Top of the mornin' to ya laddies!
My name is Jacksepticeye and welcome to Please Don't Touch Anything!
I just smacked my chair off my table.
Hopefully that didn't sound terrible..sorry! Uhm...
This is a game that looks really really interesting.
Uhm
It-It reminds me of Papers please.
I don't know if the guys who made that have anything to do with this game,
or if it's just inspired by it or which one came first.
I think Papers Please came first
I don't know..
But it looks really really cool. It's something that people have asked me to play
a LOT
And I was at- I was gonna play it ages and ages ago 'cause I remember buying it
during a Steam sale...and...I put it off! I just-I just didn't play it for some reason
as I tend to do. It seems to be a pattern with me
to like come back to all these games that I haven't played before but it's good!
cause I-I really wanted to try it out and i've heard some really great things about it
I have absolutely no idea what you do in it though so... "Hey man!"
"Man!" "I need to take a bathroom break, stay here for a moment"
"Wait...What is this panel for?" "Just stay here i'll be right back!"
wait what is this panel for just stay
here I'll be right back
and don't touch anything
"And don't TOUCH ANYTHING!"
Okayy...should I really not touch anything?
There's a lot of stuff that I can touch!
Uhmm...Instruction! Grab your screwdriver, grab your hammer, Work!
Th-Why is it 1, 2, 4 ,3?
1 equals 1 - er II equals 2
any one equals..
Okay, this is weird..
8x plus 3y plus 67...over...
Oh God eight squared plus 3 squared
equals D
And this is correct
upside down there's a fucking pentagram
looking symbol
Should I really not just
press anything and just stay here?
what does pressing the button do? Okay..
I-I think this is a game where there's a
bunch of secret little things everywhere
And I can touch a bunch of different shit
all the time so
What does pressin' the button actually do?
Disobedience!
achiement unlocked!
Nice!
Now the music's kickin' in..this is cool music!
I have a feeling if i press this button
the whole town's going to explode
Nothing happened!
OH I FUCKIN KNEW IT!
Ohhh why did I know that that was a big nuke button?
I love mushrooms!
Sorry! Did I-did I explode everyone?
Restart! Everyone's back to normal! So are these all the endings?
1, 2, 3, 4 ,5 ,6
7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 ,13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18
there's 18 endings ok and I think this
counts as one of them is this like is
There's 18 endings??
Okay!
And I think this counts as one of them...is this like-is there 18 things there?
Can I unscrew anything?
whoo oh this is just a pause
Okay...This is interesting! I like this!
This says 666 and the star which might correlate to this
let's do this disobedience turn on this..
What did you do last time?
You brought up a symbol before last time
I don't know
what you do
Ah, balls.
Can I press any of these?
It says grab your screwdriver and grab your hammer, but I don't SEE them!
I don't have them wherever it's at least
she just restarted every single time ok
I don't have them!
Does that literally just restart it every single time? Okay.
I was hoping that would be a secret
let's press the button again three two
3, 2, 1
Boom!
Okay...can I actually do anything after that?
Oh, pressing space just restarts it as well!
Damn it, I thought i found a secret.
So do that, turn on this
Hmm...
There probably is an ending for not
touching anything,
You could probably actually just stay here for ages and the dude will come back and be like
"What did you do?!"
Uhm
Right...so that's prepping something!
And I can't turn that off again
M-my bad!
Seriously? What?!
Okay... I can't click on anything else!
Can I click on these dudes?
Click on the...thing...is there secrets?
C'mon! There's bound to be secrets somewhere...there's always secrets somewhere...
Uhm..okay...we'll just restart. Maybe i'm not supposed to do that...
Uhm...click any of the buttons? Click this button?
no...
Oohh these look like arrows!
Can I press arrows? W, A, S, D?
Nothin'!
Help! Please! I don't know what I'm doing now!
Click on all the things! I-I'm a click on everything til it works.
Ooh!
A right button showed up when I did that!
What does that mean?
Uhhh
So down right, down left, down left, down right
Is ther-is there something..are you pointing at something that i'm able to- OHHHhhh
Hello!
