 
### Primani

### By Laurie Olerich

### Smashwords Edition

### Copyright 2013 Laurie Olerich

### All Rights Reserved

### Discover other titles by Laurie Olerich!

### The Primani Series (includes the Lost Soul Trilogy and standalone titles)

### The Lost Soul Trilogy:

Primani

Call the Lightning

Stone Angels

### Standalone Titles in the Primani Series:

Broken Souls

Darkness Calling

Saol Mates

Daddy's Little Demon Slayer

### The Demons After Dark Series:

Vanek

Benn

Koivu

Derick (Coming in 2018)

### This book is available in print at most online retailers.

### Smashwords Edition License Notes

### This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Primani (priman'i) n. [Latin]: Soldiers of the First Legion

# Prologue:

ANCIENT OAK TREES LOOMED like sentinels standing watch above the rolling hills. In summer, they would be majestic and beautiful. In March, they were skeletal against the dark clouds and dead grass. It was cold and gloomy—a good day for a funeral, I guess. If you're into dark and creepy, this was perfect.

Marc was waiting for me. He'd shown up in black pants and a jacket he must've borrowed from his father. Like a little kid playing dress up, he seemed awkward and uncomfortable, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. At least he was here. We hadn't seen each other since the day my world ended. He'd been the one to drag me away from my mother's body and hold me together while we waited for the police.

As the service got started, I stood between Marc and my long-distance father, surveying the crowd and doing my best to stay calm. A lot of people lined up around the casket in support of our family and in remembrance of the woman who'd so briefly touched their lives. My mother's best friend, Billie, was quietly crying into a tissue. Her boyfriend held her upright by the elbows. Her eyes were shattered. Did I look like that? Is that how everyone sees me right now? I carefully pulled my face into a blank mask. Better.

The service dragged on forever. Reverend Vaselli droned. I'm sure he talked about what a great life Mom had had and how many people would miss her. I'm sure he talked about Heaven and angels and God's mercy. The reason I'm sure he talked about these things is because that's what ministers do, right? The truth is I stopped listening the second he started talking. Frozen as a statue, I stood ramrod straight, thinking of anything else to block out the words. If I listened, if I _heard_ , if I _looked_ , I would implode. I would lose control. I would cry like a baby in front of all these people. No. That was _not_ something I wanted to do. My grief should be private. I needed to be dignified, strong. I was screaming inside, but my face was blank, so painfully blank. My teeth ached from clenching—my jaw throbbed with tension—my eyes blazed with unshed tears. Would he not hurry up? How much did he really need to say?

I stared off into the trees, watching their bony arms claw at the gray sky. My mind wandered to the highway barely visible over a ridge. The faint sounds of moving cars drifted on the breeze. Where were those people going? Were they on their way to work now? Were they going to the store? Running errands? Normal things . . . what was _my_ normal now? And still, the reverend talked . . .

After an eternity, I heard him say, ". . . dust to dust. Amen."

Everyone echoed the words. _Amen_. Amen, indeed. I placed a single yellow rose on the casket. It was her favorite. My hand shook so hard I curled my fingers into a fist, nails gouging crescents. Damn. Oh, Mom . . . Why? Why _you_? The screaming in my head beat against my throat demanding release, demanding a voice. A tear rolled down my frozen cheek, a trigger to open the dam. I leaned against the casket, willing the tears to stop, letting my hair veil my face, silently saying goodbye to the most important person in my life.

# Chapter 1: Life and Death

IF THIS WAS HEAVEN, it was a major disappointment. Where was everybody? Hello? Anybody? I'm freezing my butt off over here . . . _anyone_?

Silence.

Wrapping my arms around my chest, I rubbed them for warmth. Wasn't being dead supposed to be, uh, more comfortable? I mean, really, dying was bad enough, wasn't it? The afterlife was supposed to be rainbows and sunshine . . . and warmth—glorious warmth. Looking around again, I sighed long and hard.

Well, this place sucked. There wasn't anything here besides me standing in an empty white space. Could it be any worse? In response, the Keepers of Paradise tossed a handful of heavy snow down on my head. Really? I tucked my chin and huddled in the blizzard. After a minute or so, I saw a faint light. The glow coalesced into a golden ray that speared the fog to illuminate a path.

It was so pretty . . . so pure.

_Stupid bitch! You ruined everything_.

Oh, my God! Where was he? Where was _Scott_?

My eyelids burned. The sensation drew me from the medicated sleep I swam in. Like the sun popping out from a cloud bank, the sudden brilliant light heated my skin. By the time I blinked the room into focus, it was gone. I peered between my bandages, but there was no other light. The hospital room was dark with the exception of the dim radiance of the machines sitting near my bed. Huh. I _thought_ I saw a light . . .

A nurse bustled into the room when she noticed my eyes were open. Cocking her head, she chided, "All right Miss Mica, what are you doing up? You were sleeping a minute ago."

Her name tag read _Lillian_. She was an older woman, with a healthy rack and several braids pulled back in a ponytail. She had a motherly way about her that made me feel better.

I cleared my throat and reassured her, "I'm okay. I woke up hungry, though." I gestured at the IV bag, and added, "This isn't doing it for me."

She smiled, and muttered, "Mm hmm," as she read my chart and checked my vitals. She asked me about my pain and other official nurse questions.

Yes, I was feeling better. Well, I didn't feel _dead_ now, so I guess that was _better_. Yes, I'm still feeling some pain. Was she kidding me? I was one big bandage! Everything hurt if I moved. I couldn't take a normal breath without pain. Did I want more pain meds? Well, of course I did! This woman was hilarious. I snorted out a small chuckle which hurt my nose. I ended up laughing and gasping in pain at the same time. Bless Lillian, she stuck a needle in my IV, and the pain went away in a warm wave of bliss. She was awesome. I told her I loved her—right before the room went black.

The next morning, I had a visit from Dr. Strakowski. His bedside manner was nonexistent. I couldn't get a question out of my mouth. He was rushing through a list of doctor questions like he had a hot date waiting somewhere. When he finally asked how I was feeling, the answer was _peevish_.

"Let's see . . . my entire body hurts—no one has told me what part of me is _not_ broken—and I have no idea how long I've been a guest here at this Holiday Inn." I was sulking. As an afterthought, I added, "And I have no idea what happened to the psychopath who tried to kill me. Other than that, I guess things are just peachy."

Mouth open in surprise, he raised an eyebrow and peered over the top of his glasses as if Nurse Lillian could shed some light on my snarky attitude.

With one hand on her ample hip, she enlightened him in a tone that sent a flush over his cheeks. "No one was supposed to upset her until she was stabilized— _your_ orders from the ER. She's been here for two days now, and today is her first day of real interaction. She's been sedated most of the time. I'd say she's been remarkably patient, considering."

After scrutinizing my chart again, Dr. Strakowski sat down next to the bed and settled in. "Okay, you're right. You do need some answers. The nutshell is you were dropped off outside of the ER two nights ago. You were unresponsive. In addition to numerous cuts and a broken ankle, you had a lacerated spleen, a punctured lung, and a major concussion. We rushed you into surgery to repair the spleen. You've got a long recovery ahead of you. But you _will_ recover. You're very lucky."

He made some notes, gave Nurse Lillian new orders for meds, and then left to finish his rounds. Five minutes later, a detective took his vacant chair. She was a brunette with wide brown eyes and a kind face. She must have been around thirty or so.

"Mica, I'm Officer Halliwell with Plattsburgh P.D. I've been assigned to your case. Do you feel strong enough to give your statement today?"

For the next hour, I recited everything I could remember about Scott Flynn before he lost his friggin' mind and tried to kill me two days ago:

I was out cruising around with my best friend, Ricki. I was focused on switching lanes when a distraction popped up. Braking with a jolt, I pointed to a familiar guy idling at the curb who was staring in our direction.

"Hey, isn't that Scott Flynn over there?"

"Yeah, that looks like him. Who cares?"

"He's waving at us. Let's see what he wants."

She shot him a glance and frowned in disapproval. "I don't know, dude. He's kind of a jerk."

"True. But he's a cute jerk."

Ignoring her warning, I studied him through my Oakleys as he sauntered over. It was hard to make out his expression in the shadows. There was something about him that attracted and repelled me at the same time. It might have been the motorcycle that tipped the odds in his favor. In my mind, that made him one hundred percent more attractive. I was dying to go for a ride, but he hadn't offered. I'd been flirting with Scott all summer. It was now officially fall. At this point he was on my last nerve. He was hot and cold. He was annoying. He was hot. Sometimes hotness overruled annoying so I was keeping my options open, but so far, we hadn't gotten past the flirting stage. He was an enigma. Half the time he ignored me, half the time he tried to get me alone for a hook-up. I'd say no thanks. He'd laugh and leave with someone else. The whole situation was getting old.

He leaned into the window like he owned the car. My toes curled as I breathed him in. It wasn't fair that he should be so gorgeous and smell amazing too.

He barely nodded at Ricki, dismissing her completely. "So, Mica, you got time for a ride?"

This was unexpected. I searched his face for clues. Well . . . he didn't _look_ like he was up to anything . . . Why not? "Okay, I guess that would be cool. Who all's going?"

He flashed a devastating grin. "It's just you and me, babe. Scared?"

"You wish."

It was a perfect day for a ride. Once we were on Route 9, I settled my cheek against his back and held on tight. The orange and yellow trees were a blur as we raced through the countryside. The colors were incredible. Mother Nature had outdone herself.

The bike roared like a living animal. Part of me was terrified that we'd go sliding off the road and die; the other part of me was . . . not. What a rush! The wind in my hair, the vibrations from the engine, the awesome thrill of speed—so cool! I was a little disappointed when we reached The Rocks. The wooden boards creaked as we rolled slowly across the decrepit covered bridge to get to a parking area. The Rocks were really just a place in the river where people hung out. The river was usually low, so there were huge slabs of granite lying all over the place. They were flat enough that you could sit chairs on them if you wanted to. We grabbed a blanket and claimed our space. We were completely alone in the middle of the river.

I leaned back on my elbows, eyes closed against the sunlight, taking it in with all of my senses. The gurgle of the water, the warmth of the sun, the earthy scent of dying leaves . . . Everything was perfect; peaceful.

"Comfortable?" Scott drawled from behind dark sunglasses. He sat cross-legged on the opposite side of the blanket.

"Pretty much." I smiled up at him from behind my own lenses.

He was so gorgeous sitting there, dark bangs brushing his forehead, sexy mouth set in a half-smile, eyes impossible to read. I still couldn't believe he had invited me today. It was kind of strange. I didn't completely trust him, but I didn't think I had anything to worry about. What was the worst thing that could happen? He'd try to kiss me? I could deal with that.

Unable to resist the urge to commune with nature, I hopped to my feet. "God, it's too beautiful to sit still!" I jumped from our rock to the next one over, and then to the one next to that one.

He jumped up to chase me and the race was on. Caught up in the game, I slipped and ended up in the river. It was only ankle deep, but it was ridiculously cold. Still playing, I kept splashing through it to the next rock, when suddenly Scott grabbed my arm and I lost my balance. I fell back against his chest, laughing and flailing my arms. He was laughing too as we stood catching our breath. And then he stopped. Our faces were inches apart, and I suddenly realized how close he was holding me. I was molded against him so tightly I could feel the snap on his jeans. Something creepy flashed in his eyes. Flushing, I tried to step back. Rubbing his thigh against mine, he tightened his grip on my shoulders. His smile didn't quite reach his eyes. The creepy expression was back.

"Scared yet?" he murmured, a watchful fixity in his face.

I stuttered an uncomfortable laugh as I tried to put some space between us. "There are people walking up. Let me go. This is embarrassing."

He didn't relax his hold, but he looked towards the people who had just pulled up. There was a group of about six men and women. Two of the bigger men were eyeballing us with interest. Surely, they would step in if things got out of hand? Scott released an insincere chuckle as if he was just playing around.

"Come on. Let's go." All sense of play evaporated as he snatched up the blanket.

Heavy grey clouds buried the sun, the temperature plummeted, and I shivered with more than cold. Scott was pretending to look at me, but I could see he was still watching the two big guys. His stance was not protective, but more territorial. I didn't like it. It didn't feel right. Scott's face seemed different to me. His hooded eyes didn't seem deep or sexy now; they seemed cold and calculating. His hard mouth didn't seem mysterious; it just seemed cruel. The first trickles of fear skittered down my spine. This wasn't fun anymore.

I tried to keep my voice casual as I said, "I think maybe we should leave. I'm soaked and freezing my butt off. Let's head back."

Expression stony, he shrugged. "Sure, babe. I don't like the looks of those guys anyway."

As I settled on the motorcycle, I realized I had a big problem. I really didn't want to touch him now. The earlier feeling of adventure was gone. I just wanted to get home—preferably in one piece. Scott took the curves at a ridiculous speed. The sky was dark with a building storm. It was getting more and more ominous. We were going so fast my lips were numb. I was pretty sure he was going to kill us. I yelled for him to slow down, but he just pushed the bike harder. At this point, prayer seemed like a good idea.

Oh, please, God! If you get me out of this, I would be so grateful. I swear I won't go near this guy again. He's crazy! Please get me home alive!

The bike slowed enough for us to turn onto a gravel road that I didn't recognize. I didn't know what to think until I saw an old house looming up in front of us.

"What are you doing?" I yelled over the roar of the engine.

He ignored me.

Where were we? What was he doing? All my instincts were screaming that this was _BAD_. Running through escape options, my brain went into overdrive. There weren't many. Could I jump off and run? No, we were still going too fast. I didn't see any other signs of people. No place to run to. Shit. This was not good.

Fat drops of rain pelted us as we rolled up to the wraparound porch. On cue, Mother Nature unleashed her fury. Screaming winds drove the rain against the house like a hurricane. Before I could object, he yanked me through the door. Thunder boomed so close I jumped out of my skin. Lightning lit up the windows, turning Scott's face into something sinister, demonic. Visions of horror movies raced through my head. This was so, so bad.

"Looks like we made it just in time. Lucky for you I knew about this place." He smiled, teeth gleaming whitely in the darkness. Another flash of lightning turned them into fangs.

"Get away from me." I was trying to sound fierce, but my shaking voice probably wasn't convincing.

He chuckled before wagging his head slowly as though I were a disobedient child. "Mica, Mica, Mica. You've been hot for me for months. Don't try to deny it. Now's your chance to see what you've been missing. We have privacy here."

I _had_ been hot for him—sort of—that's true. But that was a different Scott. _This_ guy was creeping me out. Between his mood swings, the violent storm, and my overactive imagination, I was almost convinced he was Satan himself. Storm or no storm, it was way past time to get the hell out of here.

"I didn't know you then. I didn't want to hook up with you. I just thought you were cute. There's a difference, genius!" I snapped, backing away, edging towards the door.

"Oh, really? All those looks you gave me? The flirting? I know what you were doing. You were doing what all girls do. You were reeling me in. And now, you've got me." He'd been slowly stalking me while giving that little speech.

I lunged for the door, but he blocked it with his body. Cursing, I yanked at his arm. It was like trying to move a tree. He crossed his arms and refused to budge.

Between my teeth, I ground out, "Let me _out_."

He shook his head, amused. "No."

Crossing my own arms, I glued my eyes to his. "Get out of my way, you dick."

"Sticks and stones."

Before I could move, he fisted my hair, dragging me across the room. Struggling to break loose, I screamed bloody murder. He dropped me so hard my head bounced. I was still seeing stars when I felt him doing something with my wrist. Was he tying me up? Oh, hell no! I went insane, twisting my body, kicking, slapping, biting—anything to make him stop. He hesitated long enough for me to kick him in the face. His nose broke with a crunch. I staggered away, lunging for the door. Something hard hit me in the middle of my back, and I fell forward against the corner of a table. The pain was shocking. I couldn't move, couldn't breathe. My vision dimmed to black. When I came to, I was tied to a table leg by one arm, every breath a knife in my side.

"Okay, you stupid bitch. I know you're awake. Stop playing around. We have things to do." Leaning down, he glared into my eyes, nose dripping blood onto my face. "You're going to pay for breaking my nose."

"Get off me, you pig!"

In answer, his mouth crushed mine. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't draw a breath. I tried to struggle, but every movement shot pain through my body until I just collapsed. He ripped his mouth away to bite my neck, his breath harsh in my ear, his body tense with fury and just plain insanity. With a satisfied grunt, he pinned me to the floor, groping at me in the dark.

"That feels good, doesn't it, slut? You girls are all the same. Oh, yeah, this is what you wanted from me, isn't it? Well, we've got all night." He bit me until I cried out.

Running on an adrenaline boost, I swung a fist at his temple. The connection vibrated all the way down my arm. It was a weak effort, but I wasn't just going to lay here and let him rape me. That was clearly what he was working up to. I had to do something to stop him.

He didn't appreciate my efforts and lost it completely. Screaming obscenities, he punched me in the face again.

Burning pain shocked me into consciousness. My head swam in circles as I tried to make sense of things. Where was I? What happened? I shifted position and pain knifed into my ribs. Sucking in a gasp of air, I tried to blink to clear my head. There was nothing but blackness in front of me. No, no, no! I tried again but still nothing. Scott! Did he take my eyes? Oh, my God, no! Vicious fingers gripped my chin. The pain made my eyes water.

"Oh, good, you're alive. I was hoping you weren't dead. I've had some time to think about this while you were sleeping. Don't worry. It'll be fun for you too." The caressing tone sent my heart into spasms.

Now what?

The tears loosened the dried blood that had sealed my eyes shut. I wasn't blind after all. His face shimmered like a mirage, and all four of his mouths grinned evilly down at me. My ears rang like church bells; my head throbbed viciously. His face swam in front of me again. I couldn't focus. My thoughts were scattered. _FOCUS!_ I have to stay awake to get out of here.

"I found a few things in the basement."

There was a screwdriver, a flashlight, a piece of wire, some duct tape, and a hunting knife gleaming in the faint light. He was lovingly stroking the knife with glazed eyes. I have got to get out of here. I tried to get up, but my body didn't want to cooperate. Gasping at the shooting pain, I stomped down the urge to cry. Escape was impossible. I couldn't get up, let alone walk away. There was no hope. No one would save me. I would die here after he was done with me. He certainly couldn't leave me alive.

Totally into his new role as psycho, he was playfully rubbing the heavy flashlight over my legs. Up and down he rubbed, humming thoughtfully as he moved. Without warning, he smashed the end of the flashlight into my ankle. Shrieking with agony, it was all I could do to hold back the bile that rose in my throat. I didn't want to give him any more satisfaction than he was going to get.

When I finally looked at him again, he was considering the knife with unconcealed anticipation. Shit. Here it comes. I couldn't look away. Like a mouse watching a snake, I watched my own personal nightmare plan my murder. Turning the blade one direction then another, he was feeding my terror, enjoying it.

He was unsnapping my jeans when an idea hit me. I could stop this! Clenching my teeth against the agony, I thrashed my legs to the side, trying to push him off, but I couldn't move him. Instead, he ground his crotch against me so I knew exactly what he was planning. Getting off on my pain, he toyed with me, making my stomach heave in protest. The bile was still trying to find its way out. I swallowed hard. It wasn't time yet.

More horrifying than any nightmare, Scott loomed over me, blood running from his nose spattering onto my chest. The smell churned my stomach even faster. My ribs screamed as he jammed his hand over the break, the blast of pain sending waves of nausea swamping me. His eyes gleamed with an unholy joy as lightning flashed outside. Gasping for air, I inhaled a mouthful of his blood. The sharp metallic taste was the last straw.

There was no way I could miss. He was too close to escape. By the time my stomach was empty, his face, chest, and most of my body were covered in vomit.

Absolutely crazed, he started kicking me while screaming, "You disgusting fucking bitch! You ruined it!"

The last thing I heard was, "Stupid bitch! You ruined everything."

"And that's what happened," I added to fill the heavy silence that came with the end of my statement.

Officer Halliwell pressed the off button on the tape recorder and sat back to take a few notes.

By the time I finished recounting my story, I was thoroughly pissed. I had been in too much pain the last few days to be mad. I felt a little better now. My head was beginning to clear. Now there was room for anger. Hell, yes, I wanted to press charges! Yes, I would be glad to testify. Yes, I would identify the items they had found at the abandoned house. I would do whatever they needed to get that psycho off the streets. He was a lunatic. I wanted some payback.

I had a few questions for the detective before she left. "How did you know about the house? Did I talk to you before today?"

"No, you didn't. We got an anonymous tip. Someone called the station right after you were brought to the ER."

Really? An anonymous tip? Was there a witness? If there was, why didn't they help me? The pain meds made me a little groggy. I shook my head to clear it. "A lot of things are fuzzy right now. How _did_ I get to the ER?"

Her pale nose wrinkled in thought, she said, "You know, that's a funny thing. Someone brought you here. We know that for sure; _you_ didn't call 911, and you sure didn't walk here by yourself. The hospital keeps a record of everyone who comes in. We've talked to them, but they don't have a name for us. Apparently, someone carried you in, yelled for a doctor, and then left before anyone could get his name. And now, no one can agree on what this person looked like. It's like he doesn't exist. Weird, right?"

I was stunned. This went way beyond weird. "Did you show them a picture of Scott Flynn? Was it him?"

"No, it wasn't him. We showed his picture and no one thought it was him. He's in the wind right now. We've got an APB out on him. Don't worry, we'll pick him up. He's a kid. He won't get too far." She seemed very confident about that, but she hadn't looked into those unholy eyes.

I shuddered at the thought of him out there . . . waiting. He wouldn't be done with me yet. He'd want to finish what he started, wouldn't he? "He's a freakin' lunatic! Probably he'll be back to break the rest of me! Oh, my God! You have to find him!" It was too much to deal with, and I started to cry.

When I woke up again, I was in a new room. The doctors were happy with my progress and felt I didn't need to be in ICU. My face was bandage free and freaktacular. I was a beautiful collage of black, blue, green, yellow, and red. My eyes were less puffy, but I was still squinting out of the left one. My face was mostly heart-shaped, but it would be a while before my nose would be pert again, or my cheekbones would be defined. People used to say I was pretty; now, I was just pretty hideous . . . Ricki and Dani were perched on the end of my bed, oohing and ahhing over my bruises as good friends should do. I'd just finished giving them the short version of my close encounter with Satan.

"You look like hell, girlfriend." Ricki was ever so tactful. That's what made her so awesome. She also had no filter, so interesting observations popped out of her mouth from time to time. She was trying to keep my spirits up, but she was worried. She'd peeled the red polish off of her thumbs again. The thumbs were the first to get whacked when she was stressed. Every few seconds, she smoothed the curly red strands that made up her hair color this month. No one knew what her real color was—I'd assumed brunette like mine, but this dark red was pretty good on her. She was making bad jokes and telling me all about her sexcapades with a hot stud she met on vacation.

It wasn't totally distracting, so in spite of her antics, I was becoming more depressed as the numbing haze of pain meds wore off. I was physically healing well, but emotionally, I was still teetering. I was trying to hold onto the anger to keep from falling into despair. It was a battle that I was losing inside, but I put on a strong face for my visitors.

They were my buds. They didn't need to know about the handprints bruised into my arms or the perfect teeth marks left on my neck. They would be horrified—make that _more_ horrified—and I didn't want that much sympathy. Those marks seemed so much more . . . personal, somehow. Like a brand of sorts. I didn't want anyone else to know.

That evening I had a new visitor. I was finishing up the dinner that Nurse Stephanie had brought in. Tonight, I was having red Jell-O and a chocolate protein shake. Thanks to that freak, I would be on baby food for another month. Stabbing the Jell-O with a fork, I yearned for a cheeseburger. I was simmering in my own anger when the chaplain came in. He introduced himself as Father Murphy before asking if I'd like to talk.

"Not really." I sat the fork down with a clink. I was done murdering the Jell-O for now.

He made small talk for a few minutes, and then said, "I can't begin to know what you are feeling right now, Mica. But I always feel better when I pray. Would you like me to pray with you?"

_Definitely not_. I had no interest in praying to a God who had let my life go to hell. I had _tried_ prayer when I needed His help the most. I thought of my dead mother and Scott Flynn. Yeah, so where was God then? As far as I was concerned, it was useless to pray. No one was listening.

"No thank you, Father. Your God has forsaken me. I'm on my own."

That night I dreamed again. I was replaying the night with Scott in my sleep. But my mind was ad-libbing here and there, and the dream wasn't exactly the same as my memories. Now I was running through endless hallways, doors on both sides, some open, some locked. A storm raged outside, and I ran for my life while blue flashes of lightning cast terrifying shadows, and wind howled through the eaves. Behind me, Scott was a dark shape, more beast than human, relentlessly pursuing me through hallway after hallway. I ran panting, starved for oxygen, but never slowing, never stopping. He would butcher me if I did. I ran until I finally stumbled and fell. Scott was on me before I hit the floor. I was screaming as he pulled the hunting knife out and gutted me with it . . . So much blood; so much pain.

"Payback, bitch!" Scott's eyes captured mine just before he vanished into smoke.

I should have been dead, but the dream didn't let me die. Instead, I laid there bleeding and screaming in terror. I begged God to help me . . . sobbing and praying.

Oh, God, please! I'm begging you. Please let me die!

But He didn't answer me. I didn't die, and the horror didn't stop. I could feel my blood flowing out—my life slipping away until only drops remained. My breathing gradually grew shallow before slowing to nothing more than a wish. I gave in to despair and willed my soul to let go, my body to die. And then, in the strange way of dreams, I rose above my body, watching as the last drop of blood joined the puddle below. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a familiar light. I lifted my head to see it moving closer to me. Too weak to do more than widen my eyes, my plea was more thought than sound.

"Please . . ."

The light dimmed. A golden hand reached out and touched my face. The dream went black.

# Chapter 2: Recovery

DAD AND JANET LIVE on a small side street not too far from the center of Plattsburgh, New York. White with forest green trim, the two-story house had dormers over the upstairs windows and a small covered porch stretching across the front. Lucky for me, a detached garage sat behind it. A narrow, covered pathway led from the house to the garage. The front yard was graced by a huge old maple tree and someone had planted pink roses all around the house. It was pretty in a 1950s New England cottage kind of way.

The small house was stuffed full with too many people and not enough bathrooms, so I had a two-room apartment in the garage. And thank God for that! A college student needed her space, right? Before she married my dad two years ago, Janet had three kids of her own. The youngest, Trevor, was a carrot-top with sweet tan freckles splashed across his nose. He was nine years old and an Xbox junkie. He acknowledged his addiction to video games, but absolutely refused to cop to the raw sugar monkey on his back. He'd been known to lose his mind over cupcakes, but he was a sweet boy 99 percent of the time. When he was banished from the Xbox, he'd gotten into the habit of banging on my door for sympathy.

Then there were the twins, Abby and Monica. They were 12 years old and weren't identical. They were the same height but had different faces. Abby had green eyes and blond hair, which she wore in a short pixie cut. She was a cute jockette who'd rather play basketball than shop. Monica had waist-length straight blond hair and startling eyes; one was brown and one was leaf green. She was the polar opposite of Abby. This little girl was already planning her career in modeling.

This morning there was a layer of frost on everything. Red maple leaves lay scattered and sparkling in the bright morning sun. I was sitting on the front porch in my fluffy purple robe, sipping hot chocolate with Abby. Her sleepy eyes were innocent as she sat beside me on the bench. I couldn't resist tousling her messy hair a bit.

As of today, I've been out of the hospital for a couple of weeks and am looking nearly normal on the outside. Except for the cast on my foot, I am not _obviously_ hurt. I wasn't sleeping well though. The nightmares were still haunting me. I looked like an irritated raccoon, thanks to the massive dark circles ringing my eyeballs. I stayed up late, journaling and listening to music. Occasionally, I did some homework to avoid flunking out of my freshman year of college.

The dreams were terrifying but happened so often I was getting good at throwing myself out of them when they got too intense. Once awake, I refused to go back to sleep. My mind roiled with memories and none of them were happy ones. Today wasn't any different. I was up at 6:00 am. Abby—the sweet girl—heard me making cocoa and came downstairs to keep me company. My apartment was great, but it lacked a kitchen so I had to come to the main house for hot things. One day I would buy a microwave.

She thoughtfully nibbled on her fingernail before eyeing me with a frown. "Mica, do you still feel scared?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I know you were really hurt and scared when you came home from the hospital. I think you look less scared now. But . . ."

"But what?"

"I'm really scared you'll leave now. I don't want you to go back to Ohio! I'd miss you so much!"

I gave her a one-armed hug. "Oh, I'm still scared, Abby. I'm scared a lot, but I can't let that creep ruin my life. I like being here. I finally have friends, and I love having a family. I'm not planning to go anywhere."

Not that I _could_ go back to Ohio. There wasn't anyone there to live with. For better or for worse, my life was here.

She hugged me back, and we finished our drinks in silence. I _wasn't_ planning to go anywhere. I wasn't going to let Scott Flynn scare me away. He could kiss my ass! Jerk! I was glad he was in jail. He'd been arrested a few days ago while trying to hide out at his friend J.J.'s house. J.J.'s parents weren't too big on watching the news, but eventually his mom caught a bit on the radio. Not being a complete inbred moron, she put two and two together and came up with Scott. The police were very appreciative. It was a small reprieve for me even though I wasn't looking forward to dealing with him and the police, but I would do whatever they asked me. I just wanted him gone.

I was ready to start moving again. I was tired of being in pain and tired of sitting around. I was ready to get started on Plan B. Plan B involved me tearing up the mountains on my new snowboard and raising some serious hell with Ricki on her dad's snowmobiles. I was itching to get moving and start _living_. I had been mostly dead for a month now. It was time to feel the wind on my face, blood running through my veins. Life was too short to sit around. Poor Dani would probably kill me. She was such a good friend, but I didn't think she would like what I had in mind for winter sports. Dani was more of a hot cocoa and roaring fire kind of girl. Toss in some intellectual discussion and she was a happy camper. Ricki and Tyler, on the other hand . . . _they_ would understand. I sent a fervent request to Mother Nature—make it snow!

Later that week, we had a visit from Officer Halliwell. She and my dad showed up at the door to my apartment just as I came in from class.

"Hi, Mica, Officer Halliwell has some good news for us. Do you mind if we come in?" Dad asked with unusual sensitivity.

I waved them inside. Good news would be nice for a change. I was tired.

"The good news is the lab in Albany finally gave us the results of all the samples we sent for DNA testing last month. The other tests came back too. We've got a 99 percent match that the hair, skin, blood, and saliva belong to Scott Flynn. The fingerprints and cloth fibers came back to him too. The DA brought him and his lawyer in this morning. His lawyer wisely advised him to plead guilty to a lesser sentence; aggravated assault vs. attempted murder. I liked him for attempted murder, but I know you didn't want to drag this through a trial. He's going to do some time and will be off the streets for now."

Dad came over and sat on the foot of the bed, his mouth turned up in a rare smile. I was just relieved to have any news at all. It wasn't the best news, though. That would be something more like, "So sorry to have to tell you that Scott Flynn was mauled by a bear and lost both balls and most of his dick."

_That_ would've been news worth hearing.

"Is there something wrong, Mica?" Officer Halliwell asked.

Shrugging with uncertainty, I said, "I'm glad he's going to jail, but I . . . I still don't understand how . . . I mean, why would he attack me?" I bit my lip. "He said it was my fault."

She objected strongly, saying, "Absolutely not! You didn't do anything wrong. You had no idea how unstable he is." She dropped her gaze to her lap for a few seconds. Finally, she said, "Look, I'm not supposed to tell you this, but I think you have a right to know. You can't share this with anybody else. Will you give me your word?"

My dad and I both agreed to keep whatever she said a secret. She nodded once before beginning her story. "You probably don't know this, but he's only lived here for two years. Before that, he lived in Rochester. Anyhow, during our investigation we discovered quite a long juvie record. He's got a history of violence that goes back to age ten. Starting with assaulting a kid on the playground, he added two more assault charges that year before graduating to assault with a deadly weapon—a bat—at age twelve. He claimed self-defense, but there were witnesses who disagreed. He was placed in counseling and settled down for a few months. But then his mother was found dead of a heroin overdose, and he spiraled out of control." She paused to check her watch.

"What about his father?" I was horrified for the little kid he once was.

She snorted with derision. "Well, according to the state's records, mostly his father got drunk and beat him. After his mother's death, Scott was arrested for harassing a neighbor girl who he later beat up and nearly killed. The girl was blinded in one eye. Her family was so afraid of him they moved to another state. He served six months in juvie. There weren't any more incidents after that. That is, until his father mysteriously died when their house burned down. Coincidentally, Scott wasn't home when the trailer burned, and his father's body was burned to ash. Cause of death was never determined."

She finished up with, "As his only living relative, his grandfather agreed to take him in here. I know this is a lot to take in. I just wanted you to know that he has been violent and unstable for years. This isn't your fault. Apparently, he's a pretty good actor since no one suspected anything."

I asked, "So what happens now?"

"Well, I'll keep you posted. I don't know how long he'll be locked up yet. You're going to be okay though. I've talked your dad into putting an alarm on this little apartment of yours. It'll give you some warning if anyone tries to get in. Also, I'd put up some motion lights outside so the yard is lit up at night."

Dad added, "I think a couple of cameras might be good too. We'll put one by the doors. We'll know if someone tries to get inside."

A few weeks later, it was snowing. _Really_ snowing. Thank you, Mother Nature! Ricki and I were killing time while we waited for Dani to get off of work. Overflowing with excited energy, I pirouetted like a ballerina on the sidewalk in front of Zen. If you needed New Age crystals, incense, or interesting herbs, Zen was the only place in town. The tiny shop was stuffed inside an old '50s storefront that Dani's mom had painted white and gold. This was Dani's home away from home and current place of employment.

"Hello, my lovelies!" a friendly voice greeted us from right behind me. I jumped with a squeak, hand pressing my heart to keep it from leaping out of my chest.

"Geez, you scared the crap out of me!" I breathed unnecessarily to the tiny woman who appeared out of nowhere.

She had the kind of face that wouldn't age; pretty, elf-like, ivory skinned, with huge grey eyes. She had pale blond hair with skinny braids randomly plaited over her head. She was wearing a flowing kind of top with a long skirt and moccasins. She was a picture-perfect hippy chick from 1972. She was Dani's mother. Dani could be her clone, minus the moccasins.

As usual, she glowed like a candle. The woman practically oozed peace and tranquility. It was frightening. "Dani'll be done in a minute. Come in and get warm."

Seeing no point in arguing, we shuffled in to wait. Still hyped up on the novelty of snow, I grabbed Ricki's arm entirely too hard. "Ricki! I've got an idea!"

"Uh-oh, I know that look. I don't know what you're thinking, but I swear I don't want to take off my clothes and swim out to the island again! It's way, way too cold. Don't even think about it."

"Oh, come on, not that again? You need to let it go. You survived, didn't you? Look how much you learned. You had no idea you could swim that far, did you? And you have to admit it was awesome!" I was still enthusiastic. I thought it would be fun to swim naked to a little island in the lake back in September. It seemed like a good idea at the time . . . Okay, so maybe _not_ the best plan ever. We almost drowned.

"I was thinking more along the line of getting some guys with trucks to take us up the mountain tonight. We could build a bonfire in the snow. Wouldn't that be cool?"

With perfect timing, Dani popped up beside us. "What are we doing?" Her gaze bounced from me to Ricki, searching for clues.

Ricki sighed all the way up from her toes. "Oh, all right. What the hell? Let's call Tyler and Aric."

Dani perked up at Aric's name. They were going out, and she would be up for anything as long as he was there. Her grey eyes nearly misted over just thinking about him now . . . It was nauseating. Love? Meh.

Hours later, we were gathered around a huge roaring bonfire in a small clearing way up on the side of the mountain. It was still snowing, but the flakes turned into rain over the flames. They popped and sputtered as they hit the fire. Other than that, the woods were completely silent from the blanket of snow. As far as good times went, this wasn't half bad in spite of the freezing temperatures. My plan was a good one for a change. Everyone was content. Dani and Aric were snuggled together sharing a beer while Dani pulled ghost stories out of her head. She had millions of them. On the other side of the fire, Ricki was laughing and playing around with Tyler's friend Kevin. Kevin was trying to flirt by shoving snow in her sweater. I shook my head. Guys are _so_ bizarre. What makes them think freezing snow between a girl's boobs is a turn on?

"Mica, catch!" Tyler warned just before lobbing a snowball at my face.

Startled into sliding off of my log, I landed butt first in the snow. Laughing too hard to help me up, he collapsed beside me before shoving a fistful of snow into my face.

Giggling and slipping back down again, I clutched his sleeve to pull him over into the snow and sat on him. With many threats and curses, he tried to get up; I tried to hold him down. It was an epic battle that he was winning when I heard it.

"Shh! What was that?" I hissed. Everyone gaped at me, beers half lifted, mouths frozen in mid-word.

Branches snapped behind us. _Crack_ , _crack_ , _snap_. Silence. As one, we all stood up and turned towards the forest. It was pitch black. I couldn't see a thing. I squinted so hard my eye went into spasms.

_Crack, snap, snap_.

Where was it coming from? The snow distorted the sounds. Tyler reached over to shush me with his hand just as I opened my mouth to speak. That's when I heard the grunting and snuffling sounds— _crack_ , _snap_ —a dark shape appeared in the trees, more a shadow really, but a huge one that lumbered towards us.

I lost it right then. "Bear! Bear! Run!" I dove head first into the truck before Tyler could move. "Let's go!"

It was chaos after that. Tyler jumped into the driver's seat as Ricki dove in behind me. Everyone else was doing the same thing, with a lot of screaming and yelling. No way was I getting eaten by a bear in my first snow in New York! Oh, hell, no. I was _so_ out of here!

As we fishtailed down the logging road, I imagined a very surprised bear staring at our taillights disappearing into the snowy tunnel of trees.

It had been a couple of months since I got out of the hospital, and I was feeling mostly healthy thanks to my youth—and my friends taking me out for fresh air. Tonight was another party night and I was actually excited to get dressed up and be surrounded by people. I peered closer at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. Was my nose crooked? I turned my head back and forth for a better view. Mm, maybe it was okay. I inspected my eyes for changes. Wide and tilted up at the outside, they shone dark blue, but they were different since Scott. They had a shuttered look to them, a wariness that I couldn't mask without real effort. I wasn't quite healed. I forced a happy smile that would reach my eyes. Ugh! That's worse. I look like a crazy person. Better to keep the smile small. I would just hope no one paid much attention to my eyes.

I was reaching for lip gloss when a movement flashed across the mirror. I spun around, but the room was empty. Snatching up a can of hairspray, I crept around the corner. If someone was in here, they would get a rude surprise. I was armed this time. With heart pounding in my chest, I swept my eyes around the rest of the empty apartment. I must have imagined the dark-haired man in the hall. At least my ghost didn't look like Scott Flynn. Maybe I needed a dog.

The house party was rocking by the time Dani, Ricki, and I got there. We were fashionably late, as usual, but Dani's cousin Angela wouldn't mind. Probably she was too busy playing hostess to even notice. It had been a long time since I'd gone to a party. I was ready to have some fun tonight. I kept trying to push that man from my hallway out of my head, but he kept intruding anyway. There was something familiar about him. I was meandering from the pool house back inside when I saw him again.

I stopped in my tracks and gawked like a twelve-year-old girl. Whoa!

Who are _these_ guys?

There were two ridiculously gorgeous guys standing in the shadows near a covered walkway. They were talking intently, scanning the crowd for someone. There's no way they were partying. No possible way—they were too intense— _scarily_ so. They reminded me of Secret Service agents, but without the suits. Alarm bells clanged in my head. Instinctively, I crouched behind a snow-covered shrub to watch them. The taller one seemed to be chewing out the shorter one. The shorter one was listening, nodding his head unhappily. I couldn't stop staring. _It was him!_

His hair was military short; his face hard and lean. I could see his cheekbones from my hiding place. I couldn't make out his eyes, though. He looked as if he was about to kick someone's ass or take over a small country. He stood tensely, listening to the other one. His powerful shoulders were squared back, tugging against his t-shirt. Taking advantage of my invisibility, I let my eyes wander over the rest of his tall, muscular body. Glancing down at his arms, I did a little swoon and kept going. Sadly, his good parts were hidden in the shadows. Oh, yum! He was hot. My stomach did a slow roll as I watched his lips move. Nice lips . . . beautiful mouth. _Dangerous stranger._ I gave myself a mental slap. Dangerous men were bad. I licked my lips in anticipation even though I had no intention of kissing this guy. Was he really in my house earlier? Surely not. That's impossible.

"Find her!" The wind shifted and the harsh words drifted clearly. The taller one flipped a hand towards the house. This one practically screamed _Navy Seal_ by his massive size and military bearing. Compared to the first guy, he was bulkier in the shoulders, but had a lean torso and a nice butt. I imagined he had amazing abs. Yes, he was gorgeous, but he also looked mean. There was something about the arrogant set of his jaw that said he'd take no crap from anyone. What were they doing here?

"Mica! There you are! We've been looking for you. Come back inside. Someone found a karaoke machine!" Tyler interrupted my spying when he popped up next to me, face glowing with one too many beers. Intending to drag me inside, he reached out to grab my arm, and I flinched away from his touch.

The strangers zeroed in on me like I was standing in a spotlight. Both sets of eyes pinned me to the ground, and I froze like a baby deer. While Tyler babbled about karaoke, I watched them watch me until the hair on the back of my neck stood on end. Both stared so intently that I was afraid I would burst into flames. They seemed to recognize me. How was that possible? Who were these guys? The big one said something to the shorter one, and they started moving in my direction. The big one moved like he was stalking prey. I yelped and bolted back to the safety of the house. I was striving for a dignified retreat but knocking people out of the way kind of ruined it.

"What's with you? You look like you've seen a ghost." Tyler skidded to a halt beside me.

I swallowed nervously, glancing over my shoulder, sure we'd been followed. "Did you _see_ those guys?"

"What guys?"

"The two guys who were standing across from us outside! You didn't see them? They were coming over to us."

Tyler looked down his long nose, and said, "Dude, I didn't see anyone but you standing behind a bush. I think you need another beer." He slapped a new beer in my hand and clinked his bottle against mine in a toast.

I stayed inside the rest of the night. I kept a lookout for the "secret agents" (as I cleverly nicknamed them). I didn't see them again. Maybe I had imagined the whole thing? It seemed so real though. It was really late when it was time to go home. Ricki was pretty wasted so I was driving. I wasn't exactly sober, but hey, I had a new philosophy—I would die when it was my turn. In the meantime, I would live life as close to the edge as I wanted, and we'd just see how things turned out. Dani and her boyfriend, Aric, walked us to the car to help Ricki into the backseat. Aric made sure she had a seat belt on and asked how I was doing.

"Oh, I'm fine. I don't feel buzzed at all. Don't worry about us."

He nodded dubiously and told me to drive slowly because the roads were slippery. I only had to drive about thirty miles to get us home. It would be fine. Ricki fell asleep before we turned onto the main highway. Feeling pretty alert, I sung disjointedly to a Lady GaGa song that I barely knew. Tapping my fingers on the steering wheel, I yawned. And yawned again. The miles mocked me as we crept along in the snow. Were we even moving?

My feet were freezing so I turned on the heater. Before long, the car was toasty warm and so were my eyes. Blinking to stay awake, I leaned on the steering wheel to focus better on the road. Not one of my better ideas. The woods were dark around us, and the falling snow obscured everything. It was like driving in a black and white tunnel. My eyes closed and I blinked hard again. The snow was so pretty bouncing off my window. It was mesmerizing. I was drifting off to sleep when the car started to slide and abruptly stopped. The bump jolted me awake. I wasn't alone. I wasn't even driving. I was in the passenger seat.

"What the hell? How did you get here?"

Secret Agent Man from the party pierced me with snapping eyes. "Are you crazy? You almost died back there! Do you know how close you came to wrapping this car around a tree?" His hands flew as he yelled, and I leaned warily away from him. Taking a deep breath, he raised his hands in a gesture of peace. "Calm down; I'm not going to hurt you," he hissed, and wrapped his big hand around mine before I could protest.

I came awake slowly. Moaning happily, I stretched under the covers. So comfortable . . . My sheets were soft, and I was toasty warm. I could stay in bed all day. I cracked my lids to look at the clock. It was 11:00. Reality brought me completely upright. It was 11:00? I hadn't slept this long since before my mother died. I felt good— _unusually_ good. Bursting with energy, I wanted to go for a run. I should be _doing_ something!

After a short three block run, I flung myself back inside. What was I thinking? Who goes running in the snow? There must be ice in my lungs . . . As I stripped off my gloves, I noticed the camera above the door and paused. Something nagged at the back of my mind. I should remember something . . . _something_ to do with the camera. I thought for a second, and it was gone. Poof! I shook my head—no idea.

Ricki popped over later that day. We were sitting on the floor, polishing our toenails and listening to new music. She looked a bit rough after last night.

"Oh, hey, thanks for driving last night. I'm so glad you got us home. My dad said there were a bunch of wrecks from the snow. Were you freaking out?"

I didn't answer. I was thinking hard. That nagging was still there. It had something to do with the drive home. I was puzzling it out. I drove home, right? I remembered getting into the car. I don't remember getting out of the car. I know I wasn't drinking enough to black out. I'd only had two beers the whole night. An image popped into my mind.

"Ricki! Did you see those two super-hot guys last night? They looked like Secret Service or something. I've never seen them before. Did you see them?"

"What guys? I didn't see anyone new. But I was pretty trashed, so I wasn't looking. What about them?"

Video tapes! I jumped up, racing to my dad's office. I pulled up the camera feeds. I wasn't sure what time I got home so I watched from midnight. Come on, come on. Nothing. No movement outside my door. I fast-forwarded a bit until I saw something interesting. At 1:15 a large shadow appeared in the lens' field. I practically pressed my eyeballs to the monitor. Huh. The image showed me unlocking the door and going inside. I was alone. How was that possible? I should be able to remember that. Why didn't I? Something wasn't right. The tape was still running forward while I was puzzling it out. Wait! I stopped the tape.

At 4:12 there was something odd. I backed it up to 1:15 to be sure. There it was again. After the door closed behind me, I saw a faint flash of yellow light in my window. It was subtle, but it was definitely not my lamp. It was fleeting; not constant like the lamp. What was that? I fast-forwarded to 4:12. Another burst of light. There were no other flashes until that time. It was definitely something. But what? I had no clue. Weirder and weirder. I was trudging back through the snow when it hit me. I stopped and inspected the driveway. The snow was undisturbed except for footprints. _Ah ha_ . . .

# Chapter 3: Winter X Games

CHRISTMAS VACATION WAS OVER. It was a new semester, and I couldn't wait to get out of English class to find Ricki. She and I were plotting our winter plans and most of them involved snow and speed. The faster I moved, the more alive I felt. I'd been chasing speed for weeks. Dodging a couple making out by the wall, I rushed around a corner when he stepped out in front of me. Unable to stop, I crashed headlong into the wall of muscle. The impact knocked me on my butt, books flying everywhere.

"Well, look who it is? How's it going, bitch?" He nudged me with his boot. Ouch.

People stopped all around us. The Neanderthal I ran into was Scott's friend, J.J. With heavy bones, thick rubbery lips, and coarse brown hair, he resembled a cave man on his best day. Today he was a cave man with a bad attitude. I was about to go off on him when the atmosphere changed. Suddenly J.J.'s rapt attention was zeroed in on something above me. Still sprawled on the floor, I tried to twist around to see when someone pulled me up by an arm and slid between me and J.J.

"Walk away _now_."

It was _him_!

"I don't think so," J.J. sneered, spreading his feet and bracing for a fight.

Before anyone could react, J.J. swung a fist at the guy's face. Lightning fast, he caught the fist in his hand then forced J.J.'s arm back to his side. He was perfectly silent as he held J.J. still with one hand. J.J. strained against his grip for a second before abruptly relaxing. In fact, he looked a little sheepish. What the heck?

"We're done here. Don't bother Mica again. I'd hate to hear that you did." The sexy lilt gave me goose bumps. British? Irish?

J.J. seemed mesmerized and stared without another word. His mouth just sort of hung open. I wished I could see my rescuer's face, but he was still standing in front of me. The view I had was pretty good, though. Were those Levis?

J.J. nodded obediently and rubbed his fist with his other hand. He had an odd look on his face as he walked away, as if he had just woken up and wasn't sure how he'd gotten there. Slightly disappointed in the non-fight, the crowd started drifting away. My hero towed me off to the side with hard fingers wrapped around my elbow. I started to thank him, but the words disappeared when he turned his eyes in my direction. Wow. They were electric blue. Beautiful. Stunning, really. Mesmerizing, sexy, brilliant, spellbinding . . . I ran out of adjectives and gawked like an idiot. He snapped his fingers to get my attention.

After flushing a hopefully becoming shade of magenta, I reeled in my hormones and managed to stammer, "Th - th - th - thanks."

Instead of asking me out, or asking for my phone number, he considered my flaming cheeks with an amused curl to his lips. Not quite a smile, but close.

"You're welcome. I'm Sean."

That night, I sat on the bed thinking things over. I hadn't had a nightmare since the party. In fact, I was sleeping like a baby. What had changed? Maybe I was really healing. I still missed Mom like crazy, but the pain in my heart was less intense. I didn't miss Marc anymore. Too many things had happened to dwell on him. As far as dickhead guys go, he seemed like a saint next to Scott; after all, he'd only dumped me after I moved here. Long distance relationships were bad, etc., etc. Blah, blah, and more blah. Whatever.

After some family drama and a lot of tears, yelling, and more than a little swearing, Dad was trying to be better, more patient. He'd stopped nagging at me about planning my life. For months he'd been freaking out about my attitude. He thought I was unmotivated . . . It wasn't that. I was dying to get out of this apartment. I wanted that, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was waiting for something to happen. I had no idea what, but it felt like my life was paused. Before I could move on, I had one big issue to deal with—Scott and the destruction he'd left inside my head. I was working on that too.

Since my ankle had healed, I was running and taking a self-defense class. I had a lot to learn but was getting some good training. When I got a little stronger, I was going to up the ante. I would never be a helpless victim again. If I was going down, I would go down kicking some ass. I planned to get a stun gun as soon as I could. Pepper spray has too many limitations. I would be strong and self-sufficient and in control of my destiny. That was the plan, anyway.

Weekends were for playing. And in upstate New York, playing meant snowmobiling. Ricki's father trusted us with his two sleds, so we'd taken off for a day on the mountain trails. It was beyond pretty out here. The forest was blanketed in heavy snow; the pine trees were dark against the brilliant white. Grinning like an idiot, I slightly adjusted the skis to stay centered on the rutted path. The sled responded like an extension of my body. The engine roared; the vibrations made my teeth tingle. It was amazing! The stretches of meadow were like big soft comforters. Once in a while I saw a deer bounding off to one side or another. It was the best way to see the backcountry. Today wasn't an ordinary Saturday though. We were headed to a place where people were doing stunts. I trailed Ricki to a parking area and pulled off my helmet.

"Hey, Ricki! Over here!" It was Ricki's latest obsession. Kevin was in line at one of the ramps. He gave Ricki an optimistic thumbs up. She waved back, her face bright with excitement and no small amount of lust.

"I don't know what to do about him," she confessed with a chuckle. "He's really sweet, but he's so shy. How do I draw him out of his shell?" She cracked herself up and snorted.

The more she snorted, the harder I laughed. It worked for us.

Suddenly serious, she breathed, "There he goes!"

Kevin was next.

We held our breath as he gunned the engine on the straightaway. Gaining full speed, he flew over the ramp. Once airborne, he steered the sled into a complete flip. He pulled it around just in time to land perfectly in the snow. Awesome! I wanted to do that! I was already bounding back to my sled when a familiar voice stopped me cold.

"Yo, Dec! Wait up!"

"Omigod! He's _here_! That's _him_. Look, look!" I don't know what came over me. I lost my mind in a total fan girl move, clutching Ricki's sleeve, towing her around to see Sean. Where did my dignity go?

Fully covered by winter clothes, he was still ridiculously sexy. I could see his dark head from here. His thick, spiky hair was so black it had blue highlights in the sun. Those amazing blue eyes suddenly found mine and held them across the crowded lot. It was like gazing into the ocean. I wanted to dive in. My mouth opened into an _O_ as time seemed to stop. Eventually I realized his expression was amused again. Completely mortified, I flipped a casual wave and whipped around to Ricki.

"What kind of friend are you?" I hissed before sinking into a crouch behind the sled. "Why didn't you stop me? I'm an idiot!"

She was openly appraising Sean and his friend. "Who's his surfer friend?" she asked with an appreciative whistle.

Before I could answer, a pair of boots appeared in front of me. I groaned. It's _got_ to be him. I peeked over the seat, and yep, it was Sean. He offered a gloved hand. I gritted my teeth and pasted a smile on my face as he pulled me up. He immediately took a step back. What did he want? I wasn't in any trouble right now. He noticed my wariness and frowned. He had the cutest little crease between his eyes.

"Don't worry. You won't need to rescue me again. I'm not in any trouble today. No one's here to bother me."

Sean locked eyes with the guy he called Dec, and stated flatly, "Sweetheart, _other_ people aren't your problem."

"Oh, ha ha. That's hilarious. I'm pretty sure I can manage to take care of myself. I've been on my own for a long time, you know."

He inclined his head, and asked with more intensity than called for, "Really? Are you _sure_ you're on your own?" His accent was captivating.

I'd taken a step closer before I noticed and planted my traitorous feet. "Pretty much, yes. But I'll take help now and then. Thanks again. Okay, gotta go!" Tossing my head, I grabbed my helmet. "Ricki, I'm up!"

Sean clamped a restraining hand on the grip, and growled, "What do you mean, _you're up_?"

"I'm learning to jump! It's going to be great. I've been waiting for months, so let go."

"Are you nuts?" He glanced in appeal at Ricki who shrugged and laughed at his irritated scowl.

"I am not _nuts_. Now move or I'll run over you." I gunned the engine in warning. He moved in a huff.

It was amazing flying through the air. I landed with a pretty good wobble, but I didn't lose control, and nobody got hurt. I was thrilled and sped back to do it again—and again—and one more time that day. I looked around for Sean and Dec and didn't see them after my last landing. They were gone.

A few nights later, Dani and I were chilling, talking about spirituality. Dani believed in a lot of things that I didn't—reincarnation, auras, astral projection, etc. I respected her beliefs though and didn't mind learning about them. Psychic and metaphysical concepts were fascinating. Total bullshit, but fascinating. Tonight, we were talking about Heaven and Hell.

She was saying in her usual musical voice, "You have to believe in both if you believe in one. They either both exist or neither does."

"I'm not arguing that point. I just don't know if I still believe in either of them. I _hope_ there is a Heaven because I want to think my mom is someplace like that . . . and not just rotting in the ground. And I'd like to think there's a Hell too, for other people. I'm just not sure about God's role in all this. I'm not sure He's exactly like the preachers say. He doesn't seem to be very kind to me."

