

### Relationship with God:

### Praying for Divine Truth

### By

### Jesus (AJ Miller)

Published by

Divine Truth, Australia at Smashwords

http://www.divinetruth.com/

Copyright 2014 Divine Truth

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

Thank you for downloading this ebook. You are welcome to share it with your friends. This book may be reproduced, copied and distributed. If you enjoyed this book, please return to Smashwords.com to discover other works by this author. Thank you for your support.

### This ebook is a transcript of a seminar delivered on 24th May 2009 in Brisbane, Australia, by Jesus (also known as AJ Miller) as part of the Relationship with God series, focusing on how to long for God's Truth and discover absolute truth. God's Truth will set you free.

### Reminder From Jesus & Mary

### Jesus and Mary would like to remind you that any document produced by Divine Truth containing any information from Jesus, Mary or any other person includes only a portion of God's Truth that they have personally discovered.

### It does not and cannot contain the entire of God's Truth since God's Truth is infinite and humankind will forever continue to discover more of God's Truth as we progress in receiving more of God's Love.

### Please remember that due to these limitations information contained within this document may need to be revised in the future.

### Many other ebooks have been published by Divine Truth, including ebooks translated into a variety of different languages.

### Please visit <http://www.Smashwords.com/profile/view/DivineTruth> or www.divinetruth.com for further information.

### Additional sessions on the subject in this book can be found on www.Smashwords.com/profile/view/DivineTruth

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Table of Contents

### Longing for Divine Truth: Part 1

1. Introduction

1.1. AJ's emotional state

2. Coming to see ourselves as God sees us

3. Transitioning from the second to the third sphere of the spirit world

4. Praying for Divine Truth to enter us emotionally

4.1. Qualities of Prayer

4.2. Without truth, Divine Love cannot flow

4.3. Truth prepares our souls for Divine Love

4.4. Not accepting a truth prevents God's Love from flowing

4.5. Not believing that God is an entity blocks God's Love from flowing

4.6. Our emotions determine our connection with God, not our minds

4.7. Understanding how to receive Divine Love

4.8. Personal truth vs. Divine Truth

4.9. Divine Truth can enter our souls if we seek it

5. Living in truth

5.1. Withholding truth is not being truthful

5.2. Truth never creates pain

5.3. Speaking the truth

5.4. By not speaking the truth to someone we are not loving them

6. AJ interviews Mary about her experiences with truth

7. When we love truth in our lives is when we are praying for Divine Truth

8. Emotions that prevent our love of truth

8.1. Shame and embarrassment

9. Qualities of Divine Truth

10. Divine Truth is infinite

10.1. Truth exposes error

10.2. Seeking truth

11. Divine Truth is Absolute

11.1. Divine Truth is absolute but progressive in its discovery

11.2. If we seek first Divine Love, truth will be added to us

11.3. Learning Truth from God

12. Divine Truth is fully harmonious with Divine Love

12.1. When we become at-one with God our personal truth will match Divine Truth

13. Divine Truth does not compromise even for the sake of peace

13.1. Not compromising for peace involves owning our emotions

### Longing for Divine Truth: Part 2

14. Divine Truth is emotional, not intellectual

15. Facing personal truth

15.1. Judging ourselves

15.2. Blaming ourselves and others

15.3. Emotions of self-deception

16. Divine Truth always respects free will

16.1. How God treats our free will

16.2. When we respect other's free will we don't make decisions for them that they wouldn't make

16.3. Reasons for lack of focus on the discussion

17. Divine Truth does not conform to men's beliefs

18. Divine Truth always results in freedom

18.1. Example of the monetary system being out of harmony with Divine Truth

18.2. Example of the political system being out of harmony with Divine Truth

18.3. Examples of family situations that are in harmony with Divine Truth

18.4. Dealing with demanding and controlling mothers

18.5. Getting under anger into grief

18.6. Example from AJ's life about living in truth with his mother

18.7. Being truthful about our relationships with our mothers

19. Divine Truth results in a fearless existence

19.1. Example of fears of lack of abundance

20. Closing Words

Appendix: Seminar Outline

Longing for Divine Truth: Part 1

1. Introduction

1.1. AJ's emotional state

During the week a lot of emotions have been coming up for me about my connection with God and they relate to being the Messiah and a lot of first century emotions, which I'm really afraid of getting into. Because I'm pretty afraid of getting into them I shut myself down quite a lot this week and as a result of that I got sick instantly. As soon as I shut myself down I get sick instantly pretty much nowadays.

I started getting sick about Wednesday. I started trying to deal with the fear firstly. I have had quite a few fear-based events since then but I have still not dealt with the fear so the blockage is still there, which means that the sickness hasn't gone away, so it's going to continue I feel from now on until I get over the fear and into the emotions. Usually I have had this happen quite frequently at times over the last five or six years where I have had different events occur and it's taken some time to get out of the blocking of the event and into actually feeling the blockages, releasing the blockages and then eventually getting into the core emotion. You have probably found the same in some of your progression for those of you who are beginning to progress on the emotional path.

So the key is to not judge your self very much, which I have had a terrible tendency to do in the past, not so much now. Probably the majority of you have found at times that you have had a tendency to judge yourself for not getting to your emotion. So my suggestion is to just allow the emotions to come up naturally and that's what I'm trying to do firstly with my fear. Today you will notice that at times that I will be quite shaky and I will be shaking physically because I'm still working through some fear and terror about some things. You will also notice that my voice will sometimes fail, which is a part of it, and I have got some fairly bad blockages across my chest today. So I'm finding it a bit difficult to breathe; I'm a bit asthmatic today, which has been the first time I have had that feeling for a long time.

That tells me that I've got an interesting few weeks coming up with all of that. Usually what I find is it might take a few weeks to a month for me to work through those emotions, if I work through them solidly. So hopefully by the next time I see you I will be feeling good again. At the moment I'm not feeling too good.

That all being said, the subject that I would like to talk to you about today is a really important subject for your own progression; it's the subject of "Longing for God's Truth," which is really prayer for God's Truth. Prayer for God's Truth is one of the most essential things because it's the Truth that actually sets you free. But it's not your truth that sets you free; it's God's Truth that sets you free. Does that make sense to everyone?

2. Coming to see ourselves as God sees us

There's a huge difference between what your personal truth is and what God actually feels about you, and what God knows about you. In the end what we need to do is start getting ourselves away from what we feel about ourselves in terms of what we believe ourselves to be and get ourselves into this state of actually coming to know how God sees us, and beginning to see ourselves the same way as God sees us.

Now as you can imagine that process is quite difficult because God has this huge universal view of everything including this huge universal long-term view about yourself. So he knows exactly what you are capable of, right down to the most powerful thing you will ever do and he knows exactly what you are capable of right down to the most negative and evil thing you might contemplate. God knows all those things and everything in between about you. Often we don't want to know them about ourselves. So what we do, and what the majority of us has done all of our lives, is we have developed this fictitious viewpoint of ourselves.

Anything that triggers or anything that confronts that fictitious viewpoint of ourselves, we don't want to see. So what we finish up doing is spending a lot of our life avoiding truth and avoiding our Law of Attraction, in order to not see the things that are actually going on inside of us.

What we need to do is get out of this state of this fictitious viewpoint of ourselves and get into this state of seeing ourselves very clearly. But that's very, very difficult right at the start of this progression that you are entering into.

3. Transitioning from the second to the third sphere of the spirit world

Now the transition between seeing yourself as you wish to see yourself and starting to see yourself as God sees you and actually enjoying it, rather than avoiding it, is the transition that we make from the second to the third sphere of our development in the spirit world. Up until then, in the second sphere of the spirit world, and the transition from the first to the second sphere, is all about learning to see love differently. Most of us see love in a very, very selfish way when we begin. As we start developing we start seeing love in a totally different way and that's the transition, the desire for us to see the truth about love that's often the transition between the first sphere and the second sphere.

Many of you have gone through that transition of starting to see that you actually are not as loving as what you thought you were. And many of you are going through that transition of starting to see that actually the things that you thought about yourself regarding love were actually in error. Many of you have gone through that transition or are going through that transition now.

So that means you are going through the transition of getting from the first sphere to the second sphere. Now the second sphere location is a much, much different location because we start enjoying aspects of love whereas before we were avoiding them. So many of you who are now going through this transition of starting to see these aspects of love and starting to enjoy seeing, "Oh boy I was unloving there. I see that now." And you start to feel quite good about seeing yourself a little more clearly with regard to love.

Now of course there are lots of other gradients of love because we're talking about the seven spheres before the transition into at-onement with God. So during the first sphere to second sphere transition, there's this big realization that goes on generally, and this desire to start to live love in your life. In the second to third sphere transition, it's the transition of the desire to live in truth. And particularly that transition is the case if you are on the Divine Love Path and it's that transition that I would like to talk to you about today.

4. Praying for Divine Truth to enter us emotionally

Because, for many of you if you're not already in it you are getting close to being in that transition. Remember the last time we got together we talked about prayer? Many of you on the Saturday were quite surprised about some of the aspects of prayer, right? How prayer is all emotional for example and that it's not intellectual and how it requires truth, openness and transparency, and all these other things that we require during prayer. What we are doing today is we're extending the definition of prayer. In this particular case we're focusing on praying for one particular thing, and that's for Divine Truth to enter your life. So that's what we are focusing on today is building this desire within you for Divine Truth to actually start growing inside of you.

For many of us when we start, Divine Truth comes to us in a very intellectual way. So it doesn't hit us emotionally, it usually hits us intellectually. We go, "Wow this all sounds really good," particularly when you think back to when you first heard a lot of the universal truths that we discussed. How did you feel? When you first saw those original DVDs, when you first came to those sessions, how did you feel?

Most of you felt really buoyant: "Wow this is what I have been looking for all of my life, understanding all of these things. It all makes sense; it all seems to fit together to me." A lot of these emotions start flowing inside of us but during that phase we're not yet conscious of how God sees us. We are usually now starting to see the Universe quite differently but we're not that conscious of how we are within ourselves actually and to become conscious of how you are yourselves emotionally is one of the biggest transitions you can make on the Divine Love Path. That's why it's such an essential part of your progression and that's why I would like to spend and devote the whole of this afternoon discussing that transition and what is involved in that transition.

4.1. Qualities of Prayer

If we remember from our discussion last week, prayer had to be emotional, do you remember that? Prayer has to be truthful, sincere, and pure, it doesn't come from your head, it comes from your passions, your desires, and your longings. Remember all of those points from our last discussion? What we want to do today is start seeing that truth also needs to be an emotion. Truth is not just an intellectual exercise. Truth is going to be an emotional exercise for us and what we want to do is start showing you how that can come about in your own life. Last week on the Saturday, when I started to talk about aspects of truth, did you notice how internally upset many of you became who were there? Did you notice this inner turmoil that begins? "You are saying I have to be truthful in this situation and this situation? And what about that situation?" And we then start asking a lot of these questions about situations specifically that we thought it would be better to not be truthful or to withhold information or to maintain privacy or whatever it was that we were trying to do.

4.2. Without Truth, Divine Love cannot flow

What we want to do today is start really deconstructing inside of ourselves this idea that we can actually connect to God without being truthful. Because the truth is you can't. I've read through a few forums this week that I have found interesting because I had some sleepless nights because of this problem that I'm going through, so I finished up reading through a few forums, which is something I wouldn't normally do. Many of those people that are on the Divine Love Path were saying that they could receive Divine Love without actually acknowledging Divine Truth, without knowing more truth and I would say that's impossible, actually it's an impossibility. If you are receiving Divine Love there has to be some new truth that you have also just grasped. Because without the truth, Divine Love cannot flow into you because remember the Holy Spirit - the Holy Spirit is that physical connection between God and you through which the Divine Love can flow into your soul - and that connection, that physical connection, can't connect unless you are in truth. So there has to be some new truth that you have just got for that connection and the Divine Love to flow in that particular instance. Without that it's impossible for the Divine Love to continue to flow.

Divine Love can only flow into our souls from God through the Holy Spirit when we are in truth

4.3. Truth prepares our souls for Divine Love

The role of the Divine Love isn't to prepare you for truth; the role of truth is to prepare you for Divine Love. Do you understand the difference? So you can think of it like this, the Divine Love is not something that you are going to receive if you want to stay out of harmony with truth. Remember we have God, God's soul, then we have our soul, which is our emotions, passions, desires, intentions; they are really the key four things that our soul has. There are obviously many other attributes. Remember the connection between our soul and God's soul was the Holy Spirit. The reason why it's called the Holy Spirit is because it's the only energy that God has that's used for the transmission of Divine Love from God to you. It's God's method of actually getting Divine Love into your soul, like a pipe that you get connected with. Remember I have said in the past the pipe can only connect when we are in truth, that's the whole principle. You can think of it like the truth is a gate valve if you like, or a tap, when you open it, when you actually turn on the truth then Divine Love flows, if you turn off the truth then Divine Love stops. So truth is really in the end what prepares your soul for the Divine Love to enter it. Can you see that? Truth is the thing that prepares your soul for Divine Love, this love from God.

4.4. Not accepting a truth prevents God's Love from flowing

Remember Divine Love is the love from God and it's the truth that prepares your soul for the reception of Divine Love. When Divine Love stops flowing within me, or if I have felt myself that it's never flowed within me, it's because there are some truths that I'm not yet accepting.

There are literally hundreds of thousands of truths that we can accept. In fact I feel that the truth is actually infinite so there are literally billions and billions of truths that we can accept. But there are specific truths that affect the flowing of love. One primary specific truth is that God is an entity and God exists, that's a basic truth.

4.5. Not believing that God is an entity blocks God's Love from flowing

Now if I don't believe God is an entity but rather I believe God is a force, or a conglomeration or a conglomerate number of entities, or the Universe itself, I will never be able to receive Divine Love in that state of belief. Now when I say that state of belief I'm not talking about the state of belief that exists within my head, I'm talking about the state of belief that exists within my soul, and they are two completely different states. So in my soul I might actually feel that God does exist while in my head I might intellectualize that God doesn't; and under that state I can actually receive Divine Love, because it's my soul which is the real me, which is the connection with God. So in my head I might be thinking, "No, God doesn't exist. No, God doesn't exist," while in my heart I might be feeling, "Oh I feel God does exist but I'm trying to suppress that emotion." But it's that emotion that's connecting with God.

4.6. Our emotions determine our connection with God, not our minds

So therefore it's that emotion that drives whether we receive love or not, not what is going on in my head. Now the same applies with all other truths. Quite often our head has one set of beliefs and our emotional state has a completely different set of beliefs. This is why many people in all religious paths receive Divine Love, and many people who are not on religious paths receive Divine Love. Because in their head they believe one thing, but in their hearts they believe something that's quite different.

4.7. Understanding how to receive Divine Love

Now what we want to do is start activating the heart in a conscious way rather than in an unconscious way. In other words we want to start receiving Divine Love and know what we are doing because if you know what you are doing you can receive it faster and with more accuracy and often understand the principles and processes involved. That's the whole point of our discussions. So that we understand the principles involved in, "How I'm receiving Divine Love".

So I may be going along for example to a Christian Pentecostal type of church and then I have these raising wonderful experiences now and then and I feel like I'm connected to God in that moment, but I don't know why that happens. Or I might be a Muslim who goes along to a mosque and prays five times a day and then sometimes while I'm praying for some reason I feel differently after I come out than the other times that I've prayed. So I want to know what is going on, what is the difference between those states. The difference is one time the soul is being activated and there are truths that are being absorbed at the soul level, which allows the connection with the Holy Spirit, which allows Divine Love to flow.

So what we now need to start to do is do this in a conscious way; actually start receiving Divine Love and understand what we are doing and understand why it's blocked and why we're not receiving it, so to do that we need to understand the importance of truth.

4.8. Personal truth vs. Divine Truth

I'm not talking about personal truth, although personal truth is a very important factor. What I'm talking about is there is a difference between Divine Truth, which belongs to God, but which can enter you emotionally, and your personal "truth", which I will put in quotations because often your personal "truth" is actually completely erroneous. You could say that your personal truth is at the moment your complete set of emotions that exist within yourself. So for example last week you might have been angry with an ex-partner and felt like you would like to hit her even, or hurt her even, because you are so angry, well that's a part of your personal truth.

Last week you were driving along in the car and somebody cut you off and you swore at them, well that's a part of your personal truth. But then there's also what you would classify as good things that are a part of your personal truth. Last week, the same week, you might have been having this lovely feeling towards somebody and this feeling of love and you felt this real close feeling with somebody; it might have been your child or it might have been your partner, or it might have been your father or mother or whatever. That's also your personal truth. Now some of those personal truths happen to be harmonious with God's and some of them happen to be in disharmony, direct disharmony with God.

Our personal truth is distinct from Divine Truth and is the set of emotions we currently have in our souls

4.9. Divine Truth can enter our souls if we seek it

Personal truth is really an essential part of this process. But if personal truth exists within your soul, God's Truth, God's Divine Truth exists within Her soul, and God's Divine Truth can enter your soul. But the way Divine Truth enters your soul is not through the connection with the Holy Spirit because the connection of the Holy Spirit is the connection of Love entering your soul, not truth.

The way truth enters your soul... and this is something I said in the first century too... is that you have to seek it. That's the way truth enters your soul. In other words the only way that God's Truth can enter into your soul is for this other aspect of your soul to be completely developed, and this other aspect of your soul is this desire in your soul for truth no matter what, for God's Truth no matter what!

Once you enter that state where you're desiring God's Truth with all of your heart, now Divine Truth can actually enter your soul and it's one of the most important preparations that your soul makes for Divine Love entering it, because without Divine Truth you haven't got this connection. Without Divine Truth you haven't got this connection.

If you could think of this whole exercise today if you like, and it's going to be in fact an exercise that you use the rest of your entire existence, it's an exercise of actually learning to bring your personal truth into harmony with God's Truth. One of the best things you could ever pray for... and remember prayer is a longing, a passionate longing directed towards God. So in other words it's an emotionally passionate longing directed from you towards God for something, and in this case for Divine Truth to enter your soul. That's when you have a seeking attitude. That's when you're seeking. From God's perspective when you're seeking is when you are having all of your heart focused on actually wanting God's Truth to enter you. God's Truth about you as well as about the Universe to enter you!

