>> James: REGGIE, WHAT COMES
FIRST, NUMBER ONE, ON SATURDAY
PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP GAVE THE
COMMENCEMENT ADDRESS AT WEST
POINT AND TWITTER WENT
ABSOLUTELY BONKERS OVER THIS
SLOW WALK DOWN A RAMP AS HE LEFT
THE STAGE.
♪.
NOW TO BE CLEAR WE DIDN'T ADD
THAT MUSIC.
I KNOW IT MIGHT SEEM LIKE IT,
THOSE FLUTES THOSE FLUTES WERE
MOCKING HIM ALL ON THEIR OWN.
NOW FOR MONTHS PRESIDENT TRUMP
HAS REFUSED TO WEAR A MASK OUT
OF FEAR HE MIGHT LOOK FOOLISH.
AND ALL IT TOOK WAS A SLIGHT
DECLINE TO MAKE HIM LOOK
FOOLISH.
AND OF COURSE THE PRESIDENT
REMAINED COOL AFTER THE VIDEO,
I'M KIDDING, HE WENT TO TWITTER
WRITING THE RAMP THAT I
DESCENDED AFTER MY WEST POINT
COMMENCEMENT SPEECH WAS VERY
LONG AND STEEP, HAD NO HANDRAIL
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY WAS VERY
SLIPPERY.
THE LAST THING I WAS GOING TO DO
WAS FALL FOR THE FAKE NEWS TO
HAVE FUN WITH FINAL TEN FEET A
RAN DOWN TO LEVEL GROUND.
MOMENTUM.
NOW THIS TWEET CREATE MORSE
QUESTIONS THAN IT DOES ANSWERS
LIKE WHY IS THE WORD "FALL" IN
COTAITION MARKS.
TWEETING ABOUT THIS ONLY DRAWS
MORE ATTENTION TO IT.
IT IS LIKE SENDING AN OFFICE
WIDE EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT LINE
THE MUS STARRED STAIN ON MY
SHIRT TODAY.
NOW I HAVE TBHEFER BEEN ON THE
RAMP AT WEST POINT VOI NO IDEA
HOW HARD OR EASY IT IS TO GET UP
AND DOWN, FOR ALL I KNOW TRUMP
COULD BE DOING A BRILLIANT JOB.
THEN I SAW THIS.
NOW TO BE FAIR, PRESIDENT OBAMA
IS A LOT YOUNGER THAN TRUMP.
OH, NEVER MIND, MOMENTUM.
ALL OF THIS OVER A SLOW WALK
DOWN A RAMP WHEN THERE ARE SO
MANY OTHER THINGS TO FOCUS ON
FROM TRUMP'S ADDRESS THIS PAST
WEEKEND, LIKE THE WAY HE DRINKS
WATER.
(APPLAUSE)
I'VE HONESTLY NEVER SEEN ANYBODY
DRINK WATER-- HE DRINKS WATER
LIKE IT'S MAD AT HIM.
THIS IS WHERE HE NEEDS HELP FROM
THE NATIONAL GUARD.
FORGET THE PROTEST.
BUT IT IS AN IMPORTANT REMIND WE
ARE SUMMER COMING ON THAT YOU DO
HAVE TO STAY HYDRATED.
HAVE TO STAY HYDRATED.
♪
♪ SO STAY HYDRATED, EVEN IF YOU
DRINK WATER LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT WATER IS.
REGGIE WHAT IS 1 PLUS ONE.
>> Reggie: TWO.
>> James: TWO, NUMBER-- HAD TO
THINK ABOUT IT.
NUMBER TWO, THIS SINCE
QUARANTINE STARTED LIFE HAS
REALLY SLOWED DOWN FOR A LOT OF
US.
AND IT HAS REALLY, REALLY SLOWED
DOWN FOR OTHERS.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHY HE DOES
THIS.
>> James: THIS ATTITUDE
TOWARDS THE WORLD MAKES MORE
SENSE WHEN YOU REMEMBER HE SPENT
LIKE AN 1/8 OF HIS ENTIRE LIFE
IN QUARANTINE.
HE REALLY TOOK HIS SWEET TIME
GETTING DOWN THAT THAT SLIDE.
I HAVEN'T SEEN ANYTHING THAT
SLOW AND AWKWARD SINCE-- .
♪ REGGIE, WHAT IS NEXT.
>> Reggie: I'M GOING TO GO FOR
THREE.
>> James: NUMBER THREE, NOW
FIEMENTLY DESPITE SEEING PEOPLE
IF PUBLIC WHO AREN'T WEARING
MASKS, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC IS
STILL HAPPENING.
BUT THERE ARE MOMENTS THAT WE
CAN CELEBRATE LIKE WHEN JOYCE
AND DON A COUPLE WHO HAVE BEEN
MARRIED FOR 67 YEARS WERE
REUNITED AFTER BEING SEPARATED
FOR FIVE WEEKS DUE TO COVID.
>> LOOK AT ALL THE PEOPLE.
OH, OH, NO WAY.
OH.
OH, HONEY.
>> DO YOU WANT TO GIVE HIM A
HUG.
I WILL HELP YOU.
>> OH HONEY.
>> YOU THINK I'M AN OLD MAN NOW.
BEAUTIFUL SO WONDERFUL, YOU LOOK
SO WONDERFUL.
ARE YOU SO BEAUTIFUL.
YOU LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL.
EVERYBODY WANTED TO SEE YOU.
OH, BEAUTIFUL, OH MY.
>> James: THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED
67 YEARS.
PUT THAT IN PERSPECTIVE, JANUARY
2020 WAS 67 YEARS AGO.
THAT WAS THREE THINGS.
THREE THINGS.
