(HBO THEME PLAYS)
(CLEARS THROAT)
Should I look at the... (GRUNTS)
camera or you?
INTERVIEWER:
You can just talk to me.
Can you introduce yourself?
Sure. Yeah, um...
Uh, my name is Richard Hendricks
and I'm the--
My name is Richard Hendricks,
and--
-INTERVIEWER: Just...
-My name is Richard Hendricks.
I'm, uh, the founder and CEO
of Pied Piper.
I think like most people,
I first heard about Pied Piper
at TechCrunch Disrupt.
Middle-out was a game changer.
ANNOUNCER: The winner
of this year is Pied Piper.
What you have to understand is,
conventional compression
was like rubbing two sticks
together.
And along comes Pied Piper
 out of nowhere
with a fricking blowtorch.
It seemed like they really had
their act together.
I thought about acquiring them,
uh, but I guess
I got distracted.
INTERVIEWER: So, when did you
first hear about Pied Piper?
You mean when did I hear
someone had first stolen
my Nucleus project?
Well we had really just started,
um, a few months earlier.
And, like a bunch of other
Silicon Valley companies,
 we were just working
 out of a garage.
Or a house...
-INTERVIEWER: Nice place?
-No.
Those early days
of Pied Piper...
kinda sucked. (SIGHS)
We had to clean for ourselves.
 It was like a shit hole.
But there was so much shit
 in it,
it was filled all the way up.
So, it was like level
with the ground.
If that's true,
there was a little meniscus...
in the shit, and that's where...
our dreams lived.
One of my favorite things
is to just be napping,
and then to wake up
and have people around.
And that used to happen
all the time
when I was homeless, but...
(INHALES) this was like that,
but with shelter.
I think they all abided
by the same rule
to like shower every other day.
So, it smelled a lot.
Uh, like BO.
And, um, you know,
they didn't have money,
so they--
they didn't have a cleaner.
Uh, and Lord knows
they weren't going to clean,
so there was, um, you know,
a good layer of filth
just on the ground.
Not the kind of house you want
to take your shoes off in.
Um, and, uh, yeah,
just fucking smelled.
Really bad.
It was all right.
Jian-Yang won the house from me
in a game of chance.
He told me to pick a number
 between one and ten.
I picked seven, um,
but it was three.
Hmm, you live you learn,
now I'll always pick three.
The fucking weird thing
about that house,
I never saw any chicks
in that house.
 Never any.
 It was all just a bunch
 of fucking lame dudes.
They should have been bathing
in fucking she-ju...
like she-jizz, she-goo.
Like, fucking, like,
you know... like knuckle lube.
INTERVIEWER: There was
one guy though, right?
Oh, yeah...
Yeah, that guy fucked.
It was Camelot...
It was Narnia.
It was Waco,
and Richard was our dashing,
feather-haired David Koresh.
And we were his wives.
But we chose to be there.
It was kind of impressive.
How-- how he found
different ways to fuck up.
He fucked things up
over and over and over.
Yeah, I-- I met Richard
at, uh, a talk
that Peter Gregory was giving
and he pitched Peter Gregory
a music recognition app
that was fucking awful.
Uh, and... it ended up
becoming Pied Piper.
So, what the fuck do I know?
(ALARM BUZZES)
When people ask me
about Pied Piper,
I always tell them
the same thing...
Are there other questions?
Uh, yeah, can you elaborate?
Yes.
Will you?
Uh... hmm...
INTERVIEWER: So, you worked
with Laurie Bream?
-Mm-hmm.
-Uh, we spoke to Laurie,
she actually referred
to you as her best friend.
(SMACKS LIPS) Laurie Bream said
that I was her best friend?
INTERVIEWER: Yeah.
Oh.
(STUTTERS) Fuck, I--
I don't have to like
go visit her now, do I?
We had knocked around
for a few years,
trying different iterations
of what we wanted to do.
It was at RussFest when things
 really got crazy for us.
RussFest was the rock-hard cock
that jizzed Pied Piper
 -onto the world's tits.
-(LAUGHS)
DINESH CHUGTAI:
 It was so much money.
It was so much money
that I actually looked into
how much money it would take
to fill up a swimming pool
so I could swim in money
like Scrooge McDuck.
Not as much money
as you'd think.
It would have been
an all hands-on deck
at Yankee Candle.
(CHUCKLES) Because I would've--
I would've ordered up a storm.
There were a couple Soviet
submarines I had my eye on.
To me it wasn't about the money,
I just wanted to, you know,
be able to put it
in people's faces.
Like I wanted to go home
for Thanksgiving
and say to my sister, like,
"Oh, cool,
you're the fanciest girl
in Mommy and Me?
