MATT: Good evening, everyone, and welcome to
tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch
of nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play
Dungeons and Dragons. My name is Matthew Mercer. I
am the dungeon master for the show, and we're
excited to have you. A couple of cool things about
this, for those who are checking in or aren't
aware of what's going on: our main party, Vox
Machina, has been split for two different trials.
We'll get into that story in a little bit, but
because of that, we have some guests playing. This
will be the second week of our two fantastic
guests, Wil Wheaton and Will Friedle. We're
excited about them. They're pretty nice. This is
the second week of the Wills; we're excited to
have them. Also, do we have any other
announcements anyone wants to talk about? Anything
crazy coming up?
MARISHA: Speaking of the Wills, just to talk about
the first two giveaways that we reached. That's
it. Once it hits the board, it's done. It's like
the American flag. These are TableTop nail
wrap-specific.
WIL: Oh yeah, these are from our friends at
Espionage Cosmetics.
MARISHA: Yes, these are Espionage Cosmetics nail
wraps, and they're actual TableTop--
WIL: Yeah, they're official licensed TableTop
merchandise that we made happen. I'm very happy.
MARISHA: So yes. Wear the support on your
fingertips.
WIL: I have two announcements. Announcement the
first: for the next four hours and 56 minutes,
Pacific Time, I am the King of the Internet
because I won yesterday on @Midnight.
MATT: Congratulations!
WIL: Also, Hardwick hipped me to this movie that I
want everybody to see, so I'm telling everyone I
know about it, and I won't shut up about it. It's
called What We Do in the Shadows. It is a comedy
that is a documentary about a group of vampires
who live together in a house in
Wellington, New Zealand.
MATT: Oh wait, is this the one that has Jemaine
Clement in it?
WIL: Yeah.
MATT: Yeah, I've heard of this.
WIL: It is one of the most amazing, hilarious,
pitch-perfect, well-done genre comedy and horror
films I have ever seen. It is a delight, and I
want everyone to watch it because I'm afraid it's
not going to get the attention it deserves.
WILL: This is a new movie? This isn't something
from years ago?
WIL: From this year, yeah.
MATT: This episode sponsored by What We Do-- no,
I'm kidding.
ORION: Tomorrow, Friday, on Gather Your Party, I
had a thumbtack comedy buddy, Alex Lewis, and
Keith Habersberger--
MATT: That's not a real name.
ORION: I know. From Buzzfeed. Together, they are
Lewberger, and they're going to be playing here,
and I'm going to be doing some songs with them and
performing with them, as well. Check it out for
Gather Your Party tomorrow. What time is that,
sorry Zac?
ZAC: 7:00PM.
ORION: 7:00PM.
MATT: Tomorrow. Wondrous.
LIAM: I would like to announce that I am nervous
as shit.
MATT: Why? I can't imagine why you would be.
WIL: Is it because you're sitting so close to me
that you're worried that you're not going to roll
anything well tonight?
LIAM: No. I should feel comfortable that you're
going to soak it all up.
WIL: Look, you're the regular. I'm the guest star.
I can die, and it's fine.
WILL: It's not fine.
WIL: It doesn't matter. No, it'll be dramatic and
great. I plan to sacrifice my life for someone in
this group who deserves it.
ZAC: Spoilers!
MARISHA: Hopefully you don't fail at that, too.
ALL: Oh!
WIL: Not for you!
WILL: Wow.
WIL: Not for you. No, not for you!
WILL: It's a hug-worthy moment. This is a good
day.
MARISHA: Only because of the dice, not because of
your choices.
WIL: Too late!
LIAM: Come on, guys. Just like we did in
rehearsals.
(laughter)
MARISHA: So 826LA, our charity. Everyone should go
check them out; they have amazing storefronts in
cities all across the country. The one here is
themed after time travel in Echo Park. And also in
Marina Del Rey; that's the other city that I'm
trying to think of. But yes, a portion of all of
our donations go to them, and they're amazing, so
thank you so much. And thank you for everyone who
has donated in the past. We love you. And I think
we are going to be doing a video. I know I've been
saying that for a while, but we have a date
scheduled now! It is happening. We have a way for
everyone to get back in town, but it's going to
happen, and we're going to have a field trip.
MATT: Yeah, to 826 and deliver all your wonderful
donations. Last announcement I have to make. Let's
see. The wonderful folks at Midnight Syndicate--
for those who don't know who they are, they make
fantastic music and soundtrack tracks. They've
done an official DND soundtrack years ago, and
they've done stuff for World of Darkness and Call
of Cthulhu. They do great atmospheric music. They
finally got back to me, and they gave me
permission to use their songs on this feed, so my
playlist expands even further. They're really
cool guys.
MARISHA: How long ago did you send that e-mail?
MATT: That was a while back. It was before we
started the stream. But they responded, and
they've been really cool about it, and if you're
looking for your own soundtrack stuff to work on,
they have a great array of stuff. I highly
recommend checking out Midnight Syndicate.
WILL: Are you still trying to get Queen, too?
MATT: I'm trying, but Freddie hasn't returned my
e-mails.
WIL: Hey, guys? This is weird. He's not going to
return your emails. No. He's not a fan.
LIAM: He's more into Shadowrun.
WIL: He's really a Shadowrun guy.
MATT: That's okay, Shadowrun's cool.
WIL: Very much a Shadowrun guy.
ORION: I played that on Genesis.
LIAM: We need to build bleachers back here. We've
got this thing.
MATT: We lost Wheaton.
WILL: All right, so now we got a shot!
LIAM: Well, step into camera if you're going to
make such a big to-do. Come in and say hi, and
then get out. You already pulled Wil out of the
picture.
MATT: Thorbir died really fast tonight. Yay, we
got a Laura!
WIL: And by the way, unlike Thorbir, I did not
trip over anything or fall down trying to go down
one step.
MATT: That's true.
WIL: Just so we don't mistake the actor for the
character.
MATT: Indeed. There's a distinction. It is a
creative character. No buckets were harmed in the
announcement here. All right, so. I think if we're
all ready, let's go ahead--
WIL: Oh, I don't have a pencil.
MATT: You don't have a pencil? I'm going to throw
a pencil at you.
WIL: Throw a pencil at me, dungeon master!
MATT: I mean, gingerly hand it to our fantastic
overlord, who will deliver it.
MARISHA: Oh, are we going into our intro?
MATT: Yeah, so let's go ahead and get ready to
play ourselves some Critical Role.
[dramatic music]
MATT: Welcome back. As we left off last time, to
give you a little backstory: Vox Machina, put into
some sort of legal trouble in the city of
Vasselheim, found themselves breaking a contract
for a guild called the Slayer's Take that was
essentially a monster hunters' guild, and all
kills near the city of this magnitude required
approval. So to make sure they weren't sent to the
seat of judgment to essentially be arrested and/or
tried for this infraction they didn't realize they
made, they were given the opportunity to actually
join the guild, which they chose to do. However,
as part of joining it, they had to go through a
small trial, in which the party was split and had
to go off to their own smaller contracts. One half
had journeyed through with our guests Mary
Elizabeth McGlynn and Felicia Day, and they went
after a white dragon. They were awesome. Everyone
survived, barely. It was pretty rough. And this
adventuring party met as the second contract and
were given the task to seek out and destroy and
harvest pieces from a rakshasa, a demonic entity
that stems from the Nine Hells and apparently was
somewhere in the city masquerading as the
assistant to the owner of the Velvet Cabaret, an
establishment for upper-class pleasure-seekers.
The party, after essentially forcing this
individual to reveal themself, the rakshasa fled
through a tunnel underneath its room into a long
subterranean tunnel fraught with traps that were
set to protect it. The party managed to avoid
these rather deftly until the steady decline of
the hallway, combined with the increasing moisture
and scent of refuse, caused a slick surface, and
our fantastic cleric, Brother Kashaw, slipped and
fell down. Two party members, Keyleth and
Tiberius, decided it'd be a fun time to go
slip-n-sliding, joined him at the bottom of the
tunnel, where Thorbir and Vax stayed at the top,
shaking their heads with frustration. Upon
splashing down into what appeared to be some sort
of underground cistern or a collection of compost
and refuse that had been just rotting food and all
kinds of nasty stuff, the party pulled themselves
up, nearly waist-deep in this nasty substance.
Began to hear skittering and screeching sounds
throughout the room-- hundreds of small ones--
while two large thorny tentacles jettisoned out of
this, call it a dung heap if you want, and pulled
itself to the surface, with a central body filled
with teeth and one giant toothy maw. And that was
where we left off. So. In the nature of that, I
would like everyone to roll initiative.
WIL: Even those of us that are very quietly
walking slowly? Okay.
MATT: You can continue slowly on your turn, if
you'd like. That's entirely up to you.
WILL: Natural 20! Plus two.
MARISHA: Good start.
ORION: I'll take it. That's 20 for me.
WIL: Well, I guess that just leaves me, then.
MARISHA: Come on, Wil.
WIL: Two.
(laughter)
MATT: And they're off!
WILL: We pick up where we left off.
LIAM: We never left.
WILL: MIT is just going, come on.
MATT: As a note, because I forgot, guys. For subs
tonight, every hundred subscribers we get, one
person in the chat will be chosen to win a signed
cast picture and a signed poster of one of our
artists, Kit Buss's wonderful art pieces for
Critical Role, signed by us, as well.
MARISHA: And Espionage Cosmetic nail wraps!
MATT: So we got some cool giveaways. Forgot that
at the top. Anyway. 20 and up?
WILL: 22.
ORION: 20.
MATT: All right. Ten to 15?
LIAM: 13.
MATT: 13? All right.
WIL: I don't know if you have numbers low enough.
Two.
MATT: Keyleth, what do you have?
MARISHA: Six.
MATT: Six, okay. All right. As the skittering
seems to go to a fervored frenzy, you can see masses
and masses of extremely matted fur moving and
quivering through this refuse as a series of rat
swarms pour out of the edges of this giant dung
pile. And where at the center that giant entity
has revealed itself to be a terrifying visage of
some kind. I'm going to have you go ahead and roll
an arcana check.
ORION: 22.
MATT: 22. Immediately, as soon as this creature
comes out (squelch), this horrible guttural
bubbling sound its throat makes as it pulls itself
out of this nasty collection of refuse. You've
read of this in quite a few tomes before in your
travels. This is known as an otyugh.
ORION: A what?
MATT: An otyugh.
ORION: Oh. Nasty things, these otyughs.
MATT: Usually riddled with disease, they're
controlled garbage disposals for those that can keep
control of them. And it is Kashaw's turn.
WILL: Do we get to know how dangerous they are to
us?
MATT: You currently have no idea.
WILL: Are these creatures dangerous to us?
ORION: Yes.
WILL: So should we just try to get rid of
everything right now, then, as it were?
ORION: They're not even there yet.
WILL: They're not with us at all yet, are they?
MATT: About 15 feet up, you can see the opening of
the tunnel where you guys slipped out, and you
have no visual sight of the rest of your party--
which, you guys were left in darkness, by the way.
You can see. You have dim light, so you're fine.
ORION: Whatever you do, don't go up next to it
right now.
WILL: Yeah, can I cast some light? Turn on some
light and see what we can see down there?
MATT: Well, he still has his Light spell.
WILL: Oh, we're still lit up? Oh, okay. Good.
MATT: You can see this creature now. (growls)
WILL: Okay. Now, is there any chance that any kind
of spell that I cast could hurt them, even though
we can't see where they are?
MATT: It depends on the spell's radius. If it's
relatively small, then probably not. They're not
even within visual range, so you'd really have to
try hard to hit them at this point.
WILL: And how about the rest of us, though? How
close are we to this thing and this cylinder?
MATT: You guys are all about ten feet away from this
giant creature right now.
WILL: Yeah, that's a pretty tight thing. Okay. You
know what, I think I'm going to try to at least
slow this thing down as much as I can before
everybody else gets down here. I think that's the
best thing to do is just slow it down. I'd like to
cast Sacred Flame.
MATT: Sacred Flame.
WIL: Kash money.
MARISHA: (laughs) Kash money.
MATT: (laughs) Kash money. All right, so go ahead
and look at the spell.
What's it require from you?
WILL: Let's see, it's one action.
MATT: Okay, so the target makes a dexterity saving
throw. Let's see if it makes this. What is your
spell DC?
WILL: My spell DC?
MATT: Should be at the top of your spell list.
WILL: Where is that? Oh, I see what you're saying.
Yeah, okay. It's a 16.
MATT: 16. Okay, it does not make it. As you bring
out your holy symbol for a moment from beneath
your armor, you look forward and thrust your spear
forward. This energy travels from the middle of
your torso, across your arm, down the spear, and
fires off as this burst of vibrant whitish-blue
light that blasts into the front of this otyugh
creature. You deal 3d8 damage to it. So go ahead
and roll eight-sided dice three times.
WILL: Eight. Now we need the full set, right?
MARISHA: Wait, they're all here. Here's an eight.
WILL: All right, I got the eight here.
WIL: If you need to roll a one, you can use one of
mine.
MARISHA: Wait, that's a ten. That's a ten-sider.
This one.
WILL: So three, right? Here we go.
MARISHA: Big money, no whammies.
WILL: That's all right. Eight and five and four.
MARISHA: That's really good.
MATT: Eight and five and four. 17 damage. (impact,
growling) You can see now it has the two giant
tentacles with these jagged spines that look
covered in whatever it's been climbing in and this
one central stalk that has eyes across it, and
the eyes flicker in pain and wince and then
focus in on you and looks across your companions.
Do you wish to move, or do you want to stay where
you are?
WILL: Yeah, I would like to move. Once I've
struck, I'd like to get at least a little bit
farther away from it to try to distract it from
the opening where these guys might be coming down,
so the opposite side of the opening where these
guys might drop in.
MATT: Okay, so you can try and move closer this
way, probably. You're now adjacent to one of the
rat swarms, but you're pulling it away from the
entrance here.
LIAM: Are they rats or are they ROUS's?
MATT: It looks like normal-sized rats. Not that
you would know, because you're not in the room,
but there's clusters and clusters of these rats
swarming over each other.
WILL: Were any of them affected at all by the
Sacred Flame?
MATT: No, it's just the singular target, but if
you have things that hit larger areas, they can
hit multiple guys. That ends your turn. Next up is
Tiberius.
ORION: I can move first, right?
MATT: You can, yes.
ORION: I'll move around next to Kashaw.
MATT: Next to him? Okay, you will get free strikes
from both the rat swarms, currently, because
you'll be passing through there and out of their
melee range. You cool with that?
ORION: No, I'm not. Can I take a step back?
MATT: You can. This guy will still get an attack
of opportunity on you.
ORION: Really? I thought I could move five feet.
MATT: You can use an action to disengage.
ORION: Okay. I won't do anything. Here's what I'm
going to do instead. I'm sorry, I don't know what
was wrong. I've been off, and I apologize for how
I've been sounding. What I'm going to do is I'm
going to lift my finger and I'm going to aim
behind that three-headed bastard and I'm going to
release a 4th-level Fireball.
MATT: Over here?
ORION: Yes.
MATT: Show me with your laser pointer where you
want the impact to be.
ORION: Behind him where it won't hurt Keyleth and
will just hurt him. Wherever that is.
MATT: Okay. I'd say that'd probably be right
around this area here.
ORION: I'm going to immediately spend two sorcery
points and quicken spell, and I'm going to turn
around and do three Scorching Rays to follow up
the Fireball right at that dude, each head.
MATT: Okay.
ORION: I'm going to, on that spell, spend
another--
MATT: Wait up, let's do the Fireball first.
ORION: Okay.
MATT: One thing at a time. So as you use your
ring, you focus. The ray streaks past. Slams into
the wall behind (explosion sound) with a deafening
roar, and you guys definitely hear this. The
hallway in the distance suddenly brightens up, and
you can see a bit of flame roll up, and the scent
of smoke comes wafting past you as a wave of heat
blasts through the tunnel.
LIAM: Yeah, he does that.
MATT: What's the DC on your spells?
ORION: 17.
MATT: Does not make the save, so full damage on
the otyugh.
ORION: Wonderful, so let's see. Here's a six.
MATT: That rat swarm would also be hit.
ORION: Here's a five. Okay, so I'm going to now--
MATT: What's the damage on the Fireball?
ORION: Hold on, I'm going to spend one sorcery
point to empower the spell, and I'm going to pick
the six and reroll these four dice, because I can
reroll up to that many when I empower. For that
damage. Perfect. What's the total for that, guys?
MATT: (singing) Math. Wizard math.
WIL: Math has no power here.
LIAM: Math is for everybody, guys. Really.
ORION: What is that? Nine. That's 24. And then
(counting).
MATT: We're going to pimp out a calculator for him
one day.
MARISHA: Yes, abacus.
ORION: 48.
MATT: 48 points of damage. Boom. All right. Well.
After the fireball explosion settles, you can see
there's a big char mark in the front of it. Some
of its teeth have been blown into the inside of
its mouth. The rat swarm behind Keyleth is
completely incinerated with a hundred-squeak
screeches, and you can smell charred fur and hair
and flesh in the air.
MARISHA: Oh, you burned my new robes! Ugh.
ORION: So I'm going to do that. Okay, and then the
Scorching Ray happens. And I'm going to heighten
that spell, which gives you disadvantage against
the save? Is that what I want to do? Yeah, that's
what I'm going to do.
LIAM: It feels like you just did 17 things.
MATT: Well, no. You have to make a ranged spell
attack for each one.
There is no saving throw for it.
ORION: Oh. Actually, I don't do that, then. I
don't spend those points. I was supposed to do
True Strike to make that work. d20s, right?
MATT: Yep, so roll for each ray.
ORION: Wonderful. Yeah, they all hit. I got a 14,
an 18, a 19, and my
spell attack bonus is plus 11.
MATT: Okay. They all hit.
(laughter)
WIL: I saw that DM move of, I'll tell you if it
hits. I felt that.
MATT: It was there, and he was right. 6d6 fire
damage.
ORION: Ooh, that's gross, and I'm going to empower
that spell, as well. So it's four, and I'm going
to pick four out of these six-- no! I rolled a
six. (counts quietly) 29.
MATT: 29? All righty. As each ray (impact sounds),
you can see the flashing of the flaming light in
the air. This darkened room is suddenly
illuminated in bursts as each of these rays of
burning fire go blasting into the side of the
otyugh. It's nearly pushed back into the pile that
it pulled itself from, but steadies itself. Does
that end your turn?
ORION: Yes, it does.
MATT: All right. Tiberius's turn has come to an
end.
MARISHA: I've knitted a sweater while Tiberius
took his turn.
MATT: All right. Next up is the otyugh, who is
extremely unhappy with how that went down.
(growls) You now see as it pulls from the front of
its body one giant backwards-looking elephant leg
that steps into the front of the material, a
second one, forward. It pulls itself completely
out of the pile, and you can see a third one, like
a giant tripod. These thick legs carry it forward.
It is going to do a bite attack and a tentacle
attack on you, and a tentacle attack on Keyleth,
as you're the nearest to it. So as it rears back
with its mouth, this giant maw opens with all
these nasty jagged broken teeth, and the smell
that comes out of its mouth is horrifying, even
for your experience as a dragonborn. That would
be... 18 to hit.
ORION: Did you roll at disadvantage?
MATT: Why would I have disadvantage?
ORION: Cloak of Displacement?
MATT: Oh! Good call. Oh, that's even higher. 19.
But thank you for the reminder;
that's good to know.
ORION: AC is 18.
MATT: So it hits.
LIAM: Now go home and get your shine box.
MATT: So as you're hanging back and your image is
shifting and shimmering nearby, its mouth is just
too big, and as it bites down, while it would have
partially hit the side, it manages to find your
proper location. The teeth clomp down onto you.
You take 16 points of piercing damage. As you
(grunts) reach back in pain, you push yourself out
of its mouth. I need you to make a constitution
saving throw.
ORION: 22.
MATT: 22. Okay, so you pull off and away. You can
see where it dragged across your scales, it left
this nasty trail of black-- whatever you would
call it, saliva-- but you manage to slip it off
your hand, and you feel like it's probably not
going to bother you too much. However, as you
steady yourself, one of the tentacles comes
swinging down towards you. That is also with
disadvantage. That would be a 21 to hit.
ORION: Yeah, that hits.
MATT: All right. You take seven points of
bludgeoning damage from the impact. That's only
four points of piercing damage as the spines slam
into your side and seem to stick onto you. You are
also considered grappled and restrained for the
time, as the tentacle wraps around you and the
spines are digging into your body. It now has you
by your waist and is holding you in place.
ORION: This is fun. How much damage is that,
total?
MATT: That'd be a total of 11 damage.
ORION: Really? Plus the other damage?
MATT: Plus the bite, no. Did you not write down
the bite damage I told you?
ORION: That's 16, so 26? 27. So what's half of
that?
MATT: Half of that?
ORION: Because of the Stoneskin. My Stoneskin is
still up.
MATT: Stoneskin is still up. That is correct. How
long does that last?
ORION: Hour?
MATT: Hour. Yeah, that should've lasted long
enough. You're fine, yeah. So half of that
would've been--
ORION: I cast that when we were chasing him--
MATT: Yeah. 13 points of damage.
ORION: Okay. 13 points.
MATT: That was a lot of technicality in one turn.
Well done, Tiberius. All right.
WIL: Spellcasters.
MATT: That will be a 23 against you.
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: That turn's done. That'll be a total of 14
points of bludgeoning damage to you and five
points of piercing damage, and you are also
grappled by the other tentacles here. You are both
currently being held to the sides of the
creature.
MARISHA: 14 and five, you said?
MATT: Correct. That brings us to Vax.
LIAM: We're how high up from here?
MATT: About 15 feet up, and you're that far back.
LIAM: We're that far back? All right, so it takes
my whole movement just to run to the edge
probably, yeah?
MATT: (counting) Yeah, pretty close, right there.
That's your turn?
LIAM: And that's it? Bonus action, right?
MATT: Bonus action if you want it, yeah.
LIAM: But I can't see. Can I see past the lip of
the edge to the top of that?
MATT: Whatever you're trying to hit might have
three-quarters cover.
LIAM: (sighs) That's it.
MATT: Okay. That ends your turn. Now the swarms.
Moving in. Each one of these rats swarms start
crawling up towards your body, and they're
starting to find their way into your armor, and
they're biting. It's a terrible experience. Swarm
attacking Keyleth is going to be a 16 to hit.
MARISHA: Nope.
MATT: Nope. You brush them off yourself.
MARISHA: I look at them and I go, (rat noises).
MATT: (laughs) The rat whisperer. Attacking you,
Brother Kash. That looks like it's going to be a
ten to hit?
WILL: Okay, so now what?
MATT: What's your armor class?