So follow this down and just keep clicking on things
Is there another button somewhere?
Nice! This is getting intriguing now!
I just have to find the next button.
There it is!
Here we go!
Where's that pointing at?
Where you pointing to bro?
Ima just keep clicking on everything!
Keep clicking on everything til something uncovers itself! *hiss*
There we go!
Uhh down, there we go!
Noo! I didn't want to press that!
There we go!
Ooo! This is super intriguing! Haha!
What's happening?
Ok..th-
YESSS!!
What is this?
Ooh..
Curiouser and curiouser
Oh God you're a puzzle...
Awe no! I'm terrible at these!
I'm terrible at most things!
Can I reset it?
This is like fuckin' Riddle School all over again! Awe damnit!
Ther-ok-there must be a pattern to be able to do this,
there has to be, of course there is.
How else the fuck would ya pass it?
Uhmmm
I don't even know how to get it back to normal now! There we go! Blehh-bleh [Chuckle]
Is there any secrets around this?
This might take me a while! But I-I wanna see what-what it's all about!
Dude, what is your panel?!
Why is this here?!
Steve?!
Where'd he go?
Did you guys see-I don't know
Uhmmm
Oh!
Awe! So close!
Awe man!
Uhh..there..there..ohh fuck
I don't know how to do this!
I don't know the sequencing to everything!
I don't know how- I don't know-
what
ok, that? No..
YES! I DID IT! Ohh by sheer fucking accident!
What's happening?
I caused an earthquake!
Where'd he go? I got a badge for that..split earth..
Now what do I do? Awe I thought I was like
figuring out some fuckin magic mumbo
jumbo there for a second,
'cause I got so many different things!
Awe shit!
This says correct though...
Should I- should I do this again?
The other button was over here somewhere...there it was
Ok..maybe if I do these again, maybe I can-
Can I click the buttons again?
And do this?
Uhm
I wonder when I...
Ohhhh!!
There's something! 1, 2, 3, so that correlates to this. 1 equals 2
Ok..so do I have to get this?
1 equals 2...2 equals 21 equa-I don't fuckin' know
Oohh
And this is also work
So you get the third one and the last one
This is awesome! It's so cryptic!
Okay, no...can I clear that?
1 1
Okay, so do I have to get this?
3, 1, 2, 2, 1, 1
3
1
2 2
1 1
C'mon! That's somethin'!
1 1 1
2 2
1
You're fuckin' showin' me these things and I don't know what they are
So is that 1
Is that like this, this or is it- ugh...I don't KNOW!
1 equals 2
But, like, is this-this is wh- III...I don't know if it's 1 and then 2 or 2 and then 1
So let's...I...
What the fuck? And this math equation
I have no hope of figuring out!
Awe shite...
Ooh, difficult!
I don't know!
This might be a game where I have to look up something, but i'm gonna try my best not to
Wha-Ok my problem is, is that I don't know what 3 is?
Maybe 3 is just 3.
'Cause it seems like these...
Tie in with some of this...
But then some of these are just straight numbers...
but then some of these are just straight
numbers,
so it's like II is equal to 1.
So when you do 1 it's like...this is 1
And then 2 might just be 2 on it's own
And then 3 might just be 3 on it's own so when I type in 3 it's actually just 3
When I type in this, it's actually the II. So maybe this is the solution
But is it upside down or not?
I. Don't. Know. Maybe I should just keep pressin' buttons
OHHH!! AHAHAHAHA
*clap*
Yeahhh!!! Oh my God! It's just like the last puzzle!
Pressin' buttons- pressin' buttons works!
Don't do it
What am I- what am I not doing?
Ohhh Jesu- what? What? What?
Okay, 1...What was the thing I entered? Awe it doesn't fit now...
It was 1, 3, 2, 2, 3, 1 I think that I pressed last time
Oh my God I can't believe I did that!
Uhmm
What ARE these?
Ok, 1, 3, 2, 2, 3, 1
Okay entering it again does nothing.
Okay, I can enter 4 numbers
4 numbers, uhh...3..1...
*slurp*
What the fuck are these though?
