MARIO: Zzzzzzzz.
LUIGI: Peach has been captured by Bowser again!
MARIO: Can you knock first?! I could have been naked! Luckily this happens basically everyday now…. Okay, we’ll go save the princess!
LUIGI: ...Wanna get breakfast first?
MARIO: Sure.
LUIGI: How do we go through these again?
MARIO: You just jump in.
MARIO: Ah, you scared me! NOT COOL!
LUIGI: Did you really have to yell at it?
MARIO: IT’S CALLED DOMINANCE. I’M PLAYER ONE.
MARIO: Woah, be careful of these Koopa’s, bro!
MARIO: Okay, yeah, never mind. Oh look, here comes another one. This will be easy!
LUIGI: Argh!
MARIO: Brother!
LUGI: Make… a game… about me….
MARIO: I’ll avenge you, brother!
PEACH: Mario! You saved me!
BOWSER: Not so fast, Mario! You’ll have to defeat me first! Mwhaha! ...again.
MARIO: Can we skip all this already?! We’ve done this, like, 10 times now. I save Peach. Then you capture her again. Then I rescue her. I’m getting bored of this….
BOWSER: Look, I… I didn’t realize you felt that way…. I thought it was fun….
MARIO It’s not funny! It’s really annoying, actually! I have a job, you know?! I haven’t worked as a plumber in forever! Can’t we race in go-karts or something?
BOWSER: That seems problematic.
MARIO: How about on a big game board?
BOWSER: Unrealistic.
MARIO: Ugh, okay, fine!
BOWSER: Argh!
PEACH: My hero!
MARIO: If you get captured again I’m hanging out with Yoshi.
PEACH: Help! Helppppp! … Mario?? Hello?
MARIO: Okay, okay, if I win, YOU go and save the princess. Deal?
YOSHI: Yoshiiii!
