 
## **Contents**

Title Page

Copyright

Dedication

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

About the Author

Letter from Brenna

Taking Their Second Chance

A Greene Pastures Novella (#1)

Brenna Welles

© 2017 by Brenna Welles

No part of this story may be used, reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the copywrite holder, except in the case of brief quotations embodied within critical reviews and articles.

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer's imagination and have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely coincidental.

To you, dear reader. For give me a chance.

CHAPTER ONE

The bitter cold snaked its way beneath the collar of Jake's old leather jacket, chilling him to the bone. The rain had finally let up after three solid months. They, whoever they were, had named this winter the coldest and wettest one on record in the last thirty-two years. Jake couldn't wait for the corresponding summer drought that everyone was predicting.

But first, calving season.

Dr. Beckett, the local large animal vet, and Morris Rowland, owner and operator of Rowland Ranch, seemed to think the season was upon them already. They said it could be only a week or two out at the most before the first round of calves began to drop. Which meant Jake needed to make arrangements to have his mother cared for while he was too busy at the ranch.

Esther Waller, Jake's mother, had been diagnosed with stage four throat cancer just after Jake's last semester at college began. He had quickly withdrawn from the university and headed straight home, ignoring his mother's protests. Though Esther had many friends in the community that would help her fight this battle, Jake couldn't leave her on her own.

Shortly after coming home, Jake applied for a job back on Rowland Ranch, having worked there off and on throughout his summers as a teenager, up until he graduated. Most of that money had gone toward paying for college. Morris' father had been the owner and operator back then, but Morris and Jake had worked together often. He had been enthusiastic to have Jake back.

Jake knew he owed Morris. Odds were he had heard the rumors and gave Jake the job without a second thought. Jake's mother had decent insurance, but she wasn't able to work. Having this job meant they would be able to eat and keep the lights on at home.

Jake slid into his old but reliable truck and fired it up, more than ready to be home. But tonight, instead of making a quick dinner for the both of them and putting his feet up by the fire, Jake had interviews to conduct.

Calving season was the busiest time for any ranch. The work hours were long and hard, many cowhands only heading home to sleep and grab quick meals in between shifts. The Rowlands had traditionally opened up their large farmhouse so the men could take naps when needed. There would be no time to take care of his mother, take her to her appointments, make her meals. It had taken a long time until his mother agreed to hire a temporary home-care nurse.

Jake had never really appreciated how stubborn his mother could be until that moment.

Pulling into the drive, Jake was surprised to see an unfamiliar car sitting in the driveway. It was an older model compact car, tiny and red with a bumper sticker reminding everyone to support the troops.

A quick glance at the clock on the dash told Jake he was only two minutes late.

Whoever this person is, they were certainly punctual. Which would be important with all the appointments his mother had.

Jake had meant to be home a half-hour ago to do some last minute tidying up before the first applicant arrived. Just as he was about to leave, a couple of the guys asked him to help move some equipment and it had taken them longer than anticipated.

Well, if Jake ended up hiring this one, at least they wouldn't be surprised by the state of the house.

Jake slid out of the truck and jogged to the front door. Turning the knob, he pushed it open, looking down to wipe his feet on the worn welcome mat. He made a mental note to replace it soon.

"I'm home," he called. He didn't expect his mother to call back. The treatment had been harsh, chewing up her throat and making it difficult to talk and eat. Even the skin around her neck looked sun-burnt.

"Welcome home," a soft, lilting voice said.

Jake jerked his head up at the familiar voice.

She looked the same, and yet so very different. She stood by the door, her jacket unbuttoned as though she were in the process of removing it. Her pale, blond hair no longer framed her face in a cute bob, but had grown past her shoulders. Her face looked all at once older and more beautiful than ever, her light blue eyes twinkling the same as they always had before.

"Letti?" Jake said, surprise coloring his tone. He narrowed his eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"Jake," came the soft rasp from the other side of the living room. Immediately, Jake's attention turned to his mother, who managed to give him a stern look and a sharp shake of the head. She sat wrapped in a blanket, her thinning dark hair covered with a hat she had crocheted years ago. She lifted a piece of paper up, gesturing that he should take it. He strode over to her, his long legs eating up the distance.

The name Colette Fletcher stood at the top of the page in bold print. It was her résumé.

Jake's one concession to his mother about hiring a nurse was that she pick the applicants and invite them to an interview. She argued that if she were to let somebody take care of her, she better have the chance to figure out if she'd like them. Jake had agreed, finding himself more than willing to give up that tedious task.

Now, he began to regret that decision.

Jake leveled a stare at his mother before taking a breath and turning back to Colette. "I apologize. I didn't know Mom had invited you. Please, have a seat."

Letti lifted an eyebrow at him before sitting in one of the armchairs. As though only minutes had passed instead of years, he could read her thoughts as clearly as if she had said them aloud.

He doesn't know who he's interviewing?

"Um," Jake began, clearing his throat. "Can I get you any water? Tea?"

"Water would be fine," Letti said, giving him a small smile.

So, that's what their relationship had been reduced to. An offer of water and a smile.

It was his own fault. No point in dwelling on it. The past was in the past.

Jake retreated to the kitchen, washing his hands before grabbing a clean glass and filling it with water. Then he groaned. In his flustered state, he hadn't thought to check on his mother and see if she needed any more water.

"Mom?" Jake called, peering around the corner into the living room. "Need water?"

She shook her head, lifting her water bottle and then pointing to Letti.

Which meant that Letti had gone ahead and refilled her water. Score one for Letti.

Jake ducked back into the kitchen, though the glass of water was already filled. He pulled down another glass and filled it for himself, if for no other reason than to give himself a quick lecture.

This wasn't a competition, nor a continued lover's spat. This was about his mother's well-being. Letti wasn't here to prove anything. She was probably just looking for a job. Nothing personal.

Jake took two big gulps of water before leaving the kitchen. He gave Letti what no doubt amounted to a tight smile and handed a glass to her.

"Thanks for coming. I apologize I'm late," he said, taking a seat beside his mother on the couch.

"Thanks for the invitation," Letti said calmly, taking a sip. "Prepping for calving season?"

Of course Letti would know that Jake was back at Rowland Ranch. This town was small enough that she probably knew the day he decided to come back home.

Swallowing his irritation with another gulp of water, Jake nodded. "It should be starting in the next week or so. If we decide to hire you, you'd need to start immediately. There won't be any issues with that, will there?"

Letti shook her head. "I'm available whenever you need."

"Good." Jake looked at his mother, who sat with a soft smile on her face. Looking at her, he knew she had already decided on Letti. But he needed to make sure, too.

"Tell me about yourself," Jake said. As though he didn't know everything about her.

To her credit, Letti kept the answer professional, no doubt seeing right through Jake's poor attempt at rattling her cage. He learned that soon after Jake had left for Western Washington University, Letti had enrolled at a local community college and earned her certification as a nursing assistant. She explained that she wanted to gain more experience before jumping back in to nursing school.

Another glance at her resume told Jake that Letti worked hard. She had had several home-care positions in the last few months alone, on top of volunteering with the local hospital and hospice care. She had always had a big heart and he was glad to see her put it to good use since he'd been gone.

Jake asked her a couple more questions, mostly pertaining to his mother's needs. He also asked her a few questions Esther had prepared for him to ask, to which his mother grinned in excitement at Letti's answers.

Well. If that didn't just seal the deal.

"Thank you, Letti," Jake said, standing and offering a hand to her. As awkward as it was, he didn't want to appear rude. She shook it, her hand small and light as a feather in his grip, then also offered her hand to Esther, which solidified his own decision. Though he didn't like it.

He was going to hire her.

The rest of the interviews paled by comparison. Two of them showed up late, which automatically disqualified them in Jake's mind. He needed to be sure his mother would make it to her appointments on time and being a few minutes late was unacceptable. The last candidate was nice enough but incredibly boring. And while he knew his mother didn't need any entertaining, he couldn't imagine sticking her with someone she wouldn't find any common ground with.

Jake closed the door on the last person, then rested his forehead against the door.

"You planned that, didn't you?" Jake mumbled.

His mother didn't answer, but when he turned back to look at her, he saw the too-innocent look on her face.

With a heavy sigh, Jake pushed himself away from the door and back to his mother.

"Fine, we'll hire Letti. But I feel like I need to warn you, she is only ever going to be your nurse. What happened between us years ago is over."

Esther rolled her eyes but nodded. Then she yawned.

Looking at the time, Jake sighed again. "Let me heat up some leftovers for you, then you can go to bed, alright?"

Jake heated up some of the leftover casserole from yesterday's dinner, making sure the pieces were small and soft enough that his mother could swallow them. Thoughts of Letti raced through his mind. He wanted to dig deeper than the cautious interview questions he had asked her today. He wanted to know why she went into nursing. Last he knew, she had wanted to be a teacher. He wanted to ask after her big brother, who last he knew had been deployed to Iraq.

His thoughts ran in circles as he ate with his mother on the couch, both of them too tired to relocate to the dining room. Jake had built up a fire in the time before the first late applicant showed up and added a couple of logs to it now. His mother was always cold, not only from the weather, but from the treatment.

"I'll call Letti in the morning," Jake said as he helped his mother into bed. "Ask her to come over tomorrow to go over everything."

"Dinner," Esther rasped. Jake winced.

"Alright. I'll invite her to dinner. What are you making?"

Esther gave Jake a wide grin before she picked up her notebook and pen on the nightstand. This was their game. Too weak to be in the kitchen now, Esther wrote down what she would make if she could. It made Jake's chest warm to see the happiness in his mother's eyes when Jake played along. After all, she had taught him how to cook at a very young age, telling him that one day his future wife would be happier for it.

Once her menu was complete, Esther passed the notebook to Jake, then settled down in the bed, pulling the sheets up close around her.

"Goodnight, Mom," Jake said, leaning over and giving her forehead a kiss. Then he switched off her light and left the room.

Jake kicked off his shoes in his room and grabbed the latest mystery thriller he was slowly working his way through before returning to the living room. He stretched out on the couch, feet toward the fireplace. Then he looked down at his mother's dinner request and let out a loud groan, loud enough for his mother to hear it down the hall.

Chicken parmesan.

Letti's favorite.

CHAPTER TWO

Letti's phone rang just as she was saying her goodbyes to then on-duty nurses. Worried that it might be her brother, Letti rushed out of the hospital doors and answered her phone without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?" she answered, slightly out of breath.

"Hi, Letti. It's Jake."

Letti froze in the middle of the sidewalk, earning a narrowed look from a couple as they split up to walk her. Then she shook herself back into action.

Be a professional!

"Jake, hi," Letti said in a rush, then winced. "Um. Thanks for giving me a call. How can I help you?"

Better.

"We would like to offer you the job, if you're still willing," Jake said. Letti could hear the hesitant tone in his voice. Meaning he didn't actually want to hire her, but he would. For his mother.

Did she want to work for them?

She hadn't known who she sent her résumé to when she had applied for the job posting online. The job board didn't provide any personal information, which she understood and appreciated because that would compromise the patient's privacy. But when Esther had replied and given them her address and phone number, Letti had fretted over going through with it.

She had fretted long enough that she had to show up or offend Esther by not showing. It had been nice to see Esther after all this time, though her heart broke at Esther's thin frame, her pale skin, the burns on her neck due to the radiation treatments.

She had known then that she would take the job. For Esther. Jake would be busy with calving season. It would be easy enough to avoid him.

"Letti?" Jake's voice sounded distant over the phone.

"Sorry," Letti said quickly. "Yes, I'm still willing. When can I start?"

Lord, please help me.

"Would you be able to come over tonight and I'll walk you through everything? Paid, of course. And Mom insisted I feed you."

Letti smiled before she could stop herself. That was just like Esther. "Sure. I can do that. Six o'clock okay for you?"

"Yeah, as long as you don't mind me cooking while you're there."

"I'll see you then."

They hung up and Letti did a little two-step right there on the sidewalk. Sure, her new employer was her ex-boyfriend, but she had a job. A job that would not only make her résumé look better, but it would also help a dear friend of hers.

She couldn't wait to start.

Finding a job had proven difficult since she graduated with her certification. She had been in the final running for a job at OHSU Hospital down in Portland, but the job had gone to another candidate, as they had more experience on their résumé. The HR recruiter had suggested Letti gain more experience in the meantime and promised she would call if they had another opening. Letti had taken her advice to heart and loaded up her free hours with as much volunteer experience as she could, though she couldn't allow herself to hope that the HR recruiter would call.

