

### A Rescued Life

Published by Suilan Lee

Smashwords Edition

**A Rescued Life** © 2015, Suilan Lee

Cover Art by Liang Woo

All Rights Reserved

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

License Notes

Thank you for downloading this e-book. This book remains the copyrighted property of the author, and may not be redistributed to others for commercial or non-commercial purposes. If you enjoyed this book, please encourage your friends to download their own copy from their favorite authorized retailer. Thank you for your support.

***

Chapter One

He'd expected death, but not like this. Not leaning on a tree in the middle of the woods with no one to avenge his death.

To be truthful, that last part was a dream too. The life he'd lived did not inspire love from others, not enough love for revenge. No, not many would notice he'd died.

Meeting his killer's gaze, he chuckled.

"I'm surprised you waited this long, Kaito."

"You are my favorite," Kaito said, then leaned to press a wet sloppy kiss on his jaw.

Toshiro clutched the dagger's handle. Gathering enough energy, he pushed Kaito off him, holding the dagger in place.

Kaito stumbled back with a soft bitter laugh.

"I'm sure we'll meet again, Toshiro."

"I'll keep you a place beside me in hell," Toshiro managed with a painful gasp.

Kaito gave him an exaggerated bow, picked up the briefcase on the ground that was the root of their troubles and ran to the black Mercedes parked on the dirt road. Toshiro closed his eyes because the lights blinded him. Seconds later, Kaito drove off in a mad dash.

Left alone to die, Toshiro leaned on the tree his left hand holding the dagger inside his gut. He had two options: pull the knife out and bleed to death, or keep it in, and hope someone would find him, and then die slow.

If he survived, Kaito would find him and finish the job. There was no one to care if he went missing, no one to cry for him or burn incense at his wake.

_Tough choice,_ he grimaced.

Pushing off the tree, Toshiro stumbled to the next tree.

"Idiot," he mumbled under his breath.

Where was he going?

He stumbled to the next tree, his fingers digging into the bark. He wished he could feel the pain, instead of the numbness spreading through him. Another tree and he stumbled; he dug his fingers into hard bark to keep his balance.

No one cared if he lived.

No one.

Why keep going?

Idiot, stop and pull the dagger out, be a man and die with honor.

Still, his feet kept moving forward, another step, another tree, another stinging branch. The night so black, he couldn't see where he was going.

Just as well since he couldn't go back home. Kaito had thrown him away. Left him to die in the woods like garbage. That truth hurt more than the dagger in his gut. He'd loved Kaito. Loved Kaito more than he would his own brother.

Not that he knew what it was like to have a brother. He'd grown up an orphan. His father unknown, his mother a drug-peddling whore who'd died at Kaito's father's hands. She'd stolen two fingers of cocaine from the man and suffered a brutal beating. He'd watched her breathe her last huddled in the corner of the little room Kaito now used to punish traitors.

Kaito, who'd given him a place in his house, that man he'd followed faithfully knowing it would end this way. He sighed and wondered if this was his punishment from the gods. All the things he'd done for Kaito, all the people he'd screwed over for Kaito, maybe he deserved this death. Deserved this end in the middle of the woods, his body eaten by wild coyotes.

Fool.

He stopped.

Where was he going?

Be a man, pull the dagger out.

Blindly walking through the woods with no direction wasn't going to help him. Even if someone found him, the nearest hospital was miles away. A short painful death was better than a long, equally painful one.

Damn Kaito for leaving him this way.

Having to choose was cruel.

Toshiro gritted his teeth and dropped his gaze to his left hand. His fingers tightened on the smooth black handle. One good pull and the knife would be out; he took in a deep breath.

Just one tug...one tug.

His left hand shook and a whimper escaped, he let out a harsh breath and braced to pull the knife off.

****

"Jason, how can you take off like that?"

Adjusting the earpiece in his ear, Jason slowed down on the second curve of the road and tried not to snap at his ex-boyfriend.

"Does your husband know you're calling me?" Jason asked finding it hard to hide his irritation.

"You left the shop without talking to me. I got worried when I tried your door and found it locked. You changed the locks."

"Sean, what do you want? Claire can answer any inventory questions, you know."

"How can you say that to me?" Sean complained. "I'm worried about you. You're acting stranger than usual, and taking a month long break from the shop is not like you."

"It's not a break, I'll be working. And if there is a problem, Claire can always call me."

"So, what you mean is you're taking a break from me," Sean said his voice ringing with hurt.

"We're not together anymore, Sean. You're married now, worry about your husband instead of me."

"Jeez, Jason, you're my business partner and my friend. Please tell me where you're going?'

Jason sighed.

"Listen, I don't feel up to arguing with you right now. I'm driving, and—"

A man burst out of the woods onto the road and Jason swerved his grey Range Rover to miss him. Braking hard, grateful the road was deserted, Jason looked through the rear view mirror to confirm what he'd seen.

Shit!

There was a figure lying on the road behind his car.

"Jason?" Sean yelled into his ear. "Jason!!"

Removing the earpiece, Jason threw it on the dashboard and got out of the car. He left his car door open and ran to the still figure.

Had he hit him?

Oh God, he'd tried so hard to miss him.

"Hey, are you alright?"

Jason reached the prone figure.

"Mister."

Jason crouched over the man and frowned when he touched the leather clad shoulder and there was no response. The man lay on his side. Jason couldn't see his face clearly.

"Where are you hurt?" Jason asked looking around the trees, trying to see through the dark.

The Watsons had assured him their road was deserted. So where had this man come from?

Jason moved the man to his back and gasped when he saw the knife wedged deep into the unconscious man's left side.

"Oh God," he said fear creeping in.

Looking around, he hoped the culprit wasn't close.

Jason got up and ran back to his car. Taking his phone from its holder, he was glad to see Sean had ended their call. Dialing 911, he ran back to the stranger lying on the dirt road.

***

Jason sat in the emergency room at the Soldiers and Sailors Memorial hospital staring at the tiled floor. He had answered a dozen questions from the officers who showed up at the hospital. He wasn't much help since he didn't know the young man's name, or what had brought him to the woods.

The police officers asked him why he had come to the hospital, why he was waiting for news. Did he know the victim?

Jason frowned.

No, he didn't know the victim but he felt responsible for him.

Someone had tried to take that poor guy's life. Jason would stay until the young man's family came to the hospital. It was only fitting.

Glancing at his watch, his frown deepened when he saw it was almost two o'clock in the morning. Four hours in surgery and still no news. Would they stay this long if something was wrong?

What a day!

Jason sighed.

Taking his phone from his pocket, he scrolled through his calls, grimacing when he saw Sean's number: ten missed calls... _great_.

Last week, Sean, his ex-boyfriend, had married his boyfriend of two months.

Two months!

Jason still couldn't believe it.

He and Sean had dated for three years.

Three months ago, Sean had woken up one morning, decided their relationship wasn't exciting him anymore and demanded they break up.

Shocked and hurt, Jason watched Sean move out of his loft into an apartment across the street. Life had gotten considerably harder since then. Their work life deteriorated after the abrupt break-up. After all, he and Sean were business partners. They owned an eclectic store named Silverstone in Downtown Penn Yan. They sold jewelry: antique pieces, beads, leatherwork, and unique design pieces. They also sold interior décor accessories. Sean sourced unique items on his various trips across the country, while Jason designed and created jewelry.

Jason had lived in Penn Yan most of his life, and so owning a shop in the quiet town suited him. He liked the slow pace of life because it gave him time to create his own jewelry designs. He loved working with metals, molding them into stunning designs and having clients marvel at the result.

He loved the work, and yes, sometimes he paid more attention to it than his relationships.

Sean claimed Jason used his design work to shut the world out, and it had ended their relationship.

That remark stung deep.

Jason loved Sean, still cared for him even now, despite the impromptu wedding.

_Stupid Sean_. _How could he marry the baker across the street without warning?_

Two months wasn't long enough to know a person.

Jason wondered if Mark the baker knew how demanding Sean was at home. Sean was constantly seeking attention, neglecting household chores, amassing clothes in the closet until it looked like he raided the Salvation Army. But then again, maybe Mark liked that kind of thing.

Jason scowled at that thought.

He had refused to wish them well at their wedding. Yes, he knew it was petty, since he valued Sean more than he dared say. They'd grown up together, making mud pies in his mother's backyard. He couldn't throw away his friendship with Sean.

Making an effort to resolve hard feelings, Jason decided to sit the Watson house.

The Watsons were family friends, and when Rhonda Watson asked him to watch their three-acre lakefront property, he had thought it a good excuse to get away. The couple would be gone for two months on a trip to visit their kids in Hawaii.

Jason felt two months of quiet, away from the store and Sean, would cure his bitterness. At least, it would calm his anger enough for him to face Sean and Mark without wanting to spit at them.

He would use the time to heal his broken heart. The ranch style property was peaceful and tranquil, no one to bother him there. He'd put to rest his anger with Sean and find a way to get along with the new couple.

"Jason."

A soft touch on his shoulder had him looking up to find a friendly woman in her late twenties smiling at him. Her name was Keira. Jason had designed her wedding ring last year.

"I heard you found the young Asian man. They don't have a name for him yet so we're calling him John."

"Is he alright?" Jason asked standing up.

"He pulled through surgery just fine. Would you like to see him?" she asked.

Jason nodded and followed her to the Intensive Care Unit. The young man's bed was close to the windows. Machines mounted over the head of the bed monitored John's vital signs.

"He was smart and didn't pull out the dagger. That saved him, otherwise he'd have bled to death," Keira said quietly. She adjusted the blue hospital blanket over the sleeping man's chest. "Jeff took the dagger with him, said he'd be back when John woke up."

Jeff Larock was the town investigator.

"Didn't John have any identification?" Jason asked with a frown.

"None that we could find in his clothes," Keira said with a sigh, her gaze on John's face. "He's so young and handsome. Jeff thinks the owner of the dagger tried to mug him. We'll keep him for the next five days; he needs antibiotics incase of inflammation. He was very lucky you found him, Jason."

Jason looked at Keira.

"Can I sit with him for a while?"

"Sure," Keira said patting his shoulder. "It will be good for him. I'll be at the nurses' station if you need anything."

She walked off to carry on her duties and left him to watch over the stranger lying in the hospital bed. Keira was right. John was young, probably in his early twenties. His dark hair was flat against his forehead. Jason moved closer to the bed. With gentle fingers, he touched the soft strands wondering who would dare hurt such an innocent face.

His hand dropped away from the unconscious man and he removed his jacket and pulled the chair set beside the bed closer. Placing his jacket on the back, he sat down, his gaze never leaving the young man.

****

"Hey," Jason said gently combing mink black hair, "you should wake up now."

The dark hair was long, maybe reaching the shoulders, but he couldn't tell yet, not with the handsome prince lying down. He put the comb he'd brought on the bedside table and sat in the chair.

"I thought about you when I went home."

Jason studied the sleeping face.

"I wondered what your name is, I've checked out a bunch of Asian names online. I keep thinking it would be funny if it turned out you're from New York and your name is Todd, or Tim. I know everyone is calling you John, but I don't like it. It just doesn't suit you."

Jason studied the sleeping face and shook his head.

"You should wake up so I stop guessing."

Jason reached for the young man's left hand on the covers and studied his fingers. The nails were clean, although there was a broken edge on the thumb. There was also a small cut on the small finger. Clasping the still fingers gently with his left hand, Jason traced the snake tattoo coiling around the young man's left wrist and up his arm to his bicep. The black and white drawing so detailed, it fascinated him. He'd discovered it this afternoon when he arrived in time to find the nurse checking John's vital signs.

Last night, he had sat in this chair out of curiosity, to make sure that the younger man survived the night. He left at six in the morning with reassurance from Keira that John would be fine. Jason drove to the Watson house to unpack his work supplies. After two hours of hauling his equipment into a workroom in the back of the house, he called Rhonda Watson to assure her he had reached.

Tired from his sleepless night, Jason showered and dropped on his bed in the guestroom. He'd woken up at midday after having managed three hours of sleep. His dreams riddled with the mystery of the young Asian man.

Now, the fingers in his hand moved and Jason's gaze flew to John's sleeping face. He watched in fascination as John turned his head to the side, taking a deep breath before his eyes opened.

And what eyes, Jason drew in a gasp as he met light honey colored eyes. The fingers he held curled and squeezed his hand. The monitors over the bed went off and Keira came running.

"He's waking up," Jason said standing to give her space.

She stopped the beeping and checked John's vital signs.

"Hi," she said in a gentle voice, smiling at John. "Glad to see you open your eyes. Can you talk?"

Those beautiful eyes stared at Keira, and then closed. John swallowed hard before he groaned out.

"Water?"

Jason reached for the ice chips in a jug on the bedside table. Putting a few in a cup with a spoon, he gave the cup to Keira who fed John a few pieces. When she tried to give John more ice chips, John refused, so Keira handed Jason the cup.

"The doctor is on his rounds. I'll let him know you're awake."

Keira squeezed the young man's hand and hurried away to the nurses' station.

Nervous, Jason held up the cup of ice chips.

"More?"

John shook his head and tried to sit up. A wince marred his features and his left hand went to his stomach.

Jason placed the cup on the bedside table and pressed the buttons on the bed to raise John's upper body.

"You can't move yet."

"Have...to...," the younger man cleared his throat and tried to move again. "I have to leave this place."

Jason perched on the edge of the bed, taking the younger man's left hand.

"Please, relax. You just came out of surgery. Wait until the doctor comes and checks you out. Hmm...I don't know how much you remember about last night, but you need to rest."

"Who are you?" The question came in a quiet voice tinged with a slight accent.

"I'm Jason. I found you on the Knights Bridge Road last night. You were unconscious. I figure you wouldn't remember me." Jason squeezed the fingers he held gently. "But that's alright. What's your name?"

Light honey colored eyes studied him, judging his sincerity. He smiled hoping to assure the younger man.

"Toshiro," the answer came after a few minutes. "Toshiro Shindo."

Jason smiled wide.

"Toshiro," he repeated. "Nice to meet you."

****

Kind green eyes studied him, gentle hands held his and he was warm. It almost felt like a dream. Or maybe he'd really died and the blond man with the kind green eyes was an angel.

Toshiro frowned and shifted on the bed.

Dull pain swept across his stomach and he closed his eyes.

Pain. Yes, that was familiar.

He understood pain. They'd obviously given him medicine to manage the pain. All he could feel was a dull discomfort in his abdomen, but it was enough. It brought back his dark memories.

Kaito's fickle love. Kaito's betrayal. Kaito's dagger.

The wound in his stomach was his reward for all his years of loyalty to that man and the Takumi family.

"You look like you're hurting," the man holding his hand said, his voice tinged with worry. "I'll call the nurse to give you something."

His eyes flew open, his fingers tightening on the gentle clasp holding his.

"No," he said, his voice grating. He didn't want to fall asleep again. "Please, I need to think clearly. It's not safe here."

"What do you mean?" Those green eyes filled with worry.

Toshiro wondered why. Surely not for him.

"Do you know who stabbed you last night?'

Toshiro blanched at the thought of Kaito finding this kind man. He shook his head in denial. He couldn't have this man's death on his conscious. He had to leave this place.

"I figured you didn't know who they were. Don't worry. I'm sure Keira called Jeff. Jeff is the town's detective. Once you make a statement about what you remember, he'll get started finding the bastard who did this to you. You're safe, Toshiro. I promise."

Toshiro stared at this man in shock.

No one had ever cared how safe he was in his life.

No one!

"How's our patient?" the perky nurse returned followed by a tall man with graying hair, dressed in a white coat.

"His name is Toshiro," the kind man answered.

Toshiro frowned.

The kind man had said his name.

Mason....no—Jason. The kind man's name was Jason.

"Toshiro, what a handsome name," the perky nurse said. "It's a handsome name like the owner. Boy am I glad to see you awake. You're the town sensation right now. News about Jason saving a man last night has spread like wildfire."

Her words drew the picture of an excited horde of people coming to the hospital to see the man this Jason had saved, creating a circus, drawing Kaito's attention. Before he could protest, Jason squeezed his hand gently.

"Relax," Jason said as though reading his thoughts. "No one will bother you until you're healed."

The doctor moved closer to the bed.

"Jason, will you give us a moment while we check on our patient," the doctor said.

"Sure." Jason smiled at him as the nurse drew the curtains around the bed. "I'll be right back, Toshiro."

Toshiro watched the doctor check on his wound, carefully examining him for infection. He let a relieved sigh escape when the doctor nodded his head in approval. He was glad his wound was healing. It would make leaving this place easier.

"You're doing well," the doctor said removing his latex gloves. "We'll keep you for the next couple of days to make sure there's no infection. I have you on antibiotics. You'll recover fine."

"How long is a couple of days?" Toshiro asked.

The doctor studied him.

"Five days," the doctor said with a small smile.

"Can I leave in two?" Toshiro asked.

Any longer and Kaito might return to make sure he'd really died.

"That's too soon," the perky nurse said. "Is there anyone we can call for you? Family in the area?"

Toshiro shook his head.

"No one."

"Oh," the perky nurse frowned.

Toshiro guessed in her world people had huge families, and millions of friends to call on when trouble started. It was all roses and lilies in her world, no rotten eggs.

"Well, if there is no one then all the more reason to stay the five days," the doctor said as he jotted down a few notes on Toshiro's chart. "Keira here is the best nurse we have and she'll make sure you're back on your feet in no time."

Keira nodded in agreement with the doctor.

"Don't worry about anything, Toshiro," Keira said with a bright smile.

"Good," the doctor said and handed her the chart. "I'll see you tomorrow, Toshiro. Try to get some sleep."

Keira placed his chart on the holder at the foot of his bed and rolled back the curtains. She adjusted his covers and fluffed up his pillows.

"Do you really have no one to call?" she asked with a frown.

Her concerned gaze made him feel pitiful.

"It's no big deal."

"What about your parents?" she asked.

"I'm an orphan."

"Aunts or Uncles? Friends?" she continued.

_Friends,_ he scoffed thinking about the men working for Kaito. He'd never once thought those guys were his friends. He dropped his gaze to his lap and shook his head.

"No one to call," he said.

"Well," Keira touched his left hand and he looked up to find her smiling. "I think you might have one friend."

He frowned and followed her gaze to the blond man who'd walked into the room carrying a bunch of battered white roses. Jason had put them in a small juice bottle filled with water. They looked as pitiful as he felt.

"Glad to see you back, Jason," Keira said as she patted Toshiro's arm with a secret smile.

Keira left them alone and Toshiro watched Jason walk to his bedside.

Jason placed the flowers on his bedside table with a shy smile.

"I figured everyone else has flowers, you should too."

He blinked when Jason held out a cup of coffee to him with a grin.

"I sneaked this in too. I'm not sure about hospital food, but I think I'd want a good cup of coffee if I ever woke up in hospital."

Toshiro was surprised by the laugh that slipped out.

He took the cup, the scent so strong, his mouth watered. Meeting kind green eyes, he wished he could stay in this strange place.

****

Chapter Two

Two days later, Toshiro sat on the chair beside his bed, his leather jacket on his lap as he stared out the window into the cool morning. The small quaint town was surreal. He'd never lived in one place long enough to care about the people. Running organized crime left no time for home making.

He picked up his jacket and checked the pockets. Keira, the perky second-shift nurse, had told him they'd looked for his identification and found none. They wouldn't have, he thought as he opened a hidden zipper sewn into the inner seam of his jacket.

He took out a New York City license. It had his name and an address in New York City to a two-bedroom apartment he'd gotten for his cover. Anyone who checked it out would assume he was a college student.

Now for money.

He couldn't pay the hospital bill with his usual accounts. Kaito's financial manager would monitor his money for the next year or so. Any activity and his name would be on a hit list.

Toshiro reached for the clear bag they'd given him filled with his clothes. Removing his right boot from the bag, he turned it over so that he looked at the heavy sole. He pushed the heel to the side with his thumb to reveal a small flat space cut into the sole of his boot. He retrieved the prepaid credit card he'd gotten in case he got in trouble and snapped the heel of his boot back in place.

Dropping the boot to the floor, he studied the company name on the card. He was the sole shareholder of DongShin Co. He'd created the shell company to protect himself. The money in the card would get him to safety.

"Mr. Shindo?" a quiet masculine voice said and he looked up to find a man in a heavy brown sweater and green corduroy pants watching him.

Toshiro palmed the card, and forced his body to relax under the scrutiny of pale blue eyes.

"Yes," he said.

The man held up a badge.

"I'm Jeff Larock, Penn Yan PD. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?"

Toshiro shrugged and watched as the tall man perched on his hospital bed. Jeff Larock was probably in his late thirties. He was fit, definitely a man who'd seen his share of action. His eyes made Toshiro pause. Jeff had a quiet demeanor, but it was a ruse.

Jeff Larock was no pushover and he was very attentive to details.

"How is your wound?" Jeff asked.

"I'm fine," Toshiro said.

"I heard you didn't have anyone to call," Jeff said studying him intently.

"They are all in Tokyo," Toshiro said the lie coming easy. "It's better not to worry them when they can't come to see me."

"So, you're Japanese?" Jeff asked.

"Yes. I'm here on a student visa."

"Where do you go to school?" Jeff asked.

"Columbia University."

"What are you studying there?"

"Finance and Economics."

Jeff lifted an eyebrow in surprise.

"You look like an art student."

"Yeah," Toshiro said tugging the sleeves of the heavy sweater Jason had brought him yesterday. "I get that a lot."

"Why are you in Penn Yan?" Jeff asked.

"My boss has property along Lake Keuka. He asked me to check on it for him. On the way back to New York, I got carjacked on the state highway," Toshiro said.

He was certain Kaito would dump the Mercedes they'd driven last night in case someone found Toshiro's body.

"I did what the carjackers wanted, so when they drove the car into the woods I thought they'd dump me and drive off."

"So, you didn't know them?" Jeff asked.

Toshiro met his gaze and shook his head.

"No."

"What kind of car do you drive?"

"A black Mercedes," he answered. "I'll write you the plate number."

"Rich parents?" Jeff asked.

"I'm an orphan. The money is in my extended family," Toshiro said. "I've caused them enough trouble. I'd prefer to deal with this without calling them."

Jeff nodded.

"What else did the carjackers take?"

Toshiro thought about the briefcase Kaito had taken from him and shuddered.

"My wallet which was in the glove compartment and my phone, I'm lucky my driver's license was in my pocket."

"Can I see it?" Jeff asked.

Toshiro handed over his driver's license.

Jeff scribbled the driver's license number on a small notebook, before he handed it back.

"Do you remember anything about your attackers? Something to identify them?"

Toshiro looked away from Jeff.

"Not much. They were rowdy, kept calling me names. They told me I was a rich boy who'd get another car tomorrow. They stabbed me to keep me from calling out."

"That must have been hard for you," Jeff said.

Toshiro turned to find Jeff watching him with a narrowed gaze. He didn't care what Jeff believed. He planned to leave the moment the night shift started. Now that he'd survived Kaito's murder attempt, he wanted to know why he'd deserved to die in the woods.

"I thought I was dead."

Toshiro decided to throw the detective a little emotion.

"Do you know what that is like? I didn't expect to wake up in this bed the way I did. All I remember is walking for hours and when I couldn't anymore, I passed out. Then I woke up here, so forgive me if I haven't sorted it all out yet in my head."

"Relax," Jeff said with a sigh. "I'm on your side."

Jeff held out his notebook to him.

"Why don't you write your license plate number for me? We can start there."

Toshiro nodded and took the notebook. Taking the pen Jeff held out to him, he wrote out the number and handed it back. He didn't miss the fact that Jeff held the pen with his thumb and forefinger careful not to hold where he had.

Meeting Jeff's gaze, he smiled.

"Thank you, Mr. Larock. I hope you find my car soon."

"Me too," Jeff said standing up. "Okay, that's all I need for now. I'll come visit you tomorrow and see how you're doing. I'm assuming you're not leaving town just yet."

"Obviously," Toshiro said touching his left side.

Jeff gave him a nod and Toshiro watched him walk out of his hospital room.

Placing his jacket on the bed, Toshiro decided the best thing to do now was get out of this town as soon as possible.

****

"Have you found out who did this to Toshiro?" Jason asked Jeff when he met him leaving Toshiro's room.

"There's not much to go on," Jeff said stopping at the door to watch Toshiro staring out the window. "He's keeping something from me. I'm not sure he wants us to find out what happened out there."

"Why would you say that?"

"When I asked him if he knew his attackers he lied to me," Jeff said. "He's also a student at Columbia. The question is what he's doing four hours away from the big city in our sleepy little town."

"Someone tried to murder him," Jason pointed out in irritation not liking Jeff's thought process.

"Well, that is true too." Jeff shrugged and gave him a slight smile. "Don't listen to me, I'm thinking out loud. I'll leave you now. I have a car to find."

Jason watched Jeff walk away with quick strides. A soft curse brought back his attention to Toshiro who was standing, his left hand pressed into his stomach.

"Toshiro, wait," he said rushing into Toshiro's room. "You should call for help when you want to move. Jeez, you've barely started healing."

Those honeyed eyes scowled at him and set his heart on a wild dance. His heart had taken to Toshiro in the past two days, one glance from the younger man tugged at every empathic cell he had in his body.

He'd barely spent time at the Watson house other than to shower and get a change of clothes. He hadn't liked the thought of leaving Toshiro alone in hospital with no one to visit or worry about him. Keira had told him that there was no family coming to help Toshiro.

Jason pulled the covers back and helped Toshiro slide into the hospital bed. He was glad to see Toshiro was wearing the red pajama pants he'd brought and his sweater over the hospital gown. Pulling the blankets over Toshiro, he placed the bag he'd brought on the chair.

"How are you doing today?" Jason asked happy to see he'd been right about Toshiro's hair.

It was long to his shoulders. Soft and straight, it made him look vulnerable although there was something tough about the expression on Toshiro's face.

"Better," Toshiro answered his fingers playing with his blankets. "You didn't have to come in, you know. I'm sure you have a busy life out there."

Jason smiled Toshiro had told him the same thing yesterday.

"I don't mind coming in. Keira says you wanted to check out of the hospital today. Why?"

"I'm tired of the hospital. I can heal at home."

Jason felt a stab of disappointment flash through his stomach.

"Where is home?"

"Manhattan."

"Is there anyone at home to look after you?" Jason asked. "You're going to need help."

"I'll be fine," Toshiro said dismissively. "This is not the first time I've been hurt."

"No way," Jason said sitting on the bed. "I won't send you away to fend for yourself."

Toshiro frowned.

"You're a strange man."

"Why am I strange?" Jason asked, staring at Toshiro unable to imagine him alone and hurting.

He had no idea why he cared so much, but the thought of Toshiro suffering alone didn't settle well with him.

"You have to stay," Jason insisted.

"I don't know anyone in this town." Toshiro lay back on his pillows. "There's no reason to stay. And you are strange because most people stay away from strangers found on the road with daggers in their stomach."

"Is that what it's been like for you?" Jason asked. "People didn't help you when they found you in trouble?"

Toshiro narrowed his gaze.

"I think the question I should ask is what it has been like for you that you want to help someone like me."

"I thought I hit you." Jason confessed with a sigh. "You came out of the woods stumbling and I swerved but when I looked in the rear mirror, you were on the ground. I thought I hit you."

"Well, you didn't. You're absolved of any blame," Toshiro said. "I owe you a debt of life. I'll repay it when I can."

"Repay it now by staying here," Jason bargained. "If you go running off to New York City, you might get into more trouble. Why don't you stay?"

Toshiro shook his head. "I can't stay."

"But I want you to," Jason said reaching to lift Toshiro's chin when he looked away. "I—

Toshiro met his gaze with a closed expression.

"Jason, stop. I'm not good. I'm not good for you or this place. The best thing I can do is disappear."

Jason wished Toshiro would stop wanting to run away. The more Toshiro protested, the more he wanted to figure him out.

"Enough about this," Jason said getting off the bed.

He opened the bag he'd brought and took out newspapers. He handed them to Toshiro.

"Yesterday, you asked if you could get newspapers. I stopped by the supermarket and got the ones you'd missed and the one for today. I thought you might like to read them."

Toshiro took them with a grateful smile.

"Thanks."

Jason nodded and took a drawing pad from his bag. He sat down on the chair and put the bag on the heater. He sat back watching Toshiro sit cross-legged on the bed and start reading the newspapers as if he was attacking homework. He had three more days to convince Toshiro to stay.

_Three more days to get Toshiro to stay with him for a few days_ , he thought with a smile.

***

Kaito had sent Toshiro to Columbia University to study finance when he turned eighteen. Toshiro had spent four years there accumulating knowledge and contacts in the business world that Kaito would later exploit.

At the time, he hadn't thought much of it. He'd worked with diligence, following orders, trusting in Kaito, until last year when he'd realized Kaito's endgame.

Toshiro read business news, searching, hoping not to find, and then there it was.

Caribea Corporation's C.E.O. admitted into a private hospital in Newark. Mr. Brett Carrey in critical condition.

The Caribea Corporation was a private company owned by the Carrey family. Toshiro had met them two years ago in a meeting engineered by Kaito in Tokyo. Caribea owned prime real estate in New York City and other major cities around the world as well as various casinos and resorts.

Thanks to Toshiro, the Takumi family now owned forty-nine percent of Caribea Corporation.

Walden Carrey, Brett's cousin, had signed over his ten percent share the night Kaito stabbed him. Those documents had been in the briefcase Kaito took from him that night. With Brett Carrey in the hospital, Toshiro had no doubt that Kaito would gain controlling shares, probably by manipulating Brett's wife.

The Takumi Family would officially own a legitimate business in New York City. It would be a stepping-stone to buy into other legitimate companies.

So, if the deal was that easy, why had Kaito cut him down?

Unless—

Toshiro folded the newspaper fear creeping in.

_Unless he was blood_ , he thought.

Toshiro shook his head.

That was unlikely. He'd watched his mother die. Kaito's father had killed her. Blow by blow, Toshiro had watched it all that day, his first lesson in the hands of the Takumi family. It was a perfect lesson that there was no mercy in this world, not for the weak, or the strong, no mercy at all.

Toshiro had never dared find his father. Considering his mother's reputation, he'd figured his father wouldn't want to meet him.

However, if Kaito had thought him a traitor, he'd have taken him into that torturous room he used for murder. Kaito would have beat Toshiro to death with the whole clan looking on, not stabbed him in the woods, in a foreign country, with a personal blade.

Glancing at the blond man seated by the window, he narrowed his gaze.

He didn't know men like Jason. In his world, suspicion was healthy, kindness a prerequisite to a hateful action. Jason's offer to stay was the purest kindest gesture he'd ever received.

However, he couldn't take it.

Placing the newspapers on the bedside table, he shifted on the bed so that he faced Jason.

"You're staring," Jason said, his attention on the drawing pad on his lap.

The strokes of Jason's pencil on paper were fluid, elegant. Jason looked up and met his gaze.

"Did you change your mind about staying?"

Toshiro smiled.

"I have a question."

"Shoot."

"What would I do here if I stayed?" Toshiro asked.

Jason studied him for a minute before he answered.

"Well, first, I'd get you to stay with me. I'm watching a family friend's house for the next month or so. It's a quiet place by the lake, no one to bother you. I'd spoil you silly—,"

"Spoil me?" Toshiro asked with a laugh. "How do you know I'm not spoiled already?"

"Have you had breakfast in bed lately?"

Toshiro made a show of thinking. The truth was he'd never gotten such courtesies in his life. Not even from Kaito whose bed he'd slept in for the last three years. Their relationship was strictly sexual, no emotional entanglements.

He shrugged at Jason.

"Not really."

"Well, then I can get you pancakes for breakfast with maple syrup. Tastiest thing you ever ate," Joshua grinned. "We can go swimming in the lake, or fishing."

"I don't know how to fish," Toshiro lied, loving Jason's enthusiasm.

There was such sincerity in Jason's words; he could almost imagine those scenes.

"I can teach you," Jason said, placing his drawing pad on the heater beside his bag. "When I was a kid, my parents used to take us camping in the woods by the lake. We'd compete to see who got the most fish."

"Did you win?" Toshiro asked picturing a ten-year-old version of Jason.

He imagined the blond handsome man had enjoyed the all-American life: two parents, nice house, maybe a dog.

"Sometimes, but I suspect my dad used to add fish in my bucket so that I won."

