

FINDING REDEMPTION

By

Freia Hagen

Copyright © 2015 Freia Hagen

Published by Freia Hagen

Smashwords Edition

Cover Design: http://www.selfpubbookcovers.com/BeeJavier

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Discover other titles by Freia Hagen:

The Guardian

### FINDING REDEMPTION

Brian Curtis came from less than nothing. He and his wealthy best friend, Hunter, spend every night with a different woman, drinking and drugs. By day, Brian is a talented tattoo artist but by night he's a playboy bartender with a panty-dropping smile. He never sleeps with the same woman twice. He never remembers their names. And most importantly, he never get emotionally involved.

Until Hunter's half sister shows up in town.

Shiloh Stone and her best friend Melanie decide to ditch the cold winters in Massachusetts for the warm beaches of southern California. After losing her mother to cancer, Shiloh decides to spend her senior year in college closer to her brother. But, first, a much needed summer break by the beach is in order. Shiloh has always been too busy for serious relationships and she definitely isn't the one night stand kind of girl.

Brian can think of a lot of reasons to stay away from Shiloh: she's his best friend's sister, she's classy, she comes from money, and she's way too good for him. But, from the minute he meets her, Brian is hooked. Getting involved with her would mean having to let down his guard, divulge his dirty secrets, and learn to love and be loved. Or it could just lead to nothing but heart ache. Can Brian open his heart or will he risk losing everything – including his life?

### Table of Contents

Title Page

Synopsis

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Epilogue

About the Author

### Prologue

Brian

The clanging of the heavy steel door closing behind me was like a gong going off inside my head aggravating my pounding headache. Between the alcohol, drugs and beating from the night before I couldn't have pinpointed which was the culprit for the wretched state I was in. I could still smell the stink of old liquor on my clothes. Looking down I could see brown blood stains on the front of my tee shirt. Was that mine or the other guy's? I guess it didn't really matter. Right then all I wanted was some aspirin, a shower and my bed. Spending the night on a lumpy cot wasn't conducive to rest. Not to mention the other guy in the cell had snored so loudly all night that at one point I was ready to strangle him. Lucky for him, the body odor and putrid stink of vomit coming off him kept me at a distance.

Walking in a semi-daze I pushed open the glass door and stepped out of the police station to be met by blinding bright sunshine that reflected brutally off the white concrete steps. I narrowed my eyes and resisted the wave of nausea that came over me as a dagger of sharp pain stabbed through my skull. Okay, I probably could have done without that last fifth of bourbon. A whistle caught my attention.

"Whoa, man. You look like shit," came a voice I recognized. It was my best friend Hunter.

I gave him my middle finger.

"That's no way to treat a friend," he said lightly.

"Whatever," I replied. "Thanks for picking me up."

Hunter and I had been friends since high school. We came from different worlds. Hunter's father was a big time lawyer. They lived in this huge house in a gated community while I lived in a one bedroom apartment with my drunk ass mom. After some minor district restructuring unfortunately my apartment complex fell just inside the upper class school district. So, when school started I ended up at the same school as all the snobby kids. Not exactly fun. Among the socially advantaged I stuck out like a hooker in a convent. It was on the first day of my junior year that I had to set things straight. I may not have had money, but I wasn't going to let anyone fuck with me. So, when a couple of senior football players tried to haze me I showed them the error of their ways. I may have been younger than them but I knew how to hold my own. I'd grown up in a world where street fighting was a sport and I had learned from some of the toughest guys in my neighborhood how to defend myself. My freshman year in high school I started going to the run down old gym around the corner from my old school. After the first year of training I was taking down guys in their twenties who had been training for years. I guess you could say I just had knack for kicking ass. And I loved it.

So it was that on that first day at my new school that I ended up in a fight. That's when I met Hunter Stone. He wasn't like most of the other kids. Well, his dad was rich, but Hunter wasn't into the high end clothes and fancy cars. He rebelled against all of it. Just before the first guy was about to throw a punch at me I heard someone behind me say, "Oh hell yes." Then the guy was beside me with his fists up. Within minutes we were taking on five other guys, Hunter fighting right along side me until several teachers broke it up. Hunter grinned the whole way to the office. While we waited outside for the principal Hunter clapped me on the shoulder.

"Hey, I'm Hunter."

I tipped up my chin in a nod. "Brian."

We were both high on adrenaline from the fight and I recognized the familiar gleam in Hunter's eyes, the same one I always got when I was engaged in a fight. We had been like brothers since that day.

That was six years ago.

### Chapter 1

Brian

A loud knock on my bedroom door roused me from yet another stupor. I groaned and tried to pull the sheet over my head but met with resistance. I opened my eyes and saw blond hair lying across one of my pillows. I pulled the sheet a little harder exposing the girl's tits. She shifted slightly but didn't wake up. Her makeup was smudged around her eyes. Funny how she looked so hot the night before when she was going down on me, but now she sported that cheap floosy blotched makeup and tangled hair getup. Checking the clock I rubbed my hand down my face. It was four o'clock in the afternoon and I had to be at work in an hour.

Another rap on the door. "Wake up, man!" It was Hunter.

"Yeah. I'm awake," I replied. "Be out in a minute."

I reached into the drawer of my nightstand and pulled out a small plastic bag and a mirror. Sitting up with my back leaning against the wall I spread out a couple of lines on the mirror. A quick pick me up was just what I needed to get motivated. After a couple of minutes I was out of bed and headed to the bathroom. I decided I'd take a shower before dispatching the girl in my bed. I could still smell sex all over me.

Dressed in a pair of jeans and a band tee shirt I went back in my room.

"Get up," I demanded as I shook the girl's shoulder. I didn't even know her name.

She whined a little and tried to pull away. I shook her again.

"Hey! You have to go." I spoke louder and she opened her eyes.

"You don't have to yell," she said in a pouty voice.

I grabbed her clothes off the floor and tossed them to her. She had to leave. I never let a girl stay at my place when I wasn't there.

"Put your clothes on. I have to go, which means you have to go." There was no affection in my tone. She was just one of many nameless, faceless girls who had no qualms about having sex with me after a few drinks.

She started getting dressed huffing as if she were offended by my lack of sweet talk. I gathered my wallet and keys and waited for her to finish. She gave me an expectant look. What? Did she think I wanted some goodbye kiss or her number. Not gonna happen.

"So, I had fun last night," she said trying to sound seductive. She reached to put her arms over my shoulders and I grabbed her wrists pushing them back down.

"Yeah. Well, that was last night," I said indifferently.

She gave me a shy look as if she were such an innocent, sweet girl. "I could give you my number. We could do it again some time."

I was totally unaffected. I opened the door and motioned for her to leave. "I don't think so."

My cold response must have triggered her temper because she stomped out of the room and headed for the front door muttering something that sounded like "fucking asshole" under her breath.

"Have a nice life, sweetheart," Hunter called from the sofa where he was puffing on a bowl of weed.

She slammed the door and Hunter started laughing.

"Let me guess – she wants a repeat performance?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes and took the bowl he offered.

Hunter stood. "You ready to go?"

It was summer so the sun still shone brightly and the air was warm. We pulled up to the bar and I killed the engine.

"I still don't get why you bother working here," I said. "You're a fucking college graduate. Don't you want to do something with your life?"

Hunter had a sizable trust fund he received upon getting his degree. If it wasn't for him I'd probably be living in some dive. But, as it was, we shared a pretty decent place not far from the university. We bartended at Mac's, a local hang out for college students. It was actually a cool place to hang out because the owner brought in some great local bands.

Hunter opened his door. "Now why would I want to go work in some stuffy office wearing a suit when I can have fun picking up women at the bar?"

I couldn't argue. I actually liked it, too. Between the bar and the tattoo shop I was making pretty good money. I saved every penny I made after paying my bills so that I one day I could open my own tattoo shop. Hunter offered on a regular basis to loan me the upfront capital but I didn't want a hand out. The plan was that when I had half the start up money we would go into it as equal partners. Hunter would run the business side of it and I would do the ink.

"Well, if it isn't my two favorite trouble makers," Maureen, the owner of Mac's, called out as we walked inside.

She was only a couple of years older than us. She was striking with deep red hair and pale skin. More than a few times I had to step in to keep drunk hands off her. If I was into redheads I would have tried to score with her a long time ago. As it was, she was more like a sister to us now.

"Hey Maureen," Hunter pulled her into a hug. "How's business?"

"Kind of slow right now, but it should pick up in a couple of hours when the band gets going." She waved as she headed for the door. "Gotta run, guys. Got a hot date tonight."

"Then where are you going, honey?" Hunter called after her. "I'm right here!"

She laughed as she walked out.

Hunter and I were almost polar opposites when it came to our personalities. I was considered the strong, silent type while he was the life of the party. The chicks loved it.

There were only a couple of people sitting at the bar. I refilled one guy's beer then sat on one of the stools at the end of the bar, pulling out my sketch pad. I glanced up and saw Hunter flirting with an attractive woman who looked like she was old enough to be his mother. I shook my head, chuckling and got back to my drawing. After another hour and a half more people were filling up the place. The band was set to go on at nine. I put away my sketch pad and started filling drink orders. Tonight's act was going to be a hard rock girl band, so I expected the crowd to be favorable for some after work extracurricular activities.

By the time the band took the stage the bar was nearly packed and Hunter and I were staying busy. A girl with short black hair leaned up against the bar her breasts pushing up exposing her cleavage. I gave her a suggestive smile.

"What can I get for you?" I shouted over the music.

She raised an eyebrow not hiding the fact that she was checking me out and liked what she saw. I leaned a little closer.

"Nice tats," she said as she ran her index finger over my forearm.

"Thanks." I gave her my classic sex smile. The one that exposed the dimple in my left cheek.

"What time do you get off?" she asked. There was no mistaking the implication of her words. I chuckled. This was too easy.

"Any time you want," I answered.

She raised an eyebrow. "How about now?"

"Give me just a sec."

I walked over to Hunter. "Hey, I'm going to take a quick break. You got this?"

Hunter eyed the girl and smiled. "Yeah. But, make it quick."

I laughed. "I don't think that will be a problem. Do you see those lips?"

Hunter turned away laughing.

I motioned for the girl to follow me as I walked to the other end of the bar. We ducked into the door leading to a small office in the back. I sat down on one of the chairs by the desk folding my hands in my lap giving her an expectant look. She kneeled down in front of me and unbuttoned my jeans. I leaned up so she could pull them past my ass and down to my ankles. I was already getting hard watching her lick her glossy lips. I crooked my finger indicating for her to move her mouth closer.

"I've been fantasizing about having those beautiful lips around my cock since you walked in," I lied.

She smiled. "Well, I'll try to live up to your fantasy, then."

She ducked her head down and took the tip of my cock into her mouth. I fisted my hand in her hair and tugged her down further. Oh this definitely wasn't her first rodeo. The way she swirled her tongue as she bobbed her head up and down she was definitely experienced. I pushed my hips as she went down until I was deep in her throat. She made a small gagging noise and her saliva dripped down my balls but I kept fucking her mouth and she took it all in. I controlled the rhythm and pace until my scrotum tightened and I came into her mouth. With my head leaned back I stared at the ceiling until the pulsing stopped. Then I let go of her hair and she pulled away licking her lips. I stood and pulled my pants up.

"Thanks," I said before opening the door and ushering her out.

"Catch up with me after you get off work and we can finish what we started," she winked and turned to go toward the bathroom.

Yeah, I don't think so. I already finished. I let myself back behind the bar catching Hunter's knowing look. He grinned and gave me a high five. Yeah, so I'm a player? So what? What was I supposed to do when women made it that easy? I got back to work feeling a little more relaxed.

"Hey! Bartender!" A woman's voice called from behind me.

I turned and my breath hitched. Two women stood at the end of the bar. The one who called out was average height with medium length light brown hair. She was giving me the fuck me eyes. But it was her friend who caught my attention. Standing a couple inches shorter than her friend this girl was drop dead gorgeous with waist length pale blond hair sporting electric blue streaks in the front. She wore a black halter top that tied around the back of her neck and showed off a perfectly flat stomach. A guy leaned over her and whispered something in her ear. Her bored expression shifted and in the blink of an eye she cold cocked him in the jaw. I had to stop myself from laughing as I made my way toward them. Her face, in all its glory, still read don't fuck with me.

I stood before them my eyes honed in on the offending guy. "Is there a problem here?"

The guy gave me a scowl but decided not to follow through when I rubbed my fist into my palm with my eyes narrowed. I was actually a little disappointed. It had been a while since I'd worked out my frustration on someone's face. I made a mental note to spend more time at the gym.

I turned my attention to the little bombshell at the bar. "Nice hook," I complimented.

She tilted her head to the side and shrugged. "Thanks," she said casually.

Damn her voice was like honey making my cock twitch with one syllable. I gave myself a mental shake. Her friend leaned a little closer. I knew that stance and for some reason I wasn't interested. Maybe because I'd just gotten my rocks off. Or maybe because I was getting a hard on for her friend.

"So, what can I get for you ladies?" I asked ignoring the girl's blatant flirting.

"I'll have a – " the girl started.

"Holy shit!" Hunter yelled. He went around the other side of the bar and grabbed up the object of my attention into a big hug lifting her off her feet. "Shiloh, what the hell are you doing here? When did you get into town? And why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

Shiloh. Huh.

She hugged Hunter warmly and laughed. "I wanted to surprise you," she said.

She wore a smile that took my breath away.

Hunter set her back on her feet. "Hey, let me introduce you to my friend." He turned toward me and held out his hand. "Shiloh, this is my best friend, Brian. Brian, this is my sister, Shiloh."

Wait – what? This was Hunter's sister? How was it possible that the one time I get the wind knocked out of me just by seeing a girl it has to be my best friend's sister? He'd mentioned her a couple of times, but I'd never seen her. He seemed to not like talking about her. After Hunter's dad and step mom divorced when Hunter was fourteen, his stepmom and half sister moved to the east coast. Every so often Hunter would fly out to see her. Apparently they had been very close when they were younger, what with a father that was too busy for his family and a mother who pretty much stayed inebriated twenty-four seven. Now that I looked at them I could see the resemblance. They both had the same hair and eyes. That came from their dad. I realized I was relieved that this beautiful woman wasn't in some kind of relationship with my best friend.

I held out my hand. "Nice to meet you." I kept my voice even. No way was I going to let on how she was affecting me.

She took my hand and my knees nearly wobbled from the feel of her soft skin. "It's really nice to meet you, Brian. Hunter has told me so much about you." Her smile seemed to be genuine and I melted a little inside.

I chuckled. "Whatever he said about me it's all lies. Except the good stuff, of course. Anyway, I'm glad to finally meet Hunter's secret little sister."

Shiloh gave Hunter a playful punch in the arm. "What? Are you ashamed of me? I'm not the geeky little sister anymore."

Geeky? No way. This girl was so gorgeous and sexy, geeky isn't a word I would have even considered to describe her.

Hunter glanced past Shiloh and his attention was caught by her friend. The girl was definitely hot, but in my eyes she didn't hold a candle to Shiloh. Hunter smoothly stepped past his sister and extended his hand to her friend. She took it and he lifted it to his lips and kissed the top of it.

"And, who might you be?" he asked in his suave low voice.

I rolled my eyes and gave a little laugh. One thing about Hunter that was consistent was that he would flirt with any good looking girl if given the chance. And, he was usually successful, too. Girls went crazy over his California surfer good looks. His blond hair and light blue eyes hooked them and his charm reeled them in. Standing an even six feet tall he was only a couple of inches shorter than me with broad shoulders and muscles that gave testament to all the hours he spent lifting weights. He wasn't overly bulky but he was definitely cut. It was obvious that the woman whose hand he held appreciated his physique as she ran her eyes over his chest and arms. I was pretty sure he wouldn't have any qualms about scoring with her despite the fact that she was his sister's friend.

"Hunter, this is my friend Melanie," Shiloh said.

"It's very nice to meet you, Hunter," Melanie replied in a slightly husky voice.

Hunter grinned. "Really, the pleasure is all mine."

"Give your dick a rest, Hunter," Shiloh chided as she rolled her eyes.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Alright, alright." Hunter let go of Melanie's hand and turned to me. "Get them whatever they want. It's on me." He put an arm over Shiloh's shoulders. "It's my sister's twenty-first birthday and I plan to make it one that she'll never remember."

Shiloh and Melanie laughed. God damn Shiloh's laugh was so sexy. I could come just listening to her.

"Twenty-one, huh?" I asked her.

Her lips quirked into a half smile. "Yeah. Finally legal."

Yeah, but the way she looked should definitely be illegal.

"Well, what does the birthday girl want to drink?"

She scanned the bar then looked back to me. "I don't know. What do you recommend?"

I nearly choked at the thoughts running through my head.

"Oh no!" Hunter stepped between Shiloh and me. "That's dangerous territory you're wandering into."

I flashed a smile at Shiloh and her cheeks blushed a pretty pink. Yeah. I turned it on full power, dimple and all. She bit down on her lower lip nervously, but she still smiled back. I wanted to lick that bottom lip and suck it into my mouth so bad I was practically salivating.

I pushed Hunter aside. "Don't worry, bro. I'm not going to corrupt your sister." I turned my attention to her. "How about a lemon drop? It's a little bit tart, little bit sweet," I said licking my lips.

She blushed again. "Okay. Sounds good."

I fixed their drinks and watched intently as she tossed back the shot. I was mesmerized by her slim neck and the way her throat moved as she swallowed her drink. Every single move she made had me transfixed. I knew right then and there that this girl was some kind of witch because she had me under a spell. I also knew that she was my best friend's sister and there was no way I could go near her. Besides she was just visiting. Hell, she probably had a boyfriend waiting for her wherever she came from. A girl that stunning couldn't be single. He was probably respectable. Unlike myself. But, to be totally honest, the real reason I had to stay away from her was because there was no doubt in my mind that I was no good for her.

### Chapter 2

Shiloh

I spotted Hunter as soon as we were in eyeshot of the bar. I smiled as I watched him flirting with a pretty redhead while he made her a drink. She laughed at something he said then took the drink he held out. She slid a napkin toward him and he grinned as he slipped it into his pocket. Melanie and I stepped up to the bar on the opposite end so he wouldn't see us yet. I wanted to surprise him. It had been over two years since we'd seen each other and in that time I had gone through a complete transformation. I traded in my glasses for Lasik, my sweatpants and tee shirts for fashion, and even put on a little makeup. The blue streaks in my hair were just temporary. It was an impulse decision earlier in the day. I thought it would be fun since Melanie and I were going out for my birthday. The package said it would wash out.

"Hey! Bartender!" Melanie shouted.

A tall guy with dark brown hair turned toward us. Gulp. Oh. My. God. I was certain I had never seen a guy so unbelievably gorgeous in my life. And, that's saying something considering my own brother was a heartthrob. But, this guy had my pulse racing and my heart was beating so hard I was sure it would burst. He was wearing a faded tee shirt that fit just right. His jeans hung low on his waist. His entire upper body was ripped with lean muscles. His dark hair was short but so sexy in a tousled bedhead sort of way. I clenched my fingers into a ball to prevent myself from reaching out to touch it. Keeping my poker face I examined every inch of his exposed arms. They were covered with tattoos. There was even some ink peeking out of the collar of his shirt and along the back of his neck. And, damn did he wear it well. I had never seen tattoos look so sexy. He half smiled when he saw us and I had to swallow hard seeing the dimple in his left cheek. There should be laws against looking that hot.

A hand resting on the small of my back distracted me from the gorgeous bartender. A guy leaned close to my ear and slurred, "You wanna dance?"

He smelled like stale beer and cigarettes and his palm was sweaty against my skin making my stomach turn. I had a weird thing about physical boundaries. I didn't like being touched by strangers. Especially of the intoxicated male variety. So my gut reaction was to strike. I nailed him in the jaw with my fist. Oops.

Sexy bartender looked amused as though he was going to laugh. When he reached our end of the bar he glared at the guy behind me who was rubbing his jaw.

"Is there a problem here?" His voice was low and a chill ran down my spine.

For a second I thought the guy was going to challenge the bartender, which judging from his size and physique, seemed like a really stupid idea. Something about the way the bartender held himself and palmed his fist told me he probably wouldn't have any trouble taking sweaty drunk guy out. But, it was the look in his light hazel eyes that actually made me draw in a sharp breath. His eyes said that not only would he pummel the guy, he would enjoy doing it. It was a menacing eagerness. I guess sweaty drunk guy got the message loud and clear because he backed away and disappeared into the crowd. In an instant, the look in the bartender's eyes switched back to sexy amusement.

"Nice hook," he said to me.

For a split second my voice was strangled in my throat. Poker face. Poker face. 'Thanks." I'm pretty sure I pulled off nonchalant. At the very least aloof. I hoped.

I glanced at Melanie. She was blatantly checking out the bartender. Not that I could blame her. It was obvious he noticed. He probably got that kind of attention all the time. Glancing down the bar I noticed several other women ogling him. No surprise there. He far and away was the most drop dead sexiest guy in the entire bar. Hell, maybe in the entire state of California.

"So what can I get for you ladies?" He directed the question at both of us, but his eyes never left mine. A shiver went up my spine.

Melanie started to answer but was cut off by my brother's boisterous voice. Hunter came running around the bar and picked me up in a bear hug.

"Holy shit! Shiloh, what the hell are you doing here? When did you get into town? And why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

I couldn't help laughing at his excitement. For such a big strong guy he still acted like a boy. I hugged him back fiercely. I had missed him so much. His smile was infectious and I grinned back at him.

"I wanted to surprise you," I said.

He set me down then turned to the bartender. "Hey, let me introduce you to my friend. Shiloh, this is my best friend, Brian. Brian, this is my sister, Shiloh."

Brian held out his hand and I shook it. His hand enveloped mine. It was strong yet gentle. My stomach flip flopped.

"Nice to meet you," he said.

So this was Brian. "It's really nice to meet you, Brian. Hunter has told me so much about you." He failed to mention that his best friend happened to be the most gorgeous guy on the damn planet.

He chuckled and the throaty sound sent heat between my legs.

"Whatever he said about me it's all lies. Except the good stuff, of course. Anyway, I'm glad to finally meet Hunter's secret little sister."

For some reason that bothered me. Did Hunter think I wasn't good enough for his friend? I mean, I know it has been a couple years since he's seen me, and admittedly I've changed a lot in that time. But, it wasn't like I was some ugly girl that needed to be hidden away from the public. And, the way Hunter spoke about Brian it was like he was his brother. Although he did mention a few times that Brian was a player. Maybe he was just being an overprotective big brother. I needed to stop overanalyzing it. So, I smiled and clocked him in the arm.

"What? Are you ashamed of me? I'm not the geeky little sister anymore."

In typical Hunter fashion he avoided the topic by catching sight of Melanie. When it came to pretty girls, Hunter had ADD. I recognized the change in his expression. He turned it on like a switch. One second he's boyish and brotherly, the next he's Casanova.

"And who might you be?" he asked her in his sex her up voice.

I rolled my eyes. Apparently some things hadn't changed. I made introductions and watched for a few minutes while my brother and Melanie shamelessly flirted. Okay, enough with the soap opera. It was my twenty-first birthday and I was ready to have some fun.

"Give your dick a rest, Hunter," I rolled my eyes again and nudged him with my elbow.

"Alright, alright." Hunter let go of Melanie's hand, draped an arm over my shoulders and turned to Brian. "Get them whatever they want. It's on me. It's my sister's twenty-first birthday and I plan to make it one that she'll never remember."

I laughed. One of the things I loved most about my brother was his ability to make me laugh. It's like he had this contagious humor and light heartedness.

"Twenty-one, huh?" Brian asked.

Did he work to look that sexy or was that just the way he looked naturally? And, how could a few simple words cause my heart to skip?

"Yeah. Finally legal." I almost groaned in embarrassment. I hoped I didn't sound as flirty as I suspected I did.

"Well, what does the birthday girl want to drink?"

I looked at all the bottles lining the back of the bar. It wasn't that I never drank before, but usually I preferred beer. Melanie had insisted that we get more creative since I could now officially drink. I gazed longingly at the wide variety of imported brews on tap. Maybe I would just have a couple of shots then get back to my favorite.

I shrugged. "I don't know what do you recommend?"

Hunter stepped in front of me, "Oh no! That's dangerous territory you're wandering into."

I peeked around his shoulder and my heart stopped. Brian had a wide smile on his face. He was utterly breathtaking. Every ounce of poker face I had slipped away. I suddenly felt extremely nervous and shy. Biting my lower lip I tried to hold back a smile. My cheeks were on fire further contributing to my embarrassment.

Brian shoved Hunter out of the way. "Don't worry, bro. I'm not going to corrupt your sister. How about a lemon drop? It's a little bit tart, little bit sweet,"

His tongue darted over his lips. Did he really just do that? I had an overwhelming urge to lick him. The damn guy was wreaking havoc on my hormones. My cheeks were probably bright red and I couldn't come up with anything witty.

"Okay. Sounds good." Lame.

Brian turned away to make our drinks and I was given a small reprieve. Hunter left Melanie and I to take more drink orders. We downed our shots. I had to admit it was pretty tasty.

"You have to choose the next shot," I said to Melanie.

"Hmmm...let me think," she replied.

"While you're thinking about it I'll take care of a couple other customers," Brian said. "I'll check back with you in a couple minutes."

I nodded. As he walked away I couldn't keep my eyes from staring at his perfect ass. The band came back from their break and within minutes the music was blaring again. The beat got me energized so I grabbed Melanie by the arm.

"Let's go dance," I shouted so she could hear me.

After several songs I was sweating and breathing hard. I stepped away from the dance floor and stood off to the side watching the band. I nearly jumped out of my skin when a warm hand curved around my arm. I swirled around and gasped when I was mere inches from Brian's chest. I looked up and he raised his arms in surrender.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." In one of his hands he held a bottle of water. He handed it to me. "You looked like you could use some hydration."

I took the bottle and chugged the cold water grateful for the refreshment. "Thanks. I definitely needed that."

"Did you ever decide what you wanted to drink?" he asked.

I glanced at the bar then back at him. "Honestly, I really wanted to try some of those imports you guys have on tap." I shrugged almost apologetically. "I'm really more of a beer fan than liquor."

He grinned and seemed to be pleased. "Perfect. Dark or light?"

"Definitely dark."

He gave me thumbs up. "I'll be right back."

I watched as he walked through the crowd back to the bar. A tall brunette wearing a halter top and shorts that barely covered the essentials stepped into his path. She put her hands on his chest and moved her body so that they were pressed together. Her long legs looked like they should be on a runway. Brian's hand landed on her waist and he leaned down and whispered something to her. She giggled and one of her hands reached around to grab his ass. It was stupid, but for some reason that bothered me. I forced myself to look away and remember what Hunter had said about his friend. The guy was a player. He probably had a different girl every night. I shoved that thought out of my head and focused on the band. Melanie was having a great time dancing with yet another good looking guy. I watched her and smiled. She could have any of these guys eating out of the palm of her hand.

The band switched tempo and started playing a ballad. A frosty glass with deep brown liquid and a thick foam head materialized in front of me. I nearly squealed with delight.

Brian laughed. "I don't think I've ever seen someone get so excited over a beer before."

I took a long drink. "This is so good!"

"It's from Belgium. It's one of my favorites."

I drank some more. "I can see why. It's delicious."

He shuffled his feet and ran a hand through his hair. Was he nervous about something?

"So, I was wondering if maybe you'd like to dance?"

He was nervous! How adorable. Wait. Did he just ask me to dance? A swarm of butterflies fluttered around my stomach.

"Uh, sure." I could smack myself in the forehead. I sounded so stupid.

He gave me that cute half smile, took my beer and set it on the table beside me. He took one of my hands and led me closer to the dance floor. He stopped in an open space and turned to me. His arm curved around my waist and he pulled me to him. Instinctively my hands went up to his arms. It was like my hands were magnetically drawn to him. I could feel the hard lines of his body pressed against mine. As if it had a mind of it's own, one of my thumbs traced an outline of one of his tattoos. He wrapped his other arm behind me locking his hands together. His skin was warm against mine where it was exposed above my waistline. I slowly inhaled trying to calm my nerves. He smelled so incredible. Like aftershave and Irish Spring soap. It made me a little dizzy.

"So, how long are you going to be in town?" he asked.

I had to lean my head back to look up at his beautiful face. I was only five feet four inches tall and he had to be six two. Something about the height difference made me feel feminine and pretty.

"Well..." I paused. "You can't say anything to my brother yet, okay?"

He raised a brow. "A secret huh?"

I nodded.

"You promise you won't tell?"

"I promise. You can trust me." He made an X over his heart before returning his hand to my back.

I narrowed my eyes as if I was contemplating whether to believe him or not. He rolled his eyes in return.

"I promise! I won't say a word," he reassured me.

"Okay, okay. The thing is, I'm moving here for good. I've already transferred to the university for my senior year," I explained.

His eyebrow went up again. "Really?"

I nodded again. "Yep. Melanie and I decided we were sick of the cold Massachusetts winters, so we figured what better place to go than southern California. And, I get to see Hunter more often. It's a win-win."

"I'm sure he'll be pleasantly surprised," he said.

"We already found an apartment near campus." I could feel the excitement bubbling inside me. "We wanted to come out here early so we could spend the summer having some fun at the beach."

"When were you planning to let Hunter know?" he asked.

"Probably later on tonight," I replied. Then I got a great idea. "Hey! Do you think you guys could help us get our stuff moved in?" I squeezed his arm. "We could use a couple of big, strong guys."

He laughed. "In town for a few hours and you're already using me, huh?"

My cheeks flushed at his insinuation but I managed to put on my best puppy dog face. "Pleeeeease?"

### Chapter 3

Brian

Oh hell. I was so fucked. I was already putty in the girl's hands from the moment she stepped into the bar. Now she looked up at me with those baby blues begging me to help her move her stuff into her apartment. I'd fucking move a mountain if she asked me to. When she said she was staying here my heart soared and plummeted at the same time. I had no doubt I wanted this girl. There was something about her that called to me like a siren's song. The way she felt in my arms. When her thumb traced along my tattoo it sent fire up my arm. With every breath I inhaled her scent of flowers with an undertone of some kind of sweet fruit. Maybe strawberries. Whatever it was it lit me up like an inferno.

Being this close to her I could see just how incredibly beautiful she was. Her skin was lightly tanned and smooth as silk. Her hair brushed across the tops of my hands making me want to run my fingers through it. Her eyes were bright and she wore very little makeup. Not that she needed it. When I brought her beer to her I couldn't help noticing the little white shorts she wore. I admit my eyes lingered on her legs and ass for more than a few seconds. She had curves in all the right places. Her legs and arms were toned. I wondered if she worked out or was she just naturally perfect. And, she loved beer. Good beer. So far, the only imperfection I could see was that she was my best friend's sister.

Stay away. Stay away. Stay away. My new mantra. There was no way I could get involved with her. She was sunshine and beauty. I would ruin her if I got near her. And to prove just how much of a pathetic asshole I was I caved to her request anyway by justifying it in my mind that I was practically obligated to help out my best friend's sister. That may not sound like a dick move, but what makes it so is that in reality I only wanted to help her because I wanted to be near her, and that was as good an excuse as any. That's how the slippery slope gets started. And, I had a feeling someone was going to end up crash landing at the bottom.

"No problem," I said casually as if it were no big thing. "We both have tomorrow off, so we should be able to help out."

She threw her arms around my neck. "Thank you so much!"

Yep. I was totally fucked.

I kept the beers coming for the rest of the night until Shiloh had practically taken a beer tour around the world. She sat at the bar talking to Hunter and me while her friend danced and partied with the band. In a matter of hours I learned that Shiloh was a psychology major. She knew how to play one song on the piano, chopsticks. She loved to swim and had been on the swim team at her last school. That explained the great legs. She had always wanted to learn how to surf, to which Hunter immediately offered to take her out on a board promising she'd be a pro by the end of the summer. And she had a tattoo. Of course, I wanted to see it, so she put her foot up on the bar (she'd had a lot of beer by that time) and took off her sandal. On the top of her foot was a small dolphin. Okay, not original in any way, but on her it was perfect.

"You know, I could add some water to that if you want," I offered.

Her eyes lit up. "Really? You know how to tattoo people?"

Hunter let out a loud laugh. "You should see some of the work he does. He even did one on his own leg. Gave me my first tat."

Hunter pulled up the back of his shirt to show off his ink. It was a shoulder piece with a tribal design. Pretty simple, but it looked pretty cool and the chicks thought it was hot. In fact, a few were staring at him as we spoke. Hunter noticed, of course. He pulled his shirt down and sauntered over to a very hot redhead who was unwrapping him like man candy with her eyes. It only took a couple of minutes before I knew he had sealed the deal. Hunter always did have a weakness for gingers. I rang the bell for last call and poured one more beer for Shiloh. It was obvious that she had a good buzz but for someone so small she held her alcohol like a champ. Most girls would have been falling off the bar stool after that many high gravity beers. Like brother like sister, I guessed. I realized at that moment that it was the first night since I worked at the bar that I hadn't had even a sip of alcohol. I'd been so focused on Shiloh that it hadn't really occurred to me.

"Hey Hunter!" I called. "I'm gonna run to the back for some supplies.

Hunter knew what I was talking about and gave me a nod.

Once in the storage room I pulled out a vial and snorted a couple of lines. Yeah. That would get me through closing and clean up. I grabbed a few things for restocking the bar on my way out. On the way back to the bar I ran into (literally) the black haired little pixie from earlier. She ran a finger down my chest. I could see promises of a wild night in her eyes. Hell. Why not? She gave good head and seemed to be a little on the kinky side with the piercings and tats. Besides, I'd been so distracted all night I hadn't made the time to hook something up for later. She told me her name, which I promptly forgot and said she'd be waiting for me when I was finished with work. She reached up and kissed me pushing her tongue in my mouth while stroking the front of my jeans. Yeah. She would do.

As soon as I saw Shiloh sitting next to Hunter at the bar I felt guilty. The pixie took a seat at the end of the bar waiting for me. For the first time in my life I was conflicted about taking a chick home. I poured a shot of bourbon, gulped it down then poured another. I was determined to lose my conscience. I wasn't the guy who fell for a girl in a day. Especially not that kind of girl. I didn't do personal and I definitely didn't do my best friend's sister. There was no way I was hooking up with Shiloh in this lifetime. Hunter would try to kick my ass. And I'd probably let him.

Hunter spotted me. "Hey Brian, guess what?"

I stared at him waiting for whatever news he was going to spill that had his eyes lit up. I had feeling I knew what was coming so I feigned ignorance.

"Shiloh just told me that she and Melanie are moving here permanently. Isn't that awesome?"

Hunter looked pleased and I was happy for him. Yeah, it was awesome. Awesome and terrifying at the same time.

I raised my eyebrows like I was surprised. "Is that so? Well, welcome to California."

I poured another shot and downed it.

"Go easy tonight, man," Hunter said. "I've volunteered us to help them move in tomorrow."

Shiloh yawned. Damn she was cute. I tossed my keys across the bar and Hunter caught them.

"You should take them home," I said. "I've got a ride." I tilted my head toward the pixie.

Hunter grinned knowingly. I finished stocking, had another shot and waved to Hunter and Shiloh.

"Nice meeting you Shiloh. I'll see you guys tomorrow."

"Yeah. Nice meeting you, too." Her voice sounded a little deflated. Or maybe it was my imagination.

I motioned for pixie to join me and she hopped down from her seat. Throwing an arm over her shoulder I gave one more wave and we left the bar.

"Let's go to your place," I told her.

The rest of the night went by in a blur of cocaine, liquor and sex. All in all it was pretty good time. Pixie had fallen asleep a half hour ago. I got out of bed, threw on my clothes and left her apartment. I took a cab back to my apartment and let myself in the front door.

"Looks like you had a good night," Hunter greeted me. He was way to chipper for seven in the morning. He was drinking coffee and it looked like he'd already showered and dressed.

I grabbed a beer out of the fridge taking a long chug. "Looks like you didn't."

"Ha ha. That's very funny," Hunter smirked. "I only refrained for one night because of my sister. Thanks for making her feel welcome, by the way. I'm sure it will take a little time for her to adjust and make some friends."

"Yeah. No problem. She seems pretty cool." I wanted to change the subject. "How long before you hook up with Melanie?"

Hunter grinned. "I could ask you the same thing."

I laughed. "Nah. You can have her. She seemed more into you anyway."

Were we really talking about his sister's best friend like she was one of our conquests?

"Maybe she's into threesomes," Hunter replied.

Yes. Yes, we were. And, Hunter didn't seem to care at all. Were we really that depraved? I didn't need to answer that.

"What time are we supposed to be going over there?" I asked.

Hunter put his empty mug in the sink. "In an hour."

I tossed my empty bottle in the trash. "I'm gonna take a shower. You want to grab something to eat on the way over?"

"Yeah. Sounds good."

The hot water raining over me felt like heaven. I closed my eyes and let it wash away last night's debauchery. Pixie girl had been a freak in the sack, which was fine by me. But, it wasn't her I was seeing on the backs of my eyelids this morning. Long blond hair and crystal blue eyes danced around my head. I was already rock hard at just the thought of her. That was the first time I jacked off thinking about Shiloh. And I knew it wouldn't be the last.

### *****

"Hey guys," Shiloh greeted cheerfully opening the door to let us into her apartment. She stood there looking like an angel. Her hair, minus the blue streaks, was pulled up into a high ponytail. She wore a simple white tee shirt and a pair of denim shorts that revealed more of her thighs than I was prepared to deal with that early in the morning. Her face was clean and devoid of any makeup. Her cheeks were naturally blushed pale pink, eyes bright blue framed with thick lashes. Her expression was open and light. She was even more beautiful than I remembered.

