 
Pitching for the pitcher:

By Christine Wood:

Copyright © by C Wood 2020:

Any resemblance, to people, events, and places,

Written within the pages of this book is purely coincidental,

as this is a work of total fiction. All characters depicted in this work of fiction are 18 years of age or older, when anything sexual takes place.

This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book.

May not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would

like to share this book with another person, please purchase an

additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this, book and did not purchase it, or it wasn't purchased for your use only, then please return and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Feedback is much appreciated either good or bad, so I can fix errors:

Chapter 1:

Suzie Q and I, we are singing karaoke in the back garden, much to the annoyance of the neighbours. In fact, we've just finished entertaining them, with if I do say so myself, a blinding rendition of my theme tune, Penny Lane, a renowned tune by the fab four. Though why Suzie insisted it was my tune or in fact called me that, why I don't know? I never asked, but she knows I'm not from Liverpool nor called Lane, she is stupid and loud? I'm though Penny Daniels, twenty-four, very drunk and keeping the neighbours up... Anyway, it's not my fault they ask for more and so we sang it again, and we do it better than the four lads from Liverpool did, and no I'm not thinking of those lads, but ours Russell, Mark, Jeff and Royston, four old university friends of ours, who've just left with the threat of the police being called by the fuddy-duddy's next door.

What it's only... I look at my wristwatch and it's, oops our bag, it's three in the morning. No really, it's that late, or is it early? I guess it's an either or? Heck no wonder they are angry. I'd lost function of the watch to eye coordination at some point early in the night, not helped with the constant refuelling my mouth, with those brain damaging Bacardi heavy Mojito cocktails of Suzie's. Suddenly Suzie had a brainstorm, or was it a brain fart? Who knows when it happened, but it was definitely after drinking far too many of those self-same said Mojitos?

We'd, as you can guess, have been drunk all night at my 'Penny's-Purged-The-Perv-Party?' A very well-attended soiree I might add. I didn't know, nor did I care, what she was blabbering on about, because I was a little tipsy, but with the guests and the lads at last all gone, and we were supposed to be clearing away, but I'm singing again and singing this song made her dare me to do something stupid and feckless.

"Just for a laugh Penny Lane, go on do it for me please, please, pretty please, remember the New Year's resolution?" She begged, and I found the abandoned mic and looked at it like I had found Suzie's new sex toy. Yes of course I remembered it, it was written on my torso in permanent marker for two days, so drunk was I. I feel I am being led astray by Suzie. I remembered it alright, but because for those two whole days, that the bloody thing wouldn't come off. It was just about the worst resolution I'd ever made, actually the only one I had ever made, why make them, when I only ever did good things? The next song came on and I loved it, so with mic in hand and not a sex toy, I blast out my best Frank Sinatra impression ever, I sound like the Sex Pistols on downers though...

"New York, New York, so good they named it twice, New York New York, all the scandal and the vice, I love it. New York, New York, now isn't it a pity, what they say about New York City?" I had a sudden thought, I stopped singing and asked. "What do they say about New York City?" Told to shush again by Mrs Fuddy-Duddy, I remembered the time and turned it off. "Thank you and goodnight, Mr and Mrs Fuddy-Duddy." My parting shot to the woman who had ruined my party and was hiding behind her hideous curtains.

"I don't know Penny. Go and find out, then you tell me, I double dare you. Take up that weird job offer?" What was she like fourteen again?

I fell out of the tree last time she double dared me to do something, and I was the one who broke her bloody arm. I laugh as she takes the mic off me, and we go in search of the weird e-mailed job offer, complete with its tickets and hotel reservations. The job offer we thought was bogus, because it was just too good to be true and we all know if it looks too good, chances are it is too good. Much like the shrimp and prawn platter the supermarket who sold us it really cheap because it was closing. Yeah right how were we, drunk me and Suzie supposed to see those iddie-biddy date things? Apparently, it was way past its sell date, or so Lydia the guest who spent the night vomiting in the bathroom told me. I will be sued tomorrow when the other prawn and shrimp eating guests report us for food poisoning. Good job I hate shrimps and prawns, or I too would be so ill.

Finally finding it she decides for me, that yes this is a good idea, and despite my protests to the contrary, she says it's an even better idea than climbing that tree, to see the hunky topless gardeners in the neighbour's garden. Yeah right with you Q.

"Right, time to start then, we need to get you to the airport and see what New York has to offer you, in the way of hunks, studs and yes girl, sex. Take a chance Pen, besides what have you to lose, I dare you?" She said it, so I'm doing it.

Shit, I'm going to New York. Tell me again why did I say I do it? Ask me again after an eight-hour flight, with the worst headache ever. What I really need right now is to get some sleep or another drink. Hells teeth no, never ever again am I drinking any of Suzie's 'special' cocktails. She had helped me pack lord knows what, and I am off in a black cab. I'm headed for the airport and all before I could change my mind, or sobered up more like?

Oh yea of little faith Q, but yes, she did know me better than I knew myself. Q is the Yin to my Yang, and the best non-sister ever. I am her P and together, we are P and Q, and we know how to mind or P's and Q's. We pay attention to detail, or so the joke goes anyhow, well sometimes we do? Obviously, this isn't one of those times. The only person I had of any consequence left in my life is my Q, because my parents died doing their missionary work, their car took them to see God, via falling off a muddy mountain path, and down a mountain side. It happened when I was at college, thankfully I had not attended my parents church missions because it was examination time, so I didn't die with them. I shudder when I think about them. I only do that when I am totally rat arsed. God I'm too drunk to fly, because I am remembering them again.

Well I'm here now, and I am hung over. My head is aching, and I am waiting at the airport for a plane to take me either to my dreams or to a disaster, or better still to a week or two of shopping and selling my soul for the perfect shoe. Why am I here again I ask myself as I stumble to check in and smile like a lune at the pretty lady behind the desk?

"Hello, Miss Daniels, did you pack your own bag today?" I grin, and I think about it.

"Yes, I watched as Suzie Q packed," she looked at me and I grinned. "That's an old photo and I was having a bad day then too." She smiled, and my bag was on its merry way, too late to change my mind, so I head in through security.

I'm not sure how I got through, but I did, and I go to get a strong black coffee from the exclusive lounge thingy. Why did I do this again? That's right, all because Suzie Q, best friend and drinking buddy had dared me to do it, that is why. What's betting this bite's me in the arse, it normally does, as with anything done whilst drunk and with Suzie? I had done some pretty wild things, but not sexual things when inebriated, too many times and with some very bad endings. Usually it's me getting the bad end of a girlfriend's fist, thanks to Q making a play for their guys. Suzie, she had a thick skull and a very bouncy bottom, she gets up and walks away, me I am an apologetic friend, and so they pick on me not her. She normal sits and waits for me to smack them, then comes back 'to save me.'

I then look around to see if I am being watched and she is coming to save me this time? Damn alcohol kills my sensible side completely, Suzie must be permanently pie eyed, because she is never sensible. Oops I look down at my feet and I realise I still have my slippers on. Oh hell, please tell me I'm wearing underwear, I do a subtle quick check, and yes it seems I am. The shy girl in me must have put them back on when Suzie wasn't looking. Result, now to route through my hand luggage and put some shoes on.

Why had Q packed my waffle iron? I told her I wanted my curling iron? Flip, I then start to wonder what's in the big bag? Shoes are found, and the dead rabbits are back in the bag. Why do I listen to her, why do I always do something stupid with her? I mean this tops my stupid list though, and why did I do it, yep that's right because of yet another epic cocktail fuelled Q party, the one on New Year's Eve and that stupid resolution to be a daredevil man rider, hahaha right? I must stop home more, oh wait that was another one held at home. I need a better plan, or a new friend.

My New Year's resolution was to become a flirty vamp, and to have had sex at least once before the end of the year. Have a ball and live life properly, party and enjoy every opportunity thrown at me. Oh, and to stop being a workaholic with no social life, Q added that on for sheer stupidity. Simple then, just change my life completely. Could I even do a full three hundred and sixty degree, turn around? It couldn't be as bad as the life I was, at the time leading. I really need next year's resolution to be my learning to ignore Suzie and never drink with her again, or perhaps get a new friend?

I guess my flirty vamp thing had begun with me taking up the very kind offer of a flight and first class accommodation, all to pitch for the job that I cannot remember applying for, and one I really do not have the qualifications for. I will rephrase that, I do, sort of. I just think it's weird that they need me, a British female sports agent to represent an All-American baseball player, when I don't know a gnat's fart about the game? Then again, I am a quick study and I needed something to change in my life, because I was sad at home. Was I actually talking my drunk self into actually doing the weird arsed job? The job offer, weird arsed or not, couldn't have come at a better time for me. I had just broken up with my fiancé of just over a year, Garth Davis. What a perv he turned out to be in the end, and he was the reason for last night's impromptu drinking session. He was just another lying, crazy, male chauvinistic bastard.

My lack of worldliness, strict upbringing, and my weird parents are to blame for me levitating towards the prick called Garth, thanks to them my life wasn't that of a typical young woman. I was old before my time. I felt nothing, because as stupid as it sounds, I didn't know how to feel anything, my parents drummed that out of me at an early age. They didn't do emotions, and having had no love and kindness, nor anything akin to passion in my life, unless it was God related and then that was their passion not mine, it was simply endured by me for a peaceful life.

Life should be normal, but it wasn't easy, I learned to dismiss what was perceived by others as normal, as just another irksome hindrance. I had to explain all I did to my parents at school, and college, so they could make me see the light, and be a good godly girl. A girl who was dedicated to give my purity to my husband and be faithful to my parent's teachings and my church's wishes. No, I was not raised in a cult, however it seemed like it to outsiders, and Suzie.

I had no longing for anything more than what I had in my life, and I wanted to be a good wife to Garth, and good daughter to my parent's memory. A sane person would and could possibly see, there was a distinct lack of love in my life. Suzie tried to help, but being brainwashed is just that, it is a worse when it is a deep-seated brainwashing from birth, like mine was, and it takes some ridding of and I tried, but the doors slammed shut every time I tried to move to the dark side of my thoughts.

When I first met Garth, he told me he didn't do love, he liked me, but he didn't love me and stupidly I accepted this as my lot. I had put up with this from my parents all my life and he was the same, he was being God fearing and strict! That last year with him, it was at best strained and at worst boring, and not what I thought I'd signed up for when I agreed to marry him. Perhaps I had started to change when the ring went on and I was unaware the changes were happening. Who knows when it actually happened, the change in me, but I do know it got worse, before it started to get better with him, Garth, I think?

I'd guess I had been blinded by his charisma, charm and what I thought I would be getting, when we married, that body of his! What he was offering was I thought normal. It never crossed my mind that I was being brainwashed by him too, and I then realised the time spent with my parent was just their training me to serve my husband and be a good wife and mother. Nearing the end of our time together I suddenly, and without warning, started to wake up from a bad dream, but it wasn't a dream, it was my life and he had turned it into a nightmare and I had helped in my own grooming, by believing this was all I was worth, my parents taught me well and he honed their training, and I allowed it.

In the three years that we had been together, he had eaten away very slowly at everything good in my life. He began slowly moulding me into something to fit his requirements. That killer was last year for me it was the worst, because I hadn't had Suzie Quill in my ear telling me not to be stupid. She wasn't here, so his game plan was put into play all the drastic changes before she got back, it would be he thought, too late to change me when she came back. I'd always done the things that the key people in my life had told me to do, included in this is the stupid things the Q orders me to do, because I knew no better than to follow orders, after all I'd only replaced Mum and Dad's beliefs, with those of Garth. I'd simply switched up the puppet master, that was all. It hadn't always been bad though, things with Garth? No, it actually started out so very well too.

He like me was a believer in no sex before marriage, purity of both body and soul. Something which both my parents had taught me from an early age, that I was to be a good Christian, and it was expected of me to be moral and upright, and to abide by the strict Christian codes they lived by. I was to stay pure and be a virgin until marriage, without that I was a ruined woman and couldn't enter the gates of heaven. They instilled their values into my learning from an early age, because they were devout in their own beliefs. I went along with their ways and I did everything that they asked of me, as you do when you're a child. Pious Penny was the taunting name the kids at school gave me, and one I had for a long, long time, because I looked and dressed like a miniature nun. I think my colleagues do call me similar names, but behind my back these days. How did I get tangled up with Garth? I will tell you...

I'd found out from dating a few 'normal men', that most of them were all wired the same way, idiotic, with wandering hands, most were sex crazed morons and all of them had a one tracked mind. All of them thinking that having no sex before marriage was a joke, several saying well you don't buy a couch without sitting on it, or that you have to try before you buy. Buy what exactly? I wasn't selling anything, certainly not my purity and virtue? This was something that I found difficult to do, my having to explain to every man after we passed the first date stage, that I had decided to practice abstinence and that I was abstaining from sex before marriage. It was the way I was brought up, and no it was not a challenge, nor a joke and no I wouldn't change my mind no matter how big his dick was. Usually I ended up on my own, and normally after a tirade of their abusive and nasty comments! I found out to my utter shock, that if I didn't put out, I was a freak, a lesbian, a prick tease, or just simply a fucking frigid bitch. They wrongly assumed it was a given that if I went out with them and they had paid for a meal or drinks, this act of chivalry entitled them to a night in my bed.

I always insisted on going Dutch after the first few dates I had, it was less hassle and there was no mistaking my intentions, well not always of course, because there were a few who though just being at their table entitled them for dinner and benefits, a leg kick and if they persisted a smack with my foot in their nethers stopped them in their seats. They learned quickly that I may be pure innocent and church going, but I can kick the crap out of a horned devil with a hard on, a devil who doesn't take no for a no, my favourite nun at school, Sister Hortense, the Gardener of God was good at boxing, kick boxing actually, she learned this before answering her calling to God. So, ergo after those disastrous dates, I hated and mistrusted men for a long time.

So, when I finally met Garth through work, he was my boss's best friend, he seemed to be the perfect man for me. He was perfectly nice to look at, and lord had a body to die for, hey shoot me I was celibate, not blind! He was perfect in every way for me, because like me, he believed in everything that went with my lifestyle choices too. We went on quite a few dates, and he never once made a pass at me that way. Explaining that kissing and hugging were all he would do until he was married. I wouldn't have minded the petting that others did, that wasn't sex, plus it would have alleviated some of the pent-up tension I had looking at his body. That was kowtowed too and with a resounding no, so I had to get my own relief, even that he considered a sin! I kept quiet of my self-gratification, for fear of losing this gem I'd found. I perhaps wasn't as chased as I thought, I had urges to touch, look and have, but I held back with him, but gave in to my own relief and often.

I was, I thought, right in thinking that he was the perfect man for me, considering his consideration to my immediate needs were great. His warmth and affection were pleasing and just what I thought I needed. He'd take me to wonderful new places, and we did some fantastic things together all the time. He endeavoured to make special moments for us to remember: Be it a trip to Paris and sailing down the River Seine, walking arm in arm through St Peters Square, or a weekend of skiing at his Swiss chalet, I was spoilt and indeed cherished. What would our married life be like with him? He made me dream of romance and wild sex in these places, places when we were married, we would make mad and passionate love, once we were able, and with reckless and wild abandonment too.

I may have been led astray a little by Suzie at collage and uni, but I never gave or did anything sexual to any man, because deep down I was afraid of being sent to hell. I actually thought I was heading there anyway, after taking too good a note of Garth's well-kept body. I hoped and prayed that he was as energetic in his love making, as he was at everything else he did, that thought alone made the not touching him all the harder, but it also made the waiting all that more exciting. He looked like he would be a good lover, looking as he did, the same as all the romantic, good looking male lead actors, in any one of my hundreds of romantic films that I had amassed over the years. They were in fact my love substitute, which came in the forms of shiny silver discs, films about love, romance and there was nothing in them that either he or my parents approved of and even watching those would send me on the quick path to hell. Okay, I will admit that I wasn't that bothered about hell when I was locked in my room watching films, the risk was worth it.

I hoped he would be as good as the lead actors and I would get to do the things the girls in them got, the girls who were made love to! I hoped I'd learn about this thing called real love from my films, and they would be a teaching aid to my having fantastic unbridled, raw and emotional sex. I hoped I would feel the touch of a man and through those wonderful films, I hoped I would learn how to please him. I hoped after we were married, and after that first proper all-consuming kiss was had, that he would make me want to scream his name aloud, then I would claw at his back, shout, scream, tantalise and seduce him into giving me his all. Until that day I made do with the films, whilst I waited like a good girl, to ride the roller-coaster adventure I'd waited forever to take. I really thought he was the one to do all this for me. Stupid me!

All my other needs were taken care of, sorry I will rephrase that, they were in the most part. I did still have all that massive pent up sexual need, which he didn't take care of and seeing him daily made my imagination run riot, but he wouldn't entertain me. Even in a non-full-sex-sort-of-way, even that he wouldn't do. Therefore, I had to invest in my own friend for that and with the help of my non-judgmental neighbour Suzie, we purchased my purple rabbit called Bob, and after a few how to videos on a banned site on the internet were watched at Suzie's, Bob excited me that way and all the time, but this I had to hide away from him, it was still a temptation, one that I should not give into, but I needed that release. It was his fault. Him and that body.

I remember the time we almost did it one time, yes, we so very nearly came so close. We were in Paris, he was on a business trip, he was pleased with his deal and we'd both been drinking, and the passion almost got the better of us. But, and without a stitch of clothing removed, he stopped and went to his own hotel room. The next day he was angry at me for tempting him, I blamed Mr Pinot and Mr Grigio for that night. He was very mad at me and himself for days, having nearly crossed a boundary he couldn't cross until the band of gold and the words of promise and commitment had been uttered by his village vicar and in nearly doing so, he was ashamed of himself. Me, the temptress, who knew I had it in me? He never came close to doing that again, but I did see a different Garth that night and a damn sexy one too. I never had to fend off drunken passes again because he, sorry we, never did it again because he was an honourable man. Had my parents still been alive, they would have loved him, because he went to church every Sunday, and was so like them and their need to please the Lord God their master.

I had however stopped going to church when my parents died, and because I could at last think for myself. Garth never pushed me to go to his church, perhaps because I'd lost my belief in God, if I ever had a belief in him to begin with that is, they had I hadn't, so I never went with him. We were to be married at the church in the village where he had his country house, and after we were married, I would have to attend. Taking my place and sit alongside him, in the family pew. Did they still have family pews? I laughed inwardly, phew. I accepted his proposal just two weeks after he had made that slip. He asked me to move into his London and his home in the country with him, a year before our marriage, to see if we would be compatible.

I thought this would actually lead us to having sex, alas no, I still had my own room. He was devout in his beliefs that we would be virgins on our wedding night, great no sex was to be had, but I didn't push it. Then when I moved in, he slowly started to change me. Suzie was on her Asian and Australasian six month scouting trip, she was looking at expanding her business, to include the football players over there, so I didn't actually notice the big changes I'd unwittingly already allowed, she would have spotted them and made me stop and think.

Once we were living under the same roof, his roof, the first thing he changed was my wardrobe. The work clothes I wore were now tailored handmade suits with conservative blouses and shoes. Not really a bad thing actually, they were very smart. However, giving up my shoes was a killer blow because they were the next to be changed, as was my underwear, because it's far too sexy. This he found out I owned, no, not from looking at my body wearing it, no nothing as erotic or suggestive as that. No, he found out when his housekeeper, mad as hell at me already for asking her to wash my things, she took one look and she refused to wash them, so I was going to wash them myself, but no she couldn't leave it and she grabbed them to show him what I wanted her to wash.

"These Sir are the clothes of a hussy." She told him. "I am not soiling my washing machine, with the devil's temptations." Christ I was moving in with a freakier Christian than my parents and his maid for God sake, why I stopped with him when that happened, I did not know!

"Blood and sand, they do the job, they cover the tits and bits." That didn't go down too well, because using that sort of language wasn't in keeping for the new Lady of the Manor, she, (me) must never again be so uncouth. He told me off, and then when he looked at the offending items, he then realized what my underwear actually looked like, he was shocked, and I think horrified? It was to be changed, and my old things were to be given to charity. It was packed and waiting in the hall when I got home the next night. My sexy three pieces weren't going anywhere near Oxfam, they were far too sexy and too damn expensive. This should have set the alarm bells ringing and it did.

I rebelled and stored it in my bedroom at home, along with my fabulous to die for shoe collection, I loved my shoes too much to send them to the charity shop, which got my clothes and so they too were now with Suzie Q. Stopped too my boozy nights in or out with Suzie, she was back and yes, as predicted she freaked because I had turned into a fucking trophy Stepford wife. The controlling had grown quite bad, and for the past month it really was unacceptable, he even wanted me to get rid of my little car, as she was too sporty and not at all suitable for his wife. My film collection had joined my shoes, underwear and old life around at Suzie's, my fucking car would not fit in the sodding bedroom, because there was no space left in the damned thing.

My old life was now boxed away and hidden in my now much smaller bedroom. My film collection and the eminent loss of my car woke me up to the reality of life he was leading me into. I would never get to complete my bucket list, because I would be too busy with the life, he had mapped out for me. My list wasn't to see the Seven Wonders of the World before I died. No, it was to see the places in these now boxed away films that I had stored in boxes, in the storage locker that was my room. My life was also in cold storage. What was I going to do, go around to Suzie's and have a night wearing the underwear, shoes and watch a film or two and then go home to the master, where I was to spend my evenings reading and concentrate on self-improvement? Goddamn it, the man was a moron. I spoke various languages, had two damn good degrees under my belt and held down a fantastic job, improve on what?

With a month to go before our grand wedding, Garth had me escort him on a business trip to Paris. I pointed out to him sights that were, yes beautiful, but they had been used as locations in this film or that love film. He actually said romance was and is for fools, it was overrated and that I was to grow up and live in the real world, what the hell? There is love in the real world. In that moment I realised there would be no love in our marriage, and no matter how buff his body was, his brain and heart were both hard, empty vessels for business, there was no romance to be had because he didn't believe in it.

Bloody hell I am all grown up too, I am bloody twenty-four, not fourteen, and he was speaking to me like a child. I half expected him to chew my food or cut it up for me. He ordered all that I ate the whole weekend and until this trip, it hadn't bothered me. Now that my mind had been made up for me, that it was over and finding a less challenging way of finishing it, was making me very cranky. He spoke in horrendous French to the waiter, telling him I was useless. The stupid fool even after three years together, did he not know I was fluent in the French language, spoken and written? On reflection though why would he, I was never allowed to speak to people, unless they spoke to me. Then their conversations to me were quickly brought under his control. I'm angry, yes damn right I am, I am not a brain-dead moron, so why am I acting like one?

The strange things on the trip, they got even stranger. Our bedrooms had a connecting door, we usually had separate suites away from each other, to give temptation a wide path was his excuse. There had been a booking faux pa, so it meant there was just a connecting door between us. He spoke on the phone at odd hours to someone, on hearing raised voices I was concerned, so asked if everything was alright, was there trouble at work and did he need my help? He'd suddenly say he was sorry to the caller, he then put the phone down, shouted at me again as if I was a child and then he ordered me back to my bed. He screamed that I had just cost him a dearly, I was to stop interfering, I was just being nosy and rude and that I was to go to bed and think about improving my attitude and learn to be obedient and come to heel.

I was not a bloody dog, but he made me want to be one, a bitch. I really had an eye-opening weekend. Paris was the place where at last I finally started to live again. I realised I didn't want what he was offering any more and I needed to get out, but how would I set about ending it, because I'd seen his temper and may have been a little afraid? Grow a pair Penny and just do it, I kept telling myself that over and over until yes, finally I'd had enough and decided to end it when we returned home and not here, besides he had my passport and would make my life hell. Getting home was a relief. The day after I decided to seek out help and I went to discuss things with Bella Slocomb, my old university roommate and teacher of the wicked ways of sex to Suzie Q. She said if I wasn't feeling it, then yes, I should end it. She laughed when she first saw me in my new get up, asking if she could lend them, when she went to her themed nights. They would be ace as a schoolteacher's costume, simply add a cane, killer heels and she would be set.

Yes, I did know about sex, I just don't do the actual sex. Bella was a party animal, but after trying for years to set me up at university, she finally gave it up as a bad job. Garth actually liked Bella funnily enough, she was very likeable, her family were old money and she had impeccable taste, she knew the right people. So, he approved, ha, if only he knew what I knew. She had introduced me to Garth in the first place, her sister was seeing his best friend, Edward 'Ted' Meridian, who later became my boss too. She thought we would be compatible, because we were both odd balls, her words. I told her all about our horrid weekend in Paris where Garth and I, we had for the want of a better word, discussed our marriage contract. There were no discussions just a list of his demands, he actually told me what he expected and as they spewed from his mouth, I was shocked and horrified. When he passed me the actual written down version I wanted to hurl, that put the final nail in the marriage coffin. It was supposed to be a marriage, not a business deal.

I would provide two children as soon as it was possible. I would retain my own room and he would visit twice a week, or if he felt the need, he would ask the day before. Sodding hell, there would be no love, no cuddles and no spontaneity. How did that even work? Put a post-it-note on our bedroom doors. I think I want sex on Monday, Penelope here I have written a request in triplicate, one copy for you, one for me and one for the staff so she knows to have the sheets changed? What did I do leave a post-it-note on his bedroom door, I think I might need a fucking tomorrow, if you feel up to it, be ready? There would be no 'God I've to have you now moments' there would be no 'I need to have wild and wicked sex with you right now' times.

Where would the passion and romance be in that? All my dreams and fantasies, they died that weekend, three years of wondering what he would be like, what it would be like with him. I read it, not taking it all in really. Then, when he asked me to sign it and return it before our marriage, in just under a month, I was upset and angry. I had dreamed of passion and wild sex, not rules and regulations in a prison like marriage, oh hell were my dreams dashed. I knew what I had to do. I just needed someone to tell me, it was the right thing to do. I knew just the person Suzie Q, Bella was fine, but she was all about the money, and advised I marry him and do it for the money.

We had been busy at work and Ted was keeping us all behind to work late, so I stopped at the company apartment and after a few drinks with Suzie Q and showing her the contract, and telling her about the weekend trip to Paris, she was beside herself, not in sorrow, but in laughter. She was reading the contract between us, and as she read it she laughed, she actually thought I had done it on the computer to wind her up as a joke, she laughed so hard I thought she would have a coronary. She realised when I cried that it wasn't a joke, but his reality and my worst nightmare, then she went into Q ball mode, firing away and potting all the balls on the table, hitting them with force and deadly accuracy, each issue I had she potted away nice and neatly in a pocket. She put all the issues into perspective giving sound and good advice.

"Bloody hell Penny Lane, this is an iron clad contract to his own vanity, are you sure you want to churn out just two perfect trophy children? It's bad enough you've turned into a moronic trophy wife. When are you going to wake up and smell the coffee Penny? This isn't you. Yeah be a goody, goody virgin and that's good for you babes, but shit you should love the man you marry. You should have a mind blowing, sex session, at least once before you die. You're not going to get that with him. What's betting he's a wham bam, thank you done the job, now get to your room sort of guy and what's in it for you Pen? Nothing: the clothes, the house, the money, they are nothing Penny, not without love. God no, everyone needs love in their life at least once. No, you can't do this, it's too high a price to pay and for what Penny, the small family he's offering you? Shit girl you're twenty-four, look fantastic, have an amazing body, even if he makes you hide it under Dior and Chanel suits. What are those things on your feet, bloody hells bells are they Hush Puppies?"

"I thought it was safe and he would be safe, you don't have to have everything, and he wants a family, his family is huge Suzie. He just wants what they have, so do I, I want a family Suzie. It's alright for you, you don't know what it's like to be alone, you have brothers and a sister, cousins and all the things that come with family, I've never had that."

"I have you're right, but what he's offering you in return for that is so wrong, you will be in a loveless marriage. Do you want to bring children into that world Pen? Don't do it, it's a mistake. You know you need love, your Mother and Father never had it, they loved themselves and God and sometimes had a minute to preach at you! What's that film you watch, Truly Madly Deeply? That's what you need some of that Penny. Don't settle for this crap, you know it's not what you want. You just needed me to tell you it was alright and it's more than alright. I expect you to put your foot to his under used balls, give them a kicking and give him back the ring that ties you to him.

It's like the one a bull wears in his nose, so the farmer can drag him here there and everywhere, giving it the occasional smack to control, and be pulled along by it, to a field to shag his prized cows and only when he sees fit, it keeps the damn bull tethered and under his control, he's using that fucking huge rock to control you and letting the world and his sister know you are his and under his control, so get it off that finger and back in his clammy hand, lose the control freak and take back your life." Wow what a rant.

She was right, I'd had parents who were truly, mad and deeply in love with God. I felt I was a spare wheel in their life, a cumbersome mistake, I think they would have happily not had me and devoted their time to reading the good book and saving souls on their many missions. The Garth thing, she hit right on the head. Another glass of wine is had.

"I know you're right, really I do. You're right of course. Bella says I can divorce him if it doesn't work out, but that is wrong too. Marriage is for life, so I need to tell him were through. Yes, I'm going to tell him and now before I change my mind." I grabbed my keys and set off to see him.

I would tell him it was too irritating, too business like. I want the whole nine yards, hearts and flowers, shit I wanted love. I left Suzie in the flat and drove straight there. I pulled up outside the house and it was in darkness. Shit he wasn't here; I'd bottle out if I went back, so I decided to wait here for him to return and end it tonight and then leave. I opened the door and could hear strange whimpering noises coming from upstairs, he'd locked the dog in his room again, and so I went to let her out.

Wow, how I wish I hadn't opened that door, my door, the bloody door to my own bedroom. I was expecting to let Betty his dog out, not see the bitch I did see. Bella, and in full school teacher mode, dressed exactly like me in a tailored get up, exactly like mine but bugger it, she actually came complete with a cane and heeled shoes. She was canning Garth raw, his arse was red and hanging out of what I could only describe as cheek less, black leather school pants. He was dressed in a school uniform and fuck me what a sight, his non-too-shabby-dick was hard, and it was in his hand. He was relieving himself all over my pure Egyptian cotton sheets urghk. His face didn't change as he saw me stood there, he just accepted her instructions as she whipped him.

"Take the stick out of your arse and join us Pen? I'll allow him to pleasure you properly and just the once before you marry. I mean really pleasure you because there won't be many times after marrying my favourite pupil, that you're serviced that way again. When you're married, he will keep that performance strictly for me, the mistress and his mistress in every sense of the word."

He stopped, smiled and he patted the bed for me to join them. He's now sat on his knees and he looked a right cock, for want of a better word. She was patting his head and telling Garth to kiss her hand and he did. He was kissing her hand and began whining like a child, and when I refused his repeated pat on the bed to join them, he let out a screech and like a petulant child, he moaned to his mistress.

"Mistress she doesn't want to join us, am I not worthy? Please punish me for being a bad boy, please punish me, I need a hard punishment." Was I really watching this unfold? Where were the hidden cameras? I looked around and urgh, they are filming the antics on my bed too. Then she did something that made me heave, she flicked the cane over his dick. He yelped and asked her to do it again and she did, repeatedly. She flicked the cane again and again, leaving welts on his dick and he came as she hit it the last time. I was, and I am, transfixed to the spot, watching as she allowed him to pleasure himself, she patted his head as if he was a small child and was doing a good thing.

"Put on the uniform I had him buy you, the grey one and wear the pink blouse, bought to remind him of his mistress, when he has to look at you his wife, he will picture me in it, and remember what he has to look forward to in class. Today though, he's been a very naughty boy at school, he pleasured himself whilst I visited him there, all without my prior permission and he knew that isn't wasn't allowed and he needed my written permission to touch himself, he needs to be punished.

I'll allow you to come inside her, ride her hard and take her to a heady release, you will appreciate me better after her. Would Master Garth like to fuck your virgin tonight? I may join you and pleasure her too?" I panicked because I'd seen what she could do. He clapped his hands together. He was very excited for his treat. God, and his dick was hard again.

"Err, no thanks you pair of fucking perverted creeps. I. What. No Bella, I don't think so. Fuck right off the pair of you, as to the sex?" I stammered my words and lost my train of thought looking at his dick. "Oh my God, I don't want it like that or with you. Why do this with her, her of all people she's my friend Garth?" He was all business like again and his relief was now all over my bed.

"This is just something Bella, and I do from time to time. I've needs, and part of those needs are pleasing my mistress. The needs I require from you are that you are to be a virgin on our wedding night. I'll be the one who takes it, as the vessel to take my seed must be pure, to make sure that my children are prodigies, she therefore she has to be pure. I couldn't believe my luck when the mistress said she had a virgin bride for me. Who was pleasant enough to look at, for a while, a woman who would satisfy my heir requirements of two children, the heir and a spare, any more would be a drain on my time, time better spent with the mistress." So even his children they were to be part of his weird business deal?

"Oh, so sex is alright for you before marriage? So, your dick, yes that thing flapping by your leg. It's fine for your seed to travel through that," I point at Bella, "then enter me through the same dick that has been in her much used vagina, which is far from pure Garth? I don't think I led you to believe I would be happy to share, I don't think I'd like to share and certainly not with her, you see I know where she has been, thanks a lot. So, thanks Garth, but I won't be going there now, or any time ever, it's never happening sex with you.

Nope, not when that, has been in her. I know the men she has shagged and had up there, the strangers on trains, busses, night club toilets and all free of protection. You both disgust me. Have my things sent to my home? These give to the mistress. She looks like she's earned them." I threw the ring at him and the keys to his homes. Yes, and what a way out, thank you guardian angel and the half bottle of wine for giving me the courage to come here tonight. Yes, I was finally free.

"The mother of your children Garth, she would have to be a brainless moron, there you go, marry Bella the perfect description, you did after all sleep your way to the degree you got. Thank fuck I woke up and the smelt the coffee, which was so easy once Suzie showed me the way to go and I got the stick out of my arse alright and just in time too, no wedding, no nothing, you pair of sick bastards deserve each other and yeah for me, purity wins the day." I turned and walked away.

Chapter 2:

I spent the next week smiling like a Cheshire cat at the thought of the narrow escape. My things were boxed and sent to my home. The one Penny lived in. After my parent's death, I couldn't face the house, because there were far too many bad memories there. Ted however, he allowed me to stop in the company flat, until I found a suitable place to live, after Garth put a substantial amount of money in my bank account, for 'relocation costs.' Garth had paid me to shut up. I had considered not taking it but hell, he could afford it and I was so sure some charity could do with it. I wouldn't be spending it on me because it would be taking dirty money.

I would clean it by giving it away to charity. I decided I was going to be concentrating on my job. I am after all a damn good sports management executive here, here at the top London firm, Meridian Sports Management, having also a legal degree and a business studies degree from Suffolk University, those two beauties helped me no end in landing this lush job. I'd recently qualified as a solicitor, and my specialities are contract law and employment issues. I do like to study. I represent football players in the most part but have a couple of boxers and a few cricket players and I've two Olympic rowers and a few swimmers on my books. My area of expertise is to negotiate player contracts with both the club and sponsors. I've a knack of finding the smallest hidden clause or discrepancy in any contract and adding in my own, my contracts are iron clad and have no such loopholes.

With the right deals, our clients get to earn themselves, and my firm, a good living, in most cases it allows them to train and live. With the Olympics coming up in London, we had recruited a few more athletes, and they too are eager to gain sponsorship. I for my part am able to do this easily, because over the past few years I've acquired a network of people, whom I can call upon. I've been working here for just under three years and I'm too good at what I do, to get rid of, I've got the edge nobody else here has, and my clients need me, so I couldn't just walk away. Not that I would if I could, but I may have very little choice soon, especially if this petty work place bullying continues. I'd leave tomorrow, if I could take my personal clients with me, that however will never be allowed to happen because my contract with my employer is a ball breaker. I can't set up in this business in the London area, due to a conflict of interest clause within said contract, and can't take my clients with me, because they'd signed my contracts keeping them here.

However, dealing with my boss, Garth's best friend, is grating my last nerve. I decided I would have to put up with it for a while longer, or until Ted finds a legal way of firing me, or until he breaks me, and I quit. He'd made working there with him and for him, near on impossible. Why he had the urgent need to get me out of there is a mystery? Perhaps it's because I knew of both his and Garth's lifestyle choices, and if that snippet were to get out, it would make them both the laughing stock they were. So, I figured that they needed me gone, and soon.

He's made it damn near on impossible to do my job, with all the nit picking crap he had me doing. It was a task he actually seemed to be enjoying, and it had been going on for the whole two weeks since the split. The delight he seemed to have when he'd given me all the crappy jobs imaginable. Ranging from giving me junior office workers' tasks filing and shredding and doing the mail run. There was the delight of bringing his coffee and collecting his dry cleaning, and shock horror? I put up with it, I was now an expensive office junior and when that ploy didn't work?

He really pissed me off when he did the very worst thing possible involving the girlfriend, Stella Slocomb, she of the 'Slocomb Sluts Club', she too could do things to make your toes curl, even with her sister and on the several occasions I'd had the misfortune of witnessing their incestuous liaisons. It turned my stomach, and I'd go as far as to say they are born to first cousins. Great I'm mentally washing my brain with bleach and wire wool, to get that image out of my brain. I can't do that, watch as she ruins their finances and careers.

He gave all my clients to his dumb bitch of a girlfriend, all my best and contracted clients. I'd found these players and then I worked at getting them their own niched sponsors and finance people for their particular sport. All that was going to be ruined and just like that my edge was gone, because when he did that, he won. All the fight drained from me, the need to be the best and do the best for client and firm. It now seemed like an epic drain on my time. Why should I bother to make these great deals only for her to ruin them? Even my edge is a joke now.

Suzie says this thing I have, this edge, once I've have good sex it will change, when I lose my virginity I will revert to being just Penny Daniels and I will lose my killer instinct and strength I have, much like Samson did when he lost his locks? Apparently, Suzie thinks that my being a virgin makes me more focused? She was a fool, my clients are smoking hot, so I had to put a lot of focus in, but none of my clients had that thing I seemed to crave.

I don't even know what that thing is! I just know I have never had that butterflies in my stomach feeling when I met any of my suitors, or clients come to think of it, none made me lose focus and none made me want to drop my knickers either. I've never met anyone who made me feel like, 'God I've to have him and I need him right now' and doubt after all the time spent trying, I ever would. Bella and Suzie both tried and failed miserably, and all through the years at university. Failing to set me up to be claimed, because I never felt 'that way' about anyone, besides I also have a very strict no mixing business and pleasure thing going on, so none of the super-hot sports hotties stood a chance either!

Yeah, right! My dreaming of finding that wild pleasure and having it is rampant now, but it was a no to doing it with anyone I worked with or friends of theirs. I reverted back to type, so the old rules were still in play. I've never had to take a time out to try out, because I was not a paid-up member of the slut club. Get me, an American sports analogy being used, that must have been in a romantic film I'd watched, and then I wondered if I ever would make out and lose it? Then again did I want to after all the hassle with Garth? For God's sake I had spent years being someone's puppet, did I really need another three years with a dick head, like the last one? The simple answer, no!

The whole keeping-my-virginity-thing, it was always at the back of my mind and now I wonder what is so special about keeping it? Would there be anyone that was worthy of such a gift, it was a much thought about occurrence lately. Perhaps I should just pick a guy up and just lose it, just to stop myself from focusing on it? The kick boxing nun once told me that my heart would let me know when I'd found the right one. She said I would know for definite that I'd found and had the perfect first kiss when my heart stopped for what seemed like an eternity, an eternity she promised me would only last a moment, but what a moment it would be. I'd had enough kisses to test her theory, but not as yet I've not had that perfect kiss. I've kissed a fair number of frogs and toads, some of whom came complete with warts and all. Yuck.

However, my toe-curling kiss has not yet been had, but now I live in hope. I had thought Garth would eventually fit the bill because he made me feel cherished, his kisses were, I thought sweet and nice, but there are no toe curling, breath stopping kisses. Stupidly I thought he was saving them until we married. I would never find out if what I had waited all that time to get, was in fact going to be that one toe curling moment. I know from what I saw he had the equipment, but no he'd kissed her, and he had used his dick playing with her and atop of all that, he was a liar. Everything was a bloody lie and a waste of over three years. I think he was just my safe option, and in the end the wrong option.

Then two days ago, and unexpectedly, I received an email from Hart and Co, an American sports management team, based in New York. You have to love Google, my gossiping best friend, second only to Suzie. Through the wonders of the web, I found out that their set up is huge. The job offer, it shocked me that it was a good job offer too, I was to be a personal account manager for just one of their clients, and I would be earning triple what I do now. The American sports industry is nothing like the English sports network, first of all the country itself is massive and secondly the amount of money their sportsmen and women earn is phenomenal too. The client they needed me to sort out was one Benjamin 'Lordie' Lord, a professional baseball player, whose contracts with his team, and two of his sponsorship deals are up for renewal.

He has been holding out for a better deal, but his current management team were not as on the ball with him as they needed to be, and the sponsors did not want him damaging their good old family image. He'd been in the newspapers a lot, and for all the wrong reasons, late night parties, various women and then there was the explicit pictorial evidence of him being a party animal, mostly with those same women, all this and more were the things ruining him, his name and his career. To top it all there was an arrest for drunk and disorderly conduct, it made his bad boy image all the more believable. All in all, this bad press and publicity were doing him no favours.

My job would be to negotiate on his behalf new contracts and find new sponsors, ideally, I noted in his file, he wants to transfer back home, to LA, home of the LA Lions. They will not entertain buying him in his current state of mind. It seems I have to re-invent the party boy and bring him back, reformed. His management team in New York seem to have failed miserably and he's out of control. I know very little about baseball apart from it was similar to the game of rounder's, which I loved at school, but over paid, over sexed, over everything sportsmen. Those, those I know only too well and how to deal with them. I snap out of my alcoholic pre-sleep daze and ask again, 'what am I doing here in the airport?'

That's right I'm taking that leap of faith thing, grabbing my moment, and I'm doing it now. So, with a fortnight's holiday booked, I'm in departures waiting to board a plane. Suzie Q had looked at the email again and she convinced me that this seemed to be a fun thing to try. After a few more drinks and a re-read of the email, I was dared to do it and stupidly, I did. My head is still aching from the excess of Bacardi and mint in my system, and because of Suzie's killer, yes, killer Mojito Kickers, I am sat here with a headache from hell and I am left wondering when that common sense thing I have will kick in, or has it died like my career? My fuddled head and errkie barf breath, can attest to the fact I'm dying, in fact I'm looking like an extra in Walking Dead.

I fire up my laptop and type his name into Google. He has been a bad boy, a good-looking bad boy too, but only in the past seven months, so why not before? I did a further delve into his past, and I am faced with an endless stream of models and starlets on his arm, but they are never with him for more than one or two dates. His type, from what I can see? He doesn't have one, as there are blonde haired women, brown haired women, redheads and women of all nationalities, though there are a few blonde Victoria's secrets models, blonde does seem to be a front runner.

There have been fights too and he has, it seems been papped slugging it out with the paparazzi in a few of the pictures. One of these filmed fights was the reason facing the drunk and disorderly charge. I read the file repeatedly, and I'm convinced he isn't worth the hassle. I'm already thinking what could I do, that his teams over in America have not already done for him? My flight is boarding, so grabbing my bags and coffee I disappear through to board my plane. I am shown to my seat and I am a little overwhelmed, this is the ultimate in comfort. I fully intend to grab some much needed sleep...

The first-class cabin is wonderful, and I love the individual areas, not just the sheer luxury, but also the privacy of working and being in my own space, I should work, I need to work, but the Advil has not kicked in yet. I settle in, putting away my bags and laptop. Looking around at my fellow travellers I spy a couple of executives, two portly women, honourable by the sound of their voices, yes definitely silver spoon people, and a famous pop star from the eighties, my chosen era, now had it been Paul Young he would have been pushing me off his lap. I settle in for the flight. An hour into the flight and I'm fed and watered with the rest of the cattle. I'm now finally ready to start reading Ben's file properly.

I note he'd been out injured with an arm problem sustained eight months ago, a rotator cuff injury, in his pitching arm. Common enough with pitchers, from the research I had gleaned, again from my good friend Google. He had made a quick recovery in just six weeks and then the drinking began. I need to read his medical file. I need to know does his team want him still and or, does he still want to go home? Getting his life and image back to pre-injury would be an improvement! I read up on what it is he needs, what he could lose and what was in it for me, other than earning millions?

I make notes, backing up my research because some of this is a little daunting. Let's face it, I'm being interviewed for the bloody job of a lifetime, I at least need to know something, or look like I know something about baseball. He earns a vast amount in wages and his sponsorship deals are good earners, but I see there is plenty of scope for improvement, and with his good looks, he needs to be in modelling too. He currently is sponsoring various sports shoes, cars, grooming products and sports drinks. I write a list of information required and then I need to see the man himself.

I'm offered champagne, but I politely refused and asked for an orange juice and more painkillers because my head is aching far more now. All the facts and figures are doing nothing to help rid me of my hangover or my self-inflicted headache. This research is bringing forth a plethora of problems that need to be dealt with, a headache added to because I needed to dive deeper into his background and need to have other information to hand. I am opting though, to do it with a clearer head when I land. I grab more sleep, after I'd taken the pills and the cold orange juice. I am awakened with yet another ice-cold fresh orange juice and black coffee, excellent. We land after breakfast has been served and eaten.

I gather my things together and with customs done, and with my luggage collected, a lift is sought, and finally found. I am then taken by the car service they provided, to the Plaza Hotel, right opposite Central Park. They show me to the suite they have booked for me. When the nice man shows me my rooms, I swear I stand in silence as I hand him a twenty.

He leaves with a smile, then when I am alone, I am hit by the suite's luxury. My next stop is the New Yorkers Stadium, his present team, and I need to be there quickly. I shower, unpack and change into the grey suit, pale pink blouse. I look business like and orderly. I'm wearing my favourite Jimmy Choo's, with their five inch heels, patent leather greys, if you know me you know I would sell my soul for the perfect shoe, and I did regularly. I'm looking forward to hitting the stores here and parting with some of my well earned money, because New York and shopping, it doesn't get any better.

I pick up my briefcase and handbag, then check for my purse and that I have my money and cards. Then I finally make sure all my electrics and gadgetry, is charged and before I leave my suite I check that my pass for the stadium is in there too. I head for the lift and then out to see the place that is New York City. The concierge hails me a cab, though I'm sure I could walk, and most certainly I could jog, but as I need to arrive rested, and looking for the place with only half an hour spare, is too much to do, especially as I still have the damned headache from hell.

I pull up, pay and gasp as I see the size of the building, the stadium is huge. I'm to meet his management team here, as they are already in discussions with the team, which consists of a public relations guy and someone from legal and the head of security and the team owners right hand man. This meeting needs to go well for him, he needs to be back on track and quickly, as his life seems to be a mess. I show my pass and I'm escorted to the meeting room. Where we either stand or sit waiting for something to happen, when suddenly a man in a smart expensive suit looks me over and instantly, I don't like him. He has shifty eyes and he looks like a snake oil salesman, a cheap hoodlum in a good suit.

"Welcome Miss Daniels, or can I call you Penelope? I'm so sorry there has been a delay, their team are having some difficulties, and we are in here for another half an hour. I'm Bob Howarth, team lead negotiator." I shake his hand.

"I'm pleased to meet you. That will be better for me, actually are Mr Lord's medical files available?" He looks at me oddly and he has one of his assistants pass me the files. "Can I sit at the back there and read this? Also, the facts and figures your office messaged me are they all up to date?" He nods and then speaks.

"Hell yes, this is an important negotiation and we dropped the ball with Ben, or rather Miss Walsh did, his last personal management representative." Really, he's blaming a poor girl for their management failings. He definitely is a snake oil salesman, his attitude stinks, he's lying, and I hate liars.

"Given that his behaviour spiralled out of control more than seven months ago, she wasn't the only one to drop the ball. My personal clients are watched and spoken to on a weekly basis, daily should they need it. You can't blame this one on just one scapegoat. Your whole team, hell the company, who by the way he pays a small fortune to, to best represent his interests not just their own, they have let him down the most, but you as his lead agent and council have hurt his chances the most. You failed him by allowing this farce to carry on as long as it did. To me he seems to have been treated merely as a cash cow for your company, this was very shoddy workmanship and one that needs redressing as soon as possible. Your whole company has failed this client, not just one girl and as top dog, take some responsibility for your own failings." He frowns and allows me to study the file. I am tough and mouthy when doing my business deals, did I not tell you that?

I get out my paperwork, my laptop and iPad and study. I note the clinic he was in for the injury, the doctor's notes, and several other things to pick up and run with. He's in fine medical shape, fully fit and active. All his physicals were passed, all stamina tests are top of the line, including all blood work and fatty acid ethyl esters and ethyl glucuronide, hair strand tests, which measure the most minuscule amounts of alcohol in his blood, they are all less than twenty units in the past six months? So, I ask myself what's his game, his blood work says he doesn't drink?

Boy, mine must be way higher than that in any given week, because of the amount of schmoozing of sponsors I've to do, it's a work hazard. Then most nights there's the half bottle of wine I drink just to wind down at the end of a stressed-out workday. I'd be very shocked if my test were so low, yet he's the one supposed to be an alcoholic, maybe I'm the one with the problem, but then again, I'm not the one faking being drunk, but I need to find out why he is?

"Mr Howarth, do you have his personal file and your public relations file please?" His assistant passes me the files. I read, I take notes and Google his hometown's newspaper in Culver City. I go back to the week before his injury and scan forward, interesting. I look at his personal file compare and make notes. I look up and scan the room there are twenty people here, oh lord overkill or what? The other recruits are chatting and drinking coffee. I have to wonder if all this is real, I think I've managed to find out what started his problematic behaviour, and all in half an hour. I also know that there will be no easy fix, not to mend a broken heart, well there is, it's called time and it's not going to be instant, and certainly not as quick a heel as his rotator cuff was.

I listen to the chatter as I take notes; the majority are only here under sufferance and have no need to be here. This is all to make the company maybe look good. All these people are here for the one client, hell three or four of them are just office boys. Several who are here, simply want to be with their families instead of with this overpaid Jock, but they were told to be here or there is the door. I laugh as two of the lads have never actually met him and are hoping to get his autograph. Oh, so professional Hart and Co. I need to some delving, because something isn't feeling quite right about this mess. Looking across at Howarth on his phone, I see he is scowling at me and arguing with whoever on the other end, I sit back and wait.

There is a sudden flurry of activity as the team's legal staff head in, another twenty people, that's a little overindulgent on the staff folks don't you think. I put the files back and in order, then take out my pad, pen and get ready to take notes. Ben joins the team scanning the room. He looks at me, actually he searched me out and then watched me and I look intently back, he's a nice looking man. Six feet four, a hundred and eighty-ninety pounds, he's definitely someone who is nice to look at, with his dark eyes, and the hints of blonde and copper running through his mousey brown hair are nice to look at too, the devil is in the detail and I like his details, and he's well-dressed too. I snap out of my ogling of the man, after checking that my mouth isn't drooling. Yes alright, he's flawlessly drop dead attractive and he takes a seat.

The meeting is finally under way and he looks hung-over. I listen as they deliberate his future, whilst the man himself, he takes very little interest in the meeting! I listen as they talk over how to resolve the problem. I note his gaze as it travels to my legs and follows them up my body. I cross my legs and I note his eyes are now peering at me, he's watching everything I do. I think not Romeo. I shift the position of my legs to be under the table, hiding them with my bags, he grins as I do so.

They are all offering up their solutions on how to solve the media storm his bad act behaviour has caused. Given his tests say he isn't the drinking, then why is he sitting here making out he is, and I have to wonder what is he playing at? He's genuinely looking worse than I am and damn it I'm quite hangover. As my eyes scan across his body again, they scan up to his elbow, which rests on the table where it is propping his head up and he's looking in my direction. Damn it, he catches me ogling him, again.

"We need to get him involved in the local children's charities, hospital visits, school visits." He sniggers. I note the legal team spots this too and I smile and shake my head at him.

"You darling, you with a pretty smile and pink blouse, think this is a joke?" Addressing the room, the man who made the comment is Mr De Witt, he looks at me too. I stand slowly like the teacher has caught me cheating in a test, and I'm being busted in front of my peers. I smooth down my skirt and I launch at the poor man.

"I'm nobody's darling Mr De Witt: I'm Ms Daniels, Penelope, or Penny, and yes I think it may well be and one hell of a joke, a big joke too, but given the billable hours sat around this table, it's a damn expensive joke, and I for one am not sure saving Mr Lord, his career and the man himself, is even worth the hassle of trying to. I've been on a flight for eight hours, after a heavy night of drinking and celebrating with clients and friends, not too damn professional of me I know, but this meeting for me was a last minute thing. Still here I am, working and being professional and giving the problem, your damn problem Mr De Witt darling, my full attention unlike your client and player. I might add I've travelled a hell of a long way to help in the saving of your sorry arse. Mr Lord, this is no laughing matter, yet you seem to find it amusing? I still can't fathom out why I'm here, when your client and your player, it would seem is still hung-over from an evening with Jack and Daniel. Why go to all this bother if he doesn't want help? Really what is the point in all this?" I head for the door with my bags and laptop packed.

"Well, Miss Daniels you don't want the job then?"

"Oh, it was a serious job offer then Mr De Witt? It just seemed to me to be one big fat waste of time. Why do you all have so many bodies here, just to help one drunken arse get all better?" He looks amused, so too does Mr Lord, who grins as I head for the door. "No, I don't like wasting my time, its precious and irreplaceable, can you give me back the wasted hour I have sat here, whilst we waited for him to peel his drunk arse out of some girl's bed? I was here in plenty of time, so too should he. Mr De Witt, you can't fix someone who doesn't want help and someone who is hell bent on wrecking his career all on his own.

I'm sorry to say his drinking and out of control behaviour was caused by something he couldn't have predicted nor done anything about." They both looked at me and were shocked, Ben suddenly stops grinning and looks at me. "As for helping him, get him into anger management right away, let him be photographed actually getting help for his problems, and get him to see a shrink. Isn't that what all you Americans do, throw obscene amounts of money at a stranger, and expect them to cure you, or not as is the case, most of the time? They get richer, you grow poorer and all the crap is still there inside you, only now you have a fancy schmancy name for it and it only cost you a grand per useless session, he gets rich and you get to spout shit for an hour.

My preference would be talking to a tramp in the park and give him the money. The tramp, or down and out Mr Lord, he may give you better advice and help stop you Mr Lord, feeling so sorry for yourself with your shitty attitude to life, and it could be a good life. I may add, if it wasn't for your determination to wreck it, no you seem to be intent on throwing away with your 'oh-woe-is-me-attitude' thing you have going on. You come across as a spoilt child, and the public out there, all they see is there he goes, just another over paid jock, with more money than Trump, there he is, look at him spending big and wasting money, the money he spent on that meal would feed me and my kids for a months, and there he is tipping big boobed girls with what his normal fans have to work all month for, its them you are letting down, this teams fans and yours too.

Mr Lord's 'I need to feel sorry for myself, nobody knows my pain' thing he seems to have going on needs to stop. Really you need to bloody well grow up. And I might add, it's really quite childish to expect everyone here to be working on their day off, when clearly you don't give a flying fig about throwing away your goddamn near perfect life. Mr De Witt, he hasn't got a problem that he can't fix himself, he's angry at something he could have no control over, not unless he was the drunk driving the car. I don't think you were, were you Mr Lord, because that's what this is all about, and his reason for his throwing himself a seven-month pity party for himself and his faux friends and hangers on? Is sorrow and grief and rage." I think I may have overstepped a boundary or two.

"Now, how did you work that out, got any facts or are you just pontificating?" Ben is now looking at me and is livid. I may have hit a sore point, and it really wasn't professional of me at all, but my hangovers back with a vengeance. Mr De Witt pushes me again to explain.

"Research, plain and simple. I did a simple background check, not pontificating at all, though I do deal with enough pontificating arseholes in this business. Usually they are the ones who don't know their arse from their elbow, nor know anything about client's needs, and are people who are in it for what they can get out of it." I look in Howarth's direction. "It was simple research, I looked at all the clippings in his local paper from a week before he returned to recuperate, and it was all there.

An article about a local returning sporting hero, back in town and attending his former sweethearts wedding. According to the article, the same girl whom he left behind to come here, it read like Mr Lord preferred to come here rather than sign for the LA Lions and be with her. He was at the time wanted by both teams, which is now a funny point of interest, considering both teams are interested in signing him again. I presumed staying at home would have allowed their relationship to continue, so being dumped she found love with his best friend and he hated it." I figured blown that interview. I was way out of line, and I couldn't tell you why or when this meeting turned into the Penny show and tell, but it had?

"Miss Daniels, you did yourself a lot of homework, but did you also do a follow up on the marriage?" Ben now spoke, I simply watched his dark and stunning eyes stare angrily at me.

"Yes, I did. Their death was very tragic, I believe they died in a road traffic accident at the start of their honeymoon. Yes, as I said although deeply tragic, there was very little you could have done about it Ben, you have to stop blaming yourself. I know it must have been hard on you, but what could you do? Clear the roads every step of the way to their honeymoon?

Could you have stopped the drunk getting in the car? Could you have stopped either of your friends getting in the car at that precise moment they did, ten more minutes saying goodbye may have saved them, but you are not God and are not to blame for any of it. Either way it was some sort of sick joke him up there pulled, but they died instantly and together, they lived the rest of their lives together as their vows said they would, they had their time, and as hard as it is to believe, that's all the time that was allotted to them.

Do you hope to waste some more of your allotted time by spending yours being a drunken arse too? Seek help yes, but in something other than the contents of a Jack Daniels bottle. You're alive: walking, talking and with the ability, should you so choose to use it, to live a good life, so be grateful for that, and don't waste your tears on something you had no control over. Yes, you have the right to be annoyed and angry for your dead friends, but hells teeth man, grow up. You need to get a grip and carry on. Life is for the living, for the here and the now. Things and people change, all the goddamn time, isn't it time you did?

