(upbeat music)
- Good afternoon, Rubyconf.
(audience applause and cheers)
Nice, good atmosphere, good start.
Okay, my name's Andrew Faraday.
Some of you may remember me
from last year's Rubyconf
and I once again been
given the fantastic honor
of presenting the most
British thing possible
(audience laughs)
in the United States for
Rubyconf which is brilliant.
Well folks, this is a
sort of conversation game
and basically I'll be
challenging panelist to speak on
a variety of topics I'll be giving them
and they have some ways they must not say
the things they are saying.
They must avoid hesitation,
repetition, or deviation.
So this is really a game for programmers
partly because it's quite analytical,
it's quite involved an
involved cerebral game.
It's also a very narrow
set of requirements
and millions of cases.
That's how the game works
and that's the space
in which our panelist will be playing.
Now the game, it is very
difficult and they're all
very brave for standing in
front you and playing the game.
(audience applause and cheers)
When you feel the panel have done well,
by all means do raise your
voices, put your hands together,
let us know that you feel
we are doing it well here,
we do need some encouragement.
The game also involves
challenges where the panelists
will pick each other up on
whether they feel those rules
have been broken and
those can be subjective.
So if you feel that they
have been unruly harsh,
by all means do let me and
the panel know that as well
and there's one last far
more important thing I need from you.
Now the show always starts
exactly the same way,
with an exuberant statement of welcome
and the theme music and as soon
as you hear that piano music
kick in I need you all to
raise the proverbial roof.
(audience laughs)
Can you do that for me?
(audience lauds)
Okay, here goes.
Welcome to Just a Minute.
(audience cheers)
(piano music)
That's right, good afternoon and welcome
to a very special edition
of Just a Ruby Minute
here in the fine city of Cincinnati, Ohio.
We're half way through
day one of Rubyconf 2016.
Now we're gonna play a few rounds
of the game called Just a Minute.
The beloved elder relative
of all panel games
and what's gonna happen each round,
they're going to choose one
of the witty, insightful,
and of course horrified individuals
currently arrayed before you.
I've given a topic
that's of some interest
to Ruby developers.
They'll be challenged to speak
about that without hesitation
including pauses, hedging
noises, elongation of words,
repetition of words that
particular panelist has used
during the current round, or
deviation when they're simply
no longer talking about the
topic they have been given.
Now if those rules are
broken, panelist can challenge
by pressing their buzzers,
the timer will stop,
and if the challenge is
correct, they'll gain a point
but also gain control of the topic
and the time where it was
left, they'll be allowed
to continue speaking
until the minute is over
or they are in turned
challenged, whoever is speaking
at the end of the minute will
gain a point for doing so,
and incorrect challenges
will pass control back
to the original speak
along with an extra point.
So that's the rules,
they're all very simple,
it's a lot of fun, do play along with us
and let's meet the panel, shall we?
So first up and furthest from me,
Aspect maintainer Sam Phippen.
(audience applause and cheers)
Next along the line we have the mind
behind Goat User Stories,
please welcome Tara Scherner de la Fuente.
(audience applause and cheers)
Next up we have the owner
of two Ruby famous cafs
and the founder of the Friday hug,
please welcome Aaron Patterson.
(audience applause and cheers)
And last but certainly not least,
a huge part of both
Kubmo and Bridge Foundry,
Kinsey Ann Durham.
(audience applause and cheers)
Excellent, Sam Phippen,
you are first up to speak
and your topic is the worst
bug I have introduced.
(Sam laughs)
Starting with a difficult one so--
- That isn't even spelled write.
(everyone laughs)
Deviation from the english language.
- I'll allow repetitions of
both introduced and introduced.
(everyone laughs)
That is entirely my fault.
You have 60 seconds starting now.
- The worst bug I have introduced,
sorry should that be introduced,
was this one time in
production when I decided
it would be a good idea
to flush a redis-cache
that actually wasn't just being
used as a cache but also--
(buzz)
Thank you.
- Repetition of cache.
- Repetition of cache, completely correct
and Patterson has a point.
- Ah ha ha, yes.
(everyone laughs)
Wow.
- For those of you who missed last year,
Aaron was on round four before.
(everyone laughs)
He's thrilled.
Aaron, you have 45 seconds starting now.
- The worst bug I have
introduced is something
that I don't really want to talk about
because it is embarrassing to me.
(buzz)
(Aaron laughs)
- I didn't want to press it.
Hesitation.
- Hesitation, definitely.
Kinsey's got a point and a fan
(audience laughs)
and you have 35 seconds starting now.
