 
Don't You Remember

By Cheyenne Barnett

Copyright 2015 Cheyenne Barnett

Smashwords Edition

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work of this author.

Book Cover Made By Cheyenne Barnett

Stock Photos By: Susanne Winter and Mark Bray under the Attribution 2.0 Generic license.

Changes were made.

### Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Epilogue

Acknowledgements

About the Author

### Chapter One

"Carrie, you and Dimitri make the perfect couple! I'm sure he'll be popping the question any day now!" Those words had echoed through my mind for years now. Everyone was so sure. I was so sure. But apparently, he had deceived us all, even me...

Every little girl dreams of finding her Prince Charming and in ninth grade, I was almost certain I had found mine. He was so perfect. Every girl longed for him. He was the new kid and had just moved to town with his family. I don't think he realized how much attention he would get, but when you move to a small town in rural Kentucky, everyone notices you.

He had jet black hair and dark brown eyes. He was tall and even for a measly fifteen-year-old, he had quite the body. But the one thing most girls went crazy over was the fact that he was Russian. His family had to move here due to his father's work but thankfully, his entire family spoke fluent English.

He made quite an impression on the entire school, but he never once gave any girl the time of day, except me. We met at lunch the second day of school. I was waiting in line to get my food and when I turned around, he bumped into me. He helped me pick up my tray and even offered to let me take his, but I refused. I was still in shock that he was talking to me. I wasn't the only one, though, it felt like the whole lunch room was watching us at that very moment.

I was always the shy girl, I didn't like attention, sure I had friends, but just a select few. I excused myself and practically ran to my lunch table. As soon as I sat down, everyone wanted to know what he said. I brushed them off and changed the subject. It would have worked too, but he came over and asked if he could join us. Of course, they said yes, and he sat next to me.

The next day, he figured out that I was in his science class and proceeded to sit with me each and every day. I might not have been very popular the first day of school, but by the third, everyone wanted to be my friend. Of course, I knew it was because of him and I didn't buy any of their attitudes.

As bad as I hated to admit it, I began falling for him. He was a true gentleman and treated me with respect. By Christmas, we were much closer and everyone could tell. Over our break, he asked me out on our first date and I accepted.

That was the start of many more dates to come and by our Senior year, we were voted Prom King and Queen. You're probably thinking that only preps get to have such a title, but not this time. Everyone thought we were perfect together, even the girls that were jealous, still couldn't reject that thought.

After graduation, we packed up and headed off to college. I majored in Nursing and he worked toward his Ph.D. in Medicine. Everything was going so well... We moved in with each other after our first year, no one was surprised, and I thought it wouldn't be much longer until he popped the question. I mean, we'd been together for almost six years, if he didn't want to marry me, wouldn't we have broken up a long time ago?

Our second year of college was when my friends started mentioning a wedding and one of my best friends actually started compiling a folder for ideas. It was crazy but I couldn't deny it, I wanted to marry him. I knew he was the one, or at least, I thought he was.

Once summer break came along, he started acting a little distant. I didn't think much of it, I'm sure he was stressed from all the work he had to do but one morning everything changed. I woke up and he was packing his things. When I asked him what he was doing, he kept saying he was sorry and he should have told me sooner. I had no idea what he was talking about and when he told me that he had dropped out and was leaving for the army that same day, I thought I was dreaming.

After I realized that I was awake and this was really happening, I started asking a ton of questions. I didn't understand why he was doing this and he never really answered me. He kissed me goodbye and said, "Please don't blame yourself. This is about me, I have to do this for me." And with that, he was gone.

We had planned to go to Miami that summer with our friends. It was supposed to be the ultimate summer break, but I didn't go. My summer consisted of psychiatrists and antidepressants. My friends were worried but I just pushed them away. I couldn't be around them, they reminded me of the life I was supposed to have, not the one I had now.

I became a loner again and somehow, made it through college. I graduated with honors and had a bachelor's degree in Nursing. I became exactly what I wanted and yet, I still wasn't happy. Something was missing and I knew it was him, but I forced myself to get a job and to move away from the house that we had once shared.

Now, five years after my graduation, I'm living in a one bedroom apartment right beside the hospital. I haven't talked to anyone I went to school with since he left. I don't have a boyfriend, I haven't dated anyone in three years. I tried, but it didn't work. I compared everyone to him and I knew no one could ever take his place. I was mad at him, but at the same time, I wished he would come back for me.

I didn't even know if he was alive. I had reached out to his family, but they refused to have any contact with me. Eventually, I gave up. I threw myself into my work and became the ultimate workaholic. I hadn't taken a vacation day since I took the job and my boss became worried about me. I was still seeing a psychiatrist every three months and I was still on antidepressants.

All because of him.

About a week ago, my boss insisted I go on vacation. He said I needed a break, so I arranged to go to Hawaii for a week, which is why I'm now boarding a plane. Did I want to go? Not really and he knew I didn't, which is why he threatened my job. So, I'll pretend to enjoy some time off and maybe he'll leave me alone for another couple of years.

I found my seat and buckled myself in. I grasped my carry on tightly and awaited take off. I was daydreaming when I heard that voice, "Looks like we're right here..."

My eyes shot open as I looked up and down the aisle. There he stood. Dimitri Kozlovski, holding the hands of a blonde... I sank down in my seat, telling myself I had to be dreaming, there was no way he was on the same flight as me.

The blonde passed and sat down in front of me as I prayed to God he wouldn't see me. "Carrie?" He asked. I looked up and met those dark brown eyes. I almost got lost in them until I remembered how much pain he had caused me.

"Dimitri. Funny seeing you here." I forced a smile. My worst and best day had just come true. I had hoped that I would run into him again, but at the same time, I despised him.

He had ruined me.

Before he could say anything, the Captain came over the intercom and told everyone to take their seats, we were about to take off. He reluctantly sat down and talked to the blonde beside him. Various thoughts ran through my head, should I get off and tell my boss I was sick? Maybe I could leave on another flight? And who was this blonde?

Probably his wife.

All these questions were taunting me and once the plane took off, I knew there was no turning back. I was stuck on here, with him, for at least nine hours. Why did this have to happen to me? Why right now?

Once we reached the safe flying zone, everyone was allowed to move about the cabin. I pretended to fall asleep, I really didn't want to engage in any social contact with him right now. I just wanted to land at the Honolulu airport and get on my merry little way.

I heard him turn around, probably to look at me, but he never said a word. I did overhear the blonde speak up, "So, who is she?"

"An old friend I used to go to school with." He mutters.

An old friend, huh?

"Whatever you say, dear. I'm just going to go to the restroom. I'll be right back." I could hear her walk away and as soon as she was gone, he moved again.

"I know you're not asleep, Carrie. You never could sleep sitting up." My eyes flew open as I glared at him.

"You don't know me," I add, watching his facial expressions carefully.

He sighs, "Look, you have every right to be angry with me, but can you at least tell me about your family?"

"Family?" I ask.

"Yeah, husband? Kids?"

He knew better than to ask me that. "No. I'm alone."

Apparently, that made him realize something and he turned back around. Maybe he finally understood how much damage he had really done. All of this was because of him... When the blonde came back, they talked amongst themselves and he never looked back at me again...

After hours of flying, we were almost to Hawaii. It wouldn't be long now and I honestly couldn't wait to get as far away from him as humanly possible. Everything was going well until the plane started shaking.

The Captain kept assuring us that it was just turbulence, but once it started getting worse, the emergency light started flashing. Everyone started reaching for the air masks above them, then we heard a horrible noise. It sounded like a train was right beside us. When I turned around, I realized third class was gone.

Our plane was ripping in half.

The last thing I remember is everyone screaming and reaching out for their loved ones. Me? I didn't have anyone. The last thing I saw was Dimitri reaching for the blonde and holding onto the seat in front of him.

We were going down and fast.

### Chapter Two

"Come on! Wake up!" It was him. I heard him, but he sounded distant. I struggled, but eventually got my eyes to open. What I saw startled me, I was only a few feet away from part of the plane. It was the second class cabin. I moved away from it and took in my surroundings...

I was on a beach, the few passengers that were aboard the plane, laid scattered around me. It was indeed a gruesome site but some of them were moving. They were sitting up, looking around, just as I was.

We really did crash, but where? Were we in Hawaii? If we were, wouldn't help be here by now? Then again, I had no idea how long we had been here... I finally saw Dimitri. He was on the other side of the plane doing CPR on the blonde. She looked horrible, blood soaking her clothes.

Suddenly, my nurse instincts kicked in and I rose to my feet. I examined myself, no apparent broken bones or anything major, just a few cuts and bruises. "Please wake up!" He cried. I had no choice. I didn't know if anyone else had medical training, I had to help. I ran toward him and knelt beside her. "Switch with me, you're probably tired." He didn't argue, he removed his hands as I began compressions.

I tried to save her, I really did, but she was gone and he knew that. "Just stop." He finally muttered. I sat down in the sand and ran my fingers over her eyes. "She was probably already gone before you got to her."

"I know. I've just never lost a patient before." He stares out into the open.

"Patient?" I ask curiously.

He nods. "I went back to school. I was finishing up my internship this fall." He was almost a Doctor. I looked back at the blonde and he noticed, "Her name was Rebecca. We were going to Hawaii on vacation. I was going to propose."

At that moment, I didn't know what to say. I was still angry with him, he left me, but he probably really did love her. I kind of felt remorse. "I don't expect you to say anything, Carrie. Not after what I did."

I stood and walked away. All this was too much and I still didn't know what was going on. I just couldn't wrap my head around it, but right now, there were passengers on this island that needed my help. I went around and checked the ones that weren't responsive. I tried CPR on each and every one of them, but it didn't work. They had been dead for a while now and there was no way I could bring them back. I started dragging them away from the shore and into a row near the tree line.

Once I finished with them, I checked the others for injury. There was one in particular that was bleeding pretty rapidly from the head. A short, thin brunette knelt beside me, "I'm his wife, is there anything you can do?"

I nod, "I might be able to stop the bleeding." I tore off a part of my shirt and had her apply pressure to his head. "Hold it in place and press down. I'll be right back." I stood up and walked over to what was left of the plane. Dimitri was still sitting on the other side, staring out at the ocean. I walked up to the cabin to see what I could find. Luggage was strolled everywhere. I started going through bags in search of medical supplies.

Luckily, I found some pain medication, some EpiPen's, and a few bottles of antibiotics. I also found my carry on, thank God, that housed my antidepressants. I stuck them in my pocket and walked toward the back of second class. This was where the plane was cut off, but the stewardess' desk was still attached. I rummaged through it and found a first aid kit.

After that, I carefully exited the cabin and went back over to the injured passenger. "What's your name?" I asked the woman.

"Sarah, this is Ryan." She nodded toward her husband. He was awake now, and very aware of his surroundings. "Ryan, my name's Carrie. I'm a nurse and I'm going to have to bandage your head, alright?" He nodded as I went to work. I disinfected and wrapped the wound. "Now, take it easy, you've lost a lot of blood." I turn back to Sarah, "Don't let him get up by himself."

Once I finished with them, I sat down near the trees and watched the sun go down. People were talking amongst one another, some in a complete panic, but I knew better than to get involved. Panic was natural, especially in this situation, and it was a fear in which they had to overcome themselves.

Hopefully, we would be found soon and when we were, I was totally going to chew my boss out for making me get on this stupid plane. I had a bad feeling and what do you know? I was right. I took my pill bottle out of my pocket and stuck a tablet in my mouth. As I did this, I noticed Dimitri was watching me. Great, more questions.

I ignored him and continued watching the sunset. Eventually, it became dark and everyone fell asleep. I was grateful for the peace and quiet. I had time to think but it wasn't all that I had hoped for. I tried to figure out where we were, but I didn't go to college for geography, I went for nursing, so I was just as clueless as everyone else. I kept praying that we were somewhere in Hawaii and maybe this part of the island was just inhabited. Maybe if we walked a while, we'd come across a city or something.

I knew the chances of that happening were very slim, but I kept telling myself that I wouldn't panic. I rested my back against a tree and hoped that sleep would take over. I was almost out when I heard someone sit down beside me. "I should have helped, I'm sorry I didn't," Dimitri says with a tiny bit of emotion in his voice. He wasn't one to show his feelings, but when he did, my heart went out to him.

"You were grieving. It's fine. I took care of it."

"I saw. You're a good nurse, Carrie. You were calm and they trusted you."

"That's my job."

It stayed quiet for a few minutes, it was a bit awkward and he noticed, "Now's as good a time as any to talk, I guess."

I glanced at him, "There's nothing to talk about."

"Yes, there is. We might as well get it over with, otherwise, you'll just pretend everything's alright and go on ignoring me like you have since we met on the plane. I'm sorry I left, okay? I didn't want to, I had to. I didn't have a choice. I know I should have come back for you, but I thought you would've moved on, that's what you were supposed to do..."

This lit a fire under me, but I tried to stay calm. I didn't want to wake the others, "That was seven years ago. The past is the past." I lied.

He watched me carefully, "I knew you better than anyone back then and I still do. You're lying to me. It's written all over your face. When we saw each other earlier, it pained me to look at you. You don't look well, Care. Are you sick?" Care... Lord only knows how long it had been since I heard that nickname. Oh, how I had longed to hear him call me that again and now, I didn't know what to make of my emotions.

"I'm fine."

"Okay, then what did you take earlier? Show me."

Crap. I guess, he'd find out sooner or later. I dug into my pocket and threw the bottle at him. He caught it with ease and read the name. "Prozac? You're on antidepressants?" He looked at me in a way I had never seen before...

He was concerned.

"It's nothing, okay?"

"How long have you been on these?" He asked, quickly.

I took a deep breath. There was no reason to lie. Maybe he would understand how much damage he'd done. "Seven years."

"You weren't taking these while we were together?"

"No." Come on, Carrie. Just say it, I told myself. "The summer that you left, we were supposed to go to Miami with everyone, remember?" He nods. "They went and I stayed behind. That entire summer, I saw a psychiatrist four times a week. He put me on them a week after you left and I've been on them ever since."

That's when I saw it. He looked away from me and it was almost as if a light bulb went off in his head, "I caused this. I did this to you." He muttered. I think he was waiting for me to say something, but I didn't. I didn't have anything to say. I thought telling him this would make me feel better, but it didn't. If anything, it made me feel like I had pushed all my problems on him. Granted, I wanted him to feel guilty for leaving me, but not this way.

"What happened after that? What'd you do? What about all our friends?"

I had already started this conversation, I might as well finish it. "I never talked to them after that. They ignored me when they saw me around campus. When I lost you, I lost them too. But with the help of the medicine and my psychiatrist, I graduated and moved out of the house. I moved into an apartment beside of the hospital I work at."

"How long did you see this psychiatrist?" He mutters.

"I still go to her every three months." Once I said that out loud, I realized how desperate I sounded. Why did he hurt me so badly? Why couldn't I just move on like everyone else? "So, I've told you my sob story, why don't you tell me yours? After all, you never told me why you left."

He sighs, "My dad lost his job. When my mom contacted me, they had gone through all their savings and they were three months behind on the house payment. They needed help now or they'd be sent back to Russia. I couldn't let them do that, so I joined the army and every dime I made went straight to them. I helped them until they were back on their feet, then once I served my time, I came back and joined med school again. I really wanted to come find you, I swear I did, but I figured you had moved on and I didn't want to ruin that."

"Why didn't you just tell me in the first place instead of springing it on me all of a sudden? I would've dropped out. I could have helped your parents too."

"I knew you'd say that, but I didn't want you to put your life on hold just because I had to. They were my parents, not yours."

I shook my head, "Then apparently you never knew me at all. I would've gone anywhere with you because you were my life. I didn't care about college, I could have waited just like you, but you never gave me that option." I looked up into the sky and noticed the moon was overhead. "We'd better get some sleep. I'm sure tomorrow will be a pleasant day." I walked away from him and went down the beach a little further before I found a good place to sleep.

I was restless that night. Everything he had said to me, just made me feel worse. If he would have just told me, all of this could have been avoided. I was tired, yet I couldn't sleep. I took another antidepressant and eventually dozed off.

#~#~#~#~#~#

When I awoke from my peaceful slumber, I was a bit freighted that all of this wasn't just a dream. I really was stranded on an island with Dimitri. Thee Dimitri. The more I thought about it, the more queasy I became. Out of all the people in the world, I had to be on that flight and he had to be with me.

I was pretty certain that search parties were looking for us by now, but there was always that 'What if' question in the back of my mind... What if they didn't find us right away? What if they never do? The more and more I pondered on that thought, the more I felt like I should push it away. I needed to think positive, if not for me, for the rest of the passengers. They were humans too, they had hopes and dreams like everyone else.

I stood and looked around the beach. Everyone else was still sleeping, so I went back into the cabin of the plane and tried to find food. I didn't find much, just a few packs of water and some left over fruit. I dragged them outside and into the center of the beach. When people started waking up, they flocked around in a circle, awaiting their meal. After I ate, I went over to Ryan to check on his wound.

Thankfully, it had stopped bleeding and looked pretty good considering how gruesome it had looked the day before. I dressed it once again before I was interrupted by Dimitri. "Maybe I should take a look."

I stood and dusted myself off, "It's fine. I took care of it." I walked past him and returned to my empty spot along the tree line. I thought he would take that as a hint to leave me alone, but did he? No.

"So is this the way it's going to be? You're just going to keep blowing me off?"

I shrug, "Why not? That's what you've done to me for the past seven years... Haven't you heard about Karma?"

His eyes go cold, "Really, Care?"

"Don't call me that," I add quickly.

He chuckles uneasily, "Fine, _Carrie_ , you're acting like a child. We are in no position to act this way. This isn't some game! We're stranded on an island, for God's sake! I swear it's like you don't even care."

"I don't, not really." I lie. "I guess all those antidepressants have caused that."

That was a low blow, you could tell. "I told you my side of the story. I've said all I have to say." He starts to walk away, but I wasn't finished just yet.

"Yeah, you gave me the lamest excuse in the book, that's what you did. Just tell me, Dimitri, did you even care about me? I mean really, did you feel anything back then?"

He stopped and turned to face me, "Yes, I did, I still do. You were everything to me."

A part of me wanted to believe him, but at the same time, I still didn't understand... If he loved me so much, why did he leave me like that? "I'll never understand your choice but I hope it was worth it."