She would have to shift her volunteer hours around for this new job. The hospital desperately needed volunteers during the night shifts, as they didn't have enough volunteers willing to work so late. Letti would volunteer through the night, then she went straight to her volunteer shift at the hospice care center off of Main. She had started to volunteer there years ago, right after Jake had left, feeling the need to answer a call she didn't know she had been missing.

That's what had started her on this journey. After Jake had left, her grandmother had entered hospice care, Letti's parents having abandoned Letti and her brother to their grandmother's care long ago. Letti never knew what happened to her parents.

Letti had visited her grandmother as often as she could, her shift at the grocery store an interruption until she could go back and see her grandmother. While she was there, Letti had visited with many of the patients, learning about their lives, the good times and the bad. In the end, it had been her grandmother and several of the nurses in the facility that had convinced Letti to earn her certification as a nursing assistant.

And here she was, years later, with a job more rewarding than she could have ever imagined. When her brother had returned home from Iraq, injured but alive, Letti had been with him through every step of the way, helping learn how to walk again, how to live again.

Letti pulled into the parking lot of the hospice building and nearly skipped to the entrance.

"You got the job?" Becca called from the front desk.

"Yup!"

A chorus of cheers came from the back, behind the main doors. Becca buzzed her through and Letti was enveloped with hugs.

Her shift at the hospice building went by quickly, Letti visiting with as many people as she could. When she yawned one time too many, one of the nurses took pity on her and told her she should head on home and take a nap before her new job tonight.

With a round of farewells, Letti headed home. Her brother would be awake now, but he was pretty good about keeping quiet so Letti could sleep during the day.

After Daniel had come back home, the easiest thing had been that he move in with Letti. In truth, Dan had been Letti's first home-care patient, though she didn't think of him in that way at all. She had wanted to help her brother.

"I'm home," she called as she stepped into the small, two bedroom rambler she had inherited from her grandmother. Luckily, they didn't have to share a bathroom, Letti's room having a tiny en-suite. But she did petition to use the bathtub in Dan's bathroom every so often.

They had painted the house a light sage green just last summer when Dan felt strong enough to be able to do some work around the house. They had had a long talk, and Dan knew he didn't need to do anything in return for what Letti had done for him, that Letti didn't expect that of him, but it still made him feel better about everything. So Letti allowed it.

"Back here," Dan called. His voice sounded faint, like it was coming from the beneath the house.

Walking through the living room, Letti placed her purse on the small entryway table before walking around the corner and into the kitchen. Dan wasn't there, so she kept walking back, passed the pantry and into the mudroom.

"What's this?" she asked, watching Dan wrestle a dryer hose. Gone were the washer and dryer that were old when their grandmother used them. In their place stood two, very tall, cherry red machines. "Dan?" she prodded when he didn't answer.

"Washer broke again," he said.

"Did it break on its own or did you break it?" Letti asked.

Dan have her a quick, mischievous smile. "Such faith you have in me," he teased.

"Dan," she said, a hint of warning in her voice.

Dan sighed. "It really did break. And I was tired of fixing it. Besides, your birthday is coming up."

"In August. It's March."

"It's coming up," Dan repeated. He finished attaching the dryer hose and straightened, turning to face Letti. "A thank you wouldn't go unappreciated."

Letti let out a frustrated sigh, closing her eyes and counting to ten. It helped a little. "Thank you," she gritted out.

"Feeling it," Dan said, brushing past her and into the kitchen-dining room combo.

"Dan," Letti called and rushed after him, already feeling like a heel. "Really. Thank you. I just..." She took another breath. "I was going to take care of it."

"And now you don't have to."

"It's too much!" Letti nearly shouted. Then lowered her voice. "I can take care of these things myself, you know."

Dan turned. "I know you can. You can do anything when you set your mind to it. Even get your stubborn brother walking again. Just let me do this. Okay?"

Letti stared at her brother. The argument was an old one. Why couldn't she just let it go?

It was pride. Her own pride at being independent, and making a life for herself. A need to prove that she never needed her parents. Never needed anybody.

Letti deflated and nodded her head. "I'm sorry. You're right. Thank you, really." Letti glanced back toward the machines, then grinned at her brother. "They're gorgeous. I actually can't wait to do laundry now."

"Good, 'cause I got a pile for you in my room," Dan said with a slight upturn of his lips.

Letti shook her head at him, but laughed.

"I'm heading to bed," she said, walking down the short, narrow hallway to her bedroom. "I got the job. I start tonight."

"Wait a minute!" Dan followed her down the hallway. "The job with Jake's mom?"

Letti nodded, putting down her work backpack, filled with an extra pair of scrubs and her lunch box, and shrugging off her jacket. She laid it over the arm of the small chair next to her tall, white dresser.

"It'll be fine," she said, turning to face Dan. "We're adults. His mother needs help and clearly she wants me to be the one to help her. And it'll look great on my résumé. And let's face it. I need the income right now."

"You're working yourself too much," Dan protested. "Volunteering at the hospice, the hospital, the grocery store on weekends. Too much."

"It's temporary," Letti said, reminding both her brother and herself. "Gotta work hard to play hard, right? And besides, I'm going to shift my volunteer hours and grocery hours to take better care of Esther. It'll all work out."

Dan sighed. "Fine. Just, watch out for yourself, alright? A sick nurse is a useless nurse." He turned and walked back down the hall.

"I'm not a nurse yet. And I don't get sick!" she called after him. Shutting her door, Letti got ready for bed, slipping into a pair of flannel pajamas and washing her face.

She fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

CHAPTER THREE

Letti pulled into the driveway at the same time as Jake later that evening. She knew he was working longer hours to prep for calving season, and wondered just how tired he would be.

Maybe she should offer to cook. After all, he was paying her to be here.

"Good evening," she greeted, lifting a hand. "How was your day?"

Jake's eyes narrowed at her. "It was fine," he said, tone hard. Defensive.

Letti nearly stepped back before she decided that this kind of behavior from either of them wasn't going to help Esther.

"Before we go any further," Letti snapped, taking a couple of steps and stopping right in front of him, "we need to talk."

Jake's eyebrows lifted, but her position forced his attention all on her and that's what she wanted. Then he crossed his arms over his chest.

"I know that our past might make this situation a bit... awkward," she said. Jake snorted and she narrowed her eyes at him. "But this isn't about us, is it?"

At that, Jake's demeanor changed. He lowered his arms and met her eyes without reservation, all trace of surliness gone. The change was so drastic, Letti's jaw nearly dropped in surprise. Instead, she counted it as a win and continued.

"Your mom needs both of our help. And we can't really do that until we bury the hatchet. So," Letti stuck out her hand. "Hatchet buried. How about you?"

Jake hesitated, giving Letti a considering look. Then he stuck out his own hand and shook hers. "Hatchet buried."

"Good. Let's go inside. It's freezing." Letti paused at the door, shooting Jake a look over her shoulder. "You build a fire, I make dinner." Her tone left no room for discussion.

They entered the house, Esther beaming at the two of them as though Christmas had come early. Letti realized she might have heard their little conversation outside.

"Hi, Esther," Letti said, shrugging off her jacket. When the weight of it disappeared, Letti looked back, surprised to see Jake taking it from her and hanging it up on the tiny coat rack near the front door.

Esther waved when Letti turned back. The couch she sat on was an old, overstuffed thing with a garish pattern that had been in the family for years. Crocheted blankets were draped across the back of it and over Esther's lap, a kaleidoscope of different colors. Maybe Letti would finally get the chance to learn how to crochet. Esther had tried to teach her the entire time Letti and Jake had been together.

"Jake's going to build the fire and I'll get started on dinner," Letti said. When Esther began to frown and shake her head, Letti just smiled. "It's alright. Jake's had a long day and I just woke up from a nap."

Esther didn't have a choice but to give a reluctant nod, shooting her son a disgruntled look. Letti bit her lower lip to keep the laughter to herself.

Turning to Jake, she asked, "What's for dinner?"

"Chicken Parmesan," Jake said before he turned on his heel and walked toward the back. No doubt to gather firewood.

Cautious delight filled her. There was no way that Jake remembered that was her favorite.

A little while later, a fire roared in the hearth and Letti slid the pan of chicken into the oven. With one look from Esther, Jake made his way into the kitchen to grab plates and silverware. Letti grabbed glasses from the cupboard and filled them with water before following him into the dining room.

"How's the ranch treating you?" she asked, hoping Jake wouldn't give her the silent treatment all evening. They had agreed to leave their past behind them, but they hadn't agreed to be friendly with one another.

"It's fine," Jake said. After a pause, he seemed to steal himself and added, "Morris is doing a good job with the place. We're getting ready for the auction at the Fair and calving season. Some of the heavies look like they might drop any day now."

"Are you going to be riding in the rodeo this year?" she asked. She always loved to watch him when they were younger, though some of his antics had been designed to scare her, she was sure of it.

"Yeah, I was planning on it. If I win anything, that would help go toward some of these medical bills," he said with a shrug.

"I'm sure you will," Letti said.

The egg timer rang and Letti realized she had done nothing but watch Jake set the table. Feeling a flush steal its way up her neck, Letti rushed back into the kitchen and took the chicken out of the oven.

The three of them settled down to dinner after that, with Jake dishing up everybody's plates. She had also taken the time to chop up a fresh salad, though she knew it might be hard for Esther to swallow. Esther needed all the vitamins she could get.

"Tell you what," Letti said to Esther. "I know some really good green smoothie recipes. I'll swing by the store and make sure we have everything on hand for you to try some of them. That sound good?"

Esther gave Letti a smile and a nod before taking a small bite of chicken, coated liberally with marinara sauce.

"Green smoothie?" Jake said, skeptical even as he took a large bite of salad.

"They're good. And an easy way to get all your vitamins. I'll make you one." Letti smiled at him in challenge.

Jake remained silent at that, shoveling food in as though he believed somebody would come out of nowhere and take his plate away from him.

They ate in silence for a while, focused on the food. Letti kept an eye on Esther, making sure she was able to get the food down past her damaged throat. She also tried to keep her eyes off of Jake, though that proved to be harder to do.

He had filled out over the years. His shoulders had become broader, muscles piling on top of one another. She was sure he had grown another inch or two, though she couldn't ask something so personal. His rich, dark hair was cropped close enough to stay out of his eyes, which were still a beautiful hazel. She remembered getting lost in all the different colors she could find in them.

It was Esther's tap on the table that brought Letti out of her thoughts. When she turned to Esther, she noticed the pad of paper and a pen set in the space between them.

How's your brother?

Letti smiled. "Dan is doing just fine," she said. "He bought me the most beautiful washer and dryer set today. He's determined to fix up the place though he really doesn't have to."

Jake's head snapped up at that, eyes narrowed, though he didn't say anything.

"He was honorably discharged not too long ago," she said, more for Jake's benefit. "His recovery is going well. His leg is doing much better now," she said to Esther.

Esther smiled and nodded.

"What happened to his leg?" Jake asked, sitting back now that his plate was clear. Not even a drop of sauce remained.

"IED. Shrapnel tore it up. Lots of scar tissue and he needed a plate along the femur to help it heal. But he hardly limps anymore."

Jake looked as though he had just swallowed a lemon.

"Sorry," Letti added. "That's not exactly polite dinner conversation. And I'm sure Dan would be mortified if he knew I was discussing his leg with you both."

"No, it's fine," Jake said, just as his mother shook her head. "I'll have to meet him again. What does he do now?"

"He's working in construction. Refurbishing old houses and the like. Really, anything he can get his hands on."

"Seems smart," Jake said with a nod. "Lots of places around here need it."

The conversation waned back into silence. Once Esther finished, Letti stood and gathered the plates, taking them to the sink. She filled the sink with hot, soapy water, grateful for a minute to just breathe.

"You're not doing the dishes."

Startled, Letti turned back to Jake. "I'm just getting them in to soak. The marinara doesn't come off easy if you let it dry."

Jake nodded. "When you're ready, let's go over what you'll be responsible for."

"Of course," she said, switching off the water and drying her hands on a nearby dish towel.

Jake took her on a tour of the house, showing her his mother's room and bathroom, as well as where he kept extra linens. "Mom knows where everything is, of course. This is just in case she's at an appointment or asleep."

