>> HELLO, GOOD EVENING.
I'M LAURA INGRAHAM.
AND JUST TO QUICKLY RESPOND TO
ALL OF MY FAN MAIL, NO, YOU'RE
AN A-HOLE.
TONIGHT, WE'RE LIVE FROM THE
ARIZONA BORDER WHERE A VICIOUS
CARAVAN OF DOZENS, MAYBE
MILLIONS OF ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS,
IS HEADED STRAIGHT FOR YOU AND
YOUR GRANDCHILDREN.
AND THAT'S NOT FEARMONGERING.
THAT IS JUST --
BUT TRUE.
THANKFULLY, WE HAVE A PRESIDENT
WHO ACTUALLY PROTECTS AMERICA.
PRESIDENT TRUMP, SEEN HERE IN A
NEW OFFICIAL PORTRAIT, HAS SENT
THOUSANDS OF TROOPS TO THE
BORDER TO STOP THIS CARAVAN.
OF COURSE, THE LIBERAL MEDIA IS
TRYING TO LABEL PRESIDENT TRUMP
A RACIST, BUT EXPECT FOR HIS
WORDS AND ACTIONS THROUGHOUT HIS
LIFE, HOW IS HE RACIST?
ALL OF A SUDDEN, THE TERM
"NATIONALIST" IS BAD.
THE WORD "WHITE" IS BAD.
THE PHRASE "WHITE NATIONALIST"
IS BAD.
[ LAUGHTER ]
WHEN I HEAR "WHITE NATIONALIST,"
I JUST THINK OF A FUN FOURTH OF
JULY BARBECUE, THE KIND YOU
DON'T HAVE TO CALL THE COPS ON.
NOW LET'S FIND OUT WHAT'S REALLY
HAPPENING WITH THIS CARAVAN.
JOINING ME IS THE HOST OF HER
OWN SHOW HERE ON FOX NEWS, JUDGE
JEANINE PIRRO.
>> IT'S AN ABSOLUTE DISGRACE!
>> WHAT IS?
>> JUST WHATEVER YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT.
>> RIGHT.
WELL, JUDGE -- JUDGE PIRRO, WHAT
HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE
CARAVAN?
>> I HAVEN'T JUST HEARD ABOUT
IT, I'VE SEEN IT WITH MY OWN
EYES.
TAKE A LOOK AT THIS FOOTAGE OF
THE CARAVAN FROM EARLIER TODAY.
>> MY GOD.
AND THAT'S REAL FOOTAGE OF THE
CARAVAN?
>> IT HAS TO BE REAL.
I FOUND IT ON TRUTHEAGLE.GUN.
>> AND WHO IS IN THE CARAVAN?
>> EVERYONE YOU'VE EVER SEEN IN
YOUR NIGHTMARES, LAURA.
IT'S GOT GUATEMALANS, MEXICANS,
ISIS, THE MENENDEZ BROTHERS, THE
1990 DETROIT PISTONS, THANOS AND
SEVERAL BABADOOKS.
>> AND PRESIDENT TRUMP HAS SAID
THERE ARE MIDDLE EASTERN PEOPLE
AS WELL?
>> NO QUESTION, LAURA.
THIS CARAVAN'S GOT HELLA
ALADDIN.
THEY TOOK THE VERY COMMON DIRECT
FLIGHT FROM IRAN TO GUATEMALA
THAT CLAIMS THEIR ELEPHANTS AS
SERVICE ANIMALS AND THEN RODE
THEM STRAIGHT INTO MEXICO.
IT MAKES ALMOST TOO MUCH SENSE.
>> AND WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN
THEY GET HERE?
>> OH, WE'RE IN TROUBLE, LAURA.
JUST LOOK AT THIS FOOTAGE OF THE
CARAVAN CROSSING INTO MEXICO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WOW, THAT'S TRULY HORRIFYING.
WAS THAT BRAD PITT?
>> YES, THAT'S RIGHT.
WE BELIEVE HE'S ACTUALLY DATING
THE CARAVAN WHICH PEOPLE HAVE
LABELED BRAD-A-VAN.
>> THAT'S TOP NOTCH REPORTING,
JEANINE.
>> OH, I KNOW.
>> NOW I'D LIKE TO TAKE A MOMENT
TO THANK MY SPONSORS, ALL THE
WONDERFUL COMPANIES THAT STUCK
WITH ME AFTER I ATTACKED THE
SURVIVORS OF THE PARKLAND
SHOOTING.