WILL: My armor class is where? There. It's 20.
MATT: 20. These rats come forward and you (whack)
knock them out of the way with your shield.
Against Tiberius, that is going to be, with
disadvantage--
ORION: Man, they can't touch me. I'm up in the
air, yo.
MATT: You're grappled, but you're not floating in
the air.
ORION: Aw man, I thought he was whipping me
around.
MATT: Not yet.
MARISHA: (laughs) Not yet.
MATT: That's going to be a 13, so it's going to
miss you. So the rats, no effect yet. That ends
their turn. Keyleth, you're up.
MARISHA: I take the tentacle that's grappled
around me and I grab onto it, and I cast Blight.
MATT: All right.
MARISHA: It has to make a constitution saving
throw.
MATT: What level is Blight? Blight is 4th?
MARISHA: 3rd.
MATT: All right, constitution saving throw. That
is an 11. What's your DC?
I'm pretty sure it fails.
MARISHA: 18.
MATT: Okay, it takes 8d8 necrotic damage. Go ahead
and roll damage.
MARISHA: Yes, it does.
WILL: Nice work.
MARISHA: Where'd all my d8s go?
WILL: You gave them to me. You very nicely gave
them to me.
MARISHA: Here's one. Ooh, there's four, so five,
six. Seven. I just like rolling all of them I
could roll. Okay. That's all right. There's ten,
there's 20, there's 35. Sorry. Yes, 36 damage.
MATT: 36 damage.
MARISHA: Yes.
MATT: Nice! As you grab the tentacle, you can see
the slippery, slimy flesh, and it has the residue
on it. As your fingers grasp into it, its
brownish-yellow color all of a sudden turns into
this grayish sickly dried landscape, as you can
see the flesh cracking to dust around it. The
tentacle's still grasping onto you. The magical
energy travels up the side of what would be its
torso and body, and you can see it beginning to
withdraw through severe pain. It manages to
eventually shrug off any further spread of the
magical disease, of the Blight, but it has left
this horrible scarring across one side of its
whole body. You can't really move this turn, since
you're currently restrained.
MARISHA: It's fine.
MATT: Yep. All right. That brings us to Thorbir.
What you got?
WIL: I'm going to continue down this corridor to
get close to the half-elf.
MATT: That's a full round of movement there.
WIL: That's all I can do. Leave something for me!
MATT: All right, that ends that. That's going to
bring us to the top. Kashaw. Your turn.
WILL: Is the side that she damaged useless at this
point? The one tentacle?
MATT: No, it's still functional, still wrapped
around her. There's scarring across it and a large
part of its upper torso. Torso. It's weird to say
parts of its body when it has that strange
construction.
WIL: Don't attach your body norms to it, man.
MATT: (laughs) I apologize.
LIAM: Are you body-shaming that otyugh?
WILL: Shouldn't we? I'd like to move as much
directly in front of the creature as possible.
MATT: Okay. That'll get you there. That one rat
swarm does get a free attack on you as you move
past it. That is going to be an 11. You can see
the rats swarming up your legs and trying to get
past, but the armor's too thick and the chain
mail's too strong underneath the plate you have,
and you brush them off as you move to the side.
Pulls you right up in front of it, now. Its giant
mouth is (chomping sounds) angrily gnashing and
biting down in front of you, and it's sending bits
of that brackish spittle across your face and
smells horrifying. What are you doing?
WILL: I'd like to try to take control of it with
Geas. See if I can tell this bitch what to do.
MARISHA: Do it!
WILL: Not you.
MARISHA: I was hoping you weren't talking about
me.
WILL: I'd never call you bitch.
MATT: Okay, the casting time for Geas is one
minute.
WILL: Okay.
MATT: Knowing that, every combat round is
equivalent to six seconds, so you could try it. It
probably won't survive that long, but hold onto
that spell for now. Is there another one you'd
like to use?
WILL: I will hold onto that. Yeah. I think then
I'm going to try... How about just another Sacred
Flame for now?
MATT: Sure. Go ahead and roll to attack, sir. No,
this one it just makes its saving throw. I forgot.
All right, cool. It's going to attempt at making
another dexterity saving throw. That is a 14, and
that does not beat it, so go ahead and roll 3d8
points of damage to it. Radiant damage. Tiberius,
you're on deck.
MARISHA: Oh, nice. Not bad.
WILL: 16.
MATT: 16 points of damage, nice. Yes. (impact
sounds) Once again, the flames burst up, and you
can see parts of its body where the scarring is
across it all of a sudden explode with light, and
beneath you can see the freshly exposed
grayish-brown fleshy muscle beneath its outer
armored structure. It is looking a little rough.
That ends your turn. That brings us to Tiberius.
ORION: He's got me like this, right? Yeah, sure.
I'm going to cast True Strike on him. Cantrip.
MATT: True Strike on yourself?
ORION: On him.
MATT: On him.
ORION: I'm going to look for a weakness. That'll
give me advantage on my next--
MATT: Attack roll against the target? Okay.
ORION: Then I'm going to quicken spell and spend
two more sorcery points to cast-- well, I'm going
to look over. Can I see where Vax and him are
coming?
MATT: Currently, no. There is so much going on in
the room, and the only light source is you right
now. You have no inclination that they're even at
the top at this point, and you're currently
wrapped in a tentacle and being swarmed by rats.
You have no way of telling that they've even
arrived at this point.
ORION: I can see behind the creature, though,
because that's within range. So I will do Misty
Step behind him and get out of that grip.
MATT: All righty. Misty Step is a 2nd-level?
ORION: Yes.
MATT: All right. To where do you want to go?
ORION: As far away behind him as I can go.
MATT: There you go.
ORION: And that is my turn.
MATT: All righty. Ending your turn, the otyugh
turns around angrily. Now it looks, it has its
empty tendril. It's going to step away. You do get
one, Brother Kash, as it steps away. You get one
free attack with your spear as it tries to move
away from you.
WILL: Okay.
MATT: So go ahead and roll an attack with your
spear.
WILL: That is a d20? 14.
MATT: Plus your attack bonus.
WILL: Attack bonus is--
MARISHA: Oh, plus nine.
MATT: Oh, that definitely hits. So go ahead and
roll damage for the spear.
WILL: Damage for the spear?
MARISHA: Which is 1d8 plus three.
WILL: 1d8 plus three. Where's my d8? Ten.
MATT: So as it moves away (stomping sounds) you
reach out and (whoosh) hit it with the spear,
leaving this big old gaping wound in the side
where more of its dark blood begins to spill out
from the wound. As it moves over, it's going to go
ahead and do one bite attack towards Keyleth with
its open mouth. That's going to be a 24.
MARISHA: That hits.
MATT: All right. That's going to be 16 points of
piercing damage to you, and make a constitution
saving throw.
MARISHA: 16.
MATT: 16. You can feel the diseased liquid that
fills the inside of the otyugh's mouth begin to
pulse into your arm for a second. You tense, and
eventually the pain and numbness tends to fade
within a few seconds. However, as you take that
moment to yourself, as it's still grabbing you
with the one tentacle, it's going to reach and
attack twice towards Tiberius.
That is going to be a 16?
ORION: Nope.
MATT: Okay. That'll be a 19.
ORION: Yes.
MATT: So the second one hits you. That is eight
points of bludgeoning damage and five points, so
13. Half that because of Stoneskin. That puts you
at seven points of damage. And you are once again
grappled and wrapped up by it.
ORION: I think he likes me!
MATT: I think you pissed it off when you set it on
fire multiple times in a row.
WILL: We could use a little help down here!
LIAM: Coming!
MATT: That ends its turn. Vax, you're up.
LIAM: Okay. I'm going to run up to the edge of it.
Are any of my friends
right up against this nasty shit?
MATT: Currently, Keyleth is right next to it.
LIAM: Keyleth. So if it's occupied with my friend,
I can take a second, aim really well, and sneak
attack from up here. Okay, so that is 24.
MATT: 24? That hits, definitely.
LIAM: All right, so sneak attack.
MARISHA: Oh good, you showed up!
LIAM: That's a two plus nine. This is Keen Dagger.
Nine. Plus 12, 17, 21. That's 21. 30.
MATT: 30 points of damage. All right.
LIAM: And the second dagger, which is
Life-Stealing, hits with a 24.
MATT: That hits, definitely.
LIAM: That is eight.
MATT: Eight. All right. You still have the rest of
your movement if you want to stay up there or wish
to move somewhere.
LIAM: Nope, just going to perch.
MATT: Okay, cool. All right.
MATT: Ending Vax's turn, the rats now move up.
This one is going to go there, attacking Keyleth.
You are currently restrained. Tiberius, you are
also restrained, so attacks against you have
advantage. That'll be a 19 against you.
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: Against Tiberius, it just has a general
attack roll because you give it disadvantage on
attacks. That is going to be a 17, which I think
misses you. All right. Keyleth, you take nine
points of piercing damage as the rats are now
swarming up over the side of the tentacle and
biting at your neck and shoulder area, and you're
trying to brush them off of you.
MARISHA: No! (squeaking noises)
MATT: Rats aren't your friends anymore. That
finishes their turn. It is now your turn,
Keyleth.
MARISHA: My turn? Okay, are rats swarming me?
MATT: Yep.
MARISHA: This guy's looking pretty close to dead,
yeah?
MATT: He's looking pretty hurt.
MARISHA: He's looking pretty hurt? I'm going to do
it again. I'm going to do Blight again.
MATT: Blight again against this guy?
MARISHA: Yeah. I'm still grappled, right?
MATT: You are, yes.
MARISHA: So just same thing, I'm just going to
(sucking sound) try and
suck the life out of this guy.
MATT: All right.
MARISHA: Constitution saving throw.
MATT: That is going to be a 13.
MARISHA: (laughs, counts) I need one more, where's
it at? Big money, no whammies. Ooh, that's not
bad. Okay, so that's 14, 15, 16, 24, 30, 32, 35,
41, 45.
MATT: 45 points of damage from Blight. So this
time, as the rats are swarming over you, you reach
up your hands. They're glowing with the energy
that you're drawing from this. You can see the
actual air around her hands beginning to turn
black and the air is beginning to be pulled in.
What was once a very moist and warm vicinity gets
strangely cold as now her hands embody the end of
life. She grasps the tentacle, and the rats
scatter as the proximity grows. As you touch it,
you can see now what was once the Blight's
scarring begins to fill the entire tentacle, and as
it turns, it hardens around you, almost like a
brittle piece of concrete. The rest of its body
(cracking) you see it begins to (roars), starts
thrashing about. Its tendril releases you,
Tiberius, dropping you into a pile of refuse. As
it reaches around to try and grasp its own
tentacle, (shattering sound) it breaks through its
own arm. As it reels back, you fall onto your
butt, the rest of the broken pieces of otyugh
crumbling into dust around you. You look up and
see the creature as it attempts to back up, each
one of its legs pulling up against the one door
that's partially buried in the far corner. It
slams into the side as the Blight spreads across
its body. Its teeth begin to shatter and turn to
dust within its mouth, which begins to slowly curl
inward as it ages extremely rapidly in a short
period of time. Suddenly, it slumps to the ground,
(gurgling sound) and joins the refuse of which it
once came from.
MARISHA: Dead?
MATT: Thorbir?
WIL: You were supposed to save something for me!
ORION: There's a bunch of rats down here!
WIL: Rats!
WILL: Walk faster.
WIL: (clunk clunk) To the edge, there. How far
down is it?
MATT: 15 feet. And it is soft ground.
WIL: Can I jump and land on those rats?
MATT: You know what? Sure. Go ahead and make an
athletics check.
MARISHA: Come on. You can do it.
WIL: Okay. 17.
MARISHA: It's rats!
MATT: You leap, slam down on top of the rat swarm
that just jettisoned off the side of Keyleth. I'm
going to say for that impact, go ahead and roll
1d6. It takes 1d6 bludgeoning damage from you
stepping on a few of the rats.
WIL: Six.
MATT: Six! All righty. And they're now all around
you on the ground and they're trying to swarm away
from the impact zone. You still have your action.
WIL: Okay, so. I haven't played a character this
high-level in this system, so bear with me while I
walk through this. I believe that I can attack
three times in a round, right? I have the extra
attack feature?
MATT: Yes, as a fighter, you do. You have three
attacks.
WIL: Okay, so I'm going to take my axe and just
try to kill as many of these things as I possibly
can. So I swing my axe.
MATT: All right.
WIL: And I roll a two.
MATT: All right, you swing your axe for the first
batch of rats. Unfortunately, it's hard to see
where the compost pile and the rats separate. You
cleave through a bunch of the slimy mess, slinging
a bunch of it against the wall, and as you spatter
a bit against Keyleth, who's behind you. Roll for
your next attack.
WIL: Very unhappy about that. Okay, three. How's
that hole looking? It's a great hole, right?
MATT: You decide, as opposed to a small swath,
let's make it a wider one, and your axe swings
again. This time you catch a singular rat, but
with the flat of the blade, and you send it flying
about ten feet, where it comes back unharmed and
joins the rest of its crew.
WIL: Just getting warmed up! And a one.
WILL: It can't be real! It can't be real.
LIAM: That is CG. That is computer-generated.
MATT: This time, in an angry fury that you are
being stifled by what is essentially sewer rats,
you lift your axe up in the air as one rat has
climbed up your pants
bites you right in the crotch.
WIL: Don't touch it, don't do that. Okay. Yes, it
does.
MATT: In pain, you drop the axe behind you and
reach down and grab the rat and tear it in half
out of frustration and anger, and I will give you
a point of damage for that.
WIL: A point of damage? The rat bit through my
metal codpiece?
MATT: It snuck up past the small little gap there
and ate through your leather britches, and you are
in severe pain, nearing prone.
WIL: Well, I mean us dwarves are known for our
dicks that are sensitive to rat bites.
MATT: This is true. They didn't put that in the
Player's Handbook, but I think they're going to
amend it, too.
WIL: Oh, it's canon in my game.
MATT: And with that, Thorbir's turn is up.
WIL: Yeah, it sure is. Excuse me, I must inform
the internet of my majesty.
LIAM: You got your dick bit by a rat, son. You're
a man now.
WILL: (laughs) You're a man now.
MATT: Every dwarf, when they hit the tender age of
30, has to wander waist-deep into the rat pits.
All right. Kashaw, you're up.
WILL: First I would like to turn to Thorbir and
say, are you kidding me?! How many rats are left?
MATT: You have the group that is currently
swarming around Thorbir, one immediately to your
left that you're batting away with your shield,
and one group that is currently trying to get all
up in Tiberius's shit.
WILL: Can we tell who's in the most danger at this
point?
MATT: For the most part, everyone seems to be
doing okay. He's looking the roughest from a
situational--
MARISHA: That's just a bruised ego. That's
different.
WILL: Yeah. I think I would like to move to come
to Strongcastle's defense over here.
ORION: Stormwind.
WILL: Right.
MATT: All right, so. There we go. The rats do get
a swing at you. That is going to be-- that's not
going to hit. Once again, you hear the little
small tings against the back of your armor, but
it's not even a bother at this point. All right,
what are you doing? You move up to the rats.
WILL: Once again, because again, people, I need
some help. I'm a healer for god's sakes, so I'm
going to try Sacred Flame again.
MATT: All right, which I'm going to say you stayed
a step back on, because it's a ranged attack. So
you get real close, once again set your spear down
real fast, grab your holy symbol, and then release
that burst. Go ahead and roll for attack.
Actually, no, it's a saving throw again. That's my
end. The rats roll a one. Go ahead and roll
straight damage on that. It's 3d8.
WILL: Oh, the 3d8s. That's right. I'm sorry.
MATT: It's all good.
WILL: Here are the d8s, right?
WIL: You know, if you're me, you only have to roll
once.
WILL: That's not that great. Eight.
MATT: Eight points of damage. You release it and
you can see about 13, 14 rats get thrown and
scattered, their lifeless burnt corpses (pattering
sound) around, and the little hole that you left
in the middle of that pile closes up as the rats
form once again into a coalesced swarm. That
ends your turn, I believe. That'll bring us to
Tiberius.
MARISHA: Kill some rats.
ORION: What the hell are we in?
MATT: It's a giant cylindrical-- it looks like it
was once a cistern that has been turned into some
sort of a refuse--
ORION: Is there a roof?
MATT: From what you can see? Roll a perception
check.
ORION: What do I use?
MATT: Perception. It's a skill. You don't use it
very often.
ORION: 15. No, 14.
MATT: As far as you can see, it goes up maybe 30
or so feet beyond the radius of your Light spell
and fades into darkness. You have no idea if
there's a ceiling or end to it or how far it would
be if there was one.
ORION: Okay. Well, I've got one right next to me,
right?
MATT: You do.
ORION: I'm going to put out my hand and I'm going
to do a Firebolt right next to that one.
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and roll to attack with
disadvantage.
ORION: Why, are they on me?
MATT: Yeah, they're right up against you. Ranged
attacks, when you're in melee with the target,
it's at disadvantage.
ORION: Oh, right. Well, then I'm going to not do
that. I'm going to cast Obelisk of Stone and then
quicken spell and then I'm going to do a Firebolt.
That's what I'm going to do.
MATT: Okay.
ORION: Yeah.
WIL: Avenge me!
MATT: Obelisk of Stone puts you up on top there.
ORION: About ten feet. And then I'll do the 2d10
damage.
MATT: All righty.
ORION: d10s. Here's one.
WILL: All right, I think I have one.
MATT: Roll to hit first.
ORION: Is it a d10? Do what now? Roll to hit
first?
LIAM: You need d10s.
ORION: Yes, thank you. Is that a spell attack
roll? That's 31.
MATT: 31? Yeah, that hits. Swarm of rats: not too
hard to hit, really.
ORION: Cool, so that's 11, so that's 16.
MATT: 16? All right. You lift up onto your
ten-foot platform as this stone pushes up from
beneath all of the slime, and as it emerges, it
sends this spilling cluster of whatever was at the
bottom of this. You have to keep your footing as
you go up. In fact, because of this room, I'm
going to go ahead and have you roll a dexterity
saving throw.
ORION: What is that, 12?
MATT: 12. So you get the attack off, but you lose
your footing from the slick nature of the obelisk
you just created, and you will plummet off and
fall prone into the refuse to the side of the
obelisk, but you still get the damage off on the
spell. As you blast-- whoa-- and Tiberius, you
tumble off the side. It's a soft impact. You only
fall ten feet. It doesn't do any damage, but you
are currently prone on the ground next to your
obelisk.
LIAM: Refuse is code for shit.
MATT: I believe that ends your turn. You haven't
moved yet, so you could technically use your
movement to get up from prone if you wanted.
ORION: Oh, I'll do that.
MATT: Okay. Cool, that ends your turn. He's gone.
Vax, you're up.
LIAM: I'm staying safe up here. I'm going to throw
more daggers. There's a little pile under
Thorbir's hiney? And a little bit out by itself,
right?
MATT: Right here, yes.
LIAM: Are they spilling out from under the dwarf's
hiney? Or are they all hidden?
MATT: No, they're all around him. They're sharing
the same space.
LIAM: Okay. I'm going to throw daggers at the one
that's biting his ass, so it's a sneak attack.
That's not good. That's 13.
MATT: So a 13, that hits.
LIAM: Oh hey, rats.
MATT: Rats are easy to hit.
LIAM: Oh, right.
WIL: No, they're not.
(laughter)
WILL: Usually, they are.
LIAM: That's two plus seven is nine, plus 11, 12,
17, 18, 19, 21 is the first dagger, and I send the
next one down. If the last one hit, this one hits.
So that's 21 and the second dagger
is a ten, so 31.
MATT: 31 damage total? All right. You notice that
because of the nature of the swarm, what would
normally be a creature that you could do a
shit-ton of damage to, knowing its physicality, it
seems like a lot of the physical attacks aren't as
effective as you would like. However, this swarm
has already taken a few hits, and as you carve
through, dagger after dagger, eventually you pick
off the remainder of the rats and the swarm is
dissipated. The few ones that are stragglers,
realizing that safety in numbers is missing, begin
to curl their ways back underneath the piles they
clawed from originally.
WIL: I was doing fine.
MATT: That ends your turn? At the end of your
turn, the other two rat swarms, also realizing
the circumstance is bad, fight-or-flight kicks in and they
flee and crawl back underneath.
MARISHA: Smart rats.
LIAM: Cheese!
WILL: (Mickey Mouse voice) Haha! I think I'm going
to flee. Let's all swarm, come on, we can do it.
MATT: So you all take a moment, take your breath.
You get back up.
LIAM: I'm going to hop down in the shit and loop
an arm under Thorbir's arm. Come on, old man.
WILL: How's your dick?
WIL: I don't want to talk about it.
ORION: I Prestidigitate all the crap off.
MATT: Okay.
WILL: Is she still on the ground, or has she
gotten up?
MATT: You've gotten back up. She's still
spattered--
WILL: You ruined your new dress.
MARISHA: I know. I got scorched by Tiberius's
fireball.
WILL: You fought well, though.
WIL: I'm looking for the way out of here. I'm
looking to see where the rakshasa went.
MATT: Looking on the far side, it's partially
buried in the ground from the collection here, but
you can see there is a bit of a push, like the
door had been opened briefly and pushed things
away, then slammed shut, and it's slowly starting
to coalesce back towards it.
LIAM: All right. Hold on, everybody. I walk right
toward it, perception checking the area around it
and the door itself. That's 24.
MATT: 24? The door appears to be a normal door.
Nothing strange about its presentation. However,
upon checking the handle on the edge of it, it
does appear to be locked.
LIAM: Locked. All right, well, I pull out my
little sack and I pull out one of these (twing)
and go to work on it. That is a 28.
MATT: 28. In a matter of seconds-- this is an
old-school lock, and one that is generally used
for not very security-required rooms. Flick of the
wrist, (click, creak) the door pushes inward a
little bit and you have to get your strength in to
push back the cluster of dried and liquid plant
matter that is rotting against it, with just
enough of a gap to push through into a dark room
beyond, it looks like.
LIAM: I Fonzie'd it.
MATT: You did, kind of.
LIAM and MARISHA: (Fonzie impressions) Hey.
LIAM: Okay, Tiberius, are you still lighting up
this room?
MATT: He is currently the only light source, yes.
LIAM: Okay, so there's probably a little bit of
light going in there, so I'm trying to look in to
see what I can see from his spill-in there.
MATT: Okay. Glancing into the next room, you can
see there's a little bit of a trickle of liquid
that has spilled from underneath the doorway from
this room. And you get the feeling this door isn't
open very often, if at all, and the little bit of
slime that has coasted through only goes about
five, ten feet into a long stone hallway that
disappears in the darkness no more than maybe 20
feet from you. Even with the low light, you can
see pretty far. To the right and left of you,
though: sets of iron bars.
