 
Wasted Time

By Mya O'Malley

Blue Tulip Publishing

www.bluetulippublishing.com

Smashwords Edition

Copyright © 2015 MYA O'MALLEY

This is a work of fiction. Names, places, characters, and events are fictitious in every regard. Any similarities to actual events and persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental. Any trademarks, service marks, product names, or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners, and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if any of these terms are used. Except for review purposes, the reproduction of this book in whole or part, electronically or mechanically, constitutes a copyright violation.

WASTED TIME

Copyright © 2015 MYA O'MALLEY

ISBN: 978-1-942246-65-7

Cover Art by Jena Brignola
TABLE OF CONTENTS

PROLOGUE

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

CHAPTER ELEVEN

CHAPTER TWELVE

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

CHAPTER NINTEEN

CHAPTER TWENTY

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

CHAPTER THIRTY

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

EPILOGUE

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

ALSO FROM BLUE TULIP PUBLISHING
For Alexandra, Alan, Mom and Dad. Thank you for all of your love and support.

#  PROLOGUE

Her face was the only thing that had kept him sane during his deployment. At this moment, however, thoughts of Morgan had been pushed to the side for reasons of pure survival. Declan wiped the mud from his eye with a swift movement of his hand, just quick enough so that he could see again. Booming thunder went off near and far.

Swearing under his breath, Declan closed one eye and squinted the other shut as he spied his target. _Breathe._ One, two, three... he could do this. The first time he'd had to shoot another man he had faltered, hesitated only the briefest of seconds, during which time the man escaped his line of sight and shot a fellow soldier in the leg, causing serious injury.

This time, Declan concentrated, aimed his M4 rifle, and fired. The distinct _thud_ of a man dropping to the ground confirmed the target had been hit. Swiping at the sweat in his eyes from the sweltering mid-day heat, Declan gulped and struggled to his knees. Lining up his rifle again, his neck and shoulders ached with fatigue. He bit down and gritted his teeth, tasting dirt while fighting off the pain.

It seemed as if hours had gone by, when in fact, it had probably only been minutes when finally the haunting sound of gunfire ceased. Not one to trust silence in any setting, Declan mentally counted upward until he reached near fifty.

"All clear," his buddy, Sean, called out. "All clear."

Declan, always cautious, still maintained his position until he heard his fellow soldiers from his platoon begin to speak. Peeking up from his ravine, Declan rose slowly to his feet as the rifle was pressed to his side.

Surveying the damage, it appeared that several of their enemies were lying still on the ground. The man he had shot lay still, appearing lifeless. Another man lay several feet away. It seemed the enemies had taken off, deserting the boundaries of the mountainous terrain of Afghanistan. His platoon mates fell silent, all business as they quickly gathered their belongings to head back to base.

Declan clutched his rifle, drawing closer to his victim. Curiosity had gotten the best of him. Fully aware of his previous actions, Declan stepped even closer. He had never killed a man before — injured, yes, but never killed. This man did not appear to be alive.

His heart sped up as sweat caused his fatigues to cling to his body. For God's sake, the man looked to have been only in his early twenties at best. _What have I done? What are we doing here?_ Waves of nausea rose and Declan swallowed hard.

"Hey! Step back!" Sean called out. "Move out! I repeat, move out!"

Hearing his friend call out to him, Declan turned toward the sound of his voice, realizing his mistake seconds too late. He should have known better; he should have. But no amount of training can prepare you for taking another man's life.

Glancing swiftly at Sean through tear-stained eyes, he saw the movement in his peripheral vision. Sean raced to the open dirt road. They were sitting ducks, in plain sight. The man that Declan had presumed dead, the one he had shot, raised his own rifle and fired at Sean, who dropped instantly to ground.

"No! No!" Declan spun his head back to the imminent threat, a moment too late. The force of the explosion knocked him to the ground in an instant. Morgan's face was the last thing that registered in his mind as another shot fired, leaving his world black.

# CHAPTER ONE

Two Years Earlier

Morgan hustled down the hallway — traffic had been awful that morning since a construction crew had created a nearly thirty-minute delay. One thing Morgan abhorred was being late, for anything, but especially for work. It wasn't like she worked in an office where she could slide in and nobody would notice. Being a teacher meant being there on time, or her students would be left standing in the hallway with their bus aide. No, she couldn't have that. Clutching her books to her chest, she scurried toward her classroom.

"Oh! Excuse me!"

A body slammed into her, causing her books and papers to scatter across the floor. Irritation coursed through her until she glanced up to see the person who had knocked into her. A pair of piercing dark blue eyes met hers and she stood, as if transfixed. Neither spoke for a brief moment until the man cleared his throat, breaking the silence.

"I... I'm sorry. I didn't see you." The deep voice caused her to stare at this man once more.

Irritation was long gone as she took in his shaggy black hair and fair skin. Dressed in camouflage attire, she couldn't control her racing heart as she gazed up at this man.

"Here, let me help you." The man bent down to gather Morgan's books and papers.

"Oh! Thank you." Scooting down to help gather her things, she was embarrassed to notice that she had just left her materials lying there on the floor. Suddenly it hit her that the morning bell was about to ring.

"Listen, thanks for your help. I have to run!" She grabbed the books from him and sprinted down the hallway with a smile escaping her lips.

What was that man even doing here? Recalling that there was an assembly today for the older students about community jobs, she figured he must be here to present for the children. As the bell rang its final call for line up, Morgan was settled in her classroom and just about ready for class.

"Good morning." Her classroom aide, Elle, walked through the door moments later. Apparently Elle had hit the same traffic.

"Hey, good morning. Do you mind bringing the kids in? I just have to check on something."

Elle nodded as she placed her bag and jacket down in the closet.

Her aide was new to this; it was her first experience working in a school, but so far this year she was proving to be reliable and great with the kids. The class was an inclusion Pre-K class, some of the children had Individualized Education Plans (IEPs) stating their goals and objectives; others did not. Morgan made a mental note to ask Elle if she had ever considered going back to school to be a teacher; she thought Elle would be wonderful at the job.

After perusing her calendar for the day, Morgan sighed as she realized she had forgotten to get more celery and cream cheese for her snack project later that afternoon when her second group of students arrived. No matter, she would just run out at lunchtime and pick up the items.

The morning flew by, her mind occupied by snack time, art projects, and recess for her kids. The man in the hallway came to mind several times and she caught herself grinning.

"Somebody's having a good day," Elle noted as the women sat on the painted green bench near the swings with the wind whipping across the playground. Swiping a strand of hair from her eyes, Morgan was coming to realize that her aide was very observant.

"Hectic, but good, yes." Morgan nodded while scanning the playground. Sara was swinging a bit too high for her liking. Rising to her feet, Morgan walked over to Sara, asking her to slow down. Everyone else seemed to be playing nicely, so Morgan headed back to the bench and settled in next to Elle once more.

"How's everything with Billy?"

Billy was Elle's boyfriend of several years. He had come by to pick Elle up a few times and Morgan liked him immediately. He seemed considerate and attentive to Elle.

"He's great. We're great. How about you? When are you going to make time in your life for a guy?"

They had discussed this before. Morgan would rather be alone than jump through all the hoops of dating. Thinking back to Sam, her old high school boyfriend of three years, she bit her lip. She and Sam had been good together, but it seemed that he couldn't wait for Morgan to return home from college. Perhaps he wasn't to blame, four years was a long time to wait. Seeing each other on random weekends and breaks hadn't been enough. They had parted ways amicably enough, but no longer stayed in touch. When and if the time came for another boyfriend, Morgan would be open to the idea, but no, she wasn't about to go out searching for a guy.

"If it's meant to be, it's meant to be." Side by side, the two women chuckled as Elle joined in and finished the sentence for Morgan.

"We should grab a cup of coffee one day after work. How does that sound?"

Morgan could use a friend. Most of her friends had moved away after college, starting graduate school, getting engaged.

"Sure. Sounds great," Elle agreed. "Hey, what's Tommy doing over there?"

Shielding her eyes from the blinding sun, Morgan rose to her feet as she saw Tommy heading towards the edge of the property.

"Sit. I got this one." Elle was off, calling for Tommy.

Once more, the man from this morning flitted into her thoughts. She could ask around, see who he was, but no, that wasn't her style. Curiosity continued to plague her, though.

When it was finally time to dismiss her morning class, Morgan headed towards her car for her run to the store. Since she only needed those few items to make her "ants on a log," Morgan would have enough time to prepare for her afternoon group and eat her peanut butter and jelly sandwich she had packed that morning.

"Hey."

It was _that_ voice again. Glancing up, she took in the man from that morning in the hallway. There went her heart again. He was even more handsome than she had recalled.

"Oh, hi." Red heat slowly traveled to her cheeks.

"I'm sorry. I never got the chance to introduce myself. You took off so fast this morning. I'm Declan. Declan Blake." He extended his large hand as Morgan reached over to shake it.

"I'm Morgan. Morgan Matthews. Pre-K Inclusion teacher here at Willow Brook School."

The man's eyes bored into hers. "Are you a Special Education teacher?"

"Yes, I am." Why did she find it difficult to find her voice?

"Wow, that's a noble profession. My cousin was classified learning disabled. I think it's a wonderful thing that you do."

"Thanks. How about you? I see that you're in the service."

"The Army. I joined a while back. I've always wanted to join, but I got sidetracked for a while. I headed toward construction after school, the union benefits were great and all, but I didn't feel fulfilled, you know?"

"So you signed on." Morgan felt comfortable with this man; conversation flowed easily.

"Yes, I went to basic training, continued on to the Army National Guard, and now I'm back in construction and in the reserves."

It didn't go unnoticed that he didn't take his eyes off her.

"Now _that's_ a noble profession." Morgan grinned at him, unable to look away. For a moment, they stood, gazing into each other's eyes.

Morgan broke the stare and glanced around the parking lot. "Well, Declan Blake, it was nice to meet you." With a smile, she extended her hand. Declan took it and held on a bit longer than necessary.

"Morgan Matthews, it's been a pleasure." His smile reached his eyes as he continued to grasp her hand. "Hey, do you have time to grab a cup of coffee?"

Grabbing a cup of coffee with this man seemed like her idea of heaven, but she knew that she didn't have the time right now.

"I'm sorry. I have to run to the store and be back here for my second class of the day." He must have noticed the regret in her eyes, because he persisted, trying once more.

"Okay, how about grabbing that cup of coffee after school, say around four o'clock?"

There was nowhere she'd rather be. "Sure, sounds great. Want to meet at the diner up the road?"

"Milly's it is. Four o'clock." With a sexy salute, he was off to his pick-up truck.

Morgan had no idea that she was holding her breath until she released a huge sigh. Something told her that this guy was special. Placing her hand on the car door, she watched him walk away before getting in. She sat for a moment, unable to get that grin off her face, before heading to the store.

_What was that all about?_ It had been quite a while since a woman had evoked that kind of reaction from him. From the moment he had smacked into her in the hallway, he hadn't been able to get her out of his head. During the assembly, he had continually scanned the audience, looking for her, but he never spotted her. Nor did he run into her again in the hallway. At one point he had even walked the hallways, feigning that he was lost, until a custodian directed him to the lobby doors.

Once he was in the parking lot, Declan took his time meandering over to his pick-up truck. He would wait five minutes; that was all.

His appearance at the assembly had been a hit, as some of the teachers invited him back to their rooms for a question and answer session. By the time he was finished, it was just about lunchtime. _Teachers had to eat, right?_ And sometimes they went out to eat. Just four minutes more.

With only two minutes left, he spotted her walking toward him with long legs, and dark, wavy hair whipping in the wind. _Come on, man, you can do it. Just talk to her._

Was it his imagination or had she appeared interested too? He could have been standing there making a complete fool of himself; a woman like that was bound to have a boyfriend, a husband even. But she had said yes to his invitation for coffee and now here he was, sitting across from this unbelievably stunning creature.

"Did you always know that you wanted to teach?"

"Pretty much. I mean, my mom used to hear me every day after school playing teacher with my dolls and stuffed animals." She blushed sweetly.

Somehow he could picture that; he could almost see her as a little girl, standing there, speaking to her toys. A light chuckle escaped as he met her gaze.

"What's so funny?" Her own laughter sounded in the room.

He liked the way her eyes crinkled when she laughed; hell, he liked everything about this woman, from her beautiful looks to her shy, sweet smile.

Hours flew by, conversation flowing. At one point, they had stopped to order a piece of cheesecake to share. It was as if he had known Morgan for a very long time; it felt natural being with her. He needed to see her again, that much was clear to him.

"Would you like to go to dinner on Friday?" The words were out before he could even mull it over.

"I'd like that." Without hesitation, Morgan agreed to meet him again.

Perhaps he should make sure that she was single, that she didn't have a boyfriend first, but he knew instinctively that she wasn't that type of girl. _Luck must be on my side, stumbling across Morgan_ , he mused.

"I had a nice time, meeting you here." Morgan spoke softly, lifting her gaze to meet his.

He reached across the table and held on to her slender hand. Sparks ran through his body and judging from her expression, she felt it too. Feeling like a shy schoolboy, he gulped softly. He didn't want to leave, but knew from the darkness outside that it was getting late.

"Let's get out of here."

After helping Morgan with her jacket, he took hold of her hand, natural as could be, and led her to her car in the moonlit parking lot. Night air created a chill and Morgan shivered slightly. He leaned over and rubbed her arms.

Dammit, this woman created emotions, reactions in him that he'd never experienced. Before he could question it, he impulsively lifted her chin and placed his lips to her soft ones. Groaning to himself, he gently paused, savoring the moment, never wanting it to end.

"Wow." It was a whisper, barely audible.

"Wow." Declan's whisper matched hers. They had exchanged numbers back at the table and Declan knew that it wouldn't be long before he found himself calling her.

"Miss Matthews, have a good night." He attempted to walk away, but it was as if he had no control.

This time the kiss grew more intense as his heart rate increased. Breaking free before he got himself in trouble, he pulled back. "You'd better go or I won't be held responsible for my actions."

This got a strong chuckle out of Morgan. "Good night, Declan Blake." With the blow of a kiss from her hand, she was off.

# CHAPTER TWO

He called for the first time that very night. Just as Morgan was settling down for bed, her mind was wrapped around Declan Blake. This was nothing like it had felt with Sam, even when they had first started dating. No, it was worlds away from anything Morgan had ever experienced. Hearing about love at first sight had seemed utterly ridiculous to her. Never a believer in such nonsense, Morgan grinned widely as she pulled her arms tightly around herself.

The jarring sound of her ringer startled Morgan, snapping her out of her thoughts. Glancing at the caller ID screen, she lit up — his number was programmed in her phone already. Morgan's heart did flip-flops as she took the call.

"Hi, Morgan." The sound of his voice only accelerated her heartbeat more.

"Hey, Declan." Trying to play it cool, she steadied her voice.

"Is it too soon to call? I couldn't wait."

"No, I'm glad you called, really."

Morgan hated all the game playing that surrounded dating and relationships. Friends had inquired about when it was okay to call, how many times per day was acceptable. What did she think about this? Morgan was a firm believer in not playing games. If you felt like picking up the phone and calling, then you should just do it.

"Whew. I'm happy to hear that. I don't play games, Morgan. You should know that about me. I don't want to worry about how it'll look if I call you too soon and all of that nonsense. Life is too short for that."

Clearly, they felt the same about this. That was a good thing. Morgan soon found that she could sit for hours and listen to the sound of his voice.

Before they knew it, summer was upon them and Morgan looked forward to spending the time relaxing. She and Declan were in the process of getting to know one another, complete with all the perks of young love. Tonight he had promised to take her somewhere special to celebrate the end of her school year. What did he have in mind?

One of the things she was coming to understand about Declan was his stubbornness. It came out in ways such as this; she couldn't get him to share his plans for the evening. All he asked was that she dressed casually for the evening and let her inner child out. What was that even supposed to mean?

Patience wasn't her strong suit as she waited for Declan to arrive at her place. Dressed in denim shorts and a blue tank top, she peeked out her living room window. He was here, right on time. She grabbed her bag and ran to the driveway to meet him.

"Hey, beautiful," Declan wrapped his arms around her.

She breathed in his fresh cologne. "Hey."

"Ready to have some fun?"

They walked hand in hand to his truck as she swallowed back her comment. What was the point in asking where they were headed? He would only shake his head in that adorable way and tell her she would find out soon enough.

Classic rock sounded through the speakers of the truck as they rode in silence. Every once in a while, Declan chuckled and then turned his gaze to her, mischief in his eyes. If she wasn't so crazy about him, she just might smack that grin right off his handsome face.

"We're here."

A crowded parking lot lay before them; cars and children were visible in every direction. Signs advertising the fair were generously displayed around the parking area.

A fair? She threw her hands in front of her mouth as she laughed loudly. "Declan! I haven't been to a fair in ages. This is amazing."

"I aim to please," he stated, pulling into a spot on the grassy section of the lot. They would have quite the walk, but who cared when she had Declan by her side?

"Come on, let's grab some popcorn, I'm starving." Declan pulled her across the parking lot, his eyes wide. If she didn't know better, she'd say he was as excited as she was about the night ahead of them.

"What made you decide to bring me here?"

He nodded his head, a grin playing on his lips. "I don't know, Morgan. You kind of make me feel like a kid again. Everything is fresh and new when I'm with you."

What better place to feel like a kid than the fair, complete with all these wild rides that brought back memories of childhood. She understood and felt more than ever that they clicked together.

"Spectacular idea," she shared, clutching his hand a little tighter. She had a feeling tonight would be a night to remember.

Popcorn and cotton candy filled her stomach as they walked from ride to ride. She could handle any of these rides, from the swings to the gravity rides. Fear of heights was a different matter. From the time she was a small child, she had been petrified of heights. Standing before them was a Ferris wheel, a rather high Ferris wheel, even by usual standards.

"What do you think?" Declan raised his eyes to the height of the wheel. _Hell no,_ she wanted to say, but didn't wish to look like a chicken, standing there, a grown woman, afraid of this ride.

"I don't know. I think I've had enough excitement for tonight," she responded as she twirled her fingers through her dark hair.

"Oh, I'm just getting started. The excitement for tonight is far from over. But okay, we'll leave."

Good. He seemed to accept her response without pushing her, but what else was he up to? Declan pulled her close, kissing her head softly. "Scared? It's okay. Everyone has something they're afraid of."

"I'm not..." It was no use; she wouldn't lie to him. "I guess I am."

With a loud sigh, Declan kissed her again.

"Where to now?" She gazed up at his height.

"How does dinner in town at that place by the river sound?"

"Oh, I could never refuse Italian."

It was the place they had their first real date, right after they had met. _Thoughtfulness._ She added the attribute to her growing list of words to describe Declan. Guys from her past were always attentive at first, but then they seemed to show less effort as the relationship continued. Although she and Declan were still getting to know each other, she was convinced this was no act; he was one of those rare men who put themselves last in a relationship.

No place on Earth was better than being with her. The only way their summer could have been better was if he had taken her away on vacation. Unforeseen scheduling conflicts at work prohibited him from getting away from the construction site, but Declan figured he and Morgan had plenty of time for trips in their future. With summer winding down, he realized he had never been happier than he was with Morgan by his side. Together they lay on the small beach on the Hudson River.

"You seem so serious, everything okay?"

He propped himself up on his elbow and ran his fingers through her hair. "Everything is wonderful."

Too wonderful, a nagging voice told him. Negativity wasn't usually something he felt weighed down by; perhaps it was the impending end of summer that made him feel melancholy. Freedom from work allowed Morgan to spend more time with him; she would be heading back to work soon, too tired to keep up with this schedule of seeing each other every day, most likely.

"Liar." Morgan gazed up at him. "You're good at many things, but lying isn't one of them."

No, he supposed she had a point. "I'm crazy about you."

He was a private man who kept his feelings close to him. At this point in their relationship, he loved her. God, how he loved her. But then why hadn't he expressed that to her? He was scared. So heights weren't among his top fears, but sharing his feelings with this amazing woman was right up there. What if she couldn't say the words back to him? Rejection was definitely another fear. He saw it though, in the way he caught her looking at him when she didn't think he was watching.

"I'm crazy about you, too." Her eyes were vulnerable. He loved her, he loved her like no other woman before. Morgan was becoming his best friend and the girl he could picture himself spending his life with.

"Come here," Declan sighed, moving her face closer to him. He kissed her, this woman who evoked so many emotions from him.

"Declan..."

He was wrapped up in the moment, this felt so right. For the first time, his head and his heart were in the same place.

"I love you," he stopped her mid-sentence. "I love you, Morgan."

"I love you, Declan."

He never thought to ask her what she had been about to say to him. It didn't matter now; he held her close, the only sound coming from the gulls overhead. Nothing else mattered.

# CHAPTER THREE

Rising early, Morgan felt a zest for life. Yes, life was good, for she had Declan Blake by her side nearly every day. From that morning at the school months ago, she and Declan had been inseparable.

Heading outside to place some bags for an arts and crafts project in her car, Morgan glanced up at the sky. A clear blue September sky only enhanced her good mood. Humming softly to herself, Morgan locked the door to her house and settled into the car. After sending off a good morning text to Declan, she focused on pulling out of her driveway and headed to work.

It had been a good start to her new school year; the students were adorable and Morgan's mind swirled with ideas for fall projects to kick off the season. Even the mild traffic didn't bother her that morning; she simply turned up the radio and hummed along for the remainder of her commute.

The students arrived on time as usual, and Morgan greeted each and every little face. Taking the lead in the hallway, Morgan glanced back at Elle, who walked beside Molly. The poor little girl was having separation issues with mom at the bus stop each morning. Morgan made it a priority to have that girl smiling — she wouldn't give up until she had succeeded.

"I'm trying, but she is one stubborn cookie," Elle whispered as she ushered the sullen girl to the coat rack.

Morgan winked at Elle as she moved quickly to help settle the other students. The second bell of the morning chimed brightly as Morgan took a silent head count and moved to her attendance book. All the students were present today, so that was a promising start to this bright Tuesday morning.

Just as Morgan glanced up at the large clock on the wall, the morning announcements started. Voices of the students filled the classroom as everyone settled in, taking their places on the colorful rug. A wide smile graced Morgan's face as she clapped, preparing her students for their morning routine.

Cries from the center of the rug stole Morgan's attention. Molly again. _Where is that book about the mother bear and her child?_ Morgan instructed the children to wait a moment as she perused the bookcase, searching for the familiar title. _Ah — there it is._

One of the qualities of a good teacher included being flexible and changing up the schedule when necessary. She knew this book would help ease Molly's separation issues. Minutes later, not only had Molly's expression changed, but most of the other children also appeared more relaxed. So her morning schedule was altered, no big deal. By the time she had asked a variety of comprehension questions relating to the characters and plot of the story, Morgan noted that at least a half an hour had passed.

Just as Morgan prepared for circle time activities, an announcement sounded from the intercom system. Instead of the usual cheerful voice of Mr. Howard, the pleasant-mannered principal, a strained Mr. Howard sounded from the intercom system.

"Teachers, please check your email immediately. I repeat, check your email immediately."

It was unusual for the principal to make such an announcement. Brows etched with concern, Morgan's gaze met with Elle's equally concerned one.

"Check your email." Elle motioned for Morgan to hurry to the computer.

Just as she was signing on, Morgan heard her cell vibrate. It was Declan calling. Should she answer it? Normally, the answer would be no, not during class, but an eerie feeling seeped further into Morgan's bones as she stood, mesmerized, frozen to the spot.

"Miss Matthews!" Elle's voice broke through as Morgan reached slowly for her cell.

"Declan, what's wrong?"

His voice was serious, and his words devastating as he told her what had happened.

"Oh my God." It was barely a whisper as Morgan sank into her chair. "Declan." She snapped her cell phone shut as she captured her breath. Elle rushed to her side.

Declan was in Manhattan, picking up some contracts for his company. Of all the mornings he could have gone down. Somehow she should have known, if only she could have stopped him from going today. Wishful thinking got her nowhere; it was unreasonable to think she could have known, but still.

"What is it?" Elle urged.

"Elle, we've been attacked. Two planes crashed into the towers at the World Trade Center," Morgan whispered.

The blank look of confusion only intensified the surreal feelings scattering around in Morgan's body. This was unreal, like nothing she had ever imagined.

Explaining as briefly as she could without being overheard by the students, Morgan watched as Elle's jaw dropped. This was no time to sit and contemplate the news; this was the time for doing what she did best — taking care of her students.

Without preamble, Morgan instructed Elle to begin the usual morning routine, along with the weather and calendar activities. Elle nodded as Morgan jumped onto her computer with shaky hands to read the plan of action from Principal Howard.

Mrs. Jonson, the building secretary, would be taking care of phone calls to ask parents if they wanted to pick up their children. Teachers were told not to alarm children, but to get them packed and ready to go.

Suddenly, Morgan's mind was on autopilot as she thought of nothing but getting her students home safely. Any outsider would have probably never guessed how anxious both women were on the inside, but as true professionals, Morgan and Elle packed up the students with soothing words and smiles on their faces. Minutes dragged by as Morgan waited for parents to arrive.

Once her students were seated and she had nothing to do but wait, she checked her cell phone. Declan had called again, stating in his message that the Pentagon had been hit and both the south tower and north tower had collapsed. At that point, tensions were high, but somehow Morgan managed to bite back the tears of fear, confusion, and worry as she escorted her last few students to the classroom door for pick up.

Only when they were alone did Morgan reach for Elle and hold her tight. Sobbing into her friend's shoulder, the women wept together. What could they say? What words could possibly describe the swinging range of emotions that were present in the room? Finally, Morgan released Elle and swiped at her own tear-stained face.

"Go, go home. Stay safe," Morgan instructed as her heart pounded.

"I can..." Elle started only to be swiftly interrupted.

"Go, I'll walk out with you." Morgan grabbed her jacket off the back of her desk chair and reached for her bag.

The hallways were silent as the staff members nodded to each other, each seemingly anxious to get home to their loved ones. There was no need for words as Morgan and Elle hugged goodbye in the parking lot.

Blaring sounds startled Morgan, causing her to jolt. Gazing up, fighter jets littered the perfect blue sky. Instinctively, Morgan knew that sky would never look the same to anyone.

Only when she was alone in her car did Morgan allow all of it to sink in. How many people were among the dead? Missing? Weeping quietly, Morgan let herself imagine how those poor, innocent people must have felt, sitting on those planes, working in the offices of the Twin Towers. Honestly, she couldn't begin to imagine, but she could feel for those souls, she could keep them in her prayers.

Even as a small child, her mother stated that Morgan had a sensitive soul, perhaps too sensitive at times. It was just like Morgan to think of all the horrific details that these unfortunate individuals must have gone through. Thoughts of victims, loss, and pain clouded her mind. Through it all, Declan's face was forefront, hushing her, telling her to relax. Declan. She had to hear his voice, had to know that he was safe.

One, two, three endless rings and then he picked up, sounding out of breath. "Morgan."

"Declan, I need to see you." She wouldn't feel safe until she was wrapped in his arms.

"Morgan, I need to see you, too, but I can't, not right now."

_What does he mean?_ She would go wherever he was; it didn't matter. Right now nothing mattered except him.

"I... I can't, honey. I'm staying here." The air went silent.

After a few moments, she found her voice. "What?" But she knew, hell, she knew exactly what that stubborn, heroic man was going to do.

"No, you can't, you can't! It's too dangerous, Declan. I bet you won't even be allowed anywhere near the site." _What is he thinking?_

"My buddy from the NYPD just called. They need all the help they can get. It's not a question, Morgan. I have to help. I need to be there. Listen, cell phone service is spotty, you probably won't be able to reach me anymore."

There was no arguing with him. Finality rung out through his words. Of course he would go, and she would be a fool to try to stop him. Was she being selfish to want to keep him safe? It didn't matter to her at that moment. The only thing that would soothe her aching mind right now would be for him to be at her side.

"Please God, please keep him safe." She hadn't even realized that she had spoken the words aloud.

"I will be safe, please, try to believe that. I'm going to help others, Morgan, please don't be mad."

Morgan knew that he didn't need her being upset, not now. Their relationship had an equal give and take. Morgan stood up for what she believed, and so did Declan. Now was one of those times where she had to let him go.

"Be safe, Declan. God, I love you so much." She breathed.

"And I love you. I'm coming back to you. I _will_ be back."

"I'll be waiting. Should I make you some dinner?"

"Dinner? Honey, all the bridges have been shut down. Most likely I'll be working through the night and crashing at Stephen's place." His friend from the police department, of course. She supposed that made sense.

He would help out forever if he could. If that man didn't need to sleep, he never would. Her heart swelled with love for him. Suddenly, she was proud of Declan Blake, prouder than she ever thought she could feel.

"Go out there, Declan. Go and save those poor people."

Would there be many people left to save? Horrific images of unspeakable horror wracked her brain, over and over.

"Morgan. You do know that I will do whatever it takes to help out here or wherever I may be needed."

She knew that, deep in her heart, she had always known that her Declan was made for bigger things. This was one of the things that she loved most about him.

"I do know that, and I love you for it." Barely a whisper, she ended the call, praying with all her might that her man would come home to her, safe and sound.

Wracked with grief, Declan silently headed for Stephen's apartment. It was late, too late it seemed. With a grimy hand, he reached for his cell phone but remembered he no longer had service. Besides, he didn't want to speak right now, not to anybody. He didn't want to talk at all. Stark visions of destruction and debris rolled into thoughts of the bodies he had witnessed — things nobody should ever have to see in an entire lifetime.

He'd be back bright and early tomorrow to continue the search for remains and signs of human life at the awful place they were starting to refer to as ground zero. His brain still couldn't wrap around the fact that humans could be so destructive and cruel to one another. Tears streamed down his face — tears for those lost, those left behind, and tears for the future of the entire country. It wouldn't be the same, not after this.

Silence was deafening on the streets of Manhattan. Images of soot and smoke had pounded the streets of the city today, turning bright, sunny skies to deadly, consuming darkness. He would call Morgan when he arrived at the apartment, but he would spare her the horrors witnessed today; of those he would never speak.

It seemed like hours before he finally made it to the small couch in the tiny living room. Bone tired, he knew that Stephen still had hours to go before he was due to arrive home. Despite his exhaustion, he made the promised call to let Morgan know that he was okay. He grabbed Stephen's landline phone and breathed.

The sound of her voice instantly brought him to tears. Holding them back, he spoke firmly. "Hi, Morgan."

"Declan! You're okay." From the sound of her voice, she hadn't slept much either.

"I'm at Stephen's place. Listen, I needed to tell you that I'm safe and I wanted to hear your voice. I'm going to say goodnight. It's been a long night." His voice was hushed; suddenly it took every ounce of his energy to speak.

"Oh, okay. I love you." Morgan's voice was a mere squeak.

"I love you, too." He did with all his heart.

After a quick shower to wash away the dust and grime, Declan threw on a t-shirt and settled onto the lumpy couch. This was a bachelor pad for sure.

Shadows played across the room. _Who were those people? Did they have husbands, wives and children waiting for them at home?_ Realizing that those lost at ground zero would never make it home again brought fresh tears to his eyes. That night, sleep never came.

# CHAPTER FOUR

He was never quite the same after those long days and nights at ground zero. Sure, he smiled and laughed, but it was as if something deep inside him had died a little. Recurring nightmares of planes dropping from the sky, faces of souls that were too late to save bombarded him each and every night. Morgan knew this without Declan saying a word. Soft whimpers and fluttering behind his closed eyes broke her heart every time.

Morgan stood by his side and loved him with all she had. Declan wanted to fight for his country, fight for all the wrongs done, but he hadn't been called into duty yet. In her heart, Morgan feared for the day that he would be called into action. However, in her head, she knew it might be just what he needed to fight those demons off. It was several months after 9/11 and Declan remained haunted by the lost souls of ground zero.

It was a cold winter morning and Morgan could think of nothing that she would like better than to snuggle up close to Declan. He had a fire going in his basement fireplace.

"What do you say we go to our place tonight?"

Glancing up at him, Morgan beamed.

"Really?" Morgan asked. "With Stephen and his date?"

Morgan didn't mind sharing Declan with his friend tonight. Besides, she was curious about Stephen's new date. It was amazing how every time she saw him, there was a new woman. Dating lots of different people had never been something she was interested in doing. Luck had graced her with Declan and she couldn't be happier.

"No, it's just the two of us tonight. Stephen cancelled so I thought we'd get a table in the wine cellar. You like that room, right?" A smile teased Declan's lips as he gazed at Morgan.

"I love that room. It's dark and romantic." Cuddling closer, Morgan planted a kiss on Declan's warm cheek. He smelled of fresh aftershave.

"Good, good." He pulled her closer still and they lay content in each other's arms. Right then, Morgan considered herself the luckiest woman in the world.

"Declan?" Twirling her hair slightly, she knew that the approaching topic may ruin the mood in the room, but she was helpless to stop the words from tumbling out of her mouth. It was on her mind constantly.

"Yeah?" Staring off into space, Declan's eyes remained glued to the ceiling.

"What are you going to do if... you know?"

"No, Morgan, I _don't_ know."

The world was in turmoil, terrorism a constant silent threat. Threat levels were given code colors — yellow, orange — depending upon the day.

"Say it, Morgan, just say it." Declan blew out a breath.

Sitting up straight, she clutched the blanket to her chest. "Okay, I'll just come out and say it." Pouting a bit, she gathered up her words.

"Go right ahead."

"Okay, well... What if they call you to go in?"

"You already know the answer to that question. I have no choice."

His mother's health had been deteriorating. She was becoming forgetful and since Declan was the only family close by, he checked in on her on a daily basis. Morgan had heard of the soldiers who were permitted to stay home because of such circumstances. Whenever she had mentioned this possibility, he brushed it aside. He felt it was his duty to go, bottom line.

Stubborn to the core, that man was. "So you'd just go? Up and leave, possibly to never return?"

"And what's the alternative? Don't go?" Now he was sitting up, eye level with Morgan.

"Well, yes. You could try to get out of it. Plenty of men will go, I'm sure." Knowing how that sounded before she had a chance to pull the words back, Morgan bit her lip hard. It was definitely the wrong thing to say.

"Oh, sure, so it's fine for somebody _else's_ boyfriend, husband, or son to go, but I should just stay out of it. Is that right?" His voice rose, a telltale sign that Declan was becoming agitated.

"No, but..."

"No, but what? Do you hear yourself?"

He had her there. What could she say? "It's just that I love you so much, and I don't want to lose you!" Morgan was up, pacing the room, blanket wrapped tightly around her. He stayed put, shaking his head ever so slightly.

"You knew what you were getting into when you met me, Morgan. We've been through this a hundred times. This is part of me, part of who I am."

Closing in on him, Morgan knelt and took hold of his face. "Dammit, I know that. Don't you think I know that? But who would have thought that all of these changes would have happened?"

"Nobody would have thought any of this would happen, but it did, Morgan, it did!" he yelled, grasping for her hands.

And so it went; it seemed that this topic was recurring, and it was one where neither could see the other's side clearly.

"Obviously, I'm not going to get through that thick skull of yours, am I?" Morgan pleaded with her eyes.

Gazing right back into her stare, Declan shook his head firmly.

"It's not like you're even sure you'll ever have to go, right?" It was silly, really, now that she thought about all the precious time being wasted by this conversation.

Declan didn't answer her, but took her head his strong hands and closed in for a firm kiss on her lips. The kiss spoke of agitation and frustration at first. Then it became softer, melting a bit with each breath until Morgan could only see him, taste him. Her heart and soul were firmly attached to this man; they were soul mates, in every sense of the word. Yes, the man drove her crazy at times such as these, but honestly, she wouldn't have him any other way.

Soft music filled the air as Morgan sat with Declan in the dark, inviting cellar. A fire roared in the hearth, crackling with warmth. Glancing around, Morgan took in the other diners in the room — some young, some older — but they all seemed content to spend the evening with their dates. Feeling the same, Morgan reached forward and grasped onto Declan's hand.

"You look beautiful tonight, Morgan."

If she wasn't careful, she could get lost in his eyes. "And you, Mr. Blake, look very handsome yourself."

Conversation was a bit slow for the couple that usually filled the air with chatter about this or that. It was fine with her; perhaps they were just growing more accustomed to each other, more comfortable, without the need for small talk.

After finishing up their main courses, the jovial waiter approached to clear the table. Morgan had been looking forward to one of their desserts all evening. Atalino's was famous for their crème brûlée.

"That's odd, usually they ask if we want dessert about now." Also famous for their impeccable service, Morgan was stumped.

"I'm sure he'll be back. Relax." His eyes were serious, probing. Morgan felt there was something that Declan wanted to say, something he was nervous about.

"Are you okay, honey?" She made small circles on his palms with her thumbs.

"Couldn't be better." His gaze remained fixed on her.

The heat of the fireplace must have been getting to her; she suddenly felt uncharacteristically shy around him. Fanning herself with her hand, she sat back and released a breath.

"What are you staring at?" Her eyes were wide.

A chuckle escaped Declan as he reached for her hands once more. "Boy, there's nothing that doesn't get past you."

"What does that mean?" It was a strange comment.

Just then, the waiter swept by and placed a crème brûlée and champagne glasses down at their table.

"How did he...?" Morgan glanced at the waiter who quietly stepped out of the room. How did she not notice that other diners had gradually left the room and that she and Declan were now the only ones left?

"Shh, Morgan."

Taking her hand, Declan stood. Morgan followed suit and rose to meet him. Declan guided her toward the popping fireplace, a slight grin playing on his lips. Clueless, Morgan went along with him, stopping when they were standing before the fire.

Declan sat on the stone ledge and Morgan sat beside him. As if in slow motion, he reached into his pocket. Gasping before even spying the small black box, Morgan's hands rose to meet her mouth.

"Morgan Matthews, you are my soul mate. There's nobody who could ever touch what we have. Will you spend the rest of your life with me? Will you marry me?"

Squealing with delight, her words could barely be contained until he finished speaking. "Yes! Yes, Declan, a million times, yes! I will be honored to be your wife."

Slipping the sparkling diamond and platinum band onto her ring finger, his eyes shone with adoration. Melting into his arms, she didn't care if anybody walked down to the cellar. She kissed this wonderful man like they'd been kept apart for ages. Tears streamed down both of their faces as they finally stopped to gaze at each other.

"Morgan, I don't think I could possibly love you any more than I do, right now at this very moment, but something tells me that I'm going to grow to love you more with each passing year."

It was simply the sweetest thing that anybody had ever said to her. "What did I do to deserve you?" She couldn't wait to get home and be alone with him.

# CHAPTER FIVE

Staring at his reflection in the mirror, he wondered for the hundredth time since that night back at the restaurant how he was going to tell her. How could he break her heart, crush her? The decision wasn't even his; the time had come to stand up and fight for his country.

When the call had come a few days ago, he knew before he even picked up his phone. He was to head out to Afghanistan in a month. A month, that was all the time he had. Part of him was excited; part of him was scared to death.

Plans for proposing to Morgan had been forefront in his mind, but when he got the call, he knew that he wanted to take that next step. Perhaps the right thing to do would have been to tell her first, before proposing, but he was worried that she'd say no. Maybe she didn't want to get attached to a man who may never return home. Raking a hand through his hair, he paused as he took in his unkempt appearance. _Be a man,_ he told himself.

Morgan was on her way over. He had called her, asking her to stop by after work, saying that he needed to see her. Leave it to Morgan, she responded with a million questions, all of which he put off the best he could. _No need to start the argument before she even walks through the door_.

Time stalled as he waited and waited. A hard knock sounded at the door as his belly did flip-flops. Releasing a pent up breath, he meandered to the front door. Placing his hand gently on the doorknob, he sighed and summoned the courage to open the door. Something inside him told him that this battle may very well be worse than any on the battlefield.

"Morgan, come in," he stated flatly, avoiding eye contact.

"That's a rather formal welcome, wouldn't you say?" Although smiling, suspicion arose in her gaze.

"Come, Morgan. Take a seat, please." Gesturing toward the couch, he solemnly took a seat next to her and held his breath.

"Whatever it is, why don't you just come out and say it?" Drumming her fingertips on her lap, Morgan's eyes bored into his.

"Morgan, you know how much I love you, don't you?" His rehearsed speech began, just like he had practiced over and over again that morning.

Jumping back like she'd been stung by a bee, Morgan's jaw dropped open. "Oh my God, oh my God! You're leaving, aren't you?"

"Morgan, I..." Forgetting what he had planned to say next, he threw his speech out the window. "Morgan, you knew this day would come. You had to know it."

She was on her feet, pacing the floor, hands wildly gesturing. "But _now_? After we've just become engaged? We're going to be a family!"