How was she so fresh and lively after drinking half the night? My headache was just starting to subside after taking a couple of Percocets and doing a few lines. I didn't drink coffee and with no sleep since the afternoon before I had to have something to keep me going. We stepped into the empty living room. There was a breakfast bar separating it from a small kitchen. Hunter set the cardboard tray with a couple of coffees on the counter.

"We brought coffee," he said.

"Oh thank god," Melanie moaned as she trudged into the kitchen from the hallway. She clutched her forehead and reached for one of the cups of coffee as if it were a pot of gold.

Hunter chuckled. "Rough night?"

Melanie gave him her middle finger and sipped the hot brew then sighed appreciatively.

Shiloh giggled. "She'll be fine after the coffee kicks in." She motioned for them to follow her. "Come on. The moving van is right outside."

After several hours of hauling furniture and rearranging it several times until the girls were satisfied, Hunter and I were saying our goodbyes. By that time, I was so exhausted that my eyes were on fire and I felt like a zombie.

"So, do you guys want to stay for dinner?" Shiloh asked.

"Yeah sure," Hunter said before I could protest.

I leaned my head back on the couch and closed my eyes.

### *****

I was surrounded by darkness. The only sound was the light ticking of the second hand of a clock. I waited for my eyes to adjust, completely disoriented. Was I still at pixie's house? I sat up and realized my feet were bare and there was a blanket laying across my legs. Then it came back to me. Hunter and I had spent the day helping his sister and her friend get moved into their apartment. The last thing I remembered was Hunter accepting an invitation to have dinner with them. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and checked the time. It was three in the morning. I had been asleep for nearly twelve hours. I threw the blanket off me and stood, stretching. I pulled on my boots and grabbed my keys from my other pocket. Twenty minutes later I was back in my own room. I stripped off my clothes and fell into bed. The last thing I saw was Shiloh's face in my mind before I fell back to sleep.

### Chapter 4

Shiloh

Hunter tried to wake Brian but he was out cold.

"You should just let him sleep," I suggested.

I grabbed a blanket from one of the open boxes in the hallway while Hunter took off Brian's boots and lay him across the couch. Even with the movement Brian didn't stir. I draped the blanket over his legs.

"Let's have something to eat and then I'll give you a ride home," I told my brother. "Brian can crash here."

"You don't have to do that," Hunter said. "I can carry him out to the car when we're done eating."

I waved him off. "Don't worry about it. He's obviously exhausted. Just leave him be."

By the time we finished dinner and I returned from dropping Hunter back at his place it was close to ten o'clock at night. I was tired and ready to go to bed. Melanie had already crashed, so I turned the light off in the kitchen before heading toward the hallway. I caught a glimpse of Brian sprawled out on the couch as I was passing by. The blanket had slipped to the floor. I went into the living room and picked the blanket up, laying it back over him. The lamp on the end table cast a soft glow across his face. He looked so peaceful sleeping. His breathing was slow and even. I sat on the coffee table just staring at him. It was as though I was mesmerized by how beautiful he was. His perfectly straight narrow nose, thick dark lashes fanning out below his eyes, the shadow of light stubble along his jaw. He was absolutely stunning.

I couldn't help thinking about him leaving with the cute brunette at the bar the night before. I know it's irrational, but when he put his arm over her shoulder I couldn't help feeling disappointed. He had spent the whole evening paying attention to me. He seemed to actually be genuinely interested when I talked to him. And when we danced, the way it felt to have his strong arms wrapped around me – just the thought still made me flush as I looked down at his sleeping form.

Brian shifted throwing his arm in an arc above his head. I almost jumped at the slight disturbance in the quiet of the room. His shirt rode up several inches exposing part of his waist and abdomen. I stared at the indentation on each side of his waist that tapered toward his jeans in the shape of a V. His sculpted abs were covered in more tattoos and I wondered just how much of his body was inked. From the little I could see the one on his stomach was black without color. Heat rose in my cheeks as my eyes trailed further down past his belt.

I had only been with one guy and even then it was awkward and far from sexy. It wasn't even as erotic as just looking at Brian's stomach. I know, pretty pathetic. Something about him made my stomach tighten, my skin overheat and my spine shiver. No wonder women threw themselves at him. Hell, I was practically drooling just watching him sleep. Oh my god! I was sitting there on the coffee table watching my brother's best friend sleep on my couch! What was wrong with me acting so creepy?

Just as I was about stand Brian's arm flopped across my knees, his hand landing in my lap. I sat frozen on that spot gaping at his fingers resting on my thigh. Warmth radiated from his palm and traveled right up my leg to more intimate places. How could an accidental touch by this man cause me to get that hot and bothered? His hand flexed and he murmured something incoherent. As gently as I could I picked up his hand and slowly eased it back, placing it on his stomach. As I reached over to turn off the lamp I heard his voice whisper.

"Shiloh."

My heart skidded to a stop. I looked down and saw that his eyes were still closed and there was movement beneath his lids. He was dreaming. Was he dreaming of me? I shook my head and quickly turned off the light banishing the tiny glimmer of hope at that prospect before I let it take root. Brian couldn't possibly fantasize about his best friend's little sister. Walking back to my room I felt dismayed by the thought that Brian had probably only paid so much attention to me at the bar because I was Hunter's sister. He probably felt obligated to make me feel welcome. It probably wouldn't take long for him to be treating me like a little sister, too. Better to get the guy out of my thoughts ASAP.

### *****

So, I'll admit, I was a little disappointed when I woke up the next morning and Brian was gone. I quickly pushed those thoughts aside and busied myself with unpacking. By midafternoon I was finished putting away the last items when my phone rang. It was Hunter.

"Hey Hunter," I answered.

"Hey! How's the unpacking going?" he asked.

"Just finished. What are you up to today?"

"Nothing much. Listen. I'm going to this party tonight and was wondering if you guys wanted come."

He didn't say we. But, maybe that didn't mean anything. I mean, chances were good that he and Brian would both be going, right?

"Umm, sure. I'll ask Melanie." Covering the mouth piece I called for her and she came into my room. "Hunter wants to know if we want to go to a party tonight."

"Hunter, huh? You know I won't turn down that invitation." She winked.

I laughed and put the phone back to my ear. "Melanie says she's in."

"Great! I'll pick you up at eight," Hunter replied.

We pulled up a long driveway and I was shocked when the enormous house came into view. There were so many cars parked on the lawn it looked like a parking lot. I looked down at my short shorts and tank top and felt completely underdressed.

"Are you sure I shouldn't have dressed up a little bit?" I asked Hunter.

"Nah. You look great. Don't let the big fancy house bother you. Half the people here will probably be wearing swimsuits anyway."

Melanie had chosen a very fitting mini-dress that fit like a glove. I was pretty sure she did it to catch Hunter's eye. And it worked. The minute he took one look at her his face lit up.

We walked into the open front door greeted by loud music and people everywhere. Hunter had one arm over my shoulder and another over Melanie's. A couple of guys eyed us then gave Hunter the thumbs up. He didn't bother to set them straight. I shook my head and rolled my eyes. We grabbed some drinks on our way out to the back patio. The back of the house faced the ocean. A slate tiled patio surrounded a massive sparkling swimming pool. Off to the side a temporary stage had been set up and a band was playing music. Some people were dancing while others swam. A couple of the lounges were occupied by couples making out. We milled around and Hunter introduced us to people. A couple of guys tried hitting on me, but Hunter gave them a threatening look and they backed off.

"Hunter! You can't keep acting like a guard dog. I'm a grown adult. I can flirt with guys if I want to."

He sighed. "I know. I know. It's just that I missed out on getting to be the protective older brother. I just wanted to try it out.," he explained. "Besides, I know those guys and they're only looking to get laid."

I scoffed. "Isn't that what all of you are trying to do at a party?"

He gave me a look as if he was offended and I raised my eyebrow at him. He'd been approached by tons of girls in the past hour and he was thriving on the sexual attention. Speaking of which, two leggy blonds wearing bikinis sidled up to him at that moment. I laughed and patted him on the arm.

"Have fun, big brother. I'm going to mingle."

I knew my brother was popular with the ladies. I also knew he was probably as much of a player as he claimed Brian was. But I didn't hold it against him. I figured one day he would grow out of it. I watched as Melanie danced with a guy she met at the outside bar. Melanie was used to guys being attracted to her. She had always been pretty and her outgoing personality was contagious. Me? I had only gotten pretty in the past year. Before that I was basically a nerd. It was still strange for me when guys tried to pick me up instead of always making a bee line for my best friend. I sat on a chair near the band and watched them play. They were pretty good. I couldn't help my fingers strumming as the lead guitarist played solo for a few minutes. It was an old habit that seemed ingrained in my reflexes. I hadn't picked up a guitar in over a year but sometimes the urge to play was still as strong as it had been then.

When the set was over the singer announced they were taking a break and would be back in a half hour.

"Do you play?" a masculine voice came from behind me.

I looked up and saw that it was the guitar player from the band.

"Not much anymore," I replied.

He put out a hand and I shook it. "My name is Matt," he introduced.

"Shiloh," I returned.

He was attractive with light brown hair and green eyes. He was tall and slim. I noticed he had a couple of tattoos on his forearms and an image of Brian flashed in my mind.

"So, Shiloh, I noticed you playing air guitar earlier. Is there a reason you don't play much anymore?"

I shrugged. "Guess I just haven't had time." It was as good an excuse as any.

He gave me a friendly smile. "You should make time if it's something you really love."

Another one of the band members came up behind Matt and slapped him on the back.

"Stop harassing the guests," he said jovially. He turned to me. His eyes traveled the length of my body slowly. "Hey. I'm Paul."

"Shiloh. You have a great voice Paul."

He beamed. "Thanks! Are you having fun?"

I nodded. "Yeah. I really enjoyed listening to your band. You guys are really good."

"You hear that, Matt? We might have our first fan. And a sexy one at that!"

Matt laughed. I felt like I was missing something. They both looked up as a velvet voice whispered in my ear. Matt smiled and Paul frowned.

"Are these guys bothering you?"

My breath caught and flames blazed in my gut. Brian. I turned and his face was so close our noses almost touched. He smiled and winked.

"Hey Brian!" Matt said. "You're late buddy."

They clapped each other's hands together quickly.

"I haven't seen you in the shop in a while, Matt. What gives?"

Matt rubbed the toe of his shoe across the ground. "Sorry man. We just got back a few days ago. Been touring for a few months."

"Well, don't be a stranger," Brian said. "I've got some pretty cool designs you should check out."

Matt nodded. "Definitely. I'm dying to get a shoulder piece done soon."

Paul tapped Matt on the arm. "Gotta get back, man." He turned to me. "Nice to meet you Shiloh."

I smiled as they walked away.

Brian pointed to my cup. "You need another beer?"

"You don't have to be my bartender, Brian."

"Pfft...please. I'm just making sure no other guy gets you a drink."

I stood and put my hands on my hips. "Did Hunter put you up to this?"

He took a step back and put his hands up. "Hey! I just got here. I haven't even seen Hunter. Seriously, I was just being nice."

I eyed him a few moments more and decided he was being honest. "Alright, I guess I'll take another beer then."

He took my hand. "Come on, I know where the owner keeps the good stuff."

I followed him into the house and he led me to a door. He opened the door to a set of stairs that looked like led to a basement.

"Down there?"

He smiled over his shoulder. "Yeah. He's got a whole fridge full of imports downstairs. Trust me. You won't regret it."

I sighed. "Alright, but if you're wrong you owe me a case of that Belgian beer you gave me the other night."

He gave a quick nod. "Deal."

At the bottom of the stairs Brian turned on a light and my jaw dropped. In the center of the room was a pool table. A foosball table and air hockey game were on either side of the room. On the back wall was a huge flat screen. In the console beneath that was every gaming system known to the modern world with shelves of video games on either side. A plush leather sofa faced the TV. On the opposite end of the room was an actual bar. The side walls were lined with various instruments including several guitars.

I laughed. "This is awesome!"

Brian went behind the bar and pulled a dark beer out of the cooler.

"I told you."

"Who's place is this?" I asked as I admired the guitars.

"It's Paul's house," he replied handing me the beer.

"Paul? As in the guy I met just a few minutes ago?"

"Yeah. Their band made it big a couple of years ago. The guys have been coming into the shop to get work done for a couple of years."

I grinned. "So you tattoo celebrities, then?"

He laughed. "Well, they weren't celebrities when they first came in, but, yeah I guess I do."

"Have you tattooed any other famous people?"

He gave me a sly look. "Maybe."

"Can I see some of your work sometime?"

He sat down on the couch and propped his leg on the table. "Come here."

I sat next to him and he pulled his jean leg up exposing his lower leg. On the inner portion of his calf was an intricate design of two hands clasped together with a strap wrapped around their wrists holding them tight. The detail was amazing. Underneath the hands the word 'brothers' was written in bold script.

"You did that on yourself?"

"Yeah. It was one of my first. When I started as an apprentice I had to find people to work on. Hunter has one just like it."

I saw the seriousness in his eyes and it tugged at my heart. He and Hunter really were more like brothers and I could tell that Brian placed enormous value on that relationship.

"It's really great. I can't imagine being able to tattoo yourself and keep your hand steady, though. I mean, didn't it hurt?"

He laughed. "Yeah, it did."

"What about your other tattoos. Did you design all of those?"

"I only put my own designs on my body. I draw them and the guy I work with does the ink."

"Is your whole body covered?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Did you really want to know, or are you just trying to get me to take my clothes off."

My cheeks flushed bright red. Partly because of embarrassment and partly because the thought of Brian taking his clothes off was very appealing.

He nudged me with his elbow. "I'm just playing Shiloh." Seeing my embarrassment, he changed the subject. "I saw you checking out the guitars. Do you play?"

"I used to," I answered fidgeting with the label on my bottle.

"Hmmm...I sense a story there."

"I've just been busy with school, ya know."

He narrowed his eyes. "Okay. You don't have to tell me tonight."

He stood and I worried for a minute that he was going to leave. Instead he walked over and took an acoustic guitar down from the wall. He came back to the couch and sat down adjusting the strings. Before he strummed the guitar he looked up at me.

"You have to promise not to laugh," he said very seriously.

"You play?" I asked incredulously. Be still my heart!

"Promise."

I nodded enthusiastically. "I promise."

He fumbled with the strings for a few moments, then started to play. I'm not sure what I was expecting, maybe a hard rock jam, but the music filling the room was slow and sad. He closed his eyes and hummed. I could almost picture the notes floating from each place his fingers touched. My own fingers fluttered involuntarily. I imagined an accompaniment of violins, soft woodwind instruments and a piano. I watched him as he played unable to tear my eyes away from his face. He was so engrossed in it that I wondered if he had taken a mental trip to another place. I felt my eyes prickle with tears.

When he finished he set the guitar aside and took a long drink of his beer. I was still sitting there stunned when he looked back at me. His hand reached out and touched my cheek.

"Hey. What's wrong?" His voice was soft and filled with concern.

I shook my head. "Nothing. That was beautiful."

### Chapter 5

Brian

Damn! I'd gone and made her cry. What an idiot!

"Maybe we should head back up to the party," I suggested.

"Actually, would you mind giving me a ride home?" she asked.

Fuck! Whatever I did had pushed her away. I should have left that damn guitar hanging on the wall. Now I'd fucked up and upset her.

"I'll find Hunter if you want to leave," I offered.

She looked up at me. "Don't bother him. He's probably busy right about now. I mean, if you want to stay I can call a cab. It's no big deal."

A cab? Oh hell no. There was nothing I wanted more than to take Shiloh home or anywhere else she wanted to go. I cursed myself for riding the bike instead of taking my car. I wasn't sure if she'd be cool with riding on a motorcycle.

I ran my hand through my hair. "I don't mind taking you home. It's just I came here on my motorcycle..."

"You have a motorcycle?" she laughed. "Why am I not surprised?"

I was confused. "What?"

"You play guitar, have tons of tattoos and you have a motorcycle. You've got the stereotypical bad boy image going on." She shook her head laughing. "I bet it drives the girls crazy."

I didn't know about this bad boy image she spoke of. I mean, yeah, it was easy to pick up girls, but she'd just made me out like playing the guitar, having tats and a motorcycle were things I used for the sole purpose of getting pussy. Maybe I read this girl all wrong. But, right then I was on the defense. It must have shown on my face because her eyes widened and she put a hand over her mouth.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean that the way it sounded!" She put a hand over her eyes. "That was so stupid. You've been nothing but nice to me and I go off and say something offensive. I swear I didn't mean to imply..."

"What? That I'm a man slut?" I probably didn't need to be so rude, but she kind of pissed me off. If she had been any other girl I wouldn't have even bothered listening to her apologize. Nor would I have cared. But, something made me want to believe that she really didn't mean the implication she made. Not to mention she looked so adorable back tracking her statement. Something was clearly wrong with me.

"Oh my god! No!" She grabbed my hand. "I promise I didn't mean that at all."

Just the touch of her hand made my cock twitch. The pleading look in her eyes for me to believe her doused any anger I had in me in an instant. Because the thing about it was, I did believe her. I tightened my grip on her hand and pulled her closer so her face was so close I could see the different shades of blue in her irises, the wrinkles in her brow and feel of her breath on my lips. In that moment, all my will power was drained from me. Any consequences I may face from my best friend were distant thoughts at best. With her pretty pink lips only a fraction of an inch from mine I could barely breathe. I had to know if they felt as soft as they looked. My fingers dove into her hair as I wrapped my hand behind her neck and pulled her that last few millimeters to close the gap between us.

The instant my mouth landed on hers I closed my eyes and let the sensation of the softest lips I had ever felt overtake me. She didn't resist. She didn't pull away. Her lips molded to mine as if they were made for me and me alone. Every nerve ending in my body sprung to life. She was warm and sweet and I needed to taste more. I tentatively brushed the tip of my tongue across her lower lip and she opened for me. I almost lost it when I felt her fingers in my hair. The taste of her mouth was so good, a mixture of honey and beer. I know that may seem off putting but, to me, it was the best thing I'd tasted in my life. I released her hand and wrapped my arm around her waist pulling her closer until she was on my lap with each of her luscious legs straddling me. Her hands were running through my hair lightly scratching my scalp. I wouldn't have been surprised if my hair stood on end like when you put your hand on one of those Van de Graaf generators in science class as a kid. It was like all my senses were heightened. Her soft lips, her fingertips, the heat of her body pressed against mine. I don't think I had ever been so hard while having sex in my life, much less just kissing a girl. Oh god! And the way her tongue curled with mine. She was like wet velvet and silk. Keeping one hand on her neck my other hand gripped her hip. She pressed into my erection and it was everything I could do not to come right then and there. No woman had ever made me feel this way, least of all with all our clothes on and from simply kissing.

A door slamming up the stairs followed by the sound of voices broke through my moments of bliss. Shiloh quickly shifted away from me. She scooted to the opposite end of the couch and nervously smoothed her hair. She didn't look at me. Instead she grabbed her beer off the table and drank it until the bottle was empty.

The guys from the band appeared with a group of girls. I wiped the stunned look off my face and put on my charming smile. Yeah, I had one of those. I had perfected it over the years.

"Hey Brian." Paul's eyes darted to Shiloh. "Oh man! Was I interrupting something?"

There was no doubt Paul had tied on more than a few drinks and probably a bit of other substances, too. I didn't like the way he was checking out Shiloh as if he was hungry and she was dessert.

I acted casual. "Nah. I was just about to take Shiloh home."

Paul sneered and winked. "Nice buddy!"

He gave her the once over again licking his lips. Just for that I could have taken his eyes out. But, as much as I had been itching for a fight, I knew the quickest way to get Shiloh out of there was to play it cool. I took her hand and pulled her from the couch.

"Come on. Let's go."

Keeping her behind me on one side I faced the rest of my body toward the guys. I kept my shoulders up and I'm pretty sure there was no mistaking the message I was sending. This girl was off limits. And, she was. As far as I was concerned, she was mine.

Paul laughed. "Chill, man. What? Did Hunter hire you to bodyguard his little sister? If you don't want the job I'd be more than happy to help."

I wanted nothing more than to flatten his face with my fist. I had to reign it in. Knocking out a famous rock star would land me in jail and I had a once a week incarceration maximum policy.

I laughed it off. "Yeah. Something like that. Thanks for the beers."

With that, I pulled Shiloh up the stairs and made for the front door. Once outside I grabbed my phone and sent a quick text to Hunter. Taking Shiloh home. Take care of Melanie.

A few seconds later he messaged back.

Np. Taking good care of her right now.

I wasn't surprised. I glanced at Shiloh and felt guilty. Her brother was probably defiling her best friend in ways she hadn't ever imagined were possible. I shrugged. Maybe Melanie was into it. She did seem to be a lot more uninhibited than Shiloh.

I only had one helmet. I put it on Shiloh's head and fastened the chin strap. All the way back to her apartment I really had to focus to concentrate on the road. Shiloh's arms around my waist while her breasts pressed against my back was more than a little distracting.

I walked her to her door (when did I become a fucking gentleman?). She handed me the helmet and smiled.

"That was fun!" she said. "Riding on a motorcycle is exhilarating!"

Her smile and enthusiasm was beyond endearing. I couldn't help but think that this girl was perfect in every way. Unfortunately, it was that very thought that shifted everything within me. She was so amazing and I wasn't going to be the one to destroy that brightness and beauty. In my world girls like her didn't exist for guys like me.

"Do you want to come in?" she asked.

In the blink of an eye several scenarios ran through my head. Not only one of which made my jeans tighter. She stood in the doorway looking like the most beautiful goddess in her tank top and shorts. My imagination had undressed her more times than I cared to admit in the past few hours. Did I want to come in? Oh, more than anything. I wanted to come inside her over and over again. I wanted to feel her wrapped around me calling out my name as I showed her pleasure beyond anything she could ever – STOP! I couldn't even entertain hooking up with her. The cool air on the ride back had helped clear my head after the most amazing kiss I'd ever experienced. So, I did what every cell in my body screamed and rebelled against.

"Shiloh...I'm sorry about earlier." No I wasn't. "I didn't mean to come on to you like that." Yes I did. "I think you're a really cool girl. And I like hanging out with you." I want you. "I just don't think that it would be a good idea for us to, ya know, let things go any further." I tried to recover, to make excuses. "I mean, Hunter is like my brother and..."

She put a finger on my lips and damned if I didn't want to suck it into my mouth. "I get it. You don't have to say anything else. It's all good."

I needed to try and salvage something. Anything.

"Can we at least be friends?" I practically punched myself in the face for sounding so stupid.

She gave me a wistful look. "Yeah. Okay. Friends." She took a step back. "Well, thank you for the ride home. Good night."

She turned and didn't look back as she closed the door.

"Good night," I whispered.

That was the first time my heart ached over a woman. For a brief moment I wanted to bang down the door and run to her and beg her to forget every thing I said and take her in my arms. And for the first time in my life I didn't want to let go.

### Chapter 6

Shiloh

My lips were still on fire even after the cool breeze blowing over me on the ride back to my apartment. Having my body pressed against Brian on the back of the motorcycle was only adding fuel to that already blazing inferno. I knew that I wanted him to stay the night with me even if it meant only one night. Kissing him had thrown all my self control out the window. It didn't matter that Brian was a womanizer and had a different lover every night. It didn't matter that I didn't do one night stands. That one kiss with him had been hotter than any other make out session I'd ever experienced. The way his hand curled around the back of my neck pulling me further into him made me think he liked it just as much as I did. At least I hoped so anyway.

He pulled up to my apartment and helped me off the bike taking the helmet off my head. He walked me to my door. I fumbled with the lock finally getting it open after a couple of tries. My hands were a little shaky. I wasn't used to being forward with guys, so I just hoped I didn't end up sounding like an idiot. I let out a quick breath and steeled myself. It was now or never. I turned to him my nerves going haywire.

"Do you want to come in?" I asked. There. I'd done it. No big deal.

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He was hesitating. That couldn't be a good sign. I immediately wished I could take back my invitation. He ran his fingers through his hair. His expression was impossible to read. Was that regret I saw in his eyes?

"Shiloh...I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to come on to you like that. I think you're a really cool girl. And I like hanging out with you. I just don't think that it would be a good idea for us to, ya know, let things go any further." He paused as if he was thinking of what to say next. "I mean, Hunter is like my brother and..."

And there it was. Hunter. Did he really believe that Hunter had any say in my personal life? Did he really think that Hunter would try to keep me from getting involved with Brian? Did Brian even want me at all? The way he kissed me sure seemed like it. But, maybe that was one sided. Or maybe he just saw a little sister type when he looked at me. Maybe he realized that kissing me was a mistake. Why should it even matter? I mean, I just met the guy a few days ago.

I raised a finger to his lips. "I get it. You don't have to say anything else. It's all good."

He shifted again. "Can we at least be friends?"

I had to force myself not to roll my eyes. Friends? Yeah sure. We can be friends while I secretly lust after you every time I see you. No problem. I really needed to just get a grip. Clearly he wasn't interested in me and I wasn't one to pine over a guy like a pathetic loser. Besides, it's like my brother said, Brian is a player. He'd probably end up hurting me anyway. Better to preemptively avoid heartache than try to deal with damage control later.

"Yeah. Okay. Friends." I backed over the threshold. "Well, thank you for the ride home. Good night."

He said goodbye and I shut the door behind me. As soon as I was inside my apartment my eyes blurred. I was so humiliated after misreading the situation so badly. I swiped the heels of my hands over my eyes. No way was I going to cry over some guy I'd only known for a few days. I grabbed a bottle of water and went to bed replaying that kiss over and over again in my head until I fell asleep.

For some reason I woke up the next morning feeling rejuvenated and empowered. The humility of Brian's rejection was a distant memory. I decided that I wasn't going to waste the day moping around. I showered and put on my favorite pink bikini wrapping a white skirt around my hips. I moved to southern California and I hadn't even gone to the beach yet. I checked my phone and saw I had a message from Melanie from the night before.

Melanie: Crashing at Hunter's. See you tomorrow.

Well, that didn't take long. Good thing Melanie wasn't one to fall for a guy because I was pretty sure Hunter wasn't looking for something serious. I texted her back hoping she was awake.

Shiloh: I'm heading to the beach. Want to come?

A few minutes later she replied.

Melanie: Definitely. Can you pick me up?

Shiloh: Be there in 15 minutes.

Melanie: Bring my red suit.

Shiloh: K

I grabbed her red suit and threw it in a bag with a couple of beach towels, some sunscreen and a couple bottles of water. Donning my sunglasses and grabbing my keys off the counter I headed out the door. I put the top down and soaked up the rays on my way to pick up Melanie. I pulled into a parking space in front of Hunter's apartment building, climbed the stairs and knocked on the door. After a few moments the door opened and my breath caught in my throat. Standing in the doorway with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist was Brian. His hair was dripping and he smelled like soap. His chest was like a beautifully sculpted, muscular mural. And, oh my god, a tiny silver ring hung from each of his nipples. At that moment, that was one of the hottest things I had ever seen. He squinted at the sunshine then a look of confusion crossed his face.

"Um, hey Shiloh. What are you doing here?"

I wasn't sure about the inner workings of a guy's brain, but I was pretty sure the way he was running his eyes up and down my body was a whole lot more than friendly. And, I was definitely certain that the temperature outside had just ratcheted up about a hundred degrees. Was it possible to get an instant sunburn? Because my skin had to be seven shades pinker with him eye fucking me like that. Keep your cool, Shiloh.

I gave him a friendly smile. "Hey. I'm just here to pick up Melanie."

"Hey Shiloh!" Melanie called from behind Brian. He stepped aside and I walked past him holding Melanie's suit out.

"Give me just a sec. I'll just go change real quick and we can go."

I nodded. "No problem."

I sat down on the couch and played with my phone as if I was reading messages. I had to keep my eyes away from Brian's half naked body.

"Hey Brian, have you seen my other shoe?" A woman's voice called out getting louder as it came down the hall.

A moment later a gorgeous redhead appeared in the living room. I wanted to crawl under the couch.

"Oh, hi," she said when she spotted me. She looked to Brian. "Sorry, I didn't realize you had company."

Brian rubbed a hand over his face then through his hair.

"Actually, that's Hunter's sister, Shiloh. She came over to pick up her friend," he explained.

"Oh my god!" she exclaimed. "It's so nice to meet you! I'm Maureen. I work with Hunter and Brian at the bar."

I knew my cheeks were red. I could feel it. "Nice to meet you, too," I replied sheepishly. What was taking Melanie so long?

I had to get out of there. I headed for the door. "Just tell Melanie I'm out in the car."

I brushed past Brian and walked outside. I took the steps down two at a time. I wanted to bang my head on the steering wheel. So much for playing it cool.

A few minutes later Melanie came out.

"What was that all about?" she asked as she slipped into the car.

"Nothing," I muttered.

She gave me the 'I'm not buying that bullshit' look. "You know you're going to have to tell me what's going on. You can't keep anything from me."

I sighed and pulled out of the parking lot.

"Brian and I kissed last night," I admitted.

"Oh my god!" she shrieked. "Was it completely earth shattering? He is ridiculously hot!"

"I guess it wasn't all that great for him. Afterward, he told me he just wanted to be friends."

"Oh no!" She put a hand on my knee. "But wait. I saw the way he was looking at you just a few minutes ago. The boy was practically salivating."

I waved her off. "It doesn't matter anyway. Obviously he has no problem going from kissing me to having sex with Maureen. I'm not exactly looking to be a notch on some guy's belt."

She laughed. "You think he slept with Maureen?"

I glanced at her. "That's sure what it looked like when she came out of his room looking for her shoe."

"Shiloh, he didn't sleep with Maureen. I did!"

My eyes widened. "What!?"

She giggled. "Not like that, silly! Hunter and I were playing video games when Brian came home. He hung out with us a for little while and then Maureen showed up. She was all upset and crying because she'd had a bad date with this guy that she really liked. After she calmed down, Brian said we could crash in his bed and he slept on the couch."

"Oh." Now I really felt stupid. It seemed I had an affinity for making a fool of myself around Brian.

"Besides, I think he likes you," she added.

"Yeah, like a little sister," I scoffed.

"Well, if that's true then he must be into incest because he was definitely undressing you with his eyes back there."

I rolled my eyes. "If he liked me then why would he say he just wants to be friends?"

We pulled up to a public parking area and walked out to the beach. Melanie waited until we were lying on our towels before she answered.

"Maybe because you're his best friend's little sister. I mean, that's got to be weird, right?"

I sighed. "Yeah, that's what he said. But, it's not like Hunter has any say in who I date. I'm twenty-one, not sixteen."

Her eyes widened. "You really like this guy!"

I didn't want to admit it but since the moment I met him I couldn't get Brian off my mind. The way he was so attentive to me at the bar. When he played the guitar there seemed to be a vulnerability there. And, the way he acted so possessive of me around Paul and his friends. It seemed like more than just being a friend. And even putting those things aside, when he kissed me I could have sworn it was just as good for him as it was for me.

"Yeah," I conceded.

"I think you should totally go for it," she said. "I mean, what's the worst thing that can happen? You have amazing sex with a smoking hot guy? Sounds like a win to me."

I laid my head back and closed my eyes. After last night's kiss I could only imagine how incredible sex with Brian would be. And I had been imagining it way more often than I should.

"Speaking of smoking hot sex god..." Melanie whispered.

I propped myself on my elbows just as his shadow reached across my legs. I gulped when my heart practically lodged itself in my throat. Brian stood at the end of my towel looking down at me. He wore a pair of army green board shorts. And nothing else. A couple of girls laying out nearby were gawking shamelessly. I couldn't blame them. I wondered for a minute if I had drool on my chin as well.

### Chapter 7

Brian

I had just stepped out of the shower when there was knock on the door. I quickly wrapped a towel around my waist and went to answer it. When I opened the door I felt like someone had knocked the wind out of my lungs. There she stood wearing a pink scrap of fabric that I supposed someone would call a bikini. And that wrap around her hips? Was that supposed to cover something? Because from my vantage point I could see every inch of her sexy legs through the sheer fabric. She had my head so twisted up that for a brief moment I actually wanted to grab my towel and wrap her in it in case someone walked by and got an eyeful of all that exposed flesh. Then I realized that I must look like a dumbass just standing in the doorway eye fucking her.

"Um, hey Shiloh. What are you doing here?" Great. I sounded like an idiot.

For one brief moment I thought she might be there to see me and my heart skipped a beat.

"Hey. I'm just here to pick up Melanie," she replied.

Her voice told me that she was completely unaffected. I guess my whole 'friends' speech last night didn't phase her. I'm pretty sure we both participated in that scorching hot kiss. It wasn't my imagination that she was into it, too was it? Then again, was I really such a dick that after I told her I just wanted to be friends that I expected that she would come chasing after me? Plenty of girls might do that, but I didn't think Shiloh was one of those girls. She had self respect. I needed to get over my ego with a quickness.

Melanie came in and I stepped aside so Shiloh could come inside. She didn't give me a second glance. She handed Melanie her bathing suit and sat down on the couch ignoring me altogether. She didn't seem pissed, just completely uninterested. I was about to go over and talk to her when Maureen came into the living room looking for her shoe. Her timing couldn't have been worse. It didn't take a psychic to see how uncomfortable Shiloh was. Nor did you have to read minds to guess what the situation had to look like from her perspective. A hot redhead walks out of my room looking for missing attire. Shiloh got up and headed for the door.

"Just tell Melanie I'm out in the car," she said as she quickly passed by me.

"Is she okay?" Maureen asked.

I sighed and closed my eyes.

Maureen put her hand on my shoulder. "You like her, don't you?"

Like her? Hell, I'd known the girl less than a week and I couldn't even look at another woman. After the pixie, which I regretted looking back on it, I hadn't touched anyone. Plenty of girls had hit on me but I didn't even notice. Hell, from the time I stepped into the party last night until I made my way out back I had four girls throwing themselves at me. Not to mention that kiss. There's no way anyone else could kiss like that. Just thinking about it guaranteed an instant hard on. Which, by the way, was extremely untimely standing in the middle of my apartment with Maureen wearing only a towel.

She noticed and raised her eyebrows. "I guess that answers my question."

Hunter came walking out rubbing his eyes and yawning. No way I was going to let him see the tent my cock was making while thinking about kissing his sister. I made a bee line for my room. I had to get it under control. I rubbed one out then put on a pair of shorts and a tee shirt. This was getting ridiculous. I needed to talk to Hunter. I couldn't keep being around Shiloh and pretend it wasn't driving me crazy.

When I returned Hunter was sitting on the counter eating a bowl of cereal.

"What's up with you?" he asked through a bite of Fruit Loops.

Maureen took that as her cue. "See ya guys. Gotta go." She gave each of us a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks for the shoulders and a place to crash last night. You guys are the best."

When the door closed behind her I hopped up onto the counter across from Hunter. I must have had a strange look on my face because Hunter put his bowl down.

"Hey, man. You okay?"

I took a deep breath. "Listen, there's something I need to talk to you about."

"Yeah, alright. What's up?"

I sighed. "I need you to hear me out on this, okay?"

"Okay, Brian you're starting worry me, man. Are you in some sort of trouble?"

Not yet. "No. It's nothing like that. You see...the thing is...I kissed Shiloh."

I braced myself for Hunter's explosion.

"You kissed my sister? When?"

"Last night at the party," I answered.

"Did she kiss you back?" he asked. Was he being serious?

"Umm...yeah."

"So what's the big deal? You look like you're waiting for me to throw punches or something. It was just a kiss. It happens."

"Well, the thing about that is...I think I like her..."

"Oh no Brian. You are not going to fuck my little sister and throw her out the door. She's not like the girls we bring home from the bar."

I raised my hands in defense. "No no! It's nothing like that. I actually wanted to ask her out. Like, on a date. Like a real date. You know...dinner or something."

Hunter started cracking up. "You want to take Shiloh out on a date? Are you high? You've never been on a date your entire life!"

I bowed my head. "I know."

Hunter's laughter started to fade. "You're really serious?"

I looked him in the eyes. He had to know I wasn't fucking around. "Yeah. I am."

He shook his head. "So what? Is this you asking my permission or something?"

"Sort of, I guess. I mean, you're like a brother to me."

"But, you'd ask her out even if I said no, right?"

I shrugged. "Probably."

He started laughing again and I felt like I was in some kind of alternate universe. I couldn't tell if he was just gearing up to knock the shit out of me or if he was really amused.

He put his hand up. "I'm sorry man. But, this is all too much. In the six years we've been friends I have never once seen you want to take a girl anywhere but the bedroom. Now you want to go on a date, with my sister no less. And you're asking for my blessing. This is priceless. I wish I had it on video."

Now I wanted to punch him. He was going to make me wallow in humility. But, if that's what it took I would suffer it out. So, I waited. What was a little kick to my pride if it meant going out with Shiloh? If she agreed to, anyway.

After a few minutes Hunter pulled himself together. He jumped down off the counter and I did the same. He stepped right up to me and pointed his finger into my chest.

"Alright Brian. But under two conditions."

"Okay."

His eyes darkened. "No drugs."

"Deal."

"The second condition is very important, so listen closely."

I nodded.

"Don't hurt her."

I had no intention of hurting her. In fact, I was starting to think she was already killing me. But, if that was his condition, then I'd do my best to abide by it.

"Okay," I said.

"I mean it, Brian. You break her heart and I'll break your neck. You got it?"

"Yeah. I got it."

I was certain that Hunter couldn't beat me in a fight, but I didn't think it would be appropriate to point that out at that moment.

Hunter relaxed and took a step back. He gave me a smile and shook his head. "I never thought I'd see the day. That must have been one hell of a kiss."

"You have no idea," I muttered.

I grabbed the keys to my bike and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" Hunter called after me.

"To ask your sister out."

"Right now?"

I opened the door and turned back to him. "Oh yeah."

