Uh, h-hi Tiffany. You seem to...
You look like you need help.
Uh, who the hell are you?
Uh, Roger? Roger Collins.
We're uh, in Humanities together.
Uh, okay.
Can you fix my car?
I'll see what I can do.
Oh, this is easy stuff.
There you go!
Oh wow, thanks!
How can I ever repay you?
Maybe we can just have lunch together, sometime.
I'm sorry...I can't.
Thing is, you're just not my type.
And what is your type, exactly?
I only date the sweetest,
most adorable guys in the world.
Don't worry, not many guys can compete with that.
(sigh)
Yeah...
Well, I gotta go shopping now.
Uh huh.
(Roger)
I mean, what was I supposed to do?
It's like I was nothing to her.
Whatever gave you the idea you weren't?
I thought this was my chance.
Fix her car and have her notice me and like me and go out with me.
Girls like Tiffany never notice people like you.
Besides, they go through boyfriends like I go through toilet paper.
Not a good sign.
Well, I don't need her.
Nope, not at all.
Five bucks he's not over her yet.
Geez, everything I see reminds me of her...
the clouds...
that sign...
that dog...
(sigh)
Aha! Hello there!
Oh, great. Who the hell are you?
Globbo's the name, and relationship help's the game.
I sensed your heartache and thought I could lend you a hand.
What, are you going to get Tiffany to like me?
Not exactly.
I will BECOME Tiffany.
But you're not really her.
But I'll look like her, and that will be enough to fill your empty heart.
Can you at least change your voice to sound like her?
No.
Oh well, close enough.
Let's go behind that tree and make out.
And of course, there's the chimpanzee.
What are some of the similarities between humans and chimpanzees?
(kissing)
Can anyone give me the DIFFERENCES between humans and chimpanzees?
(kissing)
Let's move on to...uh, Mr. Collins?
Er, yes Dr. Phillips?
Making out in class is a violation of the student code of conduct!
Oops.
Sorry.
I'm afraid I don't recognize you, miss.
Oh, I'm not in this class.
I'm Roger's girlfriend.
If you're not in this class, would you please wait outside until it's over?
Now then, as I was saying.
Chimpanzees are actually more similar to bees.
Tiffany! What are you doing here?
I'm waiting for my boyfriend, Roger.
Your ex, Brent.
He's been texting you all day.
And he really wants to talk to you.
But I'm--
Oh!
There he is.
See you at volleyball practice.
Hey, Tiff, we really need to talk.
I want you to take me back, baby.
Go away.
Roger's my boyfriend.
Please, Tiff. I've changed.
What can I do to show my love for you?
GO
AWAY
(scream)
Oh my God, she melted him!
You're next if you tell anyone!
Y-yes, ma'am!
(Roger)
Guys! I have a huge surprise to show you!
I'd like you all to meet my GIRLFRIEND, Tiffany.
What?!
No way!
Hi guys.
I've heard so much about you.
Why is she purple?
All right, I admit.
It's not REALLY her.
My name is Globbo.
I help lonely, broken hearts once a year.
He's so...squishy.
Yeah, feels like jelly in our make out sessions.
Tastes like jelly, too.
Roger, are you sure this is what you want?
What do you mean?
This isn't really Tiffany.
It just looks like her.
If you really liked her, you'd like her personality.
I thought you'd like my new girlfriend, but I can tell you're just jealous!
Come on, Tiff...Glab...Tif—whatever your name is.
Let's make out behind our favorite tree.
Again.
Coming, dear.
This isn't healthy.
As long as he's happy, who are we to judge?
Because it's wrong.
We need to find a way to destroy this Globbo thing.
And how do you propose we do that?
Science.
Did someone say, "science"?
(kissing)
What is it, dear?
Maybe Liz is right.
About what?
I think you should go.
But Roger, I'm everything you wanted.
I'm Tiffany.
No you're not. You just look like her.
Isn't that enough?
Looks without personality are just looks.
I realize that now.
I can be whatever you want.
Maybe that's the problem.
(sigh)
I think we should break up.
You can't!
Our make out tree!
I will destroy everything you hold dear!
W-what...what is th--
What the--
We mixed four types of detergents with hydrogen peroxide, ammonia, and vinegar.
And that weird blue crap the Professor had in his desk.
I'm sorry it had to end like this, Roger.
No.
No, it's fine.
I guess I never realized until now that I didn't really LIKE Tiffany.
I just liked her looks.
And liking someone just for their looks is a recipe for disaster.
Thanks, Professor.
Now I'll be sure to remember that.
I'll remember that forever.