My advice comes free, get it together and stop wasting your obvious great talents Mr Lord, or is your head so far up your own arse that you think these forty or so people sat here, have little else in their lives or that they have nothing better to do with their weekend than to be here trying to sort your sorry mess out? One you alone created, do you think they want to be here instead of at home, with their families, whilst you carry on being an overpaid party boy? Instead of the self-pity thing you have going on, try to be a trained athlete you are. Start by looking more interested in saving your own sorry arse, you are an arse. Goodbye and good luck you're all going to need it."

I head out the door that felt soul searchingly cleansing for me. I think Mr Lord however, may think I'm a pontificating moron. I had a crappy job any way, and I certainly didn't need a new crappy one. God that was embarrassing, the more I think of how I ripped into him and had little or no feelings for his dead friends, I realise what a fucking cow I was. I walk back to the hotel through Central Park. I wonder if there is a Central Perk Café, as seen in 'Friends' I will have to take look? I've never been here before, but it has a few films from my bucket list, places.

I'm walking through The Central Park and enjoying it. Serendipity was filmed on an ice rink here, You've Got Mail, When Harry met Sally, Enchanted, Two Weeks Notice, Kate and Leopold and my favourite, Hannah and Her Sisters, they were all filmed right here, with many, many others. I lose myself in here for two or three hours, easily done when I reminisce about true love, and mushy stuff, lord I need someone to fall in love with, I want and need someone to sweep me off my feet and carry me away. My phone is now full of photos. I'd spend a pleasant afternoon walking in the park. It's nothing like the parks at home, well it is but in a bigger way, hell's teeth a lot bigger way. I take a ride in a carriage around the park. This really is a wonderful place to spend some quality time, the running and walking must be fantastic. I head back to the hotel and wonder what to do for dinner?

Chapter 2 :B:

I watch the screens as the room fills with idiots, De Witt and I watch the chaos in the room, what are all these people doing here on a Sunday, surely their time would be better spent with their families? We just asked for an informal chat. I notice that Howarth is on the phone a lot, as the tech person zooms in on his face, the microphones will pick up the conversations. I just sit and wait to take my cue. Then the door opens and in she breezes. She's beautiful, even in the stuffy suit, and as a bonus my headache has just got a whole lot better. Thank you Lord it pained me so. Taking note and sitting up we watch her. Is this the girl who is going to save my career and get me home? It's not a bad thing that she's actually stunning. Dan was right she is a beautiful looking girl, his phone pictures didn't do her justice at all, Penelope Daniels is amazing. I watch her as she studies the room. The boss and I smile as she rips into the arse Howarth. He's blaming Angela for all this mess, and one new arsehole is ripped for Howarth. She settles down and I watch her with great ease, she's stunning, and those legs I want wrapped around me. My fella agrees, and he twitches, down boy.

"Come in after us Ben, that girl had him sussed and within minutes, you were right, there's something fishy going on. She may have something going on in her pretty head of hers and don't think I didn't notice you watching her Ben, watch your step, and remember she's here to save you and your career, not wake up as another notch on your bed frame young man." I take another couple of Tylenol, these stress migraines are killing me more and more of late. Damn it, I could have done with doing this next week, but shit this needs sorting out.

"Yes Sir, I know, but those legs are a killer blow for me to sit and watch." He laughs, and then goes into the conference room with the rest of the team.

The room is crowded, and I saunter in after them. I watch as the idiots on their side do their thing coming up with ways to get my sorry arse out of this mess I created. I laugh as one of the office boys from their side waves at me like a puppy dog, really, he's brought an office boy. I only know who he was because when I went to see Howarth last week this lad spilt coke over his trousers when I walked in the office, he may be a little star struck.

De Witt starts a conversation to wind up Miss Daniels, we need to know if she's as good as Dan says she is, and is as straight talking as he claims, and this no-nonsense thing she has, the unique, no shit taking from anyone, and as a bonus is good at her job? I watch her as she speaks, he's right she doesn't take any prisoners. This woman is hot to look at, as well as to listen to, even if it's at my expense and she's ripping me a new one too. Mom will love her being they are so alike. She really is good, and as she storms out of the room. I'm in love, not lust, she's awesome.

I talk about hiring of her and Mr De Witt agrees, she needs to be the one on my case, and as soon as possible. I've trained for a while before I got here, and I need to think of the things she said, I know it wasn't my fault and I know I can't take their damn place, no matter how hard I prayed and wished I could? It's just nobody has said what she did, they'd had their allotted time together and it had ended, and I had to get over it, not wallow in it as I have done. Why was it so romantic and sad at the same time, the fact that they did spend the rest of their lives together and died happy?

Hell, if that was all I had to be unhappy about I would be the happiest man alive, no my problems are not my best friend and ex dying, though sad, it is not why I hit the shit slide to hell, that reason is closer to home and way more painful, way more. I'm jogging home through the park, I see her, but she doesn't see me. I watch her she looks relaxed and so beautiful. Can this thing be true, and you really can 'fall in love at first sight' and it's not just in the myriad of movies my darling sisters make me watch? I need to go talk to Henry. He will know what I need to do. I find him sunning himself in the park.

"Afternoon Henry, here's your lunch and dinner, the other bag has the new boots in I said I'd get for you, and a couple of warmer jumpers and thick socks. Those are on their last legs, those boots should keep your feet warm for a while, please let me get you somewhere to stop, Sir?"

"You're a good boy Ben. I've the means to live in a home should I want to, I've a large and welcoming family. I just prefer living this way of life Ben. I think, well I know I tell you that every time I see you. Thank you for worrying, you're a kind young man, your mother must be so proud of you. Thank you also for these, I'm going to head south for the winter after our chat Ben, the weather is non-too forgiving this time of year. Will I see you when you go for training down there?" I hand him his tea, heavily sugared and ready to go.

"I don't know. There is still a slim chance my problem can be sorted, and the girl I met today can and will get me back home, but you're welcome in LA the sun is just as nice there. Henry, I need some of the free advice you give me Henry. I think I'm in love, I think I've met my perfect other half of me."

"Sorry young man, but affairs of the heart are not my forte, losing my first and only love is what led me to the open roads." Damn, I need advice and he's always spot on.

It was Henry who first pointed out there was something hooey going on at Harts place. He sorted my head out with mom's illness and how I felt about finding out that I was letting her and my sisters down. He told me she must always come first and sort it he did and for many weeks too. He talked sense to me and got me through my trying times. He stopped my being an arse and a bad son and brother. When Penny said talk to a tramp, I needed to laugh, as she was spot on, and right too about the other fellow I see, he is bloody useless and she's right I pay him a fortune too, but Henry's fee is a simple lunch in a paper bag every afternoon, here in his office in the park.

I like Henry and help him out whenever I can. We have been friends since after our first accidental meeting; he was being rough housed by drunken idiot kids and I saved him from their drunken tirades when he'd said no to them filming a tramp bashing? I see him regularly and for as long as he stops here. I dread the summer and his not returning to the park for his vacation here. He has stopped longer than he usually does, to help me and he won't let me pay his fare to get him to the warmth, he did accept the boots and socks though. I like this old man very much. We chat for a while and as he rises to leave for his travel. He leans in and shakes my hand.

"Grab any happiness you can, life is too short for regrets and as Sinatra say's 'regrets I've had a few, too few to mention.' Sort yourself out and everything else will fall into place Ben. See you at summer training camp. Lunch is on you when next we meet." I give him a man hug and watching as he leaves, I hope he sees the money in the boots. I walk to my apartment shower and change for dinner. I'm meeting Dan for our weekly catch up later. I look out of my window and there is no mistaking the woman below, Penny is leaving the building, no bags though. So hopefully it looks like she may be stopping. I need to eat, and I head down.

"Evening Frank, where did you send the blonde English woman? Like I need to ask, you sent him to your brother's place, right?"

"Best slice in New York, damn right I did. They know to look after her I phoned them, to tell them she was on her way." I smile Frank has the biggest heart I know here and has, time after time, and for my shame, put me to bed when I was too drunk to get out of the taxi.

"Thanks Frank, she's a little head strong and whether she knows it or not is marrying me." He smiles and wishes me good luck. I think I'll need it with this woman. I head to Angelo's, where she seated and eating a pizza. She is struggling with the cheese and looks so hot as her tongue grapples with the stringy cheese, she curls it around and around her tongue, and I feel a sudden movement in the trouser department. I head in to speak to the woman I've fallen head-over-heels in love with.

Chapter 3:

I guess as my room is mine for a week, I'm stopping. I'd made a quick phone call to reception clarified that fact for myself and as my ticket is an open return ticket, I've no need to rush back. I'll stay and see what the big apple has to offer. I go down for dinner in the restaurant here. I'm heading to the Rose Club for something to eat and drink. I take my seat and I am given the menu and I'm left to peruse it at my leisure. I look over the posh menu and decide this is not for me, because tonight I need to eat something proper.

I head for the door after telling the Maître de, that I've changed my mind, because my jet lags kicked in and I'm sorry, but sheisk it's too posh for little ole me. Unless their fruit de mar comes by the tray load, and not just on that fancy slate plate, with I might add, more greenery than is necessary, because from what I saw it wouldn't fill the gaping hole that is my empty belly. I've not eaten anything since having my breakfast on the plane.

Instead I find myself walking around the block, where I'm heading for a place called Angelo's for a slice. My taste buds are to feast upon the best pizza in the whole of New York according to the concierge. After a really short walk I get there, where I'm seated and passed the menu. I order a bottle of bud light and one small thin crust vegetarian pizza. The first beer slides down my throat quickly, too quickly really, so I order another. Then my pizza is ready and in no time at all Mike brings it to me at the table.

"Wow, if this is small, I'll eat my hat, there's enough here for a small family Mike." I grab a slice and eat. Frank was right, this is the best pizza ever. I take a sip of the beer and grab another slice. Looking up I smile. I'm being joined at the table by Ben. He looks better than he did this morning, if that were at all possible? His dark eyes draw me in.

"Can I join you?" I wipe the strings of cheese from my mouth.

"Feel free, take a pew, do you want a drink?" He laughs.

"I'll have a beer with you, just to be sociable because I can't have a lady drinking alone." I wave my bottle at the waiter, and he brings Ben a bud light too, thanking him, he joins me.

"Help yourself, I don't think I can manage it all, please?" He picks a slice up and eats. I watch as he eats it, how can he make eating pizza look so damn sexy? I snap back, stud watching is over. Then I remember too what an absolute bitch I was to him earlier.

"What can I do for you, and how did you know where I was Mr Lord?"

"Frank, the doorman? He told me where he'd sent you. I've a condo in the hotel and noted you were on your way out. You really should be careful, a lady out on her own in the big city at night is asking for trouble, because it isn't always safe to travel the streets alone. Especially a good looking lady like you Ma'am." I laugh.

"I live in Notting Hill, in London, so I think I can handle New York, this city, well it's like a cake walk compared with some of the places I've been." He smiles at me.

"Point taken, it is just a friendly warning, but please watch where you go alone at night. Today Penny, were you pissed at something or someone else, or was your rage focused on me in there? Really, had something or someone else pissed you off and I copped for some of that too? You were right though damn it, there were too many people helping one idiot out. How long have you been on my case hours? Seven months they have been trying to stop me being an ass, and they still failed to notice any of what you did in that hour. Oh, and I had a migraine before I went into the meeting, hence the looking rough. I had not been drinking and for the record I've not been drunk in a while, other than having the odd glass or bottle of light beer, cheers."

"Sorry for presuming you were and for my being so matter of fact over the deaths of your friends, but my philosophy is you can't change the past, so look to improve your failings, simply learn from your mistakes and move on, because life's too short for regrets and I should know I've had a few. Old Frank was right on that. I should take his advice more often, as I too have had many regrets in my life and unfortunately, they aren't as the song goes 'too few to mention' either, as my list of wallowing out-does yours Ben, believe me, and yes it took me a long time to get over them too. Carpe diem Mr Lord, don't waste time with regrets ever, and yes that idiot agent you have Howarth, he was annoying me. Then, and I am sorry about this one, but I was a little hung over for my shame." He smiles and eats. His eyes are so beautiful, as he talks, I listen. I don't need to come across as now as a pontificating bitch, he knows where I stand, I hope?

"Mm, I wonder if Danny 'Bad' Manners was right in recommending that you be my new manager? He said you were good, and you give your everything to your clients, including the straight talking and giving a bitch slap, where needed. Yes, I needed to hear you, no one else dares to tell me straight, well here at least, at home I have Mom and let's just say she's a whole different kettle of fish and very like you in that sense. She's all about straight talking, no coddling, say it as she sees it. She plans ahead for everything, knows what she's doing and does it well." A sudden sadness appears across his face, he misses being near his family, he really needs to get home. "I'm not like her at all, I just go with the flow, ventis secundis, tene cursum." I nod in approval of his Latin usage. "Mom is Italian and spouts Latin, normally when she is cussing, we kids were just quick learners." His mother is important to him, I hear it in his voice, he's sad too when he speaks of her.

"Who did you say recommended me? Daniel Manners, the footballer I used to represent in England, who signed for the New York Red Bulls, dumping me without a kiss my arse or a thank you, that Danny boy? How the hell do you know, Danny?" He smiled, and then he ate more of the pizza.

"We attend alcoholics unanimous together. Do you fancy joining us for a chat tonight because I'm heading out there now? Well, when we finish this pizza." I hadn't seen Danny in over two years, and we parted on none too friendly terms. I wanted him to join another British team, but he wanted out of the country after his divorce and flew here on a whim when he was released by Preston and signed a two-year contract and sorted himself out with state side management. I was so annoyed with him at the time, and I still am it seems? Ben asks for the bill as we ready to leave.

"I know Dan wouldn't like seeing me again, we have unfinished business and my turning up and cramping his style isn't what he would like." Should I go just to get the money he owes me, back? I could do with an early night too. He catches the waiter's eye for the bill. "No Ben it's fine really, I will get this, as it was after all my dinner you ate." He smiles as the manager tells him it's on the house.

"You're not going to get to take Mamma back home, not if you give your fantastic food away, thanks Mike, great as usual, I may have to have veggie again, ciao." He smiled threw down a hundred and helped me to my feet. "Are you coming? I promise you a quiet and relaxing night." I laughed and walked out with him, his hand, it tightly held mine as he hailed a yellow cab and told the driver to take us to the bar whilst I climbed in the back. We pulled up outside an aptly named bar called 'Off the Wagon.'

"Are you kidding me Ben? Well, if ever you drank in a more appropriately named bar."

"That irony isn't lost on me either. I think that's why Dan picked it? Your hand if you please Milady." He helped me out of the car, but as I got out, I stumbled into his arms. "Oops, Milady is hammered after two light beers, you're such a light weight." I smile, just as we are flooded in light from the camera flashes. He goes towards them, but I manage to hold him back and lead him to the bar. He really has a deep hatred for the paparazzi, and I have to wonder why? "They are the bane of my life those fuckers, with their constant need to be in my face, most of the stories are a crock of shit Penny, I hate them and their intrusion into my life."

"Ben you're a public figure, it's expected. Did you not realise that when you made it big and earned big, that they would follow you? It comes with the status of being the best pitcher in America at the moment! Sorry Ben, but you have to buckle down and keep your head, or risk losing everything you have worked for, especially with that temper of yours. It seems whoever gets the job of straightening you out is going to have their work cut out for them, did they decide?"

"I know I have a short fuse but given the crap they print Penny I just lose it with them. There's knowing about me and knowing all about me, they get everywhere, and print lies, even when told the truth. Yeah, the person I picked will have to be damned good. So that's why I decided a week ago, when Danny Boy recommended you, to hire you. You're a breath of fresh air and I like what you do, you don't sugar coat my crap, you are all about truth and no bullshitting Penelope Daniels. The others hadn't a clue that you were all being monitored by my club bosses in another room and you were the only one working, and the only one who actually came close to my problem, but Milady, even you were way off the mark. They loved it when you had Howarth by his balls, you know, about it being a team issue and not just Angela's fault?"

"Oh, and how far off the mark was I?" He looked at me with his eyes saddened.

"Way off and it is something I'm paying a great deal of money to a stranger to sort through." Argh I hit a nerve with the seeing a shrink. "No talk of the work kind now, other than to tell you that I'm offering you a job, I hope you seriously consider accepting it? I happen to know your boss is a pain in the arse though. This way Milady, we have people to meet and beers to be drunk. I don't actually drink Jack by the way, I just threw a bottle of Jack at the fucker. If I had been a little more refreshed, I would have killed him, as it was, I just put the window of his car through."

"Mmmm and I'm betting he's glad you missed because you were so tired? Come on take me to alcoholics unanimous then." Holding me possessively in his arms, he then led me into the crowded bar, where Danny was holding court at a corner table, in what I can only describe as a college bar.

"Penelope Daniels, is it really you? I missed you darling." Oh my, he didn't just go there, or did he? A quick nut punch leaves him spluttering. "Oh, bloody hell, below the belt Pen, really below the belt, my poor sore Wilber is offended." He got up and hugged me.

"That was for running out on the massive bar tab at the club. What do I give you for running out on a contract that had taken me two months to iron out? My boss made me wait another year before he promoted me too, you bastard." His hands were up, and he surrendered.

"I just couldn't stop, and you know the reasons why. I'm glad you came to your senses with Garth and ended it, but I'm surprised it had taken you so long, given that he fucked anything with a pulse, why though when he had you. I do not know nor understand his reasoning? Now that was an arrogant motherfucker and I'm surprised someone as strong as you went down that road, all the dark crap he was into, sex clubs and party nights? You never made an appearance though, so did you do your partying at home with him? I would love to see you in those get ups the Slocomb Sisters wore at their swinger's parties." He leant down and kissed me. I pulled away. Garth never had me perhaps Dan, that's why? How the hell did he know I'd split from Garth? Shit, if he knew all about their alternate sex life, then how many others knew? Shit, how fucking dumb was I? Talk about bloody wearing blinkers.

"Don't you bloody well dare Danny, just don't, perhaps because I didn't know that's what he was into?" I went to sit with a surprised Ben as Dan ordered a pitcher of Bud Light and then he disappeared to the toilet.

"Do all your clients get those sorts of kisses? It may be interesting working with you after all Penelope?" He looked a little pissed off with me.

"No, they don't, and he isn't a client, he was a client and that was all. He was in a mess after his divorce and needed daily help. He mistook that for more than it was. It was my fault and one I rectified and please call me Penny." He must have been screwing around before his divorce too unless, they went together. I always thought his wife was a girl after the sister's hearts. Seems I may have been right, and things are suddenly getting clearer.

"Sorry about that Penny, he didn't say anything other than you're good at your job, and not that he was interested in revisiting your lips again." I snap back to my date with Ben. Oh hell, he isn't a date, he's a hunky fella, whose sat watching me. What, he's sat watching me? I... Hell... I need to explain in case he thinks that is how I work.

"He has never visited them before, so he can't revisit, just to point that out Ben. He never used to drink like this either, what's happened stateside to make him a drinker? Six months ago, he was firing on all cylinders and doing well enough to get back in the Premiere League if he wanted to. I've only had good reports back on him for the last couple of years. His personal life, it always worried me, and we did form a good working relationship, but he and I are just friends, in that sort of way.

I ran around after him for quite a while, as his personal slave and not once did I ever lust after him, just to point that out in case you were wondering? Looking after him as a personal manager was damned hard work and I didn't know him as well as I wanted to, because he was always good at hiding his deeper feelings, there was always sadness behind his bravado. He wouldn't let me in and was hurting, he wouldn't talk to me, nor let me help, and yes, I tried Ben, but it's a pride thing. It seems a lot of men have this problem, not talking through their problems and just acting out.

Sometimes I wanted to shake the stupid out of him, but I knew he needed to let it go in his own way, in the end he chose his way and that was to run and hide over here, he was like you and got drunk a lot and got into scrapes, all the damn time." He had always looked after himself, before the divorce, could he have been fooling me all that time too? No, no he always had clean tests. I'll have to find out because he was never this big an idiot before, even when he was sleeping with his best friend and teammate's wife, she was a 'Slocomb Slut Club' paid up member too.

"We don't do the deep girl type of talking thing here. I don't ask, it's a man code thing for what goes on in the bar, stays in the bar. I think he may be lonely and missing his parents back in England, all this he puts on is a show. He lives a nice life, he makes good money, but he's like me and has nobody to share it with, so he grabs the attention of anyone he can here. It's kind of lonely living in an ivory tower Penny. I know I don't like it a whole lot either."

I laugh inwardly, a bar room code of honour. Nevertheless, he's right about being lonely and living in the ivory tower's thing. Ben's hit the nail on the head. He has a massive family at home, he owns all the houses on the estate where he lived, and he filled the houses with his entire family, all of them lived like a big gypsy family commune. Here he has nobody and neither do I. Yes, my tower too is a lonely place to live. I thank God for Suzie Q. I hear the eighties music is playing in the background and the college girls are shaking their asses at Ben, I watch as he pours me a glass of beer. Then Dan comes back and grabs my hand and he leads me to the dance floor, where the girls are all over him.

"They are playing our tune Penny, come on shake your arse with your old friend?"

"I wasn't aware Rick Astley's Together Forever, was in fact our tune Daniel, nor that we were together forever, but funny we did part and badly too? You still owe me four grand. Your girls drank a lot of champagne that night, I hope they could perform for you, it cost me enough for the hotel clean up too. All of which I had to pay, because you put my card over the hotel bar you bastard." I danced with him and he still pulled the cheesy dance moves, he thinks the girls like his moves. Wrong, they are truly cringe-worthy, talk about Dad Dancing, it should be renamed in his honour as Dan Dancing. He moved me closer and held me around my waist. I pulled free from his grip and I did my own thing, getting caught up in the music.

Ben came to my side and danced with me. I loved a little sing-a-long with Mr Astley. Ben smiled and as he did, I was pushed into his arms by the overzealous girls vying for his attention, he held me protectively there in his arms and I danced with him. He was surprisingly gracefully it has to be said, held here in his arms, with my head really close to his chest I am in heaven, the smell he gave off was amazing.

What was it, has he washed in pure sex? He smelt heavenly, of coconuts, wood, spices and man! Hell, what was I doing, was it stupid of me to think this felt right and I liked being held by him, and I mean really liked it? I think I had a few of the girls turning pee green, which made me feel good. I danced back to the table, leaving Dan dancing with his audience, but I pulled Ben back with me, he smiled and came with me willingly. Why I did that, I didn't know, maybe I wanted the college groupies to think he was mine? Dan though, he had turned into a proper arse and I needed to get out of here.

"Sorry about that, he's so different from the Danny I've had good reports on over the last two years, he's towed the line and behaved, what's happened in the past six months Ben? If you can't tell me that's fine, but I'll find out for myself what caused this change in behaviour here, even if it kills me, because he was supposed to be doing well?"

"I couldn't tell you Penny, he went home in the summer, he came back as I had my 'head fucked time,' the change in him was really strange, he went from being a nice guy, to being an idiot, a total idiot too and has been like this ever since, as you say he is an arse. He won't tell me, so I can't help him. I do try despite my saying the man code doesn't permit talks." I'll e-mail his sister when I get back. She will tell me and then I can help the arse.

"I hate what he has turned into since his wife cheated on him, I hate cheaters and she did the worse kind of cheating... She slept with his brother, so he went mad with rage and self loathing, he was so in love with her, and he was understandably devastated, so he then slept with whoever offered it up after that, they eased his pain, or so he said. I couldn't do a thing to help him, he pushed the self-destruct button and ruined a fantastic deal I got him by sleeping with the sponsor's daughter.

He was then out of there quicker than his feet could carry him. Then I spent months getting him a new club. Then after I'd worked on a great deal, and he'd agreed terms and conditions, he went celebrating near his new club. He left the party with four young girls and left me with the bar bill. Then he fled the hotel in the morning, leaving me to sort the mess that the all-night party in his room caused too, and then he came here without telling me. He has a past thing for being a bad boy." Ben changed the subject, maybe the bad boy talk by me, was perhaps reminding him he too had been bad, but was he still being bad?

"You look like you like to dance Penny, though not the being groped and mauled bit?" I smiled.

"Oh you noticed... I do love to dance and with the right person, I do enjoy a grope." Really, I can't believe I just bloody said that! "He is way past stupid and drunk, if he thinks he stands a chance with me. Look, as nice as this is and sorry it's not, it stinks in here. I have to be going, because I can't stand the smell any longer. Sorry it's been nice seeing you and thanks for dinner I owe you one. When you're next in London, it's on me." I headed out the door and I headed towards the hotel, it's up I think, crap or is it down? I have a moment of uncertainty and I panic because I've no idea where I'm.

"Share my cab back home? We're going to the same place after all. It suddenly got lonely in there, besides we have things to discuss, I offered you a job and you haven't said yes yet." His hand is on my shoulder. I instantly relaxed and breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm going to walk, it's not that far and I need fresh air, can we discuss the job later?"

"Well then allow me to please walk with you Milady? I need you in my corner Penny, I need to be back home as soon as possible, tomorrow wouldn't be soon enough, you wouldn't believe how great it would be to be back there, Milady has to help me." I wasn't sure, but hell strange city, strange company. Who it just happened to know the way home? I need to do some serious thinking about the job offer. The money is insane, and the change would do me good, he seems to need me, so should I, and could I?

"Why do you keep calling me Milady?" I think it's sweet.

"I'm trying to have some fun at your expense, with the funny English accent Parker, the driver in Thunderbirds uses Milady, Parker calls his Lady Penelope." I laugh his Milady comment, mmmm. He takes my arm and escorts me over the road, we laugh as we begin dodging the myriad of cars and yellow cabs, we then head up Fifth Avenue.

"Do you like to walk Penny, because a cab would have been only a few bucks?"

"Mmmm I do, I love getting to see the things that fly past you when you're in a cab. I love it, it's strange I know but I just like walking. So, are you ever going to tell me why seven months ago you turned from 'All American Hero' to a person who seems not to care about what he's doing with his life, why are you so hell bent on ruining your career? A career I might add; that any lesser mortal would give their first born child for."

"I don't know yet, but you were right, I was affected by the death of my two best friends, but not because of your reasoning, no Penny, I didn't ever leave her, she left me and that's why I came to New York, to get away from them. Penny, I was heartbroken, I loved her and asked her to come here with me and marry me. I went around for my answer, as she had asked for time and when I got there, she already had company, bare arsed, naked company, him. Here then was as good a place as any to run away to." What the hell did she do that for? He's a six foot plus a hunky specimen of a man.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Ben, I just presumed."

"Ignorance Penny is the mother of presumption. I went back to see my family, to recuperate, you know from the damn shoulder injury. I had to get some home cooked meals and some 'Mom Loving' and care. I miss way them too much being over the other side of the country. Whilst I was there, we, Teddy Belinda and I started talking again. They were getting married and they invited me to join in their celebration, so I gladly went, because they were my friends once and I was big enough to get over it.

Besides, they were so in love, really deeply in love too, that any fool could see that, and I did. We had a great day, it was wonderful, because they did have a true love, which was nothing like ours, or rather my puppy love. I had a great deal of fun that day, being home with friends and family again, and we partied on, after they left the reception at her folk's place for their honeymoon. God, did we party, and we celebrated like we hadn't a care in the world.

Then we got the horrific news that a drunk, whilst driving his car straight at them and at speed, had killed them both instantly, just two hours after their wedding and less than a mile down the road from home, the place, the damned place we were all still celebrating at. The party was well and truly over, and I got wasted. They had been back in my life such a short time; they had been married for a short time and well..." His voice very quiet, and in almost a sob, he continued to explain.

"...They had been married hours and earlier that day they found out that they were to have a child. I was so numb and confused, there was no justice, he took them and spared the drunk, why when they had so much love left to give the world, to their child? Then I wondered what I had to look forward to. I'd had nobody in my life who I loved like that, nobody who would mourn me, apart from Mom and my Sisters?

Belinda was the last girl who meant anything to me and yeah, I got damn good and maudlin, because I was so lonely and a self- pitying fool. I thought that was what I needed to do, you know, change? Maybe me being different would mean I got a life. I went from a God fearing honest nice boy, the nice boy who worked hard, prayed every day and looked after his Momma, to a monster I didn't recognise when I got up in the morning.

I carried it on for a few weeks. Then I woke one morning, and I realised I didn't and don't enjoy that type of life at all. I'd carried it on until August though, being a complete arse and a nasty drunk, out of control, sad and alone. August though, hell I got yet more life shattering news and well..." He let out a deep and yes sexy sigh. "...Most of the time since then, you know when I'm out, I drink light beer and probably not even a pitcher all night, though to see some of the pictures, I'm a raging alcoholic. I well... I had..." I hold his hand and he sort of smiles.

"Tell me what happened to change you Ben, something happened to change your life back in August, you were going to tell me, and stopped... It may do you some good to share?" He looked into my eyes and sighed. "I swear it stays between you and I, tell me, get it off your chest, can you do that and please trust me?" He looked into my eyes and sighed.

"I had just got the worst news possible from back home, in that horrible month of August, this was the sole reason for getting my act together... My Mom... She had... Shit Penny, she had been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumour, the very weekend of the wedding." He sobbed and wiped away a tear. Discreetly done, but I saw the hurt and pain in his eyes. "My poor sisters, they had kept it from me, at her request, because I had my own problems. What problems? I was just a drunken fucking idiot and they shouldered everything, all the mess her illness brought and from me, the only one who could help, had I not been so wrapped up in myself.

I would have realised it sooner, but no I was just wallowing in my pit of self-pity, whilst they struggled with everything. My sisters and my Mom were really struggling, and I was just being a drunken idiot. My family were living in their own nightmare. She's such a strong lady my Mom, she's like you straight talking, she's a take no horse shit, shoot from the hips sort of woman and my sister's take after her too. They would love you Milady."

"I would love to meet the people who mean the world to you too Ben." A slight smile crossed his face; the hurt is still there though.

"Then Terri, my eldest sister, came to New York and kicked my arse. Mom had started with some of the worst symptoms again, so they finally had to let me know because they couldn't manage it all alone, and that they were in a heap of debt with her medical bills."

"How, do you not pay health insurance?" I ask.

"Yes, but there are things you need to pay for that it doesn't cover, and Mom, she didn't want me to ask why they needed even more money than usual. I wouldn't have asked, but in not asking she stupidly figured if I didn't know, I didn't need to worry about her. That was my life affirming moment and I changed. I now see to it they have more than they need, but back then they didn't have enough, and they were robbing Peter to pay Paul, trying to keep the costs of her extra medication and treatments from me. Just in case I asked what I was paying for, I wouldn't have known what I was signing, even if they did just give me the bills. I was so bad I signed loads of shit back then, only I didn't know what I was signing I never checked." I held his arm tighter as we walked, he continued to un-burdened himself. "So, for me October was another bad month.

There were plenty of airmiles used flying home to make sure I was at all her hospital visits, so they couldn't hide anything from me. I spent a ton of money getting the house adapted and generally doing things I should have been doing all the time, instead of being a drunken idiot of a son. I have been drunk Penny, but only the once and that was when Terri came to town to relax a little and see a show, it was here where we got the news she was fine, it hadn't come back and then both Terri and me, we got wasted." His face lights up as he speaks of his mother. I sigh, I wish I missed my parents like that, but I don't. "She's fine for now, but whilst drunk that night I figured they would get rid of me if I pretended to be a drunk waste of space. I wanted out of this contract so bad, and I stupidly thought being a bad boy would get me thrown off the team and I'd get to go back home!"

"Why not just ask for a transfer?"

"I did, but my agent Howarth, he said I was contracted to them and the club, and there was no way out of the damned contract I signed when I was a kid. Now you know the reason Ben Lord is an arse." I'm shocked at his honesty, saddened at what life has thrown at him, and angry I presumed to know him, when I so obviously didn't, and Christ did I get it wrong this morning, spouting all that damn crap at him. Damn it, I feel like the idiot now.

"Why did you lie about the drinking, your blood and hair tests all confirm your story, that you're not an alcoholic and that you drink far less than you're rumoured to be actually drinking, and both teams know this, it's in all the reports. Ben those you can't fake! Hearing all this explains a hell of a lot though. Who have you told all this to apart from me? There are clauses in your contract for this sort of occurrence surely, could you not tell someone, other than Howarth?" The rules and regulations governing this game are mind blowing, and I'm struggling to get over some of them and if I'm being totally honest, I mean most of them.

"Just Dan, and now you know about Mom. My management team said there wasn't any way of getting out of the contract I had signed. I'd have to stay until it ran out. My ironclad contract with the club and the one with my agents and the agency, couldn't be broken, and they would sue me if I quit, which would then take all my money from me and make sure I never worked again. I need to keep my wages, as they now fund an account for the girls. They had to cut down the hours they work, so I meet all their expenses, including their schooling, their cars and their credit cards, but it's small change with what I earn. Mom's treatments and the medical costs are high too, because I want her to have the very best, I can afford." He lets out a sigh and as he takes hold of my hand, he holds it tightly.

"That's when Dan said I needn't be stupid and throw away my career, because he knew of a tough cookie who could help me and told me I needed to get you on board. You're some sort of contracts wizard, good at what you do and a goddamn miracle worker, a legal eagle with a sharp mind, and you could find a way out in any contract.

Dan says you won't let me down, he says you were good at going the extra mile, when he needed you. I need you to get me back home Penny. Mom could go tomorrow or be here for years. The tumour has shrunk with chemo and stuff, things are looking good for her at the moment. Can you help me Penny, because I just want to be with them, and back home?"

"I'll need to get my thinking cap on, and I will need a couple of days to suss out some things Ben." He looks so sad and his grip on my hand has not lessened whilst we have walked, it feels nice my hand being cradled in his. "So yes, I'll help you. I'm now your personal management consultant, at least for the next week, and if within a week I've not delivered you to the Lions, then feel free to sack me." We were outside the Empire State Building. "I've always wanted to go up to the top of this particular building, it's on my bucket list. I will come back and visit you, you grand old building later in the week." I sigh and grin like a sappy moron, when he drags me to the ticket booth, and of course I follow him there, like a puppy.

"Two main and top express tickets thank you Ma'am. Your wish Milady is my command." He handed over his card and kissed the back of my hand. Wow what the hell was that feeling, I was shivering, and had goose bumps, can you please do that again? We headed to the lift, and in just a matter of minutes we were on the top deck and within seconds of those doors opening, I'm mesmerised by the view of the city, its breath taking. I think I want to cry, and I do, as Ben laughs.

"Oh thank you Ben, my Sleepless in Seattle moment, thank you, thank you." I give him a kiss and a squeezing hug. He laughs at me, but for someone who likes a good chick flick, they don't get better than that one.

There will be a few more movie moments like this for me to get really happy about, but this one is the top of my list, this one and having my lover run and find me waiting on top of the Eiffel Tower, in the city of love. Perhaps I'm happy about doing this, because I'm here with Ben, who knows? My list of favourite chick flicks is endless, as are the places in them I want to see. It could only be beaten if the male actors in them were there too. The best two are Mr Geer and Mr Swayze, between them their films have many of my 'I want that moments,' the best one of all is putting Baby in a corner. Ben smiles, and I realise I still have him in a death hug, I don't want to pull away either. He doesn't seem to mind that I am hugging him, in fact his arm is around me and they are hugging me back.

"So Penny, whom did you envisage coming up here to meet, at closing time on Valentine's Day? Who is the Sam Baldwin in your life playing, opposite your Annie Reed, pray tell?" I laugh he knows the characters names.

"How...?"

"I've four sisters who just have to hog the DVD. You will find that I'm fully versed in most mushy chick movies." I start to shiver, there's a chill up here tonight and I should have brought a coat.

"Here, take this." He takes his jacket off and places it over my shoulders. "What if, someone you never met, someone you never saw, someone you never knew, was the only someone for you?" I smile, as he still has his arms over me and his jacket, and he is quoting the lines from the film at me.

"I would think most people meet their perfect love that way Ben, because you never know where destiny will take you, and who that someone is until you find that someone. After all a stranger is just a friend, you have not yet met. That quote is one of my own and not from the film, which I can do if you wish a quote war, and just so you know Ben, they are my own personal views on strangers becoming friends and becoming more." He laughs, and no wonder, I just said we could become more, shit are we even friends.

"Destiny is something we've invented, because we can't stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental! My personal favourite, Milady."

"How about, when you meet someone, and you're attracted to them, it just means that your subconscious is attracted to their subconscious, subconsciously, so what we think of as chemistry, is just two neuroses, knowing that they are a perfect match."

"Or how about... Well, I'm gonna get out of bed every morning, breath in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won't have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breath in and out, and then after a while, I won't have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while? That's what I have been like these past few weeks hoping for some sort of change to breeze into my life and get the perfect back into my feeling sorry for myself life." I oh-ed, I did say he felt sorry for himself a lot today, umm foot in mouth disease, and I suffered from it quite badly this morning it seems?

"Lordie Lord, who would have thought it, you're a closet chick flick, quoting expert, and a very good one at that! Your Sisters did hog the television then. I bet the first place they came was here, wasn't it?" He laughs loudly.

"They went to the park first, and then they trolled the street looking for Central Perk Cafe, but yeah, pretty much. Have you a cell phone?" I pass him my iPhone, laughing as he takes my picture on top of the Empire State Building and a passing tour guide takes one of us together. Tapping in his number and dialling it, he smiles. "They have a nice bar on the ground floor, do you fancy joining me for a night cap, Penny?"

"Ummm yes please, I need a drink just to warm my cold bones." He takes my arm and leads us to the express lift to the bottom.

"I can cross that from my bucket list now, one more thing off the list, it was so nice of you for doing that for me, thank you Ben. It was amazing."

"I'm glad to be of service Milady, this way. If I can in any way to help you in your quest to fulfil your need to travel to an exciting film location or two, then speak up, because I'm your man Penny. I've been in some cool hotels used in films over the years. I have walked out of the sea like James Bond a few times and I once did a walk through the Amityville House of Horrors house, as my sisters like horror films too, so yeah, I'm your man."

I give him his jacket back as we reach the bar. Is he for real, he's definitely nice to look at and he's good to talk too and as a bonus, like he'd need one, he likes chick flicks? I like him already. We head into the Empire Room right at the bottom of the building, an Art Deco decorated cocktail bar and it's definitely a nice bar, weird, yet wonderful. The pleasant walk here held in his arms was wonderful and warm, I almost wish we'd kept on walking, now we're in here he has no reason to be holding me close. I must remember to forget my jacket again.

"Find a seat and I'll bring the drinks over." He smiles as he looks over, he really is a handsome man and I'm not the only one who thinks so. He's being eye fucked by almost all the women in the room, all of them watching him and smiling. I laugh, as most adjust the fronts of their dresses and shrug their boobs up. I watch as he draws their eyes in, it can't be because he's a baseball player, alright a rich and handsome baseball player, or can it? His body and those smouldering good looks are doing that, phew I need a fan because I may be having a hot flush. He walks back to our table and slides in by my side.

"This is a German beer and not a light one so sip, it's a nice import though, and I hope you like it, well cheers." A clink of glasses and I smile.

"Prost, hier ist schlamm in ihrem auge." I sip the slightly stronger beer, and watch him drink his beer, the room is quite lovely, and the company better though

"You speak German, is there any end to your talents Miss Daniels?" I smile as I wipe the froth off my nose, how long was that there damn it?

"I do and a few other European ones too, being as most British football teams like to shop abroad for players, so I learnt a few, do you speak any besides swear words in Latin and Italian?"

"No, I haven't mastered English yet and I'm not great at Italian either, baseball is the only thing I have ever been any good at, it's the only thing I have ever been into in a big way, me and my Dad had plenty of fun, you know pitching and catching, and we played catch from the day I could hold a ball." I drank the strong beer and grinned like an idiot as women passed the table.

"This beer is so good, but I'm having just this one and we have to get back. I've a week to sort you out, and we will have to work hard at it too, things over the next week, they will be merciless, but we need to improve your bad boy image Ben. I need to get you seen in the right places, doing the right things, so we will be spending a lot of time together. So spill, who is Benjamin Lord and don't leave anything out, the good the bad and the ugly, and no I didn't like that film, but I watched it." He sits and laughs.

"I hope we're not being overheard because that would do my bad boy reputation some serious damage, the fact that it would take you a week to sort me out Penelope. As to getting to know me, there's not a lot to know. I am told I'm complicated, but I don't think I am, obviously? I think I'm fine, though I'm a horse's ass occasionally. I'm a whole lot of a Momma's Boy. I'm spoilt, because I'm the only boy in a house full of women. I love my family and miss them a whole heap.

I fly them out once a month, I have to, any longer and it would kill me. I'd love a massive family too. Mom wants a whole load of grandbabies and pesters us all the time. The girls don't intend to have any for a while, so I keep getting hassled to fill the need, before you know... She dies... But, I, you know? I haven't met the right girl, well, I hadn't." His eyes draw me in, and as I listen, I realise that sounded like a proposition, no? He smiles as his finger continues run over my hand as he speaks. The sadness is in his eyes is plain to see, when he speaks of his mother's looming illness. Wow, I may be falling in love or lust and heading for a whole heap of trouble. I never mix business and pleasure! But will I if that business is Ben? "Someday I want a house full of kids, all running around a big back yard, with kids playing in the pool and a dog running around, you know the whole picket fence thing? That's a way off yet and I need to get over the disastrous last three years of my life first."

We talk about different things mainly his family, his mother and sisters, his father not mentioned much apart from he taught him to catch and throw a ball, and I presume him either dead or his mother and he are no longer married? I figure he's dead, because when I mention my father, and what he did for a job and all the exciting things I got to do with them, before he and my mother found God! Obviously, he's still raw so I won't ask. We change the subject, back to films and places we want to visit, and places we want to see.

The girl from behind the bar brings Bens order over, another round and a truffle popcorn thing for us to nibble on. She too has those eyes for my date. I laugh as I keep going down the dating road. I think I'm tired or a tad tipsy, but I listen as he talks. He tells me how I hit the nail on the head with the talking to a tramp thing and tells me all about his good friend and man of the road, Henry.

He laughs as I blush and apologise again. He really is a good talker, it's a pity it had taken him so long to ask for help. We had been sat drinking for a couple of hours or three, but who is counting? He settled the bar tab and we headed back to the hotel. He has me pulled in close to him, he says to keep the chill from me, and I don't resist as we walk and talk some more. His smell is wonderful, and this feels right, being here?

I think I'm falling for him; I think I maybe, but I am confused by it? This is a big mistake Penny, I try to tell myself, but I get pins and needles when he touches me, my heart skips a beat when he stares at me, I quiver when his fingers touch me. It's either that or the few beers we have had have gone to my head? We were back at our hotel already. I don't want to say goodnight. He looks down into my eyes, God his eyes are so lovely. God kiss me Ben, please do something. Nope, he doesn't do a thing.

"Thanks for today and tonight especially, it's been Penny... Well, it's been really nice and well... I'll see you tomorrow." I smile and throw a quote at him, my Rhett Butler.

"After all, tomorrow is another day. You've just got to love Gone with the wind. Ben today has been different, thank you, but this is not how I normally conduct business, but then again it has been a surreal, confusing day for me, and truly unlike any other day I have had before. It's not the norm for me this thing that's happened today, it's not normal at all, but hell normal isn't getting on a plane drunk and flying all this way. The way I insulted a 'would be nice client' and then get him to do things from my bucket list, with me. Thank you for today Ben, it's certainly been an unusual type of day."

"Well, it's been kind of a good day for me and I hope we can work well together, very well Milady. I think, well... I kind of hoped for a bit better than nice client though. We will have to work on that one, goodnight Penny."

He saw me to my door, giving my cheek a soft, and very gentle kiss. I headed in, and he headed for his room. I watched as he got in the lift and like a stupid teenage girl, I swooned. I actually swooned after the hunky American had left me. I opened the door and collapsed on the bed humming.

Chapter 3 :B:

We talk a lot, me mainly, about Mom, home, the girls and 'the girls' of course, why is it every girl needs to know whom I've dated before? Is that a girl code thing, if so, why did my sisters not let me in on that one? We head back to the hotel. I've got her wrapped tightly under my arm. I really want more from her, a whole lot more. I kiss her on the cheek and head back to my room. There are phone calls to make, where some questions needing answering, Terri will tell me the truth. I mean, can I really have fallen in love with a near stranger? After a long chat to Terri, I find out that apparently, you can, and it's not just shit they put in movies and books.

"Ben, Mom and Dad met that way and never looked back. She must be some kind of woman Baby Brother watch yourself. She may have a serious point, sometimes work and pleasure doesn't always mix well, and you need the move to go smoothly, so she needs to be on her game Ben, not fending you off, but once she gets you the move, then yes, think about asking her to come here. Mom will tell you if she's the one good enough to have her grandbabies." Shit, I wasn't thinking babies yet. Those damn girls will do anything to get out of having kids.

"I know but she's... I don't exactly know what she is; she though could be the one, really Terri the one. She's... I don't know what, but she's funny to talk to, she makes me laugh and she is so damn smart, she is so like you lot too, she shoots from the hip, she even called me a dumb arse can you believe that? You will love her, all of you, she is, she's... Hell, the one." She laughs, tells me it's nice finally hearing, I have met someone. We talk discuss Mom for a fair bit of the conversation, her last lot of test results were clean and clear, thank you God. I head to bed and sleep.

Chapter 4:

I had a hot, hot shower, as I needed a quick refresh. I wanted to get a few hours of work in and I text Dan's sister too, then I sat at the desk, with my laptop on and I started my attack plan, the text comes back, she will send me an email because 'the shit hit fan' was all the text said. I await eagerly for a look see at that email. First in my long list of questions to the clubs in his life, I need to see how his current club feels about a transfer to the Lions, then to see if there was any hope of the favoured club, the Lions wanting him. I would hazard a guess the answer is no, especially not with his bad boy reputation supposedly going on, I would have thought. That's my biggest stumbling block and that needed sorting, quickly. I have a few phone calls to make to several newspapers. Ben has several urgent calls for meet and greets, and three are heartbreakers, and all are most definitely a must do thing. There will be a few anonymous tip offs to the papers, as to his whereabouts for the next couple of days. I know this will be hard for him to do, but we need them on our side for a change, and to work for us and not against us.

He has an appointment with an anger management counsellor, and a visit to a children's outreach programme, and then more time with pitch side fans. Three hours later, my battle plan is ready. I then sleep, but the dreams are of the man that is Ben Lord. My dreams, they disturb me, because he makes my body tingle and those untested places within me are opening up and my hidden curiosity for learning more about the man, the body and his beast are now springing to life.

Just what doors is he opening? I know in my dreams they are to his bedroom, where there is the massive bed, with the nicest of bedding, and a plethora of soft pillows and cushions are scattered against the headboard, the lights are dim and the man himself is walking in from the shower, he kisses me and takes me in his arms. Finally, he takes me to a high like never before, and then he takes every part of me, including the most valuable of my gifts, it seems is his to take.

I'd woke in a sweat and I'd brought myself to a climax in my sleep, my sex pulsed as I shivered and shook, my fingers are covered in my wetness, my God I have never had such a fantastic orgasm before, never have I gone the whole way with myself. I feel light-headed and exhausted, wow what would the actual thing do to me? Naughty Penny, very naughty, he's both a dream and nightmare rolled up within the same breath.

Every time I see him, I want to delve deep into those lips of his. I have never wanted to mix business and pleasure. Now however, I would kill to do that with Ben. The moment I saw him come into that room, not the dream bedroom, the meeting room, where I sat staring at him, I wanted more from him, I wanted to lose myself to him. I shiver, shush you, wonton hussy, I'd even had a fantasy of letting him take me on a desk, dressed as a secretary, what the hell is he doing to me?

I'm turning into a porn star, at least in my head, and wow my dreams in that head are like a sex workshop, nice as my erotic little fantasies are, and they are! I have to hold it in and back off. I've always been strictly business first and pleasure second, but he seems to be pushing my morality in the workplace boundaries, right out of the top of my lace top holdups! Seriously though, those work ethics and morals I swore by, they disappeared as soon as I saw him, and my wanting to kiss him was the least invasive thing I was imagining, I was envisaging more, so much more.

I had hoped he didn't hear me gasp. God, he would be a pleasure to have... I am so sorry Sister Hortensia, the kick boxing nun, but I think this is a frog that I have to kiss, and hope he's the one, my Prince Charming? I'm up now and after a cold shower, I dressed. I had no idea where Ben's suite was in the hotel, sorry condominium, so I contacted the main desk, and they put me through to his room. I was in The Yorkers Suite at the hotel, so they had no problems about putting me through. He eventually answered the phone.

"Yeah, what do you want?"

"Well Benjamin, answering your phone sooner and answering it in a better manner would be a help, with your image, grumpy is not the way to go. What's your room number and on what floor are you?"

"Um good morning Milady, did you sleep well? My dreams were disturbed thinking of you all night long. I was just taking a shower when you rang. My room number is 1002. Just get in the elevator and they will put you off on my floor. See you in ten, breakfast is on its way so hurry." I'm stunned. Breakfast, he ordered me breakfast. I grab my bags and give my outfit the once over. Fine, I look like executive of the year material, I laugh as I put my specks in my bag, because I'd not want to look like a secretary, a naughty Bella secretary. I head to the lifts and ask for suite 1002. Buttons are pressed and I'm at his floor, which is just two floors above mine.

"To your right Ma'am, halfway down the corridor and it is on the left-hand side." I'm determined I'm going to keep this business like, and uncomplicated by lustful thoughts and much imagined kisses.

"Thank you very much." I head to his room, just as room service are coming out. I dash past them and walk into his apartment and it's exactly like my suite, apart from the actual décor, it's not quite to my taste, but it's luxurious. I'm looking around when he walks from the bathroom. "Oh my word... Shit, I'm so sorry..." I had just walked in on him coming out naked and fresh from that very same bathroom. I want to look away, I need to look away, but my eyes are being a pair of lust filled bitches, yes, they drawn to his lower area. Oh hell, yes and what an area. My dream is here and in glorious reality, but my dreams are nothing like the reality.

"Hell... How did you get in? Shit... I hell... Penny you got an eyeful of the party package. I mean... Give me a minute to throw on some clothes. Don't you use the doorbells in England Penelope?" My cheeks are definitely red now. I'm mortified, but a little chuffed too. I saw his naked, hot body. Oh-God and what a body. You're definitely swooning Pens. I want that body and what a party package? Party package, funny name for something so wondrous, it makes me feel quite faint. "I'll be out in a minute help yourself to food, I didn't know what you liked so ordered a little of everything."

Chapter 4 :B:

Shit, she has seen me naked God help me. That was the nicest of accidents and accident or not, she did look at the package too. It's still hard from the exercise in the shower. I knew she was on her way up, and I didn't want, nor need a raging hard on distracting me from our breakfast appointment, but hell it too late it's here again. I hear her voice as it drifts through to my bedroom, and as I try to get it under control I'm losing the battle it has a mind of its own, tight undies and slack trousers will, hopefully, hide my 'party package!' I really need a new word for my dick.

It was a code word when the girls were discussing their boyfriend's dicks, even though I always begged them not too, but because I was, and I am their fifth sister, they never did stop using it or talking about it, and then I'd have to look their fella's in the eyes at school or college, not at all an embarrassing time for me, going to school with their boys! I go out to face the embarrassment we both will be feeling. I listen as she chats away, my camouflage job done, and my package is safely tucked away, but hell he's still active. I go see the reason for the bulge in my pants and the thoughts in my head.

"How did you know I would be up for breakfast? I had only decided when I rang you, to come up and discuss the plans?" I tell her, well it's a half-truth anyway. I had planned on her seeing me waiting in just a towel...

"I decided to invite you when I ordered breakfast for eight thirty, I was going to have a shower, and then phone your room and invite you, but you just beat me to it." Liar Lordie, you liar...

Chapter 5:

He came out looking like a man on a mission, to make every female who meets him swoon at his feet. That task is accomplished, wow he's hot even in sweatpants and baggy top, shush be professional Penelope, as I look at that area again, he has a hard on, did I do that to him? Hell, he has... Business, think of dull and boring business Penny, think business.

Great, it's not working, and I'm fail miserably not looking at him and blushing, 'cos all I can think of is the daydream I am now having, yup, I'm riding him hard. I've never ever felt this way before, and I don't like not being in total control of my pent up, sex drive. He talks, and I sit down crossing my legs and my sex throbs, yes it throbs at the memory of him and that naked arse, and oh his none too shabby front appendage. He speaks and my dreams tumble into reality!

"Right have you come up with a plan?" Hell yes, to get you drunk, then we roll around on this sheepskin rug, then I will let you take me and have sex with you all day long. I shake my head and shake the floozy me out of it. We have to work to save his career, not implement my sexual fantasies and lusting after the party package!

"I have, but it hinges on two things do the Yorkers want shot of you and do the Lions want to take you on, without this starting point I don't know which way it will go. I'll make some phone calls. Have you got any clue as to how either will pan-out?"

"The Yorkers are willing to let me out of my contract, but the Lions aren't willing to budge on the price they want to pay for me, and the Yorkers won't lower their asking price. Also, there is the small fact that the Lions don't want the publicity nightmare I've rained down these past seven months. There is some paperwork in the top drawer there. My management team want me to stay here, they reckon it's a great new contract, and they are willing to cut their fees to keep me here, but things at home take precedence and Penny that's the only factor that needs considering in all this mess, that you please get me home Baby."

Baby? I think I have found the man, the hunk, the stud and now I'm wondering if it comes with the sex? Oh Suzie Q, you were so right, I did need to jump on the plane. I know this for certain because he just called me baby, and it wacked me straight in the heart like cupid's arrow, yes it sounds so stupid him saying that one word, but it was how he said it so softly and sincere, it just made my heart zing, and still it zings.

"You can always leave your management company, you're into your fourth year of a five year contract. I ran through your contract with the company yesterday and they are misleading you, you have less than the required eighteen months' notice you need to give them left to run, it's there but hidden. Besides that, there is also a clause for mismanagement, again, it too is well hidden in legal jargon. I think either way you have every reason to leave them. They want you to re-sign with them, that's why they want you to sign the new Yorkers contract. Should you move back home you would no longer have need of their shoddy overpriced services. Did you really not read your contract, and why did you not have proper legal advice Ben?"

"I signed the original papers with Dad, but then he died three years before I signed my first professional contract. I was a minor and he signed all the paperwork at seventeen, with Hart and Co, because they gave me a decent scholarship deal. Then when I graduated, I came here. At twenty, as you can see, I signed a five-year contract with them. They did everything for me, even taking over all my immediate needs like finding me and getting me a lawyer, an accountant, they helped in buying me this place.

Dumb move on my part using the people they recommended, right? I'm not dumb Penny, well I come across as an arse, but all I really wanted to do, and it is all I have ever wanted to do, you know play ball? I signed everything they gave me to sign, all under my lawyer's advisement. I thought I was taking good advice, though that was all wrong, especially if I'm hearing you correctly?"

"We'll see, it may not be all bad. I still have some digging to do and I need access to all your files and paperwork Ben. Why did you not tell them what you wanted Ben? I'm sure they would have helped you to get a move. Anyway, that's in the past now, now we push onwards and upwards. It's looking like how much both teams are willing to settle on and how soon we can get your image back." He looks like he's lost his puppy dog, only I've found it and won't give it him back, he's both sad and angry at the same time, poor Ben.

"I was told by Miss Walsh, Angela, they would not entertain it. I trusted her because she was supposed to be on my side. I sort of blindsided myself by wallowing in self-pity and booze, it was not a good combination." He hands me an envelope full of letters, emails, faxes and phone bills. I'm even amazed he has all this paperwork, this isn't normal, and it sets the alarm bells ringing, in fact this is worrying me. I need a couple of hours and access to all his files. "Miss Walsh left that and this, when she left me at the beginning of November, she was a useless assistant, who refused to go for my laundry. Are they any good Penny?"

He passes me the memory stick, and as he leans over my shoulder, his cheek brushes mine. I know he heard that sigh, because I heard it too. I glanced through the paperwork and upload from the memory stick. I read the contents of the first file I open, and I am shocked at what his management company have done and are still doing to his money and career. I was right they are using him as a cash cow, looking after their own interests, not Ben's, as I pointed out to Howarth yesterday. Why was I not more on the ball yesterday? I was drunk and hangover at that very important meeting, damn it, Penny, that's why.

Miss Walsh she wasn't not, doing her job, she didn't know how to do her job, because she was simply brought in to seduce him, and her failure to do so resulted in her removal. They had tried to replace her, but Ben has refused all further assistants sent to him. These papers and this stick belong to Mr Robert Howarth. I drank coffee, putting in order all the correspondence and matched dates with incidents leaked to the papers, hmmm interesting! They were telling the press where he was drinking and with whom. Right, some serious work is needed because there are a ton of papers to read, papers I don't think Miss Walsh meant to leave. They are a great help in helping me, and more than I expected to find. According to the paperwork there are masses of room in both teams offer for negotiation, in either his staying or going.

I make a quick phone call to the team office and asked if the records his management team had yesterday were still there, by pure luck and chance they were. I then asked that they try to keep back the files, as it was important that I check some facts and figures. I asked that they are locked away until I got there, I was lucky calling when I did, as they were being picked up by courier within the hour, I breathed a sigh of relief as the woman in Mr De Witt's office says she's on it and will see me later. Ben sits and eats his breakfast, as I make the calls.

"Would you be willing to play for less pay in California? I could factor a smaller wage into it and get you bigger sponsorship deals to make up the shortfall, also asking them to take another five recent of your sponsorship revenue, however, you're going to have to work at being a good boy for quite a while, especially being more discreet with whom you date and where you are seen with them. Do you not know any homey school teacher types? You know ones you could be seen about town with, perhaps a take home to Mom, type of good girl?" He laughed.