LIAM: Okay. Tibs. Follow that. Try and keep behind
me. And I throw up the hood and go as low to the
ground as I can, and I start to Gollum along the
floor, looking at the ground in front of me in the
dim light, trying to see if I can see any traps
ahead of me.
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make a perception check.
LIAM: 25.
MATT: 25. As you begin walking into the hallway,
you go past, and you start to notice from the
visual around you, there's smooth stone floor. The
iron bars are all the way across with some
partitions between. This is in particular a
subterranean holding facility, some sort of an
underground prison, and it's very quiet and there
is no light in here. There are sconces set up, but
it looks like there have been no recent torches
set.
LIAM: Hear anything?
MATT: Hearing? You hear nothing. It is absolutely
still and quiet.
LIAM: I grab my earring. Let's do it. And I start
moving forward.
MARISHA: I follow him.
MATT: The rest of you guys continue with him?
WIL: I come up to the door and see what I can see
with my darkvision.
MATT: Okay. Glancing inside as well, you can see
the prison goes on for as far as your visual range
is, about 60 feet. There are four sets of prison
cells on each side, so there are eight cells total,
and the hallway continues past that. But you can't
quite see beyond those initial four on each side.
You can glance on the inside. You can see what
looks like dried and brittle thatch that was once
used to cover the floor has slowly molded over
time. To your left, you see what looks to
be elements of a skeletal corpse that was left for
a very long period of time in the cell immediately
to your left as you look through the doorway.
WIL: I'll continue on.
MATT: Okay. As you enter this area and start
stepping in, the air itself has a very chemical
smell to it. It's hard to describe. There's
something musty and untouched to the air, but
there's also some sort of gentle hint of an acrid
scent. Do you guys continue forward through this
prison area?
LIAM: I'm looking at the floor and everything as
far out as I can see ahead of me.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: What's above us?
MATT: Looking up, it's about 15 feet up, and it is
another smooth stone ceiling. The construction
here looks old. You, specifically, go ahead and
make a perception check. With advantage, because
you are a dwarf.
WIL: 12 plus whatever. Do I roll again?
MATT: Yeah, roll again. As you're a dwarf, and
this is an underground stone structure.
WIL: Oh, nine. So 15.
MATT: Okay, that's not bad. Looking at the
stonework here, it's definitely created for
function more than any sort of presentory
functionality. You gather from looking at the
nearby pieces of the stone wall that connects with
the first set of metal bars that this was probably
carved a few hundred years ago, and the metal bars
as you move past-- you guys see this too-- the
doorways that lead into these, some appear to be
locked and some are completely open, easy to
swing, and as you pull it open, (creak) very heavy
rust against those iron doors, probably affected
largely by the nearby moisture emanating from the
room and whatever chemical's hanging in the air.
WILL: Are we still lit?
MATT: You're still lit by his Light spell, yes.
MARISHA: And there's nothing really in the prison
cells, with the exception of one skeleton?
MATT: Well, that was in one room. If you want to
go ahead and check around, go ahead and make an
investigation check.
LIAM: I thought we would have seen it here.
MARISHA: Yeah, I'll look around in the cells.
Natural 20!
MATT: There is balance to the universe. As you're
walking past, Keyleth, looking over on one side,
you see further up, with a bunch of the thatch
pushed around it, there appears to be a corpse
that doesn't have the layer of dust that a number
of the other skeletal piles in some of the other
cells seem to have. The door to get into the cell,
though, does appear to be locked.
MARISHA: Vax. Need your help; this is locked.
LIAM: What's in there?
MARISHA: Looks like a fresh dead guy?
LIAM: Okay. Out comes the pick. I'm going to
perception check that corpse through the cell.
That's a 12.
MATT: It's hard to tell. It's mostly covered with
a lot of this thatch. It doesn't look like it was
intentionally covered, but some sort of a struggle
took place in this room.
LIAM: Now for the door. Natural 20.
WIL: You're welcome.
(laughter)
WIL: I work in mysterious ways.
MATT: The lock on this, it's not an intricate
lock, but it is very heavily rusted, and as soon
as you start moving in there, you realize that
there is actually something metal that has been
broken off inside, whether by a previous key, just
through accident, or intent, it was broken off
inside. You manage to find a way to remove it,
pull the piece out, and still get the lock open.
The gate swings open, and you guys enter to
inspect this corpse. Looking at it, you notice
that the body has been probably dead for a couple
months. It is in prolonged state of decomposition,
but there is still some semblance of flesh
sloughing off the remnants of the bone. You can
see from the wounds that it has received that a
large portion of it has been torn open very
violently and elements of it have been removed.
The softer organs.
WIL: Is it wearing any clothing?
MATT: As you inspect it, you look and see that
while smashed with blood and dirt and dust, the
outfit does appear to be that of a Duskmeadow
Bastion.
LIAM: I feel really terrible, but I'm going to
give him the old half-elven pat-down and see if I
can find anything on his personage.
MATT: Looking about his entire body, anything of
value has been taken.
WILL: Can I speak with him?
MATT: Can you what?
WILL: I'd like to cast Speak With Dead.
MATT: You can.
WILL: Let's find out what killed him.
LIAM: You can do that?
WILL: Yes, I can do many things.
LIAM: That's badass!
MARISHA: And he's a dusk-what Bastion?
MATT: Duskmeadow, which is the section of
Vasselheim that worships the Raven Queen. The guys
that you encountered earlier in the road? The
dark, studded leather armor with the cloak swept
over one arm.
LIAM: You know he's dead, right?
WIL: I cast Annoyed Dwarf to know that he was
likely killed by the rakshasa. Why are we standing
in this room?
WILL: I want to know when he was killed.
WIL: I'm not stopping you.
MATT: Okay, so as you sit down and you begin
preparing your ritual, you once again mutter under
your breath and begrudgingly pull out your symbol.
As you continue casting the spell, there's a
slight shimmer of greenish-blue light that slowly
pours over the corpse, seeps into the bones, and
for a moment you see Kashaw go into this
trance-like state. Kashaw, you see from within the
corpse, the face sits up with this horrible
cracking bone-like sound. The skeletal element
with this partially mummified and mostly rotten
face steps forward, and the vacuous sockets that
once held its eyes turn towards you, and you could
swear you see the bone of its grimace grin as it
airily whispers towards you, "Why do you bother
me?"
WILL: Because I have questions.
MATT: "What questions do you have?"
WILL: What killed you?
MATT: "Something that was not supposed to be here.
Something vicious, something untrue. It wasn't
"what it seemed. This woman was asking for help,
and no one's supposed to be down here if it's not
"their route. Occasionally, we come and check on
these abandoned parts of the prison. A woman was
"here. A woman should not be down here. I went to
ask what was wrong, and she took this from me."
And the bony hand reaches up and gestures to the
throat, and you can see there's giant claw marks
across the front of its spinal cord where its neck
is that give the sensation that something tore its
throat out.
WILL: A woman did this to you?
MATT: "Aye."
MARISHA: Shapeshifter.
WILL: Or there's more than one. When? When were
you killed?
MATT: "14 weeks have passed. I was resting."
WILL: Anybody have questions? He's not going to be
here long, I can tell you that. Not at 14 weeks.
MARISHA: Ask him if he knows which direction he
went, and if he has a hideout.
WILL: Which direction she went, you mean.
MARISHA: Well, he or she or whatever it was.
WILL: Did you see which direction she went after
she killed you?
MATT: "She walked away, laughing and eating parts
of me. I have not seen her since, but others walk
"these halls. I've seen a dwarf pass through two or
three times, and as it did and passed my cell, it
"laughed. Sometimes guards come to inspect, but
none have found me. None have found me yet."
WILL: Are all the guards that come Bastions of the
Raven Queen?
MATT: "We are the ones to protect the Amaranthine
Oubliette. That is our job here. You sit in the
"lower forgotten halls of the Oubliette. My final
resting place."
WILL: Stormcloud? Any questions?
ORION: I think we've learned all we can from this
one.
MARISHA: Which direction was the dwarf walking?
WILL: You can answer her. What direction was the
dwarf going?
MATT: The other hand creeps up from underneath the
thatch. As you guys are watching this, the corpse
is doing nothing, it's just lying there, he is
talking to an unmoving corpse. For your vision,
the hand reaches over and points in the direction
you guys came from.
WILL: So it went the way we came.
MATT: "That was two weeks ago."
MARISHA: But he said he's been coming and going,
so maybe he was just leaving?
WILL: Coming the same direction we came from,
though. That seems odd. And a man,
a dwarf, and a woman.
LIAM: Weeks ago. Not five minutes ago.
MATT: The spell fades, and the corpse falls back
to its original pose, jaw left open, aghast in its
final moments.
LIAM: Thorbir's right. We're burning time. We need
to go in.
WILL: Go in where? Do we go back the direction the
dwarf came?
ORION: I rolled a 23 arcana check on Thorbir's
jeweled knife that he gave me.
MATT: Just so you guys are aware, you are
essentially in this vicinity of the prison. This
was the room where you found the corpse, here. And
you've seen just enough light begin to reveal
there is a secondary prison room up here.
WILL: I'm sorry, but we came from that direction?
MATT: From this door, yes. This would've connected
right there.
WILL: Okay.
WIL: Every second we're here, it's getting away.
ORION: I agree.
LIAM: You're absolutely right. We're going in.
When we're in there, you keep it busy, and I will
carve it up.
WIL: I will keep it busy.
WILL: Try not to get your dick bit by a rat.
LIAM: I slide past Tiberius, crouch down to the
ground again, and start scuttling along the
ground. Looking, listening.
ORION: What was the ruling on the arcana check?
MATT: For?
ORION: The jeweled knife that Thorbir gave me.
MATT: The knife does not appear to have any sort
of magical aura about it. It's just a very
well-crafted and probably relatively expensive
piece of functionality or ornamental use. It's a
very fine blade, though. It would be a fine thing
to enchant, if you were inclined to.
ORION: Kashaw. How close are you to your god?
WILL: At one time, very close. Now? I don't think
you'd want to be anywhere near her.
MARISHA: And which god is that?
WILL: My god is called Vesh, and I am the only one
on the planet who has ever heard of her. Yeah, she
killed everybody else. Want to talk to her?
ORION: I don't.
WILL: No. Neither do I.
MARISHA: Why did she spare you?
WILL: Because I'm her husband.
ORION: Oh. How is that, being married to a god?
That's rather inconvenient.
MARISHA: And how does that happen in the first
place?
WIL: Thorbir sighs heavily and steps into the
room, and follows Vax.
MARISHA: We can walk and talk. You guys go.
MATT: So you're walking forward.
WILL: She married me at birth. My mother was told
that I was a special child, which is why I had the
yellow eyes. I had two when I was born. We were
married at birth. She killed everyone in the
village. On my 15th naming-day she came to
consummate the marriage. I made the first 50
slashes on my right arm. She made the next 50 for
a ritual called the Sting of the Hundred, and when
my blood mixed with her sweat, I gained all her
memories. That's when I found out she was
essentially the devil. I was raised as a healer
because I wasn't just supposed to be her husband,
but also her balance, because the
universe wouldn't accept somebody as black as her
in it. Tried to kill her at 15. Haven't seen her
since.
ORION: Ooh. So it's not like you can ask for a
favor, I suppose.
WILL: I suppose I could, but there's a good chance
she'll kill you, me, and everyone around at the
same time.
MATT: At this point in time, as you guys are
having this conversation, you moved up and looked
and you can see there are two humanoids walking
from this direction further down this hallway,
which you can see leads this direction.
LIAM: I'd like to imagine that Thorbir and Vax
left that conversation behind a little.
MATT: As you see them approaching here, stepping
in your direction, they are both dressed in full
Duskmeadow Bastion armor. The one on the far end
appears to be older, balding with thinning gray
hair. The one who's further up is in his forties.
Big thick brown beard, hair pulled back into a
ponytail, and they're both lightly conversing to
each other. Not paying much attention, like
they're running through a routine.
LIAM: I start pushing back on Thorbir, backing
everybody up, silently pushing backward and trying
to steer everyone in a heap backwards and to the
side of the cell we just came from.
Just trust me.
MATT: Make a stealth check.
LIAM: 19.
MATT: 19? Okay. As you're pushing everyone back,
(shushing) whispering all this, you hear a voice
say, "Hello? Hold on. Hello?" The one with the
beard approaches with his hand on his weapon, the
other one moving along the back.
LIAM: Did I get them into the cell?
MATT: You pushed them far back and into the cell?
LIAM: Yeah, that was what I wanted to do, just
backwards to everybody.
ORION: Yeah, and as this is going on, I dissipate
the Light spell.
MATT: Okay. Light spell vanishes. He walks up and
turns the corner.
LIAM: I give everybody a group hug with my Cloak
of Elvenkind and try to make a big rag pile out of
this corner. I'm very uncomfortably pressed
against Thorbir's backside.
MATT: Okay. The cloak can only really cover you
and partially another person. The rest of you all
make a stealth check.
MARISHA: So who's it partially covering?
LIAM: (laughs) Thorbir.
MARISHA: Thorbir.
MATT: No, it's not enough to really effectively do
it to another person. It's just more for flavor.
LIAM: It's the thought that counts.
MARISHA: 15.
WILL: Five.
ORION: 20.
WIL: A viewer whose chat name begins with a U-- I
won't identify the viewer in case this goes
badly-- sent me these dice and said, may they roll
well. I would like to apologize in advance for
what is about to happen to this person's beloved
dice. It's a 15. Oh, look at that! It turns out
that there are two-digit numbers on these dice.
(laughter)
WIL: And my stealth is two, so that's 17.
MATT: 17, all right. So the guy walks into the
room, looks back and forth. The one behind him
steps forward into the room a bit. The other one
steps behind him. Looks about. Looks from one side
of the room, looks over to your room. There's
almost a glimmer of recognition in his eye, and
continues walking past. They just start walking
back the direction you guys came from.
MARISHA: Uh.
MATT: The other one--
MARISHA: I throw up a Wall of Stone.
MATT: Where?
MARISHA: Right there.
MATT: Right there?
MARISHA: To lock them in.
WILL: That wasn't quiet.
MATT: Wall of Stone goes up.
LIAM: (muffled) What the fuck?
WIL: How long does that last?
MARISHA: It's permanent!
WIL: Let's go.
WILL: It's time to move.
LIAM: All right, back around the corner, following
around, looking, listening. Everybody the same.
MATT: That chemical smell is getting stronger and
stronger. It's burning your nose a little bit.
MARISHA: So Kashaw. If you're the only one who
knows about this goddess, that means she also
killed your parents?
WILL: Yes. Thank you for bringing that up.
LIAM: Perception? I got you, baby. Well, that was
perception.
WIL: So I'm attempting to make a perception roll
to see if I can pull anything out of these smells,
maybe based on my experience with smithing and the
chemicals that are associated with all that sort
of thing, but I did roll a three. So I guess I
would add a three. The best I can get out of that
is a nine.
MATT: Okay. You (sniffs) and it clears your
sinuses up pretty well. Much like a fresh dab of
wasabi, your nostrils are a little more open.
Because it's not sulfurous, it doesn't have
something similar to what you'd find in smithing
in your experience, at the very least. It's hard
to really place where it comes from. You said
you're going which way?
LIAM: Towards that other door that they did not
come out of.
MATT: This here? All right.
LIAM: 23 I rolled, perception.
MATT: 23. You approach the door. This door is
locked. It does not appear to be trapped.
LIAM: Okay. Let's unlock it.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: That is a 21.
MATT: Okay. As you reach down to the lock and you
place the picks inside, start fiddling, you look
at the iron around it, and the actual metal seems
to be frosting over. You pull back your head, and
as you exhale, your breath becomes visible and the
temperature seems to drop significantly, and as
soon as you look up at the wood, something
shimmers in the wood, and it's a humanoid face
that just pushes out of the wood.
LIAM: Can I use Uncanny Dodge to roll backward
right now?
MATT: Right now?
MARISHA: Oh my god.
WIL: Do we see this happening?
MATT: You guys are hearing his reaction to this
just happen in the front, there. I'm going to go
ahead and say sure.
ORION: Are there torches down this hallway?
MATT: So one of the hands comes through, reaching
out for you, this ghostly arm
just swings towards you.
LIAM: And I say, nope!
MATT: I'd like to have everybody roll initiative.
MARISHA: Oh, again? Man, we're going to run into
everything.
ORION: Are there torches in this hallway?
MATT: No.
WILL: Lighting, open flame of any kind?
MATT: Currently, no.
WILL: Ten.
WIL: 11.
MATT: All right. So we have 20 or higher? Anyone?
ORION: Yes. 21.
MATT: All right. 20 to 15? 15 to ten?
WIL: 11.
WILL: I had ten, yeah.
MATT: There we go. All right, nine to five?
MARISHA: Nine.
MATT: All right, and then?
LIAM: 11, as well. I roll back, going (squeals).
MATT: All right. Tiberius, you're up first. As you
see these two drifting humanoid translucent
ghostly entities drift out the door that Vax was
at as he leaps backward, a second one drifts out
of the stone down the hallway and turns towards
the group, both of them giving these horrible low
moaning sounds. (moans) Their feet are dragging
about a foot off the ground.
ORION: I'll point to the one coming from opposite
of Vax.
MATT: There?
ORION: That guy.
MATT: That guy, all right.
ORION: And then I'm going to do True Strike on
him. And I'll back away!
MATT: Back away.
ORION: That's good. That's my turn.
MATT: Cool. All right. They go next. This one is
going to drift forward. Now, the one that swiped
at you, as you dodge backward, it drifts forward
and its arms reach out for you and attempt to
pierce the front of your chest. Go ahead and make
a charisma saving throw.
LIAM: Okay. I will do that.
MATT: Keyleth, you do the same as the spirit
suddenly--
MARISHA: A charisma saving throw?
MATT: Yes. Flickers and appears right before you.
LIAM: 11.
MATT: 11.
MARISHA: Okay. 11.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM, MARISHA, and WILL: (cartoonish ghost 
noises)
MATT: You guys watch as both of these ghostly
entities (whoosh) completely slip into the
physical form of Vax and Keyleth, who each shudder
for a second as their eyes glaze over. Both the
entities are no longer visible. However, you feel
the presence of a cold, invading mind full of
anger and distant loss and rage fill your brain,
and your body is not your own.
MARISHA: Sorry, guys.
LIAM: This is going to be fun.
MATT: Suddenly you see Vax pull his daggers out and
turn around and look at the rest of the group.
Keyleth turns around and snarls at the rest of the
group, this twisted grin.
LIAM: (whispering) They call me Count Chocula.
(laughter)
MATT: Thorbir, you're up.
WIL: I am going to make a goading attack to try
and draw whoever's closer.
MATT: Closest to you would be Keyleth. Keyleth is
right next to you.
MARISHA: I don't even know what to do.
WIL: Yeah, so I'm just going to make a goading
attack, and if I hit, then they come after me. Or
she comes after me. I'm pretty sure I don't hit. I
don't know why I'm rolling. Sorry, that's a four
on my first roll.
LIAM: Use this one; it's quicker.
WIL: (laughs) Oh, 14. I'm sorry. I can't remember.
Oh, plus ten. 24.
MATT: 24 versus Keyleth? What's your armor class?
MARISHA: 17.
MATT: 17. That hits Keyleth.
WIL: Sorry about this.
MARISHA: It's okay. Just keep me alive, Cashew.
WIL: Can I pull the attack to not do as much
damage? I mean, other than the way I usually roll
dice. Can I hit her with like the blunt side of
the axe--
MATT: You can say subdual damage. It'll still
damage her.
WIL: Okay. Should I roll my regular attack dice?
MATT: Yeah, your regular attack dice.
WIL: 15 points of damage.
MATT: 15 points of damage to you, Keyleth, as you
get smacked broadside with the blunt edge of
Thorbir's axe. You see this happening, and in your
head you're screaming, trying to push this out,
but no matter how hard your will imposes itself,
your body is not your own. You feel like you're
restrained in a dark closet, watching from a
distant hallway as
somebody else controls your body.
WIL: So I have to expend a superiority die, and I
add this-- yeah. Oh, fuck you! Now you're going to
work? So that's nine more points. Sorry.
MATT: Nine more points of damage on top of that.
WIL: And then the target needs to make a wisdom
saving throw.
MATT: All right. I will make that the ghost
creature. That is a 16.
WIL: Yeah.
MATT: What's the DC on it?
WIL: I don't know. It doesn't say.
MATT: Is this for your battlemaster, for goading
attack?
WIL: Yeah.
MATT: Goading attack with battlemaster.
WIL: Sorry, nerds. I don't play this version.
LIAM: Would it be his wisdom?
WIL: My wisdom saving throw is two. My wisdom is
plus two.
MATT: Okay. Oh, the DC is eight plus your
proficiency bonus, which would be 12, plus your--
what's your strength modifier?
WIL: Four.
MATT: Four, so that'd be 16. 16. So yeah, it just
makes the saving throw.
WIL: Oh. Well. Glad I wounded my friend for no
good reason. Okay.
MARISHA: It makes its saving throw?
WIL: So it makes its saving throw, so nothing
happens.
MATT: Right, so that was your first two strikes.
MARISHA: So he just punched me for no reason?
WIL: Yeah, I'm not going to make my third attack.
I don't want to hurt anybody.
MATT: Vax, you don't get a turn. You are unable to
control your body, and you also do not get a
saving throw. You are considered possessed. Kash,
you're up.
WILL: I don't know if this is possible. Can I use
Banishment and target one of the ghosts that's
actually possessing them?
MATT: You have no way of knowing how to target the
creature. There is no visual or physical form. You
just see your friend with a glazed-over look in
the eyes, and that cold sensation around them. You
have some experience with undead, and you know you
have some tools against them, but Banishment is
something that you have no way of targeting the
spirit within them. You would have to target them
physically.
WILL: I think what you said was right; we might
have to knock them out. So maybe we target one at
a time? I hold Vax, and you come in.
MARISHA: I have 13 hit points.
ORION: Yeah, you should definitely--
WILL: Should do that. Okay. Yeah, I'm going to cast
Hold Person, and I'm going to hold Vax as tight as
I can.
MATT: All right. What's the spell DC for you?
WILL: It is 16.
MATT: And is that wisdom saving throw on that?
WILL: Is that right?
MATT: Let's see, Hold Person. Wisdom, all right.
Go ahead and make a will saving throw, Vax. Or
wisdom saving throw.
MARISHA: Fail it. Something I'll never say to
you.
LIAM: 17.
MATT: 17.
MARISHA: What's his DC? What's your DC? Or is it
versus his wisdom?
WILL: 16.
MATT: 16. Defeats it. The spell effect shimmers
off.