I thought that was it, I thought he'd walk away and just leave me be, but he just stood there. It's like he was in deep thought or something. Instead of waiting for him to walk away, I did. I realized what he said to me was kind of true... I was acting a little childish, especially considering the situation we were in, but I couldn't help it. I had waited for seven years to hear an answer from him. I needed it to be at peace with my anger, or at least, I thought I did.

Really, all his answer did was make me furious. I think I was more upset that my fairytale ending took a detour than anything. I was so in love with him, it was just indescribable. He was my everything and I kept telling myself that he would never leave me, we were meant to be. Everyone knew that... I would have never guessed that he would be the one to throw it all away.

Throughout the day, we salvaged anything we could from the cabin and Dimitri and the guys buried the dead bodies about a mile down the beach. Even if we did get rescued soon, none of us could stand not giving them a proper burial. Of course, digging the grave was a little tedious due to the fact that we didn't have a shovel, but they got creative and used just about anything they could find.

I kept myself busy by organizing any medical supplies into a backpack that I found on the plane. I didn't want to just sit around while everyone else was going through suitcases, I wanted to be productive as well. When I finished, it was almost sunset, it wouldn't be long until darkness took over. Immediately, I thought of my antidepressants, I knew I couldn't forget to take those.

I rummaged through my pockets and realized the pill bottle wasn't there. Panic settled over me as I looked around me. Maybe they just fell out? They have to be around here somewhere. Soon, I started retracing my steps and after that, true panic set in. I couldn't find them. "I was wondering when you'd figure it out," Dimitri said from behind me.

I turned on my heel and faced him, "What'd you do with them? Give 'em back."

"I took them while you were sleeping, I'm surprised it took you this long to figure out that they were missing." He said it as if he didn't have a care in the world.

"Why did you take them?"

He shrugs, "Well, first of all, you don't need them. If you're ever going to get over this, it has to be done by you, not some silly medication. That's what the psychiatrist did wrong. She should have talked you through your problems instead of making yourself hide them."

Anger rises within my chest, "Do you even remember what caused all of this? You! If you just stayed in college, where you were supposed to be, none of this would have ever happened! You wouldn't have left, I wouldn't be crazy, and we probably wouldn't be stuck on this island either!"

"See? Doesn't that feel better?"

I glare at him, "What are you now? A psychiatrist?"

"I did have to take a few psychology courses, but no. I was the one that caused this problem, I should be the one to help you end it. And we can start by getting you off those pills."

Oh, all of a sudden he wants to help me? "I don't need help, especially not from you. I've done just fine on my own, thank you. Now, give them back." I add sternly.

He sighs, "Carrie, they're not helping you... I'll make a deal with you. If you sit here with me for a bit and answer some of my questions, I'll give them back." I cock an eyebrow in suspicion. "Carrie, I promise, I will."

I didn't want to go along with it but I knew if there was any chance of getting my medication back before the night was over, this was it. "Fine."

"Good." He sits down in front of me as I roll my eyes. What have I gotten myself into? "So, first question. When was your last serious relationship?"

"Why do you care?" I sass.

"We agreed, you hold up your end of the deal and I'll hold up mine..."

"Fine, you were the last."

He meets my gaze for a second, but quickly looks away, "You've had to have someone?"

I nod, "Three years ago I had a short-lived relationship with one of the Doctor's working at the hospital." That wasn't a lie, I dated him for about two weeks before I called it quits.

"How short lived?"

"Two weeks..." I muttered.

He glances up at me, "Two weeks? You've got to be kidding. How on earth could you know somebody after two weeks?"

"I didn't say I knew him. I just didn't want to be with him."

"Okay, why? Be specific."

I was reluctant to say anything, I mean, he's my ex. Why should I tell him anything? Then I remembered... I wanted my antidepressants back. I had to get this over with. "He was more caught up in his future. He was looking for a wife."

"And that's a bad thing? Most people look for their spouse in their twenties and thirties, it's just human nature..."

"It may be, but I wasn't looking for a husband, so I ended it before it started."

"I know that's a lie, you've talked about getting married ever since I can remember. You wanted that fairytale ending just like every other girl."

I take a deep breath, "No, I wanted that fairytale ending with you and that was my problem. I met a lot of people once I began working, but I compared them all to you. No matter who I met, I expected them to do everything you did. Eventually, I figured out that was an impossible role to fill as everyone was their own person. After that, I gave up."

He didn't say anything at first and that was when I realized that I had actually caught him off guard. Before, he seemed to have had an answer to everything I said, but not this time... "When did you meet Rebecca?" I asked, turning the tables just a bit.

"I know what you're thinking and I swear, I didn't even know her when I left. I met her in med school. She was studying to become a Pediatrician, she was in one of my psychology classes and our professor paired us up for a group project."

It seemed reasonable. "So that's when you decided not to come look for me?"

He shakes his head, "No, I had already made that decision. I told myself you deserved a happy life without me right after I left the army. I didn't want to show up and find you married with a bunch of kids. I guess that's what I was afraid of." He trails off and looks back down the beach at the rest of the passengers. "I told them earlier that we needed to explore the island soon. We need to find a fresh water source and a few of them have agreed to accompany me. Would you like to come?" He changes the subject.

"I'd better not. At least one of us needs to stay here since, apparently, we're the only ones with medical training." He nods and stands up.

"I believe these are yours." He hands me a pill bottle. "Goodnight, Carrie."

And with that, he just walks away. As bad as I hated to admit it, I felt a little better after talking to him. I had been waiting to say that to him for ages and now that I finally had, it was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

Maybe ignoring him wasn't the right thing to do.

### Chapter Three

_Dimitri's Point of View_

What have I done? Why didn't I go find her? I was so afraid to see her happy without me, I never even thought about her being this way. I was almost positive that she would have been married by now. I mean, that's all she ever talked about, she wanted a husband and at least two kids, but she always refused to drive a minivan.

I should have checked on her, even if she was married, at least I would have known that she was happy. Now, I realized, all I had done was make a huge mess of her life. But she didn't understand, I had to help my parents. I couldn't let them go back to Russia, it wasn't fair to them or me. I couldn't lose the only family I had left just because my father lost his job, I was their son, it was my job to take care of them if they ever needed help.

Granted, I shouldn't have just woken up and left one morning. I had been aware of the day I was to leave for almost three weeks. Don't get me wrong, I tried to tell her, I really did, but I just couldn't. I loved her, with all my heart, and every time I looked at her, I could just see her heart breaking.

All because of me.

When the day finally came, I almost chickened out. I watched her while she slept for almost two hours before I started packing and the more I sat there, the more courage I lost. I knew what I had to do and I knew that she would be the one caught in the crossfire. So, I did what I thought was best.

Leave in a hurry and hopefully, get the pain and hurt over with.

She was so shocked, she couldn't even speak at first, it was like she was trying to wake herself up from a horrible dream... Once she realized that reality was right before her, she panicked. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to comfort her, but all of this was my fault. The only way she would ever heal from this was if I walked away.

The entire way to the airport, she was calling me, leaving voicemails, begging me to come back. Eventually, I just turned my phone off, I couldn't handle hearing her that upset and knowing there was nothing I could do.

Everything was out of my control now.

I kept my phone turned off for almost two weeks before I got up enough nerve to check all my messages. I had hundreds of missed calls and at least half as many voicemails. But they weren't just from her, some of them were from old friends, asking why I had done it. Telling me Carrie wasn't doing well, but I couldn't respond to any of them. I wanted to reply and ask how she was, I did, but I kept telling myself she was better off this way. One day, she would find someone else and be happy.

I prayed for that every single day.

When I got back home, I changed my number and went back to med school. That's when I met Rebecca. She kind of reminded me of Carrie. She was kind, gentle, and loved children. I guess, that's why I fell for her.

But none of that matters anymore. Rebecca's dead, Carrie hates me, and I'm stranded on a deserted island with people I don't know. By the second day, I was getting a little anxious about being rescued. I didn't want to upset anyone else, but I was beginning to wonder if anyone was even looking for us.

In a way, I wasn't as upset as I thought I was. Yes, I lost Rebecca, I'd come to know her very well and I really was planning to marry her, but was she Carrie? No. I still loved her just the same, but a part of me still felt like Carrie belonged with me. I knew that wasn't going to happen, she was still so upset with me and I wanted to help her.

I know what antidepressants can do to people, especially if they suddenly stop taking them. I was afraid that we wouldn't be rescued before she ran out. And if we weren't, I wasn't sure what would happen to her. The danger of stopping the medication would lead to withdrawals that could cause anxiety, fatigue, trouble sleeping, dizziness, and even flu-like symptoms. Considering she had been on them so long, those side effects would most likely be severe and seeing the position we were in, I couldn't treat her with other medications.

"Carrie, are you sure you want to stay here?" I ask, stopping by her side.

She nods, "Yes. How long will you be gone?"

"Probably overnight."

"Good luck then." She walks away as I lead the guys into the forest. I had no idea how large this island was and I prayed that we would be able to find our way back by morning. I left Carrie once and I didn't plan on making that mistake again.

Carrie's Point of View

I prayed they would find something.

Something to give everyone a little hope, but I knew the chances were thin. We didn't have a clue where we were and no one knew anything about this island. Who knows what was out there.

Truthfully, I did want to go. I didn't like sitting on the sidelines waiting, but I knew it was better that I stayed behind. Someone may need medical attention and I wanted to be away from Dimitri for a bit. I was so confused, I didn't know if I should work with him or pretend he didn't exist...

While the guys were gone, I got to know some of the ladies. They were sweet and surprisingly close to my age. Ryan also stayed behind due to his injury, and he joined in on the conversation as well. For a bit, we forgot about our situation and just socialized. It was a nice turn of events and got our minds off of everything.

We were having such a good time, I almost forgot about my medication. I remembered it before bed and soon after taking it, I fell asleep.

Talk about a rude awakening the next morning. The wind was blowing fiercely and soon, it began to pour the rain. The temperature dropped rapidly and the first thing I thought of was a hurricane. But it wasn't strong enough to be on top of us, it had to have hit off shore and we were just getting a storm.

Regardless of what it was, I had to move everyone inland. We used the trees for cover and they blocked some of the wind. I thought it would move on through fairly quickly, but it didn't. We were all pushed up against trees, trying to shield ourselves from the terrible weather. The entire time, all I could think about was the boys.

I hoped they were alright...

### Chapter Four

It rained. And rained. And rained.

As soon as we thought it was about to let up, it would turn into a downpour. We were all soaked and, thanks to the wind, freezing. But there was nothing we could do, we were better off under the trees than out in the open. We had nowhere else to go...

It went on like that for what seemed like hours. Soon, thunder and lightning came into play and I was beginning to wonder if a hurricane was really out of the question. "Look!" Sarah yelled as we all turned toward her. She was pointing deeper into the woods, that's when we saw it. Dark figures were moving toward us.

I squinted to better my vision...

Dimitri?

He led the way for the rest of the guys as they joined us underneath the trees. He came over to the tree I was under and huddled in closer, so I could hear him. "We found a stream about a mile out and it isn't salt water! There's a cave a little ways from it, we need to move there!"

"What if a rescue team shows up? They won't be able to find us!"

"Doesn't matter, nothing could fly in this weather, they would have turned around by now. We need to go!" I knew he was right, so we ran back to the beach with the others and grabbed anything we could carry. We saved nearly everything we had found, then we took off running back through the woods.

By the time we reached the stream, I felt like I was breathing through a straw. I didn't think I was that out of shape, but I knew the cold and rain didn't help matters either. We followed the stream another ten minutes and finally spotted the cave, wedged in between the trees. One by one, we walked inside. The guys had a few flashlights, which we had found in the plane. Once they turned them on, we were all quite astonished at how large the cave really was.

When they had told us about finding it, we were expecting something that was just big enough for us to fit in, but boy were we wrong. There were seventeen of us, including Dimitri and I, that had survived the plane crash. In the cave, we could all have our own personal space without bothering anyone else. And, it shielded us from the weather.

It was still cold, but not nearly as bad as it was out there. It was tolerable and since it wasn't completely dark outside, little rays of light were streaming into the cave, allowing us to see our surroundings. Near the back of the cave, was a slight curve, allowing for a little privacy. So, we all rummaged through the luggage and found dry clothes. Then, we took turns changing in the back.

I was the last one to change and decided to stay where I was. I slid down to the floor and propped my back up against the wall. It was a bit darker back here, but I didn't mind, I could still see a few feet on either side of me and that was all that mattered.

I just wanted time to myself. I had never really liked being around a group of people, I'd rather be on my own. I guess, in a way, I had gotten used to it. I had gotten over the fact that my life went in the total opposite direction I thought it was going. Now, my life consisted of work. I didn't even go out on Friday nights like most single ladies. Instead, Friday was my weekly Netflix Movie Marathon. Pathetic, huh?

"Carrie? You still back here?" Dimitri called.

"Yes."

He paused, "May I join you?"

"I suppose." Within a moment, he was sitting next to me.

"Don't want to join in on the discussion?" He asks, smiling.

"What discussion?" I was so lost in my own train of thought, I hadn't been listening to anyone else. I didn't even hear them.

"Everyone thinks it's best if we move camp here. The stream is close by and we have the cave now." I was afraid he'd say that. I knew it was for survival but I also knew no one would ever find us this deep in the forest.

"They can stay here if they'd like. But as soon as this storm lets up, I'm going back to the beach. That way, when someone comes, I can lead them to you."

He sighs loudly, "I can't change your mind?"

I shake my head, "They're just giving up and so are you! We've only been here four days. I'm sure it takes a little while to get search parties started and it's probably no easy task rounding up helicopters and all."

"I'm not giving up, they can still see the plane wreckage. They'll know we're here."

"Yeah and they'll probably assume we're all dead too."

He knew I was right, if anyone found all that debris, it would look too horrid to think anyone had survived. "Fine, then we'll both go back." He finally responded.

"No, you're the Doctor, you should stay here. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. I've done it for a long time." I didn't realize how bad it sounded until after I said it.

"Look, I know you're mad, I don't blame you, but I'm trying to make amends here."

Amends? Really? "We both know if we weren't in this situation, you wouldn't have never tried to find me. I would still be a depressed, lonely workaholic and you would have finished med school and married Rebecca. Nothing would have changed and I won't just forget the last seven years like it was nothing."

"I know, Carrie, but how do you know I wouldn't have? Who knows, maybe I would've chickened out of asking Rebecca to marry me. But honestly, even if I did come for you, would you have forgiven me? Would any of this be any easier?"

"At least you would've made an effort."

"I don't expect you to forgive me, Care. I just wish you would try to work with me without making me regret trying to talk to you. I'm trying, but we can't move away from this until you want to."

"You don't think I do? Do you realize how many hours of therapy I've received? I've tried to move on, but everything I do reminds me of you. I can't get passed the thought of you and it's driving me crazy."

He stands and pulls me up off the ground, "Fine, then say whatever it is you need to say. Surely, after all these years you've come up with some big speech to say to me. Maybe it'll clear the air."

I shake my head, "That's the problem, I have nothing to say to you. I'm not as upset with you as I am myself, I can't be. If you would have trusted me, you would have told me that your parents were in trouble and we could have helped them together. So, for that, I am sorry. I'm sorry that I didn't gain that trust."

He was caught completely off guard and to tell you the truth, so was I. Deep down, I knew I didn't blame him. If I would have gained his trust, he would have told me anything, but I hadn't earned it. I loved him too much to blame him for my problems. In my eyes, he could do no wrong.

I heard the rain stop and when I went to look outside, the sun was now shining from above. I grabbed a few things I thought I would need, then I left and went back to the beach. No one asked where I was going and to my surprise, Dimitri didn't follow me. He was probably still standing exactly where I had left him.

In a way, I kind of did want him to come after me, but I also knew that I should be at the beach. Besides, I wouldn't be here long, I'm sure the rescue units were probably back out by now. They probably just flew around the storm until it passed anyway.

### Chapter Five

Silence.

Something I had missed since we landed here. No one was around, I was alone again. All I could hear was the waves crashing against the shore and the slight breeze rustling the trees. In a way, it was peaceful. I had never noticed it before, but I guess I was so caught up in helping everyone else, I never paid that much attention to our surroundings.

It was nice being on my own again, but I couldn't help but wonder what everyone else was up to. They were probably checking out the stream, finding food somewhere. I should be helping, but someone needed to stay at the beach...

Since no one was around, I took the time to bathe. I felt and looked terrible and I didn't need a mirror to tell me that. Luckily, after I finished, I remembered that I had seen a hair brush in one of the carryon's I had found. I looked through the stuff I had brought back with me and found it near the bottom of the suitcase.

I brushed all the tangles away and, eventually, ended with straight, tangle free hair. Something I had missed in the now five days we had been here. Every time I added another day, the more my heart sank. Five days was a long time...

Why hadn't they found us yet?

I was afraid that I would run out of medication before we were rescued, I only had a few more days left... I was a nurse, I knew all the side effects of antidepressants and I knew if you stopped taking them on short notice, they could really mess with you and that's something I didn't want to see for myself.

When the sun was directly overhead, I was quite bored. I didn't have anyone to check on or talk to. I never thought I would complain about being alone, but it was getting kind of old. Maybe I should walk back up to the cave and see if Ryan's doing alright. I'm sure Dimitri has checked on him, but I think I should. After all, I was the one that treated him in the first place.

It didn't take me long to make up my mind and within a few minutes, I was heading into the tree line. All I had to do was walk straight through until I found the stream, it wasn't too far anyway. I did make a few stops at some banana trees and collected the fruit for lunch.

I had stopped to rest when I heard some rustling up ahead. Was someone running? "Oh my God! You're here!" Sarah appears, breathing heavily.

"Something wrong?"

"Dimitri sent me to come and get you! He needs your help! Come on!" She seemed to be in shock, so I didn't ask questions. She took off running and I followed her all the way to the cave. Everyone was standing in a circle, near the entrance.

"What's going on?" I ask, pushing my way through. A woman is on the floor, Dimitri hovering over her, trying to keep her still.

"Thank God you were close! Find that medical bag you fixed and give me something to knock her out!" He was serious. Oh, crap. I started throwing bags around the cave until I found what I was looking for.

"Hydrocodone?" I ask, throwing him the bottle. He forcefully opened her mouth and stuck a tablet under her tongue. People were crowding us and I was losing my patience.

"Everybody out! Right now!" I yell as they all stare at me as if I had committed some crime. "Now!" I add sternly as they turn and walk out of the cave. I turn back to Dimitri, "What's wrong with her?" He reaches down to her shaking arm and flips it over for me to view. Two puncture wounds.