Chapter 5 :B:

No. I want a hot opinionated English woman wrapped in my arms and as soon as possible. I look at the picture again and yep there is a wonton look in her eyes and mine too, I'm not wrong it's there and I see it. Let me see if this gets arise from my fiery new manager, who will be mixing our business with our pleasure, I may even get her signing her own contract, a marriage contract, let those negotiations begin.

"I was out with a hot blonde last night, perhaps she will be the one I need? In fact, I know she calms certain things down in me, but other things I've no control over. What a shame though, according to the post she was too drunk to stand up on her own and yet I still dragged her into the bar for more."

Chapter 6:

He showed me a picture, holy crap, that's me. It must have been taken when I fell out of the cab and into his arms. Did I really look into his eyes like that? It's there, I did and he's laughing at the story again damn him. On the other hand, is there something else going on in that head of his, he has that look about him again?

"Shit, that's going to look really good to your bosses when I go to the stadium later. Not at all like the professional person I normally am. I hate the paparazzi they are scum sucking, bottom feeding leeches." He's laughing at me again. "Ben, quit laughing, I'm serious, this is my job and not how I normally work, but since seeing you yesterday, I have been acting so damned unprofessional, you drive me into a state of bloody distraction, and let me tell you I am not normally this distracted from the task in hand. I am being now though. I'm going to have to pull myself together and fast. I hate being so amateurish, I never have been before, never in my working career have I ever done this I swear, it's you." He's still laughing.

"Eat Penny, we have a busy day and breakfast is important." He smiles at me over the paper.

"Yes Sir, that bloody photo really has made me look so unprofessional."

"That photo dear Penny, is being framed and I may have to have it blown up onto canvas, the day you fell for me." I see the smile, and he's deadpan serious. Hell, what's going on, are we flirting are we going to that place?

I grab a plate and start on the eggs and bacon, all eagerly stuffed on a roll, I'm so hungry I eat even more. I'm filled with a ton of frustration. I'm pissed off with myself and my gross, slip shoddy, slapdash handling of myself and my client over the last couple of days. Another coffee drank, and I use his bathroom. Shutting the door, I have a nosey through his cupboards, there are no secrets hidden from me in here, no drugs and good, a plentiful supply of condoms, again it is good that he practises safe sex with his myriad of models and bimbo's, who could be up to no good, and are these Bimbo's and using him as a meal ticket? I use the toilet flush, wash and wipe. I suddenly feel nauseous and a wave of jealousy passes through my thoughts that I want him to be using those on me and just me. What has he done to me? I go back in and decide to see where this is going. Damn it, a week is going to be a long, long time if nothing happens and too short if it does.

"Right, let's get to the stadium and try to hammer their asking price down. Do you drive Ben, because we have places and people to see today and for the week!"

I could do with jogging there to get rid of these raging pent up sexual feelings I have. I've started to think that they are meant to be acted upon, these none to wholesome thoughts I have been fighting hard against since he walked into that damned office. Thoughts that go against everything I hold dear and thoughts I can't stop even if I wanted too, I'm going to burn in the pits of hell for this, and do you know what I don't care anymore, because sheisk, Suzie is right, I need to have at least one night of breath taking, no holds barred, wild passionate sex before I die, and who better to do that with than the grinning idiot sat right there.

"I do as a matter of fact Milady, come on the cars are in the garage, but I usually jog there and back." We take the lift to the basement for yet more surprises, he drives a Cadillac Escalade and he has a sports car, an Audi R8, a very nice car. "Jump in the front Penelope." He's laughing at me again, why, what have I done now? "Do you want to drive?" I shake my head no. I want to ogle you sat at your side. That's why he's laughing, shit it's the wrong door and I look a fool. He's doing a lot of that, laughing at me. I climb in the passenger door and as I do, he takes a call from Dan, he has his phone on speaker whilst he drives out of the parking structure.

"Be a good mate and get me Lady P's number, we have unfinished business and I've got to speak to her, it's really important. You disappeared with her pretty sharp, did the party package lead you on again Benny boy? You better not have parted with my Pen?" He's going red and me? I'm seething.

"I'm not sure about that one Dan, the lady in question is here with me now, and we are on speaker, ask her yourself." I laugh. Dan mentioned Ben's party package really a party package, what next? These two are driving me potty.

"Pen, sorry about being an arse last night. I need to speak to you. I need to be getting back to England Pen because I've had it with being here in America. I need to get back home and playing in England. What can you do Pen?"

Being an arse and just last night? He's still an arse now but on the phone. I should tell him I know why he's being an arse, and that his ex-wife and brother are about to get married, and that I know his son is really his nephew. All this I found out from his sister, Rachael. She says he was devastated. As I imagine he would be, he loves his little boy and that's why he's started drinking. He wants to get back, because his mother is fraught with worry about her grandson, he's being hurt in all their mess, that poor boy had just found out his beloved daddy is really his uncle. His uncle, whom he hates, is now his daddy.

His mother told him in an argument some hurtful home truths, and he ran away to grandma's house, a grandma who still has him. He is acting up for his slut of a mother, who deserves to lose him too. His relatives have brought him up, whilst they live the high life on Dan's money, all the holidays and trips and the bloody shopping she does. Boy is she in for a rude awakening next week when she marries his brother; she loses her allowance when she marries, because she definitely had a crap lawyer. Dan though had help. His was good and had clauses written into her divorce agreement, how good was I? Very...

"It depends, I've not looked at your stats whilst you have been here. I'll have a look-see, and maybe if I can, I will fit looking at them in between doing Ben again, he's Lordie Lord for a reason, aren't you Ben? He wore me out last night, thank you Ben, we have to do that some more? Oh, and as to being yours Dan, not in a million years, you're a soccer slut. I however, being the consummate manager, will look into it for you.

I'll see if I can get you back, but I highly doubt you're Premiership material anymore, and I doubt Championship either, you may be looking at Division One. I'll run you through the system. What have you done to warrant the urgent need to get back to England Dan? Whose wife have you been sleeping with this time? Please tell me you're not stupid enough to have shit in the same litter tray as yet another teammate, not again?" I doubt he will tell me the truth.

"Well, I may have pissed in the same tray once or twice, but nothing else." Shit he has done it again, has the stupid idiot still not learned to keep it in his trousers?

"Your contract is up here when, and who is your agent here? Inbox me your details, you have my email address, it's not changed and no you're not having my phone number. I'm well past getting out of bed at stupid o'clock to sort your shit out. Leave it with me, try to be clever and keep your tool out of other players' wives. Bye." I disconnect, and Ben is still grinning. "That man is an idiot, sorry for leading him to think we were, err, intimate, but I like winding him up, and please don't give him my number. I've issues with people having my private number. Right who's dealing with you at your management company?" He's still grinning like a Cheshire cat at me. Oh hell, I remember the things I said to Dan oops. Where has all my professionalism gone to in the past two days?

"At the moment that guy Howarth, but he doesn't seem that interested though."

"Um, how many times have you called and been ignored?"

"About a dozen times in the past few days and the replies have always been through a third party."

"Right you need to fire your management team, are you sure you don't want to stop here in New York? It's a good contract, and there is room to negotiate for plenty more."

"No Penny, I can't stress the importance of me being home."

"Another thing, I need to be able to tell them about your mother's condition, and threaten them with going public with their harsh treatment, in this your hour of need, if they don't allow you to move?" I think it will be fine, he's wanted but I just have to make the bad boy, good again. No problem then, phew.

"No, she's not aware she's dying, she thinks they got the tumour and that she's fine and in recovery. So, no Penny please, you will have to find another way." That would have been the best counter strike.

We pull up in the player's car park and we ride through the gates. I tell him to buckle down and get his head back in the game. I head to see the person who has been dealing with his transfer request, as I do he slaps my backside as I turn and leave, so I feign hurt and smack his right back, so mature of us. He whistles a happy tune as he leaves me to go one way and I go the other.

"See you later Manager Lady be good! I will be, I promise Milady." I bet he will. I go towards the offices with a spring in my Jimmy Choo's, it's good to be me.

"Hello, can I please see Mr De Witt? I'm Benjamin Lord's agent, as of today, and I need and would like to sort out some facts and figures." I wait a whole hour before I'm finally shown through, and Ben's files are on the all on the table.

"Hello, Miss Daniels pleased to meet you again. Trudy my PA says your Ben's new management consultant, are his old team aware of this fact?"

"No not as yet, but he's said he wishes to leave their management today. Therefore, I'll be couriering over his request to leave them today, they will have his written wish to cancel their contract to represent him later. Firstly, I need to sort through some things I found out yesterday, and today. When I've done a couple of things and phoned a few people I'll know more. I don't know what sort of financial position he's in, or what the illegal things they have done to him are, but I think it's pretty bad. Ben is in a mess, a financial one and I think a legal one, they may have done a few things that are not so, Kosher?

Until I go through a few of their files and match things with a couple of files I now have. Files I happened across this morning, but until that is done, I won't know the full extent of the mess he's actually in. I thought it was just a matter of sorting Ben out, not all his paperwork and his contracts from five years ago and all those with all his sponsors old and new. Mr De Witt, I need to do some serious fact finding, some of which may impale on the club too. Can I count on your support?" He smiles and asks me to explain everything and not to leave anything out.

"I've found several things I'm not happy with, for one they have very questionable legal ethics, such as Ben's lawyer and accountant being part of a subsidiary of Hart and Co, cleverly hidden and a very much a conflict of any client's interest. They earn up to as much as fifty per cent of his earnings. He has been paying well over the odds for their services and his lists of charitable donations are a bit iffy too. I've paperwork telling the old assistant, if you can call her that, to be 'friendly with him' in order for them to control him and his finances, more. He had his wages paid into an account back in late August or early October and they have no access to it so that is safe, but they do control his personal sponsorship deals. I think this is a massive fraud." He sighs, and I think he knows these things too.

"They, in allowing his asinine behaviour to continue and for so long, were very unprofessional in allowing it to escalate as they did, but the reasons they allowed it to continue, were and are unforgivable, they need him to sign a new contract with you and are willing to do anything to get his signature. The stories in the papers are set ups on their part and instigated by them to cause him harm, they have people working for them in the newspapers, they have photographers on the books too, they were to use photographs of him and his assistant in bed together, fortunately she didn't do anything for him, that was a good thing really, because they were going to blackmail him into stopping here.

When that failed to show him in a bad light, they stepped up the media hate campaign against him to show him in a bad light to the owner of the LA Lions. He has been coming across as a paparazzi beating thug, who drinks himself into oblivion every night and it's all lies, but the super strict owner of the Lions has strict moral codes, which he lives by apparently, and has noted the media stories about his would-be player, and raised the red flags and Ben is not looking too good to Mr Morality Lion Man. I wouldn't want him either if I saw the press reports Ben has been getting recently.

So they were about to win and Ben would have had no other choice but to re-sign with yourselves and them. The fact that Ben himself was the one to get me here says a lot about how he rates them as management, he knows what he did was stupid, but he needs to get home, he needs his family around him and it's killing him now being away from them, if he has to stay here, he will run himself and his reputation as a ball player into the ground, please trust me he will do it, his need is just so crucial to his returning home.

When I walked into that meeting yesterday, it by the by the way was a waste of time, he's not been drunk in a long time, you know this too because his reports don't lie. He only ever drinks the odd light and has done since August. When I was out with him last night, he was totally sober, when we got to the bar and when we left the bar. I had not been heavily drinking last night either and certainly not when the photograph was taken, and yet I was made out to be the hot drunken girlfriend, who he had escorted into a bar, to pour yet more alcohol down her/my throat." He smiles at me and shows me the paper in front of him.

"That was to be my next question. We all read the stories they put out, and most people tend to believe what they see and read. We the public, we take these gutter rags to be the printer of whole truths and nothing but reality, sad but true. Most sane people however see it for what it is, pure gossip and fictitious writings of the gutter press. The few who don't though, are unfortunately the people who buy the products that Ben endorses and there lies the crux of the problem, the fall in revenues from advertising campaigns he's featured in are hurting their sales, so it means they are set to dump him and then his wages follow the same pathway, heading lower and lower until we can't afford to keep him. Do you think they were behind the set up last night?"

"I think, no I know they were. They have tipped the press off on all Ben's worst nights too. They need me to look unprofessional and being a drunk tends to do that. They thought I was just a stupid girl, who didn't know her stuff when I first walked into that meeting. I was hung-over for that meeting and I'm sorry for that, but I wasn't actually planning to come here at all. It was just a spare of the moment thing. I don't think they were expecting me to run interference, and certainly not as quickly as I did. They certainly don't know how much I've uncovered about the massive fraud they are committing, nor that we know the lengths they will go to and have gone to, to keep him signed to them. My client however will always be my number one priority." He shows me a file.

"Ben came to me a week ago saying he wanted to hire you, and he didn't know how to get you over and asked me to help. I quite like Ben, he's a good but confused young man, torn between his family whom I know need him, he thinks I don't know but there isn't a lot that passes these old eyes including, how the pair of you look at each other. He's a complicated and emotional young man. His only bad point is he needs to stop thinking that he's letting people down. He needs to think of his own needs and those of his family.

He desperately wants out of his contract here, that much I do know. Why? Well he may let me in on that reason eventually, but I have a feeling it's his mom's poor health. Until then I'll work closely with you to sort our young man out and get him back home. That file is all we were able to find out, most you have already found out, but if you give me what you have later, we can get the right people in and sort this mess out and quickly." I agree to share all I find out when I sort through the whole mess before me. I have read their file on the few discussions they have had about his new contracts and the ones from the Lions and all their counter offers.

"They told him the price you wanted wasn't up for discussion, and there wasn't any room for any further negotiations about the percentages and wages deals that you both want from the possible transfer. Can I ask are these the latest offers correct? What are you willing accept and what are your realistic expectations on price? Expectations, I might add, for a player who has now only eleven months left on his contract?" He laughed at me.

"Obviously, we expect a good shake of the tree, he's still a major asset of the club, but he has never been happy here. He's more of a hometown type of guy, as you said he misses his family, which interferes with his state of mind. He should have signed with Lions when he left college, it would have been better for him. Though that said, he has been a great player here. He gives all that he has to the game, and each game he plays to the very best he can. He plays well, and he still has a good ten years play left in him, pitchers wear out a lot quicker in this game than the hitters and catchers, given their shoulder problems.

That said he has brought in plenty of revenues, but if his main sponsors were to drop him it would cause our revenue to drop also, and it wouldn't be a viable option to keep him. I will also add that a new contract would not be coming his way with us either, if his attitude and his sponsors were not back on side, after all that's what pays his wages at the end of the day and he gets paid mega bucks for a reason Miss Daniels. I expect top dollar for him, whether his contract is running out or not, because he's that good when he's on form, and he will be again, he's not stupid enough to ruin his career, he loves playing too much. Either way, if the Lions don't want him and you can't change their minds he will need to stay here and get his head back in the game, medical bills don't come cheap.

So the figures there, are fair and honest ones, based on what I know he's capable of, and that's only when he picks himself up and starts doing what's right for him and this club, a fair price to leave and a good one if he has to stay, though if he has to stay there is a large house being used to sweeten the deal here, one that is big enough for the whole family to move into and near a very nice hospital." He hands me a breakdown of figures, and I take some time to study them. Wow he has a massive earning potential and already earns in excess of a hundred million a year. Holy cow these are stupid amounts of money for throwing a cork ball. Ben should have come and seen Mr De Witt he knows his mother is ill.

"Can I use the phones and make some calls and set up somewhere? I really need to work out a better and more appropriate plan of action, now I know what I'm up against. Do you have a list of people requesting special visits and any charities, affiliated to the team? I, sorry, we need to get him back on the ball, you want the best price possible and they want a near perfect person and package for that price. What's better than his seeing people who are worse off than he is, use his own stupidity to bring him around, his self-destruction and loathing, should disappear when he sees people with genuine problems any remaining issues he has going on in his thick skull should dissipate.

Especially when he thinks about what he has, and what they have are nothing alike. He needs to see for himself what he can do to help them and feel better about himself. I should point out too, there are going to be photographs of him coming in and out of various clinics and centres, one of which he will be getting help at, but the others are for the benefit of the people he's visiting. I've had several personal appeals from schools, sick children and children's groups for him to go see them. Something he wanted to do, but his management team put him off doing. Oh, and I meant to ask, how many of your other players do they represent?" He smiled.

"We're on it thanks to you. After watching you in action yesterday and the responses we saw on their faces, we figured they were behind most of this and we're having the other players checked out too, thank you. There's an office at the end of the corridor, please use that. Ben will be up after practice and if you need anything let Trudy know, the other things you asked for are waiting in the office, their files are there too for you. They tried to pick them up straight after your phone call. Funny thing is we couldn't find them, and they are coming at four for them. You have until then with them and good luck. There is a fax and several phones in there too and a video conference phone set up, should you need it. Well good hunting Miss Daniels," I got up shook his hand and went in search of the office.

An hour later and the files are all organised. Now I need to buckle down and search. I look at the clock, and it's one o'clock. I've three hours left to photocopy and document his files. They are after all the property of his old management team. I first cancel all banking authorities on all but his mother's account. I've accountants working on that side of things and they are recommended by Trudy. I then cancelled their contract with Ben and severed all ties. Hart and Co will have received the paperwork now, receiving it by email, fax and couriered to them, all forms of receiving it have been used. I check the tracking, and they have now in their possession, documentation cancelling his contract, with clear and legal reasons for him doing so, plainly showing themselves as reasons for cancelling their hold on him. I eagerly await their responses.

I find out to my horror the depths they have sunk to, and I begin my report as the minutes tick away, I find more and more. I've had to hire a forensic accountant's team too because this has gone a whole lot wider than just Ben, a hell of a lot more people are involved, more money than I first thought has been stolen too, millions more. A legal team to represent Ben is on board, I'm using the one recommended again, by Trudy, the same as the one the other non-Hart people use, he needs them, as this is a mammoth task and the deeper I dig, the more problems I find. This is a major fraud case and involves millions of dollars, not just Ben's money is involved now either, my headaches again. I've a thick file and one hell of a lot of information. I download it all, close down my laptop, then lock it and the file in my briefcase, in the bottom drawer and go in search of Ben. It's three o'clock and I need food.

Twenty people and charities and schools are going to be given the best of Ben's charm and wit, well at least for the next week, given that it's the closed season and the preseason games are not yet being played, there are still fans coming for a hope of catching the practices as there are players here every day. Tour groups come in every day too, so there will be plenty of meet and greets. A tentative phone call to the LA Lions and they are very eager to begin discussions and are more than willing to speak to him in a week. They email me their newest offer and it's brilliant, they agree to my all terms and conditions, all we have to do is turn up next week complete a medical and then sign.

Their team owner, though strange, is a good man. Their legal man is a sweetheart and explains all the legal terms to me slowly. I've not the heart to tell him I'm as qualified to do his job, as he is. He says it all this depends on the publicity surrounding Ben, which could prove to be the greatest obstacle for the owner. I'd asked for a week to show he is willing to work hard and prove he has already started the change needed. My assurances are given, that this week there will be nothing other than glowing reports on Ben. I've a lot of work to do now to sure up my promises and it is such a short time to do it in, give me a month and I'd have him running for office, but a week is all I have, shit a week is just seven days, am I mad?

One week from today is decision day. I need to get this plan together and fast. I go in search of Ben. A security guard takes me pitch side and I watch as he throws the ball again and again. Apparently, he's good, from the conversations I am sitting and listening to, from the excited kids watching the show behind me in the stands. They idolise the six-foot pitcher. He sees me, and waves and the kids go mad as he comes across. I grab a marker pen and a pad of paper from my handbag, as the kids scream louder for his autograph. Pictures are taken on their phones of them with their hero, step one on the road to the redemption of Benjamin David Lord. Lordie Lord has a lot of ground to cover this week and I'm not mixing into that schedule any romance or flings of the sexual kind, mores' the pity.

"Everything is set. You have a meeting next week to begin final contract negotiations and we have a week of making well on seven months of crap. I've set you up a new Facebook page and Twitter account and I know it's not your thing, but we are short of time, and so we are going to use the media to make good your name, we will use them to your advantage. We will not be giving them any bad press at all. The one thing I ask of you is that you behave, keep a tight hold on that temper and let me do the talking. There are going to be photographers, fans and paparazzi snapping all week, you have to be on your best behaviour, at all times."

"Yes Milady, I am your obedient slave. I can't get over what you have done in half a day. We can fly down after practice Monday. That's if, you're actually coming with me, I know you said you were stopping a week, but can you stop a little longer?" Wait until he finds out the completely horrendous mess he's actually in. I could be here a month good for me, because I have a month to get to know him better.

"Lordie, Ben, Ben can you sign my ball please?" More kids come from the stands, and swept along in their enthusiasm, he smiles and poses for photos, giving in to their demands for autographs, most of the photos most are already on his Facebook page, thank you iPhone. I grab a pen and paper; he signs and spends an hour with the kids.

"That was really good, but I needed to go shower. What've we got planned for this afternoon Milady?"

"You're in anger management and will be photographed going in, no doubt leaving too, so hold it back Lordie." He smiles.

"So what are you saying Penny, I have anger issues? I'm astounded you think so lowly of me. Wait, does that mean that throwing glass bottles at them is a no then? Seriously are you sure about this Penny, will it not be bad publicity?" Reassurances are needed.

Hopefully seeing these children will make him think again about the bad temper outbursts, if the kids consent to photos all the better. I've ordered a batch of Yorkers tops, caps and baseballs. A little clichéd but it works, and this has worked for me before. I'll get him signing them, and I've a special request from a young boy he's seeing today, for a baseball. He'd lost his whole family, in a drunk driving accident and his aunt had asked for a visit, before she has to take him back to Manchester, in England to live with her. He is losing his home too. Trudy has given me a whole gift bag of goodies, angel that she is. It seems she too mothers Ben.

"No, on the contrary it will be all good, it will show that you know you have a problem and are actively seeking help with it, correctly, openly and responsibly. Besides the one you're attending today is for a child, whose immediate family members have all died and whose life is now in turmoil and he's in a great deal of pain at his devastating loss, he's suffering from something called survivor guilt.

So inside it's just you and the boy, one of the sessions you are going to will be actual for you, but they won't know which, besides you may not need an actual session, once you see you haven't got a serious problem, and don't look at me with those puppy dog eyes please. You know you don't have a real problem. Be good or I will turn all mad woman on you again and kick your arse Ben Lord."

"Wow alright I was just going to ask you do you want to eat before we go. I don't like you when you're angry with me, you were like my sisters, all four of them with P.M.T. at the same time, weren't as angry as you were with me yesterday. I nearly threw you chocolate and a hot water bottle."

"Funny hahaha, you don't want to offer me chocolate when I'm getting my monthly visit, I will bite your hand off before you can pass it me and never nick my stash, I nearly killed Suzie Q when she had the Dairy Milk Bar that I'd hidden, wow did I throw a fit, and now I'm embarrassed because I'm talking about monthly's with you, damn it Ben, remember our work place boundaries."

"I know not of such boundaries Milady, because I have four older sisters and they push all the embarrass-me-buttons and cross all sorts of inappropriate boundaries, when they picked on me. Penny they live to embarrass me, so go figure I know about the curse, the mingy time, the red mist time, red letter day, the monthly's. You find a name for your damned menstrual cycle, and those girls have used it and they have hauled me over the coals about having it, and more than once or twice too. Believe me in my scared male life. All my sisters have made me pay dearly for being a boy and escaping the pain they feel every sodding month, and no I'm not embarrassed at all, because they do embarrassment way harsher than you. Believe me you're a pussy cat compared to them, because they are damned near feral mountain wild cats." Okay then I don't suppose it was much fun being a lad in a house full of girls. "Okay then honorary sister, I will see you in a short while let me pack up and I will see you up there, hurry I'm starving hungry."

I give him a wave as he leaves to shower, and I get back to work. Bob Howarth is in the office I've been given to work in, when I eventually find my bloody way back, he is rummaging through the files, but it won't help him, my laptop and iPad are both password protected and locked away, and my scribbled notes are in my own shorthand.

"Good afternoon, how can I help you, Mr Howarth?" He looks angry, obviously, they have received the paperwork I couriered over to them breaking Ben's ties with the company. He knows, and I know that he's talking out of his arrogant arse. They are up shit creek without a paddle. All payments to the old firm have stopped, and they have no access to any of his accounts, they go directly to his personal checking account until we sort out other banking arrangements for the funds owed to him from his sponsorship deals. I have stopped all access to them touching one more penny, sorry, cent of his earnings.

"Well aren't you the quick worker then? This won't stand up in court, when we sue his arse. Are you all his management team now, just you on your own? You Miss, you will regret ever double-crossing me, as will Ben. He should have left well alone. Actually, you both should have." He looks menacingly at me and he actually has me worried.

"I think Mr Howarth, it will be you who will we regret double crossing your clients, are the others aware how underhanded you have been? As to Ben, I think we look forward to suing you and the firm for fraud and mismanagement of fees and funds, that you have taken from several of his accounts without his knowledge, or when permission was signed, when he was under the effects of alcohol, all very illegal moves on your part, a person has to be of sound mind when signing legal documents."

I show him duplicates of the letters and statements I had been working on during the night and from today's mammoth finds. He looks worried and he has every reason to be so too. The depths they have sunk to get money from him are horrendous. The forensic accountant and lawyer are already finding wonderful and damning facts and figures and are on their case big time. American companies really do work quickly, thankfully for us.

"You're going to be sorry you crossed me bitch, I told Junior you would be trouble yesterday, I didn't realise just how much trouble though, and you're not so stupid are you bitch? This isn't over by any means. Damn you have poked a stick into a wasp's nest little girl, you're going to be really sorry you stuck your fucking nose into our business, fucking sorry."

That didn't seem like a hollow threat to me, and I shiver at the look in his eyes, how deep does this go and who else is involved? Ben catches the last part of the conversation and signals for the security, he has not yet showered and is still in his uniform, he cuts a fine figure in his uniform. I am so screwed right now. What have I started, with both Ben and Howarth?

"Escort this man out, and from now on nobody from his firm get past security, pull all their passes, and badges cancel the lot. You, you touch one hair on her head, and you will have me to deal with. You've already pissed me off. You're a leech, get out and keep away. You've had your one and only warning and tell Master William Hart Junior, that I know shit about him too." He's marched away from the building. "Are you alright Penny, did he hurt you? I saw him coming in when you left the field. What did you do to make him so pissed at you?" He pulls me into his arms. I need a hug. Oh, hell he smells so nice um-sweaty man and a faint whiff of coconut and spices.

"I found out he has been underpaying your fees to your account, he hasn't been forthcoming with taxes and he has been siphoning money from all your accounts. Your wages are still safe though as they are paid into a joint account with Terri. That hasn't been touched at all. You needed new accountants, but for now everything goes into the safe account with Terri, I figured you trust her with your mother, so your money should be safe with her too?" He agrees with a nod of his head and continues to hold me. "I've got specialist people involved now, people who are running through the past five years of your finances for you, working hard as we speak, and the lawyers are looking at getting it back for you and trying to clarify things with the Inland Revenue, sorry whoever your tax people are here, but this is bigger than just you, this could be going on with all their clients Ben all of them. The basketball players, the soccer players, other baseball players, and football players too. I don't know how many others nor how widespread and deep this goes. I just know it's a lot of money. How did you not know?"

"That's an easy question to answer, Mom will tell you, because I'm a fool with my money and too trusting of people, and well I always have enough and I've as you say, the other account set aside just for Mom, they can't touch that, it's from the bank at home. Nobody but me and Terri can access that account, it's been dealing with all Mom's medical bills? So how much do you reckon they have had off me?"

"About fourteen million, actual money and they have understated your actual earnings to the tax people, so you owe them, and they pocketed that too. Did you really not notice?" He looks angry, and he is shaking his head. "If they have a hundred and fifty clients say, they don't, it's in the thousands and they take the same amount from them, we are talking big business, really big business Ben." I don't want to think about the enormity of it all. Mr De Witt has everything that I've found out and is as astounded by all this as I am, more so because this has been going on with two other players too and they too have been passed on to new management, using the same get out clauses as Ben, getting new accountants, and legal teams in too.

He apologizes for the smell and goes to shower as I pack up my things. What smell Ben, that was a sexy beast man smell, or was I mistaken? We leave with boxes full of signed shirts, balls and caps. The other players have signed a shirt, including a catcher's mitt ball and bat for Thomas, the little boy whom I hope will turn Ben's life around permanently. Pulling up to the building, we deliberately park down the street, so we have to run the gauntlet of the press. I've the bag of goodies for the boy Thomas in my hand, as we walk, we're holding hands on our way there.

"Who's the blonde, your new girl Ben? What is her name? Why are you here? Have you got issues, party boy? Awe, come on Ben who is she? Who are you, are you the mysterious blonde girl from last night? Aren't you the drunken lush from last night? Ben two dates this one must be special. Ben, Ben." He holds my hand tightly and opens the door for me.

"Congratulations, that was the toughest part, they'll wait for us to leave the building and we do it all again."

"I'm sorry you got dragged into this Penny." He leans down and kisses my cheek. I promised I wouldn't do it, but as he turns away slowly. I turn and kiss him back, it's a full-on mouth-to-mouth rescue. He goes to return the kiss, just as the damn cameras flash through the bloody door. Ben smiles and then talks, I am dumbstruck and wow, Sister H was right, I know I have the man, his kiss still has my head sinning, God what a kiss.

"Right, where were we, before your lips interrupted me Milady, so perfectly? Umm, kids and a meeting or two, lets meet these kids then. I love doing this behind closed doors, it's so nice seeing kids, I hate seeing the ones with serious illnesses, sorry that sounded crass. I love meeting them, but their illnesses throw me. Kids with cancer always manage to break my heart, the fact that cancer doesn't have boundaries is, well, it's a great leveller of people.

It doesn't care how rich, poor, old or young you are or if you're gay, straight, male or female, it's a bad, bad disease that knows no bounds. They, however shitty they are feeling, they never show it, that's true courage and one I'm happy to support, however I can, whenever I can and give as much money as a can." I get a cheek kiss as I accept it, he sighs. "The kids, though they put me to shame with what they endure. Maybe it's because they're not aware how really sick they are?

Sometimes, shit, all the time, I'm happy they don't know you know, because knowing would change them, you know have them panicking and worrying. Their poor parents do enough of that for their child, so they don't have too. I follow two youngsters with leukaemia, they run marathons for the cause. Rope me into doing one or two, when we're back home in the summer, that will level me. Who are we seeing first?" He smiles and looks lost in his thoughts. Did I really need to kiss him right then? I look at him as we get in the lift to the clinic.

"I'm sorry Ben that was really unprofessional of me, I won't do it again, I over-stepped my boundaries."

"No, the kiss was just what I needed, as to it not happening again, are you sure? Those kisses were pretty damn nice and if that camera wasn't filming our every move right now, you would be in for a great elevator ride." I blush as his hand holds mine.

"You're meeting Thomas and his Aunt Pippa. Ben, please take things gently with this little boy, be wary of his outbursts and be warned he's an emotional time bomb. He had a bad time last year, and he's about to be taken to live in England. All his family were killed, his mother, father, two brothers and his sister, along with the family dog, he's lucky he was asleep in the back seat of their people carrier. Lucky, because he was knocked out cold and missed the worst of the devastation. He wouldn't be here at all, but for being in the very back seat. They were hit head on by a drunk driver and all were killed instantly."

"Shit, what do I say to him? Shit I can't do this Penelope, that was a hell of a sucker punch you've just pulled, oh that poor kid." Thomas spots him and runs straight at him, not giving Ben a second to think, literally, because he sends Ben flying into the beanbags as he rushes at him.

I have to laugh good job really because it helps Ben just be himself. I say hello to his aunt, who is smiling. He laughs, and they are chatting as if they are great friends and Thomas hasn't seen him in a while, he doesn't let Ben think about what he has had to endure. He throws facts, figures, requests, and bombards him with hugs and smiles, it's quite tearful, I laugh as he finally realises that I'm here too and asks if I'm his girlfriend, to which Ben says I'm and introduces me with a wink.

"That's the first time he has smiled in months thank you. I've asked so many times for him to call and see Tommy, but his management said he was just too busy." I give her a reassuring hug, she seemed to need one, and this must be just as hard on her as she's lost her family too.

"Ben's had some personal issues of his own and he recently changed his management. His old team were keeping him from his fans, in favour of money shots and big events. Whereas he'd personally prefer to do this type of meeting, he loves the time he spends with the children and quietly with no pomp and ceremony. He, believe it or not, is a very private person too."

We sit and have coffee as they chat. I watch as Ben gives him the thing's he has brought for him, which gets him yet more hugs, lucky Thomas. Thomas asks for pictures on his Facebook page, so his friends finally see he wasn't telling lies and Ben Lord was his friend. I asked his Aunt Pippa for permission to use his photos and she loved the idea and asked would it be possible if she could video it for him to play back, when he was an angry episode, which he has all the time.

"Sure, no problem, can you do a video on your phone Penny? I'd like a copy too." I set my laptop up to record their session. I've already uploaded their snaps to both their Facebook page's and he has added him as a friend. I think the social media sites will be Ben's easiest route to forgiveness, they love him. We leave them to it as the computer records their time together.

An hour later and they have finished, and Thomas is wearing his kit and his aunt is happy, I send the file with the talk to his aunt's email account and head off. Ben has already changed and is in awe of the little boy he has just spent an hour and a half with and I promised him a visit when I'm back in England and that I'll get tickets for the football, there are plenty around his soon to be new home. During my talk with Aunty Pippa I find out everything about Thomas and cry as she tells me the dog being asleep on him, was the thing that actually saved his life. Oh hell, did we weep.

"God Penny that was unbearably sad, that little boy has such anger and rightly so, but he handles it, and way better than I do. Shit, he puts me to shame, real shame. He was awake as they were pulling him from the wreck. He saw all the carnage of his family, their being dead in the car with him, he'd sat alone for ages, can you imagine being so alone and waiting for help, thinking your family are sleeping and it's all going to be better when help comes, only it had taken forever, and they were all dead in the end? Those are the nightmares he faces all the time.

He just wants them back, he wants them to be here and he wishes he had died too, poor kid he feels so alone. He's going to live with a stranger and in a strange country, he's very bitter about lots of things, he has ever reason to be too. I wish I were as brave as him. Shit, it doesn't bear thinking about, I'd die if my family were wiped out in one hit and left me alone Penny, we need to keep in touch with him, and often."

Ben has his arm over my shoulder as we run the barrage of abuse and I felt the crowd pushing, shoving and shouting at us for answers to their questions again, this time they have my name and call for a quote. Are we serious, how long have we been dating, is their wedding bells and just how nutty is Ben? I just shout as I get in the car.

"Ignorance is the mother of all presumption gentlemen. Have a good afternoon and I will look forward with great anticipation to reading the stories you send to print and with my keen legal eye too." Ben smiles as we drive off.

"I really enjoyed that, what are we doing after we have eaten, do you fancy seeing a show, or coming to my room? Maybe we could watch a chick flick of your choice? I've a shelf full, my sisters watch them when they come and visit?"

"I don't think that's wise Ben, I don't mix business and pleasure, it doesn't end well, I shouldn't have kissed you earlier. I'm sorry I don't know what came over me. I need to try to keep this professional Ben, and I'm failing miserably. Besides I've got to run Dan through the system and see if I can get him on someone else's books, he was my client last time. I'm not too sure that would be a wise move representing him again. He's a little too demanding of my time, he was twenty-four-seven and for months. I may even farm him off to a pal of mine, who has set up her own company. I'll see you at breakfast, we need a meeting before you go to work, would that be alright?"

"Breakfast it is then, in my rooms at nine and knock this time. I shower before breakfast and after I work out in the gym here." I blush. I had nearly forgotten about that, phew. He takes me for pizza again at my request because it was so nice last night, and we talk. I still have loads to do and as pleasant as the thought of spending an evening with him sounds, I've work to do, so I'm walked to my door and my cheek is kissed and my heart skips a beat literally. I think it stops for the shortest of times, what is he doing to me?

Chapter 6 :B:

I'm glad I was able to save Penny from Howarth's hands, he can be a mean son of a bitch. I fear I may have left this too long and the problems I am facing are too epic for her to tame and manage for me, what else she uncovered has me worried and for him to be so pissed off, I am thinking this is going to be a dirty fight. I will have to be extra good and work hard to help her. I leave her reluctantly, because I've a desperate need to shower. Yes, he's on parade again, what I need to do really is to jump in the ice bath. I shower, change and begin fielding questions from the fellas about the hot piece of skirt.

"That piece of skirt boys, is the future Mrs Lord, so please do not insult my fiancé." I'm now the holder of several of the lads' jocks and dirty towels cheers lads, as I skip out to collect my blonde bombshell, after I'd taken a minute to get the lads to sign my bat, he has my favourite mitt and a ball too. When I see her, I note she has a massive bag of hats and shirts as I pop the newly acquired kit in it.

We pull up a little way down the road, she takes my hand and I wrap her in my arms as they are pushing and shoving her for a story, she smiles in my direction as one of them says I must be serious about her, damn right I'm. We get in and I kiss her cheek debating whether to make it her lips, when she floors me with a kiss, wow... She kisses nicely and as I return the kiss. I'm still shocked she did it. She tells me what I'm here for and I sweat, how can I help this kid when I've not been screwed over like he has? He needs to tell me how he manages the crap that life has thrown him.

We're monitored by a security camera in the elevator, or I would have had her against the wall in here, not that way, not yet anyhow. I want to kiss her again. It is with great trepidation that I go to meet the young man, who from Penny's description has had it bad for months, I don't know what to say to him, but I'm flying butt first into the comfortable beanbag things, as he tackles me to the floor, does he know I play baseball, not football? He laughs and starts about giving me my whole playing record. I listen, and we talk.

Penny leaves Thomas and me in a room alone. He and I talk, and he talks to me the adult, with such maturity, but as he describes that horrific day, the one that made him an orphan. I burst into a flood of years and take the little fella in my arms as he too cries. I think these are the first tears this little boy has cried, as he soaks my tee shirt with his tears. I've nothing but admiration for this brave little man. I'm in awe of him and he finally puts my problems in perspective, and as we take the man pact, he smiles as I agree to come and see him in England and watch his new team over there.

Bolton Wanderers are his uncle's team. I've only heard of the two Manchester teams from Dan. I agree, and if I can't get Penny to stop here, I'll then have a valid excuse for being there with her. As we leave and get in the car, they ask for a quote, and she uses the quote I used on her. Milady is really good at what she does, taking me in hand without making me look like a complete idiot. The next few days are going to have to special and make them count. I need her to know what she means to me already.

She doesn't have time for movies in my room. After we have eaten but has to buckle down and sort out Dan and get a schedule put together for our week. I'd taken her for pizza again and as we sat in the corner booth and chat, I felt the chemistry, she did too. After supper, we head back to her room. I play it cool because I want to pick her up and throw her down on her bed and make out for a while, but I settle for a simple cheek kiss and the promise of breakfast in my room. I joke and tell her to knock and wait. The rosy hue rises on her cheeks. She feels the connection we have. I know she does, but she has told me time and time again business and pleasure doesn't mix. We will see Miss Daniel, we will see.

Chapter 7:

We're going for a picnic for lunch today as Ben has no training today and is having a day off to spend with me and talk through the myriad of problems he's facing. We are to have a pleasant breakfast in his room. I've made more of an effort not to look so uptight, I'm having a jeans and tee shirt day, runners and hair in a ponytail, there is no power suit today. We chat for ages again as we get a battle plan together and get his beautiful head, he has such a beautiful smile, snap out of it Penny and get your head around all the crap he's facing, not imagining yourself wrapped around him.

He's good to talk to, not false or flashy and his family mean the world to him and as he talks I fall deeper, and I know my eyes are staring but so too are his, I just can't trust myself to be alone in this hotel room with him any longer. I'm strong, but not that strong. I make my excuses and ask him to call for me after I do some work on his behalf. I leave him smiling in his room and as I shut the door to his apartment, I swoon again. I need a shower and a damn good, long and cold one too.

He picks me up for lunch as promised and I note he's fresh from the shower and the smell of coconut and cotton waft to my nostrils again. He stops and picks lunch up from a deli and it smells heavenly, I'm starving and could eat a horse. I had a two hour work out of my own hidden under my sheets fantasizing about him and me, I worked myself into a near damn frenzy.

I've never wanted to do that with anyone, so what's different with him, so why is he hitting the spot, over and over, when nobody else ever has? We headed to Central Park for our picnic, an afternoon tea, if you will, carrying the massive box of food, he and I look to find a place to 'cop a squat,' another Pretty Woman moment. We found a place to settle down, and for the rest of the afternoon, we eat, we talk, we plan, and I am falling head over heels in sodding love and I think it may be mutual, I hope so.

He speaks, and I listen and as he lies down on the rug, I want to straddle him, lean down and kiss him, hell fire why am I so lustful, is this normal? I snap back to reality before I do all those things and more to him, with him and for him, God I'm gone. It really is pleasant here, with him, the weather isn't too bad either, but it's not taking the top off and catching a few rays type of weather. I try to reign in the sexy thoughts, but it's getting increasingly more difficult and I can't help myself from looking. He insists we have to eat. Me, I just want to ogle.

"I didn't know what you liked, so I just had them put rolls, cold cuts and slaw, well just about everything, so make up your own thing. There's wine and juice too Milady."

"Juice, we're being photographed it's not a good look, you drinking wine, mid-day in the park. Ben, thank you this looks really nice." He looks in the direction of the photographers.

"When the world ends there will be three types of pests left in the world, cockroaches, paparazzi and lawyers, they're scum and get everywhere. All I want to do is play ball, not have all the crap that comes with it." I smile as he looks into the park. I make him eat and he settles at last, he eats and drinks he chats to me about everything and anything, and by the end of the food he's really chilled and relaxed, even forgetting there are photographers about, we settle on the rug talking.

"I'm a lawyer Ben." I laugh only because I know he was been robbed blind by his last lot and that must be worrying him, whom he can trust and whom he can't. "I'm so shocked you're taking this all so calmly and that you're being so controlled. Are you not ready to pop them with that bottle of very nice and expensive Shiraz?"

"No, my bottle throwing days are a thing of the past, and I didn't mean you were a crappy lawyer, you don't act like my other lawyers because they were thieves and charlatans. Penny, it's easier to keep calm these days, because I've a hot new girl and one who seems to have a calming effect on me, I like feeling like this. I've been so uptight, so damn tense and for too long Penny, thank you, you have made me feel so normal today, thank you." I smile, as he closes his eyes and sighs.

He's beautiful, charming, he's honest, loves his family, cares about things with a genuine passion and he's perfect for me. No, put that back in the box Miss Daniels, you're not going down that path, he's a client. A nice hot, kissable, make me hot between the legs hot client, phooey shoot me please 'cos yes he affects there too. I lay on the rug belly down and l kick off my shoes and flick through the emails and there's nothing from Dan, typical, he's a lazy ass who expects me to do all the bloody running round for him. There is one from work, which I open, I read it and re-read it, crap, I've been dismissed because they say I'm setting up on my own. They are putting into play all the damn clauses in my contract.

"Shit they can't do this to me, they think I'm on holiday, how did they find out I'd taken you on as a client, and why now the bastards? Crap, crap, oh crap. I'm going to get to the bottom of this if it kills me. Christ, I'm jobless and homeless, they've put my home in storage too, crap crapperty crap, crap, crap arghhhh and there's nothing I can do about it until next week either, bugger n blast it, the bastards." The great mood I've been in, has been killed for certain now.

"Why are you homeless, do you not own your own home in Notting Hill Penny? If not, you'll be fine because the fees you get from my transfer and future endorsements will make you wealthy. We're talking, if you take the same as Hart and Co, about five and a half million dollars a year, plus commission, on all the deals you broker for the club and me. If you need to stop here, you can use the apartment, when I move as it'll be empty, but I sort of hoped you'd come to LA with me and work with me there. It seems there's nothing stopping you now." I smile as he joins me on my side of the rug.

"I've been stopping in the company flat since splitting with Garth, but it was always only meant to be temporary stop. I have a house, but I just don't live in it and don't ask me why, well not just yet please? As to working here, I've never dealt with your sport before and football, or rather what you Americans call it, soccer. That's my bread and butter, because that sport I'm good with, but even that's different here, bigger and different, more money is involved lots more. I suppose I could scope some possibilities out, but I've a week to sort you out, or you will be sacking me too."

"Penny stop saying you'll need a week to sort me out, you never know if those fuckers have a listening device, you will do my reputation as a man-whore no damn good. Seriously, though I'll need someone, and we'll see how you feel at the end of the week. Milady it's starting to rain, quick let's get back to the car and thank you for sorting out the visit to see Thomas. It really was the best medicine ever thank you, and again stop with the week to sort me out that will be sorted sooner than that, much sooner Milady."

As we folded the blanket he leaned down and kissed me, and I kissed him back, oh yes, his kisses are as sexy as he has. We kiss for an age as the blanket falls to the floor, my legs nearly collapsed under me. Pulling back, he smiled. I was still feeling his lips on, mine and sodding hell, this is so not keeping business and pleasure apart. Damn it, I don't want to anymore though, I want him, and I know he wants me. How did I get here? I smile as I thank those Mojito Kickers, oh and Suzie Q.

"I, I, I've never done that before."

"I seriously doubt you've never been kissed before, not with what you just did Milady. Besides, it was only a thank you kiss too, my proper kisses, they would have you begging for more, or so my retriever Goldie would have you believe. I can't get enough of my kisses off my little girl." I want more now and lots more, lucky Goldie, well they say it's a dog's life. What a life Goldie has then.

"Am I being compared with another of your bitches again? Wow, your kisses were fine but oh Ben comparing me to your dog, well that's just not on, Lordie." I laugh as he carries the box back. We have loads of food left and as we are heading back, he spots a homeless man. He takes out a few notes from his wallet, and he gives the man the money, the blanket and a box of food.

"Here take this and get somewhere warm for the night. It's forecast to be heavy rain tonight and for a few more nights too." The man thanks him and then takes the money and the box from him.

"Thanks, really, thank you, because there is enough money here to get a place for a couple of weeks are you sure?"

"Yeah, take it please and get somewhere found, the heavens are about to open. We really should do more for you ex-soldiers. Will you be fine getting there, or do you need a lift?" He says there is an apartment block not too far past the park with rooms. He will be able to walk there quicker than we could drive. We leave the man, whom we find out is called Steve, to find his room for a few nights, he thanks Ben again and as he runs off, he stops and shares his good fortune with the others in the park, as we head for the car.

"Thank you for my picnic in the park, it really was nice well, it was better than nice. It was really quite pleasant. Are there a lot of ex-servicemen, homeless and here in the park needing help?" I blush, why does this man do this to me?

"Yes and no, some fall through the cracks, some choose to live this way, for others everyday life gets too much for them, they lose their jobs, then when they can't pay their rents, they get thrown out of their homes. I don't ask for their life stories, some tell me, and if they do, I listen, that's all. Most days I talk to them, I just listen, help if I can and if they let me, some of them can be upset taking charity. Penny as for the picnic, the pleasure was really all mine and thank you. Will you Penny, will you come and have dinner with me? I know you said you were busy. Will you consider perhaps going to Broadway show and dinner? I really had a great day today, and I don't want it to end?" I want to, I want to, I can't do, I just can't do it.

"Yes, that would be nice, what time?"

"I'll ring and let you know what time, when I sort out tickets. Wear something fancy for your man sexy." I laugh.

"Is that man code for slutty looking or revealing? I can never suss men and their definition of what you expect a woman to dress like, so please Ben define fancy for your man sexy for me, in your opinion, just so I know if you like slutty or demure with legs and boobs on show?"

"Baby that's a tall order. You in a towel would be sexy enough, but anything you feel comfortable in and I'm not into the slutty look, demure yeah sure, that works. Please will you just wear something fancy, I intend to wine and dine Milady, like a lady and in style." He leans over and kisses me his tongue gliding over my wonton lips.

Penelope Daniels what are you doing? I respond, and I mean really respond, his kisses are to die for. He peels himself away and drives us back to the hotel, smiling all the way back. What did he say fancy for your man sexy? Hell, I'm in wrong man purgatory. I think I'm about to break a whole bunch of my rules with Benjamin Lord, a whole lot. We pull into his parking space and he dashes around and opens the door, he helps me down and I fall into his arms and get another of his kisses, they really are like chocolate, the more you have, the more you want. I pull away slowly sighing as I do.

"I don't mix business with pleasure, I told you Ben, business partners make for very bad bed buddies."

"Oh, so you were thinking of it too then, the bed lover's bit. I just want the kisses and your company Milady, for now. I'd never say never to your other offer though." Shit, I'd made it sound like that was my idea, was it my idea? I hadn't packed any evening dresses either, so a quick visit to the hotel's designer boutique is in order, to look fancy for my man. He draped his arm over my shoulder in the lift, both it and he felt right. Sister H was right about the kiss too, it was no good I was hooked, my frog kissing is over, and I think my Prince Charming has been found.

"The ground floor please, I've to get something from the reception. Call me when you get the time sorted Ben."

"I'll see you later Milady." He kisses my neck as I step out of the lift, turning around I see he's smiling leaning against the lift wall, looking like a walking advert for sex. He waves his hand from the waistband of his jeans. Thankfully the doors shut before I passed out.

I entered the designer boutique within the hotel, I saw the very dress for me, a black silk dress and jacket, it was beautiful. The I spotted the strapless silver and black dress, elegant but a little too old. I walked towards the next rail and I think I have spotted my favourite, it's a black and white dress with a split to the very top of the leg, it was a little revealing, a little sexier than I had ever had the nerve to wear, sexy yet demure, all in the same dress, and as a bonus I had the jewellery to go with that and the black patent leather Louboutin's with the white tips at the front would be perfect. I handed over my card, only to be told my dress has already been purchased for me.

"Suite 1002 has asked any purchases you make here be charged to the room Miss Daniels." Why had he bought it for me, I've got money? I wondered how he even knew I'd be here. I looked around and he wasn't anywhere watching me. Oh, he's asking for trouble, but not wanting to make a show of myself, or the assistant, I simply smiled and carried the dress bag to my room. I really didn't need Ben to pay for me I have money, just nowhere to live. The phone rang as I get in the room.

"I'll be picking Milady up at seven, I'm really looking forward to our long evening of fun and surprises, I hope you're set for a heady ride? See you later." He didn't let me get a word in edgeways and I could swear he was laughing as he put down the phone. Sounds awfully like he had the same idea as me, we both wanted more than a kiss and I definitely wanted more too? I fired up the laptop and ran Ben's Facebook page, and I'm horrified because there is the whole hour of video, video of Ben and Thomas's chat and comment from his Aunt Pippa.

'Today, this wonderful man gave my nephew the best afternoon he has had in such a long time, please watch the video and you too will see this wonderful man for the caring person he's. Benjamin Lord, thank you for making my darling boy smile for the first time in such a long time, the past months have been so, so hard for him. You were sharing your own personal pain too. In doing so, it showed him it was alright for him to cry, and that it was an okay thing to do all because you cried too. Thanks for making him forget his pain, thank you for telling him that his pain will get better to handle, and thank you for sparing the time to show you care, and... From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all you have done.

I uploaded this, not for publicity as some of you may think, nor to make a show of you Ben, I did it for no other reason, other than to say thank you. I am sorry to show the side of you don't willingly allow people to see, because my dear friend Ben, some people have so wrongly misjudged you, and they need to look at the real Ben Lord. I should have asked, and for that I'm sorry, but Thomas insisted his friend would be cool with it, and as you helped him, he wants to help you too and others like him and he wants you too, to understand that it's okay to ask for help and it's fine for boys and even grown men to cry and share their grief... Thank you Ben, thank you x'

I watched the video, with tears in my eyes and a tissue gripped tightly in my hand. Ben wasn't wrong; he was a truly brave, brave boy I am also listening too, to Ben cry over his dead friends, at the hands of a drunk driver, and of how his dad had been run over and killed because of a drunkard. That makes me cry too. Now I know why he never mentions his father, he is angry and sad, and because when he does talk, the tears, his tears don't stop.

They both made a pact never to drink and drive, to calm their tempers and to stay friends. Ben promises him he will come and see his new home in England. He has a new friend, who is helping him through his anger issues, and she lives in England too, but she likes soccer. Seeing the tears from them both is so sweet to watch, and the little boys smile is intoxicating and makes me smile too. Ben hugs Thomas and then they playfully thump each other's shoulders.

I couldn't have sat through that without crying either. I read the thousands of comments, some are shitty, but most were full of praise for the Yorkers star pitcher, with a big heart. On and on the comments, went, with even more being added as I typed a message to Ben. I'd added two thousand friends last night and we'd hit over fifty thousand in two days. My finger was still busily accepting requests as I receive a call.

"Why did she put the video on Penny, it was a private thing between us two. I just don't know why Penny? It looks like it was a set-up, please tell me it wasn't just a publicity stunt, please?" He's hurt, genuinely hurt, he'd thought the tape was just for him and Thomas and I'd done it for publicity, he feels betrayed by his little friend Thomas and or me too. Poor Ben neither of us set him up and his trust needs clawing back and quickly.

"Ben, if you look on Thomas's Facebook page, his friends have gone up from ten to thousands, because they are sending him messages of encouragement, you did that, you gave him the strength to put it on, because what you don't know about Thomas is Ben, that he has not shown any emotion other than hate and anger. Those tears and the smiles are the first since his parents and siblings died. You did that Ben, by showing him it was okay to be sad and to dry, you cried, and it was alright for him to do it too.

It really was a wonderful thing you did, and it was not a publicity stunt Ben, just a little boy saying thank you the only way he knew how, and you're right it did pull at my heartstrings. I'm in the bath watching it, and my tears are adding to the water level, I'll see you in half an hour. Oh, and add some of your friend requests please, I've a sore finger. See you in thirty minutes." He sighed, had I said enough to alleviate some doubts?

"Sorry Penny I just thought, well you know what I thought, and yes I wouldn't want your finger to ache. I'm having a shower and I'll be up soon."

Stepping out of the bath and into the robe, I had to wonder who'd alerted Ted to me representing Ben, the bastards at Hart and Co, no doubt. They'll get theirs, especially when a full audit of all Ben's accounts is ready. They say they have found some very dodgy dealings and uncovered a major fraud, so then let them squirm. I dried my hair and curled it with a hairbrush, my ass of a friend didn't put in my curling iron, but I'd manage to get it to do loose soft curls and it looked really pretty and nice.

My makeup is done, and the expensive underwear looks amazing. I feel elegant and sexy. I love my sexy underwear, underwear that is just for me and nothing more, there's nothing more to it than I love to feel sexy, but that's old news who knows if I will give Ben a look at them? What am I doing, the old me has fought against this for such a long time? What makes me go stupid with want when I see him?

When I'm near him, I just want to touch him. I'm going to hell for this and no, I'm not sorry at all. I slip my dress on, my shoes go on over the sheerest of stockings. I stood in front of the mirror and I looked like, different, I felt wonderful about myself for the first time in quite a while. The tops of my stockings had two inches of escape from the dress. A knock at the door jolted me from my daydreaming. I let him in and wow, he's without a doubt a hunky, sexy fella.

"Holy cow, you look stunning, really stunning Penny. I don't suppose. No, I couldn't ask, but later, I think. No, I definitely have plans for you later. Come on drinks at the theatre to be had Milady. I can't promise to keep my hands off you though." He stuttered and was lost for words. He looks pleased and I feel good. I'm also pleased that he likes the dress he's paid a lot of money for me to wear. "I can't get over the comments from the fans and public, but the ones on Thomas's page had me in tears, this big boy did cry and by the bucket too." He had his arm around my waist looking elegant in an evening suit, a crisp cotton dress shirt, with no bow tie he looked classy and yet casual.

The black studs catch my eye, I follow them northwards to his face and then south to, um yummy, his bulge! In the lift he pulled me into his tight grip and kissed me, his arms are holding me up, luckily for me as my legs buckled, he let me down gently and he pulled away as the door opened, he is smiling as I have to steady myself against the lift wall, before he took my feet from under me and my breath away.

"You look very nice too Ben." What a bloody cheesy thing to say, he looks nice? He looks stupidly too sexy for his own good, and right on cue I'm having another hot flush.

"I would hate to disappoint you Milady thanks for the complement. We're watching a musical, is that alright? It's Pricilla Queen of the Desert. Apparently, it's so funny you'll laugh so hard and your lashes will curl all by themselves. My sisters, they loved it when they were here last."

"Quoting again are you sure you're not gay? You know some fabulous quotes from chick flicks." He smiled turned me around and kissed me and oh boy did he kiss me. My arms are stunned into shock as they hung limply over his, which were busy holding My waist to keep me close to him, like I really wanted to pull away? He laughs as he opens my door. That kiss was amazing and needed, it felt so god damned nice, I took a deep calming breath, had I spoken I would have been definitely lounge tied and squeakily girlish. "You're definitely not gay! But look Ben, we need to talk. I've told you before that business and pleasure doesn't mix well. Nice as that kiss was, we could be heading towards disaster." I climb in the car Ben has ordered to take us just two blocks across and half a block up.

His smile is just too damn much. He doesn't say anything, he just smiles, like he didn't hear me or choose to hear me? With a deep sigh from me we get to the place, in silence I might add! His door is opened, and he comes around to open mine, helping me out, he slips one arm around my waist and the other under his jacket sort of all model like and sexy, and as he puts his hand in his pants pocket, I wonder what the hell he sees in me?

We were suddenly blinded again, as the sea of flashes from the cameras. Bloody hell. we were being photographed by the resident pond suckers again, who it seems are constantly on our heels. Ben just gives them a wave and leads me in, as he does, he whispers thank you for making him look good, who is he kidding it's definitely the other way around. At last he speaks.

"It looks like our business and pleasure do mix well, and we look good doing it too, just relax Milady, I have this covered and thank you for making me look good."

"You're getting very good, at keeping your hands to yourself Benjamin, and we still need to talk about us, I mean talk Ben, really talk." He smiled as he led us to the bar and ordered two dirty martinis.