LIAM: Right now, me and ghost in my mind are doing
that scene from Ghost with the pottery.
WILL: And my spell just can't get to you. Damn
it.
MATT: All right, so that finishes your turn. Do
you want to move anywhere, or are you going to
stay where you are?
WILL: Yeah, I think I'm going to have to tuck tail
and run. Let's try to split them up, at least, if
we can.
MATT: Okay. Which way do you want to go?
WILL: Really? You want to get them together? Then
let's do that. All right, fair enough. Let's get
them together.
ORION: Over here, Kashaw!
WILL: Yeah. Let's move. I want to go with
Stormdragon.
MATT: As you move back, Keyleth, you get an attack
of opportunity on him. Go ahead and roll an attack
with your staff.
MARISHA: Sorry, Cashew. Ooh, critical fail. I
don't want to!
WILL: I think she might like me!
MATT: As there is the mental struggle going on in
Keyleth's mind, this swing has extreme intensity
and then halfway through, just streaks off and slams
into the stone wall. Part of the staff splinters
and breaks at the edge. It's still functional, but
definitely took a hit from the wall.
MARISHA: My favorite staff!
MATT: All right. That ends your turn. Keyleth, you
lose your turn. Up at the top of the round,
Tiberius.
MARISHA: Can we not try and save from it? We can't
do shit? We're just on auto-pilot, at this point?
MATT: Does anyone here at the top of this round
want to make a religion check? Does anyone here
want to make a religion check?
WILL: Might as well, right?
MATT: Yeah, you've had some experience with death
and undeath in your history.
ORION: 20?
MATT: 20. Not you.
WILL: So plus seven. It's a six. No, it was nine.
16.
MATT: 16. Okay. You've heard of certain creatures,
ghosts, that can possess certain entities. When a
creature is possessed, you know from your
experience that it is very difficult to remove the
possession unless it's through some sort of a
ritual that forces undead away, or if the actual
person is brought to unconsciousness and near
death themself. Tiberius, you have the same visual
on this, though a little part of your brain says,
wait. You've seen Pike do something that scared
undead before. Top of the round, brings us to
Tiberius.
ORION: I take no pleasure in this. I cast Obelisk
of Stone and crush them.
MARISHA: Crush who?
ORION: Both of them.
MATT: You don't have visual on Vax, currently.
There's a wall.
ORION: I'll move forward and then do it.
MATT: Okay. You move up to there and do it?
ORION: Or as close as I can, as far away as I can
see Vax.
MATT: Cool. So currently, these two stone pillars
slam and crush both of you towards the ceiling.
LIAM: No, Tiberius-- !
MATT: Well, it's a dexterity saving throw, right?
So both of you make a dexterity saving throw.
LIAM: I rolled 22.
MARISHA: It's not going to be good. Yeah, I rolled
an 18.
MATT: So take half damage.
ORION: No, they take the damage. They're not
pinned. They just take the damage.
MATT: So they both take the damage.
MARISHA: Probably unconscious.
ORION: 31 points of damage.
MARISHA: I'm unconscious.
MATT: Keyleth, you fall unconscious on the ground,
forcing the spiritual entity out of your body.
ORION: I'm going to spend two sorcery points to
quicken a spell and then cast Scorching Ray right
at it. (fire blasts)
MATT: Okay. Go for it. So go ahead and roll for
the attack on each of them. Since it was forced
out, it is not in melee with you because it is far
enough away, so you straight roll for these.
ORION: What is that? Oh, plus my spell attack.
Okay, so 16 was one, 19, and 19.
MATT: All hit. Go ahead and roll damage for each.
Just give me a total damage.
ORION: Two, four, six.
LIAM: Rock that math, come on.
ORION: Okay, that's ten and 15, and then 18, 23.
MATT: 23? Okay. You release all three Scorching
Rays blasting into the ghost. It's impacting, but
the bursts seem to detonate through it. You can
see it's taking the hits, but it seems almost like
because of its ethereal form, it's not feeling the
full brunt of the attacks. It's affected by it,
and you can see its form being shuddered around by
it, but it's not as effective as you're used to
them being. That ends your turn, Tiberius. This
creature here. Okay, it does not regain its
possession ability. It is going to use Horrifying
Visage. All of a sudden, the ghost (roars)
Ghostbusters style. It grows and it's just a
horrible screaming entity. I need all of you
except for Vax to go ahead and make a wisdom
saving throw.
ORION: That's negative. That's 16.
MATT: 16?
WIL: 13.
WILL: 12.
MATT: 12. All of you guys manage to shrug off the
effect. You, however. There's something about the
way it screamed that for a moment, you swear it
had a face similar to Vesh from your wedding
night. It clutches your heart, and you are
considered frightened for the next minute. That
means you cannot move closer to it, and your
attacks against it are at a disadvantage until you
shrug it off. All right, then the possessed Vax is
going to, as his bonus action, attempt to make a
stealth check and back out of the way. Goes
against the wall. If I could have Thorbir and
Tiberius make perception checks.
LIAM: Don't I make a stealth check?
MATT: I'm making it for you.
WIL: Oh, look at that!
LIAM: He got 19!
MARISHA: Oh my god!
WIL: All right. 24.
MATT: 24. Nice.
ORION: I failed.
MATT: You failed? Okay. You see, out of the corner
of your eye, a couple of footsteps as Vax comes
rushing up. You do not see it, though, and as Vax
turns the corner right here, brings out the
daggers and goes towards Tiberius, out of the
corner of your eye, you see a flash of light.
Actually, no. You make the attack roll on this.
Attack roll against Tiberius.
LIAM: Oh, yeah.
MATT: Okay.
ORION: Wait, he has to roll at disadvantage.
Cloak.
MATT: Right, but he has advantage on you because
you didn't see him, so it cancels it out.
LIAM: That's true, yeah. My cloak gives you
disadvantage.
MATT: All right, so go ahead and roll with sneak
attack damage against Tiberius.
LIAM: Okay. That is a nine plus five, ten, 22, 24.
That's 33.
MATT: 33 points of piercing damage against you.
ORION: What's half of that?
MATT: No Stoneskin. You've already cast a
concentration spell. Right, but when you cast one,
the other one lasts for two more rounds, and you
started with True Strike.
MARISHA: It's also been way over a minute.
ORION: It's an hour-long spell. I can still hold
another one and do a different one, and hold the
other spell.
MATT: How it works is whenever you cast a new
concentration spell, the other one lasts for two
rounds, and then vanishes. I think this should be
the last round that you have it, because it's been
two rounds since you moved back. So this would be
the last round that you have it. So you still have
it, but it fades after this round. So halve that.
ORION: That's 16? 17 points?
MATT: Actually, and Stoneskin only works against
non-magical. So no, you take full damage because
his daggers are magic.
ORION: Both daggers are magical?
MATT: All of his daggers are magical.
MARISHA: Yeah, we're only rolling with magical
weapons at this point, yo.
MATT: So you take full damage.
ORION: Okay, cool. That's actually great to know.
I'm actually happy about that.
MATT: And you do not have your bonus action
because you used that to hide. So that's the one
attack you got. That round's over.
LIAM: There's no save or anything?
MATT: Not for this. Not until someone somehow
forces the undead entity out of your body or drops
you to zero hit points.
LIAM: Let's go to the bar.
MATT: All right. That brings us to Thorbir.
WIL: (sighs) If I see this correctly, there's this
spectral creature in front of me and my possessed
friend to my left. Is that right?
MATT: Correct. Actually, Keyleth, make a saving
throw.
MARISHA: I'm unconscious. Oh, right. Because I'm
unconscious. Seven.
MATT: Mark off a death saving throw. Thorbir?
WIL: Okay. Thorbir is going to-- I'm sorry. 16.
MATT: Total of 16?
WIL: Yeah, total of 16.
LIAM: 17.
MATT: 17. Whiffs. He's too fast. He ducks
underneath the depth of the axe swing.
WIL: Okay. Second attack. 18?
MATT: 18 will hit. Go ahead and roll damage on
that.
WIL: And I want to do that same thing.
MATT: Goading attack? Okay.
WIL: Sorry, no. Those are 20-siders. I'm like, how
did I roll a 19 on a d12? 15 plus six. 21.
MATT: Are you rolling 2d12 for damage on that?
WIL: Yeah. My damage is 2d12 plus six slashing
damage.
MATT: For a great axe, I think it should be 1d12.
I'm pretty sure.
WIL: I'm happy to make it 1d12.
MATT: (laughs) Just as a note, yeah. The great axe
is 1d12 damage.
WIL: Oh. Well, I don't know why it says 2d12,
then.
MATT: That's okay.
WIL: All right, so that's ten.
MATT: So ten damage to you. Goading attack, it
failed its saving throw. It rolled an 11.
It failed its saving throw. As you slam, you
can see the spiritual anger in the eyes (growls)
turn towards you, and it's focused on you at the
moment.
WIL: And I'm going to make my third attack. So
everyone knows that things have gotten back to
normal.
WILL: The world is right again!
WIL: Everything's fine.
MATT: The third strike, you swing and you swear
it's going right for the torso of Vax, and for a
second you almost want to restrain because you're
afraid of what it's going to do, before all of a
sudden both daggers catch the axe in midair and scissor-hold it
before it shoves off the blade. However, it does
appear to be focused on you. Does that end your
turn?
WIL: Oh, I'm sorry. I'm supposed to expend another
superiority die. I'm sorry, this is a whole new
mechanic.
MATT: That's okay. It's a new mechanic for me, too.
WIL: Okay, so I add one more to my damage roll,
and that was it. That was the only attack that
landed.
MATT: All right, that brings us to Brother Kash.
WILL: Who still can't move, correct?
MATT: You can't move closer.
WILL: Well, what I'd like to do is, if I know I'm
going to be rolling everything essentially at a
disadvantage, I'd like to at least help the people
that are still standing as much as I can, so I'd
like to Bless Stormwind and Thorbir. And can I do
myself, as well? It's up to three creatures.
MATT: Then yes, you can.
WILL: And myself, as well.
MATT: Okay, so you are all currently affected by a
Bless spell. What a Bless spell does-- if you want
to read it real fast.
WILL: Bless up to three creatures of your choice
within range. Whenever a target makes an attack
roll or a saving throw before the spell ends, the
target can roll a d4 and add the number rolled to
the attack roll or saving throw.
LIAM: It's hard to accept love from others when
you hate yourself.
WIL: No one hates themselves as much as I do.
MATT: All right, so do you want to move?
WILL: I can only move back and forth, right? Then
let me stay there so I can concentrate as much as
I can on holding the blessing.
MARISHA: An attack roll or saving throw?
MATT: Yes.
MARISHA: Can he target me? And would it work for
my saving throws?
MATT: I think you have to be a conscious creature
for the Bless spell to affect you. You do,
however, get your saving throw at the end of your
turn to try to shrug off the fright, so roll that.
And you can add a d4 to it.
WILL: So it's a d20 plus a four.
MATT: Yeah, with your wisdom, and then add a d4 to
it.
WILL: 19. Was that right? And wait, it's for
wisdom?
MATT: Yes.
WILL: So it's 19, then, plus-- where is wisdom?
Plus nine, so 28.
MATT: Okay, yeah.
WILL: Plus d4, right?
MATT: Plus d4 if you want to add it. Go for it.
WILL: One. 29.
MATT: You slam your foot into the ground for a
second and focus, and for a second the divine
energy pulses through your body, and you let a
little bit of Vesh's essence seep into you,
against your better judgment. It gives you that
sense of bravery to shrug off the fear you felt,
and for a second there, you're like, as a healing
cleric, undead should be afraid of you. And you
remember that there's an ability that you have
called Turn Undead that may come in handy, going
forward. That ends your turn. Keyleth, make
another saving throw.
MARISHA: (sighs) Let's use this one. This is a
big, shiny die. 17.
MATT: 17? Okay. So you're still unconscious.
MARISHA: I'm good!
MATT: Tiberius, you're up. (louder) Tiberius!
You're up.
ORION: Keyleth is right next to me, right?
MATT: She's currently on the ground. You can see a
little bit of blood trickling out the corner of
her mouth from the injury she sustained from the
crushing pillar. You can see a little of the light
fading from her eyes.
ORION: Vax is right next to me, also? Can I move,
probably take a hit from him,
and drag her with me?
MATT: You can do that, yeah. That will be your
whole turn, but yeah, you can do that.
ORION: That's what I choose to do.
MATT: Okay. So Tiberius, you reach down, you grab
Keyleth's body, and you pull her back through the
hallway. You can get her, probably about
half-speed, which is 30, so 15 feet. That far
back, out of the fray. Go ahead and make an attack
of opportunity against Tiberius as he moves away.
LIAM: Okay. That's shit. I rolled a 12.
MATT: Total of 12? Okay. As you swing back, you
dodge out of the way as you're pulling her along
the floor. That's your turn. This ghost entity
here does not get its possession back. It's going
to make a Withering Touch against you, Thorbir.
WIL: Damn it!
MATT: With a 13.
WIL: Against my--
MATT: Yeah.
WIL: No. 20.
MATT: As you reach out, you manage to pull back
with your axe and swing in its direction. It
dissipates its form for a second, and the attack
whiffs through the air. However, as you pull on
that side, Vax comes up from behind you. I want
you to go ahead and do two attacks against
Thorbir, with advantage.
LIAM: With advantage on both attacks or one?
MATT: You currently have him flanked.
LIAM: Because of my ghost friend.
MATT: Yes.
LIAM: So the first is high.
MATT: That hits.
LIAM: 28. Second is a one.
MATT: And another roll. They both have advantage
because you have him flanked.
LIAM: Come on, one. (mutters) 19.
MATT: Okay, so roll damage for both. First one
with sneak attack.
LIAM: Doesn't he have an armor class of 20?
Doesn't one of them miss? Wouldn't a 19 miss his
20 armor?
MATT: It was a total 19. I thought you rolled a
19.
LIAM: No, one was a total 19.
MATT: Oh, then the second one doesn't hit. Just
the first one does.
LIAM: So the first one does, and that is-- okay,
that's the lowest this could possibly be. Seven
plus nine, 12, 16, 17, 24.
WIL: Ouch. That's a lot of damage.
MATT: All right, that ends the ghosts' turn.
Thorbir, you're up. You've now got the attention
of both spiritual entities and your possessed
friend, and they're both swarming around you at
the moment.
WIL: Okay, great. I have this deal. (chuckles) I'm
sorry, I don't remember what it's called. I have a
maneuver where if I hit a thing, I can hit a
second thing. Let's just see if I hit. I'm going
to go ahead and try to hit Vax again.
MATT: Okay.
WIL: Two is probably not going to hit him.
Probably not going to happen. I'm thinking two's
probably not going to be-- it's a total of 12, but
I'm still pretty confident that 12 doesn't hit
him. Yeah. I'm pretty sure that misses. Okay,
let's try again. I get three attacks. That's
right. Let's see here. Oh, a four. Okay, so four.
Let's see, so that's 14. So I'm thinking the 14 is
probably not going to hit him. All right, let's
try one more time. Come on, right? And oh, that's
a seven. So that's a 17.
LIAM: Tag.
WIL: Oh!
MATT: You find purchase with your third strike
with your axe.
WIL: I just need time to warm up! I'm thinking
about my daughter. So I guess I hit you.
LIAM: I don't like this game. I don't really like
this episode.
WIL: I make a precision attack, so I can add one
more die to the roll.
LIAM: Come on, clock me, War and Peace. Let's do
this.
WIL: I'm working on it.
MARISHA: War and Peace?
WIL: Oh, good. So that's a one on the d12, plus
six, seven, plus nine is 16.
MATT: 16 points of slashing damage to you.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: Do you wish to move, or are you going to
stay where you are, Thorbir?
WIL: I would like to no longer be flanked by them,
if that's at all possible.
So I will move back. Sure.
MATT: I'll say you can move there pretty safely.
Move the other way. All right, that brings us to
Kashaw.
WILL: Okay. I'm going to Channel Divinity: Turn
Undead.
MATT: Turn Undead. Okay, what's the radius on
that?
WILL: 30 feet.
MATT: 30 feet. You're probably going to have to
move a little closer to get them both in there.
WILL: I want to get as close as I can, right on
the 30-foot radius.
MATT: All right. Not a problem. So you're going to
go ahead and Turn Undead. As you reach up and grab
your holy symbol, pulling it out from under your
armor once again, clutching it tightly, you can
feel the blood begin to pour from the inside of
your hand, you're holding it so hard. And with a
flash of extremely vibrant white light with this
strange halo of pitch black that surrounds it, a
force wave billows out from you throughout the
hallway. For a brief moment, you see Vax look
over, and his eyes widen for a second as the blast
wave hits him.
WILL: You're stronger than that.
LIAM: You have a fan.
WILL: I just think it would be funny. Hit pedals
like a guitar. You can just change your thing.
Fan. Rain.
MATT: Both fail. All right. So suddenly, as the
blast wave hits Vax, the spirit is forced out of
his body against the wall. It pushes it out, and
all of a sudden, you have control of your form
again. Blown against the wall, and they both
halfway slide into the wall. They both have a
severe look of fear on their face. That's going to
end your turn. Keyleth,
make another saving throw.
MARISHA: Eight.
MATT: So a second failed death saving throw.
MARISHA: Someone pump some life into me!
MATT: Tiberius.
ORION: Yeah, I'm going to pop one of my simple
potions.
MATT: Okay, just the level one?
ORION: Yeah.
MATT: All right, go ahead and roll. That is 2d4
plus two.
ORION: Okay. That's seven.
MATT: Seven? Okay, you heal seven hit points. You
come to consciousness.
MARISHA: (gasps)
MATT: You get rid of the saving throws. You look
around. Your eyes focus and you can see now,
there's these two glowing entities, the ghosts
that attacked. The one that was inside you is now
over against the wall and looks like it's
dissipating and is extremely frightened by
something.
ORION: Can I use the rest of my turn to help her
up?
MATT: Sure. You go ahead and prop her up to her
feet.
ORION: All right, and that's my turn.
MATT: Okay. For their turn, they both fade into
the wall and vanish from sight.
MARISHA: They were so cold.
MATT: So all of you take a moment of stillness, as
the spiritual entities seem to have vanished into
the wall.
MARISHA: Oh, they left?
MATT: They left after he blasted them with his
shockwave of positive energy. They just went into
the wall.
MARISHA: You scared them with positive energy?
WILL: Unfortunately, the only kind of energy I'm
allowed to use, most of the time.
LIAM: You told me, when I pick-pocketed that guy
topside, it was a healing potion. It was blue,
right? That's what you told me.
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM: I'm pulling that out of my pocket and
walking over to that door in a daze and I just
down it, push the door open with my foot.
MATT: Okay. That is a greater healing potion. 4d4
plus four.
ORION and MARISHA: Are you moving forward?
LIAM: No. Well, yeah. Sort of.
ORION: Vex, no! Stop! What are you doing?
LIAM: My name is Vax! And I keep going.
ORION: That's what I said.
MATT: Okay, you kick the door open. You have very
little light source in here, but with your vision,
you manage to look in past there, and it looks
like it's a hallway that was once used for storage
of some kind, but the first thing that catches you
is that strange chemical smell is extremely strong
in this room, and your eyes burn as soon as the
doorway opens and you have to close your eyes.
Thorbir, you see Vax kick the door open.
MARISHA: Wait. Vax, slow down.
WIL: I follow him.
MARISHA: You guys.
ORION: I do not follow.
MATT: You do not follow? Okay, Tiberius stays
back. You guys are all staying there?
WILL: I'd like to call everyone together, if I
could, first. Let's take a moment.
LIAM: I'm just looking. I take another potion,
because I have one more. And I'm going to look
down the hall.
WIL: Wait, friend. I give him a potion of superior
healing.
WILL: You know I'm a healer, right? You can save
your potions.
LIAM: Save it. What's that? Superior is a 4d4?
MATT: Superior's another 4d4, yeah. You guys can
take a short rest, if you wish to, and also use
your hit dice.
MARISHA: Can I get some healing? Will you use some
of that positive energy on me?
WILL: Of course I will.
ORION: I will go no further until I take a proper
rest.
LIAM: I'm just going to look down that hall.
MATT: Okay. Both of you guys, as you enter the
room, and your Darkvision looks out, you see the
room that has that strong chemical scent, parts of
the wall have crumbled in sections, ruining this
long, empty hallway. You can see there are
elements of broken boxes and crates that have been
sundered or removed or destroyed in the collapse.
But what catches your attention, too, is a large
portion of the floor seems to be lower than the
rest of it. There is some sort of a liquid that
has largely overtaken the entirety of this room.
Something has seeped through from some unseen
source, and has slowly, over time, dissolved a
large pit into the center of this hallway. This
dull yellowish-green liquid now fills the entirety
of the center portion of this hallway for a good,
let's say, about that distance, there.
LIAM: Okay. I put my hand on Thorbir's hand and
guide him back out and shut the door and say, it's
fucking acid in that room. I just sit on the
ground.
WIL: Of course it is.
MARISHA: Vax?
LIAM: I'm back in the hall with you. Acid-filled
room. I'm going to rest. Let's all just take a
breather.
MARISHA: Can we make camp? I'm hurting really
bad.
WILL: Let's take a moment here.
ORION: I agree. We've been hit pretty hard, pretty
quickly.
LIAM: Do you want to camp, or do you want to take
a breather?
MARISHA: Just take a rest. Actually, I have
something that I think will make us all feel
better. And I prepare a Heroes' Feast.
ORION: You have those?
MARISHA: I do now.
ORION: What does that do?
MARISHA: I'll tell you.
ORION: Are there bananas?
LIAM: It's a 20-foot-long hoagie.
MARISHA: Yes, it's the 20-foot-long Subway
dealio.
WILL: No, not Subway.
LIAM: Too soon.
(laughter)
MATT: Marisha. Just a heads-up. One of the
material components is a gem-encrusted bowl that
costs 1000 gold pieces that is consumed by it. You
can totally cast this, but you'll have to deduct a
thousand gold off your personal gold supply.
WILL: How much money have you got?
MARISHA: Like 3k, I think.
WILL: You have 3k? You said you were single?
MARISHA: All right, fine. I'll do it.
MATT: All right.
MARISHA: You guys, I've just had a near-death
experience. I've been craving some lasagna. Okay?
So I'm going to make some of the best goddamn
lasagna we've ever had in our life. I'm going to
spend a thousand dollars and make some amazing
fucking lasagna.
ORION: What are dollars?
MARISHA: A thousand gold.
WILL: What's lasagna?
LIAM: It's a tribal food that her people eat. It's
vegetarian.
WILL: If she's spending the money, I'll eat.