"Are you an only child?" Toshiro asked.

"Yep. It's just my mum and me now. My dad died when I was twelve." Jason shrugged. "We never went fishing after that."

Toshiro knew death, and the emptiness it brought. Jason was lucky for his happy memories. There were those who got only bad memories, and then death.

"What do you do for a living?" he asked to change the subject.

Toshiro didn't want to lie to Jason about his own parents.

Jason unclasped a chain from his left wrist and held it out to him. Toshiro took the delicate silver chain.

"I make jewelry," Jason said. "I like molding metals into different designs."

Toshiro studied the chain, the silver metal thin and woven into a delicate braid that flowed with fluid motion. It was intricate work. Jason had talented hands.

"Can I keep it?" he asked studying the simple hook and eye clasp.

"Sure," Jason said with a nod. "What about you? What do you do?"

Toshiro wore the chain and smiled when it fit his wrist.

"I'm an MBA student at Columbia," he answered. The information was harmless. "I do odd jobs for money; you know how it is when you're a student."

"Jobs like what?" Jason persisted.

Toshiro shrugged. "Like sorting out boring financial problems for people and their businesses."

He frowned as he realized how good he'd gotten at sorting out Kaito's problems. So good, he'd neglected to look out for himself.

He met Jason's watchful gaze and smiled.

"My jobs are not as exciting as yours," he said touching the chain on his wrist. "This is very handsome."

Jason chuckled.

"I can make you one if you like. That one wasn't as good when I made it. It has a few flaws."

"Then I'll keep it," Toshiro said. "My flaws out weigh my good side too. Birds of a feather and all that."

"What flaws?" Jason asked softly. "You're...perfect."

Toshiro laughed.

"Well, that's new. Are you coming on to me?"

Jason blushed.

"Are you offended?"

"Flattered," Toshiro answered shaking his head. "I'm not perfect, Jason."

Jason shifted in his seat, his blush disappearing as he studied Toshiro.

"Do you notice you do that?"

"What?"

"Put yourself down," Jason said. "You talk as though you don't matter. Earlier you said you're not good, as though you deserved what happened to you, but I beg to differ. As far as I'm concerned, you're an innocent victim, Toshiro: a very handsome innocent victim."

Toshiro looked away from Jason's keen gaze.

"I don't know what to say to you. I'm not handsome. I think you're wearing blinders in your eyes. I hate scissors so that's how my hair gets this long, and I have so many scars on my body, my skin looks like patchwork."

Jason got up from his chair and came to sit next to him on the bed. Toshiro closed his eyes when Jason touched his hair.

"I love your long hair," Jason said, letting the soft strands sift through his fingers. "The tattoo on your left arm fascinates me. I found myself drawing it last night, thinking of a way to make you a chain that matched it. Your eyes set my heart dancing."

"Stop." Toshiro lifted his head to meet Jason's gaze. "Obviously your brain works different. You're a hopeless romantic."

Jason laughed.

"My ex-boyfriend would disagree with you."

Toshiro reached for Jason's wandering hand and held it on his lap.

"Why?"

Jason shrugged. "I guess I wasn't what he was looking for."

Toshiro scowled.

"He must be blind then."

Jason laughed.

"Now you're flattering me."

Toshiro stared at Jason's smile and warmth spread through him. He liked Jason's smile.

A knock came on the door and they both looked to find Keira walking in.

"Hi guys," she said, holding a thermometer and a blood pressure machine. "I see a smile that makes me happy. How's it going?"

"Good," Jason said. "I'm trying to get Toshiro to stay at my place until he heals."

"That's a great idea," Keira said as she took Toshiro's temperature.

"See, Toshiro, just give in," Jason urged him.

Looking into Jason's green eyes, Toshiro was tempted to agree. Really tempted, but his life was a mess. He had no right to stay here. He listened to Keira and Jason banter about local happenings. They talked about people they'd grown up with; their lives so neatly weaved into the town. They included him in their conversation as though he belonged.

They passed the afternoon that way. Keira was lenient with Jason, letting him stay even when visiting hours ended. That Tuesday afternoon turned into the best hours of his life, just sitting with Jason talking and laughing without a care.

***

Toshiro walked out of the Soldiers and Sailors Memorial Hospital at three in the morning, his right arm across his stomach. Each step agonizing as he walked through the parking lot as though he'd left a car there. No one paid him any mind. He walked around a green Toyota Camry, tried the driver's door and wasn't surprised to find it unlocked.

_Small towns,_ he thought as he slid into the driver's seat with a quiet groan.

Closing the door, he opened the glove compartment, and when he didn't find the keys there, he turned down the visor. A bundle of keys fell on his lap and he smiled.

Starting the car, he gave the hospital one last glance before he drove out of the parking lot, heading to New York City.

As he drove out of Penn Yan, his one regret was that he'd never see Jason and his kind green eyes again.

***

"What do you mean he's gone?" Jason demanded on Wednesday morning. He stood in Toshiro's hospital room staring at the empty bed in shock. "Did he—, I mean—,"

"Oh goodness, no," the nurse in charge said. "He walked out of here. I came in for my four o'clock rounds and found the bed empty. At first, I thought he'd gone for a walk or something, but we've checked the whole building. He's gone. Jeff is out there searching."

"Left," Jason said quietly.

He walked to the stripped bed and sat on the edge. He held two cups of coffee on a tray, together with a bag of fresh bagels from his favorite bakery. Staring at the breakfast he'd thought to share with Toshiro, he tried to fight off disappointment.

"I'm sure he's alright," the nurse said. "Listen, I'll give you a few minutes alone, Jason."

When he just stared at her, she gave him a small uncertain smile before she left the room, her orthopedic shoes squeaking on the tiles.

_Damn, why did things work out this way for him_?

Jason got up from the bed and shook his head. Walking around the bed to the chair by the window, he placed the coffee tray and bagels on the heater with a sigh. He frowned when he noticed a butterfly origami made out of newspaper on the windowsill. He picked it up and stared at it for a moment.

Turning it over, he smiled when he found a paper wedged in the butterfly. Looking around the room, he unfolded the small paper and found Toshiro had written him a note.

'You're probably disappointed with me right now. I'm sorry for leaving without saying goodbye. Thank you for saving me, Jason. If the fates allow it, I'll repay this debt one day. T.'

Just like that, Toshiro was gone, as fast as he'd entered his life.

Jason prayed the fates were kind. He wanted a chance to see Toshiro again in this lifetime.

****

Chapter Three

Standing behind heavy curtains, Toshiro watched Kaito send his bodyguards away and close the bedroom door. Toshiro waited for the outer door to close, aware that those two burly men who followed Kaito everywhere waited in the hallway. Kaito removed his tie, dropping it on an armchair, his grey suit jacket followed.

Toshiro moved from his hiding place when Kaito turned to the bed, ready to remove his shirt.

"Leave your clothes on," he said.

Kaito's shoulders stiffened and he turned to look at Toshiro.

"You're alive."

"Surprised?" Toshiro asked, closing the distance between them. He met Kaito's dark gaze. When he read no remorse there, he asked, "Why?"

"You shouldn't have come back," Kaito said.

Toshiro pressed the silencer on Kaito's forehead and asked again, "Why?"

"You can't kill me," Kaito said with a small smile. "I know you, Toshiro. You pretend to have a hard heart, but I know how soft you are. You can't stand violence or cruelty. Murder certainly doesn't become you."

"I changed when you stabbed me. Now answer my question or I'll shoot you, and no one will know who did it."

"Toshiro, you can't change overnight. I know you," Kaito said in a cajoling tone.

"If you don't tell me what I want to know, I'm going to kill you, Kaito. You trained me well."

Kaito sighed and sat on the bed.

"What do you want to know?"

Toshiro glared at Kaito.

Kaito chuckled, the sound mocking.

"What happened to my dagger?"

"The police in that small town have it."

"That was my favorite dagger, you know. I'm going to miss it."

When Toshiro didn't respond, Kaito studied him.

"You wear your anger well, little brother. How long did it take you to find me?"

"Three weeks," Toshiro answered lowering his gun.

He had gone to his old apartment in Manhattan to find it trashed. No doubt, Kaito's men had wanted to make it seem as though he'd been killed there. It had taken him three days to track Kaito in Newark.

Getting this close to Kaito... that had taken longer...he'd had to wait for Kaito to return to the city.

Toshiro adjusted the grip on his gun.

"I thought you might return to Tokyo, but then there was an article about Mr. Carrey. Sakura worked overtime on this one, didn't she? How quickly did she get Carrey in hospital?"

"It was a record two weeks," Kaito said with a pleased smile. "She induced a heart attack. Mr. Carrey was practically at death's door when you and I got Warren to sign over his shares."

"Of course," Toshiro said. "The wife? Did she sign over the family shares?"

Kaito nodded.

"Yes, two days ago. Sakura left for Tokyo this morning. Did you know she loved you? She saved Mr. Carrey in your honor. She was devastated when I told her you were dead. To get back at me, she defied my orders and gave Mr. Carrey the antidote."

"That's shocking," Toshiro said in surprise. "I never realized she had a heart under all that ice. Tell her to cut it out if she's to survive with you."

"Toshiro," Kaito chided. "Don't be so mean. Sakura is a nice girl. Now stop this madness. You're not going to kill me. You can't, we're family. What's a little stabbing between us? It was harmless."

"You left me for dead. The least you could have done was finish the job instead of leave me to stumble alone in the forest."

"The choice to live or die was yours. You chose to live, good for you, but it's stupid you decided to return to me and squander your precious life." Kaito's gaze hardened. "There's nothing for you here."

Toshiro raised his gun again and pointed it at Kaito's head, his gaze hardening too.

"I want to know why you killed me."

"You're so stubborn, Toshiro."

When Toshiro didn't budge, Kaito sighed.

"Fine, I needed you out of the way."

"Why?"

"I'm trying to make the Takumi businesses legitimate. Thanks to you, that is now a reality. Your financial advice has helped us but our rivals have noticed."

"Rivals?" Toshiro scoffed. "You mean Jun Natake. When are you going to stop fighting that man? If your men left his alone, there wouldn't be problems."

Kaito glared at him.

Jun Natake was a wealthy neighbor Kaito hated.

"You sound like father. Do you think remaining passive shows strength? I can't allow Natake to do what he wants. He'd destroy what we've worked for if he got the chance. He has to be put in his place."

Toshiro scowled.

"So you stabbed me because Natake has taken notice of me?"

"I stabbed you to keep you out of his reach," Kaito replied. "You're so ignorant, Toshiro. Have you never wondered why you've lived the kind of life you have?"

Toshiro felt his blood run cold.

"So, you have thought about it?" Kaito's gaze narrowed, studying him. "Of course you have. That's why you are my favorite. You do so much thinking. What will you do if I refuse to tell you?"

Toshiro put his finger on the trigger, and ground the silencer on Kaito's forehead. Kaito raised his hands in surrender.

"Relax, I'll tell you the truth," Kaito said. "Toshiro, you're a Natake. My mother's men stole you from Jun Natake when you were two years old. She came up with the brilliant plan of raising you in the Takumi clan. You see, the Natakes' have a knack for money that we don't have. My mother figured if you grew up thinking you were part of us, some of that luck would rub off. She stole you behind my father's back. Her men took you from your parents. She kept you at the bar we run in town so that my father wouldn't know what she'd done. It turned out my mother was right. You've worked hard to make us richer, while your father searched for you with growing desperation."

Toshiro stepped back.

"All those raids into the compound in Yokohama—"

"Your father trying to find you," Kaito answered coldly. "Jun Natake focused all his attention on finding you, so much so that that he neglected his businesses and your mother has taken control. Everyone knows he spends time searching for you. That's why we decided to bring you to New York to study. It kept you out of his reach."

"My mother?" Toshiro asked in shock. How could he be Natake's child? "Your father killed my mother in front of me. I watched it."

"That woman was a whore who owed my father money. She took care of you when you were a baby because you took a liking to her. My mother let her keep you, but that woman loved her highs too much, and she got greedy. She had nothing to do with you, sweet Toshiro. It was endearing how you loved her as if she were your mother. I thought it was a big laugh watching you cry your heart out for her."

Toshiro felt a tight fist clench his heart at the realization that Kaito's family had robbed him terribly. Anger brewed deep inside him, he wished he had the guts to shoot Kaito in cold blood, but he couldn't.

Kaito didn't deserve a simple death.

"You stabbed me to make sure my father would never find me," he said forcing his brain to think. "Jun Natake knows who I am."

"Someone I have yet to find gave him your picture. I took matters into my own hands and put an end to you." Kaito crossed his arms against his chest and shrugged. "It's nothing personal, Toshiro, just good business."

"Good business," Toshiro repeated with a scoff, his head felt like it might explode with rage. He brought his hands up at a loss. "My whole life is a lie for the sake of your business!"

"Do you see why I said you should never have come to find me?"

Kaito stood up then, his movement abrupt, meant to unsettle him. Toshiro took a quick step back and ducked Kaito's punch. He'd learned to escape Kaito's punches through the years.

His abdomen was still sore, so he shot Kaito's thigh, and watched with satisfaction as Kaito fell to the carpet. Kaito's painful shout attracted his bodyguards' attention. Looking around the bedroom, Toshiro located the briefcase Kaito carried around and ran to the dresser across the room to get it.

"You won't escape," Kaito warned as Toshiro raced back to the window where he'd hidden earlier. "The moment you land in Japan, you're dead, Toshiro."

Kaito's men burst through the doors.

Toshiro pushed the sliding doors open, got out on to the balcony and grabbed the rope he'd used to rappel down to Kaito's suite from the roof.

Going down was faster, he thought, as he threw himself over the balcony.

He wasn't fast enough.

A bullet hit his right arm as his left hand gripped the rope. His gloves protected him from rope burn as he slipped down the rope, the ground coming fast. He tightened his hold on the rope, slowing his progress until he was standing on the pavement. There weren't many people to see him land at three in the morning.

If they did, they didn't care.

His right arm burned, Toshiro hoped the bullet hadn't hit a major artery. Hugging the briefcase against his chest with his left hand, he ran to the motorcycle he'd parked a block away. Kaito's men would be after him for vengeance.

****

His choices limited, Toshiro rode his motorcycle to a townhouse in Greenwich he'd staked out a year ago. Parking his motorcycle two blocks away, he walked the rest of the way to the house, breaking in through the kitchen door. He placed the briefcase he carried on the small kitchen table.

Toshiro removed his leather jacket and placed it on the table too. He raised his hands, folding them behind his head and turned toward the door.

He didn't wait long.

"Who are you?" a gruff voice demanded from the hallway entrance.

"Toshiro Shindo," he said.

The lights came on.

"Keep them off if you want to keep breathing. I'm not here for a social visit."

"Why are you here?" FBI Agent Michael Baron asked as he turned off the kitchen lights and turned on the ones in the hallway.

"Relax, if I wanted to kill you, I'd not have let you hear me enter your house, Agent Baron. Take the briefcase on the kitchen table."

Toshiro heard Agent Baron pick up the leather briefcase.

"I'm going to drop my arms now," Toshiro warned.

His right arm was starting to hurt.

"Go ahead," Agent Baron said behind him. "You're bleeding."

Toshiro dropped his right arm with a wince. He gripped his right arm with his left and walked to the sink.

"Do you have a first aid kit?'

"In that cupboard under the kitchen sink," Agent Baron said. "Shouldn't we head to the emergency room?"

"The people who shot me have a long reach," Toshiro said as he retrieved the first aid box.

Running cold water in the sink, he gritted his teeth as he inspected his arm. The bullet had gone through; thankfully, no damaged major artery.

He moved to grab a clean dishtowel on a rack, and the agent hissed.

"Stop, I'll get you towels. Don't move."

Toshiro bit back a chuckle.

The Agent was probably hoping he'd leave, but where was he going to go?

Agent Baron returned with a bunch of towels. He grabbed a kitchen chair and brought it close to the sink.

"Sit, I'll take care of it."

Toshiro sat and watched the agent do his best to stop the bleeding with only the light from the hallway. He'd liked Agent Baron at first sight. The man had integrity; he followed his investigations with persistence. Baron had managed to solve ninety-percent of his caseload. The ten percent of his unsolved cases tied into the Takumi Family.

The good Agent had tried his level best to get evidence that would put a crack in the Takumi Family in New York. Baron had gotten close a year ago, when he'd stumbled on Toshiro's apartment in Manhattan. Following a lead on one of the shell companies Toshiro had created to protect the family's illegal money. They'd played a game of cat and mouse for three months. Agent Baron had been sure Toshiro was involved in Takumi's illegal business. Kaito's men had worked hard to draw suspicion from Toshiro, and eventually Agent Baron had had no choice but to back off.

"Why are you here, Mr. Shindo?" Agent Baron asked as he cleaned Toshiro's wound. "Shit, you're going to need stitches."

"I'm sure you can find a needle and thread," Toshiro said gritting his teeth against the pain. "Do the best you can."

"I'm not a nurse." Agent Baron complained as he got up and left the kitchen. He returned a few minutes later with a black thread and a needle. "Are you going to tell me who shot you?"

"Kaito Takumi's men," Toshiro answered, watching the older man douse the needle in whiskey he'd gotten from a shelf above the sink.

Agent Baron gave him an accusing look and brought the bottle to him.

"Does that mean you're _not_ an MBA student at Columbia?"

Toshiro took the bottle of whiskey from Agent Baron and drank a healthy gulp. He closed his eyes, welcoming the burning liquid down his throat. He took another gulp when he saw the needle the Agent held. Anticipating pain, he took another drink before he handed the bottle back to the Agent.

Toshiro bit back a painful cry when Agent Baron poured whiskey on his arm. Embracing the pain, he gripped the sink counter tight as the Agent got started making neat stitches on his arm.

"Talk to me," Agent Baron urged.

Toshiro sighed and forced his mind away from the numbness creeping on his arm.

" _I am_ a student at Columbia. I'm graduating next year, but, I also work for Kaito Takumi." He shook his head. "Not worked...I'm more of a pawn, one who didn't know his real value until tonight."

"What do you mean?"

"Your case, the one with the dead Caribea executive," Toshiro said. "I have the evidence you need to prove Kaito Takumi killed that man. As well as the dry cleaner you found shot in a club bathroom in Brooklyn. He laundered money for Takumi. I have evidence to help you solve a few more cases on your list."

Agent Baron finished sewing him up, applied a stinging salve on the wound before he started wrapping Toshiro's arm with a bandage. His motions spoke of experience. Toshiro suspected the good agent had treated a few gunshot wounds in his time.

When the dressing was finished, Agent Baron held out the bottle of whiskey and Toshiro refused.

"Coffee, Agent Baron." Toshiro stood and flexed his arm slowly; the pain cleared his head as nothing else could. "This has been one long night."

"What did you do for Takumi?" Agent Baron asked as he filled the coffee pot with water.

"I managed Takumi's finances up until three weeks ago."

Agent Baron's eyes widened in surprise, "What happened three weeks ago?"

Toshiro dragged his chair to the kitchen table and sat down.

"Kaito retired me. He stuck his favorite dagger into my gut, and left me in the woods near Lake Keuka to die. Agent Baron, if I talk to you, we're both going on a hit list. I'm just warning you that we might not get out of this alive."

Agent Baron started the coffee maker. He opened a kitchen drawer and removed a tape recorder. Toshiro watched him take a seat across him and place the recorder on the table.

"I'm listening," Agent Baron said, his voice full of confidence.

Toshiro sighed and started his story from the day he'd watched Kaito Takumi's father kill a woman he'd loved as his mother.

***

Jason carried a box of precious jewels into the workroom set in the back of the Watson Ranch-style house. He placed his precious cargo on a neat worktable set in the middle of the room and opened the box. Excited at the prospect of making new designs with the precious stones he'd ordered a week ago, he got the different plastic containers he used for storage.

Pulling up a seat, Jason got out ruby red crystals, studying them for flaws before he stowed them in a plastic container of their own. He reached his hand into the box for another bag and frowned when he got light brown crystals.

The crystals weren't as light as he'd have liked. They didn't match Toshiro's eyes.

Toshiro.

Jason thought about Toshiro everyday these last three weeks. He wondered if Toshiro had healed, if Toshiro found his car. Was Toshiro eating well and taking care of himself?

Shaking his head, he pushed thoughts of Toshiro away and concentrated on his work. Claire, his shop assistant, was ecstatic over his new designs. Even Sean had complimented him for the designs he'd created in the past three weeks.

Work was going well, as for healing his heart... that was a work in progress.

At least he was no longer angry with Sean and Mark. He'd seen them at the shop several times. Their connection close, Mark seemed to know what Sean needed before Sean knew. They understood each other, something that had never been there with him and Sean. Now that he thought about it, he'd never known what Sean liked to eat, or that Sean liked to garden.

Obviously, he and Sean weren't right for each other. Letting a sigh escape, Jason wondered if he and Toshiro would have been right for each other.

That afternoon, Jason drove into town to get groceries. He parked outside Silverstone, dropping by to greet Claire. She was busy with customers, so he looked around the shop instead. Happy that all was well, he left deciding to walk to the supermarket.

It was windy. He zipped up his windbreaker thinking it was probably going to rain later. Crossing the street, he wondered if he shouldn't stop by the police station and talk to Jeff. Maybe the detective had discovered something about Toshiro.

"Jason."

He turned back to see Sean running after him. He stopped and waited.

In a green light jacket and fitted jeans, Sean looked like he should work at Abercrombie & Fitch as a model. He'd recently dyed his hair blonde. Jason missed Sean's dark hair.

"You left the shop so quickly," Sean complained as he reached him. "Where are you going?"

"Supermarket, I'm running low on groceries," Jason said as they continued down the street.

"How are you?" Sean asked.

"Fine," Jason said with a shrug.

When he turned to look at Sean, he smiled when he saw the frown on Sean's forehead.

"I'm okay, Sean."

"Have you forgiven me yet?" Sean asked his tone forlorn.

"Forgiven you for what?"

"Leaving," Sean said his hands in his pockets. "Isn't that why you wanted to escape the loft for a while?"

"You were a small part," Jason said.

Sean gave him a skeptical look and he shrugged.

"Okay, maybe a big part, but don't worry, Sean. There's nothing to forgive between us. You did what you needed to for happiness."

Sean nodded and they walked in silence for a while. When they got to the supermarket, he followed Sean into the busy building.

"So, did they find the guy you rescued in the woods?" Sean asked watching him get a cart.

"No."

Jason walked along the detergent aisle and frowned when he a million brand names confronted him. Sean picked out a bottle of All detergent, saving him, and placed it in the cart.

"I was going to stop by the station. Jeff might have found out something."

"I heard that poor guy was carjacked, and the dagger they used was one of those Japanese ones they use for suicide."

Jason chuckled.

"You've been watching ninja movies again."

They turned onto the dairy products aisle and Sean stopped to get him three bottles of two percent milk. They continued down the aisle with Sean speculating on Toshiro's identity, while Jason watched him fill the cart with foods Jason preferred. He suddenly felt guilty because he couldn't remember what Sean liked.

"Maybe he's in the mob," Sean said when they got to the cereal aisle. "You know the Japanese one, what do they call it?"

" _Yakuza_?" Jason laughed. "Jeez, Sean. You and Mark need to stop watching Asian movies."

"What? Don't you think it's strange for him to have disappeared? I mean if he were just a victim, he would have stayed, allowed Jeff to find his car. Instead, he ran away in the night."

Jason found it odd too, but he'd spent time in Toshiro's company. He remembered Toshiro's laugh, and his shy smile. None of it reminded him of a gangster.

"Don't say that, he probably had an appointment he had to keep."

"Are you sweet on him?"

"What?" Jason scowled at Sean and shook his head. "Why would you say that?"

"I'm just asking," Sean said getting him bran flakes. "Keira told me you visited him everyday, and even brought him clothes."

Jason shrugged as they headed to the cashier.

"The guy was in trouble, I helped him out. I'd do the same for you."

Sean laughed.

"It's okay to say you liked him, Jason."

"You and Keira spend way too much time discussing whom I like," he complained as the cashier quickly tallied his groceries.

He got his debit card and handed it to the young lady chewing gum. She winked at him and swiped his card. His groceries turned into three brown bags. Sean took one while he carried two. They left the supermarket headed to his car.

"Thanks for shopping with me," he said.

"It's no trouble," Sean said as they crossed the street. "Jason, I know it's been weird between us. I don't want to lose your friendship. You're family to me."

They reached his grey Range Rover and he unlocked the trunk to stow away his groceries. He took Sean's bag and arranged it beside the others.

Closing the door, he patted Sean's shoulder.

"You're family to me too. Don't worry, Sean. We're good."

Sean hugged him tight.

Jason patted Sean's back with a smile.

"Don't get lost in the woods too long," Sean said as he stepped back. "And call me if you get in trouble."

Jason nodded and watched Sean hurry to their shop with a lighter heart. Why he couldn't have done that a month ago, he had no idea.

"Your ex-boyfriend is handsome."

Jason turned around in shock at the sound of that accented voice. A smile tugged his lips when he saw Toshiro leaning on his car. Dressed all in black, his hair held back in a tight ponytail, Jason felt relieved to see him so obviously healthy.

_Gods, Toshiro looked good_ , Jason had to stop himself from pulling Toshiro into his arms.

"Hi," Toshiro said with a slight smile. "You were so talkative in the supermarket. What's happened?"

He blinked.

"You were in the supermarket?"

Toshiro shrugged.

"I wanted to see if you and Sean were back together. I'd have walked away if you were."

"We're not," Jason felt compelled to reiterate.

"You left," Jason said his tone accusing.

"I'm back." Toshiro looked around the street, his gaze wary. "Do you mind if we get going?"

"Are you coming with me?" Jason asked.

Toshiro straightened and faced him.

"Only if the offer you made me when I was in the hospital is still open."

Jason studied Toshiro's pale face and nodded.

"It's open."

Toshiro smiled and walked around the car to the passenger side. Jason unlocked the doors and slid into the driver's side. He watched Toshiro slide in to the car, a duffel bag on his lap. Starting the car, he pulled out of the parking spot and headed north.

They didn't speak until he turned onto Knights Bridge Road. Slowing down, Jason turned to Toshiro.

"Will this bother you? This is where I found you."

Toshiro stared into the woods.

"I was lucky you were driving by."

Jason frowned because Toshiro sounded disappointed.

"Where did you go? Why did you leave that night?" he asked wanting to know.

Toshiro shifted in his seat so that he faced Jason.

"Can't you let it go?"

"Are you in trouble?"

Toshiro sighed.

"Nothing I can't handle."

"Why did you come back?"

"I missed you," Toshiro answered.

Jason smiled happy for that answer and turned on to the quiet gravel road that led to the Watson property.

"Then you shouldn't have left."

"I had to sort something out," Toshiro said watching the trees lining the long driveway. "Nice place."

Jason nodded as he drove up to the front of the house and parked the car near the steps leading to the front door. He turned off the engine and they both sat in the car staring at the neat lawn and the trees beyond.

"This place is quiet. I hope you don't mind that."

"It's perfect. How long are you watching it?" Toshiro asked.

"The next seven weeks," Jason said, removing his keys from the ignition. "Mrs. Watson called me yesterday. She and her husband have extended their stay in Hawaii. She wasn't ready to say goodbye to her daughter."

"She sounds like a good mother."

"She is," Jason agreed as he opened his door and got out of the car.

Toshiro helped him carry the groceries into the house. Jason led the way through the elegant living room, to the dining room, which flowed into the kitchen.

***

Toshiro fell in love with the house immediately. The great room had hardwood floors and three sliding doors that let in light, bringing in the outdoors. The living area had a cozy fireplace, the eclectic collection of furniture inviting. It felt warm, and looked as he'd imagined a family home would look.

Jason led him into a large country kitchen with ample cupboards and countertop spaces.

They placed the groceries on a breakfast bar. Toshiro tugged one of the wicker chairs set around the bar and dumped his duffel bag and leather jacket on it.

For the next few minutes, Toshiro helped Jason put away the groceries, following direction, marveling over the simple domestic exercise. He'd spent the last four days and nights in a state of worry. The quiet existence Jason lived seemed a dream.

"Do you want coffee?" Jason asked washing his hands at the sink.

"Sure."

Toshiro sat next to his bag with a soft sigh. His right arm throbbed, and his abdomen was sore. He'd barely slept these past three weeks.

"You look tired," Jason said.

He glanced up to find Jason leaning on the counter next to the coffeemaker studying him.

"How is your stomach? Is your wound healing?"

Toshiro sat back in the chair, and pulled up the black t-shirt he wore. The bandage he'd changed in the morning was still in place. He held his palm over it for a second.

"It's sore, but healing."

Jason nodded and folded his arms against his chest.

"So why are you back?"

"I told you. I missed you," Toshiro said tugging his t-shirt back in place.

"Where did you go?"

"Manhattan."

Toshiro leaned his elbows on the table.

"Why?"

One glance at Jason told him the older man wasn't going to let him stay without an explanation. Gods, he really didn't want to lie to this man, not when he'd gone through the worst kind of betrayal with Kaito.

He still couldn't believe it.

His whole life was a lie: his mother, his name, and his roots.

"Jason," he said trying to find words to explain the reason why he'd come back without lying. "I came back here because this is the first place in my life I've felt safe. Here with you."

Toshiro shook his head.

"I feel as though anything is possible."

Jason pushed off the counter and came to pull out a chair beside him. He sat and took Toshiro's right hand in his.

"What is going on, Toshiro? Does this have to do with why you were stabbed?"

Toshiro stared at their clasped hands.

"I want you to let me stay here without needing answers," he said after a moment. He met Jason's green gaze. "I know it's too much to ask, and—,"

He broke off and dropped his gaze to their clasped hands.

"I'll understand if you want me to leave."

"Toshiro, I don't want you to leave," Jason said. "I just want to help you. Can't you trust me?"

Trust.

Jason's sincere green eyes made him want to learn how to trust.

"Help me by letting me stay without asking questions," Toshiro said, his gaze pleading.

Jason studied him for a moment. That moment seemed like a year to Toshiro. A tight knot formed in his stomach, as he hoped Jason would agree.

"Stay as long as you need."

The knot in his stomach eased.

He watched Jason get up and walk to the counter. Jason took two mugs from the cupboard above and placed them next to the coffee maker.

"Toshiro."

"Yes?"

Jason didn't turn to look at him.

"Don't leave me without a goodbye this time. Promise me."

When Toshiro didn't answer right away, Jason turned and seeing his determined expression, Toshiro answered.

"I promise."

***

Chapter Four

Time passed quickly the next week.

Toshiro adjusted to a simple routine: waking up early in the morning to sit on the deck watching the sunrise over the lake. He made breakfast for Jason, who always woke up at around seven in the morning.

They ate breakfast together.

Jason helped with the dishes, and then disappeared into the workroom behind the house. Leaving Toshiro to fend for himself until lunchtime.

Toshiro didn't mind the time alone. He'd taken on the house chores. The mundane activities soothed him, took his thoughts away from the mess he'd created in the city.

Bouts of rage swept through him each time he thought about what Kaito's family had done to him. He couldn't go home to Japan, not after he'd handed over the Caribea stock certificates accompanied by a confession that guaranteed the end of Kaito's hold on legitimate business. Agent Baron had wanted to keep him in protective custody, but Toshiro refused. Kaito's reach in the police department went too high. Kaito's men would find him within hours if he chose Baron's protection. No, this place was the best choice.

_Only for a while_ , he thought with a sigh.

Agent Baron's promise to get Kaito behind bars rang in his head. Toshiro scoffed and wiped the window with a white cotton cloth. Agent Baron was under the assumption that once Kaito was in custody, Toshiro would return to his old life.

Toshiro had stared at the FBI agent thinking him an idiot. In his world, there was no safety anymore. Kaito's men would hunt Toshiro down and kill him. If they failed, those who replaced them would keep up the manhunt. The only way out was death: his or the Takumi Family.

With that truth in mind, he knew that coming back to Penn Yan and Jason was a mistake.

_A terrible mistake_ , he thought as he stared at his reflection in the window.

His gaze barely saw the neat lawn, or the tree line beyond. Instead, he saw a man who was living on borrowed time, reflected in the clean windows.

This place, staying with Jason, it was a selfish attempt to discover what a world without murder and deception looked like.