Dani opened her mouth, closed it, and swept narrowed eyes around the room. "Did you feel that?"

"Feel what?"

"I felt a presence just now. Didn't you feel it too? It was like a warm breath of air moved passed us. Not a ghost . . . Maybe some other kind of spirit?"

She was definitely giving me the creeps. Out of habit, I stuck my fingernail in my mouth and promptly yanked it back out again. I'm trying to quit. "I didn't notice anything. It must be the heater coming on."

She didn't look convinced. She stared intently at the hallway for a full minute before shrugging and getting back to her story. The hair on my neck stood up, and I shivered. I didn't need any help being edgy at night. Let's not talk about any unexplained _presence_ in my room—I'll start having nightmares again.

Global warming was a myth. The temperature had been well below zero for days. I dragged my purple fleece hat over my ears and tied it under my chin. Not a glamorous look, true, but at least my ears would stay attached. Tugging on my mittens, I trotted over to the railing and looked down.

I'd never heard of a frozen waterfall before. Ausable Chasm was filled with snow; the river and falls frozen like ice sculptures. The water had roared over the rocks until it gradually froze in layers of rolling ice. Stray beams of sunlight glistened like tiny diamonds sprinkled by some capricious snow fairy. Usually thunderous, the falls were eerily muffled. With both hands clutching the icy railing, I leaned over to glory in the wonderland that Mother Nature created one hundred feet below. The mountains called to something primal inside of me, calming my fears, strengthening my spirit. I drove here today to clear my head. I was thinking about Sean. Again.

I hadn't really seen him in the past month. Sometimes I'd catch a glimpse of him on campus, but he didn't talk to me. At first, I thought he just hadn't seen me, but once in a while I'd notice him watching me. I'd wave or smile, but he'd just turn away. That stung. What was his problem anyway? We weren't exactly friends, but he acted like he was too good for me. I puzzled over it for weeks before finally deciding it was his problem—not _mine_. Life was too short to waste any more brain cells on Sean O'Cahan.

Turning my back on the chasm, I gazed blankly at the pine trees, musing at the death of my innocence. Once upon a time, I believed in love and happily ever after. I believed in God. Now? Not so much. I was alone in my world; there was no such thing as destiny and divine intervention. I would make my own way. My life would have meaning because of what _I_ did—not because of what others did for me. Other people weren't dependable and simply _believing_ didn't make dreams come true. No, I would make my own way . . . I didn't think I could live without people, though. I was too sociable to be a loner. One thing was sure—as much as I liked to hang out with my friends, I was alone inside my head—no one really knew me. Right now, I was okay with that.

That night I dreamed I was on fire. My body was in flames, and I was rolling around on the ground trying to put myself out. I rolled so hard I fell right off the bed. I lay on the floor for a minute, trying to wake up. I regretted it when I did. I felt like crap. My head was pounding, my whole body hurt, and I was still on fire. This was not going to be a good day.

"Well, at least you aren't throwing up. You'd feel worse if you were puking on top of everything else." Janet always found the silver lining. Her honey-colored eyes were kind as she efficiently examined me. She'd pulled her thick, blond hair into a twist for work at the hospital. Although she wore little make-up, she was still pretty for a mom. Her skin glowed without any artificial colors or flavors. I was bummed I didn't share her genes.

Feeling pathetic, I rasped, "Yeah, that would suck. Thanks. I'll try to live."

She patted my hand and straightened to go. "No problem, hon. I'll be at the hospital so call my cell if you get worse." She handed me the TV remote on her way out.

I painfully swallowed some water and closed my aching eyes. The flu sucked. The fever kept me from sleeping soundly, and I slipped in and out of vivid dreams. One moment Sean was at the wheel of a strange car in a place that seemed vaguely familiar—then before I could ask him about it, the scene shifted to a forest covered in white. I staggered in the drifting snow, lost and alone. I fell to my knees as the scene shifted to a rundown warehouse in a dark city. I stood shivering in icy rain outside a faded red door, waiting for someone . . . Suddenly there was a bright flash and flames erupted from the building beside me. My clothes caught, and I burned in the rain, calling for help. Explosions shook the ground. Sirens screamed in the distance. They got closer and louder. My head was about to explode . . .

Cool fingers slowly massaged my temples, and the sirens faded away. I sighed contentedly and cracked open my eyes. He dropped his hand and sat back. I must be dreaming.

"Hi," I whispered.

He was beautiful in the dim light; so solid and warm that I wanted to snuggle up and sleep forever. I was so weak that my hand sort of flopped onto his knee. He twitched at the impact and shifted his body so we weren't touching anymore.

"Sean? Don't . . . go," I croaked out the last part. "God, my throat's killing me. I think I'm dying."

A glimmer of humor sparkled in his eyes as he helped me sit up against my pillow. "I'm pretty sure you'll live." He read over the note that Janet left me and briskly set about saving my life. He stuck a thermometer in my mouth and measured out some pills. After pouring me a glass of water, he squatted next to me, motioning for the thermometer.

"Damn!" he swore before holding the thermometer out for me to see. "You really are sick."

I blinked to clear my vision. Did it really say 105°? The numbers were blurry. He tipped the glass against my lips so I could take the pills. I moaned as they scraped down my throat. It hurt and I felt like death. The flu sucked, but he had such pretty eyes . . . Delirious, I drifted off again.

Sometime later, the sound of two men talking dragged me out of deep sleep. Their words made no sense. Was that English? I couldn't understand them but I was floating and dizzy with fever, so I might have imagined the whole thing. I cracked an eyelid. A stranger's face wavered in and out of focus. After a moment, he reached out and wrapped his fingers around my throat.

# Chapter 4: Peace Offering

"HEY, MICA! Welcome back, girl. I missed you in Chem. I was hoping you'd be my lab partner. Do you have one yet?" Tyler ambushed me outside of class. I had only missed two days—I was a walking miracle.

"I'll make you a deal. I'll let you be my partner _if_ you do _your_ half of the work. I'm not doing it all again—I don't have time." I gave him a stern look. We'd had this conversation last semester, and it hadn't worked that time either.

He hung his head in mock shame. "Yeah, sure, I'll do half. I promise."

I was about to reply when I saw someone else I wanted to talk to. _Well, look who it is. Oh, you can run, but you can't hide._ I must have growled out loud because Tyler stopped talking and followed my gaze.

He rolled his eyes and said, "Oh _yay_. See you later."

I was already marching in his direction when he saw me coming. Sean's expression shifted from surprised to wary in a heartbeat. I walked right up to him, ready to do battle.

"Mica," he said evenly, his voice lowered, eyes guarded.

"We need to talk," I said between my teeth.

He casually glanced around at the crowd of people and raised one eyebrow. "Do you think this is the place for that conversation?"

That brought me up short. He wasn't denying it? Huh. I didn't know what to say to that. I expected him to tell me I was imagining things, but the video camera doesn't lie. Something was going on. My fingers curled into fists and I tamped down the urge to growl my frustration. "Fine. Will you meet me at the park at 4:00?"

"If you want."

With that short and not too sweet sentence, he left me standing there until I was late for class. I had questions, and he was going to give me some answers. I wasn't going to settle for anything else. Time dragged like my grandmother's breasts.

Not really dressed for winter because I didn't like bulky clothes, I parked in a sunny spot to avoid freezing to death. Feeling like an ant under a magnifying glass, I sat on my fingers to warm them up. It was still cold, but the snow was starting to melt away and patches of dead grass poked up here and there. People were saying spring was coming. I wasn't in a hurry for spring, though. There was an anniversary I wasn't ready to face. I pushed that out of my mind for now and looked around for Sean. It was a little park without too many places to stash a person. A stone fountain surrounded by a handful of stone picnic tables and a bench was the focal point of the park. In the summer there were wild roses growing along the wrought iron fence, but today, they were just clusters of stalks sticking up from the snow-covered beds. A couple of purple and grey pigeons sat fluffed into their feathers on the roof of a tiny gazebo. One of the birds nudged the other rudely in the side until it flew off in a huff. Okay, so a couple of bickering pigeons, but no gorgeous mystery man just yet.

Settling in to wait, I turned up my radio. I was singing along with Audioslave when someone tapped on the window. My heart was in my throat as I nearly jumped through the roof. Damn it! What was _wrong_ with him? Was he _trying_ to give me a heart attack? But he had no way of knowing how jumpy I was, did he? I gave him the evil eye anyway. Sean's lips twitched, but he didn't laugh. Smart man.

"We might as well sit. Let's grab a bench." Despite the cold, he led the way to the closest picnic table.

I wasn't sure what to say, and the silence got to be awkward. His gaze drifted from my hands to my face before dropping to my breasts, and then shooting back to my eyes. He wasn't in a hurry and just calmly waited for me to say something. His expressionless face bothered me. He seemed older than his years could possibly be. I still couldn't believe he was a student. What would it take to make him lose his composure? What could I do to break through his control? Make him smile? Make him laugh? Make him moan? Shit. What was I thinking? I wanted answers, but now I couldn't think of the questions.

After endless seconds crawled by, I finally blurted, "Did you know I was sick?"

"I heard that, yeah."

"It was the most amazing thing. I was really, really sick but somehow made an amazing recovery."

"Really?" He arched one eyebrow. The arrogant expression was so damn cute I almost lost my train of thought.

He was making this difficult. "Okay, I'll get to the point. Were you in my apartment or not?" Feeling stupid always made me bitchy.

Sean muttered under his breath and abruptly stood up to pace for a minute while I watched in fascination. Even when annoyed and sneaky, he was eye candy. Apparently coming to a decision, he stalked around the table and straddled the bench beside me. He ran his hand over his jaw several times before speaking in a tone that held more than a little resignation.

"Okay, I can't hide this from you now. You have a right to know. Hear me out though."

My surprise must've been obvious because he hesitated a beat before continuing more earnestly.

"Yes, I was in your apartment. I didn't know you were sick, but I was driving by and I recognized your car. I . . . decided to stop and say hi. You didn't answer the door, and I was leaving when I heard you cry out. You must've been dreaming." His eyes roamed over my face, warming to an impossibly brilliant blue when they lingered on my mouth.

I was hypnotized. Licking my lips, I tried not to imagine his lips slanting over mine. Instead of entertaining that fantasy, I leaned forward, my hand reaching for him. "Go on."

"Well, I heard you, and I thought you were in trouble. I sort of pushed my way inside expecting to see you with someone. But you were all alone and clearly out of it." He paused for a heartbeat to gauge my reaction. "Anyway, I could tell you were really sick, and I tried to wake you up. You were practically delirious. I was afraid to leave you alone, so I helped you take some Tylenol and drink some water. I sat with you for a while until your fever went down. Once your fever went down, you seemed to be okay again. I didn't want to freak you out so I left. That's it."

Slightly stunned by his admission, I swept my eyes over his face, searching for lies or secrets, but his expression gave nothing away. With those mesmerizing eyes openly assessing my reaction, he waited, muscles taut with tension.

I believed him. Either he was a really good liar or he was telling the truth. Sensing my acceptance, his shoulders relaxed. Still, I had to ask. "It was just you? No one was with you?"

"Yes, it was just me—really. Who else would be there?"

We sat in silence for a while. My brain was going in a thousand directions; thinking about his story while fighting the urge to throw him down and kiss his fascinating mouth until he smiled at me. Eventually his body heat actually pulled me from my fantasy. Wow. He was burning up. I could feel the warmth of his leg even though we weren't touching. A gust of cold wind blew inside my collar, sending chills racing down my back. Shivering, I automatically edged closer to him.

He shot to his feet. "Okay, then. Good talk. I'll see you around."

"Yeah, sure. Why don't you just go then? Sorry to bother you." I stomped back to the car and left. Geez, I wasn't contagious. He liked me, didn't he? It felt like he did. Was I that bad at reading the signs? Why would he bail? I finally called Ricki for support. She was less than helpful.

"Maybe he's a vampire, and he's trying not to eat you. Did you see him in the sunlight?"

"Yeah, that's it. I thought of that too. He acts like he's afraid of me. Maybe he thinks _I'm_ dangerous?"

That was funny considering the year I'd had.

"Hey, girl, someone's at the door. I'll catch up with you later."

I used the peephole and nearly had a stroke. I yelled, "Just a minute!" and threw on some lip gloss and fluffed out my hair. I ran back to the door before casually opening it.

He held up one hand in a gesture of peace. "Before you say anything . . ."

There was no chance of that! I couldn't believe my eyes. He was standing on my porch, looking delicious in faded jeans and a black sweater. He practically dripped sexiness. I would have forgiven him absolutely anything right then. But he cheated. He brought a guarantee. His eyes were guarded as he stood there waiting for me to say something. I bent down on one knee and held out my hand instead.

"Oh, look at you, pretty girl. What's your name?"

I was enchanted. The little Dalmatian had a delicate, feminine face. She was wearing a red leather collar with a little medallion on it. I turned it over in my hand to read it. It was a St. Christopher's medal . . . said to protect children. How odd. Waiting with her head erect, ears cocked, she seemed to expect praise for her beauty. Warm chocolate brown eyes assessed me with more intelligence than my little brother. She had more black spots than I'd ever seen before. Her face was really freckled. On another dog, it might have been ugly, but this dog thought she was a princess.

"A peace offering, Mica. Will you accept it?" Sean's hand drifted to the dog's head, fingers unconsciously ruffling her fur. She looked back and forth between us as if to say, _I haven't got all day. It's cold out here._

Two pairs of incredibly beautiful eyes pled into mine; one blue and one brown. It took me less than a second to decide to keep her. She was beautiful and perfect. I was thrilled. I impulsively grabbed Sean's hand to thank him. A violent shock raced up my arm, heating my skin, vibrating through my chest in an instant. I flung his hand away like it was on fire.

"What the heck was that?" I rubbed the lingering tingles.

"Static electricity?" With a wince of his own, he stepped back an entire foot, and asked, "Do you think we could come inside for a minute? Angel's freezing out here."

"Sure, come on in." I waved them both inside and plopped down on the floor so I could pet Angel. Her fur was silky and smooth, and I rubbed her ear between my fingers. We sat nose to nose, getting to know each other. She was adorable.

Bemused at this unexpected gift, I murmured, "How did you know?"

Sean tipped his chin towards my jewelry box, expression softening with kindness. "I saw her tied up in front of the pound. The place was closed, and she was pathetic in the cold." He traced the shape of her muzzle, and she licked his hand. "I remembered your jewelry box from the other night, and well, I thought you might be good for each other." He ran his hand over her throat, fingering the St. Christopher's medallion. "I hope you don't mind."

The 101 Dalmatians jewelry box was a Christmas present from my mother. The porcelain Dalmatian was Perdita. It had been my favorite movie as a little kid. Mom had smiled in her quiet way as I yanked it out of the box. Never one to get too excited, she had broken into a rare, throaty laugh when I jumped up and hugged her. Hugging me back, she'd said, "I love you, sweetie."

That was our last Christmas together.

The poignant memory brought her face to mind, and I wished for the thousandth time that I resembled her in some way. Wishing didn't make it so. We looked nothing alike; she had wavy black hair and grey eyes. She was tall and thin with small breasts. I was much shorter and had brown hair and blue eyes. Our faces weren't even similar. Hers was oval; mine was heart shaped. Somehow, I'd gotten the small breasts gene though.

Tomorrow was the first anniversary of her death. I swallowed and cleared my throat, trying to stop the sudden overwhelming grief.

"What's the matter? Don't you like her?"

Not trusting myself to speak, I nodded my head, brushing a tear from my eye. Unfortunately, another quickly took its place, and soon I was crying rivers. Without thinking, I turned against him and sobbed my heart out. Tentatively wrapping his arms around me, he patted my back, trying to soothe as guys do. I sank into his heat and let him hold me. It had been forever since I'd been held, comforted, and I needed it more than I'd like to admit. My big, strong girl-power image was really a flimsy papier-mâché facade. It was a work in progress. Deep inside, I missed my mother. I was still afraid of Scott. I wouldn't admit that aloud, but the fear shadowed me. Grief still lingered and today wasn't the day to be strong. Today was a day to let myself feel the loss, feel the ache of needing her and knowing she would never be here for me again. So instead of moving away from Sean, I clung to his strength and let him hold me together until I could do it myself.

After a few minutes, the rivers turned to trickles and finally to sniffles. Something very warm pressed against my hip. I froze. What is—Ohhhh! Should I move? Should I ignore it? I didn't want to make a scene, but I wasn't ready for that kind of comfort. I surreptitiously wiped my nose on his sweater.

A deep groan interrupted my thoughts. Angel shifted position to lie on her back with her legs in the air—against my hip. Her mouth hung open, teeth shining, tongue lolling to the side. If a dog could laugh . . . I rolled my eyes and mentally smacked my forehead. It was the _dog_! Sean casually moved to put Angel between us, his posture wary as usual. My face was flushed with more than tears now. His lips quirked into the beginnings of a smile.

"Sean. This dog is no angel. Look at her—she's laughing at me! I'm giving her a new name as soon as I figure one out. And what's with the medallion? Who puts those things on a dog?"

That ghost of a smile vanished. Leaning towards me now, he released an oddly frustrated sigh. His face was only inches from mine as he seemed to grope for the right words with lowered eyes. The shadow of a beard accented his jaw, the outline of his lips. A spicy-woodsy cologne clung to the tanned skin of his throat. My mouth watered as he struggled. It wasn't my fault. He was delicious.

Ignoring my lustful gaze, he countered, "Don't you believe in signs? In fate? In destiny?"

"Um, no, not really."

"Maybe the medallion isn't for _her;_ maybe it was meant for _you_."

The hint was obvious but made no sense at all. I scoffed loftily, "That's crazy talk. I don't believe that. I don't need protection. I'm doing a good job of protecting myself. It's been months since I was attacked by any psycho people."

With a heavy sigh, he angled his head and tipped my chin up, fingers feathering over my skin before holding me still. I held my breath, parted my lips. A strange peacefulness settled over me. I leaned closer . . . any second now . . .

With his mouth hovering only inches away, he growled low in his throat, his voice rough with frustration, "We are _not_ in control of our destiny. Take all the help you can get."

And then he left.

Just like that. Gone.

As I watched the door close behind him, I marveled about three things. One, I somehow became a dog owner; two, my skin still tingled where Sean had touched me; and three, twice today, he passed up a chance to kiss me. Not that I wanted him too—but still.

"Come on, your majesty! Some of us have things to do today." I was holding the door open for her highness, Princess Domino. It was pouring down rain. She walked suspiciously to the door and peeked out. _Are you kidding me? I'll wait._

I booted her butt outside. "Sorry, dude, but I'm going out to play pool so you need to pee. It's for your own good."

I waited for her to pee and let her back inside. She came straight to me and shook out her fur. After I was good and wet, she walked over to my bed, hopped up onto my favorite pillow, made a circle and collapsed, as dogs do. _Oh, so warm and snuggly. Thanks, Mica. You have a good time tonight. Buh-bye!_

"Seriously?" I glared at her, and I swear she smiled back. Her tail thumped twice before she closed her eyes. I was dismissed.

I slipped on my favorite skinny jeans and added a tight t-shirt and a purple hoodie just as a horn honked out front. Ricki must be ready. I gave the princess an ear fondle and a kiss and locked the door behind me.

The place was warm and smoky inside. Out in the main room, Tyler, Kevin, Dani, and Aric had shown up and commandeered a table for us. The ancient juke box blasted out _Sober_ by Tool. I happily sang along with the depressing song. Tyler came bopping over with a huge grin on his face.

"You suck!" He thought he was Axl Rose. He had the red hair, but that was where the similarities ended.

Singing louder, I tapped out the drums on the edge of the table. "Jealous? You wish you were amazing like me." To emphasize my awesomeness, I smacked him in the arm.

Hooting a playful laugh, he smacked me back, a bit harder than I expected, and off the stool I went. Someone caught me under the arms before I hit the floor though. That someone chuckled warmly into my ear as he easily pulled me to my feet.

"Whoa, you don't have to throw yourself at me, darlin'. I like you just fine standin' up!"

Tall and lean, he seemed familiar. He had unruly blond hair and sparkling blue eyes that were creased into triangles of amusement. A crooked smile and dimples just added to his overall adorability. Now where did I know him from?

"I'm Declan, Sean's brother. Everybody just calls me Dec. I saw you at the ramps. Ring any bells now?" He had a lilt to his voice like Sean did. It was adorable.

His boyish smile was contagious. I found myself grinning up into his eyes. "Oh yeah and speak of the devil. There—" I announced as Dec whipped around.

"Where?" he asked seriously, cutting me off, head swiveling back and forth.

Sean sauntered up with a cocky grin. "I think she means me, Dec. It's cool."

Wow. He did things to jeans that should be illegal. And the way he moved? Like a cat. Every muscle rolling and flexing with grace and power. Too bad I didn't like him much. Nope, not much at all . . .

Swiping irritably at blond bangs hanging over his eye, Kevin positioned himself in front of me, interrupting my drooling. Trying for tough, he narrowed his blue eyes and thrust out his jaw. "Friends of yours, Mica?" He appraised the two guys with suspicion and a little hostility.

Tyler and Aric were alert too. Tyler's good-natured freckled face was creased with an uncharacteristic frown.

"Whoa! Yum!" Dani whispered loudly, fanning herself with a menu. She knew exactly who Sean was. She approved of him because she thought he had a positive aura. I didn't believe in auras but had to admit there was something about him that drew me closer. He had an energy that tugged at me every time I was near him. Probably only hormones. Lust? Definitely. Something mystical? Mmm . . . doubtful. He was a guy. Hot, yes, but only a guy.

Even with that relaxed expression in place, Sean still carried himself like a soldier, feet planted and shoulders back. He could break Tyler with his hands. He had a look about him that screamed _dangerous_. It made me sweat—in a good way. Dec, on the other hand, was a little shorter and a little thinner. The two were a contrast. Sean was dark while Dec was light. His hair was a streaky blond, but he had the same arresting blue eyes. His face was more boyish than Sean's. Even so, the lines of his face were lean and could easily go from relaxed to hard in a minute. Dec stood more loosely than Sean did, but he still looked like a soldier. There was a _readiness_ in them . . . Trying for subtlety, I glanced at my watch while scoping out their bodies.

Dani giggled and rolled her eyes towards Dec's butt, just in case I hadn't noticed its awesomeness. Their bodies were hard from work in the real world—they didn't have the half-hearted workout bodies that most guys had. No, they lived life in ways these small-town boys hadn't even dreamed of yet. My imagination went into hyper-drive. I could see both of them in uniforms holding automatic weapons. They were definitely different—and I was definitely interested. Our guys, as I thought of Kevin, Aric, and Tyler, were reacting to this new threat by posturing like the macho men they dreamed of being. Suddenly they were a little taller and tougher.

Ricki finally snorted with disgust, and said pointedly to Kevin, "Oh, chill out, already."

It was impossible not to laugh at the guys' disgruntled expressions. It broke the tension, and everyone relaxed. It was hard not to like Dec; he was hilarious and sweet. He seemed to find everything funny. We must be kindred spirits, him and I. As the night wore on, I noticed his gaze lingered on Dani whenever he thought no one was looking. Hmmm, that might be an interesting match. They'd have pretty babies together.

At the end of the night, I went to the ladies' room. Sean was waiting for me when I came out. The juke box boomed through the walls, its bass rattling a picture frame near my head. No one would hear me if I screamed. I swallowed the lump of fear in my throat and kept walking, hands suddenly cold. Not threatening, really, he leaned against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. He'd watched me all night but hadn't said much to me. Not unusual since he barely talked to me anyway. Conversation wasn't his strong suit. He'd commented on my pool skills once or twice and then ignored me. But every now and then my skin prickled, and I'd glanced up to find his eyes gleaming in my direction, his emotions cloaked. The intensity made me nervous and being alone in this dark hallway was freaking me out. I didn't know him that well and anyone could be deadly. I was buzzing with adrenaline when he peeled away from the wall.

"I'm scaring you, aren't I?" His mouth twisted into a grimace as he gestured at my clenched hands.

I forced my hands open and tried to play it off. "No, you don't scare me. I don't know what you're talking about." Lie, lie, lie.

"Look, I'm not trying to scare you. I'm not here to hurt you. I'm just . . ."

"What?"

He hesitated for a heartbeat before the fleeting concern in his eyes dimmed to nonchalance again. "I'm here to play pool. That's all."

That sounded like a lie—and a weak one at that. I put my hand on my hip, drawing his attention lower. "Really? That's it? You're here to play pool?" The ball of ice in my gut melted when I realized he was uncomfortable too. Feeling a little evil, I moved a foot closer to see how he'd react.

"You didn't come here to see me? Not at all?" I was crowding him, challenging those glowing eyes of his. Wait. _Glowing_? That can't be right. I blinked a couple of times, and the impression was gone.

He stepped back again. I wasn't having it this time. I advanced. He retreated, hands raised between us, irritation etched across his gorgeous face.

"Knock it off. What do you think you're playin' at?" His accent was heavy with the harshness of his voice.

"I'm outta here." I stalked away angrier than I should have been. Damn, stupid, pain-in-the-ass man.

That night I dreamed about Sean. This dream was different from the others. I was running down the long hallway with doors again. But this time, there was an open door with a gold sigil above it. I couldn't read the symbol, but I ran through the door anyway, only to fall screaming through cloud cover before landing on a foggy forest floor. A faint light shimmered in the distance, calling to me, drawing me forward. I was making progress at first but then stumbled over rocks and clutching branches. I could see the light beckoning . . . just out of reach. Suddenly a misshapen bulk appeared in front of me. With a surprised cry, I dodged to the side—right into Sean and an entirely new world.

Surrounded by mist and water, everything was green and lush. We were standing in a small pool edged with mossy rocks and purple orchids. The water was so clear I could see the sandy bottom. Sean was holding me against his bare chest, one palm cupping my breast, the other drifting over my shoulder blades. My head was flung back as he slowly dragged his mouth over my neck. My blood raced through my veins like a current, my entire body pulsing with heat. I was looking down at this sexy scene when his eyes snapped open and locked onto mine.

I was still gasping for air a few minutes later. What a dream! It was dark outside. I wasn't sure I could go back to sleep after that dream though. Whew! That was wicked hot. I wanted to jump back into that pool and . . . Domino stretched restlessly against my side and cracked an eye. _Do you mind?_ I was dozing off again when she stiffened. Growling low in her throat, she pushed herself to her feet, listening. I sat perfectly still with eyes on the alarm pad. It was armed. No one could _sneak_ inside—although it would be pretty easy to kill me before the police showed up. It was a very small apartment with limited hiding places. I didn't hear anything. Domino growled louder, showing teeth this time. She was serious.

Hefting a baseball bat, I pressed my ear against the outside wall, careful to stay away from the window. Domino launched herself in front of the door with her hackles raised. I still didn't hear anything, but I trusted her instincts. Something was up. The slam of a car door scared me even more. This was not good. Damn it. The sound of tires squealing sent both of us running to the window. What the hell?

Domino had stopped growling, but her lip was curled in a warning snarl. I peeked out of the blinds—nothing. I peeked out of the peephole—nothing.

"Well, what's the matter, dog? You're freaking me out."

She pointed her nose at the door and cocked one ear. _I'll handle this._

"Okay, fine, but if you get eaten by a zombie, don't blame me!"

I let her out, and she bolted to my car, barking madly. I didn't want to, but I followed her with the bat. There wasn't anyone else there. Domino was sniffing all around the car though, probably taking DNA samples. It was uncanny—she started at the front end, methodically working around the whole car. She stopped right next to the tire that had a screwdriver stuck in it.

"Are you frickin' kidding me? Just great!" I searched the street, but whoever did it was long gone. Damn it.

Later that morning, I was sitting at the kitchen table in the main house, sulking into my cereal when my dad came down.

"Hey, kiddo. What's the matter? You look bummed."

That was an understatement. "Some freak flattened my tire this morning, Dad. It was about 4:30. Domino woke me up. What am I supposed to do with it?"

"Flattened your tire? Was that all? Damn it! Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I had the alarm on and Domino's there. Plus, your old bat." I put on a brave face.

Dad ran through the video tape and called the cops. The cameras captured the shadowy shapes of two guys and their car. Unfortunately, we couldn't see the license plate. Even though I couldn't see their faces, I knew one of the guys. He didn't need a face for me to recognize him. His body was burned into my nightmares. It was Scott Flynn. I told the police what I could and took a shower. Dad would help me get my tire changed later. Right now, I needed some air. The walls were closing in. I threw my hair up in a ponytail and grabbed the leash.

I started to feel normal again around our fifth mile. I found my happy place somewhere around mile three. As crazy as it sounds, I ran for the joy of it. I was walking a cool-down block when a car pulled alongside. I checked it out from the corner of my eye, finger on the pepper spray. Domino was tugging the leash with happiness—it was Sean. She was madly in love with him and wasn't at all ashamed. She wagged her whole butt in joy. She had no dignity. He pulled into the park and got out.

Uh-oh. Now what? In soldier-mode today, he stood stiffly, scanning the park, lips pressed in a line. The dark scowl alone would send babies screaming for their mothers. It sent a warning trickling through my blood. What was he looking for? Russian agents? Terrorists? Leprechauns? Satisfied that we were alone, he pushed me towards a bench with his hand on my lower back and the other wrapped around my wrist. I bristled a bit at the manhandling. Who did he think he was?

I tried to pry my hand loose. " _Excuse_ me? What is your problem?"

" _My_ problem? Let's talk about _your_ problem. I just talked to your dad. What were you thinking? Why would you go outside in the dark like that? You could've been attacked again."

"I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself. You don't have to worry."

"But I _do_ worry. I worry a lot." Something in his expression made me warm all over. His voice was curt, but his eyes were tight with real concern.

"You're cutting off the circulation to my hand. Do you mind?"

"No, I don't mind at all if it gets your attention." Instead of letting go of my wrist, he loosened his hold and eased down on the bench, taking me with him. "What's it going to take to get you to be more careful? It's like you've got a target on your back."

"First off, it's called vandalism and it's not that unusual. The cops will take care of it. Do I like it? No. I'm not happy about it either. But I can't do much about some assholes stabbing my car."

He released my hand and dragged his fingers over the top of his head in a familiar gesture of annoyance. The muscles in his arms flexed with the motion, drawing my attention to his shoulders. Broad, hard, probably golden brown under the t-shirt he wore, they were made for snuggling against. My imagination was helpfully stripping off said shirt and filling in the details of his skin. My heart was doing little flip flops because I was actually happy to see him. Uh-oh, those were bad signs. Okay, so maybe he wasn't just a _guy_ to me. He was an enigma that I wanted to unravel. Simple as that. Time to go while I still had some dignity.

Sean stepped away from me and warned, "This isn't over, you know. He's going to keep coming for you. It's in his nature." He locked his eyes to mine and added, "I can help you with him."

Help me? How? Was he offering to kill Scott? The hard set of his face made me wonder. My heart picked up its beat. "Thanks for that cheery thought, but I think the police can handle it. Look, I've got to get to work. Do you want to meet us at Giant Mountain tomorrow? We're hiking. Maybe you can protect me from the bears?"

His lips curved into something close to a genuine smile. "I'll see what I can do."

The drive to Giant Mountain was a pretty one. Ricki volunteered to drive, and I happily rode shotgun. Signs of spring were all around us. Trees were sprouting new green leaves. The rivers would be running high with snow melt. I was a little sorry we weren't going to be on the water, but I would settle for hiking the mountain. The forest was home. I felt a sense of peacefulness that I didn't feel anywhere else. I wanted to run through the woods and climb to the top of this mountain—I hoped the rest of my friends could keep up.

"Did you bring condoms?" Ricki chuckled with a snort at her cleverness.

Jumping at the sound of her voice, I snorted too. "Geez, woman! No, I did not!" Though the idea had possibilities, the potential wearer wasn't cooperating. "Besides, he's not interested in me like that. You've seen him. He practically ignores me half the time."

Grinning evilly, she said, "Yeah, but the other half of the time, he looks at you like you're lunch! God, he's hot. He's got a fabulous ass. You've got to reel that one in!" Pausing to nibble her lip, she added thoughtfully, "Now, Killian . . . mmm. He's more my type. Wicked hot and dangerous."

"Yeah, he's dangerous all right. Like a bomb! One wrong move and you'll lose body parts. You can have that one. He's too hot for me. I'll just keep dibs on Sean."

"You got it. Do you think Killian will be there?" Sucking her finger seductively, she shivered for dramatic effect. "I want to throw him into a cave and . . ." Winking at my gaping mouth, she popped her finger out like a cork.

Giggling in spite of my shock, I said, "You're so nasty! Geez!"

Killian was another friend of Sean's. He made such rare appearances in town that he was almost a myth. He was kind of like Bigfoot. If you had a Killian sighting, people thought you were drunk or something. Still, Ricki was right. The man was wicked delicious despite the mystery that surrounded him. A little later we pulled onto the side of the road by the trailhead. Aric, Dani, and Tyler pulled up behind us. There was only one other vehicle there. Dec waved enthusiastically. Unable to resist the magic of his dimples, I waved back. Tons more reserved, Sean raised a hand in a half wave. No Killian. Ricki sighed dramatically. She narrowed her eyes in speculation as she mentally appraised Dec.

I elbowed her. "Forget it! He's too sweet for you. You'd give him a heart attack!"

Dani glided over to us, and we headed into the trees. Tyler and Aric forged ahead like they had a speed record to break and were soon out of view. Ricki and Dani dawdled along like they had all day. Impatient with their speed, I finally broke away, taking off up the trail by myself. Sean and Dec hung together behind me. Sean still hadn't said anything to me, and I was content to ignore him. He was one small person in this huge wilderness. There'd be time to talk later. Right now, I had a mountain to conquer!

Barking randomly, Domino turned into a sheepdog, spending her time running back and forth between our little groups. She was crazy with joy as she loped beside us, occasionally grabbing at stalks of grass with her teeth. There was a long green stem hanging from her mouth when she raced past me again. I had to laugh at her because she acted like I felt inside. I would've wagged my tail too, if I had one. It was an amazing place. The trail cut through trees and over little streams. Huge granite boulders were randomly plopped here and there courtesy of the last ice age. Some giant had tossed them around for us to climb on, and no two were alike. Some were bare and grey while others were covered with lichen or bright green moss. Occasionally water trickled down their sides and shimmered in stray beams of sunlight. It was a magical place. There should be wood nymphs and trolls roaming around.

I eventually caught up to Tyler and Aric. They couldn't contain their inner-billy goat and climbed to the top of every big rock they found. When I paused to catch my breath, Dec slipped back to join Dani and Ricki. Echoes of his laughter floated on the wind that whistled through the trees. Every now and then I caught the tinkling of Dani's giggles too. That was interesting . . .

I stopped at a cleft in a gigantic tumble of granite. It was almost big enough to walk through. No way was I venturing into the pitch blackness inside. As cold air drifted over my skin, I peered into the opening. What lived here? Bears? No, probably not. More likely foxes or something smallish . . . I felt him before he spoke.

"Too small for bears," Sean said smugly.

"Oh, you think you're so smart, don't you?"

"You're not that hard to read." He wasn't smiling, but he looked like he wanted to. I wished I could make him smile for me. What would it take?

For the rest of the day he played shadow with me, stopping when I did, pacing me as I explored. He didn't say a lot, but I didn't mind. There was something about him. I tried to ignore him, but I was completely aware of every move he made. He gave off such energy . . . A vitality that was hard to ignore. I could almost feel vibrations coming from him. My skin prickled when he passed near; my pulse picked up its pace. He drew me like a magnet that I was struggling to resist. I peered at him now. He looked so . . . powerful, bigger than life, a predator. He was sitting on a rock with his face dappled by sunlight. His eyes were half-closed, a jaguar sunning itself. He seemed like he was relaxing, but I sensed his watchfulness. He wasn't dozing at all; he was scanning the woods around us. Was he guarding or hunting? He caught me staring and straightened with a knowing look. I blushed and glanced away.

Finally exhausted, Domino threw herself down in a thick patch of grass, panting happily while I soaked my feet in a deliciously cold bubbling stream. Taking a cue from Sean, I closed my eyes to worship the sun. A splash of icy water on my face startled me upright with a girly squeak and a mad search for bears.

No bears, just Dec. He was standing close enough to splash me with another handful of water. I jumped up to get out of the way when the next splash hit me in the chest. Oh, it's on! I scooped up my own handful of water and threw it at Dec. He crowed with laughter when it missed him and caught Sean instead. The others found us and an epic water battle began.

I was still fizzing with laughter on the way back down the mountain. We were a ragged-looking group. Everyone was wet and muddy. Dani was profoundly put out as she tried in vain to dry off without a single dry piece of fabric.

"I can't believe you people," she griped.

Aric put his arm around her, and soothed, "You'll live, babe."

Dec caught up to me and shook himself like a wet dog. I tried to jump away from him and stumbled over a root growing across the trail. Going down on one knee with a yelp, I flailed my arms to keep my balance. Instead of keeping my balance, I slid into a loose patch of leaves that gave way into the side of the embankment. With a muffled squeak of surprise, I went tumbling over the edge, dragging Dec with me. We bounced and slid at least fifty feet before landing on firmer ground in a final messy skid. I ended up on my face in the wet leaves. Dec fell on top of me with a heavy grunt. Stars flew around my head as I blinked into the dirt.

"Get off!" I grunted, pushing at his shoulders. Shoving harder, I inhaled with relief when he pushed himself up to his elbows. Turning around so I could breathe, I ended up wedged between his surprisingly heavy body and the soft ground . . . most of which was in my mouth. Ewww . . . I spit a mouthful of dirt out.

Eyes brimming with laughter, he thumbed dirt from the top of my lip, saying, "Nice job, darlin'."

Voices called down from the cliff above. Ricki yelled something I couldn't understand, but Sean's words were clear.

"Dec? Are you guys okay?"

Dec cocked his head. After a second, he shouted, "We're okay! We'll be there in a minute."

I measured the width of his shoulders with my dirty palms, commenting, "I had no idea you were so heavy. Are you going to get up or squish me to death?"

Leaning his weight to the side, he sprang to his feet like a cat before hauling me upright and slapping leaves off my back. I let him, since I was busily spitting the dirt out of my mouth and digging it out of my ears and hair. God only knew what _I_ looked like. _He_ looked wretched, and I felt a small stab of guilt.

"Come over here, you. You're a mess." I plucked leaves and broken twigs out of his hair. He had broad smears of black dirt all over him, including his adorable face. Looking around for some water, I spotted my backpack. The water bottle was nearly empty, but there was enough. After rinsing my mouth, I handed it to Dec.

"I'm sorry, Dec. It was an accident."

"So what did you want to talk about?" he asked as he circled me, peering interestedly at my body.

"What do you mean? Nothing!" I felt naked and backed away from him. "What are you doing?"

"Oh, relax. I'm just checking to see if you're bleeding! You're so suspicious! Do I look dangerous to you?"

"Well, no. But looks can be deceiving," I muttered uncomfortably. "Come on. We're going to have to walk around the base of the cliff before we can get back to the trail on top."

Easily pacing me, he surprised me by reaching out and taking my hand. No one could see us from above, but he angled us to the back of a tree to be sure the view was blocked. Serious now, he smiled very gently, his eyes soft with apology.

"Sweetheart, I'm so sorry. That was profoundly insensitive of me. I know what you've been through."

He was so sincere I nearly cried. "It's okay, Dec."

"Forgive me?"

One deep dimple made an appearance, and I caved. "Of course, I do. Who could say no to the dimples? So while I have your undivided attention . . ."

A knowing grin creased his face. "Here it comes. Go ahead. Ask me. I know you want to."

Unable to help it, I started to laugh again. He really was incorrigible. "Fine! What's the deal with Sean?"

We started to pick our way along, admittedly making our own trail, but down was down—we'd get there eventually.

"Sean likes you, but—"

"But what? Does he have a girlfriend someplace?" I knew it! No one that good-looking was single! It figured. It made perfect sense. Ugh.

"Don't be stupid. Does he act like someone who has a girlfriend?" Pointing his chin towards the trail above us, he added, "It's not that. It's complicated. We've got . . . uh, family issues. We might have to leave to help our . . . family take care of some things. He just doesn't want to get serious with anybody right now." His sunny expression clouded over and he dropped the playful tone. "That's probably a good idea."

He was lying. But it was close to the truth. His story had the right nuances without any facts to make it completely believable. Hmm. Very interesting. Those huge blue eyes stayed locked with mine, and I wanted to believe him. The more I stared into his eyes, the more I _wanted_ to believe him.

Of course, he was telling the truth. Why would he lie?

Still moving along, he lifted me up and over a rock that blocked my way. He had an easy personality. Everything about Dec was warm and fun. He was like a puppy—you had to like him.

"So he likes me?" I asked out of the blue twenty minutes later.

Draping his arm loosely around my shoulders, Dec kissed the side of my cheek just as we rounded a bend and popped out onto the main trail. We had an audience. Dec coughed with a strangled laugh as Sean's eyes narrowed instantly.

With a great show of holding me up, he bent his head and begged, "Do me a favor, darlin', and limp a bit for Sean's temper." Much louder, he said, "We're almost there, and you can sit down."

Catching the suspicious gleams in Sean's and Ricki's eyes, I stumbled heavily into Dec's side. He shocked all of us when he scooped me up in his arms.

"Oh, yeah, this'll make him soooo much happier!" I whispered in between helpless giggles.

Hefting me easily, he bounced me a couple of times before settling me against his muddy chest. "That's what he gets for being jealous!"

After eyeballing us closely, Ricki asked, "Are you okay? Did you hurt . . . anything?" Her eyes twinkled with mischief as she took in the tan skin visible through the huge tear in his t-shirt. Half of his stomach was showing, and he _did_ have nice abs.

When we got to the cars, Ricki looked at Domino's wet, muddy fur and asked if anyone had a blanket to cover her seats. Oh, crap, I didn't even think about that; Ricki's car had cloth seats. In the end, the dog and I rode back with Sean and Dec. Domino curled up on the leather backseat with Dec, and they were both asleep in minutes. I was all out of witty conversation so I pretended to sleep most of the way back. I kept my head turned away from the driver's side since I kept breaking into a cheesy grin. Sean was jealous? Hmmm. Very, very interesting . . . Sean glanced at me every now and then but didn't break the silence.

# Chapter 5: Seduction?

LAKE CHAMPLAIN WAS A VERY BIG LAKE that stretched between New York and Vermont. Lots of little pine-covered islands dotted the water and I loved exploring these little bits of isolation. Spring had finally warmed to summer and the weather was perfect for getting out on the water. After knowing Sean for the past six months, I couldn't deny that I liked him. He was a mystery though. Who was he? What was he really doing here? My instincts screamed _run away_! He was more than I could handle. But my heart beat faster every time I saw him. There was something sad in those serious blue eyes that intrigued me, made me want to dig deeper. My body reacted every time he was near. I arced towards him like iron to a magnet. I couldn't resist his pull. I didn't want to. But what should I do about it? I'd given this some thought and finally come up with a plan of attack. Let's call it Plan C.

Today Sean and I were going off alone. It was the first time we would spend the day together without company. I begged him to take me out on his sailboat, _Mystic_ , the minute I heard he had one. He'd made excuses for a month now, but I finally talked him into it. By the time I used all of my charm, he had no choice. The universe seemed to agree with my plan. His friends were out of town someplace and wouldn't be around to chaperone. My friends didn't dare ask to come with us. The weather was cooperating too. The sky was perfectly blue with a breeze. It was going to be hot today. I was counting on that.

The lake sparkled as we cut through the water. Domino was leaning into the breeze with her ears flapping gently. She was in Heaven. I scratched her between her shoulders, and she licked my face. Sean was focused on the view ahead of us. He seemed to be taking us into the open water. Oh, no, no, no. That would not work. We need to park.

He jumped when I came up behind him. "Sean, see that little cove? It's so cute. Can we go check it out? Pretty please?" I batted my eyelashes for good measure.

"I thought we'd cruise a little further down the lake before we stopped anywhere." His jaw seemed tight, tense. He forced a smile that didn't erase the shadow of pain that lingered in his eyes.

I tried to pout, but it was hard to hold back the urge to laugh. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I'm sure." He was looking straight ahead, refusing to make eye contact and gripping the wheel with white knuckles.

Fine. He could be that way. I was expecting this. I would have to play dirty to break him down. So I gave his hand a little squeeze and smiled with full firepower.

"Okay, you win, for now."

I went to the front of the boat. He couldn't avoid seeing me if he wanted to keep steering it. When I started peeling off my t-shirt, the boat lurched a bit. Probably it took me five full minutes to peel off my shirt and shorts. I did a lot of stretching afterwards. My bikini could not have been smaller. It was a simple suit. It was a deep purple with tiny little straps and push up cups. My breasts were doing their best to escape. There was no way he could miss them. I stretched out on a blanket and put in my earphones. The sun would shimmer off of the coconut oil I was slowly rubbing over my arms. I was wearing very dark sunglasses so I could watch him. Oh, he was definitely trying not to look. It was funny to see him struggling with the urge. What I didn't get was why he was holding back. I could tell he liked me. He did everything he could to avoid getting close, though. I was breaking him down with relentless dedication. Today I was bringing out the big guns.

After a little while, I noticed the boat turn towards a secluded cove. I perked up. Was my plan working? I did my best to look sexy. I made sure he was looking before dragging my long hair across my shoulders. Our eyes met. His were bleak as he stared at me. I didn't understand the expression but smiled wickedly at the smell of victory.

After anchoring the boat, he hesitated for a minute, seemingly torn, and looked skyward. I held out my hands, and he took the first steps that would change my life forever.

Resigned, he reached out, and I tugged him to the deck. Oddly hesitant, he hovered above me while I leaned back on the blanket. His eyes searched mine. They were that shade of ocean that I wanted to drown in. He was trying to tell me something, but all I could see was infinity in those eyes. I wanted to follow him anywhere. He held my gaze, challenging me to break the connection. I couldn't drop my eyes. I was suddenly very aware of a power in him I had only vaguely sensed before. A trickle of fear crawled between my shoulder blades. But it was far too late for second thoughts.

Sean was resting on his elbows above me. The hard muscle of his chest brushed against my breasts; his thighs pressed mine, until we were touching from head to toe. Every nerve in my body twitched, crying out for him. I wanted to run my hands over his bare shoulders, but I couldn't move. I was paralyzed and hypnotized. The seconds dragged; the silence broken only by my heartbeat thudding in my ears. Still, he watched me, eyes on mine, as if he were trying to see into my soul.

My thoughts exploded like fireworks. Every memory, every thought I'd had about him raced through my head until I made a startling discovery—somewhere along the way, I'd fallen in love with him.

He stroked my lower lip with the pad of his thumb, those beautiful lips of his curling into the barest hint of a smile. Leaning close, he dragged his mouth over the shape of my face once, twice, and again, before whispering against my lips, "If I look into your heart, Mica, what will I find?"

Mesmerized, lost, I whispered, "You. Only you."

His mouth came down on mine in a kiss that stopped my heart. A current passed through my lips to my toes. I vibrated with it, desperate to arch against him, needing to touch him, to sink into him, but I still couldn't move. I lay in beautiful agony as his lips moved over mine, his tongue sweeping into my mouth, tasting, stroking, demanding a response. Tiny lights sparkled behind my eyes as a tidal wave of need crashed through me. I want more than kisses, more than this. I want everything he can give me. With a groan, he wrapped his arms around me, dragging me tightly against him, skin to skin, heart to heart. Every inch of me was pulsing with the need to move closer. My skin was too tight and too hot, raw and exposed. My heart was skipping beats, and I couldn't quite catch my breath. The sensation turned to pain, and I moaned against his lips. He dragged his mouth away and laid his forehead against my shoulder, his breathing ragged, heart thumping. Raw power surged through him, and my instincts were screaming again, _run, run!_ I was getting in _way_ over my head here, but I didn't have the will to move—didn't _want_ to move—I was shaking inside. He lifted his head, looking down at me, his expression somber, eyes dark with emotion. I felt naked and vulnerable. I lowered mine.

He pressed a soft kiss on each of my eyelids, murmuring, "It's too late for that now, Mica. We've already crossed the line. I've seen what's in your heart. There's no reason to hide."

I opened my eyes. The sun bathed him in a beautiful golden glow. This time when I tried to arch against him, my body obeyed. His mouth moved over my neck, nibbling, tasting my skin before slanting over my lips once more. The strange current passed through me again, a hot rush of power that curled my toes. This time, I didn't fear it. I relished it. It was intoxicating as it sang through my veins, making me light and weightless. I wanted more. I wanted to float away in it. My fingers were digging into his back when everything went black.

"Wake up, Sleeping Beauty."

My eyes popped open at once. I blinked in the sunlight, disoriented. Domino was stretched out on the blanket with me, regally surveying the shore. Sean hauled me upright with a gentle tug. I expected him to immediately step back like he usually did, but this time he didn't. Instead, he held me at arms' length, strong fingers entwined with mine, pressed to his heart.

"Regrets, Mica?" His eyes were unreadable in the bright light, but a tic jumped in his jaw.

"What did you do to me?"

"You're avoiding the question."

"So are you."

Neither of us was willing to answer the question so we called a truce. The rest of the afternoon went by in a blur. We went ashore on a quiet little island. I brought a picnic basket, and we sat and nibbled on the fruit and cheeses. There was a shy feeling between us now. I wanted to ask how he felt about the kiss on the boat, but I was afraid he might regret it. He asked if I had regrets. I did, but probably not the kind he was thinking about. I regretted . . . what exactly? That we didn't go further? That I fell asleep somewhere along the way? That I didn't tell him I loved him? That he didn't tell me he loved me? If I was being honest, I would admit to all of the above. I should be freaked out, but I wasn't. Deep down inside, I knew this was meant to be. No matter what happened now, I would not regret that strange intimacy I had with Sean.

The sun was getting lower across the water. We probably needed to head back, but I didn't want this time to end. I must have looked disappointed because he came over to sit on the blanket. He pulled my back against his chest. Domino curled against his side, head resting on the top of his foot. We sat there in silence, but it was a comfortable one. He kissed the top of my head, and I felt hope for the first time in many months.

# Chapter 6: Disclosure

I TRIED TO KEEP it on the down low—really, I did. What we had was so personal I didn't want anyone to know. My emotions were all over the place and I was a sappy love-ridden wreck. I wasn't ready to share these new feelings with the world, but it was impossible to hide the change. Our friends noticed something was going on as soon as they saw us together. I lit up like a candle when I saw his face, and he gave up trying to fight his attraction to me. He spent his time with me, and everyone knew we weren't just friends. _My_ friends approved because they knew what I had gone through, and Sean was gentle with me. I glowed with nauseating happiness every time he was around. What friend wouldn't approve of that?

On the other hand, Dec and Killian _did not_ approve. Dec seemed amused by the whole thing and treated me like a little sister but gave Sean a hard time when he thought I wasn't listening. He didn't approve, but he accepted us. The mythical asshat Killian was clearly angry with both of us. His shitty attitude surrounded him like a black cloud. Earlier this year he'd been gone all the time, but now he seemed to be in town more and more often. I could've gone my entire life without ever seeing him again though. For some reason, he spent his time glaring at me and bitching at Sean. I didn't understand what his problem was. He acted like I wasn't good enough for Sean, and that really hurt. Tonight, we were playing pool downtown, and I was ready to murder Killian. He'd been scowling at me since he got here. Waves of annoyance seemed to float around him.

My voice dripped with exasperation when I finally snapped, " _What_ is your _problem_?"

Killian's eyebrows jumped up and he slammed his cue onto the table. " _My_ problem? It's not _my_ problem you should be worried about. You have no idea what you're messing with. You're in way over your head, little girl."

He stalked out before I could respond. Confused, I turned to Sean and Dec for answers. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Cursing under his breath, Sean grouched, "Ignore him. He's being a dick. I'll talk to him later."

Dec forced a smile and tried to smooth things over. "He's got issues. Don't worry about him."

"Issues? What kind of—" Oh, fabulous. This night keeps getting better and better.

Scott and two of his friends had just sauntered in through the side door. Perfect timing. I'd been dreading this moment for a week now. Officer Halliwell had called us to let us know Scott was released early for good behavior. The state was too broke to hang on to such a model prisoner. Sean spotted Scott and crossed his arms with a dangerous gleam in his eyes. If Scott and his friends were street thugs, Sean and Dec were mercenaries. They stood, backs to the wall, sizing up the three thugs. My money was on them. They looked like they could rip the other guys into little pieces.

Scott spoke first. "So Mica, I see you're still skanking around town. This your latest fuck-buddy?" He sized up Sean, and added snidely, "She's good isn't she, man? I wouldn't mind taking another crack at that."

One of Scott's friends decided to chime in. "Dude, I'm gonna take a piece of that after we kick the shit out of these two pussies here."

Sean smiled, showing both canines, and suggested in a friendly tone that sent chills down my spine, "Why don't we go outside? I don't want to get blood all over the bar." He was already heading out the door before I could react.

My face went white. This was not good. Dani called for Aric and Kevin. Why couldn't Scott just leave me alone? He was such a dick. I was tired of being afraid of him; at this point, I would _help_ kick his ass.

Dani and I careened into the alley just in time to see Scott and Sean squaring off. Dec stood guard with arms crossed over his chest, daring the others to jump in. The cocky one made a kissing sound at me. Ricki growled like the good friend she is. I shushed her and patted my purse. I was carrying concealed now . . . My new stun gun would discourage Scott's friends, and if it didn't, well, they'd be pissing their pants on the dirty ground. Either way, I win.

Scott threw a punch at Sean's face that caught him in the cheek. I winced at the sound. Sean didn't even flinch. I couldn't bear to watch, but I couldn't look away either. From the beginning, Sean was in complete control. He moved with the precision and speed of a trained fighter. It was _not_ a fair fight. Scott was strong but clumsy, throwing himself at Sean, hoping to take him down with sheer brutality. After the first blow, he didn't land another shot. Sean worked him over with cold precision. The other thugs sized up him up and decided against getting involved. Dec's expression turned mocking as he looked hopefully at the two guys. With wary expressions, they stood back and watched their buddy get the shit kicked out of him.

Scott was a mess. His face was bleeding from his nose, cuts above his eye, and one cheekbone. His gut had to be killing him. I was hoping for a few cracked ribs. He finally staggered to one side and collapsed to his knees. Sean raised his boot to kick him when Killian appeared out of nowhere.

"Sean! He's down! You've made your point." He glared around the alley, daring anyone to step in. No one said a word.

Ricki dug her nails into my arm with a sharp inhale. "Oh, my freakin' God!"

I couldn't argue. He _was_ fierce . . .

