So the thing is...
Right before we started, they told me
that I'm not getting paid for this gig
 
I'm obviously not pleased
so if I can't make you laugh...
I don't really care
Stand-up is not easy enough to be considered volunteer work
 
takes a lot of effort
you need to read a lot, research,
keep up with the news
Of course these days,
Yogi (an ascetic) is appointed chief minister
and Baba (guru) an industrialist
by Baba, I don't mean father
my father has now retired
 
But now that these men have picked alternate professions
my research has become easier
funny material is readily available
To be honest, even I use Patanjali (baba's products)
This one, for eg.
is Patanjali Indica Skincare
It's the new pack
They don't call it a soap, they call it 'body cleanser'
 
Body Cleanser:
To enhance the natural beauty
And glow of skin
The packet also says
 
'For best results,
rub on body surface while taking bath'
I didn't know there was another way to do it
They've told me to gift it to one lucky viewer, so...
 
 
You look like you need it
They also produce Patanjali Biscuits
This one is their Milk Biscuit line
0% white flour,
0%  transfat
and 100% wheat
Basically, there's nothing delicious here
I'm also to give this to a viewer
But I don't know if there will even be 
dinner after the show
So I'll keep this one
Patanjali is starting a new line of products
They're making Orange Juice
In Nagpur, obviously
My advice to them would be
name the drink 'Santra'
 
So that those who drink
And those who don't
will both buy it
Another place
 
Where a lot of research fetches material for comedy
is the internet
 
 
And the funniest website there, (I believe)
is youporn.com
Hands down!
 
You would think
what is so funny about YouPorn
I mean, the actors are great!
 
But their writing..!
Their scenarios for example -
The kind of stuff they come up with
people like us will never think of
Brilliant!
Like tell me
Why would a beautiful woman
attractive and with tattoos
open the main door of her house
in only her undergarments?
And for a plumber, at that!
 
Like, she knew who was showing up
 
It's not like he dropped by just to say hello?
'I was just passing by...'
'I thought let me check on madam'
'wouldn't mind a cup of tea'
 
I would like to ask the writers this -
 
What if it was somebody other than the plumber?
What if it was her mum?
 
What would've she said?
Mom!
I thought it was the Plumber Dada (brother)
 