Toshiro begged the gods to allow him this one huge selfish mistake.

Just this once, he prayed, he wanted to feel happy, safe, and maybe love, even if he couldn't stay long.

It wouldn't do for Kaito to find Jason.

Toshiro finished cleaning the living room. The dark brown comfortable couches were neat, the cushions inviting. The coffee table carved out of a log was clean. He arranged the magazines he'd leafed through last night and the newspapers he couldn't stop reading. Agent Baron's investigation into Caribea had made the papers thrice in the past week. The Carrey family was glad to have their company back in their hands, but now everyone wanted to know how they'd lost control.

Toshiro hoped Agent Baron knew what he was doing. Otherwise, Kaito's men would end them before Agent Baron's investigation could succeed.

Picking up the vacuum cleaner, Toshiro took it to a closet in the hallway which he'd found filled with cleaning equipment and supplies.

Pushing his worries aside, he headed to the kitchen. He made a fresh pot of coffee and picked up the recipe book he'd found in a drawer earlier in the week. Leafing through it, he smiled when he found a recipe for chocolate chip cookies. Placing the book on the counter, he washed his hands with a pleased smile.

Yesterday, he'd discovered Jason was partial to chocolate when he found a bag of Hershey's kisses in the workshop. He had no doubt Jason would love chocolate chip cookies.

***

Jason rubbed his thumb over the stones set into the gold ring. The diamond and sapphire stones were solid. Happy they wouldn't come off; he picked up a sharp graver and cut a nice straight line beside the stones. The stones remained intact. Jason picked up the square graver and started making a simple leaf motif on the top and sides of the gold ring.

The workshop door opened just as he was polishing the finished ring and the scent of fresh-baked cookies filled the room when Toshiro walked in.

"Hey," Toshiro greeted. "I thought you might be hungry."

"You're spoiling me," he said with a smile when Toshiro brought a tray with a flask, a mug and a plate of cookies to the table. "This week you've walked in here with all kinds of pastries. Is this a new hobby?"

Toshiro smiled, the sight of it sent Jason's heart on a wild dance. It seemed to be the constant state of his heart these days. Having Toshiro in the house was pleasure turned into a form of torture. The urge to kiss Toshiro senseless overwhelmed him every time he looked into those gorgeous honeyed eyes.

Not knowing if Toshiro felt the same way was driving him insane.

"I brought a flask of coffee to go with the cookies," Toshiro said tugging a stool close to the workbench. "What are you making today?"

Jason watched Toshiro pour coffee into the mug.

"An eternity ring," he answered taking the finished ring and handing it to Toshiro. "What do you think?"

"Beautiful!" Toshiro exclaimed as he studied the ring. "You amaze me, Jason. The things you do with metal."

Jason smiled and picked up a cookie, he took a bite and the taste of chocolate filled his mouth. He moaned in appreciation as he realized Toshiro had discovered his secret love affair with chocolate.

"These are good," he managed around a mouthful.

Flaky and gooey, he could eat a dozen in one sitting. He grinned at Toshiro making him laugh.

"What?"

Toshiro touched the corner of Jason's mouth with a thumb.

"I think you love chocolate too much."

"How did you know?" Jason asked sipping coffee.

Toshiro placed the ring on the red velvet cloth on the table. He pushed his stool back and opened a drawer under the worktable.

"Found your stash," Toshiro said taking a bag of Hershey's kisses out.

Jason blushed.

Toshiro chuckled as he returned the bag and closed the drawer.

"How did you start making jewelry?" Toshiro asked, as he picked up a sterling silver eternity ring and studied the emerald stones.

"I used to help my mom make beaded jewelry when I was in high school. We sold the jewelry online to make extra money for bills. After high school, I decided to learn more about jewelry and ended up training under a jeweler in Newark. She sponsored me into the Jewelry Arts Institute. When I graduated, I tried working with a few shops in the city. It didn't work out, and I ended up back here in Penn Yan. That's when Sean and I decided to open Silverstone."

"Your shop is charming." Toshiro returned the ring to the red velvet. He touched the ten other rings on the fabric. "You're lucky, Jason."

Jason placed his coffee cup on the wooden worktable his gaze on Toshiro's pensive expression.

"Why do you always sound so sad, Toshi?"

"Toshi?"

"Yes, Toshi." Jason rubbed the frown on Toshiro's face. "Answer my question."

"I'm not sad," Toshiro said shifting on his seat.

"I think you're lying to me." Jason ran a caressing finger over Toshiro's jaw then dropped his hand to the table. "Whenever you're ready to trust me, I'll listen. You know that, right?"

Toshiro smiled at him.

"I know."

Jason nodded and sipped his coffee.

"I'm done with working for now. I feel like I've neglected you this week, closing myself in this workshop. Want to go out on the lake?"

"Are you going to teach me how to fish?"

"Sure, we can have fish for dinner," Jason suggested, excited at the prospect of hours spent with Toshiro.

This past week, he'd worked at giving Toshiro space; letting him settle in and get comfortable. It was too obvious that something was bothering Toshiro. He wished Toshiro would trust him, but he knew that would take time. Toshiro smiled at him again and Jason decided he was done giving space.

***

"There are no fish in this lake," Toshiro complained two hours later.

Jason shifted his feet on the floor of the boat and sat back in his seat. He sipped his beer and studied Toshiro.

"Well, they won't show up with all the noise you're making," he said lazily.

"This would work better if we had a net, you know," Toshiro said, his voice tinged with irritation. "A huge net, cast out to catch fish, then we'd just drag it up."

Jason smiled.

"I thought you told me you didn't know how to fish?"

Toshiro blinked at him before he shrugged.

"I _imagine_ a net would work better than a hook and worm. If I was a fish, I'd surely know I was being cheated."

Jason laughed.

"Fish don't have long term memory."

"How do you know that?"

"I just do."

Toshiro scoffed.

"You're not a fish. How can you know?"

"I just do," Jason said lazily enjoying Toshiro's irritation.

"You could be wrong," Toshiro pointed out wanting to get the last word in.

Those light brown eyes stared at him with challenge. Jason wanted to reach out and smooth out the small frown lines creasing Toshiro's forehead. Instead of keeping up their silly argument, he chose another tactic.

"Do you always get this cranky when you're out fishing?"

Toshiro leaned back in his seat, and crossed his arms against his chest.

"I don't fish."

Well, that wasn't a yes or no. Did that mean that Toshiro had fished before? Toshiro's past intrigued him.

Jason wanted to know what had put that troubled look in Toshiro's eyes.

"What do you do for fun?"

"For fun?" Toshiro repeated as though it was a trick question.

"I like fishing for fun. I have a loft over the shop in town. Some days I close the shop early, so that I can watch football on the flat screen in my living room or Sean and I go play pool at the local pub."

Jason smiled at Toshiro.

"What do you like doing?"

Toshiro's gaze slid away from him and instead roamed their surroundings. They'd stopped the boat in the middle of the lake.

Jason liked the endless feeling he got sitting in this particular spot. Surrounded by trees, the water an endless sheet on all sides, it humbled a man to be so small in the vast beautiful setting.

Watching Toshiro take in the scene quickly became his most favorite thing to do just then.

Toshiro dropped his gaze to his lap and stared at a spot on his black jeans. When he spoke, painful nostalgia tinged his tone.

"I—uh—I used to have a bicycle when I was around eight. I would ride it to all kinds of places. I loved the feel of the wind on my face." Toshiro smiled ruefully. "I haven't ridden a bike since then."

"Why?"

Toshiro shrugged and shook his head.

"Lots of things changed, no time to run around acting like a carefree child."

Jason put his beer in the cooler on the floor of the boat and sat up in his seat.

"You can always ride again. I'm sure there are a couple of bikes in the garage."

Toshiro lifted his head to meet his gaze.

"Are you always this positive?"

"No." Jason took Toshiro's right hand in his. "I'm only this way around you."

"You don't say?"

"Can't help it, you have this tragic air about you. You make me want to dispel it."

"Jason...."

Jason moved to the edge of his seat, so that he could close the distance between him and Toshiro. Their gazes held, Toshiro's full of uncertainty.

Jason grabbed on to Toshiro's open jacket and pulled him closer. He bent his head to take Toshiro's lips in a warm soft kiss. He lingered when Toshiro leaned into him. Tasting Toshiro's full bottom lip, his tongue tracing, teasing, he kissed Toshiro again, this time Toshiro responded, kissing him back.

Jason pulled back slightly, and met dazed light brown eyes. Relief flooded him when Toshiro didn't protest, or push him away. Instead, that honeyed gaze he was starting to love fell on his lips. He read longing on Toshiro's face, that knowledge heated his blood. It was good to know he wasn't the only one caught in this attraction.

"I've wanted to kiss you since that day in the hospital when you told me you weren't good for me."

Cupping Toshiro's face between his palms, he kissed him again.

"I wanted to kiss you and tell you I didn't care."

Toshiro closed his eyes.

"You should care, Jason."

"Why?"

"Because." Toshiro opened his eyes and tried to move away.

Jason wouldn't allow it, so he dropped his gaze.

"I wasn't kidding when I told you I wasn't good for you."

Jason kissed him again: a frenzied, needy kiss that had them both breathing hard. When he broke off, he pulled Toshiro into his arms. Putting them both in an awkward position on the boat, but he didn't care.

"Let's make a deal," he said against Toshiro's ear.

He closed his eyes when Toshiro's arms slowly moved around him and tightened.

"What kind of deal?" Toshiro asked, his voice muffled by Jason's windbreaker.

"For as long as you're here with me, you'll stop putting yourself down."

Jason rubbed Toshiro's back over his leather jacket.

"Whether you're good, or bad, it doesn't matter to me."

"What happens when I leave?"

Jason sighed.

"Don't think about leaving either."

Toshiro chuckled.

"Are we planning an imaginary world here?"

"Maybe," Jason said wishfully. "I want to hold you like this for as long as I can. So, just say yes to what I say and go along with it. Deal?"

***

Eyes closed, his face buried in the curve of Jason's neck, Toshiro took in a deep breath, filling his lungs with Jason's enticing scent. His heart squeezed tight, so tight, it was painful.

"Toshi?" Jason prompted in his ear.

Toshiro opened his eyes and made a promise he was sure he shouldn't keep.

"Deal," he said.

Jason held him tighter. He melted against Jason's warmth letting it soothe his tattered soul. He was disappointed when Jason let him go.

Toshiro didn't understand how it was possible for a man to be so warm, so giving and comforting.

Their conversation lightened, Jason told him stories of growing up in Penn Yan. His face lighting up as he talked about his mother who now lived with her new husband.

"I thought I'd hate seeing her get married, but watching her with him makes me smile," Jason said. "They're so in love. I get jealous that she found someone to be with her as she ages."

Toshiro couldn't help but wonder about his own mother. Did she think about him? He'd heard rumors that she was tough and ruthless in business. Did she love his father?

"What about you, Toshi?" Jason asked him. "What were your parents like? Did you get to meet them before they died?"

Toshiro wiped a hand down his face.

"I—uh—I don't like talking about it."

"It's good to talk about your parents, Toshi," Jason insisted. "You'll keep their memory alive that way."

"I was too young to remember much," Toshiro said unable to keep out the bitterness. "I don't have a single memory. Can we please change this subject?"

"Toshiro," Jason started.

Toshiro grabbed his fishing rod and pulled it out of the water.

"Can we go back now? I'm getting cold out here."

Toshiro ignored Jason's concerned gaze, trying to push back the anger that swelled each time he thought about his family. He didn't want to talk or think about his parents. He wasn't worthy of being a Natake. That family was full of upstanding members of society, he'd seen the Natakes run projects to help the poor, and abused.

He, on the other hand, had spent most of his life reducing good people to the state of abused, or worse.

How could his father ever look at him and be proud? How could Jason if he were to find out the truth about him?

"I've said something to upset you," Jason said touching his left arm. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize," Toshiro said. "I'm—

He broke off and met Jason's concerned gaze.

"I'm not used to sharing. You have to give me time."

Jason smiled, the sight of it disarming him.

"I don't mind, Toshi. Since we didn't catch any fish, should we get back to the dock and find out what we'll have for dinner?"

"That sounds good," he agreed as Jason got his fishing rod back into the boat.

"Maybe we should bring fishing nets next time," Jason teased as he started the motor.

Toshiro shuddered.

"No way, who would prepare and cook all that fish?"

"You," Jason said with a grin.

"Hells no," Toshi laughed. "I'd definitely leave it to you, mister."

***

That evening, Toshiro was in the common bathroom after a shower, his concentration centered on the healing wound on his right arm when Jason knocked on the door.

"Are you decent?"

"Yeah," Toshiro said as he taped a bandage over the healing bullet wound on his arm. He was looking forward to removing Agent Baron's stitches.

"How did you get that?" Jason asked in shock behind him.

Toshiro met Jason's gaze through the mirror.

"It's just a scratch."

"A scratch?" Jason closed the distance between them and took his right arm studying the bandage. "You didn't have this when you left Penn Yan."

Toshiro sighed.

"Remember your promise about no questions."

Jason cursed under his breath touching the bandage on Toshiro's arm.

"Toshi—

"It's best for both of us if you don't ask," Toshiro said. "I'm fine, Jason."

"You're not fine." Jason let go of his arm. He let out another harsh sigh when he saw Toshiro's back. "Look at these, goodness if someone saw you they'd think you live in a war zone."

Toshiro shrugged.

"I'm sorry the scars disgust you."

"Disgust me?" Jason straightened staring at him through the mirror with surprise. "Is that what you think?"

Toshiro placed a towel over his hair and rubbed vigorously to get the excess water off. He didn't like thinking about his life in the Takumi compound. With Kaito, the scars hadn't mattered; they'd been a mark of survival.

But with Jason—his hands froze in his hair when he felt Jason touch his naked shoulder.

Roughened fingertips traced a path along his shoulder blades, pausing to touch faded scars and bumps. Toshiro closed his eyes, biting his lower lip to keep from moaning. Jason's soft caresses sent riotous electric thrills through his body that turned to blazing flames when Jason kissed his left shoulder.

"What are you doing?" he asked opening his eyes to meet Jason's intense green gaze in the mirror.

"Showing you that your scars don't disgust me," Jason answered. "All I want to know is why they are so many. Who did this to you, Toshi?"

Toshiro dragged off the towel on his head and dropped it on the sink counter. There was nowhere to escape. He was trapped between the sink counter and Jason. All the blood rushed to his cock, when Jason continued his caresses, touching wounds he'd healed long ago.

"Tell me," Jason cajoled, pressing a kiss on the back of his neck.

Toshiro gritted his teeth against Jason's seductive voice.

"I had an adventurous childhood."

"Toshi," Jason said, no doubt ready to push for more information.

Toshiro turned to face him keenly aware of his erection tenting the towel around his hips. He took Jason's right hand and brought it to his cock.

"You don't need to seduce me, Jason. I'll sleep with you, let you take me and do what you want."

"Shh...." Jason pressed a finger over his lips.

Toshiro licked Jason's index finger wishing Jason would take the offer and not ask anymore.

Jason tugged off Toshiro's towel letting it drop to the tiled floor.

Need slammed through him as he watched Jason's hot gaze slide over him. That green gaze was different from what he'd had with Kaito. Jason's green gaze didn't make his skin crawl, or ignite fear. Instead, he burned. He wanted Jason to touch him and kiss him.

His breath exploded from his lungs when Jason cupped his erection. The feel of Jason's strong hand stroking him, thumb swept over his sensitive swollen head, drawing him close to a climax.

"If I took you right now, would that make you happy?" Jason asked him.

He met Jason's gaze and nodded.

_Yes, anything that felt this good would make him happy._

He closed his eyes when Jason stroked him again, hard and fast, so good, he came without warning. A scorching wave of bliss swept through him from head to toe, he clung to Jason's arms and dropped his forehead on Jason's shoulder, spurting cum on his stomach and into Jason's hand. His cheeks flushed with embarrassment. He'd never lost control so easily, not since his twelfth year when Kaito had kissed him in the alley behind a bar. Jason wiped his hand on the towel on the sink counter and pulled him into his arms, uncaring the cum on Toshiro's stomach would ruin his t-shirt.

Jason held Toshiro with such care; confusing him because sex had never involved this kind of closeness for him.

Toshiro started to reach for Jason's belt to return the favor, but Jason stopped him.

"I can wait, Toshi," Jason said into his ear. "I'll wait until you get to know me better."

"I don't want to wait." Toshiro leaned back to look into Jason's eyes. "Don't make me wait, Jason. I want you. Don't you want me?"

"I do, you have no idea how much but you're not ready. When you and I get together, I don't want you to forget it, Toshi. I don't want it to be instant sex and that's it," Jason said, and then kissed Toshiro. "I want it to matter to both of us."

Once again, confusion ensued at the tender way Jason touched him. As though he were fragile and could break at any moment. His eyes slid closed when Jason's kisses trailed along his jaw, to his neck. When Jason just held him, it set his heart trembling and a new fear rose at the thought of losing this man and his gentle kisses.

***

Chapter Five

"Open," Toshiro said, holding out a small carrot cube.

Jason grinned and obeyed. He took the carrot piece into his mouth crunching on the fresh vegetable morsel.

They sat at the kitchen table. Toshiro was peeling carrots and dicing them while he sat writing delivery notes for the jewelry he'd drop at the shop later.

Jason had woken up this morning to find Toshiro in the living room reading intently on his laptop, a small frown dancing on Toshiro's forehead. Jason had wanted to know why that frown was there. Before he could ask, Toshiro had moved the laptop to the coffee table and smiled at him, inviting him for breakfast.

They ended up in the workroom. Toshiro helped him pack up the jewelry he'd made during the week. Now here they were, Toshiro working steadily to follow a recipe for lunch. He looked happy and relaxed. Although once in a while, Jason caught the shadow of worry in those light brown eyes.

"You're watching me," Toshiro said with a teasing tone. "I think you should give up on those delivery notes. You've only written five."

"You're distracting me," Jason said, placing his pen down and leaning his elbows on the table to study Toshiro openly. "I think we've found your new hobby."

"Oh yeah," Toshiro asked cutting carrots with expert precision. He was good with a knife. "What is that?"

"Cooking and baking," Jason said with a small smile.

Toshiro laughed.

Gods how he loved it when Toshiro laughed. It brightened up Toshiro's face, made him look younger. He reached out to touch the corner of Toshiro's smiling mouth.

"You could be a chef," Jason suggested letting his hand drop away.

"No way," Toshiro shook his head. "I'm just very good at following instructions. Stop watching me and write out your deliveries."

"Will you come with me to the shop?"

Toshiro stood and carried the chopped carrots to the kitchen counter.

"Sure, we need to go shopping anyway. We're running low."

"Wanna watch a movie with me?" Jason asked.

"A movie?" Toshiro asked looking at him. "Do you mean like a date?"

"Yeah," Jason said with a small grin.

Toshiro beamed.

"I'd love to go."

"Alright, great." Jason nodded.

They stared at each other for a moment then Toshiro turned on the water at the sink.

"Write your delivery notes, Jason. You're distracting me."

Jason chuckled and picked up his pen pleased with Toshiro's enthusiasm.

They drove into town after lunch.

Toshiro helped him carry the two boxes of jewelry into Silverstone. They found Claire packing up a set of blue glass vases for a young woman. Claire waved at Jason in greeting and he returned the wave with a smile.

He led Toshiro to a long table in one corner where they placed the boxes.

"Jason," Sean said and he turned to find his ex-boyfriend coming from the office they kept in the back of the shop.

"Hi Sean," he said. Jason tugged Toshiro to his side. "I'd like you to meet Toshiro. Toshi, this is my business partner, Sean."

"Hi." Toshiro held out his hand to Sean. "Nice to meet you."

Sean took Toshiro's hand and held on.

"Are you the guy Jason saved?"

"I came back to thank him properly," Toshiro said with a small smile.

"Wow," Sean shook Toshiro's hand and let go. "You look well and handsome. I can see why Jason was thinking about you."

Toshiro chuckled and Jason pinched Sean's arm.

"Don't start teasing. I brought you more eternity rings. Also, the orders Claire asked for on Monday."

Sean moved to touch the boxes on the table though his attention was on Toshiro.

"Are you staying with Jason?" Sean asked Toshiro.

"Yeah, for a few more days," Toshiro answered.

Jason felt a wave of disappointment flood him. He didn't want to think about Toshiro leaving, preferred to imagine Toshiro was here to stay.

"Stop interrogating my friend, Sean," he said, putting his arm over Toshiro's shoulder. "We're going to the movie theater, and then doing grocery shopping."

"The movies sound like a lot of fun," Sean said thoughtfully taking a step back to study them. "Keira was right. You two do make a cute couple."

Jason met Sean's gaze surprised by the compliment. He smiled when Sean winked at him.

"We'd better get going," Jason said, returning Sean's smile. "I'm taking a break next week, Sean."

"That's shocking, are you sure you're the same guy I know? What has the water done to you out there?" Sean teased. "Toshiro, it was nice to meet you."

"You too, Sean," Toshiro said with a small nod.

"'Bye, Sean." Jason led Toshiro toward the exit. "Call me only if there's an emergency."

Toshiro chuckled as they left the store.

"What was that about?"

"Sean thinks I don't know how to be spontaneous."

Toshiro gave a small laugh and Jason stopped him in the middle of the street.

"What was that laugh?" he demanded moving in front of Toshiro to look into his eyes.

"Well," Toshiro said skeptically.

Jason narrowed his gaze and Toshiro laughed.

"I'll show you spontaneous," Jason said.

Holding the lapels of Toshiro's leather jacket, he tugged him close and bent his head, covering Toshiro's lips with his. The kiss was a sweet exploring kiss that made him smile when Toshiro moved closer and gave a soft moan.

"Jason Stone," Mrs. Baker, the woman who owned the flower shop right next door to his shop stood a few feet away. "What are you doing on the street?"

Jason ended the kiss and smiled when Toshiro's eyes remained closed.

"I'm kissing my boyfriend, Mrs. Baker."

"Find a room," she ordered her voice filled with amusement.

He pulled Toshiro into his arms and grinned at her.

"I'm showing him how spontaneous I can be."

"Sure," Mrs. Baker shook her head and Toshiro punched his arm lightly. "Go on, now. You're igniting gossip in this town."

Jason flashed a smile at her and took Toshiro's hand, heading to the movie theater in the next block.

"Does everyone know you in this town?" Toshiro demanded beside him.

"Pretty much," Jason said. "It comes with growing up in a small town. I've seen the same faces all through grade school, and high school. It's hard to hide much."

Toshiro nodded and tugged his jacket closed as the wind picked up.

"This place gets windy and rainy because of the lake," Jason explained, placing an arm over Toshiro's shoulders. "Are you cold?"

"Are you going to warm me up?"

"Didn't that kiss do it?" Jason asked.

Toshiro laughed.

"Should I say no?"

"If you do, I'm going to stop you right here and kiss you senseless again."

Toshiro grinned, his gaze full of a challenge that Jason couldn't ignore.

***

They chose an action movie; Jason swore it was interesting. They sat in the back row of the darkened theater. Jason moved the armrests up making space between their chairs. Toshiro sat with his head resting on Jason's shoulder, the tub of popcorn on his lap. However, Toshiro concentrated on Jason instead of the movie. He'd thought of nothing else since their encounter in the bathroom yesterday.

Jason's protective nature fascinated him. Jason had this gentle patient way of dealing with situations, and people. He laughed easily, worked hard, and for some unknown reason saw such a different side in Toshiro, it was painful sometimes to see Jason look at him.

Toshiro didn't know if he could live up to the man that Jason saw in him. But on the other hand, watching Jason, sitting next to him, having him so close, it placed Toshiro in a different world. One he'd never known before Jason. One he dared dream to keep.

His heart squeezed tight at that thought. The idea of keeping Jason, remaining here watching movies and playing house left Toshiro trembling.

It would mean telling Jason the truth.

He would have to tell Jason about his past, and the danger lurking in the shadows. He spent hours imagining Jason's reaction to his story, all the scenes he imagined involved Jason telling him to pack his duffel bag and leave.

"Pay attention to the movie," Jason whispered in his ear. "You're missing out on all the action."

Toshiro sighed aware that he didn't care for the action brewing on the screen. All he wanted right now was Jason for as long as he could have him.

Placing the tub of popcorn on the empty chair to his left, Toshiro touched Jason's jaw, shifting in his seat so that he could kiss him. He was glad they'd chosen the back, no one to care what they did up here. He kissed Jason, letting their kiss simmer, slowly build, then turn into a hungry flame that had them clinging to one another. Thoughts of watching the movie faded away when Jason dragged him on to his lap. They made out for the next hour, like kids in high school, pausing only to take in air, and even that felt like a waste of time to Toshiro when he could be exploring Jason's delicious mouth.

They strolled through the city after the movie ended, walking hand in hand, pausing occasionally to window shop.

Jason told Toshiro stories of the different shops in the town. From Mrs. Baker who owned the flower shop, and lived on the outskirts of town. How she'd raised four rowdy boys, who'd all joined the army, with the income she made from the flower shop. To the baker's son who was now married to Jason's ex, Sean.

Lights lit up the charming streets. Jason greeted most of the people who passed them. Toshiro was keenly aware that this was a tight knit community. He wanted to be part of this, part of Jason's world. He sighed, tightening his hold on Jason's hand.

"What are you thinking about?" Jason asked as they headed to the supermarket.

Toshiro smiled at him.

"I'm thinking that I like you very much, Jason Stone."

"Is that so?" Jason said with a wide grin. "I like you too, Toshiro Shindo. I wish you'd like me enough to tell me what's bothering you."

Toshiro squeezed Jason's hand.

"Maybe, I'm not telling you because I like you so much."

"That doesn't make sense."

"Why?"

"Because if you care for someone, you tell them how you feel, what you're going through so that they know and don't worry about you all the time."

"Are you saying you're worried for me?" Toshiro asked, once again the concept felt foreign to him.

"Of course," Jason said with a frown. "Aren't you worried about me?"

Toshiro smiled.

"What happens if I say no?"

Jason stopped outside the supermarket.

"I'll tickle you right here until you submit and confess the truth."

Toshiro laughed.

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Keep laughing," Jason took a step closer, wiggling his fingers as though he was going to carry out his threat.

Toshiro let go of Jason's hand and dashed to the supermarket entrance. He didn't want Jason guessing how ticklish he really was, even the threat of it, made him want to laugh.

He grabbed a shopping cart as Jason came in to join him.

"I'll cook you something nice if you don't tickle me."

Jason folded his hands against his chest.

"Like what?"

"Chicken," Toshiro suggested leaning on the cart as they went down the aisle.

"I think the Watsons have a grill, let's get steaks instead. I'll help you make them," Jason suggested as they headed to the dairy aisle.

"Toshiro."

"Hmm," Toshiro said stopping to take two percent milk because it was Jason's favorite. He grabbed four cartons and placed them in the cart.

"You'd tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?" Jason asked.

Toshiro stopped to study him wishing his life were simpler. Meeting Jason's concerned gaze, he wondered if it wouldn't be better to tell Jason the truth.

***

Rumbling thunder woke Toshiro at two in the morning on Sunday. He sat up on his bed staring at the shifting curtains covering his windows. Heart pounding hard, he reached to switch on the lamp on the bedside table to dispel the shadows.

Another low rumble came and he leaned back on the headboard, rubbing his eyes with a sigh. He shivered as a cool wind swept into the room and he turned to see the curtains moving. Sliding out of his bed, Toshiro rushed to the window and swept the curtain back.

The window was open, he slid it closed biting back panic as thunder rolled in again, and the slash of lighting lit up the sky and the flower garden behind the house. An uneasy feeling swept through him, growing more when he saw mud on the windowpane.

Fear slammed him and he ran out of his bedroom heading to Jason's room down the corridor. The door was open, hurrying in without a second thought, a wild cry wrenched from him when he saw blood on the white pillows. Jason's head lying at a strange angle, his green eyes wide open and unseeing...

Toshiro sat up with a gasp, barely able to hold back his loud moan. He took in a deep breath and looked around his bedroom. It was dark, the curtains still, thunder rumbled but it wasn't as dramatic as his dream. Getting off the bed, he went to check his window anyway. Pushing back the curtain to make sure the window remained closed. There was no one, only rain and waving trees in the lawn, he let the curtain drop and took a step back.

The dreams that plagued him when he slept...just imagining waking up to find Kaito in the house...he pushed his hair back and left his bedroom.

He walked down the corridor to Jason's door. He entered Jason's bedroom with quiet footsteps going to the bed to check on Jason.

Jason lay sprawled on the bed, his blonde hair tousled as he hugged his pillow. Jason was fast asleep, lost in his dreams.

Safe and sound, _alive_.

Toshiro fought the urge to stroke his fingers through the soft blond strands and instead dragged the covers over Jason's bare shoulders. Leaving Jason's room, he closed the door and went to the great room.

The rain kept falling. Raindrops drumming a frenzied beat on every surface they could.

Toshiro sank to the floor and sat staring into the dark night.

He thought about the night he'd watched Kaito's father kill that woman he'd loved like a mother. It had rained that night too, but what he remembered most was the smell in that horrible room behind the main house. That putrid stench that came from pig manure, so rotten and nauseating, he gagged every time he got a whiff. The Takumi Clan bred pigs for clean up purposes. He'd sworn of pork the moment he'd realized the type of diet those pigs lived on. The stench of pig manure reminded him of death.

Toshiro closed his eyes, remembering the sound of Ryu Takumi's fists against that woman's face. Hard blows that had torn skin, bloodstains on that woman's dress, her eyes swollen and red. She'd stopped crying after Ryu Takumi had threatened to hurt Toshiro. Toshiro cried for her instead because in her own way, despite the drugs they gave her, despite her need for that high, she'd loved him. She had loved him enough to endure Ryu's brutality in silence.

That woman was the last person to show him love. She was the last to hold him, or chastise him with affection, to care if he ate or slept.

_The last person until Jason,_ he thought with a sigh.

"Toshi," Jason said startling him.

Jason sat to his left and bumped his shoulder affectionately.

"Couldn't sleep?"

"The storm woke me up," Toshiro said.

They sat in silence each lost in their own thoughts, watching the rain.

"What are you thinking about in the dark?" Jason asked after a while.

"How tired I am of lies," he said with a long sigh.

"If you're tired of lies, then embrace the truth."

"That simple?"

"Yep," Jason said.

"What if the truth is ugly?"

"Even if the truth is ugly," Jason said. "It's better than lying."

Toshiro turned to look at Jason's profile.

Sitting here in the dark, remembering their date, Jason's teasing and their kisses, it suddenly seemed so easy. So easy to just tell Jason the truth. Maybe if he could tell Jason, then he'd have a chance, a way forward. A way to live because he was so tired, so exhausted of this darkness inside him.

Toshiro stood up abruptly and went to turn on a lamp set on a stool by the couch. Yellow light flooded the room and he came back to sit on the floor facing Jason. He took Jason's right hand, clinging to the surge of courage inside him. He swallowed hard and traced the rough lines on the tips of Jason's fingers caused by working with metal.

"I've never met anyone like you," Toshiro said.

He kept his head down, planning his story.

"Hard working, kind, and generous, I never got the chance to be any of those things."

Toshiro scoffed quietly and shook his head.

"Seeing you, makes me want to find out if there is more to life than what I've known. You said I should get to know you better before we can go further, but I think you're the one who needs to know who and what I am."

"Toshi?" Jason asked.

"Please listen, Jason, before I lose my nerve," Toshiro said. "I knew the man who stabbed me in the forest the day you saved me."

"What?"

"His name is Kaito Takumi. I've lived with his family since I was born. They paid for my school, my university." Toshiro swallowed hard as he lifted his head to meet Jason's shocked gaze. "They own me, Jason."

"What do you mean they own you?" Jason squeezed his hand. "No one can own you."

Toshiro shook his head in amusement.

"Yes, it is possible to own a man, Jason. The Takumi Clan owned me up until three weeks ago. When I'd served my purpose, Kaito Takumi stabbed me and left me for dead. I'd have died and disappeared from this world without anyone batting an eyelash."

"But you didn't die, Toshi." Jason touched his jaw with his left hand. "Please don't talk about yourself as though you don't matter. I don't like it."

Toshiro let go of Jason's hand, folded his hands on his lap and met Jason's kind gaze.

