 
Superkid and the Clone

By A. E. Lucky

Copyright 2014 A. E. Lucky

Smashwords Edition

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Table of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1: Dr. Red's Invention

Chapter 2: The Superkid Duplicate's Journey

Chapter 3: It Returns

Chapter 4: The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 1

Chapter 4: The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 2

Chapter 4: The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 3

Chapter 5: The Troubles Begin

Chapter 6: The Test

Chapter 7: Double Trouble

Chapter 8: The True Clone

Chapter 9: The Kid, the Clone, and Him

Chapter 10: The Clone's Farewell

Epilogue

Introduction

Welcome back to another exciting episode of Superkid! The amazing twelve-year-old who battles monsters, mad scientists, vampires, and black belt ninjas!

Okay, so there's only one monster (the giant spider), one mad scientist (Dr. Red), one vampire (the Vampire), and one black belt ninja (the Black Belt), but it's still exciting! It _is_ the third edition after all.

If this is the first time you've heard the name Superkid I've got to ask, _where have you been?_

Don't answer that.

The point is this is the third edition of Superkid's adventures and I strongly recommend reading the first two editions first: _Superkid_ and _Superkid and the Vampire's Revenge_.

But if you have read the first two already and this is indeed the third edition you're reading then keep on reading! For I now conclude this introduction and teleport us right into the action!

Chapter 1

Dr. Red's Invention

You remember Dr. Red, right? He fought Superkid in the first edition, accidentally poisoned him with powers (I don't call them "superpowers" because, well... they're not really all that super), and then was chased off so that he could battle our hero some other day. Then in the second edition we found him working on an evil invention that was to be Superkid's doom! And at the very end, we heard him say these dire words:

"What shall I test the machine on?" These were the words that sent chills down your spine and made you eager for the sequel, right?

What! What do you mean 'no'? Why else would you be reading this if not for the thrill of Superkid's battle with Dr. Red's diabolical machine?

Don't answer that.

The previous story ended with the evil doctor wondering what to test his machine on. And this story begins where the previous left off. Dr. Red combed the old abandoned factory for some kind of creature to test his monster-maker on. But the building wasn't called old and abandoned for nothing—excepting present company. Even the spiders had vacated the premises, but they had generously left their cobwebs behind for anyone who needed them. Since he couldn't find anything inside, the diabolical doctor stepped outside into the hot, dusty desert. He squinted into the sagebrush that grew in clusters all around the building. Seeing nothing, he stepped forward.

A small lizard shot forward, grabbing his attention. It skittered a few paces and then stopped and turned to look at Doctor Red.

"Hello, my timid, little friend." The doctor grinned. He pulled out a jar that he used specially for capturing little critters. He crept closer, lowering his body slowly so he wouldn't scare it away.

"Now hold still," said the malevolent doctor, "while I..."

Suddenly he lunged. He slammed the jar onto the ground, causing a cloud of dust to erupt. He coughed as he waved it away. When it cleared, he looked into the jar.

It was empty.

"Curses!" He turned and saw the lizard looking back at him. It flicked its tail back and forth as though it was taunting him.

"You little..." He pounced again. The lizard was gone before the jar landed. The evil doctor turned and saw the lizard looking back at him with its mouth open in a smile—as though it was laughing at him!

"You think you're funny?" Dr. Red snarled at it. "We'll see who's laughing when I stick you in my machine!"

He chased the lizard all over the place. It darted from bush to bush, looking back at the mad doctor and waiting as he crept up to it, only to dart away at the last second when he slammed the jar down. Understandably, the mad doctor only got madder.

After approximately fifteen minutes of cat and mouse, Dr. Red finally had it skittering unhappily in the bottom of the jar. Doctor Red watched it as it tried to scramble up the glass jar only to tip onto its back, and he smiled malevolently.

"It's what you get," he told it, "for making me chase you and for laughing at me!"

Which made sense... somewhat. Making him chase it was only natural because who wants to be trapped in a bottle? But laughing at him—that was just asking for it.

Dr. Red carried the jar with the lizard in it to his machine. Then he stopped and studied the machine with a puzzled frown. He glanced down at the tiny reptile, which stared back pleadingly.

"What do I combine with you?" he asked it. He frowned and cast his eyes around for ideas.

You see, he wanted to be cautious this time. He wanted to look before he leaped. In other words, he wanted to test the machine on something non-threatening in case something went wrong--which was rather pointless since things like this invariably do, but why spoil his fantasy?

He looked down at the lizard in his hand and he spotted his answer.

"Aha!" He reached across and plucked something from his shoulder. "A hair! For the test, I shall combine a lizard and a hair! And together they will create... a hairy lizard!"

He laughed evilly and the lizard cowered in its glass prison. The evil doctor opened the booth of his diabolical machine and tossed the hair in. Then he upended the jar, dumping the lizard so that it fell onto the hair. Before the lizard landed, the evil doctor slammed the booth shut, trapping the poor critter inside. The little reptile scrabbled against the glass door desperately.

"Too late!" Doctor Red laughed. "You are trapped and are about to become... a hairy lizard!"

He stepped in front of a panel full of buttons and poised his finger over a square blue one.

"And now here shall be... monsters!" With a dramatic flourish, he pressed the button.

The enormous machine behind the booth began rumbling to life. Wires began to spark and fizz furiously...

Light flashed up hoses. Rotors spun with noisy sputters. Pistons pumped. Pipes puffed smoke like chimneys. Gears clanked.

The machine got noisier and noisier as everything began going faster and faster. The malevolent doctor had to cover his ears!

The lizard inside the booth scrabbled around in panic. Sparks flew inside the booth like fireworks and a thick blue-gray smoke was rolling in.

The evil doctor felt excitement growing in his chest. "Just listen to the power of this thing!" he yelled above the growing roar of the machine.

The power of the thing was beginning to shake it apart just then. Bits and pieces began to fly off. Wires fell buzzing to the floor. A puffing pipe clattered onto the concrete very close to the doctor and one bolt zinged past his ear like a bullet, making him duck and cry aloud in surprise.

The booth where the lizard was still trapped was shaking so hard it was sliding forward. The wires, pipes, and hoses that were still attached to it were doing their best to hold it back but it wasn't a safe bet that they would hold on very long. If that monster-maker destroyed itself before making a monster, it could be disastrous to the story! What would Superkid fight then?

Don't answer that one either.

Doctor Red watched his machine nervously and had to restrain himself from stopping it too soon. He didn't want to stop it if it was close to creating his monster!

But when another bolt zinged straight through his lab coat, leaving a gaping hole the size of a gopher, he decided it was time to intervene. He lifted his arm over his head and stumbled toward the roaring machine as though fighting a hurricane—which, come to think of it, is actually a pretty good description: big like a hurricane, loud like a hurricane, and with things flying all over the place like a hurricane. But just as he got to its eye and raised his finger to flip the switch, the machine stopped. The wires stopped sparking, the lights stopped flashing, the rotors stopped spinning, the pipes stopped puffing, and the gears stopped clanking—and if you stop rolling your eyes, we'll complete the list.

Doctor Red slowly and cautiously straightened himself and slowly and apprehensively turned to the booth. He couldn't see inside the thing. Bluish-gray smoke completely filled it up.

He slowly approached it. Then, he slowly reached for the handle. After that, he slowly gripped it. And when he had slowly done that, he slowly popped it open and then ever-so-sloooowly pulled it wide (the suspense is killing me!)...

The blue-gray smoke rolled out and crashed over the evil doctor. He waved it away, coughing, and then peered into the gloom, preparing himself for the scare that was sure to come.

He jumped at a skittering sound at his feet. He looked down and saw a lizard—the lizard—skitter over his shoe. It looked back as though it was waiting for something. Then the malevolent doctor jumped again when a second lizard skittered out and joined the first. Then together they skittered off. Neither of them were hairy.

"What the?" The evil doctor watched them leave, perplexed. He had tried to create a hairy lizard and instead he got two non-hairy lizards. What went wrong?

Then he heard a shuffling sound behind him. The hairs on the back of his neck pricked up. He didn't quite dare turn and yet he had that irrepressible urge to do just that. And don't bother to scream at him, "Don't turn! Just run!" because he can't hear you and because that would just make you scream later, "What was it? Tell me! Tell me!"

Giving in to that irrepressible urge—but still influenced by his more cowardly side—he slowly turned to face whatever it was that was shuffling toward him.

There was still a bit of smoke but the diabolical doctor could just make out a vague figure... a human shape... a short human shape. It shuffled forward, stumbled and caught itself on the door frame. A hand went to its head.

Dr. Red's heart pounded in anticipation. What was it? What sort of abomination had he created?

He watched it stumble out of the booth. The smoke rolled out of the booth, obscuring the figure but quickly dissipating. The figure took one last step and was fully revealed.

Dr. Red screamed. He shielded his eyes and cried, "Not again!"

His creation spoke. "W-where am I...? What am I...? Wait. Doctor Red! What are you..." And then it screamed and cried, "What happened to me? What did you do to me? _Where are my clothes?_ "

Dr. Red, still shielding his eyes, replied, "Uh—wait right there. I'm going to—get you some clothes... don't move!" Then he turned and ran across the old, abandoned factory toward the locker room. He burst inside and looked wildly around for clothes. He snatched a pair of coveralls and dashed out again to where his creation was waiting by his machine. He readied to shut his eyes as soon as he saw his creation.

His creation was hunched over, trying to hide itself behind a metal strut. The evil doctor shut his eyes and hurled the coveralls at his creation. He kept his eyes shut as he heard his creation pick up the coveralls with the sound of a scraping of brass buttons on concrete. There was a pause, and then his creation demanded, "Where are my clothes?"

"Those were the only clothes I could find," Dr. Red answered.

His creation demanded again as though repeating its question, "What did you do with my clothes?"

"Nothing; I never had them."

" _What—happened—to—them?_ " his creation demanded a third time, stressing each word.

"I DON'T KNOW! JUST PUT THOSE ON!"

At last, the malicious doctor heard rustling denim. His creation grunted a few times. The metal buttons and hooks jangled. Then there was a sound of a zipper going up.

"You done?" Red asked.

His creation didn't answer. Immediately suspicious, the malevolent doctor took the chance and peeked.

His creation was trying to sneak away. It was holding its pant legs up to keep from tripping over the baggy hems as it tiptoed across the concrete.

"Where do you think you're going?" Doctor Red growled as his eyes flew open.

His creation gave a cry and then sprinted off. It didn't get far though. It tripped over those baggy legs and fell onto the floor with an "oof!" Doctor Red ran up to it and planted his foot on its back.

"You're not going anywhere," he growled triumphantly.

"So what're you going to do, you psychopath?" his creation yelled defiantly as it struggled.

Red paused thoughtfully. "I don't know yet. I'm trying to decide how to make you useful."

"Why don't you just kill me? I'm never going to serve you! You kidnapped me and stole my costume!"

"Kidnapped?" the doctor sputtered. "Stolen your...? No, you don't know what you're talking about! Don't you know what you are?"

"What I am? I don't know what your diabolical experiments did to me, but I know I'm still Superkid!"

Red huffed in frustration and then growled, "No, you're not Superkid! You're a clone!"

His creation stopped struggling and tried to turn to give his evil creator a look of surprise. "A clone?" he said in shock.

"Yes, a replicate of my enemy," said Doctor Red. Then the implication of this fact hit him and he chuckled maliciously. "Which means that I can use you to find out his strengths and weaknesses and ultimately defeat him!" At this, he threw out his arms and laughed. It threw him off balance though, so his foot came off of the clone's back. This gave the clone a chance to jump to his feet.

When the maniacal doctor stopped laughing, he pondered aloud to himself, "That must have been Superkid's hair I tossed into the machine, which—of course!" He slammed his fist into his palm. "That's why there were two lizards! I've created a clone-maker!"

"So that's your evil plan!" cried the clone, pointing his finger at the startled doctor. "You've created a clone of me to take my place so that he can carry out whatever evil plan you cooked up! And that's where my costume went! You stole it off of me and gave it to your evil creation!"

The evil doctor blinked at the clone in surprise. "Wha..."

"And meanwhile, you were going to experiment on me! Change me into a monster! Make me evil! Make me a mindless zombie! Whatever evil plan your deranged mind thought up! But now I'm free! I'm going to find that clone and stop him! Then I'll come and deal with you—stop your evil once and for all!"

"Now wait a minute!" Doctor Red cried. "You're not getting it! You're the clone! You're supposed to be evi..."

But the clone wasn't listening. It ran to the machine and looked up at it.

"Doesn't mean I can't cripple you for a while," it said and heaved on the booth with all of its might. With a metallic groan, the booth tipped over, ripping wires and upon impact shattering the glass. Before Dr. Red could register what had happened, the clone dashed away, crashed through the front door and disappeared. The evil doctor stood there, blinking dumbfounded.

"He left me," he finally said. "My evil creation left me! To stop the evil of his so-called evil clone! He's crazy! I can only imagine what will happen when he meets himself..."

He blinked. Then an evil smile spread slowly across his face.

"When he meets himself, he'll fight him, so it doesn't matter. Evil or not, that clone will do exactly what he's supposed to do!" His laugh echoed throughout the factory, rattling the windows with its evil power.

Then he paused as a thought struck him. "But if he succeeds, then he'll be back. Back to 'stop my evilness once and for all'."

A cocky grin reappeared on his face. "Which means I'd better prepare some weapons. Wouldn't be much of a job for him if I didn't at least try to destroy him." And with one last evil chuckle, he went to work.

Chapter 2

The Superkid Duplicate's Journey

The clone had stopped just long enough to steal the map in the glove compartment of the skeletal car parked outside the old abandoned factory. He was now a fair distance from the factory, studying the map in an attempt to locate himself.

"Let's see, my house is somewhere right here..." he murmured and tapped the dot labeled "Poolington." "And I'm somewhere right..." His finger zigzagged over the map until he finally realized that he had no idea where he was. Whoever had drawn the map (Doctor Red) had terrible mapmaking skills. With a disgusted grunt, the clone tossed the map.

"I guess my only choice is to keep going until I reach civilization. From there I should be able to find my way home."

He glanced up at the sky. It was cloudless but pale. The sun glared down at him like an oven light-bulb, baking the desert and him to a golden-brown. The clone turned up the collar of his overlarge overalls and began trudging down the road.

It was about five hours of miserable trudging before he reached a town. It was just getting dark so there weren't many people outside. But he was tired, thirsty and footsore and he desperately wanted a place to stay. So he picked a house at random and knocked on the door.

It was answered by a kind-looking Mexican woman. One look at him and she exclaimed, " _¡Oh! ¡Pobrecito!_ Are you lost, dear?

"Yes," the clone answered. "Could you point me to Poolington?"

"Poolington?" the woman said. "It's that way." She pointed down the street and then turned back to him. "But it's too far to walk there. I will take you there tomorrow. Come, you can stay here tonight. _Mi casa es su casa."_

"Thanks," said the clone. After a long day of walking barefoot on hot pavement and hot sand, he was grateful for any amount of comfort. He planned to first take a shower but this was derailed when he was discovered by the three little ones--Rodriguez, Juan, and Suzy--who were bouncing with excitement to meet him.

"What's your name?" Rodriguez asked, tugging on the clone's coveralls.

"Are you an orphan?" Juan inquired.

"Can we keep him?" said Suzy, turning to her mother with her hands clasped together.

"Now, now, _mis hijos_ ," their _madré_ said. "He's just staying for the night. I'm taking him to Poolington in the morning."

"He can sleep in my bed!" exclaimed Rodriguez.

While the family sorted out the details of who would share what, the clone snuck off to shower. In the middle of his shower though he was interrupted by a knock on the door and the voice of Juan saying, "I brought you some clothes, orphan! I'll leave it outside the door." Which is where he found them when he got out. They were a little small, unfortunately. His belly button showed and his ankles felt like they were losing circulation, but he appreciated the gesture nonetheless. He appreciated more the box dinner of seasoned rice since he couldn't remember the last time he had eaten—which of course he wouldn't since he had been created that morning. He couldn't remember the last time he had slept so comfortably either. His feet barely hung over the end of Rodriguez's bed.

There was an advantage to being the shortest kid his age.

The next morning, as she promised, the nice Mexican lady drove him the twenty-five miles to Poolington. She asked him as they entered town, "Where's your house?"

"I'll show you," the clone answered. He guided her down the streets. But when they were about three houses away from his house (or what he believed was his house since he wasn't the actual Superkid) he told her, "Right here."

So she pulled into the driveway. The clone told her as he unbuckled himself and opened the door, "Thanks for the ride. And for letting me stay at your house last night."

" _Es nada_ ," she replied.

The clone jumped out of the car and shut the door. He waved to her. She leaned out the window.

"I don't mean to pry, but how did you get so far away from home?"

The clone pondered his answer. At last he told her, "Let's just say there was a mix-up at the doctor's office."

"If you say so," said the woman, perplexed. Then she waved him goodbye and drove back home. The clone watched her leave until she was far into the distance. Then he turned to the house two yards down (that is, two expanses of grass) and narrowed his eyes determinedly.

"Now, to deal with that clone."

Chapter 3

It Returns

You're probably wondering what the real Superkid was up to at this point. Well, not much, really. At the time the clone was getting into the car that the nice Mexican lady was taking him to Poolington in, the real Superkid was taking a shower. By the time the clone and the nice Mexican lady were halfway to Poolington, the real Superkid was riding the bus to school with his best friends Derrick Moorn and Darrin Snoll. And when the nice Mexican lady dropped off the clone three blocks from his house, the real Superkid was in class, ready to learn.

If only there was a more efficient way to tell two stories at the same time. Then you could really get an idea of what events were unfolding simultaneously and not have to jump back and forth in time to straighten everything out. If only stories could do that...

Could they do that?

You know something? I think I'll try it! All right everyone. Stand back. I'm going to attempt something never before done in the history of literature—tell two stories on the same page! Here goes!