"Got it."

"I'd like it if you could stay with her during her appointments," Jake added, as though an afterthought. "Sometimes they run long, but I know she would appreciate the company."

"That's the plan," Letti said. She couldn't imagine leaving Esther to her treatment all by herself. "I'll bring cards."

"She likes Gin Rummy," he said with a quick smile. Letti's heart jumped.

Letti backed up a few steps, bumping right up against the wall of the narrow hallway. A picture crashed to the floor.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Letti said, kneeling down to pick it up. The glass had shattered. Letti began to pick up some of the bigger pieces, ignoring the sharp sting to one of her fingers that let her know she cut herself. "I'll replace it, I promise. Vacuum?"

"Uh, yeah." Jake rushed to the end of the hallway and pulled a vacuum out of the closet.

The picture had been one of Jake and his parents, a formal style portrait done when Jake must have been around five years old. He looked adorable in his little pressed pantsuit, though his disgruntled look begged to differ.

The two of them cleaned the mess up, Jake vacuuming while Letti dumped the glass shards in the garbage. She placed the picture on the counter, as she went to rinse her cut in the sink.

"I'm sorry about your picture frame," Letti said to Esther, wrapping her finger with a paper towel to stop the bleeding. "I'll get you a new one tomorrow, I promise." Dipping down below the sink, Letti searched for a first-aid kit. When she didn't find one, she frowned and stood back up. "Esther, do you have a first-aid--"

"You cut yourself," Jake interrupted.

"Just a little," she said. Before she could move, Jake had reached out and grabbed her hand, carefully removing the paper towel. As soon as he did, blood welled in the small cut on the pad of her finger. He wrapped it again, meeting Letti's eyes. "I'll get a Band-Aid."

Letti stood in the kitchen, holding her finger, too stunned to move. It was a cut finger, nothing more. Why did she feel as though the world had shifted on its axis?

Jake returned a moment later with the Band-Aid and some ointment. He dressed the wound, ignoring Letti's protests. She stood there, hot and cold chills racing up the arm that Jake held.

"Can you start tomorrow?" Jake asked. "Esther has an appointment and I need to help Morris on the ranch."

"Sure," Letti said, grateful that they could talk work again. She did some mental schedule shifting. She'd have to call the hospice crew, see if she could shift her volunteer hours to the later part of the afternoon/evening. "What time?"

"Her appointment is at ten."

"Great. I'll be here by nine, help her eat something before we go."

"Great."

They stood awkwardly in front of each other. Letti realized Jake had finished bandaging her hand, holding it in his. She pulled her hand back, and Jake dropped it as soon as he realized what he had done.

"I better get going," Letti said, her words not more than a soft breath. "Unless there's anything else you need to go over with me?"

Jake shook his head, then turned and strode out of the kitchen. Letti sucked in a deep breath as she heard Jake ask his mother if she needed to talk to Letti about anything important.

Letti squared her shoulders and left the kitchen, determined to keep her professionalism gathered around her like a cloak. She would not let Jake get to her.

Esther gave Letti a little wave and a smile, conveying her gratitude with facial gestures. Letti's heart warmed.

"I'll see you in the morning," she said as she donned her coat. Then she looked at Jake. "Thank you."

She didn't have to explain that the thank you was more than a simple thank you for dinner. It was a thank you for the job. A thank you for putting aside their past and letting her work with his mother. A thank you for bandaging the cut on her finger.

Jake gave her that soft and swift smile once more. It made her heart jump again, filling Letti with frustration.

"Goodnight," he said. "Drive safe."

Letti shut the door behind her and exhaled long and slow.

She could do this. She could help Esther and keep her emotions under control. She had to.

Lord, help me, please.

CHAPTER FOUR

Jake led the horse along the perimeter of the herd, keeping an eye out for any signs of distress. So far, the heavies this year seemed to be holding their own, which was a good sign. That meant it would be a good calving season, barring a few exceptions. They couldn't win them all.

The days had grown longer, both in daylight and in labor hours. Now that Jake didn't have to take as much time off to help his mother with her appointments and to make sure she ate, he poured himself into his work. It was meditative, being out on the land, herding cattle, distributing hay where needed. It had been a long, cold, and wet winter. It was still cold. But Jake didn't feel the bite of the wind as he rode on, letting the work warm him.

It had been a couple of weeks since he'd hired Letti. In that time, Letti had taken over caring for his mother, taking her to appointments, feeding her, bathing her when she was too tired and sick to move on her own. It broke Jake's heart whenever he arrived home to learn his mother had gone to bed early due to feeling so weak. Letti always made an extra plate of dinner for him when he came home, and had a lunch prepared for him to take the next day. That wasn't a part of the agreement at all, but Jake found himself too grateful at the gesture to complain.

He'd even grown to like her green smoothies in the morning.

It seemed Letti had made it her job to take care of both of them.

Jake tried to remain aloof, distant. He left the house as soon as Letti handed off his green smoothie in the morning. He didn't talk much in the evenings other than to hear Letti's daily report. They didn't talk about anything other than his mother's well-being. Letti was a thorough nurse and made sure Jake was always up to date regarding his mother's treatment.

As reluctant as he was to admit, his mother had made the perfect choice with her.

"Jake," Morris' voice carried over the wind. The sun had come out that afternoon, warming the air. Jake shed his jacket hours ago.

Lifting a hand up, Jake made one last check on the herd as he rode over.

"Hey, boss," Jake greeted, sliding off the horse. "What's up?"

Shaking his head, Morris ran a hand through his long hair. "Paige called. She needs me to pick up a visitor at the airport." Morris gave a long, frustrated sigh. "Her half-sister. Allison something-or-other. Can you believe that?"

Jake's jaw dropped. He had heard rumors circling around the ranch about a daughter Max Greene discovered he had before he met Eleanor, but Jake had been too polite to confirm if the rumors were true. Max Greene was held in the highest regard by many in the community, and it was a general consensus that if Max had known about the daughter, he would have done right by her.

"What do you need me to do?" Jake asked, shoving aside his curiosity. He didn't have time for that. Morris called him over for a reason, and that reason was to work.

"Cam's on his way to Greene Pastures. Sounds like the new foal is on its way. I asked Cam if he could stop by when he's done, check out the sprain in Mac's leg and see how it's doing. See anything going on in the herd?" Morris jerked his head toward the herd that Jake had been rounding up.

"Nah, looks good out there," Jake said. "I can have Cam take a look though, if you'd like."

Morris shook his head. "I trust you. I'm sure it's fine. This will be the first calving season without Dad here."

Jake nodded. Morris didn't have to say anything more. "I'll do my best when the time comes."

"I have no doubt." Morris clapped Jake on the shoulder. "Hey, you still planning on riding in the rodeo next weekend?"

Jake grinned. "As long as my boss doesn't mind a little moonlighting on the side."

Morris laughed. "I'll be there to cheer you on. How's your mother?"

"She's seen better days," Jake said, giving a half-hearted shrug. He hated giving people updates. They weren't always good, but were always met with prayers and offers of help. "The chemo is really affecting her. She's scheduled for another PET scan in a couple of weeks to see if the tumor has gone down at all."

"I'll keep praying for her. And you. You let me know if you need any help." Morris squeezed his arm.

"Will do. We hired Letti Fletcher to take care of her," Jake said, clearing his throat. "She's working out really well."

"That's good! I've heard great things about her. She really helped her brother when he came home from Iraq." Morris' brows drew together. "Say, didn't you two--"

Jake nodded, cutting Morris off. "It was a long time ago. We've put it behind us."

"Good. Well. Let me know if you need anything." Morris nodded and began to walk away. "Oh, one more thing. Would you make sure Kyle gets those stalls mucked this afternoon? I know he's busy, but they need doing."

"You got it." Jake lifted a hand in a wave.

Jake arrived home later than normal that evening. Morris had been late getting back to the ranch and Jake didn't feel comfortable leaving without tying in with Morris. Morris felt bad about the whole thing and told Jake to take the next morning off, but Jake waved it away. He had spent the time cleaning up the tack room and making sure the stalls were mucked. Kyle had done a pretty decent job, but Jake double checked every one just to pass the time.

Weary, Jake pushed the front door open and shut it behind him, leaning heavily against it. A lamp near the couch had been left on, the fire smoldering in the hearth. The kitchen and dining room were dark, except the oven light which told Jake he had a meal waiting for him inside, still warm. Jake frowned. What time was it?

"Welcome home," a soft voice said from the couch. Jolting to awareness, Jake spun and peered into the dim lighting. Curled up beneath one of his mother's crocheted blankets was Letti.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. It came out as an accusation and he winced.

"Just making sure your mom was doing alright. It was a bad night, but she seems to be sleeping well now." Letti shoved the blanket off of her and stood from the couch. Her hair was mused from resting against the pillows. Jake wanted more than anything to reach out and smooth it for her. He watched as she folded the afghan and placed it over the back of the couch, as though she had never moved it.

"I'm sorry, I'm late. I should have called."

Letti waved a hand in the air. "No worries. I called the hospice and they were fine with me not coming in tonight."

"The hospice?" he asked, confused.

"I volunteer there," she said, bending over and slipping her shoes back on her feet. They looked worn and tattered.

"Oh," Jake said, feeling a little stupid. Of course she was a volunteer. It had said so on her résumé. It also said she was a volunteer at the hospital. "Are you still volunteering at the hospital, too?"

Letti nodded, then looked up at Jake, brow furrowed. "I'm perfectly capable of maintaining my schedule, if that's what you're worried about," she said, voice low.

Jake raised his hands up in surrender. "I didn't mean to--" He cut himself off. What could he say? That he was concerned about her well-being?

He just wanted to make sure she wouldn't be too exhausted to care for his mother.

Even now, he could see the dark circles under her eyes. She was tired.

"I should let you go," he said. When Letti stiffened, he added, "Home. Go home."

Letti relaxed, rubbing a hand over her face and her hair, smoothing it down. "Sorry. I get enough of a lecture from my brother most days."

"I can understand why." Jake shrugged his jacket off and hung it up, taking a moment to look at Letti's. It looked old, but warm. "I really appreciate all you're doing for my mother," he said, turning back to her.

"She's great," Letti said, a natural, happy smile spreading across her face. "She's strong. I know you worry, but she's actually holding her own very well given the circumstances. She beat me at Gin Rummy this afternoon. And we put a puzzle together. We've also decided how we're going to remodel your whole house."

Jake laughed. "You've been busy, I see."

Letti grinned up at him. For a moment, just a moment, he saw the sweet young girl he had fallen in love with all those years ago.

Before he could think better of it, Jake leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers.

Letti's sharp gasp felt like a bucket of ice water over his head. Jumping back, Jake ran into the coat rack, knocking it over with a clatter.

"I'm so sorry--"

"Jake, I--"

They stood there, staring at each other. The coat rack came to rest across the entryway, Letti's coat a pile on the floor.

Jake wrenched his eyes from Letti's, embarrassment caught in his chest. He bent to straighten the coat rack, picking up Letti's jacket and passing it to her. He tried his best to avoid her gaze.

Clearing his throat, Jake said, "That shouldn't have happened. It was very unprofessional of me and I apologize. I hope this won't affect your working for my mother."

"Of course not," Letti said, her voice small. "I need to go."

It was then that Jake realized he stood in front of the door. Turning quickly, he pulled it open and allowed Letti to leave.

"Goodnight," he said.

"'Night."

Closing the door behind her, Jake raised a shaky hand to his face.

What have I done?

CHAPTER FIVE

"Are you alright?"

Letti jerked out of her stupor, looking up from the steady drip of coffee into her pot. Another gift from Dan. This one had been completely unnecessary, the old one she had purchased from the thrift shop having worked just fine for years.

"Yeah, fine," she said, reaching into the cabinet for a travel coffee mug, hoping to distract Dan from what she had been doing. "What are you doing up so early?"

"Couldn't sleep." Dan shrugged, then reached over her for another mug. "New job. You know how it is."

Letti nodded adding a splash of creamer to her mug before pouring the coffee in. She twisted the top on the mug and grabbed her purse and keys.

"I gotta get going. You're alright for groceries and things?" she asked.

Dan rolled his eyes. "I'm not an invalid anymore, sis. I got this." Then he blocked her hasty exit. "You gonna tell me what's wrong?"