"Mom calls me Benjamin too, usually when my dirty boots are not in the mud room, but on her freshly polished wooden floor. The hands is an easy fix baby, as we came in I had one in my pocket and one around my hot date, so I'd none free to throw any punches with, but I can't promise they're going to stop in there. In fact, I can quite honestly say they won't, I want to explore and play, do you fancy doing a little exploring? Do you want a look at what you're getting? What am I thinking, that's old news, I'm forgetting you've already seen the territory you're getting?" That sent a shiver down my spine and my body tingled in anticipation.

I'm getting to see that again, but when? I am going to take this damned easy and if I jump, I am not going in at the deep end, no, I am wading in from the shallow end and then perhaps, take a swim in the deep end, but only when I am totally ready. My head is pulling me in differing directions, my body another and myself will? What bloody self-will? 'Cos I am sure she has hitched a ride into the darned wilderness, that is no man's land, and in my case, that's true, because no man has ever tested my no-no-no resolve as much as Ben seems to be doing, even Garth, who is Garth again?

"We'll see! I'm still not sure about mixing this business and pleasure thing. I think it's yes to the revisit because I so like what I saw on my first visit too."

"I think, no I'm sorry, I know it's going to be very pleasurable mixing my business with your pleasure Milady, I can guarantee it. I could see the top of your stockings in the car too. I do approve of stockings on a lady. I'll be looking forward to taking Milady's off later." I know I was blushing as he leant in for another of his wow kisses. The lights flashed for the shows imminent start, and he led us to a private box where I felt like there was a thousand pairs of eyes on us as we sat down.

"These are wonderful seats, and Ben thank you, today has been amazing."

"And Penny it's not over yet, not by a long way." Now that sounded like Penelope Daniels is on a promise. I watched as a smile brakes out on his face, then he bit his bottom lip and let out a long deep sigh, sending a signal deep through my body straight to my sex, he's made me so damned hot and needy. Where is the old Penny when I needed her to be strong and resilient? This one is excessively lustful around Mr Lord.

The lights went down, and he pulled me closer. His lips touched mine with gentlest of kisses, his hand gently thumbing the top of my stockings, and lord I enjoyed his touches. They were as gentle as his kisses, he groaned, and he moved his hand, his kisses deepened, and he began to massage the top of my thigh, which felt amazing and made my sex throb. I'm surprised but not stopping him, he moved them to the warmth that had built up between my legs and he kissed the back of my neck and murmurs his thanks. I am swept along, as Ben began to play with me, is he testing me? Do I care?

He continues toying with me, and then exploring me, and all with his one finger, he pushed it into my now wet and wonton sex, he played between the folds, his finger is pushing and pulling, in and out it goes, and I allow it to continue, it feels so damned good, and I am thankful for the loud music and the heavily curtained box we were in. He begins kissing my mouth, I think he's trying to muffle the glorious sounds, the sounds coming from deep within me as I groaned outwardly in sheer pleasure.

He plays softly with me, as my legs tighten, I'm responding to each gentle touch. This was my first step into this sort of intimacy, nothing like this had happened with a man before ever. No man had ever made it past the top button of my blouse before and what a man to get intimate with. I had always wondered what this would be like, the sex without the sex. I want him to continue, not to stop, my breathing is laboured, because his kisses are making my head light and I feel like I'm about to scream yes, yes, yes, at the top of my lungs as my body spasms.

I feel funny, light headed, and in a trance, and as his fingers stretch me and play with me, he touches that spot and I cry out for him to drive his fingers deeper, the spot tingles and my mouth becomes dry. I feel a strange warmth between my legs, then suddenly I grab hold of his chest as I shake to an amazing and terrifying orgasmic crash, all as he continues with the kisses, he then moans seductively of his need in wanting to be in here fully, he pleads for it, I murmur yes, please yes tonight, Ben take me tonight. I don't think the words came out of my mouth though, as my brain has totally shut down.

I'm a little shocked, but not enough to stop him driving me totally out of my frigging mind, the pleasure he gives with the touch of his finger, has me wanting more and he isn't for stopping, I shiver at his touch and deepened the kisses. He'd turned me from meek and mild virgin kick arse manager to wonton sex starved harlot, with just one finger. I wanted to head back to the hotel right there and then, go all cave-girl and drag him to my bed. A second finger in and I'm whimpering, as his thumb gently strokes my clitoris. I'm moments away from screaming out his name, as he takes me higher and higher.

I know the words are rising to my mouth, and I tense as my body goes into something I've never experienced before, I had been near to this before, with my playthings, but always pulled back afraid it was too painful? Then as I came hard, he kisses away my screams of sheer pleasure, wow, his fingers are pleasing me like nothing I've ever felt before and then finally he slows it right down. I find my voice.

"Enough. Please. Stop Ben. I can't take this anymore." He carried on circling inside and stroking my now very sensitive spot. I whimpered and finally I feel as if I'm shattering into a million pieces in his hands.

"Good lord, Milady is so wet and oh so ready to play. Are you ready to play? I think we are going to have fun you and me. Just wait until we get back." I came again as he withdrew his fingers.

Oh heck yes. Sucking his fingers clean, he leans in and kisses me, and I taste myself on his tongue. Taking his handkerchief from his top pocket he gently begins wiping me, he puts it back in his trouser pocket and he smiles, and it's broad and filling his face, and as he looks into my eyes he kisses the tip of my nose. I'm left stunned at what we have just done and in front of a theatre full of people. I don't care, my inner harlot has just reapplied the red lipstick, and is doing a Sharon Stone, sat legs open and is fanning her man temptation bits.

"You will pay for that Benjamin, just wait and see. I can't believe you did that with all these people watching."

"If I thought for one minute we could be seen, and you were exposed, I wouldn't have done it, didn't you like it Penny?" He's trying to judge whether a smack to the face is coming his way or not.

"Yes, it was really nice and nice being an understatement, but why are you doing this Ben, why me? This is all so quick and so not like me at all." He leans in as the lights come up. After a gentle kiss, he smiles and gives me my answer.

"Because Penny we're both wound like coiled springs, and one of us had to make the first move. I saw you the watching me in the office on that first day, and I watched you too. The off-guard kisses and the accidental touches were sweet, but we need this Penny, and I Penny need you." Yes, I need him and right now.

He leads me to the bar for another dirty Martini. They are really, nice and so needed to calm my nerves. I hand him my drink and go to powder my nose. I take a minute to gather myself and collect my thoughts. Nope, it's no good my darned thoughts, they are everywhere. They're like butterflies, fluttering amongst the flowers in summer. Wild, carefree, dancing about, without a care in the world, I can't catch them and rein them in, because I don't want to, I feel liberated and as free as those imaginary butterflies escaping from their cocoons and embracing their freedom, I'm now feeling like a pretty butterfly.

As I walk back towards him he's watching me and looking like he's undressing me with his eyes, he looks so enigmatic stood against the bar and smiling, that devilish smile he has, what has he and that dirty mind got planned for later? I need to rustle a little of Bella into my game plan. Goody two shoes she isn't, Pious Penny needs putting to bed, literally, because times they are a changing and hopefully so am I.

"There's the curtain call Milady, finish your drink and we can catch the second half. Let's see if I can get you a little more worked up." Oh, not before I work him up first. He looks like a young James Bond and he's definitely got me both shaken and stirred.

"Lead the way Benjamin and I may be the one doing the working up though, two can play those games Lordie Lord." He raises his eyebrow, looking damn hot as he does.

"Oh, that sounds like a nice second half and I'm thinking I may like that a lot." I blush, and he sits down in his seat.

I'm sitting so close to him, that I can see the pulse in his neck throbbing, I kiss that beating pulse and he sighs. The lights go down again, and the music is playing. Leaning into his chest, my hand wanders. I'm still kissing the gentle throb on his neck and he groans. I feel him, he was from what I saw that morning, blessed in the man department. Here though, he's just two inches away from my hand, which is unzipping his fly, he smiles whilst biting his bottom lip. He pulls me closer into him. My hand finds him and he's thick and long, and as he sits, he's smiling and still biting his damn lip. I wonder if this is the right thing to do? Can the audience see us making out? We look as though we are cuddling, hell we're not though. Stop panicking, Lordie is the right nickname for him, with what I've got in my hot sweaty hand, its lordie-lordie huge.

"Going commando under Armani, is very rude Benjamin, I think I'll have to find a way of punishing you for that."

I find the button and unfasten him, and he springs free, the whole of him and up close there is a hell of a lot of him. I take him in my hand and slowly work his length as he leans into me and closes his eyes. Harder, tighter, quicker, slower and when the music hits a loud section he groans, my hand is pleasuring him to the music I'm conducting a symphony to the sounds of an Abba song, I will never listen to 'Knowing Me Knowing You,' ever again, without thinking of this moment because I think I like knowing this part of his body and I know he likes it too! Never will I think of this Abba song again, without a smile on my face. What a dream, because yes, I say thank you for the damn music, and smile as he falls to pieces beneath my hand.

The audience is singing along, the music is thankfully so loud, it masks his pleasure. He definitely likes this and with his eyes shut, he growls in my ear for me to finish him. The music is hiding his sounds as he begins to climax in my hand, I not sure what to do? Do I now do what I saw my ex-friend doing, she was as I remember, quite the oral performer? I had witnessed many such concerts over those three years at university, I would say in the confines of our flat, but she was an open-air performer too: trains, boats, busses, taxis and clubs!

They were though her know speciality and she often dropped her purse. I in fact, first actually witnessed this the first time, as I sat next to her in a cab, as she did it to a lad she'd picked up waiting at the taxi rank, so I watched, and he liked it, especially the me watching him thing, as she bobbed up and down on him? They both liked that a lot the two of them, watching me, as I watched her, as she took him to the edge of sanity. Well, he wasn't making any sense with the words he used. He was as if a man processed, as though he was trying to exorcize the demon from within, then she swallowed the whole mess he produced as he'd requested. She, I thought she had killed him as he collapsed on the taxi floor. He spent two nights in our small flat, where she tried to get me to join in. I didn't like him at all and so I stopped with Suzie that weekend.

She too was no better, her boyfriend was a Japanese exchange student and boy what an energetic performer he was, for such a small lad. They, between the two of them taught me quite a lot. So, I leant down and finished him off with my mouth, sucking him gently. Bella did this with vigour, but for the first time I take him and it slowly and gently, he's coming and his hands in my hair holding my head still as he groaned into his arm, as he slowly came, and boy did he come. I smiled sweetly as he passed me the handkerchief from earlier.

"Milady, I do believe that was so not what I was expecting from you tonight, that was so pleasing and nice." He kissed me and fastened himself back up. Eyeing the crowd, I smiled as people were enjoying the Abba songs. Some are getting up and dancing, and most are singing along. The curtain call was our call to go to dinner. He smiled as he kissed the back of my hand. "What a skilled tool you have here, my fella enjoyed being at their mercy, then being finished off so skilfully, with these two fine lips." A kiss and his arm snaked around my waist.

"I believe these were quite playful too, this is a damn expensive place for sexual gratification and in a public place Ben and I'm sorry, but I have to ask, do you do that with all your dates?" He laughs.

"Our car awaits Penny, and no I've never done that, had sex in public before. You're shaking Baby. Did you not bring a coat?"

"No sorry, I'm in shock at what we have just done, and at my actions, because I, I really haven't done this before." He removed his jacket and slipped it over my shoulders kissing my neck.

"Really, and you're so good at it too? I know I liked what we did, please, you shouldn't have any regrets Penny because this feels so right, don't be sorry it was amazing." I feel his arm around my waist, and he pulls me closer, nuzzling at my neck as I murmur my thanks at the gentle kisses.

"Where are we eating Ben?" He was grinning as he opened my door kissing me, as he did, there are flashes and he still didn't retaliate. The driver opened the door for him, and he climbed in by my side. We pulled up outside an old coach house, 'One If by Land Two If by Sea.' What a beautiful name, for a beautiful restaurant, it sounded more elegant than surf and turf, and yes, I know it's named after Paul Revere's code for the British are coming, and with any luck she will be doing soon. What was the number of lanterns that were lit to warn Ben that I was coming? Three I think, because I came for him by plane, not land or sea...

I am with my poetical fairies, my heads light and my soul sings, the devil on my shoulder is egging me on and the angel? She was wacked by the fairies and poked by the devil into staying quiet. The white arches led us into the nicest restaurant I've been in, in quite a while. My word, it deserved the beautiful name too. An olde-worlde restaurant, quite a charming building, with plenty to look at, complete with its impressive chandeliers and panelling, this was so romantic. We are ushered to our table and Ben just keeps smiling as he pulls out my chair and flops into his, it seems he liked the show.

"Do you bring all your dates here?"

"If, by dates you mean those I'm photographed with," I nod, "then no, I bring Mom and the girls here. They adore the place, so I thought I would bring you here too." My heart is feeling like it's exploding from my chest, and my pulse rate is racing at high speed, as he was strummed his thumb over my knuckles.

"I've ordered already, I hope you're not allergic to fish, or are you?" I smiled at his concern.

"No, I've no allergies, I'm an all you can eat, and eat whatever your given, sort of a girl." I rather smiled at that though, given what I'd done for the first time and not even an hour ago. I sipped on the third dirty Martini of the night. "What have you got going through that mind of yours Mr Lord, you've been really quiet, did I not do something, do something that I shouldn't have, what?" He laughed so loudly the people in the room stared at him.

"You Penny have blown me away, and not just tonight, but ever since I walked into that room and stared at those legs, you didn't know it, but you were driving my party package to distraction. Then when you got up and gave me that talking to, I thought you were so, so sexy and then there's a head rush I get, when you handle things, sort things. He starts being bad again, when we were on the rug in the park this afternoon, I wanted you, really wanted you Penny.

Tonight though, looking like a million bucks and the pleasing shock you gave me back there in the theatre, I'm thinking we're going to be pretty awesome bed buddies and tonight too. I'm just left wondering whose bed, mine or yours?" I don't think about it, thinking too much and then I worry too much, and then put it off and end up not doing it at all, which has been my problem in the past, over thinking things. Go with the moment Penny live for once.

"Yours, I think, no definitely yours Ben." I'm in need of a stern talking to, my boss is going to kill me when she finds out I'm sleeping with a client. Oh hell. I love being self-employed. Consider myself warned.

"Mom asked if we will be stopping at home, when we go back. She misses having the house full. Will you be alright? I've a condo on the waterfront too, it's just..."

"...You need to spend time with your mother? That's fine, but she won't want a stranger in her house though surely?" He kisses my hand the tingles are rife and joining the growing sensations riding throughout my body. Plates cleared. Check please.

"You won't be a damn stranger in an hour." I just smiled, and my stomach is churning, I start to wonder, and wander. I need to focus. The starter was excellent and very well cooked, Maine scallops, and I've not tasted anything as nice in quite a while. My head is spinning and thinking about the food before me isn't helping at all, because watching him eat is sending my sex into overdrive too. Sipping the water, he reaches over and takes my hand. The waiter places the lobster in front of me and I wait for the waiter to go.

"Are you sure you want to do that with me? I mean, I don't want to ruin what could be a good working partnership, for both of us. Ruining it by having sex, and I'm not that type of girl believe it or not." He finished his meal, there really wasn't a lot on his plate. I think he is more of a steak and potatoes type of guy. In bringing me here, he's showing me he can be romantic, no man eats this food type of food because he has too, unless it's to please your mother, but then again, I am not his mother...

"I, contrary to the press, don't bed hop either. I did when I first got here and had a few risky dates, and I did some stupid things when I was drinking, but nothing since and I don't end the night in anybody's bed other than mine and then that is always alone and by choice, the exception to that rule and the only one I would consider allowing into my bed, is you Penny and not just my bed, but into my world as a whole, I want you to be a big part of it." Why do I not believe him?

The women in here haven't taken their eyes of him all night, why plain old me? Sipping his water and finishing his meal, he orders another dirty Martini and as he continues with his sipping at the water in the glass. I stare at him, even kissing the glass with his full lips is driving me to the edge. "We can take it as easy as you like Penny, and just enjoy ourselves, and just fool around if that's all you want? I want to take you, be inside you and hear you scream for me to stop, it was such a turn on hearing you beg Penny, so can we go right now and do just that?" No, oh no, definitely a no, I have to stop and take things easy.

He ran his fingers over my thighs, and I love these feelings. He leans in and gives me a lush, warm kiss. The waiter brings us dessert, a carrot cake and oh my, if Ben playing with my thigh wasn't already hitting the spot, well this cake certainly did, both had me doing that When Harry met Sally moment, when the first spoonful hit my mouth, oh yes, yes, yes, oh, God yes. It really is orgasmic, and Lord, I want more, of both the cake and of Ben. Yes, yes, yes, yes, oh hell yes.

"Yes Ben, I want more, and after all this romancing and your damn naughty fingers, we should have skipped dessert and had it back at the hotel."

"Now you say, damn woman, I could have gone straight to the hotel after the show." He signalled for the bill and I finished my drink and the last piece of orgasmic heaven on my fork, yes, yes, yes, oh yes.

Chapter 8:

The ride back to the hotel lasted ten long minutes. We could have walked quicker. Hell, as worked up as we both were, we could have done it five. He helped me out of the car and began kissing my hand, as I offered it up for stability, because I'm suddenly weak at the knees. We almost ran for the lift and as he pulled me into his arms in the lift, whilst pressing button to his floor, his tongue began darting in and out of my mouth, my tongue fighting with his each trying to dominate the other, he groaned, the noises we were making sounded more like big fat sloppy kisses, his kisses began turning into a feeding frenzy.

"I. Am. Glad. I. Sent. You. That. Ticket. Now. Penelope. Daniels." He kisses me between each word, he pulled away from my lips and he left me breathless.

"I'm glad I was drunk and not the usual me at all, thank you Suzie Q, she talked me into getting on the plane, you know as a bet? Are you sure, you want to do this? There's no turning back once we do this."

"Damn sure, stop talking like you don't want this, we take this one day at a time Penny. Now get that mighty fine arse in my bedroom and now." Oh hell, oh God Lord help me.

"How does this work then?" He laughs at my question, but how am supposed to know? He doesn't know that though. I would wake to Bella already naked, coming through the bedroom door, having stripped in the lounge or down the communal hallway, it was all dependant on the amount of champagne consumed, how loud she was doing it, I would wake up when Bella was nearly always undressed, now I wish that my voyeuristic adventures were, in fact more closely observed. Now I needed the help.

"Pretty well normally, but around you he's enthused a lot, come here." He has already taken his jacket off and cuff links from his shirt, before he pulls me into his arms and gives me the nicest of kisses, his hands go to the zip on my dress. He kisses my shoulders as the dress drops to the floor, he gasps as he sees the underwear and wow I do look like a harlot. Seeing my fantastically sexy lace and silk ensemble, I bet he thinks he's hit pay dirt. Oh hell, great thinking Penny. My hands start taking off his shirt, each black button stud, is reviling more of his fantastic physique, he kisses my neck and then my shoulder again. "Penny you really are damn fine, what a beautiful woman you are, but you're wearing too many clothes still, let me rectify that situation."

"As are you, let me help you out of these things, you seem to be struggling to undress, Mr Lord?" I smile as he undoes my bra, sighing as my breasts are at last free from all their protective layering of silk and lace, his pants slip easily down his legs and he kicks them to the chair. "Lordie, Mr Lord, you're happy to see me." His eyebrow playfully rises.

"Not as excited as he's going to be soon, especially when he's in here." His fingers are searching out their well-practised route from in the theatre, my gasp of delight turned into a moan of deep satisfaction as his fingers hit that spot. Oh lord, he has the right name and I think I've died and hell, gone to heaven. He collapses to his knees and begins to take down the stockings. "Baby you have the nicest legs, they feel so smooth when wrapped so nicely in silk. You look like a birthday present waiting to be unwrapped. You feel good beneath my hands Penny, really good. Please be mine Baby, just mine, no one else gets to unwrap you Penny, just me, just me Baby." He has removed all my clothes and I stand naked before him, he's knelt at my feet, where he looks like he's worshipping me.

I feel like a goddess as he begins pleasuring me with his kisses, he nips and kisses my belly, my head is light, help me please how will I survive the night? He's so good at what he does. I hold on tightly to his copper locks, as they are the only thing keeping me balanced. My head gets a fuzzy feeling rushing around in it, and as his kisses search out a pathway to my sex. I panic, but I find much to my relief this is amazing and so nice, and as I stare at what he is doing, I moan aloud for more, all as his tongue continues to kiss parts of me that no man has ever seen before.

I feel no sense of embarrassment, as I thought I would, nothing like that actually, just a lust filled needing and I like it. The feelings have me moaning his name, begging him to take all of me, he holds me tighter and as his tongue slides across my clitoris. I shudder, and I sway, I'm finding it increasingly hard to concentrate. Stopping upright is going to be an impossible thing to do if he keeps doing that, I will fall. My energy feels as though he's drawing it from me; I'm so tired, with every sweep of his tongue, over the sensitive bud he takes more from me.

It throbs and as his tongue plays with it: teasing it, toying with it to give me release, it sends a stream of tiny shivers, fantastic tiny message's to differing parts of my body. I feel hot, then cold, and a burst of energy sweeps throughout my body, and suddenly as he laps at it with his tongue, I can't stand any longer and my legs start to buckle under me, such is the pleasure he's giving me. He senses I can no longer stand and grips my legs, just in time as I collapse onto him as he brings me to a magical climax. I look into his eyes as I end up sprawled, rather precariously all over him and he laughs, as we end up in a heap on his bedroom floor.

"Only you Ben, only you, if that is what you want, then yes only you." He smiles and lays kisses across my breast, and then he's sucking fiercely on my nipple. It responds by standing hard and feels wonderful, his fingers then invade my sex again, yet another set of chills racing throughout my body. As I'm lain under him on his bedroom floor, his tongue trails downwards and he invades my sex again as he holds me to him, my legs flop open to allow him more access, and as I fist his hair in my hands, I shiver to a fantastically weird climax? Why? Because I can't stop crying, it's a pleasurable pain, it hurts, but it doesn't hurt? I feel, and I am confused, exhilarated, exhausted too, I'm a wreck, and yet he looks as fresh as a daisy.

He looks up with those killer dark blue, almost black eyes, deep and gorgeous staring into mine and I melt. He stands and I finally free him of his shirt as he picks me up and carries me to his bed. He lies me down in the centre and he joins me on the bed and he kisses the spot just behind my ear, it's pulses shooting warning shots to each part of my body, telling them look out, he's coming your way. I can't stand the feelings any longer, his fingers find their favourite place, and he's kissing my breasts then the combination of everything has all my senses fighting. My feet are fighting too, as they grapple with the duvet. I beg him to stop, this time it's fiercer a more painful orgasm, it doesn't want to stop, I beg him to stop it and as I do, I scream...

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, oh hell yes." as I come down from the most unusual pain, which is both pleasurable and painful, I think for the briefest moment I stop breathing. I see stars, oh hell I see the moon and stars combined, have I died and gone to heaven?

"Milady doth protest too much, do you want me to do this?" He sticks his fingers in again, and again. He bites my lip, playfully letting it fall, then kisses me again. "Penny I need you, really need to be in here, I need you now, and oh darling you're definitely ready for me."

His fingers are stretching and playing with me. He rips one of the condoms open he has in his bedside drawer throwing the others on the top, I'm to be treated to this more than once? Yes please. I watch nervously as he and rolls it down his impressive length, it's definitely ready to play. I watch, though panicking inside, I'm smiling outside. I watch, I wait, this moment is full of dread, and yet at the same time the needing and wanting I feel, to have him be the one, those feelings are coming from deep within my conscience. I try to tell him, I want to tell him, but he will stop, but I want him too much. I want him, my lips move to tell him, but instead all that comes out is a whisper.

"Please, be gentle with me." He kisses me and is between my legs. I really should say something. No, it will be fine, besides I want him. I've found my one, my favourite nun said I would know was the right one. I relax, as his kisses are soft and gentle on my lips, he talks softly.

"I'll always do what you want Penny, always." He enters me gently. I call his name repeatedly, crying as I do. He takes my head in his hands I shake beneath him. He slowly works himself gently inside me. The feelings are like nothing I've ever felt before, painful and hot, wonderful yet cold, tingly painful, definitely painful and all my senses are dazed and confused. He asks me to relax, I cry and bury my face into his chest and hold him tightly. "Penny are you alright Baby? What's the matter am I hurting you?" He stops and holds me. He kisses me gently and moves the hair from my face he looks in my eyes. "Shit, I'm hurting you. I'm stopping Baby. Shush, Penny I'm stopping, your hurting."

"No, don't stop, please Ben, don't stop, please your first time is always painful I was told."

"What Penny, oh hell Baby, what the fuck? You choose now to tell me that important piece of information. I'm Baby, oh, hell you should have said something, no wonder it's hurting. I'm too big for your first time, like we did it. You really should have said, we would have taken it a hell of a lot easier, oh hell Baby, why did you not say something? Do you want me to stop?" He's so contrite and the remorse is awful to see in his face, he will hate me for this later.

"If you stop now, I'll not be in the mood to party with that party package you're so fond of showing me. Now slow and easy and thank you, it's fine and you're more than fine, party on dude." He really needs to rename his party package. I smile as he touches me again, and I relax.

"Yes Ma'am, I live to serve you and thank you for you know... For letting, me be your first. I hope I've not disappointed you Penny?" As if... I feel so loved by this man, I'm on the receiving end of the best kiss ever. He kissed me again and as our tongues danced, I'm feeling loved and he's taking it slowly and I'm relaxing into him. I'm able to take more of him, he looks down at me and I lift my heels and draw my knees up, relaxing more and grabbing at his back, then oh my word, the feelings get pleasurable, yet really weird and nice and oh hell, wonderful.

"Oh God, yes, you're there, Ben thank you, thank you. I think I may have just died again." I shake, I hurt, I'm hot and I'm wet, I'm feeling wonderful, I'm exhausted.

My climax is wonderful, I feel happy and sore, yet he still has more energy than the energiser bunny. The long slow rhythmical movements are bliss and the sheer build-up of feelings, it's like an amazing fireworks display is going off, and he's doing the lighting of all the touch papers. The tender words he whispers in my ears are lyrical, romantic and expressive, he wants more he wants all of me. He has all of me, more than any other soul has ever had, he has it here in his hot sweaty palms, the same ones that are holding my arms above my head, as he kisses my nipples, and my cries call out his name, my body sensitive and aware of all these mixed feelings, each one is new and exciting, yes, I surrender to him again.

"I feel you all of you. You feel so good thank you, oh hell. I'm there, Ben just you only you. Wow, Benjamin Lord, you so get the naughty name, it needs its own roll of honour. All tests passed with flying colours, and so worth the wait."

"Hold that though, Baby, fuck yes, I'm giving this to you again, damn right just you." He thrust hard into me leaving me breathless and I'm desperately wanting him to need me again, he groans as he finishes. As I lay languid under him, I'm happy, though he has drained me of all my energy. In my euphoric dream state, I feel complete. "That was really great hell, but hell Penny you really should have told me, Baby would and should have done more of the other stuff. You're what twenty-four and a virgin, why God when you're so beautiful and weren't you engaged? Hell's teeth, another surprise Penny and thank you for allowing me to be your first. I'll go and draw you a bath, and you Baby, just lay and relax you must be hurting?" He got up taking the condom off knotting it and dumping it in the bin.

I watch as he walks off, his buttocks are tight, and his dick is massive and hanging flaccid by his leg. Oh lord I did it, I lost it, and to an absolute hunk of a man, and as I hug my legs tightly. I think about what I've done. Yes, I did that, and with him. He returned grinning, picking me up like a wounded soldier, I nestle into his chest, and after a head kiss, he is placing me in the soapy bubble filled bath with such care and attention and I ache and yes that part of me is sore and stinging.

"I was twenty-four and a virgin, but not anymore! Ben thank you for being gentle. I was engaged yes, but because I told him I wanted to wait until we married, because I'd made a solemn vow of chastity until marriage, well I can't do that now can I, because I always swore it would be with the man on the night I married him. Though this well, sort of changes things a little now, and do you, do you still want to do this again? No, I didn't mean that like it sounded that you have to marry me, shit I mean..." I am embarrassed and waffling like an idiot.

"...Hell yes, and more so now, I want you all the time, just you, only you and any way you want it Baby. I live to please you."

"Really, I thought I was awful at it, didn't it bother you me being a virgin? You were wonderful, and when can we do that again?" More waffling from me to cover my awkwardness.

"Move down, I'll get in too, if that's okay?" He threw his robe on the floor and Ben joined me in the hot soapy bubbles. "You weren't awful, quite the reverse it was pretty fantastic. It's better than anything I've ever done before, it was great, and you really are just mine. Please Penny, don't worry about anything. I promise you, it was more than fine, it's really just what Lordie ordered, a new life and a new start with his hot, really hot girlfriend, who gave me her most prized possession and for that I am truly thankful."

After placing coconut bath oil on the oversized sea sponge, he began to wash me, gently placing a kiss on my neck and his chin on my shoulder. He began whispering what he was doing, and what he wanted to do all night with me. The touches and the soothing water eased my pain away but were filling my head with the thoughts and need for more. He climbed out of the tub, pulling on his robe and grabbing another robe, he wrapped me in it carrying me to his bed. I was now his girlfriend. Hell yes.

"Now sleep and feel free to wake me, when you want another amazing time, without shocking the hell out of your boyfriend this time Baby?" He winked, he said that aloud, boyfriend and he really wants me as a girlfriend? He throws the duvet over me and wraps me in his arms. I wake in the night and Ben still has his arms wrapped around me. I'm going to burn in the pits of hell for what I did last night; but looking at him, lying beside me, my inner harlot smiles and asks if anyone wants a side order of charcoaled Penelope? He stirs, I kiss his nose and he murmurs under his breath. Kissing him again he wakes, smiling.

"You're an eager little thing, I like having you in my bed, please stay in it?"

"I can stop in here until breakfast and then I, we I mean really have to change, we both have a lot to do today." He pulls me on top of him.

"Are you good to go? That's not very romantic, but I'll try not to hurt you this time?" I kiss him opening his mouth with my tongue and kissing him roughly. He responds move for move, his hands reach into my hair, and he pulls me closer, rolling over he is on top of me, so close I can feel him nearing me, he is distracting me with his slow and gentle kisses. I could do just this all day long and he knows it, he's driving me out of my mind and as he looks into my eyes and winks.

"Was that painless, enough for you Milady? You really just needed to relax and never do anything like that again, you really are so amazing."

"I really was just too embarrassed to tell you that I was a virgin, sorry I won't do anything like that again I promise. That promise though is now pointless, I can't lose it for the first time twice, thank God."

"Shush, I'm going to make love to you slowly, lovingly, gently and for the rest of the night." He was already buried deep inside me as he smiled down at me. He moved smoothly as he promised. I started to shake under him again and I'm about to surrender to him again. "You feel so good Penny, we are going to be so perfect, but that's only if you want to be with me and me alone and it's not just casual sex? I get kind of territorial when people come near you Penny: mad crazy, jealous kind of mad, when Dan kissed you, I wanted to rip his head off his shoulders."

Was he actually asking me to be in a serious relationship with him? Then all that flies out of the window, as those feeling start to multiply in the deep and usually hidden parts of my body that was, until tonight, like a bank vault. My virtue was safe and secured by a thick impenetrable set of iron doors, called resolve and no! Now it seems I may have met someone who has blown the bloody doors off, because I feel it building and try to calm down and savour these fantastic feelings taking over my body, but I am losing out to my mouth, which seems to have a bad case of tourettes at the moment.

"Oh fuck, oh shit, oh no, sweet mother of God, no, you're good. Ben yes, yes, yes, just we two, fuck in hell yes. Get me all weak at the knees and then floor me with the questions. You're catching me at the moment of weakness, being as you have me wrapped around your little finger now, and hooked on your party package?" I place my legs around him, I feel the need to be as close to him, as I can possibly get, and as he moves, he begins slowly rocking inwards and outwards caressing me, he locks his arms around me and we roll over. I'm suddenly on top of him looking down into his eyes. He has his hands on my thighs as he watches me looking down into his eyes.

"You take charge Lady Penelope. Milady only has to ask if you need your Parker to help." Hell, I may not have had sex, but I've seen Bella the dominatrix, have sex enough. We shared the one bedroom student flat. I spent a lot of time wearing earplugs and blindfolds when she had company. I spent my university nights, all three bloody years, cringing and listening to her drunken, drag them home booty calls. I'm now knelt over him my knees are to each side of his chest. I lower myself onto his shaft, I am on him and his dick feels so good, and as I begin my assault upon the invader within, I smile, yes, I can do this. I begin rising and falling on him, his hands are on my hips, gripping tightly as I lean down, still thrusting I begin to suckle upon his nipples, they are hard, I expect from his sexual arousal? I know mine react to his touches. I bite gently the first few times, and as I get closer, he drives me mad and I get rougher.

"Milady learns well, keep doing that, oh hell yes." I thrust on him harder and as he kisses me again he fills me and begins shuddering to his own climax, I suddenly tense and shake, he's holding me in place until my orgasm finishes. His huge dick fills me, and has managed yet again, to turn me into a quivering wreck. "Shit. Penny we never use a condom, hell we were, I mean, I was, we were so caught up, hell I'm so sorry." I'm shocked and confused.

"I'm the one who should be taking precautions too, I didn't expect to come here and fall in love." I can't stop myself damn I said it.

"You love me Penny? I mean that wasn't what I expected you to say, not yet any way. I was about to say, before I put my size elevens in it, I think I've fallen head over heels for you too. I just couldn't imagine you were feeling it too. We still have to sort out the little problem of our over enthused bare-back-ride. I want a baby with you, but not just yet." I can't believe he said he loved me, or that he wants me to have his children. My mind is swiftly brought back to earth with my problem, sorry our problem, thank frig for modern medicine and the morning after, the wonderful night before pill...

"I'll go to see a doctor, and ask about the morning after pill, and get it sorted, it's a simple thing to do. Ben it's an easy fix and whilst I'm there I'll sort out birth control, seeing as I, sorry we now need it. More sex with you is so on my list of things to do and I hope daily? Can I have some more, like now please?" He sits up and kisses me and the hug is so needed, the after-effects of him and sex leave me blushing, in a happy post-coital state of sheer bliss. I think though the near miss has made him rethink this, I do hope not.

"I need to hit the gym, Penny. I'll order breakfast do you want a shower, or will you wait until I get back and we can take one together? Then we can run through the busy day we have planned." Oh yes, and I thank God that I get more sex with him, he smiles at me, as if he's thinking the same thing. I get up and use the bathroom whilst he changes into his workout clothes. I come back and see the mess that was my virginity on the sheets. I strip the bed and Ben looks amused. "Room service Penny, they will do it leave it. I may keep it as a souvenir and add it to my trophy cabinet, the best one received to date. Thank you and what a trophy Milady, thank you again." I blush and strip the bed.

"I think Lordie Lord is pushing his luck now, I can't have the whole bloody hotel thinking you murdered somebody in your room, especially knowing that this was down to me."

"What? You're embarrassed about being with me Baby?" He looks hurt, is he a moron? I feel like the luckiest woman in New York City.

"God no, really is just the whole first-time thing, I don't care who knows we are together, tell the whole world for me, in fact I insist you do, then the other women will know that you're all mine. I'm very possessive of my things too. I'm so lucky to have you, I love you, you idiot." He sweeps me into his arms for an almighty kiss.

"I feel the same way, if you're feeling like a stupid lovesick teenager too, then we have it bad Baby? I think Milady has me hooked around her tiny British fingers?" He places me gently in the chair, kisses me and smiles.

I blush and hug my legs, yes that sums my feelings right up. Love sick, and feeling stupidly goofy. Ben orders a breakfast of pancakes and bacon for me, plus coffee and toast English Breakfast Muffins, with butter and jam. He orders the same smiling as he leaves to work out. I needed to do a quick dash downstairs and grab my clothes. I need to check my emails and things too. I take the room key and run down and grab the lift, the boy smiles at me in my fluffy Plaza robe. I get the things I need for the day including my briefcase and handbag. Heading back up to his room my mood dampens considerably, I arrive to find a woman knocking on the door, shouting profanities, looking flustered, angry and asking for Ben, she's telling him to open the goddamn door. I hear her say shit under her breath as she sees me.

"I think you will find Mr Lord is in the gym, who are you?" I open the door and let myself in, as I do, she barges past me and throws herself on the couch. "Make yourself at home, why don't you? Again, can I help you? I didn't ask you to come in, and I'm sure Ben won't like it either."

"He had no complaints back in November and now I've every right to be here, as the mother of his child." My world stops still for what seems an eternity. What did she just say? I take the quickest of showers and change. As I go back to face his pregnant girlfriend, she's weeping into her hands.

"Have you done a pregnancy test?" I am so sad, but am I mad or am I disappointed too, fuck knows, but I want answers that's for sure?

"I don't need to I'm regular as clockwork and I'm late, by a couple of weeks. Who are you?" The door opens, and Ben looks at her. He does know her, damn it.

"Miss Walsh, Angela. What can I do for you?" He looks puzzled as she starts crying again.

"She says Ben, that she's having your child." He laughs, really laughs as he smiles at me.

"My baby, I think not? To be having my child, she would have needed firstly to have had sex with me and secondly, I would have had to be drunker than a frat boy who had been drinking for a straight week to go near her, because Angela you are still just a child." She blushes, and I see the look, and then she panics, this is a con but why, is she trying to get money from him?

"Ben now stop this, get changed and we will go and see the doctor together." I wink at him. He catches it and shuts up. "When did you have sex with him, then we can work out a date to tell the doctor, so around when did you conceive Ben's child then?" I grab a pen and paper and she tell's me the week Ben asked for her transferred, because he had used her and didn't want her anymore, not once they had done 'it' he then had her moved. That was the first week in November, according to the paperwork and even I can work out she's well overdue, overdue for a bloody good slapping, which I'll be dishing out soon, if the truth doesn't spill out of her mouth.

"He was drunk when he came home, and he willingly slept with me." Ben showers and changes then comes in looking hot. She couldn't look at him, whilst I can't take my eyes off him. Ben was last drunk in October, all the other times he was acting up for the cameras and I have seen the blood test results, so Miss what's your game? Are you already pregnant and blaming Ben or claiming your fifteen minutes of fame? I look at Ben who looks shocked and troubled.

"Well, I've got to visit the doctors today, so we will ask for you to be seen too, they can do all the tests today, they can do a pregnancy test and then, I'm so sorry Miss Walsh, but Ben will need a DNA test done and today too. It's a little painful however, but one they have to do. I'm so sorry, it means inserting a needle into your stomach, they need to pierce through the wall of your womb, to take a sample of the baby's DNA, the procedure is painful, but one we need to have done. As Ben has serious health issues, he has 'una grande testa e piedi per abbinare.' Have you ever heard of it, but I warn you, it can be extremely painful? I'm so sorry, but these genes will pass to the child. Well you wouldn't want to have a problem like that with your child. Unless you think you can handle a child with that problem?" Nothing like a child who has his daddy's big head and massive feet too? "Here let me show you a video of the whole thing and show you the condition your child will be born with." I fire up the laptop and she squeal's, then she breaks down in a sea of tears. Daddy always taught me you have to be good to kid a kidder. He was good at his job and knew how to play out 'what if' scenes. He had to do it all the time in his job, he was a top diplomat with the government, before something happened, and the calling took him and Mother to their dark Godly place.

"I didn't want to come here, they told me I had to and make it convincing, I'd to tell you that I was pregnant, but through the door and whilst you were at the gym, so I was shouting at the empty room, but making sure other guests and staff heard me. Then I had to leave, but she was here, and she asked too many questions. I didn't want to do it Ben, but Howarth's a mean and ugly man, he is evil, and you know it, he's made threats to have me killed and I knew things I wasn't supposed to, especially the things they did when you were drinking, the things they got you to sign, and I witnessed.

I was warned I was easily replaced. I overheard things I don't think I was supposed to hear, when he went to the toilet I would take a few papers from his case and put them in the office drawers, he 'lost' his memory stick too, that's in the desk. I needed something to hold over them, should they try anything. Still, I don't think what I found is going to help me. Can you help me? Hart and Howarth have a couple of cop friends on their payroll too, so I couldn't go to them. I really am frightened."

She's sobbing and apologetic, so much so I feel sorry for her, having been on the end of a Howarth backlash, he was rather scary, and I can handle large drunken idiots and could possibly stick up for myself with Howarth, her I didn't think she could do anything, but do as she was instructed. "They're leaking it to the press now, that you have impregnated an employee and aren't taking your responsibilities seriously. I never slept with him at all, the time I was here, all he had me do for him was run errands, bring his laundry, and pick up after him. He's a lazy arse, Momma's Boy.

They threatened to sack me, and this job is all I have. They could only use me because all the other people seen with him from the company are male and here, they know me as his assistant. I'm screwed now, Howarth is going to make me pay. I didn't know you would be here, he never brings women back, I always thought he was gay to be honest, have you seen his DVD collection?" I laugh, as Ben is taken-aback because she thought he was gay, not for the fact that he was going and is still likely to be crucified for this next story? I then make several phone calls. I spend time getting her a plane ticket and twenty minutes later, I've printed out a ticket and instructions. She may only need to be there a week depending on what the accountants and the lawyers find. I'll have to tell Mr De Witt about Howarth having police on the payroll.

"You're going to stop in England for a while, your plane leaves JFK at two this afternoon. A car is picking you up, with security that will be staying with you until you board the plane, they will come with you to collect your things, so pack for winter as its freezing cold there, my wardrobe is yours to use, apart from my shoes. My friend Suzie will meet you at Heathrow, as you will stop at hers for the time being and when I get back next week, I'll sort somewhere more permanent, if you need to be there that long. They are playing desperate now, and you're the key to them bringing Ben down, and they may not even stop at just firing you for the double cross?" The phone rings. "Your lift is here, here take my Am-Ex card, the number is 4535, leave all your own cards and your phone behind, and please don't use that card until you get to England." Ben passes her more money for the airport, as security knock on the door for her, she looks so afraid, and I know she's been sick once, but this way she's out of his way and safe.

"Angela please tell nobody you're leaving, tell your roommate if you have one, that you're going back home for a holiday, when you get to England phone your parents, and tell them you have been transferred, tell them Paris, Rome wherever, but not England. I cannot stress enough Angela you're in grave danger, so talk to nobody and remember you're not alone, security will not leave you I promise, and the house you're stopping at nobody knows I own." I saw the look on Howarth's face in the office Monday, and I was afraid. She leaves thanking me and she gives Ben a hug, with an utter of a tearful apology.

Chapter 9:

Ben kisses me as the phone rings, there is another knock on the door as breakfast is here, I don't feel like eating but we may not be able to eat until much later in the day.

"It's for you Penny, I'll sort out the breakfast, it's Danny." I take the call, and he kisses me, as he passes, and sees to breakfast

"Hi Danny, where is the email and why have you not been in touch?"

"I had a few problems to handle. What have you managed without it?"

"Suzie has taken you on as her client, because I'm going to be here a little longer than I planned on originally. I have however pulled strings and Blackpool are willing to look at opening talks, there's not been a lot of offers for a footballer who sleeps with his teammate's girlfriends and wives."

"I swear I will change, I have changed Penny, thanks. Was it hard to get me a spot?"

"Yes. Your reputation precedes you Danny, and my reputation is on the line too. I have pulled several strings to get you this meeting, but don't go if it's not what you want, and don't mess Suzie around or you will have me to deal with, am I clear?"

"I can't go home yet! Can you get me a hotel too?"

"There is no need. You can stop with Suzie for the time being, but no funny business, she will kick your arse. Dan, please don't mess her around or I'll kick your arse too. She's expecting your call, her numbers the same and Danny good luck, this is your last chance."

"I need to grab a car rental then, I am not sure how to do it, you dealt with all that stuff for me before Penny?"

"Suzie is meeting you at the airport, and she has my car keys, you can use her and treat her kindly, the car not Suzie, but be warned, crash my baby Lexi and you die. Good luck Danny, this really is your last chance saloon, don't let me down." He thanks me, and I see Ben is still grinning and is looking over at me, as I hang up.

"You have a name for your car?"

"I do indeed, she's my best girl, she's my ruby red racing rocket, my Lexi. She's a Lexus Convertible and I'm definitely missing my baby." He laughs at me again, kisses me and sits down to eat. I can't do anything but blush as he smiles at me from the table. I sit opposite him and eat my breakfast.

"This looks lovely, eat we may not get any downtime today. I've loads to do and there's going to be a mass of questions about your love child... Ben, quickly turn the television up please." The local news is on and the ex-army veteran is on the television as we eat, he is being interviewed about the graciousness of strangers. They want to know how his mystery park benefactor gave him hope! What the hell? Had someone tipped them off to Ben's generosity, because it wasn't me. The homeless are it seems, in protest about the changes in the law that allows them to sleep rough in the park, they now have to be out of the park at one in the morning and face being fined and or even imprisoned for being there, and news crews are covering the protest there.

"My benefactor is one hell of a decent guy. He didn't need to do it, he could've driven away and not given me another thought, but he isn't like that. No, he's never like that, he did for me, what he does a lot in this park, he gave me food and drink for a couple of days and money for two months in an apartment and he isn't a mystery, it's The Yorkers favourite pitcher, Ben Lordie Lord. He didn't think I recognised him, but he always has time for us vets when he's out running, he stops and talks.

Sometimes folks we like to be spoken to and not at or down to, that some days is as good as a warm jumper or a blanket. Just the thought you care enough to give us your time. He gives us clothes and kindness too; he's even been known to give the fucking shoes off his feet. He gives people money for food and shelter, he pays for treatment for the injures that the youth of today inflict upon us, in the name of fun, a week's hospital visits doesn't come cheap, ask ole Henry, they goddamned nearly killed him until Ben stepped in, and he does it on the QT too.

He has been doing it for years, he comes in here all the time giving food out and warm clothes and he's not as the press make him out to be, they don't know the Ben Lord as we do. Enough said, he's a private person, he doesn't do it for all the publicity, or he would have a film crew with him as some of the others do. Not Ben, no, there isn't anything condescending about giving you the literal shoes off your feet. They capture every single moment of their condescending gift giving, all on fucking camera, they love to be seen to be doing their bit for the fallen heroes. What the fuck do I do with a tee shirt in bloody winter? So remember folks talk to us, not down at to us, we're only human?" He walks away from the camera after saluting Ben to the camera. The reporter is lost for words, as it was live, they can't edit the swearing coming from Stevie's mouth.

"God Mr Lord, if I didn't love you before, you have me now. That was so wonderful, why keep that a secret?" He looks sad, as I plonk myself on his knee and kiss him, my man can sure kiss.

"Most of the guys I help are like that guy Stevie, they're proud and don't take hand outs, willingly or easily. I gave my jacket, joggers and runners to a guy in the park, who was freezing and in need when I first got the apartment here. I came back emptied my closet of stuff, stuff I've coming out of my yin-yang and all given to me for free, so I gave it to those who needed it. I don't do it all the time, as he said there's always someone with a camera catching his or her charitable work. That's why I only do it behind closed doors. Your lips Penny and what you can do with them, is reason enough to give away all my stuff, if it gets me more of them and often." Kisses are given as his reward for his unselfish deeds. We finish breakfast and get dressed.

Then head down to the garage for the car, and I get in the right door this time. Well, in two days he has captured New Yorkers attention again and in a good way this time. We head to the stadium and I love being near to him, it gives me goose bumps and a warm fuzzy feeling inside, as he rests his hand in mine. We are being photographed whilst driving through the gates at the stadium, he winds the window down to sign autographs, when suddenly a barrage of questions about his love child begin.

"Ben what's the truth in the employee having your child? Are you going to marry her? Do you want to be with the baby's mamma? Does the new girl know? How many more times are you going to screw up this week Lordie?" I smile for the cameras.

"The girl in question, and yes there is a girl, who is working with me, not for me and yeah my girlfriend knows, and really isn't happy about the lies you're peddling as truths, as she's the one in question. It was a private, very, private conversation whilst we were discussing our future. What I actually said was, that I couldn't wait to be a father, not that I was about to become one. We were discussing our future and that, is no one else's business but ours. You really should get your facts straight before you print lies, cheers guys. Work to do and a girlfriend to propose to, I mean, calm down now thanks buddy." I am for want of another word floored, floored that he said that, now I feel funny, I want and need fresh air. Did he just propose via the scum sucking pond life? No, he did it to quell the false rumour of impregnating an employee. He opened his door, grabs his bag and as he comes around, he helps me down, kissing me tenderly as he does. He smiles, and I kick his shin, take my bags and head into a flurry of activity. Trudy is waiting for me in my temporary office.

"Good morning Penny, it seems you uncovered a big fraud going on at Hart and Co. The government auditors are in with them as we speak, tax and federal. It's a hell of a mess and our legal team want to see you too and see how you managed to spot this in under a week. The FBI wants to talk to you too they're all in, this is massive and about to get even bigger. Congratulations on your progress with Ben too, thanks to the hilarious television thing, we've been inundated with help for the park vets.

There's also been more than a few colleges in touch, and all are wanting to offer young Thomas scholarship deals. That video touched my heart, I always knew Ben was a secret saint and a sadness about him when he talked about his father, he always has time for the kids that hang around the stadium, why would he be any different outside? They're ready when you are in conference room two, and it's being videoed, I'm just giving you the heads up, because you need to do your lips again, he's smudged off your lipstick." She winks, and I blush.

The smile on my face aches, as she walks back to her office. I retrieve the flash drive from my purse. Which has copies of all my dealings with Hart and Co, it shows exactly how I found the first of many wrong doings that day. It really was a fluke too. Ben had previously bought a thousand jerseys, to give away to children and I was looking to see where he bought his previous jerseys from, so that I could buy from them again. According to the dodgy accountant's bookkeeping, they purchased them from a firm that went bust ten years ago. The same thing had happened with the summer camp, I looked at the baseball suppliers he used for the camp, intending to send them to schools in the area. I found out that the camp he regularly sends supplies and a healthy cheque to, folded in the eighties.

I check my lips and head in. I gave them my memory stick, along with the one from Ben's it has password protected files on it. Then finally, after three hours of talking things through and arguing with lawyers and the FBI, I'm in sore need of a stiff drink. I tell them too about this morning's happenings giving them her address whilst she's in England. They are arranging to pick her up from the airport as we speak. She will be a very good witness, as she was present and named in a few of the documents and could be the key witness in bringing down the whole team at Hart and Co.

I'm finally allowed to leave the room, when they have everything they needed. This had the potential to be billion-dollar fraud, involving all their clients who have in many different ways, been cheated out of money. As well as the tax department, they haven't paid anybody's correct amounts in due taxes, since the eldest of the Harts died leaving Junior running the company, and he'd run it into the ground in two short years. He has fled the country and they hope to catch him soon, so he can help them with their enquiries. Evading paying proper taxes is big here and carries real jail time. I believe that's what they jailed Mr Capone for, eventually.

I leave the room and head for the fresh air of the field, it was a good job I had everything sorted yesterday for the rest of the week, because the whole morning was taken up with the investigation. I walk towards the field and he's there pitching to an empty cage. I take off my shoes and head in his direction. I drop my shoes, take of my jacket, put it down and pick up a bat. I take a swing at the next ball he throws at me and I miss.

"Just warming up, it may have been a while since I've done this, go on then." He smiles and pitches me a softball, whack as the cork hits the metal bat, another and whack, another whack. "That all you got Lordie, those are girl pitches?" He smiles and gives me a faster ball, which I missed. Another, whack and another whack, we have an audience, as kids are now watching, another faster one and I miss, and another whack. I smile as he walks towards me. I get the much needed hug, and the sweetest of his kisses.

"Wow, Baby that was a nice interlude, in a very uneventful morning, how have you been?" I can't tell him yet, as we have an audience. I point at the group of fresh faced kids and he goes to sign autographs. I pass him a marker and more photos then I add them to Facebook. I note he has half a million likes on Facebook and his video has gone viral on You Tube. I answer a call from a local television studio, asking for an interview.

"He's busy all week, he has a really small window this afternoon. He's skating in Central Park, at the Laskers Rink with a few children. This isn't a publicity stunt though, he was asked and being his new management consultant, I'm trying to cram in as many meet and greets, as I can. As it is, we are eating into all his down time and will be doing for the next few weeks until they head out for training in Florida. We're there from two, so if you come, you come." I sigh as he comes in for a hug. I've to tell him its way messier than I thought.

"Milady hurt my shin this morning, were you trying to put me out for the season? Penny what's the matter?"

"I've had a full morning in with the FBI, this is bigger than I thought way, way bigger, it must be serious as they have been really bad in the paying of everyone's, tax payments, staff, clients and their own company taxes. They, as you know, used subsidiary companies of theirs, to do your accounts and be your lawyer. The FBI's in there now, there's a massive fraud case underway and they have stepped in and are doing what they do best running the show. They thanked me for bringing it to their attention." My head ached, why'd nobody seen this? We head in and he helps me on with my jacket and hands me my shoes. "Ben, we have to get moving soon as we have loads to do today, and we still have yet to pick up the food and then get to the ice rink"

"So, you're still angry about my real romantic proposal then?"

"Oh, is that what that was? I thought that was just good press handling Ben. You really need to work on that proposal thing." He slapped my backside and went to change.

"I'll do just that Milady, be warned, I'm more the spare of the moment sort of guy though, as you know Milady." We head to the deli, the providers of our picnic yesterday, having ordered the same but enough to feed fifty, plus cheesecakes, their speciality and apparently to die for and three massive Thermos's of hot chocolate too. "You're really quiet Penny, is the whole baby thing upsetting you?"

"No, that's not a problem really it isn't, it's us sleeping together and working together, I'm not sure what you want out of either relationship, the working or the personal one?"

"I know the proposal thing was a shock but when I actually said it, to cover the news leak, I actually liked the idea." I smiled as he stroked my cheek, after he pulled over and parked the car in front of the deli. Ten minutes later the boxes are loaded and in the back. I had sat and pondered his non-proposal and I had to admit I liked the idea of being with him.

"I admit I was shocked, but I liked the idea when you said it, I won't lie Ben. We'd better make our way there and entertain the kids then. You do skate I presume?"

"As well as I make love." He winks.

"Well, that's either, really, really well, or you don't go to the same rink more than twice?"

"No, Milady's is the only rink I'll be skating in from now on and I feel like skating in there right now." He laughs as we pull into the space to unload by the ice. Children are already arriving and being kitted out, he helps me unload the food to the club house and I set about getting it all sorted, he's on the ice with the kids and their family's when I finish.

"Miss Daniels? Gary Grayson, reporter for News Link New York, I believe you're expecting me?" I look flustered, Ben is with the children already.

"As you can see, he's a little busy but he has said he will do a short interview. First and foremost, he's here for those children, remembering that, I think it would be good if you could perhaps get on the ice and join them. Film it whilst he's on there with them, but trying if you can, not to get them in too many of the shots and don't push them to talk. Some of them have had a bad time and are very emotional and frightened young children, if you can agree to that, the interview is yours?" He looks at the camera operator.

They agree it's doable. I canvas the parents they are fine with their children being on television. I put on my skates as the television crew set up. It's been a while since I've been on the ice. I wonder if it's like riding your bike, you never forget. I step on the ice and take a deep breath and push off, the kids are playing Hockey in the far corner. I still have it and forget I'm here to work and skate, I loved gliding along the ice, I would've loved to skate professionally, but I had to choose dance or skating, I chose dance. Spins re-mastered and I find my feet on the ice. I remember a routine I had to do and skate. Lost in it and loving it this was the time I spent with Daddy, he loved to skate. I wipe a tear away and search out Ben, he and the kids are watching me.

"Sorry, I got lost way back in time there for a minute. Right boy's and girl's there's going to be a television news crew filming you skating and playing hockey, just answer their questions, if they ask you one? Now and this is important, you don't have to answer any questions or be filmed if you don't want to be, if you don't want to just skate away. They are here to do a short interview with Lordie here, and I said they could if they skate, so they're going to try to do it, on skate's, one problem though? The fella doing the interview doesn't skate." The kids all laugh. "A slice of Cheesecake for the one who guesses how many times he falls on his big butt?" They all laugh, and shout figures out. My hand gently pulled, by a cute little girl.

"Can you teach me to skate like that Melody?" I look at a little girl, hanging tightly to Ben.

"I don't see why not, did you come with a big brother, to see Lordie?" She nods. "My name is Penny and he calls me Milady because he thinks he's being funny, shush don't tell him this, he's not at all funny." I take her hand as she wobbles next to me. Ben smiles, his smile is making me grin like an idiot. "Right, he's coming on the ice. You Ben, keep it to facts, and keep calm, this will be, shown in LA too, please stop biting that lip. Concentrate and keep it short, we have another hour and a half here, and then we are at the school for children with special needs. A behind the doors private meet and greet, you've agreed to sponsor a light and sensory room there." I've to keep professional when I'm in public with him, something I'm struggling to do. He doesn't help being a sexy ice hockey player too. His arm snakes around my waist and he pulls me into him. I literally go weak at the knees, as he holds me tightly.

"Where did you learn to skate, Penny? It was nice watching you. I always want to watch you and keep you safe." The camera crew had just captured one of his kisses, and thank you Ben, it was a melt the ice kind of a kiss.

I smile, wave and escape with little Hanna, she really doesn't like it, even skating in my arms, so when I suggest to her we get off the ice, she readily agrees, with the promise that a cup of a hot chocolate will be waiting for her upon the removal of her skates. The Thermos flasks have finally arrived, so the parents and I drink the scolding hot chocolate, as it's freezing here, and we need to keep warm. We are also huddled under heaters, as it's a tad chilly today.

"He really is good with them. We can't thank the people who out this together and at such short notice too, it really was unexpected. We have been asking forever for this, but his fees were always too high." I'm stunned and shocked.

