FOLKS, IT'S BEEN 11 DAYS SINCE
WE HEARD DONALD TRUMP ON THE
GROPE-TOWN EXPRESS, AND A LOT OF
PEOPLE HAVE DISTANCED THEMSELVES
DONALD TRUMP, AT LEAST ONE ARM'S
LENGTH.
BUT ONE PERSON IS STANDING BY
HIM, HIS WIFE AND STRATEGIC EYE
SHADOW RESERVE, MELANIA TRUMP.
( LAUGHTER )
YESTERDAY, MELANIA DID INTERVIEW
FOR BOTH FOX NEWS AND CNN.
SHE WOULD HAVE GONE ON MSNBC,
BUT STEVE KORNACKI GETS JEALOUS
WHEN ANOTHER SUPERMODEL IS ON
THE NETWORK.
THE MAN IS AN ADONIS.
NOW, LAST NIGHT ON THE ANDERSON
COOPER POWER HOUR, MELANIA
EXPLAINED WHO SHE REALLY BLAMES
FOR DONALD TRUMP'S BEHAVIOR.
>> THEY WERE KIND OF A BOY TALK,
AND HE WAS LEAD ON, LIKE EGG ON,
FROM THE HOST TO SAY DIRTY AND
BAD STUFF.
>> Stephen: YES, IT WAS ALL
BILLY BUSH'S FAULT.
( LAUGHTER )
NOW I KNOW WHY THEY WERE ON A
BUS.
IT'S EASIER TO THROW BILLY
UNDERNEATH IT.
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
( CHEERS )
SO, LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.
MELANIA'S DEFENSE OF DONALD
TRUMP-- THE MAN WHO WROTE "ART
OF THE DEAL--" IS THAT HE GOT
OUTMANEUVERED BY A GUY WHO HAS
BEEN DEEMED BY THE "TODAY SHOW"
TO BE UNQUALIFIED TO WATCH
SOMEONE ELSE MAKE A FESTIVE
FALL FRITTATA?
IF BILLY BUSH CAN MANIPULATE
DONALD TRUMP, WE HAVE IT TOW
KEEP HIM AWAY FROM HEAVY HITTERS
LIKE MARIO LOPEZ.
WHO PUT A PICTURE OF STEVE
KORNACKI UP THERE?
JUST IMAGINE WHAT IMPACT BILLY
WILL HAVE ONCE TRUMP HAS THE
NUCLEAR CODES?
>> HEY, MR. TRUMP, THIS IS ME,
BILLY BUSH.
I THINK IT'S TIME TO TEACH
FINLAND A LESSON.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
>> I WOULD BOMB THE (BLEEP) OUT
OF 'EM.
I'D BLOW UP EVERY SINGLE INCH,
THERE WOULD BE NOTHING LEFT.
>> Stephen: GONE, FINLAND.
( LAUGHTER )
NOW, THESE MELANIA INTERVIEWS
WERE THEMSELVES A SURPRISE
BECAUSE WE'VE BARELY SEEN HER
SINCE THE REPUBLICAN CONVENTION,
WHERE SHE PLAGIARIZED MICHELLE
OBAMA.
BUT NOW THAT SHE HAS RESURFACED,
WE AT THE "LATE SHOW" WANT IN.
SO PLEASE WELCOM LIVE VIA
SATELLITE, MELANIA TRUMP.
THANK YOU.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
MRS. TRUMP, THANK YOU FOR
JOINING US.
( LAUGHTER )
>> MY PLEASURE, STEPHEN.
AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW WE ARE
COMPLETELY ALONE.
THERE IS NO ONE ELSE IN THE ROOM
COACHING ME.
( LAUGHTER ).
>> Stephen: OKAY, OKAY.
GOOD TO KNOW.
NOW, WE HAVEN'T SEEN YOU MUCH
SINCE YOUR SPEECH AT THE
CONVENTION.
>> YES, THAT IS MY CHOICE.
THEY DID NOT SEND ME TO LIVE IN
AN UNDISCLOSED LOCATION.
I AM A PRIVATE PERSON, STEPHEN.
MY LIFE IS NOT A PHOTO OP.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: SO, OKAY.
HOW ARE YOU DEALING WITH THE
PRESSURE OF THE CAMPAIGN?
>> STEPHEN, WHY ARE WE TALKING
ABOUT ME?
WE NEED TO FOCUS ON IMPORTANT
ISSUES FACING OUR NATION, LIKE
HOW THE ELECTION IS RIGGED.