The worst bug I have introduced
wasn't necessarily a bug
but my pair and I, Kim
Barnes, who is actually
sitting in the audience
right now, right there--
(buzz)
- Yes.
(everyone laughs)
- Repetition of right.
- Repetition of right, absolutely correct.
So Aaron, you have 23 seconds
on the worst bug I have
introduced starting now.
- As I was saying before I was so rudely
interrupted by Kinsey again--
(buzz)
- Deviation, he's talking
about the interruption
and not the subject itself.
- No, no.
I was continuing.
(audience cheers)
- Boo.
- No.
- I've got to give you that, Sam.
So you have 18 seconds
remaining starting now.
- The worst bug I have introduced
is an interesting subject
because we as programmers
spend so much time introducing
bugs into the systems--
(buzz)
- I was gonna say repetition of bugs
because he said it the first time.
- Say bugs before?
- The plural, the first time.
Does anyone remember?
- I don't think that's cool.
- I don't remember...
To be clear, that would be--
- Am I suppose to be
pressing this button by the way?
(everyone laughs)
You certainly could've done and...
- I did hear bugs before, it would've been
a legitimate challenge but
of course I don't think
that was so Sam you got a point,
you have seven seconds
remaining starting now.
- The worst bug I have introduced
a topic that we can discuss
here at the conference as--
(horn)
- Repetition of we.
(audience applause)
You said we like eight times today.
- So Sam Phippen gets the
point for the end of that round
and takes the early lead.
Tara.
(chuckling)
You're first to speak in this round.
This one was selected especially for you,
Goat User Stories.
So this is Tara Scherner de la Fuente.
Goat User Stories starting now.
- When I was working at
Living Social with at least
one member of the audience,
I created Goat User Stories
with the DevOps manager, Matt Robinson.
We really enjoyed talking
about Goats in the office
and we made up user stories
where we drew goats on--
(buzz)
- Repetition of Goats.
- Yes.
- Oooh.
- You could've repeated
goat but not Goats.
There's also some hesitation.
- You stole the goats from me?
(laughing)
You're not getting a sticker.
(Sam guffawing)
(audience oohs)
So Sam gets a point but
not a sticker for that?
You have 34 seconds starting now.
- The reason I like Goat User Stories
is that I find that very
relatable to my everyday work
as a developer who faces
users building systems
that also need to function and
listening to their stories.
The idea of a user story
comes originally from Agile
which allows us to think about ways
that we can develop our
software in reaction
to our customers with Goats I guess--
(buzz)
- Repetition of Goats.
- Yes.
- Absolutely.
- Yes!
(audience applause)
(laughing)
- And you have eight seconds remaining
on Goat User Stories starting now.
- Goat user stories is a topic
that I am extremely familiar with
because they are about users stories--
(horn)
(laughs)
(audience applause)
I didn't even know where
I was going with that.
(laughs)
- So Aaron, you got the point
in the end of that round
and draw in level with Sam Phippen.
You're next up to speak as well.
I really should have paid
more attention to my spelling.
(everyone laughs)
- You got to say it like that too.
- Again, I'll accept repetitions
both with or without the G.
This is what happens when I do
the preparation on the plane.
So, Aaron Patterson
on submitting a pull request starting now.
- When I'm submitin...
(buzz)
(chuckling)
- Hesitation.
- [Andrew] Hesitation.
- I was in the middle of saying it.
(audience boos)
- They've already turned on you.
- Geez.
- I'm actually one round
further than last year.
- Yeah, an unpopular and yet correct
challenge from Sam Phippen.
(everyone ohs)
He'll have 57 seconds.
- Sorry, not sorry.
(everyone laughs)
- You have 57 seconds starting now.
- As an Aspect maintainer,
when I'm submitting
a pull request, I find
that it's very important
to think about the contents
of the pull request,
the description, the commits,
whether I rebased correctly
and a number of other important factors--
(buzz)
- Repetition of important.
- Yes.
(audience cheers)
(Aaron laughing)
Well listened.
So Aaron, yes, you have the
point, you have 43 seconds
on submitting a pull request starting now.
- Submitting a pull request
is a thing that people do
when their hands are very cold so they--
(buzz)
(everyone laughs)
- What?
- So you managed to speak
through one bout of laughter.
- How did you beat me on the buzzer?
- I'm gonna guess I was hesitating?
- Hesitation, yeah.
So Sam, you have the point,
you have 36 seconds starting now.
- So as I was saying, when
I'm submittin a pull request,
I find that it's useful to
consider the other people
that will be reading the
context of that pull request
that I have submitted--
(buzz)
- He said I probably 10 times.