He knew if he just got her to calm down that she would see the light.

"Morgan, we're a family already. Just take a breath..."

She was on him in a flash. "Don't you dare tell me to take a breath! Don't you dare tell me not to be upset, Declan Blake! I won't lose you, not now."

He wanted to wipe away the tears that flowed freely down her cheeks. When he reached for her, she swatted him away, continuing her rant. "I can't believe you. You could have tried to stay, but you didn't. I can't _believe_ what you're doing!"

There it was again. How did she expect him to even attempt to back out? He would keep tabs on his mother and ensure that she had the proper care if need be. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't go to Afghanistan.

"I'll be back. I promise you." But he should have never said those words, never. He had no right to make that promise to her.

"Don't..." Turning away, she covered her mouth with her hands and dropped to the floor. Moments later, her voice quivered as she asked, "When? How much time do you have?"

Stooping down to be at her side, he fingered her hair gently and kissed the top of her head. "I leave in a month."

"A _month_?" Mournful eyes met his and she then glanced away, eyes averting him.

"A month."

Silently, he willed her to understand. He knew that she would eventually, with time. Morgan's posture straightened as she wrapped her arms around him and sobbed into his shoulder. No words were needed; he just held her for what seemed like an eternity.

After all her tears had dried, she pushed herself slightly away from Declan. "When did you find out, Declan?"

He should have known that she was going to ask. Funny thing, he wasn't prepared for that question, and Declan wasn't a lying man. "Right before I proposed to you," he murmured, shielding himself against the certain storm.

She was on her feet in a flash. " _What? What_ did you say?" she hissed through clenched teeth.

Declan stood and attempted to close the distance between them. She shoved her way to the front door and Declan gave up the fight, knowing she just needed time to cool off. She would be back; she always came back. With a swift slam of the door, she was gone.

Normally, if they argued, Morgan would sometimes reappear within seconds, minutes. Knowing the seriousness of this argument, he visibly drooped, not expecting her to be back for a while. It needed to be said, sooner rather than later. He was breaking her heart, he knew that he was, and it killed him, but was there any other way?

Resigned to the fact that he would move heaven and earth to make the next month with her memorable and special, anxiety seeped in with worries that she might not want to stick this out. Was it possible that Morgan would leave him over this? It was something that he hadn't considered seriously, but given the way she was behaving, it had him concerned.

She couldn't sleep. How could she sleep when Declan had just slammed her with his news? Now, right after they had just become engaged? How dare he do this to her? It was as if he had taken a hammer and smashed her heart into splintering pieces. Crying wouldn't solve anything; besides, she was angry still, but she knew the tears would come.

With a heavy sigh, she lifted her comforter and stepped out of bed. At this point in their relationship, they usually spent most nights together, either at his place or hers. She missed having him beside her. There was no way she would sleep. Damn him.

As if her mind were on autopilot, she raced out of the front door and hopped into her car. In the back of her mind, she knew that it wasn't a good idea to be driving when she was so upset. Easing a bit off the gas, she tried to slow her breathing and see the big picture. The big picture was dismal. _Ugh! Why would you do this? Just when we were starting our lives together?_ It would probably be a good idea not to think about her dilemma at all, not while she was driving. Moments later, she pounded fiercely on the steering wheel. So much for that idea.

Just a few more blocks and she would be at his place. The winding road landed her at his driveway. Glancing at the house, she could see that his basement apartment was bathed in darkness. Apparently he had no trouble sleeping tonight. Just the thought of him sleeping, after all that had transpired, infuriated her further.

Fingering the cold, metal key to his apartment, Morgan stealthily entered the dark room. As she prepared to wake Declan, she heard quiet sobs in the darkness. All anger disappeared as she moved in the black night to find him.

Within seconds, she melted into his arms, now sobbing with him. As they clung to each other, he whispered over and over how much he loved her, how he couldn't stand hurting her.

What had she done? My God, this man was beyond courageous, willing to fight and risk his life for their country and here she was, angry at him. What kind of person was she?

Sweeping his full hair through her fingers, she soothed him with a kiss. The kiss was sad, desperate even. How could she let this man take off and leave her? How could she live with herself if she forced him to reconsider?

Breaking the melancholy kiss, Morgan whispered in his ear. "Declan Blake, I'm an idiot. I love you, and I'm not going anywhere. I support you, and I'm sorry to give you such a hard time. Please forgive me."

Although the darkness cloaked his features, she could just about make out the sadness in his gaze.

"Forgive _you?_ "

"Yes, I've been an ass." Nervous laughter escaped her.

"Morgan, I'll never let you down. I love you."

This time, their kiss smoldered as their hands found each other in the darkness, caressing each other, peace found at last.

# CHAPTER SIX

Gray skies overhead threatened his mood. Pounding his feet over and over on the pavement was a lame attempt to squash his troubles. Exercise helped to clear his mind at times, which was why he had recently taken up running again, an old high school activity. True to his word, he savored every waking moment with Morgan as the weeks passed.

Part of his heart was with Morgan; the other part was ready to fight the war on terrorism. He was torn between the sweetness of Morgan and the desire to avenge the wrongdoings and stand up for his country. Knowing that he very well may have to give up his own life trying to defend his country was a decision that he could live with. Every day he prayed for peace and for a safe deployment.

As far as his relationship with Morgan went, they were growing closer by the day, something that he didn't think was even possible. Every time he thought he loved that woman as much as he could, his love kept growing.

He had a surprise in store for her and like a child waiting for Christmas morning, he couldn't wait to tell her what he had planned. He had every single detail planned out, and it was pretty perfect, if he did say so himself.

At last he finished his laps around the block he lived on. If he had the time, he would have kept running, but a stir of the sauce he had prepared early that afternoon and a quick shower was in order before Morgan arrived at his place. Steaming hot water soothed his body and felt amazing after his chilly run.

Glancing at his bedside alarm clock as he was getting dressed, he felt that familiar excitement, knowing that his girl was to arrive soon. A quick tap on the door broke his thoughts as he hustled to the living room. Morgan appeared, wrapped in her dark green scarf and black pea coat. A smile escaped as he imagined her reaction to the news. Would she jump up and grab him? Yell?

"What's gotten into you?" Morgan shook off the cold and walked toward him, a grin playing on her soft lips.

"Come here, you." As he held out his arms, she wrapped herself in his embrace. Smooth, dark locks covered her eyes. He pushed her hair to the side so he could see her face. There was no doubt in his mind that he was making the right decision.

"In the mood for something to eat?" One of the things that Declan prided himself on was making a divine tomato sauce, or gravy, as he knew it was often referred to in Italy.

"Are you kidding? This is what you've been up to all day?" Morgan teased him again for his ability to make a near perfect gravy. "How does a guy who's one hundred percent Irish pull this off?"

The familiar push and pull of their relationship put him at ease.

"Just because someone is part Italian doesn't mean they can automatically make a good sauce. Look at you, for example." With a quick wink, he pulled her closer.

"Hey, watch it!"

One thing that Morgan would openly admit was her lack of experience in the kitchen. She simply couldn't cook and he couldn't care less. Her other attributes far outweighed her lack of skills in the kitchen.

"One of these days I'll teach you how to cook. You'll be a master chef." Declan delighted in teasing her.

"Oh really? Who's the teacher here?" Morgan teased right back, heading for the pot of sauce. Stirring it lightly, she brought the large wooden spoon to her mouth for a taste before burning her tongue slightly on the hot liquid. "Ouch!" She giggled, stepping back. Declan was close behind.

"That's what you get! You're going to spoil your appetite." He playfully swatted her bottom with a dishtowel, causing her to whoop.

Hands in the air, Morgan surrendered and grabbed a bottle of red wine from the fridge. Most people would never consider drinking red wine chilled, but Morgan and Declan had tried it out by accident one cold night when Declan had forgotten to grab the bottle from his truck. Morgan and he had savored the most delicious pinot noir that night. Now it was their little tradition to chill their wine.

"Would you care for a glass?" Morgan asked as she reached for the wineglasses in a cupboard above the sink.

He could stand there and watch her for hours.

"But of course." Winking as Morgan turned around, Declan pondered over the right moment to share his news.

They only had about a week left before he departed for Afghanistan and it weighed heavily on his mind with each passing day. If only he could suspend time, savor it with Morgan a bit more. For reasons that Declan couldn't put into words, there was a building anxiety wrapped up in his quickly approaching trip to Afghanistan.

It was unfamiliar territory for Declan to feel this stress in any situation. Normally he kept things neatly in perspective. He didn't like this uneasiness that plagued him recently. Danger didn't even enter his mind as much as a fear that he may never lay eyes on Morgan again.

Who knew how long he would need to stay? Very often men would extend their required time, even if they were permitted to return home. He would like to say that given the choice, he would return to Morgan in a heartbeat. But it wasn't that simple; it never was. If he had the opportunity to make a difference, he wasn't so sure that he would deny his country. So this was it. Take these precious days with Morgan, and build memories to keep him sane for the next several months.

"What's on your mind?" Morgan snuck up on him, causing him to jump slightly.

"Sit, please." Clearing his throat, Declan hoped she would be as excited as he was. "Just a minute." After pounding down the hallway, Declan grabbed the envelope on his dresser.

Delightful aromas of sauce and Morgan's perfume filled the air as he returned to the kitchen. Morgan was sitting at the table, waiting with wide eyes and an even wider grin playing on her lips.

"What do you have there?" Rushing over to him, she swiped the envelope from his hands.

"Open it."

The woman looked like a child on Christmas morning. Delicately, as if wanting to prolong the surprise, she sat. He grabbed a seat beside her and watched. Confusion and then joy registered as Morgan jumped up and grabbed Declan in a giant embrace.

"Really? We're going to Florida?" It was worth every dime he'd spent to see how thrilled she was with the trip.

"Pack your bags, baby. We're headed out for a long weekend, just you and me." Their flight was scheduled for the following evening, right after Morgan got off work.

"Wait a minute. This is wonderful, but Declan, I can't just call in to work. I mean there are plans to write..."

"It's all taken care of," he stated smugly.

"But how?" Morgan's jaw dropped. "How on earth did you..." She stared at him with her big, brown eyes.

"Let's just say that Elle is a very good friend."

A very good friend indeed. She had taken care of letting their principal know and a substitute teacher was already lined up for Thursday and Friday. Elle had even taken the liberty of writing sub plans since she knew the routine and curriculum almost as well as Morgan did. Morgan was right, Elle really should get her certification as a teacher; she was born to be one.

"Wow. I don't know what to say, you're... you're awesome." Morgan stammered.

"Just say that you love me, and you can't wait to spend every waking moment with me for the next few days."

"I love you and I can't wait to spend every waking moment with you." Morgan twirled and then picked up her wine glass and raised it for a toast.

"You smart ass. To you and me. May we have a very happy trip and a happier life together."

As Declan raised his own glass in the toast, his stomach knotted with apprehension. Swallowing his anxiety, he let the cool, smooth liquid reach his belly. Declan pushed his negative thoughts to the side and concentrated on the dark-haired beauty that was to become his wife.

Warm, sunny skies were just what they needed after the cold New York winter. It was just warm enough to take a dip in the motel pool, then they would shower and head out to dinner. It was their last night together before heading back to New York; she would always remember this trip, no matter what their future held. More and more lately, she caught herself gazing at Declan, as if trying to take a snapshot of the memory and hold onto it forever.

How was she going to say goodbye to him in a few days, knowing that things may never be the same? Declan told her not to worry, but it wouldn't be the same. Those very words were what she feared most. A nagging voice told her that his deployment might change the very essence of their relationship. She loved their relationship just the way it was, couldn't imagine life without him.

Another worry was that he could possibly return, but that inside he would be different, harder, more jaded. Those days at ground zero plagued him still; his nightmares were still present. Half the time, Morgan didn't even mention them. If Declan woke and forgot the terrors he had witnessed over and over again in his sleep, then what was the point of reminding him? Her stubborn man refused therapy, stating he never believed that therapy worked and that it was just a waste of time and money. Poor Declan, she would do anything to erase his pain.

"Ready to head in?" Declan stood with her towel in his hand. She reached for him, preserving the image of him standing there by the pool, sun shining in his eyes.

"Yup."

Hand in hand, they walked over to the small motel room they shared. Neither spoke as the air was filled with chirping insects and uncertainty. Morgan sensed that Declan was nervous about his deployment. It was odd to see because he never appeared to be worried about anything; he was a rock. Not that she blamed him; anybody would most certainly feel a wide array of emotions in his situation.

"Morgan?" He broke her concentration.

"Mm?"

Stopping short of their room, Declan placed light pressure on her arms. "Can you promise me something?" His eyes were hopeful.

"Sure."

"Promise me that for tonight, just tonight, we let go of any worries and just enjoy being us, together."

If only she could, there would be nothing better. "Yes, Declan." She would try her best to put any worries aside.

Declan's dark blue eyes sparkled like a small child's. For the briefest of moments, she imagined him as a boy, pure and innocent. That made her remember, Declan would have to say goodbye to his mom also. It would be difficult for both him and Mrs. Blake. Mrs. Blake doted upon her son, and Declan was very close to her. Unfortunately, Mrs. Blake was starting to become increasingly forgetful, something that worried Declan.

Morgan had promised that she would keep an eye on his mom, and she meant it. Mrs. Blake lived only about twenty minutes from her place; she would make a point of stopping by as often as she could.

The woman was a saint; taking care of her husband from the time she was forty years old when Mr. Blake had suffered from a stroke until the day he died, so many years later. Declan's dad had been paralyzed and needed around-the -clock care.

Declan had such pride in his mother, but shared how he wished she hadn't missed out on her own life by putting his father first for most of her adult life. He had even winced when Morgan had once shared that she would do the very same thing for him if she were in his mom's place.

"I'll race you to the shower," Declan challenged. With a wide grin, he hurried to the door and beat her inside.

# CHAPTER SEVEN

A slight breeze made the night perfect. Morgan glowed from head to toe, looking simply adorable in her snug denim shorts. Declan couldn't pry his eyes away from her. Loud chatter, pop music, and scents of sinful fried food rose in the air, reminding Declan of the many delights of his childhood. He leaned over to hear what Morgan was trying to tell him.

"The Ferris wheel?" Declan glanced up at the height of the ride. Unsure whether it was a good idea, he shook his head. "But I thought you were afraid of heights." He was sure that Morgan had mentioned her fear more than once.

"I am, but I figured with you I'd be safe. Who knows, maybe you'll cure me of my fear."

Gazing at the wheel's height once more, Declan figured this was one of the highest Ferris wheels he'd seen. "I don't know... I'm not sure..."

"Come on!" Leading him by the hand, Morgan's smile held the exuberance of a small child. He couldn't deny her the opportunity to get over one of her fears, now could he?

"All right, all right." As they approached the ride, the smell of salt water from the ocean filled the air. Declan made a mental note to take a walk by the pier with Morgan once the ride was over.

They handed the attendant their tickets for the ride and waited for the next seat to stop at the bottom. Morgan appeared positively terrified as Declan kept a firm hold on her hand. "It's all in your mind, Morgan. Think of something else. Think of a time when you're happy, peaceful."

"Easy for you to say." Morgan gulped, pressing the palm of her hand to his.

The heavy beat of music pounded in the air as Morgan gripped Declan's hand tighter. Rising from the ground, their seat tilted back and forth, gently rocking as Morgan cried out and hid her face in Declan's shirt while clutching the bar in front of her.

"Relax, honey." He pulled her in closer, smoothing her long, wavy hair. "Think of a calm, relaxing place."

"Do I have to open my eyes?" Morgan asked with eyes shut tight.

Laughing softly, Declan chided, "Not if you don't want to, but if I were you, I'd take a peek." The view was spectacular; twinkling lights from the pier met the smooth, dark ocean.

Morgan opened her eyes slightly at first, then gasped and opened them wider at the view. "Declan! It's... it's beautiful." Her voice was a whisper, barely heard above the music and laughter coming from the pier below.

Not sure if it was something about her or the moment, but Declan would swear right then and there that he would never forget this night on the Ferris wheel, when Morgan had tried to conquer her fear, when he fell even more madly in love with her.

The music slowed and he leaned over, touching her face, gently at first, guiding her chin toward his lips. He sighed as he kissed her, all thoughts of fears on his part long gone. He didn't care what happened to him now; he would be a happy man with this memory inside him.

Morgan gazed up, her eyes boring into his. "I want this to be our wedding song."

It was a simple statement that took him by surprise. He had been so wrapped up in Morgan that the only thing his senses registered was her — just Morgan.

Listening carefully, he nodded and hummed along to the familiar tune. "Someone like you..." Van Morrison's soothing lyrics and melody became permanently etched in his mind. Morgan never spoke of wedding plans; she had stated that they would have plenty of time to plan when he arrived home. This was out of character, but then again, it was as if magic filled the air tonight.

"You got it." He kissed her again, this time with more passion, as if nothing else in the world mattered. Before long, they were stopped at the bottom of the ride. "Still afraid?"

"With you by my side? Never." Morgan's eyes were consumed with passion for him. He brushed her swollen lips with his thumb and caught his breath.

Leading her off the ride with unsteady feet, Declan's heart pounded. "Want to take a walk?"

Morgan nodded, grasping onto his hand. He led her to the end of the pier and down the steps to the beach. It was just the two of them, with the sound of the waves crashing. They sat and stared at the water, neither wanting to break the spell.

After a few moments, Declan studied Morgan's dark silhouette. This woman had him completely; she had his heart. He had never felt quite like this and he was sure that he never would again with any other woman. Words couldn't touch his emotions right now.

"Morgan?" he finally said, his voice rising.

"Yes."

"Do you feel this? What I'm feeling right now?'

She leaned closer, taking his hand and pulling it up to her cheek, Morgan then placed her lips on his. When their kiss ended, Morgan turned to him. "It's amazing."

She melted into his arms and he couldn't imagine being happier or wanting anything more.

That night, just days ago, was long gone. Her emotions were playing tricks on her — up, down, and everything in between. As she drove to the airport with Declan and his mom, it took everything she had not to break down right then and there in the car.

Mrs. Blake was chattering nervously, or so it seemed. Quite honestly, some of the things she was saying weren't making much sense. At one point she was referencing some event from Declan's childhood. Something about an old family dog, a German Shepard named Willy. She could understand why Declan was so worried.

"You remember how you used to bring that dog everywhere with you, Declan? To the store, even to school one day?"

They had all laughed at that comment. Declan and his mom then conversed back and forth a bit about something else. Honestly, Morgan was having a hard time following the conversation. Her mind was focused on missing him, God, how she would miss how he sounded, smelled...

"Did you remember to let him out before we left?" Mrs. Blake chirped suddenly.

That caught Morgan's attention. Watching Declan as she drove up the ramp to the airport terminal, their gazes locked. Morgan could see the concern etched upon his face.

"Mom. Willy is no longer here. He died when I was a teenager." His words were firm, yet gentle.

Mrs. Blake made a clucking sound and giggled softly, "Silly. Of course he did."

The response didn't make Morgan feel any better, and she could tell that Declan was not put at ease. She had promised Declan a hundred times that she would look after his mom. Catching his eye in the rear view mirror, she nodded to him.

They had arrived at the terminal. This was it. She wouldn't see him home for good in at least six months, possibly more. Stepping out of the car, she was prepared to say her goodbyes here in the parking area, so that his mom wouldn't have to walk far with her aching knees and to avoid parking fees. What was the difference, anyway? Why prolong the agony?

Tears sprang from her eyes as Declan clung to his mother and whispered something in her ear. Mrs. Blake chuckled, then cried out for him. It was heartbreaking. He gently helped his mother into the passenger seat. It was now her turn for goodbye.

How she wished for that beautiful, breezy evening on the Ferris wheel. He had helped her fear of heights that night, and God, if only he could help her now. This was going to be much harder that she had even imagined.

"Oh, Declan!" she cried out. This was wrong, she had promised herself that she wouldn't make him feel bad or add to his heartache.

"Come here, sweetheart." Open arms swept her in, and she pressed herself close, so close that she breathed in the smell of him, his signature aftershave. "Be brave. I love you. I already consider you to be my wife, you know." She couldn't bear to look at him or tear herself away. "Someone like you..."

He remembered. Softly, he sang the lyrics and kissed the top of her head, rocking along with her.

Finally he released her then swiftly pulled her in again, kissing her one last time. "Hold the fort down, huh? Please check in on Mom. I'll call as often as I can and I'll write."

"Go, Declan, go, before I don't let go."

He let go of her and then came back for one more kiss.

"I mean it. Go. I love you more than anything, Declan Blake." She could barely manage the words.

With a deep breath, she imprinted his image leaving, walking away, and turning back one last time to meet her gaze. Right then and there, she swore that she would never give her heart to anyone else as long as she lived.

Sucking in a deep breath, she wiped her eyes, got in the driver's seat, and buckled her seatbelt. Glancing back in the rear view mirror, before she pulled away, she searched the crowd for Declan, but he was gone.

# CHAPTER EIGHT

Letters — she never thought in this day and age that she and Declan would be writing letters to each other. Emailing, yes, but now their relationship consisted of letters and occasional phone calls. It was like they were long-distance lovers.

She had tried to make the most of a bad situation. In times when her spirits were brighter, she considered their relationship to be romantic and she cherished each letter. Other times she wondered if they were star-crossed lovers, destined to a doomed love. She was just surviving, going through the motions of her work life, waiting for the mail to arrive.

Four long months — the four months that had already passed had seemed unbearable, but she knew it would be so much longer before she would see him, hold him again.

She shouldn't have complained, for once the letters stopped coming, she prayed for just one more. One more letter or phone call, just so that she would know he was okay. How had checking her mailbox obsessively now become part of her daily life?

Time without hearing from him spanned to several weeks. What worried her most was how Mrs. Blake's health was deteriorating and Declan hadn't been in contact with his mom once during this time. Declan's mom had moved down south to an assisted living home to be near her friend, but Morgan was seriously concerned that she would need more care than the facility provided. Declan had previously shared that his deceased aunt had willed her house to his family, it was close to the nursing home. She felt sad that Mrs. Blake wasn't independent enough to stay there on her own, even though it was currently rented. Regardless of how he felt about her, Declan would never forget about his mother.

She re-read each letter from Declan, searching for signs of unhappiness with the status of their relationship. If anything, the most current letters expressed more love than before. This made her very nervous; his silence was killing her.

It was a rare occasion when Morgan picked up the telephone and dialed the familiar number. After several rings, her mother picked up. God, she must be desperate.

"Mom," she stated.

The pause was noticeable. "Oh. Hi, dear."

How was this going to make her feel better? Her mom was so uptight, and she'd only met Declan a handful of times.

"Mom, I wanted to talk to someone. I'm kind of having a hard time over here."

Elle would have been the better choice, but she'd talked this through with her friend many times over the course of the past few weeks. Besides, Elle was at a play tonight, unavailable to speak with.

"Really? What is it, dear?" Her tone was clipped, as if she had taken her mother away from something more important.

"It's Declan, Mom. He's... I haven't heard from him in weeks and I'm really starting to freak out." Morgan exclaimed. _Please, don't say anything to upset me even more, please._

"I don't know what to say to you, honey. I mean, you knew what you were dealing with when you met him. I'm sorry you're hurting and I hope he's well, but really, what else can I say?"

Was she kidding? What Morgan should have done was asked to speak with her step-dad. That would have been the smart choice. Right now, she was seriously concerned that she would say something to her mother she may regret for the rest of her life. Her finger pushed the button to end the call. Her mom wouldn't call her back; that much she could be sure of. Why she even expected anything from her mother at this point in her life was a question she asked herself countless times.

Weeks passed and there had still been no word from Declan. His silence had sparked an investigation on her part. She was determined to get answers, no matter the outcome. What could be worse than not knowing? It was the only thing she could do to save her sanity. Days had been so long and nights longer, for each night she had to lie in the bed they used to share together.

Trying to reach the base had been an exercise in futility; she was told over and over again that only family could have information regarding Sergeant Declan Blake. Explaining that she was to marry him when he returned, that she would be his wife, did no good. She would have to contact Mrs. Blake again to see if she knew what was going on. Morgan hated to upset his mom and had made light of her recent concerns regarding Declan's whereabouts.

That dreary gray day was etched in Morgan's mind. She had placed a phone call to Mrs. Blake, only to be left with a series of long, cold rings. Morgan had become obsessive that morning, ringing his mother's number non-stop until bedtime. Suddenly she couldn't get in touch with either of them.

No word from mother or son. Morgan informed her principal that she had an emergency situation that she must attend to in Florida. Morgan had secured a flight early that afternoon, her thoughts tied up in worry and anxiety. Knowing the moment she approached Mrs. Blake's door that something was wrong, Morgan continued knocking upon her door, incessantly, until an elderly man approached her.

"Mrs. Blake isn't home, dear. Didn't you know? She was taken to a nursing home. She's not well."

It was at the nursing home, that very same night that Morgan had been told by the nurses that attempts to reach Declan were unsuccessful. The expression on the nurse's face confirmed her deepest fears. She could only assume that Declan had died in the line of duty.

Morgan had continued to call the Army base, but no information would be given out to her, she wasn't family after all. Internet searches turned up nothing. And how had Mrs. Blake deteriorated so quickly? Declan's mom didn't even recognize her. Deciding to stay the rest of the week, each visit to Mrs. Blake was darker than the one before. Shutting the dreary place out of her mind had been the only thing to do for the sake of her own sanity.

Clouds scattered overhead, cries of gulls bringing back another time, a different memory, sitting here with Declan by her side. Morgan squeezed her jaw, fighting back the pain.

Months later, there was still no word from Declan. On the Internet, she had searched out his name relentlessly but there was no mention of Declan, no death certificates and his name couldn't be found on any list of casualties of the war. It was as if he had simply disappeared, but that wasn't possible and she feared the worst. He was gone and there was no closure for Morgan, as his only living relatives were his mom and some family living on the west coast, whom Declan hadn't seen in years. Even she and Declan's old friend, Stephen seemed to be losing touch.

She could sit on this beach and watch the water forever; it was a place Declan had cherished, a place she felt close to him. Never again would her life be the same without Declan Blake. How was she going to make it without him?

The world was quiet and without joy for Morgan. Even Morgan's mother nagged her to speak with a therapist. She didn't see the purpose of smiling or laughing when it was all forced. Constant thoughts of Declan plagued her day and night.

Morgan nearly jumped when her cell rang. First instincts were to let the call go to voicemail, but she knew the person calling would only persist. That's how it had been lately; she would ignore phone calls only to find tons of messages waiting.

It was Elle, calling for the second time that day. "Hi, Elle."

"Where have you been? I've been trying to call you for hours," Elle exclaimed.

"I don't know, I'm just hanging out."

"Down by the river again?" Elle inquired.

"Yup," Morgan responded as she moved her foot around in the sand.

"Figured as much."

Elle's voice sounded odd, almost as if she were hearing her close by. Morgan turned to see her friend walking toward her on the grassy path leading to the small beach.

Rising to her feet, Morgan felt tears escape. Elle was by her side, arms wrapped around her within moments. Morgan released Elle and took a small step back.

"Oh, Elle, what am I going to do?" she sobbed.

"You're going to live, dammit. Declan would want you to be happy."

"How? How can I forget about him, just move on?" It wasn't possible, she had tried, and it just wasn't working. Even when she was at work, she was just going through the motions; she did her job, but her heart wasn't the same.

"I think it's time for you to see someone to talk about all of this. You've waited long enough."

She was right and so was her mother, believe it or not. "I will, Elle. I will because I don't know what else to do."

"Morgan, you're the strongest person I know. You have so much happiness and love to share. I have full confidence in you. You're going to make it and come out stronger in the end." Elle spoke through her own tears.

"Thanks, Elle. I love you." Morgan felt better knowing there was someone on her side rooting for her.

# CHAPTER NINE

Three Years Later

The turbulent night sky seemed to call to her, beckon her back to another time. The bleak cold and darkness was taunting her to succumb to her worst nightmare. As always, the variation of the recurring dream came crashing back, an unwelcome intruder, shoving her face hard into the past. The facts were never quite accurate, timelines confused and hazy, but the dreams were tangible and vivid.

Morgan gasped for air. His face came first, that boyish, unforgettable handsome face. The country had mourned together after September 11th; fallen heroes were in everyone's hearts. It was unfathomable to think that years later, America was still fighting terrorists who threatened the American way of life.

Damn him, he should have stayed right by her side. But, of course, it was just like Declan to fight for what was right. He would have given the shirt off his back for anyone who needed it.

He was telling her that he loved her, that once he got back from Afghanistan, they would be together forever. Declan got down on one knee and looked up at her with love and affection.

" _Will you marry me?" He pulled a tiny, black velvet box out of his shirt pocket. The princess cut diamond was brilliant, catching the light of the fire crackling in the cozy fireplace. She fell in love with him all over again at that exact moment. Raw emotions overtook her mind as she squealed, jumping into his arms._

" _Yes, a million times, yes! I will marry you, Declan!"_

" _Get over here." He leaned in closer and placed his lips on hers softly, gently at first. She was eager to return the kiss; the intensity was heating up, a fire fueling inside her._

Suddenly the room burst into flames as a loud, crashing boom took him out of her arms, a burst of air throwing her across the room. Silent screams came from her mouth, filling her over and over again until she thought her head would explode. There was now nothing but the crumbled ruins of the restaurant around her, the smell of smoke thick in the air. Declan was nowhere in sight, and she was left alone, silently screaming.

Morgan woke with a start, sitting up suddenly, a stream of sweat pouring down her chest, tears stinging her eyes. Her breaths were ragged, coming quickly. She inhaled deeply and felt her heart slamming into her chest. She practiced deep, controlled breathing just as her therapist had taught her, until the hammering in her chest slowed down. Another dream, or should she say nightmare? It had been years and the thoughts still haunted her every single day.

"Morgan. What is it?" Mike leaned over, placing an arm across Morgan's lap. She looked at him and shook her head to clear her thoughts.

"It's nothing, just a dream." Her breathing had settled now, she could compose herself a bit. Lowering herself down to her pillow, she rubbed her hand up and down Mike's arm. He looked at her, his eyes squinting, suspicious.

"Is it the one about Declan again?" He spoke quietly.

"No, no, nothing like that. I just..."

Mike had seen Morgan through one too many of these nightmares, and she knew his patience was wearing thin. Mike felt Declan was like a ghost hovering over their relationship, out of sight, but just close enough to cause harm. Morgan sensed that Mike could read her most intimate thoughts, that maybe she wasn't over the memory of Declan; perhaps she would never be able to let go. If only he knew.

Mike exhaled deeply as he placed a kiss on Morgan's wrist and cuddled against her. "Go back to sleep."

"Sorry for waking you."

Mike molded himself against Morgan's back, spooning her. But her mind wasn't anywhere close to shutting down. She waited until Mike's breathing slowed down, waited for that gentle snore, until she was sure he was sleeping. Quietly, Morgan crept her way out of the bed that she shared with Mike and headed for the basement. Why did she feel so guilty whenever she did this? And why did she find herself doing this more often lately?

With the stealth of a feline, she made her way down the stairs, toward her desk in the corner of the dark basement, and opened the bottom left side drawer. Stealing a glance behind her, she was relieved to find that she was still alone.

Flicking on the tiny desktop lamp, Morgan dared to release a breath. In the very back of the metal drawer, almost out of reach, was the small, black box. After opening it cautiously, Morgan fingered the shining engagement ring. The ring was still so sparkly and beautiful after all these years, still so vibrant, full of life. It still maintained the power to bring tears to her eyes. As a lone tear slid down Morgan's face, she snapped the box shut, staring silently ahead, lost in deep thought.

Hearing the sound of a shuffle across the room, Morgan caught her breath and spun on her heels. There was nobody there; it was just her imagination spooking her, playing tricks on her in the cold, lonely night.

"Charlie! It's Anna's turn. Let her have the swing now."

Shaking her head, the wind blew stronger as Morgan moved her long, dark hair out of her eyes. Turning to Elle, she pulled her scarf closer to her neck.

"We should probably head inside in a few minutes, the wind is kicking up."

"I guess you're right, although I hate the fact that we've all been trapped inside for the last couple of months." Elle spotted Charlie who was acting up again, grabbing Anna, trying to pull her from the swing. Morgan stepped forward as Elle ran ahead.

"I got this." Elle raced to the swings.

The chill in the air nipped at Morgan's cheeks as she called the students inside. Although Morgan loved where she lived, this winter had been particularly challenging with its frigid temperatures and endless snowstorms. The kids in Morgan's class weren't the only ones starting to get cabin fever.

After hustling the little ones indoors, Morgan slammed the door to her classroom shut, blocking out the wind and cold. One look at her students' rosy cheeks and she knew that she had made the right decision despite the protests that could be heard over the sound of her own voice.

"Now, now. It's too cold. Let's hang up our jackets and then I'll see who's ready for snack time." That seemed to ease the atmosphere in the room.

Pulling off her gloves and shaking off her heavy coat, Morgan began calling the students by tables to get their snacks.

"I like the way that the children at table two are waiting quietly. You may get your snacks."

As soon as all the children had been called to get their snacks, Morgan and Elle settled themselves at a table close to the kids and reached for their own snacks. Today, Morgan had packed a Greek yogurt for herself.

"You're a natural with kids, you know. When are you and Mike going to bite the bullet and have some little ones of your own?"

Looking down at the floor, Morgan swallowed her spoonful of yogurt. "Come on, give me a break. Mike and I aren't even married," she whispered.

"Yes, but he's been dropping hints, right? And no offense, but you're not getting any younger," Elle teased her friend.

"Oh, please! Like twenty-nine years old is ancient! Just because you got married when you were twenty-five doesn't mean that I'm missing the boat."

"Yes, but be careful. Mike's a great guy. He's a good provider and not bad on the eyes, either." Elle wiggled her eyebrows.

Swatting at her friend, all Morgan could do was sigh. Elle knew her just about as well as anyone could; they had been working together for years now. It was true, Mike was a great guy, and he was also a good provider. His job at the mortgage company provided Mike with a steady income. It held the promise of growth in the future years as well. With her income combined with his, they could live comfortably.

Mike had indeed been hinting at marriage. At this point Morgan had tried to gracefully change the subject, but she had a feeling the day was coming soon. What was she waiting for? She had convinced herself that she would never find a love like the one she had with Declan; that kind of love came around only once in a lifetime. Shouldn't she reconcile the fact that she had a decent partner in Mike?

"Miss Elle, can you open my cookies?" Little Robbie came bounding over, bag of cookies in hand. Elle reached over and grabbed the bag.

"There you go. Those cookies look yummy," Elle stated playfully before turning her attention back to Morgan.

"Earth to Morgan!" Elle giggled as Morgan snapped out of her thoughts.

"Elle, do you believe that true love comes along only once in a lifetime?"

Her friend scrunched her brows, crinkling her dark green eyes, as if choosing her words very carefully. After a moment she spoke. "I believe... I believe that people can fall in love again, and that life goes on."

Leave it to Elle to speak so diplomatically. Maybe she did have a point though; Morgan couldn't pine away forever for a man that was no longer around, could she? She had her cherished memories of her brief time with Declan and nobody could take that away. But then why did she feel as if she were being unfaithful to him?

With a sigh, Morgan fiddled with her sleeve. Knowing that she was still young and that marriage and family were always a dream for her future, she knew that she had some long, hard thinking ahead of her.

The little ones were growing restless, with their food almost gone. Morgan mentally reviewed the next activity for the morning. She would let the kids visit the various learning centers that were set up around the room, they would rotate, and then it would be time to pack up to go home. With the afternoon group of students arriving soon, Morgan figured she had enough distractions for the time being to keep her mind off her brewing dilemma with Mike.

"Stop that!" Morgan swatted Mike playfully, a giggle escaping her mouth. He reached for her and tickled her again, whispering playfully in her ear.

"I'm not giving up!" Laughter boomed as Mike tickled her knee, knowing that this was the most ticklish spot on Morgan's body.

"Give up?" He held her tighter, laughing into Morgan's ear.

"Yes! Yes! I give up!" she managed through fits of laughter.

"Good, now kiss me." He grabbed Morgan under the blanket, his eyes filled with mischief. She obliged, giggling softly through the kiss, happy and content. After a moment, Morgan fixed her eyes on the large television screen.

Morgan lay in Mike's arms as he took the remote to rewind the movie to the spot they had watched before he had stopped to make some microwave popcorn. Morgan definitely enjoyed their life together. Mike was kind, caring, handsome, and funny. They were a good match.

They had met two years earlier, during a time that her life was dark and bleak. Mike made her laugh, took the black cloud that was over her head and moved it away, well, for most of the time, anyway.

She had sworn that she would never date again, not after Declan. But loneliness caught up with her, forcing her to break down the walls, ever so slightly. Sometimes she wondered where she would be now, had she not stopped for coffee that morning.

Morgan was in the habit of stopping for coffee most mornings before work. This morning was hectic, she was running late, but needed her caffeine fix in the worst way, so she took a chance that the line wouldn't be out the door.

It seemed one thing was going her way; the line wasn't too bad. In line ahead of her, a few feet away, a handsome man turned around. He was tall, with deep, soft brown eyes. He stole a glance at her, smiling.

She smiled shyly, looking away. The last thing Morgan wanted or needed at this point was another relationship. She waited quietly for her turn to order, silently willing the barista to get a move on. The man turned around again, still smiling.

When it was Morgan's turn to order coffee, she was informed that the gentleman ahead of her had paid for her the coffee. She turned to tell the man that wasn't necessary, but he was already out the door

She didn't see him for another week or so, but found herself looking for him, disappointed that he wasn't there. The following week he was there again and this time she graciously accepted the coffee and agreed to go out on a date with him that weekend. She thought that she must be crazy, to start dating again. Her mind told her that it was time. Yes, it had been well over a year, and Declan was not coming home. Ever. It was time to get on with her life.

# CHAPTER TEN

"I grabbed some dinner for us, figured I'd surprise you after a long day at work."

Rising to her toes to plant a kiss on Mike's lips, Morgan was pleased that Mike was so thoughtful.

"Chinese! Perfect!" Morgan sighed in contentment. She just knew that Mike had ordered her favorites — Wonton soup, egg rolls, and sweet and sour chicken. Oh, and who could forget the fortune cookies?

Mike fumbled through the cabinet for some paper plates and then placed them on the table. Morgan busied herself by pouring sparkling water into each of their glasses. A comfortable silence ensued as Morgan felt the hot soup warm her from the inside.

"So, I figured that we haven't been anywhere in a while. I got to thinking that we could both use a little time away."

This grabbed Morgan's attention. It had been a while since the couple had taken even an overnight stay.

"My buddy Kevin, at work, has this cabin upstate. He rents it out during the summer. It's empty now, so he said that we could go there for the weekend."

"Oh. What's there to do up there this time of year?"

Mike's cheeks lifted in mischief. "Well, there's skiing, snowboarding, but I know you don't do either of those outdoor sports. So I figured that we could just find some interesting indoor sports to keep us busy."

Morgan swore that she was blushing. Of course that's what he was thinking. Some time away actually sounded great. But, what if? Perhaps Mike would merely suggest moving in together, but truth be told he was practically moved in already with his set of clothes in the spare bedroom and toothbrush in her bathroom. Mike stayed over every night at this point, going to the house he shared with some of his buddies only for a quick stop to grab something.

"Honey, you okay?" Mike munched on his own dinner, glancing at Morgan.

Brushing her worrisome thoughts aside for the moment, Morgan squeezed her boyfriend's hand. "Of course, yes, of course."

"So... what do you think?" Mike peered at her.

"It sounds great, I mean, but can you get time off? You said the office has been really busy and everything."

"I can handle it. It will be good for us. Now what do you say, Morgan? How about this weekend?'

Setting her jaw tightly, she nodded her head up and down. "This weekend. Sure, this weekend sounds great."

Mike leaned over to place a soft kiss on the top of her head. All of Morgan's alarm bells were ringing like crazy in her head. Her gut instinct told her that Mike had something up his sleeve for this weekend. Time to bite the bullet. Elle was right, she couldn't let Declan's ghost prevent her from getting on with her life. She was a big girl and it was time to grow up and move on.

Looking into Mike's warm eyes, she knew that she would be a fool to let him go. It wasn't fair to him to give only half of herself over to him. It was time to make things right. She would do her best to open herself up to this man and let him in. Biting at her lip, Morgan promised herself she would try to let him into her heart, except for that hidden piece that belonged only to Declan.

"I have a feeling about this weekend!" Elle sang out as the women were heading to the parking lot after a long week at work.

"Yeah, yeah." Morgan mustered up a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.