Like, why this? and then this? Wait...
Maybe if--maybe that's this
So bottom right
Bottom left
Bottom left, bottom right?
YEAAHHH! That WAS that!
So does that mean that this is this?
Do I actually have to solve that equation?
Whyy?
Okay..what- wait, what the fuck are these first?
They don't do anything! 2-7-6
4
2 7 6 4
No, I thought I was clever...wait maybe it's 4 2 7 6
It's probably giving me the code right now. I'm probably looking at the code
ooOOhhh
Brings it back to 0
I have to click this?!
Un- oh God- until it gets to 2 7 6
Oh Jesus
Oh my Go- I'm gonna be here all day!
Can I just hold it?
Or keep pressin' enter or something instead of the mouse?
Mother of God!
It was nice knowing you guys, it was nice havin' a index finger!
Well as long as it lasted..
Ya know we're not doing too badly...
We're at-we're at 130 already!
Halfway there!
It's just annoying! Ahahaha
This is game
Do not hit the red button.
Do not hit the red button!
The whole idea of the game seems to be not hitting the red buttons!
Here we go, we're getting there!
I probably should be editing this out, but... you know what?
If I have to suffer through it, so do you guys!
2 7 6
I shoulda just pressed the red button!
UGHHH!! I HAVE TO DO IT ALL AGAIN!!!
I don't even know what I di- fuck me!
What did I do?
I can't remember what I did
Shiiittt
2 7 6 baby!
There we go! The fastest in the wild west!
I got another ending!
Nice!
Green! So the ground overtook the land again.
Music's awesome!...Wait...
So that was- that was just pressin' a bunch of buttons, what happens if I just keep pressin' the red button?
Hahaaaa!!
Dude this game is awesome!!
What if I keep pressing the red button?
There's my hammer!
What do I hammer though?
WHAT DID I DO?! I'M SORRY!!!
What the fuck?!
I don't know if you guys saw that, I don't know if that actually showed up.
The whole screen filled
And a-a pyramid came up with an eye in the middle. Very illuminati-esque
I don't know if that's actually gonna show..
That was creepy!
Holy shit!
I got an achievement we are watching
I got an achievement! We are watching...
That was pretty damn cool! True?
Okay we have 3 endings!
Oh 4 endings! I got the earthqake one as well
Okay so I have to press it like 8 times I think
What does this symbol mean?
Oh God, I don't know
Are you the same as this? or are there other colors somewhere? Wait...
Not the same, okay.
green, red, blue, yellow
I'm not seeing any sort of hints for that anywhere
I'm just gonna keep pressing the red button
There we go! Dummy!
I got another ending! Okay so that's-that's the amount of endings I can get for that
Nice! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5...5 endings! Not doing too badly! Awesome!
Uhmm
'Cause the game is called Please Don't Touch Anything, so logic- the-the whole game is about touching everything
So logic would dictate: Just keep pressin' the button!
So that's how I got that 1, 3, 2, 2, 3, 1
Okay cool and then right, left, left, right?
That opens that
I don't know what the D4 is though!
Uhm I have to figure this out so...
This was this, this was this, so this is probably this
or this
no it probably wouldn't b- 1, 2
3, 1 2 3 4 5
3, 5, 2, 3?
no
Uhh
2, 1, 3, 1?
I thought it was like two empty, one, three empty, one kinda thing, but it doesn't seem to be so...
8, 3, 6, 7?
Or 8, 2- 8, 2, 3, 2!
Ahh that did something! Haha!
So the code is there! 8, 2, 3, 2
So what are you?
8 of the 12th, 1984
Are we gonna time travel?!
Awesome!
We time traveled! The moon is in bits and the earth is destroyed
So what am I in?
What is this booth?
This booth seems to be like some sort of time travel device
Okay
Oh, fuck
Uhh 1- 1, 3, 2, 2, 3, 1...yes
What happens if I pull you right?
I get another one!
This is so cool! Maaaaaax
[Chuckle]
Wait, there's arrows pointing at shit. Infinity goes up
I don't fuckin' know
What the hell man?!