Grabbing Scott by the shirt and shoving him into his startled friend, Sean snarled in a rough voice, "Get this piece of shit out of my sight before I finish this permanently. And you, dirt bag, you might want to reconsider _taking a piece of that_ if you want to keep your dick attached to your body." The guy backed away, face white. Sean shot him a feral smile that was anything but happy. "Just some friendly advice."

The whole fight had taken less than three or four minutes, and the cops hadn't made it there yet. Aric and Kevin regarded Killian and Sean with a cross between fear and respect. They backed out of the alley as the sound of sirens closing in broke the tension. We scattered and ran to the cars. In the confusion, Sean grabbed my hand and yanked me behind another store's fence. He swung me around and kissed me hard. My head filled with little flashing lights as the current that was Sean coursed through my blood.

He must have been riding on some wave of testosterone because he was determined to stay in my apartment with me. "Mica, I don't trust those guys. They're not going to give up."

I had no arguments that made sense. The truth was I was a wreck. My emotions were all over the place. I didn't want to be alone in the dark. I didn't want to face the nightmares that would surely come. They always did when I ran into _him_. I would get very little sleep once the dreams started. Sean could protect me, and I needed him tonight. With a light tug of his hand, I led the way through my door.

We lay on the bed with Domino between us, talking until late in the night. We talked about everything and nothing at all. Eventually I dozed off, and the dream came back. I was running through the endless hallways again, but this time I could clearly see Scott's face behind me. He was carrying the hunting knife. I was screaming as usual. But this time I was screaming at him to come and get me. I stopped to face him with a gun in my hand. I was ready to fight back.

"Baby, wake up. You're dreaming." Sean shook me awake.

I snuggled against him, grateful to let the dream fade. "Can I ask you something?"

He trailed his fingers down my arm, tracing the faint greenish veins on the inside of my wrist. "You can ask me anything."

"Okay, then. What are you doing here?"

"Lying in bed with a gorgeous creature . . . What kind of question is that?"

"No, not _here,_ I mean here, in town. You and your friends . . . you aren't like the other people around here. They're all so _country_. That's not who you are."

He pulled away from me and sat up, face closed. "That must've been some dream. I'm not anything special, Mica. Don't make too much out of me."

"But what about the fight? You've had training, I can tell. And your accent? Come on, Killian is like this military commando guy. He probably kills people for fun. Say what you want to, but you aren't from around here."

He didn't respond. I let the silence stretch for as long as I could stand it before throwing my hands up and demanding, "Give me a break! I'm not an idiot."

He was pacing by the window, but finally sat down beside me. "Fine. But this is the part where I swear you to secrecy and you vow to keep this to yourself until you die." He grinned into my eyes and I exhaled in relief.

Drawing an X over my heart, I promised, "Cross my heart, hope to die. Now spill your guts, secret agent man."

He opened his mouth to say something, but then shot me a queer look instead. "Secret agent man? You've got a crazy imagination, you know that, right? Nothing that exotic—we're here because of our parents. A few years ago, they were targeted in a terrorist attack just outside of London. They requested political asylum in the U.S. and moved here right after. Even though we're old enough to live on our own, they were worried we'd be targeted as a way to get to them so we moved here too. It's only for a few years. Eventually we'll probably head back to the U.K."

"Oh, my God! That's terrible! What kind of attack? Why would someone target them?"

"It wasn't just them, but the organization they work for. They do biological research. My father is an engineer—Dec's mother is a scientist—Killian's father is another scientist. They're working on sensitive projects so we keep our identities quiet. That's really all I can tell you." He shrugged and ran his fingers over his jaw. "I don't know much more than that."

"So what are your parents doing here now? Are they still doing research?"

"I can't talk about that. Let's just say they are in and out of the country a lot so the three of us stick together. Dec and I agreed to go to college here until we can move again."

"Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

"Not biological ones, no. But I think of Dec as my little brother. We've hung out since we were pretty young, and I try to keep him on a short leash, but you know him. He's always doing something."

Dec was a clown, and I wished he was _my_ brother.

"What about Killian?" I couldn't imagine him as _anyone's_ brother. I wasn't even sure he was human!

A shadow passed over his eyes. "Uh, Killian's complicated. He's important—just like you are." He paused, looking oddly regretful.

I reached over to squeeze his fingers. I didn't like to see anyone sad, but I was a definite sucker for puppies and black-haired, blue-eyed Irishmen named Sean. We sat for a long time, each lost in our own thoughts. My head was swimming with this new Sean. Some truth at last! He explained the accent and the secrecy, but that didn't really explain everything . . . I thought back to the video tapes from the night I got home so mysteriously. Then there was the strange energy that surrounded him. There was definitely something more to him than he was telling me. But for now, I would pretend to believe it and see what happens. I would have to hope he didn't read minds.

As if on cue, Domino thumped her tail against my leg. I glanced over at Sean to find his eyes closed. Was he sleeping? His normal fierceness was gone and in its place was a gentleness that was surprising. A rush of emotion brought a lump to my throat. I stared at his hand in mine—it was heavy with sleep, fingers long and beautifully shaped—a sprinkling of fine, black hair was scattered at the wrist. Hesitant to wake him, I stroked it softly. He hadn't moved so I traced the muscle in his forearm, marveling at the blood pulsing close to the surface. That was funny. I'd never noticed that before. I considered my own arm; did _my_ skin feel that way?

His fingers twitched against my palm. I held my breath. Oh, please don't wake up! I'm not done exploring yet! He relaxed again. Unable to resist the urge, I got really bold and ran the back of my hand along his arm. The fine hairs were soft against my hand. Once again, I could almost feel his blood surging like a river beneath his skin. Suddenly my fingertips started tingling. I rubbed them together, enjoying the sensation . . . oddly numb. Puzzled, I dropped my eyes to his arm for clues, and nearly fell off the damn bed in shock. Sean's entire body was surrounded by a soft golden haze like a halo. I blinked several times, but the faint light was still there—and it was getting brighter by the second. What the hell?

Sean's eyes snapped open in a startling blaze of blue fire.

Yelping in shock, I launched myself off of the bed. His hand flew out to grab me before I fell. I didn't see him move. He reeled me in until we were up close and personal.

Nose to nose, he growled, "Oh, no you don't. You've been playing with fire."

I tried to squirm away, but his grip was like steel. I wasn't going anywhere. I tried to wrench my wrist away and just managed to hurt myself. He was still tense, but his face was under control again. He didn't look capable of setting me on fire with his eyes anymore. Surely that was a good sign?

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to wake you up, or . . . whatever. You were so warm I couldn't resist touching you. I'm sorry." I really, really was. And scared out of my mind. Yep. That too.

Taking a deep breath, he sighed like a man praying for patience. After another second of staring into my eyes, he scrubbed his fingers through his hair, making it stand up in spikes like a porcupine. I stifled a smile. The worst must be over. He didn't seem mad, and hey, he wasn't glowing anymore. That was a relief.

His face went through a series of expressions so quickly that I almost burst out laughing in spite of the weirdness I had just witnessed—anger, frustration, guilt—then, finally, resignation and grudging amusement. When he next spoke, his harsh voice was smooth again with his sexy, Irish lilt. "Mica, darlin', I don't know what to do with you. You're making me crazy!"

I wriggled my hand, mumbling, "Yeah, well, if you're not going to set me on fire, could I have my wrist back? I think I sprained it."

The faraway growl of thunder woke me out of a heavy sleep. Groggy, I looked at the clock—it was 4:00 in the afternoon—I'd been sleeping for probably twelve hours. When did Sean leave? My stomach growled like a swarm of bees. Yeah, yeah, you're hungry; stop nagging. I got up to let Domino out, but she wasn't there. Wandering to the bathroom, I called her. Nope, she's not in here. Where was she? I threw on some shorts and started for the door when I saw a note from Sean. He didn't want Domino to wake me up today so he took her with him. He had to work but would bring her back tonight. Perfect! I wasn't done grilling him just yet. I was in the opening stages of my interrogation when I fell asleep last night. I had more questions for my mystery man.

I was about to go to the house for some food when the rain started coming down in sheets. Lightning flashed through the window, and the thunder was deafening. It sounded like a hurricane. The light flickered but stayed on. I groaned out loud. I'm starving to death in here, and as I'm made of sugar, I can't risk the rain. I settled for a granola bar and an apple. The mini-fridge was almost empty. I had some fruit and a couple of bottles of water left. I guess I'd survive, but microwaved pizza sounded so much better. It was getting worse outside and I was getting lonely. I missed Domino. I sent a text to Sean and put on some Metallica while I waited, gazing blankly at my manicure, fingers tapping to the music.

What to do about Sean? He's a fascinating contradiction that I want to figure out. He's protective, and he's strong. He's keeping secrets that I'm not sure I want revealed. Even so, my gut tells me he won't hurt me. In fact—the opposite's true—he's gentle and kind to me. He brings light into my heart. My body's on fire every time I'm near him. I can't even imagine what being naked with him would be like. I want to do things with him that I'm pretty sure aren't even legal. I can't imagine a future without him in it anymore. In spite of his secrets, I'm falling in love with him more every day. It should scare me . . . but it doesn't.

A flash lit up the window just as someone pounded on the door. Expecting to see Sean, I yanked it open. My face fell like a rock. "Oh, _yay_! What are _you_ doing here?"

Without a word, Killian rudely pushed past me and set Domino down. After shaking herself off, she pranced over to give me some love.

"Where's Sean? Is he okay?"

He didn't bother to answer my questions. Instead, he surveyed the room like he was planning to stay. He made a circuit from one end to the other, taking time to look at the pictures on the wall, the flowers in the little pottery cup, and the jewelry box my mother gave me. He actually cracked a smile when he touched the tiny Dalmatian. Domino rubbed against him like a cat, and he gave her a strangely gentle pat on the head.

"Are you going to tell me where Sean is or not? I haven't heard from him all day."

With more than a little anger, he snarled, "You have absolutely no sense of self-preservation. Your instincts are _right_ , Mica! Why don't you trust them? You _should_ be scared. What you're thinking is dangerous—and to _others_ besides you and Sean!"

What the hell? How did he know that? "You don't know what you're talking about!"

Looking down his nose, he barked a cold laugh. His eyes were even colder. "It won't work, you know. You two will not be allowed to stay together."

"What? Says who?"

"He has a job to do, and he will eventually have to leave here. We all will. You're going to get hurt if you keep up these silly fantasies. There is no happily ever after."

"I'm not going to argue with you. This is between Sean and me. If you don't like it, stay away from us. Now get out!"

There was another flash of lightning and a crash of thunder rattled the windows. Domino started barking like a crazy dog. I jumped out of my skin, and the lights went out. She was still barking when I finally turned on a flashlight and looked around for Killian. He was gone.

# Chapter 7: Lost and Found

"SHOULD WE CALL NOAH?" I asked Dani.

"Seems like a good idea. Hey, I gotta get to work. Call me later?" She disconnected, and I frowned at the phone. I was bored. I really, really hated being bored.

This had been a horrible week. The rain came down so hard and for so long that I seriously considered building an ark. The stormy weather lasted for days, and I had had enough. By the time the rain was more drizzle than drops, the walls were closing in on me.

"Come on, furball. I'll drive."

Domino called shotgun and wedged her body under the seat belt.

First things first. Snacks. I stopped at a convenience store for water and a bag of chips. Okay, so not too healthy, but I was depressed. Depression called for chips—and chocolate—but I didn't have enough money for both. Domino eyed my purchases with approval. G _ood call on_ _the chips._

After tossing the bag in the back, I pointed the car towards my favorite escape—Giant Mountain. As the miles drifted by, I sang along to the music, letting my mind wander.

After Killian left, I tried to reach Sean, but he didn't answer his phone. I left a message, but just one. No way was I leaving a bunch of whiny messages. If he didn't want to call me back, then that was fine. I wasn't going to nag. I had been hurt too much already, and I wasn't going to let Sean hurt me too. How could he just blow me off like this? I was torn between wanting to cry and wanting to punch him. Mostly I wanted to punch him. Sure. I really liked him. And yes, I was falling in love with him. But I wasn't so far gone yet that I was going to curl up and cry over him. Besides, I was more confused than ever. Killian's words echoed in my memory. _He has a job to do, and he will eventually have to leave here. We all will. You're going to get hurt if you keep up these silly fantasies._

What was he talking about? What _job_? Did this have something to do with their parents' work? I doubted Sean told Killian what he'd shared with me about that. Maybe Killian was making up the _job_ to cover up something else. That was a possibility. He wouldn't tell me the truth, so maybe he just made up something. I didn't know what to believe. One thing was true though—Killian didn't like the idea of me and Sean as a couple. That didn't make a lot of sense either. I tried to come up with reasons for that attitude. I came up empty. I had no idea. It was just weird.

I pictured Killian's cold face one last time before shoving it to the back of my mind with extreme prejudice. I was sick of him. I pictured another face—not cold, but very warm—Sean's. He showed up uninvited in my life, messed with my head, and left me without even saying good-bye. Jerk. I wasn't even able to stay very mad at him. I was just . . . just through. I was _so_ over him.

By the time we got close to the mountain, my jumbled thoughts were back in order. The mountains always put things back into perspective. After all, I was just one tiny being loose in this great wilderness. I wasn't that important to the grand scheme of things. Nature would swallow me up if I was careless or unlucky. She didn't care about fate or destiny or happy endings.

The view was beautiful here. It was pretty even in the heavy mist. The mountain was across the road; the trailhead just visible through the trees. Did I want to hike? The weather wasn't great. Maybe I could simply sit in the car and soak up the peace and quiet. Wait a minute. Is that a lake? It was hard to tell because there was a tree branch in the way. I rolled down the window and stuck my head out. I still couldn't tell.

"Come on, Princess. Let's go check it out."

I threw on my waterproof jacket and grabbed the snacks. We picked our way down a little trail and stopped to admire the view. In front of us was a tiny blue lake. It had a small, sandy beach on one end, a sheer granite wall on the side, and forest bordering the far end. The lake's surface was roiling in the rain right now and didn't look inviting. It looked really deep, and I conjured up Nessie in my head. The wind was blowing through the trees, the clouds heavy overhead. I could imagine all kinds of mystical creatures showing up. I tried to visualize how perfect it would appear on a clear day. The sun would sparkle off the water, which would be a deep rich blue. That reminded me of Sean's eyes. Sigh. I missed him. Where was he?

There was a trail leading from the beach to the forest closest to where I was parked. It was still early, and I was still bored so it seemed like a good idea to check out the trail. It was easy to get to and the ground was flat here. We should be safe enough. Domino was daintily picking her way over the puddles, sniffing everything in sight. When we got farther into the trees I stopped to get my bearings. Wow, it was pretty in here. The vivid green foliage shined with rain. The smell of wet leaves was almost overpowering. I imagined elves living here and had a Tolkien moment before moving on. It was beautiful but kind of creepy. A flash of lightning threw shadows around us and a loud rumble of thunder broke the misty silence. Uh-oh, not good. Time to find the car.

I had walked a good way when I realized I should've already hit the sandy beach. The rocks and trees looked the same, but the heavy rain distorted everything else. I couldn't find a single landmark that stuck out. I stood still for a minute and willed myself not to panic.

"How about you use your Superdog senses to find the car?"

Domino shook some water out of her ears _. What am I, a compass?_

After sniffing at the air, she trotted over to a brushy area across from us and burrowed inside. A minute or so later, she backed out and woofed at me. It turned out to be a little sheltered space under a rocky overhang. The brush had hidden the front of it. It wasn't a cave, but at least it was protected from the weather and was actually still dry. We squeezed in and leaned against a rock. I was exhausted and starting to get cold. I shared some water with Domino and gave her some chips too. I figured we wouldn't be trapped here forever and we could find our way out when the storm moved on. What time was it anyway? I pulled out my cell phone and was crushed to see it was 5:30 and that I had no signal—two _very_ bad things.

Domino shivered against my side. I gathered her to my chest and draped my jacket around us. My poor baby! This sucks. Despite the shelter, I didn't feel very safe. Thunder echoed in the valley and there were lightning strikes so close the air smelled like ozone. And of course, it would be dark soon.

How on earth was I going to get out of here in the dark? Why didn't I grab my backpack? I had a flashlight and some other things in it. It was in the trunk of the car. How stupid was I? Ugh. My survival gear consisted of the stuff that was in my jacket pockets: Chap Stick, dead phone, keys, tissues, and a lint-covered piece of gum. I was out of ideas. It was too dark to wander around the woods hoping to find the beach. I couldn't call anyone. No one knew where we were either . . . _Oh, Jesus, that was bad._ We would have to spend the night here and try again in the morning. We'd better hope my sense of direction is better tomorrow. If not, we are so screwed.

I fell asleep from sheer boredom. I was sitting there thinking about my life and the crazy turns it's taken over the past year. So much had happened and most of it was not good. Sean was the one bright spot I could see. I was daydreaming about him when I dozed off.

It was still raining, but I was warm in my dream as I wandered aimlessly through the forest. Muffling the sound of the rain, the gauzy mist filled the spaces between the trees. My bare feet were scratched and bleeding. I lurched and stumbled in exhaustion. My body was too heavy to move. I wanted to lie down and sleep, but I was afraid I would die if I did, so I kept moving. I _had_ to keep moving. I had to find what I was looking for.

A shadow moved. Something ran past. An unholy stench surrounded me like a rank fog. Instinct took over, and I ran. The shadow kept just out of sight, spurring me forward in my panic. I ran blindly at first, crashing through the trees and scratching myself. But then I saw it—a faint glow in the mist. I knew that light! I'd seen it before—it meant safety. I ran towards it. _Please don't leave! I need you!_ The rank smell was suddenly closer, and I could hear ragged breathing behind me. I was frantic now and running for more than just my life. I ran for my sanity or maybe my soul . . .

The light slowed down. For once, it didn't move away; it didn't drift out of sight or vanish completely. It hovered some distance in front of me. The dark shadow grew distinct in the growing light, and I saw it was a huge, dark beast. It was misshapen but powerfully built, with long claws on its paws, and eyes glittering brilliant red. It paced me as I ran. I sprinted toward the light and the glow expanded to fill the clearing. The light was so intense that it blinded me, but I kept running directly at it. I was too afraid of the beast to stop. Its claws raked my back as I threw myself forward into the light. It closed around me, drawing me into its warmth, its peace, and everything else disappeared.

I woke up on the beach with my faithful pooch whimpering and nudging at my arm. I lumbered to my feet and practically ran to the car. This forest wasn't peaceful any longer. My spidey senses were tingling on overtime. It was time to run.

The sound of the deadbolt slamming home was the sweetest sound I'd heard all day. After a long, long shower, I crawled into bed. I expected to fall asleep immediately, but my brain wouldn't quiet down. I snuggled with Domino and thought about all the things that had happened to us that day. I had started out angry and hurt because of Sean and Killian. I felt wonder and enchantment at the discovery of the beautiful lake and the misty forest. I'd felt fear at getting lost, and then terror during the nightmare. Yet somehow, I managed to find the way back to the beach . . . while apparently unconscious . . . That's a bit of a stretch for me on my own. I gave that some thought.

When I was lost and scared today, I did not think to pray. It didn't occur to me to ask _God_ to help me. I hadn't expected His help because I didn't believe He was there for me anymore. I was left to fend for myself. This year taught me that I was alone in my world, and I had to take care of myself. But what happened today? What or who helped me find the way back to the beach? What was the light in my dreams? I opened my heart, and I knew the answer.

It was right in front of me.

I smiled at the face in my mind.

And for the first time in nearly a year, I prayed to God.

# Chapter 8: International Diplomacy

I DIDN'T HAVE TIME to dwell on my newfound sense of peace. Ricki was back from her family's trip to Charleston, and she was ready to party. It was the Fourth of July and we were headed to the marina to go skiing. I was doing a little happy dance on the dock when Dani showed up with a strange guy. I nudged Ricki in the side. "Who's the new eye candy?"

She squinted towards the parking lot. "Oh, he's an exchange student. He's from . . . Oh, I forget. Some place. Anyhow, he's here until January. Wow, he looks like Heath Ledger." Then she laughed evilly, and added, "Dani said Aric is _so_ pissed! He's gone ape-shit over this guy staying at her house. He even complained to her mom! It makes _total_ sense now!" She was still laughing when they got to the boat.

I hugged Dani, whispering, "Oh, my God! Who's this guy? And why didn't you tell me you were getting a model? I am _so_ jealous!"

Dani, being Dani, looked chagrined and apologized for not calling sooner. "Let me introduce you guys. Stefan?"

The blond-haired eye candy ambled over with an adorably crooked smile. I resisted the urge to stand taller and push out my boobs. All drooling aside, I wasn't interested in males at the moment. It was all Sean's fault too. Jerk. Even so . . . The yummy Stefan _was_ stare worthy, at the very least.

"These are my two best friends, Mica and Ricki. This is Stefan. He's from Switzerland," Dani explained.

Ricki was less than enthusiastic since Kevin and Aric had joined us. She was still hoping Kevin would ask her out, but he kept dragging his feet. I didn't have the heart to tell her that she should move on. There were just some bubbles I didn't want to burst. I figured _someone_ should have dreams! My days of dreaming were behind me. I was a live-in-the-moment kind of girl now. _Happily ever after_ could kiss my ass—Sean, too.

After loading skis and snacks, we all squeezed onto the boat. Ricki maneuvered the shiny craft out of the marina. The perfectly calm air turned the lake into a giant blue mirror. Gorgeous! Once we got into the open water, Ricki pushed down the throttle until we flew. The jolt sent us all stumbling into each other. Dani fell against Aric, and he made a big deal out of catching her. Yes, Aric, you're a stud. Good job, dude. Dani was dimpling up at him but turned around to wink at me. It was time to reel her man in. I almost felt sorry for him, poor dumb guy. She was enchanting when she wanted something. Once she made up her mind, no one said no to her. Her mother never could, I hadn't done it yet, and Aric would give her whatever she was whispering about now. No doubt about it, the dimples were impressive.

It wasn't long before we were out far enough to ski. Ricki slowed the boat to a stop, and I bounced into Stefan's arm. He caught me against his bare, and very muscular, chest. I was laughing. He was laughing. Everyone else was gawking. I turned beet red all the way to my boobs.

Still chuckling, I put some space between us and turned magenta when Aric teased, "Holy shit, Kevin—look at Mica's face! Could she get any redder?"

"By the way, Mica, where's Sean?" Kevin asked with an evil smile.

Ricki, being the awesome best friend she is, hit the throttle a bit, and Kevin fell on his ass. I gave him the finger and grabbed the skis. I'd been waiting all week for this.

In minutes, I was flying over the water, literally. My skis were barely skimming the surface and I gave the thumbs up for more speed. I had five more minutes and was making the best of it. The boat went sixty miles an hour, and today I was maxing that out. The rush was incredible! I let myself fly. I was free!

Buuutttt . . . not for long. Reality can be so rude. A boat was approaching from the starboard side. From the corner of my eye, I could make out a couple of people on the deck, but I wasn't close enough to see faces. Aric kept the speed high, and I was showing off. I did a little hip wiggle as we passed the boat and nearly fell off my skis. I was so surprised, that I stumbled and nearly lost it. _Don't fall, don't fall, don't fall._ Aric slowed down, and I sank into the lake. I floated with my back to the _Mystic_ , cursing fluently in two languages—English—and girlfriend.

When Aric stopped to pick me up, I waved happily in case _anyone_ was watching. Stefan reached over the side to help me in. Gorgeous, but clueless Stefan . . . with his ripped chest and curling blond hair . . . Perfect! I wrapped my arms around his neck and let him pull me up. Take that, you jerk on the boat.

By the time the sun had set, I'd shaken off any lingering thoughts of Sean and thrown myself into enjoying the rest of the holiday on the beach with my friends. Stefan was occupied with someone other than me—many _someones_. Everyone wanted to meet the cool guy from Switzerland. Most of those people were girls, and they all wanted to screw him. _Bitches_. He had so many half-naked bodies sprawled against him that I'd need a bottle of bleach to clean him up again. I growled in my throat. _Stupid cows_. He met my annoyed glare with a lick of his lips and a quick wink. Whatever. I tossed my head and took a swig of my drink. So what if everyone else was paired up and getting all snuggly on the sand? Huffing under my breath, I dumped my empty beer can into the trash and crossed to the ice chest for another. I wasn't interested in him. Not even a little bit. Nope.

"I'm afraid to try to kiss you now. You look like you'll bite me." Stefan came up behind me and whispered against my hair. He was standing very close, and I tensed in surprise.

"If you startle me like that again, I might accidently kick your ass," I said with a slow smile.

He laughed at that and came around to face me. He looked me up and down and sighed. I knew what he saw. I ran 50 miles a week. I followed an intense workout routine I bought from an infomercial on TV. My muscles were lean but strong. I did self-defense training twice a week too. Sure, I might look and behave like a typical girl, but I was training my body and mind to kick ass, if anybody ever assaulted either of those again. I knew people talked about me sometimes. The whole thing with Scott was old news now, but people still whispered. I didn't let it bother me, but I wanted them to know I would not go down so easy next time. And if my stronger body couldn't save me, the stun gun I carried would help out. I was in charge now. That felt pretty good. But tonight, I wanted romance, not violence.

"Don't worry. I won't bite as long as you play nice." I slipped my hand in his, smiling up into his eyes. They were clear and green, unclouded by secrets. His hair was blowing away from his face, and the light from the fire flickered across his skin. I hoped I looked as good right now.

He ran his palm down my back, and murmured, "Let's go for a walk. It's crowded here."

My stomach did a little flip-flop as we left the group. We walked barefoot along the water's edge, skipping out of range when the cold water splashed across our feet. Someone had left a lawn chair in the sand, and we wandered over to it. Stefan pulled me onto his lap and kissed me.

His lips were soft and felt nice against mine, but I didn't see fireworks. I pulled back and peered into his eyes. They were still a beautiful green, and that was the problem. They weren't filled with the blue fire that could ignite me with a glance. This wasn't going to work. I sighed. Stefan misunderstood my sigh for interest and kissed me more passionately, his hands gripping my face, holding my mouth to his as he slipped his tongue inside. I tried, really, I did. I kissed him back with enthusiasm, but still no fireworks . . . No warmth in my belly; No tingling in my blood. Very quickly, _his_ excitement became obvious; I should probably get up. Before I could though, the sound of voices interrupted us.

"Mica, is that you?" Dec was striding towards us with an angry scowl clouding his normally sunny face.

Now what?

In my struggle to get out of the wobbly chair, I nearly knocked us into the sand. Stefan helped me up, stiffened, eyes shooting warily beyond Dec. I groaned out loud. Of course, he wasn't alone. Killian was with him. I casually looked around for the one I wanted to see.

Killian said, "He's not here. Don't bother looking."

His tone set my teeth on edge. "I can see that. What do you want?"

"Oh, now it's attitude? _Nice_. We actually came to make sure you were okay." He looked down his nose at Stefan, and added, "But I see you're handling yourself just fine."

Dec still looked angry, and said, "Can I talk to you alone for a minute?" He glanced at Stefan and added, "Sorry, dude."

"Sure. I'll be right back," I told Stefan.

We moved a few feet away before Dec stopped me. He looked over his shoulder with another frown. Killian was speaking to Stefan. To the average person, it probably seemed like they were just hanging out. But Stefan's face was tense, his eyes narrowed. He was pissed, but he'd be crazy to try anything with Killian.

"So what do you want, Dec?"

"I wanted to make sure you are really okay. Do you need anything? Have you had any more trouble with Flynn?"

Something in his voice made my skin prickle. He was warning me . . . and he was honestly worried . . . It was impossible to stay frosty with him, so I relaxed and responded with less sarcasm.

"Dec, you're sweet. But I don't need you to worry about me. I'm a big girl now, and I can take care of myself. I'm ready for him if he comes after me again." I even flexed my biceps for him.

He didn't look convinced. "I think you should know I've heard rumors . . . it sounds like he's planning something, uh, nasty, for you. I'm sorry to have to tell you that, but I couldn't leave it to chance." He rolled his eyes at Killian.

"Oh and let me guess. Killian wanted to leave it to chance? Is that why you were so mad when you got here? Were you arguing about telling me?"

He hesitated. "No, I was pissed at seeing you with that . . . that tool over there. How could you do that?"

"Do what? Move on now that Sean has blown me off? Find someone else to hang out with? Someone who wants to be with me? Oh, yeah, I guess I should just sit around and wait for him to come around. Sorry, Dec, I liked Sean, really. But he's blown _me_ off, remember? This isn't what I wanted." My voice caught at the end.

"You don't understand what's going on, and I can't tell you anything else. Please, just know that Sean would be here if he could."

Oh, yeah, right. Like today? It was too much. I snapped, "Really? Well, that's news to me. Where is he?"

"I can't say, and here comes Killian. He's going to kill me if I say anything else."

Killian came up, and announced, "Time to go, Dec. The others are waiting for us." He looked over his shoulder at Stefan, and added, "Be careful. Everything has a point of no return, and you could get caught in something you can't handle."

Dec kissed my cheek, his lips brushing my ear. "Bye, Mica. We'll be here if you need us. Just call my name." He winked and left me standing there with an irritated Swiss hottie.

The mood was dead so we went back to the rest of the party. We sat together, but my mind was someplace else. My thoughts drifted back to the night I spent with Sean. He had opened up about a lot of things, but what did I really know about him? He was a mystery still. And Dec? Sweet boy . . . Another mystery was he. My fingers stroked my cheek where he had kissed me. The spot had been tingling since he left.

A few weeks later, I was playing pool at The Angry Lizard with Ricki and Kevin. I liked the funky neon lizards on the logo and there was always good music. After the third horrifying defeat, I told Kevin I was going to grab some air on the outside patio. Maybe some oxygen would help my shitty pool skills. The second I walked outside, my instincts started nagging. I was halfway to a snow-covered table when I hesitated. The streetlight didn't quite reach the patio, and the outside lights hadn't been turned on. Too dark. Too empty. Probably I should go back inside.

I had almost reached the door just as he crossed the sidewalk. The blood drained from my face. Shit! I left the stun gun inside with Ricki. Damn it! With my back pressed to the wall, I moved the last two feet towards the door. I had my fingers on the handle when J.J. walked through and blocked it. I was trapped.

"Where're you going, baby? Aren't you happy to see me?" Scott sneered with a smarmy tone that made my skin crawl.

A ball of ice formed in my stomach. "Get lost, Scott. You know you're not allowed this close to me. What's the matter? You ready to go back to jail? Missing your boyfriend?"

Oh yeah, when in danger, be a smart ass. This is always a good plan.

J.J. snickered and reached out to grab me. Jerking my arm out of range, I swung around, kicking him squarely in the chest, sending him flying backwards through the open doorway. Scott charged me and snatched at my arm. I aimed a roundhouse kick at his crotch, but he turned at the last second so I caught him in the thigh instead. He grunted at the impact but didn't go down. He swung a fist into my cheek that sent me swaying and nearly falling to my knees. I planted my feet and shook my head to clear it. A voice inside my head was screaming to yell for help, but I couldn't seem to get the words past the terror clogging my throat.

Chuckling meanly, Scott circled me with his eyes locked onto mine. The madness I saw made my stomach clench. Like watching a rabid dog, I kept my eyes glued to his every movement.

I need help. I need help.

The thought tumbled through my mind, but I was frozen in place until Dec's face swam in my memory. He said to call his name. Would it work? It was worth a shot.

Feeling stupid, but more than a little desperate, I forced a ragged whisper from my lips. "Declan? Help!"

Scott made a sound, not quite a laugh, and moved in for the kill. From the opposite side, J.J. was closing in on me too. A truck squealed to a stop in the side driveway. Someone opened its back door, shouting at Scott to hurry the fuck up.

Oh, my God. No, no, no!

This was very, very bad. It was crystal clear. Scott didn't plan to attack me again and leave me here. He and his friends were going to take me someplace private. Someplace they could play with their new toy before they broke it and threw it in the landfill. Cold sweat poured down my back. If I got into that truck, I would never get away. I would be helpless, and no one would ever see me again. Well— _that_ wasn't going to happen without mass casualties.

My adrenaline was running on high, and I was running on autopilot. I kept them at bay for about fifteen seconds, but I was outnumbered and they were both much stronger than me. My training wasn't going to help for long. They were slowly backing me into a corner when J.J. shoved me hard from the side, sending me flying against the wall. The pain took my breath away. Dazed, I lost focus for a second just as Scott's fist connected with my temple. As my knees buckled, someone suddenly caught me under the arms. I couldn't believe my eyes. Out of nowhere, Dec had showed.

Sean and Killian also appeared. They took about a second to size up the situation before attacking. Both of their eyes were burning like a hot blue flame. Scott and J.J. backed away. The truck roared off.

"What the hell? What's wrong with you freaks?" Scott demanded.

Without a word, Sean and Killian attacked with a ferocity that sent warning bells clanging in my head again. Where did they learn to fight like that? It was freakin' amazing—terrifying, but amazing. Scott and J.J. tried to put up a fight at first but were so outmatched it was almost sad. Sean and Killian swatted aside any punches they threw while pummeling them into bloody wrecks. Realizing they were about to die, they tried to run away. In a split second, Sean and Killian had both men pressed against the wall. Killian held J.J. up off of his feet by his neck. J.J.'s eyes bulged in terror. He made strangling noises while frantically kicking his legs.

Killian stared coldly, and said, "Give me one reason to let you live."

J.J. started babbling, and Killian squeezed his throat harder. "Shut up."

Sean had Scott pinned to the wall with his forearm against his throat. The lines of his face were rock hard, eyes still burning. He didn't look completely human. Scott was panicking. His mouth was open in a scream, but no sound came out. He was looking around wildly for help, but there was no one to help him. He appealed to me. I gave him the finger.

Sean said, "I'm getting tired of kicking your ass. You just don't learn." Then he pressed down on Scott's throat. "Do you _want_ to die?"

Sean's words faded into silence; my vision tunneled to a single dark point. I was losing consciousness, struggling to stay awake. Dec cradled me in his arms, murmuring something in a language I didn't understand. Face bright with rage, body shaking, he watched the fight with frightening intensity. He was so pissed his eyes were glowing. What the hell is that? I tried to wriggle away, but he squeezed me tighter, hard fingers digging into my arms. He looked dangerous, and I was more than a little freaked out.

"What's the matter? I've got you. Those guys can't hurt you now."

I pointed at his face. "It's not them I'm worried about."

He blinked, and his eyes were perfectly normal again. "Better?"

"Uh, yeah, what . . ."

"It's no big deal, just the lights in the alley. Don't worry about it." He smoothed my hair away from my face and smiled crookedly at me.

The dimples must've distracted me because I forgot what we were talking about. As the adrenaline wore off, pain took its place. My ribs hurt. My shoulder hurt. My hand hurt. My face was numb, though. I must be going into shock. Someone should warm me up. In response, Dec seemed to get warmer around me until I was cocooned in his body heat. He smoothed strands of hair from my bloody cheek, murmuring in a strange language. I tried to ask what was going on, but he put his finger against my lips and shushed me.

I came to in my bed surrounded by several angry men. Sean was arguing with Killian. Killian was pointing at me, whispering furiously. Dec stood next to my head with his arms crossed, still as a statue. They were all talking with an older guy who I'd never seen before, but who seemed kind of familiar. Who was he? The others treated him with some deference. Maybe he was one of their dads? He graced me with a warm smile the second he noticed that my eyes were open.

"Mica's awake now. Very good. How are you feeling?" He came to the bed, squatting to study me with grave blue eyes.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Raphael. I'm here to help you. Do you mind if I take a look at your face? You have a good bruise coming up, and I want to see if you have any broken bones."

He seemed nice enough. I appealed to Dec for reassurance. He squeezed my fingers, smiling faintly. "It's okay, darlin'. He knows what he's doing."

Sean considered us with narrowed eyes. He still hadn't said anything to me. I wanted to curl up against him and feel safe again. But now was not the time or place.

The man named Raphael sat down on the edge of the bed and took my face in one of his hands. Long and lean, his gentle fingers were feverishly warm as they cupped my chin to examine me. Probably, I looked horrible. It seemed like my face was always black and blue or yellow and green. Why did I _always_ get hit in the _face_?

He chuckled, and said, "Hold still for a minute. This won't hurt at all." He closed his eyes. Running his fingers over my face, he traced the bones around my eyes and cheeks then stroked along my jawbone. My skin warmed and tingled at his touch, and the numbness vanished. Gazing at him in awe and a little fear, I raised my trembling fingers to my cheek.

"Did you heal me? How is that possible?" I winced as my rib protested the movement.

"Here, let me see that." He laid his hand across my rib cage—I felt the same flow of heat—and the pain was gone. He had _definitely_ healed me.

"I'm afraid this will have to be our little secret, Mica. I'm not allowed to talk about this and I'm asking you to keep this to yourself. Many people could get hurt if word got around. I'm going to leave now. You and I will meet again, but for now, I believe young Sean would like a word with you."

Dec gave me a pat on the head like I gave the dog. He grinned crookedly, and said, "Try to stay out of trouble, and call me any time you need help. I'll always be there. It's what I do." He waved Killian out the door, and they were gone. The silence was preternaturally loud.

Sean stared out of the window with his back to me. He held himself rigid, and I ached to touch him to release the tension. What was eating at him? He'd looked miserable ever since he'd shown up tonight. I drank in the lines of his body, the curve of his skull, and swallowed the lump in my throat. When I closed my eyes, the memory of his touch, his taste, flooded my senses, sending my heart into happy skitters. It was no use. I still loved him. Just seeing him made me want to throw my arms around him and beg him to stay. The silence grew uncomfortable until I finally wrapped my arms around his back. There was an instant shock at the contact, but I refused to let go.

"You can shut off your force field—I don't bite."

He stiffened at my words, but started to laugh, the sound rich and welcome. He laughed until he had tears in his eyes. I hate being left out of a private joke. What was so funny? I must have looked irritated because he finally went from laughing, to chuckling, to a heartbreaking grin.

"All done? Do you want to tell me what the joke is?"

"No. I. Do. Not." He said each word distinctly, grin gone in a flash. Serious Sean was back.

"Well, then . . ."

"Mica, you're driving me fucking insane. _Why_ can't you stay out of trouble? You're just one girl! This should be easy! But you have a psychopath determined to rape you and cut you to pieces. You're reckless with no regard for your own life! Do you think you can just run around taking risks without consequences?"

He gripped my shoulders, pulling me against his chest, tipping my chin back to force me to meet his eyes. He stopped shouting, but the quiet anger in his voice was worse. "I can't keep up with you! I can't keep you safe. I can't stand to be around you. I can't stand to be _away_ from you. You're a complication I don't need and can't afford."

Stung, I cried, "What do you want from me?"

"I wish I knew." He crushed his mouth over mine.

He kissed me in frustration and anger; hard and demanding, taking everything, giving nothing back. Moaning in protest, I tried to squirm away, but he refused to let me go. Bending me backwards, he gripped me so tightly his fingertips dug into my skin, but his mouth gentled. His tongue swept over my bruised lips, soothing the slight twinge of pain before slipping inside to mate with mine. The familiar current slammed through me, making me dizzy and hungry. Tiny lights danced behind my eyes—my knees went weak—my body sang for his. I was light and weightless and whole again. Our breaths mingled as we clung together; all thought vanished until there was nothing but raw need and desperate passion.

Plastering myself against him, I clutched his shirt, dragging it over his head, smoothing my palms over his muscles on the way. His beautiful mouth molded perfectly to mine as he angled me down on the bed, covering me with his body. He was burning hot and gloriously hard. I closed my eyes as he trailed his tongue over the pulse jumping in my throat, nibbling and kissing his way down. With one hand on my breast and the other pushing my thighs open to cup my sex, he took over, and I swear my entire body cheered. I arched my hips, inviting more, ready to beg if he didn't cooperate.

He groaned against my nipple, clever fingers stroking my folds through the thin fabric of my pants. When he brushed the sensitive little nub, I gasped and rolled my hips against his hand, helping, urging, wanting him to finish what he started. Was that me making those little panting sounds?

"God, baby, you're so hot. I want to strip you naked and make you scream." He dipped his head and caught my straining nipple between his teeth, nipping hard before wrapping his tongue around it.

My hips jacked off the bed, jamming his hand harder against my crotch and nearly strangling him with my breast. "Yes, yes. Good plan!" I was so totally on board with naked and screaming.

But instead of stripping my clothes off and burying his cock between my legs, he dragged his mouth away and shoved himself up to his elbows. The loss of his touch was nearly painful; my heart ached, my lungs desperately reached for air. My sex tingled and wept—and not happy tears, either.

"I'm so sorry, love." He practically flung himself off of the bed.

"What's wrong, Sean? It's okay." I was on fire and didn't want to wait. I was in love with him and there would never be anyone else for me. There was a click in my head when he kissed me. "I want to be with you."

"What you want doesn't matter." He eyeballed the door as though it were an escape hatch on a sinking ship.

I put my arms around him again and pressed my cheek against his chest. I stood there listening to his breathing. It was ragged like my own. My heart pounded in my chest. I drew a deep breath to slow it down. Surely he could hear it too. He drew me closer and sighed. I tensed. I knew that sound. He was about to leave—again. Oh, no you don't! I eased up on my tiptoes to press my lips against the side of his neck. I could feel the blood flowing through him, and I kissed him where the pulse throbbed.

"Stay?" I whispered.

In answer, he walked us over to the bed with a resigned expression. As the backs of my calves bumped against the mattress, the light bulb went off in my head. Ah ha! Two could play this game. A hint of a sad smile crossed his mouth as he lowered his mouth to mine. I started to feel it—the strange drowsiness I'd felt before.

_Not today, Sean._ I bit his lip and held it between my teeth. Surprised, he tried to jerk back but couldn't move without losing flesh. I smiled in victory.

I put my hand over his mouth, and warned, "Don't you dare."

He blinked at me. Twice.

"Oh, yeah, I know about that. I don't know how you do it, but I know you've been making me fall asleep. Now that I think about it, you've done it a few times. When you get uncomfortable, you knock me out. It's cheating, you know. And you should be ashamed of yourself." I was feeling righteous.

His expression was a cross between shock, horror, and amusement. His sense of humor finally won out, and he burst into laughter for the second time tonight. I was speechless.

"You're too smart for your own good!" His chuckles petered off into a weighty silence. He lifted my fingers and kissed them hard. "You're right. I _am_ ashamed. But not for the reasons you think. I'm not _cheating_ —I'm trying to _protect_ you. I can't seduce you; it wouldn't be right. I'm ashamed because I can't keep my hands off of you. My control is slipping, and I'm putting other people in danger by allowing this to go on. I can't stay here with you, and you deserve to have someone who can build a life with you. I'm not that person." His eyes glittered like ice. He stood up to go, finishing bluntly, "I'm not taking your virginity."

I blushed to the roots of my hair. "You jerk! Don't act like I'm _throwing_ it at you! You don't want to have sex with me? Fine—you keep telling yourself that—but the massive hard-on in your jeans doesn't freakin' lie. Deny it all you want if it makes you feel righteous. We're meant to be together and it'll happen whether you fight it or not. I feel it in my heart. It's destined."

He had frozen halfway to the door. Now, he turned slowly, his face and throat flushed, eyes still gleaming, hands shaking as he struggled to calm down. The next words were forced through his teeth. "You're wrong. I'm not your destiny." He sucked in a deep breath and said, "I should go. This convo's going nowhere."

My turn to take a deep breath. "Wait. If you leave, I'll have nightmares. Stay here and talk to me. Your virtue is safe with me. I won't even think about touching you. _Please?_ "

Scowling at the ceiling, he ground his teeth but didn't voice the argument that seemed to be strangling him. Choosing to ignore his simmering annoyance, I got us some drinks and put on some music to hopefully soothe the savage breast.

After a few minutes, Sean rolled his stiff shoulders, leaned against the side of the bed, and closed his eyes. "Tell me about your nightmares. What do you see? What triggers them?"

"Scott Flynn triggers them. I dream every time I see him."

I described the dreams; I told him about the endless hallways and doors, the shining knife, and the beast. I had never shared them with anyone else, but he made me feel as though I could tell him anything. He wanted to know everything about them so I took a long time to get through them and was emotionally drained at the end of my story.

"So at the end, there is only fear. That's it—just overwhelming fear." Sitting beside him on the floor, I had my knees tucked up to my chin and was hugging them.

He stroked the palm of my hand. "Is there nothing else there? No hope for you in your dream?" He sounded oddly wistful.

His eyes were a deep ocean blue with bright flecks of gold that caught the light around us. Another light bulb went off. "Hope? I suppose there is. Sometimes I see a golden light. It's beautiful and pure, and I feel . . . protected . . ." My voice trailed off at his nod of encouragement.

"It's _you_ ," I breathed.

He tried to shake his head, but he wasn't fast enough. "Now, Mica—"

"Don't deny it. It all fits together. The light in the hospital, in my dreams, around your body—it's the same." Holding my breath, I searched his face for answers. "What are you?"

He took a deep breath and let it out in a whoosh. "Would you like me to lie to you? I can't tell you the truth."

"Can't or won't?"

"Can't—I'm not allowed to tell you the truth. No one is supposed to know about us. A lot of people could get hurt if this got out."

"Sean, I'm not going to say anything to anyone. I think I've been way more trusting and patient than you deserve. I want to know what I'm involved with."

"Let's just say we're really well-trained operatives keeping an eye on things."

Uh-huh. "Like spies?"

Spies that glow when they're sleeping? What? Is he radioactive?

"Something like that."

"Mm hmm. I'm not buying that."

"Well, that's what I'm selling you. Take it or leave it. I can't say anything else; if I do, they'll make me leave here and reassign me someplace else. You don't want that, do you?"

No, but I did want a better explanation. "Okay, fine. That'll work for now." But only for now. I'd bide my time. Clearly he wasn't trying to hurt me so I'd give him some space. He'd come around eventually. I'd wear him down.

Sean took me by my shoulders. "Will you keep our secret, Mica?"

He was back to scary soldier-mode again. This version of Sean was more like Killian. I could imagine his hard face scaring enemies across the planet. I swallowed and put on a brave mask.

"Cross my heart. I swear I won't tell anyone."

He relaxed a little then, so I asked, "Does this mean you'll stay, now that I know? There's no reason to avoid me now, is there?"

He pulled me into his arms and rested his chin on my head. "I'll stay. God help me."

# Chapter 9: Pain and Suffering

FALL IN UPSTATE NEW YORK can be glorious. Some years the weather is crisp and dry, and the trees dazzle with their rich colors. The sky is vast and blue. The smell of dead leaves and fresh pine is invigorating. Other years, like this one, the weather is dreary, cold, and wet. The sky is leaden with clouds that churn overhead and drop heavy rains that ruin every single weekend. That was precisely the crappy weather pattern that had been going on for the past month. I moped in the window at Zen. Stupid rain! Domino's nose was leaving condensation against the glass. She didn't like the rain either. We were both feeling cooped up and restless.

"Here sweetie, try this. It'll make you feel better." Dani's mom handed me a cup of tea and flashed a dreamy smile at the rain.

"Thanks, Ms. Taylor." I blew on the cup and glowered out the window again.

"You're so impatient, Mica. The earth _needs_ the kiss of the rain, just as a young woman needs the kiss of her man. Would you begrudge the Mother her romance?"

An image of my man kissing me popped into my head, and I blushed. Okay, so Mother Earth could have her way with the rain. She could wrap herself in a blanket of snow if she wanted to. I just wanted to get outside and _do_ something! I was tired of being stuck inside. I hadn't seen Sean at all this week. He was supposedly in Ireland at a funeral. He was going to miss a week of classes, but I guess that doesn't matter if you're a secret agent man. I wished I was with him. He described Ireland with such wistfulness that it was clear that he loved it there. I was a little jealous that it held so much of his love. I wanted a little of it too. I stood there gazing out through the foggy glass until Dani finally showed.

As usual, she appeared without a sound. I jumped and laughed at myself. I couldn't help looking down to make sure she had feet. Yep, shoes too. I had no idea how a person could be so quiet. It was a bit creepy really. I told her that, and she just laughed and bent down to hug Domino.

It's hard to believe it's been a year since I almost died in that house; a year since I'd met Sean. So much has happened since then. I wasn't taking anything for granted now. I was more in love with Sean than ever but tried to crush the curiosity that I felt about him and his friends. I was very afraid that I would push them away if I got too nosy. We settled into a routine during the rainy fall months. On the days we weren't working or in class, Sean came over to hang out. I was surprised to find out that he liked to run too. We started running even in the rain. Some days Sean came to the gym to watch me practice sparring. He got in the ring with me a few times. I was so proud of him. He was pretty amazing to watch. He moved with a fluid grace that I would never match. He was always about the business of fighting when we were in the ring. He put on his soldier face and usually kicked my butt. I always learned something new, though. Little by little, he shared more of himself and I fell even harder.

Dani interrupted my daydreams by reminding me that we had exams tomorrow, and she had to study. Yeah, yeah. I can take a hint. I had my own tests to worry about, so I braved the rain and hunkered down in my apartment to read my English notes. Domino lay stretched out against my back snoring softly. Her furry body was like a furnace, and I promptly dozed off. A sharp tap on the window woke me up a little later. Was it Sean? I looked through the peephole and opened the door. Dec pushed his way inside.

"Are you here alone?" He stalked to the bathroom to check. When he was satisfied I was alone, he came back to the bedroom, eyes blazing, entire body coiled like a spring.

A trickle of fear crawled down my spine.

"What's the matter, Dec? Did something happen? Where's Sean?" I reached out to take his hand, and he jerked away.

"Don't touch me! I'm not safe right now." He was vibrating with anger and looked like the soldier I sensed he was.

I put my hands out in a gesture of peace and tried again. "Dec, what's going on? You're here, so you must want to tell me something, so tell me; what's wrong? I only have so much patience. You know that." I made a weak attempt to lighten the atmosphere. He glowered at me. I took a step back.

Pacing back and forth, he groaned, "I'm not supposed to be here. Killian will destroy me when he finds out what we're doing. But I promised Sean I'd bring you to him. You have to come with me now. He's been . . . shot."

"What? Shot? What the hell happened? Is he in the hospital? Where is he?" I had a million questions.

Dec held up his hand, and the sound of my voice stopped. My lips were still moving, but there was no sound coming out. I clamped my lips together and glared. He glared back. I took the hint and grabbed my backpack. We were in the driveway when I realized he didn't have a car.

"We're taking your car. I'll drive," he announced.

"Fine." I had audio again. "Oh, I can talk now? Would you mind telling me what you just did to me?"

With an expression of irritated amusement, he muttered, "Not on your life."

He drove without speaking until we were out of town and on our way into the countryside. I knew the area but hadn't been out this way in a long time. Was this where they lived? It was already dark, and the wind was gusting hard. Trees bent against it, casting ominous shadows in the sketchy moonlight. The sense of impending doom ratcheted my imagination into overdrive. I wrapped my arms around my chest to stop my shivering. I tried to ask a few more questions, but he wasn't in a chatty mood.

"Just chill. You'll see when we get there."

_That_ was really not reassuring. In fact, it freaked me out. I imagined Sean bleeding out on a mattress in a basement or lying on the kitchen table letting Killian stitch him up with kite string. Or worse, Sean dying just before I got to him. I imagined his scary eyes blazing into mine with a last declaration of love, just before being extinguished like a match in the wind. I didn't realize I was crying until Dec pressed a tissue into my hand. I wiped at my face and sniffed.

God, please let him be okay.

"We're here. I'm going to warn you before we go inside. It looks bad. I don't want to freak you out, but you have to be prepared. You won't help him by throwing up or passing out. Can you handle this?"

"Dec, I just want to see him. Please, can we go inside?" I was forcing myself to stay calm. I could handle anything as long as I got to see Sean. The anticipation was killing me.

We were parked in front of a small farmhouse in a clearing surrounded by woods. The house looked fairly new and had a wraparound covered porch. He led me up the steps to the front door. I heard music playing in the back of the house and followed the sound. As I rounded the corner at the end of the hallway, Dec stepped out of a room and faced me. I ignored the obvious question and hurried inside. I don't know what I expected to see, but it wasn't what I saw then. I stopped dead in my tracks, and my mouth dropped open.

Sean was lying naked across the bed. Someone had draped a sheet over his waist, but the rest of his body was bare. There was a blackened patch of puckered skin across most of his stomach and chest. His skin was raw and bloody in places and burned black in others. The wound looked like someone torched him with a flamethrower. It was a burn, not a gunshot wound. The room smelled like barbequed meat, and my stomach heaved in protest. Black spots danced behind my eyes. Willing myself to calm down, I sucked in a deep breath and forced my stomach to stay put. Dec was right. Puking wasn't helpful. Neither was passing out at the foot of the bed. Sean was so still it broke my heart. What the hell happened to him?

Dec wrapped his arm around my waist, giving me a squeeze of reassurance. He bent to whisper in Sean's ear before saying, "It's okay. You can sit with him. He wants you here."

"Can I touch him?"

"Go ahead. It might help. I'll be in the living room if you need me."

I knelt beside Sean, carefully covering his hand with mine. I was a little wary of surprising him so I moved slowly. His fingers curled to thread through mine and he squeezed gently. His eyes didn't open but fluttered weakly.

Stroking his fingers, I murmured, "I'm here, Sean. I'm right here."

I don't know how much time passed while we sat there in the little bedroom. He looked so vulnerable lying there; fragile, broken. His eyes were closed in sleep, but his rest wasn't peaceful. He seemed to be dreaming, eyes racing beneath the silky skin of their lids, fingers twitching. His jaw was clenched in pain. A soft groan rumbled in his chest.

"What beast chases _you_ , Sean? Do you have no light to chase away the shadows?"

Trying to comfort him, I stroked his arm, murmuring softly, but he still writhed in agony. I blinked back tears of sympathy and traced the curve of muscle over his shoulder. The skin was smooth and even, soft to the touch, kissable. I dropped a gentle kiss on a small freckle just below his collarbone. He was achingly beautiful, and someone had damaged him so viciously. Who could do such a thing? What kind of animal would burn someone? My stomach tightened in a burst of anger. I wanted to rip that animal's head off. A low moan drew my attention back to his face. I decided to risk getting singed and kissed his lips. When nothing bad happened, I rested my lips against his and just breathed . . . in and out . . . in and out. I willed my strength to flow into him as if I could give my life to him.

As the night wore on, I sang to him to let him know I was still there. "Chasing Cars" was stuck in my head—I sang it off key and under my breath—I couldn't get it out of my mind.

I cried until my eyes were dry. Finally exhausted, I laid my head against his good side and prayed for him.

_God, surely he can't die? You've brought him to save me. He's pulled me back from the brink of darkness and brought me into the light. He's important. I feel it_.

Aloud, I said simply, "I love him, God. Please don't let him die."

# Chapter 10: Miraculous Recovery

THE SOUND OF RAISED VOICES woke me as the sun was coming up. It took a minute to remember where I was—lying on the floor where I had finally passed out the night before. Sean was still asleep. I watched his chest rise and fall.