"You know that he would want you to be happy," Elle stated softly.

"I know he would." Morgan couldn't quite meet her friend's eyes. Feeling the threat of tears, she turned her head. Lately, it was becoming harder to rein in her emotions.

"Look at me." Elle took hold of Morgan's shoulders. "Declan was the best, we both know that. But please, Mike is pretty darn close. Give him a chance. Let him in or let him go. Be fair to the poor guy."

Wiping a tear from her eye, Morgan swallowed hard. She would push any thoughts of Declan from her mind this weekend. It was so difficult because the very memories that she held close were the ones that hurt her time and again. She had stayed up half the night struggling with her thoughts.

"I swear, sometimes it's like you're afraid, scared to move on, letting Declan hover over you, keeping you from taking that next step."

Something about the cold, harsh reality of that statement stopped Morgan in her tracks. Tears pooled in her eyes as she glanced away from her friend. Nobody understood, nobody could. Morgan instantly felt as if her closest friends and Mike were trying to take her memories of Declan from her. Ridiculous as it sounded, Morgan was a bit resentful.

Janice, her therapist, was the only one who seemed to have a clue. Anger had spewed as Morgan released tears that had been contained for so long. Shouting at Janice that day that she could never understand was a breaking point; it had taken Morgan months after Declan's death to really face what had happened, to feel anything but numb. Once the tears came, they opened a floodgate of emotion. Janice had spoken firmly, even harshly.

" _You're right about that. Nobody will ever understand what you're going through. These are your thoughts haunting you. Stop trying to forget, force yourself to remember, and then hold him dear. Hold Declan tight in that special spot in your heart, reserved just for him. But then, you need to open that heart of yours down the road and let others in."_

It had been over a year since Morgan had seen Janice, but every once in a while, Morgan would pick up the phone to place a call. She never dialed. Morgan needed to pick up the pieces and move on by herself. Janice had given her all the tools she required; using those tools, however, was up to Morgan.

"I'm sorry, hon. I am, but, I hate to see you like this, half a person, half of the vitality that you used to have." Elle reached out to squeeze Morgan's wrist.

Swallowing back her tears, Morgan nodded forcefully. It made no sense to be upset with Elle. It also made no sense to let a good man get away.

"You're right. I won't let Mike go."

"Good girl. Do yourself a favor. Lighten up and enjoy your weekend."

Reaching over to embrace her friend, Morgan cleared her throat. The scent of Elle's fresh shampoo filled her senses. "I will." An image of Declan's fair skin and dark hair came to mind as she squeezed her eyes shut.

"If you let Mike go, you'd be a fool."

"Well, Elle. This girl's no fool." It sounded convincing, even to herself.

They had gotten a late start, later than Mike had wanted to start their trip upstate. Glancing at the traffic up ahead, Morgan sighed inwardly as Mike smacked his hand against the steering wheel. It wasn't like Mike to be so rushed, so stressed. Usually he was pretty relaxed. Declan, on the other hand, well, he had certainly lacked patience when it came to other drivers on the road. There she went again, comparing the two men. This needed to end.

There was that nagging feeling with Mike at times, he was always so complacent, so agreeable. For a man who had shared stories of a difficult childhood, Mike certainly appeared to have it all together. Sometimes she imagined she could see the small boy who had to deal with a mother who neglected him and paraded numerous boyfriends through the house. It must have been so heartbreaking for Mike to fight for the attention of a woman who rejected him time and again.

It was amazing that Mike had overcome the neglect and become an independent young man. Even now, with his mother estranged, Morgan's instincts were to protect him from the harsh reality that his mother was an evil woman. Heck, her own mother appeared to be a saint compared to Mike's mom.

Morgan supposed that most women would adore a man that fell all over them, agreed with almost everything that they felt. She and Declan had experienced that give and take, that push and pull, quarreling at times, yes, but always passionate. Declan seemed to challenge her, pushing her buttons at times, but oh, the making up had been worth it.

Shaking her head, she couldn't recall the last time she had disagreed with Mike. Oh, but yes, whenever Declan's name came up in conversation, whenever Morgan woke with a start from one of her recurring nightmares, there was always that palpable tension in the air.

Placing her hand gently on Mike's thigh, Morgan stole a glance at Mike, his jaw set firmly and eyes straight ahead on the dark but crowded road.

"You okay?" Morgan spoke softly, in the calm voice she usually reserved for her young students.

"I knew that we should have left earlier." His fingers curled around the steering wheel, pressing down tightly.

"Oh, come on, relax. What's the big deal? We're not in a rush to get there. Just enjoy the ride," Morgan soothed. "Hey, what's this?" Reaching for an envelope that was laying on its backside, she leaned down to grab it.

"Give that to me!" He swerved the car as he reached down for the envelope. A car horn honked loudly as Mike crossed over into the other lane.

What was with him? Turning to look at him, she saw his jaw clenched as he stuck the envelope in his jacket pocket.

"I could have picked that up. You nearly caused an accident!" Morgan cried out. Why wouldn't he have just allowed her to pick up the envelope?

Turning to steal a glance at Morgan, Mike opened his mouth as if to speak, but then quickly closed it and refocused his eyes on the road ahead.

Morgan sighed and spun the dial on the dashboard, turning on the radio. Figuring that he was just in a bad mood, Morgan hoped that it would improve soon. Was Mike really the one for her?

One thing Morgan knew for sure was that too much thinking didn't get her anywhere. Ever since Declan's death, she overanalyzed even the smallest decisions it seemed. _Keep your head in the here and now,_ that should become her new mantra.

Morgan and Mike didn't speak again until the traffic cleared, a good half hour later. Finally, Morgan was the one to break the silence. "I can't wait to have a nice warm shower when we get to the cabin." Time had been tight, so Mike had urged Morgan to take her shower once they reached the cabin.

"No, I don't think we'll have time for that. I made reservations at a restaurant and we'll be lucky if we get there in time." He breathed heavily, exhaling while checking the time on the dashboard.

"Why don't you just call and tell them that we're running a bit late and that way you can relax and I can shower before heading out?"

Pulling up to a red light, Morgan could see beads of sweat trickle from Mike's forehead. "This isn't the type of place that you can just cancel a reservation, Morgan. It took me _weeks_ to get this reservation."

"Weeks? But we only made plans a few days ago..." Morgan began, only to be interrupted.

"Morgan, could you please just stop?" Mike looked her squarely in the eye before darting through the traffic light that had just turned green.

What had gotten into him? "Are you feeling okay? You look sweaty." She reached out a hand to swipe his forehead.

"I... I'm fine. I just wanted this weekend to work out, is all."

"Well... perhaps if you relax a bit it just might." Was this going to be their first real argument?

"You're right... you're right. But no shower, Morgan. We can't cancel. I was exaggerating when I said it took weeks to get it, but this place, you can't change the time. It was the only time they had open, and I really want to go there tonight."

Folding her arms across her chest, Morgan resigned herself to the fact that there would be no shower, which was fine, really, but why was he acting so grumpy? "Fine, it's fine, Mike."

"Good. Now, we're almost at the cabin." Winking at Morgan, Mike rubbed her thigh softly.

She smiled at Mike but something deep down, something she couldn't quite put her finger on, nagged at her.

Sparkling wineglasses had been set before them. They had the coziest table in the room, and there was a sparkle of mischief in the waiter's eye as he uncorked the Chianti. Morgan's pulse sped up, alarm bells clanging inside her head. _This has to be it, this has to be the night, otherwise why would Mike have been so insistent on coming to this very restaurant?_

Frowning ever so slightly, Morgan recalled that Mike hadn't been himself for the last few weeks; he was slightly on edge, anxious even. Until this evening, she hadn't given it much thought, but now she pondered over his recent behavior. Even if he was intending to propose to her, Morgan couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to it. Something was off; she just couldn't name it.

Clearing his throat, Mike glanced at the waiter, causing the man to scurry off, a small smile playing on his lips. Morgan's breathing became labored as she gulped. She had decided that she should say yes, right? That was right; she had even gone as far as to tell Elle that she had made up her mind.

Allowing a quick glimpse back to her past, she saw Declan down on one knee, proposing to her in that tiny wine cellar. He had been shy with her all evening, and then after dinner he lit the fireplace at his place, perfect, cozy, just right...

"Morgan? Morgan... hello?" The dreamy look on her face must have caused Mike to worry. "Are you with me? I was just talking to you and..."

"I know, I know. I was just thinking about work, sorry. It's been a hectic day," Morgan explained, using her hands to dismiss any negative vibe.

"Okay, well I was just saying how beautiful you look tonight. That top brings out the brown in your eyes."

Clearing her throat, Morgan forced herself to the present.

"Thank you. You're not so bad on the eyes, either."

Morgan meant what she said, he was quite attractive and had obviously given extra thought to his attire tonight, choosing a dark blue sweater and black dress slacks. He was also wearing Morgan's favorite cologne. Reaching out for his hand across the table, she gazed deeply into his eyes, searching for that feeling that was somehow just out of reach.

"I... I have to tell you, Morgan, how very happy you have made me." Mike pulled at his collar, taking a deep breath inward.

This. Was. It. Was she being ridiculous? Maybe the man just wanted to have a nice weekend; perhaps he had no intention of proposing. There she was again, overanalyzing everything. Morgan bit her lip, glancing around the crowded room. Not sure if it was her imagination or not, it seemed the hum of chitchat had decreased.

The waiter appeared at the table with a determined look. Approaching Morgan, he stopped and addressed Mike. "Sir, There's a bit of a problem. It seems as if your car is blocking someone in."

_His car? But they had handed over the keys for valet parking_. "I don't understand. Your guys, they parked the car, they would have the keys," she stammered, a bit annoyed.

"Nope. They said they gave the keys back to you, sir." The waiter addressed Mike. "Please come with me."

Morgan stood to accompany Mike so that she could give these guys a piece of her mind. Morgan's jaw dropped as the waiter guided them toward the lobby. Turning to glance at Mike, he shrugged, following the waiter.

The lobby was crowded and couples waited for their tables on cozy chairs. Twinkling white lights sparkled from the ceiling and the windowpanes. A gentleman ran his hands softly across the keys of the grand piano, creating a romantic melody. What was that song he was playing? Morgan recognized it as one of her favorite songs.

"You see, we don't have the keys, I don't know why you insist on..." Morgan was irritated with the man; her waiter just didn't want to listen. Why was he just standing there? With a smirk on his lined face, the waiter turned to leave.

"But, where are you going?" Morgan threw her hands up in disbelief, spinning to face Mike.

"Morgan? Just be quiet, please." It appeared that Mike couldn't contain his grin. Dropping down to one knee, he drew a small box from behind his back. Morgan's eyes opened wide as a small crowd of people started to gather around them.

"Morgan, if I searched far and wide, I couldn't find someone that I love more. Marry me, Morgan, and make me the happiest man in the world."

Clamping her hand to her mouth, Morgan felt her heart thumping, smacking her chest. The crowd around Morgan thickened, wide smiling faces all around. Her knees buckled ever so slightly as Mike pulled her close for a kiss.

"Morgan, will you marry me?"

Staring at him through a flood of emotions, Morgan steadied herself. At this moment, she could see happiness. Mike's smile was contagious, at this very moment she couldn't dream of turning this man down. Yes, she would marry him, and for the first time in a very long while, her mind was only on him.

"I will. I will marry you, Mike."

Cheers and clapping filled the room as Mike pulled her closer and laid his lips upon hers. Morgan lifted her head and through tears, she allowed him to slip the shining ring on her finger.

#  CHAPTER ELEVEN

Rising early as he always did, he guided his hand to reach for his crutches. In the darkness, they weren't always easy to find. Grasping onto the rubber tops, he launched himself forward and made his way to the bathroom. Morning stiffness made it necessary for him to perform his stretching routine upon rising.

His life had become a routine of sorts after the explosion, rising early, checking on his mother, heading to volunteer his time at the veteran's hospital, and then rehab for himself. Once a week, he visited with his therapist, Kathy.

Once upon a time, he believed that therapists didn't help, but now he felt differently. Kathy helped him to put things in perspective, Kathy and Tach.

His life was predictable, it was monotonous, and it was his alone. One of these days he would get that dog he had promised himself. He had decided to rescue a dog from the shelter, save a life. _Soon_ , he told himself, as he was becoming lonelier as the years crawled by. It was hard to believe that he had come so far. He couldn't have done it without Tach — the man had saved his life.

Around the veteran's hospital, they had called him Tach, short for tachometer. It was a clever nickname for Robert Peter Miller. Nobody even knew who had started to call him that; it just seemed natural that with the initials of his name, RPM, the nickname would be appropriate.

Declan had been in a coma for a week or so after the accident. When he woke, he was disoriented and down on his life. He was in such a dark place that he didn't even wish to speak with Morgan.

Upon waking, the doctors had informed him of the numerous skin graft surgeries that would still need to be performed in order to cover his burns that spread across parts of his torso, both arms, and legs. His face was spared somehow, miraculously. He must have covered up when he went down, the doctors had guessed. He was told he may or may not be able to walk on his own again, depending upon how his amputation went. His back was also a concern for the physicians who treated him. How many nerves had been damaged? It was too early to tell.

For the first time in his life, Declan had felt as if he didn't care what happened to him. In his mind, he figured it would be a miracle if he ever came close to being the same man again.

Once the surgeries had been performed and what was left of his leg had healed, he had been fitted for a prosthetic leg, starting just below the knee — the doctors had to amputate his left leg under the knee joint. They said he had been lucky, that if his leg had been cut above the knee, his rehab and outlook wouldn't have been as positive. Lucky? Who would call it lucky to have been involved in an explosion from hidden enemies, and a gun shot at close range?

Hearing loss in his right ear, burns, and damage to his leg and back permanently altered his life. The scattering of burns was the least of his problems. Who would call it lucky that the doctors weren't sure that he would walk again? Was it good fortune that he had watched Sean get blown away, while his friend had been trying to save his life?

There was no luck in any of this, especially whenever he thought of losing the most important thing in his life, his fiancée, his soul mate. More than once, he had stared down those bottles of painkillers and thought, _What if? What if I just said forget it all?_

He had come close, one too many times during those frightening first months back home from the hospital. Internal strength and perseverance must have been by his side, for each time his dark thoughts took over, a stronger presence took hold of him. Fear had gripped him many times in his past, but what worried him most, what scared the heck out of him, was the fear that he would forget her face, her warm smile, the mischief in her sparkling eyes, the sound of her voice. It had been a grueling decision to cut Morgan off, but it was made and that was final. He wouldn't put her through the burden of caring for him, no way.

He recalled the first time he had met Tach. Rehab wasn't going well, his heart just wasn't into it. What was the point? Without Morgan in his life, he was as good as dead anyway. As the passing days accumulated, he grew increasingly depressed. Half the time he didn't even show up for his rehab appointments. It was humiliating, the fact that a nurse had to pick him up, help him into the van.

It had been an hour past the time he was due to show up at the veteran's hospital. They usually called to remind him that he missed an appointment; this time he hadn't heard from them. That was just fine with him. He huddled under the covers, content to go back to sleep. He'd recently taken one of his painkillers, so sleep found him easily.

An incessant pounding entered his consciousness. It had started as a low, distant sound, perhaps part of a faraway dream, but then the noise increased, becoming downright irritating to his senses.

"What the hell?" he shouted, tossing his covers away from his face. He was not getting up. After another minute or so, the pounding stopped. Good, whoever it was had gone away.

Suddenly, he saw his bedroom window opening; a large hand moved the window up then a large head came through. The man was coming inside, inside _his_ bedroom. His first gut reaction was fear; this man was breaking and entering. He was disabled, lying there, unable to defend himself. _Like hell._ Moving quicker than he had in weeks, Declan bit his lip, sat up, and grabbed for his crutches. He yelled for the man to get out and instead of resorting to fear, Declan hurried to meet the man head-on.

"I knew it!" the man bellowed. A wide grin spread across his weathered face. "I knew you had it in you."

The man had mild burns on his face, and judging from his appearance, he looked to be about fifty years of age or so.

The sound of the man's voice stopped Declan in his tracks. "Who the hell are you, and what are you doing in my house?" Declan gasped through ragged breaths. Was this man out of his mind?

"Let's go. I'm taking you to rehab." With a self-satisfied grin, the man walked closer, his hand extended.

There was no way this man was taking him anywhere.

"You have got to be out of your mind," Declan exclaimed.

"Yes, I'm sure that I am. Now let's go."

"What gives you the right?" Declan couldn't believe the nerve of this man. He couldn't stand people who believed they knew what he was going through. Nobody else could even begin to understand his heartache and loss.

"I'm here to help you, man. Don't make my job any more difficult. I will get to you. It's just a matter of time. Why don't you save yourself a lot of time and aggravation and come with me now?"

Declan opened his mouth to yell at the man, but felt tired and worn. "Give me one good reason, one reason why I should bother? It's not worth it to me, not anymore. Man, I've given up. I've given up the fight." What was the point? He was happier just passing the days in his dark place.

The man was rolling up his pants leg, a determined look set on his face. What was he doing? Declan's eyes opened wide at the sight of the man's own prosthetic limb. He had been there; he had been in Declan's shoes. Speechless, Declan just gaped at him.

"Before you go ahead and give me your little speech that I don't understand, save it. I've walked a mile in your shoes, man, more than a mile. Why won't I let this go? Because I've been where you are, through hell and back. I made it back and I won't stop until you make that very same trip."

From that day on, Declan was in the hands of Tach. He was somewhat of a legend around the hospital. He was a tough man with a heart of gold. Tach had been injured during training years ago. By all standards, he should have never walked again; he was lucky to simply be alive. This man's story rang so close to home that Declan was amazed at the shape the man was in, physically and mentally. Now Tach helped to rehab wounded soldiers, playing the role of a tough-loving uncle or brother.

It was a slow, laboring rehab, but once Declan set his mind to it, each day became somewhat of a reward. Every day was a blessing, and Declan figured if Tach could do it then he could do it too. The man became a friend, mentor, and role model to Declan. The only thing that Declan refused to listen to him about was contacting Morgan again.

Tach had a beautiful wife and grown children to love; he said it filled his life with peace and happiness. That was one thing that Declan didn't have and knew for sure wasn't in the cards for him.

Months passed into years as Declan grew stronger. Muscles defined his arms and his cardio was stronger than ever. If Declan couldn't make himself stronger mentally, he was sure as hell going to succeed physically. He had continued to stayed in touch, but now Tach's days were filled with new soldiers, men who needed him desperately.

Solitude was more than just a passing phase; he figured it was slowly creeping up on him, ready to take him down and strangle him if he wasn't careful. But his heart wasn't into searching for new friends to pass the time with. Sean was no longer alive; Declan was still plagued with nightmares of his friend's death. He blamed himself; he knew that a piece of him had also died that day out in the field. His childhood buddy, Stephen, was back home, so far away. Women? There was only one woman who claimed his heart, and destiny had played a cruel trick on their love. Declan couldn't deny that Morgan Matthews would haunt his very being as long as he lived.

Ambling over to his prosthetic limb, he proceeded to begin the process of donning his limb — slipping his sleeve upwards, while shutting his eyes tight, willing Morgan to leave his thoughts and his heart alone.

Why did he expect that the feeling he got deep in his bones would change each day when he visited his mother in this place? The building itself was a dreary gray on the outside, reminding him of a prison, perhaps? Nah, that was probably just in his head, for he knew that his mother was, indeed, a prisoner of sorts, for she would probably never leave.

Sighing loudly, he pulled his collar around his neck and forced a smile on his face as he nodded to one of the nurses passing by. Approaching the front door, he felt that familiar twitch of pain in his leg. The pain came and went and he was left walking with a slight limp. Much better, he supposed, than not being able to walk at all.

"Good morning, Mr. Blake." The young desk attendant beamed from ear to ear each time she greeted Declan at the sign-in desk.

Winking at the pretty blonde, Declan signed his name on the guest sheet for the day. "It's Declan, Sally, please call me Declan."

Sally's cheeks bloomed red as they always did. Chuckling to himself, Declan knew there was a day long ago, long before _she_ came into his life, that he would have entertained the thought of asking Sally out. Those days were long gone.

"Yes, Mr... um... Declan," Sally stammered.

Declan tilted his head as several nurses passed by in the hallway. When he reached the main elevator, he pressed the button for the second floor. The elevator was empty which allowed Declan to be alone with his thoughts.

Each time he visited, he was terrified that it would be the last time. But how was that more terrifying than seeing his mother lying there in that cold hospital bed, unable to remember anything about her past, her own son? There were fleeting moments of lucidity from time to time, but those moments had become few and far between.

The second floor was quiet this morning as Declan made his way to the nurse's station, as he always did before entering room number 212. Wanting to be prepared for the current state that his mother was in, he inquired about her health.

"Good morning, Declan. How are you today?" Betty, his favorite nurse said. Betty was an older woman who reminded him of his mother in her better days, soft-spoken and kind.

"I'm fine. How are you?" He hadn't seen Betty in several days, as her shift changed from time to time.

"Great. Your mom is okay. She's remained in stable condition since yesterday."

"Any moments of clarity? Was she asking for me?" Declan asked the same questions each day and his answer was met with the same response lately.

"I'm afraid not, sweetie." Betty turned her eyes down, shuffling the papers on her desk.

His heart sank as he said goodbye and made his way to room 212. The sound of Betty's voice resonated from behind him and he spun toward the desk.

"What did you say?" Declan walked back toward Betty.

"I said that it was strange, sorry, I almost forgot to mention it," Betty began.

Placing his hands forward on the front desk, Declan urged Betty to continue.

"A young woman came to visit your mom the other day."

His heart leaped in his throat. "What... what did she look like?"

"She was quite beautiful. Long, dark wavy hair..."

"What was her name?" Declan practically sprang at Betty.

"I... I don't recall, but I'm sure the front desk downstairs would have record of it."

"Yes, yes, they would. How long did she stay for? Was she alone?" Declan felt alive for the first time in years.

"She was alone, and I don't know, maybe she stayed for about fifteen minutes? It was sweet, the way she just held your mom's hand." Betty's face softened.

"Mom doesn't like to be touched, not anymore. It agitates her, you know that."

"Well, I can tell you that your mom was wide awake, and that sweet woman seemed to bring peace to your mother."

Could it be her? But how? And would his mom have remembered? Before his mom had suffered dementia to the degree at which she experienced it now, the two women had been quite close.

"Thank you, Betty. I need to see my mom. Please tell me if this woman comes back."

"Of course, Declan. Have a nice visit now."

Declan raced down the hall, stopping short of room 212 then peering inside. His mother was sleeping, her eyes closed with a peaceful look on her face. After opening the door, he slid inside, careful not to wake her. After a few moments of watching her sleep, he decided to give it a try. Reaching ever so slowly, he took hold of his mother's hand and watched her stir. Feeling guilty about waking her, he cringed as her eyes flew open.

"Morgan!" she gasped, eyes flashing.

It had been her; he knew it! Somehow his mom remembered her recent visit; that must be it.

"No, mom. It's me, Declan." He reached forward as his mother opened her mouth in surprise.

"Get away from me! Who are you?" His mother yelled, fear registering on her wrinkle-lined face.

"Mom, sh. It's me, your son." He lowered his voice to attempt at soothing her.

"Help!"

Betty hustled into the room, a crestfallen look upon her face. "Oh, Declan. I'm so sorry." Another nurse arrived within seconds, a shot in hand.

"Declan, you're going to have to give us some time. Your mom, we need to calm her down."

Rising to his feet, he steadied himself and walked to the door without looking back. He couldn't stand it when she got like this; it hurt him to see the woman who raised him, whom he loved from the time he was born, in distress. This time it was his fault, he shouldn't have touched her. He hesitated the briefest moment before turning the knob to leave.

"I don't have a son, I don't have a son... He died years ago." Sobs could be heard behind him as he shut the door.

"Oh my God..." he breathed, barely a whisper.

Although his mother had once known the truth, his lies had become tangled, clouded. His mother couldn't keep it straight in her deteriorating mind. Declan's heart stilled as he realized the damage and heartache he had caused the two people he loved more than anything in this world.

# CHAPTER TWELVE

Now that her thoughts were wrapped up in planning for a wedding, Morgan finally had her head straight for the first time in years. Tying up loose ends had been part of putting the past behind her. The first step had been to visit the place where Morgan honored Declan, the beach by the river. It was where they had taken countless walks; it was where they went that sweltering summer night after the fair. It was where she had first given herself over to Declan, heart and soul. So, yes, it made sense that this would forever be the place to remember Declan. Since Declan's body had never been found, she had nowhere else to go to honor the brave soldier.

He was a brave man, one who had died for a cause that was important to him, fighting for his beloved country.

The second step to putting her demons to rest involved one last visit to the nursing home. Call it closure; call it what you will, but it was something that Morgan needed to do now that she was moving on. Oddly enough, Mrs. Blake appeared to remember her on that last visit, but it was as if they had seen each other the day before, Declan's mother had even reached for her hand and called her by name.

Knowing from the nurses that any tactile connection with the woman upset her, Morgan was hopeful that a miracle had occurred and that this precious woman was on the mend. It wasn't until Morgan brought up Declan by mistake that the agitation began to set in.

" _You need to go to him, stop this silly nonsense. Go after that stubborn boy."_

The words had an eerie chill, Morgan couldn't take it upon herself to tell this mother that her only son was dead; that was something she shouldn't have to remember.

"You're still engaged?" Mrs. Blake had gazed at Morgan's left ring finger, a look of peace settling back to her face once more.

Twisting the ring that Mike had given her weeks earlier, she had wiped a tear from her eye and excused herself, placing a gentle kiss on top of the woman's creased forehead. "Be at peace, Mom."

This woman was like a second mother to her; Morgan's heart broke into tiny pieces. Without another glance, she walked out the door, her head high, fighting back tears.

"You seem to be in a good mood today," Mike stated as he grabbed her from behind.

Leaning back to receive his gentle kiss, Morgan smiled inwardly. She had returned from Florida the day before, a trip that seemed to cause Mike great concern. He had practically begged Morgan not to go, claiming that it would only cause her grief. What Mike didn't know was that it had actually released a sadness in her, provided her with the closure that she so desperately needed. A weight had been lifted; Morgan was lighter than she had been in years and was determined to show Mike just how much she cared for him and appreciated his patience for the last few years.

"Thank you, Mike." Morgan gazed into her fiancé's warm eyes.

Grabbing her close, Mike smoothed her hair from her eyes. "For what, beautiful?"

"Thank you for waiting for me, for putting up with me."

"Honey, I won't let you down. Trust in me, love me with all you have, and I'll make you the happiest woman alive."

That she could look forward to. Morgan's heart opened a bit wider, letting Mike in.

Taratino's had the best Italian food in town. Though a bit pricey, Elle and Billy wanted to treat Morgan and Mike to dinner in celebration of their engagement.

Reservations were made for 7:30 PM, but they arrived slightly ahead of time and were escorted by the hostess to the bar area. After ordering a round of drinks, the couples settled into easy conversation. Bubbling laughter bounced across the room, causing Morgan to glance at a couple near the far window.

Her heart sped up as she recognized Stephen, Declan's friend. It looked as if he was on a date. She could tell by the woman's body language that this could be a first date. Funny, she recalled that Declan wished that his friend would just settle down with the right woman, but Declan swore that no woman he had yet to meet was good enough for his friend — besides her, of course, but she was already taken. Apparently, he was still playing the dating game.

She and Stephen had become close when news of Declan's disappearance had first surfaced, but for reasons unknown, they had drifted apart months after Declan was gone. Having thought it was odd the way Stephen distanced himself, Morgan figured that seeing her reminded Stephen of Declan and therefore brought him unwanted pain. Truth be told, it had hurt Morgan when Stephen broke ties, and it still bothered her to this day. Determined to push Stephen out of her thoughts and enjoy the rest of her evening, she focused her attention back on Mike, whose gaze bounced back and forth between her and where Stephen was seated with his date.

"Who's that?" He didn't miss a beat. This side of Mike was beginning to irritate her. She wasn't a child that needed to explain every thought, for God's sake.

Playing it cool, Morgan bit her lip and shrugged. "Hmm?"

"That guy, the one over near the window. He keeps looking at you."

Morgan locked eyes with Elle, who knew exactly who Stephen was. Elle rose quickly from her seat and tugged on Morgan's sleeve. "Come with me to the bathroom?"

Morgan would have laughed at the notion of running to the girls' room together like middle school teens, however the sight of Stephen dampened her mood. So, she acquiesced and followed her friend to the ladies' room.

Once they were out of earshot, Morgan raced beside Elle, clutching her arm. "Thanks. That was an awkward situation that I didn't need with Mike."

It would start Mike up again with the whole Declan thing if she had to explain how she knew Stephen, and she didn't like to lie, even to escape a confrontation.

"I don't know, Morgan. I mean, shouldn't Mike put his feelings of jealousy regarding Declan to the side? I mean, my God, you shouldn't have to run away from one of Dec's old friends because of Mike's insecurities."

_Dec_. She hadn't heard anyone refer to his nickname in quite some time. It brought forth memories of his face once more.

"Yes, I mean, we're working on it. Mike's getting much better with this whole thing." But Elle was right, why was she making excuses for him?

" _Excuse_ me? He's getting better with this whole thing?" Elle repeated, her eyes wide. " _You_ lost your fiancé, the poor man is dead after fighting for our country, and _you_ are left making excuses for Mike? Don't get me wrong, yes, you need to move on, I get it, I like Mike, but..."

Elle was rambling, her hands flying, when a familiar voice interrupted her ranting. Stepping back, Morgan faced Stephen, who was standing quietly, shifting from foot to foot.

"Excuse me. Nice to see you again, Stephen," Elle squeaked as she pecked him on the cheek and then quickly headed back to the table.

What was this feeling Morgan had coursing through her veins? Why was this man causing such as reaction? She knew the answer; it was because he was part of her past, the past in which Declan had been her world.

"Hi Morgan." His words were soft and spoke volumes. The tenderness of those few words touched Morgan. Instantly, she knew that he regretted their parting of ways. Besides Mrs. Blake, Stephen was the only person in the world that had loved Declan as much as she had. He was her connection to him, and damn, why did he have to pull away?

"Hi. Stephen, it's..." Words stumbled out of her mouth. She should be angry with him, but somehow she couldn't bring herself to feel that way as he was standing before her, looking so familiar. Years washed away in seconds as she yearned for her innocent self.

Stephen guided Morgan to the upstairs dining area reserved for parties. Tonight the room was empty. "Take a seat, please." Stephen's hand shook as he released her elbow.

Morgan felt a trickle of perspiration cascade down her back as she tried to slow her beating heart. After a few moments, Morgan broke the unbearable silence. "Why? Why did you stop calling me? Was it too painful seeing me?" Her voice quivered at first, but then grew stronger. "I needed you."

"It... It was, Morgan. It was too hard."

"Damn you. You and I were in it together. We could have helped each other through it. You just left me all alone." Tears glistened in her eyes as she clenched her hands into small fists.

"Morgan. I need to talk to you about something." He stilled her shaking fists and pried them open. He leaned over, placing a tender kiss on her forehead.

"Morgan." It was Mike, looming over them, a grim line set on his mouth.

"Mike!" Morgan leaped to her feet and smoothed her blouse.

"Sorry to interrupt such a private moment." Sarcasm dripped from his icy words.

"This must be Mike, your fiancé." Stephen's glare was as cold as Mike's words had been.

Thinking it odd that Stephen knew of Mike and their engagement, social media popped into her head. Of course, Stephen must have been keeping track of her life all along. Silently, invisibly, keeping tabs.

Being the perfect gentleman that Morgan remembered, Stephen extended his hand to Mike, who met the gesture with a weak handshake. Morgan cringed inwardly, wanting to avoid any confrontation.

"I was just heading back to the table," Morgan stammered, her attention on Mike.

"Yeah, I can see that." Mike's penetrating gaze unnerved her.

Elle was right though, why should Mike make her feel as if she were wronging him? This was all part of her past. For goodness sake, she had a life before meeting Mike, a happy life. But still... she didn't need an argument here.

"Stephen, it was nice seeing you." Morgan reached for Mike's hand but it didn't go unnoticed that Stephen had wanted to say more. His jaw hung slightly open, his serious eyes bored into hers.

"See you around, Morgan. Mike, it was a pleasure." A look of defeat etched around his eyes.

"Sure, the pleasure's all mine," Mike seethed.

Footsteps echoed off the hardwood floor, finally silencing as Stephen walked from the room and down the stairs. Pulling at Mike's hand, she was then stilled. Morgan clenched her teeth, bracing herself for the impending conversation.

"Sorry to interrupt such an intimate moment," Mike spat.

What was with him? Why did he feel so threatened by a man who was no longer alive?

"Mike, please. Keep your voice down. That was Stephen, Declan's closest friend." Her words were clipped, sharp. Irritation at the way Mike was behaving coursed through her veins.

"Ooh, it just keeps getting better. Declan, Declan, why won't you leave us the hell alone?" Mike raised his voice, peering at the ceiling.

"Are you serious? You should hear yourself! Declan is dead, dead!" Pushing past Mike, warm tears escaped. Mike rushed forward, grabbing her sharply by her tiny wrist.

"And _I'm_ very much _alive_ , dammit! _I'm_ going to be your husband and for just once I'd like to see half the light in your eyes when you look at me as when you speak of him!" Mike's eyes watered, his chin quivering ever so slightly.

Thoughts swirled through Morgan's head. For God's sake, he was right. The light had gone out of her eyes, her smile. She knew it, and yet there was nothing she could do except try to let Mike in. That meant she would have to give herself to him, heart and soul. How did Mike always turn the tables, leaving her feeling guilty about hurting him?

Allowing her gaze to meet his, something inside Morgan broke, softened. Salty tears covered her cheeks as she touched his face. "Mike. It's you now, please, you have to know that."

Seconds passed as the two stared, but didn't speak. After she couldn't stand the silence a moment longer, Morgan reached up and pulled her fiancé down to meet her lips for a soft kiss.

After brushing Morgan's tears to the side, Mike gently reached for her hand and then led her down the stairs, back to the table where Elle and her husband were waiting for them. Part of her felt as if she had compromised her feelings, her beliefs.

Elle's gaze followed Morgan as she approached the table, eyes wide, letting her friend know that she was there for her. Morgan knew that of course, and silently nodded her head. After taking a seat with Mike on one side and Elle on the other, she was comforted with a gentle squeeze of her hand from Elle.

Thoughts of Declan continued to hang over the evening though, and try as she might, Morgan's mood was dampened as she recalled better times, times when Declan laughed with Stephen, with her. It felt like a million years ago, perhaps another lifetime. A place she would go back to in a heartbeat if given the opportunity, a world with Declan and a world that was innocent.

What saddened her more often lately was that with the loss of Declan's life and so many other soldiers, the world had never recovered. Terror was still present, more soldiers went to war all the time, and still so much pain and sorrow afflicted the earth. Her life had changed considerably since the moment Declan went away. She could still see his face, trying to muster a smile just for her, before she pulled away and never saw him again.

# CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Being separated from his childhood home and his friends was one of the things that Declan considered to be a problem with living down south. Needing to be close to his mother, he knew that he had to make the best of it. As an added benefit, he wouldn't run the risk of _her_ seeing him. Or that he would see her, for that matter. Staying in touch with Stephen by phone allowed Declan to gain as much information as he needed in regard to Morgan.

So she was to be married. That was it, he supposed. At first, he had sworn Stephen to secrecy, making him promise not to tell Morgan that he was alive. Stephen had argued over and over again, stating that it was a cruel thing to do, that Morgan would stay with him, marry him, and remain by his side.

_Cruel?_ Declan knew that Stephen was right, in his heart he knew that Morgan _would_ stay with him and put her own life on hold. _Cruel?_ That would be cruel, allowing a young, vibrant woman to give up on her own dreams, to be burdened by a disabled man.

No, it was best if he were presumed dead. Morgan would move on and pick up the pieces. He had witnessed firsthand what a burden it could be to take care of another person when your own life had to be placed on hold. God bless her, but Morgan was too young to stop living because of him.

Doctors had first told him that he may never walk again, may never have feeling below the waist because of his injury. As bad as the injury to his leg had been, the damage to his back was what caused the most concern. It had taken months of therapies and surgeries to bring him to the point where he could feel again, to even begin to think about walking again.

But something had told him that Morgan would be better off without him, a broken man with a dark spot left etched in his heart. Guilt over Sean's death had tormented him, darkened his very being. Visions of broken souls from 9/11 added to his darkness. Morgan was better off without him, that was for sure, or so he thought.

It was time. Declan needed some companionship, and the modest cape style home that his aunt had left in her will to his family was plenty big enough for a dog. With almost an acre of fenced-in property, there was simply no excuse not to get that dog. His financial situation was fine — between his aunt's home and the money he had been receiving from the Army, he worried little about expenses.

Mr. Blake had been a successful contractor for the years leading up to his stroke, and his investments had left Declan and his mother quite comfortable after he had passed away. Declan wasn't the type of man to sit back and have no purpose, and he wanted to make his father proud, believing that the man was looking down upon him. Years ago, his job in the military had given him all the satisfaction he had needed. Today, it was volunteering to help fellow disabled veterans. Still, he got lonely and a dog just might fill the void a bit.

Without thinking about it for another minute, Declan grabbed his keys from the house and ambled over to his gray pick-up truck. Tapping on the steering wheel, Declan drove to the shelter just outside of town. It was after 3:00 on a Saturday afternoon.

Hoping that the shelter was still open, he swung his truck into the car-filled lot, avoiding the handicapped spot as he often did. Only on days when his back or leg ached more than usual would he put the handicapped sign on his rearview mirror. Pride as usual, got in the way more often than not for Declan these days.

The shelter sure appeared to be open. Hustling the best he could, Declan made his way to the front door just as it was opening. A woman with her young child practically slammed into him; she was gazing down at her daughter, who held a small gray kitten clutched tightly in her arms.

"Excuse me." The woman smiled up at Declan as the young girl began to speak.

"Do you want to meet Lilly, my new kitty?" The little blonde-haired girl's eyes lit up as she gazed up at him.

Stooping just a bit so that he was leaning toward the girl, he rested his eyes on the kitten. "Lilly, you say? Well, young lady, that kitten happens to be the luckiest kitten around."

The girl's eyes went wide as she nodded her head up and down. "Why, mister?"

"Why? Because she has you and your mommy here to look after her." Scratching the top of the kitten's head, Declan turned to face the woman with a grin.

His grin was met with a wink. "Thank you." The woman's eyes crinkled with kindness.

"No problem. Enjoy that kitten, huh?"

Declan turned on his heels for a brief moment to watch the girl and her mom get into their car. A feeling deep inside him stirred, one of longing. Morgan would have made a wonderful mother, and he had always wanted to become a father. He supposed it just wasn't in the cards for him, but still hoped that it wasn't too late for Morgan. Who knows, maybe she was well on her way there. Banishing the thoughts that threatened to squash his lightened mood, he focused on his goal, his purpose for being here.

With a shake of his head, he walked through the front door and headed straight for the front counter. A woman was bent down, filing some papers, seemingly unaware of Declan's presence. Waiting a moment, Declan tapped his foot and cleared his throat softly. Turning to face Declan was a young, blonde woman, somewhere in her early twenties. Catching his breath, Declan was unprepared for his gut reaction.

"Hi, how may I help you?" The woman's bright smile reached her striking light blue eyes.

"I... uh, I want a dog." _I want a dog? What kind of thing was that to say?_

He sounded like a total fool. In his years, he had come across many beautiful women, but something about this one, was it the innocence of her smile? Her wholesome girl-next-door looks?

"Well... if you're looking for a dog then I think you've come to the right place." Warmth resonated from the woman's soft chuckle. He could feel his face starting to flush.

"Uh... yeah."

"Sorry, I didn't mean..."

"What is your name?" _Where did that come from?_ A flash of Morgan's face came to mind; he instantly fought it off as he stared at the woman before him.

"Amber. My name's Amber." It was her turn to blush.

"Amber. That's a beautiful name. I... I'm Declan." Clearing his throat, he was surprised at his words. Was he, Declan Blake, actually flirting with a woman?

"Declan? I don't think I've ever heard that name before. What is it, Irish or something?"

A soft chuckle escaped his lips as he went to speak. "Yes, Amber. It is Irish. It's nice to meet you."

Sharp yelps could be heard from behind the door to the right of the office.

"Come this way, Declan, and I'll show you around."

Coming out from behind the desk, Amber appeared in a snug pair of dark jeans. Her build was petite; her stature couldn't be more than five-foot-two-inches. She couldn't have been more different in the looks department than Morgan. Morgan was five-foot-seven with dark hair and eyes.

