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Lead authors note

On the night of 22nd of December 1999 there was an incident involving a Norwich bound train on the marsh between Great Yarmouth and Acle in East Anglia.

This book is made up of personal stories and eye witness accounts of events in the build-up and aftermath of the incident.

All accounts given are from employees of J&M enterprises who were on the train that evening.

It's taken my friends and I many years for us to come together and write down our story. This is mainly due to the tenderness of the subject and the emotional state we find ourselves in as individuals.

In today's society, everyone wants to know every detail of everything that goes on and there has to be a tell all book and a Hollywood movie for every tragedy which is in itself a tragedy.

For a long while I didn't want to do this, but as the years have gone on and circumstances have changed, those of us who have contributed felt we owed it to the memories of our lost friends to say what really happened that night.

The incident was no ordinary rail disaster, and at the risk of us all being banged up in a mental hospital, this is our story.

Jessica Reynolds Lead Author and co-founder of J&M Ent.

Epilogue by Jessica

I've never been afraid of the dark, it's just an irrational human fear of not being able to see what's out there beyond the darkness. It's the things that use the darkness to hide that we should be scared of rather than darkness itself. As children, we imagine that there are witches, monsters and ghosts hiding out there in the dark waiting to get us. However, as adults we see these fears as irrational and replace them with fear of muggers and rapists who hide in the shadows following their prey, or the burglars who use it as cover to break into your house while you're sleeping and steal your PlayStation or your TV.

Of course, the ones we should really fear are the politicians and corporations robbing us in broad daylight and messing with our services such as the NHS to line their own pockets.

My name is Jessica as it says at the top, people call me Jess, but I'm known by several names including sticky (a reference to my resemblance of a stick figure), sneezy (due to my chronic hay fever), but more recently I've been known by a different name, mummy.

I'm the co-founder of J&M enterprises along with my best friend from childhood Mandy Brown, but just because we own the company that doesn't make us important. To tell you the truth we are just a couple of former factory girls who got made redundant. I went on to work in an insurance office while Mandy did 3 years' burger flipping before we both got laid off again. After that we'd taken jobs with a so-called door to door sales company, but we quickly got fed up with the treatment we got from our boss and decided to branch out on our own. So, armed with my GCSE in business studies (Mandy didn't have one, because she did home economics) off we went.

That's the long and the short of it anyway, never for a minute did I think that less than a year and a half later we were going to be a well-established sales company employing 20 staff and earning more money than a modest girl like me, who was barely 23 could ever want or need.

To tell you the truth I was physically and mentally shattered as we were out selling 6 days a week to cover lost earnings over Christmas. That meant Mandy and myself working 3 months without a day off. Mandy and I had shared a reasonably sized flat on Rouen road just outside the new riverside complex in Norwich, since we were 2 independent 16-year-old want-aways, and these days our living area was always full of paperwork.

Every night for the past week and a half that we had been working in Great Yarmouth I had taken a few moments at the end of each evening to chill out on my own before going back to organise my team.

On each of these times I had gone to the end of the station as we waited for the train to come. Once there I'd take a few deep breaths and re compose myself, blow my nose and fix the little make up I wore and take my inhaler if I needed as I watched the lights of the train weaving its way across the darkened marsh land to meet us.

I would stare out into the blackness which ran for about 10 square miles, it's mainly marshland criss-crossed by dykes. I would dream about all sorts of things hiding out there in that open space, the ghosts of any number of people who died on the Acle straight over the years (The road which runs across the marsh and is notorious for fatal accidents).

In 1994, a group of us took a drive out to the Pleasure Beach in Great Yarmouth. My brother Dave took his lovely beautiful adrenaline junky girlfriend Sarah on a motorbike and stayed later than the rest of us for some alone time, saying they would see us in the pub back in Norwich. On their way down the Acle straight minding their own business and obeying the speed limit they were killed by a driver overtaking another car at over 70 miles an hour.

Surely, I thought if there were such things as ghosts they would want to hang around those who loved them rather than stand in a dark field for the rest of eternity.

I prefer to think of the inseparable Dave and Sarah drinking beer and riding motorbikes in heaven, just to be clear they were sober when they died.

There wasn't really anything out there on that marsh but the same sheep, cows, and horses that had been there when we crossed earlier that day. But still I was glad we had a nice warm train to take us back to Norwich, I wouldn't want to be stuck out there in the dark.

Obviously if I'd known at that moment what was going to happen to our train I would have pulled all 20 of my staff off of it and got them all taxis home at £50 a head. However even that idea would have failed because the Acle straight was shut for vital works.

As I say I was shattered and run down having worked 7 days a week for the last 12 and walking 15 + miles on 6 of them (A hazard of being the boss).

...............................................

The events of that night were put in motion way before we got on the train. It was just after 9pm, the cut off point for knocking on doors, after which we would be breaking the law. We were slowly making our way back to the station. Mandy and I always walked around the outside of the area where our staff were operating checking on our friends and colleagues while making our own sales. We would meet in the middle around 9 pm and walk back to the station together.

Mandy and I were both 23 and had known each other since we were little girls, she was adopted by a family who lived on our street and we'd been best friends for 20 years at that point (Now 35+ years). At the time, we lived together in a small flat near Riverside near Norwich city fc, we ran our business from home.

For a brief visual description, I'm about 5ft 6 tall and I was painfully skinny but not through lack of trying to gain weight. I have pale white skin with long dark hair and I wear glasses and that night wore a white winter coat over my blouse with a knee length skirt and leggings with fake fur boots to keep my toes warm.

Mandy's half a foot shorter than me but without being rude to my best friend she was quite big around the middle despite having lost nearly 4 stone (Which I am proud of her for doing) and she had chin length red hair.

We were dragging wheeled cases to carry paperwork and both of us had our own shoulder bags.

The streets which we walked were barely lit apart from the odd light escaping from under drawn curtains. There was a frostiness to the air, which made me choke.

We were both struggling a little having worked nearly 3 months without a day off to make up for the group not getting holiday pay, which is one of the down sides of our job.

Even though our staff were only given optional Saturdays in the build up to Christmas, we ended up doing paperwork on Sundays during that time meaning although our staff got Sunday off we did not.

Neither of us were feeling too well either, Mandy had a cough and I seemed to have been coming down with a cold all week, it was breaking out just in time to fall during our time off. I kept sneezing and blowing my nose into one of my large hankies as we walked hoping it would only be a short cold.

At the end of a narrow street we saw a solitary street lamp under which we stood for a moment having a quick drink of water.

As we were moving off there was a noise from the street which sounded like a sort of half cough half sneeze.

'Bless you again,' Mandy said nervously. 'That wasn't me this time' I sniffed.

'I was hoping you weren't going to say that' She shivered, 'Why are you so nervous?' I smiled 'It's just some poor sod out here going about their own business like us.'

A few moments later in the next street we heard footsteps, followed by the same half cough half sneeze noise.

Mandy froze, 'It could be a rapist waiting in the shadows to attack you' she whispered. 'You watch far too many horror movies' I told her breathlessly, 'anyway why only attack me? If they're going to rape you they're not going to ask if you prefer men or women, are they?' (Mandy is a lesbian, and was in a relationship, but it was a secret at that time, she had only come out to very few people)

'My sexuality has nothing to do with it,' she groaned, 'In the movies they always kill the fat one and rape the pretty one.'

'But it's just us' I told her, 'Your point being?' she asked, 'Well I'm not pretty' I sniffed. 'I don't think many of the boys would agree with you' She said with a little laugh, adding that most of the boys we knew fancied me, which in respect might well have been true but I didn't like to think of myself as being physically attractive because I put much more value into personality.

She knew that I hated people who judged others by their looks and although I scrub up okay I find it hard to accept complements about my own appearance despite giving them to other people.

The chatter moved on to other things and a few streets had passed by when I paused for a second to wipe my nose again, we heard the noise again. Mandy froze and looked at me. I could see her eyes shining with fright.

'Okay' I said in my usual quiet, calm, no panicking voice as I was pretty sure there was no real danger. It never hurts to make sure though. 'Let's just walk as quick as we can until we're in a lit area' I told Mandy, adding 'Just keep walking and don't look back.'

We had walked about 2 miles as fast as Mandy could walk, as although she was very fit for someone her size she's never been very fast. We were sweating like crazy by the time we reached the supermarket near the station. I took a seat outside the supermarket with our cases, While Mandy popped inside to buy nicotine patches and gum. I was very proud of her for finally stopping her smoking habit, though my years of nagging her about it had little effect, but I think I know who it was that got through to her.

She was only a few minutes so I sat on a bench in the almost empty supermarket car park with our cases. The stillness of the place was quite eerie. When I gave my snotty nose a good hard blow into my hankie the sound echoed and bounced around the car park as though it were a cave.

Suddenly there was that half cough half sneeze sound again this time it came from my left-hand side, so I stood up and looked around but I couldn't see anything.

Then with a sudden panic I realised the brief cases had been stolen along with our day's paper work. I'm not going to go into the amounts we earn being in charge of the company because that's not what it's about, but I need to say some of the paperwork in the cases belonged to our staff as well as us and we needed it to pay them and ourselves.

I was in a blind panic looking everywhere but seeing nothing. Mandy came out of the supermarket and saw me standing there in a panic. She looked from me to the empty space where the cases had been then back to me in horror.

Suddenly I saw 2 people about 50 meters away running with our cases, I pointed at them and Mandy and I instinctively set off after them. Although I enjoy a good workout, sudden sprints in cold weather were not what the doctor ordered for an asthmatic with a heavy cold. Somehow panting and wheezing I managed to catch up with the second runner (who clearly wasn't fit if I could catch him) as they turned into a dark alley.

His accomplice might however have been related to Usain Bolt, as he had sprinted off. The guy might have been unfit but he was big and strong and he grabbed me around the waist and held me against him with one arm while he dragged my case in the other.

Suddenly as I gasped for breath I heard Mandy scream from the end of the alley. 'What shall we do with them?' They guy who had me in his grasp asked his accomplice, who had come back for Mandy. His voice seemed vaguely familiar.

'Let's play with them,' He replied in a rather oddly high voice.

'This case is worth a lot to you' The heavy-set man who had me in his grip grunted in my ear.

I wasn't going to confront him, 'I'll give you a hundred pounds if you give it back now.' I told him in a terrified voice.

'£500 each and we have deal' he said.

'They're not worth anything like that even to us' I replied almost laughing.

As if we would pay a grand for them when they were worth £700 tops.

I felt myself being pushed forward into the car park. 'Look I'll pay up even if she won't' I heard Mandy shout nervously. 'It's okay I'll pay' I told her calmly, 'But there's something these idiots haven't figured out.'

'And what's that my pretty?' Said the guy with his arm around me.

'Don't ever call me pretty for starters' I told him reaching in my pocket for my tin pencil case. 'You'll have to take us to a bank to get that kind of money and even if there was a bank open at this time of night I think you might get caught.'

'She has a point' His accomplice called back. 'Okay' he replied, 'Let's do it the way they do in the movies, kill the fat one leave the pretty one to me.' With that I took my tin pencil case and swung it at his head with a bang. As he yelped in pain I slid out of his grasp and grabbed my case from him and ran.

Up ahead I saw Mandy who was being held around the neck by a young man with chestnut hair wearing a white coat, and bright orange trousers with a knee length skirt.

'Wait' I thought to myself, 'A man in orange trousers and a red skirt'

Breathlessly walking over, I tapped the chestnut headed person on the shoulder. 'Game's over Becky' I grinned. She smiled and let go of Mandy

'Got ya sweetie' she laughed, but Mandy did not look one bit amused.

I have to explain that Becky, whatever Becky was, she is one of our best friends and employees. She was well known for playing tricks on other staff and had been trying to get Mandy and myself for a while now. Now I knew it was Becky I didn't need 2 guesses to work out who the man was.

My tubby big brother Chris was making his way out of the ally way rubbing his head which was sporting a big red bump, saying 'I think we can conclude that my skinny little sister can fight off thugs.'

'You're hardly a thug you big fat pussy' I teased.

Becky grabbed hold of Mandy and gave her a hug, Mandy however pushed her off, 'This is for scaring me you bitch' She said taking a swing at Becky and slapping her across the face but it was more of a playful tap then an attempt to cause pain, then she smiled and put her arms around her in a friendly hug.

Just as they parted Becky turned and sneezed twice into the crook of her arm with exactly the same half cough half sneeze sound that had been following us through the town.

'It was you guys following us through the town' I grinned. Becky who had been wiping her nose with a rather brightly coloured hankie stopped and stared looking a little concerned.

'What's up Beck's?' Mandy asked her. She looked up at Chris and back to Becky.

'It wasn't us,' she said looking a little worried, 'We got here half an hour before you.'

'Beck's thinks somebody was following us back here.' Chris told us.

'They're gone now though' she sniffed.

'Well I'm off to the loo' Mandy announced, 'Seeing as you two almost made me wet my knickers.'

'I'm coming with you' Becky said following as Mandy turned back towards the supermarket.

'Aren't you going too sis?' Chris asked me. 'No' I replied shaking my head. 'Don't girls always go to the toilet in threes? 'Not this time.'

'I need to go though,' he pleaded. 'You can go on the train' I told him, as I nudged him in the direction of the station.

.........................................................................

As you can imagine after all that there wasn't much time to chill out.

In fact I didn't get my chill out time at all that evening.

I had found Amber, who was one of my youngest staff having her own private moment at the end of the station. Amber wasn't everyone's cup of tea, a gobby teenager, she argued a lot with the other employees but never with me or Mandy although she gave us a lot of lip and cheek.

She was trying to roll a cigarette but she was crying so hard that her hands were shaking and I had to help her, not that I condone smoking at all although an individual's actions should not affect friendship despite the fact I hate it.

I thought Amber had quit smoking, but whatever was upsetting her had obviously kicked it off again.

In fact, when Amber told me why she was crying, I'll admit I shed a few tears myself on her behalf, but I have no business talking about her problems.

Amber has agreed to tell her version of events, it's up to her whether or not she tells why she was crying.

We'd been having a little chat about things and after I gave her a quick cuddle she'd gone to the toilet to fix her make up to hide the fact that she'd been crying.

One drawback of being the boss is that you can't take a sick day off unless you're on your death bed. I felt like I was coming down with more than a cold, I was in dire need of a quick rest before collecting in the rest of the paper work from the group as it was my turn.

I collapsed down on the first seat I came to coughing heavily and smothering sneezes with a large spotted hankie in a futile effort to avoid sharing my cold with everyone. (I say futile because a lot of the group already had their own colds,) After taking a drink of water I took my inhaler to help ease the tightness in my chest.

Despite feeling so yucky I was in a positive mood having had a perfect day for the most part.

The train was alive with people, all of them from our group talking excitedly about their day. I sat there quietly smiling to myself as I listened to them all, thinking how grateful I was for their efforts. I was extremely proud of each and every one of them, for turning from a bunch of misfits (Myself and Mandy included) into the lovable bunch of almost professionals they had become.

Suddenly I felt a warm hand rubbing my back, which made me jump. I'd been so engrossed in watching everyone that I hadn't noticed my friend Sharon coming up to talk to me. If it hadn't been for my heavy cold I probably would have smelt her perfume, which she used to cover up the smell of her rather serious smoking addiction.

We all know at least one girl who is insecure about their looks. Who plasters herself in makeup rather than accept she's not a super model and embrace what she's born with (like I do). Sharon's one of those people, she's a lovely lady and I was looking for a kind way to tell her that less is more. (16 years later I'm still looking)

'Are you ok honeybun?' she asked quite loudly. I nodded and blew my nose loudly, then yawned stretching out my skinny arms.

'I'm shattered and full of cold but otherwise pretty good' I told her with a weak smile.

'How are you?' I asked, sitting up straight on the edge of the seat.

'I'm not so bad' She sighed, smiling and taking a seat on the other side of the isle.

'You on the other hand look like you need a holiday.'

'That's a lovely idea' I sniffed, 'but top of my list is a warm bath, a cup of cocoa and bed.'

'I thought you were 23 on your last birthday, not 83' she joked, giving my leg a little tug.

'I'd just like to go somewhere where it isn't Christmas' She sighed, 'If you're a single 30 something with no kids it's just a day to get drunk and wish you weren't a single 30 something with no kids.'

We did not mention the fact that Sharon had a daughter 17 years earlier who was put into care because Sharon was a child in care herself at the time, I knew she wanted to find her daughter. Amber, who was her flat mate was the same age as Sharon's daughter and I think Sharon saw her as a replacement at times.

'You know you're always welcome to join us single 20 somethings,' I told her reaching into my bag to replace my grotty hankie with a clean one. (I always kept a lot of spares)

'Anyway' I added, 'We're only the next generation of single 30 somethings in waiting. Although a holiday does seem a nice idea.'

'I came to ask if you'd seen Amber at all?' Sharon said, 'I'm worried about her.'

As I said it was completely natural as Sharon and Amber were flat mates, and were very close in a sort of mother daughter way.

I pointed her in the direction of the toilet.

'We just had a little chat about things and she's gone to the loo' I told her, being careful not to say that she was fixing her make up to make it a little less obvious that she'd been crying.

Just as I said this Amber appeared out of the toilet looking a little better but still in a bit of a state. 'What have you been up too now Mrs?' Sharon demanded of Amber. I was unsure if I should step in.

'It's okay' Amber told Sharon, regaining some of her usual swagger and sitting on the edge of the seat so that Sharon couldn't see her smiling weakly at me.

'Princess perfect was just giving me a verbal warning about my behaviour,' She said venomously, but she winked at me as she said it telling me to play along.

'Well someone needed to tell you, you were being a bitch sweet heart' Sharon told her putting a motherly arm around her shoulder across the table. 'You owe Jess an apology'

'I'm sorry I called you Princess perfect' Amber said mockingly, but the look on her face was serious as she offered her hand for me to shake which I did.

'Don't forget all the other people you need to apologise to' Sharon said sternly.

'Yes MUM' Amber replied to her in the same mocking voice she had used towards me.

'Poor kid' I thought to myself, as her friend Jack came walking up the train to join them. She moved over to the window seat so he could sit down.

As I have said, I never gave her a warning and she wasn't in any trouble, we were not the closest of colleagues or friends prior to that day but we were much closer every day since.

Sharon was right though, Amber (Who joined us in the summer after leaving school) had been a mouthy little bitch recently and some of her behaviour towards everyone had been very poor, but I knew why now.

All I saw was a teenage girl with a very rough past who was going through a horrible time, only some of which we knew about and she needed us as friends right now.

Suddenly I was almost run into by Becky who was bounding up and down the train like a Jack Russell after a ball despite the fact she had a nasty cold just like me. I know this because she stayed over the previous night at the flat I shared with Mandy and the poor thing had been coughing and sneezing all day but insisted on coming to work.

I love Becky, she is a classic case of undiagnosed ADHA, she clearly wasn't feeling well but couldn't sit down.

For a proper description of her in the light, she had short chestnut hair shaved at the back and sides and spiked in the middle, having taken off her coat she wore a green shirt, with a blue tie and a long red skirt of her own making over orange trousers. A strange combination but she pulled it off surprisingly well like a walking rainbow.

'Mandy sent me to make sure you're okay.' she grinned. 'I'm fine' I told her, warily raising my hand to respond to her high five request.

'I'll see you in a minute darling' She told me turning on her heels, then jogging back down the carriage tripping and falling to her knees as she did but she bounced back up and jogged straight on.