Thank you, God.

Was it my imagination or did his skin look better? The wound was smaller now and less raw. How is that possible? I was about to reach out to touch him when a rude voice startled me.

"What do you think you're doing? Don't touch him! Are you _crazy_?" Killian was livid, and looming in the doorway. Dec was hovering behind him with hands spread in apology.

I launched myself in front of him. "Shh! Don't come in here yelling at me! I'm not going to hurt him, you idiot!"

Feeling especially defensive, I shoved my palm against his chest and got shocked off balance. Shaking the pins and needles from my hand, I glared at the smirk twisting his mouth. Him too? Seriously? I need rubber shoes.

The rude beast narrowed his eyes to slits before slipping into the most condescending tone possible. "You still don't get it, do you? He doesn't need you to nurse him back to health. He'll be fine in a day or two."

Clearly, he was insane. "Are you kidding me? He's hurt! Surely even you can see that? He should be in a hospital— _not_ in this house. My God, I think he's in a coma. He hasn't moved in twelve hours. He must be in agony."

He actually barked a short laugh. "You don't know anything about him, babe. He's not dying. He's just healing. It takes time to recover from a wound like that. He's not moving because he's conserving all of his energy to focus it on the places he's injured."

"He's not dying?" I looked wildly at Dec.

I promised Sean I'd find you and bring you to him. He's been . . . shot.

He never said he was _dying_. I jumped to that conclusion on my own. I also spent the night crying and begging God to save him. I felt stupid. I hate feeling stupid.

Killian stood with his arms folded looking so smug that I wanted to punch him in his arrogant face. Instead, I whirled around to confront Dec who promptly threw up his hands in surrender with a devastating flash of dimples. I heaved a loud sigh and stalked to the window. Damn him for being so adorable. I wanted to be pissed at someone. Dec loped over and wrapped me in a full body hug. The familiar strange energy flowed into me, slowing my racing heart, scattering my angry thoughts.

I stomped on his foot. "Stop that!"

He dropped me like a hot potato. "Ouch! That's just mean. I'm trying to help."

"Really? News flash—knocking me out isn't helpful. You could help by explaining what happened to Sean, and what kind of bio-engineering miracles you guys are."

Killian frowned. "Bio-what? What are you talking about?" His brows were knit with genuine confusion.

"Your parents haven't been messing with your DNA or teaching you to use previously-untapped portions of your brains? Maybe you've learned to use undiscovered psychic abilities, aura control, telekinesis; something like that? Come on, it makes sense."

" _Parents?_ " He pinned Dec with a hard stare. "Dec? What the hell is she yapping about?"

Flushing pink, Dec replied with an edge to his voice, "Yeah, it's okay—she knows about our parents—and their work in _Switzerland_."

"Oh? Which one of you told her? You know it was supposed to be a secret! _Dad's_ going to kill us."

"It's okay, Killian. I won't tell anyone about your cover. Believe it or not, I don't want to see any of you get hurt—not even you."

He looked strangely amused by that. "Well, that's a relief. Thanks."

A movement caught his eye, and he glanced over at the bed. One corner of his mouth twisted into a relieved smile. "And he lives. Nice to see you breathing, bro."

To me, Killian said, "See? It's a friggin' miracle."

I've never been so glad to see anything as I was to see Sean's blue eyes, open and shining. He was alive and looked almost healthy. I was so relieved that I started crying again. It was just too much emotion and too little sleep. I lost it. I just sat there with my head lowered, tears running down my face. Shushing me quietly, Dec picked me up and laid me next to Sean. I curled up against Sean's side and cried some more. Dec and Killian left us alone.

The touch of fingers caressing my cheek brought me out of a deep sleep. The fingers were light and warm against my flushed skin, and I tingled everywhere they traveled. The pain of my crying jag gradually vanished as if someone wiped it away. It felt so good that I didn't want to open my eyes and ruin the moment, so I pretended to sleep some more. What would he do? In response to my unasked question, he traced the shape of my face, trailing his fingers down my neck to my exposed collarbone. The warmth spread everywhere he touched me, and my next thoughts were something like, _how would that heat feel buried inside of me_ . . .

Whew! I blushed hotly and opened my eyes to find his face only inches away, his eyes sparkling with suppressed laughter. I blushed even more, and he burst out laughing.

"Don't laugh! You'll hurt yourself!"

"I'm okay, darlin'. It'll take more than that to take me out. I'm feeling a lot better now. Look." He pointed at his stomach. The scorch marks were gone, and the area was simply reddened. It looked a _lot_ better. The skin around it was healthy looking with the beautiful golden tan he always had. Glancing further down, it seemed like his whole body was that color. But how did he heal so fast? Another minor miracle? What was up with these guys? If not bio-engineering, then where did they get these abilities?

He shifted his position, forcing my mind back to the bed. He was completely naked under that sheet. I had been draped over him during my embarrassing crying jag and didn't even realize what I was doing. I snuck a peek at him now and was a little disappointed that he was covered up. My whole body blushed, and I was sure I would set us both on fire with it. Sean responded by pulling me next to him so he could curl up around my back with his arms wrapped around me.

"Mica, I'm so sorry you've had to see me like this. You've got a heart like a warrior, and I am so proud of you. You've dealt with so much pain of your own this year, and you've found your strength. But when I was . . . asleep, I sensed your fear for me. I don't want to ever be the cause of your pain." He ran his hand down my arm and entwined our fingers. "I know you have a million questions, but for now, I want to share something with you. Will you let me give you peace? It won't hurt, I promise. Trust me?"

"With my life."

I was admiring his hands when I noticed the tips of his fingers beginning to glow very softly. My breath hitched, and he hushed me.

"Just be still. You'll like this."

As I gazed in amazement, the faint light radiated from his fingers to envelope my hand like a glove. I was speechless as it flowed up and across every inch of our bodies, until we were completely cocooned within the soothing heat. I surrendered to the pulsing energy, feeling my muscles relax and go liquid around my bones. They felt hollow and light as if I could float away. My skin was warm and tingling; my senses heightened until I felt my blood surging through my veins and arteries. A sense of power and strength infused me; I felt like I could fly or run for miles. It was intoxicating.

_That's it. Just relax and let it take you._ Sean's voice seemed to purr inside my mind.

I was floating away . . .

Let yourself go. I've got you anchored. It's okay.

I want to fly . . . No, not fly . . . I want to sink deeper into you . . . I want to be surrounded by you inside and out. I want to feel you inside of me.

Oh baby, you're killing me . . .

And with that thought, Sean leaped off the bed to stand horrified in the middle of the room. The abruptness of our separation left me blinking like an owl.

"No! It's not possible! No way!" Pacing and shoving his fingers through his hair, he muttered, "This is crazy."

"What on earth is the matter with you?" My skin was tingling like when the blood runs back into your foot after it falls asleep. Ouch. I shook out my arms and legs while watching him out of one eye. _Clearly_ there was something wrong. His horrified expression was almost funny.

As though he suddenly remembered I was there, he whipped around, demanding, "Did you hear? Did you feel it? The connection? I didn't know that could happen. This is not good!"

"All I felt was very turned on. I think we should do that again. Things were just getting interesting." I gave my best sexy smile and patted the bed.

His expression went from concentration to horror again. "Absolutely not! I don't know what I was thinking."

I thrust my lip into a pout, trying to look seductive to distract him, and he fell for it. Sort of. He stopped frowning at me. Of course, that may also have been the moment he realized he wasn't wearing the sheet . . .

# Chapter 11: The Truth is Out There

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FREAKING MIND?" Killian's sharp question drew me up short just outside the kitchen. Uh-oh. He was totally pissed. I slid against the wall. What happened?

"Oh, back off! How was I supposed to know that would happen? It's not like I've done it before!" Sean was edgy, and I heard him shove one of the wooden chairs backwards.

I hovered in the hallway for a few seconds struggling with the urge to turn around, and the urge to eat. My stomach growled loudly so I gave in to the primal urge for food. I peeked into the room. I spotted Killian first and nearly smiled. He sat with a glass of orange juice and alternated between glaring at it and shaking his head at Sean. Sean, on the other hand, was completely shut down. He didn't touch his food and stared without seeing. I didn't know what to make of either of them.

Dec, as usual, grinned crookedly when I finally bounced into the room—bounced being the operative word. I felt better than I had in years. My blood was still singing from whatever we did, and I couldn't help noticing how I glowed. I looked so damn healthy! My skin was clear and soft and hydrated. My hair was glossy and heavy. Even my nails were pretty. I looked like I had spent the day at a spa and downed a bunch of vitamins. The oddest thing was the intense clarity inside my mind.

Suddenly I could _see_ everything more clearly. Fuzzy impressions were sharp. I could finally define my own feelings, and I had no doubts. I just _knew_ . . . what I knew, exactly, wasn't clear though. It was like knowing all the answers but not having the questions yet. I was buoyant, relishing this new feeling. Very cool . . . I bounced into a seat, practically vibrating with energy. Maybe I should go run ten miles or so? Yes! Good plan. As soon as I eat, I'm going for a run. And then a hike? A hike sounded good too.

"So, uh, darlin'—how're you feeling just now?" Dec's accent was more pronounced than ever. He was watching me like I might explode.

I threw him a huge grin and drummed my fingers on the table. "I feel fabulous! I've never felt so alive." I leaned halfway over the table to see him better. "Do you have _any_ idea how gorgeous your eyes are?" Barely able to sit still, I swept my eyes across the three of them. "Wow—your eyes—so many colors!" I'd never seen such beauty. How had I missed this before?

"Sonofafuckingbitch!" Killian stood up so fast his chair fell over. With two strides, he hauled me out of my seat and lifted me up so we were eye to eye. We were so close I felt his heart beat against my chest.

Instead of being angry, he seemed hesitant. "Something has changed in you. I feel it." We were nose to nose, and he looked deeply into my eyes as if he was trying to read my mind or maybe my soul. Finally satisfied, he said, "This is very important, Mica. You could be dangerous to all of us so take this seriously. Tell me what you _feel_." The order was soft, but his velvety voice sent a tingle of fear down my spine.

"I don't know how to describe it exactly. It's like suddenly everything is clear to me. I _know_ things, but I can't define them yet. Like the questions are just out of reach. The answers are here." I tapped my temple and met his eyes again.

I wanted to say more, but his eyes robbed me of words. I could see every tiny detail of the iris. Usually a person's eyes just look blue, or green, or brown. His were filled with every shade of blue imaginable, and I could clearly see each color now. Each color was distinctly shaped, like a piece of a puzzle. They were breathtaking.

"So beautiful . . ." I touched my fingertip to the soft skin beneath his eye.

Killian grunted, "Never mind that. Look into my eyes and tell me what you see."

At first, I saw only the mesmerizing colors, but the more I studied them, the more I understood _him_. As I peered more deeply, the puzzle pieces parted to reveal more. Not individual thoughts exactly, but the core of who he is. What was I seeing? Was this intuition, or was I actually seeing into his soul, the essential part of Killian?

He made an encouraging sound and stroked his thumb along my bicep, the hypnotic gesture lulling me to a daze. When he spoke again, his voice was soft and velvety, the command impossible to resist. "Open your mind."

Nodding slowly, I let conscious thought drift away until I was bombarded with impressions that made my head swim. Words and images flooded my mind, spinning around like a pinwheel—righteous, powerful, loyal, warrior. The images played like a movie set in fast forward; one scene after another unfolded so quickly I barely saw the details:

A faded red door opened to reveal Killian beating the hell out of a big man with a gun until the man fell and stayed down. Beside them, a wounded man lay in the street. This man was a good guy, a victim. Killian carefully lifted him to safety, and the scene changed to a dark alley

Heavy rain blurred my vision, but I saw his furious expression and a silver knife dripping with blood as he yanked it from a monster with claws. The corpse turned to ash that melted into the asphalt with the rain.

My heart clenched as another image showed Sean hit with a ball of fire and falling backwards into nothingness. Killian's eyes burned as he slung Sean over his shoulder and vanished.

The scene faded into a room full of men gathered around a table covered with plans. There was respect in their eyes. He was the leader. It was clear that he had a mission, and it was more important than I had known before.

The final image was more impression than actual scene—I saw him as he sees himself, his identity I suppose— _Primani_.

"Primani . . ." I murmured.

As that last impression ricocheted around my head, several things happened at once. White as a sheet, Killian wrenched his eyes away and staggered backward. With my legs like jelly and my thoughts careening around my head like a pinball machine, I collapsed in a heap on the floor, babbling incoherently.

"Mica!" Sean dragged me hard against his chest, clutching me close, murmuring in my ear, "It's okay. Everything's going to be okay."

The kitchen undulated until it turned onto its side. I barely made it to the sink before I threw up. Gripping the counter, I tried desperately to get my head and stomach back under control. My legs still didn't want to hold me up, and I sank to my knees with a pathetic groan.

"Someone please stop this ride. I want to get off."

"Shh. It's okay." Dec captured my face between his hands and rested his lips against my forehead. "Breathe now—in and out . . . in and out—carefully, sweetheart." The faintest scent of the forest tickled my nose as his gentle voice surrounded me. I took a careful breath and followed his voice like an angel.

"That's it. In and out . . . in and out. Listen to me. Follow my voice."

Gradually, the pinball feeling lessoned until it went away entirely. My head felt normal again. I sagged weakly and he hugged me close.

"It gets easier. You'll see." Dec was ever the optimist.

The room was completely silent for a few minutes. Having been lost in my own thoughts, I realized all three of them were staring at me.

"Stop staring at me. It's creepy."

I looked at Sean and raised an eyebrow. "I need some fresh air, and I think it's time for some answers."

I might have been up for answers, but I wasn't really ready to walk. I staggered into the wall, so Sean scooped me up and carried me, saying, "Relax. I'm fine. It'll take us forever if you try to walk. You're still wobbling on your feet."

Rolling my eyes, I grimaced at the truth of that. "This is all your fault."

Grinning down at me, he shrugged. "Of course it is. It's always the guy's fault. I get that."

We headed into the woods behind their house. The trees had turned in the miracle of fall; the red and yellow maples were impressive. It was quiet and peaceful as we wandered the narrow paths. The tinkling sound of water got louder as we rounded a stray boulder. He sat me down so we could pick our way down the little incline to the rocks of the streambed. There were several large flat boulders lying around so we hopped over to one and sat down. It was comfortable and private. I assumed Sean was gathering his thoughts, so I reined in the urge to bombard him with questions. This was his secret to tell, and I wasn't going to rush him. My new sense of clarity made me realize that I was a part of this too, so I would get all the answers I needed, when I needed them. I'd like them all now, thank you very much.

Sean enfolded my hand between his and squeezed. "Do you know this is the hardest thing I've ever done? I don't know where to start. Why don't you tell me what you'd like to know? Maybe that will be easier?"

"Okay, what's the force field for?"

He flashed a quick smile. "It's not a force field; it's just energy. We call it our _saol_. It means _life_. For us, it's our life force. But in simple terms, it's only energy. There is energy everywhere, right? We've learned how to focus it when we need to. We rely on it to recharge when we're exhausted or injured. It helps us to heal faster."

"There's more to it than that. I know it. You're not just pulling energy to you—your bodies create it—or maybe, it's already inside of you. I'm not stupid, Sean. If you're going to tell me the truth, tell me the truth. If you can't tell me something, don't make up a story. That's not cool. I can handle secrets because you have a right to those; I can't handle lies."

He feathered his fingers through his hair, groping for words. "Do you remember my telling you that we're like operatives, and you asked if that meant spies?" I nodded. He continued, "Well, that's more or less what we do. We don't spy though; we watch. We have two jobs to do. First, we're here to make sure certain things happen that have an impact on future events, and we help people stay on their paths so they can fulfill their destinies."

"Like guardian angels?"

Shaking his head, he replied, "Not exactly, no. We're not angels, per se. It's really complicated, and I can't share a lot of it with you. But I _can_ say that we don't interfere unless it's vitally important to the greater good."

"Stand up and turn around."

"What? Why?"

"Just do it. I need to see something."

"Okaaay." Rising gracefully to his full height, he turned his back to me and shot a quizzical glance over his shoulder.

Before I lost my nerve, I yanked up his shirt. He sucked in his breath as the cold air struck him. I was afraid to look, but when I opened my eyes all I saw was smooth skin the color of fresh honey. I kissed him softly between his shoulder blades.

"Well, did I pass?" he asked with a playful grin.

"No wings?"

"No wings. Are you disappointed?"

"Not really, I think they would get in the way. Now, tell me about your second job?"

"That's a good question, and I hope you'll still be here after you hear the answer to it." He paused to take a deep breath. "Mica, you need to understand we're a lot less like _angels_ and a lot more like _soldiers_. We don't have wings and harps and other useless human inventions. We're part of an elite force of highly trained, lethal soldiers. We're assigned to a special operations division with a very unique mission. You've only met Killian and Dec. There are others who are a lot less, uh, friendly. We're serious about what we do and secrecy is absolutely critical. We don't have a lot of time for typical human activities. Our main job is to hunt down and destroy certain, uh, bad people . . . more killing, less fluff."

I considered that, and asked hesitantly, "What do you call yourselves?"

He looked relieved by the simple question. "Primani. We're called Primani—Soldiers of the First Legion." He touched my cheek with the backs of his fingers. "Keep this between us, would you? Killian will have fucking kittens if he finds out I told you this much. Psychic abilities are one thing. That's something I can talk about with you. Our Primani world isn't up for discussion. You can't say a word."

"I won't. I swear." I considered his serious, beautiful face. He was a contradiction. When he was with me like this, he was sweet and gentle. When he was in soldier-mode, he was fierce and hard and deadly. I was more than a little afraid of the soldier in him and shivered.

"Don't! Please don't ever be afraid of me. I would never hurt you—you have to know that by now." He reached out, cupping my face in the palms of his hands, eyes searching mine until he found the answer. The golden light in his eyes flashed brilliantly as the truth hit him and he lowered his mouth to mine.

He kissed me with yearning and tenderness; his lips soft against mine, drinking me in, showing me the love in his heart. Melting into his arms, I parted my lips and swept my tongue against his, inviting—no _demanding_ —a response. _Come on, Sean, lose control._ The animal growl low in his throat was exactly what I wanted. He banded a strong arm around my waist, lifting me against his erection, grinding us together until spots swam in my vision. Breathless and hungry, I clung to his shoulders to keep from falling. With a ragged breath, he finally dragged his mouth away and lowered it to my collarbone, spreading hot kisses along my goose pimpled skin. My head fell back as my blood began to simmer. "Sean, please. Don't stop this time."

"God, woman, you're killing me." Groaning low in his throat, he cupped my breast, kneading it softly. With the other hand, he pulled the zipper of my sweatshirt down. I was bare underneath it. He pulled his eyes back to mine. I searched his eyes, but his mind was closed to me.

"What are you thinking?" I whispered.

"You're so beautiful it takes my breath away."

"I love you."

"And I love you," he said wistfully. Then he zipped up my sweatshirt and pulled me to my feet.

# Chapter 12: Mind Games

I MIGHT BE IN LOVE, but I'm not blind and definitely not stupid. Sean, Dec, and Killian weren't normal. There wasn't any denying that. Sean called them Primani. According to him, they were not-quite-angels who fight for good and annihilate evil. They were some kind of elite operations unit who kept people on track for the greater good—whatever the hell _that_ is. Put that way, it sounded hokey and not too plausible. Did that mean they didn't really have parents who worked in Switzerland? Was that only a cover story? Were they really from Ireland? They had the accent, but what did that prove? He'd been spoon feeding me bits and pieces of his version of the truth for months. Was anything that Sean had told me actually true?

Angels? Psychic powers?

There was no doubt in my mind about their _abilities_. They could heal people and calm people. Dec was especially good at that. And I was pretty sure they could read minds and teleport. I had the distinct feeling that Killian knew what I was thinking most of the time. His comments seemed a little too pointed sometimes. I hadn't proven the teleport part, but it seemed like they could show up suddenly—like the night Dec appeared out of nowhere to catch me when I was knocked out by Scott Flynn. How did he do that? I added that to the long mental list of things to ask Sean the next time he felt chatty.

Then there was the _saol_ that surrounded them. They could control it and had to turn it off to touch people without shocking them. It seemed to be stronger when they were angry. The night that Sean was shot, Dec had been vibrating with anger, and had warned me not to touch him. He said it wasn't safe for me. Did he have trouble controlling the power? Sean had learned to. He hadn't shocked me in a long time. He'd warned me that I was playing with fire. I was pretty sure I still was, but it was too late for me to stop. If it involved Sean, I would play with fire until I got blown up.

A light flashed outside my window, and Domino perked up, but I reached for the stun gun. I was more than ready to use it if Scott showed up here. Before I could blink, Sean was suddenly standing in front of me. He grabbed my hand, twirled me around, and dipped me so my hair pooled on the floor at his feet. He grinned wolfishly and kissed the tip of my nose before hauling me upright again.

"I _knew_ it! You teleported, didn't you?" I was torn between shock and awe.

"We don't call it that. It's a silly word." He shrugged, and added, "It's just a way to travel."

Yeah, sure, it's no big deal. People do it all the time.

He was incorrigible. Domino was standing with her paws wrapped around his waist, rubbing her head against his zipper. She was in love with him too. No doubt about that. I wanted to shove her out of the way and drape my own paws around him.

"I have news. Can we talk?"

"Absolutely." I patted the bed. "Come and sit with me."

Stretching his arm across the pillows behind us, he turned to drop a soft kiss on my lips, and said, "I've missed you this week."

"Oh, yeah?" I breathed, leaning into his space to deepen the kiss. "Not as much as I've missed you."

Shifting around, he cupped the back of my head, lacing his fingers through my hair, and devouring my mouth until we were both panting for air. The heat in his eyes took my breath away. He thumbed my lower lip and pulled back a few inches. My whole body sighed with disappointment.

"Hold that thought. I can't stay too long. Let me tell you what's happened. Killian and I took a trip to see our boss about you. What you did in the kitchen with Killian is unheard of. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. We were all a little wigged out by you."

I couldn't help the snicker that slipped out. _They were wigged out by me?_ Well, that can't be good. "What did your boss say? Did he know what happened?"

Sean smiled, the expression not as warm as I'd like. He seemed more subdued than usual and that was saying something. "The working hypothesis is that you connected to my power when I wrapped you in my _saol_. Probably the energy unlocked some neurons in your brain that everyone has, but never use. They got turned on like a switch." He frowned and added, "You're welcome."

"I don't know what to say. Is this good? Bad?"

"You didn't realize we heard each other's thoughts, did you?"

"No, I didn't know we weren't speaking out loud. I just assumed. Is that why you freaked out?"

He took my hand and kissed it. "Yes, that's exactly why I freaked out! I was having a panic attack trying to control what I started and suddenly you're inside my head answering my thoughts. Wouldn't that freak you out?"

"Yeah, but wait . . . Don't you hear mine all the time? That's not fair." Not only not fair, but oh so very wrong on every possible level.

He chuckled, and said, "No, I can't hear your thoughts all the time. God knows I'd never get out of bed if I could!" He deftly caught my hand in mid-swing.

"Oh, yeah, right. But really, can you read my thoughts?"

"I could if I really concentrated, but honestly, I don't want to intrude like that. We don't do that unless we absolutely need information. We can tell with a quick look inside whether a person has good or bad intentions, and that's really what we pay attention to. It's more like intuition than mind reading."

We were both quiet for a little while as I absorbed what he shared with me. "What did I see when I looked into Killian's eyes?"

"You saw what he let you see."

"Were those memories?"

"More or less, I guess that's as good a label as any." He shrugged one shoulder.

"I saw him carry you away. It was so real."

"That's because it already happened and was clear in his mind. I have a theory that Killian let you see things that would help you to understand him and what we do. Believe it or not, he cares what you think of us. We decided that I'm going to have to stay close to you while we work this out. I'm afraid you might have picked up some other, uh, abilities from me. We should do some tests to make sure you're okay. Killian is afraid you're going to accidently do something dangerous."

"He doesn't trust me?"

"It's not that, exactly. But you're not used to these things. He's right to be cautious. He's been around awhile."

We spent the next few hours talking over some of these _abilities_ , and I tried to do a few things. I was hugely disappointed that I couldn't teleport or generate my own little energy field. Did that mean I didn't have a _saol_? I couldn't recreate the glow that Sean did so easily. My face was purple, and I panted with the effort until he finally sighed and told me to forget it. He looked pointedly at the stun gun and suggested I keep carrying it if I wanted to shock someone.

Eventually we sat facing each other, cross-legged on the floor. He wanted to see if I could read his thoughts. Peering into his eyes was like falling into the sea. Wide and upturned at the corners, they were fringed with thick black lashes. His pupils were tiny inside the beautiful blues of the iris. The glimmering gold flecks were more pronounced as he opened himself up to me. Breathing deeply, he gazed intently into my eyes, and the bond between us tightened. I clutched his leg as the visions took over.

Like before, I was overwhelmed with the sensation of spinning in my mind. Images and thoughts spun randomly, and I couldn't see anything clearly.

"Focus, baby, just relax and slow down the spin. You can do this."

Like struggling to stand up in violent surf, I steeled my mind to slow down the chaos. Gradually, the images became more coherent, flowing like an old movie. They were jerky at first, but at least I could see them clearly.

I saw Sean as he fought fiercely in a snowy wood, striking someone and dodging the glimmer of a knife. His face was cold and completely focused as he took out his opponent without mercy. Next, he and Dec carried two small children from a burning building. Then I saw him fighting back to back with Killian. The ball of flame struck him in the stomach, and he collapsed. A wave of emotion hit me in the chest, and I gasped. I almost lost him! He could've died! Could've _died_ . . . The images wavered, breaking apart, drifting away.

He squeezed my fingers, keeping eye contact. "No emotions. Focus now. Don't lose the grip. Hold the vision. I've got you."

With sheer force of will, I got my emotions back in control. The images were playing again. I saw myself running through endless woods crying for help. In this scene, I was very far away from Sean. He was watching me. Suddenly, the images ran together so fast I could only see blurry impressions—my body lying bloody on the floor in the abandoned house; then lying motionless in the hospital; then asleep in my bed. Next I saw my terrifying run through the forest to the beach. Then I was on the deck of a sailboat beckoning like a siren. Finally, I was lying naked under Sean, joined as lovers, back arched, head flung back. As with Killian, I saw both images and words. This time, I was left with impressions of one word branded into my head, the essence of Sean.

Primani.

Sean blinked, and the contact was broken. As before, I was sick. The room spun until I puked in the trash can beside the bed, but then it kept spinning and I was sick again and again. "Make it stop!"

The next thing I knew, Dec was holding my head between his hands again.

He sounded amused as he said, "Just breathe, darlin'—in and out . . . in and out." He peered over his shoulder at Sean, and said, "You should probably learn how to do this yourself. She's _your_ girlfriend."

After an eternity, the room was still, and my head felt normal again. I lurched to the bathroom to wash up. When I got back, Dec was gone.

"How do you feel now?"

"I feel weirded out right now. Is this dizziness normal? I don't like it."

"Not for us. We had to learn to control the speed of the images, but we don't have trouble with dizziness. I think your brain is only partly wired to do this. Maybe practice would help you with control. Another thing is you can't just walk up to someone and read their minds. They have to participate and let you in. We don't have that problem either. We can make eye contact with someone and see what we need to see pretty fast. But this is all new for you—and us too. We thought only Primani had this particular psychic ability. You're breaking new ground."

I nibbled on my lip, thinking over the visions I just saw. "Sean, how long have you been watching over me?"

He unfolded his big body and stalked to the window. After staring into the darkness for a few minutes, he turned around, his face seeming older than usual. "I've been watching you since the night your mother died. Her death started a chain of events that had to play out for you. Most of those events were ordinary life things and not anything that would hurt you permanently. But then there was an _unexpected_ event that got you off the path, and we had to help you."

"Scott Flynn?" I felt a little pang in my stomach.

His jaw tightened, and he explained, "His attack sent you into a spiral that would have destroyed you. Your recklessness was just beginning when we stepped in. Later, it would have been catastrophic. We had no choice but to interfere with your life. I hope you don't hate us for that someday."

"Why would I hate you? Things have turned out okay. Mostly."

"You'll see there are worse things than death." He rolled his tense shoulders and stretched.

"You tried to stay away, didn't you? You were so angry with me all the time."

His mouth twisted sardonically. "Not angry with you; I was angry with myself. I wasn't supposed to get to know you; it's not how we usually work. But you kept getting into trouble. The three of us were sent here to keep an eye on you, but I couldn't do it from a distance. Do you have any idea how much pain you put me through? I've never felt these kinds of emotions before. You make me crazy!"

I had to bite back a smile after that outburst. Instead, I nodded seriously, and asked, "So if I'm such as pain in the ass, why are you still hanging around?"

"You're not the only reason we're here, Mica. As much as I'd like to focus all my time and attention on you, I've got other ops that I'm responsible for. That's why I was gone last summer."

I arched a brow. "I don't suppose you want to share the deets on that?"

"Nope. You don't have a need to know, love."

# Chapter 13: Curiosity and Cats

I'M PSYCHIC. How cool is that? After listening to Sean's theories and Googling my ass off, I'm sure of it. Psychic? Huh. My life just took a sharp turn towards crazy. Apparently, shit really does happen. So now what? Sean said I could get more control if I practiced. Soooo, that's exactly what I want to do. Practice makes perfect . . . but on whom?

Domino was lying prone on the bed watching me pace. If I didn't know better, I'd swear she was mocking me. She seemed to be smiling, and every now and then she wagged her tail for no apparent reason. I stopped to examine her face. She had intelligent eyes. They were beautiful too. I rubbed her ears playfully. Did dogs have minds? If they did, then they would have thoughts, right? Dogs had memories. That was a no-brainer. I wonder . . . I was staring into space, lost in thought for a minute. Finally, I cleared my daydreams to get down to business. I changed position so I could see directly into her irises and tried to focus.

She got up and left the bed. _Don't even think about it_.

"Hey! Come back here."

Nope.

Well, crap. Plan B? I thumbed out a text to the only friend I have who wouldn't assume I had lost my sanity. Dani showed up about ten minutes later. I was literally vibrating with excitement the second I heard the sound of tires on the driveway. I was going to tell her all about my weekend and my shiny new psychic powers.

"Well, what are you so excited about? Did something happen with Sean? Oh, my God! Did you guys do it?" She bounced up and down with way too much enthusiasm.

What? "Geez, no; I would've texted you with something that important."

Her dimples collapsed. "Oh, that's too bad. So what's the news then?"

"You're not going to believe this—I—" I started to tell her, but something made me hesitate. As excited as I was to share this secret, I couldn't. _Will you keep our secret, Mica?_ He trusted me to keep his secrets. I felt like a jerk. I didn't have the right to share this with anyone; not even Dani. I pictured Dec's soft blue eyes and serious face while he held my head for me. He took care of me. He was gentle and kind when I needed him. He'd protected and defended me. Aw hell, they all had. Even the asshole Killian went out of his way to keep me safe from Scott. I was a traitor. I couldn't betray their trust. I sighed. Damn it! I couldn't tell her. So I settled on something else.

Lying through my teeth, I said much more calmly, "I read an article about mind reading. I've always wanted to do that. Don't you think that would be cool?"

She nodded, confused at the change in my excitement. "Um, sure. Yeah, that would be kind of fun. Is that why you called? You couldn't tell me that over the phone?"

"No! I think we should try it out on each other! Wouldn't it be so awesome if we could learn to read minds?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Domino retreating to the doorway. Killjoy.

After a few minutes of talking about the mechanics of mind reading, we decided to give it a shot. With my devious plan in place, I volunteered to try first. As I set us up across from each other, I felt a tiny little pang of guilt, but I was determined to practice. Other than my throwing up an organ or two, what's the worst that could happen? If Dec was right, I could learn to do this. And _that_ would be amazing.

Dani had clear gray eyes with thick rings around the iris. I've looked at her a million times. How could I have missed this? They were so pretty, and I hadn't even noticed before. I held her hands to stay balanced and got ready to focus.

"Okay, Dani, just sit still and look into my eyes."

At first, nothing happened. I didn't see anything beyond the eyes themselves. She shifted her weight and blinked.

"Don't blink! You have to stay really still. Just gaze ahead and relax." I tried to keep my voice quiet.

"Well, hurry up then. My eyes are drying out."

I tried again. Peering more deeply, I opened my mind, reaching for her subconscious. Deeper—just a little farther—here we go . . . Suddenly, everything clicked. Random images swirled around in chaos. I struggled to settle the images. After a second, I forced them into a slower moving flow, but they were blurry. There were snatches of vivid green trees blending into burning fires that morphed into grey stone caverns. Nothing looked to be from our world. These impressions were alien and strange as if they were completely imaginary. I saw no memories of people or landmarks I recognized. How was this Dani? It didn't make sense, but before I could blink, I lost control of the spinning impressions, and soon they bombarded me like bees. Something snapped behind my right eye. With a cry, I tore myself away, jamming my palms into my eye sockets, trying to crush the unbearable pain and crazy dizziness.

Paralyzed with agony, I curled into a ball as the disjointed images of Dani's mixed with my own nightmares and thundered through my head. Scott Flynn appeared as a disfigured monster, expanding and contracting in the midst of a burnt alien landscape. Suddenly my thoughts and memories were gone. There were only nightmarish pictures ripping across my vision. I tried to focus on Sean, but I couldn't see him. I couldn't pull any of my memories into focus. My mind was out of my control. Spinning and spinning . . .

Dec's visage flashed like a beacon. I wasn't up to yelling so I gasped his name with my forehead anchored to the floor.

Warm breath tickled my cheek. Dec. He was using his thumbs to massage my temples and the delicate bones around my eyes. It felt heavenly.

I felt his chest tense with anger. "Good, you're alive. What the hell were you thinking? Are you _trying_ to kill me?" His thumbs were working magic even through his scolding.

I tried to turn my head, but he jammed it back into his lap. I croaked, "I tried to practice . . . you know what." I looked around. "Where's Dani?"

"I sent her home. I told her you had a seizure, but she shouldn't worry about you." He was gritting his teeth. His fingers tightened on my temple, and I winced. Ow.

"And she bought that? She would never leave me if she thought I was sick."

"I can be very persuasive. She didn't have a _choice._ I'm not happy about that either. You put me in very bad position tonight. It's not cool to adjust Dani's memories. I hate doing that. I hope it was worth it."

"Oh, Dec, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for anything bad to happen. I just—" I started to explain, but he cut me off.

"Never mind the apologies. Just tell me everything that happened. Don't hold anything back."

I told him about the nightmare of uncontrolled chaos and how it escalated and got more violent. I shuddered as I told him about the stabbing pain in my eyes, and the overwhelming sensation of spinning. By the time I was done, I was crying in his arms as he patted my back awkwardly. The sound of another voice stopped me cold.

" _Dec_? What the hell are _you_ doing here?"

"Killian, it's not what you think!" I tried to get up, but Dec pushed me back.

"Sit!"

With one last pointed look, he drew Killian into the bathroom. Killian was livid and didn't bother to hide it. I curled back into a fetal position and tried to lie still. My head felt odd, and my eye was twitching. Worst of all, I felt guilty and stupid. What was I thinking? I had no idea it was so dangerous. I was an idiot.

Five minutes later, Killian read me the riot act _and_ raked me over the coals. He had no sympathy for a stupid girl who was determined to play with fire. How did it feel to get burned? Was it worth the pain, the danger? Did I want to destroy my mind? What about Dani? Didn't I care about her? Wasn't she supposed to be a friend? How could I put her in danger like this? What if I had passed out before calling for Dec? He went on and on with the scolding and accusations. He didn't even need to raise his voice.

I got the point. I had no argument, no defense. I was a terrible person. I sucked. Damn. I was trying to get angry, but he was right. I was wrong. I sat stone-faced while I got my butt chewed. Eventually he wound down and slowed his pacing.

I finally noticed he was wearing black camouflage pants and a black t-shirt with black boots. He looked like a commando. He was armed too. The bulge of a pistol tucked under his shirt was unmistakable. He hadn't shaved, and his jaw was shadowed. If possible, he looked more lethal than before. I gulped. Who _was_ this guy? If I didn't know he was protecting me, I would be terrified of him.

"You should _always_ be afraid of me!" he snapped in my face.

I had nothing witty to say to that. _Did he just read my mind?_ I knew it!

Warming to his subject, he lectured me some more. "What you did was irresponsible. Dangerous. We can't fucking babysit you, Mica. You do this again and you'll find yourself in a padded cell—or _worse_. Am I clear?"

Dec interrupted. "Uh, hey, I think she's still in some pain. I should probably finish healing her before, uh, we leave."

Killian growled, "Whatever," and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

Brushing his lips across my forehead, Dec closed his eyes to concentrate. With hands on either side of my head, he pressed gently into my temples. A warm pulse of energy flowed beneath my skin as his fingers drifted over my skull, around my cheekbones, along my jaw. My blood flowed smoothly under the surface but with more urgency than usual. I recognized the _saol_ immediately and surrendered to it. Through my eyelids, I saw a faint light that wasn't there before. Was that his power moving through me? Dec moved his fingers across my eyes again and paused under my right eye socket. With a burst of heat, the pain was gone, and his hands were still.

His mouth tickled my ear as he murmured, "All better, darlin'."

When I opened my eyes, he relaxed into a breathtaking smile and winked.

Killian snorted impatiently across the room. "This conversation isn't over, but we have to leave. We have _important_ work to do." Peeling away from the wall, he stalked over and gripped my hands, forcing me up to meet his eyes.

"Don't try anything like that again! Leave your psychic abilities alone for now. You have no idea what could happen, and I don't have time to explain today. We have something urgent to take care of, and I can't send Dec back here to save your ass again anytime soon. I want your word on this. _Promise_ me."

It wasn't a request.

I could hardly meet his eyes so he shook me. "Okay, Killian, I promise. I feel horrible and stupid. I won't do it again! I don't want to be a distraction. I want you guys to be safe. I know what you do matters." Whatever it is . . .

He nodded curtly and motioned for Dec to join him at the door. He was wearing the same clothes as Killian from the t-shirt to the boots. Does he have a gun too? He raised his eyebrows when he caught me checking him out. He picked me up in a bear hug and pressed a kiss against my cheek. I felt the slight shock at the contact and looked at him with a question in my eyes.

" _Everyone_ matters, Mica. You're part of us now. I hope you're ready."

# Chapter 14: Welcome to the Family

I HADN'T SEEN SEAN in days. Was I mad? No. Not even a little. After the glimpses into his life I'd gotten recently, I accepted he was out working on whatever it was they worked on. I had no idea what they did exactly, but apparently it involved lots of traveling and guns. Mental note: frisk Sean.

Today was the day of Stefan's going away party. I wanted to bring Sean with me, but he wasn't back yet. I'd just have to go solo. At the moment, though, I was facing down a crisis of epic proportions. My closet was a mess. How can something so full be so empty? I couldn't decide what to wear. Jeans? Skirt? Cute little dress? The options were staggering. Nibbling on a nail, I stared at the mess. It was supposed to snow so jeans were a definite _yes_. I pulled out a hoodie and put it back. Not dressy enough. I grabbed a long-sleeved purple sweater. Hmm, maybe this would work. It was clingy and soft and made my boobs look bigger. I looked sideways in the mirror. I wasn't Betty Boop, but I looked pretty good. I'd wear the sweater. Ricki would approve. It was shaping up to be a great night.

A little later, I popped in my new Linkin Park CD and cranked up the volume. The thumping music pumped me up all the way to Dani's aunt's house. She had a big place outside of town and agreed to let us have the going-away party there. After all, Dani's family hosted Stefan and wanted to send him off in style.

"Mica! Hurry up! We're waiting for you!" Dani waved from the front porch. The sprawling house was lit warmly in welcome, and the front yard sparkled with Christmas lights. A fluffy layer of snow completed the Christmas card scene. I wished Sean was here to see it with me. Not that he'd probably be impressed; he was a guy, after all. Maybe he'd show up later. I hoped so because my heart was aching to see him.

Stefan appeared in the doorway behind Dani. He was smoking hot in a red sweater and jeans. His hair had grown out to curl up at the ends, the tips bleached by the summer sun. I would miss him but didn't regret anything that didn't happen between us. After the party on the fourth of July, he kept a respectful distance. I had demanded to know what Killian said to him, but he refused to explain. He just said he didn't want any trouble so we should be friends without benefits. I didn't mind that part of it, but the idea that Killian had butted in really pissed me off. Who did he think he was anyway?

Grinning hugely, I gave him a big hug that surprised him. He pulled back to lead me into the main room. There were already a lot of people here. I recognized Billy Powell and Don Thomas from English, and Amy Wan from my chem class. Two people I didn't know were sitting apart from the others. One was a tall, dark-haired bear of a guy. He wore a leather jacket and oversized jeans. He looked wary and uncomfortable. The other guy was as tall but had a rangy build. He had stringy blond hair that hadn't seen water in days. I didn't recognize either of them. I asked Stefan if he invited them. He thought they were friends of one of Dani's cousins. That's strange. Before I could figure it out, Ricki and Kevin showed up and cranked up the music.

The place was packed within an hour, and I was making my rounds. The living room was so full of people dancing that I had to turn sideways to weave my way through. The regular lights were replaced with club lights. The music was loud, and the lights were flickering to the beat. Everyone seemed to be having a great time. A couple gyrating on the dance floor caught my attention. The girl was wearing a really short skirt, which was hiked up to her crotch, and the guy was taking full advantage of the easy access. Their faces were hidden by the curtain of her long blond hair. Wow—get a _room_ , people! They were practically doing it in the middle of the crowd. Who were they? I didn't recognize either of them. It was hard not to watch, though—my body responded with an ache that set my teeth on edge. I groaned to myself. Where was _my_ boyfriend? This was torture. I started to turn away when a voice spoke into my ear.

"I have a message for you."

I swung around in surprise and saw the guy in the leather jacket looming over me. I planted my feet, ready to swing at him or dodge the other way. He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. Instead of attacking me, he gripped my arm, pulling me towards the patio door. I tried to jerk my arm back, but he only dug his fingers in more deeply. I reared back to clock him with my fist, but he froze me with the point of a knife against my side.

Pinning me to the wall, he put his mouth against my ear, and whispered harshly, "Oh, stop fighting me. I'm not interested in you. I need to give you a message for your friends. Trust me. You want to hear this . . . unless you don't care about your friends . . . You _do_ care about them, don't you?"

Oh crap, now what? My instincts were screaming that going outside was a bad idea, but my curiosity was peaked. What kind of message? Was this a trick? Would I go outside to find Scott Flynn and his merry band of psychopaths? I didn't have much time to think it through as he was towing me along, and we were soon outside in relative quiet. He let me go as soon as we got to the patio. I stood with my back to the door, resisting the urge to rub my arm. I looked around warily, but we were alone.

"Okay, so what's the big message?"

"Tell your friends to stop fucking with us or someone's going to die."

"What friends are you talking about?"

He barked a laugh. "Don't play stupid with me. You know exactly who I'm talking about." He leaned into my face like he was sharing a secret. "And here's the thing, _Mica_ _Thomas_. When I say _someone,_ I really mean _you_. So don't fuck around with me. Just give them the message and pray to your God they listen." With that, he turned around and vanished.

"Oh, yeah? Well get in line. Everyone wants to kill me!" I yelled into empty space.

I drooped against the wall with the back of my hand across my eyes. I focused on breathing for a full minute. Breathe in, breathe out. I am _not_ having a good year! Why does _everyone_ want to _kill_ me? It was starting to piss me off. Okay, there's no reason to panic. So what if another creep wants to kill me? I rolled my eyes at the thought. It wouldn't be the first time. This time, though, I didn't know who the creep was. I had no idea what was going on, other than I was being used as leverage. I didn't know if my death would stop Sean's mission. They had work to do, and I was an added complication. I didn't want to cause them trouble, but I also didn't want to die. What to do? What to do?

I yanked out my phone and sent Sean a text to call me _NOW_. I paced back and forth for a whole minute, but he didn't call. I hit the send button again but still no response. What if he was out of range? Damn.

Feeling silly, I looked up at the sky, and said hesitantly, "Sean? If you can hear me, come quick. We've got a big problem."

I could call for Dec, but Killian said he needed Dec someplace else. I was afraid to distract them. What if they were in the middle of a fight or something? I didn't want them to get hurt. Visions of flamethrowers flashed in my mind. I could still see Killian carrying Sean away from the fight. It would break my heart to see any of them hurt like that again. Shivering in the cold, I sat on the patio trying to come up with some options. I totally lost track of time and nearly jumped out of my skin when I sensed I wasn't alone. Out of the corner of my eye, a light, like a flashlight, winked and then vanished again. I knew what that was!

Three shapes appeared and gradually took form as they got closer to the house lights. Framed by the shadows, Primani eyes leading the way, they moved as one taut and lethal machine. Dressed for a mission, they were spattered with something that looked like ash. All three pairs of eyes blazed with that stunning electric blue flame. It was unnerving to see the three of them together as if they had just come from some kind of battle. Their faces were rigid as they scanned the property with those terrible eyes. I wanted to run to Sean, but I was rooted in place as they focused on something over my head and behind me. I wasn't sure if they knew I was there or not. I'd really hate to get shot before the thug could carry out his death threat.

Before I could twitch, Sean pulled me into his arms. I was so glad to see him in one piece that I hung on for dear life. Whoa. He was burning up and his heart was racing impossibly fast. How was he not dead?

"Oh, my God. You're so hot!" I pulled back and scanned his skin for signs of imminent combustion.

His eyes weren't as bright and his expression had softened to more or less human. He was calming down already.

"That's what I hear." He winked and dipped his head to kiss me.

It was almost a total transformation. Fascinating . . .

"You rang?" Dec showed his dimples and pushed a stray lock of hair off of his forehead. The patch of skin under his hair was the only clean space on his entire face. He looked as if he'd been dunked in charcoal. Still scratching at his head, he gestured at my arm, warning, "You might want to clean that off, darlin'."

On cue, my forearms began to tingle. And then they started to itch. And it went downhill from there. Expecting to see a mosquito or some other creepy-crawling eating me, I brushed at my skin, smearing the ash into my pores. Within seconds, it felt like my skin was on fire.

"What is this? It's burning me!" I was frantically brushing at my clothes. "Get it off!"

"Shit." Sean looked down at himself before yanking my sweater over my head.

'Sean! What the hell?" Shocked and embarrassed, I was left in jeans and a very tiny bra in front of Dec and Killian. Dec politely turned his head. Killian came closer and muttered something I didn't understand. He picked up my arm to study the skin. It was pretty dark so I don't know what he saw. Was it red? Blistered? It felt like it was melting off.

A couple of voices interrupted my panic, and I lurched away, intending to sprint to a handy bush for cover before someone got cute with a cellphone.

"You're a magnet for trouble, aren't you?" Killian shook his head with resignation and grabbed me with both hands. "Come on."

It happened so fast. One minute I was standing on the patio, and the next I was in the bathroom in their house. I didn't have time to feel disoriented since I was dragged into a running shower as soon as my feet hit the floor.

Outside the shower curtain, Sean yelled helpful instructions. "Just take off your clothes and wash everything with soap. Rinse a lot. I don't think it'll kill you."

Normally, privacy is a good thing; however, my skinny jeans turned into plastic wrap as soon as they got wet. I pushed. I shoved. I yanked. They refused to budge. My skin burned like fire, the pain traveling wherever the water flowed. Once it reached my crotch, I lost it. Totally freaked out now, I threw the curtain back, and demanded, "Get these things off of me!"

Rolling his eyes to Heaven, he climbed in and squatted. Between my pushing and his pulling, my jeans finally slid free. We both fell backwards against the shower walls. I jumped up and frantically rubbed everything down with soap twice. When the soap was rinsed away, and I didn't feel any fresh pain, I opened my eyes.

Sean was still with me but barely. His eyes were closed as he let the hot water run down his clothes. Clinging to every muscle in his chest and shoulders, the filthy t-shirt was clean. His black hair was pressed against his skull. He had dark circles under his eyes and a long scratch up one side of his neck. He needed to shave. The dark shadow on his jaw made him look even more dangerous than usual. His hands were a mess. There were bruises across one set of knuckles and fingernail gouges on the wrist. One ring finger looked swollen and crooked as though it were broken. He was also asleep on his feet. How long had it been since he'd slept? Was he hurt anywhere else? I couldn't tell with all the clothes he was wearing.

I brushed my lips across his neck and wrapped my arms around his waist. In spite of his exhaustion, he curled his fingers over my hip and tucked me closer.

The sexy Irish lilt was stronger than ever when he murmured, "Don't worry for me, darlin'. I'm indestructible, remember?"

Much later, the sun woke me when it snuck through the blinds. I stretched across the bed only to find Sean's big, warm body lying in the way. Asleep on his side, he was facing away from me. His back was bare, but he was wearing shorts. I held the cotton material of his old t-shirt to my nose and breathed in. It smelled subtly of Sean. I stretched it over my butt, curled against him and went back to sleep.

A tickling along my cheek brought me out of a deep sleep. Snuggling closer, I wrapped my arms around Sean's waist. He was so warm and smooth. I ran my hands over the sleek ridges of his torso, and he sucked in his breath with a jerk.

"Mica . . ." he warned.

I slid my hands over his chest and back down to his stomach. He sucked in his breath and twitched. Was he _ticklish_? I allowed myself a naughty smile before I tickled him on purpose, just to be sure. He convulsed with helpless laughter and struggled to keep my hands off of him, but I was relentless. We were both laughing and twisting around on the bed when he suddenly pinned me under him and held my hands over my head.

"Not so cocky now, are you darlin'?" He grinned down at me and my heart melted. That smile was devastating.

I was stuck but didn't plan to give in gracefully. I tried to pull my hands free, but he leaned his weight against them. I tried to wriggle out from under him and he pressed his weight down. I was stuck. Stuck in the bed with Sean . . . hmm, suddenly this was not such a bad thing. Judging by the heavy weight wedged between my thighs, he was thinking the same thing. Smiling in triumph at finally getting him in the perfect position, I reached between us and wrapped my fist around the hot velvety flesh. His eyes closed in bliss. Encouraged by this reaction, I stroked him up one side and down the other, reveling in the miracle of silk covering steel. A tiny drop of moisture leaked from the tip and I instinctively swirled it over the head. The deep groan in his throat was enough to curl my toes. My heart began to thud, and his sped up to match the rhythm. I felt the beat against my chest; the vibration straight to my core. He dipped his head and kissed me. It was a long, slow, deliberate kiss that took my will away.

A loud knocking interrupted what could have been a major event in my life. I'm pretty sure I groaned in frustration, but Sean took it in stride.

"Okay, okay, we'll be out in a minute." To me, he said, "Come on, beautiful, there's work to do—time to get up."

"But . . . we can't waste _this_!" Frustrated beyond human belief, I caught his cock in my hand and clutched it like a toddler throwing a tantrum in the toy store.

He sat up and patted it like an old friend. It bobbed back and forth before resting against his abs. "Trust me. It'll get hard again. Fuck, it stands at attention every time you touch me." He straightened my pouting lip and added, "And sometimes when I'm only thinking about you."

The door cracked open, and Killian stuck his head inside. His expression was not friendly when he saw my flushed face and red lips. He didn't say anything then, but I knew we'd hear about it soon enough.

It felt like déjà vu when we walked into the kitchen. Dec and Killian were already eating. They had a bowl of hard-boiled eggs between them, and a carton of orange juice on the table. One of them had set out plates for us. Probably it was Dec's doing; he was the sweetest one of the bunch.

"Come and sit down. We've got food." Dec waved a hand over the table and added, "Do you want something else? We've got yogurt and cereal too. Help yourself. You're going to need some energy." He winked at the last part.

I opted for a fat-free yogurt. Hmmm. Interesting that the fridge is stocked with nothing but healthy things. There was fruit, yogurt, eggs, fat-free milk, and all kinds of fresh vegetables. No sign of lasagna or leftover takeout food. Who cooked around here?

I sat down and sucked on the end of my spoon for a minute before I asked, "So . . . I don't want to be nosy, but whose house is this, and where are your _parents_?"

Three shocked faces stared back at me. No one said a word for a long time. Sean glanced pointedly at Killian, and Killian glared back at him.

Dec burst out laughing. "Ha! I told you she would figure it out!" To me, he said, "I wondered how long it would take you to see through us. I knew you would, smart girl!" His face lit up with an ear-to-ear grin. He was pleased with himself.

"You don't really have parents, do you? I knew it. Why would you need parents if you've got superpowers and carry guns?"

Dec piped up. "Who said we have superpowers?" He rounded on Killian and Sean with completely fake indignation all over his face. "Am I the only one without superpowers?"

Sean grimaced and said, "Shut up, knucklehead."

They were so busted. I _knew_ the parent story was bullshit. They ran around in camouflage and armed to the teeth, for crying out loud. Primani? Was that story true? It felt right to me, but they could be mercenaries for all I really knew. I didn't see any evidence of angels—at least not _my_ interpretation of angels.

Killian's expression turned from surprise to resignation. "Fuck me. I need to think."

He ran a hand through his hair and stood up. His broad shoulders were tense as he went over to the window. Even agitated, his movements were graceful. They all had a way of moving that was graceful and purposeful at the same time. They reminded me of hunting jaguars—lean, muscular, graceful, patient—and they were probably just as dangerous to their prey. I swallowed hard. I was _pretty_ sure I was safe . . .

Killian spun around and jabbed a finger at me. "I warned you not to play with fire, didn't I? But you can't leave anything alone, can you? I specifically asked you to trust your instincts. You ignored them. Think about it! What do they tell you? What does your gut say about us?" His voice was soft but laced with steel.

Sean and Dec flanked me, not touching me, but close enough to feel their warmth. Their expressions were neutral, giving nothing away. Killian was running the show and neither one looked at me with support. They were all waiting for me to speak. It seemed important to them. What did they want me to say?

I drew a deep breath, and said with absolute conviction, "I trust you. But I'm also wary of you. Sorry, Sean, but you too." I started to reach for him, and he tensed. I dropped my hand to my side again. "I _am_ afraid of you—all of you—but only because I sense your power. I know how dangerous you are."

No response from them. Killian raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. I ground my teeth together. This wasn't going well. I tried again.

"Okay, my instincts tell me you're dangerous and powerful. You have a code you live by though. There are rules to your lives. I don't believe you would hurt innocent people, and you go out of your way to keep people from finding out about you." I paused for a minute, and added, "I believe you're here for something really important that I don't understand. My heart tells me you're good men, but I really don't know you, do I? I'm really sorry to complicate things for you. I won't share your secrets." My hand was itching to reach for Sean as I badly needed reassurance. I raised my chin and waited on Killian's judgment.