MATT: So as you guys take a few moments to tend to
your wounds and catch your breath, Keyleth finds a
section of the center of this dank, dreary prison
and concentrates, taking this gem-encrusted bowl
and setting it in the center of the floor. As time
goes on, you begin to see this strange, shimmering
energy in the center of the room. At the end of
the ritual, she raises her hand in the air, and
through a plume of whitish-silver smoke that
slowly dissipates, you can now see there is a long
table. A very well-crafted table in the center of
the room, with chairs and benches, and an
extremely well-prepared, incredible-smelling meal.
Fruits and breads and meats all just strewn about
this table in the center of this prison.
MARISHA: Okay, everybody. Close your eyes. Okay?
Tiberius, will you make the little forks dance for
me with Mage Hand?
ORION: Sure.
MARISHA: Okay. Are you guys ready? (singing) Be
our guest, be our guest,
put our service to the test!
WILL: Is this a thing? Is this happening right
now?
MARISHA: Look, I'm making a musical out of our
food. People pay a lot of money for this.
LIAM: She set it out. Have a seat. Eat the food.
ORION: Thank you, Keyleth.
MARISHA: I thought that was funny.
LIAM: I just start eating. I'm wiped out.
MATT: All right. You guys can use as many hit dice
as you want to heal yourself. If you check on your
sheet, it has a hit dice number. Use those to heal
yourself naturally.
MARISHA: So after we eat all of this food, we are
cured of all diseases and poisons. We become
immune to poison and being frightened, and all of
our wisdom saving throws have advantage. Also, our
maximum hit points increase by 2d10.
WILL: For how long?
MARISHA: 24 hours. And you gain the same number of
hit points. So don't spend any of your hit dice.
We're going to eat our way to health.
MATT: Well, no. You still spend your hit dice.
Meaning, you gain 2d10 hit points.
MARISHA: And it gains the same number of hit
points. Oh.
MATT: So you increase the maximum and you heal up
what you gained.
MARISHA: Okay. I see what it means.
WILL: So how do you heal yourself, then?
MATT: Where it says hit dice, on your page? It
should be toward the middle, right above your
attacks.
WILL: Yeah.
MATT: You can spend up to your top level and you
roll a dice with the number you have for your hit
dice, and you heal that much. So what's the number
that you have there?
WILL: Total is 11. 1d8 plus three.
MATT: So you can spend up to 11 if you want to,
and heal up that much naturally.
WILL: But I wasn't taking any damage. That's the
thing.
MATT: Then you don't have to worry about it.
You're fine.
MARISHA: Why did you burn all of your sorcerer
points? We told you not to burn all of your
sorcerer points. We don't have time to sit here
and take a full rest.
WILL: I can still cure everybody, you know. I can
heal everybody. The wounds.
MATT: Use your hit dice to heal yourself. You
commence on the meal, and
it is a very delightful meal.
MARISHA: You can ask the group, but I have a
feeling that Vax and Thorbir aren't going to want
to take a full rest down here.
LIAM: He's going to get gone. That guy or that
gal.
WILL: Both of them.
WIL: It's a thing.
LIAM: I don't want to go on a date with it. I want
to kill it.
WILL: So while we're sitting here, can I cast
Locate Creature? Oh, wait. Here's a question that
I have. How much time has passed since the last
time I cast it?
MATT: I'd say, with shopping time, it's probably
been about six hours.
LIAM: We're on the clock, here.
MATT: How long does it last?
ORION: We're still on day one.
WILL: It lasts for up to an hour.
MATT: So yeah, you'd have to re-cast it.
WILL: Yeah. But that's my question. My level-4
spells, I cast three of them last game, so do I
get those back for this one? They're gone, right?
I can't cast. So that's what I thought. I can't
cast Locate Creature. I wish I could help.
MATT: Yeah, Locate Creature currently cannot be
cast. You spent all your 4th level.
LIAM: How long does everything last from that
feast, Keyleth?
MARISHA: 24 hours. So we can still take a long
rest and still have benefits from the feast. It
lasts for 24 hours.
WIL: If we wait, it escapes.
WILL: He's a day longer away, and we only have
three days to do this.
WIL: And who's to say more guards won't come down.
How will we explain ourselves to them? And what if
those things come back?
MARISHA: I actually have a Locate Creature spell.
I can do it.
ORION: Well, I'll tell you this, everyone. I have
only a limited amount of spells left to be
effective in a fight against a creature like this.
I have no melee offenses towards this creature,
whatsoever, so that's going to be up to you with
magical weapons and whatnot, I'm assuming. I'm
virtually tapped out of all my spells. So is the
cleric, as well. So if we move forward, that's
fine. We're only six hours in on the first day of
this contract.
MARISHA: Well, the cleric is burned out of
4th-level spells. Cleric is good.
WILL: It's time or it's strength. That's what
we're talking about. We wait and we go in, fully
charged. Or we go now and we have a much better
chance of catching up to it, but weakened.
ORION: I will follow the group.
WILL: As will I.
WILL: You're in charge. What do you say?
WIL: Oh, now I'm in charge?
WILL: You've always been in charge. Because you
chose not to lead was your own fault.
WIL: We go.
WILL: We go.
MARISHA: Can I get another healing spell, then,
Cashew?
WILL: Why don't I do Mass Cure Wounds on
everybody?
MARISHA: Oh, that would be great.
LIAM: I'm already good.
WILL: You're good?
LIAM: Yeah. I flip my last potion to Keyleth. It's
a superior.
MARISHA: So what are those? 2d8?
MATT: It's 8d4 plus eight. Did you use your hit
dice to heal yourself?
MARISHA: I did. 8d4?
MATT: 8d4 plus eight. Big heal.
WILL: Let's see if you're even going to need me to
mass cure.
MARISHA: (quietly) Let me get more d4s out. I'll
do this twice. That will be enough. Four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine. Oh, that's good. Eight,
so that's 15, 19, 22, plus another eight?
MATT: Plus another eight, yeah.
MARISHA: So 30. Cool. Awesome.
WILL: So is everybody good? Anybody need healing?
ORION: I'm fine.
WILL: You sure?
MARISHA: I mean, you knew we were on a time
crunch, Tiberius.
ORION: We have days left.
MARISHA: We were chasing him down a hall.
LIAM: We don't have an egg timer. He just ran down
here. He could fly to Timbuktu. Go to Kraghammer.
Hang out with Johnny Kraghammer.
ORION: (laughs) I like Johnny Kraghammer.
WILL: Johnny Kraghammer.
LIAM: Long story, Kash. Let's go. I'm going to
slowly push that door open and try to use
perception in the room.
MATT: In this room?
LIAM: Yeah. If that crud is moving.
MATT: Okay. Were you about to do something,
Keyleth?
LIAM: And try to see a door on the far end.
MARISHA: Actually, you know what? Here's what I'm
going to do instead. Let me double-check and make
sure I can do this.
MATT: As you look inside, you walk up to the
liquid. It looks like there is a very slow flow to
it, coming at an angle. It's very thick and looks
like it's melted through the basis of the floor
and almost like it would continue under, around,
and out of this room into whatever is beyond. You
get a feeling there is something to why this part
of the prison was probably abandoned.
LIAM: Wait a tic. Wait a sec. I back out slowly,
and I'm going to creep back to the other door.
That other one, yeah. Perception check there, as
well. That's 16.
MATT: Okay. The door is not currently locked.
LIAM: Okay, and does that count for the traps, as
well?
MATT: Yeah, it's not trapped, either.
LIAM: Okay, so I'm going to open it an inch and
see what I can see.
MATT: Look inside. There is a large collapsed pile
of rubble. Whatever this room once was has
entirely collapsed on itself. You can see, it's
pushed up against the door. Something made this
room inert, and it's not currently functional.
LIAM: Acid, it is.
WILL: Acid alley is the only way to go.
WIL: Wait, there's a door at the end of this
hallway.
LIAM: That's what I just looked in.
WIL: A third door.
LIAM: Oh, a third door. I thought there was two.
WIL: There's a third door. I once knew someone who
met a bad fate in acid. I would prefer to not
encounter it myself.
ORION: Yes, I agree.
WIL: He was a good man.
ORION: I heard he was brave. Very brave.
WILL: I never heard about this. How did you hear
about this?
WIL: He was a good man who was murdered by the
gods.
ORION: It is legend.
WILL: The acid guy is legend? All right.
WIL: I go walking down the hallway, this way.
MATT: Okay. Keyleth, what are you doing? You're
meditating?
MARISHA: Let me wait until he opens this door.
MATT: Okay.
WIL: I'll make a perception check at that door.
MATT: Go for it.
WIL: 11.
MATT: All right. The door does not appear to be
trapped. You don't know if it's locked yet. It's
hard to tell.
LIAM: Just, allow me. You're strong.
WIL: That's what they say.
LIAM: That's 27.
MATT: It is also, from your perspective, not
locked or trapped.
MARISHA: Okay, now I'm going to drop to my knees
and cast Locate Creature.
MATT: Okay. As you're finishing your small ritual
for Locate Creature, you open up the door, and it
is a spiral staircase that leads upward. You get
the sensation this is where those earlier Bastions
were coming from.
WILL: No acid.
MATT: No acid in this room, no.
MARISHA: Just a staircase up?
MATT: You finish Locate Creature, and you sit
there, and you can sense, grasping on that one
encounter you had with the rakshasa, though it was
still disguised as a dwarf, and the descriptor you
have. And you recognize this immediately. This is
the same type of ritual that you did earlier, and
so there's now this weird, synchronous moment that
you share magical knowledge.
WILL: And she has money.
MATT: And she has money. Though a thousand less,
now. You finish your concentration for a second,
and the divine energy pulls you in a direction,
and it pulls you in the direction of this way.
MARISHA: I'm sorry. I think we're going to need to
go through the acid.
WIL: Very well.
LIAM: My armor is resistant to acid. Let me lead
the way. Is there any shit sitting around? Any
rubbish?
MATT: There are clumps of what looks like a
destroyed crate, pieces of stone that have fallen
from the partially collapsed walls.
LIAM: I'm going to pull up a plank of that crate.
ORION: As he's doing this, I cast Fly on Thorbir,
Keyleth, the cleric, and Vax. And myself.
MATT: You can only cast it on three people.
ORION: I can cast it at 6th level.
MATT: 6th level. It's one additional person per
spell level.
ORION: I'm terrible at math. Not Vax.
WIL: With your math and my rolling, we are a
formidable team.
ORION: Us four.
MATT: All right. It's a 3rd-level spell, so you
can do four. Okay. So against who?
LIAM: Everyone but me.
MATT: Everyone but you. Okay. So.
MARISHA: Oh, wait. We brought the flying carpet
with us. It's in your Bag of Holding.
WILL: You have a flying carpet?
ORION: Oh. Yes.
LIAM: Well, there's that.
WILL: That would be helpful. To fly over things.
Like pools of acid.
MARISHA: Why don't we pull that out?
WILL: Yeah. That's a good idea.
MATT: As you're pulling out the flying carpet,
we're going to go ahead and take a break. Quick
restroom break for about five minutes or so, and
we'll come right back to continue as they enter
the room with a rather large pit of acid. We'll be
back in five minutes, guys. See you in a second.
MARISHA: Acid pit!
[break]
MATT: Welcome back, guys! Before we get back to
the game, Orion, you want to talk
about that video?
ORION: Yeah. That Disney princess shit you saw was
Lewberger, and they're playing tomorrow at Gather
Your Party on this channel, and I will be
performing songs with Alex Lewis, who's half of
Lewberger, and I get to call Zac a dumdum for
once. Zac the dumdum played the one video that I'm
not in.
ZAC: Technically, the video I was sent ten minutes
before show started.
ORION: Was through Alex, so he's the dumdum now.
Sorry about that, for the confusion. That's what's
going on. You'll see me dance like a monkey
tomorrow.
MATT: Yeah. That's okay. It was a hell of a way to
break the tension, so it worked out well. All
right, so as the rest of you have found your way
into this long, partially eroded hallway
containing this thick green viscous liquid, you
have pulled out the flying carpet?
MARISHA: Yes. We all fit on it, right?
ORION: Oh yeah, we can all get on this one.
LIAM: Do you maybe want to sparrow across,
Keyleth?
MARISHA: Oh! We took a short rest. I could.
LIAM: Then I get to come.
WIL: What's happening?
MATT and MARISHA: We have flying carpets.
MATT: Built by some of our amazing Critters. I'm
going to go ahead and go with the crocheted one
tonight.
WIL: That's fantastic.
WILL: Crocheting is fantastic, and a wonderful way
to spend your time.
WIL: You guys have the best fans.
MATT: We really do.
LIAM: You guys are pretty great.
MARISHA: Okay, we all fit! We're good.
LIAM: Oh, we all fit on it? Oh, look at that.
MARISHA: Let's go.
MATT: All right.
MARISHA: Onward!
MATT: You drift down the hallway on the flying
carpet.
LIAM: Staring at the slime on the ground.
MATT: The air itself, like I said, it hurts. You
have to continuously rub your eyes
and keep them shut.
MARISHA: I make a nice little wind zephyr to give
us a little airflow.
MATT: Okay. As you move partway through this
section, everyone make a perception check.
ORION: Oh, natural 20.
WILL: Nice.
WILL: 19.
MARISHA: 19.
MATT: Who's helming the magic carpet, by the way?
LIAM: Looks like Kash is.
ORION: I am helming the damn magic carpet, of
course.
MATT: All right. So you're helming the magic
carpet.
WIL: I rolled a six plus a 12 total, 12.
MATT: And you rolled a total of what?
ORION: Natural 20.
MATT: Natural 20.
LIAM: 26.
MATT: So pulling forward, as you come around
through the sections of the wall that are
collapsed in rubble, you notice that there are
some sigils in the wall. Two-foot-high
carved-stone sigils about five feet ahead of you
guys. There's one on each side.
ORION: Are they infernal?
MATT: It is not infernal. They are arcane in
nature, though. Make an arcana check.
LIAM: Sometimes I really hate this old-world
shit.
WILL: Can I do a religion check on them?
MATT: You can, yes.
ORION: I got ten, so I figured.
WILL: 15.
MATT: Okay. There doesn't appear to be much
religious connotation to these symbols, but
they're old, and it looks like they were placed
there for a specific reason. That's as much as you
can get from it.
LIAM: Can I make out any traps or anything in the
ceilings or the walls?
MATT: You can make a perception check. Tiberius
points it out to the rest of you guys, and you can
see it.
LIAM: But nothing in addition to that.
MATT: No. Especially for you, your experience
doesn't fall too much in the realm of the arcane.
MARISHA: Could I do a history check?
MATT: You can try.
MARISHA: Why not?
LIAM: How about handle animals, man?
MATT: Try every skill. Just go through the whole
list.
MARISHA: 12.
MATT: Yeah, there's nothing really historic about
this, other than the fact that you're in the
historic Amaranthine Oubliette prison here.
WIL: Did anyone make an arcana check? And we
didn't find anything out? Is this something that
my stonecunning skills would be relevant to?
MATT: It's not structural. In looking at it, it
looks like these were added to it once it was
built, although it is a storage room, so it's
strange that these would be placed in the center
of the room.
WIL: Would I make an insight check, perhaps? No,
that doesn't apply.
MATT: Insight's more for individuals and motives.
MARISHA: Wisdom saving throws. Continue.
WIL: I just don't want to be over this acid
anymore.
MATT: Okay, so you push forward?
LIAM: It's going to be all right.
WIL: That's what my friend thought.
MATT: You push forward. You get about here as
you're passing through the two sigils, and there's
a flash from the sigils. They glow bright, and
it's almost like two flashbulbs go off from side
to side. You stop. The carpet dips. As in, the
carpet goes limp.
ORION: I cast Fly on all of us.
MATT: Okay. As the carpet goes limp, you all begin
to plummet forward. You need to go ahead and make
a concentration check.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
MATT: It's with your constitution modifier.
ORION: 16.
MATT: 16? Okay. So you cast Fly multiple times?
People begin to lift up, and then the spell fades.
There is something about these sigils that is
cancelling magic. However, the carpet is now going
limp and all of you are now plummeting down
towards the acidic surface below. Your action was
casting Fly. There is one piece of open ground
here that can fit maybe two people.
WIL: Thorbir dives for it.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Can I cast Wall of Stone and make a big
stone underneath of us to support the carpet?
MATT: Go ahead and roll a concentration check.
MARISHA: Let's use this one. Add my what?
MATT: Constitution saving throw, essentially, is
what it is.
MARISHA: Constitution saving throw? Why?
MATT: This is to maintain your concentration as
you're falling.
MARISHA: 13.
MATT: Yeah. Unfortunately, due to the jostling,
you're unable to get the spell out in time.
Thorbir. Who else is jumping for the platform?
MARISHA: I go eagle.
MATT: Okay, you go eagle form. Keyleth catches
herself before plummeting inside and goes giant
eagle form, gliding past without an issue.
Tiberius is falling. I want you guys-- Tiberius,
Thorbir, Vax, and Kash-- to all make dexterity
saving throws.
LIAM: Tell me how I would go about doing this. As
I fall with the carpet, I want to try to pull up
on the carpet and land in the shit.
MATT: Okay. Make an acrobatics check.
LIAM: 27.
MATT: 27. All right. What was your dex?
WIL: 14.
MATT: 14.
ORION: 17.
MATT: 17.
WILL: 12.
MATT: 12. So Thorbir and Tiberius make it onto
that small platform and barely catch yourself
before plummeting into the liquid. However,
Brother Kash, you (splash). And it's about
waist-deep from where you impact. (sizzling)
Immediately, you feel this horrible corrosive
burning sensation. You, grabbing the carpet, lift
and drift and come down into the section. This
section has eroded more, and you are about to go
up to your shoulders. Immediately, the two of you
suffer 18 points of acid damage.
LIAM: I'm wearing acid-resistant armor.
MATT: So you take nine points instead.
MARISHA: Can I fly and pick up Brother Kash, as an
eagle, and try and fly and drag him to the shore?
ORION: Don't worry about him. Is he a gnome?
MARISHA: No, he's a human.
ORION: Get the carpet from him instead.
MATT: You're barely catching yourself. She's over
the other way right now. You, however, are
submerged in the liquid now.
LIAM: Am I under?
MATT: You're having to tread. You are now
underneath. Yep. You are completely submerged.
LIAM: Is the carpet with me?
MATT: Carpet is with you.
LIAM: Under the acid.
MATT: It is currently (sizzling) in the acid.
LIAM: Well, that did not work.
WILL: (laughs) No.
MARISHA: Wait, carpet's in the acid?
MATT: With him, yes. You guys are still on the
edge there. You reach over and grab him--
MARISHA: Grab the carpet. Grab the carpet with
you, Kash!
WILL: (grunts) He reaches out and grabs the
carpet, even though it's sizzling.
MATT: The carpet takes 16 points of acid damage.
As you're taking your turn to pull it out as opposed
to trying to escape from that point, you take
another 15 points of acid damage, until eventually
you're pulled out from the entire pool and carried
over to the other side and then dropped on the
other side, both of you guys pulling the carpet
out. The carpet itself, its color has dampened.
Portions of the corners of the carpet have
dissolved, and you can see the liquid on it is
still eating away at the actual fibers of the
carpet. You're still submerged. You take another
18 points of acid damage, reduced to nine again.
Same as you took last time.
And what are you doing?
LIAM: Me? I'm trying to climb up onto the rock
that is right there that I didn't jump onto.
MATT: Right here? There's only enough room for two
people.
LIAM: Who's on it now?
MATT: Currently, Tiberius and Thorbir.
LIAM: Well, I guess I'm swimming through acid,
then.
MATT: You can try and get on there, but you'd
probably push somebody else off.
LIAM: No, I'm just going to start wading towards
the other side.
MATT: Okay. Athletics roll. It is a very thick,
gloopy liquid.
LIAM: That's all right because I rolled a 19, so
that is a total of 21.
MATT: 21. That'll be enough to get you just
towards the edge and you (grunts) pull yourself
out onto the side of the stonework, taking a final
13 points of acid damage, halved because of your
armor. You take seven. (pants) On the side, both
you and Kashaw are catching yourself, wiping it
off the parts of the flesh. You can see, there's
scarring on your skin from where the liquid began
to dissolve some of the flesh on the outer layers.
The carpet itself is still (sizzling). The edges
of it are starting to burn away and dissolve.
MARISHA: Can you Prestidigitation that shit off?
MATT: He's across the way right now, currently on
the small platform with Thorbir. What are you guys
doing right now?
WIL: I want to look at the walls and see if
there's hand-holds or some other way that I can
try to go across the wall. You know, God of War
style.
MATT: Looking at it, there are parts of the walls
that have slowly become pockmarked from the
proximity of this caustic vitriol. They're few and
far between. You can attempt to do a leap,
parkour-style, but that would be a pretty hefty
feat of acrobatics to do so.
WIL: Well, as you may know, acrobatics is
something we heavy plate mail-wearing dwarves are
extraordinarily good at. Is she still an eagle?
Eagle! Hey, eagle!
MARISHA: (caws)
MATT: Swoop over.
LIAM and MARISHA: (screech)
MATT: You grab Thorbir?
MARISHA: Actually, eagles sound like shit. They
use a raptor or something like that. Eagles don't
actually sound like that. Eagles are actually
like, (weak squawk).
MATT: They use an actual raptor sound they record
from the wild to dub the eagle.
WILL: They carry tiny little microphone things
right here.
MATT: Yeah, they have to construct eagle noises in
post.
WIL: It's all part of the great eagle conspiracy.
WILL: It's all Foley. Everything with an eagle.
Frank Welker is the sound of every eagle that's
ever been out there.
(laughter)
LIAM: I saw this great documentary about it on
YouTube.
MATT: Giraffes, foxes, eagles.
WILL: It's all Frank Welker.
WIL: Every other animal, Dee Bradley Baker.
ALL: Dee Bradley Baker!
(laughter)
MATT: So are you grabbing Tiberius or Thorbir?
MARISHA: Tiberius. (caws) Sorry! He's more
important. (caws)
ORION: I'll take out my Mending Wheel when I land,
and grab the carpet.
MARISHA: Fix that shit.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: And then I go back for Thorbir.
MATT: Okay. You take Thorbir and lift him back
over. Magic carpet has sustained fairly hefty
damage and currently, the way you're reading it,
its enchantment is fading.
MARISHA: Hurry. Quick! Come on, Tiberius.
ORION: What, I'm fixing it! I'm using the Mending
Wheel.
MATT: Okay. You take the Mending Wheel, and you
set it up.
MARISHA: Maybe get the acid off it first.
ORION: I Prestidigitate it off, first. There.
WILL: How are you doing?
LIAM: I can walk. I can fight. I'm not as pretty.
WILL: Let's heal.
MARISHA: And remember, if everyone rolled 2d12,
you get that added to your maximum hit points,
from your meal.