Snake bite.

"This is going to take too long. Forgive me, Hannah." He sits her up and presses his index and middle finger to the right of her neck. She falls back, unconscious.

"How'd you do that?"

"Army teaches ya a few things..." He mutters looking down at the wound. "Please tell me, for some unknown reason, we have anti-venom..."

I shake my head, "Afraid not." Both of us knew the only way to treat a fatal snake bite was anti-venom and considering our situation, finding some was impossible.

Suddenly, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a knife, "See if anyone has a watch out there. Hurry!" I wasn't sure what he was doing, but when I came back with Sarah's watch, I figured it out. He cut the puncture wounds open and tied a cloth around Hannah's upper arm, restricting the blood flow as good as he could. He was going to try to suck the venom out...

With his mouth.

I looked away, "Ah, Dimitri. You know there's only like a ten percent chance that could work. How long has it been since she was bitten?" I ask, keeping my head turned.

"Fifteen minutes or so... I know the chances are slim but I have to try, it's her only hope. Time me for thirty minutes." I hear him spit the blood out as I cringe. I can handle surgeries and all, but somehow the whole 'vampire' thing, gets to me.

It's just disgusting.

He never said another word, he continued his process until I told him time was up. Well, I didn't have to, she stopped breathing a few minutes before I called time. Then he started CPR, but he was too tired, so I stepped in. I knew she was gone, the venom had already reached her heart and circulated throughout her nervous system, there was no hope of saving her.

After ten minutes of trying to restart her heart, I pulled away. She wasn't going to come to again. It was over. Dimitri leaned up against the wall and pulled his head into his hands. I sat next to him as I saw Sarah peak around the cave. I shook my head as she nodded and went back to the cave, probably to tell the others.

I knew he felt bad for this, I did too, but there was literally nothing we could do. We didn't know what kind of snakes were on this island and we still didn't have any anti-venom, even if we did, it probably wouldn't have been the right kind. Whatever the snake was, it had some wicked venom to kill a person within an hour.

"There was nothing you could do..." I add, trying to make him feel a little better. He shakes his head, stands, and walks out of the cave. I didn't follow him, I wanted to, but I didn't. I sat there, praying that someone would come find us. I couldn't take losing any more people, this was too much, even for me.

Even though it had been seven years since Dimitri and I had been together, I still knew him. This would be hard on him, he really cared about people, even ones he didn't know. He wanted so badly to save her, I mean, he tried something most Doctor's wouldn't even think about.

He wasn't a selfish monster, he was a hero.

### Chapter Six

After Dimitri left, I went out and told the others what had happened. They didn't think she would make it, considering we didn't have any anti-venom, but they had hoped for the best. I explained what Dimitri had tried and a lot of them were surprised that he would go to such a length to save someone, especially a complete stranger, but he was going to be a Doctor, it was his job to save people.

The guys went inside and removed Hannah from the cave. They carried her into the forest a little ways and gave her a proper burial, as they had done before with the crash victims. All this got me thinking... When we were rescued, think of how difficult it'll be for the families that realize their loved ones aren't coming home... At least, right now, they have a little bit of hope.

I really felt bad for Hannah's family, though. She was traveling with her brother and he was one of the many that didn't survive the plane crash. Now, her family had lost two of their loved ones.

How brutal could this island be?

Now, we were all a little skittish. Hannah had been bitten while picking some berries in the forest and that meant we had to be a lot more careful. We didn't even know what the snake looked like, we just knew whatever it was, it was deadly and we had to be cautious.

That evening, everyone was sitting in the cave, reminiscing about their life back home. Everyone except Dimitri. He had been gone quite a long time and I was getting a little worried. I told everyone I was going to get some water from the stream, which wasn't a lie, I was thirsty, but that wasn't all I did.

It was almost sunset, but thankfully there was enough light left to roam the island for at least another hour or so before it became dark. I walked a little ways up the stream in search of Dimitri, but there was no sign of him. He wasn't here and there was only one other place he would have gone...

The beach.

I went back to the cave and told everyone I was heading back to the beach. I told them if Dimitri came back, to leave him be, he was a little upset over losing Hannah, and they seemed to understand. I gathered my things and headed into the forest. I didn't really want to travel in the dark, especially with that snake around, so I kept a pretty good pace. I was practically sprinting all the way there, never stopping for anything.

I passed safely through the tree line just as the sun disappeared from the horizon. The beach was quiet, except for the waves washing up on the shore. It was peaceful. I looked to my left and saw a dark figure facing the ocean.

Dimitri.

I quietly walked over and sat down next to him. "What are you doing all the way out here? Everyone was wondering about you."

At first, he doesn't respond. Then, he takes a deep breath and mumbles, "You said someone needed to stay out here, so I silently volunteered."

"And I volunteered first. You were supposed to stay at the cave with everyone else."

"I think it's better if we switch... You should stay up there, you can help them more than I can." I roll my eyes and face him.

"I am the nurse. You are the Doctor. You should be there, not me. We both know that you couldn't help her, the venom had already circulated through her body. Her organs were shutting down."

"But if I hadn't have tried to knock her out and just started the suction technique, she'd probably be alive right now."

I shake my head, "You did the right thing, stop worrying. You couldn't help her." When he didn't say anything, I knew he was finished talking. So, I got up and started toward my usual spot near the tree line.

"Carrie..." He mutters. I turn back to him. "I'm sorry I left you. I really am. I wish I told you why I left, it wasn't that I didn't trust you. I just didn't want you to put your life on hold because I did. Honestly, that's the truth, believe it or not. I wanted to come back for you, but I guess fear got the best of me. I was afraid to see you with someone else and for that, I am truly sorry."

I could tell, he really meant it. I knew him, probably more than I knew myself. I could tell when he was lying and he wasn't. I also knew that it took a lot of courage to say that to me and for that I was grateful. "I know," I whisper and continue toward my spot.

I wanted so badly to just hug him, but I couldn't. He had hurt me, but I knew that after what he said, I would forgive him. It had been seven years, I had to make peace. I couldn't continue with my life until my past was my past. It was the right thing to do.

Before I laid down, I took my medication. What I saw in the bottle startled me. This was the last one. After this, I was completely out and it was up to me to finally face my fear. A part of me was ready, but the other couldn't help but dread what was to come. I knew the next few days would be a struggle, withdrawals were never friendly but I was a strong, independent woman. I could do this.

I swallowed the pill quickly and tossed the bottle to the side. That was when I noticed he was watching me. "That was it?" He asked.

I nodded and laid down. "You can do this, Carrie. We can do this."

That night, I pretended to fall asleep, but really prayed for hours that someone would find us before I became delusional. I knew how these things worked, the longer you had been on them, the more severe withdrawals could become.

Honestly, I was terrified.

### Chapter Seven

Two days.

Two days seemed like an eternity here... I couldn't separate my thoughts often times and it was hard to focus on just one thing. It was like time stood still. An hour could pass and to me, it could feel like a day. I was tired, I wanted to sleep day and night, but I couldn't. My mind wouldn't rest.

I knew withdrawals were bad, but I had only missed one pill so far. In a few more hours, I would miss another, but I didn't expect it to be so quick. I thought it took days to experience symptoms... No wonder my psychiatrist told me to make sure I didn't skip a dose. If I knew then what I knew now, I would have never taken those pills. If it was this bad already, imagine what I'd be like in a few days...

Since Hannah passed, Dimitri has been keeping to himself. He checks to see how I'm doing every now and then, but that's as far as our conversation has gotten since he apologized. However, I did get him to move back to the cave. It really didn't take much convincing since it started raining again.

Now, it's been raining almost a solid day. There was no wind or thunder, just rain. Everyone talked amongst themselves while I stayed in the back corner. Since there was a curve in the cave, no one could see me. I was alone, except for Dimitri. He wasn't directly beside of me, but he stayed where he could see me at all times. It was kind of annoying but I knew he was only trying to make sure I was alright. And at this point, I was getting worried about myself.

Instead of sitting up, I tried laying down once more. I wanted so badly to sleep but I couldn't. My mind kept thinking. It was almost like I wasn't in control of my own thoughts anymore. I mean, I would think about things I needed to do when I got home and then all of a sudden, it would switch to Dimitri. No matter what I thought about, it always went back to him. Sometimes, I would remember us in high school, like the first day I met him or our first date. The time he almost got busted for sneaking in my window in the middle of the night. They weren't bad memories, they were the good, but I still didn't understand why I couldn't control my thoughts.

I was restless, I tossed and turned constantly. No matter what I did, I couldn't doze off. "I can try to find something to make you sleep if you'd like? I think I saw some sleeping pills earlier." Dimitri says as I turn over on my back.

"No, I have to do this on my own. I'm not going to get addicted to some other medication just so I can get over this one."

"You're not going to get addicted. You can't think straight if you don't sleep. You've been awake for three days. It's not good for you and it's probably making everything else worse."

He was right, sleep deprivation could actually make withdrawals worse. "Fine."

I heard him rise and walk away. He was only gone for a minute before coming back with the medical bag. He found a bottle and handed me a pill. "That should work. You should be out within a few minutes."

After I took it, he went back to his spot against the wall. I waited for sleep to take over and decided to ask him something. "How bad do you think I'll get?"

"Carrie, you'll be fine. Your body just has to adjust to not having the medication."

I didn't say anything else, I just hoped he was right. Soon, my eyes began to feel heavy and before I knew it, I was finally asleep...

"Carrie, come on! You have to be a little curious! You guys would be so cute as husband and wife!" Heather squealed as we walked out of class.

"I never said I wasn't... I just think that Dimitri wants to wait until we're out of college. I mean, we're so busy with all of our classes, we wouldn't have time to plan a wedding." I shrug.

She cocks an eyebrow, "I've known you for almost ten years! You mean to tell me, that if he proposed right now, you wouldn't make time to plan your wedding?"

Okay, she got me. "Well, if you put it like that."

"Exactly. Who wouldn't marry him? He's an angel." I glare. "And he's all yours."

I chuckle, "Yeah, that's what I thought you said." We walked to the cafeteria and found a few of our other friends. They were all gathered around a long table, chatting about spring break. Heather and I took our seats near the end.

"So, Carrie, what do you think? We're trying to decide where to go. I vote Virginia Beach but everyone else is wanting to go to Mexico." Kevin asks.

"Mexico sounds fun, but I think we should stay in the U.S. I mean, it's only a week. Mexico sounds like something for a summer vacation."

"That's true..." They all mutter. They always ask me my opinion cause usually, I'm the only one that thinks logically.

Suddenly, hands slip over my eyes. "Guess who?"

I smile, "Hmmm. Brad Pitt?"

Dimitri chuckles and sits down on the other side of me. "You wish!"

"No, I don't. I think he's highly overrated. I'm perfectly happy with you." He smiles and gives me a longing kiss. I loved when he kissed me like this, it was so full of passion.

"Get a room, you two!" Kevin whines as everyone else laughs. I pull away and immediately feel my cheeks flush.

_"That can be_ arranged, _" Dimitri responds, smiling. "So, what's everyone talking about?"_

And then, all of a sudden, the scene changes. I'm no longer in the cafeteria, I'm at our house. I'm in our bed. I turn over as I hear a noise beside me. It's Dimitri, he's throwing his things into a suitcase. "What are you doing?" I ask as he continues pulling things out of the closet.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry! I should have told you sooner, but I couldn't! I just couldn't... I have to leave..." He zips up his suitcase. "I dropped out, Carrie. I'm being shipped out today."

I shake my head, "What are you talking about? Shipped out for what?"

"The army. I have to go... Please don't blame yourself. This is about me, I have to do this for me." And with that, he was gone. I sat there, unable to process what had just happened. He just left? For the army?

Reality hit me like a ton of bricks, tears began to fall freely as I reached for my phone and started calling him. "You've reached Dimitri Kozlovski, leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can." Beep. "Dimitri? Answer me! Please come back! You can't do this to me!"

"Carrie? Carrie! Wake up!" Someone was shaking me. Sleep left me in a hurry as my eyes flew open. Dimitri was hovering over me. He looked worried. "What was that about?" He asks, pulling me up to a sitting position.

"What was what?"

"You'd been asleep for almost five hours and then you just started panicking? Were you dreaming?"

"Oh, uh, yeah. Sorry 'bout that."

"Well, what was so bad?" He asked, curiously.

I couldn't tell him it was about him, not after he apologized and all. I was supposed to be over this. "I-I was running from a snake. I thought it was the one that bit Hannah." I lie.

"Oh... It was probably nothing. Try to go back to sleep." He stood and went back over to the other side of the cave. I laid back down but refused to close my eyes... What would happen next? I hated nightmares, especially this one. It wasn't new, I had been having that same dream over and over ever since he left. And now, it was time to get over that. It was done.

I could feel him watching me and a few minutes later, he came back over and laid down next to me. "Go back to sleep, Carrie. I promise I'll wake you up if it happens again." His voice had a slight sadness hidden within it... Did he know? Of course, he did... He could always tell when I was lying and I guess seven years apart couldn't change that.

I've heard, ever since I was a child, that time moves on and people change. I had believed that and until now, never questioned its truth. He was still Dimitri, he was still the man I had fallen in love with all those years ago. He had made a mistake and owned up to it, I had to let it go...

It didn't take me long to fall asleep again. I felt safe with him next to me and when sleep took over again, I was a little upset that it did. I wanted to savor the moment because now, on this island, you never knew if it would be your last.

### Chapter Eight

_Dimitri's Point of View_

She slept peacefully the rest of the night, but I stayed awake to make sure it didn't happen again. I was really starting to get worried about her. I didn't expect the symptoms to arrive so early, I mean, usually, it at least took five to seven days but in her case, it was only two...

First, she was tired and restless, which was the usual first signs of withdrawals, now she was having nightmares and I noticed, while she was sleeping, that her pulse was elevated. Yet another sign of withdrawals. All of these symptoms were occurring at an unbelievable rate. I didn't know how much longer it would be before it became severe and honestly, I was afraid that I couldn't help her.

Usually, when you've been on antidepressants for so long, Doctor's try to slowly wean you off of them and if for some reason they stop them all together, they try other drugs to counteract the withdrawal symptoms. I couldn't choose either of those choices and I had no idea how to keep her from completely losing it.

But I wasn't giving up. It was my fault that she was on the medication in the first place. If I would have just checked up on her when I came back, maybe we wouldn't be in this situation... I was such a wimp. I was so afraid that she was happy, even though that's what I had hoped for. I wanted her to move on, I wanted her to have the family she had always dreamed of and I was so terrified to see that come true with someone other than myself...

It was selfish and she deserved so much better than me. But yet, she waited for me for seven years and I wondered what she saw in me to wait for that length of time... Don't get me wrong, I love her, I always have, but she's such a beautiful and smart young woman, she could have anyone she wanted. Honestly, when she told me that she wasn't with anyone, I was shocked. I expected her to be married, have at least two or three kids, a dog, and the usual white picket fence... But no, she lived in an apartment next to the hospital, alone.

I didn't know how I was going to fix this, but I had to. I have to help her, it's the least that I could do. "Dream about anything else?" I ask as she starts to shift to the sitting position.

She glances at me as her eyes adjust to the light. "I don't think so... Why? Did I say anything?" She asks quickly.

I shake my head, "Nope, not a peep. Just wondering."

I helped her up, then we joined everyone else at the opening of the cave. It had stopped raining and some of the girls went off to gather some fruit. Carrie wanted to go, but I told her she could help me fill the water bottles from the stream. I could have done it on my own, but I really wanted her to stay where I could keep an eye on her.

She seemed fine, at first, but when I went to fill the last few bottles, I heard her walk away from me. When I turned around, she was standing in an opening in the trees. She was just staring off into space. "Carrie?" I asked, questioningly.

She didn't respond.

I stood and walked over to her. I stopped next to her and followed her gaze out into the forest.

I saw nothing. "Carrie? What are you looking at?"

She squinted and turned away. "Nothing... Just thought I heard something." She walked back to the stream and finished filling the bottles. I stood there a little longer, trying to figure out what she heard. I had no idea, the only things making any noise were the trees rustling in the wind and a few birds chirping. I wasn't sure if she really did hear something or if her symptoms were worsening...

When we went back to the cave, she went back to the corner and sat down, almost as if she was afraid or something. I followed and sat down next to her. "Something bothering you?" =

She hesitates, "No. I just don't feel like talking."

Moody much? "Okay... I'll be right outside, alright?" She nods as I walk back up front. Ryan, Sarah's husband, wanted to go see what was taking the girls so long, so I volunteered to go with him a little ways into the forest.

We had only walked about a hundred yards or so when I heard a bloodcurdling scream. I knew that voice anywhere... Carrie. Within a second, Ryan and I were running back toward the cave. When we reached it, all the guys were standing outside looking around. "Where is she?" I ask, quickly.

"She said she was going to find Sarah?" One of them responds.

Suddenly, the scream erupts again. It sounded close. I ran around the cave and saw her standing at the edge of the stream. She was hysterical. When I reached her she was pointing to the stream, "She's dead! Why didn't we hear her!" She cries and reaches out for me.

I wrap my arms around her as I look back to the stream, "Carrie? Who's dead?

She cries even harder, "Sarah! She drown!"

Ryan walks closer and looks out into the stream, "What?"

"She's not, Ryan! Go find her and hurry!" His face flushes a bit but he turns and runs off. I glanced back out at the stream and then made Carrie look at me, "She's not there, you're hallucinating."

"Yes, she is! Don't you see her? She's floating up the stream!" She refuses to look and buries her head in my chest. I knew I couldn't convince her until Ryan came back, so I stayed quiet and held her until I saw him running towards us with Sarah right behind.

I let go of Carrie and turn her around to face them, "Look." She stares at Sarah like she's seen a ghost.

Suddenly, the hysteria stops.

She was expressionless, completely blank. It was almost as if a light bulb went off and when she noticed everyone was watching her, she apologized and walked back into the cave.

I wanted to go after her, but first, I had to explain to everyone what had happened. I didn't really go into all the details, I just told them that she had been on antidepressants for a very long time and she ran out. Now, we had to deal with the withdrawals. They understood and were shocked that such a sweet person had such an awful past. I didn't comment, I really didn't care what they thought, I just wanted to make sure she was herself again.

When I went back to her, she was facing the wall, head in her hands. "I've lost it... I'm crazy..." She mutters.

"No, your not. You'll be fine." I assure her.

She shakes her head, "No, I won't. You don't understand, it looked just like her... I could reach out and touch her."