"Maybe it will make sense if I start from the beginning. The first thing I remember as a child is playing with a surgical needle. My m—,"

Toshiro hesitated, and then continued.

"My mother was a whore, who got high every moment she could. She worked at the bar the Takumi family owned in Kobe. We lived in a one-bedroom apartment on the third floor above the bar. Despite her pleasures, she was good to me. She made sure I ate, slept and was dressed. She's the one who bought me a bicycle and would watch me ride it in the alley behind the bar."

"We didn't have much, but I think living in her house is the happiest I've ever been," Toshiro said with a small smile. "Anyway, one night when I turned eight, I came home from playing with the neighborhood kids to find the head of the Takumi clan had taken my mother. His men were ransacking our small apartment and when they finished, they took me back to the Takumi compound. There, I found Ryu Takumi beating my mother to death in this horrible room he used for torture."

Jason moved to take his hand but Toshiro refused. He had to get this out or he never would.

"She died that night," Toshiro said. "I cried and mourned for her."

He shook his head with a sigh.

"Ryu Takumi told me her death was a lesson. A lesson that there was no mercy and I shouldn't expect any from him or the world. His hard tone dried my tears fast, I was afraid he'd kill me next. He said I amused him, so he turned me into Kaito's errand boy that night. My career in an organized crime family started there."

Toshiro stared at the floor.

"I have done things."

"What kind of things?" Jason asked.

"Terrible things," Toshiro shook his head. "The list is too long. Stealing, fighting, extortion, kidnapping, solicitation, if you count it all, I'm headed to hell."

"Toshi," Jason said moving to touch him, but he wouldn't allow it.

Not until this was over.

"There is more," Toshiro said harshly. "You have to hear it all, Jason. You need to hear it."

"Then tell me," Jason said.

Toshiro stared at Jason's unchanging gaze, waiting for the disgust to creep in to those gorgeous green eyes.

"Life changed when I moved into the Takumi compound. They broke me down, whittling away weakness and fear, leaving only the need for survival. I learned fast. I did so well, that Ryu took notice," Toshiro said. "Ryu and Kaito wanted to increase their profits, so I learned all I could and helped them with their businesses. When I turned eighteen, Kaito had his father killed when Ryu refused to legitimize the business. After the funeral, Kaito sent me here to study finance. Suddenly, we weren't running the usual small businesses; instead, we were going after corporations in Japan and around the world. Extortion, murder, company takeovers, I've helped Kaito do it all."

"Why did he stab you?"

Toshiro's gaze fell to his lap.

"Kaito and I were lovers."

"Do you love him?" Jason asked.

"There was no place for love in our relationship," Toshiro answered shaking his head. "Kaito loves his money, and power, not people. He stabbed me because I was in the way."

"In the way of what?" Jason asked.

"In the way of his business," Toshiro covered his face with his hands. "It turns out the mother I thought was dead is not my real mother. The family I thought I didn't have exists. My whole life has been a lie."

"Toshiro," Jason moved closer wanting to pull him into his arms. When Toshiro tried to push him away, Jason snapped. "Will you let me hold you?"

"I thought you wanted to know where I went when I left."

"I do, but watching you struggle to tell me is driving me insane." Jason tangled their fingers and sighed. "I'm not going to change my mind about you, Toshi."

Toshi stared at their hands and shook his head.

"I'm quite sure you have no sense of self-preservation."

Jason squeezed his fingers.

"Where did you go? Why do you have that wound on your arm?"

"I went to confront Kaito."

"Why would you do that? You're crazy, Toshiro. He could have killed you."

"He tried," Toshiro said with a scoff. "I got away. Look, I needed to know why he stabbed me. I needed to know because it was personal. All those scars on my back are punishments from him for failing one thing or other. He's whipped me for refusing to shoot a boy who'd stolen bread from one of the bakeries he owns. He didn't kill me then, so why now?"

Toshiro shook his head.

"It turns out he did it to keep my real father from finding me."

"Why?"

"Because," Toshiro stood up unable to keep still. "The Takumi family kidnapped me from a wealthy neighboring family when I was a child. They hid me so well, and had me believe I was an orphan, while my real parents looked for me."

"Oh God," Jason sat staring at him. "Does that mean your mother is not dead?"

Toshiro nodded.

"My real mother is alive and well. So is my father. Apparently, he's spent years trying to find me. Now that he's so close, Kaito tried to kill me to win the game."

"Your parents being alive is good news, isn't it?" Jason asked. "I mean, you're not alone anymore—"

"I can never be with them," Toshiro said, hating the shame that washed over him. "I was so angry with Kaito when he told me the truth. I met up with an FBI Agent who has been on Kaito's case for a while and gave him all the evidence he needed. What I did is going to make Kaito lose everything he gained in the last few years. Kaito might end up in jail, but it won't stop him from making sure someone keeps looking for me. I'm a marked man, Jason."

"Marked man, like a hit?" Jason got off the floor. "Surely, the police can do something for you. Maybe put you in protective custody, witness protection—

"I wish it was that easy," Toshiro cut in. "The Takumi family has a long reach, even in protective custody, they'd get me. The only reason why I came back here is because Kaito would think I've headed to Japan."

Jason ran his hands through his hair.

"What are you telling me?"

Toshiro sighed and turned to face Jason.

"Since that woman I thought was my mother died, you're the first person to show me kindness in years. I was so tired after finishing with Agent Baron; I just wanted to see you. I don't know how long I can stay here with you, Jason. I don't even know if I can give you more than this coming week."

"So, you're in danger?" Jason asked studying him.

Toshiro shrugged.

"I'm always in danger, Jason. Kaito Takumi wants me dead. He'll do anything to make it happen."

***

Jason wiped a hand down his face. Toshiro's story sounded out of a movie. The conclusion would be that Toshiro was trouble.

Trouble with a big capital T.

Yet, he couldn't look at the younger man without wanting to protect him. There was this need burning inside him to pull Toshiro into his arms and tell him that all was fine. That Toshiro would be okay. That—

What was he thinking? If the police couldn't help, how was he supposed to help?

"Jason," Toshiro said then, his eyes sad. "I know it's a lot to take in."

"Don't talk," he said holding up his hand. "I'm thinking."

"About what?" Toshiro asked with a small smile.

"How can you smile like that?" he demanded.

Every cell in his body trembled with fear. Fear that this Kaito might find Toshiro. That Toshiro might die if he left this house.

"I'll leave if you want me to," Toshiro said looking at him with hollow eyes, there was no accusation, no hate, just acceptance.

"I said not to say another word," he ordered. "What was your plan? Come here, stay with me, have a good time, then go back to die? How long were you going to stay?"

Toshiro shrugged negligently.

"Two weeks."

"And then what?"

Toshiro looked out the window.

"Go back to Japan and figure out what to do, survive as always, if things went well I'd be free. If they don't..." he trailed off.

"You'd be dead," Jason finished for him.

Toshiro glanced at him then with a small shrug.

"That's just how things are in my life, Jason. Now you know the truth. Can you accept it?"

***

**Chapter Six**

"No." Jason shook his head and turned away from Toshiro. "There has to be another way, Toshiro."

"Another way for what?" Toshiro asked behind him.

"You can't stand there and tell me you've accepted you might die. What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" Toshiro asked.

"You heard me," Jason said turning to glare at him. "Don't you want to live, Toshi?"

"I'm just stating the truth," Toshiro said.

"Well, I don't accept that truth, Toshi."

Toshiro gave a soft sigh and nodded. Jason frowned at the accepting expression on Toshiro's face.

"I understand," Toshiro said and headed out of the great room going to his room.

Jason stared after him confused.

_What did Toshiro understand?_

Did he now know that they needed to fight this? Maybe they could talk to Jeff. The detective would know what to do.

Jason sighed and sat on the couch. Sean had been right about the mob. He knew enough to understand that they had to find a way to hide Toshiro.

He glanced up when he heard Toshiro returning from the bedroom and stood up when he saw Toshiro carrying his bag.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Leaving," Toshiro headed to the front door, "thanks for letting me stay."

Panic had Jason running to grab Toshiro's arm.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Who said you can go?"

Toshiro shrugged his hold off.

"I need to leave, Jason. I can't stay here if you don't want trouble. This is the best solution for both of us."

"For you maybe," Jason said afraid of the closed expression on Toshiro's face. "Where are you going to go? It's raining buckets, and in case you didn't notice, this is a small town. No buses run this late."

Toshiro adjusted his leather jacket and zipped it up.

"If someone comes asking about me, tell them you haven't seen me, Jason. Tell them the last time you saw me was in the hospital. Do you understand?"

"No."

Jason reached for Toshiro's right hand, his hand covering Toshiro's hold on his bag.

"You made me a promise, Toshi. Do you remember, out on the lake?"

"I'm sorry I can't keep it."

"So you're just going to walk away?"

"I would have done it next week," Toshiro said and lifted his head to meet Jason's gaze. "It would have been harder then, but I suppose now is better. Thank you, for—"

Toshiro broke off and bit his lower lip.

"For what?" Jason asked studying Toshiro's face.

God help him but he needed to find the right words to make Toshiro stay. What could he offer other than himself?

Toshiro managed a small smile, "For your kindness."

"I don't want your thanks, Toshi. You owe me a debt of life," Jason said abruptly. "You haven't paid it yet."

"Don't you think my leaving is enough? That way you stay safe, and I won't worry about them finding you too."

"That's not good enough," Jason insisted. "I want something I can see with my eyes everyday, for as long as I can."

Toshiro sighed studying him.

"What do you want?"

"You," Jason said.

Toshiro's fingers loosened on the bag he held and Jason took the bag away from him. He threw it in the direction of the great room not caring where it landed.

"You're crazier than I'd imagined." Toshiro shook his head. "Don't be like this, Jason. You might have saved me in the woods, but it won't change what I am. It won't change what's coming after me. Please ask for something else."

"I know if you walk out that door, you're never going to come back," Jason said his hands moving to Toshiro's shoulders. "So, I don't want anything else but you here with me. Can't you see how much I care about you?"

Toshiro closed his eyes.

"I can't stay if you don't accept what I am—"

"I accept what you are," Jason cut in.

When Toshiro opened his eyes and gave him a skeptical look, he elaborated.

"You're a victim of terrible circumstances. The things that happened to you, or what you've done, you did it to survive."

"You're wrong," Toshiro said, his eyes darkening. "It might have started out that way, but as the years passed, it wasn't survival, Jason. I was complacent. I never tried to make a change. The only reason I walked into Agent Baron's house was that I felt betrayed. It was a selfish act, not a selfless one. If I stay, you have to know that about me. That I've done the worst things you can imagine, without remorse, that is who you're letting stay—

Jason took Toshiro's lips in a despairing kiss to silence him. His fingers digging into Toshiro's hair, he pulled Toshiro closer not giving him a chance to talk. Desperately holding on as the storm raged outside. Toshiro clung to his arms, at first trying to push him away, but when he deepened their kiss, Toshiro held on.

Satisfied by Toshiro's response, he dropped his hands to Toshiro's jacket, unzipping it. He pushed the dark leather off Toshiro's shoulders and was glad when it dropped to the wooden floor. He reached for the edges of Toshiro's t-shirt and pulled it up, breaking their kiss so that he could tug it off.

"Jason," Toshiro started to protest when he dropped the black t-shirt to the floor.

"I don't care what you are. I'm not letting you leave," Jason said removing his own t-shirt.

He dropped it on top of Toshiro's and pulled Toshiro into his arms.

"I can't let you go."

***

"You're really insane," Toshiro said on a whisper when Jason kissed him again, sparks of electricity raced through him when Jason ran callused fingers over his back.

That's all it took, one touch and his body came alive. He forgot the reasons why he should walk out into the pounding rain. The exquisite heat building between them took over as Jason trailed kisses along his jaw. A soft gasp escaped when Jason licked the curve of his shoulder, and then sucked on sensitive skin.

Jason's kisses were demanding, insistent, he moaned and Jason took in the desperate sound, bunching his hair with a firm grip. The firm hold in his hair triggered the memory of Kaito grabbing his hair in the same way. Tight grip, the soft strands pulled painfully, it had brought tears to his eyes.

Jason swept his tongue into his mouth, his assault teasing, soothing. His gentleness so new it made him tremble, the memory of Kaito faded replaced by Jason's touch.

He lost himself in the feel of Jason's callused hands on his skin when they lay on the carpet. He welcomed Jason's weight over him, the feel of Jason's heated skin against his, the hot kisses Jason trailed on his chest. He closed his eyes and arched into Jason's mouth when Jason sucked on his nipples. His cock was hard and weeping against Jason's stomach. Every cell in his body rejoicing as Jason showered him with urgent caresses. There was no pain, no discomfort just pleasure, flooding his senses until he couldn't catch his breath.

"Jason," he hissed when Jason took him into his mouth.

Jason swiped his tongue over the head of his cock and proceeded to pull back to lick the tip. His breath left his lungs, his cock jerked with the fiery sensations shooting through it. His hand fisted in Jason's hair, moving his hips in small almost helpless thrusts, wanting to push his cock deeper into Jason's scalding heat. His moans increased as Jason sucked him, driving him to a wrenching climax that had him screaming and arching his hips into Jason's mouth. He came so hard; it felt like he was experiencing pleasure for the first time in his life. Burning heat, so delicious it coursed through his body, he could only close his eyes and savor it.

Jason moved up his body, and took his mouth in a desperate kiss. He tasted himself, and Jason's warmth.

Toshiro wrapped his arms around Jason, needing more, desperate for it. Again and again, Jason dragged him into a world of hot silk, decadent pleasure and need. He felt on fire. His fingers dug into firm sinewy muscles, caressing Jason's sweaty skin. When Jason moved away from him, he protested with a frustrated moan.

Jason urged him onto his stomach and then to his knees. He closed his eyes when he felt Jason press a kiss on the small of his back. Then, his world changed when Jason licked his puckered opening. His cock hardened instantly at the feel of Jason's lips against him, Jason's tongue sliding into him made him dig his fingers into the carpet and when he was ready, the feel of Jason's thick cock sliding into him had him moaning with need.

Thoughts faded, pleasure took over, each measured withdrawal made him whimper, each time his skin slapped against Jason as he bucked into him made him cry out for more. Jason stretched over his back and he felt Jason's mouth on his neck. Felt Jason suck on sensitive skin hard, it brought him closer to his climax. So close, he arched into Jason's thrusts, wanting more, needing more, everything...gods...he was going crazy. Jason was going to kill him with ecstasy.

"Ah, God, yes," Jason said harshly thrusting into him harder and then he ejaculated, forcefully, pumping his seed so hotly, Toshi felt it deep inside.

He felt complete, Jason's hold was tight as he kept coming, but it wasn't punishing. It was possessive, demanding he give in, give himself up too. He closed his eyes as he came again, for the first time in his life, he held nothing of himself back as he came with a harsh cry.

He woke up to find Jason lying on his left side, head propped up as he studied him.

"Hey," Jason said, his green eyes full of concern in the warm light from the lamps.

Toshiro smiled and shifted on the carpet to get more comfortable. He touched the cushion under his head.

"You fell asleep. I didn't want to wake you," Jason said. "Did I hurt you?"

Toshiro shook his head. "No."

"Are you sure?" Jason asked leaning closer to look into his eyes.

Toshiro lifted his head and captured Jason's lips in a sweet kiss. Jason moaned and moved closer. He broke the kiss and murmured against Jason's lips.

"I'm sure, Jason."

He lay back and Jason shifted even closer. Content to lay in silence, Toshiro turned on to his stomach, his arms folded on the pillow. He closed his eyes as Jason dusted kisses over his shoulder.

***

Jason traced the white scars on Toshiro's back. He didn't want to imagine the pain Toshi had endured. Scars upon scars, faded ones, permanent ones, new ones, he leaned and pressed kisses on them.

Toshiro hissed as if burned, his body tense.

"What are you doing?" Toshiro asked lifting his head slightly.

"Replacing all these scars with new memories," Jason murmured against his skin. "If you stay with me, I'll keep you safe, Toshi."

Toshiro sighed.

"Jason."

His voice sounded rough, unsure.

"Please don't try to leave me anymore."

"I can't stay here for long," Toshiro said, his voice heavy with regret.

Jason slid his fingers into black silky hair.

"Enough with this topic, you're not leaving, period. I don't care who comes looking for you. I'm not letting you go."

***

The next morning, Toshiro lay on his side on the rug in the great room watching Jason sleep. The rain had stopped; the sun was coming up in the horizon. They'd spent their night right here on this rug, with Jason taking him over, until it felt like there was no place else for him but here.

Sunlight broke through the windows, warming Jason's pale skin. Moving closer, he traced the curve of Jason's hip with his left hand. Clean smooth skin, unlike his. He closed his eyes remembering Jason kissing the scars on his back. He'd wanted to cry at the gentle caresses.

"Morning."

His eyes flew open and he met smiling green eyes. Jason's blond hair tousled to perfection, stubble dusted his chin. Toshiro leaned to kiss him just to feel it against his own skin.

"Morning," he said against Jason's lips, smiling when Jason pushed him to his back and lay over him.

Jason pushed his hair back.

"Your eyes are so beautiful."

Toshiro chuckled, running his hands over Jason's back.

"Men are not beautiful."

"You are," Jason said as he pressed his hard cock against Toshiro's aching one. A soft gasp escaped Toshiro's lips and Jason kissed him again. "You're beautiful to me."

Toshiro combed his fingers through Jason's shaggy blond hair. The soft strands curling through his fingers.

"I don't know how to say no to you."

Jason grinned; his green eyes the color of jade.

"I think its better that you don't learn how. Otherwise, you'd pack a bag and leave me alone again."

Toshiro frowned.

"I should leave, Jason, if only to keep you safe."

"I don't want to be safe."

Toshiro sighed when Jason trailed kisses along his jaw, his neck, pausing to suck on the curve of his shoulder. His fingers tightened in Jason's hair when that talented mouth moved to his chest, licking and biting his left nipple, then his right. All logical thoughts disappeared under Jason's assault. Wrapping his arms around Jason, he gave up trying to be reasonable, and thinking of the right thing to do.

Jason's warmth, how could he give it up when it was the purest thing he'd ever had in his life? When Jason kissed him again, he gave up thinking at all.

***

_This was heaven_ , Jason thought watching Toshiro sort beads on the floor under his worktable.

Dark silky hair held in a low messy ponytail, a few strands escaping to frame Toshiro's face. He smiled knowing that he could walk over and sweep his fingers through that hair, and have Toshiro tilt his head back for a kiss.

Heaven wrapped up in a fit, handsome and beautiful man with a dark past.

They'd spent a little over a month getting to know each other. After that first day, he and Toshiro had decided not to talk about the future, or the past for the matter.

They preferred living day to day, as though nothing mattered beyond the Watson property. They'd explored the woods around the property: Jason had found bicycles in the garage and coaxed Toshiro into riding with him around the property.

When they weren't in the woods or riding, they went fishing. He'd found Toshiro knew more about fishing than he'd let on when the younger man won their contest of who could get more fish.

Jason had driven them back to shore in a huff, and had enjoyed having Toshiro cajole him out of his huff by cooking him a great fish dinner.

They made love, spending hours exploring each other. He loved Toshiro's body, loved how Toshiro responded to him. He'd tried to get Toshiro to talk about the scars on his back, but every time he asked, Toshiro distracted him with kisses that usually led to more scorching sex.

Six glorious weeks of waking up next to Toshiro, making love with him, watching him relax, and let down his guard. He wanted to keep it this way forever.

Sadly, the Watsons were due on Friday.

Their precious time alone was ending. He had two more days with Toshiro here and then they'd go to his loft. A thrill went through him as he realized he was eager to fill his own space with Toshiro memories. He looked forward to making love to Toshiro on his own bed. Just imagining Toshiro, body arched in ecstasy, his head thrown back with a silent moan, Jason's cock hardened and he grinned. His thoughts strayed to the reason why Toshiro was sorting through beads on the floor.

Toshiro had walked into the workroom with a lunch tray, and found him adding beads to a silver wire. Having Toshiro's stand so close had been too much.

Jason had abandoned the beads, and reached for Toshiro. Kissing and pushing him on the table, they'd stripped in a hurry, knocking over containers of beads in their haste. Toshiro's pleas urgent as they explored each other, his cock hardened, at the memory of the needy gasp Toshiro had given when he'd entered him. He'd taken Toshiro with urgency, bending him over the table and pounding into him until they both came with harsh gasps.

"Stop fantasizing and come help me," Toshiro said dumping a handful of red beads in to their container. "We're lucky they're not those tiny ones you were using yesterday."

Jason picked up the container of green beads and took it with him under the table. He crouched beside Toshiro and picked green beads from the floor.

"I don't think I'll ever look at a worktable without thinking of you urging me to take you harder. Should we go again?" Jason teased as he dumped the beads into their container.

Toshiro bumped his shoulder.

"You're insatiable. I don't think that's advisable in here," Toshiro teased looking around the workroom. "When are you going to take back all these supplies to your loft? Don't we have to move next week?"

"Yep," Jason said with a sigh. "I almost don't want to leave."

"Why?" Toshiro asked sitting on the floor and crossing his legs under him.

Jason smiled.

"I have you all to myself here. We're in a world of our own, nothing to worry about, and no one to bother us."

Silence filled the room and he glanced up to find Toshiro watching him.

"What?'

"I wish we could stay here too."

Toshiro dropped the beads in his hand into a container.

Jason touched Toshiro's jaw.

"Don't wear such a sad face. Leaving is good for us. I want to show you my house, see you in my space, watch you cook in my kitchen. So, it's good we're moving back to my loft."

Toshiro smiled.

"You're taking advantage of me. You promised me pancakes in bed when I was in the hospital. What happened to that?"

Jason grinned.

"It will come as a surprise, although it's hard to surprise you. You wake up so early."

"I'll stay in bed if you tell me."

"Will you stay in my life forever if I ask you?" he asked studying Toshiro.

Toshiro lifted his head in surprise.

"Jason."

Those honeyed eyes were full of shadows that he wished he could dispel.

Jason sighed.

"I'm sorry. I know the future is off limits. But, if you had a choice, would you stay, Toshi?"

"In a heartbeat," Toshiro answered.

His heart skipped and he couldn't stop grinning. Toshiro continued picking beads and he closed his eyes asking the fates for this one miracle.

To please, please, please, allow Toshiro to be his forever.

***

Nightmares woke Toshiro again.

Toshiro sat up on Jason's bed, wishing he could exorcise his entire life except the last month and a half. Watching Jason sleep beside him, the wishes threatened to choke him.

His weakness wasn't helping either of them. He'd put off contacting Agent Baron for two weeks now, he hadn't even checked his email; instead he'd spent his time losing himself in a dream.

Touching Jason's hair, he smiled. This was a dream he never wanted to leave.

Gods, what was he going to do once they moved back to town?

Out here in the woods, he could keep pretending everything was okay. In town, there was the nosy detective, not to mention Kaito could have men there looking for him. They'd have realized he hadn't gone back to Tokyo by now.

Wiping a hand down his face, he slid out of bed. He pulled the covers over Jason, wore sweat pants he'd draped on an armchair earlier and left their room.

He headed to the guest room Jason had given him first. Finding his duffel bag, he got his laptop, his gaze falling on a black cloth at the bottom of the bag. Pushing his t-shirts over the bundle to hide it better, he dropped the bag on the floor and moved to sit on the bed.

He turned on the laptop with a sigh to check his email. He found one new message in his in-box from Agent Baron sent a week ago.

Toshiro,

Kaito arrested at JFK. He might be in custody, but you need to be careful. Someone working for him is looking for information about you in my office. I'll send you a message when it's safe to meet.

Baron

Deleting the message, Toshiro pushed the laptop to the side on the bed and dropped his face into his hands. Kaito looking for him meant he knew that Toshiro wasn't in Japan. His hands shook and he stared at them in shock. His chest tightened and it suddenly got harder to breathe. Clenching his fists, he closed his eyes and took in deep gulps of air. This was not the time to panic.

It's not the time, Toshiro.

Taking in another deep breath, he consoled himself with the fact that he hadn't actually told Baron where he was going. Kaito wouldn't know either, and would look for him in New York City.

That's right; Kaito's men would rough up everyone he'd talked to in the past four years. Every shop he'd visited, every restaurant, which would take time.

Unless they found whatever gadget, Baron had used to send him the message. He glanced at his laptop, panic flooding him again. What if they had found Baron's phone or laptop after all he hadn't gotten another message in a week.

Kaito had Pakino, the computer genius with a hard on for puzzles. Toshiro sighed and stared at the laptop. There was a possibility of Pakino tracking him to this location. He winced at the thought of them finding Jason.

Jumping off the bed, he grabbed the laptop and left his bedroom going to the kitchen. Without switching on the lights, he opened the cupboard under the sink and got a can of gasoline. Taking matches from a basket on the counter, he went out on the deck and opened the grill.

Placing the laptop on the grill, he doused it with gasoline, and lit a match. He dropped the match on the laptop and watched it burn with a grim look.

***

"Agent Baron," Suni Pakino said with a smile. "You should have cooperated with me, and then I wouldn't have to break into your house."

"Stop mumbling to yourself, and tell me we've found him."

"You're an ass, Taki," Pakino grumbled as he studied the map on his laptop. "It wasn't easy you know, what with the good agent hiding his laptop in the floorboards under his bed. What an idiot."

"He's not coming home tonight." Taki looked out the kitchen window. "He's busy interrogating the boss. We need to get to Shindo."

"Stupid Shindo," Pakino said frowning at the map on his laptop. "I liked him, you know. I really thought he'd end up running the organization."

"Just find him. I want to teach him a lesson," Taki said. "Do you have it yet?"

"One sec, jeez, you're so impatient. No wonder no one wants to be sent out with you, Taki."

Pakino sighed.

"Shindo is smart, but not smart enough. Doesn't he know the best place to hide is a big city. Little towns are so easy," Pakino scoffed.

"Where is he?" Taki abandoned his post at the kitchen windows to come lean over him. "Is that a lake?"

"Yeah," Pakino grinned. "Lake Keuka in Penn Yan, NY, he's probably staying at Warren Carrey's lake house since the man returned to Newark to be close with the family. I told you people Toshiro was smart. Everyone is searching for him in Tokyo, while he's been living comfortably."

Pakino burst out laughing and Taki smacked him on the head.

"Why are you guessing his exact location?"

"The signal disappeared." Pakino pointed to the screen. "All I know is that he's in Penn Yan. It's your job to find out where; I've given you a small place to look. Gods, I really miss Shindo. You're an idiot, Taki."

Taki glared at him.

"Keep missing him and you might end up dead like him, Pakino. Pack up, we're leaving, this is going to be a long day."

***

Michael Baron walked into his house in the morning, tired from a night without sleep. Kaito Takumi was one tough nut to crack. Kaito hadn't spoken one word since they'd arrested him two weeks ago. Last night, when they'd found another one of Kaito's men dead, Michael had spent the whole night trying to get Kaito to talk to him. He stopped at the kitchen door when he switched on the light and saw the black laptop sitting on his kitchen table.

He instantly flattened against the wall, got his gun in one practiced move and reached for his cell phone with his left hand. Dialing his partner, he peeked into the kitchen, hoping not to find anyone waiting.

"I thought you were going to bed?" Gene Hughes answered with a yawn.

"They were in my house," Michael said staring at the laptop he'd kept under his bed upstairs. "You better get here. Toshiro Shindo is in trouble."

***

"This list you wrote is illegible," Toshiro complained into Jason's cell phone. "You should have been a doctor. You write worse than chicken scratch."

He smiled at the sound of Jason laughing on the other end.

"What can't you read, my love?"

"Do you have to call me that?" Toshiro asked as he moved the cart along the aisle.

"Yes, don't you like it?"

Truthfully, he liked it when Jason called him those endearing words. Babe, love, sweetheart, they were so corny, but he loved hearing them.

"You're too much," Toshiro said with a smile. "What is canberry, and why do you want sixteen bottles?"

Jason laughed again.

"Cranberry juice and I want six bottles."

Toshiro stared at the list again.

"My goodness, no one can figure that out looking at this list. Just stay on the phone and tell me what you want me to buy."

"So touchy," Jason teased on the other end. "I'm busy, you know. All these boxes won't pack themselves."

"How do you know what the Watsons want in their pantry?" Toshiro asked as he got the bottles of juice and put them in the cart.

"She emailed me a list last night. Toshi, since we're going to be in town tonight, how about I take you out for dinner?"

"Are you tired of my cooking?" Toshiro teased moving his cart along to the next aisle. The next item on his list read as whole Mike, but he decided it was whole milk. "How many cartons of milk do you want?"

"Two," Jason said. "No, I'm not tired of your cooking, babe. I want to do something nice for you. Hey, Sean is calling; hold on a bit, okay?"

"Sure," Toshiro stopped along the dairy aisle and opened the fridge doors to get whole milk.

Taking two cartons, he froze when he saw the reflection of a man dressed in black behind him. Turning around fast, he frowned when there was only an old woman pushing her cart toward him.

Fighting back panic, Toshiro took in a deep breath and let it out. He could have sworn he'd seen Pakino.

***

"What time do you think you'll get here?"

"In the next two hours," Jason said sweeping the workroom floor.

The shelves were empty, boxes lining the entrance, ready to go when Toshiro came back.

"I'm excited to show Toshi my house."

"Jeez, is this the Jason I know?" Sean asked on the other end.

Jason could almost picture Sean rolling his eyes in disbelief.

"Keep acting like that and I might come there and smack you."

"Yeah, yeah," Sean laughed. "I'll be at the shop."

"Thanks, Sean."

Jason placed his phone on the table and moved to get the dustpan. The door opened and he glanced up with a ready smile.

"Toshi—"

His next words froze in his throat when he saw the two men that walked in. Dropping the dustpan and broom, he raised his hands in the air at the sight of the guns trained on him.

***

Putting the milk in the cart, Toshiro shoved the phone into his pocket and closed the refrigerator. He continued walking along the aisle, paying more attention to the people around him.

He couldn't shake off the feeling of that someone followed him. By the time he finished shopping, every cell in his body told him to rush back to Jason.

He paid for the groceries, left the supermarket and ran to Jason's Range Rover. Dumping the groceries in the back passenger seat, he pushed the cart to the side of his parking space and entered the driver's side.

Jason hadn't called him back.

Shoving his key into the starter, he got his cell phone and dialed the Watson house phone. When there was no answer, he started the car and drove out of the parking lot at full speed.

It took him fifteen minutes to get to the Watson House. Fifteen minutes, in which he called Jason a dozen times, getting frantic when Jason didn't answer. He tore into the front drive, parking the car haphazardly and jumped out of the car.

"Jason!"

He ran into the house through the front door checking every room he passed. Fear filled him, as visions of Jason in Takumi's hands filled his head. Everything seemed the same, but there was no Jason. He ran to his bedroom and got the duffel bag he'd thrown in the corner.

He was an idiot to have thought he was safe here. An idiot, a stupid ass, he shook his head as he pulled out the black cloth at the bottom of the bag. He pulled out a pair of daggers, taking them to the bed; he knelt on the carpet and reached under the bed to get the gun he'd hidden under the mattress. He checked his ammunition, shoved the daggers into pockets on the inside of his boots, and left his bedroom.

He made for the kitchen and the backdoor, praying Jason was working in the workroom untouched.

Gods, he was going to feel so stupid if this was just paranoia.

Outside, pressed against the side of the house, Toshiro frowned at the workroom door. There was no one outside, but that didn't mean there weren't people. He felt tense with alarm, sure that what he'd seen in the supermarket wasn't a hallucination.

Pakino was a psychopathic maniac who liked to play games.

Toshiro crept to the garage wall, making his way to the open workroom door. His gun held against his right side, he peeped into the workroom, hoping to see Jason alone. Air shifted behind him and he closed his eyes when the tip of a blade pressed into his neck.

***

Chapter 7

Toshi grabbed the wrist holding the knife against his neck. He ignored the painful cut on his neck, turned and pressed his gun into his assailant's thigh. He took two shots, the man dropped to his knees and Toshiro kicked him on the head.

The bastard fell back to the ground with a painful groan.

Toshiro kicked the workroom door open and rushed in.

"Jason!"

The room was empty.

" _Jason_ ," he whispered.

He turned back to the man groaning on the ground. Falling on his knees, Toshiro grabbed the man's collar and took the knife the man had used on him. He pressed it against the bastard's neck.

