I....am *attempt at Korean*
*Markiplier.exe has broken*
uhhhm
(he said "I am Korean person")
And the translation for that is
*blows rasberry at his kind fans*
That means I'm Korean...
and as a proud Korean that means
I have a deep yearning connection with my home countries,
My motherlands...(depressed sigh at his failure of word association)
My mother's lands ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)... *beeping in background*
What are Koreans known for?
Reason 1: (Red Velvet)
Yeah...that
Reason 2: (Big Bang)
Oh yeah that too!
(My mind) WGHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
But also, and most importantly......
beauty products
*plop*
*plop*
*small plop*
*woosh*
*woosh, again*
*MISSED*
[Trying Again]
....beauty products
When we were in Korea, we actually bought a bunch of these.
Amy took me to the store called....
*Insert confusion*
bIg kOreAn Al'S BeaUtY bArn bOnaZa
So, I have a variety of;
face masks,
*Abuse* face lifting things,
*911 whats your emergency* nose things,
*Glass cracking sound* lip things,
*Oof* eye things...
uhm...
masks...
This torture device, masks
BTS (Idol plays)
masks...(you said masks like the third time now idiot)
and masks! (make that four)
Uhm...
So I'm gonna start because
I obviously know what I'm doing.
Hold on to so--oh, why is it wet? ( ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡° )
Amy: It's a face mask...
Why do face masks need to be wet?
Amy: What do you think a face mask is??
*his own language* It goes on your face! Doesn't mean it has to be W E T!
Amy: Oh no...
WHAHAHAT?!!?!?!?!?!
Amy: *giggle* You're in for a treat
(HAHA)
*Mark noises*
Ah ha haaa
Wait, which way does it go on my face? *Mark's stupid question counter: 1*
Why do you have to peel it off? *2*
If it's already wet
why wouldn't it just be there? *3*
Do I stick the 'peel' side on my face? *4*
Is there like an active ingredient in this? *5*
How smooth is my skin gonna be by the end of this?
*666* (Same)
Ooo, g00py. Umm...that's a texture :/
Aaaaaah...
Oooooh...
JoOOahh
That means I like (in Korean)
So this is puss...
I feel like Dwight Schrute (from "The Office") when he cuts off the dummy's face
And goes
*Mark makes shlurping noises*
You know what I'm talkin' about?
Don't look at my tits. D:<
I'm sure there are instructions on here of how long you're supposed to keep this on
But there's only three
pictures here, and the middle one shows a clock that either goes fifteen minutes or three hours.
I can't quite tell... It takes up a quarter of the time-circle-thing...clock !
*laughing that eventually gets morphed into some weird shit*
How's it look?
Amy: ....good..!
Cool...
Amy: What's it called?
...Puss
Go-yang-ie that's cat (in Korean)
*more Korean attempts*
(Good job Mark)
PUss (Nevermind)
Okay!
Well, this has been fun...
*Ripping sounds that don't exist*
(I'm in the wrong video this is ASMR)
*sMACK*
(Missed)
*SMACK* x12
Beautiful
There's also this BTS box...
*Idol*
*fffFWwwuUU* (Mark spitting the paper out)
*Idol but distorted*
(Mark spits out paper, again)
Koreans don't believe in scissors!
*Idol progressively intensifies the dank as more and more stuff comes out of the box*
*THUD*
What's that? Oh, the delivery bird from The Hunger Games is here!
Amy: Peep peep peep peep
(Mark laughter/wheezes)
Amy: Tweet tweet
(quiet) ha Ha ha ha
WO-ha-haha-OOW
That was so cute.
Ah, my nip! Nooo, don't look
Or maybe do... ;)
I know how to put this on
*visible confusion*
Do I do it like....?
*boops the snoot*
(Struggleplier)
Is it like...
...Is it like this???
Amy: You wear headbands!
Okay, I'm just- I'm working through it let me do it
(Struggleplier returns)
Amy: You got to push all your hair forward...
Whu-hu I gotta move it
mY HeAd IS VeRy LaRgE
You know what I'm gonna put this robe on like backwards because
I'm having nip exposure problems
Amy: It's like you're at a hair salon!
Yea exactly
It's a bib. Can I get chicken tendees Mom? Wait!
*Sudden realization*
*TERRIFYING MUSIC*
*Hurry up Mark*
Yeeeeeaaaah..?!
(Ew)
Amy: *oddly claps*
KACHOW *finger guns*
*inhale*
*sigh*
All right, we opened up the BTS one. Oh, yeah instructions.
