You know this one time I was stuck in traffic,
the traffic was so bad…
okay, and I was driving.
And I, ended up on the left side of the road
at this signal, right?
And you know...
Everybody knows this!
If you want to take a right at the signal,
you stay on the right side of the road.
You want to take a left,
you stay on the left.
And this happens to us sometimes,
you end up on the left side of the road by
mistake…
you think you’re going to overtake,
and you end up being an asshole
and you end up on the left side of the road.
I ended up on the left side of the road
and I was blocking this guy behind me,
who wanted to take a left.
And the guy behind me, is just going crazy!
He’s going like…
PEPPEEENN!!
PEPPEEENN!!
MOVE!!!
MOVE!!!
MOVE!!!
MOVE!!!
And I’m like “I’m sorry I’m just..
I wanted to take a right..”
I don’t give a shit, just move!!
MOVE!!!
MOVE!!!
MOVE!!!
I’m sorry but there’s a policeman…
I’m in a hurry, just move!!!
MOVE!!
But there’s oncoming traffic.
I don’t care, just move!!
MOVE!!!
And I’m like,
By the time I move
and then this guy comes in front,
he’s stuck there…the red signal falls…
he’s really like cursing….
he can’t take that left…
I’m like, “Man!!
These Ambulances can be a pain in the ass
sometimes, you know?”
Ah damn it!
Yeah, we’re all late to work man!!
By the way,
does anybody here know…
what number
to call
for the ambulance?
Does anybody know?
One zero….
Alright calm down Mr. General Knowledge!!
Alright?
I heard a couple of one zero threes…
One zero…
I don’t friggin know.
We need a 911 up in here man!
I’m telling you,
If I crack my head on the sink in the bathroom…
I’ll be like “Someone call 911”
That’s only in America!
Okay, find the international code, just call
them!!
Head is bleeding!
I don’t know man…I…
I know it’s somewhere around the hundreds
alright.
If I had my head bleeding, in the friggin
bathroom,
I’d be like, one zero zero…
Hello ambulance?
This is police department.
Oh sorry.
Okay, one zero one…
Hello ambulance?
This is fire engine department.
Oh sorry okay.
One zero two…
Hello ambulance?
This is Vodafone customer care.
Can you please call ambulance for me?
Much blood is coming!
Please!!
You know what, we need a 911.
Alright?
We need a 911…
but not only do we need a 911…
we also need one language that you can use
when you call these emergency services.
Irrespective of which part of the country
you’re from
you’ve got to learn that local language,
before you crack your head!
That’s a lot of time, you know?
I didn’t learn any Hindi growing up.
I took it up as my second language,
but they didn’t teach us any of the useful
stuff.
All the Hindi I picked up, is going to the
Chat store…
and watching some shitty movie,
you’re forced to watch on the bus.
That’s all the Hindi I know.
I can maybe order like an Ola Cab or something,
to my house that’s it.
That’s all I know.
Here’s a story that really happened to me.
I was on my way to the airport, okay?
And…I….
Saw this bush that was burning.
Okay?
On the other side of the road.
This bush, was burning.
I know it sounds like a Bible story,
but it’s a true story!
This bush was burning…
And then I decided to call…
The Fire Department,
and I figured out the number.
I called them number, and I was like….
And then I realise,
maybe I’m blowing this out of proportion,
you know?
Maybe…
It’s not a big deal.
It’s just a bush that had caught fire,
And I’m trying to communicate this.
