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JAX

Breaking the Declan Brothers

Published by Kelly Gendron

Copyright © 2015 Kelly Gendron

All rights reserved

Edited by: J. Sims

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each reader. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

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I slip a trembling hand inside her shirt, move it up her soft belly, and reach her lacy bra. A moan escapes her lips, and I deepen the kiss. Pulling the lace out of my way, my knuckles scrape across a small bead. My heart beats recklessly beneath my own shirt. I find her nipple again, that perfect little tight bead, and squeeze it between my fingers. She whimpers against my mouth. I pinch harder. Fuck. I want to grip hold of it with my teeth.

Too anxious, I slide my hand down into her pants. The tight elastic waistband presses on my forearm, forbidding my entrance, but I'm gettin' in there. I feel her wetness on the tips of my fingers. My heart beats faster. My finger follows all that wetness and fuck, it slips right into her softness. Damn, it's so tight in there, so amazingly snug and warm. Man. I gotta get into that sweet, tight place. I pull out and thrust back in. Her hips move with my probing finger. A groan reels from me. Not breaking from the kiss, I pull my hand out, grab her pants, and start to yank them down.

"No," she breathes over my mouth.

The blood in my veins pumps hard, pulsating and thrashing beneath my heated flesh. I neglect the sounds she's making and strip her panties off. Her ripe pussy glistens beneath all that wetness. Fuck, it's making my dick hurt so bad.

"No." She pushes me.

Breaths rapid and shallow, I struggle to undo my pants.

"Stop." She hits me in the chest.

I pull my dick free from my jeans. I've waited and waited. She's made me wait. She said tonight. I could have her tonight. Blinded by the uncontrollable need to have her, I crawl over her fraught body. Afraid I'm going to blow my load before my dick can make it inside. I grab it. She slaps me, striking me across the face. My dick gets harder. I guide myself to her opening.

"No! Stop!" she screams. Loud!

That's when I snap out of it and look up.

That's when I see it so alive in her eyes.

It rushes all through me.

I can taste, smell, and feel...her fear.

####

####  CHAPTER ONE

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"So ladies," I walk over with the wine glasses, "what should we do this summer?"

Rayna takes her glass from me and lifts it. "I say we eat and drink as much as we want. We'll make it our goal to gain no less than ten pounds this summer."

"No way." Lurlene shakes a full head of dark copper hair as she captures the glass from my hand. "I just lost twenty pounds. It took me six months. Now, when I wear my skinny jeans, it doesn't look like someone forgot to stop pouring me into them. I had to eat a salad, and I mean just lettuce, so I could afford the calories I plan to consume with you ladies tonight. Sorry," she scrunches her freckled nose, "you're going to have to come up with something else."

"Yeah. Bad idea, Rayna." I retrieve my glass of wine from the counter and enter the living room. "I know you're exiting a long-term relationship and all. You might want to kick your heels up for a couple months," I slumber into the sofa next to Lurlene and peer down at Rayna sitting on the floor, "but I'm looking to get laid his summer."

"You're always lookin' to get laid." Rayna takes a sip of her wine. "And ten pounds wouldn't put a dent in that body of yours."

"It's my metabolism." I flip a hand in the air. "It kicks ass."

"Yeah, she gets her perfect figure from her mother and me," Lurlene smirks. "People think I work at the damn gym. If anyone needs to get laid, it's me."

My eyes flash to Lurlene. "I thought you were saving yourself for _the one_?"

"Heck, I'm twenty-five, and there's not a single prospect within miles. I'm never going to find love." Lurlene shrugs. "I'm reconsidering."

Rayna props up on her knees, and her dark long strands swing forward. "Hey, I've got an idea."

Oh, here we go. We're definitely in trouble whenever Rayna gets that look in those sly-green eyes.

"You know my sister still has her place in the Bayou? Well, she hasn't used it in a few years, busy with the fam, kids, and shit. We could go there for the summer. I'm between jobs, Emmie, you can do your job from anywhere, and Lurlene, you lucky bitch, you don't have to be anywhere until the kiddos go back to school in the fall. What do you think?"

"I don't know. I haven't been back to the Bayou in years," I say.

"It's been six for me. But we could meet up with friends, hang out at all the old stomping grounds, build fires, and get drunk all summer long."

"Yeah, and we could also run into the Declan brothers," I say with a tight smile.

"The Declan brothers?" Lurlene glances back and forth between Rayna and me. She's not from the Bayou.

"Jax, Zeke, and," I lean toward Rayna, "Slate."

"I'm so over him," she waves a hand at me and takes a sip of her wine. "What?" She sets the glass down. "Like I said, it's been six years."

"What's up with Slate," Lurlene asks.

"Rayna dated him all through high school. There was even talk of marriage."

"It was first love shit. And I got no problem seeing Slate Declan again. What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Jax Declan?"

"I never did anything with Jax Declan!"

"But you wanted to," Rayna smirks.

"Never," I outright lie.

"What about Zeke," Rayna glances over at Lurlene, "he's the player of plays. And he's so fucking hot. Too bad the asshole knows it."

"And that's why I never touched him, either," I say, now speaking from truth. "Way too many hands grabbing on that pole."

"I hear he has an exceptional pole. But then again, so did Slate. I can only assume Jax does, too." She drops back down onto the floor. "Do you think Jax is gay?"

"Oh my God, I never consider it, but ya know," I grimace, "he might be. I've never seen him with a girl, much less heard of him dating anyone." And God knows I tried to get that guy to notice me, but he ignored all my advances. "Who knows, if we did go back there we could find the Declan brothers all married with a new herd of little Declans saddling up to wreak havoc in the Bayou."

"I say we check it out. Let's do it, let's wreak a little havoc of our own." Rayna grins.

"I'd love to have another go at it with Jax." I bite my lip, again the truth. "Ya know, to see if I could break him, find out if he's into the same sex or not."

"Uh-huh." Rayna's grin widens. "And I, just by being there, could break Slate's heart like he kinda did mine. And you," Rayna looks at Lurlene. "You could get that cherry of yours popped by the best damn lay in the Bayou, and you could break every one of Zeke Declan's rules, too."

"Rules?" Lurlene's brows draw together.

"Yeah," Rayna lifts a finger. "Rule number one; don't call him, he'll call you," she raises another finger, "two; he doesn't date, three; no sleepovers, and rule number four," Rayna looks at me wiggling four long digits, "absolutely no virgins."

"And," I turn to Lurlene, "if you don't agree, understand, and follow those rules, he refuses to sleep with you," I say, holding back my laughter from the appalled look on Lurlene's face.

"You're just his type, and you have experience with refusing men so you could give Zeke Declan a real good run for his booty call." Rayna's eyebrows wiggle.

"His type," Lurlene says.

"Remember, Emmie, what was her name?" Rayna snaps her fingers. "Shit. Luna Featherhouse. That's it. Oh, Zeke fell head over heels for her, but she wouldn't give his cocky ass the time of day. Drove him insane. With our help, Lurlene could do it. She could get laid, and break Zeke, along with every one of his damn rules."

"Wait," Lurlene says, shaking her hands. "He really has rules, and girls agree to them just so they can have sex with this guy?" Rayna and I nod our heads. "And neither of you—"

"Eww!" Rayna's body shakes with the heebie-jeebies. "God, no! I dated his brother, and Emmie, although she's trying to deny it, only ever had eyes for Jax. So, what do you say?"

I roll my only-eyes-for-Jax-Declan at Rayna. "You're absolutely crazy. Besides, there's a good chance we'd get there and the Declan brothers are indeed all married."

"But if they're not, that could be our goal this summer." Rayna picks up her wine glass in cheer. "To breaking the Declan brothers."

####

####  CHAPTER TWO

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As usual, Rayna got her way. And, elected to pick up the veggies for our first dinner back in the Bayou, I stroll through the farmer's market. Not much has changed. Same stands with the same faces behind them, both just a little older now.

I smile at a few people who I recognize, wondering if they remember me. I wasn't born in Bayou Vista, like Rayna. My mother dragged me here when I was ten after she found out that the Universal Royalty Beauty Pageant was held in Texas. No matter what she had to do, my mother was going to enter me. Since the day I could walk, I was primped and propped for the epic event. As a kid, I didn't know what it was like not to wear **** make-up, dresses, and, hell, I can still run a 5k in a pair of heels. Yep. I'm Barbie, but with a brain.

I'm also _that_ girl. Ya know, the one the guys in high school wanted to fuck and the one the girls loved to hate. Can't say I wanted this face or this body, but I own it. I'm not sayin' it's all bad because looking the way I do has its benefits. Still, people seldom take me seriously.

Drawn to the stand with the plums, I pick one up and smell it, but the dark skin traps in all the sweetness. I pay for a few, toss them in my bag, and keep one in my hand. I bite into it, look up, and arrive at the darkest eyes this great earth has been blessed with. Acquainted with those eyes, my body reacts on impulse, flushing with that old familiar heat ensured by the palm-biting Jax Declan. Below those sinfully dark eyes sit a small but sexy lopsided grin, and a little lower, a wide broad chest stretches the hell out of a light gray tee. With the collar of the shirt stretched, I catch a glimpse of where his shoulder and neck meet, those muscles running together a delicious sight. Even his scapula looks lickable.

And, hot damn! When did he fill out? I'm not talking about filling out from too many beers and midnight snacks, either. He's stacked. His biceps bulge from the sleeves of that perfectly fitting t-shirt, veins straining beneath his tanned forearms as he carries a crate full of fruit. I want to try him on. Wear him. Wrap his entire body around mine.

It takes a second or two for my brain to finally comprehend that all that hot testosterone of a perfect male species is heading straight for me.

He drops the crate on the table and arches a brow. There's no mistaking it. _He_ recognizes me.

"You better get that." He nudges a stubble-darkened chin at me.

"What," I ask, shifting my hip, and making every stride to hide my response to his ultra-male-hotness. God, how I've missed those eyes, and don't even get me started on that mouth.

"I'm not sure," his eyes squint down at me, "it might be from that plum in your hand, but then again, it could also be mistaken for drool. Either way, I don't think whatever you got drippin' down there from your chin is beauty queen decorum."

Shit! I swipe a hand across my chin in the most unladylike way.

Yeah, my mother succeeded. She got me in that damn beauty pageant. I came runner-up. Obviously, still to this day, Jax Declan won't let me live it down. I never wanted to be a beauty queen. That's why I got out of here, went to college, and started a new life somewhere no one knew me.

"Oh, Jax!" Mrs. Owens, hair a little greyer and thinner, comes walking over in a flannel shirt and jeans. "Thanks for getting that stuff out of the truck for me." She reaches up and pats him on a nicely rounded shoulder.

Either Mrs. Owens shrunk or Jax grew a few inches. I don't recall him being so tall. Then again, I usually had heels on when I was this close to him. Today I'm sporting flip-flops. I glance at his hands. Dammit. He has work gloves on so I can't tell if he's wearing a wedding band.

"It's my pleasure." He claps his gloved hands together, winking down at the elderly lady.

She waves a finger at him. "Now, you be sure to take a pie for you and your boys." She turns to me with a quick smile before attending to a customer.

Your boys? Is she talking about his kids? This needs some investigating. "Well, you haven't changed a bit have you, Jax Declan. Still lending a helping hand to the damsels in distress." I take a bite of my plum and follow it up with another swipe of my fingers across my chin.

He sets his gloved hands on his hips. My eyes follow them to his trim waist, and the way his jeans gather at the crotch. Christ! Perhaps all the Declan boys really do have an exceptional rod. He's packing something colossal in that denim.

"What?" he drawls with that sexy southern tongue. "Rather I pamper every princess in a dress?"

"If you did," I look up from his crotch, fully aware that he saw me checking out his divine package, and smile, "you'd certainly get something other than sweet, little old ladies' homemade pies."

"Yeah, but my boys, they sure do love Mrs. Owen's pie."

"Always the pleaser." I grin. Someone's had to have snagged him up by now. Right? There's no way he's not married. Especially in the Bayou, where the population is a whopping 1500. The pickins are real slim.

"Hey, what can I say," his eyes drift to my mouth, "I do like pie, too."

Was that a sexual innuendo, payback for the eye wander to his crotch? I chew on the sweetness in my mouth. Nay, Jax doesn't make passes at girls. He's the polite Declan brother. Strolls on the straight and narrow and never gets in trouble. His job is keeping the other two brothers in check.

Well, nevertheless, here goes nothin'. "And like any good pie," I take another nibble of my fruit and drag a finger across my bottom lip to catch the juices there, "it must be eaten."

"Oh, don't you worry, Emmie Rue." His dark eyes lift to mine. "I am an exceptional pie eater."

"Is that from experience, Jax? Have you been eatin' a lot of pie lately? Been participating in the festival pie eating contests or something?" I try to stay moderate in case I'm reading too much into this whole pie thing.

"As a matter of fact, I got the blue ribbon," his eyelids lower, along with his voice, "hangin' over my headboard."

Oh. My. God! I think he _is_ flirting with me, and I think my pussy just cried a little. Yeah, it did, just a tiny bit. I need to get him to take those gloves off right now! I need to know if he's taken.

"I'm not sure that's the best place to display it. Who'll see it?" Your wife? Girlfriend? Kids?

"Shit, Emmie Rue. I'm not lookin' to brag about my talent. It's not like I have to wear a crown so that everyone knows I'm an exceptional," his upper lip twitches, "pie eater."

For cryin' out loud! I was thirteen, and my mother made me wear that damn tiara for an entire week after I won runner-up! Obviously, something else Jax Declan's not gonna let me live down.

"Well, you should. Talents __ like that aren't something you should hide," I say. I want to fuck him, drag his sexy ass to some dark corner and do him right now. Oww...I'm gonna have fun breaking this Declan brother. That's if he's not taken, or, oh God, gay. By the way he's speaking to me right now, I'm starting to think he's into girls.

"Yeah, maybe you're right." He hitches a gloved thumb into his front jean pocket. And, dammit, my eyes want to follow the action. But I'm not going to look down at his crotch. I'm not! "Not everyone knows about my talents." He hefts one of those nicely rounded shoulders. "Just a very selective few."

"And now me," I say with a smile.

"Yeah, by hearsay." He chuckles, low and husky. God, just that little sound tickles my pussy. "Hey, how long you plannin' to be in town? Perhaps you can see me in action." He takes the glove off his right hand, reaches into the crate, and picks up an apple. "Ya know, the Vista Festival is coming up in a few weeks."

"And you'll be eating pie there?" Please, please take off your other glove. I'm dying here!

"I might enter the contest." He tosses the apple up in the air and then, with his eyes still locked on mine, he easily catches it. "But I'm thinkin' I might need to hone my skills."

"What, a little out of practice when it comes to your pie eating skills?" Damn, I hope we're on the same page here. He is taking about eating something other than pie, right. I'm not imagining all this, am I? Fact is, when it comes to Jax Declan, I very well could be.

"No," he says, watching me as I walk to the garbage can to get rid of my eaten plum. "But it's hard to find the perfect one," he pauses, his eyes following me as I walk back to stand in front of him. "Some are too sweet, some too tart, and some just too damn bitter." Eyes still right on me, he takes a slow bite of his apple. I hear the peeling break against his teeth, and it shoots straight to my cresting nipples.

"So..." I watch his lips press against the fruit again, and I squeeze my thighs, imagining his mouth between them. "You haven't found your 'just right' pie yet?"

His eyebrows flicker as he chews on the apple. I wipe my bottom lip, 'cause as he mentioned, drooling is not beauty queen decorum, and observing him eating that damn apple and talking about freaking pies—hell, it's got me torqued.

I'm not usually this easy, but Jax Declan always had a way about him that reached right in and made my entire body kick and scream like a kid refused at the candy store. He's never gone as far as playing with me as he is now. Our chats, typically started by me, usually ended with his polite but short responses. Our conversations never lasted longer than a few sentences. God knows I tried, but no matter what I threw at the guy, he refused to take the bait.

Until, today. Yay me...I think?

"So, tell me, Emmie Rue, what are you doing back in the Bayou?"

"Rayna, me, and a friend of ours are staying at Rayna's sister's place on Dolphin Road for the summer. We thought it'd be fun to come back and, ya know, see everyone." I shove my fingers into the back pockets of my shorts, which lifts my shirt, and I know my belly's exposed. Yeah, that's me, trying to throw myself at Jax Declan, yet again. Old habits die hard. But there's no shame in going after what you want, and a small part of me thinks he might just take the bait. "Looks like much hasn't changed, though." I glance around and come back to him with a smile.

He takes another bite of his apple. His eyes roll down my body, pausing at my bellybutton. "You're right about that," head tilted downward, he looks up at me, "looks like you're still trying to use that body of yours to get what you want."

"And if I am?" I push my fingers deeper into my back pockets. I will not back down. He's not going to make me shrink back into my skin with those hard, unreadable eyes. "Tell me, Jax, is it working?"

He stares at me for a few excruciating seconds, then tosses his eaten apple into the garbage can. He picks up his glove from the table and slaps it into his hand. He looks back at me, chuckles lightly, and his gaze holds my breath for a few seconds. His grin wanes and his eyes darken. "Maybe, I'll see you around."

"Oh, you can bet on that." I sweetly smile as I watch his fine ass walk away.

####

####  CHAPTER THREE

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

I flip the eggs in the frying pan. Zeke strolls in, hair sticking out every which way, jeans still on but unbuttoned. "Mornin', fucker," I say as I turn back to my food.

"Mornin', buttercup." He leans over my shoulder. "Wanna make me a couple of those?"

"No." I scoop up the eggs, slide them on the plate, and toss some bacon next to them. I hand my breakfast to him. "Here." I can't deny my little brothers anything; a problem I've had since our parents died.

"Thanks, dude." He picks up a piece of bacon and pops it in his mouth.

"Thought you were gonna stay away from Missy Mills." I shake my hands, mocking his earlier gesture. "Too clingy."

"She agreed to the rules." He shrugs and plops down in a chair at the table.

My little bro and his damn rules—every girl in Galveston County knows about them, has agreed to them or is considering them. I tilt my head and look out the window at Missy Mills' black Monte Carlo. "Looks like it didn't last long. She already broke rule number three," I glance over at him, "no sleepovers."

"Fuck. She was trashed. I couldn't let her drive home like that." He picks up another piece of bacon. Zeke might be a player, but he has a big heart. For some reason, there just ain't any room in it for love. "Gave her my bed and I slept in the den." He shoves more of my breakfast into his mouth.

"I don't know. I'm thinkin' you were right to let her alone, 'cause I got a feelin' you're gonna have trouble with that one."

"Nothin' I can't handle. Hey," his brows lift, "ya know who I think I mighta saw yesterday? Rayna."

"Yeah. Emmie Rue and Rayna are staying at her sister's place for the summer."

"Oh-ho. Emmie Rue," Zeke says with a shit-eaten-grin.

"What?"

"Oh, come on, dude. I know you always had a hard-on for that girl. Why do you think I never hit that pretty little ass?"

"Fuck you." I turn back to the stove, not about to have this conversation with my little bro.

"Fuck _Emmie Rue_ ," Zeke taunts.

"Hey, watch it, fucker," I glance over my shoulder and point the spatula at him. "You're not too old for me to give ya a good ass whoopin'."

"I'd like to see you try it, old man."

I jump forward and lunge my fist. Zeke's head snaps back. He's quick, always has been.

"You missed." He laughs.

"Yeah," I smirk, "meant to." Though, I should've knocked him on his ass. He's given me nothing but shit since I turned thirty last month. I'm getting real tired of the jabs. I slump back against the counter, crossing my arms over my chest. "Does Slate know Rayna's in town?"

"Nay, he's been in bed since he stumbled in yesterday morning. He doesn't know what's happenin' out in the real world."

"You check on him at all?"

"Yeah, he's still alive. I had gone in his room before I came in here, gave him a poke, and he growled at me. But I don't think he's gonna make it tonight. You might have to cover for him."

"Fuck that, what about Rocko? He's been itchin' to get in."

Zeke shakes his head. "He's in Austin for work or some shit. Won't be back till Sunday."

"Fuck!" There's no way I'm taking over for Slate tonight. I scrub a hand over my unshaven chin. Damn, I need to shave. "Hey. What about Tommy?"

Zeke smirks. "He won't last longer than ten seconds and you know it." He stands up, carries his plate over to the sink, and sets a hand on my shoulder. "Sorry, geezer. You're gonna have to pull up those saggin' balls of yours for the night, and get back in the saddle. That, or go get Slate's ass up, but I'm thinkin' that'll cause more damage than good."

"Shit." I shrug his hand off my shoulder, knowing he's right.

"I'll let Rusty know to put you on the roster tonight instead of Slate. I think you're with McLaren, the kid from Pasadena." He walks out of the kitchen saying, "Don't worry, old geezer. We all know you still got it."

Appetite gone, I throw the spatula in the sink and click off the stove. I slip on my sneakers and head out the door, needing to exhort my rising agitation with a good run. Plus, it'll do the muscles some good. Get 'em pumped for tonight.

Four miles into my run, I reach Tiki Island and stop. I place my hands on my knees to catch my breath and peer out at the Galveston Bay. Man, it's beautiful.

"You're tough to keep up with," Emmie Rue says, as she skids alongside me. And like me, she bends over, breathing heavy.

I look at her from the corner of my eye, skin glistening with sweat. "You following me, Emmie Rue?"

"Yeah, since I caught sight of you leaving the Bayou," she swallows some more air, "but damn," she takes another deep breath, "you're fast." She stands up, bouncing from one foot to the other, her perky tits bobbing up and down. "It's called jogging for a reason."

I straighten to my full height. "Huh, I thought it was called running." I reach for the collar of my t-shirt and pull it down to let some air in. "So, you jog?"

"Everyone in Manhattan jogs," she flicks her head and the piece of hair hanging over her left eye jumps back into place, "or at least they like to brag about it."

"And you? You like to brag about it or are ya gettin' it done?" In Manhattan? So that's where she's been.

"Oh, I jog, but normally only around five miles. I get the rest done at the gym," she says. "What was that, about five miles?" She looks behind us.

"Four, I try to do around eight every other day, and like you, I get the rest done at the gym."

"It's working," her eyes run down the length of my body, making me want to take my shirt completely off to cool the fuck down. "What are you now, thirty? Oh, yeah," she points at me with a grin, "you just had a birthday, didn't you?"

I slowly nod. She remembers my birthday, that's odd. Then again, I remember hers, too. December 13. I waited patiently for her eighteenth birthday. Counted down those last few months, eliminating each day in my head, anticipating the day she'd be old enough for me to claim her.

A few years older than her, my attraction to Emmie Rue, when it struck, scared the fuck out of me. I was too old for her. Besides, she needed time to spread her wings, and I needed time to learn how to control mine. And sure, back then, other guys my age were dating girls still in high school, but that wasn't for me. I was okay with it, too. Until, every chance she got, Emmie Rue started throwing her beautiful body at me. Still, I held strong, but one week before I could get what I so desperately wanted, the week before Emmie Rue's eighteenth birthday, Grams passed away. And that left me with the job of looking after my two out-of-hand younger brothers. At twenty-one, I didn't know what the hell I was doing. Two years later, when I started getting my shit back together, Emmie Rue went away to college.