- Yeah, that was a lot of I's.
Got to give you that.
(audience cheers)
- It's not all about you, Sam.
- So Kinsey, you have a
point, you have 24 seconds
on submitting a pull request starting now.
- Submitting a pull request
to an open source project
can be very scary because
there are mean people
who maintain the libraries,
who do not want to welcome
new people doing a pull request--
(buzz)
- Repetition of people.
- Repetition of people,
completely correct.
(audience applause)
- Yeah, my first challenge ever.
- Well listen, Tara you
have the last six seconds
of this round starting now.
- Submittin or submitting
a pull request is very
important when you--
(horn)
Yes.
(audience cheers)
So that was Tara Scherner
de la Fuente speaking
at the end of that round per second point.
Kinsey, you're next to start.
This topic could've started else where.
The topic is Moving to New York
which I should explain for
anyone whose unaware of this,
Sam Phippen has just recently done.
Kinsey has 60 seconds of moving
to New York starting now.
- Moving to New York would be awesome
because there's a lot
of good food and people
and things to do in the city.
Moving to New York would be
expensive because a lot--
(buzz)
- Repetition of because.
- Yes, repetition of because.
(small clap)
(everyone laughs)
- Or don't.
- So Sam, you've gained that point,
you have 45 seconds starting now.
- Moving to New York is a song
by The Wombats, the seminal--
(buzz)
- Deviation.
- It was on the topic of Moving
to New York by The Wombats.
- It was very clear that
that was the topic at hand.
- Okay.
- Alright, okay, you're the judge.
(audience laughs)
- So Sam, you've gained the point,
you have 40 seconds
remaining starting now.
- As I was saying, this
piece of music by the band
whose name I mentioned
in my earlier speech
and so won't mention in this one--
(buzz)
- Repetition of mention.
- Oh.
(audience applause)
- How do I, I can't drop that.
(everyone laughs)
- So it was correct,
you've gained the point,
you have 33 seconds starting now.
- Moving to New York is
something that Sam Phippen
has recently done to--
(buzz)
(everyone laughs)
- Buzzed before saying it.
- I'm guessing that's hesitation?
- Yes, it is, sorry.
- Okay, Kinsey you have
26 seconds starting now.
- Moving to New York is fun because--
(buzz)
- Repetition of because
from her earlier speech.
- Oh.
(audience ohs)
(Kinsey groans)
- That was correct because when
she was speaking earlier she said because.
- I don't know what to say about this.
(everyone laughs)
- Whoever was clapping,
you're my favorite person.
- Okay, Sam, you have the topic,
you have 19 seconds starting now.
- Moving to New York was a
really interesting process--
(buzz)
- Repetition of interesting.
He said that the first
time you were speaking.
(audience applause)
- It was less interesting this time.
- I'll give you that,
you have 15 seconds
remaining starting now.
- Moving to New York is--
(buzz)
I don't know what to say about this.
I can't do this.
- Clearly hesitation.
- [Andrew] Clearly hesitation.
Absolutely correct Sam.
You have 10 seconds remaining
and indeed 10 points starting now.
- So far, I've rather
enjoyed moving to New York
although at times it has been
a little bit difficult and scary.
There are many things that happen in the--
(buzz)
(audience applause)
- I don't like that subject.
- Sam Phippen consolidating that lead.
Speaking at the end of the
round and you are in fact
ardent to speak in the next round.
Your topic is why I code with Ruby.
- Ruuuby.
- You don't have to say Ruuuby.
- Wait, whose turn is it?
- You may.
- It's me.
- Oh, okay.
- It's Sam, yeah.
So Sam, you have 60 seconds starting now.
- Why I code with Ruby.
What a great question.
I mean, really, why does
anyone code with Ruby?
In this room, I feel like
we can get a lot of answers
to that question that we
might otherwise ask why--
(buzz)
- Repetition of, oh...
(everyone laughs)
There was repetition in there.
- There was a repetition for...
- Questioned, repetition for question.
- Yes, yeah.
(audience applause)
- So I'm gonna give
Kinsey and that section
of the audience a point.
- There's no rule that
says they can't help me.
I knew there was repetition.
- So, Kinsey, you 42 seconds
on why I code with Ruby starting now.
- Why I code with Ruby
is a very good question
because Ruby was the first language
that I started programming with.
Why I code with Ruby is because
the community is so awesome.
Look around this room.
There are so many people--
(buzz)
- Repetition of so.
