- [Frank] I told
this boy to quit
leaving this damn door open.
Baby, where they at?
(growling)
Damn, Kim you
didn't cook nothing?
(growling)
What the hell's going on
with all them damn sirens.
Bet you old man Peterson done
fell down the steps again.
(growling)
Bastard.
Look at this shit in here.
Man if I got to cook my own
damn breakfast I swear to
Ooh Shit !
What'd I tell you
about walking up on me?
That's what got your
father knocked out.
What the hell's wrong with you?
You got your mouth
You pregnant again?
(growling)
You trying to turn me into
Chris Brown, I see that.
Kim, don't make me do this.
Baby
man, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
(growling)
(footsteps)
(growling)
(gunshot)
(rock music)
- What's up?
- Kill You
- she
was
all ready
dead
she was dead look.
Stop.
(coughing)
- Man what the hell
is going on Mike?
- You ain't seen the news?
Zombie's biting the
hell out of people.
- Come on with that movie
shit Mike, this is serious.
- Okay, well how do
you explain your wife
excuse me, ex-wife, eating
your son's kidneys and shit?
Then he get up and
try to bite your ass.
- Is that the best way
you could explain that?
What the hell are
you doing here, Mike.
- Yeah, funny you say
that, um I was at my house.
Minding my business when
I noticed your beautiful,
gorgeous bi-racial
angel of a wife
and her ass in the kitchen,
so when I grabbed my
binoculars and lotion,
that's when I saw your wife
start biting your son, a lot.
Uh little man didn't
have a chance.
You ever seen the Discovery
Channel during shark week
when the shark grab on a seal
and bite the shit out of him?
Worst than that, that was
the worse shit I ever seen.
Anyway, by the time
I came over here,
shot your son in the face,
and you started choking me.
And it hurt.
- You don't think
you could of did
any of that just a
little bit sooner?
- Maybe, but first, I
had to wash my hands.
I had to get my
gun, I wasn't coming
over here without my gun,
um what else I had to do?
Had to get my shoes.
I had to find my hat.
- You're not wearing a hat.
- I didn't find my hat,
what else I had did?
I don't
like the way you
looking at me right now.
Why your fists balled up?
Never mind that,
go change clothes.
I think they heard me
shooting your son in the head.
Hurry up, hurry up.
Watch them brains.
I'll clean it up.
Hurry up!
- Shazam! Man it smell like
three week old unwashed ass in
my bad Mike.
Man I didn't know,
wife got bit too?
- No, she didn't get bit.
- Then,
why is she laying dead, man?
- Alright Frank I'm
a be honest man.
- [Frank] Honesty is good.
- I killed this bitch
like two days ago.
This whole zombie apocalypse
thing is perfect timing.
(laughs) You want a beer?
We got beer juice.
- Juice, no I'm good.
- [Mike] Beer
- Can we get an update on
the news or something man?
You gonna invite people over
and it's dead people
and stuff, all right.
- Hi I'm Natalie
Ahern with news eight
and I'm here with
Colonel Parker.
Colonel can you provide us with
more information about
the walking dead?
- I only have facts
for you right now.
(gunshots)
- Okay.
- Fact number one, they are dead
and they're walking
around eating the living.
- Is that all?
- That's all the information
I have for you right now.
- So as you can
see Colonel Parker
and his men have the situation
under control, so we are
- Oh, one last thing
my men have just been
overrun by that
zombie herd over there
and I'm about to leave.
And I suggest you do the
same thing right now!
(growling)
(screams)
- Did you see that shit,
it just killed her.
(static)
- That's not good.
- [Frank} That
Wasn't good at all.
- All right so
now what do we do?
- My uncle has a boat,
plenty of food and water,
but we going to have to
fight our way to get there.
- Don't you watch
any zombie movies.
Look remember on
Dawn of The Dead,
where they got to the boat,
then made it to the island.
Zombies were there waiting
for them all ready.
- I hated that part.
- And besides I only got
like nine sells left.
I would've had 10 but I
just came from your house,
from like shooting
your son in the head.
So I'm down one shell.
- Yeah I kinda remember, it
happened like a few minutes ago.
- Sorry.
- So what do you suggest then?
Because we surely
can't stay here.
- Well the news ain't talking
about shit, so we need
firepower, heavy,
heavy firepower.
- Cooper! Yeah, I know for
a fact Cooper got some guns.
I think he collect them.
- Man, I don't really mess
with Cooper like that,
and his old ass
don't like me anyway.
- Well we sure as
hell can't stay here.
- All right, well
look we go over there
and he a zombie I get to
shoot him in the face.
(horn honking)
- Shh
You hear that?
- Yeah, car alarm,
look make sure this
noise ain't attracting them,
look out the window for me.
Hey Frank how's it
looking out there?
- It's a few of them, but
I think we'll be all right.
- Hey, Frank grab my bag man.
(growling)
Shit
(piano instrumental)
- You laughing, did you
finish you're homework?
- No.
- Well what's with
all this then?
Close them up go finish
your homework, be out.
And quit leaving
that damn door open.
Bust him in his damn head.
You know he looking more
and more like the mailman.