Now the aspects we usually find easy and interesting are God's Truth about the Universe, you can see why can't you? Because, you have no emotional attachment necessarily to many of those truths. Some of them you have an emotional attachment to, so you might have a belief in the old form of reincarnation for example, so that's an emotional error within, so when you hear that particular truth you're going to have some resistance to that. But most of the time our hearing universal truth, hearing truth outside of ourselves, is a really fascinating and joyful experience. We feel really attracted to it.

But when it comes to somebody telling me some personal things about myself that I have never wanted to see all my life, now how do I feel? That's a totally different kettle of fish isn't it? That's a totally different situation; in most cases we resist that truth with as much vigour as we possibly can manage. Usually that means getting angry and upset and all sorts of things with the person who brought us that truth.

5. Living in truth

5.1. Withholding truth is not being truthful

If we are seeking God's Truth that way won't be in us. In other words if you can get to a point... and you will get to this point when you make the transition between the second and the third sphere, where you will feel this passionate desire and longing within you all the time to find out what the truth is about yourself no matter how bad it's going to look. No matter how bad you're going to look in front of everyone else. That's the transition between the second and the third sphere that all people who make the transition on the Divine Love Path have to go through. So if you want to be on the Divine Love path you have to go through this transition. People then say, "What about free will? I thought I could do anything with my free will?" Well you can do anything with your free will, but God has made one path to God and the path goes through this doorway of truth. So you can think of the start of the path to God if you like. There is a doorway about natural love that you've got to step through and the next doorway after that's the door way about truth, that you have got to step through and then your path is going to lead you along some other roads of course and up to eventually the state of at-onement.

Participant: I would just like to mention one of the things that changed my mind about it was with regard to free will. I thought well if I'm holding on to this truth, then I'm actually holding that person's free will in my own hands.

Exactly!

Participant: And I feel like that that's worse than only just expressing my own free will, but I'm causing someone to make decisions based on falseness.

That's it.

We will go through some of the qualities of Divine Truth as we go through this chat and one of them is that, one of them is that you will get to a point where you will realize that when you are withholding truth from others you are actually now placing their lives in your hands to an extent. By the time you get to the third sphere you are not going to want to do that ever again.

Participant: And even though at the beginning I didn't really feel obligated, because it's something that happened before I met this person, but then I started to think, "Okay well if they actually knew this information then perhaps they wouldn't actually want to know me."

And perhaps they might make different decisions.

Participant: Yes and that's exactly why I felt like I may need to tell them because they probably would not want to be with me if they knew that.

Exactly, and when you think about it too from a personal emotional perspective, anything that you're holding onto emotionally, that you're not being open about with another person. That's also harming you because it means that you are actually trying to control that particular part of you in the interaction with them. Any attempt to control any part of you in any interaction with another person means you are not being yourself with that person. So for example the only way that true closeness is created between a couple is for each one of the couple to know exactly what they feel about each other, exactly what they feel. In every situation!

If you can imagine that state being a third sphere state and then ask yourself about your own relationship. Does your partner know absolutely everything about you? How you feel about their attractiveness, sexually? What you have done sexually? And do they know all of those things about you? Not because they demand it of you but because you want to give that to them.

When you get to a third sphere condition you will want to do that. I would call that, "A life inventory of your life" given to your partner. You will want to do that for sure. If you don't want to do that then there is an emotion of fear within you, agreed? Fear is not harmonious with love or truth and so therefore there is an emotion that's being driven. Now if I'm in that state where I'm with holding something, let's say during the sex act I have a thought of some other previous partner; if I withhold that from my current partner, you can see it's starting to get a bit tricky? If I withhold that from my current partner then I'm blocking off a part of myself. One thing you will learn in this process is that everything you block off from yourself or block off from another, you are actually inhibiting the flow of emotions through yourself and what you will come to see in the end is that every time you do that, every single time you do that, you are disconnecting yourself from God as well.

You will get to a point in your own progression when you understand truth fully that you don't need to do that anymore. You don't need to withhold anything from anyone anymore. You can just be yourself completely at every single moment. How freeing is that? That's really freeing. Also we often hold onto these things and yet they're not as big as what we believe them to be. So for instance in the example I just gave where you are making love to your partner and you have a thought of a previous partner, often we will have such big feelings of shame, "Oh what was that about?" And we will go through this terrible internal turmoil, which will influence our sexual relationship with our current partner, and yet the only reason why that thought might have come to us is because that particular partner had a certain emotional injury that was complimentary to an emotional injury within me, and if I allowed myself to speak of it, I would find it there and then and release it and then never think of that person again. Do you know what I mean? So quite often that's what could happen.

But we often don't think that. We think, "If I tell my partner she's going to be really upset, she's going to be really angry. What might happen to my relationship?"' And we go down this other road, which is the road of maintaining deceit with each other, which is the road of maintaining falsehood. In other words I'm holding on to my personal truth but actually the problem is that it's also keeping me stagnant.

5.2. Truth never creates pain

Participant: Couldn't you create an emotional injury in that partner?

No you already are creating an emotional injury in that partner. This is what we don't understand. Whenever you withhold truth from someone at the soul level, the soul knows that you're withholding it. Many of you know this already right; in your own interactions you know when your own partner is holding something back from you, do you not? Doesn't that cause damage?

What causes connection is you being totally open and truthful, that's what causes connection. This is one of the basic misunderstandings on this planet. The basic misunderstanding is I can hurt someone with truth. That's not ever true. You can never hurt someone with truth. The way you hurt someone is by withholding truth or lying; that's how you hurt people. It's the error leaving the person that hurts them not the truth entering them. Most of us believe it's the truth entering them that hurts them. But the truth is that it's the error leaving that hurts you; if the error were never within you then it would never have hurt you to hear the truth. That's something we don't understand either and we'll talk about that in a minute.

Participant: I just wanted to say also that even making the decision to hold back the truth is the whole reason why we are here at the moment anyway. Because from when we were young we did have these pure feelings of love and awareness of certain things but it's all the information that got withheld from through other people's fears and errors that brought us to believe those falsities as well and caused us to carry out the same system.

Exactly! So many of us have become addicted to falsehood! We have become addicted to it because it prevents certain emotions from being experienced that we don't want to experience. So what we do is we become so addicted to maintaining a lie with everyone just so that everyone doesn't have to feel their emotions, but what God wants is us to live in complete truth from God's perspective, so that's going to mean that we are going to need to at some point in the future understand all the truth about myself. All the truth! Everyone around me will know that I'm being completely and 100% truthful at all times at some point in their future as well. They will understand that.

5.3. Speaking the Truth

Participant: You have said before that there are situations where you don't feel another soul wants to hear the truth. You are saying the third sphere condition is going to be saying the truth all of the time. That means that with every person, in every interaction, that I come in contact with; I'm just going to say the truth about what I feel about them and myself?

Yes.

Participant: Isn't it unloving if they don't want to know the truth and live in their denial?

They need to be given the choice, the chance to make that choice.

Participant: So you just say, "Can I tell you the truth?"

Yeah. I'm going to be truthful with everyone, in all situations; "Do you want to know the truth that I know about you?" A lot of people say, "No I don't." That's okay too, that's their free will; they are allowed to make that choice. They are not going to be closer to God making that choice but they are allowed to make that choice.

Participant: But it seems it's a bit blurry there because there are situations where you are going to feel strongly that you want to say the truth and the other person will just not want to hear the truth and you feel like you're keeping it in.

I don't feel inside of myself that there is any blurry situation when it comes to truth. The feeling I have is under all circumstances and in every situation I'm going to say the truth, because I just have this really, really strong desire in me to do that. Every time I don't do that I compromise myself and I don't want to compromise myself anymore. So in the end you've got to remember that love is not just loving of the other person, it's also loving of yourself, and you and the other person in your eyes will become equal. In other words if somebody doesn't want to hear the truth but you want to say it you are allowed to say it. Just as much as they are allowed to not hear it.

Participant: I am just really afraid that, that will get me into some really bad situations in society.

Certainly!

Participant: And will that happen?

Well it got me in some pretty bad situations in society.

Participant: Well what's the worst thing that happened to you?

Well I died.

Participant: You died?

You know I was hung on stake.

Participant: No, but this time around?

I lost all my family for seven years none of them ever spoke to me for seven years. So that was one thing that happened. I lost every single friend I ever had. So all the friends that I had up until 33, not a single one of them is in my life now, not a single one is in my life now.

Participant: What about issues with the law and how, you know, they could lock you down?

Yes I have had to pay lots more money in tax because of telling the truth for example. I had one property sell one day too late for me to actually include it in a different taxation scheme and I had to pay $60,000. The accountant wanted me to falsify the day of sale to one day earlier and I refused to do that because I wouldn't have been truthful. It cost me $60,000 to do that.

Participant: So if we left today and just said the truth constantly every moment, we are going to end up crying four hours a day? Is that what is going to happen?

Well what will happen is, and this is the beauty of truth, the truth opens your soul. What do you think I felt when I had to pay $60,000 just because I didn't have the right date on a settlement contract? What do you think I felt? I had no money at the time. So what do you think I felt? I felt quite triggered. There were lots of emotions I had to deal with. How unfair is this? About taxation and all sorts of issues just because I had to stay in truth and you will find if you stay in truth 100% of the time there will just be so many emotions that come up as a result and it will be beautiful for you because every one of those emotions is what's preventing you from staying in truth.

Participant: Hi, I haven't studied the Bible but did you talk about, "You can't serve two masters?"

Yes I did.

Participant: So for me then, say for example using the taxation thing, I don't believe that tax money is necessarily used towards purposes of Divine Love and Truth.

Yes.

Participant: Therefore if I'm contributing to that, am I...? That's sort of the question being asked...

You can decide to not pay tax if you want, the thing is if you are lying about it, now you are breaking a Law of God. So you are allowed to say to the government, "I am not paying tax." God has no problems with that. God does have a lot of problems with you lying about it, because you break your relationship with God then.

Participant: Would God want you to pay $60,000.00 to a system that ultimately doesn't serve you?

Does He care? What does God care about?

Participant: You being truthful?

God cares about your soul. God doesn't worry about $60,000 either way. God worries about your soul. That's what God is concerned about. You see this is where we often want to compromise truth. You see what we have is we have these financial investments in actually not telling the truth. From God's perspective God has no trouble with you not paying tax. But God has a lot of trouble with you lying about it, from God's perspective. When I say God has a lot of trouble with it, he doesn't feel any emotion in the sense of, "Ooh you naughty girl," or whatever. He is just saying to you, "You can't connect with me when you do that. You are never going to be at-one with me doing that." That's all he is saying to you. We will talk about all of these issues in detail during the day.

Participant: I'm going to have to feel into what you're saying.

The key is to feel into every issue that you're raising and question you're raising. Because when you feel into it emotionally what will happen is you will start understanding that actually I have an emotional reason why this particular issue is an issue for me.

How many of you know, for example, that the taxation department is going to really go for you if you stop paying tax? Most of us a very afraid of authority, are we not? This is why we often pay our tax when we don't want to. How many of you want to pay your tax? No one! Interesting! I don't want to either. How many of you feel like you have to pay your tax? Or how many of you feel like you are just going to falsify as much as you can so you don't have to pay it? The majority of people, many people are in that state.

There is an emotional reason why we're in that state. That emotional reason is the core reason we need to address in our relationship with God. So yes the question that Josh asked; "Have you had to pay prices for telling the truth?" Yes. This system of things we live in, the way that it's constructed, there are lots and lots of so called prices you are going to have to pay for truth. In my opinion the biggest price you can have for telling a lie or staying in a state of falsehood is your relationship with God. That's the biggest price you could ever pay for anything and I don't want to sacrifice that for anything. Even if it means I go to gaol because I have said or done something from a world's perspective as being wrong. I just don't want to ever do that with God.

Participant: Getting back to your earlier conversation in relation to being in bed with someone. I don't know if other people have noticed this but you talk about your spirituality, sex, or intercourse, or whatever you want to call it. I don't know if other people have had the same experience but usually during the act, if we call it that, when it culminates if that happens at the same time there is a clairvoyance there; at that time you know exactly what that person is thinking. I don't know if the other people have the same thing but it's really hard to lie at that moment.

Exactly!

Participant: Because you just see straight through the other person.

Exactly! That's very true and it's one of the things God made us to do. When we are feeling a positive emotion, in this case a sexual climax or sexual orgasm, we are also feeling all the other emotions generally that flow through us and we are quite naked not in a physical sense but in an emotional sense.

Participant: And physically.

And physically obviously in many cases! But more importantly emotionally we are quite naked to the other person anyway.

5.4. By not speaking the truth to someone we are not loving them

Participant: You said something about not lying. If your friends tell you something about another friend and they didn't want you to tell them, and then the friend that they were talking about asked you a question about that. What do you do? Because you said that you wouldn't tell, but then you would be kind of lying if you said, "I don't know what you are talking about?"

Okay, the first issue is why are you saying to people that you won't tell the truth to others? There's an emotion in that. Usually the emotion is that I want to retain this friend to be my friend. You want an intimacy with a certain friend but in order to get that intimacy they are telling you, you've got to say nothing about your relationship with them basically. How can you ever have intimacy with that requirement right at the beginning? You can't. So the first thing we would need to address is, why am I agreeing to maintain something as private to a person who is demanding that of me before they tell me the truth? Obviously they don't understand love yet. If they understood love they would understand that actually every time I ask you to not tell the truth about something I'm actually compromising your relationship with God or I'm attempting to. So that's number one. What emotion within me causes me to even agree to have a relationship on that basis?

Participant: But if it's for instance a surprise or something and you don't want them to know but you don't want to lie?

Well if it's a surprise or something... we are talking about soul-based things here, not things where everyone is planning a birthday party or something like that. Obviously all of those types of issues are very, very separate because the person will find out eventually what you are doing. I'm talking about where there is something that affects their life or something about the person that will be very, very good for them to know. I'm not talking about these little parties or planning parties around a surprise. Often I will get Mary a surprise but I won't tell her what it is until I give it to her. But that's not withholding truth about a soul-based issue. What I'm talking about here is withholding truth around a soul-based issue. So let's say your friend told you something she doesn't like about your other friend. Now we are talking about a soul-based issue. Under those circumstances why would I agree to enter a code of silence with this first friend? There must be an emotion within me that causes me to do that so I need to address that, if I want to be closer to God.

Secondly the person, themselves asking me to maintain a code of silence has an issue they don't want to tell the person directly, in other words they are not being loving to your other friend. They are not practicing love, if they were practising love and they were upset with your other friend they would go straight to your other friend and say, "Look I'm actually upset with you because of..." whatever it is.

Participant: So if they find out about it eventually then it's okay?

My feelings are firstly look at the emotional reasons why you have allowed yourself to be controlled by this other person by acceding to their wish that you don't tell the truth because that's really what is happening. You are being controlled. Secondly look at the emotion in your friend; obviously your friend is not being loving. Why? Do you want to continue having relationships in your life where people are not loving? That's something you need to work your way through but when you are in a state of at-onement with God, you will want to have all of your relationships loving.

The third thing is that your friend who is being kept out of the loop is not really your friend yet until you can love her and tell her the truth, so there 's a lot of issues of love and truth in just that one little example you have brought up actually. Just that one little example! Now I know what happens inside of us is we go, "Oh but if I tell that person this person is going to get angry with me." Well my suggestion is go ahead, do that, let the person get angry, talk to them about the principles of love, if they never want to see you again, okay. Then you have just found out how important your love was. Many of us are not willing to find out how much people really love us and we are not willing actually to tell other people how much we really love them either, generally, by our actions, by the way in which we act towards them.

Participant: AJ how do you deal with situations where people don't tell you the truth and you know that because you can feel it? I get very angry.

Right, when people don't tell you the truth and you are getting angry, you are denying an emotion of hurt inside of your own soul. The first thing is to go through that anger, use that anger, you might go out and punch a bag, belt a hose, or whatever and really yell and curse or whatever about the actual issue, but allow that to actually open up this pathway into your grief about it and grieve the situation.

Usually when people don't tell us the truth there are a lot of things occurring. Obviously it's their Law of Attraction but it's also ours so there's an emotion in our soul being triggered that we need to allow ourselves to access. If I understand that intellectually and I allow myself to settle into that emotion you will work through a lot of reasons why people don't tell you the truth. So nowadays I have most people come up to me and tell me all the truth about their life, even the most sordid details, and the reason why is that I don't have any judgement about their most sordid details and I don't have any feelings of condemnation towards them. All these emotions within me have been released, which means that they feel that they can tell me the truth. So we need to work through those emotions.

If there is an emotion of anger capping it then the emotion of anger is actually preventing the deeper emotion of sadness within your self about being lied to. Allow yourself to access that emotion. It's a very core emotion because when you are lied to you are actually being told that they don't love you. See this is a basic thing about lying that most of us get when we are lied to, but we don't get when we are the one doing the lying. You understand?

When we are being lied to, the reason why we often feel hurt, when we find out the truth is because we start to realize in fact that there was no love in the lie. In that instance we are actually feeling a feeling of being unloved. And it's a core emotion within people on this planet, a feeling of being unloved. The way to tell whether you are actually loved is, is the person telling you the truth? If they aren't telling you the truth and you feel that they're not, feel the emotion inside of yourself of being unloved, and allow yourself to work through that emotion.

When you work through that emotion you will find that you will probably have a break in this relationship with that person unless that person goes through a process of actually working out why they lied. When they do that they get into a state of repentance and you will probably also easily get into a state of forgiveness. I'm saying that even if they're not like that you will still need to forgive, but go into the emotion inside yourself that has been triggered. The emotion inside of yourself will always be related to being a lack of love because in the case of truth not being told to me the person very, very definitely is saying to me that they don't love me.

This is something that we are very sensitive with at the soul level, this is why children in particular, when they are lied to and afterwards they get told the truth, they get pretty upset. They are very, very sensitive. What happens is as we grow up is we become more desensitized to actual lies and withholding the truth and so forth. So we learn to live in this environment where lies become common place. Many of us still have that soul thing going on where we are quite hurt at the soul level whenever we are lied to. Let yourself feel that unloved, it's an unloved feeling inside of your self.

Participant: Is it okay to say to that person, "I know that you are lying to me, why are you lying?"

