- I don't personally believe, right,
but it's like that doesn't
mean that we can't live
the same life.
(soft acoustic music)
- Hey there I'm Erica Campbell,
I'm a singer, a songwriter,
I'm a mom, a wife, and
all around cool chick.
So today I'm sitting down with
people from different ends
of the faith spectrum.
We're just gonna have
a healthy conversation.
Can't wait to get into
it, I'm really excited.
- My name is Josh and I
am a former Christian.
- Hi, I'm Emily and I
identify as an atheist.
- My name is Nina and
I identify as agnostic.
- I was raised in a very
strict Mormon household.
I was the very first one in
my family to leave the church.
I have been a happy
non-believer ever since.
- I guess technically I was
raised in the Catholic faith,
kind of like default.
We went to church sometimes on Christmas,
usually like weddings or
funerals, something like that.
- I grew up lightly Hindu.
We're like culturally
Hindu but I kind of came
to the conclusion that
whether or not there is a God
or there isn't a God,
it has no bearing on how I live my life.
(soft acoustic music)
- I don't think she'll
be able to in any way
convert me suddenly back.
- I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous.
- I hope I don't say
anything to offend her.
(gentle music)
- Hi.
- Hey there.
- I'm Josh.
- I'm Erica.
- I'm Emily.
- Erica.
- So nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too!
- Hey.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- You're Nina?
- Yes, I'm Nina.
- I'm Erica, nice to meet you.
So I'm a Christian.
How would you identify?
- Atheist.
- Atheist.
- Non-believer.
- So do you believe there's
no God or there's something
out there and you don't know what it is.
- Nothing.
- Nothing. (chuckles)
- I identify as an atheist.
- If agnosticism and
atheism is a spectrum,
I'm somewhere in it.
- I think when we die, it's lights out
and that's the blissful end to all of it.
- Is that bliss though with lights out?
- It is.
- So let me ask you
a question, what do you
believe exists beyond
the universe, like the area
where our minds kind of exist,
not the human, not the tangible.
- I don't think that that exists either.
- You don't?
- I don't.
I think that everything
that exists is what exists
right here, right now, in
this moment, in your body.
- I was raised in the Catholic community.
I just remember the first
thing we talked about
was Adam and Eve and I
just remember being like,
that's just like a little story.
- Culturally we're Hindu.
Personally for me it felt
like a lot of the stories
of it, they're just like stories.
There's a lot of people with multiple arms
and angels are blue,
which is like not real.
- So I was raised Mormon.
My mom helped run the Relief Society,
my dad was a bishop for a long
time, grandpa was a bishop.
I was the very first member of my family
to walk away from it all.
- How'd they respond to that?
- Not well at first. (chuckles)
- I grew up similar to you but mine was a
Pentecostal church called
the Church of God In Christ.
My father was a preacher,
my mom was over the choir.
But there was a lot of
things that didn't always
make sense to me like why we were so poor?
If you live for Jesus,
everything's supposed to
work out right, you know.
But the same way I wouldn't doubt love
because people have gotten love wrong.
That's kinda how I feel about God
and I think it's very
reassuring to me that after
this is over, there's something greater.
So most people who don't believe,
there was some traumatic church experience
or some long line of
this doesn't make sense,
this doesn't make sense.
Okay, y'all don't make sense
so maybe he doesn't make sense.
- I do find fault with
Catholicism in general.
- We're not really practicing
so we weren't praying
or studying or anything
and so I just kinda
fell away from that as a religion.
- I got kicked out of Sunday
school because I was arguing
with the teacher about
the age of the Earth.
Six days, 6,000 years, we're like,
but dinosaurs.
- I grew up in a church where
secular music was a sin.
Everybody was a devil, you know.
You can't interact, it's
gonna infiltrate you.
- My mom, her favorite
saying growing up was
the devil gets to you in little ways.
- Yes.
- Like the first time I wanted
a Mohawk at nine years old--
(Erica chuckling)
She was like,
the devil gets to you through your hair.
I'm like--
- Yeah. (laughs)
- I got really lucky and
I have great parents,
and they were like, be
kind, be a good person.
Help each other out, blah, blah, blah.
So I feel like my moral compass--
- Is good.
