Muffin

House of Assignation Series

(Part 1)

By

Kimmie Thomas

Muffin

House of Assignation Series (Part 1)

This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real people, living or dead, actual events, establishments, organizations, and/or locales are intended to give the fiction a sense of reality and authenticity. Other names, characters, places and incidents are either products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, as are those fictionalized events and incidents that involve real persons and did not occur or are set in the past or the future.

Published by:

Tomcat Publishing

Detroit, Michigan 48221

All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever.

Printed in the United States of America .

"Absolutely no one can screw you over quite as well as members of your own family."

Chapter 1

Muffin

At seventeen, I was all alone in the world.

Right before my seventeenth birthday, my grandmother died. She raised me after my mother went to jail for armed robbery. My father died years earlier in a car accident when I was five.

The only stable person in my life was my grandmother, Caroline Waters.

Nana, which is what I called my grandmother, was my world.

The day after my grandmother's funeral, my mother's youngest brother showed up at my grandmother's small bungalow on Detroit's Westside with a duffle bag and told me he was moving in to help take care of me. I knew that it was going to be a bad setup, but my aunt Mattie assured me that she would keep an eye on my uncle and me.

The arrangement worked out for a while. Then the shut-off notices for the lights and gas arrived in the mail. My unemployed uncle had drunk up the little bit of insurance money that was left from the ten-thousand-dollar life insurance policy.

My only other option was Aunt Mattie, my grandmother's sister. I told her that I wanted to stay with her after Nana died, but she was in her seventies and lived in a senior apartment building. Her building didn't allow relatives living with her under any circumstances, so my only choice was to stay where I was—with my uncle Pumpkin.

Most mornings when I opened the refrigerator, there was nothing in there to eat. In fact, the day I met the man who would change my life, the only things in the refrigerator were a jar of sweet relish, a can of beer, and some mayonnaise. All I could do was drop my head and say a prayer. I asked God to please send me some help. I was smart enough to realize that help wasn't coming right away, so I closed the refrigerator, grabbed my book bag, and headed out the door to school. If I got to school early enough, I could get something to eat for free through the free lunch program.

Before I went to bed the night before, I told my uncle I was hungry. He stared at me blankly and said, "What do you want me to do about it? I guess you need to get a job or something."

I woke up that morning thinking about what he had said to me about a job. My grandmother had insisted that I focus on school and refused to let me get a job, but a job would help fix some of the problems that I faced.

In the winter months, I always dressed in layers. I kept in mind that you never knew what kind of weather you were going to face in Detroit. If I dressed in layers, I could always take something off if it was warmer than I expected.

It was cold and snowing outside, so my layering technique kept me warm that day as I walked to the bus stop. I prayed the bus would be on time. If I was late for breakfast, the other kids would eat or take whatever was left. Another reason I was getting to school early that day was so I could take some food home with me. Knowing my uncle like I did, there still wasn't going to be any groceries in the house when I got there.

As I walked down Grand River Road, I could feel eyes watching me. I was used to people looking at me strangely. The strange looks started when I was about twelve. Men stared at me, not because I wore tight clothes or anything, it was because of what Nana called my too-too. My butt stuck out no matter what I wore because I had a small waist and bow hips. Nana had raised me right, and even though she had died, I was determined to behave the way I thought she would have wanted me to. So, I continued to dress as decently as I could. I always wore a long top when I wore pants, especially when I wore blue jeans or fitted pants. It didn't stop the guys from cat calling at me from their cars though.

Once I reached the bus stop, I rocked back and forth, trying to stay warm. I tried to think happy thoughts, like how much fun I was going to have once I got to college. When I graduated from high school, I planned to get the hell out of my grandmother's house. My counselor had already told me I would qualify for financial aid, so I knew I would be able to pay for college. I just needed to keep my grades up.

My thoughts were interrupted by someone yelling at me.

"Hey, little momma," the voice said.

A silver BMW with tinted windows pulled up in front of me. The passenger window was down, allowing the already booming sound system to spill out of the car. The driver leaned over and smiled at me with a mouth full of pearly white teeth.

"I know you hear this a lot, but can I please give you a ride? A babe fine as you shouldn't be out in the cold," the man said to me.

As usual, the bus was late, and an hour had already passed since I had arrived at the bus stop. Even with two pairs of socks and an extra sweater, I was still freezing. My home training and my hood upbringing told me it wasn't safe to get in a car with a man I didn't know, no matter how cold I was. Plus, it was all over the news about women in the area being abducted and killed by a serial killer.

"Thank you for the offer, but my bus will be here in a minute," I told him.

"Come on, baby girl, I'm not going to hurt you. Plus, it's cold out here, and you're too cute to be standing out here by yourself. I would hate for something to happen to you before I got a chance to get to know you."

"Thank you, but I'm all right. The bus will be here shortly." I backed up when I realized he could reach his hand out of the window and grab me.

"How about this? I'll pay for a cab to take you wherever you're going. Will you let me do that for you, pretty girl?"

I looked up and down the street, hoping to see the bus coming, but before I could answer, he opened his door and got out of the car. He reached me in three long strides. Gripped by fear, I stumbled backwards and fell into the freshly fallen snow. My brain was screaming at me to get up and run, but my legs were ignoring my commands.

"Relax, I'm not going to hurt you," the man said, extending his hand to help me up.

I looked at his hand, trying to decide if he would hurt me or not. The cold snow helped me make my decision. Reluctantly, I took his hand and clumsily got to my feet.

"Are you all right?" the man asked.

"Yes, I'm okay," I replied.

"You don't have to be afraid of me, but I understand. This is the D." He still smiled at me.

I was mesmerized. From inside his car, I couldn't really get a good look at the guy. But once he stepped out of his car, my mind was blown. Oh my God, he was fine. He was tall, at least six feet. He had a beautiful smile with coal black eyes that seemed to see straight through to my soul. His dark brown skin was smooth, enhancing the appearance of his neatly trimmed mustache and beard, making him look powerful. Without thinking, I looked away and giggled childishly.

Men had offered me rides before, but they were usually old and ugly, or they gave off the weirdo vibe. This man was clean cut and dressed fly in a leather bomber jacket with a fresh pair of red dragon jeans and brown Timberland boots.

"What school do you go to?" he asked, looking at my book bag.

"Redford High," I told him.

"What grade are you in?"

I hesitated, trying to think of how to answer him. Even though I was a senior, I wouldn't be eighteen until June of next year. I was sure that if he knew I was under aged he wouldn't be interested in me. But what was I going to do with a grown man anyway? My grandmother would kill me if she caught me with a guy his age. Like a brick, it hit me—my Nana was gone. She had left me to deal with everything on my own, but dead or alive, I wouldn't want to disappoint her.

I looked up into the man's face, and our eyes met. I tried to make my mouth open and my lips move, but nothing came out.

"That's cool, ma. Let me get you that cab so you won't be late for school," he told me with a smile.

His eyes said he understood. Suddenly, I felt warm inside.

He turned and looked both ways, up and down Grand River Road. The man walked toward his car and began to wave at an approaching yellow cab. The cab stopped in the middle of the street, and the cabbie rolled down his window.

"Where are you headed?" the cabbie asked.

"Redford High School," the man said.

"All right," the cabbie replied.

"Come on, baby girl," the man said, waving me over to the cab.

On shaky legs, I walked toward the cab. When I reached the man, I turned and faced him.

"I don't have any money," I said.

"I told you I was going to get you to wherever you were going. I got this, ma," he replied.

"Why are you doing this? You don't know me, and I can't pay you back."

"Don't worry about it. Just do your best when you get to school."

Reluctantly, I got into the cab. Before he closed the door, he leaned in close to my face and said, "What's your name?"

"My name is Michelle, but everyone calls me Muffin," I replied with a giggle.

With a sexy smile plastered on his face, he closed the door. He reached in the front passenger side window and gave the driver a fifty-dollar bill. He stepped back and banged on the car door to let the driver know to take off.

As the cab cruised down Grand River Road, I realized that I didn't even know his name. How stupid could I be? But what difference did it make? After I had giggled like a little girl, it was obvious I was an under aged chick. A dude like him wasn't interested in someone like me anyway.

I leaned my head back against the seat and closed my eyes, trying to forget my empty stomach. The only thing I could find to eat the night before was a can of potted meat and some oyster crackers. I had money hidden away, but if my uncle had known about it, he would have taken it from me. Plus, I would have had to sneak back out to buy something because my uncle insisted that I came straight home after school. I thought about saying I needed to go to the library to do my homework, but he wouldn't have believed me. It also didn't help that in Detroit it got dark at six p.m. in October.

I hated to admit it, but Pumpkin was right; I needed to get a job if I was going to continue to live decently in the small house on Winthrop Street or for that matter have enough money to move when the time came to leave.

Chapter 2

Muffin

When school let out, I walked across the busy four lane road to get to McNichols Road. I had thought up a story to tell my uncle when I got home to explain how late it was when I arrived. There were numerous fast food restaurants on McNichols, and if I got lucky and was hired, I wouldn't be that far from home. I hadn't decided how I was going to hide getting a job from my uncle, but I was mentally working on it.

By the time I got home, it was seven-fifteen in the evening. Even though I knew Pumpkin didn't really care about me, I knew he would still give me a hard time about the time of night I was coming in.

To my surprise, the house was dark and quiet when I opened the side door that led to the kitchen. Tired from walking to several different restaurants filling out applications, I hung up my coat on the hook by the back door and retrieved my back pack from the floor where I had dropped it and headed for the kitchen. I flipped the light switch on in the kitchen and stumbled backwards when I saw my uncle sitting in a kitchen chair with a belt in his hand.

"Hi, Uncle Pumpkin, what's up?" I said, looking nervously at the belt he held. Pumpkin had never hit me before, but as the money began to run out, he became meaner and meaner. He began yelling at me for small things like not replacing toilet paper in the bathroom, even when he knew that we were all out. I could have bought some toilet paper at the dollar store, but then he would want to know where I got the money from.

"You think I'm stupid, don't you, Muffin?" he began. "Every night you come home later and later. When you do come straight home from school, you try to get back out. I should have known that your fast ass would go boy crazy as soon as my mama died. It's hard enough to keep up with you, but I'll be damned if you think you're going to bring home a baby."

Fear gripped me when he stood and tightened his hands around the leather belt.

My grandmother never hit or spanked me, so I wasn't used to being hit. My mind was racing a hundred miles a second, trying to think of something to say so that he wouldn't hit me with the belt. I had intended to keep my job search a secret, but I didn't want my uncle beating on me either. My seventeen-year-old mind quickly reasoned that if I told him about my job search he would understand since it was his suggestion that I find a job in the first place.

"I haven't been with a boy or anything. I went looking for a job. Remember yesterday you told me I needed to find one," I told him.

I slung my book bag on the floor and pulled out the business card the manager at Burger King gave me and held it out for him to see.

Without warning, the belt whipped through the air and struck me on my back and left shoulder. The sting of it caught me off guard, causing me to fall back against the sink. When I saw his arm go up again, I threw my hands up to block the next blow. When the belt struck my arm, a large welt rose on my skin.

"I don't give a fuck where you went. You better have your ass in my house before it gets dark. Do you hear me?" Pumpkin said angrily.

"Yes, I hear you," I said in a trembling voice.

"When you start working, I want a copy of the schedule and every dime you make is to go on bills around here, too. Your days of staying in my house for free are over."

I only needed to make it until August. Then I would be on my way to college, and my uncle wouldn't be able to keep telling me how lucky I was that he was willing to let me stay in his mother's house nor would he be able to beat on me.

I wanted to remind him that since my mother wasn't dead, she was part owner, too, which gave me a right to stay there as well. I kept my thoughts to myself though because it would only make things worse.

I really didn't know my uncle, and all I wanted was for us to get along with each other long enough for me to finish high school, and then I would be out of there.

I hadn't seen much of my uncle while I was growing up. When Nana was alive, he would stop by and borrow money from her, but he never interacted with me. In fact, he usually ignored me. Even when I would say hello, he would turn his head and act like he didn't hear or see me. I had never done anything to him, but he just seemed to not like me. That's why I was surprised and suspicious when he offered to look after me when Nana died.

He acted like he was so fond of me when Aunt Mattie or any other family members were around, but as soon as they left, he cursed at me and told me to take my ass somewhere.

I knew Pumpkin was a no good drunk because Nana told me herself, which was why I never told him that I received a social security check from my father's death. When Nana died, I knew right away that I was going to need "mad money." Mad money was what Nana called the money every woman should have saved just in case she got mad and wanted to leave. It was obvious to me that I could only put up with my uncle for so long before I was going to get mad and want to leave.

Aunt Mattie knew it, too, and she agreed with my idea to not tell Pumpkin about my social security check. My check was only three hundred and eighty-two dollars a month, and I was saving as much of it as I could for college expenses. I only spent small amounts on food and toiletries when necessary.

Two weeks earlier, I found a stack of mail thrown on the side of the couch. I took all of it upstairs to my room and sorted it all out even though some of it was wet from a wasted beer. I found notices from the light and gas company that my uncle hadn't paid since he had arrived. The last payment the utility company received was three months prior when I paid them with the money I got from donations at Nana's funeral. The only reason I paid the bill then was because Pumpkin said he would give me back the money if I did. I waited two weeks and then asked him for my money. He started cursing at me and telling me that if I asked him again I could get out of his house. It wouldn't be long before the utilities would be shut off, and I still wouldn't have anywhere to live.

It was obvious I wasn't going to make it until the school year was over.

I watched Uncle Pumpkin walk out of the kitchen with a cocky swagger. I could tell he was proud of himself. If I had any doubts he cared about me, they had all just been removed.

I gathered my things and headed to my room. I needed to sit still and figure out what my next move was going to be.

Chapter 3

Pumpkin

I hated that I had to show my dark side to my niece, but she had had it too easy anyway. My mother had treated her better than she had ever treated me or my sister. I really didn't care if she came home or not, but two days before, while Muffin was in school, Aunt Mattie had come by. She knew the money my mother had in the bank and the little bit that was left over from the insurance policy wouldn't last long. She had brought by a few groceries and left me a hundred dollars to add to the bills. She then proceeded to curse me out and call me a low life after she opened the refrigerator and found no food in it.

I lied to her, telling her that I was out all week looking for a job, but nobody was hiring. She stormed out of the house, cursing and calling me names. When she got in her car, she rolled down the window and yelled, "I'll be back on Friday, and there better be some groceries in the refrigerator."

The next day would be Friday, and there was even less in the refrigerator than there was on Monday.

Being a hustler, I planned to get up the next morning and go to the food bank over on Greenfield and get a couple of bags of groceries for free.

I was glad that the little bitch was looking for a job, but it wouldn't help the situation at that moment. It would probably take three to four weeks before she got a check. By then the lights and gas would probably be turned off. I had planned to be out of there when that happened.

The fact that I had to take care of Muffin's spoiled ass really pissed me off. My mother took her in when my sister went to jail but wouldn't let me live there just because I didn't have a job. That wasn't fair; after all, I was her first born. My mother was always helping people at the church and in the neighborhood, but she would only give me five to ten dollars here and there or a plate of food from time to time. When she died, I saw my chance to get what I deserved.

