- Dr. Jibran, welcome
to Let the Quran Speak.
- Thank you, good to be here.
- Now, last time we talked about
how do you talk to your kids about drugs?
And now the question is well, what about
if you find out that your
child is using drugs?
What do you do?
You now, what's your next step beyond
the shock that you might have?
- Beyond the shock?
And then the first thing beyond the shock
especially with the
shock practice patience.
Don't act harshly or in a
rash manner in that instance
because that's the time to build
that therapeutic relationship
and you know your child
better than anybody else.
And so begin those conversations and begin
to understand what the level of use is.
You know, there's a substance
used happens on a spectrum.
There's even some
beneficial use, for example,
in the context of some spiritual practices
that are like the use
of psilocybin or LSD.
And then it goes all the
way to problematic substance
use where it becomes problematic.
And so the first thing
that you do is assess
where they sort of lie on that spectrum.
- I guess for a Muslim
parent it would be like
anywhere on the spectrum is probably.
- Only that, yeah.
And that's where we really
need to, you know, relax
and not break that therapeutic
relationship immediately
and instead work on it
and even use the examples
from the life of the
prophet peace be upon him.
And so firstly you begin forming
that therapeutic
relationship to understand
where their uses are.
And obviously there's
going to be under reporting
from the child to the parent.
- Yeah they might be hiding.
- They might be hiding or
they might tell you that,
oh, this is the first time
and I've never done it before.
And I promise I'll never do it again.
- So what are the signs?
Like how could you tell
that it's really serious?
- So that adolescents are great
at hiding things from
their parents, right?
But for example with
cannabis, there might be
some motivation or where
they're less motivated
to do things or like the
munchies that we talked about.
So there are some of those signs depending
on the drug those signs will differ.
But if you find empty
pods around the house
or in your garbage that
came from a vaping device
that might be a telltale sign as well.
So they'll differ depending
on what the substance is.
But the neck, once you've had a chance
to establish that, seek professional help.
And so starting with your
primary care practitioner
but also you can move
towards, you know, counseling
and therapy or even pharmacological help
depending on what the substance is.
Yes, while we have a difficult time
treating adolescent substance
use a lot of the approaches
that work in adults also
work in adolescents.
And so a professional would
be able to help you with that.
But going back to that
point about reacting.
I think when other examples from the life
of the prophet peace be upon
him that is really pertinent
here is that while Islam
did a really good job
of prohibition of alcoholic, you know.
Compare that to prohibition
of alcohol in the US
when the moonshiners and the
poles and all of that was
what happened and prohibition
didn't actually work.
Prohibition worked at the
time of the prophet Al-Yasa,
a prophet peace be upon him.
And it worked because of the things
that we were talking about earlier.
But even though that was the
case at the population level
and that was to reduce the potential harms
that come with, you know, a
whole population using alcohol
at the individual level the
prophet peace be upon him
showed compassion to
those struggling with it.
And so we have at least
two different instances
of somebody being brought
back to the prophet
peace be upon him over and over again
because of their alcohol
drinking to be punished.
And then people around
them cursing this person
and the prophet in both cases
telling them not to curse
this person in one case
saying that, you know,
don't help your brother don't help
the devil against your brother.
And in another instance
saying that I know for sure
that this person loves the law
and loves the prophet, loves
God and loves the prophet.
And so I'm vouching for
that person and also
showing compassion and
understanding that one
of the characteristics of addiction is
that it's a chronic relapsing
disorder where you try
to stay clean, you try
to stay off the drug
and then you fall right back in.
And that cycle is what is
the cycle of addiction is
where you're going from the
euphoria to going to then having
the withdrawal symptoms
and then the craving.
And then you go back right
into the substance use.
- Do you think there's hope in terms
of moving beyond that cycle?
- Should be there is.
And especially as Muslims,
there's always hope, right?
Like do not despair in the mercy of God.
And that's why we don't
despair but understand
that that is also a nature of the problem.
And so deal with it accordingly.
And the thing that we need is compassion,
especially when it comes
to your own children.
Like what the, unfortunately
sometimes what happens
is we take this hardly ourselves
and it's almost a slight
against our own egos.
And then that makes us act out harshly.
And there goes any chance
of recovery for both you,
your child and your relationship.
And so this is where the prophetic example
is a beautiful one.
And to not just him
showing compassion himself
but showing everybody around him
that there is a need for compassion there.
And so don't, our society
especially the Muslim society
also stigmatizes substance use a lot.
And so we should also check
ourselves is our reaction coming
from how we actually feel about it
or what are people going to say?
And so that's the other angle of it.
And so again, look at how
the prophet peace be upon him
dealt with it and show that compassion,
because that's going to be that
first step towards recovery.
- Dr. Jibran can you talk a
little bit about mental health
because do you think parents need
to consider the mental
health of their children
who might be using drugs?
- Yes, this is something
we study in the lab
is the co-occurrence of
substance use and mental health.
The rates of substance use regardless
of what the specific
mental health diagnosis
is from schizophrenia to
bipolar disorder to depression
are anywhere between
three to 10 times higher
in these populations
compared to the general.
- Wow.
- And there are all sorts of hypotheses
that have been put out.
The self-medication hypothesis is probably
the most prevalent one where
the drugs are being used
to medicate or to treat some portion
of the mental illness that
the jury is still out on.
What the true nature of
the chicken or this chicken
or egg question is, but there is
a big relationship between the two.
And more often than not substance use
actually worsens the
course of the disease.
So schizophrenia, depression,
bipolar substance use worsens that course.
So it isn't just like
we're having conversations
with our children about substance use.
We should also be mindful of
their mental state as well
and have those conversations as well.
Just like we were talking
about stigmatization
of substance use for
mental illness is probably
even more so stigmatized in the community.
And so look for, educate
yourselves on the signs for,
you know, once again, sleep
for example is one important
and almost a telltale sign when it comes
to different mental illnesses.
Sleep is disrupted in
everything from bipolar disorder
to depression, to schizophrenia, disrupted
in different ways.
So in bipolar disorder
a person may not sleep,
whereas in depression they might not
be able to get out of bed.
So those are signs that you can look for
and help and speak to your children.
And once again start early, speak often
once you see changes
happening then intervene
and continue to be present.
And I think that's going to probably be
the most important lesson out
of all of this is the need
for presence and for us
to be present in the lives
of our children and to be
noticing changes that might happen
and to help them along the path
because with mental illness
for example, insight is already an issue
even in adult patients
with mental illness.
They have very little
insight on their condition.
And so as an adolescent who
doesn't generally have insight
into their existence
already, that's even harder.
And so we need to provide or help be
their mirror in that sense.
And then say that I'm
noticing change in your sleep.
Are you feeling okay?
Are you and or if we see them be anxious,
if we see sharp shifts in
their mood from being happy
to being sad or excessively sad.
Those are the things that
we should all be noticing
and having conversations about.
- Dr. Jibran, thank you
for sharing those insights.
I really appreciate it.