Well, what do you think? Pretty revolutionary, eh? Two stories at the same time! I should probably get a patent on this thing. I mean, I can just see stories popping up everywhere, telling multiple stories on the same page...

A headache? What do you mean a headache? Reading two stories on the same page is confusing?

Oh all right. I'll keep it as one story. But I'm telling you, they're going to be calling me a revolutionist when I'm gone! And you're going to be seeing my idea everywhere someday! And then you'll be sorry you put me down like this!

Okay, the clone first.

He was glad to be able to get out of the baggy coveralls and into more comfortable clothes—relatively speaking since he was still suffering from a sunburn. But that was a minor discomfort. Right now, he had to find out what giant was stomping around and causing his house to shake. And he had better be quick because the shaking was actually fading.

He rushed outside. He looked around for that giant. What he found instead was a long skinny shadow traveling along the ground from his house to the next house. He looked up and discovered what it was making the shadow, and it was rather curious.

It was some sort of rope stretched over his house. It was wound around the chimney of the neighbor's house and then continued on beyond the clone's vision. Aside from being so long and thick, the rope was white and silky.

Something tugged at the edge of the clone's memory. And then it yanked his memory to the center stage with such force that it actually made him stagger backwards with a gasp.

"It's returned!" he cried with exasperation. "Oh, why did it have to pick now of all times to return? First my clone and now this!"

He narrowed his eyes determinedly. "But first and foremost must be the safety of the town. I can deal with the clone later. Right now I must find out what that monster is up to and stop it."

A worthy answer of a true hero. Kind of makes you wonder if he really is the clone, doesn't it?

Meanwhile, back in Mrs. Nophun's class, Derrick was about to initiate an experiment to see at what point of boredom a kid could fall asleep in a hard and uncomfortable desk. He came very close to discovering it, but then he was interrupted when the windows rattled.

Derrick sat up with a rather ungracious snort. He barely had time to turn to the windows to see if he had only imagined it when they rattled again.

Derrick wheeled to Aaron and poked him. "Hey, Aaron. Look at the windows. They're shaking."

He was surprised to see Aaron was already looking around in befuddlement. Then Derrick discovered that everyone was looking around the classroom, including Mrs. Nophun.

"What is that?" the teacher exclaimed.

"Maybe they're building something," a girl suggested.

"That wouldn't shake the entire school," sneered a boy.

"Maybe it's a washer," said another, who was rather dim. "Our house shakes all the time when the washer's going."

Everyone laughed. The contemptuous boy sneered again, "The school doesn't have a washer, you dope!"

"But I did see one in the school!" the dim-witted boy protested above the roar of laughter. "Behind the cafeteria!"

Derrick laughed and whooped along with the class. He whacked Aaron on the back.

"Chase needs to shut up before he falls too far back, huh Aaron?" He snickered and whacked Aaron on the back again. Aaron winced but continued to glace around the room.

Derrick gave a huff of disgust. "C'mon, Aaron, that was funny! Don't you ever laugh?"

"It sounds like it's getting closer," Aaron replied. He looked toward the hallway. Derrick turned to look too.

Like that stomping giant we discussed previously was getting closer, the rattles got harder and louder. Soon, things were falling from the shelves.

The kids screamed. A girl wailed, "What's going on?"

"It sounds like a giant's outside!" cried the dim-witted kid.

"Shut up, Chase!" sneered the contemptuous kid. "There's no such thing as giants!"

Derrick wasn't so sure about that. It occurred to him that whatever was outside was probably something that only Superkid could deal with, so he turned to his friend. But before he could whisper the name that would transform his friend into the dynamic hero, Aaron murmured in a tone of disbelief, "Is that humming?"

Derrick shut his mouth when he realized Aaron was right! It was humming! A musical humming like a giant humming a tune!

"It's outside!" Aaron yelled. He jumped out of his seat. Derrick reached into his backpack for Superkid's costume but by the time he had pulled it out, Aaron had already gone out the door.

"Nuts," he said as he squirmed out of his seat but then fell onto the floor. He scrambled to his feet and hurried after his friend, the hero's costume sailing behind him like Superkid's own cape.

Derrick found his friend staring up at the school. He tucked the costume behind his back as he stood next to Aaron.

Aaron pointed to the roof. "Look."

Derrick looked. Then his mouth dropped open.

Stretched over the school was a white silk rope that was as thick as a cable. It came in, wrapped around one of the school's projections, and then continued on as far as the eye could see.

The students gathered around Derrick and Aaron to gape. That contemptuous boy—who no longer sounded contemptuous more than he did scared—squeaked in a small voice, "What is that thing?"

Derrick alone had a pretty good idea what it was. And he had a pretty bad feeling about it.

Chapter 4

The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 1

The clone hurried to follow the line and catch up to whatever was attached to it. But that whatever was pretty quick for though he was running as fast as he could, the shaking was getting fainter.

"If I only had my costume, I could just rise into the air and see where it is," muttered the clone. He tried not to think about that imposter parading around in his costume--it only made his blood boil. He concentrated instead on following the silk cable and listening for the whatever that was making the silk cable.

He came to a stop in a square of grass jokingly known to the Poolingtonians as Central Park. Here is where the cable came to a center where dozens of other cables branched out like spokes in a wheel.

"What is that evil thing planning with this?" wondered the clone as he stared up at it. Then he thought, _If I wait here, sooner or later it should come back and then I can catch it by surprise. The only question is... how do I get up there?_ If he had had the Superkid costume, this wouldn't have been a problem. Instead he would have to rely on something else that he had that the imposter could not steal... resourcefulness. One way or another, that clone was going to find a way up there.

Meanwhile, Derrick had decided that it was time for Superkid to come out and save the day. So he leaned close to Aaron's ear and whispered, "Superkid."

Aaron's body convulsed as he made the transformation from boring, 'fraidy-cat Aaron to epic, fearless Superkid. Derrick took the hero's costume from behind his back and handed it to his heroic friend.

"What's going on?" Superkid asked as he took the costume.

Derrick pointed. Superkid looked up and saw the enormous length of silk rope. He followed it down both ends, his eyes widening.

"This looks big," he said. "I wonder what that ugly thing is up to?" He then answered himself, "I'll just have to float up there and find out." And with that, he ran for the nearest dressing room--with the town being as small as it was, there wasn't a handy telephone booth nearby to change in. Nevertheless, he soon emerged in costume, ready to battle evil.

Step number one in thwarting this particular menace was to locate it. The most effective way to accomplish this was to blow up his cape that doubled as a hot-air balloon, float up, and look around. So that's what he did.

Almost immediately he spotted it. It was actually pretty hard to miss. And missing it might have been healthier for his mind because that menace was moving away from him. Which meant that--unless the menace had decided to walk backwards--our diminutive hero had glimpsed a lovely view of its rear end.

On the bright side, he knew which direction to take when he got back to the ground. He told Derrick, "Better go get Darrin. I've got a lead and I'm going to chase it down." And so saying, he immediately took off down the street.

Meanwhile, the Superkid duplicate was making do without the Superkid costume in his attempt to climb up to the white ropes. This involved climbing an apple tree--and being careful not to destroy any of the blossoms--then leaping to the roof, Spiderman style, and finally balancing on two of the spokes in that rope wheel--one of which had actually been wrapped around a swamp cooler--while crossing to the hub. When he made it to the center, he thought, _Now all I have to do is wait._

He didn't have to wait very long. In fact, it was only about four seconds longer than it takes some heroes to get into their Hero-mobiles via the transition scene. The ropes he was balanced on began to quiver as a colossal figure appeared from behind the Poolington Museum. This figure was humming some sort of tune as it approached. There was also some booty-shaking going on, if that wasn't bad enough. To make matters worse, the figure was moving backwards--booty-first towards the clone (maybe Superkid hadn't seen its rear end after all). And for those of you brave enough to keep reading, from this booty came the white silk ropes that the clone was balanced on.

Our brave hero's replicate hunched down, tensing himself to spring onto the figure's bulbous backside. He figured he would take the figure by surprise though what he planned to do while hanging onto the backside of the figure while balanced atop some silky tightropes weaved into a net-like pattern is beyond me.

Why am I being so evasive, you ask? You already know who the enigmatic figure is and what the mysterious network of silk ropes is? I'm just waiting for the right moment! For the big reveal! It's no fun if you reveal it too soon, even if all the evidence points to the obvious!

Anyway, that mysterious figure with that unquantifiable-sized backside slowly approached the Superkid duplicate backwards, laying down that enigmatic silk rope onto that indeterminate network of silk ropes all the while. The Superkid duplicate waited for the right moment... and then jumped!

Have you ever tried to jump forward while standing on a net hanging thirty feet above the ground? It's not easy, let me tell you. And unfortunately for the clone, the very moment he tensed to jump, the figure spun around and faced him. What happened then was that not only did the clone fail to get any height but he also slammed face-first into the figure's face.

The figure gasped in pain and then rubbed a leg across its face. "What was that for?"

"It's how we superheroes say hello to vermin like you," the clone responded, who was rubbing his own face in pain.

"Is that so?" the figure growled. "Then allow me to extend you the courtesy of saying hello... as vermin do to superheroes!" And then it shook the net, sending the clone flying into the air. When he came back down, the figure kicked him, sending him bouncing down the net.

"How's that for a hello?" the figure chuckled.

Our hero's duplicate was trying to recover his breath so he couldn't answer. He coughed as he pushed himself onto his back.

The figure crawled toward him. "Say, something's different about you... wait, I got it! You have a new costume!

"New nothing!" snapped the clone after expelling one last cough. "My costume was stolen!"

"Stolen?!" gasped this enigmatic being who we still know little about. "And they call me a monster! I was so counting on you having your costume. You see, I have some new moves to show off."

"Like what?"

"Like 'the Tarzan' and 'the Spider Drop' and--my favorite--" the figure rubbed its appendages together, "the Trampoline."

"The Trampoline?" The clone looked about at all the netting they were standing on and his eyes grew wide.

The still-enigmatic being chuckled and said, "I think you can see where I'm going with this. But I'll be a good sport. I'll give you a ten-second head start. One... two..."

The clone grumbled to himself as he began rocking futilely on the oh-so-mysterious netting to get back to his feet, "I really wish I had my costume right now."

"Threefourfivesixseveneightnineten!" that dastardly but also still mysterious being finished and then grabbed the netting in both, uh, forelimbs and flicked it like your mother flicks your bed sheets with all those cookie crumbs on them, sending the clone tumbling high into the air.

The mysterious being yelled with glee with each bounce of the clone, "Bouncy...! Bouncy...! Bouncy...!" Then when the clone landed this time, the being sang, "Now we bounce to the left..." and flicked the netting to send the clone flying to the left. "...And we bounce to the right..." The being flicked the netting again, sending the clone flying to the right.

"And we bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce all through the night!"

That clone bounced helplessly around in that silk net. Several times he reflexively reached for the little hose dangling over his shoulder so that he could blow hot air into his cape and rise out of there--then he remembered he wasn't wearing his cape!

"Stupid... evil... no-good... dirty... rotten..." the clone cursed. He could have been referring to this diabolical fiend bouncing him around in a silk-cable netting, but he was actually referring to the original Superkid whom he thought was the clone. He was trying his best to catch himself when he felt himself land, but he was bouncing too fast. Everything was a blur! He was changing directions before he even realized it!

And then he was bounced high into the air. That diabolical villain followed his flight with beady eyes. With its head turned up, it didn't see another kid floating beside it. But it did feel something land on the netting and it wasn't the kid it had sent into the air. It looked down. Then its mouth dropped and its eyes bugged out and it stammered, "Y-you! No! How?"

"Remember me?" demanded the kid.

This still unidentified villain gaped down at him. Then it looked up at the kid falling back down. And then it looked down again.

"How is that possible?" it gasped.

Whew! Keeping up a veil of mystery is exhausting! But I haven't found the right moment for the big reveal yet! It has to be perfect! And anyways, who's the narrator here?

Allow me to rewind a bit here to see what the real Superkid was doing meanwhile. Of course, if you hadn't insisted that reading two stories at the same time gave you a headache, I could've saved you half the time.

Chasing down the villain creating the silk cable network was a little trickier than Superkid had originally thought. For one thing, he had houses to navigate around and the cables ran right over them, so he couldn't follow the cables straight on. And for another thing, the villain changed direction quicker than Superkid could check on the villain's progress. And it didn't help that Derrick was calling his name, asking where he had gone to. He did eventually allow Derrick--with Darrin in tow--to catch up to him at the cost of giving the villain a five-minute head start. But he figured that Darrin might be able to help him by giving him ideas about how to catch up to that enigmatic and evil villain who wielded giant silk cables.

Darrin and Derrick came panting up to Superkid's side. Darrin gasped, "Did you catch it yet?"

"Not yet," Superkid answered as he looked up at one of the cables trailing overhead and disappearing behind a house.

"What do you think that big, evil spider is up to?" Derrick asked... at the most anticlimactic time! This wasn't supposed to be the big reveal! Leave it to Derrick to ruin it for everyone! He really can be a pain sometimes. One of these stories, something's going to happen to Derrick...

Oh well, it was getting exhausting keeping up the veil of mystery anyways. And you already knew who it was long before then, so no real harm done.

So with that rather cumbersome veil of mystery pulled back, Superkid responded to Derrick's question, "No doubt, nothing good."

"You don't think it's trying to trap us all in town?" Darrin murmured.

"The web is on top of the town," Superkid answered. "If it's trying to trap everyone in town, then it's going about it the wrong way."

"Well, what is it building a giant web for?" Derrick cried, throwing his hands into the air.

"Maybe it's to get my attention," Superkid said. "Well, it's got it. Now I just need to track it down and kick that enormous butt out of town. If you'll excuse me." He grabbed the tiny hose dangling over his shoulder and blew into it. His cape expanded and lifted him into the air above the web the giant spider had weaved. After a while, he came back down, beckoned his friends with his arm, said, "This way!" and charged down the street. With a weary sigh from Derrick, the two of them chased after him.

Superkid rose into the air and then came back down a few times as he tracked that giant, villainous spider. By that time, Derrick had accrued a sizable amount of ailments: two flat feet, a twisted spine, a pounding migraine, a sharp pain in the ribs, a ravenous appetite, and a swollen tongue... fortunately, none of them were contagious. The only thing that his two friends suffered from was his loud complaining.

Darrin groaned, "Derrick. Will you just shut up for one minute... please?"

Derrick protested, "But I'm dying here!" Then he sighed, "Couldn't that ugly bug just do something less evil for once and just come to us?"

"Quiet!" Superkid commanded.

"But..."

"I said, HUSH!"

That's when Derrick noticed that Superkid was pressed against the wall at the corner of Poolington Mart as though hiding from something. Then he looked past the corner and saw an enormous shadow with eight spindly legs spread over Central Park. He gulped and leaped behind his heroic friend. Darrin joined him--with a little more dignity.

"What's the plan?" Darrin asked.

"I'll sneak up on it and see if I can find out what that spider is planning," Superkid replied. "Who knows, maybe it'll start randomly talking to itself while I'm there, revealing its diabolical plot. Wait here."

He started forward, watching the shadow so that he could be sure to stay behind the colossal crawler. He looked up at the web suspended above the park and saw the giant spider... and what he saw made him freeze.

That giant spider was talking... not to itself as Superkid had expected, but to someone on the web with it.

_Who is that?_ Superkid wondered. _Some unfortunate victim? But then wouldn't that victim be screaming for help? Maybe it's a partner of that creepy crawler. Maybe... Doctor Red?_

Then Superkid heard the person's voice become angry. After that, the spider spoke in a voice of mock sorrow.

_I ought to get closer_ , thought our diminutive hero and blew up his cape. He rose slowly so as to be careful in coming up and not get spotted eavesdropping. As he approached, he heard the spider say "...be a good sport. I'll give you a ten-second head start. One... two..."

_Uh-oh_ , thought our hero. _If that really is some unfortunate victim..._ He squinted at the victim to see if he could recognize him. If it was Dr. Red that he had thought about rushing in to rescue, he would probably be running into a trap. But our hero wasn't yet close enough to really see him--not to mention the webbing kind of got in the way. Superkid thought about yelling to get the person's attention so then he could see who it was, but then the spider yelled, "threefourfivesixseveneightnineten!" and then the person went flying into the air.

"Nuts," said our diminutive hero. He raised the hose at his shoulder to his mouth, preparing to blow hot air into his cape, then he realized that the webbing was too tightly weaved together to allow him through. He was going to have to find a spot with a gap large enough for him to slip through. So he pulled the hose, which released the air in his balloon-cape and dropped him to the ground. Then he hurried away to find that sizable gap.

"Did you find out what it's planning?" Darrin asked as Superkid ran past.

"It's got someone and its torturing him. I've got to hurry up there and save him."

"Who's it got?" Derrick asked curiously.

Superkid skidded to a stop at an intersection, looked both ways, and then took off down the left street before he answered "I couldn't see him very well. But it kind of looked like... a kid."

"The poor guy must be pretty scared," Darrin remarked, almost running into Superkid when he skidded to a stop again.

"Actually," said Superkid, turning to give his friends a puzzled look, "the kid didn't seem all that scared. He was actually yelling at the spider."

"Maybe he thinks he's you. You know, a superhero," said Derrick.

Superkid had been about to take off, but then he turned to Derrick with a bemused expression on his face. "You think that he's a fanboy?"

Derrick shrugged. "Every superhero has one. Some kid who wants to be exactly like his favorite superhero, so he dresses up like him and goes around thinking he's fighting crime until he gets into a fight with bad guys, and then it's his favorite hero who has to come and save him..."

"Right," Superkid interrupted and turned his face up. After making a critical face, he said, "This looks like a good place to get through the web. All right, you two. Stand back." Once his friends obeyed, Superkid took the hose dangling over his shoulder and blew hot air into it. His cape expanded into a balloon and he rose into the air.