Yes say that you feel that they are lying to you, why are they lying? Are they trying to protect you or are they trying to protect themselves? Usually they are trying to protect themselves from their own emotion. Most lies that are told or most withholding of truth is all done in order for people to protect themselves, from feeling an emotion. So talk about that, but if the person doesn't want to tell you the truth still, feel the emotion. At the end of the day you are still better off feeling the emotion first. Feel the emotion of feeling unloved first because that's the emotion being triggered in you.

When you feel that emotion and that emotion leaves you, you will find that that person might automatically come up to you and say, "Last week I told you a lie actually and I feel really bad about it now and I feel like I need to tell you the truth." That might happen automatically once you have dealt with the emotion. Many of you will find that if you deal with a core emotion, events conspire in such a way that the truth comes out anyway quite rapidly after that. So allow yourself to deal with the core emotion.

6. AJ interviews Mary about her experiences with truth

Now what I would like to do for the moment is I want to interview my lovely lady, so Mary can join me up here. The reason why I want to interview her is Mary has gone through quite a lot of stuff about truth quite recently. What I would like is for Mary to share with you the whole process she has been through with you for the last year and a half about truth. There have been many aspects to it that she has found and I feel that many of you will connect quite strongly to some of the stages if you like, of opening up to Divine Truth.

Mary: I just want to say isn't my soulmate really awesome? And he loves you so much because he is so sick today.

Before you met me, we met December not last year but the year before, December the 29th or 28th or something like that it was.

Mary: 29th.

The ladies always have the dates! Before you met me how did you view yourself with regard to truth? Did you feel you were a truthful person? Did you feel you were open and honest with people around you?

Mary: Yep.

What did you feel?

Mary: I felt that I was. I had a high regard for truth and that I told the truth most of the time... I would have said all of the time. I would have said that I don't lie and I would have said that I appreciate others telling me the truth. In fact my mother will tell you, actually she probably won't tell you but she would say to me, "You used to get so upset, Mary, if I said that the dog ran away but actually he died and you found out later." It was always a huge deal for me. I thought I was very truthful and loved truth.

Good. Shortly after we met we started spending time together in the first three or four months how did you find truth then? What were the feelings that you went through?

Mary: Well firstly when we were talking about God's Truth and not in personal terms I absolutely loved it, I was fascinated, I was excited and couldn't stop talking about it and we used to spend hours talking about that, but when it came to pointing out truth about me it was very confronting.

What used to happen then when you had truth about yourself pointed out?

Mary: I would get angry usually. I went all right for a little while, it stressed me out and I would withdraw and I got very angry at you for pointing things out or for you being truthful about the emotions you were having regarding my behaviour or my actions.

Yep.

Mary: I would try and control you in that way.

So when you went through that what were you feeling? What were the feelings inside of you? Were you feeling that this is a truth issue or were you feeling that I was being a bastard or...?

Mary: No, I couldn't think you were a bastard, which was really hard.

Many times you would have liked to do that!

Mary: I didn't recognize that it as an issue of truth, I felt that it was just all very overwhelming emotionally and that things were far too confronting and moving too quickly. But I didn't relate it to actually me resisting truth about my own emotions.

So you sort of felt it was my fault that you were being confronted with truth? Or you felt I was being too intense or...

Mary: Yes, emotionally that's definitely what I felt. In my head I was telling myself lots of other stories, but really I was blaming you for bringing me truth.

What were the stories you were telling yourself in your head?

Mary: Well I was denying a lot of my anger. I was saying I wasn't angry.

Right!

Mary: And I was saying, "No, no it's a good thing and he is a really great man and okay I need to take this all on board." But my emotions and my behaviour were actually saying, "Back off, I don't want to know, I'm really angry at you for telling me the truth."

Yep!

Mary: Or I would go into, "I hate myself because I'm such a bad person."

So then we got to a stage where it started to get really intense emotionally for you, what were you feeling towards me then in terms of the truth?

Mary: In terms of you telling me the truth?

In terms of even our relationship then, you were starting to feel....

Mary: I started to feel very shut down towards you and I told myself I didn't have any feelings for you, I couldn't possibly... and actually that I wanted to get away from you.

So then we spent three months apart and during that time what were you feeling about truth? You still had this attraction, didn't you, to Divine Truth?

Mary: Definitely, I knew that I had found THE Truth of God, but I wasn't willing to look at the truth of who I really was, emotionally, not just about my identity, because that was also huge but even just my own emotions that I was carrying around; the emotions that ran my life I was resistive to feeling that they were the truth.

So what happened in your Law of Attraction then? So the question was what happened with Mary's Law of Attraction during this time when she really wanted to stay away from me but still feeling drawn towards truth?

Mary: Life got pretty difficult because I guess my soul was sending out a few different messages. My Law of Attraction got pretty intense, but because I wanted to shut down what my truth was, how I was feeling emotionally, I got really to quite a desperate sort of a feeling inside of me. I sort of felt a bit suicidal for the first time in my life because there was such a stark contrast between where I felt I wanted to go and where I was letting myself go emotionally in terms of what was truly happening inside of me.

Were your emotions flowing during that time?

Mary: No, not at all, I went through this period of not being able to cry at all, I couldn't process a thing and my Law of Attraction got really intense. Every single patient I saw and family member that I saw for about a week and a half cried and cried. I would just come in and touch them or say something to them and they would be crying and I would be going, "I get it - I can't cry."

So then there were sort of some changes that occurred between you and God. What were those changes that sort of caused you to open up a bit emotionally?

Mary: It's all very blurred. Well I guess I reached a point where, the contrast was so great I felt like, "I can't keep going on like this."

So didn't you for a period of time decide to live in the truth of the fact that you were not going to be in truth?

Mary: Yes, I went through that phase of; "No, nothing that AJ says is true, I'm just going to live the life, the truth that I had before, the truth that my family believed, the role I always had, with my friends, with my family." And I needed to just move on with my life and get on with it. That's when the pain really kicked in.

So you went into the place of full denial of truth, something had obviously before then happened in your soul that had opened you up to truth and so now you were starting to feel quite a lot of pain?

Mary: Yep that's when I went through this awful period then of feeling, "Okay I have found the truth but I can't live in it because it's too big and it's too intense."

Too hard!

Mary: Too hard, yes. I'm not strong enough to be in truth, but I know what the truth is and that was pretty bad.

Okay. So that period lasted for quite a few weeks?

Mary: Yes.

Then you had a breakthrough with God. I don't know if you remember that. I remember a lot of it better than Mary does.

Mary: I feel like I have had a few breakthroughs with God, but probably I just felt really desperate, like I can't go on like this, I just have to go into this emotion, which by that stage was very black and very dark and is that when I called you?

Yes.

Mary: I was just sobbing for a long time and feeling that this is true and I can't cope with it God.

So you went through place of realizing... and this was more like the feeling that you had to follow the truth otherwise there would be lots and lots of pain in your life.

Mary: Yes.

Did you really make a soul desire for truth at that point?

Mary: No.

Okay. So what happened then over the next six months?

Mary: A lot of to-ing and fro-ing between truth, denial, resistance, truth, still an intense fascination and longing for God's Truth about the way the Universe works, the way my soul works but still a lot of resistance to actually feeling what my personal truth is about my life, my family, my relationships and who I am as a person.

So you felt really, really attracted to all of the soul truths about the Universe and about God's Laws and all of those things?

Mary: And emotional processing, the whole thing.

But when it came to actually being confronted with an emotion inside of your self, it was really hard then. So what would happen under those circumstances when an emotion inside of your self got confronted?

Mary: I would still tend to get fairly angry or I would get self punishing as an avoidance of going into the deeper emotions. I would beat myself up or I would beat you up emotionally.

One of the two!

Mary: Yes.

In order to stop yourself from getting to the truth! A few months ago you sort of got exhausted with that process as well, so can you describe some of the emotions you were feeling to everyone about how that eventually exhausted you as well, how you got into that state of exhaustion of resisting all the time.

Mary: Well I wasn't really progressing, I wasn't clearing things, my Law of Attraction was such that there was a lot of conflict happening because I suppose that's what was happening inside of me, with yourself, with my family, with my friends. I would think I had dealt with something and it would re-occur. I was tired of trying to keep an even keel in my life, because that's what I was doing in all of my relationships and within myself. I will deal with this but then I will try and make everything else okay.

So there were quite a few blockage emotions then that you were working through in terms of still wanting the truth in your heart but not being able to live it in your life?

Mary: Yes because one of my big emotions has been about self-protection, and making everyone else happy around me. So I felt like if everyone was happy around me, I felt very safe, and so a lot of my behaviour for a long time had been related to being a nice girl, a good girl, someone who looked after everyone else. I would say I want truth, I want to live in it and then a big emotion about that would get confronted and I would struggle.

Now you said at the beginning that you felt yourself to be a really moral, truthful person, by this stage what were you starting to feel about yourself?

Mary: Pretty bad about myself, well actually I just felt more confused about myself. I still had the story running in my head that I'm a nice, good girl and taking on a lot of the conflict with my family, "Oh it's my fault because I haven't been a nice, good girl." So then I was starting to feel, "Maybe I'm actually an awful person?" and was getting into these very self-punishing emotions.

During this phase of trying to face up to the truth with what was happening with the family, what was going on there?

Mary: A lot of conflict because I had this emotion that, "This is all my fault." That's what I was attracting from them as well.

They were basically saying, "It's your fault, that you are saying all these things, all these things are not true, it's your fault."

Mary: "You've ruined our family."

Okay, now what caused you to change from... so at this point you would still say that you were in a way resisting truth, in your heart truth wasn't a joyful thing, it was a painful thing all the time. So what caused this transition between truth being a painful thing and truth being a joyful thing?

Mary: I just realized that I was tired out and I recognized on some level that truth was really important. So I made this decision, it was an intellectual decision. I'm going to tell the truth about everything all the time no matter what happens and that was really confronting in our relationship because I was still going through a lot of turmoil and I really wanted you to feel secure in the relationship. But I decided, "No that's it, I'm just going to tell the truth all the time," so I launched into that. I prayed a lot about knowing what God's Truth was about me, which was a big thing, because then I found out.

Yep, okay. So what happened in that process of finding out, what went on there for you, inside of yourself?

Mary: Once I started to be really honest I recognized that my emotions were flowing a lot easier and I was starting to get deeper into the emotion.

So during this phase your emotions started coming up really rapidly and easily and you were accessing them quite easily?

Mary: Yes and then we did an exercise of a big review of my life in terms of men, because all the time we are dealing with our relationship issues. So I sat down one day and I had a page for every man, for every relationship I had ever had in my life and I started to write down not the story of what I told myself in my head about what those relationships were about but really the nuts and bolts of what happened, how I met this man, what happened when I met this man, how he treated me, how I treated him and what happened and looking at it all in black and white. Then I started to ask myself to be really honest about the emotions, was love driving me in this relationship? Doesn't really look like it, and so I started to open up to a lot of deeper emotions.

Do you mind sort of describing some of the patterns that you discovered that you didn't really think were there beforehand?

Mary: Yep okay. So I had told myself that I had always been in relationships where I was in love and that I had been quite moral in those relationships. What I found was that I had not had a lot of long-term relationships but I had different liaisons with men throughout my life. A lot of them involved alcohol when I met them. A lot of them involved sleeping with them quite early in the relationship. A lot of them involved them not giving their heart to me and me keeping them very much at a distance, feeling like I could be the more developed one in the relationship, things like that. That was quite a shock for me in terms of what I had told myself was my personal truth.

So when you started setting it out you felt a lot of emotions flow, just as you were talking about it with me.

Mary: Massive emotions, the shame and a lot of Law of Compensation issues about not loving myself, not loving them.

You started to see a separation between sex and love as well?

Mary: Definitely, yes.

When you started getting to the bottom of that you also had a huge sensation of relief. I'm just wondering whether you could describe that?

Mary: It was like my soul was doing a little jig, like, "You are finally facing truth inside of you," and I could just feel how of all these of emotions were leaving me. I could feel the patterns that I had had in my relationships leaving me and finally my soul was saying the mental thing about love and sex that I had always had running. It was finally coming together in my soul and I had this really emotional experience of really emotionally realizing that when my soul is in truth it's ready to receive Divine Love. Before then I'm just blocking it at every turn. When I can see myself in terms of how God sees me or at least be in the truth of my emotions I'm so much more receptive.

So before then you were sort of viewing all of these problems as really, really large problems weren't you? Like, "How was I ever going to resolve any of these issues because they are really, really large?" What were you feeling now after you had these experiences, what were you feeling how big were the problems were then?

Mary: Well they were leaving me really quickly, I was feeling connected to you in a way that I have never felt connected. Whereas before I had been so afraid to really go down into the deep, dark depths of all of this man stuff, because I felt, "Well what if I'm a really bad person and then we can't be together?" or any of that. The converse happened in that I just felt a deep connection with you and I felt that finally things were righting themselves in my soul that they were leaving me quickly.

So before then you were feeling really stuck for a fairly long period of time and now within a space of days things were leaving quite rapidly and working through things quite rapidly and feeling really different. A lot of emotions were leaving you really rapidly now, so how did you find in terms of your relationship with yourself? Did you still have this deep shame and guilt feelings that you were carrying around before then?

Mary: No, there are still some there but it was a much lighter load. I felt really high on truth because I had finally found truth inside of me. I wasn't trying to hide anything I wasn't trying to make anyone happy any more, it was quite liberating.

Did it feel hard anymore?

Mary: No and I felt like, "I want truth, I want everyone to tell me the truth." Before, because I had all of my pleasing emotions I didn't want to say the truth to others because maybe that would upset them. Also I didn't want to hear it from them because that would definitely upset me. And now I felt a lot freer in my interactions with other people just to say exactly how I felt and to hear exactly how they felt.

So now when you think about truth, like before when you were thinking about truth the feeling I would have from you was like almost panic, like there's this feeling of terrible...

Mary: What am I going to find in there?

"What am I going to find? How bad? Dark? Whatever it's going to be." Now when you think about truth what do you feel about it now?

Mary: Really excited.

So I suppose what we have been trying to do is just illustrate this transition that occurs if you are willing to face all of these things truthfully. You can see that at the beginning Mary was finding it really difficult. By the way I have been through very, very similar experiences to Mary in my own life. Initially lots of resistance to truth, lots of emotional pain as a result of the resistance to the truth and so forth. Working through these emotions and actually allowing yourself to see the things that you are totally ashamed of and all these different things. And ironically when you do that, there is this huge relief and also because the truth has opened up a pathway within you now, the emotions are now going to be flowing very, very rapidly and very consistently. And there is a feeling you have now when you are feeling emotions compared to what you were feeling before, what are those kinds of feelings you have now? When you are feeling your emotions?

Mary: It feels like a relief, it's like I had the emotional realisation that processing actually makes emotions leave your soul and it changes your soul. I feel like bring it on, you know, I want to be triggered, whereas before I was sort of tip toeing around it all.

You also mentioned that while you are feeling emotions, that's when you feel the most real now.

Mary: Definitely.

Like you feel like your authentic self.

Mary: Definitely. And I also have really emotional feelings about truth, I feel quite emotional talking about it and it feels like a really beautiful thing to tell the truth, to feel the truth, to feel the truth about God and I actually feel so much more open to God and closer to God.

So instead of viewing truth as a painful experience like you were before, now you are viewing truth as just a pleasure to have and to live in it. Thanks, darling.

### 7. When we love truth in our lives is when we are praying for Divine Truth

The reason why I wanted Mary to describe that for you is that she has obviously recently gone through those experiences and they are fairly alive in her mind and her feelings still. I wanted to connect with you on a number of levels and help you understand what kind of emotions you would go through once you make this transition from actually wanting to not feel truth in your life into this transition of just absolutely loving truth in your life. When you get to the state of absolutely loving truth in your life, that's when you are really praying or longing for Divine Truth from God!

Until that point you're not really longing for God's Truth to enter you, in other words you're not really praying for truth. What you are doing is praying to avoid truth because remember it's the emotional state of your soul that causes God's soul to respond. So when you are in this state of desiring to avoid truth in your life, what you are actually doing is praying to God to please keep truth away from me. That's really what you are doing.

As soon as you allow yourself to actually feel this deep longing for truth, which is this transition into the third sphere that we are talking about, once you make this transition you will have this great longing for truth in your life and you will have a feeling of joy and sometimes euphoria of actually learning a new truth about yourself. Not about the Universe now, but about yourself. So you know that euphoric experience you have when you are learning the truth about the Universe? Well you will start having those kinds of experiences learning the truth about yourself. Not only will you have those experiences but also you will actually feel the truth entering you. You will feel the truth entering you and you will feel the error leaving you. You will feel the relief of the error leaving you.

8. Emotions that prevent our love of truth

Now that's the process that we want to talk about because you will notice at the beginning that Mary felt that she was quite truthful in her relationships with others and so forth but then coming to realize that actually the truth wasn't happening at the emotional level was a real big... you could say almost a negative experience, in the sense of these terrible feelings of shame and guilt and so forth pass over you. Once you get through that feeling you will no longer have this terrible feeling about truth in your life. So one of the core emotions that all of us at some point all of us will need to face is this reason why we want to avoid truth, the reason why we have this attraction towards knowing everything externally and a very, very big distraction from knowing things about what is going on inside of myself.

What we want to do is get to the point where we want everything. Now Law of Attraction events will tell you whether you really want truth or not in your life. For example you might find yourself getting distracted a lot in your life. Who is finding that? Finding your self quite distracted? That's because you don't have an internal desire yet for truth. Allow yourself to feel about that emotionally, allow yourself to feel the emotion of that, there is a reason behind it.

With any of these things never condemn yourself; judgement of your self is just as pointless and fruitless, aside from that it does have fruitage and unfortunately most of the fruitage of judgement is very negative. It is pointless to judge yourself or another. Stop judging yourself and allow yourself to see the truth of yourself and so with everything we talk about if you are avoiding truth in your life allow yourself to see that you are. Acknowledge that you are and start talking to God that you are, why you are, what are the fears you have inside of you?

When you have this seeking attitude towards truth... and initially it's going to be more intellectual than emotional. Because initially you love the truth, you love the external truth and you are realize you have got to start hitting the internal truth intellectually, but as you can see from Mary's experience, emotionally it's hurting at that point. Every truth that hits you is like a condemnation of yourself. So in that state we are often here, (AJ points to his forehead) "Yeah I want to get the truth, I want to get the truth, I want to understand the truth about myself," but here in my emotions I'm saying, "Oh truth no, truth no, no, no." And we try and prevent the truth from hitting us emotionally.