"Hallucinations seem real, you know that."

"I'm not the nurse, Dimitri. I'm not treating some psychotic patient. I am the patient! The tables turn a bit when it's you. If we don't get rescued soon, -"

I didn't want to hear what was to come after that, "No, Carrie, I promise you, you'll be fine. We got through this, didn't we?" She nods, reluctantly. "See? And we'll get through the next one and however many come after that until we beat this. We can do this, you can do this, Care."

### Chapter Nine

Insane.

I wish that I could use this in the way that teenagers do, ya know, 'Dude, that was totally insane!'. Yeah, I wish I was referring to something that was unbelievable or just totally awesome, but it was the complete opposite of that. _I_ was going insane. As in, crazy.

I had no idea how bad these withdrawals were. I mean, I was tired, shaky, moody, and just recently, hallucinating. Today was my fourth day without the medication and I was praying to God that someone would find us soon. I didn't know how much longer I could take this... Dimitri and Sarah were the only people that would talk to me, everyone else was afraid of me. I heard one of them say that if we were back home, I should be sent to an asylum.

It kind of hurt my feelings that they thought of me this way, I mean I wasn't bothering them... I either stayed in the back of the cave or I sat by myself near the stream. I wasn't a danger to anyone, so I'm not sure what made them say things like that...

Dimitri had probably been the most patient with me. Don't get me wrong, Sarah did very well, once she figured out what was going on, and I've thanked her for that, but I guess Dimitri just surprised me. I didn't expect him to just take charge like that. He doesn't usually let me out of his sight and he seems to know exactly what's wrong before I get the chance to tell him... Since I had that nightmare, he refuses to let me sleep alone, granted, I don't sleep a lot, but he won't even let me lay down unless he's around...

I'll admit, having someone follow me around all the time, does get on my nerves but when it's him, I don't mind so much... "We're going to run up to the beach real quick, you can stay here with Sarah or you can come along?" Dimitri asks, stepping around the corner.

I wanted to go, but I was so tired, I just didn't feel like walking that far. "I'll stay here. How long will you be gone?"

"Not long, we'll be back by the afternoon." I nod as he walks off and Sarah comes in to sit with me. She smiles as she enters and sits across from me.

"How ya feeling?" She asks.

"Fine for the time being..." It stays silent until the guys leave the cave. Once they're gone, she speaks up again. "So... How long have you known him?"

I look up at her, "Where'd that come from?" I laugh.

She shrugs, "Just wondering... I can tell the way he looks at you... You two aren't married are you? You never said anything."

I shake my head, "Wow, uh, no... Definitely not married."

"Just a guess... So, how do you know him? I know you two have been together, you can tell the way you look at each other."

Really? "Um, yeah... We dated about six years back in high school..."

Her mouth drops open in surprise, "Six years? And you're not married?"

"It wasn't my decision." It kind of slipped... You know, it was one of those times where your brain didn't have time to filter your speech.

She raises an eyebrow, "Oh... He ended it, then? Huh..."

"Huh? What's that supposed to mean?" I was getting quite interested in what she thought... I had never had anyone else's opinion of us since we were all happy go lucky.

"Well, it's just I didn't think of it that way. I thought maybe you had broken things off since he seems to be completely in love with you."

I was a little shocked by this, but a part of me was a little happy that she saw that in him, "You think so?"

"Seems like you still love him too... So, what's stopping you two?"

I sigh, "Long story... I'll try to make it short... We dated for six years and our sophomore year of college, he left me for the army. He didn't give me any warning, he just got up and left. I found out just recently, actually, he did it for his parents. Anyway, we had been apart for seven years until we met again on the plane."

"Wow... Wait, seven years? I believe Dimitri told us that you were on your medication seven years?" A light bulb goes off and her expression turns to sadness. "It was because of him, wasn't it?"

I nodded, "And I was the idiot to take them. Now, look where they've gotten me."

"He never came back for you?"

I shake my head. "No, he said he was afraid to see me happy without him. He was so sure I would move on and never look back... He was wrong."

"You loved him too much and you felt like if you did, you would be stabbing him in the back, much like he did to you, the day he left... Carrie, I don't know him that well, but I know he really loves you. Everyone can see that and I'm sure it killed him to leave you but he probably had a good reason and was afraid to drag you into something he didn't think you should have to be in. He's a good guy."

"Yes, I know. I've already forgiven him, but I don't think he's forgiven himself..." It didn't click until after I said it... He probably was afraid to see me with someone else but the reason he didn't come back was he was still upset with himself...

Sarah smiles. "Maybe you should help him do that... You know, all of us were on that plane for a reason. You and Dimitri could have traveled on a hundred different airlines, but instead, you picked that plane, at that time. Everything happens for a reason and I believe you two were meant to see each other again..."

She was right, we could have chosen hundreds of different flights, but we both chose that one... Why did we meet again? Peace? Love? Who knows, maybe we'll find out...

We chatted a while longer before we heard the guys come back. They weren't in the cave yet but instead, they were yelling. Sarah and I got up and went to the cave's opening. Everyone was in a circle around Dimitri and some guy named Luke. I had remembered him from a leg wound I had patched right after the plane went down.

"Dude, what if she tries to kill one of us in our sleep?" Luke yells toward Dimitri.

"She won't, she's fine. As long as someone's with her, everything will be fine."

"Ha! She's not fine! Did you see her yesterday? She wasn't in her right mind, what if she does try to kill us, huh? Or are you just going to try to talk her out of that too?" He laughs and gets in Dimitri's face. He shoves him away.

I shake my head and push people out of my way, "Do you really feel that way?"

Luke looks at me, shocked, "Well, I-I-"

"Fine! Then I'll give you a little peace of mind and leave. Have a nice day!" I went back to the cave, gathered a few things and took off toward the beach. It didn't take me long to make it and when I did, I went and sat at the shoreline.

A few minutes later, Dimitri came and sat next to me. He knew I was upset and didn't bother to say anything for a little while... "Well, you know, who needs a cave anyway? It's dark and we both know I'm a little bit claustrophobic."

I chuckle, he's always good at lightening the mood. "So, what are we going do when it starts raining again?"

He shrugs, "Well, we could have a rock, paper, scissors match until it stops... Or maybe a thumb war?" He smirks as I roll my eyes.

"Seriously, stop trying to be funny, we have to go somewhere."

"Excuse me? Trying? I don't think so, you're the one laughing."

I smile, "I'm not laughing at you. I'm laughing at your stupidity."

"Stupidity? I believe you're talking to _Doctor_ Kozlovski?" He emphasizes the Doctor.

"You're still a few months away from your degree..." I smirk, then get serious again. "Now, seriously, where are we going to go? And what are they going to do? They don't have any medical training?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it and I'm sure if something happens, they'll come to us. I wouldn't worry too much... So, want to swim?" He asks, changing the subject.

"Dimitri, you know I can't swim."

"I know, but what better time to learn than now? I mean what better place than the ocean?" I roll my eyes, I knew he wasn't serious. He knew that I refused to go any farther than I could stand, after that, I would pray to remember how to float. But he was doing a good job of keeping my mind off of things.

### Chapter Ten

The rest of the day went pretty well. I felt like myself and by the time night came, I hadn't had any episodes at all since the Sarah incident the day before. I was still tired but it wasn't anything too extreme.

I actually felt better being on the beach than I did at the cave. Nothing was really that different, except for the fact that it wasn't as dark and there weren't as many people. I think I just enjoyed being outside, I had always hated being cooped up.

That night, sleep came pretty quickly, probably due to the fact that I was so tired from traveling here from the cave. I was surprised that my mind didn't fight me into my peaceful slumber...

_"I was hoping that we could go out to Malone's_ tonight, _" Jason stated as we continued down the long corridor of the pediatric unit._

_I_ hesitated _, " Well, I was thinking of going to visit my parents but-"_

He turns to me, "Really? When do I get to meet them?"

Darn, why did I have to open my big mouth... "Uh, we've only been dating two weeks... I don't like to bring anyone home to meet my parents until I've known them a few months..." Who was I kidding? I had never brought anyone home to meet my parents since Dimitri...

"Carrie, we've only been dating two weeks, but I've known you since you started working here. Isn't that about the same?"

I quickly change the subject, "What time should I meet you at Malone's?"

"Is seven alright?"

I smile, "Perfect, see you then." We split up as I enter the break room and clock out. I knew I was being selfish with him, but I just wasn't ready for that, he was moving a little too fast for me...

I didn't have long to get ready, so when I got home, I went straight to the shower. Within about forty-five minutes, I was ready to go, so I hopped in my car and drove across town. When I arrived in the parking lot, I was right on time. Jason parked right next to me and opened the car door for me.

_He was such a sweet guy and he was so cute. He was the usual blonde,_ blue-eyed _guy and honestly, if I didn't know he was a Doctor, I would totally suspect him to be some surfer dude. He would definitely blend in at the beach._

Once we were seated at our booth, we ordered fairly quickly, and then the conversation began. "So, what are your parents like? I don't believe you've ever mentioned them..."

Why can't he let it go? "They're pretty normal, actually..."

_He shifts,_ uncomfortably _, "Come on, Carrie... How can I get to know you if you keep shutting me out? I can't read your mind, your life's not an open book... I mean, I've asked some of your coworkers about you and they know nothing about you... Don't you find that a little odd?"_

"I'm just not one who likes to talk about my personal life, is all." Suddenly, this date was getting really awkward...

"I'm your boyfriend now, don't you think I should know a little bit about the person I'm dating? I mean, I wonder if you're even interested in marriage."

I was a little caught off guard by that comment, "Marriage? Hold up, who said anything about marriage? We've only been dating two weeks."

"I know, but I'm ready to settle down. I'm almost thirty, Carrie. I don't date people just for the heck of it anymore."

I start to slide out of the booth, "Well, it seems as if you didn't make that very clear. I'm not interested in marriage right now and I think you're moving a little too fast for me." I walked away from him and went back to my car. I sat in the parking lot for awhile, just thinking about Dimitri and wishing everything could go back to normal...

My eyes flew open to look up at the moon, sitting directly overhead. Dimitri was sitting next to me and he jumped a bit when I sat up all of a sudden. "Whoa, bad dream again?"

I shake my head, "Was I saying anything?"

"You said 'Jason' a few times, by the way, who's that?"

"Remember that two-week relationship? That was the Doctor's name... Why didn't you wake me up? You told me you would?"

"Well, you weren't panicking like last time, you just said his name. But I promise, next time, I'll wake you up even if it's just one word."

"Nah, don't worry about it... I trust your judgment." Our conversation ended as we heard branches crack in the woods. Sarah appeared in the tree line, "Thank God, you all were here, we need you back at the cave." She breathes heavily

"Why? Something wrong?" I ask.

"Luke was out in the woods and he tripped over a tree root. His knee looks horrible, Ryan had to practically carry him back to the cave. I think he dislocated it."

Dimitri smirks and looks to me, "What was it that you said about karma?"

I try not to laugh and look back to Sarah, "We'll be right there." She nods and runs back off into the woods. I stand and look down to Dimitri, who hasn't budged. "Come on."

He shrugs, "I think he'll be alright until morning..."

"Dimitri..." I groan. "We're supposed to help people... Besides, remember junior year when you fell out of that tree and dislocated your knee? Remember how bad it hurt?"

"Yes, yes, I do remember that very well. But I think he deserves to suffer a little bit after everything he said."

Well, one thing sure hasn't changed... He's still just as stubborn as he always was... "Fine. Then I'll go... By myself... Into the dark, creepy forest... With poisonous snakes... And God knows what else..." I start walking into the woods. "I hope I don't have any of my episodes..." And that was all it took... He was right behind me.

"That's so not fair." He mutters, catching up to me.

"It worked, didn't it?" It took us a little longer to get back to the cave, after all, it was dark and all we had was a little flashlight to guide our way. I could tell Dimitri was really conflicted with the decision I had made to come back, but he knew it was the right thing to do. He was a Doctor, his job was to help people, but he hadn't forgiven Luke for the things he had said yesterday and I had a feeling that the things I heard, wasn't the whole story...

"After we move it back in place, we can go back, alright? We don't have to stay." I add, trying to make him a little more agreeable.

"Oh, I didn't plan on staying."

Once we arrived at the cave, I made everyone either move to the back or go outside until we figured out exactly what was wrong. Luke was in a lot of pain and he was sweating. "I'm surprised you actually came..." He mumbles.

"Thank her, not me," Dimitri adds, examining his knee.

Luke looks to me, "Well, thank you, Carrie. I was wrong about you."

"He dislocated his knee cap, looks like... I'm going to have to set it, FYI, this is going to hurt." Dimitri adds motioning for me to come forward.

"Can't you give me something?" He asks.

I shake my head, "It would take too long and the longer we wait, the worse it'll hurt. Chances are, when we set it, you'll pass out anyway." I spoke the truth, I had assisted with this too many times, almost ninety-nine percent of the patients I had, always passed out.

"Hold his leg straight," Dimitri says as I kneel beside him. I place both my hands on his leg and push down, using my body weight to help with the pressure.

Dimitri looks to Luke, "Ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be..." He grinds his teeth together as Dimitri starts to apply pressure to the kneecap. And with one swift motion, we hear a popping noise and a faint scream from Luke, who has now passed out.

We stand as Sarah comes forward, "Anything I can do?"

"Wrap a cloth, tightly, around his knee. Try not to let him put any pressure on the leg for a few days." Dimitri adds, leaving the cave as I follow.

"Hey, don't you think we should stay the night? Then we can head back in the morning?"

He stops, "You said once we did our job we could go back."

"I know, but it's late and I'm tired. Can't we just stay one more night?"

He sighs but reluctantly heads back into the cave. I smirk, knowing I've won. When I lie down again, I can't help but think of the time that has passed. We'd been on this island almost eleven days... It started to occur to me that we may never be found...

What would happen then?

### Chapter Eleven

_Dimitri's Point of View_

Eleven days.

Eleven days and still no sign of a rescue team... I was beginning to wonder if anyone was even looking for us. They should have found us by now. If the pilot knew we were going down, wouldn't he have sent out a distress signal? But then again, it was so sudden, he may not have had the chance... Still, the airport would have realized we didn't arrive and they would have started looking for any kind of signal. They should have had helicopters searching the area, but I hadn't seen nor heard a single one since we'd been here.

I couldn't help but wonder about everyone else. Second class was the only part of the plane that landed here, so what happened to first and third class? The chances of any of them surviving were slim, especially since they probably landed somewhere out in the ocean...

I stayed awake until Carrie fell asleep. Once she began to doze, I ease dropped on everyone else's conversation. They were thinking exactly the same thing. Some of them thought that it was a terrorist attack, others thought maybe the pilot was mentally ill, which was possible, I guess. But they all wondered the same thing, why hadn't we been found? What was taking so long?

I heard a few of them talk about what was waiting for them when they got back, like their family and all. That's when I realized I had nothing... When we crashed here, I lost everything and yet gained the only thing I had ever wanted... I had planned on marrying Rebecca, she was kind and selfless... She loved her job and I loved her, but I realized the only reason I had fallen in love with her was because she reminded me so much of Carrie.

I never thought I'd ever see Carrie again, but this accident had made my dream come true. I had wanted so badly to find her and tell her I was sorry for everything I had done. I never meant to hurt her, honestly, I thought I was helping her. But I made the mistake of not giving her a choice and I've paid for that lapse in judgment every day for seven years.

She wasn't the only one who dreamed of a perfect marriage, I had too. I had planned on proposing the day of her graduation. She would be able to close a chapter in her life and open a new... I would never blame my parents for anything, they raised me the best they knew how, but the person I really despised was my dad's boss. Granted, if it wasn't for him, my family would have never moved to the United States and I would have never met Carrie. But then again, it was his fault for laying off my father. He was the best worker a person could ask for and yet he let him go. He gave me the chance to meet Carrie but he also took her away from me. And that was something I could never forgive him for.

However, my parents were doing well now. My father's a successful businessman and as gratitude for helping him and my mom in their tough times, they've helped me pay off some of my school loans. Something, I'll always be grateful for.

"Dimitri? Can I speak with you a moment?" Sarah asks, nodding toward the cave's entrance. I glance back at Carrie, who's now sleeping peacefully.

"Just for a second." I follow her outside into the cool, island breeze.

"I know you don't know that much about me, but Carrie and I have really become good friends and I don't know if you'll listen to me or not, but at least hear me out." She begins.

"Okay?"

"While you were out with the guys the other day, I got some time to talk with Carrie. I asked her about you two and she told me a little bit about your past... Anyway, it took me a little while to get her to say anything, but she finally did and I'm going to tell you exactly what I told her. You both could have picked a hundred different airlines at a hundred different times, but you chose that plane. I don't think it was a coincidence, either. You two were meant to be on that plane at that time and it was meant to crash. A lot of people died but you two survived. Don't waste that opportunity, not many people get second chances at love. So don't waste it. Carrie's just as in love with you as she ever was and I know you feel the same about her. Your paths crossed again for a reason..."

That caught me a little off-guard, that was like the last thing I would ever guess to come out of Sarah's mouth. "Did Carrie tell you that?"

She nods, "She didn't lie, Dimitri. She forgave you, but you haven't forgiven yourself. The past is the past, move on, and take her back. You won't be happy until you do..." And with that, she walks back inside and lays down next to Ryan.

I stood there a little bit longer, trying to process what she had just said to me. It was so unexpected, I would have never imagined her saying that to me, but she was right. I hadn't forgiven myself and I don't know if I ever will.

A few minutes later, I went back inside and laid down a few feet away from Carrie. I was so tired, I hadn't slept that much since she started having her episodes, I was afraid something would happen to her if I didn't watch her. But tonight, I had to sleep, I wouldn't be any good to anybody if I didn't get any rest. I just prayed I would wake up if something did happen...

The next morning, I woke up to her voice, but she wasn't talking to me. "You really need to keep weight off that leg, Luke. It won't heal properly if you don't, so let Sarah do as much for you as she can, alright?"

"I'm sorry I said what I did, I don't know what I was thinking... Why don't you and Dimitri stay here with the rest of us?" Once I heard my name, I stood and picked up the flashlight we had brought with us the night before.

I came around the corner and saw her standing in front of Luke. When he noticed my presence, so did she. "Ready to go?" I ask, ignoring Luke's gaze.

She nods, "I suppose... Now, Sarah, you know where to find us if you need anything." I exit the cave with her behind me. Once we get into the forest, she speaks up. "Why didn't you say anything to him?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You're ignoring Luke. He really is sorry."