Letti shook her head, pasting on a fake smile. "It's nothing. Promise. I gotta go."

Dan leveled his sharp blue eyes at her. "So tell me what's wrong and I'll let you go."

Letti knew better than to withhold information from her brother. Especially if he felt like something was wrong. With an exasperated sigh, Letti glared at him.

"Jake kissed me last night. On accident, I think. Old habit or something," she shrugged, her eyebrows lowered into a frown. She bit her lip, remembering the slight graze of his lips against hers. It had been sharper, more intense than she remembered it being before. But that could be because memories faded, or that she had been taken so completely unaware by the gesture.

"That no-good--" Dan growled, already turning on a heel and marching for the door.

"Dan! Stop!" Letti raced after Dan, grabbing one bulging bicep as he muscled his way to the door. "Where are you going to go dressed in your pajamas at three in the morning?" she asked.

The wind leaving his sails, Dan stopped in the living room, glaring at the front door. A muscle in his cheek twitched at irregular intervals. Until that moment, Letti hadn't realized that her brother could really hurt someone if he wished it.

Their mother had raised them better than that.

"Dan," Letti said gently, gaining his attention. "It's nothing. Just caught me off guard. He apologized, and that was that. I'm not hurt."

She didn't quite believe that herself, but she hoped her brother would.

After a few moments, Dan nodded and stepped back, loosening Letti's hold on his arm. Then his gaze captured hers.

"You tell me if he does anything like that again, got it?" He left no room for argument.

Letti nodded. Then she turned on her heel and headed for the front door.

"Love you," she said. "Have a good day. Good luck with the new job."

"Love you, too," he muttered as the door closed behind her.

Letti sucked in the chilly early morning air. Frustration and gratitude warred within her. She knew her brother wouldn't just let it go, but she also felt happy that he felt so protective of her. She didn't know what she had done to deserve such a brother, but she wouldn't trade him for the world.

Sliding into her car, Letti tried and failed to push the events of last night from her mind. She had fallen asleep on Jake's couch, the heat from the fireplace proving to be too much for her. She had felt terrible for cancelling her volunteer hours at the hospice, though they had understood. She had worried for Jake, wondered what had kept him out so late. Had something happened at the ranch? Was he injured but unable to call? She had busied herself with building and tending a fire. Even if that had been the case, she knew Morris would have called.

When Jake had arrived, Letti had been so overwhelmed with relief and happiness to see him, she had allowed herself to be a little too close, a little too friendly. And that had backfired tremendously.

She didn't know how she could face him again. How she could face Esther! She had promised herself that this wouldn't happen again, that she wouldn't allow herself to feel this way about Jake ever again.

After all, he was the one who left her behind, who had shattered her heart.

Shaking herself, Letti put the car into gear and backed out of the driveway.

It was already shaping up to be a long day.

__________

Letti let herself into the house after a quick knock with the keys Jake gave her weeks ago.

When she opened the door, she found Esther already sitting up on the couch near the fireplace, a new fire burning warm and bright. With Esther's weight loss from the treatment, everybody tried to keep the house as warm as possible.

Jake was nowhere to be seen.

Turning to look over her shoulder, Letti noticed his truck still in the drive, so he couldn't have left for work yet.

"Good morning, Esther," she said as she entered and closed the door behind her.

Esther waved as Letti slipped her jacket off. One of the patients at the hospital hadn't been the biggest fan of their food that morning and had taken the opportunity of showing their displeasure by spilling most of its contents all over Letti's sweater.

At Esther's raised eyebrows and gesturing to Letti's sweater, Letti shrugged. "Unhappy patient at the hospital. Didn't have time to get changed before coming here."

Jake walked into the living room from the hallway, stopping dead in his tracks at the sight of Letti. Letti willed herself not to blush at her haphazard appearance, and at the memory of their kiss last night.

"What happened?" Jake asked.

"Unhappy patient at the hospital," she repeated, turning away to hang her jacket. She couldn't face him. Call her a coward.

When she turned back, Jake had disappeared again.

Frowning, Letti headed toward the kitchen. "Hungry?" she asked, looking at Esther. Esther rolled her eyes. They had been through this song and dance before. Esther was never hungry anymore, always in too much pain, but Letti insisted she eat.

Pulling out the ingredients for a smoothie and some scrambled eggs, Letti began to mix everything up. When Jake entered the kitchen holding a rolled up bundle, Letti lifted her eyebrow at him.

"You can wear this while you wash your sweater, if you'd like," Jake said, placing the item on the counter and walking out of the kitchen again.

Letti eyed the object before picking it up and shaking it out. It was one of his sweatshirts from Western Washington University. The sight of it stabbed at her heart, and yet warmed it all the same. Jake wanted to make sure she wasn't uncomfortable. And wearing his sweatshirt was something she had always done while they had been together.

Unable to stop herself, Letti buried her face in the cloth and inhaled. It smelled like him. There was the fresh scent of laundry detergent, but an underlying fragrance that was all Jake. Letti pulled it away before she folded it back up and placed it on the counter. She needed to make sure Jake ate before he ran off to work.

Jake inhaled his eggs and smoothie before kissing his mother goodbye and leaving. As soon as the door shut behind him, Letti let out a sigh and dipped her head toward the sink, where she had been washing up the morning's dishes.

When she looked up, Letti gasped at the sight of Esther standing just inside the kitchen, a curious look on her face.

"Oh goodness, you scared me," Letti said, raising her hands to her frantically beating chest. "Are you alright? Do you need something?"

Esther looked pointedly at the front door, then lifted her notepad to Letti.

What happened?

A blush stole across Letti's neck and face. Unable to hide her mortification, Letti groaned.

"How did you find out?"

Jake. He could never hide anything from me. And you looked like you were sneaking in somewhere you didn't belong this morning.

Letti narrowed her eyes at Esther. "You're too observant for your own good."

Esther merely raised her eyebrows, a corner of her lips turning up.

"Come on, let's go sit. I'll make some tea."

Letti knew she was stalling, but Esther allowed her the temporary distraction.

How was she supposed to tell Jake's mother that he had kissed her? Would she lose her job?

When she couldn't stall any longer, Letti gathered the teapot and cups onto a tray and brought them to the living room. She set them on the coffee table, avoiding Esther's gaze. Then she busied herself with pouring the tea and asking Esther if she'd like milk and sugar. When Esther reached out and took her cup without a word and doctored it up herself, Letti sat back on the couch, her own cup untouched.

Esther passed over her notepad before Letti could decide what she should say.

Don't be afraid.

It reminded her of a verse in Isaiah. All at once, Letti relaxed, bolstered by the knowledge that God was with her.

"Jake kissed me last night," she said, her shoulders slumping. "I don't think he meant anything by it. It took us both by surprise." At a loss, Letti leaned forward to pour her own cup of tea.

Esther had a soft, pleased smile on her face when she pushed her notepad back over to Letti.

About time.

Letti inhaled her tea and began to cough. Gasping, Letti set her cup down before turning an incredulous look back to Esther.

"What are you talking about?"

Esther wrote while Letti watched. Communicating this way was a challenge for Esther, but the two of them had found a rhythm over the past couple of weeks. Letti found she didn't mind waiting for Esther to form her responses, which made things easier for the both of them.

Call me a sentimental old woman, but I know love when I see it.

Letti remained silent as shock poured through her, chilling her. She took another sip of her tea. It warmed her on the way down, though she felt tight with tension.

Could she still be in love with Jake? After all this time and their separation? Sure, she heard that people never forget their first love, but was what she felt something more? She had never so much as looked at another man since Jake left for college, too wrapped up with her own life and family to bother. Or so she had convinced herself. Was the truth simply that she didn't want to look?

Letti was honest enough with herself to admit that it might have been.

"You can't know if he feels that way for me," she said, her voice as soft as a whisper. "I hope you know that's not why I came back here to help you."

Esther nodded as she began to write.

I know, dear. But believe me when I say Jake has been lost without you.

Letti shook her head, refusing to believe it. Jake had his head on straight. He went to college. He had a steady job at Rowland Ranch to take care of his mother. He had his priorities straight and was a responsible man.

Esther pushed the notepad to her again.

He's not living. He's working and sleeping. He floats from one place to the other. The fact that he kissed you, even if you think it didn't mean anything, is his way of showing that he needs you.

Letti stared into her cup. Esther brought up a good point. Letti hadn't even seen Jake in town before she came to work for him. She never knew him to do anything other than work on the ranch and then come home.

But that wasn't Letti's responsibility. Letti wouldn't force Jake to do anything if he didn't want to.

"I understand your concerns as a mother," Letti said, ignoring Esther's frown. "But I think we both need to let things be. If Jake has an issue, he should be the one to say so, don't you think?"

Esther pursed her lips, but then gave a reluctant nod. She scribbled on the notepad.

You're already better for him than either of you realize.

Letti smiled and sipped her tea.

"I'm just glad you didn't fire me." Esther gave a silent laugh.

CHAPTER SIX

Jake brushed his horse, Duke, checking to make sure they were both ready for the show they were about to perform. This was the first of the three events he planned on participating in today. Nerves wracked him. It had been a long time since he had been in the saddle as part of the rodeo show.

Not that he hadn't been practicing. Morris had been gracious enough to allow Jake to borrow one Duke and start practicing those skills that had rusted over the years. The rope had felt both foreign and familiar in his hands, the sharp moves and exercises even more so with a new horse.

Winning anything would be a bonus.

He couldn't distract himself now with thoughts of the medical bills or his mother's health. Though, that seemed to be improving at least. Having Letti with her certainly helped. He needed to check in with Letti and see when the next PET scan would be.

He hoped it would be good news.

Shaking himself, Jake turned to grab the blanket and saddle from the lip of the gate. He swung them on, Duke shifting beneath them.

"Shh," Jake said, as much to himself as to the horse. "We're just having a little fun today. That's all."

"Well, if it isn't Jake Waller."

Jake froze for a moment before forcing himself to relax and pretend like the man behind him didn't affect him. Then he turned.

"And you're Chad, right? Chad..." Jake snapped his fingers to himself, as though trying to remember. "Henderson."

Chad's eyes narrowed, though they were small to begin with. He stood tall and thin, a black cowboy hat atop his lanky frame. He had worked hard to become a traveling favorite. They had been bitter rivals back in the day when Jake competed.

"What's an old guy like you doing back in the ring?" Chad asked, spitting off to the side. Jake wrinkled his nose is disgust.

"Just here for old time's sake, don't worry. I'm not gonna be joining the circuit anytime soon." Jake turned back to the horse, adjusting the blanket and saddle just so he wouldn't have to look at Chad. He hoped the man would take the hint and leave, but Chad had always been a bit thick in that regard.

"Aw, well, that's a shame," Chad said, though his tone suggested the opposite. "I'm looking forward to beating you once again."

Jake winced. His last round in the rodeo ring had been a torturous one. He and Letti had just broken up and Jake had spent the night tossing and turning in his little twin bed. He was scheduled to go up to school in the next week and he couldn't bear the thought of hanging on to Letti, making her wait, while he was away. He knew college was a time for discovery, a time for both of them to learn more about themselves. He didn't want either of them to feel like they had to hang on to what they had together, as good as it had been.

The result of all that heavy thinking had been a lethargic and slow Jake in the arena. He had lost heavily that day, and couldn't bring himself to care. Chad had been crowing like a rooster at dawn, but Jake could only focus on the fact that Letti hadn't even shown up that day.

In the end, he had been grateful she hadn't.

"Let's just have a good time, huh?" Jake said, turning around and sticking his hand toward Chad. He had more important things to worry about than a petty rival.

Chad spat once again, this time into the dirt by Jake's cowboy boots. "Sure. Let's." Then he turned on a heel and strode away, head held high as though his hat were a crown.

Jake dropped his hand and allowed himself a very pleasurable eye-roll. Some people never changed.

Soon enough, the time came for Jake's first turn in the arena. Other cowboys tipped their hats or slapped Jake on the shoulder, wishing him luck with the calf roping. Nobody asked about his mother, though their situation was common knowledge among the circuit. Even Chad had kept his mouth shut about it. Bringing up such a sensitive topic could throw a rider off his game in a bad way and nobody wanted that.

People ended up dead that way.