You laughing that ain't funny.
- You going to have
to make another one.
- Oh really?
- You looking a these?
You looking a these?
Frank, Frank, Frank!
- Frank!
What the!
Come on man we got to go,
we got to go, we got to go.
Go ,go, go, go.
- Ahh!
(gun cocks)
- What the hell you
shooting at man?
You went to that damn Stevie
Wonder school of shooting.
Come on, what you got?
(explosion)
- You need some help?
- Shut the hell up.
You ain't afraid
to kill yourself.
You couldn't told me
about that sooner?
- I think Cooper, Oh!
- Really?
- What?
- You had to shoot
the little zombie?
She wasn't but this big.
- That was a zombie?
- Uh, man we gonna have to
- I'm out of shells.
- See, you didn't have to
shoot the little zombie.
You could of took
her out yourself.
(growling)
- Maybe I didn't have to
shoot your son if in the face.
- You didn't!
- Hold this.
- Shooting kids and women,
man what's wrong with you.
- Hold on
- (growls)
- A ball?
We in the apocalypse
and you brought a ball?
- What you bring?
- Good point.
(growling)
- Come on.
- Finish him.
You know what, this is
something for this zombie.
(growling)
That's all you right there.
(growling)
Hope you got some more
tricks in that bag.
- Awe shit.
- Pull out your basketball now?
A lot of good that did us.
- How's it going Mike?
- What's up Coop?
- Nothing much, just
trying to figure
out how I'm going to kill you.
Yeah, I'm trying
to figure out which
head I'm going to blow off.
- Shit, Coop shoot
me in the face,
don't shoot my junk off man.
- You ain't got to do
this man, we not zombies.
- Ain't got to do this?
No reason,
are you serious?
This jackass slept with my wife.
- Mike, what he talking about?
- I kind of slept with
his wife a little bit.
- [Frank] Damn it Mike.
- You heard him, you slept
with my wife, prison style.
Twice.
- Okay , first of all, Coop.
Me and your wife made
sweet love, okay?
- Mike
- Second, it was
four times not two.
- Mike, shut the hell up, man.
- Fuck him he in the
zombie apocalypse,
he bringing up old shit.
- It happened three
fucking days ago!
- He right, it happened three,
I ain't got nothing else.
- Damn.
- I'm about to shoot
this son of a bitch.
- Hey relax Cooper, we don't
kill the living, right?
At least not yet.
- Stay out of this Tony.
- Come on man,
everybody know your
wife was a fucking hoe.
Come on man she tried
to fuck me on Christmas.
Wrapped her ass in gift
wrapping paper, man.
- On Jesus's birthday?
- On Christmas.
- Damn it!
- What's up guys?
- Hey
- What up Tony?
- What's up , hey Frank,
where your family at?
- They didn't make it.
- [Tony] Damn.
Well look man we need
to get in the house,
it ain't safe out here.
- To be honest, we didn't
really need your help.
I was slapping bitches and
kicking babies, we out here
Ahh!
(gun shot)
We need to get inside.
- [Frank] Yeah let's go.
- Dr. Chambers how
are you holding
out on your current position?
- My location is
stable, the immediate
threats to the facility
have been neutralized.
And the building is
completely locked down.
- Good we're sending
in an evac team in
25 minutes to recover you and
the antidote for the virus.
- Well sir, there
is just one problem.
- And what's that doctor?
An employee at the lab
has stolen the antidote,
and a copy of all my research.
- And how could you allow
something like this to happen?
- He probably panicked once the
virus spread in the building,
or he's planning on selling
the antidote on
the black market.
- Okay doctor I'm sending
in a team to get you.
- I've place a tracking
device on the antidote vials.
From the looks of it he has
been in one location for awhile.
Now I don't know if he's been
infected or not, just yet.
But, I'll send you
over the GPS codes,
and your man can
track the person down.
- I'm sending in a special
team to recover you,
the antidote, and
neutralize the threat.
Talk to you soon.
- Welcome to casa
del Cooper fellas,
beer and soda in the
refrigerator, food
in the cabinets.
Help yourselves.
- [Mike] Shit, that'll work
- We cannot stay down here
we got to come up with a
plan as soon as possible.
- We can't go back out there
we barely made it three blocks.
- We can't stay down here
like some punks, and wait
for somebody to come help
us, that's not going to work.
- All I know is that
- All you know is what?
- All right, I'm not
trying to scare you but,
dude over there in the
corner look like he
about to turn into a zombie.
- Come on, man not down here.
- [Mike] What should we do?
- You grab him,
I'll whoop his ass.
- Wait, why I got to grab him?
- Because you're a Leo, Leo's
like to take charge, let's go.
- I ain't no Leo!
(mellow music)
- Get his ass, Frank!
Get him, Get him!
Stay on him! Jab, jab, jab!
Go on Frank, get his ass!
Two piece and a biscuit,
two piece and a biscuit!
Come on Frank, let him
have it let him have it.
(yelling)
- [Tony] Somebody get
over there and help him.
Really?
- What, he's changed,
he's changed!
- He's not a zombie you
moron he's a retard.
- What's that smell then?