He stared intently during my little speech. I hadn't noticed anything strange, but he seemed to be reading my mind. His eyes were fathomless when I looked into them now. His thoughts were hidden from me. He seemed to come to a decision. He rolled his shoulders and did something completely unexpected.

He took my hands in his, and said simply, "Trust your instincts." Then he squeezed my hands a little too hard and smiled tightly. "We're more dangerous than you can imagine, but not to you."

When he dropped my hands, I felt a relief so strong my knees buckled. I really needed a hug. Before I could move, Dec picked me up in a bear hug and swung me around in a circle.

"Welcome to the family, Mica me girl!" He sat me on my feet in front of Sean and kissed my cheek. "It looks like we get to keep you after all."

"What am I? A stray puppy? Geez!"

Sean laughed, and quipped, "Oh, not a puppy, darlin'—just a stray human."

# Chapter 15: Angels and Demons

" _HUMAN_?"

They all laughed, but no one clarified the comment.

"Well?" I insisted.

Killian sighed. "I guess it's time for an official family meeting. You asked for the truth. I'll give it to you, but you should sit down. This might be a shock."

Another shock? Really? What else? With this question in the back of my mind, I sank to the couch. Sean sat next to me while Dec draped himself over a recliner. The furniture was comfortable but very simple like the rest of the decor. In fact, there were no decorations at all. No pictures or knickknacks sitting around and no fussy curtains or anything. It was obvious that three young men lived here. Where did they get the money to pay for all of this?

Killian dragged in a kitchen chair and settled into storytelling mode. He began at the beginning, I suppose. By the time we got to the middle of the story, where I came along, my head was ready to implode. I had to keep stopping him every few minutes to process what he was telling me.

"So let me get this straight. I understand you protect people. I get that. But who are you fighting all the time? What is the grey stuff from?"

"Demons," Sean answered.

My mouth dropped open. "No way. They exist?"

Dec snorted. "Of course, they do. Who do you think is behind all the evil things that happen around us? People sure, but they get motivation from demons."

"You'll need to run that by me again."

"Haven't you ever read the Bible? Surely you know about good and evil beings? People can be good or evil without any help, but sometimes demons get involved and encourage people into evil acts. They have agendas too. They want to cause as much chaos as they can by encouraging susceptible humans to do evil things. They love to plant the seeds and watch as people spiral out of control and kill each other. But even more importantly, the goal of all demons is to get mankind ready for the return of the antichrist. Our job is to discover where the demons are and destroy them. We try to limit the chaos to give humans a fighting chance." I must've looked alarmed, because he added, "Hey, we don't think the antichrist is coming soon—we haven't seen enough signs to worry about that yet. We're just taking care of ordinary demons for now."

"Oh, that makes me feel tons better! Okay, I need a minute." I closed my eyes and tried to absorb everything they'd told me so far. The words streamed through my head. Primani . . . protectors . . . demons . . . Primani . . . protectors . . . demons. They were warriors, weren't they? That explained the soldier-like attitudes, the commando clothes, and the guns. If they had other abilities, why did they use the guns? I asked Sean that question.

" _People_ use guns, Mica. Do I really need to go into what we do with our guns?"

"You shoot people, obviously! What do you do about the demons? How do you stop them?"

"We have other ways to destroy them. You haven't seen that, and I hope you don't have to." He pushed my hair behind my ear and looked away. His eyes were troubled.

Dec began telling me more about their missions, but I wasn't listening. Something else had my attention. _We have other ways to destroy them._ Demons came from Hell, right? What would their destruction be like? Did they bleed? I puzzled this concept through while Dec talked. I came to only one possible conclusion . . .

"Holy shit!" I squeaked before bolting to the bathroom. I barely made it to the toilet in time.

Sean came up behind me. "You okay? What's the matter?"

Okay? Definitely not! I was covered in cremated demon particles! That was so gross! I shot him the evil eye and threw up again, and one more time for good measure. I felt so _unclean!_ Swaying a bit, I wiped my mouth, and glared daggers at Sean. Unusually interested, Killian was lounging against the door frame, a half-formed smirk on his mouth.

I poked a finger into Sean's chest, and accused, "You were blowing up demons last night, weren't you?"

"Yeah, what about it?" He watched me like I might explode. His mouth twitched, but he bit down to keep from smiling.

"You hugged me! You covered me in demon guts! Oh, my _God_! That's disgusting!" My voice climbed at least four octaves.

Killian burst out laughing. The sound was so strange it made me freeze. He was cracking up. Dec came running in and asked what was so funny.

"Demon guts!" Killian managed to wheeze.

I glared at the three of them. Sean's mouth started to twitch, and then Dec chuckled. It was too much to take.

"Get out! All of you get out now! I need a shower. And Sean, we're not done with this conversation." I slammed the door behind them and locked it. I scrubbed my body until my skin was bright red and hurting. I ran out of hot water and stood in the cold for five minutes longer. By the time I got out, I was squeaky clean and ready to find humor in it.

When I finally reappeared in the living room, the guys wore serious faces. Not one of them laughed. I caught the twinkle in their eyes though.

"You never asked me what I called you about, Sean. Probably I should tell you about the visit I had."

I told them every detail I could remember about the big guy's message at the party. Sean had me repeat it one more time. He swore when I passed on the part about me getting killed. He draped an arm around me protectively and mumbled something in that language I didn't understand. Killian rolled his eyes, but Dec smiled in understanding.

"What did you say?"

He actually blushed but answered me. "I said I would protect you with my life."

"Oh." For once, I was speechless.

Killian wasn't as speechless. He was muttering angrily and got up to pace by the window again.

"Mica, think hard about something for me. You said he grabbed your arm, right? Did you notice anything unusual about his touch? Did you sense anything odd?"

"Odd? I don't know what you mean. Could you be more specific?"

"Seriously, this could be very important. Did you get anything from him at all?" He tapped his temple to make the point.

I racked my brain for any impressions but didn't find anything.

"Sorry, but nothing stands out to me. He was a stranger; that much I noticed. He and his creepy friend weren't from around here."

"Okay. That's good. I'm almost sure he was human then. Your intuition is pretty strong so I think you would have sensed a demon if one touched you."

I hadn't thought about that possibility. Ewww, gross! I rubbed my arms where the stranger held me. Maybe I should take another shower? I looked towards the hallway, but Dec interrupted me.

"No way! I need a shower. You've used up all the hot water twice already. You're clean enough." I narrowed my eyes, so he added, "No, I'm not reading your mind. You're just really obvious."

"Oh, awesome. Guess I need to work on that then?"

Killian interrupted our bickering. "All right, let's focus. We need to walk through this and get a plan together. Mica, you can stay if you want. Try to keep your mouth shut though."

"Bully," I huffed under my breath. No need to piss him off just yet. I was finally beginning to understand what the heck was going on with these guys. I've made it to the inner circle. Don't want to get booted out so soon. I had a feeling that my life was about to get interesting.

For the next hour or so, they talked about the message, the messenger, solutions, and protection details. They were really worried about me and my family. I must have been naïve because I just assumed they would fix everything and nothing bad would happen. I said as much and all three of them bombarded me with comments.

Sean said, "Nothing will happen to you or your family. We'll protect you. This is what we do."

Dec blew me a kiss. "Seriously? You think so much of us? I'm flattered. Thanks, darlin'."

Killian was, as usual, brutally honest, and a big downer. "Well, you're partially right. We'll run this down and neutralize the threat; however, it might take a while, and in the meantime, you're not safe."

"What does that mean?"

Sean reached over to squeeze my hand. "Don't worry. We'll figure this out. We _do_ have some advantages over the bad guys, you know." He brushed his lips against my temple and got back to planning.

Watching them work was fascinating. It was like being dropped into the middle of an episode of _Supernatural_ without the piles of ancient tomes littering the tables and salt all over the place. Dec made magic with a laptop while Killian spread maps across the dining room table. Sean talked about known enemies and tactics. Well, not quite like _Supernatural_ —Primani were definitely a military-style ops unit. I couldn't help grinning over the terms that popped up in the conversation—comms, gear, objective, upper-level demons, and go-time. Shaking my head in amazement, I bit my lip. Well, I'd wanted the truth. This wasn't even close to my imagination though. I guess truth really is stranger than fiction.

At the end of the afternoon, they had a plan. Killian and Dec would report to their boss to get approval for it. They'd be gone a day or two. Sean would stay here to watch over me in case the mysterious demons decided to kill me off. When they got their new orders, they would go take care of the problem. They were stronger when they were together. Depending on how things went, they would try to rotate protection. In the meantime, they would teach me how to recognize and avoid demons.

"Okay, so what about ordinary bad guys? Maybe they'll send a person to grab me. I don't even have a real gun!"

Sean considered my question, and said, "I can take care of that. Are you afraid of guns?"

"Are you kidding me? No way. I'm dying to take out some bad guys." I pointed my finger like a gun and shot the wall.

He looked at me like I had lost my mind. "Okaaay. I'll get you a gun, but you have to keep it hidden. You're not old enough to have a gun, and I don't want you going to jail. So no waving it around at random assholes. Got it?"

"I think I'm insulted. You don't really think I'm that stupid, do you?"

He actually rolled his eyes. "Not stupid. Just impulsive. Will you behave if I get you a gun?"

"Yes, sir. I'll be a model soldier." I stopped grinning, and added, "Don't worry. Seriously. I'll keep it hidden and do exactly what you tell me. Believe me. Going to jail isn't on my to-do list."

Standing to stretch with a huge yawn, Sean pulled me upright and gathered me into his arms. "We're done for now. Let's go to my room. I want to feel you against me."

He didn't need to ask me twice.

As the bedroom door clicked behind me, he tugged me to the bed, falling backwards and holding me against his chest. Instead of kissing me, he searched my eyes, his expression intense. All playfulness was gone. Serious Sean was back. I felt suddenly shy and lowered my lashes.

He brushed a fingertip across my mouth, tipped up my chin, and said, "Don't look away. Your eyes are beautiful, and so are you."

He feathered kisses across my eyelids, the tip of my nose, then each corner of my mouth. I melted into a puddle . . . The anticipation was killing me. I parted my lips, breath coming quickly, but he barely brushed them with his tongue on his way to my throat.

After nuzzling my neck, he curled the tip of his clever tongue around the shell of my ear all while he bared his heart. "I'm amazed by you. Love isn't something we expect. We're sworn to protect people, and love makes that hard. We stay above it. But you . . . you are something else entirely. You showed up and turned my world upside down. I don't know what to do with you, but I know I can't be apart from you for long. I can't breathe right. The rhythm is off somehow. You're a part of me now, and I don't want to live without you. If I lost you, it would be like losing my heart. I wouldn't survive it."

"You'll never lose me. I promise." Taking his hand, I kissed the palm and lay it against my cheek. Closing my eyes, I breathed in the woodsy scent that clung to him always. My heart nearly exploded with joy as his confession lingered in my ears. I understood how he felt. It was the same for me. I had no more words to say. He'd said everything I felt, everything I believed. It had taken us time to get to the point, and there wasn't anything left to talk about. Stroking his palm over my jaw, I pressed tiny kisses along the strong tendons on the inside of his wrist before guiding it to my heart. His fingers automatically curled over my breast; he devoured me with sleepy, sexy eyes and smiled slow and easy.

It was time. I leaned forward just enough to push my breast into his hand and eased closer until our bodies were touching from head to toe. "Make love to me, Sean. There's no reason to wait. I know your secrets. I'm not running away."

His hand stilled and he searched my face before asking, "Are you sure?"

I reached between us and stroked the bulge straining against his zipper. "As sure as you are." His breath caught and I purred, "I want you." I gave him a squeeze. "I want this."

The change was subtle but his expression lightened ever so slightly and he angled away with a cocky wave at his crotch. "It's all yours, love." With that, he wrapped his hand around the back of my neck, drawing me closer, fitting his mouth over mine.

I sank into him as he played with my lips and tongue. His fingers moved over my face, feathering touches over my skin as though he were memorizing every inch. His mouth trailed to my throat, his fingers guiding my head back for better access. Fireworks sparkled in my head as he sucked the tender flesh beneath my ear. His arm banded around my waist, holding me still while he explored my throat and trailed wet kisses between my breasts. Stopping only to pull my shirt over my head, he dipped his tongue beneath the silk of my bra, teasing my nipples until they pebbled like cherries. Lowering me to my back, he slowly tugged my bra straps over my shoulder, eyes gleaming with passion, before trailing his mouth over the path of the straps. When my breasts were bare, he caught one of my nipples in his mouth, sucking until I cried out and arched my back completely off of the bed.

"You're so beautiful. I could look at you forever." He gazed at me until I squirmed with frustration. Then he licked his lower lip and murmured, "You're so wet for me. I can't wait to taste you." His hand spanned my belly, curving over the taut skin, slipping into my pants and tugging them off in one smooth motion.

The sudden coolness was welcome against my overheated skin. As he flung his jeans into the corner, I lay back with arms beneath my head. Good God. He was incredible. Every muscle gleamed in the dim light. His eyes burned with passion; his pulse throbbed in his throat. His cock stood straight and rock hard. I swallowed a sudden pool of saliva at the sight. Apparently, it all went south because I felt my core go completely liquid.

Kneeling beside me, he guided my fingers between my legs, sliding them over the slick folds, dipping them inside. "Do you feel that? Hot and wet for me." He licked the tips of my fingers and smiled. "Mmm. Sweet."

Grinning playfully, I tugged him over me and pulled his mouth to mine. He straddled my hips and lay across me as we kissed. My hands drifted over his back to cup his butt, just before he used his knee to spread my thighs. I tensed as the head of his cock teased my entrance. How is that going to fit?

Sensing my nervousness, he pressed his mouth to my ear and whispered, "Relax, love. I'll be as gentle as I can. It'll only hurt for a second." As he spoke the words, his clever fingers worked over my clit sending waves of pleasure coiling in my belly. My hips arched into his hand in a rhythm that set my blood on fire. In the next second, he shifted slightly and plunged into me with one thrust.

Catching my cry with his mouth, he stilled inside, kissing me gently until the twinge of pain disappeared. As my body adjusted, he cuddled me to his chest, murmuring, "Okay?"

I shifted my pelvis experimentally, expecting it to hurt, but there wasn't any real pain. Instead there was only the feeling of fullness that women would sell their souls for.

"Well, I'm glad that's over with. Can we get to the mind-blowing orgasm part of sex now?"

He burst out laughing and kissed me quick and hard. "I'll see what I can do."

I smiled into his eyes as he gathered me close and his hips began to move. As he pulled out and thrust deeper, I dug my nails into his shoulders. Oh, so good. "No pressure."

"Piece of cake."

# Chapter 16: A Merry Christmas

"WHAT DO YOU DO FOR CHRISTMAS?" I asked Killian.

We were waiting for Dec to show up with another box of shells. Killian was helping me learn to shoot my new gun. Killian and Sean had argued for hours over the right gun for me. Eventually Killian won the argument, and I got a bad ass new Sig Sauer P229. I hefted it in my hand and smiled like an idiot. I had a real gun! Unfortunately, I couldn't seem to hit anything with it. After two boxes of shells, I wasn't qualified yet. Killian shook his head a lot but didn't criticize. In my opinion, I was hitting things pretty well. Patiently, he kept pointing out that I was supposed to be hitting _specific_ things, on purpose . . . not just anything that sat in the general direction I pointed the gun. Apparently, those hits didn't count. So Dec went to get another box of shells. I think he's just trying to torture me. It's freezing out here. I rubbed my hands together to keep my fingers from getting stiff. _They_ didn't seem to have that problem. Killian wore a sweatshirt but no gloves or hat. Whatever their biology, they didn't seem to get cold . . . must be that extra energy they carried around. I rubbed my dripping nose on my coat sleeve and waited for an answer.

He wrinkled his nose, and replied, "Christmas? Are we really going to have this conversation?" His lips thinned in annoyance. I was a thorn in his side.

"What? You don't celebrate? At all? Isn't it like, your boss' birthday?"

He choked on a laugh. "My _boss_? That's rich. Is Jesus _your_ boss? Is that why you celebrate Christmas?"

"Well, no. But . . . you guys . . . are . . . but, but, He's Jesus!"

He threw back his head and laughed long and hard before finally settling back to his more dignified self. "Mica, the celebration of Christmas is a religious tradition for _people_. It's part of a lot of different religions. We respect that—totally. But we're not like people. We don't observe any religious traditions or even human social traditions unless we have to for cover."

"So you don't ever put up a tree or anything?"

"No. It's just another day for us." His lips were still twitching with the urge to laugh, but he smothered them with the back of his hand.

I was about to say something else when Dec jogged over with the box of shells. Killian looked relieved. Casual conversation wasn't his thing.

"All right, let's try this again. Mica, use the sight to line up your target. I think you're just pointing the gun but aren't using the sight. Use it. That's why it's there."

_Okay, but what you don't seem to understand is I AM using the sight_ . . . aloud, I simply said, "Yes, drill sergeant!"

An hour later, Killian and I were back in the farmhouse defrosting. Dec took off to get some food. I was a block of frozen girl parts. I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to move my toes again . . . I took off my boots and socks and cringed as the heat from the fireplace hit my frozen toes. God, this hurts! I leaned back in my chair and grimaced while things defrosted.

"What's the matter with you?"

I cracked an eye, and whined, "My toes are frozen. Unlike you, oh glorious leader, I don't have a built-in heat lamp. My parts freeze if left in the snow too long." On cue, another toe-curling slash of pain rolled through my foot, and I groaned while trying to arch away from my foot.

Crouching, he examined my poor white toes. For such a big man, he was surprisingly gentle. When he was done, he rested his hand on my ankle while he favored me with a sheepish smile. Was he actually chagrined? Huh. This was new. Did he have some human qualities, after all? He mumbled something under his breath and wrapped his big hands around one of my feet. As usual, his hand was unnaturally warm.

I yanked my foot away with a cry. "Ouch! Too hot, too hot! You're making it worse!" I cradled my foot while breathing hard over the throbbing pain.

He snapped, "Oh, fine. Just hold still and I'll fix it." He wrapped his hand around my foot again. His hands were cooler this time. It was a nice try but didn't make much of a difference. I was still gritting my teeth as the blood defrosted and flowed again. It ached all the way up my leg.

"Still hurts?" he asked with a puzzled frown.

Stifling another whiny reply, I nodded miserably.

His face lit with an idea. He dragged over a footstool and sat across from me with my feet in his lap so he could hold them both at the same time. He closed his eyes and concentrated. I was fascinated by the crease between his eyes. In spite of his generally prickly disposition, he really was a good-looking man. I guess his holier-than-thou attitude was partially earned . . . And he had beautiful strong hands, too. After a few seconds, his fingertips lightened to a faint gold. The shimmering illumination flowed slowly from his fingers and over my toes and feet. The change was barely noticeable, but I recognized it. In a minute, both of my feet were surrounded. He was concentrating completely on what he was doing. A bead of sweat trickled down one side of his face. This was a side of him I'd never seen before. I had no idea how much effort this took. I had a whole new appreciation for Sean now . . .

His plan was definitely working, and my feet were feeling almost normal again. With a moan of pleasure, I settled more deeply into the chair and rested my eyes while Killian worked his magic.

A shocked voice interrupted us. "Killian! What is the meaning of this?"

Killian jumped like he'd been scalded. His face flushed red, and he rushed over to greet our visitor. He was very tall and powerfully built with blond hair that rested on his shoulders. He wasn't handsome. He looked like he was carved from stone. He had arresting features—strong cheekbones, a long straight nose, and vivid blue eyes. He carried himself like a general or maybe a king . . . hard to tell, and I wasn't going to ask. I automatically tried to stand to greet him too. My feet weren't working quite right after being abruptly yanked away from Killian. I had pins and needles and wobbled unsteadily when I stood up. I grabbed the chair for balance just as Dec appeared in the doorway with three bags of food.

The stranger demanded, "Who is this girl?"

Killian flushed a darker shade of red but answered quickly, "Sir, this is Mica Thomas. We've been helping her with some problems."

"Who's responsible for her? You, Killian? Or you, Declan?"

Dec stood ramrod straight and replied, "No, sir. Mica is Sean's charge. He's away for a few days so we were showing her some ways to protect herself."

"Surely that's not necessary? What kind of threat are you preparing for?" His imperious gaze landed on the footstool.

The butt-chewing went on for hours. I was not invited to attend. Thank God! I don't know who that guy is, but he's someone important. Dec almost had a stroke when he saw him in the living room. I'm pretty sure he would have disappeared immediately except that the new guy spotted him. I didn't want to miss the juicy details so I was hanging around in Sean's room. But geez, they'd been at it for three hours already, and I was getting bored and hungry. The delicious food went with Dec into the meeting, and I'm pretty sure no one was eating it. What a waste. My stomach howled in frustrated demand. I was about to get up to leave when Dec slipped into the room like a ninja.

"Spill it, Dec! What's going on?"

"Shh! Not right now! Keep your voice down. Grab your things, and let's get out of here. Hurry up!"

Now what? I jammed my feet into my boots. He was listening at the door while I grabbed my stuff. Are we running away? He grinned like a naughty little boy.

"Dec—" I started to complain.

"Hush! Do you _want_ to get caught? Let's bolt."

We were tiptoeing through the back door when disaster struck. My phone rang. And kept ringing because I couldn't find it in my purse . . . Dec looked like he wanted to strangle me. Oh, please go to voicemail and shut up! I was digging for the phone while Dec towed me behind him. We rounded the porch to the driveway and stopped dead. Correction— _he_ stopped dead— _I_ ran into him and _then_ stopped dead. The still-ringing phone landed in the snow.

"Where do you think you're going?"

Uh-oh. Killian did _not_ look happy. He was directly in front of me, so close his chest was touching mine, and he was furious. I craned my neck to see his face, and yep, he was uber angry. His eyes were backlit with blue flame. If that wasn't a big enough clue, the wave of heat coming off of him synched it for me. He was trying very hard not to kill me right then.

I took a step or three back and appealed to Dec for clarification. "I'm confused. What did I do?"

Killian dropped any pretense of humanity as his voice lowered an octave to an incredulous snarl that struck like a whip. " _You_? You just about got me _fired_! Do you know who that was? Your weakness nearly got me shipped to the other side of the world!"

I was stunned. I didn't know what to say to any of that. He still had plenty to say, though. Before he could call me any seriously ugly names, Dec stepped between us. "Leave her alone, dude. This isn't her fault."

He clapped onto Killian's shoulder to shove him back, and Killian threw him across the porch with one hand. My mouth fell open. Roaring with fury, Dec charged him from the side. They collided and flew off the steps to the yard. Killian landed in a pile of snow which promptly melted around him in a hiss of steam. Whoa! Dec rocketed to his feet to go at it again. Curses flew as fast as fists and feet. A spray of blood hit me in the face.

"Stop it! Both of you! What is the matter with you?"

They froze, bloodied fists raised in mid-punch. Dec had a cut under his eye that was bleeding all over his shirt, while Killian had a busted lip. Growling more insults, they exchanged threatening glances but stopped beating the hell out of each other. Idiots!

"Killian, I am _so_ sorry you got in trouble because of me! You know, you _have_ to know, I wouldn't want that. I'd never do anything to get you in trouble! You can't blame me for this . . . bad timing today. I know you got chewed out, but you're still the boss here, right? If not, I'd think you'd be gone already, right?" I walked up to him and stood on my tiptoes to try to look him in the eye. "If it will make you feel better, I'll leave and not come back. I'll stay out of your way from now on. Is that what you need to hear?"

He stared at me for a minute without saying a word. His unblinking eyes scared me more than his anger. Finally, he whirled around and kicked a pile of snow. It disintegrated in a puff. He growled, "I really need to kill something right now. Dec, let's go kill some demons."

Dec tugged his shirt over his head to mop at his face. Peering over the bloody material, he asked, "Can I eat first?"

It was finally Christmas Eve. Mother Nature was into the Christmas spirit and had dumped a foot of snow all over the area. The sky was clear now, and a bazillion stars were sparkling above. I was standing in the driveway marveling at them and looking for one that was shooting around so I could wish on it. The snow came up to Domino's belly, but she didn't mind. She was bounding through the yard like a deer. Now she was rolling around in it. She was one weird dog. Is she making _snow angels_? I shook my head. That dog has lost her mind—no dignity at all. She stopped rolling around and gave me a dirty look. _Oh, lighten up! It's Christmas!_

The whole yard was a Christmas card. Dad and Janet decorated the house with lights and a tree. It was very festive and bright. Janet's touch, I'm sure. Dad just did what he was told. It was very nice. I sighed a little wistfully though. My mom and I used to decorate our tree together every year. I missed that fat old plastic tree. I missed her too. It's hard to believe it's been almost two years since she died. I still missed her a lot, but the pain was mostly gone now. I've learned to accept it and move on with my life. So many bizarre things have happened that I can't remember having a typical life anymore. I don't have the luxury of wallowing in the past or dreaming of the future. I have to focus on today. Finally! A star streamed overhead, and I quickly said my wish before it disappeared. I crossed my fingers for added support and went inside to eat Christmas Eve dinner.

Around 2 a.m., I woke abruptly from a dream. I sat up, blinking to clear my vision. The dream's fuzzy edges were still teasing me. What was I dreaming about? I couldn't remember anything but a blinding white light and a lingering feeling of doom. Strange . . . usually I remember my dreams. I couldn't get the images back this time. I rolled over and spooned with the dog, pondering. As I drifted back into oblivion, something teased at my mind. Something I needed to remember . . .

Christmas day dawned bright and blue-skied. It was also freezing cold and windy. The wind howled through the trees; my cue to snuggle deeper into my blanket. It was too early to get up anyway. The clock said it was only 7:00. I groaned. Why, exactly, am I awake at this ungodly hour? I started to roll over again when I saw him in the doorway.

"Sean!" I practically tackled him to the floor. "When did you get back?"

He wrapped an arm around me, drawing me close to nuzzle my neck. "Just now, darlin'. Mmm, you smell good. Merry Christmas. I haven't been to the farmhouse yet, so I can't stay long. Killian is waiting for news." He held me at arms' length and broke into a huge grin. "Well, you're a sight for sore eyes!"

"Hang on, I'll be right back." I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and cringed when I looked in the mirror. Oh my God! Who was this monster? My hair was doing its best to imitate a hedgehog, while my mascara was smeared under my eyes like a raccoon. Shit. I looked like Marilyn Manson. I thumped myself in the forehead. Ugh! Why, why, why do these things happen to me?

I reappeared with a shiny pink face, and my hair in a ponytail. I curtseyed for effect. "Better?"

He flashed that sexy smile of his, and said, "You know I've seen you looking much, much worse. You're fine. Now come here and talk to me." He patted the bed. Domino jumped up to curl up against him.

Since the dog stole my spot, I sat cross-legged across from him to drink him in. He needed a haircut. His hair was starting to curl up on his neck and around his ears. It made him look younger and somehow innocent. The shadow on his jaw was a few days old, and his eyes looked tired. They were still that vivid ocean blue, but they looked more shuttered than before. He didn't hold my gaze very long and looked away. As before, he had a long scratch down one side of his neck and a blue bruise on one cheekbone. He's been fighting again. Who this time? He seemed happy enough so it must have gone well. He wasn't covered in ash so it must've been humans. Well, that seemed safer than fighting demons. I'm not sure what's more bizarre to me—the fact that my boyfriend kills demons—or the fact that I just accept it as part of his day.

"I don't have much time, but I want to share my news with you. I went to visit my mentor to sort some of this out. I told him about you—"

I interrupted. "Me? Did you tell him about us?"

"Very little. Only as much as I needed to. I'm pretty sure he already knows how I feel about you. There are very few secrets among us." He grimaced at the idea of our business being on the street.

"Sorry, go on. I'll be quiet."

"He thinks you have a role to play in what we do, but you are not ready for what's coming." He held up a hand. "Yes, you've been doing some training, but you don't know what you're up against. Humans are one thing; demons are another. There's a zero percent chance you could survive against a demon." He smiled wickedly, and added, "And after hearing how bad your aim is, I don't know if you'd survive against a human."

"Hey! That's not fair! I hit targets! It was freezing, and my hands were numb. I know I'll be better when it's warmer."

He yawned with a groan, and said, "Maybe so, but we can't control the temperature so you have to be able to aim in the cold. This is New York, you know. It's cold here a lot."

We talked for another hour or so before he stood up and stretched. He looked pale and more tired. We decided I needed some more training with the gun and a few other things. He still didn't give me any details about their mission other than it involved demons, weapons, and possibly terrorists. Their mentors thought there were other players involved that were confusing the typical battle lines between Primani and demons. The Primani were still getting snatches of intel and didn't have a clear picture yet. They were getting worried, though and stepping up efforts to track down informants across the east coast. There were more Primani in the area than before, but Sean didn't know where they were working. He was given orders to hang tight here, keep eyes open, and be ready to move out with no notice. Oh, and keep babysitting me since no one knew what I was capable of yet. He was going to have to help me develop my abilities.

No wonder he was tired.

"Will you stay here and have Christmas morning with my family? I know it's not your thing, but you just got back, and I'm not ready to let you go yet. Please stay."

He started to shake his head and stopped. He yawned again, and said, "Okay, but I need a power nap first."

An hour later, I struggled not to laugh as I watched his version of the _power_ _nap_. He was lying on my bed looking like any normal person does when they sleep, with a small, but notable, exception—his body was outlined in his _saol_. It gave a whole new meaning to the power nap.

After Sean recharged his batteries, so to speak, we went to the main house for breakfast and presents. Dad was not especially happy to see us together so early in the morning.

Sean, as usual, had a great cover story. "My family's from Ireland, and I was really interested in seeing how Americans celebrate Christmas. I hope you don't mind, I sort of invited myself." He finished with a totally disarming smile that had Janet flustered and running to the kitchen for fresh coffee.

Dad was less flustered but grunted his acceptance. We spent an hour passing out gifts and oohing and ahhing over all the things we got. The kids were happily comparing loot and arguing over who got to use the new computer first. Trevor was bouncing up and down with his latest video game and wanted us to leave the living room so he could turn on the Xbox. He was being obnoxious and a little embarrassing. Janet and I were getting breakfast ready when I noticed my dad pull Sean to the side. Uh-oh, what's this about? I tried to read my dad's lips, but he was talking too fast. He looked serious, but not particularly angry. Still . . .

"Don't worry, hon. Your dad's not chasing him away. He only wants to be sure you're safe. You know this was a hard year. He worries about you." Janet shrugged. "Besides, your boyfriend isn't exactly helpless."

"Should I rescue him?"

She gestured between the two men. "Sean or your father?"

I saw her point. Dad might be all fatherly and stern, but Sean still looked like a mercenary even when he tried to seem harmless. I tried to see him from a father's perspective. Um, yeah. The way he carried himself, plus the hard body and watchful eyes, would raise alarm bells in most people. Not to mention he was bruised, unshaven, and towered over my dad's modest height. No wonder my father was twitchy. Sean seemed to be tolerating the attitude though. His expression was respectful, and he nodded occasionally. What are they talking about? I marched over to save the day.

"Okay, Dad, that's enough of the third degree. Sean's harmless!" I winked at my patient boyfriend.

Sean squeezed my fingers a little too hard. Maybe not so patient after all. He pulled my hand up and kissed it softly.

" _Harmless_ , that's right." He smiled at my dad to reinforce the words.

Sean whispered in my ear, "I have to get back to the farmhouse. I can hear Killian yelling from here." He tapped his ear for emphasis.

"I'm coming with you. Give me a minute."

He waited impatiently by the door while I ran around giving everyone last minute Christmas hugs. My official story was I was spending the afternoon with his family. That was sort of true—the guys _were_ family after all—we wouldn't be celebrating Christmas though.

We were both quiet on the ride over to the farmhouse. I was thinking, and I don't know what he was doing. He faced the road but seemed to be seeing much farther away. He was distracted by something. I didn't want to add to it so I kept to my own thoughts. We pulled up to the house and parked. Someone had thoughtfully cleared snow off the sidewalk so I didn't have to wade through it. The sidewalk was a weird color though . . . it was . . . _blue_. Huh? Without thinking, I stepped onto it, promptly falling hard on my butt, cracking my head, and then sliding several feet before stopping. I lay flat on my back, staring up at the indigo sky, watching pretty little sparkles float around my head. _Why do these things always happen to me?_

Sean hauled me to my feet. I swayed dizzily, but cried, "What did you do to that sidewalk? It's solid ice!"

Killian appeared in the doorway, looking chagrined. "It's my fault. I cleared the snow this morning."

"Snow shovels don't leave two inches of ice behind. What did you use, a flamethrower?" I joked.

He studied his feet and hesitated. "Something like that . . . I was in a hurry!"

Sean burst out laughing. "Dumb ass."

Killian flushed. "Shut it, little brother! You weren't here. I had to improvise."

Sean doubled over with laughter, finally gasping between chuckles, "Whatever. Come on, love."

After towing me across the ice to the porch, he stopped by the front door and waited.

"What are we waiting for? Let's go in. It's freezing out here!"

"Patience, sweetheart, Dec's not ready for you yet." He turned me around to face the yard and wrapped his arms around me. I leaned against him and warmed up. After a minute or two, the front door flew open, and Dec beamed at me. What were they up to?

He was vibrating with so much excitement that he was practically glowing. He nudged Sean aside and put his hands over my eyes. "Close your eyes!"

He spun me around until I was dizzy and laughing before he finally pulled his hands away with a flourish. "Ta da!"

I blinked. I blinked again and tears filled my eyes. "Oh, wow."

Standing in front of me was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. A tree decorated with gossamer threads of gold, glittering with thousands of crystals, lit by pure _saol._ Waves of gentle heat floated from it, the very air hummed with energy. They made this with their own _saols_. For me. I swallowed the lump in my throat. In awe, I ventured closer and was immediately surrounded with an overwhelming feeling of peace. I reached out to touch the crystals, but my hand was shaking so hard I was afraid I would knock the tree over. Sean guided my hand to the tree. I brushed one finger over the brilliant crystals. My fingertip started to seep blood but didn't hurt.

"Sean? What is this?"

Eyes shining with love, he caught my mouth in a long, lingering kiss, and said, "You'll be okay, love. Go on now, find your present." He nodded toward the tree again.

Nestled in between two branches was a small heart-shaped ornament. I started to reach for it, but Sean stopped me.

He picked up my bleeding hand, and said, "No, this one."

I reached for the ornament, and it moved in my hand as I pulled it out of its hiding place. It wasn't an ornament at all. It was a locket on a braided gold chain. I sucked in my breath. It was too beautiful to be for me. I blinked back tears again. When I looked up, Killian had joined us. The three of them surrounded me, their faces shining with hope. Then I understood. The heart wasn't just moving; it was _beating_. I held it against my cheek to feel the rhythm of it.

Dec broke the spell. "Open it up. It won't hurt you."

It had two overlapping circles carved into each half of the locket. Three of the circles were filled with shiny golden drops. The fourth circle was empty. I gazed up at the faces I loved and everything was suddenly crystal clear. I touched the tip of my finger to the locket and watched in amazement as the tiny drop of blood filled the circle and turned to gold.

# Chapter 17: Snowflakes and Bloodstains

"SEAN? EARTH TO SEAN?" I nudged my distracted boyfriend with my elbow. He blinked. "What's up with you today?"

"I'm sorry, Mica. I'm beat."

Hmm. He was tired today, but that didn't explain his distraction yesterday or last week. He's been distracted a lot lately. What's going on with him? He's always got a secret, but this seems different. He's subdued, edgy. More serious than he usually is.

"Talk to me, please. I can tell something's going on." I was surprised to find his eyes unguarded. As before, I could see every strand of color in the iris and the gold flecks stood out in bold relief. He caught my intention and kissed my nose.

"That's enough of that. I'm not in the mood to watch you puke," he said as he drew me onto his lap. He wrapped his arms around me so I wouldn't fall but then zoned out again.

Sighing heavily, I put my cheek against his shoulder and watched the snow fall. It was Sunday, and we were hanging out at his place. We were alone for now, and the house was completely quiet. The snow was coming down hard and the wind was whistling through the pine trees around the house. The roaring fire in the fireplace paled in comparison to my Christmas tree. The beautiful tree was still standing even though it had been three weeks since Christmas day. I couldn't imagine taking it down and putting it into a box. Surely the box would catch on fire? How did you put a magical tree out? Why would you want to? I didn't.

Sean was asleep. I snuggled against him and closed my eyes too. I was dozing off pretty well when Sean started mumbling. The words were indistinct, but the urgency wasn't. Was he afraid? I strained to catch another word, but he was quiet again. I gently extricated myself and peered into his face. His eyes were moving under the lids, his breathing shallow. He twisted beneath me and flung an arm out to one side.

I patted his shoulder. "Sean, wake up. You're dreaming."

"Mica? Mica? Where are you?"

I tried to shake him by the shoulder again. One big hand caught mine in a death grip. He groaned like a wounded animal, and said clearly, "No! Mica!" and then he went limp. The dream was gone, but his tortured expression remained. Sleep was history for me now so I reached out and stroked his cheek. _Come on, wake up._

"Did you finally kill him?"

I jumped, and loudly shushed Killian who was lounging in the doorway. I didn't hear him come in. Did he even use doors?

"How long have you been standing there? I didn't hear you come in."

"No, you didn't. And you never will unless I want you to." He gave me a smirk and peeled away from the doorframe. "To answer your question though, about twenty seconds." Gesturing towards Sean with his chin, he asked, "Nightmare?"

"How did you know?"

"He's been having them for a few weeks. I've heard him through the walls." At my alarmed look, he added, "No, he's not that loud. We all have really good hearing. I can hear beads of sweat running down the back of someone I'm about to eliminate." He smiled, showing his canines.

Normally I would have laughed, but this wasn't funny. I'm supposed to be the one with the crazy dreams. That's _my_ job. He's the not-quite-human one of us so I assumed he didn't dream. Huh. Guess I was wrong. The object of my distress suddenly sat up straight and blinked.

Killian said, "Good, you're awake. You might as well tell us about the dreams now or Mica will nag you about it until you do. Easier to get it over with." With this statement, he pulled up a chair and sat.

Sean scowled in confusion and grumbled, "Dreams? What are you talking about?"

Was he serious? "You've been having bad dreams, haven't you?"

"No, that's your job. I don't dream."

Killian narrowed his eyes a bit and sat back, fingers tented under his chin.

"Are you sure? You were muttering my name over and over again and not in a sexy way."

He pushed himself to his feet and practically yelled, "For the last time, I'm not dreaming. Leave it alone. Both of you."

I was more worried than before and unconsciously fondled my locket. This was not over.

The next day was clear and sunny so we decided to go to Vermont for snowboarding. Maybe this would put Sean in a better mood. Fingers crossed for that small miracle. We took the ferry across the lake and ended up at Stowe. Mt. Mansfield is only 4,300 feet high but is rumored to have some nice trails. The mountain was totally blanketed in new snow with forests of bare grey trees reaching towards the sky. Here and there, an optimistic pine tree raised its face towards the sun. It was starkly gorgeous, and I couldn't wait to jump on my board. I was in the mood for speed today . . . Sean better keep up or I would leave him behind. I was clipping my lift ticket to my jacket when Sean came up with our boards. He scanned the area while I checked my board straps.

"Are you worried about something? You've been on high alert since we crossed into Vermont. What's up?"

He shook his head slightly, and said, "I'm sensing something . . . but I can't place it. Just a feeling . . . I can't explain it." He shrugged. "Let's go before we lose the daylight."

Three hours later, I was catching my breath at the top of Bypass, one of the double diamond trails we were hitting today. The sun was getting low in the sky. This would be our last run of the day. Sean sat on the ground, adjusting his straps. I plopped down beside him. The view from up here was amazing. I could see for miles in every direction. There's something about being out in the middle of the mountains . . . it's humbling. This place could turn hostile in five minutes and eat us alive. We're just little specks against the endless snow.

"You're happy," he observed with a cheeky grin. His black and silver Oakleys were propped on top of his head while he adjusted his straps one last time. Dressed in black board pants and an unzipped black and red fleece, he was ridiculously gorgeous sitting so comfortably in the snow. His flushed cheeks and glimmering sexy eyes only added to his hotness. A natural athlete, he moved with confidence that I envied.

A couple of snow bunnies slowed down to gawk at him. He politely inclined his head in their direction, and they erupted into giggles before speeding down the trail. I must've growled out loud because he snickered under his breath. "Don't tell me you're jealous."

Breathing in the crisp air, I grinned. "Well . . ."

With a short bark of laughter, he tossed a handful of powder at me. "Come over here, you little witch!"

I scooted my butt a tad closer. Without seeming to move, he lunged, dragging me down on top of him. Kissing me dizzy in the snow, he finally rolled me to one side when someone whistled on their way down the mountain.

Pink with pleasure, I nibbled on his lower lip, and purred, "You're crazy, but I like it."

Kissing me thoroughly one last time, he helped me to my feet. "Come on, darlin'. We're going to do this in the dark if we don't get moving."

Well, damn. My legs were like jelly after all that kissing. Did he think I could just stand up? I wobbled for a second or two. After his comment about darkness, I studied the sky to gauge the sun. The purple-grey clouds rolling in from the north promised more snow. They also promised slow driving home. I pointed to the clouds. He glanced at them without concern and jumped in front of me on the trail. In a flash, he was gone over the drop.

The trees blurred as I flew down the steep trail. It took all of my concentration to stay upright. I didn't dare get distracted or I'd end up over the edge of a very steep ravine. We were mostly alone up here, so the race was on. I leaned to the right to pass him, and he blocked me. I swooped around his left side, and he blocked me again. He rode with amazing grace and skill. I was impressed. His body moved as one with his board, and he had wicked quick reflexes. It would have been entertaining to watch if he wasn't beating me down the mountain! As it was, by the time we reached Lower Nosedive, the last trail leading into the lodge area, I was still behind him when he stopped smoothly in front of me. I stopped too, but not as gracefully. As my board dug to a stop, I promptly fell on my butt and lay breathless and laughing in the snow. He plopped down next to me to catch his breath. Smiling, I held my lips up for a cold kiss.

"You are _amazing_! I don't even feel bad that you totally kicked my ass today. It's actually sort of sexy." I stole another kiss as I ran my fingers through the fine spikiness of his hair.

"You're not so bad yourself. You need to work on sticking your landing though!" He patted my butt for emphasis.

Snow started falling as we were putting the boards in the trunk, and the sun was nearly gone. I wasn't worried about driving home in the dark but wanted to get off the mountain roads before they got bad. Sean was frowning again and staring towards the west. The wind was picking up, swirling the snow around us. It was a little creepy.

"What's out there?"

"I don't know, and it's bugging me. There's something here . . ." His voice trailed off, eyes growing distant. After a minute, he snapped to attention. "Let's go! I need to check something out."

My knuckles were white on the arm rest as Sean slowly navigated the slippery mountain road. Conditions were shitty. Mother Nature had let loose with blinding snow and howling winds that shoved the car all over the lane. Snow was piling up, and the tires were slipping. Off to my right, the ravine was bottomless in the failing light. I gripped the arm rest harder and closed my eyes when the car suddenly slid sideways. _Oh God, please get me off this mountain._

"Are you _praying_?"

"No . . ."

"Mica, do you really think I'm going to get us killed this way? In a _car_ wreck? Come on, you should know better by now!" He was both amused and irritated.

The car slid across the road again, but he expertly brought it back to our lane. I sighed. Okay, so he was a good driver. Maybe I didn't really need to pray, but I didn't let go of the arm rest until we got to the main highway below the mountain. The weather was better here. It was still snowing, but the wind wasn't blowing as hard. The roads weren't covered in snow yet so I relaxed. We were probably safe enough. Sean seemed to be on autopilot. He was completely focused on something I didn't see. He drove perfectly well, but I wasn't sure he was really seeing the road. I asked him what he saw, and he shushed me. Intrigued, I sat back and shut up. We were on a small road out in the middle of nowhere. I was lost about twenty minutes ago. The road cut through a valley that had a series of rolling hills on one side and a forest on the other. The hills were probably part of someone's farm; barns dotted the landscape in the twilight. The forest was dark and creepy as only bare trees in winter can be. It conjured up thoughts of werewolves.

It was fully dark when Sean pulled the car to a stop on the side of the road. "Okay, you stay here, and I'll go check this out."

"What? I'm not staying here! Are you crazy?"

He leaned all the way into my personal space, and ordered, "Stay here. I don't know what's over there, and you aren't armed. Stay put and _don't_ make me chase you down when it's time to go."

I bristled at his bossy tone, but he was right. I wasn't armed. "Fine, I'll stay here."

"Good girl. Turn the car around for me. I'll be back as fast as I can." He squeezed my knee, and added, "Don't go anywhere!"

As he disappeared through the trees, I got out of the car to switch seats. The woods seemed to close in. Malevolent eyes weighed heavily between my shoulder blades, and I whipped around with a scream halfway out of my mouth. A shadow moved in the tree line. My heart stopped in my chest, and I froze with my hand on the door handle. What was it? Demon? Wolf? Vampire?

I frantically searched the trees but didn't see anything unnatural. There was nothing but dark trunks against white snow for as far as my eyes could see. The feeling of being watched was gone. Geez. I'm going to give myself a stroke. Note to self—cut back on the horror movies.

With my imagination firmly in check, I threw myself into the driver's seat. After turning the car around, per orders from Sean, I sat there trying to see into the darkness as if I had x-ray vision or something. Where _was_ he? He'd been gone more than fifteen minutes. The snow was coming down so heavily that I couldn't see out the window. Visions of being buried alive popped into my not-helpful imagination. I flipped on the wipers and defroster and fidgeted with the radio dials. Come on, come on. _Where are you, Sean?_ In the movies, it's always the girl who gets eaten first . . .

What was that? A flicker of light illuminated the trees. I strained to see, but the snow distorted everything. There it was again! This was a bigger flash, spread across a wider space. Slipping from the car, I peered into the woods, ears straining. Muffled popping noises accompanied more bursts of light.

"What the heck?"

I moved away from the car, trying to get a handle on where the sounds were coming from. The wind shifted and brought with it the staccato sound of automatic weapons.

"Shit, shit, shit!"

Where is Sean? The sound of weapons fire was getting closer now. I sprinted back to the car for cover. They were getting closer. The muzzle flashes were clearly visible. I counted six shooters.

Shadows moved in the tree line. Sean and Killian appeared dragging someone between them. They hit the car doors at a full run just as three men came out of the trees behind them. Bullets tore through the side window, imploding glass hitting me in the face. The sound was deafening. I threw myself across the seat and slammed my foot on the gas pedal. The tires slipped all over the place, but we managed to get out of range.

Perfectly calm, as if he did this every day, Sean said, "Nice driving. Now slow down and give me the wheel."

"What?" I wasn't slowing this car down until we were back in Plattsburgh or Canada maybe.

He laid his hand over mine and squeezed. "There's time. Trust me."

After a mile or two, I let off the gas just enough to climb out of the driver's seat and crawl into the back. Sean took the wheel and floored it. Killian climbed into the front seat and started barking orders.

That was close. Too close. Thanks to a sharp jolt of adrenaline, my heart was pounding a hundred miles an hour. I was struggling to take a deep breath, wheezing as I gasped for air. Bright spots of color danced in my eyes and my head bobbed forward. Biting my lip, I slammed my eyes closed and tried not to faint.

Killian grabbed my knee. "Get it together! Now! There's no time for you to lose it. Are you hurt?"

The smell of iron was overpowering. Someone was bleeding. My jacket sleeve was sticky with blood. I couldn't tell if it was mine or not, because I was so full of adrenaline I couldn't feel anything. Surprised at the blood, I held up my hand to Killian. He brought it to his nose.

"Not yours. It's his. Finish checking yourself and hurry up. You could be bleeding to death right now."

Yikes! Wouldn't I know if I were bleeding to death? Maybe not . . . I did as I was told and took some of my layers off. Under the jacket and fleece, I found a neat little hole in my arm. It seemed to go right through my bicep. There was a hole on both sides. That was good, right? It was only my arm. Probably I wouldn't bleed to death right now. Even so, I was bleeding _a lot_. My shirt was soaked. My stomach churned, and my head started to spin.

"Uh, guys, I have a problem back here . . ."

Cold hands on my neck dragged me from the black tunnel I'd fallen into. My eyes fluttered open to see Killian leaning over me. His scruffy cheek rasped against mine as he hissed commands into my ear. "Mica! Don't pass out on me! You can be sick later!"

He tied a ripped piece of his t-shirt around my arm before strapping the other guy into a seat belt and covering him with one of Domino's car blankets. Probably a smart move since Sean's driving left a lot to be desired. The car slid wildly to one side, throwing Killian against him hard enough to make him grunt in pain. The guy in the blanket didn't make a sound. That wasn't a good sign.

"Please tell me this guy isn't dead."

"Not yet," Killian replied.

Sean's eyes met mine in the rearview mirror. "Don't worry about him. Keep pressure on your arm and don't pass out! You might have to run."

Killian seconded that order and added that there might be more shooting . . . while I was running . . . _Don't pass out?_ It was easy for them to say . . . They weren't bleeding all over the place with a possibly dead guy strapped into the seat with them.

We had to slow down once we got into Burlington. The streets were mostly empty due to the crappy weather, but we still had to be careful not to slide into anyone. Sean was swearing softly in another language and tapping the steering wheel impatiently as we idled at a red light. Killian systematically scanned the area. An ambulance with its lights flashing drove by to the right, and a police car sat in the opposite lane. The officer looked into the car with interest. I slunk lower into the seat and crossed my fingers. Sean and Killian looked like suspicious people on a good day. Right now, they looked worse. They were splattered with blood. The side of the car was riddled with bullet holes, and one of the side windows was spider-webbed with broken glass.

Sure, officer. We're completely innocent.

The light changed, and we pulled forward at the same time as the police car. The officer considered Sean as he passed by. Sean fixed his eyes on the officer's face, murmuring under his breath. Amazingly, the police car kept going.

"What did you do?" I asked, fascinated. I swung around to look behind us, but the police car was gone.

"I just reminded him that he had something important to do back at the station." He turned onto the interstate with a tight smile.

We had to go a few more miles to the ferry, and then we'd be back in Plattsburgh in about fifteen minutes. This was too easy—I had a bad feeling about this—Time was running out. My chest was heavy with dread. Something bad was about to happen. Unable to resist the urge, I scanned the road behind us as if the boogey-man was going to jump out of the trees. A pair of headlights appeared, and they were moving really fast. Oh, crap!

"Sean! Go faster! We've got company!"

Killian swung around. "Sonofabitch!" He pulled out his Sig and checked the rounds. "Get to the ferry!"

The headlights were attached to a Humvee, and it was closing in fast. Sean punched the gas. The Humvee wasn't as fast but stayed close. There was no way we'd be able to outrun it forever. I saw the sign for the ferry station and turned to peek out the back window. It shattered directly above my head. I screamed and threw myself across blanket-guy as another bullet crashed into the window. Chunks of glass rained down as I frantically unbuckled the seat belt and dragged him to the floorboards. I pressed myself on top of him and squeezed my eyes shut.

The tires left the ground as Sean whipped off the interstate to Hwy 2. The car landed hard but stayed on the road. Killian was calmly firing behind us, the sound deafening inside the car. I guess he hit someone because the bullets stopped crashing into us. He reloaded as we raced down the bridge to the ferry platform.

I peered up between the front seats and was relieved to see the ferry was mostly empty and just about to pull away from the dock. The car fishtailed down the lane and onto the dock with the Humvee close behind us. A ferry worker was about to hook the chain across the back of the boat when Sean punched the gas to launch us forward. The poor guy dove out of the way and rolled to the other side of the deck. We skidded to a stop without killing a single person. The ferry was already moving when the Humvee skittered onto the ramp. It was going too fast to stop and went off the edge into the lake with a splash.

The ferry crossing only takes twelve minutes. The police would probably be on the way to the Plattsburgh docks. We were trapped on this boat with no way to get off without being seen. I didn't dare get out of the car, because I was covered in blood. I had to pee but now wasn't probably a good time to bring that up.

"Killian, what are we going to do now?" I asked.

"Be quiet, I'm thinking."

"Sean?" I asked.

"Shh!"

"What if you call Dec and he distracts the police? Could he do that?"

My idea was met with stony silence. Okay, so maybe that's not a good idea . . .

Killian ruffled my hair, and announced, "That's a brilliant idea. And it might even work too." He closed his eyes and sent a telepathic message to Dec. Yet another awesomely cool psychic ability the Primani had.

Sean turned around and tried to smile reassuringly at me but failed. He was wound like a spring and ready to fight. Instead of smiling, he said, "Good idea, babe. I hope it works. We've got to get out of here and get him some help."

"Who _is_ he? What happened to him?

"I don't know his name, but he's Primani like us. He's been tortured, and I don't know if he'll live or not. We need to get him to a safe house."

"Wouldn't it be easier to teleport him somewhere?"

He sighed long and hard. "Yes, it would. But I can't leave you here alone; especially now that you've been seen by Dagin's crew."

"Dagin?"

"He's a demon. We go way back. We have a few clashes with him every so many years, and then he disappears for a while. We haven't been able to vanquish him because he runs every time we close in. He'll use you to get to us if he can."

Killian spoke up. "That's why I'll take him to the safe house, and you two will drive down with Dec and our supplies. We'll probably be in the city for a while so we'll need things. Mica, make an excuse to your parents so they don't send out more police. We don't need more complications—this is going to be hard enough."

"Where are we going?"

"Manhattan."

# Chapter 18: Escape to New York

"MICA? WAKE UP, DARLIN'. You're dreaming." A faraway voice called my name.

I'd barely fallen asleep when the nightmare caught me by surprise. I was back in the forest with the usual misshapen creature stalking me. Instead of running blindly this time, I strode ahead, determined to ignore the darkness that hovered on my left. Despite my boldness, my skin prickled with fear. Any second now it would attack as it did in all of my dreams. But it didn't.

Instead, it paced my steps, shadowing me . . . waiting. The path wound this way and that until I came to a brilliantly lit clearing. Sean! There was no reason to be afraid now—the welcoming glow promised safety—but as soon as I approached, the light changed. It expanded and contracted oddly. It flickered like an old star. I started running. It expanded and contracted faster and faster, creating a sound wave that pierced my eardrums.

"No! Wait! Don't go!" I dove towards the light as it imploded in a blinding explosion. As I landed on my stomach, the creature pounced.

The darkness pressed me into the boggy ground. I struggled to free myself, but the force was relentless. Slowly sinking, I shrieked for help, twisting my face to the side to keep from choking. The forest floor continued to cover me, cloaking me in the musky black dirt, burying me. My mouth filled with it as I screamed. Until the world slammed to the right, and I was falling . . .

"Mica! Come on, baby girl, breathe for me."

Someone hit me in the chest once, then twice. _Oxygen. I need oxygen._ I tried to sit up, but something heavy was holding me down. Panicked, I started thrashing at my unseen attacker. Someone grabbed both of my hands and held me still.