"Are you going to come with me, or are you just going to stand there, Declan?" Amber chided playfully.

Moving quickly, he stumbled a bit. For the first year or so, Declan had walked with crutches, then a cane. Now, although the doctors urged him to bring the cane along, Declan more often than not opted for heading out without the cane. Maybe it was his pride, but he wanted to try to gain back some semblance of normalcy.

She was by his side in an instant. "Are you okay?" Amber touched his arm.

Embarrassment caused Declan to blush once more. The last thing he needed was this woman feeling sorry for him. Her gaze lingered on the scars on his forearm.

"I'm fine." Pulling his arm back with more force than necessary, Declan straightened himself.

Amber's gaze fell to the floor. The background noise filled the air. The woman stopped to study him.

"What?"

"I guess you didn't hear me, I'm sorry."

No, she was on his right side, with all this noise he must have missed what she said. He was used to missing part of what others said to him these days.

"I'm sorry. What did you say?"

"I said, yes, you do seem fine. Do you mind me asking, though, what happened?"

"What happened? Nothing happened. I just stumbled a bit is all."

He wasn't one to air his dirty laundry. The less this woman found out about his heartache, the better.

"Declan, if you don't mind me saying, I'm a nurse and I can spot a prosthetic leg when I see one." She maintained direct eye contact.

This woman was certainly forthcoming. He waited a moment, gathering up his thoughts. There was something about this woman. More than that, he liked the feeling, that little twinge of a spark that he hadn't felt in so long. But he wasn't ready; he didn't know if he ever would be. And she wasn't Morgan.

"Amber?"

"Yes?"

"How about we look for that dog, huh?" It didn't go unnoticed that Amber's expression changed in that moment. She was suddenly all business.

"What kind of dog are you looking for?" Her eyes were straight ahead, avoiding any contact with his.

Cursing himself for sending out the dismissive vibe, Declan figured it was for the best. He proceeded to tell her that he was looking to rescue a young dog, and he expressed that he wanted a larger breed, a retriever, a boxer, or perhaps a mutt.

"I'm sorry, but the dogs we have right now are all older, mostly brought here because of behavioral problems. But if you check back in a few days, perhaps we'll have a dog that fits your needs."

"Okay, could I leave my name and number? Would you give me a call if something comes in?"

"Sure. Follow me out to the front desk and I'll have you fill out some paperwork." Amber strode ahead, head held high, straight blonde hair teasing the small of her back.

She ran to the desk to answer the ringing telephone, and Declan listened as Amber went about answering the call, gently pushing the paperwork in front of him while motioning for him to take a seat. The sound of her voice soothed him; he could venture to guess that she was a gentle, kind soul. He was pretty good at judging people, and he felt that his first impression of Amber was sure to be correct. When she placed the receiver down at her desk, Amber avoided eye contact.

Declan rose to his feet and shuffled over to the desk. Amber's smile didn't quite reach her eyes as she took the papers from his hand then spoke about calling him if they got some more dogs in. His eyes followed her mouth and he couldn't resist. Placing a hand on her wrist, he stilled her.

"Amber. I'm sorry if I was rude back there, it's just..."

"Rude? No, I was the one who was rude. My big mouth always gets me into trouble. I push too far." Still, her gaze was averted.

"No, you weren't rude. It's me. I don't like to talk about it. I'm a private person is all."

An elderly man appeared then from the back room and began locking up the main door.

"Declan, it was nice to meet you. We're getting ready to close up here. Enjoy the rest of your weekend."

"Yeah, you too. Again, I'm sorry, Amber." She stood, feet from him, nodding her head, a firm line set on her mouth.

Glancing back once more, he then turned and walked out the door.

# CHAPTER FOURTEEN

The nagging feeling that Stephen had been trying to tell her something followed Morgan for days. Mike hadn't brought up the night at the restaurant and Morgan couldn't be more pleased about it. Things were back to normal, so to speak.

Elle had been less than happy when Morgan shared how things had gone when Mike had met Stephen. Even knowing that Elle had a point, Morgan stood her ground and defended her man. Mike wanted the focus to be on _their_ relationship now, and she could understand how feelings of jealousy could make Mike behave the way he did at times. Dismissing her thoughts of Stephen, Morgan headed out the door to work.

Just as she was pulling into the parking lot at the school, Morgan's phone beeped. She quickly glanced down at her cell then waited until she was in her spot and had turned the ignition off.

Love you M- will miss you today.

Her smile couldn't be contained.

Love you too, Mike. Have a good day.

"Oh no!" Glancing at the time on her cell, Morgan cursed.

Rushing out the door, Morgan recalled that she had scheduled a parent meeting for Thomas, one of her students. Thomas was new to her class, having moved into the district from another town. The boy had an IEP; he was a special needs student placed in her class. Thomas was doing okay academically, but some of his behaviors concerned Morgan. He was becoming increasingly agitated and physical with the other students. His mother had chosen the inclusion class to provide positive role models for her son.

Morgan couldn't believe that she had forgotten this meeting; it wasn't like her to be forgetful, especially when it came to her students. She had a feeling that Thomas was suffering from problems as a result of his parents' recent divorce and it was essential that she discuss her feelings with his mom.

_Time to get your head in the game,_ she scolded herself as she spied Thomas's mom approaching the front door of the school. Plastering a smile on her face, she quickened her pace to meet up with her.

"That's not like you, Morgan." Mike smoothed her hair with his fingers, attempting to soothe Morgan after she had told him of the forgotten meeting.

It had been a hell of a day, starting with the forgotten meeting, leading right up to forgetting her umbrella and rushing out to her car after work in the torrential downpour.

"And I swear, it was a deluge!" Morgan threw her hands up in the air, exasperated. Biting down on her lip, she tried to fight off a stress headache. "Give me some aspirin, please."

Mike placed two aspirin in her hand then turned to rub the small of her back. "Relax, Morgan, so you had a bad day. It happens. Was anything else on your mind? I mean, to put you in this mood?"

"Like what?" she snapped. He wasn't going there again, was he?

"Calm down. I'm just asking. My God, ever since you ran into that guy the other night, you're on edge. What gives?"

Clenching her fists, Morgan's pulse quickened.

"Are you serious? I mean, really, now? This is starting to piss me off."

"Piss _you_ off? Piss _you_ off?" Mike repeated, his voice raising.

Was he for real? Her head pounded, and she finally found her voice. "Do you want to go there? Tonight? I told you I had a bad day, so what do you do, dredge this stuff up again?" She was shouting at him, moving closer.

"I thought we had decided that you were going to put him to rest, Morgan."

" _We_ decided? _We? I_ am the one who has to deal with mourning for my fiancé in silence, afraid to upset _you..."_ Tears poured down her face, she let it all out.

"Whoa... What did you just say? _I'm_ your fiancé, dammit! And I'm so sick and tired of taking the back seat to that man. Get over it. He's dead, dead as a fricking doornail! He's not coming back!"

The finality of his words, the bluntness struck her. She zeroed in on Mike in a flash, pounding his chest over and over.

"Stop saying that! Stop it!" she wailed, covering her ears like a small child, until Mike threw his arms up in disgust.

Once her shouting had ceased, the two stood, no words between them. She needed time to think, away from Mike. He'd pushed her too far and it couldn't keep happening. "I think you should go home."

"Home? Morgan, I thought this was my home." Mike's eyes watered.

Morgan turned her back on him. "It's my house. Please leave."

The words rang harsh, even to her own ears. She didn't lift her head up until she heard his footsteps retreat down the hallway to the bedroom, back down the hallway and finally, with a slam, out the front door.

Slipping to the floor, Morgan wept into her hands, her chest heaving. What she needed was time alone, time away from Mike, and time to herself. Fingering her engagement ring, she stood, softly making her way down to the basement, to the drawer, to the box, to the ring. Gently, she removed Mike's ring and set it to the side. Picking up Declan's ring, she slowly slipped it onto her left ring finger. _One last time._

Amber's face clouded his thoughts. He should go back there, check to see if any new dogs had come in. But she had said that she would call him. Denying the fact that Amber was an attractive woman was absurd. He wasn't ready to date, but something about her pulled at him; it was difficult for him to pinpoint his exact feelings. He hadn't felt so comfortable talking to anyone like that in a very long time.

Tapping his fingers loudly on the kitchen table, he bit down on his lip. _The hell with this_ , he thought. Checking his watch, he saw that if he rushed, he could still make it to the shelter before closing. Morgan had moved on with her life and maybe it was high time he did the same. He was determined to stay positive as he made the ride over to the shelter.

_Would she be here?_ He certainly hoped so. His heart hammered in his chest as he opened the front door. It was quieter now compared to the last time he was here. Deflation hit him as he saw a middle-aged brunette woman behind the desk.

"Hi there, what can I do for you today?"

Shuffling his feet, he attempted to mask his disappointment. "Um, I was looking to see if you guys have gotten any new dogs in. I was here last week and I spoke with Amber."

The woman shook her head slowly. "No, I don't think we've gotten any new guys in since then. What type of dog are you looking to adopt?"

The woman was filing paperwork as she spoke, eyes on her task. Declan informed her of his wishes for adoption.

"Nope. Sorry to tell you, but we haven't had any pups that fit the bill for your requirements in quite some time, but if you fill out some paperwork..."

"No, I've already completed the paperwork. I just figured I'd stop by. I was in the area."

The woman's eyes were still glued to her filing. She turned her back then stooped to grab a piece of paper from one of the files.

"Is Amber here today?"

That seemed to grab the woman's attention. Stopping mid-task, she slowly placed her spectacles on and gazed at Declan. "No, no she's not. I can help you with any questions you may have, though."

Gulping loudly, Declan stepped back. "No, I mean, it's... Just forget it." Didn't Amber mention that she was a nurse? Maybe she only worked weekends.

The woman's face softened. "Ah, I see. I see."

"No, I mean, it's nothing like that." Heat crawled up Declan's neck, reaching his cheeks.

"Oh, okay. In that case, is there anything else I can help you with? Should I tell her you stopped by? What is your name by the way?" A smug grin mocked him, ever so gently.

"No, that'll be it. Have a nice day, ma'am." As he turned to leave, he paused briefly. "It's Declan. Tell her it's Declan."

A broad smile lit up the woman's face as she winked. "Nice to meet you, Declan. Will do. I'm Cathy by the way."

Days later, his cell rang. Glancing at the caller ID, he frowned as he didn't recognize the number. Usually he just hit IGNORE if he didn't know who was calling, but this time he decided to pick up the call.

"Hi, is this Declan Blake?" The voice sounded familiar.

"Yes, it is."

"Hey, Declan, it's Amber, from the animal shelter."

That was where he had heard the voice before. Of course. "Hi Amber."

"Hey." The pause was tangible. "So, we got this dog in today. She's a boxer, about a year old, very affectionate and playful..."

It sounded perfect. He was already grabbing his keys, walking faster and with more purpose than he had since Afghanistan.

He grinned as he ended his call with Amber and headed out the door. The ride over to the shelter seemed to take forever. He raced up to a spot right by the door then slammed his truck into PARK. Taking one last glance in his rear view mirror, he swallowed loudly.

She was there, of course, looking adorable in her tight blue jeans.

"Declan!" A wide smile spread over her face as she spotted him.

"Hi, Amber." He paused and took her in.

"Come on, let's go meet her." Amber appeared nearly as excited as he did about the prospect of this dog. It was very cute.

Declan's eyes zeroed in on every kennel they passed. Yelping filled the air as he and Amber made their way to the middle of the facility. Amber turned on her heels and took hold of his sleeve. It felt funny to have someone touching him after all this time. The sweetest smile he had seen in years met him as Amber opened her arms and gestured toward the dog.

Droopy, sad eyes met his. She had a fawn coat with a speck of white, just like a deer. This girl was on the small side, hard to believe that she was about eighteen months old.

"She's not a puppy? She looks so tiny." She looked perfect.

"She was the runt of the litter. An elderly couple brought her in, very nice people, but they didn't have a big yard and they said that this girl here is high energy. I don't know, I'm thinking that if she had plenty of exercise that she might not be so wild. What do you think?"

"Let's take her out. Is there someplace I can play with her?"

"Absolutely. Her name's Delilah."

Amber must have noticed the look on his face as he heard the name. Scrunching up his face, he shook his head. "Delilah?"

Amber's soft chuckle filled the air. "Yes, Delilah. But the good news is that she goes by D. Or you could just rename her."

D. He could handle that nickname. "D it is. I wouldn't want to confuse the poor girl." Amber gently unlocked the cage as D hesitated.

"Now, just so you know, D here is a bit skittish, probably just nerves about being in a new place."

She may have been skittish, but she walked right up to Declan and pressed her tiny body against his.

"Oh my, it seems she likes you. I mean, seriously, she hasn't warmed up to anybody like this." Amber scrunched her brows.

Declan allowed D to lean against him, feeling the dog's tiny heartbeat fluttering as he stooped slightly to pull her close. He knew in that instant that he would adopt her, to start his own little family. "I'll take her."

"I knew you would. But please, take a moment to play with her out back just to be sure." Amber giggled at the sight of D and Declan, huddled close.

After snapping a leash onto her collar, Amber guided D outside, Declan following closely.

"Here you go. Enjoy. I'll be inside if you need me."

He wished that Amber would stay, be a part of this special moment. It was becoming clear that he could use a friend here in Florida.

As if reading his mind, she shook her head. "You two need to bond. I'll be inside when you're ready." Amber turned to head back.

"Amber?" Declan called for her.

"Yes?" Sunlight streaming from the window hit her shiny blonde hair.

"Thank you." He meant it. Today would be a bright day that he would always remember.

"You bet." And she continued on to the office area.

Extra time with D only cemented the fact that this dog was already his. Grabbing her leash, he whistled for her and she ran straight for him.

"Whoa girl, take it easy." After running around the perimeter of the fence, she slammed into him and leaned in for a sloppy kiss.

Amber had the paperwork ready to be signed. Explaining that all of her shots were up to date, Amber handed him a folder with the essential paperwork.

"That's it. Enjoy her." But their gaze held as Declan struggled for something to say, to prolong his stay.

Declan moved closer, taking his hand and placing on top of her small one. "Remember when I told you that I didn't want to talk about it?" He was referring to her questions about his leg.

Nodding once more, Amber maintained eye contact. He gripped her hand tighter. "Would you like to grab a cup of coffee when you get off later? I'm kind of in the mood to talk."

Suddenly shy, Amber simply nodded once more.

"What time do you get off?" He was feeling confident now, perhaps ready to let a new friend into his life.

"Four o'clock."

"I'll be here to pick you up." With a wink, he clutched D's leash and headed for his truck.

# CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Mike stayed away for two whole days. She was relieved on one hand, but grew more anxious as time passed. This wasn't like him, not at all. With all their recent arguments over Declan and her past, she realized this one thing. She didn't want to lose Mike — that much she knew after their time apart.

Although he would never admit it, Mike's mother had done a number on him. Morgan tried to keep in mind all of the rejections he had suffered as a child. Even some of the men whom Mike had referred to as stepfathers had all abandoned him. It was clear to Morgan that he felt threatened by Declan's memory and was afraid to lose her.

It would be up to her to make the first move, to call him. Mike hadn't answered, so she had sent a text asking how he was and that she needed to speak with him. No response, but about an hour later, he appeared at her door, knocking, as if he were a total stranger.

"Come in." Brushing a stray hair aside, Morgan could see that he had deep shadows etched beneath his eyes, similar to her own.

Silently, he followed Morgan up the stairs and into the large kitchen. Morgan busied herself putting on a pot of coffee as Mike settled in at the table.

"Coffee?"

"Nope." His response was quick and sharp.

"Well, okay. If you don't mind, I'm going to have a cup."

"Morgan, sit. What is it that you want? Why did you ask me here?" Brown eyes bored into her hers. His stiff posture told her that he was still quite upset.

"Mike, I'm sorry. I've been doing some thinking..." she started.

Rising from his seat at the table, Mike paced the room, hands flying. "I can't do this anymore, I can't compete with the ghost of a perfect man, Morgan."

"But... nobody ever said that he was perfect. I never..."

"Didn't you, though? Morgan you never had to actually say the words, but I know that's how you view him. I can't compete, I never could."

Oh my God, she was going to lose him. "No, Mike, no. I love you. I told you that. We're going to be married!"

"I don't think so, Morgan. I don't think I can do this anymore. I'm sorry."

Was he serious? How could he feel this way? Morgan felt dizzy as she approached him. Reaching out for him, she drew closer. Mike grabbed her hands and stilled her.

"I have seen you. Time after time, I've seen you go down there."

Confusion set in, creasing her brows. Morgan had no idea what he was talking about. "I don't understand."

"I've watched you, countless nights, go down to that damned drawer, slip his ring on your finger. Damn, Morgan, what do you think that does to a man's heart?"

Frozen to the spot, Morgan was rendered speechless. He was there, watching silently in the shadows. More than once, she had felt the presence of somebody lurking, watching...

"But how could you? How could you just stand there, watching me?" Words stumbled from her lips, nothing but a mere whisper. Eyes wide, she turned to face Mike.

"Make a choice, Morgan, and make it now. Forget about him and marry me. Now or never. And I don't want to hear his name from your lips ever again."

"I... we're engaged, aren't we? I said I would marry you."

"So you said. But we never set a date. You never wanted to talk about planning for the wedding. It's like you're holding our plans just out of reach, dangling, but never following through."

It was true, what he was saying was all true. What was she waiting for? Extra time to tell her that marrying this man was the right thing to do? She had resigned herself to the fact that true love was once in a lifetime, and Declan had been the one. Love with Mike was different; she did love him, as much as she possibly could at this point.

"What do you want me to say?"

"Say that you'll marry me."

Running her hands through her thick hair, Morgan still didn't understand. "I said I would..."

"No, Morgan. Marry me now. I'll call the justice of the peace, we'll see when he has the first available time."

But this was crazy, she had wanted a real wedding, with the church, the dress, the banquet hall, bridesmaids.

"Mike, please."

"I thought so." Throwing up his hands, he ran for the stairs, taking them two at a time. She couldn't let him leave; she had to make him turn around.

"I'll marry you. Now." The words escaped before she had a chance to really think it through. The one thing she knew was that she was lonely without him. God help her, she hoped she was doing the right thing.

After bringing D home and showing her around his house, he ran to the store and got the essentials — dog food, water bowl, crate, a few chew toys, and a soft dog bed. Once he was sure that D was settled, fed, and walked, he placed her in her crate and headed back out to the shelter.

He was there at four o'clock on the dot. Amber was waiting for him with a small smile as he opened the door. _So very different from Morgan, worlds apart._ This girl was innocence and freshness where Morgan was sexy and gorgeous in a way that he could never forget.

When would he stop comparing every woman he saw with Morgan? Time was making Morgan's memory less painful. His heart would always be connected to hers, and he was truly happy to hear that she would be married, moving on with her own life. Although part of him was undeniably jealous, Morgan was _his_ girl. But he supposed that wasn't true anymore, not after he had given her up.

Taking a deep breath, he reached for Amber's elbow and guided her toward his truck. Initial small talk turned into a comfortable silence as he pulled into the parking lot of a local diner.

After telling Amber to stay in the truck, he moved as quickly as he could to open the door for her.

"Thank you, Declan." He was rewarded with a sweet smile.

There was a moment that had passed between them, standing there in the parking lot. Drizzle began to fall from the sky as Amber gazed up at him. Part of him wished he could just kiss her, right then and there. The other part still saw Morgan.

Making their way to the front door, he felt as if he had found an old friend. They ordered coffee and sat and talked for hours. Hours felt like minutes as Declan opened up to her in a way that he hadn't thought possible, not until now. He shared about his injuries; he shared about Sean, even. Amber had remained silent, taking it all in until she reached over to touch his arm where his burns were evident.

"Oh my God, you are a brave man."

Not what he had expected to hear. She didn't make him feel sorry for himself, instead she brought him up, made him feel stronger somehow.

"Can I ask, was there someone? Were you married before?"

That was one thing he didn't bring up, didn't want to discuss. But he was in the mood to talk and before him was the most beautiful girl, kind and caring.

The words spilled out. "Yes, yes there was." Gazing down, Declan pulled at his placemat, sucking in a deep breath before continuing.

"It's okay, you don't have to..."

"No, Amber. It's fine. I want to."

He told her of Morgan, how they were engaged to be married, how they had met even. Recalling Morgan's face for the first time, all those years ago, when he was at her school for career day brought him back in time.

"Wow. She sounds wonderful." Amber gazed off to a point in the distance, fumbling with her collar.

"She was. She is, I mean."

Realizing how that sounded, he noticed Amber's mouth draw down. Was he giving this woman the wrong idea? Attraction was evident between the two, but Declan only saw Morgan, still, after all these years. Now that he was face to face with this sweet girl, perhaps this wasn't the best idea. His intention had never been to hurt her.

He placed his hands over hers. What could he say to help her understand?

"No, it's over, I mean sort of."

"Sort of? Did she leave you?" Amber was full of questions.

"It just didn't work out. It's been years since I've seen her."

"Oh." Clearly perplexed, Amber gazed at her placemat.

"To say it's complicated would be an understatement, to say the least. I want to be upfront, honest with you, Amber. I like you, but I'm not ready to date anyone. Does that make sense?"

Nodding her head, Amber cleared her throat and fingered her coffee mug. Even though he had tried not to, he could see that he had hurt this woman. What was wrong with him? Of course she would get the wrong idea, with him asking her out for coffee.

"Listen. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, me asking you here..." He started, only to be interrupted with a quick swipe of Amber's hand.

"No, it's okay. Look, for whatever it's worth, I like you too. Let's just hang out, enjoy one another's company, no pressure, right?"

Nodding his head, Declan couldn't agree more. "Can we move on now?"

"Sure, sure."

But there were still questions hanging in the air, he could see it in her eyes.

"But, Declan, did she leave because of..." Hurt touched Amber's face.

Shaking his head to signal a firm no, he ran his hands through the air. As much as he wanted to spill everything to this woman, his parting with Morgan was one topic that he needed to keep close to his own heart.

# CHAPTER SIXTEEN

"Do you, Morgan Matthews, take this man..."

The nuptials resonated in her head as Mike gazed down at her, his eyes filled with happiness. Or was it triumph?

" _You may kiss the bride!_

The clerk threw his hands up in the air as Mike pulled her in for a long, hard kiss. Morgan was now Mrs. Thompson. Morgan Thompson. That sounded okay to her. Smiling up at Mike, she gazed into his soft eyes.

" _I love you, Mrs. Thompson. You're finally mine. All mine."_

Why did the words sound menacing? Brushing the thoughts to the side, Morgan smiled wide and sighed.

" _Love you, too."_

Glancing across the room, she could see Elle and Billy. Elle peered over at her friend, locking eyes. Elle glared at Mike and ran from the room. Wait...

"Morgan, what is it?" Mike woke her out of her dream. She needed time to clear her head.

"Just give me a moment, honey."

Leaning over to get out of bed, she caught her breath. Was this a sign? The dream concerned her. Nagging doubt about Mike's ultimatum consumed her thoughts, apparently even in her sleep. Surely, Mike must think this was another Declan dream, but this time he was the focus of her dream.

"What is it? Is it..."

"For God's sake, no! It's not!" Morgan snapped. Her bottom touched the bed again and she ran a hand through her tangled hair.

"Calm down. I didn't say anything." His denial was ridiculous.

"But you were going to, weren't you?"

Her patience was wearing thin. What had she agreed to? After sharing her plans yesterday with Elle, she was seriously questioning Mike's motives. Essentially he was bullying her into marrying him in a way that she wasn't happy or comfortable with. Little girl visions of the perfect wedding day, complete with the most gorgeous dress flitted through her thoughts.

Elle was appalled that Mike would want to force this kind of quick wedding, against her wishes. Once a big fan of Mike's, Morgan could feel Elle's opinion changing. But how much of this was Morgan's fault? Had she forced this to happen, played a part in turning Mike into a jealous, demanding man?

"I... I'm sorry. I just thought that..."

Standing once more, Morgan started to head to the bathroom. "Forget it."

Mike pulled at her wrist, guiding her back to bed.

"What's the matter, Morgan? You went to bed with a chip on your shoulder and now this."

"Mike." Gathering up her courage, she knew that it was important to speak her mind. If she didn't speak her mind now, she would just be setting up a lifetime of cowering to his needs without a say on her part. "I... I don't want to marry you like this."

Mike shot straight up in bed. "What do you mean?"

"I still want to marry you, but like the way we had planned. I want to take our time, plan a proper wedding, even a tropical honeymoon. It's my dream."

Mike took a moment to ponder over what she had just announced. He seemed to choose his words carefully.

"I can't take any more of Declan."

Declan again. Mike seemed to bring up his name a lot more than she did lately.

"You're my fiancé, Mike, _you_. Just stop it or you're going to destroy everything that we have. I know you don't want to lose me, but you're going about this all wrong. Marry me, but in the way that we had planned. That's all I can offer."

The words came across strong, firm. It made her feel good to clear the air, to speak up for herself. Something told her that she wasn't going to lose him. Gazing into his sad brown eyes, part of her was so angry with him and the other part felt sorry for the pain he was going through. She caught a glimpse of the small, insecure boy he had once been.

"I need some time, Morgan." He stood, and headed straight for the shower.

Since that day at the diner, Declan and Amber had become close friends. This was a friendship built on trust and companionship. From time to time, he could see that Amber wanted more, but she did a good job disguising her feelings, playing the role of a good friend. But he knew, and heck, if Morgan didn't haunt his very soul, he would ask her to be his girl in a heartbeat. It was the first time in years that he actually felt alive, back in the land of the living. This little woman was rescuing him from a dark place, giving him drive and purpose.

In his heart, he knew that he was meant to meet her. When Amber had casually mentioned that she wished she had more time to volunteer at the shelter, Declan jumped on an idea. He had plenty of free time, why couldn't he volunteer some of his time? So, Declan began working at the shelter during the week when Amber was busy working at the doctor's office. He and Cathy had also become friendly, not as close as what he had with Amber, but he liked the woman and she was almost like a sister to Amber.

"You two are getting pretty close, aren't you?" Cathy inquired one day at the shelter. Although he and Cathy were on good terms, Cathy remained fiercely protective over Amber.

"I guess you could say that." Declan grabbed the food tub and made his way down the row of kennels, opening them and making small talk with the housed dogs.

Cathy made her way to the office but then turned to speak. "Declan?"

He should have known that Cathy wasn't finished with their conversation. She had been throwing little hints here and there over the past few months.

"Declan, you and Amber have been friends for a while, right?"

He supposed that some might consider it to be a while.

"Well, it's just that I know she tries her best to hide it, but that girl has feelings for you."

Cathy busied herself, bending down to pet Harry, one of their latest arrivals. The tiny mutt barked his approval.

"I like her. She's a great friend."

Always being a man of few words, Declan said the least possible to contribute to this conversation, but was bound to end with Cathy's disapproval.

"But that's all." She frowned. It wasn't a question.

Declan could feel his pulse pick up. He liked Amber, enjoyed her company immensely. "What is it that you'd like me to say? I like her. We're great friends. Amber is a very sweet, beautiful—"

Cathy stopped him short of finishing. " _But_ you don't like her like that."

Declan froze to the spot, staring at Cathy for a moment. "Cathy, you have to know that I won't hurt her. I promise you that. That woman means the world to me."

"That I believe. But what is it? Why can't you take the next step?"

_The next step?_ That comment irritated him more than he knew it should have. Placing the bin of food at his feet, Declan moved closer to her.

"What exactly is the _next step_ , Cathy?"

Cathy was pushing boundaries, here. She was butting in where she didn't belong.

"I've already been there, done that." He shouldn't have commented, but the words escaped.

"Been there, done that? Can I be honest here?" Cathy's voice rose as she gazed up at Declan's face.

"Please do. What is this all about? I mean, things are good between us, just leave it alone."

"Are they? I'm going to tell you one more time that Amber likes you, _really_ likes you, and she knows that Morgan was the only one who will ever completely capture your heart and it kills her. Dammit, Declan."

A few times Amber had questioned him about the break up with Morgan, and he had remained silent.

"Maybe Amber should talk to me, Cathy, to _me_. Maybe she shouldn't be speaking about our relationship to others, people who couldn't possibly understand." Now his voice was rising, shaking. Tightening his fists, he tried to steady his breathing.

"You're a stubborn fool, Declan, a stubborn fool. You couldn't ask for a better woman. Don't you dare hurt her." She slammed the door to Harry's cage then stomped off to the office, slamming that door behind her too.

"Dammit!" He pounded his fist against Harry's cage, knowing that he and Amber would need to have a little talk this evening.

Gathering up his things, he realized that he was beat and decided to head home so that he could have some space to think. He heard her voice before he saw her standing there. Looking sweet and beautiful, childlike. He didn't want to hurt this woman, swore he wouldn't. But wasn't he hurting her by not giving her what she wanted, needed? It didn't go unnoticed to him that Amber hadn't dated anyone since they had met. As irritated as he was moments before when he heard how she had been speaking to Cathy about their relationship, his heart melted a bit just looking at her.

"Hey, Declan. I got off early, thought I'd swing by to say hi. It looks like Cathy's in a foul mood. What gives?"

Sighing inwardly, he bit down on his lip. Amber drew closer, her wide smile slipping away as she approached him.

"Oh, you too? What happened?" Her eyes filled with concern.

"Amber, we need to talk." Frankly, he wasn't even sure exactly what he would say to her.

"Is everything okay?" Confusion etched her face; her brows scrunched.

"Yes, no. I don't know." Raking a hand through his dark hair, he grabbed for Amber's hand. "Let's get out of here, okay?"

Amber nodded as he pulled her through the office and out the front door, all the while avoiding Cathy.

"What's going on?" Amber placed her hands on his face once they were sitting in Declan's parked truck down by the river. It took Declan a few moments before he could find his voice.

"You know I wouldn't hurt you, right?" This was going to be a difficult conversation.

"Yes, Declan, of course I do. What's the problem?"

"I... I just can't... I can't give you any more of me." He hoped that she would understand. One thing he didn't want was for her to leave him. Amber's eyes drifted to the river as she released her hand.

"I don't understand where this is coming from." But something in her expression told him otherwise. Her conversations with Cathy proved that she wanted more.

"You and Cathy have been talking and well, she's looking out for you, but it still pissed me off that you told her about your unhappiness instead of telling me." That was one of the things that really ate at him. He thought they were close enough to tell each other everything.

"Declan, slow down. You're not making any sense."

Placing his large hand on her soft face, he focused on Amber's sky blue eyes. "Amber, honey, I feel that you want more, more from us."

Instantly, her hands flew up to cover her mouth. "Oh my God, she told you, didn't she? Cathy told you about our conversation. I made her promise not to say anything. I'm sorry, Declan, she shouldn't have butted in..."

Grabbing her hands from off her face and holding them a bit tighter than he had intended, he attempted to make her see. "No, it's probably a good thing. I thought you were okay with this, with us." But of course Cathy didn't need to say anything, he saw it in her face every day and it crushed him.

Amber pulled at Declan's arms. "Declan, I'm not going to lie. I do have feelings for you and I think that you feel the same, if you would just admit it to yourself. I can wait, I'm a patient woman."

"Amber, can't you see? How can I be any more honest with you? I think you're great, beautiful, a catch. You're slowly becoming one of my best friends. But, how can I say this? My heart... it belongs to Morgan." He had never led her on, had he? Oh God, what had he done to this poor girl?

Amber's eyes flooded with tears. "Then if you love her so much, why the hell don't you go after her? What is going on with you and her?"

"You wouldn't understand." It was a simple statement, but it meant so much more.

"You're right, Declan. How could I understand when you never open up to me?" After opening the passenger door with force, Amber got out and slammed the door tight.

If it wasn't for his leg, he could have caught up to her, but it was of no use. He stood there, like a fool, calling for her. "Amber, come here. I'm sorry!"

Amber spun on her heels, heading straight for him. Anger and hurt stained her face.

"Don't leave like this, please," he pleaded like a small boy. He didn't want anything to change; he couldn't stand it.

For the briefest of moments, the two stood, just gazing at each other. This had to be one of the kindest women alive. He should have his head examined for not wanting to date her.

He had to turn away. Just for the briefest second, Declan thought, _what if?_ What if he kissed her that very moment? Daring to look into the depths of her eyes, he saw the face of an angel.

"Declan, God help me." She grabbed his face and pressed her lips to his, as if searching for him to respond.

He did, he was helpless not to. It felt funny, nice at first, but as he found himself caught up in her kiss, his heart wanted Morgan, only Morgan. He pulled back abruptly, eyes wide.

There was no way she could misinterpret his expression. She smacked his chest, crying out his name and then started to run again.

"Amber." It was a soft cry. "Come here. I'll tell you. I'll tell you everything." But of course she was too far away to hear him. She was gone.

# CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

By the end of the workday, Mike had come around. Every few hours, Morgan had made an excuse to run over to check her cell phone. Elle wasn't fooled; she had told Morgan that he would come around, but questioned as to whether Mike was truly the one for her. Was she just afraid of being alone?

It felt right to be with Mike, but her feelings were all jammed up; if her past with Declan weren't an issue, Morgan was pretty sure that their relationship would be without problems. Questioning herself as to her share of blame in the drama of her relationship with Mike was getting to be old hat.

He was waiting for her with red roses when she arrived home that evening.

Hesitation caused Morgan to wait until he spoke first. Mike shifted from foot to foot, as nervous as a schoolboy. Why, oh why hadn't she developed feelings for Mike that rivaled the intensity and passion of her past relationship with Declan? It wasn't anything that Mike had or hadn't done. She was emotionally scarred and her fiancé had suffered because of it.

"Mike."

"Morgan."

They both spoke at once, causing Morgan to laugh nervously. She tried once more.

"Mike, I'm so happy to see you." And she was; she had been anxious all day, just wondering if he would come around.

"Baby, I'm sorry. About everything."

He gently grabbed her hands in his, bringing them up to his mouth for a delicate kiss. Morgan grabbed him tightly, holding onto him. Feeling his hands reach up to stroke her back, she sighed. They weren't in the clear yet.

"I do feel that we need to talk, to get everything out in the open." Morgan had a lot she needed to say.

"What else is there to say?" Mike frowned slightly, drawing her hands close beside him.

"I want to talk, be honest with each other. If this is going to work, I need to clear the air, be honest about everything."

"Oh. I thought that we were honest with each other, I mean, I know that I am with you." Mike averted his eyes as he spoke.

That was odd; she could have sworn that a strange look had just passed over his eyes. What could he be holding back?

"I am with you, too, for the most part. Sit, let's talk."

Morgan led the way to the living room, to sit on the oversized couch.

"Mike, I want to tell you everything, everything that I keep close to my heart, but I'm afraid you'll be jealous and not understand. I need you to understand. I don't want to stop thinking about Declan. He's in my heart, he always will be. Just as if you and I were separated by something, a piece of my heart would always belong to you." There she said it. No more lurking around, trying on Declan's ring, hiding her nightmares from him.

That peculiar look appeared on Mike's face once more.

"I need you to stop being mad if I dream of him. You're with me now and just relax. I'm not going anywhere."

It was now his turn. Morgan waited, but it took Mike a few moments to gather his words.

"Morgan, I wish that you could love me as much as you loved him, that's all I ask. If you did, perhaps I wouldn't feel so insecure."

"But I..."

"Don't, Morgan. I'm not a fool. You don't have the same feelings. Sure, you might love me as much as you could possibly love another man, but don't lie to me, please don't lie."

She swallowed, hard, contemplating her next words carefully. "Okay, our love is different. Honey, _I'm_ different. Perhaps if I had met you first, I wouldn't feel so..."

"Jaded?" He finished her sentence for her.

Confusion set in. How could she escape this conversation without hurting his fragile feelings?

"I... I don't know. Call it what you will, this experience has changed me, I can't deny it."

"But it still wouldn't matter, would it? If he came first or I came first. You and Declan share a bond that nobody else can break."

Was it sarcasm dripping from his lips? And why was he speaking as if Declan were still around?

"Mike, don't." Prickling sensations covered her scalp, was this fear? She didn't like the direction this conversation was headed.

Mike was on his feet, pacing the floor. He stopped to face her.

"No, if we're going to be honest here, really honest, tell me the truth. I swear, Morgan, you'd better tell me the truth right here and now. Am I wasting my time? Have I wasted the past couple of years, hoping that my girlfriend, my _fiancée,_ will miraculously grow to love me more than her dead fiancé?" With each word, his voice grew louder, more agitated.

This was it, the moment of truth. What could she say? How had this conversation taken such a drastic turn? Would it do any good to deny her feelings?

"Mike. What you're saying is true. I loved him, at the time, with my entire heart. Now, I do love you, but please understand that given the circumstances, my heart isn't whole to give. What is left is yours, that I can promise you." Oh my God, she hadn't meant it to come out quite like that, but she was being honest.

Mike turned, came up very close to her face and then backed away, tears shining in his eyes. She was a selfish, selfish person; she should have never started a relationship with him years ago when she wasn't ready. Now, both she and Mike were paying the price. He was out the door and she was on the floor, left broken and alone, the red roses long forgotten.

It felt good to get everything off his chest; it was a cleansing of sorts. Declan had persisted, calling and texting Amber, pleading with her to stop by his house. It had taken her a few hours, but late that evening, thankfully, she had come around. When he finished his heartrending tale, he dared to look her in the eyes. Amber's gaze spoke of sorrow, misunderstanding, confusion, but ultimately hope.

"You poor, poor thing." Sobbing, Amber grabbed him in a hug and held on for what seemed like hours. Fresh tears spilled from his own eyes. Realizing that Amber was the only person he really confided in besides his therapist and Stephen back home, he knew that he would do whatever it took to keep his friendship with her on solid ground.

Amber now seemed to get it; there was a new look about her, as if she didn't take the rejection personally. His biggest fear in sharing this story with Amber was that she would perhaps consider him awful for what he had done to her. It went beyond Morgan, though. He never lied to his mother, but asking her to lie to Morgan in the beginning, before his mom deteriorated to such an extent, caused her so much grief. By the time he had considered actually telling Morgan, his mom was incoherent and didn't seem to remember anything about the lie. Most of the time lately, she didn't even recognize him or remember that she had a son.

"Do you think I'm terrible, Amber?" His worst fears surfaced. Waiting an endless moment, Declan bit his lip.

"Terrible? Declan, yes, it was terrible. It was awful. But it was also the most selfless, giving thing I've ever heard of. The only thing I don't understand is why, now, why you didn't try to contact her. She must be heartbroken."

"She's engaged." It sounded awful, even to his own ears. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to think she had just moved on with her life, not caring about her ex-fiancé.

"Engaged? You mean she just moved on?"

Shaking his head firmly, Declan set the record straight. "No, it was never like that. My buddy, Stephen, I swore him to secrecy and he has been keeping tabs on her for a while. I know that Morgan has suffered every bit as much as I have. If only I would have figured that into my stupid plan."

He should have known that although he wasn't going to be there physically to burden Morgan, she, like him, would remain haunted emotionally by their love. Stephen had even needed to back off after a few months because he couldn't stand the heartache.

"But surely this calls for drastic measures. Before the wedding, she needs to know. You owe it to her." Amber was insistent.

"No, you're wrong. After all this time, I owe it to her to leave her alone, let her move on with her life." He was sure it was the right thing to do. "Besides, I'm a train wreck. Look at me."

"Oh, I see. But then you'll just suffer and never move on with your own life?" Amber was tough, he had to give her that. She was like a little tough love package, spilling her thoughts.

"Who knows, maybe someday I will," he muttered. If he could have retracted those words, he would, for he saw a spark of hope in her gaze.

Clearing her throat, the spark dissipated. "I'm sorry, Declan, but you need to tell her."

Believing that she couldn't possibly understand the complexities of his situation, he rationalized that he had his own reasons for backing off.

"Amber, honey. I know you mean well, but please, I've told you everything. Now please, drop it."

Her mouth set in a firm line; her eyes told him that she wouldn't let this go. He wouldn't hold her back, but if the day came that he was ever ready for a relationship and she was available, he would sweep her off her feet, treat her like she deserved to be treated, like a queen. He had such complicated feelings for her, but for now, to be fair, he would keep his mind on loving her as a friend. There was only room in his heart for one.

# CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

"Maybe it truly isn't meant to be."

Elle was trying to help, but her words only upset Morgan more. Elle had come over in a flash for Morgan when she had called her, sobbing into the phone. Now, Morgan wasn't so sure that Elle being here was the best thing. Some time alone to think may have been a better call.