- That's simple,
Oscar made a boo boo.
- On me?
- [Cooper] Oh yeah.
- Damn.
- [ Cooper] Good job Oscar.
- Franklin this is Oscar, man.
He's mentally retarded.
- [Frank] We didn't know.
- What a hero.
- Come on Oscar.
- [Oscar] Excuse us.
- [Tony] Good job you
saved us from a re re.
- [Mike] Shit.
- [Frank] Dude you need
a bath or something.
(groaning)
- You think?
- Okay so does
anybody have a plan?
Anybody got any car
keys, gassed up vehicle?
Anything?
I mean, it's nice down here
in your little hideaway,
but eventually those things
are going to find a way in.
- And when they do, I'll
take my little Cooper scooper
and I'll shoot them
all right in the head.
- You ain't going to do shit.
- Yeah, say that a little
louder for me Mike.
- You heard me, you brought us
down to this damn death trap.
- [Woman] Everybody stop!
Look, come here come here.
- I'm Dan Devereux and
this is News TV eight.
This just in, breaking news
there have been widespread
attacks all over the city.
We have no specific answer
why this is going on,
but we do, I'm being told
I'm being told, we
do have video footage
from four am of what
we are led to believe
was the initial outbreak,
let's go to that
footage right now.
They're telling me in my
ear we do have that footage.
Let's go to that
footage right now.
(biting)
(growling)
(screaming)
absolutely disgusting,
very disturbing.
All roads in and out of the
city have been closed off.
The governor has
issued this statement.
All citizens are urged
to stay in their homes
until this situation
is under control.
I repeat the governor has
mandated that all citizens
stay in their homes until this
situation is under control.
We're now going to go
temporarily off air.
I'm being told, yes we're
going to go off air,
but we'll keep you updated
with information on possible
rescue areas
throughout the night.
Once again, we're urging
everyone, stay indoors,
lock your doors until this
situation is resolved.
We're going to go off the
air right now to gather
more information on rescue
areas, but when we come back
on please stay tuned , News
TV eight will have your rescue
area update information
available to see
if we can get out
of this madness.
I'm Dan Devereux News TV
eight, God bless us America.
We clear?
- [Camera Man] We're clear.
- Hey where the
bitch at with the
the fucking helicopter
that do traffic shit
because I got to get
the fuck out of here.
Fucking zombies running around
- [Camera Man] You
should stay here.
- Nigga I can go
wherever I want to,
shut your big dumb I didn't
make it in the NFL ass up.
That's why you back there
working the fucking camera.
I'm a fucking journalist
and America needs me to
give them the god damn news,
so I'm getting
the fuck up out of here!
(beep)
- That settles it, you
heard what the governor said
we are all going to stay
here until the Marines come
and take care of the situation.
- Coop I'm glad you took
us in and everything,
we appreciate it, but
I really don't think
we can stay here, I mean
we can't just sit here
and wait for somebody
to rescue us, really.
- Franklin for one
minute take your head
out of your ass and think.
We've got food, water,
ammo, and stable shelter
I guarantee you no one's
going to get in here.
- But for how long, Coop?
- Look man I just found
out our supplies got
cut in half, Sam is missing,
he probably took the shit.
- You got to be kidding me.
- [Tony] So what now man?
- Peanut
- Right
- My cousin Peanut.
- Peanut.
- Peanut?
- Peanut is what you call
a all purpose kind of guy.
- Shoot em up
- Anything you need,
illegal he can get it.
- All right, fuck
it man let's go.
- Only problem is
he's all the way
on the other side of town.
- Well that's freaking
beautiful Mike,
how do we even know your
cousin is still alive?
- Trust me, he alive, all he
do is sit at home, smoke weed,
and have unprotected
sex all day long.
- I wish I was Peanut.
- [Cooper] Who wouldn't.
- Look man, fuck it
I can get us there,
we just got to
find a good route.
- We just got to
stay away from the
populated areas and busy
intersections and shit.
Just give me a little time, and
we'll figure this thing out.
- Shh, y'all hear that?
(tires squealing)
- You got to be shitting me.
(crash)
- It isn't him
- [Frank] Well where'd he go?
- I don't give a damn
as long as he don't
attract too many of those things
(knocking)
(gunshot)
- Everybody out!
- Incoming
- [Mike] Damn!
(growling)
- Coop, where you at man?
- [Cooper] Everybody
out of the cellar!
(yelling)
(screaming)
Move! Move!
Come on! Move! Move!
(screaming)
Move they're right
behind me go! Go!
(helicopter flying overhead)
- All right listen
up, we got five hours,
combat formation keep
your hand on the trigger.
(growling)
(suspenseful music)
- All clear!
- That was easy.
- Too easy.
(growling)
- I running out of bullets son.
You got some?
Ow, what the fuck!
Come, on man what the
fuck just happened here?
- Sorry bro better you than me.
- Shit, what the fuck
Hey man!
I'm going to get your ass Mike!
(screaming)
(growling)
- [Maggie] Baby I don't
want to go in here.
- [Marcus] Don't
worry about it baby,
ain't nobody eating you but me.