His judgment proved true. The gap in the webbing was wide enough so he was able to rise through. He then pulled the hose at his shoulder and the air in his balloon rushed out of the vents in his back, pushing him toward the gigantic arachnid torturing the reality-checked fanboy. He blew air into the hose to keep the propulsion going until he drifted in front of the monstrous spider.

The spider had its head turned up so it didn't see our short hero. Superkid released the remaining air in his balloon and dropped onto the web. This attracted the villainous critter's attention. It looked down. Then its mouth dropped open, its eyes bugged out and it stammered, " Y-you! No! How?"

"Remember me?" Superkid demanded.

The giant spider rocked its head up and down as it looked up at its victim and then down at our hero and then up at the victim again and finally back to its nemesis.

"How is that possible?"

Chapter 4

The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 2

"How is that possible?!" the spider roared.

"How is what possible?" Superkid asked in puzzlement. "You act like you weren't expecting me."

Before the dastardly behemoth could answer, its victim came down yelling, distracting both it and our hero. The kid slammed into the web, pitching Superkid forward. The kid bounced up and smacked the diminutive vigilante in the mouth. Superkid fell backwards, clutching his lip and groaning in pain.

The obsessed fan rolled around the web as he tried to stand. The spider placed its leg on the kid's chest, holding him down face-up, and lowered its head with a curious frown.

"So there are two of you!" it exclaimed. "How did that happen?"

"You mean you're not involved in Doctor Red's sinister plot?" the obsessed fan--who you should know by now was actually the Superkid duplicate--asked.

Meanwhile, our fearless hero saw the behemoth's face extremely close to the obsessed fan--who he had no idea was actually a clone of him--and he yelled, "Hey, you leave that kid alone!" He quickly blew up his cape and then launched himself at the spider. The eight-legged monster looked up just in time for Superkid to barrel right into its face. With a confused roar, the evil arachnid clutched its face, pinning Superkid. Superkid quickly grabbed the bristly hairs on its head before the spider pulled him away.

"Ow! You little parasite!" the colossal arthropod snarled and hurled our diminutive hero to the web in a fit of rage. Our hero bounced harmlessly on the web and landed on his feet in a fighting pose. He grinned. "Probably should've put more thought into this before you went to all the trouble to build this web."

"Oh, but you haven't seen what I can do with this," countered the spider with a nasty grin. It grabbed two cables in its two forelegs and with a cry of "Trampoline!" flicked the web and sent the super kid into the air. But he didn't come back down, for he quickly blew up his cape and there he hovered just out of reach.

The spider stuck out its lower lip and moaned, "Aw, is someone not having a good time?" Then it grinned nastily. "Well guess what? You and I are going to have fun whether you like it or not!" It shot out a cable of web from its abdomen and caught the end of it with its foreleg. Then it made a strange guttural, gargling noise before spitting onto the end of the rope.

Superkid eyed the rope with a sick expression on his face. "You're kidding, right?"

The enormous arachnid didn't answer but smiled and began twirling its rope. Our hero muttered, "Oh nuts," and quickly blew more hot air into his cape-balloon. He slowly began to rise higher.

"I don't think so," chuckled the menacing monster and flung the spit-covered end of the rope at our unfortunate hero. The gobby spit squelched against Superkid's rear end and stuck there. Then that diabolical spider began reeling him in.

"Urgh! Spider spit!" Superkid groaned. "And it's like glue! That spider's pulling me in! I've got to break free!" So he blew more hot air into his balloon.

"Whew! Margaret! I got me a big 'un!" yelled the spider gleefully as it continued to reel our fearless vigilante in like a trout.

Superkid couldn't get away by rising. The colossal critter was just too strong! So instead he blew cool air into his balloon and then pulled the cord to release the air. He hoped that it would break him free, but the adhesive in the spider spit was too sticky and instead he swung down and plunged headfirst into the webbing, getting stuck in one of the holes.

_Fantastic_ , Superkid thought dryly. _Like a fly in a spider's web._ He felt a tug on his behind--the spider was still trying to reel him in.

"Wow," said the giant eight-legged monster as it crawled up to him. "You've really landed yourself in a sticky situation... not that my web is actually sticky." It chuckled at its own joke. It deftly used its teeth to cut the web trapping our hero in place and then it picked him up, holding him tightly by his legs.

"Now... to make sure you won't cheat this time..." The spider quickly began wrapping the fearless kid up until he resembled a damsel in distress tied to a railroad track. The spider surveyed its work with a smile and it said, "There! Snug as a bug in a rug."

Superkid wriggled but it was just as the diabolical arachnid said. He was tied up neater than a square knot. He mumbled to himself, "Now this is a sticky situation."

The spider tossed him to the center of the web where he bounced helplessly. It grabbed the web with both forelimbs and it gave our unfortunate vigilante a wicked grin.

"We'll bounce on three, okay? One... two..."

The massive menace and the fearless kid had been so busy battling and insulting each other than they had both forgotten about the clone. And no, I didn't forget about the clone, too! He just wasn't doing anything interesting at the moment--well, not as interesting as what was going on between Superkid and the giant spider. Mostly it was rolling around and figuring out how to walk on a web while trying not to get squished by the spider. But now he was going to do something interesting--vital, actually. He was going to turn the tide of the battle.

When the villainous behemoth had tossed Superkid to the center of the web and had turned to face him, it had barely missed kicking the clone's head clean off while he was hopping along--which the clone had discovered was the best way to traverse the uncertain topography. But now its bulbous abdomen faced the clone and the clone had a plan to take down the eight-legged menace.

"We'll bounce on three, okay?" said the spider, grinning wickedly at its helpless prey trundled up in the center of the web. The clone behind the spider quickly bounced a few times for momentum while that evil arachnid counted, "One... two..."

The clone launched himself at the spider's leg and gave it a solid karate chop. The spider's "three" became a "threeyaaaak!" and it collapsed onto the web. The web bounced it back up and sent it rolling toward the center... where our hero was.

_Uh-oh_ , he thought. He tried to roll away but the spider was rolling too quick and weighing down the web so that the only way to roll was toward the center. Fortunately, he managed to roll onto his face before the 800-pound monster rolled on top of him. Fortunate because although it wasn't very comfortable what with the cables cutting marks into his body, at least he was able to breathe.

The spider rocked its body--making it more miserable for the youthful vigilante underneath it--until it managed to grab its web and pull itself to its feet. It spotted the clone and it growled, "All right, time for you to join your twin here!"

The clone attempted to hop away but with a shake of the web from the spider he came tumbling toward the eight-legged creeper. The spider grabbed him and immediately began to wrap him up the way it had wrapped up the clone's original self.

Superkid struggled to sit up. He yelled, "Leave that kid alone! He's not part of this!"

"Not part of this?" the spider asked in disbelief as it finished tying the clone up. It tucked him under its arm and crawled to the hero. "He made himself a part of this when he chopped my leg...! Actually, I think it was when he crawled onto my web and started calling me names. He certainly has your gumption."

"He's just a kid!" Superkid cried. "Some crazy fan of mine who's in way over his head!"

"Crazy fan?" blurted the clone, too astonished for further words.

"Just let him go," Superkid continued. "He's no threat to you."

"No threat?!" the clone blurted again, this time now filled with all sorts of words that he wanted to throw at his counterpart. Picking the best ones, he cursed, "I'll show you--umph--who's a threat! You no good... dirty... rotten..."

Superkid stared at the kid in bemusement, wondering what his problem could be. You're probably wondering how our hero--an amazingly fearless kid with a quite sizable IQ--could be so naive not to recognize that the kid was actually his evil clone. The answer to that is quite simple, actually: the spider was holding the clone backwards, so all Superkid could see was the clone's feet.

The giant spider crawled to Superkid and picked him up in its other foreleg. Now with both kids tucked under its legs, it crawled forward.

"You've got me," said Superkid, still considering the victim's safety even though the victim wasn't showing much appreciation. "Just let the kid go. He's just more hassle for you to deal with. Put him down and then you can play with me all you want. You won't have to keep your eye on two of us--wait, what are you doing?"

"You'll see," said the diabolical arachnid. And because you can't see, I'll tell you what the spider was up to. It had stopped and was now chewing a hole in the web that was big enough for the spider to crawl through. Once it was finished, it crawled under the web toward the center again, and there it paused.

"Stop number two," the evil arachnid announced. Then with an evil grin it added, "Two for the number of seconds it'll take for you to fall."

Superkid glanced at the feet of his obsessed fan and thought, _Uh-oh. I hope I can get us out of this one._

The clone looked at the feet of his imposter and thought, _Uh-oh. Looks like I won't be getting out of this one._

Yes, folks, it's a very tight spot for our hero and the clone here. Both were wrapped tightly in spider silk--the strongest material, relatively speaking, known to man--and facing a drop of thirty feet. It would take a miracle for the two of them to get out of this predicament alive... or something convenient at the last minute.

The diabolical spider dropped the two of them, sending them tumbling to the ground like juggling pins. They struggled to free themselves and find some way to save themselves but it was futile. The bonds were too tight and the ground was coming up too fast! Oh, I can't look!

But then that something convenient at the last minute appeared. Superkid shrugged the cables loose and he was free! But it wasn't so much convenient as it was clever. For you see, before the spider had wrapped him up, Superkid had blown up his cape enough so that when he deflated it, the silk cables would become loose! Now free, he twisted himself toward his obsessed fan and quickly grabbed him by the cables. Then he inflated his cape--after poking himself in the eye a few times with the hose at his shoulder--slowing their descent to a safe speed.

"Whew, that was close!" said Derrick. He and Darrin had positioned themselves to catch their heroic friend and the poor obsessed fan when they had seen what the spider was doing. But then he yelled in alarm as he pointed up, "Look out!"

Superkid looked up and then cried, "Wha..."

WHOMP! The enormous spider dropped on them. The force of the impact forced the spider to splay its legs, which forced its body onto the ground, squashing the two kids beneath it. Fortunately for Derrick, he had managed to run away in time... he could really run when he wanted to!

The spider grunted as it picked itself up, "Landed a bit harder than I expected." Then after giving itself a shake, the massive menace stepped aside to see how its victims fared.

Darrin and Derrick gasped. Then Derrick yelled, "Superkid! Superkid, get up!"

Superkid and the clone were both lying face-down... not moving. Superkid's balloon-cape bobbed as though trying to pick the hero up.

"Oh no," gasped the gargantuan arachnid. "Can it be? Can my arch-nemesis really be..." Then it threw its head to the sky and wailed, "Now how am I going to do the 'Tarzan'?"

Darrin couldn't believe it. Derrick couldn't believe it. The citizens of Poolington who had gathered to watch the face-off between the hero and the monster couldn't believe it. Even I couldn't believe it... because, of course, I know how the story goes. And it certainly doesn't go without Superkid! How else am I going to fill out the rest of the eight chapters of this edition? Relate the details of his funeral and burial?

Unfortunately, since I'm not directly involved in the story, everyone, including Derrick and Darrin, had to sweat it out and hold their breaths waiting for the hero to jump to his feet, yell, "Surprise!" and get back to whupping the silk stockings out of the giant spider.

And eventually he did... though not exactly the way I had described it. Rather he coughed then groaned and rolled onto his back.

"He's alive!" someone yelled and the crowd erupted into cheers.

"That was a close call," the giant spider chuckled to Superkid as the hero got shakily to his feet. "You were almost killed by my 'Spider Drop.'"

"Sure feels like I almost got killed," groaned Superkid, putting a hand on his back.

"But I've got one last move that I've got to show you." The spider lowered its head close to Superkid as though sharing a secret. "It's called the 'Tarzan.'"

"I'm guessing it has some--mph!" he cringed as he suddenly straightened his back with a pop, "--thing to do with swinging through the air."

"Good guess." The diabolical arachnid grinned. "It starts with you in the air and then I come swinging at you, like Tarzan, and send you crashing through a window."

"Through a window?" said Superkid dubiously.

"There's a pretty, little one right over there," the spider pointed out with its leg. And indeed it was a pretty, little, circular one right above the door. The spider would have to be a good shot to send our hero crashing through it.

"But I would have to be in the air..." said Superkid slowly.

The spider wagged a foreleg at Superkid like a reprimanding mother. "Oh, you think you have it figured out, but I assure you there are ways of getting you in the air."

"Oh I don't plan on cowering on the ground..." Superkid assured the diabolical arachnid as he surreptitiously reached for the hose at his shoulder. "In fact..." He suddenly whipped the hose into his mouth and blew hot air into his cape. His cape expanded and lifted him into the air.

The massive spider's eyes flew wide and it yelled, "Hold on a minute! I need to be up there first! You get back here while I--Hey!"

Superkid had puffed some cool air into his cape and pulled the cord to send him jetting away.

"No! You little... come back here!" The spider crawled after the aerodynamic kid, scattering a few of the citizens in its path. It attempted to climb a few buildings along the way but it only gripped them for a few seconds before dropping and crawling after its nemesis. Eventually it gave up trying to climb on top of the buildings and just charged after the youthful vigilante. And everyone else followed behind, not wanting to miss the action.

Chapter 4

The Kid, the Clone, and It--part 3

So now the tables have turned on the evil arachnid. It had had our hero and the clone in its grasp but Superkid managed to thwart its diabolical plan and was now leading the spider to a battleground of his choice. The people of Poolington were following along, of course, to see how this epic battle would play out.

What? You're wondering about the clone? Okay, we'll go see...

The clone was knocked out. Okay, now we know. Let's go...

Wait a minute, the clone _had_ been knocked out, but now with everyone herding past him, he was very alert. Getting stepped on will do that to you.

They stepped on every part of his body from his face ("Rnf!") to his fingers ("Argh!") to his stomach ("Oof!") to that very sensitive area that we males are endowed with (this sound can't be translated directly, but it was something like, "Ow! Ow! Why there?! Why there?!"). This went on for five agonizing minutes until at last the last of them had herded past him so now he could roll over and groan in peace. It didn't take him very long to get back to his feet though he was still sore all over. He was Superkid's duplicate, after all.

He grunted as he limped forward, "I can't... let him... fool them into... thinking... he's... the real... Superkid. Got to... save them... from his evil...plan." So grunting, he hobbled as fast as he could.

Meanwhile, the real Superkid continued to lead the enraged giant spider through town. Soon, our hero's destination became clear. His battleground of choice was an old, abandoned... nope, not a factory... not a mansion either... football stadium? Where in the world did you come up with that?

Anyways, no. The battleground that Superkid had chosen to stage his triumph over evil was an old, abandoned... theater. Once, aspiring actors of Poolington had performed there in an attempt to impress their friends and family. But after one dream too many had died there, the theater kind of fell off the map. How poetic that after so long the theater would be the stage for a clash between a hero and a monster. But I've never been that fond of poetry (though if I really wanted to impress you, I could mumble the words "iambic pentameter") so let's cut right to the action, shall we?

Superkid finally touched down in front of the theater doors. Then, with the spider roaring and scuttling close behind him, he ran inside.

It was huge in there. It was big enough for the spider but not for the spider to fight in... which had been Superkid's plan the whole time. Above the doors was a balcony where Superkid could gain an advantage. Unfortunately, he was disadvantaged when the giant spider squeezed itself through the door, forcing him back.

"There you are!" it growled. "Got you now!" It shouldered itself inside, knocking seats aside with its giant legs.

"Catch me if you can!" Superkid taunted and then blew up his cape and rose into the air.

The spider immediately spun itself a length of rope and coiled it onto its leg. Then it spat a glob of spit onto the end of the rope. And finally it spun the gobby end around for momentum and then tossed it at Superkid, aiming for his leg. But just as it seemed it would stick... Superkid tucked in his legs. The rope flopped back down in sulky defeat.

The enormous spider wasn't going to give up so easily, however--or with its temper in check. It roared angrily, charged for the wall and began to climb.

"Ready or not, here I come!"

Superkid drifted toward the balcony, which in hindsight probably wasn't the best plan. The spider crawled onto the ceiling--which creaked ominously though the spider didn't notice--and veered toward our diminutive hero. Superkid saw what was going to happen, so he changed direction at the last minute. He tugged the hose at his shoulder, releasing air from his balloon so that he began sinking.

"Oh no you don't," growled the evil arachnid. It swung its rope around for momentum and then tossed it like a fishing line. The rope literally wound up around Superkid's neck.

"Ghuul!" His breath was cut short. The rope tightened around his neck like a noose. Without breath to blow into his cape, he had to think of something quickly before he choked to death. He grabbed the rope above him and tugged, lifting himself up and loosening the noose around his neck... pretty quick thinking, considering that his supply of oxygen to the brain had been cut for a moment. There was still a little hot air in his balloon so he bounced up a little before sinking down again, which gave him enough time to grab the hose at his shoulder and blow more hot air into his balloon.

Then the spider began to reel him in again. Keeping a couple of fingers beneath the noose to keep it from tightening against his gullet, Superkid blew air into his cape, twisted himself around and then tugged the hose. He shot toward the eight-legged villain.

That evil arachnid expected this. But expecting something and being prepared for it are two different things. So while it had indeed expected this, it hadn't actually thought of how it would counter it. It did shoot out its legs to catch the fearless kid, but he shot right past them and slammed into the side of its bulbous behind.

First came the four right legs of the spider, bringing good-sized chunks of the chalky ceiling with them. Then the four left legs followed, also clinging to ceiling chunks. Having lost footholds in all eight legs, now the bulbous body and head led the way to the theater floor--the head roaring all the way.

Now our hero had expected this but he hadn't prepared for it either. The giant spider still had a tether on him, so Superkid, who was still rising, was suddenly yanked down, which gave him a pretty bad whiplash.

The 800-pound spider crashed through the theater floor to the basement floor below. It bounced to its feet on the concrete floor and then collapsed with a groan. The rope it gripped came free and Superkid bobbed upward.

He quickly worked the noose loose (Hey! I made a rhyme!) and then dropped it to the floor. He glanced down through the chasm in the floor to the unconscious behemoth below.

Whoops! I mean it appeared unconscious until it stumbled to its feet and looked up angrily at Superkid.