I finally located her car after the second lot. I pulled into a spot and yanked my shirt off tossing it onto my seat. Okay, so maybe my ego wasn't totally annihilated. I needed to use any weapon in my arsenal to persuade her to give me a chance. I walked along the beach ignoring the glances and stares I was getting from girls I passed. Then I spotted her. Fuck! That damn bathing suit! I adjusted my dick willing it to behave. Not an easy task with all that smooth skin on display. And, it didn't escape my notice that there were plenty of other eyes enjoying the view. Even though I couldn't blame them that didn't mean I didn't want to gouge their eyes out nonetheless.

Melanie spotted me first. She clearly liked what she saw. Her expression was so transparent. I stopped a few inches from the end of Shiloh's beach towel. My mouth went dry with the view in front of me. She leaned up on her elbows.

"Hey," I managed.

"Hey," she replied.

"Listen, can we talk?" I asked her.

She sat up more and crossed her legs. It was definitely one of those moments where I wanted to bite my fist. She patted the towel and I sat beside her. I could smell her floral scent mixed with coconut lotion.

"What's up?" she asked casually.

I scratched my head. In a matter of seconds I had been reduced to a bumbling thirteen year old trying to get up the nerve to ask a girl to the eighth grade dance. Not that I knew what that was like, but I imagined it was pretty much the way I felt at the moment. I had never been nervous around girls. Hell, I'd never had to try to get a girl. They were always willing to go home with me or take me back to their place. But, I didn't just want to take this girl back to my bed. Well, I did, but this was different. I wanted to hang out with her and get to know her. Crazy, I know. It wasn't just that she was beautiful – she was beyond beautiful – but something about her just drew me in. She had this sort of aura about her that made me feel good when I was around her.

"Well, I kind of wanted to talk to you in private."

"You might as well just spill it now," Melanie said. "She's going to tell me later anyway. You'll save her the time and energy of having to repeat a conversation."

Shiloh laughed and I had to mentally reprimand my cock yet again.

"Alright, for the sake of your time and energy...I was just wondering if I could take you out sometime."

She smirked. "You mean like a friendly cup of coffee or something?"

Oh man. She wasn't going to let me off the hook easy. If she wanted to play that way, then I wasn't going to make it too easy on her either. I flashed my signature smile, the one that had women agreeing to go to bed with me in five seconds flat. The one with the dimple.

"No. Not a friendly cup of coffee." I leaned a little closer to her. "I want to take you to dinner and maybe spend a few hours walking on the beach talking. Then I want to kiss you again – for a long time."

She let out a breath. "I see."

Melanie jumped up. "I need to go cool off in the water."

I didn't put any distance between us. I lifted my hand and touched her cheek lightly.

"I'm sorry about last night," I whispered. "I was a little freaked out. And, I don't want to be just friends."

We were close enough that I could feel her breath feathering across my lips. I can't even describe how much will power it was taking for me to keep from moving forward and pressing my lips to hers.

"But what about my brother?" she asked.

I smiled. "I talked to him. He threatened to kill me if I hurt you, but otherwise he's okay."

She laughed and I almost winced. The girl's laugh had some kind of direct line to my cock. Like it was under her control.

"So? Can I take you out?" I needed an answer in a bad way. The suspense was killing me.

"Hmmm...do we have to wait on that kiss?"

"Oh hell no."

I closed the gap and the fireworks began all over again. So much for calming my libido. My hand cupped her jaw as she slid her tongue in my mouth. After a few minutes of mouth to mouth intercourse I had to pull away. I was sporting a raging hard on and I feared I wouldn't be able to keep from ripping off that pathetic excuse for a bikini bottom and dive inside her.

I looked into her crystal eyes. "So is that a yes?"

She giggled only making matters worse. "Yes, Brian. I will go out on a date with you."

I looked down at her 'bathing suit' (yet another mistake). "Isn't that suit a little small?"

She leaned back and looked down. "You don't like it? I think it's cute."

"Cute," I repeated. I shook my head. "I'm not sure that's how I would describe it. And, I definitely like it. But, I'm trying to be good here and that's very difficult when every other guy on the beach is appreciating how 'cute' it is."

Her eyes sparkled with amusement. "How else am I supposed to get maximum benefit of the California sun without being naked? I've been holed up in chilly Massachusetts for the past three years, so I have a lot of catching up to do on my tan."

"Tanning bed," I countered.

"That's not a real tan! Don't you know anything?"

"I know that suit should be outlawed in public," I replied.

"Look around, Brian." She waved her arm toward the beach. "There are plenty of women wearing bikinis far more revealing."

"Maybe so, but I'm only concerned about the one in front of me."

And there was that pretty blush I adored.

I gave her a quick kiss and stood up.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"I have to get to work. I have an appointment. After that I'm working at the bar. You guys should come and hang out."

"We'll be there," Melanie announced as she plopped back down on her towel.

I smiled at Shiloh. "Look forward to seeing you later."

The next few hours until I saw Shiloh again were going to crawl by at a snail's pace.

### Chapter 8

Shiloh

It was Friday night and the bar was packed. Melanie and I squeezed through the crowd until we stood at the end of the bar. I tried to hide my disappointment when I noticed that Hunter and Maureen were bartending. No Brian. He did say he was working tonight right? Maureen spotted us and came over.

"Hey. Sorry about the misunderstanding earlier," she said.

"Actually, I'm the one who should apologize," I responded. "I was really rude."

She waved it off. "No big deal. What can I get you to drink?"

I ordered the Belgian beer. It had become my new favorite. We stood at the bar for half an hour and there was still no sign of Brian. I wanted to ask Hunter about it but there was no way I was going to let myself appear desperate. Besides the band was playing and I really liked what I was hearing. I made my way closer to the stage and off to the side to watch them. Melanie headed for the dance floor.

The tempo of the music shifted to something a little melancholy that was easy for me to absorb given my deflated mood. My fingers strummed the outside of my glass as I closed my eyes to fully appreciate the music.

"You are so beautiful," a low, sexy voice breathed in my ear as strong arms wrapped around my waist from behind me.

My legs turned to jelly and my heart skipped. I couldn't stop a smile from forming on my lips. Brian kissed my neck letting his lips linger a few moments, his warm breath sending shivers all over my skin. Somehow I managed to compose myself enough to turn and face him.

"You're late for work," I said.

"Sorry about that. My appointment took longer than expected." He smiled. "Besides it looks like you could use another beer, so technically I am working."

I raised an eyebrow. "Fraternizing with the customers?"

"Just one." He leaned down and kissed me.

Brian took my hand and led me back to the bar.

"Finally!" Maureen said when she saw us. She pulled the apron from her waist and set it behind the bar.

Brian approached two guys sitting at the end of the bar and tapped one of them on the shoulder. "You guys mind giving up your seats for the ladies?"

The guy scoffed and started to turn back around. Maureen shoved the guy off his stool.

"Don't be an ass, Ben! I've been on my feet all day. Now, you guys give up those seats so I can have a couple of drinks with my friend here."

Ben gave her a sheepish look then gave his friend a nod before they relinquished the seats. Maureen motioned for me to take one.

"Um, thanks guys," I muttered.

Brian gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before going behind the bar. As promised he brought me a fresh beer and set a drink in front of Maureen before tending to the numerous other customers. Every so often he would glance over at me and wink while giving me that sexy half smile.

Maureen noticed. "Wow. Somebody pinch me because I think I must be dreaming."

I gave her a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

Her eyes kept darting back and forth between Brian and me. "I just never thought I'd see the day that Brian Curtis would be tamed."

"That bad, huh?" I asked.

She put her hand on my forearm. "Oh, don't get me wrong! Brian is a sweetheart. It's just in the time I've known him and Hunter I've never seen either of them with the same girl twice."

"Look." She pointed in the direction of Hunter. He was leaned against the bar flirting with a gorgeous brunette. The woman was running her finger over the top of his hand suggestively.

"Now look at Brian." He was serving a drink to a sexy blond. The woman leaned toward him pushing her ample chest forward so he could get a clear view of her very revealing cleavage. She put one of her manicured hands on his forearm as she spoke to him. There was blatant sexual invitation in the expression she wore. Brian lifted her hand off his arm and set it on the bar. His posture wasn't friendly in any way. He quickly stepped away from her to help another customer.

Maureen laughed. "Yep. That boy's got it bad."

I wrinkled my nose. "You think?"

"Honey, I don't think, I know." She finished her drink then yelled across the bar. "Hey bartender! Stop breaking hearts and get us another round!"

He poured a long pour of liquor and topped it off with a splash of soda for Maureen and filled a pint glass of beer for me. He set the drinks in front of us and took our empty glasses. He returned a minute later with a bottle of water and put in front of me. I raised my eyebrow in curiosity.

"It'll help keep you from feeling hung over tomorrow," he explained.

"Well, then thanks," I replied.

Maureen reached over and squeezed Brian's cheek. "Awww...that is so sweet!"

Brian's cheeks flushed and I laughed.

The rest of the night went by quickly as Melanie, Maureen and I sat at the bar talking. Maureen turned out to be really fun to hang out with. She picked on Hunter and Brian incessantly which had Melanie and I cracking up on numerous occasions. Before I knew it the bar was closing and I had more than just a buzz. I wobbled a little as I slipped off the bar stool and Brian put an arm around my waist to support me. Hunter had his arm around the brunette from earlier.

"I'll take Shiloh and Melanie home," Brian offered.

Hunter nodded, looked over to the brunette and gave Brian a wink. "Thanks man. Make sure you get my sister home safely."

"Will do," Brian promised.

When we got back to my apartment Melanie gave us a slurred "Night," as she went to her room.

Brian helped me to my room. My eyes were heavy and my brain felt thick and sluggish. I grabbed a tee shirt and sweat shorts and went into the bathroom to change. When I came out Brian was still standing in the same spot as before.

"I should probably go," he said. "I just wanted to make sure you got home okay."

The moment felt awkward probably because we were standing in my bedroom and the sexual tension between us was palpable. I stepped toward him until we were only inches apart and put my arms around his waist. He pulled me into him and kissed the top of my head. Being in his arms was such an amazing feeling. I tilted my head up trying to focus on the flecks of gold in his emerald eyes. His lips were so close to mine I could feel their warmth. I wanted to feel them pressed against mine. As if he read my mind he leaned down and gently kissed me. My whole body lit up and I arched closer into him. I could feel how turned on he was and it drove me crazy. After a few minutes he slowly pulled away and I opened my eyes. The look of hunger I witnessed in his eyes only made me want him more. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed loudly.

"I really, really should go before I do something stupid," he said regretfully.

What? Wait a minute. Did he think making out with me was a stupid idea? My poker face must not have been in place because he quickly started explaining himself.

"Shiloh, don't get me wrong. You have no idea how badly I want to take you over to that bed and pleasure every inch of your body. But you're buzzed and I won't take advantage of you."

Every cell in my body screamed for him to take advantage of me.

"Besides," he continued. "We haven't even been out on a date yet."

I laughed.

"What are you doing Sunday?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Nothing. Why?"

"Can I take you out on Sunday? I have to work at the shop and the bar tomorrow, but I'm off Sunday."

I nodded. "Yeah. That would be good."

He took my phone from the night stand where I had set it and started typing into it. A minute later his phone made a dinging sound in his pocket.

"I programmed my number into your contacts," he said. "I'll call you tomorrow – or rather later today – okay?"

"Okay." My conversational skills were getting worse by the minute.

He led me over to my bed and pulled back the covers. "You should get some sleep."

I crawled into bed and he draped the covers over me before sitting next to me on the edge of the bed. He brushed my hair away from my face and his fingers rubbed lightly against my cheek. I couldn't read the expression on his face. It was so gentle and attentive. Then he smiled and leaned down to kiss me before standing up.

"Sleep well, Shiloh. I'll lock the door on my way out." He winked then turned off the light and left.

I was fast asleep with a smile on my face within a minute.

### Chapter 9

Brian

I was used to getting turned on by women in sexy clothes that revealed as much of their assets as possible. I mean, what guy wouldn't get a hard on over breasts that were barely covered and little skirts that gave an ample view of the goods beneath when a girl bent over? But, when Shiloh came out of the bathroom wearing an oversized tee shirt and a pair of mid-thigh length old sweat shorts smelling like minty toothpaste my dick instantly stood at attention. How could any woman be that adorable and sexy at the same time? It was insanely unfair. In any other situation, with any other woman I would have grabbed her up an thrown her on the bed. Our clothes would have hit the floor in seconds and I would've been deep inside her moments later. And, I wouldn't have gotten the slightest protest – until I bailed when I was done.

But, this was different. She was different. Not that I didn't want to take her clothes off and have my way with her. Oh god! How I wanted her! But, I knew she had had a lot to drink and the thought of taking advantage of her twisted my gut. When we kissed and she pressed her body into mine it felt so good I could've come right then. With monumental effort I pulled away and tucked her into her bed.

Lying on her pillow she looked so pretty and sweet. I rubbed my fingers across her cheek and loved the feel of her soft skin. She had washed off what little makeup she had on earlier and in my eyes she was even more beautiful in that natural state. Her face was flawless. Her bright blue eyes were framed with thick lashes. Her cheeks had a slight rosy glow. Once again I couldn't conjure an image in my mind of any woman as gorgeous as she was. Staring down at her sweet smile something in my chest tightened. I had never felt anything like it before. I was simultaneously thrilled and terrified. I knew with every part of me that I couldn't hurt this girl. And, not because I was worried about her brother. Seeing that little smile turn into a frown because of me would inevitably crush me. I had no idea what I was doing and I hoped I didn't fuck this up.

I drove home and, like the past several nights, I used my hand to release the tension that invariably built up whenever I spent any time with Shiloh. I hadn't jerked off this many times in a week since my first boner when I was a kid. I fell asleep with the image of her smiling sleepily up at me. She was the sweetest dream I'd ever had.

### *****

After an hour and a half at the gym I headed to the shop. Saturdays were usually pretty busy with appointments and walk ins. Matt and I had gone through several of my designs and he'd chosen one with a musical inspiration. I was in the middle of drawing the outline across his shoulders when Greg, another tattoo artist who worked at the shop, gave a low whistle.

"Now that's a fine piece of ass," he said as he stared toward the front of the shop.

Greg was my age and, much like myself, had no trouble attracting women who were eager to jump in the sack. He had long brown hair, several face piercings, gauges in his ears, and his entire body was practically covered in ink. His favorite scores were the girly girls who came in to the shop wanting some cute little fairy or flower tattoo as a reminder of their spring break trip. No doubt that was just the type of girl who must've walked in at that moment. I shook my head and laughed but didn't look up from my work. Greg got up and walked toward the front of the shop.

"What can I do for you, beautiful?" he asked suggestively.

"I just came in to get something added to the tattoo on my foot," she replied.

I stopped and turned off the gun when I heard her voice. My heart skipped.

"Why'd you stop, man?" Matt asked.

I set the gun down and stood. "Give me just a sec."

I walked to the front of the store and Greg was leaned against the counter running his eyes all over Shiloh's body. My hands fisted at my sides.

Shiloh spotted me and her smile lit up the room. "Hey!" she said as she stepped past Greg.

"Brian I got this," Greg said. "You can finish up with Matt."

I practically glared at him. "I don't think so, Greg. Nobody touches her but me."

When Shiloh reached me I put a possessive arm behind her neck burying my fingers in her silky hair. I kissed her and her lips were to me what water must be like to a man in the desert. I hadn't realized how much I needed her lips until the moment I saw her. I could've kissed her for hours.

Matt cleared his throat loudly and I couldn't help laughing. I pulled back regretfully and caught the look of surprise and amusement on Greg's face. I flipped him off and he started laughing while shaking his head. I was never going to live this down.

I looked back at Shiloh. "What are you doing here?"

She smiled. "You said you would add some water to my dolphin. Is it a bad time? I can come back another day."

There was no way I was letting her leave. "I'm in the middle of an outline on Matt but if you can wait a little while I can work on yours as soon as I'm finished with this."

"Can I watch?" she asked.

I gave Matt a questioning look and he nodded.

Pulling a chair next to me I motioned for her to sit down. Just having her in the same room was making my heart race. And, damn, she smelled so good. I donned a fresh pair of gloves and forced myself to focus. I picked up the gun and started to work. After a few minutes I was back in the zone. It took another half hour for me to finish the outline. I wiped away the excess ink.

"Take a look in the mirror and tell me what you think so far," I said to Matt.

He stood and looked it over. "I think it's great."

"Cool. We'll do the fill on the next session. Why don't you come back on Tuesday," I suggested.

I covered the tattoo and Matt put his shirt on. "See you Tuesday. Good to see you again Shiloh."

"You, too," she said and waved as he left the shop.

"Let me just clean up and we can get started," I told her.

After I got everything cleaned I pulled a sketch pad from my bag and opened it to a new page.

"Let me take a look at your foot," I said to her.

She sat on the padded table across from me, took off her sandal and extended her foot to me. I took it in my hands. Even her fucking foot was perfect! How could this girl be real? I took a look at the dolphin, then set her foot between my legs on the seat of my chair. Yeah. That close. Shoving away the thought of her toes massaging my crotch, I picked up the sketch pad and began drawing. She watched as I drew an exact copy of the dolphin on her foot then added water around it. The dolphin was in a typical arch as if it had just leapt out of the water and was curving as it started to dive back down. I drew water droplets spraying away from it's tail and a break in the water's surface where it just jumped out. The after effect gave it motion.

"Wow," she remarked. "How do you just come up with something like that and draw it that fast?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I pretty much had the image in my mind when you first showed me the dolphin. You see, the way it is now it's just a static image. But when you add the water and spray it has motion so the dolphin looks like it's jumping out of the water."

"How did you learn how to draw like that?" she asked. "It's amazing."

I laughed feeling embarrassed. "I don't know. I guess I've just always had a knack for it. I've been drawing since I was able to hold a pencil."

She crossed her arms over her chest and looked at me skeptically. "You've never taken art classes?"

I shook my head slightly. "No."

"Can I see more of your drawings?"

I handed her the sketch pad. "You can look at those while I work on your foot."

I cleaned the top of her foot, prepped the skin and inks.

"Are you ready?" I asked as I put on my gloves.

She nodded. I turned on the gun and started to draw. She didn't even flinch. She just sat there looking through my drawings as if I was using a pen. Even when I went over the bony part she didn't twitch. As simple as the design was I was pretty sure it was the most sensual tat I'd ever done. I was putting my brand on her. Not in some primitive, ritualistic that is my property kind of way. More like adding brush strokes to an already exquisite painting. When I finished I looked up at her and she was staring at a drawing with her mouth open.

I gave her a puzzled look. "What?"

She turned the page so I could see what she was looking at. It was a sketch of her lying on her beach towel. Shit! I had forgotten about that. I had drawn it after I asked her for a date when I got to the shop. Fucking wonderful. Now she was going to think I was some perverted stalker. I looked away and busied myself with putting away my things. I could feel her eyes on me.

"When did you draw this one?" she asked.

"The other day after I left the beach," I replied.

"It's beautiful," she said.

"I think so. It doesn't hurt that the subject is so easy on the eyes." I looked up at her and gave her my half smile.

She gave a nervous laugh.

The image of her lying on the beach was making my jeans feel a little snug so I changed the subject. "Take a look at your foot."

She examined the tattoo and a bright smile lit up her face. "It's perfect!"

I placed some ointment and a bandage over the area then gave her instructions on how to care for it.

"So what do I owe you?" she asked as she reached for her bag.

"Nothing. This one is on me."

Mark, the shop owner came in and I glanced at the clock. My shift was over and I had a few hours before I had to be at the bar.

I turned to Shiloh. "You want to get something to eat?"

"Yeah. But it's my treat since you refuse to let me pay for the tattoo."

I didn't respond. I'd let her think she was buying my food but there was no way that was going to happen. Mark gave me a curious look when we passed by and Greg called out "See you later lover boy," as we were walking toward the door. I gave him the finger over my shoulder as he laughed.

When we got outside Shiloh turned to me. "Do you think you could give me ride?"

"What? You don't have a ride?" I was confused. "How did you get here?"

"Melanie needed to borrow my car so I had her drop me off. I can call Hunter if it's an inconvenience."

Beautiful, silly girl. I'd drive across the country in a heartbeat if she asked me to. I held out my arm so she could walk on the heel of her foot steadily.

"You'll do no such thing," I chided her.

I led her to my car and she gasped when she saw it.

"This is your car?"

I laughed. "Yeah. She's my baby. Nineteen sixty seven Shelby GT five hundred. What do you think?"

She ran her fingers over the shiny black paint. "It's really beautiful."

"She wasn't always so nice. I traded a lot of ink for her restoration."

I opened the door and helped her into the passenger seat. Since when did I become a gentleman? I shook my head as I walked around the car to the driver's side.

"Do you like Mexican food?" I asked her as I cranked the engine.

"Love it," she replied.

"There's this excellent little Mexican place a few miles from here."

"This is it?" she asked incredulously when we pulled up into a worn out parking lot in front of a shanty of a building.

There were some old metal tables and chairs and a couple of weathered picnic tables out front. The building was small and had seen better days. The paint on the exterior was chipped and peeling and there no was telling what color it had been originally A bright yellow sign with faded blue letters read: comida Mexicana. It didn't get much simpler than that. The place looked like a dive but the food was outstanding.

I smiled. "Yep. Best Mexican food north of the border. I know it's not much to look at but wait until you taste the food."

She gave me a look of uncertainty but followed me inside. We ordered and took our food outside to one of the picnic tables. Shiloh sat across from me and unwrapped one of her tacos then took a bite. I watched her intently, not just because I wanted to see her reaction but something about watching her eat was fascinating.

"Oh my god! This is so good!" she said through a mouthful of pork, lettuce and sauce.

"I told you," I countered before taking a bite of my own taco.

We sat for over an hour talking about Shiloh's plans for school and what she wanted to do after she graduated. She told me she wanted to continue on and get her Masters so she could become a private therapist. I talked to her about mine and Hunter's plan to open a tattoo shop. She talked about what it was like living back east. When I asked about her mom she got really quiet. She wiped her hands with her napkin while she seemed to be thinking of how to answer.

"She died," she said simply.

"I'm sorry," I replied. Shit! Shit! Shit!

"No no, it's okay. You didn't know. Hunter doesn't even know," she said.

"When did it happen?"

"Just over a year ago. She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer but by the time they caught it, it had spread to other parts of her body." She sighed wistfully. "She got sick so quickly. It's still sometimes hard to believe that one day she seemed okay then the next she was wasting away. She died six months after she was diagnosed."

I took her hand. "Shiloh, I really am sorry."

"Thanks." She quickly changed the subject. "So what about you? Do you have any family?"

"I've got Hunter."

"What about your parents?"

This wasn't going to be a much more positive topic of conversation.

"My dad bailed when I was a baby, so I never knew him. And my mom...let's just say she wasn't much of a mothering type."

"Do you ever see her?" she asked.

"Nah. She doesn't stay in one place for long." In other words, she's at a different loser's place every other night. "She's got some drug problems." That was putting it mildly. I didn't think my mother had seen a sober day since my dad left her with no job, no money and a an infant to take care of.

"Isn't there any way you could get her some help?"

I knew she was trying to be nice but I could still feel the anger starting to boil in my gut and I didn't want to take it out on Shiloh.

"I'd rather not talk about this, okay."

She nodded. "Okay."

Now the air between us felt awkward. I stood and took our trash to the old metal drum to throw it away.

"I should probably take you home," I said as I walked back to the table.

I helped her back to the car and neither of us said anything until I pulled in front of her apartment.

"I'm sorry if I was being nosy," she said softly. "You barely know me and I shouldn't have pried into your personal business."

"Don't apologize. You didn't do anything wrong," I reassured her. "It's just not something I'm comfortable talking about. That's all."

"I understand." She smiled. "Well, thank you for the tattoo and the food. Although I still think you're a stubborn ass for not letting me pay." She slapped my arm playfully.

I laughed. "And I thought that women liked it when a guy pays for her meal."

"We do, but it was the least I could do to pay you back for the tattoo."

"You don't owe me anything, Shiloh. I offered to do it, remember?"

"I know, but you keep doing nice things for me and I haven't done anything in return," she said.

"You see, that's where you're wrong," I argued.

One of her brows went up. "Oh?"

"Unless you've changed your mind you've agreed to go on a date with me tomorrow," I pointed out. "Speaking of which I'll pick you up around eleven tomorrow morning. And, bring a swim suit."

She opened her mouth to say something and I put a finger over her lips.

"Huh uh. I'm not telling you anything else," I said grinning.

I quickly leaned over and kissed her before she could protest. If I didn't have to work in an hour I would've stayed locked with her lips for the rest of the night. Pulling away from her was like trying to pry metal from an electromagnet. My gaze held hers as I tried to gain my composure.

"I have to get to work," I said regretfully.

I got out and went around to open her door. I walked her to her door and gave her one more kiss. Self torture, but worth it to feel those soft lips again. She went inside and I had to adjust myself, yet again, as I walked back to the car. I don't know how she did it, but every time I was around her I invariably got a hard on at least once. She was making me crazy and I loved it.

### Chapter 10

Shiloh

At five minutes until eleven there was a knock on the door. Hmmm...he was punctual, no less. I had decided to wear my pale blue bikini under my black tank dress. I had a small bag with a change of clothes. My hair was pulled up in a high ponytail. I slipped on a pair of black flip flops on my way to the door. I opened the door and there he stood with an arm above his head leaning casually on the door frame. When he saw me that gorgeous smile spread across his face.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked.

"Yeah. And where is it we're going exactly?"

He gave me a sly look. "You'll see."

We drove along the coast for close to an hour away from most civilization. He took an exit and after a few minutes we arrived at a deserted stretch of beach. There were no houses or hotels and the landscape was a little rustic. He pulled a bag out of the trunk then took my hand and led me along a narrow sand path down a hill. All around us the view of the beach was impeded by tall brush. Beyond the brush only the ocean was visible. It took several minutes for us to reach the clearing that spread out to pale sand. The waves lapped at the shoreline and there wasn't another person in sight. We walked along the sand until we reached a rocky overhang. Brian set his bag down and kneeled down to open it. He pulled out a blanket and spread it out under the overhang. He sat on one side of the blanket and patted the blanket for me to do the same. I set my bag on the corner of the blanket.

Brian fumbled through the bag again and pulled out a small cooler. He opened it and pulled out a beer removing the lid before handing it to me. After retrieving his own beer he set out an array of sliced meats and cheeses as well as crackers.

"I hope you like picnics," he said.

I smiled. He could have taken me out to some restaurant like any typical date. Instead, he put together a picnic on a secluded beach. I had to admit he was steadily reaching swoon worthy status.

"I love it. This is so great."

He smiled causing my heart rate to speed up. We sat and picked at the food. It was different spending time alone with him on an official date. It was hard for me to come up with something to talk about. I was aware of him sitting near me. And then he did something that made my insides clench. He pulled the hem of his shirt up and over his head. I had to force myself not to hyperventilate. His abs and chest were seriously cut. Even the slightest of movements caused his muscles to flex. I had to come up with something to say before I risked being caught practically drooling over his body.

"So, which one did you get done first?" I asked pointing at his tattoos.

He leaned forward and arched his shoulder around pointing to a kanji symbol. "This one."

"What does it mean?"

His expression became serious. "Survive."

I had a feeling there was some important meaning for him but after the conversation the day before I didn't want to pry or make him uncomfortable.

"How old were you?" It seemed like a pretty harmless question.

"Fourteen," he replied. "I had a friend who could draw and I let him experiment on me.

A dragon was wrapped around the symbol its tail curving through the bold black script.

"I had the dragon added later to cover up some of the imperfections," he explained. "How is your foot feeling?"

I shrugged. "It's a little tender but not too bad."

He laughed. "You know, you're kind of a badass. The foot is one of the more painful places to get a tattoo, yet you didn't even flinch."

"I was distracted looking at all your drawings. You're really good, you know."

He leaned back on the blanket using his balled up tee shirt as a pillow and closing his eyes. Feeling the warmth of the sun on my back I finally got over being self conscious and took off my dress. I laid back on the blanket and soaked up the rays. The awkwardness I'd felt before just dissolved as we lay next to each other quietly. A few minutes later I felt Brian's fingers intertwine with mine. My heart skipped.

### *****

After a leisurely day laying on the beach we arrived back at my apartment in the early evening. We stood at my front door and I was a little disappointed that our time together was coming to an end.

"I had a really nice day," I said as I opened the door. "Thank you for the picnic."

"I'm glad you liked it." He seemed to hesitate like he wanted say something more. He ran a hand through his hair. "Listen...would you maybe want to come over and watch a movie or something? We could grab some take out or something."

My insides were doing the happy dance. "Yeah. Okay. I just need to take a shower first." Then I stopped. "What about Hunter? Do you think he'd have a problem with it?"

"Nah. He texted me earlier and told me not to wait up for him," he replied.

"He is such a slut!" I teased.

But something dark flashed in Brian's eyes. It was brief but I caught it. I stepped into the apartment.

"I'll just be a few minutes," I said. "Help yourself to something to drink if you want."

Brian took a seat on the couch. I hurried back to my room and looked through my closet. I decided that I wasn't going to go out of my way to try to impress him. I pulled some comfortable pants and a tee shirt out and went into the bathroom. After my shower I braided my hair and put on a pair of flip flops.

Brian stood when I went into the living room. His eyes gave me a once over and for a brief moment I regretted not wearing something a little more attractive. Oh well. If he didn't like me for me then I didn't need to waste my time on him anyway.

"You ready to go?" he asked.

"Let me just leave a note for Melanie."

I jotted a note and set it on the table. When I turned around Brian was standing inches from me. He put one hand on my cheek and leaned in to my neck taking a deep breath.

"You smell so incredible," he whispered.

Chills covered my body.

He pulled back quickly and grabbed my hand. "We should get going."

I smiled and followed him out to the car. He held my hand as he drove to his apartment. My body was still thrumming with desire. When we got into the apartment he threw his keys on the table and emptied the bag from our day at the beach. Hmm...that was odd/ Brian didn't strike me as the kind of guy who would be so neat. I sat on the couch to wait for him.

"Why don't you pick out something to watch while I get cleaned up?" he said. "The DVD's are in the cabinet below the TV."

I looked through the selection of movies and chose The Lord of the Rings. Brian came out of the bathroom wearing nothing but sweat pants. His hair was still damp and he looked so sexy I had to bite my tongue to keep a straight face. He sat down next to me his clean scent making my mouth water. We ordered Chinese and started the movie. After we finished eating Brian cleared away our containers. When he came back to the couch he motioned for me to sit closer to him. I scooted over and he put his arm over my shoulder. The only place I could rest my head was against his chest. Not that I was complaining. We lay together watching the movie alternating quoting lines. It felt so natural like we had been doing that for the longest time. It was hard to believe we'd known each other less than two weeks. I found myself hoping he felt the same way. I snuggled in a little closer and after a few minutes I fell asleep.

### Chapter 11

Brian

She felt so good wrapped in my arms. I had never just lay on the couch and watched a movie with any woman. Hell, I'd never held a woman just to hold her. When the credits were finished rolling and the DVD went back to the main menu I couldn't bring myself to get up and turn it off. The menu music repeated itself over and over as I just stared down at Shiloh sleeping. She looked so peaceful. I committed her face to memory just as it was so I could draw it later. I stroked her hair lightly until I fell asleep.

I woke up and the room was dark except for the flashing of the TV screen. Looking at the clock I saw that it was after two in the morning. Shiloh still slept. At some point she had curled herself around me and I was sporting a major hard on. I realized that probably wasn't the best way for Hunter to find us whenever he did finally get home. I reached over and grabbed the remote turning the TV off. As gently as I could I sat up and pulled Shiloh into my arms. I carried her back to my room lying her on the bed. She shifted and let out a little sound but didn't wake up. I locked my door and crawled into bed beside her. I pulled her close so that her back was against my chest. I was pretty sure I could fall asleep with her like this every night and be perfectly content. And that scared the shit out of me. I didn't do relationships. I'd never had a girlfriend in my life. What if I fell for her and she realized she could do so much better? Was I falling for her? Did I even know what that meant? I sure didn't know how it felt. What if she didn't feel the same about me?

I tried to push the thoughts out of my head. Shit! I barely knew this girl and already my head was all twisted and confused. The only thing I knew was that being around her made me feel good. And, I had never been so insanely attracted to anyone before. She walked in a room and my blood heated. But, it was more than that. She had this natural, understated self assurance. When she walked out of her room earlier wearing those yoga pants and tight little shirt my throat went dry. How did she manage to make lounge around the house clothes look as sexy as lingerie? Oh, I did not need to even think about lingerie! After seeing her in a bikini twice now, I had no trouble imagining her in a lacy get up. I had to pull my hips away from her.

### *****

Shiloh and I spent most of our free time together. She and Melanie spent a lot of time at the bar on the nights Hunter and I worked. Sometimes she would come into the shop and we would talk while I worked. I thought over time I would get tired of hanging out with the same woman all the time, but when I was away from her I was thinking about her. She talked about how close she and Hunter had gotten growing up and how hard it was when their parents divorced. She never broached the subject of my mom after the one conversation. The more time I spent with her the more I wanted to open up to her. But there was always this fear that if she learned about my past she would turn away from me. I should've known better after the subject of my promiscuity came up one night about a month after we had been dating.

"Is it true you and Hunter sleep with a different girl every night?" she asked bluntly.

I nearly choked on my beer. I looked up at her as I wiped my mouth. How the hell was I supposed to answer that?

Her face was open and nonjudgmental. "It's okay if you do. I was just curious if the rumors were true. I've always known Hunter was a player."

She said it so matter of fact that I couldn't help but believe her. So I told her the truth.

"Well, part of that is true and part isn't." I needed her to know that since she and I had been dating I hadn't been with anyone else, nor did I want to be. "Before I met you I did fool around...a lot...A LOT. And, Hunter still fools around. But I need you to believe that since our first date I haven't even wanted to touch another girl. I swear it."

She smiled and kissed me. "I believe you," she whispered.

I really hoped so because going without sex for a month after getting it almost every night was close to torture. Not enough to tempt me to seek out someone else. But, let's just say, I had never had such an intimate relationship with my hand before this.

Shiloh and Melanie easily infused themselves into mine and Hunter's group of friends. Melanie was outgoing and loved to party so she was quickly accepted. Shiloh was quieter but had this open easy way about her that seemed to draw people in. Especially me. Even Hunter had stopped with the overprotective big brother act. He seemed to accept that I wasn't going to fuck things up. I hoped he was right.

I noticed at times when we would go out guys would eye her or come up and talk to her when I wasn't around. The first few times nearly got Hunter and I into brawls. Shiloh seemed to be the only one who could talk me down. I frequented the gym more often like some kind of caveman needing to stay in top shape to defend his woman. After about the third week into our relationship –yes, I called it a relationship – Greg finally stopped making jokes about my lack of a sex life. It could have had something to do with the fact that I cold cocked him in the jaw one day after a particularly heavy make out with Shiloh that left my balls aching to the point I could barely walk.

Most of the regular girls at the bar had gotten the hint and stopped hitting on me. I was pretty relieved because I constantly worried what Shiloh would think. The only one who didn't seem to get it was the pixie girl. She showed up at the bar more often and stepped up the flirting.

It was late July when mine and Shiloh's relationship dynamic changed drastically. She conspired with Hunter to do something that I never saw coming. We didn't have to work that night so Hunter suggested that we go to a party. Hunter was the only one who knew it was my birthday and we had a long standing tradition of essentially getting shit faced and taking home several women. It usually turned into an orgy of liquor, drugs and sex.

Shiloh and Melanie had been in Massachusetts for the past few days visiting Melanie's family before school started in a few weeks.

"Brian, man! We haven't gone out and partied just the two of us in a month and a half!" Hunter was saying. "I get it that you're all into my sister, and I'm not suggesting you take any girls home, but everything else is fair game right?"

I laughed. "I thought you said no drugs," I pointed out.

"I did. But I meant no drugs around Shiloh." His voice became pleading. "Come on! Let's go have some fun like we used to. I promise I'll take all the fine ladies for myself."

It had been a while since Hunter and I had spent any time together and I was actually in the mood for some fun, so it didn't take much for him to convince me. We had a few drinks before heading out and I was feeling pretty good. Hunter insisted on driving saying that his high end BMW was more of a chick magnet. I let it slide only because I knew that although my car was much better, I wasn't looking to score. Who was I to begrudge my best friend his annual sex fest?

We pulled up into his father's driveway and I turned to him giving him a confused look.

"I just wanted to grab something," he said as he got out of the car. "Come on. Help me get these boxes of liquor so we can get going."

I followed him into the house. The place was dark. I reached over to turn on the light but before I could hit the switch the lights came on and I was greeted with a crowd of people yelling "SURPRISE!"

At the front of the crowd was Shiloh. If I thought she was beautiful before I was kidding myself compared to the way she looked. She wore this filmy, shimmery, very short silver dress that hugged her body like a leotard. Her hair was pulled back and done up with soft curls cascading over her shoulders. Her bright eyes shined and she wore a smile that nearly brought me to my knees. As she walked toward me there was no one else in the room. All I could see was her. When she stopped in front of me she spoke in a soft tone.

"Happy birthday, baby."

I don't know how it was possible but my throat went dry while my mouth watered. I would've been completely lost in her if it hadn't been for Hunter breaking the spell by giving me a hard slap on the shoulder.

"Breathe Brian!" he said laughing. "Happy birthday, bro." Then he turned to all the people gathered and shouted, "Time to party!"

There were shouts and instantly music started playing. Hunter had set up a full bar inside and out on the back patio. A stage was situated near the back doors on the patio. Paul and Matt's band were playing. But, I was focused on the most amazingly exquisite woman there.

"When did you get back?" I asked.

She smiled. "Last night. Hunter and I had this planned before I left. He just got it all put together while I was out of town. What do you think?"

I stood back and drank in the sight of her. "I think it's perfect."

She laughed and slapped me on the chest. "I mean the party!"