Well fuck you,
I'm a billionaire.
And fuck Daren too."
Such a fucking asshole,
that mother fucker.
Yeah... times were good.
 They call it PiperNet,
and it's coming to your phone.
 Tomorrow at noon,
 the Pied Piper app
will go live on the latest
 5G-equipped iOS
 and Android phones
 in ten major cities
 across the country.
 AT&T says,
"If things go as planned,
PiperNet could be on more than
 a half billion devices
 within a year."
And no one is more excited
than technology super fans.
-Like the ones behind me...
-(CHEERS)
...who are camping out all night
 to snag
 a limited-edition,
Pied Piper-equipped smartphone.
If their enthusiasm is anything
 to go by,
 then a lot more people
 may soon be lining up
 to pay the Piper.
(CHUCKLES)
 I'm Jim Gitman, KCTW.
-I am Pied Piper.
-I am Pied Piper.
-I am Pied Piper.
-I am Pied Piper.
I am Pied Piper.
We are Pied Piper!
INTERVIEWER: Day of the launch,
half-an-hour to go.
What, uh, what was going
through your head?
Yeah, I mean all--
All indications pointed
to... a successful launch.
Sorry do you have--
Do we have water?
JARED DUNN:
I mean he was the most relaxed
 I'd ever seen him.
He had the-- the cool,
confident swagger
of a young Montgomery Clift...
with none of the private
sexual misery.
Well, maybe a little.
Oh, yeah, I-- I was sure
it was gonna work
right from the beginning.
It-- pretty sure.
Most of the time.
We were all pretty nervous.
Especially Dinesh.
He shat his pants.
I chose to not be there
because to me,
I never did this for the fame
or the adulation, you know.
To me, it's always been about
the work.
God, to be around me
during that time.
I must have been so annoying.
I was just walking around
chest bumping any bro I could...
get my chest against.
INTERVIEWER: So, uh, what do
you remember about the launch?
(CLICKS TONGUE) Um,
there were some dogs...
that did some tricks,
and a sports guy.
Would you say that Pied Piper
is your MVP?
 Most valuable phone?
 Yeah, I would.
-(CHEERING)
-He was tall, um...
Can't remember what sport
he played.
But... nice guy.
Uh, yeah, I was just...
trying to do everything I could
not to screw it up.
(GULPS)
REPORTER: In a fairy tale
turned nightmare come to life,
thousands of rats streamed
 onto the streets
 of San Francisco today.
 Pied Piper's phones
 broadcasting intense,
 ultrasonic sounds.
 REPORTER 2: News spin,
 we have a rat problem.
The streets of Seattle became
the streets of Sea-rattle.
And everyone was sleepless.
 Giants fans going home
 happy today
as the Cubs go down swinging
 to the-- Holy shit.
They're calling it
Rat-mageddon.
Yeah.
Except in New York,
where they're calling it
-Wednesday.
-(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)
(CHEERING)
They literally became
the Pied Piper, I mean,
you can't make that up.
What you have
to understand is...
rats.
I thought I might have
to start a--
a new division in my foundation
to deal with the wave
of rat-born disease.
When you think about a lot
of the failures in tech,
Pets.com, Theranos,
WeWork...
Pied Piper really is right
at the top of that list.
Pied Piper is just a millstone
 around AT&T's neck!
I say dump it, dump it now!
I lost so much fucking money
with those guys.
I got rat fucked.
That's a pun.
I made it all back though,
sweet investment
in the hair transplant sector.
What?
Rats, uh yes,
we have some of them here.
Figuratively.
They are dealt with.
Here's the thing about rats.
Nobody likes them.
Literally no one likes rats.
I actually prefer rats
to humans if I had the choice.
I had a pet rat
when I was a little kid.
I saw all the fucking rats,
I was like,
"Rat-up, bitches."
All these fucking chicks
screaming...
I got laid that night.
Rats are wonderful creatures.
We used them in many experiments
in the early days of Hooli.
Turns out they can withstand...
massive amounts of radiation
with minimal damage.
I mean, they live in a lab.
What do they need whiskers
and tails for anyway?
They were out for cheese
and wires.
They chewed through copper.
They chewed
through one woman's hand.
She should've moved though,
I think,
I don't want to victim blame.
Do you know how they ended up
getting rid of the rats?
INTERVIEWER:
I think they just ran away.
Where?
And so, effective immediately,
I am shutting down Pied Piper,
deleting its code repositories
 and liquidating
 its remaining assets.
All right, that's our statement.
 We will not be taking
 any further ques--
 And can I just say
 that I am just...
 truly, deeply sorry.