"All right! You've had your fun! But now it's time for my kind of fun. Brace yourself for--'the Tarzan!'" It scuttled to the wall and began climbing again.

_Me have bad feeling about this_ , our fearless hero thought.

***

The Superkid duplicate struggled through the crowd gathered outside the theater--premiering the epic battle between kid and monster. Behind him he towed a bed-sheet that had been gathered together to form a sack and tied with string to close the opening. Because you're wondering what's it's for, I'll tell you... to wait until he uses it to find out. A hint? Well... let's just say it's a clever substitute for the thing he was missing.

He managed to force his way to the doors, which were demolished now thanks to the giant spider. He paused and peered inside to assess the situation.

An enormous, jagged hole led down to the basement. The enormous arachnid was crawling out of the hole like some mad scientist's experiment gone wrong. The clone held perfectly still, hoping the giant spider wouldn't spot him in the crowd.

The spider paid absolutely no attention to him. Its attention was focused solely on the kid hovering above as it crawled up the wall.

_That imposter is distracting it_ , the clone thought, turning his attention to other spots of the old theater, _which gives me the element of surprise_.

Meanwhile, the spider reached the ceiling. With each step it took, it probed the ceiling and tugged on it to make sure it was firm before taking another step. After its last mishap with the flimsy ceiling, it wasn't going to take chances.

This tender-footed approach did have its disadvantages though. As the spider crawled slowly along the ceiling, its archenemy was able to easily keep his distance. But the spider wasn't too concerned about this though. It didn't need to be concerned just yet.

At last it reached the corner. There it spun webbing from its spinnerets and attached it to the corner. Then, just as carefully as it had crawled to this corner, it made its way toward the other corner, with the webbing trailing behind it. Superkid, no longer bothering to keep a safe distance, watched it and wondered, _What in the world is it doing?_

The answer didn't get any clearer even after the eight-legged goliath had attached lines to all four corners of the theater and tied them together in the center of the theater. And still the answer remained obscure as the giant spider lowered itself from the center of the ceiling until it hung halfway between the ceiling and floor. And still that sneaky answer kept its distance as the enormous arachnid began swinging away from Superkid--who was too high for the villainous critter to reach anyways--until it managed to catch the wall. And finally that wicked little answer stuck its tongue out at our hero as the spider twisted itself until it was sideways on the wall, facing Superkid.

Superkid called to the spider, "All right, I give up. What's your evil plan?"

The spider didn't answer. But when it suddenly scuttled across the wall and then launched itself to swing in a wide circle toward Superkid, yelling like a jungle man, that's when that beastly little answer finally slapped our hero full on in the face... which was nothing to how it felt being slapped by an enormous spider pretending to be the lord of the apes. He went spinning like a ballerina through the air though his balloon quickly slowed him down. The giant spider, meanwhile, caught itself on the opposite wall and reversed direction to face our hero again.

It whooped. "Whoo! That was fun, eh Superkid? Wanna go again?" As it spoke, it backed up to draw the line taut.

Superkid was disoriented after being whammed and swung around the room. He shook his head to clear it but he wasn't in time to stop the yelling jungle-man arachnid from slamming into him a second time. When he spun away, he was once again very disoriented.

"This is fun!" crowed the giant spider. "Aren't you having fun?"

Superkid wasn't in much of a condition to answer--not that his opinion would have mattered. He hadn't even begun to shake his head when the yelling spider slammed into him again... and again... and again.

"Whee! Woo! Whee!" that diabolical crawler cheered as it swung back and forth, tossing the unfortunate fearless kid about. "This is fun! We should do this more often!"

Superkid tried his best to regain control of the situation--snatching at the hose flopping around on his shoulder--but that evil monster kept throwing him off--both literally and figuratively speaking. Once again, our hero was in a pickle.

Was there no help for our hero? Was there any hope of escape? Was he doomed to swing back and forth with a deranged mutant arachnid forever (or until the spider got bored and ate him)? Have I forgotten any important questions a good narrator of a superhero story asks in their hero's hour of dire peril?

Well actually, yes, yes, no and maybe. You remember the clone, right? Right, of course you do. Well, just as soon as the massive menace became busy batting the super kid in a bizarre game of tennis, the carbon copy of our hero crept to the corner of the theater and then pulled out the bed-sheet that he was holding as a sack. He puffed into the mouth of the sack. Amazingly, this actually worked! The bed-sheet ballooned and then rose, lifting the Superkid duplicate into the air. He cheered to himself, "It works!"

Then his ascent began to slow down. The sheet was too permeable and the air inside was leaking out. But that wasn't too big a problem. The clone simply puffed more air to give himself more lift. And when his ascent began to slow again, he puffed more air into his bed-sheet balloon. He slowed again and so he puffed in more air. He slowed and then puffed. He slowed and puffed. Slowed and puffed.

Then his head hit the ceiling. It was so unexpected--and painful--that he let go of his makeshift balloon!

It was a long way down--a gut-wrenching drop. He was looking at fifty feet from ceiling to where the spider had punched a hole into the basement floor... of course, looking at and falling at are two separate things. Somehow he had managed to grab the web while his makeshift balloon went back to being a languid bed-sheet that rippled to the floor.

That was close, thought the clone--a matter-of-fact statement since he couldn't feel fear. Now he began to cross the rope hand over hand toward the center.

The clone had a plan. The plan was to cut the spider's line, which would drop it to the fearless clone's level so he could show it who's boss. After that, he would deal with the imposter.

But he had no tools to cut the rope with--no saw, no knife, scissors or anything else sharp. But our hero's duplicate was resourceful and he knew how he was going to cut it. It was rather ingenious... an illuminating example of just how resourceful and smart our hero--and consequently his clone--was. Once he reached the center where the spider was swinging directly below him, he would begin to demonstrate that resourcefulness and smartness.

Now that I'm done being annoyingly vague, the clone leaned toward the line that held the spider up. He puffed out his chest and his cheeks as he sucked in as much air as he could. Then he blasted out all the air in his lungs onto the web, working it as hot as he could possibly make it.

He thought at first that it wasn't working. His arms were shaking from the effort of holding onto the web above and he was making himself dizzy with all the puffing. But after a few more blasts of hotter-than-normal air, he saw the web strands starting to unravel.

Encouraged, he puffed more hot air onto the line. Then, taking a break from puffing, he checked the situation below him.

The giant spider was whooping with glee as it tossed about Superkid--whom the clone thought was his clone even though he was the clone cloned from the supposed clone that was Superkid. It shouted, "I've never had so much fun! And I think I'm winning too! Who's keeping score, do you know?"

_I am_ , thought the clone, _and you're scoring for the wrong team_. He went back to blasting the line with hot air.

Faster and faster the web strands began to unravel. Back and forth the eight-legged monster swung. Louder and louder its whooping got. More and more our hero got whupped.

Faster and faster they unraveled. Back and forth it swung. Louder and louder it got. More and more he was.

Faster and faster. Back and forth. Louder and louder. More and more.

FASTER AND FASTER! BACK AND FORTH! LOUDER AND LOUDER! MORE AND MORE!

And then finally it happened! The Superkid duplicate had melted the web down to the size of yarn. The enormous arachnid had tossed the real Superkid toward the theater entrance and swung toward the stage. At the apex of its swing, the web snapped and it sailed backwards towards the stage, which just so happened to be set up as a dungeon full of maces, spears, swords, arrows and all sorts of sharp objects.

The diabolical critter flailed its eight legs as the stage came closer and closer--writing in slo-mo here. Gleams slid across the weapons as the evil arachnid's massive hindquarters approached. A garbled, "Nooooooooooooo!" fled from the gargantuan monster's mouth as though abandoning a ship sinking in slow motion.

Closer and closer the spider got to the stage. Shinier and shinier the weapons got. Louder and louder the spider's "Noooo" became.

Closer and closer. Shinier and shinier. Louder and loud...

All right! All right! I'll cut it out! I'm just trying to play out the drama here. It's not as easy as it looks, you know.

The spider landed with a dramatic crash. All those shiny weapons? They turned out to be cheap wood glossed over with gray paint. Still, they hurt quite a bit. To add insult to injury, the spider was now stuck in the stage, having crashed partway through it.

It flailed its legs and grunted as it attempted to heave itself out of the hole. It growled grumpily, "Not again!"

It took a while for our battered and bruised hero to realize that he wasn't being "tarzan'ed" anymore. But it wasn't long at all after his head stopped spinning that he discovered the giant spider in its sticky situation, which made him smile. He pulled the cord, which dropped him to the floor. Then he coolly made his way to the evil critter, taking his time.

"Well, well, well," said Superkid as he approached. "Looks like your little game didn't end quite the way you planned."

"Oh, it's not over yet," grumbled the spider as it struggled in the hole. "This is just a time-out while I rethink my strategy."

"Strategy?" Superkid snorted. "You're stuck in the floor. How do you plan to get out of this one?"

The fearless kid was surprised when the eight-legged villain chuckled and then answered. "As they say in theater... exit, stage down." And with that, it threw itself backwards, breaking the rest of the stage and vanishing through the floor.

Superkid stared at the spot where the evil arachnid had vanished... A few second later, the spider reemerged, wincing in pain.

"Who was the idiot that left that can of nails there?" it grunted as it hauled itself out. It crawled to the background and swung its massive behind to smash through. It charged through the backstage, knocking around boxes of costumes and props as it scuttled. When it reached the wall, it used its behind again to smash the wall down, which led to the outside.

Before it scuttled away, it turned back to Superkid and growled, "I'll be back, you little worm. And when I do, I'll be the one who wins!"

Superkid snorted. "Dream on, Ugly."

The giant spider waved a fist-like leg in the air then turned and scuttled back to its lair.

So ends the heroic battle between the eight-legged monster and the somewhat stature-impaired...

Not heroic? Yes, I suppose it's true that Superkid was getting his rear end kicked... and I suppose the evidence does point to the clone's heroic actions that saved...

Wait a minute! What do you mean "heroic"? This guy is a clone for crying out loud! An evil manifestation of our hero created by the wicked Dr. Red! He can't be a hero! That would totally ruin the plot!

For you see, though the monstrous spider had been defeated, the troubles had only just begun...

Chapter 5

The Troubles Begin

The clone was quietly celebrating the giant spider's literal and metaphorical fall. When he was done congratulating himself, he turned to the next issue... how to get down? He was still hanging to the webbing stretched from the corners of the ceiling to the center and his arms were actually getting tired. It didn't take him too long to formulate a plan--if it had, he likely would have sooner or later gotten down... the painful way. He would do what he did to the giant spider and melt the rope; except that he would just simply swing down to the floor and drop from a safer height rather than crash through the floor and splat on the concrete like the spider had.

So that's what he did. With a grunt of effort, he lifted himself until he was able to wrap his legs as well as an elbow around the rope. Then he began to blow hot air.

Slowly the silk cable began to unravel...

Meanwhile, the real superhero wasn't quite as in the mood to celebrate as his clone had been. He was glad that the evil arachnid had been thwarted again. But it made him curious because it wasn't him who had thwarted it. Could it have been just a stroke of dumb luck? While the spider had been swatting him around the theater, could its rope have just suddenly snapped?

To find out, he turned and looked up to the ceiling. Then his mouth dropped.

Huh? Isn't that the kid whose hide I saved earlier today? How'd he get up there?

The ungrateful kid clung to the rope like a frightened chimpanzee though he strangely wasn't making a noise except what sounded like yoga breathing exercises.

"He's going to fall," Superkid murmured, "and kill himself... just after I saved him! Is he trying to get me in trouble or something?"

Whatever the case, the hero's code dictated that he prevent innocents from harm--even if this kid wasn't so innocent. So he took the cord and blew into it, and his cape expanded into a balloon and lifted him into the air.

Just then he heard twanging sounds like strings snapping. He turned to the kid clinging to the web and noticed the web bobbing. When he looked closer, he discovered the web had somehow gotten thin near the kid's head--the threads were snapping and soon the whole cable would give away! The kid was going to fall!

Superkid blew more hot air into the balloon to get it to rise faster. But the threads were twanging faster and faster and the rope next to the kid's head was getting thinner and thinner until it was hanging by a thread literally and metaph... yeah, you get the idea.

Superkid puffed more air into his balloon. He had to reach that kid before he plummeted to his doom! Superkid had to hurry to prevent tragedy from befalling an innocent civilian! He had to preserve the virtue of the harmless town of Poolington!

The final thread snapped. The kid plummeted. Superkid shot out his hand to catch him... but missed...

And he watched in horror as the kid plummeted to a gruesome fate that no person--good or evil--deserved. He watched as innocence shattered into millions of tiny fragments right before his very eyes... watched as everything he worked so hard to defend crashed all around him... watched that pure and guileless youth swing toward the wall...

Swing?

Our hero's horror turned to astonishment as he watched the kid swing down toward the front entrance from the giant spider's rope. He was even more astonished that when the kid reached the wall, he kicked off it and flipped backwards to land on his feet.

"That was amazing!" shrieked a reporter, who was standing in the lobby along with a huge crowd. She turned to her cameraman. "Did you get that?"

Superkid dropped to the ground and hurried to the kid. "Are you all right?"

"Never better," the kid responded as he brushed off his sleeves. "Which is more than what can be said for you in the next few minutes!"

Superkid was bewildered. What the heck was that supposed to mean? Who was this jerk?

The reporter, who stood on the other side of the kid and so could actually see his face, gaped between him and Superkid behind him. She stammered, "There's... there's..."

Superkid had had enough of this kid's attitude. With as much control as he could summon, he said as he chopped the air with his finger, "I don't know what you're problem is, but unless you're going to be my archenemy, you'd better apologize to me and show me a little more respect before I kick your behind into the next county."

The kid threw back his head and laughed. "Your archenemy? You make it sound like you're the real hero and I'm the imposter! Or haven't you figured it out yet?"

Superkid tensed. This sounded like a lead-in to a heated battle. But the kid's words were confusing, so he asked, "Figured what out?"

The kid turned. Superkid's face changed from grim determination to utter shock. His mouth dropped open and his eyes popped out--and this time I only mean it metaphorically.

"Who... how... who... where... how..."

"Surprised to see me?" The clone smiled evilly at Superkid. "Didn't think I'd escape from your diabolical master, did you?"

Our hero had no idea what this duplicate was talking about so he didn't quite know how to respond. Before he could think of it, Derrick and Darrin squeezed through the crowd to the front.

"Did you beat it?" Derrick asked.

Superkid and the clone both turned to Derrick and Darrin.

"Whoa!" Both Derrick and Darrin did double-takes. "There's... there's two of you!"

"You've been fooled by this imposter this whole time!" The clone waved his finger at his original self. He sneered at our hero, "Your guise has been exposed. The game is up. Time to go back to your master."

"What in the world are you talking about?!" Superkid finally managed to blurt out. "I'm the real Superkid! You're the imposter!"

"Oh yeah?" The clone crossed his arms. "Prove it."

Superkid thought a moment. Then he blew hot air into his cape-balloon, which lifted him a few inches into the air. Then he let out the air, which slowly brought him back to the ground.

"Can you do that?" he challenged.

The clone snorted. "Obviously, but it proves nothing..." Then his face brightened. "Ah, but if you're the real Superkid, how did you acquire that power?"

Superkid narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Wait a minute, this is a plot of yours to learn all that you can about me while pretending to already know it."

"Or maybe you're just using that as an excuse for not knowing the answer?" said the clone slyly.

Superkid growled in frustration. "Oh, this is just ridiculous!" He turned to his friends. "Derrick and Darrin, you know I'm the real Superkid, right?"

He waited expectantly for them to tell him they did. But they didn't. No, some way or another, the two of them had become perplexed, judging by the looks they gave each other.

Darrin leaned toward Derrick. "How do we tell?"

Derrick mused--a strange look for him. Then he pointed. "I say he's the real Superkid. He's wearing the costume."

"But how can we tell for sure? I mean, what if he really had been an imposter this whole time?"

"Why would he be an imposter?" Derrick asked him. "Nothing's really happened in over a week. If he was an imposter, he would have done something evil by now."

Which was pretty insightful for Derrick. Darrin, on the other hand, was a step ahead of Derrick as far as complicated plots go. "He could have replaced our friend just recently. He could have taken his place this morning."

Derrick's eyes widened. "Hey, you're right, he could have..." He turned to Darrin, who was perplexed further when he saw the gaping smile on his goofy friend's face. "Then either one of them could be the real Superkid and the other one... _a clone!_ " He squealed with joy.

Darrin groaned, "Ugh. Derrick, this is serious! If we can't find out who the real Superkid is, then... well... it could be bad!"

"Then I have a solution," said the clone, drawing everyone's attention. "You test us."

Superkid eyed him suspiciously. "You must know all the answers somehow."

The clone smirked at him. "And you must not if you're nervous about getting asked questions that only the real Superkid would know."

"No," said Superkid, irritated, "I'm just suspicious about what makes you so confident."

While the two Superkids bickered, Darrin leaned toward Derrick. "So what questions do we ask them?"

Derrick answered gleefully as though he had been asked to read off his Christmas list, "My favorite TV show, your favorite color, your secret crush..."

"I don't have a secret crush," Darrin told him irritably though he was now suspiciously red in the face.

Derrick pretended he hadn't heard him. "...who his mom is, who his dad is, how many brothers and sisters he has..."

"He doesn't have any brothers and sisters," Darrin said bemusedly.

Derrick hissed, "Hush! That's how we'll catch the fake one! We'll ask trick questions like that and like where you and him sit in class or what his favorite spider is or when did I last help him with his homework or..."

"Or what his secret identity is?" Darrin suggested without much thought.

Derrick brightened. "Darrin, you're a genius! All we have to do is say Aaron's name and whoever changes into Aaron is the real one!"

Darrin shook his head. "We can't do that."

Derrick glared at him. "Why not?"

Darrin explained, "Aaron would freak out if he woke up and saw himself standing next to him."

"Which is why we do them separately."

Darrin opened his mouth... then he thought about it. At last, he replied, "That's a good idea, actually."

