[MUISC: "8" by Billie Eilish cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
Hello my beans! Who is Gracie? I am Gracie! Welcome
or welcome back to my channel. Before we get
started I wanna let you guys know what’s
happening in California right now. In case
you haven’t heard, it’s on fire! And we
also have the most COVID cases. However, in
the midst of this pandemic, and also during
these terrible conditions, migrant workers
are still working on farms and fields. Yes,
they are still working to put food on our
tables. I’ve linked a GoFundMe in the description;
it was made by a California resident who asked
them what they needed. So, please check that
out. Thank you. Today I’m gonna be talking
about things that I personally struggle with
while regressed and how I cope. Disclaimer
I am not a therapist, I am not your therapist,
this is all based on the information that
I have read from articles, books, and videos
I’ve watched, and I’ve also been in therapy
for a very long time. This is a warning: we
will be discussing some heavier topics in
this video that aren’t suitable for children.
I will leave timestamps in the description
if you need to skip over things. I have resources
linked in the descriptions, and I’ll see
how many videos I can reference with the little
"i" card. So let's answer some "who" questions.
Who am I talking about in this video? Well,
I'm mostly talking about people who regress
as a symptom. However people with a variety
of mental disorders- or even if you don't have
any- might find this video beneficial and you
may relate to parts of it. Symptoms can go
across multiple disorders, and I personally
can experience these problems whether I'm
regressed or not- but this video is obviously
focused on regressing. I understand that not
everybody has access to therapy or medication,
but a common theme with all of these struggles
that I'll be listing out is that a lot of them
can be helped with CBT, which is Cognitive
Behavioral therapy, as well medications. And
these coping tools I'll be presenting to you
can help alongside of that. Also, majority of
these coping skills are really good for short-term
relief, which is why I recommend therapies
and medications to help in the long-term. That's
going to build a good foundation for you.
[MUISC: "8" by Billie Eilish cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
Let's talk about anxiety attacks and panic attacks
first. You may have heard people use them interchangeably, but there is actually a difference.
My simple way of explaining the difference is that anxiety and anxiety attacks typically stem from worries
about the future. A panic attacks is about
something that you feel in danger or threatened
by immediately. They have very similar symptoms,
but the root cause of them is just a little
different. The things that help with an anxiety
attack may different than what helps with
a panic attack, depending on the individual,
or it might help both. Something else we need
to compare is what our current present older
self is like when we're having a panic attack
versus our regressed self. Older me reacts
to certain coping skills differently
than younger me. Younger me is a lot
more sensitive, she requires completely different
things. And for you they might be different
or they might be the same.
My first suggestion is breathing exercises.
You can look up breathing exercises for anxiety
or panic attacks on YouTube and you'll find
plenty of videos. I've also seen GIFS of these
little animations where it's contracting and then
expanding and you breathe with it. A breathing
exercise that I learned is one that I actually
took from taking choir. I just snap *snapping*
and breathe in for 8, hold for 4, and out for 8-
or some variation of that. Another good one
is safety scripts. Safety scripts are great
for both panic attacks and anxiety attacks
because they work to bring you back into the
present. An example of a safety script would
be saying this out loud: My name is Gracie.
It is August 20th 2020.
I am in my bedroom, my dad is home, I am safe.
Now this is one of those things really only
help me when I'm regressed, and not when I'm
big Gracie, but chewing and sucking on things
have been shown to reduce stress. Of course
be careful with what you chew on and also
how often you do it. You don't wanna ruin your
teeth. But I did buy this little chew-able
elephant from Stimtastic. And I've already
had a panic attack since buying it and it
came in handy because I was small and I needed
something. I've found distractions can
be really helpful for things like anxiety attacks
because it keeps me from thinking about the
thing in the future that's giving me anxiety.
Whereas with a panic attack I use all of the
other ones I've listed before instead because
the distraction isn't going to work- at least
in my experience. Typically I'll do the distraction
after the panic attack. [laughs] Why am I smiling and
laughing this is not happy.
[gasp] Weird coping mechanisms.
Distractions that help big Gracie are not
the same distractions that help small Gracie-
well okay some of them are the same but there's
enough of a difference that I'm putting it
out there. Put on your favorite smallspace
cartoon. Listen to music that makes you feel
small and happy. Put on a cute little outfit
that makes you feel tiny. Play with your stuffed
animals. Anything like that. The last thing
that you'll wanna think about once you are
in a better state of mind is what caused it
to happen? What was the trigger? And it may
not seem obvious at first. I know for me there
are certain times of day where it's just worse.
At nighttime I am way more susceptible to
having a panic attack, so at night time is
when I have all of my resources and coping
tools ready just in case it happens. I probably
don't make it any better by anticipating it,
but that's a different discussion. If you know
that there's a certain sound, a certain smell,
or a certain person that caused it, do your
best to remove the stressor from your life
if you're able to. Oh my God I'm so sweaty.
It is very hot in here and I can't have my
fan going because it makes too much noise.
It's okay, we're gonna get through this, sweaty and all.