Does that say somethin'?
'0 stap'
I don't fuckin' know
Morse!
the music suppose three more something
Is the music supposed to be...morse or something?
Oh, that's the nuke button!
Awesome!
Kill the bulls! It's like a cave painting.
Oh Jesus
Oh m- c'mon man! There's a lady's face.
And like a castle in the background? and a sunset?
Oohhhpp
There's something over here! 5, 5, 5, 2, 3, 6, 8
so how do we get 5 by 5 to 3 68 I can't
do that anywhere
S-so...
How do I get-
5, 5, 5, 2, 3, 6, 8. I can't do that anywhere!
I should write that down somewhere!
I need a notepad!...Stat!
This is my little notepad where I write all my things...like all the list of games
and shit
Uhmmm
Soo
5, 5, 5, 2, 3, 6, 8.
I don't know if that actually has any
purpose right now but I'm going to keep it anyway.
That was right here, it's just like a ghost on a bed
Can't click it.
Ooooo that looks like a big fingerprint thing! Oh no that's a galaxy
It's a galaxy and it's pointing to a planet here like "what planet is that?"
Is it earth?
This is really cool!
I really like this game!
It's- it is very Papers Please-esque where you think there's a lot more going on with like the Ezic order
Pac-Man!!! Ahaha
haha
I don't know what i'm doing
23, 1, 4, 2, 1
This is like morse
oh yeah that's what it said it said more
sundays Morse is down and up
Oh yeah! That's what it said. It said morse on this.
Morse is down and up, so...
I have to figure out what th- what morse i'm supposed to be typing in
Maybe that's this!
0, 0, 1, 0, 0, 0, 1
I fuckin' knew it!
Oh no! Robots!
[Laugh]
Kill all humans! *clap* Very fucking nice Futurama reference!
nice awesome
Nice!
Awesome! Okay
ok does that mean a 367 is another code
let me try that
So does that mean 8, 3, 6, 7 is another code? Let me try that
1, 3, 2, 2, 3, 1
Then pull you left...so...8, 3, 6, 7
I didn't even need the fuckin thing!
Don't need to solve that
ohhh....is this a game of minesweeper?
No?
1, 2, 3, 4, okay...can I have my little duder back?
I forget how I got that...Oh wait, 8, 2, 3, 2
Oh no that was for that...okay
Oh wait what happens if I go back?
I didn't do that ending!
Yay!!! Oh it's two halves of the same ending
That's fucking cool
Okay!
Okay i'm gonna leave this episode here!
I'm sorry! I know there's a lot more
endings to do but I'll probably do another
episode and try to get the rest of the endings
Oooo super cool game!
There's such an easy premise. Wait, I have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7...7 endings...
I have a shit ton of endings left
Oooo this is fun!
I imagine some of the other endings are gonna get harder though, 'cause I have
absolutely no idea
How the other things are gonna work!
Anyway!
Let me know what you guys think! This is rad!
I-i'm really digging this! I like the whole...
Sorta like, spooky element to it!
It's like it-it's a simple game on the surface but underneath it it's like "what the hell is goin on?!"
"Where am I? How am I able to do these things to this poor city?"
Am I looking at it on a monitor from somewhere
Yeah, I guess so, cause it's connected..
Or is that just like right outside the window?
Who knows? This is cool! Anyway!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING THIS EPISODE! IF YOU LIKED IT...
PUNCH THAT LIKE BUTTON IN THE FACE...LIKE A BOSS!!!! AND
OH!
"Great. Thanks man you've really helped me."
"What took you so long? Something could happen."
"Really?...Like what, the Apocalypse?"
"You've got to have an education to run this machine. Let's go."
Did I get another ending?
[Chuckle]
Awesome! Oh I got the first ending!
Sweet! Okay
LIKE A BOSS!!! High fives all around *High five* *High five*
But THANK YOU GUYS!!! AND I WILL SEE ALL YOU DUDES...
IN THE NEXT VIDEO!!!!!
I kinda play God in this little machine
Playing God with this little city. Is this place even real?
Who am I?
What are do?
We will never know.