"When have I not had a good idea?" Derrick said with a wave of his hand. Before Darrin could tell him about all the _bad_ ideas he had had, Derrick turned around and called to the bickering doubles, "We've come up with a plan."

The two Superkids stopped shouting and turned to him.

Derrick continued, "We have come up with a test... a foolproof plan to see which one of you is the real Superkid."

The clone responded, "It was Darrin's idea... right?"

Chapter 6

The Test

Before they could do the test, they first had to escape the theater without anyone seeing them. People were still crowded all around the theater--including by the hole where the giant spider escaped--and if they saw that there were two Superkids then, uh... well... the world's fabric would come apart at the seams! No, I'm not exaggerating! ...Okay, maybe I am, but still the consequences would likely be unpleasant. So each of them tried to come up with a plan.

"Maybe we could climb out the windows," Derrick suggested, looking at the walls.

"Theaters don't have windows," Superkid told him. "It's a way of controlling the lighting effect."

"Maybe we could have someone distract the crowd while we sneak away," Darrin proposed.

"What would be enough, though, to distract an entire crowd?" the clone pointed out.

Superkid had been musing at the giant hole for a while and now he suggested, "What if we disguised ourselves and snuck out?"

"Where are we going to get disguises?" the clone sneered at his original self.

Superkid shot him the evil eye. "This is a theater, so..."

The clone's own eye twitched. "All right, I get it."

Of course, they deliberated a little more, wondering if they had any better ideas. But eventually they decided that costumes was the best idea, so they all made their way to the basement--down the stairs rather than the hole. It was safer that way.

About five minutes later, they were clear of the crowd. Funnily enough, it wasn't costumes that got them through. They found a secret tunnel that led all the way to a delicatessen, which was actually still in business, if you can believe that. But because of the excitement that had been going on over by the old, abandoned theater, the customers and the employees were gone, giving the four boys a chance to sneak their way home.

When they were finally within a block of their homes--with all of Derrick's old ailments acting up again--Darrin suddenly stopped, prompting all of his friends--and the imposter--to stop as well.

"All right," said Darrin, "this is what me and Derrick decided: we're going to test you separately, so one of you will come with me to my house and the other one will go with Derrick to his house."

"I dibs Darrin," the clone immediately responded, shooting his hand into the air.

Superkid wheeled on him. "Whoa, whoa, wait a minute, why do you get Darrin?"

Derrick didn't quite appreciate the way they were talking about him. He demanded, "What's wrong with me?"

"Yeah, what is wrong with him?" the clone challenged, smirking at our hero.

Our ever-sensitive defender of justice heaved out a sigh. "All right, I'll take Derrick; just don't trust him too much, Darrin; and Derrick..." he lowered his voice, "I hope you've got a foolproof plan of telling which of us is real."

Derrick grinned. "That's why we're going to ask you questions separately! Genius, huh? It was my idea."

"Seriously?" Superkid muttered, though very quietly.

Derrick first wanted Superkid to change into some regular clothes. Superkid had some misgivings about this idea.

"Wouldn't it just confuse you more about who the real Superkid is, even if you found out? I mean it wouldn't take very much for you to mix us up again."

"I already told you," Derrick said, jerking the clothes up and down in his hands impatiently, "we have a foolproof plan to tell you apart, so even if you were both wearing masks, we'd be able to tell which of you was the real Superkid."

Our hero frowned and shook his head. "Then why do I need to change?"

Derrick groaned. Then he hurled the clothes into his friend's face and snapped, "Just get those on!"

"Ow," Superkid said morosely behind the clothes before shutting the door.

A minute or two later, he emerged as a civilian, wearing a red shirt with green sleeves and holding his orange and yellow costume, which Derrick immediately snatched away and crammed into his already cluttered backpack, making Superkid cringe. Then he turned to his superhero pal and motioned him onto the bed.

"Sit," he ordered.

Superkid sat. Then he made a face as he realized what he was doing.

What am I doing? I'm letting Derrick boss me around like I'm some kind of dog! I don't have to...

"Pay attention to me!" Derrick barked.

The youthful vigilante sat up and gave his full attention to his friend-turned-boss.

Derrick grinned. It wasn't often that he got to boss people around. This was going to be fun.

"All right," he said as he began to pace with his hands behind his back and a serious expression on his face, "I'm going to ask you questions that only the real Superkid would know."

"Let's see what you've got," said Superkid with a resigned sigh.

"First question," Derrick held up a finger, "which of these is an evil villain? A. Captain Deadmeat... B. Roachman... or C. Doctor Red."

Superkid shook his head and groaned. "You're kidding me, right?"

"Answer the question!"

Superkid sighed. "It's C. Doctor Red. But the imposter would have known that since Doctor Red must have created him."

"Um..." Derrick blinked in surprise before he regained his composure. "You're right, of course, which is why I'm going to ask you this..." He resumed pacing before he suddenly spun to Superkid and gave him the fish-eye. "What is the evil Vampire's special power? A. To eat garbage... B. To talk really fast... or C. To suck energy from people and read their minds."

This time our hero groaned. "It's C. Ugh, Derrick! You're being too predictable! 'To eat garbage'? What kind of a choice is that?"

Derrick chose to ignore Superkid's jibe this time and instead stroked his imaginary goatee. "Hmmm... you're starting to sound convincing to me, but a few more questions to be sure."

And so it went. Derrick asked the super kid questions that could only have been answered by the real Superkid--at least, in theory--and some trick questions that should throw off the fake Superkid... if it turned out he was the fake.

"How old is your mom?"

"You know my mom's age?"

"Just answer the question."

"Forty-seven."

Derrick gave him a look. "Wow, she's old!"

Superkid gave him an exasperated look. "You just asked that to satisfy your curiosity, didn't you? Then again, if I was the fake, I could have just made up some random number."

"All right, fine! Next question... what year were you born?"

"1995, as I'm sure the fake Superkid knows."

"What's your favorite food?"

"You don't know that one, do you?"

"Who's your secret crush?"

"You're kidding me right?

As the questioning continued and Derrick kept coming up with less and less personal, only-the-real-Superkid-knows questions, our hero began to get frustrated. But the thing of it was Derrick's questions weren't meant to test the real Superkid at all. They were just a way for him to build up the suspense for the really BIG question... No, not for his hand in marriage, you smart alecks!

But finally after what seemed like hundreds of pointless questions that wouldn't have distinguished a harp from a hippo, Derrick popped it on him... NOT the marriage one! Seriously!

In a dramatic breath, Derrick asked, "What... is... your secret identity?"

At this question, Superkid balked. He gave Derrick his most perplexed look yet. "What are you doing?"

Derrick crossed his arms and frowned down at the kid hero imposingly. "Answer the question."

"But if I do, I'll change!"

"Exactly!" said Derrick with a finger raised in triumph. Then he gave a start. "Hang on. You know about your secret identity? Then that's undeniable proof that you're the real Superkid!"

"Actually, everyone knows my secret identity," Superkid pointed out. "It wouldn't have been very hard to research..."

"Then there's no choice!" Derrick interrupted grandly. "To discover if you're the real Superkid, I must find out if you can change..."

Superkid blinked in surprise and nodded. "Actually, that does make sense."

"Of course it does!" Derrick interrupted grandly yet again and then he added, "Aaron."

Superkid convulsed, which threw him backwards onto the bed. He gave a short gasp of fright. Then slowly his eyes roved across the ceiling.

"Wait a minute," he said at last. "This isn't my room... this is Derrick's." He sat up and almost screamed out loud when he saw Derrick staring eagerly at him from the foot of the bed.

"Are you Aaron?"

"Oh no, Derrick," he said sarcastically, "I'm actually Santa Clause on break. This is just a disguise I'm using while I wait for Christmas."

"No, seriously," said Derrick, a little annoyed by his friend's insult, "are you Aaron?"

"Yes, I'm Aaron! What, you thought I'd have amnesia?"

"Maybe," snapped Derrick. Out of spite, he asked Aaron, "Do you remember how you got here?"

That shut Aaron up. He gazed around the room, his eyes growing wider with each second until he finally said in horror, "Actually, no. I don't remember! Oh no, it's happening again! I'm spazzing out again! Maybe we should call a doctor! Or my mom! Where's your phone? Where's Darrin?" He started to run toward Derrick's door.

"No!" Derrick dashed to the door and blocked Aaron's path. Aaron skidded to a stop and cried, "What are you doing?"

"Just stay here," Derrick told him. He jabbed his finger at Aaron and added sternly, "Don't move! I'll be back later so do not move!" He jabbed his finger one last time and then turned and hurried away, leaving Aaron trembling.

Derrick hurried but not to find help for Aaron. He was excited because he had the real Superkid and he wanted to tell Darrin. He hurried to the front door, yanked it open and ran smack dab into Darrin. Their heads bounced off of each other, leaving them both dizzy and tasting the unpleasantly metallic taste of blood.

"Ow! Geesh, Derrick! Why don't you watch where you're going?" Darrin snarled while rubbing his forehead.

"Why did you get in my way?" Derrick snapped back, shaking his head, which only made the dizziness and pain worse.

But a few seconds later, after their pounding headaches disappeared, Derrick got down to business. "So I did what we planned. I asked him a whole bunch of questions and he answered them all..." He left out the part that the questions were all pointless. "Then I dropped the big one on him... I said his name."

"And...?"

Derrick beamed. "He's the real Superkid. He changed into Aaron--the grumpy, big-word-using, scared-of-everything Aaron."

Darrin gave him a look. "You're sure?"

"Yeah, I even asked him some questions and there's no doubt it's him." He puffed out his chest. "So now all we have to do is tell the phony Superkid that he's been exposed and that he needs to leave..."

"But Derrick..." Darrin began.

"And if he doesn't, we'll get the real Superkid to kick him out..."

"Derrick..."

"Or wait! Maybe we'll just tell him it's the last test--to fight each other and the winner is the real Superkid!"

"Derrick..."

"But we know who the real Superkid is so we can help him out and show that fake Superkid who's bo..."

"DERRICK!"

Derrick jumped and then began digging his finger into his ear. "Owwwww..." he complained. "Did you have to yell?"

Darrin shook his head in exasperation. "Derrick, your plan didn't work."

Derrick froze with his finger still in his ear. He frowned at Darrin. "My plan didn't work?"

Darrin shook his head.

"What do you mean?"

"You said your Superkid turned into Aaron?"

Derrick nodded.

Darrin sighed. "Well, I did what you told me to. I asked him questions and then called him by his real name."

"And?"

Darrin heaved another sigh. "My Superkid turned to Aaron, too."

Chapter 7

Double Trouble

Yes, I know that's the oldest twins pun ever invented! I just thought it was an appropriate title for this chapter, okay? What should I have titled it? Dual Dilemma?

Derrick refused to believe Darrin. He demanded that Darrin show him this so-called Superkid-turned-Aaron that he was supposed to test. So Darrin took him to his house and to his room where this imposter-Aaron was.

The imposter-Aaron was browsing through Darrin's bookshelf. When they entered, he straightened guiltily and said in an overly loud and demanding voice, "Why are you keeping me cooped up in here? What am I, under arrest?"

Derrick marched up to him and thrust his face into the imposter-Aaron's, popping his right eye at him. Aaron backed away nervously. "What's your problem?"

"What's your mom's name?"

Imposter-Aaron blinked in surprise. "Uhh... Charlene Purn?"

Derrick nodded, dumbfounded though he didn't show it. Could it be that...?

No! It had to be a trick! He had to be pretending to be Aaron! But how to really know?

Suddenly Derrick gasped and pointed behind Aaron. "Smash that spider!"

With a yell, Aaron twisted and leaped away. When he realized there was no spider, he grew red in the face and grumbled, "Funny prank, Derrick. Ha ha ha."

"So he is Aaron," Derrick murmured in despair to Darrin.

"Two Aarons," Darrin agreed. Then he asked, "So now what do we do?"

That was a question that not even Derrick--who had so recently been brimming with good ideas--could answer. His one ace in the hole--Superkid's alternate identity--had fallen through and out the other end. It was such a devastating blow to him that he couldn't even think of some other crazy test to put the Superkids through. Eventually it was Darrin who suggested that they keep the Superkids/Aarons separate--with one staying with Derrick while the other got to go home to his mom--until they could come up with a solution.

Which turned out to be a bigger job than they suspected. When Derrick's Aaron found out that he was staying overnight (on a school night, no less!), he immediately became suspicious.

"Does my mom know about this?"

"Yup!" Derrick replied in as convincing a voice as he could make it. "She said you could stay at my house for a while." When Aaron's eyebrows about flew off his face, he added, "Weird, I know, but weirder things have happened, right?"

"Riiiiiiiiiiiight," said Aaron in a voice that said he didn't believe Derrick for one second. He looked around the room. "So where's Darrin?"

"Couldn't get permission," Derrick answered quickly. "But it'll be fun with just the two of us, right?"

Aaron's face twisted unpleasantly. "Did I ever get a say in this?"

It didn't get much easier the next morning. Derrick awoke to find Aaron gone. In panic, Derrick threw on a shirt and ran outside in his PJs. He ran as fast as he could to Aaron's house. He managed to catch Aaron just as he was opening the door to go in. He grabbed him, swung him away and cried, "Where are you going?"

"Getting... ready for school," Aaron answered in a discombobulated voice. The way Derrick had grabbed and thrown him alarmed him, and he didn't feel much better with how wild Derrick was looking right now.

"No!" Derrick blurted then he checked himself, "Uh--why don't you change at my house?" he checked the window nervously for the other Aaron.

This Aaron stared at him perplexedly. "Because I couldn't find my clothes at your house. I figured you must have forgotten them."

"You can wear some of my clothes!" Derrick checked the window again and felt his stomach drop when he saw a shadow moving around inside.

At this point, Aaron was highly suspicious. In an attempt to pinpoint the cause of Derrick's stranger-than-usual behavior, he asked, "What's wrong with my clothes?"

Poor Aaron only became even more confused when Derrick retorted, "What's wrong with mine?" He didn't resist when Derrick began pushing him back down the street, but he did turn and ask his strange friend, "If I asked what the heck is going on, would you tell me?"

"If I told you what the heck is going on," Derrick grunted, glancing nervously back at Aaron's house while trying to get his befuddled friend to pick up the pace, "you would not believe one word of it."

"Yeah probably," Aaron agreed. "I'm hardly believing it now."

Derrick glanced backwards one last time and saw another Aaron step out of the house and walk toward the bus stop. He hurried his Aaron down the street before he discovered his doppelganger.

***

"What in the heck are you doing in there?" Aaron yelled as he pounded on the bathroom door. "We just missed the bus!"

The toilet flushed. Water ran in the sink. Then Derrick emerged with a satisfied, "Ahhh!"

Aaron's eyes bulged. "You're not even dressed!" Now, before you get carried away with all sorts of nasty images in your heads, let me assure you that Derrick was, in fact, still wearing his PJs--blue with cute little pictures of space rockets, smiling moons and chubby stars.

Derrick found himself oddly intimidated by Aaron. It had never really occurred to him that a scaredy-cat could actually be scary. Even so, he drew himself up and answered as coolly as he could, "So?"

Aaron growled, "What, were you _trying_ to make us late for the bus?"

As a matter of fact, that was _precisely_ what Derrick had been doing. He had been doodling in the mirror with a sliver of soap, waiting for Aaron to say they had missed the bus. Now Derrick shrugged. "Well, looks like we won't be going to school today! You know what that means?"

"I've ruined my perfect attendance?"

"We can now do whatever we want! What do you want to watch?"

Now some of you might be wondering, How are Derrick and Aaron going to avoid getting caught by Derrick's parents? Believe it or not, I have an answer for that. Both of Derrick's parents worked when he was usually at school. And now some of you more persistent critics are probably wondering, But won't the school call his parents to ask about his absence? The thing is I don't have an answer for that one.

Oh, quit gloating! I'm still the narrator of this story!

So skating over that awkward question, Derrick's hands were full keeping Aaron entertained. He thought it would be easy just having him and Aaron watching The Tales of Canter Burry. But he was shocked when Canter got a pie in the face and Aaron didn't even crack a smile! Instead, this staunch embodiment of solemnity asked rather derogatively, "So is there any humor in here that isn't childish?"

"Do you even have a sense of humor?" Derrick retorted, now thoroughly annoyed.

It was a relief to Derrick when school finally ended and he and Darrin could figure out what to do with the clones. They all met in Darrin's bedroom. The two Superkids sat on the bed. Though Derrick was standing next to Darrin, he cleverly positioned himself so that he faced Darrin, thus deflecting all attention to him.

Darrin shrugged and held out his hands helplessly, "I don't have any ideas. Both of you answered all the questions we gave you, neither of you made any mistakes, and both of you responded the same way to your other name!" He threw up his hands. "As far as I know, you're both the real Superkid!"

"There has to be some way of proving the real Superkid," said one of the Superkids insistently. "There can't be two Superkids running around town."

"So you were planning to take my place then?" the other Superkid sneered, leaning toward his counterpart.

"Take your place?! I was here first!"

"Yeah, like when someone leaves his seat and you take it and when he comes back and wants it back, you tell him, 'I was here first!'"

Superkid shoved his face into Superkid's face and snarled, "It's nothing like that, you slithering snake!"

Darrin groaned as he rubbed his forehead. "I don't know what to do. Derrick, any ideas?"

He shrugged indifferently. "Just wait until one of them slips up?"

Since Darrin didn't have a better suggestion, that's what they did. They watched the Superkids as their argument got louder and louder, with neither side relenting or showing any sign of making a mistake.

The two Superkids were arguing so loudly and Darrin and Derrick were watching them so closely that none of them heard when Mrs. Snoll yelled to stop yelling in the house. Nor did they hear her when she started marching through the house toward Darrin's bedroom to put a stop to their nonsense. And they definitely didn't hear her when she wrenched the doorknob bad-temperedly. But when she thrust her head into the room and opened her mouth, they definitely heard her then.

"QUIEEEEEET!