Initially, I had planned on kicking Muffin's big ass out, but after I checked at the City County building, I discovered that my mother had left a will. In the will, she left all her possessions to Muffin. Now ain't that some shit. I was her only son, and she left everything to her granddaughter.

Her whole estate consisted of nine hundred and forty-one dollars in my mother's bank account and the three-bedroom house on Winthrop. I hadn't even tried to get the nine hundred dollars out of the bank because then I would have to go through probate court, and then everyone would know the house was left to Muffin. So, I changed my plans and decided I would live for free as long as I could.

The insurance listed me and Muffin as beneficiaries on the policy. After the funeral was paid for, the remaining balance came in two separate checks. My aunt took Muffin to the bank and made her open up an account to deposit it in. I had thought about telling Muffin we needed some of the money she had in the bank to pay bills around the house, but if Aunt Mattie found out, she might start really checking into everything and then I would be ass out anyway.

Muffin used some of the money that people had given her in envelopes when my mother died to pay the utility bills three months prior. After that, she started asking me for her money back and asking what we were going to do about the gas and light bills. I told her that I would handle it, but all the money was gone, and I had no plans of getting a job and taking care of her spoiled ass. The only thing I could think of was packing what little I had and move on.

I only beat her ass because she needed to know I wasn't to be messed with. The house may belong to Muffin, but she wasn't going to be able to keep it.

Even with a job, Muffin might have been able to pay the utilities, but she would lose the house eventually. The property tax bill would be coming shortly, and it was her responsibility to pay it since the house was left to her.

I was still coming out on top. I was living in my mother's house for free. When I left would depend on what happened first, the lights and gas being cut off or the tax man asking for his money.

As I walked out of the kitchen, I turned and look back at Muffin holding her arm. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked at me. A chill went down my spine when I saw the look of pure hatred on her face.

I may have shown her who was in charge, but her facial expression reminded me too much of my mother. That look told me I needed to be careful of how hard I slept at night.

Chapter 4

Muffin

After the beating my uncle gave me, I was determined to get a job, save some money, and move into an apartment when I graduated. I just needed to handle my business and stay out of his way.

I thought about calling my aunt and letting her know what went down, but what good would that do. She didn't have anywhere for me to stay if Uncle Pumpkin put me out.

My best friend Jazmine had offered to let me stay at her house, but I was uncomfortable with that idea. Jazmine's mother was a nurse at Sinai Hospital, and they lived in the prestigious Rosedale Park area. Her mother bought her anything she wanted, and she could do whatever she liked. From the outside looking in, Jazmine's home life seemed worlds above mine, but Jazz missed a lot of school and her grades were horrible. If I moved in with Jazz, she would get mad when I chose to go to school rather than hang out with her. I liked school, and I had plans for my future. Jazz had no plans to go to college. She was looking for a cute guy with some money to take care of her.

The most important part of my plan was going away to college. Staying at Jazz's house would make it too hard to stay focused on my school work. I intended to go to college and start my own business once I finished my business degree. Even though my uncle was mean, I still thought I had a better chance with him.

I could only pray that Pumpkin hitting me wouldn't happen again, but my gut told me that he enjoyed hitting me and would be waiting for a chance to do it again. I would just have to make sure I stayed out of his way. My main goal was to make sure he didn't find out about my social security check.

I had to hold on to the belief that my Nana was looking out for me, even in heaven. At that time, I was sure that between the Lord above and my Nana, I would make it.

The next day, my arm hurt and there was a large bruise from where my uncle had hit me. I wore a long sleeve shirt so no one would see the mark.

In third hour English class, my cell phone vibrated in my pocket, causing me to jump. I managed to silence the phone before anyone heard it, but I was gripped with pain when I bumped my arm on the desk. I looked around the crowded class room and prayed no one notice, especially Ms. Campbell, my English teacher. Thankfully, no one did.

When class was over, I grabbed my books and rushed to my locker, almost knocking over another student in the hallway. I opened my locker and grabbed my books for my next hour class. I speed walked to the girls' bathroom so that I could check my phone to see who called. Redford High School had a strict rule about using your phone in school, so I went into a stall and locked it before I checked my messages.

I felt weak in the knees when I heard the voice of the manager from McDonald's.

"Hello, this message is for Michelle Taylor. My name is Phillip Washington, the manager at McDonald's. I spoke with you yesterday and I would like to offer you a position here at McDonald's. If you are interested, please stop by today so that I can get you a uniform and put together a schedule for you. I will be here until five o'clock today."

"Muffin, where you at. I saw you run in here," Jazmine said just as I hit the end button on my phone.

"What's up?" I said as I stepped out of the bathroom stall.

"I just wanted to check on you, that's all. You sounded pretty bad when we got off the phone last night. I started to tell my mother what happened, but I know you didn't want anyone to know, so I didn't say anything, but that was some foul shit your uncle pulled on you. The offer is still open. You know you can come live with me if you need to."

"Thanks for the offer, but I got a plan. Everything is going to work out. Plus, I just got some good news. I have a job."

"Where? Can you get me in? Girl, you gonna be rocking some fly gear when you get paid," Jazmine said with lightning speed.

"Slow down, girl. I haven't started yet, but as soon as I do, I'll put in a good word for you."

She and I walked out of the bathroom together laughing and talking until I bumped into Deshaun Mitchell, the captain of the football team. Every girl at Redford High School had a crush on him, including me. Suddenly I wasn't as impressed with him as I usually was. He was still fine but compared to the man who offered me a ride the day before, Deshaun was a little boy. Don't get me wrong, I still had a mad crush on him, but the guy in the BMW was in a totally different league than Deshaun.

It really didn't matter though. I was invisible to both of them. I didn't know the name of the guy in the BMW, and Deshaun didn't pay me any attention. The chances of me seeing the man from the day before again was slim to none, especially since I was obviously too young for him. The reality of the situation was that I was a nobody to Deshaun and to the mystery man.

Imagine my surprise when I turned and found Deshaun looking right at me with his cute crooked smile. It suddenly felt like the whole world had stopped, and there was no one else in the hallway except Deshaun and me. Students in the hallway bumped into Jazz and me as they passed, bringing me back to reality.

Slowly, Deshaun turned and walked away.

"Girl, did you see that? Deshaun Mitchell just smiled at me," Jazz said with a big smile on her face.

I stared at her in disbelief. It was obvious Deshaun was smiling at me. We definitely made eye contact and shared a moment. Jazz truly believed every guy wanted her. I started to point this fact out to her, but I thought better of it. It would only cause a big argument, and then we wouldn't talk for a week, and at that time I had too many problems to lose the only friend I had. Instead I decided to flip the script.

"Yeah, I saw that. You should say something to him the next time you see him," I told her. I couldn't help but to laugh to myself. Jazmine and I had been friends since elementary school. In the second grade, I gave Jazz half of my sandwich one day during lunch because Jazz's mother had forgot to give her money to pay for her lunch. She didn't qualify for the free lunch program like I did, so I shared mine with her.

I tried not to compete with Jazz, but she compared herself to me all the time. I told her I didn't like the fact that she seemed to be competing with me, but she said that she wasn't competing, she was trying to get me to dress better. I thought that Jazz was more attractive than me. After all, the guys flocked to her when we went to the mall. It didn't matter to me what she looked like or what she wore because we were friends.

We were polar opposites when it came to style and clothing choices. Jazz rocked expensive hair weaves while I wore my own hair in a ponytail most of the time. Jazz was slim and well put together and took every opportunity to show off her shape in tight clothes. I preferred to wear my clothes loose fitting. I really didn't like drawing attention to myself.

She always tried to get me to wear her clothes so that I could show off my body, but that just wasn't me. Even if I attracted the attention of a guy while she and I were out, Jazz would later say that the guy hit on her or tried to slip her his phone number. When I asked her if I could see the number, she would say that she threw the number away because he wasn't her type. It never made sense to me, especially sense I wasn't that interested in guys. Yeah, I had a little crush on Deshaun, but I wasn't stupid. I knew I wasn't his type, and he could easily have any of the girls in our school.

"I hope he asks me to the Spring Fling. I've got this fly outfit I want to wear. Who do you want to ask you to the Fling?" Jazz asked.

I hesitated before I answered. If I said a name, Jazz would swear he had already approached her, and she had turned him down, making me seem like I was taking her left overs.

"Girl, I've got too much going on at home to be worried about a dance. Plus, I don't have any money to buy a dress. I hope Deshaun ask you to go though. Just take a lot of pictures so I can see who all went," I told her.

"You know I'm gonna take a lot of pictures."

I wanted to smack that smug smile Jazz had plastered on her face off. But instead I turned away so she wouldn't see the hurt in my eyes. I wanted to crawl in a hole and cry. There was no way to dispute it. I really was on my own. The only thing I had going for me was my new job. I closed my eyes for a moment and said a prayer.

"Please, God, let this all work out. I need something good to happen for me right now, or I think I just might lose my mind."

I arrived home at five o'clock, excited about my new job. With my job schedule in my hand, I looked around the small bungalow for my uncle. I wanted to show him my work schedule so I could avoid any further conflict. To my surprise, he was nowhere to be found.

In the kitchen, I found a pack of chicken thawing in the sink. Even though I had eaten while I was at McDonald's, I decided to cook a meal for my uncle as a peace offering. At least there would be some leftovers for tomorrow's dinner.

After seasoning the chicken, I placed it in the oven and headed to my room to do my homework. I spread my books and school papers out on my bed and focused on getting my homework done. My thoughts were pulled away from my studies by the appetizing smell of the chicken cooking in the oven, signaling to me that it was almost ready.

Just as I closed my Trigonometry book, my bedroom door swung open. Uncle Pumpkin stood in the doorway of my bedroom, obviously drunk.

"You just gonna sit there while the food burns up, you stupid bitch," he said with slurred speech.

"I was just going down there now to check on it. I put my work schedule on the refrigerator. I start tomorrow," I told him.

"How much are they paying you an hour?"

"Five fifty."

"That ain't nothing but pennies. Whatever. Just make sure you pay the light and gas bill when you get paid." Pumpkin turned and stumbled out of my room.

I got up and went downstairs to check on the food. The excitement I felt over my new job was gone. Truthfully, the whole situation was new for me. I wasn't used to being put down or belittled. My grandma had been supportive of anything positive I did. Because she supported me, I did everything I could to make her proud. Since her passing, it seemed everywhere I turned the walls were closing in on me. I really felt like giving up or just running away. The only place I had to go was Jazz's house, and I wasn't willing to do that.

My Nana use to tell me that "God never gives you more than you can bear."

I could only pray she was right.

Chapter 5

Muffin

My first day on the job was exciting, but boring. I spent the first two hours watching videos about food prep and policies. When that was over, I was given a plastic apron and told to wash the dishes that were piled up along the wall. Most teenagers would have been pissed off to wash dishes, but I was just happy to have a job. The way I saw it, work and school would keep me and my uncle out of each other's hair. He had made it clear that he didn't like me, and the first chance he got he was going to put me out.

The excitement of the day and having a job wore off as I walked to the bus stop. I was unable to focus on anything else but how much my feet hurt. I wore my two-year-old Converse gym shoes because they were the only gym shoes I had. Nana didn't have a lot of money, and I wasn't into designer clothes like Jazz. I had to buy another pair of shoes, or I was going to be crawling home from work by the end of the week. I had the money to buy them, but the next day was the only day I had off that week, and I didn't want to wait until the following week.

While I waited for the bus to come, I thought up a way to get to the store. I pulled out my cell phone and called Aunt Mattie.

"Hi, Aunt Mattie," I said when she answered the phone.

"Hello, baby, everything all right?"

"Everything is good. I got a job at McDonald's."

"Did that uncle of yours get a job? I'm not going to keep giving him money for him to drink it up," Aunt Mattie said with anger in her voice.

"I'm not sure," I told her.

I didn't want to start any trouble for myself. My goal was to see if she would take me to the mall so that I could buy myself a decent pair of shoes for work.

"Well, I'm so glad you're doing something positive with yourself. Your grandmother and your mother would be so proud of you. How are you doing in school?" she asked.

"I'm doing real good. We get our report cards next week. I'll come by so you can see it. Aunt Mattie, I need to ask you for a favor."

"You know if I can I will. What do you need?"

"I need to buy some shoes for work. Can you take me to Northland Mall tomorrow so I can buy a pair of work shoes?"

"Of course, I'll take you. Do you have to work tomorrow?" she asked.

"No, I get out of school at two forty. Can you pick me up from school?" I said, smiling from ear to ear.

"That's fine. I will pick you up from in front of the school. Did he ever get some groceries for the house like I told him to Monday?"

"Yes, he got some."

"That's good, but the next time you don't have any groceries, you call me. You don't have to be over there starving, baby."

"Yes, ma'am, if it happens again I will let you know right away. Thank you so much, Aunt Mattie."

"See you tomorrow," Aunt Mattie said before she hung up.

A car blew its horn as it drove by filled with kids my age. I felt the familiar sadness that seemed to hang over my head like a cloud since Nana died. I had never been popular in school, and Nana seldom let me go to dances or sleepovers that the popular girls at school organized. Watching the kids having carefree fun reminded me that I would never have a normal teenage life. I felt a little bit better knowing that I had my aunt on my side. I had no plans to make trouble for my uncle, but it was nice to know someone was rooting for me, and if things got too bad I could at least turn to Aunt Mattie.

Aunt Mattie came in the house to talk to Uncle Pumpkin after she took me to the mall to buy some work shoes. I wasn't sure what she said to him, but he started to act better.

After that day, there were always groceries in the refrigerator. I still wasn't sure how Uncle Pumpkin managed it, and truthfully, I really didn't care. Since he was supplying the food, I cooked as often as my work schedule would allow. He didn't eat much when I cooked. His diet was mostly liquid. He stayed drunk most of the time, but he wasn't bothering me, and that was all I cared about.

Three weeks passed before I got my first check, and I was surprised he didn't ask to see it or try to get any money from me. I usually only had to pick up the basics like milk, bread, or eggs.

Prior to that day, he barely said a word to me, but after Aunt Mattie's little talk with him, it started to change. If he was awake when I left or arrived home, he would mumble some form of greeting.

Since I had started working, the only thing that wasn't going well was my attendance at church. The first month I worked at McDonald's, I was scheduled to work every Sunday. After that I went to church every Sunday I was scheduled off until I had a run in with Brother Sturges.

When I got my first check, I called the gas and light company and told them I was my grandmother and got them to make arrangements with me. The payment plan was reasonable. I could afford to pay it out of my check from McDonald's, and I would be able to buy some personal supplies for myself. I would be able to save my whole social security check toward my college expenses.

I had managed to get Jazz a job with me at McDonald's. I was surprised at first that she was consistently coming to work when she was scheduled and doing her job properly. But I soon discovered that she only came to work so that she could meet guys. Years later, she told me that at one point she was messing around with four different guys at the same time that she had met while she was working at McDonald's.

A few months after I had started work at McDonald's I got the surprise of my life. It was busy as hell in drive-thru, but I was keeping up with my orders and rolling them out within the allotted time.

"Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order please?" I said cheerfully into the headset fastened to my head.

"Yeah, give me two double cheeseburgers and a large coke with a lot of ice," the smooth deep voice replied through the drive-thru speaker.