 Uh, this should never
 have been built.
 It is technically flawed
 to its very core.
 And we should all
remember that... forevermore.
 Sorry.
(REPORTERS CHATTERING)
 Obviously, Mr. Hendricks
 doesn't mean that
 in any legally binding
 or actionable way.
 -Get a life, guys.
-(CHATTERING CONTINUES)
It's weird.
It really seemed like
Pied Piper was going to work.
Something doesn't add up.
Heartbreaking doesn't even begin
to describe how all of us felt
about the failure of Pied Piper.
Oh, my God, oh, my God.
(GASPS) Oh, my God.
All of us... shocked.
Failure is terrible.
Unlike Dinesh,
I'm not accustomed to it.
But I do want to clarify
that I wasn't there
at the launch, so...
the failure of Pied Piper
wasn't really my fault.
INTERVIEWER: What, uh,
kind of advice would you give
to somebody experiencing
a massive public failure?
(CHUCKLES) Well I--
I've never failed.
So... I have many advice
for winners.
Um, you know my--
my career has been a trajectory
of succeeding upwards...
until I tired of being
at the top.
Well I was...
pretty embarrassed, so, I, uh...
I laid low for a little bit.
Uh, I traveled.
Richard and I went
on a world tour
to eat, pray, love.
Actually, I met, uh, Jared,
in-- in Zurich.
We went to Zurich,
we went to Amsterdam,
we went to Copenhagen.
I saw him again in, uh,
Madrid.
Richard and I went
to a flamenco show.
I begged him to try it
because I just felt that
it would unlock his body.
But, um...
He said he wanted
to stay locked.
Did not expect to see him
in Thailand, but,
uh, then, since he was there,
we did, uh,
our little Southeast Asia tour.
I felt like we were
Tegan and Sara
on the road together.
And, lo and behold,
he was on the return flight.
It was the trip of a lifetime.
I went to Tibet, actually,
to try and find Erlich.
But, uh, he was gone.
And then I came back,
but no one really wanted to hire
the guy behind Pied Piper.
Uh, however, my best friend
did hire me.
And, now I am the...
Gavin Belson Professor of, uh,
Ethics in Technology
at Stanford University.
This is all the great people
I work with.
Stanford hat.
This was when Russ Hanneman
really thought we should have...
schwag, schwag.
The schwag.
A mug.
(PAPER RUSTLING)
This is the patent...
Pied Piper had, middle-out.
May I be honest?
There was a period
of my life in which
I would have rooted
for the failure
of Richard Hendricks.
But that was a different
Gavin Belson.
That was tech icon
Gavin Belson.
Not literary icon
Gavin Belson.
 Since leaving Hooli,
 I've co-authored
 37 adult romance novels.
 Fondly Margeaux.
 The Lighthouse Dancer.
Cold Ice Cream and Hot Kisses.
Over here,
The Prince of Puget Sound.
Uh, and lastly,
 His Hazel Glance.
All international bestsellers.
Uh, G-- Gavin. Moment, please.
(SIGHS) I'm so sorry.
A moment.
-The fuck is your problem?!
-You said this would be an hour.
GAVIN BELSON: Well, we're just
running a little over.
MAN: Yeah, with the--
with the lights and the machines
and the sound equipment, how is
this ever gonna be an hour?!
GAVIN: You're acting
hysterically, all right?
We'll have plenty of time
to write this afternoon.
MAN: Yeah, you know what?
You know what?
Do your...
your little interview.
I'll just write the book myself.
GAVIN: If you could, you would.
But you can't.
You're stuck with me,
and I'm stuck with you.
MAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
That's what Slorian says
to Claudette
outside the cheese cave.
GAVIN: I forgot!
-That's our third act!
-MAN: Third act! Yes!
-Okay, go put the kettle on.
-MAN: Yeah, I'll put the kettle.
I'm terribly sorry, I'm gonna
have to cut this short.
Thank you for coming.
Ah, yes, there has been one
obvious change in my life
since then.
I have a niece.
Hmm.
BIG HEAD:
My name is, uh, Nelson Bighetti,
and I'm the president
of Stamford...
Stanford.
At first, it was really hard
to find my office
'cause it's on the second floor,
but I think I have it down now.
You just go upstairs.
You graduates have a lot
of responsibility
finishing the important work
of movements such as
pound met double zero
and Title ix.
But I feel sure
we are in good hands,
for as our motto states,
"Die-live-der-frite-wet.
Freedom blows."
Wait, that can't be right.
INTERVIEWER: Remember that?
"Uowis". Oh wait, hang on.