'I wish I had her energy?' Sharon told me passing 3 files for herself,

Jack and Amber. 'Don't we all' I smiled.

Sharon had taken a bottle of wine from her bag which she had poured into 3 glasses. She offered me one too, which I wouldn't have refused if I hadn't offered to drive Jack home later as his mum was out at her works Christmas party.

Drinking on the train after work wasn't something I encouraged on a Wednesday night (Although they usually got away with it at the end of the week) but as it was the last day before the holidays I let it go.

Sharon passed a glass to Jack, who from the look on his face thought she had given him his Christmas present. Amber however took her glass and pushed it away and stared at it twisting it in her fingers.

I looked over at Jack's left eye which was a little blue where Amber had given him a right hook 2 days earlier when he wound her up. (I don't condone violence but Jack begged me not to take any action and Amber had apologised)

'I'm guessing you've made up?' I smiled, Jack looked at Amber 'Of course I've forgiven her.' He said rubbing her shoulder. 'I can't not forgive her we have been friends too long to fall out.'

She pushed his hand away and looked out of the window as the train pulled away from the station.

'You forgive too easily' She told him still looking out of the window.

'What?' he asked with a puzzled look.

She took a deep sniff and came out with one of her twisted pearls of wisdom that I've become used to over the years which only Amber could come out with.

'If you forgive me to easily I'll just keep hurting you and I can't do that to someone I love.'

'You love me?' he asked clearly confused.

'Yeah, I do' she replied softly, 'I just don't think a girl who hits you is good enough for you and that's why I said no to being your girlfriend you deserve better.'

'But in your defence, I deserved it' he told her, 'I was being quite horrible.'

'You were telling the truth,' She said sharply as she took the glass of wine and swallowed it down in one go and went back to looking out of the window.

'I don't think I will ever understand women' Jack sighed.

Sharon gave me a mystified look, 'I don't get youngsters these days' She laughed, 'I can see why you want a holiday' I chuckled adding,

'If either of these two ever qualifies as a defence lawyer, please remind me of this conversation before I consider hiring either of them.

She grinned as I moved on to the seat where Kate and John sat arm in arm.

It was Kate's last day at work for a while at least, she and John were having their first baby together and she was due any day now. Personally, I was amazed that Kate managed to keep working as long as she did.

Kate, who happened to be Becky's identical twin (although she did her best to be different i.e. growing her hair and dying it brown) was nearest to the aisle. She struggled to stand up due to the size of her bump, 'Hey you don't need to stand' I told her.

'Yeah, I do,' she smiled and threw her arms around me, 'If you can't give your boss a hug on your last day it's a sad state of affairs.'

'Okay' I smiled returning the hug.

'Thanks for sticking with me' she whispered, 'I'm sorry for all the times I was such a shit and you should have sacked me....'

'It's okay you kept me on my toes,' I told her, 'Just stay in touch and I'll be the first one round for cuddles when little one's born.'

To be fair Kate had been a bit of a bad girl rebel type, sometimes turning up for work bad tempered, stinking of alcohol and cigarettes, and sometimes stoned off her head. She was always being mean to Becky as well to the point where they no longer spoke to each other. I was very close to making her my first sacking. However, I was more about helping people then sacking them, and with help and a lot of faith Kate turned herself around full circle.

I was so proud that she had given herself the kick up the back side that she needed and she'd become a lovely young woman and I was sure that she and John were going to be amazing parents.

As I moved on there was a screech from the tracks below as the train began to move, slowly at first away from the station.

Next was a group of guys sat together, James, Greg, Charlie, and Michael. They were the charmers of the group, cocky and over confident always creeping up to me as the boss (in a nice way) They were all boasting to each other about how much money they were earning. They always greeted me with wolf whistles in some alpha male type joke, which I always played along with. They'd be over complementary to me and I'd hit them back with some witty comeback. It was all a game of harmless flirting and banter.

The clicking of the track beneath my feet became faster as I moved on to the next seat where Irish Sammy and Spanish Sadie were sat. Sammy was a big tall blond girl of about 25 from Belfast who had the loudest voice of anyone I know, while Sadie who came from a small town on the outskirts of Madrid (I will never understand why she moved from the sun to cold wet Norfolk) was a more reserved lady like me.

Sammy was flirting shamelessly with Tom the train conductor who was about 18 and had gone red with embarrassment. Even Sadie was looking distasteful and trying to distance herself from Sammy by talking to Rob who was showing her a picture of his children.

'When you've finished embarrassing the poor boy Sammy' I told her sitting down on the seat opposite, as I did so I sneezed again and sat there wiping my nose as I waited for her to get her act together.

'It's like land of the virgins around here,' Sammy boomed in her Northern Irish accent to nobody in particular, but looking from Tom to me. 'I hope you weren't referring to either of us?' I grinned.

'I was talking about myself, Sadie, and Rachel,' She mocked. 'I'm sure you were' I smiled back with the same sarcasm.

(Sammy was a known man eater, Sadie had a steady boyfriend, and Rachel was the one person in the group under 30, who was happily married).

Sammy stared at me for a second then asked, 'You're not the pretty tight virgin everyone thinks you are, are you?'

'You're right' I told her as I stood up, 'I'm not pretty.' (I wasn't a virgin either but she didn't need to know that)

I moved on next to the last but one table where our two oldest members Jimmy and Susan, who were both in their late 60's, sat opposite Carol.

Becky and Chris sat behind them to my left and to my right Mandy sat at the table opposite Georgie.

Georgie was our good friend who lived in the flat underneath Mandy and I.

People often thought Georgie and I were alike, but there were differences. For example, Georgie was shorter than me and she didn't wear glasses, her hair was a shade darker and a lot shorter than mine, and she was much prettier than I was.

In hindsight, I think they meant our similar personalities, softly spoken yet caring towards others we also shared a very similar sense of humour.

Also like me, Georgie had been through some really tough times, I lost a brother, Georgie however lost most of her family in a tragic accident when she was 19. She lost both her legs and suffered mental health damage in the accident and when we first met her she had been a quiet introvert who didn't work or socialise and lived on disability allowance, which is her right as a disabled person but it was only because other employers she had tried had favoured able bodied people.

In fact, we only met Georgie because she lived in the next flat, we found her trying to climb the stairs with her arms when the lift broke and she'd been out shopping in her wheelchair without her prosthetic legs.

Despite her problems, she had really come out of herself and I'd never seen anyone enjoying their work as much as she did. She was friendly with everyone in the group and we all adored her. I think most of the single guys in the group and even some of the none single ones, would have given anything to be in a relationship with Georgie, but again like me she was happy to bide her time and stay single.

As I reached her I saw that she was knitting a set of baby clothes, which she had told me was for Kate and John's baby. When she saw me, she looked up and flashed a smile.

The train took a lurch to the left and with a heavy bag on my shoulder I was thrown sideways and was expecting my head to smash side on into the seat, when two strong arms grabbed hold of my shoulders and stopped me from falling.

I spun around to see my saviour and was amazed to see that Charlie had got out of his seat several meters away and jumped across James to stop me falling.

'That was impressive Charlie' I told him catching my breath.

'No worries' he said quietly 'It helps that you're a stick insect.'

He gripped my waist and pretended he was going to tickle me before letting go.

'I was actually right behind you' he smiled.

'Well not so impressive then,' I grinned 'But thank you anyway.' 'You're still my superman' I added teasingly.

'So why were you standing behind me Charlie?' I grinned, 'I forgot something.' He said reaching across the table where he picked up two empty cups from a fast food outlet.

'I heard you guys were running late and it's cold and I know you guys can't function without coffee so I got you some.'

'Three other people beat you too it.' Mandy called from behind pointing at 6 cups on the table.

'And it'll be stone cold by now' I smiled trying not to sound patronising.

No shit Sherlock' he winked 'I got them to put it in my Thermos flask.'

'That's good thinking Watson, bonus point' I told him returning the wink. (I have no idea what the winking was for but it's something we do)

'He's good' said Mandy, 'Why didn't you think of that?' she said nudging Becky, whose smile showed me that she'd done exactly the same thing.

They'd both been so thoughtful I couldn't bring myself to tell him that I had the same idea myself.

Then came another of my clumsy embarrassing moments I've become known for over the years. As I was thanking Charlie, that jangling in my nose started up again, I quickly raised my hankie back to my nose and stood there wearing my stupid eyes screwed I'm going to sneeze face for 10 horrifying seconds before sneezing so hard that I lost my balance and fell straight into Charlie who grabbed me in his arms again.

'Bless you mate' He said calmly giving my back a friendly rub. 'Oh, gosh I'm sorry.' I said taking a step back. 'It's okay' he mouthed.

'But I'm all yucky' I told him, swaying slightly as the train sped up and the clicking of the rails under our feet got faster accordingly, as I stood there wiping my nose thoughtfully.

'There's something else' He smiled. 'What is it?' I asked taking a big sniff wondering what else he possibly had up his sleeve. I took the cups and put them on the table next to Georgie, who had heard our conversation and looked up from her knitting in interest to see what else Charlie had got.

He turned back to the table and picked up a lovely bouquet of flowers.

'Wow they're lovely Charlie' I gasped completely stunned at the gesture and in my haste, I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. 'They're for Mandy' he grinned. 'Oh' I said, suddenly feeling a little disappointed that they were not for me as I passed them to Mandy who mouthed a thank you.

They're to stop her getting jealous when she sees I got you these to say sorry for all the rubbish flirting, and thank you for being such a great friend, and to say sorry for whatever I did that's making you avoid me recently.' He smiled awkwardly as he reached to the table behind him and pulled out the biggest bunch of roses I'd ever seen.

I felt my eyes widen and I went bright red, 'Charlie those are amazing' I smiled, 'But I love our rubbish flirting it's the highlight of my day and erm...'

I didn't know how to finish as I put the roses on the table and Charlie passed me his flask of coffee and we stood there awkwardly waiting for each other to speak.

Suddenly I felt Mandy's foot up my bum shoving me towards Charlie giving me all the encouragement I needed to step forward and give him a hug.

'I've been such a useless friend lately I don't deserve you Charlie' I told him.

'I can assure you that every person here knows that's rubbish' he replied putting his arm around my shoulders until I advised that he probably shouldn't get too close.

I was very nervous of people touching my person, Charlie was the only guy in the group who could get away with putting his arm around me because I knew he was just being friendly. We had a lot of history together which I will let him explain further. He was the best friend of my late brother and had been since we were very young.

The long and short of it was we'd been in and out of each other's lives ever since we were kids and I loved working with Charlie so much, this was the 4th Job we'd done together.

I loved the banter we had with each other, although I had been avoiding him since he split with his girlfriend because I was slightly worried that I was starting to develop feelings now he was single and that could only end badly.

.......................................................................

'No offence Jess, but you look like shit girl,' he said awkwardly, 'I hope you are going to bed to rest as soon as you get home.'

Before I could say anything, Mandy interrupted. 'She's taking a boyfriend out in her car.'

'What?' I asked, this was the first I was hearing about me having a boyfriend.

Charlie's face however seemed to drop in surprise.

It was then that Mandy reminded me I had offered to drive Jack home, to out in the sticks near Aylsham. To be honest Charlie was right, I thought to myself as I smothered another sneeze, I was feeling worse by the second and could happily have crawled into bed there and then, but I do not go back on my promises.

'I'll take him if you want to get some rest' Charlie offered kindly, until I reminded him he didn't have a car. 'I could take your mini' he teased knowing how protective I was of my car.

My 1990 pink mini cooper was, and still is my pride and joy and nobody drives that car apart from me.

'You can come with me and make sure I get home okay and you can sleep on our sofa' I told him.

But to my surprise it was Georgie, (who looked as ill as I felt and like me was wiping her nose after a sneeze) who put her hand up and waited patiently as though she was at school and when asked what was up she came out with a question only she would dare to ask.

'Why aren't you two a couple?'

It was the matter of fact way that she said it that caught both of us by surprise.

We both went red with embarrassment but I composed myself enough to answer without laughing.

'Georgie' I grinned although I was really talking to Charlie. 'I don't think Charlie wants to be my boyfriend because if he did he would have asked me out years ago, but I think he just wants a ride in my Mini' I teased.

'I'm sure he'd love a ride on the back seat of your car' Becky chirped in.

The four of us girls all sniggered, which in hindsight was rather mean and out of character for all of us laughing at poor Charlie.

'Jessie wouldn't go out with me, now she's a big important business woman.' he winked.

'Well you don't know until you ask.' I said a little tauntingly.

I was only joking and thought that he would take it as harmless banter even though deep in my heart I kind of wanted him to ask me. This was the reason I was so gobsmacked when after several opportunities to ask me out wasted, he just said.

He looked at me awkwardly and said, 'Would you like to go out tomorrow?'

Unfortunately, I sneezed heavily and shook my head as I was blowing my nose, and think he confused this as me saying no.

I wanted to tell him I would love to go on a date with him, at the same time I felt conflicted, so used my illness as a stalling devise before giving him my true answer.

I told him that I was planning to spend the following day in the warm in front of the TV with a box of tissues.

I was going to invite him to come and keep me company when Mandy, unable to help herself butted in with a cruel joke saying, 'So you two will be doing the same thing tomorrow only Charlie's tissues won't be for his nose.'

Stupidly I couldn't help laughing at the sudden boldness of Mandy's joke, Charlie however did not see the funny side and he turned away before I could grab him and walked away quick march.

I looked a Georgie, Mandy, and Becky to see what they made of it and they were all giving me looks that suggested I should go after him and apologise for upsetting him.

I dropped my bags on the table and jogged with the little breath I had up the train after Charley, I had just skipped around Tom the conductor when Charley turned in surprise. 'Charlie hear me out' I said breathlessly with my cold and my chronic asthma effecting my aerobic fitness.

I hadn't meant to embarrass him at all, I just meant to say we had more to talk about but I said it all wrong and the speed of Mandy's caught me of guard. I didn't want to go out because I really did feel like I was coming down with the flu. I didn't really know a person is supposed to react when somebody who's been a close friend for many years had just got up the courage to ask me out.

First of all, I had to confirm that he wasn't teasing me, then I muddled some plan in my head where I suggested that rather than going out Charlie stayed over when we got home from dropping Jack off. Then tomorrow we could have a duvet day or 2 while I got over this sudden illness with a hot water bottle and Lemsip and order in some pizza and catch up on the soaps I'd been videoing for the past few weeks, (no sky plus in the 90's) while we talked about where we wanted things to go and whether us being together was the right thing after so many years.

However, (in 3rd person) Jessie often does before she thinks and at the wrong time.

When I caught my breath a bit better, rather than talk I talk I just flung my arms around Charley. I'm absolutely sure we were about to kiss, when all of a sudden, we were thrown off our feet with the loudest bang I had ever heard in my life.

Charlie was thrown towards me hard and hit me side on knocking into me like a domino. Despite his best effort to prevent me from falling for a second time, this time he was off balance and I was helpless to avoid taking him down with me as my right elbow and the side of my face collided painfully with the side of the table and everything went black.

Charlie although helpless when it came to falling on me was apologising profusely as I lay on the floor gasping in pain. The train had come to a stop and there were screams from all around us.

After a few seconds a ball of light moved down the train towards us followed shortly by another. As I sat up and adjusted my glasses I saw that the balls of light were Sharon and Amber holding their cigarette lighters so that people could see.

'I knew my chain smoking would come in useful one day' Sharon joked, but suddenly, all laughter had gone from her face as she turned a pale white and she began to scream incoherently. Sammy's high pitch scream joined hers as I struggled up and Charlie put his arm around me and his hand over his mouth as though he was going to vomit.

Warm liquid was spurting out of a dark mass, which lay a few feet behind me into a pool. In the centre of the pool was an oval shaped object and as the light fell upon it I was violently sick.

The warm liquid, which I was covered in was blood,

the dark mass was the body of Tom the conductor and the

oval shape was his disembodied head which had been sliced

clean off as he fell against

Sammy's seat.

Ambers story. Part 1

Hey so I'm not a writer and I'll never claim to be, however after all this time I've come to the conclusion that if this story is ever going to be told it couldn't be complete without my bit, but my best buddies Jess, Mandy, and Georgie and the others, persuaded me that it was okay to write about these things. So, I've finally given in and agreed to put my story forward.

My name on my birth certificate is actually Sophie Spellman. During my teenage years, a particular popular TV program about a teenage witch with my second name, led the school piss takers to calling me Sophie the teenage bitch. So, Amber is a name I fashioned myself in reference to a traffic light system, I am Amber because I don't know if I'm green or red, happy or angry or both.

So today I've joined the others at the pub in Great Yarmouth which my mum and I run together. I chose the venue because even before my mum and I ran it, it's a place where I have often come to chill out and reflect on events. It was me

that persuaded Jess and Mandy to buy the place and breathe some new life

into it and my mum and I run it for them.

I find there is something therapeutic about sitting at the outside tables

and watching the sun rise and fall over the harbour. I used to bring

my husband to that place and cling to him as I remember how lucky

we are to be alive to see another day.

It's true irony that the day of the train crash was the day that I found that place.

I was already having the worst day of my life even before the crash.

I was in a horrible mood despite actually having made £60 in my first

hour at work. The pub was the perfect place for me to take a break.

I ordered a large pot of coffee (enough for at least four people) and took it

outside so I could be alone with my thoughts.

With coffee in one and a cigarette in the other I put my feet up on a chair

and I watched the last rays of sunlight as it touched the choppy water of the

docks. Although I was huddled in my thick coat with the hood up there was something calming about the cold wind on my face and the clanging of boats bobbing on the tide and I wanted to be swallowed up into that moment.

I sat there mulling over in my head the outcome of a consultation

with my doctor that morning. I mentioned the place because it's somewhere

I go when my depression hits me the way it did that night.

It was this same news I was mulling over that had sunk in to me when

Jessica found me at the end of the platform later that night as she has

mentioned already.

By this time though I couldn't stop crying. My hands were shaking so

much that Jessica had to light my cigarette for me which was really kind

considering she doesn't smoke herself (neither do I now) I took a couple of

drags and put it out because it made her cough and need to use her inhaler.

I didn't think Jess even liked me (not many people did) and who would

blame her if she didn't? I could be a horrible little cow when things were

getting to me.

I was in Mandy's half of the group so technically Jess wasn't even my boss.

'What's the matter darlin?' she asked me, putting her arm around my shoulder.

I was shaking so much I couldn't talk but I was so desperate for human contact

that I threw my arms around her and sobbed into her shoulder while she rubbed

my back and whispered in my ear. 'It's okay sweetheart.'

................................................................................................................................................

There were 4 extremes of people I had met over the past weeks.

1, Those who had families who had money, buying big gifts for their

spoilt kids who got everything they asked for at Christmas. That was

the kind of family I came from, apart from being the unwanted child who was lucky if I got anything.

2, The poor families who couldn't afford to spoil their kids but were more grounded family units and more appreciative of what they had. That was the kind

of family I'd rather have had, just like the family of my childhood friend Jack, who always made me feel like one of them.

3, The families on middle income who moaned about it all. Why have a family if you're going to moan about it, when there are people who can't have kids who would gladly take them?

The 4th extreme was where I saw myself, Single lonely people who would give their left arm and probably their right as well to be in the position of any of the above.

I hated it, I hated the whole god damn thing, and to get bad news that day of all days was beyond devastating.

I had always wanted my own family, at 17 years old most people would laugh and say I had many years ahead of me for that. I had promised myself I'd be 100 times better than the woman who treated me like scum compared to my older siblings who treated me the same.