- [Frank] Got a light.
That work?
(screams)
- Way to go numb nuts.
- Is everyone okay,
damn forgot one.
(Scream)
Oh shit, my bad
that was all my bad.
Aim was a little
off on that one.
(laughs)
- Probably didn't have
nothing to do with
the sunglasses you
got on in the dark.
- I don't like
your tone, junior.
- Who the hell you
calling junior?
- I just saved your god
damn ass so what the
- Hey, Hey, where
the fuck is Leonard.
- Fuck y'all looking at me for?
- Because he was
standing behind you!
- [Frank] He was your watch.
- You know what, you right.
Damn sure right.
What was the question?
- Where the hell is Leonard.
- Tall dude, wife beater, shot
gun, yeah he didn't make it.
- What?
- Yeah they probably chewing
on his ass right now.
Horrible, worst thing I
done seen all day, no, no
earlier when I blew his son's
face off that was pretty bad.
- With this shit again.
- But, fucked my morning up.
- What's the situation colonel?
- Plan is someone fucked up!
- What?
- What I understand is it
was a failed experiment
blah, blah, blah and
the dead are coming
back eating the living.
- A failed experiment?
My family's dead because
of that experiment.
- [Mike] Kick his ass Frank.
Beat his ass.
- [Tony] Chop him up man!
- Kick his ass
- Testicles and all, beat
his Denzel wanna be ass.
- Beat his ass.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, it's not my fault
my superiors sent me
here on clean up detail.
Me and my men
fought bravely but,
we were overrun.
- This is bullshit.
- We saw the broadcast.
You ran off like a bitch
and your guys got ate up.
- Yeah what kind of pussy ass,
punk ass, soldier are you?
- The kind that's still alive.
Anyway it appears that the
ones bitten on the neck
move a lot faster than the ones
bitten on their extremities.
- Colonel Parker why haven't
they come back to get you yet?
- The extraction team is
supposed to be here in an hour.
Hey, what is he doing?
- Hey, hey, calm down
man, he's not a zombie.
He's a retard.
- Keep that goddamn
'tard away from me.
The extraction team is either
dead or they're not coming.
Either way we want
to move as far north
of the city as possible.
- What the hell is up north?
- Trust me, you want
to be as far north
from the city in about
five hours, as possible.
- That's code for
they're about to
blow the city up in five hours.
- How the hell would
you know that, Mike?
- It's typical zombie
movie protocol.
- [Frank] protocol
Zombies get out of control
they blow the city up
and they write some
bullshit cover story.
- [Frank] Act like
nothing ever happened.
- [Cooper] Really?
- What about guns?
- Who said that?
- Me sir, you're the only one
with a loaded weapon,
what about the rest of us?
- You make a good point,
what's your name son?
- Victor, sir.
- Are you kidding
me, that's about
the dumbest name I ever heard.
I don't like it and don't you
ever use it again around me.
- Calm down let's just go over
to my cousin Peanut's crib.
- [Col. Parker] What?
- My cousin Peanut he
stay near Stevensons park.
- Actually that's along the
way, and you say this cousin
has a lot of weapons, right?
- He got all the
guns that we need.
- [Cooper] What the
hell are we waiting for?
- Let's go.
- Stay in formation.
Beta go get the truck,
Gamma cover now.
(growling)
- [Mike] Okay his store is
right around the corner,
let me just make sure
everything clear.
I think I fucked up.
- What's the problem?
- [Mike] I'm pretty sure
I fucked up, I'm sorry.
- You're an idiot, I knew
we shouldn't of come here.
This place is completely
surrounded by them things!
- Oh shit,
oh shit,
oh shit.
(water trickling)
- Baby, what's wrong?
- Oh baby I think
my water just broke.
- Come on mike, come
on man my wife can't
be out here when
this baby come man.
- [Mike] All right
I got an idea.
- Come on then, come with it.
- [Frank] You got a ball again.
- A baseball, you going to
play fetch with zombies.
(car alarm blaring)
- [Mike] That's a good one.
- [Col. Parker] Let's
get out of here, come on.
(car alarm)
- What the hell are you doing?
- What she's having cravings.
- put that shit down we got
zombies out there coming
- Hello
- Cravings?
- Hey!
- Now what do we do?
- I'm tired of running.
- [Tony] Me too.
- I'm not.
- Let's do this.
(upbeat music)
- Peanut!
Peanut!
Come on.
- What's up cuzzo?
- What up Peanut man
I'm glad to see you.
- What up Peanut.
- What up Franklin.
Hey y'all thirsty or something?
Y'all want some
banana smoothies?
- Hey Peanut do you know what
the fuck is going on outside?
- Yeah man them crackheads been
banging on my door all day.
After I sold all my
guns I locked up.
- Peanut those are not
crackheads man they zombies.
- Oh.
So you want them
banana smoothies?
- Fuck it let's just go.
- Hey, hey wait a minute.
We were just in a serious melee
with those things outside.
I'm not about to go out there
and one of you assholes
turns into a zombie.
- You know what, he right
usually in the movies
somebody end up getting bit,
and they afraid to tell
everybody in the group
because they might
get shot in the head.