WIL: Thorbir is pushing himself back as far away
from the acid as he can possibly get. He doesn't
care how ridiculous he looks.
MATT: Okay. As you're keeping yourself at the
back, you can see it's all flowing in this
direction, slowly. It looks like there's a section
of the wall here that's somewhat open, and you can
see there's a pathway where it's flowing through
this direction, and it's coasting and flowing out
underneath the wall on this side. So you're
keeping a close eye on that. You've finished
assembling the Mending Wheel. You take the flying
carpet and set it on there. The wheel begins to
rotate, and as it does, the carpet curls up,
almost like heat to a hair. Curls up on its own
and begins to formulate this small cluster of
material. You can see where a lot of its vibrant
color is gone and left with dark, charred, and
partially eaten-away cloth and cotton. I'm going
to ask you to make an arcana check to attempt to
use your concentration and knowledge of magic
enchantment to maintain it.
ORION: 18.
MATT: 18 vs the damage dealt. Okay, as the Wheel
spins and spins, you can see as the color is
fading and fading and fading, the spark of
enchantment sputters and sputters, and then the
threads of the flying carpet begin to reattach and
reform, and areas where the damage to the carpet
begin to ravel back out into a fully functional
formed carpet. The Mending Wheel eventually comes
to a stop. The spokes of it collapse inward, and
the carpet unfurls. A solid, seemingly untouched
piece of material... A mundane carpet.
WIL: Well, that could have gone better.
WILL: It was a nice carpet.
ORION: It was a waste of fucking time. Let's press
on.
WILL: I'd like to Mass Cure Wounds first.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Fuck.
LIAM: Vex is going to kill us.
MARISHA: Yeah.
WILL: Who is that?
LIAM: My sister.
MARISHA: Oh god. We just heard them scream from
the other room. Oh my god.
LIAM: On a delay, they just saw it.
MARISHA: Yeah, they did. We're sorry!
LIAM: The other half of the party saw it die. 20
seconds after it happened, and we heard them
scream from out there.
MARISHA: Why are you being so poopy today,
Tiberius?
ORION: I'm cranky because I haven't slept, that's
why.
LIAM: Can we just take a moment for the carpet,
please? We've had a lot of good times
with that carpet.
ORION: Yeah. Too bad, right?
MARISHA: We've had a lot of good times.
WILL: You've had that carpet for a while?
LIAM: We found Clarota on that carpet. Never mind.
Let's not talk about that. (sighs)
MARISHA: Fuck.
WIL: Thorbir has no attachment to this carpet. I'm
looking for exits.
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make a perception check.
ORION: Nor does Tiberius.
LIAM: Well, I do. And my sister's going to kill
me, specifically.
MARISHA: Vex is going to be so angry.
ORION: This is a death march.
WIL: 15.
MARISHA: I give Vax a hug.
WILL: Are we curing the wounds, too?
MATT: Yes. What's the total amount of cure? Mass
Cure Wounds?
WILL: I want to cast on everybody, if I can.
MATT: I would say Mass Cure Wounds, as a tactical
standpoint, is a better thing to save for combat
because it's a thing you can do one round, and you
can heal everybody.
WILL: Oh, okay.
MATT: So you'd more want to spend your level-1
spells and cure people as you go.
WILL: Yeah, I think I'd like to do that. I'd like
to at least cure myself with
my level-1 cure, then.
MATT: Okay, go for it. Looking at this area, the
wall is solid stone. There is no apparent exit.
You take a while and inspect the wall, but it just
seems to be solid walls. Either the exit may have
been part of the collapsed wall, or there is no
exit to this room.
WILL: Equal to 1d8 plus my spellcasting ability.
WIL: I can't seem to find a way out of here.
LIAM: (groans) Sorry.
WIL: Maybe your skills could be useful. There's
time to mourn the dead. And the carpet.
MARISHA: It's like a member of our family, man.
LIAM: Got an 18 on perception.
MATT: 18 on perception.
LIAM: So we're at a dead end on the other side of
this shit?
WIL: I certainly hope not.
MATT: Looking around the wall, you can see there's
a section where you both look over on the far end
in the corner, and there is a small panel of stone
that seems to have a slight mismatch in the
texture of the rest of the wall. As you both
look at the wall, you see it and you take that cue
and walk up and shove the plate at the side and it
(stone scraping) glides to the side, slightly. And
there is a small three foot by three foot entryway
that exits this side of the room.
MARISHA: We almost lost the carpet that one time,
too, and we found it.
WILL: She's still talking about the carpet.
MARISHA: I'm sorry.
WILL: I was literally just swimming in acid.
LIAM: Look, Tiberius, it has sentimental value.
We'll put it in Greyskull Keep.
Just put it in the bag.
MARISHA: We can hang it up like a tapestry. That
would be nice.
ORION: No, we can make it fly again.
MATT: As you guys are having this conversation,
Thorbir has disappeared through a small pathway
that he and Vax both found.
LIAM: Folks, we're moving! And I follow him.
MATT: You step through a 15-foot corridor that
immediately opens into another room that has a
small lower foyer area and a slight step up into a
large contained room. This room is not as dark as
everything else you've gone through, as far as
light source. This room has a very faint series of
braziers along the walls. They have almost a
slight ember torchlight lighting the vicinity.
Looking inside, you can immediately see what looks
to be another small stream of that same acidic
vitriol that is slowly pouring across the floor,
and this appears to be the source that you saw
before that has been trickling through and is
eating into the side of the wall immediately to your
left. Along the walls, there are sets of armor of
varying size. They're set up as ornamental pieces.
In the center of the room, there is a
ten-foot-tall stone statue that stands before you.
Humanoid, male, with slicked long hair that goes
to about mid-back. You see fine robes that look
beautifully carved out of this dark gray
stone. The face is very chiseled and handsome, but
at the top of the forehead, you see these two
hooked horns that continue upward. There is not
two legs, but one singular cloven hoof at the
bottom of its torso as it stands. And you can see,
from the eyes, the source of the green acidic
liquid that drips down like tears, pools on the
ground, and spills out of the room.
WILL: Well, that's not good.
MARISHA: Kashaw, does this mean anything to you?
MATT: You guys are entering after?
WILL: Yes.
WIL: I step away from the acid to my left.
WILL: Can I do a religion check on the statue?
MATT: You may, very much so.
WILL: 18.
MATT: 18. You recognize, very clearly from your
religious studies and your travels, this is
Dispater, who is one of the archdevils of the
second layer of Hell. Also known as the Iron Duke,
and is considered a master of politics and
manipulation.
WILL: The Iron Duke.
LIAM: I'm going stealth now.
MATT: Roll stealth.
MARISHA: Master of politicians and deception.
MATT: Politics and deception.
ORION: I cast Greater Invisibility.
MATT: All righty. I will say, it's at this point
that as you all assembled, you hear a voice echo
through the room. It starts off as this low
simmering growl. (growls) "I ask you all this
"question: Why do you hunt Hotis? Why do you come
seeking me dead so fervently that you would
"continue past such terrible losses and dangers?"
Looking around the room, you see no source of the
voice that seems to be either omnipresent or loud
enough that the echoing of the walls doesn't give
away any location.
ORION: Our hand is forced. We are bound by
contract. I do not personally wish to be here.
MATT: "What if I could tell you this contract you
are bound to, there are ways of getting around
"such magics?"
WIL: Why should we trust someone who chooses not
to reveal itself?
MATT: "Why should you trust someone that with very
little reason sent you to your death beneath a prison
"cell to die a pit of acid?"
WILL: We're not dead yet.
MATT: "Yet."
ORION: What is this offer that you speak of?
MATT: "You could try and kill me, and you may very
well destroy me, but I'll be back. Or we could
"choose to make a deal. Perhaps a separate
contract. Equally binding, but nowhere near as
"dangerous as this one. And I would say as part of
this deal, perhaps we could do some business down
"the road. You've already walked into my place of
business and disturbed my customers and briefly
"nearly ended my business venture for the time
being. This is a very angering thing for one who
"spends a very long time building these ventures.
And I have plans. I have plots. Looking at the
"both of you, I can see that perhaps you are not
bound by the moralities that such silly folks in
"Vasselheim seem to cling to. Am I incorrect?"
MARISHA: Why don't you come out and speak to us
face to face, Hosier? Or Hosien?
MATT: "Hotis."
MARISHA: Ah, so your real name is Hotis.
ORION: If that is your real name.
MATT: (chuckles) "It is the name you know. That is
all that is required. But I think you know as well
"as I do. For my safety, I will remain unseen, just
as your friend has. Now, will you let me leave? We
"can have this conversation in the comfort of my
own room. In fact, we can throw a small party. I
"have the means to do so. You've already proven
quite skilled at combat, and I would hate to think
"you would throw away an opportunity for what
paltry sum they're offering you
"for a temporary victory."
WIL: Thorbir steps back and blocks the door.
MATT: Okay.
WILL: Does anybody trust this guy?
WIL: No deal.
ORION: I don't think it's a bad idea.
MARISHA: He serves the god of politics and
deception.
WILL: Does he?
MARISHA: I'm assuming.
ORION: That same guy?
MARISHA: Well, I'm assuming if he's got the statue
of--
WILL: The Iron Duke himself.
WIL: I'd like to make an insight check and see if
I can get a sense of how confident he feels.
20, motherfuckers!
I want to know everything about
him. I want to know his parents' name. I want to
know his social security number. I want to know
what his bank account balance is. And I want to
know his Ashley Madison password.
(laughter)
LIAM: I want him dead. I want his house burned to
the ground.
MATT: As you're all taking in this still and very
creepy omnipresence of this Hotis character, you,
in hearing the voice, it is a very trained voice.
This is an individual that has spent the entirety
of their life manipulating and toying with the
emotions, minds, greed, and goals of others to get
its desires itself, both self-preservation and
progressive expansion of its own territory. You
can tell in its voice, there is a hint of fear and
a very heavy coating of words that are very well
practiced and silver-tongued. But you gather that
there is very little intent to follow through on
its side of the bargain, and everything is
designed as misdirection to send whatever it's
made a deal with to its eventual doom.
WIL: It dies in this room. Do you hear me? You die
in this room.
MATT: "That is unfortunate." I would like all of
you to make a perception check right now.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
WIL: 13 total.
MARISHA: Not bad. 23.
LIAM: 22.
WILL: 19.
MARISHA: 23.
ORION: Five.
MATT: Okay. Both Keyleth and Vax, looking around
the room, there is a little hint of movement, and
you look over at the statue itself. There's a
little glimmer of something shift. You see what
appears to be this amulet or necklace of some kind
that was resting around the statue. It vanishes.
MARISHA: Oh, son of a bitch. I want to cast Faerie
Fire in that direction, right where I see the
glimmer.
MATT: Okay. First off, everyone roll initiative.
MARISHA: Oh shit.
WIL: Just in case anyone was worried. If you
thought perhaps we'd slipped into some sort of odd
parallel universe where I was competent or in any
way able to do anything. Just to let you know that
we are, in fact, in the same reality, I did just
roll another one.
WILL: Good god.
LIAM: I can fly!
MATT: Okay.
ORION: Well done.
WILL: You got us so much insight, though.
WIL: Thorbir is just slow because he is processing
and dealing with the rage and anger and the
memories of betrayal that he has experienced,
having heard these sounds come from the mouths of
others before.
MATT: And with that, 20 or higher? 15 to 20?
LIAM: 19.
MATT: 19. All right. 15 to ten?
WILL: 14.
MARISHA: 13.
ORION: 12.
MATT: (laughs) Look at that. All right, so 14 was
Kash?
WILL: Yes, sir.
MATT: 13 was?
MARISHA: Me.
MATT: Keyleth. And then Tiberius. All righty. (laughs) All
right. Top of the round. You hear some footsteps.
There is a brief shimmering, and you see across
the room, a form appear in the far corner. You see
immediately this humanoid figure appear. Long,
reddish robes, humanoid body, but the head itself
is this dark gray feline tiger-like entity. This long,
pronounced feline snout. Big fangs dripping from
it, long whiskers, a sadistic grin on its face.
The amulet that was once adorning the statue now
around its neck. Where its hands are, you can see
the hands are actually backwards and upturned in
these nasty-looking claws. It continues and
releases its hands in some sort of arcane form.
ORION: Rakshasa.
MARISHA: Rakshasa.
MATT: Rakshasa.
WILL: A rakshasa!
(laughter)
MATT: And with that, Tiberius.
MARISHA: So I don't get Faerie Fire off on him
first?
MATT: No, that's going to be on your turn there.
That's what the initiative roll was for. I need
you to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw.
ORION: Hold on, what is he doing? Is he casting a
spell?
MATT: He is, currently, yes.
ORION: 4th-level Counterspell.
MATT: 4th-level Counterspell.
MARISHA: You have advantage on wisdom saving
throws. Just throwing it out there.
MATT: So you do that.
ORION: No. It shall not do nothing on my watch.
LIAM: To quote the bard. Scanlan.
MARISHA: I love that you felt like you had to
clarify.
MATT: So he goes and finishes a Charm Person spell
towards you. You release that with your ring and
the spell dissipates from his grasp. (growls) It
growls under its breath.
ORION: How can he see me, by the way? I'm
invisible, still.
MATT: He can see you.
ORION: Bastard!
MARISHA: He's smart.
MATT: Yeah. Even though you're invisible, he
looked right at you and cast the spell. You gather
that there's something about him that can see
through invisibility. With that, he's going to
move in that direction. And at the end of that,
that brings us to Vax.
LIAM: All right. Well, I earlier rolled a 32 on
stealth, but I don't know if that means shit right
now, but I'm clicking my Boots of Haste and moving
along the wall.
MATT: Along the wall here?
LIAM: No. I'm going to stay put. I'm going to
attack him. I'm going to throw-- dagger, dagger,
dagger-- through the air. (flying blades) From the
shadows. I have no idea. He might be able to see
me like the Predator.
MATT: Okay. Go for it.
LIAM: He already moved, right? So I don't get
advantage for Assassinate, but we'll see if I get
sneak attack damage. That's a three, so that's
shit. That's a nine-- 15.
MATT: 15? Misses.
MARISHA: Dagger, dagger, dagger.
LIAM: That is 21.
MATT: 21 does hit.
LIAM: That was the Dagger of Life-Stealing.
MATT: All right, so first one spins off. Second
one, he ducks out of the way. The third one hits
him in the side of the shoulder.
LIAM: Now you tell me: I was hidden in the shadows
and rolled a 32. Does that matter with him?
MATT: Right, you can roll sneak attack damage.
LIAM: Yeah! Okay. (counts quietly) 22. Yeah, 22.
MATT: 22 damage? All right. It smacks into him. It
hits him. The impact, though, seems to almost be
partially absorbed or shrugged off. You're not
entirely certain. It feels like it should have hit
harder, but nevertheless, he took damage. All
righty. Are you going to stay put?
LIAM: I'm going to move through the group,
directly counter to him, behind the statue.
MATT: All righty. That'll end your turn. Now Kash,
you are going. At the same time, one of the nearby
larger pieces of armor comes to life and steps
forward. You can now see, there is a large
humanoid form that is built out of a giant
breastplate with the shoulder pauldrons, a helmet,
and these giant stone-like fists and feet that
come lunging forward. Portions of its body are
made of a thick leather or wood structure. As it
comes bursting forward. (impact noise)
MARISHA: What's that?
MATT: You can hope to make a check on your turn.
Brother Kash, what are you doing?
WILL: Let's see how tough this guy is. Let me cast
a quick Sacred Flame-- well, first I want to move
into the room.
MATT: Okay, move there? Further in?
WILL: Yeah. I want to get it to where eventually
we're going to try to get a semicircle around him.
So closer to that area around there to get a
crescent going.
MATT: Okay, cool. This is about as far as you can
get on this turn.
WILL: Okay. Perfect. And then let's try a quick
Sacred Flame on him.
MATT: Against which guy?
WILL: Against the new entity.
MATT: All right, go for it.
WILL: That's you, right?
MATT: Yeah. He gets a saving throw. All right, it
does make its saving throw. I just rolled a
natural 19. So as you release the Sacred Flame, it
seems to almost ricochet off. There's some sort of
magical essence about this creature's
construction. That ends your turn. This entity
here is going to step forward, and you can see it
brings its fist up for a second. There's a small
gem that's embedded in one of the stone fists, and
you can see it's pulsing with stored energy. It
puts the fist forward as the rakshasa in the
background as Hotis instructs it and points
forward towards you guys. It puts the fist
forward. The gem glows red and then releases a
very familiar-looking bead of red energy.
ORION: Is that a spell? Do I recognize that as a
spell being cast?
MATT: It is a spell.
ORION: Counterspell!
MATT: You've already used your reaction this
turn.
ORION: Damn it!
MATT: (laughs) You guys look over and see this as
the red beam comes and hits the back wall and
(explosion) detonates in a large Fireball blast
that encapsulates the entire
opposite side of the room.
LIAM: I'm using Evasion. I'm going to hit the
ground and roll.
MATT: Okay. That would be a dexterity saving throw
for all of you.
MARISHA: Ooh, yeah! Natural 19. 19.
WILL: Seven.
MATT: Seven? (laughs) Fail.
ORION: 19.
MATT: 19.
MARISHA: 24.
MATT: 24.
WIL: Well, I mean, I know what you're thinking.
You're thinking, oh, clearly I haven't touched my
die because the last time I rolled my die, it had
a one on it. But in fact, I did roll another one.
MATT: I feel like we're this close to starting the
apocalypse. With each one that you roll--
WILL: One small black hole is getting a little bit
bigger in the universe?
MATT: Yeah. Somewhere deep beneath the Vatican,
there's some monk who's running around screaming
as their artifacts are cracking in half. That's
amazing. All right. Well, that is 33 points of
damage to Thorbir and to Brother Kash. Half of
that to both of you guys.
MARISHA: How much was the first one?
MATT: It was 33. So half of that would put you at
16.
LIAM: Well, what did we have to hit? I rolled a
16.
MATT: You rolled a 16? It would be a 16.
LIAM: So I made it?
MATT: So you made it. You take no damage.
LIAM: Nothing. I hit the ground and roll. Stop,
drop, and roll, people! Stop, drop, and roll.
WIL: Little busy right now, on fire.
MATT: (laughs) All right, so. That is the
creature's turn. It finishes its spell, pulls
back. However, the gem goes to a dull, dark state.
No more stored magical energy.
Kash, what are you doing?
WILL: I've got to heal myself, unfortunately,
because I'm getting down there. So I'm going to
Cure Wounds.
MATT: Okay. At what level? You can cast it at a
higher level.
WILL: I know. I'm not sure I want to, yet. You
know what? I am. I'm going to Mass Cure Wounds
right now, just because I'm so low.
MATT: Okay.
WILL: So it's level 5.
MATT: Okay, so Mass Cure Wounds.
WIL: Did you do this to them? Did you come to
watch them die when they were playing?
MATT: So that is 3d8 plus five.
WILL: 3d8 plus five. Where are the d8s?
MATT: Plus, you get a healing bonus, as you are a
healing cleric, as well.
Look under your special abilities.
MARISHA: Yeah, you get plus two to all your
healing spells.
WILL: So 3d8.
MARISHA: Nice!
WILL: Nice, okay. That's good. So 17 plus five,
you said? So that's 23.
MARISHA: Plus two.
WILL: Plus two.
MATT: Plus seven to each, since it's plus your
spell level, too.
So it's plus seven on top of that.
WILL: Plus seven? Okay, now you've confused me.
Now there's all these numbers. 17 plus two, so
that's 19. Plus five.
MATT: Yes.
WILL: Okay. So it's 24. Okay. So everybody gets
24, is that right?
MATT: 24 hit points.
MARISHA: Back up to full. And remember, you get
plus 2d12 to your max hit points because we ate
good food. Nothing beats a home-cooked meal.
MATT: Did everyone keep track of that? All righty.
So Kash, that's your move and that's your spell.
That's your turn. You're done. Keyleth, you're
up.
MARISHA: Faerie Fire, right on the rakshasa.
MATT: All righty.
WILL: Rakshasa!
MATT: You cast Faerie Fire, and you can see the
energy coalesce and dissipate.
MARISHA: Son of a bitch.
MATT: The rakshasa: unaffected entirely by the
spell.
ORION: None of our magical works against-- you
know what I'm going to say! I'm speaking Draconic
again, sorry.
(laughter)
MARISHA: I look at him, and I go, um? And now I'm
going Minxie.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Going Minxie!
LIAM: Tiger on tiger?!
MARISHA: Tiger on tiger!
WILL: There's a website for that.
WIL: I saw the show at the Bellagio. It's
amazing.
MATT: You guys watch as Keyleth now angrily morphs
into this large, white saber-toothed tiger that
roars on the ground where she once was. You can
move, still, if you wish.
MARISHA: I'm going for rakshasa, so I'm going to
head this way.
MATT: You have a speed of 40, I think?
MARISHA: Speed is 40.
MATT: So you can get right up next to it. Yep. So
you run around the side of the giant statue and
right up in the face of Hotis, personally.
MARISHA: Yeah, that's fine. Bring it.
MATT: End of Keyleth's turn. Tiberius, you're up.
Thorbir, you're on deck.
ORION: Okay. Fine. I'm going to attempt to cast
Slow on both of them.
MATT: On both of them?
ORION: 40-foot cube, 120-foot range. Center it
where it won't hurt anybody else except for them.
Actually, I think I can pick who I affect. And
that's what I do. Slow down. I think that will
affect the rakshasa.
MATT: What's the DC on it?
ORION: 17.
MATT: 17. The golem-like creature-- which, if you
want to make an arcana check right now, see if you
can ID it.
ORION: 21.
MATT: 21. You haven't seen one of these before,
but you've heard about it in passing, and you feel
like there was a story once about it. It's
referred to as a shield guardian. It is linked to
whoever wears the amulet and manages to share
damage, should the wearer take damage.
WILL: Oh, that's interesting to know.
MATT: It also slowly repairs itself over time. So
yes. You cast Slow. The rakshasa appears
unaffected. However, the guardian's movements do
seem to shimmer and shake as it's forcing its way
through the arcane net you've now cast around it.
ORION: Cool. So now it takes a negative two
penalty to its AC and its dexterity saving throws,
and it can't use reactions.
MATT: Yep.
ORION: Sweet. And I move as far away from
everything as I can.
MATT: Okay. So where are you going? Over here?
That's about as far as you can get away from
everything.
ORION: That's what I do.
MATT: All righty. That brings us to Thorbir.
WIL: Am I close enough to charge up and hit that
guardian?
MATT: You could. You could probably leap over
these. You could do that.
WIL: I would like to do that.
MATT: Okay. You leap across, grin and bear it as
you dodge over the bits of acid, cringing.