My heart fluttered, and it was hard to breathe for a moment. I was sure it was the man I had met several months ago at the bus stop by my house. Placing my right hand over my heart, I tried to steady myself before I spoke. I closed my eyes and pushed the button on the intercom and said, "Your total is three dollars and sixty-four cents. Please drive up to the next window."

I leaned out the drive-thru window and told the customer waiting at the window what her total was. I took her money while I simultaneously looked behind her car to see if I saw the black on black BMW that had stopped for me that cold snowy day. Slowly the beautiful black car came into view. I tried to see his face, but the sun shone brightly on the front of the car, making it impossible to make out who was driving or if someone was sitting in the passenger seat.

Since the first day that I had laid eyes on him, I had dreamed of meeting him again. I had it all planned out in my mind. On that day, I would have on a fly outfit and my hair would be flowing over my shoulders. I would even have on makeup when he asked me out. He would take me somewhere nice like Red Lobster, and then he would take me to the movies. When he brought me back home, he would kiss me passionately on the lips before he walked me to the front door.

It was obvious fate was not on my side. There I stood in my smelly McDonald's uniform, my hair pulled back into a ponytail with a silly McDonald's visor on. As I made change for the customer waiting at the window, I quickly tried to decide how I was going to handle the situation. I had to play it cool so that he wouldn't think that I was all over his junk.

All kinds of crazy thoughts ran through my mind, like what if he had his girlfriend with him? Should I speak to him or just treat him like a regular customer and keep it moving? Realistically, he probably wouldn't even remember a silly school girl at a bus stop. As fine as he was, I was sure that chicks were falling all over themselves trying to get with him.

I blew out a deep breath and pulled myself together and forced myself to focus on what was really important. Doing my job. After all, I was too young for him anyway.

I handed the waiting customer her change, her drink and food, giving her a big smile. I thanked her and told her to come again.

I pressed the intercom button and repeated the same salutation I had given the mystery man in the black BMW. While punching in items that the next customer requested, I opened the drive-thru window and told the sexy brown skin man with the satin baritone voice his total.

"That will be three dollars and sixty-four cents," I said with confidence.

I felt that same confidence drain from me when our eyes met. How could one man be so damn sexy? His coal black eyes seemed to bore right through me just like the first time we met.

"Hey, Shorty. You still going to school?" the deep voice said. The soft melodic sounds of Najee floated out of his vehicle and straight into my heart.

Oh my God, what do I do now? I thought.

I really hoped he wouldn't remember me, and maybe then I would still have a chance to impress him the next time we met.

"Hi," was all I managed to say as I applied a death grip on the five-dollar bill he held in his hand extended out of the car window toward me.

I took the money and closed the drive-thru window. I mentally chastised myself for acting like a pimple-faced teenager. I needed this man to see me as a woman. I had to pull it together. I closed my eyes and started counting to ten.

"Are you all right?" I heard Jazz ask just as I had reached the count of seven.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her toward me. Even though the drive-thru window was closed and Mr. Sexy couldn't hear what I was saying, I whispered to Jazz, "Girl, that's the guy I told you about."

Jazz leaned forward so she could look past me and out the window. I watched a strange smile spread across her face. I was about to straight strangle her as she pushed past me and opened the drive-thru window and started talking to Mr. Sexy like he belonged to her.

"What's up, Boom?" Jazz said to the man in the car.

"Hey, Jazz. How's your mother doing?" the man replied.

"She's good. You don't come around anymore. When are you going to stop by and see me and my mom?" she asked.

I couldn't believe my ears. I felt like such a fool. If he used to come by and see her mother, then he was way out of my league. He was probably one of her mother's boyfriends or something. The only good thing was that I learned his name or at least his nickname. Whatever nervousness I felt before had left. I punched in the amount he gave me and counted out his change while he and Jazz continued to talk. I grabbed his food and drink off the counter where the manager had set it for me to give to the customer.

I cut Jazz off and said, "Thank you and come again."

He looked up into my face and time seemed to slow when I handed him his food and change.

"You take care, ma," he said.

I wanted to stay mad, but I felt myself blush. He had a way of making me feel like I was special. Since my grandmother died, he seemed to be the only person who seemed to really see me, or at least that's what I hoped.

Boom pulled off and like a star stuck kid, I watched his car until he turned on to McNichols Street and drove out of sight. My headset beeped in my ear reminding me that I had a job to do. I reached down to the belt I wore around my waist and pushed the button for the intercom and said, "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order please?"

I took the next customer's order and turned to face Jazz. She had her usual smug smile on her face.

"I know you are not feeling Boom. He is way over your head," she said with a laugh.

"Yeah, I know. I told you he was grown. Is he one of you mother's boyfriends?" I asked, hoping he wasn't.

"Naw, girl. He's way too young for my mother. He's only about twenty. That sexy as mustache and beard makes him look older, don't it?"

"It doesn't matter anyway. I know he's not interested in a high school girl like me, and I know fine as he is, he has a girl."

"I don't know if he has a girl, but I wouldn't mind finding out what he has to offer," Jazz said mischievously.

Jazz was the same age as me, but she had been having sex since she was thirteen and had even had an abortion. Her mother put her on the Depo-Provera shot to keep her from getting pregnant again. The Depo shot made her hair come out so she started wearing hair weaves to cover up the ball spots she had. Even though I felt sleeping around was wrong, I never said anything about it to her. The bible says, "Judge not least ye be judged" and right now my thoughts about Boom were less than pure.

I smiled to myself and opened the drive-thru window to do my job. At least I knew she hadn't got her claws into Boom. If she had, she definitely would have bragged about it. I knew I didn't have a chance in hell of getting with Boom, but a girl could still dream.

When my shift was over, I waved goodbye to Jazz and went to the bus stop. Jazz didn't get off for another hour.

It was almost December, and the weather was mild, about forty degrees. For Michigan, that was almost spring weather. There were two other people sitting on the bench at the bus stop. I leaned my head back and thought about all the things I need to do and all the things I wanted to do, but I didn't have the money for, like prom.

Prom was six months away, and I wanted so badly to go, but I didn't have a date. Lately, Deshaun was more friendly than usual, but I wasn't dumb enough to think he would be interested in me. That same day during lunch at school, I listened in on the conversation of some of the popular girls sitting at the table next to me and discovered he still hadn't asked anyone to the prom. Like me, they were still hoping that Deshaun would ask them. Jazz would die if he did. She was going to prom with some guy she met over the summer. He went to Cooley High School. She was excited because the week after our prom she was going to his prom, too.

Last Friday, I went with her and her mother to look at dresses. I tried on a few but I didn't see anything that I liked. Even if I did see something I liked, I wouldn't have told Jazz. I loved her, but she was very jealous hearted toward me. For the life of me I couldn't imagine why. She had Coach purses that cost more than my whole wardrobe, not to mention all the other designer clothes and shoes she owned.

As I waited for the bus to arrive, I heard Najee's smooth sounds bumping. I looked in the direction the music was coming from, hoping it was Boom, but I didn't see his car.

Just when I was about to give up on see his BMW, the sun reflected off the roof of his car and caught my eye. I watched him turn left at the light and head in my direction. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't seem to do it. He stopped in front of me at the bus stop.

"Still waiting on the bus," Boom said in a seductive voice.

"Yeah, trying to save my money to get a car," I said.

"Hop in, I'll take you home."

I hesitated for a moment and then I stood. I prayed that Jazz didn't see me getting in the car with Boom. I would never hear the end of it if she did.

Once I was in the car, he turned down the music and just stared at me. After a few seconds, he turned on that megawatt smile and melted my heart. I felt my face flush.

"Where do you live, ma?" he asked.

"On Winthrop off of Puritan," I said nervously.

"I know you're not still afraid of me, are you?"

"Naw, I'm not afraid," I replied.

He turned the car around and headed toward Greenfield and then made a right. Suddenly, I became nervous. I couldn't let my uncle see me getting out of his car. I touched his hand to get his attention and felt a tiny shock. He looked at me with those coal black eyes, and suddenly I couldn't seem to find the words I needed to say.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Can you just drop me off at the corner? My uncle is very strict, and I don't want any trouble with him," I finally said.

"How old are you?"

"I'm seventeen. I turn eighteen in July," I told him.

"I'm glad you didn't lie to me. Shit like that can get a nigga locked up." He looked me up and down and then said, "But I might be willing to take a chance on you."

He turned right on Puritan and pulled into the parking lot of the corner grocery store and put his car in park.

"Thanks for the ride," I said with a trembling voice.

"No problem, little momma."

I got out of the car and walked toward my street. I was walking on a cloud. Little old me just rode with Mr. Sexy. I knew he would never be mine, but I could tell he liked me. If he didn't, he wouldn't have said the stuff about taking a chance on me.

Somehow, I knew I would see him again. What I didn't know was this man was going to change my life in ways I could never have imagined.

Chapter 6

Pumpkin

Muffin thought that she was slick. I know she called Aunt Mattie on me. Aunt Mattie didn't say anything about me kicking Muffin's ass, but I know Muffin told her.

Aunt Mattie made it perfectly clear that if I didn't start buying food and paying something on the bills, she would make my life hell. I didn't think she knew that my mother left the house to Muffin, but I wasn't taking any chances. Each week I went around to all the food banks and picked up food for the house. It wasn't steak and caviar, but at least there was food to eat. I managed to get money for my beer by begging on the corner or turning in bottles for the deposit.

She cooked most nights, but I didn't eat anything. I didn't trust her after I had to get in her ass. Every time we made eye contact, she looked at me like she would kill me if she could.

Aunt Mattie called me a lazy no good piece of shit because I hadn't shoveled the snow off the porch.

"Muffin lives here, too. She can shovel the snow," I told her.

"I already said something to her about it. She said she would shovel the snow before she left to go to school. It's obvious you have been lying around all day doing nothing. It's at least an inch or two on the porch. Plus, it snowed most of the morning. Pumpkin, you sho nuf lazy."

I wanted to scream get out of my face, but my aunt was crazy as hell, and there was no telling what she would do to me if I did. Then after I thought about it, I realized I still had it gravy. It wasn't costing me anything to get groceries, and Muffin was taking care of everything else. It would be worth it to push a little snow to keep my aunt off my back.

The next day I walked up to the grocery store and cashed in some pop cans that Mrs. Mims, the lady next door, had given me. She was a nice lady, and she always gave me her cans to turn in, but her son was a different story. He had hated me since he was a little kid. He was a spoiled brat that thought he knew everything. Now that he called himself trying to be a dope dealer, he really thought he was the shit. Whenever he was around and his mother was talking to me, he would give me the stank eye like he was going to fuck me up the first chance he got.

Mrs. Mims was good to me, so I stayed out of his way. I wasn't afraid of him, but I didn't want to start any trouble with him either.

Just as I walked out of the store, I noticed a black BMW come to a stop several yards away. I couldn't see inside, but I was shocked when the door opened and out stepped my fast ass niece. I wasn't able to see who was driving, but I was sure that it was a young dude I'd seen around the neighborhood. He was a small-time dope dealer, but he was coming up and making a name for himself. I had never bought anything directly from him, but I knew he was moving weight.

I leaned against the building, trying to figure out an angle. My first instinct was to go home and kick Muffin's ass again, but that wouldn't help me. If Muffin managed to get in with this dude, I might be able to cop a little something from him from time to time.

While I was standing there, the driver's side window rolled down, and the dude leaned out the window and watched Muffin as she walked down our street. He looked mesmerized as she swung her hips from side to side. I started to run up behind her and bust her in the back of her head, but I just watched, thinking about how this was going to all work out in my favor.

Chapter 7

Boom

Man, Muffin was a fine little shorty. I could tell she was inexperienced. I hated to admit it, but her innocence excited me. The last thing I needed, however, was a babe new to the game. Her girl Jazmine knew what was up, but I wouldn't touch her for all the money in the world. Jazz had been around the block and damn sure knew all the addresses. I used to sell weed to her mother, but she started offering ass as payment, so I had to cut her loose. I like to fuck just as much as the next guy, and I might have taken her up on it, but she was old as hell, plus she was fat and flabby. I had stopped slinging weed anyway. I had moved on to bigger shit. I needed my pockets to get fatter faster.

When you're in my line of business, bitches can be a liability, especially ones that weren't familiar with the game. They could run their mouths to the wrong person about what you were into and how you were keeping her laced in fly gear and cause you to catch a case.

I had to admit that I was a little pumped when I saw shorty at McDonald's, but when Jazz stuck her head out the window talking stuff, I figured it was a sign to pass on hitting Muffin's fat, fine ass. I don't believe in horoscopes or that fortune teller shit, but I did believe the universe sent you signs and signals. If your dumb ass don't listen, you got what you had coming to you.

So, when I saw Muffin later on that evening standing at the bus stop, that tight ass of hers was calling my name. I was kind of surprise she got in the car with me though. Her girl Jazz wouldn't have hesitated, but Muffin seemed to have a level head on her shoulders.

After listening to her talk on the ride to her house, I could tell she was new to the game. Plus, she seemed like a nice kid trying to make something of herself. I decided to back off, but I planned to keep an eye on shorty and see if her number came up again. If all the stars lined up in her favor, then it was on.

If I was a pussy hound like most of my boys and couldn't control myself, I would have run after shorty and tried to lay down some game. Even in that cheesy McDonald's outfit, she looked fly as hell. Everyone in the parking lot of Greenfield Market was watching her walk away. Her body was tight as hell, and all that long black hair flowing down her back was exotic. You could tell it wasn't a weave or nothing because it flowed right from her scalp.

I watched her walk down Winthrop Street two blocks and walk up to a red and yellow house. Once she was safely inside, I turned up my sounds and pulled off.

I had business to take care of. My music usually helped me calm down, but that day it just wasn't helping. I kept thinking about that round ass of Muffin's. She was dangerous from the start, but I just couldn't resist.

I drove over to Forrer Park and lit up a fat one to relax my nerves and clear my head before I got to my man Law. This deal I had hooked up with him could put me on top.

By the time I rolled up to Law's crib, I had gotten my head right. Law was sitting on the front porch holding a little baby in a snowsuit, which I assume was his kid.

I parked my car in front of his house so I won't block his driveway. I popped the trunk of my car, checked to make sure my nine was secure on my waist, and got out of my ride. I kept a watch out for anything that looked suspicious. Law and me were cool, but you never know when a nigga has gotten in over his head and needed to fire your ass up to make ends meet. I grabbed a blue and red backpack out of my trunk and then hit my alarm after I shut the trunk.

"What up?" I yelled to my man as I approached his porch. I saw the tip of a Glock peeking out of a towel he had in his lap.

"You got it," he replied. We eyed each other for a few moments.

"Sheena, come get the baby," he yelled over his shoulder. A fine chick with a fur jacket walked out rocking a Michael Kors bag on one shoulder and a baby bag on the other. I stood at the bottom of the steps and watched her lean over to take the baby from his arms. I couldn't help but to admire her body. She was shapely with a nice ass. My man Law had good taste in women. She walked past me without making eye contact or acknowledging my presence.

Now that's what I'm talking about. His girl knew her place and stayed in it.

"Have a seat," Law said, pointing to a plastic chair sitting on the other side of the door in front of the picture window.