"Ben has never, nor will he ever, charge for an appearance, and I'm so sorry for your wait, his old management team have a lot to answer for. He will be mortified when he hears you were asked for money, especially for doing something he loves to do. He was badly advised before and he's hoping to catch up on meet and greets, before they go to their training camp in Florida." She looks over at Ben and then back at me.

"Will you be going with him?"

"I don't think so, I'll be back in England this time next week and Ben will be better managed by the time I leave." I sigh, because I don't want to leave now, then I wonder what's going to happen about us when I return home.

"Forgive an old woman, but that kiss wasn't a-we-are-just friends-kiss, it was a good-god-almighty-kiss." I laugh.

The ground did move beneath my feet. I watch as he plays hockey, and boy can he skate as well as he makes love. I can't take my eyes of him, its then when I realise that Penelope Daniels has it bad. The news crew are happy with what they have, thanking me for what they have filmed, they are leaving, I offer them food and they take it to go, they have to edit it before it goes to segment. I get a text from security. The FBI has Angela in their custody. I make another series of calls cancelling the flights and Suzie Q, as I'm doing that, I take some time to watch him interact with the kids.

They are coming off the ice and going to eat. I snap pictures and am surprised by the amount on there already, you have to love the kids and their camera phones. I tag Ben in the pictures and upload to the site. Ben and I have to be going to another meeting, so we have to be leaving. The mass of food left uneaten is being donated to a homeless shelter by one of the mothers, as I went overboard on the ordering, but I'm assured it won't go to waste. I climb in the car and try to relax, for some reason I'm so tired.

"I really need to..." A kiss as I sit down in the car stops me speaking, he's frantic with his kisses and I murmur his name into them.

"...I enjoyed that meeting too. Thanks for everything you're doing, have done and thank you in advance for what we do tonight." You're welcome Ben and I think I can safely say Milady is on a promise again.

"The lady I spoke to, she told me your old management charged for all your appearances at these functions and meet and greets. I assured her you didn't and have never done. How low did they go, but that's old news now, how did the news piece go?" I programme the coordinates in the Satnav and Ben drives.

"It was fine, and they started the questions with that kiss. Well, Milady is or soon will be, a news item, because yes, you're my girl and my new manager of my life and my work, you are calming me down and showing me the right way to handle my anger issues. I told them I'm a reformed character since I got my own Jiminy Cricket, I told the whole world I was in love with you Baby and I am. Then they asked all about Thomas. Do you know they have had hundreds of calls about the video?

They are cutting his interview in with that part of the segment too, he has turned into quite the little star. Then they asked about the Vets, who feel they been abandoned by their government, I told them I don't get involved in government and highly motivated political issues but agreed more should and could be done for them and all homeless people. I help on a personal level, where I can and when I can. I told them too, that there is actually a great need for more family friendly homeless shelters, given that more families were now homeless and living in their cars.

One of the little boys, here today with his Mom, lives in a shed, a goddamn fucking shed Penny. Well, they don't now, Trudy is looking for a furnished apartment, as we speak. That issue I said, breaks my heart, he had me the next question though. How could I be so contrite, when I live in a multi-million dollar apartment, in the best hotel in New York, whilst overlooking the homeless each night from the warmth of my hotel room?" I listen as he chats on lyrically, all about the new causes he has vowed to help, and I feel very lucky to have found him.

"You're so right, how am I able comment on issues of homelessness with a straight face, when I live in my Ivory tower, one looking out onto a park where there are hundreds of homeless people living, and all as I sleep under freshly laundered sheets. I told them I had already decided to sell it and look into buying an apartment block and then I will be donating it to one of the shelters, one specifically to house family's long term.

They made a great deal of noise about that one. Do you know Penny that the men and boys sleep in one place, whilst their daughters and wives sleep in another? I didn't know things like that happened today. Fuck, I had fourteen million missing and didn't know about it. What am I? Nothing but an arrogant, overpaid bastard, that's what. I live in a dreamland, well not anymore, I'll be doing more in future, that much I'll swear on."

I amazed at his generosity and the depth he feels when he learns he can help that and his having the money to help them. We make it in plenty of time and we are being flashed again. I didn't tip anyone off to our meeting, this was supposed to be a secret trip, perhaps they do just follow him everywhere? There are no questions from them, just photo's as he links my fingers. We're checked in with security and they walk us to the small classroom, which Ben is sponsoring. When asked by Ben will it be big enough, they tell him the large room would have been better, but the cost is way above the funds they have and though small, the room would be fantastic when finished.

"How much, how much do you need to do both that room and this room?"

"Fifty thousand dollars and eventually we will do both rooms, but for now we are happy to be getting the one done, thank you." I smile as he takes out his cheque book and writes them a personal cheque for the two hundred thousand dollars.

"I would like you to do as many rooms as you can with that, and we have a great sponsorship program at work, I will get my bosses involved. Can I help you get the grounds done though? I've heard of a place in England that has an amazing sensory garden. You know, raised beds, with sweet smelling flowers, grasses that make noises, plants that the kids can feel the textures of and they can smell their fragrances. Water fountains that the kids can run their fingers in, level paths for wheelchairs. Would you leave that with me? I know a gardening contractor, Oscar De La Reiner? He is looking for his next great mission in life and he owes me. He needs to create his masterpiece works of floral art. He thinks he's a modern day Capability Brown, it would have to be in a magazine though? I think his last one was a feature in Martha Stewart's magazine, would that be alright?" She's staggered and gladly agrees. The children would love summers in the sun and now she too is in a flood of tears. I listen as he reels out stories about his cousin's little girl Amy, who was born deaf.

I want him now. He has me swooning and like all the other women, we're hanging off every word he utters. I'm shown the toys the children use every day, and which desperately needed to be replaced. I smile at the simple jingling dumbbell, a fluffy talking toy animal, a torch that sprays out beams of multi-coloured lights. The small toys are all well used and played with. Nothing is expensive or flashy, but they mean a lot to them, I'm told most need replacing as they take quite a hammering. Yet another handkerchief to wipe away a tear is passed my way. I walk away to get myself together and make a phone call to the big toy store in town and ask about opening times, they are to shut soon, but as I explain, they agree to open for us to shop in private. We could be there in twenty minutes. I so wanted to spend some of my pay-off from Garth.

"Fancy a play date Mr Lord? I want to do something different with you." His face is just a huge grin. Boy is he going to be disappointed. Yet when we get there he isn't, it turns out he likes to shop for toys and he's a big kid. We are given a zap gun thing and when we see something we want, we simply zap and press how many we need, I love this, I may be a little zap gun happy. Ben is using like a light sabre from Star Wars and has a huge tub for the soft toy section. I love the throwing in motion my pitcher has, I imagine the faces of each child playing with them. After three hours of shopping, the tubs are ringing through their tills, as are our purchases on the zap gun. I felt really good and as the final amount shows I smile. The money is small change from the money I got from Garth for keeping quiet.

The store offer to pay for the installation of the speciality playground equipment I have just bought, and with their help I know it will be the right thing for their needs, there is everything they could want, to help them to burn of their energy and have fun, and it just so happens it will all fit in the disused basketball court area. Principle Jane had said earlier they took over an old elementary school building, and as the children can't use the space, it was left unused, this would be perfect for the already flat large area and there are included in the specialised jungle gym, things for the smaller more wheelchair users, a large pitching cage too is being incorporated into the design.

Three hours later and a huge amount is spent, along with our smaller purchases there are several large stuffed animal toys that are big enough and sturdy enough, to be climbed and crawled on, the store would deliver them for me tomorrow. They assure me the vans will be there as soon as the school opens, and that their staff will go with the deliveries and un-pack and set it all up for the school, they are also donating spare shelving that they have in their basement and are setting up the schools very own toy store, in one of the rooms.

After a quick phone call to the school and Principle Jane, and after she calms down, it is agreed they can keep or give the children the gifts to take home, there are after all many toys heading their way. I loved the generosity of the store when they know it's for a special school. Ben got his card out to pay and unfortunately for him I have already paid for the things and have beaten him to it. I held his hand as we walked back to the car, escorted there by a full-grown man dressed as a toy soldier. Very strange indeed...

"Another fantastic day Penny, I can't remember feeling this good about myself in ages and it's all down to you."

"I can't take the credit for it all, these past three days you've done most of it and without being prompted or coached. You really are a nice man to know and like."

"Just like, I thought you were kind of falling in love with me?" He makes me blush, damn this man, how does he do it? I'm a strong and independent woman, whom he has giggling and blushing like a young girl.

"I have fallen in love with you, please don't sulk. I was stating a fact you are a nice man to know. Will you do something for me when we get back to your room to prove you love me? Will you order us their biggest burgers and fries? I would love it if you could order me a vanilla shake to go with it. I love you very much, and then you and I are going to watch a chick flick and you will eat popcorn with me, as promised on our first date. Umm, but what movie do we watch? I know, Perfect Catch, the one with Drew Barrymore in it you know, the one where she thinks she has met the perfect guy, until she realise's she has to contend with a baseball team. Oh, and I especially love the fact that you're going to make love to me on that massive sheepskin rug in front of the television, and I love that you love me too." He gawks at me; I gently put my hand under his chin, shut his mouth and kiss it.

"I love your plan and yeah, I love your loves too, all of them, though you don't have to contend with any baseball team Baby, you will always come first." We are in the car park in the hotel after one hell of a quick journey, one I spent the whole time ogling Ben again. He holds me tightly as we head into the hotel, leaving the valet to park his car.

"You're very quiet Penny, is something worrying you?" He holds my hand tighter as I walk beside him; yes, my head is a messed-up space of confusion. I am confused at the speed of our romancing game, and is it just that, a game?

"We're going to be alright aren't we Ben? I'm just not sure things are meant to happen this quickly. Hell, Saturday night I was hammered in Heathrow, waiting for the first morning flight out to JFK, and in that short time we have done some great things and an amazing thing yesterday, then today you sort of propose?" He leans in and scoops me into his arms for a kiss, I can't believe my luck as the guests in the hotel lobby are watching his very public display of affection, let them watch. His kisses have me wanting to kick my shoes off and wrap my legs around him right here, right now.

"I also said I would work on a jaw dropping proposal, I would love it if you married me. In fact, will you marry me?" He puts me down, drops to the floor on one knee and pulls out a ring box, from his jacket and as he flips it open, there are flashes. "Will you please marry me Penny?" I'm stunned as he's on one knee flashing the most beautiful, huge Pink diamond.

"Only Benjamin, if you can promise to love me forever?"

"Hell yes, you've got a deal, and can I have that in writing please, one of your ball breaking contracts will suffice?" I lean down for a kiss.

"Then yes, I'll marry you and yes, my contracts are ball breakers are you sure you want to go there, there are no-way-out clauses and yes, they are mandatory?" He gets up to a flurry of cheers and awes. Putting the ring on my finger, I get one of his kisses. I came to New York on a dare, and now I had a wonderful fiancé. He swoops me into his arms and carries me to the lift and then to his room.

"When did you have a chance to ring shop Ben? That was so not what I expected you to do." He's grinning from ear to ear.

"I went for the ring when you went looking at the pretty dresses yesterday. I hope you like it, sorry, but what do I know about rings? Yours is the first I've ever bought. We can change it if you don't like it." I'm staring at it taking note of its every detail.

"Um, no change needed it's wonderful."

"So, you like it? Milady likes her ring then, only you're a little bit quiet, will you speak to your fiancé please?"

"Um I do, it's perfect and it's beautiful thank you, and no, this one is wonderful and it's so very pretty." Ben laughs and puts me down on the couch, how did we get up here, did he turn into Superman, ummm my own Superman...

Chapter 10:

I'm suddenly hit by a nauseating wave of nerves, I sit and look at the rock on my finger, I've just agreed to marry a stranger damn it. We know very little about each other, other than the sex and the man himself is out of this world, is he really a mind possessing alien? I need locking up because I have just agreed to marry him. His family will have him locked up too as a raving nutter, for doing this. It's all so damned confusing, but I don't care, I'm happy really happy and then the nerves take hold realisation sets in... I have his family to meet... Shit.

"I wonder what your mother and sisters are going to make of this? You meet someone and days later your down on one knee, proposing? They'll have you committed Ben."

"What about your folks Penny, will they be alright with this. Do I have to ask your families permission I know you said your dad is dead too, but what about your mom and grandparents, heck, they will let you marry me won't they?" I sigh, and a tear creeps its way down my face.

"They both died when I was ten. I wasn't close to them in the end. It started out so well too, my life. We were happy, and we did some good things, we were just we three, and then Dad, he went away for a while and when he came back, he was not the same. He and Mum they found God, and I mean really found him. I then got dragged along and turned into some sort of Pious Penny character. The fun disappeared, and my life was then devoted to pleasing them and God. I had fun once, Daddy loved me and Mum, she was perfect, and it suddenly wasn't. They made me feel like a disappointment, like a spoiled child. I hated my childhood, I really did. Then when I was in college, they went on one of their missions to some godforsaken place and ran off the road down a mountain and died. I should have been with them and would have been had I not got exams to take. I thanked God that day for exams."

"Where they strict?"

"Not before my father went missing, and when he got back, he turned to God. I found out he had been captured by some soldiers and tortured. Mum turned to God in asking for his safe return and when he did come back, they both kept their promise. I was left in the care of the nuns and they went on their missions. I spent most of my childhood with Suzie and her family, they were my neighbours and but for them I would have spent the last years in care. They took me in and tried to undo the brainwashing my parents had done."

"Wow, you hide that well. What did he do?"

"He worked for the army and then the foreign office, he was what they call a negotiator, and he was taken captive during a deal and that was when my life turned upside down. I was too much for them, they were too old for a child, you see they had me late in life. Yes, at first it was good, we did some great things together, and then all of a sudden it was like I was their biggest hindrance and they made me pay for it by trying to force God into my life."

"They died when you were ten?"

"No when I was sixteen. I had six years from hell with them and I those were supposed to be the formative years too, they turned me into a different girl a girl afraid of her own shadow and full of devil fearing ways. I hated them and what they turned into in the end. I was about to be put into foster care when The Quills next door took me in. Their daughter Suzie was my best friend growing up, and they tried hard to make me better, but it was hard undoing all my parents had done."

"I'm sorry Penny, I didn't know about your mom, you had said your dad had died and I just presumed you had relatives. Dan never said anything, but then again, we just discussed you as a manager and hiring you as my hot kick arse saviour. Penny can we just talk, how about a bath and we sit in it and just talk, and you Milady, you will always have me." I hope so Mr Lord. I really do hope so. Our meal is delivered in two big bags from the steak house down the block. "Milady's dinner has arrived. Come and get it whilst it's hot, then we bathe and talk." He has delivered on my promise of a burger dinner.

"This isn't room service, so do they really spoil you here? Do they run out and get you anything you need?"

"Pretty much, the concierge, Salvador, is pretty good and knows everyone and can get anything for you, he's like the one from Pretty Woman, Barney Thompson. He sees all and knows all."

"As long as he doesn't think I'm a hooker, I'll be fine. I'll phone down and ask about doctors." Ben is laughing, what has he planned? He has the nicest laugh, deep and sexy. I love his accent too and as he steals my fries, I stare at him and face watch. This shake is orgasmic, God, he can have all my fries if I can have his shake. We get in the bath after dinner and I'm nestled against him as he washes me, kissing me between questions and I'm exhausted and happy.

"Have you only got Suzie Q then, if so your guest list for our wedding's going to be really short and sweet Baby?" I nod, and he washes my back with gentle circular movements with the sponge, which is soaked in the rich, sweet smelling bath oil and then I'm wrapped in his arms. We're all wrinkly after discussing everything from first pets to where we like to holiday, and the all important, how many girls and women, that one is in the girl bible, the one question we all have to have answered. Why I don't know, but one that is always asked? Will I like what I hear, now I have asked a stupid question?

"I've had two girlfriends, whom I wanted to marry, you're here and the other died. I was always looking for Miss Right, but nobody ever had that breath stopping feeling I had when I first saw you. Mom said the right girl would one day just appear and you did. I was an idiot, when first got here. I was a broken hearted kid alone for the first time in twenty years, so I did the boy thing and slept around, and it has to be said with a fair few girls in that first year. As you do apparently if you're an idiot and I was, but in the past two years, there have been just dates. I did see one girl to her room, whilst on my bender, but when I sobered up damn quickly and got out of her room, she wasn't whom I thought she was and she's someone from my past and was and is a very big regret, she had more than one screw loose.

I've been really good since her, just dates and nothing more, they all want something else, money, fame and all that my life brings, so I sort of got fed up of looking. Then as you know, you walked into my life and I was then smitten, you with those long legs and bouncy blonde hair, and then you hooked me, when you did as you did and slated me and scolded me, in a good way I hasten to add, a very good way. You didn't fawn all over like the others. Hell no, you didn't take any prisoners, you kicked my butt from the get go. You were not what I was expecting that day, a girl to walk in and make me fall head over heels in love with her. Mushy stuff over, because your falling asleep Baby. Come on enough chatter please let me get my girl in my comfy bed your tired."

"Um I am thank you, I can't feel my backside in this bath, it's gone to sleep." He wrapped me in a robe and scooped me out, as if I was a small child.

I let the robe fall and climbed naked into his bed. Joining me, he just smiled and held me. I nuzzled into his chest, as he held me tighter, kissing the top of my head, I kissed his chest, and I find out I'm not as tired as I thought I was. I can do this. I kiss his chest and head lower down. He groans as my kisses are going lower. He murmurs his approval as my tongue circles his belly button, he tastes like sweet coconut, my tongue follows the happy trail down to his little man. Yes, he's so nice to feast upon, my eyes gaze upwards and I notice he's watching. I licked my top lip seductively and then with just the tip of my tongue followed the pulsing vein, that ran the length of it, he spread his legs further apart, my hand cupping his balls rubbing the sack and with gentle squeezes, I massage them.

"Penny, please quit with the teasing and play with me and my fellas, they're getting impatient."

"Well he's a demanding thing, isn't he? He has been naughty and needs punishing." That always turned Bella's friends into begging fools.

"Why what did he do?" Wrapping my hair in his hands, he smiled and pulled my head back and kissed my neck.

"He did naughty things against my back, in the bath and then you didn't do anything about it." He laughed, as I began licking him slowly, as I did, he closed his eyes and lay down.

I slipped him into my mouth, his knees came up and he groaned louder. In and out it went, I took him the whole way back, he was falling apart at the seams, with his crying and groaning, the heels of his feet digging in the bed, as I pulled him out, licking the end and running my tongue under the deep ridge of his dick and played there for a while, then with him back know in my mouth. I'm running my hands over his chiselled stomach. Ben releases a sigh, a long relaxing moan and God he was making a melodious sound, which made me doing this, a very nice reward. He stiffened and was begging me to stop. I ignored him as I'm enjoying the pleasure I get from pleasing him this way, the deep pleas are ignored, as his breath becomes laboured, I take him deeper, his silky length is now wet from his salty arousal and my mouth, the noises we are making are turning me on.

"No, Penny I want to make love to you now, no more please." I sucked harder and continued slipping him in out of my mouth, playing with the tip as my tongue carried on caressing it, he shivered. Taking him in again and quickly bobbing my head up and down on him, he let out a long groan, sexy and deep, guttural almost. The culmination of my furious, harried mouth actions on him and the massaging of his balls, he finally fills my mouth and as he finishes, he shakes to a frantic end. I swallowed the stuff, which is not that great in the taste department.

"Oh hell, you didn't just do that, get that mouth up here? I can't believe you did that. Lord, help you now I intend to get my revenge, but how do you suggest getting it?" He rolled on top of me. "Tit for tat; Milady, I'm thinking a lot of tit and a lot of tat for that."

His hand cupped my sex, and his fingers begin to explore, yes lots of that, please. They began with the strip of hair leading to my sex, his finger lovingly caressing the area, stroking and massaging it, then a finger traced the line of the hot holds, not pushing in just slow movements up and down, he found my pleasure spot, well it always gives me pleasure. Oh hell, no... I'm coming, and he hasn't even started... Hell, yesss.

"Penny you're so wet and whilst I think of my revenge, I'll leave you to guess how many times you're going to come before you beg me to stop?"

"Once, is more than enough thank you, stop please and make love to me, I'm begging please."

"No, Milady was a bad girl. Baby a very bad girl, I like how you feel when I do this." I moan in thanks as he slips in a finger.

As he places it inside I can feel it as he puts another in too and expands his fingers wider and wider, lord it's a fantastic feeling, his thumb is running over the same spot. I can't hold back as I get a chill throughout my body, my backside arches into his fingers and I submit to the heady orgasm, my eyes shut tight and the tears begin to escape, it is a pleasure and a pain, but it feels odd, it's so confusing, as it seems to rip me in two, yet I want more. Then I'm suddenly gasping, moaning and begin panting as it ends, slowly I come down and wow that was more than tit for tat, that was unbelievably fantastic. He then moves down the bed and his tongue takes the place of his fingers, how can this be so damned good? I'm drowning in emotions and the feelings of dread and wonderment begin shooting through my body, it's so different and strange, it hurts in a nice way and hurts in a strange way, it's so confusing, and I can't handle it.

"Please stop, Ben, please." My muscles begin to tense up, and I get light headed and dizzy, I can't keep my body still, I get a head rush and I start to cry again. I think I pass out for a second or two, I cry as he cradles me in his arms, and I sob into his chest.

"Penny, are you alright you begged me to stop, so I did, shit, are you alright? Speak to me Baby are you alright?"

"Um... I... I... I loved what you did. I just needed you to stop whilst I came, but I couldn't stop, it wouldn't stop, even when you did, it carried on, God that was, that was fantastic. Ben that was just so fantastic, it was a myriad of mini orgasms, each one, rocked me to my core, oh hell why did you stop Ben?" He laughs and hugs me tighter.

"So, we're good? I don't want to hurt you, really I don't."

"These are happy tears idiot, because it was so good, it was out of this world amazing and I'm a little pissed you stopped, actually." He looked so worried, what did I know? He pulled me to him. "Thank you for stopping, but can you finish what you started? Like now."

"Well okay, but only because you asked so nicely, I may let you have a bit more, as long as you're really alright?" I pulled him on top of me and he leant down and kissed my neck gently nipping at my shoulder.

He leant into the bedside drawer and removed a condom, ripped it open and gave it me to put on, pinching the end as I rolled it slowly down, he began groaning as I massaged his balls and I looked at my handy work. His kissed me as he hovered near my sex, then he began teasing me with the tip repeatedly, then and in one sharp thrust he was in me, buried to the hilt, the feelings were building again, lord I wish I knew more, I wish I could do more, I feel sooo needy just lying here and getting all this pleasure, am I good enough for him?

His gentle touches and slow rocking movements were building to a slow and magical crescendo, the increased friction between our bodies made our skin hot and sweaty, the noises of our bodies, now that they were slick with the wetness of our lovemaking, is loud, the build up is increased, the sound in my ears are like a drum beat pa boom pa boom, my heart is beating faster boom, boom, boom. I wanted more, he wanted to give more, harder and harder he pounded his length into me, and as I held him, I scratched him, and I bit him.

We are almost primal, we are wild, sweaty and then finally my head exploded as he brought me to my knees with another life threatening orgasmic crash, before he too collapsed empty and smiling. Why did his smile rock me to my core? Why did his touches make me a quivering wreck, his voice sent my ears on a mission to hear more, my lips to taste more, oh hell I just wanted more of him full stop, you're greedy, Penny very greedy you are a hot sweaty and thoroughly sated wonton hussy, bursting at the seams with happiness and sore in places I never imagined days ago any man, let alone this God of a man, would ever see or use with such earth shattering precision. I was marrying a sex God and my body ached for more.

"Baby you had me worried, was I hurting you?" His thrusts had been short and controlled before, as though he didn't want to hurt me, that was nice too, but this was like every birthday and Christmas rolled into one big party, wow was too little a word to describe the state my body and I were in. "That was fantastic, Penny you are in my bed and my life and boy do I love you. I can't get over how good we are together, we Milady, are meant to be." I couldn't reply. I was just too tired to do anything but smile. He takes himself out laughing as he takes the condom off and throws it in the bin. I need to sleep, I'm so tired, he drains my energy and now I'm knackered. This having sex thing is like running a double marathon.

"Shush, I need to sleep, I ache Ben and in places I didn't know I could, you may have broken my nunny, I feel different and definitely sore and I need to get fitter if that's you taking it easy baby?" He laughed.

"Go and grab a bath or shower Penny, it may take some of the aches away from your nunny." He laughs at me again. "I need to see what they did with the television interview. I will join you after it's through." Doing as I was told I climbed into the bubble filled bath, the hot water in the bath felt great, it had actually soothed the achy bits. I felt so refreshed and clean as I stepped out wrapped in the robe and a towel wrapped around my wet hair, I sat on his lap after the segment had finished, Ben was laughing and holding me on his lap tightly.

"The fellas will rip me a new one tomorrow. Shit Penny you've turned me into a lovesick sap, weren't you meant to be waiting for me in the tub?" I smiled. Right back at ya Ben, he had turned me into a sex craved woman, who can't keep her hands off her one and only client.

"I am too sore for anymore, and I really need to go to the doctors tomorrow, I'm cutting it fine with getting covered immediately. So whilst you're at the stadium working on being good, tomorrow, I'll be working at being good to go."

"I like the thought being good to go, I'm always good to go with you and without using those things? how sore did I make you Baby" He pulled me into an amazing kiss, so soft and gentle.

"Deliciously sore, and I am up for more later, if you are? I need to go for a run, apart from our very sporty bedroom antics, I've not been for a run here and I'm running the London Marathon in April. Up until coming here, I trained every day and ran into work every morning, which reminds me..."

I slip into Ben's closet and look for my holdall, he'd had me move in with him, I apparently need to test the goods at all times of the day and night, all my things, including the waffle iron, yes, I was asked why I packed it, he loved the reply, that I do like waffles! My bags were in the apartment, condo, rooms or whatever it is, when we got back from the school. So sure of himself, I would accept his proposal he'd had the staff move my things, he knew me so well, and that was strange too, was I so easy to have, did I give in too easily, it seems I am. Give me a man mountain of body, a heart full of love and a killer smile and I'm anyone's, well this man mountain anyway.

"Yes... I've got it, I thought I may have been too drunk to pack it."

"That's nice what is it, it looks like a watch I have of Dads from the eighties? A Casio calculator wristwatch that was so cool back in the day." I smile the one gift from Garth I kept.

"A watch, excuse the pun," I take a USB wire and connect the 'watch' to my laptop and type in my password, Benny Boy and he laughs, "I change my password daily, don't grin, this is something that Garth's company is working on, it's great. To you and I and anyone else, it looks like a watch but it's really new and way smaller location beacon and map thing a Global Positioning System in the form of a watch, smaller than all other devices on the market, it's one of his many new communications toys that he was working on when I left him. He's working on one that all new babies will have placed in them upon their birth, that's way freaky too. I am going off point here, though he did suggest I trialled that thing jokingly one day, I hope he was joking, but I refused, and he gave me this instead, he liked to keep tabs on me. Strange perverted little man, Oops I'm digressing again.

It's a GPS and tracking monitor for runners, it called a Jog Buddy. It allows the computer here to pick up my run and analyses all the data from my heart rate to the calorie burn, the pace I set, everything I need it does, apart from actually run for me. It picks up my location automatically, and then follows my run. It takes in the speed I ran at, my breaks. The routes are all loaded on board, and this clever little thing can even tell me if the course I took was flat or hilly, it is great. It even shows me the optimum pathways for increasing cardio and length of the course pointing out hidden dangers and stuff. I once ran up a mountain, yes by accident, I realised the short run had turned into an hour long marathon and I was dying and I was out of breath.

I flipped this button and realised I'd asked it for the largest trajectory on my possible run. When I upload to my laptop, after getting back from my run, it feeds all my details into the program and tells me how bad or good I was and my times. It really is going to be big when he gets it to the markets later this year; it's so small and as you say it looks just like a watch. Woman will like it and fellas will love the technology. I ran in Paris here see in November; it shows where I was. I simply click on the icon and it logs me as on as being here at this address, 768 5th Avenue, New York, NY, United States. Is that the right address?" He nods.

"Cool that is awesome, I like the techie stuff and we have to wear them in matches, they do all sorts of monitoring too. This world is so technology orientated, its mind blowing. Stick to the main paths Penny and you should be fine. I love the runs in the park and there are always plenty of people to run with. Should we have a look at my dumb arse proposal then?" I went on YouTube and sure enough, there we were. Him looking damn fine in his skating gear and me standing like a dork, grinning like a fool and then that very public kiss as I said yes, seeing you as everyone else does is quite err, funny and sweet, I don't know but different? That was certainly different and yes, I looked goofy and strangely happy.

"I don't think that looks bad, in fact that looked damn romantic. I told you I was a parce ad momentum, sort of guy. Do what you need to do Penny on there and then go to bed. I'm going for a shower." Mr Bossy Boots leaves me with a toe-curling kiss, and he disappeared, singing in the shower. I did the few things I needed to do, I answered my emails, and then did I was told and climbed in bed. He looked so gorgeous stepping back in the room butt naked, like the first time I saw that fine backside of his. I smiled remembering it and it was something he noticed too.

"Are you enjoying the view Milady? I'm spoken for I'm afraid and my fiancée wouldn't like your ogling of my naked butt."

"Um, my fiancé had better get that butt back in this bed now. I need the bits it's connected to, to make mad and passionate love to me again, if that isn't a hard request for you to fill?" He jumped on the bed and gave me something to um about, repeatedly.

Chapter 11:

Waking up to Ben getting out of the shower, fresh from the gym and ready for breakfast, I sat on the bed looking at him hugging my knees and smiling, this was so not what I envisaged would happen when I stepped off the plane Sunday. To meet a hunky man, be engaged to the same said hunky man and fall so head first in love with him, but in love I definitely was.

"Ogling again Milady? Come on eat your breakfast, are you going to be alright at the doctors today? I can come with you if you want me too?"

"I don't think seeing a gynaecologist with me would be on top of your list. No, I'll meet you after because we are at two schools this afternoon. Trudy has a list for the next couple of days, so she can confirm or deny when she needs to. They're getting nothing but positive feedback from everything you have done. Ben keep your temper in check, and you should be fine. I'll meet you there and I need to buy some more clothes and things, seeing as I'm stopping longer and have a future mother-in-law to meet?"

"Mom is going to love you. Here use my card and get whatever you need."

"Benjamin, I've enough money of my own. I'm as they say independently wealthy, I've got plenty of money, Dad and Mum left me rather well off and I have never touched their insurance pay out, though their church did ask for a donation, so I gave them all their God bothering stuff back. I don't have to work Ben, I do it because I want to. I promise I have more than enough money but thank you for the offer though."

I carried on eating my breakfast, watching him eat whilst he watched the news. I gave him the addresses of the schools and times. After a kiss and cuddle, it was as if I was leaving him for good, he finally, after several failed attempts to leave, left me alone and it felt strange. We'd been practically joined at the hip since Monday, it just seemed odd that I was missing him already. Lord this being in love thing is a hard thing to understand Penny.

After my breakfast, shower and getting changed I called down for the address and number of a local doctor. My appointment with the doctor was booked, it's just up the block from the hotel and that was after lunch, so I've time for shopping and then back for a quick hour in the park for a jog. I went for coffee and then I shopped. Dresses and all the things I needed were bought. I had to sell more of my soul for some pretty shoes, yet again. I headed back to the hotel, loaded down. I'd a handful of messages at the front desk. I thanked them and headed up to the rooms.

I can't get my head around the fact of living in a hotel. I want a nice house and picket fence type of place, the same type of house that little Susan dreams of living in, I want one just like the one in Miracle on 34th street too. I wonder too were we will end up living? I had to start thinking of the practical things.

He has a house, sorry condominium near his mother's, because he's already had an offer on this place, and he has accepted it. If he hadn't paid over the top for it though, damn Hart and Co again, because they had upped the amount, gullible Ben actually needed to pay for it. He would have made more towards the apartment blocks he's found. No, he doesn't mess around either, when he makes his mind up he acts quickly, finding not one but two apartment blocks and he's buying them both and go figure things move quickly here, too quickly, it feels like I'm on a super scary rollercoaster ride.

Looking through the messages I see one from Thomas's Aunt Pippa, she has a surprise for me and wants me to meet her in the park? I can meet her when I go for a run. The others are requests for interviews to discuss our quick engagement. Two wedding planners have offered their services and a message from Dan saying congratulations to us both, he was heading to London today at two, back to England and hopefully he gets his head sorted out. I make a quick phone call to Ben, but it goes through to voicemail.

"Hi Ben, it is I, your fiancée and if I've to leave my name I would be mad at you for forgetting you'd asked me to marry you, and I'm glad you did Ben so very glad. We're good to go after two today. I've an appointment with a doctor up the street from the hotel, thanks to Salvador. I'll go straight after my run, I'll try not to be late, but if I'm not at the first meet and greet, I'll see you at the second, I'm meeting with Aunt Pippa too, you know Thomas's Aunt? She's left a message she has a surprise for me, I don't do surprises, normally. You were one hell of a surprise, Ben a wondrous surprise and I love you and will see you later."

I change for my run, putting on my Jog Buddy and plugging in my iPhone, I grab a water and towel and set off, doing the safe route around the edge of the park, I'm not sure about doing a run in the actual park though, I will see when I get there, when I see where the other runners are, as this place is a Mecca for runners! When I get there, I see there are hundreds of people exercising in the park, either running, jogging, walking, busy doing calming yoga or Tai Chi. I've found the jogger's Mecca and I am here too, there are groups, singles, couples, people with dogs and prams so I decide I'll be fine. I put in my earphones and setting my Jog Buddy for a gentle run for forty minutes and noting the time I need to get a jog on. I now only have half an hour before my meeting with Aunt Pippa.

This is bliss, and I've got Eric for company, and he sings just to me. You have to love Mr Clapton. My favourite song comes on and I set off, I lose myself in the song, taking in the things around me. All this is such bliss, the songs, the fresh air, and the path in front of me still to run, after a quick check of my Buddy and I'm fine, and another section of the park is seen. I wave at the army chap, Stevie and he waves back, he looks different when he is clean-shaven and tidy. The clothes he has on look familiar, Mr Impulsive, has been in again.

When does he sneak out, whilst I'm sleeping? I pass the road through the park, when suddenly I lose the plot as a van pulls up right smack bang in my path, nearly running me over. Bloody hell do I rant and rave at the idiot driving it, and in what seems like slow motion action movie, there are suddenly two men at my side, and they are dragging me kicking and screaming into the open side panel of a van, they hurt as they manhandle me. My head hits the vans inside panel, and I cry out in pain.

"Shit, shit, oh shit help someone help me please?" I scream aloud for help, hell what's happening and why's it happening? Mr Clapton help me, the smell on the cloth being held tightly over my mouth is the last thing I remember...

Waking up, and I'm feeling like I've been hit by a bus. I'm missing my phone: my iPod, my watch, my jewellery and shit my ring has gone. I try to get my bearings, its dark and there is a smell of disinfectant, bleach and pine, it's a clean room but the room is too dark. I have on my clothes, though my mouth is dry, and I want to be sick. Hell, where am I? I'm in the dark though and I'm tied to a bed, the taste in my mouth is vile, blood and bile, I think? I hear voices and I'm not sure where they are coming from so I scream.

"Helllllllp... Help, help, help me someone, please help me, why are you doing this where am I? God, help you when I get you." I can hear a familiar voice I can't place it, but it's one I recognise, and he's laughing.

"Make yourself comfy Miss Daniels, you're going to be with us a while. I told you, you were messing with the wrong man, you bitch." Bob Howarth. Hell, I really am in big trouble now, I'm afraid. Then he begins pushing me and dragging me, he slaps me, and I scream as the pain flows through my cheek. He laughs as he throws me back on the bed.

"What do you expect to get from me? I've not got your money, the FBI's in charge?" I scream at him.

"You have a memory stick, which belongs to me or rather lover boy does. It has on it all the banking details and I need it, so bitch where it is? I remember having it at lover boys. I'll need that one seeing as I can't get to the other copies from either work or my home and all thanks to you bitch. I've nothing left and nothing to lose, the wasp's nest is buzzing bitch, and you're going to sort this out and you will do it now. I warned you not to fuck with me." His hand it comes across my face again and I scream as the tears flow. He rags my hair and pulls it hard, so hard I think I may have a bald patch. He pulls my face to his, don't kiss me I bite. Looking into my eyes, I feel like he's going to kill me, his eyes are evil. I'm afraid as his palm strikes my cheek again and I feel the back of his hand strikes my ear. Then I try to retaliate by kicking him. "Where do you suggest we look? I'm sure you know where we need to look?" His eyes tell me not to mess with him. He has someone on the other end of his mobile, he tells them to wait.

"It's possibly in Ben's office at the hotel, please don't harm him, you have me." I feel sick.

"Check the big guys home office yeah and be quick he's due back from training pretty soon." He looks at me again thank God Ben is out all day, but he won't know that. "We're searching it now, thanks for the key, it made for getting in easier. Now shut the fuck up." He smacks my face and again so hard. I won't cry this time you bastard, I won't cry.

He leaves me alone for ages. I sit on the edge of a bed frightened and I can't get free of the rope. I need the toilet. The cloth it comes over my mouth again and blackness surrounds me. I wake and feel like crap, hungry and sick, the blood on my face has dried, whilst I slept. I can taste the metallic traits of the blood in my mouth and I feel sick. My nose too from the feeling I am getting, has been bleeding? Hell, I still need the toilet, I won't wet myself, I will not be embarrassed and wet the bed, no I won't but the more I say no, the more it says yes.

"I need the toilet. Can someone please take me to the toilet, please?" I shout out repeatedly and I hear footsteps, and then a light goes on in the room and it temporarily blinds me. Someone whom I hadn't seen before, a tall, stocky man walks towards me and as I cower away from him, but I have no need to, as he gently unties the ropes, leaving on the handcuffs. He leads me to a small bathroom, he is still not speaking, he simply shows me into the room and closes the door gently, and all done with a surprising amount of kindness, maybe he will be the one to let me go?

I look for a way out and it's hopeless, it's a mid-building enclosed toilet, with no means of escape, hells teeth. I use the toilet, wash my hands and try to clean up. There are plenty of wipes and cloths and I look for some sort of clue as to where I'm, it's a sort of hotel bathroom, but not? The massive mirrors everywhere are daunting. Are they two-way ones, do they perve on you from behind them? My face, I look at in a shiver, then splash it with water and towel it dry. It's already red and turning darker and fuck, it hurts. It looks better without the dried blood and it's really sore to the touch. I swirl the water around in my mouth and the horrid metallic blood taste lessens, so perhaps I won't feel as sick now?

The door open's and I walk out, to be put back on the bed. It's definitely a hotel room of sorts, it's very strange though, the room itself looks unusual. A bedroom, but again with no windows, just a massive bed, a dresser, mirrors and an unusual clothes holder and a wardrobe along one whole wall and I wonder if there's something in there to help me escape. I just need to free myself from the rope, which is tied around the handcuffs and then to the bed, can I bite at the rope, can I free myself?

There is a beautiful mirror above the dresser, it's large and rococo in design, gilt framed and long and rather resplendent. I quite like the placement over the large dresser too, a very good interior design trick to make the room seem bigger, very nice. What the fuck Penny? You're being held prisoner and you're assessing the décor of the place, whilst you sit tied to the bed. It's then I notice it has the whole of the bed reflected into it. Kinky stuff goes on in this room. Then I realise clotheshorse is some sort of rack for punishment, there are I note, restraints and leather straps attached to it. Holy crap I'm in an erotic club, one like the ones the 'Slocomb Slut Club' attend, bloody hell. I'm re-tied to the bed and the cloth is put back over my mouth again. I wake again Lord knows how much later, to be given a tray of food.

I'm hungry and so thirsty. I can taste blood in my mouth again and I think I need a dentist? How long have I been here? I look at the man and he still doesn't say anything. He simply loosens the ropes, enough for me to be able to eat. He leaves me alone. I smell the food and tentatively taste it, but the water I drink and drink and then I'm surprised as the door flings open.

"Argh Penelope you're awake, we've had no joy with the stick at the hotel room, and so I'm thinking that perhaps Ben will know where it is? We need to ask him. We don't need to be as nice in how we ask him either." I should have just told him.

"The FBI has it, a white stick with your paper trail and a few password protected files on it, is that the memory stick which has me held hostage?" He growls at me and he throws the tray of food towards the wall. I wasn't that hungry any way.

I'm reeling in pain, as the back of his hand flashes over my cheek again and he lashes out and hits me repeatedly. I kick him hard to the nuts, as he comes in for another smack, he left his mid wicket uncovered, that was a big mistake, but then hell the pain I feel as he smacks me again and again and has the two men hold my legs. God know what are they going to do? Not that no. Not that. That's just for Ben, no, no, no. I look into his eyes and he's turned on, help me someone help me no. He pulls back and smiles as he rags my hair again.

"You could have told me that before and saved me the trouble of wrecking a perfectly nice hotel suite bitch. Now we have to do things differently." The ropes and the handcuffs, which are now biting into my wrists, are bleeding as he pulls me about. This is really hurting me. "We need money and you will get us it. Your lover will pay to get you back and we want all our money back, all of it. You pissed Junior off, and he takes payment in kind and so he's having you. He's a nasty bastard in the bedroom, or so I believe. When he gets back into town, he's coming here to thank you in person, something for you to look forward to at the weekend. You're in for something really special. You'll know what it feels like to poke a wasp's nest or rather that cute arse of yours will?" He shouts at the skinny man who listens and nods.

"Get her showered, and before he gets here. He wants her naked and strapped to the bed face down. Use the restraints in the drawers there and make sure the cameras are set up too. He wants it all to be filmed. He intends to give Mr Lord a copy of him having his girl. Junior wasn't impressed after learning he'd started this whole thing by getting her involved. He needs him to watch as Junior enjoys his fiancée, because when he has finished with you, you won't be fit for sex again.

Either with him or anyone for months after, should you even survive? The sessions he has planned for you, even by his standards they are to be gruesome. Let's have a look at the toys you will be playing with, shall we?" He opens the wall cupboard and fuck-a-duck, there are within it, all manner of erotic toys, whips, canes and fly swot floggers of all descriptions. He shows me things that Bella had and by the plastic bucket load at home, and some that I'm sure, she would love to own. I'm afraid now but I just smile and look away.

"He has a real passion for arse apparently. The fresher the better and well he's taking hers. So, make sure the toys are good to go too, all the batteries are fresh because he intends to play with her a lot. In every which way his deviant soul knows, and he knows a lot of dark, nasty things does our Mr Black Hart." I flinch as he goes to hit me again.

Then one man takes my tray, and the other grabs Howarth's hand, says something in Howarth's ear and he leaves me alone. Howarth then storms out of the room. I thank him for dinner and for saving me from another smack, I'm sure he smiles however he still puts the now familiar cloth over my mouth, then the darkness hits me again. This goes on for what seems like forever, I'm toileted, given water and food. I am feeling so sick. I am woken from my drug induced sleep, when the door suddenly opens, and in doing so it bangs hard against the wall. I can hear it although the sounds are muffled. I can neither see or hear properly, so I scream, and I kick out and I panic, I scream, I kick again!

I still can't see anything as I'm blindfolded. He isn't touching me, not without a fight, not without a fucking fight. Shit there's more than one man, there are men coming in. I can't see faces but I hear voices and I hear many noises. I can't hear properly, as my ears are sore, but I'm also wet and cold. I ache, I taste dry the blood in my mouth again, I'm disorientated, I cry, and I shake. It takes them forever to start whatever they intend to do to me, are they just watching me, will they watch him with me? I cry and scream some more.

"Help me, help me please, don't touch me Hart or so help me God you die and take these perverts with you. Did you hear me?" I'm being untied, and they speak. I scream and punch kick and hit, I try to escape, no, no, no. He speaks, the man on the bed speaks. Nursing a fat lip, but he speaks, he may have had a good old Glasgow kiss. I wish I didn't though, because now my head hurts too.

"Penny take it easy, shush we're the FBI and I'm Agent Lawson. Can you hear me? Here let me take these out?" He pulls a set of grommets from my ears, thank God, I'm not deaf, they were just things stopping me seeing and hearing that they said. "Shush your safe. Come on let's get you out of here." He wraps me in a warm, dry blanket and a man picks me up and carries me out, he smells nice, as I lay in his arms. I blink as the bright light of the sunshine, it hurts my eyes, and I shield them from it. The agent called Lawson, he puts me in the back of a fire truck, where's the fire, is that why they came? "We have Mr Howarth in custody and he's quite the nasty piece of work. Are you alright to speak?" I nod as my eyes are adjusting to the bright sunlight.

"How long have I been here? I've been asleep most of the time. They grabbed me in the park on Wednesday... They'd interrogate me, feed me and toileted me, but in between they used chloroform to put me to sleep. Oh hell, is Ben alright they were going after him?"

"Mr Lord is fine, and will be waiting for you at the hospital, it's now Saturday. We found your phone in a black van abandoned in the city, we had a report of an abduction of a woman in the park from a group of vets, and they managed to give us the registration number and a tight description of the van and two of your abductors. They also gave us a description of you, and one of them recognised you as Ben Lord's girlfriend.

When you hadn't shown up for your appointments with Mr Lord, he went home to find the place trashed and on listening to your message and phoning the aunt, to ask where she last saw you, she then telling him she hadn't seen nor arranged to meet you. He rang us straight away. He's been besides himself and very vocal on getting you back whatever the cost. Then Hart and Howarth decided on putting in the large ransom demand yesterday, which we were in the process of setting it up..." I remember the conversation.

"Hart Junior, he's coming here at some point over the weekend to thank me, in person." He speaks into thin air to someone and I don't see a phone? Wow, this is like a scene from some spy film. He tells them to clear the building, clear the area and be on high alert for Hart. I'm driven off. Poor Agent Tyler Lawson comes with me, he needs his lip looking at.

"We'll get him and please don't worry; he's been on the run for days we had all his passports and he couldn't run far without funds. He has had little or no money. We've found all the hidden bank accounts thanks to you. The money they stole was in several offshore accounts. All of which have been emptied and the monies placed under our control. He was coming back to get his hands on some hidden money, unfortunately we found that too. According to our source, the plan was to empty the bank accounts and head down to Mexico. When that failed, they only had one place left to get money from.

They put in a large ransom demand for you. Ben wanted to pay, he offered to pay, as did the club, but something that the caller said to Ben made him think. He said he wasn't to call the police and if he did jogging girl would get it. He remembered your jogging watch and with the help of a Mr Garth Davis and Miss Suzanna Quill. We were able to locate you this morning. When we told Ben where you were, he remembered coming here with Hart. He said it was a brothel, a type of private members club for want of a better word, we watched and waited and when Howarth went to pick up the money for your ransom we grabbed him and the others helping him." Thank you, Garth.

"I feel like crap, I smell like crap and I bet I look like crap too, does he have to see me like this?" He smiled.

"You're fine and alive, that's all he'll see Penny. We've to get you checked over for injuries and you know for... I mean we have to see if you were touched in any way, you know inappropriately?" I cringe.

"No, I'm still fine in that department. My tee shirt was still tucked into my shorts, where I left it and I don't think apart from the face smacks, he actually touched me. The other guys sort of watched out for me, after Howarth did this to me, they pulled him off and spoke to him. These marks and bruises are all down to Howarth. The others were silent, but kind to me and they stopped him hitting me. I really need to change I smell and it's really uncomfortable." We arrive at the hospital and they show me into a small room. The nurses are busy taking care of me when Ben crashes through the doors.

"Thank God you're here, you're alive thank God, thank you, thank you all." He threw himself on the bed. I'm in his arms and he has me in a death grip. "These have been the longest three days of my whole life. I should have remembered the watch thing straight away, but everything at the hotel was stolen, laptops, phones and I just forgot in all the excitement. When you didn't turn up for any of the meet and greets, I was worried. I got back to the rooms and they were trashed with things missing, I thought we had just been robbed." I tell him to shush and I'm fine and here and alive. He tells me everything Agent Lawson has already told me, but I listen as he cries hugs me, kisses my head and hugs me tighter.

"Pippa hadn't arranged to meet you, you were set up and then I panicked and rang to speak to the people dealing with this fraud crap, they put me in touch with Agent Lawson here and his team. I've been thinking the worst things possible, because I thought you were dead, but what have they done to your pretty face? They'll pay for that. Did they touch you Penny?"

"No, that was planned for the weekend. I'm fine really, I'm just a little shaken, wet, hungry and pissed off. Next time I jog in the park, not on the street running around it."

"Next time you go, you go with fucking armed guards. Four big arsed mother fuckers, nobody's hurting you like this again." He's sobbing into my chest. I hold him as the relief that we are both safe washes over us.

Two hour later and I'm allowed home. Hart's in custody, he was caught as he exited the brothel. I will be having words with Mr-I-Don't-Sleep-Around. The rooms are clean and back to normal, I head for the bathroom and run a bath. Ben sits and watches as I peel the hospital gown off and climb in the bath, telling Ben to throw away the bagged clothes I'd had on for days, perhaps even burn them, anything just get rid of them, I never wanted to see them again. I've a few bruises and my headaches. Poor Ben has been so quiet since the hospital.

"Ben, please talk to me tell me what is worrying you? Do you want to tell me something? Please Ben, talk to me." He strips and gets in the bath with me. He doesn't ask, he just does it, and he holds me tightly and breaks down.

"You were missing, and it was my fault. I've died over and over again since Wednesday. I thought my life was over before it had even begun. I never want to be away from you again, you go where I go from now on, everywhere and all the time. When they told me, were you we're being held, I thought they had taken you to use like the girls they brutalised in there. I threw up over Agent Lawson's shoes, when he mentioned the address.

Hart had me go there with him, just the once, to see what he could offer me in the way of having sex, no string's sex, however, whoever and as many as I wanted. He said all my problems were because I needed to screw someone hard and take my frustrations out on anyone in the club. I was shocked and horrified. I thought he was taking me for a meal and a night out.

But shit, the things they did in the club were beyond normal, every room a different depravity, in the last room I watched as he actually sodomized a young girl, him and another man and she loved it but hell it made my skin crawl for the two seconds I saw them. I really thought they would do that to you; you weren't touched, they said you weren't, you weren't, please tell me you're alright?"

"No, he was waiting for Hart to get there later today. I'm fine really. Ben, I slept for most of it. I feel dirty and need cleaning and I need to get the smell away from me. They have my ring Ben, they stole it."

I cried as he held me tightly as I sobbed hysterically. He picked up the sponge and gently washed me. I could smell the coconut as he washed me, he carefully washed my sore head and hair, rinsing it with the showerhead and kissing my neck when he had finished. I turned around, my legs over his and looked at him, but he couldn't look at me. I held him tightly, and as I did, he kissed my neck. His friend, not so little now, is just asking to be played with. I climb onto his lap and he carefully entered me. As I sat on him, he just held me, we simply held each other and hugged each other for ages, before I began to move slowly on him, with just small hip movements at first, allowing us both time to relax and enjoy it.

He put his arms around me, and began caressing my back, and then leaned down and began kissing my left breast, his lips were hugging my heart. He cried again, and we stopped where we were. His sobs ended when I kissed him. He felt so nice inside me, nothing had been done other than our being together and joined together, it was simple and needed.

I stared into his eyes and he stared back, his arms hold me to him and my arms are around his neck, nothing is said, we are like posed like a statue, the only sound is the silence of the place. I didn't know silence could be so deafening, but it can. Then as I moved my hips around and on top of him, he groaned and caught my nipple in his mouth, already hard and ready for him, he sucked and pulled allowing it to plop free, he did the same with the other, then suddenly holding me tightly he stood up, my legs now tightly wrapped around him, as he climbed out of the bath tub and placing me on the bed gently, he assumed control.

Slowly thrusting in and out of me, I feel the burning building up deep within my core, it build's and it builds, until I feel like I can't take it anymore and I just let go. Then I get multiple earth shattering waves of heaven sent pleasure, it passes through every inch of my body, from my sore head to my wrinkly toes. I completely lose myself under him, in him, with him, and just as I'm thinking my orgasm is over the feelings come again, he's killing me with his none too shabby dick. He eventually groans and drops on the bed next to me, empty and exhausted.

He sleeps soundly, I think for the first time in days, and as he does, he holds me tightly and I hold on to him, as though we're tied together. No words have been spoken, because just being back together was enough, words were not needed, we needed each other, it had been a couple odd couple of hours filled with pure emotion and love, yes, that's what that was love. I slept too...

Chapter 12:

We are woken when we hear a knocking at the door, Ben rushes to get it, telling me to stay in bed and relax. I can't relax when I hear Agent Lawson is in the lounge, so I pull on my robe and join Ben.

"I believe these are yours? They had them in the building, along with this and I believe you will be glad to get this back." I threw my arms around him, taking my ring off him.

"Thank you for the rescue too, I'm sorry I smelled a little and for busting your lip." He smiled, as I flopped on the couch and put my ring back on. "Did you get them all?" I ask as I see my ring again.

"We did, and we now have everyone in custody from his underlings to the top man himself."

"Have they said why they were robbing from their clients? Have they even admitted it?"

"Yes, it turns out Hart has a bad gambling problem, he owed large amounts of money to the wrong people. So, they sent Howarth to recoup their losses and in doing so, Howarth found a way to skim money for them. Hart was oblivious to this until recently. Penny, its way bigger than we first imagined, and there are many thousands of people involved in this, because Howarth and his bosses have been fleecing clients for a long time, and Hart was in trouble long before his father's death. He was only taking nickels and dimes to cover his losses, nothing that could be missed.

Then when Howarth entered the picture, he became the brains behind the mess you uncovered there. He worked for some ruthless people, he was the muscle sent to clear Harts debts and he did. Howarth then realised there was even more money to be made, but for himself and not his boss, so he quit his job with the other folks and started working with Hart.

Officially Howarth, he was made head of security at Hart and Co a year ago, and since then has helped rob all their clients on the books and in every way possible. A few more months, or weeks even and they were getting ready to up and leave, the upcoming new tax season would have been their cue to get out of town and fast, but they seemed to think they needed more money, greed was their downfall that and you Miss Daniels.

They have several offshore accounts, information on which we now have, thanks to the thumb drive Miss Walsh procured. It had all the accounts on there, including passwords and access codes. The clients all shared their accountants and lawyers, and as such they had access to every one of their client's commission accounts and were set to empty them before they left!"

"How did the clients not know something was off? I did."

"Greed, the sportsmen and women pay an awful lot of money to agents and their hangers on, so when Harts offered the best deals and rates of any sports agents, which was all Howarth idea, to give them the lowest commission deals of any of the sports agents out there, and they were on paper, so the new sports players signed on the dotted line thinking they were getting a great deal.

Thankfully it's only been dodgy for the past year, and they are damned lucky to escape with the minimal losses they did, but Hart and Howarth took larger amounts than they stated and covered their dealings well, with charitable donations and every one of their larger clients were funding the same abandoned children's summer camp, and unfortunately for them, but fortunate for us, they used the same template for every one of their thousands of clients, so it was easy to sweep through the client's accounts and shut things down and quickly."

"They kept it simple, so simple that is seemed legitimate?"

"Yes, had you not been called in, come tax session their clients would be poorer to the tune of millions in some cases and all would still owe Uncle Sam his cut."

"Will they get their money back?" I ask.

"Hopefully everyone will be getting back what was stolen from them, minus the correct taxes paid of course, Uncle Sam needs those taxes to pay my wage." He laughed as did Ben, I shuddered, thankfully they did pay his wage, because a good man and his team had found me before it was too late.

"Do you know what they had planned for me, I heard them talk of these plans?" I watch Ben's face and he looks so sad. "Was it as bad as I was thinking?"

"They were planning to have their way with you on camera, because Ben here, he had pissed them off in hiring you, his reward for screwing with them, if you will? And because you had messed with them, they were to sell you in Mexico for use as a prostitute. They were doing what the club is famous for. Howarth's men did all the talking, not wanting to take the heat for the big stuff."

"The men, they didn't do anything to me, they helped me if anything. Don't go too hard on them I had a feeling they would have let me go."

"Penny, they all need to pay for what they did, all of them." Ben is angry, and I guess he has cause to hate them all, he sees it his way, and I see it mine?

"I guess I will never know, but my feelings were Agent Lawson, that they would have stopped it from happening. Ben, the one who needs to pay is Howarth and the man Hart."

"He will, and I will make sure I see him in court. They will pay for every bruise on your body Baby." Agent Lawson smiles.

"I'm glad we got to you when we did, Hart turned up an hour after we left. We timed that perfectly, it was a good job you remembered the conversation. I'm glad you're safe Miss Daniels and if you need me for anything, please ring. Nice to meet you Lordie, my boy is a huge Yorkers fan. Me? I'm Mets all the way, sorry." I smile as Ben brings through a whole pack of things for Lawson's son and signs them all. The photo he signs, 'Sam, you have an amazing Dad to keep you safe, see you anytime at the ballpark, Lordie.' He leaves us to it and I just sit and look at my ring.

"I don't suppose you did all the visits and meet and greets, did you?"

"I did everything that was on the list you left with Trudy, thanks."

"You said you were taking me out to celebrate our engagement, and I feel like going out and letting off steam and throwing a bottle or two of Jack at the paparazzi, fancy joining me Ben?"

"If you look in the wardrobe Milady has a nice dress to wear. I'll call down and get you booked in for hair and make-up, they may be able to do something to hide the mess that that bastard made of your face. I'll kill him the first chance I get. As to the throwing the bottle of Jack, I'll have you know I'm a reformed hapless, lovesick sap." He phones down to the salon.

"So, you are Mr Lord. So, you'll no longer be requiring my services then?" He rushes over, picks me up and kisses me.

"I need you even more now and we have a wedding to plan, a new contract to sort and you have to meet Mom and the girls. I need your services Penny, and all the personal servicing I can get off you, and for many years more. Come on they are waiting for you." He followed me down and sat waiting, whilst the girls worked their magic. He never left my side and grimaced when they touched the very bad swelling and bruised area.