(Aaron groans)
- Yeah, I said it probably four times.
- I'm gonna call that
an incorrect challenge.
- Oh.
- Wait, really?
- So, Kinsey, you have the point,
you have 21 seconds
(Kinsey clearing throat loudly)
on why I code with Ruby
(audience laughs)
starting now.
- Why I code with Ruby would be
an interesting pregunta to ask.
(audience groans)
The rest of the audience in this room--
(buzz)
- Deviation from english.
(audience laughs and ohs)
- I have two points people.
(everyone laughs)
At least cheer my challenge.
(audience hollers)
- Yeah, I'll take that.
- I was told I could speak
in a different language.
- Yeah, usually I would
completely allow that one
although I don't have the language skills
to tell if it work as a sentence.
(audience laughs)
However, yeah...
- Yes, thank you.
- Okay.
- Notice the end of my last name.
(audience laughs)
- I'm gonna give that one to Tara
(everyone woohs)
and you have 12 seconds on
why I code with Ruby starting now.
- Why I code with Ruby
is because I do not code
with Python, Java, JavaScript, Pearl--
(buzz)
(audience applause)
- No.
- Oh come on.
- Boo.
- I didn't say comma.
(audience laughs)
- Java and JavaScript
are two different words.
- I'm not even gonna challenge.
- I'm waiting.
- Hesitation on the challenge.
- Yeah.
(audience cheers)
- I am going to judge that I
did not hear any hesitation
and Java and JavaScript are
clearly two different words
so that was an incorrect challenge.
(laughing)
So Tara, you have a point,
you have 2.1 seconds
remaining starting now.
- Why I code with Ruby--
(horn)
(audience cheers)
- Nicely done, Tara.
- You speaking at the end of that round.
- Thank you for your audience
participation on these...
- Again the point for doing
so, you're also first up
to speak in the next round Tara
so your topic is when to stop coding.
Tricky question so you have
60 seconds starting now.
- There are so many ways to
know when to stop coding.
One of those is
when it is 2 AM or 3 AM.
(buzz)
(audience laughs)
- He was going to do it,
that's the only reason
I pressed the button.
- I saw him about to touch it.
I am not gonna point.
- I knew what I done
wrong, it's totally fair.
- I just wanted to let you know that.
- Totally, totally fair.
- So I'm guessing we're
in the repetition of AM.
- Yeah.
- Completely correct.
Kinsey, you have the point
and 48 seconds starting now.
- When to stop coding is a great question
because a lot of people don't
stop coding when they should.
You need to take a break,
go eat, and ride a bike,
and fish in the river which is
what I like to do when I stop coding.
When to stop coding is
something that we should teach
junior developers to do so they don't
develop something called burnout.
It's a very common thing that happens
when you don't know when to stop coding.
When to stop coding should
be taught at coding--
(buzz)
(audience ohs)
- Repetition of should,
like, so many times.
- However, that was 53 seconds.
- Yeah.
(audience cheers)
- I am impressed, however that was
a completely correct challenge,
Tara you have a point,
you have 7 seconds on when
to stop coding starting now.
- When to stop coding is a question Kinsey
was addressing quite nicely
before I interrupted her.
(horn)
(everyone laughs)
(audience applause)
- So Tara speaking at
the end of that round,
you got the point, you're
currently tied second place--
- I got a new strategy.
- I started with such a strong lead.
(everyone laughs)
- Aaron, you are first
to speak in this round.
Your topic is an interesting one.
What to put in ApplicationController.
(everyone laughs)
Just to be clear, I
will accept repetitions
about application and
control as separate words.
There are sort of one word, sort of two.
So you have 60 seconds starting now.
- What to put in ApplicationController
is an interesting topic to speak about
because what I like to put
in ApplicationController
is all of my code, like,
as if ApplicationController
was a CGI bin file where I
would just dump everything
that I could ever possibly
think of into that file--
(buzz)
(Aaron laughs)
- Repetition of everything and file.
- Yes.
(audience applause)
Completely correct, Kinsey.
- You have 39 seconds,
what to put in
ApplicationController starting now.
- What to put in ApplicationController
is an interesting question to ask.
I personally put all of my
model logic like user RB
into my ApplicationController
because I don't really know
what should go in a ApplicationController
because I rarely open that
file and at my current job
I know if I open that file--
(buzz)
Oh shoot.
(Aaron groaning)
- Repetition of file.
- Yes, you could've had a
repetition of open as well.
- I thought you had it.
Sam got that point?
- Yes.
(Sam laughs)
- So Sam, you have 13
seconds starting now.