"Where did they take him?" he asked his voice raw with anger. "Where is he?"

The man he held stared at him blankly. Impatience had Toshiro pressing the sharp knife deeper into the man's skin until he drew blood.

"Talk or you're dead."

"The dock," the man said.

Toshiro knocked him out with his gun and searched his pockets. He found two guns, a wallet and cell phone. Checking the guns, he slipped them in the waistband of his pants at the small of his back, grabbed his assailant's knife and cell phone. He stood up and raced to the tree line.

Toshiro ran through the trees, staying away from the main path, navigating wayward branches, and boulders, his thoughts on Jason. Sweet Jason who'd shown him nothing but kindness. He jumped over a fallen tree and prayed to God that Jason was fine. Swiping a branch out of his face, he came to an abrupt stop when he reached the clearing to the dock.

He flattened himself against a large tree and stared at the boat waiting there. There was one man standing on deck, five men stood scattered close to a short woman crouched on the grass by the dock. The men held guns, their gazes sweeping the tree line. She was talking, and they seemed preoccupied with what she was saying.

The woman straightened up, and he frowned.

It was Sakura, elegant in grey slacks and a silk blouse. She'd been crouched over... _Jason!_

Toshiro clenched his fists at the sight of Jason kneeling on the grass, his hands tied behind him and a black hood over his head.

Toshiro took in a deep breath, fighting the urge to run out to Jason. It took a few seconds; he closed his eyes desperate, _desperate_ , for control.

The cell phone he'd taken from the man at the workroom buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out with a sigh. He answered the call and pressed the cell phone to his ear.

"Is he back? Bring him to the dock. Leverage the boyfriend's life," Sakura ordered curtly.

When he didn't answer her order, a soft chuckle came through.

" _Hisashiburi_ , Toshiro." _Long time no see._

Her tone was soft and friendly: disarming, but he knew her too well.

"I should have known one guard wouldn't be enough."

"Let him go," Toshiro said then in a tight voice. "I'll leave with you."

"Why should I do that?" Sakura asked. "No one knows what you've told him. Pillow talk is dangerous, Toshiro. You taught me that. We've built a business based on it."

Toshiro closed his eyes.

"You let him go, I'll come with you," he repeated.

His heart hammered when she remained silent. He shifted on the tree to study her from his hiding place. It was far enough that her guard wouldn't see him, but he could see her clearly. She stood staring at Jason. His breath caught when she grabbed the hood on Jason's head and tugged it off.

"What's so special about him?" she asked her voice dripping with irritation.

Toshiro swallowed as she lifted Jason's bruised face so that she could study him.

"He's not so special. I doubt anyone will miss him, but you Toshiro," Sakura said.

Her tone was hard. She wasn't going to let this go easily.

Toshiro closed his eyes. He had to protect Jason no matter what. There was only one way to get through to Sakura.

Toshiro trained his gun on the man standing on deck. He braced his feet and took the shot with cool accuracy. The man fell with a sharp groan.

He shifted from his tree, and moved to another. The men around Sakura trained their guns into the tree line, but he knew they wouldn't fire without sighting him. It would draw attention and that was something he was sure Sakura didn't want. Otherwise, she wouldn't have come through the dock.

He brought the cell phone to his ear.

"Let him go," Toshiro repeated, "and I'll come with you."

Sakura punched Jason in the stomach and Toshiro watched his boyfriend fall to the ground with a groan. Swallowing back his anger, he trained his gun on the five men who'd made a circle around Sakura. He chose one standing close to Sakura. His hand shook slightly, so the bullet lodged into the man's stomach.

Toshiro stayed put this time. His back pressed against the tree, he brought the cell phone back to his ear.

"You're next, and quit hurting him. You're angry with me. Let him go and I'll let you do what you want with me."

She growled into the phone.

"Come out!" she ordered.

He shifted to see her get a gun from the small of her back.

"You do it, or I shoot him."

"He dies, you die. Don't test me."

She stood staring at Jason for a moment then gave an exasperated sigh.

"I should have brought more men, and gotten you at night in your bed. Then I'd have killed him while you slept."

"He walks," Toshiro reiterated, refusing to think about anything but Jason's safety.

She hissed in annoyance. "Fine, you have a deal."

"Give your gun to the man standing next to you."

She lifted her head, scanning the tree line.

"I know you well, Sakura- _chan_ ," he said then. "Give your gun to the man beside you and have them walk to the water."

She hesitated and he shot-off a bullet into the grass right by her feet.

"Fuck you, Toshiro," she hissed into the phone and motioned her men to the edge of the water.

She took five steps away from Jason and threw her gun on the grass.

"What now?"

Taking Jason's cell phone from his pocket, Toshiro dialed Baron's number. When Baron answered on the other end, he took in a deep breath and emerged from the tree line. His gun trained on Sakura, he took quick strides, not daring to move his gaze from Sakura or her men.

"Jason," he said when he jumped over Jason's prone body. "Hey babe, answer me, please. Can you sit up?"

Jason groaned and rolled to his side.

"Toshi?"

"Sit up for me," he cajoled, moving so that his body shielded Jason.

"Toshi," Jason said, sitting up then. "Thank God, I thought they'd gotten you."

"Jason, get to your feet."

Holding his gun steady with his left hand, Toshiro got the knife he'd slid into his belt and waited until Jason stood. He had Jason turn so that he could cut off the rope bruising Jason's wrists. When Jason was free, Toshiro allowed himself to look at Jason then.

Sweet Jason, he smiled at the sight of Jason's green gaze on the men training guns at them. A deep frown creased Jason's forehead making him want to rub it away.

"It's going to be okay," Toshiro said gently, slipping Jason's cell phone into Jason's jeans pocket, "Like it never happened."

"Toshi," Jason said with a frown.

Toshiro took in Jason's face, wincing at the bruises on Jason's jaw, the cut on his lip. Jason remained the most beautiful person he'd ever met. In heart, in soul...he turned to meet Sakura's hard gaze.

He'd do what he needed to protect Jason.

"He lives, I won't fight you."

Toshiro dropped his gun and kicked it to her. Her men rushed to grab him and Jason panicked.

"No!" Jason said moving to stop them.

Sakura swept up her gun and turned to point it at Jason.

Toshiro struggled with the two men holding his arms.

"Sakura!"

"Please let Toshiro go," Jason begged, trying to fight off the men holding Toshiro. "Let him go!"

Sakura pressed her gun into Jason's left temple.

"He doesn't belong here," she said in heavily accented English. "Stop fighting for him if you want to live. You two, take Toshiro to the boat, and make sure he's not hiding any weapons. The rest of you get the injured men."

When Jason wouldn't stop, she slapped him across his jaw.

"You, stop! Otherwise, I change my mind and kill you."

The two men holding Toshiro didn't give him a chance to see Jason again. He hoped Baron was smart and would find Jason soon. He didn't trust Sakura and she could easily have her people return for Jason. The agent would know to protect Jason. It took less than a minute to get him on the boat, he couldn't bear to hear Jason shouting for him, but then they dumped him on the deck. One of Sakura's men stuck a needle into his neck, and he lost consciousness.

***

Cold water dumped over his head woke him up. He blinked water drops out of his eyes and hissed when harsh lights assaulted his eyes.

"You've been a bad boy, Toshiro." Suni Pakino's face appeared before him. "I saw your yummy lover. Are you playing house now?"

"I see you're still playing games. You were in the supermarket," Toshiro said in a bored tone.

He sat on a metal chair, his thighs cold against the metal.

"Not like you," Pakino said with a grin. "You, you're going to end up dead."

"Is that so?" Toshiro asked testing his limbs.

His legs were free, but they'd tied his arms behind him to the chair. He dropped his gaze to the wet black shorts he wore.

"Was this your idea?"

"Sakura- _chan_ knows you hide knives in your clothes." Pakino grinned. "She's upset by what you did earlier. You should have let her kill your man."

Toshiro moved his hands to test how tight the ropes were.

A door opened behind him and he heard two sets of footsteps walk in: Sakura's heels and a man's shoes. He grimaced when an arm slipped over his shoulders.

"Look at you," Taki said into his ear. Taki's breath unwelcome, he turned away to escape it. "I heard you were ready to lay down your life for some nobody. Is he the reason you betrayed the boss?"

"Kaito betrayed me first."

"You hurt the boss, you know. Talking to that FBI Agent has caused us unimaginable losses. If it were up to me, you'd be dead. I think we should kill you here, and forget you ever existed," Taki said with a small smile.

Toshiro ignored Taki's taunts. He'd always hated how petty Taki was, so jealous, and needy. He gritted his teeth when Taki stroked a finger down his left jaw.

"Is it true?" Taki asked, tugging the wisps of hair that had escaped the rubber band he used for his ponytail. "Are you really a Natake? It's unbelievable that the bastard Toshiro is a plutocrat's child. Who'd have imagined? Do you think they would accept a criminal like you?"

Taki scoffed.

"I always knew your arrogance came naturally. Natakes are so entitled. Your mother thinks she owns the world. What I'd do to show her who is boss—"

Toshiro turned then and head butted Taki. Taki growled, jumping away holding on to his nose. Taki rewarded him with a hard punch on his left jaw. Toshiro closed his eyes, temporarily dazed.

"I fucking want to kill you," Taki said savagely, pressing the muzzle of his gun into Toshiro's forehead.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Sakura said then. "Control yourself, Taki. Don't damage the goods just yet."

"But—" Taki started.

"We need him," Sakura snapped.

Taki grumbled under his breath and moved away.

Toshiro moved his jaw to ease the ache before he spoke.

"Sakura, are you doing petty errands now?"

"You're special, Toshiro," she said. "You should have died in the woods. This is not going to get easier for you."

Toshiro met her gaze and read his fate in her eyes. He'd live long enough to get them access to the accounts he'd locked when he'd decided to talk to Agent Baron.

"How could you do this?" Sakura demanded of him. "If you were unhappy, you should have come to me."

Toshiro chuckled.

"I didn't know you cared so much."

He hissed when she punched his left jaw too.

"Stop that, you're pissing me off."

"What? Don't want me to ruin your handsome face?" Sakura taunted. "Is it because of your sweet little boyfriend? I should have killed him."

"I'd have killed you. Then gone after everyone you've ever saved, Sakura. I know what you've done for the women Kaito wanted dead in your whorehouse."

She narrowed her gaze.

"You've grown a pair since I last saw you. What happened to you?"

"Got stabbed and was left for dead," Toshiro smiled at her. "Why don't you let me go? Tell them you didn't find me."

Sakura studied him for a moment before she paced away. Taki and Pakino had retreated to a desk by the wall.

"What are you going to do with me?" he asked.

"Take you to Manhattan, get our money, and then ship you home. They'll release Kaito as soon as you don't show up to make a formal statement. He'll deal with you."

She glanced at him pensively.

"You've ruined a lot of plans by doing this, Toshiro."

"Good," Toshiro said with satisfaction.

Sakura scowled.

"You've lost your mind. Don't you care if you live or die?"

Toshiro thought about Jason. He wanted to see Jason again, sit out on the lake with him. He wanted to see Jason's loft, watch him work in his shop. Instead, here he sat, about to die...again.

They would ship him out to Tokyo, as though he didn't have a say in his life. He dropped his gaze to the floor and sighed.

It _was really_ time to make a choice, whether he wanted to live or die...

***

Jason ran back to the Watson House, his heart pounding with fear, the sight of Toshiro disappearing in the boat the only thing in his thoughts.

Good God, what was he supposed to do?

_Toshiro,_ he slowed down.

What had Toshiro meant by ' _like it never happened?'_

Gods, surely Toshiro couldn't mean he was going back to Japan. Those people meant to kill him.

Jason's hip vibrated. He pulled out his cell phone and frowned. The number calling was blocked. He answered the call.

"Toshiro?"

"Who is this?"

"Agent Michael Baron, who am I talking to?"

"Jason Stone. They took him," Jason said turning to stare back at the empty dock. "They have him on a boat, heading south."

"Where are you?"

"Penn Yan, they're on Lake Keuka," Jason said starting toward the house. "I have to call police."

"Don't, I'll take care of it," Agent Baron said. "Toshiro called me, which means he needs you protected."

"What do you mean he wants me protected?" Jason asked as he raced toward the house. "Are you insane? _Toshiro_ needs saving. Stop worrying about me and think about Toshi. He needs our help—"

"Mr. Stone," Agent Baron snapped.

"What?"

"You and I can't trust anyone. Toshiro's life depends on it. Do you understand?"

Jason paused right outside the house.

"How can I trust you? How do I know you're not the one who sold him out?"

"Because he called me," Agent Baron said. "All I know is if you stay there, they'll come back for you. So, shelve your trust issues, pack a bag and do what I tell you, Mr. Stone. I, at least, don't want you dead. Trust in that."

***

Toshiro sneezed, bringing his elbows up to wipe his nose on the white sweater Sakura had handed him to wear. Stupid Pakino, he'd poured water on him and refused to let him dry his hair. Moving his jaw to unblock his ears, he shifted on his feet, his gaze on the apartment building across the street.

It was early in the morning. Sakura had flown him into New York City and spent the night grilling him about the organizations accounts. He'd shared very basic information. She'd gotten angry with him and gotten her men to express her frustration on him. Toshiro shifted and sighed when his ribs protested any movement.

He worried for Jason...worried Sakura had sent men after Jason. Twenty-six hours ago, he'd been happy, now—

His gaze moved over the wide windows on the seventh floor across the street. His hopes hinged on a stupid plan that could get him killed.

"Are you sure this is where we need to be?" Pakino asked him. "If it isn't, Sakura is going to take it out on you again. You won't like it anymore than you like your bruised ribs."

Toshiro shrugged.

"What is she going to do, kill me?"

Pakino placed a coat over the cuffs on Toshiro's wrists.

"Don't make a fuss. Things are tense right now, what with the boss in FBI custody. Tempers are high, Toshiro. Give her the money and she'll let you live long enough to get back to Japan."

"I'll die when I give her the money," Toshiro said still watching the seven-floor apartment building across the street. "I don't want to go back to Japan."

"Then that's the price you get to pay for betraying the boss," Pakino said meanly.

Toshiro slid his gaze to Pakino.

"You know if you weren't such an asshole, I'd like you."

"I like you anyway." Pakino grinned at him. "I'd have followed your leadership, if you hadn't decided to go rogue."

Sakura came out of the black car parked on the curb, followed by Taki. She'd changed into a black dress and heels. He hid a smile at the thought of the steep staircase she had to climb to get to the seventh floor.

"Time to go, Toshiro," she snapped. "I hope this isn't a game."

He gritted his teeth when Taki grabbed his right arm, and unnecessarily pushed him onto the street. He narrowly missed an oncoming car, and the ensuing honk had Taki laughing. Toshiro stepped back to allow the car to pass ignoring Taki's stupid antics.

They crossed the street without further incident.

Toshiro led the way into the building, pausing to punch in the front door code. He ignored the elevators and started up the stairs.

"Which floor?" Sakura demanded.

"Seventh," he said with a smile.

Sakura ignored his smirk and followed him with Pakino walking in front of him. They'd given him back his boots, his daggers still intact. Whomever they'd tasked to check his boots for weapons had obviously missed the sheaths he'd sewn into the leather. The steel handles looked like part of the boot. With his hands in cuffs and Sakura's men surrounding him, he still was at a disadvantage.

Nevertheless, he'd made a decision through the past few hours.

He meant to live, he wanted a life with Jason, wanted to sit out on the lake with him and argue over fishing...yes, he'd found his place. No one was going to take that away from him.

Now all he needed was a distraction.

***

**Chapter 8**

"Jason, answer my question," Michael Baron said.

"I don't understand why you've spent the past four hours asking me questions. You're the one at fault here. Why didn't you protect him? Toshiro came to _you_ for protection!"

Jason glared at the older man, tired of this senseless roundabout discussion. Twenty-five hours ago, he'd happily let Toshiro go to the grocery store, gods, maybe this was his fault.

If he'd just—

He scowled, just what?

He couldn't even fight against the men who'd taken him to the dock.

Shit!

Jason rubbed his eyes and leaned on the table in the small dreary room. Michael Baron had no idea where they'd taken Toshiro. He'd hoped the man had a clue. At least then, there was hope of getting Toshiro before those bastards shipped him out of the country.

Stupid FBI Agent Michael Baron didn't know where they'd have stashed Toshiro.

Baron had asked him to leave Penn Yan as if he was going on a short trip. Barely able to curb his anxiety, he'd locked up the Watson house and driven into town. He'd given Sean a silly story about dropping Toshiro off at the airport. Sean had stared at him with a frown, but Jason hadn't cared.

Jason drove out of Penn Yan as fast as he could. The agent had urged him to drive to New York City, check into a hotel and wait for him. His imagination had gone into overdrive through the whole ride into Manhattan. Just thinking about Toshiro dead had him shaking like a leaf. He'd spent the night in a hotel, barely able to close his eyes. When he finally met Agent Baron, he'd felt hope that the man was going to take him straight to Toshiro. His hopes disappeared the moment Agent Baron picked him up and brought him into the small tiny room in this warehouse.

When Jason asked why they weren't at the police station, Baron had said they were too many curious people. The two men working with Agent Baron brought him coffee and then this endless interrogation had started.

Jason worried.

Worried because they were asking _him_ if Toshiro had another apartment in the city, which meant they had no clue where to find Toshiro.

"What are we doing?"

Jason stared at Michael with bleary eyes.

"We're wasting time here. Shouldn't you have people on the streets, looking for any clue?"

Michael chuckled.

"I wish I lived in your shiny world. What kind of budget do you think we're running on?"

"You're FBI."

"Yeah, and Toshiro is really a criminal in the first place." Michael leaned on the table and folded his arms against his chest. "You and Toshiro spent one month and two weeks together. Let's go over everything he told you."

"You're treating me like a suspect. Do you think I'd hurt Toshiro?"

"Cooperate, Jason."

Jason glared at Michael but it didn't seem to have an impact. The bastard leaned on the table looking relaxed and untouched. His tie still in place, as though they hadn't spent hours in this stupid room, how did Michael stay so untouched?

"What is the question exactly?" Jason asked

"What did Toshiro tell you about his life?"

"He's a student at Columbia, MBA, he's graduating soon. I'm proud of him for that. Do you know he's really good with numbers," Jason smiled. "If you can find him, I want him working in my store."

"From what I've heard you want him working in your bed too," Michael shot back.

"Fuck you," Jason said with a scowl. "You're wasting time, you know."

"I'm not," Michael said then. "Toshiro trusted you. Did you talk about what he'd do if they came for him?"

Jason stared at Michael at a loss. He could barely remember anything but the fear and helplessness because that bitch who'd taken Toshiro had scared him. The way she'd looked at him, her...eyes. She was dead inside.

"I'd tell you if I knew anything, Agent Baron. If giving up my life meant I could save Toshiro from that bitch, I'd give it to you. We never talked about the future so...I never pushed. I know I should have, but—"

Jason shook his head in defeat.

Why hadn't he pushed?

"Family?" Michael asked.

"Family..."

Jason frowned. Goodness, did he know so little about Toshiro? He'd been too wrapped up in the physical stuff and how Toshiro made him feel.

Why hadn't he thought to ask more about Toshiro?

Granted Toshiro rarely talked about himself except that first time they'd made love. That night—

"Jason?"

Jason lifted his head remembering a conversation on a rainy night.

"Natake. He said he was a Natake and that Kaito Takumi's family abducted him. I don't know if that helps."

Michael nodded his gaze thoughtful.

"Anything else?"

"What do you mean anything else? I've told you what he likes to eat, how long he sleeps, what he wears...where he lived—

"Where did he live?" Michael asked again.

"The same apartment you've talked about. You said your people are watching it. Since he's not there—, or hasn't—

"Give me the address, Jason," Michael insisted. "I want to compare it to what we have. Maybe our addresses don't match."

"I don't know the exact address. He said it was on the seventh floor, like a loft or something..."

Michael frowned.

"He lives in a small apartment with two bedrooms."

Jason shook his head.

"No, it's a floor length apartment on Broome Street. He renovated it himself, something about being able to do his work without too many questions."

"What else?" Michael asked sharply. "About that building, did he say anything else?"

"Uhm..." Jason frowned.

Toshiro had told him about that apartment a week ago when they'd discussed returning to Jason's loft. They'd been lying on the bed, enjoying a lazy Sunday morning. Toshiro lying back on the pillows, his hair spilled around his head like a dark cloud. So handsome...Jason had sunk his fingers into it, just to feel the texture. He'd wanted to see Toshiro in his space at that moment...his loft, becoming their loft.

"I have a space of my own too," Toshiro confessed with a soft sigh. "It was a place where I could be myself. I wish I could take you there with me. There's a bakery across the street that sells the best croissants on earth. I think you'd love them too."

"There is a bakery across the building," Jason told Michael now. "He liked the croissants there. He thought I'd like them."

Michael smiled then.

"See, I told you this wasn't a waste of time."

Jason frowned as the men at the door got on their cell phones. After four hours of nothing but talk...he shook his head as Michael urged him to his feet.

"Time to go," Michael said.

***

Finding the building wasn't difficult.

The waiting around in the back of an SUV almost drove Jason crazy. Michael was sure Toshiro was headed to the apartment.

Michael sent in two men to check if there was anyone in the apartment. When they'd found no one, the agents decided to wait.

Jason clenched his hands on his lap and tried not to sigh in frustration. The two men seated in the front kept sending him irritated glances. Michael talked non-stop on his cell phone to his unseen boss.

Jason sighed and earned himself a pair of irritated glances. The loud honking of a car drew his gaze to a group of men standing by the curb right across the building.

Jason gasped when he recognized the man who'd almost been hit by a car.

"Oh my God, there's Toshiro!"

Jason reached for the door handle.

Michael grabbed his arm and tugged him back into the backseat.

"Don't get out."

Michael spared him an irritated glare before he continued to talk into his cell phone.

Jason watched Toshiro cross the street, his chest tight. Five men and that woman from yesterday surrounded his boyfriend. Toshiro moved carefully, as though he was in pain. He looked so lonely. Jason grabbed the door handle again.

"Don't." Michael warned tightening his hold on Jason's arm. "We have to let this play out. Toshiro told you about this place for a reason."

Jason shook his head. He didn't care about reasons, or the stupid FBI. His boyfriend was in trouble, and alone. How could he just watch from here?

How could he?

His hand moved away from the door handle and Michael returned to his conversation. The two men seated in the front of the car were watching the building Toshiro had gone into. Tugging his arm out of Michael's hold, Jason let a sigh escape and tried to stay still.

What were they doing in there?

He couldn't get the sight of Toshiro walking into the building out of his head. So lonely...he couldn't bear it.

Michael watched him as though Jason was going to jump out of the car. And God, did he want to...

***

In his loft, Toshiro gave Pakino the code into his house. His fists clenched, he allowed one of Sakura's men to walk him into the loft. He'd left the space wide open, no walls except for the bedroom in the furthest corner and the bathroom attached to it. Japanese screens divided the kitchen area. In the middle of the room, he'd created a workstation with a private server to help manage Takumi's organization.

Pakino clapped his hands in appreciation at the sight and hurried to the wide desk.

"Do you need the password?" Toshiro asked to distract himself.

His heart was beating wildly, his gaze gauging the distance to the windows. He needed one shot, just one.

"Are you trying to insult me?" Pakino asked.

Toshiro felt a sense of betrayal when Pakino accessed the system with no trouble. He'd paid a fortune for a secure network. Sakura watched him. She knew him too well. Her gaze searched his, looking for his hidden card. She smiled at him slightly and he shrugged.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" he asked, nodding to the closed doors in the farthest corner.

"No," Sakura shook her head.

He grinned.

"I have no problem doing it here. Wanna watch?"

Sakura scowled at him.

"You're disgusting."

"Seriously," he lifted his handcuffed hands with a jacket still over them. "What do you think I'll do? I need to go, Sakura- _chan_. Let me go to the bathroom."

She studied him warily. He shifted with impatience and her scowl deepened. She motioned the man who'd led him into the apartment.

"Take him; I don't want to smell anything nasty. Don't let him out of your sight."

Toshiro smiled and gave her a mocking bow. The man she'd ordered grabbed his arm roughly and pushed him toward the bedroom.

His guard left the bedroom door open, and nodded to the bathroom door. Toshiro moved his arms so that he dropped the coat on the carpet.

"Go on, don't stay too long."

Toshiro hurried to the bathroom, and moved to close the door.

"Leave the door open," his guard said.

"No way," Toshiro said pushing the door closed with his foot.

He grabbed a bottle of water from the bathroom counter, took off the cap and balanced the bottle on the rim of the toilet bowl. The resulting stream of water sounded like he was peeing. Leaning down, he grabbed the dagger handle on his left boot and tugged with force. Reaching for the one hidden in his right boot, he bumped his head on the bathroom counter and he groaned.

"Hey, hurry it up," his guard said.

Toshiro ignored the throbbing pain on his forehead and concentrated on making a plan. He couldn't use the daggers with his hands cuffed. He didn't have time to find something to pick the cuffs. The water ended and he glanced at the door.

"Yo!" the guard said in irritation. Toshiro heard him start toward the bathroom. "What are you doing in there?"

Toshiro climbed on top of the bathroom counter, flattening himself on the wall. The door swung open.

"What the hell—" the man started.

Toshiro jumped on his back, looping his arms over the man's neck. He wrapped his legs around the man's chest, and used all his strength to put him in a chokehold. Toshiro closed his eyes when the guard kept struggling, choking, barely able to make any sound, the man's fingers viciously digging into his arms; Toshiro ignored the scratches and tightened his arms around the man's neck.

Fuck, his ribs hurt like hell.

Toshiro clenched his teeth and held on tight, using all his strength, until the man staggered and started sinking to the ground. Toshiro jumped off him then and made sure the man fell to the tiled floor without too much noise. He stood still for a moment staring at the unconscious man, listening, when no one came running, he let out a soft breath. Crouching over his victim, he searched for the key. When he found the small key in the man's pockets, he paused long enough to open the cuffs and use them on the guard. Throwing the key into the toilet, Toshiro flushed it and grabbed his daggers.

Stepping out of the bedroom, Toshiro walked with purpose to the small group surrounding his computer station. The jacket over his wrists hid his daggers, every cell in his body trembled in anticipation.

"Where is Ando?" Sakura asked him, glancing up from where she was reading data on the screen.

"The bathroom," Toshiro shrugged. "He ordered me here with you coz he had to go."

Sakura nodded and returned her attention to the computer.

Toshiro stepped back dropping the jacket, and sunk his daggers into the man closest to him, pulled them out, he swung to the next man. His attack too abrupt, both men fell to the ground before the other two could reach for their guns.

Toshiro let his daggers go and grabbed a gun from one of the fallen men. He straightened and pressed the muzzle to Sakura's forehead.

"You're dead." Sakura hissed at him, her gaze hard as she met his gaze.

"So are you," he said, aware of the two men on the other side of the desk pointing guns at him.

***

Jason jumped out of the car when glass exploded and a body flew out of the top floor. His heart in his throat, he ran toward the red brick building. The man who'd jumped out seemed to be holding on to thin strip of wire. He stopped short when he realized it was Toshiro. The wire was short, and stopped on the third floor. Toshiro dangled in midair, with nothing but pavement below him, and then he was falling.

"No."

The cry came out raw. Jason rushed toward his boyfriend who fell on the pavement on his side. Blood thundering in his ears he ran to Toshiro's side, barely breathing. Kneeling on the pavement, he touched Toshiro's shoulder and rolled him to his back.

"Baby?"

Toshiro groaned and looked at him with pain-filled eyes. Relief flooded Jason so hard he gasped.

Thank God!

Toshiro was alive.

"We have to stop meeting like this," Toshiro joked with another painful groan. "I think I broke something this time."

"You idiot," Jason bent to kiss Toshiro only to be moved to the side and Toshiro stood abruptly. A pair of gunshots cut through the sound of sirens. Jason glanced up in time to see that woman who'd taken Toshiro fall out of the building.

Police surrounded them, Jason moved closer to Toshiro.

"I never wanted people pointing guns at you," Toshiro said turning to look at him. "I hope you forgive me."

"Drop the gun," one of the policemen ordered.

Toshiro dropped his gun, and instead of raising his arms, he started falling. Jason wrapped his arms around Toshiro fast and gasped when Toshiro pressed a hand to his left side.

There was blood, lots of blood...

"Oh God," Jason pressed his hand over Toshiro's bleeding stomach as they fell to the pavement. "Someone help! He's been shot, help us!"

Toshiro stared at him, his gorgeous brown eyes strangely peaceful.

"You came after me."

"I didn't even do anything. I'm so angry with you right now. Stop talking," Jason ordered, his hands pressed on Toshiro's stomach. There was so much blood, so much. "Why did you have to do this alone? You idiot, you should have waited. We were right outside."

Toshiro smiled; a tired tug of his lips.

"I'll do better next time."

"There is not going to be a next time." Jason shook his head. "You owe me your life, Toshiro. You owe me. You're moving in with me, and you're living a small town life, Toshiro Shindo."

"That sounds great," Toshiro reached up to touch his jaw. "I—

"Don't tell me now," Jason ordered harshly. "Tell me later."

"I'm so tired," Toshiro said, his hand dropping away, his fingers leaving bloodstains on Jason's jaw.

His eyes drooped.

Jason saw the paramedics rushing toward them.

"Fucking hurry," he screamed. "Toshiro, hang in there for me. Please, don't you let go. You hear me—"

***

Please.

Give him back to me.

Please, don't take him away from me.

I'll do anything.

I'll take anything but Toshiro gone.

Eyes swollen from lack of sleep and tears, Jason clutched Toshiro's hand, and willed his strength into him.

"Anything," he whispered.

Outside the ICU, a hoard of people waited, all of them wanted something from Toshiro. Jason didn't know them so he had refused to leave Toshiro's side.

_Oh God_ , his hold on Toshiro's hand tightened. _Please don't do this to me. I love him. Please, I love him. I love him! Give him to me. I'll take care of him. I promise._

Toshiro looked so still. His hair was a tangled mess, his skin pale. The doctor's explanation had sounded so complicated. Toshiro had lost a lot of blood. He had severely bruised ribs. His right arm was broken from his fall, and the gunshot had done more damage than the doctor liked. The pain was too much, so they'd put Toshiro in a drug-induced comma to manage his infection levels.

Jason didn't know much about medicine. He wished Keira were here, she'd explain it all better. She'd know what to say to make him understand what was going on inside Toshiro. Right now, all he saw was a bruised man in bed so lost to him, so far away Jason couldn't reach him.

Please God, I'm begging you. I'm really begging you...

How could he expect God to hear him? Jason sighed. He hadn't prayed since...jeez, he couldn't remember.

He stared at Toshiro's bruised fingers. So many scratches and bruises, he scowled when he noted the dirt under Toshiro's fingers. What were the nurses doing?

Jason shifted to reach for the nail cutter on the bedside table. He spent the next few minutes trimming Toshiro's nails. Removing any traces of dirt, rubbing his thumb over the curve of Toshiro's thumbnail, his gaze strayed to Toshiro's sleeping face.

"You have to wake up," he said. "I really want you to move in with me. Did you know I do all my books by hand? I bet you'd laugh at me for that. You have to make it better for me. I think you'd love that. You'll never have to worry about anything at the shop. It can be ours, together. I need you, Toshi."

He stopped and stared at Toshiro's still hand.

"I've never said that to anyone."

His eyes blurred. Placing the nail cutter on the bedside table, he dashed the tears away and returned to holding Toshiro's hand.

God, you listen to me. I know I haven't prayed in—well—never. But, I'm praying now. Toshiro, he's everything to me. So, keep him here with me, okay? You can't have him.

His heart clenched and he wished he were more faithful, more spiritual.

The door opened behind him and he refused to look up to see who else was here. He'd told Michael Baron to leave them alone.

"Jason?"

Sean's voice had him glancing up.

"Sean." He didn't want to let go of Toshiro's hand. "I didn't think you'd come—

"Of course I had to come." Sean moved closer and rubbed his back. "My God, what happened? The whole floor is flooded with police, FBI, a bunch of Japanese people. What's happening?"