Elle had made it no secret that she was slowly coming to dislike Mike. Her friend had never voiced her feelings aloud, but judging from the decline in double dates that used to fill her calendar, Morgan knew.

"You don't like him anymore, do you?" She sniffled, grabbing a tissue from the kitchen.

"It's not that I don't like him, honey. It's just that I don't think he's being fair to you, asking you to hide your feelings all the time, making you feel guilty," Elle stammered.

Perhaps she should feel guilty; maybe she had put this poor man through the ringer with all her nightmares and placing Declan on a pedestal. Surely enough time had gone by that she should be able to rein in her feelings better than this.

"Elle, don't take this the wrong way, but I need you to leave, please." There were some things that she must attend to.

Confusion was etched on Elle's face. "But... I just got here."

"I have to take care of something. I'm heading out. I'll walk you to the door." Morgan could feel the tension coming from her friend. After gathering her keys and bag, Morgan ushered her friend to the front door.

"What are you going to do? Are you going to break it off with Mike?" A spark of hope filled her gaze.

"I need to talk to him, and, no, I don't plan on breaking it off." A definitive line was set on her mouth. Yes, she would head over to the apartment that he shared with the guys and tell him to come back.

Elle steeled her, placing her hands on Morgan's shoulders. "Morgan, are you serious? I mean, I think that you have every right to your feelings about Declan."

Blowing out a fierce breath, Morgan's patience was thinning. "Okay, yes, that may be true, but this has got to be very difficult for Mike."

"Don't you see? If he truly loved you he would understand and accept your feelings..."

Elle was crossing boundaries here, ones that she should be treading carefully.

"Elle, with all due respect, I am going to pretend that you never said that. Are you actually telling me that Mike doesn't love me?" The pitch of her voice rose higher, a clear indication that her patience was waning.

Elle shook her head and quickly clamped her mouth shut. This time, neither said a word as they headed out to the driveway. Elle turned to face her friend before getting into her own car.

"Listen, I appreciate your concern, but could you please just let me handle this without judging Mike?"

"Fine, Morgan. If that's what you want," Elle replied as she opened the door to her car. Morgan waited for Elle to pull out of the driveway before heading out herself.

For the length of the car ride over to Mike's place, Morgan's mind was reeling with thoughts of Mike, Declan, and Elle. It was too much to sort out, but she knew that Mike was her first priority.

Upon approaching his driveway, Morgan practiced breathing calm, steady breaths. She would need to be relaxed for this conversation. Luckily Mike's car was in the driveway, and it appeared that his roommates were not home. Steadying herself, Morgan stepped out of her car and walked to the front steps. Smoothing her top, she took one more breath and pressed the doorbell. Seconds passed before she heard the telltale footsteps signaling that Mike was coming to the door.

It appeared that he had been losing sleep; shadows played across his face. Her heart went out to him. Deciding that too many words would just muddy the waters, Morgan blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Hi, Mike."

He stood, hands planted on his hips, his eyes giving nothing away. She leaned closer to him. At first he resisted, pulling back slightly, until she pressed her lips to his.

"Damn you, Morgan. Damn you," he breathed in her ear, pulling her inside the door and leading her upstairs.

Six Months Later

The past months had been all about getting to know each other again, this time without the drama and disagreements. They went ahead with plans to marry in a way that would make Morgan happy; she could have her bridesmaids and reception. The big day was coming up, in a little over a week to be exact.

Her dress was a stunning bright white that set off her skin tone. The neckline enhanced her figure while the train was a traditional puffy but tasteful complement. She could have spent countless hours searching for a dress that she considered perfect. It wasn't as if she had settled on the dress, not really, because the type of dress she had envisioned for herself wasn't easy to find, therefore she chose one that was more conventional. Morgan was happy with her choice now and that was fine.

They were to have 125 guests, more people than she had expected to invite, but it was difficult to cross people off her list; she wanted everyone to celebrate their special day.

Morgan had wanted an outdoor ceremony, perhaps on the beach or somewhere in a romantic meadow, but Mike had insisted that it just wasn't practical because the weather couldn't be predicted. Inside it was, where she could plan regardless the weather. She supposed it made sense.

She and Declan had spoken of going to Costa Rica, so she wanted to pick someplace different, although Costa Rica was right up there with favorite destinations. Mike stated several times that he would love to see Cozumel, so Morgan decided that Mexico it was. Ten long, romantic days in Mexico sounded like heaven.

It was a good feeling, putting her trust in her relationship with Mike. For the first time in years, she felt settled in her life with Mike. He was a good, solid, honest man, and she was a lucky woman to have him. Each day with him, she treated him well and tried her best to be upbeat and positive. The nightmares and thoughts continued, and maybe they always would. Perhaps it was a way that she would always remain connected with Declan, and so be it. This time, she had perspective and would hold Declan in a private space in her heart.

Even Elle seemed to be coming around, basking in her role as maid of honor. Morgan was excited to get started on the rest of her life with Mike. They spoke of their dreams together, including having children. Morgan had always dreamed of taking a few years off from work, holding her tenure, and then returning to work to continue her career. It seemed the perfect balance.

Morgan was due at the dress shop for one of her final fittings in about a half hour when she received a text message. Smiling to herself, she figured it would be Mike, wishing her luck, telling her how beautiful she would look in the dress.

Her heart stilled when she saw the message was from Stephen. What on Earth could he possibly want now? Did he want to wish her happiness with her upcoming wedding?

It's Stephen. Call me when you get a chance.

How odd. Seconds later, Mike's text came through, wishing her luck with the fitting, telling her how stunning she would look. Morgan typed back a quick response to Mike while pondering over the Stephen dilemma. Of course she should call him back, but what if just speaking to him set her back, letting her mind free to think about all things Declan? But that was silly, of course. She was a grown woman, in control of her own mind and emotions. Stealing a glance at her kitchen clock, Morgan saw that she had a few minutes to give him a call before Mike was due back from getting his car serviced. It would have to be a quick conversation otherwise she would be late for her appointment.

The pounding of her heart told Morgan that this would be a difficult conversation. She glanced at the text and hit the button to respond to call him. After only one ring, Stephen picked up.

"Morgan!" He sounded excited or maybe nervous to hear from her. Butterflies flitted around her own insides as she found her voice.

"Hi Stephen," she squeaked.

Her heart raced in her chest. Funny, Declan had always joked that if something were to happen to him, she should date Stephen. The idea was absurd; Stephen was like a brother to her. After some preliminary chatter, he got down to business.

"Morgan, I have some bad news I thought you should know." His voice frightened Morgan and at once she figured it out. _Oh my God, it has to be Declan's mom._

"No! Please don't tell me that something happened to Mrs. Blake."

But she already knew it in her heart, and his silence only confirmed her fears. A tear spilled down her cheek; she would always consider that woman to be like a mother to her.

"I'm sorry. It's very sad, but she'll be in a better place. You know that."

She did, and for that she was relieved.

He continued on, "I just figured that you might want to pay your respects, I mean if you can't..."

Was he kidding? Of course she did. That woman meant the world to her. Come hell or high water, she would find a way to attend her services. But how could she without Mike becoming upset? She could pretend that she was going on a pre-wedding trip with Elle, but that would be starting married life off on a lie, and they had promised each other that there would be no more lies. Tough, Mike would just have to deal with it. She wasn't compromising when it came to Mrs. Blake.

"No, I'm going. Where will the services be held, Florida?" She heard silence and then hesitation.

"Yes, the services will be held in Florida. Are you sure about this?" Stephen sputtered.

"Absolutely. I'm going. As a matter of fact, we can catch a flight together." She was firm about her beliefs. This was the right thing to do, the only thing to do.

"But, there's something..." His voice drifted as Morgan thought she heard the door to her house opening. Shoot, Mike was back already? What was Stephen mumbling about?

"Stephen, I have to go. Book the flight and I'll pay you later."

She slammed her cell down, wiped her cheeks, and prepared to face Mike. He wouldn't like this, not one little bit. Bracing herself for the impending argument, Morgan fidgeted in her spot at the counter.

"How did it go?" Mike was all smiles, meandering into the kitchen.

Shoot! Her fitting! There was no way she could make it now, she would have to call and reschedule.

"Um, I didn't go," Morgan mumbled, glancing down at the granite counter.

"What? Why not?" Mike's face registered worry.

_Here goes._ Pressing her lips together, Morgan wished there was another way.

"Sit down, please. We need to talk about something."

Mike did as he was asked, moving his seat close to Morgan.

"Morgan, what is it? Is everything okay?" He placed his hands on her cheeks, gazing into her eyes with concern.

"It's Mrs. Blake, Declan's mom. You know how close we were." She needed to just spit it out, get it out in the open.

Mike shook his head, sitting back. "I don't understand. What does this have to do with your fitting?" His eyes darted across her face. "Talk to me, Morgan, for God's sake, talk to me."

No, this wouldn't go well, not at all. "Mike, I love you very much, but I have to go to the services."

There. She said it. Daring a look at his face, it was worse than she had expected. She cringed, waiting for him to blow.

He pounded his fist on the counter, rising at once. "What? Are you serious?" he shouted, pacing the floor. "No way! No way am I letting you go!"

What was this? Who did he think he was, ordering her around like this?

"Mike, you'd better calm down, or I swear right here and now, you're going to lose me. You're being completely irrational."

"I said no!"

Morgan shrunk back, witnessing the scene before her. Mike smashed his fist at the wall, causing the wall to crumble.

"Oh my God, Mike!" she shrieked, jumping from the kitchen stool. She was prepared to tell him to leave, to cool off, when suddenly he turned and clenched his fists to his sides.

"I'm sorry, but you can't go. I forbid it." Steely eyes met hers.

Did he just say that he _forbid_ it?

"I'm sorry, but what did you just say to me?" Her voice was dangerously low.

Mike stepped back at bit, as if realizing, too late, the mistake he'd made. He gulped loudly, raking his hands through his hair.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to come out like that." He pleaded with his eyes. "Please don't go. I beg you."

My God, the man was begging; his face registered panic. But it was time to stand her ground.

"Take it or leave it, Mike. I'm going and there's nothing that you can say or do to change my mind, so deal with it."

In the back of her mind, she felt a strange feeling of triumph. This was maybe that scene in a movie where the audience clapped loudly for their heroine. He stared at her for the longest moment and then nodded his head, as if accepting the situation.

"Okay, okay... fine. But I want to go with you."

Was he kidding? Why on earth would he possibly want to torture himself with going? Was this a sense of control that he was trying to exercise over her? What was with him?

"I don't think it's a good idea. Don't get upset, but I'm planning on going with Stephen, Declan's friend."

Mike's face visibly went from red to a strange shade of purple. He waited moments before speaking. "If we're going to be fair about this, I want to go."

"Fine, but this is really ridiculous. You won't even know anybody there, but fine! Now, I'm going to clear my head."

Morgan swooped up her bag and grabbed the keys from above the doorway. Mike didn't try to stop her.

# CHAPTER NINETEEN

He was just coming in from the dog park with D when he got the news. Betty, his favorite nurse from Sunset Pines had called him. D was all over him, smothering him with kisses as he hung up his phone. Instead of reprimanding the dog, he clung to her for all he was worth. He knew this was coming, but it didn't soften the blow.

Memories of his mom and dad flooded his mind. D seemed to understand, as she clung tightly by Declan's side. How could he mange without his mom? It wouldn't be the same, not ever. Betty quietly instructed him to plan for the service. His first thoughts went instantly to Morgan. She should be there, for she loved his mother almost as much as he did. But that could never happen. Next, his thoughts went to Amber. He needed a friend right now. He placed the call and didn't wait long for her to arrive at his door.

"Sweetie, come here." She pulled him in, kissing him gingerly on the cheek.

He sobbed into her shoulder for what seemed like hours. Amber said that she would help him take care of everything, including calling the few relatives he had left and Stephen. She was something else; he didn't know how he would have made it through this without her by his side.

"Do you need me to stay?" Amber inquired softly when it grew dark outside.

Asking her to stay would mean trouble; he wasn't in his right mind and didn't think it would be appropriate.

"You're an angel. Thank you, but no." Was it disappointment on her face or just sadness for him?

"Okay, I'm going to get going."

Amber hesitated for a moment by the door. She looked so innocent and beautiful standing there. For a second, he wished to scoop her up and give himself to her. It wasn't right, though, and it never would be.

"Declan?"

"Hmm?" His trance was broken.

"Are you going to let her know?" Hope filled Amber's eyes as tears misted over.

"No."

She seemed to accept his answer as she turned and walked out the door and into the warm, dark night air.

It wouldn't do her any good if she knew. As a matter of fact, it would only make her life more difficult. Stephen had informed him that Morgan was due to marry any day now, so what was the point? Besides, just seeing her again, well, he couldn't predict what kind of reaction she would draw from him.

For a moment he was lost in her — her face, hair, her very being. He could almost smell her baby powder-scented perfume. His heart ached for her. This was nonsense, there was no way he would put himself or her through undeniable torture.

Suddenly another thought was upon him. What if one day they crossed paths, for whatever reason? What would she think of him? She would have every right to be angry, to never speak to him again. He didn't want their relationship flawed; funny as it sounded, their love stayed pure and innocent right where it was now.

It took Amber mere seconds to text him. He should have known that the woman was relentless, that she wouldn't give up easily.

**We need to talk about this. I think the time has come to make things right** _._

Was she out of her mind?

**No way,** he texted right back.

His phone remained silent after that.

Morgan couldn't get him to change his mind, no matter what she said, so Mike would be joining her in Florida. What was the difference anyway? She just didn't understand why that man was being so stubborn, so difficult about this. He was acting as if their very relationship depended upon him joining her, like he would lose her otherwise.

Ever since she had received that call from Stephen, Mike was acting desperate, peculiar.

Stephen would go down on his own; Morgan wasn't in the mood for this trip to be more awkward than it needed to be. Imagine that, Mike, Stephen, and her, the happy friends traveling together. Even she had to laugh at that.

Having secured a round-trip flight and reservations at a local motel for three nights for just the two of them, she had just started packing when she heard Mike arrive home from work.

"Mike?"

She wanted to pack shorts for him but couldn't find any in the attic. The weather prediction called for warm, muggy temperatures. He wasn't answering.

"Mike? Could you come here please?" she tried again, but still no answer.

Padding down the hallway, she searched for him and found him in the kitchen, just staring into space.

"Mike? I was calling you. Where are your shorts from last summer?"

Mike faced her, stress etched onto his face. There was something wrong; she knew it in an instant.

"What is it?" As she reached for him, he turned away, eyes glistening with tears.

"I can't go."

_Oh_. To her, the news wasn't all that bad, but she wondered what was making him so upset.

"It's no big deal. I told you, I'll be back in a few days, no worries." She smiled up at him, taking his hands in hers.

"It _is_ a big deal. I wanted to go and now I have to go away for work."

He slammed his fists on the granite counter, causing Morgan to step back and grab at her chest.

"What has gotten into you? I mean, you're acting like a child." That probably wasn't the best choice of words, given the look on his face right now.

"Morgan. Promise me something, please." Instead of getting angrier, he grew sullen, melancholy.

"Yes, anything."

"Promise me that you'll always love me."

Stepping closer to him, she scrunched her face up to look him in the eye.

"Of course. Don't be silly." He was really behaving in such an insecure way.

Morgan excused herself to continue packing and before she knew it, the night was upon them. Mike was clingy all evening and as they lay side by side, he was emotional.

For a second, right after he had said good night to her, Morgan thought she heard him say that he was sorry. It was a mere whisper, but she could have sworn she heard it. Her mind must have been playing tricks though, what could he have been sorry about?

Amber and Cathy were beyond helpful in planning his mother's wake. It was to be simple, sweet, and quiet. Just what his mother would have wanted.

Declan and Amber were the first to arrive; Amber took charge to ensure that everything was in order while Declan excused himself to take a breath of fresh air. The air was stifling, which made it even harder for him to catch his breath. Guests were due to arrive momentarily. Honestly, he didn't expect many people to attend, perhaps some people that she had grown friendly with at her development and some nurses from the home.

Amber stepped outside to join him, looking sweet in a simple dress. Almost immediately he was in her arms, sobbing. It was hitting him hard now, all the memories, good and bad.

"What would I do without you?" He stroked her face, gazing at the depths of her blue eyes. "You're going to make some man really lucky one day, you know?" The comment didn't make her smile but appeared to sadden her.

"Declan," she whimpered. "Don't."

More than once, he had thought that he was being selfish, holding onto their friendship when he should just let her go. She swore she was okay with their relationship, but her eyes gave her away. As selfish as it sounded, he held on because he did love her, just not in that mind-blowing way that he knew existed.

"Hey, buddy." It was a voice he could never forget, from that first day of second grade.

Stephen had been there for him, and he was now right here, stepping out of a rental car. A smile lightened his face as he took in his childhood friend, looking handsome in a suit.

Hugs were exchanged and introductions were made. Stephen straightened his posture when his eyes rested on Amber. She turned her eyes down, shuffling her feet. If he wasn't mistaken, Declan could have sworn that she was blushing. No, it was probably just the Florida heat. But there it was again, the look exchanged between his two friends.

Funny thing, Stephen always had his fair share of attention from the ladies, with his shaggy brown hair and blue eyes. It didn't surprise him to think that Amber might find Stephen attractive. And Amber, well, it would shock him to find a man that didn't find her beautiful. Very interesting. An idea began to take shape in his mind.

"Let's head inside, huh? The guests are due to arrive."

Leading the way, Declan turned to see his friends making small talk behind him. As humid as it was outside, Declan was grateful that the air inside was cooled by the air-conditioning system. Prone to sweating, he mopped his forehead with his handkerchief before stepping inside.

A few elderly guests had arrived as well as his cousins, aunt, and uncle. He hadn't seen them in ages; it was nice of them to attend the service. He was making his way over to greet his relatives, when he thought to introduce Stephen and Amber. Glancing over at them, he chuckled slightly at the sight of them, deep in conversation. He would just leave them alone for now.

Stephen headed over after a few minutes, a serious look on his face. He had to be upset about his mom, also. His mom and Stephen had gotten along quite well over the years. Stephen advanced, the look on his face odd.

"Can I speak with you for a sec?" Stephen's voice shook a bit. He cleared his throat and took hold of Declan's elbow, guiding him to the door.

"Declan!" It was Uncle Bill, from California.

His uncle hadn't aged since the last time he saw him, about five years ago. Declan ambled over towards his uncle, limping slightly. His leg ached today, the high humidity doing a number on him. As he was winding up his conversation with Uncle Bill, he noticed Tach walking through the door.

"Give me a minute, buddy, and I'm all yours." Declan placed his hand on his friend's shoulder, noting the look of worry on Stephen's face.

He turned to walk towards Tach, glad that his friend had stopped by. It had almost slipped his mind that Stephen had wanted to speak with him. Scanning the room for his friend, he spotted him wrapped up in a conversation with none other than Amber once again. _Good for you, man._ It hit him that if he were to choose any woman in the world for Stephen, it would be Amber. The thought had not occurred to him before, but why not? Distance might prove to be a challenge, but stranger things had happened.

Chatter filled the small room; Declan was pleased to see how many people had shown up to pay respects to his mom. He stood on the outskirts of a conversation between his aunt and Betty from the nursing home when his world turned upside down.

There, not fifteen feet away from him, she stood. For God's sake, Morgan was standing before him like a ghost from the past.

# CHAPTER TWENTY

Where was he? Stephen had planned on arriving over an hour ago, but she didn't see him anywhere in the small crowd. A sweet-looking blonde woman came into view, playing with her hair, smiling widely. She should have known, there he was, flirting with this beauty. With a smart grin on her face, Morgan headed over to Stephen, glad to have found a familiar face.

It was the expression on his face that first caused her to wonder what was wrong. Stephen held up his hand, as if to stop her in her tracks. A look not unlike guilt covered his face as Morgan came closer. _What's wrong? Something is wrong here._ And then she saw him standing there. He stood, silent and tall, dark hair, blue eyes. _My God, Declan's ghost is here with his mother_ , was her only thought before she felt the air sucked from her body. She was out cold before she hit the floor.

"Morgan! Morgan!"

His voice made her smile, he was right beside her. Maybe she was with him now, safe and sound, home at last.

"Morgan!"

Somebody was ripping her away from him, trying to break them apart.

"No! Leave me alone."

This is where she wanted to be now, she was by his side; she could even smell him.

Faraway voices mumbled. _She hit her head. I saw it. What happened? Did she pass out? Leave her, give her space. I've got it._

_Was that Stephen?_ Slowly, she opened her eyes, struggling to make sense of the sight before her. It was Declan holding her, crouching beside her on the floor. She reached out to touch his face, certain that he would disappear. He didn't.

"Declan! My God, Declan!" She locked eyes with him and sat straight up, wincing as she held her head. It was sore; she must have hit it hard going down. _Dear God, how could this be? How could this be?_

"Here, sit up slowly, take it slowly." He was sitting now, beside her, at a strange angle.

She was on the verge of passing out again when Stephen appeared before her, horror written all over his face.

"I tried to tell you, Morgan. I tried so many times," he cried out, glancing back and forth between her and Declan.

He was alive. _He's alive. He's alive!_

Morgan wept openly, clinging to Declan for dear life. He was alive. She pressed herself close to him, so close as to be certain that nobody could take him from her ever again.

He looked older — his eyes seemed old, that was it, like they had been through hell and back. She ran her eyes over his arms, his jacket off and sleeves now rolled up. Perspiration clung to him. He had burns covering part of his forearm. _What had he been through?_

"Declan?" Witnessing a look between Declan and Stephen, suddenly she saw the whole picture. _My God, you lied to me. All this time, you lied!_

She was on her feet in a flash. Declan stumbled when she threw him off her; Stephen helped his friend to his feet. Something was wrong with Declan, his body, the way he held himself, something was seriously wrong. _No! No! It's wrong. This is all so horribly wrong!_

"You! And You!" Her finger wavered between Declan and Stephen, her mouth open in horror. "Get away from me! Both of you!"

She turned and smacked right into the little blonde, who stood gaping at the scene before her. Actually, everyone in the room stood with mouths open, eyes wide. It registered in her mind that she was causing a scene, here, at Mrs. Blake's service, but her emotions were wild; she was unable to get control. The only thing on her mind was getting as far away from here as possible.

With all the strength she could muster, she dragged herself to her rental car through wracking sobs. His voice, that voice that she had longed to hear, just one more time, the voice she had heard time and again in her dreams, her nightmares, was calling out her name, begging her to stop. _I won't look back. I won't look back._

"Dammit, Morgan! Don't get in the car like that. You shouldn't be driving!" he yelled, attempting to close the space between them, but not succeeding.

He wasn't the same, it was clear that he wasn't walking correctly, but to hell with him, to hell with him for making her cry every single day for years. With the slam of her car door, she started the engine with trembling hands.

Declan was closing in. She screeched out of the parking lot, not knowing where she was headed. She just needed to get away. How could he have lied to her all these years? There was nothing in the world that would explain and justify his behavior.

She should pull over; she was in no condition to drive a car. Morgan found a spot to pull over a few blocks away, at the end of a quiet street. Laying her head in her hands, she cried until no more tears would come. She needed someone to talk to. Mike. She needed Mike. He would never do this to her; he loved her too much. Her trembling fingers managed to find his number; she silently prayed that he would support her, that he would understand her grief.

"Mike." She crumbled when she heard his voice over the line. "Mike, I need you."

She couldn't catch her breath; it all came rushing back to her when she tried to explain everything that had happened. Mike had to make sense of it all. Her head pounded fiercely; she thought it would explode.

"Mike, please, say something." The silence was deafening until finally he spoke.

"My God, Morgan. What kind of a man could possibly do that? He's a bastard."

_Yes he is._ She breathed deeply, grateful that a man such as Mike existed, that a man such as Mike could love her.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?"

Raking his hands through his hair, Declan stood in the hot sun, sweat pouring from every inch of him. He knew that he would be sore in the morning from falling and stumbling back onto the floor. He had twisted his knee and it hurt like hell, but his anger hurt worse at the moment. How could Stephen bring her here? To his mother's service? The timing couldn't have been worse.

"How could you? How could you?" Declan demanded over and over, closing in on his friend.

He hadn't felt like this since high school, but he needed to hit something, someone, and Stephen was the perfect target. The punch knocked Stephen off his feet; Declan dropped heavily to the ground, going in for another hit. Stephen grabbed his hand, holding it closed. Tach, witness to the scene, prepared to come in between the two men but backed away slowly. His friend's arms were around Declan, holding him, steadying him, silencing his tears.

"I'm sorry. She wouldn't take no for an answer. You know how she is."

"You should have never told her, never," Declan sobbed.

"No, it needed to stop. You have no idea what you've done, how she looked, how she mourned you. It needed to stop. I couldn't live with myself," Stephen exclaimed.

"What have I done? My God, what have I done?" Declan looked at his friend, searching his face for understanding.

He knew that his friend would never agree with the pain he had caused, but he also knew that Stephen would be there for him, just like a brother.

"I think you need to go to her." Amber's voice jolted him out of his thoughts. How long had she been standing there listening?

"Amber, now is not the time. I'm the last person she wants to see."

But there was that determined look on her face, her jaw set hard.

"Stephen, give me Morgan's number."

"Are you crazy? She doesn't even know you. Let it go, Amber. Too much damage has been done." He hung his head low, a headache threatening.

"Stephen, give it to me." Amber reached for the phone that was already coming out of Stephen's jacket pocket.

Quick as a flash, she quickly found the programmed number and mouthed the numbers aloud as she punched them into her own cell.

"I've got somewhere I have to be. Stephen, it was nice to meet you." Amber raced to Declan's truck, starting it up with the keys that he'd foolishly left in the console. She tore out toward the road ahead.

Shaking his head, Declan looked up to see Stephen's eyes following the sound of the loud engine fading off into the distance. Stephen's jaw hung open, unable to form words.

"Tell me about it," Declan muttered, knowing right then and there that Stephen was caught up in Amber's spell.

It seemed that hours had gone by when in fact in was only minutes. Heading back to the motel by the water seemed to be the only decision she could make at the moment. Would she stay for the funeral in a few days? Surely this must be some kind of dream. All she had wanted, all she had wished for, was for Declan to be by her side. Now though, this seemed like the cruelest nightmare yet.

Evidence in the form of burn marks and the manner in which he carried himself pointed to the fact that he had been injured, quite seriously. Thinking was a good thing for her right now; she could dive into the role of detective in order to keep herself sane. She pulled into the small, pebbled lot and then parked her car.

Her cell rang, forcing her theories out the window. It was an unfamiliar number, the exchange from Florida. _Oh no, it could be Declan_. She wouldn't answer; she decided she wasn't speaking to him — probably ever again. How could he just lie? Cut her out of his life? She waited for the voicemail to beep through her phone and decided that she would at least listen to the message.

It wasn't him; it was a woman's voice, smooth and sweet sounding, coming through the line. She stated that her name was Amber and that she was a friend of Declan's. Amber pleaded that it was urgent that they speak. After hearing Amber rattle off her number, Morgan huffed and powered her phone down. _Nope, no way._

Grabbing her bag, she hurried into her room, which was waiting for her with the air-conditioning on full blast. How did people around here deal with these sweltering temperatures? New York could get hot too, but not most of the year at least.

_Why would he do this?_ Even Morgan knew in her heart that he wouldn't discard her without a damn good reason. She seriously doubted that he grew tired of their relationship or found another woman while he was in the Army fighting in Afghanistan. Her mind flashed to her little spot down by the tiny sliver of a beach on the Hudson River, where she honored his memory. It hurt like hell to think he would let her suffer all those years alone. And what was wrong with Stephen? No wonder he had distanced himself. Now that she was thinking and placing clues together, she was pretty sure that Stephen had been in on the secret from the start.

Deep in thought, she didn't hear the tapping on the door until it got louder, and then a woman's voice was yelling, demanding that she open the door at once. _Could it be the police acting like that? No, no._ The voice sounded familiar. Yes, it was that Amber woman from her phone message. She tiptoed to the door and peeked out the small window. It was the petite blonde from the service. That must be Amber. Unfortunately, Morgan had been spotted.

"I see you! Please, Morgan, I swear I won't leave until you let me in."

How did this little woman even find her? It was absurd to think how quickly she had been tracked.

Steeling herself, she figured she had no choice but to open the door and face this woman. She seemed as persistent as a bulldog.

Morgan flung the door open, exasperated. "What?"

"Thank God!" The little blonde pushed herself through the door and stood grounded at a spot near the small table at the side of the room.

"You know, this really isn't a good time." Morgan crossed her arms in front of her chest, guarding herself.

Amber came closer, pressing her hands on Morgan's shoulders. "Sit down, we need to talk."

"How did you find me?" Morgan demanded.

"I grew up here. There's not many local motels. Let's just say I also know a lot of the locals."

Morgan sat, but shook her head, taking the woman in. Amber was downright adorable. Her wispy blonde hair practically fell to her waist. She looked very young, or maybe just innocent. A stabbing feeling of jealousy took hold of her. This woman must be very close to Declan if she were behaving in this way. This was probably his girlfriend.

"I think you should go. I certainly don't need _this_ right now." Morgan's eyes rolled to the ceiling. The other woman caught on to her comment, shaking her head adamantly.

"No, it's nothing like that. Declan and I are close friends, that's it. I swear."

Oh, what did it even matter, honestly? Morgan figured it didn't at this point, since she was due to be married within days.

"Declan and I met a while back. He made it clear that his heart was already taken," Amber started slowly, her eyes never leaving Morgan's face.

"Well, there you go. He's a lying man who cheated on me," Morgan stated, rising from her chair.

Amber pulled her back down again.

"His heart was taken by a woman from New York, a teacher." Amber's eyes glossed with tears.

Morgan could barely contain her own. She swallowed and allowed the woman to continue her story.

"He never wanted to be a burden to you. His own mother spent so much of her life caring for Declan's father."

"I know. I know that," Morgan muttered. "Still, he should have told me. I would have..."

"You would have stayed and spent your entire life caring for a man who may never have walked again, who was damaged inside and out." Clasping Morgan's hand in hers, Amber continued. "You see, he never knew that you would mourn him all these years, how badly his death would weigh on you. He kept track of you, wanted more than anything to contact you once he was stronger."

That was the part that killed her. "So then why didn't he?" Morgan cried out, tears breaking though, running down her cheeks.

Amber's expression changed from kindness to something darker. She quickly lifted her mouth and the dark look had vanished.

"He found out about you and Mike. Stephen kept tabs and told him you were with another man and then that you had become engaged. Don't be mad at Stephen either. He tried to tell you, but the timing was never right."

She thought back to the scene in the restaurant, her conversation with him on the phone. My God, he did try to tell her. But it was years later.

As if reading her mind, Amber interrupted her thoughts. "Stephen was sworn to secrecy. He promised not to give Declan away. Right or wrong, he kept that promise, putting distance between the two of you because he couldn't bear the guilt." Amber spoke fondly of Stephen, protective over him as well.

"I don't know what to say. I mean, how can I accept all of this?" Her hands were on her head, tears flowing freely now. "I have to leave, this isn't the place for me."

"No, not before you speak with him, Morgan. The timing sucks. Declan needs you though. You of all people should understand how devastated he is over the loss of his mother, and now this."

Morgan shook her head. She was being so selfish, allowing this drama at his mother's service. But how else could she have reacted? It didn't excuse Declan's poor judgment.

"Please talk to him. Be here for him until the funeral is over, and then you can go. He needs you."

Morgan had a lot to think over. "You sound like you're a good friend to Declan." She couldn't deny that.

Amber reached over and hugged Morgan. She allowed her to stay for a while longer. It seemed she enjoyed the woman's company and she suddenly didn't like the idea of being alone.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Where the hell was Amber? She hadn't responded to any of Declan's calls or texts. Knowing the woman, he was pretty sure she had found Morgan. He could only imagine the conversation between the two women.

Morgan hadn't taken the news well, but what did he expect? It was killing him that he had to deal with this and his mother's passing at the same time. Declan considered himself to be a strong man, but this situation was sure to challenge even a man like Tach. It was too much to bear. He couldn't erase her image from his mind. Morgan was still impossibly beautiful but there was a haunted look in her eyes, and she was a bit thinner than he remembered.

The ringer of his cell made him jump in his seat. It was Amber. "Amber! What happened? Where are you?"

"Now just relax for a second. I saw her," Amber began only to be interrupted by him.

"Where? Where is she? Please, Amber, I need to find her." He was a desperate man. Not that it needed to be confirmed, but he was every bit as much in love with Morgan as before.

"Okay, so I spoke with her for over an hour, Declan. She's beyond hurt."

"Amber! I'm losing patience. Tell me where she is!"

Amber could seriously drive him crazy sometimes. He could hear the sound of a man's voice in the background, instructing her to tell him. Was that Stephen's voice? What was Stephen doing there with Amber? He couldn't even begin to wrap his brain around that situation right now. He needed one thing only, besides air to breathe, he needed Morgan.

"Geez. She's at the Turtle Motel on Seaside Highway. Now, Declan, listen..."

"What's the room number, Amber? Tell me!"

"It's room number eight, but Declan..."

He knew the motel, it was where the sea turtle hospital was; he had visited once about a year ago. Pressing the END button on his cell, he flew out the door to the best of his ability, which was pretty fast by his standards.

Praying silently, he gripped the steering wheel of Stephen's rental car for the course of the fifteen-minute ride. He thought about what to say to Morgan. What did one say in a situation such as this? There was no set of rules as far as he was concerned; he would speak from the heart and take it from there. In the back of his mind, he knew that his Morgan was really not his anymore; she was engaged to be married any day now.

The parking lot was before him. Scanning the room numbers, he quickly found room number eight and parked as close as he could get. His heart hammered in his chest, making it difficult to breathe.

Pounding on the door, he held his breath. One, two, three... he released his breath just as the door opened. Before his eyes stood Morgan. She was so breathtaking that it hurt. Did he see anger in her eyes or was it sadness? Slowly, her gaze softened just a bit, as she stepped to the side.

"I guess you're going to come in anyway, so I might as well let you in." Morgan sighed heavily.

How could anyone be so beautiful? At one time he had been afraid that he would forget what she looked like. Standing before him now, she was even more precious than he recalled. The sound of her voice was raspy, as if she had been crying.

Morgan led the way to the small table, sitting first, her eyes glued to his leg.

She was the first to speak. "What happened?" She nodded as she gazed at his leg.

He knew this conversation would need to take place, but he didn't want to bring her down with the gory details.

"There was an explosion."

He shut his eyes, tight, remembering the unwelcome memory, something he didn't consciously allow himself to think about anymore. Speaking aloud about that day brought it all back. He remembered everything — from the smell of gunpowder and the sweat dripping down his back, to the sight of the man he had shot. Sean's voice echoed through his mind, calling for him, warning him moments too late.

From the corner of his eye he saw it coming, but it was in slow motion. His body seemed to freeze, his legs full of lead, not moving. He couldn't remember if he heard or felt it first. The explosion was all heat, burning him. It was hot, hotter than he could have ever imagined, then it was nothing. He went blank until that day he had woken up in the hospital.

"Oh my God, Declan." Morgan seemed to forget about her anger momentarily, for she closed the distance between them and held him close.

He could smell her, that fresh smell of her hair, the powdery scent of the same perfume she had worn all those years ago. It seemed as if no time had gone by, like sitting right before him she was still his girl, almost his wife.

"Morgan," he groaned, turning away.

He had lost the only thing that mattered to him besides his mother; how could this have happened? If he had the chance he swore that he would re-write the past. If only some magical spell could be cast, allowing him to start again from that moment when he awoke at the hospital. But this wasn't a fairy tale and fate had played a cruel trick on him; he couldn't get out of his own way until it was too late.

"Shh, Declan, I'm here." Morgan's gaze slid once more to his leg; he blushed fiercely.

It had never occurred to him that he would ever have to show her. Carefully, he pulled his pant leg up until he reached where his leg was cut off, right below the kneecap. Her hands flew to her mouth and she cried out, not from disgust or terror, but from sympathy for him.

"Declan! No! I'm so sorry."

He could see her mind spinning, no doubt she was thinking about how much he used to love running, how energetic he had once been. His own mind flashed to ground zero, when he was bending, lifting, sweating. He flashed to basic training, training for The National Guard. He would never be able to keep up with those physical demands again.

"Morgan, I don't want you to be sad for me. I'm okay. I've learned to live with it and even enjoy my life now. I've even met some pretty good friends along the way."

Her eyes crinkled through the tears.

"My buddy Tach, he helped me through this. Without him I don't know if I could have survived. The thick-headed man wouldn't give up on me."

"I never doubted that you could survive. You've always been such a brave, strong man. I just wish that I could have been there for you, helped you through those dark days."

He was glad that she hadn't, honestly. It was a dark, dark place— one that he didn't let his mind return to often these days.

"I made it and so did you."

His statement stilled the air between them. It was the wrong thing to say; he could see that she was thinking of the past few years, probably even her new fiancé.

"Declan. What now?"

_What now?_ was a question that had been on his mind from that moment he saw her at the service. She wasn't his anymore. As much as it would kill him, he would have to let her go. The notion that they would remain close friends was foolish; they both had to know it wouldn't be possible, not now.

"We have these next few days, and then you'll go back to New York."

It was such a sad statement. Morgan cocked her head to the side as if she didn't understand, but she had to know.

"How can we get through this? I... I don't even know what to do about you, sitting here in front of me, like a dream," Morgan cried, touching his cheek tenderly.

He moved closer, feeling the heat between them. He could just lean a little closer, but he shouldn't. She closed the space, gazing into his eyes.

"Morgan."

He wasn't in control of his own body, his own actions. Their lips met, slowly at first, a sad reunion, until their chemistry kicked in, chemistry that had been hidden, forced away for so long. His body responded to hers; he was tangled up in Morgan, only Morgan. The heat intensified until it was Morgan that finally pulled away, appearing devastated.

"Oh my... I shouldn't have done that," she whispered, her mouth open in shock of what had just transpired between them.

The kiss felt so right, so natural. If she hadn't stopped, it would have led elsewhere. He wouldn't have stopped.

"It's okay, baby."

"Baby? But, Declan this is all wrong. I'm... engaged to another man."

She was on her feet, pacing the floor.

"How can this be? How can I still be in love with you and love him too?"

He knew that she didn't expect an answer from him; she was thinking aloud. He sat back, taking in the agony and confusion until he could stand it no more.

"Stop it." He was on his feet, moving toward her. "You and I did nothing wrong. I love you, Morgan. I love you more than ever. It's not wrong."

"Yes, it's very wrong." She looked up into his eyes, shaking her head over and over. "I should leave. Damn you, Declan. I should leave but I can't."

He tilted her head up and kissed her once more, this time rougher, more demanding.

"Stay with me, Morgan. Give me these few days," he begged through their passion.

She stopped to look up at him and covered his mouth with hers once again.

He stayed the night, but they only held each other close. She knew that she was still being dishonest with Mike, but at the moment she was helpless to do anything but be at Declan's side.

Today was the last service and tomorrow would be his mom's funeral. After that, she would have to get back to reality, she supposed. Mike had been calling non-stop, almost making a nuisance of himself. It was probably just because of the guilt she felt, but his calls were irritating her.

Morgan pretended that she was still upset with Declan, filling up the phone line with one lie after another by telling Mike she hadn't seen him again and that she wasn't planning on it. Mike seemed thrilled to hear that news, of course.

Mike was anxious to know why she was still in Florida. Morgan supposed she was becoming talented at telling him lies; she said it was too much of a hassle to switch her flight and that she was enjoying some quiet rest and relaxation time. She had no idea how she was going to leave Declan in the next few days. They clung to each other and if anything, seemed closer than they had been all those years ago.

What were her feelings about Mike right now? Truth be told, she did love him, but now that she was once again experiencing love with Declan, she knew deep inside that her love with Mike was comfortable, happy even, but her soul mate was lying beside her. She certainly had a dilemma on her hands, but she and Declan had agreed not to waste any of their precious time together and that at the end of her stay, they could discuss reality.

How could this possibly work? Her life and commitments were in New York; Declan's life was here in Florida. Morgan considered herself to be a person who followed through on her commitments. She had promised Mike her hand in marriage, made a commitment to the man. The invitations were sent, the catering hall booked, and her honeymoon was set, but when she pictured herself leaving Declan, she couldn't stand the image and the feelings it provoked.

"What are you thinking about?" Declan kissed the top of her nose.

"Good morning." Morgan kissed him right back, cuddling close to him.

She wanted him more than she could believe; it was so excruciating, lying here next to him, holding him at arm's length physically. Emotionally, they were back to being as close as two people could be. This was killing her.