"Yeah, and Zeke won't let me forget it." I turn to her. "You gonna be able to make it back?"

"Yep," she sets her hands on her tight spandex-covered hips, "even if it kills me."

"Always the confident one," I grimace; something that got her in more trouble than not. I wanted to kick the shit out of every high school punk in her class. But I was an adult, and that'd only get my ass tossed in jail.

She thrusts those perfect lush breasts out and smirks at me. I scowl. The damn girl's always using that gorgeous, seamless body of hers to affect men. It's not gonna work on me. I've waited too long, and I refuse to settle for just Emmie Rue's body.

"Jax," she tilts her head as if interpreting my mounting agitation, "are you gay?"

Wow. Hey now, where the fuck did that come from? I get that I didn't respond to her flirtation just now, but gay? I stare at her, trying to keep my expression flat.

"It's just I don't recall you dating anyone while you were in high school, and I can't remember seeing you with any girls after you graduated, and..." She presses her lips together. "Well, if you're gay. It'd be okay."

"I know it'd be okay if I'm fucking gay," I snap. I have a few friends who are gay. I'm cool with it. No homophobic shit going on here. But does she really think I swing that way? Looking back, yeah, okay, maybe I was discreet about my sexual activities. After my first experience, well, things didn't go so well. It had taken me another year before I tried it again.

"I'm sorry." She waves a hand at me. "It's none of my business. It was rude of me to ask."

"You're damn right it was." My hands fist at my sides. Stunned and, really, unable to come up with a better response. Gay? Me? Really?

"Come on, let's head back," she says, saving me from grabbing her and showing her how wrong she is. "But I'm warning you," she jogs in place, "you may have to carry me part of the way."

I give her a tight smile, and we head out to the road. Muscles burning from the run and from what Emmie Rue said. It's driving me insane, her thinking that I'm not attracted to her. Shit, she'd be a lot safer if I preferred men.

Did she think for all those years I denied her because I was gay? Hell, I would've welcomed to desire anything other than her. Shit would've been a lot easier not aching for her every day.

"I'm getting off here," she calls from over her shoulder when we reach Dolphin Road. "I'll see you around," she says, sending her new 'gay' friend a sweet smile. Then, she turns back to the road.

Fuck that. I can't let her leave me right now thinking what she thinks. I grab her wrist. Her back crashes against me. I turn her around. Our eyes meet. We're both breathing heavy. We stand staring at each other as we catch our breath. Then, she opens her mouth, but I hush her with a finger to mine. And like a good girl, she obeys. Fuck, my cock likes that.

I push the fallen hair back from her forehead with a finger and cup the sides of her sweaty face in my hands. Damn. She feels like wet silk. I drop my eyes to her partially opened mouth and lean forward until our lips are but a hair's breadth away. I look back up into her bright blue eyes, slide my thumb out, and run it along her plump bottom lip. Her eyes flutter. Head tilting back a little, she bites the lip I just caressed.

"Em." I gently pull her lip down from her teeth with the pad of my thumb. "The only tight place my cock likes to be is deep inside a woman."

Eyes hooded, she gazes up at me. "Ah," she licks her bottom lip again, "that's good to, ah," she clears her throat, her long lashes batting up at me, "to know."

"Now," I chuckle, "I don't know about that." I drop my hands from her face, the look in her eyes telling me that the wait for Emmie Rue will definitely be worth it. "Maybe," I smile, "I'll see you around, huh," I say, before jogging back toward the road completely satisfied that I cleared up the whole I'm not gay shit.

####

####  CHAPTER FOUR

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

"Ladies, your chariot awaits," I hear Rayna yell from outside.

Lurlene peeks out the screen door. "She's got a damn golf cart with lights on it, pink ones, and they're blinking."

"Yeah, most people on the Bayou have 'em. The golf cart, not the lights." I pick up my purse. "Leave it to Rayna to deck ours out like a damn Christmas tree. Come on, let's go."

I lock up and follow Lurlene down the stairs. It's getting dark. The sun is nearly gone from the horizon.

"Oh-ho, look at you," Rayna fans her face, "you're smokin'," she turns to me. "You did that?"

"She looks great, doesn't she?" I beam at Lurlene.

"I guess those pageants your mother put you through didn't all go to waste. You transformed this girl into a princess," Lurlene says, fluffing her dark copper hair. "Well," she drops her hand, "at least, I feel like one."

"Oh, there was always a princess in there. She just needed some coaxing to come on out," I say. She really is a pretty girl in a wholesome, innocent way. That's why I didn't put too much make-up on her, just a little lip-gloss and some mascara. I did, however, enhance her nicely rounded B-cups with a snug shirt and talked her into wearing a short skirt to show off her long legs.

I glance at Rayna in a low cut t-shirt and tight skinny jeans. "So, what kind of trouble do you have planned for us tonight?"

"You know me so well." She laughs. "I ran into Melody Richards, you remember her?"

Oh, I remember Melody Richards. We'd gone to her house after prom. My date got drunk and a tad too frisky at the party. He was having difficulty hearing me when I said "no." Luckily, Rayna and Slate found us in the basement. And everyone in high school knew Zeke was the fighter when it came to the Declan brothers, not Slate. So, when Slate told my date to back off, he ignored him and continued to push me to leave with him. And I mean he physically pushed me. But Slate came to my rescue. Surprising us all, he beat the shit out of my date.

The cops showed up, and then a few minutes later so had Jax. And the look on his face was frightening as hell for it was aimed directly at me.

Jax knew one of the officers, went to school with him or something, and after Jax had spoken to him, the cop let Slate off. Jax instructed Slate to take Rayna home. Then he turned to me and ordered me into his car.

That night in his car was the first time I'd ever been alone with Jax. Eyes fixed on the road, he didn't say a word as he drove me home. And the tightness in his jaw, coupled with the furrow in his brow, made a part of me feel as though I'd disappointed him. I had, after all, teased my date to oblivion. It was my niche.

When we got to my house, all I wanted to do was get away from Jax and all of his graphic disapproval. I reached for the door handle, but he stopped me. He grabbed my arm, and when our skin touched, a rush of heat, fear, and anticipation had washed through me. Then he called me Em—no one ever called me that, but I liked hearing him say it. "You okay," he said, and unable to find my voice, I only nodded. "He didn't..." He paused and his face hardened.

"Oh! No," I quickly responded, understanding what he was getting at. It had come real close, but thankfully, his brother had saved me.

He let out a loud, gruff sigh, and his hand tightened on my arm. "What happened to you, it wasn't your fault. You hear me?" Head lowered, embarrassed to the bones, I nodded again. "Some boys can get rough," his voice softened, "some don't always listen when you tell them to stop, and some boys, they're just monsters." He placed a finger under my chin and lifted my head until our eyes met. "You gotta be careful who you play with, okay, Em?" Once more, all I could do was bob my head up and down. "Now, go on," he said and dropped his hands from me.

I jumped out of that car, ran right into my house, straight up to my bedroom, and I cried my eyes out.

Still, even to this day, when I'm flirting with some guy, like a warning bell, Jax's words ring in my ears. And because of that, I honestly don't get around as much as I lead people to believe.

I climb in the golf cart. "Yeah, I remember Melody."

"Well, I ran into her today, said she's working at some new bar on Bowden Street."

"Where the abandoned mobile homes are," I ask.

"Yep, that's the spot. It's called Jay's. I told her that we'd stop by for a few. Sound good?"

"I'm game," Lurlene says, and I shrug my shoulders as if I really have a choice.

Ten minutes later, we pull into a parking lot full of cars, trucks, and golf carts. There's a neon sign in the front of the huge barn-like establishment.

"Are you sure this is the right place, the sign says JZS, not Jay's." I glance at Rayna.

"I'm sure it is." Lurlene gets out of the cart, yanking on her skirt. "If you don't spell out the letters, they'd sound the same."

"Excuse me, little Ms. English teacher," I say, as Rayna and I climb out of the cart, too.

Lurlene smirks at me. "Jeez, Emmie, this skirt is too damn short," she complains as she tugs at it again.

"Stop it," Rayna slaps her hand, "you look hot. Hey, maybe we'll see Zeke here tonight."

"Speakin' of the Declan brothers," I look at Rayna, who's readjusting her bra, "have you seen Slate yet?"

"No," she says, dropping her hand and glancing at the bar. "Come on," she hooks her arms into mine and Lurlene's, "let's get in there, and cause some trouble. You never know, perhaps we'll see Jax tonight, too. And now that we know he's obviously not gay, maybe you can break that boy."

"Ah, Rayna, he's not a boy anymore," I say.

"Even better." She laughs as we push through the front door and enter the bar.

The place is far smaller than it looks from the outside. Rustic, original stained wood covers the walls. There are a couple dozen people inside, and the music isn't too loud, just low enough to hear yourself talk. I hate when you can't hear your own voice in a bar. We spot Melody right away. The years have been good to her. With a tray full of beers, in a checkered blue and white flannel tied just below her breasts, she comes right over to us.

"I'm so glad you guys made it," she says and leans in for a hug. So not to hit the tray, I carefully one arm her. "You look great, Emmie."

"Thanks, so do you," I pull back from the half-ass embrace. "This is Lurlene, a friend of ours from Manhattan."

"Hi." Melody smiles. "Yeah, Rayna said you were all staying at her sister's for the summer. That's awesome."

"Oh, my God!" A blonde waitress barges in on our conversation. Hands fisted, she's bouncing on her heels. "Did you hear who's on tonight?"

"Yeah, I heard," Melody rolls her eyes at us.

"He's on now! Can you watch my tables," she squeezes her hands together, "Please, please, please!"

"Sure," Melody says, rewarded by a chaste kiss on the cheek from the animated blonde.

"Who the hell is that and what is she talking about," Rayna asks, watching the girl bounce away.

"That's Jenny. She's not so bad, just a little flighty. And she's talking about what's going on behind those doors," Melody nudges to the back. "It's where the action really happens in this place."

"What kind of action," Rayna's eyebrow raises.

"MMA fights," Melody says.

"Are you kidding me?" My eyes widen and I grab Lurlene and Rayna's hand. "Oh, we gotta check this out. Melody, can you bring us a few beers?"

"You haven't changed a bit, Emmie. Always gotta be where the action is," she laughs. "Sure, I'll bring them back to you guys in a few."

"Thanks," I say as Rayna opens the door and the spotlights hanging from the ceiling blind me.

Lurlene's behind me, pushing me forward. And through the shouting crowd and the high cage, I catch flashes of the fighters' bodies. Adrenaline pumps through my veins. I always wanted to see a live MMA fight. Near naked, tatted, muscle bound men fighting in a cage—there's something so fiercely savage and sexy about it.

In no time, through Rayna's pushy attitude, we reach the front.

With the smeared blood on his chest, the guy on the floor looks like he put up a good fight, but I don't think he's going to be able to break free from the chokehold of the burly guy leaning across his throat. I can't see floor guy's face, but damn, his body is flawless. There's a tatt running up from the waist of his black boxer shorts and another tatt on his thigh. It ripples over his muscles as he slams his foot into the mat. The ref hunches over them, and I'm thinking sexy beast on the floor is a goner. No way is he getting back up from the floor. Then his hips gyrate upward and he overtakes burly guy. He throws him forward, and as floor guy rises, everything inside of me shuts right the fuck down.

No! It can't be!

"Holy shit!" Rayna gasps. "Is that Jax?"

I can't look at her, can't utter a damn word. Shocked by the sight before me, all I can do is latch my fingers into the holes of the cage and try to pull myself closer. Is that really the polite and collected Jax Declan covered in tatts? Could that magnificent body, viciously attacking and kicking burly guy's ass, belong to Jax? The same man, who just slammed his head into burly guy's gut, picked him up, and then dropped him on the floor?

Oh, fuck. I'm in trouble here. I thought the pie tease was a bit risky behavior for the mild-mannered Jax Declan but this. Shit, I mighta bit off a lot more than I can chomp on when it comes to _this_ Jax Declan.

Just as they call the fight because burly guy can't get back off the floor, I hear Lurlene behind me say, "Oh, I get it. JZS. Jax, Zeke, and Slate, this has to be their bar. Right?"

I spin around. Mouths dropped, Rayna and I both look at her. Rayna's eyes flash to me. "No! They don't own this place, do they," she says. Still speechless from what I just witnessed, I stand with my mouth dropped open. "I knew their father was a boxer, but," Rayna glances at the cage, and then hits me in the arm. "He's leaving." She whacks me again, and God knows I need that smack to knock me back into reality. "You gotta go after him and find out."

I turn, and looking larger than life, Jax's huge form heads toward a door in the back of the room.

"Go," Lurlene says, pushing me, followed by Rayna swatting me in the ass, urging me on, too.

I take a step. He pulls the door open, and the light in front of him casts all around his body. Then it swallows him up and takes him from me. He disappears as the door closes behind him.

####

####  CHAPTER FIVE

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I pull the door open to a long hall. Smack dab in the middle of it is a lithe and powerful animal, strength and beauty, an exquisite arrangement of muscles in a virile male body. My heart beats hard. I pick up my steps. My heels click on the hardwood floor. There's no way he can't hear me. Still, he just keeps strutting forward. Dammit.

"Jax!" His feet come to a halt. His head turns and those dark eyes land hard on me, quivering every cell in my body. My heart gallops, and I think my feet might have, too. I make it to him in no time at all.

His eyes take a real slow stroll down my tight cami, my skirt, and they pause a second at my heels. Then they flash back up, making my heart and hormones flutter that much more. "What are ya doing back here, Em?"

I set my hands on my hips. Damn, I love when he calls me Em. "I think the bigger question is what the hell were you doing out there? You fight?"

He turns around to face me, hands taped and balled at his sides, sweat glistening upon every muscle on his bare chest. "Sometimes," he hefts his naked shoulder as if what I just saw out there was no big deal, just another day at the office. Hell, he was magnificent.

"Do you own this place?"

"Zeke, Slate, and me, yeah." He brushes a hand over his already tousled short dark hair. "Look, I gotta take a shower," he says, and I get the feeling he's trying to get rid of me. But he's not getting off that easily.

I take a step closer. After watching what his beautiful body is capable of, closer is all I want to be. My eyes stroll down the hard slab of his belly, but I don't make it to his feet. Instead, my momentary pause lands on his crotch. Then, from beneath the hoods of my lids, I peer up at him. "You want some company in the shower?"

"Now, Emmie Rue," his hand drops from his head, "you don't wanna go teasin' me." His lip curls, hands clutching and releasing at his sides as if still pumped from the fight.

I arch a brow. "Maybe I do."

"No. You don't," a husky but dangerous chuckle rumbles from him. "I'm not one of your boy toys you can play with."

"Who says," I place a finger on his chest and run it down along his tattoo, following the tribal art to the waist of his shorts, "I'm looking for a toy?"

"Oh, you're lookin' for somethin', but the games I like to play aren't always nice," he snatches my hand, "and I can assure you that I don't always follow the rules."

"What rules?" I swallow hard from the strong, firm grip of his hand on my wrist.

He laughs, releasing me. "The kind of rules beauty queens expect."

"I'm not that girl anymore." My skin tingles where he touched me.

"Yeah. Maybe not." His eyes drop to my mouth. "Still, I'd take you to a place where even all grown-up princesses are afraid to go."

"Well, then, it's good that I'm not a princess, either."

"No?" A crooked grin tugs on his sexy mouth.

I tilt my head and smile up at him. "No."

"Well, then," he says, hands fisting at his sides, pecs flexing, "show me you're not afraid to get dirty. Get on your knees."

My courage and smile slowly wanes. "What?"

"Get down on your knees and suck my cock."

Not ever did I think such a wicked thing could come out of Jax Declan's mouth. Shit, it's fucking making me hot. Who the hell is this guy? I look to the left then the right. Am I considering it? "But anyone could come along and see us," I say with logic, attempting to talk myself out of it.

"And?" His brow arches.

"They'd see me sucking your cock."

"And?" The side of his mouth lifts a little higher.

"And... and that's just not right."

"I warned you, there's no right or wrongs when it comes to me," his grin spreads. "Now why don't you run along? I'm sure there's a guy back at the bar that'll play by your safe rules."

"What are you doing, Jax?" I glare at him. "You trying to warn me again? Are you one of those boys who like to play rough? Don't always listen to a girl when she says no?"

"As a matter of fact," his eyes go dark, "you could beg and scream, but the only way to stop this _man_ , is by saying two words."

"Yeah, and just what two words are those?"

"What? Thinkin' you might be needin' them? Are you gonna get on your knees for me, princess?"

"The words," I urge.

"No. More."

"No more?" I study him, nibbling my bottom lip. Is he serious? "So, let me get this straight when you're with a woman, and things get a little rough, she says "no more" and you stop."

"Only then." He nods.

I stare at him, assessing that this is definitely something about him that I'm going to need to know—just not today. While everything inside rallies for me to drop down to my knees, and be his little cock slave, I can't bring myself to do it. I'm a tad frightened—excited, but certainly scared. He's right, though, I'm not fucking with some boy here. Jax is all man.

I take a deep breath.

"Well?" His left eyebrow rises. Son-of-a-bitch, he's challenging me. Fuck this. I turn on my heels. I'm not playing his game on a whim. If I want to beat Jax Declan, then I'll need a strategy. I start down the hall. My steps slow. Hold on a damn minute. He's trying to send me away. He wants me to scurry off like some frightened princess! Shit, the hot bastard is already winning!

I whip back around just as his broad shoulder disappears from a doorway. I barrel down the hallway, enter the room he went into, and the door slams shut behind me. It's pitch black. I blink. And as my eyes adjust to the darkness, I feel the pressure of his palm low on my back. He pushes me, and my chest hits the wall. His hard body presses against mine. He drags the hair from my shoulder. His warm breath brushes over my neck.

"Changed your mind? Ya ready to play now, Em?"

"I'm here, aren't I," I say, impressed that my fear didn't weed its way into my voice.

"Pull your skirt up around your waist."

Call me crazy, desperate, or wanting, but I don't throw in the towel. Could be that I can't see him, or that I want him too much to deny myself his touch. I start to yank up the tight material. He doesn't back away or give me any room. His body holds close to mine, and in a G-string, my naked ass cheeks rub against his silky shorts. Damn, it feels good.

"Your shirt and bra, pull them up, too. I want 'em off your tits."

Heart banging in my rib cage, I start at the hem of my shirt. I work my fingers up into the seam of my bra and tug until my throbbing heavy mounds pop free.

"Now, put your hands on the wall and don't move."

I feel for the wall and set my palms on it. His body retreats, and with my breasts flat against the cool wall and my naked backside free of his shorts, I'm suddenly vulnerable and exposed.

His fingers slip under the tiny string at my hips. Taking his time, he drags the thin material down my thighs. He taps my ankle. "Lift," he says, stern and resolute. His tone forces me to pick up my foot, helping him as I step out of my panties. His warm touch slithers back up between my thighs. "Spread your legs." Upon his utter command, my feet slide apart. "I want to fuck you hard with my finger," he hisses close to my ear and every muscle braces for the intrusion. My nails scratch the wall as I wait for him to enter me. "But, as much as I like it dirty, I'm covered in another man's sweat and blood, and there's no way I'm going to fill your sweet tight pussy with that kind of filth. So, instead," his words vibrate through me as I hear a ripping sound, and I can only assume he's removing the tape from his hand, "I'm gonna teach you a lesson about teasing me. Push your ass out." Again, with the command of his words, my hips sway back, and I've never felt so sexy in my life. His hand comes down hard on my ass cheek. He! Holy shit, he hit me! The sound of his flesh striking mine not only echoes in the room, but it pulsates to my pussy. "And," he smacks me again, heat followed by a slow burn ripples over my tender skin, "the next time you come to me with the desire to fuck in your eyes," he strikes my ass harder, "I expect you to do exactly as I say." He fists a lock of my hair and yanks my head back. Voice low and close to my ear, he says, "And if you do that then just maybe after I've had my way with you, I'll treat you like a princess." His teeth sink into my neck then soft lips swipe over my sensitive flesh. "Now, say it. Tell me what you want."

"I want you." I say the absolute truth, shaking all over with it, hips swaying, teeth grinding, and pussy dripping with wetness. Fuck! How I want him.

"Put your hand between your legs," he says, and I eagerly follow instructions. I need release. The second my fingertip touches my wet folds, a cry rolls deep in my throat. "You want me to touch you there?"

"Yes." I bite my lip, shaking my head.

"Yes. You do," he tugs on my hair. "That's it, keep touching that pussy," his warm lips speak harsh against my neck. "Rub your clit, and don't fuck around. No playing. Find that spot, the one that makes you come, and stroke it."

"Jax..." I place my forehead on the wall, rolling it while working myself.

"Where do you want my cock?"

"Right now," I lick my lips and close my eyes, "I want it in my mouth." And I'm not into sucking a guy's dick, but I want to taste his, lick it and suck him off until he blows his load. I want him to surrender and give me everything he's denied.

"And if I were to put my cock into your mouth, how much of me do you think you could take?"

"All of it," I say between whimpers.

"No," his chuckle traces my straining throat with his warm breath. "Em, you couldn't manage it all." He pulls my hair harder. "But I'd want it deep, so deep it makes you gag. Would you do that for me?"

"Yes. Oh, shit!" My finger moves faster on my clit. Every time he says something, I get that much closer to exploding. "I need to—"

"No. Not yet." He presses his pelvic hard into my ass, trapping me, and my hand to the wall. I can't move my fingers. "I'd want to come in your mouth, and I'd expect you to swallow, too." The thickness of his hard cock crushed up against my ass confirms that he's right. There's no way I could fit it all in my mouth, but damn, I'd give a good try.

"Jax, I'd swallow it all." I try to move my hand, but he's too strong. "Please, Jax! I need to come."

He drags me backward by the hair, turns me around, and pins my hands to the wall. I barely make out the silhouette of his body that's now in front of mine, but I feel it all through me. "Kiss me," I breathe in the darkness.

"Sorry, Em," his deep voice scraps over my skin, "but there'll be no kissing today."

"What?" I blink, trying to see him more clearly.

"You need to learn that your body is meant for more than just looking pretty or to tease men. Among other things, it's meant to feel, too."

"Believe me, there are all kinds of feeling going on right now."

"Oh. I know. But if I do decide to fuck you, I'm gonna want to experience all of your layers, touch and feel every one of them. "

"What do you mean _if_ you decide?"

"I told you before, I'm very selective," his lips brush along my neck, "about whose pie I eat." Mouth barely touching me, it moves up my chin, past my cheek, stilling at my ear. "Now, I'm gonna go take that shower." He pulls my bra and shirt down over my chest. "Then I'm going to the bar." His fingers find my skirt, and he tugs that down, too. "And while I'm away, I expect you to behave yourself."