"I don't know." Jason shook his head, not ready to deal with the outside. He didn't want to know what they all wanted from Toshiro. "I just need him to wake up. He's been out for three days, Sean. He's not waking up. The doctor keeps talking about infection."

Sean rubbed his back.

"When was the last time you slept?"

"I'm not leaving him."

"Jason—

"I'm not." Jason shook his head. "I can't."

"You need to," Sean urged. "You need sleep, you need food."

Jason shook his head, his hold on Toshiro's hand tightened.

"What if he wakes up?"

"I'll stay with him."

Jason was reluctant to leave Toshiro, half-afraid if he left, someone would take him away. Even with Sean watching, he shook his head unsure. When Sean patted his shoulder, Jason leaned his elbows on the bed and decided he couldn't leave Toshiro.

***

Chapter 9

" _You're dead," Sakura said._

" _So are you."_

Sakura's voice sounded far away. Unreal, yet it was so final. His body felt numb, stuck in one place.

"I wish you'd stop pointing guns at each other," Pakino said, drawing Toshiro's attention to the workstation. "I can't figure out these accounts with this ruckus."

Toshiro's gaze swept to the two men aiming guns at him. Taki seemed to have stepped out. He had minutes if that was the case, minutes to end this for good. The accounts Pakino was checking were basic. The balances pittances compared to the fortune they were looking for, but he had his own plans. Plans that would end the moment Pakino made his transaction.

Toshiro pressed the muzzle of his gun harder into Sakura's forehead and she hissed in annoyance.

"She'll be dead before you shoot," he warned the two men watching him. "Sakura, what are your priorities?"

The men across the desk stared at him, unmoving, their guns not wavering. Toshiro shifted, moving to put Sakura in between him and the two goons.

"I'm getting our money and killing you. I know you don't believe I'm helpless right now, Toshiro," Sakura said, studying him.

Her eyes were murderous. If she survived this, she was going to kill him without hesitation. She'd learned how to survive the same way he had, on Takumi's lap with no mercy to spare. Yeah, he was going to have a hard time putting her down.

Pakino gasped drawing her attention and Toshiro's heart slammed in his chest.

It was done.

"What did you do?" Pakino turned to look at him.

"What's wrong?" Sakura demanded glaring at the screen.

She ignored Toshiro's pointed gun, and he let her. Pakino had a spreadsheet filling the screen. A green strip at the bottom blinked at them.

"Did you find the money? Transfer it to the accounts I gave you."

Pakino turned his accusing gaze on Toshiro.

"You set me up."

Toshiro smiled.

"You were always too cocky."

Sakura grabbed Pakino's hair, her nails digging into his skull, she snarled.

"What is going on?"

"Hurting me won't help you."

Pakino reached up to ease Sakura's hold on his hair.

"Where is the money?" she asked digging her nails deeper.

Pakino hissed and glared at Toshiro.

"Ask him."

"What do you mean?"

"He played us. I thought I found the money in the accounts we found here. I was going to transfer it into the accounts you gave me, but—

"But what?" Sakura let go of Pakino's hair and turned to the screen. She stared at the blinking zeros in green. "What does that mean? Whose account is this?"

"Private banking is beautiful, isn't it?" Toshiro asked then stepping back again. "Kaito trusted me so much with multiplying his money. He never realized how deep I'd gone."

Sakura pointed to the screen again.

"Whose account Pakino?"

Pakino sighed and pushed his chair back.

"Don't kill me. I didn't do it. He did. The moment I logged on to this workstation, we were going to lose everything."

"Everything?" Sakura asked her voice tinged with anger. "What—

"The transfer I made turned into a reverse transaction. He must have set it up—"

"Set what up?" Sakura asked her voice rising. "Start making sense Pakino before I gouge out your eyes."

"He emptied all our accounts. All the accounts you gave me," Pakino said in a whisper. "He's taken everything."

Sakura moved so fast, Toshiro almost didn't see her coming. She grabbed his gun arm, her grip tight as she slammed into him. Her knee jerked up and he sidestepped her so that she hit his thigh. They stumbled back and he fell back on the wooden floor. She straddled his neck, holding his arm over his head. He threw the gun toward the windows, and grabbed Sakura's right wrist as she moved to slam the tip of her heel into his eye.

How she'd gotten to her shoe so fast, he had no clue. Damn it, her anger was making her strong. He lifted his legs hoping to dislodge her, but she tightened her knees on his neck holding him down.

"You're a bastard," she growled, her eyes filled with hatred. "What you've done to us—

"You deserve it."

He managed to dislodge her hold on his left arm.

Toshiro slammed his palm into her nose and she screamed. He pushed her off and scrambled to his feet. The two men started shooting and he moved to hide behind a leather couch. His gun was by the windows. Sakura groaned a few feet away on the floor.

"You're not getting out of here alive," Sakura promised him then. "Stop hiding and die with dignity, Toshiro."

Dignity be darned, he wanted to live. Toshiro stared at the windows ahead of him. He needed to live, for Jason. His legs felt frozen. He had to move, run to the windows and grab the wire he'd mounted on the wall for internet connection. It wasn't long enough but...he sighed. He'd just have to hope for the best.

"Toshiro," Sakura said too close to the couch.

Toshiro crouched and ran his hand under the leather couch. He almost despaired when all he felt was the smooth feel of leather. His fingers touched a cold handle and he smiled. He didn't have time to celebrate because the two men appeared to his right. He dragged the gun out and shot mindlessly. One fell back, the other shot into the couch right next to his head. Toshiro pushed off the couch and shot into the man's leg then ran for the windows.

Suddenly he was in the air, falling....falling...

There was nothing to stop his fall below him. A scream formed in the back of his throat, but even that wouldn't come out...

***

Jason swept strands of damp hair off Toshiro's forehead. He stared at the still face and wished that he could see Toshiro's brown eyes, those stunning brown orbs that left him breathless. He traced the curve of Toshiro's lips. When Toshiro smiled, his lips made this curve: a small slight curve that brightened Toshiro's face. Jason wished he could see it now.

He wished so much.

"Jason."

He glanced up to see Sean holding out a cup of coffee to him. He hadn't heard Sean come in. Taking the cup, he placed it on the bedside table.

"Did you sleep?" Sean asked.

He nodded to the cot in the corner. Sean had charmed the nurses into setting it up.

"A few hours," he said, returning his gaze to Toshiro. "The doctor said he should wake up today. They stopped drugging him. I don't know why he's not waking up."

"Give him time," Sean said. "I'm happy to see you at least changed. Did you eat breakfast?"

Jason shrugged. He was sure if he tried to eat, it would choke him. He sighed and reached for Toshiro's hand. He froze when he saw a finger move.

"Did you see that?"

Sean frowned. "It's just reflex."

"He's waking up," Jason said hope flaring. "Toshi?"

"It could be nothing," Sean started.

"Toshiro," Jason said, sure that Toshiro was waking up. He'd watched him for days; there had been no movement before. "Baby, open your eyes for me. Please wake up. I'm waiting for you."

***

" _Open your eyes for me."_

It sounded like Jason's voice. So far, so far...he kept falling...

" _Baby, come back to me."_

Jason sounded distressed, so desperate...Toshiro sighed. He had to open his eyes, for Jason, he'd do anything.

***

Beeping filled the room, Toshiro looked like he was struggling to come to, and Jason panicked, tightening his hold on Toshiro's hand. Nurses came running in followed by the doctor. Sean tried to pull Jason away from Toshiro.

"Come on, give them room to work," Sean urged.

"No." Jason moved closer to the bed. "I have to stay. I have to—

"Get him out!" the doctor ordered.

"No. Please let me stay."

Jason moved to fight the nurses who grabbed his arm and took him out. They were stronger than they looked. The beeping was so loud, the nurses busy around Toshiro's bed. He couldn't see Toshiro anymore. A sob rose up when they closed the door, and he turned away lost.

A cloud of flowers surrounded him. The comforting hug so warm, he couldn't help but bury his face into the soft cashmere jacket.

"He...okay," a soft voice said.

Somehow, that soft broken assurance seemed to soothe his aching heart. Jason clung to the woman not sure who she was. Her comfort however made her feel familiar.

She held him for what felt like hours. She didn't say much, but when he moved slightly, her hold around his shoulders loosened and he straightened up. He wiped his hand over his eyes and stared at the older Japanese woman standing before him. She was beautiful. Her eyes matched Toshiro's brown, thought not as light. She didn't smile her expression too somber to allow it. Dressed in a grey skirt suit, her haircut a neat bob, her feet in black shoes, she looked like she worked a corporate job.

She turned to a man next to her and spoke in Japanese. The man looked at him and bowed slightly.

"She is Mrs. Yuriko Natake. Mr. Toshiro is her son. She worries too," the man said.

Jason gasped.

"You—"

He'd seen her when she first came three days ago. He ignored her then thinking she was part of Michael Baron's posy. The group of law enforcement kept watching Toshiro's room as though he was going to get up and walk out. She hadn't tried to talk to him but he'd seen her watching him when he came out to go to the bathroom. Every time he stepped out of Toshiro's room, she'd watched him.

"I'm sorry," he said, feeling like a bastard. He'd been so absorbed in his worry. "Gosh, I'm so sorry."

She touched his hand and shook her head. She spoke in Japanese again, her voice gentle.

"Please don't apologize," the man next to her said. "She didn't want to intrude. It's obvious how much you care for Toshiro. She's grateful you are here."

Jason nodded and stared at her. He didn't know what to say. It was strange having a conversation with a third party translating everything. He suddenly wished he'd been good with languages. He might have taken Japanese in school or something...

She sighed and spoke again.

"Mrs. Natake apologizes. She doesn't trust her English. It's very basic."

He nodded and squeezed her hand.

"I understand." He met her worried gaze and nodded. "I really do, Mrs. Natake. Stay with me?"

Her eyes widened at his offer. Her eyes lit up like Toshiro's when she smiled and he kicked himself for not having seen the resemblance before. He squeezed her hand and turned to stare at the door waiting for the doctor.

They waited for almost half an hour. By the time the door opened, he felt like he might have traveled the world and come back. Jason took in a deep breath, watching the doctor's face as he talked to the nurses.

The doctor came toward them.

"Toshiro's family?" the doctor asked.

"Yes," Jason nodded happy when Sean moved to stand on Mrs. Natake's right side making them a unit. "How is he? Is he...okay?"

"Toshiro is awake."

Jason couldn't help the smile. He turned and hugged Mrs. Natake before he turned to the doctor.

"Can we see him?"

"He's in pain, but we're managing it. He needs rest."

"He'll get it," Jason said with a nod.

"Alright, the nurses will check on him. You can see him but don't tire him out," the doctor ordered.

Jason smiled and moved to take Mrs. Natake with him. When she didn't move, he turned to look at her.

"Aren't you coming?" he asked.

She looked at the door to Toshiro's room, her expression nervous.

"No," she said, her tone hesitant. "You go."

When he frowned, she patted his arm.

"I talk to doctor, go."

She let go of his arm and gave him a reassuring smile. Eager to see Toshiro, he hurried into Toshiro's room with a slight frown. He hoped she wouldn't leave now that Toshiro was awake.

Entering the room, he walked to the bed to find Toshiro's eyes closed. A surge of disappointment filled him because he'd hoped to see Toshiro sitting up. He stopped by the side of the bed and reached for Toshiro's hand. The nurses had remade the bed, and changed Toshiro's gown. He was in a blue one with black dots. They'd also combed his hair.

Jason sighed, his gaze dropping to Toshiro's hands.

"Why are you so disappointed?"

Jason looked up to find Toshiro watching him.

"Hey," he said on a soft pleased gasp. "You're awake."

Toshiro gave him a small tiny smile.

"You look terrible, Jason."

He laughed because that was ridiculous. He wasn't the one lying in bed with a broken arm, bruised ribs and a hole in his gut.

Gods, how could Toshiro joke right now?

Jason swallowed hard.

"I want to hold you, but I'm afraid I'm going to hurt you."

Toshiro tugged on his hand, a light movement.

"I'd really like it if you held me."

"Toshiro—

"Please," Toshiro said. "Don't make me beg."

Jason didn't need a second invitation. Walking around, he got on the bed and lay down with care. He'd chosen Toshiro's right side to get away from the IV drip and the other wires connected to Toshiro.

Jason slipped his arms around Toshiro and sighed when Toshiro shifted to move into his arms. He buried his face into Toshiro's hair and rubbed his back. They stayed like that for a while, enjoying each other's warmth.

"I was so scared," Jason confessed in a soft whisper. "Toshi, you took years off my life. I thought you were going to die."

Toshiro remained silent.

"Don't do this to me again," Jason begged. "I don't think I can take it."

Toshiro sighed then.

"If it's over, I'll come with you."

"There is no if," Jason said. "It's over. I don't care what they want from you. You're staying with me from now on. I love you, Toshiro Shindo."

The beeping on Toshiro's heart monitor changed, speeding up. Jason smiled at the small affirmation that Toshiro had heard him. Toshiro bunched his grey t-shirt.

"I love you too, Jason Stone."

***

A week later, Toshiro sat on his hospital bed drinking coffee Jason had smuggled in past the nurses. Warmth filled him at the thought of Jason. The man hadn't left his side for a second. Sean had told him how lost Jason had been when he'd been unconscious. He placed his cup on the bedside table and wondered how he'd gotten so lucky. Jason had somehow become everything to him in the space of two months.

_Funny how that worked_ , he sighed.

Today, he and Sean had conspired to get Jason out of the hospital for a few hours. Jason needed a few hours of real rest. Sean had promised to take him to his hotel room for an actual shower and a nap on a real bed. The cot in the corner looked uncomfortable.

There was a soft knock on the door before it opened. He stared at the short Japanese woman who walked in to his room. Dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, she looked out of place. Her gaze was unsure as she stood at the door watching him.

"Yes?" he asked confused by her keen study. "What is it?"

"I—"

She broke off and took a step closer to the bed. She was shaking slightly; her eyes looked like she was on the verge of tears.

"Are you alright?" he asked with a frown.

Toshiro wished he could get out of the bed, but the wound in his stomach was giving him hell. He couldn't move without help. Maybe he could call the nurses.

She shocked him when she spoke in Japanese.

"I named you Rei. Rei Natake, after your paternal grandfather," she said. "I held you every night after you were born because you wouldn't sleep unless I was holding you. You liked papaya, and hated pumpkin," a sob escaped her as she continued, "you'd spit at me when I gave it to you."

Toshiro bunched the sheets on his lap because his fingers were shaking. She had to be Yuriko Natake. He didn't know her face, but he knew her name. She was...powerful and so pure...how could she ever accept a son like him? He'd lived such a low life. If she knew, she'd be disgusted.

"Your dad used to carry you around showing you off to our friends. ' _My son,_ ' he'd say. _'Isn't he handsome_?'" She smiled through her tears. "I'd tease him for doing it so much. One night, he went out for business. You were in our bedroom playing with a toy car. I was watching you but I must have dozed. I fell asleep—

She shook her head decades of disappointment on her face.

"Just a few minutes to rest my eyes, and when I woke up, you were gone. I couldn't find you, I looked...everywhere."

Her pain shone in her eyes. All these years while he'd lived like a gangster, she'd chastised herself for that moment. That single moment that had irrevocably changed their lives. He looked away unable to take her grief.

"I'm sorry," she said in a whisper. "I'm so sorry, Rei-kun."

_That name_ , it hurt to hear it.

"I'm Toshiro Shindo now," he said, hating the bitterness in his tone.

He heard her gasp but refused to look at her. He couldn't. He didn't deserve to after how he'd lived.

"Toshiro," she said it slowly. "I am Yuriko."

Toshiro sat still. How he wanted to run into her arms and find out what that would feel like. He turned to look at her, and found her standing right by his bed. She had her hand held out to him.

"Please, I hope we can get to know each other," she said.

***

Jason leaned on the wall outside Toshiro's room and waited, hoping Toshiro would give his mother a small opening. He'd spent the past hour talking her into walking into Toshiro's room. She hadn't dared go in to see Toshiro unless he was sleeping. He'd promised Sean he'd go to the hotel if they got Yuriko to talk to her son.

Gods, Toshiro sat on the bed staring at his mother's hand.

Jason wanted to run in and shake Toshiro into submission, but that wouldn't get Toshiro to agree to anything. His boyfriend was stubborn.

It had been so hard not to tell Toshiro about his mother. The woman had worked tirelessly through the week to sort out Toshiro's legal problems. And they were many. She spent most of her days with Michael Baron, and a lawyer. She came to the hospital at night and sat by Toshiro's bed while he slept. Watching her cry over her son was heart breaking.

Toshiro took her hand hesitantly and Jason sighed in relief.

"Do you think they'll sort it out?" Sean asked beside him.

"I hope so," Jason said. "I really do. She deserves peace."

"What about Toshiro?" Sean asked. "He thought his mother was dead."

Jason sighed and moved away from the door. He rubbed his shoulders and looked along the corridor to the policemen still posted in intervals.

"I could use time away from here," he said. "I need sleep. Yuriko will watch over him for a while."

Sean chuckled.

"What?" Jason asked as they reached the elevators.

"You'll leave him to Yuriko but not to me?" Sean asked punching the button.

"She's his mother." Jason pointed out.

"Ha, here I thought you didn't care about relationships. Was it me?" Sean asked suddenly when they were in the elevator. "I don't remember this side of you when we were together. I'm a bit jealous of Toshiro."

Jason stared at his ex-boyfriend.

"I think we were friends trying to make a relationship more than it was, Sean."

Sean rolled his eyes.

"I should be hurt by that statement."

"Are you?"

"What?"

"Hurt?"

Sean shook his head.

"No. I'm happy with my husband. I'm happy you've found Toshiro."

Jason smiled and nodded in approval.

"Great. Will you be my best man?"

"Best man?" Sean gaped. "What?"

"I'm marrying him."

Sean chuckled.

"What?"

"You yelled at me when I married Mark after two months."

Jason laughed.

"Are you going to yell at me?"

Sean shook his head. "No way, I have class, thank you very much."

"Great, you're planning the wedding. The moment Toshiro can walk, we're setting the date."

***

Toshiro watched Yuriko pull up a chair to sit by his bed.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small picture. She handed it to him before she sat down.

The picture was a younger version of her holding a baby, a smiling man standing over her.

Toshiro glanced at her with a frown.

"You're the baby," she said shyly. "Then me and your dad, Jun."

He nodded and stared at the picture. The couple looked happy. He imagined his smile might have been similar to the man in the picture, though not as happy.

He looked up to find Yuriko watching him. Her gaze made him uncomfortable, so he held out the picture to her. She refused to take it.

"That's for you," she said with a husky voice.

When it was obvious she wouldn't take the picture, he placed it on the bedside table, oddly happy.

"I—" they both started and stopped.

Toshiro met her gaze and nodded.

"You go."

She smiled.

"I wanted to ask how you're doing. How's the pain?"

He lay back on his pillows.

"Manageable," he answered.

The pain hit him in intervals, or if he moved wrong. His right arm was the inconvenience. He couldn't do much without help.

"The woman who shot you is dead," Yuriko said with satisfaction. "I'd have killed her myself for hurting you."

He gaped at Yuriko's comment. Her eyes held a familiar glint of anger.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Michael Baron said as he came in. "Good morning to both of you."

"I didn't know you spoke Japanese," Toshiro said his gaze narrowing at him.

"I didn't know you were a missing baby." Michael's tone was accusing as he studied Toshiro. "You're a man of many faces, Toshiro Shindo."

Toshiro gritted his teeth refusing to look at his mother. If Michael knew about him, it meant his mother had spoken to him. This also meant she knew everything about him.

"What do you want?" he asked Michael.

"You, Toshiro," Michael said. "I don't know what you did, but you have the entire Takumi clan scrambling. We don't understand why, but the organization is imploding from the inside out. What did you do?"

Toshiro smiled.

"I took their money."

"Yes, I know that. You gave it to me, remember?" Michael said.

Toshiro studied Michael for a moment before he looked at his mother.

"The Takumi Family had accounts around the world. Money handled through very private banking, done by very suspicious people. Money made from extortion, assassinations, kidnapping and drugs, you have to be paranoid when you're keeping it."

His mother's eyes widened as she realized what he was telling her. He needed her to know what he was. What life he'd lived.

"What do you mean had?" Michael asked.

"I took it." Toshiro returned his gaze to Michael. "I'm the only one who can get it for you. With no money, the clan can't function, so they'll fight and kill each other. When they're tired, they'll come after me for revenge, since I've single-handedly brought them down. I'm sure Taki has spread the news by now. So, you have to keep me alive long enough for your trial."

"No." Yuriko stood up and glared at Toshiro. "You're not testifying, or doing anything."

"He has no choice," Michael said with a pleased smile, realizing what Toshiro had done. "He gets immunity if he testifies. Otherwise, I have to send him to jail."

"Better jail," Yuriko declared her eyes wide with worry. "You testify they come for you in time. You know."

Toshiro met her gaze, understanding what she meant. Revenge would be served. The time didn't matter, now or five to ten years later, Takumi's family would wait.

"I know," he said, meeting Yuriko's gaze. Toshiro had made his choice the moment he led Sakura to his loft. "This is the price I have to pay for the life I've led. I have no choice but to testify."

***

**Chapter 10**

"Where are you?" Yuriko Natake demanded into her phone.

She stood at the end of the hallway watching her son's door. The two police officers posted outside sat talking. She wished they'd be more vigilant. Goosebumps formed on her skin every time she thought of her son's plan.

"Kobe," Jun Natake answered. "You didn't tell me when you left."

"What's to say?" She sighed. "He needs you. I can't reach him."

"You're his mother." Jun was silent on the other end. "Or were..."

"Don't start."

"I've told you not to expect the same boy we held in our arms."

"Rei—"

She paused and closed her eyes because Jun was right.

Toshiro was a stranger to her. She was trying to get used to her son's indifferent stare. There was no sense of recognition when he looked at her. Yet for her, all she saw were Jun's eyes looking back at her so coldly.

Her husband's eyes in her son...she sighed.

"Toshiro plans to testify against Takumi. He does that, he dies; I can't lose him again, Jun. Fix it!"

Jun stayed silent at his end.

"Jun, did you hear me? Our son plans to—" she started.

"We can't stop him."

"Don't say that. You've spent the last twenty plus years looking for him. We've found him. I'm not letting him throw his life away. You can't do it either, Jun."

"And what are you going to do? Hide him at our home for the rest of his life? Keep him in a dark hole in our basement, what, Yuriko? What's your plan?"

"Anything but this," she hated it when Jun acted as though she were an innocent.

Did he think he was the only one to suffer? She hurt too. She'd lived without Rei—, Toshiro, too. Swallowing down her anger, she begged.

"Come to New York and talk him out of this, Jun. He'll listen to his father."

"I'm not his father, and you're not his mother." Jun's words stabbed her so deep she had to lean on the wall. Gods, did he never stop! "He doesn't think that way anymore, Yuriko. Remember that. Stay with him, and don't push him away."

"What are you doing that you can't come now?"

"Don't lose sight of him, Yuriko. That's all I ask of you."

Jun ended the call abruptly and she shook her head at his last remark. He'd never forgiven her for sleeping that night. _Never_. She pressed her palm against her chest as though it would ease the pain. They somehow had to get through this. They needed to get through this, and then she'd make up for everything. She'd see them as a family. She had to.

Jeez, what was Jun doing that he couldn't get on a plane to come meet the son he'd lost?

***

Jun Natake put his cell phone back into his pocket and smiled at the woman seated across him. She was two years older than he was. Beautiful: age had refined her features, even the silver streak of hair on her temple added to her classic beauty. He'd loved her once. He'd thought he'd make a life with her, but then he'd met Yuriko.

_Yuriko._ The thought of her pain undid him. It couldn't be easy for her to see Toshiro as he was now. They both remembered an innocent child, a baby they'd treasured like nothing else in this world. _Nothing._

This woman had taken that child away. Jun schooled his features to hide his anger. The stark, raving anger that made him want to tear out her amused eyes.

Gods, he wanted this woman dead.

She'd replaced his innocent child with a man who didn't know what family meant.

Jun had spent the past two years learning what he could about Toshiro Shindo.

_His son_...it hurt to think it.

Toshiro was a brilliant financial manager. Toshiro had increased the Takumi wealth, given them means to make the move to legitimate business. Toshiro's brilliant mind made the government nervous at the thought of Takumi in legitimate business.

Jun's heart squeezed tight. Toshiro was gay. There was a time that would have shocked him, but now...he was grateful. Grateful his son was alive, and not dead, or a drug addict. Instead, Toshiro had survived life under this goddamn woman, turned into a feared member of the Takumi family, and worked his way to the top.

If Toshiro planned to testify against Takumi...perhaps not all was lost.

Jun met smiling dark eyes.

"Yuriko is calling?" the woman seated across him on the low table asked.

She sipped her tea when he nodded.

"As she would, I suspect she's met him. Does she not like my handiwork? Toshiro is my prized possession. He has made us very wealthy."

Jun forced the bitter anger that rose at her proud admission. She couldn't possibly understand how much he hated her.

_Prized possession_ , he scoffed internally.

She was talking about his son, _his heir_...his lips tightened.

"Your anger is understood, but not needed, Jun. You know why I kidnapped your son."

She studied him for a moment before she turned her attention to the wide windows showing off a tranquil garden.

Jun had come here expecting to find her cowering. The Takumi estate was vast. Months ago, he'd have expected thousands of people milling around, going about daily business. He wouldn't have dreamed of entering this estate, but now, his gaze narrowed, the estate was silent.

Chaos had ruled their small town in Kobe these past two weeks. The Takumi clan enemies had attacked Takumi strong holds; burned businesses down, and left dead Takumi clan members on the streets. On entering this estate today, Jun had expected to find the place swarming with security.

Instead, Mako Takumi had retired her entire staff afraid one of them would turn on her. She'd left two men, one of which she really shouldn't trust as she did.

"You and I should have solved our differences when we were young." Mako turned to look at him now. "I think life would have been easier for both of us. You and Yuriko would have raised your son, instead of me."

"Our differences were not the reason you stole our son. You were jealous, Mako. Jealous and greedy, what did you think you'd accomplish?"

"This moment is enough for me. Watching you try to hide your pain and anger from me is amusing, Jun. Don't try. I know what it's like to lose the most precious thing in your life," Mako said with a slight smile. "I loved you. You left me and decided to marry that stupid, demure Yuriko. You hurt me, Jun Natake, for the sake of her money. I had to make you pay. So, I married the most powerful man I could find and look where that has gotten me. I should have killed Toshiro in front of your wife when I had him stolen. Your blood has hurt me once again."

Jun scoffed.

"You're so shallow, Mako. I love Yuriko. Have loved her since the moment you introduced us. She's stronger than you'll ever be. As for my son, he's done what he needed to."

"He betrayed his family. I treated him as I did Kaito, that ungrateful brat," Mako spat out, "I should have expected it."

Jun felt a burst of pride fill him at what Toshiro accomplished on his own.

"What do you want from me?" Mako demanded. "I have nothing to give you; your son has it all. He has drained our financial resources. All of them," she shook her head, still in disbelief. "Stupid brat has it all now."

"No, he doesn't." Jun answered. Since his son had taken down the monster, it was his turn to save his son. "I'm here to take his life back. You're going to give it to me."

"He's alive, isn't he? He killed Sakura, and has my Kaito in a US jail. What more do you want?"

"Release him," Jun said, holding her gaze.

"No."

Mako knew what he was asking. Toshiro's life was forfeit for what he'd done to the clan. Unless she forgave him as the matriarch of the clan, let him free and forbid anyone from killing Toshiro for the clan.

"Yours must pay for the blood spilled. This is the way."

"Release him," Jun said, not inclined to understand her. He didn't care. She'd robbed him first. "You're the one who must pay, Mako Takumi."

"I don't want to pay," Mako said. "I'd rather die than do this for you, Jun Natake. Not when I've lost everything, your son must pay for the Takumi end."

Jun stared at her for a full minute before he stood.

Fine, then he'd take the life she owed him back, even if it meant turning into one of them.

"You've made your choice."

Mako laughed.

"What are you going to do? Kill me? You can't. I'm not alone in here, Jun Natake. You're the one in the den of lions. Besides, it's too late for your son, I've sent a team after him. He'll be dead by morning."

"So you think," he said. "I'll have my family back, Mako. No Takumi blood will remain. I promise you that on my son's life."

Giving her a short bow, he turned to leave. He stopped when a painful gasp filled the room.

Jun turned in time to see a dagger Mako held in her right hand fall on the table they'd shared. Behind her a man in black stood, his sword buried into Mako's back through her heart. Mako stared at him with accusing eyes.

"Wrong choice, Mako, you should have listened to me," Jun said.

"You were always so cruel to me," Mako said, her eyes glazing with pain. "You could have killed me yourself. I'd have at least thought you cared."

"You took my son from me." Jun allowed his bitterness to color his voice.

The harrowing pain he'd lived through for two decades. The nights he'd spent watching Yuriko cry herself to sleep for her son and because their marriage had turned into a painful series of years. He had no sympathy left for the Takumi clan, or Mako.

Mako laughed then, a silent awful laugh that ended in a cough.

"You win, Jun, but your son will never be yours. He might have your blood, but I raised him. I raised him, he's-not-yours—

Jun nodded to the man behind Mako. The sword came out as fast as it had gone in. Mako fell forward on the table; she bled out in seconds.

_There was one more to go_ , Jun thought. Kaito Takumi.

"Sanitize the estate," Jun ordered the man wiping his sword with a napkin from the table. "Call the police when it's over, then we'll head to the airport."

The silent man bowed. Jun looked at Mako one last time, then turned and left the Takumi dining room.

***

The whisper of fabric woke Toshiro. Instinct had him grabbing the arm hovering over him before he opened his eyes. He stared at the syringe in the young woman's hand and tightened his hold on her wrist.

She screamed.

"Toshi," Jason sat up on his cot rubbing his eyes to take away sleep.

"Who are you?" Toshiro demanded of the frightened woman, ignoring Jason. "What—

"Gods, Toshiro," Jason rushed to his side. "Will you let her go? She's the night nurse."

"No."

Toshiro stared at the young blonde woman, his hold on her arm tight. He didn't know why she felt off. She wasn't familiar, her eyes....

"I don't have any meds scheduled at night. What is she doing here with a syringe?"

"Your doctor changed the time you get your meds." The nurse tried to extricate herself. "You're hurting me."

Toshiro narrowed his gaze.

Her eyes....he frowned.

Maybe he was losing his mind. Since Michael had confirmed his office had a leak, paranoia had set in. The endless nightmares of waking up to find Jason murdered next to him weren't helping. Michael was supposed to have moved him by now. He started to loosen his hold on her arm but stopped when she closed her fingers around the syringe.

"Jason," he said, his tone low, "go check on the officers outside the door."

"Toshi—

"Do as I say," he cut Jason off, "please, baby. Check if the police officers are still there."

Jason frowned but he hurried around the bed to the door.

The woman's arm tensed under his fingers. Glad Jason was at the door, he pushed his covers away as the woman reached to the small of her back. Before he could push off the bed, the woman dropped to the ground.

Jason stood in her place holding one of the visitor's chairs.

Toshiro stared at his boyfriend in surprise.

"What?" Jason put the chair down and stared at the fake nurse on the tiled floor.

"How did you know?"

"You're freaking out," Jason smiled and pointed to the nurse, "Now what?"

Toshiro swung his legs over the bed, and bit back a gasp as pain lanced across his stomach as he sat up. He stayed still clutching the bed railing waiting for relief. His right arm was driving him insane. He couldn't do much with it. He started to step down on the floor, only to have Jason push him back on the bed.

"Where do you think you're doing?" Jason demanded. "We need to call in the police. I'm going to get them, but you have to stay in bed, Toshiro. You're going to undo your doctor's work at this rate."

Jason's concerned tirade washed over him.

Toshiro sat on the edge of the bed staring at the passed out nurse on the floor. He frowned when he saw black hair under the blonde at her neck.

Jason pressed a kiss on his temple.

"Come on, baby. Get back into bed."

"Check her hair," Toshiro said.

"What?"

"Her hair," Toshiro nodded to the unconscious woman. "She's wearing a wig. Check her please."

Jason frowned and did as he asked. The blonde wig came off easily and Jason stood staring at the silky straight black hair hidden underneath.

"We have to go." Toshiro stated staring at the Japanese woman on the floor.