*sensual ripping of package*
Okay, it's just step one of the kit
(fangirl screaming)
STEP 2 of the kit
(more fangirl screaming)
STEP 3
(each of these screams is getting higher pitched BTW)
STEP 4 *Giggling*
*male screaming* AAAA
*while laughing* Who's buying this to get the exclusive postcards?
So they come with their own face masks we've got NMF
*horrible pronunciation* Aquarium Ample Mask X
That was in English *wow*
We've got tea tree care solution essential mask X. Okay. That was words!
Why is it wet?( ͡°  ͜ ʖ͡° )
Why is it so wet?!?! (Where's the Dumb Question Counter?)
It's so wet (Yea you may have mentioned that)
I forgot that was up there (spooped nervous laughter)
It's- OHHHHH
oooooOOOHHHJ
It's so goopy, it's like snot it's like someone sneez-
It's like someone did something other than sneezing into this...
*realization*
BTS? ;;;;))
Why would someone look forward to this? Cuz I imagine people would be like,
"*GASP* WOO I can't wait to go home and PuT oN My BTS MaSk
and look at the postcards *kawaii mark giggle*"
*some chill tunes in the background*
*HUH* its so cold
Should I have shaved for this?(I think the Dumb Question Counter is broken)
Korean men aren't known for their facial hair…or body hair...or hair in general
Am I beautiful yet? (Sure Mark, sure)
I'm only on the second mask. Why are you laughing at me?
Is this funny to yo- *chuckles* Is this funny to you?
I'm not gonna bother with all of these because I think I get the general gist of it
*stuff falling*
That's what you wanted, right?
*Amy shaking a BTS mask*
I feel a natural inclination to push my lips out farther
This is why Silver Shepherd had the accent he did
Because I felt like I needed to do this to get my lip acting in there
So I also have-
My hands are so covered in BTS semen *Amy giggles* that I can't actually grab this
*wheezy laugh*
What are you laughing at
oH God
MMMH
Like all my problems in life my teeth solve it
Lip
*snorts* that's not black...that's not black at all!
Look at this lady on the back- zoom in on this!
*mark makes a WasSSH-sounding noise*
*indistinct Amy muttering*
aaOugh!
I thought that was going to end my life!
Alright so this is lip
so I won't be able to talk for a while.
So I'm going to have subtitled all of my actual thoughts afterwards, okay?
*silence*
ItS nO blAnK iTs tHe fiElD
A prIsTINE MeADOW of UnTOUCHEd WhITE
nO aNimaLs cAlm
nO biRDs cRy
oNlY thE steEdY rUsTlING oF wInD tHroUgH dEAd trEeS acCeNTeD bY tHE iMpAct Of hIs aXe
A cRaCk liKE tHuNder rINgs oUt aS thE aNcIEnt pINe FInalLy suCCuMbs to hIs mURdeRoUs aSaUlT
THe oLd gIAnT CrAsHeS iNtO tHE grOUnD
DAmi-"
*PFFFFFFT*
ANYWAY....
now it's time to move on
*Giggle*
I feel beautiful
*r u b b i n g*
urgh
ooOOOOO
Okay, I'm going back this looks stupid doesn't it?
my t!ts
MY tits
Breast mask
I've got this because I want my boobs to be as supple as possible
I should have shaved, but I didn't so
We're going to have to do...*giggles*
It's like an obstacle course *fumbles*
for the mask
so..
*snorts*
Do they go up or do they go down?
Which seems right
This?!
*Heavy: NAHW*
This is why I wore the robe.
OOhuh it's cold!
*Smacks* (smack it good ;D)
*smacking but slightly quieter*
*nvm its loud again*
Alright! One down!
One to go! This is probably the most unflattering video I've ever done.
*snazzy music*
smACKING
I'm just making sure they stick! Is that good? Does that look good? Good.
Anyway
*more...smacking*
theYrE sliPPING OFF
I don't know why
Specifically you want your boobs to be moisturized and no other part of you
*burping* UH
But I feel a cool tingling sensation. So that's nice
Amy: You can cover your tum...
*sad* What's wrong with my tum?..
Amy: With your next mask!
Whats wrong with my tum?!?!
So this also comes with
um a
Associated belly mask.
See these aren't wet. These aren't wet. Very dry!
Why does this smell like menthol?
Now, see, I'm getting out of frame here for a second. I have two bellybuttons
Because I had surgery that went in down here
Laparoscopically, so I have to make a choice
Which belly button I want- Imma go for big Bongo
*slapping noise intensifies*
I'm happy
can this be the thumbnail? Or will it be instantly demonitised? *Laughter*
Amy: Your face isn't in it
I know! (mark suddenly realizes something) No, my face is in it!
alright, so... those are tingly
Man, if only buddha had this in his time
Alright, so there's this other thing. It's like a- it's like a lifting mask
So when your chin gets real droopy, I guess? Cuz the bone has a tendency to wander over time
so you want to make sure that chin stays in place where it belongs so you have these masks that kind of
StreUTch underneath your chin
Uh, to give you a lifting sensation or something like that.