With the wall behind me, holding my trembling body erect, the room comes to life with light. I barely catch a glimpse of Jax's arm as he disappears from the door. I look around at the small office, still catching my breath. I rest my head against the wall and close my eyes. Holy shit! I touch my thundering chest. I'm definitely in trouble here.

####

####  CHAPTER SIX

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

I get out of the shower, dry myself off, get dressed, and stop by Slate's room. I flick on the light. He's asleep, curled up in a ball with a sheet tangled around him. Whenever I see him like this, I want to go over and hold my little brother, and then I want to beat the shit out of the man he's become. At the rate he's going, he'll be dead before he makes it to my age. I don't know what I can do to help him. I watch for his breaths, for the slow rise and fall of his chest. When I'm convinced that he's okay, I flick the light switch off and head back to the bar to deal with Emmie Rue. That is if she's still here.

I wouldn't blame her for leaving; I left the woman all keyed up in my office. While I was in the shower, I rubbed one out imagining her still in there, fingers deep inside her slick wetness. Fuck. I wanted to touch her. I'm glad I couldn't, though. That's not the way I'd want to take her, at least, not for the first time.

I reach the front bar. The place is jam packed. Scanning the room, I spot Em at the bar and I let out the breath I didn't realize that I was holding. Fuck, I'm not sure how I feel about how relieved I am that she's still here.

"Jax," Rusty, my best bartender comes sprinting over to me. "Can you watch the bar for a few," she presses her thighs together and leans forward, "I gotta pee."

Just like Rusty for the visual. "Yeah," I laugh, "wouldn't want any accidents behind the bar."

"Thanks." She gives me a quick smile and takes off to the bathroom.

I shimmy my way through the crowd and slide behind the bar. "Ya, what can I get you ladies," I say to three brunettes decked out in their best fuck-me clothes.

"Your number," the one with blood red fingernails holding the money says as her eyes rake over me. I put my hands on the bar, smile, and wait. It usually works. "You're not given that out though, are you, handsome," she says. I shake my head. "Okay," she gives me a cute pout, "then gimme two light beers, whatever's on tap, and do you have wine?"

"We got Merlot or Zinfandel, that's it."

"Okay, Merlot. Thanks," she turns to say something to her friend.

I spin around to pour the beers and the wine, glance up, and I can't hold back any longer. I look over at Em. She's watching me as I lean forward to hand the drinks to the women.

Dagger-nails slides the money across the bar. "Keep the change."

"Thanks." I go to grab the cash and her hand lands on top of mine.

"Are you sure you don't want to give me your number?"

"Sorry, hon," I smile, trying to keep the customer somewhat happy, "but my number's already taken."

"Well, she's a lucky girl." She pulls her hand back. Yeah, lucky, now I don't know about that. "Gotta respect an honest man. They sure are hard to come by these days." She winks at me and takes her drink.

I pick up the money, toss it in the till, and take a few more orders. Rusty comes back, looking relieved. "Oh my God, I thought my bladder was going to burst. Melody's been busy in the back. But I'm good. Thanks, Jax."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, yeah." She shoos me away with a hand.

I wander down to the end of the bar to Em and her friends, rest my elbows on it, and lean in. "Hey, Rayna," I say and nod at the other woman with them.

"How the hell are ya, Jax?" Rayna slaps her hand on the bar.

I can see she has a good buzz going on. I always liked the girl. She was good for Slate. "I'm doin' okay," I say. She looks good, too. Shit, I hope she doesn't ask about Slate.

"So, you and your brothers own this place?"

"Yeah, opened it a couple years back. It's doin' okay."

"Looks like it," Rayna glances around. "Watched you fight, you kicked ass."

"Yeah, he did," Melody says, as she walks up with an empty tray in her hand. "The last time I saw you fight was eons ago. Shit. Who was it," she stares at me then her eyes light up. "Oh, I remember! It was that guy you went to the prom with," she turns to Emmie Rue. "What was his name?"

"Garret Roberts," Emmie says, and I feel her eyes burning into me. I don't look at her. But, hey, we both know that fucker had it coming for what he did to her back in high school. So, yeah when he walked in here and signed up for a fight, I made sure it was me he was gonna be in the cage with. He was, after all, now a legal age for me to kick his ass.

"Yeah, that's it," Melody points at me. "I was surprised to see your name next to Garret's on the roster that night. That fight lasted what, like thirty seconds. You slaughtered him, and," she glances at the girls, "Jax never fights."

"Yeah, I can't afford to end up with a concussion or something. Then who'd manage the bills and keep the staff in line here?" I smile at Melody.

"So what reason did you have to fight tonight," Em says.

"Slate was supposed to fight, wasn't he," Melody jumps in.

I nod my head and glance at Rayna. Fuck.

Her eyes go wide. "Slate fights?"

"Yeah," Melody leans in toward Rayna, "and don't tell Zeke, but Slate brings in the biggest crowd. Sorry, I didn't tell ya your ex owns this place, but honestly, he's rarely here, only comes when he fights, and I heard earlier that he wasn't gonna be on tonight."

I see Rayna's mouth about to open. But needing to sway away from a conversation that involves my fucked-up little bro with his ex-girlfriend, I say, "So, who's your friend, here?" I look over at the cute redhead next to Rayna.

"Oh," Rayna blinks, "this is, ah...Lurlene."

"Nice to meet you." I smile, and after Lurlene returns the gesture, my eyes wander over to Em. Like when I was serving those chicks at the bar, and when she discovered I kicked her prom date's ass, she's vigilantly watching me.

"Ah," Lurlene says, "Rayna and I are going to go check out what's happening in the back bar. Wanna join us, Melody?" I get the sense she's trying to give me and Emmie Rue some alone time. I like the girl already, and I'm all good with it. Besides, I don't want to talk about Slate. I'm not sure what I'd tell Rayna.

"I'll meet up with you. I need to get some drinks for a customer first," Melody says, and then she heads behind the bar.

Not taking her eyes from mine, Em stirs the straw around in her drink. When the girls take their leave, she lifts the glass up for a sip. "I bet that happens a lot," she says setting her glass back down.

"What's that," I arch a brow, "naughty girls following me into dark rooms after a fight?"

"No, smartass," she scowls, cheeks flaring bright red. "I was talking about the woman hitting on you at the bar," she says, back to stirring her drink with those beautiful blue eyes glaring up at me.

"Oh, those ladies." I smile. "They're just drunk." I shrug. "Nothin' to worry about."

"I'm not worried. I've never been the jealous type."

"I wasn't talking about you, princess." I chuckle. "They're nothin' that I need to worry about." I grin.

"Yeah, 'cause if they're bad, you'll just spank them, huh?"

"Come on, Em, admit it."

"Admit what," she glares at me.

I lean toward her. "You liked havin' that ass spanked."

She bends in closer to me. "You call _that_ an ass spankin'?"

A smile breaks across my lips, my cock liking her answer. "I thought it was all a princess could handle."

"Then I guess we were both duped, huh?"

Damn! I want to drag her across the bar, yank her skirt up around her waist, and give her ass a proper spanking. Beat it red. Instead, I hold my smile, pull my cell from my pocket, and slide it across the bar. "Here, put your number in there, in case I want to call you."

"Oh," she picks up the cell, a small grin spreading over her lips, "you're gonna call me," she says, tapping the screen.

"Always the confident one." I rest my forearms on the bar.

"It really doesn't pay to be anything else." She pushes the phone back to me. "And you will call me."

"We'll see," I lean in toward her and lower my voice, "but until then, I want that pussy of yours untouched, and that includes even by your hand."

"What?" Her pink lips purse as she rests her chin on her hands and peers up at me. "You don't want to think about me finishing what you started back in that room?"

"No need to," I sway closer to those pretty, luscious lips, "I already imagined that while I was in the shower."

"And how'd that go for you?"

"Just as you can _imagine_."

"Oh, I'm imaging, Jax."

"Em, you couldn't begin to imagine the things that I'd do to you. Now, you make sure that pussy of yours goes unscathed."

"Or what?"

"Or you'll discover that not only do I know how to help a damsel in distress, but I also know how to put a damsel into distress. And besides eating pie, another talent I have," I further lean my body across the bar to gain access to her ear, "I'm a master when it comes to discipline."

"Promises, promises, promises," she views me from the corner of her eye, "that's all I'm hearing from you, Jax Declan. I'm starting to think you're nothin' but all talk."

"Is that right," I laugh, "'cause your eyes, they're sayin' something else, Em. They're telling me that the bad girl in you is hoping that just ain't true. In fact, I'm thinking she's tempted to test me. She's curious about what other disciplines I might have in mind for her. But let me warn you, when it comes to a woman's skin, I like to see it flushing red. And I like to make it that way with the firm touch of the palm of my hand." Yeah, it's risky putting that out there, but I need to know if I'm going to scare her, or if maybe she'll be able to handle me.

My heart starts beating again until another small smile slowly slips across her lips. "Now look who's doing the teasing."

"If I am," I whisper, "tell me, Em, is it working?"

She shifts back, looks at me for a few seconds, and with each second, my cock grows another inch behind the bar. Fuck me and my restraint, I promised myself not to give into her right away, but hell, she's too damn tempting. She grabs her purse and stands up, and her eyes stroke me hard, just the way I want her to stroke my cock. "Maybe. I'll see you around, Jax."

I place my hands on the edge of the bar and lift up. "Maybe, you will." I grin, holding it until she walks toward the back to meet up with her friends. Fuck. I'm finished. She has me, and she doesn't even know it. That's okay. I'm gonna keep it that way for a while longer. Emmie Rue is used to getting what she wants, but when it comes to me, she's gonna have to give a little more than she's given to any other guy.

But I gotta be very careful. I can't fuck this up with my brutal needs. I must be patient, and I must remain in control.

####

####  CHAPTER SEVEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

"This is the last one, girls," Lurlene says carrying a bottle of wine.

"That's okay," Rayna lifts her glass, "I'm trashed."

"You should be, this is your fifth refill," Lurlene says.

"Didn't know you were counting, Mom," Rayna smirks, watching the wine as it flows into her glass. "Hey," her eyes flash to me, "where'd we get this one from again?"

"Book Club, and don't start. You know you fell in love with her the second you heard her rendition of _Fifty Shades of Grey._ "

"You're right." Rayna slouches back into the wicker chair. "I do love ya, Lurlene. Emmie gets me in trouble, and you keep me honest. I couldn't ask for any more from my two best gals." She looks up at the sky with a sigh. "God. I forget how beautiful it is here. Look at that moon. It's perfect."

We all look up to appreciate the night's beauty.

"Everyone is a moon and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody," Lurlene quietly says.

"Who's that," I ask Lurlene, who's always quoting somebody.

"Mark Twain." She looks at me. "Ready?" She lifts the wine bottle.

"Please." I hold my glass out to her. I'm trashed too, but I want to keep going. It's been three days, and Jax hasn't called. So getting drunk in the backyard with my two besties is just what I need.

And I tried real hard not to think about him, but it took a day just to get the sting out of my ass. I never had a man spank me before, but I gotta say, I liked the display of dominance, and it felt oddly intimate. Jax stirred something new and exciting inside of me. I didn't want him to stop. I wanted to feel his firm hands all over my body, igniting my flesh with his vigorous control. I'd never admit it, but I didn't want him to stop hitting my ass. In fact, I wanted him to do it harder.

I imagined it last night in bed, the roughness of his hands taking my body with that same possessiveness. Like when I watched him fight, I want that savage part of him unleashed on me. My hand had wandered between my legs last night. I needed release, but I didn't take it. And it wasn't because he told me not to, at least that's what I keep telling myself. I held back because the next time I come, it will be with Jax Declan. I just don't know how long I can hold out, and I hate waiting around for him to call. It's so not me to wait on any guy.

"Rayna," I say after taking a sip of my wine. Damn, I'm getting shitfaced. "Have you seen Slate yet?"

"No," she holds her glass close to her chest, "but I'm not looking for him. So if I do see him then so be it."

"But you're supposed to break that Declan brother." Lurlene sets the bottle on the table and sits down.

"Don't worry, I'll get it done. I'll break his heart. Slate Declan will take one look at me, realize what he's lost, and instant heartbreak. Breaking my Declan brother, easy peasy. What about you?" Rayan looks up at Lurlene.

"I'm on task." Lurlene grins. "I met the philandering Zeke Declan."

"I thought I saw you talking to him at the bar." Rayna waves a finger at her.

"I was, but I'm taking my time. I like to study my subjects so I can determine the best curriculum. But that Zeke Declan, he's a real smooth one."

"I got faith in ya," I say, sipping on my wine.

Lurlene's eyebrow lifts. "And what about you, any progress, yet? Has Jax called?"

"No." I take another sip of the wine, getting that queasy feeling in my belly from the alcohol, the kind that a few aspirin in the morning can't fix.

"Well, that's it," Rayna slaps her hands together. "Let's go." She stands up and places a hand on the table to stop from falling.

"Where to," I ask, knowing deep in my woozy gut that I shouldn't be asking.

"Off to find Jax Declan," she points straight ahead, "to get you laid," her finger shifts to me. "Tonight one of us is going to break a Declan brother, and tag, bitch, you're it."

"No way." I shake my head, but the alcohol coaxes my hormones to go against my momentarily lost sober judgment.

"Oh, come on, now. You want him, Emmie. You've always wanted him." Rayna leans down in front of me, body swaying with her finger still wavering at me. "Now, get your ass up and go get him." She stands up. "And you're driving, Mom." She points at Lurlene. "I counted, too. And you only had two glasses of wine."

"I've never driven a golf cart before," Lurlene says.

"Yeah, and you've never fucked a guy before, but you're taking on the best fuck in the Bayou. I got confidence in ya. Come on." Rayna grabs my arm and pulls me up from the chair. "Come on," she giggles, tugging me, "you know you wanna do this."

Ten minutes later, and one near spillover of the golf cart when Lurlene hit a boulder, we make it to JZS's. Rayna comes stumbling back out of the bar, out of breath, and wavering. "Melody says there's an apartment in the back, and they all live there." She gets in the cart. "Lurlene, to the back of the building." She gestures with a wave of her hand.

"I don't know about this." I squeeze my hands together.

"Don't start second-guessing yourself now." Rayna grabs the bar on the cart as Lurlene spins off.

Unlike the front with all the lights and cars, it's quiet and dark. Only a light shines above the front door, a beacon to my bravery. It's daring me to go get what I want. The golf cart comes to a halt and my palms moisten. I wipe them off on my jeans, thinking some of the alcohol might be seeping out of me. I'm nervous about showing up unannounced at Jax's place.

"Now," Rayna turns to me, "when you get in there, you give my girl a kiss for me."

"Your girl?" Lurlene's face scrunches up.

"Lady," Rayna glances at her, "my dog. I had to leave her with Slate when I moved."

"Oh," Lurlene says.

"I don't know." I rub my sweaty hands over my thighs. "I think maybe I should wait for him to call." What if he has a girl in there? What if he doesn't really want me? What if...

"Hey," Rayne grabs my face cutting off my mental what-ifs. "You're here. Jax is in there. Now, the question is do you want him?"

"Yes." I can't lie.

"Then," Rayna leans in closer, eyes widening, "you go get him, girl."

"Okay!" I nod my head, and before I lose my nerve, again, I grab the bar and haul myself out of the cart. I stumble. Shit, I'm drunk. I watch my feet as I make my way to the front door. I straighten my shoulders, take a deep breath, and rap my knuckles on the door. It swings open, and I lift my head. It's dark inside, and all I see are dark hazel eyes. But even with the hood up on his sweatshirt, I know those distinctive eyes.

"Hiii, Slate," I slur, clear my throat. "Is, ah... is Jax here?" His gaze shifts over my shoulder. I glance behind me. "Yeah, Rayna's with me, over there if you wanna say hi." I look back at him, but he doesn't respond. He just turns around and disappears back into the darkness of the apartment.

Huh. I glance back at my posse and lift my hands out in the air.

"Emmie Rue." I hear Jax's deep southern drawl. I spin around, and whoa, in nothing but a pair of jeans, Jax Declan encourages my bravery to come back out and play. His eyelids lower. "Now," he leans against the door jam, and crosses his arms over a muscle-crowded chest, "what brings you to my doorstep this evening?"

"Ah..." I go to take a step but lose my footing. I nearly fall into him. Shit, real smooth. I slap my hand next to his shoulder on the door frame so that doesn't happen again. I blow the fallen hair out of my face and look up. Damn, he's gorgeous. I sway a little closer. "Thought, maybe you lost my number."

"Nope." He shakes his head. "It's still in my phone," he says with a small smile, eyes gradually casting over my body from head to toe. Shit, what he does to me with those allusive gazes. "So," he says, those sexy eyes finally making their way back to mine, "what's up with the late night visit?"

Dammit. He's looking all in control, all sober and shit. He knows what I'm here for, and he's going to make me say it. I strum the tips of my fingers on the doorframe, staring at him as he patiently waits. "You know why I'm here." There, I said it, and without a single slur.

His head tilts to the side, and he surveys me for another second. "You're drunk, aren't you?"

"Yep." I nod, no sense in denying it now. Hell, I nearly fell into him for Christ's sakes. "I've had a few."

He rubs the back of his neck and takes a deep breath, looking up at me from long dark lashes. "Go home, Em."

"What?" Okay, maybe he doesn't quite understand what's going on here. Maybe he needs me spell this shit out for him. "In case you're not getting it—"

"Oh, princess, I get it." He drops his hand and shoves it into his pocket. "You're drunk and you want to fuck."

"Yeah..." I flip my hands out. "So?"

He bends down to my level, and he smells so damn good, fresh and clean, like he just got out of the shower. " _So_ ," he looks right into me, no doubt, seeing my inebriated, randy soul, "you can turn your cute little ass around and take it back home, 'cause I'm not gonna fuck you."

"Not ever?" Oh fuck, did that shit just come out of my drunk, desperate mouth?

He grabs me by the chin. "Now," his thumb strokes my bottom lip. Damn him and that stroking thumb! "You know the answer to that question."

"And still," I lick my lip, savoring his touch, "you're not inviting me in."

"Not tonight, princess." He shakes his head. "But remember what I said." His hand drops from my face. "I want that pussy untouched. Now be a good girl, Em, do as you're told, and head on home," he says just before he shuts the door in my face. Yeah! In. My. Face. I whip around and stomp back to the cart pissed. Be a good girl? If he'd let me in his apartment, he'd see just how much of a good girl I can be!

"Well," Lurlene says brows lifted.

I slump into the seat, somehow feeling that sting in my ass triggered once more by Jax Declan. "He turned me down. I knew this was a bad idea, but I let you talk me into it," I snap at Rayna, but the expression on her face shuts my anger right off.

She looks up at me, and my heart breaks for her. "Was that Slate," she quietly asks.

I reach out and touch her shoulder. I forget how much she cared about him. They have a history, and no matter what she says, I know she loved that guy with every piece of her heart. "Yeah, it was," I say but keep the fact that he didn't seem like he wanted to see or talk to her to myself.

"You're right." Rayna's eyes lower. "I'm sorry, Emmie, this was a bad idea. Lurlene, take us home."

For a brief moment, I forget about the ass I just made of myself, and I wrap an arm around my friend and hold her all the way home.

####

####  CHAPTER EIGHT

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I stare at my laptop, seeing the words, but I can't concentrate. I pick up my coffee and look around the café. I've been coming here since finding it on the second day of our arrival. It's the perfect place to work. Nothing like the one I go to in Manhattan—the coffee here is better. I'm not into all that flavored shit. I like my coffee black. That's it. No fuss.

Setting down my mug, my eyes land on a hot guy sitting across the room. Dark jeans, a black t-shirt, topped with hair that's a chaotic mess, that sexy kind of messy. He smiles at me, and I smile back, 'cause that's what I do. I flirt. Tease. I make them feel like they might actually have a chance. Why? Well, if they're shallow enough to hit on me on the sole basis that I'm pretty then I enjoy playing with them a bit. Don't get me wrong, I get you need to be attracted to the person you're with, but most men are driven by the dick in their pants, and that's it. So, I like fucking with it without getting my hands dirty.

I hear the bell jingle. I've gotten used to that sound whenever someone enters the café. I glance over. Shit! It's Jax. I slouch down in my chair, trying to hide behind my laptop. I can't face him after he actually let me think that I had a chance and then fucked with me without getting his hands dirty. And I want his hands, and mouth, fucking with me— in the worse way.

"Too late, princess, I saw you through the window." He chuckles.

Dammit. I sit up as he slides into the booth across from me. "Jax," I say with a tight smile. Why! Why does the man have to be so gorgeous all the time? His short hair is messy, just like hot guy across the room. But like the rest of Jax, it's a perfect messy. His white t-shirt grips every muscle beneath it as if the material knows that shit needs to be held firmly. I'm jealous of that damn shirt. I want so badly to hold him firmly there, too.

"Whatchya doin'?" He motions his chin at my laptop.

"I'm working so if you don't mind..." I cross my arms over my chest with a tight smile. Really, I don't want him to leave, but it'd be easier than dealing with another rejection. The last one didn't hit hard until the next morning when I was sober. And, as predicted, the aspirin didn't help. It was a double whammy, hangover with a shot of leftover shame.

"Working? Huh." He sets his forearms on the table, clasping those capable looking hands together. Oh, how I want those hands, as warned, making me flush all over. God, in the worse way, I want him to mark my body with his touch. "So, what does a retired beauty queen do for a living anyway?"

I glare at his smug grin, wanting to swipe it off his beautiful face. But instead of granting myself the satisfaction, I reach down under the table fish my hand through my bag and slap a book on the table. His eyes drift to it. He picks it up, a crease feathering across his forehead.

He lifts the book. "Are you trying to tell me," he glances at the cover, "you're Olive Knight?"

"No." I shake my head. "Open it, the second page."

He does as I say and flips the page. "Huh, no shit," he says, a smile breaking across his full lips. "Editor, E. Rue." He stares at the page for a moment longer, sets it back on the table, and looks up at me. "I like the E. Rue."

"Yeah," I grab the book and drop it back in my bag. "When I worked for an editing company, they thought it sounded better then Emmie Rue. More professional, I guess. I freelance now, but by the time I went out on my own, my name was already established. So I stuck with it."

"I never knew you wanted to be an author," he says, falling prey to the same notion as others. But not every editor wants to be an author.

"I don't. It's not about that. When I get a manuscript from an author, I'm usually the first person to see it. They've poured their heart and soul into this creation, and knowing they trust me with it." I shrug. "I don't know, it's just I get to take this beautiful thing and sort of be its make-up. I add a little blush here, highlight there," I trail off realizing how much of an idiot I must sound like. I just compared myself to make-up, for Christ's sake.

"You make it shine," Jax says with a crooked smile.

"No. Most of the time, it's already shining. I just try to help bring out the glow a little more."

"Sounds like you really like what you do."

"I do." I sit up straighter. "And I'm not too bad at it, either," I beam, proud of my work and my clients.