Toshiro looked up to find green eyes studying him. He'd spent two afternoons listening to Michael Baron plan his disappearance. The hospital records showed he hadn't survived the gunshot. There was a body in the morgue with Toshiro Shindo's name. They were to move him in the morning.

However, with this...Toshiro shook his head. The leak in Michael's office was making a move.

Time to leave again...time to let Jason go...his heart rejected the idea, almost plummeting from its place in his chest. He couldn't...

"I'm with you," Jason spoke as though he'd read Toshiro's thoughts. "I'm not leaving you."

That simple statement was so precious, so...Toshiro looked away and nodded.

"We have to leave," he said again, moving to get off the bed. Boy was he glad he slept in sweat pants. They were ready to go—

"What? No," Jason tried to push him back on the bed. "You can barely sit up. Where do you think you're going? It's better here where you can get help from loads of doctors if something goes wrong with your wound. We'll call Michael. Toshi—"

Toshiro placed his hand on Jason's right arm.

"Listen to me. She's the first. More are on the way. Michael can't help us right now. We'll have to call him when we get out of the hospital. We have to leave."

He met green eyes, liquid with concern they made his heart skip a beat.

"We have to leave here," he said hoping to penetrate Jason's need to stay. "I can't protect you here."

Jason stared at him, and for a moment, Toshiro wondered if his boyfriend could handle this life.

It was easy for Toshiro. Getting out, leaving at a moment's notice, he'd done that all his life, been trained how to do it well. He'd trained others...but for Jason...

He breathed in relief when Jason rushed for the wheelchair in the corner. Bringing it back, Jason helped him into the wheelchair.

"We have to tie her up."

Toshiro reached for the sheets and dragged them off the bed. Jason took them from him. He sat back in surprise when Jason ripped the sheet into strips and tied the woman's arms and legs.

"Have you done this before?" he asked when Jason dragged the woman into the private bath and closed the door.

Jason chuckled and grabbed a duffel bag he had on the couch, a heavy black sweater from the foot of the bed and Toshiro's boots.

"Just trying to survive this world you live in, Babe."

Toshiro grabbed the picture his mother had given him from the bedside table.

"Leave the rest," Toshiro said, "come on, Jason."

"Where do we go?" Jason asked, pushing his wheelchair to open the door.

There were no police officers outside his hospital room. The woman they'd tied up must have distracted them, or killed them.

"Where is Yuriko?" Toshiro asked.

"In a lounge down the hall," Jason turned the wheelchair in that direction.

"And Sean?"

"He went back to Penn Yan. I asked him to watch the shop."

"Did you see the two police offers leave?"

"The officers were there earlier when we settled in for the night, maybe they went to eat."

They entered the lounge and found Yuriko reading. She stood up the moment she saw them.

"Toshiro!" She dropped her book on the chair and stood. "Why are you out of bed? It's midnight, you know. You should be resting."

"Help me," Toshiro turned to Jason. "I need to get rid of the hospital gown."

"I don't understand what we're doing," Jason said as he helped him get out of the blue sweater he wore.

Together they removed the hospital gown and Yuriko gasped. Toshiro lifted his head to find her staring at his scars and the snake tattoo on his left arm. His life, his sordid past so plainly clear, her disgust at the sight of his scars was all too clear. There was nothing to do about it, so he turned to Jason.

Jason pulled a t-shirt from the duffel bag and moved to help him wear it. He was lucky it was two sizes larger; he fitted his cast through the armhole with no problem. Toshiro closed his eyes as they passed the fabric over the bandage around his stomach. They covered his scars from his mother, and he wore the black sweater Jason had grabbed.

"My boots," he said looking at Jason.

Jason frowned at him but he got them.

Too bad, his daggers were in an evidence box at the FBI offices. He sighed as Jason helped him wear the boots. His feet covered, Toshiro gripped the wheelchair armrests.

"Help me up."

"No!"

Both Yuriko and Jason spoke at the same time. Their protests so vehement he sat stunned. When had he gotten so many people worrying about him?

"What's going on?" Yuriko asked, her English soft and hesitant, her hand on his shoulder, as though her gentle touch would stop him.

Her touch...he stared at the elegant hand on him, so gentle, so feminine; he sat still in his wheelchair, afraid she'd notice she was touching him.

"Why aren't you in bed?" she asked.

"They're coming for me." Toshiro nodded to the open lounge door. "The police officers are gone. We stopped some woman from killing me in the room. Next, an emergency will crop up—

An alarm rang at the nurses' station cutting him off. Toshiro started, dragging his thoughts from his mother and her touch to their immediate problem. If the assassins found the woman had failed, they'd start looking for him. A team of four, plus the woman, five..., Toshiro shuddered. He didn't have the means to fight, not like this. He could barely stand on his own.

"We have five minutes to get to the emergency room," he said deciding on fast escape.

Yuriko rushed to take her handbag from the lounge chair. She stuffed her book in her handbag and took her jacket.

"Toshiro, the wheelchair is easier for you," Jason said, as he swung the duffel bag strap over his shoulder and reached for the wheelchair handles.

Jason wheeled him around to head to the door. Toshiro dumped the hospital gown into the trashcan as they left the lounge. Yuriko ran beside his chair. She was the one to punch the elevator buttons. Thankfully, they didn't have to wait long. The elevator doors opened quickly, and they entered. The nurses were running to a room in the opposite direction.

Toshiro sighed in relief when the doors closed. He counted the seconds as the elevator went down. The elevator doors slid open on the ground floor to the busy emergency room.

"Now what?" Jason asked.

"We get to the exit. They'll avoid the emergency room at all costs, too many cameras, too many people."

"How you know this?" Yuriko asked him as they hurried through the busy New York emergency room.

Nurses assumed they'd already gotten their treatment. They passed an open crash cart and Toshiro grabbed a box of gloves, bandages and tape.

He needed to find meds that would numb his wounds. Jason was careful but not enough. The motion of the wheelchair as they made turns sent waves of pain across his stomach. At some point, he was going to need to get up, but his abdomen ached... _shit._ He gritted his teeth as much as he could to avoid worrying Jason and Yuriko.

"What did you say?" he asked Yuriko.

"How you know what they do?" she asked as they turned a corner heading toward the main emergency room entrance and exit.

It was dark outside, minimal people.

"I trained them." Toshiro pointed to a newly arrived ambulance.

The EMTs were too busy rushing in their patient and they left the ambulance unattended.

"Stop," Toshiro ordered. "We need pain meds."

"What? No." Yuriko balked.

"We don't have time for arguments," he urged Jason. "You're going to have to do it for me, Babe. I can't jump in and out."

"Of all times to call me that," Jason teased as he hurried for the open doors. A second later, Jason jumped down with a simple nod.

Toshiro hid a smile at how quickly Jason whisked him away from the ambulance and the returning EMT team. He was corrupting his boyfriend. Yuriko wasn't happy as she kept pace with them. They went down the street, which was somewhat deserted.

"We need a car," Toshiro said when they'd left the hospital area.

"We should get taxi," Yuriko said.

"A taxi is too cumbersome. We don't want to involve another person," he said.

Toshiro pointed across the street at a black SUV parked on the curb. There were other cars, but the SUV had tinted windows.

"Steal car?" Yuriko asked shaking her head; she gave Jason a worried look.

"In case you didn't notice, we've already robbed the hospital off a wheelchair." Toshiro pointed out.

They reached the SUV, and Jason tried the doors and found them locked.

"Great," Jason said.

Taking one of the leg-rests off, Toshiro locked the wheelchair and moved to get up. Yuriko grabbed his left arm, and the action had him jerking in surprise. She didn't let go, and he was thankful because getting up felt like a thousand needles were poking his abdomen. Staying up....Toshiro gritted his teeth as pain arced down his left leg. The pain was sobering. He held it in, allowed it to clear his senses.

"Are you okay?" Jason asked moving closer. "We don't have to do this. We can just get a taxi—

"No time," he gritted out.

Taking a step closer to the SUV, he used the metal leg rest to break the back passenger window. The glass caved in, and he hit it again. The glass shattered into cubes. He reached in and unlocked the driver's door.

"Put the wheelchair in the back," he asked Jason.

"You're like a criminal," Jason commented folding up the wheelchair. "I can't believe you did that."

Toshiro grinned, biting back a moan as he struggled into the driver's seat. Pain stung through his body, brought tears to his eyes.

Gods, it was unrelenting.

Gritting his teeth, Toshiro managed to settle behind the wheel.

"Yuriko, get in the front, Jason backseat, hurry," he said, his voice rough with strain.

Closing the driver's door, he sat back to catch his breath. Yuriko slid in next to him and he watched her buckle herself in. Jason was already in the back seat and was busy pushing pieces of glass out of the way.

"This is first time I steal car," Yuriko mused.

Jason replied, "Me too, Yuriko."

Toshiro watched the hospital ahead of them. Five minutes were past. The team had to have figured out he'd left. They'd try to catch him before he left the hospital. Driving out in a rush would get them into a speed chase. He wasn't in any shape for that. They'd have to play this a different way. His heartbeat sped up; he had two people to protect.

"Why aren't we moving?" Jason asked leaning forward. "Are you in pain? You should let me drive."

Toshiro turned down the driver's visor and a bunch of keys fell on his lap.

_People in this country,_ he mused.

Taking the keys, he fit them in the ignition and waited.

"Toshiro?" Yuriko started.

"Shh..." he said when he caught the shadow he was looking for. He pointed out a man standing in the middle of the street a block away. "First one, he's waiting, listening."

The man stood still, a gun glinting in his right hand. A second man walked down the street checking cars soon joined the first.

"Aren't they going to see us?" Jason asked in a whisper.

"I need two more," Toshiro said.

He needed two more; the woman was probably dead since she'd failed her task. Two shadows appeared four cars behind the SUV. They too watched the cars carefully, searched the street with their eyes. The assassins figured he was injured so he couldn't move too fast. They were right, but they wouldn't know he had Jason or Yuriko with him, unless the leak in Michael's office had given them pictures.

Toshiro hoped not. He was making a gamble here.

"Jason, do you have a cap?"

"Yeah," Jason said.

"Wear it, and sit back."

Jason reached for the duffel bag, got a black cap and did as asked. Glancing at Yuriko, Toshiro assessed her black jacket, and her shoulder length hair falling around her face.

"Yuriko, hold your hair up in a ponytail."

"What?"

"I need your hair held. It will be less recognizable, they might have seen pictures of you with your hair down," he explained. "Use the stretchy thingy on your left wrist."

She did as he asked without another question and he started the car. The sound of the engine starting did what he wanted. The four men turned to look at the SUV. He turned on the lights, blinding them. Slowly, deliberately slow, Toshiro pulled out of the parking spot and drove toward them.

"Jason, I need you to smile, and nod at them."

"They're holding guns, babe."

"I know, but your window is open. You have to distract them enough that they're not suspicious. You can do this," he soothed. "Be casual, make eye contact. You're just a guy out on the town with friends."

Jason blew out air as they approached the four men who'd separated two on each side of the one-way street. The ones on Yuriko's side wouldn't see anything but tinted glass. The ones on the right side of the car, those could see inside, Toshiro fought to keep the speed slow as though they were trying to figure out where to head out next.

Toshiro held his breath as they reached the four men. His foot itched to press on the gas and speed off, but that would just lead to an abrupt shootout. Through the tinted glass, he watched the two men on his side stare into the car.

Then he heard Jason. "How you doin', fellas? Late night?"

One of them chuckled casually, the sound off and then the man nodded in answer to Jason's question.

Jason smiled at them and the SUV passed without incident.

Toshiro fought not to speed; he still needed to get to the end of the street. His gaze on the rear view mirror, he watched the four men walk to the spot he'd left. They'd find the glass soon enough.

He reached the end and turned right.

Toshiro ignored all his pain and focused on driving. His foot heavy on the gas pedal, he drove down the two-way then cut abruptly into the first building with underground parking. He drove into the dimly lit halls, past rows of cars, and parked the SUV in the farthest corner he could find.

Jason jumped out of the car dragging his duffel bag with him.

Toshiro had a harder time getting out of the car.

Jason had to help him out.

They chose an unlocked navy blue Toyota Supra. Toshiro fell into the backseat and watched Jason search for keys. He smiled when Jason found them in the glove compartment.

Gods, the man hadn't complained once... _so sexy._

"Drive slowly, no rush. The assassins will have reached the main road. Join traffic and make the first turn you find," Toshiro said.

Toshiro raised his sweater and t-shirt to study the bandage on his stomach. He hadn't ripped out the stitches yet, but it hurt. Damn it hurt. He glanced up to find his mother watching him from the rear view mirror.

"Is this your life?" Yuriko asked as he covered his stomach from her gaze.

"Of late," he answered her.

"What did you mean you trained those people?" she asked.

He watched Jason drive. Their gazes met in the rear view mirror. Jason gave him the slightest nod as though he could understand what his mother was asking in Japanese. Was it any wonder he loved Jason with each passing minute.

_This was easier to do with Jason_ , he thought.

Otherwise, he might have given up a while back. Jason gave him another assuring nod and Toshiro turned to his mother.

"Before they took me to school, I lived in the Takumi estate. Learning to fight and then fighting to survive, when they'd stripped me of any sense of humanity but survival, they remade me. I learned well, Yuriko. Well enough to have gotten to the top, and helped Kaito Takumi run the clan. I happily helped him until a month ago when he stabbed me and left me for dead. Without Jason here, we'd never have met."

She turned in her seat to look at him.

"Why do you talk to me that way?"

Toshiro frowned.

The streetlights cast shadows over her face as Jason drove along the highway.

Toshiro read hurt in her eyes, but he couldn't understand why she felt it.

"You talk to me as though you're defending yourself," she explained when he didn't answer her question. "As though you think I'm offended by you."

"Aren't you?"

He held her gaze and pulled the sleeve on his left arm so that she could see the snake winding around his wrist and up his arm.

"This is who I've been, still who I am. I'm _yakuza_ ," he spat the word out at her. "Gangster, Yuriko. I'm the worst kind too, because you never know when I hurt you until it's too late. It's the reason we're in this stolen car—

"Enough," she interrupted him. "You and your father must think I'm some weak woman who can't handle reality. Yes, I was shocked to know you're _yakuza._ I _was_ disappointed but I was also glad. I've had two decades worth of nightmares thinking you dead. Now that I see you alive, who you are doesn't matter so much. What makes you think I can't handle your ugly truths?"

He started to reply but she snapped at him.

"I don't want to hear another word. My heart aches when I listen to you. It's your turn to listen now. Are we safe?"

He nodded.

"We're safe for now. They'll regroup; find another way to get to me. Michael needs to find this mole or we're all going to be dead soon."

"I'll handle it," she turned to Jason and used her awful English. "Drive to good hotel in city. The type with huge rooms, yes? You know one?"

Jason smiled and nodded. "Sure."

"Good, my son, no longer in charge, too stubborn. My turn, I teach him another way," she declared. "So like father...hardheaded and bad-mannered."

Jason met Toshiro's gaze through the rear view mirror and winked. Toshiro scowled at him and wondered again how he'd gotten so many people to care what he did in such a small amount of time.

***

"Bet you miss a shower," Jason said hours later.

He had spent the last five hours watching Toshiro sleep fitfully. He and Yuriko had booked into the Oriental hotel at around two in the morning. Two hours of running, and he'd wanted to take Toshiro away for good. He still couldn't believe someone had tried to kill his boyfriend. Toshiro had woken up thirty minutes ago with a gasp, his eyes wide, soaked in sweat.

_More nightmares,_ Jason thought.

He wished he had a fast cure for Toshiro. Instead, all he could offer was a sponge bath.

Toshiro sat on a stool in the bathroom while Jason changed the bandage covering his wound. Checking the stitches, Jason was glad Toshiro hadn't ripped them open moving around. The skin around the wound was an angry red. They'd have to keep checking on it. Applying ointment, Jason placed a clean square bandage over it and taped it. Toshiro sat with his head leaning back on the wall.

"I'm sorry, Jason, this life—

"I'm going to make this hurt if you keep apologizing to me," Jason warned as he wrapped a bandage around Toshiro's torso.

"It's not going to get easier," Toshiro said when Jason finished with the bandage.

"I don't want easy."

Jason removed the gloves he wore and dumped them into the trashcan beside him. Sitting back on his haunches, he met Toshiro's gaze.

"There's no where else I'd rather be than here."

Toshiro studied him. Light brown eyes, so full of shadows, and so beautiful they made his heart ache.

Toshiro sighed.

"I want to kiss you, Jason, but you're going to have to get closer. My stomach is killing me."

Jason laughed and got to his feet, sweeping fingers through Toshiro's silky black hair, tilting his head up to kiss him. The taste of Toshiro was so new yet so familiar. He missed him, missed doing more than kiss. He sighed against Toshiro's lips.

"I love you."

Toshiro touched his jaw and kissed him again.

"I love you too and thank you."

"For what?" Jason asked.

Toshiro stroked his jaw with his thumb, "For taking me on with my baggage."

"Your baggage is temporary." Jason pressed kisses along Toshiro's jaw, and then said against his ear. "You're marrying me, right?"

He felt Toshiro's sharp intake of breath. Toshiro pulled back to look at him.

"What did you just ask me?"

Jason smiled.

"Marry me, Toshi."

Toshiro stared at him then for the first time smiled, as Jason had never seen. The smile brightened Toshiro's eyes, sending away shadows he'd never imagined would disperse. It sent his heart into a wild dance.

"Do you really want me for life?" Toshiro asked again.

"If it's what you want too," Jason said.

Toshiro took his right hand with his left.

"It is, Jason. The only thing that matters to me is to belong with you."

Jason helped Toshiro up and pulled him into his arms. He wrapped his arms around Toshiro and held on tight, careful not to cause pain.

"Is that a yes, then?" he asked.

Toshiro nodded against his shoulder.

"Yes."

The soft whisper was like a balm taking away all the trouble outside their door.

He held Toshiro until Toshiro sagged against him when it got too hard to stand. He rubbed his boyfriend's back gently.

"Let's get you changed into comfortable clothes. Yuriko is coming back soon."

Toshiro sighed heavily as they headed back to the bedroom.

***

"That woman," Toshiro said thinking his mother was out of her mind. "Who could have guessed she was so bossy? Did you hear her? ' _Don't leave this suite._ ' You'd think I don't know how to lay low."

Toshiro scoffed as they walked to the bed.

Yuriko had run out of the suite hours ago when he'd been too drowsy to think. Stupid meds were getting him so groggy. She'd looked so determined, he was afraid to find out what she'd gone to do.

Jason was helping him with his t-shirt when a knock came on the door. His shoulders tensed and he wished he had a weapon. His fingers itched for a gun, anything to use...

"It's me," Yuriko said from the other side.

Toshiro shrugged into the t-shirt, wincing slightly as he tugged the shirt over his scarred torso. He didn't want to see his mother's horrified expression again. Jason squeezed his shoulder and went to open the door. Yuriko hurried in carrying shopping bags and food. God help him. Had she used a credit card? She'd used cash to pay for the suite downstairs but this...

"Did you two sleep?" she asked looking at him.

Her gaze was critical, as though she genuinely cared if he had slept.

That look stirred something deep inside him that scared him. He didn't have the will to deal with it right now, not with their lives in danger.

He scowled at her.

"Who can sleep when you're out roaming? Don't you know what lay low means? Please tell me you didn't use a credit card." Toshiro demanded from his perch on the bed.

"Nobody pays attention to a middle-aged Japanese woman prowling a mall. And no, I'm not stupid. I've watched spy movies, Toshiro. I used cash," she countered. "I can see a few hours spent with Jason haven't cured your foul mood."

_Movies,_ lord help him!

He chocked on a laugh, and instead scowled at her.

Jeez, was she real?

Jason came to sit next to him tangling their fingers together. His world righted at the feel of Jason's solid frame beside him.

"Please talk English; you're leaving out my boyfriend from this delicious argument," he said with a small smile because he knew she was self-conscious with her English.

Yuriko dropped her shopping bags on a couch. She placed a brown bag from an Italian restaurant on the coffee table and his stomach growled.

Yuriko glanced at Jason.

"My son, his bad mood not go away. I talk my English. Hope you no mind."

Jason squeezed his fingers to stop him from talking.

"You should practice more, Yuriko. I don't mind."

She nodded and sat on the couch. She opened the first bag of shopping.

"I buy many clothes. I know Toshiro size, so I choose double size for you, Jason. No need to stay in dirty clothes."

Jason nodded.

"I'm sure it's all good, Yuriko. Thank you."

"No need to thank," she smiled placing the bag on the couch again. "You family, yes?"

Jason glanced at him and that moment, sharing the secret of their engagement felt like another first. Family, huh...so this is what it felt like?

"I call Michael."

"You what?" Toshiro gaped at his mother. He got up too fast; he ignored the pain and stalked to a surprised Yuriko. "Give me your cell phone. Are you insane? Why would you call that man on your cell phone when his office has a leak?"

She reached into her handbag and got her cell phone. He grabbed for it, but she stood up and refused to let go of the phone.

"I use payphone across town. I know how to protect too," she said slowly. "Do you still need phone?"

"Who else have you called?" he demanded staring at the black gadget.

"Your father," she held his gaze. "He's on the way. I not want to lose phone, for him."

His father!

He let go off the phone in shock.

"What's decision?" Yuriko asked. "No phone or phone? Tell me, Toshiro. I destroy it if you want."

He stared at her blankly.

He'd forgotten he had a father in all this. One who'd triggered this whole situation. If someone hadn't told Jun Natake about him...he might have lived out his life as Toshiro Shindo never knowing the truth.

"Toshiro?" Yuriko touched his arm and he stepped away from her. "What's wrong? Pain? I get medicine. Jason, help."

"I'm fine," he managed before they both went into full panic mode. "I—

He moved back to the bed, walking along the left side suddenly too tired. He sat down, and shifted until he sat reclined against the headboard.

Jason and his mother stood watching him.

"What did Michael say?" he asked then.

"We stay put. I not tell him where we stay. I promise to call tomorrow. He sort leak out by then." Yuriko still watched him with concerned dark brown eyes. "Are you okay? Did I say something?"

He shook his head and gave her a slight smile.

"I'm fine, Yuriko. Thank you for everything. I think I'll try to sleep some more."

"Yes," she nodded. "Sleep is good. Jason, I leave him to you. I'm right next door. Don't leave for any reason, yes? I listen. So, don't leave..."

Jason moved to hug her.

"I get it. No leaving Toshiro," he said. "Go rest, I'm think you need to sleep too. You've been up too long."

Jason let her go and she turned to Toshiro. Yuriko stared at him as though she wanted to come over to the bed. Toshiro sat still terrified she might actually come. He let out a quiet relieved breath when she gave him a small wave. She let Jason lead her out of the hotel room.

Jason came back a few minutes later.

"I think your mom is afraid you might disappear on her."

"It's strange to hear talk about my mother," he confessed.

Jason crawled onto the bed and stretched out beside him.

"What were you thinking about just now? When you were talking to your mum?"

Toshiro reached for Jason's hand and held it against his chest.

"She said my father is coming."

When Jason didn't say anything, he continued.

"I've never had a father. I envied Kaito's loyalty to his, even when he killed him. Their relationship was sick, twisted, spoiled by power. Still I envied Kaito. I kept thinking, if I had a father, I'd never raise a hand against him. Now—

"You have one."

"Yeah," Toshiro let out a small breath. "I have a father."

"And a mother," Jason reminded him. "She's right across the hall pretending to sleep when all she wants is to sit in here and watch you."

Toshiro sighed and shifted lower on the bed. His brain ached if that were possible. He moved until Jason could pull him into his arms. Breathing in Jason's scent, he closed his eyes. This here was all that mattered. Everything else...he buried his face into Jason's chest...everything else could wait.

Jason stroked fingers through his hair and he closed his eyes, and drifted to sleep.

***

Chapter 11

Toshiro sat on the bed, legs crossed, watching Jason sleep. Morning crept in, in that silent way it had. The light slowly creeping through the curtains behind him, it turned Jason's hair gold. He touched the soft strands delicately, not willing to wake Jason just yet.

Jason.

He still couldn't believe this was real. This man, sleeping so peacefully, was his. It seemed untrue.

Like a dream.

_Marry me,_ Jason had said with a smile.

His heart skipped and he frowned. He'd never thought luck would favor him this way. Not with someone to love him, never that.

A soft sound outside the door drew his thoughts away from Jason. It wasn't noise, really, but a feeling. A sense that someone stood outside the door.

Yuriko?

Toshiro got off the bed careful not to wake Jason. He doubted Jason would wake up anyway. They'd had a very tiresome two days. He wanted Jason to catch up on his sleep.

On bare feet, Toshiro went to the sitting area where Yuriko had left the brown bag of food a day ago. He hadn't eaten much of the food. He reached in and grabbed a plastic fork. Staring at it, he shook his head. He seriously needed to remedy this 'no weapons' problem.

Sneaking a glance at Jason, he was happy to see him still sleeping.

Moving to the door, the fork held tight in his left fist, Toshiro looked through the peephole. There was no one, just an empty hallway.

He frowned and stepped away from the door, standing still, he waited. He wasn't wrong. There was _something there...someone..._

***

Toshiro waited on the other side of the door.

He could feel him there.

Toshiro was definitely standing there with a dark frown, so typical of the ferocious snake that had fought his way to the top. The man missed nothing.

Gods, how he hated Toshiro's guts. To have both parents living and searching was a privilege he didn't know. Toshiro, with all his bad attitude and anger, was blessed to have that in his life. He couldn't help but be jealous of Toshiro's luck.

Aside from that, Toshiro's sense of survival was sharp. The man crawled out of trouble even if it meant digging in his nails into solid rock and climbing up. That kind of instinct was difficult to handle, probably the reason why Toshiro irritated him so much. He was jealous of Toshiro while admiring his need to live no matter what. A grin tugged on his lips when he imagined Toshiro's reaction at the sight of him. It was going to be a shock for sure. All this time, he and Toshiro had fought and abused each other...he touched his sore nose; it still hurt from Toshiro's head butt.

Speaking of which, the punk was probably standing on the other side holding a gun.

He took a step back, hoping not to feel a bullet in his gut. Toshiro could easily shoot through the wall. He wasn't ready to die yet he had a goal to meet.

"What are you doing?" Jun Natake asked.

He glanced up to find the older man walking down the hall.

He brought his finger to his lips, and then pointed at Toshiro's door.

Jun reached him and stopped right outside the door to Toshiro's suite. Jun knocked firmly on the smooth wooden surface.

He wasn't surprised when there was no answer.

Toshiro was too cautious. Too paranoid.

"It's me," Jun said. "I'm your...f-father."

Still the door stayed locked.

Toshiro was no fool.

Toshiro wouldn't open until he knew who else was with Jun Natake.

***

Toshiro stared at the door, his father's voice ringing through his head. His chest tight, he fought the urge to open the door. There was someone else out there. He knew it.

His grip on the fork tightened. Toshiro wished he had a gun.

His father wouldn't dare betray him. He wouldn't dare, right?

Toshiro glanced back at the bed where Jason still slept. His main priority now was keeping Jason safe. No matter what, Jason's safety came first.

***

Jun Natake stepped back from the door a tad hurt. He hadn't thought his declaration would get Toshiro running into his arms.

However...he'd hoped.

That would make things easy. Make Toshiro somewhat real to him.

He sighed and turned to walk down the hall to the next door. He knocked and the door opened immediately. Yuriko threw herself into his arms and he smiled. Her reaction healed the sting from his son's rejection.

"You're late," Yuriko accused, her voice muffled against his chest. "I haven't slept for two days. Where were you? I worried."

He hugged her tight then stepped back.

"I want to meet him."

Yuriko dropped her arms from around him and stared at him.

He hoped she saw his desperate need.

Their son was alive.

He couldn't think past that truth right now _._

Fear that she'd take his demand as a rejection had him searching her face. He found sadness in her liquid dark eyes. There was a tinge of uncertainty quickly replaced by her armor. That strong armor she hugged around her, it kept her emotions hidden from him. He wished she wouldn't, but was grateful that she did. It was hard enough knowing he hurt her.

He didn't miss the dark circles under her eyes. She looked exhausted. He'd pushed her hard in the past few years, worse in the last week. Pushed their marriage to limits he didn't dare mention for years. She'd stuck to him though and that was worth lifetimes. He rubbed his thumb over her cheek before he kissed the soft skin.

"Thank you for taking care of him," he said, not stepping into the hotel room. "Please, let me meet him. I've waited so long."

Yuriko nodded and stepped out of the hotel room, closing the door behind her. She held his hand tightly. Her slender fingers warm in his. He couldn't remember the last time they'd held hands like this. Yuriko's hair was in a haphazard ponytail. She was dressed in a light t-shirt and fitted jeans. Her feet were in pink sandals. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her this way either. Dark suits, hair in a bun, that he remembered, but not this woman leading him to their son's door. She looked braver somehow.

_More determined_ , he thought as she stopped outside Toshiro's door.

Her knock was soft, less abrupt than his was.

"Toshiro, its Yuriko. Please open the door." She leaned her forehead on the door. "I'm with your father."

"Who else?" Toshiro demanded on the other side.

Jun gaped and looked at the young man he'd turned from Mako Takumi's clan. How had Toshiro known there was a third person?

Yuriko glanced at the young man with an uncertain frown. She'd once told him she never wanted to know what he was doing. Which was just as well since she could never have handled his choices.

"One of your father's men," she said now with a slight shiver. "We can trust him."

There was a soft curse on the other side and then the lock turned. The door flew open, and Yuriko was pulled into the room. The abrupt movement had her letting go of his hand.

"Trust no one," the order came in a rough tone tinged with annoyance.

In seconds, Yuriko stood hidden behind a shirtless young man.

His son wasn't tall, but his aura was dark enough to threaten. His hair fell around his face, hiding it. Jun wished it were shorter then he'd get to see more of his son's handsome face. He'd only seen that face in pictures. Never so bare, so closed off.

Jun took in the white cast on Toshiro's right arm, then the tight left fist. There was a white bandage wrapped around Toshiro's abdomen. The gunshot Yuriko had told him about. It couldn't have healed yet. There had to be pain, but Toshiro stood tall, as though he were invincible. His gaze returned to Toshiro's left fist. There was a plastic fork there.

Toshiro was uneasy.

Reaching into his jacket, Jun tugged out the gun he wore in his holster. Toshiro studied him not moving. Most people would make a gesture of defense at the sight of a gun but not his son. Toshiro stood his ground, light brown eyes hard as he stared at him, refusing to move. Jun realized that Toshiro was protecting his mother. Toshiro would use himself as a shield for Yuriko if necessary.

Pride swelled, and he held out the gun to his son.

Toshiro took the gun in one quick motion, his gaze never shifting from the doorway.

Surprise hit him when Toshiro trained the gun at him.

"Show yourself," Toshiro said, his tone cold.

Jun frowned.

"Do it, or I shoot him," Toshiro repeated.

It was frightening to see the truth of Toshiro's words in his eyes. _His son_ would shoot him.

Jun frowned as the young man he'd taken from Mako came to stand beside him. The gun leveled on the young man.

The young man pushed him aside and drew his sword.

Jun gasped worried he'd made the wrong decision. Relief flooded him when the young man dropped to his knees. The young man placed the sword on the carpet and bent his head low.

***

Toshiro stared at Taki in shock.

Every instinct had him wanting to shoot the bastard. All those times they'd fought, all those times....his finger flexed over the trigger. His thoughts filled with Taki's attitude toward him when Sakura had captured him.

What was Taki doing with his father?

Toshiro looked at Jun Natake.

"Explain," he said. "I'm going to kill him and you if I don't like what I hear."

"He killed Mako Takumi."

"So?" Toshiro demanded. "He'll kill all of us if it suits him. That's not good enough."

"Toshiro," Yuriko touched his cast and he shrugged her hand away. He didn't have time for her softness.

"Check on Jason," he ordered her. "He's asleep. I don't want to wake him up."

"Toshi—

"Do as I say," he snapped at her when she didn't stop.

Yuriko moved around him and slapped him across his left cheek.

The sting wasn't painful; that she'd done it surprised him more.

"Yes, I've slapped you. What are you going to do? Shoot me?" she demanded looking at the gun he held pointed at her.

Cursing under his breath, he lowered his gun.