8.1. Shame and embarrassment

Understand there is an emotion behind that as well, there is an emotional reason why I'm condemning this personal truth from ever touching me. Allow yourself to investigate why. Most of the time, for Mary, there was this deeper issue of personal shame, which Mary had to experience. For different people it's different things but a lot of times it's to do with shame and embarrassment.

If you look at way, way back in your history as a child how many times were you placed in a situation of shame when somebody found the truth out about you? You wet your pants and your siblings or your parents told people. How did that feel? Shame! So what did you do then? You didn't want anybody to know anything, did you then? Can you see straight away just that one event and a single event like that's going to cause shame to be attached to truth? In my heart now I will have a feeling that truth is shameful. Straightaway just from that one experience and can you see in my childhood I might have had 20 or 30 or 50 events. If I have been abused sexually I might have 100, 200 of those experiences of shame connected with truth.

Many of us have family shames that were covered up. How many of you have experienced that? Where maybe there was an alcoholic parent or whatever, and we are covering up this shame in the family; these are obviously connections then between shame and truth. Truth becomes a very shameful thing then, so shame will be one of the attributes of truth or one of the emotions that we will need to work through before we will be able to let ourselves seek truth.

Allow yourself to work through the blockages for you seeing your own truth. When you do that Divine Truth about you can enter you, but if you refuse if you block that still, if you keep those blockages there, you are actually placing a barrier, there is actually energetically, emotionally; there is this force field barrier around you.

To be frank with you, when I'm speaking with you I can feel it so strongly when people come up to me and say, "Could you tell me the truth about this?" and I'm actually feeling quite the opposite emotion in many cases from you. What I'm feeling is that you don't want to know the truth about that particular event at all. Because there is this force field barrier around you of not wanting to be emotionally triggered about what that truth is going to open in you.

Allow yourself to discover the blockages that you have to truth about your own life and about yourself entering you. When you do that what will happen is this force field barrier that's around you, surrounding you, will actually fall away and you will become completely open and vulnerable to truth.

Initially that's going to be a very scary prospect; can you understand why? "That means every single person in my life is going to find out about who I really am. How scary is that? And I will find out about who I really am." How scary is that? What will happen is we will go through this transition phase of getting out of this state where we are trying to block truth from us, into this state where I'm now allowing truth to enter me no matter how bad it seems. Now that in itself is a transition that occurs in the second sphere. Once I get to this stage where I have released all the emotions of that I'm now in a state where I'm longing for the truth to enter me. Now I'm in the state that can connect to God almost permanently or close to permanently because now I'm open to God's Truth also entering me.

Remember you can think of God's Truth, as the doorway to God's Love so every time you allow God's Truth to enter you, you also are now establishing a connection with the Holy Spirit and therefore Divine Love can enter you under those circumstances if you long for it. So prayer for Divine Truth are such an important thing and again remember I'm saying longing or seeking for Divine Truth is prayer for Divine Truth.

### 9. Qualities of Divine Truth

In a talk many months ago I gave a talk about the qualities of Divine Truth. Do you remember that talk, where I listed about fifteen different qualities of Divine Truth? Some of you may have seen that on DVD. Now what I'm going to go through next for the rest of the afternoon is looking at the qualities of Divine Truth, and examining how that affects us emotionally inside of us. In other words what we are doing is starting to look at, what is one of the qualities of Divine Truth and how does this does this quality effect me firstly intellectually? But then how is this quality eventually going to affect me emotionally? How am I going to feel about it inside of me once I have these realizations and once I can see what is going on with the Divine Truth and the relationship between Divine Truth and my own truth?

So that's why, under the section "Reminders of Divine Truth" I have listed many of those qualities of Divine Truth one by one. So you've got that in your outline. So let's look at some of these qualities of Divine Truth.

10. Divine Truth is infinite

So let's look at this one: Divine Truth is infinite.

Now how is this eventually going to affect me emotionally? What do you think? If I realize at the soul level that Divine Truth is infinite, how is that going to affect me on an emotional level inside of my soul at some point in the future do you think? Let me ask this question in a different way. What do most religions believe about truth? They have a certain set of rules, or they might have the Bible as the basis, or the Koran as a basis, or some other holy book as a basis; a certain set of rules. What do they feel about all of those rules?

That's it. There is no other. That is it. Now if I feel that Divine Truth is infinite, will I any longer start saying that what I now know is it? No. So can you see that me understanding that at the soul level, that Divine Truth is infinite automatically places me in a state of humility? Can you see that?

If I understand that Divine Truth is infinite where do I know I am? Let's say infinite is way up there somewhere. Obviously infinite is hard to describe, one hundred billion truths up there. Where am I in relationship to that? I'm down here maybe knowing one, two, three or whatever it is. Oftentimes when I'm beginning, aren't I? So can you see that me understanding this is where I am and this is where God's Truth is, can you see straight away that's going to place me in a situation of feeling humble. Understanding that actually if I connect to God all this truth can become mine, if I'm open, if I understand that Divine Truth is infinite. What else does it do? Knowing that Divine Truth is infinite?

Participant: It makes us feel small.

Well yeah I don't feel that myself. It makes me feel humble but not small. Obviously if it makes me feel small then that's an error within me because God actually feels that I am the greatest of his creations so if God feels that I am the greatest of her creations and I feel small, then there is an error in me that needs to be released. So allow yourself to feel that emotion. So I'm not saying don't feel that emotion but I am talking about what kind of things it can do for me in my own progression. If Divine Truth is infinite and I'm down here with a finite amount of truth, how am I going to get from here to there?

Participant: Have a longing for it.

I'm going to have a longing for truth, but what kind of things are going to happen in my life to help me get from here to there? What is God's messenger of Truth?

Participant: The Law of Attraction.

The Law of Attraction is going to now help me get from here to there, right? If I understand that God's Truth is infinite, I will actually love the Law of Attraction. How many of you love your Law of Attraction? Not many at the beginning, right? At the beginning what do we do with our Law of Attraction? "Oh no, not another thing!" This is how we feel about our Law of Attraction, isn't it? What happens when we understand emotionally that Divine Truth is infinite, we start understanding actually emotionally that actually the Law of Attraction is this beautiful thing. It's going to bring me all these truths that I didn't understand before; it's going to be God's messenger of Truth to me. Isn't that wonderful, don't you think?

Participant: I'd say it continuously stimulates your curiosity towards God's Universe.

Yeah, that's right. So me being open to that truth can you see how straight away that it's going to affect me emotionally on a lot of levels? Many of us at the moment are very adverse to our Law of Attraction. So that means in one way that we are yet to accept emotionally that Divine Truth is infinite and the only way to get there is through the messenger of truth which is our own Law of Attraction; God's messenger to ourselves.

10.1. Truth exposes error

Participant: Just an interesting point I was doing an overview of reality, what we are talking about, just from a governing point of view it's an interesting concept. It's probably quite controversial because if you establish your own sense of right and wrong, in truth, in relation to your personal concept of God and that concept is not held by a State or any of their appointees i.e. the major churches, then it would be politically challenging for those who seek to politically control, through controlling your belief systems or your concept of God, because it's direct relationship with God as you envisage it and as you grow and if you are working with the fundamental love of truth, when was the last time we were governed by anyone who told us the truth? So it could be quite a personally expensive exercise in terms of the confrontation you will experience.

It will be very much so, very much so. What you say is very true, every single step we make into truth will confront every single thing around us and of course one of the things around us is the creation of our own self, our governmental system; that's going to be confronted, your financial system is going to be confronted, the medical system is going to be confronted. Every system you could possibly consider as a system on Earth; a religious system and so forth are all going to be confronted, every single one of them just by you connecting to God in truth.

Participant: The concept of unity would be interesting then, if everyone was doing that.

If everyone was doing that!

Participant: For a concept of unity in a social group of society you would have to break down the whole sociological structure of society in terms of stuff, a new concept...

That will happen naturally because everyone is practicing love it would happen without any disasters and without any deaths and without any... do you know what I mean?

Participant: Who is going to conduct the orchestra? It'll be a lot of fun!

Yes and this is the thing. In the spirit world in the higher spheres this is what happens, everyone does come together based on desire, based on their true emotions, but because it's happening in love and truth everything happens a lot easier. Last week we talked about the idea of a Divine Love community and one of the beauties of having a Divine Love community and developing it in a way that's harmonious with love under all circumstances, even during the formulation of it, means that all of you at some point who are involved in it are going to be confronted emotionally about emotions that you are now holding on to in the real world because you think, "Oh this is the real world and I have got to live in the real world and I have to do what the real world says." The beauty of truth is that it exposes all of those things as well.

Don't be afraid of truth, of the truth in your life, don't be afraid of what it's going to accomplish because it's going to accomplish the most beautiful transformation of your soul. At the moment many of you just don't believe it. That's fine but at some point in the future when you make that transition into the third sphere you will understand how beautiful the truth is. It's just an amazing thing that leads you to every other universal thing you could ever learn, is all based around it.

Participant: Getting back to this topic, soon after watching the DVD's, before you even mentioned it I think, my experience was that the re-orientation just opened everything up and I could tell that what you were saying was complete, there was nothing that wasn't there. There wasn't much more that could be said but there was no limit to this. So I could get into the experience and what this showed me was that there was no limit to the growth of my own soul. I could just keep progressing and strangely enough I could see how small I was perhaps but also felt that I was much more comfortable with where I was with this view of everything ahead of me. So it helped a great deal.

It's a lovely secure place in a way isn't' it?

Participant: It is, yes.

10.2. Seeking truth

Because what's happening inside of us is that most of us feel this deep feeling inside of us before we even, before we ever see the truth. Most of us have sought the truth for much of our life, and we have been having this deep seeking emotion but never really finding it. So every truth that we came against we usually got pretty enthused about then we found some holes with it and we go, "Oh no" We feel that feeling of disappointment and then we go on to another truth and we found some holes in that and, "Oh no." Another feeling of disappointment then after a while we start feeling there is probably no truth and then we start taking on this sort of New Age viewpoint, where there is your truth and there is my truth and we start going along with that. But that never really feels satisfying to the soul either and so we get into this state where we start getting really, really disappointed with our search for truth.

Then once we get the real truth presented to us that feeling turns into a feeling of euphoria because we now feel so attracted to this real truth that's being presented to us. There is a reason for that and that is that God made our soul to resonate with her truth. So everything within our soul eventually will finish up resonating with God's soul with regard to truth. That will be a progressive state obviously because God's soul is infinite and God's Truths are infinite. But as I'm progressing towards God I'm becoming more and more infinite in my capacity to understand God's Truth as well. The beauty of it's now that I don't have this terrible feeling of loss and emptiness and this terrible feeling that my life is pointless and all those other emotions that all come along with the emotion of not understanding what the truth is and so the truth just has this beautiful ability to open up everything within myself. Very powerful!

Participant: I think also the tendency to attempt to assess where you were and obviously you are going to feel uncomfortable in doing that.

Yes!

Participant: The fact that ultimately you can't ever do that meant that you could just settle back into what was actually going on. Just live that.

Exactly! Instead of trying to measure it in where you are now. The way I look at it is if progression to truth and love is infinite then I'm in baby land because infinite is pretty large, right? I'm in baby land and in one hundred years time I'm still going to be in baby land and in fact probably in a thousand years time I'm still going to be in baby land, compared to the infinite truth that God has. Once you settle into that you stop finishing up trying to compare yourself with everyone around you and comparing yourself with yourself a lot of the time as well. Understanding inside of yourself that the truth is infinite has this ability of actually calming you and causing you to settle in a state of peace. So when that emotion enters you, you will feel that peace come to you because of understanding it emotionally. Intellectually it causes a lot of different things than that. So if it's not yet an emotion in you intellectually you will go. "Oh boy that means for the rest of my life I will still be looking for truth and I will never find out what that is," and you have a lot of these intellectual things going on that trigger certain emotions in error within you that need to be released. Until I have this transition emotionally and when I have this transition emotionally about truth being infinite then all that starts to disappear. All right, what's the next one?

11. Divine Truth is Absolute

The next one is, Divine Truth is of itself, a thing apart, and admits of no variations or modifications. So let's put that into a more single word: Divine Truth is absolute.

Now most of the time when I say that to a group that has never met me before there is this huge barrage of anger that comes at me, like, "Wham!" The reason why is because nobody wants to feel that somebody other than them selves knows the absolute truth and there is an emotion behind that. Well how do you feel if somebody came up to you and said, ''Do you know the full truth about yourself?'' and you say, ''Yeah of course I do.'' And they said, ''No you don't, you don't know this, you don't know that, you don't know this, you don't know that.'' Imagine that. If God could speak to you directly and you are open enough to hear it, God could do this with you. He could list all of the things within you that you're not being truthful about. There might be a thousand of them. How do you think that's going to feel? It's pretty confronting at the start.

But once I understand the Divine Truth is absolute it actually simplifies my entire life. You see before, I was thinking that, "Oh that person has some truth, this person has some truth and all of our truths are my truth or your truth," and all those sort of New Age concepts. They all get very intellectually and philosophically confusing, do they not? And you're saying to yourself, "But yeah that person just stole from me and he is saying that that was his truth? I don't get that." You know what I mean? There are lots of things you don't get in that.

There was this one guy that I met that who was talking to his partner and he was saying, ''Yeah I cheated on you last week, but you know, that's your Law of Attraction and that's your truth and this is my truth. The truth is you could look at it differently; you could look at it like I wasn't cheating on you." He was going down this philosophical road to actually detune himself from his own Law of Compensation in order to placate his woman so they could stay together. But he was using all of these, what I would call New Age, and intellectual, philosophical mumbo jumbo in order to detune from truth. That's what he was doing. How does the wife feel under this circumstance? Like does she ever feel "Oh okay"? Like, "This is okay. It's an okay event; he cheated on me it's an okay event." Is she feeling this inside of herself? Obviously not!

When you know the truth is absolute, in other words not him and not her, but God knows the absolute truth about that event, and all we need to do is find what that absolute truth is about that event, that means that both parties can now progress towards the absolute truth. That also means of course that both parties are now going to progress towards being closer together. Does it not? Because they are now finding absolute truth! They may be closer together emotionally or they might decide to be apart but they are still going to be closer together than they ever were when they were together because of accepting the Divine Truth on the subject. This is the beauty of the truth being absolute. It doesn't need modification. Ever!

11.1. Divine Truth is absolute but progressive in its discovery

God's Truth will never need modification in the future. By the way I will make modifications about what I tell you. Why? Because I will learn more truth about what I'm telling you, and as I learn more truth, I'll have to say, "Oh my understanding of that wasn't true," and I will have to admit what the new truth is. Every one of us is going to have to do that in our own progression in our own lives.

There is this common viewpoint towards me that I know all the truth. Is that possible? No. Okay. So why do you expect it? It's not possible. The only person that knows all the truth is God. God is infinite in her capacity to understand all the truth. Am I God? No. I'm your brother. So am I ever going to be in that state? No, never. I'm never going to be in that state. All I can do is connect to God as much as I can possibly connect to God.

Now obviously when I am at-one with God and then as I grow more and more and more in love, after at-onement I am going to connect to God even stronger and more strongly and more strongly. The more strongly I'm connected to God the more truth I know, but I'm never going to know it all. Ever!

11.2. If we seek first Divine Love, truth will be added to us

If you expect me to then you're in error, and if you expect yourself to you are in error too, you are never going to know it all. What you will know though is going to be far in excess of what the average person knows the reason why that's the case is because there is another truth and that's as you receive Divine Love, if you seek Divine Love first in your life all these other things will be added to you. All of these other things are all of the truths of the Universe that other people spend eons of time, like literally hundreds of thousands of years trying to discover, you will discover in five minutes. So there are all these truths.

11.3. Learning truth from God

There are literally hundreds of thousands, if not more, of these kinds of truths that you will discover in five minutes that other people have taken one hundred years to discover. Because you are on the Divine Love Path and they are on the Natural Love Path. So how do you discover them? You say to God, "I want to know about this truth" and God tells you.

What is the other way to discover it? You are going to have to do experiment after experiment after experiment after experiment with your own life, until you sort of think that you've got all the experiments down pat that you could ever come up with that would seem to prove this particular truth. And you know what? Even after you have done that you will still not know it. You will just believe it to be the true.

What man is doing now is investigating the creation in order to find truth, but God's Truth is absolute, you don't have to investigate the creation, you've just got to investigate the Creator. Once you connect with the Creator, the Creator has the ability to tell you all these truths. But if you refuse to connect with the Creator then yes you are going to have to, if you want truth in your life, seek truth in this different way; this way of experimentation.

When I understand the Divine Truth is absolute within my soul, it just simplifies my life so much. I no longer have to experiment so much with truth. All l need to do is start facing the truth from God's perspective and I will know whether I have gotten tuth from God's perspective because if I'm not receiving Divine Love I am out of harmony with truth in that particular thing. When I am in harmony with truth, Divine Love will flow. When I am out of harmony with truth Divine Love won't flow, straight away I have got a yes or no answer from God. Can you see that? As soon as I am in harmony Divine Love flows, I know that's truth and I have sorted the question out in a few minutes. Questions that people have been asking for hundreds, sometimes thousands and sometimes tens of thousands of years! You will get answers to in a few minutes because of that.

So Divine Truth being absolute is really essential. What's the next one?

12. Divine Truth is fully harmonious with Divine Love

Truth and love are always in harmony with each other. In fact if there is truth, so called truth without love, or love without truth, then none of them are real. The only way that love is real is by acting fully harmonious with truth. So we can say Divine Truth is fully harmonious with Divine Love.

How does this affect me emotionally? At the emotional level when I understand that Divine Truth is fully harmonious with Divine Love, I can understand the relationship of why I don't receive Divine Love. Because the only time when I am not going to receive Divine Love is when I am out of harmony with Divine Truth. So that makes everything really simple, for me to understand what is going on. I already know that I am out of harmony, I don't have to work out, am I out of harmony? How do I find out whether I am out of harmony? Well you already know. If you are not receiving Divine Love you're out of harmony. That makes life really simple. Just to know that. It might not make it that simple discovering why you're out of harmony, but remember your Law of Attraction is your messenger of truth, so that's already telling you this particular aspect of where you are out of harmony with, so that simplifies that entire process.