My dad worked for social services so going to them was never going to be any good, and it would later turn out that he was the bad guy in it all.

Every teenager has at some point shouted in a fit of anger 'I wish I was adopted.' I didn't expect my mother to shout back 'You are adopted you ungrateful little bitch.'

So my dad had an inappropriate relationship with a teenage girl in his care and I was the result. I walked out of the house that day and I've never been back.

I had never told anyone this up to this point, I understand the reasons for what that woman I thought was my mother put me through, but I will never forget and I will certainly never forgive.

I set out to right all the wrongs bit by bit, find my real mum who was only a kid herself when she had me. I wanted to find a guy and settle down and get married and all that fairy tale crap. In fact, not just any guy, I wanted to marry my friend Jack. (The trouble was he wasn't even my boyfriend)

Fairy tales don't come true, not when you're 17 years old and not had your first period.

My parents never bothered to question it, and after leaving home at 16 it took me months to get up the courage to see a doctor.

It was the worry over what they might find that made me even more of a spiteful bitch than I had been before.

I tried to remain positive while I waited to see the consultant, I started jogging every day and eating more fruit, even decided to quit smoking. To be fair I hadn't done too badly having not had a cigarette in 2 months, which isn't easy when your flat mate smokes 2 packs a day or more. But I fell off the wagon though that morning when I got some bad news.

The writing was already on the wall but I think I could have taken it better if I'd been diagnosed with one of those horrible diseases that mean you have to spend thousands on IVF treatment.

I was different, basically I'd been kicked and beaten so hard when I was a small child that my ovaries didn't develop properly.

I told myself I was strong and that I could deal with it on my own.

However, what tipped me over the edge was seeing families all at

home together getting ready to celebrate Christmas. Then seeing John

cuddled up to Kate with her huge bump looking like her baby could drop

out at any moment, knowing that would never be me.

Then there was Jack, he was my rock. The two of us had grown up in a s village called Noringsham where Jack still lived. We were 2 of only 6 children

in our primary school year and he was my only friend until I was 11.

Despite our fighting, we were very close and protective of each other and

I think that's why he gave up his place at college to come and work with me.

Speaking from experience it's hard when a boy and girl who grew up so

closely start to see each other differently as adults. It can turn a

lovely friendship into a horrible thing where one poor soul falls in love with

the other but the love is not returned.

Jack made no secret of his feelings for me, I don't know why,

I really wasn't anything to look at in my own opinion and I wasn't even

a nice person really to be around at that time. I could be quite a happy playful young woman but as I say at that time I was often bad tempered and grumpy, yet Jack was never anything but nice to me.

He had asked me out a few times and I'd wanted to say yes but ended up giving him a friendly cuddle and telling him I didn't see him in that way when I did but I didn't want to burden him with my shit.

I was always trying to get him to meet other girls in the hope

that he would meet somebody happy. I think in a way it is the ultimate form

of love because to be honest with myself it was because I actually loved him so much that I wanted him to find a girl who could make him happier

then I could. However, I was hoping that when I got my results back

from the doctor, there would be good news and I could be the nice happy

person I wanted to be, and next time he asked me out I would bite his hand

off and say a million times yes.

But we know how that turned out, that was the last straw, the thing that

tipped me over what I thought was the point of no return.

I hadn't gone to the end of the platform that night to stare into the darkness

and cry, if Jesse hadn't found me I'd be dead now. I would have thrown myself in front of the train and ended my miserable existence there and then and nobody would have remembered nasty little Amber.

In some ways, I feel guilty that I didn't because in hindsight if I had, the only person to die that night would have been me.

....................................................................................................................

So, that's the gist of what was going on in my head and why I was sat

there crying my eyes out and cuddling up to Jessie. She was an angel for

helping me cover up the little episode she didn't need to have done that

because she had enough on her plate and wasn't well either.

I had a cold too, but poor Jessie was coughing her guts up and sneezing into her hankie as we sat there chatting. She had thought I was upset about my awkward relationship with Jack and was telling me about her own experience of young love.

She was telling me that I should forget worries and risk getting my heart broken, because if I didn't I would always regret not knowing, adding that her failure to act on a young love when she was my age was the biggest regret of her life.

However, when I opened up about the whole situation about my lack of ability to have children poor Jessie actually cracked and began to cry herself.

We had been there talking and cuddling so long that the train had already arrived and my opportunity to jump in front of it had gone.

I hid away in the toilet redoing my make up after drying my tears and blowing my nose with a handkerchief Jessie kindly offered me when we were on the platform. However, when I came out I went back into the whole acting like the cocky intimidating bitch that I'd been recently. Jess told me to be rude to her so that people would think she had been telling me off and it would save face from admitting that I just fell apart.

Even Sharon was fooled and she was a good friend, we shared a flat at the time and she tried to be a positive influence on me and wasn't afraid to tell me when I was out of order. She would have made an amazing mother figure if she wasn't just as screwed up as I was.

I hadn't changed my mind, I was just biding my time thinking of other ways to finish myself off.

Something inside changed in me when those lights went out, it was like it turned off a switch inside. When that train came thumping off of the tracks, I forgot about myself just for that moment in time and all I could think about was doing what I could to help the people on that train.

I ran up the train and started handing around the pack of cheap cigarette lighters I'd bought earlier in the day when I fell off the wagon and restarted the filthy habit. Sharon stayed a little further back handing her collection of lighters out and laughing at the people who said she smoked too much.

Jesse was lying on the floor being sick and looking rather dazed as though she'd hit her head. I passed her a lighter. I didn't realise that the stuff sticking to my shoes was blood from that poor young man who lost his head.

Mandy was struggling to bend down to help Georgie who had fallen under the seat. No offence to Mandy but she's not the most agile at her size even with her weight.

Being smaller stature I squeezed passed and got under the table to help Georgie.

Her arm was caught under the seat and she was face down in a warm liquid which seemed to be coffee, she was struggling to breathe as it ran into her mouth. She was rocking from side to side trying to free herself but her stumps where her legs had been were ineffective. I ducked under the table and got her on her side so she could breathe and then I helped her get back on the seat.

I could hear Mandy becoming quite panicked at the other end of the train as they started counting people. I didn't realise why they were getting people off the train, I've always been taught that in the event of an accident you should always

stay with the vehicle even if it's a train. It wasn't until Georgie, who was struggling

to speak grabbed my arm, with Becky sprinting up the train screaming

'What the fuck are you doing faffing about?' that I turned and saw the

end of the carriage engulfed in fire.

Quickly coughing and spluttering in the smoke Becky and I helped

Georgie to get onto the seat and tried to attach her legs but only one would screw in so I carried the other one for her as she hobbled. Jessie was waiting at the door for us while Mandy was organising things from the ground. John,

Rob, Jack and Charlie were helping lift people down.

We helped Georgie to sit on the edge so they could lift her down, but as we did so Becky lost her footing and fell out of the door. Charlie did his best

to try and catch her but she slipped through his grasp and landed with a

sickening crunch and a scream of terrible pain.

Once Georgie was gone I sat on the edge and was lifted down by Jack.

As I felt my feet touch the ground I threw my arms around Jack in gratitude

and kissed him on the cheek. The 2 of us took hold of Georgie from either side

and helped her to hobble away on her crutches.

To my left poor Becky was screaming and crying as John ran with

her away from the train, which was now more than 50% covered in flames. In the

light of the fire I could see Becky's leg hanging limp having clearly been broken

in the fall and blood was seeping not only from her leg but from a wound on her head.

Jessie was refusing to get off of the train saying that there was somebody still there on the train despite Charlie screaming at her to come down.

Seconds after putting Becky down with the rest of the group we saw John running back to check the second carriage to check any other passengers, none

of the rest of us had thought to do so, but Jack and I vowed to go back once we'd helped Georgie.

We were about 50 meters from the train with our backs to it, when suddenly what I think was the fuel tank exploded. It was like being in one of those 3d

action films with metal and glass zooming past our heads.

Moments later we met with the rest of the group in a state of utter panic.

We were in a dark damp field maybe a hundred metres from the train. Some of

the girls were crying in shock, me included, and I'm sure some of the guys were

too if they're honest with themselves.

Georgie gave me a big hug, bless her and thanked me for helping her off the train. Jack and I went over to check on Becky, Sue (who was first aid

trained) had laid her out on the ground with her good leg propped up on a brief case to try and prevent her going into shock. Kate, who rarely even seemed to speak to her twin sister was holding her arm in one hand and supporting her unborn baby with the other as tears rolled down her face.

Mandy came running over to Becky and took her other hand. There was a moment where there was a look of disgust between Kate and Mandy, but they just nodded to each other and concentrated on looking after Becky. At the time, I was confused by it all but I know now what it was all about and it's not my place to say.

I hadn't seen Jessie or Charlie get off the train either, obviously, they did because they lived long enough to write this book, but I was terrified that we had lost them.

Kate, who had been kneeling next to her sister stood up, her eyes searching the shadows for her fiancé. How she must have felt in that moment none of us could have known, the man she adored and the father of her unborn child had gone back to the train and was caught in the explosion. Nobody said a word as she yelled into the darkness 'You get back here RIGHT NOW' She screamed, an echo rebounded across the marsh, then she put her hand on her baby bump and then in a tearful broken desperate voice I heard her whisper. 'Please'.

For a second then nobody could look her in the eye, until she suddenly clutched her stomach and with a blood curdling scream fell to the floor where several people ran to help her.

With there being nothing I could do to help in this situation I was best keeping away. So I took a few steps away and put a cigarette in my mouth and was making my way over to where the other smokers (including Sharon, Sammy, Mike, and Ben) had congregated.

As I wandered over I thought I heard a voice in the darkness say something to me and I spun round but there was nobody there just the wind. I saw Georgie few feet away give me strange look. I thought it would be rude not to offer Georgie one of my cigarettes despite never seeing her smoke. As I thought Georgie turned down my offer and stood looking back at the train with tears in her eyes. I told her rather patronisingly that she was a good girl for not smoking and gave her a quick squeeze, before I turned back towards the other smokers, sparking up my cigarette as I went.

All of a sudden I felt a pair of large hands on my back and before I could scream,

something big had grabbed me from behind.

Georgie's story part 1

Hey, everyone calls me Georgie, it's actually an abbreviation of my middle name Georgina.

My back story is long so I'll tell you bits as I go along. That was one hell of a strange night, I lost a really close friend but found two more, one of whom I was to lose again almost as soon as I had found them.

The group was working the south of Great Yarmouth. My friend and work partner Jim and I were on light walking as were Kate and John due to Kate being so heavily pregnant. Jim was over 70 his health wasn't the best due to his regular trips to the pub and smoking his pipe.

Me on the other hand, I'm missing both legs above the knee and prosthetics in those days weren't so advanced or readily available. I did have 2 prosthetic legs but my stumps are so short that even with modern prosthetics I struggle I still use crutches to walk and probably always will. I prefer to push myself in a wheelchair but unfortunately not everyone has ramps on the front of their houses.

Some people would use 2 missing legs as a reason to sit at home in front of the TV, living off of disability benefits and getting fat. I could have done that myself, but instead my many health problems actually drive me to push myself harder.

I must have made for a rather lonely figure as I limped along the rows of houses huddled against the sea breeze in my thick duffle coat. Jim was way ahead of me due to me having made more sales. I hoped to see him as I came into the next row of houses (We always waited for each other if one was behind.) but he was nowhere to be seen, however I had an inkling where he was when I saw a pub sign.

Jim often popped into the pub for a quick pint around tea time and I would sometimes pop in for a cup of tea to make sure he didn't stay for 3 or 4. I took a look in the window and saw Jim sat at the bar with two of our colleagues Sammy and Sadie. They all sat there with their drinks half-drunk, Jim sucking on his pipe while Sammy was slumped across the bar trying to light her cigarette while Sadie just looked bored.

I toyed with the idea of going in to join them but the place was full of smoke, something that I really don't get on well with, so before any of them saw me I crept past and went on to the next house. This was a decision that would change the course of the night and possibly my whole future.

The houses beyond the pub all had small front gardens with wooden gates and paving slab paths leading up to the front doors. There were no sales to be had in the first 3 or 4 houses. I was met with a polite no, and a not so polite go away and a no answer. I sat on the garden wall of the 3rd house and took a quick drink and blew my nose before I went on to the 4th house.

I was unsure if I should knock, there were no lights on in the front of the house and there was an unkempt feel to the place but it looked like there was a light on in the back so it was worth a try. I hobbled up to the door and stood with my innocent smile on my face leaned on my left crutch and raised my right hand to knock when the door suddenly flung open.

I stood there like a bit of a lemon with my hand in the air where the door knocker had been and my crutch hanging from my right elbow as I leaned on my left.

In the dim light of the door way stood a rather frail looking old lady with a walking stick, she reminded me a little of the crazy cat lady from the Simpson's.

'Hello dear.' She smiled kindly. 'Hi I'm Georgie,' I said trying my best to twist the look of shock on my face back into something that looked a little friendlier as I reached out and offered her my hand.

'Ronda Fish' she said taking my hand and giving it a limp shake. It was clear as my eyes adjusted to the light that she was a lot older than the 50 age limit of the health insurance I was selling. However, it was unkind not to at least ask her and be shocked when she told me how old she was and pretend I thought she was 30.

'Well are you going to come in and tell me what your selling.' She asked turning back into the house as if she was sure I was going to follow.

'Mrs Fish!' I protested following, 'I just need to tell you that I can only sell to people between 16 and 50.' She turned and smiled, 'My granddaughters are 30, something they might be interested in. 'Okay' I smiled nervously closing the door.

It wasn't unheard of for someone to open the door before I knocked, because often people could see or hear you coming, but for someone to invite you in before you had even explained why you were there, now that's just strange.

Even through my blocked nose I could smell the damp mustiness of the house. The hallway (which was poorly lit with original energy saving light bulbs) took us past a rickety wooden stair case and a small kitchen before opening out into a living room.

The living room was best described as cosy, it was not small but rather crowded with an old 3-piece suite and a long dining table. Some might say the room was dirty and unkempt, but I prefer to say that it had an old tired and well used charm to it. The wall paper had clearly been there since the 60's and the carpets and furnishings despite being old and worn down were clean and tidy.

'I love your house Mrs Fish.' I said quietly as I took a second look around the room. (I wasn't trying to charm her, I genuinely loved its homely feel.)

She turned and looked at me as if she had only just noticed that I was there.

'You sit down dear' she told me rather sharply pointing at a sofa at the centre of the 3-piece suite. 'You girls have fun while I go and make us all a nice cup of tea.'

'Thank you.' I replied nervously placing my crutches down against the chair and looking around the room to see who she had been referring to when she said, 'You girls.'

I suddenly realised that in my quick gaze around the room I had missed a young girl who was sat at the table eating a large plate of sausage and mash and watching neighbours on a large old TV.

'Hi I'm Jenny.' she smiled.

'Be nice to our guest Lizzy' Mrs Fish told her rather sternly. I was a little confused but the girl calmly replied, 'I'm not Lizzy Nanna.'

'Sorry Alice.' Mrs Fish told her off handily returning down the hall towards the kitchen.

'I'm Jenny' the girl said again through closed teeth pointing at a seat opposite her at the table.

Nervously I took a seat opposite her. To give an accurate description Jenny looked about 12, was round faced with dirty blonde hair and she was a little on the chubby side. (It would have been rude to call her fat because that was inaccurate) Her eyes, which were looking right at me were so wide that they looked like they were going to pop out of her head.

'So' she said in a quite hard gravelly tone as I sat down. 'You're a sales person.'

'Yes I am' I replied softly.

She stared at me piercingly with those big brown eyes. 'Sorry for wasting your time' she sniffed 'Mums gone out and Nanna forgot.'

'I see' I said smiling.

'You saw the state of my Nanna's mind' She said without taking her gaze from me, which rather intimidated me if I'm honest because there's one thing I'm not, it's a confrontational person.

It had been quite clear to me from the off that Mrs Fish was not of sound mind and as I say I could see she was outside the age range for the policy I was selling.

I nodded and grinned awkwardly.

'You're not going to rip her off by selling her anything she doesn't need' she continued in her gravelly voice, almost as though she was threatening me not to take advantage of her grandmother's mental state.

To be fair if I had a grandmother in that state of health I would have been just as defensive, but still I tried to hold my ground and defuse any confrontation that might be had.

'Please don't think that I would do something like that' I replied shaking my head without breaking eye contact.

Jenny sat back and held her hands up apologetically holding up her knife and fork with a large piece of sausage on the fork, then she turned away and coughed as if to clear her throat.

'I'm sorry Georgie I didn't mean it nastily' She smiled, speaking in a much softer less gravelly voice. She laughed saying her cold and sore throat were making her sound like a gangster.

'Well that's okay then.' I breathed.

She put the sausage in her mouth and started to chew before deciding she had not said everything she wanted and raised her hand swallowing the sausage before it was fully chewed and causing herself to choke a little.

'I meant it as an observational statement' she said after a deep breath. 'Meaning exactly what you said, that you wouldn't do that because you're a nice person.'

'It's okay to be wary' I told her, 'You don't know me, I could be anyone' I sniffed.

For the first time, she looked away from me and towards the TV in the corner 'Did you notice that I know your name even though I haven't let you introduce yourself' She said darkly. I stopped and thought back over our conversation, she had used my name but probably she just heard me introduce myself to her grandmother.

'I didn't hear you say it to Nanna cos I know that's what you're thinking, I know you better than you think' she told me with an uneasy smile.

'Have we met before?' I asked her quietly. She frowned slightly and shook her head

As she did so I sneezed twice possibly 3 times into my hankie.

'Bless you!' Jenny said looking down the hallway at the kitchen door where her grandmother had gone.

'I'm really sorry if I pass you my cold' I told her feeling very embarrassed as I gave my nose a good blow.

'No worries' she said with a deep sniff 'I'm already full of it.' She smiled awkwardly looking a bit distracted.

She stood up suddenly leaving her dinner on the table 'Come and sit on the sofa' She told me, with a sudden enthusiasm. I struggled up and hobbled after her and sat on the sofa at the centre of the ageing 3-piece suite.

Jenny sat opposite me looking anxiously over her shoulder. 'Are you okay?' I asked.

'Oh yeah.' she replied brightly 'I just want to show you something and I would rather Nanna didn't see even if she is gone in the head.'

I was intrigued what could a girl I'd barely met want to show me that was so secret that her Nanna had to be out of the way.

She bent forward and took a tissue from a box on a nearby coffee table and blew her nose loudly. Then she put the tissue in the bin and took both my hands in hers and leaned forward and looked me dead in the eyes.

'Your name is really Mary Georgina Aricot' She smiled.

My jaw dropped, suddenly I was numb with shock, what the hell was going on? Nobody and I mean nobody knew my real name not even Jesse and Mandy, just me.

'That was what I wanted to show you.' she said quietly.

'You're a psychic?' I replied in an inquisitive state of shock.

'That is one way of putting it' She replied softly with a backward glance to the kitchen where her nanna was still making tea.

'That's a really cool power to have' I whispered. I was a little surprised when she shook her head.

'It's only one of the things I can do, in some ways I'd rather just be a normal teenager.' she sighed shaking her head. 'My dad left us because I'm a freak and my family want to hide my powers from the world in case people try to take advantage. They don't even let me go to school.'

'You're not a freak' I said softly knowing just what it's like to be shut away in the darkness away from humanity albeit self-inflicted in my case.