"I asked what you were thinking about," Declan repeated while running his hand down the length of her arm.

She studied his arms in the early morning light. The scars were faded, but still told a story. If only she could have talked him out of going to Afghanistan all those years ago. Where would they be now? Married for sure, but would there be children? She was sure that there would have been. Maybe a little guy that looked just like his dad, or a girl who looked up to her daddy, thinking he was a hero. Declan was certainly a hero in her eyes. He was the most heroic man she had ever known.

"I'm thinking where we would be right now if..." She let her words fade away; they both knew exactly what she was thinking.

"We would be the happiest couple alive, maybe even bickering over who took the garbage out last or whose turn it is to do the dishes." He chuckled, playing with her hair now.

Somehow that sounded like heaven to her and she abruptly wiped a tear away.

"Hey, hey. Don't do that." He kissed the tip of her nose, his mouth wandered, now finding her lips. She could feel herself melting in his embrace.

"Declan."

They were laying together, in the same bed, the chemistry between them amazing. She had to stop this. Sitting up, she drew the blankets around herself. Declan stiffened, clearly disappointed.

"Morgan, what are we going to do here? This is crazy. It's not wrong. We loved each other so long ago, still love each other."

"Declan, you promised. You swore you wouldn't pressure me."

That seemed to give him pause.

"Fair enough. Just answer this one question, will you?" He turned her face toward his with his large hands. "Do you love him more than me?"

What kind of question was that? "That's not fair!" she cried out, jumping out of bed, clad only in her t-shirt and underwear.

"Answer me," he demanded. "Answer me." His voice was louder.

"No, I won't." She crossed her arms in front of her chest, acting like a stubborn child.

"Look at you. Just look at you. You love me more, otherwise you would just answer me." A grin started playing on his lips.

"I want you out of here, Declan Blake!" she yelled, her finger pointing at the door.

His smile never left his face. "Same old Morgan. Hey, this feels good though — our little fights. The best thing I remember is how nice it was to make-up." He winked at her.

He had some nerve! Throwing a pillow at him, she yelled. "Out!"

He reached beside the bed for his prosthetic limb as his laughter escaped. With a huff he pushed the prosthetic in place, then grabbed his pants and threw on his shirt. "I'll see you in a little while."

He ducked and hurried to the door as she went to grab another pillow. He knew her far too well. Of course she would be there for him at the service and of course she loved him more.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Morgan walked through the door looking as stunning as ever. Declan would never be able to get enough of her. What he needed to figure out now was how he was going to hold onto her. Judging from her actions over the past day, he knew that she was still in love with him. If he didn't believe it, he would leave her alone to her fiancé. Morgan's happiness was his main priority.

The timing was very interesting; he got to thinking about an intriguing theory. This would be just like his mother to play matchmaker, even from heaven. He liked to believe that his mother had something to do with bringing them back to each other; in his heart he was sure of it. His mom gave them that little push, and they would have to figure it out from there.

Raw emotions had taken hold of him these past few days. From losing his mother, to finding Morgan, he was a mess. Today was the last service and tomorrow he would be a wreck at the funeral, but he was at peace knowing that his mother was now at peace herself and most likely back to her old ways, with her health and maybe even lost youth. Having Morgan by his side would ease the pain, just knowing how much she had also loved his mom.

"She is something. I'll give you that," Tach stated as Morgan approached.

His friend had called him several times yesterday, leaving messages wanting to find out what had happened between the two and if he was okay.

"Yes, she is, isn't she?" He took pride in knowing that once upon a time, she was his girl. If only she could still be, then he would feel complete.

"What are you going to do?" Tach whispered, as Morgan drew closer.

"I have no idea," Declan breathed, his chest pounding at the sight of her.

"Glad to see you here," Declan greeted Morgan.

Morgan smiled politely, giving Tach a small peck on the cheek. Tach's eyes widened.

"I wanted to say thank you for taking care of this guy here. I heard you had a lot to do with getting him back on his feet."

"He's one of kind. And you're welcome." Tach squeezed Morgan's hand, maintaining eye contact with her.

"Well, if you'll excuse me." Morgan slipped away, heading over toward Amber and Stephen.

Declan watched her approach his friends and sighed. What was going on between Amber and Stephen anyway? He made a mental note to speak with Stephen to confirm whether or not his suspicions about his friends were true.

Right now, he had to circulate, make his rounds with his family. Somehow all the drama on the outskirts of these past few days had helped to ease his pain and keep his mind busy instead of focused on his mother's death. Maybe his mom was playing matchmaker again with Stephen and Amber, you never knew.

The day went by quickly and he had a few hours to kill before he needed to be back here again in the evening. Declan wanted to swing by his house with Morgan and have her meet his dog. Morgan would fall in love with the boxer, just as he had.

Morgan was due to head back the evening after the funeral; he didn't have a lot of time left with her. Declan's mind was running in a million different directions with all that he wanted to do before she left. He needed a plan; he needed to make his last night with her count. He had already arranged for them to have a quiet dinner with Stephen and Amber after the service tonight. His mind was now fitting all the pieces of the puzzle together for the following night. He was devising a plan and it just had to work.

As expected, Morgan fell in love with D at first sight. Declan couldn't get enough of watching Morgan interact with his dog. If only Morgan would just realize that everything she needed was right in front of her. He would move back home if he had to, if her job and family were holding her back. But he knew who was holding her back, and that was the problem.

Knowing his Morgan, she wouldn't want to break her promises, wouldn't want to let Mike down in front of all their friends and family. He didn't like the guy. It wasn't just because he was Morgan's fiancé; he had other reasons. Stephen had told him that he'd picked up on a negative vibe when he had met the man that night at the restaurant.

"She's perfect." Morgan grinned from ear to ear, kneeling down to pet D, who responded with wet, sloppy kisses all over her face.

Declan laughed heartily, his insides warm. He turned to make some coffee; there was a long night ahead as they still had the evening service to attend. Morgan was beside him, touching his elbow softly.

"Declan?" she inquired carefully. "Where are they?"

Declan had no idea what she was talking about.

"What did you say?"

She was speaking toward his deaf ear. Morgan blushed, as if suddenly remembering about his hearing loss.

"I was asking where Stephen is." Her face registered concern. Still holding onto his arm, she traced his scars lovingly.

"Your guess is as good as mine, but I'm pretty sure I have an idea _who_ he's with."

Just as Declan finished speaking, Stephen and Amber walked through the door, smiling. It was what he had figured. Life had a very funny way of working out. In his heart, he had always known there was a reason he had met Amber. Yes, she was his good friend, but perhaps she was meant to be with Stephen for the long run. Amber caught his eye and he winked at her.

"Hey guys." Amber graced them with her smile.

Morgan was by her side, embracing her warmly. Seeing the two women get along sat well with Declan. He needed to speak with Stephen, about several things.

_An ice-cold beer would be heaven in this heat._ Figuring he had about an hour before he was due back to get ready for the evening, he asked his buddy if he wanted to grab a beer. As much as it hurt him to be away from Morgan for even an hour, he wanted to run his plan by his friend and see what was up with him and Amber.

Amber took hold of Morgan's arm, causing Morgan to giggle. "Oh, don't worry about us; I'm sure we'll find something to do to pass the time."

D barked happily, witnessing the exchange between them. Knowing that Morgan was in good hands, he kissed her goodbye on the mouth. Stephen and Amber stared with mouths wide open as the couple said their goodbyes. As soon as his front door was closed, Stephen turned to face his friend in the Florida heat.

"Man, are you in trouble."

"Tell me something I don't know," Declan muttered.

"What the hell was that?" Amber's mouth was still agape, her eyes searching Morgan's face for answers.

Was it shock, anger, or happiness that Morgan saw staring back at her? She hadn't planned for that kiss to happen in front of Declan's friends. It was odd; they were carrying on as if they were a couple again. It felt funny, strange.

"I... I don't really know."

Amber puffed out her chest, her eyes squinting slightly. "I like you, Morgan, I do, but you need to tread carefully here. That man is crazy in love with you. Don't you dare hurt him," Amber threatened.

Morgan was finding that Declan's friend was loyal, but upon looking closer, she wondered if Amber harbored deeper feelings for Declan.

"I wouldn't intentionally hurt that man for the world, Amber, but in case you aren't aware, it's a very precarious situation that Declan and I have found ourselves in," Morgan explained.

"I'm aware of that, and it sucks, but don't hurt him or—"

Cutting off Amber mid-sentence, Morgan was slightly irritated at this little ray of sunshine. "Or what?" Placing her hand firmly on her hip, Morgan stood her ground. "Can I ask you something, Amber?"

Amber nodded, placing her arms across her chest. D was sitting beside them, whining.

"Are _you_ in love with him?" The look on Amber's face said it all. God, of course she was, it was crystal clear.

"That's not relevant, and no, I'm not." Amber pouted, her eyes on the floor.

"Oh my God, you are. You are!" Morgan yelled, causing D to whine louder and spring to her feet.

"It's complicated. I can explain."

"Try me."

Gazing down at Amber's small stature, Morgan was pissed. This woman was playing the role of friend while she secretly harbored a crush on her Declan. _Her_ Declan, well, that was yesterday, but he still felt like hers.

Amber's shoulders slumped and she took Morgan by the hand. Whistling for D, Amber clipped the leash that was hanging by the door on D. It bothered her to see how familiar Amber was here, in Declan's house.

"Let's go for a walk," Amber ordered, leaving Morgan no choice but to follow her out the door.

She sure was bossy. With a huff, Morgan followed Amber's lead, one step behind until they reached the quiet street ahead. Morgan had no idea what this woman would say to her, but she could see the set look of determination in her eyes.

"So, I met Declan when he came into the shelter looking for a dog. We became friends and yes, I wanted something more."

"I figured that," Morgan quipped, struggling to keep up with Amber's pace.

"He's a catch. You should know that."

As if she didn't know that already. "Go on," Morgan urged.

"So basically, he told me that his heart was taken, by someone else. At first I didn't get it. I thought you had dumped him because of his disabilities, but later, he told me the truth." Amber spun to face her, her eyes serious.

"And now? How do you feel about him now?" Morgan needed to know.

" _Now,_ now I understand and still have feelings of deep friendship, but I get it."

_Oh_. Morgan didn't quite know what to make of Amber's confession. Was Amber still in love with him? Did it even matter? It had seemed that she and Stephen were becoming close, so Morgan decided to switch the subject to one that she felt less threatened by. "And how do you feel about Stephen?"

Amber's cheeks turned a deep pink. She supposed that was answer enough. Relief coursed through Morgan's body.

"I... I guess I like him. It's weird, you know, I've only just met him, but it seems we have a connection of sorts." Amber glanced up at Morgan, seeking understanding.

Morgan could see that the couple was hitting it off but knew once Stephen returned home, their feelings may very well change for one another.

"It's not that odd, Stephen's a good guy. Declan seems to think you're a good friend, so maybe it's not that strange after all."

"Hmm. Do you love your fiancé?" Amber's directness didn't shock Morgan.

It wasn't an easy question to answer. Once, not so long ago, she would have sworn that she did. Now? She loved him, but was she _in love_ with him now that Declan was here? "I don't know, Amber. I thought I did, but..."

"But Declan's back," Amber finished her sentence for her.

Nodding her head rapidly, Morgan felt her tears build. The warmth of Amber's touch soothed her. Amber squeezed her hand.

"Morgan, look at me."

Morgan complied, tears shining.

"This is probably the hardest thing you're ever going to have to do."

No, the hardest thing she ever had to do was live without Declan for all those years. As difficult as this decision would be, she had already gone through hell and back. Somehow, it could be harder though, staying away, knowing that Declan was alive down here in Florida.

"Oh, I don't know how I'm going to leave him," Morgan fumbled through tears.

"Then don't. Don't leave him. It will kill him," Amber stated, squeezing Morgan's hand harder. "It will kill him now that he's connected with you again."

This woman would most likely hate her for what she needed to do. It was sad because she was starting to feel a real bond with Amber.

"Please don't hate me for what I need to do, Amber."

Amber tore her hand away and walked back to Declan's place. It was already happening; Amber's posture was stiff as she made her way to Declan's front door. She opened it, unclipped D's leash, and stood to face Morgan.

"I can't stay here with you any longer and witness you tearing his heart right out of him."

One thing would be certain, Morgan thought to herself. Declan would have a good friend when she left him here, a loyal friend who would move heaven and earth for him. There was some peace in knowing that.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Before he and Morgan headed out to the service, Declan had received an urgent text from Amber asking, no actually _telling,_ him to call her immediately. He had a feeling that it wasn't good.

Upon calling her, she filled his ear with pleas to stay away from Morgan, that she was planning on leaving in the next day or so. This wasn't news to him and part of him, although flattered that she would care, was growing frustrated with her. Unless Amber was in Morgan's shoes, she had no way of knowing how she would react, what she would do in her place.

Dinner tonight was going to be interesting; he could just picture Amber shooting daggers at Morgan from across the table.

The service was longer than last night, it seemed. This was the last night that visitors would pay their respects. He was going to miss his mother so much. No more trips to the nursing home to see her, though he knew lately she had no idea who he even was.

As a small boy, he couldn't have asked for a mom that was more fun, playful, or energetic. His mom would just hop right onto his sled, hollering as they plowed down the snowy hills. At the beach, she was alongside him, taking the waves in, and at the amusement park shouting while they rode countless rides together. He and his dad had been close enough, he supposed, but they had never shared that same bond as he did with his mother. Declan and his mom had grown closer as a result of his dad's stroke. Over the years they had grown to rely on one another for company and support.

Teen years had brought challenging times, such as when he pushed the limit by breaking his very fair curfew and trying alcohol with his buddies before he was of age. His mom had been firm, but fair. The punishment had always fit the crime, like the time he and Stephen had come home two hours late and then passed out cold. The memory of his mother surfaced, he could almost see her standing there with the house phone at her ear, politely informing Stephen's mother about what had happened and also telling her that Declan would be staying home for the next week.

Adulthood bonded them once more, as his mom became more of a friend, a sounding board for advice and just good conversation. Recalling those years when he took his mom out to breakfast each Sunday brought fresh tears to his eyes. Morgan had started joining them when the couple became serious, fitting right in, making his mom laugh non-stop with her silly childhood stories. He needed to remember that his mother was better off now; that was the only thing that kept him going.

They were now settled in at the restaurant, a popular local steakhouse. Amber and Stephen were getting along famously, which begged the question, was this going to be some kind of fling or would they pursue this as a long-distance relationship? Declan hoped the latter would be true — both of his friends deserved to be happy.

Declan's hand found Morgan's thigh under the table and she grinned widely, placing her own hand on top of his. Amber had relaxed, steering away from speaking with Morgan, but at least she wasn't pouting. The conversation mostly revolved around stories of Mrs. Blake — from memories of childhood to more recent times, in which Morgan contributed to the conversation heartily.

"Oh my gosh, Declan, remember that time your mom pulled out all the old photo albums?"

Blushing slightly, he recalled the old photos of him nude in the bathtub, getting into a huge mud puddle, posing on Santa's lap, and more.

"Amber, this must be hard for you not to have known Mrs. Blake. She would have loved you," Morgan offered kindly.

It was just like Morgan to step up and include Amber, throwing the tension out of the room. Amber smiled politely, nodding a silent thank you.

Squeezing Morgan's thigh, he whispered in her ear, "I love you."

Morgan turned, her mouth hanging open, her eyes wide. She didn't say anything in response, but he had gotten a reaction out of her, and that was good enough for now. Before he could say anything else, her cell phone rang sharply, breaking the mood.

She glanced at the screen, frowning. "If you'll excuse me."

As Morgan stood to make her way outside to take her call, it took everything he had not to follow her. Most likely, it was Mike on the phone. The plan he had set up for tomorrow night was perfect; if it didn't work then he was helpless. Helpless to do anything but let her go.

"Declan, for what it's worth, she's worth fighting for," Amber blurted out.

That was a lot for Amber to offer, and Declan appreciated it.

"Yes, she is. And thank you," Declan responded quietly.

"I'm sorry for what I said before. I just don't want you to get hurt. Stephen's been filling me in on Morgan's life the past few years, and I know it couldn't have been easy for her."

"Amber, if I give up or not, I'll still be hurt if she goes with Mike. I have to try."

"I know, Declan, I know," Amber muttered, taking his hand in hers from across the table.

In awe, Declan watched closely as Stephen placed a delicate kiss on top of Amber's head. He was floored. Of course he knew that the two shared an attraction, but it must be more than just a passing thing by the look on Stephen's face.

"I don't even know what to say, I mean, you guys seem like you would be great together," Declan exclaimed.

"Excuse me," Amber interjected. "I'm going to check on Morgan. She's been gone a while."

The men watched Amber head for the door.

"We don't know quite what to make of it either. We're going to try to stay in touch, take it slow, see where it will go," Stephen stated.

"She's a good girl. Be gentle with her," Declan ordered, half joking.

"No worries, man. I really like her."

Side by side Morgan and Amber approached the table. Witnessing his two favorite women together, his heart soared. Why couldn't it stay this way?

"Everything okay?" Declan asked once Morgan had returned to his side.

She gazed at him, nodding her head, and then focused her attention on placing her napkin on her lap.

Everything _wasn't_ okay, that much was clear.

Back at the hotel, they lay together on the bed snuggling.

Declan knew her too well; that had always b een a problem. Now, it was no different. He felt like a lifeline, one that Morgan was terrified of losing. She didn't want to let go.

Mike had called when they were out earlier with Stephen and Amber. It broke her heart to hear Mike so upbeat, so full of happiness that she would be returning soon.

Part of her loved Mike, but a bigger part loved Declan. Who was she kidding? Declan had always occupied more space in her heart, even when she thought he was dead. Now that he was alive, her heart exploded for him, but she would have a hard time letting go of Mike, for he had been there for her, tried so hard to make her happy for the past couple of years. Facing her was a decision of the worst kind. No matter what she decided, a good man would be hurt, let down by her.

Amber was coming around now and it felt good to have a friend here. When she had first found that Declan was alive, she had wanted to call Elle and fill her in, knowing instinctively that Elle would forgive Declan for his foolish scheme, but right now it would have to wait, her mind needed rest.

Knowing Elle, she would scream for Morgan to run back into Declan's arms, she'd always liked them together. It still bothered her that Elle's feelings about Mike had changed. Elle was biased; it would be difficult to get a sound opinion from someone whose scales were not balanced when it came to Mike.

Amber, although completely on Declan's side, could listen objectively and offer her some sound advice on her feelings about her relationship with Mike. Morgan now knew that regardless of the outcome, Amber would understand and respect her decision.

"Kiss me, beautiful lady," Declan tore her from her deep, troubled thoughts, making her heart lighter instantly. She obliged, giving herself over to the sweet sensation of him. Declan responded by pulling her closer to his body, she could smell him, taste the faint smell of wine from the restaurant, still on his lips.

"Declan, stop," she cried out, tearing herself away from him.

She had to be crazy, thinking either of them could spend the night again, not loving each other. He groaned his disappointment, turning over so that his back was to her.

"Oh, stop it. You're acting like a baby now," she teased, running the tip of her finger over his back. Declan stood his ground until her hand reached to turn his face toward her.

"What am I doing?" she breathed, as he kissed her collarbone, slowly reaching her chin, then once again, devouring her mouth with his touch.

They were hopeless; she should have known how impossible it would be for them to stay apart. It didn't feel wrong as she wrapped her arms around him and surrendered to his touch. They were in trouble.

"I love you too," Morgan cried, tears falling softly through their kiss.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

From the moment she woke up that morning, she knew what she had to do. It was her last full day in Florida and as awful as the funeral would be, leaving Declan's side tomorrow would tear her apart as well. Declan claimed he had a special evening planned for them tonight and he told her to pack a small overnight bag. Just what was he up to?

It had been so hard to untangle her emotions on this trip; she was up, down, and everywhere in between. Declan must have felt the same, with the loss of his mother and the reawakening of their relationship; she just wished the timing had been better for him.

Mrs. Blake had always had such a gift for matchmaking and was a true romantic; Morgan wouldn't be the least bit surprised to know that she was scheming from above. _You troublemaker, you,_ Morgan silently teased, but her heart filled with warmth at the very thought.

She was by his side every moment, from the tears to the laughter as Declan said goodbye to his mother that day. Watching him, she couldn't bear for him to have his heart broken twice. It was becoming easier for her to decide what she needed to do.

The car ride was comfortably silent for the most part. Morgan felt that Declan needed some quiet since his day had been very difficult. Morgan also needed some time to sort through her guilty feelings regarding her actions with Declan.

Mike would never understand, nor did she expect him to. How could such a love, one that connected her very soul to Declan's, be considered wrong? That wasn't what was wrong and she knew it. She needed to set things straight and she intended to do just that when she returned home. In the back of her mind, she was trying to work out her job responsibilities and Declan's own ties to Florida. How would they even make this work?

"We're almost there," Declan winked as he set his eyes back on the road ahead. They had driven nearly two hours north, and this area of Florida was starting to look vaguely familiar for some reason. Maybe it was just the landscape, it was so similar across this section of the state. As they pulled into the motel parking lot, Morgan nearly choked.

"Oh my God, Declan!" Her seatbelt was off in an instant. "Oh my God!" She delighted in seeing the expression on his face.

"Yup," he shrugged, unable to mask his grin.

He had taken her back to their special place, the one that they had visited so many years ago, on one of his last nights before he was deployed. She ran straight into his arms, basking in the salty ocean air.

"Can we go to the pier?" Morgan felt like a fidgety child, she could hardly contain herself.

"Of course. That's part of the plan."

"The way I see it is that we have just enough time to head inside to relax before showering and heading out," Morgan winked.

"Oh, I seriously doubt there'll be any relaxing," he chided.

But then his smile slowly faded as she watched Declan's eyes focus on her engagement ring. It would be useless to try to hide it, but she slipped her hand by her side for the moment. Was it proper to remove it? Somehow that seemed worse.

"Come on." She pulled him toward the motel lobby so that they could check in.

She had forgotten that he couldn't keep up as quickly as he used to, so she slowed her pace for him.

The door chime rang when they entered and caused a pleasant looking older woman to look up from her newspaper.

"Welcome!"

Something about the woman made Morgan feel comfortable and safe. Returning the woman's smile, Declan gave his name as the woman looked them over, nodding her approval.

"When's the big day?" The woman's eyes were kind as she took in Morgan's engagement ring.

Turning to glance at Declan, she waited for his response. He had his head down, his deaf ear toward the woman. So he hadn't heard. That was a small blessing.

The silence must have tipped him off that he had missed something. He cocked his head to the side, grinning. "What was that?"

Morgan tried to reach the woman with an unspoken message. _Please don't repeat that. Please don't._

"It was nothing, honey. Come on, let's grab our bags." Morgan nodded at the woman who now looked her over with scrunched brows and a disapproving line set on her mouth.

There wasn't much relaxing that had taken place, as Morgan couldn't get enough of him. It was as if she had to make up for every single day that they had been apart all at once.

She planned on surprising him tonight with her news. The more she thought about it, the more she knew she could never be apart from him ever again. Whatever cruel trick fate had played in keeping them apart before, she felt was now pushing them together again for a reason. It was fate, it was meant to be. Even Declan, who once scoffed at her feelings regarding fate and destiny would be hard pressed to disagree.

The night was breezy, not unlike the last time they stood here, nearly four years ago, at this very pier, taking in the amusement rides. Country music filled the air and she was in the mood to dance, slow dance, fast dance, whatever. Gazing up at Declan, she knew that she was making the right decision.

"What do you want to do first?" Declan spread his arms out, taking in the pier and all of its attractions.

"I want to dance," she blurted. He squinted at her, trying to conceal the grin that was now spreading over his face.

"Dance? Okay, I think we could do that."

"Let's go over towards the rides. I hear music playing." She was so excited she could barely contain her emotions.

"No, I have a better idea."

He led her down to the darkest section of the pier, completely isolated and close to the ocean. Fumbling in his pocket, he produced his cell phone.

"What are you doing?" she wondered aloud as she watched him flip though his phone, searching.

"Ah, here it is."

Suddenly, Declan's eyes grew serious as he placed his cell on the damp wood railing. At first she didn't recognize the tune, it had been so long, then the pieces of the puzzle fit together. It had been ages since she had allowed herself to listen to this song. _Someone like you..._

"Come here, my lady, and dance with me."

Declan bowed properly, as if he were a gentleman courting a lady with a first dance. Cautiously she approached, afraid to ruin the moment. This was _their song,_ the one that was to become their wedding song so long ago. She remembered dancing with him before; this time she led as his leg fumbled a bit. She loved every bit of him, more with each passing day. " _I won't cry, I don't want to dampen the magical mood."_

His eyes bored into hers, glistening.

"Oh, Declan," she sighed.

"Hush," he ordered softly, before pulling her in, placing his soft mouth on hers.

Neither said a word, just listened to the sound of the music, _their song,_ the lyrics and the sound of their heartbeats blending as one.

When the song ended, she didn't want to pry herself away from him; she was pinned to his side until he spoke.

"I have somewhere I'd like to take you," he whispered into her ear.

The Ferris wheel, it had to be. This pier had played itself out so many times in her dreams. It was surreal, just standing here with him now. Like two kids, they made their way over to the amusement area.

"Are you hungry?"

The scent of fresh popcorn filled the air and she was suddenly ravenous. "Want to share a popcorn and then we'll grab something for dinner after?"

"You bet," Declan stated, pulling her over to the snack stand to order.

The buttered popcorn melted in her mouth, her senses on high alert. She and Declan shared the bag as they made their way to the Ferris wheel. They settled onto the unsteady seat, clutching hands.

"Do you remember when you were afraid of this old thing?" Declan began, speaking slowly.

She nodded, recalling that at the time she had been more afraid of losing him to Afghanistan.

"Well, last time, in this very spot, I helped you to overcome your fears. Now, Morgan, I want to help you again." His voice wasn't cocky, far from it. His voice quivered, shaking slightly. "Morgan, what you're doing, what _we're_ doing is right, you should know that. Don't be afraid to follow your heart. If you don't want me, I won't be angry, but I think you do. I think you love me."

What else could she do but nod in agreement? He knew her so well; they fit together like old gloves.

"I do love you, Declan, so very much." Morgan had never been more certain of anything.

"Morgan, I would be the happiest man alive if you would fulfill my destiny, stay with me, and marry me."

_Marry me? Did he just mention destiny? Declan, the nonbeliever in such nonsense?_ She swallowed hard, blinking and reaching over to touch his face to make sure this wasn't a dream.

"I will stay and even marry you, Declan, like I was meant to all those years ago."

Right now it didn't matter when, it didn't matter if she was indeed, still technically engaged to another man and due to be married in mere days. She sealed the deal with a kiss, so full of passion, that it could only be fate, right there, working its magic right on the very top of the Ferris wheel.

How was she going to tell Mike? Harsh reality was slapping her in the face, now that her perfect night with Declan was over. It didn't help that she had powered down her cell phone last night and now Mike's numerous edgy messages had all come streaming through at once.

Where are you?

Call me.

What are you doing?

Now I'm worried.

I'm getting really upset.

Call me.

Call me.

Call me...

Did she agree to marry Declan last night? What had she been thinking? Of course, eventually she would marry Declan, but to discuss this now, when she was still engaged to another man? Yes, it must have been destiny, or perhaps Mrs. Blake had a part in last night's magic on top of that Ferris wheel, making reality seem like a faraway joke. It wasn't that far away now. She frowned.

"You okay?" Declan glanced at her for a moment, his face lined with concern.

Nodding in response, she was at a loss for words.

"Sweetheart, it's all going to work out, I promise you," Declan rubbed her thigh gently. "Do you want me to come home with you? I can be there for you."

God, she could just imagine that — Declan and Mike together in the same room...

"There you go again. You look like you're going to cry," Declan stated softly, running his hand through her hair. "Do you remember the things we said to each other last night? The promises we made?"

Of course she did, how could she forget? Aside from their first night at the Ferris wheel, last night had been one of the most memorable nights of her life.

Now she felt afraid. She was afraid to tell Mike, afraid of his reaction, afraid to hear the inevitable screams, the accusations, afraid of hurting him. He wouldn't take the rejection well.

Taking in a deep breath, she gazed at Declan driving. It was their last few hours together; she had nothing but time on her hands to think about this on the plane ride home, so she figured it was silly to waste this time now agonizing over her quandary. Reaching for Declan's hand, she attempted to brighten the mood.

"Yes, I'm sorry, Declan. How could I forget?" She offered him one of her brightest smiles.

"I meant every single word. You can hold me to it," Declan offered, his own smile bright. "Now, just relax and enjoy the ride."

The remainder of the ride back to her motel was pleasant, just two people madly in love, enjoying one another's company. Before long, they had arrived. Declan steered his truck toward an empty parking spot right next to her rental car. She unbuckled her seat belt and opened the door. Declan was at her side before she knew it. He kissed her lightly on top of her head and pulled her close, whispering for her to stay strong.

"Do you want me to come in?" Declan raised his eyebrow.

"I wish you could, but I have some packing to do and I could use a shower. Tell you what, let me take care of everything, and then I'll check out here and head back to your house before my flight tonight." Morgan's flight was an early evening one, so that gave her the day to spend with Declan.

"I can't wait." He kissed her again, softly at first, but then the intensity increased, causing Morgan to sigh deeply and kiss him like her life depended on it.

"I love you, Morgan." He finally broke their kiss, but his hand was still on her bottom, pulling her close.

"I love you, too. Now go, so I can get back to you." She swatted him playfully then grabbed her small overnight bag from the backseat. She missed him already. This was love; this was what true love was really like.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Declan's truck sped off, spewing dirt and pebbles with it. She would need to hurry in order to get back to him. A wide grin took over her face as she fumbled for her hotel key card.

She knew something was wrong before the door opened; she actually felt it in her bones. The air was filled with tension as she felt a tug on her shirt.

"Well, well. It all makes sense now, doesn't it?"

"Mike!" she stammered, clutching her chest. He had been waiting for her, outside of her hotel room, lurking just out of sight around the corner.

_Oh my, how much had he seen?_ Trying to recapture the past few minutes in her mind, images of her and Declan kissing... oh, this wasn't good.

She found it hard to catch a breath in this Florida heat. With him standing before her, she saw his tears, anger, and betrayal. What had she done? She was playing with feelings here — real people, real feelings. Fate and destiny did not look so pretty from where she stood now.

"Oh, he's such a _cruel_ person. I didn't speak to him again. I just needed some quiet time... need I go on?" Mike was gasping breaths, sobbing like she had never witnessed before.

"Mike, I didn't mean for it to happen, it just..." She didn't know what to say. Any excuse would be utterly ridiculous right now.

"The wedding, Morgan, the wedding! I have the honeymoon planned, a special suite for just the two of us, our friends are all coming. Our wedding is taking place in three days, Morgan! Three days!"

She couldn't even attempt to speak at this point. This was a conversation that should be continued indoors. "Come inside, Mike."

She led the way into her room and shut the door behind them. Mike paced the floor, taking in deep breaths.

"I have always been there for you. I would never lie to you. I'm the one, Morgan, I'm the one who brought you back, made you love again after _he lied to you!"_

The constant pounding of her head brought a piercing stress headache; she only got these during times of extreme stress, like when Declan was presumed dead. But he wasn't dead, was he?

Standing before her was a good man, a man that had been there for her through thick and thin, who stood by her and true to his word, never lied to her. Her heart cried out for Declan, but she didn't want to hurt Mike. How could she reject him, like his own mother had?

"I think we should postpone the wedding," she stammered, her eyes shut tight so that she didn't have to see the hurt in his eyes.

"No," Mike stated firmly.

What did he just say? Slowly she pried her eyes open, daring to look at him.

"What?" Maybe she hadn't heard him correctly. "What did you say?"

"I said no. Morgan, we've been through worse. I'm not giving up on you now. I love you with all my heart, and I'm not giving up on this fight. If you want to leave me standing at the altar, in front of all our friends and family, that's a chance I'm willing to take."

It was strange. She had expected yelling, pounding, throwing things even, but here he was, crying, but calmly telling her that he wasn't giving up on her. Why couldn't he be an ass? A selfish ass? She didn't want to hurt either man, this was a hopeless situation.

"I came here to surprise you, Morgan. I wanted it to be romantic, something we would remember well into our married years. The shock has worn off now, and I'm not mad at you, upset yes, but I think I can forgive you for this. Declan's been manipulating you for years, playing with your fragile emotions."

Just moments ago, Morgan had stood by Declan's side, in love with the man. Her mind was made up; she was meant to be with Declan. How could she give him up, the one her heart had cried for all these years?

Fatigue coursed through her body. "Mike, I want to leave. I want to go home. I just want to go home."

"Good, Morgan, that's good. We'll go home." His eyes were hopeful.

"Mike, I can't do this. We can't get married right now. It wouldn't be fair to anyone."

"But you can't do this, Morgan, I beg you."

It hurt to see the pain in his eyes, but she needed to stop this now. "Mike, if I married you right now, I can guarantee we'd both live to regret it." She was going to tear his heart apart, but there was no other way. "I need time to sort all of this out. Declan wasn't manipulating me, he was protecting me."

"I don't want to hear this," Mike exclaimed, walking away from her. "Lies, everything that man says is a lie. How could you believe him?"

"Mike, you couldn't begin to understand this situation between Declan and me. I don't want to hurt, you. God, it's the last thing I want..."

He grabbed her hands in his. "Then don't, Morgan."

Her head throbbed; she needed some aspirin and time alone. "That's not fair, Mike. I need to go home, and I'm asking for space. Please respect that."

Silence filled the room as Mike paced back and forth, clenching his fists.

"Give me a minute," Morgan stated, heading toward the door.

He blocked her way for a moment, studying her face before stepping out of her way to give her space. Bright sunshine only intensified her headache.

Placing a call to Declan, the rings came across loud, too loud for her raw nerves.

"Hey beautiful!" Declan exclaimed.

Through tears, she explained how Mike had been there, waiting in the shadows, determined to take her back home. She could barely get the words out.

"Stay right there, Morgan, I'm on my way!"

No, she couldn't have that. That would be an awful scene.

"No, don't come, Declan. I'm leaving. I'm going home," she managed, her face a teary mess.

"No, you're not making sense. You decided that we would be together. Don't you remember last night, on the Ferris Wheel?" He was desperate, grasping, and she knew it.

It only made her anxious right now, both men pulling her in opposite directions. She was going to snap; she was ready to break.

"I need time alone to think, Declan. I feel horrible; I was supposed to marry him in a few days!"

Silence filled the line and she pictured Declan, his mouth set in a firm, unyielding line. They had fought so many times before, but this time there was finality in the air. Through her wracking sobs, she waited for him, waited for him to say anything.

"Declan?" She wasn't even sure he was still on the line. "Declan?"

"I'm here."

Finally.

"Morgan, I'll fight to the death for a woman who wants me, but you see, I have to be sure that you want me. I thought you were sure, but now? I'll be here for you, but I'm not going to beg. I'm not a begging man."

She had heard him use those words before; it brought back times of them together. His voice was so calm and clear right now, like he had removed himself from the situation. Declan could be cold at times, but she knew it was his defense mechanism. Bottom line, Declan had a heart of gold.

"I have to go." She nearly choked on her words as she gently pressed the button to end the call.

Within seconds, Mike was beside her. He stood there, just staring at her.

"I love you, you know."

She didn't want to hear that right now, it was killing her. This was all her fault. If she wasn't over Declan all those years ago, she should have never pushed it; she should have taken more time to be on her own. Now look at the situation she had on her hands.

"Did you hear me?"

He came even closer. Morgan cringed, wanting to crawl up in a ball, just to be by herself.

"Please." Morgan closed her eyes, waving him back with her hand. "I've had a really tough last couple of days, I need some space."

"From where I'm sitting, it didn't appear to be that tough at all." Mike sneered.

She would not engage, nope, she wouldn't take the bait.

"I can't so this right now. I admit what I did was wrong, to both of you." It was, it was so very wrong. On so many levels. As much as she loved Declan, she had no business being with him until she had sorted out this mess.

"Well, let's not forget that you're the victim here. Declan played you like a fiddle..."

She started to see red; he was not going to put Declan down. She wouldn't allow it. Declan wasn't some criminal here; he was a man who was dealt a really shitty hand and lacked the coping skills to handle the situation properly. As awful as it had been, Declan's behavior came from an unselfish place and she loved him for it.

"One more word, one more negative... Scratch that, one more word period, about Declan and I'm going to lose it." He was crossing boundaries and she wouldn't allow it anymore.

"Fine, fine. Let's check out and get the hell out of here," Mike blurted, staring at the wall in front of him.

Morgan wished that Stephen would be on that flight home instead of extending his stay here with Amber. She needed a buffer from Mike, and she wasn't going to get it.

She was leaving Florida behind. Last night's memories seemed like a lifetime ago.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

The flight had been long and tense. To top it all off, Declan hadn't even called. No texts, nothing. He had made it abundantly clear that he wouldn't beg. Stubbornness was not one of his endearing qualities.

This felt wrong, yes, she loved Mike, but not enough. Not enough to keep her mind from wandering to Declan a thousand times a day.

Awkwardness filled the air as Morgan grabbed her bags from the car. Mike had used a car service to drive him to the airport earlier, so they rode back to her house together, mostly in silence. He would need to leave her here, go back to his place, but he grabbed his bags, along with some of hers and headed to the front door.

"Mike, I can get my bags, it's okay."

"It's no problem, come on, let's head inside and relax for a while."

Did he not understand everything she had tried to tell him? He wasn't going to make this easy for her. "Mike, no. I need time alone to sort everything out."

"Morgan? The wedding, the honeymoon. We can't get our money back, the flight is booked."

The aspirin she had taken on the flight had worn off and her head was beginning to throb again. "Mike, the wedding is off..."

"Postponed, you said it was postponed," he stated, moving toward her.

Thoughts of their conversation flooded her mind. Damn, she had said that, but she hadn't been thinking clearly.

"Mike, don't make this harder for both of us. I'll take care of canceling everything. I think you should grab some of your things and go back to your place for now."

Tears filled his eyes and part of her wanted to reach out and hold him, the part of her that felt guilty for causing so much pain.

"Morgan, I want you to choose me. I can make you happy, give me this last chance." He pulled her into his arms and lowered his head onto hers. "Don't leave me."

Heartache consumed her as she sobbed along with him. Part of her would miss him, denying it would be useless. They had spent so much time together, even if their relationship had been strained lately, there were definitely good memories to be cherished.

"Mike, please go." She broke free from his embrace then watched from the front yard as he let himself in the house with his key.

It would be easier if she stayed out here until he had finished packing a bag for himself. Before long, he was back outside, approaching her.

"Good night, Mike. We'll talk tomorrow."

If she was acting cold, she was sorry, but she didn't see any other way. Leading him to believe everything was okay between them was crueler, in her opinion.

The slam of his car door snapped her out of her thoughts. It was going to be a long night. She had a lot of thinking to do; she had already made up her mind, it was clear, there was only one possible outcome, but her decision would cause so much pain to another. _"Oh please forgive me, Mike."_

Early the next morning, she woke. Sleep hadn't come easy to her the night before. Thoughts of Declan and Mike prevented her from getting any rest. She needed to call Declan, but she had business to attend to first.

No matter how she handled this, she was going to hurt Mike. She made some necessary phone calls, which were not pleasant, but after many hours, most of them were out of the way. Her mother had actually offered to call all the relatives on her side, which made it a lot easier for Morgan to handle.

The honeymoon situation wasn't as easy. It was too late to get a refund for the trip. Between the airfare and resort, this was going to set her back quite a bit since half of the trip had been paid for out of her bank account. Later she would sit down and figure it all out.

What she really needed right now was to hear Declan's voice. _Soon_ , she thought. For now, she needed to prepare for Mike's visit. After many texts on Mike's part, she had called him back and asked him to come over and talk. He said he would come that evening. After a stressful day attending to the cancellation of the wedding, she wanted to relax but knew she couldn't until she and Mike had a conversation.

Tea was brewing in the kitchen as she heard the knock on the door. The fact that he knocked even seemed strange right now, a result of their strained relationship. He looked exhausted and she was sure she appeared the same.

"Come on upstairs." She led the way into the kitchen. "Can I get you anything to drink, water, tea?"

"I don't want anything to drink, Morgan. I want you, I want us." His voice quivered as he faced her.

"Mike," she began, her eyes full of sorrow. "I'm so sorry."

Whoever said breaking up was easier on the person ending the relationship had never experienced the gut-wrenching pain she felt right now.