"So how'd you end up in Manhattan?"

"Rayna," I say, closing my laptop. "She was in Florida for about a year after she left here, but then she moved to Manhattan for a job. I was staying with my mom in Chicago, but she finally met a decent guy, and they got married. I left the editing company that I'd been working at and decided it was time for a change, time for me to move on. I missed Rayna. So, a couple years back, I went to stay with her, and I've been there ever since. What about you? What happened to Gram's store?"

"We lost it in a fire three years ago." He shifts in the booth and glances around the café.

"I'm sorry," I say, seeing a sudden unfamiliar discomfort in him.

"Yeah." He taps the table with the tip of his finger. "We took the insurance money from it, along with the rest of Gram's life insurance and what the fast food chain that's there now offered us for the land and opened JZS's."

"About that, I didn't know you were a fighter."

"I'm not really into it like Zeke and Slate." He stares at me for a moment, and I fall victim to those dark oblique eyes. "I mean, I know how to fight. Ya know my dad was a boxer. He taught us a lot about it before he died, mostly to me because I'm the oldest. I had more time with him. Zeke's good, he has great technique and he's fucking quick, but it's always been in Slate's blood. He's like my dad, a natural, but he never accepted it. Not until," he taps his finger again on the table, "not until we opened JZS's."

"I know. I was surprised to hear that he fights. He was always such an easygoing guy in high school. He never got into any fights like Zeke, and he was so sweet with Rayna."

He stares at me, again, as though he's contemplating his next words. "Yeah, well, he's changed."

"I guess that happens when we grow up, huh? Experiences change us and we sort of see things differently."

"I don't know." His eyes slowly roll over my face. "You're still the same beautiful Emmie Rue I remember."

My cheeks get all hot. He called me beautiful—not pretty, but beautiful. "Yeah, but I get the feeling, Jax Declan, that you're seeing me a little differently."

"I definitely see you, Em." His eyes drop to my mouth then slowly drift back up. "But the way I'm feeling while I'm doing it ain't no different. Now," he leans in toward me, and I get a strong whiff of his intoxicating scent, "tell me again, what brings you back to the Bayou?"

_You_ almost tumbles from my mouth as I stare into those shadowy, daring eyes, still trying to figure out what he meant by his feelings haven't changed. Does that mean he still doesn't want me? He's so confusing.

"Well," I take a deep breath, holding in my frustration. We are, after all, having a conversation. It's something new for us, and I like it. "I can do my job from anywhere. Our friend, Lurlene, she's a teacher, so she has the summers off. And Rayna, she just got out of a relationship, and she's sort of between jobs. It was her idea to come here."

"So, I have Rayna to thank?"

"For what?"

His smile turns up on both sides, and he reclines back in the booth. He doesn't say anything. He just looks at me. Wait. Is he being sarcastic? Shit. Perhaps, he really doesn't want me. And me, I've been that teenage girl all over again, throwing myself at him.

"Listen..." I clear my throat, time to pull up my big-girl pants. I know when to admit when I'm wrong. "I'm sorry about the other night—"

"Hold up." He chuckles. Leaning forward, he grabs my hand. "Don't apologize." His expression deepens to determination as he squeezes my hand. "You came to the right place. In fact, it's the only place you need to come when you're looking to get what you wanted."

"But you shut the door in my face." He's so fucking unclear!

"Yeah, and believe me, it took everything for me to turn you away." He looks down at our hands, and easily runs a thumb across my fingers. I think that I stopped breathing; Jax holding my hand and caressing it, well, it's stimulating. "But the first time I fuck you, Em," his eyes lift to mine, "it's not gonna be when you're shitfaced. You're going to remember everything. Every touch, every kiss, every push and every pull, you're gonna feel it all." He stands up and still holding my hand, still holding me to his every word, he bends forward and lifts my fingers to his mouth. "And then," he brushes his lips across my fingers with his dark eyes touching me all the way to my whimsical soul, "you're going to thank Rayna too for bringing you back here, for bringing you back to me." He releases my hand and then struts his fine ass out of the café, leaving me with my mouth wide open. Damn that Jax Declan! I'm supposed to break his fine ass, but I think he's going to break my fucking heart saying shit like that.

####

####  CHAPTER NINE

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

"Jax." I feel a hand on my shoulder. "Hey, Jax, get up," Zeke says, smacking me hard.

"What the fuck!" I grit between my teeth. "Hit me again, and I'm gonna knock you out, fucker." I blink a few times, trying to adjust to the darkness as I push up on an elbow and reach for my cell on the nightstand to check the time. "What the hell, Zeke. It's four in the morning." I toss my phone on the bed and drop back onto the pillow, not in the mood for any of Zeke's shit tonight. Something fucked up always seems to happen whenever he closes the bar. "What do you want?"

"It's Slate. I went to check on him and somethin' ain't right. I jabbed him a few times, but he ain't budgin'."

"Fuck." I swing my legs around to sit up on the bed and scrub a hand over my face. Fucking Slate. I pick my jeans up from the floor and slip them on. "Did you talk to him today?"

"No. He stumbled into the bar around two. But I didn't get in the apartment until three. I had something to eat, and he wasn't around. Figured he'd gone to bed. He didn't look too good though when I saw him in the bar so thought I'd check on him before I crashed. Usually when I give him a poke, he swings at me, tells me to fuck off or something, but he ain't movin'."

"Son-of-a-bitch." I zip up my jeans, and with Zeke following close behind, I head to Slate's room. I flick on his bedroom light. He's fully clothed sprawled out on his belly in the bed. "Hey, dickhead." I smack my hand on the doorframe. "Hey!" When I get no response, I walk over, grab his shoulder, and roll him over. Mouth open, eyelids down to a slit, body lithe, his arm does a slow nose-dive off the side of the bed. Shit! Even with his eyes partially open, I get the impression he's not seeing me. I slap his cheek. "Slate." I grip his shoulders, lift him up from the mattress, and give him a hard shake. "Slate!"

"I'll go start the shower," Zeke says.

"Fuck." I lower my little bro's limp body back on the bed only to turn and find Zeke midway out the door. "We can't keep doing this shit."

"No." He shakes his head and hands, coming back in. "We're not calling 911. We'll try the shower first."

"Zeke." I glare up at him, he always fights me on this.

"Jax, you didn't see him the last time. It didn't help. It made him worse."

"Worse? Look at him. He's fucked!"

"Just help me pick him up and get him in the shower. If he doesn't come around, we'll take him to the hospital." He walks over to the bed and reaches down for Slate's legs. "If he does snap out of it then I'll stay with him. I'll see him through this. Come on, Jax," he nudges, "you know it'll kill him if he has to go back there."

"Fuck, I'm afraid it's gonna kill him if he doesn't." Against my better judgment, my knee sinks into the bed. I slip my arms under Slate's back bring them around his chest and bear hug him.

"But he was doing good," Zeke says as we lift Slate's dead weight. "Ya think it's 'cause Rayna's back? Think that set him off?"

"Could be." I nudge for him to watch out for the door as he moves backward. "He was pissed at me for not telling him she was in town."

Zeke's eyes widen. "He saw her?"

"Yeah, she came over the other night with Emmie Rue."

"Emmie Rue," he glances behind him, as we carry Slate into the bathroom, "ya hittin' that sweet ass yet, buttercup?"

"Shut up, fucker," I grunt, lowering Slate into the tub.

"Damn, he's heavy." Zeke leans forward, grips the faucet handle, and rests his forehead on his tatted arm. He looks up at me. "Does Rayna know about him?"

"I didn't say anything."

"Maybe you should. He loved her hard, dude."

"That was years ago." I shake my head. "He's not her problem. He's ours."

"I guess." He picks his head up. "You ready?"

I bend down. "Yeah, you?"

He nods, turns the water on, and then grabs Slate's shoulders. The cold water blasts out of the showerhead. Damn, that shit's cold. It takes a second or two, but when it hits Slate, like every other time, he comes up arms swinging. And the little dickhead is strong. Whenever he gets like this, it takes both Zeke and me to control his ass. I grab his legs and Zeke manages his upper body so he doesn't hurt himself as he comes to.

"Get the fuck off!" His arms thrash. "Don't fucking touch me!" He fights, legs kicking, body violently whipping around in the confines of the tub.

"Calm your ass down and we'll let you go," Zeke barks over the rushing water of the shower.

"Fuck you," Slate spats, water gurgling in every word. He pushes Zeke's hands off him and glares down at me, wiping the water from his face. "Fuck, Jax." He kicks at me. "Get off, motherfucker!"

"You okay," I say loosening my grip, watching him closely before finally letting go.

"Yeah, I'm fucking _okay_." He grabs the edge of the tub and pulls himself out of it, hitting the ceramic tile floor. He rolls over onto his back. "Fuck assholes, what the fuck!" He grabs the sides of his head.

"Sorry, dickhead," I say, staring down at him, "but we couldn't wake your ass up."

He closes his eyes, shutting me out as usual. "Then maybe, fuckers, you should've just let me sleep."

I want to reach down, scoop his ass up from the floor, and beat the living shit out of him. He pisses me off so bad. He's letting his life go to hell. "Fuck this shit." I turn to Zeke. "He's all yours."

I leave and head for my bedroom. Slate's killing me. I don't know what to do with him. Along with countless visits to the ER from overdoses, we got him in rehab a few times. He gets clean for a few days, once even for a few months, but then the dickhead's back to using. I know he's been through hell, but it's as if he likes it there because he just keeps going back. The counselors keep telling me that you can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. But he's my little brother. I've been saving him his entire life. Even if I wanted to, I can't stop trying now.

I'm beat though, tired of being the big brother, the babysitter, and the parent. Hell, I'm thirty, and they're both fucking adults now. I shouldn't have to deal with this shit anymore.

I sit down on my bed in the dark and hear a door slam followed by the little fucker's yelling at each other. I take a few deep breaths, but it doesn't help. The fighting escalates outside of my room. I give in to my anger. I jump up, grab the lamp on my nightstand, and slam it against the wall. But fuck, that shit doesn't help either.

I stalk out of my room. They're in the kitchen, fists clenched, standing face-to-face, and shouting at each other.

"Hey," I yell, hard and loud. And damn, it still works. They both stop and look at me.

"Dickhead here thinks he's leaving," Zeke rushes out.

"Fuck you." Slate jabs Zeke in the chest.

I walk over to Slate, grab his wet shirt and pull him close. "You ain't fucking going nowhere. You're stayin' right here, and Zeke is stayin' right by your side. That's the only reason your ass isn't at the hospital right now. Zeke saved you from that."

"Fuck off." He goes to push me, but I catch his arm and clamp down hard.

And I know how much he hates being touched so I'm ready for his other arm. It comes at me, and I catch that, too. He might be strong when he's coming out of a high from a dose of freezing water, but I'll still beat his ass down and he knows it. "What? You want next time for one of us to find you dead in that fucking bed. You want to put Zeke through that shit." I release his arms. "Get it together, Slate." I shove him away from me.

Slate glances at Zeke, and I know he doesn't want to hurt him. "I took a fucking sleeping pill, that's why you couldn't wake me up."

"Yeah, right," I snort. Three years ago, I mighta believed him, but now. He's full of nothin' but shit.

"Fuck you." Slate shoots me a look, knowing I'm not about to fall for any of his bullshit. He takes a step toward me. My hands ball into tight fists and my shoulders lift.

"Come on, Slate, let's go hang in the den," Zeke says, trying to level the battlefield before it has a chance to build. "We'll watch TV, or if you're feelin' up to it, I'll kick your ass in Grand Theft Auto."

I wait, hands clenched. It wouldn't be the first time Slate's challenged me. The last time we went at it, I ended up with a black eye, and he couldn't fight for a couple months due to a few cracked ribs. I know all his moves. Hell, I taught them to him.

"Kick my ass?" Slate turns to Zeke with a weak devious grin. "Shit, let me get out of these wet clothes, and we'll see whose fucking ass gets a whoopin'," he says and walks to his bedroom without giving me another glance.

My hands relax and shoulders drop. I blow out hard, glad it went down the way it did. I hate fighting with my brothers.

"See, he's all right, was just a sleepin' pill," Zeke says. "I'm gonna go change, too."

"You keep an eye on him," I call after Zeke as he capers off.

"Sure thing, pops." He chuckles before disappearing down the hall.

I stand in the kitchen for a few seconds, exhausted and feeling like shit. I spot my keys on the counter. Fuck it.

I need her.

I grab my keys and head out the door.

####

####  CHAPTER TEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I roll over in bed hearing _Private Eyes_. It's playing in my dreams. I love that song. But I like the remake by _Sleeping At Last_ better. I wrap my arms around the pillow. The music stops, then it starts all over again. Shit! I jump up searching through the darkness for my phone. It's somewhere in bed with me. Yeah, I've been keeping it close waiting for Jax's call. I made _Private Eyes_ the ring tone for people not in my contacts. I spot the light through the sheet. I scatter to get it. I hope it's him. I squint to read the time. God, if it is, why's he calling me now?

I swipe the screen. "Do you know what time it is," I say. Regardless of who is calling me, it's the middle of the night.

"Yeah, sorry about that," Jax's husky voice says through the line as if he's right here with me in my bed. It goes silent, but that's okay. I'm still trying to wake up, still trying to grasp that this isn't a dream. He finally called.

"So," I fall back on the bed, "what's up with the late-night call?"

The silence runs on for another moment then the only sound I hear is his deep voice. "I want to sleep with you."

"What?" My heart stops mid-beat, and I sit straight up again. "Now? It's four-thirty in the morning!"

"Yes, I know."

"But, ah," I bite my lip.

"Yes or no, Em. It's an easy enough question to answer," he says. Damn him and his pretentious tone.

I pick at the sheet. Shit, what to do? Stay strong. Don't give in. Make him wait just as he made you wait. "I'm in bed."

"I assumed as much, but I want you in mine. Yes or no, Em," he says, and again, I feel him beside me, tempting me with those near black eyes.

"Yes." I'm hopeless when it comes to Jax Declan. Just fucking hopeless. He can have me anytime he wants. He knows it. But, I didn't think he'd abuse it by getting my ass out of bed in the middle of the night for a booty call. "Give me a few, and I'll head on over."

"I'm outside in my truck. Come out when you're ready."

"You're here." I jump out of bed, tread to the window, and pull the curtain back. Sure as shit, he's out there.

"Now what kind of gentleman would I be to wake you in the middle of the night, tell you I want to sleep with you, and then expect you to come to me?"

"Oh." I close the curtain, walk over to my dresser, and pull out a pair of sweat shorts. "I'm learning real fast that you're no gentleman, Jax Declan."

"And I'm learning real fast that you like me better that way, princess. Now get your ass out here," he says, and the line goes dead.

Dammit. Why, when he says things like that, does it make me want to fuck the shit out of him? I yank on my shorts, head to the bathroom to wash up, brush my teeth, and I'm out the door in five minutes flat. I would've liked to make him wait longer, but I'm anxious to see him.

I pull the truck door open, and his masculine scent rushes into me. He doesn't have a shirt on. The street lights dance tauntingly upon his tatts and muscles. Muscles that are going to be under my hands very shortly. My heart skips a beat, and that strong beat ends right between my legs, exactly where I want his mouth. His hair is damp, and his black eyes glisten like the night, dark and dangerous. He watches me climb in and waits for me to shut the door.

"Buckle up." He turns to the road and puts the truck in drive.

He doesn't say anything. Not a single word for the whole five minutes it takes to get to his place. He parks, gets out of the truck, and I follow him inside the apartment.

Like him, it's dark and quiet.

He takes my hand, and this handholding thing really does some crazy shit to me. Our skin clinging together, the connection feels absolute. I can only image what's going to happen when we get into his bedroom. When we're naked and joined as one. My heart flutters and shit, my palms start to sweat. Oh God! Can he feel it?

He guides me down a hall until we reach what I can only assume is his bedroom. He releases my hand, waits for me to enter, and then closes the door. He flicks the light on. There's a dresser with nightstands on either side of a huge unmade king-size bed. The room is neat and clean, all except for a broken lamp on the floor. His eyes flash to the lamp then back to me, and that's when I see the stress etched into his beautiful face.

"What happened?" I take a step toward him, but he turns away from me and walks over to the dresser.

He pulls his phone from the pocket of his jeans and sets it on the dresser. "Take your clothes off and get in the bed," he says with his back to me, voice deep and demanding, like when we were in that dark room at the bar.

So it's gonna go down like this. He's obviously in that dominant, do as I say mode. I can deal. It's hot. It never turned me on before when a guy tried to order me around, but when Jax does it, all I want to do is comply. With shaky hands, I strip my clothes off and get on the bed. It's like jumping into a cloud of Jax, soft, resilient, and it smells of Heaven.

"Get under the sheet," he says as he walks over toward the light switch.

Watching his strong form move across the room, jeans low on his hips, smooth muscles rippling upon his broad back, a savage animal ready to attack, I eagerly obey and cover myself. The light flicks off, and his massive shadowy figure moves toward the bed. I hear his zipper break apart. My body ignites with anticipation. The metal button of his jeans hits the hardwood floor. My pussy cries a little knowing his pants are off, knowing he's finally coming for me. The bed sinks from the weight of his body as he comes in for the kill. My kill, and I hold my breath preparing for the attack. I'm ready. Hell, I've been ready and waiting for years.

"Roll on your side, away from me," he says not as demandingly.

Okay... not the kind of attack I was expecting, but I'll submit. I turn from him. His arm comes around my waist and he pulls my naked body against him. He's hard in the right places, soft in others, and warm all over. So warm. His lips brush up my nape, and my flesh undulates with heat. He presses a light kiss upon my skin before his head settles between my shoulder and neck. He holds me, just lays there and holds me. My nipples harden. I'm so wet. My body aches for him, but he doesn't make a move. His hands don't wander, he just holds me.

"Ah, Jax," I run my fingers along his muscular arm, "do you...are we going to..."

"No, we're not. I told you before, your body is meant for other things, and one of those things is to comfort a man when he needs it."

Comfort? Jax is full of wonders, considering I'm naked and in his arms for the first time. Whatever's going on with him, it must have something to do with the broken lamp on the floor. "Jax, are you okay?"

"I am now, Em." He kisses me on the neck and settles back in.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"So, when you said you wanted to sleep with me, you meant just that?"

"Yeah, I had a shitty night. And I know it was selfish to wake you up because of it, but I needed to see you." His arm tightens around my body. "But I'm fucking tired, and all I want right now is to have you like this."

"I think you know you can have me any way you want, Jax," I say the absolute truth. I'm not ashamed of it. I'm right where I want to be in the arms of the only man I ever wanted.

"And I plan to take you in all the ways I desire, princess. Just not tonight," he whispers into my ear and then nuzzles his soft whiskers back into the nook of my shoulder. "Now," he kisses my exposed flesh again, "go to sleep."

I clutch the blanket of security of his warm skin and close my eyes. It takes a while for the questions running through my head—what could have happened, what made Jax need my comfort—to settle down. His soft, shallow breaths feathering my skin and his relaxed, heavy body resting on mine tell me that he's fallen asleep. So, I give into his comfort. I finally relax. And I too drift off to sleep.

I wake to the sun in my eyes, the smell of Jax under my nose, and a heavy arm around my waist. I'm facing him, and he's still in that deep sleep. Other than complete tranquility, his face is absent of any expression. I lay gazing at his perfection. His strong jaw, full lips, thick neck, and tanned skin that covers layers of muscles.

He's a breath stealer, a thought hog, and a pussy nagger. He consumes my ability to think, and with every look, every damn word he teases my raging womanly desires.

My hand burns to reach out and touch him, but I don't want to wake him. I went to bed at eleven and, up until he woke me, I was sound asleep. Whatever went down last night obviously exhausted him, and he needs his rest. And sure, it's driving me crazy not knowing what happened, what caused him to come seeking my comfort, but if he wanted me to know then he would've told me.

He's full of secrets. Ones I get the feeling he's been keeping for years. Ones he's kept hidden from me. And I want to know them all. I want him to trust me. I want him to...Oh, shit. I think I'm surpassing the teasing stage of this relationship. I just might be falling for Jax Declan. I mean, I've always wanted him to notice me, but now that he's looking, there's more to it. There's more to him. He's not a challenge. He's not the hot Declan brother I want to break. He's a man that, given some time, I could find myself falling for.

I need to get out of here. I have to get a handle on what I'm feeling. And I can't go through another rejection right now. I'm not sure if he's fucking with me, but this not giving in to us, this shit needs to end. I don't know what he's holding out for, why he doesn't just surrender and have sex with me. It's destined. If we continue down this road, it's going to happen; there's no way around it.

I gently remove his arm from my body and slowly slide out of the bed. He rolls onto his back, his arms lift and his hands curl, then they relax and slumber back into the mattress above his head. I stare down at him. He's mesmeric. When I look at him, he takes me to this place, a place deep inside where we only belong. And it scares me.

Pulling myself away from the Herculean all sprawled out on the bed, I grab my clothes, quickly dress and tiptoe out of the room. I pass by a door and glance inside. Zeke's sleeping in a chair and next to him in the bed, someone's under the blankets. All I see is the back of a head, and it looks like it could be Slate. That's strange. I shake my head and continue to the door.

In no time, I'm walking through the door of Rayna's sister's. Rayna comes strolling out of the kitchen in a long t-shirt, hair in a messy updo with a mug in her hand, and a huge knowing smile on her face.

I drop into the sofa.

"Here," she places the coffee down on the table in front of me. "I gotta feeling you need this more than I do. I'll go get another, and when I get back," she points a finger at me, "I want to hear all about it."

I smirk at her, palm the mug in my hands. I lift it and take a much-needed sip as Rayna leaves the room. Shit. I forget she takes sugar in hers. I put it back down.

"So," she capers back in and sits beside me on the sofa, "I take it you were with Jax."

"Yeah." I push the strands of hair hanging in my face behind my ear.

"And?"

"And we slept together, and when I say slept, that's exactly what I mean."

Her lips pucker, forehead wrinkles, and head tilts. "Like, no sex slept?"

I slowly nod my head. "He woke me up at four-thirty in the morning so he could," I quote with my fingers, "sleep with me."

"Huh," she picks up her coffee and takes a sip. "That's kinda," she holds the mug close to her mouth, "sweet."

"Right," I say slouching back into the cushion. "I don't get him. One day, he's saying all these wicked naughty things to me in a dark room, and the next he's holding me naked while we sleep."

"Hold up," her hand comes out as she nearly spits out her coffee. "You were naked in bed with him, and he didn't touch you?"

"Yes." I nod again. "Completely naked."

"Damn, that boy's got some discipline. I'm mean, how many guys do you know who would or could do that?"

"None."

"Exactly." Rayna looks at me. "I always wondered what he'd be like. Ya know, to see him in a relationship. He was the mature one, the responsible one. Even though he's only two years older than Slate, he seemed to hold down the fort in the Declan home. Even when Grams was around, everything had to go through Jax. Don't get me wrong, he was always nice, but I gotta say, he was a bit intimidating."