'You didn't think that five minutes ago' she smiled. 'True.' I nodded. 'but you have got me intrigued now.

She looked down at her knees and shook her head slowly and when she looked up her eyes seemed to widen even more if that was possible as she practically beamed at me.

'Believe me' she said softly 'You have me equally intrigued.'

'I bet if I squeeze your hands a little I can find out more about you then you know yourself.' she said with a grin taking a tighter grip on my hands. 'Go for it' I told her softly.

'You really are special' she smiled. 'How am I special?' I asked.

'Well,' She said 'For one I felt your life force coming from 17 streets away, and I got Nanna to answer the door when you got close.'

'Really............' She nodded 'You don't need to work, and yet you do it for the friendship and the experience of meeting new people rather than for the money.'

It was my turn to nod as she continued 'Although you work six days a week you also spend Sundays working in a soup kitchen for the homeless.' True again I told her. 'Told you' she said with a rather twisted grin that looked somewhat like an evil smile. 'I know your deepest and darkest secrets now.'

'You know my big secret then?'

'I do' she said softly putting her finger to her lips as if to indicate she wasn't going to do anything.

'And you don't think I'm mad.' I smiled weakly.

Then there was a moment where both of us looked at each other without saying a word, and then suddenly her face dropped it was then I knew her powers were real.

There was sadness in her eyes that told me she knew about the pain I'd been hiding from everyone. 'You poor lady' she choked wiping her eye with her sleeve and taking a deep breath. '3 years and you don't remember anything before your accident.'

I shook my head slowly and thought to myself how just for that moment I wished I had just walked on to the next house and would never have met Jenny and her powers however sweet and kind-hearted her intentions were.

I think I'd better explain that her powers were spot on. Despite being born in 1977, my life as I know it started when I woke up from a coma in a Swiss hospital in 1996.

They told me I'd been on a skiing holiday when my family were involved in a horrific car accident.

It's not visible when you look at me, but I hit my head so hard that I cracked my skull and woke up two months later in a head brace and my legs were obviously too bad to save.

My mother, father, brother and sister all died in the crash leaving me alone at barely nineteen years old. That's bad enough on its own, but I didn't remember anything about my life before that day, and no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't remember anyone or anything including my family, and worst of all I was driving the car they died in.

After months of rehab, I moved from our family home to my flat in Norwich, and I took the pictures of my family and I from the walls and put them up in my little bedroom to try to jog my memory. Still, to me they were just dead people staring out of the past even the ones of me.

Because I didn't remember them, I didn't care so much about them, and I couldn't cry for them which made me hate myself even more.

I stared down at the floor wondering if I should pick up my crutches and hop out of the door and get out of there before I got too upset. On the other hand, Jenny's powers however madly impossible it seemed may be the only way I could ever find out enough about my family to make my peace. Although why should I have any right to use her powers for my knowledge?

However, when I looked back, Mrs Fish stood beside the table with a tray full of cups and a teapot. Jenny gave me an apologetic look and removed her hands from mine.

For some reason known only to her, Mrs Fish brought enough cups for five people and poured the tea for 2 of us as though she had forgotten or just ignored poor Jenny. Jenny poured her drink and went back to finish her sausages. Mrs Fish rambled on about the old days seeming to think I was an old friend of hers.

As I sat on the sofa sipping tea and agreeing with everything the sweet old lady said, I felt my cold going downhill all of a sudden. I must have sneezed six or seven times which embarrassed me a lot as it is not the done thing to go into someone's house and spread your germs, but each time Mrs Fish just touched my arm and said bless you, my dear. I wasn't the only one as poor Jenny sat at the table sneezing badly too. It was almost as if there was something in the air that we were both allergic to.

Mrs Fish seemed to have forgotten about Jenny, but Jenny barely took her eyes off of me the whole time she sat at the table. I didn't know if it was because she was checking that I wasn't dying of boredom or if she was trying to read deeper into my mind as I sat there intently listening to poor Mrs Fish. She kept repeating herself about her days as a fish wife on Yarmouth sea front.

Her tales would have interested me greatly if I could get my mind away from my insight I had into Jenny's powers and the possibility that her extraordinary talent could help me fill in the missing gaps in my life if she would be kind enough.

After finishing the second cup of tea, I was running short on time and thinking I may well need the toilet. I hoped that if I made my excuses to leave I might have one more chance to speak to Jenny before I went.

It was Jenny however who brought a controlled end to proceedings. 'Come on Nanna.' she smiled 'I think Georgie has other people's stories to hear.' I stayed silent as Mrs Fish snapped suddenly at Jenny.

'It's rude to interrupt when the adults are talking Erica.'

'IT'S JENNY' she said a little louder.

Mrs Fish seemed to snap back into herself for a moment finally looking at Jenny 'When did you get here Jenny?' She smiled looking slightly confused 'and who's your friend?'

'I'm Georgie' I reminded her, and she smiled 'Would you girls like a nice cup of tea?'

'We were just going out Nanna.' Jenny told her walking over and taking another tissue from the box on the table and wiped her nose; she nodded towards the door gesturing that

it was time for me to go.

She kindly passed me my crutches and offered to help me up and followed me down the long dark corridor to the front door, where she turned on a small light and grabbed my arm to stop me leaving.

'Thank you for letting me read you.' She whispered 'I am sorry we didn't have time to go deeper.' 'It's been a pleasure to meet you both' I told her.

She put a piece of paper in my hand. 'It's our phone number.' She whispered 'so you can call me if you want to meet up and try again because it would be my pleasure to help you,'

'That's so kind' I told her 'of course I would love to!' I meant it sincerely rather than when I say it to all the sleazy guys who gave me their numbers.

As I reached for the door handle, she grabbed my arm and spoke in a more urgent whisper.

'You're getting the train home tonight.' I nodded, 'I don't know exactly what's going on but there's a ritual going on to celebrate the winter solstice out on the marshes, my mum's there, I'm too young, it's all innocent but....' She paused

'But what sweetheart?' I asked concerned, 'I have a feeling that there are bad people too and I don't want you or any of your friends to get caught in it.'

'I'm sure we'll be fine darling'' I reassured her as I stepped out the door, 'I promise I'll phone you.' Jimmy was ambling down the street, he saw me and started to walk up the path to meet me, but Jenny grabbed my arm again.

'The spirits have a message for you.' She gasped suddenly, 'When the worlds clash you shall meet your grace and the key to your survival is the colour amber.'

Before I could ask what she meant Jimmy had reached us, and Jenny was seemingly spooked 'I'll see you soon' she said hurriedly shutting the door behind me.

'Thought you got lost' Jimmy smiled 'You know me Jim' I grinned uneasily going into the darkness with Jenny's message still processing in my mind. 'Make friends not money.'

'You make enough of both.' I couldn't see his face, but I could feel him smiling as he said it.

He always told me that I was to him like the daughter or granddaughter he and his deceased wife never got the chance to have. Just as he was to me like the dad or granddad I didn't remember ever having.

If I'd any idea that this would be the last time we walk the streets together I would have told him more often.

I didn't tell anyone about Jennie and her Nanna because I didn't know what to think myself, in fact, it quite scared me.

I didn't want anyone to know about Mary Aricot, the person I was before I was me is not somebody who's hand I would like to shake.

Mary Aricot was the rude, snobby, upper-class daughter of a billionaire businessman and she treated people like shit. The person I was before I woke up in that hospital

If people knew who I was, they might have wanted to be friends for all the wrong reasons. Aricot international was started by my great-grandfather and now had hotels in every major city and seaside town in the western world. As the only surviving heir it all went to me. I lied when I said I had claimed disability benefits but I didn't want the business or the money because I didn't earn in it. It was dirty power and money acquired by killing my family, however accidental it was. I had put the business in the hands of a CEO and tried to forget about it, I lived off of the interest earned on my inheritance and gave what I didn't need to charity and did the same with all my wages.

Enough about that.

Jenny knew that secret, and she got everything else right, so when worlds collide? Did that mean heaven and earth colliding at my death? And my Grace? Did that mean God? I wasn't even sure I believed in God, in fact I had been sure I didn't until about an hour ago. The key to my survival is Amber, now that made me wonder if I was going to be locked in a sell with different coloured keys.

I'm glad I kept it to myself because my guesses were all wrong and my life was about to change again.

.....................................................................................................................

I remember watching with interest on the train as Charlie passed the flowers to Jessie and thinking why on earth weren't the 2 of them together. They just seemed to me like they should be a couple. She was always inviting him over for dinner or drinks or going to the cinema, but it was all because they were old friends.

Forgive me if I was a bit out of touch, but I didn't get Mandy's joke about them both watching movies with a box of tissues. However, I do now, and I feel sick at the thought of it.

However, that's not the point; I was looking back up the train as Jess went after him and I was thinking to go, girl, you go and get your man and tell him how you really feel.

Suddenly everything went dark. The brakes were screaming, and with my prosthetic legs lying on the seat next to me I had no way of balancing myself and fell backwards onto the seat and slid under the table.

I lay on the floor with my arms flapping trying to get up, but I was slipping and sliding in the cold coffee which had poured all over the floor from several extra cups that were bought for Jessie and Mandy. Soaking wet face down and choking I actually thought I was going to die.

I have to say if I was going to die, this was not the way I imagined it, I am not a coffee drinker so if I had to drown in a beverage I would have preferred tea or sweet, warm hot chocolate.

Thankfully just as I thought I was going to die, my unlikely saviour and hero Amber climbed under and freed me.

One of my legs screwed on easily while the other didn't want to attach thankful to Jack, Amber, Becky and whoever else helped.

There was crying and screaming everywhere after the blast that blew the windows out of the train. Becky was on the floor with a broken leg, and next to her Kate was screaming for John who had been running back to the train to help the others as we passed.

For all I knew Jessie was still on the train and so was Jimmy and maybe even John too. Jack seemed to have run back to help as Amber stood there shaking and I thanked her for saving me. She just smiled awkwardly, breathlessly saying. 'I need a fag do you want one?' None of us was thinking straight if we were Amber would have remembered I don't smoke and that she had my prosthetic leg under her arm. Still in shock, I forgot to ask for it back, and I shook my head. She called me a good girl as she turned to join the other smokers who were now all lighting up.

I had just seen her light up when something grabbed her from behind so quickly that neither of us could scream.

Without a moment to lose and with only my one false leg and my crutches on the soft wet ground in the dark. I was following the glow of Ambers cigarette as it faded quickly, without a clue as to what in existence could have taken a full-grown woman out of thin air and carried her into the darkness.

After many moments stumbling after her in the darkness looking blindly for the light of her cigarette I realised I was not going to catch her. However, when I turned back towards the train for help, it was nowhere to be seen. Shouting and feeling my way through the darkness out of nowhere somebody ran into me with such a force that I was knocked to the ground and everything went black.

Charlie's story

There were many places I could have been that night when the train came off the rails, but in a rather morbid way given the other choices, I wouldn't have changed a thing.

If I hadn't been there at work that night the alternative for me would have been to sit at home watching TV on an empty sofa, before lying in a cold, empty bed which I used to share with my girlfriend of 2 years until she inexplicably left me.

I think in some twisted way we were all fated to be on that train. When I look back and go over things, I see a pattern which suggests my whole life had been somehow manipulated towards me being there. In truth fate always seemed to bring me back to Jessica and she was my cast iron reason for being there.

Admittedly my reputation as a charmer, and the fact that I bought her flowers might have seemed to the others as though I was either being a plain suck up to the boss or that I chose a terrible time to ask her out.

However, the real reason that I bought her the flowers was that I'd seen her struggling over the past few days and wanted to do something to show my appreciation for her hard work and friendship.

To be clear even though I cared really deeply for her, I had no intention of asking her out until she invited me and even then, I just thought it was banter amongst friends, and when I walked off I didn't think she was saying no, I was just going back to my seat so she didn't have to think of an answer.

My insistence on going with her to take Jack home wasn't me trying to hit on her, I was genuinely concerned about my friend. She and Mandy had run themselves into the ground for that business, in the last couple of years they walked miles and miles and got little sleep.

Mandy was looking tired, but better for the extra exercise having lost a lot of weight. Jessie however, was always a slim and very fit girl who loved her swimming, but despite her eating well she was looking drained from all the extra walking (Jess and Mandy being in charge had to do more walking than the rest of us). She still had that mischievous spark in her eyes, but the bags around them concerned me, and she was looking very ill.

Somehow Jess and I had always been close in one way or another. I had known her since she was about 3, we grew up on the same street in Mile Cross, and she was the little sister of my best mate Dave.

Their mother was a child minder and after my own mum passed away, my old man god rest his soul would send me to their house after school so that he could continue working.

Dave and I would often hang out with a boy called Johnny whose parents adopted Mandy, and as we got a little older, we used to play out in the streets in the summer with a lot of other kids.

It was the 80s and parents were not paranoid about their children, like nowadays and with no kid's TV channel or IPads, internet or that crap we stayed out until the street lamps came on playing in the park.

Dave and Johnny might have moaned about their sisters, but I found their presence very welcome, Mandy is just a huge laugh (in size and personality), and Jessie especially was an intelligent, engaging girl.

Jessie had five brothers, but she clung to Dave because he was closest in age, but he didn't want her as much as she wanted him so sometimes he'd ask me to keep an eye on her, I am sure he didn't mean until she was 23.

In fact, I have fond memories of helping Jess learn to swim one summer in the fenced-off stretch of river at Wensum park where most of the poor kids in Norwich went.

Of course, things changed as the 80's came to a close I finished with school and started work with my old man at the sweet factory and Dave became a mechanics apprentice.

Time for socialising was limited to me Dave and a few other guys going for a drink in whichever of the local watering holes didn't care that we were underage.

Jessie would always answer the door when I called round for Dave, and if he wasn't home yet, she would always invite me in for a cup of tea and catch up.

The long and the short of it to avoid retelling every detail of the following nine years.

Jessie and Mandy got jobs in the sweet factory with me (That's how Mandy got fat because she ate a lot of the produce)

I think the problem was that there was always the underlying connection between Jessie and I. However, there is an unwritten rule between friends that you don't ask out your best friend's little sister out if you want to remain friends. Despite this, we had all remained a very tight group of friends, and we'd all go out drinking down the local pub after work.

That was until Jess fell out with her parents and moved to another part of the city with her much older brother Chris while she looked for her own place.

However, Jess, Mandy, myself and my old man were all laid off with the early part of 1994 and with the loss of 900 jobs which would devastate the city for many years to come. I was lucky enough to get a job at Norwich union insurance.

I had been there a couple of weeks when I was sat at my desk having just got off the phone at the call centre one morning when someone put their hands over my eyes and whispered in my ear. 'Guess who, Charlie.'

I couldn't forget that voice, Jessie had got herself job as a general office body, tea making photocopying that sort of thing.

We'd often have lunch together.

We worked there a good 3 and a half years in which time we got that horrible news that Dave and his girlfriend had been killed in a motorcycle accident. Maybe it was just because she was at my house having tea with my dad and I when we got the call, or because she was fighting her parents and didn't go to them. It was me who sat there in shock cuddling her all night, and my shoulder she cried on at the funeral ignoring her parents altogether.

My friendship with Jessie remained strong but by the time I was 21, and she was 19 I began to realise that our close friendship wasn't going to blossom into anything else. That was when I started seeing a girl, Joanne or Smokey Jo as we called her. The only downside to Smokey Jo was the reason for her nickname, she could rarely be found without a cigarette on the go, and I don't smoke, but despite this, I thought Jo was the love for me.

Jo, Jessie, and Mandy were all in the same year at school and all friends, so all was well for a few years apart from my dear old man, who never got over the loss of my mum, died from drinking and smoking-related problems. Then again Jessie and I were given a few months' notice our jobs were being cut. Then within a few days, she was gone from work, and although I saw her socially, she kept tight-lipped about what she was doing for employment until she called me one day knowing my job was coming to an end and had told me about her new business venture.

That was when I started working for J&M; I watched proudly as my friend's, business went from strength to strength. I was happy at work, and at home, I was earning good money, had friends and a charming girlfriend who I was planning to marry.

Then I came home one night to find Jo stood outside the front door with a rucksack. Before I could ask what she was doing, she kissed me and told me she loved me. Then she put something in my hand swung her rucksack onto her back and left smoking a cigarette and didn't even look back when I called. The thing she put in my hand was a note which read.

'I love you, and that's why I want to set you free, give it to the girl your heart needs, you'll find her right in front of your face, with love Joanne xxx

Wrapped in the note was the engagement ring I gave her on her birthday.

I drank an entire bottle of vodka and fell asleep on the living room floor. I woke up hours later in my bed with a coffee cup being slammed down on the table and the curtains being and Jessie in my bedroom telling me 'Wake up Charlie it's a new day. Time for work we need our best people on the ball.' It was her way of helping me not to dwell on pain of the shock break up of what I thought was going to be my future.

When Jess tells people, she was a rubbish friend that's crap, for a month she would call me before and after work every day to make sure I was okay. She also arranged a work bonding trip to Alton towers which she later admitted was partly to get me out socialising.

Anyway, skipping back to that night, I had not been looking forward to spending Christmas on my own, but things were looking up. I was learning to laugh again, and that was what I was doing with Jess, but the flowers were because I wanted to say thank you for everything. Jess got a bigger bunch of flowers; I thought she would appreciate them more and look after them better.

As she has said though, the flowers were also to apologise for whatever it was that I'd done to make Jessie avoid me in recent weeks. However, Jess has already given her reasons as to why that was, and she has been forgiven.

What happened in the moments before the train stopped was a bit of banter, but I got a bit uncomfortable when they joked about me wanting to ride on Jess in the back of her car.

However, it wasn't really until Georgie said what she did that I realised that sometimes you couldn't see what's right in front of you. I just didn't know what to do when Jess prompted me to ask her out, and I didn't know if she was teasing me. Mandy's joke, however crude was not really on my mind I left because I didn't know how to react.

When I heard Jessie calling, and saw her stood there panting after chasing me down, I heard Jo's words from her note ringing in my ears, and it all became clear. 'Give it to the girl your heart needs; you'll find her right in front of your face.' Jessie had been walking with me past my house on her way home that night, and it was her who stood there in front of me when I looked up from the note.

When I saw Jess coming towards me with her arms open, I realised it always had been her. All those summers and weekends hanging out in the park, and in the pub when we got older. I wasn't hanging out with her because she was with her brother. I was hanging out with Dave because he was hanging out with her. How stupid had I been all those years ago with all the noble not dating my best friend's sister crap? If I asked her out all those years ago, I wouldn't have been dating my best friend's sister, because Jessie was my best friend.

Just when I thought we were actually going to kiss, everything went to hell.

.................................................................................................................

After the bump, I fell flat over on Jessie, she was my priority she was hurt but not severely but when we saw Tom's body in front of us both of us were sick everywhere. The only time I'd ever seen a dead person was my old man in a hospital bed. My old man drank too much but Tom was a young guy with his whole life ahead of him, Jessie was screaming as his blood poured over us and his head lay there looking up at us in the dark.

Jessie was soon up and helping organise the evacuation of the train. It went by in a haze; I remember forcing the door and helping people off the train. I was lifting them down, and I think Kate was off first because she was pregnant, and I might be wrong, but I remember Georgie only managed to put on one of her prosthetic legs on.

I will never forgive myself for letting Becky fall when she slipped, I just couldn't catch her, and the sound of her leg breaking as it hit the ground is something I never want to hear again.