Does this like hook over my ears or what?
Okay, my head's huge so I don't know how well this is gonna work. But...
No pain no gain am I right?
Under the chin... STREEEEETCH.. it up
*reads Korean*
*Markipier noises and NIPZOOM*
*more reading*
Now, that sounds like a being racist. I'm not making fun of the Korean language. I'm reading it
TUNG
HA
YOOOOO-
Ah.... I have this ... thing called the smile maker
Shit!
*pats*
It's called the smile maker. Now this looks like an anatomical drawing of the uterus
*zooms in on said anatomical smile uterus*
Am I wrong?
So you're supposed to bite down hard on this.
"Place the u-shaped parts into each side of the mouth"
*struggles in life*
(Chipmunk Mark is that you?)
(Yea, it's me)
(mumbled) I'm happy!
Smile maker stretches the muscles on the lip
And this could help you have a brighter smile, wear this product three times a day just for one minute
I also have this green tea nose pack
That is for your nose.
Is this the thing that sucks out the gunk in your whores?(pores)
Oh, yeah its the thing that sucks out gunk in your whores (pores)
its the thing tha- *swoosh* *rips*
What is it then?
Amy: I don't think it is..
Its gotta be that thing
that sucks out the-... gunk from your doors(pores)
I also have....
*slurps very loudly*
*chokes*
eye things
so.... your eyes
This is the Korean flag
has the yin and yang
the blue and the red
so this is the identity of the culturrr
so you take-a dis
and you
(Please take that thing out of your mouth)
This is called eyyeeeehhhh
Ah my eye! Too close!
*cries*
Okay
ahhhh
Is this fun now (word that we can't determine)?
*Gulps*
OW, so, um... I don't know what they mean by brighter smile
Is my smile brighter?
Okay. Anyway, um, so
Cut the strawberries shit. This just says it's a mask sheet - slice mask sheet.
There
Cute right, ah it's in my eyes,
it keeps drifting up into my eyes.. must be my magnetic personality :D
*mumbled* ah ok..
Am I beautiful? (Yea)
Okay, cool. I think I can take this off now. My chin feels properly lifted.
see I don't know what effect this is supposed to be. It doesn't even feel like it's tight
Like, none of these products feel like they're doing anything. I like it when something hits my skin that it burns
It feels like it's melting and that way I know that it works. It's like mouthwash
You only know when it working when it hurts.
They say beauty is pain, but this is easy
I've got a moisture foot pack, but for the sake of all the foot fetishists out there,
I'm not going to do that.
Everybody knows the hands are the foots of the hands (...)
So this is a foot mask, but to thwart off-
*RIIIP*
The foot fet-ishisists I miss -this is a diaper this looks like a diaper
*crinkling*
This is a diaper.. nothing convinces me this is not a diaper
*Amy giggles in the bg*
Everything about this is screaming diaper.
UGHH I hit the wet spot
(mark is in pain, sobbing. save him)
euGH
uGh
ha-huuwh
euUGH
eUUUUhuh
euuuUGHGHGH
*cough*
OOOOOOOOOGH
hah
EEEEEUUUGH
It's just like putting your hand inside a dead animal
this is a moist goopy dead animal, it's cold
It's rubbery.
This is implicating me in a lot of sticking my hand in dead animals
But okay, I've never stuck my hand in a dead animal. That it's the first thing that jumped into mind
It's like sticking your hand in a used diaper
That's been left out sitting for a while
So it got cold and I don't know if I'd rather have a warm diaper or a cold diaper but right now (WhAtt?)
I'd want to try a warm diaper (WhY?)
Just to get some kind of difference so I can- compare
I don't know how it could be better with your feet
*sLApY*
I think- I think the internet would kill me if I didn't put on this mask
eh
oh my god
*MOIST SLAP*
Alright
Shrek! Shreeek!(SoMeBodY OncE TolD Me tHE WorLD Is GoNNa ROOll mE)
I missed you Shrek.(i AIn"t THe SHArpeSt TOOl iN THe sssShhHeeeeEddDDD)
Oh yeah
it both doesn't feel any different than the other masks and it feels
Completely different from the other masks,
but I think that's just the sense of power
I get from wearing Shrek's face
Chica (doggo is summoned)
Amy: Who's out here puppies?~
Chica!