I pulled her closer and looked into her eyes. "I think you are so amazing for doing this for me."

Looking back, I'm pretty sure that was the moment I knew I was in love with Shiloh.

We drank beer, sang along with the band and had a great time late into the night. Hunter and Shiloh had gotten a huge birthday cake and when the time came to blow out the candles Shiloh got everyone together. She nodded to Matt and he handed her his guitar. Shiloh positioned herself in a chair across from me. She looked a little nervous. She flexed her fingers a few times before she strummed the guitar. She gave me a quick smile. And then she sang.

"Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday, dear Brian

Happy birthday to you."

Four simple lines. Lines that had been sung by children and adults for generations. But those few lines were like a key that unlocked my soul. Her voice was like that of an angel. Everyone stood quiet for a few minutes after she finished. She handed the guitar back to Matt then walked over to me. She sat on my lap straddling me.

"You need to blow out your candles," she whispered.

I had never heard her voice sound so seductive. Her words were like sexual vocabulary. She got off my lap, took my hand and led me over to the cake where twenty-three candles blazed. I took a deep breath, leaned down and blew out the candles. I didn't even wait for a piece of the cake. I had to have Shiloh and right then. I pulled her along with me as I walked away from the table. I stepped up to Hunter and put my hand out.

"Give me your keys," I said.

Hunter grinned then became serious as he dug the keys out of his pocket. He put them in my hand but grabbed me and wouldn't let go.

"Don't you dare hurt her," he whispered to me.

I looked back at him. "Not a chance."

He nodded and let my hand go. I knew I didn't have to tell him to stay at his dad's house for the night.

### *****

I had to have physical contact with her all the way back to my apartment so I kept her hand in mine. Every so often I would bring it to my lips and kiss it. I had to keep my eyes focused on the road. If I looked at her in that sexy dress there's no doubt in my mind I would've had to pull the car off the road and devour her. I didn't know what was going to happen once we were alone in my room, but I knew I didn't want to share her with anyone else tonight. I wanted to touch her and kiss her. I needed it. She had shown me a side of her that was more sensual by calling me 'baby' and straddling me in front of everyone. I was so turned on I had to do a mental cool down session. Her small show of raw sexuality had my libido in a tail spin.

When we got inside the apartment her lips were on mine before the door closed. I absentmindedly tossed the keys on the table. Her body was pressed against me, warm and soft. My hands couldn't find a way to stop caressing her. That silky fabric she was wearing combined with her pretty scent was driving me absolutely insane. Her hands were running through my hair as our mouths and tongues made love to each other. I backed her against the door and pulled her leg up to my waist. My hand rubbed her bare thigh. No, not bare. She wore sheer thigh high stockings. Oh fuck! I wasn't sure my brain could comprehend the implications of that. I pulled her other leg up and she wrapped her legs around my waist. I could've taken her right then and there up against that door. But something in my head clicked. I wanted to cherish this woman. Make love to her with everything I had in me. I had to slow things down.

I pulled my face away from her. There was a lamp on in the living room and I could see her features.

"I want to make love to you, Shiloh."

She gave me a small smile and nod. "Make love to me."

Oh hell. Her voice was so breathy and sweet. I carried her to my room and lay her on the bed. I turned on the light beside the bed. I needed to see her in all her glory. I stood at the end of the bed and took one foot in my hands. She still wore her strappy low silver heels. I took my time loosening the straps and removing the shoe then removed the other one. I kissed her stocking covered feet while my fingers caressed her legs. I kissed my way up each of her legs memorizing every inch of her skin. The bottom of her dress had slipped up over her thighs. I stared in awe at her white lacy thong. A garter belt rested just above those lovely panties. I released each of the stockings and slowly rolled them down her legs while trailing my fingers with my mouth. Her skin was like silk and she tasted so sweet. I made my way back up her leg to her inner thigh. I could smell the faint hint of her most sacred place and it made me harder than I'd ever been. I needed to taste her. I needed to send her over the edge and drink in all her of her.

I had to slow down. I had to connect with her. I slid up her body. Her breathing was fast. Her fingers weaved their way into my hair and each touch was like fire. She tilted her head and looked into my eyes as I came face to face with her. Her lips called to me and I wrapped my hand into her hair as I plunged my tongue into her mouth. Holy shit! Her mouth was hot and wet and her tongue caressed mine in a way that made me imagine just what she would feel like wrapped around my shaft. My hand followed the line of her slim waist up underneath her dress until I reached her breast. My fingers met with more lace and I groaned into her mouth. Her nipple was so hard and taut. I pulled it between my fingers and lightly pinched. Her body arched in response and she let out a soft cry into my mouth. If she did that again I was a goner. I needed to get things under control. She was driving me so close to edge I wouldn't last another minute the way her body was rubbing against me and the way her hands were now making their way down my back.

I pulled back and she grabbed my shirt hauling it over my head. Her fingers were instantly on my skin burning a trail down my back until she reached the top of my jeans.

"Take them off," she commanded.

Oh I had no idea she could get any sexier until she said that. I fidgeted with my jeans until I finally got the button and zipper undone. With one quick move I slid them away and kicked them off the edge of the bed. I was fully unclothed and there was something really erotic about my naked skin against her. But the dress had to go. I wanted her in nothing but her bra and thong. I slid the dress over her head and leaned back to look at her. She was breathtaking. I gently rubbed my fingers over her breasts. Her nipples were so hard they strained against the white lace. I reached over and unclasped the front of her bra liberating her beautiful breasts. My mouth needed to have those perfect nipples. I leaned in and put my lips over one of them. It was so firm and my tongue flickered over it as I sucked it into my mouth. Her back arched and she gasped. I watched her face and more blood rushed to my groin. I gave the same attention to her other nipple enjoying the reaction of her body. I slowly slid my tongue down to her belly kissing her skin as I went. I had a very special destination in mind. And once I got there I intended to make her lose control.

My fingers slid under the string of her tiny lace thong. I slid it down her legs and past her feet. Seeing her completely revealed was like standing in a museum looking at the most treasured artwork known to man. She had a small strip of perfectly trimmed hair between her legs. I placed a hand on each of her inner thighs and slowly spread her open to reveal the most lovely sight I had ever beheld. She was pink and pretty and moist. I almost came right then. I slid one of my fingers slowly along her lips. She was so wet and hot. I could have stared at her pussy all night long while I massaged it. Her clit was tight and I rolled my thumb over it slowly. She pressed into my fingers as more moisture accumulated. I had to taste her. I leaned in and pushed my tongue into her pretty pink folds. I pushed until my tongue was surrounded by her tight wetness. Her juices were like honey in my mouth. Letting my tongue replace my thumb on her clit I set a rhythm and put one finger inside her. My dick responded by pulsing almost painfully. With each lick and stroke she became hotter and wetter. I looked up at her. Her head was thrown back and she was practically gasping. I wanted to watch her come. Her breathing escalated and I slipped another finger inside her groaning as I felt her muscles clenching. She was getting close.

"Brian! Brian!" It was a whispered chant.

Hearing her saying my name was making me crazy. The pulsing inside her was getting faster and I knew she was on the edge. I amped up the strokes of my tongue and twisted my fingers to find just the right spot inside. That sent her over the edge. She cried out my name as her hips pushed into my face and fingers. The muscles around my fingers tightened in a frantic pulsing and clenching as her sweet juices flowed over me. I lowered my mouth and sucked at her sweet opening drinking in every last drop of her nectar. My free hand wrapped around my cock and squeezed trying to strangle the overflow of blood. I wasn't going to come until I had her wrapped around me.

When her orgasm subsided I pulled my fingers out and sucked them into my mouth. Her legs relaxed and her breathing slowed. I pulled her into my arms and held her, kissing her jaw, her neck and her lips. Watching her release was the most incredible thing I'd ever seen. I wanted to do that to her over and over again just so I could see her face and watch her body. She was the essence of sensual sexuality.

When she finally opened her eyes she smiled. "Make love to me."

How could I possibly refuse?

I positioned myself over her. She spread her legs apart and reached down. Her fingers curled around my cock almost knocking the wind out of me. She guided the head to her hot entrance. I pushed forward gently letting the tip inside.

"Oh fuck baby! You're so tight!"

Slowly I pushed a little further letting her body adjust. With each small stroke her heat was enveloping me. Her canal was getting wetter and I was pretty sure this was what it must feel like to die and go to heaven. When I was finally buried deep inside her I couldn't move. I held her tight knowing that if she moved her hips I was done. She felt better than anything I had ever experienced. She was warm, tight and wet around me. I fought to regain composure. When the throbbing finally subsided I slowly moved inside her. The feel of her was unlike anything else. I knew then and there I didn't want to be inside any other woman ever again. There was no other woman on earth who could possibly feel this incredible.

As I slid back and forth slowly I regained control. Her hips met me perfectly with each thrust. But it wasn't enough. I needed more of her. I put my hands on her face and pulled her mouth to mine.

It was like time stopped. The sensation of her soft mouth combined with the movement of our bodies connected in the most intimate way possible was beyond anything I could have ever imagined. Our rhythm was perfectly in synch. We matched each other like a flawlessly choreographed harmony. For the first time in my life sex had transcended beyond the physical. My heart was overflowing with emotion that I didn't understand but had no desire to stop. This was it. She was the one. My mind was no longer a part of the equation. I was ultimately and completely lost to this woman. I wrapped an arm around her almost desperately pulling her as close as physically possible. I needed her.

With a sweetness and sensuality that was beyond reason she wrapped her legs around me and increased the rhythm. It was like something splintered inside me tearing away a shield and pulling something from deep within me. I cried out her name over and over crushing her to me as her walls clenched around me and I let go. And as our ecstasy took over I knew I was finally where I belonged. I was home.

I kept her wrapped in my arms. I couldn't put any distance between us. A blissful exhaustion washed over me. I started to drift off while I stayed inside her. Then I heard her sweet voice.

"I love you," she whispered sleepily.

### Chapter 12

Shiloh

I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. All I could do was lie still and relish the feeling of Brian's arms and legs wrapped around me. His head was tucked against my chest and I could feel his slow, steady breath fanning across my skin. My mind flashed back to the night before. Every sensation was a crystal clear memory embedded in my heart. I hadn't known what it would be like the first time with him. I'd thought about it so much the week before his birthday. I knew I was ready but I still felt nervous that I might disappoint him. He had been with a lot of women, many of which were much more experienced in pleasing a man than I was. But, when the time came my nerves were calm. The way our bodies seemed to meld in a beautiful, sensual dance was effortless as if we were made for each other. Or, at least, that was the way it felt for me. I hoped he felt the same way.

Brian shifted slightly, his arms wrapping a little tighter around my waist. My heart raced. I wanted to savor the moment a little longer. Because, if truth be told, there was this tiny little part of me that was afraid that what we shared would change things between us. I didn't think that he was using me, but there was a miniscule worry in the back of my mind that making love might not have meant as much to him as it did for me. I wanted him to continue to want me as much as I wanted him. I knew from our first date that I would fall hard for him. There were times I even tried to convince myself not to. But the heart has a way of doing what it wants regardless of the mind. Sharing something so wonderful and intimate last night sent me past any doubt. I had fallen in love with Brian Curtis. It was exhilarating and scary at the same time. My heart soared while my mind feared he wouldn't return my feelings. Being in love with someone like Brian put me in danger of getting my heart broken in a way that would be devastating for an unforeseeable amount of time. Yet, I still found myself hoping that he would feel for me what I felt for him.

I wasn't the type of girl to let myself get too involved with guys. It wasn't that I didn't want to, I was just usually too busy with school to take the time. I'd gone out on a few dates but I generally wasn't emotionally invested. It was right after my mom died that I had a moment of weakness and let things go too far. Maybe I needed to feel close to someone, I don't know. I had sex for the first time with someone I didn't love. It was stupid, but at the time it seemed like a good idea. He was a nice guy but the chemistry between us was pretty bland. So was the sex. It was awkward and unsatisfying. I don't harbor any horrible feelings about it. In fact, I've always felt pretty indifferent about the situation. Until now. After what I experienced with Brian I wished that he would have been my first. But, even if he wasn't the first person I had sex with he was definitely the first person I'd fallen in love with. I couldn't describe how I knew it was love. I just felt it. It was a feeling that came from the deepest regions of my being. Something as simple as him smiling at me or holding my hand felt special.

Aside from a few displays of jealousy early on, Brian had relaxed. It was as though he learned to trust that even if another guy showed interest I only wanted him. He backed off and let me be myself. I figured that was a sign of trust. He listened to me with genuine interest. He wasn't some freaky possessive boyfriend who had to dictate my life. Although I suspected it took a great deal of effort for him to keep from pummeling guys who hit on me. I had to admit I was a little flattered.

"Mmmm..." Brian murmured as his leg wrapped a little tighter around mine.

I stroked my fingers through his hair with one hand while the other glided over his back. I felt chill bumps rise on his skin. I thought of the way he dedicated himself to pleasing me the night before and suddenly I wanted to reciprocate. His fingers pressed into my skin.

"Good morning," he said lazily.

"Good morning," I replied.

"Did you know that you are the best pillow in the world?" he asked. I could feel his cheek as he smiled against my chest.

I gave a small laugh. "No. I had no idea."

One of his hands slid from around my waist up to my breast. He caressed it making my nipple harden. His fingers tugged at it, each light pinch causing the muscles between my legs to constrict. It was unbelievable how easily he could turn me on. I was losing focus. But, nature had a way of helping me keep my sanity. I needed to go to the bathroom and I wanted to shower and brush my teeth before I could entertain the possibility of being intimate with Brian again. I pulled his wonderful hand into mine.

"I need to use the bathroom," I told him.

He leaned back unwrapping himself from me. I quickly got up and went into the bathroom. After relieving myself I found a clean towel folded in the cabinet. I couldn't help noticing how clean and neat his bathroom was. I'd been in there before but never opened the cabinets. Usually when I was hanging out at Brian and Hunter's apartment I used the small half bath at the front of the hallway. Since the time I fell asleep watching Lord of the Rings I hadn't spent the night. Brian had only slept at my place twice. And most of our clothes had remained on. I didn't want to overstep any boundaries but the large shower called out to me. I made a quick survey of the cleaning options. A basic bar of soap and some J Crew shampoo. Washing my hair was definitely out. I wrapped my hair up in a loose bun. Turning on the faucet I stepped into the shower letting the hot water flow over my pleasantly aching body. I closed my eyes and let the water drench my skin. Just as I was about to reach for the soap the shower door opened. Brian's hand closed over the bar of soap.

"Let me," he said in a low voice.

I felt totally exposed and a little self conscious. I tried to turn around but he held me in place. I couldn't look up into his face.

He tilted my chin up with his finger. There was a look of desire in eyes, but it was mixed with something tender like he knew what I was feeling.

He gave me a warm smile. "You don't ever have to hide your body from me. You are so beautiful, Shiloh."

He started with my fingertips lathering soap up my arms. He kept his gaze on each inch of skin he covered. When he got to my shoulders his hands crossed around my back as he leaned closer to me. He placed a soft kiss on my lips as he washed by back. His hands slid over my behind lovingly caressing. When he finished there he curled around to my stomach. His lips never left mine. He slid his hands further up until his soapy fingers reached my breasts. I leaned my head back instinctively. I closed my eyes and drank in the sensation of his touch. As sensual as it was, it didn't feel like he was trying to make it lead to sex. He was just washing me slowly. He kneeled down and washed my legs keeping his fingers just below that aching part of me. I had to lean against the wall of the shower when his fingers finally stroked between my legs. The slippery soap combined with the warmth of his hands was intoxicating. I spread my legs a little wider to give him better access. He massaged softly and I could feel the heat building inside me. His fingers trailed away and the loss of his touch almost made me whimper. He pulled me under the shower and guided the water with his hands to make sure all the soap was rinsed away. He quickly cleaned his own body. I was nervous about looking at his nakedness in the bright bathroom light. Last night I didn't get a chance to really see him in the dim lamp light. In fact, I'd never actually really looked at a penis in person. My one other sexual encounter had been in the dark. When Brian was finished rinsing he turned off the shower. He grabbed the towel and wrapped it around me before getting his own towel. We dried off and he wrapped his towel around his waist. I almost laughed at the thought that this was the second time I had seen him almost naked after a shower. He still looked just as appetizing. He handed me a toothbrush from a package he had in a drawer. He brushed his own teeth then went into the bedroom.

While I scrubbed the toothbrush over my teeth I contemplated how different we were when it came to modesty. Brian seemed completely uninhibited and I envied him a little. I mean, we'd had sex! There was no reason I should feel weird about seeing his naked body or showing him mine. I rinsed my mouth and looked into the mirror. Steeling my nerves I decided to take a leap of courage. I turned and left the bathroom. When I entered the bedroom Brian's towel was hanging over a chair and he was lying in bed with the sheet pulled up to his waist. He watched me intently. It was now or never. I held my breath and dropped my towel next to his leaving myself completely visible. His eyes narrowed as they grazed over my body. There was no denying that he liked what he saw. This boosted my confidence a little more so I pushed forward with my plan.

I leaned over and slowly pulled the sheet back. My breathing quickened with every inch of him that I exposed. I tentatively checked his expression. There was no hint of amusement, only careful consideration. He was allowing me to explore a new experience without judgment. His arms were folded behind his head. His body was completely open as if he wanted me to know that I had free reign to do whatever I needed to feel completely comfortable with him. And I wanted that so badly at that moment. I wanted to know every inch of him. I wanted him to be mine. Fully. Utterly. Absolutely.

As I dropped the sheet to the floor I finally let myself look at him. Something locked deep within me opened up like a flower spreading it's petals to the warm sun. I took in everything. The warmth of his face. The definition of each muscular line from his arms to his chest to his stomach. The swirls of color and bold black ink across his skin. My eyes traveled lower, slowly and cautiously until the smooth expanse of his abdomen gave way to a light trail of hair that beckoned for me to follow it downward. He was neatly trimmed and I couldn't help the errant thought that he manscaped. It would have been enough to distract me from my reverie if my eyes hadn't landed on his very large, very hard penis. I took in a breath. It was so stunning. I knew he was very well endowed from the feel of him the night before. But seeing it with my own eyes was a whole different experience. I wanted to touch it. I wanted to taste it. I'd never done that so in an instant I felt my self confidence start to dwindle as my lack of sexual experience weighed on my nerves.

Like a psychic, Brian sat up on the side of the bed. His arms went around my waist and he pulled me to him. His head rested against my stomach. As if to give some levity to the situation he pulled me down on the bed burying kisses all over my waist. I squealed as his mouth tickled me. He turned me so I was lying on my back. His expression became warm and tender as he looked into my eyes.

"I don't ever want you to feel uncomfortable with me," he said before kissing the tip of my nose. "I want you to know that I think you are the sexiest, most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. But, even beyond that, you are kind and funny and cool as hell. You do something to me that I don't know how to explain. All I know is that when I'm not with you I want to be. And when I'm with you there's no place else I'd rather be."

I winced internally. It was my turn to make some sort of emotional confession. Given the circumstances I went with my gut.

Swallowing hard I forced myself to speak. "I've only been with one other person and it was pretty much a disaster. I guess I just feel like I don't know what I'm doing."

Okay. At least that much was out there even if I did feel epically stupid.

He smiled wickedly. "From what I can tell after last night, you're doing everything right. I've never felt anything so amazing."

I gave him a confused look. "Really?'

He licked his lips. "You have no idea."

The look in his eyes renewed my confidence – and my libido. I wanted him. And I wanted to take him. I pushed my hand against his chest and rolled over on top of him. I kissed him leisurely savoring the feel of his mouth. His hands ran smoothly from my waist to my hips gripping lightly. I could feel his rigid length hot against my skin. I pulled my lips from his making a trail across his jaw to his neck. He shuddered as I nipped at his ear. My mouth continued it's journey down his neck toward his chest. I took a nipple in my mouth and fluttered the little hoop with my tongue. His hands clenched tighter and he let out a soft groan. Encouraged, I did the same thing to the other nipple. He pressed his erection against my belly and I smiled. I ventured further down kissing and licking his skin everywhere my lips landed. He wove his fingers into my hair. I glanced up and his glazed eyes were staring down at me. Something about him watching me made me feel almost wicked. I wrapped my fingers around the base of his cock and felt it jump in response. Brian's lips parted slightly as his breathing sped up. I smiled and let the tip of my tongue glide up the smooth length of him. He drew in a ragged breath when my lips surrounded the tip. I pulled him further into my mouth never taking my eyes off his face. His head tilted back and the muscles in his neck tightened as his jaw clenched. His fingers curled tighter in my hair. I slowly took him in until he reached the back of my throat while slipping my fingers around his balls. Gently kneading them I pulled back until the tip of my tongue felt the ridge of his head. I flicked my tongue quickly.

"Oh fuck, Shiloh!" Brian gasped.

I continued to move my mouth up and down, each time doing the little tongue flicker. His cock had gotten impossibly harder and more engorged with every stroke of my mouth until I felt it throbbing on my tongue and I knew he was close. Surprisingly, the thought of him coming in my mouth had me so turned on that I quickened the rhythm. Brian's entire body began to tense while the throbbing in my mouth intensified. Brian's head tilted back. His eyes were closed and his mouth opened.

"Shiloh! Holy fuck, Shiloh!" he cried out.

Hot, salty liquid shot against the back of my throat and I swallowed hungrily. I watched Brian's face contort into something like painful ecstasy. He pulled me off him and twisted us so he was over me and between my legs in one swift move. When he opened his eyes there was an animalistic hunger there. A moment later he was buried inside me. I nearly came from the feel of him filling me up. His mouth devoured mine. There was no tenderness between us, only unbridled passion. With every deep thrust I pushed back so that he penetrated me so thoroughly I could feel his head against my cervix. My hands clenched his butt pulling him with each stroke, my fingernails digging into his skin. I couldn't get enough. I felt the fire in my belly growing hotter until I thought I would explode. My legs tightened around him.

"Yes, come hard for me, baby," he groaned.

His words reverberated through me sending me over the edge. My orgasm ripped through me so hard I thought I was going to pass out.

"Brian! Oh god, Brian!" I was screaming.

"Fuck yes, Shiloh!" he called out as he joined me in absolute bliss.

And just as my orgasm came to an end another one rolled over me like a tidal wave.

Brian stroked my hair softly as I lay limp as a wet noodle against him. Every ounce of energy had been drained from my body. I lay with my head on his chest, eyes closed, as I listened to the sound of his heart beating. His breathing became slow and even and his fingers came to a stop resting on my back. In that quiet, peaceful moment everything felt right.

### Chapter 13

Brian

It was on the tip of my tongue. As I came down from the euphoria Shiloh had given me I almost said it. Those three little words that had up until that moment been elusive throughout my entire life. Yet, there they were swirling around my brain. Something deep within me knew that this overwhelming feeling had to be love. Not that I had never felt love before. I loved Hunter like a brother. But, this was different. This was all consuming. I'd heard Shiloh whisper the words to me the night before. But, she was half asleep so I didn't know if she really meant it or if they were simply a product of what I considered to be the most incredible sex in the universe. What if I said it and one day she realized she deserved better? Or what if she didn't feel the same way? She could crush my heart in an instant. She was beautiful, smart and classy. She came from a world so opposite my own. She grew up being loved and cared for. I had no concept of what that was like. What if I fucked it up? How could I live with myself if I tarnished this in any way? She was precious and perfect.

So, I swallowed the words. I decided that I couldn't worry about where our relationship was headed. I had to stay in the present and cherish what we had right then. She had the power to destroy me if she woke up one day and realized she could do better. I couldn't let anyone know they had that kind of power over me. If she knew about my past she would probably run away from me screaming. I needed to stay firmly planted in the moment. She liked me like this and I wasn't about to taint that by letting myself open up to her. Telling her I love her might create expectations. She would want to know more about me than I was willing to share. And I would tell her. She had that effect on me. And, there were things even Hunter didn't know. Things that I'd buried deep. Things that I had done that were unforgivable. No one could ever know about that other part of me. I had come too far to let my guard down.

Before I could let my mind wander too far down that dark path I focused on the feel of Shiloh's body on mine, the softness of her hair. She had a way of pulling me away from destructive thoughts. With her I could almost believe I was okay. I wasn't willing to jeopardize that by creating emotional binds that tight. I could continue to love her like this and nothing had to change. Yep. This was perfect. With that thought I finally let myself drift off to sleep.

### *****

It was dark when I awoke. I hadn't slept that hard since – well ever. For a minute I was disoriented. There was a thin strip of dim light coming through the crack in my curtains. Something was missing. As I cleared the cobwebs from my brain I realized that I was lying in my bed alone. I reached over only to feel cool, empty sheets. Had I only dreamed of making love to Shiloh and falling asleep with her in my arms? A cold emptiness gripped me in the center of my chest. I flung my legs to the side until my feet met the floor. I felt desperation weave it's way up my spine. Then I heard muffled voices and laughter coming from the living room. My heart kicked back into gear at the sound of Shiloh's angelic laugh. I ran the back of my hand across my forehead feeling the cold sheen of sweat. I took a quick shower and put on a tee shirt and sweat pants before going into the living room.

I felt myself physically relax when Shiloh came into view. She and Hunter were sitting on the couch facing the TV. The sounds of gunfire and shouting came through the speakers. They each held a game controller and were focused on the screen.

"That's bullshit!" Hunter yelled. "You fucking cheated!"

Shiloh laughed. "You just can't handle getting your ass kicked by your little sister. Don't be such a baby!"

I stood and watched for a few minutes. Neither one of them knew I was there. Hunter's character re-spawned and I watched with growing admiration and pride as Shiloh guided her character around the corner of a building and took him out with a clean headshot.

"What the fuck?" Hunter protested.

I was getting turned on just watching her. She was a badass. In all fairness to Hunter, this really wasn't his kind of game. He was more into fighting games. I usually played the shooter games. Greg and I had spent countless hours playing against other teams online while getting wasted.

As I walked around the couch I got a better view of Shiloh and I nearly choked. She was leaned back into the cushions with her legs propped out on the table in front of her. Her very bare legs. She wore one of my tee shirts and a pair of my gym shorts. Even though the shirt practically swallowed her I could picture her gorgeous body underneath. It was so damn sexy.

"You're girlfriend is a fucking cheater," Hunter said.

Girlfriend. Hmmm. It sounded so strange yet so right. Shiloh, my girlfriend? We hadn't really talked about it, come think of it. It somehow made our relationship seem more exclusive. Yeah, we needed to figure that out.

I grabbed the controller out of his hand and took a seat next to Shiloh.

"From what I could see, she was handing you your ass fair and square," I said. "Let me show you how it's done, son."

I pressed resume. I used some evasive maneuvers to keep out of her line of fire. Hunter had poorly positioned himself giving her the better vantage point. I ran across the street and ducked behind another building. Going inside I climbed the stairs and found an opening that faced her direction. With a quick firing of my gun I took her out.

"Shit!" she exclaimed. "How did you do that?"

I laughed. "Practice. Lots and lots of practice."

"You probably shouldn't play against him," Hunter advised her. "Brian and Greg spent almost every night for a year playing this game."

I put the controller down and draped my arm over Shiloh's shoulder. "You guys hungry?"

They both nodded. I ordered a pizza. Hunter switched to a fighting game. I pulled Shiloh so she sat between my legs with her back against my stomach. I grabbed the controller and Hunter and I proceeded to beat the hell out of each other in a virtual boxing ring. I was holding my own pretty well until Shiloh shifted and her ass rubbed against my cock. That slight movement distracted me enough that I was too slow to block a punch. My character went down.

"KO!" Hunter cheered.

The doorbell rang and Hunter jumped up to answer it.

"That was all your fault," I whispered in her ear.

She smiled and rubbed against me. I groaned. I reached between us and adjusted my cock. One slight little rub and I was hard as a rock. I let my hand slip under her and rubbed my fingers between her legs.

"Two can play that game, ya know," I said as I kissed the back of her neck.

Hunter brought the pizza in the living room and we ate while watching a movie. When the pizza was gone I leaned back and pulled Shiloh closer. She leaned her head against my chest as I wrapped my arms around her. It was amazing how comfortable it felt for the three of us to just hang out like that. Hunter seemed totally cool with the situation. Hunter and I had chilled out and watched movies or played video games plenty of times. But, whenever either of us brought women home it was straight to the bedroom until we kicked them out. Hunter and Shiloh were my two favorite people and I felt happy.

Hunter's phone chimed and he checked the message. A moment later he stood and gave us a wave.

"Sorry to break up this family moment, but I gotta go," he said.

It was probably a booty call.

Shiloh stretched and sat up. "I should probably go, too. It's getting late."

Before I could protest, Hunter put a hand up. "You can stay. I won't be back tonight and we have to work the next few nights, so make the most of the time you've got."

I gave him a curious look. Hunter was actually encouraging his little sister to spend the night with his best friend? What the hell was going on? Hunter gave me a look that told me he didn't want to discuss whatever was going on right then. I gave a slight nod but made a mental note to find out about whatever he was up to the next time we were alone.

After Hunter left Shiloh stared at the door wearing a confused expression.

"Is it just me or did he just act really suspicious?" she asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know. Hunter can be randomly strange." I pulled her on top of me and kissed her. "I'm more concerned about the threat you made, though."

"What threat?"

"Something about leaving and going home." I buried my face in her neck kissing and licking lightly. "After the night and morning we shared, it isn't nice to say such hurtful things."

She sighed and wrapped her arms around my neck. Her body relaxed into me. Her hips straddled mine and I was dying to tear off those shorts and bury myself deep inside her. But, first, we needed to talk. I reluctantly pulled my mouth from her neck.

"Shiloh?"

She must have sensed the seriousness of my voice because she sat up and looked me in the eyes.

"Can I ask you something?" I started to feel a hint of anxiety.

"Of course," she replied.

"Bear with me. I'm new to this so I'm not sure exactly what to say," I placed my hand on her cheek. Yeah. I wanted her. And only her. And I wanted her to be mine. "Something Hunter said earlier got me thinking. He referred to you as my girlfriend."

She blushed.

"I've never had a girlfriend before. I've never wanted a girlfriend. But, when Hunter called you my girlfriend I realized that now I do want that. With you. For me, it's a big step. But, the thought that you could see other guys because we didn't make this more official drives me crazy," I explained.

She smiled and put her hand over mine. "Me too. I mean, the thought of you with another girl, that is."

I raised my eyebrows. "So, are you good with us being exclusive?"

"Definitely," she said.

I actually let out a relieved sigh then chuckled.

"What's funny?" she asked.

I shook my head. "I have a girlfriend. Who would've thought?"

She gave me a strange look. "How is it that you've never had a girlfriend? Wasn't there ever someone you cared about?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Do you care for me?"

I stared at the genuine question in her eyes. If only I could tell her just how much. "Yes. I care about you, Shiloh."

"Good. Because I care about you, too," she said sweetly.

I pulled her to me and kissed my girlfriend for the first time.

We made love on the couch then again in the bed until neither of us could move another muscle. Each time it was as good or better than the time before. I had never wanted to have sex with a woman so much. I could make love to Shiloh every day and night and it would only make me want her more. I slipped into a blissful slumber with my body wrapped around hers.

### *****

The shrill ringing of my phone rudely interrupted an exquisite dream I was having involving me, Shiloh and a pair of handcuffs. I ignored the phone when I felt her ass cheeks hugging my raging hard cock. I pushed my hips forward and found her warm, wetness. I slid my hand down and began rubbing her clit as I pushed further inside her from behind. She moaned and her hips started to move against me. Just the thought of waking her up like that and responding so quickly had me close to coming. With every stroke she got even more wet and her muscles were already milking me the way they did before she was about to come. When she moaned louder and I felt her clamping around my cock I couldn't hold back. I let go and came deep inside her.

The phone started ringing, yet again interrupting me and my woman. Only this time it wasn't a dream. I reached over and grabbed it from the bedside table.

"Hello?" I growled into the phone.

"Is this Mr. Curtis?" a man's voice asked.

"Yeah. What do you want? It's nearly four in the morning."

"I'm sorry for waking you, sir," he said. "I'm officer Isaac Andrews. I'm calling because your mother was taken to the hospital a few hours ago. She's in critical condition. You were the only contact we could find."

I sighed. In the blink of an eye my night had gone from pure fantasy to a nightmare. I got the information from Officer Andrews and hung up. Even though I didn't have a good relationship with my mother I certainly didn't wish harm upon her. But, she was an addict and I always knew that one day I might get a call saying she was either in jail, in the hospital or dead. I guess that day had finally come. And with it all the memories came crashing down upon me.

Shiloh slipped a hand on my chest. "Is everything okay?"

The genuine concern in her voice made my heart clench tightly. I had to placate her. She didn't need to know about any of this. I calmed my anger.

"Yeah. Everything's fine." I pulled her hand up and kissed it. "It's just a friend of mine partied a little too hard and needs a ride."

She made a move to get up. "I'll go with you," she said as she rubbed her eyes.

"No!" I replied hastily, then lowered my voice. I leaned down and kissed her. "Get some sleep, baby. It won't take long. I'll be back in an hour or so."

"Are you sure? I really don't mind going with you."

I mustered a warm smile. "You need to rest because when I get back we're going to finish what we started."

Her arm wound around my neck and she kissed me. "Mmmm...I'll be waiting, then."

I quickly dressed and left the room. My eyes felt like they were coated in sand. The minute I closed the bedroom door behind me the old familiar rage started simmering in my gut. I crossed over to Hunter's room. I hadn't done any drugs since Shiloh and I began dating but I knew where Hunter kept his stash. I cut out four lines on the counter and snorted them with Hunter's straw then stood and closed my eyes as that old familiar rush kicked in. After a few minutes I was ready to deal with things. I grabbed my keys off the counter and went out the door. Driving to the hospital I thought about Shiloh to keep the demons at bay. I realized I had experienced yet another first tonight. I left a woman sleeping in my bed without me there. Not just any woman either. My girlfriend. The thought made me want to turn around and go home and crawl into bed next to her warm body. But, I couldn't. My mother was lying in a hospital bed holding on by a thread.

The officer had explained that my mother had been thrown from a moving vehicle onto the sidewalk. A woman saw it out of her apartment window and called 9-1-1. When the paramedics arrived at the scene she was barely breathing and she appeared to have been badly beaten. Her heart stopped in the ambulance on the way to the hospital and they had to resuscitate her. They put a tube down her throat and she was on a ventilator in the ICU.

I pulled into the hospital parking lot and stared up at the building. My hands were shaking with the need to hit something. I pulled out my phone and tapped the screen. After two rings he answered.

"What's up? You okay?" Hunter asked groggily.

"I need you," I said. "I'm at the hospital."

"What? What happened? Are you hurt? Is Shiloh okay?"

I could hear him shuffling around getting dressed.

"It's my mom."

There was silence for several seconds.

"I'm on the way. Be there in ten."

The line went dead. I got out of the car and went into the lobby to wait. Ten minutes later Hunter came through the doors looking a little disheveled but alert. I could tell he'd had a pick me up as well. He walked up to me and put a hand on my shoulder.

"Let's do this," he said.

In the elevator I explained what happened. He looked as pissed as I was. When we got to the ICU we approached a nurse sitting at a desk.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"Yeah. I'm Brian Curtis, Caroline Bradford's son. This is my brother Hunter," I told her.

Her face fell into a look of sympathy. "I'm so sorry about your mom."

"Thanks. Can we see her?"

We followed her to one of the rooms that were separated from the nursing station by only a sliding glass door. We stepped into the room and I balled my fists so tight I could feel my nails digging into my palms. My mother was lying in the bed with tubes running from her body. A machine on one side of the bed made a rhythmic swooshing noise and on the other side was a another machine that dripped clear fluid into a thin tube connected to her arm. Above her head a screen displayed her heart rate and breathing pattern making a tiny beep with each beat of her heart. I scanned all around her avoiding looking directly at her. Finally my eyes narrowed in on her emaciated body looking so tiny in that big bed. Her face was almost unrecognizable. Her head was wrapped in a thick, white bandage. There were casts on one arm and a leg. Her skin was covered in bruises and scrapes. Her eyes were swollen shut, she had a gash across one cheek and a busted lip.

"She has a fractured arm and leg, several broken ribs, a fractured skull and several lacerations have been stitched up," the nurse explained.

"Will she live?" I asked.

"It's too soon to tell," she answered. "You would better off speaking to the doctor when he comes in."

"What time will he be here?"

"The doctors start their rounds at seven."

I glanced at the clock on the wall. Five thirty. The nurse started toward the door.

"I'll be out here if you need anything," she said before exiting.

I turned to Hunter. "Who the fuck does something like this?"

"I don't know, man." He just stood there shaking his head.

I couldn't sit there for an hour and a half. As it was I was having a hard time not punching a hole in the wall.

"I gotta get out of here," I stated.

"No problem. I'll drive us home and we can come back after we've gotten some sleep."

There was nothing more that I wanted than to go home. I needed Shiloh. Between the rage of seeing my mother and all the garbage from the past filling my head I needed one good thing. Hunter being there definitely helped, but his anger served to fuel my own and that could lead to a dangerous situation.

"I lied to her," I confessed on the way home.

Hunter glanced at me. "Lied to who?"

"Shiloh."

Hunter's jaw tightened. "What did I tell you Brian?"

I shook my head. "No man. Not like that. I lied and told her I was going to give a drunk friend a ride home."

He looked confused. "Why?"

"I don't know. I just...she's like this unblemished part of my life that I don't want to smudge with all my old shit, ya know?" I paused. "She could do so much better than a guy like me. I don't want to give her any reason to consider someone else."

Hunter pulled into a parking space in front of our building and turned off the car.

He sighed heavily. "Brian, Shiloh isn't the kind of girl who holds people's shit against them. In fact, she's probably one of the most nonjudgmental people I know. But, if you want her to trust you, you can't go off and lie to her."

"I know. I already planned on telling her the truth when we go inside."