Mike stood, his eyes searching her face.

"He told you, didn't he?" It was an accusation and Morgan had no clue what Mike was talking about. His demeanor had shifted from sad to accusatory in a matter of seconds. It was throwing her off, his shift in mood.

"Mike... I don't know what you're talking about."

"He told you, of course he told you all about it. That phone call months ago. I knew he would. I knew it!" Mike smashed his hand down on the table beside them.

What on earth did he mean? What phone call? Confusion clouded her mind, trying to make sense of what Mike said. She grasped his hands.

"What phone call?"

Mike's eyes were wide. "Oh my God, he didn't tell you, did he? He really didn't tell you?" Mike pulled away from her grasp, walking around in circles.

"No he didn't, but now you're going to tell me, Mike. Tell me what is going on!" Morgan yelled, causing Mike to stop and stare at her.

"It doesn't even matter. Obviously you love him, not me. It was clear right from the start. Dreams of Declan, memories of the perfect Declan, Declan this and Declan that, Declan's ring, the letter... it was always Declan!" Mike shouted, drawing closer, his fists clenched.

Morgan had never feared for her safety with this man, but right now he looked like a maniac, his eyes wild.

"No, stop!" Morgan matched his voice with her strong one. "You know something, don't you? Declan called for me? He called _my_ house and you never told me? And there was a _letter?_ "

Her heart hammered away; she had never been so angry before in her life. He had called her; Declan had called her! It had to be what Mike was talking about.

"When? When did he call?"

_Oh my God._ All this time, these past months, he had lied to her. Mike knew that Declan was alive and he had let her suffer. Pieces of the puzzle were starting to come together — Mike driving to the upstate cabin, irritable, tense, proposing to her, losing patience more and more at the mention of Declan's name.

"Oh my... you knew when you proposed to me, didn't you?"

Silence. Mike's gaze reached the floor.

"Didn't you?" Morgan edged closer to him, ready to wring his neck.

"Yes, Morgan." It was barely a whisper.

"What did you say? Say it louder!" She felt like the lunatic now, raging at him.

"I said, yes."

"Louder!" she demanded, grabbing hold of him and placing pressure on his arms.

"Yes! Yes, Morgan! I did. To save us, Morgan, I did it for us!" Mike's tears started. Those crocodile tears of his, each time he lied, watched her suffer. Here she thought he was so honest.

"How dare you! Get out of here. I never want to lay eyes on you again!"

She wanted him out, out of her life, out of her house.

"You get your stuff out of my house. Somebody will be here to oversee it. I'm taking my honeymoon alone. When I get back from Mexico I want you gone. Do you hear me? Gone!"

It made sense for her to take this trip, what she needed was some time to rest and heal.

"You're going without me?"

Was he kidding?

"Goodbye, Mike."

"Morgan, with time, I hope you'll see that I did it for us. I love you and I hope you'll forgive me. I had no choice."

"You had a choice, Mike. You could have chosen to be honest with me. Lies always catch up in the end. Remember that."

# CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

Morgan would be preparing for her wedding now. It had taken every bit of Declan's restraint to stay here in Florida, especially with Amber and Stephen urging him to go to her, to try to stop the wedding. The fact that she hadn't called him yet compounded with her tone the last time they spoke. She sounded confused and he feared guilt was tearing her in a different direction.

Part of him had wished he had told her that he had tried calling months ago, before she was even engaged. Obviously that snake of a man hadn't told her, and quite frankly it didn't surprise him. He should have said something, then and now, but he held back because he didn't wish to interfere.

Stupid now, he saw that in retrospect, but it was too late. She was getting married and he had no choice but to leave her alone. Witnessing the growing relationship between Stephen and Amber caused mixed feelings. He was happy for them, but their budding romance served to remind him of the love he shared with Morgan. After all those lonely years, she had been in his arms, where she belonged. Now she was the furthest from him that she had ever been.

Forcing his mind back to that dark day, all those months ago, when he had finally pulled together the courage he needed to place the call, Declan winced.

His letter had gone unanswered, so it was pretty clear that she didn't want him in her life anymore. But couldn't a letter get lost? He'd heard of that happening before. Chances were slim, but wasn't it at least worth making the call, trying one last attempt?

His therapist had succeeded in convincing Declan that he was, indeed, a whole man, one who deserved to be happy. Yes, the woman had provided him with the strength to call Morgan, to try one last time to help make himself truly whole.

Four rings had past and Declan held his cell phone tight, close to his face. For the first time in years, he heard her voice. He hadn't prepared himself for the gripping feelings that came next — the fear, the elation — it was all too much.

Like a frightened schoolboy, Declan slapped his cell shut, sweat clinging to his chest. After counting to ten, he released a pent up breath and steadied his shaking hands. He could do it; he was a strong man who had come from the brink of hell and back.

But when he placed a call again, days later, he was met with a far different voice. This one was distinctly male. Visions of another man consumed him, stealing his breath. But it could be something else, right? One thing he hadn't thought through was Morgan reaching out to another man.

" _Hello."_

He opened his mouth to speak, but couldn't find the right words.

" _Who is this?"_

Either way, Declan needed to know. "Uh... May I speak with Morgan, please?"

" _I said, who is this?" More insistent, firm._

" _Um, it's an old friend. Is she there?"_

Silence filled the line until Declan was forced to repeat himself.

" _Is Morgan there? Answer me, please."_

This time, his question was answered. "No. No, she's not. May I ask who's calling?"

Something about this man's tone of voice nagged Declan.

" _Tell her I'll call back. Tell her I've been wanting to call. Tell her I'm sorry..."_

He hadn't prepared himself for this possibility. His gut told him that this man was close to Morgan, a boyfriend, most likely. But he couldn't just leave his name, now, could he?

" _Who is this?" The man demanded again. He had to ask, he needed to know._

" _Who is this?" Declan turned the question on the man, knowing that he would deeply regret asking._

" _This. Is. Her. Fiancé. Is this Declan? It's you, isn't it? Answer me!"_

Pain seared through Declan's body as the man's voice rose higher, cutting right into his aching heart.

" _Yes, yes it is."_

" _Leave her alone, Declan! Where have you been all this time? I've been here for her, bringing her back from hell..."_

Pressing the END button, Declan finally allowed the tears to come. She was gone.

He should have called that bastard out and told her about the call, but he had felt that it would tempt fate somehow. Besides, it was true. He had waited far too long to try to make contact with her. Where did that get him now? Alone, damaged goods.

He despised it when he started feeling sorry for himself. It had been getting better for a while, but because of Morgan's silence, he was back in that dark, scary place. Amber and Stephen had tried reaching him today but he had resisted and drew himself tighter into that dark hole. Even D's sloppy kisses did nothing to brighten his foul mood.

"D, not now. You just went out."

He sat there in the dark, staring at a vacant spot on the wall. D barked, now holding out her bone for him to throw. He placed his head in his hands and ignored the bossy yelp.

A firm rapping at his door momentarily snapped him out of his thoughts. "Go away," he mumbled.

D barked to announce the visitor. "I know, D. I know"

"Open up."

He would recognize that voice anywhere. _Ugh._

"If you don't come to the door, I'll crawl through the window, just like last time," the voice threatened.

Despite himself, he felt a grin escape. Tach. It must be desperate times if Tach had been enlisted to help him. Stephen and Amber were behind this, no doubt. It was useless to pretend that he wasn't home; Tach was relentless. Sighing deeply, Declan stood, his bones aching from sitting for so long. Rapping turned into banging as Declan mumbled that he was on his way.

He was greeted with a firm handshake, then a pat on the back. D received a firm pat as well. The traitor of a dog jumped up for more attention.

"Looks like we've got a lot of work to do," Tach muttered upon taking in Declan's disheveled appearance, from the tip of his messy shock of dark hair to the sight of his five o'clock shadow and wrinkled khakis.

"Nice to see you too," muttered Declan, holding the door wide open as Tach pushed ahead to get through. _Some things never change._

"Get me an ice cold glass of iced tea and then sit your butt down and tell me what's going on." It was an order; Declan had plenty of experience dealing with orders from this man.

"Yes, sir, copy that." Declan complied with a salute, heading off to fetch the glass of iced tea.

This was not going to be fun or easy. The man had an irritating knack for getting under his skin, but he supposed that was why Tach's success rate with all kinds of rehab was ninety-nine percent successful. Pouring himself a glass of iced tea also, he figured he could surrender now, but Tach would never believe him.

Tach was right on his tail, not two steps behind, squinting at him, as if trying to figure him out. Tach knew him better than anyone else, perhaps even Morgan.

"Here you go, boss." Declan placed the beverage on the counter and met his friend's gaze head on. "What's on the agenda? Push-ups? Pull-ups?" He pulled his own glass of the refreshing tea back and waited.

"Don't be a wise guy," Tach ordered as he took a sip of his tea. "What's this I hear about you hiding out here alone, not answering calls?"

Shaking his head, Declan ran his hands through his dark mop of hair. "Listen, man. I just need some time. I'll be fine. Amber and Stephen are worried. It's been one day, just tell them I'm fine."

"I'll do no such thing. Let's talk."

Knowing he had no choice, Declan sighed and let D outside for a minute to calm her whining.

Once he was back in the living room, Tach started with one of his tales. Tales of hardship, perseverance, and ultimately survival. Declan gazed at the floor, sighing. Tach's hands gripped his shoulders.

"What the hell?" Declan cried out.

"Now you listen up, and you listen good. I can tell when you're tuning me out and that just earned you another hour with me."

Another hour. Great.

"Yes, sir." Declan saluted him, this time to be met with a firm smack across his face.

Tach was all about tough love, which was why he was among the best. Right now, however, Declan wasn't thrilled to be on the receiving end of his drill-sergeant-type love. Tach was the best guy to have on your side as a friend, but as a rehab guy, not so much.

"Man up," Tach ordered.

"Geez, Tach, that hurt."

Rubbing his cheek, he focused his attention on Tach, listening to the rest of his tale of hardship. When Tach had finished numerous tales of soldiers before, Declan actually felt like talking about Morgan.

"I could have sworn that I had her back. I would have bet my life on it," Declan shared with Tach after he had finished his own distressing tale.

"I would have too, based on the way she looked at you, man. Are you sure she's not just taking some time to think?"

Declan couldn't be sure of anything, only that he was hurting here without her. "I don't think so; I haven't heard a word from her."

"It's a tough break, that's for sure, but we're not going to let it break you."

"I don't know how I can go on without her, with half of me missing."

He had thought of this often over the past day or so. Morgan Matthews owned half his heart, and damn, she always would.

"You've made it without her before. You can do it again," Tach stated firmly, as if there were no other way around it.

"Tach? Have you ever been in love and had that person rip your heart apart?"

He doubted the man had ever experienced that kind of pain. Had Tach lived through pain on the battlefield? No doubt about that one, but from where he stood now, Declan would take that type of pain over this heartache any day.

"Declan, I've been around the block a few times, you know," Tach shared with a twinkle in his eye. "I've done a fair share of heartbreaking and yes, believe it or not, I've had my heart stomped on too." That Declan would have to see in order to believe.

"Okay, okay," Declan acquiesced.

The man had all the right answers, Declan loved the guy, but sometimes he downright hated the guy too.

Calling Declan was the only thing on her mind after Mike had left. Why hadn't Declan said anything about the phone call or letter? She hated to think about the rejection he must have felt as his attempts at communication went unanswered.

"Declan," Morgan cried out upon hearing his voice.

"Morgan. My God, Morgan."

It was so good to simply hear the sound of his voice. "Why didn't you tell me? I had no idea..."

"Slow down, Morgan. What are you talking about?"

"The phone call, the letter... I never knew about any of it," she stammered, unable to hold back her tears.

"Honey, once I saw your reaction to me at the service I figured you didn't know. I had a lot on my mind, seeing you for the first time in years, and what was the point? My goal wasn't to make Mike seem like an ass, it was to be with you."

"But, you should have told me. If I had known..."

"What would you have done Morgan?" He often wondered, but wanted to hear the response from her.

"My God, Declan. What would I have done? I would have run to you and never let you go." She didn't hesitate with her response.

He spoke moments later. "Morgan, I need to know something. Are you marrying him?"

"No, I'm not."

She heard a sigh from him and smiled.

"I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that."

One man's happiness was another's sorrow. But she wouldn't allow herself to feel sorry for Mike right now, not after everything he had done.

"I'm glad to hear that."

"I miss you. When are you coming back?"

Nothing would be better than having Declan by her side again, but she had decided to take the trip to Mexico and she would follow through with her plan to de-stress.

"I'm leaving in a few days for Mexico. The trip was booked and I can't get a refund, so I'm going on my own."

"Your honeymoon."

"Yes, I think after everything I've been through, it would do me some good. I love you, Declan and I'm not letting go of you now that you're back in my life."

"I love you, too and I promise you that I'll never leave you again, for any reason." His voice shook with emotion.

Her emotions were also raw. "I can't wait to see you again. I'll call you sometime tomorrow, is that okay?"

"You'd better. Get some sleep, sweetheart."

# CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

Peace was just what she needed. Fortunately, the flight was uneventful. The pilot announced that they were arriving in Mexico, with warm, balmy temperatures and clear skies. That sounded perfect to her. More than once she had glanced at the empty seat beside her, purchased for Mike. It made her sad to see what a mess they had both made of their relationship. To think, he had accused Declan of being a manipulator, huh.

Luckily the resort was not one of those couples-only retreats — that would have been awkward. The first thing she wanted to do was to throw her suitcase and bags in her room, change into a bathing suit, and hit the beach with an ice cold daiquiri.

Taxi services were a dime a dozen around the airport, so she didn't have a problem grabbing a ride to the resort. Once upon a time in high school, she had become barely fluent in Spanish, so she attempted to converse with the driver. He, in turn, chuckled and informed her that her Spanish was downright awful, but it was okay because he spoke English too. That was just the kind of comment that would have engaged Declan. She really missed him.

Pulling up to the resort, Morgan gasped. From the outside, the resort looked spectacular. An expansive golf resort was located to the right, and a series of individual units dotted the hilly landscape. The main building was closer to the beach, but these little rooms looked divine.

Mike had taken care of the reservation, so she wondered which type of room he had chosen. The taxi driver wished her a happy trip and dropped her off at the stunning front lobby, which was located down the hill and had open doors and windows. The fresh ocean breeze was enough to cool the inside of the lobby.

She could have stood there half the day just admiring the lobby alone but she couldn't wait to explore the rest of the resort. As a child, she had romanticized hotel stays, enjoyed exploring; today didn't feel any different. Even standing in line was exciting as a woman presented her with a tropical concoction, ice cold and tasting like the sweetest fruit.

"Just be careful not to drink it too fast," the woman had warned. "It's got some of the best rum around."

"Thanks for the heads-up," Morgan replied as she sipped at the cool drink.

"Miss?" The gentleman behind the lobby counter informed her that she was next. "Is your husband grabbing your bags?"

"Um... no."

"Oh, well, I'm sure he'll be along soon. Your room is up on the hill. One of our best honeymoon suites."

Her heart sank a bit but she forced herself to keep the glass half full and not feel any sympathy for Mike right now.

"That sounds wonderful," Morgan replied as she grabbed the keycard and placed her sunglasses on before heading outside.

Glancing around the property, Morgan saw nothing but couples. Great. She would make do and ignore the happy couples, like the one approaching straight ahead wearing _Just Married_ t-shirts.

Her legs ached by the time she finally reached her room. How was she going to make it up this hill every day? At least she would be getting a good workout, she figured. Hers was a two-unit building and it looked as if she had the upstairs unit.

The management had taken care of everything. The air-conditioning was blasting, making the room the perfect temperature. It was an expansive room, complete with a king-size bed. A sliding glass door led to her own private mini pool, wet bar, and hot tub, all situated with a killer view right on top of the cliff.

This place was the ultimate romantic getaway, but she was okay having the place to herself. Unpacking would have to wait. The beach was calling her, but first she wanted to call Declan to let him know she had arrived safely.

Declan picked up the call within a few rings. "Hey, everything okay?"

She could hear the concern in his voice.

"Yes, it is. I wanted to let you know that I arrived safely."

"Good, that's good to hear. I wish I was there with you, Morgan."

"Part of me really wishes that you were too, but another part of me needs this time, Declan. Please try to understand."

"Of course I do. It doesn't stop me from wanting to be there beside you though. I miss you."

Her heart skipped as she listened to his voice. "Declan, I miss you too. I'll call you later, okay?"

"You bet. Try to relax. You've been through a lot this past week. I love you."

From finding out that Declan was still alive, to dealing with her emotions, and cancelling her wedding, she figured she certainly had experienced a hell of a lot in a short time.

"Talk to you later. I love you too."

Morgan sat for a moment before gathering her things for the beach. She loved him, but she had so much to sort through. The endless beach would provide her with miles of solitude — just what she needed right now, time to let herself heal. As she sat on the bed, she yawned and fatigue crept through her bones. Stress was catching up to her. A nap before heading out suddenly sounded delicious.

After waking, Morgan stretched, feeling slightly better. There was still plenty of time to head down to the water. Minutes later, Morgan found herself walking the beach, searching for just the right spot to settle down for a few hours. The area at the end of the resort property was perfect; it was a secluded spot away from all the noise and activity.

Try as she might, Morgan couldn't get the images from the past few days out of her mind. Declan resurfacing, alive after all these years. All of Mike's lies. Morgan's eyes swept the serene landscape, hoping the sense of tranquility would rub off on her.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw movement, but then it was gone. A cold chill swept over her body. Strange, but then again, weren't there all sorts of creatures lurking in the jungle? She shook off the feeling as she figured her nerves were playing tricks on her. Before long, the sound of the waves lulled Morgan into peacefulness.

As the days flew by, time alone proved to be healthy and therapeutic. Morgan had even splurged for a much-needed day at the spa, complete with a pedicure and massage. She was almost starting to feel like her old self again. After so many years in waiting, it felt good. The resort even had a gym, which she took full advantage of. Nothing like a treadmill to get those endorphins going.

By the last night of her trip, she felt more relaxed than she had in years. She missed Declan, but had also needed this time to think. Trust was so important to her and she needed to trust Declan completely if this relationship was going to work. Honesty. They would have to be honest with one another as well. Knowing that his heart had been in the right place when he had made the decision to keep her out of his life wasn't enough. She should have been the one to decide what was best for her, not him. She loved him with all her heart, but they needed to talk before moving ahead with their relationship.

Every day that she had been away, he hoped she knew that what they had together wasn't wrong or anything to feel bad about. Mike's lies were unfortunate, but they couldn't turn back time and make it go away. Given the chance to do things over, a lot of decisions would have been different.

When she got back, he secured a flight north to New York. With a shaking hand, he reached for her doorbell. Coming back to New York was surreal; it was as if the place was meant for his dreams, which was exactly where New York had been confined to these past few years. He cleared his throat as he heard her coming to the door. It was just them now. No elaborate plans this time, no Ferris wheel, no magical pier, just him and her.

After opening the door she wrapped him in her arms and held on for a moment before releasing him. Declan stood back, taking in her sun-kissed complexion. She looked well rested and content. He had to kiss her; he had been waiting to since she left him in Florida.

Reluctantly, he released her. "I've missed you," he breathed.

"I've missed you, too, Declan, so much."

It was good to hear. He reached down to grab his bags and followed Morgan into the house.

"How was your flight?" Morgan led him into her warm kitchen where she took his bags and placed them on the floor momentarily.

"It was good, no problems." He had missed her so much, the way she sounded, smelled.

Standing there with her hand on her hip, she gazed at him and he thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world but something about her demeanor right now concerned him.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine, Declan." She turned away, but he could hear the hurt in her voice.

"What is it, Morgan? What's wrong?" His heart raced, all he wanted to do was see her, be with her, why was she upset?

He stepped closer, wrapping her in his arms. "Talk to me."

Shaking her head, she remained quiet.

"Morgan, I don't understand why you're upset. I thought everything was okay now." He couldn't handle it if she left him alone again. Even Tach's methods would fail him.

"I love you, Declan, and I'm worried that you have the power to hurt me again, and I couldn't make it through another time!"

Didn't she realize that he worried about the very same thing?

"I will _never_ hurt you again. I swear. Please, trust me."

"Declan, I had a lot of time to think while I was away and I found that the same thoughts and questions keep coming to mind. Truth be told, both you and Mike hurt me. As shitty as it was that Mike held back information from me, in a way, you hurt me even worse."

"Hey," he managed, not liking where this conversation was headed. "I thought we'd been through this. I thought we were past this."

Shaking her head firmly, Morgan's mouth dropped open. "How do you ever get _past_ something like this? That doesn't happen, Declan. I thought you were _dead,_ for _years._ That is not okay, no matter how you look at it."

She was right, dammit she was right. The attempt at sending the letter and phone call didn't erase his behavior. It had been too long to wait, but how long did he need to be punished for it?

"You're right. What is it you want me to say?"

"I don't know. That's just the thing — I don't know." Morgan sat down in a chair and ran her hands through her thick hair, moaning.

"Tell me what to do and I'll do it, anything, just tell me what I need to do to make this all right," he pleaded. Was this considered begging? It didn't much matter anymore.

"I don't know, Declan. I don't know what to say."

"I do. I love you and swear to you right here and now that I will never lie, never hurt you again. I'm not going anywhere, so get used to it."

His heartbeat steadied as he watched her emotions run from confusion to hope. This was it; he needed her to see that he meant every single word.

Grabbing her, he pulled her close and pressed his lips to hers, hearing her sweet surrender. Being this close to her wreaked havoc on his own emotions; he loved this woman like no other, and he would not lose her again.

He swept her into his arms and carried her down the hallway, right into her bedroom, and then placed her on the large bed.

"I want you." Declan placed soft, sweet kisses on her neck. "I want you to be mine, and you'll never regret it."

Her eyes searched his face. "I'm yours Declan. I'm all yours." The sound of her voice disappeared and he closed his eyes, allowing himself to get lost in her.

# CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

The past week with Declan had been mind-blowing and exhausting. Morgan had put her trust in him. All the time that she had to consider everything that had happened, her thoughts kept pointing back to one thing — being with him.

She was scared to death at the idea of ever losing him again, but was coming to realize that the idea of a life without him was an even scarier scenario.

Declan wanted to figure out the logistics of their relationship. It wasn't going to be easy because she loved her life here in New York, and he enjoyed being in Florida. Since Declan was on his way back to Florida that gave Morgan some time to gain perspective.

Her cell sounded a call coming through. _It must be Declan_. With a skip, she went to grab her cell. There was nobody there. That was strange. Even stranger, it was a blocked call. That was the second time in the past week that she had received such a call. Checking the time on her phone, she hurried to get ready.

She and Elle had dinner plans that evening. She couldn't wait to see her friend; it had been way too long since they had last seen one another. Hustling to get out the door, Morgan knew that she had one more thing to do before she could breathe easy. She needed true closure with Mike; she still had some things she needed to do. Although it was not something she looked forward to, she knew that it was a necessary step toward healing.

Elle had gotten to the restaurant before her and had secured a table at the side of the room. After wrapping Morgan in a hug, Elle looked like she was chomping at the bit to hear the latest news. Morgan had previously filled her in on the basics over a phone call from Mexico.

"Hey, sweetie. You okay?"

"I think I am," Morgan responded.

"You will be. As hard as it must have been to call off the wedding, it was the right thing to do."

"Thanks." It meant a lot to hear the words from her friend.

"You look gorgeous. Mexico must agree with you." Elle opened her arms to embrace her friend once more.

Morgan rolled her eyes at the comment.

"Hey, you'd better be careful, you're starting to look like your mom," Elle chided playfully, which earned her a huff and a swat on her wrist from Morgan.

"Watch it, you," Morgan warned with a light smile playing on her face.

"I'm sorry, I just can't get over the fact that Declan is alive," Elle whooshed through the side of her mouth.

Elle had been shocked initially, and then had reacted similar to the way Morgan had at first — shock was followed by happiness, joy, resentment, anger... you name it. Morgan was curious as to what her friend thought now that she had time to sort this through in her head.

"I know. It's still so hard to believe. I woke up the other night, thinking he was dead, that he had never resurfaced. In my dream, I had to relive it all over again, Declan being dead."

Elle reached for her hand from across the small table and waited for Morgan to continue. The waiter interrupted Morgan's line of thought when he asked for their drink order. After both women ordered a glass of red wine, Morgan continued.

"It's scary, sometimes, to think how close I came to losing him forever. I don't think I could bear it if anything happened now."

"You two will work it out, you have to trust that. You guys are one of the lucky ones who found true love," Elle stated.

"Thanks, Elle."

"Listen, I want you to know that Declan called me while you were in Mexico. We spoke for hours, and if there's any man in the world to believe in, I truly believe that Declan's your man," Elle declared, watching the waiter place the glasses of wine on the table.

"What did he say to you? If you don't mind me asking."

"Just that he was sorry for how it all played out from the very beginning. Morgan, he lied to give you your life. It was the most unselfish move I've ever heard of. If I were you, I'd take that man and hold on for dear life. Men like him don't come around more than once in a lifetime, heck, usually not _even_ once in a lifetime."

That gave Morgan something to contemplate. It was true; it was all true. Glancing up at Elle, Morgan could see from her pained expression that there was more to tell. Morgan swallowed hard. "What else aren't you telling me?"

Shaking her head, Elle lifted her glass. "First, we toast. To you and Declan, to new beginnings."

Morgan squinted at her friend, but complied and lifted her own glass and then clinked it with Elle's.

"I'll drink to that, cheers." Morgan swallowed the delightful pinot noir and then settled her glass back on the table, waiting patiently for her friend to continue.

"So, I received another call when you were in Mexico."

Oh boy, Morgan knew where this was headed, and she didn't have the stomach for it.

"I don't know if I want to hear this, Elle." Morgan placed her hand in the air, as if she could dismiss the negative vibe.

"But you need to hear it, and you probably need to handle the situation. I don't think I have to tell you who it was. It was Mike. He called me several times. I only picked up the first two times, and since then I've been ignoring his calls."

"What does he want? Why would he be calling you?" Morgan felt her chest tighten, figuring that her relationship with Mike had ended too neatly.

With a deep sigh, Elle continued. "He wanted to tell me how much he loves you, how much he cares, that he only withheld the information because of his love for you." Elle threw her hands up in the air dramatically, mocking Mike.

"Oh Elle, what am I going to do?" She bit at her lip, feeling anxiety wash over her. "Surely he knows that it's over."

"Um, I'm not so sure about that. He seemed to think that you might forgive him and that you just needed time to think. You know what really pissed me off? He tried painting himself as the good guy and spoke about how Declan was the liar, the manipulator."

Gulping back some of her wine, Morgan figured there was a very good chance they might have to order another bottle before the night was through. "Yup, that sounds familiar."

"Oh, and then get this — he said that he was going to surprise you on your trip to Mexico. Can you _imagine?_ Thank goodness he listened when I told him to give you space."

_That would have been dandy_ , Morgan thought.

"Do you think he'll just leave me alone? I mean he hasn't contacted me yet..." Morgan's voice trailed off.

"What is it Morgan?"

"I've been getting these strange calls. Hang-ups and dead air."

"Is it coming from his number?"

"Whoever it is deliberately blocks their number."

Elle raised her eyebrow. "Morgan, wake up. Of course it's him. Who else could it possibly be?"

Of course, she should have figured it out. The calls... A familiar chill returned as she now considered the possibility that he may have been in Mexico, watching her from a distance. Would he go so far as to follow her there, spy on her? Nothing would surprise Morgan at this point.

"You don't suppose he flew to Mexico anyway?"

Elle sat up straight, her eyes on Morgan. "I hadn't thought about that. Why, did something happen in Mexico?"

"I don't know, not really. A few times I felt as if I were being watched. I dismissed the feelings as a case of raw nerves, perhaps even an animal, or something. There was a jungle right near the resort. It could have been anything."

Elle huffed loudly. "A jungle you say? How fitting."

"Seriously, it could have been him. I'm concerned about what he may do. I think I should go talk to him, you know, get closure, and then maybe he'll stop." It could work.

"Yeah, or maybe he'll kidnap you and never let you go."

"That's not funny," Morgan pouted.

"All kidding aside, I would be careful. I wouldn't talk to him alone. I would meet in a public place, a very _crowded_ public place."

That was a good idea. Her cell rang. Glancing down at the call she saw that it was blocked again. Holding her cell up so that Elle could see the blocked call, her friend shook her head.

"Maybe you should come stay with us tonight." Elle grew serious.

She couldn't be afraid to go home. She was just letting her imagination get the best of her. It could even be a wrong number. She probably had nothing to worry about.

Elle fiddled with her cell and then looked up at Morgan. "That settles it. I'm staying with you tonight. We don't have to work in the morning so it's no big deal, and don't even think about arguing with me because Billy said he'll lock me out if I even tried coming home."

It wouldn't hurt to have some company. Morgan grinned at her friend. That's what friends were for, she supposed. "Thank you, Elle."

"Do I hear someone talking in the background?" Morgan was on the phone with Declan saying goodnight. She shot her friend a filthy look. Now she would have to tell Declan something; she didn't want him to worry, so she omitted the fact that someone had been calling her.

"Um, yeah. Elle is going to stay the night, you know, a girl's night kind of thing." Biting her lip, she hoped he didn't pick up on anything unusual.

"What's up, Morgan? Tell me what's wrong." Either her voice couldn't disguise the apprehension, or the man knew her too well.

Cringing, Morgan opened her mouth to respond and then shut it again to think about the best way to answer him.

"Oh, it's nothing, nothing for you to worry about. I just got kind of spooked after getting some calls with nobody on the line. I'm just being silly, that's all." She even chuckled to lighten the mood. It didn't work.

"What else aren't you telling me?"

Geez, the man was unbelievable. Sometimes his uncanny ability to read her so well got under her skin.

"If you don't tell me, Elle will."

Well, he was right about that. Elle would tell him — in a heartbeat.

"Mike has been calling her and talking nonsense, that's all."

"That's _all?_ What has he been saying?" he demanded, anger rising in his tone.

Morgan filled him in on Mike's conversations with Elle, trying her best to be upbeat. When she had finished, she held her cell back from her ear, predicting the yelling that would surely come next.

"Put Elle on the phone," he yelled.

Morgan winced and handed her cell to Elle. She watched as Elle nodded and agreed with him several times before handing the phone back to her. Elle raised her eyebrows and hurried out of the room. _Great_.

"I told Elle that she is not to leave you alone tonight, and I need to think about the best way to handle this."

"Declan, he's not a monster, for goodness sake. I'll be fine," Morgan muttered dramatically.

"Don't underestimate him. I don't trust the guy."

His words scared her; usually Declan was an excellent judge of character.

"Fine. Now, get some sleep."

"You too, sweetheart. Promise me you'll call if you need me, or if anything happens," Declan ordered.

Elle and Declan were both making such a huge deal out of this; they would all probably have a good laugh about this one day. But then, neither Elle nor Declan had ever been ones to overreact.

"I promise."

After saying goodbye to Declan, she checked the locks on all her doors before heading to bed. She had said goodnight to Elle and made sure she was comfortable in the guest room before settling in herself. Once she was lying in bed, she couldn't shut her mind down. It was on Declan, Mike, and everything in between. Mike surely wouldn't do anything to harm her, she was almost positive of it.

Her cell buzzed, signaling a message coming through. Declan often liked to text goodnight messages even after they spoke. But it wasn't Declan.

**We need to talk. I'm outside** _._

A feeling deep in the pit of her stomach began to ache. She could ignore Mike but he wouldn't stop. She would handle it properly.

Not a good time. I agree, we do need to talk. I'll call you in the morning.

There, that should do it. Another buzz from her cell.

I want to come in. I need to see you NOW.

Just the way he had used caps to emphasize the word now freaked her out.

Go home, you're not coming in. I'll call you tomorrow.

No response was a good response, she figured, in a situation like this. Remaining on high alert, she peeked out the window and didn't see his car in the driveway. Good, that was definitely a good thing. Now she could try to get her mind to relax so that she could get some sleep.

Her mind was weaving in and out of sleep when she heard the sound. It was a squeak; no, it was a thump. It must be part of a dream, her head felt heavy and she longed for a deeper sleep.

"Wake up and be quiet," the voice commanded.

Sitting up in a flash, she was instantly alert.

"What are you doing here?"

His palm went straight to her mouth, forcing her to be quiet.

"I know you have Elle here, and I don't want you to wake her up. I'm going to let you go, but I don't want you to yell, got it?"

He was crazy, coming here and sneaking into her house in the middle of the night.

Slowly, he released his hand from her mouth. She could smell his breath; it was hot on her face. Her chest thumped wildly. What should she do, yell for Elle? She decided that she would try it his way at first and get him to leave.

"Mike," she whispered. "You're scaring me. You shouldn't be here."

In the dark, she could just about make out his smile. His lack of response bothered her.

"How did you get in?"

"I made a copy of the key that you insisted I leave behind," he whispered back, close to her ear.

The hair on the back of her neck stood up straight. She was a fool. She forgot to have the locks changed, just like some pitiful victim in a cheesy horror flick.

"You've been having some fun, now, haven't you? I've seen him over here the past week. Must have been nice to have your old friend over for such a long visit. I'm surprised you didn't just go ahead and bring him on our honeymoon. At least you had the sense to go without him."

Wait — did that mean he had really been there? Of course he had, this was getting crazy. Forget doing it his way, this conversation was headed down a dangerous path.

"Elle, wake up!" she yelled as loud as she could, causing Mike to clamp down fiercely on her mouth.

"Shut the hell up, shut up!" Mike hissed.

Footsteps from down the hallway became louder. The door opened and the light was switched on immediately.

"What is going on? Mike?" Elle's eyes were wide, registering confusion.

Mike stood, glaring back and forth between the two women.

"You do know that this is breaking and entering and I've already called the police," Elle stated in a surprisingly calm tone of voice.

Morgan knew that Elle wouldn't have had the time to make the call, but Mike didn't seem to figure that out.

He backed his way out the door, holding a shaking finger directed at Morgan. "You'll be sorry. Nobody makes a fool out of me. You can't just get rid of me and replace me with _him."_ His voice shook as he spoke, spittle forming at the corner of his mouth.

"Get out, Mike. Don't you come back here, either. I thought we could talk like civil human beings, but I was wrong. What did you expect, that I'd forgive you?"

"You forced me into a corner, how could I compete? I needed him to stay gone. That was the only way we had a chance!"

"But don't you see how wrong that was? Maybe I never got over Declan, maybe that was my piece in this mess, but it just proves that you and I were never meant to be!"

It felt like ages ago when they were at that upstate cabin, newly engaged. Was this even the same man?

"We were meant to be and we're _still_ meant to be. We just have to get Declan out of the picture and we'll be fine." Tears flooded from his eyes. He had lost control of his emotions.

"No, Mike, you're wrong. It never felt right, really right, and I shouldn't have pursued a relationship with you. I wasn't ready and I should have known better." She felt calmer, more in control of her emotions now.

His mournful gaze traveled over her face, he stood staring at her, just staring.

"Mike, you need to leave now. Please don't call me or stop by. It's over."

"That's where you're wrong, Morgan, it's not over, it's far from over." His words were laced with a threat; she could hear it and she could see from Elle's face that her friend heard it as well.

"Mike, I believe the lady asked you to leave," Elle commanded, crossing her arms over her chest.

With a last menacing look at the two women, he was gone. Morgan didn't let herself breathe until she heard the front door slam. She walked to the living room to make sure he was gone; she needed to physically see him run across the street and get in his car in order to feel safe. Elle stood waiting for her.

"First thing tomorrow, we're going to the hardware store," Elle ordered softly.

"Thank you, thank you for being here. I don't know what would have happened if you weren't." Morgan wept quietly, grateful that she had Elle beside her.

# CHAPTER THIRTY

Morgan had called, as promised, in the middle of the night to tell him about the incident. Come hell or high water, that man would not touch her again or see her again if he had anything to do with it. It didn't sound like Mike was wrapped too tightly right now and that's what frightened Declan.

It made him crazy to think that the man had just walked into her home, in the middle of the night. _He had just walked in._ Unbelievable! Gripping his fists tightly, he punched the wall, causing D to whine softly and turn to head into the kitchen. Gut reactions included hopping on the first flight to New York, searching Mike down, and beating the crap out of him.

Taking a seat on the couch, Declan pondered over the dilemma. An unstable man was a dangerous man. Especially if that man had been burned by a woman. Morgan had insisted that she was okay, that she had Elle to protect her, and that she had changed all her locks. Thank goodness for that, but he still didn't feel right being all these miles away from her.

Although he had just taken some time off from the shelter, he was pretty sure that both Amber and Cathy would be okay with him heading back there and besides, there had been several volunteers who had been donating plenty of time at the shelter lately. That settled it. Whether Morgan liked it or not, he was headed back to New York.

Wet kisses covered his arms as he looked down and laughed at D. "You're coming this time, girl, don't worry."

D barked in agreement, cozying up to Declan. Nope, he wouldn't even tell Morgan — that beautiful, stubborn woman — that he was coming. She would only insist that she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

There was no way he would leave her alone. He powered up his computer and booked the flight for tonight, a red-eye, one way for now. Knowing that he would be seeing Morgan by early morning, he grinned as he packed light for his trip. Whatever else he needed besides some clothes, a few other items, and his toothbrush he could buy when he reached New York. Grabbing the dog carrier from outside on his back porch, he figured he was ready to go. Now all he needed to do was wait.

The shadows lengthened and the sunlight faded as Declan grew increasingly anxious to see her again.

"Let's go, D." He whistled as he grabbed his bag and D, heading straight for the airport.

_One more errand left for today,_ she thought with slight apprehension. Mike's ring would need to be returned; it was the right thing to do. There was no way that she was going to hand deliver the ring, no thank you, so she drove over to his place when she knew that he would be working. The ring would be safe in his mailbox near the front door; she had boxed it and wrapped it up.

Evening came and her thoughts came back to Mike as she prepared for bed. She was sorry it had come to this and hoped that he could move on and leave her and Declan in peace. Declan had offered to come and stay with her for a while and as much as she would love having him around, she just couldn't ask him to drop everything to run and protect her. Part of her now wished that she hadn't been so stubborn. Missing him every day since he had returned to Florida had been tough on her. There had been no more blocked calls or messages today, thank goodness, and she felt herself begin to relax.

A sudden ring of her phone sent her jumping. So much for her steady nerves.

"Hey beautiful." Declan always chose a similar greeting and it got to her every time.

"Hi handsome, I'm glad that you called. I was just thinking of you." Morgan twirled her hair with her finger, happy to hear from him.

"No more problems?"

She opened her mouth to tell him that she had returned Mike's ring when she thought better of it. There was no need to get into every single detail of her actions. It was done, another piece of the debris tidied away.

"Nope," she replied, biting at her lip.

"Good. I still think I need to pay a little visit to that guy, give him a piece of my mind."

She knew that he was itching to punch the man square in the face to pay him back for all the trouble he had caused, but he respected Morgan's wishes to stay away and let things settle down. Declan promised he would be okay with that, as long as there were no more problems. He had never been the kind of man to take a first punch just for the sake of a good fight. He was a trained soldier who was taught to fight when absolutely necessary, not for the sport of it, and Morgan respected the man's values.

"Settle down, cowboy, no fights, you hear? It's fine. I think it will be okay now," Morgan quipped.

"Yeah, yeah. I wanted to tell you I miss you."

"I miss you too. I can't wait to see you again," Morgan added.

More and more, her mind was busy thinking of ways that they could be together. Maybe they could stay in New York and keep his aunt's house as a vacation home. She would love to be able to travel back and forth with him. They could even rent it out certain months, so it would be more of a practical decision. Wondering what his opinion would be, she intended to think about it some more and then pick his brain soon.

It sounded as if there was a lot of background noise; she wondered where he was calling from. "Where are you, Declan?"

"Oh, it's just the television. Listen, I'm going to say good night. I love you and can't wait to see you."

She wanted him beside her, right here and now, but she would have to wait. It wouldn't be too long before they made it work, she hoped.

"I love you, too." Maybe she was feeling sentimental; she found herself wanting to tell him how happy she was that he was back in her life. "Declan?"

"Yes?"

"I just wanted to get sappy here for a moment and tell you again how happy I am that I have you back."

"I love you, do you know that? I love you and I'm going to hold you to that promise you made me years ago. You know the one where you promised me that you would become my wife? Well, Morgan, I'm holding you to it."

She knew that he would, and she wanted it so much. What would people think, though? All of this happening so soon? She shouldn't be worried about what other people thought, it was her life, Declan had stated over and over.