"That's nice," I add simply.

She groans, "What is up with you and your inability to forgive? He did no harm. None what so ever, except make us both a little upset. But was it that big of a deal?"

"I think somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning," I mutter.

"Bed? I don't have a bed! I believe the correct terminology would be dirt! And I most certainly did not! You're the one who's making everything difficult!" That's when I knew she really was angry with me.

I stop and turn to her, "Me? I'm the one that's making things difficult?"

"Yes! You can't forgive anything you do!" Here comes the rambling... "You can't forgive yourself for leaving me, you can't forgive yourself for Rebecca or Hannah, either. It's written all over your face and it's driving me crazy! What happened all those years ago is over and I understand that you thought you were doing the right thing, I don't blame you! I forgave you and as for Hannah and Rebecca, you couldn't save them. They were gone. Only a miracle could have kept them here. Blaming yourself isn't going to change anything. When will you see that?"

I was tired of being lectured at, so I did the one thing that I was so afraid to do. I had thought of it every day for almost seven years...

I kissed her.

### Chapter Twelve

I completely froze.

It was so sudden, I was in shock. I would have never expected him to kiss me, even though I had secretly been wanting to feel those lips against mine for so, so long... Seven years, to be exact and man, was it worth the wait.

I didn't fight him, I didn't try to push him away. Instead, I kissed him back. I wanted him to understand that he really was the only one I wanted. Why did he think I waited this long? He was the one, he always had been...

To my surprise, I was the one to finally pull away. It wasn't that I wanted to, but I suddenly became afraid... My hands were resting on either side of his face and when I glanced at them, I became alarmed...

They were red.

Red with blood.

I stared at my hands, wondering if this was really happening. "D-Do you see it?" I stutter as Dimitri follows my gaze.

"See what?" That's when I knew I was having one of my episodes. I tried to be calm, I knew it wasn't real, yet when I rubbed my hands together, I could feel the thick liquid running down my palms.

"Are you sure?" I ask again.

"What is it, Carrie? I don't know what to look for if you don't tell me what it is." I was about to respond but when I looked up at him, something caught my attention off to the side. I turned my head and when I looked around, I began to get really worried about myself.

Dead bodies. Everywhere.

Their blood on my hands.

"Carrie?" Dimitri asks, his voice filled with concern.

I hesitate, unsure of what to do. "Uh, let's pick up the pace... We'll never get to the beach at this rate..." I spin around on my heel and start walking as fast as I can through the forest. I kept my attention on the beach and never once looked down at my hands until we had arrived at our destination.

I sat down in my usual spot, just outside the tree line. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on something else. "Carrie? What did you see?" When I look back up, Dimitri's walking toward me... And about twenty other people. The same people that were lying on the ground dead just a short while ago.

Their clothes soaked in blood, their eyes filled with anger. They walk toward me like zombies, then I hear one of them speak. "You killed me."

"And me." Says another.

"No, I didn't! You're just a hallucination." I say aloud, shaking my head in frustration.

"Didn't what? Carrie, talk to me!" Dimitri pleads, kneeling beside me.

"You killed us all! Now you have to come with us." The first one says as they inch closer and closer to me.

"No! I didn't! I don't even know you! Get out of my head!" I cry and clench my eyes shut. I still hear shuffling as someone grabs me. I shriek, unable to fight them.

"Carrie, calm down! No one's here, it's just me. Focus on me." His voice was so soothing and I tried to reroute my mind. I thought about high school, college, anything I could think of that reminded me of him.

Then, eventually, the talking and shuffling stopped.

"I'm losing my mind! I can't take this much longer." I bury my face in my hands as Dimitri sits down and puts a hand on my back.

"Carrie, you're doing fine. Your mind is just adjusting to not having the medication every day, remember that old saying, your mind will play tricks on you? That's all yours is doing right now... But think, you went almost two days before you had another episode. That's progress if you ask me."

He was partially correct. It could mean progress, or it could mean that they were going to get closer together. You just couldn't time these things, they happened whenever they wanted to and it was usually when you'd wish they wouldn't... I guess that's why it had to happen during our kiss...

Wait a minute, the kiss!

It was so wonderful and yet, my stupid mind had to interrupt it!

I groan in annoyance, "What? Is it happening again?" Dimitri asks, tensing up.

"No, just thinking..." I change the subject, "So, what's on our to-do list today?"

He shrugs, "Don't know... We could always go swimming like I said before." He smiles as I roll my eyes.

"I'll pass... Any other options?"

"Well... I guess I could tell you something kind of interesting... It's a little funny that while you were sleeping earlier, Sarah pulled me outside to talk to me..." He trails off.

"What did you talk about?"

"She told me what you told her the other day..."

I feel like my heart just fell out of my chest, "What?"

"Yeah, she told me what you were talking about and kept telling me not to waste my 'opportunity', I believe that was the correct word she used..."

Oh, Sarah... "Really? Huh... Odd."

He was getting ready to respond, when lo and behold, Sarah comes running out of the woods. He turns to her, "Really? Again? We've only been gone an hour."

She nods, "I know but I didn't want to worry the others..." She extends her arm for Dimitri and me to view.

Oh God.

Two puncture wounds.

Snake bite.

Again.

Unlike the last time, I knew what had to be done. The venom had to be suctioned before it got to her heart. "How long ago were you bitten?" Dimitri asks, getting her to sit down against a tree.

"Just now." She mutters as sweat begins to form on her forehead... Her answer gave me a little more hope. We didn't get to Hannah fast enough last time, but maybe Sarah got to us in time.

Dimitri looked back to me, "I need the medical bag. You're going to have to go get it and bring Ryan back with you. I can time myself with her watch, now go!" He didn't have to tell me twice and as soon as he finished his sentence, I was gone.

I ran violently through the woods. I stumbled a few times over some tree roots but stopped for nothing. I had to hurry, Sarah was the closest thing I had to a best friend and I couldn't let her die.

By the time the stream came into view, my lungs were burning like fire, but I refused to stop. I kept the same pace all the way to the cave. Thankfully, Ryan was there.

"Come on, we've got to hurry!" I yell in between breaths.

He jumps up, alarmed. "Why? What's going on?"

I grab the medical bag, "Sarah got bitten by a snake, she came to us. Now, come on! We don't have much time!"

The others wanted to come, but I told them the fewer people, the better. She didn't need to be crowded right now. After that, Ryan and I took back off into the woods. I was so tired and I felt like my lungs were going to give out on me, but I forced myself to keep going.

I had never felt so worn out in my life, I thought I was in good shape for my age, but dang, that was a long way to run and considering my pace now, I was afraid I was going to cause myself to have a heart attack. Once I knew we were close, I gave Ryan the bag and told him to keep going, I needed to slow down. He didn't question me and before long, he disappeared a few yards ahead of me.

I slowed myself down to a sprint and eventually to a walk. I knew if you stopped abruptly after running for so long, you could actually cause yourself to go into cardiac arrest. So, once I felt my heart return to a steady pace, I sat down in between two trees to catch my breath.

I wanted to keep going and catch up with Ryan, but I couldn't. I was so tired, I felt like I couldn't walk another step. I was dizzy and light headed...

Maybe if I just... Sat down for a while...

Dimitri's Point of View

"I don't taste the venom anymore. I think you'll be fine." Sarah smiles at me as Ryan takes her hand.

"Never again will I ever let you out of my sight... What if you didn't find them in time?"

"But she did and she's fine," I add and stand to look around the beach. I wonder what's taking Carrie so long? She should've been here by now...

I go down to the shore and clean myself up. When I come back, Sarah's joking around with Ryan, I guess she's feeling better. "Now, don't over exert yourself over the next few days. You did survive a fatal snake bite, but that doesn't mean your out of the woods yet." I turn to Ryan. "Did Carrie seem alright to you when you left her?"

"Yeah, I mean, she was tired but she seemed okay."

Sarah looks at me with a worried expression, "You think something happened to her?"

shrug, "I just have a hard time believing she wouldn't be here by now... Especially since it was you..." I look up and down the tree line. "I'm going to go check the trail... I'll be back."

Ryan had told me that they separated about a quarter of a mile from the tree line. That wasn't far, which was why I was worried. Carrie and Sarah had become very good friends since the accident. I knew Carrie and I knew, without a doubt, that if anything was wrong with someone she cared about, she'd be there in a heartbeat. And now, she'd gone missing...

I didn't have a good feeling about this and the further I got into the woods, the more fear rose within me... "Carrie?" My voice echoed through the trees... No answer.

Where did she go? Had she had one of her episodes and wandered off?

All these questions haunted me. Why did I let her out of my site? Where would she have gone? Before long, that question was answered.

The twinkle from her crisp, white tank top caught my attention. She was sitting against a tree a few feet away from the path. "Carrie?" I asked again but got no response. I knelt beside her and noticed her breathing was very shallow but also rapid. I checked her pulse to find that her heart was beating pretty hastily.

I attempted to shake her awake, but when I touched her skin, I knew exactly what was wrong. It was red, hot, and dry. And she was unconscious. Then I put two and two together...

She'd had a heat stroke.

As a Doctor, I knew exactly what to do, but I wasn't in any situation to complete it. I needed to get her into air conditioning and she needed to be in an ice bath, but where was I going to get that here? Exactly.

My mind raced for ways to get her cooled off, then suddenly it hit me. Water. The ocean. I needed to get her in the water and fast... I pulled her up and threw her over my shoulder. Man, in the movies, it looked so easy...

I struggled a bit to get her to stay but eventually, I just carried her the easy way.

Bridal style.

When I made it back to the beach, Ryan and Sarah ran over to me. "What happened to her?" Sarah asks, following me all the way to the shore.

"I think she had a heat stroke." I walk into the ocean and stop once the water is just past my waist. I keep her horizontal, only keeping her head above the water. Man, if Carrie knew I was doing this right now, she'd freak. She absolutely hates water. Well, actually she's just paranoid cause she can't swim.

"I'm so sorry, man. If I knew there was something wrong, I wouldn't have left." Ryan adds as he and Sarah watch from the shore.

"You didn't know. It's fine."

"Is there anything I can do?" Sarah asks.

I shake my head, "You should be resting, but to answer your question, no. We just have to wait for her to wake up."

They stood there a little longer and then after a while, they went back and sat down against some trees. I focus my attention on Carrie's breathing for any signs of distress. Her breaths are still shallow but not quite as bad as they were before.

I kept her that way for what seemed like hours until she finally gasped for air. She tried to sit up but I wouldn't let her. "Uh huh, I don't think so. Stay put a little longer." She looks around and soon realized where she is. Her eyes go wide and her body tenses.

"Water... Water!"

"Carrie, you're fine. Seriously, it's just like five feet deep... How do you feel?"

She shakes her head, "I feel very anxious. Why am I in the ocean?" She shrieks.

"You had a heat stroke."

"No, I didn't. I was sitting by a-" She hesitates. "Oh... Why didn't I think of that?"

I chuckle, "Your nurse senses didn't tingle?"

She glares, "Funny, real funny... Well, Doctor, what's your verdict?"

"I think you'll be fine, but we'll have to go back to the cave tonight when the sun goes down. You'll need to be in the shade the next few days."

"I can handle shade, however, I can't handle water. Get me out!" She cries.

I sigh, knowing she'll win eventually... "Fine." I walk back to the shore as I notice Carrie's eyes go wide once more.

"Wait! Sarah! What about Sarah?"

"I wondered when you'd remember that... She's fine. Venom's gone."

She smiles, "Good job, Doc... Now, sit me down, please."

I do as she says and she walks toward Sarah and sits under a tree. I knew that could have been a lot worse... I think she probably had a mild heat stroke, still, she needed to take it easy the next few days.

I have to say, I think I've had more medical emergencies on this island than I've had during my internship. Snake bites, dislocated knees, heat strokes... I wonder what else is in store for us...

I sit in the sun and attempt to dry my clothes. I still kept an eye on Carrie and I couldn't help but think about our kiss. She never said a word about it. I kind of thought it meant something but maybe she didn't feel the same...

Maybe I really did blow my chance all those years ago...

### Chapter Thirteen

Once the sun went down, we all headed back into the woods. Dimitri was dead set on getting me back to the cave tonight. I knew he was right, though. Heat strokes were not to be taken lightly and if I didn't keep my body temperature at a normal level, I could have another one and it could be worse than the last. It could very well be the death of me.

Dimitri sent Ryan and Sarah in first. Ryan kept the flashlight pointing in the correct direction while leading Sarah through some of the rocky terrain. Dimitri and I were a few feet behind them. I was taking it fairly slow, trying to keep my heart rate at a reasonable level... Dimitri was beside of me, never getting even a step ahead.

I had always admired him for looking after me and even now, with our relationship status standing at 'it's complicated', he still acquires that same title. I have to say when I woke up earlier, I was afraid. I had always had a phobia of water as I was completely terrified of drowning, but even though I was practically begging him to take me back to shore, I couldn't help but feel at ease. Being in his arms again made me feel at home.

Safe.

That was when it suddenly hit me...

He had kissed me.

And I had kissed him back.

Is that why he had been so quiet? He hadn't said one word to me since we got out of the water. Had he not wanted me to kiss him back? Was it a test?

I was so confused. Even when I looked at him, he wouldn't look me in the eye. I tried, purposefully, tripping over a branch. All he did was grab my arm to steady me, then he let go and we kept on walking... No matter what I did, nothing worked. It frustrated me. I hated when people were angry with me, but it made it worse when I didn't understand why.

When we reached the cave, everyone asked a hundred questions. Ryan and Sarah answered most of them so Dimitri and I could go on to the back corner. I sat down against the wall and let the cold rock brush against my skin. I expected Dimitri to sit with me like he always had, but he didn't. "If you need anything, just yell. Try to get some sleep." He said as he started back toward the cave's entrance.

"Where are you going? Aren't you going to sleep too?" I ask.

He stops momentarily, "I'm going to check on Sarah and see how Luke's knee is. I'll just stay up here the rest of the night. Like I said, yell if you need anything." He walks off and leaves me behind.

I frown. What was his problem? And since when did he care about Luke? Sudden change of heart? I think not. I thought about confronting him about it, but I was tired and I didn't want to jump to conclusions just yet. I decided to wait until tomorrow and see how he acted then.

After I laid down, it wasn't long until sleep took over...

#~#~#~#~#~#

The next morning, I woke up alone. I thought Dimitri might have come back during the night but apparently, he didn't. So, I went to see what was going on. I got up and walked around the corner to find most of the survivors sleeping peacefully in a row along the left side of the cave. I glanced at each of them as I passed but to my surprise, Dimitri wasn't there.

I walked to the cave's entrance and looked around. The sun had yet to come up as it was still dark. I looked around the cave and saw the luminous glow from the flashlight by the stream. I followed it and found Dimitri refilling the water bottles.

The crunching of branches underneath my feet gave me away. "What are you doing? You should be in the shade."

"The sun's not even out yet... Can I, uh, ask you something?"

He looks at me questioningly, "Sure..."

"Since when did you care about Luke's knee? Last I heard you wanted to leave him lying in pain for a few hours." I add bluntly. I believe I caught him off guard with that little statement. He just kind of looked at me with a baffled expression on his face.

"And I believe you told me that I had the inability to forgive... I was just checking the swelling... What's gotten into you?"

My mouth practically drops to the floor, "Me? What's gotten into you?"

"What are you talking about? Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed again?" I glare at him. "Sorry, let me rephrase that... Did you wake up on the wrong side of the dirt again?"

"No, I didn't. I was just wondering what changed your mind?"

He shrugs, "Why does it matter?"

"Because it seems as if you were avoiding me and I just wanted to know what I did?"

He watches me for a second then continues filling the water bottles. "You didn't do anything. I'm not avoiding you." He states.

"Really? Then how come you didn't say a word to me on the way here last night and you wouldn't sleep where I did? As I do recall, you said being around everyone else while you were trying to sleep was annoying. You said they talked too much."

He paused, "Yes, I did say that, but did you forget that Sarah had just been bitten by a venomous snake only a few hours before? And Luke was still recovering from a dislocated knee? I'm a Doctor, I'm supposed to keep track of my patients..."

Okay, he wants to play that game, eh... "Alright, aren't you missing someone then? Me? According to you, I had a heat stroke. Like I said, you're avoiding me."

He shakes his head, "I think you're just upset that I didn't give you my undivided attention like I always do." Ouch. That hurt and he could tell. "I-I didn't mean-"

I interrupt him, "No, no, don't apologize. You're probably right. I guess I ran out of my antidepressants on purpose just to get your attention... I guess I made myself have a heat stroke too. By all means, tend to everyone else. After all, I'm a nurse, I'm sure I can do just fine on my own."

After that, I spun around on my heel and walked briskly back into the cave. Everyone was still asleep, so it wasn't all that hard sneaking past them without getting asked any questions. When I walked around the corner into my 'room', I sat in the back. I pulled my knees up to my chest and just sat there.

I guess this was the start of me actually being on my own.

Dimitri's Point of View

Why did I have to say that?

All of this lack of sleep was getting to me. I knew better than to say that to her, but from the way she was acting, that was what came to my mind. No, I didn't care much for Luke, but I was also the only Doctor here. I might have been upset with him before, but I still had to check on him whether I wanted to or not. It was just the right thing to do.

I still felt bad. I had, sort of, been avoiding her, but only because I thought she wanted me to. She never said a word about the kiss and I guess I thought that meant I didn't have a chance. Still, I wouldn't know for sure until I got up enough nerve to ask her, and right now, in her current mood, I was better off to wait a bit.

After I finished filling up all the water bottles, I went back to the cave and checked on Sarah's puncture wounds. They were slowly starting to heal and she insisted, on several occasions, that she was feeling much better. I knew that if there was any trace of venom in her blood from yesterday, she would have already started to show signs and if it were the same snake that had bitten Hannah, she would have likely been dead by now. So, thankfully, my procedure seemed to have worked and I was pretty certain that Sarah would fully recover in no time.

As for Luke, his knee remained in place but it still had quite a bit of swelling. Sarah helped me prop his leg up on some suitcases to keep it elevated. Hopefully, the swelling would go down and maybe in a few days, he could return to his normal activities without so much pain...

Later on that morning, I pulled Sarah aside and told her what had happened between Carrie and me. She didn't seem all that surprised and took it upon herself to try and talk to Carrie. I knew she wouldn't listen to me which is why I told Sarah in the first place. I didn't like getting people involved in my business but Sarah seemed trustworthy and I knew she was the only person Carrie would even consider talking to right now.