- I hope so.
I think so, I'm working on it.
- The core of Mormon
belief is the Holy Bible,
the King James Version specifically.
Every time I read something,
what I saw was a twist
for human gain.
- Mm-hm.
I know the same stories you've had.
I've had the very same questions.
And what I feel like,
what I know the Bible is,
it is all an example of how
crazy and chaotic our world is.
If you believed in God, what
would that look like to you?
- I feel like if there was a God,
I think it would be something
kind of unimaginable
that I couldn't process as a human being.
- Do you believe in life after death?
- You know, I don't.
Before I was like I don't know, maybe,
like we're all energy, what
happens to us when we're dead.
And nobody knows and that's
the crazy thing, right?
But very recently actually my twin brother
passed away this summer.
- I'm sorry.
- And so I've been,
thank you.
But I've been searching for
him and I've been trying to be
kind of open, if it is a thing,
please freakin' talk to
me, you know what I mean?
I haven't felt it, I haven't felt him,
I haven't seen him, and so
that kind of for me was like,
okay he's just dead.
And that's something that
I'm just kind of like, okay.
I'm just never gonna see him again.
He's still with me every
day and I think about him
every single day, but it's like,
I was open for it.
I still am--
- Yeah.
- If something were to happen or whatever,
but me thinking about him
every day and remembering him
and everything that I do, it's like,
I feel like that for
me is enough, you know?
- Every time I look at any
form of organized religion,
the only thing I see is division.
- Mm-hm.
- More wars have been fought
over religion than anything else.
- Yeah.
- Whereas when I look at
a world with no religion, you suddenly,
everyone has to own up
to just what they are
and who they are.
They can no longer hide behind say,
well, I won't bake a
cake for this gay couple
'cause my religion says
that I don't have to.
You can't hide behind that.
- There's always gonna
be conflict in religion
because religion is man-made.
You know you've seen these movies,
there's always a devil on
one shoulder and and angel.
I really think that's real.
I think there's always a
battle for the best of us
and the worst of us.
If there was one question
of God that you could ask
if you believed in God,
what would you ask?
- That's a really hard one (laughs).
- Is it?
Girl, I ask everything.
- There would probably be a
lot of general just like whys?
- But He cares about you and
that's what I know for sure?
- Does He?
- Yes.
You, what makes you
happy, what makes you sad.
- I feel so small and the concept of a God
feels so big like I said.
And I feel so small and
it seems impossible to me
that anything that
oversees our whole world
or our whole universe would
have time for me. (chuckles)
- Absolutely.
I think that there's still
a lot of questions there.
Even from what you said,
still a lot of questions
and I think that's the best
way to be, to always ask why.
The whys of the whys.
Why do I feel this way,
why don't I believe,
could I believe again?
- Right.
- What could cause me to believe again,
'cause clearly there's
something that caused me
not to believe.
If I told you that I would pray for you,
what would you ask me to pray for?
- (sighs) That's a great question.
Probably not for me, but
for my family, I think.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Just for them to be like
well and good and happy.
- From my perspective,
everything you've said,
you can do without any religion,
and it's completely freeing for me.
The most free I ever felt
was the day I walked away,
said I don't have to believe
in any of this stuff anymore,
'cause to me, God, religion, all of it,
it's completely superfluous
to human existence.
You don't need it.
You can live a happy, productive, good,
charitable life without it.
- I believe in there's a
good, there has to be a bad.
We can't always explain
some of the complexities
and craziness of this world
but I think God brings gravity
to it all, to the question.
- I love hearing what you have to say.
I don't think I necessarily
agree with all of it. (chuckles)
- So I believe that God knows
you, he knows your name,
he knows how many hairs are on your head.
You have beautiful hair, by the way.
- Thank you.
- I had to purchase mine.
(Nina laughs)
Nevertheless.
I think he knows everything about you
and wants to know more.
- This has been such a great conversation.
You're such a warm, I feel
really comfortable here.
- (chuckles) Good.
- Yeah, this has been really great.
- Awesome.
- It's been amazing
talking to you.
- Great talking to you, Emily.
I will be praying for you.
- Thank you.
- Absolutely.
- Thank you so much.
(gentle music)