They all jumped and turned to her with their mouths open in horror.

Mrs. Snoll took a second to regain her composure and then began, "You kids should know better than to yell in the house. If you're going to raise your voice, then you go outside. The house should be a place for peace and quiet, not noise and chaos... do I make myself clear?" She gave each kid a stern glance, from Darrin to Derrick to Aaron to Aaron...

She did a double-take... and then another. Then she took a step backwards with a cry of shock.

"T-there's two Aarons!" she cried.

"Superkid!" Darrin said hastily as the two Superkids recoiled in response to their alternate name.

"T-two of them!" She seemed to be struggling for breath for she fanned her face. Then she finally asked, "How?"

"That's what we're trying to find out," Derrick answered her.

"Does his mother know about this?" she asked, looking horrified.

Darrin's face became strained. "We were hoping she wouldn't have to."

Mrs. Snoll gulped and then took in a huge breath as though steeling herself for an unpleasant task. "I think I'd better give her a call..."

"Wait, no!" Both Superkids jumped to their feet and took a step toward her. Mrs. Snoll gave a gasp of surprise and took another step backwards away from the doubles.

"She might not take it very well," one of the Superkids explained.

"Still, she needs to know," said Mrs. Snoll as she took another gulp.

As bad as the situation would be if Mrs. Purn discovered she had two sons, it was about to get much worse. For everyone heard the front door open and a young voice call, "Mom! Guess what? I got an A on my spelling test today! Mom?" Then they heard excited feet pattering across the house until they reached the room.

"Hey, guess what, Mom?" said a young curly-haired boy, bouncing excitedly on his feet, "I got an A in spelling today." Then before she could tell him "Good job," he looked into Darrin's room and said, "Hey, how come Darrin's friends are here? Can my friends come over too?" Then he spotted the two Superkids.

His eyes bugged out and his mouth dropped open. Then he began bouncing up and down as he cried in an outdoor voice, "Holy cow! Twins! Hey Darrin, isn't one of them your friend who turns into Superkid?"

"One of them," Darrin said heavily.

Darrin's little brother bounced on his feet. "Wait 'til my friends see this! I'm gonna call them, okay Mom? Thanks!"

Darrin bounded toward the door, "N-n-n-n-no, wait, Wally! Don't!"

But it was too late. Wally was gone and soon the whole town was going to know about the two Superkids.

Kids are probably the fastest way of attracting crowds--especially in small towns. While grown-ups like to ask lots and lots of questions before they make a move, kids only need the words, "Come look!" to bring them running. Ah, but reporters are the perfect blend of kid and grown-up for they immediately run where there's a story and then ask lots and lots of questions. And then came the grown-ups.

It was quite a gathering at Mrs. Snoll's house. The poor woman was caught off guard and wasn't sure if she had enough cheese and crackers to accommodate everyone. It didn't matter much since everyone was too enraptured by the fact that there were now two Superkids. Everyone jostled each other to get a glimpse of the duplicates while the two Superkids were busy trying not to get trampled.

One of the reporters shoved his notepad into the face of one of the Superkids. "When did you discover you had a twin?"

Another reporter elbowed him and leaned forward. "Is it true that one of you is an evil clone created by Dr. Red?"

And yet another reporter used her pencil to poke him in the arm. When he turned away with a yell of pain, she shoved through and asked, "Which one of you is the evil clone?"

The Superkids were never given their chance to give an answer. After one reporter finished asking a question, another reporter would start another. And when that reporter had finished, another would ask a different question. And even before that reporter had finished, another would ask a question.

One Superkid leaned toward his duplicate with a smirk. "What? Is being interviewed by a dozen reporters a new experience for you?"

The other replied, "I don't see you jumping in with answers."

Which was a fair point. There were just too many talking too fast. But finally after the reporters had yelled over each other and about clawed each other's eyes out without any success, they decided to try a different tactic. One group grabbed one of the Superkids and dragged him to one corner of the room, and another group grabbed the other Superkid to another corner of the room. Darrin was grabbed by another group of reporters, Mrs. Snoll was kindly offered a seat by another group, and Derrick--like the poor kid picked last in basketball--was taken by the last group who had been too slow to grab anyone else. And in this way, piece by piece, the reporters were able to get an idea of what was going on.

"...I thought the giant spider had some innocent citizen up there, so naturally I had to go up there and rescue him..."

"...somehow, the evil doctor managed to knock me out and take me back to his sinister lair. But I did escape eventually..."

"...thought it was just a kid, but he could have been Superkid being held hostage while his clone tried to replace him..."

"...I heard all this yelling, which of course is something my husband and I forbid in this house, so I marched up there..."

"...I was the first to discover there were two of them, back at the old, creepy theater. It was also my idea to test them..."

Soon it was all pieced together--all the stories had been told; all the viewpoints had been taken into account; all the questions had been answered...

Except one. And it was asked by the solidly built reporter with a handsome mustache, "So which of you is the evil clone?"

Both Superkids glanced at each other but didn't reply. Both knew by now that it was pointless to point at each other and play the blame game.

The reporter waved his hand around. "Doesn't anybody know? Does no one know the real Superkid well enough to know if he's real or not? Not his friends?"

Darrin and Derrick exchanged glances but didn't say anything either. No they didn't know who the real Superkid was, but it wasn't from a lack of trying!

Then a female reporter raised her hand and suggested, "What about his mother? You know, the mother knows her child best?"

Suddenly all the reporters were yelling and running for the door. Both Superkids reacted in alarm and yelled, "No!" at the same time. They raced each other out the door, trying to be the first to find their mom so that they could shield her from the ugly truth and its hideous messengers.

But they were too late. How ironic that while Superkid could prevent certain doom in time, he could not stop a bunch of reporters from reaching his mom and telling her the dreaded secret. And as you can imagine, she didn't take it well.

"Aaron! What are these people doing in my living room? And what are they talking about saying which Superkid is real?"

The two Superkids, who had been forcing their way through the mob of reporters, reacted violently at their alternate name, which caused them to clonk heads together. They clonked heads again when they heard "Superkid" and collapsed on top of some reporters, but the reporters pushed them back upright and forward toward their mom.

Right then, she resembled an angry bullfrog--bulging eyes, swelling cheeks, ballooning chest... and everyone else suddenly felt like a cluster of flies about to be snatched up by her long tongue, including her two "sons" --that is, her real son and the clone of her son.

"What... how... who..." she croaked.

"Hi, Mom," the two Superkids said, both at the same time and both with "here it comes" expressions.

And boy did it come. It came so forcefully that it sent most of the reporters staggering backwards. They got a full-on lecture about "no-good hypnotists" and "immature villain wannabes who disrupt society just to get their fifteen minutes of fame." A few of the braver reporters tried to interrupt her to ask her a few questions but it was like trying to stop a barreling train with bare hands. One relatively smart reporter just kept his mouth shut and wrote down everything she yelled.

Superkid-mania was in full swing over the next few days. Debates got pretty heated over which of the two were the real Superkids. People jabbed their fingers at the grainy black-and-white photo of the two Superkids glaring at each other and yelled, "That's the real Superkid! You can tell; just look at the other one's evil smile!"

"You're crazy!" yelled other people. "That's the real Superkid! The other one looks scared like we'll find out he's the fake one!"

This couldn't be settled by comparing the Superkids in a photo though. So the people set to work. The Superkids soon found themselves surrounded by people determined to question them both to death to find out who the real Superkid was. The questions, however, weren't much better than Darrin and Derrick's questions. In fact, they were quite a bit more ridiculous.

"Who's the mayor of this town?"

"What's the name of this town?"

"What's the name of your biggest fan?"

With such unsatisfactory results, questions became physical examinations: the Superkids stood back to back to compare heights, the Superkids arm-wrestled to compare strengths, the Superkids ran races to compare speeds, the Superkids held their breaths to compare, uh, breath-holding...ness. And there were even more tests after that!

"This is ridiculous," one of the Superkids grunted as he tried to do the splits.

"This is getting us nowhere," the other agreed. Then he fell onto his back with a loud cry of pain.

They got something of a break at bedtime--if you could call their mom nagging them about getting their identities straightened a break. They went to their bedroom wearily but paused at the single bed that they just remembered fit only one. They looked at each other.

"Mine!" Both leaped for the bed. The Superkid on the left bumped into the Superkid on the right and ended up crashing into the wall. The Superkid on the right bounced to the floor. They were both immediately on the bed again.

After a few minutes of wrestling with each other, one Superkid ended up the victor... which--with both being Superkid--probably should have been obvious. He ended up taking the bed while the other Superkid wound up on the floor. The one on the bed fell asleep almost immediately, but the one on the floor had to mutter first, "Darn clone. What did Doctor Red have to make an evil copy of me for? Once I fix this mess, I'm looking for that evil doctor and straightening him out!" before he was able to slip off to dreamland.

Chapter 8

The True Clone

It wasn't very comfortable on the floor for one of the Superkids, as you can imagine. Strangely though, it was the Superkid on the bed who was tossing and turning as though the soft, cushy mattresses were pressing his elbows into his ribs. But it wasn't from physical discomfort. It was from a mental one.

You see, he was dreaming about his encounter with the vindictive Vampire... dreaming about the icy cold grip she had on his hand and the sense of falling into a pool of darkness... about the red eyes burning into his vision like points of fire and the glint of sharp teeth... dark, bony hands reaching in to rip his limbs apart...

And then there was a rushing sensation like he was flying backwards and upside-down. And then quite suddenly he was rushing forward again and then twisting and tumbling through the air. This all probably sounds like a very good way to make you airsick but actually he was too focused on the tall, dark figure behind the lamppost that he was drifting towards to notice. There was something familiar about the guy.

He slammed into the figure. Curiously, it didn't hurt, though he was pretty sure his stomach just sailed on without him. But he was now directly beneath the mysterious figure's face, which he recognized immediately with a clenching feeling where his gut used to be.

Doctor Red.

He instinctively tensed himself into a defensive stance... or rather, tried to. But he didn't seem to have any arms to bring into his body... or legs to spread into a more solid stance.

_That's strange_ , he thought. But though he was unable to get into a defensive stance, the mad doctor didn't seem to realize that he was there, right underneath his nose. Instead, Red turned and began walking--with Superkid still clinging to his chest.

"This is a strange dream," he said aloud and he woke up.

"That was a strange dream," he repeated. He rolled over and spotted his duplicate curled up on the floor with a look of discomfort on his face. He rolled the other way, trying to dispel his feelings of guilt. He wanted to go back to sleep, but he couldn't banish the thought that had popped in suddenly.

That wasn't just a dream, it was a memory! I remember that happening! But that's impossible! I couldn't have just sailed into my worst enemy without him noticing! I couldn't have sailed, period! Not like I was just a strand of hair...

His body just suddenly went numb. He couldn't move. It was like the dream all over again.

That's where he got DNA to create the clone. A strand of hair that somehow found its way onto his coat. And I was that hair... That means that I'm the...

***

Since I've strategically cut off the story there to create tension--because I'm a real jerk that way--why don't we grind some gears as we transition into a different scene?

Doctor Red made the final adjustments on his invention--one last twist of the screwdriver--before he hefted it into the air in triumph.

"Finally! My diabolical weapon is finished! With this, I shall roast him to a tender crisp!"

He burst into a bout of maniacal laughter. Then cradling it in his hands like a brand new toy, he studied it thoughtfully.

"But why limit myself to just burning him? Why not give him a taste of the other end of the heat spectrum? Why not turn him into a frosty popsicle?"

Smiling wickedly at the thought, he set the flamethrower on the worktable and rummaged underneath it for parts to create his next weapon.

"I have to wonder though," he said thoughtfully as he spread the parts on the worktable, "what's taking him so long? It shouldn't take two weeks to cause chaos and ruin Superkid! He should have been here already."

He reached for a small tank with his left hand and snatched up his miniature welding gun with his right. As he lowered the gun to begin welding the tank, he smiled and said to himself, "But why am I complaining? I have more time to work on my weapons and prepare for his arrival." And with one last evil laugh, he began torching.

Seems like the malevolent doctor is having a pretty good time. The same could not be said for the two Superkids. Superkid-mania was still in full swing. School was cancelled, much to the kids' delight, so that the town could focus on testing the duplicates to see which of them was the real Superkid. This meant running, jumping, memorizing, creative writing (oh, the pain!), sculpting, painting and on and on. The two of them were being run ragged.

"I'm about ready to say I'm the clone just to get this over with," one of the Superkids said half-jokingly. He turned to his twin and saw that his brows were furrowed and his mouth was turned down into a frown.

"Are you okay?" he asked, momentarily forgetting they were enemies.

The other shook his head but not to Superkid's question. Then he smacked his knee in frustration. "It doesn't make sense! Every time I try to reason it out, I always come up with the same result! No matter how I try to explain it, I always come back to the one answer that makes the most sense! But it doesn't make sense!"

"What are you talking about?"

Before the other could explain, the mayor suddenly appeared and announced in a grand voice that the two of them were going to have a dance-off, which invoked a ground-shaking cheer from the audience. The Superkids gave each other looks and rolled their eyes, then followed the mayor out onto the dance floor.

After the dance-off--which ended in a tie, as it would--there were more and more tests. Superkid was getting more and more exhausted, but he noticed that his duplicate was looking more than just tired. He seemed preoccupied with thoughts--evident when he suddenly looked up in shock to find that Superkid had just beaten him.

"And this Superkid wins the pop-guzzling contest!" roared the mayor, raising this Superkid's hand into the air amidst cheers. Superkid glanced distractedly at the other distracted Superkid, and when the mayor dropped his arm, he walked over and put a hand on his shoulder.

"You better start paying attention if you're going to prove to them that you're the real Superkid."

The other blinked in surprise. Then he snapped, "Am I though?"

The first Superkid jumped at his duplicate's outburst. Then he asked, "What do you mean?"

"It was the Vampire who was about to knock me unconscious, but I somehow ended up with Doctor Red! And he didn't even realize I was there! It doesn't make sense!"

Superkid rolled his eyes thoughtfully. But before he could come up with anything, the mayor walked onto the stage and took the microphone.

"Attention, people! Attention! I have an announcement to make."

He waited until everyone had quieted down. He nodded and then continued, "We have tested these two Superkids relentlessly in our determination to determine the real Superkid... we haven't had satisfactory results so far..."

Both Superkids groaned and collapsed backwards into their chairs. The mayor gave them a second's glance and then turned back to the audience.

"But we have exciting news! Mrs. Terrel has just finished a second Superkid costume! Which means now they can come face to face with each other in hand-to-hand combat!"

The audience cheered. The Superkids gave each other "uh-oh" looks.

"Starting tomorrow at 1:00, in the town square, everyone is invited to watch these two duke it out! They will be fighting each other for the ultimate prize: proof that they are the real Superkid!"

The audience roared their approval. The Superkids gave each other "we're doomed" looks.

***

The costume was nearly identical to the original Superkid's costume except it was orange and blue rather than orange and yellow. The other Superkid held it in his hands and stared at it as though it was a crystal ball that he was trying to get to work.

His duplicate noticed his stare--especially at the blue K against the orange background. Unable to help himself, he asked the brooding kid, "Are you okay?"

The brooding kid nodded. "I was just wondering if it's necessary for us to battle each other."

Superkid heaved a sigh. "You know what? I kind of don't care who wins this battle. I just hope that after this it will be all over.

The other Superkid shot him a look. Superkid didn't quite know what to make of it. Was he... mad?

Finally the other Superkid turned away and changed into his costume. Then as Superkid stood next to him in front of the mirror he compared himself to his double.

"We're all ready to go," Superkid commented. Then he turned and stuck out his hand for the other to shake. "May the better Superkid win."

The other Superkid didn't say anything but took his hand and shook it.

The battle was to take place in Central Park--Poolington's, not New York's. The whole town had gathered around to watch. The two Superkids--one in orange and yellow, the other in orange and blue--stood on opposite sides of the square, facing each other with their arms out to their sides and their legs spread apart--this is where a Western showdown theme song and a passing tumbleweed would come in handy. The mayor stood between them in the center of the square.

"Are you ready?!" he yelled, glancing at both Superkids.

"Ready!" they yelled back.

"Then let the battle begin!" He threw down his hand then ran off the square to join the crowd watching the spectacle.

With determined gleams in their eyes, the two Superkids squatted and began circling each other, drawing close together until they were within grabbing distance. They watched each other warily, waiting for the other to make the first move, all the while circling each other.

The crowd held their breath. Their hearts pounded as the tension grew taut while the two Superkids circled around each other.

The Superkid in the yellow and orange costume--who shall henceforth be referred to as "Yellow Superkid"--stared into the eye of the Superkid in the blue and orange costume--who shall henceforth be referred to as "Blue Superkid"--and noticed that the gleam in it was slipping in and out of focus. He moved his hands around to warn him that he was alert and ready to counterattack if the other tried anything, all the while they circled each other.

Round and round they went, both waiting for the other to move, both tense and expecting the attack any second now. Round and round they went, Yellow Superkid beginning to wonder if his duplicate was going to fight him. Was there doubt in his eyes? Round and round they went; maybe this guy really didn't want to fight him? Maybe the clone wasn't evil after all? Round and round they went. Round and round...

"Get on with it!" someone yelled--and about time too! I was about to go nuts with those two doing nothing but going round and round, all the while circling each other! Yellow Superkid turned to the speaker, about to tell him that the fight was pointless and neither of them was evil.

But then Blue Superkid struck. While Yellow Superkid was turned, Blue Superkid wrapped an arm around his neck from behind. Though shocked and feeling betrayed, Yellow Superkid managed to quickly respond by grabbing his opponent's arm to keep it from crushing his windpipe.

But Blue Superkid wasn't trying to crush it. With his free arm, he took the hose dangling over his shoulder and blew hot air into it. His cape expanded and began lifting both Superkids into the air.