Sarah just walked back there a minute ago, so now all I can do is wait... I kind of thought it would take a while, but to my surprise, Sarah came back out only minutes later. She just walked out far enough for me to see her. "Dimitri? You need to come back here." She says sternly.

That was fast...

As I walked toward her, I noticed the expression on her face. She was afraid. I glanced at her questioningly before turning the curve. When I did, I saw Carrie huddled in the corner, back facing me. She was talking but I couldn't make out what she was saying.

I walked closer and when I stood only a foot or so away from her, I still couldn't understand what she was saying. She was just mumbling to herself. "Carrie?"

She turns to me quickly. But when I look into her eyes, I don't see Carrie... "What do you want?" She asks, rocking back and forth.

"Just checking to see how you were doing... Something bothering you?"

She pauses, "No, I'm just fine."

"Really? Then what were you saying earlier?" I question her.

She gets a little tense. "Nothing. Just talking to myself."

I knew something was wrong and I swear, it seemed as if she was afraid, "Carrie, is someone here with you?"

She wouldn't answer directly, but the look her face said it all. "I think we should go outside for a bit? What do you say?" She hesitates at first but eventually walks out of the cave. I tell Sarah to stay inside until I figure out what kind of episode she was having now. I had never seen her act this way.

Carrie stands near the stream, she's looking in practically every direction, almost as if she was looking for someone. When she seems a little more relaxed, she speaks up, "I don't want to go back in there..."

"Why?"

Her voice was so soft, I could barely hear. "It's getting worse." She sits down in the grass under a tree. I sit next to her and try to figure out what else to do.

"How bad?" I mutter.

She shakes her head, "I used to hear and see things that weren't there. I'd have bad dreams and all, but I would know that it wasn't real. Now, I can't tell. I can't tell if I'm really awake, I can't tell if you're really sitting here."

I knew this was coming but I kept putting it far from my mind. I kept telling myself that we would be rescued and she would get the help she needed before it got this bad. And now, that dream seemed to fade.

"Well, I assure you that I really am here and you're awake... Who did you see in there that scared you so bad?"

"Hannah, but she wasn't herself. She was mad. Angry with us for letting her die."

"But you know that wasn't her, right? She's gone."

She nods, "I know but it's just getting harder to tell reality from illusion... Can I ask you something? I know we fought earlier, or I think we did..." She looks at me for an answer.

"Yes, we did."

"Well, I'm sorry for the way I acted. I shouldn't have said anything."

"I shouldn't have avoided you, so I'm sorry."

She looks around anxiously... "I vaguely remember something you did yesterday and I'm not sure if it really happened but I'd really like to know... Did we kiss?"

Oh my God... She really didn't know. "Yes, I kissed you and you kissed me back."

I watch her facial expressions to try and get some kind of an answer from her... She smiles, "Good, I was hoping that part wasn't just my mind playing tricks on me."

Well, that was blunt... I smirk, "Ditto... You know, the whole reason I was avoiding you this morning was because I thought you didn't feel anything for me anymore... You had never said a word about it and I was afraid that I had ruined my only shot of getting you back again."

She grins and shakes her head, "Nah, you didn't blow it. It was nice from what I can remember... Does that mean that we..." She trails off.

I had been waiting a long time to hear that... "It means that I have officially forgiven myself. And before anything else happens, I think I need to figure out how to get you better..."

"How are we going to do that? I don't think anything can help unless we find some more of those pills... At least I would go back to normal..."

I slide my hand over hers, "Those pills are not the answer. It seems that you have your episodes when you're angry with someone or something. So, all we have to do is keep you calm and happy. But you're still not going to go in the cave, are you?"

She shakes her head, "I'd rather not. I'm kind of paranoid now."

"Okay, but if we're going to stay out here, we'll have to stay around the shade."

"We?" She asks.

"Care, after what you just said, there is no way you're going to get rid of me that easily."

God, I hope this works. If I could just keep her from getting angry, maybe she would have a chance of beating this.

Maybe we could actually get our second chance.

### Chapter Fourteen

Crazy.

That's exactly how I felt. I couldn't control anything anymore, my brain had a mind of its own. I couldn't tell what was real and what wasn't and I felt like I asked Dimitri a thousand questions just to figure out what was going on.

I most definitely didn't feel like myself and that was something I was terrified of. It was getting harder and harder for me to remember things and I was afraid that I would forget the little things about Dimitri that made me love him.

Later in the afternoon, Dimitri laid back against a tree and took a nap. When he fell asleep, I had Sarah search through the luggage and see if she could find a pen and paper for me. She found a pen and a small pad and brought it to me. While he slept, I decided to write things about him that I wanted to remember. Basically, I created a list, that way, when I wasn't sure of something, I could just look back in the notepad.

After about thirty minutes of scribbling, I had almost a hundred things written down. I could have written more, but I was so tired. I wasn't sure if it was part of the withdrawals or just from lack of sleep, but it seemed like I was always tired...

I put the pen and pad in my pocket so I wouldn't lose it then laid back next to Dimitri. He seemed so peaceful... So content. I could have sworn he was smiling. Maybe he was dreaming or maybe he was just happy...

I was glad that we had worked things out. But I knew we couldn't be mad at each other for long. Even back in high school, nothing he said could make me hate him. We'd had our share of fights over the years but no matter what, we'd always make up and usually within hours after the argument...

Now, that we had moved on, I was kind of anxious to get back home, but not in a bad way. I was sure that he would come back with me, that we could be together again. Start a new and maybe have that life I had always dreamed of. I knew it had been a few years but I still had that hope. I had always had it. I never moved on because I wasn't meant to. Dimitri and I were always meant to be, it just so happened that life threw us a curve ball on the way...

I laid there next to him a while longer, just watching his chest rise and fall with each breath. He was still smiling and I wanted so badly to move closer and kiss him again like we had the day before. I almost did, but I didn't want to wake him, he deserved the peace and quiet...

Since I was so tired, I decided to sleep too.

Dimitri's Point of View

I tried to reposition myself to a more comfortable spot, but I stopped when I noticed Carrie's head on my shoulder. I looked over at her. She was slumped over next to me, fast asleep. I smiled, remembering how many times this had happened before in college. Carrie and I would stay up well into the night, studying for exams until one or two in the morning. It seemed to become a tradition for us to fall asleep on the couch together the night before finals. And then wake up late and scramble to get out the door...

I knew she couldn't be comfortable so I turned away from the tree and lay flat on the ground, pulling her with me. I was surprised that she didn't wake up, instead, she faced me and curled up against me.

I was about to go back to sleep when I saw something sticking up out of her pocket. I reached down and slowly pulled out a notepad. Wonder why she had this? I flipped open the first page and read:

Today marks the fourteenth day we've been stranded on the island. Hopes of being rescued are slowly fading but we seem to be doing okay so far. I ran out of my antidepressants a couple days ago and now, I'm facing the withdrawal symptoms. I hear and see people that aren't there. I have a nightmare almost every night. The list is never ending and now, I'm beginning to forget things.

I'm having a hard time recognizing what's real and what's not but today I learned something very important... Dimitri had really kissed me yesterday and it hadn't been part of a hallucination... I think we've finally moved on and I think Dimitri's finally forgiven himself for what happened between us.

_Anyway, I'm writing this to help me remember things that were real, so_ in case _I forget, I can look back at this and maybe remember the things that seem a little blurry. As long as we're on this island, I plan on adding on to this notepad so I can remember all the good memories..._

1) I met Dimitri my freshman year of high school and I will never, ever forget that day... I hope... But in case I do, it was one of the happiest days of my life.

_2) I didn't like high school at first, I didn't want to go_ every day _, as a matter of fact, I tried to get out of it, but after I met him, I hated to miss a day, even if I was sick._

3) Our Senior Prom was one night I will never forget. He promised me that no matter which college we chose, near or far, I'd always be the one.

4) A few weeks later, we both decided on the same college and after our first year, we moved in together. Let me tell you, nothing can test a relationship more than having to live with the other person. Or at least, that's what everybody said. But it didn't bother us. We had been together for almost five years, we knew each other like the back of our hands. We actually enjoyed spending the extra time together.

5) Our second year of college was busy. It seemed like we had exams every week and we quizzed each other almost every night. Even though those times were stressful, those were the best of times. The little moments are what makes our relationship special.

6) That summer, he became distant and one morning, I woke up and saw him packing his things. He went into the army that day, to help support his parents, and he left me behind.

7) I try not to think of number six that often anymore. It doesn't really matter. I'm not angry with him anymore, he had a good reason, and the past is the past.

8) It wasn't until seven years later that our paths crossed once more.

9) I was going on vacation to Hawaii for a week and he happened to be on the same flight. It was not a coincidence, we were meant to see each other again.

10) A few hours after take off, our place crashed and we landed here. It seems like a tragedy, but for me, not so much. This island made us meet again. It made us finally talk to one another, to forgive and forget.

11) Dimitri felt guilty for leaving me, but since we've been here, he has forgiven himself, like I hoped he always would.

_12) Oddly enough, one of my favorite moments so far on the_ island _was waking up in his arms... I had, had a heat stroke and Dimitri had brought me into the water to try and get my temperature down... I hated_ water, _by the way, I'm terrified of drowning, but even though I had that phobia, I couldn't help but be a little happy. I mean, what girl wouldn't?_

I chuckle at her enthusiasm. I continue reading page after page until I come to her last note...

97) I found my true love all those years ago. I love him. And now that I have him back, I'll never let him go. If I'm reading this right now, please no matter what happens, never let him go.

Carrie stirs a little beside me, I quickly slide the notepad back into her pocket and lay back down. She opens her eyes a little, "What time is it?" She asks sleepily.

"I don't know... Probably around two or three, I'd say." I add, looking up at the sun. "Go back to sleep, we still have a while before we have to find something to eat..." She closes her eyes and shifts a little closer to me, causing a piece of her hair to fall in her face.

I gently brush it aside, "Sleep tight, angel..."

### Chapter Fifteen

When I woke for the second time, I really didn't want to get up... I was facing Dimitri, curled up against his chest with his arms protectively around me. I could feel his breath brush against my skin. I could feel his chest rise and fall with each breath. I really needed to get up and stretch, but it had been so long since we had been this way, I really wanted to take in the moment.

I felt like I had laid there for hours when Dimitri finally began to stir. I closed my eyes and pretended I was asleep. He shifted a little bit and I could feel him look down at me. "Carrie? We need to get up and check on Sarah and Luke... It's almost dark." His hand rubs against my back as I groan and keep my eyes closed. "Somebody woke up in a bad mood." He chuckles and moves away.

I groan again, "I'm still tired." I whine. Actually, I was well rested, but I just wanted an excuse to get him to lay back down.

He smirks, "Well, then go back to sleep, but I have to go check on them." He stands and starts to walk away. Well, darn. Why must he ruin the moment?

I sigh and catch up to him. "I figured you'd change your mind." He adds as we walk into the cave. Everyone is in their usual spots, talking amongst themselves. First, Dimitri walks over to Sarah, who just happens to be sitting with Luke and Ryan. "How are you this evening?" He asks her.

"Pretty good, I think. How do they look?" She asks, extending her arm to expose the puncture wounds. They were a little red, but they seemed to be healing pretty well.

Dimitri runs his finger over them and nods, "Looks good." He pulls back and stands to his feet. "No fatigue, nausea, or dizziness?"

She shakes her head, "Nope, none at all. So, Doc, think I'll make it?" She smiles.

He nods, "I think you're just fine." He turns to Luke. "And how do you feel?"

"It's not too bad, just a little sore." He replies as Dimitri mashes around on his knee. He never yelped or anything just jerked a bit.

"It seems to be healing well. You should be up in no time." Dimitri steps away from him and stands beside me. Sarah watches us carefully.

"So, where have y'all been all afternoon?" She asks, glancing at Dimitri then back to me.

"Asleep. Why? Did we miss anything?" I reply, trying to cover up the huge grin appearing across my face.

"No, no. We were just wondering..." She smirks as Dimitri speaks up.

"Well, if we're done here, I guess we can go on back." He says to me.

Luke gives him a questioning look, "Back where? Surely you're aren't talking about the beach? Didn't you see those rain clouds rolling in earlier? It's going to come a flood."

Oh no, rain... The only place that was dry was the cave but I was still a little paranoid from my last episode, I really didn't want to sleep in here. It gave me the creeps just standing in its entrance.

Apparently, Dimitri saw the horror cross my face. "I'm sure we'll manage. Come on, Carrie." He adds as I follow him outside.

"Where are we going to go? We can stay in the cave tonight, really... I'll be alright." I lie. But, honestly, where else could we go? I would have no choice but to face my fear.

His answer was quick, "No. I don't want to risk you getting into that state again... I think I have an idea... Follow me." I don't argue, I had actually hoped he would say that. Maybe he knew of a smaller cave or something nearby.

We had walked about a quarter of a mile away from the stream when he stopped in front of a large tree. "I found this a few days ago. It'll probably keep us dry, but it'll be a tight fit." As I walked closer, I see what he was referring to. There was a hole in the tree's trunk. Granted, it was a pretty large hole, but like he said, fitting two humans inside would be an interesting challenge. Not that I really minded, though...

"Well, I mean, if this is the only option, we have no choice." Suddenly, a loud clap of thunder shakes the ground.

"I don't think we have much time left to reconsider. Get in." I slide inside and scoot as far as I can against the side, so Dimitri can get in. He was right, we're literally on top of each other. "Here, I'm not sitting on you." He pulls me into his lap, which gives us a bit more stretching room.

It was a good thing we found this, cause it wasn't but a few minutes later until the rain came pouring down. "Well, this is nice..." I add, lightening the mood.

He chuckles, "You know, I kind of thought you'd be a little more argumentative since you're claustrophobic."

"True, but I guess having you here helps a bit." I blush.

"Well, I have to say, it's been a long time since I've seen you blush. I like it."

I roll my eyes and watch the rain pour outside. "How long do you think it'll be before it lets up?" I ask curiously.

He shrugs, "I don't know... Last time it rained almost a whole day..." It stays quiet for a little while as I look at our surroundings. The wood in here looks so soft, almost like it had been sanded down. I run my hand across it and pull away when I feel a sting.

"Ow!" I pull my hand back and run my finger across my palm.

"Dear God, Carrie. Must you always hurt yourself?" He mutters, assessing my hand. "Looks like a splinter... Don't move." He pinches down on the skin and then removes his hand.

"Dimitri!" I pause. "Ow!"

"It's out, calm down. Gez. As much as you've gone through lately, I wouldn't expect a splinter to make you that jumpy."

"Well, you could have given me a little warning..." Silence takes over once more. It stays like that for what seems like an hour or so. Every time I look back to him, he's watching me. But he's looking at me like he did all those years ago... So soft, sweet, and his eyes are filled with compassion.

So, while we're here and while he seems to be in a good mood, I ask him something... "Do you ever think we'll get back to the way we used to be?"

He smiles, "I don't know... But I think that we have a pretty good start..." He pulls my face to his and kisses me with such passion, I wanted to melt. Oh, how I prayed that he wouldn't let me go... "I love you, Carrie. No matter what happens."

#~#~#~#~#~#

Man, I wished that the rain would never stop...I could stay here for days without a care in the world. It was so peaceful and in that moment, I didn't think about all my problems. I wasn't worried about the hallucinations or the nightmares, I just wanted to take in the moment...

Now, it had become pitch black dark and the rain was falling at a steady pace, it had been for the past three to four hours... In that time, we hadn't slept. We talked about the island, home, life... We just caught up with each other for a while.

It wasn't until midnight or so when I started to get tired again. I wanted to stay awake to talk to him and be with him, but I could barely keep my eyes open and my head soon rested on his shoulder. "Sleep, Carrie... Maybe the rain will let up by the morning." He whispers into my hair.

"I hope not..." I mutter as sleep takes over...

#~#~#~#~#~#

When I wake up, I try not to move as I realize where I am. I almost thought I had dreamt of last night, I never thought it would be real, but boy was I glad that it was... I kept still and took in the moment, I could lay there forever and never complain...

I think he was still asleep considering the slow rise and fall of his chest and I kind of thought I heard him snore once or twice. I didn't want to wake him, so I stayed where I was, not that I really wanted to move anyway.

I had really missed waking up with him beside me. That was always one of my favorite memories of us. For about a year, back in college, I got to wake up to him every day... After he left me, I didn't sleep through the night for almost two years. I'd wake up and reach for him and he wasn't there...

But tonight, he was.

I looked outside and saw that it was still dark, you could barely see your hand in front of your face, but I knew it was still raining. You could hear the water droplets hitting the tree and considering the intensity, I'd say it was raining pretty hard... I wondered how long it had been doing this, you would have thought it would have woken us up by now...

I tried to go back to sleep, but I couldn't. Considering I had slept most of the afternoon yesterday, I'd say I had, had enough... I wanted to get up, my legs were stiff from staying in the same position for so long, but the hole in this tree wasn't tall enough for me to stand up and there was no way I was going out there.

I was still uncomfortable and I was still in Dimitri's lap. I didn't want to move but I really needed to. I eased myself off of him and sat beside him. Granted, there wasn't as much room when we both were against the back of the tree trunk, but my legs really needed a rest. Trust me, if they didn't, there was no way I would have moved away from him.

Not in a million years.

I sat there for an hour in silence. Dimitri seemed to be sleeping peacefully and I really didn't want to wake him... Eventually, the sun began to come up, but the rain refused to lose the fight so easily. The rain clouds blocked most of the sun's rays and left the day to be dark and dreary.

Suddenly, Dimitri's eyes flew open as he leaned forward and looked over at me. "What's your problem? Bad dream?" I ask.

He shakes his head, "No, I thought you left... Still raining, huh?"

"Now, why would I do a thing like that? And yes, I think it'll be a while."

"Must be a really big system... I wonder how Sarah and Luke are doing?"

"I'm sure Sarah's fine, but I'm pretty certain you don't really care about Luke." He had a certain amount of disgust in his voice when he spoke his name.

"As a Doctor, I care. As a person, I don't." He runs his fingers through his hair and turns to me. "So, how are you feeling?"

"Lovely," I smile.

"No nightmares this time?"

I shake my head, "Nope, not a thing, or at least not that I remember anyway." We watched the rain fall in silence. It wasn't awkward, it was actually quite comfortable. Every now and then, I would glance over and see that our breathing was in sync. Most people wouldn't notice the little things like that, but like I said before, the little things make it all worth it.