Many people say to me that they expect to receive Divine Love as soon as they ask for it. Now the "if" I would have to put in front of that's "if" I am in harmony with Divine Truth I can expect to receive Divine Love when I ask for it. Can you see the difference between those two states? Many people on the Divine Love movement around the world think they are receiving Divine Love, or they should be receiving Divine Love, when they are not because they refuse to bring their life into harmony with Divine Truth. So can you see how essential truth is in this relationship, this relationship between truth and love? You notice too I also said in the outline, "If I'm praying for this truth I will not inside of myself feel unjustly treated by God if I'm not receiving Divine Love under a certain circumstance," will I? I will understand straight away that I'm not receiving Divine Love because I am not in harmony with Divine Truth on this, whatever the matter is or whatever the groups of matters are, generally.

12.1. When we become at-one with God our personal truth will match Divine Truth

Obviously the process of becoming at-one with God is, when I am at-one with God, and this is the transition that occurs between the seventh and the eighth sphere, my truth now will match God's Truth. In other words, all of my personal truth, all of the emotions I have within me match God's emotions about all of the same subjects. It doesn't mean I'm some kind of controlled robot, what it means is I have complete free will, complete individuality. In fact you will find that you have far more individuality than you have right now, because right now most of us are living our lives in harmony with what everyone else wants us to live in. You will live your life totally in a state of free will but every single emotion within you in that place will be harmonious with love and harmonious with truth. That's a really powerful place to live in for your own life, for enjoying your own life.

13. Divine Truth does not compromise even for the sake of peace

Now the next one, Divine Truth does not compromise even for the sake of peace. This is where we start having a lot of personal trouble isn't it? How many decisions do we make in a single day where we compromise the truth, or we don't speak the truth from our emotions, because we know if we say it something not so good might happen as a response on the other end? Well Divine Truth doesn't do that, ever. Divine Truth never compromises itself for the sake of peace. God never compromises with you, ever. God will never compromise with you. That's fantastic because it means when you understand love relationships, none of them get compromised ever either.

At the beginning we often feel that we need to compromise, don't we, for peace? So how many of you in your life in the past have believed that love would compromise under certain situations? So quite a lot of us! The truth is that love will never compromise under any situation. Love will never compromise and can never compromise for the sake of peace. So let's look at what is going on inside of us emotionally here. If I have a feeling in me that I have got to withhold the truth from somebody or I have got to not say the truth because it will make them upset, can you see straight away I'm no longer in harmony with Divine Truth?

Participant: But it's not peace either.

It's not peace either, it's a fictional creation of peace; it's not real. The soul is in total disharmony with the other person but we are both saying, "Oh that's not happening." The truth is that once I don't compromise truth within myself for the sake of peace, I'm bringing myself more in harmony with Divine Love. Under those circumstances I'm praying to God, I'm praying to God for Divine Truth. If I compromise for the sake of peace at that particular moment I'm not praying for Divine Truth. I'm saying to God, "I don't want your Divine Truth, I don't want even my truth and I certainly don't want the truth that that person is going to hammer me with if I say the truth to them." Divine Truth never does that, ever.

Ironically when everybody gets in the state emotionally of accepting that truth, there is the most peace. Why is there the most peace? Because we are all focused on wanting to know what the Divine Truth is and living in harmony with Divine Love when we are in that state. So ironically that's when there is the most peace.

For example if my partner comes to me and tells me something about her life, like last week, "You know that guy that I met down the street?" "Yes." "Well, I slept with him." Now that's a pretty confronting thing to hear if you are in a relationship, isn't it? Now she's not compromising for the sake of peace, what she's doing is she's telling me the truth of something she did.

13.1. Not compromising for peace involves owning our emotions

My feeling is if I don't compromise for the sake of peace, I will actually own my own emotions. I won't compromise my own emotions. I won't just get a bit angry, walk around the place for a day or two and then say, "All is forgiven," because it's highly unlikely that I'm actually forgiving by doing that.

I will actually work through it emotionally; I will actually work through the event emotionally. I will let myself feel my emotions about it and I won't compromise those emotions either for the sake of peace. Because if I did, what I would actually be doing... so let's say I started compromising my emotions because I wanted her to stay with me, I'm not addressing in her or myself the reason why she did it in the first place. There are reasons in her emotionally why she slept with someone else other than myself if we are in a committed relationship, and I need to allow myself to look at that emotionally and she needs to look at that emotionally. If I compromise the truth in that situation she may never look at that emotionally and I may never look at it emotionally, but where are we, we are both not harmonious with love or God.

In the end even in those events we need to not compromise for the sake of peace, even when you have made a mistake, don't compromise for the sake of peace. Admit your error and the emotion in you will come up, you will be able to feel those emotions you will be able to work through those emotions and release them; but you will never touch the emotion if you compromise the truth of the emotion. You will never even work through the emotion then, ever. So for the majority of us the emotions are not rising because we're not being truthful about what is actually there and we need to become truthful about what is actually there before these emotions will flow.

Well there are another ten or eleven points I would like to cover after the break, so we will have a break now and then we will cover some more points about Divine Truth.

Longing for Divine Truth: Part 2

This discussion about truth is quite often pretty confronting because a lot of the time what we are doing is we are always trying to get away and run away from the truth initially. So when we are presented with truth we often are just so confronted with it that we say, "Ooh you mean in this situation I have got to be truthful too," and, "Oh in that situation I have to be truthful too?" Yes, in the end I'm saying in every situation you are going to be totally truthful. It doesn't matter what the situation is, you will never want to cover over the truth. In fact what is going to happen in your life is you will have a burning and passionate desire to live in truth 100% of the time and in fact you will find yourself so enthusiastic about it that it's impossible for you not to live in that state. So if I'm not yet in that state then obviously there are emotions of error that I need to work my way through. That's all I need to do.

The reason why it's such an important issue is that unless I'm in that state, every truth that I'm ever confronted with is going to feel so painful. It's going to be so stressful; it's going to be such a nightmare to face. It's a bit like, at the moment each of us have a castle that we have constructed around our soul and every attack on that castle is going to be defended generally by us very vigorously and that's the issue we face. What we need to do is get out of that state and into a state where we're no longer defending the truth.

My Law of Attraction today was interesting because in my break I had two men approach me and both of them unbeknown to themselves were in a state of vigorously defending their own truth and yet not wanting to know that. No matter what I say to those people I know that they cannot accept the truth that I'm telling them. In one case it was because you felt you already knew it and in the other case it was because anything emotionally was obviously not the truth, he wanted the truth to be intellectual.

14. Divine Truth is emotional, not intellectual

Remember right at the start of this discussion I said that the truths would be emotional and not intellectual. If you think you know the truth about yourself intellectually but you have yet to have the emotional experience, trust me you do not know the truth. You don't know the truth yet until you have the emotional experience. The intellectual experience is a part of it, in the sense of knowing what the truth is intellectually can help you have the emotional experience, but until you have had the emotional experience you will not know the truth, you just think you do. That state by the way is a very damaging state to you because you are going to believe that state and you are going to think you know things that you are yet to really know at the soul level. It takes a lot of effort to get out of that state and into the state of feeling the truth emotionally and having a desire to feel it emotionally inside of your self and actually really feeling what it is emotionally.

That's why the next time we get together I'm talking about the subject of "Emotions of Self-Deception" because almost everyone that comes up to talk with me, most of the time have deep emotions of self deception and often when I identify those emotions of self-deception they say, "I already know that." And they don't know it, because if they knew it they would already be feeling it and they're not feeling it. It would be more correct to say, "I am intellectually aware of that." But the truth is that doesn't help you.

On the website I have written a document called "Divine Love, Repentance and Forgiveness ". I talked about this process of soul realization and intellectual realization. There are five or six steps in the process of becoming intellectually aware that you have an issue that is not in harmony with love and truth, but you know you can go through every one of those intellectual steps, which by the way are generally essential as an adult to go through. You can go through every one of those steps and still never release an emotion and never change your Law of Attraction. Many of us are doing this by holding onto emotions of self-deception. That's why I wanted to have that subject coming up soon to talk about.

To actually have the soul changes occur there is a whole other process that needs to occur and it has to occur at the heart level, the soul level, and the emotional level, that's the level it has to occur on. When those processes occur then the Law of Attraction changes instantly and everything around you changes instantly as a result of your soul condition changing as you release the emotion.

Most people I find are very fascinated with the intellectual process of realization and most people come up to me and say, "I know that, I know that, I know that," and I'm feeling, "No, no, no, you don't get this yet because you are saying you know that but actually, no, you're not feeling that." So why is there this huge discrepancy, what's going on? There are blockages to the feeling of it. Many of us will stay in that state for as long as we want and you will stay in that state because free will dictates the state that you stay in, but it's not going to be very good for you in the long run staying in those states. What we want to do is get out of that state.

15. Facing personal truth

One thing Mary and I didn't describe was that Mary first went through this discussion, when she was describing to you this process she went through a few weeks ago of writing down her past basically, doing an inventory of her past. Initially it was done quite intellectually, wasn't it darling? You listed a lot of the stuff; you looked at it from a very positive viewpoint, looking at yourself if you like. You didn't want to look at things in a negative way and this is what the problem is for the majority of us. We do one of these inventories of our life but we want to see ourselves positively, we don't want to see ourselves as God sees us. We want to see ourselves positively in the sense of; we want to have a fictitious viewpoint of ourselves generally.

So what we will do is, we will do one of these inventories and in the end, process very little emotion and say, "Isn't it wonderful? I realized this about my father and I realized this about my mother and I realized this about my brother and sister, I realized this about all my relationships and this man he was a terrible man and that man was a terrible man," and we start going down this track of seeing all of our Law of Attraction but we don't relate it to ourselves. Instead what we do is we project all of what we are learning out on to everyone else that was in our lives and still don't see the point of it in the end it's about truth about yourself, your own condition.

When Mary and I did that first and then Mary asked me to help with the situation I then went over everything again and I said, "No but that's not the truth, that's not the truth of that relationship. The truth of the relationship is this... what's that truth telling you?" And when Mary had those realizations, she also had the emotions flowing. That's about how it happened wasn't it, Mary?

The truth is for the majority of us you are going to want to do an inventory, do some of these things, like a fear list that I have suggested to you, or an anger list or whatever else I have suggested to you but you will do it in a very untruthful way and then you will say to me, "Oh but I have done that before and it doesn't work." No it doesn't work because we're not truthful enough, in the end. That's the only thing that makes these things work.

In the end to be truthful enough means to be as truthful as God is with you. God sees absolutely every single emotion within you. Positive or negative, doesn't matter to God; He sees absolutely everything and we've got to see the same. What were our motivations? I have heard many of you come up to me and say, "Oh my motivation was this." Then I say, "No, no, no your motivation wasn't that at all, your motivation was very negative, actually, it was to do with this." "Oh no, I don't agree with you about that." No worries you don't have to agree with a word I say but I know that in the end if you don't look at that emotion you'll not progress further towards God and it's up to you what you do with that.

Many times lately I'm finding a person coming up to me and asking me a question. I give them an answer. It's not the answer they wanted to hear, it's not what they believe and so they go away saying, "AJ doesn't know what he is talking about." You can believe that, and I'm happy for you to believe that in fact. I've done all I can to help you face the truth, that's all I need to do but you're not going to progress that way, if every single interaction you have with every person you go up to and say, "What do you really feel about me or what do you really feel about my injuries?" and they tell you and then you say, "Oh they wouldn't know." In the end you're not going to look at your Law of Attraction, you're not going to see the answers that are coming at you constantly in your life. The truth is going to expose all that for you and in the end you will see things as God sees you, which is going to be the most powerful thing for you.

15.1. Judging ourselves

Participant: I was just wondering if you could do it the other way around and be overcritical of yourself instead, and judge everything the opposite?

Don't view criticism as truth, when you are over critical of yourself you are now judging yourself. I suggest that you shine a light on yourself really strongly and see absolutely every flaw, but I'm not saying that's being critical of your self. Most of you are judging it as being critical of yourself, but that isn't what I'm saying. When you shine the light of truth on you and expose absolutely everything in you, you're not being critical of yourself. You are being truthful with yourself. Critical with yourself is when you take that process and now judge it, and now judge yourself for having these things in you, now you're being critical of yourself and I'm not suggesting you do that.

Participant: No I realize that.

I am suggesting that you have to see absolutely every flaw, absolutely every single one of them within yourself. God is going to help you in that process but God isn't going to make you do it.

Participant: We've been asking for that and I think that I'm seeing more of my part in this.

You are starting to see more of yourself.

Participant: I don't blame anyone else actually but I thought you meant blaming him or her.

15.2. Blaming ourselves and others

The truth is a lot of times we say, "Oh I don't blame everyone else," but there is an emotion in me of wanting to blame others. So let's be truthful about it. For many of you when you think about the harm that's been done to you in your life by ex-partners, parents, or whatever you do feel an emotion of blame, do you not? You do feel an emotion of anger, you do feel upset, and you do feel like that. These emotions are the truth within you. Do you see what I'm saying? So don't go and tell yourself this lie then, "Oh I'm not upset with that." The truth is you are and you have just covered that over because you think being upset is not spiritual. Trust me being upset is spiritual, if it results in you digging deeper and finding the core emotion, the grieving emotion and releasing it. Being upset is not spiritual when all you do is stay in your anger and just blame everyone else instead of looking at yourself.

Participant: I end up blaming myself.

So that's the judgement.

Participant: Yes I realize that.

You've got to look at the emotional reasons why you do the judgment.

Participant: And I have been.

There will be childhood emotional reasons, always.

Participant: But I can't get past that stage where I'm aware of the actual experiencing of it but it's been very long...

Yeah but it's because you don't want to experience it.

Participant: Yeah I probably don't.

Not probably don't, you don't want to experience it. Can I just say something about a true thing here? If I'm not right now experiencing the emotion I know exists in me, I don't want to experience it. I just do not.

Participant: Right now there is also... it's just too hard.

There will be fears associated with why you don't and there will be other emotions associated as why you don't. Mary you wanted to add some things to that or...

Mary: I was just going to say that when I did my inventory, the experience that I had was that I had told myself the story about being a very moral person. So that was all in my intellect but that was a big story that I created to avoid these feelings of shame, that I must be a terrible person. So I had a lot of self-blaming emotions in there as well. What I found was when I went into it really sincerely and emotionally and when I got underneath those blame and shame emotions I could deal with the core emotions that were driving it. Then the truth that I found from God's perspective was, actually, yes I have done these things but God loves me. It was a whole new sense of faith and a loving truth as well. So I had a lot of fear about it being a very critical and blaming process as well but it actually turned out to be the opposite of that.

You see self-blame and self-shame, is the same as blaming somebody else; it's all an emotion of self-deception. It's an emotion of self-deception so it can get you away from experiencing the causal emotion. We always create emotions of self-deception in order to stay away from what the causal emotion is. So quite often someone will come to me and say, "So what is the causal emotion in me?" So I say, "These are the emotions within you, you feel very angry about that, and underneath that there is this whatever..." and they go away feeling like they have just been annihilated.

15.3. Emotions of self-deception

That's a self-deception emotion and that prevents you from accessing the real emotion, the deep grief and other emotions that you face about the truth of yourself. We will talk about emotions of self-deception in another session. You can see how the truth is related to this. Most of the time what we are doing is we are actually living in our emotions of self-deception. Most of the time that's what we are doing, until we get to at-onement with God we will be doing that, we will be living in varying degrees of emotions of self-deception. Once we get to be at-one with God you will no longer have any emotions of self-deception but until that point in time there are going to be emotions of self-deception that you need to experience.

An emotion of self-deception is there to prevent you from feeling a deeper emotion that is more painful. So many of you will kick into a self-blame emotion for example and feel terrible, you will be grieving, crying about how terrible you are. You are in an emotion of self-deception. You are allowing yourself to feel that emotion because right at that moment there is a truth you don't want to experience. And that is the emotional pain of what is underneath that emotion, which might be this terrible feeling of being unloved or unwanted or whatever else, right underneath it. And instead of letting yourself feel that you want to feel the emotion of self-deception instead because it's more easily felt and it means you can get away from the emotion underneath. Does everyone follow me?

The problem with that state is that you think you are doing the emotional work that we are talking about, but that's not true; you are not. We aren't doing the emotional work when we are in an emotion of self-deception. We are doing the emotional work when we actually get to the causal emotion. When you are in emotions of self-deception your Law of Attraction does not change. That's the way you know that you are in an emotion of self-deception. Your Law of Attraction will not change. When your Law of Attraction changes you know you have just dealt with a causal emotion. That's why your Law of Attraction is your messenger of truth.

16. Divine Truth always respects free will

Getting back to the truth issues one of the truth issues about Divine Truth is that Divine Truth is always respecting free will. So Divine Truth will never compel a person to receive the truth if it's against their will.

Do you understand what I mean by that? So this straight away gets rid of all wars, can you see how that would occur? What's a war? It's compelling another person or a group of people to accept what you feel is true, isn't' it? And you are willing to kill them to compel them, that's war. Divine Truth prevents all wars, as we will no longer allow ourselves to get involved in a situation where we are pushing another person to do anything they don't want to do. We might encourage them, we might tell them the truth about it but we will allow them to express their free will. We won't compel them with force.

Can you see how a lot parenting has a bit of a problem with Divine Truth? You look back in your lives as parents with children; can you see how many times you compelled them against their will to do something? Every time you did that you broke the Law of Divine Truth, every single time. Now for me that was like hundreds of times, hundreds of times where I did that and I have had to actually feel that emotionally, to get through that emotionally.

Respecting free will is even down to the fact that if you know somebody else doesn't want to do something and you manipulate them through a series of events, or you manipulate them with your words to get them to do it even though you know that they don't really want to do it; you are breaking the law.

Can you see how that changes a lot of interactions with all sorts of things going on in the world around us, just that. Now once I feel that in my heart I will never want to manipulate you into doing something you don't want to do. Ever! Even when I know you don't want to do it but you don't know. So let's say we have an event where I know you don't want to do something, I can feel that and you think you do want to do it, I will not ever compel you to do it under those circumstances. You think you want to do it, but your soul is where the free will comes from, not your head. If the emotion is you don't want to, then I won't be able to compel you to do it against that will, that you have within yourself. Does that make sense to everyone?