I grabbed the chair and moved it close to the rail so that I could tell if the curtains moved and I could see if someone rolled up on me from the street.

"We about to handle business out here?" I questioned him.

"Naw, I'm just waiting for my girl to pull out. Then we can go inside."

His girl back down the driveway in a brand new green Lincoln Navigator and drove down the street and turned right at the intersection. Once he could no longer see her truck, he stood and motioned for me to follow him into the house.

I stood and unsnapped my leather jacket so I could get my hand on my Glock easily. I walked through the door and admired the interior. His house was a plushed-out colonial with everything decorated in beige and brown, including the furniture and accessories. His girl definitely had taste. The only thing that seemed strange about the whole situation was him bringing his business to his home. Everybody in the street knew you didn't shit where you ate. My man Law seemed smarter than that.

"You have a nice place," I said casually.

"This ain't my place. It's one of my bitches. That way if some shit go down, it's on her not me," he said smugly.

"How does that cover you? If you up in the spot when it gets nailed, your ass is still on fire, right?"

"That's just it. This ain't where I sleep." He pointed to a picture over the fireplace of a chick holding a baby.

"She's just some bitch that was dumb enough to let herself get knocked up by me. I take care of mine, but when I see an opportunity to make a piece of ass work for me, I take it. Plus, I never leave my shit in the same spot more than once. After today, my product moves on to a new location, if you don't buy me out."

I packed that piece of knowledge away in my head and waited to see what Law's next move was going to be. Law was a big black dude with a bald head. He was at least forty-five, which was old for a dope boy. He was also a big player in the dope game in Detroit. If you wanted to buy weight on the Westside of Detroit, he was the man to see. My boy Clint had vouched for me and got me a meeting with Law.

Law was known to be on the up and up, but I didn't trust anybody. I wouldn't have dealt with him at all, but there was a drought in the hood at that time, and he was the only one who had any product.

My two dope spots were begging me for product, so I decided to take a chance and hook up with this dude. Law was a solitary cat, but just in case he had some motherfuckers waiting to take my cash off me and keep the product, I had a couple of my boys, Cyanide and Mario, waiting on the next block for the signal. All I had to do was press the send button on my cell phone, and this spot would be hotter than hell.

"Have a seat, my man," Law told me.

I walked over to the couch against the wall and sat down. From there I could see the whole house, including the front door.

"What you trying to get?" Law asked, sitting in a chair across from me.

"I need five."

"What if I cut you a deal on seven? Like I said, I would rather sell it all to you so I don't have to worry about moving my shit around."

"What kind of paper you talkin' about?"

"I usually let my shit go for twenty a key, but if you take all seven I'll let you have it for one hundred and twenty out the door."

I opened the backpack and counted out one hundred twenty thousand dollars neatly wrapped in stacks of ten thousand dollars each.

I watched Law pull a huge black plastic bag down from the fireplace. He placed it on the coffee table between us and pulled out seven white bricks wrapped in clear plastic bags. I opened the bag in the middle a little and took out a small amount and rubbed it on my back gums. Instantly my gums became numb.

"We all good," Law asked.

"We all good," I replied.

I reached back into my backpack and pulled out some scotch tape and sealed the bag I had just opened. Next, I slid the stacks of money toward Law and proceeded to load the coke in my backpack.

Law took the stacks of money and slid them into the black plastic bag and tied a knot in it, before he stood and extended his right hand.

"Nice doing business with you," Law said with a sincere grin on his face.

"Same here," I replied.

"You know how to reach me if you need more."

"True that, "I replied. Once I had what I had come for, I no longer felt like talking. I just wanted to get the hell out of there before something went wrong.

I followed Law to the front door and looked both ways before stepping out. I walked to my ride, quickly disarming the alarm just as I reached for the door handle. This was my first major drug transaction, and I was scared to death. I was sure I seemed calm as hell to Law, but truthfully, I was trembling on the inside.

Once I had my car started and in drive, I pressed the send button on my phone at the same time I pressed the gas pedal. I told Cyanide that I was all clear and to meet me at the spot.

I drove off heading to my spot so I could get my shit cut and bagged up. After it was cut and packaged, I would be able to make my presence known in the "D." Maybe even expand my territory.

Niggas on my payroll were starving, and I need everybody to eat so I could eat, too.

Chapter 8

Muffin

After Boom gave me a ride home from work, I found it hard to not think about him. The next day it was hard to pay attention in class. My English teacher Ms. Campbell noticed and told me to stay after when she dismissed class.

"I called you several times in class today, and you weren't paying attention," she said. "What's going on, Muffin?"

"Nothing's wrong, Ms. Campbell."

"I know you've had a really hard time since your grandmother died. You know you can always talk to me if you have a problem."

"Yes, I know."

"This is your last year. I hope you haven't gotten yourself mixed up with some boy. You're one of my best students, and I know that you're planning to go to college. Don't let a boy ruin it for you."

"I won't, Ms. Campbell. Can I go now? I don't want to be late for my next class."

"That's it, Muffin."

I turned and left as fast as I could without running.

I felt that I had just lied to her. The truth was I couldn't get Boom off of my mind.

Jazz didn't come to school that day, so I sat alone in the cafeteria and ate my lunch, daydreaming about Boom. I heard someone call my name, so I looked around to see who it was and found myself looking up into the puppy dog eyes of DeShaun.

"Hey, Muffin, you mind if I eat lunch with you?" Deshaun asked.

"Sure," I said in total shock.

The whole time I had attended Redford High School, no one had ever asked to eat lunch with me other than Jazz. Sometimes a few guys would flirt with me in the hallway, but they never tried to get my number or anything. I always wondered about it but figured since I didn't have fly clothes like the rest of the girls, they just ignored me. Not wanting to say anything stupid, I waited for Deshaun to say something first.

"Are you going to the prom?" Deshaun asked.

"No. Are you?" I replied.

"I want to go, but I don't have a date," he said shyly.

"All you have to do is ask any girl here." I waved my hand toward the other people in the cafeteria.

"Maybe I want to ask you," he replied.

For a few seconds, we just stared at each other. My first thought was that this was a prank or something. Why would he want to go to the prom with me?

"Why? I mean, why would you want to go to the prom with me?" I asked.

"'Cause I like you, and I've always wanted to ask you out, but I thought you had a boyfriend already."

"Why would you think I had a boyfriend?"

"Your friend Jazz told me you had someone already. I tried to get her to pass you a note in assembly last year, and she told me that you already had a man."

I wanted to scream. That heifer really was jealous of me. All that time she knew Deshaun liked me, and she had been blocking. I got that she wanted him for herself, but we were supposed to be friends. If I had liked a guy, but I found out that the guy liked her instead, I wouldn't have cock blocked her like that.

"I don't have a boyfriend, and I'm not sure why she told you that," I said to him.

"Good, then will you go to the prom with me?" Deshaun asked, smiling like a Cheshire cat.

I really had no intentions of going to the prom. Buying a prom dress and accessories was really expensive, and I planned to save as much money as I could for college, but now that I knew what Jazz had done, I was going to go just to show her up. I just hoped this wasn't some kind of prank that DeShaun and his friends were playing on me.

"Sure, DeShaun, I would love to go to the prom with you," I told him.

He smiled at me across the table like he had just been handed a winning lotto ticket. Maybe things were looking up for me after all. The only problem was getting a prom dress.

That night I thought about calling Jazz and telling her about Boom giving me a ride home from the bus stop, but now that I knew how she had played me, I wasn't sure I would ever talk to her again. Instead I laid around imagining what it would feel like to be Boom's girl. I knew he was a dope boy, and I usually didn't go for that kind of guy, but he was different from most of the hood rich guys that I knew. Even though I hadn't had much conversation with him, I could tell that he was intelligent. There weren't any other guys around the neighborhood that pumped Najee on their sound system.

I really hoped Boom would stop by McDonald's again. I usually pulled my hair back in a ponytail, but from that day forward, I curled my hair and let it fall around my shoulders. All day at school, people complimented my hair, especially DeShaun. It took more time in the morning, but I did it anyway. I had to admit, I liked the compliments that it got me.

I knew I should have been happy that DeShaun was interested in me, but I just couldn't get Boom out of my mind. I could see why girls went for the bad boys. It definitely didn't help that Boom was fine as hell, but he was a grown man, and I was still in high school. I wasn't even sure if Boom was interested in me. At this point we had bumped into each other a couple of times, and he still hadn't asked me for my phone number. If he was trying to get to know me, he would have tried to get my digits.

DeShaun was more on my level, and so I decided to give it a go with him. Boom would have to stay the fantasy man of my dreams.

When school let out, I hurried to work so I wouldn't be late.

The day was uneventful and Mr. Sexy didn't come by McDonald's. I was sad he didn't stop by, but I still had prom to look forward to. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't help but wish that Boom was taking me to the prom instead of DeShaun. There was no way Boom would be interested in going to a silly high school prom though. It seemed that I always settled for second best back then. My clothes were generic, my one and only friend was a hater, and I was stuck with my no-good uncle because no one else in my family had stepped up to take me in.

I left work feeling melancholy but hopeful. At the bus stop, I kept looking around, hoping I would see Boom, but he never showed. While I waited, I called Aunt Mattie and told her about Deshaun asking me to the prom. I think she was more excited than I was. She insisted on taking me shopping that Saturday. She had always wanted a daughter but had only been blessed with two boys, so she was happy to have me to make up for the lost opportunity.

Once I got off the bus, I headed directly for home. My uncle and I were getting along by staying out of each other's way, but today I felt like sharing my good news. I headed for my bedroom to put down my book bag but stopped dead in my tracks. My room had been ransacked, and my television was missing. I ran to the tin can I kept in my room with money I had saved from my paychecks and found it empty. There was over one hundred dollars in there. Without thinking, I yelled my uncle's name.

After getting no response, I went room to room looking for him, but I wasn't able to find him. No other room had been bothered, just mine. No one needed to tell me that my uncle had ripped me off. I went back to my room and slammed the door and threw myself across my bed. Since my grandma's funeral, I had tried to be strong, but at that moment, I felt like giving up. Tears flowed from my eyes as my body wretched from the pain I felt inside. I realized that it could have been worse. He could have gotten all of my money. My social security check went directly into my savings account each month, and the bank statement was mailed to Jazz's house. Now that I knew she had stabbed me in the back, I would have to find somewhere else to send my mail, but where. I didn't have any other friends, and Aunt Mattie's apartment wouldn't let me have my mail sent there.

Once I was all cried out, I went downstairs to make myself a sandwich. The mail was thrown on the kitchen table next to dirty dishes that my sorry uncle had left for me to clean. I didn't know how, but I planned to pay his ass back in spades.

I gathered the mail and sorted it out, throwing away the junk mail as I went. Since I had to pay the bills, I tried to keep track of how much I owed so nothing got turned off. I was surprised to find a letter from Ryan Prison. Since Nana died and the house phone was cut off, I hadn't heard from my mother. I folded the letter up and put it in my pocket. I tossed the rest of the mail in a kitchen drawer.

I was interested in seeing what my mother had to say, so I fixed myself something to eat and took the plate with me to my room so I could read her letter in private.

I curled up on my twin bed and opened my mother's letter. She had never written to me before. If she had, my grandmother never told me. The letters were always addressed to Nana, and she never let me read them, so I was surprised at how pretty her handwriting was. I leaned against the headboard on my bed and read her words:

Muffin,

My beautiful daughter. I am sorry that I am locked up when you need me the most. I have thought long and hard about how I can be as useful to you as I can from this hell hole I find myself in.

I talked with Aunt Mattie, and she told me that you are still staying in Mama's house with my good-for-nothing brother. Please be careful as my brother has his own demons and has always thought only of himself. I know I should be grateful that he has agreed to watch over you, but I know what he is capable of.

I know that you are a bright and intelligent young lady. Aunt Mattie said that you're keeping your grades up and that you are planning to go away to college. Mama would be proud of you and so am I. Please follow your dreams and get as far away from Detroit as you can.

If at any time you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, please let Aunt Mattie know. I still have about four years left on my sentence, but because of overcrowding, I may be able to get out early on parole due to good behavior. I have taken some college courses and plan to go back to school and straighten my life out when I get out.

If you have time, please write me back. I would love to hear from you, and if you can, please send me a picture.

Love,

Your mother

I thought I was all cried out, but reading her letter only made me cry some more. I knew her words were meant to make me feel better, but they only reminded me that everyone who claimed they loved me was gone. I folded the letter back up and put it back in the envelope and placed it on my bed. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pen to write her a letter. I needed to tell her how trapped and lonely I felt. I knew it would probably make her feel bad, but I had no one else to talk to. And as far as I was concerned, she should feel bad. If she wasn't locked up for doing something stupid, she would be here with me.

When I was finished writing the letter, it was three pages long. I had told her as much as I could without putting myself in jeopardy. I truly believed my mother loved me and wanted to see me safe, but she had no control over what my crazy ass uncle did. So, I only told her that I was trying to save money because Uncle Pumpkin had made it clear that I would have to get out after I graduated. I left out the fact that he stole my television and money. I had to take it as a lesson and make sure I didn't leave anything else in this house he could sell for a drink or worse. My mother's letter spoke of my uncle's demons; I was starting to believe that the drinking was the least of his issues.

I thought about telling Aunt Mattie, but once again, what good would it do.

Jazz called me twice while I was writing to my mom, but I let it go to voicemail. I knew I would have to talk to her eventually, but I needed time to think of what I was going to say to her. I also needed to decide if I was going to maintain my friendship with her. It was obvious that I thought more of her than she thought of me.

After I finished my homework, I turned off my bedroom light and got in bed. Around three in the morning, I heard my uncle finally stumble in. He slept in the room next to my grandma on the first floor, and I hoped and prayed he would take his drunk ass to sleep and not come up the steps and turn on my light as he often did to check and see if I was at home.

Being the asshole that he was, he stumbled up the stairs and turned on my light. I kept my eyes closed and played like I was asleep. I could smell the stale beer and liquor from the door. He turned off my light and headed back down the steps. As if to show my uncle that he was messing with one of God's children, he tripped and fell down the steps, causing him to yell out in pain. I sat up in my bed and listened to see if he would get up. Several moments passed before I heard him bumping against various walls as he tried to get up and go to his room.

I curled up in my bed feeling like God was looking out for me just a little.

I closed my eyes and tried to fall sleep with thoughts of what it would feel like to kiss Boom.

Chapter 9

Muffin

Even though I was happy that I had a job, it didn't leave me with much time to go to church. I loved singing in the choir and studying the bible. My Nana was a missionary at Holy Zion Third Baptist Church where I was brought up. She was well thought of by everyone at Holy Zion, and after she died, I didn't want to do anything to shame her in her absence.

When Nana first died, I wasn't sure how I was going to get to church on Sundays, but Reverend Woodbridge arranged for the church van to pick me up on Sunday mornings. All I had to do was call the church on Saturday and let them know that I needed a ride.

I called the church office and arranged to be picked up the Sunday after DeShaun asked me to go to the prom with him. I was so happy that I was asked to go to the prom that I felt I needed to go to church and give God the praise he was due.