When Jake bolted from the gate at the start of his round, the roar of the crowd temporarily deafened him. Adrenaline spiked through his bloodstream, reminding him of all the reasons why he loved rodeo. Grinning, Jake chased after the calf, rope twirling above his head, though he could tell something was off. He forced himself to clear his mind, to focus on the task at hand.

In the end, he was pleased with his time, though he knew he could have done better. Glancing up into the stands as he walked his horse out, he spotted Morris with his girl up near the top of the bleachers, and gave a tip of the hat.

A shout had Jake shifting his gaze lower. There, sitting front and center, were Letti and his mother, both dressed in full cowgirl regalia. Letti and Esther waved to him, grinning. His heart swelled and warmed at the sight. And for the first time in a long time, Jake felt something settle inside him that he hadn't realized had been disrupted.

He sent them a quick wink and tip of the hat before disappearing inside.

Part of him should have been upset that Letti had brought his mother out to the rodeo. She didn't have the energy. She should be at home resting, recovering. Her immune system was compromised from the treatment. If Jake understood anything the doctors said, it was this. Instead, Letti allowed Esther to come out, risk herself and her health.

But he couldn't be angry. Not with Letti. Not with his mother.

The kiss flashed in his mind's eye.

That kiss shouldn't have happened. It had been a mistake, a moment of weakness. But he couldn't deny the shock of pleasure that had raced through him at the feel of her soft lips. A strange sort of comfort. He had wanted to wrap her up in his arms and tell them both that he had made a mistake leaving all those years ago. He should have been happy and content with his life, with her. Instead, the world had beckoned and he had ran, leaving everything behind.

And yet, she was still there. As though waiting just for him.

A familiar burn deepened in Jake's chest, one he hadn't felt in years. More than anything, Jake wanted to put on a good show for his mother. And for Letti, if he were being truly honest with himself.

It might have mattered more than the money.

Shaking his head, Jake pushed aside all those thoughts and tried to focus back on the game. He wouldn't be impressing anybody if he didn't get his head on straight.

The next event would be barrel racing, which would test his agility on the horse. Seeing as how he still felt a bit rusty, Jake's game plan was to hang on and pray. When Jake entered the arena, his gaze immediately went up to where he had spotted Letti and his mother. They waved and cheered loudest of everybody. He sent them a confident grin.

It took a moment, but he realized he truly did feel confident.

"Let's go, boy," Jake said to Duke and started the race around the arena.

The old familiar moves felt comfortable rather than jarring. His hips and knees flowed with the animal beneath him as they twisted and turned around the barrels. The roar of the crowd muted beneath the racing of his heart and the rush of his breath. Duke snorted, jerking at the reins, as though in protest. Finally, Jake hightailed it right off the arena to a roar of noise.

"Nice work, Waller!" came several shouts at once. Jake grinned.

Even Chad's snarky comments couldn't assuage the natural high of a good round in the arena.

As Jake prepped for his final turn in the arena, he found himself wishing Letti were right next to him, giving him a kiss on the cheek for good luck, just like she used to all those years ago. Why couldn't they have that again? Suddenly, every excuse he had been making for himself over the years disappeared, irrelevant in the light of his rediscovered feelings.

He never really stopped loving her.

How many men get a second chance? Jake didn't know, but he wasn't about to question it. Today, right after this last round, he would find her and he would tell her.

The last event was the most challenging for Jake, though it had also been his best back in the day. Bronc riding had been a rush for him since the first day he fell off a crazed horse. He'd broken a few ribs and a collar bone over the course of his rodeo career, but it had been college that had taken him away from it. Now, he'd get a chance to jump back in, to prove to himself that he hadn't lost it.

"Can't handle the bull, huh? Settling for the bronc?" Chad taunted as Jake walked by.

Jake ignored him.

The horse wasn't his and was being prepped by a pair of hands that traveled with the circuit. When Jake climbed onto the horse in the bucking chute, the men steadied the horse, which had been kicking his legs in agitation. A good sign. The horse was raring to go. And so was Jake.

With a quick prayer, Jake grabbed hold of the handle that would be his only lifeline for the next eight seconds. Glancing up, he caught sight of Letti's golden hair before the gate flew open and the horse burst free.

The horse bucked, spun, grunted and screamed with the effort of kicking Jake off the horse. He kept his legs kicked up and out, marking the horse out and spurring him into action. Jake could only focus on the movement of the wild beast and his breathing, the world spinning away for those eight seconds.

Jake felt like he could fly away in that moment and grinned.

After what felt like a lifetime, the pickup riders were there, easing the horse and safely removing Jake from the scene. The horse was led away and Jake gave a jaunty bow, swiping his hat from the dirt where it had landed earlier and brushing it off on one leg.

He grinned at Letti and his mother, who stood at their seats and cheered.

Jake waited until the end of the rodeo, inappropriately pleased when Chad barely lasted four seconds on his bronc, let alone the three he managed on the bull. That was a bad day even for Chad.

When Jake found out he placed third, second and first in his three events, he whooped as the others clapped him on the back and shouted for his victorious return. He didn't have the heart to tell them that this might be his last show. He could already feel the pain crawling up and down his back.

Collecting his prize, Jake saluted farewell to the others and made his way out to find Letti and Esther.

"There he is!" Letti maneuvered the wheel chair around so Esther could see him, too weak to walk on her own.

Jake shook his head at the two of them, but still couldn't muster up any irritation.

"Look at you two, thick as thieves," Jake said as he bent to give his mother a kiss on the cheek. She passed him her notepad.

I'm so proud of you. And don't you ever try to give your poor mother another heart attack again!

"Again" had been underlined three times. Jake laughed and kissed her one more time. "Sorry, Mother. You weren't supposed to see that." He leveled his gaze at Letti, though he knew he couldn't hide his glee, ruining the effect.

To prove his point, Letti shrugged and grinned back at him from her place behind Esther. "She wanted to come see. Who was I to stop her?"

"Her nurse," Jake said. "You are literally pushing her in and out of here."

Esther slapped a playful hand on his forearm, wordlessly telling him to quit his teasing.

"Thank you," he said, looking at Letti. "I'm glad you two were here today."

"Jake! We gotta start rounding up!"

Turning around, Jake lifted his hand and nodded. He knew he'd have to go and get back to work, though he wanted to spend the day with his girls instead.

His girls.

"Letti," Jake said, nerves clutching at his stomach as he walked to her side. He reached for her hand resting on one of the handlebars. When she let him take it, some of the nerves eased and he smiled.

"I'll be home soon. Then, I was hoping we could talk?" he tried to make it sound as optimistic as he could. "Maybe we could go to dinner?"

Letti's eyes flickered down to Esther, who sat quiet and unassuming in front of them. Jake would have to give her a big Mother's Day present this year. Then Letti's smile bloomed as she looked up at him.

"I'd like that. Dinner. Let me call a friend to care for Esther. Is that alright with you?" she asked his mother. Jake's heart swelled, grateful that Letti always made sure to include Esther in any and all decision making. Just because she couldn't talk, didn't mean she didn't have an opinion.

Esther nodded, clapping her hands over her head to convey her enthusiasm. Jake and Letti laughed.

"I gotta go," Jake said. He stepped closer, pulling Letti's hand toward him, tucking it in his hand up against his chest. He reached for her cheek with his other hand, drawing her closer to him. Then he laid his lips on hers, more meaningful, more present than their previous kiss had been.

Warmth shot through him, and all at once, Jake felt complete. Unable to stop himself, he smiled against her lips, feeling her answering one before he withdrew. Then he kissed her nose, a sign of affection he used to do a long time ago.

"See you later." Then he bent to kiss his mother goodbye before turning on a heel and heading back toward the animal barns.

It had been the perfect day.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Jake gritted his teeth against the pain that radiated from his hips and lower back as he turned the horse around, guiding more heavies into the birthing shed.

So much for his dinner plans with Letti tonight. The calves had started dropping as soon as he was ready to call it a day. He had been envisioning taking her to that little Italian place just off of Third, ordering a bottle of wine and just enjoying himself for the evening. And after Letti went home, soaking in a long bath filled to the brim with Epsom salts.

He had never felt so old in his life.

But the beginning of calving season on the ranch meant all personal wishes were sacrificed. He had called Letti, apologized for their canceled dinner and had asked if she'd be willing to stay the night. He offered up his bed, grateful he had just washed the sheets, explaining he didn't know when he'd be home.

Letti had been surprisingly understanding and lighthearted about the whole thing. She told him to take it easy and wished him luck. This wasn't his first calving season, but he had never worked one right after a rodeo performance, either.

It had been days. Days segregating out heavies, supervising births, moving calves and heifers out. Morris had been in a foul mood for most of the past week, biting out demands and orders as though he were General Patton. Jake had been tempted on more than one occasion to pull Morris aside and ask him what was gnawing at him, but Jake had either been too tired or too busy whenever he thought about it.

It seemed like the first wave of births was drawing to a close. Jake couldn't help but send up a prayer of thanks at the break, looking forward to a long shower and his bed. He hadn't been home in five days, sneaking cat naps on Morris' couch or even in the tack room once against a pile of blankets. Everybody worked hard, keeping mostly to themselves in their exhausted stupor.

"Jake," Morris called, waving him over as Jake ushered the last of the heavies into the shed.

"Yes, boss?" he asked, keeping an eye on the cows. They liked to wander back out, as though they knew what was coming.

"Get out of here. I don't want to see you for twenty-four hours, got it? I think this is as much of a break as we're gonna get."

Jake nodded, too tired to bother arguing with him. "I'll be back in twenty-four hours. Call me if you need me." He gave the offer, hoping Morris wouldn't take him up on it.

Morris grinned. "I won't. But thanks all the same."

Jake kicked the sides of his horse. This time, he rode Daisy. The horses had all been worked hard over the last few days, just like every year, and were rotated among the cowhands and sleep.

He took his time brushing her down, giving her extra attention and petting her rough brown and white coat. She chewed at the bottom of his shirt, searching for apples.

"Sorry, girl," he said on a soft laugh. "I'll bring you extras next time, I promise."

Jake moved as though he were in a daze as he put the equipment away and walked out to his truck. He doubted he should be driving, but he wanted to be home.

The sun peaked up and over the horizon, its rays weak, the morning cold enough that his breath fogged in the air. He climbed into his truck and turned the engine over, blasting the heat and hoping the truck would warm up fast enough to thaw his fingers and toes before he arrived home.

He allowed himself to think of Letti as he drove home. He hoped she wasn't upset with him for not being home these past few nights. He called every night to check on them, please to hear they were doing just fine without him.

"In fact, don't come home anytime soon," Letti had joked. "We're right in the middle of Pride and Prejudice and Mr. Darcy had just proclaimed his love for Elizabeth."

Jake had no idea what any of that meant but he appreciated that Letti and his mother were having a good time.

He hoped they would be awake when he got home. And just in case they weren't, his game plan was to hole up in the bathroom and stand in the shower for at least an hour. That would give everybody enough time to wake up and make themselves decent.

The porch light was on when Jake pulled into the driveway. He half-stumbled up the stairs and slipped his key in the doorknob. Pushing open the door, Jake let out a grateful sigh at the warmth that surrounded him.

And the smell of breakfast.

"Marry me," he said without thinking, slipping off his jacket and hanging it on the coat rack.

"Excuse me?" Letti gave an amused chuckle as she spooned scrambled eggs out of the pan. Then she opened the oven and pulled out a plate of bacon, transferring a heaping pile of it onto the plate of eggs. "Sit. You're delusional."

Jake nodded and wandered to the dining room table, his stomach suddenly twisting with hunger pains. Gone were any thoughts of his hot shower and bed. All he wanted was food and Letti's company.

He was flexible that way.

Letti set the plate in front of Jake and passed him a fork. Jake smiled his thanks up at her for just a moment before diving in. He barely tasted the food before swallowing.

"I'll go change the sheets on your bed," Letti said, then left before Jake could protest.

As Jake ate, he looked around the house. It was as though nothing had changed and yet everything had. There were flowers on the coffee table. A fire burned in the hearth. Did Letti build that all by herself? He didn't know she knew how, but it made sense that she would. Everything was spotless, even the dishes Letti had used to make breakfast were done except for the pan of eggs. Had she been making the eggs for herself and decided to give them to Jake when he arrived? A carafe of orange juice sat on the table next to Jake's plate, condensation dripping down the side. He poured himself a glass and drank deeply.

He wasn't sure how he felt about it. Something felt off.

