Oh dear. I'm losing my mind
Hello humans. My name is Dael Kingsmill and today I am here back again with another
mythology story for you. That was bizarrely
violent for an opening
Let's just let's just-- just breeze on past that
That I have no real rhyme or reason for why I have selected this story to tell you this week
I just wanted to tell it
I just felt like telling it so let's go straight on ahead and get into the story of
Asclepius. After getting it on with Apollo, a woman named Coronis assumes that this isn't gonna be some grand
dramatic classical romance. I mean she's heard the stories. She knows what Apollo is like
He's not exactly into that monogamy thing so she's just not gonna make a whole big thing out of it. You know
She's just gonna, just let it be. So she just thinks you know. Oh, wasn't that nice, that was nice,
wasn't it? Alright? Now...
I'll just go and get married to this other fellow from my hometown
Because I mean it's not as if Apollo and her were gonna stay together, this is Greek mythology
They weren't gonna stay together
But Apollo finding out about this either because he's psychic and had a vision
or because a crow came and was gossiping in his direction about it
"LOL can't keep a woman. Can't keep a woman." I can't do a crow, I can do parrot. That's the best crow I have got
*crow skwarking*
Crows.
And so anyway Apollo like singes the crow
And that's why it's black now instead of white. Which was apparently its original color because he's like shoot the messenger dammit
I'm gonna shoot all the messengers I want. But anyway Apollo is very hurt by Coronis's decision to, you know,
do what he was gonna do anyway and so he cries about it a lot...
And he gets his sister Artemis to go and exact revenge on Coronis for him and so Artemis, to get her brother's revenge
goes and like
horribly murders Coronis and a bunch of all of her neighbors just for no real reason in a massive bloodbath. Everybody's dead
Everybody's dead, Dave!
And so Artemis and Apollo and Hermes are piling up all the bodies on to funeral pyres and as the flames lick around
And start burning at Coronis's body
Apollo goes: "Oh wait, yeah...
You know I should probably get my get my unborn son out of there right, right? I should probably do that.
Hermes!
Could you get the baby out of the womb for me?"
I swear this guy can't do anything for himself, but of course now that Apollo has the baby
He doesn't know what the hell to do with it. He doesn't know what the hell to do with the baby
What's he gonna do with the baby? "Chiron?
You have raised and tuted babies before right? You do that a bunch! Here!
Have... Have a baby.
What's it called? Oh, uhhh...
Damn hadn't thought of that, um...
Well, you know we had to uh we had to cut it out of its mother
so I mean like
Asclepius
That sounds namie, right?"
Asclepius means to cut open so that's where he got his name from from there. So Chiron, the centaur,
raises and tutors this demigod in his cave as he has so often done throughout mythology and in particular
he teaches Asclepius about the art of
medicine and as he got older Asclepius developed this art and he
mastered it to a
sheer perfection
like
to the point where he could heal the dead
He just got so psyched about how good he was at this healing gig, at this this medicine thing
that he just
He became a necromancer and he just starts reviving dead peeps all over the place
No matter what the ailment no matter how extreme
He could fix it
What's that....? Hippolytus killed by a big wave with a seal on it that frightened him and made him crash
his chariot
No problem. I'll just patch that up real quick [PING]
Alive again!
Capaneus zapped by an angry Zeus for shouting about how much better he is than the king of the Gods while
scaling a ladder at the wall of Thebes
That's nothing... no big... All I need is a little de-zappafication [PING]
[PING] alive again! People who drowned people who've been
splattered and crushed, people who've been chopped up into little tiny pieces and sprinkled into a stew! none of it mattered
Nothing was beyond
Asclepius's necromantic
powers
Buuuut, pretty quickly Hades got sick-ly of
Asclepius poaching all of his underworld citizens, and he lodged a formal complaint
Zeus didn't want to deal with any of this nonsense. He never wants to deal with any of this nonsense!
You know he's got skeez-bagging to do! a very full schedule
of skeez-bagging and so he just zapped Asclepius to death down into the Underworld with his lightning bolt
Too bad Asclepius couldn't de-zappification-ify himself
But now Apollo was supes mad about everything, but he can't fight Zeus for multiple reasons
So instead he takes it out on the Cyclopseseseez. Cyclopes.
The-- The Cyclopsss...es... Because you see
One of them had invented the thunderbolt weapon for Zeus during the Titanomachy
the war against the Titans, way back in the day
So getting revenge on just a whole bunch of their race
was... was sound logic!
Mm.
But now Poseidon's all upset because Apollo has killed one or more of his sons. So now Zeus is like "ugh
Seriously?!
Seriously?  You gotta start killing your cousins? You gotta start bringing this into the family? You can't kill family members..
Now we gotta come up with an actual punishment for you. Like I'm this close
to sending you to Tartarus." As if Zeus hadn't just killed
a family memb-- uh--I don-- this is yo--
And so this punishment is how Apolllo ended up
indentured to Admetus which I talked about a while back in a different video and all the adventures that occurred therein
So if you haven't seen that video
And you won't know what happens immediately after this part of the story you can click right over here to go and see you what?
happens also, I'll put a link in the description b'low
thed'scrip'nb'low. ble ble.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed that story if you did I would really really love it if you could hit that like button and share
This video on your favorite show media website or in person or whatever just sharing you know sharing the love
Sharing the love and in fact if you're on social Media and you would be interested in Following me on social media
You can find all my links for those places in the description below
B'low. Bloh. Blehh.
and before I forget because they almost certainly will forget the deadline for the new loot crate theme for
Next month is coming up in just a couple of days, so this theme is combat, and if you are interested in in that area
Of geekdom so like fighting games, um, I know there's a lot of blizzard stuff going on in there
There's hunger games and repping hunger games yeah with my mockingjay pin. This was actually given to me by Omar's mom
Um!
So if you're interested in that kind of thing you might want to consider
Signing up for loot crate now so that you can get some of those goodies
and if you would like to do that, then you can use the url
Lootcrate.com/Kingsmill I believe *laughs*
I'm trying to remember my details correctly and if you use the discount code "human" then you'll get 10% off
So that's a nice way if you've been umming and ahhing and tossing up whether you want to get loot crate
That's a way that you can save a bit of money on it
And I can get a bit of money from it and it's like "oh, it all balances out and it's lovely" so yes
Loot crate you have until the 19th to sign up if you want to get the combat, loot crate that is coming up for December
That's the month right? what month are we in?
November?
one of them end months
For now I do believe that's it, I'm done, email this to your grandma, and I will see you some other time.
*strange gaspy noise*
*Plinkety music*
We're just gonna keep on keep on y'all keep on trucking just keep on keeping on