Urgent voices finally broke through the dream's fog.

"Damn it, woman! You come back to me right now or I'll hunt you down wherever you go!" Sean resorted to threats since pleading wasn't bringing me around.

The desperation in his voice tugged at my heart. I opened my eyes and coughed. Sean and Dec grabbed me at the same time. They hugged me so hard I broke into another painful coughing fit.

"Don't ever do that again! You scared the hell out of us!" Sean was yelling and rocking me against his chest at the same time, his expression full of panic.

"Wow! That was some dream. Tell me, were you in a forest?" Speaking through thinned lips, Dec's voice sounded oddly pained.

"How could you know that?"

He drew a finger down my cheek and held it up. It was coated with spongy black loam.

Ewww! I staggered over to a clean-looking snow pile on the side of the road. Yes, it was freezing cold and dark as hell out in the middle of nowhere. But I was absolutely _not_ getting into the car covered with dirt that shouldn't exist in the first place.

"What the hell? What kind of creepy shit are you getting me into? I never had these dreams until I met you two!" I was totally freaked out and wanted answers. Biting my lip to keep it from quivering, I washed off in the snow.

Dec shrugged. "Don't look at me! I've never had this effect on a woman before."

"Well?" I asked Sean as I stuffed my arms into a clean sweater.

He frowned, puzzled. "No dirt in the car. It's bizarre. We're nearly to the city anyway. Don't fall asleep again. We'll get answers from someone at the safe house." He held the door, and I gingerly climbed into the front seat. I didn't trust the back seat anymore.

By the time we reached the Tappan Zee Bridge on the Hudson River, the sun was starting to rise, and I was bouncing on the edge of the seat with excitement. Near-death experience aside, I was ever the optimist. We were going to have fun in the city.

"This is so cool! Look at that river!" My head was swiveling from right to left, trying to take in everything at once.

Large sheets of ice floated against the banks, the shimmering water visible underneath them. The snow from last night glowed ghostly white in random places. The dark water looked decidedly uninviting in the early morning light. The long roadway rose gradually as we approached the middle of the river and leveled off under the main bridge structure. I craned my neck to look into the cobweb of steel beams above us.

Dec's excitement showed in the brilliant smile that graced his face. "I love this place! It's my favorite city on earth."

He was driving the last bit of the trip so Sean could focus on security. Sean was in the back with his eyes closed. He _said_ he wasn't sleeping; he _said_ he was trying to pick up any traces of demons in the area. Hmm. For someone who was _not_ sleeping, he was pretty relaxed . . .

"Can you feel the energy? It's so _alive_!" Dec drove casually with one wrist balanced on top of the steering wheel, beaming as he navigated through morning commuters. "All these people! So many souls."

Traffic was building as we got closer to Manhattan. It was stop and go until we got onto East River Drive. Roosevelt Island loomed in shadows on our left. Tall buildings crouched as far as I could see. Were those apartments? I gazed at them as we made our way up the side of the island. Lights twinkled in some windows, but most were still dark. Dec made a series of turns to bring us westward. The sun was fully up now, and the buildings cast shadows ahead of us as we made our way across the city.

"Do you know where we're going?" I asked.

A grumpy Sean answered, "Gramercy Park—and I can't wait to get there—this place _screams_ demons _,_ every place we turn. Their energy's making me sick. It's a disgusting city."

"Oh, so you _are_ awake."

His mouth pulled into a sour grin as he grunted something I didn't quite hear but sounded like, _smart ass_. To Dec, he said, "Okay, you're going to pull into that parking garage on the next block and park in a penthouse spot. They're marked."

"So I have a question. You keep talking about demons running around causing problems. Are there angels here too?"

Sean and Dec did that mental conversation thing that annoyed the heck out of me before Sean replied, "Some, yes. Probably more than I know about. You'll get to meet a few at the penthouse. Alex is a working angel. The house manager is too."

Real angels? Should this make me happy or terrified? What are they like? "What do they look like? Do they have wings?"

With just a trace of laughter in his voice, Dec answered, "They look like people here on the human plane. They generally keep the wings stashed. There's a lot of power in those feathers so they won't risk losing any. Not to mention, they'd stick out like a sore thumb with their wings extended all the time."

I wasn't sure what to say. I'd had some time to get used to Primani. Their powers and my new psychic ability were finally feeling familiar. I'd accepted them at face value. Angels, though? What would they be like? How do they stand on smiting? For or against?

"How am I supposed to act? I don't want to insult them."

Sean waved a hand in front of my face. "Hey. Don't stress. They're not douchebags like the ones on TV. They'll be nice to you. Just be your normal respectful human self."

I snorted at his description. "Thanks. I think."

Dec interrupted my next thought. "Just don't ask to see their wings. That's kind of personal. Like asking to see their nipples."

In front of us was one of the most beautiful buildings I'd ever seen. Old and quaint, it was made of red brick with some kind of curling trim around the top of the main floors. _Was that a gargoyle?_ The unique building charmed me immediately.

In spite of the throbbing in my arm, I was still trying to see everything at once. After we parked, the guys grabbed our bags and quickly shuffled me into the building. I tried to protest that we were moving too fast, but Dec shushed me and gave me a nudge to keep walking. Geez! These guys were like hot and cold today! I barely had time to see the lobby. The walls were covered in stained glass artwork and blood-red velvet draperies. Elegant crystal chandeliers sparkled in the dim morning light. The floors were black and white marble and were covered with red carpets. Pretty little seating areas were scattered around with antique tables and chairs. I wanted to look around, but Dec firmly guided me to the nearest elevator. Sean was on my right side, scanning everything we passed. A uniformed concierge approached to ask if we needed any help. Sean's fierce expression relaxed into an easy smile. He casually explained we were meeting friends and were expected. He waved a hand over our general disreputable appearance, and commented that we'd had a car accident and really needed to freshen up. The nice man swallowed the story and wished us a good day.

Once in the elevator, I collapsed in laughter. "How do you _do_ that?" I leaned up to kiss him.

Smiling a little smugly, he draped an arm around me. "Mind control. It's no big thing."

Dec rolled his eyes and cleared his throat. "Show off."

"Can you do it too, Dec?"

He broke into a warm laugh. "Oh, yeah. It's one of my many talents. We can all do it to a degree, but Sean's one of the best there is. I've got other mad skills that he doesn't though."

Really? "Such as?"

In typical Dec fashion, he dropped a kiss on the top of my head and lowered his voice to be purposely mysterious. "All in good time. You can't learn all of our secrets at once. It's our mystery that keeps you coming around."

The elevator crawled to the top floor and spit us out into an opulent foyer. The walls were rich blue and dotted with geometric paintings in bright colors. The black marble floors glistened in the dim lights. The penthouse door was made from a very dark wood and had an antique brass knocker in the center. A spunky golden cherub smiled up at us from an alcove beside the door. Everything was elegant . . . maybe too elegant.

"Are you sure we're in the right place?"

"This is the place." He knocked on the door with enough force to make me jump.

A well-dressed older man pulled open the door and waved us inside.

"Good morning, young ones! I'm Jordan. I'm the house manager here. Everyone has been waiting anxiously for you to arrive. I'm very glad to see you made it safely. Follow me, please." With that greeting, he swept regally into a dimly lit hallway.

"My first angel!" I fairly giggled in Sean's ear.

His mouth quirked with amusement but made no comment.

Jordan led us into the living room where several men were talking. I recognized two of those men immediately. I breathed a sigh of relief at Killian's tense face. Unconsciously, I squeezed my locket. _Oh, thank God you're okay!_

His sleek, dark head snapped up. _Aw, I didn't know you cared._

"Of course I do, you idiot!" The words came out much louder than I planned.

Conversation crashed to a halt. Everyone looked at me. Oops. Did I say that out loud? I flushed beet red. Killian's wicked eyes latched onto mine as he strode over to me. Dec looked confused as he glanced back and forth between me and Killian. _I_ was definitely confused. What did I do now? The other three men came over to listen with curious expressions.

Killian was beaming with pride. "Do you know what just happened? _Do_ you?" Vibrating with energy, he was searching my eyes again.

Irritated, I shut them.

"Knock it off! I don't know what you're talking about. You said, 'Aw, I didn't know you cared,' in your typical smartass tone, and I called you an idiot. What's the big deal?"

Smiling like a cat that just ripped the canary to shreds and ate him with Sriracha sauce, he said patiently, "No, Mica. I didn't _say_ anything to you. You picked up my thoughts and answered me out loud." I must've looked stumped because he added, "You still don't get it? Your psychic ability is getting stronger. Good job, girl!"

He patted me on the head like a dog, completely ruining the praise. Typical.

Before I could kick him, Raphael interrupted us, "Sean, help your Mica over here so I can look at her arm. I can smell the blood from here."

Thanks to a couple of pain pills I got from Dec, I'd almost forgotten about my arm, but now the throbbing came back in full force. It _did_ seem to be bleeding again. My sleeve was sticking to my arm. Yuck. Raphael took one look at the mess and got down to business.

"Scissors, please."

Jordan brought him a pair of scissors and a first aid kit. While he worked on cutting my sleeve away, the other two men introduced themselves. They were Zadkiel and Alex. Zadkiel was a trim older man with a mane of silver hair that framed a soft cherubic face. He had green eyes that sparkled when he shook my good hand. He explained that he was here to help the injured Primani and was very glad to meet me, since he normally didn't get out among humans. I was the topic of a lot of speculation right now. I glanced at Sean who simply shrugged. He had no comment.

Raphael interrupted Zadkiel. "Well, the bullet went straight through the muscle without tearing a lot of the fibers. That's good because it'll heal more cleanly. But I can help it along if you'd like." He was leaving it up to me this time.

"We have a lot to do while we're here, darlin'. If I were you, I'd take all the help I could get." Dec winked at me.

"As usual, Dec is right. Do you want me to lay down first?"

"As you wish." Raphael waved a hand toward the couch.

Sometime later, I rolled over and looked at my watch. Oh, surely not? It couldn't be so late! The sun had already set, and the city was sparkling in its nighttime finery. Sliding open a glass door, I slipped out to the rooftop garden and leaned on the wrought iron railing that stood between me and certain death eighteen stories below. Wow! So many lights everywhere. They were like stars. The view was breathtaking.

"Oh good, you're up." Sean came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, skimming my belly with his fingertips. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"

"Not so disgusting now, huh?" I snuggled against him, and he sighed against my hair.

"It's not all bad, I know that. But there are a lot of demons in this city. We have a lot of work to do."

His woodsy fragrance curled around me, lulling me, drawing my blood to my center. He was still damp from a shower. I rubbed my palms over the taut muscle in his forearms, enjoying the feel of his skin against mine. If I moved very slowly I could feel the blood moving under his skin. I was starting to get used to the slight pulsing that was a part of him. The _saol_ was always there, just below the surface . . . just below his human façade. It was hard to remember that he— _they_ —weren't entirely human. I still wasn't sure what that really meant, but I didn't care anymore. They were better people than most real people, and I loved them completely. Right now, all I cared about was this moment with Sean.

The feeling of dread was still lingering in the back of my mind. I didn't know how much time we had left. I thought of the dream and the darkness and shuddered. If the light represented Sean, who was the darkness? What did it mean that the light exploded like a supernova? Surely that wasn't a premonition of some kind. It has to be symbolic. But what did it mean?

I turned around and wrapped my arms around his waist. His heart beat reassuringly against my cheek, and I closed my eyes. We might not have forever, but we had today.

All too soon, my little slice of Heaven was gone. Alex called us back to the living room for a meeting. Killian was pacing in front of a wall-sized window while Dec draped himself across a chair. He was staring into space, toying absently with a guitar pick. He frowned at something I couldn't see. My stomach clenched in response.

Raphael stood to greet me. "How are you feeling tonight?"

I forced a grin and did a bicep curl. "It's much better now. Thank you again, for healing me _again_." I grimaced, and added, "I hope we can meet sometime when I'm not deathly sick, beaten up, or shot."

A shadow passed over his eyes, and he said, "I hope so too. But we don't always get what we want, do we?"

Alex got the meeting started. Clearly, he was important. An air of command entered the room ahead of him. No one would mess with this angel. He wasn't physically impressive, like Sean or Killian, but his authority was practically stamped on his forehead. He stood about six feet tall with the solid build of a martial arts instructor. His close-cropped hair was more red than brown, and glinted with gold in the light. His face was hard and lean and nowhere near pretty, yet it was strangely compelling. More than one woman probably tossed her morals to the side for a few minutes with him. There was something attractive yet scary about him.

As the Primani's official mentor or boss, he called all the shots. He was in charge of the special operations on the east coast. After catching everyone up on recent events, he switched the discussion to the injured Primani. His name is James. He had been worked over meticulously by Dagin's thugs and was still not completely conscious. For some reason, he hadn't been able to heal himself and was slipping away. Zadkiel was a specialist in healing emotional or mental injuries, and he and Raphael were trying to help him.

"We _need_ to talk to James. We're still not sure why he was held or what Dagin's doing out in the middle of Vermont. Unfortunately, our efforts to bring him around are not working, and I'm worried he might not survive at all. He's just not healing. Mica, this is where you come in."

All eyes turned to me. "Me? What can I do?" Surprised, I automatically sought Sean, and he gave me an encouraging nod.

Alex replied, "By now, you may have realized you're an anomaly. Your transformation has been incredible and not to be taken lightly." He put his hands behind his back and paced as he continued, "Now, when I first heard about Sean's _indiscretion_ with you, I was furious. For him to take such a risk with your life, not to mention exposing us to a human, well, I was ready to recall him and assign Killian to watch over you. But . . ." He smiled slightly at Raphael, "calmer minds prevailed that day. And after Killian explained your new abilities, we came to believe your transformation was predestined. You should know that Killian was impressed with how you handled yourself and pled your case for you. You can thank him for your continued existence in this group." He paused for effect.

Killian was mortified by this revelation and scowled at me behind Alex's back. Dec broke into a violent coughing fit. Sean stiffened next to me. All I could think of was how different my life would be if I was Killian's charge. That would totally suck! I thought of the day in the snow when he tried to teach me to shoot my new Sig. He was a hard man and pushed me without mercy. I almost lost some toes that day . . . but in the end, he showed surprising kindness. In fact, he'd shown me a lot of kindness this year. He might act like a jerk and boss everyone around, but in the end, he always took care of us, of me. I looked over at him with love shining in my eyes.

_You're not such a tough guy after all, are you, big brother?_ I sent the thought to him with a watery smile.

To my intense surprise, he actually blushed, but then snapped, "I should've let your toes fall off!"

Right. There's the Killian I know and love. "Uh, so back to James . . . What do you want me to do, exactly?" I asked Alex to break the sudden weird tension.

"I want you to talk to him. That's all."

"That's it? I can do that, but I don't know how that could possibly help him—"

"Just spend some time with him, and we'll see what happens. It certainly can't hurt him to hear the voice of a pretty girl, now can it?"

He smiled a genuine smile. Just for a moment, it transformed his face like a light switch. Suddenly he wasn't ordinary at all. He was fiercely beautiful like the statues of angels I'd seen in church a very long time ago. He was proud and dangerous. Powerful. I blinked, and his face was normal again. I edged a little closer to Sean.

So my job was to work a small, minor miracle with James, while the guys went out into the city to look for someone. They planned their mission while I was asleep earlier, so I had no idea what they were up to. Sean wasn't talking about it and got a little snippy with me when I tried to pry it out of him. He was edgy and wound up again. He'd been tense since we got here, and it was making me nervous. They were in the foyer strapping on their guns while I nervously twisted my locket back and forth. Something just wasn't right here. I didn't know what it was, but I had a bad feeling about this mission of theirs. Seemingly oblivious to my thoughts, Sean tossed Dec a pair of black gloves. I didn't want them to go.

"Guys, wait! Don't go! I have a bad feeling about this." I reached out to Sean, and he wrapped his arms around me and tilted my chin up for a kiss.

"We have to go, love. This is what we do, remember? We'll be fine, so don't worry tonight." His words were supposed to reassure me, but he held me against him like this was goodbye. Then they were gone. I didn't feel him leave my arms. He was just gone . . . like he never existed.

Raphael was waiting in the doorway when I turned around. His eyes were thoughtful as they took in my frown. "Real intuition is nearly always right—it's the timing that you can't predict. Come. They'll be back tonight."

James was lying on a bed in another of the bedrooms. Someone had washed him and dressed him in a soft blue robe. He could have been sleeping except for his eyes. _My God_. I stopped and stared. What did they _do_ to him? His beautiful blue eyes were staring at horrors only he could see. The rest of his face was composed in sleep, but his eyes! Horrified, I turned my back and squeezed my own eyes together. I took a deep breath. Okay, get it together. It's not like they've been cut out of his face after all—they're just open and staring—and creepy. I can deal with creepy, can't I? Everyone's counting on me . . . Surely I can do _something_ to comfort him. Maybe he needs a woman's touch. Well, I'm the only woman around here, so I'm going to have to give it a shot. I can't make things worse for him.

First things first, I bandaged his eyes. There. That was much less drafty for him. Plus, I wouldn't have to look at them. Win. Win. Next, I took a quick inventory of his injuries. Dagin's thugs had worked him over thoroughly enough. Bastards! Every finger on both hands was broken. He had bruises over every inch of his face, which was swollen twice its normal size. He had a long gash along his forehead that needed stitches. It still seeped blood that snaked in a little stream down his neck. I peeled back his robe and froze. He had a long ragged burn across his chest. The flesh was blackened and raw. The wound was still oozing blood and an odd-looking golden fluid. It had to be excruciatingly painful. It was a miracle he'd survived this at all.

"Oh, you poor, poor creature." I didn't intend to weep, but a few tears leaked out anyway. I sat at his bedside and prayed for him until my throat was hoarse. A feeling of déjà vu swept over me, giving me a small twinge of hope. Sean had survived, so maybe James would too. How had Sean done it?

Killian once told me they could heal themselves, but they had to remain completely focused. It took immense concentration to focus their _saol_ on the wounds that needed healing. They were completely vulnerable while they healed. So James should be able to heal himself but obviously wasn't. What's the problem?

I paced across the room, muttering to myself. I stared unseeing out the window, wracking my brain. I was missing something. We all were. The feeling of impending disaster was back. The seconds were passing like the ticking of a bomb. _Think!_ The answer has to be here. I pressed my fingers into my temples and rubbed.

I ranted to my invisible adversaries. "What did you _do_ to him? Dagin, you disgusting demon! I swear I will hunt you down and kill you myself!"

Frustrated, I went back to the bed and examined James while willing an answer to jump up and show itself. Something was slightly different about him now. I stared until my eyes cramped. Was his breathing different? That was it! Straining to hear, I put my ear close to his chest. Hours ago, his breathing had been shallow, like a man in pain. He was breathing more deeply now. That seemed like a good sign. I inspected the cuts and burns. They were still seeping blood and fluid. No change there. Hmm, that wasn't good.

Oh, _come on_ , give me a break here! I blinked back frustrated tears and started talking to James. Maybe he'd respond to my voice. I put on my best cheerful tone and settled down to tell him my life story. This would take a while, and I wouldn't have to think too hard. It was 3:00 in the morning, and I was too exhausted to be creative.

I fell asleep somewhere around discovering my love for Sean only to wake abruptly when I fell out of my chair. I jerked upright when I was halfway to the floor. I stumbled over to check on my patient. The bandage had slipped below one of his eyes. The creepy thing was still staring into space. Too groggy to be repulsed, I peered into his eye and saw what James was staring at with such horror.

"Alex! Raphael! Get up. Get up!" I ran through the hallway, banging on all the bedroom doors like a crazy person. "Get up! I've got it!"

Twenty minutes later, Sean and Dec were back but not on my side. "No way. It's too dangerous."

"But it's the only way! I've got to try!" I begged Sean to give in.

Killian, bless him, actually supported me. After hearing me out, he gave me a long appraising look, and announced, "I agree with Mica. It makes sense. If anyone can do this, it's going to be her." Sean began to sputter, but he held up a hand. "Sean, I know you don't want to hear this, but the truth is her inner mind is connected with mine. I know how strong she is now. I know it up here." He tapped his temple. "I can help her with this."

Sean grabbed Killian, and snarled, "You'd let her destroy her mind?" He flung him away in disgust. "Of course, you would. Anything for the greater good, right?" He stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

I made a move to follow him, but Raphael put his hand out to stop me. "We're running out of time. If we're going to try this, we need to do it now. Sean will be okay, Mica. He's angry because he's worried about you. He'll be all right once he walks it off."

A few minutes later, we were ready to try my plan. Raphael propped James into a sitting position. Killian and I were sitting on either side of James. Dec, still protesting bitterly, refused to leave my side. He was the only one who could help me afterwards. I was nauseous remembering the last time I'd tried this and nearly lost my memories and one of my eyes. Dec absolutely refused to release my hand. I didn't have the heart to point out that he was hurting me. Killian was casually holding my other hand in one of his big paws. He said it might strengthen our mental connection, but maybe he's scared too. I was terrified.

He actually smiled a little at that. _Do you ever shut up?_

I dug a nail into his hand, smirking when he grimaced. I took a deep breath and got to work. James' irises were separated into a hundred different shades of blue and green that fit together like an intricate puzzle. Behind those beautiful colors was a wall of flames. The flames were raging out of control so I couldn't see behind them. I focused harder on the flames and tried to move them out of the way, like pulling up a piece of a puzzle. They wobbled a bit but didn't move for me. I gritted my teeth and focused harder. A bead of sweat slipped from my hairline with the effort.

Killian sent his thoughts to me. _Let me in. I can help you move it_.

I relaxed a little and sensed, rather than felt, Killian's will join mine. I pictured the puzzle piece again and started to peel it up. This time it moved a bit. Yes!

_Calmly_ , he cautioned.

Moving very precisely, we peeled the piece back and laid it facedown. A wave of images struck me like a tsunami. This was no kaleidoscope of random impressions or memories. This was a full-blown attack against my invasion. The images bombarded me from all directions and threatened to overwhelm me. They shrieked defiantly as they flew at me. I saw James tied to a chair in dark room . . . the roof of a farmhouse with soldiers standing on it . . . tracers from a machine gun . . . James slumped over on the floor with blood running from his mouth . . . an odd-looking gun on a table . . . then an evil face laughing up at me . . . instead of flickering away like the other images, it pressed closer, becoming clearer. I tried to flinch, but I couldn't look away, couldn't break the contact.

Out of nowhere, words struck like stray bullets: Guardian! Protector! Primani! As abruptly as they came, the words stopped flying, and the images flowed in slow motion like an old broken movie. The evil face sneered with recognition. Demon!

He taunted, " _I see you, Mica! Want to come and play with me_?"

Ice dribbled down my spine as his voice echoed. The sudden feeling of dread was so powerful that I whimpered. Every one of my instincts screamed, _run!_ But my brain wasn't sending signals to my feet. Frozen in place, I couldn't pull my eyes away from James. I couldn't pull my mind away.

" _Come on, Mica, come play with me . . . Look! Your mother's here_!" he said in a sing-song voice, dripping with malice.

Images of my mother burning in the flames bombarded me. She was screaming for me to save her. As I watched helplessly, she turned to ash and blew away into a firestorm. No! No! Come back! I started to chase her into the flames . . .

_Mica! Don't! Stand still!_ Killian's voice cracked like a whip.

I froze. _He's got my mother!_

No, he doesn't. It's a trick to distract you. Don't follow the demon!

He yanked me back to safety. Digging in my heels, I narrowed my eyes. So the ugly demon wants to play, does he?

Bring it, filthy soul sucker!

Showing rows of nasty fangs, the demon smiled at my challenge. He stepped up his efforts and flung hundreds of horrifying images at me, but I tossed them aside like garbage. I was getting tired and had to save James before my brain simply shut down from exhaustion. We needed to end this.

Okay, big brother, keep up!

As quickly as the demon flung the images, I grabbed them and forced them into a box. Killian took over while I relentlessly stalked the demon. The demon lost confidence when he realized he was outnumbered, and one of us was Primani. He backed away. I ignored the grotesque pictures of my mother. They weren't real. I wasn't paying attention now. I wanted him in this box I made. He had to go. He was killing James. We were going to end this now. I backed him into a corner of sorts, and he froze for a last stand. He raised his arm and fire oozed from his claws.

_Really? Is that all you've got?_ It was my turn to taunt him.

He unleashed an arc of flame just as Killian dropped a gold chain around him and tossed him into the box.

Awareness came back slowly. I steadied myself for the usual Tilt-o-Whirl sensation, but it didn't come. Instead, Dec clutched me to his chest, sobbing against my hair, chanting, "Please come back. Please come back. Please come back."

Holding my hand in a death grip, Killian lay sprawled like a broken doll with eyes wide open, staring into space. Were my eyes open too? That would explain Dec's hysterics. It was unnerving. I tried to reassure him but nothing came out. I tried again—still no sound. Frantic now, I tried to speak again, but still nothing. This was bad . . .

_Mica? Are you here?_ He sounded strained even inside my head.

Oh, thank God! Killian, what's going on? Why can't I talk?

I think we have a problem, babe.

# Chapter 19: Back from the Edge

"DAMN IT, SEAN, JUST CALM DOWN for a minute! It's not as bad as you think." Alex was forcibly keeping Sean from ripping me out of Dec's arms. Actually, it was Alex, Raphael, and Zadkiel _trying_ to hold him, yet Sean was still dragging them over to where I was lying. Dec tightened his grip and continued pleading in my ear. He'd given up crying and resorted to begging quietly. He thought he could reach me wherever I had gone off to. I heard his words but couldn't answer him. His anguish was breaking my heart into tiny little pieces.

"This is _his_ fault!" Sean lunged for Killian's inert body. Alex threw himself against Sean's legs, sending them both crashing to the floor. Temporarily insane, Sean struggled to get up, swearing in a language that might have been Latin. Alex finally punched him in the jaw to stop him.

"Stop it! Right now! Don't you see they're still joined? If you rip them apart, one of them could be lost—maybe Killian, maybe Mica. Who are you willing to lose?" Alex yelled.

"Fuck! We could live without Killian!"

"Sean!" Raphael actually sounded shocked. "That's quite enough."

Breathing hard, Sean lowered his head for a minute before getting up to pace. I guess he wasn't one to get hysterical for long. He pointed to the demon in the chair.

"What's with the prisoner?"

"Oh, him? He's a gift from those two over there," Alex answered with a hint of sarcasm.

"Come again?" Sean peered more closely into the demon's face. His mouth was smooshed flat with duct tape. He mostly made grunting noises and wriggled his weird eyebrows a lot. Sean dismissed him.

"Mica's plan worked, you see. Except that, apparently, there was a demon actually possessing James. She and Killian managed to corral the scum and evict him. Just before they collapsed on the floor, the demon flew out of James and landed at my feet." Alex shook his head ruefully. "It was the strangest thing. He was wrapped in the chain from Mica's locket and couldn't get loose."

He pierced Sean with a steady look. "You gave her that locket. What's the chain made of?"

Sean turned positively green, swallowing so hard his Adam's apple bobbed. "The three of us made it to link her to us to keep her safe."

"Yes, but what's it made of?"

Sean refused to meet his eyes.

Alex blanched. "You didn't? Tell me you didn't!"

"She has our blood too, Alex! It was necessary!"

"Are you insane?"

Okay, this was getting ridiculous. Everyone was losing their minds, and I was lying here staring like a possessed china doll. This had to stop. There had to be a solution . . . With that in mind, I called Killian. No response. I called him again.

Killian! Get back here!

You don't have to scream; I can hear you just fine. What?

What do you mean, 'what?' We have to get back. Look at them! They're having kittens, and my eyes are drying out!

If a disembodied voice could shrug, his just did. _Shut up and let me think._

Shut up I did, but not because I wanted to. He really needs to work on his people skills.

"Mica? Can you hear me? Blink or something if you can hear me!" Three inches in front of my face, Sean was searching my eyes for some kind of recognition. He threatened in a low voice, "If you don't come out of there right now, I'm going in after you! James won't mind another hitchhiker!"

Killian exclaimed, _That's it! James! Whatever happens, don't let go of me._

Dec jumped out of his skin and nearly dropped me on the floor. "Did you see that? Their hands twitched!" He crushed me against his chest lest I physically disappear altogether.

Sean urged, "That's my girl! Come on, baby, you got this."

Raphael spoke up. "Alex, James seems to be waking up. His lips are moving, but I can't understand what he's saying. See if you can."

Alex put his ear to James' lips. After a few seconds, he said, "James, this is Alex. You're safe now. If you can hear me, please do as I say immediately."

I strained to hear the rest of it, but Alex turned away, and I couldn't hear him. A few minutes went by, and an odd pressure pushed against me. What the hell was that? It was gentle at first like someone pushing me on a swing . . . back and forth. It knocked me off balance, and I wobbled. Killian's presence was beside me; his strong hand holding me steady. I squeezed until my knuckles were white. The pressure began to build and soon was a strong wind pushing me relentlessly forward. I struggled to stay on my feet.

What's happening?

James is awake. Stop anchoring to him and relax. Just don't let go of me!

It was like standing in a hurricane holding onto a palm tree—I knew I needed to let go and let the wind take me—but my cowardly survival instincts screamed to hang on. I tried to let go, but my hands were too stiff to bend. The winds howled, plucking at my hands until I was slipping off of my anchor. To my horror, my hand was slipping out of Killian's. I tightened my grip as a final jarring shove pushed me off my anchor, whipping me away into nothingness.

I sat straight up with a loud gasp. The room spun and I blinked to clear my eyes. I was back! My head was fuzzy, and my stomach rolled uncomfortably, but I was clearly among the living and sane again.

Sean cried, "Oh, thank God!" and steadied me with both hands.

Searching for awareness, he scrutinized every inch of my face. Was I still locked inside James or was I really back? He peered into my eyes, and I smiled back at him this time. Apparently satisfied that I was conscious for real, he breathed a sigh of relief and bent down to kiss me. He kissed me lightly at first and then crushed me against him. My eyes flew open in surprise, but I quickly got over it and kissed him back with as much enthusiasm. He was kissing me like I just returned from the dead. He shoved Dec rudely away and dragged me against him like a drowning man clings to a life preserver. My own emotions were out of control as I realized how close I came to disappearing. What was I thinking? How would I ever survive in this new world of ours?

Next to us, Killian blinked groggily. His skin was so chalky that his dark blue eyes stood out like fresh bruises. His pupils were still fully dilated. He reminded me of a strange night creature. After a moment of deep breathing, his face regained some color. He frowned at Sean with disapproval. Sean glared and forcibly pried our hands apart.

A dry, scratchy voice interrupted us. "Can someone please do something with this demon? He smells bad."

# Chapter 20: The Seedy Underbelly

AS IT TURNED OUT, the demon was full of information. According to Alex, all evidence suggested there was something unusual going on in Vermont. While I hung out with James, Alex, Killian, and Sean took turns interrogating the demon whose name was Dai Li.

These interrogation sessions were off-limits to me. I was absolutely not allowed in the room with the demon for any reason. I didn't really want to spend time with him anyway, but it chafed to be forbidden. Geez, they treated me like a child. I had to admit Dai Li freaked me out a little. Okay, a lot! His cold sing-song voice echoed in my head if I let my guard down.

I see you, Mica! Want to come and play with me?

The last time I saw him, Killian and Dec were pulling him out of James' room the day of the exorcism. I waited out of the way with Sean, but Dai Li's red eyes held me paralyzed. The duct tape covering his mouth didn't disguise his thoughts. He wasn't done with me yet.

With a stony-pissed-off-boyfriend expression, Sean calmly extended his hand towards Dai Li's eye. The effect on Dai Li was electric. He squinted and flinched away in terror. As Sean's hand got closer, the demon trembled, pleading behind the tape. The hair on my arms stood up as the mewling whine got louder. I tried to step around Sean to see what he was doing, but he blocked me with his other arm. Dec frowned and shook his head at me. He mouthed, _go_. I backed away. Dai Li made a high-pitched keening sound just before the odor of sulfur tickled the back of my throat.

I hadn't seen Dai Li since. I asked Sean what was going on, but he refused to answer. I'd hardly seen him the past few days. He got up early, got back late, took a shower, and crashed. His eyes were hooded whenever he looked at me now. My gut told me he was keeping secrets. I knew it but couldn't bring myself to confront him. The feeling of dread still haunted me, and was getting more and more pronounced as the days turned to weeks. My stomach ached with it, but I had no answers. To make things worse, my playmate was out of reach. Dec was gone for days at a time, and I missed him painfully. Alex had them searching the city for another demon named Xarchi. Dai Li had fingered him as a mid-level demon running operations across Manhattan. Alex felt he would know about other operations in the northeast region. All of them were gone, but I was stuck here with James. Gazing wistfully out the window, I sighed into my tea cup.

"That's the third cup of tea you've let grow cold. Am I such poor company then?" James asked with a sardonic smile.

Chagrined, I said, "I'm sorry, James. It's not you. It's me. I'm the one who's poor company." I saluted him with the cup.

We were in a breakfast nook that was bigger than my entire apartment. After helping himself to coffee and a bagel, he settled into a chair and considered me over the rim of the cup.

"Maybe it's time for us to have a talk." he began.

Uh-oh, this always means bad news. Totally healed now, he was comfortable smiling again and did so now. That smile would be hard to resist if I wasn't already madly in love. His lean face wasn't perfect, but he was attractive enough. Now that he was healed, his olive complexion was clear and vibrant again. The only detraction from his otherwise handsome face was odd caterpillar eyebrows that perched uneasily above his heavily lashed eyes. Those pale blue eyes were sparkling now so maybe it wasn't such bad news after all.

He cleared his throat, and said, "We're living in very strange times, Mica. There are events taking place that we never expected, and we've got to get answers. We can't afford to be surprised by the other side. Our powers are too evenly matched. Any surprises can tip the balance in their favor."

"Evenly matched? I thought you, I mean we, are the good guys. Doesn't that mean we win? I mean, I assumed we were stronger."

Well, there went one of the _truths_ that kept me positive all this time.

He barked a laugh that sent one of those eyebrows jumping toward his forehead. "That would be nice if it were true, but it's not. There's just as much evil as good in the world. We stay ahead of some of the most heinous events by using informants and neutralizing the demons—or humans—before they carry out their plans. It doesn't always work that way, of course. We win some and lose some."

"Win some, lose some?" I repeated, surprised at his nonchalant attitude.

"Hey! Are you okay?"

The room went black as a vision came out of nowhere. Like a conscious dream, I saw a flash of a faded red door in an old rundown warehouse. Fire shot out from the roof as an explosion blew me off my feet. Before I could recover from that, a shocking image of Trevor burning to ash hit me between the eyes.

"No!"

I blinked furiously as the images faded into smoke and the kitchen came back into focus. I pressed my fingers into my forehead against the sudden blinding pain. What was that? Was that a premonition? I've never had premonitions before. Was this another new ability? Maybe it was just some random flash from my ever-evolving brain neurons?

"Mica! Take a deep breath." He crouched beside me, patting my shoulder in sympathy. "What happened just now?"

"I think I had a premonition." My hands started to shake and my eyes pricked with tears. "Not Trevor. Please not Trevor."

"Okay, just breathe. Calm down. What did you see?"

I told him about the vision first and then I told him the whole story from sharing Sean's _saol_ to my new ability to see into people's minds. And I ended with the journey into his mind to remove the wall of flames that kept him from healing. This flash of insight or premonition was another new ability and not one that I wanted. How was this helpful? Was I supposed to use it to help the Primani? I wanted answers.

James was quiet for so long it seemed like he'd slipped into another coma. I was about to call for help when he stiffened. My spidey senses went on high alert. He was different. His irises were backlit with a faint light that captivated me instantly. I couldn't move away even if I wanted to.

He whispered in an odd gravelly voice, "You are not ready."

I strained to hear him. "James? What do you mean? I don't understand you."

He stared at nothing—his eyes focused inward—irises glowing brilliantly. This was clearly not James. My breath caught in my throat.

He leaned across the table, and said in the same broken voice, "Your destiny is still evolving . . . you must be ready!"

Unable to pull my gaze away, I stared into the pure white light until there was nothing but that light. It drew me forward, drew me deeper into its nothingness. All the while he kept whispering, and I found myself answering.

"I'll be ready."

Later that afternoon, my boys came back to the penthouse, half frozen in spite of their natural biology. Snow crusted their hair and boots, and they stomped off slushy piles of it in the foyer. Apparently, New York City was in the middle of a historic cold snap. I wouldn't know since I wasn't allowed to leave the building. Amused, I watched as Killian stripped off his boots and rubbed his toes. He saw my glance and cracked a smile but caught it before it could get carried away.

_Don't worry. Your face won't break_.

He burst out laughing, drawing questioning glances from Sean and Dec.

Sean snapped, "Do you two mind?"

"I'm sorry. It happens automatically now . . . I'm not doing it on purpose."

"Oh, that's fucking awesome!" He shook his head like a dog, pelting me with melted snow. "I'm too damn tired to argue about this. Just stop it."

Before I could retort, Alex started the daily meeting. "Children! It's time to get to work. Save it for later. Sean, what do you have?"

"A whole lot of zip. I tracked down a few promising leads but can't get confirmation because the fucking informant is in the wind." He wrinkled his nose and sniffed his fingers before heaving himself out of the chair to stalk to the kitchen sink. "If I have to spend another day trolling through alleys, I'm going to start killing people"

Dec snickered and bragged, "I had a great day. Maybe people don't like your attitude, dude. You need to be more friendly. I talked to a guy in a pawnshop off of 74th Street after lunch. He mentioned an odd customer that gave him the heebie-jeebies. What do you know? There was some demon trace behind the store." He pulled out his favorite guitar pick and tapped it thoughtfully. "I sent the sample to the lab. We should hear back in a few days."

"You guys have lab people?" I interrupted.

He winked with his usual good humor, and said, "Of course we do, darlin'. How do you think we get anything done?" He broadened his Irish accent, and added, "We're not magic, you know!"

That night I got my wish and was allowed to go out. Several days of inactivity made my muscles stiff, and I was getting stir-crazy. Regardless of the freezing temperatures, I had to get some air and exercise. I pled my case that afternoon, and Alex relented as long as I was with one of the guys. That suited me just fine as I didn't exactly want to roam Manhattan by myself anyway. I flexed a bicep and was reassured I could still handle myself but didn't want to go looking for trouble. All the fight training in the world was no match against a gun. I felt a little vulnerable, so packed my Sig in my purse. I tucked in an extra magazine to even the odds. There, I liked my chances a little better.

The freezing wind caught us by surprise when we rounded a corner onto Broadway. I burrowed my face against Sean's shoulder. Practically dancing, I tugged his arm and dragged him down the street. The sidewalks were still busy even at this time of night. People eddied and flowed around us as the current swept us along. Everyone seemed to be going someplace and stared straight ahead as they made their way along. No one stopped to look at anything along the way. Only tourists gawked at the glass storefronts. Real New Yorkers knew where they were going and forged ahead with that goal in mind. They didn't have time for silly little side trips into liquor stores or pizza joints. Real New Yorkers also did not stop in the middle of the sidewalk to crane their heads at the ridiculously tall buildings that loomed above all real estate in central Manhattan. I learned this last rule the hard way. I was rear-ended by a man in a black leather jacket when I got distracted by the shining blue lights that capped the Empire State Building. We were walking along when the building suddenly came into view. I stopped to stare, and the man slammed into me from behind. He knocked me heavily into Sean who grabbed my elbow to keep me from falling. I started to protest, but the man was gone.

"Freakin' tourist!" the man mumbled as he disappeared into the sea of people.

It was Sean's turn to tow me along. He guided me to the awning of a grocery store and stopped. He leaned his back against the glass window and pulled me against his chest. For all the world could see, we're just a couple of young lovers out enjoying the night. I tilted my face for a lingering kiss, totally forgetting that I was supposed to be undercover. He kissed me back convincingly, but his eyes scanned the opposite street. A couple of bulky guys wearing black skull caps and heavy jackets whistled their approval. Sean gave them a head nod that meant something only guys understand. The two men laughed and kept walking. I flushed scarlet and buried my face in his jacket. He chuckled and patted my butt familiarly.

"Anything?" I asked. The rich smell of marinara sauce was drifting into my sinuses, and I realized we hadn't eaten since lunch. My stomach growled with an alarming demand for pizza.

Sean remained still and continued scanning. He stood loosely with an arm draped casually around me while his eyes searched for our prey. I huddled against him for warmth and tried to mimic his casualness. In contrast to my beloved Secret Agent Man, I was coiled like a spring. I was unused to hunting, and my neck ached from the tension. He scowled slightly and massaged my shoulders. Even through the layers of my clothes, I felt the heat pulse from his hand and gradually the tension eased from my shoulders to coil in a much lower spot.

"Is that better, love?" Warm blue eyes crinkled down at me as he kissed the tip of my red nose with cold lips.

Yep, I was warm pudding now. Let's go to bed. I teased his bottom lip until he gave up and let me kiss him breathless. "I love you. You know that?"

"I _do_ know. You're a lucky woman." He ducked my right hook but grunted when my knee whispered past the family jewels.

Twenty minutes later, I was drooling over the smell of freshly baked pizza and nibbling from the ceramic bowl of olives on our table. The rickety table was covered with an ancient red and white checkered plastic cover, the condiment jars were sticky, and the menus were wrinkled. The neon sign was only halfway lit up. Red letters proclaimed _Pizz_ , and a neon pizza slice was only half filled in. It looked like someone had already eaten part of it. This was a real New York pizza joint!

The guy behind the counter called our number. I snapped a picture of him with my phone. I hadn't been able to tear my eyes away since we got here. He wore his head shaved and had piercings in both eyebrows and his lip. I tried not to stare, but the eyebrows were fascinating me. He had a hook in each brow and a small chain connecting them across the bridge of his nose. Hanging from the chain was a tiny green lizard. The lizard danced back and forth every time he moved. He caught me staring and smiled good-naturedly. He was sporting three gold teeth. Sweet!

The wind had died down by the time we left _Pizz_. I was warm and drowsy from too much chewy crust and bubbly mozzarella. Pizza this good should be illegal. I bumped contentedly against Sean as we made our way down the sidewalk. Tonight's intel gathering was a bust. The streets didn't cough up the informant and no demons rushed forward with their hands up. We were heading back toward the penthouse. Manhattan at night was even more exciting than in the daytime. Neon lights competed with every kind of LED display I could imagine. Buildings were covered with banners and signs. The skyscrapers loomed above as we made our way. The sidewalks were less crowded now, and there were fewer cars on the streets. Small groups of younger men stood together outside of the liquor stores. More than a few showed too much interest in us. Uneasy, I walked a little faster until Sean suddenly stopped to zero in on something just ahead.

"What do you see?" At first, I didn't see anything, but then a shadow detached itself from the side of a building. It slipped around the corner and disappeared.

"Let's go. Stay beside me." Sean broke into a jog.

We cleared the corner and kept straight. I scanned the area for . . . whatever we were following. I didn't see anything but Sean must have. We nearly knocked a homeless man down a flight of stairs when he staggered in front of us. After several blocks of twists and turns, I still didn't see any sign of a person or anything else that casts a shadow. Sean must have been stumped too because he moved more cautiously along the dark, narrow street. Dead end. We were far away from the sounds of the city. The silence was eerie as we considered our options. A cat screamed from a dumpster, and I jumped. Marinara sauce sloshed unpleasantly in my stomach. Friggin' wildlife! Snow piles against the back entrances of the dark brick buildings glowed in the pale moonlight. As I caught my breath, faint sounds of music came from someplace ahead of us.

The thumping of drums was muffled but distinct as we came to the end of the alley. A steep set of concrete steps led down into a set of dark metal storm doors. One of the doors had a tiny window cut into it. The other was chained shut at the top. The metal railing was hanging loose halfway down the steps and didn't look safe. Several sets of shoes had packed the snow into unfriendly ice. One word was spray painted across the brick lintel. In neon green letters, someone had defined this space as, Dump. It seemed to fit.

"I don't know, Sean. This looks sketchy to me . . ." I didn't feel good about this place. It seemed . . . well, seedy. Yes, seedy was the right word. Probably, I was overdressed.

Sean, being Sean, just smiled reassuringly and told me to relax. He didn't sense any demons, and he could always handle any human problems that came up. I was still dragging my feet when I heard her. The woman sang with a raw intensity that sent a shiver down my spine. The words were muffled, but the powerful voice wasn't diminished by brick and concrete.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" I slid most of the way to the bottom of the steps and dusted my butt off while Sean pulled the door open.

Dump was a dark little place that had probably never seen better days. Most of the fluorescent lights were burned out. A tiny strobe light flickered sadly in one corner. It smelled like stale beer and mildew. The music stopped abruptly when we walked in. My ears rang as one last discordant chord fell away. Everyone stared at us, including the band. The band, and it was an actual band, was set up in a little space off to the right. There wasn't room for a proper stage, but someone shoved a handful of rickety tables to the side, and the musicians squeezed into the space. The five musicians gave us the hairy eyeball (or eye _balls_ since there were five of them). Well, mostly they glared at Sean who unconsciously projected violence as he assessed the room. The female singer gave him a long appraising look that made me grind my teeth. Really, wench? I sighed and pulled my purse closer to my hand in case I needed my Sig. She'd have a hard time pulling off those high notes with a bullet through her chest. Yeah. That would fix the problem. I smiled the feral smile I'd seen on Killian's face so many times. The woman suddenly found something else to do.

A peeling, paneled bar with three ancient wooden stools was the centerpiece of the room. The neon beer signs were mostly dead with random letters still glowing like fireflies on the wall. The bartender was a huge hairy man that reminded me of an old biker. He wore a faded blue bandana over his head and had bushy black hair and a long greying beard. Someone had put some small braids in his beard. He had tiny little eyes that were swallowed up in the fatty creases of his face. These piggy eyes watched us now. He didn't look friendly to me, but Sean didn't seem alarmed. He simply returned the appraisal and waited. Easy for him—he's got superpowers. I sidled closer to him and tried to look cynical.

The bartender hollered over to us, "Hey! Don't stand there with the door open. It's cold enough in here."

That was about as much of an invitation as we would probably get. We both relaxed and made our way to a small table that looked sturdy enough to hold a beer. Nervous, I fiddled with my purse strap. There were other people sitting around, and they were looking us over with varying degrees of interest. Sean bent over and kissed me hard on the mouth. Grinning, he turned around and went to the bar. I caught one of the musician's eyes and flushed. He gave me a knowing look and downed a shot of something. He licked his lips and saluted me with the glass. Fuming, I waited for my _hero_ to return. Marking his territory! Why doesn't he just pee on my leg? Ugh. Men!

The band picked up their instruments to play again, and I'm sure the fifteen people listening appreciated it as much as I did. Wow! I was completely blown away. The singers put their hearts into every song, and the drummer and guitar players were every bit as talented as any professional group I'd heard. Occasionally, they'd pause and work on some dance move or re-do a piece of a song that wasn't exactly right. They had too much heart for this dive, but I guess everyone starts somewhere. One of the singers, the guy who gave me the look earlier, directed everything. I wondered how much Red Bull he slammed before the show. Taking his job as front man very seriously, he introduced the band as if they were performing in a packed arena.

Standing on a chair with a mic, he boomed, "How's everyone doing tonight?" This was met with silence. I felt bad for him.

Undaunted, he continued, "We appreciate your hanging out with us! We are RockHard! And we're going to party with you tonight! My name is Aiden, and this is the beautiful and talented Missy Devoux. Come on, people! Let's do a shot!" People clapped and whooped weakly.

Each member of the band bowed and played up their introductions. I was impressed. They had spirit, for sure. Aiden was interesting to watch. He didn't just _sing_ the lyrics; he _performed_ them. What was he doing _here_? He should be on Broadway.

Missy was covering Lady GaGa's song _Bad Romance_. The power in her throaty voice was stunning. How did she get stuck in this dump? I looked over at Sean, and said, "Wow!"

Since he was watching the door the whole time, he missed the visuals, but he couldn't miss the sound. He smiled at my enthusiasm and agreed with me. I was totally into a guitar solo when Sean tensed at the table, and whispered into my ear, "Don't look. We've got company."

"Where?" I swiveled in my chair to see what he was talking about.

Sean spun me back around, hissing, "Are you deaf? Go to the bathroom and wait for me. Try not to shoot anyone unless you're really in trouble." I bristled at his bossy tone but did as he ordered. We'd talk about this later.

The smell of urine slapped me in the face as soon as I opened the door. Gagging, I sucked in my breath. There's no way I could stay in here for more than twenty seconds. That's approximately how long I could hold my breath. Apparently functional plumbing wasn't in the budget, and neither was Lysol. This place was disgusting. A minute later, the woman from the band joined me.

As way of greeting, she said simply, "This place is a hole."

Wow, she was tiny. I was at least six inches taller than her, and I'm not very tall. Despite the freezing weather, she wore a long black skirt with ripped fishnet tights. The skirt was shredded and floated away from her whenever she moved. I was totally checking it out when she was performing. Underneath, she wore a pair of black cowboy boots. The heels on those boots gave her some illusion of height. At the moment, she was finger combing her hair in the mirror while checking me out from the corner of her eye. Seeming to make up her mind about something, she asked casually, "So, is that your man out there?"

Well, yes and no. Oh, he was mine all right. But he wasn't _technically_ a man. I didn't think she'd understand so I just said yes and casually patted my purse. The shape of the gun was barely visible.

Unconcerned, she shrugged a shoulder, and said, "As soon as you came in here, some blond bitch pulled him outside. I thought you might want to know."

Feigning a coolness I didn't feel, I said, "Really? Thanks. By the way, your band is fabulous. What's the name again?"

Her pretty face brightened at the compliment, and she gushed, "RockHard! Our name is RockHard!"

# Chapter 21: Fear of Change

"YOU COULD'VE AT LEAST WARNED ME! How could you do that to me? _That's_ our contact?" I wasn't even trying to keep my voice down. A light came on in a second-floor window next door.

Sean hushed me for the third time and dragged me behind a parked car. "We can talk about this back at the penthouse. Hold onto me." He wrapped both arms around me, and I elbowed him in the gut. I was in no mood for cuddling.

"Let go! I'm done talking to you." I started off down the alley in a huff.

At the same time, a window screeched open above us, and a man stuck his head out, yelling, "Hey! What are you doing with my car?" Accompanying the yelling was the unmistakable sound of someone ratcheting a shot gun.

Things happened quickly then. The sound of the shotgun blast echoed in my ears as Sean grabbed me with both hands and threw me to the ground behind the car. I sucked in my breath as we vanished into thin air. We landed hard on the marble foyer in the penthouse. Sean broke our fall, so I landed sprawled on top of him. He grunted with the impact and clapped a hand hard over my mouth to stop my screaming. I looked wildly around and then calmed down when I saw where we were. He didn't remove his hand though. _Clearly_ , he was unhappy with me. Well, that was too bad. I wasn't happy with him either. With absolutely no regret whatsoever, I bit his hand until he started swearing and let go. I was in the middle of scrambling off of him when boots came running into the room. I looked up into several pairs of amused male eyes. I looked down to see I was straddling Sean's waist with both knees and one hand was pressed against his groin.

"It's not what it looks like!" I blushed to the roots of my hair.

Killian swept his eyes from the top of our heads to the tips of our toes and settled on my hand on Sean's crotch, and asked, "What do you think we think it looks like, exactly?"

I jerked my hand away like it was on fire.

Dec gave Sean a thumbs up. Sean's response was a smirk—the jerk! Jordan and Alex observed from the back of the room and wisely said nothing. Sometimes age is a good thing. Dec came over and offered me a hand. After he pulled me up, Sean got stiffly to his feet. Killian whistled with alarm.

To say I was uncomfortable would be an understatement of gigantic proportions. I was lying on my stomach letting my angry boyfriend pick shotgun pellets out of my butt. He wasn't being very gentle about it either. To make things worse, we had an audience because Alex thought Sean needed supervision. When forced to choose between Killian and Dec as a chaperone, I picked Dec because I thought he would be more sympathetic. The problem was the only one who had any surgical skills at all was Killian. He had some real experience with patching up people on the battlefield. He offered to take out the pellets, but Sean flatly refused. He would do it, and Killian could supervise. So that was the compromise. As a result, my butt cheek was on display, and I was wishing for death. Ouch!

"Dec, she's doing it again," Sean observed without sympathy.

"Sorry, love." Dec was trying hard not to look and sidled up now with averted eyes. He picked up my hand and rubbed it in between his. I knew the drill by now. I took a deep breath and forced myself to relax. Drowsy and warm, I dozed off to the sound of his tuneless humming of an Irish folk song and the scent of fresh leaves.

A few days later, I was up and around but moving stiffly. Luckily, my body was busily healing itself at a pretty fast rate. We were going back out to Dump tonight. To my chagrin, we were stuck with the blonde. She was an informant who worked with the Primani in the city. She'd been sent to track Sean down because she had information on Dagin. She was supposed to meet us at Dump and give us an update.

The taxi dropped us off a few blocks away. Sean fell into soldier-mode and moved with caution. He seemed to be listening for something as he walked. A wave of dread assaulted me as we turned the corner. I held my breath to listen. It was quiet here . . . too quiet . . . unnaturally quiet. I strained to see into the shadows but saw nothing out of the ordinary. My intuition was growing. Maybe I could use it to sense the bad guys. I scrunched my eyes and tried to sense them. A muffled snort from Sean interrupted my concentration.

"Seriously?" He was biting his lip trying not to laugh.

"What?" I looked down my nose with as much haughtiness as I could drum up.

He shook his head and kept moving.

Muffled music greeted us when we reached the stairway to Dump. A small cloud of cigarette smoke wafted out the door as we walked inside. It was crowded tonight. Every table was full, and there were people standing beside the battered wooden bar. I looked around but didn't see any blond bitches so I guess our informant wasn't there yet. RockHard! was in the middle of a song. The bass player was strutting around in a kilt. Huh. That was different. I nibbled on a fingernail while I pondered the mysteries of the Scottish kilt. Several women were watching with hypnotized eyes as the kilt swung back and forth to the rhythm of the song. I grinned around my hand as I remembered the age-old question.

Sean casually leaned against the wall near a subwoofer. I casually leaned against him. This spot gave us the best vantage point for watching the door. He pretended to enjoy the band and occasionally nuzzled me or did something else obviously affectionate in case anyone was looking. As far as anyone knew, we were just two young people out for a good time. Why we chose Dump for it is a mystery someone should have questioned. I envied Sean's ability to multi-task. He was completely focused on the door while idly running one hand up and down my thigh. He was taut and hot against me. He practically vibrated with suppressed energy and it was turning me on. I had asked him about these physical changes at the penthouse today. He shrugged and said it was part of their bodies' preparation for combat. The flight or fight response was stronger in the Primani body so every physical change was magnified.

"Flight response?" I prodded.