It felt... homey.

Jake's stomach clenched, this time not in hunger. He looked around once again, listening to the sounds of Letti snapping the sheets in his bedroom as she made his bed.

Since when had Letti stopped being his mother's nurse and turned into Suzy Homemaker?

Jake didn't want this. He didn't want someone to watch after him like this, to worm her way into his life like this. He worked better on his own. He had hired Letti to care for his mother. That was it. He didn't hire her to take care of him too, to make him breakfast and make his bed with fresh sheets after a long few days of work.

All he had asked her for was dinner. A conversation. To figure out if they could be together once again. Not all this. He had been wrong.

He couldn't put them both through this again.

Letti walked out of the hallway with a smile on her face, as though pleased at a job well done. "All set in there. Ready when you are."

Jake could only sit there, staring at her, wondering when all of this went horribly, horribly wrong.

"How's mother?" he asked, forcing the words out of his throat.

"She's good. Sleeping in this morning," she said, then grinned. "We stayed up a little too late finishing up the Pride and Prejudice miniseries."

Jake nodded, as though he could understand. But his mind had been taken up with warning bells and alarms.

"Why don't you go ahead and go home for today," Jake said, standing and picking up his own plate, which he would put in his own sink to wash when he wanted to. "Morris doesn't need me back until tomorrow morning."

Letti's brow furrowed. "Your mom has an appointment today at two. Are you up for taking her?"

No, he thought, giving a mental grimace. The smart thing to do would be to have Letti stay and take care of his mother. But all he wanted was for her to leave his house. Let him breathe.

He was spared answering the question when his mother's bedroom door opened. Without a word, Letti left Jake to stand there, plate in hand, as she checked on Esther.

A few minutes later, Jake had deposited the plate in the sink, just like he wanted. Letti had helped his mother to the couch, where she scribbled on her notepad furiously. When she finished, she held the notepad out, waiting for Jake to come and take it himself.

Letti is staying. You are taking a shower and going to sleep. She will take me to my appointment. No arguments.

Jake scowled at the handwriting. Then his mother's hand, paper thin and light, rested on his arm. He looked over the notepad to meet her sharp hazel eyes.

"You've done enough," she rasped, more a whisper than a voice. "Let her help us."

Jake nodded, unable to do otherwise. Looking back over to Letti, he watched as she stared at her fingers, clenching them tight in her lap. She knew something was wrong. That Jake was upset about something.

When had everything gone so wrong?

"I'm going to shower then go to bed," Jake said, handing the notepad back to his mother. "Thank you for taking care of Mom," he added to Letti, hoping it would sooth any ruffled feathers. Then he turned on his heel and rushed toward the bathroom.

Shower, then sleep. He would know what to do in the morning.

CHAPTER EIGHT

The next morning, Letti pulled into the driveway of the Waller's house, surprised to see Jake's truck sitting there. She had thought he would be up and out before dawn, anxious to get back to the ranch, anxious to be away from her.

She had spent most of the night tossing and turning, catching minutes of sleep here and there. Her brain wouldn't stop replaying the events of yesterday morning and Jake's arrival home. He had looked exhausted, even delirious with his proposal of marriage to her as soon as he walked in the door. Then, in between the time she went to change the sheets on his bed and returned, he had morphed into a different man. The same man she had met her first day on the job.

Concealer could only do so much magic beneath her eyes this morning. She brought her extra-large thermos along with her, filled to the brim with coffee. She already planned on topping it off after breakfast.

She didn't know what she had done, but Jake's defenses had snapped back into place with a vengeance. He had even insisted she leave! It had taken Esther's intervention for him to back down and go to bed. Even then, she could hear him tossing and turning throughout the morning. In the end, she suggested that they go out to lunch before Esther's afternoon appointment. Esther had readily agreed.

Jake had remained in his bedroom through dinner, though there was evidence that he had come out for a sandwich at one point. She washed up after him and kept a dinner plate warmed for him in the oven, in case he decided to come out after she left.

She just didn't understand. What happened to their kiss after the rodeo? What happened to the promise of dinner and a conversation? Letti could have sworn that Jake felt the same way that she did, so why the attitude?

Relax. He's probably just tired from the last few days.

Letti took a steadying breath, forcing herself to let it out slowly. She knew the calving season was a tough one for everyone. Ranchers, cowhands, their wives and family. Tempers were short and nerves frayed. Things were always done and said in the heat of the moment that people didn't mean.

It was the same for people who had just won their events at the rodeo. That rush and release of adrenaline.

Letti would have been lying if she said that thought hadn't occurred to her. That maybe Jake hadn't really meant his offer of dinner. Maybe he was caught up in the excitement of being in a rodeo again, of winning, and it had resulted in an unfortunate promise.

She shook her head. There was no use worrying about it. But she did resolve to ask him about it.

If he waited around long enough to talk to her, that is.

In truth, watching him in the arena had been an even bigger eye-opener for her than her conversation with Esther had been. As she watched Jake's strong frame maneuver his horse where he needed to be, controlling the animal with all the command at his disposal, she couldn't help but feel awed at the display. She remembered watching him when they were younger, cheering him in from the stands, giving him a quick kiss of good luck on the cheek.

In a different time, in a different life, he had confided in her that rodeo had once been his dream. But he also had a strong sense of responsibility, one that wouldn't let himself miss his chance at going to college and making a better life for himself and his family.

It was just a shame that there had been no room for her in his life in either scenario.

And maybe there wasn't any room in his life now, either.

As much as the thought hurt, Letti forced herself to shove it aside as she gathered her things and exited her car. She walked up to the front door, slipping her key into the door. It opened before she could turn the knob.

"Colette," Jake said, tone icy.

Letti froze. Nobody called her Colette, not even her brother. That Jake felt he needed to...

"Good morning," she said, forcing herself to behave professionally. "I hope you got plenty of rest."

"I got enough." He didn't move from the doorway. Letti raised an eyebrow.

"Is Esther up?" she asked, trying to take a peak over one broad shoulder.

"No."

"May I come in?" Letti asked, confused why he wasn't letting her inside.

"No." Then Jake removed her keys from the door and proceeded to remove their house key from the ring. Letti's stomach sank at the sight, knowing what was coming and having no way of stopping it.

Jake held out her keys to her. "I'm afraid we have to let you go."

Letti sucked in a breath, feeling her chest tighten to the point of pain. She backed up a step, her eyes blurring.

"I don't know what happened, or why you feel like you need to do this," she said, refusing to apologize for something she didn't know about. "Is anybody else coming to care for Esther?"

Jake's face hardened impossibly further. "Yes, but that is no longer your concern. Now, if you don't mind, we all have a long day ahead of us."

Dismissed. She was being dismissed. A tear fell down one cheek. Nothing had hurt this bad since the last time they had broken up. And they weren't even back together.

"I see," she said, forcing her voice to remain steady. "I'll be on my way then." She didn't bother thanking him for any opportunity, like her professionalism demanded. She hadn't done anything wrong that she could see. And she couldn't help but worry over Esther.

She hoped Jake knew what he was doing.

Swiping her keys from his hand, Letti turned and blindly walked down the steps toward her car. Shutting herself in, Letti allowed herself to bow her head for just a moment, to gather herself together before she drove home.

Lord, what have I done?

She didn't expect an answer. But she sent all her pain up, hoping for comfort. Then she turned on her car and a blast of heat warmed her.

Somehow, she arrived home. When Dan opened up the front door to their house, she realized she had been sitting in the driveway, her car running for the past however-long.

Without a word, Dan crossed to the car, opened her door and reached in to turn the ignition. Then he unbuckled her seat-belt, lifted her up out of the car, leaving her purse and coffee thermos behind. He carried her into the house, passed the living room and into the hallway that lead down the length of the house. Kicking open her bedroom door, Dan gently sat her down and stripped her jacket from her trembling shoulders. Taking her jacket, Dan left the room.

Letti heard him leave the house, heard the slam of her car door, heard him come back in. He must have placed her keys and purse on the side entryway table before walking back into her room with her coffee thermos.

"Drink," he said, thrusting it at her.

She took a healthy gulp, grateful for the heat that cascaded down through her.

"What happened?" Dan said, glowering.

"Jake fired me," she said. Then began to sob.

Dan snatched the thermos from her hand before she could drop it, setting it on her nightstand. Then he sat beside her and wrapped her up into his big arms. She would have complained of being smothered in one large shoulder, but she needed to be held tight.

She knew her brother hated to see her cry. But every time she tried to stop the tears, they came harder. Dan's t-shirt grew damp under her cheeks as she struggled to breathe. Dan rubbed his hands in light circles around her back, remaining still and steady. A rock to her beating waves.

Finally, the sobs ebbed and Letti pushed herself back up. Embarrassed, she refused to look up at Dan until his finger coaxed her chin up.

"There's more to this than a lost job, isn't there?" he asked, voice quiet.

It all came pouring out, as fast as the sobs had. "He kissed me, remember? Then we never really talked about it, but I talked to his mother, who told me Jake needed me. And I realized that I never..." her voice closed on another sob. She tried to slow down. "I never stopped loving him," she finished. Then she shook her head. "I took Esther to see Jake at the rodeo and afterward, he just seemed so happy. So pleased that we were there. He kissed me again. Invited me to dinner so we could talk."

Dan have a harsh grunt, his hands tightening into fists on his thighs.

"I don't know what happened between then and this morning. The calves started dropping, you know that. I've been there, doing my job. When he got home yesterday morning, I washed his sheets. Made sure he had breakfast. I don't understand."

The tears dripped down her face again, though the earnest sobs left her alone for the time being. She suddenly felt so heavy, weighed down by exhaustion.

"You can't know unless he tells you," Dan said. He shook his head. "You need rest."

Letti nodded, not even bothering to stand and slip her clothes off before crawling into the center of her bed. Dan reached out and slipped her shoes off, sticking a finger through a small hole that had formed along a seam and sighing. She rolled her eyes.

"I just lost my job. Can't go get a new pair just yet," she said, curling up onto one side.

Dan tugged the blanket up and around her. "We'll argue about that when you wake up."

Letti murmured a soft sound before closing her eyes and letting darkness take her.

__________

Letti and Dan did argue about the shoes later that afternoon. Dan had gone out of his way to buy three pairs for her to try on by the time she woke up. At first, she had refused. Then Dan had wrestled her down and forced a shoe on. Breathless and disgruntled, Letti finally agreed to try all of them on. Two pairs fit. Dan took the third pair back.

Standing at the oven, Letti stirred up the casserole she threw together for lunch. Dan would be home any minute, ready for a heaping plate of food. Since she never got the chance to make him lunch, she figured today would be a good day to make it up to him.

Dan had been adamant that she take the rest of yesterday and today off from any volunteer work. She had put up a good fight about it, but eventually conceded when Dan told her this would be a good opportunity to find another job instead. So, she did the laundry, slept, and applied for as many jobs as she physically could.

And prayed.

Every time she turned around, she remembered how closed off Jake had been, how utterly cold he had been toward her in the end. She still wasn't sure what she had done, but she was ready to rush over to his house, bang on his door until he opened it, and demand an explanation.

But it wasn't her place. Jake had made his decision. Just like he had all those years ago. Maybe it was really God's will that they remain separated.

Though that did nothing to ease the ache in her heart.

So, she prayed, asking God to open a door, just one tiny little door for her.

The front door opened.

Wrong door, she thought.

"Lucy, I'm home!" Dan called in a thick accent.

"Har har," she called back. "And after I slaved over your lunch."

"Mmm," he hummed as he entered the kitchen. "Smells good."

He pulled down two plates as Letti's cell phone rang.

"Dish up, I'll be right back," she said, grabbing her phone from the counter and heading into the living room.

"Hello?"

"Miss Fletcher?" A strong female voice asked. She sounded vaguely familiar.

"This is she," Letti said. "May I ask who's calling?"

"Miss Fletcher, hello! I'm glad I caught you. This is Marissa Pratt from OHSU Hospital. Is now a good time to talk?"

Letti sat down heavily on the couch, her breath leaving her.

Oregon Health and Science University! It had been months since they had told her the job she had applied for went to another candidate, since they promised to call her should another position open up.

Now they were finally calling her! Her heart raced, hoping against all hope that they had a job ready to offer her.

Some door!

"Miss Fletcher?" Marissa prompted.