Hunter's eyebrows raised. "Wait! Shiloh is in our apartment right now?"

"Yeah. So?"

Hunter grinned like the Cheshire cat. "Holy shit, man! I can't believe it!"

"Believe what? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

He started laughing. "Oh man! This is unreal! I didn't think it was even possible!"

Hunter laughing at me was only serving to piss me off even further. I grabbed him by the front of his shirt. "What the fuck is so funny?"

He raised his hands and his laughter started to subside. "I'm sorry. Really. I just never thought I'd see the day that you would fall in love."

Shit! "I'm not in love, asshole," I lied.

He eyed me skeptically. "Really? All these rules you've established over the years when it comes to girls. No names. No repeat performances. No dates. And no leaving a girl at the apartment when you aren't there. You've broken every one of your rules. That has to be love."

I was on the defensive. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. I won't lie. I care about her, but love? That's taking it a little too far. We've only known each other for a couple of months. Hardly enough time to fall in love."

Hunter opened his car door. "Yeah. You keep telling yourself that."

I couldn't say anything. Hunter had it nailed but I refused to admit it. Before opening the front door Hunter turned to me.

"Look, Brian, we've been best friends for over six years. I know you better than anyone. The past two months you've been a different person. And that's a good thing. You aren't wasted all the time. You're working more at the shop. You smile more. I mean really smile, not just the panty dropper smile. You haven't been in one fight. You seem happy, bro. Why fight it? You deserve to have something good in your life. And Shiloh is definitely good for you. I love you both. I just want to see you guys happy."

I gave him a hard look. "Are you high?"

"Maybe a little. Why?"

"I thought so because the Hunter I know and love would never spew that much emotional cotton candy at me at once."

Hunter laughed. "You're probably right. Must be a combination of all the weird shit going on tonight."

I nodded toward the door. "Can we go in now? I'd like to at least get a couple hours of sleep."

We went inside and I headed to bed. I needed to feel her near me.

### Chapter 14

Shiloh

I knew Brian was trying not wake me when I heard the light click of the bedroom door closing. It was considerate, but unnecessary considering I hadn't been able to sleep after he left. He seemed off earlier and I thought it was strange that he insisted I stay in bed. Maybe I was overreacting. I was a bit sleep deprived. I heard the muffled sound of his clothes as he undressed. The bed dipped from his weight as he climbed in next to me. Pretending to be asleep was stupid. I rolled over to face him.

"Is everything okay?" I asked.

He laid his head on my chest and wrapped his arms around me. "Yeah. I'm sorry if I woke you."

"You didn't."

I ran my fingers lightly over his back. He seemed to be seeking out comfort with the way he was holding onto me. I didn't have an opportunity to ask him anything else because within minutes he was fast asleep. I ran my fingers through his hair until I could no longer hold my eyes open.

### *****

Monday was the beginning of registration for classes so I had to get up early. As much as I wanted to stay at Brian's I needed to be home so I could get ready to go to the school. And, I knew if we spent the night together I wouldn't be getting any sleep, so I insisted that we stay at our respective apartments. I was actually a little surprised when he didn't try to change my mind. I hoped spending the weekend together hadn't been too much for him. I didn't want to wear out my welcome or monopolize his time to the point that he would get sick of me.

Classes would be starting in two weeks so I needed to be prepared. I was taking a heavy load my final year so I could graduate a semester ahead of schedule. I didn't know how that was going to work out with a boyfriend in the mix. When we talked about it Brian said that we would make it work. He wanted to pick up more clients at the shop anyway. He said I could come by the shop and study any time. I didn't know if I would be able to concentrate on studying with him in the same room.

I walked across campus after getting my registration finished. It was strange to be back in the college world after the past few months of having fun. I decided that for my last week and a half of summer break I would enjoy myself before getting back to the grind. After waiting an obscene amount of time in line at the book store I finally emerged with several bags of thick books trying to pull my arms off. I stepped out of the store and looked up. My breath caught, as it always did, when I saw Brian leaning against the wall. He gave me an amused smile as he saw me struggling with my bags. Seeing him wasn't making it easier. He was wearing a white tee shirt and faded jeans with his sunglasses perched on top of his head. Once again I mused over how it was possible for a man to look that damn good. Apparently several other female students agreed as I saw more than a few of them doing double takes as they passed by.

He pushed off from the wall and strode toward me. He grabbed the bags from my hands as if they were filled with feathers while leaning down to kiss me. I could have melted into a puddle right there on the spot. He never failed to make my knees weak with his kisses.

"What are you doing here?" I asked after I collected my wits.

He looked at me as if I should already know. "I'm here to carry your books to your car. Then I'm going to take you to lunch because I know you didn't eat anything for breakfast and in about twenty-two seconds your stomach is going to growl."

I laughed and put a hand on one hip. "Oh really?"

My stomach growled. I rolled my eyes.

We walked across campus toward the lot where my car was parked. I opened the trunk and Brian put the books inside.

"So where do you want to eat?" he asked.

I wasn't very familiar with the area, so I shrugged. "I don't know. Why don't you pick some place since you actually know what's around here."

He threw an arm over my shoulder. "Tourist."

"I tell you what – you pick the place and I'll drive. I have to learn my way around anyway."

"Deal," he said as he opened the passenger door and climbed in.

He gave me directions and we ended up at a diner. I gave him a questioning look.

"Best burgers ever," he said. "Trust me."

We sat at a booth near the front windows. The diner was like something out of the nineteen fifties with red vinyl seats, black and white checkerboard floors, and black Formica table tops with the little sparkling flecks. There was even a jukebox on the far wall. Although the music was more alternative college rock as opposed to The Platters, Chuck Berry or Elvis Presley. I like it instantly.

"So how did everything go this morning?" he asked as I perused the menu.

"Other than the long lines, no problems," I answered.

I noticed he hadn't bothered to pick up his menu.

"Do you already know what you want?"

He smiled. "Yep. I get the same thing every time I come here."

I raised an eyebrow. "Do you come here often?"

"Enough," he replied. He leaned forward. "I'm just kidding. I worked here for a few months my senior year in high school."

"Ohhh. Then you can make a recommendation?"

"Yeah. Double cheeseburger. Keep it simple," he confirmed.

A pretty waitress came over and eyed Brian appreciatively. He reached across the table and took my hand in his, which I had to admit made me feel a little giddy. The waitress got the hint and turned her eyes back to the tablet in her hand.

"So what can I get for you?"

Brian looked at me expectantly. I was certain I wouldn't be able to eat an entire double cheeseburger, but I ordered it anyway. With fries. And a milkshake. You had to order a milkshake when in a fifties style diner. It was a matter of principle. Brian ordered the same thing.

When the waitress left he turned to me. "So did you get all the classes you needed?"

"Yeah. It's going to be a grueling semester." That was no lie.

"I'm sure you're up for the challenge," he said.

"I hope so."

The waitress came back with our milkshakes. I took a sip of the thick concoction and practically rolled my eyes it was so good. Brian smiled.

"I told you. Wait until you taste the burger."

"I'm going to get fat hanging out with you," I joked.

"We'll just have to find ways to burn off the calories then." The look of lust in his eyes had me hot and bothered already. "So, can I come over tonight after work?"

"Only if you promise to give me a ride home from the bar," I replied.

"You're coming to the bar tonight?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Melanie and I decided we would send our last week or so of summer break off with a bang."

He chuckled. "I can help you with that."

I gave him a devilish smile. "I'm counting on it." When did I get so bold?

We were in the middle of eating our most delicious cheeseburgers when a tall blond woman walked over to our table. She looked Brian over for a minute before a smile lit up her face.

"Oh my god! Brian!," she gushed. "It's been a long time."

Her hand landed on his shoulder and I wanted to rip it off her arm. Brian didn't say anything but he removed her hand and looked up at her.

"I'm sorry. Do I know you?" he asked.

She practically pouted and I rolled my eyes. "It's Brianna. Don't you remember? Last year? Paul's party?"

For the first time I got to witness Brian's former personality. It was a little disturbing.

"I don't know who you are, but you're interrupting my date with my girlfriend so you should go away."

His voice was completely devoid of any emotion. Her jaw dropped.

"But what we shared..."

Brian's eyes were ice and his voice was low. "Go away."

She slunk back and walked away joining some of her friends at a table on the other side of the diner. I returned my attention to Brian. My appetite was gone. The cold façade had been replaced by a look of regret and shame.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

I collected myself. "You don't remember her, do you?"

He shook his head slowly. "No." He paused. "Shiloh, I really am sorry. If I could change things..."

I reached out and took his hand. "I would never expect you to change yourself for me. You've been honest with me about your past with women. I'm in this with my eyes wide open. So you have nothing to feel sorry about."

He gave me a look of unveiled adoration. "How did I ever get so lucky to be with you? It's like I've won the lottery."

"As long as you're honest with me and I'm the only lottery ticket in your hand, the rest is the past."

He didn't bother to wait for the waitress to bring the check. He threw some cash on the table then grabbed my hand and helped me from my seat.

"Please tell me you don't have anywhere you need to be in the next couple of hours," he whispered in my ear.

I shook my head. "Not that I know of."

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness."

### *****

"Are you a witch?" Brian asked as he held my hand and played with my fingers. "Or maybe a succubus?"

"Sorry, not in this lifetime," I teased.

We were laying on my bed after two hours of mind blowing sex. It was like we were magnets that couldn't keep from touching. And when we were together like this we were so explosive. I reflected back on the scenario with the blond in the diner. The situation had definitely been uncomfortable but the mixture of emotions was fascinating. At first, the woman was excited, then seductive. With a few chilly words Brian had effectively brought her down to the status of a whipped puppy. Okay, I had to admit, it was that part of him that scared me a little. He'd only ever once been cold toward me when the subject of his mom came up, but other than that, he'd shown me nothing but affection, loyalty, passion and tenderness. It was like he had a side of him that was open and free and caring, but another that was reserved and cold and guarded. I'd mostly seen the kind and warm part of him so it was a little shocking to watch him turn on that woman earlier. And then there was the display of regret. I had no doubt it was genuine. I just didn't understand it. Did he think he needed to protect my feelings or shelter me away from the person he used to be? How did I properly convey to him that I didn't judge who he was or that I loved him for who he is? I guess it would be hard for him to know any of that since I hadn't gotten up the courage to tell him I love him. What was I waiting for? I thought about that for several minutes until I came up with an answer. I was waiting for him. Some part of me needed him to make that declaration before I could surrender to it myself. If he could bring himself to love me then I would have no trouble announcing to the world that I was in love with him. At this point, I was ecstatic that he had expressed his desire for an exclusive relationship. I appreciated how different and scary that kind of transition would be for him. After all, he'd never experienced any kind of loving or caring relationship outside a brotherly love with Hunter. I suspected that he'd never had a truly loving woman in his life.

Brian tilted my chin up. "Where did you go just now?"

"Just thinking about lots of things I guess," I replied.

The front door opened and closed. "Shiloh!" Melanie called out.

"I'll be out in a minute," I returned.

We quickly got dressed and joined Melanie in the living room. Her eyebrows lifted and she sported a grin when she saw us.

"A little afternoon delight, huh?" she said suggestively.

Brian shook his head and walked to the front door. He leaned down and kissed me.

"I need to get going," he said. "So I'll see you tonight?"

I nodded. He left and I turned to face Melanie preparing for the inquisition.

Melanie sat on the couch. "So, you guys are getting pretty serious I take it?"

"I don't know. He said he wants us to be exclusive. Is that serious?" I had to force myself not to grin.

Melanie practically squealed as she clapped her hands. "Yes! I'd say that's pretty serious! Hunter said Brian spends all his free time with you and he doesn't even give a second glance to the women at the bar anymore.."

"I think I'm in love with him," I confessed. It felt good to say it out loud.

Melanie smiled. "Have you told him yet?"

"No. I don't want to scare him away. It's hard for Brian to make emotional connections so I think it's best to take it slow," I explained.

"Well, Hunter seems to think Brian is in love with you," she said. "And, he should know. He knows Brian better than anyone."

I gave her a suspicious look. "Since when are you so chummy with Hunter?"

I saw the guilt flash across her face. "I go to the bar sometimes when you and Brian go out."

She was holding back. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Okay. But you have to promise not to tell anyone."

"Melanie I'm your best friend. Give me a break."

She nodded. "You're right. Well, Hunter and I have been sort of seeing each other for the past couple of weeks."

I put a hand over my mouth. "You and Hunter?"

"Yeah. We have a lot of fun together. He's teaching me how to surf."

"I bet that's not all he's teaching you," I joked.

Melanie laughed. "Maybe I'm teaching him a few things, too. If you know what I mean."

I waved my hands in front of me. "Ugh! TMI. I don't need hear the details of my brother's sex life. So why keep things secret?"

"Well, right now we're just having fun, ya know? Neither of us is ready to get serious, so there's really no reason to make this a public display or anything," she explained.

The more I thought about it the more it made sense. Melanie and Hunter would actually make a great couple. Their personalities were so much alike. They were both outgoing and flirty. And they both loved to party.

"I hope things work out for you two," I said.

"We're definitely compatible in the bedroom. I wanted to slap Brian the other night when he called Hunter at five in the morning," she said. "We were just about to..."

"Wait. What?" I must have heard her wrong. "Brian called Hunter? When?"

She thought about it for a minute. "Umm, I guess it would have been Sunday morning."

"Why did Brian call Hunter Sunday morning?"

"I don't know exactly. Hunter just said something about going over to the hospital to meet Brian. He was out the door in like five seconds flat."

What was Brian doing at the hospital? He said he was taking a friend home.

"Shiloh? Is everything okay?" Melanie asked.

"Yeah. Yeah." I made my voice light. "Everything is fine." I stood and walked toward the hall. "I'm going to take a shower. You're coming with me tonight, right?"

"Hell yes! We don't have much time before school starts and I plan to be drunk until then!"

I laughed. Knowing Melanie, she would probably hold true to her word.

I stepped into the shower and my mind kept playing over what Melanie said about Brian. Why was he at the hospital? Did his friend get hurt? But, then why would he need Hunter there? It didn't make sense. I knew one thing. Brian lied to me. And I wanted to know why.

### Chapter 15

Brian

The bar was busy for a Monday night. The college students were coming back to town so for the next week or so there would be bigger crowds on week nights until classes started. Maureen was working the floor while Hunter and I stayed behind the bar. There were two empty stools at my end of the bar. I had them reserved for Shiloh and Melanie. As if just the thought of her could make her appear, the door opened and in walked Shiloh with Melanie behind her. They pushed their way through a group of guys. One of them put his hand on Shiloh's shoulder and leaned down to say something in her ear. It took me three seconds to get to them. I yanked the guy's hand off her and he whirled around, his stance ready for conflict. He looked up at me – he was at least four inches shorter then me – and his expression changed. He put his hands up in surrender.

"Hey Brian. What's the problem man?"

I looked closer at him. He seemed vaguely familiar. I think his name was Mike.

"Nobody puts a hand on my girlfriend," I warned as I pulled her behind me.

"Whoa, no problem buddy. I had no idea she was with you." He laughed nervously. "I guess a lot has happened since I left."

A bigger guy stepped up beside Mike. "Is there a problem, Mike?"

Mike waved him off. "Nah, Trent. This is Brian. He's a bartender here. He's cool."

Trent tipped up his chin. "What's up Brian? Nice ink, man."

"Oh yeah!," Mike stepped in. "Brian does some awesome work. Trent you should go by his shop some time."

Trent looked me over. I could tell he was sizing me up. He definitely wasn't one of the preppy college types. After a full minute he took a step back relaxing.

"You draw those?" he asked.

"Yeah, most of them."

He seemed impressed, not that I cared.

"Nice work. I might come by and check out what you've got," Trent said.

Shiloh pulled on my arm. "Come on, Brian. I need a beer."

Her voice never failed to make me calm. I put my arm over her shoulders. "See you guys later." We turned and headed to the bar. I heard Melanie say something involving the word caveman behind me and I chuckled.

When Shiloh and Melanie took their seats I kissed Shiloh and returned behind the bar. I got them their usual drinks and set them down on the bar. Shiloh seemed off. She wasn't her usual cheerful self.

"Baby, are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah," she replied shortly.

What the hell? Was she mad at me? What could I have possibly done between this afternoon and now?

"Is something wrong?" I wasn't sure I wanted to hear the answer.

She pointed to some people waiting at the bar. "You have customers. We can talk later."

Fuck! Now I was going to go crazy wondering what was going on for the rest of the night. I stayed pretty busy until close to one in the morning. I was helping Maureen clear some tables when a hand rubbed over my ass. My smile dropped when I turned expecting to see Shiloh but finding the pixie chick standing behind me instead. She pushed her body up against me.

"Want to have some fun after you get off work?" she whispered to me.

Her hand started rubbing my crotch. I grabbed her wrist hard and yanked her away. I glanced up and saw Shiloh staring at me. I looked back at pixie.

"Don't you ever fucking touch me again, you crazy bitch." I glared at her but she just laughed.

Her other hand came up over my shoulder. "Ooooh, you know I like it rough."

The next thing I know Shiloh and Melanie are standing behind pixie.

"I don't think you understand," Shiloh said in a hard voice I had never heard her use before.

Pixie turned around. "Excuse me?"

Shiloh's chin tilted up a notch and Melanie crossed her arms over her chest. "He said not to fucking touch him."

Pixie put a hand on her hip defiantly. "Who the fuck do you think you are, bitch?"

I went and stood behind Shiloh putting an arm around her. She looked like she was about to start swinging. "She's my girlfriend."

Maureen came up behind pixie and grabbed her by the arm. "Out you go slut. And don't come back." She walked her to the door and shoved her out into the parking lot.

I turned Shiloh to face me. "Baby, I'm sorry."

She gave me a cold look. "I'm going home. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

She turned and walked out leaving Melanie and I staring after her.

"What the hell was that all about?" I asked.

Melanie shrugged. "I don't know. She's been in a mood all night. Maybe she's hormonal or something."

### *****

When the bar closed Hunter, Melanie and I sat around having drinks. After the way the night had gone I needed to get fucked up. By four in the morning we were good and liquored up. The more I thought about the way Shiloh had acted the more frustrated I got. All the stuff she spouted about not judging me yet she walked out all pissed off because of the pixie skank. I didn't even do anything wrong. When she touched my cock it repulsed me. I looked up at Hunter. Melanie was leaning against him with her eyes closed.

"You should go talk to her," Hunter suggested.

I ran my hand through my hair. "Yeah. You're probably right. You'll take care of Melanie?"

Hunter nodded. "She can crash at our place."

I was pretty sure Hunter and Melanie were sleeping together, but it wasn't any of my business so I didn't ask him about it. Dating Shiloh had changed a lot of things. Before her, I would've given Hunter shit for sleeping with the same girl more than once. Now I couldn't imagine sleeping with anyone but Shiloh. I needed to fix whatever was going on between us tonight. I downed the last of my drink and stood.

"See ya later," I said to Hunter.

"Later."

I was grateful that the drive over to Shiloh's was fairly short. Once on the road I realized I probably shouldn't be. I pulled up to her apartment and took off my helmet. I noticed my stride was a little wobbly as I walked up to the door. The knocking sounded loud to my ears in the quiet of the night. I waited until I heard the sound of the lock. Shiloh stood in the doorway wearing a tank top and panties. Her face held a scowl and her eyes were red. There were pink blotches around her eyes. I gasped. She'd been crying.

I stepped forward reaching out to her. "Shiloh, what's wrong?"

She stepped back. "Brian it's after four in the morning. What are you doing here?"

Her voice cracked sending a sucker punch to my heart. "I needed to see you. Please talk to me. What did I do?"

She closed her eyes and sighed heavily then moved aside so I could step inside. We stood in the living room staring at each other. Her eyes narrowed on me.

"You lied to me," she stated firmly.

In my impaired state I was bewildered. "What are you talking about?"

"On Sunday you told me you were going to take a drunk friend home. You lied."

Oh fuck! I'd fallen asleep before I could tell her the truth. "Listen, it's not what you think..."

"Don't presume to know what I think," she interrupted.

I didn't like the tone of her voice. It reminded me too much of the way I spoke to the woman at the diner. I ran my hand through my hair.

"Baby, I swear I meant to tell you the truth as soon as I got back but I fell asleep and forgot."

"You wouldn't let me go with you yet you called Hunter to meet you at the hospital. Why?"

I sighed. I had to at least give her part of the truth. "The call wasn't from a friend. It was the police. My mom was taken to the hospital after an accident."

Her expression instantly changed from angry to concern. She stepped forward putting her hands on my stomach.

"Oh my god! Is she okay? What happened?" Just like that she believed me and wanted to be there for me. The pity in her eyes made me sick. I didn't want her pity. I didn't deserve her pity.

Struggling to keep my voice neutral I moved away from her. "It's nothing. It'll be fine."

She looked hurt and I kicked myself. It wasn't her fault and she didn't deserve my anger. She was just being her usual caring self. I had to get it together.

I pulled her into my arms. "I'm sorry I lied to you. I just didn't want you to have to deal with it. I promise I was going to tell you but I was so exhausted."

Her arms went around my waist. "Are you okay?"

"Everything is fine," I lied again.

"What about your mom? Is she okay?"

"She's fine. I don't want you to worry okay?"

She tilted her head up to look at me. "You know you can talk to me about anything, right?"

Not everything. "I know. Listen, I'm tired. I should probably just go."

She frowned. "Will you stay? You really shouldn't be driving anyway."

How could I refuse her? "Yeah. Okay."

Lying with Shiloh wrapped in my arms I could pretend that I was fine. I could be someone else. That was the first night the nightmares returned.

### *****

I opened the cabinets looking for something to eat. My stomach growled noisily. I hadn't eaten in over twenty-four hours. The cabinets were empty. My mom was passed out in her room. I heard a noise and turned to see a man standing in the doorway watching me. Something in his glassy eyes was scary. He was naked and one hand was stroking himself. In the other hand he held a twenty dollar bill.

" _You hungry boy?" he asked in a gravely voice._

I nodded, too afraid to speak.

" _You want this money?"_

I did, but I couldn't answer him. Something about him made my insides twist.

" _Come here, boy." His tone made it clear I didn't have an option. I walked over to him._

He held out the money. "I'll give you this money on one condition. Take your pants off."

I tried to shake my head but he grabbed me by my neck. He leaned close and I could smell the stench of liquor and cigarettes on his breath.

" _If you make me take them off you don't get the money, kid. But, either way they're coming off. You got it?"_

I nodded and he let go of my neck.

" _Good. Now let's see what you've got."_

I unfastened my pants and let them drop to my ankles.

" _The underwear, too."_

I pulled down my underwear.

The man leered at me exposing a gap where a tooth should have been. His hand pumped harder. He reached down and wrapped his fingers around my limp penis.

### *****

"Noooooo!" My body jerked upright. I was gasping for breath. Sweat poured down my back.

"Brian?" Shiloh's voice was small and laced with fear.

I jumped out of bed, threw my clothes on and left. I couldn't face her. I jumped on my bike and headed for the one place I could always count on to take away the nightmares.

I lay on a dirty couch. I'm not sure how long I was out. I remembered showing up at the shitty little house. Gary, my old drug dealer said he had some shit that would fuck me into next year. I remember the euphoria but after that everything was a blur. There was a lot of loud music and I'm pretty sure I polished off an entire bottle of tequila. My head was pounding. I stood and the room spun. When I could finally open my eyes again I walked out the door. The bright sun made my skull crack. I took a few steps then leaned over a bush and violently spewed the contents of my stomach. I got up and made it to my bike. By the time I got back to my apartment I could barely make it up the steps. Once in my room I fell onto the bed.

I heard pounding in the distance. As my mind slowly drifted from unconsciousness the pounding got louder until it was reverberating through my head.

"Brian! Open the fucking door!" Hunter was shouting.

"Go away," I called back to him.

He pounded on the door again. "Open the door or I'm going to!"

"I'm trying to sleep!" I yelled.

I heard a crashing sound. Then my body was being lifted up by the front of my shirt.

"What the fuck?" I heard Hunter say.

I was too tired to put up a fight. "I just need some sleep."

He dropped me back on the bed. "Where the hell have you been?"

I yawned. "Gary's."

"Brian, what have you done?" There was real concern in his voice.

I peeled my eyes open slowly. Hunter looked at me with a combination of worry and anger.

"What's the big deal?" I asked. "I just went over to party."

His eyes widened. "What's the big deal!? The big deal motherfucker is that you've been gone for three days and no one knew where you were! I was this close to calling the cops!"

I struggled to sit up. "What...? Three days? How is that possible? I just went over there yesterday morning."

Hunter glared at me. "No. You didn't. You freaked out and bailed on my sister Tuesday morning. It's Friday. Shiloh's been going nuts worrying about you. We've been calling you."

I reached in my pocket and pulled out my phone. It was dead. I leaned over and plugged it into the charger by the bed then turned it on. As soon as it booted up I was barraged with tones. There were shit loads of missed calls from Shiloh and Hunter and another number I didn't recognize. I listened to the voicemail left from that number.

"Mr. Curtis, this is Dr. Montgomery. There have been some changes in your mother's condition and we need you to come in as soon as possible..."

I didn't listen to the rest.

I must have had a crazy expression on my face because Hunter asked, "What?"

"I have to get to the hospital."

I dug into my other pocket and pulled out a baggie of coke. Taking a few snorts I could feel my energy returning.

"I'm not letting you drive," Hunter declared. "I'll take you over there. After you take a shower. You smell like shit."

Hunter left my room and I went in the bathroom. One look in the mirror explained why Hunter was so worried. I looked like death warmed over. My face was pale with dark circles under my eyes. I was wearing the same clothes I had put on Monday before work. I didn't even want to take a guess at what was caked on my jeans. I stripped down and got in the shower turning the water as hot as I could stand.

Twenty minutes later I was feeling somewhat human again aside from the nagging throb in my head. Hunter and I were on our way to the hospital.

"You should call Shiloh and let her know you're alive," he said.

"I need to deal with this first." I didn't know how to deal with Shiloh.

Hunter glanced at me. "Well, I'm going to at least text her and let her know. You can deal with the rest later."

I nodded. When we got to the hospital Hunter sent a message to Shiloh. At this point she probably hated me for running out on her and would break up with me as soon as she could. I wasn't sure how I would handle that. Besides Hunter she was the one good thing in my life. After almost seven years of friendship I knew Hunter wouldn't give up on me, but Shiloh and I had only been together for a few months.

We reached the ICU and gave the nurse our information. She picked up the phone and made a call.

"I've paged the doctor," she said. "You can wait in your mother's room for him."

The bruises on my mother's body had faded and some of the swelling was gone. She still had all the tubes running into her body. I sat down in one of the chairs by the bed putting my face in my hands. A feeling of dread seeped into my gut.

"Mr. Curtis?"

I looked up and a man with salt and pepper hair wearing a long white lab coat stood in the doorway.

"I'm Brian Curtis," I said as I stood up.

He extended his hand and I shook it. "I'm doctor Montgomery, your mother's neurologist."

"I'm sorry I didn't get back to you sooner. I had an emergency."

"Mr. Curtis, I'm afraid I have some bad news," he began. "We've done several scans of your mother's brain and they've all come back with the same conclusion. Your mother is in a persistent vegetative state."

"What does that mean?" I asked.

He cleared his throat. "It means that she has no functioning brain activity. The trauma to her skull caused damage to the lower part of her brain. That's the area that controls the body's most basic functions such as breathing. Given this situation she would have to remain on life support for the remainder of her life."

"There's nothing that can be done?" Everything started to get surreal and I was pretty sure it had nothing to do with the drugs.

He shook his head. "I'm sorry, Mr. Curtis. The damage is too extensive. I assume your mother didn't have a living will?"

I almost laughed. "No."

"In that case, seeing as you are her only living relative the decision will be up to you."

I felt like a scared little boy. I knew what the good doctor was saying. I had to decide whether or not to pull the plug. How was this even happening? The cold ice started slithering through my veins. How was I supposed to be okay with killing my own mother?

"Dr. Montgomery," Hunter spoke up. "Can we have a few days to think about all of this?"

He nodded. "Of course. I know this is a difficult decision. Take a little time. As soon as you're ready let us know."

He left the room. I stared down at my mother. At one time I imagined she was a beautiful woman with hopes and dreams. All of those had been wiped away when she was left destitute with a baby to take care of and no financial means. If I hadn't come along she might have had some kind of life worth living. Maybe she would have gone to college and become someone successful. Maybe she would have married and had a family and been happy. But that wasn't how things turned out. She'd gotten pregnant at a young age then been abandoned with no support in a world where there were no advantages. There wasn't a rich father to bail her out or a compassionate aunt to take her in. The walls were closing in on me. I was suffocating.

"I need to go home," I said.

Hunter nodded. "Let's go."

The minute we got back into the apartment I grabbed my keys and headed straight back out the door. It didn't matter that I felt like I had been on the losing end of a brawl. I needed to find just a sliver of peace even if for one moment. I didn't have a plan but after driving listlessly I found myself in front of Shiloh's apartment. She was like a homing signal. I got out of the car and walked up to her door. My arm felt heavy as if it were filled with lead as I reached up and knocked on the door. Her car was out front so I knew she was home.

Melanie opened the door. The look on her face was less than welcoming.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded.

I swallowed hard. "I need to see Shiloh."

"Oh? You need to see her? Do you know what she has been going through the past few days? What about what she needs?"

"Melanie," I could feel my anxiety cranking up. "Please. I just need to talk to her."

"Let him in." I felt the soothing balm of Shiloh's voice from behind her friend.

I stepped inside and Melanie slammed the door before stomping back down the hallway.

"You let me in," I muttered.

"You can thank Hunter for that. He told me I should hear you out."

Once again Hunter stood by me. I owed him more than I ever knew how to repay.

I took a long look at Shiloh. She looked tired as though she hadn't slept in days. That was my fault. I had put her through hell. And, here I was, as selfish as I'd ever been needing her comfort. I'd never felt like such a dick in my life. I had to be near her. She was becoming like air for me. I walked up to her. Every emotion in me culminated in that moment in an overwhelming tidal wave. My eyes burned. I did the only thing I was physically capable of: I dropped to my knees in front of her, bent over, buried my face in my hands and sobbed.

The last time I remember crying I was eight years old. I lay on the couch in the dark. It was the night that I took twenty dollars for letting that sick fuck touch me. Every time after that I buried my feelings deep inside. For five years I did what I had to do to survive.

### Chapter 16

Shiloh

Brian stepped into the apartment. Something was very wrong. He looked sick. He was pale and his eyes lacked the depth I was used to seeing. The confidence he normally carried was gone as he stood with his shoulders slumped. I didn't know whether to be relieved he was alive or furious that he let me worry about him for days. I did know one thing for certain. If he had come here to try and make things right I wouldn't accept anything but complete transparency. He was going to have to open up to me or I would have to let him go.

He moved like a zombie toward me. I didn't know what to expect so I braced my heart for the worst. Then he dropped to his knees at my feet and completely lost it. For a minute I didn't know how to react. Seeing Brian falling apart was such a shock that I could only stare down at him. His shoulders shook violently and my heart wrenched in my chest. I kneeled beside him and placed my hands under his arms. I pulled him up.

"Come on," I whispered.

He got to his feet and I led him into my room guiding him to the bed. This was a man who went to great lengths to hide his emotions yet he was sobbing in front of me like a child. I held firm to my resolve that he would need to tell me everything, but at that moment he was so beyond vulnerable that I couldn't bring myself to question him. I pulled off his shoes and lifted his legs onto the bed. He kept his face hidden behind his hands as he curled up on his side. I crawled into the bed next to him and pulled his hands away from his face. His eyes were squeezed shut and tears streamed down. I wrapped myself around him until his head was lying on my chest. His arms came around me and it felt like he was holding on for dear life.

I don't know how long he cried. It felt like hours. As his sobs began to subside his body gave sporadic shudders with ragged breathing. My shirt was soaked with his tears making my eyes water and my throat tighten. I didn't want to say anything. I just wanted to hold him and let him know I was there for him. All the anger drifted away. We could deal with that later.

Hunter called me before Brian showed up. He said that Brian was on the edge and had taken off. He suspected that Brian would show up at my place. I was pissed. I told Hunter that I was nobody's doormat. Hunter agreed, but then he told me some things that made me sit down and think. He told me that Brian was going through something that he thought was bigger than he knew how to handle. He was extremely worried about Brian's state of mind. He wouldn't divulge what Brian had been doing for the past several days. He simply asked me not to give up on Brian. He said that if anyone could reach Brian it was me.

Brian's breathing began to even out. His grip on me didn't loosen but I was pretty sure he had fallen asleep. I dozed off as the light faded from the day. At some point in the night Brian's hold on me had become slack and I crawled out of bed to use the bathroom. When I came back into the bedroom I turned on a small lamp. I sat on the chair across from the bed and watched him as he slept. Every so often his eyelids would twitch. I nearly jumped out of my skin when he started screaming.

"Noooooooo! Stop! Stop! Stop!"

I raced over to the bed and stroked his hair while whispering to him. "It's okay. It's okay. I'm here. You're safe."

What kind of demons were chasing him? Whatever it was it had to be terrible. I stayed up throughout the night. With each nightmare I held him and tried to comfort him. At some point exhaustion took over and I fell asleep with him in my arms.

### *****

Brian slept for twenty-four hours straight. It was close to seven in the evening on Saturday when he finally woke up. I was sitting in the chair watching him when he rolled over and his eyes opened. He looked less like a zombie but wasn't quite back to normal. His face was still pale and gaunt. His eyes were full of sorrow.

I gave him a little smile. "Hi there, sleepyhead."

"Shiloh..." He reached his arm out to me.

"We can talk later. Let me get you something to eat."

I hurried from the room into the kitchen. I toasted a bagel and smothered it in cream cheese and poured a glass of orange juice. I brought the bagel and juice to him. When I walked into my room Brian was sitting up in my bed with his back leaning against the wall. He stared at nothing. He looked haunted. I got his attention and handed him the plate and glass. He ate the bagel quickly washing it down with the juice. I took the dishes back to the kitchen.

"Hunter dropped off some clothes for you." I pointed to a duffel bag on the floor. "Why don't you take a shower?"

He glanced at the bag then back at me. "Shiloh. I, I don't know how..."

"I said we will talk later," I repeated firmly. "Now go shower and get dressed."

Surprisingly he did what I told him to. When he came into the living room where I was seated on the couch he looked much more like himself. He sat in the chair across from me.

He seemed to struggle with something then he looked up at me. "I know I hurt you. And I'm very sorry for that. I just want you to know how much I appreciate you not turning me away yesterday. You had every right to."

I didn't know what to say. I was still wrestling with all the emotions in my head. I needed something more from him. I needed him to let me in. He stood and looked at me with question in his eyes. He picked up his bag and turned toward the door.

"Why do you run from me?" I asked.

He stopped and dropped his head sighing. "You scare the shit out of me. You're so perfect and you make things feel better. But, I know I don't deserve it. I know I'm not good enough for you. And the way I feel..." His hand fisted over his heart.

I got up and walked over to him. "How do you feel?"

"What do you want me to say?"

"I want you to tell me how you really feel. About me."

His face hardened. "You want me to tell you I love you? Is that what you want to hear?"

"Is that how you really feel?" My heart was pounding in my chest.

"Fuck Shiloh! Why? Why should I put my heart on the chopping block just to have it ripped out of my chest when you finally realize you could have so much better? What happens in six months or a year when you meet some great guy who has a degree and money and can give you everything? Am I supposed to just be okay with you leaving me for him when you realize he has everything to offer you and I have nothing?"

I could sense his emotions getting out of control so I stepped closer to him and put my hands on his face. "Do you love me, Brian? It's a simple question."

His eyes were full of conflicting emotions, but it wasn't the anger or confusion that caught my attention. It was the fear. It was then that I realized that Brian was afraid of letting himself love and be loved. It was then that I realized that my insistence upon waiting for him to proclaim his love for me was the wrong idea. He wouldn't do it if it meant that those feelings wouldn't be reciprocated. It was then that I realized that he needed to know he was loved before he could be secure enough to put his heart on the line.

"I love you, Brian."

The doubt in his eyes cut me to the core, but I was determined to make him believe me.

"I have never loved a man, but I love you with all my heart. I don't care about where you've come from or whether you have money. I love you. I feel it in me."

He stared down at me as if he couldn't make sense of what I was saying.

"I love you," I repeated. "I love you so much."

It was several minutes before he spoke. "My mother is still in the hospital. She's on life support. I have to decide whether or not to pull the plug."

My eyes widened. I wasn't expecting that.

We sat on the couch facing each other. Brian stared down at our hands while nervously playing with my fingers. I waited patiently not saying a word. His brow furrowed and he took in a deep breath then let it out slowly.

"My father left my mom when I was only a couple months old so I never even knew him. My mom didn't have any family to turn to so she went to work at a sleazy strip club. That's where she met up with some people who got her using drugs. We lived in this shitty one bedroom apartment. By the time I was six I was pretty much taking care of myself. My mom was either high or passed out or fucking some loser for drugs. There was an old Spanish lady who lived a few doors down who would come over sometimes and bring me some food. Sometimes my mom would be gone for days at a time and I wondered if she would ever come back. When she did she always had a little money and she would take us to McDonalds. She would seem okay for a few days then she'd take off again. Most of the time she was strung out. I'm surprised she was able to make the rent." He paused like he was considering whether he could say anymore. "When I was eight years old I was looking through the cabinets for something to eat. I hadn't eaten since the morning before. The cabinets were bare and I was so hungry."

He let my hands go and covered his face. I rubbed my hand over his knee softly. The shame etched into his beautiful face made my eyes water and my throat went tight.

"A man came into the kitchen. He was probably still fucked up on whatever drugs they had been doing all night. My mom was passed out in her room. He stood there naked jerking his cock. I remember feeling scared and sick. He offered me a twenty dollar bill if I would take off my pants. I knew if I didn't do what he wanted he would make me either way. But, he said if I didn't do it then I wouldn't get the money."