Soon, the rain ceased but neither of us moved... Dimitri reaches for my hand and intertwines his fingers with mine. "We should probably be getting back." He mutters.

I really did want to know how Sarah and Luke were doing and I know it probably sounds selfish, but I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to go back to the watchful eyes of the other passengers. "I don't think I'm ready just yet." So, I did the only logical thing to do. The thing that I had wanted to do earlier.

I kissed him.

He was really caught off guard at first. He was so shocked, he didn't even kiss me back. Well, he did, once he figured out what was going on... He pulled me closer to him and sat me back up on his lap. His hand ran down my spine and rested on the small of my back while the other gently caressed my face.

His touch was like no other. He was the only person that could make me feel butterflies and take my breath away all at the same time and he knew exactly that. I literally had goosebumps.

Honestly, I didn't just want to distract him, I wanted to see if we still had all the passion that we used to. I mean, it had been a long time, I had always heard that love fades over time, but thankfully ours hadn't. We still felt the same about each other and it was impossible to overlook.

He deepened the kiss a little more, making me shudder with excitement as my lungs cried out for air. He knew and pulled away as we caught our breath. He smirks, "Didn't think it would feel the same, did you?" He asks.

"No, not really."

"And?"

My answer was quick and simple, "I was wrong."

"Well, I certainly don't hear that often." He adds, playfully. "Come on, let's get back to the stream." He gently pushes me off his lap and crawls out of the hole. He stands and turns back, extending his hand to assist me. I grab it as he pulls me out.

I look around, "Well, it certainly rained a lot."

He nods, "Yeah, but now that the sun's out, I'm sure it won't take long for the ground to dry up." I knew he was right, with the temperatures out here, the puddles would be gone within a couple of hours.

He takes my hand again as we head back toward camp. I liked us this way, this was what I had been waiting for all these years. I never gave up on him and I'm glad I didn't... If I had, we might not be here right now and I may have never saw him again...

What a terrible, terrible life that would have been.

### Chapter Sixteen

When Dimitri and I arrived back at the cave, everyone was surprised to see us hand in hand... Sarah especially. She smiled when she saw us and I could tell she had a lot of questions for me. I looked to Dimitri who was heading toward Luke, "Go ahead and check on him, I'll take care of Sarah." He nods as I reluctantly retract my hand from his. I make eye contact with Sarah and nod toward the cave's entrance. She rises and follows me outside.

"So?" She asks, grinning ear to ear.

"We're talking..."

"Just talking, huh?" She adds sarcastically.

I shrug, "Nothings happened yet... Well, not really... He told me that he had forgiven himself and we're just trying to move on. I think leaving the cave yesterday helped us in many ways... We got to talk one-on-one without interruptions. We caught up on life... Did I mention we spent the night in a tree?"

Her eyes go wide, "A tree? What?"

I nod, "Yep, a hole in a tree, to be exact. We both fit, shockingly, but it was pretty tight.." I trail off as she cocks an eyebrow.

"And how did that go?"

"Good... Very good. We talked a lot and we seemed to sleep a lot better when we're together... Oh, and we had a slight make out session this morning." I felt like the little ninth grader again.

I could remember calling my best friend the night that Dimitri and I kissed for the first time. I talked to her for over an hour about it. I was so excited and I knew she was too. He was my first kiss and ever since it happened, I prayed that he would be my last.

She shakes her head, "Well, I'm glad things are better with you guys now. And just think, if you all would have listened to me in the first place, this would have happened a lot sooner." She smirks. "I'm a lot older than you think, Carrie. I'm wise beyond my years. Dimitri is the best thing to ever happen to you and you are the best to ever happen to him. You were made for each other. Don't let anything ruin that." She walks back into the cave as I look up into the sky.

I swear Sarah's an angel sent from heaven. She always knows what to say. I start to go back inside when I hear people talking... It wasn't the passengers... It was coming from the beach... It sounded like men. What was that? Was I hallucinating again?

I stood there a little longer, seeing if it would stop... It never did. "Dimitri?" I yell as he comes forward and stands beside of me. He turns his attention toward the beach. "Do you hear that? I don't know if it's just me or..."

He smiles, "No, someone's here! Guys, come on!" Dimitri runs off into the woods with the rest of us right behind. Were we saved? Could they have really found us after fifteen days? My mind was scrambling as we ran faster and faster to the beach.

When we were close, we nearly ran into a group of around seven men. They looked at us in surprise. They were wearing black jumpsuits which had a patch across their left breast that read, Rescue.

"Were you all passengers of the plane crash on the beach?" One of them asks.

"Yes!" We all cry out in joy.

The next hour or so was all a blur. We were all taken to the beach where a large ship awaited. When we boarded, we were all asked at least a hundred questions... What's your full name? Date of birth? Social Security number? Where do you live? What's your address? The list went on and on. I guess they needed all this information to figure out who we were, but they could of at least given us some time to realize what was going on.

After we finished with the questioning, we were each taken to a room on the upper deck to take a shower, change into clean clothing, and to eat real food. Let me tell you, I was never so happy to see a shower in my life. And once I felt clean again, I didn't want to get out. I just let the warm water run down my body...

It was definitely nice to wear clothes that actually fit and eating meat felt like a privilege. I had eaten so much fruit the last two weeks, I could gladly do without it for at least six months and I'm not even joking.

When I finished, I was taken to a large room that was similar to a lounge. The rest of the passengers were waiting and Dimitri motioned for me to come sit with him in the corner. He seemed a little worried.

"What's wrong?" I ask and sit next to him.

He shakes his head, "Carrie, I don't know how to explain this... While I was waiting for you, I was talking to Luke. He just came back, the Doctor on board checked his knee and praised me for all the medical attention I had provided on the island... I asked him who helped him to the boat when we heard the voices. He said Leah did and when I asked him what happened to Sarah and Ryan, he looked at me like I was crazy... He doesn't remember them."

"What? Maybe it was just shock or something." I start looking around the room.

"Carrie, I already looked. They aren't here. I even went up and asked the Captain for the list of passengers. When they sent out the rescue team, they gave them a complete list of names from the airport. That's why they were asking us questions, they were trying to figure out who was here and who wasn't. I told him that Rebecca and Hannah had died on the island shortly after we crashed, but I also got to look at the list... Carrie, Sarah and Ryan's names weren't on that list... They weren't on the plane. No one remembers them except us."

"Dimitri, you're crazy, I'm sure they'll show up..." He shakes his head. "Well, how do you explain that? Two ghosts magically helped us get back together? Are you telling me that my best friend isn't real?"

He sighs, "I don't know what we saw, but they're nonexistent according to everyone else." Then I remembered. I remembered what Sarah had told me. "I'm a lot older than you think, Carrie. I'm wise beyond my years. Dimitri is the best thing to ever happen to you and you are the best to ever happen to him. You were made for each other. Don't let anything ruin that." And that was the last time I saw her...

Angel? Was she an angel?

I look back to Dimitri who seemed to have read my mind, "Seems like it, doesn't it?"

I didn't know what to believe at that very moment. I wanted to think that she was still here somewhere, but for some reason, deep down, I had my answer... She was an angel sent from heaven to help Dimitri and I patch up our relationship... So we could move on.

Together.

### Chapter Seventeen

After the rescue team cleared the island, we set sail toward California. Once we were well on our way, the Captain came down to talk to us. "I know a lot of you have been asking questions since we found you and I would like to take the time to answer those right now... One of the most popular questions is why someone didn't find you sooner. This island you were on, is about a day and a half's journey, by boat, from California. You were still quite a ways from Hawaii but the last signal your plane gave off was just over Nevada. First, we searched land, mostly desert. It made more sense that if you lost signal there, you would likely be within a one hundred mile radius."

"But we were on an island? How did we lose signal that far back? Was it a terrorist attack?" Luke asks what everyone else had assumed.

The Captain shakes his head, "No, we don't believe so. However, it is possible that one of the pilots were in on it, but no one could know for sure since they were found dead. Your part of the plane was the only part to crash on land. First and third class landed in the ocean... Anyway, we searched the desert for almost a week, until one of the officials suggested that we begin searching off the coast of California. What's so unbelievable is that we came out here five days ago and we came right by the island and no one saw anything, it was like it didn't exist... When we got back to land, they called the search parties off, but I had a feeling to come back one more time yesterday. When I did, I found you."

An invisible island? Somehow, I had a feeling that had to do with Sarah. I mean, five days ago, Dimitri and I weren't on the best of terms... And we weren't rescued until we made up... I glance over at Dimitri, "You don't think she-" I whisper.

He shrugs, "Unbelievable, isn't it?"

The Captain continues, "Now, I know all of you want to contact your families, so we've arranged for phone calls to be made. We'll take four of you at a time so you may speak with your relatives... After we arrive in California, a press conference will be held. The plane crash was all over the news and now that CNN has announced you all have been found, everyone will want to hear your side of the story. So, be ready. After that, you'll be flown home, but don't worry. I have taken it upon myself to be your pilot, you will return home soon and safely." With that, he leaves the room and the passengers line up to place their phone call. Surprisingly, Dimitri doesn't move.

"Aren't you going to call your parents?" I ask.

He nods, "I will once everyone else gets the chance to call... What about you? I don't recall you ever mentioning your family while we were on the island?"

I shrug, "We don't really talk much..."

He turns to me, "What? Are you not going to call them? Carrie, they have a right to know that you're alive... They raised you."

"I didn't say that I wasn't going to call them, it just won't be a very long phone call, is all..." That was definitely the truth... I talked to my parents about once a month, that was it and I never saw them unless it was Thanksgiving or Christmas.

He doesn't say anything else as we listen to the chatter of the other passengers. They were all so excited to call home and then you had me... I wanted to call, I did, I just didn't know what to say and I think that was what made me put it off...

I ponder on that thought a while longer until I notice a flash from the corner of my eye. When I turn my head, I notice the double doors that lead out to the main deck have opened but no one seems to be in sight. I glance at Dimitri to see if he noticed anything. Nope, he seems to be in deep thought...

"Carrie..." Someone whispers. I look around the room, but no one seems to be talking to me... Is someone outside? I wonder. I stand and carefully walk outside. "Carrie? Where are you going?" Dimitri asks as I ignore him and walk along the upper deck. I follow the railing to the back of the boat. White light forms in the corner. I shield my eyes from the bright glow.

"Carrie? What are you doing?" I can hear Dimitri get closer.

When I look back up, the light is gone but is replaced with Sarah... Wait... Sarah? I look closer and see her smiling at me, "You are correct, my child. I am an angel, the angel of love."

"Love? What about Ryan?" I ask as Dimitri tries to get my attention.

"He was the angel of death. Many people lost their lives but don't worry about it, it was their time to go. I was there to help you and Dimitri rekindle your love for one another. It was never gone. You just needed to talk to one another again, really connect. Sorry for the harsh accident but you both are very stubborn. It seemed the only way to truly get you two to work out your problems was to confine you. However, all this didn't happen just for you two. Many of the other passengers worked out their problems as well. Whether that was trust, hate, marriage, or in some cases, forgiveness." She glances at Dimitri. "It helped everyone in some way... Now, I have fulfilled my duties. It's all up to you and him now, but don't worry, you may be stubborn, but you're one of the strongest young ladies I've ever met... Never let him go." She smiles again before the light appears once more and then flickers out.

Dimitri places a hand on each of my shoulders, making me face him. "What are you saying? No one's here, Carrie."

I grin, "Sarah was... She really was an angel."

He stares at me a moment, "You saw her?"

I nod, "She told me why we were on the island-"

He cuts me off, "Come with me." I follow him down the stairs to the lower deck. We walk past some offices until we come to a room painted in white with an examination table in the center. A man is sitting on a stool next to the table.

"Dimitri? Something wrong?" He asks, looking up from his chart.

"Would you be willing to take a look at someone for me?"

Me? Was he talking about me?

He thought I was a hallucinating... But I wasn't! It was Sarah! I saw her and she spoke to me! It wasn't a hallucination, I would know... Wouldn't I?

Of course, I would! Besides, it was Sarah... She was an angel... Right?

Dimitri's Point Of View

Carrie was likely to be upset with me, but I knew I had to do this. Actually, I should have brought her here as soon as we were rescued. She had gone so long without the medication, she needed to be checked out by a Doctor and get the help she needed.

I knew she would eventually question me on Sarah's appearance. She probably thought I only brought her here because I thought she was hallucinating. But honestly, I wasn't sure if she was or not. Granted, I didn't see her, but after being on that island with people who supposedly didn't exist, anything's possible.

"Of course, I can take a look." He adds as he stands from the stool and faces me. "What's the problem?"

"Actually, could I fill you in first?" I ask, nodding toward Carrie. He gets the hint and walks out into the hallway. I look back to her, "We'll be right back." When I shut the door to the examination room, Doctor Daniels sighs.

"I have a feeling that her condition is the worst?"

"Carrie has been on antidepressants for seven years. While we were on the island, she ran out of the medication and has been without it for eight days. At first, she suffered from nightmares, then she started having fatigue but also the inability to sleep at times. A few days after stopping the medication, she started suffering from hallucinations and within a forty-eight hour time period, they became extreme. She hears and sees people that aren't there. She needs help ASAP."

He's stunned. "Well, I would have never guessed that... The withdrawal symptoms seem quite severe... Do you think she may be developing extreme psychosis?"

I shrug, "I don't know, which is why I think the quicker we get to California, the better. I want her to see a psychiatrist. She used to see one before the accident and I think it would do her good to go back."

He nods, "Agreed... Let me just ask her a few questions, then I'll see if I can pull her medical history and talk with her previous physician."

When we walk back inside, Carrie's sitting on the examination table and she doesn't look happy. "Can I go now?" She asks impatiently.

"First, I would like to ask you a few questions... Is it true that you've been taking antidepressants for seven years?"

She nods, "Yes."

"And you ran out six days after you crashed on the island?"

"Yes."

"What were your first withdrawal symptoms?"

"I had nightmares, I was tired, and eventually started hallucinating."

"Have you ever had suicidal thoughts?"

"No!" She answers quickly.

"Have you ever thought about harming other people?"

"No, what kind of questions are these? I feel like I'm being interrogated."

He apologizes. "I'm sorry, it's just protocol... I think you should get some rest. I'll arrange for a room." He walks out the door and leaves us by ourselves. It stays quiet and I can tell Carrie is upset.

"I just wanted his opinion, alright? Doctor to Doctor."

She shakes her head, "I don't want his opinion. I'm fine. You said as long as I stay happy and calm, nothing will happen and it hasn't. Now, you've gotten me angry. Thanks for that, by the way." She adds sarcastically.

"Carrie, you're a nurse. You know you need to be evaluated by a physician. You may feel okay right now, but that medication can also treat chemical imbalances within the brain. When you stopped taking them, it could have set off a chain reaction. Am I right?"

She hesitates. "You know too much... I just thought you brought me here because I saw Sarah and she really was there!" She pleads.

"I didn't bring you here because of that, I did it to make sure you were alright. I didn't see Sarah, I don't know, but after the last two weeks, I don't know what to think."

The door swings open, interrupting our conversation. "I've arranged for a room, please follow me." Doctor Daniels says. I help Carrie off the table and then we follow him out into the hallway. He walks down the long corridor and up a flight of stairs before stopping at a door next to a large wooden sculpture. "The rest of the passengers will be showed to their rooms shortly. This suite was recommended by the Captain himself, he would like to thank you both for giving such excellent medical attention on the island."

Once he pushes the door open, Carrie and I are both in awe. It's almost like an apartment. It has its own foyer, kitchen, living room, bathroom, and if I'm not mistaken two bedrooms. "Is this what all the other rooms look like?" Carrie asks.

"Kind of, this one is for the Captain's special guests. Sometimes his family stays here, but tonight, it's all yours..." He looks to me. "I'll be calling you within the hour." I nod as he exits the room.

Carrie explores the kitchen as I check out the bedrooms. "Looks like we both get our own room," I add, walking back into the kitchen.

"Maybe I don't want my own room." She adds, looking into the fridge.

I cock an eyebrow, "Oh, really?"

"Really, but it'll be nice to sleep in a bed tonight. Dirt was getting old... Very old."

I chuckle, "I think we can all agree with that."

The rest of the evening was quiet and it was nice to spend time alone with Carrie. We fixed dinner together and watched late night movies... It kind of reminded me of what we may be like if we had married. I had fantasized about that moment for years and now, maybe one day it would come true...

Doctor Daniels called exactly when he said he would. He had pulled Carrie's medical records and contacted her previous psychiatrist. He explained her situation and she would like to meet with Carrie as soon as we land. So, that means, we won't be at the conference. The Captain has agreed to fly us back early since it was very necessary. We were told that CNN was quite upset that we weren't going to be there, but according to the Captain, they just told them it was an emergency.

Speaking of phone calls, I was finally able to contact my parents. They had actually already heard the news since the survivors names had been released. They had been waiting for me to call them and they couldn't wait for me to come home. I, of course, had to explain to them that it may be a few days because of Carrie. They were very surprised that we had run into one another again and they kept telling me that I needed to bring her home with me. They had always liked her.

As for Carrie, I eventually managed to get her to call her parents. She tried to mention me, but they didn't really want anything to do with it... They kept telling her that they were glad that she was alive and that was pretty much it... Sad, really...

That night, we got ready for bed and slept in the master bedroom. I think the only reason Carrie didn't want to sleep in the other room was because she was afraid of having nightmares and to be honest, I didn't blame her.

"I know I have to go to my psychiatrist when we get back, but what happens after that?" She asks once we get underneath the covers.

I face her, "What do you mean?"

"What happens to us? To you?"

I had been thinking the same thing. "Funny you mention it. I can finish my internship at the hospital you work at and I was thinking... Maybe after a date or two, we could pick up where we left off?"

She smiles, "And where was that?"

"Maybe we could move back in together?"

Her smile grows wider, "I'd be delighted."

### Chapter Eighteen

Last night reminded me a lot of what Dimitri and I used to be like. We always loved to cook with one another, although, most of the time, everything ended up burnt or all over us. He always started food fights and sometimes, we would stay up all night just trying to clean up after ourselves. Most girlfriends would totally flip and make him do all the cleaning, but not me. It was a team effort to make, so it should be a team effort to clean up. And of course, I never complained about spending time with him. No matter where we were, if we were together, we were happy.