"I think that's what I liked about him...that quiet reserve. A lot of guys are so cocky, full of themselves and such jerks, but Jax, as hot as he was, he never threw it around."

"Ya, I get what you're saying. So what are you going to do?"

I stand up, Jax's scent still clinging to me, and look down at Rayna. "I'm going to try to break him before he breaks me."

Her brow rises. "Do you have feelings for him? I mean, aside from wanting to fuck him?"

"I don't know." I set my hands on my hips. "He's so confusing. He makes me think he wants me, almost as if he's always wanted me, but I know that can't be true. If he would've just showed some interest all those years ago, I'm sure he knows that he could have had me."

"Slate never mentioned anything to me, but then again, Jax did always look at you longer than a guy who's _not_ interested should."

"No, he didn't."

"Ah, ya he did, always when you weren't looking, but I kept it to myself. As I said, he scared me. And if I was wrong, well, I didn't want Slate's big brother angry with me. Besides, I didn't want to give you any false hope. I knew you had a huge crush on him."

"I did, but now I got a big girl crush on him. If he starts to show interest after all these years, I don't know what the hell I'm going to do. This was supposed to be fun, breaking the Declan brothers. But Rayna," I toss my hand out in there, "Jax Declan, he could be the first guy to break me."

"Oh, Emmie." She gets up and gives me a hug. "I'm sorry for making you come back here."

"Don't be." I pull back and smile at her, remembering what Jax said in the café. That maybe I'd thank Rayna too for bringing me back to him. Depending how all this turns out, he could be right. "I'm okay. I'm glad that we came back. I'm worried about you, though. Besides the other night, have you seen Slate at all?"

"No, and I'm not sure that I want to." She drops back down onto the sofa.

"I get it, but I think deep down you know that you need to. You guys had something special, and no matter how it ended, you still had that."

"He fights, Emmie. Fights! Can you see my Slate doing what Jax was doing the other night in that cage? And you heard what Melody said, Slate brings in the biggest crowd. So, he's gotta be good. Right?"

"Jax says he's changed."

"What? How?"

"He didn't say, just said he changed." I lean forward and pick up my mug.

She stares at me. "That's it." She shakes her hands. "I don't wanna see him."

"Yes, you do." I grin as I turn and head to the kitchen for a decent cup of java.

"Dammit!" I hear Rayna say a few times while I pour the coffee.

I enter the living room, and Lurlene comes slumbering in, hair all around her lightly freckled face. She's rubbing her eyes and says between a yawn, "Mornin'."

"Coffee's on in the kitchen," I say passing by her.

"Thanks." She makes a beeline for it.

"So," I settle back down next to Rayna, "what's on the schedule for today?" I ask the party planner, trying to steer the conversation away from Slate. She'd never admit it, but I know it makes her upset.

"Well," she looks at me from the corner of her eye, "I have an interview today, so I'm not sure what you ladies—"

"An interview!" Lurlene stops in the kitchen doorway, holding her coffee with her mouth dropped open. "I knew it," she shakes her head as she comes into the room. "I remember you mentioning some job a couple months back in Santa Fe, but I didn't put two and two together until just now. You wanted to come here for a damn job interview?"

"No. I wanted to spend the summer with my two best friends. And besides, they had filled that position. But when I was on the hunt last week, I noticed it was back up. I guess the person they hired didn't work out."

"What's it for," I ask. Rayna went to school to be a social worker, but her career has taken a few turns.

"Same as what I did when I worked for David, mediator for a divorce lawyer."

"And what are you gonna do? Move back here?" She can't leave me in Manhattan. She's the only reason I'm there.

"No. Right now, all I'm going to do is go check it out. I loved working as a mediator, and there aren't many jobs out there for it."

"Well," I turn to Lurlene, "what's on your agenda for today?"

"Think I might finally give that Zeke Declan a call." She grins.

"What?" Rayna and I say at the same time.

"I don't know about you, ladies, but I'm on task. I've accomplished breaking Zeke Declan's first rule already."

"You broke the ' _Don't call me, I'll call you_ ' rule," Rayna says. "You really have his number, and he's waiting for _your_ call?"

"Yes," she picks up her mug, "that boy's been waiting now for three days."

"Holy shit," I say, hearing my phone chime a text. I get up and check it. And those huge letters, JAX, on the screen weaken my knees. I click to open the text.

Meet me at JZS's tonight. I get off around ten.

####

####  CHAPTER ELEVEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

I slide the draft beers across the bar, take the money, and spin around. I grab my cell from my pocket, toss the cash in the till, and check the time, nine-thirty. Shit, I hope Em shows. She never did respond to my text, and she was gone when I woke up this morning, both not good signs.

"Hey," Rusty bumps me on the shoulder. "See who's here," she nudges to the left.

I slip my cell back in my pocket and look. Fuck. Lisa.

"It's been awhile since she's been in here," Rusty says, sticking a few bills in the register.

"Motherfucker, I don't need this shit tonight." I run a hand through my hair.

Rusty's eyes snap to me. "Please tell me you didn't fuck that?"

A few months back during a dry spell, I met her at a bar in Galveston, and yep, I sure the hell did. I wished that I hadn't, though. I like it rough, like kinky, like dirty, but that bitch, she's just wrong. She wanted me to do things to her that made even me shrill. To top it off, after I fucked her, she got all clingy. And I'm usually a good judge when it comes to picking out the discreet ones, but that crazy chick sure had me fooled. It took me weeks to get rid of her.

"Jax," Rusty smacks me on the arm, "you did." 'Cause I make it a point never to kiss and tell, I only offer Rusty a short grimace. "Shit! That's why she kept coming around, and here I thought she was after Zeke. All right," she pats me on the chest, "you go down to the basement and get a bottle of Jack Daniels. We're all out. And I'll try to get rid of her."

Lisa's my problem, not Rusty's, but the clock's a-tickin'. I got a feeling that crazy bitch will cause nothing but problems when, or if, Em shows up.

"Thanks." I kiss Rusty on the cheek and head toward the back. Rusty has sort of taken over Slate's job at the bar. She covers if Zeke or I can't be here. She's the only one we trust. Granted, it took Zeke a year to accept that he wasn't getting in her pants. He tried, even though he doesn't have the right junk in his trunks. Like Zeke and I, Rusty's into chicks. Once Zeke got it, they became friends, and now he has someone to check out the chicks with. I'm not into all that shit. If I'm into a girl, the only person who needs to know is that girl.

I make it to the basement, find the whiskey, and head back up the stairs. I come behind the bar, spot Lisa still sitting at the bar, her dark brown eyes burning into me. I glance at Rusty. She lifts her hands and mouths a "Sorry."

I check my cell again. Fuck. I walk around the bar and stop in front of Lisa. "I told you, you're not allowed in here."

She spins around in the barstool to face me. Her fake jet-black hair swinging with her, she places a hand on my stomach. "You miss me, Jax."

"No." I grab her wrist and remove her hand from my body. "I don't." I take a step back and pull her off the stool. "It's time for you to go." I drag her toward the door. I've learned, it's the way ya gotta treat her, to the point and downright cruel. But even then, I think the crazy bitch likes it.

Just as we make it to the front, she yanks her hand from me and backs up against the wall.

"Lisa, we talked about this," I warn.

She reaches out and grabs my shirt, pulling me hard against her. I get a whiff of alcohol mixed with that nauseous perfume she wears. "You want me, Jax," she licks her lips. "You know you do."

I glare down at her, cursing myself for this bad fucking call. "It was a one-time thing. That's it. I don't fucking want you. I don't want you here. And I don't ever want to see you again. I explained this all before."

Her hand slips around my neck. She tips up and kisses me. "What the fuck!" I push her away, wipe my mouth, and turn. Fuck! My eyes clash right into Em's. My entire body goes numb.

Em smiles at me, flicks her brows, and then she surprises the shit out of me. She doesn't turn around and bolt out the door. She heads for the bar. I watch her get up on a stool and order a drink from Rusty all while Lisa's still pawing at me. I grab Lisa's wrist and drag her out the door. We get outside, and I let her go. She stumbles back in her heels, looking injured.

"Leave, Lisa," I point out to the parking lot. "And don't ever come back. Do you hear me?"

"But Jax..." She takes a few steps toward me.

"I swear to God if you don't get the fuck out of here right now." I clench my fists. I've hit a girl before but never to cause bodily harm. Ever. But, fuck, she's gotta see she's pushing me.

"Okay." She stomps a heel hard into the ground. "Fine! Fuck you." She readjusts her purse onto her shoulder and fucking finally, she walks away.

I wait for her to get in her car and leave before I release my balled fists.

Now to deal with Em.

This was not how tonight was supposed to go. I planned on having a few drinks with my girl, teasing her a bit, and then taking her back to my place and making her mine, physically. For in all other matters, she already belongs to me. Emmie Rue has been mine since my eyes accepted her as a woman and not a little girl. Even then, besides the few years' difference, I knew that I couldn't take her. I had to work on my aggression, and she needed to understand that she wasn't just a pretty face. She had a whole lot more to offer.

I jerk the door open and walk in. Em's still sitting at the bar, sipping on a beer and talking with Rusty. Now that the fight has started, the front bar has cleared out; just a few customers linger at a table in the far corner of the room.

"I was just telling your friend, Emmie here," Rusty says with an easy-to-read smile, "that your groupies are such a pain in the ass."

I grin at Rusty. I haven't told her about Em, but that girl doesn't miss a thing. She must've seen me talking with Em the other night, and considering I don't philander with the ladies at JZS's, she put two and two together.

"Hey, Em," I say, walking behind the bar, my eyes not leaving hers.

"Jax," she offers me a tight smile. I sense she's not buying Rusty's excuse for Lisa. But, hell, she's still here.

"Well," Rusty drops the towel draped over her shoulder onto the bar, "think I'm gonna check to see if the ladies need anything in the back room before you head out. Nice meeting you, Em."

"You, too," Em's eyes shift from me to Rusty and her smile softens. "I like her," she says when Rusty clears the room.

"So do I. Hired her two years ago, and I'm not sure what we'd do without her." I gaze at her. "I'm glad you came."

"Yeah, but I'm not sure your groupie's too happy about it."

"She means nothing—"

"I told you before I'm not really the jealous type."

"You shouldn't be." I reach out and take her small stubborn chin between my fingers. "You know what you are, don't you?"

"No, Jax." Her eyes sparkle like an envious blue moon. "What am I?"

"You're my beautiful Em."

"Yours. Really? And what makes you think that?"

"Hey," I hear to the right of my ear.

"Yeah?" I shoot my eyes to a patron across the bar, wanting nothing more than to tell him to fuck off.

"Can I get a Guinness?"

"Sure. I'll bring it on over to your table."

"Thanks, dude."

I nod. "Guess I better get his beer."

"Yeah," her pretty lips quirk, "we can finish our conversation a little later."

"Sure, this Guinness is gonna take a few to pour anyway." I grab a glass from under the counter.

"Why? Is there some kind of technique to pouring beer now?"

"With a Guinness, yeah, it takes a patient hand." I place the glass beneath the spout.

"How so?"

"First, you have to tilt the glass at a 45 degree level, fill it halfway, and then," I set the glass of dark beer and foam on the counter, "you wait for it to settle."

"How long do you have to wait?"

"Until it relaxes." I rest my hands on the bar, "but I'm a patient man, Em," I look into her eyes, "and I know how to wait for things, especially when it comes to the things that I want."

"And," she sets her chin into the palm of her hand, "just what do you want?"

I smile and glance at the glass. "Time for the next step." I pick the glass up. "Now, you place the tap directly over the middle of the foam and slowly fill it to the top." I watch the beer but feel Em's eyes on me. "There," I set it again on the bar.

"It's ready?"

"It looks like it, but no," I grin at her, "and no matter how thirsty you are for it, if you want to really enjoy it, you have to wait just a little longer."

"I can't wait any longer, Jax," she says, and I get the notion that she's not talking about the Guinness.

"What are you sayin'? You relaxed and settled, Em?"

"Yes."

"Then you're not ready? Like this beer, even after all its preparation, there's more to come." I pick up the glass and walk around the bar.

She places her hand on my arm. "What's left besides drinking it?"

"You don't merely drink it." I lean down. "You wrap your hand around it, slide your thumb along all its wetness, pick it up, and then you take your time, sipping, tasting, swallowing, and absorbing every fucking delicious bit of it. And even after it's gone from the glass, it's not finished with you yet. It's gonna run all through your veins, making your body tingle all over, and leaving you wanting more."

"Stop fucking with me, Jax." She lets go of my arm.

"Oh, princess, I haven't begun to fuck with you yet," I smile and walk over to the guy to give him his Guinness.

####

####  CHAPTER TWELVE

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I watch Jax walk away. When I got his text, I thought about not coming. He's controlled this relationship for far too long. Teasing me, denying me, and confusing me. Still, when he says, I'm beautiful, damn if I don't fall right for it. A part of me wants to believe that he's interested in seeing where this goes, too.

He obviously doesn't want anything to do with the woman he was talking to when I walked in the bar. That whole relationship seems more like a stalker syndrome to me. I heard what he said to her. I almost felt sorry for her, yet in the same instant, I wanted to scratch her eyes out when I saw them kissing. It's not as if I have some kind of right to Jax. No matter how bad I want him, he doesn't belong to me.

Tonight, though, I'm going to push him. Tonight, he will be mine.

Rusty comes up, carrying a few empty bottles. "Ew, Guinness. I hate when someone orders that, takes forever to pour." I hear the glass clink as she drops the bottles behind the bar. She smiles at me then turns to Jax, who's now at my side. "I'll take over from here."

"Thanks, Rusty," Jax says and looks down at me. "Wanna stick around, watch the fight, and have another beer with me?"

"Sure," I say, 'cause I'm not going anywhere until I get what I want.

"Here ya go," Rusty sets two beers on the bar. "It's on the house." She winks at me. "I don't think the boss will mind."

"Thanks." I grab my beer and follow Jax into the back room. The music blares with the lights dimmed low all accept the ones over the cage where people gather around and shout for a winner. I don't want to watch the fight. I don't want to drink a beer. I want to start pushing. "So, Jax. What's going on here?" He continues through the bar. "Jax." I grab his arm.

"What?" He looks down at me from over his shoulder.

"What's happening here?"

His eyebrows gather. "I thought we were gonna watch the fight."

"No. What's going on between you and me?"

"Em," his head tilts as he turns to face me, "you know what's going on here."

"No. I don't." I gaze up at him. "You haven't even kissed me yet."

"You want to do this right now?" His forehead creases. "Do you need some kind of validation? Need a show, Em. You feel the need to show this entire room what's happing here."

"No." I get he's a reserved man, and he's not about public display. "Just stop fucking with me, messing with my head, playing games. I don't care who knows about us. All I want to know is what you want."

"Fuck," he throws a hand in the air and starts to walk away. Apparently, my push works, but it's pushing him away!

"Jax!"

He turns and sets his beer on some random table he passes. A few long strides brings him back to me. He grabs my arms and pulls me against his hard body. "This is not how tonight was supposed to go down," he rasps. "Just have a little patience, princess."

"First, tell me what you want." I lift my chin. "It's an easy enough question to answer." I throw his words back at him from the other night.

"What I want." He bends down closer, eyes scanning my face as though he's contemplating saying the answer. "Em," he breathes out my name, hands tightening on my arms, "what I ever only wanted," his mouth is now nearly touching mine, "is you." He leans in and our lips finally meet. Everything around us stops. The shouting audience, the grunts and smacks coming from the cage, and the music, it all deafens. Even the blood in my veins still, all that exists is Jax's unrestricted mouth on mine.

"Fuck, Em." He pulls back from the kiss, eyes dark and unreadable. "Let's go." He grabs my hand and proceeds to pull me along with him to the back door.

"Where are we going?"

"To my place." He yanks the door open.

"Why?"

"To fuck," he says, voice hard as steel. Face determined. He struts down the hall pulling me along with him. I'm not about to argue. This is what I want. Still when we arrive at the door, my nerves start to claw from the inside out. He takes out his keys, unlocks the door, and guides me through the back way to his room. He lets go of my hand. I enter, dragging my damaged nerves with me. He follows behind, slamming the door closed. His hand lands on my chest. He pushes me. I hit the wall. His chest rises and falls as he gazes down at me.

He sets a hand on the wall to the left of me. "I was gonna do this right, Em." He places his other hand to the right of me, trapping me. "We were gonna have a couple beers. I'd flirt with you, and I'd let you tease me, just as you've been doing for years. Then after we played your game, I'd bring you back here, and I'd go slow, taking what I want." His hands slip to my shoulders. "But, now," he grips my shirt. "Now, I'm going to take you the way I want." He yanks my top down and gathers my shirt in his hands. It tightens around my waist, trapping my arms to my sides. With his other hand, he pulls my tits out of my bra. His palm slips beneath my heavy breast and his thumb runs gently over my dimpled flesh. Damn him and that precise thumb. "Now, we're gonna play the way I like." His hand flips up and the tips of his fingers strike my breast. Oh shit, I was not expecting that. I cry out from the sting and the surprising pleasure of it. "And when I get through with you," he lightly taps my stinging nipple again, "not only will my mark be all over your beautiful body," he grabs my chin, tilts my head back, and glares down at me, "it'll also be deep inside of you." He kisses me with the same aggression of his touch, and every part of me shakes with expectancy. His fingers pluck my sore nipple as he devours my lips, his hot tongue thrashing violently with mine.

He draws back, jaw clenched, eyes wild with desire. They scrape to my neck, past my shoulders to my aching breasts. "Fuck, Em." He pats my nipple with his fingers. "You are fucking beautiful." His hand comes down quick and hard on my breast. My back arches, pressing closer for his red-hot touch. "Oh, ya like that?" He taps me again, but I'm still trying to catch each breath as my body trembles for him. "Answer me." His hand flips, striking my other breast.

"Yes," I cry out. I flinch when his firm hand slaps me harder. "Oh, God, it feels good."

"Princess, I'm gonna make you feel good all over." He releases my shirt and steps back. "Take your clothes off." Without a lick of hesitance, I strip the material free from my burning skin. Beneath hooded eyes, he quietly watches, and patiently waits. "Back against the wall, spread your legs," he says. Pulling his shirt off, he tosses it on the floor.

Damn! The muscles of his chest, the tightness of his abdomen, and the tatts—he's pure perfection. My heartbeat thrashes beneath my throbbing breasts as I again do as I'm told.

"Don't move unless you're asked." He moves in, those dark eyes keeping me firmly in my place. His hand lifts, and then it comes down hard on my surging breast. I love the feel of his strength. The relentless bite on my flesh charges me, makes me want more.

"Fuck, Jax!" His hand lifts again, my body stiffens, but he doesn't strike me this time. He scoops my breast into his warm firm palm and gently squeezes. His head bends downward toward my engorged tip. He gazes up at me from beneath the lids of those sinfully dark eyes as his mouth covers my ripe nipple. His heavy lids lower and a growl vibrates from his lips. He suckles and bites my heated tip, all the while rasping softly against my tingling skin.

Rough kisses score up my body, finally making it to my mouth just as his hand moves between my legs. Fuck, he's making me want him so bad. Right now, I'd let him do anything to me. He arches away from the kiss and gazes at me for a few quiet seconds. "Tell me, Em, have you been a good girl?"

I know what he's asking. "Yes."

His fingers slip a little high up between my thighs, and he stops. "You haven't played with yourself?"

"No." God, I need him to touch my pussy. "I waited for you."

A sexy smile touches his lips. "Good girl." His hands move to my wrists. "Spread yourself wide so I can see what _I've_ waited for."

His eyes stay on mine as he guides my hands downward and holds them so I can again do as instructed. I open my lower lips for him. I'm wet as hell. His head shifts back and he glances down at my hands as a small smile curves his full lips. "You're dripping." The tips of his fingers glide slowly over my exposed flesh. They slide all the way to my ass. I feel the pressure of his fingers at my taut entrance before he comes back to my pussy. Damn, that little tease was exhilarating. I can't hold back another long-winded cry. "Ah, like your ass played with. That's good." His finger enters my pussy hard and fast, and I release another whimper. "Like the rest of you, I'll be taking that eventually, too." Holy shit is he really talking about fucking me in the ass. His eyes flash to me. "Ah, I see you're a little nervous about that?" I nod, biting my bottom lip, still a bit shamefully curious. "That's good. It tells me that no one else has given you that pleasure yet." His thumb rubs lightly over the hood of my clit. "Don't worry, I'll be gentle at first when it comes to that," he says, stroking me to oblivion. "But, right now," his finger pulls out from me, and the touch of his thumb disappears, "I want to play with your pussy," he says, lightly tapping it a couple times.

"Shit," I hiss as my hands pull me further open. Damn. I think I want him to keep doing that. And the more I make those pathetic moans, he does; he spanks my pussy that much harder.

"Fuck, Em." He grabs my hands and turns me around. His body presses against my back as he crushes me to the wall, and being anywhere, trapped by him, is so hot. "I can't take it anymore." His breath sears my neck. "I need to give that ass a proper spanking." The weight of his body vanishes. "Push it out for me."

"Like this?" I press my palms into the wall, and I sway my hips back, wanting it.

"Yes. Fuck, princess. Your ass is fucking perfect." I hear him moving behind me then I see his jeans drop to the floor. There's a tearing sound behind me. I think he's putting on a condom. My hips rotate. "Stay still," he grunts. My heart races as I wait for him to spank me, fuck me. Really, I don't care what he does to my body just as long as he does something.

His firm hand comes down hard on my ass. The sound of it coupled with his low growl slices my surrender wide open. I push my ass out. "I told you to stay still." He strikes my ass again. He waits a second and then his hand slaps my tender cheek once more.

"Oh, baby," he rubs my tingling ass, "you're so red. Like that too, don't you?"

"Yes," I say, unashamed, knowing that nothing between us could be wrong.

"You want more, baby?"

"Yes." I cling to the wall, begging for more. Oh, God yes. I fucking want more. My ass is on fire, but I need him to stoke those flames. It's a raw act of possession. I want him to take me any way he wants. I can hear him behind me. Each time his hand comes down, the sounds he's making, damn, this is turning him on, too.

"Fuck, I gotta have you." He flips me back around, our eyes clash. His hard chest escalates and cascades, a violent beast in the thralls of attack. He grips the back of my thighs and lifts me. I catch his broad shoulders and cry out as his cock enters me fast and hard. Everything the man does is fast and hard, and fuck, I love it. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him as he presses deeper into me, claiming my entire being.

His hands move to my ass. His fingers dig into my hypersensitive skin. He slams me against the wall and savagely drives his cock into me. "Em," he breaks from my mouth. "Fuck, baby, you feel more amazing than I could've ever imagined. I've wanted you for so long." His aggressive hands push and pull me to and from him.

I feel every ridge of his cock, feel it pulsate inside of me. Feel him, like he's a part of me. I thrash my hips, surging down to meet his every upward thrust. My womb tightens. It hurts, that good hurt, the same hurt I felt every time his firm hand landed on my body.