- Yes so everyone check
yourselves, right now.
(suspenseful music)
From what I've heard
it doesn't take long
for the infection
to take over the brain.
So, if you've been bit,
please tell us right now.
No sense in risking the
lives of every one else.
- Are you all right young lady?
- Yes, I'm fine, just
a little constipated.
(gunshot)
- Damn!
- God dammit Oscar!
- Okay, who gave
the 'tard a gun?
Not a smart decision.
- I think I might have.
I'll clean this
up, y'all go ahead,
go inside and make
yourself at home.
- What about our smoothies?
- Dr. Chambers my evac team
touched down about an hour ago
but the GPS signal was lost.
They have pinpointed the
location of the antidote,
but no way of
identifying who has it.
Send me all of the footage
from the security cameras.
- I'm still waiting
for the system
to completely reboot
before I can pull up
the video footage.
- How much longer?
- One hour.
- Don't worry doctor
we will be there
to get you as soon as the
antidote is recovered.
- Please hurry.
- Is everything okay?
- I'll be okay, just
tell the team to hurry!
- We're on our way doctor.
(techno music)
- Peanut, I don't
understand how the hell
you been locked in
here and you don't know
what's going on outside.
- Man me and my girl, we
just been chilling all day.
- Your girl?
- Yeah she in the room sleep.
- All right Peanut we need
guns man, what do you got?
- I ain't got nothing
cuz, all I got is
those three guns on
the table right there.
They cleaned me
out this morning.
But, if you come back
tomorrow, I'll have some more.
- Come back tomorrow?
- You didn't think
it was strange
that all of these people
wanted guns all of a sudden?
- Yeah, it's a whole bunch
of crackheads outside,
I saw that.
- No they not crackheads you
fucking idiot, they're zombies!
- Ooh,
you sure?
- I'm gonna kill him.
- Calm down, calm
down we still got
three hours to get
to the safe zone.
Let's just grab the guns
and get out of here.
Is there a back way
out of this place?
- [Maggie] Quit standing around.
Get this baby out
of me right now!
- [Marcus] My wife is
going to have this baby,
it's going to happen right here,
it's going to happen right now!
- All right, All
right, all right-.
Peanut, Peanut grab some
hot towels and some water.
Franklin get a pillow,
put under her head.
- I'm on it.
- Come on people let's go!
- [Tony] Okay, all
right give me a push.
- I am pushing!
All right I see,
wait I see the head.
One more push!
Keep pushing, keep pushing!
(grunting)
- Fuck,
I hate you.
(baby crying)
(camera clicking)
- It's a boy!
- [Marcus] He look just like us.
- Baby he looks just like you.
- [Marcus] Yeah, his facial
expressions is just like mine.
- Hey man this baby stink.
- Good job, you pushed
that baby out, didn't you?
- I'm hungry.
- You are?
- Can I get a twinkie?
- Shh
- Yall heard that?
- Yeah sound like
some scratching.
- Man, that's my girlfriend.
she been sick ever since she
came back from the store.
- You said your girls been sick?
- Yeah one of those crackheads
bit her when she went out.
(screaming)
(gunshot)
(growling)
(explosion)
(engine starting)
- [Captain] Good job everyone,
good job for securing the area
lets get the hell
up out of here.
- [Beta] Thanks
captain let's go!
(growling)
(screams)
- I expect everyone to
do the same if it was me.
- Why didn't you save me?
You should have saved me!
- I tried to save you!
(crying)
- She's not going to make it.
- No
- Don't leave me like this baby.
- Baby promise me
one thing sweetie.
- What baby, anything,
anything whatever you want.
- Promise you'll
take care of my baby.
- Baby, don't say
that, don't say that
Why else, of course I'm
gonna take care of our baby
why would you ask me that?
- It's
It's not
our
baby.
- What?
Bitch what!
Bitch hold on
Baby! Uh uh, no, no, no, no, no.
Not right now, wake your ass up.
Wake up!
(sneezes)
You ain't gonna die now.
Wake up.
Baby, what did you just say?
- Hey Marcus, Marcus.
What did you just say?
What what's going on?
- You got a Indian
in your family?
- We got a little, little
Cherokee or something like that
what you mean Indian?
- No, No I mean like,
turban, 7-11, red dot Indian.
- [Marcus] Turban,
7-11? Wake you ass up!
- Hey man check this out!
- [Marcus] Wake up!
Wake up I swear.
Wake up, wake up, boy
I'm going to Ray Rice,
OJ, it's going to look like a
NFL superstar party in here.
- Baby look like Rasheed.
- [Marcus] Wake up!
What you mean it's not
ours, What you mean?
Not who's? Who's ours?
Me and you? Who is we?
Is it, we us?
What's going on wake up.
You would die now.
- Is this going on now?
- Yep.
These my security cameras.
- [Tony] They kicking ass.
- Wait, you mean
these things were on
the whole time we were out
there fighting those things?
- Yeah, yeah.
Y'all was getting it in.
- [Mike] You know
what, you can shoot him
anytime that you want, I
don't care at this point.
- That must be the evac unit.
Coop, Cooper, come with me.