He glanced up at me pleading in his eyes. "Shiloh, I didn't know what else to do. I was starving and terrified. The guy was a sick fuck. If I didn't do what he wanted I was afraid of what he'd do to me." He bowed his head again. "So I took off my pants and he touched me while he got off. When he was done he threatened to kill me and my mom if I ever told anyone. I believed him. He and his friends came around every so often for almost five years."

I gasped and put a hand over my mouth. "Oh my god, Brian!" Tears spilled down my cheeks.

His voice hardened. "Well, at least I was able to eat."

Did he think I judged him for what some sick people did to a helpless child? I reached out and took his hand.

"Brian, it wasn't your fault," I whispered.

"I took money in exchange for letting some sick perverts touch me, Shiloh! How is that not my fault?"

"You were a child! You were trying to survive."

He shook his head slowly. "I really have been trying to convince myself of that for a long time. I finally got away from all of it when I met Hunter. I spent most of my time hanging out at his place." He gave a low chuckle. "I remember the first time I went to Hunter's house. I thought I had stepped into a castle or something. His bedroom was the size of my entire apartment. Hunter knew I was poor but he didn't care. He treated me like I was just like him."

I nodded. "Hunter is a good guy."

"When I was old enough I got a job. That made things a lot better. It was Hunter's idea for me to do the tattoo apprenticeship. So, when I turned eighteen I started working with Mark. Hunter and I got an apartment and I put all my money away so I can one day open my own shop."

I crawled over to him and put my hands on his cheeks. "I love you, Brian," I whispered before leaning in and pressing my lips against his.

He placed his hands tentatively on my waist as I deepened the kiss. I needed him to feel that I meant what I said. I sat in his lap and wrapped my legs around his waist. His lips became hungrier and I responded. His arms folded around me pulling me tightly against him. We stayed that way for a long time before he slowly pulled back. He stared into my eyes as if he couldn't believe I was real.

"I'm so sorry for hurting you, Shiloh. I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

I smiled. "You aren't going to lose me. I'm in love with you. I'm not going anywhere."

His lips crashed onto mine his hand weaving behind my neck pulling me as close as possible. The desperation in his kiss lit a fire in my belly scorching down between my legs. I rubbed my hips forward against him and felt how hard he was. He growled low in his throat. Pushing my hips forward again I could feel the pressure of him against me making the heat spread between my thighs. Brian stood up suddenly cupping my ass as I wrapped my legs tighter. He walked into the bedroom and shut the door with his foot. As soon as my back hit the mattress his lips moved down my neck to my collar bone. His hands pushed up my tank top exposing my breasts.

"You are so fucking beautiful," he whispered.

Pulling my shirt over my head his lips landed on one of my nipples and tugged at it. I arched my back and moaned. His fingers rolled my other nipple sending electric currents straight through my body right to my core. I clawed at his shirt until I pulled it over his head and threw it to the floor. The passion between us was so intense that I felt like one touch between my legs and I would lose it. My fingers were all over his skin, his back, his chest down to his waist. I frantically grappled with the button of his jeans quickly releasing it then unzipping his fly. As soon as I had it open I plunged my hand beneath his boxer briefs and wrapped my fingers around his hard length. Brian groaned and his lips returned to mine while he pulled my shorts down. Once they were past my knees I wiggled them the rest of the way and kicked them off.

"I need you now," I gasped.

He adjusted himself between my thighs the head of his cock nestled against my opening. He pushed his hips forward slowly filling me up. He was hot and hard and I wanted every inch of him.

"Oh fuck, baby. You feel so good.," he breathed into my ear.

"Oh god Brain! I want all of it."

He pushed harder and my hips arched up to take him all the way in. His mouth devoured mine and my head was spinning with the sensation of him rubbing back and forth inside me while his tongue swirled with mine. His arms snaked around me and pulled me closer until there was no room between us. His breathing sped up as he increased the rhythm driving deeper and harder into me. The feel of him buried in me was so incredible. The quaking in my core was building up to an enormous eruption that was only moments away. I dug my fingers in his back and he growled.

"Fuck, Shiloh. Oh fuck, baby!" he called out.

Just as I was about to explode I felt him throbbing hard. He pulled his face away and stared intently into my eyes. The emotion in his eyes was raw and completely exposed. There was something powerful mixed with fear.

As the exquisite ecstasy of my body finally reached it's peak Brian looked me directly in the eyes and said, "I love you, Shiloh."

His words sent me over the edge and Brian joined me in the most amazing orgasm I had ever felt. Tears rolled down the side of my face as I clung to him with every ounce of my strength.

When we were finally able to catch our breath Brian leaned up and looked down at me. He stroked my hair softly.

"What's wrong, baby? Did I do something to hurt you?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Did you mean it?"

He smiled and wiped away my tears with his thumbs. "Yeah. I meant it. I love you, Shiloh."

More tears fell from my eyes. "I love you, too." I paused. "Brian?"

"Yeah?"

"Please don't shut me out anymore."

"I promise I'll do my best not to."

I gave a nod. "That's enough for now, I suppose."

He grinned. "That isn't nearly enough," he said as he moved his hips.

I gasped. He was getting hard again already and my body was more than eager for another round.

### Chapter 17

Brian

Banging on Shiloh's bedroom door tore me from my blissful state. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was just after eleven. Shiloh groaned and lifted her head from my chest.

"Come on you guys!" Melanie shouted from the hallway. "Enough make up sex! We have partying to do!"

Shiloh laughed and my heart skipped. I couldn't believe the way this night had gone. Shiloh loved me and I loved her. How could things get any better? I was still terrified of losing her but hearing her tell me she loved me helped ease it a little. I had never told a woman I loved her but saying it to Shiloh wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. It felt right, like she was placed on this planet just for me. I even felt like I could handle the rest of the shit in my life with her by my side.

Melanie knocked on the door again. "If you aren't out here in five seconds I'm coming in!"

Shiloh laughed. "Okay, okay!" She looked at me. "You up for a party?"

"Hell yes!"

I pulled her in for one more delicious kiss then reluctantly let her go. She went into the bathroom and showered while I got dressed. The temptation to join her in the shower was almost too much to resist. But I knew if I did we'd never get out of there. Besides, something about having Shiloh's sexy scent on me turned me on. She came out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel her skin still glistening. I couldn't take my eyes off her. Here was this incredible woman who was intelligent, caring and drop dead gorgeous and she loved me. Even after hearing about my fucked up life she still loved me. I was getting aroused just thinking about her. Well, her sliding a sexy pair of lace panties up her thighs wasn't hurting either. I watched as she put on a matching bra. She went into the closet then reappeared a few minutes later wearing this spaghetti strapped black tank and a pair of short cut off denim shorts. She went into the bathroom and came back with her damp hair pulled back into a sexy French braid. In all her natural beauty she was absolutely the most gorgeous sight I'd ever seen. She glanced over at me.

"What?" she asked.

I licked my lips. "You have no idea how incredible you look. Are you ready to go?"

She slipped her delicate feet into her flip flops. "Yep."

"I need to stop at my place and change clothes. Why don't you follow me over and we'll all go together from there?"

"Sounds good."

Melanie and Shiloh took Shiloh's car over to my apartment. When I walked in the door Hunter gave me a curious look.

"Everything okay?" he asked.

I nodded. "As well as it can be considering."

He followed me to my room. "Considering what?"

"Considering everything with my mom." I flashed him a smile. "Oh, just so you know I'm in love with your sister and amazingly she loves me, too."

Hunter grinned. "Hot damn! You didn't fuck it up!"

I laughed. "Almost. But not yet." I gave him an amused glance. "So, how are things with Melanie?"

His jaw dropped a little. "Umm..."

"Come on, man. I know you've got the hots for her."

He looked a little sheepish. "Yeah, well she's pretty cool. I like hanging out with her."

I smiled. "You guys seem good together."

"Thanks. Since when did you become such a fucking sap?"

I couldn't hold back a grin. "Since your sister came in and turned my world upside down."

I grabbed a pair of shorts and threw them on along with a clean tee shirt. There was a knock at the door and Hunter called out "Come in!"

I grabbed my wallet, keys and phone and we went to the living room. The minute I saw Shiloh I had to touch her. I went over to her and kissed her then took her hand in mine.

"You want to all go together?" I asked Hunter.

"Sounds good. You drive," he answered.

Hunter took Melanie's hand. "Have you ever been to a bonfire beach party?"

She shook her head. "Nope."

Hunter grinned. "You guys are going to love it."

The party was situated on a strip of private beach behind a friend of Paul's house. When we got there the beach was crawling with people. Clusters of people were grouped around a large bonfire. Off to the side there were several pits dug in the sand with metal grates over them and the smell of some kind of meat cooking reminding me that we I hadn't eaten since Shiloh fixed me a bagel hours ago. Tables had been set up and a guy stood behind one making drinks. There were several kegs. Music blared from a sound system and people were dancing nearby.

I leaned to whisper into Shiloh's ear. "The party gets started late so that people can be up for the sunrise." I led her over to the makeshift bar. "What do you want to drink?"

She pondered it for a moment. "I think I'll have a margarita."

I nodded to the bartender and he started making her drink. He handed it to her then turned to me. "What'll you have?"

"Maker's Mark straight up and a beer."

"Make that two," Hunter said behind me.

Melanie ordered a sex on the beach and practically squealed as we walked toward the fire. "Oh my god! Is that who I think it is?" She discreetly pointed toward a guy surrounded by a group of scantily clad women.

Hunter laughed. "Yeah. That's him."

Shiloh looked to where Melanie pointed and her jaw dropped. "That's Lance Worthington."

"Yeah. The lead guitarist for Wrecking Ball," I confirmed.

Hunter tapped me on the shoulder. "You should go introduce them. They'd get a kick out of that."

I took Shiloh's hand and led them over to where Lance stood. When he saw us approach he stepped from the throng of women and put his hand up. I gave him a high five.

"Brian! What's up man?" He greeted.

"Just taking advantage of your open bar," I replied laughing.

"Feel free. You know I love to throw a party." He eyed Shiloh appreciatively. "And who is this lovely creature?"

I put a hand on his chest. "Huh uh. Sorry buddy, she's taken. Lance, this is my girlfriend, Shiloh. Shiloh this is Lance."

"Nice to meet you," she said.

He took her hand and kissed the top of it then raised an eyebrow at me. "Your girlfriend?"

"Yeah," Hunter chimed in. "Brian has officially dropped off the market."

Lance eyed Shiloh again. "Well, I can certainly see why."

I turned toward Melanie. "Lance this is Melanie, Shiloh's friend. They moved here at the beginning of summer."

Lance gave Melanie's hand the same treatment as Shiloh's.

"So, how do you guys know each other?" Shiloh asked.

Lance pulled his shirt up to show off his tattoos. "Brian's the only one I'll let touch my skin with a needle."

"Oh wow," Shiloh said as she looked at Lance's chest. "Those are amazing!"

Lance nodded. "Yep. Brian's gonna be famous one day. Nobody can beat his ink. So, when are you going to venture out on your own?"

"I'm working on it," I replied. "Hunter and I are going to set something up. Hopefully by the end of the year."

Lance nodded. "Well, make sure you let me know. You'll definitely have my business. And you know I'll send people your way." He glanced up distracted by something. A petite woman with short blond hair walked up and Lance put his arm around her and kissed her. "You finally made it."

She smiled. "I needed to take a nap after my long flight," she said.

"Let me introduce you to my friends." Pointing to each of us he made introductions. "Guys this is Maddie. She lives in Atlanta. My brother and her sister just recently got married."

Maddie glanced at the group of girls behind Lance. "Your fan club?" she said sarcastically.

"Baby, you wound me," he said dramatically. "You know I only have eyes for you."

"You should come by soon," I said to Lance.

"Definitely, man. I've taken some time off the road so you'll definitely see me in the shop. Just make sure that punk Greg isn't there."

I laughed. "Give me a call. We'll set something up after hours."

"Have fun guys, enjoy the party." He leaned toward Shiloh and lowered his voice. "It's been a pleasure to meet the woman who has won the heart of my friend. You must be very special. Keep him out of trouble."

Shiloh smiled. "I'll do my best. It's great meeting you. And you too Maddie."

We headed back to the bar for another drink. "I wouldn't have pictured someone as famous as Lance to be so down to earth," Shiloh commented.

I nodded. "Yeah. He can be a little dramatic sometimes, but he's a pretty cool guy."

"What did he mean by you becoming famous?"

I rolled my eyes. "He thinks I should be on one of those shows about tattoo artists that have become so popular lately."

"You really are talented," she said.

I shrugged. I didn't take compliments well.

"Would you be willing to draw a tattoo for me?" she asked.

I raised an eyebrow at her. "What? Are you getting the ink bug now?"

"I think it would be cool to have a Brian Curtis original. Before you get famous and all," she teased.

I kissed her. "I might be able to come up with something."

Melanie came over and grabbed Shiloh by the arm. "I'm kidnapping your woman. I love this song and we need to dance."

Shiloh laughed and gave me an apologetic look. "Sorry. You know she won't let it go unless I go with her."

"Have fun."

I watched her as her body moved with the music. My chest twisted in knots. I was beyond hopeless when it came to that woman. She had me wrapped around her finger and there was no place I'd rather be.

"You really do have it bad, don't you?" Hunter asked as he came up beside me. "Go figure. My nerdy little sister had the power to bring down the womanizing Brian Curtis."

"Nerdy little sister? I fail to see what you're talking about. She's smoking hot."

He laughed. "You should have seen her a couple of years ago."

The tempo of the music slowed and I set my drink down. I made my way over to Shiloh and pulled her into my arms. Our bodies swayed to the rhythm and she wrapped her arms around my neck. The way she looked at me as if I were the only person around made my heart melt a little. I wanted to enjoy this night with her before going back to reality tomorrow. My difficult decision loomed ahead of me like a black hole.

"What are you thinking?" she asked.

"I was thinking that I wish this night could last forever," I replied.

Her fingers ran through my hair sending chills down my spine. She seemed to be able to read me.

"Whatever you decide I'll be there to support you," she said.

I closed my eyes and buried my face in her neck. I submerged myself in her scent and her silky skin.

"Fuck Shiloh, I love you so much."

"I love you, too."

Those words from her lips washed over me like healing rain.

After several more drinks the music was interrupted by Lance. He held a microphone to his lips and made an announcement.

"Listen up everybody! Me and the guys are going to play a little number for you." Cheers erupted through the crowd. "On one condition. My friend Brian here has to join in."

Oh hell no!

Lance continued on. "Since our lead singer couldn't make it tonight we're going to need Brian to fill in." He saw me shaking my head. "Folks, I think he's going to need a little encouragement. Bartender."

Another shot appeared in front of me while the crowd chanted my name.

"You should do it!" Shiloh said excitedly.

Once again I couldn't say no to her. I poured the shot down and chased it with the last of my beer. I leaned down and kissed Shiloh.

"You owe me big time," I said in her ear.

She grinned. "No problem."

I walked over to Lance and he held out a guitar. There was a platform set up for the band and I stepped behind the microphone.

"Alright, what are we playing?" I asked Lance.

"How about a little number for Shiloh," he replied grinning.

I knew the song he meant and I wanted to strangle him for putting me on the spot. I fidgeted with the strings until I got the right sound. Finding my courage I spoke into the microphone.

"This one is for Shiloh."

She smiled at me and I started strumming the guitar. The opening notes of Tesla's Love Song filled the air. Lance accompanied me in perfect harmony. After the long intro I started singing. My eyes never left Shiloh's face. When we got to the solo I let Lance take over. We sang the last verses together and by the time the song was over I could see a trail of tears down Shiloh's cheeks. After the last note, the crowd cheered and we took a bow.

"Thanks man," Lance said as he took the guitar from me.

Shiloh wandered over. "That was really great!"

Lance smiled and went back to play. The crowd went wild as he launched into one of the band's heavier numbers. Shiloh and I went back to the bar and got some drinks.

"You want to take a walk?" I suggested.

"Yeah. That would be nice."

I put my arm around her shoulder and we walked away from the party. The night air was mild with a light breeze.

"Why didn't you tell me you could sing, too?" Shiloh's words were a little slurred from the margaritas.

"I don't know. I guess I just didn't think about it."

She stopped and faced me. "It's so unfair. You're an amazing artist and you have such great musical talent. Where did you learn it?"

"I guess it's like my drawing. I just listened to a lot of music and my mom had a guitar so I would play around with it. There isn't much to do when you're a kid left alone a lot."

"Have you ever thought about being in a band?"

"Nah. I like to play, but my art is what matters most to me."

We continued walking. "What about you?" I asked. "You said you played guitar. Why don't you play anymore?"

She stopped and stared out at the ocean. In the moonlight I could see was far away in her thoughts.

"I haven't played since my mother died," she whispered.

I stood behind her and put my arms around her. "Would you be willing to play for me?"

She sighed. "I don't know. Maybe. It's hard, ya know? When my mom was sick I used to play for her. The last song I played was at her funeral. I haven't been able to pick up the guitar since. Well, except for your birthday."

"I'm sorry about your mom, Shiloh. It sounds like you two were really close."

We had traveled into new territory. Neither of us had spoken much about our mothers but for very different reasons.

"My mom was so heart broken after the divorce," she said. "I love Hunter to death, but our father is a piece of shit."

I couldn't argue. I'd met Hunter's father. He showed so little interest in his son. He was away most of the time leaving Hunter to his own devices. Every so often he came into town yet he never made contact with Hunter. To my knowledge, Hunter's father had never remarried.

"Has he ever tried to contact you?" I asked.

She shook her head. "No. When my mom moved us out east it was like he dropped off the face of the planet. Not that he was there much before that. I think that's why Hunter and I are so close. We were all we had really. My mom tried to get close to Hunter, but that didn't work out very well. She even wanted to take Hunter with us, but my dad refused and threatened to leave her penniless. She didn't really have a choice since Hunter wasn't her son."

"Damn. He really is a dick," I said.

Her mood lightened a little. "But after my mom and I moved, things got a lot better. She and I became really close. The divorce settlement left her very well off but she bought us this nice little house. We didn't really live like we had before. When she got sick I was a sophomore in college. I took a semester off to help take care of her. When she died I sold our house and it wasn't long after that Melanie and I decided to move away from there."

"I guess it would be like if something happened to Hunter. He's really the only person I consider family," I explained.

She gave me a contemplative look. "I am sorry about your mom. I know you said you weren't really close, but she's still your mom, so I imagine this is a very difficult situation."

I fought the urge to shut down. I had made a promise to Shiloh that I would try to open up to her. "Yeah. She may not have been a great mom, but she didn't deserve what happened to her."

"She was in an accident, right?"

"It wasn't really an accident," I admitted. I sighed heavily. "She was badly beaten then thrown from a moving car."

Shiloh gasped. "Oh my god!"

"The thing is, I always expected to get a call saying my mom was in jail or dead. But, when it actually came I was surprised by how hard it was." I closed my eyes. "And seeing her like that." My fists clenched. "Who does something like that? If I could have one minute alone with the motherfucker who did that to her..."

"I'm so sorry, Brian," she whispered.

We walked back to the party. There were couples laid out on blankets. The music was playing and some people were still dancing. I spotted Hunter and Melanie sitting on a blanket with their tongues down each other's throats. I chuckled and pointed them out to Shiloh. She smiled and pulled me toward them.

"Ahem," Shiloh cleared her throat. "If you two could come up for air for a second."

Hunter and Melanie scooted away from each other quickly.

"Oh please," Shiloh rolled her eyes. "We just wanted to share your blanket. Scoot over, Hunter." He had nowhere to go but closer to Melanie.

"Well played," I whispered into Shiloh's ear.

She giggled. God damn! Her pretty laugh had me all kinds of fucked up. We sat down and I pulled Shiloh into my arms with her back pressed against my stomach. She leaned her head back against my chest and I felt that sense that everything was perfect with her in my arms. Hunter and Melanie gave up the bullshit and took a similar position next to us. The sky was starting to get lighter.

"Brian?" Shiloh looked up at me with glassy eyes.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sleepy."

I smiled and pulled her close. "You can sleep. I've got you."

She curled into me and rested her head against my chest. When the sun started to rise behind us I lifted Shiloh up in my arms.

"You ready to go?" I asked Hunter.

Melanie lay draped across his lap. "Yeah."

We got back to our apartment and carried the girls up. I lay Shiloh down in my bed. She looked so beautiful and peaceful. I pulled off her shorts and bra. As sexy as she was I just wanted her to be comfortable. After I stripped off my clothes I got into the bed and wrapped myself around her. Whatever lay ahead in the next few days I knew I would be able to survive it because I had the most wonderful woman and my best friend by my side. I clung to that thought as I drifted off to sleep.

### Chapter 18

Brian

I stared at the ceiling while Shiloh slept. I could feel her breath softly fanning my chest each time she exhaled. I had been awake for close to an hour thinking about my mom. I realized that I didn't even really know her at all. Whenever she was around she was either high or drunk or both. I hadn't seen her in a couple of years. The last time was when Hunter and I had gone to her apartment after she called me frantic and sobbing telling me she was in trouble and needed my help. When we arrived we could hear her before we opened the door. I burst into the apartment with Hunter hot on my heels. We found her in her room with some guy standing over her his fist drawn back. My mom was crouched in the corner looking like she'd already been on the receiving end of the guy's fist a few times. Hunter and I sprung into action taking the man down. It was probably a little excessive but we just kept beating on him. He wasn't moving and I gave him one final kick to his side hearing the crack of his ribs against my boot. We dragged his limp, broken body out and left him lying in an alley next to a dumpster.

Returning to the apartment my mother went ballistic. She kept screaming at me saying that I had just cost her, her fix. She begged me for money and when I refused she told me I was a mistake and ruined her life. We left the apartment and I'd never looked back. She called on occasion but I always let it go to voicemail. She left desperate messages begging for money. About a year ago the calls eventually stopped.

"Mmmm..." Shiloh's hand slid slowly over my stomach as she curled closer into me.

Just that slight movement was more than enough to jar me back to the present. Blood rushed directly to my cock. Shiloh's effect on me was always instant and powerful. She was the polar opposite of most women I'd been with. My breathing hitched as her hand traveled lower. She stroked me softly and I throbbed painfully beneath her fingers. Her eyes were still closed but her lips formed a pretty little smile. Oh fuck me! Then she did something totally unexpected. She twisted her body over me, opened her eyes and looked at me like a vixen while she moved her panties to the side and slid down my shaft. I nearly came right then. I leaned my head back and groaned from the excruciatingly wonderful feeling of her wet heat wrapped tightly around me. With agonizing gradualness she slid up then eased back down taking me deep inside her. She watched me intently as she tortured my cock. My hands rested on her ass as my hips arched up to meet her with every thrust. It was the most sensual thing I'd ever witnessed setting off something primal and urgent within me.

I quickly pulled her off me and flipped her over onto her stomach. I yanked at her lacy panties tearing them off her. I cupped her tight little ass cheeks in my hands before pulling her up until she was on her hands and knees. Her pretty pink lips were moist and inviting. I eased my cock inside her luscious pussy until I could feel her ass against my hips. The head of my cock met resistance and I knew I was as deep as I could go. I wrapped my arm around her waist letting my fingers slide down to that taught little nub between her legs. Rubbing gently in circles I pulled back shoved my cock in again. The feel of her slick velvety walls made my eyes roll back.

"Harder, faster," she gasped.

Her voice was like a trigger. I lost all control and slammed into her over and over again. My finger rubbed her clit faster as she pushed back against each of my hard thrusts taking me so fucking deep and hard.

"Brian! Oh god, Brian!" she was practically screaming my name as I pounded into her.

Her muscles clenched tightly around me milking my cock and I swore I saw stars as I came deep inside her.

"Oh fuck! Oh fuck! Oh fuck!" I heard myself calling out.

We collapsed and I could still feel our twitching in the aftermath of the most incredible orgasm I had ever experienced. How was it possible that every time it got better and better? I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her neck over and over.

"Fuck baby you feel so good," I whispered against her neck. "I just can't get enough of you, baby. Mmmmmm...I love you so much."

She turned in my arms and looked up at me. "I love you, too."

Her face was so sweet with her sleepy eyes and flushed cheeks. I instantly felt like some kind of domineering asshole. I had just taken her from behind without even thinking.

"Baby I'm so sorry. I didn't want to make you feel degraded. You were so sexy and the way you were looking at me I just went crazy."

She ran her fingers over my cheek. "I don't feel degraded, Brian. In case you didn't notice I got off just as hard as you did. Just to be clear, I'm not some fragile little innocent doll. I'll admit I've never done it like that but it was really hot."

"Did I hurt you?" I asked.

"It hurt a little but it was kind of a good hurt. Does that make sense?"

"I think so." I sighed. "I just don't ever want to hurt you or do something that makes you feel uncomfortable."

"I don't think I'm ready to experiment with handcuffs and whips, but doggy style is definitely acceptable." She laughed.

"Mmmm...just hearing you talk about handcuffs and whips makes me hard," I teased. Okay I wasn't exactly teasing. It did make me hard. "Not that I would ever risk your beautiful skin by whipping you, but I might be open to you tying me up."

She gave me a devilish grin. "Be careful what you wish for, Brian. You just might get it."

She pushed me onto my back and straddled me pushing her hips down until I was inside her again. She rode me hard and fast until I was out of my mind with pleasure begging her for more. When I felt her spasms gripping my cock I pulled her mouth to mine and kissed her deeply as she once again brought me to another mind blowing climax.

"Fuck, baby. You're going to kill me, I swear," I breathed onto her lips.

She laughed and kissed me tenderly.

Hello. I'm Brian Curtis and I am addicted to Shiloh Stone.

### *****

We stood in the hospital parking lot. I stared up at the tall building. My gut was clenching. I had already spoken with Dr. Montgomery and informed him of my decision. Shiloh took my hand while Hunter stood on the other side of me.

"Whenever you're ready. Take your time," Hunter said.

Our moods were solemn and I felt a hint of nausea in my stomach. We walked into the hospital and took the elevator up to the floor where my mother was lying lifeless in a bed. When we reached the lobby area I turned to Shiloh.

"You don't have to come with me," I said. "You don't have to see this."

She squeezed my hand. "I want to, Brian. It's okay. I'll be fine."

She had to be an angel sent from heaven. I would've understood if she wanted to stay in the lobby. I wouldn't have held it against her. But, deep down I knew I needed her and she wasn't going to let me down.

I nodded. "Okay. But, don't feel bad if you have to leave. I'll understand."

She tugged on my hand. "Come on. We can do this."

When we got into the room I noticed that all the bruising and swelling was gone. Aside from the bandage around her head, the casts on her arm and leg and tubes, she looked almost like her normal self. I checked Shiloh's face to see if she was okay. She smiled and nodded as if she knew I was worried about her. I know it may seem insensitive that I was more worried about my girlfriend than my own mother, but I had barely known my mother my entire life. She had never shown me any affection or nurtured me in any way. It wasn't that I didn't care about her. I just didn't know how to love her at all. But, I refused to let her die alone in a strange place. It was the least I could do for her after my father abandoned her to a life of hell.

A nurse came in the room with some forms. She explained apologetically that I had to sign the forms so that they could turn off the ventilator. The whole process was pretty surreal. After the consent had been taken care of she said that she would return with the doctor and asked if I wanted my friends to wait outside.

"No!" The three of us said at the same time.

A few minutes later the nurse returned with Dr. Montgomery. He explained that they would turn off the ventilator and remove the tube from my mother's throat. He prepared me for the sounds I might hear including the monitor that was recording her heartbeat. My stomach began to churn and I could feel a thin film of sweat forming all over my skin.

I stood on one side of the bed while the doctor and nurse stood on the other. I stared down at my mother's face. She looked so peaceful. I'd never seen her look that way. The doctor pressed some buttons on the machine by the bed and the room got quieter. Shiloh stood beside me with both hands wrapped around one of mine while Hunter was behind me with a hand on my shoulder. I was vaguely aware of the distant beeping growing further and further apart. My eyes began to blur and my mother's face became distorted. After a few minutes the beeping became an uninterrupted thin sound. The nurse reached above the bed and silenced the monitor. The doctor leaned over and listened to my mothers chest with his stethoscope.

When he stood back up he said, "Time of death, sixteen thirty-four."

Me legs wobbled and I grabbed onto the arm of the chair next to the bed lowering myself down. Silent tears streamed down my face. I cried for the woman who had been dealt a shitty life that had ultimately ended in violence. I cried for the little boy who never knew the love of a mother. Arms came around my shoulders and I pulled Shiloh into my lap and buried my face against her chest. She held me tightly and kissed the top of my head over and over again. I could hear Hunter quietly talking to someone by the door. The churning in my stomach wouldn't let up. Beads of sweat dripped down my back and a metallic taste filled the back of my mouth. I jumped up pushing Shiloh aside and ran out of the room to the bathroom down the hall. As soon as I reached the stall I heaved into the toilet. I vomited until nothing was left in my stomach. When I was finally able to get some control over my breathing I stepped out of the stall to face Hunter. He didn't give me a look of pity for which I was grateful.

"You okay?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yeah. Sorry about that."

"It's no problem. I was feeling a little queasy myself."

I stepped over to the sink and rinsed my face and mouth with cold water.

"I need a drink," I said.

"Me too. Let's finish up here and we'll pick something up on the way home. I don't know about you but I don't feel much like going out."

I nodded. "I second that."

When we got back to my mother's room Shiloh looked concerned.

I took her hand. "Sorry if I knocked you over."

"It's okay. The nurse asked if you wanted to see the chaplain and I told her no. Is that okay?"

"I don't think I could deal with that right now," I replied.

I turned to Hunter. "Do you think you guys could give me minute alone?"

Hunter nodded. "We'll be out in the lobby waiting."

Shiloh squeezed my hand before leaving the room. I went back to the side of the bed and leaned over my mother's face. I kissed her forehead gently.

"Goodbye mom."

I decided to have my mother's body cremated and her remains buried in a little graveyard nearby. One of the hospital staff gave me the information I needed and I made the arrangements. There would be a small grave side service in two days and that would be the end of it.

### *****

I hadn't been to work in a week. Hunter had explained to Mark and the Maureen what was going on and they told me to take all the time I needed. My mother was buried yesterday and I'd been either drunk or passed out for the past couple of days.

"Rise and shine!" Shiloh said cheerily as she pulled open the curtains letting the sunlight in.

I grabbed a pillow and put it over my head. "Ugh! What time is it?"

She yanked the pillow off my head and jumped onto the bed. "It's eleven-thirty in the morning and you need to get up."

I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her on top of me. "Why don't you come to bed instead?"

She kissed me on the nose. "Nope. We're getting up and going to the beach."

"Ugh. How can you be so cheerful?"

She winked. "Because it's a beautiful day and I'm looking forward to seeing you half naked by the ocean. Besides, I need someone to rub sunscreen on my back so I don't burn."

She was wearing a bright colored sundress and I could see the straps of her bikini tied behind her neck. Her hair was pulled up into a ponytail and she looked fresh, clean and adorable.

"Come on," she whined as she pulled on my arm. "I only have a few more days before classes start and I want to spend them playing."

I shook my head and smiled. I was such a weakling when it came to her. "Alright, alright. I'm getting up."

I made my way into the bathroom and took a quick shower and brushed my teeth. I stepped back into my room naked and Shiloh's eyes widened. I thought that it was cute that she still seemed surprised by my lack of modesty. I was sporting a hard on for her and she was staring straight at it.

"You see something you like?" I teased.

She bit her lower lip.

"You keep staring and I might get the impression that you're using me for my sexy body," I said feigning offense.

"I do love your body," she admitted.

I pulled a pair of shorts from my dresser and put them on. She pouted a little.

"Sorry, baby. You were the one who insisted that we go out to the beach remember?" I leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"I guess I'll just have to use you later," she said grinning.

I tilted her chin up and looked into her eyes. "Thanks."

"For what?" she asked.

"For cheering me up."

She smiled. "That's what I'm here for."

"Believe me you're here for a lot more than that." I smacked her ass and she yelped. "Now, let's go so I can stare at your sexy body all day."

### *****

We spent the day with Hunter and Melanie laying in the sun and playing in the water. As the sun started to get lower in the sky Shiloh and I walked along the beach holding hands. We'd spent the day enjoying hanging out and it felt so normal. Walking along the shore with Shiloh gave me a sense of contentment. After we returned to Hunter and Melanie we all decided to go out to eat at a little seafood place nearby where we could sit outside. The summer was winding down so there weren't as many tourists.

After dinner Hunter and Melanie decided to go out to a club. Shiloh and I declined the invitation. I wanted to spend a quiet night watching movies. I had to go back to work the next night at the bar. I decided to wait until Monday to go back to the shop since that's when Shiloh would start classes.

We spent the rest of the night laying on the couch kissing and groping more than watching the movie. I finally hauled her into the bedroom when she got me to the point that I thought I might lose my mind. We made love until we were both too exhausted to move. And then we talked about everything and nothing. Every minute I spent with her made me want more. It was going to suck when she started classes and I couldn't see her as much.

### Chapter 19

Shiloh

I hadn't seen Brian in three days and I missed him. I was just getting home from a study group and it was late. I shoved through the door of my apartment laying my bag down on the floor near the front door. I was exhausted. It had been over a month since school started and I'd been buried in school work. I hadn't been to the bar or the shop in a couple of weeks. Melanie and I usually saw each other in passing since she was just as busy as me.

One of my professors had announced today that he was pairing us up to work on a huge project that would count as a significant portion of our grade. I was dreading it because I was paired with a guy named Alex who thought he was god's gift to women. He'd flirted with every attractive girl in our class and I'd often seen him trying to work his mojo on women on campus. When he tried to hit on me I quickly told him where he could shove it. Now I was going to be stuck with him as my partner for the rest of the semester. Of all the shitty luck.

I loped to my room wanting nothing more than to crawl in my bed. My phone chimed and I pulled it out of my pocket. It was Brian.

Brian: Welcome home, beautiful.

I stared at the screen in confusion then understanding dawned on me and I smiled. I went down the hall and opened the door to my room. There were candles lit and soft music playing in the background. Brian stood in the doorway leading to the bathroom leaning against the door frame wearing nothing but a pair of boxer briefs. At first, the sight of him was like a mirage in the desert that could fade away if I blinked my eyes. He smiled that sexy smile I love so much and pushed off the door frame. He walked over to me and leaned in to give me a slow, smoldering kiss. As tired as I was I couldn't resist. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around him. He quickly caught me and held me up as I practically devoured his mouth. He tasted so good! When I finally had to come up for air I looked up at him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I was having withdrawals," he replied. "I had to see you and touch you and taste you."

"I've missed you," I said.

He set me down on my feet and pulled my shirt over my head. "I have a little surprise for you."

I cocked my head to the side in question.

He smiled as he continued to undress me. When he had me naked he reached for my hand and led me into the bathroom. I gasped. He'd placed candles throughout the room and the tub was filled with water and bubbles.

I grinned. "A bubble bath!"

"You've been working so hard I thought you deserved a nice, hot bath and a massage."

I didn't miss the hint of desire in his eyes.

"You're amazing," I said.

He took off his briefs then led me into the bath slipping in behind me. The warm water and Brian's arms around me felt heavenly and I relaxed against his chest. His hands slid up my arms and began kneading my shoulders. I could feel the tension slipping away as he pressed his fingers into my muscles. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

"Shiloh," Brian whispered into my ear. "Wake up baby."

My eyelids felt like lead weights as I tried to open them. I was vaguely aware of the water. It took a few moments for me to realize that it was cooler than our bodies. I struggled to sit up. Brian helped me out of the bath and dried me off. He picked me up and carried me to my bed. The last thing I felt was his body curling around mine.

"I love you," he whispered as he kissed the side of my neck.

"Hmm, I love you too," I managed before nodding off.

### *****

My phone was ringing in the distance and I reached out blindly to try to make it stop. Brian reached it before I did. He glanced at the screen.

"Alex, huh?" he said.

"Ugh!" I rolled my eyes. I let it go to voicemail.

I rolled over to snuggle closer to Brian but when I looked up at him I saw something that bothered me. There was a suspicious look in his eyes. Seriously? If he knew what a douchebag Alex was he would probably want to punch the guy. But, what had my heart sinking was that he seemed to be questioning my loyalty. He didn't trust me.

I leaned back and scowled. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Who's Alex?" he asked.

My eyes widened. "He's an egotistical asshole that I unfortunately am stuck doing a project with for one of my classes." I was getting pissed. Was he really doing this? He must've seen the hurt and anger on my face because he rolled to his back and ran his hand through his hair as he sighed.

"I'm sorry baby," he said. "I guess being apart from you so much lately has made me a little crazy."

"Don't you trust me?" my voice cracked a little.

Brian turned back to me and wrapped his arms around me. "Yes. Yes I trust you. I don't know what got into me." He kissed my forehead. "I just miss you."

I kissed his lips. "I miss you too. We knew that things would be different when I went back to school."

"I know. I just can't help worrying that you're going to meet some great guy and realize you could do better."

I wrapped my arms around him tighter. "I already have a great guy. There's no one else I want. Besides, you're the one who has all the girls chasing after you. I'm the one who should be worried."

He smiled. "There are no other girls, Shiloh. You are the only woman I need."

My alarm clock started buzzing killing the moment. I groaned. I wanted nothing more than to spend the day in bed with Brian making up for lost time, but I had classes.

"Do you have time for me to take you to breakfast?" he asked. "Then I could give you a ride to school."

I nodded. "Yeah. That would be good."

