Use Your Hands To Communicate Like A Badass
[0:00:00]
So, you’re walking across the stage about
to give a presentation to a hundred people
and all of a sudden you started to think,
what do I do with my hands?
Well, you can’t get rid of them, but do
you put them behind you?
Do you put them next to your side?
Do you bring them up?
You feel awkward.
Guys, if this is you, you’re going to love
today’s video.
We’re talking about hand placement when
you’re walking or talking.
What to do with your hands when you’re nervous.
Are you ready, guys?
Let’s get into it.
[Music]
So, let’s start things off by talking about
why it’s so important that when you speak
you talk with your hands as well.
This is based on the 2005 study coming out
of the University of Rome.
People are more likely to listen to you when
you’re using your hands.
So, if a number of people are speaking, you’re
going to listen to the person whose hands
are moving.
And then, when you’re listening to them,
you’re actually more likely to hear them
even if they’re speaking with the same voice.
When you don’t have hand movements, people
can’t hear you as well.
Next up, they’re more likely to understand
what you just said and they’re more likely
to remember what you just said.
And the last two points I think are pretty
obvious when it comes to hand gestures is
they help you exaggerate and add emphasis
to what you’re saying and, they express
your state of mind, basically, your level
of emotions.
Now, before I get into specific hand gestures.
I want to talk about best practices.
So, let’s draw a box right here.
We’re going to go about 36 inches and then
about 24 inches down.
This is the box that you want your hand gestures
to fit into.
And basically, you’re going to stay within
this box.
If you go outside the box, you are crazy man.
If you have no gestures at all, you are robot.
This is very culturally-based.
So, you’re going to find maybe in Canada
over in India very different than it is in
the United States over in England or Australia.
So, how many gestures per minutes should you
be using with your hands when you’re giving
a presentation when you’re talking to people?
Well, if you’re doing ten or less, that
is low.
If you’re doing forty or more, that is a
bit high.
Now, there’s an interesting study over at
the Science of People and they looked at the
best TEDx speakers when they’re giving presentations.
Twenty six gestures per minute is what the
best average.
Now, what about holding things when you’re
giving a presentation maybe a clicker?
So, you go to the slides, maybe you want to
have a pen, so you can do a point you’ve
got a laser pointer or just you want to have
something in your hands.
I think this is good especially if you’ve
got bad habits which we’ll get into here
in a few minutes.
But, I’ve got certain little things that
I do when I’m talking, I’ll touch my ring
finger, I’ll go over and touch my watch.
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All right, gentlemen.
So now, let’s talk about the ten useful
hand gestures and positions that any man can
use.
First up, open hands.
This is all about honestly.
It’s showing your hands, showing that you
have nothing in your hands that you’re not
going to attack the other person.
Next up, we’ve got open arms.
This is showing you’ve got nothing to hide.
Now, again, don’t go overly crazy here unless
that is your intention.
But open arms, it signals I want to bring
you in, I am open to your ideas and to what
you’re bringing.
Next up, we’ve got the fist pump.
Oh, yeah, this is signaling victory that something
good just happened.
This is about emphasis and sending a signal
of strong emotion.
Next up, we’ve got the hand rubbing.
This is all about plotting.
This is all about, okay, we got something
sneaky going on.
I’m thinking here, something’s going.
Basically, the wheels are turning.
Next up, we’ve got the hand on the heart.
This is showing that you are sincere that
this is coming from the heart.
Next up, we’ve got stop, halt, do not come
any farther, stop what you are doing, I’m
interrupting you.
A very powerful signal, be very careful with
this one.
Now, this one, you want to be very careful
with as well and that is pointing.
People don’t like it when you point to them,
but if you’re talking to a group and you
want to get the point across, you can point
up a bit, you can point down and oftentimes
this gets the audience to look in a specific
direction.
[0:05:08]
Now, the next example I’ve used in a number
of my videos and that is this versus that.
And I do a lot of comparisons and that’s
what we’re doing here.
We’re taking a person over and we’re being
very clear that there is something over here
and that something over here they are very
different.
Next up, we’ve got tiny versus big.
And, again, it gets the point across and helps
people remember especially useful in a story.
Next up, we’ve got the spread fingers.
And this one is showing that you are in charge,
that you are calculated, that you are calm.
You can move your fingers out.
I rarely use this one, but I do use the next
one quite a bit and that is the praying.
Now, the praying I purposely try not to use
this one.
I don’t want to send out that symbolism
with it, but what I do is this right here.
I’ve used this many times already in this
video.
I use this to emphasize a point that is important.
So, really quick, gentlemen, if you’re enjoying
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Let’s talk about the five things you don’t
want to do with your hands.
First up, your hips, you want to avoid putting
your hands here because this sends the message
that you’re condescending that you’re
overbearing that you are acting like a parent.
Next up, we’ve got crossed arms.
You’re cut off, you don’t want to be a
part of what they’re doing, you disagree.
Next up, we’ve got hands behind the back.
This makes you look like you’re inspecting
the troops that you’re aloof that you’re
above others.
Next up, we’ve got hands crossed in front.
This makes you look weak and timid.
And now, let’s talk about one that I admit
I do and that is putting my hands in my pockets.
However, there are good ways and bad ways
to do this.
Now, one of the worst things you can do with
your hands is put both of them in your pockets
fully.
This makes you look nervous, it looks like
you’re hiding something, you’re insecure,
you’re dishonest because what you’re doing
is you’re hiding the hands.
Now, how to get away with putting your hands
in your pockets?
Don’t put both, instead just put one and
either expose your thumb or your fingers.
I like exposing the thumb, I think it’s
more of a power look; the fingers, more of
a sexual look.
But what we see here with the fingers and
the thumb is that this right here is a very
relaxed pose.
Now, if you’re going to continue to put
both hands in your pockets, the best way that
you can do this is simply expose the thumb.
This right here, it just gives relax to casual
look.
Now, if you expose the fingers, the problem
here is that we’re pointing guess where?
Right at the crotch, so it’s a little bit
of a sexual pose.
So, if the purpose of your hands is to give
you balance when you’re walking, should
you just gesture when you’re walking?
I think it is fine if you’ve practiced and
you know what signals and what message you
want to send.
And this takes me to my final point and that
is to make sure that you control the gestures
that you’re using.
Everything we talked about in today’s video,
it’s about you understanding the message
you send with your hands.
All right, gentlemen.
Now, it’s your turn.
I want to hear from you down in the comments.
Notice those hand gestures there?
Guys, the point is I really do want to hear
from you, guys.
I love going down the comments and reading
how you guys are using these information to
become better men.
And, gents, don’t forget to go check out
Vincero.
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with the best discount code you’re going
to find out there.
Check out that new Rogue Collection.
Look at some of these watches, absolutely
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What?
You’re still here?
Guys, come on, get out of here.
Go check out this video right here, twenty
one body language mistakes.
If you like this video, you’re going to
love this video because I talk about what
not to do including staring at certain parts
on a woman.
Yes, guys, come on.
Go check it out.
I’m linking to this down in the description
of today’s video.
So, really quick I want to share with you
a pet peeve.
I hate it when I go down in the comments and
people are talking about the size of my hands
or I use too many hand gestures.
Guys, I can’t do anything about the size
of my hands.
This is just simply what I’ve got.
And if you’ve got big hands, you’ve got
small hands, guys, don’t let the haters
don’t let it bother you.
Guys, haters are going to hate, you just got
to get right past them, right?
Nothing I can do about the size of my hands.
It’s just simply the way I’m made.
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