[MUISC: "8" by Billie Eilish cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
Now let's talk about dissociating
while you're regressed. For me personally, when
I am regressed, it actually feels like a form
of dissociation. Not everybody experiences
it that way though. That's just me. And this
is common in dissociative disorders, PTSD, and
Borderline Personality Disorder, just to name
a few. Like I said before, those same breathing
techniques can help a lot. There's also the
safety scripts as well, bringing yourself back
into the present. And then specifically grounding
techniques that utilize your senses. This can
also help with anxiety and panic attacks. Chew
some gum, smell an orange, maybe you have some
perfume. Grab your stuffies and squeeze them
and touch them. Another thing that I like to
do is I'll just squeeze my thigh 'cause that
takes care of a couple of things. I'm touching
something with my hand and then also I can
feel my body and remind myself that yes, I
am real, and so are you. Now, distractions can
also be great, but in my experience they need
to be interactive distractions. Meaning that
I can't just put on a video because I'm just
going to dissociate while the video is playing.
That's not gonna help at all. I need to do
something that is very hands on. I gifted some
putty in the mail- thank you so much Manny-
and Manny got me different consistencies like
firm, and soft, and extra soft- this is the the
extra soft. Using this has helped while I'm
dissociated and it helps with other things
too. I love the color of it, I love the way
it feels, and it gives me something to do. I
can be present. Some other examples of interactive
distractions are things like coloring. You
can also do distractions that are productive
or some that are just relaxing, too. For me
personally I prefer relaxing distractions
when I am having anxiety, and when I'm dissociated
I prefer more productive ones- or at least
the ones that require more work because I'm
able to just push myself to come back to reality.
Not every situation warrants me to push myself
to come back. If it's at the very end of the
day, and I'm just checked out, I just go to bed.
And for me when I'm dissociated personally,
like, I just feel like I'm already asleep anyway.
So that would be an example of where I don't
have to do much I just gotta, you know knock out.
Another one that I am currently trying
is setting alarms during the day. Specifically
during the times of day where you may have
seen a pattern that that's when you dissociate
the most. For me that's between noon and 4-
which is when I'm supposed to be filming- and
I'll let you guys know if that works. I'm still
trying it. And of course just like anxiety,
you want to identify triggers. If you're able
to figure out what time of day it happens
most, or what environment it happens most, if
certain noises trigger it, maybe certain people,
maybe even food, who knows. Being able to identify
these triggers will help you adapt to them.
You can also avoid certain things too if you're,
you know, able to.
[MUISC: "8" by Billie Eilish cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
Hi, it's a new day, welcome back.
I apologize if you hear any weird background
noises. People are being loud. In this section
I wanted to touch on intrusive thoughts as
well as BFRBs. In general, everyone has intrusive
thoughts on occasion. It does become an issue
when it goes to the extremes, and you'll commonly
see that in disorders such as OCD, PTSD, and
EDs. And I find them particularly disturbing
when I'm regressed. It's important to remind
yourself that you are not your thoughts. And
if it helps, try writing them down, write down
how they make you feel. I've also found that
distractions, especially interactive ones, tend
to help with those. And any self-soothing techniques
that you have can also help with any shame
or fear that comes along with them. Now when
it comes to Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors,
this is something that I'm only recently learning
how to combat. My biggest issue is skin picking.
Skin picking on my face, as well as on my arms,
and sometimes even my legs. And I will personally
spend hours looking in front of the mirror
just destroying my face and sometimes I don't
even realize it. And I've come to learn that
this behavior is very anxiety driven. And it's
also based in a "all or nothing" mindset. If
you wanna learn more about BFRBs you can click
the link in the description, and I've also
linked a worksheet that goes along with the
video. One way I've been able to combat this,
especially when I'm small, is having some kind
of fidget. This is a little squishy that I
got from Stimtastic. I also got these really
cute bandaids. Sometimes I'll put them on my
fingers so that way I can feel when I'm doing
it because sometimes I don't notice that I'm
doing it. Or I just put them on my face and
they're really cute and fun.
[MUISC: "8" by Billie Eilish cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
In this last section
I wanted to touch on hypersexuality. I feel
like it's just not talked about enough, so
there won't be any beating around the bush,
we're just gonna get straight into it. Some
common causes of hypersexuality can be sexual
assault, CSA, BPD, Bipolar Disorder, and OCD. These
can be sexual thoughts, images, impulsiveness.
I know I said regression is a nonsexual thing,
and you're absolutely right, it has nothing
to do with anything sexual. However, for those
of us who are hypersexual, that doesn't always
just turn off automatically when we're regressed.
And especially if you're someone like me, who
has been hypersexual from a very very young
age, like embarrassed to say out loud what
age it started, no matter how young we regress
we're never going to escape these symptoms.
And along with that, much like the intrusive
thoughts I was talking about earlier, it comes
with shame and often fear, too. And when you're
in the mindset of a child there's even less
understanding of what's going on. It's in theory
a safe space that my brain retreats to as
a defense, right? Yet it's not safe from that
sort of thing unfortunately. And I wanna let
you know, if you're a regressor or even if
you're not, you're not alone in this. It can
be difficult but, similarly to the intrusive
thoughts, I try to write them down. Or if I'm
really small, I try to draw a picture that represents
how it makes me feel or what it is that I'm
thinking about. Again, the interactive distractions
can be helpful, and also when I recognize when
it's starting and what causes it, I can try
to replace that behavior or that thought process
with something different. There is really like
a cure that just magically works. It takes
hard work and time. Thank you so much for watching.
I hope you guys can find this helpful or beneficial
in some way. Feel free to have an open discussion
in the comments about these topics. Even if
you aren't able to access medications or therapies,
if you're watching this video then you could
definitely look some things up and try to
inform yourself better. Use the resources that
that you have to the best of your ability.
Take care of yourselves, be nice to yourselves,
you got this. Patron Time BOOP!
[MUSIC: "herbal tea" by Artificial.Music]