- What to put in ApplicationController
is a interesting question
that we can discuss here
at this conference as
a number of developers
who work in the Ruby programming language,
naturally we end up writing--
(buzz)
- Repetition of we.
- It was only two.
- Still, that's repetition.
- Did anyone hear...
(audience groans)
- Yeah, yeah.
(clapping)
- I got to give you that.
I don't particularly wish
to enrage the audience
against these guidelines.
(everyone laughs)
A second and a half remaining
on this topic starting now.
- What to put--
(horn)
(audience applause)
- So Kinsey gets the point
for the end of that round.
I think we are going to have to move
into the final round of today's game.
Kinsey, you're first to speak
and your topic is when not to commit.
Mrs. Kinsey Ann Durham, when
not to commit starting now.
- When not to commit is a good question
because I really never
know when I should commit.
That's when I ask my manager,
hey can you look at this
before I commit because I really
don't want to piss her off.
(buzz)
- Repetition of because.
(audience laughs)
- No.
- I didn't hear because before.
Did anyone...
- Did I say because twice?
- She said it at the beginning, and yeah.
(Aaron groans)
- Mumbles in a sense.
I've ruled against some quite a lot.
I'm gonna give him that point
and 45 seconds on when not
to commit starting now.
- When not to commit
is not just a question
that we can apply to technology
but also to our dating lives.
In most of the time when not to commit--
(buzz)
- Deviation from good taste.
(everyone cheers)
(audience woohs)
- I think we enjoyed that
enough to earn the point there.
- There's no way I'm going
to be able to do this
for 35 seconds but I think
that was pretty good.
- That was pretty good, I'm impressed.
Okay, so you have 35 seconds starting now.
- Tomorrow in my talk I will be discussing
when not to commit and when to commit.
In that slide show, I will be presenting
a number of Goats from my Twitter account
that I hope you look at.
One of the things I'll say
about when not to commit
is that you should have a
great commitment message
and if you don't, then
you need to write one--
(buzz)
- Repetition of you?
- You're really gonna
support someone besides,
well he is kind of--
- I'm last, come on.
(laughs)
- You know, I, yeah, it's not
Sam so let's give it to him.
- I've got to give that one to Aaron.
You have 10 seconds remaining
on when not to commit starting now.
- Commit or not to commit
(audience laughs)
that is the question
that is on the screen in front of me now--
(buzz)
Oh!
(audience cheers)
- Oh yes.
- I really want to beat
Sam but it's not looking
like I'm going to.
Hesitation.
- That was a hesitation,
I have to give you that.
- Also I really don't want
to lose my first game.
- Okay, Kinsey you have
a third of a second on
when not to commit.
(everyone laughs)
- Are you gonna start the timer?
- Starting now.
- When--
(Buzz)
(audience ohs)
(everyone laughs)
(horn)
(everyone laughs)
(audience applause)
So I get a point.
I lost my one point, no.
- Okay, that was the end of today's show.
Thank you very much for listening.
I have been showing
- I didn't lose.
- my favorite thing in the world.
I just skip the challenge.
However, thank you very
much for listening.
For historical reasons,
I must now thank EMS
who created this game almost 50 years ago
and Nicolas Parson whose been hosting it
in the real world all that time.
Please...
- You should totally
give her another point
because Sam said he would
retire if he beat her
and so if you tie them,
Sam is no longer retired
and we continue mocking
him for years to come.
One more point, one more point.
- Who thinks I should
- One more point
- also draw here?
- Come on, Kinsey gets one more point.
Tie it, tie it.
Do it.
Andrew, come on.
- To be honest, I'm sorry.
- Andrew, we've lost enough popular votes
in this country lately.
(audience groans)
Please, for the love
of all that is holy,
give her another point.
We need a point, Andrew.
We need this, America needs this.
(audience laughs)
Come on, do it for America.
Do it for a Goat sticker.
(audience groans)
I will accept that, but come on,
Kinsey should really get another point.
- That's okay.
- We'll just remember this.
- Fine.
(audience cheers)
- Sam, you're still in.
You have not beat Kinsey so...
- I protest this action immensely.
- Double draw here.
- There are no hanging
chads here, my friend.
- So thank you Rubinconf for
joining in my little game.
Please do join me once again
showing appreciation
even for today's panel.
Aaron Patterson.
(audience woohs)
Tara Scherner de la Puente.
(audience woohs)
Kinsey Ann Durham and Sam Phippen.
(audience cheers)
I've been Andrew Faraday,
thank you very much.
I'll be around all week.