Amy: Kiki beep!
ah BoooOOoooo!
you want up?
*pat pat*
(A DOGGO APPEARS)
Come on
Have we ever introduced Henry?
OH, this is Henry
*SNAZZY MUSIC*
Umm
Okay, bye Henry
CHICAAAAA (more doggo summoning)
GOOD GUUURL, ohohoh good.
You're okay. It's all good. Good girl. Okay. Yeah, so, this is Henry and Chica (double doggos)
Chica, do you remember me?
You recognize me?
We need to be the BTS.
Give me one wag for yes and two wags for heEELLLL YESSS
I take these off
HYAAAAAAAAAAAA
*sad moist flop*
*MISS*
...
EYAA
*Missed*
(thats an oof)
*sad flop*
Oh-kay
hi henry
Amy: Nice butt henry
Okay, okay, Chica
you're not gonna like this
I know you want to be beautiful right pup
O yea
Say yes if you want to be beEauUutifulL
heere we-
Oh, Oh god
we're beautiful
*Awkward silence*
*doggo licky sounds*
Henry do you want a mask?
WOOOoooOOOW!
So pretty!
So unbeliev-abl-e-so-
*EXTRA WET SLAP*
so preeettyyyyyyy
all right good girl. Thank you
woah hey
fewhiofhiufugiwrgbger
(More obnoxious noises <3) *Henry: oH God*
okeee alright then
(doggos have left the chat)
ah
pfft
Its just so cute
ahah- who knew-
Who knew Shrek could be so goddamn cute
ahahahaha
That is just too pretty that's too precious
ahahahahA
*pat pat pat pat*
That's terrifying
All right, so there's only one thing left to try
ewwww
oooOO
So this is umm
This is a bubble clay mask when it reacts with air it gets all bubbly
*Camera whacking as Amy comes to the rescue*
okay, so
uhh This is the bubble mask
So when you put this on your face, it starts to bubble up
And since I can't see anything I can only go by sensation
But I've got this weird tingling tickling sensation going all across my n0se.
So, um, with that being said, I guess I can rate my favorite
masks,
I definitely like the breast mask.
I'm not just saying that because I like boobs( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I'm saying that because it wasn't sopping wet
When I first put it on, it had a nice menthol to it
so I knew it was working because I could feel it tingle on my titties ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and then I actually had the belly mask on and
I could really smell the menthol and that worked out well for me. So I like that
Um- this lifting thing?
I have no idea how that's even supposed to- how they even think that supposed to work
I don't know. It's- its slogan is my special secret of jaw line management
And uh
I didn't know how much jaw line management I needed in my day-to-day life, but
Now I have some as opposed to zero so I suppose that's good. These are horrible
BTS Dreamboats, thank you for so much
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) moisture
umm
nose things didn't grab anything
Uhh these: cute as a fucking button
look at Shrek *anime girl laughing*
My god. So cute ^_^
Smile brightener, the smile maker
I don't know
I'm not gonna stick this in my mouth again, just
Because it's covered in many different fluids now
and then uhh I will cherish these till the end of my days
I'll hang them up above my bed, and I will enjoy them in my privacy of my own home ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Eye mask? I like those. Those are cool. They were like gel- not very cost-effective
They only get one. That's stupid. Unless you're supposed to reuse 'em?
Why can't you reuse these?
Amy: Because you used up all the liquid
Put more liquid on
Amy: You were complaining about that (Facts)
Yeah...well...
I'm just sayin...
FIR🌲
It's like-that's like printer ink
That's what that is. It's-it's-the whole beauty market is like printer ink it's just meant you to "BUY, BUY, BUY
things that may be work not approved by the FDA OOoooO it's made in Korea. They don't even have FDA"
Who knows if it works... but
Considering this is all part of my proud proud proud heritage, I'm gonna just pray to my BTS shrine ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  and uh
ask my mom why the hell I bought all these
The take away is the price of beauty is high and
The price of beauty is higher if you buy a hundred and twenty dollars worth of it in Korea and then bring it with you
Back home to try for a video. So
thank you everybody so much for watching
Thank you for staying beautiful. And if you want to stay beautiful, I've got no tips for you
So look somewhere else other than me
but if you've got other cool things that you want me to try out whether it's beauty products, makeup,
Different toys, other gadgets, candy from other countries, food from other countries. Let me know it down in the comments below
I wouldn't mind trying new things every week or so
So thank you everybody so much for watching, check out the other cool crazy stuff that I've done in the description or in the suggested videos over there
So thanks again. And as always, I will see you in the next video
Buh Bye! <3