We stopped at the little diner that made the awesome hamburgers and had breakfast. There were several groups of students there and I couldn't help noticing that a group of girls sitting nearby were checking Brian out. He seemed oblivious. He kept his attention focused solely on me. When we finished eating Brian drove to campus. He parked and got out of the car. He opened my door for me and reached in to grab my bag tossing it onto his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

He reached out and took my hand. "Walking you to class. Isn't that what a gentleman is supposed to do?"

I laughed. "A gentleman, huh?" I eyed him suspiciously.

He grinned. "Okay there may be a little bit of an ulterior motive in there somewhere."

"Is this one of those things where you get all possessive and make it known that I belong to you?"

He looked at me with shocked amusement. "Of course not! I'm just carrying my woman's bag for her so her back won't be sore. I'm only looking out for you."

I jabbed him in the side. "Liar."

He laughed and put his arm around my shoulder as we walked toward one of the buildings where I had my first class. There were people filing into the class when we reached it. Putting a hand on my jaw he leaned in and kissed me so thoroughly my knees felt weak. Yep. This was definitely a territorial display. I chuckled against his mouth.

"Call me when you need me to pick you up," he said.

"Alright, caveman."

He laughed. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yeah right."

He kissed me again. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Now get to work."

He handed me my bag and turned to walk down the hall giving me a wink over his shoulder. I watched until he turned the corner out of sight. Damned if he wasn't the sexiest man alive! I didn't think I would ever get used to how incredibly gorgeous he was. And, the way he was so attentive to me made my heart melt.

I stepped into my class and took a seat near the front. Even the thought of being forced to work with Alex couldn't kill my mood.

### *****

I was sitting in one of the commons areas studying. My classes were done but I wanted to get ahead. Brian was going to pick me up as soon as he got off work and I'd decided to take the night off from school work so we could spend some time together. I didn't have any classes the next day so I wanted to spend the night with him. After waking up naked in his arms this morning I was craving a whole lot more.

"Look at my new tattoo," I heard a girl say nearby.

I didn't look up from my book but I could see her out of the corner of my eye. It was none other than the pixie girl from the bar who had groped my boyfriend. She was holding her leg out to show some blond girl her ankle where there was a fresh tattoo. Tension seeped into my muscles but I kept my head down hoping she wouldn't notice me. I had no desire for chick drama.

"That's not all I got," she said in a lowered voice.

"Really?" the blond asked.

"Oh yeah. After he got done with the tattoo we went in the back and fucked like savages." She laughed.

"Oh my god!" The blond gaped. "You little slut! Who was it this time?"

She leaned her head a little closer to the blond. "Remember the guy I told you about? The bartender that was so amazing in the sack?"

"Brian?" her friend asked.

"Yep. He works at a tattoo shop. I stopped by and got this done. Then he took me in the back."

My stomach turned and bile rose into my throat. Trust. Trust. Trust. I had to keep reminding myself that Brian loved me and he wouldn't betray me. This girl was nothing but a lying skank. She had to know I was sitting there and could hear every word she was saying. She was trying to goad me into something and I couldn't fall for it. She had been throwing herself at Brian all summer and he had ignored her completely. We'd seen her at a couple of parties and it never failed that she would try to come onto Brian. I knew that he'd had sex with her. He'd been completely honest with me about it. He didn't even know her name, just called her psycho pixie chick.

"I swear to god, he has the biggest cock and knows how to use it," pixie was saying. "And he gets all into the kinky shit. It's so hot."

I closed my book. I couldn't listen to anymore of her bullshit. I mean, really? What was this, high school? I was a college senior honor student. There was no way I was going to play some childish game with a deranged slut. I packed away my things and started for the door. As I passed by her she caught my eye and gave me a sneering smile. I feigned boredom and kept walking. In truth, my heart was pounding and I felt the sting of tears prick my eyes.

Once outside I took some deep breaths to clear my head. Brian still had another hour before he got off work so I decided to grab a cab and surprise him. I was heading across the campus lawn when I heard a voice call out my name. I looked up and saw Alex coming toward me. Ugh! Just what I needed. He had a broad smile on his face. He was definitely a good looking guy, but nowhere near as hot as my man. He was also a scumbag when it came to women. I rolled my eyes.

"Hey, you want to grab a bite to eat and start going over our project?" he asked.

"Now really isn't a good time," I replied.

He stepped a little closer invading my personal bubble and I stepped back. "Come on Shiloh. We have a lot of work to do and I know you want to ace this thing."

I gave him a piercing look. "I said not right now."

He reached over and put a hand on my arm and I jerked it away. "What the fuck?"

"Don't touch me," I seethed. "I see no reason why we need to spend any time together for this project. You do your part and I'll do mine. It's pretty simple."

He shook his head. "What are you, some kind of frigid bitch?"

Before I had time to realize what was happening Alex's head was jerked backward as a fist landed on his jaw. He hit the ground looking dazed and shocked.

"She said no, motherfucker." Brian stood over him with his fists clenched and every muscle in his arms and chest bulged.

Alex tried to regain his ground and scrambled up. "You fucking..."

He didn't get a chance to finish his sentence as another blow hit him directly in the nose. Blood poured down his lips and chin.

"Let me make myself very clear," Brian said in a voice that was pure venom. "You ever fucking touch her or even look at her the wrong way again and I'll kill you. Got it?"

The way Brian was glaring down at Alex made me think he actually meant it. Alex must have thought so too because he just nodded as he backed away slowly. I snapped out of my state of shock.

"Brian! What are you doing?"

He put his arm around my shoulders and led me away toward the parking lot. "He should've listened to you the first time. I've seen that piece of shit around. He earned it."

We got to the car and he held the door open as I climbed in. When he was inside the car I turned to him.

"You can't just go around beating up people like that!" I exclaimed.

His eyes were still fierce. "I know that guy, Shiloh and I know how he operates. I don't want you anywhere near him."

"Excuse me?" I asked. "Since when do you decide who I can and can't be around?"

He gave me a look of frustration. "That guy is bad news. He treats women like shit."

"If I recall correctly it wasn't that long ago the same could be said about you," I blurted out. I regretted the words the moment they flew from my lips and my hand reflexively went to cover my mouth.

The flash of pain on Brian's face was quickly covered with a hard expression. He gave a curt nod and faced the windshield as he gunned the engine and slammed on the gas. I wished I could turn back time and undo what I had just done. I was angry and I lashed out at him unfairly. And I feared that I had caused damage that I wouldn't be able to repair. Brian's past was something he feared would come between us and I'd just used it against him. I knew one of the reasons Brian loved me was because I didn't judge him. With one sentence I had effectively played judge, jury and executioner. I had really screwed up. I could tell by the look on his face. The one that he gave to nearly everyone but me. He was cold and hard. His walls were firmly in place and it was all my fault. My stomach knotted and I felt sick. Something deep inside me coiled in terror at the thought that I may have just lost the love of my life.

### Chapter 20

Brian

I felt like Shiloh had just sucker punched me in the nuts before ripping out my heart. There was no question she regretted what she said by the look on her face. But, it was too late. It was already out there. How could she defend that asshole? He was a predator and there were plenty of girls he'd taken advantage of. Unwilling girls. When I saw him put his hand on her arm I sprinted. I wanted to break every bone in his body. If it weren't for Shiloh I'd be sitting in the back of a cop car right now. Even that would be better than the hell I was in at the moment. All the reassurances that she didn't judge me for my past had been turned into lies the minute she spat out those words to me. Had she felt that way all along? How could I have been so stupid to think she could see me as anything more than some player who used women? Maybe I was but I would never have forced any woman to have sex with me. Shiloh had essentially just told me that I was as low as a filthy rapist.

My blood was boiling and my entire body felt like it had been run over by a train. My chest was so tight I could hardly breathe. It took everything for me to sit next to her. I sped to her apartment. I needed to get distance. I had let her get too close. I'd fallen in love and allowed her to root herself deep inside my soul against my better judgment. I should have known that one day she would tear me to pieces. I did know. I just ignored the warnings in my head. Now here it was. The truth of what she really thought of me. The truth of what I had always known about myself. I may not be as shitty as Alex, but I wasn't that far behind. And, now I knew that Shiloh thought so, too.

I pulled up to her apartment and parked. I couldn't look at her.

"Brian I..." her voice cracked and I knew if I looked at her face I would see tears and cave.

So I stared out the window. "Let me tell you a thing or two about your buddy Alex. That motherfucker should be in prison for what he's done. The girls he's fucked haven't always been aware enough to refuse. He's drugged them and forced them to have sex. So if that's what you want, then by all means have fun."

"I didn't mean it. I swear. I was just angry about the pixie girl and then Alex; and you trying to tell me what to do." Her voice was pleading. "You know I don't see you like that."

Wait. What? "What about the pixie chick? Now you're holding that against me too?"

"No!" She paused. "She was telling her friend that she went by the shop today and you gave her a tattoo and then had sex with her."

I couldn't help it I had to see her face. "What?! And you believed her?"

My heart was crushing just looking at her crying. I wanted to reach out and pull her into my arms. But I wasn't the one who had lied. I wasn't the one that put us in this situation. I'd let myself believe she could love me despite all the shit I had done. I'd let myself believe that she saw something in me that was good. Good enough to be with her. In the end I had been nothing but a complete idiot.

"No! Of course I didn't believe her! I knew she was trying to get to me. I left the commons to get away from her. That's when I ran into Alex. I was going to surprise you and take a cab to the shop." More tears streamed down her face. "Please, Brian. Please let's just go inside and talk this out. You know I love you. You know I don't hold your past against you. It was just something I said out of anger. Please. Please believe me."

My heart wanted to believe her but I couldn't get her words out of my head. I closed my eyes so I wouldn't have to keep seeing her beautiful, sad face. If I went inside with her I knew we would work it out. But, how long would it be before she realized that no matter how much she wants to believe that my wild past didn't matter, it really did? It was only a matter of time before the thoughts of all the women I had been with would haunt her. And, not long after that would be the realization that she was with someone who had sold himself. How long would it take for her to cringe from my touch? No, I had to distance myself now before her absence had the power to kill me. Who was I kidding? I was about to jump into the abyss.

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. With every ounce of strength I could summon I turned to her and said, "I don't know what to believe anymore. I've always known you deserved better, and now you're realizing it too. You may not see it like that right now. But, it's just a matter of time before you do. I don't see any reason to prolong the inevitable."

"Brian no! Don't do this!" She reached out to touch my arm and I backed away.

I buried my heart and stared at her with ice in my eyes. "Get out."

Her face went white and she stared at me for a moment looking panic stricken. She had to go. I couldn't take seeing her much more before I would lose it completely. My insides were being shredded and I could feel the nausea building. My head felt light but I had to keep it together until I could get away from her. The look on her face would forever be branded in my skull. I had just given up the most important thing in my life. As she got out of the car and walked away a stone settled where my heart used to be before I gave it away. What was the point of anything anymore? In that moment I realized I had made the biggest mistake of my life. And I deserved every bit of misery I would suffer for it.

### *****

I sat in a daze in front of the TV. I'd stopped by Gary's and picked up some of the stuff that had sent me into oblivion before. The screen was a blur and the voices from the speakers were incoherent. I heard a loud banging sound then felt myself being lifted off the couch by the front of my shirt. Was someone screaming in my face? I didn't know. It didn't really matter. Nothing mattered at that point. My body fell backward and something rammed into my cheek. It was vaguely painful but I was numb. I had the errant thought that I was probably going to feel it later. Another pounding to the other side of my face sent me into darkness.

I tried to open my eyes but only one would cooperate. I lifted my fingers to my face and winced as I touched my swollen eye. The more conscious I became the more the throbbing kicked in. My head was pounding, my face pulsing. As I sat up I got that familiar feeling of vertigo and my stomach churned. I jumped off the couch and ran to the bathroom slamming my shoulder against the door frame in the process. I just made it to the toilet then vomited violently until there was nothing but dry heaves remaining. Sweat poured down my face and body and I was shaking all over. I gasped for air as I rested my forehead on the toilet seat. Then reality kicked in. The memory of her face her eyes red and puffy with tears. Iron hands reached into my chest and squeezed so hard I started heaving again. I fell to the floor on my side and sobs racked my body. I don't know how long I lay there but it felt like forever.

I struggled to my feet and grabbed my keys off the counter. I needed to feel the wind blowing. I climbed on my bike and put on my helmet. I headed away from the city toward the desert. As civilization faded away I tried to focus on the white and yellow lines. It was harder than it should be. I was vaguely aware that I was crossing over the lines right before I heard the crunching of metal scraping against concrete. I felt the sensation of flying for a few moments then excruciating pain as my body fell back to earth. I heard snapping sounds that were accompanied by lightning bolts of agony. I tried to move and screamed out. My vision narrowed and my head swam until everything went black.

### Chapter 21

Shiloh

I just kept shaking my head as I repeated the same sentence over and over again. "I shouldn't have said it. I shouldn't have said it."

Melanie's hand smoothed across my back. "You didn't mean it. Just give him some time. He's just upset. He'll realize he loves you and he'll come back."

I stared off aimlessly. "No he won't. Maybe if I'd said anything else, but not after that. I hit him where it hurt most. I struck the heart of his insecurity when it comes to us. You didn't see how he looked at me. I've lost him."

Melanie just sat silently rubbing my back. She'd called Hunter and told him to come over. I wasn't sure that was such a good idea. I knew that even if I explained that it was my fault Brian and I had broken up he would probably take one look at his little sister crying and see Brian as the guilty one. He wouldn't see the look of pain in Brian's eyes that I saw when I said what I did.

"Shiloh!" Hunter's voice came from the living room.

"We're back here," Melanie called back.

Hunter took one look at me and his eyes went hard. "What did he do?"

"He didn't do anything," I said. "It's my fault."

"I'm going to beat the shit out of him!"

Hunter didn't give me a chance to explain. He just turned and stormed out the door. Now I was responsible for driving a wedge between Hunter and Brian. I needed to be alone so I told Melanie that I wanted to go to sleep.

"If you need anything just come and get me," she said as she left my room closing the door behind her.

I wanted to hope that Melanie was right and Brian would forgive me, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I got out of bed and changed into Brian's tee shirt. It still smelled like him and that made the tears come with full force. I crawled into bed and cried into my pillow. The longing to feel him next to me was so powerful that I balled myself up as tight as I could. My insides had been carved out and I felt empty and hollow. I didn't know how I was going to deal with this. It hurt so much and I just wanted to wake up next to him and realize that this had all been some horrible nightmare. But I knew that this wasn't a dream. This was my version of hell and I was certain it wasn't going to get better for a very long time. If ever. I cried until I had nothing left in me and my body succumbed to fitful sleep.

### *****

"Shiloh." The voice was a man's voice and my heart leapt until I realized it wasn't Brian's.

I opened my eyes. They were puffy and dry. I was confused when I saw Hunter standing over me. My confusion turned to dread when I took in his pale face and gaunt eyes. Something was very wrong. I sat up quickly.

"What's wrong?!" I said in panic.

He sat next to me. Were his eyes red? Had he been crying? He seemed to be trying to figure out how to say something.

He sighed heavily and looked down at his hands. "There's been an accident. Brian is in the hospital."

"What?!" I jumped up and grabbed a pair of jeans struggling to get them on. "What happened? Is he okay? Please tell me he's okay. We have to go there!"

Hunter grabbed my hand and pulled me back to the bed making me sit down. He looked in my eyes, his expression grave.

"Shiloh, he was on his bike. He was driving out toward the desert and ran into a concrete overpass. He's in critical condition"

Bile hit the back of my throat as my stomach churned. The blood drained from my face and I began to feel light headed.

"Oh my god!" I jumped up again. "We have to go now!"

We arrived at the hospital and were directed toward the surgery waiting area. It was nearly dawn and Brian had been in surgery for several hours. Neither of us knew what the extent of his injuries were. All they could tell us was that his condition was critical. I rubbed the charms on my necklace between my fingers. Hunter stood up and took my hand.

"Come on. Let's go get some air," he said.

"But, what if something happens? What if there's news?" I was afraid to leave.

"We'll just step right outside." He gave me a guilty look. "I need to tell you something."

I sat on a bench while Hunter paced in front of me.

"I hit him," he admitted. "I actually punched him. A couple of times."

"Why? I told you it wasn't his fault," I asked.

"When I saw you so upset I just went nuts. And then I got back home and Brian was all fucked up on some shit. He was in some kind of daze just staring off at nothing. I yelled at him but he wouldn't respond. So I hit him. Knocked him out. When I left he was passed out on the couch."

"You left him like that? What the fuck is wrong with you, Hunter?"

"I know! I was just so pissed off." He shook his head. "I feel like a shitty friend and shitty brother. I should have listened to you. Maybe I could have talked some sense into him when he sobered up. I don't know. At the very least I wouldn't have let him go off on his bike while on drugs."

"Oh god, Hunter. What if he doesn't make it?" The thought had every cell in my body shattering.

I stood up. "This is all my fault. If I hadn't said what I said we never would have fought and he would never have ended things between us. He wouldn't have gone off and done those drugs or got on his motorcycle."

Hunter wrapped me in a hug. "It's not your fault. I never should have left him like that. At the very least I should have taken his keys."

I pulled away from Hunter. "I need to go back inside."

We sat next to each other and I rested my head on Hunter's shoulder. All we could do was wait. It was torture. I couldn't sleep. All I could do was think about Brian. The memories flooded through my brain in gushing waves. How my breath caught the first time I saw him. The dimple in his cheek when he gave me his sexy smile. When he played the guitar for me in Paul's basement then kissed me. How adorably nervous he was when he asked me on a date. Every single bone melting kiss. I choked on a sob as I recalled the first time we made love. I could hear his voice as if he were sitting next to me telling me that he loved me. I cried silently as I replayed every single precious moment I shared with Brian through my mind. Hunter held my hand and we continued to wait.

I must've dozed off because I was startled when I heard a man's voice say, "Mr. Stone?"

I looked up and there was a doctor wearing blue scrubs standing in front of us. I was instantly alert. Hunter stood up and shook the doctor's hand.

"I'm Hunter Stone," he introduced. "This is my sister Shiloh."

"Mr. Stone I'm doctor Miller. Does Mr. Curtis have any next of kin?"

Hunter shook his head. "No. We're the only family he has."

"Very well. Mr. Stone, Mr. Curtis sustained a multitude of serious injuries. He has a compound femur fracture, a fractured hip and a fractured arm. We had to set all the limbs and rebuild his hip. These are all injuries that will heal. My major concern is his spine. There was damage to several of his vertebrae that resulted in damage to his spinal cord. We've done extensive repairs but it may take quite some time before we know whether the surgery was a success."

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"Fortunately, the area of the spinal cord that was damaged was low. Worst case scenario he will be paralyzed from the waist down. Dr. Andrews is an excellent spinal surgeon so we're trying to be optimistic. We just feel it is important for you to know all the possible outcomes. It was very fortunate for him that he was wearing a helmet. He could have been killed."

My mind was trying to make sense of the doctor's words. Paralyzed?

"When can we see him?" Hunter asked.

"He's still in recovery but as soon as he's stabilized we'll be moving him up to the orthopedic floor. You can see him there." He hesitated. "Do you know if Mr. Curtis has insurance?"

"No," Hunter said. "But, it won't be a problem. Whatever expenses he incurs can be billed directly to me."

"If you'll go to the billing office they can provide you with all the forms you'll need to sign," Dr. Miller said.

Hunter nodded. After the doctor left we went to clear up all the paperwork. Hunter signed financial responsibility forms.

"Brian has a considerable amount of money saved but that's for his shop. I won't let him lose it all over this," he explained.

I understood. If Hunter hadn't signed for it I would have. I would be getting my trust fund after graduation as well. Neither one of us was prepared to discuss the possibility that Brian may never walk again. It was still too new of a concept. For all I knew I wouldn't even be a part of Brian's life at all. We waited in the lobby on the orthopedic floor until a nurse came and told us we could go in and see Brian.

"The anesthesia hasn't fully worn off yet, so he's still asleep. But you can sit with him," she informed us.

When we walked into the room cold fear gripped my heart. Brian was lying motionless except for his slow breathing. One of his eyes was black and blue and swollen shut. His hair was messy and there were still flecks of dirt in it. There was a cast on his left arm, one all the way up his left leg to his hip and one on his lower right leg. An IV was in his right arm and bags of clear liquid dripped above him. There were some bandages on his right arm. The monitor beeped a steady rhythm.

I sat in a chair next to his bed and took his hand in mine. For the first time his big hand seemed small. I lay my head down and pressed my cheek against the back of his hand. I knew then and there that no matter what happened if he would have me back I would stay with him and love him forever. After several hours Hunter was sleeping sprawled out on the little loveseat snoring softly. I ran my fingers over Brian's hand.

"Please come back to me, baby," I whispered. "Please, please come back to me."

"Shiloh," I heard a ragged whisper. "Shiloh."

My head jerked up. His eyes were still closed and his forehead was scrunched up. Hunter's phone alarmed and he woke up and shut it off. He rubbed his eyes and yawned. It was four o'clock in the afternoon.

"I have to go to work," he said. "I'll come back in the morning. You staying?"

I nodded. I wasn't going anywhere. I'd already decided that if I needed to I would put off the rest of the semester and go back after Brian was well. That is, if he even wanted me around. Hunter left and I continued to sit by Brian's side until I nodded off .

### Chapter 22

Brian

I opened one eye and glanced around. It was obvious I was in a hospital room. My head still throbbed and I vowed I would give Hunter a little payback when I got better. I knew why he'd hit me but he could've at least waited until I was able to defend myself. That was just a low blow. I tried to move my arms and realized that my left arm was weighed down by a heavy cast. What the fuck? I wiggled the fingers on my right arm and felt something soft. I craned my neck up to see what it was. My heart flipped when I saw the length of golden hair streaming over the sheet. Shiloh. She was here leaning over in a chair with her head on the bed by my hip.

I had a vague recollection of getting on my bike and the swerving lines on the road then the pain. It was easy to put the pieces together and figure out I had wrecked my bike. I looked down the bed and saw the casts on my legs. Fuck! I'd gone and tore myself up. My fingers reflexively stroked Shiloh's hair seeking comfort. She lifted her head slowly and yawned before she turned to look at me.

"Brian, you're awake!" she said. She grabbed my hand and held it in hers. "Oh, thank goodness."

Her crystal eyes were red and puffy and fresh tears pooled in them. I couldn't keep looking at her. I needed to keep my emotions in check and seeing her looking at me with those sad eyes wasn't helping matters. Once again I'd gone and done something to make her cry. Shiloh didn't deserve someone as fucked up as I was. She deserved to be with someone who wouldn't put that look of desperation and worry on her face. She deserved someone who wouldn't get blitzed out of his mind on drugs and then get on a motorcycle. What kind of life could I ever possibly give her? What if we had kids one day and they had to live without their father because he was stupid enough to get fucked up and go for a drive? Shiloh needed someone stable who could give her a full life. And that someone was definitely not me. My current situation was proof of that.

I pulled my hand from hers and rang for the nurse. I put on my most impassive expression while my heart plummeted into my gut.

"You should leave," I said.

"Brian, please don't shut me out," she pleaded. "I'm so sorry for what I said to you. You have to know I didn't mean it. I love you."

I kept my eyes on the wall across from me. The hurt in her voice was a vice grip in my chest. As much as I wanted to hold her in my arms and kiss her I knew that it was only because I'm a selfish bastard. She was worth more than anything I could give her. I could only offer her more heartache.

The nurse came into the room. "Mr. Curtis, you're awake. I'll page the doctors."

Within minutes a thin man wearing a white coat came into the room. "Mr. Curtis, I'm Dr. Miller. I performed the surgery to your spine."

My spine? What the fuck was he talking about? He must have seen the confusion on my face because he began to explain.

"You damaged your spinal cord in the accident. I was able to repair it, but it will take a lot of healing before we know exactly how much function you'll regain to your legs."

"Are you telling me that I'm paralyzed?" I asked incredulously.

He nodded. "For the time being, yes. But, I'm optimistic that as time goes by you'll regain feeling. How much is yet to be determined. All things considered I feel the surgery went very well. Quite honestly, you're lucky to be alive."

Lucky. Yeah. At that moment I was just sorry I didn't die in that accident. I had yet another reason I needed to let Shiloh go. I couldn't even please her the way a man should anymore. After the doctor left I turned to face Shiloh. The look of pity on her face sent me over the edge.

"Why are you still here?" I asked in the coldest voice I could muster.

I refused to let the look of pain in her eyes effect me. She had to realize that I was bad for her. I had to make her see that she needed to get away from me and stay away. It was for her own good.

"Brian please..."

"Get. Out."

"Why are you doing this? I know this is hard but we can work together..."

I raised my voice. "What the fuck, Shiloh? How many times do I have to tell you to leave? This is over. You need to move on and find someone else." Just the thought of her with another man made my insides twist painfully.

"I know you still love me, Brian. I don't know why you're doing this to us."

I turned my head away from her. "Leave, Shiloh. And don't come back."

Finally she stood and walked out of the room. I could hear her crying as she walked away. I closed my eyes to try to keep my own tears at bay. I hoped the day would come when I wouldn't feel as dead and empty inside as I did right then. Or maybe it was best I didn't feel anything at all because numbness would be better than the pain of losing the only woman I ever loved. The only woman I ever would love.

### *****

It took eight months of intense physical therapy but I had finally made it back to normal. After the feeling returned to my legs and the casts came off I dove head first into my therapy. I spent hours every day working to rebuild my strength. After a few months I was able to go back to work at the shop. Every day I woke up, went to therapy, then went to work. My life had become robotic. Even my relationship with Hunter had become more polite greetings in passing. We'd finally opened up a tattoo shop and I spent most of my time there. The business was going pretty well, so Hunter quit working at the bar. When we didn't have clients I usually spent most of my time drawing. I had several sketch books filled with drawings of Shiloh. It was like an obsession and probably an unhealthy form of self torture, but I couldn't help it. The image of her haunted me.

The first few weeks after the accident Hunter kept on me about Shiloh. After a while I guess he got tired of hearing my reasons for letting her go because he finally gave up. Even now after all these months I couldn't get her out of my mind. She was like this permanent fixture in my head. There wasn't a moment of each day that I wasn't thinking about her.

I guess that's why I ended up where I was, standing at the very back of the auditorium. When her name was announced over the speakers my heart sped up. She walked across the stage wearing a formless black robe and graduation cap. I couldn't take my eyes off her. She took her diploma and turned to face the audience. My breath caught. She should have been smiling and full of joy. Instead her face was indifferent. Guilt squeezed my guts. Somewhere deep down I knew I was the reason she wore that look. I'd smothered the light and sunshine that used to radiate from her. I'd taken this perfect sculpture and broken it.

I turned to leave when her eyes caught hold of mine. For a fraction of a second I saw them light up. I headed out the door before I could allow that moment to give me even an ounce of hope. Because, there was no doubt in my mind that if Shiloh were ever willing to give me another chance I'd drop to my knees and beg for it. I'd been the epitome of misery since the day I told her to go away. Even opening the shop hadn't made me feel anything. My passion for art was extinguished. I drew tattoos like I was on autopilot. I hadn't come up with any new designs in so long.

I walked toward my car when a voice called out my name. I froze. With that one word she had my blood heating and my heart rate in overdrive.

"Brian!" she called out again when I didn't turn around.

I finally turned and saw her jogging toward me. She held her hat in one hand and her diploma in the other. She looked so beautiful with her hair in waves down her back and her pale pink cheeks. It was painful to look at her. She stopped in front of me and I got a whiff of her fresh, clean scent. Fuck, how I missed that! She gave me a smile that didn't reach her eyes. They weren't as bright as I remembered and my heart lurched with sadness and regret. The regret ate at me every day. It was my constant companion and no stronger had it been than at that moment.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. She seemed timid and I wanted to beat myself for playing a part in breaking down any of her strength and vitality.

"I just wanted to see you graduate," I replied. "Congratulations, by the way."

She tucked a piece of fly away hair behind her ear. "Thanks. Umm...we're going out after this. Do you want to come?"

There was no way I could spend the evening hanging out with Shiloh without losing my mind. I'd probably end up in jail for beating up any guy who flirted with her. I knew she didn't have a boyfriend. Hunter at least kept reminding me of that. But, guys were always hitting on Shiloh. They couldn't help themselves. It was like moths to a light bulb. I should know. I was caught in her glow from the first moment I laid eyes on her. And, for some reason she let me into her heart. Until I ruined it. Yet, here she was being kind and asking if I wanted to go out and celebrate with her. The overwhelming sensation of every ounce of love and emotion I felt for her compounded in that one moment making it difficult to breathe. The lump in my throat threatened to strangle me as I stood before the most incredible woman I'd ever had the honor of loving and being loved by. The only woman I would ever give my heart to. She would own me forever, even if I never got to feel her love again.

"I can't," I managed. "But, thanks for the offer."

Was that a look of disappointment on her face? I must have been imagining things. Conjuring up wishful thinking. Her eyes softened.

"I'm glad to see you've gotten better. It must have been a really hard recovery."

Why was she being nice to me? Eight months ago I broke her heart. She should be screaming at me and calling me every evil thing she could come up with.

"Yeah. It was." It was all I could say. It was taking all my will power to keep from throwing myself at her feet and begging her to take me back, to give me another chance. My arms were straining against the urge to wrap themselves around her and never let go. Being close to her without being able to touch her was physical torture. It had always been like that. Whenever I was near her I needed to touch her, to feel that connection with her. Nothing had changed except that now I had no right to touch her. I had given that up a long time ago.

"Well, it was good seeing you again," she said. "Maybe I'll see you around before I leave."

She was leaving? My throat closed while my heart screamed in agony. Panic ran through my veins like battery acid. Why hadn't Hunter told me she was leaving? Maybe I would have grown the balls to do something about it.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"San Francisco. I got in to a Masters program there."

No! She couldn't go away. "Shiloh, listen...about the things I said..."

"You don't have to apologize, Brian. I understand why you did it. I want you to know there are no hard feelings. I can't imagine what you were going through."

How could I be such a fucking idiot? How could I have ever convinced myself that breaking up with Shiloh was the right thing to do?

"I'm sorry I fucked everything up," I whispered.

Her eyes welled with tears and she looked down at her hands. "Yeah. Me too."

She turned and walked back to the auditorium and I just stood there feeling helpless.

### *****

It was early in the morning when I woke. The minute my eyes opened I knew what I had to do. I had to get Shiloh back. I had no idea how I was going to go about it, but I had never been more certain of anything that without her I might as well put a bullet in my head because I was useless. I went to the gym, then headed to the shop. After work I planned to find her and talk to her. I'd tell her every fucked up thing in my head that made me act the way I did. Then I'd beg her to give me another chance. If it meant that I had to follow her to San Francisco or half way around the world I'd do it.

It was close to closing time and I was putting supplies away in the back room when I heard the door chime. Ugh! Not now. I wanted to get out of there. I should have locked the door and turned the closed sign around.

"Be there in a sec," I called out.

I closed the door to the back room behind me as I walked back into the shop. When I looked up I stopped mid stride. There stood Shiloh in the middle of the room. A tear slipped from her eye as she looked up at me. That was more than I could take. I ran for her and pulled her into my arms.

"Baby, I'm so sorry! I'm sorry! Please, I'm begging you, don't leave. Please, I need you. Fuck, Shiloh. I've been dead the past eight months without you." I buried my face in her hair while tears streamed down my face. I didn't care that I was crying. "Please, please, please give me another chance. I promise I'll never let you go again. I love you so much." I set her down on her feet and took her face in my hands. "I'll do whatever you want. Just please give me the chance to show you how much I love you. You are the only one for me. I was an idiot for pushing you away. I've never regretted anything so much in my life. I think about you all the time. I can't get you out of my head and heart." I was rambling but I didn't care. I was a desperate man. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I'm so lost without you, baby."

She stared at me silently and fear gripped my heart. What if she didn't love me anymore? What if she just came here to say goodbye? I didn't think I'd be able to handle that. Losing her once nearly killed me. How would I survive it if she went away? After several more excruciating seconds she looked into my eyes. My heart thudded loudly in anticipation. Then she leaned forward and placed her lips to mine. I nearly sobbed in relief. She wrapped her arms around my neck and I clung to her for dear life. In that moment of forgiveness I realized that I was the luckiest guy on the planet and there was nothing in the world that could ever make me let her go again. I'd rather die than lose her. Even with pink splotches around her eyes and cheeks and puffy eyes she was by far the most beautiful thing in the world. Kissing her lips was like coming home.

When we finally came up for air Shiloh looked up at me and smiled.

"I was wondering how long it was going to take for you to come to your senses," she said.

"Far too long," I replied. "I should have never let you go in the first place."

"Hunter told me you were miserable. I was afraid you wouldn't want to see me so I stayed away."

"I'm so sorry I hurt you, Shiloh. I had myself convinced that I was too fucked up to deserve you. When the doctor told me I was paralyzed it gave me one more reason to push you away. The thought of not being able to make love to you nearly killed me. I figured it was only a matter of time before you'd realize you needed more than some impotent fuck up."

"It's always been you, Brian. My heart belongs to you."

"You own me, Shiloh. Since the first day I met you I've been a goner. You own my heart and soul," I confessed.

### Chapter 23

Shiloh

For eight months I avoided going over to Hunter's. I was terrified that Brian had moved on and I knew I wouldn't be able to handle seeing some random woman he might have had over. My graduation day was the first time I saw him since the hospital. Hunter often spent time at our place with Melanie and would frequently give me updates on Brian's progress. He never said anything about Brian seeing other women, but I always figured that he would revert back to his old ways since we were apart. The thought of him with another woman made my stomach turn, but I refused to judge. During our time apart I had no right to him.

After seeing him at graduation the look in his eyes made me think that he still had feelings for me. I'd gone out with Hunter and Melanie and some of our friends, but the whole night I was thinking of Brian. The longing for him that never seemed to go away tugged at my heart harder than ever. By the end of the night Hunter had figured it out. He sat beside me at the bar where I was sipping my only beer of the night.

"What's going on with you, Shiloh?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I guess I'm just not feeling it tonight."

Brian threw his hands up. "What is it with you two? I mean, seriously? You both love each other. You've both been miserable for the past eight months. Yet, neither of you will budge. I mean, this stubbornness is fucking ridiculous!"

I looked into my glass. "He came to graduation."

"Yeah? That's because he fucking loves you. He just can't get past all his guilt and regret." Hunter sighed. "Did you know he hasn't drawn anything but pictures of you since the accident? He tries to come up with other designs but he can't seem to picture anything but you. It's a good thing he has a stock pile of other stuff or we'd go out of business."

"I asked him to come out with us, but he wouldn't."

"Well, no shit, Shiloh. I mean, what was it like for you to talk to him?"

"Hard. Really hard." I felt the tears fill my eyes. "All I could think about was how much I missed him and how sad he looked. And I remembered that it was my fault he got in that accident and everything he had to go through to recover."

Hunter put his arm over my shoulder. "You have to stop blaming yourself. You didn't cause him to get wasted and get on that bike. That was all his old shit. He just didn't know how to handle it. He knows it. You guys have spent all this time blaming yourselves for something instead of forgiving each other and being happy. You two belong together. And I'm sick of watching the two people I love most walk around like pathetic zombies."

I turned and snapped, "And just what the hell am I supposed to do about it? He can't even stand being near me anymore, Hunter! Besides, I'm leaving in a couple of weeks."

"Oh really? Do you honestly think you can walk away from him and this will all go away? How long will it take before you come back or he runs after you? Don't you get it? You guys are made for each other. Brian's a fucking basket case and you spend all your time trying to keep it together. Melanie and I have considered an intervention."

"I don't know what to do," I replied.

Was Brian really that unhappy because of me? Did he really miss me as much I missed him? Could he still love me?

Hunter leaned back in his chair. "You know damn well that Brian is probably terrified of asking you for a second chance. He always did have it in his head that he wasn't good enough for you. I've tried to tell him he's wrong but he won't listen to me. You're the only one who could get through to him."

I stood outside the shop. My nerves were going crazy and my heart beat hard. The door still had the open sign. What if he had a client? Or worse, what if he was with some woman? I needed to stop freaking out. The worst case scenario I would tell him how I felt and he wouldn't return those feelings. It would probably kill me but not knowing was already accomplishing that at a slower pace. The image of Brian telling me to leave flashed in my mind. The cold, hard voice and eyes that could cut glass. My heart tightened and I forced myself to take a deep breath. I had to force myself to step forward and open the door.

I stepped through the door hearing the sound of the chime. I looked around and saw drawings all over the walls. There was a counter beside the door with a cash register sitting on top of a long glass case. An assortment of different jewelry was held within the case. There were pictures of Lance and Brian as well as another of Matt, Brian and Hunter. A photographic catalog of fresh tattoos was on a large board. I walked further into the shop and saw two work stations set up. The rest of the room was empty. A door at the back of the shop stood ajar and my heart started to race.

"Be there in a sec," I heard Brian's voice.

My breathing sped up and I wrung my hands together. Maybe I had time to leave before he came in here and saw me. I actually considered it for a moment before I heard Hunter's words in my head. Fresh tears welled and slipped out. I would never be able to get over Brian unless I knew he truly didn't love me anymore. The thought of him not loving me felt like a jagged edge scraping through my heart, but I had to know one way or another. I took another deep breath. Brian walked through the door and my heart seemed to stop completely. The look of surprise on his face softened instantly when he saw me. He ran to me and pulled me into his arms. He kept apologizing, begging, and telling me how much he loved me. He was crying. My heart soared so high. I was so overwhelmed with relief that I couldn't say anything. I leaned up and kissed him with every emotion I could put behind it.

### *****

Two months later...

I stepped into Brian's shop and Hunter stopped me inside the door.

"He's busy right now," Hunter said.

"Alright!" Brian called from the back of the shop a few minutes later.

"Close your eyes," Hunter instructed.

What was going on here? Hunter folded his arms over his chest.

"Okay, okay," I huffed. I closed my eyes and Hunter led me toward the back of the shop.

"You can open your eyes now," Brian said.

