It's pronounced "Tee-dus".
[LAUGHS]
It's not "Tide-us".
I'm gonna piss off a lot of people here.
His name is Tideus.
♪
Oh? [LAUGHS]
♪
♪
Wait!
♪
I don't remember any of this. [LAUGHS]
♪
♪ Hold on aim is steady ♪
♪ An otherworld awaits you ♪
[LAUGHS] I..
♪ An otherworld awaits you ♪
really didn't know this was gonna happen.
♪ A thousand years, you ready ♪
♪ A thousand years, you ready ♪
This is really funny.
♪ A thousand years, you ready ♪
♪ The otherworld it takes you ♪
Tidus about to die.
Alright, bye.
Okay?
We just killed so many more people.
Holy shit!
We're not helping at all!
How did that even- What?
"Death times 100." Holy shit.
That was more tha 100 people.
Melted!
Melted into eternity.
No explanation needed. This is perfect.
I'm just having a bad day.
Alright, we need to get into our primitive caveman..
mindset. Alright?
Oh, look!
I see a shiny, I pick up the shiny.
And I get an Ether. Thank you.
What- Do you ever wonder like- What do you
think this stuff tastes like?
What do you think an Elixir tastes like?
I feel like- Maybe like- [LAUGHS]
It's green, so my mind immediately went to like..
7-Up.
Loser.
You little baby.
You crying? Little baby.
You gonna cry again?
So, I can only Attack right now?
I believe so. Yes.
We can only do the swipey swipe.
And the choppy chop.
Nothing else.
This is the standoff of the century.
He's winning though. Please!
Anyone.
Yes?
Good guy? Bad guy?
Oh, here we go. Alright.
Say no more.
Okay, I thought that woman was literally naked for a second.
Hello.
That is an- That is a literal butt! [LAUGHS]
"You get AP."
Yeah, you gotta kill things.
"..and learn the ability Cheer. Note that you do not have to-"
Blah, blah, blah, blah.
Oh, my God. There's so much!
"Another tutorial will become available.." Alright, good.
[SIGHS] Switch characters, alright.
Holy shit!
Are you kidding me?
Holy crap, that was so much!
Oh, my sweet lord.
Jesus Christ!
Into the actual ocean though?
You would die.
"Dies on impact"?
Not even that.
He would die from the pressure.
Look how deep he's going!
Okay. [LAUGHS]
Alright.
That was really abrupt.
Ow, fuck!
Oh!
We're about to get..
eaten!
"How hard is it to add a blue color filter to this?"
I don't know.
Does it- It- It doesn't..
actually look like it's underwater now that you mention it.
So, thanks for pointing that out.
We're in- I mean, it's got like, a wavy effect.
I can see what they were trying to do.
This is 9/10 literally unplayable.
Wha- That looks so appetizing.
Oops.
[LAUGHS]
Blitzball has been cancelled.
Effective immediately.
It was literally 10 minutes ago, you liar.
Oh, noo!
Did we..
Did we ruin the space time continuum?
Why am I finding myself doing that in
many games that I play?
They couldn't have made her pants, like..
one tone, like, darker? [LAUGHS]
Okay, but, just for a second..
How does Wakka's hair work?
Yes, I can show off for once!
"Blitzball cream"?
Don't ever say that to me again.
Does he ever actually say, "brother"?
Or are you just making that up?
He- [LAUGHS]
He said it!
I thought you were kidding!
I want to play some frickin' Blitzball, man!
I go where you go.
♪
[GASPS]
Oh, it's the song.
Yo, this song is a fucking bop!
"Odd clothes you got. What land are you from?"
What- Look at what you're wearing!
What-
You're wearing like, nothing!
[LAUGHS]
"One gust of wind.."
Yeah, and she's nude.
I- I guess I can't say.
It's none of my business.
She wants to dress like a baddie,
she wants to dress like a baddie.
Maybe.
He sounds like the narrator in like..
one of those teen, like..
Romcoms.
Oh!
Oh, shit!
Holy shit!
Give it a smooch.
It has boobs.
It has..
Okay.
Clearly a girl.
[CROWD GASPS]
Tori: [MIMICKING GASPS]
Huh!
It's very clearly a girl.
It's got titties.
Ooooo.
Ooooooo!
Left on read.
Ehhhhh.
Mmmmmmm.
Gotta be honest.
He looks so weird.
Wakka..
He's side eyeing me.
He wants me to say something inappropriate.
Hmmmmmm.
She's not really my type.
Okay. [LAUGHS]
Oh, no!
Oh, we picked the right answer.
If we picked the other one,
Wakka was gonna beat the shit out of us.
Oh, that's good.
Might as well treat it like one.
Okay? Just leave-
Just leave it?
You just left it on the side of the road?
Yuna!
Ah!
Oh, I forgot we were playing an RPG.
"Use the Summon command-" And blah, blah, blah.
Alright, someone's acting up. AutoMod do your thing.
Bring down the ban hammer.
"Three hour time out." You're not allowed to chat anymore.
What?
Lulu, you're totally capable.
Don't be talkin' that.
That- No-
Nuh, nuh, no.
No, we believe in..
boss babes here.
Okay? That's already been established.
This is a boss babe channel.
Don't ever..
Don't ever..
come at me with that again-
Oh, she just died. [LAUGHS]
Lulu!
What are you doing, man?
What the hell? Why?
What an asshole.
[GASPS] Oh, slavery, noo!
Oh, he doesn't know what a Chocobo is.
Haven't you ever played a Final Fantasy game before?
Fuck!
So, you're telling me..
Chocobos are less than 1,000 years old?
Like they're some new invention?
If I pull this lever, will they be free?
So, tell me about your dad.
You have a dead dad.
I have a dead dad.
Let's kiss!
Oh, we're going for small talk? Alright.
[TIDUS GIGGLING]
What is wrong with him?
What the hell?
What's so fuckin' funny?
Is it dead? Oh, thank God!
Oh, no. Please tell me it's dead and not like a..
final phase or something?
Oh, it's dead.
Jesus Christ!
That was a little dramatic.
Whoa!
Oh, are they- Are they about to get fucked?
Ohhh.
Oh, no!
Oh, noooo.
That sucks.
Holy shit!
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
This game killed a baby!
♪