Initially when we hear that we go, "Well how will I know what everyone is feeling?" Well you don't need to worry about that yet, all we need to do is focus on the fact of free will and focusing on that first. As you progress in your own emotional condition you will feel the emotional condition of others and therefore you will know whether their will is being compelled or not when you ask them to do something or they even offer to do something for you.

I have had people offer to do things for me that I have refused because I could feel that at the free will level they don't want to actually do it for me. Or that they want to do it for me for totally different reasons than what they think they want to do it for me. Sometimes they think, "Oh I'm just being friendly," in doing something, and the feeling I'm getting is there is a transaction involved where they want me to do something in return. Or they feel that they are paying me for something I have done and we don't want to do that either.

Participant: How do you actually know, when you're coming from a position of injury, and the other person is coming from a position of injury, how do you actually know...

How do you know whether you're damaging their free will?

Participant: How do you actually know where love lies and whether you are impacting their free will? When both come from a position of injury?

The question I ask myself is, "Would I be doing this if I was at-one with God?'

Participant: But how do you know what it's like to be at-one with God if you've not been there before?

You don't need to really.... what does God do with you?

16.1. How God treats our free will

Ask yourself, "What does God do with you?" So let me give you an example. You decide you are going to drive your car on the opposite side of the road than everybody else. What does God do about that?

Participant: He allows that.

He allows that, yep. Why?

Participant: Because that's your free will choice to do that.

Okay, is it wrong from a love perspective, from a love of self perspective?

Participant: From God's perspective it's not wrong because you are exercising your free will.

Yes, but are you breaking a law of love if you do it?

Participant: In one sense you are.

Well it depends on how many cars are driving on the opposite side of the road. Can you see that? If the opposite side of the road is full of cars coming in the opposite direction to what you are driving can you see that if I decide, "Oh I'm going to drive on the opposite side of the road," what am I doing? I'm taking away their free will but I'm also now in the process of maybe damaging them or myself. Is that love? No! Okay, so it's not loving for me to do that. But if I'm driving along on this side of the road, there's not a single car on the opposite side of the road, for as far as the eye can see, what is the problem with me driving on the opposite side of the road? Not a lot at all is there? Am I breaking a law of love then? No.

Can you see every single situation is going to have specific events? Let me illustrate this further with you so that you can connect to what is going on and why I have said that. I know when I'm breaking laws of love generally towards myself, or towards the other person or towards God, generally I know. But most of the times I want to remain completely oblivious to it. Also I can ask the question, "How does God treat me?" Because how God treats me, is how I should be treating the other person. So let's take this example into a relationship. Does God tell me when I do things wrong? Do you hear a little voice in your ear that says, "You just did something wrong, you just did something wrong again, you just did something wrong again." Do you have that?

Participant: No but he created within us a conscience or a mechanism for us to come to an understanding that we have done something wrong.

Of course!

Participant: Same thing?

But where is that coming from? It's coming from the resonance within your self with God. Is it not?

Participant: Yes.

It isn't coming from somebody telling you in your ear. Now if you want to tell your partner in his ear what he is doing wrong, can you see straight away that I'm now out of harmony with love? Because it's not what God is doing with your partner. God isn't doing that with your partner. God would appeal to your partner but he wouldn't tell him what to do and tell him he is wrong all the time. Because in the end if he doesn't have a desire to know when he is wrong, then he is going to have to work on that with God in his own relationship.

Most of the time what we are doing in our relationships is we want the other person to change so we keep telling them the truth of what we feel is truth, of course, not necessarily the truth. We want them to change to suit our emotional condition, do we not? Because we are unwilling to make decisions about our own emotions and our own condition of what we believe is true. We don't want to take responsibility for our own emotions, so what we do is we get the other person to take emotional responsibility for us.

God doesn't do that either. You know God doesn't do that because God doesn't do it with you. God doesn't make you take responsibility for God's emotions. So why would you do it with another person? You see all I need to do is ask myself, "What is God doing with me?" Because whatever God is doing with me is the most loving thing and if I'm not doing that with another person then I'm out of harmony with that love. Does that make sense to everyone? There's a lot of silence. If God doesn't get in my ear 24/7 telling me everything I'm doing wrong 24/7, then if I'm doing that to another person, am I loving?

No! Of course not! So often we need to ask ourselves, "What is God doing with me?" With your children, for example, does God come along and tell you that you have got to tidy up after yourself? God doesn't, does She? Or you are driving along in your automobile down the highway putting up two tonnes of pollution every year out of your car minimum and God doesn't say; "Now you've got to clean that up." Does God say that to you? But that's what you are doing. We are doing that but God isn't saying, "You've got to clean that up." So why are you then doing it with your child? There is an emotion in the child that's being reflected by your own condition as to why they don't have enough love to tidy up after themselves. That's what you need to address, that's the truth of the matter. But telling them in their ear that they are doing it and needing them to clean it up isn't going to address that emotion. All it does is address the effect of the emotion.

Remember last week we learnt that God doesn't deal with effects, ever. God always deals with causes; that's what God wants to deal with. So if your child isn't tidying up after itself that's an issue for themselves in their own love of self, is it not? They aren't looking after their own environment therefore they don't love themselves enough to care for their own environment. And if it's in my child then it's in me. Because I created them, all of my emotions got impressed upon them. So what they are reflecting to me is that fact I'm not cleaning up or having a desire to clean up in my own environment either emotionally or physically. Because I don't have enough self love to do it and I need to work my way through that self love and help my child work its way through its self love. Then both of us will be tidying up after ourselves without having to be told.

Again it gets back to an issue of what's going on inside of us emotionally, that is the truth. So a lot of people will look at that same situation and say intellectually, "But it's wrong for the child to not tidy up after itself." When you say wrong... if you use the term unloving! Yes I agree it is unloving for the child to not look after itself, totally unloving, but let's address the reason why it doesn't want to, not the effect of why it doesn't want to. The effect is the untidy room. The reason is far different to that. If you address the causes... and remember all prayer, remember one of the things we said last week about prayer? All prayer must address causes. God cannot listen to prayer that doesn't address causes. Can you see most of the time we are not dealing with causes?

16.2. When we respect other's free will we don't make decisions for them that they wouldn't make

Can I just talk about your interaction with Graham this week, Jen, for a moment? Do you mind? Is that okay? Well you put it in the public arena, Jen, so I'm just asking whether you want to continue with it in this arena. You are allowed to say no, Jen.

Participant: That's all right.

No, but you're allowed to say no. Because the feeling I'm getting from you is that you would prefer not to.

Participant: It's okay.

Are you sure?

Participant: Yes.

It's interesting I'm having that feeling from you. Because you never asked Graham to post your stuff on the net when you posted it. Can you see how there's a bit of hypocrisy there?

Participant: Graham has posted many things about me on the Internet, so it wasn't about that, it wasn't about an issue of posting it in a public way, and it's about...

The question I'm going to ask you though is this, why do you want to post about your life on the net before it's resolved? There's an emotion in you. Now I can understand fully, posting it on the net during the process of resolution or after the process of resolution in particular; it would be good from a teaching perspective. I'm doing that with you constantly, I'm telling you about my life constantly as I have dealt with different emotions and what is going on there. But why do you want to do it with the other person about that. Do you see what I'm saying? There is an issue inside of wanting to punish publicly the other person for their behaviour.

Participant: It wasn't about that at all.

I am saying it was. But we can disagree on that and we are allowed to.

Participant: It absolutely was not about Graham. It was about coming to a realization of how I relate to Graham in terms of how I was relating to my father and that's something that you pointed out to me right back when we went sailing.

But if you reread your post you will see the focus was not your father. You mentioned your father and some things and then you went back to your relationship with Graham and you didn't want to deal with the underlying emotional cause.

Participant: I absolutely completely relate to Graham in exactly the same as way I related to my father.

I agree.

Participant: There is no difference...

But that doesn't make Graham your father.

Participant: And he relates to me like I'm his mother.

I agree.

Participant: And that's what the post was about.

I'm sorry but I don't agree with that, I don't agree that, that's what the post was about. The post was about you avoiding the core emotion.

Participant: I haven't reached the core emotion.

I know. The reason why you haven't reached it is because the whole purpose of the post was to avoid it.

Participant: Every single relationship I have ever had with men, every single one, was exposed in the moment I realized how I relate to Graham. They're exactly the same.

I agree but the emotion is not flowing in you because you are still having the emotion of self-deception. The emotion of self-deception is the blame emotion, either of your self or of Graham. Remember I spoke with you about that the last time you visited. The emotion of self-deception is the blame of either one of you. If you can't blame Graham you finish up blaming you. Agreed?

Participant: Honestly when I saw you last time we went through two and a half hours where you were exposing that many things, I don't actually remember you said that.

That's okay; I'm saying it again now, that's okay. The emotion of self-deception is the emotion where I want to blame the other person or myself. What happened is when I stopped you from blaming Graham you then went straight into blaming yourself, which is still the same self-deception emotion. Underneath the self-deception emotion is the truth emotion. The truth emotion is the one you want to avoid by doing that. So take care of the reason why you're exposing things publicly all the time. Part of that reason is because of this self-deception emotion, allow your self to dig deeper than that emotion and get to the real truth of the matter.

Whenever I'm harming the free will of another I'm not in emotional truth, when I say harming the free will of another I mean when I'm choosing to make choices that the other person wouldn't make if they had the choice, for them; then I'm harming them, do you follow me? So bear that in mind with all of your interactions. It's okay to face these truths.

It's okay to feel these truths, the truth is that I'm allowed to do whatever I want, that's one truth, but whenever I harm the free will of another person in doing it I'm going to have an automatic Law of Compensation about that. That's also another truth and when I harm the free will of another I'm actually not in harmony with Divine Truth, because it's not something God would do. To God your free will is paramount. To God you are allowed to do anything you want. God already has laws in place that cause an effect on your soul to correct you should you do something that is out of harmony with love and truth.

16.3. Reasons for lack of focus on the discussion

Participant: Hope this doesn't go off on a tangent but could you please try and explain to me why I feel so uncomfortable, and why I tune out when it seems to get on to a more personal level because I sort of... I miss things very much. So I want to know... it gets into a more emotional situation...

Right, so how many of you find yourself doing that, whenever I mention something to someone specifically about their particular situation, how many of you feel very tuned out of that discussion? Because there is quite a lot of you who you do that, quite a lot! There is a lot more than put up their hand by the way. What emotion do you feel is in you when that happens? There is an emotion inside of you when that happens.

Participant: Shame?

Personal shame! So a lot of times what I'm talking about with the person is something that you yourself have felt exists within you, agreed? And then there is this shame feeling that happens and often that feeling is not allowed to rise and so what we have a tendency to do then is not want to listen and not want to pay attention, so we start tuning out, even going to sleep. Many spirits with us do this by the way. So many of us still have spirit attachments, which are trying to help us tune out when we are looking at emotions. Why would a spirit help you tune out? Because he wants you to keep that emotion! If you keep that emotion he will be able to stay the most connected with you, but if you lose that emotion then he won't be able to be connected with you anymore.

So there are a lot of external reasons that happen to us when we start to tune out or miss things. The reason why we are doing it's because there is an emotion in us of avoidance. When I notice that happening in myself I write it down straight away because it means a big thing is underneath it generally. Avoidance of something large within myself! When I speak individually to somebody... the reason why I have chosen to do that and the reason why I have chosen to speak to Jen about that is because I know Jen's willingness to deal with her emotions and I also know that that emotion exists in many of you, but you're not owning up to it.

The emotion of wanting to expose another person and what they are doing wrong exists within many of you but you don't want to own up to it and in having this interaction with Jen we can expose that emotion; but many of you who have done that in the past want to detune from the fact that you've done it. You want to run away from the fact that you've done it, so in an interaction with Jen, the emotion, "Jen is taking all the limelight" might come up for you with that or, "Oh Jen is doing this", another emotion comes up for you and the reason why I enter into these interactions is so that those emotions come up with you.

Allow yourself to feel those emotions rather than skipping over them all the time, or blaming me or blaming Jen or whatever for the interactions that occurs. I feel her being open is a beautiful thing but many of you feel her being open is done for other reasons. So allow yourself to feel through those emotions and work your way through them. But yes whenever you feel an emotion where you're feeling yourself getting distracted or wandering off there is always an emotional core of that. So if you can allow yourself to see what caused it; and every time I have traced it back inside of myself I have noticed there was something that was said, or just a little event that occurred and immediately I was off on another planet and that was my avoidance, that's the way I got away from that. Pull yourself back into it. "What am I avoiding?" This is part of being truthful with your self.

So what is next after respecting free will?

17. Divine Truth does not conform to men's beliefs

What is the next emotion with regard to truth? That it won't allow itself to conform to men's beliefs. So if I felt that inside of myself and another person comes along and says, "Did you know AJ is a cult leader?" I'd go, "Mm, okay yeah," a bit of fear comes up with that. "Maybe that's right, I will have to investigate that and off I go and investigate it." What have I now done? If I haven't already investigated that before that was said to me, what have I done? I have allowed another person and their beliefs to influence my behaviour. Now it's great that it is because it's triggering an emotion, but I'm not in a state of love or truth of myself in that state, because if I had already resolved it I would already know what to do, whether I agree with them or not. But I wouldn't change what I do just for the sake of another person's beliefs. I can believe all I want, that what I'm saying is true. If you are changing your beliefs just because I say so, then that's an error. Can you see that? It doesn't matter who I am! If you change your belief just because I say you should, there's an error. Divine Love or Divine Truth does not conform to men's beliefs or women's beliefs.

It is very important to understand that. Can you see why? In the end all of you will come to see the truth, not because I said it to you, but because you have felt it in your own heart. This is why it is so important to open up your soul. It's the only mechanism you have for determining truth. The only one! Intellectually you can be presented with argument after argument after argument. We can tie up your mind, as long as you want intellectually to avoid any truth or to make you believe something that's not true, quite easily. Isn't that what they do with politics? They give you the "spin". Men can do this constantly and this is constantly happening in the Universe up until the 6th sphere of the spirit world where you get the "spin". But you are only going to be able to determine the truth when you feel the Divine Truth in your heart and you will no longer conform to any other person's beliefs.

How could I accept the truth in the first century when not a single person around me accepted the truth? Only by not conforming my beliefs to their beliefs! Why did I do that? Only by connecting with Divine Truth and feeling the resonance between that truth and what was in my soul by growing in love. That's the only way I'm going to determine truth, it's the only way you are going to determine truth. It will be a personal experience for you, totally personal. It has nothing to do with me, aside from the fact that I would like to help you with it. But it has got nothing to do with me; it's all to do with how strong a desire you personally have to actually connect to God in that way.

So you can be the only person on this planet who knows the truth. I have experienced that in my own life in the first century. Where I was the only person who knew the truth! It can be, if you are not at-one with God, a lonely place, but if you are at-one with God you never feel lonely so it's no longer a lonely place. You will get to the stage in your own progression where you will know what you're hearing is truth or not truth. You will know the difference between a truth and a lie not because you intellectually have worked it out but because you can actually feel the difference between one and the other. That's a pretty freeing place. Can you see that?

Participant: AJ, I was just wondering I have heard you talk about spirit spheres and things like inter dimensional travel and I was wondering what is the Divine Truth behind the idea that there are extra terrestrials and UFOs and that they are interacting with us in a way that may not necessarily be conducive to the things that we are...

Can I answer that question in a question and answer session that I'm having later in Eudlo? Today I would like to focus more on the issue of truth, not the specific truths. A very brief answer is that almost all interactions with these kinds of beings are actually spirit interactions and I'll explain how that's the case perhaps at another time, if I can do that?

Let's move onto the next one. What's the next one?

18. Divine Truth always results in freedom

Truth results in freedom. So Divine Truth always results in freedom. Let's say you are in a religious movement and all of a sudden you get presented with you must not do this, you must not to that, you must not do this, you must not do that. How free are you feeling now?

So would a religious movement in harmony with Divine Truth say you must not do anything and you must do anything? Wouldn't it instead say, "If you do this you will disconnect yourself from love, if you don't do that you will disconnect yourself from love? But you are allowed to do whatever you want"? Would a religion that's harmonious with Divine Truth ever ex-communicate somebody? No of course not, because what is ex-communication? It's, "You naughty person you're not allowed to do that so we are going to push you out." From God's perspective is the person allowed to do it? Yes. Even if it's in disharmony with love they are allowed to do it, are they not? Yes. So why would I not allow them? Can you see that straight away freedom becomes a very, very important issue?

18.1. Example of the monetary system being out of harmony with Divine Truth

Let's look at all the different things that result in a lack of freedom on the Earth. Money results in a lack of freedom on the Earth, doesn't it? If you haven't got any money you try living in places where there is no money and you will feel very severely restricted in the current environment. So what's that telling us? It's telling us that the monetary system that we currently have, doesn't love and it's not harmonious with Divine Truth and it's going to go. The more people that come into harmony with Divine Truth, the more it's going to disappear and eventually it will disappear forever. The reason why is because it's not resulting in freedom.

18.2. Example of the political system being out of harmony with Divine Truth

Let's look at the political aspect of things. Do you feel free when you are driving on the road? No. Why? Because there is so many Laws, some of which you disagree with, don't you? You drive up to a stop light. You stop, you look left and you look right. It's the middle of the night, it's 3.00am. Not a single other person on the road. You can't see a single car and you have to sit there and wait. How free does that feel? So what would a law be that's more harmonious with freedom? If there isn't a single other person on the road, to just obey the normal stop sign rules and proceed. That would be far more harmonious with love, wouldn't it? Far more harmonious with truth because it results in freedom, more freedom for you!

Anything that results in more freedom for you, as long as it also results in more freedom for the other persons around you, is going to be harmonious with love. But if it results in more 'freedom' for you and no freedom for anyone around you, then that isn't love either and it's not Divine Truth either. So if I then take the point of view, "Oh I'm free, that means I'm free to rape and pillage," then obviously that isn't harmonious with love, is it? Because freedom also results in more freedom for everyone around me! Can you see that?

It is a very important point, freedom. It's also an important point when you look at any religious format, or any political format, or any environmental format, or any whatever you can think of format, financial or so forth. If a law that they create results in less freedom for everyone involved and more restrictions then it's unloving. Quite simple!