He scoffed, "Yeah, but we don't use that one. Primani never run from a fight."

After an hour or so, the door opened and in walked the blonde. She was a tall woman with hair that fell in a straight line to her shoulders. Based on the shadowy roots, I assumed the color wasn't hers. She was wearing tight black jeans with vinyl boots and a fitted black vinyl coat that came to her knees. She looked like a licorice stick.

Sean ran his lips across my ear. Little jolts of electricity trickled from my neck to my toes. I involuntarily arched against him like a cat, my fingers curling into the hair at the nape of his neck. Still nibbling on me, he purred, "Focus, darlin'! It's just for show." He raised a lazy hand, and the blonde moved in our direction. It was time to get to work.

Much, much later that night, I stood on the balcony, mesmerized. The lights of the city sparkled and winked for as far as my eyes could see. It was the witching hour, and I was in a mystical mood. Determined to get a leash on my new psychic abilities, I was secretly experimenting whenever I was alone. Right now, I was attempting to see into the building across from ours. It would be useful if I could sense people or demons this way. I had a theory but needed to gather more data. Pushing away all thoughts, I inhaled slowly, deeply. I visualized my mind as a large airy room that was empty of everything but delicate cream walls. It was my blank canvas. My mind was drifting towards the closest window when warm arms wrapped around me. Images of him filled my entire mental room. With a small sense of satisfaction, I realized I had felt him coming. Not just a _person_ coming, but I knew without doubt, that it was Sean.

"Come here, beautiful." Standing behind me, he fitted me against his seemingly ever-present erection and lifted my hair to expose my neck. As his tongue stroked the tender skin, I rubbed my butt against him, wanting only to be closer, to be naked beside him.

His skin was so hot that I peeled off the blanket I was wrapped in. Underneath I wore only a pair of black yoga pants and a pale silk tank. He swept his tongue along my collarbone and up my throat, and I began to burn . . . literally. Suddenly feverish, my skin prickled with sweat. My head swam oddly. It wasn't just the effect of his kisses. This feeling was new. I turned into his arms. Gripping my face in one hand, he kissed me with an urgency that startled me. My heart was skipping beats. I couldn't seem to breathe right. Lights danced behind my eyes. I tried to pull back, but an odd sense of connection made me stop. I pressed my forehead against his. My heart was still pounding erratically. Without a word, Sean held up our linked hands.

"You're burning up!" He smiled crookedly as he wiped a bead of sweat off the side of my face.

"Something's changed. I feel different." I pulled his hand over and kissed his palm. I rested my chin on our hands and caught my breath.

"You're changing. It's you that's different. It's been happening for a while. You haven't noticed until now?"

"I don't understand."

"That makes two of us!" He pulled me down to sit beside him. "I wish I knew, but I don't. I tried to ask Alex, but he didn't know either. You, love, are uncharted territory for us."

I pondered this for a minute, and asked, "So what now?"

"Well, we watch and see. There's no doubt you're a part of us, Mica. Somehow, you've become connected to us, and I think your destiny is woven into ours . . . and mine, I hope. We don't have all the answers. But I think you're changing physically because of the changes in your brain. You're tapping into new areas . . . it seems reasonable to me."

That sort of made sense. I'm using different parts of my brain to use these new abilities, so maybe that's triggered other changes. Hmmm . . . That doesn't really explain the physical connection I felt to Sean just now . . .

"Do you think I have a halo now?" I perked up at the thought and waited for him to laugh at me.

To my surprise, he didn't laugh at all. Instead, he looked thoughtful. "I don't think so. Angels have halos, love. I think you're something else entirely. I'm stumped."

"Sean . . ." I groped for the right words, twisting my locket on its chain.

I cleared my throat and tried again. "Sean, are you _okay_? I mean, you've been stressed, and sometimes I see you staring into space. You seem worried . . . and sad. Can't I help?"

He was silent for so long I didn't think he was going to answer me. Then he walked over to the edge of the balcony. His back was rigid as he stared into the darkness. The breeze ruffled his hair; the vulnerable skin at the nape of his neck gleamed faintly in the moonlight. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and soothe him, but he wouldn't want it. Eventually, he let out a breath and started to talk.

"I'm afraid. For the first time in my life, I'm afraid. I don't know how to stop feeling this way, and it's making me crazy." He turned with pain clouding his eyes.

"Fear is a healthy reaction to near-death experiences," I observed carefully.

"Not for _us_! Primani fear nothing! Look at who we are! Why would I be afraid?" He rolled his shoulders and pushed away from the wall.

"What's changed then?"

"You! You're the change . . . _we_ are the change. You and I are . . . something I can't even explain to myself. I feel such a connection with you, _to_ you, that I know in my heart is _right_." Instantly, he was in front of me with my hands in his. He held up our joined hands again. "Do you not see it? _We_ are more than just chemistry or even love. _We_ are something extraordinary."

Like a mirage, my fingers shimmered and melted into his as if we were one person. He wiggled our hands. The strange image was gone, and we were just two people holding hands again.

"I've been seeing that more and more here in the city. When we touch . . . sometimes I see it." He scratched absently at the dark stubble on his jaw. "Things are speeding up . . . our connection is growing, your intuition is getting stronger, your body's changing . . . I don't question these things. I _believe_ in predestination. These changes have a purpose, and you and I are meant to be together. I have no doubts about that. But I worry. I'm afraid for you . . . for us."

I listened to his heart beating. "It's the dream, isn't it?"

He pulled away, lips thinning. "I told you I don't dream."

"You did. But that doesn't mean it's true."

The dawn came too early the next morning. I didn't want to get out of bed, but the insistent pounding on my door kept me from going back to sleep. What was wrong now? All right, all right, already! I yanked on a robe and yanked open the door.

"You look like hell. And since I've actually been there, I can say that with conviction."

"And I was just starting to like you too."

Killian bowed at the waist, and said, "If it pleases the princess, we're about to have a meeting with Alex. If you can fit it into your schedule, your presence was requested." The familiar scowl was present, but there was a little gleam in his eye. Was he getting a sense of humor? No one would believe it.

Straightening, he added, "Dani might." He turned and sauntered off.

# Chapter 22: Demons and Drummers

"HOLY SHIT, it's freezing out here!" I bounced on my toes trying to keep the blood from icing up. My earlier excitement about going out was history as I pressed myself against the brick wall of a flower shop. It was closed and the security lights were on. I squinted at Mickey and rubbed my hands together. It was almost time to get moving. Damn, it's cold! Still bouncing, I monitored the opposite corner and tried to spot our targets. I was watching for someone who looked like a dangerous criminal. Alex said they would look suspicious, and I would recognize them. Well, that wasn't too helpful. Based on the general appearance of almost every man in my line of sight, I was surrounded. I peered more closely at two loitering closest to us.

"It's in the eyes. Look at their eyes," Dec advised quietly. He was supposed to be my instructor, and I was glad he was here. I leaned closer until I could feel his body heat. At least I wouldn't freeze to death, though I could lose several important digits.

He was dressed in faded jeans and a heavy jacket, but I knew he didn't really need it. He was trying to blend in. With his California blond hair and perpetual tan, he looked more like a tourist than I did. He was all business tonight though. He was in pure soldier-mode and wasn't joking around at all. I missed his sunny smile. I sighed and checked my watch again.

"It's time," I announced.

He nodded and took my hand. We were meeting the others at Dump but had detoured to check out a lead. As far as I could tell, the lead was a dead end. I didn't see anyone suspicious here. Dec's eyes were constantly moving as he led us down one street and then another. As we rounded the last corner, I pinched his arm and nudged him to the left. A man stood in the shadow of a dumpster. He eased back out of the dim glow of the streetlight. He made no move to bother us, though. We kept walking like we knew where we were going. Just two people hitting the bar on the way home from work . . . Don't mind us.

There were three more men standing in the shadows ahead of us. All of them were positioned so they could see a clear view of the alley and the bar. Sentries? That seemed likely. I forced my face to stay blank. I was starting to get a bad feeling about this. As we walked directly in front of one man, he followed us with dark eyes. I had a sudden urge to run into the bar, slamming the door behind me. The sharp pang of adrenaline made me clench my jaw.

Dec whispered, "Easy, darlin'. We're okay." He helped me down the icy steps into the stuffy warmth of Dump.

Sean and Killian were nowhere to be seen. It was pretty crowded so I did a second walk around to be sure. RockHard! was playing again, and Missy waved at me with a gorgeous smile. The crowd was helping with the chorus of an old Billy Idol song. Singing along too, I made my way to the wall opposite the door and found a clean-ish place to wait. Dec took his time wandering around the room as if he was looking for someone. Eventually he made it to my spot and pretended to watch the band.

"Was it this crowded last week? Do you recognize anyone?"

I considered the random groups of customers and answered, "Yeah, I recognize a lot of them. But the two young guys by the door and the skinhead by the bathroom are new."

The door flew open, and two more men strode inside. Alarm bells clanged in my head. These two were _definitely_ dangerous. They scanned the crowd with the intensity of a couple of predators. The taller of the two had a big crooked nose and deep-set eyes that radiated impatience as he looked around. His thick black hair was slicked back. He reminded me of a mob enforcer from the movies. The shorter one had greasy red hair that he desperately combed across his head. He had mean piggy eyes that coldly assessed the room. Killers? Possibly. The redhead looked like a psychopath too.

The steady beat of drums brought me back to reality, and I smiled up at Dec as Missy spoke for women everywhere with her cover of Adele's _Rolling in the Deep_. Under her spell, I sang along under my breath. I squawked in alarm a few minutes later when something hard pressed against my kidney and a familiar voice hissed in my ear.

"I could have killed you just now." Sean spun me around, dragging me closer so he could lecture without everyone hearing. I was off balance and struggled to get my feet back on the floor. He pinned me with one arm, and I went rigid. Whispering furiously, he read me the riot act. Didn't we _just_ talk about danger? What was I thinking? I needed to focus on why we're here. I needed to be aware of my front and my back; _especially_ my back.

"I came right up to you and you didn't even sense me. Any of these guys could slide a blade in you without anyone seeing a thing. You'd be dead in seconds. You're not here to enjoy the band tonight, sweetheart!" He pressed his nose against mine during this last comment.

Furious, I aimed a knee at his crotch just as Dec intervened. He stopped my leg in mid-swing and plastered a smile on his face.

Between his teeth he asked, "Do you two idiots want to attract any _more_ attention?" After playfully shoving our heads together, he ordered, "Kiss and make up. And you better make it convincing or we're going to have more company than we can handle. Do it!"

To the general audience he shrugged, and said loudly, "My brother's an asshole sometimes."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the skinhead watching us with a gleam in his eye. He nodded and started to get up. Self-preservation overrode my anger, and I threw my arms around Sean's neck and pasted my mouth against his. Startled, he nearly dropped me so I wrapped my legs around his waist. I kissed him with such passion that he finally dragged his mouth away to breathe.

"Good God, woman! Are you trying to kill me?" The pain on his face was funny.

I forced a sappy smile and pressed my cheek against his pounding heart. It was satisfying to feel the effects of my efforts. I hoped he was suffering.

"I hope you enjoyed that. It might be the last one you get for a while." I unwrapped myself and made a show of sliding down his body as I put my feet on the floor.

Killian chose that exact moment to spot us. Even from across the room, I could see the tightening of his mouth and the angry crease between his eyes. Maybe someone could just shoot me now?

"Is it not what I think _this_ time?" he ground out as he glared at the two of us. To my surprise, Sean turned pink. Dec snickered before reminding us that we had work to do.

I scoped out my Mickey Mouse watch again. It was 10:00 pm—surely things should be happening by now? We'd been here for two hours and nothing. I was so tense my neck hurt again. The skinhead kept looking in our direction, and it was making me nervous. Worse, he kept staring at Sean. Something was wrong. I strained to hear the voices around us. I thought I'd heard something . . . There was something . . . strange. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something was different. There was a new tension in the air. That dark sense of foreboding was back and skittering across every one of my nerve endings. I leaned up to tell Sean, but his attention was focused on something I couldn't see.

After a few minutes, he hissed, "Fuck," and uncoiled himself from his chair. "Stay put."

I was left alone again. That strange feeling wouldn't go away, and I wasn't able to make sense of it. Instead, I got more tense and twitchy with nerves. I fondled my locket and chewed on my lip. Thankful for the gun hidden inside, I played with my purse strap.

What if this was all wrong? What if we didn't have the right information? We could be sitting in a trap. We could all get killed. Why can't I _see_ anything? What good were psychic abilities if I couldn't help anyone with them? I wish I knew more. As if on cue, the band started to play my absolutely least favorite song in the entire universe: _Don't Stop Believin'_. I _hate_ this song. Could things get any worse? As Missy belted out the first lines, I rolled my eyes at the ceiling. Really?

Just then a commotion by the bar drew my attention. Several men were arguing with Mob Guy and Red Hair. There were three against two. The music was too loud to hear words, but Mob Guy's expression clearly said, " _Bring it_!"

Skinhead was halfway out of his seat as the two young guys I'd seen earlier hustled over to join Mob Guy. Sean and Killian were on the opposite side, watching the fight start. Like the rest of the men, they kept out of it. Where's Dec? I searched for him but didn't see him. No one else seemed too interested in the fight, and the band kept playing. But the atmosphere changed when another man came through the door. Flanked by a creepy entourage, he projected an air of evil that stopped everyone's conversations. That earlier feeling of dread smashed into me again. Oh, shit.

I hadn't seen him come over, but Dec was now standing in front of me. Like Sean and Killian, he'd switched into full combat mode. Waves of heat flowed from him. I was afraid to look at his eyes. I started to take a step forward.

_Stay back! It's Xarchi._ Killian's warning slammed into my mind.

What about these people?

_Stay out of it._ His eyes locked to mine from across the room, and I backed up again.

The brawl started in earnest then. I tried to stay out of the way and watched from my wall. I wanted to see everything at once, but it was impossible. Mob Guy was punching some little black-haired thug in the face, while Red Hair was thrown over the flimsy bar. The impact shattered the top of the bar, and he fell to the floor in a crash of plywood. People scrambled to get out of the way and several people pushed out the doors. Beer bottles were flying everywhere. One woman ran screaming into the bathroom. The sentries came running in as soon as the screaming people made it outside. There was even more confusion now. One of the thugs pulled out a knife and was stalking Mob Guy. Another guy was getting his butt kicked by the bartender who hit him across the back with a glass beer pitcher and slammed his face into a table. Blood spurted out his nose. _Gross_.

As several more men, and a few women, joined in on both sides, the violence got worse. More knives glinted in the dim light as the bloodlust escalated. Blood splatters made the floor slippery, and a woman fell hard as she tried to run out the door. One of the demons grabbed her and tore off her arm. He grinned evilly at Sean as he tossed her arm aside like trash.

_Oh, my God!_ _Did he just rip that woman's arm off?_ Everything I'd eaten today made a mad dash for an exit and I barely missed my shoes. The carnage continued.

Sean flashed his own feral smile and palmed a silver blade in his right hand. With his left, he gestured for the demon to come closer. The demon's grin widened, and he lunged into Sean. With lightning fast reflexes, Sean sidestepped the lunge and whipped around with the knife extended. With a triumphant snarl, he buried the blade in the demon's back. The high-pitched scream raised every hair on my body. With a final vicious shove, Sean jammed the blade up to its hilt. As the demon arced backwards, he pressed his boot against its back and shoved it off of the blade. The demon twitched for a second before turning to ash.

The band finally stopped playing and the grunts of pain and crash of chairs breaking echoed loudly in the silence. The fighting was spreading across the entire room now, and I had to duck a chair that someone threw. The chair landed in the middle of the drum set with a huge crash. Cymbals went flying. Barely missing Missy's head, another chair tore a hole through one of the big speakers. Missy jumped up and ran over to me. She carried a small knife and palmed it. I loaded the Sig, and we waited, my heart threatening to burst through my chest. Two big bodies tumbled across a table and knocked Aiden and Jimmy, the bass player, onto the ground. That was the last straw.

Aiden swore, "Fuck it, I'm in!" The rest of the guys dove in too.

It was pure chaos. The humans were joyfully trying to kill each other with anything they could get their hands on. The demons were another story altogether. They knew exactly who the Primani were. They weren't afraid but they warily approached Killian and Sean. Judging by their expressions, they knew what they were up against. Xarchi must be the meanest looking demon. His human facade was crumbling with his rage and his real features were showing through. The human skin seemed to melt away. He was covered with bloody red scales and had yellow reptilian eyes. He grinned at the screaming people and several sets of filthy fangs were clearly visible. My knees buckled. Holy shit!

He was the biggest and strongest, so Killian and Sean were both trying to stop him. They stood side by side with silver blades lifted. Dec was facing one of the lesser demons. The demon was trying to hit Dec with an arc of flames, but he kept missing. He didn't realize Dec kept teleporting out of the way. Roaring with frustration, he began shooting fireballs everywhere. As a result, several people were burned, and the carpet was smoldering in one corner. Acrid white smoke started to fill the room.

I looked up to see one of the losers threatening me with a wicked-looking switchblade. I dodged behind a table and shoved it at his stomach. He feinted around to the other side and grabbed my arm. Reaching for anything, I broke a guitar over his face. Letting go of my arm, he fell back. Missy shouted a warning, and I looked up just in time to see him coming at me again. His face was dripping blood from several cuts and probably a broken nose. His eyes were murderous as he stalked me with the knife. I was backed into the corner. I wasn't sure I could kick the knife out of his hands. I looked around wildly for a different weapon, but there was nothing. Resigned, I pointed the Sig and pulled the trigger. Several people stopped to look. Most didn't. My attacker fell to his knees with an expression of surprise on his face. A bloody hand reached down and plucked a guitar pick out of his cheek.

"I can still use that," Jimmy grunted. He jammed it into his pocket and went to help Aiden.

I gasped for some oxygen and looked for Sean. He was still battling Xarchi with Killian. I grimaced as I saw the burns. Both had been hit but were ignoring the pain. They were concentrating fiercely on their prey. They had him backed into a corner. What were they doing though? Xarchi was missing an arm and dripping black fluid all over the floor. He bellowed with rage and threw another fireball. Killian dove to the side and rolled to his feet. His back was to me so I couldn't see what he did next, but he lifted his hand and a blinding light hit Xarchi in the chest. He doubled over with a roar. I strained to get a better view, when suddenly a body sent me flying into a speaker. That hurt—a _lot_. Groaning, I gingerly pulled myself up. The speaker was history. The body that hit me belonged to the bass player. He sat up and shook his head. He was bleeding from a deep gash above one eye, but the rest of his face was okay. He grinned at me, showing a missing front tooth. Oops, _my_ bad, not completely okay.

A lot of the action was dying down now. Most of the human thugs had either killed each other or knocked each other senseless. There were bodies sprawled all over the place. A few people were still fighting though. I took a quick inventory. Dec had evidently destroyed his demon because it was gone and Dec was covered in ash. How did I miss that? He stood ready to jump in if Killian or Sean needed him.

Bleeding heavily from his nose, one of the guitarists swung the last usable pool stick across Skinhead's head with a crack. The stick broke off and flew in two directions, and Skinhead fell over like a tree. Aiden staggered over to the wall and collapsed against it. He'd just ended his fight by slamming the guy's head into the nearest wall. He was breathing hard but still amped up on adrenaline. He gave me an unfocused sort of happy nod. Geez, men were stupid! He sagged to his knees. That's when I saw the blood. His black t-shirt was soaked, and it was dripping down his leg.

"I'm fine," he protested.

"Oh, right." I peeled up the sticky shirt to find a nice big gash in his side. It must've been some knife. He hadn't even felt it. I hoped the other guy looked worse. I dragged my sweater over my head and used my t-shirt as a bandage. It was clean at least.

"Jimmy? Help me!" Maybe he could keep pressure on this for Aiden.

"Mica! Look out!" Dec yelled.

Startled, I looked up just in time to see the third demon getting ready to throw a fireball at me. I threw myself to the side just as it landed. The reek of sulfur hit me, but I wasn't on fire. I took a look at my patient. He wasn't on fire either. Good for him. He had enough problems.

The demon wasn't doing too well, though. While focused on me, he didn't notice the drummer and Missy sneaking up on him. When he released the fireball, the drummer jammed a drumstick into his eye. Enraged, the demon bellowed, the sound echoing above the chaos. His nasty eye was dripping yellow fluid down his face. He spotted Missy just as she jumped up and kicked him in the back with a pretty impressive move. Both feet hit him, and he toppled onto his face. The drumstick went through the back of his head with a crunch. At the same time Missy kicked him, Dec jumped in and hit him with a fine blue light between the eyes. A split second after hitting the floor, the demon exploded in a cloud of ash.

Stunned, no one moved for a minute. Dec took charge. "Let's move! Cops are on the way."

"Dec, what about the band? Everything they own is trashed!" I felt really bad about the guitar I smashed.

"Don't worry about that now. They'll be okay. I'm going to see if there are any survivors. We need intel."

I'd almost forgotten our original mission. We still needed to know what was going on with the demons and who was working with them. I hurried over to talk to what was left of RockHard!

They looked like combat survivors but were happy enough. Nothing like a good brawl to get the blood flowing . . . Aiden was awake but finally lying down. Jimmy was keeping pressure on the bandage. He probably had a broken nose, but the rest of him looked untouched. The drummer had a split lip and both hands were bloodied. I think one of his pinky fingers was broken. It stuck out at a right angle. Missy, like me, didn't get hit in the face tonight. This was a new experience for me since I _always_ get hit in the face. She was limping and had a couple of huge bruises on her arms. She was also liberally dusted with demon ash and it was already starting to burn. She was scratching at it.

"Go wash that shit off before it hurts you."

Finally, I looked around for the Scottish dude. What happened to him? I didn't see him and started to worry.

"Where's kilt guy?" I asked Missy.

With a sigh, she gestured to the right. What on earth?

"Dude, what are you wearing?" He seemed to be wearing a . . . _napkin_? No—a _tablecloth_?

Moving stiffly, he joined the rest of us. I stifled a laugh. Missy snorted. I bit my lip. He _was_ wrapped in a tablecloth, and he cradled something dark in his hand.

"What's that?" I asked.

Instead of answering, he sadly held up the remains of his kilt. There weren't a lot of remains. It was a very small kilt with lots of burned edges.

# Chapter 23: An Assortment of Vows

"ARE YOU SURE this is a good idea? What if they need your help?" I asked for the third time. I was jogging to keep up with Dec.

He didn't slow down. Exasperated, he said, "Sean and Killian have destroyed more demons than I have. They don't need my help with that. Stop worrying. You're messing up my concentration."

The man we were tailing was moving surprisingly fast for someone who recently left a bar brawl. I guess he was knocked out early on and slept through it. He tried to slip out the door during the confusion, but Dec had spotted him just as we were about to leave. I wanted to help Sean, but Dec dragged me with him. So now we were tailing one of the assholes from a block behind. The man hadn't seen us, so he must be an amateur. We weren't that good at hiding.

After several zigzags, I lost track of our direction. We hugged the shadows and followed the man to a bridge. He stopped at the base to catch his breath. His back was to me, but I could clearly see him in the streetlight. He was wearing a Devil's hockey jersey and a red skull cap.

As I caught my breath too, I pointed a thumb at the guy. "He has no taste in hockey teams."

Dec gave me a confused look and hushed me. Apparently, he had no taste in hockey teams either.

The area around the bridge was industrial and rundown. In the harsh winter light, it looked bare and abandoned. There were metal buildings surrounded by chain link fences clustered here and there. Parking lots were empty and rutted with packed snow. There were no trees or anything remotely vegetable in nature. Probably it was _really_ ugly in the daylight. We hung back because there was little cover. Our luck held, though. Our man was more worried about getting into a dilapidated warehouse than making sure he wasn't being followed. As he slipped through a gate, Dec tugged me behind the cab of a tractor-trailer parked in the lot. The warehouse was fabricated metal and the color was washed out in the poor light. It had an abandoned feel to it, except for the security lights discreetly mounted on the corners. Ah. Someone didn't want to be surprised. Where there are lights, there might be cameras. I made myself smaller behind the truck. We crouched and watched—and watched—and watched some more. Nothing moved.

"I hate to say this, but I have to pee. How much longer?"

After checking the time on his cell phone, he said, "We should get back anyway. We're not going in by ourselves, and the others are wondering what's going on." He chuckled softly at my surprised expression as he scooped me into his arms. "Let's take a shortcut."

Our re-entry was much smoother than the last time I'd traveled. Instead of tumbling to the floor in a pile of body parts, we arrived in the living room exactly as we left the warehouse. As before, I didn't notice the movement and was still protesting when I realized we had an audience. I stopped in mid-sentence as Dec set me back on my feet.

Alex dismissed me immediately. Guess I wasn't in the inner circle just yet. I should've been unconscious as soon as I hit the pillow, but I tossed and turned instead. Where were the others? Were they okay? What happened to the demons? Where was Sean? When I did finally fall asleep, I dreamed vividly and came awake with adrenaline surging through me. I lay shaking with the last fuzzy images from the dream fading into the dark. I was left with only a crushing feeling of loss. I tried to hold onto the dream, but it was gone. There was nothing for me to see. It was 5:00 and still very dark outside. Frustrated with the dream, I jumped into a hot shower and got dressed. It was going to be a long day.

I was surprised to find Raphael in the kitchen. He poured me a cup of coffee and sat down. We chatted about the brawl at Dump and the warehouse. He was interested in what I sensed there. Sensed? Hmm. "I didn't sense anything. It was dark, cold . . . I didn't sense anything weird."

"You must have. You may not have mastered your abilities, but they won't go away. They'll get stronger as you mature. Even now your senses will pick up impressions and send them to your brain. It's up to you to weed out the important information from the endless flow of mundane items. We've got nothing special to do right now. Why don't we work on that?"

For the next hour, he patiently grilled me on every minute of last night. I was surprised by how much I absorbed unconsciously. By emptying my mind of the mundane images, things like weather, food smells, car horns, and people's conversations, I was able to retrieve memories relating to what he wanted to know about. I described the faces of the sentries in painstaking detail. I was able to recall that the thugs in the bar spoke with a strange accent. I don't remember noticing that while we were at Dump. After more thought, I recalled the looks of recognition between the Mob Guy and Skinhead. They ignored each other outwardly, but they knew each other. Were they working together? Whose interests did they represent? What did they want from the demons?

Satisfied with my progress, Raphael gave me a fatherly smile and told me to go wake up the others. We had a lot to do today, and it was already 7:00. Feeling lighter somehow, I hopped up and set off to wake up the guys. They were sharing a suite that was beautifully decorated with black and white paintings and deep blue walls. Whoever decorated this place had a thing for blue, but the effect was lovely. I hovered in the doorway, marveling at the three bodies sleeping in front of me.

I hated to wake them. Sean grimaced and flung out an arm. He's dreaming again. I wish I knew what he dreamed about. He was making me crazy with his secrets. He mumbled something I couldn't understand and inhaled sharply. Okay, that's enough. It was time to wake them up. I cleared my throat. Killian sat up instantly—his eyes zeroed in on my face—hand wrapped around the haft of a knife. The sheet fell to his waist. My eyes followed the movement and got stuck. Whoa! Yum! He was all carved muscles and tan skin. He was perfect. With his face and this body . . . No woman would stand a chance if he actually cared enough to be charming.

Dragging my eyes away, I licked my bottom lip, and announced, "Uh, it's time to get up. Raphael wants you in the kitchen."

For once, he didn't comment on my thoughts. Instead, he gave me a sardonic smile and swung his legs off the bed. Flustered, I scuttled over to Sean. He was awake and frowning at me. In fairness, he also looked perfect. He had a beautiful body too, but I was used to it. A naked Killian was a mind-blowing shock.

The morning meeting took a few hours, but everyone thought we were ready by the time we were done. The plan was simple. Later tonight, we would go to the warehouse and three Primani would slip inside to investigate. Killian was leading the operation and went over the plan, again and again, until we knew it by heart. I would play lookout on one end of the parking lot. James would play lookout on the other end of the access road. I was taking my Sig in case I was attacked. Sean and I were going over minor details now. I sat very still as he fitted me with a tiny earpiece.

"This will help us keep in touch with you. We'll be silent most of the time, but if something happens, we'll let you know. Same goes for you. Don't use the mic unless you have an emergency. We don't want to be distracted once we're inside. Got it?" He stepped back to look at his work.

My hair covered the tiny mic. Sean insisted I put on body armor for tonight. It was very lightweight, but I felt ridiculous wearing it. He adjusted it once more and declared me ready. We had a few hours to kill before it was time to go. I needed some quiet time. In my room, I stripped off my clothes and sat cross-legged on the floor to meditate.

I closed my eyes and slowed my breathing. I cleared my mind and thought of my happy place. The tiny clear pool was surrounded by purple orchids and tendrils of mist. Dripping tropical plants hid the pool from prying eyes. I pictured myself standing in the pool with the small waterfall sluicing over my bare shoulders. Relaxing my shoulders, I took another deep breath. The waterfall was warm, and the air was sweet. I was very relaxed now and let my head droop.

A wisp of cool air washed over my wet shoulders. I whipped my head around to see someone else. His look of shock must have mirrored my own. Our eyes met. He approached me slowly as if I would bolt and run away. I trembled but didn't move— _couldn't_ move. The water turned to blood as the air caught fire and whipped around my face. The ticking of a clock echoed in my mind as he cupped my chin in his hand.

"You're so beautiful. I didn't see it before."

And then he kissed me for the first time and the world exploded into chaos.

"Babe? Are you awake?" Sean's voice brought me back to the physical world. He closed the door with a click.

Oh, thank God, that was just a dream! I threw my arms around his neck and attacked him like I would never see him again. I needed to kiss him, needed to feel _him_. I pressed myself against him, desperate to wipe that vision out of my memory. The image taunted me . . . floated inside my mind like a dream, a premonition. What could I have been thinking? Sean was the only one I wanted, and I wanted him right now. Squeezing my eyes shut, I clung to him, spreading kisses down his neck, groping him shamelessly until he shoved me against the wall and pinned my hands over my head. "Slow down. We have time, darlin'."

_Tick-tock_.

The vision danced in my eyes; my heartbeat thundered in my ears as I shook my head. No. We don't have time. "Now! It has to be now!" We might not get another chance.

Murmuring words I didn't understand, he unzipped his jeans and lifted my leg to his waist. In one quick thrust, he was buried deep. Throwing my head back, I dug my nails into his shoulders, crying, "Harder!"

Sweat dripped in my eyes, but I didn't feel the sting. I didn't feel anything but Sean's shoulders flexing under my hands and his cock slamming into me, making me soar before leaving me shattered in his arms.

As I came apart, he buried his face in my neck, rasping, "You're mine, Mica. Mine," before his hips jacked hard one more time as he claimed his release. Leaning against the wall, panting for air, he held me up with an arm. After a few seconds, he whispered raggedly, "Will you look at that?" and raised our hands between us. Our two hands were gone—there was only one—and the wavering mirage flowed over our arms and down our chests to cover every part of us that touched. The pale golden glow of Sean's _saol_ shimmered across my skin, settling into my muscle and bones until it flowed through my veins. We were truly one now.

"I want to say _I love you,_ but that seems like such an understatement now." Sean smiled into my dazed eyes. "Are you still conscious?"

"I think so. I'm not sure this isn't a dream. Did that really just happen?" I was still glowing . . . literally and figuratively. My body was gently pulsing with light, and my locket was like a tiny sun around my neck. The lines of his body were indistinct . . . as if we were still one person. I closed my eyes to clear the fuzziness. When I opened them again, the solid muscles were clearly defined. Something had definitely happened. I felt the click of connection and knew we'd both been changed.

"I'm surprised no one has knocked on the door yet. It's getting late, isn't it?"

He nuzzled my neck. "They're giving us some privacy. Occasionally they're considerate like that."

"Are you telling me everyone knows what we just did?" I blushed to my toes.

"Not exactly. They aren't in here with us, now are they? They can't see through walls, right? But your thoughts aren't exactly your own these days . . . and you _were_ kind of vocal. Maybe I should've gagged you?"

Oh, God! "Killian knows? He read my thoughts? That's sick!" I would have to kill him. That's the only solution. And after that dream . . . Uh-oh! Did he see the dream too?

Sean was scandalized by this idea. "What? No, he wasn't trying to read your thoughts. But your, ah, emotional state was pretty intense, and he would pick up on that even from the other room. I'm sure, well, mostly sure, he wouldn't want to read your mind while we were . . ."

I covered my face and groaned. We'd be needed very soon, and I didn't want to leave this room. I would remember this moment forever. No matter what happened tonight or tomorrow. Time was running out. I was going to lose him. I shoved the niggling feeling of foreboding into the back of my mind.

"Regrets, Mica?" He pried my hands away from my face. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"What? No, never! I don't know what's going on. I don't understand my destiny, and I don't understand _ours_. All I know is that I need you like I need air."

"And I need you. Now, come on, love. We're about to be interrupted."

Awkward doesn't begin to describe the atmosphere in the foyer. We'd gotten dressed for the mission and were in the foyer getting ready to leave. Sean was adjusting my body armor for the second time when Dec came in. Regardless of what he did or didn't know, I turned purple with embarrassment. Dec didn't say anything, but I saw the questions in his eyes. He looked from me to Sean and back again. He knew something was different but didn't ask. His eyes settled on my mouth. He knew! I stared at the floor, hoping to become invisible. Sean ignored him while he adjusted my mic with his usual professional attitude. When he accidently grazed my neck with his knuckles, I felt the effect down to my toes. Dec snorted with amusement.

"What?" I whispered to Sean.

He shook his head with some humor. Dec snorted again just as Killian walked into the room. His expression was colder than I had seen it in years. His disapproval cut like a knife.

His gaze swiveled from me to Sean. "Why is she glowing? What did you do to her?"

I nearly burst into flames right then and there. Mortified, I turned my back, burying my face in my hands. This time, I intentionally sent a plea to him _. Please, Killian, don't be disappointed in us. There's no more time! Please . . . don't cut me out!_ My emotions were already on edge, and I stifled a sob.

And this is what you want from Sean?

No, I want everything from him. But this is a start.

_Still playing with fire, little girl?_ His tone was softer now.

Sean put an arm around me and turned me around again. He whispered, "It'll be okay. Trust me."

He faced the others and made an unequivocal statement.

"I have no secrets from you. We all know there is something between Mica and I that we can't explain. I've tried to deny it—I've tried to fight it—I'm not fighting it anymore." He linked our hands and raised them up for the others to see. As before, the lines between us blurred, shimmered, and disappeared. We were connected again.

Killian and Dec both gaped in surprise. Sean continued, "What does this mean? I don't know yet! But she's changing. Her blood . . . her body temperature . . . her intuition . . . She's becoming more like us every day. Why? There _must_ be a reason for it. There must be a reason for _us!_ "

He cupped my face, kissed me once, before stating boldly, "I love her. She belongs to me, and I belong to her. I will stand by her no matter what happens. I will teach her everything I know to make her strong. And I will destroy anyone who tries to hurt her. So now I ask you, my brothers, what will you do?"

The silence was deafening. We were all in shock. He was completely serious. Alex and Raphael stood in the back of the room frozen in surprise.

Finally, I said softly, "I am yours, and you are mine." I searched his eyes and sealed my vow with a light kiss on his mouth.

Dec came over to us, and vowed formally, "Mica, you're my sister now, and I will always have your back." He kissed my cheek and rested his hand on my head before turning to Sean. "Sean, I swear to you that I will be here for her when you can't be. I'll protect her with my life."

We all looked at Killian. I was holding my breath. He considered Sean's words and the ramifications of our relationship carefully. He seemed to be communicating with Sean, but neither said a word. His blue eyes softened when he glanced at me. He answered Sean's formal challenge with a serious expression.

"I've stood by you against demons and humans. There is no one else I want fighting beside me. You're right. Mica's transformation has purpose that we are only beginning to understand. We must be patient. If this is your choice, I swear to you I will stand by you both. And yes, I will protect her with my life should something happen to you." He bowed slightly.

With a lighter tone, he said, "Oh, and happy birthday, Princess!"

# Chapter 24: A Birthday to Remember

IT WAS SNOWING. Of course, it was snowing! I crouched behind the cab of the abandoned eighteen-wheeler and pulled my collar flat against my neck. The snow was melting in cold little rivers down my back. I would have worn a scarf, but I didn't want to make it too easy for someone to kill me. They'd need to bring their own weapons for that. I had a new reason to stick around a few more years. My face got all warm and happy just thinking about Sean. He'd made a commitment to me in front of everyone. I couldn't be any happier right now. It wasn't a proposal, but it was close.

"I'll strangle you myself if you don't stop daydreaming."

I would've screamed if a big hand wasn't clamped over my mouth. I relaxed when I saw it was Killian. He was scowling at me as usual. It doesn't even faze me anymore.

"Will you _please_ stop sneaking up on me and reading my mind? One of these days, you're going to hear more than you want and you'll regret it!"

"Doubtful." He smiled wolfishly.

He was dressed in all black like the rest of us, but he looked more supernatural than the others. He was a predator, pure and simple. Maybe hunter was really a better word. His face was covered in dark paint, and his eyes burned intensely blue. Yes, _predator_ was definitely the right word. He'd come over to warn me there were trucks coming so I should change my position.

He faded into the dark. I heard the low rumble of a diesel engine and turned my attention to my job as lookout. I whispered into the mic, "We have company. There are thirteen men riding in the back of four pickup trucks, plus four drivers."

Sean responded, "Weapons?"

I peeked around my hiding place. "Looks like automatic weapons . . . maybe AKs? And . . . Wait a minute." I did a double take. "I don't know what that is, but it looks wicked."

" _Calmly_ describe it for us. Take your time but hurry up."

I rolled my eyes. "Okay, it's really long like a rocket launcher. It's got a smaller barrel and some kind of weird sight on it. It's shiny looking . . . some kind of metal. Weird. Some of the men are guarding it, and the others are heading into the door. Oh, and there are some barrels in the back of one of the trucks. They're unloading them."

"Good. Stay out of sight and stay alert."

I looked at my watch. According to the plan, Killian and Sean would go into the warehouse from the east side. Dec would go inside from the north. They had already disabled the security lights and cameras. They were going to sneak inside to see what was going on. If they could capture a hostage, they'd do that and teleport out with him.

A quiet voice came through my earpiece. "I'm in." Dec was inside. Sean called in a minute later.

I scanned the area around my end of the property. Everything was quiet. No headlights on the road, no strange sounds. Nothing moved in the shadows. The wind shifted suddenly. Ewww! A strong smell hit me in the face. It was horrible. I gagged and tried to hold my breath.

"James?" I whispered.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Do you smell that weird smell? The wind's blowing it towards me now."

He paused, and said, "Yeah, some kind of chemical. Don't inhale."

Was he serious? The wind shifted again, and I started to cough, my eyes burning and watering.

"You okay?" James coughed in my ear.

_Definitely not okay._ My eyes and nose were running like a hose, and I was struggling to breathe. I didn't want to distract the guys inside so I turned off the mic. A few minutes later, James made his way over to check on me. He was struggling not to cough as he pulled me down in the snow behind the trailer.

"Listen. It's some kind of chemical." He stopped to hack up a lung before continuing. "Close your eyes and slow down your breathing. Take shallow, slow breaths."

He dug up a handful of clean snow from deep under the pile and scrubbed my face with it. He let it melt into my eyes and flushed them until they stopped burning. Then he did his own. By this time, we were still coughing but not as hard. I had a feeling this was going to hurt later.

The sound of gunshots surprised us, just as we were catching our breaths. James shoved me onto my face and crouched with his gun ready to fire. The sounds came from inside the warehouse. Oh crap! Shooting wasn't in the plan for tonight! Drawing my Sig, I scooted around to watch the door. There were more gunshots, and then a lot of yelling.

"James! Get on the door and grab anyone who runs out. Dec, get out of there!" Killian was barking orders into my earpiece. Where was Sean?

More yelling and gunshots.

Finally, I heard Sean demand, "What the hell is that?"

Killian yelled, "Out _NOW_!"

A loud roar came from the far end of the warehouse, and men began running out of the front door. James vanished and reappeared next to the door. He snatched the next two men who ran out and vanished. I blinked. Wow, so that's what it looks like. Before I could get up and move, a small flash of movement near the building caught my eye. What was that? I pressed myself into the shadows and used my night sight to scan the area.

Oh yay. We have company. As men came running out of the burning warehouse, another observer hid in the shadows, watching the chaos. Who was this guy? Cop? The fire got louder and small explosions were going off inside the building. The acrid smoke from burning chemicals was drifting across the parking lot. I put my sleeve against my nose and tried not to breathe. Frantic now, I chewed on my lip. Where were they? _Come on. Come on!_

I switched on my mic and shouted for Sean, Killian, and Dec. No one responded. Shit. James was gone too. Double shit. Then I saw a dark figure on the roof and almost cried with relief. He was crouched over to jump off the roof when the entire roof exploded in an immense fireball. Whoosh! The night sky lit up like a nuclear explosion. The force of the blast slammed me backwards into the dumpster. The last thing I saw was the tractor trailer flying towards me before I crumbled to the snow.

Loud yelling jarred me awake. "Raphael? Damn it, hurry up!"

Sean. Thank God. He was safe.

I opened my eyes a tiny slit and breathed with relief. We were in the penthouse again. I closed my eyes against the harsh lights. Sean was racing to strip off my boots and jacket.

While he worked, he said, "You're gonna be okay. It's all right. You just rest. Raphael will be here, and he'll make you feel better."

Who was he trying to convince? Me or himself?

My chest was burning. My side hurt when I took a breath. Probably I broke another rib. Crap. I hadn't heard other voices. Where was Dec and Killian? Sean looked horrible. He was covered in soot, and his skin was lobster red. His eyebrows were singed. Even the whites of his eyes were red. He had a gash on the side of his head that was bleeding steadily down his cheek. The explosion . . .

"I'm fine. It's just a broken rib . . . Go take a shower. You're a mess," I ordered with a weak smile.

"Are you fucking crazy? I'm not leaving you." He bent down and kissed my forehead. The smell of the fire was overwhelming. I wrinkled my nose which started a new coughing fit. Sean was alarmed when I coughed up red mucus. I guess I looked worse than he did.

Alex and Jordan finally came home and were appalled by our appearance. Jordan took charge and efficiently helped Sean undress me and sit me in the shower. It was like having two nurses—one clean and one filthy. After I was chemical-free and covered by a blanket, Alex insisted that Sean take a shower to wash off any chemicals. Sean sprinted to the shower and was back in two minutes flat. He was squeaky clean except for the fresh blood that was running down his face again. Jordan sighed and handed Sean a towel.

Where was Dec? Where was Killian? The op went horribly wrong. Maybe they were blown up? Were they dead inside the warehouse?

"Don't cry, baby." He dabbed at my eyes with a tissue. "I hate not being able to help you!"

I was coughing again but managed to croak, "Dec? Killian?"

He wouldn't answer me.

A few minutes later, Raphael finally showed. He came with Killian. There was no sign of Dec. Killian was still hyper-alert, and the waves of heat coming off of his body were noticeable from across the room. He was coiled tightly as he reported to Alex. Alex calmly listened to the details, and then gave out some new orders. He sent Killian after James. He needed help interrogating the two men he snatched. Depending on their origin, Killian was to use his judgment to dispose of them. Yikes! What did that mean, exactly? His eyes gleamed with way too much eagerness. Those men were toast.

"Killian, wait!" I rasped as he was getting ready to leave again.

Surprisingly, he actually came over and sat down on the side of the bed. His eyes softened as he picked up my hand. I tried to smile but broke into another fit of coughing that left me wheezing. He squeezed my fingers and hollered for Raphael.

"Where's Dec? Tell me."

He looked angry again, but he kept his voice soft when he answered. "I don't know. He's gone."

"What do you mean _gone_? How does a Primani disappear? Can't you sense him or something?"

He jerked his head in frustration. "I can't sense him. I saw him in the warehouse right before the whole place went up, but I haven't seen him since."

My face crumpled, and he searched around for help. This was way out of his comfort zone; Killian wasn't a sensitive guy on the best of days. He killed things—he didn't give comfort—that wasn't in his job description. Sean displaced him from my side. He was much better at comfort. I guess he's had more practice.

It was lunchtime when I woke up the next time. I was lying on my bed with Sean. He was asleep and looked healthy again. I was so out of it last night that I didn't remember Raphael healing me or going to bed. I took an experimental breath and didn't cough. My eyes weren't burning anymore either. I'll have to learn to heal myself if I'm going to keep hanging around these guys. What will happen to me if Raphael isn't around?

Sean rolled over and clutched me like a favorite toy. He sighed sleepily and nuzzled my shoulder with his scruffy chin. I relaxed into sleep until a light tap on the door woke me. I started to get up, but Sean tightened his arms around me. "What is it?"

"Shh, just wait. Look," he whispered.

Pulsing gently, a faint golden haze surrounded our entwined bodies. "Did you do that?"

He smiled against my back. "Not on purpose. I woke up, and it was there. I guess you get your halo after all." He inhaled deeply, and the illumination faded until it disappeared altogether.

The aroma of freshly-baked croissants teased my nose as we entered the kitchen. Jordan looked immensely pleased with himself as he ushered me to a chair. He'd put out a big spread today. There were several baskets of bagels and muffins scattered on the table. There were bowls of scrambled eggs, bacon, and fresh fruit too. Pretty glass pitchers sparkled with juice and a bottle of champagne was chilling in a silver bucket. The table was set with sparkling crystal glasses and polished silverware. There was even a beautiful vase overflowing with cream and purple tulips. They were beautiful, and I immediately buried my nose in them. When I turned around, I had an audience. Alex, Jordan, and Sean stood near the bar with identical satisfied grins on their faces.

"What's going on?" I smiled back automatically.

"It's not every day a girl turns nineteen, now is it, darlin'?" Sean played up his brogue.

"This is for me? It's all so beautiful! Thank you, Jordan. I know you went to a lot of trouble, but how can we celebrate without Dec?" My voice cracked when I said his name.

Sean's smile fairly split his face. A definitely unharmed Dec strolled into the room. With a happy, girly cry, I flew into his arms. He swung me around until I was too dizzy to cry. Setting me down, he hugged me until the spinning stopped.

Flashing all dimples, he presented me with a small box. "For you, sweetheart."

I opened it to find an exquisite porcelain replica of Domino. She was beautiful. It was the perfect gift. I basked in the love shining on the faces surrounding me and smiled like a big dope. No— _they_ were the perfect gifts.

# Chapter 25: You Can't Go Home Again

THE ADIRONDACKS WERE BLANKETED in fresh snow as we drove north. I gazed out the window as the scenery flew past. Purplish clouds roiled above, and a brisk wind buffeted the car, causing us to swerve in the lane. I squeezed the arm rest, drawing an amused eye roll from Sean. I shrugged and let go. After everything we'd been through, I knew we weren't going to die in a car wreck today. We would be back in Plattsburgh soon. I was getting more and more tense the closer we got. My dad was going to kill me. I was pretty sure of that. There was only one solution.

"I have to move out."

Sean raised an eyebrow. "Okay. I'll bite. Why do you have to move out?"

"He's going to kill me; and probably, you too. Or maybe he'll just kill you and leave me alive to suffer."

He disagreed. "He's not going to kill either of us. We'll just have a talk with him, and he'll understand everything. It'll be fine, babe. Don't worry about it." He squeezed my leg and let his palm rest there.

My leg tingled and heat spread up my thigh until it reached my face. Whew! Was it getting hot in here? I fanned myself and unbuttoned my sweater. Suddenly I was _way_ too hot. It was like a furnace in here! When I peeled off my sweater, Sean nearly drove off the road.

Dec angled his shoulders between the console, asking, "Dude, what are you doing up here?" Bursting into hysterical laughter, he finally wheezed, "No way!"

What was the matter with him? Nonplussed, I turned towards Sean and his mouth dropped open. He whipped the car onto the shoulder and threw it into _Park_. "Out!"

"What? What's the matter with you two? I'm not getting out!"

Gritting his teeth, he pulled the vanity mirror down and pointed at it. Geez, now what? I looked into the mirror and flinched. Oh crap. I was glowing again. Resigned, I got out and sat in the snow until my body temperature went down. Sean and Dec alternated between pacing and snickering. Well, mostly Sean paced and Dec fizzed with inappropriate amusement. I couldn't decide if this was funny or not. I was going to have to get this under control though. I was pretty sure I couldn't explain this to my father.

By the time we pulled up to my parents' house, we had our story straight. I'd hoped to slink off to my apartment without notice, but my dad opened the front door as soon as we parked the car. He did _not_ look happy to see me. Janet was just as unhappy. I guess they didn't appreciate the note I'd left them. I sighed and crossed my fingers. I hoped this plan worked. I gave a jaunty little wave and pretended to get something out of the trunk. Dec and Sean approached my parents with their most innocent expressions. Obviously furious, Dad started to say something, but Dec took his hand. After several minutes of conversation with Dec, it was done. Janet and Dad were smiling and waving me inside. They wanted to hear all about our trip. I shook my head in amazement. How does he do that? It's a good thing he uses his powers for good . . .

Later that night, I lay on my bed with my stereo playing softly. Domino was still mad and wouldn't tolerate my attempts to snuggle. She was curled at the foot of the bed with her back to me. Sean said she'd come around. I guess he'd know. Right now, I doubted it, the ungrateful mutt. I decided to ignore her to stare across the room some more. I sent Sean away so I could think. I had to get some of my jangled thoughts in order. A lot had happened, and we still had a lot to do. I had more questions than answers, and knew, without a doubt, there would be more tragedy and pain. I felt it. I couldn't _see_ it yet, but it was coming.

The question was—why?

Before we left the safe house this morning, Raphael asked to talk to me privately. With lips pursed thoughtfully, he'd said, "I believe I owe you an apology, Mica."

"I don't understand. What do you have to be sorry for?"

He enfolded my hand between his and traced the web of veins with the pad of his thumb. The gentle motion lulled me into a drowsy stupor, but his soothing voice came through loud and clear. "For many things to come, but I'm speaking specifically of the precipice you find yourself on now. The Primani were only to steer you back to your true path—not _alter_ that path. Sean's attachment to you is unusual, child. And as with anything rare, there are unanticipated events that change the natural order of things. The accidental transfer of power has far reaching consequences that you will surely find painful. For better or worse, your mortal life has been forever changed."

_Forever changed_.

Those two softly spoken words hung between us while my mind raced to read between the lines. What wasn't he saying? His somber tone hinted at much more than the simple abilities I was beginning to display. "There's more, isn't there? What are you afraid of, Raphael?" Needing the comfort of physical connection, I groped for his fingers and held them tightly.

With fathomless eyes and kind smile, he nodded in approval. "Your perception continues to grow." He sighed softly and blew my mind. "We cannot undo what's happened. Your psychic power will expand exponentially over the next year. I've seen it. You won't be able to slip into your old life; the life you were to lead is gone. This is what I must apologize for. I'm afraid Sean's actions have altered you beyond what we originally thought."

"Are you saying I'm going to become some kind of freak? A _dangerous_ freak?" My voice rose a couple of octaves as fear and confusion warred with wonder.

Patting my hand, he soothed, "Your heart is soft, Mica. You will do great things for the good of mankind. I'm simply saying your powers will set you apart from the humans you know. It will likely be difficult to remain in that world without our help."

I didn't know what to say. Instead of responding, I lowered my head and tried to wrap my brain around this conversation. _Good of mankind_? That sounded promising. But how? What did he know that he wasn't saying?

Raphael finally interrupted my thoughts. "I realize this is a lot to comprehend, but it is important that you know the truth so you can make a decision. I want to make you an offer. When you return to Plattsburgh, you can choose to pick up your life where we interrupted it. Go back to college. Try to live a normal human life. Deny your gifts. Keep our secret. This is option A."

"What's option B?"

"Work with my Primani team. Let them help you unlock your full potential. See where it takes you. I suspect your strength and intelligence will be assets to the ops unit once you've been trained."

"Like a job?"

He chuckled warmly at the first thought that popped into my head. _A job?_ With a bunch of supernatural demon hunters and the angels they hang out with? What kind of stupid question is that? I'm an idiot.

"More of a calling than a job. But I'm afraid your destiny isn't written in stone, little one. It's still evolving, as are you. You continue to surprise us with new abilities, and these will continue to shape your destiny. You may find yourself worlds away from the life you've been planning."

"What are you saying, Raphael? I'm not going to stay with them? With Sean?" I wouldn't accept that. I wasn't leaving him. Ever.

He wagged his head. "No, child. That's not what I'm saying at all. Your true destiny is forged by your abilities and how you choose to use them. It comes down to choices. I'm saying you must harness these abilities _now_. Work to understand and sharpen them. Use your _strengths_ to become stronger. Use your _wisdom_ to become wiser. Use your _sight_ to see farther."

His voice filled with regret as he warned, "You will be challenged, and you will be hurt. There is great pain on your path, Mica."

Somehow that didn't surprise me. "Will I ever learn to heal myself?" I was getting tired of being broken by men, and now I had to worry about demons.

He considered my question for a moment before placing his palm against my cheek. There was no familiar tingling or supernatural warmth. Instead, I felt only rough callouses brushing my soft skin. His eyes were slightly unfocused as he gazed into mine.

"Relax. I'm going to give you a special gift." With eyes closed, he spoke firmly in a language I didn't understand. When he finished, he kissed my forehead and leaned back. "Consider my offer carefully, but do not wait too long. The clock is ticking."

And then he was gone.

So now I sat and puzzled over his words. More pain in my future didn't sound fabulous, but I wasn't surprised. My transformation had to be related to the Primani and they hunted demons. It made sense I would be involved with demons too, and they would be dangerous. Satan's minions and all that jazz. I pictured Dai Li's gleaming red eyes and swallowed uneasily. Yeah. Dangerous for sure. Was I strong enough to survive this new life I'd been handed?

A sudden gust of wind pushed a tree branch against the roof and startled the heck out of me. With a nervous titter, I took two steps towards the refrigerator when a loud clap of thunder rattled the windows, and the lights flickered.

Barking furiously, Domino bolted to her feet. Another blinding flash and thunder shook the house so hard I lost my balance and fell hard against the desk. The music died, the room plunged into darkness, and Domino went crazy. She planted herself against my shins, barking viciously at an invisible threat. The hair on the back of my neck stood up. I wasn't alone.

The stench of burnt earth filled the room. Watching me with something like curiosity on his face, he waited near the door. He kept his human mask in place for now, but the gleaming yellow eyes gave him away. The demon seemed surprised to see me though and hesitated, tilting his head this way and that to study me more closely. That was interesting.

"What do you want?"

"Are _you_ the one the Primani protect?" he asked tentatively. His eyes darted all over the room. He curled his lip at Domino who was still snarling like a mad dog. Oddly, he didn't try to go around her.

"Who's asking? Dec?" I challenged loudly. If ever I needed back up, now was the time.