SO BIG THANKS TO WARM ICE CREAM.
IS REGULAR ICE CREAM TOO COLD
FOR YOUR SENSITIVE TEETH?
LET US WARM IT UP FIRST.
AND FROM THE MAKERS OF MYPILLOW,
MY HEMORRHOID DOUGHNUT.
EVERYONE'S HEMORRHOIDS ARE
UNIQUE.
SHOULDN'T YOUR DOUGHNUT BE TOO?
OF COURSE, WHITE CASTLE.
A CASTLE FOR WHITES?
YES, PLEASE.
AND DON'T MISS MY COLLEAGUE
BRIAN KILMEADE'S NEW BOOK,
"ANDREW JACKSON AND THE BATTLE
FOR HILLARY'S E-MAILS."
THAT'S AN INSPIRING STORY.
NOW, AS WE SAID, THOUSANDS OF
TROOPS ARE HEADED TO THE BORDER.
THE GOAL IS TO HAVE FIVE ARMED
SOLDIERS FOR EVERY ONE SHOELESS
IMMIGRANT CHILD.
TRUMP IS CALLING IT OPERATION
EAGLE WITH A HUGE DONG.
EAGLE WITH A DONG.
HERE WITH AN INSIDER'S LOOK IS
FORMER MILWAUKEE SHERIFF AND
TRUMP CHEERLEADER DAVID CLARKE.
SHERIFF, HOW ARE YOU?
>> I'M POPULAR AMONG MY OWN
PEOPLE.
>> WELL, THE SITUATION IS
URGENT, LAURA.
THE CARAVAN IS ONLY 800 MILES
FROM OUR BORDER.
IF THESE IMMIGRANTS WALK AT
NORMAL PACE OF 300 MILES A DAY,
THEY COULD BE HERE IN TIME TO
VOTE ON ELECTION DAY.
>> AND ARE THEY MOVING THAT
QUICKLY?
>> JUST TAKE A LOOK AT THIS
AERIAL FOOTAGE OF THE CARAVAN.
>> MY GOD, AND THOSE ARE HUMANS?
>> BASICALLY, YEAH.
WE'VE ALSO LEARNED THAT ALL OF
THE
WOMEN IN THE CARAVAN ARE MORE
THAN NINE MONTHS PREGNANT.
AND THEY HOLDING THE BABIES IN
UNTIL THE EXACT MOMENT WHEN THEY
CROSS THE BORDER.
AND THEN THEY LITERALLY ARE
LITERALLY GOING TO DROP ANCHOR.
AND THE BABIES, GET THIS, ARE
PREGNANT.
>> AND SHERIFF, I HAVE TO PRESS
YOU ON THIS.
WHAT ARE YOUR SOURCES?
>> THE CROWS FROM "DUMBO."
>> THANK YOU, SHERIFF CLARKE.
NOW LEADING UP TO THE MIDTERMS,
THERE'S A LOT OF AWFUL VOTER
SUPPRESSION GOING ON.
THAT'S WHY I'M PROUD TO PRESENT
A NEW SEGMENT CALLED "FOX NEWS
TIPS FOR BLACK AND HISPANIC
VOTERS."
WE WANT TO MAKE SURE YOUR VOICES
ARE HEARD.
TIP ONE, NEVER VOTE ON TUESDAYS.
THE CROWDS ARE THE ABSOLUTE
WORST ON TUESDAYS.
TIP NUMBER TWO, PALETTES CAN BE
CONFUSING.
IF YOU SEE R NEXT TO A NAME,
THAT COULD MEAN REPUBLICAN.
TIP TWO, BALLOTS CAN BE
CONFUSING.
TIP THREE, IF YOU'RE HISPANIC,
YOU CAN CALL IN YOUR VOTE.
IF YOU THINK YOU VOTED, GET
MEMTIVE JESUS COMMEMORATE
PLATES.
SEE JESUS AS HE REALLY WAS, AS
AN AMERICAN.
LET'S TAKE A BREAK.
WHEN WE COME BACK, AN UPDATE
FROM DISGRACED FORMER ACTOR ALEC
BALDWIN, SEE HERE MOLESTING A
YOUNG BOY SCOUT.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
SATURDAY NIGHT!