18.3. Examples of family situations that are in harmony with Divine Truth

When I feel that in my soul I will actually feel in my own family when I have created a law that has resulted in less freedom. So to give you one, you have got a teenage girl, 15 years old, just exploring sexuality. You're daddy. Daddies often have a problem with their little girls getting involved with other men. So what do they normally do? They make all of these laws. You have got to be home by 10pm, you have to ring me here, you have to phone me here, here is a new mobile phone, and all these laws are all made really to assuage or to lesson daddy's fears. In fact laws are made generally to reduce your own fear. So are they based on love? No. So let's look at what would result in freedom. What would daddy do with the girl if he were in a state of making her freer? What would he do there? She is allowed to stay out whenever she wants, for as long as she wants with whomever she wants. However what would I also do if I were in love and truth? I would warn her of the possible dangers to her soul or the soul of others making the choices. Do you see what I'm saying? I would make her aware of those things but I would allow her to do it.

With my boys when they were 15 or so that's exactly what they did. So when they got a car, they didn't have to come home at all. Quite often I didn't know where they were for days on end and Tristan knows that to be true because he was quite often out for days on end. It didn't concern me if they were out getting drunk or whatever they were doing because I had already explained to them the consequences of breaking the laws of love, which by the way they felt on quite a number of occasions. Love of self or love of others. Can you see that this just simplifies your entire life, doesn't it? Instead of having an argument every night with your teenage son or daughter, it's quite easy. But that also means that you're not going to take away from them the effects of their choices, can you see that? In other words they don't go out and prang the car and then come home and expect you to fix it for them.

Can you see that would also not be harmonious with truth or love? Because if I were harmonious with truth I would actually say, "Actually, son, you created that, so you are going to have to fix that. And if that means your car is out of action for eight weeks, then your car is out of action for eight weeks. Sorry about that son." It's a very good Law of Attraction event demonstrating to you the importance of whatever it is. There is no need to do all of these big corrections.

Participant: I was just wondering AJ is there a discrepancy almost or a contradiction between respecting someone's free will if it contradicts Divine Love. So for example if they're breaking the law of ... I care about how somebody treats himself but I also want to respect their free will. Is one more important than the other? So if for example my 11 year old came home and said I wanted to start smoking I would love to say, "I respect your free will to do so" but I also care passionately about obviously how he looks after himself.

Whose house are they coming home to?

Participant: My home, but if it were outside shall we say or....

Okay if he says, "I am going to start smoking, mum, it's your house so I know I can't smoke inside it, is it alright if I smoke outside?" I would be saying, "Yeah, do you understand you're killing your body? Do you understand there is this emotion in you actually as to why you want to smoke and it's probably inside of me as well?" Because if it's my 11 year old it's definitely in me as well, lack of self-love it will be related to at some point. You release that emotion, and your child will feel quite different anyway.

Even if you release the emotion and your child doesn't feel different, they are allowed to choose to do something that damages them. You wouldn't assist them to do it; I wouldn't go out and buy the cigarettes. I wouldn't help them have the smoke. I would say, "Well obviously you are going to have to earn your money." But if they were already earning money to buy that, why would you restrict them? Aside from restricting them in amongst your own environment, which is your own free will. In other words, "In my house you don't smoke but you are allowed to smoke outside that's not my place."

Participant: Presumably if I work on the issues that I see being reflected back, does it automatically stop that the Law of Attraction with them?

Yes most of the time particularly if we have got young children, but as our children get older obviously it's a little different. But yes our Law of Attraction has a huge effect on why our child would choose to smoke when they are 11 years old.

Participant: I'm not saying that by the way, it was just one the first thing that popped into my mind.

Yeah I know, it's just an example, but it's a very good example. Why would a child choose to do anything at 11 years old? Because there is a Law of Attraction already within them in their soul condition which came from their parents. So there's got to be something that's being triggered in the parents.

So what often happens is a child of fifteen is starting to get involved sexually and the parents are in panic mode. Why are you in panic mode? Because there is an emotion in you about sexuality that this is triggering. That's why you are in panic mode. There is an emotion in you that needs to be dealt with and released and when you deal with it and release it, your child may feel completely different about the whole issue, without you even having to speak a word to them.

So always focus on your own emotion, own your own emotion, that's the key part, always focus on your own emotion. There is no disharmony between the Law of Freedom and the Law of Free Will when you look at it from a purely emotional perspective. You have free will and your free will is just as important as theirs.

So you are walking with your trolley in the supermarket and your thirteen year old says, "Can I get some ice cream?" You don't feel that ice cream is good for them and it's your fridge, your money, so you're allowed to say, "Sorry, no." That's your free will. Now if they have got some money of their own that they have earned or they have got money from other sources, if they go and buy it you can't say no to them now, can you? It's their free will and again look at the underlying emotion. What's going on emotionally? Why do they want to eat that particular thing, whatever that particular thing is if it's damaging to them? Or why do they want to drink that particular substance if it's damaging to them?

You see many of our teenagers by the time they are sixteen or seventeen they are already in an emotional state because of our denial of our own emotions and that's why they want drugs and why they want drink and that's why they want sex. That's why they want all these different things in a way that's damaging to them selves because they are already in the denial of different emotions that we ourselves have been in denial of all of our lives and been unwilling to deal with. So look at the reflection that's coming back.

Participant: So am I feeling self-righteous towards my son because he is still choosing to eat meat, although it makes me feel sick to actually put... Is there still in truth a part of me that's angry that I have to change and that's why he is still...?

There is something inside of you. If you have a younger child or a young teenage child who wants to eat meat in front of you... and in if fact I've seen some do it even more. So their parent becomes a vegetarian and the child eats more meat. So what is going on there? It may not be about the meat issue, it's about a spirit of rebellion. He has the emotion in him of you curtailing his freedom and so therefore will choose often to do the opposite of what you want. Often they are totally driven by just wanting to do the opposite of what you ask and that's because of this emotion of freedom that's in them. And that by the way is in you, because it could never have got in them without it first being in you. So actually you have an emotion where other people are curtailing your freedom and what he's reflecting at you is the emotion you need to work your way through.

So if you can see that none of these Laws of Divine Truth, none of them contradict each other. They may at times seemingly be contradictory when we don't look at them emotionally but when you feel the emotion of them, we will see that there is no contradiction.

18.4. Dealing with demanding and controlling mothers

Participant: With relation to free will, I have a mother who insists on phoning me every night and I have tried to set up with her a moratorium; "Okay call me once a week." I feel very controlled by doing that because I'm saying that but she wants to...

So here's mum, here's you. You are interacting at the soul level, not the intellectual level. You are trying to interact with your mum at the intellectual level, mum is demanding attention of you; there is an emotion in you that causes you to respond to her demands for attention. When you release that emotion, and there is a group of emotions associated with it, she will no longer feel like she needs to impose upon you. It's very rare that she will continue to do it under those conditions because she won't feel that emotion from you anymore. So firstly solve the emotion and resolve the emotion. When you say the words to your mum, "Mum I don't want you to call anymore," she's not hearing that. What she is hearing is your emotion, which is; "mum you are allowed to control me whenever you want." That's the emotion in you. There is a belief in you, an emotion within you, that emotion needs to be released, that's why the Law of Attraction event is occurring.

We interact with our mothers at the soul level, not the intellectual level

When you release that emotion she will no longer feel the need to control you. Now sometimes they may still feel the need because of their own emotions but you will have no trouble actually saying, "Mum if you ring me again I'm going to call the police." You won't feel any feelings of guilt about that, you won't feel any feelings of shame about that, you will feel you have done the right thing by your mum and you will have by the way, because that will trigger her emotion as to why she wants to control you.

What often happens in our interactions with family is that we are driven by guilt and we don't want to face up to that. There are often lots of things that we can do to actually prevent these situations, but firstly focus on the emotion. When you focus on the emotion and release the emotion you will not feel any guilt about ringing up the police and getting your mum never to call again. You won't feel any problem with that.

Participant: Can you possibly point a finger at what it might be that I'm not?

I'll help you do that. Ask yourself the instant you get her call, at the instant you get her call and you pick up the phone and mum is on the other end, you have a feeling, feel that feeling and go underneath that feeling because that's the feeling that's attracting the emotion. That's the feeling that's attracting the event. If you let yourself feel that feeling you will work through the issue very rapidly. If you just call the police and not deal with that feeling she is going to feel very confused because the feeling is still coming from you. So deal with the feeling first.

Participant: As we are having the conversation, it's rage by the way.

Emotions we can feel towards our mothers

Yep, so under the rage is what? There are feelings under the rage, so the rage is the capping emotion. Grief. There is grief. What is the grief about?

Participant: I feel like she just calls me to meet her own needs and she doesn't actually call me to actually see how I am.

Spot on. That's exactly her emotion. How do you feel about that?

Participant: Unloved.

Yes and by the way you are unloved, I must confirm that.

Participant: Unseen, unfelt, invalidated.

You have already identified all the emotions but now what you need to do is feel them. The best way to feel them is let mum call again and say, "Mum I'm going to hang up because I need to feel a lot of things." Straight into the feelings, straight into the feelings of what you attracted, feel those feelings. As you feel those feelings you will actually feel quite strong emotions, which you will as they are all childlike, childhood emotions that you have felt most of your life. And you are dead right; your mum has no interest in you aside from the interest you take in her. And by the way this is the case for many parents.

Now, I'm being very blunt and I'm not judging your mum, this is the emotion in her. She has had that emotion in her from her childhood for very similar reasons to why you have it in you. Allow yourself to feel the grief of those emotions. When you feel the grief of those emotions you will stop attracting the event because on a number of levels you will change. You will no longer feel guilt; you will no longer have an emotion within you that you have got to seek approval to be loved. There will be quite a few other emotions that are released in this interaction and your mum will stop calling you every night. She might call you every second night or third night and then the more truth you speak with her: "Mum you don't actually love me, I feel that you actually call me because you just want me to be interested in your life, I feel mum you need to go and get your own life."

You will actually break the umbilical cord between yourself and your mother in doing that, because you've still got one in place and what that will do, it will be great for her too. Because she is actually living her life through you or attempting to, but if you feel those emotions and you act in harmony with truth, she will deal with those emotions as you work your way through yours. It will be a very powerful interaction for the both of you if you allow it to occur. You notice I said that I've got no trouble saying to my mother you're not calling me anymore and if you call me again I will ring the police? Why would I have no trouble with that?

Participant: Because you have done it.

No, I haven't done it. I went through a space with my mother though. My mum is now starting to watch some of these DVD's so she will probably hear this at some point. I went through a stage with my mum where I picked up the phone and mum started talking and I said, "mum do you want to resolve our previous conversation?" and she would say, "Oh but ... but..." And I would say, "No but mum do you want to resolve what was raised in our previous conversation? What was raised in our previous conversation was that you tried to have me committed, do you want to resolve that, emotionally?" There was usually silence on the other end. "Well no, obviously you don't want to resolve that, so that's fine, that's okay, but I don't want to talk to you because I want to resolve that." And so then I would hang up.

A month later mum would give me a call hoping that I had actually got over it. "Hello, Mum, do you want to resolve our previous conversation?" I'm fair dinkum I did this. "Mum do you want to resolve our... mum?" "Oh well I..." And by this stage she is starting to get like, "Oh but how can we resolve it?" And I said, "Mum you need to feel some emotions about it. You tried to have me committed, what do you think that felt like for me?" Silence on the other end. "Mum we can't have this conversation, we have got to talk about these issues, and I don't want to talk about any other issue, I will be happy to talk about this issue for as long as you want." Silence at the other end. So I hang up.

This went on for nearly nine months and my mum got to the point where she wanted to talk about the issue and she did. She spoke about the issue and when she started speaking about the issue, she started facing the results of her attempt to have me committed. As a result of that she started working her way through some emotions. She started crying on the phone saying she was sorry and she felt sorry for the effect it had had on my sons and I think she even had a conversation with my sons about how sorry she was about doing it. And she started to feel the results of her actions. I felt very comfortable with her talking about any issue with her after that, because she had actually gone through this process of resolution.

Now of course for me to do that in a way that was not angry I had to firstly deal with all of my anger and then my sadness and my grief about having my mother attempt to commit me. Once I went through all of that then I could actually deal with her in a space of love but without compromising. Remember Divine Truth doesn't compromise for the sake of peace either. So there was a matter of just working my way through that emotionally.

18.5. Getting under anger into grief

Participant: I was just wondering if confronting a person you've got an emotional issue with, obviously that will bring up anger and then the moment anger is there, you are already projecting, but you are already projecting anyway?

Exactly!

Participant: But is it worse when it's actually coming out of you and being directed?

If it's being directed at the person, yes it's definitely worse.

Participant: But you don't even have to be saying anything you just feel anger and walk past the person and just feel rage going at that person.

Yep, that's just as bad.

Participant: But my issue is how to jump from that state of anger to feeling the grief or whatever is underneath it?

Anger is another emotion of self-deception. When we are angry we are actually denying a deeper emotion of what we are angry about so the key is, even before you have an interaction with the person, is to actually work through the emotions of why you are angry.

18.6. Example from AJ's life about living in truth with his mother

So if I go back to this situation with my mother, the way I found out that my mother had tried to do this was that nine months prior I told her who I was, I told her that I'm Jesus and so forth and I told her all these different things and, "Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes." Well I don't know how you would have acted as a mother, but most of you would have probably been much the same. "Oh yes, oh yes." She walks away in this state of absolute panic. "He's going to kill himself, he is going to jump off a building I don't know what he is going to do now, what is going on." This was the emotion playing through her mind. So she goes down and has a talk with somebody about it and in the process of talking about it this other person suggests she sees a psychologist about it so she goes to a psychologist. The psychologist says, "Oh he is a very dangerous man, you've got to do something about this. This is a very, very dangerous situation and now I've got to report it." So he reports it and this is all happening unbeknown to me, mum comes back next month as if nothing is happening and the next month after. So she had been visiting me for quite a few months for once a month. Of course during this phase she didn't want anybody else to know she was visiting me either, so she was visiting me privately and even the rest of my family didn't know she was visiting me.

Anyway she is listening to more and asking questions now, "Why do you feel you're Jesus?" And I explain all these different things. I had no idea that all of this was happening behind the scenes. I had a business, which was a property development business, and I had to be insured for all of the money that I had borrowed. So I had personal insurance covering all the money that I had borrowed and if I didn't have that personal insurance they wouldn't give me or loan me more funds to do my development work. So what happened was once a year, every year I had to go and see a doctor and I'd get a physical and a psychological evaluation. Then he writes a report to the insurance company and the insurance company says, "No worries, we're okay with insuring him for a higher value," which allows me to actually borrow more funds.

So I get called to the doctor just as a normal part of my medical and the doctor does the physical, "Looking pretty good". Then he says, "Oh I see you're having psychological problems." And I go, "No, not to my knowledge, I'm not having any psychological problems." "Yeah, yeah," he says, "You are." "Oh, okay then, enlighten me." He said, "Well, you know I have a report here that says that actually you are saying you're Jesus." And I go, "Oh no." He says, "Is that right?" And I say, "Yes, yes that's right, I am saying I am Jesus." "Oh okay" and he is quiet for a while. "You don't see any problem in that?" And I said, "No." He said, "Well..." This actually happened. He is really getting quite annoyed with me too and he is saying, "Well, you know, surely you see a problem with that? You know, you are not Jesus." And I said, "How do you know?" And he said, "Well..." And I said to him, "Look are you saying that I'm crazy because I am saying I am Jesus, is that what you are saying?" And he said, "Yes, pretty much, that's the case." And I said, "Well do you believe in God at all?" He rolls his eyes and goes, "No I don't believe in God," and I said, "Well how many of your patients believe in God? 50%?" We lived in a very religious environment where I was and so probably a good 30 or 40% would have believed in God. So I am saying, ''You've got no patients that believe in God?" He said, "Oh yeah I have lots of patients that believe in God." Okay. And I say, "So are you actually saying that they are crazy too now or what? This is a belief that doesn't agree with your beliefs. My belief just doesn't agree with your belief but you can't prove that I'm wrong. Just like you can't prove that they're wrong. So why are you now saying that I'm crazy, when you are not saying that all these people are crazy? I don't get that."

Now he is starting to get a bit annoyed with me. He couldn't answer that one so of course he skipped over that one and I said, "No, no, let's get back to the subject. You are accusing me of being crazy but you have no evidence whatsoever that I am, none whatsoever." In fact I said to him, "I suggest to you..." by this time I was living by myself and I had a three bedroom house, "come and live with me for a month and you will see whether I'm crazy or not." This is what I suggested. "No I can't do that." I said, "Okay no worries, have you got anybody who might be able to evaluate me who could come and live with me and see if I'm crazy or not?" "No I can't do that."

He would much rather just say I'm crazy because I am saying that I am Jesus and I said, "Well I don't know what we can do about this because I know who I am and you've got no idea who I am. That's understandable because you don't live with me and you don't know what's going on inside of me emotionally or intellectually or my memories or anything like that, you've got no idea. You are just judging it based on what my mother says." I said, "By the way my mother is a Jehovah's Witness, did you know that?" "No" "And do you agree with their teachings? Because they believe that Jesus is returning and all sorts of things, my mum just doesn't want to believe it's me!"

We came to an agreement, he said, "Look I can't say that you are psychologically okay." I said, "Okay, there's nothing I can do about that." It's his free will, isn't it; he's allowed to make that choice. He said, "Now I want you to come back in a year's time and if you have worked through this issue and you feel differently about it, and if you don't work through this issue and you still feel the same then I would like to talk further with you about it. And I said, "Why would I want to do that? I already know who I am. Why would I want to sit here and convince a person who is never going to believe who I am and any of the evidence either? I don't want to do that, so I will just agree that some point in the future you will meet me and you will realize that what I said to you was true. But aside from that I can't do anything unless you want to go further with it."

He decided to not go further with it because in the end I think my logic was too logical for him. He just gave up doing anything further but he refused to sign the document. What that meant was that I could no longer develop, so my job was gone, just like that. And so of course I had a lot of emotion about that. It was my only form of livelihood and at the time I had a number of other emotions about money and self-sufficiency and all these other things, which I have since worked through, but I had to deal with that emotionally. Once I had worked my way through that emotionally, it took about a month, then I raised it with my mother, because by that stage I had released all the emotions of being in a rage with her, being angry with her and then underneath those emotions my mother not even knowing me, doesn't want to know me, wasn't even believing any conversation I was having with her, all the memories that I had talked about with her, she just didn't want to believe any of them. So there were a lot of emotions about that and a lot of emotions about being rejected by my family because I had been rejected much, much earlier by my family and not dealt with some of those emotions, so there were a lot of emotions to work my way through.