I don't remember who dragged her free, but I was worried. Jessie was still on the train stood in the doorway looking down the row at the flames calling for somebody who seemed to be still on the train. As I looked along the train, I saw somebody jump from the door on the far side covered in flames and roll onto the floor.

I am certainly not an expert on train fires and not planning on becoming one anytime soon but I am pretty sure diesel can explode at the right temperature.

'Jessie get out of there' I called, but she was still looking into the flames thinking there was somebody as she coughed and wheezed.

I'd never in my life shouted at a woman, but needs must on these occasions when she was not going to listen. So I braved the heat and reached up grabbing both her ankles and yelled at the top of my voice, 'Jessica Louise Reynolds get your stubborn backside off that fucking train before you get us both killed.'

She turned to me with a sudden look of shock as she saw the flames, then she caught me off guard and jumped into my arms. Now I might be a big strong bloke and Jessie might be very skinny but she's a tall, lanky girl bless her, and in catching her off balance she knocked me over backwards with a thud onto the grass. In a second she was already apologising and pulling at me to get up, and we grabbed each other's hands and started after the others who had got a safe distance away already.

It was just like in the movies; we had run about three steps when there was a deafening bang and feeling of lightness as we realised that the blast had thrown us off of our feet into the air. We came crashing back to earth face down with a bump, and I heard Jessie moan in pain.

For a few minutes, we just laid there in shock saying nothing. After a while had passed, we sat up in the darkness. I felt Jessie grab me and she put her arms around me breathing hard and crying with shock as I sat there in silence rubbing her back.

'We have to go back' she cried, 'No we've got him' I heard Mandy breathing in a panicked voice. 'Is everyone else okay?' Jessie and I both asked at once.

'No' She panicked breathlessly 'Becky has an open fracture, she needs an ambulance like yesterday and Kate's just gone into labour, and Jimmy caught fire, and he's very badly burnt.'

I heard Jess swear under her breath.

'There's more' Mandy breathed 'did you see John, Georgie, Jack, and Amber yet. 'Yes,' we both shouted at once. 'They're all missing.' She breathed hard.

At this point, Jessie stopped crying and found her voice; she was softly spoken as always, so Mandy used her booming voice to relay her instructions as the remaining staff members congregated in the light from the burning train.

Jessie seemed really short of breath as though her asthma was beginning to kick off and a few times she turned and sneezed heavily but carried on talking to the group. Something I became aware of is that she had not looked at me once, however her left arm was tightly squeezed around me, and she would not let go. I tried to help her as Mandy communicated to the rest of the group as to what we were doing but I was struggling myself.

I began to realise that strangely it wasn't just Jessie who looked and sounded like she had the flu. Somehow all of the ladies in the group were looking unwell in the low light, and several of them were coughing and sneezing. Even loud mouth Mandy was struggling to shout orders through her blocked nose until I gave her my pocket square from my top pocket of my ruined blazer and told her not to give it back.

It was decided that retired nurse Sue was the oldest and should stay with the three casualties. The remaining 14 of us split into two groups of 3 and two groups of 4. Groups headed by Jessie and Mandy would set off up the tracks in different directions to get help at which ever station was nearest, while two more teams of 4 searched either side of the tracks.

My hand went straight up to volunteer to lead the group to head south towards the river, but Jessie yanked my hand down and picked Sharon with Rob, Greg, and Michael, then Mandy picked Chris, Ben, Cathy and Rachel.

Mandy, who was a short round lady then stood up to Sammy who was the tallest woman I have ever seen and took a deep sniff and said loudly and angrily in front the whole group so everyone could hear. 'Sammy your drunk stay in front of me, and we will be discussing your employment if we get back alive.'

At this point Sharon raised her hand quietly and said 'I am a bit drunk too am I fired.' Mandy didn't hear her however and I calmly suggested that she put down the wine bottle in her hand, and keep quiet.

Jessie however, tapped Mandy on the shoulder and shook her head whispered something about Sammy to Mandy who nodded, and her tone softened.

I didn't ask her to tell me what she said, but we all had our suspicions about what was in Sammy's drink bottle. Jess turned and quietly breathed into my ear that she was aware that Sammy was an Alcoholic and that she had talked to Sammy who had agreed to go with her to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting the following Tuesday.

She had just reminded Mandy that we help our friends when they have problems and sacking her would be no use to anyone.

The only problem with the plan was a young man called Greg who hadn't been with us long, and he quite loudly opposed the plan to search for people and said we should all sit and wait for the emergency services. 'And what do you propose we do about searching for our friends' Mandy shrieked, 'They're probably in the pub that's where I'd be' he retorted. There was an angered response to his reply with people booing.

It was Kate who was lying on a coat propped up on a pile of briefcases holding her sister Becky's hand, who spoke next yelling breathlessly.

'My sister has a badly a broken leg and could die from blood loss; my waters have just broken, the baby's coming, my fiancé is missing and could be lying dead out there in the dark, how dare you accuse him of being in the pub you little gob shite.'

His reply sparked outrage as he said, 'I'd be in the pub if I were him.' I felt Jessie grip my hand in anger.

It was Mandy who shouted for calm, and when she got it, she said firmly. 'I will give one thousand pounds to the first one to punch Gregory.'

Several people stood forward, and there was laughter as the little weasel squealed and apologised to Kate, who quite rightly refused to accept it.

So, without a minute to lose, we left in our own directions with Spanish Sadie joining Mandy. That left myself and James to join Jessie who still had her head away from me and her hood covering her face.

We had taken off our winter coats and given them to Becky and Kate, and we found some other kind people had already soaked their coats in a puddle and laid them on poor old Jimmy who looked horrible. I hated to say it, but he didn't look long for this world.

Sue had tied every bandage in the team first aid kit around Becky's right leg, which she had propped on a case. By the look of her injury, she had a double open fracture above and below her knee; she was in so much pain she couldn't talk. I wasn't the biggest fan of her fashion, but she was a sweet girl. I felt awful that from my inability to catch her, she would be lucky if the injury didn't put pay to her ambition of playing rugby for England ladies. Furthermore, I realised if we didn't get help ASAP she could lose her leg like Georgie or worse she my well bleed out and die. Kate was already screaming as though her baby was coming and I saw Becky reach out and hold her sister's hand.

After very a quick stop we walked up to the track past the burning train, looking around shouting the names of our friends to no avail. We turned right and headed east along the line back towards Yarmouth.

I was wearing my head light; it was the only light we had as we decided to save our torches which we all carried as a company policy.

Jessie was holding me tight around my waist, and even James grabbed my other arm, so we all knew where each other were. James and I were shouting the names of our friends, but Jessie had pulled her woolly hat down and tied her scarf around her mouth, her head was bent towards the floor and her face was buried in one of her extra-large handkerchiefs, and she breathed hard.

When I asked her if she was okay she shook her head and sobbed, and that was when I realised she was not just covering her face to avoid sneezing on me, but she had started to cry again and was hiding it. I didn't know what to say I just let her cuddle into me as we walked.

After a few minutes, something was bugging me, and I decided to come out with it and ask Jessie straight out why she pulled my hand down when I volunteered to lead the group that was going towards the river. I asked if she didn't trust me with leading.

She didn't answer immediately, and I thought she was ignoring the question,

then I heard her blowing her nose so she could speak.

She spoke in a quiet, muffled voice behind her handkerchief saying, 'I trust

you with my life Charlie and I did choose you to lead.' Then she turned her

head to me and removed the handkerchief saying 'I chose you to lead this group.'

When the light hit her, I jumped back in shock, the girl with her arm tightly around me with cuts on her face was not Jessica.

Mandy 1

I don't like to beat around the bush. Obviously, my name is Mandy Brown, joint owner of JAM enterprises; my best friend Jess is the real brains behind the business. She was the Simon, and I was the Garfunkel, she was the brains, and I was the voice.

Between Jessie and I we were earning a lot of money at the time charging commission on sales made by our staff, Jess was not in the business for money, but I was, or at least to start with it was all I cared about, but once I got to know people more I came to care about the staff too.

To look at I was short and fat with red hair that went down to my chin. When the train crashed, and our friends were missing, I went towards Acle with Sammy and Sadie.

We had our torches on and we were pushing ourselves so hard with the pace, that I was out of breath and sweating which is not hard when you're a big girl.

The thing with Becky and me was a casual thing really. It started as a drunken one night stand thing. She was doing her sympathy thing, saying how hard it was being a lesbian and finding other lesbians let alone one who actually wanted to sleep with her or to settle down.

I was telling everyone how I was fat and ugly and no man in the world had done anything bad enough to have me as their girlfriend. It was Georgie who had silenced everyone by suggesting that if Becky and I both wanted to sleep with people, we should try sleeping with each other. We all laughed at first but I wasn't laughing the next morning when I woke up with Becky in my bed, I wasn't angry either.

My reaction was more confused yet pleasantly surprised. I wasn't gay though so it was just a strange drunken one off, followed by another one and another one. I wasn't even that sure I liked her to start with but she wouldn't go home. Then I began to realise I did quite like it but wasn't quite sure how to move things on.

I was selfish in that it was Becky that I was thinking of more than the others, I had been playing with her emotions unfairly, leading her on without telling her how I really felt and now she was laying there injured relying on me.

Anyway, in the chaos of the train crash, everyone was running around like headless chickens, apart from those who were hurt obviously. I was the one taking the register and there were several people missing even though I seemed to have seen everyone get off the train apart from Jessie, Charlie, and Jimmy. However, we found Jimmy laying near the door where the fire had started and he was so badly burned that I barely recognised him. My heart leapt when I saw Jessie and Charlie laying on the ground several moments after there had been a massive explosion in which a lot of us thought they might have been killed. However, there were still others missing.

Jessie looked like she was in major shock and was hiding her face from us all as she spoke deciding between us what we were going to do, if I didn't kill that little shit Greg for suggesting we all went to the Pub.

Sammy and Sadie were with me and neither of them was my favourite people in the world considering they had clearly both been in the pub despite doing quite well with their day's sales. Usually, neither of them was in the mood to walk very quickly but to be fair they did seem to realise the enormity of the situation and we were pushing the pace along the tracks.

With only the light of our torches on the track, the dark open marshes stretched for miles either side. We could not see the light of the Acle straight as it's very poorly lit and that night there were no cars on it due to works.

I'd seen the spaces between the fields each morning on the train, and it was filled with ditches and dykes and I didn't envy Chris and his group or Sharon and hers searching the marsh for survivors. I had this feeling that there could be people watching us out there in the darkness. It was like there were eyes watching us, you know how it is when you think you can feel someone's eyes on your back and it sends tingles up your spine. 'but' I said to myself as we walked that it was only cows or sheep, but then cows and sheep can be bloody scary.

I kept imagining horrible things in my head like poor Kate giving birth to her baby in a cold field and it not surviving, or Becky's leg bleeding out, and where the hell were the others who were missing? Lord knows what happened to Georgie, Amber, Jack and John. I'd seen them get off the train when the group came together but there was no sign of them at all.

Sammy was doing my head in too, she kept walking at the side of the track down the bank from Sadie and myself and when I asked her what she was doing it for she replied in her big northern Irish accent. 'In case a train comes and runs us du fuck over you silly woman.'

'You're stupid' Sadie told her bluntly, reminding her that it was a single track and that if there was another train coming the other way it would be at a station further up the line waiting for our train to pass it and the signal would remain red until it did. 'And' She added 'As our train is in a field back there it's not going to happen.'

All of a sudden Sammy screamed a piercing scream and we looked to the side to see her falling flat on her face.

She was up on her knees quickly enough and the three of us just stared at each other and the thing that had coursed Sammy to fall.

In the light of our torches, we all saw a girl lying beside the track badly injured. It was not one of the people we were looking for, she was blonde but it was not our friend Amber, this was a big tall woman. 'The lord only knows how this woman got here' Sammy said suddenly, making a cross on her chest.

The woman looked up at us breathing sharply as though she was in a lot of pain and struggling to breath. 'We need to help her' I shouted to the others getting down on my knees. Sadie, however, shook her head at me and showed me her hands covered in blood from a deep stab wound in the lady's side.

There was a pool of blood forming under her. A thousand reasons were forming in my head as to how she ended up out there in the dark, whatever this girl was doing here and whoever stabbed her, she was not long for this world.

The situation was hopeless as I looked out into the blackness, all we could do for her as we wondered how she came to be there was to hold her hand, so she knew she was not dying alone. She stuttered and tried weakly to tell us something but the language she used seemed to be something Sadie and I could not understand. Sammy, however, could well have been pretending she could understand to give the girl some comfort.

Sammy listened with shock and fear spreading across her face, then all of a sudden, the woman sat up with a jolt and put her arms around Sammy and whispered in her ear before falling back to the ground where the poor woman took her last breath.

None of us knew what to say to each other, a chill like ice ran down my neck as Sadie gently closed the woman's eyes with tears from her own rolling down her face. 'We need to get out of here' Sammy said suddenly.

'What did she say to you?' I asked her with fear and adrenaline tingling down my spine.

'Let's just get gone' she replied sharply, standing up having taken something from the woman's sock and her breast pocket.

On her feet, Sammy started to walk fast leaving Sadie and I to run after her.

'What was she mumbling about?' Sadie asked her breathlessly.

'It wasn't mumbling she was speaking ulster Irish' Sammy said breathlessly.

'In Norfolk?' I shrugged.

'Stranger things have happened' she breathed adding that she was not the only person in Norfolk who was from Northern Ireland.

When I told her it was strange that the woman had known she was from Northern Ireland she went quiet.

'What did she say' I repeated. Sammy stopped suddenly and I saw tears rolling down her face and a look of fear in her eyes like I'd never seen as she took out a cigarette and offered one to Sadie and me. I was almost tempted having been a smoker myself until recently but I pushed it away repeating the question.

She took a sip from a bottle of Irish whiskey, which she seemed to have got from nowhere, 'I pulled the whiskey out of her sock and the cigarettes from her top pocket' she said quietly continuing,

'She said that our worst nightmares are hiding out there in the dark, monsters, ghosts, witches, werewolves and the like. She said things that killed her are coming for us if we don't move. They've probably already got Georgie, John, Amber and that boy.'

'Jack' I added. She looked at me shakily lighting up her cigarette as more tears fell down her face then she spoke louder in a warning.

'She said they're trying to raise the devil out there in the marsh and killing all witnesses.'

She took a drag on her cigarette and sniffed before saying tearfully, 'I'm going to die.'

'Not if we run' I told her, thinking that the dead girl had been hallucinating but telling Sammy if we made a quick pace we'd be off of the marshes soon and in civilisation where we could call the police, ambulance, the army and whoever we needed.

'It's too late for me!' she whimpered, 'Not while your still alive' I told her dragging her arm as I started to walk fast but she froze to the spot.

'I took the whiskey from her sock and cigarettes from her top pocket' she called in the dark.

'So, you robbed a dead girl, and you need to tell the police that so you don't get yourself in the frame for her murder, but in the scale of things it's not that big' I said going back to pull her along.

'Not a big thing she yelled' staring at me and crying. She tapped her top pocket and her leg and glared at me.

My blood ran cold as she told us, 'I keep my cigarettes in the top pocket, I hide Irish whiskey in my sock, I have blonde hair and I speak fucking Ulster Gaelic.'

'What are you saying?' I quivered as her tone softened. I never saw anyone look so scared and confused as Sammy cried, 'That dead girl was me! That's my future.'

I stood there not sure if I should be angry at her for being silly and slowing us down, or if I should be very scared. However, I was definitely the latter of the two when all of the sudden something grabbed Sadie and took her from us before she had time to scream.

Kate's story Part 1

This is a poem I wrote for my John to put in his Christmas card and I felt I should publish it here.

A blunt and honest poem (Sorry I'm no linguist)

Before I met you, I was lonely and selfish not without regrets,

I counted in my five best friends, vodka and cigarettes. (And not just the legal ones)

One day I turned up late for work still drunk from the night before,

Jess put me with the new bloke and I thought, Oh god what a bore.

You were warm to me, I was rude to you, like turkey with cold gravy.

I picked on you for no reason and I must have driven you crazy.

Yet you to me were nothing but gold,

Just shut your mouth and did what you were told.

I threw a lot of shit at you, much more than most could hack.

Most newbies would have had enough by now but you kept coming back.

And when you saw me snorting coke you helped me through my rehab,

When I came out after three months, you took me for a Kebab.

You asked me are you better now I smiled and told you maybe,

As months went by you stole my heart now I'm pregnant with your baby.

Can't wait to live all the years to come,

now you're to be dad and I'm to be mum,

I never thought someone could make me, as happy as you can.

As long as the earth still turns, I'll be your girl you'll be my man.

Merry Christmas John love you always Kate xxx

So I used a bit of poetic license there in the card it seemed he would never get, but I didn't know that then as I lay there contracting quicker than I thought I should be. I was worried that I was miscarrying our son or daughter as I lay there in the wet grass sobbing my eyes out holding my sister's hand.

I kept thinking to myself that this must be punishment for all the shit I did when I was using drugs. I have to be honest when Jess talked about me being a pain in the backside in the early days she was spot on.

I was one of the people who was already working in sales when Jessie and Mandy started the company, they had joined the company I was working for, but they knew I wasn't happy and that's when they asked me to join their new company and I bit their hands off. They knew that I was a bit rough and ready but I came with experience, they didn't know about my bad side then. They knew I smoked a lot and liked a drink but what they didn't know is that I got into a bad crowd at school, I'd been smoking weed and drinking alcohol since I was about 15 but the harder drugs were a new thing.

I tell a lie in the poem as it was Jessie who caught me snorting coke in the toilets at Norwich train station and instead of reporting me to the police she and Mandy helped me pay for rehab and kept my job open. It was however my work partner John who came to see me every couple of days telling me that despite the fact I was always being rude and mean to him, taking my anger out on him stealing his money for cigarettes and drugs and basically being a diva all the time, he missed me and wanted me back at work.

He became my reason for not doing the things I used to, it was the hardest thing I ever did and it's hard to even now, but I wanted to make John proud of me as well as Jess and Mandy.

Rather than just give up the hard stuff I pushed myself to go the whole way, with not only cocaine but with the other stuff too. When I came out I'd also become teetotal and stopped all forms of smoking. When I finally came out after three months, he picked me up in his car and took me out for dinner.

Dinner wasn't actually a Kebab it was from a well-known fast food outlet but Kebab rhymes with rehab. When I told John I wanted to make up for how I treated him, he talked about how he wanted to look after me and be there for me and get in the way of all temptation and even wrap me up in cotton wool if it kept me away from the bad stuff.

The fact that my twin sister Becky worked for the company too was nothing to do with me. It was pure coincidence that she was good friends with Jessie's brother Chris.

It was hard that Becky and I didn't speak, yet we'd never argued really, I suppose when I was using drugs and for a while after, I just found her annoying with her bright coloured clothing and her loud voice, and she was always running. I thought she looked like a clown and was an embarrassment to me.

Really though my feelings about Becky said more about me than her, I was the embarrassment for not accepting her for what she was. I wanted to make peace with her and be like we were before she came out and before I hit self-destruct (The two things were not related) However eating humble pie is not easy and the right moment had not come until we were forced together.

I felt sick seeing my sister's leg so horribly broken even though I was in a hell of a lot of pain myself. However, mine was self-inflicted and hers was not deserved in any way. Sue, who was now seeing to Jim, had done a first-class job of bandaging her injury, but the blood was leaking through and I was scared for her life, but more importantly, I was scared for her sporting career. I never told her how proud I was when I heard she had trials for England women's rugby team, and she never knew that I went to watch her play in disguise, so I didn't distract her. However, that break in her leg looked so bad; she couldn't cry properly because it was hurting her too much and tears were just rolling down her face.

