Salut c’est Géraldine.
Welcome to Comme une Française TV, live in
France, feel at home.
Today, we’ll cover precisely the kind of
topic you come to Comme une Française for.
Deep insight on France and French people that
only a local can reveal.
Delivered with kindness and honesty.
Never judgmental.
Today’s video is about “How to frighten
a French person”
Please remember before we start that this
video is here is help you be aware of cultural
differences, not to force you to change who
you are.
Today, I’ll share with you 5 ways to unsettle
a French person.
1.The dreaded hug
In France, people give “la bise”.
Yes, it’s intimate.
Yes faces touch.
Yes it can be scary for you.
But it’s very natural for us.
What French people are afraid of is hugging.
The whole bodies touch.
To us, that’s intimate.
So don’t be shocked if a French person is
unsettled by your hug and freezes.
That’s normal.
We’re not used to hugging at all.
Only couples or children hug.
We don’t even have a word for “hug”.
“Câlin” is close but it has a sexual
meaning too.
If you are comfortable enough in an informal
situation, try to give “la bise” in France.
Or, at least, just say “bonjour”.
But don’t hug a French person.
Especially those who’ve never been to America.
2. Starting an email with a first name
Never start an email with the name of the
person in an informal email.
When I read an email starting with just “Géraldine”,
I feel threatened straight away.
“What have I done?”
In an informal context, ALWAYS start with
a Bonjour / Coucou / Salut…
In a formal context (mainly in a professional
context), you might sometimes write emails
starting without a greeting.
This will usually be when it’s not the first
time you’re writing to the person that the day.
But, Be careful how you choose your words: write
in a non-threatening manner
and remember
to thank the person warmly at the end.
3. Be over enthusiastic in a sales meeting
Here’s some personal advice I gave to a
American freelance friend who needed help
closing sales in Paris.
When I met her the next day, she said it was
one of the best pieces of advice she’s ever had.
I told her “Smile less”.
Why?
Because French people are very afraid of scams
when they buy something.
And people who smile too much when they’re
selling something are perceived as fake.
They think “She’s smiling to hide something
from me”.
Or “She’s so naive she doesn’t know
what she’s doing”
Obviously I don’t mean “stop smiling”
completely, just keep in mind when you’re
closing a deal: if you’re overenthusiastic,
French people will suspect there’s something wrong.
4. Rush along the French friendship scale
I’ve heard many times that French people
are like coconuts while Americans are like
peaches.
A French person’s shell is hard to break
but they’re soft inside.
To win over a French person, your relationship
must grow steadily.
Your trust grows and you become more and more
intimate.
Don’t promise or build anything that won’t
last.
Even if you’re very open and warm on first
encounter, the French person in front of you
will expect the friendship to grow steadily.
We have lots of words for friends.
Because our friendships take time to build
but last forever.
Please check the post “7 types of French
friends” for more info.
5. Not saying hello and goodbye
The French expression for “not saying goodbye”
is “filer à l’anglais” = “leave like
an Englishman”...
Greeting is VERY important in our culture.
When entering a shop, arriving at the office,
meeting a group of friends, it’s vital you
say “hello”.
And when you leave a party, you need to say
“Au revoir” to each person you talked
to during the evening.
And I’m not going to talk about all the
sacred food etiquette.
We’ll cover that in another video.
Et toi ? Your French will ONLY improve if
you put into practice what you’ve learnt
on Comme une Française TV.
Share your experiences by leaving a comment
below this video :
Have you ever heard of those unspoken rules?
Does it explain something about French behaviours
around you?
The comment section is the best place to start
discussions and ask questions!
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Live in France, feel at home. Allez! Salut!