Oh shit! I think I'm going to come.

Wait. What's going on here? I don't come from mere penetration. When it comes to me, it's all about the clit. Still, my body shakes threatening a blood rushing, out-of-this-world climax.

I need him so much. I need more of him. I dig my nails into his back, and that forces him harder into me. I move against him, hot, wild, and abandoned. But I can't get enough. I squeeze my arms tighter around his neck and press everything that I am closer. He deepens his violent movements. Still, I need more.

What if this is it, all he's willing to give me? Like what he had with that woman, a one-time thing? I can't have this be a one-time thing. I can't lose him. My heart's beating so hard. I fight for each breath. I feel as if I let go and give into this absolution, I'm going to break into a million pieces, and it'll be over. We'll be over. It's too much. I'm suffocating, drowning in the emotions collapsing inside of me. My body needs release. I'm so ready to come. Yet, I can't seize the words as they escape my trembling lips. "No more!"

Jax's entire body stills. Breaths heavy and uneven, his hard muscles slacken beneath me. His hands slowly move down from my ass. He scoops me up into his arms. Unable to face him, I bend my head down against his chest. I used the damn safe word, but I didn't use it because he's hurting me. I used it because I'm afraid that he might do some permanent damage to my heart. He carries me over to the bed and gently lays me on it. His eyes meet mine with such affection and affliction. He slides in beside me and pushes the hair from my face. "Okay. No more, Em." He stares down at me, a hint of unfamiliar apprehension lurking in his shadowy eyes.

I don't know why I do it, but a tear releases from the corner of my eye. I blame it on the uncontrollable emotions of our closeness. How bad I want him. How much I need him. Oh, God. It's fucking happening. I'm falling for Jax Declan. And I'm a mental wreck because of it.

He palms my cheeks, and it hurts to see him like this, so confused and bruised. I close my eyes. "I'm sorry, princess." He kisses my forehead. It just creates more tears. What's wrong with me? I'm having a damn meltdown because I'm afraid to lose him—because I want him so bad. Because I can't handle a bit of mind-blowing, awesome sex.

Well, hell. This is so not the way to keep him.

####

####  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

Fuck. She's crying. I made her fucking cry. Motherfucker! I fucked it up. Just as I feared, my brutal needs messed up things with my beautiful Em. I didn't see it coming. I watched for the signs, but the responses I got from her, dammit. She begged me for more, and I thought she was with me. I thought she accepted me. But fuck, I made her cry.

My hand shakes as I cradle the side of her face. I swallow trying to clear the lump in my throat. "I'm sorry, princess." I lean forward and gently press my lips to her forehead.

I feel her hand cover mine. I pull back, finding her glistening blue eyes. I stare down at her. Breaths erratic, I'm afraid to move. Her other hand comes toward me, and her warm palm softly rests on my cheek. I lean into it, selfishly needing her touch.

"Kiss me, Jax." She pulls me closer to her.

"Em," I say, searching her as my thumb wipes a tear from the corner of her eye.

"Please, Jax, don't say anything," she breathes. "Just kiss me." Parting her lips, she raises herself to me.

I go slow, brushing lightly over her succulent mouth. I take my time, trying to prove, not only to her, but also to myself that I'm capable of being gentle for her. I'll be anything she needs me to be.

Her hand slides up my forearm, her other hand reaches behind my neck. She deepens the kiss and a sweet moan quivers from her. Fuck, those sounds are enough to make me lose control. I remain calm though, allowing her to explore me at her pace. Whatever she needs, I'll give it to her. Her fingers trace down my neck, my chest, my abs, and fuck, my cock refills the condom still clinging to my skin.

"Touch me," she says, her words so close and warm against my ear. I turn my hand from her cheek and feather my knuckles along her silky arm. Watching her, I draw the tips of my fingers down between her breasts and linger at the soft swell of her belly. "Lower, Jax."

Keeping my eyes locked with hers, I carefully move my hand to between her legs. My cock stiffens as my fingers meet her wetness. I go slow, petting and caressing her. My heart pounds hard in my chest.

Her eyes flutter.

"More," I softly say.

"Yes, Jax," she whispers. "More." She peers up at me through hooded eyes. I find the fleshy nub nestled in the heart of all her softness, and I gently rub it. "More," she says, and her back arches. Not breaking eye contact, I lower my head and wet one lush rosy nipple with the tip of my tongue. I stroke her clit a little harder. "Yes," she hisses. Hips lifting, her body presses closer to my touch. My mouth gets greedy. I capture her nipple with my lips and suck. She grabs my hair and pulls me closer. And that's all I need. I push my finger deep inside of her. Another sweet wanton moan echoes to my ears.

My mouth slips from her nipple. Now she's watching me. I move down toward the end of the bed. I trace my finger up her ankle, lean forward and kiss the length of her slender leg. I run my lips along her thigh, making my way to the dampness between her legs. I nuzzle my nose into her musky moisture with a low growl. I gently slip my tongue over her clit. I gaze up at her and wait.

"More, Jax," she says, and I latch my lips around her clit, flicking my tongue against it. "Oh, my God!" She grabs my hair, pulling me. "Yes, more!"

I thrust a finger into her tight opening. She cries out again, and I do what I do. I lick, suck, and fuck her with my tongue. I fuck her with my fingers. And I don't stop until her body's shivering. Until she's thrashing beneath my touch. Until I hear the bittersweet sound of her release.

I crawl over her, resting my elbows beside her head, holding my body over hers, and wait for her breaths to slow down. I brush the hair back from her face, and she finally comes to. She looks up at me, eyes sparkling with satisfaction. My heart swells. "You're so beautiful, Em."

"Jax," her eyes sink right into my swelling heart, "don't stop."

"More?" I arch an eyebrow.

She wraps her legs around my hips. My cock is but a slip away from becoming one with my beautiful Em again. "I want all of you," she says.

"Princess, there's no need to want." I kiss her parted lips, shift, and ease myself slowly into her. Our bodies join, and finally, we become one. She gasps, her arms clinging to me as she calls out my name. I hold myself inside of her, absorbing her tightness and warmth. I'm sweating, trying to hold back my raging desires. I gently lure my hips back. "Shit, baby." My entire body shudders as I press back in. "You're so...fuck, you're exquisite." I ease myself back in again. Her hands move to my shoulders. My restraint dithers. I grab her hands, lift them above her head, and entwine my fingers into hers. I catch her blue eyes, full of such passion and surrender. "So fucking beautiful, princess." I kiss her, rotating my hips. Slow at first, but when she starts to grind me, pressing her hips frantically against me, she takes the last of my restraint. I grip tighter to her hands and delve deeper into her with each rhythmic push.

"Jax," her hips lift. "I'm gonna—"

"It's okay. Do it, baby," I grit between clenched teeth. "Do it, baby. I'm with you, Em. I'm right fucking here with you." I throw my head back, and the second I hear her cry, I join her, releasing years of desires. I let go of those years of craving and needing right into my beautiful Em.

Once our bodies set free their last shudder, I roll over to my side and pull all her softness against me. I wrap my arms around her and lay there listening to our rapid breaths. I wait for the calm. This moment, of having her in my arms like this, has been a long time coming.

I brush my hand over her silky hair. I do it until her breathing evens out. "You okay?" I bend down and kiss the top of her head. I feel her nod on my chest. "Listen, about before, if I got too rough—"

"Jax." She slides her hand down my arm. "I don't want to talk about that right now."

"All right," I run my fingers through her hair, "but, baby, we will have to eventually."

"We will. Just not tonight," she quietly says.

"Promise me something?"

Her head tilts back and she looks up at me. "Anything," she says. Fuck, if I don't believe her. It's in her eyes. She's mine. At least, at this moment, she's fucking mine.

"Can you promise me that when I wake up in the morning you'll still be here in my arms?"

She stares up at me, and my body goes numb. Did I just get too cocky there? Maybe I don't completely have her.

"Jax." She gently palms my cheek. "I'm not going anywhere." Her hand moves down my neck, and she nestles her face back into my chest.

####

####  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

"Mornin' beautiful." Waking to the sound of Jax's husky voice sends frissons of desire all through me. I glance up and find his dark hooded eyes waiting for me, and I smile. This time, I don't want to run. I want to stay.

I lower my head back down and gently rub my cheek against his muscular chest. I inhale his exhilarating scent and, with the hint of sex still lingering in the air, another shiver ripples down my spine.

My hand moves over his tight stomach. Drawn to his nipple, I kiss it, and I can't stop my tongue as it sneaks out for a lick. Christ, even his nipple feels good on my lips, and the taste of him, so delicious.

"Em," I hear the deep intake of his breath. "You start shit like that and we're never going to get out of this bed." He reaches for me and pulls my body up closer to him. He nuzzles my nose with his before his full lips make contact. He nibbles my bottom lip first, moves his attention to the top, then his tongue brushes across both. I curl closer, taking his mouth with such need. His arms wrap around me and he deepens the kiss.

"Princess," he breaks from me for a second, "I," he kisses me again, "make a mean breakfast."

I push up on my knees, straddling him. I grab his cheeks. "Tempting me with food?" I glare down at him. His cloaked eyes drift to my peaked nipples, and the girls love his attention. "If I didn't know any better I'd think you're trying to get me out of this bed," I say.

"Can't blame me for wanting to feed your body," he looks up, "in every way that I can."

I tilt my head. "I am hungry."

"Good," his hand taps my ass, "let's get some food in ya, and then we'll see what else your body might be hungry for."

"Oh-ho, it's gonna be a pretty big order." I run a finger down his chest to the ripples of his abs, and his skin undulates beneath my touch.

"Don't you worry. I'll have no problem filling your order, baby." He grabs my waist, swings his legs around and stands up from the bed with me still clinging to him. I feel his cock press into my ass. "Fuck," he says, no doubt fully aware of its position. "We gotta get you dressed." He lifts me away from his body, gently sets me down on my feet, and heads over to his dresser.

I stand there, mouth open, drooling over his long, lean, muscular body. Fuck his ass is. It's biteable. I want to sink my teeth into it. To think, that's where all his power had come from. He used those muscles to fuck me last night. God. I'd loved to be a fly on the wall to see that going on. Jax's ass flexing and releasing—now that's gotta be a magnificent sight.

"Here," he turns around, and for the first time I get a full view of his cock. Holy shit. He's outstanding. "Come on," he grimaces, shaking the shirt in his hand. "Stop looking at me like that and get dressed."

"Like what?" I grin.

"Like you wantta skip breakfast and get right to the dessert."

"I like dessert." I lick my lips.

"So do I, but I'm gonna get some real food in you before you get any treats, baby." He walks over. "Put your arms up," he says, in a tone that I only know how to obey. He pulls the shirt over my body. "There," he sighs with what sounds like relief. He struts back over, grabs a pair of sweats from his drawer, and puts them on. "There," he says again snapping the waistband.

"What?" I saunter over to him and put my hands on my hips. "You think now that we're covered, you're safe?"

"No. In no way am I safe when I'm around you." He bends down. "You're a troublemaker. You make me wanna do bad things to you."

I gaze at him and remember the way I responded to his roughness last night. "Jax," I take his hand into mine. "Nothing you could do to me could ever be bad."

He rubs his thumb over my hand and stares at me. I see that he wants to say something, but he just smiles.

"I'm glad that I'm here," I say.

"So am I." His eyes linger on mine a second longer. Then, holding my hand to his, he starts for the door. "I gotta warn ya, I'm not too good with sunny side up."

"That's okay, I like mine over easy," I say as he guides me into the kitchen.

"Sit down." He stops and waits for me to settle into the chair. He leans in for a chaste kiss. "Now, you stay right here while I whip something up for us." He stands.

"You like ordering me around, don't you," I tease.

"No." He sets his hands on the table, bends down, eyes dark and intent. "Let's get something clear here. When we fuck, if I tell you to do something, it's so that I can regain control over not you, but myself. Understand?"

Holy shit! Now that's gotta be the hottest thing any guy's ever said to me. To know that I make Jax lose control like that, it feels so powerful. I'm not even sure how to answer him. I resort to a slow nod of the head.

"Good." He again stands, the intensity tumbling from him. "Eggs, toast, and how about some bacon?"

"Sure." I smile.

I watch Jax as he works in the kitchen, cracking eggs and flipping bacon. We make small talk as we tease each other with our eyes.

Zeke comes strolling into the kitchen in nothing but a pair of boxers, rubbing his belly with the words 'Ride The Lightning' tattooed on it. "Breakfast, awesome—" His eyes connect with mine. His left brow lifts. I don't take advantage of the perfectly sculptured nearly naked male body before me. I keep my eyes level with his. Zeke Declan is one hot boy, but I've never felt the attraction that most girls in Galveston County do. My eyes were only ever for Jax.

"Well, hello, Emmie Rue," Zeke says with a crafty grin. He sits down across from me.

Jax glares over at him. Zeke flashes him that same shrewd grin. "Mornin', buttercup." He winks at Jax, and he has that wink down to a science. He's comfortable giving it and has the timing to a T. It's perfect, with just the right amount of closure to seal the deal.

"Mornin', fucker," Jax grunts.

Zeke sets his hand on his thigh and rubs his chin, still looking at Jax. "So," his smile grows, "I see you finally got the girl, huh?" Zeke turns to me. "My big bro here, he's wanted you like for-fucking-ever. Did ya know that?"

"No." My heart jumps to my throat. He's kidding, right? I shift to Jax, who's walking over with a plate of food in his hand. Without making eye contact, he sets it down in front of me. "I didn't know that," I say.

"Hey," Zeke looks up at Jax, looking wounded, "where's mine?"

Jax's eyes, that haven't left Zeke, darken. "Go put some fucking clothes on."

"What," he innocently throws his hands in the air. "I didn't know ya had company." His amber eyes, a shade lighter than Jax's, sway on over to me. "Sorry, Em. I'm usually the only one who brings the ladies home, but they're usually gone by morning."

"Yeah," I laugh, "I remember the rules."

"Zeke," Jax snaps.

"What the fuck, dude," Zeke scowls up at him, but Jax doesn't back down. "Fuck it. I'm going. I'm not hungry anyway." He rises, watching Jax wander back over to the stove, and then he turns to me with a little grin. "Besides," his voice lowers, "I think the old man wants you all to himself." He gives me one of those practiced winks before leaving the room.

I'm not sure what just happened, the whole thing about Zeke saying that Jax finally got the girl. Yeah, that shit's stuck in my head. Rayna's always known that I've had a thing for Jax, maybe Zeke knew, too. Maybe he's messing with Jax or me. But Zeke's never been the mean type. He's a say it like it is kind of guy. I'm sure he's broken many hearts because of it. But I don't think he would fuck with us like that and bring up the past. Laugh at Jax 'cause I finally landed him.

My eyes follow Jax as he comes over to the table with his own plate and sits down.

"Eat," he says, lifting his fork. He's telling me what to do again. Does that mean he's trying to regain some kind of control over himself? Oh hell, now that I know that little tidbit about him, it's going to drive me insane. Did it bother him what Zeke said?

"What did Zeke mean?" I'm putting it out there. Hell, everything else, including my heart, is pretty much already out there in the midst of all this shit.

With an unhurried, relaxed movement, he places his fork on the table and looks up at me. "What," he says as the beginning of a smile tips the corners of his mouth, "about me finally getting you?"

"Yeah." I hold my breath. Ya know that moment of truth—well, this is mine.

"When I was twenty-one, there was one day I patiently waited for," he says, his smile thinning.

"Yeah, and what day was that," I ask not sure where he's going with this.

"December 13th."

"That's my birthday?"

"I know."

He really remembers my birthday. The shock of this discovery hits me full force. I tingle all over. Could it be true? Has Jax always wanted me? Mentally running through everything, every look he ever gave me, every encounter we had, he never revealed any interest. Never. "Jax, what are you saying?"

"I wanted you. Always did. You were too young, though. So I told myself when you turned eighteen, I'd come for you. And I had every intention of making you mine. But do you remember what happened the week before your birthday?"

I scramble for an answer. What happened the week before my birthday? "Grams died," I breathe out prior to my brain having a chance to acknowledge it.

"Yes, that's right. And I had to drop out of college to take care of the store to support my pain-in-the-ass brothers. I was working endless hours. I barely slept. I had no life. It wouldn't have been fair of me to ask you to deal with that when your life was just starting. So I waited. But," he shrugs with a small smile, "Princess, I waited too long."

"No." I shake my head, this can't be true. "You didn't even look at me or talk to me. You ignored my existence."

"Oh, I looked, and the way I looked at you changed when you were sixteen. _Sixteen_ ," he stresses. "I was nineteen. Way too old."

"Sixteen," I say, my face crippling with confusion, skin still tingling.

"I was at the high school, waiting to meet the principal to try to talk him out of suspending Zeke for getting into a fight on school grounds. You didn't see me. I watched all-star Clay Young walk up to you in the hall and give you his number, and I watched you throw it out when he walked away. Then when Rayna came up and asked what he wanted, you told her that he was looking for what homework was due in some teacher's class. I thought it odd, you rejecting a guy that every girl in high school would've killed to gone out with, and then not telling your best friend about it."

"I remember that day. Clay Young was a cocky jerk," I say, still trying to wrap my head around it all. All this time, Jax wanted me, too.

"Yeah, I know, and I suspected that's why you tossed out his number. It just surprised me that the beauty queen wouldn't want the high school king. And it made me take another look at you. I thought about how you could've embarrassed him, told everyone that you turned him down, but you didn't."

"I didn't need to make an ass out of him. He did that whenever he opened his mouth."

Jax laughs. "I assumed as much. Still, it was mature, kind, and unselfish. It led me to believe that there was more to little Emmie Rue than tiaras and pretty dresses."

"So, are you saying you fell for my kind heart, Jax Declan?"

"No, Em. I fell for the whole damn package. Besides that pretty face and awesome body, I know there's a beautiful person inside of you. I watched, always catching the good parts of you."

"When, obviously, I wasn't looking."

"Like I said, you were too young."

"And now," I say with a sly grin, "I'm not."

He picks up his fork, giving me a smile that sends my pulses racing. "Eat," he points the fork at me, "and if you eat it all then we can discuss whether or not you can have some dessert."

####

####  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

For the next couple of weeks, I take things slow with Em. We go out on a few dates, jog, play, and eat together. The days that I open JZS's, she's there with me, working on her laptop while I set up. Every night we sleep together but even then, I take it slow. I don't want to fuck it up. Don't want to frighten her again with my potent needs. She said that we'd talk about our first night together, when she needed to use the safe words, when I made her cry, but she hasn't brought it up. Although I've never had a meaningful one, I do understand communication is important in any relationship.

I'm patient. I got no problem waiting.

I get to Rayna's place, park my truck, and get out. Em comes out of the house, runs over, and throws her body at me. I lift her, laughing, knowing we must look like two lustful teenagers to the neighbors, but I don't care. She's very affectionate. I'm getting used to it. I like it.

"Hey, princess," I say against the attack of her lips.

"Hey, sexy beast of my dreams," she says, always coming up with some crazy new pet name for me; yummy treat, master woody, royal buffness. I like that too, but for me she's just my beautiful Em or my princess. All that really matters is that she's indeed mine.

She drops her legs from around my waist and lands on her feet. Her hand comes out. "Give me your keys. I'm driving."

No one but me drives my truck, but I don't hesitate. I'd hand anything I got over to this woman. I fish them out of my pocket and give them up. "Where are we going?" She's taking me out tonight. She insists that it's her treat. She wants to do something nice for me. What she doesn't know is I'm all set. I'm good. I got what I want.

"You'll see." She snatches the keys from my hand and gives me a quick peck on the cheek before heading to my truck.

I climb into the passenger seat, watching her clip on the seatbelt. "Be careful, it's not like the golf cart you've been driving around in the Bayou. It's got some power."

She rolls her eyes at me, puts the key in the ignition and with a fucking heavy foot, we're off to God knows where.

Over these past few weeks, I realize that what I felt for Emmie Rue was nothing in comparison to the reality of knowing, touching, and having every beautiful morsel of her. Sure, I was physically attracted to her, and there was always this need to get close to her. I was drawn to her as if she had something that I couldn't live without. Fucked up, right? But to experience her, she's so much more. She means so much more to me. I'm no longer standing in the shadows of her existence. I'm becoming a part of her world, a world that I don't want to leave.

Still, with every day there comes the night.

The sky must've heard my thoughts. It turns dark, and then the rain hits, blurring the windshield.

"Shit!" Em glances down at the dashboard. "Where are the wipers?" Her nervous eyes shoot from me back to the road.

"Relax," I say, reaching over to flick them on, "you wanna pull over so I can drive?"

"No. I got this." She squints until the wipers start doing their job. "There," she opens her eyes wide. "That's better." Her shoulders drop.

I chuckle.

"Hey," her blue eyes flash at me. "I didn't know it was supposed to rain, did you?"

"Nope, Em, I didn't." I laugh again. She's so damn beautiful. I glance to the road and my stomach rolls. Fuck. It shrinks tight when she pulls into the May Jen Chinese Restaurant. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"What?" She glimpses at me. "You don't like Chinese," she says circling the full lot, looking for somewhere to park.

"Not one of my favorite foods. No." Fuck. I can't go in there. What if _she's_ working? I try to relax. Try to convince myself that maybe she doesn't work here anymore. I try to convince myself I'm freaking out for no good reason.

"I love it," Em says, "besides, there's gotta be something in there you can eat." She takes another turn in the lot. "They have chicken, steak, and..."

My ears drown out her words. All I hear is the thundering beat of my heart. I want to tell her everything about my past, just not yet. I'm all balls into this relationship, but I'm not sure where Em stands. She's certainly sending some damn good vibes my way, but I'm not certain she's ready to know that part of me. Hell, she had a small dose of it and that shit made her cry. She acts as though it never went down. I don't know if she's ashamed of me, or if she's ashamed of herself. Some woman work like that. They think they want it rough, but once it all gets going they get nervous. They're afraid to surrender their defenses and hand their control over to someone else, hence, the safe words.

It's not like it's a bad thing. It's a lifestyle for some, rough, kinky, dirty sex, but for others, they're afraid to cross that line, or they're just not into it. Either way, I respect what I am, and who they are. And if Em's not into it then I'll need to live without it. Hell, I had to learn how to control it. Now, I'll just need to take it a step further and learn how to tame it.

"Drive up to the front and get out. I'll park the truck so you don't get all wet."

She smirks at me. "I know you think I'm still a princess, but I'm not going to melt, Jax, if I get a little wet."

"Come on, baby," I smile at her, "just this once would you allow me to do the gentlemanly thing?"

"All right," she laughs, "just this once." She pulls up to the front and puts the truck into park.

I jump out and start around the truck. She meets me halfway for a quick kiss and takes off into the restaurant. Once inside the vehicle with the door closed, I release a shaky breath. I gaze into the window but can't make out much of what's going on inside the restaurant. I shift the truck into drive and stare straight ahead.