With my first check, I purchased a beautiful lavender suit. It had a short bolero jacket with small pearls sown on the collar. It wasn't the type of outfit I would usually wear to church. Most of my church clothes had long jackets that covered up my butt. The dress was not form fitting, but it was still obvious that I had hips to birth a nation and a rear end to carry them on.

The church services were lively, and I felt right at home in the house of the Lord. Finely, my life seemed to be going in the right direction. I had a job and could finally buy myself some new clothes. I rose from the pew after the church service was over feeling rejuvenated until one of the older sisters pulled me to the side after church and said, "That's a pretty color on you."

"Thank you," I replied.

"Since your grandmother died, you've really blossomed."

"Um, I don't know what you mean."

"All them hips and thighs."

"I beg your pardon."

"I'm don't mean any harm, it's just you never showed all of that when your grandmother was around," she said, looking me up and down.

I wanted to scream at her and tell her to shut up, but I just clutched my bible to my chest and walked away.

I hurried to the church van, trying not to cry. When I got to the van, members were lined up to get in. Brother Sturges was waiting at the sliding door of the van as usual, helping the ladies get in. When I reached for his hand to step up in the van, he ran his other hand down my back until he reached my butt, and then he grabbed it.

My mouth fell open in shock. I looked back at him with venom in my eyes. To my surprise, he just smiled at me as if nothing had happened. I took a seat on the second row, sliding all the way over to the window. Brother Sturges continued to smile his yellow denture filled smile at me as if nothing had occurred.

Ten minutes or so past before the last person got on the bus, and he shut the door and took his seat behind the wheel.

One by one, he dropped off each passenger. After he had touched me, I dreaded being the last person to get off the bus. In all the years I had known Brother Sturges, he had never said or done anything inappropriate. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why he had chosen that moment to do what he did.

I scooted to the edge of the seat so that I could exit quickly when the van came to a stop in front of my house. As the van slowed down, I stood as much as I could and hurried to the door. As old as Brother Sturges appeared to be, he managed to make it around the front of the van just in time to catch my arm when I stepped down off of the van.

"I wanted to tell you that you're really looking mighty nice today," Brother Sturges said to me.

"Thank you," I said. I tried to pull my arm away from the tight grip he had on me.

"I know I'm an old man and all, but I still got some life in me. A man my age don't want that much from a woman. If you was just willing to spend some time with me here and there, I could help you with a little money so you can get your hair done and stuff."

"Brother Sturges, you are old enough to be my grandfather, and I just turned seventeen."

"Seventeen is grown in some places in the world. I'm really harmless. I just want to look at you and play with it a little bit, that's all."

"I don't think so. Please let go of me," I said.

In response, Brother Sturges tightened his grip on my arm.

"I said let go of me," I screamed out.

The screen door to Mrs. Mims' house slammed shut.

"Let her go," I heard Big E yell out.

Brother Sturges let go of my arm and hightailed it to the driver's side of the van and got in. He threw the van in drive and sped off.

I took several steps but found that I was unable to breathe. The world seemed to be spinning around me. I tried to maintain my balance, but I knew I was about to fall when the world suddenly went black.

When I came to, Uncle Pumpkin, Big E, and Mrs. Mims were standing over me.

"Thank God. She's awake," Mrs. Mims said.

"What the hell happened?" Uncle Pumpkin asked.

"I don't know," I replied.

"What did that old man do to you? I heard you telling him to let go of you," Big E asked.

"He grabbed my butt when I got on the van at church," I replied, "then he grabbed my arm when I got out of the van and told me he would give me money if I would spend time with him. When I told him no and to let go of me, he squeezed my arm even harder."

I pulled up my sleeve to show them where he had grabbed me. Mrs. Mims gasped when she saw the dark bruises where he had held my arm.

"I heard some things about Brother Sturges," she said, "but I just figured it was women gossiping and starting rumors. Plus, he's such good friends with Pastor Woodbridge."

"See that's why I don't go to church," Pumpkin said as he paced Mrs. Mims' living room floor. "They just want your money. That preacher is a man just like me. Wait until I get my hands on that preacher."

"I already called him," Mrs. Mims said. "He's on his way over here now. Mattie is on her way, too."

Aunt Mattie arrived first. She rushed in the house and threw her arms around me and pulled me up off the couch.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I'm so sorry," she repeated over and over.

"I'm okay, Aunty," I replied.

"Come on, baby. Let's get you home. Thank you, Rosie, for seeing about my niece."

"No problem, Mattie," Mrs. Mims replied.

Just as we reached her front door, someone knocked on the door. Aunt Mattie and I stepped back so that Big E could open the door.

Reverend Woodbridge stood at the door with his hat in his hand wearing a grave expression on his face.

Big E unlocked the screen and pushed it open so Reverend Woodbridge could step inside.

"Good afternoon," Reverend Woodbridge said.

Everyone said good afternoon in response.

"Have a seat," Mrs. Mims said, pointing to a high back chair in her living room.

Everyone took a seat except Big E. He stood by the front door with a menacing look on his face.

"What are you going to do about Sturges?" Aunt Mattie said.

"I understand that you're upset, sister, but what exactly happened?" the reverend asked.

"I told you, my son said he grabbed her by the arm and wouldn't let go when the child got off the bus," Mrs. Mims said.

"Well, maybe he was trying to help her off the van and just held on to tight. You know he's a big man. I think maybe he doesn't know his own strength."

"Muffin says he offered her money to spend time with him, and he grabbed her butt when she got on the bus after church, too," Big E said.

Big E took two steps toward Rev. Woodbridge. His hands closed in tight fists.

"Is that what happened, Muffin?" Reverend Woodbridge said, appearing unfazed.

"Yes," I said.

"What did you say to Brother Sturges?" Reverend Woodbridge asked.

"Why does it matter what she said to him? She is a kid, and that old man had no business touching her," Big E said loudly.

"Calm down, baby," Mrs. Mims said. "Reverend is just trying to find out exactly what happened."

"Man, I ain't got time for this shit. I know what I saw, and that old motherfucker needs to be dealt with," Big E said as he marched toward the front door.

"Reverend," I began, "I told him that I wasn't interested and that I was only seventeen years old. He told me that in some places in the world that was considered grown and wouldn't let go of my arm when I tried to get away from him."

Reverend Woodbridge dropped his head, looking defeated. After a few seconds had passed, he said, "I assure you that Brother Sturges will be dealt with, and he definitely won't be driving the church bus anymore," he replied.

"You still ain't said what you're going to do about Sturges," Big E said.

"Young man, trust me, it will be handle."

A calmness fell over Big E before he said, "We'll see."

Chapter 10

Boom

Business was humming along like it should. All my spots were supplied with product, and my money was flowing. I was thinking about moving downtown to one of the new lofts, but I would need to find someone to let me put it in their name. The Feds had cracked down on shit like that. You needed to be able to show how you could afford the shit you bought. Cash was still king, but being able to legitimize your source of income was queen.

The few hood rats I fucked around with had little or no skills and minimum wage jobs if they had a job at all. The only one that came to mind was this chick Mona who had been trying to get me in her bed for a while. She wasn't my type, but she worked for the Detroit Board of Education. So, I called her up the night before and asked her if we could hook up. At first, I was worried she would turn me down since I hadn't been returning her phone calls. But she gave me her address and told me to come on by.

I planned to blow her back out and get her hooked on this good dick. Then I would wait a couple of months and run the idea of her helping me get a place by her. If she agreed, I would keep hitting that ass until I was tired of it. If she declined, she would be instantly cut off.

When I got to her crib, she was standing in the doorway in a T-shirt and some booty shorts. I was worried for nothing. She apparently didn't care if this was a booty call because no sooner than she had closed the front door and locked it, she was all over me.

I was about to push her fat ass off of me, but before I could she dropped to her knees and unzipped my pants. It didn't matter how homely she was, I wasn't going to pass up getting my dick sucked.

I had to give it to her, she had my knees weak. She applied just the right amount of pressure and began bobbing her head up and down on my shit. I grabbed a handful of her hair and pushed my dick in and out of her mouth. I looked down and saw her taking my dick down her throat like a champ, and I just about lost my load. It wasn't like I had a little pencil dick. When my shit was hard, I needed two hands to cover all of it, and she was deep throating my shit like it was nothing.

I let go of her head and grabbed my own; I was trying to fight the urge to cum. Mona must have sensed it because she took my dick out of her mouth and stood. I opened my eyes and watched her take her T-shirt off. She seductively ran her hands across the black lace bra that was holding up her large tits. She reached behind her and unsnapped the bra, letting her plump breasts fall free. She then just stood there looking at me. Large tits and big asses were my thing. She was one for two.

I reached out and ran my hand across her left breast, pinching the large nipple between my fingers. A moan escaped her lips when I leaned forward and took her right breast in my mouth. We both almost fell when she stepped backwards and leaned against the wall. My pants and underwear were around my ankles, causing me to shuffle forward.

She grabbed my dick and started to stroke it while I teased her breast with my tongue. The need to fuck her became overwhelming.

"Take those shorts off and turn around," I told her.

Without hesitation she shimmied out of the shorts and let them fall to the floor and turned around and faced the wall. While she did this, I reached down and pulled my pants up enough for me to get my hand in the back pocket. I grabbed the condoms I brought with me and ripped one off and shoved the other two back in my pocket. I rolled it on my dick after I ripped it open and stepped back.

I checked her from behind and was not impressed. Her ass was flat as a pancake, but I was past caring. My shit was rock hard and ready to hammer her pussy out.

I grabbed her roughly by the waist and pulled her back toward me. I held my dick in the other hand and guided it into her wet pussy. I felt little resistance, so I plowed on in. She moaned when I hit bottom. As I pounded her pussy, she met me stroke for stroke.

"Hell, yeah. Fuck me hard," Mona screamed.

I usually liked it when a woman talked dirty to me while I fucked her, but something about Mona threw me off. Even as homely as she was, it was obvious she was getting hers somewhere. Her pussy was as loose as a goose. Far as I knew, she had no children, so having kids hadn't caused her pussy to be wide as the Grand Canyon. None of this mattered to me, it was just that I like to know who and what I was dealing with at all times.

I met her at a party on the Detroit Princess River Cruise. She presented herself to me as an intelligent yet laid back person. She didn't seem like the type of person who could deep throat my dick. This broad was a straight-up freak.

After what seemed like twenty minutes of pounding her pussy from behind, I pulled out of her. I had to admit, I wasn't used to a woman taking the kind of punishment I was giving her pussy without any hesitation. The bitch was actually moaning and begging me to fuck her harder.

I kicked off my Timberlands and slipped off my jeans and underwear, leaving them in a heap on her living room floor.

"Where's your bedroom?" I asked.

She stood and looked over her shoulder at me. She smiled seductively and led me down the hall to what I assumed was her room. She flipped a light switch, and I was shocked to see a huge canopy bed sitting in the middle of the floor. The only other piece of furniture in the room was a narrow dresser.

She stood naked next to the bed, looking from my face to my dick.

"How do you want me, baby?" she asked.

"Lay on your back," I replied.

She moved quickly and sat on the bed. She laid back and spread her legs. She used both of her hands to spread the lips of her shaved pussy. She closed her eyes and began rubbing her clit.

Not wanting to be left out of the fun, I walked over and slid my dick into her pussy. She didn't seem to notice until I hit bottom, which only caused her to moan softly. She moved her legs up into the air and used her hands to hold them on each side of her head.

I grabbed her waist and pulled her to me. I pounded into her hard. Her face twisted in ecstasy.

"Fuck me good. Harder," she screamed at me.

I grabbed her legs and used them to pound into her harder.

"That's it, pound this pussy," she muttered.

Sweat poured down my face and body. An erotic slapping sound could be heard each time I pulled out and slammed back into her hole. She arched her back and bucked up at me wildly.

"I'm cumming, please don't stop. Oh, shit. Fuck me harder," she screamed.

I continued the assault on her pussy while she quivered and convulsed beneath me. I bit my bottom lip and leaned into her and increased the speed of my assault. I angled my hips so that I was hitting the sides of her pussy because her pussy was so loose.

I think she sensed that I wasn't getting any nearer to busting a nut, so she pushed on my chest to get my attention.

"What?" I said with anger in my voice. It was hard enough to concentrate on what I was doing without her interrupting me.

"I don't want you to come yet," she said.

I stood and pulled my dick out of her. She swung her legs around and laid on her back facing me. Her head was hanging off the side of the bed with my dick pointed in her face. She pulled the condom off and took me in her mouth.

I was deep throating her with ease. My whole dick slid in to her mouth down to the hilt. I held on to her head and pounded away. This time when I felt my balls tighten, she clamped her lips down around my dick and applied suction. She swallowed every drop of my cum, sucking my dick clean. Not one drop escaped her lips.

I pulled my limp dick from her mouth and laid across the bed, trying to catch my breath. Mona set up next to me.

"I know you probably got a girl, and tonight you and her probably had an argument or something," she said.

I just looked at her. She was partly right. I had several girls that I fucked on a regular basis, but none of them were my main girl.

"I don't care about that, I just want to fuck you," she continued.

"Yeah right. You say that now, but as soon as you see me with someone else, you'll nut up on me," I replied.

"Trust me, I won't."

"So how is this supposed to work? If you're calling me all the time, my girl is going to find out anyway."

"If you liked tonight, you just call me when you want some more. If I'm available, we'll hook up."

"If you're available? What else are you going to be doing?"

"I have a job, and I belong to organizations that take up my time."

I watched her facial expression while she talked. She seemed to be on the up and up. I wasn't stupid. I knew she wasn't going to be exclusive to me. Her loose ass pussy told me that. I don't like sharing my shit with another man, but she gave a mean blow job.

"I can tell that you like how I suck that big ass dick of yours. The next time you come back, I'll show you some of my other talents," Mona said seductively. "I'll be right back."

Somehow, I knew she wasn't lying. I got the feeling this room wasn't her bedroom. It felt more like a guest room or maybe even a play room. I got up and walked over to the small dresser and opened the top drawer. It contained several dildos in different sizes.

"I planned to show you those the next time you came. If you're up to it we can try them now," Mona said from behind me.

I turned around to face her. She was holding a wash cloth in her hand, and she had a hand towel over her shoulder. She had my jeans and underwear over her forearm and my Timberlands in her other hand.

"You can show me next time," I told her.

She sat my Timberlands down near my feet and stood to lay my jeans and underwear on the bed. She then knelt in front of me and gently washed my dick and my balls with a warm towel and dried me off with the hand towel she had over her shoulder.

"I'll wait for you in the living room," she told me before she stood and walked out of the room.

This chick was strange as hell, but I had to admit she turned me on. It felt as if I had just been serviced. I put my underwear and jeans back on, tucking in my shirt. After I had my Timberlands on, I walked out to find her dressed in a black dress sitting on the couch. She rose from the couch and walked to the door and opened it.

"Let me know when you want to see me again," she said softly.

"Trust, I'm going to hit you back," I told her. I was definitely going to hit her back.

Chapter 11

Muffin

Jazz wasn't in home room. All that I could think was that she wasn't feeling good. She missed class often, but seldom two days in a row. After second hour, I went to my locker to grab my books for my next class. I closed my locker and to my surprise, DeShaun was standing there.

"I meant to get your phone number yesterday, but I kinda forgot to ask," he said.