Yellow Superkid immediately switched tack. Now instead of prying his foe's arm off, he used it to hold himself up to keep from choking as his weight tried to drag him down. He tried to kick Blue Superkid in the shin but quickly discovered this was likely to make him lose his grip and choke to death. So instead he flailed an arm behind him and scrabbled at Blue Superkid's chest. His fingers tangled into the hose at Blue Superkid's shoulder. He immediately tightened his grip and yanked.

They shot forward like rockets as the air rushed through vents in Blue Superkid's back. They tumbled on the ground; Blue Superkid rolled over his opponent, leaving Yellow Superkid lying flat on his face. Not very graceful, but at least Yellow Superkid wasn't choking to death.

He immediately bounded to his feet and posed in a karate stance. Blue Superkid kicked himself to his feet as well and spun to face his foe, who was already charging toward him.

"Traitor!" Yellow Superkid yelled. As he ran, he pulled back his fist and then thrust it forward in a punch.

Blue Superkid leaned back, evading his double's fist. He grabbed Yellow Superkid's wrist and twisted himself, throwing his counterpart to the ground, who gave a cry of pain.

Then Yellow Superkid brought his legs in and then delivered a mighty kick to his duplicate's stomach, causing him to double over with a loud gasp. Yellow Superkid then clamped his feet together against Blue Superkid's head and with a mighty roll threw his adversary to the ground. Then he jumped to his feet, turned to Blue Superkid, and hunched into a defensive pose.

Blue Superkid rolled over and stood up. He hunched into a defensive pose as well and the two super kids began to circle each other again. Both were puffing from the exercise.

Then Blue Superkid puffed into his balloon-cape and leaped into the air. Yellow Superkid saw this and brought his hose to his mouth to do the same. But as he was doing this, Blue Superkid puffed cool air into his balloon then angled his body and pulled the hose. He shot toward his duplicate with his feet aimed right at him. Yellow Superkid was just rising into the air when his neck suddenly became slotted between his foe's legs and he was rushed headfirst toward the ground where he slammed his head. Fortunately the grass was soft and his partially filled balloon cushioned the impact, but then his adversary turned his fortune by bringing a foot down on his nose in a karate chop.

Pain exploded from his nose into his head, making him cry out in pain and clamp his hands over his nose. A metallic taste filled his mouth.

His double leaped off of him in a backflip. Pinching his nose, Yellow Superkid rolled backwards onto his feet. He considered calling a time-out to clean up his bleeding nose but then realized that his duplicate wasn't going to show him any mercy. Or if he did, then he would use it to his own advantage--to make him look weak! To make him look like a fake! Well, he'd show him! He'd show that clone who was weak! And besides, what kind of hero calls a time-out--especially over a bloody nose?

Still pinching his nose--and quite heroically too--he charged forward with a distorted roar, "Rrrrrrrrmph!" He leaped into the air and did a twirling kick. Blue Superkid caught his foot and shoved him back. Yellow Superkid used his elbow to cushion his fall and send him rolling just before Blue Superkid dropped with his elbow jutting out like a chicken wing... and it looked like it really hurt. In the meantime, Yellow Superkid rolled to his feet and rushed at his foe. He swung his foot up, hooking it under the other Superkid's stomach, and flipped him onto his back. He raised his foot to stomp on his stomach, but Blue Superkid quickly filled his balloon with hot air, which yanked him upright, catching Yellow Superkid's foot and sending him staggering backwards. Yellow Superkid quickly recovered and ran again at his literally rising opponent. He wrapped one arm--he was still pinching his nose with the other--around Blue Superkid's legs to try to stop him but instead began pulling off his pants. Blue Superkid quickly caught his waistband and tugged it back up so Yellow Superkid ended up taking his shoe instead, which dropped to the ground. Yellow Superkid glared at his duplicate for a second and then blew hot air into his own balloon and was immediately rising after his opponent.

Blue Superkid let out a little air until he stopped rising, allowing Yellow Superkid to rise up in front of him. Yellow Superkid let out his air until he was hovering face to face with his traitorous duplicate.

Then Yellow Superkid puffed cool air into his balloon and pulled the hose to send him rushing at Blue Superkid. The blue kid stuck his fist out so that his duplicate was punched in the chest, causing him to gasp. But the yellow version of our hero still got his arms around the blue version and started to squeeze the breath out of him.

He was succeeding... somewhat. Blue Superkid was finding it difficult to expand his lungs and his own fist was driving into his own ribs painfully. He tried to wriggle his arm out to try something, but his double was too strong... Yes, I know technically they should be the same strength, but it was easier to squeeze than to get out of a squeeze.

And speaking of tight squeezes, it didn't look like Blue Superkid was getting out of this one. Yellow Superkid kept one arm around his foe while with the other one, he unpinched his nose--which wasn't bleeding quite as badly as before--took his duplicate's hose, and puffed cool air into it. Blue Superkid saw what his evil plan was and struggled harder to get free.

When Yellow Superkid had finished mixing the cool air with the hot air in Blue Superkid's balloon-cape, he defiantly wiped his bloody nose on his duplicate's shirt and then tugged the hose to release the air.

Not according to plan, they shot in the direction Yellow Superkid's back was facing. He had been trying to drop his double; he didn't want to jet backwards into something that might cripple him! So he let go of his opponent.

Blue Superkid dropped like a plane dive-bombing. He grappled his shoulder for the hose that would save his hide, but he was too late for he hit the ground with an "Ooh!" from the crowd. Yellow Superkid dropped to the ground a second later.

Blue Superkid groaned but managed to stagger painfully to his feet. He brought the hose to his mouth. Yellow Superkid thought he was going to take to the air again, but the blue-costumed kid only blew up his cape-balloon enough to keep him from toppling to the ground, thus making up for his weak leg.

Yellow Superkid advanced on him, hunkered down in a defensive pose. Blue Superkid hobbled forward, held up by his balloon, with his hands held out wrestling style. Both were trying to catch their breaths.

Then Yellow Superkid ran at his blue counterpart and rammed him. They went down but slowly, which gave Blue Superkid time to knee his opponent in the gut. His opponent rolled off and hit the ground with a smack, clutching his stomach and groaning pitifully. The blue-costumed kid pushed himself up, allowing his balloon to lift him to his feet, then he hobbled to his fallen adversary struggling for breath on the ground.

Yellow Superkid looked into his double's eyes and waved his hand weakly. "You win. I'm too tired."

The blue Superkid stared down at him without saying anything. The crowd around him held their breath, waiting for his next move.

Then Blue Superkid whirled around and thrust his hands into the air. Taking this as a sign of victory, the crowd cheered. Yellow Superkid lifted his head wearily and then let it drop with a groan.

It was a while before the crowd stopped cheering but maybe that was because Blue Superkid had his arms in the air for that while until he dropped them and groaned into his hand. When the crowd had finally settled down, he looked up.

"All right, people. I know that this battle was supposed to determine the real Superkid. And I know that I won this battle, which by your logic means that I'm the real Superkid."

The crowd cheered again. Blue Superkid groaned into his hand again. When the crowd stopped cheering, he looked up again.

He took a shuddering breath and then heaved out a sigh. "But... I have a confession to make."

The crowd drew in its breath and waited for it with excitedly pounding hearts. What confession would this inimitable model of true heroism reveal? That it hadn't been his amazing skills that had won this battle but pure courage and undiluted good? That it wasn't this epic battle that had discovered the true hero but the good citizens of Poolington? That it wasn't one lone defender of justice who had prevailed this day but the spirit of magnanimity that resided in each and every person who did, does, and ever will reside on this one, wonderful Earth that we all share?

Blue Superkid's answer wasn't quite that poetic. "For the past couple of days, I've been thinking about it. I've been recalling some memories and I've been trying to reason them out..." He swallowed with difficulty. "But in the end... I came to the only conclusion that made sense..."

The tension grew. Several spectators' faces turned blue from holding their breath. Yellow Superkid sat up and stared curiously at his double.

Blue Superkid dropped his head but his voice rang out clearly. "I'm the clone."

The people gasped--after blowing out the breath they had been holding, of course. Blue Superkid--now revealed to be the true clone--turned to Yellow Superkid--now revealed to be the true Superkid--and stuck out his hand. After hesitating for a second, Yel--uh--Superkid accepted the hand and was pulled to his feet.

"He's the real Superkid," said the clone, lifting his original self's arm into the air. There were scattered cheers, though many of the people began whispering furiously to each other. While this was happening, the clone turned to Superkid and said, "I'm sorry for trying to take your place. I really thought that you were the clone."

"What convinced you otherwise?"

The clone confessed about the memory that didn't make sense and the conclusion that did. Then he explained how he tried to debunk it without success. Superkid listened silently but with a look of bemusement.

"So wait," he said when his clone was finished, "if you realized you were the clone days ago, why did you decide to fight me today?"

The clone flinched guiltily. He swallowed hard lumps in his throat. At last, he answered, "I still didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to think of what would happen to me if I confessed that I was the clone."

Superkid raised an eyebrow. "What would happen...?"

"We both knew what would happen if we found out who the real Superkid was. There'd be celebrating, your friends clap you on the back and tell you they knew it was you all along, and you get treated as a hero. But meanwhile, what happens to the clone? The clone would be considered an imposter and everyone would hate him and he would be driven away... not able to see his friends and family--or what he remembers as his friends and family. He'd live alone in some cardboard box and dig in garbage to find food. The clone would become a nobody..." The clone's voice by now had dropped to a whisper. "I'd become a nobody..."

Superkid saw his duplicate in a new light. He no longer saw an imposter with evil intentions to replace him. He now saw someone desperately trying to cling to an identity.

Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes--excuse me a moment, I need to get some tissues... no, I'm not crying! My... nose is just stuffed!

"I'm sorry," Superkid said softly, placing his hand on his duplicate's shoulder. Then he asked, "So why did you confess?"

The clone turned watery eyes on Superkid. "Because I didn't want that to happen to you..."

Okay, wow. That's a little more emotion than I'm used to for Superkid. I mean, this is supposed to be an action-adventure story, not a story to make you cry your eyes out! Oh why couldn't that clone have simply been evil and defeated and it all ends with us tingling inside and eagerly anticipating the next edition of the Superkid series? Oh why, oh why?

All right, let's just pull ourselves together and finish this story. There's one last battle and then a final teary farewell--the last one, I promise!--and then a tingly ending that gets you checking your social media outlets for the next edition. Onward with the story!

Chapter 9

The Kid, the Clone, and Him

Hey, I'm running out of chapter title ideas, all right? Who are you to say how I should write my narrative anyhow? I'm the narrator and what I say goes! If you think you can do better, go ahead and write your own darn narrative!

"So what are you going to do now?" Superkid asked the clone. It was the next day at Derrick's house. Superkid had gotten permission from his mom to sleep over--yes, for real this time. And Darrin got to sleep over too.

The clone sighed, "Well, I promised Dr. Red I'd return to kick his butt, but after that, I don't know where I'll go."

Derrick grinned eagerly for he had thought up another brilliant idea--this one was sure to get him the title of Derrick, super genius. "Why don't you both just live together and pretend to be twins? Your mom knows there's two of you. She wouldn't mind."

The clone agreed though he wasn't smiling, "Yes, his mom does know there's two of us now. The whole town knows." Here he sighed. "But... our... alter ego doesn't, and what would happen if he saw another him? No, it's best if I leave."

Derrick's face fell. Superkid smiled at his friend's dejected expression and then turned to his duplicate. "How do you think Dr. Red will react when he sees the two of us?"

The clone turned to him in surprise. "What?"

Superkid clapped him on the shoulder. "You don't mind if I come with you and help teach the evil doc a lesson, do you?"

The clone blinked in surprise for a while. Then he laughed and nodded. "That'd be a shock for him: his enemy and his creation working together against him."

Darrin chuckled. "So what's he going to call you with Superkid by your side?"

The clone blinked in confusion. "What'll he call me?"

Darrin explained, pointing to the original fearless kid, "Well, he's Superkid, so your name is... what, Superclone?"

Derrick snorted. "Superclone? What kind of name is that? It should be Superkid the Second."

The clone considered the name and then shook his head. "Nah."

They had fun coming up with a name for the Superkid duplicate. Derrick came up with most of the names, grinning in satisfaction since he thought that each name was genius then growling when his friends turned them down.

"Well, you've got to pick a name!" Derrick snapped irritably, "otherwise, Doctor Red will just call you Superkid Clone! Or SKC for short..." Then he brightened, "Wait! That's it! SuperKC! See, it's perfect! SuperKC... Superkid Clone! And the initials sound like a name: Casey!"

They all thought about it. Then the clone nodded. "Yeah, actually, that's a good idea."

"Your first, Derrick," Darrin said.

They all laughed. Then there was a knock on the door and then Mrs. Terrell stuck her head in the room.

"Hi, I was hoping to catch you before you left," she puffed--it was quite a trip from her house. That is one dedicated woman! "Here I finished it." She tossed in the blue and orange costume. Darrin caught it then tossed it to SuperKC, who caught it then held it up.

She hadn't changed it much but she had changed the essential part: the emblem. Instead of a yellow K within a yellow circle, it was now a blue K and a blue C that overlapped it slightly, within a blue oval.

"What do you think?" Mrs. Terrell asked with an eager smile.

SuperKC studied it two seconds more. Then he said, "It's perfect."

"It's spooky," Derrick added quietly to Darrin. "How did she know what name we picked for him?"

***

And now that the benevolent doppelganger has been equipped with the proper wardrobe for the clone of a hero, it is time for the final battle! The showdown between creation and creator--plus the DNA donor! Some dramatic music would be appropriate here. Maybe someday literature will be able to make use of audio for cases like these, but alas, today is not the day. Maybe you can just hum your favorite dramatic theme.

You humming? All right! To the action!

Dr. Red twisted on the cap to his odd gun--and I do mean odd. It had a banana-shaped tank on top with some strange orange liquid inside that looked like crayon scribble... just imagine what crayon looks like on paper and then translate that into a liquid form in a banana-shaped tank. That wasn't your head exploding, was it? Hope not because I need you coherent enough to get through this exciting conclusion. Just forget about the orange crayon liquid in the banana-shaped tank and move down the gun where various tubes full of variously colored liquids and gases trailed to various parts of the gun--including the trigger--variously... Ooh, that sounded like it hurt. Anyways, he lifted it into the air.

"At last, my other evil invention is finished! I am now armed with a weapon that fries and this one that..."

The door burst open. Dr. Red whirled around and found the Superkid clone in the doorway, glaring at him.

"It's about time you got here!" the evil doctor snapped. "But you interrupted me in the middle of my rant! Anyways, did you deal with 'your clone'?" He used his fingers to emphasize "your clone."

"Well actually," said Superkid, stepping in next to his clone, "me and him came to an agreement."

The evil doctor's brows jumped up. "You did what?"

Superkid clapped his double on the back. "Guess you forgot to make him evil."

The mad scientist frowned. "Actually, I wasn't trying to create him at all. I was going for a mutant monster that would destroy you."

The clone said, "You mean like all those other giant monsters that I--er--he beat up?" and pointed at his original self.

Red's mouth twitched in annoyance. "No, I mean a hybrid monster... like an eagle-cobra, a spider-scorpion, a bear-pony."

The clone and Superkid both gave the maniacal medical professional a strange look. "A bear-pony?" The clone repeated.

"Speed of a pony, the viciousness and strength of a bear," Dr. Red explained. "But I won't need to go through the trouble of creating that when I can just destroy you with these--" he whipped up his strange guns, "--the Pyro-Blaster and the Frost-Launcher!"

Superkid's face became strained. "Any points for originality?"

The evil doctor shrugged off-handedly. "A little overdone, perhaps, but still effective. Allow me to demonstrate." With an evil grin, he aimed his Pyro-Blaster at the two heroes.

They immediately split and circled around toward the doctor. He spread the guns so that both Superkids were facing the ends of gun barrels as they ran toward him.

"Roast Superkid tonight, and for dessert, chilled clone!" He laughed and fired both guns. The two Superkids skidded to a halt, but they were too late: the guns both blasted straight at them.

But it wasn't fire and ice that came out... at least, it didn't look like it. Instead, out the gun with orange-crayon liquid splashing in its banana-shaped tank came a gob of metallic green goop, and out the other gun with a big nozzle that looked like honeycombs shot a silvery purple light.

Superkid dropped backwards onto one hand, dodging the green goop. The goop slapped onto the concrete behind him. SuperKC flipped sideways away from the silvery purple light. Unfortunately, his elbow was hit as he was flipping onto his hands and he ended up falling back in the other direction with a painful thud. He cried out.

Doctor Red turned to him curiously, noting the metallic sheen on the clone's elbow. "Interesting."

"Doesn't look like fire or ice to me!" Superkid said just before he flipped into the air, kicked the diabolical doctor in the back and then flipped backwards to land on his feet. Red pitched forward onto the ground with a grunt, his weapons clattering away on the concrete.

"Grrr!" Doctor Red scrambled forward and snatched the gun with the honeycomb nozzle. He wheeled around, which put him in a seated position, and fired. The silvery purple light struck Superkid directly in the stomach. He doubled over with an "oof," fell onto his head with a crack and then slumped to his side with a groan.

"Interesting," said the doctor, inspecting his gun, "an incapacitating ray. Out of curiosity, what does it feel like?" At a sound behind him, he wheeled around and fired. SuperKC leaned back to dodge the ray and then blew up his balloon-cape and rose into the air.

"It felt like my muscles were dead," he admitted. Then he quickly blew cool air into his balloon and yanked the hose, jetting himself away just before the villainous medical expert fired again.

Superkid got to his feet. "Fortunately, it seems to be temporary," he said and then sprinted away before Dr. Red spun around and fired his weapon. He stuck the hose into his mouth as he ran to the wall. Then after he leaped at the wall and kicked off into a backflip, he puffed up his balloon, which suddenly flipped him forward and lifted him into the air.

"What are you planning now?" Doctor Red asked and fired his gun at the kid hero's legs. They drooped lazily.

"Distracting you," SuperKC replied and dive-bombed the maniacal medic in the shoulders. His left leg was still floppy, so this caused Dr. Red to spin to the ground with a loud "oof!" His landing was made all the more painful by a lump under his back.