>> Stephen: REALLY?
WHO'S RIGGING IT?
>> THE LEFT-WING MEDIA,
INTERNATIONAL BANKERS, AMD BILLY
BUSH.
>> Stephen: BILLY BUSH.
SO YOU DON'T BLAME YOUR
HUSBAND FOR WHAT HE SAID?
>> YES, I DO.
I SAID TO MY HUSBAND THAT THOSE
WORDS ARE VERY UNAPPROPRIATE.
PLUS, HE SAID THEM ON A BUS.
DISGUSTING.
( LAUGHTER )
THIS IS NOT THE MAN I MARRIED.
>> Stephen: WELL, HAVE YOU
FORGIVEN YOUR HUSBAND?
>> YES.
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
( CHEERS )
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE?
YES, YES, APPARENTLY BECAUSE
HE-- HE EXPLAINED IT WAS LOCKER
ROOM TALK.
I DID NOT KNOW THIS, BUT WHEN
AMERICAN MEN GATHER TO SPORT,
THEY ALWAYS BRAG OF GRABBING
WOMEN BY THE BILLY BUSH.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: I'M SORRY.
THE BILLY BUSH?
>> BOOSH.
>> Stephen: BOOSH.
OKAY.
SO YOU'VE FORGIVEN HIM.
I HAVE MORTHAN FORGIVEN,
STEPHEN.
I HAVE FORGOTTEN
>> Stephen: IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE
ANYONE CAN FORGET WHAT HE SAID.
>> FORGET WHAT WAS TODAY?
>> Stephen: OKAY, BUT NUMEROUS
WOMEN HAVE SAID THEY WERE GROPED
BY YOUR HUSBAND, AS WELL AS
BEAUTY PAGEANT CONTESTANTS WHO
SAY HE WALKED IN ON THEM WHILE
THEY WERE NAKED.
>> THOSE ARE ALL LIES, STEPHEN.
EXCEPT THE ONES WHERE THERE'S
VIDEOTAPE.
THEN IT'S LOCKER ROOM TALK.
>> Stephen: EXPLAIN SOMETHING
TO ME, HOW IS IT LOCKER ROOM
TALK WALKING IN ON PAGEANT
CONTESTANTS?
>> IT'S A WOMEN'S LOCKER ROOM.
STEPHEN.
MY HUSBAND IS KIND.
HE IS A GENTLEMAN.
>> Stephen: OKAY, HE'S A
GENTLEMAN, THEN WHY DID HE SAY
HE DIDN'T DO IT BECAUSE THEY
WERE TOO UGLY?
>> HE'S RAW.
HE TELLS IT LIKE IT IS.
AND THESE WOMEN, WOOF.
AM I RIGHT.
UP TOP.
>> Stephen: I CAN'T HIGH-FIVE
YOU OVER SATELLITE.
MRS. TRUMP, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
>> I AM FINE.
I'M CERTAINLY NOT BLINKING OUT
IN MORSE CODE THAT SOMEONE ELSE
IS IN THE ROOM TELLING ME WHAT
TO SAY.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: OKAY.
DO YOU THINK THESE SCANDALS WILL
DOOM YOUR HUSBAND'S CHANCES
AMONG WOMEN?
>> NO.
WOMEN KNOW IT'S BOY TALK.
BAD BOYS, BAD BOYS, WHAT YOU
GOING TO DO?
( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: I HATE TO POINT
THIS OUT, BUT YOUR HUSBAND ISN'T
A BOY.
HE'S A 70-YEAR-OLD MAN.
>> BOYS, MEN-- IT'S THE SAME.
NO MATTER HOW NICE THEY SEEM,
SECRETLY THEY'RE ALL
FOUL-MOUTHED
BILLY-BUSH-GRABBING PIGS.
I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND,
YOUR BROTHER, THE POPE, LUKE
SKYWALKER, ALL OF THEM.
>> Stephen: ALL MEN ARE LIKE
THIS?
>> YES.
THEY'RE ALL ANIMALS.
IF ONLY A WOMAN COULD BE
PRESIDENT.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: WELL, I DON'T KNOW
HOW TO SAY THIS, I MEAN,
MELANIA, ACTUALLY, HILLARY
CLINTON IS A WOMAN.
WHY DON'T YOU JUST VOTE FOR HER?
>> AAAHOH!
I CAN'T HEAR YOU, STEPHEN.
OH, NO, OUR CONNECTION IS
BREAKING UP.
>> Stephen: MELANIA TRUMP,
EVERYBODY.