"Oh, let me give it to you," I told him.

"Can I eat lunch with you today?"

My hands started to shake, and suddenly I couldn't remember my cell phone number.

"Sure," I said.

Once I remembered my phone number, I wrote it on a piece of notebook paper and handed it to him.

Deshaun looked at the piece of paper and smiled his crook smile. "I'll see you at lunch." I watched him walk away with an easy swagger that told everyone walking near him that he was all that and a bag of chips. I had no idea what that felt like, but if he ate lunch with me again today, I was sure I would at least walk a lot lighter.

My next two classes crept by slowly. I was sure it didn't help that I kept watching the clock. I couldn't wait to sit at the same table with DeShaun. I know I wasn't officially his girlfriend or anything, but the girls at school were going to be mad jealous of me. If Jazz was at school, she would be all in my face by now, trying to tell me how DeShaun wasn't all that. I couldn't wait to see her. I intended to let her know that I knew what she did.

I walked into the lunch room and grabbed a tray at the door and headed for the food counter. I filled my tray with food and headed to the register. I handed the lunch attendant my school ID and looked around the room to see if DeShaun had arrived yet. It seemed like out of nowhere he appeared.

"Hey, gorgeous," he said.

"Hi," was all I managed to say.

He reached down and grabbed my tray and said, "I got this for you."

I walked behind him toward a table in the corner of the cafeteria. Even though I was used to people staring at me, this time it was different. I was nervous and giddy. People were watching me because the finest guy in the school was carrying my tray.

We sat down at the table facing each other; I could tell he was just as nervous as I was although I couldn't imagine why. Girls threw themselves at him every day as he walked down the hall in school. At the football games, it was even worse. One time, I saw this girl flash him her boobs on the sideline. I was glad he was interested in me, but what plagued me was why.

"I like your hair down like that," Deshaun said.

"Thank you," I replied and then ate a potato chip.

"Hi DeShaun, why are you sitting over here," Diamond Price said. She was one of the stuck-up girls who hung out with six other girls who liked to tease anyone they felt didn't dress as well as them.

"What do you mean? I'm eating my lunch," DeShaun replied.

"I can see that, I'm just trying to figure out why you're sitting with the librarian."

The girls she hung with were now all standing behind her, making faces at me.

"Look, Diamond, take your fake ass back over there with your fake ass friends and get the fuck out of my face," DeShaun said. He stood and looked down on Diamond and her group menacingly.

"Excuse me, I guess it's help the needy week," she said. All her girls laughed.

I looked around the cafeteria and realized that everyone was looking at our table and whispering. I liked DeShaun, but I wasn't trying to get into it with Diamond and her girls. I wasn't afraid to fight, but they were known for jumping girls and messing up their faces.

"I can go sit somewhere else," I told DeShaun.

"Naw, you're fine just where you are. Diamond was just about to crawl back into the hole she came out of," he said. The look he gave Diamond was scary.

Her facial expression changed from antagonistic to confusion. It was obvious she wasn't used to guys treating her like this. Without saying a word, she turned and walked away. Her gang of girls followed her.

"Look, if that's your girl or something, I can go. I don't want to cause any trouble," I said.

"I like you, I told you that yesterday. As a matter of fact, I've been diggin' you for a while. I'm still mad at myself for not saying something to you last year instead of asking your girl to hook us up. Don't let them hoes bother you."

His words sound sincere, but Diamond had a reputation I couldn't ignore. Even if he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend, and we just went to the prom, I was now a moving target. The first chance Diamond got she would be all over me.

He reached across the table and grasped my hand. He gently turned my hand over and examined it.

"Your hands are tiny," he said.

I don't know why, but I blushed. Looking at my hand in his, I realized that next to him, my five-foot-two frame was tiny.

"Where's your next class?" he asked.

"Second floor, room two forty. I have US Government," I told him.

"Are you done eating?"

"Yes," I replied. I was so nervous, I barely took three bites of my food.

He took both of our trays and placed them on the conveyor belt and then reached down and picked up my books. With his other hand, he grabbed my left hand and lightly pulled me toward the line that had formed at the door. He walked out of the cafeteria with me in tow. We walked hand in hand down the hall toward the stairwell. When we reached my classroom door, he stopped at the door and handed me my books.

"Meet me at your locker after school, okay," he told me.

"Okay," I said.

When school was over, I waited at my locker for DeShaun like he said. The halls were almost empty when he finally appeared with two of his football buddies. They were laughing and talking among themselves. The thought that Deshaun Mitchell liked me made me plaster a smile on my face.

"You ready to go?" DeShaun asked me.

"Um, I guess so," I replied. I wasn't sure where we were going, but I didn't want to seem stupid in front of his friends.

He reached down and grabbed my book bag and slung it over his broad shoulders. He looked down into my eyes and smiled at me and grabbed my hand.

"I'll holla at you fellas later," he yelled over his shoulders.

We walked down the hall and out the side door to the parking lot in silence. When we got to his yellow GT, he opened the passenger door and threw my book bag in the back seat. He motioned for me to get in.

I looked in his face to see if his face would show his intentions. I had never ridden in a car with a boy before. I had heard stories about people going to Forrer Park to make out in the back seats of cars. I liked DeShaun, but I had no intentions of making out with him. I was still trying to figure out if he really liked me or not.

I decided to get in. If he took me to Forrer Park, I could always walk home. It was only seven or eight blocks from my house. The nice thing about living on Winthrop Street was that it was like one big family. No matter what, if I could make it to Winthrop between Puritan and Fenkell, I was safe. All I had to do was scream my heart out and somebody would come.

"What street you live on?" DeShaun asked loudly over the music that played.

"Winthrop Street, off of Puritan," I yelled back. The closer we got to my street the more relieved I was. I knew it might start some trouble with my uncle if he saw me getting out of a guy's car, but I was willing to take that chance. At least DeShaun was my age and went to my school. Plus, Nana said I could start having company when I turned sixteen, and now I was seventeen about to be eighteen. I had no plans to invite DeShaun in the house though.

As soon as I got in the house, I was going to call Aunt Mattie and tell her about DeShaun. I just needed her to agree that it was all right for me to start dating and having company over. Then hopefully my uncle wouldn't give me a hard time about it. Plus, it would only be for a few months and then I would be off to college.

DeShaun pulled up in front of the house after I gave him the address. We both sat there saying nothing while his sound system played loudly. I saw the curtains move in the front window, and I felt a little sick to my stomach.

I had no idea if DeShaun planned on kissing me or not, but I knew I would be in trouble if he did. To make matters worse, I had never kissed anyone before, but I was hoping today I would get my first one no matter what my uncle did to me afterwards.

My heart seemed to skip a beat when he turned down the music. When our eyes met, I felt my body tremble a little. The look on his face made me nervous. He reached a hand out and pulled my face toward him and then our lips touched.

I was expecting to feel warm and excited like in my fantasies, but he pressed his lips hard against mine, and then he forced his tongue into my mouth. I wasn't sure how to respond. His tongue just seemed to stab in and out of my mouth without purpose. He finally pulled away and said, "I'll call you when I get home."

"Okay," was all I manage to say. I grabbed my book bag and got out of his car. As soon as the door was closed, he pulled off. I was surprised he didn't wait to see if I got in the house. I stood there watching his car speed off down the street.

"Muffin," I heard Mrs. Mims' voice call out from the house next to ours.

"Hi, Mrs. Mims," I replied.

"Come here a minute, I got a cake for you."

I walked over knowing she had more than a cake for me. It was more like a stern speech about boys. When I reached her door, she held it open for me to come in. I walked in and stood near her sofa and waited. Mrs. Mims was a short wide lady with salt and pepper hair that she wore in four fat braids that stretched to the tops of her shoulders. Her home reminded me of my Nana; it was warm and cozy with pictures and whatnots here and there.

She walked past me into the kitchen and came back out with a chocolate cake on a plate in one hand and box of Saran Wrap in the other. She stopped at her dining room table and wrapped the cake with care before she handed it to me.

"I just made it this morning. It's got plenty of butter in it, so it should be good and moist," she told me.

"It looks delicious. Thank you," I replied.

"How you and that uncle of yours getting along?"

"We are getting along okay."

"Just okay. Should be better than okay," she said and sucked her teeth. "Well, you let me know if you need anything. Your grandmother was my friend, and I told her I would look after you if anything ever happened. You let me know if you need anything."

Big E, Mrs. Mims' oldest son, stepped out of a room to my right and leaned against the door jam.

"What's up Muff?" he said to me in a deep gruff voice.

"Hey, E," I replied.

When I was little, I had a crush on him, but now he was more like the big brother I never had.

He looked at me with a serious expression on his face and then nodded in reply. Without another word, he turned and went back into the room. He was the strong silent type. Everyone on the block had mad respect for him and his brother. Nobody messed with them or anyone else who lived on Winthrop Street for that matter. They were known for beating a negro down. I had even heard that when they found out this guy that moved in down the street was a pedophile, he disappeared after a little girl said he was offering her candy to come in his house.

"I see you done got yourself a boyfriend," Mrs. Mims said.

"Yes, Ma'am," I replied. I knew the lecture was about to begin.

"You just be careful. Your grandmother raised you to know what's right and what's wrong. Just remember what she told you, and you'll be all right."

Mrs. Mims walked over and gave me a hug. I wanted to hold on to her and never let go. It felt so good to be held like my Nana used to hold me. When she let go, I felt cold even though it was unseasonably warm outside.

I left Mrs. Mims' house and headed home, saying a prayer in my head. I prayed that my uncle wouldn't act like an idiot and fly off the handle because a guy gave me a ride home and kissed me.

To my surprise, my uncle was sitting in the living room watching television. I walked by the entrance of the living room quickly and headed to my room.

Just as I put my foot on the first step to head upstairs, I heard my name.

"Muffin," Pumpkin said.

"Yes," I yelled from the bottom of the steps.

"There are some pork chops in the refrigerator. You need to cook them tonight before they go bad."

"Just let me go and change my clothes, and I'll cook them."

"Let me know when they're ready."

After the food was done, I yelled out to Pumpkin that the food was ready. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I turned around and he was standing right behind me.

He walked past me and fixed himself a plate and then walked over to the kitchen table and set down.

"Are you going to eat?" Pumpkin asked.

I walked back into the kitchen and fixed myself a plate. It was obvious that he wanted me to sit down and eat with him. I walked to the opposite end of the table and sat down.

"I see you gotta boyfriend. When you gonna introduce him to your family?" Pumpkin asked.

"We just started to date today. I was going to ask you and Aunt Mattie if it was all right for me to have company," I said.

"It's all right with me. What's this dude's name?"

"DeShaun. He asked me to go to the prom with him."

"He's in high school?"

"Yes."

I became confused when my uncle slammed his fork down and walked out of the kitchen. I hurried and cleared the table before he came back with a belt or something.

While I was putting the dishes in the sink, I heard the front door open and close. I walked into the living room and looked out the window and saw my uncle walking down the street.

I sat down on the couch and watched him walk all the way to the corner and turn. I wasn't sure what he was mad about, but I knew it wasn't going to be good for me.

I hurried into the kitchen and finished the dishes. I cleaned up the house, vacuuming the carpet and spraying air freshener. The house smelled like a bar because of the cigarettes and liquor bottles my uncle left all over the living room. I made a mental note to pick up some plug-ins the next time I went to the store. When I was done, I headed upstairs to start on my homework. I hadn't made it all the way up the stairs when I heard someone knocking on the front door like a crazy person.

When I got close enough to the door so that the person on the other side could hear what I was saying, I yelled, "Who is it?"

"It's me, Jazz. Open up, girl, I need to talk to you."

I took a deep breath and opened the door. I wasn't ready to talk to her yet, but I guess now was as good of a time as any.

"Why you ain't been answering your phone?" Jazz said as she pushed past me. "I've been calling forever."

"I've been busy with work and school," I replied.

"Girl, I just found out I'm pregnant."

"I thought you were taking those shots so you couldn't get pregnant."

"My mother didn't take me for my last appointment. We been using condoms, but a few times we didn't."

"So, who's the baby's father?"

"I think it's this dude I been messing with name Devon."

"What do you mean, you think?"

"I been messing with this other guy, too, but we usually used condoms. Devon is the one I didn't really use any protection with."

"So, did you tell Devon yet?" I asked her. I sat down on the love seat across from her. She had already made herself comfortable on the couch.

"That's the problem. He cussed me out and said it ain't his. That's when he told me he was married and wasn't trying to hear nothing about me being pregnant." Jazz began to cry.

I wanted to stay mad at her and tell her she got what she deserved, but I couldn't find it in my heart to kick her while she was already down. Reluctantly, I went over to Jazz and hug her. The last time she got pregnant her mother took her and got an abortion. I sensed that this time things were different.

When Jazz was calmer, she sat up and said, "My mother told me that I was almost grown now, and she couldn't afford to pay for another abortion. She also told me to ask the guy that got me pregnant to give me the money for an abortion."

"So, are you going to keep the baby?" I asked.

"Hell naw," Jazz replied.

"Did your mother put you out?"

"No, she said I can stay if I get rid of the baby. If I keep the baby, I gotta go when it's born."

"Okay, then what are you going to do?" I asked.

"That's why I've been trying to get you on the phone. I need to borrow some money. I can get an abortion for five hundred dollars, and I know you have at least that much in the bank."

I couldn't believe my ears. Yes, we were friends, but I didn't believe in abortions, and I definitely wasn't about to pay for someone else's. I was trying to think of how to tell her no when I remembered that she had been stabbing me in the back all along.

"How are you going to pay me back?" I asked her.

"Pay you back? All the stuff I've done for you, and you want me to pay you back? I thought you were my girl," Jazz said in a huff.

"All what stuff?" I asked.

"You've been getting your mail at my house for starters."

"All right, but as of yesterday, my statement won't be coming to your house anymore."

Once DeShaun told me what she did, I stopped at the UPS store on Grand River and rented a PO box.

"Yeah, right. And why would you change your address?"

"Because I found out how you've been stabbing me in the back. DeShaun asked me to go to the prom with him yesterday. He said he asked you to pass me a note last year, and you told him I already had a boyfriend."

Jazz's facial expression confirmed that she was guilty. She looked down and bit her lip. She always bits her lip when she was about to lie. I sat back on the love seat and waited to hear what she would say.

"You gonna believe him?" she asked.

"Why shouldn't I? Every time he looked my way, you swore he was looking at you," I replied.

"I didn't tell him you had a boyfriend. I don't know where he got that from."

"What did you do with the note he gave you?"

Jazz bit her lip before she said, "He didn't give me a note. He's just telling you that so he can get in your panties."

"Do you dislike me that much?"

"Girl, you crazy, I can't believe you acting like this because of some dude," Jazz said and then she stood. "If you don't want to give me the money, then just say that, but don't be accusing me of stuff to keep from giving it to me."

"To tell you the truth, Jazz, you're right. I don't want to give you the money. I didn't get you knocked up, and I don't see why I should have to pay for it. If that makes me a bad person, then so be it."

"Fuck you, bitch," Jazz said and started walking toward the front door.

"Tell the truth for once, Jazz. That's how you've always felt about me, isn't it?" I yelled after her.