He roared in pain. He rolled to his stomach and turned his head to see what it was that he had landed on, with the irrational intent of making it pay for its crime. He was made rational pretty quickly when he saw the orange-crayon liquid rippling in the banana-shaped tank.

Though he was still in pain, he forced himself to reach for the blaster and secure a grip on it. He then dragged it toward himself until he could use it to slowly push himself to his feet.

"You all right?" SuperKC called from the air in mock concern.

Dr. Red straightened himself and grimaced when a bolt of pain shot through his spine. He grunted, "I'm fine. Thanks for your concern."

"That looked painful," Superkid remarked with a grin.

"Yes, it was," the evil doctor agreed. He lifted the so-called Pyro-Blaster at him. "But probably not as painful as what will come out of this gun!" He pulled the trigger. He had been looking the other way when he had first fired this gun so he was surprised when metallic green goop shot out and engulfed Superkid's limp foot.

Superkid's leg jerked straight with a pop of his knee and he began to descend. His still-full balloon wobbled in the air as he descended as though desperately trying to pull him back up. The green goop was pulling him to the ground!

He landed on the concrete with a "clack." The green goop had hardened and was now anchoring his foot to the ground. The rest of his body was trying to get back into the air and it was creating quite a tug-of-war between his leg and his hip, which meant a lot of pain for him.

After watching with a surprised look on his face, the evil doctor chuckled, "Looks like you're grounded. What are you going to do now?"

Superkid puffed cool air into his balloon-cape and yanked the hose. But rather than shoot forward, his goop-covered foot dragged across the concrete with a scraping sound. After scraping forward about three feet, his balloon fell limply against his back and he dropped onto his feet then his knees and hands.

The malevolent doctor grinned nastily as he pointed his gun at him. "I've got you now."

"Don't forget I'm here," said SuperKC behind him. Dr. Red turned just in time to get kicked in the stomach, which sent him staggering backwards. Superkid dropped onto his hands and flung his goop-covered foot outward with all his might, kicking the doctor as he was stumbling and causing him to reverse direction. SuperKC dodged out of the way since the evil doctor was waving his guns so wildly. Dr. Red stumbled forward, twirled, and stumbled backwards but managed to recover his balance after a moment.

"You little traitor!" he roared, lifted both guns at SuperKC, and fired them both. The clone of our hero leaned backwards to avoid the beam and the goop. Superkid behind him was already leaning back and so the beam and goop missed him also, most fortunately. After kicking Doctor Red's back, his goop-covered foot had continued its momentum and flipped him into a crablike position. And a good thing too.

But while this had been a good position to dodge the hazardous projectiles for both Superkids, Dr. Red also smelled opportunity for him in it. Wasting no time, he aimed his honeycomb-nozzle gun at SuperKC as he was erecting himself and fired. SuperKC's legs suddenly went dead and he fell backwards again with a clonk to his head.

The menacing medical professional hurried to the carbon copy of his nemesis and planted his foot on his chest. He pointed the Green Goop Gun--the GGG for short... or maybe Triple G... yeah, we'll go with that. He pointed the Triple G at the clone and growled, "You have been a thorn in my side for far too long..."

"You created me only three weeks ago!" the clone protested.

Red just growled, "Regardless, I'm exterminating this pest once and for all! I'm going to shoot this into your nose. I'm curious to see what happens, aren't you?" He grinned nastily.

SuperKC responded by clapping both hands over his mouth and nose. He wasn't at all curious because he had a pretty good idea what might happen. He had seen enough to know that a) it was a green goop that became hard, and b) it was very heavy, which meant that if that stuff got in his nose, either he would suffocate to death or his nose would be pulled into his brain! Yech! Sometimes mad science can really test your appetite.

The duplicate Superkid was valiantly shielding his nose and mouth from certain goop--as opposed to "doom" ...it's a pun... never mind--but the villainous doctor was not going to be thwarted that easily! He simply raised the other gun with the honeycomb nozzle and fired. It wasn't long at all until the clone's arms became limp then slithered to the ground with a flop. His nose and mouth were now completely exposed.

Dr. Red grinned evilly as he raised the Triple G. "I have you now. Nothing is going to stop me from destroying you. Say goodbye, Superkid."

SuperKC could only glare defiantly at his evil creator--with his arms lying limply and unhelpfully beside him--and wait for the really evil doctor to fill his head with liquid metal.

Now you would think the certified doctor would have learned by now to watch his back for the other Superkid. Maybe he was just so focused on eliminating any and all evidence of Superkid's existence that he shut everything out? It's a stretch, I know, but it is possible, isn't it? And besides, we wouldn't want the bad guy to have too many advantages, now would we?

Rewinding a bit to where the green goop and purple light passed over Superkid in his crablike position, we find that after his close brush with... uh... mad science, he lifted himself just high enough to see Doctor Red shoot the Dead-Arm Laser--DAL for short; I am on a roll today!--at SuperKC, knocking him to the ground. When our hero saw the mad doctor going for our hero's duplicate, he started to circle around behind Red but was yanked back by the heavy goop cemented around his foot. He shot a glare at it in frustration.

_I need to get this stuff off!_ he thought. Unfortunately, he didn't have time to figure out how. His clone was at the mercy of the mad doctor and it was up to Superkid to stop him.

He put his uncovered foot forward and then heaved his hardened-goop foot forward. He nearly fell into the splits when his lead-heavy foot swung ahead of him and landed with a clonk on the concrete. After stabilizing himself with an irritated grunt, he did this again, stepping forward and then swinging his heavy foot forward but with less force this time. This seemed to work for he had done it without accidentally trying to rip his legs apart. So utilizing this technique, he awkwardly clonked his way around the back of Dr. Red. But as he was clonking, he noticed that chunks of the green goop were breaking off. He looked back and saw a trail of green-goop chunks behind him.

He grinned to himself. "So there is a way to get this stuff off, after all! The stuff's brittle!"

He could break it if he could swing his foot at something with enough force. But what could he swing it at? He quickly looked around and almost immediately discovered the worktable. Its legs appeared to be solid steel rods about an inch in diameter. It might just work.

He quickly clonked his way to the table. Then he twisted himself to the side, got on his hands and then heaved his goop-covered foot at the table leg.

With a crack, the goop broke apart and fell into a pile. Superkid pumped his fists and yelled, "All right!" Then he spotted Dr. Red with his foot on SuperKC. His clone's arms were lying limply on the ground at his side, which Superkid guessed meant the doctor had used the DAL on him. And now the evil doctor was aiming his Triple G at SuperKC with the apparently evil intention of drowning him in heavy goop!

Superkid didn't have much time. He could probably make it if he ran at him, but there was something else he could do that was faster. He seized a chunk of the metallic green goop that had previously encased his foot and grunted in surprise when he discovered how heavy it was. Though it was the size of a toy truck, it felt like he was hefting a brick of solid iron! But mustering all of his strength, Superkid swung his arm back and then slung it forward with a mighty grunt.

He had been aiming for Dr. Red's arm. But as heavy as it was, it was still a pretty good shot. It struck the side of his knee instead, causing him to buckle, which caused him to wave his gun away from SuperKC's face. When Red recovered, he turned with a scowl on his face, only to be tackled by Superkid. This only succeeded in pushing him off of SuperKC for he was still upright. Still, it was rather annoying to have a kid clinging to your waist. So he used his DAL to club his nemesis on the head. Superkid immediately let go to clutch the lump that was forming where the malevolent medical professional had struck him. The malevolent medical professional, meanwhile, stumbled back from the sudden release but managed to raise his gun and fire.

The goop struck Superkid right on the chest--right over the symbol. It splattered in a lumpy circle before it hardened and became heavy. It dropped, ripping off the cloth from Superkid's chest and leaving it bare before clacking to the concrete. In surprise, Superkid looked down at it then at the gaping hole in his costume. Finally, he looked up at the diabolical doctor.

"What is it with you and my clothes?" he asked.

Dr. Red grew purple in the face. "I never intentionally try to remove them; it just happens!"

"Right." Our hero suddenly slammed his shoulder into the evil doctor, sending him stumbling away. Dr. Red flailed, which as a consequence caused him to smack Superkid's head with his gun. Superkid went reeling, and Doctor Red who had recovered lifted his gun at his arch-nemesis.

From behind, SuperKC kicked him. Doctor Red grunted and then whirled on him. SuperKC used his elbow to knock the Triple G out of the evil medic's hand. He tried to grab the other gun but when he tightened his grip, a bolt of pain shot through it, knocking it dead. He figured, _it must be the effects of that ray of Red's_ , so instead the clone lifted his leg and, with the flat of his foot, pushed Dr. Red back. Red stumbled backwards where Superkid was waiting with his foot stuck out. The malevolent doctor tripped and fell onto his back with a painful thud.

SuperKC scooped up the Triple G but dropped it when the gun's weight sent another bolt of pain through his arm that killed it again. Superkid had seen, so he hurried over and snatched up the gun instead. Then he turned it toward the fallen villain.

"Don't move," he commanded.

It looked like this doctor was about to get a taste of his own medicine. But doctors are more used to giving prescriptions than taking them--especially this one. The malevolent Doctor Red propped himself on one elbow, took aim with his DAL, and fired.

Reflexively, Superkid fired the Triple G. The goo appeared to absorb most of the light when it turned a rather ugly brownish-purple as it sailed through the air. Much of the remaining light permeated the Triple G, which Superkid held protectively against his chest, while the rest saturated his fingers. As a result, the Triple G slipped out of his fingers and clattered to the ground. A crack appeared in the banana-shaped tank.

On the other end of the draw, the metallic green goop sailed toward Dr. Red. His eyes widened and he immediately began scrambling backwards to avoid the goopy missile, but he only managed to scoot back three feet when the goop splattered all over his foot. He tried to wipe it off by raising his foot and using his gun, but he only managed to shape it into a funny-looking haircut before it became as hard as a rock and just as heavy. His foot fell with a clack. He tried to lift it, grunting with the effort, but he soon dropped it again. He looked down at it in surprise.

"That _is_ heavy."

SuperKC picked up the Triple G and aimed it at his original self's archenemy. His original self's archenemy lifted his DAL in response but grunted in surprise when he discovered hardened green goop clinging to the honeycomb nozzle, dragging the gun from his grip. Still he struggled to keep it from bobbing as he tried to aim for the clone pointing his own gun at him.

The clone aimed briefly at Doctor Red's other foot and pulled the trigger. The goo splattered the other foot and within five seconds was hard and heavy.

He came around to the mad doctor's right side. The doctor wheeled his heavy weapon to him in a desperate attempt to stop him. But SuperKC calmly aimed the Triple G and fired the goo, which splashed against Red's wrist. Red, who hadn't learned yet, frantically tried to wipe the goo off. But within five seconds, both his hands were dragged to the floor, pulling him forward so that he was leaning toward his feet painfully.

"You little pests!" Doctor Red snarled. "How dare you do this to me! Aaaaaaargh!"

SuperKC winced at the evil doctor's discomfort. He motioned to his original self and said, "Help me lay him down."

Superkid wasn't one to let anyone suffer needlessly, even if they were evil villains, so he did as his duplicate asked. On either side, they helped to first raise him away from his feet then lower him to the ground. Doctor Red attempted to lift his arms to beat at his foes, as to be expected, but the goop weighed them down too much. Once they had him rested comfortably on the ground--as comfortably as you can be on cold concrete--they studied him. He glared at them in return--absolutely no gratitude for the kindness they showed him.

No, rather than gratitude, he showed them contempt when he asked, "So what's your plan now? Leave me here until I die of dehydration?"

"Oh no, you won't be here that long." Superkid grinned. "We'll just leave you here until the police come to pick you up. They've been itching to cuff you."

The evil doctor growled and tried lifting his arms again. He eventually gave up, letting his hands clonk to the ground, and said, "To think I created a second you--the most nettling thorn I have ever had in my entire life!"

"Oh, Red!" Superkid gasped in falsetto while pretending to blush. "We've only met twice and here you are, paying me with the greatest compliment I've ever gotten!"

The mad doctor roared as he gave a great heave in an attempt to get to his feet, but the goop still held him down. With a vein pulsing in his sweaty forehead, Red snarled, "I swear to you, Superkid--and you too, clone!--for as long as I live, I will haunt you. I will threaten your friends and your families. I will torment your every waking moment. I will make you wish you were never born! I will..."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," said Superkid, waving dismissively. "Revenge, watch my back, blah blah blah."

SuperKC added, "It just means we just beat you and now you're being a poor sport."

The mad doctor growled. "But what about what you promised me? I thought you were going to destroy Superkid."

SuperKC glanced at his original self. His original self looked back and shrugged. Then SuperKC turned back to Red and explained, "We got a few things straightened out with each other. We now know who the real Superkid and the real clone is."

Doctor Red glanced at the insignia on the duplicate's chest. "KC... Kid Clone?"

"Exactly. I'm now known as SuperKC." He puffed out his chest. Then he turned, waved to the anchored villain over his shoulder, and said, "That was fun. If you ever escape from jail, we ought to battle again."

"No! You little vermin! Come back here! Get me out of here! No! I will get you! Nooooooo!" And on and on he spat and cursed as Superkid tossed him a smug grin and a wave before hurrying after his duplicate self.

Chapter 10

The Clone's Farewell

Once they were outside the doctor's lab, the clone turned to his original self. He swallowed a lump in his throat and looked into the dry, dusty sagebrush.

"I guess this is the part where you and I say goodbye," he said quietly.

Superkid swallowed his own lump. "Where will you go?"

SuperKC shrugged. "Wherever I'm needed, I guess."

"How are you going to live?" Superkid persisted.

SuperKC stared out towards the mountains and didn't reply for a while. Finally, he answered, "Guess I'll find out when I get there..." He turned back to his carbon copy and attempted a grin. "It's probably not so bad living in the streets. I won't have to listen to anyone tell me to go to bed anyways."

"Just make sure you don't take anyone else's territory," Superkid joked with a weak smile. "I hear street bums get mean if you mess with their cardboard boxes."

They both chuckled but their chuckles quickly died. They shuffled uncomfortably in the silence.

Finally, Superkid murmured, "I'll miss you, friend."

SuperKC smiled. "Even though at first I thought you were trying to take my place, I couldn't help but like you. I guess you just can't hate yourself," he added with a laugh. Then he swallowed and finished, "I'll miss you too."

He slowly extended his hand. Superkid slowly took it and they solemnly shook. Then SuperKC took his hose and blew hot air into it. His balloon-cape inflated and soon he was rising.

"Remember," the clone said as he rose, "you're the town's only protection against the villains like Doctor Red, Black Belt, Vampire, and that giant spider. Don't let them down!"

"And make sure that wherever you end up, you're a pain in the rear to all the wrong-doers!" Superkid shouted back.

SuperKC waved to show he heard. Then he took his hose and blew cool air into it. As he maintained cool air flow into his balloon, he pulled the hose, which let the air escape and push him across the desert.

Superkid stood and watched as his friend drifted further and further away from him until he was no more than a speck on the big orange sun sinking behind the mountains. Then he turned and began his own trek home.

And thus concludes the adventures of Superkid and the clone. Oh, what a sad ending! His carbon copy drifting off into the sunset--oh, it's so cliché but still so sad!

All right, I need a change of mood. Fortunately, I have the cure coming right up! One good old cliffhanger ought to do the trick!

Epilogue

The police surrounded the abandoned factory, approaching it cautiously. They had their guns out and their cuffs handy where they needed it. Chief Pamerin led two officers behind him as they approached the door. He turned to them and put a finger to his lips. They nodded to show they understood but rolled their eyes when he turned away.

Pamerin reached slowly for the knob. He twisted it ever so gently. He pushed it open with a loud, metallic screech (he had meant to do it quietly). He stuck his gun through the door and then his head followed. He looked around the large assembly room for their criminal but could see no trace of him.

With a professional flick of his wrist, he said to his team, "Search the factory. He should be here somewhere. Superkid told us that he's weighed down by _metallic green goop_." He made a face as though wondering what kind of code that was.

The team did a professional search of the factory while Chief Pamerin waited for them to report back. After a while, several of them came back with this news, "We've searched the building but we can't find him. We think he may have escaped, sir."

Pamerin argued, "But we have this place surrounded! You sure you've looked everywhere?"

"Everywhere," another officer confirmed, "the offices, the main floor, the locker room, the lockers, and even all the toilet stalls, all clear... technically." He tried to keep his face from turning red. No need to tell the chief about the intrusion on a fellow officer while doing his... business.

The chief's face, however, did turn red but for a different reason. "How could he have slipped from under our noses?"

The officer was about to reply when someone called them over. When they got there, they saw their fellow officers taping off the area and snapping photos. Chief Pamerin narrowed his eyes. "What is this?"

A young officer answered, "We think we found the spot where Dr. Red had been weighed down."

"And how can you tell that?"

The young officer waved inside the taped-off area. There were blocks of metallic green substance that were shattered in four separate piles. Another officer picked up a block and, grunting, lifted it for the chief to see.

The young officer pointed, "A handprint. Dr. Red's hand must have been in it. And, as you can see, it's very heavy."

The other officer released it with a cry of relief, which shattered on the concrete at the chief's foot.

Chief Pamerin shook his head. "But he's not here anymore." He kicked the shattered block then yelped and hopped on his foot. When he had calmed down, he grunted, "The devil's escaped. We'd better warn Superkid. I've got a feeling the doctor's seeking revenge."

And with that dire message running a chilly finger down our spines, this edition concludes!

Ah, but before you close this edition, there are some rumors that I'd like to start up:

1. There will be a new series of adventures starring SuperKC, with all new friends and villains.

2. Superkid himself will meet new villains--as well as some old ones.

3. The Vampire will be back for vengeance though probably not where you'd expect her.

Now that I've given you something to gossip to the members in your Superkid Fan Club, you can go ahead and close this edition. Hurry up! Go spread the rumors!
