ego is the enemy it can you take that
too far I can joke about myself all day
and be ok but also I don't want
co-workers not to take me seriously so
that's actually kind of two questions
it's talking about ego and that's
talking about joking around right those
are those are two different things a
little bit like self-deprecating yeah
yeah yeah and so can you can you be too
humble and put your ego in so much check
that it hurts you yes actually you can't
you know hey echo how's it going I'm in
charge um I'm really horrible at this
you know I just don't know what I'm
doing right that's not good you know
it's like I said to the marine
lieutenant right am i tell them to going
in to check in and say hey guys I you
know I just don't I just got here just
got out of the basic school I don't know
anything really do you want to follow
that guy no now that's what I'm talking
about
super can you be overly humble yes like
I said it's okay to admit that you don't
know everything but that doesn't mean
don't be well-prepared that doesn't mean
don't be confident that you can figure
things out that doesn't mean you can't
ask good questions right it doesn't mean
that you don't report in without knowing
the nomenclature and the fundamentals
right that's gonna you know hey Jocko
just checked in but he knows what our
missions been he knows what our mission
statement is he knows how our basic
process is he already looked at all that
he knows everyone's name yeah I'm
prepared I'm prepared so that's what you
want to be that's not saying I have no
idea what I'm doing right now I just got
here
no no that's not what we're talking
about so don't be overly humble most
people the reason I talk about the other
one of be humble all the time is because
most people tend towards letting their
ego be inflated that's what most people
tend towards so I tend to talk more
about hey keep your ego in check when
you weren't checking because most people
they're so scared of looking bad
they say well I know how to do this I've
never seen it before I know how to do
that never seen it before
you're gonna look stupid hey guys hey
I've been put in charge of this I know
you guys been doing it for a while look
for to learn from you and how you
execute it and and driving forward and
keeping kicking ass in this mission does
anyone get mad at that no hmm it that's
a lot different than hey guys I have no
idea what's happening that's too much
yeah so don't go there and be humble but
not not passive
put your ego in check but don't turn
into a baby or another dance the second
part of this is caution about joking
around too much and that's you know
that's different from too much ego and
absolutely you can joke around too much
now of course and we've talked about
this a good team and a good leader
they're having fun they're having fun
with everything that you're doing and I
always had fun I was at fun I still have
fun all the time
I'm having fun but if all you do is joke
around all the time but then when it
comes time for the jokes to be over
people won't take you seriously so that
will be problematic you know I had a
rule that was no joking on the radios
right so if you were on a radio you
weren't allowed to take make jokes no
joking on the radio and what's cool
about because you know int asking a
bruiser when I was a platoon commander I
was a system commander we had fun all
the time we laughed we joked we had a
blast with everything we did no joking
on the radio you see him saying that was
a law no joking on the radio and what
was good about it was as I think back to
that what that translated to was we're
not joking around in the field and that
expanded like when were briefing we're
not joking around it was a very clear
distinction of course did people have we
did things happen out in the field
sometimes were like oh my god this is
hilarious of course that happened but
the general 99% of the time 95% of the
time was hey we're in the field we're
working we are serious that's the
priority did we have fun in the field
yes did I laugh in the field yes but the
priority and this norm was we are going
we are serious and we are that's the
priority
so don't joke so much that you don't get
taken seriously one time I was with a
senior ranking officer a flag officer
an officer with stars and we went to go
brief I wasn't attached this unit but
they were they went to go brief this
unit or we went to go receive a brief
from a unit and in the brief in a
PowerPoint slide these guys had put a
slide in that was an inappropriate slide
and it was a crude joke hmm and it was
really funny I thought it was really
funny you know I was like ha that's
pretty funny that these guys did that
yoga I saw the slide they had it up
there and it was completely
inappropriate and and and vulgar right
that's what it was they didn't know this
general at all and he was a very
straight-laced guy and didn't appreciate
that kind of humor hmm and they they had
like the Welcome slide the next slide
that came up was this inappropriate
vulgar slide what was it what was it it
was it was it was it was it was
inappropriate I'll leave it at that
and and you know it was like there was a
chuckle in the room
mm-hm and at the same time there was
nothing but silence in the room you
could feel the discomfort and and since
like I said I thought it was funny and I
knew it wasn't gonna go over well soon
as I saw us oh this is not good
and the reason I'm telling this big long
story is because I have another rule
don't put jokes into your slides in
PowerPoint no jokes
because you can you can articulate the
joke because you can feel the room out
and see what's going on you can get it
get a taste you can get a feel for them
if you if you walk in if they would have
had a chance if I could have said freeze
the first slides up you've met the
general here for four five minutes do
you want to remove that slide they'd be
like oh absolutely let's get it out of
that cuz they could see that he was a
serious guy and not you know one to be
that wants to be seen that kind of thing
it didn't take wasn't hard it was a
pretty easy book to read but you don't
have that opportunity
there was no hold on we're gonna delete
this slide no there it was boom welcome
it was though it was after the slide of
you know this is where we are it was the
Welcome slide and I said oh so no joking
on the radio no
your slides keep your slides clean and
and the the risk-benefit you tell a good
joke hey that's great you get you know
two credits right if your joke is bad
and considered inappropriate its
negative 39 not worth it
yeah it's not worth it yeah and again
I'm all about you know you you want to
have fun when you're briefing you want
people to be entertained and have fun
but you don't want to have it
appropriate stuff no yeah so that's that
for both these for both these things am
i joking too much or am I being too
serious am i you know is my ego too big
or am I being too humble you it's
balanced it's a dichotomy leadership and
you got to find the right spot in the
middle and you got to check yourself and
you kind of you know if your team is
joking when they shouldn't be joking
guess what you're leading them the wrong
direction yeah if your team is somber
and doesn't have any spirit you're not
having a good enough time so you got to
find the balance there same thing with
ego you know are people talking with you
and communicating with you and being
open with you and telling you when they
disagree with things or is no one
talking to you because if that's the
case your egos so big that they don't
want to talk to you hmm so find the
dichotomy leadership to find the balance
between those two dang that's a good one
if they're if they're not talking to you
yeah cuz you know how at work you're
talking with your friends you know and
then somebody comes that person comes
here like you know yeah for whatever
reason you're not necessarily talking
about them or nothing but they come in
your country you got to stop your
conversation you know yeah that's like a
little indicator you know if you roll up
to so you see people across the room
talking and you're like hey that looks
like a cool conversation or whatever or
I go say hi to Paul whatever and you go
and they stop talking and they stop like
laughing they just stop talking and they
give you like small talk or whatever
that's that's I indicated yeah yeah it's
an indicator it could be actually either
one of those two if people are having a
good time and you walk in and they stop
laughing oh okay and if you walk in and
they're having a conversation then they
don't they just you know don't want to
talk to you you know they're probably if
I don't like your big ego that's
slapping them in the face
but you're you go and check