Oh, Simon.
Yeah, I used to play this.
Let's see.
-(MACHINE BUZZES)
-Ah, damn. A little rusty.
INTERVIEWER:
So, I think I know, but why did
they call you Big Head?
Oh yeah, just, you know,
boys being boys
and making fun of my...
my big ol' dome.
INTERVIEWER: It's not because
your last name is "Bighetti"?
I'm the co-founder of Newell
Road's Strategic Technologies,
one of the largest
cyber-security firms
in the Bay Area.
I am the co-founder of Newell
Road's Strategic Technologies,
-one of the largest
cyber-security...
-I literally just said that.
-...firms...
-I just said that.
-You heard me say that.
-...in the Bay Area.
Things are better when
I say them.
Plus, they're definitely going
to edit you out.
They're not gonna use it.
Why would they use it?
That has nothing
to do with this.
Why don't tell 'em how you
bought the house next to mine
because you love me so much?
Okay. Fuck you.
How's it going, guys?
Meeting time.
-We have a meeting.
-DINESH: Mandatory.
What do I do now? I, uh,
I work for a nonprofit in D.C.
It's a-- It's a think tank and--
and we just think about stuff.
INTERVIEWER:
So, the NSA?
(LAUGHS) The NSA? No, no, no.
Farthest thing from the NSA.
God. NSA, that's...
that's a really weird
question to ask.
You're not-- You're not gonna
use this, are you?
-INTERVIEWER: Maybe.
-Wh-- You can't u--
You can't have people
smoking in movies, so...
Okay, JELL-O.
The old staple.
I'm afraid we don't have
kosher shrimp. Are--
Are you sure that even exists?
Guys, later, we're gonna have
a Joni Mitchell singalong.
In the rec room.
I love working with the elderly.
One, two...
 It's like I get to have
 a bunch of parents,
and also be their parent.
MARTIN: Let's go.
Hey, no. No, no, no, no, no,
no, no. Martin, Martin.
She only has eyes for you.
We were dancing as girlfriends.
That's it.
Except for Mr. O'Keefe,
who thinks I'm his late wife.
But, that's fine, too.
This fall, we actually had
a herpes epidemic
among the residents,
which is bad medically,
but from another perspective,
it's kind of touching.
Okay, we're on our way
to the hostel.
(SIGHS)
God, I haven't been there
in such a long time.
It was just an...
It was an incredible time
of my life, you know, uh...
I never really thought
that I would have
a group of male friends.
You know, men just seem
kind of mean and hard, but...
you know, these guys were just
sweet and soft as rotten fruit.
You got your book?
Prince of Puget Sound? (LAUGHS)
Oh, Judy! (CHUCKLES)
♪ (TRANQUIL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
Hey, man.
-Hey, man.
-(CHUCKLES)
You okay?
-Yeah.
-(CHUCKLES)
I haven't seen you in forever.
I saw you last weekend.
-MONICA HALL: Hi.
-DUNN: Hey.
(CHUCKLES) You look great!
Is that... Is that
a woman's scent?
No, it's unisex.
-Big Head?
-Hey, Nelson.
I work a lot with people
who have dementia
and I just want you to know
it doesn't have to be
a horror show.
Oh, cool.
Well, hey. We're all here.
-BERTRAM GILFOYLE: Let's go.
-Let's go see Jian-Yang.
-(RICHARD GRUNTS) Fine.
-You okay? Richard?!
(KNOCKS)
Uh... (CLEARS THROAT) Hi, there.
Is, uh...
Is Jian-Yang here?
Does he live here?
We're-- We're old--
Old friends of his.
No, I'm sorry.
I bought the house years ago
from his estate.
MONICA: Estate?
I'm sorry to be the one
to tell you this,
but Jian-Yang's dead.
Uh... Okay, so he's dead.
What do we do?
It's different.
But also, the same.
Hey, Gilfoyle.
That's your horrible corner.
It looks much better now.
Changed a little bit.
Fixed my hole.
-(MIMICS CRASH)
-(LAUGHS) Don't do it again.
No, I wouldn't. Obviously.
It was emotionally charged.
Look at the drapes.
That's a playful linen.
-Hi.
-STUDENT: Hey.
I used to live here.
Back when I was poor.
-Cool.
-No offense.
None taken, I guess.
-President Bighetti?
-Whoa.
-How did you know my name?
-I go to Stanford.
Oh, no way, I work at Stanford.
-I'm the president.
-Yeah, I know.
What are you doing here?
Um, I don't know.
I think 'cause Jian-Yang died.
-I'm not sure.
-Who's that?
Okay.
-My bedroom. Yeah.