"That looks perfect thank you so much, you can hardly tell apart from these." I show my wrists to Ben who looks down. "Ben, stop it at least I'm here. These will fade and disappear in no time. I'm safe and not going anywhere." He takes my hand and we get in the lift back to the room. He showers, and I go to change. The dress is beautiful, a black, one shoulder fitted Vera Wang dress, this feels so nice. God I've to go commando, as it shows every line of my body, it trails to the floor in soft body hugging lines. Ben comes in as I put on the last shoe and zips me up.

"It fits you like a glove. I'm so lucky having you back." He ran his fingers down the sheer silky satin of the dress, sending a raging wave of chills through my body. Kissing the bare shoulder, he left me to get dressed. He came out of the dressing room looking fantastic and definitely hot. The smile was back on his face as he held me tightly.

When he finished hugging my backside, he presented me with a plush blue velvet box and as he opened it, I looked in and as I did he did the damn pretty woman thing, laughing and shutting the box lid in my fingers, just as I was fingering the beautiful pearl and diamond necklace, complete with earrings and bracelet. I should have seen that coming. I laugh at the cheesy things he does to cheer me up, but that one was a killer.

"These are welcome home gifts, I wanted to get you something nice, do you like them? I don't do this, buying gifts thing very well." His nose nuzzled my neck, as he fastened the necklace. They looked lovely; he had bought them, and I loved them. He kisses the mark on the wrist before he fastened it. His touches are both gentle and soft and he's sending feelings to a certain uncovered area of my body. I groaned as his hands went for a wander caressing my backside and he grinned.

"Going commando under Vera? Very, rude Milady. I think I'll have to find a way of punishing you later, though I could look at an instant punishment now, but we can't because we are going to be late and I need the punishment to be long and wet." I put the last earring in and grabbed my bag.

"Wet, as in a bath, shower or both? That's not a punishment that's a torture." He pulls me in for a kiss.

"No as in multiple orgasmic crashes Baby, I want you wet between the legs, but doing it in that dress it would be impossible to do, without you needing to change." I giggle as his hand sweeps up the front of the dress. Wow.

"I can't wait Ben, but really, do we have to go out?" I whine.

"Umm, we have a press conference to give and then I'm taking Milady for dinner, and a dance or two and then back here for dessert." I umm into his kisses, I may need to change my dress.

"Thank you for today, everything was fantastic. I'm glad I'm here with you I thought I would be dead." He pulled out a handkerchief and wiped my eyes.

"Welcome to my world Baby, for the past three days it's been a living nightmare. Carrying on as though everything was fine and wanting to rip every fucker's head off, everyone and everything seemed to piss me off, but Thomas kept my spirits up by texting me every hour asking, is she back yet? Trudy said you'd worked so hard on the meetings and I'd not to let you, myself or the children down and it's got to be said, every single one was fantastic. I didn't want to let you down." He gave me a gentle kiss on the lips as the doors opened.

"Can you dance Ben? Please tell me you can dance?" I wanted to lighten the mood.

"Four sisters and Mom, what do you think? I always had to dance with one or all of them, they used me as their own personal bitch. I swear, if it wasn't dancing, it the chick flicks, setting me up on dates with their friends or shopping. Sometimes I feel like their fifth sister. I know more about bras, panties, periods and babies than I ever care to mention." I giggle, and he leads me out into a flash of cameras. Ben gives them his one and only interview.

"Ben, how does it feel to have Penny back? How are you doing Penny? Why you? Do you know why they kidnapped you? Did they hurt you? When is the wedding?" I hold on to him tightly as he speaks.

"I owe a great debt of gratitude, to the police force of New York City, the FBI, in particular Agent Lawson and his team, and the whole team who helped rescued my fiancée from her horrific ordeal at the hands of a group of desperate criminals. I feel so very lucky she's here with me again and safe. It's made me realise just how much she means to me. I want to thank also the thousands of people, fans and friends for your support and the good luck messages, as you can see, I'm taking my baby to dinner to celebrate our engagement, as to the wedding? It will be soon, and in my hometown, a small, private family affair so again, thank you." He had his hand at the dip in my back and moved me towards the car with speed and grace. The door was opened by the driver and he dashed around to the other door, telling the driver to get us out of dodge.

"So, we're getting married in your hometown, when Ben?"

"Actually no, were getting married in Las Vegas and tomorrow. The party is for family and friends and is next Saturday."

"We are getting married tomorrow and you're just thinking to tell me this now? Ben what are you like? Ben, what about the dress, where have you picked, who is coming, oh please tell me it's in the drive through?" Laughing at me again, well at least he looks happier than he has done all day.

"Just us two, yes pick a drive through and there's plenty of them and plenty have been in movies, it will take us longer to get the paperwork done at city hall. There was another dress in my closet, I haven't seen it, but I believe Vera makes nice wedding gowns too, oh and Jimmy Choo does a nice white shoe." I am gob smacked and stunned, as we pull up to the coach house again. I smile, no, we're not having froufrou, no not tonight.

"Driver can you please take us to the Steak House, the one in Brooklyn I believe is nearer, thank you? Sorry Ben, I need proper food and we may be a little overdressed though. I need steak, potatoes and the whole kit and caboodle."

"Milady has great taste in food, I love that place. I just didn't think you would?" I had a hand running up and down my back.

"I love plain food, froufrou's fine for a snack, but you're not telling me the meal at the last place filled you up, not a growing boy like you?" He leant over and nibbled at my neck.

Our meal came and what a meal. Yes, we looked a little strange and we are definitely overdressed for a steak place. I loved it, proper food and the size of the steak, now there was a challenge. It wasn't going to beat me, and I put up a good fight too, but lost. Perhaps the baked potato, the onion rings and the sodas I drank, were just a side order too far? I lost that round, the side of beef the victor. Ben watched as I ate, I was a little hungry, having not eaten since Wednesday.

"It's nice to see a woman eat, I'm glad you're enjoying it." I couldn't eat another mouthful. As Ben and I discussed the meet and greets he'd done, telling me of the way the children always made him feel better, but the best trip was to watch the vets do a charity baseball match, which he said he would have loved me to see, he sighed. "If anything had happened to you Penny, I don't know what I'd have done if they..." He stammered. He did not need to know how close Howarth came, to doing more. Had the men not been there he would have. "...It made me realise you are the only one for me, and I never want to be away from you again, and I'm never going to leave you." I wiped his tears. He smiled and kissed the palm of my hand as I did.

"I missed you too, and you were what kept me strong, the thought of getting back to you. I was afraid when I was awake, so really sleeping away the time was sort of blessing. Howarth, when he said he was going for you, it frightened me. Then the cloth, it sent me to sleep, so I thought of you and hoped you were safe." He shushed me, telling me I was safe, and he would always look after me.

With dinner finished, I was too full for dessert, to which Ben reminded me we could have when we got back to the apartment. I blushed as his hand held my sex in his hand, I feel so naughty sat at the table being turned on by my man. He then ordered a cab to take us dancing. Waiting outside for it, we were suddenly hassled by paparazzi, but this time they were right in our faces, and by the time the cab came, Ben was wound up looking after me. The last thing he needed was them pushing me, and I am being pulled and pushed hard too. As the cab came one of them shouted something that rocked Ben's very core.

"How long has your mother got? Is that the reason why you're rushing the wedding because your mother is dying Ben?" I push him in the cab through the open door, before I climbed in at the side of him, his fist was clenched, and he shook. I just sat and waited for him to say something, but nothing was said, there was just the tight fist, and silence.

"Take us to the Plaza Hotel, please driver." He looked out of the window, not saying a word, we had a very silent ride to the hotel. We're met there by yet more pond suckers. He marched straight past them, leaving me to walk by them alone, so much for never leaving my side and keeping me safe? Hell, he was angry, and I figured it was me he was angry at. They ask me about his move to the LA Lions, was it because of his mother, when were we planning to go, did we plan to hold the wedding soon, how much time did she have left? I was panicking and frightened as they pushed and jostled me, I was on the verge of tears when Frank came and walked me past them.

"Thanks for that Frank, did he go straight up?"

"No Ma'am, he's in the bar and he asked that you go to the room and pack." I thanked him and went to see Ben. He just glared at me. What was I supposed to have done?

"I asked you not say anything, to anyone Penny and for a reason, Mom didn't know. She will now. Look at the fucking television. I'm abandoning the New York Yorkers, to join the Lions on Monday, to be near my dying mother, why did you say something. Just go and pack your things Penny leave. Leave, before I do something stupid. Like marry you."

"Ben, I didn't..." He shook his head and told me to shut up and pack, again. My heart was cut in two with his hurtful remarks.

"...Go now Penny, what we had is over, because I needed to trust you and I can't ever trust someone who would betray me like you did."

"I...I... I didn't Ben, I didn't." I was a wreck and speechless, he was being so cruel and mean, he was being horrid.

I stood for what seemed like an eternity, in all actuality, it was minutes of hate filled moments. I turned and headed for the lift. I packed alright, taking everything of mine and leaving everything that he had bought for me in the room. The ring, the dresses and the jewellery. As I removed the ring from my hand I cried as I placed it back in the box, I couldn't marry someone who thought I would lie to them. Who hated me, who made me as angry as I was at that moment in the bar, still I waited for him to come back to the room, but he didn't show-up! I waited two hours, so I went in search of him, because I wanted to talk, but would he still be drinking? I needed a room of my own, to think about things. I went towards reception to book a room for a couple of nights.

As I did, I passed the bar, bugger me, he was still gracing with his presence, glass in hand and a tight ass in the other, with a couple more girls around him and other people were with him. He was preening, he was holding court and he had another woman's arse in his hand, the arse. I'd found him alright, he was with another woman, she had her arms around him, and he didn't care that I was watching and yes, he saw me. He carried on hugging her arse. I ran back to the room and fired up the laptop, I booked the first flight back to London, for five thirty in the morning. I ordered a car to take me there later. Then I wrote him a letter ending whatever it was we had.

Ben, I would never, ever betray a client, let alone never the man who I truly loved and one whom I thought, stupidly as that now seems, loved me back with the same amount of trust. The fact you did what you did and said what you said proves we are not suited, to love nor marriage, all the things you said and were done by you, were and are unforgivable. Please for your mom's sake, don't throw your chances of going back home away, as you did me, this chance is the only one you have, and you threw away the only chance we had Ben, with your actions in the bar.

'What if someone you met, someone you saw, someone you knew was the only someone for you?'

Well, you were that person for me Ben, you and only you. Goodbye, and don't come and try to find me, when you realise it, that I did not break your trust, because you won't know where to look, not when I don't want to be found. I really hope you find your answers Ben, but it was not at the bottom of the glass, you held tonight, nor with the arse, you held in the other. I'm resigning from your life, as manager, fiancée and friend. Goodbye Penelope Daniels.

I sat and waited in the room, losing my temper. Sod it I went down to sort it out. The girl behind the bar told me he had gone to the girl's room and he looked happy when he left, carrying her to the lift. That car couldn't now arrive soon enough, on hearing that little nugget, I stormed back upstairs for the last time. Grabbing a drink from the fridge, I sat in the dark as the clock slowly ticked, the hands didn't seem to want to move around and when they did, I swear they were going backwards. I poured another and downed it quickly. The brandy warmed my throat as I poured another and another. Still he didn't come, but the hands on the clock moved slowly as the brandy warmed me. Great, I was now leaving New York with a hangover.

Eventually the phone rang, and my ride was here, and Ben still hadn't come back. I'm all packed and helped by Frank into the car, who told me Ben had just left the hotel. I climbed in the cab and went to the airport. I think part of me wanted him to follow me. I wanted him to come and get me, but he didn't. Even as I checked in, I just wanted to grab my bags and go back, sit it out and wait for him to come back, but he saw me in the bar, he had his hands on her and he had gone to her room, which was so very, very wrong.

What did I expect? I didn't even know him! He was just a beautiful stranger I'd had an amazing adventure with, a mad crazy adventure. I drank soda and waited for the call to board, which when it came didn't seem to take as long as I thought. I didn't even put on the laptop or turn on the phone. I just sat and stared out the window. Sleeping most of the way home on the plane. I grabbed a cab to my parent's house and unloaded the bags. Letting myself in I flopped on the couch feeling empty and lost, Dan came down the stairs half-asleep and looked shocked to see me.

"You're getting married today, did you forget Lady P?" I explained everything. Even the lush at the bar, whose arse he had in his hand.

"He only told me and you about his mother, so he presumed it was me, and that's what hurt that he didn't trust me enough. Ben, you know me, I would never ever betray a client's trust ever, but then again, I don't sleep with clients either. I won't be making that mistake again. I need a bath and my bed and then I'm off. Off for a couple of months of doing something I have always wanted to do, a driving tour of Europe. I'm going to drive and with no particular place to be and for as long as I want. Spend time on just me and get my life back. So, I'll be requiring the custody of my car keys please, Lexi is alright, isn't she?"

"She's a great car Lady P. Give him some time; he's a complicated guy and he really will be regretting this when he wakes up." I frowned

"He will be regretting whom he wakes up with, but for now I just need to sort myself out. Where is Suzie Q?" He laughed.

"Oh, don't worry about her she's on her merry way to your non-wedding. She will be so pissed off." He laughed but I didn't, and I knew she would be hacked off with me.

I fired up the laptop and checked my emails yep, there were loads from Suzie asking where I was and that everyone was looking for me and Ben was frantic. I sent a simple email back, saying that I was at home. I would be in touch, when I knew what I was doing and not to worry about me I was a big girl who had to grow up. As for Ben, he had his chance and threw it in my face with the tart he had his hands on. See you when I fix my shattered heart. I'll be gone, when you get back.

SQ wants to chat] ...

SQ is typing]. Don't do anything rash, wait until I get back.

Me]. Too little and too late, I will be long gone when you get back, bath and then off to Europe for a couple of months, just me and Lexi. Tell him not to fuck up all his hard work and to make sure he gets the job; his mum will need him more than ever. I hit send.

SQ is typing]. Please wait Penny Lane, don't rush off, wait for me to get there, this has all been a big mix up. It was all a mistake.

Me]. Sorry, too late my minds made up. If Ben is there, tell him thanks for a wild adventure, he would have been the one who played Sam. I may even see him again someday, but it won't be anytime soon. I never wanted to fall in love ever, because I knew my heart would ache when he broke it, and it is, he broke it and into a gazillion unfixable pieces. What he did to me and accused me of, what he told me to do, all those things were all unforgivable, goodbye Suzie. See you when I get my heart and head fixed. When it is, and only then, I'll come back. I hit send and closed the screen.

I left my laptop, iPad and phone in my room taking just my iPod for company. I grab a shower and pack a small case for winter and a case for spring. I'm in no rush to get back, none at all. I'm going to be a wild roaming gypsy, spending some time on me and try getting my head around the crazy week, a week where I lost my heart, found my soul mate and lost him.

"Right I'm off Dan and tell Suzie not to panic, I know she's phoned, and I know he's phoned too. I'm a big girl and I'll send postcards and phone her. I'm not talking my phone or laptop. Just my iPod, I want a break. I'll keep in touch and Danny good luck." I gave him a hug and set off on my heart-mending trip. First stop the bank, I needed euro and to tell them I would be in Europe for the near future. Then on next to the garage for a check over, and to disable the in-car tracker, with that done, Lexi and I are good to go too.

Chapter 13:

I decided on taking the Eurostar to Paris, instead of the ferry, it was quicker, and I was not in the mood for sea travel, and so with my fees paid, I bought a single ticket and damn it I paid by card, cash from now on Penny. Three hours later and I'm in Paris, and my first post card is sent when I get fuel for Lexi. The satnav is programmed for Dijon, it is an excellent mustard place I hear! I laughed as I programmed it in. I drive for a while and decide on stopping overnight in Avalon, in a farmhouse, come hotel, come restaurant, for the evening, as I was a tad tired. I was fluent in French so had no problems speaking the lingo. I will be fine on my own, perhaps that's all I need, some me time? I cried myself to sleep, wondering why I had been such a fool?

Waking the next day, not feeling too great, lack of sleep and tear-soaked pillows can do that, it can and does leave you exhausted. I woke to the smells of fresh baked bread, then the smell of the country, the sharp winter smell, so clean and fresh wafted through the open curtains. I was so stupid, why was it hurting, after all I'd told myself that New York was where I needed to lose it and I did. I have to move on. I shower and change, then go down for breakfast.

I sit alone eating a wonderful selection of fresh baked breads and homemade jams, this was just what Penny ordered, me time, I love this already. The people are friendly and two are on their honeymoon, I sigh, I should be married too by now, damn him. I paid my bill for the nights stop and off I go, Mr Eric is serenading me in Lexi, as the French countryside passes me by. What do I do, where will I go? All questions I repeatedly ask myself as I drive.

Arriving in Dijon, I booked into a remote farmhouse for four nights. I would walk, run and eat, this was I decided, to be a pattern for however long it lasted, for however many weeks or months it took to complete my journey. I'd drive for five or six hours, then book a room in a quaint bed and breakfast, photograph the sites of interest, village life and football stadiums, read books, walk, do a run, eat an evening meal and do it all over again.

In Dijon, I'd bought a camera, an all-singing and dancing one, with all the lenses and everything to kick start my old hobby, but I'm sorry to say it's a digital one, new school, not old school photography. I also bought five memory cards, as I had no laptop to upload to, and it will be a great deal of work when I get back, doing that, whenever that is. Ergo, I began my gypsy lifestyle. I had a nice time in Dijon. Where I couldn't wipe the bad things going on in my life.

I soldier on, from there I headed to Orleans, because I wanted to see the impressive Orleans Cathedral, the cathedral that is probably most famous for its association with Joan of Arc, the Maid of Orleans, she's very big here for some reason? My eyes feasted on the many beautiful French renaissance buildings, the chateaus, the bridges. Most of which I now had jogged over and had photographs of. Again, I chose to stop in a small farmhouse bed and breakfast places.

No posh hotels for me and only withdrawing money from cash points when I left the town where I was staying. Deciding too, that three or four days in any one town or village would be long enough. I would also pick up local football shirts for Thomas and from everywhere I visited. I had my hobbies to keep me occupied, photography, running, reading, football jersey collecting and shoe hunting, it was bliss.

From there I headed for Lyon and I visited the Basilica of Notre-Dame de Fourviere, I feel a very ecclesiastical trip maybe on the cards, as I seem to spend lots of time in churches, perhaps I'm praying for some sort of divine intervention? Perhaps Mum and Dad will come and tell me that this was all my fault, and it was all I deserved for giving him that part of me and my heart along with it, why did they not teach me anything useful, like I don't know, knitting? More photos are taken, my new old hobby is giving me solace.

The city shone bright at night and I captured some wonderful photos of the old buildings. No matter what I do though, I cannot get him out of my mind, he is always in my thoughts. I would hear an American tourist, with that accent of his and turn to see if he had found me, he never did. The more places I visited, the more involved in the photographs I became, the photographs I'd taken really were fantastic. I even thought of doing a travel book, who knows it may be good?

When I was leaving a place, I'd stop, and I made a short phone call home, just to let Suzie Q know that I was alive and well. When I first called Suzie, she begged me to come home and to fly back to a distraught Ben, the phone was put straight down, if she mentioned him and in the following calls, the same thing happened. I was still hurting, so she stopped asking in the end. From Lyon, I said goodbye to France and said hello to Italy.

My first stop here was Turin, where my tour of Italy would begin. I stayed a whole week here, there was so much to see, and I photographed plenty more churches too. I had a night at the opera and as I dressed to impress with my fabulous new ball gown, I sat in the box and flipped the glasses over, a Julia Roberts moment. I too pissed my pants as I watched La Traviata. I sang the drinking song quite loudly and yes cried yet more tears.

I'm taking in the sights and tastes, I eat well too, and my appetite for fresh pasta is amazing, pig like almost. Juventus is a must-see thing for young Thomas and as I grab the required jersey and snap the stadium. I sit and weep in the bloody seats alone, my mind is in turmoil today and I have yet another Ben headache. I am given a tissue by a passing mum, her six boys are running wild running up and down the seats, itching to run on the grass. She smiles and tells me it will all be alright. Do I look that down?

"Grazie, avete le mani occupate." She smiles and in English answers me back.

"Yes, my hands are full six boys, their father and their love of football, I must be mad, but they are worth it. Men don't know they're born, beer, sports and sex, it's all they seem to think about." I laugh, as it's all I think about too now. I smile and bid her a fond farewell, they too are on an Italian football stadium tour, poor woman.

I am going to Milan next, wow I get to shop, and yes, there's shoes to be had and I do shop too, lots of pretty dresses bought because I had to have them. Then I head to Verona, and yes, I looked up Eric's lady here, and agreed with the lyrics of his song, there are indeed great places to eat and drink, the haunting lyrics of the song stung my eyes. I sang along as the song played on my iPod.

'I fell in love with a lady from Verona. She's just as sweet as she can be. All of her life she's been a loner, because she likes to stay so free. Out of all of the things, they make in Italy, the clothes, the cars, the wine, the food, I love my lady from Verona, because she made me feel so good, but it wasn't meant to be, I had to find out the hard way. You know, what she gave to me I'll treasure until my dying day, and I would not have it any other way.

That damn song was how I was feeling. I'm so emotional and I try to keep calm and carry on forgetting about Ben, but it wasn't working? No matter how I kidded myself, that it was, it really wasn't. So I'd decided that I needed more time and more miles under my belt. Next, I'm off down the boot of Italy, to Bologna for more photos of buildings and piazzas and oh the markets. I love the food, then we travel down the boot further to San Marino, stopping overnight in several places in between the larger towns and cities.

I seem tired and I may be a little lonely, I'm such bad company. I cry, I sleep, I jog, I read and like a robot I carry on doing the same things over and over again. I head to Foggia, on to Bari, then I land in Taranto, I cut a whole bottom shoe from my trip to Italy, skirting over then to Naples. I did wonder about staying in the villa I have here, but I haven't been there since Suzie and I stopped there for a summer whilst in Uni. I really must sell it. I stick to the plan and do what I've been doing, trying miserably to get him out of my bloody head, damn him. Then I don't know why, perhaps I'm boring of my own company, or I need a change, so I head to a top-class hotel, for a couple of days.

I do need to be pampered and room service is needed, and some of my clothes need cleaning, and I'm running out of undies and God forbid I did that. I booked in a great hotel here, The Hotel Excelsior for one night only, if only to get my underwear done. I pampered myself rotten and had soothing back massages and had my hair done, such a treat, it needed it too, this is the longest I have ever stayed away from a hairdresser and the longest time between using hair irons and hairdryers.

I look like a cavewoman as I entered the salon, though I look quite respectable when I get out, and I'm back to feeling human. I dined in a posh pizza place, nothing like Mikes and as I eat the vegetarian here, I cry again, small stupid things remind me of him. Damn the stringy cheese. My washing done, I should have bought new for what it cost me, but hey, they all came back in their own posh little bags, those small things do make me laugh, I'm going mad. I need the hustle and bustle of tourists and where better than Rome.

I head there for another whole week, because here I had a multitude of bucket list films to honour, 'Eat Pray Love,' 'Roman Holiday,' with Miss Hepburn and Gregory Peck, yes, a good romantic film. I ate my lunch on the Spanish Steps too. 'Three Coins in a Fountain' and yes, I threw my two euro in the Trevi Fountain, using the right hand over the left shoulder, as it was done in the film. I can't be messing my love life up, yeah right, I'd done that already, but I wished for love, and then went to eat, this place is a tourist Mecca, and I did the whole thing too.

My bucket list requirements are being filled. A few more churches are photographed, and I head to the Coliseum too, my gladiator Russell, did not make an appearance, but my dinner did, up chucking where thousands of gladiators did battle, great. I despite feeling lousy, I really enjoyed that week because it was very different and very touristy.

Then on to Florence. I'd had ten wonderful weeks of sun and sights seen, and then I got a little bit of good news here, hell some wonderful news, and I had no one to share it with, was that my fault or his? I decide his. Genoa next, then along the coast, because I decide on stopping in Monaco, and bugger me stupid, how I loved Monaco. This tiny principality had Lexi and me doing our very own Gran Prix. I loved it.

Everyone who came here did just that, they raced around the circuit, then I take photos of the fabulous yachts, and boats tied alongside the expensive marina there. Wow, there were plenty of money people here, here I splashed out and paid for two nights in the Hotel de Paris, where I played poker and gambled. I won thirty euro, so I didn't quite break the bank. I relaxed on the roof top terrace and get in some sun, its warm and though not baking, I feel healthy and happy for the first time in quite a while.

Thomas's football shirt collection was ever growing, and they were now in their own box, in the boot of Lexi. My memory cards are full, so more are purchased along with an old school camera, yes at last proper film. I enjoyed old school photography, my father and I once shared two loves, he started me on them both, photography and skating. I packed my bags again, and after Miss Lexi was serviced, we headed out again. Along the coast to Nice: I follow the coast to Cannes, Toulon, Marseilles, Avignon, Nimes, Montpelier, Barcelona, Valencia, Seville, Lisbon, Porto, Bilbao, Bordeaux, where I bought some nice wine. It would be rude not to, then Nantes, Rennes, Caen. I really am a travelling nowhere sort of a minstrel, and still the man is here in my darned head all the darned time.

Whether it is a conscious decision or not, I head to Le Havre to catch the ferry home, I was actually now fed up of driving and of my own company and still missing the idiot that had stolen my heart and caused me so much pain and anguish. Shit this being in love is bloody hard work and lord I'm tired and in need of something, that I'm not getting from driving around Europe. I decide that enough is enough, and that driving around Europe wasn't all I imagined it to be.

I have a mess in my boot, that is weeks of living in hotels and bed and breakfast places fault. I have carrier bags and boxes of accumulated crap, all in my boot, so I decide to head home. I drive along the coast road to Calais and I stop in hotels along the last of the French coast. Finally, I get to Calais for the ferry home, where I flipped a coin, heads for home, tails I continue up to Germany. So, after twenty weeks of blissful scenery and the quite of the churches, my head is rested in part, tormented in others and my body relaxed with many days of sunshine, good food, thought the company was lousy and miserable at times. I do hate my own damned company.

I'm finally headed for home, after a few wheel changes, plenty of fuel stops and a couple of services of my fantastic travelling companion. I drive my Lexi onto the ferry and head home to face the wrath of Suzie Q. My thoughts were still no clearer, about the wonderful stranger who gave me so much, in such a short time, but was the same stranger who, at the same time made me so angry, sad and confused and then the tears start again. God the tears were always falling, all because of bloody Benjamin Lord.

The white cliffs at Dover are coming into view. I snap the wondrous site and I then realise, I'm almost home. I'm feeling like Dorothy, if I snap my heels together three times and say, there's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place like home, I will be home, but where for me is that? Home is where the heart is, and mine was broken and in pieces in New York. I drove home. The place felt empty, and not like my home, it had stopped being that all those years ago, now it was just a dumping ground for my old life, what was I to do first?

The dining room wall was full of postcards, and when I saw them all spread out, I realised we'd travelled to a hell of a lot more places than I'd remembered. I'd gained too, a small bag full of memory cards, full of photos and several old school films needing to be developed. With my bags and boxes unloaded and the first of many loads of washing in, I then head to my room. It looks different, someone had been routing through my things. I look around and the boxes are opened, but nothing looks to have gone, perhaps they were looking for a clue as to where I had gone? You have to love spare of the moment, if I didn't know where I was going, then nobody else would either.

I start uploading the films to the laptop, each one is numbered, and I have cards full of photos and I am down to my last one. They are all downloaded, and all transferred to an external drive it's wonderful to see the photos, and the thousands and thousands of images. I phoned Suzie Q, when she hadn't come back for lunch.

"We are in bonny Scotland, is the weary traveller stopping until we get back tomorrow, we have things to discuss?"

"I've some good news to tell you too. I will see you when you get home. When will you be home and where is Dan, did you throw him out or kill him?"

"That's my news Penny, we got married up here today. Don't say anything, it just happened, I broke one of your cardinal rules don't sleep with a client. What's your news Pen?" I was still reeling that Danny and Suzie were married.

"Nothing as good as that anyhow congratulations. I'll see you both, tomorrow, I've loads of pictures to show you, from a lunatic abroad tour. I'm thinking of doing Australia, in their spring next. Right see you later." I'm for want of a better word gobsmacked at her news.

I flipped to my in-box and it's full, it would take me ages to sift through the junk mail, but there were loads from Facebook notifications, I opened the first one, Ben was now an LA Lion, the deal had gone through then? Those notifications are deleted, as I didn't need them. I deleted all the ones from Meridian too, all begging me to return to them, nope, never in a million years. I don't need the hassle that life brought me. There are several from Mr De Witt the most recent sent just four days ago. I opened the first one and they wanted to know where to send payments to, I emailed him back and told him any and all payments were to go to the children's centre I'd visited back in January, I didn't need nor want the money. I save all those to drafts.

The next ones are from the Lions, wanting to discuss Ben's contractual obligations? Why? Had he told them that I was still his manager, when I wasn't? They were aware I had commitments in the Europe and the U.K and would appreciate me dealing with his contract as soon as possible and that his temporary contract was only good for another week and then they would need a permanent one signing. I sigh. Shit, I left him in the lurch with that. Damn it I needed to sort that out as soon as possible. Then there are the ones I was dreading most, and they are page after page, and they are all from Ben.

Most just two words, forgive me. I delete it hundreds of times, explanations delete, regrets delete, sadness delete, loss delete, love delete, pain delete. After an hour of deleting, I felt crap, sad and full of bloody tears again. I knew I shouldn't have opened any of them. Why did I still love the big lurk of a man who broke my heart? I still did, and I don't know why I did?

Then there were those from Thomas, I opened those with a happier heart, and it was great he loved living in England he loved his school, his Aunty Pip had dogs, ponies and a whole farm full of animals, he sent me pictures. He was such a different happy boy. I emailed him back I would come and see him tomorrow and that I had bought him football shirts from every town, city and country that I had been in and photos of the stadiums that I'd taken for him.

All sent in one file for him to download. After a quick email to Suzie Q, to tell her I was driving to see Thomas in Edenfield, and would be back the day after, I was stopping in Manchester overnight and driving back. Then I get back to deleting other mail, then one hits me, it's from Fran, Ben's sister. Eleanor had taken a turn for the worse at the weekend and suddenly I'm doing the stupidest thing I've ever done...

I cancel the trip to see Thomas, telling him I'll be back to see him when I get back from LA, and I'll send him the package by courier. I box them all up into two big boxes and sent them by overnight courier to his address. I enclose a note saying I will see him soon, and if Ben has not sent him his new kit, I will see to it he has one delivered. I write a note for Suzie, telling her I now have my laptop, phone and iPad, I'll be back after a trip to see a friend who is ill, really last minute, can't be helped sort of thing.

I pack my bags, summer clothes this time. I change into the prettiest of my dresses and shoes. My hair is done and straightened to perfection. I hadn't touched it with an iron in weeks, as it's been in hair bobbles most of the time. It looks great and sun bleached. I've a healthy tan because the roof was down a lot in the past few weeks, not too shabby Penny, I thought as I headed off.

I grab my bag and passport and I leave a note for Dan to get Lexi serviced for me and tracker is to be put back on, leaving the keys I set off, I don't have a choice. I need to see Eleanor before she gets too ill, so I'd booked my tickets and headed off and I'm in a taxi to the airport. Waiting in the Galleries lounge, I wonder if this is the right thing to do? Yes definitely, I'll deal with the fall out later from Suzie Q, she will kill me, I go online to hire a car using their gold service. It would be waiting for me when I landed, a Cadillac Escalade. I always wanted to drive his car and never got the chance. My flight was boarding. I show my boarding card and get on board and all before I change my mind, it would be easier if I were hung over again and I didn't have these strange and foreign emotions running through my body, but I'm not and I have.

A long flight, which for the most part I sleep through, having driven a fair few miles, in the last twenty-four hours, all with very little sleep had, apart from the nap I took in the bath. Actually, I'd had no sleep since before I set off on the ferry. I'd made up for it now. I awoke just as we were coming into land, it's just after seven at night, local time. With my baggage collected and the car is waiting outside and is signed for. Inputting the coordinates into the Satnav, I head off. Half an hour of riding in a cool car and I pull up outside his mother's home. After asking for the Lord residence, at gate security they note my car registration and let me through, why does he live in Fort Knox? I seem to sit in the car forever. I know it's not, but it just seems like it, my stomach is in knots.

Chapter 13 :B:

I headed into the hotel livid, I phone Dan, and give him hell but he assures me he's said nothing. I couldn't believe it, it had to have been Penny. Fuck, I'd hoped it was his fault, and that he had told someone whilst he was drinking. I ask Frank to tell her to pack her bags, he says he will, and I storm off to the bar. I feel a drink and a hangover coming on. I have never been angrier in my life, the bartender passes me another drink, as she does, I tell her to keep them coming. Penny comes in and I don't know what to say to her, she has betrayed me, hard to imagine, but she has and as we, or rather I row.

I let fly with my temper, telling her to leave before I make the worst mistake ever, marry her. She looks hurt, shit she didn't say anything because the look in her eyes as she left me was one of sheer hurt. I need to calm down though, before I grovel and have to ask her to sort this mess out and bloody apologise and hope she forgives me. I'm a stupid idiot and bad tempered moron too, I have just treated the woman I adore and love, like she was nothing more than a one night stand, shit what did I do?

I've been drinking an hour, perhaps two, when Mom and the girls join me. I haven't the heart to tell them it could off, not yet because Mom is tired, so Eve stops with me and the rest go to their rooms, they are eager to see Penny, I lie and tell them she's sleeping. I need to apologise and grovel a whole lot first. Eve sits with me at the bar, she's quiet, and as we drink, I tell her of Penny's disloyal act, she looks lost as I cry at her betrayal of my trust, normally it's the girls crying.

"Benbo, it wasn't Penny who let the word out, it was Reggie. I told her, and she told Sian, who told her brother, a Lions fan, who sent a tweet to another friend, and that's how the shit hit the fan. Mom isn't stupid either, would you believe that she can use her laptop for things other than farming, building her city's and the other gaming things she has going on in her mini mogul on-line-empires that she's addicted to, oh and playing poker, yup she's a poker addict now. Shock horror Benbo, but she knows all about her condition, she's always known too. Hell, you'll have to eat shit now little brother, she got your wrath for my big mouth, oh hell poor Penny. I need a drink."

I order more and as she cries, I give her a cuddle, as she cries into my chest as I hug my sister, as I do Penny comes down and I look at her and smile. She looks at me with such hate in her eyes, fuck I messed up, and she then flies out of the room, just as Eve throws up, and quite spectacularly so all over herself and the bar, but thankfully she narrowly missed a few of the other guest, who are enjoying a bachelorette party at the bar with me. It's a hell of a turn up all twelve are marrying each other, six lesbian weddings, I'm honoured that they don't hassle me to strip, so I have their tab added to mine, after all this is my own bachelor party. I look down and I'm covered in puke too and great, Eve's crying now... Women...

"Eve, come on stop crying, let's get you to your room. I'm sorry about the mess Jill, is it Jill? Here can you get the cleaners in to clean it and take this for their trouble, I need to get this little lady up to her room." She shrugs her shoulders, says sure and takes the money from me.

I take Eve in my arms to their suites, where Terrie strips her and showers her. I shower in mom's room and I pull on a bathrobe, then sit and talk to Mom. She is excited about the wedding and we chat, I have to tell her what I have done, and she calls me a horse's arse and tells me to go back to the room and hope she forgives me. Heck she always tells me as it is, the advice my mom gives I always take, Moms know best. I go and do it and take the vomit soiled clothes with me and go to our room. The bedroom is in darkness and so I grab some clothes from the hamper and throw in the dirty ones. I have to be getting Suzie from the airport, so I leave Penny to sleep and head to the airport. A cab is taken, as I'm too drunk to drive. I wait an hour for her plane to get in, and as she rushes through the arrivals gate, she flies at me.

A red head, a fiery yet nice looking woman is hurtling towards me. Yes, this is Suzie Q, I am hugged and congratulated, it seems they discuss everything, and by everything. I mean everything, including me and the taking of her friend's virginity. This topic I'm not comfortable talking about, but from what I gleam, this was a big thing for her to give up, and one apparently, she has tried many times to rid her friend of unsuccessfully. I thought my four sisters could embarrass me, but she is worse than they are, but she loves my baby, that much I do know.

"Can we grab a drink Ben? I want to get to know you a little better and then I need sleep, I'm wired tighter than a cog, and keeping this wedding a secret has been a killer from me and on top of the Empire State Building? How bloody romantic Ben, you are a sappy bastard?" I'm shocked and she is a little loud?

"Sure, let's grab one in the bar at the hotel. If we're lucky, they have cleared away the mess Eve left. She was a little sick over the whole place and I may now be banned." We pull up in front of the hotel, the staff have changed, and I needed to thank Frank too damn it. We head to the breakfast bar and Suzie and I order breakfast and drinks; she chats on and on and all I want to do is go and say sorry to Penny. I tell Suzie what I did, and she laughs.

"Ben go up now and apologise, never ever let her sleep on a row. In the morning, she has a completely new row to throw at you, and usually she wins too. So, the moral of the story Ben is, 'never let Penny go to sleep on an argument' now go and sort it, she will be fine, pissed off but fine, you dick." I laugh God she's fiery alright, Penny was correct. I say goodnight and leave her to finish her liquid breakfast, apparently bucks fizz is an acceptable breakfast.

I open the door and go straight to our bedroom, as I climb on the bed, I then realise she's gone, the beds empty and hasn't been slept in. I fling open the blinds and drapes and look around and all her things have been taken, apart from the things I bought her, including her jewellery, which she's left it in their boxes and there too her ring. It's on the unit in the bedroom, shit has she left me? I read the note, the tears still in my eyes and lie on the bed and cry. God I was an utter idiot and a dick. Did she not see the smile as I hugged my sister?

Shit, she didn't know it was my sister, but then again, why would she? I need to find her. I rush back down to catch Suzie before she books into her rooms and as she reads the note she sighs and calls me an idiot. Okay, tell me something I don't know, like where is she? I ask the front desk to phone the hotels nearby and see if she's there. After they assure me, she left and left my room key with them, she then headed for the airport. Frank had put her in a taxi himself, he left me a note telling me the little lady looked ill and sad and her eyes were swollen with tears. Great I have done it this time... I've blown it.

"Suzie, we're heading to yours she'll be there, right? I'm hiring a jet, as we can't be more than a few hours behind her." She agrees and thanking me for a pleasant weekend break in New York. I promise her another visit when we get Milady back.

"If I know Penny she will be sulking in her room and crying, throwing things in the washer, and generally be mad as fuck at you. She will have calmed down when we get there. Get the family to cancel things even you are not Superman and can't get there and back in time for the non-wedding." I look on as she sends email after email, nothing.

I phone Terri, tell her everything and she says to go get her they will be fine, they'll go for lunch and a carriage ride in the park. I make some phone calls and grab my passport. Poor Suzie and I head for the airport again. She is at home and is angry with me, and rightly so too. Suzie sighs in relief at least we know where she is and that she's safe. We are in the air when she sends a request to chat. Penny accepts and is typing away and then she says she's leaving, and she's been cut to the core by my harsh words to her, she is so unhappy and it's all my doing.

The flight is quiet as Suzie sleeps in the bedroom. I send her an email straight from the heart, a letter of apology and hope she reads it and stays there and waits for me, the chat though was quite final, she was leaving and because she knew we were coming, she would be going sooner than she planned. As the plane lands, we go through passport control and head in a taxi to her home.

She has left in her car, just two hours ago. I sigh as we get there, and Dan is waiting for us. She has left, and she has taken her clothes her iPod and nothing else, and everything else is still in her room and after a lecture from both Dan and Suzie. I head to her room and look for clues to where she maybe, as they go out for dinner. I look at her things her photos, her life here and cry, really cry, she has to come back to me, because I really fucked up. I try to sleep and it's impossible, the room smells of her. So I decide on hiring a team to look for her, they get right on it and soon come back with information and I'm not going to like it, she purchased a one way ticket on the Eurostar to Paris. Her card was used last to purchase that, since then nothing she is, they think going to be living below the radar and will be hard to trace, if she doesn't use her cards.

They'll be sending people to tail her and follow her card usage. I agree I need to find her, whatever the cost. I spend the rest of the night looking at photo albums, reading her books, she has some nice one's too, all first editions. Someone loves my baby. I look through her drawers and find chocolate. I eat it because I'm starving and boy, her underwear is sexy, to say the least and bloody hell her shoe collection is massive and expensive and there are a lot of them, these would fill my whole closet at home. I spray the perfume in a big bottle, the one with a rubber white flower on it, it's a pretty daisy and smells of her.

I look under the bed next and there is box upon box, and all filled with films and there are hundreds of them, my sisters will love her. I need to book on the next plane home because I still have to be in LA tomorrow. A quick phone call, the jets ready and I head off, after asking Suzie to phone when she gets anything, phone calls, post cards or messages, because I want her back whatever the cost, she says give her time. Then Dan drives me to the airport in Suzie's car. He gives me the registration number for Penny's car for me to pass on and says good luck with the move. I give him a hug and head back. The flight is horrendous, tedious and long, I sleep for most of it.

When I get back there is no word from the team I have following her trail, but it has only been a few hours. I get a car back and head in to talk to the family; they will kill me for messing this up. I can't change what I said and did, so I have to make the best of a bad situation, feeling crap I head in and without her. How can you miss someone you hardly know? It proves I was right, and she is the one for me and I will have her back, I have to get her back. The girls have packed for me and after an evening of, 'when she gets back, you have to marry her,' yeah right Mom, we head back home, my heart is breaking and if I didn't need to be here I would be in my bed crying like a bitch.

I seem to have spent ages in the air this weekend, but I'm heading to LA and home. The detective team has no news, so I just have to sit and wait. I have been back home a week, and having just signed a temporary contract, they have agreed a month-to-month one for just four months, just until Penny gets back. They are fine as long as they have my signature. It's a tougher contract too and I have to work hard to improve my image, and I have to have weekly meetings to sort out sponsorship deals and payments. It's all way over my head and I wish she were here to sort it out for me.

I have nothing to go back to New York for as the condo there has been sold, packed and shipped back, along with the cars. I finally decide too that I need to buckle down to work here. Mom is happy I'm here, though she is pissed off at me moping around the house. I have a month of actual reports coming in and they figured she only uses her card when she leaves and phone's Suzie at the same time. I have reports every few days and the map of Europe is filled with reports and sightings, I can only sit and wait for her to get back.

Spring training was hard but rewarding, the fans are great and so is my new team. I fit in like I've always been here, that's easy given that I have always wanted to be here. We need to gel and learn to play together, there a few newbies besides me. It's been easier than I thought, and I'm made to feel welcome right away. I have had six weeks of gruelling back to back games, meetings, workouts and more photos of the places she has stayed, they just missed her literally by half an hour, she had Lexi serviced and the guys following her drove there, but they hit the old fork in the road, left for X and right for Y and they choose the wrong road, so I was damned annoyed last night.

My teammates make fun of my imaginary fiancée, as I talk about her all the time. With a few great games under our belt, we are doing great and winning our matches. I like it here and I think Penny will too, I can't imagine her not coming back. The new head of legal has asked for a chat to discuss my contract, so after training I go in to sign the weekly sheets and I almost run out of there, Harriet-Harry-Trent, drunken lush, psycho bitch, ex-friend, ex-bunk up buddy, ex-whatever she thought she was and never was, is sat at her desk and is smiling at me. Holy fucking shit, my life just got fucking worse.

"Good afternoon lover, had a good game? I missed you Honey, where have you been hiding?"

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I shout.

"Imagine my surprise when I got the job here and I find you play here too. Fate is dealing you and I the winning hand babe. I missed you so much."

"We were never an item, we never had anything to miss, whatever we had was over a long time ago." I cringe, how the hell did she get a job here?

"You, naughty boy saying we were through, we're not through babe, until I say were through got that lover? Oh, and I do expect the same services I had before, that's if you want to keep playing here, near your poor Mamma. How are the migraines she has, killing her still?" I wanted to hurl. She was still a fucking drunken crazy arsed bitch. Shit and she knows about Mom too and knows I need to be here. How she can think I would ever go there again?

"Pity, I didn't miss you at all and as to not knowing I'd changed teams, bullshit it was big news, you followed me here. Why you did though is a mystery, because I am happily engaged to a wonderful woman and I mean really happy. You and I were a drunken three week happening, fucking years ago. They were the longest weeks in my life and don't go thinking the one off back in August, was a proposal Harry, that was a drunken, very drunken mistake on my part, and you were wearing a wig to disguise who you were too. Had I known it was you I wouldn't have gone there. Pass me the papers, I need to get home I have a fiancée to phone."

"Argh, the illusive Miss Penelope Daniels. How is she, the woman who's run out on you? I'm here and all this is yours, you just have to say babe, choose me and be safe with Mamma, or don't choose this and its bye-bye-Mamma." I cringe as she circles the desk and comes in for a kiss. I head out of the door and her assistant sees her grope my arse on the way out. The assistant gets the paperwork together and I sign them, all as I scowl at Harriet Trent, the worse woman in my pitifully sorry life, one it now seems I'm working with. How did she get the job, she reeks of whiskey? I sign and head off home.

For weeks she plagues me, bloody weeks and just as I thought she couldn't get any lower in my estimation, she does. I get nightly phone calls to pick my pregnant fiancée up. When she first did it, I ran because I thought it was Penny. Getting there it was just Harry, blind drunk and slurring her words. I put the door attendants straight, she wasn't my fiancée and nor was she pregnant with my child, had she been either, she wouldn't be drinking, not if she was carrying any child of mine. I put her in a taxi and sent her to her hotel, the staff there were paid handsomely to put her to bed nightly and often. How is she doing her job? More importantly, how did she get the bloody job?

I need to see someone as this is getting worse, I get this at least once a week. I have done for the past few weeks too. I need advice and as I can't and don't want to tell the girls, because they would rip her head off, besides Moms not been too well this past week either, her headaches have returned. So I'm panicking about her and it's been twenty one weeks since I last saw my baby, each day, week and month have been an eternity. I soldier on and await news. They say no news is good news, but no news is costing me a fortune.

The two guys following her did it for twelve weeks and came back home. She was right, they couldn't find her, but they still track her card usage and she is still touring Europe. Still buying fuel and drawing out cash and phoning Suzie, but only ever a short conversation of hello I'm fine see you soon, anything more and she puts the phone down. At least she's still alive, I have nightmares all the time, in which she drives off a cliff and I throw up regularly at the thought of her having an accident and nobody knowing who she is.

Pity she doesn't listen to Suzie more, because Suzie would love her to be there when she marries Dan later today. I can't go, because my ball breaker contract doesn't permit me doing anything without fucking Mad Harry signing off on it. One more week and I walk, it's her or me. I'll give the club ultimatum and I don't care whether or not she's the owner's wife's Goddaughter or not, she's screwing with my life daily now. I get home to great news; I've finally heard from the detective I have looking for Penny. She had used her cards to purchase a one-way ticket on a ferry in Calais.

She was heading home, better still she had purchased a plane ticket here and a hire car too, she's coming back to me thank God. Never have I been so relieved to hear that man's voice, especially after months of crappy nothingness from him. I really messed up and Mom is mad as all hell at me hanging around the house, being miserable. She loves me sure, but knows I need a good smack. I got back from training, in a much better mood.

Thomas had emailed me telling me she was coming to see him but is now sending the shirts and coming to America. I'm warned by my adoptive little brother not to mess up this time. I rush back home shower and change. Eve is here stocking the fridge, if nothing else I eat well, my sisters see to it my fridge is full at all times. I've become a boring bastard, sitting at home just waiting for news from the detectives and watching the bloody chick flicks again. Sisters, you have to love them.

"Are you ready to meet Penny? She's flying here and should be here later, she only has mom's address, so I figure she will go there?"

"No shit, she's actually coming here to see you, after what you did to her?" I shrug my shoulders.

"Seems so, she purchased a ticket and is in the air as we speak. I hope it's to come here, I may go to the airport to meet her and give her a lift here, just so I can grovel and beg for her forgiveness, what do you think?"

"I think, no I know, let her come to you. She may be on business here and not coming to see you. She could be over you stud, she may even be here with a new lover?" No. She wouldn't. I hadn't even thought of that, shit if I go to the airport and she's with someone else, I'd kill him.

"If she doesn't come, get the detective on it here in LA, she's using her credit cards again, so you will be able to trace her, she won't be expecting you to know she's here." I agree, and we go to see Mom. I pace the room like an expectant father in the delivery room and mom laughs, as I see a car pull up, I panic, and I feel sick.

"Go and let her in Son, she seems to have been sitting a long while in that car. You really did mess with her head." I go to throw up and whilst in there I hear the doorbell... Hell... Eve... No...

Chapter 14:

Do I go in, or not go in? I hate being like this. There are people inside, I can see them walking past the window. I do a make-up check, do a quick touch up of my lips, they dried out on the plane, then a quick fluff of the hair, so it looks good. I decide to go for it. Here goes nothing, they could shut the door in my face. Hell, why am I here again? Grabbing my bag, I head to the door and I ring the bell and wait. I've got a sudden case of nerves and then a case of chills and I'm shaking. I want to turn and go back to the car.

My back is to the door and I'm just about to hightail it out of there, when the woman whose damn arse he had in his hands is stood before me. Shit, why did I not think? Oh God, I didn't sodding think they would still be together. I have lost him, shit, shit fucking shit, I'm mad, sad and bloody alone, just when I needed him, double bloody crapperty crap, crap, crap. I'm so bloody stupid and now I want to cry again.

"Sorry, I seem to have the wrong address. I'm so sorry for troubling you." I run to get in the car, clicking the automatic door open and I stumble into the seat.

I'd been so stupid. Shit, you're one hell of a stupid woman Penny, but angry doesn't come close to how I feel because he has moved on and left me behind. Just because I hadn't forgotten him or fallen out of love with him, it didn't mean he had the same feelings for me any longer, besides I'd been gone over four months, and he'd been with her a lot longer than me. I breakdown into a sea of tears, not the first I've cried over this, but these hurt more now. I've got my hands in the steering wheel as I cry into them. I grab my bag, and as I look up, he's there at my door smiling. I want to kiss those smiling lips, instead I just stare at him for ages, all red eyed and puffy and all that goodness goes great with a snotty nose. I lower the window and he is there next to the car, as I lean back and yes, I do want the offered kisses, but won't accept them.

"Milady has finally come to her senses. Have you finally realised you can't live without me?" The arrogant son of a bitch, well she isn't, but he is.

"I came to see your mother, not you, you I thought would be at your condo, with her." I nodded my head at the floozy in the doorway. The same one from the bar, who was where I wanted to be, the same floozy is grinning at me, and stood like the fucking cat that got the cream, well she did have the cream and it was mine.

"She was there earlier, she's there most days looking after me. She's so good at it too. Do you want to come and meet her?" I don't want to, but I cry.

I didn't want my eyes to leak, so not the look I was going for, not today and certainly not in front of Ben. I put the key in and go to shut the window. Get yourself out of dodge Penny, you don't need this in your life. That was the trouble, seeing him again, I did. That's the real reason I got on the plane, he's the reason I got on the ferry this morning. I wanted him back, but he was still with the floozy he got drunk with that night.

"Penny I was joking, please that's my sister, Eve." I can't believe it!

He realises he has taken the joke too far. The sheer look of terror in his face as the window rises is awful to see, but I turn the key and start the engine anyway. He didn't just fucking say that, really, he thought all this was a joke, the girl at the bar, the one stood at the door waving, is his bloody sister. She isn't being nasty when I look at her again, she simply looks happy to see me, and he looks like a moron. I was so angry at seeing her there, perhaps she never actually did give me those funny looks I bloody well imagined?

I put the car into drive and drive off. I'm leaving and as I stare at him in the mirror, I see him looking desolate. I look in the mirror again and he's fallen to his knees. I stop the car and stare at him sobbing. Good God he's crying, I reverse, and I feel like running the fucker over, instead I open the window, and use some of my colourful road rage language, I swear very well these days. I blame the asses on the roads in Europe, usually its we Brits who forget which side of the road they need to be on. I am waffling, again.

"You fucking arsehole, do you fucking know how long I've been travelling today? I was in Calais, France this morning and now I'm here and being messed around by you, yet again. You saw me in the bar that night, and yet you still let me believe she was something other than a sister?

You're a fucking moron. What did I say to you Ben, all the time? I never wanted to fall in love and I never wanted to be hurt. Yet you did it, you sat there, and you did it you broke my heart. Why, why did you hate me so much, how could you do that to me Ben? I came down again to give you a chance to talk and explain about the boozed-up-bitch you had your hands on. What a mistake that was, because shit that was even worse. I was then told by the bartender Jill, that you had gone to the woman's room, she said you insisted you take her there.

So... I waited for you in our fucking bedroom, until three in the morning. I didn't do anything wrong at all, nothing and you drowned your sorrows and left me alone. Then I thought you were in some whore's room. I'd ordered the tickets for the next plane to London. I wanted to get home, I was mad and fucking angry, sheer hate didn't quite cover the loathing I felt for you, a man, a stranger, who against my better judgment, I'd allowed into my life.

You then tossed me out, like a worthless whore you'd screwed over and had, had enough of it and me. Ben I really hated you that night, sorry that morning, and then as my ride came, I was informed you had left the hotel and you had left me alone, I thought to troll for bar talent and throw more shitty accusations my way. I felt abandoned and let down, and all thanks to you. I've been alone for weeks and I've had a lot of time to get over you. You are an arsehole."

"I guess a simple I'm sorry, wouldn't cut the mustard then?" I punched him so hard on the nose, that he falls backwards into the road. He smiles up at me, his nose is well and truly blooded.

"I guess that's given you, your answer then. I'll come and see your mother tomorrow, when her arse of a Son isn't here."

"Penny, she wants to see you. She knows your here now, please just come and see her. Please, she has waited for this for far too long already, I really am sorry, but that night Eve was explaining how the news had in fact been leaked. Her best friend, who she told, told someone else, well to cut that story short it turns out Mom knew all along. She could use the internet too, go figure? Penny, they were there for a wedding, our wedding. Mom and the girls had come to see us get married, on top of the Empire State Building, the following day.

Mom was so tired, so the others went straight to their suite to get some sleep before our big day. Eve, she stopped back to explain how the news was leaked and her, Eve drank a lot too to keep my sorry arse company and wasn't feeling great herself, the arm around her neck was me giving her a brother hug, to tell her it wasn't her fault. I was just too embarrassed to come to the room and apologise, or at least try to, I intended to, but then Eve was sick, literally sick all over me and herself. She was sick with the worry she had caused, so I put her to bed in their suite and spent some time chatting to Mom.

Then I went to change and grabbed stuff from the laundry hamper in the bathroom, I figured you had fallen asleep and you were pissed off with me, the room was in darkness, so I left you to sleep. I still had to go pick up Suzie Q from the airport, so after I changed, I set off to get Suzie. She said to wake you never go to sleep on a row, it's what her parents always told her and you, so I rushed up, only to find you'd already gone. It was a big shock, the empty bed?

We must have crossed paths somewhere between the airports and the hotel because by the time I realised you'd actually left you were in the air. I thought you would just tear me a new one, not rip me to shreds and leave. I read your replies to Suzie and she said you would be pissed at me and stewing in your room at home. I hired a plane and we came to get you. Then when we eventually landed, you had left. You were out of the country and my life again. I had a shit, shit flight back. There was no way to trace you after you purchased your ticket to Paris. You didn't use your cards and you weren't kidding I couldn't find you, and not for want of trying." His explanations sort of make sense, I'm still angry though, but so relieved he didn't cheat on me.

"I don't want you here, when I meet your mother, it has to be just her and me, none of the others either, is she alright?"

"She's fine and fighting fit, she just gets a lot of headaches, personally I think it's me annoying her and getting under her feet. Please come in and meet her, she's so pissed at me for losing you and talking about you is all I do. Please come in, just for a minute please she would love it." This isn't what I wanted, but I grab my purse and open the door, he helps me down and I lock the car. Following him in his sister laughs when she sees his nose.

"If he had done that to me, he would need surgery. Hello, I'm Eve pleased to meet you at long last." She leads me into a room to meet the rest. Ben goes to sort out his nose as the rest introduce themselves, Fran, Rosa, Terri and then finally Eleanor.

"So, you're the girl who sorted my son out, are you, the one who's had him worrying a lot over the past few months? Well it serves himself right, he's a horse's arse. Come here and let me see you." She smiled, and she moved the handbag I had clutched to my stomach. She smiled. "So, Penny my darling, when is my grandchild due then?" Silence fell around the room, well apart from a glass smashing in the background. Turn tail and run, yes run. Damn it it's too late and he's right behind me.

"Penny, you're pregnant? Hell... We were... Oh we... Well... How did it... We were... Oh yeah... Right..." His mother has the biggest smile and he looks as shocked as I was.

"I was kidnapped do you remember that little thing? Where was I going that day? So, I'm sorry I didn't make the cut off for the pill thing. I think you will agree that was a little out of my control. I didn't realise until I was in Florence, ten weeks ago, I suddenly realised I hadn't, well you know the drill, two blue lines appeared on a stick and it shocked the hell out of me, but we are fine.

I just wanted to come and tell your mother, because Fran wrote she was really ill. You, you are an arsehole, would have been the first to know if you hadn't led me to think your sister Eve was just some tart, you'd picked up in a bar, this is all your fault, all your own bloody fault. Sorry Eve about the tart thing, obviously, you are not."

"I've been called worse, and he is the biggest dickhead I know, and I know a lot of them. My Brother the moron, have you met him?" She grins. I think I like her, the tart with the heart. I am sure she isn't though.

"I'm a little tired and have to get a hotel, it was nice seeing you all and if it's okay, I'll see you again tomorrow"

"Not so fast angel, when's my grandbaby due, and are you sure you are good, because you look a little drained?"