I opened my eyes and my mouth watered. Brian was standing in front of me without his shirt on. Kade, a guy Brian had hired months ago and had become good friends with, sat nearby cleaning a tattoo gun. Then I noticed the fresh tattoo positioned over Brian's heart. It was my name in an elaborate script underneath a picture of my face.

"What do you think?" he asked.

"I think it's beautiful. How did you make me look so pretty?" I was astounded by how he had taken my face and made it look so lovely.

"Are you kidding me?" He seemed confused. Brian took me by the shoulders and led me to a tall mirror. "Look at yourself. How can you not see that you are the most beautiful thing in the world?"

Standing there with Brian all I could focus on was how incredible he looked. But, if that was how he saw me, then I wasn't going to argue. I pointed to the tattoo on his chest.

"You know that's permanent right?" I teased.

He smiled. "I'm counting on it."

Brian put his shirt on and grabbed his keys. He and Hunter exchanged a conspiratorial look before Brian took my hand.

"Come on," he said. "I want to show you something."

We drove toward the beach and Brian pulled into the parking lot in front of a building that housed several condos.

"What are we doing here?" I asked.

"You'll see." He came around and took my hand as I got out of the car.

We walked toward one of the end units and Brian pulled out a key from his pocket then inserted it into the lock.

"Close your eyes," He said.

I did as he said. "What's going on?"

"Just come with me. I think you're going to like my surprise."

I followed him into the condo until he stopped. "Now open your eyes."

I opened my eyes and gasped. We were standing in the living room of a beautiful condo with a glorious view of the ocean. The living room and open kitchen were separated by a bar height counter and island. All the appliances looked brand new. The ceilings were vaulted making the room feel spacious and airy. The furnishings looked new and comfy. Light beige sofas with a table between them. The walls were painted a neutral linen color and several framed pictures were hung throughout the room. I walked around and looked at each of the pictures. Each of them was Brian's work. They were nothing like the drawings he did for tattoos. These were more like the kinds of pictures you would find in a gallery.

"These are amazing! When did you do them?" I asked.

"Well, ever since we've been back together I can't help but feel inspired." He winked at me. "You must be my muse."

I looked around the room again. "Whose place is this?"

"I was hoping it could be ours," he said timidly.

My eyes went wide. "Are you serious?"

Brian stepped in front of me and put his arms around my waist. "Shiloh, I want you all to myself. I know we've only been back together for a couple of months but I don't want to go to sleep at night or wake up in the morning without you in my arms." He kneeled down in front of me and my heart raced. Pulling a small black box from his pocket he opened it and I gasped. Nestled in the velvet was the most beautiful ring I had ever seen. It had a combination of small diamonds, sapphires and rubies surrounding a larger diamond in the center. The metal work was a series of intricate swirls with the stones set throughout. "Shiloh, I spent eight months without you. I don't ever want to go through that hell again. You are the air that I breathe. You make my life worth living. I want to spend everyday for the rest of our lives showing you how much I love you. Will you marry me?"

Once again Brian brought tears to my eyes. Only this time they were tears of joy.

"Yes. Yes I'll marry you," I said.

He placed the ring on my finger then wrapped his arms around me burying his face against my stomach.

"Thank god! I was afraid I was going to have to grovel."

I laughed and he looked up at me.

"I would've you know? Groveled?" He stood and took my hand. "Let me show you around the rest of the place. Starting with the master bedroom."

The tone of his voice told me we'd be in the bedroom for quite some time. He led me down the hall and into the bedroom. Once again I couldn't believe how amazing the view was. There was a big bed opposite the glass doors dressed with a fluffy white blanket and multiple colored pillows. Brian picked me up and carried me over to the bed. Taking his time he removed my shoes then my shirt and shorts. I lay on the bed with only my bra and panties on as he looked down on me with a combination of love and desire. He removed his clothes and joined me on the bed. He slowly ran his hands over my chest then down my stomach. When he reached my waist he slid my panties down over my legs then dropped them on the floor. Kneeling down between my legs he kissed my inner thighs softly. My body heated in anticipation. He slipped his hands under my hips before he buried his face between my legs. I nearly lost it when his tongue traced it's way around my clit. Brian knew exactly the right rhythm and pressure to make me go crazy. It was only a matter of minutes before he sent me spiraling into oblivion. As he made his way back up my body he removed my bra and took one of my nipples into his mouth, sucking it gently. He rolled the other nipple between his fingers. Currents jolted through me with every touch and I ran my fingers through his hair. His mouth traveled up my chest and neck leaving kisses along the way until he reached my mouth. Taking my tongue into his mouth he kissed me with sweetness while he slowly slid his hard length inside me. I gasped as he filled me up. The feeling of our bodies connected like that made my heart swell. We felt so right together. Our bodies moved slowly taking time to relish in the sensations. It was like a sensual dance. Brian pulled his mouth from mine and gazed down into my eyes. He placed his palm against my cheek and I could see the intensity of his love for me shining in his hazel eyes.

"I love you so much," he whispered.

"I love you, Brian," I returned.

Our eyes never shifted. We stared at each other as our rhythm became deeper. I could feel the orgasm building and growing below my belly. The hot, smooth skin sliding inside me, the tip of his cock pushing against that magical place inside over and over again had me speeding toward my climax until it crashed into me with a force that knocked my breath away.

"Brian! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!"

"That's it baby. You look so fucking beautiful when you come."

I looked at him as he took in a deep breath then let himself go. He gritted his teeth and the veins in his neck bulged.

"Oh fuck Shiloh!"

We lay quietly for a while but something nagged at the back of my mind. I knew it wouldn't change anything between us, but I needed to know.

"Brian?"

"Hmm?"

His hands were stroking my back slowly.

"Can I ask you something without you getting mad?"

His hands stopped and he looked down at me. "What is it?"

"You have to promise you won't get mad," I said.

He smiled. "Baby, you just agreed to become my wife before making love to me. There is nothing that could make me mad right now."

I sighed. "While we were apart did you ever..."

He laughed. Then he got serious. His fingers traced my cheek bone. "No never. From the first kiss I couldn't even imagine touching someone else. You've always been it for me. I haven't touched another woman and I never will. When I told you, you own my heart and soul I meant it."

Relief flooded me. Then his expression became curious.

"What about you?" he asked.

I hadn't expected that. "What!? Of course not!"

He laughed. "I'm just kidding, Shiloh. Besides, I have a feeling Hunter would've had my back if you tried to take a guy home." Amusement shown in his eyes. "Sonofabitch rode my ass about you for months."

"He did?"

"Yeah. He was a real pain in the ass there for a while." He became serious. "I think his timing was just off. Those first couple of months were the worst."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up bad memories. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"I made a promise to you a while back. I promised I would try to open up to you. Eight months without you has made me realize that even though it's scary to bear your soul to someone, it's much worse to lose the one you love. I won't risk that ever again."

I smiled up at him. "I wish I could've been there for you during all of that."

He kissed me. "Me too. But, that's my fault. Besides, maybe I needed to go through that to realize what's really important." He ran his hand through his hair. "You know, so much has changed in the past year. I mean, before you came along I was getting fucked up all the time, living like there was no tomorrow. And, I didn't care. But, you stepped into my world and made me see that life is worth something. Hell, you saved me, Shiloh."

I wiped the moisture from my eyes. "Why do you have to say things like that? It makes me get all sappy."

He chuckled. "I'm just being honest, baby." His hands wandered down to my butt and his eyes darkened. "But if you don't want to be sappy I can think of plenty of other things we can do."

I laughed as he pulled me on top of him and kissed me. There was no way we would ever get enough of each other.

### Chapter 24

Three months later...

Shiloh

I still couldn't believe that in less than a week I would be Mrs. Shiloh Curtis. I smiled to myself as I picked through the clothes hanging in my closet. Paul was throwing a party for us at his house tonight and I was trying to find something to wear. I stood in the closet with only a towel wrapped around me.

"We should skip the party and just spend the night in bed," Brian said from behind me as he wrapped his arms around my waist. His lips traveled over my bare shoulder sending chills over my entire body.

"As tempting as that sounds, we can't. This party is for us remember?" I turned my head to look at him my smile widening. "Besides, the shower we just took should be enough to hold us over until we get home."

"Baby, with you, it will never be enough," he whispered in my ear.

His hand moved down until it reached the edge of my towel then slid under it between my legs. I became putty. I leaned my head back against his shoulder. He simultaneously worked his fingers inside me while rubbing his thumb in circles over my clit. His mouth was doing intoxicating things to my neck. My hips moved against his hand involuntarily. I weaved my arms behind his neck and curled my fingers in his hair. I moaned as the heat between my thighs grew into an inferno. I could feel my muscles clenching as I barreled toward my climax. Brian's lips found mine just in time for me to cry out into his mouth. His arm tightened around my waist as my knees went wobbly. Brian pulled his fingers out of me and with a devilish gaze he proceeded to put them in his mouth and suck on them.

"Best fucking taste ever," he said.

Something about him enjoying the taste of my juices made me go wild. I turned and hopped up wrapping my legs around his waist. He grabbed his towel and threw it to the floor before doing the same with mine. An instant later he pushed my hips down until he was fully sheathed inside me. Our mouths made love to each other as if we were starving. He pushed my back against the wall and continued to pound into me. Every thrust sent shockwaves through me. It was only minutes before I was overcome with another bone melting orgasm. As my body succumbed to the intense pleasure Brian jerked violently his fingers digging into my hips as we both fell over the edge. Coming down from the exquisite sensations he rested his forehead on my shoulder, his breath washing over my chest in bursts.

"It just keeps getting better every time," he said. He looked up into my eyes. "You are so fucking amazing. I can't believe you're mine."

I kissed him tenderly. "I'm all yours," I promised.

### *****

I shouldn't have been surprised that things would turn ugly when Brian and Hunter joined a drinking game down in the basement. I was in the kitchen getting a fresh beer when Paul came in.

"So, next Saturday is the big day, huh?" He asked. His words were slurred and he weaved a little.

I smiled. "Yep."

He stood a little closer than would be considered normal. We were alone in the room. The way Paul eyed me like he had X-ray vision and was getting an indecent look at my body made me nervous. He licked his lips as his mouth formed a sneer. Paul had always been a little forward with me, but I blew it off. He knew I was with Brian so he usually kept his flirting pretty tame. I just figured it was a part of his personality that went along with the rock band image. He took a lock of my hair between his fingers and studied it.

"You know, it isn't too late to have one last fling before tying the knot," he said as he leaned closer.

"Thanks, but no thanks," I replied. "You're just drunk. I'm sure there are plenty of women here that would love to take you up on that offer."

His eyes darkened. "Are you completely oblivious? It's you I want. I've wanted you since the first night I met you."

I stood with my mouth open not knowing what to say. I watched as his face hardened.

"You deserve better than that loser. I could give you everything. You could have anything you want. What can Brian do for you? I know you come from money. I can offer you the lifestyle you deserve. What can he give you?"

I took a step back and lifted my chin. "His love is all I need."

Paul let out a loud laugh. "You really think Brian will love you forever? Sure he's probably infatuated for the time being, but Brian isn't the kind of guy to stick with one woman for life. He doesn't know the first thing about love or commitment. In a few years at best he'll be ready for a new ride and he'll leave you stranded. I'd be surprised if he hasn't been fucking everything on two legs since you've been together. And all that time you guys were split up. You really think he wasn't back to business as usual? You can't change someone as fucked up as he is."

Paul closed the distance between us and grabbed my face between his hands. Before I could move he pressed his lips against mine. I grabbed his wrists and tried to push him away but he was too strong. I slapped my hands against his chest while keeping my mouth firmly shut.

"What the fuck?!"

I heard Brian's voice just before he launched at Paul. He had Paul by the neck with his left hand while his right fist delivered blow after blow to Paul's face. Paul tried to hit back and managed to get one punch to Brian's cheek. Brian kept going at him with a fury that scared the shit out of me. I'd never seen him so angry. A few minutes later a couple of guys rushed into the kitchen. It took three of them to pull Brian off of Paul. Paul lurched forward intending to rush Brian. I ran toward Brian in an unwise movement just as Paul's fist was coming down toward Brian. A blinding pain split through my head as Paul's fist connected with my temple. I bent over, my hands flying to my face as the ground spun beneath me. Brian elbowed one of the guys holding him and rushed at Paul.

"Motherfucker!" I heard Brian shout. And then there was a lot of shuffling around. Big arms pulled me away from the fighting and I tried to pull away.

"Come on, Shiloh," I heard Hunter say. "Brian can hold his own."

I sat on the toilet in our condo while Hunter wet a washcloth and wrapped it around a plastic bag of ice. He pressed it gently against my cheek and I winced.

"Here, hold this to your cheek," Hunter said. "You'll probably have a nice bruise there in a couple of hours."

I looked up at Hunter. I couldn't get Paul's words out of my head. "Hunter?"

"Yeah."

"Do you think Brian has been faithful to me all this time?" I hated asking.

"Are you serious? Why would you even ask that?"

"Well, it's just that Paul said he'd be surprised if Brian hadn't been sleeping around behind my back. And then we were apart all those months."

Hunter sighed. "Listen, Shiloh. Paul is a dick. Everybody knows Brian's reputation with women. He never boasted about it but he also never denied it. He was always straight forward with the women he slept with. He always made sure they knew it was only a one night thing. But, after you came along he didn't look twice at other women. And he's been blatantly obvious about his feelings for you. I know Brian better than anyone and if he says you're the one then that's all there is to it. You're it for him."

I smiled. "Sometimes it's hard to be with him because he's so gorgeous. He could have anyone. I see how women look at him."

Hunter looked at me incredulously. "Have you ever looked in a mirror? Fuck, Shiloh, if you weren't my sister I'd have fallen all over myself trying to hook up with you. You don't know how many guys are lucky to be standing right now for ogling you or how many times I've had to keep Brian from pummeling a guy for staring at your ass."

"Really?"

"Uh yeah. You're gorgeous, sis." He chuckled. "You should have seen Brian's face when he first laid eyes you. His tongue practically dropped out of his mouth. And the way he looks at you...well, let's just say you've got the boy's heart wrapped in your palm."

"Thanks. I just don't want him to have any regrets, ya know?"

"Oh he's gonna have regrets tomorrow, but none of them will have to do with you."

"What do you mean?" I was genuinely confused.

"I mean he's probably going to have one hell of a hangover and I'm picking him up right after his arraignment, so he should be in a pretty foul mood."

"His arraignment? What are you talking about?"

"Somebody called the cops. They threw him in jail for assault." He shrugged. "The charges won't stick. Paul isn't stupid enough to follow through with it. It would hurt his image if the tabloids found out he got his ass kicked. You know, the whole bad boy rocker thing."

"How do you know Brian's in jail?"

"He called me. I think he's worried you'll be upset with him."

I shook my head and smirked. "He was pretty bad ass," I admitted.

"Yeah. I remember him on the first day he came to my school. Got in a fight within the first hour of being there. That's how we became friends." He laughed. "He beat the shit out of the football team's line backer. He's calmed down a lot since then, though."

Hunter put his hand out and I took it then stood up keeping the ice pack on the side of my face. Maybe it was just the drama of the night but I still felt nervous.

"Hunter? Do you think Brian will get bored with me?"

He sighed and turned to face me. "Shiloh, Brian isn't our dad. When he loves, he loves. There is no gray area for him. While you guys were apart he practically checked out. I've never seen him so bad off. He was a fucking zombie." He led me to the bed and I sat down. "Wait here. I want to show you something." He came back a few minutes later holding several sketch pads and handed them to me. I knew Brian kept his art supplies in the spare room, but I had never seen these. "Take a look."

I opened the first one. On every page there was a drawing of me. I stared at them in disbelief.

"Every one of them is like that," Hunter said. "You're all he could think about all those months."

Each of the drawings looked as though he had taken careful consideration of every single detail. It was as if he had memorized every one of my expressions and transferred them to the paper. He had captured the subtleties of each emotion perfectly. I turned a page and my face got hot. There was a picture of me lying naked. My eyelids looked heavy and my mouth was parted open. At the bottom of the page was the word 'perfection'. I quickly closed the book. Hunter gathered up the books and put them back in the other room.

"Now do you believe me?" Hunter asked when he returned.

I nodded.

Hunter came and sat by me on the bed. "Get some sleep. In a week you become Shiloh Curtis." He winked. "If I didn't think Brian was one hundred percent in love with you I never would have agreed to give you away to him. So, stop worrying. You guys belong together."

Hunter left the room and I curled up on Brian's side of the bed. I could smell his scent on the pillows so I took in a deep breath. I fell asleep with the images of Brian's drawings floating through my mind.

### Chapter 25

Brian

"Whoa, man. You look like shit," Hunter said as I walked outside.

I gave him my middle finger with one hand as I shielded my eyes from the ridiculously bright sun. The judicial complex would have to be paved in white fucking concrete. The reflection of the sun off the bright cement was piercing my skull.

"That's no way to treat a friend," he said lightly.

"Whatever," I replied. "Thanks for picking me up."

He handed me a pair of sun glasses and I put them on. Once I could see again I looked up at Hunter.

"Is she really pissed?" I asked.

Hunter laughed. "Nah. I think she was actually a little turned on, to be quite honest. What the hell set you off like that anyway?"

I growled. "Fucking Paul kissed Shiloh."

"What an idiot. Not to piss you off anymore than you already are, but he also said some shit to her that got her nervous."

I stopped and faced him. My fists clenched. "What the fuck did he say?"

"Something about you cheating on Shiloh the entire time you guys have been together. And then hooking up all the time while you were apart. But, don't worry I talked to her."

I was seething with rage. "What did you say to her?"

"I told her when you love someone you're all in. I let her know that when you guys were apart you were a fucking miserable zombie."

I got in Hunter's car. "I should've killed that prick last night."

"Then you would be in prison and not marrying Shiloh next weekend."

I couldn't argue that no matter how much I wanted to twist Paul's neck until it snapped. He'd been eyeing Shiloh from day one. There were more than a few occasions that I'd had to keep from knocking his ass out.

"You want to stop by the apartment and get cleaned up before you go home?" Hunter asked.

"No. I need to see Shiloh. Is she hurt?"

"Just a little bruising. She's okay."

I gritted my teeth. One more reason Paul should consider himself lucky to be breathing. When I saw his fist make contact with her face it had taken four guys to keep me from going off on Paul with everything I had.

The instant Hunter's car stopped in front of the condo I was out the door and heading inside. I slammed the door behind me and ran down the hall.

"Shiloh!" I called out.

She stepped out of the bedroom and the relief of seeing her calmed the rage only for it to come back full force when I saw the dark bruises on the side of her face.

"Oh my god, Brian!" She rushed to me. Her fingers touched my cheek lightly. "Are you okay?"

I grabbed her in my arms and buried my face against her neck. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I never thought he would try anything with you. Please tell me you're alright."

"I'm fine. I was more worried about you."

I stepped back remembering the condition of my clothes. "Let me go get cleaned up."

She took my hand and led me to the bathroom. "Come on. I'll help."

She stripped my clothes off and started the shower before undressing herself. Any anger I had dissolved the moment I looked at her beautiful naked body. She pushed me toward the shower closing the door behind us.

"Stop staring at me like that," she said.

"I can't help it. You're fucking gorgeous."

"Turn around," she commanded. "I'm going to wash your back."

I did as she said and leaned my forehead against the tiles. She gasped as she saw the bruises on my arms and shoulders.

"It's not that bad," I assured her.

"But, they're all over you!"

"Yeah, that happens when four guys take you down to the ground while you're struggling."

Honestly, I felt like I'd been run over by a freight train, but I wasn't going to give her anything more to worry about. I let out a deep sigh as she ran the soapy sponge over my back. After a few minutes of Shiloh washing my body I finally relaxed. When she finished I washed her before we got out and dried off. My cock was standing at full attention and I wanted to be inside her, but I needed to talk to her first. I hated that Paul had given her any reason to doubt me and I needed to clear that shit up.

I pulled her to the bed and lay next to her. Propping myself up on my elbow I looked into her eyes. I needed her to see everything I felt for her. I needed her to know that since she came into my life it was only her. I needed her to know without a doubt that there was no room in my heart or my bed for anyone but her.

"Brian? Is something wrong?" The worry in her eyes was heartbreaking.

I ran my thumb along her jaw gently. "Hunter told me the things Paul said to you about me. He said you were upset by it. I want you to know that since the first time I kissed you there has never and will never be anyone else for me. The months we were apart I couldn't think of anything but you. I need you to know that and believe it. I promise you I will never want anyone else. There is no one who could ever take me from you. And I will never get tired of seeing your face every day or kissing your lips." I kissed her softly. "Or making love to you." My hand went to her hip and pulled her closer so that our bodies were together, skin to skin. I rolled her back and lowered myself between her thighs. As I pushed myself inside her slowly I was overcome with how much I loved her. "I love you so much, baby," I whispered. "I want you. I need you. It's only you for the rest of my life."

I stared down into her eyes as a tear trickled from the corner. I could see the love she felt for me and I was humbled and grateful and elated all at the same time. I made love to her slowly and tenderly savoring every touch. She was my world. She was my everything.

### *****

I stood staring out at the small crowd. Every single nerve in my body was lit up. The anticipation was building to a point that I was ready to jump from the platform I stood upon and run to the tent where Melanie was helping Shiloh get ready. Even Vegas was sounding like a viable option at that point. A moment later I saw Melanie step out of the tent and nod at Hunter. He gave her a quick kiss and went inside. Music started to play and Melanie walked toward me. She gave me a wink and smiled. She held a small bouquet in her hands. I could see why Hunter liked her so much. She was beautiful and fun. But, I was waiting for the most exquisite woman in the world. When Melanie reached the arched trellis she took her place on the other side from me. The music changed and I held my breath as the tent opened. Hunter stepped out with Shiloh on his arm. My heart stopped. Shiloh stood wearing a simple white gown that flowed along her curves until it fanned out around her feet. Her shoulders were bare and her hair was pulled up with a few strands loosely curled around her face. And, oh her face. Her perfect lips curved into my favorite smile when her eyes met mine. The smile that effortlessly lit up my universe. Her cheeks were a delicate shade of pink and her eyes sparkled. There was nothing else in the world that could even come close to being as stunningly beautiful as she was right then. She walked gracefully next to her brother as if she was floating. The sound of the waves and music in the background were drowned out. All I could focus on was her. She glowed.

As they approached I finally let out my breath slowly. Hunter kissed Shiloh on the cheek then put her hands in mine. He gave me nod and pat my shoulder before taking his place beside me. I only saw him from the corner of my eye because I couldn't stop staring at Shiloh. Through the entire ceremony our eyes were locked on each other. We said our vows and Melanie handed the rings to each of us. As I slid the ring onto Shiloh's finger professing my undying love for her I couldn't get over the fact that this perfect woman was mine for the rest of our lives. Despite all the horrible things I'd gone through in my life I was loved by the most incredible woman in the world. My eyes misted when I heard her say the two words that would make me the luckiest and happiest man on the planet.

"I do," she said.

"I now pronounce you man and wife," the officiate declared. "You may now kiss the bride."

I leaned down and placed my hands on her cheeks as my lips met hers. My first kiss with my wife. Her arms came around my shoulders and I slipped mine around her waist pulling her against me. Our lips moved together slowly in a sensual dance that made my head spin. I embraced her tighter as our tongues met. I would never get enough. The world around us faded away and in that moment there was nothing but the two of us. Never in my life could I have imagined that the love that we shared was possible. But, here we were and I loved this woman with every ounce of my being.

Hunter cleared his throat behind me. "You gonna strip her down and go at it right here?" he whispered.

Shiloh and I laughed against each other's mouths before pulling away. Leave it to Hunter to break up the moment. I turned to him.

"Nah. I'll save that for later on tonight," I replied. I couldn't keep the grin off my face.

"Well, if you two are done making out in front of everyone we have a party waiting," Hunter said.

The wedding was held on the little stretch of beach where Shiloh and I had our first date. Hunter insisted on providing a catered reception as a wedding present. There was a large tent set up on the sand with a fully stocked bar (of course), a band and all kinds of food. Hunter kicked off the party by announcing Shiloh and I before music played for our first dance. I took her in my arms and we moved to the music.

"You know, you look pretty hot in a tux," she said.

"Oh yeah? Well, I can't even begin to tell you how beautiful you are. There are no words to describe it."

She smiled. "Thank you."

I gazed at her intensely. "No, thank you, Mrs. Curtis."

Her laugh made my blood run hot.

"How long do we have to stay here?" I asked.

She shook her head. "You are completely incorrigible!"

"I can't help it. You are so sexy and you smell so good." I kissed the silky skin of her shoulder. "And, your skin is so soft. I told you I'll never get enough of you."

"Well, you'll have to wait a while. We should enjoy this. We'll have plenty of time to celebrate privately later."

I groaned as I kissed her neck.

### Epilogue

Three years later...

Brian

Music blared from my earbuds into my ears. I had been going at it for hours, scrubbing every surface until any trace of dirt or dust had been completely eliminated. The hard wood floors shined as the sun broke through the windows. The walls were freshly painted. Hunter, Matt and Greg were back at the condo helping Shiloh pack the last of our things. More likely, Shiloh was giving them orders and they were doing all the work. At least I hoped so. Our baby was due any day and I'd given Hunter clear instructions not to let Shiloh lift anything heavy. Our baby. I still had a hard time believing that soon I would be a father. We decided we needed to buy a house with a baby on the way. Hunter was going to move into the condo. We found an old house not far from the condo that needed some work. We were able to get it for a good price considering it was on the water. Shiloh finally talked me into letting her use some of her trust fund to pay the down payment. Ever since we found out she was pregnant and got the house we had been working to get it fixed up. It was almost ready and the move was planned for tomorrow. Just in the nick of time because Shiloh was ready to pop. I could still remember the day Shiloh gave me the news that she was pregnant.

### *****

I had just come home from the shop after working late and she sat motionless at one of the counter stools. Only the kitchen light was on. My first reaction was to run over to her and ask her what was wrong. I didn't even notice what she held in her hand until she looked up at me and held up the little stick. She didn't have to say a word. I've seen enough commercials to know what it was. My eyes darted to the little white plastic and a light pink plus sign practically screamed at me like a neon sign. I stared at it for a few moments before I looked up into her eyes. She looked unsure as if she didn't know how I would react. Hell, I didn't even know how I would react. But, then everything seemed to fall into place in an instant. I grabbed the stick from her fingers, tossed it on the counter and pulled her from her seat wrapping my arms around her and spinning her around while laying kisses all over her face. I grinned like a fool.

Shiloh laughed. "I take it this means you're happy?"

I set her on her feet and gazed down at her. In that moment she was even more beautiful than ever. "Baby, I'm not going to lie, it's scary as shit. But, I couldn't be happier."

That smile that made my whole body melt flashed across her face. "I'm so relieved. I know we've talked about one day having kids, but we never really decided when. I wasn't sure if you were ready."

"With you, I'm ready for anything." And I was. I dropped to my knees and lifted the front of her shirt. Her flat stomach gave no indication that there was a life growing inside her. A tiny being that she and I created. I slid my hands to her hips and pulled her closer placing my lips on her smooth skin. Her fingers threaded through my hair softly. An overwhelming sense of love and protectiveness consumed me. We were going to be a family. I had no concept of what that was, but I knew that Shiloh would make sure I didn't fuck it up.

As if she could read my mind she said, "You're going to be a wonderful father, Brian."

I let out a long sigh that caused chill bumps to raise on her skin. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," she replied.

### *****

Shiloh was working part time for a community outreach center helping counsel women who had escaped an abusive relationship. It didn't pay well, but Shiloh loved the work. The shop was doing so well that Hunter and I decided to open another one in a different part of town. We decided not to find out the sex of the baby. Shiloh thought it would make things more interesting. The first part of her pregnancy had been not so fun, but once the morning sickness went away Shiloh seemed to glow. And, much to my delight, she became a nymphomaniac. I was working one Saturday afternoon when Shiloh came into the shop. I had just finished up with a client and was cleaning up before closing. I looked up when she walked in and my heart stopped.

"Is something wrong? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?" I asked in panic. I was across the room and standing right in front of her in seconds.

She reached up and put her arms around me then leaned up on her tiptoes until her mouth crashed into mine.

"I need you now," she said breathlessly.

Shiloh shoved me back until I was forced to sit on one of my work tables. Her hands flew to the bottom of my shirt and yanked it up until she had it over my head. She tossed it to the floor then went for my fly. She had my jeans unbuttoned and my zipper down in record time. I lifted my ass so she could pull my pants down. Far be it from me to keep a pregnant woman from her craving. Besides, the way she was taking control and that cute little sundress she was wearing had me hard as a rock instantly. She brought her knees up onto the table straddling me. I lifted her dress. No fucking underwear! I groaned as she pushed her hips down and took me all the way inside her in one thrust.

"Fuck Shiloh!" I couldn't help crying out at how good her hot wet pussy felt.

Shiloh wrapped her arms around my shoulders and took my mouth with hers as her hips moved up and down wildly. We had plenty of passionate sex but I was seeing a side of her that was new and it turned me on so much I didn't know if I could hold on. With a will power I didn't know I had I forced myself to keep control. Obviously my woman needed release and I was determined to give it to her. Her breathing became rough as she thrust harder and faster. I could feel her quivering inside, clenching me harder.

"Yeah, baby. That's it. Come for me."

I reached between us and pressed my finger to her tight little nub. Her back arched and she came apart screaming my name as her hot juices poured over my cock. All will power left me and I joined her in bliss as I gave one final thrust into her sweet depths. I pulled her close until our breathing somewhat returned to normal. I leaned my head back and looked up into her face. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were glazed.

I smiled. "What was that all about?"

She laughed. "I don't know. I was sitting at home and all of a sudden I had to have you inside me. It was crazy."

"Believe me I'm not complaining. Any time you need me you know I'm here for you."

She raised an eyebrow. "How noble of you."

My semi-hard cock raised back up to attention inside her. "I wouldn't want my woman to go without her needs being met."

I flipped her over the table and hiked her dress up exposing her perfectly round ass and smooth back before entering her again. She let out a gasp as I plunged deep inside her. If it was hard and fast that she needed I was more that happy to give it to her.

"Tell me what you need," I said. "What does my baby need?"

"Fuck me hard, Brian. I need you hard."

"Yes ma'am."

I slammed into her over and over until she screamed out as her body went over the edge again. I followed right behind her. If this was what we had in store for the next few months I was fucking thrilled.

### *****

Putting away the last of the cleaning supplies my dick was hard just remembering that day and the many others she came to my shop. I closed the little closet and nearly jumped out of my skin when a hand landed on my shoulder. I turned and found myself staring into the wide eyes of Hunter. He looked frantic and pissed. I yanked the earbuds out of my ears.

"What the fuck, man!" he yelled at me.

"What? What's the hell is going on? You scared the shit out of me! Where's Shiloh?" My heart was hammering in my chest.

"I've been trying to call you for the past half hour. Shiloh's in labor. We've gotta go!"

"Where is she?!" I started running for the door.

"Out in the car. Come on!"

"You brought her here instead of the hospital? Are you crazy?"

"She wouldn't go without you and you weren't answering your phone. What else was I supposed to do?"

I couldn't argue. I ran out to the car. Shiloh was sitting in the passenger seat. As panicked as I felt she looked calm and collected. I opened the door and she stepped out. I helped her into the back seat then sat next to her.

"Are you alright? Are you in pain? What can I do?" The questions stumbled out of my mouth.

She nodded. "I'm okay right now. The contractions are still about five minutes apart."

Hunter checked his watch as he got behind the wheel. "Which means you have about one minute until the next one."

My eyes went wide. I struggled to remember what we learned in our labor classes. I needed to get a grip so I could help Shiloh. I watched as her face morphed into a frown. Her hands went to her bulging belly and she started to breathe deep and slow. Tiny beads of sweat popped out on her forehead as she closed her eyes. Hunter drove toward the hospital. Shiloh whimpered and I took one of her hands in mine. She gripped it hard.

"I'm here baby. You can do this," I whispered into her ear.

"Brian? Brian! It hurts."

My heart was breaking. I knew labor was going to be painful but seeing her like that twisted my heart. I felt completely helpless. There was nothing I could do to stop her pain.

"Just hold onto me, baby. Squeeze my hand." She already had a death grip on it but whatever she needed to get through the contraction I would do for her. Broken fingers could be fixed. Her other hand reached for me and I grabbed it so she could hold on tight. "Hurry up Hunter!"

"We're almost there," he shouted back.

He pulled up to the hospital doors just as Shiloh's contraction started to fade. I pulled her out of the car and carried her through the doors.

"My wife is in labor," I called out to the woman at the front counter.

She grabbed the phone and made a call then directed us to the third floor. I headed into an elevator and pushed the button.

Shiloh looked up at me. "I can walk you know."

I shook my head. "No way."

A look of amusement in her eyes she said, "Are you nervous?"

Great. Now she was picking on me. "Fuck yeah I'm nervous!"

She laughed and put her hand on my chest. "That's so adorable."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm glad you're enjoying this."

The elevator opened and we were met by several nurses.

"She's already preregistered, so we have a room ready," one of them informed us. "Follow me."

She led us to a room that was decorated like a hotel and nothing like the room I was in when I had my accident. I guess having a baby warranted special treatment. I set Shiloh on the bed and the nurse immediately began checking her vital signs. A few minutes later the midwife arrived just as another contraction took over. I climbed in the bed next to Shiloh and she pulled me into her arms with a grip that left me unable to breathe. Her hands fisted behind my back gripping my shirt. I could see the midwife looking at her watch while the nurse stood behind her giving us the 'awww' look. I don't know what other couples did during labor but my wife wanted us to be close and that's the way it would be. She made me promise months ago that I would stick to her like glue while she was in labor. As the contraction went away Shiloh's grip on me loosened.

"I need to check to see how far dilated you are," she said to Shiloh.

She nodded and I moved off the bed. Shiloh never let go of my hand as she shifted into position and the midwife started her examination. All of a sudden Shiloh's hand tightened painfully around mine and she let out a low groan.

"Another one already?" I asked.

She nodded. Her face was scrunched up in pain and a tear fell from her eye.

"Remember your breathing," I whispered moving as close as possible to her. "You can do this baby. You're doing great."

Sweat poured down her face and I used my shirt to wipe it away. Her eyes were clenched shut and she was focusing on keeping her breathing slow and deep. The midwife finished her exam.

"She's moving along fast. She almost eight centimeters dilated." She turned to the nurse. "Let's get everything set up. I have a feeling it won't be long before she needs to push." The nurse nodded and left the room.

The contraction seemed to go on forever but Shiloh rode it out. I had no idea what she was feeling but I watched her as if she was my hero. At the same time every second of pain she endured was ripping my heart out.

"Are you sure you don't want something for pain?" I asked her.

"No. I can do this."

The nurse returned and rearranged the bed preparing for the birthing process. Holy shit! It was almost time! A moment later two more nurses came in the room wheeling a small plastic bassinet with a lamp over it. That's where they would put my baby after he or she was born. This was actually happening. Before I could register another thought Shiloh was clutching my arm tightly. It had been less than a minute. A guttural moan came from her throat and she leaned forward pressing her face into my shoulder. Her teeth clamped down and I had to force myself not to shout out in pain. That was going to leave a mark.

"Get it out! Get it out!" she screamed.

The midwife checked her again. "She's ready." She helped Shiloh put her feet in stirrups before the next contraction started. "When you feel the next contraction I want you to push okay?"

Shiloh nodded. I climbed onto the bed behind her and massaged her stomach. I could feel the movement inside. Her muscles began to tighten and I braced myself for whatever body part Shiloh would crush next. Her hands clamped onto my thighs.

"Okay, Shiloh push!" the midwife said.

Shiloh leaned forward and I braced myself against her back for support. I steadied my legs as she used them to pull her body forward.

"I can see the crown," the midwife announced. "You're almost there."

Shiloh slumped back against me. A nurse brought a wet cloth and I placed it on Shiloh's forehead.

"You're doing so good baby. I love you so much. You are so strong and beautiful." All I could do was whisper loving words to her.

She grabbed my legs again and we repeated the process once more.

"That's good, Shiloh. Just a little more. Push just a little harder."

She leaned further grunting and straining until something gave way and she started to sag back.

"Keep pushing, Shiloh," the midwife instructed. "The head is out. Just a little more to get the shoulders through."

"You can do this, baby. It's almost over," I reassured her.

She nodded and I saw the determination in her face. She lunged forward and I gave her all the support I could. Her teeth were gritted and her body was strung taut. Then we heard it. Crying. A tiny little voice was crying. At the end of the bed there was a lot of shuffling around. A nurse brought a blanket over and a moment later the midwife stood with a small bundle in her hands.

As she came over to us she said, "You have a baby boy."

She handed the baby – my son – to Shiloh. I peered over her shoulder and stared in awe at the sight of this tiny little boy in my wife's arms. A tsunami of emotion crashed over me. I tilted my head to the side and looked at the most beautiful woman in the world. I wrapped my arms around my family. My family. Tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I love you so much, Shiloh. You are the most incredible woman. You brought this perfect little person into the world. We are a family. I love you."

She turned her head and I placed my hand on her cheek. I leaned in and kissed her slowly and tenderly. No matter what hell I'd had to travel through I had finally found heaven. Holding my wife and son I knew that I was complete.

### The End

Thank you for reading my book. If you enjoyed it, won't you please take a moment to leave me a review at your favorite retailer?

Thanks!

Freia Hagen

### About the Author

Freia Hagen currently lives in Columbia, South Carolina with her long time boyfriend, two dogs and two cats. She works as a registered nurse caring for geriatric patients. She has one daughter. Her favorite hobby – of course – is reading. She enjoys spending time with her boyfriend, cooking and writing. Some of her favorite genres are paranormal romance and contemporary romance.

Other titles by Freia Hagen:

The Guardian

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