Come on!
- Bye Cooper.
- [ Col. Parker] Come on Coop!
- [Cooper] I had him.
- He got a big mustache.
- So uh, who's going to do it?
- Do what?
- Finish her off.
- Dude what the fuck
are you talking about?
- Zombie 101, you
get bit by a zombie
you come back as a zombie.
Somebody got to
finish this bitch off.
- No man, I'm not shooting this
man's dead wife in the head.
- He right.
Same thing happened to my
family, my wife and son.
- Yeah, that's right, I had
to shoot his son in the face
this morning, so I shouldn't
have to shoot somebody else.
I'm sorry, you still
pissed about that?
- A little bit.
- Look shouldn't we
at least tell Marcus
that we got to shoot his wife?
- Ain't this some shit how
I'm supposed to take of the
(screaming)
Oh you woke now huh?
Oh, oh you woke?
You running around sleeping
with Osama Bin Laden,
then you gonna turn me?
(heavy breathing)
(piano instrumental)
(camera clicking)
- Dr. Chambers, Dr.
Chambers are you there?
- Yeah, Yeah, I'm here.
- What in the hell is
happening with you?
The evac team lost the
tacking device and they need
the image of the person
from your lab who has it.
- Sir, I think I've managed to
reproduce the
antidote on my own.
I injected myself
with the A25 virus.
- Are you serious?
- Yeah, I'm serious.
- And what happened?
- It appears I have
neutralized the virus, sir.
I feel that
- And what was that doctor?
- I was just saying that I feel
- And you're going
to act like I didn't
see you just spit two teeth
out of your fucking mouth?
Keep running tests and get
me a suitable antidote.
- I don't understand sir,
what's the use of the
antidote if the virus
is still contained
within the city, right?
- For now, but after
your idiot employee
unleashed the A25,
I've been getting
eight figure offers all morning.
I'm about to be rich bitch!
- Sir, this virus was
not designed for that.
- It really doesn't
matter at this point
because my team is still looking
for the original antidote.
Now get me that damn
security footage.
- And what if I don't
bring the antidote?
- I'm going to leave
you and your team
here to get blown to hell.
- I'm the only one left,
everyone else is dead.
- Are you sure about that?
(growling)
- Everyone,
this is Captain
Williams and his elite
fighting team of
S-I-E-G-E, siege.
- All right listen up everyone,
my name is Captain Williams.
First things first,
anyone's been injured,
or more importantly, bitten.
- Oh, uh everyone's
looking for you back there.
- Everyone's looking
for me back there?
Fuck out of here.
- Yeah are you sure?
I'm at the same coordinates
that I gave you.
Okay, copy that.
- What's the ETA on
that chopper captain?
- Yeah, about that chopper.
It's coming,
not yet!
Put your gun down.
- Whats going on?
- Don't make me repeat myself.
- All right.
- Here's the situation,
we're not a rescue unit.
Secondly, we don't give
a fly twisted turtle fuck
about anybody in this room.
And that includes the you
are not the father baby.
- Then why are
you here, captain?
- My employer R2
pharmaceuticals sent
us on a recovery mission.
- What exactly are you
looking for, captain?
- It's classified.
- Classified, you
know that means its
probably got
something to do with
this zombie
apocalypse, bullshit.
- We don't need to explain
shit to you people,
so toss your weapons
and empty your pockets.
- [Female] Hey what
the fuck are doing?
Give me that bag.
- What's your problem?
- [Female] Looks like I
found who our thief is.
- Captain] Oh your an employee
of R2 pharmaceuticals huh?
- I don't know what
you talking about.
- [Captain] What
else is in that bag?
- What does that have
to do with anything?
- Nothing else here sir.
- [Captain] Where'd you put it?
- Put what?
- [Captain] I won't
ask again, you going to
find yourself, by
yourself outside.
- [Mike] Man I don't know
what you're talking about.
- Tell him something, Mike.
- Where's the guy
with the glasses?
- That's where I know him from.
- [Peanut] What y'all
want on y'all pizza ?
- [Col. Parker] What pizza?
- That nerdy dude
said he was going to
get pizza so I gave
him the keys to my car.
- Son of a bitch!
- So y'all don't want pizza?
- [Cooper] No you idiot!
- I guess I'll go lock
the door back then.
- What!
- [Cooper] What, You left
the door open! Incoming!
(growling)
- How's it going soldier?
- Not good, I've
seen better days
my whole arm is on fire.
- Yeah, well hang in
there, we're going
to get some help right away.
- No, I know what time it is,
I need you to do me a favor.
- What's that?
- I need you to
(gunshot)
- What y'all finna
to wait until this
mother fucker turn and
start biting people!
- Now hold on a second,
we need to get a grip
on this situation.
Now you need to tell us
everything that's going on,
or you three can get
the fuck off the bus!
- Really, is that where
you want to take this,
a lot of people are
going to get hurt.
- You need to
stand down colonel.
- No you need to stand down.
- Control your men.
- You don't scare me,
I fucked men bigger
than you and they liked it.
- Fucked guys?
- Everybody just
need to calm down,
but did Coop say he
used to fuck guys?