"I'd rather you shoot me than listen to you threaten to kill your own father," Yuriko said. "Your father values your life, you brat. He has moved the heavens to find you. I won't watch you treat your father badly."

"Yuriko," Jun said from the doorway.

"Jun get into this hotel room. I won't have the hotel staff thinking we're running a spectacle here. There are people watching. Jeez, why couldn't I marry a simpler man? He has your genes, you know. Stubborn, impossible," Yuriko cursed under breath. "Toshiro stop glaring at me and move away from the door."

When Taki didn't get up from the floor, she snapped at him.

"What are you waiting for?"

Toshiro moved fast to pick up the sword Takino placed on the ground. He ignored his father and went to sit on a stool close to Jason's bed. His left cheek stung. His mother had a wicked slap. He shifted his jaw a bit awed by her attitude.

Yuriko was tougher than she looked.

He glanced up when the door slammed closed. Taki was smart enough to stay right at the door and not move into the room.

His father however moved closer coming to stand before him.

"Were you really going to shoot me?" Jun asked.

He looked up to meet eyes that matched his own.

"Are you offended?"

"Not at all," Jun said with a shrug. "It's good to know where I stand, that way I know what I have to work with."

He held his father's gaze for a second before he looked away.

"Keep it down. I don't want to wake my boyfriend. He's had a rough week."

He glanced at his father then to judge what he thought of that statement. Jun nodded and folded his arms against his chest as though it didn't matter. His gaze returned to Taki and he felt a tinge of uneasiness fill him. He'd never liked Taki.

"Why are you with Taki? He's not loyal."

"He's loyal to me."

"That doesn't mean much to me."

"It should." Jun moved to sit on the bed and Toshiro couldn't help but reach for the gun. He didn't want anyone close to Jason.

Jun paused, his gaze on Toshiro's hand for a second before it slid to Jason's sleeping form.

Toshiro was happy when Jun stepped away from the bed. His father was no idiot.

"Taki has worked for me for ten years. He found you for me. He'll help us reach Kaito Takumi."

Toshiro studied Taki. He hated the man. Had always hated how arrogant Taki acted with him. What about the punches when Sakura had captured him? The slurs against his mother...Toshiro shook his head.

Worked for his father? What? Was his father yakuza too?

Toshiro frowned.

_Not yakuza_ , he thought.

Jun Natake's blood wouldn't allow him. No, his father had probably found a way to bend laws to his will...enough to allow him to live in the grey areas.

"Why did you bring him here?" Toshiro asked now, his gaze never leaving Taki.

"I want you to refuse to testify."

"That gets me arrested without any negotiations," Toshiro said, looking at his father.

"I know. Taki will go in with you." Jun sat on the edge of a table close to the window. "That's a good thing. You'll be inside close to Kaito."

"Takumi will kill me." Toshiro pointed out. "I'll die the first night."

"Not if you have Taki with you." Jun smiled. "He'll protect you."

"Protect me?" Toshiro scoffed looking at the man leaning on the wall beside the door. That sounded straight out of a fantasy. Jeez, his parents were crazy. "I don't like it."

"I don't like it either. You're a pain in the ass," Taki said from the door, his voice making Jason shift on the bed.

Toshiro scowled at him as Jason sat up. Grabbing the gun, he stood up and moved around to Jason's side. Jason looked around the room and started to get off the bed. His green eyes filling with worry.

"My father, and..." Toshiro assured Jason, and then stared at Taki. "Someone I want to kill."

Jason pushed the covers away and wiped a hand down his face.

"Seems every time I wake up you want to kill someone, babe."

Toshiro chuckled. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, me too," Jason said, standing up his gaze on the gun Toshiro held. Toshiro sighed and tucked it into his pants in the small of his back.

He shifted with Jason making sure he wasn't in Taki's direct line.

"How's your stomach?" Jason asked his voice still heavy with sleep.

"As good as it's going to get," Toshiro replied.

Jason studied him for a second. The worry in those green eyes undid him. Jun coughed behind him and he sighed when Jason looked at the older man with slight recognition. Toshiro scowled when Jason deliberately moved around him to greet his father.

"I'm sorry. Toshi is not big on pleasantries," Jason said. "I'm Jason Stone, his boyfriend."

Jun smiled wide as he took Jason's hand and switched into fluent English.

"Nice to meet you," Jun said. "I'm Jun Natake, Toshiro's father."

"Yuriko has told me a lot about you. I'm glad you could make it to see Toshiro." Jason turned his attention to Yuriko. "Did you sleep?"

Yuriko stood behind the couch her arms folded against her chest. She smiled at Jason.

"Very little, I wait for Jun. I'm happy you wake up. Husband with bad attitude, son with worse attitude, I need help to control."

Jason chuckled and touched Toshiro's shoulder.

"What's going on?" Jason asked him.

"My father is in a crazy dream, and he brought along my worst nightmare."

"I want Toshiro to turn himself in," Jun explained to Jason. "I'll make sure he doesn't testify in any case because Kaito will be dead."

"What?" Jason froze beside him, "but he'll die in prison. We just escaped from a hospital where people tried to kill Toshiro. You're not thinking right."

"I took care of the hit squad," Taki said then. "They're headed to Japan in body bags. Toshiro is safe from everyone except Kaito."

"Do you want a medal for the hard work?" Toshiro snapped.

"You're the bastard who trained them," Taki accused. "You should thank me for undoing that whole clan. It wasn't easy."

"Fuck you, Taki." Toshiro scowled at him.

"Insulting each other not solve problem," Yuriko said. "Maybe we talk to Michael Baron before making decision."

"He has a mole in his office. Do you think he can protect Toshiro?" Jun asked, and then turned to look at Toshiro. "He'll get you killed, Toshiro. You have to know this, I know you do."

"So, I'll fight my way out," Toshiro replied with a sigh. "It's nothing new."

"You do know this is your life they're talking about, right? Our life?" Jason asked. "Can you get serious for a second?"

Toshiro met worried green eyes. "It's going to be fine, Jason."

"You keep saying that," Jason said, before he sat on the edge of the bed, his shoulders slumped.

"Kaito is the last of Takumi blood," Jun said. "If he stays alive, you'll have a bounty on your head for the rest of your life. The people you care for will be in danger: Jason, your mother, me...as well as anyone who helps you."

Toshiro winced, as Jason's shoulders seemed to slump further. Seeing Jason so worried annoyed Toshiro. The room suddenly felt too small. There were too many people meddling with his life.

"Don't you think I know?" Toshiro asked his father. "I'm not a killer. If I were, I'd have killed Kaito a long time. The best I can do is maiming him."

"I'm a killer," Taki said then. "I'll kill Kaito."

Taki's declaration worried Toshiro. It didn't assure him at all. He didn't know what Taki's deal was and he hated that it left him uneasy, but they were right about one thing. Sitting around waiting for help wasn't helping.

"I'm going to call Michael," Toshiro said.

"What, no," Yuriko started moving around the couch. "He said to wait—

"Enough waiting, Mother," Toshiro interrupted her. "The longer we wait the more time the other side has time to plan. I don't want that. This ends now."

Yuriko smiled.

"That's first time you call me Mother."

Seriously, that's what she got from this conversation?

Toshiro scowled at her. "Well, don't get used to it."

"You know, I not mind the short form. Mum, Mom, Mamma..."

"Can I call you Mom?" Jason asked getting up from the bed. He moved to wrap an arm around her shoulders.

"Of course," Yuriko smiled pleased by Jason's half hug. "It might infect my son to start calling me that."

Toshiro gaped and a snicker came from Taki by the door.

"What are you laughing about?" Toshiro asked irritated. "I still want to kill you."

"Kill me fast before I drown in all this mush," Taki returned, meeting his gaze with a challenge.

Toshiro didn't fight the red haze that came over him. He rushed Taki allowing his anger free reign.

Finally, a face he could punch with no remorse.

He attacked Taki like there were no wounds on his body. Grabbing Taki by the neck, he slammed him back against the wall. His fingers dug into the delicate skin at the neck, pushing hard, satisfaction flooding him when Taki gasped for air. He growled when Taki's fingers sunk into his hair in a desperate attempt to pull him away.

Pain slammed through him when Taki punched a low blow into his stomach. He lost his hold on Taki's neck long enough for the other man to grab and slam him against the wall.

"Stop it!" Yuriko said her tone hysterical. "He's still hurt! My son is still hurting, please stop!"

Toshiro sighed when Jason and Jun pulled Taki away from him.

His wound burned like crazy. He met Taki's angry gaze and took in a deep breath. Calm slipped in as he realized Taki's anger wasn't hateful. It came from elsewhere, and wasn't meant for him. That anger came from some place deeper, and darker than his past...Toshiro shivered.

"Are you done?" Jun asked him. "If you're done we need to sit down and come up with a plan that works."

Taki's dark eyes held his and he frowned when he read amusement.

_Shit!_ _He_ still hated Taki's guts.

Jason touched his shoulder, jerking him away from the anger pit.

"We have to check your bandage," Jason said. "Let's go to the bathroom."

"Yes, go tend to his highness," Taki said then.

Toshiro gritted his teeth and pushed off the wall, his left hand on his abdomen. He ignored Taki's taunt and allowed Jason to lead him to the bathroom. His mother hovered, her eyes bright with worry.

"What's wrong with you?" Jason demanded the moment he closed the bathroom leaving his mother outside. "You want to see me worry until I die. Do you want to see me die too? Is that it? Is that what you want?"

Toshiro sat on the stool next to an open towel cupboard. He pulled out the gun from the small of his back and placed it on a bundle of towels. He turned to look at Jason with a sigh.

"Oh no, don't give me that pleading look. I'm canceling those pretty eyes of yours with reality. You let that guy goad you into a fight. You didn't stop to think about your wound. For all I know you've ripped out all the stitches. God, can you imagine what it's like for your mom to watch you fight. It isn't pretty, you know. She almost came undone."

Jason turned on the water at the sink and grabbed two small wash clothes.

"I can't bear to see you with new bruises. That guy wasn't being kind. He actually punched you in the stomach. Why don't you think about yourself, Toshiro? If not for your sake, then do it for me. It's painful to see you hurt. Do you even know that? Huh? Do you know I can't stand to see all those scars on you? I just want to erase them and keep you safe, yet you—

"I'm sorry." Toshiro cut in.

"Damn straight you better be sorry."

Jason came to crouch before him and started undoing the old bandage around his stomach.

"I told you before, you have to stop fighting."

Toshiro sighed. With care, he leaned forward and cupped Jason's face. He kissed Jason then. Kissed him because no matter what happened now, his life now belonged to Jason. He wanted to listen to Jason's tirades on a daily basis. He wanted to have Jason worry about him for the rest of his life. His heart ached with love for this man.

He broke the kiss and leaned back to stare into surprised green eyes. A soft gasp escaped when Jason touched his cheeks to come away with wetness.

"Hey," Jason wiped tears from Toshiro's eyes. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to go off on you—

"That's not why," he said, sitting back, a bit mortified that he could cry. He'd thought his tears gone. "I'm not used to anyone caring what I do, whether I hurt...I—

He broke off and smiled at Jason.

"I love you."

Jason studied him for a moment. "I hope that means you'll listen to what I say."

Toshiro laughed then. A strange phenomena, tears and laughter all at one go, only with Jason. He nodded in answer.

"Good. Now stay still, I have to fix your bandages. You'd better not have ripped your stitches out." Jason finished removing the bandage and threw it into the trash. "You really have to start listening to me, babe."

"I'll do my best, my love."

"I sense a 'but' in that answer."

Toshiro sighed.

"I might have to get into trouble one last time, Jason."

When Jason started to protest, Toshiro touched his lips with a finger.

"One last time, then I'll go back to Penn Yan with you for life."

Jason studied him for a moment before he continued changing the dressing.

Toshiro watched Jason work in silence. When Jason finished the dressing, he sat back and green eyes held his.

"Was your father right about our lives being in danger with Kaito alive?"

"Yes." There was no use hiding the truth. "Kaito will want revenge for his family's dishonor. It is the way."

"Do you trust your father?" Jason asked him then.

Toshiro frowned.

"I don't trust anyone except you, Jason. I need you to go to Penn Yan while I'm away."

"You're going to do what your father says though?" Jason asked.

"Trust that I'll find a way to survive." Toshiro shifted on the seat. "I'm marrying you, right? I'll come back to you."

Jason studied him for a moment before he moved to hold him.

"I'll go help Sean plan our wedding. So, don't stand me up," Jason said then.

Toshiro couldn't help the smile at the talk of weddings, especially one that would include him. He held Jason tight.

"I promise," he said, his tone quiet.

"I won't forgive you if you break that promise," Jason warned. "I'll haunt you even in your afterlife."

Toshiro laughed against Jason chest. His heart skipped when Jason kissed him giving him even more reason to return to Jason.

***

Two hours later, Toshiro tugged the zipper of his leather jacket closed. He walked beside his father on his way to meet Michael Baron. Taki walked ahead of him.

"Why do you trust him?" he asked Jun.

"I knew his parents." Jun turned to look at him then. "Ryu Takumi killed them when Taki was in grade school. He wanted their land, so he adopted Taki into the clan. When I was searching for you, I found him first. We joined forces. It took him the better part of a decade to find out about you."

Toshiro returned his gaze to Taki. "He's been a bastard to me."

"He feared to show any form of recognition toward you. As you know, had Mako found out he was working with me she would have killed him. Worse, she'd have killed you."

"Still," Toshiro shook his head. It was hard reconciling the bastard Taki he knew with the one vowing to protect him now. Very difficult. Shaking off thoughts about Taki, he thought about his father's easy way with their life. "You've turned into one of us."

"There is no us, or them," Jun Natake said. "I've become what I needed to find you."

"And what is that?"

"I'm cleaning up the Takumi clan."

"With Mako dead, Kaito is the last of the clan." Toshiro pointed out. "What do you do after?"

"Get to know you," Jun said simply. "Put our family back together and help your mother. I've been cruel to her in the past. I have a lot to make up."

They walked in silence for a while. It felt surreal, walking with his father. The city was busy, as always. Not caring what a momentous moment this was for him. His father...he sighed.

"I—

He started then stopped because they were approaching the rendezvous point. He'd left Jason with a single kiss; none of them had dared do more in front of his parents and Taki. Once he met Michael, he didn't know how long he'd have before he returned to Jason. He stopped and turned to look at his father.

"I'm grateful you kept looking for me. I've wondered what my father would be like. I was even envious of Kaito when I saw him with Ryu Takumi. I'm glad it's you."

He looked down the street.

Taki waited at the entrance to the alley they'd chosen. Working with Taki would be like returning to his old life. He'd have to shed everything Jason had given him to get through it. He sighed and returned his gaze back to his father.

"Can I entrust Jason to you?"

"Toshiro—

"He's the most precious thing in my life. The only one," Toshiro said with a frown. "I think you understand."

Jun held his gaze then nodded with a hard swallow. "Jason will want for nothing."

Toshiro read the promise in Jun's eyes.

"Thank you."

Jun glanced at Taki then.

"They're waiting for you."

"Yeah," Toshiro said.

He studied his father one last time. Jun Natake was one interesting man. He started toward Taki thinking he wanted to meet Jun again.

***

"I don't trust you," Toshiro told Taki when he reached him.

"That's coz you don't like me."

"Can you blame me?" Toshiro demanded as they turned into the alley. "Are you going to shoot me when I'm not looking?"

"I hate your guts, but I won't shoot you for your father's sake. He's helped me a lot."

Toshiro glanced at Taki.

"You insulted my mother when you and fucking Sakura were holding me."

"Is that the only insult you remember? I punched you too."

"Yeah well, you owe my mother an apology."

Taki chuckled.

"You keep laughing, and I'll punch your teeth in."

"You've already head butted my nose."

"You deserved it for what you said about my mother," Toshiro said. "It's worse because you knew who she was."

"You're such an annoying brat. Have always been," Taki complained.

Toshiro shrugged.

"You've been a hell of a bastard. I don't see how that's changed now that you're on the other side."

Toshiro sighed when he saw Michael waiting. The man looked older. This case was sucking the energy from him.

"We can't trust anyone inside," Toshiro said then.

"I understand," Taki replied.

Toshiro smiled when Michael reached for his gun.

"I hope you're ready for this."

"I hope you are," Takino said.

"Hey fellas," Michael said then with a smile. "Toshiro, you brought me a friend."

"I've changed my mind," Toshiro said. "I'm won't testify. Arrest me. Life is getting too dangerous out here."

Michael gave a grim nod and pulled out handcuffs.

"I'm not sure this is the best choice, Toshiro. Whatever you're up to, you're about to have a really hard time."

Toshiro held out his wrists.

"Story of my life."

***

Jason paced the length of his shop floor making customers nervous with each glance he threw outside the windows. Toshiro was late. He'd promised a week. One week, and he'd be back in Penn Yan. The one week had turned into two, almost three. He couldn't think. He was afraid Michael Baron was going to show up to tell him the worst. He sighed and wiped a hand down his unshaven face.

What was he supposed to do without Toshiro?

"Jason, have coffee with me."

He turned to find Yuriko standing a few feet away holding one of the mugs from his kitchen upstairs. She was smiling at him. He wondered why when she should worry too. Her son wasn't back yet. How could she smile?

"Come on," she urged, waving a hand over the coffee to entice him with the scent. "It smell good, right? I make good coffee."

Her English was getting good thanks to Sean and Claire. They spend the day correcting her. His stomach rejected the idea of food. Worry had taken residence there and food felt wrong. He couldn't eat without knowing how Toshiro was doing.

"I don't want coffee."

"You don't want coffee, or food, or sleep for past two weeks. Neglecting health won't make this easy. Take it from someone who knows. Now follow me, or I pinch your ear and drag you away."

Jason laughed because the thought of her pinching him and dragging him away by the ear was too comical. He took the mug she held out, and acknowledged that she made the best coffee when the first sip left him with a zing.

Sean had gone home to his husband earlier. Claire, his store helper was doing inventory behind the counter, checking out customers leisurely. There wasn't anything for him to do down here but pace, so he followed Yuriko upstairs to his loft.

Upstairs, she led him to his kitchen where she'd baked chocolate chip cookies. He sat on a stool at the high table staring at them.

How had she known?

"I find chocolate in your writing desk by the window. I figure you must like chocolate."

He stared at her in shock, her words so similar to Toshiro's a lifetime ago. Toshiro had presented him with chocolate cookies then too. Their gooey taste still fresh in his mind though the time he'd spent with Toshiro at the Watson house was so far away.

Gods, how did they manage staying apart again?

'Coz he wasn't surviving this at all. He was falling apart inside.

Falling apart with worry...he pushed the chocolate chip cookies away.

"How long?" he asked.

Yuriko understood his question.

"Michael won't tell us much. He say they found mole in office, after they tried to hurt Toshiro in prison. Afterwards, Toshiro met with judge, and promised to give up clan money. Michael say they're cleaning up the mess the case has caused. My husband not know when it ends."

"Toshiro?" Jason asked. "Why can't I talk to him?"

"Because, he insists you be safe," Yuriko said. "I stay with you until he come back. My husband takes care of him for both of us. I hope Jun call this evening with good news."

"It's not enough." Jason stared into his coffee. "I want him back."

"I want him out too," Yuriko said. "We have to stay strong, Jason."

_Strong was difficult_ , Jason thought.

It was hard when the one man you loved was in danger. He couldn't remember the last time he'd taken a breath without fear. He stayed up in bed afraid to sleep in case Toshiro called him.

He'd promised to plan a wedding, but he couldn't even look at the invitations without wanting to puke. If Toshiro didn't make it...he closed his eyes.

"Sean is planning a wedding I'm afraid might not happen."

"Have _some_ faith," Toshiro said into the room.

Jason jumped off his seat turning to stare at Toshiro. He could barely believe the sight of him standing at the kitchen door with a small smile. Dressed in a green t-shirt and black jeans, Toshiro looked well, _alive!_

_Gods,_ he looked good.

Jason rushed to pull Toshiro into his arms. Holding him tight, he buried his face into Toshiro's loose hair.

Was this real?

_It better be_ , he prayed. _It better be._

Toshiro rubbed his back.

"I need to breathe, babe."

Jason chuckled and released his hold slightly, very slightly. Gods every part of him was shaking with relief.

"Are you here to stay?" he asked, when he could speak without bursting into an emotional mess.

"Until you get tired of me," Toshiro answered in a whisper. "And even then...I won't let you chase me away."

Jason smiled wide and lifted Toshiro into his arms whirling around in happiness.

"Welcome home."

***

"Welcome home," Jason said his tone happy.

Goodness, those words healed every hurt in his body, his soul. Toshiro held on to Jason feeling complete. The last two weeks disappeared when he was in Jason's arms. They disappeared and became a blur.

He closed his eyes and breathed in Jason's clean scent. This clean wave of love that permeated all the dark spaces in his heart, he drew it in like a starving animal. How he'd missed Jason.

They held each other for a long time, lost in each other's arms.

"Can I interrupt?"

He lifted his head from Jason's shoulder to find his mother standing a few feet away. She looked left out in the moment. Her gaze was unsure as she looked at him with longing, she wringed her hands together.

Jason let go of him and stepped back.

"Your Mom worried too."

Toshiro nodded. It wasn't easy, but he crossed the distance between him and his mother. For a full awkward minute, he wondered how to go about hugging her. She looked too delicate, too clean...

She moved, suddenly wrapping him in a cloud of flowers. She dragged his head to her shoulder, and he had to bend his knees slightly to accommodate her short stature. She held him tight. It was a different hug from Jason's, so warm.

Toshiro closed his eyes, as he finally understood what mothers did for their children. Her comfort was in her touch, the way she stroked a gentle hand through his hair. It felt priceless, precious.

"My son," she whispered and instead of ripping grief for what he'd missed without her, he felt peace.

***

That night, Jason made love to him in _their_ great big bed.

Jason called it _their_ bedroom, _their_ loft.

That easily, Jason shared all he had with him. It undid him, remade him. Lying on his back, Jason above him, driving him insane with love, he wondered how he could have ever thought to live without this.

Toshiro threw his head back caught in a tide of passion. Jason's hands slid over his chest, sending heat burning through him. Jason's full length surged into him, scraping that bundle of nerves inside him that turned him into quivering mass. He bit his lip, biting back his moan.

His mother was in the next room.

Jason dragged fingers into his hair and took his mouth in a hot kiss. Jason surged into him faster, drawing more moans. It turned him on, when Jason swallowed his moans, kissing him as they plunged into a fast ride. He came with a muffled shout when Jason reached between them and stroked him. Floating in a cloud of ecstasy, he felt Jason come inside him, sending delicious thrills surging through his body.

Jason collapsed on top of him with a happy sigh.

Toshiro wrapped his arms around him, running his fingers over Jason's sleek back down to his ass. He closed his eyes when he felt Jason move inside him. His body responded with happy thrills.

"I don't want to miss this again." Jason kissed his collarbone. "Don't leave me again."

"I won't." Toshiro promised kissing him. "I missed you too."

Jason sighed and braced himself above him. The lights were on, dispelling any shadows in the room. Jason's green eyes left him breathless. He reached up to feel Jason's stubble against his fingers. He'd dreamt of this every night when he'd been in prison. Two weeks of confinement and he'd wanted nothing to do with jail time ever again.

"You've gone away from me. Where are you?" Jason asked then. "What are you thinking about?"

Toshiro met green eyes and smiled.

"How much you mean to me."

He sighed when Jason slipped out of him, feeling like he'd lost a part of him.

Jason rolled to the side and propped his head up with his left hand to study him.

"I want you to tell me what happened."

He turned to his right needing Jason's closeness.

"Do I have to? Can't we just forget it? We're getting married soon. Starting a new life—

"You might want to forget but you keep thinking about it. It was hard for me too. I need to know what happened."

Toshiro sighed and reached up to touch Jason's jaw.

"It's all so dark."

"Just tell me, Toshi."

Toshiro dropped his hand away because he knew Jason wouldn't let it go. Jason had waited all afternoon to ask. He'd told them that Michael had released him, but what it had taken...even Jun had wanted to spare Yuriko. They'd sugarcoated the story for his mother and Jason during dinner. It was nice to have Jun's support. His father was a man he was proud to know.

"Please, Toshi, don't shut me out now. You were arrested," Jason started for him. "Taken to jail with that Taki guy, did he come out too?"

Toshiro sighed and sat up. He wished he could get a drink for this tale.

"No, Taki didn't make it," he said. He shifted until he was propped against the headboard. "He died killing Kaito."

Jason sat up too and waited. It was the way he waited that made Toshiro love him even more.

Toshiro closed his eyes remembering Taki's sacrifice. Taki, who he'd hated, had died freeing him from a lifetime of trouble.

"Michael booked us in as planned. He made sure they placed us in the same block as Kaito. I was nervous because the news of Mako's death would have reached Kaito. Taki and I had the same cell. Taki's goal was to get Kaito, but that changed when someone tried to strangle me our first night. The mole in Michael's office had friends."

"I didn't eat anything for two days." Toshiro shook his head remembering the fear of walking among the inmates. "I was sure they'd try to poison me that way. Taki smuggled food for me on the second day from the kitchen. I still don't know how he managed that. We hadn't met Kaito yet and someone had tried to strangle me in my bed. The other tried to throw me from the fifth block down to the ground head fast. If it weren't for Taki, I don't think I'd have made it."

Jason hissed and shifted on the bed. Toshiro forced himself not to look at Jason.

"Michael worked a deal with the warden. The third night they caught the guard who opened our cell and the inmate who wanted to stab me to death. The two gave up the mole in Michael's office. Kaito emerged from solitary the fourth day after they arrested Michael's mole. Kaito wasn't happy."

"How did Taki die?" Jason asked.

Toshiro rubbed his eyes wishing to wipe out the horrid memories.

"I tried to get him to calm down when Kaito showed up. Kaito came straight to find us, like the enraged beast he was. He wanted to kill me, payback for his mother's death. I didn't do it, and he knew, but still he wanted to kill me. His hate was hard to take."

Jason took his hand and squeezed.

"Why?"

"I know your relationship with Sean was different from mine and Kaito but, imagine Sean hating you. Would it be easy?"

Jason shook his head in understanding.

Toshiro wondered how Jason could understand. Kaito's form of love was darker. Seeing him again had dragged Toshiro back to his past. Back to the young boy who grew up wanting to please Kaito. Seeing Kaito's anger had almost driven him to beg for forgiveness.

That he'd even contemplated begging forgiveness made him feel dirty sitting so close to Jason. He didn't want to spoil the love he had with Jason. It was so pure, so unsullied.

"Before Kaito stabbed me, I thought I loved him. I really did, I would have done anything for Kaito, Jason. Had done things for him," he broke off because he understood that wasn't love. "Looking at him again in that place, I felt disgust for me, for him, what we've done together. My life shouldn't have happened that way."

"And poor Taki, his rage against Kaito was so deep. The Takumi family had killed his parents. Slain them in front of him, for land, it drove Taki crazy in that place. The rage, it ate away at him. I kept wondering why, but I shouldn't wonder, Jason. I should understand his rage, shouldn't I? Taki made me realize I had no idea what a parent really is, Jason. Aren't I pitiful?"

Toshiro sighed.

"I've had such dark thoughts. I wonder what you see in me."

Toshiro looked away from Jason's empathic gaze. Perhaps Jason's goodness couldn't allow him to see the dark side inside Toshiro. The dark side that still lurked inside, it worried Toshiro.

"Taki planned his move without letting me know." Toshiro shook his head. "I wanted Michael to get us out of there. I wanted to save Taki, even if it meant living on the run. Taki's rage was hard to take. I just wanted to take him away from there. Jail is hard, Jason. So hard. I tried my best to have Michael move fast but I was too late."

"Taki woke up very early on our sixth day. I woke up to find him gone, so I went searching. I found them in the showers. Kaito's head smashed into the toilet bowl, he'd bled out on the wet floor. He didn't go without a fight. Taki sat on the floor with two stab wounds in his stomach. He kept saying ' _tell Jun you're free now'_. I tried to stop the bleeding but," Toshiro stared at his hands remembering the blood, "so much blood. I could do nothing...I could do nothing."

Jason pulled him into his arms, holding him tight. Toshiro felt a soft kiss against his temple.

"It wasn't your fault. Taki chose his path."

"I could have saved him. Tried to understand him," Toshiro sighed. "I couldn't see past my own anger with him."

"I'm happy he freed you," Jason said. "There was nothing to do for him, Toshi."

Toshiro breathed in Jason, hoping to shift the darkness inside him.

"After that, Michael moved me. There was no urgency in the case now that Kaito was dead. However, he needed to get me free. So, I took him to the money. There's a man without a name who does banking for people like us. It's dangerous to bring along an agent, so it took convincing that I wasn't after him but Takumi money. That's where I was this past week. When it was over, and Michael was safe, I spent two days avoiding my father. It was hard getting back to my past. I missed you, but I wasn't sure you should have to live with someone like me."

He felt Jason stiffen under him. They both knew if he'd wanted, he'd have disappeared and never returned.

Toshiro had thought about letting Jason go, allowing his parents to go too....but he was selfish. His heart wouldn't let him. He'd wanted the life Jason promised.

"What changed your mind?" Jason asked in a whisper.

"You," Toshiro answered matching Jason's tone. "You rescued me, you know. Showed me a different life, something I'd never seen before. I'm sure you're the only reason I feel anything for my parents. Without you, I don't know if I'd understand them. I really want to know what the whole family thing is about...and I can't do that without you. So, I'm being selfish here."

He shifted away from Jason to meet amused green eyes.

"What are you thinking?" Toshiro demanded.

Jason rubbed away his frown with a gentle thumb.

"I see you, Toshi. Your heart, it's very beautiful."

Toshiro scoffed.

"You must really love that word, beautiful."

Jason nodded.

"I love you, Toshi."

Toshiro beamed.

"I love you, too."

Jason let out a relieved happy sigh.

"Let's get married tomorrow."

"That's a big thing, you know. People don't just decide, let's get married tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," Jason insisted. "I can't watch Sean plan this wedding any longer. He's getting out of control. Your parents are in town. Why not get married?"

"What about your mother?"

"She's a phone call away."

"But I haven't met her, what if she—

Toshiro shifted on the bed so that he was kneeling.

"What if she hates me?"

"She has no choice but to love you. You're going to be my husband."

Toshiro smiled then his heart so full at that simple title: not a gangster, criminal or a bad guy, but a husband to Jason. He could live with that.

"Toshiro?"

He flung himself into Jason's arms.

"Yes, to whatever you say, Jason. I'm yours."

***

Their wedding was small, intimate.

Jason's friends, Sean's friends, Toshiro's parents who held hands tight through the ceremony. The Watsons who he'd finally met. Jason's mother and her husband, a nice man who had a wonderful smile. Jason's mom hugged Toshiro tight and called him her son.

Jason's people, becoming his people, Toshiro's heart squeezed tight at that gift.

He'd stumbled through a forest at the start, bleeding to death, with no one to care. He met green eyes and smiled. This man had rescued him that night in more ways than one. Jason had given him a place to belong.

Jason, his lover, his friend, his family, his heart...his rescuer, he didn't know what lay ahead, but he belonged here now. In this small town in Penn Yan, this small magical place that he was now part of forever.

He smiled as Jason slipped a ring on his left ring finger. He smiled harder when he saw the design, a curved snake to match his tattoo. Except this ring was crafted by Jason with love.

_What a man,_ he thought slipping a solid white gold band on Jason's finger.

Yes, this was his place, right beside Jason. He'd struggled to find it, but now that he was here, it felt damn good. His heart swelled with happiness when Jason kissed him, and their family and friends clapped in joy.

***

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Thank you for reading this e-book. If you liked this story, do check out these other stories by Suilan Lee.

Other e-books

Electric Blue & Catnip

You Make Me...Crazy

Blu Dream

Kiss Me to Spring Time

The Precious Teahouse

That Dog, Young Jae

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About Author:

Suilan Lee was born in a small town in South Korea, and grew up moving from one city to another. She works with an aide organization, teaching others ways of making their lives better. In her spare time, she loves writing romance stories, set in different cities with characters who live ordinary lives and fight for extraordinary love and happiness. She believes in a happy ending and will always work toward making one happen.

Connect with her -

Twitter: @LeeSuilan

Blog: Suilan Lee Fiction