WIL: I'm accustomed to failure.
MATT: And you rush up to the side with your axe
and?
WIL: I'm going to use an action surge, so I get an
additional action. So that was my move, right? So
my additional action will be to make my attack.
Does that mean I get to do six attacks?
WILL: That's going to be six points! Go for it.
WIL: I know, right? Okay. If I'm going to use a
maneuver, do I have to declare it ahead of time?
MATT: I would say yes.
WIL: This is a commander's strike.
LIAM: Here we go. This is science.
WIL: 23.
MATT: That hits, yeah!
WIL: All right. This is a commander's strike.
"When you take the attack action on your turn, you
"can forego one of your attacks and use a bonus
action to direct one of your companions to strike.
"When you do so, choose a friendly creature who can
see you or hear you and expend a superiority die.
"That creature can immediately use its reaction to
make one weapon attack, adding the superiority die
"to the attack's damage roll." So I would like to
direct the tiger thing to attack the tiger thing.
MARISHA: I'm there.
WIL: Can I do that?
MATT: You can, yeah.
WIL: So that's with my first attack situation.
MATT: So first, roll your damage from the strike.
WIL: Six plus six slashing damage. 12 slash.
MATT: 12 slashing. Nice.
WIL: Do I roll the superiority die for her, or
does she roll it?
MATT: You give it to her. You can roll it now, and
she'll add it to her damage.
WIL: You don't want to touch this, so just roll a
d10.
MARISHA: Good to know.
MATT: So now he looks to you and gives you the
opportunity to attack the rakshasa as a reaction.
MARISHA: (roars) So I'm going to do my bite
attack. And I get to add this?
MATT: To your damage.
MARISHA: To damage? Okay, so that's 15?
MATT: 15 misses. You strike out and the rakshasa
right at your face ducks out of the way and has a
small cane to its side that it knocks your strike
to the side.
MARISHA: Sorry.
WIL: That's all right. Second attack.
MARISHA: Do I get to keep this, or was that the
only time?
MATT: That's the only time.
WIL: Ha! That's a two.
MATT: All right. You hit the side of its armor and
deflects off the side with a loud ringing sound.
WIL: Attack number three is a three. I'm guessing
13 is not good enough to hit that thing?
MATT: Unfortunately, no.
WIL: Okay, attack number four is a 27!
MATT: Hits!
WIL: How about that.
MATT: Roll some damage on that one.
WIL: This is going to be-- shoot, sorry. My thing
got moved around. Apologies. Sorry! This is
ruining the dramatic tension. This is a precision
attack, so I use a superiority die and I add it to
my damage roll, right?
MATT: That's added to your attack.
WIL: Son of a bitch! All right. Never mind, then
I'm just going to roll regular damage. That's one
plus six is seven.
MATT: Seven damage.
WIL: Fifth attack.
MATT: You have two more.
WIL: That's another one.
MATT: Roll your last one.
WIL: All right, here's my last attack. Oh, it's an
18! I crit on an 18!
MARISHA: You crit on an 18?
WIL: I crit on an 18. Son of a bitch! No, I don't!
Fuck me.
LIAM: Even your memory betrays you, Wheaton.
WIL: I know. It does. 28?
MATT: 28 I think will hit. Go ahead and roll
damage.
WIL: Great. Oh, and let me look at these things
and see if any of this useless stuff is going to
do any good for me at all. Oh, you know what? I'm
going to use this as a maneuvering attack. I can
expend a superiority die to maneuver one of my
comrades into a more advantageous position. One of
my comrades can move-- there's no point in doing
that. I thought I could move the bad guy, which is
what I could do if I had a pushing attack. All
right, so. Can I use my riposte? When a creature
misses you with a melee attack, use your reaction
and expend a die to
make a melee attack against it.
MATT: You'd do that if it attacks you.
WIL: Great. Okay, so I'm just going to remember
that I have that.
MATT: Just do your damage.
WIL: 13.
MATT: All righty. So out of the six strikes, three
make contact. You're starting to carve sections
into the leathery connecting areas of the shield
guardian. You're doing damage, but it's still
pretty hardy and holding itself up. That ends your
turn, Thorbir? Up at the top. Hotis, who is
unhappy and next to you, is going to disengage
here.
MARISHA: Do I get a free attack?
MATT: You do, yes.
MARISHA: (growls) Nope.
MATT: Nope? Okay. He's actually going to stay back
here and is going to look over and glance at...
yeah, he's going to glance at you, Vax. You see
this time, it pulls itself back and with this
grin, it catches your eye and has a slight shine
to its connection. It whispers something under its
breath. Make a wisdom saving throw.
LIAM: But with advantage.
MARISHA: Advantage! I'm so glad I made such a
hearty meal.
LIAM: Ugh, 15.
MATT: 15 total?
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: All right. For the second time in a row,
your mind is not your own.
LIAM: (robotic) I will kill you all.
MATT: You feel the will of the rakshasa take your
mind as you are dominated by it.
MARISHA: Is this something he can save from,
though?
ORION: What happened? Is a spell being cast?
LIAM: I'm possessed, man.
ORION: Oh, Counterspell. 4th level.
MATT: You currently don't have visual on him.
LIAM: Besides, you should have done that shit
already! The moment already happened. I'm
possessed.
ORION: Shut up. I'm trying to save you.
LIAM: You can't retcon that shit.
WIL: Same team!
MATT: There's a big statue between the two of you,
unfortunately, the ten-foot statue, so you
wouldn't have visual on it when it cast the spell.
This is the big statue, right there. So you are
currently dominated. It is now your turn. The
rakshasa is going to send you up behind Kash.
LIAM: Let's cut the guest visitor because really.
Really?
MATT: (laughs) It makes sense. He comes in and
heals the party and is closest to you and has no
idea that you're currently turned against the rest
of your allies. Make an attack on him.
WILL: I'm attacking him?
MATT: He's attacking you.
WILL: You suck.
LIAM: And I'm hasted. My boots are hasted. So here
I go. Oh, that's good. That is a 23.
MATT: 23 hits.
LIAM: Should I do damage on all of these?
MATT: Go ahead and do your sneak attack damage on
this one.
LIAM: All right, but there's no sneak attack, so
not that bad.
MATT: I will say this. Make a perception check.
WILL: Okay. I perceive I'm going to get my ass
kicked. Oh, good! 23.
MATT: 23. You just catch, out of the corner of
your eye, as Vax turns towards you, weapons drawn,
and swooshes up to your side. You get the
sensation that his mind is not his own, since this
has already happened once today. Doing so, you
turn to face him, negating the sneak attack.
You're aware of it. So you don't get sneak attack
damage.
LIAM: Great. Good. I mean, let's kill this guy. I
love you, rakshasa! Okay, so that first one hit
for eight. The second one is a natural 20.
(carving noises) You're already cut up. You don't
even know.
MATT: So first one was eight damage, so you take
eight damage.
LIAM: This is not sneak attack, so it's not the
worst it could be.
WILL: (laughing) It's not the worst it could be.
Thanks. I'm not stabbing you the worst I could.
LIAM: That was my life-stealing dagger, and on a
natural 20, I get the ten hit points that I cut
from him. Or whatever I get, I guess.
WILL: Do it without the smile. Do it without the
little smile!
(laughter)
WILL: Just do it without the tiny little smile!
LIAM: It was seven, which is doubled to 14.
MATT: The dice is doubled, and then you add the
modifier.
LIAM: Oh, okay. Oh, so that's much less, then.
That is an eight. And then I get ten hit points.
How does it work? It says I get ten hit points, so
I just get ten, or
do I get up to what I cut him for?
MATT: You deal damage, and then you heal yourself
ten hit points, draining the life of whatever you
damaged.
LIAM: Well, the good news is, I'm back up to
full.
WILL: Oh, that is good news.
MATT: So you took another eight damage.
WILL: I took another eight? Sweet.
LIAM: Here comes that third dagger, man. This one
is poisonous. And that hits.
WILL: (laughs) Shit.
MARISHA: Take Wil's dice.
WILL: Again, you can't get the smile off your
face! It's etched in there permanently! You suck!
Look at that.
LIAM: That is an eight, plus the poison has a DC
of 15.
MATT: Take another eight damage, and then make a
constitution saving throw.
LIAM: Roll a 15 or higher, please, Will.
MARISHA: Nope.
MATT: That's okay. You guys are immune to poison,
thanks to the meal that she made.
MARISHA: Oh, that's right!
MATT: So as he eviscerates you with the daggers,
most of the armor's absorbing a lot of the blows
and you're feeling the impact and one of them
catches you in the side, and you feel the poison
pulse into your system, but your physical body
shuts it down, and you feel yourself unaffected.
LIAM: Sorry! I'm so sorry!
WILL: And I want to look at him and go, why are
you smiling the whole time?!
LIAM: He's putting it on my face. I can't help
it.
WILL: The whole time, you're smiling!
LIAM: I'm so guilty.
MATT: Your turn to make another wisdom saving
throw with advantage to try and resist it.
LIAM: With advantage. 19 or a five. So I'll take
the 19. 21.
MATT: You've resisted the effect. Domination
fades.
LIAM: Oh man. I feel so bad about this.
WILL: You don't. I don't buy that face at all. I
don't buy it at all!
MATT: Kash, it's your turn.
WILL: Oh. Wow. My turn, huh?
LIAM: Channel it to where it matters.
WILL: (laughs) Yeah, but see, I'm the guest. Where
it matters is just getting some revenge.
So he is still--
LIAM: No, I'm good. I'm out.
MATT: As he finishes attacking, he goes, (grunts,
pants).
MARISHA: Oh, did you save from it? Dope.
WILL: I have to heal myself, somehow. I have to,
or I'm just not going to be around for a while.
MARISHA: Do it. We need our healer.
ORION: Take a potion.
WILL: I don't have any potions.
WIL: A healer dying would be like your warrior
never being able to hit anything.
WILL: That would be crazy!
MARISHA: I know. It's crazy, because it scales for
players.
WILL: I have one more level five. Oh, I can do a
level-6 Heal, if I wanted to, but I want to hold
onto my level six. I think I'm going to do my last
level-5 Mass Cure Wounds.
MATT: Okay. Go for it.
MARISHA: And that does to everybody?
WILL: Yeah. Everybody within a certain radius.
Hang on. Six creatures. Oh, you're full? That must
be nice.
MATT: 30-foot radius sphere. You can hit everybody
here, for the most part. You can hit all of your
allies there.
WILL: And 3d8 plus--
MATT: Plus five, and then plus an additional
seven. So it would be plus 12. 3d8 plus 12.
WILL: 3d8 plus 12. Okay, that's the same thing as
last time, so 17 plus 12.
MATT: 29.
WILL: Again, 29. Yeah.
MATT: So everyone heals 29 hit points. That is the
end of your 5th-level spells. You are out of
5th-levels.
WILL: I am now out of 5th-level spells.
MATT: All right. That ends Kash's turn. The shield
guardian is going to turn this way and is going to
attempt to pummel on you.
WIL: Let's do this.
WILL: Dead or alive, you're coming with me.
MATT: That is a 25 to hit.
WIL: Oh, it turns out that that hits me.
MATT: (laughs) The second one is a 13.
WIL: That does not hit me.
MATT: Okay, so the first one hits you for 12
points of bludgeoning damage as the fist slams
into you. Second one comes down, and you manage to
knock it away with the edge of your axe,
bulldogging up in its face. It also heals itself
ten hit points. As it begins to repair its form with
each progressive round, the magic energy is
sealing up the cracks and divots its armor is
taking. This leads to the end of its turn.
Keyleth, you're up.
MARISHA: All right. I'm still pretty close to the
rakshasa, right?
MATT: Correct.
MARISHA: All right, hitting it with my bite
attack. Ooh, that's much better.
Chopper, sic balls.
WIL: That's not what I heard. I heard, Chopper,
sic kid.
(laughter)
MARISHA: That just made my night, in many ways.
Okay, 21.
MATT: That does hit. However, are your natural
weapons magical?
MARISHA: Yes, they are, because Circle of the
Moon, baby.
MATT: That's right. So yes, you do bypass his
nonmagical physical immunity.
MARISHA: Yes, I do. Circle of the Moon. So that
does 1d10 plus six piercing damage. Where's my
d10s? That's eight piercing damage from my bite.
(growls) And then I do my claws,
which happen twice.
MATT: So what's the damage total on that?
MARISHA: That was eight damage. Piercing damage.
And then yeah, that's good, too.
MATT: And what's your alignment?
MARISHA: What's my alignment? I'm good. I'm
Keyleth. I'm neutral good.
MATT: Just checking.
LIAM: She's becoming the Destroyer!
MATT: And the other two attacks are?
MARISHA: 22 for the first one.
MATT: Hits.
MARISHA: Hang on, do I get two claw attacks, or
just one?
ORION: Did you say "clow?"
MARISHA: "Clow." My "clows."
MATT: What does it say for the multi-attack of the
tiger form?
MARISHA: It says-- oh, wait.
MATT: Saber-toothed tiger is the form.
MARISHA: Yeah. I have a pounce. I guess I don't
have a multi-attack. So I just have the bite
attack? Or do I also get a claw attack, as well,
as my two actions?
MATT: You do not have multi-attack with that
creature.
MARISHA: One is piercing, and one is slashing,
right? So I'll do my bite. (growls)
MATT: You bite in and as you do, it (groans) hits
you with its elbow, its backward-turned hand
trying to grasp out and push you off. As it tears
you away, you got a chunk of its meat. And for
some reason, you did a lot more damage than you
thought you would. You hit some sort of vulnerable
point in its body, or there's something about the
attack method that it did not like. (gasps, roars)
It hisses at you with this guttural tiger growl.
Tiger on tiger.
MARISHA: I go, (growls) right back to him.
MATT: You going to stay put, or are you going to
move away?
MARISHA: I'm up in his ass.
MATT: All right, so you're staying right there.
WILL: There's another website for that.
MATT: All right. Tiberius, you're up.
ORION: Move me in sight range of both of them. As
a good sorcerer would be positioned.
MATT: There.
ORION: I'll cast Silence right in the center of
the room.
MATT: Center of the room?
ORION: Yep.
MATT: All right.
ORION: Not hitting Kashaw.
MATT: Okay. There is an orb of Silence here that
fills the vicinity. All righty.
ORION: And I sit in Indian-style position.
LIAM: It's called crisscross applesauce now.
ORION: Now cast stuff, butthole! I dissipate my
Greater Invisibility spell so it can see me.
MATT: All right. Your visibility comes back. All
righty. That ends Tiberius's turn.
Thorbir, you're up.
WIL: I am attacking the guardian again, and I will
be doing another one of my commander's strikes.
MATT: Go for it.
WIL: 21.
MATT: That hits.
WIL: So I will direct you, again, to hit the
dude.
MARISHA: (growls) Bite. No. Son of a cock.
WIL: I rolled a 12 on my die, so 18. 18 points of
damage.
MARISHA: Nothing for me.
MATT: What did you roll?
MARISHA: Four, so 13 total.
MATT: It adds to the damage roll, not the attack.
WIL: Damn it! I keep looking at it and expecting
it to change.
MATT: That's okay. Your first attack hit. You have
two more.
WIL: Yeah. My second attack against the guardian.
16?
MATT: 16 does not hit, unfortunately. It beats
away the edge of your blade
with one of its giant fists.
WIL: And my last attack. 23?
MATT: 23 hits. As it pulls back from knocking away
your blade, you use the inertia to spin it around
and come down on top with your axe.
WIL: Hey, I have a dumb question, and I'm sorry.
This is at your discretion, but I can add a d10 to
my attack roll after I've made the attack roll.
MATT: You add it before I tell you if it hit or
missed. So you can roll and be like, "I don't know
"if that will hit or not. Let me add my dice to
it."
WIL: I get it. So I'm going to hit again. 11.
MATT: 11. All righty. Knocked away, and then come
down with a third hit, cracking in the center of
the breastplate. The breastplate actually
separates slightly. You can see a little of the
arcane energy holding it together underneath.
Starting to knock some damage into it. You can see
it's taken a little wear and tear. It's still
pretty hefty, but you're starting to dig into the
shield guardian. Does that end your turn?
WIL: Can I use second wind? It says I can take it
as a bonus action, but I don't know how bonus
actions work.
MATT: You get one bonus action every turn, if you
have an ability that uses one.
WIL: Oh, great. So I get hit points equal to d10
plus my fighter level.
MATT: Go for it.
WIL: 11 plus ten is 21.
MATT: There you go. Very nice. Ends your turn.
Back at the top. That is Hotis's turn. Hotis
begins looking at itself. It moves. It gets an
attack from you, Marisha.
MARISHA: That's 20.
MATT: So that does hit.
MARISHA: Awesome. I'm going to do my bite attack
again. Oh, wait. That's a d20. Eight damage.
Piercing damage again.
MATT: All right. You strike. Once again, as it
runs by, you get a chunk out of it and it (grunts)
growls in anger and pain. You notice at the same
time that she takes the bite out of it, the
guardian shudders, like it suddenly took an impact
on its own. As it charges away, though, it runs
out of the field of Silence... It is going to
begin casting a spell on itself, and immediately
drifts up toward the ceiling. It is now currently
flying in the room about ten feet up right now.
WILL: He's flying now?
ORION: I can do that, too!
MATT: That's going to end its turn. Vax, you're
up.
LIAM: I'm going to use my bonus action to hide.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: 27.
MATT: 27. Okay.
LIAM: Two daggers out of the dark. I'll keep that.
That is a 30.
MATT: Remember, in order to properly hide, you
would have to go somewhere where you would remain
out of the sight of the individual.
LIAM: Can I squat down behind Kash?
WILL: Wait, whoa.
LIAM: All right, you tell me. I don't know how
bright or dark it is in here.
MATT: Hiding behind another party member is a
little hard to do.
LIAM: Can I run, Naruto-style, low, now he's
behind me, toward the statue and crouch at the
base of it? And then shoot up from there?
MATT: Yeah. Thanks to your stealth roll, the
guardian does not see you. It can't get a
reaction, anyway, because it's slowed from you. So
yeah, you're able to scoot around to the side
there, and then fling the daggers around the
corner. The rakshasa
apparently has not noticed you.
LIAM: Okay. First roll was a 30.
MATT: That hits, and it does do sneak attack
damage.
ORION: Good job, Lara! I mean, Vax.
MARISHA: Kill this thing.
LIAM: (counts quietly) 38, for the one dagger.
MATT: 38 damage. Okay. First off, when you throw
the dagger, and it strikes, it hits the side of
the ribcage of the rakshasa who is floating up,
and (grunts) it doubles over in severe pain, more
than you expected it would be, and it clutches and
tries to grab the dagger to pull it out before it
vanishes from the wound, leaving the blood pooling
out of it. It looks like it was hurt significantly
by this attack, more so than you were expecting.
However, at the same time, the shield guardian
doubles over for a second. The link appears to be
sharing the damage between the two of them.
MARISHA: Piercing damage, yo.
WILL: When you hit either one, or just when you
hit the rakshasa?
MATT: Apparently, just when you hit the rakshasa.
LIAM: Number two. Probably going to go astray.
That was 14.
MATT: 14? Nope. All right. So that is Vax's turn.
The rakshasa, you can see, is clutching its side
now, and there's blood beginning to pool around
its robe and it (pants) is looking around with
nervous eyes. That brings us to the end of Vax's
turn. Kash, you're up.
WILL: Who's over here?
MATT: Over here?
WILL: No, near the shield warrior. Who's over
there? The shield guardian.
MATT: This is Thorbir and Vax.
WILL: Okay. I'm going to move a little bit. Even
though he's floating, I can still move closer to
the rakshasa, correct?
MATT: You can, yes.
WILL: I want to move a little bit closer and then
cast Spiritual Weapon.
MATT: Okay. All right, so you create a spiritual
weapon of some kind.
What weapon would you like to create?
WILL: How about a giant mace?
MATT: Okay, so as you clutch your holy symbol to
yourself, now there's a sudden pillar of bright,
vibrant healing light surrounded by that same halo
of pitch-black darkness, almost like this strange
border around it. This duality hits the
ground, and as it vanishes, you can see on the
ground this shimmering, almost static-y mace is
left behind, almost flickering in and out of
existence. It drifts off on its own and is now
hovering in the air next to you.
WILL: Sweet.
(laughter)
MATT: Do you wish to send it up?
WILL: I do. I wish to send it towards the
rakshasa. Concentrate all fire on the rakshasa.
MATT: Okay. What's the damage on the magical
weapon?
WILL: When I cast the spell, I can make a melee
spell attack against a creature within five feet
of the weapon.
MATT: All right, so roll a d20 and add your spell
attack bonus.
WILL: Spell attack bonus is-- 20.
MATT: 20 hits. Roll damage. It's 1d8 plus five,
which is your spell bonus.
WILL: 1d8.
MARISHA: All those blue guys. Yeah.
LIAM: Give him the Al Capone, Kash.
WILL: Five and five, so ten.
MATT: Okay. Ten points of damage. All right, so as
it slams into the side, the rakshasa (gasps) takes
the brunt of it to its arm, and the shield
guardian shudders slightly in the distance.
WILL: It says that now I can, as a bonus action on
my turn, move the weapon up to 20 feet and repeat
the attack against the creature within five feet
of it. So can I swing it around and attack him
again from the back?
MATT: You can use your bonus action to do that,
yes. So it drifts behind and makes a second
strike. Roll a d20.
WILL: A d20?
MATT: A d20 to try and hit. And add your spell
attack bonus.
WILL: Ten. Damn it.
MATT: Ten? This time, the rakshasa's a little more
wise to your plan. As it swings around, it
actually uses its Fly to dip down as it swings,
and then comes back up around in its place,
gliding and staring at it with a snarl. (snarls) I
believe that ends your turn. Now the shield
guardian turns this way and now it's taken notice
of the rogue that has run up and eviscerated a
portion of its master. It's going to pivot in
place and bring both fists
right down towards you.
LIAM: I'm going to uncannily dodge.
MATT: Okay. What does that do, again?
LIAM: Once a round, I can halve the damage.
MATT: For one attack, right? Well, that one will
be a 25 to hit?
LIAM: Oh, yes.
MATT: And that will be a 14 to hit.
LIAM: No.
MATT: So the one that hits you-- 15 damage.
Bludgeoning damage,
which is halved to eight damage.
ORION: What's above us?
MATT: Above you? It's about a 15-foot ceiling. 15
to 20-foot ceiling.
ORION: Okay. Any light coming down?
MATT: Nothing in particular, no. You just have the
wall sconces up there. This room has been
repurposed from its original construction and
hidden away. It looks like it was initially some
sort of storage or altar room, based on how it was
designed. All right, that ends its turn. Keyleth,
you're up.