He didn't expect that. His yellow eyes narrowed. "Dec? Stupid human bitch! Just shut up and listen. I'm here to deliver a message for the Primani." He twitched a finger, and Domino lunged. He actually backed up a step. "Tell them Dagin says the truce is over."

"What truce is he talking about? Who's this Dagin? Why did he send you?" I spit out random questions to stall him. I was hoping my protectors would miraculously show up before I got barbequed. It was working too—until the door suddenly opened, and Trevor barged into the room with a wide grin splitting his face.

"Hey, Mica—"

Surprised, the demon whirled around and threw a fireball at this new threat.

Two things happened then. Domino launched herself between the fireball and Trevor and they vanished. The demon exploded into a cloud of smoke.

"Trevor!" Hoping they'd be on the grounds, I raced outside, calling their names. Another flash raced across the stormy sky. Blinded, I ran headlong into Dec and Sean who appeared out of nowhere. Both grabbed me to keep me from falling, and I slapped at their hands.

"Let go of me! I have to find them! They're gone! Trevor! Domino!"

"What happened?" Sean grabbed my shoulders, forcing me to calm down.

They arrived expecting a fight, and Dec's eyes were intense as he scanned the yard. "There they are!" He yelled before sprinting towards a huge snowdrift near the back of the property.

"Trevor!" Oh no! I was completely undone. There, lying in a large puddle of melted snow, were my little brother and my dog. Both were still smoking. How did they get out here? I stared for a minute and then I knew what to do. I knew exactly what to do!

"Mica! We need to call an ambulance." Sean's urgent tone only spurred me forward.

"No, we don't! I know what to do. Let go of me!"

He lifted a hand towards the carnage before dragging it through his hair. "I don't think—"

"No! Listen to me! Raphael gave me a _gift_." I let the words sink in while sprinting to Trevor's side.

He wasn't burned to ash like my vision had shown, but he was burned pretty badly. Biting my lip, I forced back nausea. The poor kid looked terrible. Most of his bright red hair was singed to the scalp, and his freckled face was seared like a steak. Thank God he was unconscious. Okay, I can do this.

"Raphael, if you're listening, make sure I do it right."

Settling beside him, I rested my fingertips on his cheekbones and closed my eyes. Carefully, haltingly, I repeated Raphael's strange words. Nothing happened so I tried it again. This time I added something else. I called to the psychic energy inside of me, urging it to flow through my fingers into Trevor's body. Slowly, but surely, it trickled through my blood, intensity building with every second that passed until my hands vibrated with the force of it. Gritting my teeth through the pain, I braced them until Trevor began to heal. Beginning with his face, the burns vanished, and his skin returned to normal. I pulled my hands back and shook them out to release the excess pressure.

Trevor blinked sleepily. "What happened?"

I hugged him quickly and turned to Dec who was squatting beside us. "Can you fix his memory?"

He nodded, and said, "I'm all over it. Nice work."

A few feet away, Sean sat with Domino cradled in his arms. His eyes were bleak. When I knelt beside her, she wagged her tail and tried to raise her head, only to whimper softly before closing her eyes in pain.

"Be still, baby girl. You're going to be okay." I hummed a lullaby to settle both of us down. It's funny how time seems to stand still during the worst moments of life. Instead of panicking, I was calm. Freakishly so. Clearly this wasn't all my doing, but I wasn't going to argue. I'd take all the help I could get and for as long as I needed it. _Thanks, Raphael_.

Domino laid her chin on Sean's forearm and sighed. This better work on dogs . . . I took her scorched little face in my hands and began again. I took a deep breath, gathered my energy, and let it flow from my fingertips. My hands vibrated and tingled with the force of the current, but Domino didn't respond. Digging deeper, I pushed more healing energy into her. My bones felt like they were combusting, and still she didn't respond. She cried out and licked at my hands.

"Come on! Come on! Why isn't this working?" What was I missing here? What else could I do? Damn it! I'm not losing my dog. It's _not_ going to happen!

Sean laced his fingers with mine. "Let me help."

He combined his much stronger _saol_ with mine and repeated the words. The power radiating from our joined hands illuminated his face as he concentrated. A tear shimmered as it slowly rolled down his cheek. Again and again, we repeated the words until Domino began to heal. The brave demon dog had taken the brunt of the fireball. After what felt like eternity, she was finally healed. Shaking her head groggily, she struggled to her feet and wagged her tail. I threw my arms around her and burst into tears. It was a miracle.

Sean found me a bit later and approached with caution. I was standing with my back against the wall staring at the place where Trevor and Domino had landed. I had so many questions, but I just wanted to sleep—I was afraid to sleep because I would dream—so I just stood there instead. The scenes from earlier replayed in my memory as I relived every second. Sensing my tension, he kneaded my shoulders until I relaxed against him. The silence stretched.

As the sun started to rise, I turned to him, and said, "I'm taking option B."

"I'll help you pack."

My dad was profoundly unhappy with my decision to move in with Sean. As far as he was concerned, we were too young for such a big step. I embellished the circumstances, telling him we were in love and getting married. It wasn't a complete lie. We _were_ in love. But so far, there'd been no talk of marriage. One day at a time, I guess. Technically, I was an adult and could do what I wanted, but I asked for his understanding. He didn't understand. I hoped someday he would. I was throwing my things into garbage bags, AKA packing, when Sean drove up. We were loading my stuff when Ricki walked over.

"So you're leaving again?" she observed without a smile.

Unsure of her mood, I said, "I'm moving in with Sean."

Her eyebrows went up. "No shit?"

I couldn't help it; I cracked a smile. She smiled too. Then we were hugging each other and laughing like old times.

Despite the hug, she was still unhappy with me. Her lips thinned again, and she said, "I'm still mad at you. How could you disappear without a word? With _him_ of all people? After what happened to you, you'd think you'd be more careful. I didn't think I'd ever see you again."

Guilty. Guilty. Guilty.

"I know. I'm a lame friend. We got so wrapped up in the idea of a road trip that I forgot to call. Dude, it was a blast! I love New York City!"

Clearly, I'm a terrible actress. She didn't buy my story at all.

"Cut the shit, girlfriend. You two didn't take a vacay. What's really going on with you?"

I threw a beseeching glance at the cause of all this drama. He gave me a slight shake of the head. Okay, so she wasn't allowed to know the truth. When I faced Ricki again, she was glaring daggers at him. If looks could kill . . . He met her eyes and held them. Without breaking eye contact, he offered me his hand, and I started to lean into him, and then froze awkwardly in mid-lean. What if I started glowing again? I couldn't explain that to her so I flinched away from his hand.

Sean said, "Come on, Mica, we better get moving. It's going to snow again."

He was right. The sky was threatening to drop huge amounts of the white stuff.

"I really have to go, but I'll call you. I promise."

"Whatever." She pivoted and stalked back to her house without a backwards glance.

As we drove away, I couldn't help feeling it was not a moment too soon.

# Chapter 26: All Kinds of Teachers

OUR ARRIVAL AT THE FARMHOUSE was anticlimactic. I expected Killian to be upset about my decision, but he wasn't. Instead, he helped carry my bags into the bedroom. As I hung up my clothes, he lounged in a chair, talking with Sean. He ignored me completely as they strategized upcoming missions. I'd never seen him actually relax before. I peeked at him from the corner of my eye. This was a side of him that I didn't believe existed. If he wasn't careful, he might break into a genuine smile and give me a heart attack.

He tilted his head and produced a sudden, arresting smile. It transformed his face completely. Breathtaking. Wow! To my horror, my mouth dropped open and I might have gasped aloud. He threw back his head, bursting into genuine laughter. I put my hand over my heart and pretended to die. He laughed even harder and Sean joined in. Overcome with giggles, I flopped onto the bed and laughed until my sides hurt. It felt so amazing to laugh again. I guess all of us needed the release because we lay there still chuckling minutes later when Dec popped in.

Winter finally gave up its grip and spring returned with heat and humidity. The basement sparring room was so warm I had sweat running into my eyes. Grabbing the tail of my shirt, I blotted my face for the fourth time in an hour.

"You don't have time for that! Do you think the bad guy's going to let you wipe your eyes? _NO!_ " Sean's voice rang off the rafters. "Gut it out!"

" _Fine!_ "

I staggered over for another round of Krav Maga. Today we were drilling on how to avoid a knife. I didn't have time to react when he lunged and pinned me to the ground. The plastic knife slit my throat before I put up my hands.

Red faced, he straddled me and slammed the knife to the mat. "You're dead!"

He hauled me to my feet, demanding harshly, "Again! This time, you need to react—at least _do_ something!"

I ground my teeth together. _Oh, so he wants a reaction?_

Jaw set in concentration, he came at me with the knife lowered, and I dodged to the side just as the blade would have stabbed me. He swung again, and I pushed his arm to one side and kneed him in the balls as hard as I could. He dropped like a rock. Bull's eye!

"How's that for a reaction?" After kicking the knife away, I pressed my heel into his wrist for good measure. Just enough pressure to know I was there . . . I stood there happily gloating for a minute until I realized he wasn't making any noise at all.

"Sean?"

"Come on, stop milking it! You're not that hurt!"

Silence. I couldn't see his face because it was turned away from me. Was he breathing? Uncertain, I knelt down to check on him. As soon as I bent over, he grabbed me by both arms and flung me over his body, and then rolled on top of me, pinning me to the mat. He shoved another plastic knife to my throat. His cheek slid against mine as he pressed the knife a wee bit harder to make his point. Sweat dripped into my eyes and burned like fire. His breathing was harsh while mine was non-existent. He'd knocked the wind out of me. My mouth opened and closed like a beached fish.

Must. Have. Oxygen.

"Can't. Breathe!" I mouthed.

"What the hell, dude? Get off her, you tool. Are you trying to really kill her?" Dec interrupted my death scene.

"Well, fuck." Sean rolled off in one fluid motion and turned away in a huff.

Squatting by my head, my handsome rescuer offered to give me mouth-to-mouth and made kissing noises in my ear until I choked on a laugh and sucked in some oxygen. Pissed off and wheezing, I leaned up on my elbows, glaring twin holes into Sean's back.

"So you want to play rough, do you?" I growled under my breath before launching myself against his legs. He toppled like a tree, and I was on him like a vine. Before he could throw me off, I skewered him like a shish kebab. "Oh, you are so dead!" To add insult to injury, I aimed a fake kick at his head before dancing my way over to Dec who gave me a high five and a down low.

"I heard you took down your trainer today, Princess," Killian commented over dinner that night.

"He had it coming."

"No doubt."

"She was a rock star!" Dec added loyally.

My cheeks warmed with pleasure. "Aw, thanks, Dec."

Sean grumbled and shoved his chair backwards with one sharp motion. He was in a crappy mood. He was still dreaming, and the dreams were getting more intense. Strangely, he still wouldn't admit to the nightmares. Lack of sleep was taking a toll on him, though. His eyes were ringed with purple shadows; his cheekbones white with strain. He was exhausted by the end of the day but still pushed himself to teach me. His misery colored our training, so I wasn't able to focus on anything but the pain I sensed in his heart. Today had been an exception only because I let my ego get the better of me when he kept kicking my ass. I wanted to help but he had shut me out. Time seemed to be holding its breath, but my gut told me that was about to change.

He was sitting on the kitchen counter with eyes closed and neck arched in a tired stretch. A soft groan sounded deep in his chest. He was dead on his feet.

"Come to bed with me?" I tugged at his hand, pulling him along the hallway and into our room.

The silence was deafening as we brushed our teeth and stripped off our clothes. Standing beside him in the tiny bathroom, I ached to touch him but he was distant again, and I hesitated. He hadn't said a word since our sparring match. What was going on here? Was he really mad at me? It wasn't like him to be this quiet. I'd rather hear a snarky comment—or even an angry insult—than this heavy silence.

We lay on the bed, each lost in our thoughts, the dark room anything but restful. I watched shadows play across the ceiling and shuddered as a familiar sense of foreboding skittered through my mind. _Tick tock_. Time was running out.

Unable to resist the instinct to comfort, I curled against his back, pressing my cheek to the hard planes of muscle and kissing the smooth skin between his shoulder blades. "I'm sorry about today. Forgive me?"

Turning to face me, his mouth twisted in a mocking smile as he absently stroked his thumb across my cheekbones. My pulse had been puttering along, but his sensual touch kicked it into higher gear. My breath hitched as he brushed his lips over the path his fingers had made. "Forgive you? Why? You did exactly what you should do. I think the real question is, do you forgive me? I got carried away. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"There's nothing to forgive. You're just trying to make me stronger. I get it. You worry about me, but you shouldn't. I'll be okay." My lips curled into a sexy grin, and I trailed my fingertips over his shoulder to linger on one of his flat brown nipples. Flicking it softly with a nail until it hardened to a little nub, I teased, "Why don't you channel your energy into making me scream again? It's been a whole two days and I'm feeling neglected."

Stretching languidly, I arched my back so my pelvis rocked against his in what I meant to be a seductive invitation to fuck me silly. His cock sprang to life like a Jack-in-the-Box. His reaction was so immediate that I ruined my sultry-eyed sex kitten expression by snorting with humor.

Sean's troubled eyes darkened with passion, but his lips twitched into a panty-drenching smile that promised wicked pleasures in my immediate future. "You're insatiable, wench. I think I've created a monster."

_Yep. You sure did._ Had I known sex was this amazing, I would've attacked him the first second I laid eyes on him. Good God. The man was mind blowing. Probably I should keep this to myself so his head doesn't explode. But dayam!

A few minutes later, he rested his chin on the slick muscle of my inner thigh, the results of my orgasm shimmering on his lips, and asked, "Are you purring?"

The dream was gone, but I held fragments of it behind my eyelids. Like a kaleidoscope, the green and black shifted and changed in tiny cells. They formed a beautiful black and green symmetrical pattern that was only ruined by a singular discordant flash of blinding white. I hovered in that magical state between sleep and wakefulness and forced my sight to reach beyond the tiny cells. What if I could pull away the borders to open the image up as it was meant to be seen, _outside_ of a dream?

Breathing deeply, I dismantled the edges piece by piece. As each cell was released, the nonsensical colors took shape as a green forest in the dark of night. The sky sparkled with millions of stars. I marveled at the brilliance of the tiny balls of gas when a flash nearer to me caught my attention. Just outside my vision, a vivid white light expanded and contracted with greater intensity. The light exploded, and my vision went dark.

"Easy now, come back to me. Open your eyes."

My eyes fluttered, but I anchored to the rich sound of his voice, practicing my breathing as I had every day for weeks. My hand was shaking, and Killian steadied it against the top of his thigh.

"Good girl. Now breathe slowly until you feel balanced again."

"Well?" I asked.

He peered into my face, studying my eyes for damages, and sat back on his heels. "It's much better this time. You still have color, and you controlled your breathing. Both good signs, I think. Your eyes look freaked out though—maybe you could blink now—you're scaring the wildlife." He gestured toward a squirrel that was peeking nervously from behind a branch above us.

In the back of the property, I'd found a secluded space surrounded by maple trees with a wide patch of fresh, soft grass in the center. Too small to be a real meadow, it was perfect for my lessons. Every other day, I came here and worked on refining my sight. Some days I came alone and meditated. During meditation, I opened my mind to any premonitions or dreams that would come. No premonitions had shown up so far. Dreams came often, but sometimes nothing came at all. The cream-colored room in my mind sat empty and calm. Killian came with me every few days. In his way, he was a natural teacher. He was extremely patient and relaxed while we worked through the exercises he designed.

"What do you remember about the dream?" he asked.

Unimpressed with the latest dream's disturbing lack of details, I shrugged. "Green forest, starry sky, explosion."

He was thoughtful for a moment and admitted with a hint of apology in his tone, "I caught the explosion in your eyes. Did you see what it was?"

"You did what? How did you see that?"

It was his turn to shrug. "I always watch your eyes when you slip into a trance. If your eyes are partially open, I can see your visions too. I only saw a bright flash this time."

"That is so cool."

Intrigued with this new information, we lost track of time, brainstorming possible causes and reasons for this connection between us. It was fascinating how I was connected differently to each of them. Dec could hear my voice from anywhere, Killian could hear my thoughts and see my visions, and I was becoming more convinced that Sean was connected to the core of who I am . . . He shared my soul.

What did it all mean?

Later that night, I hummed a little Kings of Leon while digging through the closet for my favorite sandals. Dani had called earlier and wanted to meet at The Angry Lizard. We hadn't had a chance to hang out in ages and I was overdue some socializing. All work and no play make this girl a cranky bi-otch.

Short and gauzy with layers of white cotton, my skirt floated around my thighs when I twirled in front of the mirror. Nice and flirty. Perfect. Sean was going to love this. It was hot tonight, so I pulled a fitted amethyst tank top over my head and straightened the hem. The only jewelry was my locket. I never took it off.

Sean poked his head in the door. "You ready to go yet? We're waiting for you."

"Perfect timing. Come in for a sec." I curtseyed and batted my eyelashes. "Well?"

His eyes gleamed with pride as they roamed over my flushed face and bare legs. "Beautiful! Too beautiful to go out. Let's stay here . . ." He tugged me up for a long lingering kiss that made me dizzy and overheated.

On the way to the car, Killian took one look at me and pressed his lips together. With an amused wag of his head, he commandeered the driver's seat. It was odd riding in a car with all three of them. We hadn't gone out together before. Socializing wasn't really Killian's thing.

As he parked at the curb, a small group of thugs-in-training watched us with unfriendly interest. Didn't they realize they would never win a fight with their pants around their knees and their shoes untied? They whistled rudely as I exited the back seat. They nearly swallowed their tongues when Sean and Dec unfolded themselves to their full heights. When Killian locked his emotionless eyes on them, they suddenly found something else to gawk at. He took half a step towards them and they scattered like pigeons.

Sean draped an arm around my shoulders and sent his brother a tight-lipped smile that weakened to a half-grin. "Show off."

Dani spotted us as soon as we walked through the doors. Waving madly, she beamed with joy. Beside her, Aric was lounging against her table with a beer in his hand. Ah, that explains the glow. I made a beeline for Dani while the guys checked for trouble. They were never off-duty when we left the security of the farmhouse. With Dagin's truce dissolved, it was open warfare. We never knew when we'd run into one of Dagin's crew.

"I've missed you!" Dani gushed when I finally stopped hugging her. She was adorable. It wasn't a surprise to find Aric sticking around.

"It's so good to see you! I love those stones. Your mom's?"

Flipping the crystal choker away from her throat to catch the light, she nodded with a proud twinkle in her eyes, and said, "They're new. Aric bought them for our anniversary."

While Dani and I got caught up, Sean, Dec, and Aric exchanged the usual guy greetings of head nods and _how's-it-goings_ before settling back to coolly check out the rest of the crowd. Everyone was happy until Killian appeared and straddled a stool at our table.

He swept his eyes over Dani and Aric, and asked curtly, "How's it going?"

Clearly he was staying.

Poor Aric actually choked on his beer. I bit the inside of my cheek as Dani helpfully thumped him between the shoulders. Yes. It was a rare event here in Plattsburgh. The first wild Killian sighting in probably a year . . . Dani shot me a questioning glance filled with smothered laughter. Before I could say anything, Ricki, Kevin, and Tyler strolled in. They took one look at us and froze with identical stony expressions. Geez, what is everyone's problem tonight?

"Seriously? Now what?" My little bubble of joy was fast dissolving into crap. Was it too much to ask to have a drama-free night out?

Across the table, Sean arched a brow, and mouthed, " _Pool_?"

"Good idea. Hey, Killian, come play a game with me?" I marched towards the far pool table.

Nonplussed, he played along. "Is this necessary?" He smiled in his best harmless way as he racked up the balls.

"You look like the big bad wolf when you smile like that!" I broke into giggles at my own joke.

His mouth curved into an irresistible smile that broke through his usually stoic mask. He actually looked human. Maybe I was crazy, but I loved this complicated creature that scared the hell out of mere mortals. I understood their fear, but he was on their side. He risked his life constantly for them. They just didn't know it. It wasn't fair.

_Dangerous thoughts, Princess_. Moving lazily, he chalked the tip of the stick and waved me to go first.

"Mica, are you going to tell me what's going on or what?" Ricki wasn't one to sugarcoat anything.

I got that she was pissed at me, but sneaking up behind me in the middle of a shot? That was just cruel.

I scratched. Damn it. I sucked at pool. "What are you asking about, Ricki? I really don't understand what the problem is."

Killian took his shot, and of course, the ball went into the pocket. He was killing me. The night wasn't a total loss. I _did_ manage to get him to laugh and smile and look human so my friends felt safe staying in the same building with him. Ricki was too intent on grilling me to let him intimidate her right now. Besides, she once threatened to screw him in a cave . . .

Leaning closer and lowering her voice, she rephrased her concerns with more than a little defensiveness to her tone. "Are you happy with _him_?" She glanced at Sean under her lashes.

Shocked, I said, "What kind of a question is that? I'm deliriously happy with him! Why would you ask that?" My voice rose, and Sean and Dec both glanced over.

Not done yet, she continued, "You flinch every time he tries to touch you, and you have bruises on both of your arms . . ." Her voice trailed off before breaking. "He's . . . they . . . they're all so . . ."

Straightening stiffly, I filled in the blanks. "Protective? How about _strong_ or _kind_? Maybe those are the words you're looking for!"

Killian's lips twitched as he lined up another shot. Sean came up behind me and draped an arm around my shoulders. Grateful for the support, I sank against him.

With a puzzled half-smile, he kissed me lightly and asked, "What's going on? Everything okay?"

Ricki's cheeks flushed with anger, her eyes narrowed and burned. She was about to explode. Killian twitched again. This time, his shoulders shook and he turned away. _What was wrong with him?_ Then I heard him chuckling inside my head. He was trying to send his thoughts but couldn't stop laughing to focus them. _Was he counting?_ Behaving as naturally as I could, I was trying to tell Killian to shut up when I realized what he was laughing about.

My shoulders were tingling and the feeling was spreading down my back, creeping up my neck. Ugh! Not now! Shit. Killian finally erupted with laughter, causing everyone to stare at him long enough for me to run to the bathroom.

Dec was waiting for me when I reappeared. His whole face lit up as a cheesy grin nearly cleaved his face in half. He was enjoying this entirely too much. Winking conspiratorially, he chided, "Girl, you've got to get a grip on that! You can't bust out into light every time he touches you. It's not natural!"

I guess the ice had broken while I was getting a grip on my power surge, because everyone seemed to be chilling. Sean was in the middle of a game of pool with Tyler, Aric, and Dani. Killian leaned against the bar nursing a beer, casually watching the Stanley Cup finals on the big screen TV. I sighed. Not all of my friends were happy. Ricki was crying on Kevin's shoulder.

"Damn it, Dec. I don't know how to fix this."

Dec gave me a gentle nudge. "Ricki loves you, remember? Go talk to her."

"I've tried talking. She's not listening. What am I supposed to say?"

"Tell her as much of the truth as you can. That's all you can do. The rest is up to her."

Okay, good point. I can do this. I'll just have to be creative.

I hurried to the table before I chickened out and bolted. After inhaling a fortifying breath, I blurted, "I have bruises because I'm learning Krav Maga. I can't learn without a partner and bruises happen. Sean isn't abusing or controlling me in any way. I flinched when he reached for me that day because I was mugged in Quebec and was still a little jumpy." Not too many lies. I took another deep breath and plunged ahead. "If he's protective, it's because he's seen me bleed. You don't know this, but he . . . they . . . all _three_ of them, have pulled me out of Scott's hands more than once. Probably they saved my life and I'm grateful."

She shrugged in confusion. "When? I didn't know."

"No, you didn't know. I didn't tell you, and they respect me too much to talk about it. All you need to know is they _all_ care about me and would never hurt me. Look at them! Do they seem dangerous to you?" I gestured at the pool game to make my point.

Right on cue, Sean chose that second to tip his head back to laugh at Dani's bad shot. His expression was open and admiring as he teased her about her aim. Tyler passed him a fresh beer. Sean seemed perfectly harmless. Of course, no one could see the weapons under his clothes. Not to be outshined, Dec threw out his best dimply smile and made a peace sign with both hands. No, they didn't look dangerous just then.

Sniffing hard, she blinked the last few tears away, and said with a strangled laugh, "I feel like a total bitch."

"Nah, not so much. But you can relax. I'm fine." I hugged her close, grimacing as she accidently squeezed one of my many bruises. I have _got_ to learn how to heal myself . . .

Days later I got my chance. Sean and I just finished another brutal session, and I was sweating like a pig and sucking in oxygen. The air in the basement was stuffy, and I gulped at it like it was water. Unfazed by the workout, he tapped his fingers on his thigh and reviewed my progress. I'd learned to disarm a gunman, dodge a knife attack, and break someone's neck, so I expected some praise.

"You have to do more, babe. You're not giving me everything you've got. In real life, you'd be dead ten times over."

My face fell. "You're kidding, right?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding?"

Frustrated, I threw a right hook at the punching bag. "Do you think I'm not taking this seriously? I'm working as hard as I can!" I punched the bag again. "I'm not you!"

In two strides he crossed to block my next swing. Crushing my fist inside of his, he snapped, "No, you're _not_ me! That's the problem—you're _still_ too vulnerable." The harsh anger in his tone shifted to a velvety threat. "Do you have any idea how easy it is to kill a fragile human?"

Still holding my fist, he lightly touched my bare stomach with the knuckles of his other hand. "One small blade right here would do it. Or here—or here." He trailed his fingers over my kidneys, my heart. That fragile muscle pounded through his palm as he ran through the many ways a human can die. I was nearly breathless by the time he finally wrapped his fingers around my neck and looked me dead in the eye. "Give me more!"

We were back on the mats again, and I had a new plan. Raphael's words echoed in my head— _Use your strengths to become stronger._ Instead of lunging at him, I stood very still and reached out to his mind. Eyes slightly closed, I waited for his attack. It came almost immediately. He feigned a lunge to my right side, but then dove into my legs. I jumped to the right, and he hit the floor and rolled. Back in a crouch, he aimed a rib-cracking kick at my side. At the last second, I twisted so his foot barely grazed me. I flipped backwards and then tried to sweep his legs, but he blocked me and I fell hard to the mat. He used this to his advantage by yanking my legs out from under me and flinging me several feet to one side. I threw my hands out to stop my fall and landed hard on my elbow. The crack was excruciating. I collapsed on my face with a cry.

"Shit. I heard that. You okay?" he asked with more than a little concern in his voice.

I think not. I moaned and rolled onto my back, cradling my arm to my chest. I gave him a wan smile. "I think I broke my elbow . . . Ow."

Being the excellent boyfriend that he is, he carried me upstairs to the living room. After getting some ice, he left me to find Dec. My favorite healer took one look at the swollen mess and declared, "Yep. It's broken." After sucking some air through his teeth, he squatted next to the couch. "Tell you what. Let's look at this as a teachable moment."

"A what?"

Grinning at my dismay, he logically explained, "You can't practice healing yourself unless you're really hurt. This is a perfect opportunity, so man up, darlin'."

He was right. It hurt—a _lot_! I didn't share his enthusiasm. I should be horrified at the whininess in my voice, but I wanted him to fix it and fix it now. "Come on, Dec. Please. It hurts!"

Sean and Dec exchanged silent words before Dec headed to the kitchen for ice. In no time flat I was lying on the floor with my poor elbow resting on a bag of ice because the pain kept me from focusing.

"This sucks. I hate you, Declan!"

He knelt down to my level, mouth quirking at the corners, eyes warm and loving. I stuck my tongue out at him. "Don't be such a girly-girl. I'll walk you through it." As he talked, he smoothed my hair away from my eyes and pressed his lips to my forehead in a very sweet kiss. "It's for your own good. Ready?"

"No. But let's do it anyway before I pass out from the pain." He was right, but no way was I admitting it.

"This is really very easy. Close your eyes and imagine your energy inside of you. Picture the flow like a current that passes through your blood . . . your muscles. Do you see it?"

"Mmm hmm."

He continued his instructions in a smooth, lilting tone that relaxed the bow-like tension in my neck. "Good. Now picture it surrounding your whole body . . . arms, legs, head, everything. Okay?"

I nodded. My body was tingling and warm all over. I cracked open my eyes. The faint glow of energy enveloped me like a cocoon.

Dec made a small sound of approval, and said, "You're doing excellent. I can see what you're doing. You're controlling it, aren't you? Now guide that energy to your elbow. Focus it on the break."

I tried to picture the energy pouring into my arm and then surrounding my elbow. It wasn't that easy though. The image wavered, and the energy flowed back around the outline of my body instead of into my elbow. It was like pouring water on top of oil . . . It kept trying to separate.

Dec encouraged, "Focus, Mica. You have the power. You have the will. Concentrate."

Inhaling deeply, I re-attacked. This time, the energy wrapped around my elbow and stayed put. Okay, so now what?

"Okay, now imagine the break is knitting back together. Picture the healing in your mind as you keep the energy focused. You'll see when you're healed."

I did as he said and gradually the bones straightened and knit back together. The process was intense though. My brain was exhausted with the effort, and I finally collapsed into sleep.

The clanking of dishes woke me up. I wandered into the kitchen to see what was being destroyed. Lounging against the doorway, I surveyed the warzone. Huh. Dec and Sean were cooking dinner, and it actually smelled good. This is new. Sean spotted me and waved.

"Hey, come and try this." He held up a fork of grilled chicken.

"Wow, that's good. I had no idea you could cook."

Lifting an eyebrow, he hinted darkly, "I have many secrets."

After dinner, Killian announced he had news for us. The delicious food formed a lump in my gut that threatened to come back up. They had new orders from Alex. The Manhattan team finally had some detailed intel on Dagin's operations. Sean and Killian had managed to immobilize Xarchi at Dump and had taken him to an interrogation chamber. While flatly refusing to give me any gory details, Killian explained that Xarchi had been particularly helpful before he was sent back to hell in a cloud of ash. It seemed Dagin was dabbling in the arms trade. His engineers were producing a new weapon that he was getting ready to put on the black market. No one had any doubt the new weapon would be catastrophic and create mass chaos. There was simply no other reason for demons to get involved with humans. The problem was, we still didn't exactly know what we were dealing with. The techies were still reverse-engineering one of the weapons that Dec hijacked from the red warehouse.

I swiveled towards Dec. "You took one of the weapons? Why didn't you tell me?"

He shrugged. "It's no big deal. I snatched it from the warehouse and brought it to our lab."

Killian rapped his knuckles on the table to recapture our attention. "You didn't have a need to know, Mica. Sorry. Our final orders are to blow up that lab and destroy any chemicals or equipment we find. That's the plan. We'll head out tomorrow. Check your gear. Be ready."

I opened my mouth to ask a question, but he raised a hand to cut me off. "I hope you've learned what you need to. It's time to get serious. Playtime is over."

# Chapter 27: Playtime is Over

" _PLAYTIME IS OVER. Playtime is over_." I stalked to my room, muttering the entire way down the hall. Did he really, _really_ , think this was fun for me? I snorted through my nose. Yeah, sure I loved getting thrown around the basement. And turning my brain inside out was just hilarious! Asshat! I should've kicked him in the head when I had the chance. I slammed the door and felt better.

A soft knock interrupted my grumbling. The door cracked open and Sean poked his head inside.

"I know you're not asleep. Can I come in?"

Ungraciously, I grunted and turned my back. He took that as permission and came inside. Instead of coming over to the bed, he walked to the window and gazed out at the fading light. He was absorbed in his own thoughts as the sun set for the night. I had alternated between staring at the ceiling and staring at his back for the last thirty minutes. By the time it was fully dark, I was over my bad mood and wanted to talk. The silence stretched uncomfortably, and I didn't know how to break it. Just as I was about to go to him, he flopped down on the bed and covered his eyes with the back of his arm.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I wish I knew."

"Cryptic."

"It's the best I've got." He ran a hand through his hair until it stood up in spikes. I smiled at the sight. He didn't smile back.

The pattering of rain on the roof filled the silence. A soft rumble of thunder echoed in the trees, and a faint flash of lightning lit up his face. I shivered in the cool air. A storm was coming, but when? Sean reached out, and I slid into the circle of his arms. His mood was grim, and my imagination took great liberties as it tried to figure out the cause. He was still keeping secrets. What did he know that he wasn't telling me? What did Alex tell him? What was going on?

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He took my hand and kissed it. Peering into my eyes, he traced my jaw with a fingertip, and whispered, "I can't find the words." He yawned hugely, and added in a more matter of fact tone, "Maybe I just need some sleep."

I didn't really believe that; he was just changing the subject. I let it go for now and curled up with him. Even as his breathing slowed, and he relaxed in sleep, I stared at the ceiling. Something was very wrong. I felt it in my bones. I trusted the feeling, and it scared me to death.

The coming of the new day brought with it only watery sunlight that washed out the hard lines of the room. The effect was a sense of being underwater as the rain poured down the windows. A loud crack of thunder brought Sean springing upright with instant alertness. After scanning the room for intruders with his hand halfway to his gun, he reluctantly relaxed again. His eyes were deep blue, but the shadows under them were purple in the grey light. His face was white with fatigue, and the tiny crease between his eyes was more pronounced this morning.

He gave me a crooked smile, and said, "You look tired, babe. Didn't you sleep at all?"

"Funny, I was just thinking the same thing." I kissed the tiny crease and smoothed my fingers over his face until he sighed.

"We're a mess, aren't we?" I asked.

He stopped my hands and kissed them one at a time before tucking them behind my head. As I gazed into his unguarded eyes, the truth of his thoughts came crashing into me—as did the heart-wrenching pain and fear that filled his mind—he was barely hanging on. Closing my eyes against the battering force of his emotions, I clutched him to me, desperate to feel something other than fear. We clung together as the full force of the storm broke over the house. The incessant scream of the wind urged us on. _Hurry, hurry . . . Time is running out_. Rain slammed against the glass, drowning out all other sounds. When the last rumble of thunder was very far away, we fell into a dreamless sleep.

They were grouped around the big dining room table looking at sketches when I finally made an appearance that afternoon.

"I want to talk to you."

"Can it wait?" Killian asked absently.

"You're going over the plans for tonight, right?"

He nodded.

"Then no, it can't wait." I pulled up a chair and straddled it.

"Fine. What's on your mind, Mica?"

"I want to go inside with you tonight. I can help."

Sean protested, "No, you're not. You'll stay outside and be our eyes like we planned."

"You need me to balance the team. I can fight as well as you, and I can shoot a gun now. I'm just as trained as you guys are."

Killian's eyebrows went straight up. "You think _you'r_ e as trained as _we_ are? Really?"

I backpedalled. "Okay, maybe not, but I have skills you can use. Let me help."

I appealed to Dec for support, but he bolted to the kitchen to feed Domino. Coward! Sean set his lips together and glowered at Killian in silent conversation.

After an eternity, Killian picked up his wicked boot knife and pointed to a position on the sketch. "You'll be here. I need you to be eyes and ears outside. Bring the NVGs and check your earpiece and mic. You got that?"

I gritted my teeth and must've looked mutinous, because he quickly added, "Or you can stay here with the dog. It's your choice, princess."

I glared at both of them before throwing up my hands. "Fine! I'll do whatever you tell me to do. But I don't like it! What if something happens to one of you inside? I could help. I—"

Sean stood up so abruptly his chair fell over backwards. His face paled with anger. "Stop it! Do you hear the words that are coming out of your mouth? What if something happens to one of us? What would you do then? If Dec is killed, how will you help him? If I'm killed, how will you help? If Killian is killed, then what? _What?!_ Mica, you're not thinking! You can't help. If shit goes sideways, we'll be dead, and so will you."

Now it was nearly time to head out, and I was nervous. I checked and double-checked my body armor, cleaned my Sig, loaded it, stuffed extra magazines into my pockets, and strapped on my new Bowie knife. I checked myself in the mirror. I had on black camouflage pants and a thin long-sleeved black shirt. I had black boots on my feet and body armor covering my chest. My gun was tucked into its holster, my knife strapped to my thigh. I was now a mercenary—for God no less. Raphael was right; my life wasn't mine anymore. I looked out the window and groaned. The rain had come back with a vengeance. Our fearless leader checked the radar and announced we'd have rain all night. The storm was moving to Vermont so we'd have to deal with it for the next six hours. Well, at least we'd have cover . . .

Two hours later, Domino huddled under a bush and shook water out of her ears. My hat kept the water from running into mine, but it still ran down my back. I was already soaked through to my underwear so it was pointless to find shelter. When he dropped me off, Killian reminded me that I wouldn't melt. Guess he had a point. As long as I could hear and see, I would be able to do my job tonight.

Sean scanned the clearing and reminded me, for the twentieth time, to watch the driveway and the back of the property for latecomers. He had about five more minutes before he had to move into his position. Killian wanted it to be fully dark, and it was nearly there. Thunder rumbled in the distance, and the wind picked up again. It made me uneasy. I shivered. Sean peered through the binoculars at the roofline and mumbled to himself some more. He had gone over the plan twice since we got here. All business now, he didn't waste any time worrying about me. It was go-time. He was a professional. He'd do what he'd have to do tonight. I understood that, and I—

Cutting off my thoughts, he pinned me against the tree. My head was spinning by the time he released my mouth, and I dragged in a ragged breath of air. The relentless rain sluiced between us like a waterfall. The dense woods surrounded us like a jungle. Lost in the moment, there was only him, only now. He dragged his mouth across my throat, kissing me with an unexpected tenderness.

"God, Mica! You're ripping my heart out!" Before I could respond, he crushed me against him, ravaging my mouth with a hunger that set me on fire. His hands dug into my shoulders, bruising, clutching me to his hard body. My skin sizzled as the current ripped through my blood, and I shook with too much energy, too much power to contain. Arching with the pain, I moaned against his mouth until he released me to search my eyes in the darkness. A pale flicker of lightning cast an odd shadow over Sean, and for a moment, just for a moment, I thought I saw a different face. Then the illusion was gone, and I saw only the flickering gold lights in his eyes.

With one last hard kiss, he pulled away, hissing fiercely, "Stay alert!"

And he was gone.

I let the cool rain soak my overheated body, my thoughts ricocheting like a pinball machine, my mouth tingling and tasting of Sean. Everything would be okay, right? Sure. This was a routine mission. Nothing too hairy, right? Everything would be okay. I repeated this positive thought until I was almost convinced, but my instincts still harped at the back of my mind. Nagging, nagging . . . _tick tock_. The clock was ticking and time was running out.

_Mica! I need you to focus. Do you hear me?_ Killian's thoughts fairly roared through my mind. _You can't worry about things you can't control._

I'm sorry. It's just a bad feeling.

His tone softened _. I know._ _We'll talk later. Now get to work._

I used my night vision goggles, NVGs, to scan the perimeter. The farmhouse compound was surrounded by an electrified fence with concertino wire running along its top. There was one gate that was monitored with a camera and an electronic keypad. Killian's intel source said it was the only gate onto the property. I hoped he was right about that. I couldn't see much on the other side of the building from my position. That made me a little nervous. What if reinforcements could come in from that direction? We'd be screwed. Moving my eyes slowly along the fence line, I was relieved to see it was clear. I focused on the house next. There were sentries posted on each end of the second story porch. As I watched, one of them tossed a cigarette over the side where it fell like a tiny shooting star. A moment later, he slumped over in a quiet pile as Dec took him out. He slid the body out of sight and picked up the man's rifle. He faced my direction and whispered into his mic, "I'm in."

I breathed out. One down, two to go. Sean should be next. Endless seconds later, Sean called in too. Just one more. Killian was on the other side of the compound and was supposed to slip into the basement to set the charges. They would set the timers, and then get out of there. Killian should've been there by now. Where was he? I peered at the house with the NVGs again. Everything looked quiet. Wait a minute! What's that?

"Company! Three men . . . no— _not_ men—make that three _demons_. Shit. They just appeared on the driveway."

Domino growled under her breath. Not tearing my eyes away from the scene in front of me, I reached down and lay a hand on her head.

Sean's voice came through the earpiece. "Where now?"

"Heading into the house. Uh-oh, they're looking up at the second floor. Dec, they see you! Move!"

My vision was blinded as the demon threw a fireball at Dec. I couldn't see where he was now. Did he vanish? The demon was still there . . .

"Sean! Dec's gone."

Domino snarled and backed into my calf.

"Chill, Cujo, before I shoot you."

I whipped around with my gun in my hand. He aimed his at my head at the same time I leveled mine at his chest. He stood about six feet away. I liked my odds.

The man drawled, "Well, hell, you're just a chick. Why don't you put that gun down so we can get to know each other before I bring you to the barn?" He cocked the gun with a click.

Domino bared her teeth. The wind was picking up again and gusts were blowing branches around the two of us. I waited, searching his eyes. They flickered the moment he made his decision. In a split second, I lunged for his gun hand and shoved it to the side, snapping his finger in the trigger, ripping an agonized howl from his throat. I jammed my other hand into his nose. As he lost his balance, I threw myself backwards and came up with the gun pointing at his chest again. Nose dripping, he lunged. I pulled the trigger, and he dropped to his knees with a hole in his chest and a look of surprise on his face. I shot him again. Killian told me to always double-tap. The man listed to the right and slid over in slow motion. The driving rain filled his open brown eyes, and I bent over and threw up.

The rain and wind seemed to muffle everything, so I prayed no one heard the gun shots. Still shaking with adrenaline, I crept back into my position. I didn't see any new movement on the ground. The demons were gone! No! Where did they go? Frantic, I scanned every inch of the property and came up empty. No demons and no sign of Dec either. Sean and Killian were still out of sight and off the radio. I chewed on my lip. _Come on, guys . . . Where are you?_

I tried the radio, but no one answered me. Domino nudged me and whined. I stiffened and strained to hear. It was no use. The rain was too loud. I couldn't hear anything at all. Should I go down there? Hesitantly, I took a couple of steps and stopped. Sean's words echoed in my memory and I was torn. _Go or stay?_

After yelling at me in the dining room, he finally threw up his hands, and shouted, "My God, Mica, is it so fucking wrong for me to want to keep you alive? I'm supposed to protect you! I love you! No matter what happens tonight, promise me you'll stay out of that farmhouse. If it goes well, we'll all come out. If it doesn't, well, you can't help us in there."

Against my better judgment, I promised him. It was a promise I regretted now as I stood in the pouring rain with a dead guy and a wet dog. I anxiously twisted my locket, as if that would make them magically appear. The locket was my connection to them all. I clutched it like a talisman and prayed they were okay. As the seconds ticked into minutes, I paced, thinking furiously. Finally, an idea started to take shape. Killian expected me to use my abilities or he wouldn't have agreed to bring me tonight. Maybe I didn't need to _go_ into the house, because I should be able to see into it from here . . .

Creeped out by the dead guy, I picked my way to another good hiding place. I settled into the spongy wet ground and slowed my breathing. It took a few minutes of concentration, but eventually I could see inside the walls. Well, now, this is cool . . . I can see _through_ the walls. Wow. Methodically, I scanned the second floor. Three dead humans. No Primani and no demons either. The balcony was empty too. Hmm, that was not a good sign. Sean should've been up there. I continued my tour down to the first floor. There were five men standing in what probably used to be a living room, but now looked like an office. Three of them carried guns, but the other two didn't. They had a geeky air about them. Hmm, maybe doctors or scientists; I'll mention them to Killian later. Two demons were leaning against the desk, talking to the men. From the expressions on their faces, they were getting their butts chewed. No one looked happy, but maybe that's just the normal effect demons have on people. I didn't see any dead bodies, nor Sean or Killian.

Okay, now for the basement. I paused for a split second to relax my eyes. This viewing was harder than I thought it would be. My head was aching with the effort and sweat ran in rivers down my back. Rolling my shoulders to loosen the tension, I closed my eyes and then opened them again. After taking a deep breath, I focused on the basement. It was pitch black down there. I strained to see into the darkness. A movement caught my eye. There it was again—a flash of skin. Who _was_ that? The vision wavered and I caught my breath. _Focus . . . Focus._ Okay, that's better. Killian and Sean were on opposite sides of the room setting the charges. Moving like wraiths, they attached the timers to each set of explosives and moved on. Dec played lookout by the stairs.

Something startled me, and the vision vanished like smoke. Moving only my eyes, I searched the woods and strained my ears. There it was again! A stealthy shadow moved outside the corner of my eye. The next flash of lightning illuminated them. All of them. Sonofabitch.

I pressed myself deeper into the mud. Domino scooted backwards under the brush and pressed herself into the mud too. I was trapped here while they moved toward the house. I had to warn the guys.

_Killian! This place is surrounded! Don't come out here!_ No response. I tried again and again.

Finally, I heard his voice faintly say, _Two minutes. Close your eyes!_

Barely breathing, I waited. Two minutes crawled by, but the explosion didn't come. Another minute went by and still no explosion. Meanwhile, the other men were creeping closer to the house with their weapons raised. Come on, come on, what's taking so long? I closed my eyes and peered into the basement again. My heart nearly stopped. The basement wasn't dark now. Two demons were lighting it up with fireballs. Dec and Sean stood back to back to block the demons trying to get to Killian. He was setting the final timer. A fireball flew towards his head, but he just ducked and kept working.

With a muffled pop, the first of the explosions went off. I flinched as the light flared behind my eyes. Dec was thrown off balance and fell into a pallet stacked with guns. One of the demons jumped at him and disappeared in the black smoke. One by one, the timers went off, and the explosions rocked the foundation. Oh, my God! Get out of there! What are you waiting for? Sean turned back to reach for Dec, who was struggling to push the demon off of him. Separated by flames, Killian yelled at them to go. As they fought for their lives, I held my breath. Horrified, I couldn't look away. After shoving the burning pallet to the side, Sean grabbed at Dec's arm just as the big demon aimed one of the strange weapons at Sean's back. He fired just as the barrels of chemicals exploded in a blinding burst of white light.

I screamed, " _Sean!_ "

With a deafening roar, the house blew apart. The blast was so intense it seared my eyes. Stunned beyond thought, I staggered upright as half of my soul was ripped away. Sean! Oh, my God! No! Still screaming his name, I was barely aware of Dec's arms around me or our flight away from the men with guns.

Back at the house, I stumbled blindly to our room, calling for Sean until Dec finally caught me close and pinned me to his chest.

"He's not here, Mica." The anguish in his eyes confirmed what my heart told me was true.

With my eyes streaming bloody tears, I sobbed in his arms until he put me to sleep.

I slept for five days during which I dreamed continuously of the last five minutes of Sean. I replayed everything that happened in that basement. A never-ending nightmare, every second played out in slow motion. The demons. The fight. The fire. The massive explosion. My brain wouldn't let it go, and I cried for hours until Raphael came and put me into a deeper sleep.

Dec and Raphael stayed with me. I heard them whispering but refused to wake up. They were terrified for me because my heart didn't beat like it should, and my eyes still bled. My skin was bluish and cool. I was too distraught to heal myself and the strange energy that I once shared with Sean was of little use now. I was curled around an icy core of pain and withdrew from the warming energy. I could barely breathe without him.

On day six, Killian returned. The desperation in his voice penetrated the fog of my sleep. He pushed open my door and froze when our eyes met. He'd obviously been to Hell and back. Covered with soot and blood, he still wore the clothes from the raid. The worst part was the haunted expression in his eyes. He blamed himself, and it was eating him alive. Exhausted, he staggered to the bed and fell to his knees.

"I tried, Mica, I tried. I can't . . . _find_ him." His voice broke and he bowed his head against the bed. "Forgive me."

I lay my hand on the back of his neck. "God, Killian, it's not your fault," I rasped through the emotion clogging my throat.

He trailed a filthy finger over the trickle of blood leaking from my eye. "It's not yours either."

Choking on a sob, I tugged him forward until he wrapped his arms around me. Clinging like a drowning man, he rocked me as I wept against his neck. After a while, his tears slid down my face, and I started to breathe again.

# Epilogue:

THE SAD MELODY of the mourning dove seemed appropriate somehow. The delicate bird sang like its heart was broken on the wrought-iron fence behind me. Only half listening to it, I gazed into the fountain as memories drifted through my mind. Wicked blue eyes haunted me today as they had every day since he disappeared. The memories were so real, I woke up some nights with his hands on my body, only to curl up in loneliness. I could still feel his lips on mine as the rain poured over us in the horrid forest. I shook my head to clear the senseless dreaming. He was gone, and he was never coming back. Knowing it and believing it were two different things. I've had a year to come to terms with it, but it still felt wrong. I still didn't accept the obvious. He just can't be gone . . .

In the days following that disastrous raid, I was shattered into a million pieces. If it weren't for Dec, I would have curled up and slept forever. As it was, his gentle ways gradually brought me out of my stupor and back into the world. Dec had scolded and encouraged me to start living again. Taking me by the hand, he dragged me into the woods to hike and recharge my dead batteries. Even though he hated it, he ran with me until we both dripped with sweat, but I got stronger.

Though no one blamed him, Killian took full responsibility and all of the guilt for Sean's disappearance. Not eating—not sleeping—he searched endlessly for any signs of Sean. The guilt nearly ate him alive until Zadkiel came to stay with us. He was a godsend, literally. Patiently, he taught us to grieve and to let go of the anger and bitterness. He promised us that things happened for a reason, and we would someday understand. He said letting Sean go would bring me peace again. He said a lot of things that were all probably true. God knows I tried to let Sean go, but my body and soul wouldn't cooperate. A piece of me had been ripped away, and I still felt un-whole.

The mission in Vermont had destroyed Dagin's operations and set the chemical weapons development back at least a couple of years. The powers above Alex were thankful for our efforts that day, and we'd been moved to other duties since then. Sure, the mission was a success—but at an unthinkable cost. I couldn't imagine going through that again and had refused to use my sight since that day. It was too painful to consider.

Pushing down the pain, I stood to go. Killian was waiting. He watched me with hooded eyes as he leaned against a stone picnic table. I smiled despite the lingering sadness.

"You okay, Princess?" he called. "You look tired."

"I didn't sleep much last night," I explained when I reached him. He lifted my sunglasses and peered into the blue of my eyes.

"Let me help," he offered for the hundredth time.

"You already have," I responded with a small smile.

As I turned away from the fountain, I paused. A faint swirl of sparkling gold caught the corner of my eye, and the hair on the back of my neck stood up.

" _Sean_?"

# Next in the Series!

The sizzle continues in _Call the Lightning_. With Sean nowhere to be found, Mica is drawn deeper into the dangerous Primani world. When enigmatic Killian takes over her protection, she soon finds herself divided against her past and her future. Enjoy!

A STORM WAS COMING. Angry thunder rumbled in the distance and cold gusts of wind bent the branches of the maple trees around me. Unconcerned with Mother Nature's snippiness, I focused on my breathing and relaxed. The smell of green things filled my head as I opened my mind to what would come. When I meditated, I tuned out the world and found peace. The tiny room I visualized in my mind was empty and calm at the moment. I wanted it to stay that way and made no effort to reach out for a premonition. Today I sought only peace.

A gust of wind blew my hair into my eyes and scattered my thoughts like leaves. I shoved my hair back and tried to regain my earlier sense of peace. A drop of chilly rain splashed off of my outstretched palm and yet I continued to breathe slowly and deeply. Gradually I drifted into my happy place and tuned out the storm completely. I floated among the trees with feet that didn't touch the mossy earth. Warm air caressed my skin as I made my way into the forest. Fine tendrils of mist swirled at my feet as I wandered. No light guided me, no darkness stalked me. Today I merely wandered free and alone. I'd found the peace I longed for, but something was missing. Someone was missing.

Rain sluiced down my back as a bolt of lightning struck a tree behind me. The loud crack barely penetrated my consciousness. Another sound held my full attention now. Beginning softly and growing louder, I heard someone calling my name. The next flash of lightning lingered brilliant cobalt long after the sound of thunder faded.

"Mica!" Killian's sharp voice against my ear brought me out of my dream world and back to reality.

I blinked rain out of my eyes and accepted his hand. As he pulled me up, I shook my head to clear it. His familiar touch steadied me as I came back to the moment. The heavy rain softened the lines of his face and made him look more human than usual. His thick black lashes were clumped together around those brilliant blue eyes that still startled me with their intensity. Today they were fathomless midnight; other days, the wild color of the ocean. I sighed wistfully. He was gorgeous, and I'd be blind if I didn't see that.

"What did you see this time?" He searched my eyes with a crease between his own.

Indifferent, I said, "Nothing new. No light, no dark. Just me and the trees."

"And that troubles you?" He took my hand and tugged me towards the house.

"Yes. I guess it does. It's peaceful, but I wanted . . ." I slowed down and sighed. There wasn't any point in talking about this again.

His hand tightened around mine and he said, "I know, babe. I want the same thing, but--"

"Just stop. I won't give up on him. I can't!"

He stopped so abruptly I ran into him. He squeezed my shoulders, and said, "I'm not asking you to give up on him, Mica! We all want him back. It's just been so long now. I don't know what to think anymore. No one has any answers." He cupped my face in one of his big paws, and added more gently, "I wish I could take away your pain."

I rubbed my cheek against his hand and leaned into his chest. How had I ever thought he was cold?

# Acknowledgements!

Thank you, Taylor! You gave up valuable Xbox time to listen to me agonize over choreographing fights without rolling your eyes. Your patience and encouragement gave me wings and kept me focused. I am truly blessed to have you as a son. And, yes, I'll put you in one of my books!

Many, many thanks to the creative genius behind the beautiful cover art, Angela Bauer. Her vision and creativity captured the essence of Primani more perfectly than I could have imagined. I will always be grateful for her help.

Thank you to my friends and family who encouraged me to keep writing. Special love and kisses to those who read the drafts and gave me feedback. Mom, Julie, Julia, Annie, David, Jessie, Angela, Angela, Angela (really, there are three!).

I'd like to also acknowledge my favorite Austin, Texas cover band, Encore: John, Cherry, David, David, and Ken. They provided the inspiration for RockHard! in Dump. If you're ever in Austin, look them up!

Finally, this book wouldn't be the same without all of its quirky characters. They are so talented, they wrote the book themselves! Thanks guys!

# About the Author!

For as long as she can remember, Laurie Olerich has been fascinated with all things paranormal. From the time she was a little girl, her vivid imagination led her on ghost hunting missions with her invisible friend. As an adult, Laurie has evolved that rich fantasy life into a love of travel and exploration that has sent her on expeditions from New England to Rome in search of old cemeteries and underground burial sites. Along with her studies of demonology and angelology, she uses inspiration from her travels to write action-packed urban fantasy and paranormal romance novels full of wickedly sexy characters and creepy places. An unhealthy love of hockey and a 20-year military career give her a penchant for strong men and big guns.

If you'd like to know Laurie better, check out her contact info below. She loves hearing from readers! Sign up for her monthly newsletter for all the latest contests, release dates and special sales and events.

Website: www.laurieolerich.com

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Email: laurie.olerich@gmail.com