At first, when I reached out my hand she pulled hers away, but then just as I thought she was blanking me she rubbed her hand on her coat and smiled a little as she reached back and took mine and said with a nervous little laugh.

'Watch my gay doesn't rub off on you.' I looked across at her shocked and wanted to say something back to that statement but I was hit by a massive contraction that took my breath away.

'JOHN WHERE ARE YOU?' I yelled into the darkness as I got my breath back.

'H-he will c-come b-back because he loves you,' I heard Becky whisper to me through her pain.

'But he wouldn't do this' I told her, 'John would not ever leave, because he loves me no matter what I do if he isn't here he must be....'

But I didn't want to think of him dead or hurt.

'What's it like when somebody loves you?' Becky asked suddenly, squeezing my hand. I looked over at her shocked that she had even asked, 'So are the rumours that your sleeping with a certain larger than life red-headed lady true?' Becky nodded and grimaced and cried out in pain as she was caught by a sneeze, then she said gently 'It's friends with benefits not love' adding that it was an experimental thing to see if Mandy is really a lesbian and that they were not really a couple.

'Test her limits' I grinned weakly asking if Mandy ate toast, Becky shook her head and told me Mandy had stopped eating toast in favour of fruit salad, on her advice to try and drop some weight.

'Well that in itself is a clue' I smiled, telling her I was going to say nick a slice of toast but maybe a grape was better, 'if she gets in a grump them maybe she's not the one, but if she is pretending to be angry or play slaps you or even steals one back that's very good'

I smiled, as I told her all the things John let me get away with all because he loved me, one example was that morning when he offered to make me breakfast and coffee.'

'I told him I didn't want any, but then his toast smelt so good that I ate all his while he was making coffee, he said nothing and as he turned to put more in the toaster I drank all his coffee. His only reaction to my naughtiness was to tickle my ribs give me a big kiss and ruffle my hair before he made more.

John loved my little naughty moments; he said the fact I felt comfortable to do these things to him was a big turn on. My list of little acts of naughtiness included waiting for him to run himself a bath and then jumping in it while he was on the toilet, shaving my legs with his razor, and taking his clothes to wear over my baby bump without asking. Most recently that evening I did the naughtiest thing yet, when I nicked his hankie out of his top pocket and blew my nose in it then put it back.

Becky tried not to laugh when I told her this, but we were interrupted by another contraction. Thankfully it wasn't strong enough to push but it was hard enough for me to lose my breath. 'John get your arse over here NOW' I screamed into the dark, but there was still nothing as Sue came and checked me over.

'You know this is the longest conversation we've had in 3 years' Becky smiled uneasily, I teased that it was only because she was always rushing around and I couldn't keep up with her.

'Well I'll have to break my leg more often' she said with a hint of sarcasm, before adding 'Is this really because you hate gay people?'

I was actually hurt by her accusation that I was homophobic, 'What have I done to make you think that sis?' I asked in a tone that sounded harsher than it was meant.

'It's because you don't like having a freak as a twin sister, isn't it?' She cried suddenly, 'You don't want me near your baby in case it turns out like me.' There were tears rolling down her face, but I was a little hurt by what she was implying. I would never keep my sister from her niece or nephew or them from her; she must have overheard something and taken it the wrong way.

'People told me the things you said about me' she sobbed, 'You said some horrible things about me, you said you couldn't stand being in the same room as me.'

I was left cold by this, no wonder she barely spoke to me, I did not remember saying those things. Becky was a lot of things and a liar was not one of them. I must have said them before I got clean from the booze and the drugs, but if I had said them to people about her it must have been taken out of context or was it that they weren't but I'd grown up a very since I said them. Either way quarrel between us had gone so far that we didn't know what we were arguing about.

'Becks I'm sorry for those horrible things I s...' 'Don't be' She interrupted 'You only said what everyone was thinking, I'm a twisted transvestite clown, who nobody understands. I am just a joke. People don't know if I'm a woman or a man and to be honest, I don't know myself, I'd be embarrassed to be my own sister.'

I sat there numb; I had always thought Becky was comfortable with what she was and didn't care what I thought.

'Becky' I said quietly 'Why would you care what some uptight washed up drunken drug addict thinks of you, when you're a smart intelligent successful erm... Person?'

'Because' she sniffed, 'you're still my sister and my best friend even though we don't speak.' 'Well we're speaking now' I said softly.

'Jealousy' She said suddenly, 'What?' I sniffed as Becky wiped a tear. 'While you were screwing up your life I was the brave golden girl who had the balls to come out. Rather than help I revelled in the fact that I was the golden girl with all our family and ran you down and talked behind your back and said things just as bad as what you said about me.'

She sniffed hard again and continued 'Now you've sorted yourself out and got a lovely man and a baby on the way you're golden and I'm just that crazy half woman half man clown who did nothing to help you.

'What made you think I deserved your help?' I was saying when a figure suddenly walked into the light.

'John' I shouted suddenly, it was my fiancé, 'John where have you been all this time? I thought you were dead.' He turned sharply as if I had made him jump from whatever world he was walking in. There were tears in his eyes and he had been wandering aimlessly. When he looked at me his eyes widened not with the usual look of love he gave me, but it seemed like fright, as though I had done something to scare him, then all of a sudden, he just passed out and dropped to the ground between Becky and I with the pair of us screaming.

Going towards the road, By Chris

I'm not going to go on about what happened in the build-up to the crash other than that somebody seemed to follow myself and Becky back through the town, but then disappeared when we got to Asda.

That was when we saw Jess and Mandy and played our joke on them which backfired and I learned many things from that I should have known.

For example, that my lovely little sister was 23 and very brave and a very talented athlete and I was 32 and a big fat fairy who stood no chance against her in a fight.

Me and my sister Jessie get on so well and always have especially seeing as she is nine years younger than I am and three brothers came between us. When she was a kid she was very clingy to our brother Dave who was only two years older than her and his friend Charlie who she had a massive crush on.

Our mum was paid as a child minder but being the eldest child, a lot of the time I was the one who was keeping an eye on her customers along with my younger siblings. Jessie was the only member of the family to stand up for me when I came out and because of our family's reaction she took my side and cut off all ties with our parents, which is something I did not ask her to do.

I also thought as a big brother it was my job to look after my little sister, but she was the one who looked after me. Giving me a job in her company is just one of the ways she helped me out over the years.

So, Becky is my best mate, it is very strange for a 32-year old man and a nearly 21-year-old woman to be best friends. I love her to death but the fact that we met in a gay bar says it all, we have a lot of fun together but there is no sexual attraction there at all.

Anyway, I said I wouldn't go into the back story from the start so I'll continue from after the crash.

Under Mandy's instructions, I was to head the group going towards the A47 acle straight and instructions were to shine our lights on every blade of grass and shout for all we were worth to find our friends and colleagues while the others went off to get help or search the other side.

So, I took with me Ben, Cathy, and Rachel; there was a mix of ages there with Cathy being the oldest of us and Rachel the youngest at 27.

I worried as we walked past the burning train about what we would find. Not only the missing people might be dead which is awful, but how would my poor little sister cope with the loss of her friends. Knowing her, she would want to blame herself for putting those people in that situation, even though it was not her fault and she was giving them employment.

I tried to hug her as we split apart to search but she just clung to her friend Charlie covering her face with one of her handkerchiefs and didn't say a word to anyone, but instead to drag James and Charlie up the tracks as fast as she could still keeping her face covered.

My friend Becky needed help, her leg was very badly broken and I would have wanted to stay with her and help if the situation was different, but she had her twin sister to support her even though they both barely spoke I was sure they did care about each other, but then we were also alarmed when

Kate seemed to have a contraction.

Finding Kate's partner alive became the first thing on our minds as well of course as finding the other three missing persons.

Ben, Cathy, Rachel, and I spread out walking toward the road through the boggy field with a gap of about 20 metres between each of us. I didn't need Cathy or Rachel to shout to me where they were because both girls were coughing and sneezing in the smoke of the train. I became aware a lot of the girls were ill, in fact all of them were and only a few of the guys.

Our voices carried as we shouted across the Marsh for Amber, Jack, Georgie and John but there was no answer from any of them. However, we were still in the light of the burning train when I heard the most blood -curdling scream and turned my torch to see Rachel falling to her knees. The rest of us came running over as fast as we could to her aid. She was on the floor with her head in her hands in front of her was a melted bag and attached to it was a hand, and connected to the hand was an arm and attached to the arm was a body burned so black that the face was gone and it smelt like burnt chicken.

Nobody said a thing, we all saw the letters written the name badge. John F Greymore. Our friend and colleague whose fiancé was giving birth to their child in the next field.

Rob Barn Going left

So, I know what you're thinking, what was the great Rob barn doing working for a Sales company? What you're probably thinking is, who the hell is Rob Barn?

People who were around in the early 2000s will remember a band from Lowestoft in Suffolk who had a few global smash hits then they split up. Most people remember the name of the lead singer, but does anyone remember who the drummer or the bass player were? Well, that band was called the darkness, and no I wasn't in it. However, my tale is one of how the mighty fall and my point is that nobody remembers the bass player.

In my youth, I was the song writer and bass player in a rock band called Rockcorn storm, which consisted of me and three other lads and a girl from my school.

Against all odds, we got signed with a record company, in the mid 80's we were playing Wembley arena and crowds cheered and screamed, but that was usually about 15 minutes after we left the stage and the main act came out.

We opened for some big acts at the time including Bonjovi, Bryan Adams, Meat loaf and Queen to name a few before our own single made it into the charts.

We were household names for a while, well for the 4-week period that our somewhat mainstream debut single 'Love how you rock' was in the charts. The music and lyrics were written by me, but all credit went to our lead singers Shane Sullivan and Lizzy Lambert, because they had the looks and the voices and cooler names than Robert Barn.

They also had this fake story going on that they were a couple, but that was all media rubbish and they didn't even really like each other a great deal.

So we had all the things we wanted, the fame, fans of both genders and the money. When we weren't touring in front of our own screaming fans, the guys were dating women who wouldn't have touched any of us with a barge pole if we weren't rich and famous and Lizzy was sleeping with anything that moved. We could have made it really big but instead of concentrating on the music we enjoyed the life style too much.

After a short romance, I married a young model called Alicia from London; we could have been another big showbiz couple.

We had money and fame and Alicia and I had just welcomed the arrival of our first daughter Gemma, when the band's second album was released. Unfortunately, with the rush to keep us in the public eye and with distractions, the band's second album was written with love but produced with little care and to be frank it was not a classic and sales bombed.

Within 18 months we went from playing arenas to playing local theatres before the record company dropped us all together and we went our separate ways.

I continued to work where I could be playing guitar and singing in local pubs and so on, as well as running kid's discos. However, I'm a musician, not a singer and when the fame and the money goes so does the attention of those who only wanted you for those things.

My wife and kids were always more important to me than the fame and the money. My wife however preferred the fame and the money and after 2 more years of struggling to keep our marriage, she filed for divorce and cleaned me out taking the house, the kids, and what was left of the money after some bad financial decisions.

People see things in different ways I suppose; my ex-wife might say some stuff about me being a bad father because I couldn't keep up her high maintenance demands or me calling her a cheating slut when she probably wasn't one at all. The truth is I was down and out and music wasn't making any money and by the time 1997 came, I was doing odd agency work in Norwich.

Why Norfolk when I'm from Chelmsford? Because my Ex-wife moved the kids up here to be closer to their grandparents meaning if I didn't move too, they'd be too far away. I suppose you can't blame a single mum of two for moving closer to her parents for back up, but I will because she should have stayed with me in the first place.

Anyway, that's how I ended up in Norwich. I met Mandy while I was working at McDonald's as a cleaner (Yes that's how bad it got) I was emptying the bins when I walked past her out the back having a smoke when she yelled, 'Oi new bloke weren't you the bass player in that band Rockcorn storm?' When I nodded, she stood there with her mouth open for about ten minutes before telling me her brother had been a huge fan at the height of our fame.

That was when we struck up a friendship; it made me laugh that she knew who I was and respected my individual musical ability while openly stating she had not been a fan of the band because the lead singer was a talentless gobshite. Rather than laughing at me she had been rather sympathetic, seeing that I was struggling with the rent and paying maintenance money for the kids. I think that was why she came to see me when she and Jess started the company. She pitched it to me in this way in her booming voice,

'Tell people who you are and they might remember you. Then you can give them your sob story of how you hit rock bottom and tell them you're now on your way back up and they will buy things from you. Oh and remember to tell them what you're selling.

She was right, knocking on people's doors and talking about the old days did sell more health insurance policies then talking about the policies did. It was a good thing that most people in the group were either too old or too young to remember me in my 15 minutes of fame, because that meant nobody took the piss about how the mighty fall.

To most people, I was just Rob, and that was just fine. I was doing okay for the first time in a long time, earning more than in McDonald's, making new friendships, and getting on well enough with my ex-wife that she was letting me have our girls for Christmas that year.

When the train crashed, it obviously took us all by surprise and we were all in shock. We were all running around madly. In hindsight

with a clear mind, I might have questioned Jessie and Mandy's decision to put Sharon in charge of one of the search parties when she had been drinking. However, when there were more than 20 of us in the group, it was hard for everyone to know everyone and Sharon was one of the people I didn't know so well. I knew Sharon to say hello to but we'd not really had that much reason to speak to each other. I had heard that she had a reputation for spreading herself a bit thin, or using her body to sell the health insurance to dirty old men. So basically, she wasn't my type of person from that reputation.

I think we were all thunderstruck, not only because we were all bruised and shaken from the impact and the explosions and the fire, not to mention the dead body we had to step over. The only one of us without the blood of the poor train conductor on our shoes would have been that poor girl Georgie who didn't have any feet, but even she would have had it on her false feet.

I heard that they never retrieved his body before the train went up in smoke. I suppose if somebody is already dead, then getting the living out alive matters more. If that had been my son, I would have understood why nobody got him out. I think what shocked us most is that there were people missing when we had all seen them get out alive yet by the calling of the register they were gone.

I think as the four of us, Sharon, Greg Mike and myself went off to search the marshes, we thought we would find the 4-missing people quite quickly. They had no reason to have gone far if anywhere at all. This was even more so for Georgie seen as she was only wearing one of her prosthetic legs when I saw her. One does wonder why any of them would have gone any further away from the train. In my heart, I hoped they hadn't gone back to help and got caught in the explosion but it was my fear that I had seen John headed that way.

Sharon, despite what I'd heard about her was like a woman possessed as we began the search. Any worries that I had about her ability to lead were answered when the moaning little upstart Greg tried to say he wasn't coming and he was going to find a pub. Before I could smack him one, Sharon had him by the ear like a mother in the 50's disciplining a naughty child as she dragged him off in the dark. Mike and I exchanged somewhat frightened looks as we hurried after them not wanting to get on her bad side.

After around 30 minutes there was nothing to show for our searching. We were sweeping a line with about 20 metres between each of us shouting the names of the missing people. We stopped for a couple of minutes to check in with each other to make sure we were all safe. As Sharon lit up what was somewhere between her 3rd and 7th cigarette in the 40 minutes or so since the train had crashed, I saw tears of terror in her eyes.

'We need to go back the other way' Greg was saying, and he added that if John, Amber, Jack, and Georgie had any sense they'd be in the pub. 'And what about John with his girlfriend going into labour? Should he go to the pub? I asked angrily. His answer made me want to swing for him. He just calmly announced that if he were John, he would be in the pub and probably take Kate with him. I had to hold Sharon back as she aimed a slap at him but ended up hitting me instead.

The thing about Greg was that he sounded like an upper-class twit, the guy had intelligence but he also had arrogance and often a lack of respect with it. That's how we perceived him on occasions, however having got to know him I've realised that he's not that bad. He doesn't always realise that his intelligence works on a different level and something that's obvious to him is not always so to other people.

We were just as guilty for not listening to him; people thought he was obnoxious and uncaring by saying these things. If he had pointed out what he saw as obvious a little earlier thing would have turned out differently.

As Sharon apologised for hitting me Greg just looked at us both quietly then said calmly 'There's a pub on the road about a mile or so from the train.

In anger at his further comment about the pub, Sharon grabbed him by the collar and drew her hand back to wallop him. However, she stopped dead and lowered her hand without taking her gaze off of Greg, but her angry look changed as we all had a sudden epiphany. Either Greg really was an unfeeling asshole or we should all have been paying more attention to him, including the others in the team who had gone in their own directions.

After a moment's silence it was Sharon who spoke not taking her eyes off of Greg.

'There's a phone in the pub and none of us listened to him' she breathed. 'He wasn't being a shit' she added, 'he wasn't talking about going for a drink. He was pointing out the obvious and we should have listened to him.

Sharon pulled Greg towards her and kissed him on the cheek, as she did so he pulled a rather disgusted face as though the thought of her touching him was repulsive (in hindsight it might have been because her breath was full of smoke) After she pecked him on the cheek she then slapped him quite hard on the very same spot saying that it was for not making himself clear earlier.

Following that rather heated moment, the four of us closed in together so we could all hear each other speak. There was a heated but friendly discussion regarding whether or not we should abandon our orders to search that area and go to the pub. I remembered now having driven along the Acle straight in the past that there is a tight bend in it as it almost reaches the railway, on that bend, is the pub Greg was talking about. Chris and his group were already headed in the direction of the road but they were heading north and might not think to go for the pub once they got to the road. Jessie, Charlie and James were walking east towards Great Yarmouth, but they were following the tracks, they would pass within a few hundred metres of the pub but probably not see it from the tracks. We thought the pub was Northeast of the train and neither of those groups would hit the pub directly.

We'd been searching for a while and with no sign of the missing people, it could be a better bet for us to aim straight for the pub. For all, we knew the missing people might well have been found already. So, we all agreed that we should abandon our search and go for the pub. We started to walk back heading east of the light from the burning train so that we met with the road closer to the pub.

We trudged back towards the tracks at a breathless pace following Sharon who despite not being in the peak of fitness had found an extra gear and was almost running across the dark muddy fields, never mind the fact the place was crisscrossed with dykes full of cold water. I tried to explain to her that we didn't want to be falling in the water as hypothermia was the last thing we needed to be dealing with.

We'd been walking for about 15 minutes when Mike stopped dead. He was just stood there talking to himself and looking from the now dimming light from the train to our left and then to the lights of Yarmouth to our right, then to our very far left where we could not see Acle at all. Very far to our right along the line there was a very faint light, which I hoped and prayed was Jessie and her group making progress towards Yarmouth.

'What's the holdup?' Sharon was demanding to know as she came stomping back. 'The train is almost dead centre of the marsh' He said not looking at us. 'That's great' Sharon snapped 'Now we know that, can we get going to the pub please?' 'But that's just it' he breathed. 'We're going the wrong way!' 'What?' Sharon demanded.

'If the train had gone around the bend,' he breathed hard 'We would see Acle on our left but not Yarmouth on our right.'

Sharon and I and Greg all looked at each other as if to say 'Shit he's right!' The pub was on the bend and the lighting on the Acle straight was and still is very poor (Remember it was also closed for repairs) but if Mikes theory was right, we should have headed Northwest as opposed to north east as we had been. It was Mandy's party that would be missing the pub by a few hundred metres and not Jessie. No matter which way it was we needed to get there quickly because with the road shut the pub would be too and we would have to break in.

