From inadvertent swearing to peeing on people,
the Planet Dolan crew re-enact some of the
best true stories from our subreddit about
more of the funniest things we’ve seen little
kids do. I’m Pringle and today I’ll be
your narrator.
Number 10 was submitted by mrbenzememe Emojie
Emojie went to a restaurant with his friends
one day. One of his friends brought his 5
or 6 year old kid. Things were pretty chill
until the little dude looked straight into
his dad’s eyes and said, "I’m going to
say the n-word". The kid’s parents were
concerned and tried to hush the kid before
he could start spewing racial slurs… but
they were too late. The kid took his shirt
off and started screaming, “NIPPLE! NIPPLE!
NIPPLE!”, while running around the restaurant.
His parents were both relieved and very embarrassed
that their child was screaming ‘nipple’
in a burger joint. Emojie thinks that it’s
better than the actual n-word.
Number 9 was submitted by JoshuaCaldwell MKyleM
Back when MKyleM was in preschool, a kid brought
in a video recorder to school for show and
tell. The video was of his mom and dad "wrestling".
The teacher was mortified, and the kid got
in trouble. When the parents got there, they
talked to the teacher. And as they were talking,
MKyleM heard the parents go, "Why did you
take the recorder and show them that?!" The
kid said, "My friend said his brother told
him wrestling was fake, so I showed him it
isn't fake." MKyleM still can't stop laughing
at that memory.
Number 8 was submitted by Starperior Tolop
One time, while Tolop’s parents went into
a shop to buy something, he was stuck waiting
outside. While he was waiting, Tolop saw a
kid, probably about 4 or 5, crossing his legs
while he jumping up and down, clearly wanting
to go to the bathroom. Tolop could see the
boy’s mother talking to someone and, while
she was talking, the boy was looking around
for a bathroom. He then saw a shop that was
selling training toilets for kids who are
just learning how to go to the toilet. The
boy ran up to one of them, pulled down his
trousers, sat down and took a shit in public.
Everyone was looking at him, with his mother
looking in embarrassment while Tolop tried
to contain his laughter. The mother ended
up cleaning the shit out of the toilet and
paying for it.
Number 7 was submitted by ZeeDee777 CivilSpider
When CivilSpider’s little brother was 3,
his dad invited over one of his friends. His
dad's friend decided to bring over his girlfriend,
who had gigantic boobs. They were all in the
living room just hanging out when CivilSpider’s
little brother decided to walk over to the
girlfriend, who was sitting on the couch,
and poke her boobs as he stated, "You have
big boobs!" Everyone was silent as the girlfriend
agreed. "Yes, I do have big boobs!" she said.
Everyone was wetting themselves as they laughed
at what had just happened. CivilSpider’s
dad said through his tears of laughter, "Dang!
Every time I do that, I get slapped!" His
little brother just sat there, looking confused.
That was a great night.
Number 6 was submitted by Raspberry_Rabbit
Honeybits
When Honeybits was in second grade, she saw
these two kids in her class get into a fight
during gym class. When they kept yelling at
each other, the teacher sent one of them to
the corner all the way on the other side of
the room. They continued to make faces at
each other from across the room, which wasn't
so bad until the one in the corner of the
room flipped off the one sitting with the
class. This resulted in the kid sitting with
Honeybits and the rest of the class running
over to him. They started hitting each other,
and the teacher made the whole class go into
the hall while she broke up the fight. Then
she took the two out to the hall with the
rest of the class. One of the kids told the
teacher, "He called me a jack butt!" to which
the other kid replied, "I didn't call you
a jack butt, I called you a jack ASS!" The
teacher yelled at him for swearing, and they
both went to the principal’s office and
got suspended. Honeybits doesn’t remember
exactly what they were fighting about, just
that it was something really stupid. The fact
that this is the way it ended was hysterical
to her.
Number 5 was submitted by HarleyQuinnClown
Pandora
One day when Pandora was babysitting her three
cousins, with the youngest one about three.
They were playing with her ‘My Little Pony”
toys when, out of nowhere, Pandora’s youngest
cousin screamed, "Ah, you hit me in my scrotum".
Pandora just looked at her and started laughing
her ass off. Her little cousin just looked
at her, clearly wondering what she was laughing
at.
Number 4 was submitted by theorangehorns Doopie
Doopie was sitting next to a friend at the
walk-in clinic. Her friend was very ill and
had asked her to drive her there. The waiting
room was rather full, and they had been waiting
for a few minutes, when she started talking
about how nauseous she was. Before Doopie
could get up and get her a vomit bag that
they hand out, her friend ended up puking
on the floor. No more than a few seconds later,
a young kid seated next to her went, "PUDDLE!"
and started stomping around in the puke. His
mom seemed absolutely miffed, but Doopie and
her friend had to fight to contain their laughter.
Number 3 was submitted by StevenDxD Dolan
One day, Dolan was home alone and playing
Team Fortress 2. Hours passed by and he opened
the window because he needed fresh air. Suddenly,
he saw a cute little girl in a dress. She
looked 5 years old, but he couldn’t see
her parents. Then she pulled out a box with
something written on it. She pulled out a
6 inch dildo and began hitting the ground
with it. Dolan started laughing and wanted
to record it but didn’t because his batteries
were dead. After that, she went home. He still
sees her when he’s outside and still laughs
about it to this day.
Number 2 was submitted by Fruitbatninja Melissa
Melissa once took her sons to the fair. Her
youngest was 4 and he had to go to the bathroom
very badly. They got out of the ride line
and went to the port-a-potty. There was a
really long line there and he was doing the
potty dance. She scanned the row of port-a-potties,
looking for a break in the lines, when she
suddenly felt wetness on her leg. Melissa
looked down, and her 4 year old had his pants
pulled down around his ankles and was peeing
on her leg. People were laughing and pointing,
and one old lady said, "When ya gotta go,
ya gotta go" before patting his head. Melissa
shook her leg off as best she could and got
some toilet paper to clean up a bit. She just
laughed and shrugged it off. That night at
bedtime, he said, "Sorry I pee-peed on you
mommy, I seened a doggy peepee on a tree and
I couldn't hold it anymore." Melissa laughed
so hard she got a stomach ache. Kids… gotta
love ‘em.
Number 1 – What was the funniest thing I’ve
ever seen 
a 
little kid do?
Huge thanks for the folks over on our Planet
Dolan subreddit for submitting their stories.
We have a question for you: “What was the
worst thing you've ever had a babysitter do?”
Let us know in the reddit page linked below
and you might be featured in 
a future countdown.