"Yes," Letti nearly gasped, then winced and forced herself to swallow. "Sorry, I'm here. Now is a perfect time."

"Excellent," Marissa said, her pleasure evident. "We had another CNA position open for us. How quickly can you be down here?"

Letti frowned in confusion. "For an interview?" she asked.

"No. To start. I seem to remember you living in Washington, right? Buckley? You would probably need a couple of weeks to pack and move."

Letti's head spun. Pack? Move? "You're offering me the job already?" she asked, feeling a little slow.

"Yes," Marissa said, giving a little laugh. "Sorry. Today's been a hectic one. I'm probably not explaining myself well at all. We'd like to offer you the job." Marissa listed off the salary and benefits package, which made Letti's jaw drop. She wouldn't have to fight Dan about new shoes for a long time with that kind of pay. "And, of course, there's the added benefit of working with us while you attended school."

"Excuse me?" Letti asked.

"Nursing school. If you wanted to continue your education, that wouldn't be a problem on our end. Sure, you have to go through the application process, but being an employee already, your chances are high at being accepted. We have a comprehensive tuition reimbursement program, should you choose."

"Nursing school." Letti shook her head. She needed to get her act together. She was sounding like a complete idiot. "How can I say no," she said.

"Great!" Letti could hear a few keys typing away on Marissa's end. "When can you start?"

Letti hesitated. She wanted to pack up and leave as soon as possible. She needed to be out of this town, away from Jake. Away from anything that reminded her of Jake. Which was everything. But she still needed to talk to Dan. And find a place to live.

"Is Monday too soon?" she asked. Today was Thursday. That gave her three and a half days to pack and find a place to live. One and half business days. She must have lost her mind.

"Certainly not, if you think you can manage it," Marissa said, surprise evident. "Let me give you the phone number for the owner of some decent apartments nearby. Several of our other nurses live there. Maybe they'll have an opening for you."

Letti quickly found a pen and scribble the number on the corner of the newspaper Dan had been reading just that morning. Excitement bubbled in her stomach and it was all she could do not to giggle when Marissa wished her luck with the move and hung up. Letti stared at the phone, grinning.

"What was that all about?" Dan asked, carrying a plate over to her.

Letti jumped up and squealed, leaping onto the couch and dancing. "I can't believe it! I just can't!"

"Woah," Dan said, setting her plate down and reaching for her. His brow furrowed. "What's going on?"

"OHSU! They just called me. I have a job! I start Monday!" She landed on the floor with a thud and danced across the living room and down the hall. Dan followed her.

"OHSU? Portland? How are you starting a job there on Monday when you live here?" Dan asked.

"I'm moving!" Letti giggled and waltzed into her bedroom. Heading toward the closet she reached inside and took out her large duffel bag. It would be enough for most of her clothes and a few personal belongings. She wouldn't need much to start with. She could come back up during the next few weekends and pick up anything she forgot.

"Now wait just a minute," Dan said, his voice a warning. "You can't just pick up and move to Oregon."

"Dan," Letti said, turning toward him, her face serious. "This is the chance of a lifetime for me. I get to study and work at one of the most prestigious hospitals on the west coast. Not only that, but I'm all but guaranteed acceptance into their nursing program. They have a tuition reimbursement program. Don't you see? This is it!"

Dan sat on Letti's bed, his shoulders slumped. "I get it, I do," Dan ran a hand through his dirty blond hair, still shorn close in a military cut. He claimed he liked it. Letti wasn't so sure. "I'm just afraid you're rushing into this. What about Jake?"

Letti's stomach clenched. "Jake has let me know how he feels," she said.

"I don't think he has," Dan said, narrowing his eyes at her. "I don't want you to run off to Portland just because you're running away from him."

Letti shifted her gaze from Dan's. He'd nailed one of her biggest motivating factors within minutes. Of course he would. He was her brother, one of the most observant people she knew.

"That's not entirely it," she hedged. She took a deep breath, wrapped her arms around herself. "Do I want to leave? Yes. But not only because of Jake. Can you blame me for wanting to start over in a different place? Different people? If I don't like it, I'll come home. And my résumé would look the better for it. Really. If I'm going to run away, this is a pretty opportune situation."

Dan sat in silence, watching her. He inherited that trait from their grandmother, though she would never tell him that. She remembered how he used to complain about that look. Finally, he nodded and stood from her bed.

"What can I do to help?" he asked.

Letti grinned and threw her duffel onto the bed. "We need to fight over who's keeping the Dutch oven."

Dan laughed and shook his head. "Let me call the guys at the jobsite. They should be fine without me for the rest of today and tomorrow."

As Dan left her room, Letti let herself believe, just for a moment, that things were going to be okay. She had her brother, she had a brand new job.

Things were looking up.

CHAPTER NINE

"Jake!" It was Morris, rushing into the barn as though something had caught fire. He had a wild, determined look in his eyes, one that made Jake question the man's sanity in that moment.

People always went mad during calving season.

"What's up, boss?" he said, stopping his brush down of Duke. He had been up most of the night, monitoring the heavies and moving any into the shed as necessary. A quick nap and one of those muffins Mrs. Greene had delivered to the ranch were on his to-do list.

"I gotta go. I've been meaning to talk to you about this, but how would you feel about being foreman?"

"Foreman?" Jake blinked, wondering if exhaustion was addling his brain. "Go? Where are you going?"

At that, Morris barked a half-crazed laugh and clapped Jake on the shoulder as though he had said the funniest thing Morris had ever heard.

"I'm going to New York. And I want you as my foreman. Oversee things while I'm gone. Hopefully, I won't be gone more than a few days. Then we'll talk." Morris began to stride away before Jake could think of uttering one syllable. "Oh," Morris added, spinning on one heel and walking backwards. "It comes with a raise, of course. Think of this as a probationary period. But I'm pretty sure you're the man for the job. Congratulations."

And he was gone.

Jake stood there, mouth opened, wondering if he had just dreamed the whole thing.

Morris... flying to New York? This must have something to do with that girl he's been acting so crazy about the last few days. The long-lost daughter of Mr. Greene next door. Morris had been giving her horseback riding lessons when he barely had the time for them and making it a point to go over to Greene Pastures to deliver hay, though Paige and Rhett had been at the ranch earlier that same morning.

Jake shook his head, turning back to the horse. Love made men crazier than calving season ever could.

Still, a promotion. To foreman. Jake couldn't believe it. He'd only been back a handful of months. The promotion to foreman was a very big step, one he wasn't sure Morris was in his right mind to give him. The first thing he wanted to do was race home and tell his mother about it. Did Morris even mean it?

Unbidden, the thought of Letti came to mind. He knew she would know what to do, what to think about Morris' offer.

But he had burned that bridge pretty thoroughly.

A flash of Letti's tear-welled eyes appeared in Jake's vision. Disgust filled him. Not at her. Never at her. But at himself.

He had treated her in a way he should never have treated a woman. Especially her. He had been callous. Rude. Even mean. Not allowing her to say goodbye. He didn't know what had taken over him, other than sheer panic.

He couldn't think around her. And he couldn't think without her.

When Esther had woken up and been introduced to her new nurse, one of the other candidates he would have picked if Letti hadn't been such an obvious choice, she had glared at the both of them, turned on her heel and went back into her room. She had even slammed the door like a petulant child, though Jake couldn't fault her. If she had her voice, no doubt she would have torn into him like she had whenever his teenage-self had been out past his curfew and worried her.

It took a little longer to convince the nurse to stay, in spite of his mother's behavior.

He could only hope both of them would forgive him. One day.

Jake finished up with Duke and moved all the equipment back into the tack room. It looked like barely controlled chaos. Calving season could make even the most organized places look like a tornado hit it.

In an effort to distract himself, though he desperately needed some shut-eye, Jake spent the next hour tidying up the tack room. Everybody else was either busy herding or sleeping, and just because Morris had promoted him to foreman, it didn't mean he could stop pulling his own weight. It only meant he had to work that much harder.

Try as he might, visions of Letti laughing with his mother in the living room kept assaulting him. The taste of those ridiculous green smoothies. They shouldn't have been as good as they were. And she always had a meal ready for him, no matter the time of night he came home.

Stop it. She's gone. You did that. Isn't that what you wanted?

He didn't dare answer himself and instead went inside for that muffin and a nap.

It seemed like only moments after he shut his eyes and let sleep claim him that he was being shaken awake.

"Something better be on fire," he grumbled, peeling his heavy eyes open. It felt like they had been filled with sand.

It was Eleanor Greene, wife of Max Greene next door. And she looked worried.

Alarm bells began to ring as Jake shoved himself up, pushing the blankets to the floor beside the couch he slept on.

"Mrs. Greene," he said, rubbing his tired face. "What's happened?"

"It's your mother," she said. Jake's sleep blurred eyes finally cleared enough to see she had been crying. "She's in the hospital."

Jake's veins iced over as he struggled to comprehend what Eleanor was saying. "What? Why? How?" As the message registered in his brain, Jake scrambled to find his boots, now buried under the blankets he had shoved to the floor.

"Her home care nurse, Amanda, tried calling you," Eleanor said. Jake winced. His phone had died a few hours ago and was sitting in the kitchen charging. "I hope you don't mind that I answered it. I just came by to drop off more food for you boys and it kept ringing. I figured it must be important."

"No, it's fine. Thank you, Mrs. Greene." Jake tried to smile and failed.

Eleanor reached out and gripped his hand. "Call me Eleanor. What can I do?"

Jake wracked his brain. He needed to get to the hospital, figure out what had happened. But Morris had left him in charge of the ranch.

"Would you mind letting the others know that you've brought food? And let them know I've gone to check on Mom, but I will be back soon. Tell them to call me or Cam if they have any issues."

Eleanor nodded, giving Jake a brave smile. "I'll be praying for you both."

Jake's heart twisted. He wasn't sure he deserved any prayers, but instead of telling her that, he said, "Thank you."

The drive to the hospital took half of forever. The entire time, Jake kept bargaining with God, praying that his mother would be alright and that this was just a minor setback. He couldn't help but wonder if this would have happened if Letti had been there. Fingers tightening on the steering wheel, Jake forced those thoughts out of his mind. They weren't productive.

Amanda stood from her spot in the waiting room when he burst through the main doors of the ER. The room was mostly white with beige accents strewn around and pictures of landscapes. A couple of tall plants stood in corners, and Jake wondered if they were real.

"Have they told you anything?" he asked when he approached Amanda, trying to keep his tone gentle, remind himself this probably wasn't her fault.

She shook her head, eyes and nose blotchy from crying. "I'm not family," she said in explanation.

Jake nodded. "Would you mind staying here for just a little longer until I find out what's going on?"

When she nodded, Jake turned and strode to the front desk, leaving Amanda to her seat. Without waiting for a receptionist's attention, he said, "I'm Jake Waller, son of Esther Waller. Can somebody please get a hold of the doctor that is caring for her?"

He received a couple stink-eyes from behind the desk, but they did as he asked.

And older woman in a white coat came out from the large gray double doors that lead back to the patient rooms. "Mr. Waller?" she called.

Jake walked toward her, his head beginning to pound. She gave him what looked like an encouraging smile, though he didn't let his hopes rise.

"Mr. Waller, I'm Doctor Royce. First things first, your mother is going to be fine."

If Jake hadn't been holding himself so rigidly, he would have collapsed into the nearest chair at her words.

"What happened?" he forced out, instead. "Can I see her?"

Doctor Royce nodded. "Come with me. I'll fill you in on the way there."

Jake followed her past the double doors, which buzzed open when she sent a look to the reception desk.

"She's just dehydrated and weak from not eating," Doctor Royce continued. Jake's jaw tightened.

His mother had only been with Amanda for four days!

"We got her on an IV drip to replenish those fluids. She still refuses to eat solids. We sometimes see this with throat cancer patients. Swallowing can be incredibly difficult if they've been doing radiation," Doctor Royce said.

Jake couldn't help but think this had nothing to do with the state of her throat. Why hadn't Amanda called him, let him know?

"Some further good news," Doctor Royce said, slowing down in the hallway. "We did a PET scan, just to make sure the cancer hadn't spread. Based on her previous scans, it looks like her treatment is working. The tumor is less than half of its original size."

Jake's throat closed, relief swelling his chest, making it hard to breathe. He nodded, lowering his head, hoping the doctor couldn't see the tears that burned his eyes.