- Fuck, what the fuck?
- Okay, all right, our
employer R2 pharmaceuticals,
came up with the
ultimate vaccine.
They took the world's
deadliest viruses,
Anthrax, Ebola, West
Nile and came up
with a serum called A25.
Only side effect is, you
become a flesh eating zombie.
- Side effect?
Constant vomiting,
explosive diarrhea,
those are side effects.
Not eating somebody's face.
- Hey Mike how about you explain
how you work for these people,
but let none of us
know that you work
for the company that
created this crap.
- Because I knew y'all was
going to get pissed at me.
- And why would we get
pissed at you, Michael?
- Because I'm kind of the
reason this thing started.
- [Cooper] What the fuck?
- [Col. Parker] What?
- [Tony] Wow, dude.
- All right look it
all happened like this.
Damn, her ass is soft as hell.
(coughing)
Shit.
- What are you doing in here?
This is a restricted area!
- This not the break room?
- No it's not you idiot!
There's no smoking
allowed in here.
- You sure?
- Who is your supervisor?
- Oh, what's his name?
You want to hit that don't you?
- No.
- [Mike] Yes you do, why
don't you go ahead and hit it?
- No I don't.
- [Mike] You hit weed before.
A little bit.
You might as well.
- I don't feel nothing.
(screaming)
(speaking in a foreign language)
- This some good shit, I got
it from my cousin Peanut.
- How much does he
sell his bags for?
- I don't know he give
it to me for free.
- Can you get me one?
- All right, you want
to hear something funny?
- Yeah.
- I kind of killed my
wife a few days ago.
- Yeah okay.
(laughing)
You're serious aren't you.
- Yeah.
- Why would you do that?
- I don't know?
(laughing)
- Poor girl.
- Look at this.
- Nobody wants to see that.
- It's a scratch and sniff.
- No that's
- Smell it.
- No it smells pretty
bad, smells like
you smelled it a couple times.
Did you spit in this?
- [Mike] Uh mm.
(scary music)
(groans)
- You all right?
You pregnant?
Stop drop and roll, I
ain't got not condoms
so we still going to do it?
You all right?
Let me just
check your pulse.
- [Scientist] What the
hell are you doing?
Get off of her!
(screaming)
(screams)
(camera clicking)
- You know what I'm glad
I got this off my chest.
I've been riding around
with y'all this whole,
goddamn!
- My fucking family is
dead because of you.
- [Mike] I can't feel
my whole right side!
- [Frank] This whole time!
- You two need to
shut the hell up.
It was nothing
that could be done.
- Captain, why
were you sent here?
- Well we're here to
recover the antidote,
which your friend
managed to run off with.
And I suppose you
wouldn't happen
to know where he went do you?
- Now how the hell
would I know that?
- I know where he at.
- How's that?
- I got a GPS on my Hummer,
Oh and before he left I heard
him talking about railyard.
I ain't never hear of no
pizza joint called railyard.
- Ain't that a bitch.
Your nerdy friend must
have ties with R2.
It's just a few
clicks away from here.
- Wow, you actually did
something productive.
Way to go Peanut.
- [Cooper] Way to go Peanut!
- [Tony] Yeah good job Peanut.
- [Frank] All right Peanut.
- I got a question weren't you
driving this bus at some point?
- Yep.
- Why you not driving right now.
- Dude with the helmet wanted
to drive so I was like,
go ahead, so I let him.
- Oscar?
- That's his name.
- Awe shit!
(screams)
(gunshot)
(applause)
- Welcome to the party Jade,
it's always nice to see you.
- You know I like
to make an entrance.
Where's everyone else captain?
- This is all that's left.
- Sorry, to hear that,
my group was overrun too.
Any luck on the antidote?
- Actually we had it
and then we lost it.
Their friends ran off with it.
- It's probably headed to
about three miles from here.
- How did you know that?
- The CEO of R2
pharmaceuticals, Joseph Roberts,
he made the same
deal with my team.
We were sent in
as a back up plan,
we didn't realize how
fast this thing had spread
the entire city was
consumed within hours.
- What about containment?
- Containment was
never an objective.
Our orders were to
secure the antidote.
Colonel, I hate to be
the bearer of bad news,
but you and your
men were sent here
to make it look like the
situation was under control.
- Makes sense.
- What are you talking about?
- There's no money in the virus.
All the money's in the cure,
pharmaceutical can make
billions off of it.
- Exactly, at this point
the mission is survival,
speaking of which you
need to ditch that baby.
- No, I'm not going
to ditch this baby.
I promised this baby's
parents that I was gonna take
care of it and I'm
gonna fucking do it.
- Hey, it's your funeral.
- What's the plan?
We're just gonna go in
there and kill everybody?
- Listen this is our only option
before the nuke this place.
Our employer, Joseph
Roberts, he's got the
military in his back
pocket, we intercepted a
transmission and found
out that he plans
to nuke the entire city
once the antidote is secure.
That's great our
tax dollars paid for
the freaking zombie apocalypse.
- [Frank] I can't
do this anymore,
can't y'all see
this shit is over?