"We are due I guess sometime in October. I don't know anything else, as I haven't as yet had tests, or anything done. I've been driving around Europe for weeks, getting over a sorry arsed baseball player who broke my heart. I will however, book in here somewhere and get checked over for everyone's peace of mind, but don't worry though, everything seems to be fine. Boo is moving and I'm fine." I turn to leave.

"Not so fast Penelope Daniels, you can't leave me hanging like this, we have to talk."

"The time for talk Benjamin Lord was half my pregnancy ago, but no you had to be a stupid ass. You make me so angry, bloody grow up or do you want me to bust that stupid nose again?" I stormed off, he followed and everyone else followed him, laughing. He caught hold of me and held me tightly. "Let me go now or so help me you will be out for the rest of the season with ball ache, and not in a good way. I'll call back and see you all tomorrow. Put me down Ben. I didn't want to tell you, just your mother. Why did you do it Ben why? Think about it and let me know in the morning." He let me go and I was in the middle of the street, and Ben had followed me.

"No, I'm coming with you, please Penny please?" So, help me God, he drives me to distraction.

"Get in the car. I can't be arguing here not in full view of the neighbours, we have been so relaxed Boo and me? Then back here to you and then the high blood pressure starts. You're just too annoying, you're just too frustrating, and you will be the death of me Ben Lord." I threw the keys at him and got in the passenger side. He waved at the girls, his mother and drove off. There was no way he was insulting my driving skills either, not tonight any way.

"Penny you should have told me that I'm going to be a father, it's a fucking big deal. I'd every right to know where you were, and that you both were safe. What if you'd had an accident over there and been alone, what if you had been ill? Shit Penny, this is way above payback for me being stupid, you should have come back and straight away, straight away Penny."

"Oh really straight away, why would I do that? Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't it you who said I was to leave, pack my bags and just leave, wasn't it you who didn't trust me to keep your secrets? It actually wasn't me who tipped off the press. I wasn't the one pretending to be with another woman, leading me to believe you had gone with that same woman, to her room. No Ben, you did all that. I was told, and this is the best one, I was to leave before you did something you'd regret, like marry me? Bit you on your arse that one, because I wouldn't marry you now, even if my life depended on it."

"I'm sorry. I needed to let off some steam. I was going to come to the room. I swear I was."

"Your first call Ben should have been to our room, to me. To see if I was alright, I would have been mad as hell but wouldn't have left you. Instead, I sat in that room praying for you to come back. when I went back down still wanting to sort it out, despite you being at fault, to find you've gone with the floozy to her room, then they said you had left. I didn't do any of those things you accused me of, and you knew it by then and yet you were still punishing me. I did everything you wanted, and you told me to do, so I left as you asked. I told you I didn't want to fall in love, and have my heart broken, but still you did it, broke my heart." My rant was over and still I feel like crap, of course I wanted to come back and tell him about our Boo. It still makes me smile seeing the blue lines. Yes, he should have been there, but he wasn't.

"I really am sorry, more than you know, it's been hell without you here. I didn't really expect you to leave me, as soon as I realised you had left me, and I couldn't find you I had to come home. I had no choice but to come back here, I had to be near Mom. I had to stop here, I had a new team, a new season and all that I really wanted to do was walk away from playing all together, and just look for you, but I couldn't, the temporary contract I signed is a ball breaker. They have me working and hard too. I had a team of people looking for my wayward fiancée because you made finding you impossible. They nearly caught you a few times, but then you were gone and sometimes just hours before they got to the hotel or farmhouse you had stopped at. They figured out the phone calls to Suzie and all the banking you did, as you left a place, so they were always an hour away.

All I have to show for all those horrid weeks is a map of Europe, where you have been, where you have stayed, were Lexi was serviced, everything, but seeing any photos of you. I am sorry Penny. I was an idiot, but being an idiot lost me the best thing in my life, you. I really just need to make sure you and the baby are fine, and then hopefully we will take it from there." He pulled up in front of a massive gate and he pressed a number in on the key-pad and he drove into a parking spot, outside a nice house. I'm not sure whose though? Oh wait it's his beachside condominium, I can hear the ocean. "We just need to talk, Penny just talk." He stepped out of the car and came to help me out, but I jumped out, ever the independent hot headed that I am. He grabbed my bags from the car and showed me up to his lounge. Nice views, those are to kill for, and it is a beautiful home. He put my bags in the spare room, which was a good move on his part.

"Do you need to eat Penny? I can order in or we can go to eat?" He looks lost, there are tiny flashes of a smile, but he's definitely troubled.

"I can always eat Ben. We have a really good appetite me and Boo. Have you got food in?" He showed me through to the kitchen and wow I love it.

"Do you cook Penny? The fridge and freezer and cupboards are full, the girls see to it that I don't starve."

"You were marrying me and didn't ever know if I could cook or not? See we don't know anything about each other at all."

"Penny, it wasn't the food I was interested in it was you, just you, you Penny, just you Baby. I didn't care if you could cook, we could eat out every night or order in, as long as I had you, I'd have been happy, I was happy."

"I suppose you have a point. Will a steak do? You seem you eat a lot of meat, if your fridge is anything to go by?" He laughed and watched me as I set about making supper, looking at the clock on the wall, it had been a while since I'd eaten.

He sat on the bar stool and watched as I chopped, stirred, cooked and cursed. He was still watching me as he set two places on the decked area, it had a wondrous view out to the ocean, it looked so beautiful, nearly as beautiful as the man looking through the window at me. I finished the steaks with a sticky homemade barbecue sauce, he watched as I opened the fridge and threw in the ingredients, smothering the steak in it and I began grilling them quickly. Supper was ready, and no words were spoken in an hour, we were just watching each other's next move.

"This smells great and looks great, thanks Penny." I carried the plates to the table, and he poured us a glass of wine.

"I don't drink Ben, I'm pregnant." He smiled removed the glasses and came back with two glasses of milk, perfect.

"I'm glad to hear it. I'm just a little new to all this stuff sorry, we didn't really do things, did we? We did do some things well didn't we, very well in fact?" He put his hand on my stomach and I shuddered I wanted to fall into his arms sit on his lap and kiss him, of course I loved him, I'd never stopped but I'm not jumping in head first this time. Then the baby moved.

"Penny, that was the baby, right? That was so..." I nodded, the smile he had on his face was huge.

"...Different, right tell me about it? I giggle all the time, when she moves and have to pinch myself all the time." He looks sad again. "Eat up and then we talk, we need to talk Ben I'm not jumping right back to where we left off, even if we are going to be parents, we don't have to be together to do that." He still looked sad but nodded and ate. We ate in near silence apart from the um's when we ate, I was so hungry the last time I ate was the meal on the ferry. With our milk drank, supper finished, and dishes are cleared, with Ben rinsing them and putting them in the dishwasher.

"Right can we talk now, Penny please? This is all killing me, you have had ten weeks to get used to you're being a Mom. Me, I was just hit with the news three hours ago. I just don't know how to put things right, I know I want to, I really want to work things out. I love you, that hasn't changed, but then again it was me who fucked up not you. Please tell me how we can get it back please Penny I want you back."

"I still love you too, but we rushed into things, really rushed into things, we didn't know anything about each other. When is my birthday, where was I born, what's my favourite perfume, do I have a favourite thing I like to do, who is on my iPod, what do I like to eat?" He smiled.

"So, if I know any or all of the answers, do I get a prize?" He smiled.

"Of course, but I decide the prize, depending on how many or even if you get any right." He smiled again.

"Your birthday is actually next week, you were born Penelope Abigail Rose Daniels, on the 4th of June 1986. You're a Gemini, you were born in Paris, France, where your father, Douglas John Daniels, was a top government official, you were born whilst he was there working. You moved back to the house you still own but can't bear to live in because your parents made bad memories for you there. You moved there when you were ten, when your father was moved back to London after an incident where he was captured, it changed both him and your mother. You're fluent in French, both spoken and written, along with Italian, from the summers spent there, in the family villa you have there. Which Penny needs a fresh coat of paint and some TLC?" I haven't been there in years. How did he know?

"You like two perfumes. Beautiful, by Sarah Jessica Parker and Daisy, by Marc Jacobs. You love to dance, tap, ballet, ballroom and Jazz. You actually do skate, and very well because your father and you skated all the time together, before his change. Walking is your obsession, and I think though you call it rambling? I looked that up, it means talking endlessly too, go figure. Running is another of your passions, this passion motivates you to compete in endless marathons for cancer and heart charities. You have more medals than I do Baby.

Your music tastes are eclectic from Miles Davis to Eric Clapton, your favourite track is Blue Eyes Blue, from one of your favourite movies Runaway Bride, again funny old thing that one, your running away too. Your favourite chick flick is a toss-up between two more Mr Gere movies, Officer and a Gentleman or Pretty Woman. You have the best collection of chick flicks ever. One my sisters would kill for, you hide chocolate in your sock drawer, you need more I ate it and you have some fabulous underwear." Oh, I blush. I have some very erotic underwear. He must have seen it too, judging by the grin on his face.

"Food, you like good home cooked food, froufrou foods, are alright if you have eaten before you go out. The Tolkien books on your shelf you love to read, and they seem cherished because they are well read. They are all first editions; you own an entire set of his works. Someone must have loved you a lot, to pay thousands of pounds for them. I would say your father, because on the first page is a small card with a handwritten message, that reads, 'Life is always fun, when there's an adventure to be had. Love you always Daddy.' Those are, I may miss one or two out, you have them all though." He named all the books on my bookshelf. I was impressed a little. Alright, a lot, I cry as he quotes daddy's note in them, they were birthday gifts received when birthdays were good. The rest Suzie and her folks bought me.

"You spend a fortune on shoes. Have I missed anything?"

"How, do you know all that?" He does know me after all.

"I have to admit spying on you, when I spent the night in your room Baby. I tried to sleep on your bed, but it smelled of you, so I ended up looking through your things. I got to know you a little better, and as I rummaged through your things, I fell deeper in love with you. Everything you are is in that room, from pictures of your parents to secret diaries. I needed to find you and apologise and get you back here where you belong. You have two things that belong to me. My heart and now my baby, I'm sorry Penny." He cried.

"It was the hardest thing I ever did, getting on the flight back to New York I had left you. I had a meeting to get to, manager-less and totally lost. Suzie bless her, she managed me in a video conference, and she took the meeting with me and showed me what to do, as you'd left me hanging. Look what a mess I got into last time that I signed a contract. Suzie says it's a good contract, but they are waiting for you to look over it, when you finally decided to get your butt back here, here where it belongs, here with me and especially now." He wasn't wrong I did leave him with the minefield of the contract. "I had a private detective trying to find you and after a few weeks we figured you didn't want to be found, it was really sneaky taking no tech stuff with you, thought you might have taken the Jog Buddy, but no, you even disabled your cars tracker. I had them check the villa, though when you hit Italy, thinking you would go there. I've photos of it, it's pretty but run down." He has looked for me too.

"Penny, I'm sorry, truly sorry, I should have come straight up I should have followed as soon as you stood in front of me and told me it wasn't you, as soon as you cried I knew it wasn't you, I was just angry at the wrong person. Then I saw the hurt in your face when you spotted me embracing Eve, but I was feeling stupid about accusing you and I knew I hurt you by telling you I would be stupid to marry you. You're right you would be stupid marrying me. I don't deserve you, not after what I put you through." He looked so gorgeous, sat watching me those near black eyes, shining through the tears, which were falling down his cheek.

"I'll look at your contracts. I can at least sort that out before I go back." He sighed.

"You're going nowhere until we sort out your health and that of our baby Penny, even then I want you to stay here with me, there's plenty of room and we can take each and every day as it comes. For now, though get some sleep you look so tired, and I've a game tomorrow." He escorted me to my room and said goodnight at the door, kissing my cheek gently, as he did that first night. Stop it, stop it now lady, we are taking it slow and easy.

"I will thank you it's been a long day. If you want, I'll come in to help sort out your contracts and watch you play. Something I haven't actually seen you do, goodnight Ben and thanks for the space." I closed the door and slid down the back of it, I feel like a ball of sexual frustration and I knew I loved him still and it hurt. I grabbed a shower to calm down, I cried under the water sobbing hard and I didn't know why, but I sat in the bottom of the shower bawling like a baby. I wanted a slap to stop me, I got that when he rushed into the bathroom and pulled me into his arm's, and I cried into his chest. Then he wrapped me in a robe and picked me up. He put me on the bed covering me and then lay at the side of me letting me cry myself to sleep, whist he stroked my belly and rubbed my back.

Chapter 15:

Waking up I'm suddenly hit by the fantastic aromas of breakfast cooking. I'd slept all night. I went to the toilet washed, brushed my teeth and did my hair, good god I need to get it sorted, I dressed in a loose skirt and a hippy looking top that I'd bought in Toulon. It made me feel chic and trendy, no strike that comfortable, chic and trendy. I put on a nice pair of black wedges and picked up my camera, I had it with me all the time now. I could if I wanted, out pap the paparazzi. Opening the door quietly, he was singing and making breakfast, the click of the camera and the shutter sounds, made him jump and I continued to click away as he smiled.

"Morning beautiful, did you sleep well, is that a new hobby?"

"Um, yes thanks I did, I loved listening to the ocean last night. The camera, yes, I figured the sights that I would be seeing needed capturing. I was on an endless journey to forget you. Some days I could, for a few minutes anyhow, when I focused on a mountain or a building or captured the faces of the locals. I loved that part of it. I've hours, sorry days, possibly weeks of photo editing to do. I suppose I can stay and do that here. Just whilst we sort Boo out, then we need to sort everything else out." His face had a smile on it, at last.

"If you're still coming in with me, you have to dress for it. Sorry Baby they have dress codes. There's also a strict set of morality clauses written into our contract. So, for now can you please wear that, I want you to wear it as a promise ring, not an engagement ring, one that says I'm trying to make it up to you for screwing up, it is my promise that I'll try my best never to let you down again." I sigh.

"Well we will have to stop for clothes then. I didn't bring any work clothes because these are what I've lived in for weeks. Sorry, I thought they would be fine for watching the game in. I guess if I'm representing you. I need to dress to impress?"

"You look lovely, Milady always does. Eat this, you have clothes here, the clothes you left in the wardrobe and the laundry at the hotel. Your clothes are in my closet, I'll get them for you after you have eaten." He watched as I ate, he sat at my side eating with me. I loved feeling his breath on the back of my neck last night, it was so comforting, it felt a little strange though, us sharing a bed again.

"Do you play every day? I tried to figure it out but gave up it was too complicated. I need your schedule, if we're going to make this work, we need to take it slowly and excuse the pun, be taking baby steps doing it too." His smile was ear to ear.

"It's straight forward Penny. I'll explain things daily and today we play the other local team, I'm just glad to have you here again. Though holding you in my arms last night was difficult, a ton of self-restraint was needed last night. My fella was busting for you, literally Baby." I removed my ring from its box and put it back on. I went to put on the clothes I had long since abandoned. It had been months since I put these on, and I didn't miss wearing them once. I slipped on the grey suit and pink blouse. I went to find the grey Jimmy's to go with it. I need to shop for bigger clothes damn it. This is tighter than a duck's backside, too tight, my boobs are popping out, and I look like I've eaten one too many desserts from the cart at dinner. My bag is ready, and the old Penny was ready for action, I grabbed my cameras, handbag and laptop bag. I've not done this in forever and strangely I hadn't missed it in the slightest. I joined Ben already waiting by the door and he grabbed my bags.

"Wow the Penny I fell for, thank you Milady. Let's get you sorted with passes and things and get a meeting set up, someone from legal is meeting you, Harry I think?" He shut the front door and caught me by surprise with a kiss, one of those kisses. Hell, here we go again.

"Slowly, Ben I need to get my head back and you are driving me to distraction isn't helping. I do love you, but you need to make me fall in love with you again. This will be your one and only chance Ben. The next trip I've got planned is a year in Australia." He smiled.

"Put it on indefinite hold Penny, please, I won't let you down again. I promise." I have to wonder if he will, he's still a beautiful stranger. We pulled up and he wound down his window. He was signing autographs again. At the same time the paparazzi stick their lens in the car. I pick up mine and from the bag in the back of the car, grabbed it and snapped straight back at them, much to Ben's utter delight, then we headed through to security to be processed. I am photographed, an access card is given, and all the other things are done, as Ben signed documents for my car.

"Ben I'm going to see about getting a new Lexi here, that one will be going back, I don't like it much." I hadn't spoken in the room and I think the English accent had them. I smiled at them. "Thank you for your help that was quite painless, where to next?" Ben snaked his arm around my waist and nuzzled my neck.

"I'll take you to see Harry and then we'll meet in an hour. I've got to warm up and stuff, we start at 3.05 this afternoon."

"How long does it last? Forty-five minutes each a side. Like football, oh crap I mean soccer?" He laughed.

"It can take as long as it takes, on average about three hours. It all depends on the pitchers. Sorry Penny will you be okay, sat for so long with the baby and all that? The girls will be here later to keep you company, they want to talk, may God help you they have a tonne of questions and remember. I love you." He leant in for another kiss and I wanted to kiss him back, but he wanted to jump straight back in where we left off. He walked me to the office and he looks so nervous and tells me to keep calm, telling me he loves me again and then finally leaving me with a kiss on the cheek before he disappears, whistling down the corridor and out of sight. Right get your professional hat on, rusty as it is. I knocked on the door and was told to come in.

"Argh, you must be the illusive Miss Penelope Daniels? We thought you would be here to sign with Ben back in February. Never mind, you have at last found time in your busy schedule for Ben, who has at the moment a monthly basic contract, not at all suitable and one we need to be fixing today, if you think you can do it. Do you think it's possible for it to be done today?" What had she eaten for breakfast, a can of sour grapes, or bloody stewed prunes? If not, she needed those last ones, her face looked like she could do with a good bowel movement. "Here is the contract read it, if you understand it, sign on the bottom of every page. Any problems get back to me, there's an empty office down the floor to the right. I'm here when you struggle with certain things. I'll try to explain it for you, they can tend to be minefields, the player's contracts."

I smiled and carried it and my bags to the office. Harry turned out to be Harriet Trent, head of legal at the LA Lions. My God and what a bitch, she made me mad as all hell with her petty mouth and her attitude, do not underestimate me Miss Trent, with your 'contracts can be a little hard to understand, they are a mine field' crap, I'm the Queen of contracts, something she will soon find out. Shit is in for a bloody shock and I hope I can find something wrong with this one.

Two hours later and there are plenty of faults. Notes are made against the differing ones I had provisionally agreed upon. I never cut the asking wages, as they desperately wanted him, so I didn't have to negotiate on that and he was on more money here too, not like he needed it. However, these were very different figures to the ones I had agreed on in our talks. I had let him down badly. I should have been here! My pep talk is over, right Penny let's buckle down. All the papers are spread out on the table, those I am okay with I turned over. I print out the emails from the team agreeing to my terms and conditions, pinned them to the discrepancies I'd found. I asked Harriet to come to the conference room.

"Having difficulty understanding the paperwork, Miss Daniels? I thought you might." I'd had enough of her attitude now, what crawled up her arse and died? She looked like she was sucking on bloody lemon slices when she spoke to me.

"No, these parts of the contract on the whole are fine, these with the yellow post notes, are just minor legal technicalities that need to be looked more closely at. To the average Joe, or in my case Ben, he would think it was a good deal, but it's not. These with the pink post noted pages, contained clauses that have his hands tied to all the team owners own personal beliefs and wishes, with little or no room for Ben to be allowed his own opinions. Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't America have a small thing called the First Amendment?" Thank you, Google. Her face looks damn frustrated now. "This part of the contract denies Ben all of the things in it. There are lots in this part I don't agree with and I won't sign nor will I allow Ben to sign. He, according to this all but has to ask your permission to pee. He isn't a child, alright given his attitude last year the owner had every right to be worried.

Those reasons were explained and fully in the very detailed email, which I sent to your predecessor, one he and the club were very sympathetic with and understanding of. The copies of all that particular part of our correspondence. Ms Trent are here, and this is the original copy of the contract Ben was to sign. You keep this copy, in case you have mislaid your copy," I show her those, "and all this was worked out prior to my sudden return to Europe, with your predecessor." Now to get to her big mistakes, which I think I am going to love, being she's so sure of herself. The red post's they mean dangerous.

"You, it seems have changed most of the agreed upon contract. This contract isn't anything like the contract I agreed Ben would be signing back in February. Therefore, he won't be signing it today. Furthermore, on showing this to the agent who advised him originally, she says having reviewed her video conference of that contract signing, and yes, she is sending me her copy as we speak, just in case it's different from the emailed copy I had.

This isn't the contract she advised him to sign. This one has missing pages, with new pages hastily added in, in their place. Please note the red post notes, whichever 'legal expert' did these pages, must have been drunk or is crap at their job and needs sacking. Those I think you will find are not acceptable, and if I hadn't spotted the changes and Ben had just signed, he would be at your personal disposal. Not even the previous legal team had as many clauses put in as you seem to have put in." Yes, Harry, I know it was you, but I need to understand why and quickly, why she'd added these, they are weird and unnecessary clauses.

"Signing that isn't happening anytime soon Ms' Trent. Ben has worked damn hard to turn his life around. He doesn't need the morality clauses, which aren't even justifiable morality clauses. The amount of time he spends with women, where he can see women, and he has to let you know if he is seeing any woman more than twice a week? Since when has enjoying female company been anything to do with a contract? He doesn't need that anyway, he has me, he doesn't need to be with any other women, other than the six he has in his life now. Ben leads a quiet, stay at home life with his mother, his sisters and now I'm back here for the foreseeable future, he will be at that home with me.

Next and this is weird too, the clause about him attending church. As far as I'm aware, being a Presbyterian isn't a riot starting, anti social threat to the team, it's a pretty religious group, but nothing your owner needs to worry about. I am informed though that some of their mothers can be a bit tetchy when it's the annual bun sale, unless it's because Ben attends church with his Mom, and you think she may want to set him up with anyone of the myriad of girls flocking to see the star pitcher, whilst he is singing rock of ages? That clause is not needed, either as the church he attends is fully aware he's spoken for, his mom happens to like the woman he picked to be his wife, which just happens that's me? Ms Trent, I can't see any enforceable legalities in most of this nonsensical, full of bull shit, laughable contract of yours, it is yours, isn't it? If I find out, as I suspect you have or are doing, that you are also using his mother's illness against him, then I think you will find that the club will chose their star pitcher, over you, their washed out half arsed lawyer. How did you get the job, by sleeping with the interviewer?"

I had a drink of water. Half an hour later and she was leaving with her tail between her legs. I had been watched for the majority of the meeting by the Lord Sisters, who sat open mouthed and silent, apparently, an unusual occurrence? I gathered the contract up carefully and dropped it off, with the notes from the meeting, into Harry's capable hands, as she had stormed out of the conference room without it. She won't 'contracts are a minefield' me again in a hurry. Contracts are fantastic stress builders and I need one of his kisses, shit I need a whole lot of those kisses.

I went to see Ben with the girls, who assured me to knock and go in. Oh, those little bitches, Ben's teammates were in various states of undress, someone shouted female in the room, towels were on covering male bits both big and small, umm. Many apologies were given to too many young, handsome and yes naked men. Ben's face was a picture.

"Your sisters are going to pay for that, they said it was your locker room and to come in. I should have realised you didn't get your own room." He just laughed and told the room that I was his wayward fiancée. He also told the assembled cast we were having a baby. Great, now I'll need to update the press office and the lemon sucker.

"Your contract is being rewritten, and you can sign it after the game, it was a shit contract too. I'm sorry I wasn't here Ben and I'm so glad you didn't sign it. Right I'm going to eat and watch you play, good luck and break a leg, not literally Ben, but well do what they are paying you mega bucks to do." I actually gave him a kiss and walked out. Phew, naked arses, the girls would get my uttermost thanks. Their faces as I walked out said it all, he was right, his sisters are a nightmare, a laughable set of rouges.

"It was a nice view in there, Ben wasn't happy that I saw so many naked arsed men though, phew, it made for a nice sight. Right let's find our seats, apparently, you know where we sit?" They were laughing at me or with me, I'm not sure which, but they were smiling. I had with me my camera bag and handbag, all the other stuff I had locked in the office, for later. I chat to Terri as the twins, Rosa and Eve, went for food, hot dogs, and coke for me. Frances was with her boyfriend Aaron and watching the game.

"Do you love my little brother, because he loves you? I only ask, because he has been distraught for months, whilst you found yourself in Europe Penny. He missed you so much and there was never a bad word said against you, only his regrets for what he had done, well do you?" I am being given the once over by the big sisters, the twins are cool with me and Fran sent me the hooky emails, so I guess she's routing for a reunion? Terri though she's a tad frosty, and rightly so, she loves her brother and is watching his back. God, I'd love to have them watching over me like this.

"I love your brother yes, of course I do, more than anything well apart from her," my hands hugged Boo, "she will always come first. As to going to find myself in Europe, I didn't go to find myself, I wanted to get lost there. I wanted desperately not think about him, I failed miserably because the further I went, the harder it got. I didn't do anything wrong Terri, I was shocked at the bitter angry man who told me marrying me would be the worst thing he ever did, I didn't need to hear that from him, him of all people.

Hell what did I expect, six days I knew him, six days and three of those I was locked in a room, tied to a bed, beaten, left to pee myself and sleep in a drugged up state, so much so they wanted to test for rape, but they didn't need to, thank God, that wasn't that great for me. Then later that night we had our last night and I didn't need him to tell me he hated me, not after what I'd had done to me. I had a lot going on too Terri and nobody and no family to run home too, so I ran yes, ran to find something or some place and when that didn't work, I went back home." She gave me a hug as the tears came, oh heck that was nice too.

"If I hadn't seen Fran's email, telling me your mum had, had a bad time and was ill last weekend. I wouldn't have come here at all, but I didn't want her not knowing about her much wanted Grandchild, the one thing Ben said she hoped she would get before. Well, before she died, and I had to see her. I got on the first plane here, but deep down I knew I wanted to come back. I just was too stubborn to do it, you know, come and find my baby's father and give him a piece of my mind, for hurting me? I don't want to be hurt again Terri, ever. Yet he thought it was still something of a joke. He oh, he was still being an idiot, so when I punched his nose it felt so good, his bloody nose was the result of twenty weeks of frustration. Driving off though, seeing him on his knees in the road and crying. No, I couldn't leave him again because it broke my heart seeing him sink to his knees, even though the arsehole deserved it." She laughed and agreed. She had already torn a strip off him for doing it.

"I bet you all think I'm a tramp for getting pregnant, and I did it all for his money? I didn't, I have more than enough money of my own, not Ben's amount, but enough that I never to have to work again and still live well. We weren't as careful as we thought, and I had never had sex before, and I wasn't on birth control. I was not expecting to do that, with him or anyone and we got carried away. I was on my way for the morning after pill, when Howarth grabbed me, and I missed the time thing. Then when I got back, we got lost in the moment again. Now your niece is on her way because I didn't get the morning after pill. Something I am happy about now she's in here. When I first realised, I was pregnant, of course I wanted to come and tell him, he was the only one I wanted to share my news with." She gave me a hug as the tears fell down her face.

"It seems you probably love him more than he deserves, he's the one that needs your forgiveness, but he's useless when it comes to girlfriends. They are even more alien to him, so Lord forbid a fiancée, who for the record has never been thought of as a tramp. Our Mom and Dad met, when he was here on spring break and he never left, because a week later, they married in Vegas and nine months to the day, I was born. Mom isn't going to judge you when your life has mirrored her own, me I won't judge, but I do love my brother and will kill to keep him safe. It seems you will too. Welcome to the family even more girls, I feel a film night at Mom's after the game, popcorn and tortillas, oh but what film?"

"Sleepless in Seattle, followed by Pretty Woman, if he doesn't take the hint after those two then we are screwed Terri." She laughed at me again. His family certainly likes to laugh at me.

"When can we have a wedding? That dress he got you is to die for but leave it any longer and you won't get it on." We laughed as the food arrived it looked like we were feeding the five thousand.

The players were now on the field and wow, he looked really hot and I'd seen him naked. I took shots of the team, focusing on Ben for my sin's, I swear he smiled up at me too. I got some great crowd shots, and photos of the girls are sneakily taken and then I hear a roar from the crowd as someone made or did a home run. Explanations from Aaron are much needed. I look like a right royal idiot, it's a ball pitched and then hit, out of the court, allowing the player to get around, not well for the fella pitching, but good for Ben's team?

I won't see Ben hit a ball either he doesn't hit he just pitches. I am now confused totally. I'm here watching a sport I know next to nothing about, watching a man, I know just as little about and well I'm not sure where all this is going? I know I'm deeply in love with the man I'm watching, of that I've no doubt, but the things he said to me they still haunt my dreams and they creep into my thoughts, he really meant the words when he said them and that's what was hurting me the most. Two hours in and I had a security guard come get me, Harry needed to see me. Round two, and what's betting there will be blood spilt? Terri came with me for back up.

"Ms Daniels, these are the new contracts, and we have some stipulations of our own, can you check those first?" There were bright pink post notes on sections. I sat down Terri at my side and read it, signing the ones that were fine, and then I noticed a hidden clause.

"He has to ask permission to get marry. Who gives that then, you Ms Trent?" I saw her eyes! "It is you, now there's a surprise. Too late I'm afraid, because Ben had already agreed to marry me and before he came here. So, we will not need that clause in it. Ms Trent, you're presuming far too much of my fiancé, you have no legal rights to stop any players marriage? Besides, as we are having a baby, who is due the in October, so we will be married within a month.

I, it seems have been away far too long. I may add that I am more than qualified to do your job, way more than you, it seems and for the record, my specialist field of law is contract law. Might I suggest you find the original copy, the one I agreed Ben should sign with your predecessor? That one was damn perfect, yours is a mismatch of non-legal and illegal clauses. Which I will be showing to your boss, now they do say third time's a charm Harry?" She had the original contract placed before her by me. I collected my things and as I read, put my seal on the bottom of all the pages I had signed. I tied them off and put on my own seal, so no pages could be added or taken away, it seems this bitch may yet try something else. No seal or broken seal and neither Ben nor I would sign. All the time her beady eyes were burning into me. She was, and is a proper head case, or as Suzie would say, she's a right weirdo.

"Right the contract is good to go, here are the list of charities he will be sponsoring, they will include children with anger issues, homeless families, veterans and of course children with special needs. He does meet and greets behind doors and nothing else, unless it goes through my office, which will be up and running later in the week. His personal Lions Facebook page will be monitored closely by me, as will his Twitter accounts and all social media networking, we hate them, but that's where the modern media is heading, social interaction sites are the future. Thank you for today it's been most informative."

Terri grabbed my bags for me, and we headed back. She had listened to my talking down to Harry and loved it, for some reason she hates her too? I think I know why, but I will ask the offending article later. Meeting Ben after the game, one they had won, he is a good mood for some reason, and very grabby with my backside. He and I go to sign his contract and as I sit and watch, he signs the new revised contract. Harry smiles down at him and as she does so, her arm accidentally touches his back, but he pulls away then smiles at me, he leans over kissing me tenderly as he did. I love it when I'm right, she's on a mission to nowhere with Ben, because he's mine bitch.

"Right Milady, we have to get you something to eat and to bed, you have had a busy day, you and our Boo need plenty of TLC." Harry looks over at the pair of us and is a tad mad, I'd say she's as green as the dress she's nearly wearing, what is the dress code here, hooker meets showgirl?

I then wonder if she's been sucking her lemon slices? He posed for photos and we headed off. He hadn't allowed me out of his nor Terri's sight, at any point since Harry and I had our meeting. He carried my bags to the rental car, as Terrie was in his. I needed out of this restrictive suit and into comfortable casual wear, a shopping trip is called for and new dresses are needed preferably comfortable loose ones. First on the agenda tomorrow though, I need a doctor's appointment and as soon as possible. The baby hadn't been as active today and I was worrying a little. Ben sensed something was wrong as we drove home. I told him I was a little concerned, and we headed straight to his family's doctor.

"Penny never keep things from me, I need to know everything you're going through." I smiled as right on cue a kick to the kidneys and a desperate need to pee. My relief was apparent as the kick Ben felt too. He had been leaning in for a feel and a kiss. I'm taken through to Doctor Andrews office, his walls are full of picture drawn by his many young patients. He was a paediatrician, because here you have a different doctor for everything it seems. All the lectures about caring for me and my baby and keeping my stress to a minimum are given, I looked at Ben, he was the only stress in my life, and he knew it too.

I lay on the examination table watched by Ben as my belly was prodded and poked. The doctor smiled and then wheeled out a table with a sonogram machine on. We were getting our first look at Boo, up close and personal. The doctor made a few scans across my gelled bump, all whilst I was holding on to Ben's hand for dear life, the doctor smiled, a few more strokes of the wand and he turned the screen towards Ben and me. I knew what I was looking at and I looked in disbelief at the doctor and he smiled back, Ben was grinning.

"That's our Boo Milady, but can someone tell me why you two are smiling at me?" I had more than a tear in my eye.

"Those are your Boo's, Benjamin there are two." The doctor pointed out the obvious to a shocked Ben. The grainy picture on the screen clearly showed a whole mass of limbs, two babies. I cried a little more, as Dr Andrews made a phone call, and made us an appointment at the hospital for a full work up, and a newer up to date scan, he gave me a prescription for all the prenatal medication I would need. A very happy Ben and I headed to dinner, we stop at a drive through burger bar, and I have the works, because I'm so hungry. Ben warns me about what I eat, and he got the scowl. I was so relieved the babies were fine. The photo in Ben's hand as he sat in the driver's seat made him cry. I leant over and gave him a kiss to his cheek.

"This has been the best day, in such a long time. Do you fancy going tell Mom, Penny?" As if he even had to ask.

Chapter 16:

Eleanor and the girls were, it seems, just as happy as Ben. They were thrilled and I, well I was in the middle of a happy family, this whole thing was something I had always wanted. My need to be part of a massive family and thanks to Ben I had that, well sort of?

"You're real quiet, Penny are you alright?" I looked up and Ben was over my shoulder leaning into the comfortable chair, where I sat hugging my legs and relaxing.

"I'm fine I think, but I think for the time being you're my only client. I don't need the stress in my life more overpaid jocks bring to it, is that alright?"

"Sure, I've more than enough money Penny."

"I've my own money, Benjamin Lord. I don't work because I have to, I work because I liked it, and I think I may have mentioned that before? Now I don't want to be a lawyer or an agent, especially after today and the bitch fess that was Harry. When did you two date, or was I wrong?" He looked at me in horror, yes, I'd guessed right, and all because of how he was when he left me at the office and how she was and why he made such a fuss over me when she came near, I put the facts together and it all made perfect sense.

"I dated her, well if you can call it that when I had my mad, feel sorry for me months when I first got to New York, she and I well, were friends for a whole three weeks." I knew the looks I got were given for a reason.

"I guessed as much, she followed you here then?"

"She got the job a couple of months ago, her Godmothers some relative of the owner, and yes she did ask if we could take up where we finished off and no before you ask Milady, you have been the only girl I've been with or wanted from seeing you sat in the office that very first day. She doesn't handle rejection very well and is a little persistent." I bet she is.

"Well that explains the nastiness from her then. She looks like she's sucking on lemons when she speaks to me. Right are we going back to your place then? I'm really tired and could do with a shower and my bed Ben." We said our goodbyes and left them to it.

The drive home was quiet, and I just wondered where we were heading, I drifted off to sleep whilst leant against the window, the thoughts of what happens now are giving me a headache. I woke as the car came to a stop, Ben opened my door and gently picked me up. I nestled in as I always did, into his chest, and he carried me to his room. I was too tired to argue and really needed Ben to hold me and tell me everything was going to be fine.

I wonder though why he lied about dating anyone, before me it didn't matter, he made a point of saying no one serious though. I needed the loo and I needed it quickly, because I'm spectacularly sick, making it just to the toilet in time. Oh God this is horrid, and Ben I think, is back from bringing the bags up, as I go in for around two and crying out for help. He rushes in, and as calm as anything, takes a washcloth from the sink and wipes it along the back of my neck. He braids my hair and uses the hair bobble from my wrist to keep my hair from the toilet bowl and the sick.

"Are you alright Baby, have you finished?" I nod and cry at the same time, he helps me to my feet and to the sink, oh I need to brush my teeth, Ben pulls out a new toothbrush and squeezes toothpaste on it. I figure my breath must really pong if I didn't have to ask.

"Thank you, I don't think me and burgers or hot dogs and all the crap that was on the top are friends anymore. I haven't thrown up the whole pregnancy, why start now?" Ben smiles and walks me to the bedroom. "So, I'm back to sharing your bed Mr Lord?" I just needed a cuddle.

"I was hoping you would, nothing more that wanting you in my sight all the time Penny. I never want to lose you again. Please stop with me tonight, I promise there will be no funny stuff." Um pity I could use some funny stuff right about now too.

"Alright, I enjoyed being held last night it felt safe, and I enjoyed hearing you sleep and knowing you were actually there and not just in my dreams, that was so nice." I removed the skirt, which was I think causing the problems.

It was way too tight and the blouse, well the boobs are bigger and I'm nearly popping buttons off it. I abandon all my clothes as Ben locks up. I hear him on the phone to someone arguing and cursing, but I can't hear the conversation. I grab a tee shirt of Ben's from his closet and climb in bed. I definitely need pregnant person clothes. I think, I'm on his side of the bed, but as soon as my head hits the pillow, I sleep.

Waking in the night the bed is empty. I go for a wonder in search of Ben, and as I flit from room to room, I find myself alone in his house. Where is he and I panic about why he had left me? I make myself a drink of green tea, then I sit and wonder where he is? The night air is so cool, and the sea breeze is nice, so I sit on the balcony and stare out to watch the ocean waves breaking gently on the beach. This view is calming, and I sit and watch the waves for a while. I go back inside and grab my laptop.

I've not had this on for a few days other than to download the emails for the lemon sucker. I wonder what Mr Lord was actually up to whilst I was away. I fire up Google, my trusty blabber mouthed friend. Typing in his name and wow, what I see sort of makes me mad. I wonder where he is now, because this picture went live on the 'Lula's LA Land' web page, just an hour ago and he is pictured coming out of the club with the lemon sucker. What the fuck, he's left me here alone, whilst he takes her out on a fucking date? I don't think so. I look and there are several pages of pictures of him and with her, over the past few weeks. I go back to when he first arrived in New York and sure enough, they are together in those too. She's the woman with the blonde hair, in a fair few of the old pictures, then I check the boozy time in New York and there's one of him and her again, though she's a red head in that one.

The bastard he's lied to me. God, I'm so not running this time, not running no, I am staying, and he can explain. My inner Penny has already packed her bags and is putting her best running shoes on. I go to the office set up he has here, print out the photos, leave them on his freshly made bed, pick my things up and go to my room. I lock my door and climb in the bed. I'll keep the appointment for nine in the morning at the hospital and when I get the results, sort out a place here or I may fly home. I'm not sure what I want, but I know I don't want to be lied to anymore.

I fall asleep and I'm woken by Ben asking to talk. I ignore him and try to sleep, it's five o'clock and he's just coming in? I don't want to hear lies at this time in the morning and I don't want to be hurt any more than I'm hurting right now. I sleep for a while and I feel sick again. I head for my toilet and shout for someone to help me as I throw up and cry again. I then feel my legs collapse and as I fall, I see the vanity unit is heading my way. I wake up on the bed, Ben is by my side with Terri and the girls stood watching. Eleanor is on the bed to my left, wiping my head.

"What happened Penny? Ben called us when he found you slumped on the bathroom floor, you have cut the side of your head, are you feeling alright? Help her sit up Benjamin." She used his 'he's left muddy footprints' name. Yes, what have you done Benjamin?

"Penny are you feeling well enough to tell us what happened?" I look at Terri, then at Ben and he won't look me in the face. Shit, has he done something bad and I'm not going to like it, he can't look at me as he helps me to sit up, my headaches and ouch there will be a sorrowful bruise on my shoulder tomorrow too and I ache. I grab my belly, and all is fine, they're having a dance party in there.

"I threw up and as I stood up, I got really light headed and got blindsided by the vanity unit, after that I woke up in here with you lot, it was after Ben got in at five thirty, so about sevenish or eightish, I don't know I was busy being sick?" Let him wriggle out of that one. He walks out, and I look at the time and it's just after eight.

I ask them to join Ben, whilst I shower and change. I definitely need to make a doctor's appointment now. I need to know what's happening to me and when can I go home? I have the nicest of showers and though I ache where my shoulder smacked the floor hard, I've just a tiny cut to my head. I dress in comfortable clothes, I don't intend to go back to the stadium anytime soon, and I don't intend to wait around for him to lie to me anymore. Why did I come to look for him again? Oh, that's right, because I love the fucker, oh hell and he makes me angry. I brush my hair and tie it in top ponytail and slip on my shoes and go to face his family.

"What went on last night Penny? Ben has left for training early and hasn't said anything. I figure it's bad because he's just left me here to deal with this." Terri knows her brother, so I show her the things from last night and she too is shocked.

"He cares so much about me, that he left me all alone after I had spent an hour throwing up. I woke up and he wasn't here. I know it's bad because he's not even bothering to explain it. I'll keep this appointment Terri and I'll call to see you at your mothers when I'm through. I think I'll be on this afternoon's flight home though. I can't stop to have him break my heart more, than he already has done."

She looks upset and leaves me to it. I pick up the paper with the details of the appointment and program the Satnav with the destination. I check my bag and head off, following the simple directions it gives me, and hell for once I'm actually in the hospital car park and in the right place. Triumphant at my small victory, I grab my purse and head in. I hear my name called, so I go in and just as Ben arrives. I didn't expect him to be here, so I am a little shocked, yet secretly pleased that he's here. I wouldn't stop him coming in and they are his children too.

"Miss Daniels, I'm Dr Marcie, I'll be seeing you through to the end of your pregnancy I'm your obstetrician, your carrying twins and have only had one visit to the doctors in the past twenty weeks is that correct?"

"That's correct, I was on a photographic holiday in Europe and found out ten weeks ago. I eat relatively well whole foods and organic were possible, but since being here I tend to go with what I'm given to eat. I had a really bad reaction to a chilidog yesterday and it caused no end of sickness and I actually passed out banging my head, early this morning because of the pain." Ben goes to hold my hand and I snatch it away. I'm not looking at him.

"Well, we will run all the usual blood works and we will weigh you and generally give you your first full body pregnancy service and oil change." She smiles at Ben and I don't think I introduced her to their father.

"I'm sorry Dr Marcie this is the baby's father, Ben Lord. I'm forgetting where my manners are, I'm sorry, but I didn't sleep too well last night." He gives me that look, go see the lemon sucker and leave, I fully intend to after this session. I need clarification on the babies' health and I'm off. I can't look at him for fear of crying.

"Right slip the gown on behind the screen, and come and lie on the bed, I'll be right with you." I do as I'm asked. Ben follows, he's worried I'll fall over. I climb up and await her inspection, she comes in with the heart monitor and blood pressure cuff and we begin, our babies are a good size, and both have strong heartbeats. My blood pressure is a little high and bloods taken, and I do a water sample.

He tries to speak to me and explain things, but I just shush him. Shown to another room where we await our 4D-Scan, this will be able to tell us the sex of the twins and show in detail what they look like. I can't wait for this. I saw one of the girls' pictures of her little girl at Meridian and it was so clear, she said watching the screen it was as if she was in the womb, looking in at her. I had to have one of those. We are alone whilst the sonogram technician takes a phone call.

"It wasn't what it looked like Penny. I promise you. I really didn't do anything wrong, I promise, but we do really need to talk. I left you a note on the lounge table did you not get it?"

"It doesn't matter to me now what you do Ben, suck as many of her lemon kisses as you want, you're a free agent and have every right to see whomever you wish. Ben, you told me a lie once, shame on me if I let you do it twice. I'll keep these appointments up in London and will keep you updated on their progress. Other than the twins, we have nothing to discuss. It was the big mistake I made coming here and one I'm now living to regret, take your hand off me or leave." He does just that and lets out a sigh. I'm fighting back the tears.

"Sorry about that Mommy and Daddy, let's get a look at your babies." He does a few strokes with the gelled wand over my stomach back and forth and smiles. I watch as he clicks and scans some more, then shows us our babies and wow, we can see every single detail, the clarity is wonderful. He prints of a row of pictures he has already taken and as he moves the wand.

"Do you want to know the sex of your two little babies?" Both Ben I together said yes. He moved the wand as Ben's face is near glued to the screen.

"You are having boys. they are both little boys." I had bonded with my daughter too. I looked at Ben as the tears flowed, well he had every right to be tearful these were the last things he would see until I sent him the next lot. I looked at the screen and sobbed, Ben's hand comes in for a hold and I actually hold it tightly, they were there, clear as crystal our two perfect little boys. I asked for two lots of the disc and the photos and thanked the Sonogram Man. We waited in Dr Marcie's office and now I really just wanted to leave. I wanted to be on the next flight home. She came into her office and looked very serious.

"Penny did either of your parents have any heart problems?" I looked at her and I am now worried as hell.

"My mother had a heart attack, when my father was captured, and my father was prone to panic attacks and stress attacks after the kidnapping, why?"

"We are admitting you Penny. My colleague Doctor West is going to run some tests on you. I spotted a slight abnormality with your heart rate. Penny do you keep yourself fit and healthy normally?" I was in shock, so Ben takes over and answers her question gripping my hand.

"She does yes Doctor, she runs, she's a marathon runner and she is into something called rambling?" I smile as he remembers. Then I realise he's still in my bad books.

"I've got to be on the next flight to London, Dr Marcie."

"You're not going anywhere Penny. You need to get this sorted and quickly." Ben gripped my hand even tighter and I'm deep in shock at the doctor's words.

"I need to have some things brought in for her, how long is Penny going to be here? I'll need to let the bosses know my fiancée is ill. I need to be here with her and the babies." I'm not your sodding fiancée, I'm just a stupid woman who fell in love with a bloody two-timing lying bastard, that's what I am. "She needs a private room. My Mom will be sitting with her until I get back. I don't want her left alone at any time. Will that be alright Doctor?"

"You're paying the bills Mr Lord. I can't see any problem with her family being around her." Err, what am I chopped liver, woman with heart problems and twins in progress, is still in the bloody room?

She hands Ben directions to the coronary care unit here within the hospital and they know I'm coming. I don't think I've spoken in the last half hour and Ben he continues to ask if I'm alright, over and over but nothing, I feel empty and lost, what the hell have I got and why did I get pregnant? Would the babies be alright? I've a hundred questions going through my dazed and confused mind, and then the questions for Ben are in there too and will need a hell of a lot of explaining.

Looking at the man sat at my bedside, I have to wonder what the story is? He hasn't let go of my hand in over an hour and never left my side whilst I've been here. The last words I spoke to him were to get his hands off me and he's still holding it for dear life. I'm taken for scans and have test, after test done. I know things are happening to me I'm just not sure why? I need to snap out of this state of mind. I need to, I'm a strong woman with responsibilities and people who are depending on me, and then as Ben uses the bathroom and I'm finally alone. I breakdown and cry, really cry.

The nurse comes in to look me over and do the checks she needs. I'm heartbroken over the man I truly love and over the lies and confusion I'm feeling. I'm so messed up and confused with another belly breaking sob I throw up, wonderful. The nurse, Sally and another change the sheets as I sit with my head in a sick bowl. I don't handle being physically sick well at all. I still cry for my mummy even now at twenty-four. I know she's not coming to help, but one who does is equally as nice, Eleanor comes in as I start upchucking again. She asks the nurse for ice chips and comes to my side tissues in hand and hugs at the ready. Ben is hovering by the bed, as she scowls at him.

"Penny, we need to get you fixed and home with me, you're too sick to travel home and I would like it if you stopped with me and I can look after you and my grandsons." I finish, and the nurse takes it away. This isn't how envisaged this story playing out at all. A quick trip here, tell her about her grandchild, next plane home with the job done. Instead, I'm here throwing up and being welcomed into his family, whilst he still dates the lemon sucker. Hell, what a mess, but I'm too stunned to do anything but listen. The doctor comes and explains what he has found as Ben grips my hand tightly.

Dr West is my cardiothoracic surgeon and he tells me not to worry, the first tests done look good, and it will be the next lot of tests that will tell them what, if anything, I have wrong with me.

"Dr Marcie is good at her job, but then again I'm better at mine than delivering babies. Please don't worry, this looks like nothing more than very severe panic attack. Have you been under stress recently, or more than normal, have you had bad heartburn, do you eat a lot of, sorry for this and for the want of a better word ladies, crappy food?" The girls and his mother look at Ben and they all say his name at once. They take him outside much to the doctor's amusement and mine too, seeing them tear him a new one, he looks at me with those puppy dog eyes, no I do not forgive you sunshine.

"I had a chilidog at his game yesterday, which tasted fine and I enjoyed it, then I had a really nice burger, which again I enjoyed, but yes I've eaten crappy food since I've been here in America. In Europe though I ate all healthy foods, whole grains, organic foods and things straight from the farms I stayed at, I really looked after myself and Boo. I just fancied eating a little crappy, fatty food, and in Ben's defence, he did tell me I should be eating healthily, and the stress? Well everything Ben and I do is stressful, he's a very stressful type of guy." I frown in his direction.

He already looks like crap as his mother and sisters are tearing a strip off him in the corridor as I watch. I am given a drip, which will feed in any medication needed. Ben and Eleanor come back into the room and sit at the window talking. I'm too tired to listen, but I listen with closed eyes anyway. As Ben is given a shopping list and yet another telling off, this time about his straying from the path, he needs this, he needs me and nobody else, the girl he has, is the right one. Me!

"Are you alright Penny? Mom is going to stop with you for a while, me and Terri, are going to go buy you some things, will you be alright?" I nod. I'm still not talking to you; you are an arsehole.

"She will be fine go all of you and bring her laptop, she will need something to do whilst she's here, and I think our Penelope is a little shocked and dazed by all this, aren't you?" I nod.

"I just want to sleep, and I'm confused, I keep fit, I eat well, why me?"

"All will be fine, perhaps because you're healthy, it's helped you and having the stress you have had over the past few days hasn't helped." She stares at her son. "We need to keep you stress free for the sake of your health and that of my grandsons, who'd have thought it boys. I was so convinced you would have a girl, but two boys, now that's something to look forward to." The rest leave and Mom tells me to sleep. She insists on Mom, she says Eleanor is too formal. I smile and settle in to sleep, the drugs are starting to work and are relaxing me, I drift off into a blissful sleep.

I must have slept for quite a while because Ben is back, and it's pitch black outside. He and his mother are talking. I keep my eyes closed and listen as he explains last night, this should be good.

"Mom, I got a phone call from the club were Henry had spent the night and a lot of money getting drunk, she was wasted and wouldn't leave and as she had been there before with me, and a few of the other fellas from the team, they called me. She gave them my number, telling them I was her fiancée and she was expecting my baby. What was I supposed to do, have her tell everyone she was having a non-existent child and cause a scene?

The door attendants they didn't want a scene with a pregnant woman, and she would only leave with me, so I went to get her as I've done three or four times over the past two months or so. She never goes to the same club and gives them the same story repeatedly. Mom, she tells them the same thing every time. I've had the threat of a non-existent pregnancy with two women now, but this time I didn't have Penny to sort out Harry. I can't manage her on my own, she's a disturbed woman, and she frightens me." I was right on that too, she's a proper wacko.

"I know she can get people to believe her lies, she's very persuasive, because she has done it to others in the past. She hates Penny because she knows I love Penny, and nobody else and I have told her that from day one. That dreaded day she started here with the Lions, she asked for a meeting in her office, she made it clear she wanted back in my life, she said she'd see to it I was transferred away from you, if I didn't have her back and so I told her Penny is the only one for me.

She's a mental case Mom, she refuses to believe I don't love her, she says she will do Penny harm. She's so messed up and I reluctantly and stupidly, left Penny alone. I was gone an hour and a half at the most, I picked her up dropped her at her hotel, were the staff there and accompanied her to her room. I wanted to tell her to leave us, Penny and I alone, but she was wasted, and it was pointless. I left her passed out in their reception she's their problem. I haven't been with her that way Mom, not here. Years ago, yes, I was that stupid, but since I met Penny, I have never looked at another woman. I love that woman there in that bed, that's the only girl for me, lying sick in that bed, with our children."

"You need to tell her, because those pictures tell a whole different tale Son, you look kind of cosy. Penny had every right to flip, especially when you were such a horse's arse with the Eve thing, just look what stress you have put the mother of your sons through, your own mother is still kind of pissed at you Benjamin David Lord, then you stormed off and didn't explain?"

"I know, but she was sound asleep, and I didn't want to wake her. There was a note on the table, but when she opened the lounge door, it must have blown off the table with the breeze. Terri found it and read it, and it explained everything she isn't mad at me. I stormed off because Harry's actions caused serious problems for Penny and the babies. I didn't want her to ruin it for me, Penny was starting to forgive me slowly, but those photos will have her running back to England, and I didn't want to lose her again, so I had to get her sorted out before it gets even worse than it has.

Harry, she's being sorted by the club doctors because she's their problem, not mine. That's why I went to the club and that's where I stormed off to, I've made an official complaint about her sexual misconduct and I don't ever want anything to do with her. I'm sorry Mom, but where she's concerned, I'm no gentleman anymore. Look what one stupid phone call leads to and what those damn photos have done to Penny, that's why I left, to sort out Harry. I hope Penny doesn't leave me, Mom she can't leave me."

"Well Son, Fran and Eve are here to take me home now. I need to get some sleep. When they let her out, she's to come stay with us, just whilst you're at work, she needs some mothering from her new Mom and we will sort this, you need to tell her all this and tell her you love her. She may listen, after she calms down. Lord knows why, but she loves you, nobody flies all this way because she wanted to see me.

She wants you in her life, tell her what you told me, but put the truthful bits in too, when you slept with the girl, all be it when you first got there, and for the few times you were feeling sorry for yourself, just don't lie to Penny. The truth is always better than a half-arsed lie son, never lie, they come back and bite you in the ass, like the viper that Harry woman seems to be, best I don't get my hands on her." She makes me smile into my pillow.

"I will, and you take things easy too, get Eve to sort out my room and put her in there, the beds big and comfy. It's only fair she gets to snoop in my room, I went through hers. Though you may want to get them to throw away the reading material under the bed and keep Goldie out of there, she will jump all over her." She laughs loudly, and I smile into the pillows.

He didn't lie, and he never cheated, why do I think the worst of him? Maybe it's because I don't know him well enough. She gives my head a kiss, and I murmur into my pillow as she leaves. I look at him, as he is staring out of the window and I swoon, now is that me or am I having an episode? I stir as he comes to my bedside and as he sits on the bed, I smile up at him.

"Evening beautiful, how are you?"

"I'm fine really hungry though, I could eat a horse." He smiles and leans over, his hand gently caressing my cheek I respond by leaning into his touch and he smiles again.

"We need to talk Baby you really frightened me last night. I came back, and you had locked the door, and I heard the glass smash and I had to bust the door in to get to you. Penny I didn't do anything with her I promise you, Milady is my one and only lady." I listen and having heard him tell his mother. I'm wondering too will he tell me the truth? "She's definitely in my past Penny. She and I would for want of a better word go on a date, when I first arrived broken hearted from LA, we would drown our sorrows together, we slept together a couple of times. I went home after she passed out, so we were sort of together way back then, and for a long time too, oh for a whole three weeks?

They were hell at the time, it was my first week in New York. I was raw, hurt and angry and she was just someone to screw and drink with, another way of getting something out of my system, but she became too clingy and phoned me harassed me, you name it she did it. I had taken a restraining order out on her, and she went back to Texas, after she broke the order, by getting the staff to let her in my room, she played the wife card, in from LA to see me as a surprise, and God was I surprised.

She was in some kinky stuff and handcuffed to my bed, at least she was arrested in the room, she'd swallowed the keys and was drunk, she was shipped off back home damned quick. Then when I had my drinking time and I had one date with her in August, and yes, I nearly slept with her again. Though I didn't know it was Harry, until it was too late, yes, I was drunk, and she was wearing a red wig and glasses. It didn't last long when I pulled off the wig as we were about to get down and dirty, I ran as quickly as my drunk ass would take me, I sobered up and never went out with a woman after her.

I haven't slept with anyone in years, dates yes, sleeping with no. I only drank myself stupid in August, and never had sex, especially with her. I promise, on everything I hold dear to me, I swear I've never slept with anyone since you, no one but you baby, just you. Then when I moved here, two months later she, she started working here too.

It's been a nightmare few months and she's still a drunk Penny. God knows how she even landed the job, even with her connections because she's always drunk, but the job gave her a certain power over me at work. She made several attempts to get me back in her bed and I wasn't interested at all, not having a contract meant weekly meetings with her, then you came back, and I was so relieved, because there would be no reason for the meetings. I always went in with someone else Milady I didn't trust her."

"Good job you did Ben, I have a feeling she would play the sexual harassment card next and the photos would back her case. They made me think you were cheating on me again." He sighed and kissed me. I smile and ask him to finish his tale.

"You went in and sorted my contract out. She was angry when you told her about our baby. You had her take the marriage clause out of her rewritten contract, telling her about our engagement, way before I came here. She turned nasty with me and said I would be sorry for two timing her. I did point out I had publicly announced our engagement, the night you were returned to me and that my new club already knew I had a fiancée.

Perhaps she didn't want to believe me, when I told her about you and our engagement, the first day she got me in the office here and said she wanted a third chance. I told her again and again, I was already engaged to you, and you were away in Europe. She promised to get her revenge, and this is her pathetic way of doing it. She tells people, mainly door attendants, she's carrying my child, they phone, and I fucking go for her. After all women can do that, pretend to be pregnant to get what they want. Please don't hit me for that comment, you already had me without the babies Penny." He looks at me with concern.