Man, he must be tired.

"What do we do now?" he asked, voice rough.

"She needs to eat. And drink plenty of water. We're going to keep her overnight, try to get her to eat something. We can't release her until she does."

Jake nodded. "Can I see her?"

Doctor Royce gestured toward the door on their left. Jake almost ran to it, then paused at the door.

Darkness cloaked the room. The light from the hallway behind him showed Jake where the bed sat, barely illuminating the shape of his mother in it. She looked so small in the bed. Frail even. Jake reminded himself that the tumor was shrinking, that his mother would be alright. She just needed food and water.

Walking into the room, Jake let the door snick shut behind him. He made his way to the side of her bed, looking for the bedside lamp he spotted before the darkness took over. The overhead light would be too jarring for his mother.

The soft light filled the room as Jake snapped the switch on. His mother rested propped up on pillows, staring into nothingness. He didn't understand why she wasn't watching TV or reading.

"Hi, Mom," he said, not quite sure what else to say. Her hands clenched in the blankets.

She's upset.

"Doctors tell me you haven't been eating," he added. "But they also said your tumor has gone down, which is great news."

Esther turned her head slightly and narrowed her gaze at him.

Jake rubbed his hands over his face before collapsing in the chair nearest the bed. "What do you want me to say? I know you're upset that Letti is gone. But that's no reason to risk your health like this. Why are you doing this? To get my attention? Well, you've got it!"

His voice had risen to a near shout. Panting, Jake tried to reel his emotions back in. It had been a long week. He was ready for calving season to be over. Ready for his mother to be well again. Ready for life to go back to the way it had been before.

His mother held out a notepad to him.

You're a fool.

Jake laughed, unable to contain the emotions any longer. He felt deranged. He felt out of control. He didn't know what else to do but laugh.

It wasn't until his mother's hand brushed at his cheek did Jake realize he was crying.

"I'm sorry," Jake whispered, wiping his face with his hands. "I don't know what to do. Morris offered me a job as foreman of Rowland Ranch today. But how can I run a ranch if I can't even take care of my own mother?"

Esther pushed the notepad back toward him.

You're too hard on yourself. You believe you don't deserve any good that comes your way. Believe me. God and I both want you to have joy in your life. Joy helps you through the hard times as well as the good.

Jake stared at the paper, unable to think of anything other than Letti. She had given him joy these past weeks. Watching her take care of his mother, and take care of him, had been a weight off his shoulders. They had fun together, all of them. He remembered Letti and his mother cheering him on at the rodeo, how lighthearted and happy he had been in that moment.

He needed her. He loved her. He never stopped loving her.

"I love her," he whispered, afraid to utter the words any louder. "I never stopped. But I don't think she'll ever forgive me." Jake sat back in his chair. He watched his mother frown before she scribbled a brief message.

Go get her.

Jake clenched his fists around the notepad. He wanted to run to her, to pull her into his arms and tell how sorry he was. How stupid he had been to ever think that pushing her away was the smart thing to do. Both in the past and now.

Even if Letti never forgave him, he owed her that much.

"Tell you what," he said, passing her notepad back to her. "I'll go as soon as you eat something."

Esther smiled and nodded, already reaching down to adjust her bed into a more upright position.

Jake rang for the nurse and asked for them to bring his mother a meal. At the first bite, Jake leaned over to kiss his mother goodbye. Then he raced for the door.

And finally allowed himself to hope.

CHAPTER TEN

Everything Letti cared enough to bring down to Portland with her filled her little red car to the brim, blocking her review mirror and the passenger side mirror. She knew that wasn't strictly legal, but it was cheaper than renting a trailer that wouldn't attach to her car anyway. Besides, the drive down to Portland was a relatively quick one, one that she had made plenty of times over the years.

But combined with the fact that she felt exhausted from the last three days of frantic packing and coordinating lease agreements via phone calls and email, Letti wasn't quite sure if she would make it out alive.

Dan had done everything he could to make the move an easier one for her, though he couldn't make the trip down with her. He could only neglect his jobsite for so long and she refused to let him risk his job just because she was moving. She had promised him she would be back for weekend visits as time allowed and invited him to come down any time he could, though his busy season was just about to start. She had a feeling she wouldn't be seeing much of her brother for a while.

Letti's heart tugged in her chest. She had said all her goodbyes to the hospital and hospice nurses she had volunteered with, had even written a letter to Esther. The letter had been a painful one to write. She didn't want to come off as petty or mean toward Jake, but he was the reason why Letti felt she had to leave. Esther didn't need to know that. In the end, she wrote about the opportunity at OHSU and sent her well wishes for a speedy recovery.

Exiting the freeway proved to be tricky with only one functional mirror and a very wide blind spot, but soon enough Letti found herself entering the tiny parking structure underneath a modest apartment building. The price for the apartment had been a bit steep, but it was close to OHSU. Letti would be able to afford it after a couple of paychecks. Until then, Dan had forwarded the funds into her account, despite her protests.

"Consider it a loan," he had said with a kiss to the forehead.

"Fine," Letti had grumbled back.

She would pay him back as soon as she possibly could. He knew she would.

Resisting the urge to duck her head as her car entered the parking garage (the ceiling hovered impossibly low), Letti quickly found her parking space, marked 3E. Her apartment number. Maneuvering the car into the tight space proved to be a little tricky, but when she finally put the car in park, Letti leaned her head back against the headrest and let out a long and loud sigh of relief.

"Made it," she said to herself. Then shut her eyes.

Even though the excitement still bubbled in her belly, her heart still ached. Oh, how she wished she could have shared this excitement with Jake. What would he have done, though? Would he have wished her luck and sent her on her way? Would he have tried to convince her to stay? Would he have wanted to come with her?

Letti shook her head. She came all the way down to Portland to get away from those thoughts. She needed to start over.

Starting with unpacking this poor, old car of hers.

Letti pulled her duffel bag and a backpack stuffed with toiletries and her laptop out of the trunk. The backseat had been reserved for large plastic containers filled with books and kitchen essentials. She would come back for those later. She definitely didn't want to leave those in the car overnight. She'd never see them again.

The first thing Letti noticed about the apartment complex was the fact that there was no elevator. Letti mentally groaned as she trudged up the stairs, thinking about she would have to haul every single one of those plastic totes in her car up three flights.

She wished Dan were here.

Her body ached from all the activity over the last few days. She hadn't been sleeping well, too keyed up with excitement and sorrow in a sickening twist of adrenaline. Now that she had arrived, she was crashing fast. Hopefully the bathtub would be a decent one.

The second thing she noticed, was that the staircase was very narrow. Narrow enough for her to worry if some of the plastic totes would fit up them as she carried them. She would just have to figure it out.

The last thing she noticed was a man, sitting on the staircase as it reached the third floor. He sat with his head tucked into his arms, which held his knees together. She wondered if he was asleep. Was he a tenant?

His foot shifted and Letti noticed the cowboy boots on his feet, along with a pair of jeans that had seen just this side of too much mud over the past few days. Her heart began to race. She suddenly recognized that shade of brown hair.

"Jake?" she said, her voice barely a whisper. Then she took a breath. She needed to speak up. He must be exhausted. "Jake."

Jake startled awake, head whipping up and meeting her gaze head on.

He looked terrible, his face pale and drawn, his beautiful dark hair a ruffled mess. His chin sported a solid couple days' growth, which Letti found strangely compelling. She had only ever known him to be clean shaven. Even his clothes were rumpled.

But her heart still ached to see him. What was he doing here?

Jake stood, taking the few steps down to meet her. Without a word, he slipped the duffel bag out of her hand and hauled it up over his shoulder.

"Apartment 3E?" he asked.

Letti's jaw dropped. How did he know that?

Unless...

"Dan called you," she said.

"Not quite," Jake said, stopping outside the door marked 3E. There was a lock box just next to the door, one that Letti knew the code to. She tapped it in and it opened, revealing a pair of keys that would open the front door.

"What do you mean?" she asked, busying herself with opening the door. The lock gave way rather easily. She pushed the door open and flipped one of the switches by the front door. Musty, stale air met her nose. The light above the entryway lit up.

"I stopped by your house, but you were already gone."

Letti turned to face him, shock moving through her. He watched her from his spot in the hallway.

"May I come in?" he asked.

Letti moved aside and gestured for him to come in. Then she shut the door behind him.

"I don't understand," she said. "I just left about three hours ago."

Jake gave her a crooked grin. "You always were a slow driver."

She narrowed her eyes but couldn't stop the giggle. Then sobered.

Jake was here. In her new apartment in Portland. Why?

"What are you doing here?" she asked. Then a thought occurred to her. "Esther?"

"Is fine," Jake said with a smile. "She was pretty upset with me, and with good reason. She ended up in the hospital after I..." He wasn't sure how to finish that sentence. "She refused to eat. She always had a flare for the dramatic."

Letti shook her head, worried despite Jake's news to the contrary. "It's all those British period pieces, I'm sure. She's alright now?"

Jake nodded. "They did a PET scan. The tumor is less than half of the size it once was. Treatment is working."

Relief hit Letti hard, bringing tears to her eyes. Though Esther had a long battle ahead of her, Letti bowed her head and sent up a quick prayer of thanks.

"That still doesn't answer my question," she said. She lifted her gaze to his.

Jake seemed to hesitate at that. Then he straightened his shoulders.

"I won't lie. I had these grand plans to come down here, apologize until I was blue in the face, then convince you that you were making a mistake, that my mother and I both need you back home where you belong," Jake began. Then paused, lifting his hands to rub at his face. "But then, I got to thinking. We are in the same position we were in nearly five years ago, aren't we?"

Letti's breath caught but she nodded. "Though our roles are reversed," she said.

"Exactly. And the one thing I remember most about having to leave you behind is that I didn't. I wanted you with me the whole time I was away. I didn't want to leave college, but I didn't want to leave you either. I couldn't help but think how much better the whole experience would have been with you there. With me."

"Jake--" Letti said. Jake held a hand up to her mouth, not quite touching them. She could feel the warmth radiating from his fingertips.

"I am sorry," he said, his voice soft. "More sorry than you could ever imagine. I have no excuse for my behavior. And I don't expect you to even forgive me, but I hope you might one day. The truth is..." Jake shook his head at her. "I panicked. I saw how wonderful you were for my mother, felt how wonderful you were to me again, and I panicked. I didn't want to lose you again, so in the end, I pushed you away."

Letti's throat burned with tears, but she swallowed hard against them. Then she reached up and clasped his hand with hers. "Of course I forgive you," she whispered, a tear escaping, followed quickly by another. "I love you."

Jake's eyes widened as his hand tightening around hers. He pulled her close.

"I love you, too," he whispered, before lowering his head.

Letti's heart soared as their lips met. Finally, after all these years, she had her cowboy back. In that moment, she knew this was exactly what had needed to happen, that God's timing had been perfect, just as always. Warmth spread through her as Jake's arms wrapped around her, easing the tired ache from her bones.

When he withdrew, Jake said, "Guess Morris will have to be disappointed that I'm declining his job offer."

"What?" Blinking, Letti stepped back. "Job offer?"

"Morris offered me the job of foreman on the ranch," Jake explained with a shrug. "But I have a better idea."

"Oh?" Letti asked, frowning. "What's that?"

"Marry me?" Jake dropped to one knee in front of her. "I know I'm just a simple country man and I don't even have a ring to offer, but I've loved you since before I can even remember. We missed our chance once before, but I believe God wants us to have a second one. So, Letti, will you marry me?"

Letti's heart threatened to burst from her chest as she grinned down at Jake. "Yes, of course. Yes!"

At that Jake leapt up from the ground and encircled his arms around her, lifting her into a twirl. They laughed together as they swayed in the empty apartment.

"I love you," Jake said into her hair.

"I love you, too," she whispered back, holding him close.

And she thanked God for second chances.

About the Author

Brenna Welles is a Pacific Northwest native and an avid romance reader, with a particular soft spot for sweet and clean romances. After earning her master of arts in creative writing and literature, she decided to follow in her favorite authors' footsteps and begin writing her own stories. When she's not reading or writing, Brenna can be found hiking, on the beach, or at home crocheting the next big blanket on the list.
Letter from Brenna

I hope you enjoyed Taking Their Second Chance as much as I did writing it! For the first book in the Greene Pastures Series click here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B075NLXT1R

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