MARISHA: Okay. Since he's floating, I'm going to
go, (growls) and go for the spiritual guardian.
Ooh, the first one is a 21.
MATT: That hits.
MARISHA: Oh, sorry. 22.
MATT: Is this a pounce?
MARISHA: Can it be a pounce? Was I far enough
away?
MATT: If you move back and then pounce, you
could.
MARISHA: Then fuck yeah, it's a pounce.
MATT: You have the movement to do so. So you back
up, (growls) leap, and pounce on the shield
guardian.
MARISHA: So does he succeed his strength saving
throw, DC 14?
MATT: Nope! Not with a three.
MARISHA: Then he is knocked prone.
MATT: (impact noise) Slow and prone.
MARISHA: And then I make a bite attack, which is a
19. Ooh, that's not good, in terms of damage.
Seven damage.
MATT: Seven damage. All righty. So as you jump on
it, you force it to the ground. You see the thing
topple towards you, and you have to step back to
avoid it, Thorbir. It crashes into the ground, and
now Minxie, the white saber-toothed tiger, is on
top of it, and starts biting and clawing at it,
dealing a bunch of damage to the front of its
armor. Very cool. That ends Keyleth's turn.
Tiberius, you're up. Strangely enough, none of
this makes any sound. It's a silent battle. It is
the creepiest, quietest fight over here right
now.
ORION: I'm going to cast Obelisk of Stone.
Rakshasa! The butthole. And smash the shit out of
both of them! 20 feet high. Maximum height.
MATT: Okay. I'm looking up the spell real fast.
MARISHA: Dex save.
ORION: It's a dex save.
MATT: That's a natural 20 for the rakshasa, and
that is a six for the shield guardian.
ORION: So he's pinned to the ceiling, and they
both take 21 damage.
WILL and MARISHA: (laugh)
WILL: What's that weird James Gandolfini breathing
next to me? It's really bizarre.
MATT: I'm clarifying this because the spell says
this. They make a dex saving throw, or they're
lifted by the pillar. If they make a save, they
are not touched by the pillar.
ORION: Right. That means they don't get pinned by
it.
MATT: No, they don't take any damage. If they make
their save, they dodge out of the way. That's how
the spell is designed.
ORION: All right.
MATT: It's primarily intended to be a defensive
spell that can occasionally be used offensively,
if they fail their save. The shield guardian takes
the damage.
ORION: And he's pinned.
MATT: And he's pinned, currently. Yep.
WIL and WILL: Nice move.
WILL: Get him, Stormchaser.
MATT: All right. The rakshasa dodges out of the
way, and there is now a giant pillar in the middle
of the room.
ORION: I look at him, and I'm like--
MATT: All right. That ends your turn, Tiberius?
Thorbir, you're up.
WIL: Can I hit the guardian?
MATT: Currently, it is pinned against the ceiling,
so you cannot hit it.
WIL: Right, so I can't do anything. Can I just
delay?
MATT: You can if you want to. You can use your
action to hold off until something triggers, which
could be moving into range, in case you could then
take your action on it.
WIL: I'll do that. I can't get the rakshasa.
MATT: Not from that distance, no. So you'll wait
for this thing to try and find its way out. All
right, cool. So that brings us to the top: the
rakshasa's turn.
WIL: Oh, but I am calling out, and yelling at, and
taunting at the guy. And it's just this.
(mouthing words)
ORION: Oh, because of the Silence. I'll dissipate
the spell so I can hear him. Were you trying to
say something, Thorbir?
WIL: (shouting) And I will be naked and riding
through the desert--
(laughter)
MATT: The rakshasa finishes scanning the room for
a second, and he says, "Well, this has been a lot
"of fun. I appreciate this little scuffle. However,
I have other business to attend to. Looking at the
"rest of you, at least I know where to hit you all
the hardest. I know you have a father you seek. I
"know you have family in Draconia. I know you have
a sister that is not too far from here. And you. I
"know you have one you hold dear to your heart. I
can now see your minds, see their faces, and I
"will see them soon. However, I must say adieu."
And he begins to cast--
ORION: 4th-level Counterspell!
MARISHA: Tiberius!
MATT: You already used one 4th-level Counterspell
from your ring earlier.
ORION: Yeah, and I have two stored in there.
MATT: How do you have two 4th-level Counterspells
in a ring that can carry
up to four levels of a spell?
ORION: No. I can carry five up to 4th-level
spells. It's my Ring of Spell Storing. It can
carry up to five spells that go up to 4th level.
MARISHA: No, that's not how it works.
MATT: It can carry up to four levels of spells.
ORION: I don't understand that.
LIAM: You can do four level-1 spells. You can do
one level-4 spell. You can do two level-2 spells.
ORION: That's not how it worked before.
MARISHA: Yeah. That's how my ring works, as well.
It's a level-5 Ring of Storing.
MATT: Welcome to Dungeons and Dragons. It's all
good. You have Counterspell as a spell you know,
though, right?
ORION: Yeah. Still 4th-level Counterspell.
MATT: Okay. Good to know. That makes a difference.
Let me double-check one thing real fast, because
this will make or break the circumstance, really.
ORION: As a matter of fact, no. 6th-level
Counterspell. (growling) You will go nowhere!
MATT: All right.
ORION: That's far as I can go.
MARISHA: We go to 11.
MATT: All right. It is a 7th-level spell, so let's
go ahead and roll.
MARISHA: Come on.
ORION: Do I have advantage or anything?
MARISHA: I don't think so.
MATT: Okay. Don't roll yet.
ORION: Okay.
WILL: (laughs) That's awesome. Okay. He's in
charge!
MATT: Okay, so roll a d20 and your spell-casting
ability is five for this.
LIAM: Don't piss off Tetsuo, man.
MATT: So you roll a d20. Add a five. I will say
you have advantage on this because you were
expecting and waiting for this, so go ahead and
make your first roll. Roll one at a time.
MARISHA: Okay.
ORION: 19.
MATT: 19? All right.
MARISHA: Oh, take that 19.
ORION: 19.
MATT: 19? All right. To counter this spell as a
level seven, you needed to roll a 17 or higher.
You are targeting the spell, not the rakshasa
itself. As you can see, its form begins to
shimmer, and you see a small gate begin to open
around its form. You, as a reaction, reach up and
unleash your torrent of countering arcane energy.
It hits this opening gate. The gate then
fluctuates and shuts. At which point, the rakshasa
goes, (quiet growl) and for the first time,
really, in this entire battle, looks genuinely
scared.
WILL: Yeah!
MARISHA: Fucking kill it!
LIAM: You were saying something about my sister?
ORION: (shouting) No one threatens a goddamn
Stormwind!
WILL: What he said.
ORION: I think I just broke my hand.
(laughter)
MATT: Don't break your hand! It's going to fly--
actually, it's going to fly toward the door.
WILL: Towards the door?
MATT: Yeah. That's all the movement it can get,
there, but it is heading towards the exit.
MARISHA: Oh, he's fucking trying to leave!
LIAM: He suddenly turns pink and says,
(Snagglepuss impression) exit stage right, even!
(laughter)
MATT: He's gliding toward the doorway over everybody.
That brings us to Vax's turn.
WILL: Come on, Vax! Don't let this bitch leave!
LIAM: How far is he from that statue?
MATT: From this statue here? At that height, I'd
say it's about 30 feet.
LIAM: 30 feet? Okay. He's not paying attention to
me. Can I use my bonus action to go stealth?
MATT: You're partially obscured by the statue. I'd
say you can do that.
LIAM: All right. With advantage. Come on, you
fucking motherfucker. That is 28. And I'm throwing
daggers at the back of his head. Yes. That is a
27. Do we call that sneak attack?
MATT: He did not see you stealth, actually. He did
not roll high enough perception, so you have sneak
attack on him.
MARISHA: Ugh, I'm out of alcohol. It's the worst
time to be out.
WIL: Druid needs booze badly.
LIAM: 30.
MATT: 30 damage?
How do you want to do this?
(cheering)
LIAM: I've got the dagger in my hand, right? I see
him flying away. I'm crouched down. I flip it over
so the blade's in my hand. I don't go fast. I just
take my time, pull back, throw it harder than I
usually do, through its neck, out the front.
MATT: The dagger hits it in the back of the neck
and the spine. It doesn't quite cut through the
spinal column. You see it comes out the front of
the throat. (choking noise) The spell falters.
(thud) It falls to the ground, taking a serious
impact fall and is now, (grunts) dragging itself
towards the exit of the room as you start walking
up to collect your blade. (coughing, gasping) It
brings up its hand to start trying to cast a
spell. (wet choking sound) It coughs this big pool
of blood onto the ground.
LIAM: I grab it by the ear and lift its head back.
You talk about my sister again.
MATT: (death rattle) With a spray of crimson
across the ground and this horrible sucking sound,
you pull back the head as the life force of the
rakshasa comes spraying across the stone floor. As
you release it and leave it to the ground with the
last bit of life left in its body leaves its form,
you hear this chuckle. "I'll find you."
LIAM: And I boot it into the acid.
WILL: No, we need the eyes!
MATT: (laughs) The body tumbles into the acid.
(sizzling sound) You guys run over really quickly
and pull it out.
WILL: What were you thinking?! (laughs)
LIAM: Don't push my buttons, man.
WIL: Has the animation gone out of the guardian?
MATT: The shield guardian that was currently
struggling has gone limp,
pinned against the ceiling.
WILL: Nice work.
MARISHA: Okay. I go over to it, and I bust out my
book, and I start harvesting all the parts we
need. Who's got the contract? What all do we
need?
WILL: Who has it? I don't have the contract.
LIAM: I never touched it.
WILL: We need the eyes. I didn't have the
contract.
WIL: You had the contract.
WILL: I did not. You were in charge.
WIL: I was not in charge. I was never in charge. I
was sent here to be a babysitter.
WILL: That's in charge, as far as I'm concerned.
MATT: Does nobody have the contract?
ORION: Is it behind us?
LIAM: Oh, come on.
MARISHA: We signed it, after, and left it
somewhere.
MATT: It might have ended up in the storage.
LIAM: Oh, the actual, physical--
MATT: The actual, physical contract.
MARISHA: Might have ended up in storage.
WIL: Someone from production made us sign it.
LIAM: Here it is, clearly, right here.
MARISHA: The fangs and the tongue.
WILL: Ah, yes!
MARISHA: We found it!
MATT: That would have been a real shame to get all
this far.
MARISHA: I got it. Cool.
WILL: We got it. It's all good. What do we need?
LIAM: We're fine here. Everything's fine.
WIL, LIAM, and WILL: How are you?
MARISHA: Okay, I have my book, which I think gives
me advantage, I think is how it works?
MATT: Gives you advantage on those, yeah.
MARISHA: Yeah. Okay, gives me advantage. So I have
to do this individually for each one, correct?
MATT: Correct. Roll two at a time to make it more
expedient.
MARISHA: Two at a time? Okay, first for the eyes
and tongue. Ooh, I'll take that 18 and 20.
Natural 20.
MATT: Well, it's with advantage, so the first
roll's a 20. That's for the eyes?
MARISHA: That's for the eyes.
MATT: Without a problem, pop both eyes out.
MARISHA: Tongue. I'll also take that natural 20.
MATT: There is a purpose you serve.
WILL: And it's the balance on the sides of the
room.
MARISHA: I'll take that.
WIL: I am good for something.
MARISHA: And for the heart. That's 16 total.
MATT: 16? All right. With some difficulty, you
manage to eventually tear the heart out of the
chest cavity. It's a very nasty process, and most
of you guys-- well, not so much you guys; you've
seen a lot of crimson, but watching this little
druid girl, seemingly unfazed by the process of
tearing into the chest of this rakshasa, is very
disconcerting.
LIAM: Come on, Mononoke.
MARISHA: Here, hold this.
MATT: And it is this dark, dull red, like
overcooked meat.
MARISHA: Okay. The claws. Oh, I'll take that 19!
30. Oh, sorry. 29.
MATT: You take each one of the hands of the
rakshasa, the back-turned, strange, upside-down
humanoid hands, and cut them off at the wrists,
very cleanly, and both are
harvested without issue.
MARISHA: And the canine teeth. I'll take that 15
for 25.
MATT: 25 total?
MARISHA: Total.
MATT: You take the rest of the head. You can see
this terrible grin, this perpetually pulled smile
from its final moments. You manage to pull out,
very cleanly, both of the canines from the inside
of the mouth.
MARISHA: Tiberius? Do you have any vials left
over? Empty vials?
ORION: Yes, of course.
MARISHA: Can I try and harvest some of the blood,
as well, to keep for personal use?
ORION: That's exactly what I was going to do.
WILL: (gags) For the love of-- (gags)
ORION: I'm taking some of the blood, for sure.
Filling some vials.
MARISHA: Are you squeamish about blood, Kashaw?
WILL: I'm a healer!
MATT: It's a little difficult, since a rather
large portion of the rakshasa's blood is currently
spattered across the floor, thanks to Vax. You
manage to harvest one vial of its blood.
MARISHA: One vial?
MATT: One vial.
ORION: I'm going to take my dagger out, and I'm
going to shave trimmings from his fur and his
whiskers. I'll take those.
MATT: You currently have a vial of rakshasa
shave scum.
WILL: Thorbir, you want the taint? There's tons of
magic in it.
(laughter)
WIL: I take the jeweled dagger, and I walk down to
the corpse of the rakshasa. I drive the dagger
through one of the eye sockets, and I say, you
will never harm my daughter.
MATT: The dagger is left there as a proclaiment,
and all of you feel the weight behind that
whispered statement and decide it might be best to
leave that dagger where it sits.
WIL: Let us conclude our business.
ORION: Very good.
MATT: As you've completed the harvesting, you
notice the contract, the sigils that currently
lock it, flash and seem to vanish from the paper,
your contract completed. For the sake of brevity,
you all manage to make your way-- arduously and
with much difficulty-- not through the Amaranthine
Oubliette, because that would be difficult, but
retracing your steps back through a tunnel which
has been sealed shut by iron pillars.
ORION: We have to break through those first.
Fireball, fireball, fireball. Breaky, breaky,
breaky.
MATT: That's a terrible idea. Creating explosions
in small, enclosed, earthen tunnels is a really
good idea.
WILL: (laughs) No problem.
MATT: They completed the contract, but then all
suffocated due to a sudden cave-in. It was so
unfortunate, the second team.
ORION: I had a bottle of air!
MATT: Everyone's just permanently breathing air.
It is the worst fate ever for a PC.
LIAM: Gather around. Watch what I can do!
(laughter)
MATT: It takes you a long time to retrace your
steps and find your way through the entrapment,
especially since as you remove the iron pillars,
the boulder then begins to roll past, so you carve
your way through. You make your way precariously
back to the Velvet Cabaret, back into the room
where the rakshasa once lived. Do you wish to walk
into the center of the Velvet Cabaret, covered in
various fluids?
WIL: Fuck yes, we do.
WILL: Yeah, I think absolutely.
MATT: All right. (boof) The door slams open and
you all step into the center of the Velvet
Cabaret. As you do, two of the guards turn and see
you exit. "Hey! Hey, wait! What are you doing?"
And they go for their blades to the side.
WILL: Seriously?
ORION: I turn around and go like, you really don't
want to do that, friend. Trust me, please.
MATT: Make an intimidation check.
ORION: Oh, what is that? 14.
MATT: 14? He rolled a three. He looks to the other
guy. "As long as you're leaving."
ORION: (garbled) Draconian again.
(laughter)
WIL: Thorbir just keeps walking.
MATT: He sheathes the sword, and they give a wide
berth. You can hear the music playing, and
everyone's laughing. As you enter the room, the
music comes to a stop.
MARISHA: Right before we leave, I turn and have a
piece of pelt from the rakshasa, and I throw it at
the guard's feet, and I say, here. That's what's
left of your boss.
MATT: He steps back for a second. Some of the
other patrons are watching this. Some look scared;
some look intrigued by this whole sudden arrival
of strange warriors covered in various ichor.
Watching as you step out, a swarm of them look at
the feet, and one of them goes, "Oh! They killed
"some sort of tiger!" That's not an accent.
(laughter)
MATT: Another who's watching says, "They bought
that down at the market." The guards take it and
lift it up with the blade and look strangely, and
you see, coming out of the far corner, the bashful
owner of the establishment that you had previously
knocked unconscious, looks out. Not wanting to
engage, just watching you as you leave with a look
of fear on his face. You step out onto the
thoroughfare, close the door behind you, back into
the Quad Roads district, making your way towards
the Slayer's Take guildhall.
LIAM: On the way out, I grab two glasses of ale,
and I hand one to this guy and just walk and don't
say shit.
MATT: No one argues.
WIL: Thorbir is genuinely touched by this
gesture.
MATT: As you sip, you make your way through
the main thoroughfare back to the center of the
Quad Roads to the Slayer's Take guildhall. You
step inside, and there across the way, in
mid-conversation with his wife, is Mertin, talking
to the Huntmaster, Vanessa. As you enter, they
both turn with a look of excited surprise.
"I assume that this means the contract 
went well, right?"
WIL: It's done.
MARISHA: I take a canvas bag and I plop it on the
table, full of the rakshasa bits.
MATT: (excited chuckles) He shows it to the
Huntmaster. She glances down with a smile. "Very
"good. I am glad that we gave you such a trusted
member as your overseer. You did well, Thorbir.
"Thank you for your effort in keeping these
fledglings alive."
ORION: One more insult, madam, and you will find
your whole establishment on fire.
MARISHA: Tiberius.
ORION: I'm not in the mood.
MATT: "It's not meant as an insult. I'm sorry,
perhaps you do not understand that we speak with
"terms of endearment."
ORION: Oh. Well, in that case, I take it as a
compliment.
MATT: "Very well. So, looking at the contract. Is
everything hopefully in order?" She takes it from
you, looks into the contents of the bag. "Very
well. You shall be paid out in full and scattered
"amongst your party as you see fit."
MARISHA: And our counterparts? The rest of our
party, have they returned?
Have they checked in yet?
MATT: "Not yet. They are still out at the moment.
They've been gone for about as long as you have
"been. You've returned faster than they have. Let
us hope that they are safe. But I have faith. They
"seemed very intent on completing this without
issue, so I would not be too worried. I will
"notify you upon their return, though."
MARISHA: Please do.
MATT: "Where are you staying?"
MARISHA: Where are we staying?
WILL: I thought as members of the Take, you got to
stay here?
MATT: "You could, if you like. We have room, and
technically, as of this contract, you are all
"officially members of the Take. You may stay here,
if you wish."
ORION: I need a bed. And I motion towards the
thing. I'm sleepy.
MARISHA: We'll wait here.
MATT: "Very well. We shall hold off the ceremony
for when the rest of your team arrives."
WIL: If the rest of this team is half as good as
these members, the Take has grown much stronger
this day. They're worthy.
MATT: She crosses her arms and her usual jovial,
passive attitude grows a little more stern. She
gives a nod of genuine respect towards Thorbir.
And for the first time she looks about the rest of
you with a slightly intense look of really
understanding the essence of strength between and
behind each of you. "I believe you're correct. I
think there will be great things ahead for us.
"Welcome to the Slayer's Take." She reaches down,
brings up a small wooden chest. Sets it on the
edge and opens it. On the inside, you can see it
is rather abundant in gold and platinum, of which
the total comes to-- (counts quietly) 5,100 gold
pieces for this contract.
That is 1,020 gold each.
MARISHA: 1,020 gold?
MATT: Correct.
WILL: You can split up my take amongst them. I
take it my obligation has been fulfilled?
MATT: "It has."
WILL: You know I have no desire to stay.
MATT: "If you insist. But you know that whenever
you come back to our little humble abode, you
"always have a place to stay and work at your
disposal, Brother Kash."
WILL: Thank you. He turns and looks at the rest of
his party. Well. It's certainly been interesting.
ORION: It has been a pleasure and an honor,
Kashaw. You as well, Thorbir. You are brave
warriors and would do well in the Draconian
Knights.
WILL: Thank you, Stormwind.
ORION: He said my name right!
WILL: And you. You might be the most annoying
person I've ever met in my life. With that, he
grabs her around the waist, pulls her in, and
plants one right on her.
(laughter)
WILL: Turns, winks, and walks out of the room.
WIL: Thorbir sighs heavily and is annoyed.
MATT: "Very well. Welcome to the Slayer's Take."
And with that,
we'll close this evening's session.
(laughter)
LIAM: What a button on the night!
(laughter)
MATT: Well done, guys. There were a few seriously
clutch moments in those encounters there. You were
one roll away from losing the contract. Congrats
on that. Guys, well done. Please, round of
applause for our fantastic guests these past
couple of weeks.
(cheering)
MATT: Happy to have you in the player's seat.
You've been an absolute pleasure, man.
WIL: Thanks very much. Like I said last week, it's
weird. This is out of my comfort zone, to be in
this place. But yeah, this was really fun.
MATT: Awesome. Thank you for coming to be a part.
WIL: Yeah. And I'm glad that you all got to see
that the legends are true.
ORION: It's mind-boggling.
MARISHA: It's so insane.
MATT: Absolutely surreal.
WIL: People always accuse me of taking it easy on
my players. I really don't.
(laughter)
LIAM: Dice aside, great character.
MARISHA: Keyleth got her first kiss!
TALIESIN: That was so awesome.
MATT: And Will Friedle, guys, who had never
played.
WILL: Oh, yeah. I've never played. This was a ton
of fun.
TALIESIN: You were amazing.
MARISHA: So good.
MATT: You totally gave Keyleth her first kiss.
(laughter)
WILL: And then vanish like a thief in the night!
MARISHA: Moments that Keyleth has dreamed of.
MATT: Damn, guys. All right, so we have our
donation list for the evening.
ZAC: Lots of donations tonight.
ORION: And our warlock.
(cheering)
MARISHA: We fucking lived!
MARY: How was the kiss?
MARISHA: Oh my god. I got pink in the face. In
real life.
TALIESIN: You two totally made out on graph
paper.
MARY: You did!
WILL: I want to see that artwork.
TALIESIN: Oh, it's coming. I heard the sound of
300 pencils going.
MARISHA: I have a cowboy who just rode into the
sunset, you guys.
TALIESIN: Ship. He just shipped all over.
MATT: Darin, get in here!
LIAM: Kash money!
(laughter)
WILL: I know what you've got to do to get invited
back.
MATT: Also, guys, this is a friend of the show.
Darin, another amazing voice actor who's a fan of
the show.
(cheering)
MATT: For all you Warcraft players, you've
probably killed him as Blackhand in
Warlords of Draenor.
DARIN: How dare you?!
(laughter)
MATT: And so many other great characters. I'm so
glad he could come and watch tonight.
[end of captions]