-Ah, yes.
Didn't you, uh...
used to wet the bed?
Sweating. Sweating.
Stress sweats.
You can get so stressed,
you sweat at night.
And sometimes, you can...
sweat on your crotch.
So weird, we're all back here.
Except for Jian-Yang.
-Because he's dead.
-And Erlich.
Has anyone talked to Erlich?
Nope. No. But wherever he is,
I hope he hasn't blown through
all that money.
He definitely has.
Yeah. I'm sure he has.
INTERVIEWER: We're looking
for Erlich Bachman.
In the other village,
they said that he was here.
Is Erlich Bachman here?
-(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
-He's here? He's that way?
-It's up here?
-(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Erlich Bachman.
So this is
Erlich Bachman's house?
-Erlich Bachman.
-Fantastic.
We're just here to see
Erlich Bachman.
Hello.
♪ (MUSIC PLAYS FAINTLY) ♪
Hello?
♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪
Whoa, whoa. Easy. Easy.
We're friends.
Are you Erlich Bachman?
JIAN-YANG:
Yes, I'm Eric Bachman.
I can show you ID.
That's my face. I was fat.
But now, I'm not fat.
INTERVIEWER: I'm sorry,
this is supposed to be you?
Yes, my hacker hostel
was very unsuccessful.
But, uh, Richard was okay.
And my favorite, smartest...
person was Jian-Yang.
INTERVIEWER:
Do you plan on coming back
to America at any point?
JIAN-YANG: No because everyone
hates me in America.
And my best friend Jian-Yang
is dead.
INTERVIEWER: How did he die?
JIAN-YANG:
He died helping children
in Africa from the tiger.
Jian-Yang killed a tiger
and the tiger killed him
at the same time.
INTERVIEWER: That, um... that
doesn't sound like that's true.
JIAN-YANG: You're not true.
I have an idea.
-(WHISTLES)
-INTERVIEWER: Okay. Whoa.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I'm making the world
a better place
through an intelligent,
semi-autonomous agent
powered by distributed
DNA-based compute
that automates personal planning
and scheduling.
Oh, boss.
Sounds like an atrocity.
Let's just hope you have
better success than we did.
Oh, what company did you have?
-Oh, here we go.
-(CHUCKLING)
-Uh, Pied Piper.
-DINESH: Yeah.
I'm unfamiliar.
DINESH: Rat invasion?
DUNN:
We-- we were a big failure.
Eight-billion-dollar valuation
down to zero in one day.
Is that like
a social media company?
DINESH: What? Pied Piper.
GILFOYLE:
Are you fucking with us?
Thank you guys so much
for your time.
DUNN: Hey, guys.
Guess what I accidentally
brought in my bag?
♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
Oh, no way.
-DUNN: Whoops.
-(CHUCKLING)
-We know this thing.
-DINESH: Wow.
I need a beer
if we're gonna do this.
DUNN: Richard, be careful.
DINESH: Now do it.
ALL: (CHANTING) Always blue!
(LAUGHTER)
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
 RICHARD HENDRICKS:
 Regrets? Uh... no.
No, I'm-- I'm happy.
INTERVIEWER:
You don't-- You don't feel bad
that you never got to...
make the world a better place?
Uh...
I think we did okay.
DINESH:
I wouldn't change a thing.
I've learned a lot
from my mistakes.
Well, they weren't my mistakes.
I've learned a lot
from other people's mistakes.
I think we proved to everyone
the need
for less immigration
from Pakistan.
The nice thing about freezing
to death is you're preserved
in your last moment.
And if I could live forever
in the last moment
of Pied Piper...
I'd be a happy corpse.
(SOFTLY) I...
I actually could, um...
I-- I still have one copy
of the Pied Piper code base.
I have it on a thumb drive.
I could show it to you.
No, we won't-- we won't...
look into it, but um...
I just want to show it to you.
It's just got a couple things
on there that I think...
I, honestly-- this is like
when we were coding
the best we ever were.
So, some pieces of this thing
are...
sheer elegance.
I wish I could show it
to everybody
because I want to show it
to my students.
Not my classmates,
but other...
I know it was in the desk.
Okay, this is weird.
Shit. Okay. Where is it?
It's-- it's orange.
It's this big,
it's just a thumb drive,
so have you--
has anyone-- have your crew
seen it or anything?
(MUTTERING)
It isn't here? That's insa--
I have...
It's gotta be in the desk.
INTERVIEWER: Is it a problem?
Um, no. Not a problem.
It's just pretty fascinating.
Although... if it isn't here...
Where is it?
♪ (HBO THEME PLAYS) ♪