Another idea that hit me was that if the road was being worked on, there would be workman with transport to get us help. Looking up and down the unlit stretch where I knew the road to be, it worried me that there didn't seem to be any work at all going on there, in-fact I wondered why they had even bothered closing it.

We had been walking less than a minute when Mike suddenly tripped and fell. My first fear is that he had fallen into a dyke. However, he was on his feet again in seconds and had picked up whatever caused him to trip. It was a cloth, it was covered in mud but in the light, it seemed somewhat familiar like I'd seen it before. Sharon shrieked in shock as she saw it in the light. 'That's one of those pocket squares Georgie made.' 'Of course!' I thought to myself, Georgie was a lovely kind lady and one of her many hobbies was embroidery and earlier in the year she'd given every member of the team a gift of a personalised pocket square. 'Who's, is it?' Sharon demanded as Mike tried to unfold it.

In the light of my head torch, I saw the initials J.L.R

'Jessica Louise Renaulds' Sharon breathed.

We all stared at each other. We all saw Jessie walk up the tracks with Charlie there was no way her pocket square could have made it out to as far as we were unless something had happened to her. Greg suggested half-heartedly that it might have blown on the wind.

However, the wind was very light and there was no way that could have happened, plus I could still make out the very faint light far off in the distance making progress along the track. When Sharon suggested that Jessie might have given the pocket square to somebody else, we all began to shout again for our missing friends as we continued towards the pub with our hearts racing with panic.

Greg was the next person to fall, and he screamed like a girl. If it hadn't been for the seriousness of the situation I might have laughed, but I realised why Greg had screamed and I was almost sick. In the light of my head lamp, I could see that Greg had tripped over a female leg which had been detached from its body. All sorts of things were running through my mind as to how a leg got to be there so many miles from anywhere. Sharon however just picked up the leg and gazed at it like a woman possessed.

'You mad woman that someone's leg!' I told her in disgust.

'Exactly' she smiled 'It's not a real leg it's one of Georgie's prosthetic legs which means...'

'It means Georgie's been here' Greg added. 'Or Amber' Sharon finished. According to Sharon, Amber had been carrying one of Georgie's two false legs when they got off the train as it seemed one of them wouldn't fit. Just as with the pocket square, nothing could explain what it was doing there. Neither Georgie, Amber or anyone had had a reason to go anywhere let alone this far from the train.

As Sharon and I both reached down to help Greg to his feet, the pair of us slipped and fell to the floor ourselves knocking Mike down with us. After much swearing, we all managed to sit ourselves up in time for another shock. When we looked up, we were surrounded by a ring of bright light that pierced the darkness and scared us so much that we grabbed each other in fright. The ring of light came from 20 or so flaming torches. The 20 torches were held by 20 people all wearing dark and terrifying masks.

Jessica part 2

So now we come to my second piece.

I would like to start my second stint of writing in the hope that this is all making some sort of sense as we flash between each-others positions to keep the story in the correct time scale

I would like to apologise if the end of Charlie's bit was a little miss leading because he's only male. I say this in jest of course because he is such a lovely guy. As it has been mentioned we are all here together writing our story in the pub and he's here with me now and he's just been to the shop up the road and bought me a big net of satsumers and made me a big cup of coffee, love him. I may not have mentioned that I'm currently very pregnant with my 3rd baby and my two-year-old son George is sat here sleepily watching CBeebies on my Ipad.

Anyway, the strange girl clinging to Charlie hiding her face was in fact me.

When Charlie saw me however he jumped to the wrong conclusion and asked, 'Who are you? And what have you done with my Jess?' This is the problem with men (I tease) jumping to all sorts of conclusions when all that had really happened is I took my glasses off because they were smashed in the blast.

I had been hiding my face because I wanted to get walking and didn't want to waste any time fixing the injury to my face, which I was hiding under my handkerchief. I think it looked worse than it was but I didn't want time wasted on me when we had friends out there missing, and Charlie would have wanted to stop and do first aid on me. Unfortunately, the cut was caused by my glasses smashing in the blast when the train exploded, which may I add was the scariest thing in my life up until that moment.

Any plans of sitting at home watching TV the next day were going to have to be replaced by dragging my flu-ridden backside to the optician. Mores the fact I would actually need some kind friend to take me there as I couldn't see.

When Charlie realised what had happened, he joked that I should have gone to spec savers and got a spare pair. When I told him I had done, and he asked me if I'd brought my spare pair I had the humiliation of telling him that they were my spares, because I broke my costly designer pair when I slipped on the ice a week earlier and didn't tell him in-case he worried about me.

So that's why I had asked Charlie to lead, I was embarrassed to admit that I couldn't see a bloody thing.

Charlie was good about it; he told me how brave I was to have gone charging out into the night. 'Well I can't sit around and not help while our friends could be dying' Was my retort,

'Plus, it's my fault we're here in the first place.' I went on to tell them how it was me that had spoken to the clients that we were selling the health insurance plans for and arranged to work in Great Yarmouth for a week and a half.

I explained to James how the business worked knowing that Charlie knew the ins and outs of it. I explained how we were given a list of places to canvas and a time scale then Mandy and I decided on where to go when and told everyone else the week before.

We had been due to canvas Ipswich but I was too exhausted to drive my mini full of people and stuff, and then walk miles. I wasn't going to make my staff pay for the train to Suffolk so we'd settled for Great Yarmouth only to find the Acle straight (The road across the marsh) was closed for repairs for 2 weeks and we had to either drive around or get the train, and due to timing and cheaper tickets the train had seemed the best option.

Charlie was silent, but unable to see I felt somebody touch my back and feel under my blazer jacket. I shrieked a little, but calmed when James told me it was him and he said the sweetest thing when I asked him why he done it.

'Well' he laughed, 'with all the hard physical and mental work and things you do for the company just so we can have jobs and income, I thought you might be hiding your wonder woman costume under there, because that's what everyone calls you behind your back.'

I went red with embarrassment at such a compliment and I asked Charlie if he had paid him to say it and told James that kind of flattery could earn him employee of the month (We didn't have an employee of the month because we valued everyone the same.

'You two are such a lovely couple' James added. (James had joined after Jo had left Charlie)

'We're not a couple' Charlie told him. 'I've known Jess 20 years' he continued adding 'I asked her out earlier and she said no but we still love each other as friends right Jessie?'

'I didn't say no' I told him firmly. 'You didn't?' 'No Charlie' I said quietly thinking back now to the moment when Mandy's joke had made him walk away.

'Before that horrible joke which Mandy is very sorry for,' I told him, 'I was trying to say I want to stay home in the warm tomorrow and blow this cold out of my nose so we can have fun when I am well enough to go out.'

'And' I smiled 'I was rather hoping you'd like to come over and make hot drinks and switch the videos over and pass the tissues.'

'If we make it out of here' He said squeezing my hand, 'The first thing I am doing with you is getting you new glasses' he smiled.' Then I'll make the drinks change the videos and pass the tissues.

(Videos or VHS is what us old people had before DVD and Blu ray)

For a long time, we just walked without saying a word to each other about what happened. The cold wind was battering us from what seemed like all sides stinging my face as I struggled a little to breathe. Charlie had insisted on taking my bag because I'd walked a lot further than he had earlier in the day. I didn't protest as I was struggling with pain in my side where he had landed on me when we fell.

None of us wanted to speak about what happened on the train or the horrors we'd seen. If I'd been looking for a reason to forget about what I'd done to Charlie it wouldn't have been this.

Tom was dead and most likely so was the train driver, none of us knew either of them well, but still, surely they had families who were expecting them to come home. Tom was just a nice young boy with his whole life ahead of him; it was just so unfair that he died like that.

My concern now was for those who were missing and doing all we could to stop them joining the list of dead.

Jack Amber and Georgie were all seen getting off the train, yet none of them was there when Mandy called their names, those three would not have disappeared without good reason. John too, there was no way on earth he would have left Kate unless something had happened to him.

Charlie kept checking our mobile phones every few minutes to see if we could get a signal to alert the emergency services. If you're not old enough to remember the 90's, mobile phones were rather primitive compared to 2017, they were certainly not as common as they are today. Their batteries lasted forever because there wasn't colour let alone Internet for google maps. The network coverage in most areas of Norfolk was poor, I thought it might be better out in the open but there was nothing.

We'd been walking in a straight line towards Yarmouth for about 45 minutes before James nervously spoke. 'We should have been nearly there by now' He said shakily.

He was right, we were all in quite good physical shape, I had one of those step counters which people used to measure exercise in the days before smart phones and strava, I used it to check roughly how far I walked when working. I passed it to Charlie who read it allowed telling me that we walked roughly 2.3 miles in 48 minutes, 'That's not fast enough' I panicked, 'we need to pick up the pace guys!'

In hindsight, it was probably the shock of the situation that was clouding my judgement; I was a fit girl I prided myself on regularly completing up to 4 miles in an hour and swam lengths of the pool with Georgie 3 mornings a week. I was angered at my self-being so slow and didn't want to hear when Charlie told me it was not my fault that I was ill.

I however instead rudely told him to be quiet and start jogging until James spoke over both of us and said, 'Look guys this marsh is 8 miles across, if were halfway across and we've covered 3 miles then we've only got one more to go, but if we were more than half way across then the other group had less to walk and they're probably already in Acle getting help and that's if the train company haven't already sent a search party.'

'Yeah what he said' Charlie added breathlessly.

I wasn't listening; I blamed myself, I decided to put 20 people on the train when we could easily have gone in cars despite the Acle straight being closed.

My head was banging, my throat and face were stinging, my nose was dripping and I was streaming in sweat but stupidly I ignored the wheezing and tightness in my chest.

I pushed on hysterically despite Charlie asking if we could at least slow down for a sip of water. I couldn't see where I was going but as long as I could feel the track bed under my feet we were going the right way.

All of a sudden, my breathing difficulties took a turn for the worse, I stopped dead but I couldn't catch my breath. It was like I was breathing but there was no oxygen getting to my body and my head was spinning.

I remember looking up at Charlie in the torch light as I crumpled to my knees in pain.

I heard James in the background panicking saying, 'Charlie what in the hell is happening to her?'

Then in my panic I heard Charlie's voice say, 'I think Jess is having a massive asthma attack!'

For a moment everything was black, even the limited vision I had was gone but I felt something in my mouth and I took a sharp breath and felt a cold misty spray. 'Slow breathing Jess keep it calm'' It wasn't Charlie's voice I could hear, but it was a soft, warm male voice at my side and several figures came into my vision and my heart pounded as my lungs screamed.

Charlie (Love him) was kneeling holding my inhaler with the massive spacer connected; he must have seen me do it enough times to figure it out. But the voice I heard was not his; it belonged to a young man on my left-hand side who seemed to have his own source of light.

There was a girl too to my left- hand side, she was young blonde and beautiful, and I thought for a moment we had found Jack and Amber but it was not them.

Concentrating hard on my breathing I couldn't speak but just looked on with confused love into the faces of my big brother Dave and his lovely girlfriend Sarah as their ghosts smiled at me. 'Hang on in there little sister, you nearly died then but you'll be okay with Charlie here!' Dave smiled.

His familiar voice was a whisper on the wind. I couldn't take my mouth from the inhaler to speak as I felt Charlie give me a second puff but I heard my own voice whisper, 'I miss you guys.' 'We're always here keeping an eye on our loved ones' Sarah told me with a smile. 'What's heaven like?' I heard myself ask, 'Couldn't you tell we went to hell,' Dave's smiled jokingly.

'For us, it's love for each other with motor bikes and pubs' Sarah smiled, 'But you're not invited until you're at least 80' Dave added,

'You need to listen quickly sweetheart,' Sarah told me, Dave continued smiling 'We are so proud of you for everything you've achieved, but this tonight was no accident, all your friends are alive and safe for now but there's something big going on. We don't know what but it isn't good and there are many people out here tonight other than your friends.' I tried to listen but the ghosts were already fading as I got the Ventolin into my body. I heard Dave rushing his words to me. As he was fading I caught him saying something along the lines of telling me not to make up with our parents until they apologised to Chris and I (Maybe not even then)

The last thing I heard him say 'Was for god sake hurry up and kiss Charley!'

They were gone and Charlie's out of focus face was all I could see, I felt his warm hand supporting my back and roughing my hair as he spoke gently. 'Well done Jessie' he was saying 'keep it calm sweetheart.' Still a little way from comfortable I took control of the inhaler myself trying to smile at Charlie with my eyes and reached out with my other arm and snuggled Charlie into me until I could breathe.

Charlie and I just looked at each other for a moment even though couldn't see much. He took something else out of my hand bag and I felt him put one of my clean hankies in my hand, I thanked him weakly and he rubbed my shoulders as I sat there giving my nose a thorough clear out. When I was finished blowing my nose, without saying a word I pulled him towards me as we sat there and slipped our tongues into each other's mouths and totally forgot what we were doing there, for what could have been a hundred years.

All those years of wanting and never getting, loving and never quite telling, wishing he would like me back, and being too blind to see he already did. It was even better than I could ever have imagined and I could have spent the rest of my life on the cold tracks kissing my man.

However, when we finally pulled apart both Charlie and I both seemed to have forgotten why we were there. He reached down and took out his flask and poured a cup of coffee and passed it to me. We sat down with our legs out, our feet against the tracks and leaned our backs on each other and passed the coffee to each other and talked about our surprise at having kissed after all these years.

I was still trembling badly but wasn't sure if it was from the kiss or the Ventolin coursing through me, I hadn't had an attack in a long time.

'Why on earth did we not do that before? Charlie breathed as I sipped the coffee. 'You being engaged to my friend until a few months ago might have been part of the reason' I teased. Still in shock. 'Sorry about that' he said nervously. I told him not to be sorry about it because he loved her.

'I did' he said quietly adding, 'I loved you first and always have but I'm not fit to lick your boots.' 'You can lick them if you want' I said trying not to giggle as I reminded him we had been in a field and my fake fur boots were probably smeared in cow shit.

I sneezed twice more and sat for a moment blowing my nose with a big honk, and then took the cup of steaming coffee from Charlie and had another sip.

'Charlie' I said bluntly, passing the coffee back to him, 'I always knew you loved me but I always thought it was like a brother loves a little sister he wasn't able to have, but if you had feelings why didn't you say and did you really think you weren't good enough?'

Thinking back, I learned a lot of the things I was good at from Charlie, it was him that taught me to swim and ride a bike as a child, it was him that showed me the ropes at my first job, he even gave me driving lessons even though it wasn't legal because he was only 19.

'It wasn't the done thing to start a relationship with your best friend's sibling.'

I nodded and thought about it for a second while I sipped more coffee. He was right, when we were kids, relationships with your best friends siblings were not the done thing and probably still are not. I thought I'd twist the situation and make him laugh, so as I passed the coffee I teased him.

'I fully agree with that statement,' I laughed 'there's no way I'd let you be in a relationship with any of my brothers. I heard him spray spit the coffee through his teeth laughing as I shuffled my bottom back. I turned to face him then I put my arms around him and snuggled my head into his shoulder and clung to him for warmth and I felt his arms around me tightly as the cold wind blew my long hair in all directions

'Is that your way of saying you were my best friend?' He asked softly in my ear as we rubbed each other in an effort to keep warm.

'Did you only hang out with my brothers because I did?' I asked bluntly. 'Not to start with,' He replied running his fingers through my hair, 'but I only continued because of you.'

'And the fact that my mum was paid as your child minder until you were at high school,' I laughed pulling at his leg.

'You want to know how long I've had a crush on you?' I sniffed rubbing my seemingly ever dripping nose with my hankie. He nodded.

I asked him if he remembered the time when I was 12 and he was 14 and I was home from school on my own in bed with an asthma flare up and was hooked up to my nebulizer while my parents were at work and he skipped school and bought me chocolates and a get-well card. 'The days when a simple box of chocolates could make you feel so much better' he nodded.

'Well my crush on you started years earlier' I laughed quite honestly.

'I ate the chocolates and threw up and you took the blame' he laughed. 'You still owe me another box' I teased.

'Do you remember that time your mum thought we were having sex and came storming into your bedroom?' He laughed hugging me tighter, 'And we were just jumping up and down on my bed cos you were excited because you beat me at chess for the first time.' I smiled adding that at the time I had no idea what sex was giggling incoherently.

It got worse when Charlie told me there was a rumour suggesting that I still didn't know what sex was.

I just smiled and informed him regretfully that the existence of my virginity was only wishful thinking on my part, after a horrible first relationship which I ended after only a few weeks.

'So' he said softly, 'These must be the only circumstances where a smart business woman like you, who earns three times what I do, gets together with an employee and it might last if we're lucky.'

'3 things Charlie, 'I told him,

'1, I already told you you're Mandy's employee, two this relationship absolutely will last and 3' I paused and blew my nose while I figured out how to tell Charlie that as part owner I actually earned 12 times what he did in a year. That was why I often bought everyone food because I felt guilty about making so much money. (The contractors set the payment rules not me!) When I told him he just laughed and said he regretted turning down the 3rd partnership Mandy and I offered him when we started our company.

'Though' I told him, still not breathing right 'I would give all the money in my bank account and more for another kiss.'

I felt him lift his head and he whispered gently in my ear you can have this one for free.

With that, he took me back to heaven for a good few minutes.

'So, here's the question' Charlie asked, once I'd finished attending to my runny nose again. 'What do I call you now?' I had a little think about it.

'Boss lady' I giggled, 'You're not my boss remember he teased.

'Okay well just call me Jessica like always' I smiled.

'I never call you Jessica' he insisted until I reminded him that he had shouted my full name at me when I wouldn't get off the train.

'The train' I shouted suddenly, what on earth were we doing sitting there kissing when our friends were missing. I could have shouted at Charlie for not reminding me what we were supposed to be doing, but strangely he was just as annoyed at himself for somehow forgetting.

We both got caught up at the moment and just couldn't help ourselves but if it was anyone's fault it was mine for pushing myself in too the asthma attack. I couldn't push myself because my chest was still tight and my breathing was still fast and shallow and my heart rate was still tachycardic.

Basically, for those of you who don't realise how serious Asthma can be, there was already a chance I could be ending the night in hospital myself if I made it that far. So I had to take the rest of the walk very steadily in the hope our little stop had not put our friends in further danger.

'Hang on' Charlie said as we were about to get walking, 'wasn't there someone else?'

Suddenly I remembered, screaming where's James.

My heart racing, we searched up and down about 50 meters of track where we had been sat, there were tears in my eyes as I shouted for James and I could hear Charlie calling for him, but then suddenly I heard nothing. I turned back up the tracks now looking for Charlie and shouting his name, but there was no sign of him at all. However, it could just have been that my eyesight was so bad.

Dave and Sarah's words were still ringing in my head as I called out for Charlie and for James. 'There are many people out there! Something big is going on! Everyone is alive for now!'

All I know is that Charlie would never leave me. Obviously, he's safe now as he wrote part of this book but at that moment, I was suddenly more alone than ever. I didn't know whether to go looking for them or turn back to the train where I wouldn't be alone but would have let down my friends.

Or should I keep going towards the town before whatever it was hiding in the dark came back for me. My sight was terrible and looking, either way, I could see the faint light of what I thought was the burning train, just a dot behind me and the lights of the town seemed no nearer to me than they had been before but that could have been because my eyes were so bad.

Tears were streaming down my face and my heart was pounding with fear. I thought it best to keep walking towards the town with my head down not looking either way not wanting to see what was there in the dark even with my sight impaired so I wouldn't see it anyway.