She would be a liar if she denied the fact that she had brought his ring up from the dark basement and had secured a bright, happy place for it, right in her jewelry box upstairs in her bedroom. Could she deny that she also loved to try it on, holding her finger up in the bright light, seeing the diamond sparkle a hundred different colors?

"Okay, Declan, soon."

It was the closest she had come to admitting that she, too, couldn't wait to become Mrs. Declan Blake. In reality, they had both waited for years for this time to come.

"Good night."

His gentle words hit her right in the heart.

"Good night, Declan."

It would be a good idea to get right to bed. She would be alone tonight despite Elle's insistence that she didn't mind staying over again. Locks had been changed, doors and windows shut tight; there would be no more problems. She hadn't been sleeping well lately with so much on her mind, and Mike's little visit had certainly not helped. Hugging her pillow to her chest, she wouldn't fight it. She let thoughts of Declan help bring her to sleep.

It was late, or rather early in the morning, when she heard the sound. It seemed like some kind of movement from downstairs. She was alert instantly, sitting up, heart racing. Straining to hear, she listened intently as the silence overwhelmed her. Nothing. It was probably just the house settling.

Cautiously, she laid her head back on her pillow and felt her heart rate return to normal. Then she heard the sound again, this time louder, definitely not the house settling. If she had a pet, she could write it off as her pet moving around the house, but there was no pet. Clutching her cell phone beside her, she pressed Elle's name. If it was nothing, her friend would understand since she had promised to call at the slightest problem.

_Come on, Elle, pick up._ Of all times for her friend not to pick up, but then again it was the middle of the night. With her heart beating wildly, she moved to check out the window for any cars in the driveway — nothing. If Mike were to pull something again, he would most likely park across the street but she didn't feel brave enough to venture outside her bedroom.

She should have locked her bedroom door. She should have, but she could definitely take care of it now. _Careful does it._ Tip-toeing to the bedroom door, her cell phone still in hand, she reached for doorknob, preparing to lock it.

The force of the door opening hit her smack in the face, knocking the still ringing cell phone from her hand. Her fight or flight instincts slammed into place, she immediately pushed at the door, screaming as loud as she could, fighting for all she was worth. The person on the other side of the door had her beat; they were much stronger than her, she wasn't going to win this fight. Declan's face flashed before her, telling her to be strong. _Oh my God, help me._

"Stop fighting me, stop it, Morgan!" Sour breath and hard alcohol, whisky or rum hit her senses, making her want to vomit.

"Let me go!" she screamed. "Help!"

He flipped the light switch on, and his bloodshot eyes fell upon her.

"You know that you shouldn't be here. How did you get in?"

She held back a sob; she didn't want him to feed off of her fear.

"I just... I just found the window... downstairs." His speech was slurred; this made her more nervous.

The basement window, she had forgotten about the basement. _Don't aggravate him. That will only intensify his anger._

"Okay, Mike, you've been drinking..."

"You think?" His laugh wasn't humorous; it was creepy.

"So why are you here? What is it that you want?"

It was a daunting task, but she thought that she made a good attempt to appear calm.

Mike's fingers fumbled, eventually producing the diamond ring. _Oh, this is not good._

Swaying slightly, he held up the ring, far away at first, but then he brought it close to her face, so close that it brushed her eyelashes.

"Mike, I thought you'd want it back. I was giving it back to you."

Knowing that anything else she said right then would only further aggravate him, she bit her tongue.

"I'm speaking now. Don't be rude. I think you've been rude enough," he stumbled over his words.

"What is it that you want me to say?" Anger was seeping in; this was crazy. "What can I say, Mike?"

"It's too late... nothing you can say. The damage is done."

What was that? She thought she heard a siren approaching from a distance. Keep him talking, that was her plan now. She had to rein in her emotions. Maybe Elle had picked up her call after all and help was on the way, she could only hope at this point.

"Mike, wait. Listen..."

"I loved you, how could you do this to me?" Mike's hands went to his face.

"Mike, try to calm down so that we can talk about this."

"I don't want to talk about this!"

Morgan cringed at the sound of his voice. She needed time, she had to stall him.

The sirens drew closer but they were still too far away. _Please, please..._

Wait- she was sure that she heard someone on the stairs. It must be Elle; Elle must have come for her.

"Elle!"

Mike pinched her hard, causing her to cry out.

Declan's face came into view, running into the room, shouting for Mike to get his hands off her. Mike spun at the sound of Declan's voice and released Morgan, retreating into the bedroom with a smirk on his lips.

"Oh... I can't fight a soldier... a soldier with a disability."

Declan's fist connected with Mike's face. Mike hit the floor; the engagement ring flung across the room. Mike was out; he lay with his face to the hard wooden floor.

"Declan!" She jumped into his arms, causing him to stumble a bit. "Oops, sorry." She placed kisses all over his face, from his forehead down to his chin and back again.

"Are you okay?" Declan questioned, returning her kisses with his own.

Morgan nodded as she gazed at him. Declan gently set her down and placed his arms on hers. "Morgan, I don't know what he would have done to you had I not been here," Declan began, shaking his head. "I can't bear to think about anything happening to you. I can't lose you."

Morgan didn't want to think about what would have happened to her. Hopefully she would have been able to talk some sense into him; maybe he would have even passed out. She was just grateful that Declan had shown up when he did. Wait — what was Declan even doing here? The sound of sirens grew closer, until Morgan knew the police had arrived at her house. She breathed a bit deeper.

"How... why are you here?"

"I decided that I didn't trust the guy, call it a gut feeling, so here I am. I saw that your bedroom light was on and then noticed the basement window open."

"Did you call the police?"

"I didn't have the chance," Declan responded.

So it was Elle.

To think that she had tried to talk Declan out of coming here. Groaning complaints came from the floor; it looked like Mike was waking up. Declan bent down to grab the man, assisting him to a standing position. Mike rubbed at his jaw, staring up at Declan.

"Declan."

"You know what, Mike? I believe you owe the lady an apology."

Glancing at the floor, Mike mumbled his lame attempt at an apology. Declan placed a hand on the man's shoulders, then spun Mike toward him.

"Now, I want you to understand this — if I _ever_ see you near Morgan again, if you ever talk to her again, you won't be so lucky next time, you hear? I won't be as kind."

Mike opened his mouth to speak as Declan clamped down harder on his shoulder.

"Yes," Mike mumbled.

"Sorry, what was that?" Declan placed a hand to his ear, pretending that he couldn't hear.

"Sorry, sir." Mike stated, louder this time.

"Good. Now, I believe we have some company."

Morgan ran out of the room to let the police inside. She returned after briefly explaining the situation to the two officers. The younger of the two officers approached Mike, guiding him out of the room as he read him his rights. Morgan could hear muttered complaints from Mike. She didn't completely relax until she heard her front door slam shut.

"Declan..." It was all she could say as she threw herself in his arms. Weeping softly, she clung to him.

"You're safe. I'm never going to let anything happen to you."

"Promise?"

"Promise," Declan answered.

After a moment, Declan straightened and gazed at Morgan. "Oh, Morgan, do me a favor, would you? D is here in my rental car, can you grab her?"

Morgan jumped up. "I would love to," she wiped her tears.

# CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Both Morgan and Declan were too hyped up to sleep. How could they with all that had just happened? Declan couldn't believe his timing, if his flight had been just a half hour later, who knew what Mike may have done. Morgan stated that she had never seen Mike drunk like that before. The guy had been through a lot in the past few weeks, but it was his own fault and it wasn't cool to go breaking into his ex's house. Twice.

"I could use a glass of wine, how about you?"

Morgan stood to grab a wine glass and a chilled bottle of red wine. He raised his eyebrow at the bottle of wine.

"Still chilling red wine?" He smiled at her.

"You bet. I discovered that little secret with a special guy I knew a long time ago," Morgan replied, leaning over to kiss Declan on the cheek.

"Oh really?" He laughed, taking the glass that Morgan offered to him.

The chilled wine went down easy. He had been chilling his own red wine at home the past few years, a custom that he didn't break, especially since it had reminded him of his times with Morgan.

"You know, we've been through a hell of a lot together, you and I," Declan said, a curious look on his face. "I mean _a lot._ "

Morgan seemed to ponder over his statement, silently agreeing by shaking her head. "And we've come through it together, after all this time."

"True," Declan agreed.

"And I bet that we can weather through a lot more and still stay together, what do you think?" Declan inquired, his dark blue eyes fixed on Morgan.

"I think it's pretty certain." She giggled, kissing him full on the mouth.

Declan grabbed her by the hand and guided her to his lap. She fit perfectly, but appeared uncomfortable about something.

"Am I hurting you?"

"Morgan, I'm fine. Tell you what, unless I complain that something you do hurts me, just assume that it doesn't. I'm not shy. I'll tell you."

"Oh, you're not shy." She leaned down, kissing him again.

They talked for hours, catching up on each other's lives over the past few years. D was fast asleep on the floor by their feet, softly snoring. They finished the bottle of wine before realizing that the sun was coming up. Declan pulled her toward the sliding glass door and opened the door to the deck. Standing together in silence, they gazed at the mauve sky.

"Ready for bed?" Morgan rubbed her eyes, leaned her head against his shoulder, and grabbed his hand. "It's been a long night. Actually it's morning." Morgan giggled softly.

Declan stopped her, appearing serious. He swallowed, deciding to take the chance.

"I have something I want to give you, right here, right now." He could see the confusion on Morgan's face as she tried to figure out what he was talking about. "Where is it? Tell me," he asked.

Morgan waited a moment, serious now herself. "It's in the top drawer of my jewelry box," she whispered.

"Stay here. I'll be right back."

He walked to her bedroom, following her directions, and found it. He turned it around in his hand, a warm memory settling in — a fireplace, a restaurant, a beautiful woman, a long time ago.

She was still on the deck, looking adorable in her pajamas with the pink sky softening her long brown hair. As he got down on one knee, she cringed, looking at him.

"I'm fine," he promised, trying to ignore the discomfort it placed on his knee. He had to do this the right way, after all.

"Morgan, I realize this is now, let's see, the _third_ time I've proposed to you, and each time so far you've said yes." It warmed him to see her jump up and down, holding her hand over her mouth in awe.

"So, please, say yes one more time and make me whole. I was only half alive without you, and I need to feel whole again. Put this ring back on your finger where it belongs. I want _you_ back where you belong, right here with me."

Morgan guided him up, helping him stand. After placing the sweetest kiss she could on his mouth, she answered. "Yes, yes! A thousand times, yes!"

He drew her in for another kiss that almost lasted until the sun finished rising in the sky.

"Let's go to bed now." He raised his eyebrows.

"You bet," Morgan responded with glee, pulling at his hand.

It felt right, being back in his arms. It was as if she were home now, after a long, strenuous journey. Heartache was something she never thought would completely disappear. Now she found peace and her heart was light once more, free from the weight of sorrow and the tangle of bittersweet memories.

Although Mike had promised not to call or text, she did receive one text from him days later, apologizing for breaking into her house, that he'd had too much to drink, and had been depressed about everything going on. Morgan had decided not to press charges, she figured the experience of being hauled off in handcuffs had finally registered the fact that he needed to let her go. He stated that he would be leaving her alone and even took some blame for lying about Declan's call and letter. She felt as if that was closure for him and hoped that he would move on with his life and not contact her again.

The mention of the letter got her thinking about it again. That letter kept coming up in her mind. When she had inquired about it, Declan stated that he couldn't recall exactly what he had written but that he pretty much poured his heart out, asking for her to forgive him. Most likely, Mike had tossed the letter. Knowing him, he had probably burned it.

Declan must have sensed that she was deep in thought as he remained silent, sitting beside her at the kitchen table. Morgan took a last sip of her coffee and hustled to place her mug in the dishwasher.

"Have a good time. I wish I could see the dress you pick, I'm sure it will be beautiful."

"Thank you, honey." Morgan reached up to kiss him gently on the mouth before she headed out to meet the girls in town.

Shopping for her wedding dress would be a different experience this time around. This time, there was not a speck of doubt; she was following her heart and nothing felt better.

Morgan planned for her wedding like the young girl who used to dream of becoming a bride. Amber was now here visiting Stephen, so she took full advantage of her visit, including both her and Elle in the fun of planning for her wedding. The women were getting along famously; somehow Morgan had a feeling they would. They were both pulling dress after dress off the racks, admiring them as Morgan shook her head at their choices.

"Hey, what do you guys think of this one?" Morgan pulled a classic, white, strapless gown from the rack.

It was just what she had imagined, not too puffy, just right. It was soft white in color with a long, ivory sash. Her eyes went wide, taking in the stitching. This was stunning; she hoped it looked just as beautiful on her as it did on the hanger. Morgan was thrilled that she hadn't seen this dress when she had shopped months ago for her first dress. This was what she had been searching for. She had donated her other wedding dress to a worthy cause, a foundation that helped women who were experiencing financial hardship. A smile formed on her lips as she pictured another woman wearing the other dress. It wouldn't go to waste; it had served its purpose.

"I like it." Amber nodded her head thoughtfully. "Definitely try it on."

"Wow." Elle fingered the soft material. "Yup, this one looks great. Give it a try."

The shop assistant approached Morgan, a bright smile etched on her face. "Oh, that's a great choice, stunning, yet simple and elegant. Would you like to try it on?"

"Yes, please," Morgan exclaimed, barely able to contain her excitement.

With the joy of a child, Morgan entered the dressing room, almost afraid to try the dress on. It was that beautiful. All of the planning she had done with her last attempt at a wedding had felt half-hearted; this was what it was like to marry her best friend and soul mate.

The assistant helped Morgan ease the gown over her head and fasten the buttons on the back. She noted that it was a tad too big, but alterations could take care of the size. Spinning around in front of the mirror, she couldn't contain her wide smile and squeak of happiness.

"You look amazing, beautiful..." The assistant nodded her head in delight.

"How's it going in there?" Elle called out.

What would her friends think? She held her breath as she exited the changing room.

"Oh. My. God." Amber stood, her mouth open.

"That's it. That's the one. It's positively gorgeous!" Elle squealed, watching Morgan spin around.

"But it's the first dress I tried on. Do you think I should try some more on?" She loved it but wanted to test her friends, see what they really thought.

"No," the women said in unison.

"Great, that's how I feel, too." She was sure of it. The price wasn't too awful, so she made her decision.

"Wonderful, the fit is almost right. I would take a tuck here and there. Minimal alterations would take care of it all. You look beautiful." The assistant beamed.

"I'll take it," Morgan announced.

She hurried back into the dressing room so that she could make the purchase.

The wedding was to take place at the beginning of August. She would still be off from work, which left them plenty of time for the honeymoon that she had been waiting so long to take with him. With the few alterations that would need to take place, the shop owner assured Morgan that the dress would be ready in time.

"How about bridesmaids dresses? Can I help you find anything?"

Morgan wanted to keep everything as simple as possible but she would like to have two bridesmaids at her wedding.

"What do you guys think? See anything you like?" Amber and Elle smiled at her then reached out to hug her.

"You know," Amber started, glancing at Elle. "The bridal gowns are gorgeous here, but I bet we could get something much better for the two of us somewhere else."

"She's got a point, and it would be much cheaper. That is if you don't mind," Elle agreed.

They did have a point. Honestly, she didn't care where they bought the dresses.

"Tell you what, you guys have free rein over your dresses. The two of you can decide on style, color you name it. I only ask that you pick the same dress."

She would let them hash it out; she had too many other important things to attend to. Namely, having a cup of coffee right now.

"Who's up for grabbing a cup of coffee?"

Both women agreed as Morgan finalized the details of buying her dress. It was a relief to have that crossed off her list of things to do. She and Declan had discussed their dream destinations and they had decided to stick with their original plan — they would book a trip to Costa Rica. He told her that she had enough to take care of and that he would be planning the entire trip, from start to finish.

As they made their way to the coffee shop, Morgan thought about how far she and Declan had come and how thrilled she was to spend the rest of her life with him.

"What are you so happy about?" Elle inquired, raising her eyebrows.

"Oh I don't know. Just everything, I guess."

"I have to agree you've got yourself a good guy." Amber grinned.

They lucked out and found Morgan's favorite table in the coffee shop; it was tucked away in a little corner near the window so they could gaze out the window and people watch. Elle offered to put their order in for coffees and cheesecake while Morgan and Amber settled at the table. There had been a lot of things on her mind lately and opening up to Amber was on her list of things to take care of.

"You know, when I first met you and found out that you had feelings for Declan I wasn't too happy about it," Morgan confided, watching Amber's face go still. "But, once I got to know you, it was a different story. I was thankful that Declan had found a friend in such a good, loyal person."

It was Amber's turn now and judging from the smirk on her face, she had some things to get off her chest as well.

"I guess it's my turn to be honest here. When I first laid eyes on Declan, I knew right away that he would be a very special person in my life. Yes, at first I thought that I was meant to be with him."

Morgan squinted her eyes and clenched her jaw at that. It was never easy to hear that another woman had her sights on Declan.

"But then I grew to know him well, we sort of became friends, I might even venture to say best friends," Amber admitted.

This earned another icy glare from Morgan. Perhaps there were things better left unsaid.

"I knew in my heart that he belonged with you. I encouraged him to contact you and try to talk to you."

Morgan nodded. "I know that you did and I thank you for that."

"Once I met you and saw how beautiful and sweet you were, I knew exactly why Declan never got over you, but I was a bit jealous of you too, if we're going to be honest here. Not in the way you think, but I figured that you'd try to tear me and Declan apart, that you wouldn't understand our relationship," Amber continued.

The news of their closeness stung, but Morgan knew that this woman and Tach were largely responsible for getting Declan back on his feet.

"I understand now, I do."

"I can see that and I appreciate it. You guys belong together. If we're going to talk about fate here, I suppose it was my fate to meet Declan so that I could help bring him home to you," Amber finished, wiping at a tear.

This woman was going to make her an emotional wreck before the wedding took place, but in a good way. Swiping away her tears, Morgan watched as Elle approached the table, carefully placing the tray of coffee on the table.

"Okay, what happened here? I was gone for what, five minutes? What did I miss?" Elle asked, glancing from Amber to Morgan and back again.

"Nothing, it was nothing," Morgan stated softly. "Amber, I think there was another reason you were destined to meet Declan."

She supposed she was a believer in fate once more.

"Stephen," Amber finished for Morgan. Morgan nodded her head softly, glad that they had cleared the air.

"I guess things are getting serious with the two of you?" Elle questioned.

"I guess you could say that." Amber grinned sheepishly, stirring her coffee.

"Would you say that wedding bells might be in your near future, too?" Elle giggled, taking a huge bite of the chocolate cheesecake.

"Maybe... you never know."

"What?" Morgan interjected. "Did he ask you?"

"Not in so many words, not yet, but I think he's hinting." Amber sighed dramatically, taking her own bite of cheesecake.

"Well, I think that calls for a toast," chuckled Morgan, raising her paper coffee cup. "To love."

"To love," the girls echoed.

# CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

Declan was in the meadow, under a huge tree that provided plenty of shade. About thirty guests were getting settled while he strained his eyes to locate her. Being superstitious and all, Morgan had refused to speak to him all day. That was fine with him; he had the rest of his life to spend time with her. This was what she had always wanted, a small, intimate wedding outdoors. He hoped that she would be happy with the day and that it would fulfill all her dreams.

In a million years he would never have thought this dream of his would come true. If Tach hadn't climbed through his window and straightened him out, he would never be standing here today, back with Morgan. Fingering the piece of paper in his pocket, he was relieved that he hadn't forgotten the vows that he had stayed up late writing the night before.

Glancing around for his dog, he saw that Cathy was sitting on one of the white chairs holding onto D's leash. He was happy she was able to make the trip and get coverage for the shelter. Everything appeared to be in order, from the tent a few feet away where the reception would be held to the photographer and DJ. Luckily, the weather had cooperated as well, the day was mild, a breezy seventy-eight degrees, a perfect but rare temperature for an outdoor summer wedding during the month of August in New York.

His pulse sped up as the wedding march began. Tach stood at Declan's side, offering him a smile. Stephen's eyes were straight ahead as Amber approached. She looked so young that it seemed impossible she was a grown woman. She and Elle were dressed in elegant soft pink dresses. They carried loose flowers tied with ivory ribbons. The flowers complemented the field beautifully. Amber winked at him as she took her place, mouthing that she was proud of him.

After what seemed like ages he spied Morgan holding onto the arm of her step-dad. He was happy that her step-dad and mother were here for Morgan, regardless of Morgan's relationship with her mom. He sensed that Morgan would grow to accept her mother and maybe even get along with her.

Morgan stole the show as she flowed down the makeshift aisle in a breathtaking gown that made her seem surreal. He had heard that every bride was the most beautiful on her own wedding day, but he would have never guessed just how amazing she could be. He found it interesting that she didn't wear a veil like most brides, but a simple, elegant tiara encrusted with sparkling jewels. He made a mental note to inquire about that choice. God, he loved her.

As the music ended, the pastor cleared his throat and began the ceremony. It was time for the vows. It was his idea to write his own, and Morgan decided that she was also up to the challenge of creating her own vows. It was his turn first.

Declan composed himself before he began, his eyes shining with love for Morgan. Anyone witnessing would remember the look of adoration and pure love on Declan's face as he gazed into his bride's eyes.

"Morgan, I thought we would always be together. It just wasn't possible that you and I could be torn apart by anything, even war, even my own stubborn pride. It took way too long and we went through way too many obstacles, but after all that time, we found our way back into one another's hearts, with a little help. Some hearts are just not meant to beat without their other half, their soul mate. You, Morgan, are my soul mate. Now, forever, and always. It will be an honor to call you my wife and I will love and protect you from this day forward, in sickness and health, my love will be true, Morgan, God, I love you."

His eyes held her gaze as she cleared her throat, ready to speak her vows.

"Declan Blake, I don't even know where to begin. It seems that it was always you and me. With a little help, the two of us somehow found each other through a very dark storm."

Her eyes rested on Amber, then Tach.

"Words cannot touch how much I love you. You've brought me home, made me whole, and I vow to be faithful and love you every single day of my life. I'm proud to become Mrs. Declan Blake. I only wish that your mom was here to share in our day, although something tells me she is and had been in on this plan all along. I love you, my husband, I love you."

Tears streamed from her eyes, she promised herself that she wouldn't cry, but she was helpless to stop once she saw Declan's tears. At that moment, a breeze stirred and a hawk gracefully swooped close, too close to be normal. It wasn't her imagination; the guests gasped and she knew in her heart that it was a gift from above.

There was not a dry eye in the house as they exchanged rings and the pastor pronounced them man and wife.

"You may kiss the bride."

And he did, with all the love he had for her, right in front of everyone. Applause sounded as friends and relatives shouted their approval.

Declan didn't want to let go of her hand as guests came over to wish them the best and congratulate them. He couldn't pry his eyes from her face; he knew it would probably always be like this, and that's what would keep him going. Morgan returned his look, that special glance that was just between the two of them.

Wait until he got her alone tonight, he would be thinking about that the entire day.

She was complete, her other half by her side. When Morgan thought that the day couldn't be any better, she heard the song, _their_ song. Starting softly, the DJ increased the volume as the guests stood back from the makeshift dance floor. Declan beamed at her, holding his hand out for her to grab. Once he had her in his arms, she was mush. _Someone like you..._

She was back at the Ferris wheel, so long ago, when she swore that nothing could come between them. Then there was so much unhappiness, pain, and suffering — in her own life and in the world surrounding her. But somehow they had found their way back into each other's lives, stronger than ever now. She was holding on for dear life; she would never be in that dark place again, without her husband by her side.

"I love you, husband."

"Mmm, I love you too, wife. And I'm going to show you very soon how much I do," Declan whispered into her ear as all eyes were upon them. As he kissed the side of her neck, she felt tiny electric chills race down her spine.

The wedding day went by like a blur. Stephen's best man speech was followed by Amber's. Tach's had been the most touching of all.

"I am honored to be here today, to call myself a friend of both Declan and Morgan." Hesitating, Tach cleared his throat before continuing. "Many of you probably know that I met Declan when he was in a low, low place." More hesitation.

"I've come across many soldiers in my line of duty, many men during my enlistment in the service. I have yet to meet anyone who is stronger mentally or physically than the man I am proud to call my friend, Mr. Declan Blake. Declan wanted me to go away when I first met him. He resisted my help, but I wouldn't give up on our guy here because that was me. Many years ago, I was in that same dark hole. I said to myself, not this guy, I won't let him go there. I made Declan my mission, my priority for that time. Although he's one stubborn man, he finally showed me what he was made of."

Applause sounded, then silence as everyone waited for Tach to continue.

"As far as Morgan goes, I've also met many women throughout the years."

That got a chuckle from the crowd as well as Declan.

"I used to wonder why my man here was so wrapped up in Morgan, couldn't get over her. I thought to myself, he must be crazy. He's a good-looking guy, right? He can find another good woman. What I failed to understand, until I met Mrs. Declan Blake here, was the impact that Morgan has the moment you meet her. She makes you want her in your life, as a friend, whatever. I didn't understand until the day that I met her and then I couldn't understand how he ever let her go."

Gasping, Morgan swallowed the lump in her throat.

"To Declan and Morgan, may you stay where you belong, forever, together. Cheers."

The crowd toasted as Morgan spun to glance at Declan. Tach's speech had affected him as well; he wiped his eyes and turned to face Morgan.

"He's a real heartbreaker, huh?"

Morgan nodded silently, afraid that she would break down in tears if she attempted to speak.

When it was finally time to say goodnight to their guests, Morgan sighed. Exhaustion coursed through her veins, but she couldn't wait to be alone with her husband. A fantastic bridal suite awaited them at a local hotel. Tomorrow evening they would be off on their honeymoon.

Neither said a word as the limo headed toward the hotel. Morgan placed her head on Declan's shoulder, sighing a breath of relief. They did it. They had made it. He clasped his fingers through hers and kissed the top of her head. She may have even nodded off a bit since she felt safe and secure after such a long journey.

"Wake up, we're here." He kissed her gently before stepping out of the limo, and then waited for her. "Come on, let's get this show on the road," he chuckled with a wink.

Playfully, she smacked him, but then the serious vibe in the air created a palpable tension until they found themselves alone outside their room. He kissed her deeply; she was sucked into his world.

"This is it," he breathed, his eyes focused on hers. "Once I open that door, I can't be held responsible for my actions."

"Nor can I," she flirted right back at him, gazing into his eyes.

A coughing sound intruded upon their moment as an elderly man walked past them, rolling his eyes. Giggling softly, at first, Morgan saw Declan's face then lost control. She was in a fit of laughter as Declan struggled with the keycard to open their bridal suite. He lifted her up, carrying her over the threshold.

Before them sat a spectacular king-size bed, sprinkled with red roses and adorned with swan towels. They both glanced at the bed, then each other. He kissed her, the intensity of their kiss building as he lowered her feet to the floor then pressed her back against the wall.

Gently, she guided him to the bed. Lying there, she kissed his eyes, his mouth, and then stopped. "Thank you, Declan, for everything."

Gazing at her with his deep blue eyes, he took her face in his hands. "No, thank you, Mrs. Blake, for making all my dreams come true. Now, get over here."

Waves crashed over their heads, resulting in salty spray everywhere, including her mouth and nose. Declan pulled Morgan close, kissing her salty skin.

"Let's go relax for a while." They waded out of the water together.

Leading her to their sandy spot across the beach, he held onto her hand. They sat and stared out at the ocean. The days were going by quickly, too quickly. Morgan was almost afraid to get back to reality. Here in Costa Rica, life was simple; life was perfect.

On their agenda today was zip-lining and horseback riding. Morgan had never ridden a horse before; she was both nervous and excited to build this memory with Declan. Tonight would be the last night of their honeymoon. Declan leaned on his side, twirling Morgan's salty hair through his fingers.

"Do you think you want children soon?" Declan asked, looking down at Morgan.

The question took her by surprise. Years ago they had talked about it and had both agreed that wanting children was something they both had in common. They hadn't discussed it since they'd reunited, but her feelings hadn't changed.

"I think so. I want a couple, Declan, is that okay with you? Remember when we used to talk about a little boy who looked exactly like you?"

"Or a little girl who looks just like her mom." Declan kissed the tip of her nose.

"Hmm, that sounds nice. Maybe both?" Morgan giggled, wiggling her toes in the hot sand.

"Absolutely," Declan mumbled, kissing Morgan on the mouth.

"Hey, hey. You're going to get us in trouble here." She swatted him playfully.

All kidding aside, she would love to be a mother. Declan would be a kind and protective dad. She could just imagine if they had a daughter one day. He would be that dad that all the guys were intimidated by. The poor girl's dates would be in trouble, Morgan giggled softly.

"What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing. I'm just thinking, is all."

"Sooner rather than later?" His brows shot up and Morgan couldn't contain a grin.

That sounded nice. Morgan had heard that it could take years for some couples to have a baby.

"Sure, why not," Morgan decided.

His grin was contagious as he settled down beside her on the towel.

"What do you say, if it's a boy we name him Tach?"

Was he kidding? God, he had to be kidding. Please let him be joking.

"You're... not serious, are you?" she ventured carefully.

"Why not? I mean, it's a solid name..." Declan rambled as Morgan mentally calculated how she could get out of this one.

She opened her mouth to speak and then shut it again.

"I'm kidding!" Declan exclaimed, tickling her side. "I'm just kidding!"

"Oh... well." Morgan laughed, turning red in the hot sun.

"Had you there for a while, didn't I?"

Punching him in the arm, she chuckled. "You had me."

But a boy named Declan Jr. would be pretty cool.

# CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

It was a magical place, a magical trip, and Declan didn't want to leave tomorrow. This place was making him sentimental. He got to thinking about all the time they had spent apart, all the years they had lost. He supposed it all happened for a reason — their parting, their reconnection. If his mom were here, she would surely have a theory on this. Then again, he recalled the sudden breeze, the hawk swooping in so low, and he felt certain that she was somehow a part of all of this magic.

Morgan smiled up at the waiter, ordering her meal. He would remember this night in detail — the sound of the ocean, the gentle beat of soft music filling the outdoor restaurant. When the waiter asked for their drink order, Morgan ordered one of her favorite tropical drinks, then hesitated, claiming that she'd stick with water. Raising an eyebrow, Declan ordered the same. It was, indeed going to be a night filled with magic; he could feel it in the air.

"Not in the mood for a drink tonight?" Declan inquired, a grin playing on his lips. He rubbed her thigh under the table.

Morgan swallowed, shaking her head. They finished their meals quickly; Declan thanked the waiter, and led Morgan to the dark, deserted beach.

Turquoise water sparkled under the bright full moon. Declan held her hand as they walked the length of the beach. The unusually bright moonlight guided them to a cozy, sandy spot off in a remote section of the beach.

Declan took his time, carefully lowering his body to sit on the sand. Morgan sighed as Declan placed his hand in the air, reaching for her to follow, his eyes wide and hopeful as she sat, never taking her eyes off him. The kiss started sweet and slow; they were making up for all that wasted time. There was magic in the air tonight, he was sure of it.

# EPILOGUE

Six Weeks later

The attic was a dusty, hot mess. Morgan must be crazy to come up here now, with a heat wave in September. She needed that box containing her old college textbooks. Better late than never, it seemed that Elle had finally decided to go back to school and pursue her degree in education. She would miss working with Elle, but in a few weeks her replacement would be moving to New York from Florida.

Amber and Stephen had planned a late fall wedding and she would need to have a job here in New York. It didn't hurt that Morgan had a huge influence on hiring an aide for her classroom since her principal trusted her judgment. Amber was a natural with animals and children; she would fit in just fine and there was a retired aide who had promised to cover for Amber until she settled in.

Amber had shared that a break from the long hours of nursing would do her good. One day she may even return to the job. Of course, Amber and Declan already had plans to volunteer at the local shelter. Morgan smiled just thinking about their kindness.

Where was that box? Frowning, Morgan nearly gave up searching for the books when a large bin caught her eye. Wiping sweat from her brow, she felt dizzy in the heat. She needed to sit for a moment and catch her breath. The storage bin belonged to Mike; she recognized his clothing through the clear sides. He must have forgotten that some of his clothes were up here from when they had started the process of moving in some of his things before the wedding.

Slipping her hand over the container, she then pried open the lid. Wondering if the bin contained anything important, she rummaged through some jackets and pants. Things had been silent with Mike; she wouldn't disturb the peace by returning the clothes. As she placed the lid back on top, something caught her eye. It appeared to be a piece of paper sticking out of one of the jacket pockets.

Curiosity got the best of her as she fumbled for the paper. It was a small, white envelope, opened, crushed, and worn. The envelope was addressed to her. Declan's handwriting adorned the paper — this was the letter! The letter that she had wondered about, the letter that she had never received was now lying in her hands. With trembling fingers, she opened it with the greatest of care, as if it would disintegrate from the touch of her hands.

_Dear Morgan_ ,

I've written to you countless times, endless variations of this very letter. I've lost courage and destroyed every single one. Except this one. Let me start by asking you to forgive me. I don't deserve your forgiveness, I know, but you would make me very happy if you could find it in your heart to hear me out. I did this for you, as selfish as it may seem.

Do you remember how I told you my mom cared for my father for so many of her adult years? She did, and she did it gracefully and loved my dad through it all. I witnessed so much growing up, so much sorrow. I would hear my mom at night, weeping quietly into her pillow, when she thought I was sleeping. I would stand there, a young boy at the door, my ear pressed against it, straining to make sense of the tears.

I know now that she was a prisoner in her own way, but she wouldn't have it any other way and neither would you. I didn't want that life for you, you deserved so much more. I was in a dark, dark, place for a very long time. Morgan, I came close to giving up, but it was your face that kept me going, kept me trying to reach out of the dark tunnel that consumed me. I cried for you, for Sean, and for those lost souls of ground zero. Those souls will never love again, and I guess I thought that I didn't deserve to either.

I've seen a lot in my years, too much that's haunted my waking hours and my dreams. I could give in to it all, but then I wouldn't have you. I wanted to climb to a brighter place, but didn't want to be a burden to you, mentally or physically. Remember that ride on the Ferris wheel? I gave you courage that night but you gave me courage, too, courage to love and never give up. Every time I think about that memory it makes me strong.

Well, Morgan, I think I'm starting my long journey back, thanks to you and a very good friend who wouldn't take no for an answer. I think of all that time, that wasted time you and I lost. I don't want to lose any more time with you. I made promises to you that I want to fulfill; I want you to become my wife, if you'll still have me. Come home to me, Morgan, forgive me and love me again. You're in my heart, now and always. I love you.

Declan

She didn't know how much time had passed, as she just sat there clutching the letter to her chest, weeping tears of regret, anger, and sadness.

If only she had received that letter when it was intended for her. What pain it must have caused Declan to put his heart out there and have it crushed with no response. _Declan, oh God, Declan._ Arms crossed around herself, she rocked, cursing Mike and pleading for Declan's forgiveness. Footsteps from downstairs came closer, and then she heard him calling for her.

"Morgan! Where are you?"

Catching her breath, Morgan smiled at the sound of his voice.

"I'm... I'm here, up here, Declan."

He still called out, not hearing her. She repeated herself, louder this time.

"I'm up here, in the attic."

He climbed the steps, reaching the top cautiously.

"What are you doing? It's about a hundred degrees up here, Morgan," he muttered before stopping to glance at her. "Morgan, my God, what is it, what's wrong?"

He stooped over, lifting her chin with his hand. She thrust her hand out, exposing the letter.

Declan's face clouded with confusion. "I don't understand, what is that?"

Then he must have recognized it; his mouth dropped open as he pried it from her fingers. Gazing at the paper, he read every single line he had written so long ago. His own tears fell as he sighed, sitting on a box beside her.

"Morgan." He reached for her, pushing her hair from her eyes.

"I hate him. I hate that man," she sobbed, hanging her head low.

How could anyone intentionally be so cruel? How could she have loved such a man?

"Don't, Morgan. Don't hate him. It will only eat you up inside. Let it go. I have. He loved you and didn't want to lose you, that I understand."

"But all that time we could have been together," she wept.

"It wasn't wasted time, Morgan. It made us stronger, made us appreciate what we have. I cherish every single day with you." He held her in his arms, soothing her tears until her breathing returned to normal.

"Morgan, each day is a gift with you. You surprise me all the time with your love. You rub off on me and make me happier. Please, don't be sad." He kissed her lightly on the lips.

A smirk set on her face as she gazed up into his eyes, preserving this moment, wanting to hold onto it forever.

"I have a surprise for you, right now, as a matter of fact." She grinned, her smile glowing over her tear-stained face.

"Oh yeah? What's the surprise?" Declan smiled down at her, sweating in the heat of the attic.

Suddenly his jaw dropped slightly; she could see him go still.

"No... are you serious?" He sat up straight, eyes wide.

"Declan."

She drew her words out for as long as she could, smiling openly. "You're going to be a daddy."

# ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Mya O'Malley was born and raised in the suburbs of New York City, where she currently lives with her husband, daughter and three step-daughters. The family also consists of a boxer, Destiny and a ragdoll cat named Colby. Mya earned an undergraduate degree in special education and a graduate degree in reading and literacy. She works as a special education teacher and enjoys making a difference in the lives of her students.

Mya's passion is writing; she has been creating stories and poetry since she was a child. Mya spends her free time reading just about anything she can get her hands on. She is a romantic at heart and loves to create stories with unforgettable characters. Mya likes to travel; she has visited several Caribbean Islands, Mexico and Costa Rica. Mya is currently working on her seventh novel.

# ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Thank you to Alexandra, Alan and my entire family. All of you have been such a help throughout my writing of this book and many others. Alexandra, you listened to my ideas and provided your valuable opinions on my writing. Alan, thanks for the countless hours (think: long car rides) we both spent reading over and discussing my characters and plot at length. Mom and Dad, you provided your support by discussing and giving input about my writing.

Thank you to my friends who have supported me along my writing journey. I wish to thank Green Beret, Tim, for providing me with assistance when writing about the Army and special forces. Your experience in the service proved to be helpful in creating the background for my character, Declan.

I wanted to thank my PA, Sara, for being so flexible and supportive. Lastly, thank you to the members of my street team for helping me promote and joining me at takeover events. I appreciate each and every one of you and look forward to continuing my journey as a writer.

# ALSO FROM BLUE TULIP PUBLISHING

BY MEGAN BAILEY

There Are No Vampires in this Book

BY J.M. CHALKER

Bound

BY ELISE FABER

Phoenix Rising

Dark Phoenix

From Ashes

BY STEPHANIE FOURNET

Butterfly Ginger

BY JENNIFER RAE GRAVELY

Drown

Rivers

BY E.L. IRWIN

Out of the Blue

BY J.F. JENKINS

The Dark Hour

BY AM JOHNSON

Still Life

Still Water

BY A.M. KURYLAK

Just a Bump

BY KRISTEN LUCIANI

Nothing Ventured

BY KELLY MARTIN

Betraying Ever After

The Beast of Ravenston

BY NADINE MILLARD

An Unlikely Duchess

Seeking Scandal

The Mysterious Miss Channing

BY MYA O'MALLEY

Wasted Time

BY LINDA OAKS

Chasing Rainbows

Finding Forever

BY C.C. RAVANERA

Dreamweavers

BY GINA SEVANI

Beautifully Damaged

BY ANGELA SCHROEDER

The Second Life of Magnolia Mae

Jade

BY K.S. SMITH & MEGAN C. SMITH

Hourglass

Hourglass Squared

Hourglass Cubed

BY MEGAN C. SMITH

Expired Regrets

Secret Regrets

BY CARRIE THOMAS

Hooked

BY RACHEL VAN DYKEN

Upon a Midnight Dream

Whispered Music

The Wolf's Pursuit

When Ash Falls

The Ugly Duckling Debutante

The Seduction of Sebastian St. James

An Unlikely Alliance

The Redemption of Lord Rawlings

The Devil Duke Takes a Bride

Savage Winter

Every Girl Does It

Divine Uprising

BY KRISTIN VAYDEN

To Refuse a Rake

Surviving Scotland

Living London

Redeeming the Deception of Grace

Knight of the Highlander

The Only Reason for the London Season

What the Duke Wants

To Tempt an Earl

The Forsaken Love of a Lord

A Tempting Ruin

A Night Like No Other

BY JOE WALKER

Blood Bonds

BY KELLIE WALLACE

Her Sweetest Downfall

BY C. MERCEDES WILSON

Hawthorne Cole

Secret Dreams

BY K.D. WOOD

Unwilling

Unloved

BOX SET — MULTIPLE AUTHORS

Forbidden

Hurt

Frost: A Rendezvous Collection

www.bluetulippublishing.com