I could leave.

Fuck you, coward.

Em's in there waiting for you. You're not going anywhere but to her.

####

####  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I hurry through the restaurant doors, shaking the rain off my clothes. A woman comes to greet me, hands clasped together at her waist. "Hi," she glances out the window. "Wow. It's really coming down out there." She turns back with a smile. "How many tonight?"

"Oh," I push the wet strands back from my face, "just two. He's parking the car."

"Okay, I can show you to your table, and bring him on over when he gets in?"

"All right." I follow her into the next room.

"How's this?" She waves a hand at a quaint table nestled in the corner of the room.

"Perfect." I go to sit down, catching the blue sapphire encased in sterling silver around her neck. "That's beautiful," I settle into the seat, "your necklace."

"Oh," A smile lightens up her face as she touches it, "thanks. One year anniversary gift."

"Congrats."

"Thanks, it was a month ago, but honestly it feels like we're still on the honeymoon."

"We should all be so lucky. He certainly has great taste in jewelry."

"I'll tell him you said so, might boost his ego, but he deserves it. Besides great taste in jewelry, he's also a great guy," she says, and the love she obviously has for her husband glows in her eyes. "Can I start you out with something to drink?"

"Sure. Can I have a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon?"

"Coming right up, and my name's Sonia, by the way, if you need anything." She smiles and heads to the back.

I lean to the left, realizing she headed to the back and Jax might be looking for me. Then I see him with a different hostess. His shirt's soaked. It clings to every muscle on his upper body. The man, does he ever look anything less than mac-daddy delicious? Ever? His eyes find mine, and I start to imagine the things that I'm going to do to him tonight.

Sex has been great, but since my little meltdown the first night, I sense he's been holding back. I need to come clean. It feels so immature, though. "Hey, I freaked out because I was so out of mind in lust for you, afraid to lose you, that I felt the need to make you feel like you did something wrong." Yeah, that's just so insecure. It really was hot, and I want to get back to that place with him. In order to do that, I'm gonna have to pull up my big-girl pants and tell him the truth.

I gotta say, though, these past few weeks have been like a dream. He's amazing in every way. I'm comfortable around him. He makes me that way. So, telling him anything should come easy. He's patient and understanding. The way he smiles at me. His husky low whispers in my ear when we're around people. The funny things he says, the sexy things, and the promises. He always keeps his promises, whether it's the time he's coming to pick me up, or the amount of times he's going to make me come that night, he always follows through. I'm falling so hard for him. I'm not sure where this is all going, but I have nearly two months with him, and from there. Well, who knows?

He settles his strong, lean body in the chair across from me, and even as the hostess asks what he'd like to drink, his eyes don't leave mine. Yeah, he does that a lot too, and people notice. But Jax, he's not the type of guy to give a shit what other people might think. And he carries himself that way, too. He's confident, minus all that repellent cockiness. Sometimes, I wonder if he truly knows how fucking hot he is.

After the hostess turns to me, and I let her know that I've already been taken care of, she heads to the back room to fetch Jax's beer.

"You're drenched," I laugh.

"Yeah," he swipes a hand over his face, "I don't know, princess, I think you mighta melted out there."

"Funny," I playfully squint my eyes at him.

"I'm just sayin'," he shrugs with an irresistibly devastating grin. He looks down, reaches for my hand across the table, and once he apprehends it, he gently rubs his thumb over my fingers. I love it. "If I haven't told you yet tonight," he looks up at me, "you're beautiful, Emmie Rue." Something else he does, always saying shit like that. Who would've known Jax Declan was such a wonderful lover? As always, my cheeks flush hot from his words.

"And even resembling a drowned rat, you're still dashing as ever Mr. Declan."

We play like that throughout dinner. Jax found a dish of steak, peppers, and onions. I enjoyed some chicken and veggies with a side of lo mein. After the meal, he goes to get the truck and I head to the ladies' room.

I finish with my business and exit the stall; standing at the sink is the hostess that seated me at the table earlier. "Oh, hey." I smile at her in the mirror, but when she sees me, her eyes quickly divert to the sink. Weird. "I thought maybe you were done for the night," I say, turning on the faucet to wash my hands.

"Ah," she glances at me from the corner of her eye, "no," she looks back down at her hands vigorously scrubbing away. "Sarah had your table. I just meet, greet, and seat."

"Oh," I shut off the water and grab a few paper towels. "Are you okay?" I'm not sure why it comes out, could be that her hands are shaking, her face is pasty white, and she refuses to look me directly in the eyes.

She grabs a few paper towels herself. "Was that Jax Declan with you?"

"Yeah," I drop my towel in the garbage can, not taking my eyes from hers. "Do you know Jax?"

"We went to school together," she says, eyes examining me, as she also gets rid of her paper towels. "You're not from around here, are you?"

"Actually, I lived here for about ten years, but I left shortly after high school, and I'm a few years younger than Jax. So, you probably wouldn't remember me."

"Probably," she pauses as if she's hesitant to say what's on her mind, "Are, ah, are you and Jax dating?"

"Sort of, I guess, for a couple weeks now, yeah." Shit, why was that so hard to get out? "Why do you ask?"

"Ah," she stares at me for an uncomfortable moment. "Never mind," she waves a shaky hand at me, and then picks up her purse from the counter, practically dropping it from her trembling fingers.

"What is it?" I ebb closer, needing to know what has this girl all flustered.

"Look, you seem like a really nice person," she takes a deep breath, "and it's not really my place—"

"Listen. You seem like a decent person, too, but if you got something that you need to say, please, just say it."

She releases a long-winded sigh. "Jax Declan, he isn't what he seems. I dated him in high school, and," she gazes at me for another long drawn out second. And me, I want to hear what she has to say. So, I patiently wait. "And," she says voice cracking, "he nearly raped me."

Did I hear her right? Did she just say...I tilt my head. No. I couldn't have heard her correctly. "Jax Declan?" She has to be mistaken. "Are you sure we're talking about the same guy here?"

"I'm sorry," she shakes her head, remorse etching into every line of her face. She back steps and thrusts a hand out as if to stop me from saying anything. But I'm fucking speechless. "I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have said that." She spins around and is out the door before my mouth has a chance to begin to work. Jax nearly raped her. Now, why the fuck would she say that? What the hell is wrong with that chick? She can't still be pissed about a breakup that happened over ten years ago, could she? No. She didn't strike me as some vindictive bitch. She talked about her husband as if she really loves him. There'd be no reason for her to bash Jax after all these years. But if that weren't it, what would she gain by telling a complete stranger that some guy from high school nearly raped her. I mean, that's some corrupt shit to say about another person.

I yank the bathroom door open. My stomach rolls for the only logic flipping around in my head for her to say something like that is that she was trying to warn me.

####

####  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

She feels a mile away as she quietly sits in the truck, looking out the window. Thankfully, we didn't run into Sonia in that restaurant. She was nowhere in sight. She probably doesn't work there anymore.

Still, what the fuck's up with Em giving me the silent treatment? I don't like it.

I glance over at her. "Hey," I say, and her blue eyes flash over to me, but that spark seems dulled by something heavily weighing on her mind, and I don't fucking like that shit either. "Your place or mine?" I smile. It's something one of us usually asks toward the end of the evening. The question of whether or not we'll be sleeping together never comes up, but tonight, I think that it just might.

"I'm tired, Jax." She turns back to the window.

I grip the steering wheel and try to concentrate on the road. My left eye twitches and my palms sweat. Fuck it. "Okay, Em," I stare start ahead. "You want me to take you back to Rayna's then?"

"Yeah," she softly says.

Fuck! What the fuck is going on here? We had a nice time at dinner, played and laughed. I held her hand. I did everything right. Maybe she's thinking about what's going to happen when the summer's over. God knows that I have. I don't want her to go, but never in million years would I let her know. I can't make her stay. She's going to have to decide that shit all on her own. All I can do is express my feelings to her. And as hard as it's been in the past for me to do that, I got no problem revealing them to Em.

It ain't like I got much to offer her, though. Hell, I live in a damn apartment behind a fucking bar with my two irresponsible younger brothers. Yeah, that's gotta be real appealing to any woman, right? Em deserves more than that. I know it. But if she did stay, fuck, I'd give her whatever she wants. Whatever her little heart desires, I'd provide it. Fact is I'm crazy about her.

I pull up to Rayna's and put the truck in park. My chest hurts. My heart's pounding so hard, it feels like she's trying to slip out of it, but it's doin' its damnedest to keep her from going anywhere. Fuck, I wish I could do the same, but I refuse to pressure her into this relationship.

"Thanks for dinner," I say turning in her direction, leaning my body toward hers.

A faint smile touches her pretty lips. "You're welcome." She twists around and reaches for the door. "I'll call you."

"Em," I try to stop her with my voice, although my hands want to reach out, pull her into my arms, and never let go. She looks back at me with an unreadable, flat expression. "You okay, princess?"

"Yeah," she touches her belly. "I think maybe something I ate isn't sitting right with me."

"You need me to get you anything. I can run to the drugstore—"

"No." She gently touches my shoulder. "I'm sure it'll pass." She leans in and kisses me on the cheek. "I'll call you tomorrow."

I gaze into her eyes and that pain in my chest intensifies. "Yeah. Okay." I sit back. "Good night, Em."

"Night, Jax," she says, climbs out of the truck and closes the door.

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I enter the house close the door and lean back against it. My body trembles from my betrayal. How could I think that Jax could ever do that to someone? Rape? Granted, he got a little rough the first night we were together, but the instant I asked, he stopped and pulled right back.

"Emmie." Lurlene comes walking out from the kitchen. "Where's your sidekick?" She stops, her eyes running up and down me. "Oh, honey." She walks right over. "Honey, what's wrong?" She wraps her arms around me, and shit if I don't start to cry.

"What happened?" I hear Rayna's concerned voice.

"I don't know," Lurlene says from over my shoulder.

I lift my head, wipe my tears, and try to calm down.

"Sit." Rayna points to the sofa, and I do as she suggests. "Relax, take some deep breaths," she says, coming to sit beside me. "That's it, calm down." She runs a hand down my hair. "You okay?" I nod my head. "You want to talk about it?"

Lurlene joins us on the couch. "It's okay if you don't, Emmie, but it might make you feel better to get it out."

I laugh, sniffling back another tear. "I love you guys."

"Did something happen with Jax," Rayna asks, there's no beating around the bush with her.

"Yeah," I wipe the remaining tears from my eyes. "We went out to dinner, had a great time, and just before we left, I went to the bathroom. The hostess there, she seemed nice but then she said something about Jax that I just can't believe."

Lurlene's brows gather. "What?"

"She," I stammer, voice breaking up, "she told me," oh God, I don't know if I can even say it aloud but with both of them staring at me, waiting for an answer, I have no choice. "She said that Jax tried to rape her in high school."

"What the fuck." Rayna's green eyes go all wild as she shoots up from the sofa. "Why the hell would someone say something like that?" Her mouth drops wide open. "Wait a damn second. I remember hearing something about this," she waves a finger at me. "Yeah, I can't remember her name—"

"Sonia," I say.

"Yes," Rayna snaps her fingers. "That's it. Her and Jax dated for almost a year, and rumor had it that when they broke up, she started saying shit about him, shit like that." Her shoulders drop, and face relaxes. "Now come on, Emmie, we're talking about Jax here. It's not true, girl, and you know it. It was high school crap. She's just a girl who got her heart broken."

"I didn't even know he dated anyone in high school," I say, hoping what Rayna's saying is true.

"I think it was his sophomore year. I heard about it hanging around Slate, but I didn't repeat it 'cause I never believed it. And neither should you."

"I just don't understand why she would say that to me. She doesn't know me, it's been years, so why?"

"You don't believe it's true, do you?" Lurlene touches my knee. I turn to her, and my face must be giving away my momentary uncertainty. Her eyes soften. "Oh, honey, if you're not sure, just go talk to him about it. I know you care about him, don't let this mess that up for you."

I take a deep breath. She's right. I should just go over there and lay it all out on the table. Tell him the truth about our first night together and clear up this shit, too.

"You're right," I say what's in my head. I stand up. "I'm going to talk to him."

"Atta girl," Rayna smiles, "I'll get the golf cart keys."

"No, I'm gonna walk. I need to clear my head a bit."

####

####  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

After changing into a pair of jeans, a cami, and some sneakers, I head out the door. It's dark, and the air is so warm. It takes me about fifteen minutes to get to Jax's place. Even with fear wrapped tightly around it, my heart hasn't let up. It's pumping hard. I lift a rickety hand to knock on the door. My mind mingles with hope and fear. I'm not sure what I'm going to say. I rehearsed a few things, but I know the second I see him, I'll probably choke up.

The door swings open and Jax's dark eyes meet mine. "Em?" His eyes race over me. "Is everything okay," he says as though he sees right through to my apprehension.

"We need to talk," I say, and then hold my breath.

He stares at me as if he's trying to read my mind and figure out what's going on in there. "Come in," he finally says, stepping back.

I enter. It's dark and quiet, and it smells of him.

"Zeke's here, in his room. You want to go in my bedroom or sit out here in the kitchen?"

"Your room." I don't want anyone to overhear our conversation. I'm embarrassed with myself for even asking Jax about this, but I need to know the truth. I have to hear it from his mouth. I also need the reassuring confines of where we make love in his bedroom. At least, as of late that's what it feels like— love. So, whatever happens in the next few moments inside those four walls could damage me something bad or take me to complete surrender to what I feel for Jax Declan.

He reaches for my hand. I love when he holds my hand. I'm bound to him flesh, heart, and soul. He guides me to his room. He follows me in and quietly closes the door behind us. He pulls me to him. His head bends and his gentle lips nuzzle against my neck. I hear him inhale as he brushes past my cheek to meet my mouth for a soft kiss. His hand slides to my nape as he wrenches back, eyes bearing a hint of uneasiness. "Tell me what's on your mind, princess."

I withdraw from his comforting embrace, and he lets me go. His palm slithers from my neck as he allows me my space.

"Shit." I pace the room for a few seconds, stop, and look at him. "I don't know how to say this," I smooth my lips together, but he's just standing there, waiting, "or how to ask this. Or," I waver. "God, I don't know."

"It's okay, Em. Don't worry, you can ask me anything, say anything. Baby, I'm yours, whatever you need. Just take a deep breath, and when you're ready, say it."

Dammit. How can I question that, how can I doubt him? He couldn't have done what that woman said. I'll just tell him about it, and we'll probably have a good laugh over the whole thing.

"Well, tonight, when we were at that restaurant, I think I ran into one of your exes."

My relief is short-lived. Jax's entire face turns white. He pushes his hands through his hair, walks over to the bed, and sits down. "What did she say to you," he asks, head bowed, eyes focused on the floor.

"She said that," I swallow the knot lodged in my throat. I can't get the words out.

His dark eyes lift and bear down upon me. "Em?"

Screw it. I just need to say it. "She said that you tried to rape her but I...I—"

"Stop." He glares up at me. His chest rising and falling as though any second his heart is going to burst out from it.

"Jax, I—"

His hand comes up. "Just let me explain, before you say another word." He stares at me, not backing down from my vigilant watch. "I was nearly seventeen. We'd been dating for months. It was the night of some school dance. She told me that she wanted to, ya know. Go all the way. I was a virgin and after months of her teasing me, and of me getting so close, my punk ass was gonna get what he wanted. We were in my Gram's car, shit started to get going and," he clasps his hands together, wringing them until his knuckles whiten, "she told me to stop."

"And you did, right? I knew it had to be something—"

"Em," he cuts me off with his sharp tone. "She had to tell me stop more than once." A muscle flicks angrily at his jaw. "I was so caught up in the moment, a kid with a hard-on who didn't know how to control himself. I almost didn't stop. I pulled her pants off while she was hitting me, yelling for me to stop. It came real close," he sighs, hands shaking, "I remember I looked up and that's when I saw her fear. It wasn't until then that I realized what the fuck I was doing. I scared her. Hell, I scared myself. She broke up with me, as she should have. She told people what I did to her, and I just let everyone believe what they wanted."

Those secure white walls around me start to crumble and cave in, suffocating my resolve. Sorting through my own feelings, Jax's don't go unnoticed. He's remorseful. The incident scared him. It's all over his beautiful face, evident in his trembling hands.

He rubs the back of his neck. "I didn't try to have sex again for a long time after that. I eventually met this woman. She was a lot older than me. She was into all that kinky shit. She liked sex the way I do," he clears his throat, eyes back on the floor. "She taught me how to control myself. And after her, I continued to date older woman. They tend to be discreet, especially when they're fucking around with a younger guy. And that's why you never saw me with anyone."

"Jax." I take a step toward him but the way every muscle in his body tenses make my steps falter. "I know you didn't mean to hurt or scare that girl."

"You don't get it," he says with a faint contemptuous smile. "I like it rough," his dark eyes snap to me. "It fucking turns me on, but some people don't want it that way, and it was wrong of me to push Sonia like that regardless of what or who I am, just like it was wrong of me to do that to you." His face crumples as he stands up from the bed. His hands fist, shoulders lift and eyes darken. He's struggling, fighting a fight against himself. "I'm sorry, baby."

It's killing me to see him like this. "Oh no, Jax, you didn't hurt me." My foot slides forward, bringing me closer. "You didn't scare me."

"Fuck that," he says, glaring down at me. "I'm no better than that fuck-face you went to the prom with."

"Don't say that, you stopped yourself. Garret had no intentions of stopping. He would have raped me if Slate hadn't stepped in. Garret was a, he was a monster."

"And what the hell do you think I am?" he seethes, eyes wild, and nostrils flaring. "I sure ain't no fucking prince charming, princess. I tried to warn you about guys like me. Fuck, Em. I don't know what I was thinking. I actually thought I had a chance with you, that we could be together. But baby, I am the monster I tried to warn you about, the things I want to do to you. Hell," a devious chuckle rumbles from him, "you don't know how much it turns me on when I spank you."

"You're not a monster, Jax."

"I like hitting you. I like seeing the mark of my hand on your body. Really, what the fuck do you think that makes me—"

"Stop!" I cover my ears, shaking my head. "No more!" I can't listen to him turn what he did to me into something vile. To my surprise, the safe words work even when we're not having sex. Jax's mouth clamps shut. He stands with his hands still fisted at his sides.

"Em," his hands release, and then ball up once more, "I made you fucking cry."

I touch his flexed forearm. His muscles roll beneath my fingers. "No, Jax." I lean my head back and gaze up at him. "That's not why I cried." There's a pensive shimmer in the shadow of his eyes as he carefully views me from weighted lids. "I cried because I was afraid that you'd take me like you did that woman at the bar, just once. It'd be a one-time thing. I thought maybe that's all you wanted from me, but I wanted more. The way you touched me, it felt good. Believe me, I didn't use the safe words because you scared or hurt me. I used them because I thought you'd hurt my heart."

His hand sifts through my hair. He grips it and bends my head back further. His mouth dips close to mine. "You listen to me, Emmie Rue. I will never ever hurt your heart, princess. I will never break it. The only thing I want is to be a part of it. I want you to feel me deep inside of it."

"Jax, I feel you there and that's what scared me. All the emotions, everything you were making me feel, it was too much for me to handle," I say as the soft graze of his breath heats my lips.

"I told you before," his eyes stay locked on mine, "I want all your layers. I want your fears, happiness, desires, acceptance, and vulnerability. I want your love. Em, I fucking want it all."

"Yeah," I gaze up into his dark passion filled eyes, "and once you get it, what are ya going to do with it?"

"Well, I'm gonna, keep it, and I ain't ever gonna let it fuckin' go."

That's a good enough answer for me. "Take me, Jax, like you did that first night. I need you just as you are. Tonight, I want all of your layers."

His mouth brushes over mine. Then he drags his teeth across my bottom lip causing just enough pain. "Are you sure after everything you've learned about me tonight that you still want to play by my rules?"

"Yes." I steal a lick across my tender lip. "I trust you. I want you. I need you. And I could never fear you."

He grabs my chin and gazes into my eyes. "You sure, Em?" He lightly slaps the side of my face with his palm. "I'm not going to be gentle."

"That's good. I'm not looking for gentle. Tonight, I don't want you holding anything back," I say, feeling the sting from his touch still lingering on my cheek.

He glares down at me for a few long hard seconds. "Show me then. Show me how much you want it." His grip tightens on my hair. "Get on your knees." He yanks me down until I'm kneeling in front of him. "Unzip my pants, reach inside, and grab my cock."

If he's trying to frighten me, it's not going to work. The way his tone gets, that deep and demanding tenor rips right through me. I'm instantly wet. I eagerly unbutton his pants, pull down the zipper, and wrap my fingers around his hardness. His tight veined flesh melts into the palm of my hand as I pull him free.

"Look at me," he says, tugging at my hair. I abide his command and catch the fire in his eyes. It burns me to the core. "What you got there in your hands, it belongs to you. It doesn't belong anywhere but in your hand, your mouth, or your body. Do you understand?"

"Yes," I whisper, my fingers tightening around his promising arousal.

"Good," he stares down at me from the hood of his lids. "Now be a good girl, open that pretty mouth of yours, and suck my cock like you own it."

I lower my head and pull the tip of his hot, bulging shaft to my mouth. My lips sheath his tight warm skin. He tastes so good. Swaying back, I swirl my tongue around his head before taking him back into my mouth. The masculine groan that echoes in my ears encourages me to suck him hard. His hands tangle in my hair and he draws me back and forth, pushing his cock in and out of my mouth.

"Fuck, baby, those sweet lips are killing me," he growls. "Damn, feels amazing." He pushes himself all the way to the back of my throat and holds me there until I gag. "Shit," he hisses, letting up on his hold. "You might just be able to take it all." I look up at him. "You okay," he says in a low raspy voice.

"Yes," I say, stroking his cock and enjoying the way his face flexes with need.

"I want back in that mouth, take as much of me as you can." His hands grip tighter to my hair, his hips thrust and he reenters my wanton mouth. He hits the back of my throat, slipping deeper and deeper. I want it all. I want to swallow him whole, and I try but my reflexes refuse to cooperate. I gag again. And he releases me. "Damn! You're so fucking hot," he says with a punctured gasp, "such a good girl taking me like that."

Needing a break, I move my hand up and down over his taut wet skin. I peer up at him. His head is back, eyes closed, neck corded, mouth slightly opened. "Fuck, yeah," he bends forward and views me from weighted lids. "Yes, that's it. Look at me while you stroke me, let me see those beautiful eyes. God, Em, you're gorgeous."

"I'm so wet," I utter the absolute truth. "I want you inside of me."

"Not just yet, princess. I want to play a bit before I fuck that sweet pussy of yours."

Play. Well, now I know what that means. He's going to touch me, tease me, and bring me to the brink of total oblivion. And I can't wait. Being with him is out of this world. He takes me beyond my limits, forces me to go places I normally wouldn't go. But he's the only one who could do this to me for with every fiber of my being, I am completely his.