I had only been going minutes when I looked up ahead of me to my relief there were two figures with torches walking quickly towards me. Thank my lucky stars it must have been them coming back for me. I was all ready to slap and kiss the pair of them for leaving me there but as I put my arms out blindly and I grabbed the nearest person in a hug it was the shocked voice of Sadie who spoke.

'Jessie, how the hell did you get here?' Then I heard Mandy's voice say. 'What the actual fuck is going on?'

All sorts of things were going through my mind as to how on earth they came to be there and I am sure they were not expecting to see me either because both of them just stopped and gawped at me. Without thinking about the entire madness of the situation, the first words that came out of my mouth were 'Where's Sammy?'

'She went with another group' said a strange but familiar male voice, who went on to ask how on earth I managed to be there all alone when I went off the other way with Sophie and Jack.

'What? who's Sophie? 'I asked now so confused that I was not sure if the whole of this was some cruel dream. 'Jack, Amber, John, and Georgie are all missing remember?' I told them, adding that Becky and Jimmy were badly hurt and Kate was in labour and now Charlie and James were gone too.

'What are you on about' Mandy replied forcefully and what she said next made my blood run cold. 'The train derailed and exploded; you went for help in Yarmouth with Jack and Sophie, we came this way, Cathy, Greg, Mike, and Sammy went to search the marshes. Chris, Ben, Rachel and James went towards the road. That leaves Charlie, Rob, Sharon, John and Maggy missing.

'No that's wrong' I repeated 'There's nobody called Sophie in our group or Maggy! Jack, Amber, Georgie, John Charlie and James are missing. Becky and Jimmy are hurt and Kate is giving birth. How did you get here I repeated getting quite angry with Mandy for the first time ever in my life.

'What are you talking about Jessie' she replied, with more concern than anger, 'I don't know anyone called Amber Jimmy or Georgie, Sue is badly burned Becky is not hurt and Kate will not be giving birth anytime soon.'

'Who what where are you talking about?' I asked be-wilding as I heard Sadie burst into tears it was the male voice which spoke in a soft whisper.

'Becky and Kate are both dead.

I think my heart actually stopped beating for a long while. I couldn't believe it and grabbed the young man for support I thought I was going to faint. I caught my arm around his neck and he grabbed me by the shoulders calmly.

'Whoops you nearly took my head off'' he said gently.

Looking at him from close up I could see his face better but it was still blurry in the dark without my glasses. It had been one thing seeing the ghost of my long dead brother and sister in law to be while I was almost passed out.

But I was alert now and ghosts were not real, but they had to be because when I saw him I screamed harder than I have ever screamed in my life. The last time I saw that face was an hour or more ago looking up at me from a pool of blood from the floor of the train not attached to a body. I must have been dreaming; Tom could not be here when I had already watched him die.

Jessica's summery

So at this point, several people have had their say and written the first part of what happened to them. We have all been here together at the pub putting our story together. Even some of the people who haven't written their own piece are here to corroborate stories as it's not worth several people writing the same thing, Becky and Sharon are just two examples of many people here who have not written in this volume but may well continue the story in part 2. However, with all these people having a story to tell you can't write a long story all in one day, so that's why we've had to break it up into pieces given that we've all got homes to go to, jobs to do and kids to feed.

So having got this far I just want to summarise everything that we know so far in-case you have missed something or misunderstood.

Firstly, when the train derailed we counted everyone off apart from Jimmy who had tried to fight the flames and somehow managed to get himself out at the other end, however, he was badly burned.

Georgie, Amber, Jack and John, had all disappeared after getting off the train. Some people said they had seen John running back to the train and I certainly thought I saw somebody else on the train helping Jimmy as Charlie was screaming at me to get down.

Last we heard Amber had been dragged off into the dark by a terrifying monster, this was seen by Georgie who had given chase as well as she could with one leg all be it plastic, but she had fallen and knocked herself out.

Georgie herself has told how she had spoken to a young medium earlier that day, who had warned her she was in danger and that the key to her survival was Amber. That turned out to be Amber the person and not the colour of a key, It was Amber who saved Georgie's life when she was trapped and drowning in cold coffee. Georgie was now lying unconscious and unfound in the dark marsh.

Nobody had seen or heard from Jack.

Rob, Mike, Greg and Sharon had searched the marsh then tried to find the pub but got lost and then found the hankie/ pocket square that I gave to Amber and one of Georgie's false legs. Then they themselves were captured by some strange people in scary masks.

Mandy, Sadie, and Sammy had gone towards Acle where they were surprised to find a dying girl lying on the tracks and to their horror, it was Sammy herself (Yes I know it seems wrong and twisted). Then Sadie had been snatched from thin air.

Kate and Becky had stayed near the train with Jimmy who was badly burnt and Sue who was looking after them all. Kate was having huge contractions while the brake in Becky's leg was the most horrible injury I have seen in my whole life.

Chris, Ben, Cathy and Rachel searched the road side of the tracks where they found John's burnt body.

Charlie, James and I had gone towards Yarmouth where I had an asthma attack and saw the ghosts of my brother and his girlfriend and I kissed Charlie as you were just reading. Then on coming to our senses, we realised that James was missing. Then shortly after that Charlie vanished too leaving me alone until I somehow found myself facing Mandy and Sadie.

You may have missed these vital and worrying things.

1) Sammy saw herself die, which was not hard to miss.

2) After Sadie was taken that left Mandy with Sammy, but when I found her miles from where she should have been Mandy was with Sadie and Sammy was missing. That leaves the question as to who the people I found really were and how Toms' head had somehow found its way back onto his shoulders.

3) Chris found John's body, it was clearly him but at the same time, John came to Kate alive and shocked.

4) Rather than finding four missing people, we were now missing three more, Charlie James and Sadie.

Before I leave it here in the hope that you want to know the next part of our story I would like to explain that there was one more person on the train who was not part of our group. None of us knew she was there at the time and if I am honest we are all a little scared of her. Kind readers I would like to introduce to you, Jenny.

Jenny part 1

Hello, I am Jenny, you're now wracking your brains to remember where you heard Jessie mention Jenny on the train.

Well, she didn't, so now the mystery deepens until you reach back into your brain trying to think where you heard of me in this story, then suddenly you remember. If you haven't got it by now I'm the strange, creepy girl who told Georgie I could read her past.

The truth is I have always had this ability; I'm a medium far greater than Doris stokes or any of these people you see on TV, I will not judge them because even though a lot of them are frauds doing it for fame, they give people hope.

Hope is something I rarely get the chance to give people; I do what I can. Unfortunately, I'm not of the belief that my powers were given to me from God because they were not. My powers go far beyond talking to the dead.

I'm human, but I am not like any human you probably know. I suppose if you knew about my people you would call us warlocks, witches or even mutants.

I was born into a dark bloodline; it goes much deeper than I can explain, since the dawn of mankind my people have been hiding in shadows doing the work of Satan bringing death and destruction to the average man.

There were always very few of my people but they have been responsible for some of the most significant atrocities in the history of planet earth.

It's a long and complicated story but the basic outline of what I know is that at the beginning of humanity the force known to you as the devil saw the earth thriving. This displeased him or her and for some reason of deep jealousy, the devil created my people with the power to bring it crashing down and planted us among the human race to destroy it. However, the force which created the planet through millions of years of evolution, (known as God as well as many other names) wasn't happy and sent its own magical humanoids to defend the planet from my people.

As a good friend of mine called Sally once put it. "God and the devil were busy fighting each other and forgot about us". For thousands of years, my people fought a long-standing battle, with my people trying to destroy the planet and eradicate the defenders while they tried to get rid of us.

The battle came to the attention of mankind in the 1600's with all sorts of people being accused of witchcraft and killed in the cruellest of ways for the most stupid of reasons. Only 2 of those killed were real witches, two sisters in a small Norfolk village. They were the last of the defenders; their death should have paved the way for my people to take the world into our own hands and destroy it all.

That however did not happen obviously because we are all still here. The last act of those dying ladies was to do something that prevented our magic from directly killing anyone. With our powers unable to do what we were given them for, my people retreated into the shadows where we stayed until such time, when something could be done to break the spell.

In hiding they couldn't kill people outright, my people used their magic to make the human race inflict death upon itself. A few of the more recent things include two world wars, multiple terrorist attacks including 9/11 in New York and the 7/7 attacks in London. All terrorist organisations Isis, al qaeda, the British and US governments to name just a few, and much more all have my people behind them. Obviously, those things hadn't happened yet but my people continue to do these things to this day.

Getting rid of people with disabilities by cutting their benefits and forcing them to kill themselves while using the money they saved to drop bombs on other countries. Well, I might have liked that idea if I was on their side.

Of course, in life we make choices and they affect your life and the lives of those around us, but there are some things we cannot choose, like to whom you are born. I was born what I was, and my abilities were seen as 'special' even to my kind.

So, you might ask yourself, if I'm so bad, if I really am evil, why am I exposing it and how come Jessie and Mandy and the rest of these lovely people have let me tell my story in their book? Well for one nobody will take me seriously, but the main reason is that although I can't choose not to have my evil instincts I can choose not to act on them.

My powers are so strong that the voices of the dead reached me before I could talk, but they were not the voices of my people, they were the voices of good witches who helped me to make my choice not to act on my evil instincts.

Think of me as a vampire who refuses to drink blood, or a werewolf who locks themselves in a cage before the full moon. My parents thought I was what they call a null, a person born into a family of warlocks who has no magic. I was hidden away from the world, a forgotten child. You'll find no record of me on any birth certificate or schooling, which meant no social life and no friends, I was just a slave to my family or so they thought.

While my family slept, I would walk the streets of the town, some nights I would break into the pleasure beach and climb to the top of the roller coaster and listen to the voices of the townsfolk in my head. What I hear is not just the voices that come from the mouth but those that come from the soul. That's how I felt Georgie coming that night; it was not just her.

I heard Jess worrying about her staff, always wanting the best for them, Kate and John radiated love and that poor girl Amber with the pain in her heart and the desire to kill herself. All of them were visitors to my town and their voices stood out among the usual voices in my head.

I felt I knew these people and I knew they were in danger, that's why I told Georgie to go straight home. Georgie however didn't listen and I don't blame her. She would look very strange telling everyone to go home early because some crazy girl told them they were in danger.

If you remember Jessie said in the prologue that she could hear somebody sneezing behind them. There was something following them, something dangerous and frightening lurking in the dark.

It was me, just like the rest of the ladies who are writing I had a horrible cold, but the main difference was that I knew why everyone was ill.

My people were doing something out on the marsh that black night. I heard whispers, not just people talking but thoughts in their heads, talk of awful things such as raising the devil himself. I didn't believe they really had the power to do that, but in any case, it was scary stuff. It was a potion they were creating for their get together on the marsh that night; it was the fumes that were making people ill. For an unknown reason, it was only females who were getting ill from it.

The potion was being made all over town; it was being made in different homes where my people lived including my nanna's. That was how all of the ladies working for J&M, got ill having been in a lot of houses that afternoon. Symptoms were very similar to the flu or a very heavy cold; many people had colds because it was winter, so the effects of the potion were being masked.

So shortly after my meeting with Georgie, I told my Nanna I was off to bed. Rather than go to sleep I locked the door and jumped out of the bedroom window. This didn't hurt half as much as you might think because between you and me I can fly. Flying is not something you should do in front of everyday people if you don't want yourself to be exposed.

So I followed on foot, watching the guys and girls as they went about their work and then I followed Jessie and Mandy as they made their way to the train.

As I say I didn't know the plans and I thought talk of raising the devil was just talking. I just wanted to make sure that these innocent people got home safely. So, after following them in the shadows, I sat and watched them for a while as they waited for the train.

The more I watched them, the more I realised how much I craved to be normal, these people were all friends, for the most part, they had no ill feelings toward each other. They helped each other and shared things like food drink and cigarettes, they looked after each other like a big family and here was me on the outside looking in wanting to be part of it all.

I could feel pain radiating from Amber as she sat sobbing at the end of the platform, I wanted to go and tell her that everything was going to be okay, but much I thought I knew her she did not know me at all. I was glad when Jess found her there and got her to calm down.

I could also hear Georgie wondering loudly in her own mind about things I told her as she sat with the others not really listening to a word they said but doing an excellent job of pretending.

When the roaring diesel burning monster of a train rattled out of the darkness I watched as they all got on to the front of the two carriages. When they were all aboard, I shot like a flash out of the shadows and took my place behind Jessie. What Sharon saw thinking she was drunk, was the flash of me zooming across the platform to the train.

I'd never been on a train before, so it was all new to me. In fact, this was the first time in my whole life I'd gone outside of Great Yarmouth. I sat there listening in to all of the voices in my head coming from all of the people on board.

All I had wanted to do was make sure these people got back to Norwich safely; I planned to return to Yarmouth with the train on the next service. There was no plan for me to show myself to anyone there, I just wanted to make sure they were safe as the train passed buy whatever horrible shit my people were up to on the marsh.

At the same time, I hoped I might hear some of the voices in my head telling me what exactly it was that my people were really doing out there. As I have said, it was very unlikely that they were actually going to raise Satan. However, if my powers could be of any use to keep the train safe I wanted to be there to do what I could.

I was not expecting a number of voices in my head to increase in the way it did. There were suddenly thousands of people talking all at once, not talking with their mouths, but with their hearts and souls, these were not the dead who often contacted me, these were the people out on the marsh. This was much bigger than I expected, there must have been enough people out there hiding in the dark to fill Wembley stadium.

My head was screaming when the bump came all of a sudden, In the darkness, I could hear cries vocally in my ears drowned out the many voices in my head. I laid on the floor unseen by the other people as I tried desperately to disconnect my psychic link to the people outside the train. By the time, I really came out of the trance I found myself almost alone most people had left the train and it was already burning.

I could see Jessica stood at one end of the train looking down the aisle with Charlie pulling at her to get off. At the other end, I saw Jimmy with a fire extinguisher trying in vain to put out the flames. An average person's instinct would have been to run for the exit, I however as I've said am not a regular person and being fireproof is one of my many powers. So my instinct was to run through the flames surrounding Jim and get him out.

When Jess shouted to Charlie that she could see somebody in the flames it was me. When I got to Jimmy he was already on fire, as I grabbed him and dragged him towards the far exit engulfed in flames I felt a strong voice in my head.

'You're not meant to save him' it said loudly and clearly.

I ignored it, no voice in my head tells me who I can or can't save, I might have been born bad but I do not let people die.

'Let him die' it repeated clearly.

I continued towards the door, which opened for me with just a touch of my hand. As I lowered him on the step I saw pain and fear in the old man's eyes as he dropped and at that moment I knew I'd done wrong. It was his soul that spoke to me as he rolled and it said hauntingly. 'It was my time, you've robbed me of my death.'

I was still stood there in a moment of shock and realisation that he had intended to die, that the train exploded and took me with it.

I think you might be wondering how on earth I am still alive to tell the tale.

There is one problem regarding me pretending to my own people that I don't have magic. If you don't have powers but you know about them they become a closed door. A person who doesn't have powers but knows about their existence cannot be allowed to tell the wider community about it. For this reason, people born without magic a not allowed to know any details about how to use it. If this was Harry Potter, for example, a person born to a wizarding family who was not a wizard, would not be allowed to go to Hogwarts. Remember as I told you, my people are the bad guys and that is why I choose to hide my abilities from them. So, after not being taught anything about my powers I had to teach myself things when I could. Most of it came from using my extraordinary hearing to eavesdrop on lessons from afar, but I far from knew it all.

So, when the train blew up that was the end of me right? Well obviously, not because I am here writing this without so much as a scratch on me. Well apparently, I can't die, at least not in that way. I was blown what must have been about 50 feet into the air and fell to the ground with a thud and searing pain like I had never felt. I remember landing on the tracks and seeing blood pouring out of me, my right leg was gone and so was my left arm and there were fleshy balloon-like things hanging out of my chest, I soon realised they were my lungs.

Surely I was a goner, all I had to do was stay there and wait for the devil's minions to drag me off to hell where all my people go. (They don't let my people into heaven) I'd never been so scared; I was a traitor to my people many of whom would be welcomed in hell as

dark angels but not me, I was going to burn forever.

I remember everything going black as though I was asleep, but then woke up as though it had all been a dream. There was no pain, my arms and legs were reattached, and my lungs were back in my chest where they belonged.

I thought it was all a dream and that I had woken in my bed. However, unless my bedroom was on a railway track and the rails were my bed, which apparently was not the case, then it was all true and my powers had put my broken body back together.

For a moment, I just laid there dazed with the noise all going on around me. I looked to my right and I saw what was left of the train burning, the roof and windows were gone and there were seats scattered around it also burning and melted. The smell of burning plastic metal and oil filled my lungs causing me to choke.

My first instinct was to fly away (Just because I can fly) I will add that I didn't want people to find out about the extent of my powers then and that's why I didn't just fly straight to the town to get help.

You might think "why expose my powers in a book while not using them to help people?". The reason is that I feel it's okay to write about my powers while not using them to help people is this. If I write about them while using a false name, you can't trace me and you can choose to believe me or dismiss the whole story as fantasy. If however I was seen using my powers, for example, reporting the crash 2 seconds after it happened by flying to the town I would be exposed captured locked up and taken for testing.

When I lifted off into the air to get a better look, it was in the cover of smoke. Looking down I saw not one but two trains burning either side of the single line one on my left and one much further along to my right on the opposite side of the track. How could it be that two trains were travelling on the single line? Had they collided head-on and then somehow spun away from the track in different directions either side of the embanked track? No! They were too far away from each other for that to happen.

My first thought was anger and how on earth the railway company could have let two trains onto the single track I did not know. My limited knowledge of how railways work told me that trains using a single-track line should be held in sidings and passing places to let each other passed. The service from Norwich should have crossed our train many miles further up the line and there was no service scheduled for earlier. It was unlikely that it was a charter train for a private party and even so it would still have been held, so the question remained, what the hell was two trains doing on the track and how was I still alive. However, as I say the trains were too far apart to have hit each other.

Strangely after I'd been there a few minutes, I started to see people from both trains organising search and rescue parties. However, it seemed that somehow over a few minutes the trains somehow seemed to have got even further apart.

I couldn't see the road below me at all, in fact, it seemed to have gone altogether. On both sides of the track, I could see hundreds of tents pitched far enough away to not be seen from the train. There were lots of other things out there but I couldn't see what they were without light but it all looked terrifying. The layout of land below was almost as though there was a symmetrical pattern as though somebody had cut up two maps down the line of the railway then stuck the two halves together the opposite way around.

However, all these things were put to the back of my mind when I looked straight ahead and saw something that made my blood run cold. Hovering way above the earth brushing herself down and cackling with a cruel smile beaming over her face as she looked at the chaos and destruction all around was someone I knew all too well. It was a person I saw an image of every day but who couldn't possibly be flying above those train wrecks. There was only one type of place I'd ever seen that person and the reason she should not have been there is that that place was the bathroom mirror.

I had just come face to face with myself only for me to find that my other self clearly did not share my views on using her powers for evil and by the look on her face, as she flew at me, she had been expecting me.

I had only heard of such things in old folk tales that I overheard my people telling each other when an act of great evil caused a rift in time and space in which 2 or more dimensions collide with each other causing people to cross into each other's worlds. Something had shaken the very fabric of reality. One thing was for sure. Not only those of us on the marsh that night but everyone in the world was in deep deep shit.

Continued in after the derailment volume 2 the vale of darkness hides many things.

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