Jazz stopped on the porch and turned around to face me. The hatred I saw in her eyes told me exactly how she felt.

"Naw, I don't like your stuck up holier than thou ass. Trust me, you ain't no better than me. After DeShaun fucks your ass and dumps you, I'll be laughing at you."

Jazz walked off my porch and down the street toward Fenkell. I didn't want to give her last statement any weight, but I had to wonder if she might be right. The only thing that made me feel better was the fact that I had no intentions of giving my virginity to DeShaun. The man I planned to give myself to would love me as much as I loved him. I liked DeShaun, but I definitely wasn't in love with him.

I went back in the house and locked the door behind me. I headed upstairs to finally finish my homework and get some rest. It felt good standing up for myself. I hated that I was losing the only friend I had, but it was time I stopped letting people push me around.

If Jazz showed up at school tomorrow it was going to be a rough day. She wasn't going to take my dissing her lightly. It wasn't beneath her to resort to fighting. I guess I would just have to wait and see how she acted tomorrow.

Chapter 12

Pumpkin

It appeared that my little niece was just like her mother, a little slut. How many guys was she dating? I had to leave the house when she said the guy was in high school. She could be lying, but for some reason, I believed her. I just didn't expect a high school dude to have a fly ass mustang.

The only reason I said I didn't mind her having a boyfriend was because I thought it was the guy in the BMW, just driving a different car. I hoped like hell Aunt Mattie told her she couldn't date. It was obvious she was running hot since my mother was gone.

I left the house so that I wouldn't slap the taste out of Muffin's mouth. After she said the guy was taking her to the prom, all I could think of was my sister and how she got knocked up prom night. The only difference was my mother was gone, and I definitely wasn't taking care of a baby. Maybe Aunt Mattie would jump in and help out, but she would definitely have to get out.

When I made it around the corner to the house I usually got my shit from, there was a guy getting his ass kicked in the front yard. I kept my distance and waited for it to be over.

"Don't you bring your ass around here again talking about hook you up," a large guy with a backwards baseball cap said. I had never seen him before, and I was hoping he was the new guy running this spot.

I had planned on getting a little something on credit myself. Black Jack, the guy who usually ran the door knew I was good for it. When the big guy finished kicking the guy on the ground, he spit on him and walked back toward the side of the house. I followed him, being sure to keep my distance. After he went inside, I waited about a minute before I knocked on the door.

"Who is," a voice yelled.

"Pumpkin," I replied.

The door swung open with a whoosh. The big dude from the front yard stood menacingly in the doorway, sizing me up.

"What you want?" he finally asked.

"Is Black Jack here?" I said.

"Naw, Black Jack ain't here."

I looked past him and saw a guy lying on the floor on top of a heap of trash. The guy reminded me of Black Jack.

"I'll come back tomorrow when Black Jack is here," I told him, backing up at the same time.

I jumped when I bumped into someone standing behind me. When I turned, there was a dude standing there with his arms crossed. He was twice the size of the guy who opened the door.

"Excuse me, brother," I said as politely as I could. I definitely didn't want any trouble from these two.

"How much money you got on you, little man?" the dude in the doorway asked.

"I don't have any money. I just wanted to talk to my man Black Jack about something personal," I said, hoping that they would believe me.

The guy standing behind me pushed me against the side of the house and started checking my pockets.

"He ain't got shit," he told the guy in the door.

"I still should kick his ass. You came over here thinking you was going to get some shit on credit, didn't you?" the guy in the doorway said.

He opened the screen door and stepped out and looked me up and down. His partner stepped back to give him some room. That's when I saw my chance, and I took off running through the backyard. When I got to the fence, I jumped over it as quickly as I could without looking back. I ended up in the backyard of a neighbor on Winthrop Street. I hurried through her gate and headed home.

Once I was inside, I noticed Muffin had cleaned up the living room. I looked on the side of couch, praying she hadn't poured out the beer I bought that morning. Thankfully, it was still there. I grabbed it and quickly downed it even though it was warm as piss.

I had heard from a buddy of mine that there was a war going on in the streets, but I had no idea how bad it was. I wasn't sure who Black Jack worked for, but once he found out that his spot had been taken over by another group, it was going to be hell to pay.

Chapter 13

Muffin

Jazz didn't come to school for the rest of the week. I went to class as usual and did my work. The only thing that was different was the fact that I was on DeShaun's arm, and I didn't have to catch the bus to work or home from school anymore. DeShaun and I had talked every night since he gave me a ride home. I was happy to find out that he wasn't a dumb jock. He shared his plans for the future with me and I did the same. The more we talked the more excited I became about going to the prom with him.

I couldn't wait to go dress shopping with Aunt Mattie. Saturday seemed to be taking forever to come.

When Saturday finally arrived, Aunt Mattie drove to every dress shop she could find until we finally found a beautiful lavender dress that she felt was perfect. It was off the shoulders with sequins at the bodice. The gown was floor length with a small train. It was simple yet elegant. The only problem was the price. I had set a budget of three hundred dollars for the dress and another hundred dollars for the shoes and purse. My dream dress was seven hundred dollars. I guess Aunt Mildred could tell something was wrong by my facial expression when I saw the price tag.

"That dress is perfect. What's the matter?" Aunt Mattie asked.

"I know, I really like it, but it cost too much," I replied.

"How much is it?"

"It's seven hundred dollars. I've got one more dress to try on. Maybe it's cheaper."

I turned and walked back into the dressing room to change into a backless blue dress. When I walked out of the dressing room, my aunt and the sales lady took a look at me in the new dress and shook their heads.

"I don't care for that," my aunt said.

I stepped in front of the three-way mirror to see for myself. It didn't look bad, but because it was fitted at the hips, my butt looked enormous. The purple dress fit snug at the bust, with a drop waist and a full skirt.

I gathered the skirt of the dress and turned to go change. I tried as hard as I could to keep the tears that were threatening to fall at bay. My only other option was to go to David's Bridal. Maybe they had something nice within my budget.

I put my clothes on and left the dressing room with the three dresses I had tried on over my arm. My aunt was at the counter talking in a hushed voice to the salesperson and another lady.

"Where do you want me to hang these?" I asked.

"I'll take those," the sales woman said.

"Muffin," Aunt Mattie said, "the lady said she can take twenty five percent off the lavender dress you tried on. Then it will only cost five hundred and twenty-five dollars. How much were you going to spend on your dress?"

"Three hundred dollars," I replied.

"That's fine, I'll pay the rest. I'll also take care of the cost of alterations."

I threw my arms around my aunt's neck and hugged her.

"Thank you, Aunt Mattie," I screamed.

I was so excited. Prom couldn't come fast enough. I was going to look fabulous for the prom. I couldn't wait to get home and tell Jazz about my new dress. Then it hit me. I wasn't friends with Jazz anymore.

I had no one to share my miseries with, so I shouldn't have been surprised that once something nice happened in my life, I had no one to share the good news with either.

Chapter 14

Boom

Life was good, my money was flowing, and I had managed to rent a loft on the riverfront with the help of a real estate agent named Kelly Owens. I met Kelly at a club downtown, and she liked my sex game so much that she arranged everything, including pay stubs showing I made sixty thousand dollars a year. I had thought about making her my number one girl. I could definitely use someone who could make shit happen in my camp, but she had too much baggage.

At first look, she was a classy little chick with a banging body and all, but she had four kids and I wasn't trying to play daddy. I didn't have a problem being a father, but the kids were going to need to be mine.

Don't get me wrong, I tore her off swell when she came through with the keys to the loft. I gave her five thousand dollars for her time and took her to the Wolfgang Puck restaurant at the MGM casino for dinner. After dinner, I had planned to drop her off at her house full of kids, but she kept flirting with me all through dinner. Several times she put her foot in my lap and played with my crotch, so I decided to give her what she wanted.

"You know you're playing with fire," I told her.

"Let me know when I'm about to get burned," she replied.

She looked at me seductively and licked her lips. That was all I needed.

"Check please," I said, waving my hand in the air, trying to get someone's attention.

I am not easily embarrassed. For the most part, I could give a fuck less what another person thought about me. As long as they didn't fuck with my money flow, it was all good, but this chick was off the chain.

She was calm at the MGM hotel desk while she rented a room for us, but once we were in the elevator heading to the room, she went straight for the zipper of my pants. I didn't care that someone might get on the elevator; my concern was that we were in a casino hotel and they taped everything you did outside of your room.

Like a pro, dropped to her knees and had my shit in her mouth before I could object. When I was a teenager, I couldn't get a bitch to suck my dick for nothing; now I couldn't get them to stop. On cue the doors opened on the seventh floor, and a middle-aged white couple stepped on the elevator. I had to physically push the bitch off my shit to get her to stop so I could zip my pants up. She wasn't embarrassed a bit. She got up off the floor and stood next to me like nothing had ever happened. She even smiled at the couple. I like a freak just like the next brother, but damn.

Once we arrived at our room, I no longer wanted to fuck her like I did in the restaurant. My dick had gone soft after her little escapade in the elevator. I guess she could feel the change in my mood and decided to try sucking my dick again.

I'm a nigga twenty-four seven, so I did what every nigga I knew would do, I let her suck my dick until it got hard. Once I was up and ready, I pulled my dick out of her mouth and stood.

"On your knees," I told her.

"Let me take my...," she tried to say as she stood.

"I didn't tell you to take shit off. Get on your knees."

She looked at me strangely for a moment, then got down on all fours on the floor in front of me and looked back over her shoulders. I could tell that she was dying for me to fuck her.

I guess I had been with Mona a little too much because I was starting to get into the sadistic shit. I stepped out of my pants and boxers, leaving my Timberlands on. I grabbed a condom from my back pocket before I tossed my jeans on the bed. I walked around to the front of her and knelt in front of her. She smiled at me and reached for my swollen dick.

After she had my shit so hard it was starting to hurt, I pulled my dick out of her mouth and said, "Turn that ass around so I can see it."

Kelly turned around quickly, pulling her skirt up as she went. Once her ass was facing me, I reached out and yanked her panty hose hard enough to tear them into shreds. She yelped in response.

I moved the material covering her pussy to the side and stuck two fingers inside of her. She was dripping wet. I pushed my fingers in and out her while she bucked.

I smiled as she bobbed her pussy on my hand. I loved a wet pussy.

"Oh, shit. I think I'm cumming," she moaned.

I immediately snatched my fingers out of her, leaving her fucking the air feverishly. She finally looked back and said, "Please don't stop."

"You want me to fuck you?" I asked.

"Yes, fuck me please."

I rolled on the condom and shoved my fat dick into her pussy. Unlike Mona, her shit was nice and snug. I started pounding in and out of her, making her scream out my name. After she started talking incoherently, I grabbed her by the waist and pulled her legs off the floor and positioned them behind me.

She looked like she was about to do pushups, until I started pulling her back toward my dick with lightning speed. She collapsed on the floor and took the pounding. When I finally felt my nut approaching, I pushed into her hard, causing her to scream out, "Yes, fuck me harder. That's it. Work that dick, motherfucker."

I love it when a woman talked dirty. I slammed into her harder and harder as I shot my load. When I was spent, I pulled out of her and fell back on the bed.

After Kelly's oral performance and her juicy ass pussy, Kelly had just been added to my growing stable of women. All of the women in my life were freak as hell, just like I liked them.

I had one more in mind for my stable. Little Miss Muffin. I just had to approach her the right way. She seemed to be inexperienced, but I planned to change all of that once I got my hands on her.

Chapter 15

Muffin

Senior year was exciting but expensive. Every other day there was an announcement that this or that fee was due. My heart hit the floor in Calculus class when the announcement was made that final payment for caps and gowns were due by Friday. It was Tuesday, and I didn't get paid until a week later, and even then, there wouldn't be enough left over to pay for my cap and gown once I paid all the bills that were due at home. I could have asked Aunt Mattie to help out, but she had already done so much for me. Prom was only a few weeks away, and I wanted everything to go right. I decided to dip into my savings.

Looking around the classroom, I had to wonder if any of my classmates had the same or similar problems that I had. I felt small and alone in my worries over money. Everyone except me had on designer clothing of some kind. It was obvious that their worries extended no further than whether or not they would get a car as a graduation present.

DeShaun was waiting for me outside my classroom door. He leaned down and kissed me on the lips gently and then grabbed my hand. We walked to my class as usual, but something was different. He usually didn't kiss me at school, and he had this weird look on his face.

"My boy Carl is having a party on Saturday for his birthday. Would you like to go with me?" Deshaun asked.

I wanted to go, but I had to work Saturday night. That was the first time DeShaun had asked me to go out with him other than the prom. This would be a function where people who went to school with us would see us together outside of school. I knew it was silly, but I was afraid that all of the attention DeShaun was showing me really was an act, and once we were around his friends, he would make a fool of me so that everyone could laugh. With this in mind, I chose my words carefully; after all, prom was only a few weeks away.

"I have to work Saturday, but I'll see if somebody will switch with me when I get to work tomorrow," I told him.

"Yeah, all right," he replied. The expression on his face had changed from pleasant to pissed off.

When school let out, DeShaun drove me home but didn't say a word to me. The ride from Redford High to my house was cold and silent except for the music that blared through the speakers. When he pulled up in front of my house, he turned down the radio and said coldly, "I need to know if you're going to my boy's party with me or not. So let me know as soon as possible."

"I'll let you know as soon as I get home from work tomorrow night," I assured him.

DeShaun leaned over and gave me his usual rough kiss, followed by the tongue assault. Gone was the gentle kiss he had given me in the hallway today.

I looked over my shoulder as I walked up the sidewalk to the front door. DeShaun hadn't driven off like he usually did. That day he was looking at me with anger in his eyes. Even though the thought of him humiliating me loomed in the air, I was going to need to go to the party with him on Saturday, even if I had to call off work. I needed to know before the prom if he really liked me or if it was all a game.

I grabbed the mail out of the mailbox before I went in the house. My heart felt like it was going to jump right out of my chest when I saw the envelopes with Wayne State University and Eastern University on them. I was too afraid to open them just yet. I clutched them to my chest and ran up the stairs to my room.

I laid back on my bed and stared at the envelopes before I ripped into them. Both were acceptance letters. I read them both over twice before I grabbed my cell phone and called my aunt.

She yelled and screamed in the phone like she had just won the Mega Millions lottery drawing. When we both calmed down, I told her the best part.

"I received a full ride scholarship to Eastern and a partial scholarship from Wayne State. Either way I would be able to afford to go to either college because I was eligible for financial aid. I still haven't heard from my first choice, University of Michigan. That's the one I really want to go to."

"You'll get in that one, too. Your grandmother would be so proud of you. Make sure you write to your mother and let her know how well you're doing. I know that would lift her spirits," Aunt Mattie replied.

My mother had been denied early parole because she had gotten into a fight with another inmate. It appeared she would have to finish the last five years of her ten-year sentence. Upon learning her parole was denied, she tried to cut her wrist and was placed on suicide watch.

I hung up the phone and sifted through the rest of the mail. I reached in my book bag to grab a pen to write return to sender on an envelope that was address to Nana. I paused when I realized it was from an insurance company. I opened the letter and studied the three hundred and twenty-eight-dollar bill from AARP. Not sure if it was for health insurance or life insurance, I called the eight hundred number at the top of the letter.