Once I had worked my way through those emotions I could talk to my mother with love but not compromise. So that's what I suggest, if you are in a rage, yourself, if you know what you are in a rage about; work through it, deal with the underlying emotions of it, when you feel you have done it, go and talk to the person, because most of the time when you feel you have done it, you are yet to finish it. But if you feel you have done it, go and talk to the person and let whatever else comes up as a residual effect of that come up and deal with that.

Then when you do that what will happen is your Law of Attraction will change anyway, ironically after that time my mum started actually feeling that maybe I might be right and now mum is actually now watching the videos that are being produced about all this stuff. And the last time she actually came to visit me we had very long chats about the Law of Attraction and how the Law of Attraction works. She is still having difficulty understanding how her son knows all these things, when she knows nobody taught me them, so she is having a lot of difficulty with that obviously.

Can you see how even the Law of Attraction will change when you live in truth and don't compromise the truth about all of those events? Now I could have skipped over all of that, I could have said to mum, "Look I have already forgiven you," when I hadn't. I could have skipped over it and said, "Mum I don't want to see you anymore," but that's not really very beneficial either to either of us. It's not really loving to ban someone from your life so I could have gone through lots and lots of different stages but in the end hopefully I would have ended up with the same stage I feel now which is a deep love for my family, the same way as I feel my deep love for you, it's no different my love for them or you. I feel also this deep feeling that everything down the track will work out quite well, but that is after lots of emotions.

18.7. Being truthful about our relationships with our mothers

Participant: So I really appreciate everything that has been said about mothers, particularly the lady down the front. I have a relationship with my mum based on guilt and it's only through that lady's articulation of her relationship with the phone calls that I have just started to see how my relationship with my mum. I could firmly say I deeply adored my mum, I just loved her. But she is now in spirit so that's why I'm sharing this, my mum is now in spirit and I still feel really blocked in how I'm feeling and have really deep feelings of guilt, like I still need to serve her, that I need to hold her memory up to some kind of glory. I'm having trouble with my mediumship skills because I feel like because she won't communicate with me from spirit because she is blocked in anger and I'm also blocked in it as well so I brought it up because my mother is in spirit.

There are a couple of things that I would like to say with you if I could. The issue is going to be with both you and your mum is going to be truth, the issue of truth. At the moment there is a set of truths that you are telling yourself that are not actually true. One of those truths is that you said that you deeply love your mother. It's something that you currently believe but actually it's not true. It's not true because there is also a deep rage towards your mother and the deep rage is about how you weren't protected when you were young and how she knew about the sexual abuse that was occurring with you and didn't protect you. So there are a lot of very, very dark emotions that you also feel towards your mother and the reason why they're not being released is because you want to maintain the internal truth that I actually love my mother. So the key is for you to allow yourself to start digging deeper than that and start seeing actually those different emotions.

For her it's very similar she had a very similar relationship with her own mother and at the moment she is very focused on feeling things towards you, blaming you, rather than actually looking at her own emotions towards her own mother and father and what they needed to deal with. In each case the truth is what is going to expose everything and not compromising about the truth is very important. The truth is that you have some very strong emotions in you of anger towards her and you can't love a person while you are in a rage with them. Allow your self to feel the rage then dig deeper under the rage into these deeper emotions and allow yourself to feel the truth. Some of the feelings of truth are, "mum did not protect me, mum did not care for me, mum cared about herself more than me and so forth," and many of these feelings that you have, Jen, are actually true.

The truth is mum did not care for you more than she cared for herself. She cared for herself far more and did not really care so much about what was happening to you, particularly sexually. The truth is that your mum knew of events that were occurring that were damaging to you and refused to deal with them emotionally. She knew what her husband was like and refused to leave him for lots of different security reasons within herself. She sacrificed you on her alter of lies. I will say that again because it's one thing to be very specific about, she sacrificed you on her alter of lies. Many of us do that as parents in order to stay away from our own emotions and again your mum has just as much ability to progress in Divine Love, as do any of us here. She doesn't need to judge herself for any of these things she does need to feel the emotions of what she has created.

Participant: Does that then mean that pattern has passed on to my children?

Yes it is. Yes particularly your sons definitely feel that pattern, where they feel very responsible for you, and they feel like they love you dearly but actually there is some deep rage and anger within them for the very same reasons, for very similar reasons. When you heal the emotion in you, you will find your children will heal the emotion in them much more rapidly.

What's another one of these one's? A fearless existence, yeah!

19. Divine Truth results in a fearless existence

Divine Truth results in a fearless existence. Every single time you become afraid, you are no longer in a state of love and ironically you are also no longer in a state of truth. The reason why is that fear is 'false expectations appearing real' to you. So every time you are in a state of fear it's because you expect something that's actually in error from God's perspective. Now it may be not in error from the perspective of man. So for example you decide to not pay your taxes. From a man's perspective that's going to be perhaps in error, but it's only an error from God's perspective if you lie about it. Can you see the difference between the two? Or if you expect the government to provide you with things, that you're not now paying taxes for; in other words I expect my government to go and grade my road but I'm not going to pay taxes for that. Then obviously, now I have unjust expectations, which are also in error. Mind you the government could grade your road without charging for taxes at all. They have other means of raising revenue which is including the printing of funds but because of the world's economic system they don't do that anymore, so that's one reason why you pay tax.

So there are all these things involved with the paying of taxes but in the end if you were living in a fearless existence you wouldn't be afraid of authority would you? So therefore you wouldn't be afraid of what they could do to you. Would you then be afraid of losing your house? No. You wouldn't be afraid of losing your car, you wouldn't be afraid of being put in gaol, you wouldn't be afraid of anything, can you see that? If I'm afraid of any of those things I still have an emotional injury to work through, and I am afraid of some of those things myself still. So I have some emotional injuries to work through about fear as well, that's why I'm going through what I'm going through this week.

When we get to a point of at-onement with God we will be fearless. When we actually long for Divine Truth with all of our heart, we will actually be also fearless and it won't matter to us what goes on around us. We won't be afraid of the outcome. That's a lot of freedom, isn't it? But it also means dealing with a lot of released emotions because most of us have some emotions about fear inside of us.

This is one thing I wanted to raise with regard to this property thing that people have been... By the way there have been a few emails coming back for Peter saying, "Now we know what AJ is really up to. He is going to become a cult leader now." Obviously they weren't at the meeting last week, were they? That statement is a statement of fear, can you see that? Whether I'm a cult leader or not it's still a statement of fear. So why would you want to have that fear in you?

Most people have a lot of fear in them and make lots of decisions, even down to not understanding what fear causes us to do. Many of you plan with detail in your life, don't you? So you have a feeling to do something, and then what do you do? You get all the facts together, then you pour over the facts, pour over the facts, pour over the facts, and then you weigh up all the options positive and negative. What is happening to your feeling by the way by this stage? It's way, way out there isn't it, it's hardly even being noticed anymore and you are in this state of actually analysing facts and details. We are in a state of fear, in that state.

Whenever you want to control the future, whenever you want to know what the future is going to be, whenever you want... you are in a state of fear. The key is to just accept that. I'm in a state of fear, what is my fear about? At its root cause fear comes from a lack of reliance on God; that's its root cause. Can everyone sees why that would be the case? If I completely relied with all my heart on God would I ever be afraid again? No. So obviously there is an emotion I need to work through, when I work through that emotion I will be in a fearless state.

Let's say we are all about to buy a property together, even me wanting to know how much you can donate is a fear. Can you see that? Why would I want to know that? We either get enough money, or we don't get enough money. If we get enough money from the desire of everyone together, then we will buy the property, if we don't then we won't. Why would I be afraid either way? Can you see that it's all driven by fear, "I want to know when somebody wants to be paid back." Why would I want to know that? Because I think I might not have the money when they want to be paid back, for them to be paid back. What am I afraid of? I'm afraid that my Law of Attraction won't bring me the funds that are necessary to do what needs to be done. I need to deal with that fear.

On the Divine Love Path can you see how everything is focused on your Law of Attraction? So everything is then focused on you allowing it to trigger the emotion in you and deal with that emotion. Every time you plan for the future, you're planning to work around your Law of Attraction. Can you see how every time I plan for an event in the future, really what I'm doing is trying to work out what might happen in the future and I will then have a plan to work around that? But if that event would happen in the future then that was my Law of Attraction to bring an emotion to the surface within me. That's God's messenger of truth to me, why would I want to work around it? Why would I want to work around that?

I was a meticulous planner, every single night I would write down everything I was going to do the next day and on many occasions I would also write down everything that could go wrong the next day and how I was going to fix every one of those things. Now of course a lot of those things never even happened, but I still did this and in the end it's because of all these emotions of not wanting to understand the truth in the end; that God has me in Her care. Everything that happens to me is something to release an emotion that will help me grow and grow. Can everyone see that?

Participant: I just thought you'd still have to book flights ahead and plan those sorts of things, don't you?

No when you get your Law of Attraction working perfectly, everything will come to you just when you need it, you won't need to book things ahead, none of that.

Participant: But the cheaper flights are booked earlier.

19.1. Example of fears of lack of abundance

Ah but now you see you are triggering an emotion, you see. The emotion is, "But the money is involved," so there is this emotion around money when I worry about that. Why would I worry about that if I have unlimited funds and I believe I'm super abundant, why would I ever be concerned about making the monetary decision? How many of you get the early flight because it's cheaper? You've got a problem with money. You have a problem with how much you're worth. Because if you were worth more, you wouldn't do that!

How many of you get a different vegetable, fruit or produce because it's on sale? You've got a problem with money. If it's not really what you wanted you've got a problem with money. Can you see these are all just things triggering these emotions constantly happening around us and if I was in this state where I was abundant would I worry about those things? If I loved myself would I worry about those things? No I would not worry about those things at all! And ironically my Law of Attraction would be so strong that whatever I desired would automatically happen for me anyway. That's where all of you are headed, to that place. Where you don't have to worry about anything! Isn't that great? Just imagine being in that place. It's awesome.

You will find as you work through these issues of truth rapidly you will get to that place a lot quicker, you will be absolutely surprised by your Law of Attraction, really surprised. You will want something and all of a sudden somebody will give it to you or something will happen and exactly what you wanted comes to you. You will get gifts given to you, all sorts of things. Many of you don't believe that can happen at the moment and that's why it's not happening because there are emotions in you of, "That can't happen to me," you know, "I'm not worth that." There are all of these emotions that we have to work through first but once we do, we will be in a totally different state.

20. Closing Words

Now it's half-past-five actually. Interesting discussion though, truth, isn't it? What I suggest you do with the stuff we haven't covered is to go through it yourself and allow yourself to meditate about these principles of truth and how when they are in you emotionally, how they will change your life. The reason why I suggest you do that's because many of us still have a hate of truth, here in the emotions. We are so worried and afraid of truth in ourselves emotionally and part of the thing that can help us get out of that state and into the state of joy of truth is by actually reflecting on what the joy will be living in these places.

Many of us have this terrible fear of what our life will be in that place and we're not yet fully emotionally grasping how powerful and joyous our life will be in that space. Allow yourselves to meditate and feel about how powerfully joyful your life is going to be once you are in this space of love and truth and allow yourself to start breaking down the barriers that you have inside of yourself as to why you're rejecting truth in your life. Because when you reject the truth in your life you are also rejecting your emotions, you're rejecting your true self and you're rejecting God while you are doing that. So my suggestion is to do the opposite to that. Start allowing the truth to really influence your life. Right across the board! Allow the emotions to flow up and allow your self to feel them.

Alright well thank you very much for today guys.

Appendix: Relationship With God: Longing (Praying) For Divine Truth Seminar Outline

### Reminders About Prayer

Prayer is:

A passionate desire & longing coming from the depth of our emotions (from the soul) directed towards God

True prayer modifies the soul, and breaks down the soul's barriers, restrictions and blockages to reception

True prayer always activates God's soul into an emotional response

God feels our emotions the instant we have feelings & emotions directed towards God

If those emotions & feelings are harmonious with Love, God's Soul instantly responds emotionally

God "hears" our intentions (the desires/feelings that we are going to have in the future)

God "hears" our emotions (the desires/feelings that we currently have right now)

When God responds emotionally, God also instantly acts

So God "hears" our prayer by having an emotional response to our prayer, and instantly acting upon it

Major Essential Element Of Prayer:

Personal Truthfulness, Honesty, Sincerity & Purity

Bringing our own "Personal" Truth into harmony with Divine Truth, so that Divine Love can flow

### Reminders About Personal Truth

Personal "Truth" is what we personally emotionally accept as the "truth"

Personal "Truth" can become Absolute Truth if we grow towards God

Personal "Truth" is often very limiting, and often binds or entraps us

Personal "Truth" is often error from God's perspective, and is based upon fear

Personal "Truth" is emotional, and is painful to release if it is in error, pleasurable if truthful

### Reminders About Divine Truth

Absolute Truth is the Truth that only God has, the Divine Truth

Divine Truth or Absolute Truth has Qualities or Attributes

Anything presented as "truth" can be compared to these attributes to determine whether they are God's Truth

Qualities Of Divine Truth

Divine Truth is infinite

Divine Truth is of itself, a thing apart, and admits of no variations or modifications

Divine Truth and love are always in perfect harmony, and without Truth, Love cannot be complete

Divine Truth does not and cannot compromise, even for the sake of peace

Divine Truth itself, with all the power and knowledge that it has as its foundation, will not compel a man to accept it against his will

Divine Truth will never accommodate itself to the beliefs of men

Divine Truth results in freedom

Divine Truth results in a fearless existence

Divine Truth does not hurt anyone or anything

Divine Truth does not allow the lie, no matter what the price

The individual's knowledge of Divine Truth is eternally progressive

Breaking the law of Divine Truth results in penalties

Divine Truth is demonstrated by actions

Divine Truth is felt, it is emotional

Personal "truth" must be faced before Divine Truth can be found

Personal "truth" must be eternally progressive

### Praying For Divine Truth

"The Truth (Divine Truth) will set you free"

Divine Truth is the doorway to receiving Divine Love

Having a passionate desire for God's Truth to enter us is an essential part in our becoming at-one with God

Prayer for Divine Truth involves us opening our heart to EVERY falsehood that exists within ourselves

We will not be able to connect to God if we avoid self-examination or avoid the Absolute Truth in our life

Prayer for Divine Truth involves our having a passionate desire to see ourselves as God sees us

### Prayer For Divine Truth

I am praying for Divine Truth when:

I have an emotional understanding that I will always be progressing towards Divine Truth

ie. I do not resist new emotional experiences, or my Law of Attraction triggering error

I emotionally accept that Divine Truth is fixed and unchangeable

ie. I am not always trying to "negotiate" with God about Her Truth

I emotionally see the harmonious connection between Divine Truth & receiving Divine Love

ie. I do not expect to receive Divine Love, when I am avoiding the truth in my life

I refuse to compromise Divine Truth in my day to day life, even for the sake of peace or expedience

ie. Even if I seem destined "lose" something, I never compromise the Truth

I refuse to force other people, or manipulate other people into doing what I want them to do

ie. I respect the gift of free will in all people, even when they choose to use that free will sinfully

I refuse to bow to the beliefs of men, even if threatened with death, rather than live in Divine Truth

ie. I do not compromise my beliefs, even if it means I lose my friends or family members

I live a completely free existence; free from others opinions and desires

ie. I do not allow other peoples opinions or desires influence me away from living in Love

I live a complete fearless existence, in harmony with Divine Truth

ie. I do not allow fear to dictate to me how I live my life (even planning/control is fear based)

I do not intentionally or unintentionally hurt others by compromising Divine Truth in my life

ie. I understand that when I compromise Divine Truth, I harm others as well as myself

I never lie, no matter what the price

ie. I understand that lying or withholding the truth has a much higher "price"

I fully understand emotionally that every time I break the law of Divine Truth my soul experiences pain

ie. The pain in my life is the direct result of not living in Divine Truth or Divine Love

I demonstrate the principles of Divine Truth by acting in harmony with Divine Love

ie. Even when I am judged by others negatively, I still speak the Truth & live in Love

I do not have to "try" to live in Divine Truth, but rather I feel Divine Truth as emotions within my soul

ie. I understand that if I am "trying", it is because I am yet to actually make the soul change needed

I have a strong personal desire to see myself as God sees me, rather than deny or ignore my emotions

ie. I do not resist what God is showing me through my Law of Attraction, rather I embrace it

I am NOT praying for Divine Truth when:

When I believe that there is no more for me to learn from an emotional perspective

When I modify, compromise, or "soften" the truth for any reason even when faced with death or pain

When I am not acting in harmony with the Divine Truth or Divine Love that I have already received

When I allow my emotions to be compromised for the sake of peace

When I force myself or others to accept Divine Truth without it being an emotional process of Free Will

When I try to modify the Divine Truth when presenting it to others to make it more acceptable

When I feel trapped or enslaved by any vice, addiction, opinion or circumstance

When I feel afraid, or I am making decisions based upon fear

When I use anger, resentment, hatred, or even irritation to harm others

When I am afraid to tell the truth in all circumstances or situations, and when I withhold the truth

When I try to slow down or stop my own progression because of the emotional pain I am in

When I believe I can "get away with it" when I withhold truth or believe the error due to convenience

When I know the truth about a situation, but refuse to act upon it for any reason

When I think I know the truth, but I have to "try" to practice it, it is yet to really enter my heart

When I feel I can avoid emotional truth (from God's perspective) about myself, my desires or passions

### When I Am Praying For Divine Truth Constantly

I will feel the Divine Truth emotionally the instant the Divine Truth enters me

I will allow myself to grieve emotionally the instant I feel an error (sin; disharmony with truth) leave me

I will constantly state the truth of what is inside of me to God, no matter what that "truth" is & how dark it looks

I will build on the Divine Truth I have already learned, and use it as a solid foundation for progression

### References, Music and Movies

Reference: Divine Love "Qualities Of Divine Truth" AJ Miller

Reference: Divine Love "Through the Mists", "The Life Elysian", "The Gate of Heaven". Robert James Lees

Reference: Divine Love "The True Gospel" Padgett Messages. All Volumes.

