- I want to tell you my secret
now, I see dead Pokemon.
(upbeat music)
I would say that people describe
me as incredibly talented.
Photosynthesis, photosynthesis.
I'm a master of
kung-fu, TaeKwonDo, Jiu
Jitsu, karate, judo.
What?
What did you say?
All my Pokemon are dead.
All my Pokemon used to be dead.
So yesterday I went to
lunch at this restaurant
and there were so many
things on the menu.
I had no idea what to get
so I asked the waiter,
hey dude what should
I get and he was like
"Ah, you should try
the chicken parm."
And so I decided to
get the chicken parm
but then I got it
and thought oh wait,
I think I might be
allergic to chicken,
or maybe it's the parm.
Have I considered decaf?
I don't drink coffee.
Did you ever know one
of those weird kids
in elementary school
that's always trying
to show you something gross?
That was me.
No, I'm not going
to put on a shirt.
Some people may tell
you that I'm boring,
but I promise you that
investment banking
is a fascinating.
You guys are babies,
it's not that cold.
♪ I've haven't worn a coat
since I was five years old ♪
- Well hello, I've
been expecting you.
Would you like to see a
vision of your future?
Well, what I can
tell you is this,
if you click the thumbs up
button below this video,
it will turn blue.
What?
No, don't want to
work for an evil team.
What do you take me for?
That is such an
offensive assumption.
No, actually yeah, I do,
give me all your Pokemon.
(upbeat music)
What's the opposite
of a sausage fest?
Because that's what this is.
Rock types are so strong.
There is nothing, I mean
nothing tougher than stone.
(upbeat music)
Wrestling, boxing, kick
boxing, mixed martial arts.
Capes are cool. There
is no way for someone
to look uncool doing this.
(screaming)
Heck yeah, I built my own PC.
RTX 2080 graphics card,
overclocked processor,
and 404 gigabytes of RAM.
PC master race bro.
(sighing)
I love sand, it's
so coarse and rough
and irritating and
it gets everywhere.
(upbeat music)
(kissing)
Mortal Combat, Super Smash Bros,
Dragon Ball FighterZ, and
Pokken Tournament...DX.
If you don't mind, I'd like
to take this opportunity
to read you a bit of
poetry that I wrote myself.
I'm very proud of it.
The taste of my lips,
you're on a ride.
I'm toxic, you're
slipping under,
with the taste of
a poison paradise.
You're addicted to me, don't
you know that I'm toxic?
And you love what I do,
don't you that I'm toxic?
(tapping)
I do believe in fairies,
I do believe in fairies,
I do believe in fairies,
I do believe in fair--
So the thing about ice types is.
Oh! Whoa! Oh! Whoa! Oh!
The best defense
is a good defense.
Hey Michael, why is
it so dark in here?
(hissing)
(banging)
I have a fun game, why don't you
tell me your deepest,
darkest secret?
Just kidding, I already know
it and so does your mother.
Lots of people try to say
that Bug Pokemon are weak,
but the truth is that they are.
They really, really are.
(water splashing)
The weather today is beautiful.
The only thing powerful enough
to stop us is ourselves,
and a bit of cold weather and
some small cute pink things.
(deep breathing)
(tapping)
(choking)
You need to see some ID?
Yeah, sure, does a
pilot's license work?
(panting)
We're very balanced type.
I taste nothing.
I love animals, just
regular animals.
(yelling)
(biting)
(upbeat music)