After I gave the person on the phone the policy number, she confirmed for me that this was for a life insurance policy. Apparently, my grandmother paid this policy by the year, and now it was due again.

"Caroline Walters died last year," I told the lady.

"I am sorry to hear of her passing. Please accept my condolences. I will have an insurance claim form mailed out to you. Please complete it and mail it back with a certified copy of her death certificate."

"Can you tell me how much the policy is for and who the beneficiary is?"

"Unfortunately, we can't, but the letter will be address to the beneficiary."

My mind was racing. My uncle never really looked at the mail, but if I was the beneficiary, I had to make sure he didn't know. I had no idea how much the policy was for, but if it was as much as the policy we used to bury her, I would be set for college. It was really important to me to get straight A's in college, just like I did in high school. Even though I was managing to keep my grades up while I worked at McDonald's, I wasn't sure I would be able to manage it once I got to college if I had to work, too. If the policy was at least ten thousand dollars, working wouldn't be an issue.

I thanked the lady for her assistance and ended the call. I headed downstairs to Nana's room, passing my uncle in his usual location, drunk on the living room couch. I opened the door to her room as quietly as I could and slipped inside, closing the door behind me. I looked in her closet first, hoping to find the original insurance policy.

When she died, my aunt Mattie had gone through her things or so I thought and found the policy we used to bury her with. Now I wondered if Aunt Mattie had just stopped looking when she found an insurance policy.

I looked through several hat boxes on the top shelf and found nothing but her beautiful church hats. The shoe boxes on the floor contained mostly shoes, except one. This box had report cards, awards, and school pictures for my mother, uncle, and myself. I placed it back in the closet with the rest of her shoes and leaned forward to get up and hit my head on hooks in the back of her closet, knocking down several purses. I grabbed the purses and opened them, hoping they had some of her papers in it, but they were empty. I was still happy that I had decided to check because I found a twenty-dollar bill in the zipper section of one of the purses.

I had only seen my uncle go in my Grandma's room once since she had died and even then, he only stood in the doorway and cried. If Uncle Pumpkin had known that there was money in here, he probably would have ripped it apart.

By the time I finished going through each purse, I had found almost two hundred dollars. I stuffed the money in my bra and put the purses back where I found them. I proceeded to my grandma's night stand and found all sorts of papers. I had been looking for almost an hour when I found a large brown envelope from an attorney's office. Inside the envelope was a blue folder with gold letters engraved on it that read Last Will and Testament. I placed the folder on the bed and continued looking through the last few papers.

My breath caught in my throat when I saw a large folder labeled AARP. I whispered "Thank you" softly when I discovered that I was named as beneficiary and the face value of the policy was twenty-five-thousand dollars. I felt relieved and grateful, not just because of the amount of money I was about to receive, but because my grandma had looked out for me.

I returned everything to its original location except the AARP folder and the Will and headed for the door. I opened it slowly and checked to see if my uncle was still out cold. Thankfully he was.

Once I was upstairs, I sat on the bed and read through my grandma's will. I was shocked to find out that she had left everything to me. Suddenly I felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. I no longer had to worry about my uncle putting me out if he ever got mad at me. I also had several decisions to make. Would I allow my uncle to continue to stay in my house or would I put him out? I now had to decide if I wanted to stay at home and commute to college or stay on campus so that I could experience real college life.

That was the first time since my Nana died that I felt like a teenager, I could actually go shopping and buy myself some nice clothes and shoes without wondering if I would be able to eat. Like the teenager that I was, I was entertaining the thought of splurging on a car. I remember thinking that I needed to take driver's training so I could get a driver's license. Life was definitely looking up for me then.

Chapter 16

Muffin

When I got to work, I went directly to my manager and asked him if I could have Saturday off and of course he said no.

"The only thing I can suggest is try to get someone to work for you," he said.

I pulled out my cell phone and called Kawana. I had worked for her two times, so she owed me.

"Hey girl. What's up?" Kawana asked.

"Everything is cool. I just need to ask you for a favor. Can you work for me this Saturday night?" I said.

"I know I owe you for all the times you covered for me, but I can't. I'm going to a party."

"I understand. Enjoy the party."

I felt like crying. How was I going to tell DeShaun I wasn't going to the party? I shoved my cell phone in my pocket and grabbed my hat and badge out of my book bag. When I walked out of the breakroom, I almost walked into Jazz.

"I'll work for you Saturday," she said as I stepped around her to go clock in.

"You will?" I replied.

"Yeah, I will."

"I'll tell James so we can fill out the sheet to switch shifts," I told her.

"You don't have to work a shift for me," Jazz said.

We were face to face in the back of the restaurant, and her face told me nothing. For several weeks, she had ignored me at school and at work. Now here she was offering to work shifts for me with nothing in return. Jazz wasn't the giving type, so I knew something was up.

I wanted to ask her what her game was, but I really needed her to cover for me Saturday. As long as she signed the paper agreeing to work my shift, I didn't care if she called in.

"Um, thank you," I told her.

I walked away, happy my shift was covered but sad that I couldn't accept an act of kindness from my ex best friend without questioning her motives.

Worst of all, I would soon have enough money to buy myself some fly clothes; I would have to go shopping alone. In the past I had avoided shopping trips with Jazz because I couldn't afford to buy name brand items like she did. The few times I did go, she or her mother would buy me something so I wouldn't feel bad being the only one without a bag. I appreciated their generosity, but it always made me feel small. Financially, my future was looking up, but emotionally I felt bankrupt.

I hurried to the bathroom to call DeShaun and let him know that I would be able to go to the party with him. He sounded excited, but I had this feeling I was going to wish that I had gone to work and made some money.

The rest of my shift was normal. From time to time, Jazz and I made eye contact, but we would both look away. It was obvious that we really needed to talk to each other and clear the air, but neither of us appeared to know what to say to the other. It probably should have been me to start the conversation since she was nice enough to cover my shift for me on Saturday, but deep down inside, I was still angry. I still felt betrayed.

After my shift was over, I grabbed my coat and hurried to the bus stop. Uncle Pumpkin usually wasn't home when I got there, but I didn't want a repeat performance of him hitting me.

"Muffin, wait up," I heard Jazz yell out behind me.

I turned around to see what she wanted. She rushed up to me out of breath and said, "Can we talk?"

I suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe. Even though I knew we needed to talk, I couldn't imagine what she could possibly have to say to me other than to admit how sorry she was.

I hadn't talked to Jazz in over a month. At school, she walked pass me without speaking. The day she finally came to school after our argument, I tried to say hello, but she turned her head and kept going, so I let it go. On other occasions, she rolled her eyes at me, especially when she saw me in the cafeteria sitting with DeShaun. What did she want now?

"For what? I tried to speak to you in class, but you treated me like a bald headed step child," I replied.

"I know. Look my mother talked to me last night, and she said we've been friends too long to fall out over some boy."

I had to admit, I did miss her. She was the only friend I had. DeShaun was cool and all, but you can't tell your boyfriend things you can tell your best friend. Things like, even though DeShaun is fine as hell, he sucks as a kisser.

"Are you going to forgive me or what? I forgive you," Jazz told me.

"I didn't do anything. What are you forgiving me for?" I asked.

"Can't things just go back to the way they used to be? If we start pointing fingers, talking about who did what to who, it'll only make it worst."

I had to agree with Jazz on that part. I couldn't help but wonder what really made her decide to come make up with me. Jazz could hold a grudge forever. I knew firsthand how big of a hard ass she could be, but right now I had to admit, I really missed her.

"Okay, Okay. I forgive you," I told her.

She jumped up and down, throwing her arms around my neck and squeezing me so hard I could barely breathe. When she finally let go, she grabbed my hand and starting walking toward the bus stop.

"You know my bus will be here in a minute?" I said to her.

"I know. My mom is going to pick me up from your house. I told you she said we needed to talk," Jazz replied.

"But what if we didn't make up?"

"You know we've been friends too long to stay mad at each other."

We had been friends a long time, but what she did was really foul. I felt the anger rise up in me again, but the bus pulled up. I pushed the anger down. I forced a smile to appear on my face.

On the bus ride to my house, Jazz filled me in on all the gossip at school. Without Jazz, I had no idea what was really going on around Redford High School. Her idol chatter was refreshing. I missed her more than words could express. Since my grandma died, I slowly learned that people saw me as book smart but street dumb, but what they didn't know was that I had been paying attention, and I knew more than anyone realized.

When we got to my house, I fixed us some sandwiches and made a pitcher of red Kool-Aid. We sat at the kitchen table and just talked. Finally, I asked her the question that had been on the tip of my tongue since the last time she came to see me.

"What did you do about the baby?" I asked.

"I got rid of it. The other guy I was messing with gave me the money to have the abortion," she replied.

"Did it hurt?"

"Yeah, it hurt," Jazz said. She stared straight in my eyes. I could tell she was trying not to cry.

"Are you still going to prom?" I asked to change the subject.

"Of course, I'm still going," she replied gleefully.

That was Jazz for you. Her moods would change right before your eyes.

Jazz hung out with me for over two hours before her mother called and told her she was outside to pick her up. I watched her get into her mother's Ford Explorer, waving at me like nothing had ever happened between us.

It was true that I had forgiven her, but I was never going to forget her treachery. I would be a fool to think that she wouldn't do it again. The next time she came for me it probably wouldn't be over a guy, but I knew the potential was there. I just hoped that the next time I would see it coming.

Chapter 17

Boom

I made my rounds, checking my spots and collecting my money in my old beat up Dodge Stratus. I drove that raggedy piece of shit so that I would be low key. I kept a mental count in my head of how much money I had collected, and when I reach thirty thousand, I stopped at my uncle's house in Southwest Detroit and dropped off the money. Even though it was unseasonably warm for February, I had on an oversized hoody to hide the fact that I had on a homemade money belt with my money in it. I walked past my uncle Pete and yelled a greeting to him as I headed to the second floor to my seldom used room. From time to time, I would come by and spend the night so that the neighbors would get used to my car and think that I actually stayed there.

I stashed the money in a loose floorboard under the bed, checking first to see if the other money I had hidden was still there and untouched. Once I was sure everything was as I had left it, I headed downstairs to talk with my uncle and to leave him a little change for bills and such.

When I headed back out, it was close to six-thirty in the evening, and it was starting to get dark. I usually tried to get out of the streets before it got dark, but I only had one more stop to make and my boy Cyanide was there handling my shit for me.

When I got to the spot to pick up my money, Cyanide told me that the count was short because one of my runners, Peanut, didn't show up with ten large from my spot over on Cherrylawn.

"Man, I called him like four or five times, and he ain't answering. How you want me to handle it?" Cyanide asked.

I usually didn't get my hands dirty, but an example was needed in that situation. Cyanide was watching me closely, waiting for my response. I couldn't show any signs of weakness, or this fool would be all over my shit. In the game, there was always some young fool looking to come up just like I was. Someone had to be stepped on to get to the top, and I wasn't about to let my body be under Cyanide's or Peanut's boot.

"Where is this fool staying?" I asked.

"He lives over on Sussex Street off Thatcher with his girlfriend. We about to go holla at his ass?" Cyanide questioned.

"Definitely."

After all the money was counted and bagged up, I dropped it in my trunk and headed out with Cyanide to find Peanut. It was seven forty-eight when we pulled up in front of Peanut's house and every light in the house was on. His house was the only occupied house on the block. I felt sorry for the fool. There would be no nosy neighbors to call the police, and even if they did, it would have taken hours for the police to show up.

I opened my glove box and pulled out a pair of leather gloves and then reached under the seat and pulled out my Glock and checked the clip before I stepped out of the car. Always ready for whatever, my boy Cyanide already had his gun out.

Cyanide and I went way back. We both grew up poor and broke in the Jefferson Projects off Temple and Grand River. We spent so much time together everyone thought we were brothers even though we looked nothing alike. By high school, we both had dropped out and started selling dime bags of weed off the porch of a vacant apartment. We had each other's backs no matter what back then. He was still my boy, but since we had come up, I saw venom in his eyes from time to time.

Two years ago, I made the suggestion that we try our hand at selling crack. He looked at me and said he wasn't interested. He felt crack was too risky and could get you Fed time. I branched out on my own anyway and started making paper. When he saw me gripping a BMW, he suddenly became very interested. I cut him in on the strength that he was my boy, but I had the connection so that made me top dog. I could tell he didn't like it. When we sold weed, we went fifty-fifty. Don't get me wrong, he was pulling down plenty of money, but I could tell he wanted the power, too.

Cyanide and I walked up on the porch together and stood on each side of the door. I knocked on the front door and waited for someone to answer. After a few moments, a female voice yelled, "Who is it?"

We looked at each other knowing neither of us would be responding. After a few seconds, I knocked again. Again, someone yelled, "Who is it?"

Again, neither Cyanide nor I responded. After a few seconds, I knocked again. I finally got the response we were looking for. The front door swung open, and Peanut leaned forward, yelling, "Who the fuck..."

Before he could finish his sentence, Cyanide grabbed the handle on the aluminum screen door and yanked it open. As soon as the door was open enough for me to get in, I jawed Peanut, knocking him to the floor. His skinny ass girlfriend came running in from a room that looked like a kitchen and screamed.

"Shut the fuck up, bitch, before I put a bullet in your ass," Cyanide told her.

He walked over to her and guided her to an arm chair and trained his gun on her. About the same time, I grabbed Peanut by the shirt and dragged him into the living room and threw him on the couch.

"Where is my money, Peanut?" I asked menacingly.

"I was about to bring it, I just needed to come home and check on my girl," Peanut said through the blood running from his mouth.

"Where is it then?"

"It's in the kitchen," he mumbled. His eyes were darting around the room wildly.

Cyanide grabbed his girl up and told her to show him where the money was. Once they were in the kitchen, Cyanide yelled, "I got it."

"What's taken you so long?" I asked when he hadn't come out of the kitchen right away.

"The money was all over the table like someone threw it up in the air," he replied. "His girl is putting it all back in the bag."

"Oh, you was playing with my money?" I said to Peanut.

"Naw, man, I wasn't playing with your money. It fell out of the bag when I was trying to go see who was at the door."

Peanut looked scared and small. He was a weak boy who couldn't handle his business. I had plans for his dumb ass, but since he had made it clear he wasn't up for the challenge, his employment would be terminated.

"Peanut, look at me," I yelled at him.

When our eyes met, I pulled the trigger and sent that fool to his maker. I wanted him to know I didn't have any remorse about killing his bitch ass. About the same time, his silly ass girl met the same fate in the kitchen.

On the ride back to the spot, I turned up the music and we bopped our heads to the sounds of Biggie Smalls.

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About the Author

Kimmie Thomas is a native Detroiter. She is a writer, teacher, mother, and wife. Her first love has always been reading and writing. She has been motivated by writer such as Donald Goines, Maya Angelou, Zane and E. Lynn Harris. Kimmie has worked as a psychiatric nurse for more than 10 years. She uses her vast knowledge of mental health to make her characters real for her readers.

Other books by Kimmie Thomas

This Side of Crazy

Kingdom Hospital Series

Nursing Dr. Miller

Treating Dr. Miller

Website www.kimmiethomas.com

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