"I know we've had this problem before, not all women do it, but you're right, it's hard to prove that you haven't and when you can, the damage is already done. Why did you just not wake me? I would have understood, I would have gone with you and put her straight, she needs some straight talking to and professional help, for the mental and drinking problems she has, and you need to stay away from her, understand?"

"You had spent an hour throwing up and needed sleep. I thought I could be back before you woke. Sorry I just didn't think, I just wanted to pick her up dump her at her hotel after telling her to stop it as she was affecting your health and that of my baby. I didn't know if you were still my fiancée, considering you had resigned, as manager, fiancée and friend." He had read the letter then. He continued to explain about the woman Harry. "She said you would pay too, she was going to tell you of our romance and that I had asked her to come to LA and we were to be married, until you came back pregnant and claiming the child was mine.

I argued with her on the phone earlier and told her to keep away from you. You were ill and didn't need any hassle. I put the phone down on her. Then she went to have a few for courage and phone you, but she had too many and passed out. Then I was called by the nightclub, to come collect my pregnant girlfriend, she had done it again, she had told them I was her fiancé and that she was pregnant. Penny I swear that is so not true. I haven't Baby I love you too much. I haven't been with anyone, not since I fell for you. She threatened to tell my bosses she and I were lovers and I dumped her when you showed up pregnant and she had lost our child because of the stress." I cannot believe she's so deranged, but heck that was bad, no wonder he was meeting her.

"I'd had enough of her crazy threats, then when I saw you this morning, so sick and angry again with me. I flipped and went to the club. I've made a complaint against her, telling them everything and she's about to be asked to resign with references or be sacked for sexual harassment. She wasn't too subtle, when she made passes at me and thank the lord it was noticed. As was my refusal of her advances, and my insistence, that my fiancée would not like it.

I can't and won't have you stressed out and worrying about my past, especially now. I told Mom too, she was such a big mistake, one I'm sorry I brought back into my life, because now she's affecting you and the health of the boy's. Please have you calmed down enough to forgive me? I really didn't do anything, and I don't want to give you any more worry?"

His face is full of stress, he leant in and I gave him a reason to smile, the nicest of kisses and hoped he liked it as much as I did. I pulled away and he pulled me back in for another, he was laid at my side on the bed giving me some much needed cuddles.

"So when I walked into legal, you knew I was facing your ex? Didn't you think she'd say anything? I could have used the heads-up Benjamin Lord, especially when coming face to face with your ex and doing battle with her. I knew she had it bad for you and telling her you were still my fiancé, was just to get a rise out of her. The baby though, telling her about her, him, them, you know the babies? I wanted her to know that I wasn't someone who you were just going to abandon. Plus, she pissed me off, besides she's so not your type anyway." He and I are on the bed, looking into each other's eyes, I love him so much it hurts.

"Correct on all counts, she would never be my type. My type of woman has to be cute and be British, with a sassy mouth, she needs to be able to tell me I'm an ass and tell me straight. I only know one person like that, and well she's going to be actually marrying me. If she knows what's good for her."

"Again, your proposal really sucked, you'd think you'd have learnt how to do it properly by now Ben. Try that proposal again, when you bring me a better reason. Try harder in getting me to change my mind and I may marry you if the reasons are good enough. Well other than, I'll marry you if I know what's good for me. Work on it and get back to me." He leant in for another kiss, getting these are more than enough reason.

Chapter 17:

Ben has had our dinner sent in from a restaurant, one recommended by the nurse. We sit and eat. Mine is the healthiest I've eaten whilst I've been here. A delicious vegetable soup, a poached salmon filet with steamed vegetables and fresh fruit cocktail. It tastes divine and Ben eats his, once he sees I'm eating, he has a lot of starch on his plate, and that baked potato looks so good, that I want one. Ben is really quiet as he eats, his hand is on my thigh through dinner, gently rubbing it and soothing me.

"Ben why did they ring you, the clubs she went in?" He smiled.

"She just lied, telling them I was her fiancé and gave them my number to ring. Some of the clubs we go in as a team and she tagged along. I usually was the one who helped her home, and I always made sure one of the lads came with me, they did get snapped with us though, isn't it funny they didn't use those pictures in the papers and as you know, being a well-mannered-man. I did as I was taught and was a gentleman. If I hadn't gone, it could have ended up splashed all over the papers, 'Ben Lord abandons pregnant girlfriend' I don't need to tell you how much I love the press. So, I went for her, picked her up and dumped her at her hotel, time after time, if you'd noticed the picture's I'm not happy.

However, given the bloody paparazzi were hounding me, I could see how you might miss the bad mood I was in. Last night though, she went too far and said some unkind words about the mother of my baby, saying you did it on purpose and you didn't get rid of it because you wanted my money. I flipped and came to tell you everything. I found the photos you'd printed, you wouldn't let me in, so I slept at the door, until I heard the smash of the glass and found you in a mess on the floor. I panicked, phoned the girls and Mom made sure you were being looked after, and then I went to sort her out. She was still passed out cold, when the club went to question her, she was still drunk, and she had emptied the mini bar too." He clears the plates and tells me to get in bed I need rest.

"I will do, if you lay at my side. I need to feel your calming breath on my neck Ben and be wrapped in your arms please?" He obliges, climbs on the bed and holds me tightly. Kissing my head, I settle for the night snuggled into him. I fall fast asleep within minutes. I wake up to use the toilet in the night and he's nowhere around. I use the toilet in my room, when I return, he's there, he's down on one knee and opens a box.

"Penelope Daniels; will you do me the great honour of marrying me, in the chapel of your choice, in Vegas? Please Penny say you will and make me the happiest man alive. I want to be able to see you every single day. I want to make love to you and only you every night. I want to sleep with you, holding in my arms until you sleep soundly and peacefully. You make me want to be better person, and I need to be with you and our children forever. We need to have more adventures Baby, after all what's life Penny, without a bit of an adventure?"

"I will yes but Ben, I don't need many more adventures though I've had more than enough adventures since being with you." He places the simple band of pink and white diamonds, next to my promise ring and wipes away a tear. He lies with me back on the bed as I sleep again. When I wake, the nurse is smiling down at him as he sleeps, she wakes him, as an examination is needed, he says he has to go pick someone up and will be straight back and to eat all my breakfast he's having sent in. He kisses me softly, as his tongue kisses mine I murmur I love him. When he gets back ages later, he's clean-shaven and changed. I smile as he bounds into my room, as the nurse un-straps the monitor and leaves us to it.

"I've a couple of days off with my fiancée and then we the nine of us are going to Vegas." Suzie is waiting by the door, she is brimming with happiness, she runs in and throws herself on my bed.

"I don't think my surprise is as big as these two. Daddy here, he can't stop gushing about his son's and their fantastic mother, who are you trying to kid? These are a fantastic surprise, oh Penny you're having a massive family." As she runs her hand across my stomach, she sighs. "You look fantastic, very brown and your hair is great, so what's the deal with the heart then? I know you were hurt when you said it was in a gazillion pieces because of the babies' daddy being an idiot?" Ben shuffles uneasily in his seat, as yet again, he's made the reason for my heart problems.

Ben knows and sighs as I hold his hand tighter and smile. "I tried to tell you every time you phoned that it was just his sister, Eve. He was so fucking pissed at his self, I hurt for him, but you bitch, you put the laptop to sleep. Had you seen the two page letter, you would have stopped home. You headstrong, stupid woman, but 'high I'm fine' is all you said, if I said any more the phone went down Penny Lane? I'm really pissed at you and as soon as you found out about being pregnant, you should have come home. Lecture over for a minute, my husband is waiting in the corridor. Can he come in too, he's pissed at you too and he has a tiny bit of bad news?" Danny saunters in looking sheepish. I know that look, he's dinged Miss Lexi because he did it to Albert, my Audi once.

"Well, I leave you two alone for a few weeks and you go and get married. Firstly, who are you playing for, secondly you better keep it strictly for Suzie and thirdly, what have you done to Lexi?" He looks shocked.

"Firstly, I'm not a player anymore. I'm a qualified football agent, working under my wife, it's a nice place to be, at my wife's beck and call. Secondly, my wife would have my balls in a very nice glass jar, if I ever cheat, which she bought for that sole purpose and it stands on the mantle at home. Thirdly, I didn't do anything, she was stolen Penny and she hasn't been found and the trackers off, so they don't know where to find her.

Funny thing is we had that problem when she went to Europe with a crazy person behind the wheel. The insurance has agreed to pay out. Sorry Pen, but she was stolen from the garage too, so not my fault and can you please tell Suzie that I pleaded with you to stop and told you he was a complicated guy, who would wake up and be pissed." Suzie ranted at me again as Ben was still sat on the bottom of my bed smiling.

"Anyway, Miss Daniels three words isn't good enough, and when I tell you to come home I mean it, how dare you put the phone down on me after three words and when I then rang back the rude French 'gentleman' I spoke to asked me what colour my panties were, refusing to run and get you. Seriously Penny Lane, what's with the heart, you're healthier than anyone I know?" I try to reassure her I'm fine. Ben shows them the scan pictures of Boo number one and two, as the nurse comes in and asks that they leave whilst they run some tests.

They go for coffee and though Ben doesn't want to leave, he does. I'm just back from having a sonogram done of my heart and they are all waiting by my bedside, heck I feel loved. Dr West comes in grinning and I see nothing, but good news written all over his face.

"Miss Daniels, you can go home other than high blood pressure and stress, your heart is fine and is a remarkably healthy heart. Though you need to be watched whilst this sickness is still a problem, the vomiting probably caused you to go weak and you suffered some light headedness, which led you to pass out, so stay away from the stodgy and crappy foods and you should be fine.

When you run, walk or do any exercise you need someone with you and though I encourage your fitness regime, can you perhaps cut the number of runs down and the length? You can get dressed and go home. Keep your appointments with Dr Marcie and Dr Andrews, just relax and enjoy your pregnancy Miss Daniels."

"So, she's good to go?" I smile because I know what Ben mean by good to go.

"Yes, keep your exercise to a minimum and she's good to go home and relax." Ben and I went home, on our own.

Suzie and Dan were in the Lowes Hotel, just up the road and are using Bens car for a while. The girls and Mom were heading back to pack. As we pulled up, Ben inputs the code, we drive in and I'm carried to our room and placed in bed, to rest. I'd done nothing but rest, all I wanted was for him just to hold me again, because I needed the closeness. As he made a series of phone calls, I fell asleep, then when I awoke there was no panic this time, he was holding on to me tightly and clung on to me like a limpet.

"Good evening beautiful, considering you didn't need sleep you've been asleep all afternoon. We need to get you something to eat, and Mom has done dinner at home are you alright if we go around to hers?"

"I need the toilet and to freshen up, but yes give me a minute." He picked me up and placed me on the toilet stood, turned and waited for me to finish. I wanted privacy, but he quoted doctors' orders, and I had no choice, because he wasn't for leaving. I finished up with him stood behind me. Laughing, as I sulked.

"We, Milady have to be careful and keep your stress to a minimum so shush, no arguing, I want to be in here." His fingers were massaging my sex, and my hands wrapped around his neck. I needed him and now.

"I missed you too." Making love to me slowly and gently wasn't what Penny ordered I wanted the passion we had in New York, but we had to take it nice and easy, with no stress and I had to be calm, well for now we had to be, but lying in his arms after we were reacquainted, I knew I didn't want to be anywhere else. After a pleasant meal at their home, I sat in their cosy family lounge and listened to tales of Ben as a child, the photo albums are brought out, and the embarrassing pictures looked over. They looked such a happy family, the holidays they had were amazing. I smiled as Ben watched Mom, who had her arm around me all the time and as she showed me a certain picture a memory would trigger, and we would have tears.

"How about we call the boys Douglas after Suzie's dad, my adoptive father, and David after your father Ben?" He smiled and said that would be wonderful. Mom liked the idea too, after I explained about the hate I felt for my own father, and I was happy that the boys had good names, it all felt so right. Ben and I headed for home, I again slept in the car driving back and Ben carried me to bed.

I woke in the morning and I could hear him laughing in the lounge, so I had a shower and changed. I walked down the stairs to the sounds of loud talking and plenty of hustle and bustle in the lounge. I had walked in on total pandemonium. The girls were here along with Mom, Suzie, Dan, Ben and a whole load of people and I had no idea who they were?

They all stopped and looked at me, there were boxes and boxes of stuff everywhere. I smiled it was my stuff and the strangers were deliverymen. All this mess was in fact, all my things from home. My films, clothes, shoes all my bedroom and house were here in Ben's lounge and they were busy unpacking it all. Dan had found the stuff Garth had made me pack away, my fancy undies and he put them in Ben's room. Wise move on his part not routing through it, there were a few things in there a mother shouldn't see. Eve loved my shoe collection, and what a surprise, we all wore the same size. I have sisters now borrowing my stuff, at last.

"What the... Ben when did you organized all this, this is everything from the flat, and my room?" My face was one big massive smile.

"Suzie had all your things sent from storage and had your room completely packed and I sent the delivery guys for it all, I wanted your things here with you, so you felt at home." I just slumped on the nearest empty spot and watched as they sorted out the boxes.

"Well, I guess I'm stopping here then?" The girls were speechless at my DVD collection, as Ben said they would be.

I had a whole load of chick flicks and we now needed a new shelving unit for all Ben's trophies and things, his old one it is now home to the best girl film collection here in LA, my new sisters love it. Ben watches as I sit and sort through my stuff, this was the nicest surprise in forever, well since seeing the two blue lines and the cuddling babies on a black and white screen. The rest of the boxes are put in my old room for me to sort through, but my photos and favourite things were here and on display. Ben had made this place, his place, my home. Mom was looking through a few of the old family albums, the pictures Ben had spent the night looking at. She smiled at the pictures of a young Penny. It had taken ages to sort through and shift poor Ben's things around.

"Penny Daniels is now home, thank you. Ben, you really are so good at surprising me." Suzie and Dan had slipped off after a couple of hours, to check out the city as this had turned into their honeymoon. "Ben I'm starving can we take everyone to dinner?" He smiled.

"What's saying then we leave this and go and get my girls something to eat, and as we have to be in bed early, because we drive to Las Vegas first thing in the morning, because we have a wedding to attend." I really am speechless and for me that takes some doing.

Ben makes dinner reservations at a fancy steak restaurant and after everyone changes, we head there for a fantastic family meal. I loved it, the food was excellent and the company better. I ate well and healthily Ben made sure I ate well. I wasn't allowed crappy food. Suzie looked really happy with Dan and watching her and Dan together, I was so happy he asked Ben to get me over here to help him. As I watch the family chat, laugh and eat, it was wonderful, and I had at last a family. Tomorrow they would be my proper family. We finished dinner and went our separate ways home and Ben smiled.

"Did you enjoy tonight?" I hung off his arm as he walked me to the car.

"I did Ben it was a nice day and such a surprise, seeing all my boxes thank you. We need a house with a garden though." He smiled.

"We will work on finding the perfect home for you and the babies when we get back Milady, we need a massive garden and a whole load of bedrooms. I want a house full of kids with you."

"Well let me get these two out and running around first. I love the idea of a big back yard with grass, a big kitchen and room for more children eventually. We can look at houses when I get back. I've to go to New York in a couple of days Ben. I've just signed a commission cheque over to the 'The Amy Lord School.' They are opening the sensory gardens too, they sound wonderful from the descriptions I get when I ring them, apparently, your friend has pulled out all the stops with the garden, they are beautiful, and the headmistress loves them. They would like you to open them?" He looked shocked.

"Amy Lord is my cousin's daughter's name?"

"I know, but they wanted to rename the school after me, as they did very well from my commission, but I remembered how you were so in awe of your little cousin, when you spoke of her that day. It made me so happy watching you talk about her. So, I thought why not, she has been offered a place at the school, which will be great for her, I didn't realise they lived so close. I would love to meet them all?"

"They live in Orange County, Dad's family all come from there. Dad was only here in LA because he met Mom here and never went home again, I think that's what lead me to New York, so I could be near where he grew up, but it brought you to me instead." I smiled.

"They don't know anything about it yet, it's being done when we get there. Will you be able to go Ben? It's all been rushed through and I only answered my emails when I got back from Europe."

"Not a problem Milady, they are going to be so pleased with it, her mom and dad are wonderful people, and you will love them. You would have met them in February, they were all coming for the non-wedding, did you not realise it was Valentine's day Baby? Yes, I know I messed up. I don't need to be reminded of what an ass I was." He held me close as I kissed his chin. I missed my Valentine's day wedding, crap, it was...

"Take me home, are we really getting married tomorrow in a drive through?"

"We are yes, the same one Mom and Dad went to, it will take mere minutes and then we are married." Why did I think he was hiding stuff, he had shocked the hell out of me today, what's betting there's more shocks in store for me tomorrow? As we pulled up to the condominium, the gate was open. Ben looked worried and he told me to stay in the car, I did as I was told, and as we pulled up security were already there.

"Your silent alarm was tripped Mr Lord. We were about to check. Stay in the car and we will do a walk through, please keep your wife in the car." I smiled and said I would stay put, Ben was about to head up the steps.

"Ben please come and sit with me, I don't like the feeling I'm getting, and I'm not feeling too well either." I didn't want him running in and getting hurt, he climbed back in the car.

"What's the matter Penny are you alright?" I just climbed on his knee as we waited for the guards to clear the house. They came out and asked me to stay where I was, but they needed to show Ben the scene. I panicked, what's happening? Ben followed them up after they assured me there was no danger to Ben, but there was something up there, something I didn't need to see, so I did as I was asked. I'm in shock when an ambulance and two police cars, pulled in behind our car. Ben came down and he looked pale, he was not looking too well at all.

"I don't want you to go up Baby, Harry has done something stupid and you don't need to see it, so I'm taking you to Mom's and coming back to get some things, alright?" He looked shocked, so I didn't argue.

He got in and drove me to Moms. I was rushed in as Terri was told what had happened. I was shown to Ben's room by Eve, where a massive golden retriever jumped straight at me, when the door was opened, and licked my face. Terri left with Ben, whilst the girls made supper, why was nobody talking to me. I was worried, all I knew Harry had done something stupid. Like what, wrecked the house and was drunk in the lounge? Oh no worse than that, they'd sent an ambulance and a police car, had she tried to kill herself? My mind was running through the what ifs, when suddenly all bad thoughts are banished, as the lucky bitch that had Ben's kisses before me, jumps on the bed and washes my face, just as Eve and Fran come to give me some of their night clothes.

"Miss Goldie, I presume, come here girl you are so cute." I'm licked to near death, the girls tried to get her of me, but I loved it as she was running a mock, in the back yard when I had been here before, in case she did me damage. I had never ever had a pet and she was wonderful. Ben would be back as soon as possible, and I'm shown where things were and told to get a bath and then get into the pyjamas on the bed.

The twins are so bossy, but I do as I am told, and relax in Ben's tub. I did too, and I had the hottest and most relaxing bath in a while and I had a poke around his bedroom, it's a big boy pad, and with the dog in tow, I went to sit with the rest until Ben came back. He'd brought an overnight bag with him when he returned, and he looked awful. Terri too looked shocked and mad.

"Ben please, you're scaring me what happened?" He sat me on his knee and explained the horror, which the poor security guards had found on entering his bedroom and on his bed.

"Harry was in your wedding gown. She'd written a suicide note and had taken her own life. I don't even know how she got in the bloody house, but she had tripped the silent alarm. I changed the security code yesterday, so all I can think is that she only knew the old one that was on file at work, and it let her in, but the intruder alarm sounded at the head office. She has slashed all your clothes and stunk of booze, she had taken a hand full of pills, the paramedics said she'd been dead a while, the coroner said she chocked on her own vomit, she was far too drunk to turn over. I thought she was still in the hospital Penny and getting help?" I was in total shock.

"Oh, how awful for those poor men, are you alright Ben?"

"She left a suicide note, blaming you for ruining her life Penny it was written by a deranged mad, sick, woman. I never said I would marry her, and I didn't promise her anything, she said I had jilted her for you. Penny it was awful, hell she needed help and I got her the sack. Did I drive her to this Penny is all this because of me?" He cried. I didn't know how to handle this. This was awful, Terri was telling the girls things as I tried to calm down Ben.

"Shush, everything will be fine, come on get in bed you've had a hell of a shock, are the poor guards alright?"

"They deal with shit like this all the time apparently, I have to go to the police station and be questioned in the morning and I think under the circumstance we'd better call the wedding off. I'm sorry Baby but I will make it up to you, I promise." He had tears in his eyes again.

"We can get married any time Ben, I'm not leaving you, we can get married in your mom's church here in a few weeks, have the big event she wanted?" She smiled as I led him to his room. "I don't want you to blame yourself for any of this. She had deep emotional problems, if she needed to be drunk all the time. I'm sorry to say this, but I've no compassion for anyone who can waste their lives so selfishly, when so many fight tooth and nail for theirs, then are mean enough to leave strangers to clean up their messes.

She was confused in the head. She has left you to deal with all her crap, she was unthinkably selfish, but she was sick Ben you couldn't help her. As to blaming me, that's fine because I know I've done nothing wrong and neither did you. I don't know why she felt the need to destroy my clothes. They are easily replaced but wearing my wedding dress was very deranged and something which must have been hard for you to see?" I'm dithering because he's so sad and confused, me I'm just angry.

His mother fights for every day for life and she was a young woman, all be it she was a messed-up woman, who had thrown her life away, and what for, attention? We would have seen to it she got help to sort out her head and helped her get right again, hell it was such a waste, a pitiful waste of a young life.

"Penny the press will have a field day with this. They will find out the leaches get everywhere Baby." He was right, there would be in a feeding frenzy over this one, so we need to be well prepared or ideally not here for them to pester?

"We will be ready Ben. I do wonder if she had a family, do you know?" He laughed.

"She has a mom called Donna and sister called Judy, but they don't speak. During our talks, she told me the sorrowful tail of them abandoning her, it turned out she had slept with Judy's new husband and poor Judy was so upset about it, she lost their baby. Harry couldn't see why it was her fault. She didn't drag him to bed, he went willingly, but he was allowed to stay, yet she was the one who had to leave? I knew then she had more than a few shingles missing from the roof. I am so sorry for bringing her into our lives Penny." I held him tightly as he clung on to me for dear life.

"She messed their lives up to, her poor family, they are clearing up after her too. Have you told the police about them?"

"No, I didn't need to. She'd left a nasty note for them too. She was a piece of work, a nasty piece of work. She blamed her skank of a sister Judy for making more out of the situation and just being a drama queen. She told her she hoped she never had another baby and she wanted Donna to die a painful death, the husband, she said would cheat again. Men like him needed to be screwed properly and she didn't have it and never would. I even told them not to give it to them, it was awful." I held him as he cried into my shoulder and then slept.

Chapter 18:

Terri did all the ringing around in the morning, as Ben slept in, she was busy cancelling hotel rooms and a wedding ceremony. Apparently, he had booked the Bellagio Hotel and we were to be married there in a lavish wedding ceremony. There were now two failed Ben weddings, I'd laugh if it weren't so sad. I phoned Suzie and told her the wedding was off and why, they would call around later. I made breakfast for the family and went for a walk with Goldie along the beach road. I was still in shock at her stupidity. Ben was still sleeping as I left, he was so upset in the night and hadn't had a restful sleep, he was still blaming himself for her suicide.

I'd walked a long way when I finally realized I'd been out ages. I turned to walk back, with Goldie by my side. She was now enjoying the beach, on the way back, running into the waves and bringing the stupid stick for me to throw, repeatedly. She was sorely disappointed, as I didn't pitch it as far as her master, so she didn't have quite as good a run. Ben met me halfway back along the beach. Relived he'd found me at last, he looked so cool in his shorts and bare feet, the wife beater, the sunglasses and the baseball cap, finished off the college kid look he had going on, my God I had never seen him looking so damn sexy.

"Milady left me, are you alright?" His arm coming into catch my waist, he petted Goldie, who was tired from her walk, but she was still able to give her master a sloppy kiss, lucky Goldie.

"I am now you're smiling again, are you alright? Goldie and I are bonding. She loves walking, I like her already." Goldie was giving Ben some of her famous kisses. They are more face washes than kisses, this I found out when she wanted out of the room in the night.

"Come on, I've got to be at the police station to give statements, luckily the news didn't catch this one and there's been nothing in the papers or on the television. The club needs to get the heads up on all this, so I said you would help if they needed it, you will, won't you? I don't need the bad publicity Penny, especially if the news gets out, we were an item for a while?"

"I'll help the club if I need to and of course I'll help you it's what I'm here for, to support you and be by your side, through thick and thin, in good and bad Ben."

We arrived home to a mass of news crews, it seems he'd spoken too soon, and they were invading his poor mom's front yard. I called for security to control them, as they were baying for blood and a damned story. One security guard was to be sacked for letting them all in. They paid him handsomely to get in, and he would pay with his job, several of Ben's neighbours had complained, the housing security and police were moving them on after the bloody press conference we now had to do.

"It seems the news got out Ben." We dashed past them and into Mom's house. She'd emailed her suicide note to a news station. I watched as the news helicopter flew over Ben's house, live on television. My god they were so close, the news flash at the bottom of the television said, 'ex-lover of Ben 'Lordie' Lord was discovered by his new wife, as they returned home from celebrating their marriage. The ex-lover is thought to have been the head of the Lions legal team, Harriet Trent, though sources are yet to confirm or deny this.' I made a quick phone call as Ben sat and watched as the nightmare unfold.

I spoke to the club and they wanted me to handle talking to the press, and to say she had left the club to take up a new job offer. I agreed and started to put a statement together. An hour later Ben and I gave a short press conference, stating that Ben and she had been intimate three years ago for just three short weeks, ending when he had to take a restraining order out on her, for her stalking, mentioning too that Ben was again having to do it here as she was being a pest both in and out of work.

Telling them too that she was offered private medical care to help her get straight, from the club, who were more than willing to see her through any programs she needed to get well again. She had refused all help, as she done all her life, she didn't need it she told her poor mother. Had she got the help she needed perhaps things would have been different. Unfortunately refusing all help from everyone, she was more disturbed as the years went on. We asked they leave her family alone, as they too were upset that she had caused them yet more heartbreak.

We answered a few questions, no, they were never engaged. I was asked did I feel responsible in any way for her death. I looked at the woman and I said no, I had been Ben's fiancée before he moved back to LA, and she was deluded even when Ben told her he was engaged she didn't believe him, and then threatened to blackmail him and to tell the press she was pregnant. They jumped on the claims she was pregnant, a killer allegation to prove otherwise, we were angry as Bens good name was being needlessly dragged through the mud. Poor Ben was distraught.

"I would like to point out, that that is just a vindictive lie on Miss Trent's part, she knew the onus would be on Ben to prove otherwise. Ladies and gentlemen of the press it's a sad fact that women do these things, and the truth is we will never know why she said it, but it's just a baseless lie of a deranged sad and drunken woman, who was jealous of the fact that Ben and I are having babies of our own and this was her counter strike, it was nothing more and nothing less, than she was just angry with me that I am carrying Ben's children and not her." We were inundated with more questions.

We told them of her repeated lies at being pregnant, about the lies told to various nightclub doormen, about him having to take her back to the lobby of her hotel, never her room, the staff there taking her to her rooms and all on security cameras too, and on more than one occasion. We had to, as they had dug all the photos of her with him stumbling out of the clubs over the past three months, but as we pointed out on all the occasions baring the last one it was with other team members.

Our statement was short and the questions shorter. We asked them for privacy, we also asked them to respect her family's need for privacy too, as we all needed to get to grip with her actions and her unfounded lies. The police then escorted them off the estate. I had decided we needed to get away from here and had booked a jet to take the family to New York. Clearing it with the club and booking rooms for us all at the Plaza. I emailed them confirmation, and I told them of Goldie's impending arrival too, as my new girl was coming too. The girls packed their things for a couple of days away, all when Ben was at the police station. When he got back, I had packed the few things we had. We would need to shop when we got there thanks to Harry I had next to nothing left.

Suzie and Dan were meeting us at the plane. I wanted to surprise Ben for a change, so after several phone calls and with the help of Terri, we were set for a short vacation. As Ben arrived home, our lift was pulling up. Bags, family and dog are put into the cars. A still in shock Ben went with the flow, too tired to argue and too surprised to say anything. Our cars drove us straight through to the plane, which was already and waiting for us, Suzie and Dan having already arrived and were waiting on the jet as we got there.

"The club has agreed to a week off and you need to relax now, let me do some of what I'm good at for a change?" He looked pleased, as he watched his sisters and his mom as they are looking around the plane, they and Goldie were all so excited. Goldie has never flown before either, so this should be interesting, because I hadn't quite thought that one through. It's not as if she can poop in the private jet, though I do have puppy training pads and a few newspapers and poop bags, I'm not totally stupid. So Ben ran her around the airport green bits. He got back dog on empty and at last had a smile on his face, crisis averted. We were in the air minutes after Ben had taken his seat and had fastened a tired Goldie in the chair.

"Milady, as ever you blow me away, where are we going? Anywhere has to be better than here right now. Are you alright Mom, is all the stress getting to you?" Stress, she was sipping chilled Moet and eating a large bowl of strawberry's, which were actually meant for a treat for Ben, a mid flight sexy snack, but she saw them and wanted a bowl full, who am I to say no? We will have to have them at the hotel. She is smiling, laughing and thoroughly loving it.

"No Son, all this is wonderful and is actually really quite exciting, though I may need to have a nap, is that alright Penny?"

"Yes, there are two bedrooms on here Ben, show Mom to the bedroom and get her comfortable. I need to send some emails and return some phone calls." Goldie went with them and slept on the bed with her. Had the girls really never seen four weddings and a funeral? So, they were watching that, with popcorn and wine. Suzie and Dan went for a 'nap' in the other room. When Ben came back, he sat in front of me and told me to kick of my shoes and pass him my feet. Oh yes, they were given the best massage ever. I watched him as he watched his sisters then looking at me, he smiled.

"How did I get so lucky Penny? Last week I was so miserable and now, wow, I've got you back, I have a Mom who is overjoyed at being a Grandma and my sisters are in love with you. Thank you, it's all down to you getting your cute arse back to your stupid arse of a fiancé and bringing those babies you carry to meet their same dumb arse Daddy, I really don't deserve all this."

"I'll remind you of that when they need changing or feeding in the night Ben. Now shush keep making my feet feel loved that's so nice, I've plans to make and people to email, whilst I remember, the family apartment block needs you to do a walk through, you said you didn't want publicity for that is, that, right?"

"I don't want any publicity Milady, the other apartment block is for the vets, I've had a doctor's office put in too, some of the guys, they have a lot of issues to deal with, and I hired Stevie as the building supervisor. I'm keep up with the building work and I'm really proud of what they have done. The family block can house up to sixty families, and there are five ground floor apartments for disabled families, as well as a few apartments for the larger families. The yard too has a fantastic garden and it has a full playground in there, it really cleaned up well. The first families move in, in two weeks. A big one too, a Mom, Dad and six kids plus three grandparents, they lost everything in a fire and their landlord sold their home to a developer, turning it into high end condominiums, for rich ass people like me. You Penny changed everything the day you stepped into my life."

"I didn't do anything that wasn't there already, and you did the apartment thing all on your own that was mind blowing what you did, as to rich ass, it's a mighty generous and fine ass, one I intend to have in my hands later, Ben." He winked, as his fingers relived my stress through my feet, who knew it was so erotic...

"I can't wait to see the school. What are the plans for today Penny, I need a rest when we get to the hotel, I'm a little tired and you look a little in need of sleep?" I'm on a promise, whoop hell yeah. The grin said it all, our great minds thinking in the same way...

"We are having a meal at the froufrou place the girls and Mom like, their favourite place. You may want a steak ordered for supper though." He laughed and pulled me in for a kiss.

"This was just what we needed Penny, when is the school thing happening?"

"We have to be there at seven tomorrow evening, it's in the garden and its black tie formal, so I get to ogle my man again in Armani. I hope he's going commando again, I quite liked dishing out the last punishment for doing that particular thing."

"I think I can oblige my fiancée on that one. I quite like the err, punishment my fella got, for breaking the Armani code." He made me blush again. Five hours later and everything I need to do has been done and the limos are meeting us by the plane. I've ordered Ben and I clothes to replace the ones ruined, and they will be in the suite when we get there. I've booked a table at the girl's favourite froufrou restaurant and we are going to have an early night, I've a big day planned tomorrow.

After we arrived, we settled into the room, we might have fooled around a little, okay a lot! We then changed for dinner. We went out to eat drink and be merry. Ben and I take Goldie for a run when we get back, before we too have an early night, everyone needed one. The honeymooners went for a night out, I did wonder if they would end up at the college bar? Our early night turned out to be not so early for us as we made up for the lost time, several times. We slept well, with our bodies locked together exhausted and thoroughly exercised.

Ben and I had got back from jogging with Goldie in the park, both of us safely guarded by Ben. I met Henry too and what a nice man he is and quite the philosopher, he's fond of Ben and is considering Bens offer of a summer in LA. He says he will let him know. I suspect he won't come, as he has his rituals, he has agreed to stop in the vets' shelter if the weather is inclement. We said goodbye and continued the run. I hit that road again, the last time for me here was not a happy time, and we jog by it and finish the run. I'm happy and sweaty when we get back.

We shower together and yes, it was nice. Breakfast was eaten after the very sexy shower. My rampant hormones have set in and my fiancée is very pleased to help out with those particular needs. After which, I go to the girl's rooms and tell them the hair salon is expecting them at four, and we are going dress shopping in an hour. I need a wedding dress, and they need dresses too, everyone screams, and Mom is happy.

"Ben isn't the only one who can throw a surprise wedding together, but shush he thinks we're just going to Amy's school, which we are, but were going to be married in Ben's garden, all David's family are coming too, that's alright isn't it? I know you were hoping for a family wedding at home, but I figured this would be the perfect place. When Ben first saw the school, he was taken aback, and the plans he made whilst he was there, were amazing.

They have built a large gazebo in the far end of the garden and we are to be married in that. I hope that will be alright Eleanor? I just want to make it perfect and special for him. He's done so much for me and they do say the third ones a charm, so fingers crossed please?" With Terrie's help I'd invited some key player, and they were on the next jet from LA and then two more surprises were on their way too, my plans were coming together. We just need to keep it secret from Ben.

"I can't think of anything nicer, his father's family are wonderful. They don't get to LA very much, so this will be perfect. You and Ben are going to be so happy, he really isn't such a bad boy, just a horse's arse sometimes, but little lady you have changed him for the better. He will be such a good father and husband, he learnt from a good man."

"His Mom's not too bad either, right order breakfast, I've to let Suzie in on the secret and we will go shopping after breakfast, see you all in a while."

Ben and Dan's suits arrived last night and were already hanging in the closets. Along with things for today, I knocked on for Suzie and told them what was happening. Dan wondered what the posh suit was for. He's not too good at secret keeping or he wasn't. Miss Daniels is nearly organized. I meet the surprise guests and they are shown to their suites. I give them their instructions, and the time of their car's arrivals, they are to meet us there. I go to our rooms, as Ben is coming out of the shower butt naked, and wow déjà vu, thank you Mr Lord.

"Oh, the things I could do to that body Mr Lord."

"The things you have my fella doing now see, he wants to play."

"I can spare him a half hour! All my plans are finished and he's so needy." I push him onto the bed and as he pulls me on top of him, he smiles. "Wow, you're such a bad boy Ben, really the doctor ordered me to take it easy, and we aren't, are we?"

"Fuck easy, I need you Baby and I need you badly. I want to make love to you and now." He pulled me down to meet his lips. His kisses were passionate with his tongue searching out mine. I removed my dress, as he ripped of another perfectly nice pair of silky knickers, bugger he'd ruined too many of my sets. He still owes me lord knows how many pairs from last time we were here.

"Ben, we have to be somewhere in half an hour and argh..." He smiled and as he slipped inside me, he wears me out with his passion and stamina "Ben, this gets better all the time, um..."

"Milady, you say the nicest things, now shush you're so nice to be inside of Baby." As he moved within me, he touched me as only he could, the pleasure building to my first orgasmic high of many. "Oh hell Baby, when you come, you do it so well. You're so tight around my fella and he loves it, argh Baby hold it, hell Penny hold it." I came again and this time for longer and shaking under him. "Milady is making me come, argh Baby relax. Please argh. So fucking tight, yes Baby tighter, Baby tighter, oh God yesss." He called my name and as he emptied himself into me, he shook and collapsed spent, holding my sweaty and crying face in his hands, he kissed me and smiled. "You Milady, you have managed to turn me into a sex toy for your own pleasure, and I love it and the fact you didn't go off sex. I read on-line women either hate sex or can't get enough, thankfully you can't get enough Baby, because I've a whole lot more to give you." As he held me tightly in his arms, I'm too tired to move. He's wearing me out, with the energy he manages to drain from me when we make love and I just hope I can give him everything he needs. Well, that will be his last lot of sex as a single man, tonight he will be making love to a married woman. I smile as he asks what has made me laugh.

"I was just thinking I don't enjoy sex anymore, I may have to have the next four months off, I read that in a book too." He smiled and tickled me as I ran for the much-needed shower. "Seriously Ben, you need to get your sweaty backside in here, you have to go to the site in an hour and I'm going shopping. I need clothes and so does Mom and the girls. Will she be alright?

"Yes, since you have been in my life, she has a new lease on life, when she had her nap in the cabin on the plane, she said she felt like she could live forever. We had a few tears and she's had a clear test back yesterday, so fingers crossed, she will be around for a few years of our son's life. Will you take my cards Milady let me pay, and yes, I know you have your own money, but you need clothes because of me?"

"Ben I would have needed new clothes anyway, your sons have big feet and heads like their Daddy, and I was struggling to get some of them on any way. I really have more than enough money Ben. I'm sort of a rich lady and I've more than enough."

"When you marry me, all this disobedience will stop, you will take my money and be a kept woman, you will be barefoot and pregnant in our kitchen cooking something fancy for your man, when he gets home from a hard game of ball. You will cook, clean, raise my children, service my fella and worship at my feet."

"And then?" I smile as he knows he's in for an arse whooping.

"I bloody wake up, and smell the coffee, you're nobody's slave and hell I love the fact you're not in this for the money Baby, and like you would ever do all those willingly, but take the cards please?" I agree to use them, he is sulking because I refused them, and it isn't worth the hassle.

"Oh I don't know? I quite like the barefoot and pregnant bit, because that would mean we have to have sex a lot. I'll always need your fella, but more so the big fella who comes, excuse the pun, with him and I need him ready to make me happy and serviced, to perfection. I want loads of kids Ben loads, so your fella and you are going to be busy for a fair few year's churning out grandbabies for Mom to spoil."

"Haven't you got some shopping to do?" He said, and laughed as I talked, and as I talked, he got ready for action again, great, more from the little fella, attached to the big fella and we're ready for more shower fun.

"Um, after we have sex again, because I suddenly see your fella's ready for water party perhaps, Ben? More shower sex and you, perfect." After a quick rush to dress I meet the girls in the lobby and we head down Fifth Avenue, we hit Saks, Armani, Abercrombie and Fitch. I was enjoying this shopping trip, but I wasn't sure about wedding rings, so after asking Terri, she smiled.

"He has them with him all the time, he's had them in a little red velvet bag in his breast pocket since the night you first left. He even wears them when he has a game, they never leave his person." I didn't need to get rings then. Mom and the girls had their clothes and she needed rest, so Suzie and I went in search of a gown. Carolina Herrera had the perfect gown. I didn't want anything like the Vera Wang dress that was in the bag, so I went for a full gown and the works. The first one I tried on was the first one I bought. I had just picked up the fabulous Jimmy's from his store here, so we were set, and I made a quick call to Ben.

"Hi Ben, were you, right now?"

"I, Milady am having a steak dinner, why what were you doing Penny, you can sure shop. Mom was back ages ago. I was back early and expecting some of your excellent afternoon loving?"

"I'm on my way back I needed to get more than them, and more stuff to make myself fancy for my man sexy."

"Um, I'd like that too. I'll see you back at the hotel in twenty minutes Baby, we have a busy night, I need to get showered and changed they need to do some publicity shots with Oscar for the magazine. Dan and I need to be there a little earlier than you, will you be alright with Mom and the girls?"

"Yes Ben, I'll see you soon I'm just pulling into the hotel now." I placed my gown in Suzie's room. Then carried my bags through to our room, I'd spent a small fortune today. Ben came in the room looking like that walking advert for sex again.

"Have you left anything in the shops Milady? Mom had a good time and the girls say she looks nice in her nice new dress. Did you get all you needed?" He lay on the bed at my side.

"Yes, Ben I got lots, I got pregnant lady clothes too, because this is going to get bigger."

"We really need to getting ready Penny, but hell, woman of mine, you are looking so damn fine, come here I want to fuck you hard, because damn Baby, I need me some of that and now. What perfume have you on? I can't get enough of you, did you wash in some sort of sex drug whilst you were on your travels because since you got back, all my party package wants to do it party with you?" I laughed because I was about to be made late for my hair appointment.

Wow the man has a real need for sex. He's grinning like an idiot as he gets his way for yet more party time, he's wearing me out in a good way. He showered and changed again. He looked so damned hot I could marry a man like that, oh wait I am doing, lucky ole me.

"Benjamin Lord, you aren't wearing your undies under the suit, you do know that carries a stiff penalty?" He laughs as he transfers his things from his pocket, and I notice the little ring pouch is transferred too. I grab him a hanky and as I put it in his top pocket, and he leans down for a kiss.

"I'll see you in a couple of hours Penny, we may need to hijack a supply closet. Do you think they will miss us? Penny don't be late and don't go anywhere on your own promise me? In fact, I will wait for you. Last time you went out alone you flew back to England and before that you were taken from me."

"Ben, I'll be fine, I promise you I'm not going anywhere alone here. I'm going to get my hair done, with Suzie and then dressed and then in a limo with the girls and Mom. I'll see you soon, look for a comfy place I may need some calming down when I get there." He reluctantly left me and went to get Dan, at last. I had a quick shower and went to the salon, joined there by Suzie. This was the closest we had been to actually, getting ourselves married, and fingers crossed we are.

"Suzie this is bloody nerve wrecking, I don't think I can do this again. Have I thanked you enough for daring me to get on that bloody plane yet?"

"If you hadn't Dan wouldn't have come back to England, so I thank you too." Finally. I was manicured and my hair is done, so now to get dressed and all with half an hour to spare. I went to Suzie's room. After a hell of a lot of fifing and fussing around, I was done, dressed and in a very beautiful gown.

"Well, let's get this show on the road, the minister can't be kept waiting."

"You look like... Well, really pretty Penny and I swore I wasn't going to cry, but who's giving you away?" Right on cue a knock on the door.

"Thomas, thank you for coming, are you alright Aunty Pippa?" I was hugged by a very happy Thomas. He looked so grown up in his Armani, he is dressed to match Ben and Dan. He is looking so much better than the last time I saw him.

"Penny you look lovely the rest of the family are downstairs, and the cars are all here and your flowers are down there too."

"Thank you, Aunt Pippa, you're quiet Thomas, are you alright?" He gives me another hug.

"You look like our Queen in that pretty dress and thank you I like my suit. Aunty Pip says I'm going to break a lot of girl's hearts when I get older, but Ben says that's wrong, I should always be good and never do that to a lady. He didn't say he was getting married yesterday, when we talked on Skype, but don't worry, I'm good at keeping secrets. The football shirts are fantastic Penny. They cover the whole of the walls in my room. When I showed them to Ben, he said he was very jealous, all he got back from your holiday were the babies. He laughed so much when I said I got the best present ever."

"Come on then Thomas, it's time for me to marry your adoptive brother, best we make an honest man of him this time?" He held my arm as his Aunty Pippa used her tissues.

"Never did I expect my little boy to look so good looking."

"Aunty Pip, I'm not your little boy, I'm a man, and please stop crying or we will be late." He made me laugh as he pouted like a little boy, whatever their age boys like to sulk. We rode down in the lift together, where we were met in the lobby by the girls and Mom, who were beyond excited.

"Not one of you is to say anything to make me cry, Thomas here has already had us in tears." We did the quick introductions and the flowers given to everyone.

I was ready at last. The ride to the school was loud as the girls were chatting. Aunty Pippa and Mom talked. Thomas though was really quiet, but he held on to my hand tightly all the way there. He stroked Goldie with the other and she sat and licked his face, which made him smile. I placed the letter that I'd written for Ben in the little cream silk bag and with a pink bow tied it around Goldie's neck. I just had to hope she plays her part properly. They all got out and went to join the party. I got out with Thomas and Goldie, Suzie phoned Dan and told him Goldie was on her way, I told Goldie to go find Ben, and she did what she does best, and ran to find Ben, I hope she goes straight there. Dan had his phone on.

"Goldie? Where the hell is Penny? What's this on your neck?" I listen as he takes the letter from the pouch. Thank God she got there...

"Will you please marry me? I got a fancy for my man dress, want to see it?" Dan has their flowers passed to them, and I hear him say hell yes and his mother cries. He then spots the minister and the judge and laughs loudly.

"We are all set Penny, but your husband-to-be is crying like a girl." Eve is laughing at Ben. The minister makes his way to the front of the gathered friends and family.

"Please rise as the Bride makes her way out." I'm frightened now, Aunty Pippa joins the party and Suzie goes next. Thomas takes my arm.

"Come on then, Penny let's get you to Ben, I think he's had a cry for long enough now. You look really pretty big sis, are you ready?" I can't remember when Ben and I became honorary siblings, but I like the sound of it. I nod as the music plays.

"Hello Eric and thank you for playing at my wedding." Thomas looks at me and then smiles as he sees Ben's face. The music plays Mr Clapton's blue eyes blue he serenades Thomas and I, as we walk down the aisle to my waiting fiancé. His tears have stopped, and Moms have started, and aren't for stopping either. I get to him and he grabs me for the longest of kisses. The good minister hums at us, as I get the best ever kiss from Ben, only to be rudely interrupted by the good Reverend Stephens.

"Plenty of time for that Benjamin, when I have married you, are you done Son?"

"Yes Sir, I got carried away, carry on Sir." He made Ben blush.

"We are gathered here today in the face of this company, to join together Benjamin David Lord and Penelope Abigail Rose Daniels. Marriage joins two people in the circle of its love, it's a commitment to life, the thing that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities for learning and growth that no other opportunity can equal, both a physical and emotional joining and a promise for a lifetime together. Happiness is fuller, memories are fresher, and the commitment is deeper. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes that life is unable to avoid. When two people pledge their love and care for each other within a marriage, they create a spirit, which binds them closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise written in the hearts of the two people who love each other, and it takes a lifetime to fulfil. Who gives this woman in marriage today?

"I do me, Thomas William Mackenzie, the third." Ben smiles as he bent down and hugged Thomas. "I'm supposed to give you Penny's hand Ben, you're messing this up. Quit with the cuddles, I'm too old to be cuddled." The family laugh as Thomas tells Ben to stop fooling around this is serious.

"Ben, do you take Penny for your lawful wedded wife, to live in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love her, honour her, comfort her and cherish her from this day forward, forsaking all others, keeping only unto her for as long as you both shall live?"

"Seeing as she has the pretty frock on. You bet I do Reverend Stephens, she'd not be very pleased if I said no, and so I do, yes I do."

"Thank you for that Ben. Now Penny, do you take Ben, for your lawful wedded husband to live in the holy estate of matrimony. Will you love him, honour him, comfort him, and cherish him from this day forward, forsaking all others, keeping only unto him for as long as you both shall live?

"I definitely do, yes."

"Ben has written his own vows, as has Penny. Ben, please say your vows to Penny." Nervous isn't covering how he looks, and then he speaks straight from the heart, oh.

"Penny, from this day forward, I promise you this, to be your partner for life, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I don't yet know about you will be as loving and as caring as you have always been, to the ever learning idiot you have agreed to marry. I'll laugh with you in times of joy, and comfort you in times of sorrow. I'll share in your dreams and support you as we work together to achieve our goals, to have a happy family and to be happy in all we do. I'll listen to you with compassion and try hard to be understanding. I promise never to lie to you. So please never ask me does my butt look big. I know that lies are what hurt you the most, so I will never go to bed, leaving an argument in the air. You have too much time to think if you sleep on it if we do." Suzie whooped.

"Most of all, I promise to be a true and loyal friend, I'll always love you, you're my best friend, and one I'll love and respect always. I live for the chance to grow old together, whilst getting to know the friend, the wife and the mother you will become, and I will fall in love a little more with you each day. I give you Penny my hand in marriage and everything I have is yours. Subject to the strict contract you had drawn up, exclusions in paragraphs two and three." Everyone laughed. "I Promise to be always remain faithful to our vows, through good times and bad, in times of sickness and health. I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may show us, from this day forward and for as long as we both shall live, an eternity with you my darling Penny, will never be long enough." Oh, can I take him home now, I want to unwrap him?

"Penny can you please say your vows to Ben." I just hope I can stop the tears.

"I Promise you this one thing, that I'll love you forever. If that's not long enough Ben, see paragraphs two and three in the contract." He smiled and with his deep laugh held me tightly. "I promise to encourage and inspire you, to laugh with you and sometimes at you, and the stupid things you always manage to do and say. I promise to fight in your corner, and make sure no harm befalls you, because what hurts you hurts me too. I promise to comfort you in times of sorrow, to be the warm shoulder you need to cry on or the person you need to tell your worries to.

I promise to love you in good times and bad, these things I promise you today, and for all the days of our life. I promise to try in every way possible, to be worthy of your love, to be a good wife, a mother, lover and friend. I promise I'll always be by your side, wherever you go I go too. I promise to support you when your strength is challenged, and I promise to ask for your help when I need it, because I believe we are stronger together than we are apart. I promise to love you with a fierce passion, to be playful, to be tender and above all be loyal, sharing myself fully with you and only you, nurturing our love so that we grow even closer.

Finally, I promise, to you, nothing less than the rest of my life. You are my life Ben; you and our children will always be the centre of my world. This is what I mean when I tell you that I love you. My promises I make today are made on the first day of the rest of our lives together, no more running, no more hiding just you me and just a few more Boo's, than just these two. I love you Benjamin David Lord and I always will." Yes, I did it oh heck he's crying. Please stop or I'll start, crap, too late.

"Right do you two need a minute?" Hankies passed, and eyes wiped.

"No, we're fine Reverend Stephens. We both seem a little emotional for some strange reason?" I want to laugh at Ben but if I do, the tears will flow.

"Can I please have the rings, please best man?" Dan hands them over having never seen them I look at the wedding bands Platinum bands with intricate engravings on them, so pretty.

"May this ring be blessed so he who gives it to she who wears it may abide in peace and continue in love until life's end?" Ben smiles as he puts the ring on my finger, nervously taking hold of my hand and smiled as he slipped the ring on my finger.

"With this ring Penelope Abigail Rose Daniels, I thee wed. Wear it forever as a symbol of my love for you and a sign of my commitment to you, our marriage and our family. I give this ring along with my heart to you and you alone."

"May this ring be blessed so she who gives it to him, who wears it, may abide in peace and continue in love until life's end?"

"Benjamin David Lord, I give you this ring as a reminder that I'll love, honour, and cherish you, in all times, in all places and in all ways and forever. As a ring has no end, neither shall my love for you. I choose you to be my husband from this day and forever." As I push the ring on his finger, I look into his eyes and smile. The ring slips effortlessly onto his finger and he grips my hand tightly.

"May this couple continue to give love to each other and their family, to forgive mistakes, and as I know Benjamin very well, there are bound to be many. They will grow to love each other more, as each day unfolds, with the Lords help they will grow and experience more and more joy with each passing day, and then with each passing year they will fall deeper in love and continue in God's good grace, we ask dear Lord to help them flourish and prosper in everything they do. Ben and Penny are now beginning their married life together. We hope that they get loving assistance from their family, the constant support of friends, and along with their family, friends and their love for each other, and with God's help and a guiding hand from a great and good departed soul, a fine Lord patriarch.

We pray that together, they have a long life with good health and an everlasting love. I know my best friend is watching down on his son and would be very proud of the man you have become, and the good son and brother he always knew you would be. You Penny, are about to join a truly wonderful family, one that will only be bettered for having you in it." If Ben didn't cry before and he did, he certainly was now, as were most of the Lord family, wow happy tears and sad tears, and plenty of Kleenex being passed around. Reverend Stephens hugs Ben and they man slap each other. "In so much as Benjamin and Penelope, have now consented to live forever together in holy wedlock, and have witnessed the same before this company, having given and pledged their troth, each to the other and having declared the same by the giving and receiving of a ring. I pronounce that they are now Husband and Wife. You Ben may do what you have been waiting so long to do, you may now kiss your beautiful bride."

He sweeps me into his arms, and I swear he forgets we have guests behind us as he kisses me deeply and as his tongue glides against mine, he breaks free and his fella is ready to party. Only Ben, the energizer bunny, would get a hard on at his wedding. I held his hand tightly carefully positioning the flowers over the problem. We have to go to the office and sign all the paperwork, there is only so much you can do over the phone and by email. Lucky for us Ben is popular in his hometown, so much so, that Judge Thompson has come with all the paperwork. Apparently, having him as a Godfather helps too, bless Eleanor for having such good friends. The Reverend and Mrs Stephens, his Godmother and other Godfather and the good judge flew in by jet last night.

"I like your surprises Mrs Lord."

"I don't think Mom and our guests will like your surprise much Mr Lord." He's a little more relaxed so we can take the flowers away. I'm thinking the threat of his mother did the trick. Twenty minutes later and paperwork is completed, we are now man and wife, and after yet more kisses, we set about the photos and see to the guests. The children aren't in school, but they have all been invited with their parents to stay, to eat and drink and be merry, it's a fun filled evening with much merriment and laughter. With one added mad barking dog being fussed over and fed, thrown into the mix, the kids love her. What's not to love she gives cute sloppy lick kisses and isn't fussed who gets them.

I get to meet Amy Louise Lord, she's as bright as a button and beautiful, she holds my hand and signs into it, I sign back that, I'm Penny and I'm so pleased to meet her, she's beautiful in her dress and she rubs my hand. I sign into her hand, as I speak to her parents, they are stunned I learnt to sign. What, I'm patron of a school for gifted children, I needed to be able to talk to them, so learnt it on my travels. They thank me for getting her in to the school and for thinking of her needs, with all the gifts I sent her, she asks to feel my face and as her gentle hands touch me. I cry, she's wonderful and I may be a little emotional.

"Ben spoke about her with such admiration and such love, I fell in love with him more, if that was at all possible." They take Amy to the 'The Lord's Garden.' We walk around the school and I love what they have been able to do with the money, they have hired extra staff and have finished the school. The party goes on into the night, the children leave, way past their bedtimes and so do Ben and I for our wedding night back in the hotel. A very happy Ben carries me to the car. His mother and the rest are following us, as the caterers and the cleaners put the school back to its pristine state, as it was before the Lords had taken over their building.

"Penny that was the best day ever, I love you Milady and for everything were about to do I thank you in advance, in case Baby, that I'm too worn out to thank you later and Mrs Lord you look beautiful."

"Mr Lord you don't look bad yourself, for an old married man." As we pull up to the hotel, there are a mob of photographers.

"Come on Milady, if I've you in my arms, I'm not likely to throw a punch, but hell you look stunning, why wouldn't they take your photograph?" As we run the gauntlet. Ben kisses me, and the flashes go wild he ignore all comments and just said.

"Thanks for your good wishes, my wife and I are happy to announce our marriage..."

Epilogue:

On our first anniversary, the twins and Daddy are playing on the grass in the back garden. They look like two perfectly cloned miniatures of Ben. They each have his eyes and his coppery hair. Grandma is watching their every move, after yet another clear batch of test results and another great reason to celebrate. The Aunties are playing in the pool with Goldie. The heat is wonderful and as I put the last of the ribs to marinade, Ben smiles as the doorbell rings, I answer it.

"Suzie Q is my little girl coming in on her own?"

"Her father has her, and I swear if he asks me for more children, he's bits are going in the jar without him cheating."

"Um, so Amanda is to be an only child?" She's the most beautiful child ever, well apart from the two on the rug in the garden.

"No Penny Lane, she has her father to keep her company." I missed her sense of humour, but she'd only given birth three weeks ago and he already asked when he could have more.

At least Ben waited for the twins to be a whole four months old, before he did it again, with boys, three and four, Mom is more than a little pleased, she loves David and Douglas, when Thomas and Daniel get here, the babies, not the adopted brother and the godfather. Don't ask. Dan speaks in a bad Italian voice around the boys because he's their godfather. He thinks he's Dan 'The Don' Manners, Don Corleone, he ain't, but I am gonna make him an offer he can't refuse, shut up with the bad Italian, or he's on Goldie's pooper scooper duty.

Mom is going to be in her element, and I think Ben intends to fill the bloody ten bedroomed houses with kids before he hits thirty. He's a wonderful father and a doting husband so he can have as many as he wants. I loved having them, besides making them ain't to bad a chore either. I love being his wife, lover and manager, their mother, sister and her daughter. I love being a stay at home mum, with just the one client, whom I break my golden rule with all the time. I get to make mad passionate love to him wherever and whenever I want. It's in the contract I had him sign, the day he signed the best contract he's ever signed, the one after our marriage and that is airtight and in there, is a transfer embargo, to any other ladies team, when Milady is in charge.

We sold the condominium after the incident, and we never went back, for a short while we lived with Mom and the girls. When we got this house, bought in the main, because it came complete with a massive cinema room, for chick flick night and it also came complete with a five bedroomed house in the grounds, and we all live here. I finally have my big happy family, which thanks to Ben and his very fertile tadpoles, is ever growing. I'm damn glad I kept my New Year's Resolution, two years on the trot. This year's was to have hot sex in the garden, with my hot husband and make more babies, a double whammy, in more ways than one, oh my...

Thanks for reading my story,

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so I can see where I'm going wrong and thanks again for reading it...