- You know, some people
say that life is short,
I disagree, life is long
it can be extremely long
depending on how you live yours.
I know you've seen how
bad things can get,
and how quick they
can get that way,
well I'm not about
to lie to you.
Things are about to get a
whole lot worse, so what,
you're tired, you don't
want to fight anymore?
You just want to
lay on the ground
like a human shish
kabob or something.
Is that what you
really want to do?
Let me tell you something
you already know.
The world ain't all
sunshine and rainbows,
it is a very mean
and nasty place.
And I don't care
how tough you are,
it will beat you to your knees
and it will keep you there
permanently, if you let it.
- Dude this bitch
quoting Rocky right now.
- And nobody's gonna
hit as hard as life.
And it ain't about
how hard you hit
- In Rocky, he gave the
same speech to his son.
- Can get hit and keep
moving forward, how much
can you take and
keep moving forward.
That's how winning is done!
Now the person responsible
for this is not far from here.
I promise you this, you
get me there, I will
personally put a
bullet in his head
and get you the all
out of this hell hole.
Now are you with me?
I said are you with me!
I said are you with me.
I said are you with me!
(screams)
- Oh shit! Go!
- [Mike] Oh shit! Go!
- [Jade] You need
to ditch that baby.
- Ow! Shit! Hey, mother fucker!
You ain't shit!
Oh shit, Oh shit!
(groaning)
- Load three more and let's
get the hell out of here.
Let me ask you something?
What exactly was your plan,
I mean steal the antidote,
what you wanted me
to buy it from you?
- Yes sir.
- Then, you get the hell out
of dodge when you realize
how fast the virus had spread.
Like I told you on
the phone, you get me
the antidote and I
get you out of here.
- Thank you sir, Thank
you, I'm so sorry
for all of this, thank you.
- Do me a favor handcuff
this sneaky son of a bitch.
- Wait, wait, What?
- Get him ready
for human testing.
- Wait, what, what,
wait, wait, wait.
- I told you that I was
going to provide a way to get
you out of here, and that's
exactly what I'm doing.
You're my new test subject now.
We're about to put
all kinds of drugs,
probes and anal
shit in your body.
Really, just gonna
fuck you up so bad.
(laughing)
- You son of a bitch!
- Take him the fuck out of here.
- Mr. Roberts, were
you about to leave me?
- Of course not,
actually you're right on time.
Do you mind shooting him please.
- Say uh, don't you
need the antidote?
- Nope I managed to get the
original all by myself, thanks.
- My antidote is
new and improved.
Yep, mine is much better.
- Doctor, what have
you done to yourself?
- Just a few
upgrades Mr. Roberts.
You see what I have created
will be a new beginning.
- A new beginning for what?
- Humanity.
- That's incredible
doctor, why don't you come
with us to we can examine
you, and run some tests.
- Certainly, but there's,
there's just one thing.
- What's that?
- Can the rest of
my team join us?
- Of course.
There's plenty of room.
Thought you said
your team was dead.
- Well you can say
they're deadish.
(screaming)
- [Mike] What you looking
at your hands for?
- I tossed a baby!
I tossed a fucking baby, oh God.
- Yeah that was sick, and I
killed my wife two days ago,
that was some sick shit.
- That's some sick shit man,
I mean the baby
ain't even ate yet.
- Fuck me, grandma.
- What the hell happened here.
- Damn, look like the
zombies beat us here.
- I don't think
zombies did this.
- What makes you say that?
- They'd probably
be zombies by now.
They just look beat the hell up.
- What ever the hell happened
here, isn't important.
What we need to do is hurry up
and get around these tracks.
- [Cooper] Look
over there captain.
(groaning)
(growling)
- I got this.
(screams)
(yelling)
- All right huddle up,
listen we got about
ten minutes before we get
clear of that blast radius.
And we can either
fight that thing
and get to the other side,
or stay here and wait
to die, your call.
- I don't think we can take
that thing on, one at a time.
So I suggest we surround him.
Mike you come in
first, hard and fast
I want you to knock him out.
- Okay that's probably
not going to happen,
so let's go to the next plan.
- Coop, I want you to
come in hard and fast.
- What?
- We got your back Coop,
we're gonna be there.
- How come every time
someone stands next
to this son of a bitch
they end up dead?
- [Frank] You got a point.
Peanut what the hell you doing?
- I had to get some more rocks.
- What?
- There was three
crack heads they wanted
to play the game too.
- Where?
- [Frank] Awe shit.
New plan.
- I think I got to
get another rock.
- Why?
- There's a crack
head behind Mike.
- What!
- Shit.
- Look here zombie
bitch I ain't got time.
(screaming)
(growling)
- You got something
on your shirt.
Man, give me some chips or
something, some cookies.
- What was that?
- A grenade.
- Wait, wait, wait don't
tell me you've been
running around here with
grenades the whole time.
- Okay.
- Okay, what?
- I'm not going to
tell you I've been
running around with
grenades this whole time.
- Give me the grenades Peanut.
- Man,
can't do nothing.
- Come on we need to go now!
We need to go, now, now, now!
It's too late brace yourselves!
Down!
(explosion)