His fingers weed from my hair, and he gently removes my hand from his erection. He takes his shirt off and then his pants before he walks over and sits naked on the edge of the bed. "Get up off your knees and strip for me. Slow. I want to savor every inch of you."

####

####  CHAPTER NINETEEN

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I take my time removing my clothes as Jax sits comfortably naked on the bed watching me. His eyes follow my every movement, an erotic promenade that tweaks my nipples. I drop my cami on the floor and reach back to unclasp my bra. My heavy and flushing breasts are begging to be free. I drag the straps down my arms and drop my bra to the floor. Jax quietly observes my strip tease. From across the room, his eyes assist in taking my clothes off. He's coaxing me with them. I unbutton my jeans, slowly undo the zipper, and shimmy out of them. I pinch the thin string of my thong. Jax bites his bottom lip and grabs his erect cock. My pussy throbs as I slide my panties down my hips and thighs. Keeping my eyes on him, I step out of the last stitch of my clothing.

"Yes," he half-groans, stroking the aroused flesh in his hand. "Bring your beautiful body over here." His biceps flex as his hand moves up and down on his thick arousal. "Bring it on over here to me." I nearly tiptoe as I make my way to him halting in front of his rampant body. He grabs my arms. "Straddle me, baby." I open my legs and move onto his thick thighs. Needing him inside of me, I go to scoot forward but with strong hands, he grips my hips and stops me. "That's far enough."

"Jax," I groan, "that's not far enough." It came out a lot more pouty than what I would've liked, but damn!

"I told you." An easy smile dangles at the corners of his mouth. "I want to play first."

"Yeah, and just what did you have in mind?" Legs spread wide, I settle down on his lap, still not happy about not getting what I want. He holds his smile, and that just sexually frustrates me further. When he doesn't respond, I grab his cock and start to stroke it. "Well, I want to play, too."

"That's okay, you do that, baby," he says with a low growl. The tip of his finger touches my nipple, and he gradually circles around it. "And while you're doing that, I'm going to tease you right here." He pinches my nipple. I jerk his hard flesh quicker. "And," his other hand slides between my legs, "I'm going to tease you right here, too." His finger thrusts deep inside of me, and I bear down to meet his hand with a cry. "And now, I'm going to bite your nipple, and for as long as you can take it, I will continue to play with you, right here." His finger pushes deeper into me. I moan from the force of him so far inside of me. "You understand?" He arches a brow.

"Yes," I pump my hand along his thick, long phallus, "I got it."

His mouth lowers to my hard bead and his teeth sink around it. It feels good, the slight tension on my sensitive bud. His thumb finds my clit, and with precise movement, he buffs my nub. God. How does he know to hit that just right place? He's always spot on. It makes me want to combust the instant he touches me. My hand tightens around his cock and my hips start to move. He bites down harder on my nipple. My eyes snap to his as I squeal. His wicked dark gaze beams up at me. His teeth descend even more into my swollen peak. It hurts, but it's as if his fingers and thumb sooth any pain away. Then he bites even harder and a flash of pain zaps up my spine. "No more!"

He instantly releases my nipple, gives it a light kiss as his other hand moves from between my legs. He sets his palms on the bed and leans back as a sexy little smile spreads across his lips. Damn, he does like this shit doesn't he? I gotta admit, it's turning me right the hell on, too.

"Well, is that it," I say for I'm so not done letting him play with me.

"I don't know, is it?" His dark eyebrows arch mischievously. "You do have another nipple."

"You want to bite the other one?"

Still holding that wicked little grin, he slowly moves his head up and down.

"Okay," I say, clinging to his erection for support. I sit up straight. "Do it."

He shifts forward, eyes clamped tightly to mine. He takes the same approach, slow and playful until he's back to making my body burn with pain and pleasure. His fingers work my pussy and just when I'm about to come, the pain becomes so intense that I blurt out the safe words. "Dammit!"

Again, he relaxes back with his palms on the bed observing me. "It's okay. No need to curse. I promise, baby," he says, voice low and husky, "I'm gonna take care of you."

"Yeah, but I was just about to come!"

"I know," his lips turn up. "I felt it around my finger, that's why I bit you harder."

"You wanted me to stop you?" What the hell!

"Yes." His hands move from the bed to my breasts and with the edge of his fingers, he lightly feathers up and down over my hard and aching nipples. Oh. My. God! They're so sensitive and that faint stroking is making my toes curl. My orgasm recharges.

"No more biting, promise," he says, torturing me with his deliberate touch. "I'm just going to keep doing this, okay?"

"Yes." I nod. "Please, Jax, don't stop doing that." I rock my hips. "Shit! That feels so good."

"I won't stop, but, babe, that means you're going to have to touch yourself for me," he says, his fingers lighting up my body with that simple light touch. "Think you can do that for me?"

Gazing into those sinfully dark eyes, I'll do anything for the man, as long as he keeps up with what he's doing to my tits. Christ! It's so stimulating. My nipples are burning, and the heat soars all through me. I slip my hand between my legs.

"That's it. Find your clit, and you know I don't want you fucking around. You stroke it until you come."

"It's not going to take long," I say and do as Jax orders, watching his face flare with brazen desire. I find my clit and rub it. Between that and his fingers taunting the hell out of my aching nipples, it takes but a few seconds for me to surrender to the white-hot rush that erupts from deep inside of me. I buck against him, trying to get him inside of me. But he won't allow it. He reaches around my waist and flips me onto my belly on the bed.

"Get up on your knees. I want to taste you."

I plant my palms into the mattress and lift up onto my knees. On all fours, I glance over my shoulder.

"No," he comes over to me, and gently guides my head back onto the mattress with his large hand. "Just your ass in the air, yeah," he says when I'm in the position he wants, "just like that."

With his eyes on me, he reaches into the nightstand drawer for a condom. Then he prowls to the end of the bed and kneels directly behind me. "You look delicious." His hand slides along the slope of my ass. My skin reels to life beneath his feathery erotic touch. "So wet and pink." He traces a finger down my thigh circling back up and gliding it along my exposed flesh. My legs shake. I squeeze my eyes shut, preparing and waiting for his next naughty exploit. "I want to spank this ass," he grabs a fistful of my naked cheek, "but we're not alone tonight. So, instead, I'm going to devour you from pussy to ass. I'm going to lick you clean and then I'm going to fuck you so good."

"Shit!" I roll my head on the mattress feeling his words already taking over my body.

He grips my hips, and his mouth touches the defenseless flesh between my thighs. I bite my lip trying to hold back an ear-piercing cry. As he said, we're not alone tonight, and I don't want any of the Declan brothers rushing in to save me from the wrath of Jax's ravishing bestial attack. Damn, he's worthy with that mouth. He does exactly as informed. He eats me from pussy to ass. And, never being tasted so thoroughly before, my entire body turns to fire.

He licks me everywhere, his tongue fucking me senseless. My legs weaken as another orgasm builds, but he holds me strong by the hips with his firm hands as he devours me, hungrily consuming all the wetness from between my trembling thighs. God. Who would've known there were men made like him? He really knows how to take a woman to her breaking point, more than once in a single night, all the while still leaving her craving and needing so much more. I will always want Jax Declan. This will never ever go away.

Then, I hear the sound that's going to deliver me what I need, the ripping open of a condom. I clutch the sheet and lift my ass higher. I want it. Bad. My heart palpitates. Thinking about him entering me, the anticipation is too much. "Jax," I pant. "Please, Jax." Shit. I sound like a wanton bitch, but I don't care.

"Almost there, baby. Fuck, you got the sweetest pussy. You taste so good on my tongue, Em." His hands are back on my hips, fingers digging into my skin. "Brace yourself, princess. I'm going to take you as I've wanted for the past few weeks." He enters me fully in one deep thrust and my insides cling to his burning male heat. I don't want to let go, not ever. "I'm going to take you so fucking hard," he grunts, and with each retraction, he follows it up with another forceful surge back into my body.

####

####  CHAPTER TWENTY

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/jax_name.jpeg)

The second I push through Em's softness, my balls lift and stiffen. I rear my hips and heave back in with more force than the last. I've been riding the high of my aggression since I sank my teeth into her nipple. Strong and intense, as usual, it takes me over. This is what I'm comfortable with, this is what I need, to fuck my beautiful Em hard.

She cries a sweet sound that pumps my heated blood. Sweat beads on my forehead. My fingers dig deeper into her pliable flesh as I escort her fine naked body to and from me. I gaze down at her luscious ass, narrow waist, and the sensual curve of the small of her back. Her long blond hair cascades over her shoulder as she turns her head. When those sultry blue eyes find me, something deep inside shifts that intense and strong need to take her hard escapes my body. A rush of complete ecstasy, one not driven by my cock, disables me. The continuous euphoric, intense desire, the perpetual need, and the undying want deactivates my resolve. My hands still and my hips slow. Shit. No!

"Jax," she says, staring up at me.

My chest tightens, and it's like I forget how to breathe. Hands shaking, head foggy, and vision blurred, I pull out of her. I stumble back from the bed and swipe a hand over my sweaty face. She rolls onto her back and goes to sit up. "No, stay there," I stop her with the hold up of a trembling hand, still gasping for air and shaking from the inside out. Fuck, I clench my heavy chest. What the hell is going on here? I give my head a jiggle, trying to assemble some command over what I think my body is attempting to tell me.

Fuck. I need to get it together here.

I'll just get back in bed, and I'll feel it. The aggression will come back and this other shit will go back to where it came from, which I fear might just be my heart. If it doesn't, shit. I don't know what to do then. It's the way I know how to fuck, it's what I'm conditioned to, not this sense of, dammit. No. Oh, fuck, this can't be how it feels, can it?

I make my way back to the bed and crawl on top of her. Our bodies touch, my eyes meet hers, and everything becomes crystal clear. Yep. This is it. It's gotta be, for no longer do I want to fuck her hard. No. All I want to do is, motherfucker. I want to make slow and passionate love to her, fucking love.

"Jax, it's okay." Her eyes soften as her palm encases my cheek. "You're not being too rough. The sex feels great."

"Fuck," I gaze down into her beautiful eyes. "Em," I half-chuckle, "babe, this ain't sex."

"What do you mean?"

I wrap my arms around her and pull her close. "This is you reaching inside of me, and finding something that I didn't know exists, a part of me that's only survived for you. When I look at you," I take a breath. "Fuck, I see everything I want, all that I need. It's right here, right where it's always been, in you. So, this isn't us having sex," I slowly enter her and her back arches as her body accepts me, I lower to her ear, "this is you finishing what you started. This is you finally stealing my heart, Emmie Rue."

"Jax," she whispers just before I capture her mouth for a long wet kiss. Her lips break from mine. "Jax," she blinks up at me, but it's like in slow motion, "what are you saying?"

"I'm saying," I pull my hips back, and then return to the warmth and wetness coating my cock. "God. You're incredible." I kiss her and even the taste of her mouth steals me. "Princess, I'm sayin' that I'm gonna make love to you. And, hell, I'm not even sure it's gonna be any good. I've never been with someone like this before, but you're getting it. You stole my heart, and now, my little thief, you're going to have to accept your punishment."

"And," her arms reach around my back, a smile slithering across her mouth, "what exactly is my punishment?"

"Well, that'd be," I pause to search her eyes, knowing I'm about to go all fucking balls in here. "My love, and, babe, you may not even want it, but take it or leave it. You own it. You own me, Em."

"Oh-ho," her eyes glisten up at me as her arms tighten around my body, "I'm so taking it." She pulls herself closer. "And anything we do together could be nothing but perfect. So, you go right ahead. You make love to me, Jax Declan." Her lips touch mine, and I delve deeper into her with each rhythmic push. Our bodies unite, merging as one. She is a part of me, just I am a part of her, and together we are whole.

####

####  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

Life hasn't been the same since Jax announced that he was giving me his love. For the past two days, I've been riding cloud nine, holding its soft reins and basking in every heavenly moment. Granted, he didn't say that he loved me, but I get the sense that's what he meant. Right?

Tonight he's working behind the bar, and the girls and I are going to JZS's for a few drinks. I decided to head out early. I have a present for Jax, and I want him to myself for a few minutes before the partying starts. And tonight, I've gone all out. I broke out the sexy gear, the make-up, and the heels, but the only man I plan to tease tonight is Jax Declan. No need wasting my tease on any other, Jax is the only man for me. Now I just have to figure out how this is going to all workout. We haven't discussed the fact that I'll be leaving in a little over a month. It's odd that he hasn't brought it up at all.

I walk into the place and spot my sexy beast behind the bar. Damn, the man wears the hell out of plain t-shirt, and those jeans, like the rest of his clothes, look as if they to love cling to his fine ass and thick thighs. But what wouldn't want to be gripping all those muscles?

He smiles at a customer as he takes the money from her. I can tell the woman is hitting on my man, but he's so savvy about the way he rejects them. Just keeps smiling but doesn't react to their advances. Yeah, I've seen him in action. What Jax doesn't know is that shit turns a girl on. Men aren't the only ones who like a challenge. A few weeks ago, Jax was my challenge and I think that I mighta just managed to break this Declan brother. Task completed.

Making my way to him, I set my purse and his gift on the bar. He sees me and stops what he's doing to give me a real smile. Not the type he hands out at the bar, but the kind that melts a girl's heart. God, I love him.

"Hey, princess," he says, walking over to me.

"Jax," I grin. "Busy tonight," I glance around the bar.

"Yeah," his eyes shift to the bag on the bar as he continues to dry the glass in his hand. "Whatcha got there?"

"A present."

"Someone's birthday tonight?"

"No. It's for you."

"Me?" He sets the glass and the dishrag down on the bar, staring at the bag.

"Open it," I say.

He picks up the bag, gives me scrawled look, then reaches inside, and he starts to laugh as he pulls out my gift.

"A blue ribbon," he chuckles again, holding out the ribbon with a silver number one in the center of it.

"Yeah, I noticed you didn't really have any over your headboard as you boasted." I lean across the bar. "And because you're the best damn pie eater in the Bayou. Hell, no doubt in Galveston County, and maybe even in Texas, I thought you deserved one."

"Em," he chokes back another throaty laugh, "you do know that there's no pie eating contest during the festival, right? Well, there's pie tasting but not pie eating."

"Yes, Jax Declan, I do know that. But you still should get a blue ribbon for your talent."

He laughs again as his near black eyes sparkle at me from across the bar. "Thanks, babe, but I gotta let you know, I'm retiring."

"Excuse me?"

"My pie eating days are over," he says, putting the ribbon back in the bag.

"Not if I have anything to say about it." I try to hold my smile. Jax is going to be eating my pie for a very long time.

"Well, princess," he rests his forearms on the bar and looks up at me from beneath long lashes. "The search is over." He claps his hands together. "See, I finally found my 'just right' pie."

"You did?"

"Yep and this pie isn't too tart, too sweet, or too bitter. The ingredients, every damn one of them, are perfect."

"Sounds like a damn good pie to me."

"She is." His smiling eyes hold me, capturing my breath. "And I don't want her to leave the Bayou. I want her stay here. And if she stays, I promise that I'll provide her a nice warm house with a perfect windowsill to sit on when she needs cooling."

"Jax." I stumble for some returning words, but nothing seems to come out. Deep in my heart, I know this is what I want. What I've ever wanted.

"Hey," he reaches across the bar and grabs my hand, and that damn thumb of his works its magic against my flesh. "You don't need to make a decision now. I just wanted to make sure you knew where I stand and that's right here, where I've always been, and where I'll always be, waiting for you. I shouldn't have let you walk out of my life back then, and now that I've gotten a second chance, babe, I'm going to do everything in my power to keep you."

My heart squeezes and feet tingle, feeling that cloud nine sailing below me, raising me to the very place I've longed to be, with Jax Declan. I go to open my mouth just as I feel an arm drop upon my shoulders.

"Well, hello, love birds," Rayna says above my ear. My eyes snap up at her bad timing. But she must not have caught my fraught girlfriend glance. "What time is the fight starting tonight," she asks Jax as Lurlene comes up alongside her.

Jax's eyes flash to Rayna, then up to the clock on the wall. "Any minute."

"Cool, you gonna watch it with us," she asks me, "or are you staying with loverboy here?"

"I, ah," I look at Jax, and he shrugs.

"Go on with your friends." He winks, picking up the rag and glass from the bar. "We can talk later."

Rayna grabs my arm. "Yeah, come along and play with the girls." She pulls me up from the chair.

"We will talk later, Jax," I say, trying to hint that I'm not going anywhere. I want to stay, and I will hold him to that warm house with a windowsill because when it comes to Jax, this girl will need a lot of cooling. The man makes me so hot, but it's a good hot.

I grab my purse, and we head to the back door.

"Hey," I hear Jax yell. I flip around in my heels. The entire bar must have also heard him because everyone's head turns to look at him, too. Jax sets his hands on the edge of the bar, and then he smiles at me as if we're the only two people in the room. And I smile back. "I love you, Em," he says, loud and unwavering.

"Holy shit," Rayna says with a giggle.

My knees nearly buckle. I reach out for Lurlene, and she holds me up. Never would I take Jax Declan for a man to declare his love in front of an audience. Never. I glance around and every person in the bar is staring at me. And that's when I realize that they're waiting for me to respond.

"You better say something," Lurlene whispers. "Or at least go over there to him, but Emmie, don't leave the poor man hanging."

I take a step forward.

"We'll meet you in the back," Rayna says before her and a snickering Lurlene head through the door.

I slowly walk over to the gorgeous man standing behind the bar as I feel everyone in the room watching me. But my eyes never leave Jax's. I drop my purse on the bar. "Well, it's about time you said it," I say, a smile tugging at my lips. "But really, Jax, did you have to tell the entire bar? I didn't think you were one for an audience."

He lifts his hands with a shrug. "I thought it's what a princess would want," he says, those dark eyes twinkling down at me.

"What," I tilt my head, "to have her knight in shining armor profess his love for her in front of a bar full of people?"

"Hey now," a sexy smile slithers across his delicious mouth, instantly melting my heart. "I'm not claiming to be a knight—"

"Oh, baby," I lean across the bar, "you're no knight, and you're certainly no prince charming." I latch my hand around his neck and pull him to me. "But what woman really wants any of those guys, when she has the best damn pie eater in Galveston County?" I kiss him as I hear the cheering and clapping behind me. I sway back from the kiss with a smile. "And, Jax Declan, I love you, too." My cheeks flush when the clapping gets even louder. I have to admit, gazing into Jax's affectionate eyes, the princess in me secretly loves his romantic gesture.

Rusty leans over and whispers something into Jax's ear. His face goes from elated to anxious.

"What's wrong," I say the look on Jax's face concerns me to the bone.

"Slate's on tonight," he says.

"I thought you said that he wasn't fighting tonight." I glance behind me, knowing Rayna's probably going to have a hard time watching him fight.

"One of the fighters had to cancel so he decided to step in his place."

"Shit," I bite my bottom lip. "I need to get in there for Rayna, but Jax, I want you to know," I tip up and kiss him, again. "We'll work things out. I promise, we will."

"Wait," he grabs my arm, "before you go, there's something that I need to tell you about Slate..."

####

####  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

![A close up of a sign

Description generated with high confidence](images/emmie_name.jpeg)

I push the door open. The music blares. I hear them announcing the fighters. Oh, God! I hope I'm not too late. I'm gonna kill Jax for not telling me sooner. I need to reach Rayna before she sees Slate. My heart slams against my chest as I push my way through the crowd. It feels like it takes forever to reach the front. I see her and Lurlene, and I look up at the ring. Shit! I'm too late.

I grab Rayna's shoulder and spin her around. Dammit. Her eyes are bright red, tears stream down her pasty white face. Her body is shaking. "Emmie," she gasps. "Oh my God!" She lifts a trembling hand over her mouth. "No," she cries. I reach for her, but she pushes me away. "No!" She shakes her hands. "No! No! No!"

"Rayna," I try to grab her. Hold her. Comfort her.

"No!" She clenches my shirt and pulls me against her. "Tell me, Emmie. You tell me right now, what happened to my Slate?"

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"Some boys will keep it, some will break it, and some boys, they just won't want it. You gotta be careful who you give your heart to..." Slate Declan

First loves, we all got them. Mine is Slate Declan. He was kind, gentle, and caring. Still, he managed to break my heart. So I put miles between us, and eventually, my heart healed.

I haven't seen Slate in years, but a couple friends and I are going back to the Bayou for the summer. While I'm visiting my hometown, I'm going to look up Slate Declan. And I plan to break his heart, just as he did mine. I'll remind him of what he has lost, and then I'll prove to him that I've moved on.

It should be real easy, right?

Well, let me tell you, Slate Declan is not the same guy that I left behind. And there's another problem. How do you break someone's heart when they no longer have one?

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My eyelids slowly descend, body tingling all over; my muscles drop, and my skin starts to itch. Fucking finally, those damn hydros I popped are kickin' in. I settle into the chair and rest my head against the wall. Just as I'm about to give into the high, I hear a sweet little voice.

"Hey. What happened?"

Lids heavy, as if someone's holding them down, I struggle to open my eyes. I find a blue-eyed, blond-haired girl standing in front of me in a t-shirt with a glittery butterfly on it. She's five, maybe six. I stare at her, unsure if she's real or just a drug-induced figment of my imagination.

"What happened," she asks again, pointing her tiny finger at me. "Right there?"

Not needing to look at what she's referring to, I smile. "I was kissed by the devil."

"Huh." She rests her hands on her hips. "That devil, he must really like you. He sure did kiss you a lot." Her face scrunches up as if she smelled something raunchy. "It's ugly."

Gotta love kids. They always speak the truth. "Yeah, it sure ain't pretty," I agree.

"Nah, I wouldn't worry about it." She waves a hand at me. "My momma says that no matter what, she'll always love me."

I gaze down at her through weighted lids. "Well, kid, I ain't got no momma."

"What about a wife?" She tilts her head. "Got one of those, they're supposed to love you no matter what, too."

"Nope, ain't got one of those either."

"Uh-oh, mister." Her eyes go wide. "What are you gonna do," she says as though I'm just too damn ugly for anyone to love. Hell, not only is she honest, but the little shit's smart, too.

I grin down at her. "Well, I guess I'm just gonna have to keep hanging out with that devil, now ain't I."

"No way, mister. I wouldn't, not if he's gonna keep kissin' ya like that."

I laugh, hearing the girl's mother calling after her. The girl offers me a short wave then she turns and runs over to the mother who's gonna love her no matter what. I chuckle again, lower my heavy lids, and finally give in to the effects of the hydros...

Also by

KELLY GENDRON

DARING THE KANE BROTHERS

TOKEN

STEELE

BREAKING THE DECLAN BROTHERS

JAX

SLATE

ZEKE

A TOUBLEMAKER NOVEL

Broken Fences

Favorite Places

Finder Fees

Lucky Numbers

Lost Wishes

From Siren Publishing:

Fatal Promise

From Red Sage Publishing:

The Forbidden Claim

The Risqué Target

Satisfying the Curse
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