After we made dinner, we had a late night movie marathon. That was probably my favorite part. When I woke up this morning, it was almost ten, so I went downstairs and ate breakfast with everyone else. I decided to let Dimitri sleep in a bit, he deserved it. I knew he would probably get a little frustrated with me, but he'd be alright.

The Captain informed us that we'd be arriving in California within the next few hours, then he pulled me aside and told me what Dimitri and I would be doing. It was around that time when Dimitri joined us. "Just in time. I was just about to explain your schedule." The Captain adds.

"Sorry, someone didn't wake me up this morning..." He glances at me then back to the Captain. Yep, I called it.

"You're fine... So, once we arrive at the bay, they'll be cameras and reporters everywhere. Once we leave the boat, everyone else will be taken to a nearby hotel for a press conference. They'll be four SUV's lined at the gate, we will be getting into the last one. From there, we'll be taken to the airport where a private jet will be waiting. After we take off, it'll take about seven to eight hours to get you back home. Sound good?" He asks as Dimitri and I both nod in agreement. "Alright, I'll see you in a few hours."

With that, he leaves us on the flight deck by ourselves. Dimitri turns to me, "I'll forgive you this time," He smiles. "But next time, I may not be so forgiving." He jokes. "So, have any ideas on what to do for the next couple of hours?" He smirks, slipping one arm around my back and pulling me closer, making my breath hitch.

"Actually, I do. I heard some of the girls mention sunning this morning on the upper deck. I think I'll go join them."

He pulls back, shocked. "Sunning? We've been on an island for two weeks! Don't you think that's enough sun?"

I smirk, "Nah, a girl can never be too tan..."

He glares at me, "Then what am I supposed to do?"

I shrug, "I don't know... Why don't you go visit Luke or something?"

I smile once more before he sighs and walks off.

I hung out with the girls until we arrived at the bay and man, I wished I hadn't... I enjoyed girl talk and all, but I felt bad that I kind of pushed Dimitri away... I mean, it was only meant to be a fun game.

But the bad thing was, I had forgotten to put on sunscreen and now, I was sunburnt. Smart, Carrie, real smart... When we met the boys downstairs, I was afraid to face Dimitri, I felt so stupid, and when he saw me, his jaw dropped. "Carrie, you didn't." He mutters, walking closer to me.

"Yeah, I might have forgotten a little something..."

He shakes his head, "I think it might be sun poisoning..." He reaches down and tries to examine my arm but with one touch, I pull away.

"Ouch!"

He gives me a slightly worried expression, "How are you even wearing clothes?"

"It's not pleasant, I assure you."

The Captain interrupts, "Here we go." He adds and walks by. The boat comes to a halt as we arrive at the bay. People are all over the place, reporters, photographers... The gate opens as we form a line and walk out onto the pier. Everyone is asking a ton of questions, "How does it feel to be back home? Were you afraid? When will you be reunited with your families?"

No one responds to them, we just kept walking. Once we made it to the SUV's, we separated quickly and within a two-minute time span, we were out of everyone's view. It didn't take long for us to get to the airport and the odd part is, we never actually went inside. Our SUV was escorted into a back entrance and we parked directly by the plane.

The Captain wasted no time, quickly getting us onto the jet. "Now, if you need anything, just press this button, it'll signal me from the front." He points to a black button against the back wall. "The bedroom's in the back, there's a bathroom next to it, and the fridge should be fully stocked. I'll let you know when we're close." Then he disappears into the front of the plane.

"We really need to treat that sunburn..." Dimitri adds as we sit in our seats.

"And how do we do that?"

The Captain comes over the speaker, "Please fasten your seatbelts and stay seated until I give you the all clear." We both follow his directions as we feel the plane start moving.

Dimitri continues, "Well, where is it the worst?"

"My back and arms."

He thinks a moment, "We could cover you in lukewarm towels or you could take a bath. Whichever you prefer."

Hmmm, that bath sounded really nice, but I really didn't feel like moving all the much... "Let's try the towels first."

"If you say so..."

A few minutes later, the Captain comes back on, "It's safe to move about the cabin." I get up and follow Dimitri to the back. "Lay down and take off your shirt."

"Bossy much?" I add as he disappears into the bathroom.

I do as I'm told and lie down on my stomach. I hear him come back in and then I feel the cold towel press against my back.

I gasp.

"What did you think? It ain't going to feel very good until you let it soak into your muscles." He adds, laying down beside me. "This is not how I imagined this flight..." He smiles.

"I'm just as disappointed as you are."

"And yet you did this to yourself?" He chuckles. "So, after you meet with your psychiatrist, what do you say we go visit my parents for a day or two?"

"I'd love to."

God, I felt like a teenager again... I'm meeting the parents! Again! And we haven't even been on our first date. Well, at least not technically.

We really were together again and man, I hoped, this time, it was for good.

#~#~#~#~#~#

After about eight hours, we finally landed at the airport. It seemed like it took forever to get back home, but not being able to do much probably contributed to my boredom. All I did was tend to my sunburn and the longer I did, the more angry I became. Why did I have to forget sunscreen? I mean, really? Why me?

Even through my stupidity, Dimitri still tried to help me. But that's why I loved him, no matter what I did, he always forgave me as I did to him. He'd always been like that and I was glad that he hadn't changed.

While we were waiting to leave the airport, we talked a little bit about his family. I actually got up enough nerve to ask him about his parents... I had tried to reach out to them after he left for the army, but they refused to have any contact with me. That's why I was surprised to hear that they were excited to see me again. But Dimitri informed me that he told them to leave me be. It was all in his plan for me to move on, which failed miserably, I might add.

After we left the airport, we were each taken home. I was first and when we arrived at my apartment, I noticed someone was in my parking spot. Where was my car? I became a little suspicious, so the Captain and Dimitri came with me to the landlord's office.

"Oh, Carrie! I couldn't wait to see you! I just heard the news!" Cassandra runs toward me and engulfs me into a hug. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

I pull away, "Yeah... Do you know who's in my parking space? And exactly where is my car?" Her expression changes quickly.

"Well, uh... You have to understand that you had been declared missing and then the search parties were called off... So, I had no choice but to rent out your apartment... Your parents came by and got all your things."

I was gone two weeks and she sold my apartment? Really? "But I was only gone two weeks? Why would you sell it? I've lived here for years."

"I know, Carrie, but you have to understand my position. Your rent was due last week and I have a boss too, you know."

I was so tired and upset, I didn't even bother to argue with her. "Fine. Have a nice day." I add and walk back to the car with Dimitri and the Captain right behind me. "So... I guess you'll be moving in with me, then?" Dimitri asks once we get back into the car. That's not a bad idea. I really don't want to move in with my parents...

"Are you sure?"

He nods, "Of course, I have plenty of extra room."

"Well, if you say so... But I'll still look for another place to live."

He shrugs, "We'll see about that."

We drove almost thirty minutes out of town to a quiet little subdivision just outside the county line. After all these years, Dimitri and I were only thirty minutes apart? You've got to be kidding me. "You've lived here all this time?" I ask as we pull to the curb.

He shakes his head, "No, after I helped my Mom and Dad get back on their feet, they wanted to repay me and they bought this house. I go to school a few hours away, but when I come visit for the summer, this is where I stay."

We thank the Captain and walk up to the house. It's a two story home with an adjoining two car garage and the landscape seems to be professionally done. Dimitri goes up to the front porch and finds a key under the mat. "Tacky, I know, but my parents brought it over."

He unlocks the door and we enter the living room. It's a tan color with a white fireplace and matching trim. It seems to be very modern, something I wasn't expecting. We walked through the hallway and into the kitchen which matched the same theme as the living room.

"Did you decorate this place on your own?" I ask curiously.

"No, no, no. My mom did it, actually... Come on, I'll show you your room." I follow him up the staircase and down the long hallway. He stops at the second door on the left. He allows me to go first as I enter a faded green room. The furniture is made of cherry wood and there're two large windows behind the bed. "So? Is it to your standards?"

I chuckle, "If you only saw my apartment... This is a huge step up." Dimitri shows me around the rest of the house and even the backyard. It's such a nice house, I couldn't believe that I would be living here for a little while. I knew that eventually I would find my own place again, but I would definitely enjoy this little vacation.

"As bad as I hate to, I really need to go visit my parents. I need to get some of my things and I'd really like my car back."

"We can go if you'd like. Do they still live where they always did?"

I nod, "Yep, same house."

"Good, it'll be a trip down memory lane."

Yeah, memory lane.

After everything that had happened, I couldn't believe how excited I was. I still had a lot to go through before everything was back to normal, but now that Dimitri was back, I felt normal again. I felt like this house would bring us closer together, in more ways than one.

### Chapter Nineteen

I wasn't looking forward to going to my parent's house, but I had no choice. I had to get a few things until I could find a place of my own. I didn't understand why they hadn't told me that they had my things, but Dimitri had me too preoccupied to pay any attention to my prior thoughts.

"And there's where it all started..." He mutters as we pass by our old high school. It doesn't look the way it did when we were in attendance, but it's close. They remodeled it a few years ago to be able to accommodate more students. For years, I've wanted to go back and just walk the halls one last time... Remember all the good things that happened there. And I knew that I would be able to do that again, very soon, as our ten-year high school reunion was only about a year away.

"Ever thought about our reunion?" I ask curiously.

He nods, "I thought about going, I wasn't sure yet but now that you're back, I think we should go... Surprise a few people..."

I smile, "Oh, so I changed your mind, huh?"

"So, you were going to go if we hadn't met again?"

I hesitate, "I might have..."

"Yeah, that's what I thought." It doesn't take much longer before we arrive in my parent's driveway. I waited until Dimitri turned the engine off before I started to open the door. I really, really wanted to just drive away as fast as I could, but I kept telling myself that I needed my things...

As I walked up the drive, I saw my car sitting beside the garage. Man, I missed her. She was the only thing I really ever bought myself while I had been working. I had always wanted a Mustang and after working a few years as a registered nurse, I finally bought myself a black 2010 Mustang GT. She was like the child I had never had. I put a lot of money into her with black rims, tinted windows, and a custom interior. But she was well worth it.

"Dang, girl! Nice car!" Dimitri adds walking around Raven.

I smile as I walk up to the front door, "Yeah, her name's Raven."

He glances around the corner, "You named it?"

"Of course, I did." I hear the doorbell echo through the house. It seemed like forever before my Dad finally opened the door. He stares at me for a moment...

"Uh, we weren't expecting you so soon? I thought you were still in California?"

"No, I wanted to come home. Except when I did, my apartment was sold and my things were gone. The manager told me you have everything."

He nods, "Yeah, I'm sorry we didn't tell you. We were just so shocked by everything..."

"Understandable... So, where is everything?"

"Oh, sorry. It's in the garage, I'll go open the door for you." He disappears into the house as I go back and stand with Dimitri.

"That sounded awkward..." He whispers.

"It was..."

Once the door starts to open, I start rummaging through all the boxes. My dad comes back out and throws me my car keys. That's when he notices Dimitri. He didn't really know what to say to him, actually, he didn't say anything...

I told him that I would come back and get everything else once I found a place to live and he said that was fine. After that, he let me be, and Dimitri and I started piling boxes of clothes and whatnot into my car.

After all was said and done, I had about ten to twelve boxes of clothes, shoes, and jewelry. Technically, most of my clothing consisted of scrubs, but when you work as much as I do, you need options...

Lots of them.

We finally gathered everything I needed and I went back inside to tell my parents that I was leaving. I found my mom in the kitchen. "I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving. I'll be back for everything else once I find a new place to live."

She turns away from the stove and nods toward the window, "So, Dimitri's back, eh? Where'd you find him?" She snarls her nose.

Man, I was hoping no one would say anything. "Uh, he was on the plane..."

She cocks an eyebrow, "Really?"

I nod, "Yes."

"Huh... That couldn't be a coincidence... You forgave him?" I nod once more. "Figures... You were always struck by him." Oh my God, seriously? Do you want to do this now?

I decide to be the bigger person and let it go, "I'll let you know when I find another place to live." And with that, I walk back outside and to my car.

Dimitri watches me curiously. "Fight?"

I shake my head, "No, I'll follow you back." I get in my car and wait for Dimitri to back out of the driveway. Then I follow him out onto the street and back through town. It felt so nice to be able to drive Raven again, I missed her.

Every weekend, when I was feeling lonely, I would take her and drive around all the back roads I could find. Silly, I know, but it helped me collect my thoughts. It was kind of therapeutic for me.

Speaking of therapy, my appointment was scheduled for tomorrow morning at nine. I was so nervous but also excited. I had seen my therapist for seven years, we'd become very good friends and I was kind of excited to tell her about everything. But at the same time, I was afraid of what she might say... About my medication and all. I didn't want to take it anymore, I didn't need it. I was with Dimitri again, it had no purpose. But I was afraid that the only way to rid myself of the hallucinations was to take it again...

When we arrived back at Dimitri's, he parked in his garage and then raised the left door. He motioned for me to pull in. "Well, I'm worthy enough to park in the garage?" I laugh, getting out of the car.

He smiles as he throws me a small plastic button. "Yes and you're worthy enough to have your own remote."

"I'm honored." I joke and attach the remote to the sun visor of my car. Dimitri starts helping me pack all my things upstairs...

"They said something about me, didn't they?" He finally asks as I start hanging up my clothes in the closet.

"It was nothing," I add.

He shakes his head, "It was something or you wouldn't be upset."

"I'm not upset."

He sighs and sits back on the bed, "Carrie, you know it's literally impossible to lie to me... I know you too well."

I shrug, "It's nothing..." I quickly change the subject. "So, when are we going to visit your parents? Soon?" I ask.

"Well, if everything goes well with your appointment, I was hoping we could leave right after that. That is, of course, if that's okay with you?"

"You don't have to ask me, I'd be more than happy to go visit. I always liked her parents. They were always friendly."

"That they are."

Well, at least that was one good thing to look forward to. But I still had to hope and pray that everything went alright with my appointment. I just wanted to move on, go back to the way things used to be...

I wanted my life back.

### Chapter Twenty

The next morning was indeed nerve wrecking. I had my psychiatrist appointment at nine and depending on what she said, determined if I was to go visit Dimitri's parents. And I really, really hoped that she would give me good news, even though I was kind of doubting it...

"Do you want me to go back with you?" Dimitri asks as we sit in the waiting room.

I shake my head, "I'm sure she'll come out and get you later. She's been waiting a long time to meet the famous Dimitri Kozlovski."

He rolls his eyes, "I don't know about famous..."

"Trust me, you are to her."

A few minutes later, my name was called and I followed the nurse back to Doctor Michaels' office. "Carrie! I'm so glad to see you!" She walks around her desk and engulfs me in a hug. "I can't believe this! How'd this happen?" She pulls away and sits down next to me.

"The plane crash or Dimitri?" I ask, unsure of what she was referring to.

Her eyes go wide, "Dimitri? What about Dimitri?"

"Long story... He just so happened to be on the same flight."

After seven years, I had finally been able to surprise her. She was so shocked, she didn't really know what to say, so I continued filling her in. I summed up the entire accident and finally told her the reason Dimitri had left me.

She was so delighted to hear that Dimitri and I had settled our differences and finally made peace with our past. She really wanted to meet him, like I had guessed, but first, she asked me a few things about my medication.

I answered all her questions and to my surprise, she seemed pretty thrilled with my progress. I hadn't had any withdrawal symptoms for about two days now and she said that they would eventually just disappear. I was also very pleased that she agreed with me. I didn't need the medicine. Dimitri was back, there was no point in it anymore.

After that, she asked one of the nurses to go bring Dimitri back and within a few minutes, he came in and shook her hand, "Dimitri Kozlovski, nice to meet you."

She grins, "Nice to meet you! I've been waiting a very long time to meet you. I've heard a lot about you."

He glances at me, "Good things?" He bites his lip.

She nods, "Every time Carrie came to see me, no matter how upset she was, she never left without telling me a story about the two of you. I have to say, you two have quite the story to tell... Well, I guess I'd better let you two go... Carrie, you can come to see me whenever you'd like. Don't be a stranger now."

I smile, "I won't."

"You two have a wonderful day!" We exit the office and head back to the car.

Dimitri speaks up, "Good news, I presume?"

"I'm fine and I don't need to take the medication anymore. I guess you should call your parents and let them know that we're coming."

"Well, why don't we do that right now." He adds as we get into the car. I fasten my seatbelt as Dimitri gets out his phone, presses a button, and puts it on speaker as it starts ringing.

"Hello?" His mother's voice answers.

"Mom?"

"Dimitri, dear? How'd Carrie's visit go?" She asks, sweetly.

"Well, why don't you ask her yourself..." He adds, looking to me.

"Alena? It's Carrie." I respond.

"Oh, goodness, dear! I haven't heard your voice in so long! How'd everything go? Are you able to come visit?"

"Everything went very well, Dimitri and I will be down to visit this evening."

She gasps, "Oh, how wonderful! Isaak!" She yells in a rough Russian accent. I chuckle, remembering his father's name. "Dimitri and Carrie are coming to visit us! Isn't that wonderful?"

"We're going to go home and get our things, then we'll be on, okay?" Dimitri asks.

"Oh yes! You simply must stay a few days! We can cook out and watch family movies! Maybe we can do that computer thing with the rest of the family! What do you call that, son?" She asks.

Dimitri chuckles, "Skype?"

"Yes, yes, that!" I'm sure the rest of the family would love to see you! Oh, I'm so excited! Now, don't be too long!" She adds.

"I won't. We'll be right over. See you soon." He clicks the phone off as I start laughing hysterically. "What's so funny?"

"That computer thing? What do you call that?" I pause to catch my breath. "Skype!" I burst out in laughter once more.

"Yeah, yeah, funny, I know."

When we got back to the house, it didn't take us long to gather our things. We weren't sure how long we were going to stay, but I had a feeling we'd be gone for at least three days. Dimitri had always had a good relationship with his parents, so I knew he would stay as long as he could.

Once we got everything we needed, we headed out and drove about an hour and fifteen minutes away from town. According to Dimitri, Isaak and Alena built their own house a few years after he returned from the army. They purchased about ten acres of land and built their own place from the ground up. I couldn't wait to see it, Alena always had a good sense of decorating and I knew it was likely to be extravagant.

Finally, we reached a private drive and came upon a three-story brick house. It reminded me a lot of Russian architecture, but I expected nothing less. As soon as we parked next to the garage, Alena and Isaak came outside.

"Oh, Carrie! Look at you!" She cries and hugs me tightly. "You are so beautiful!"

I thank her as she pulls away and moves on to Dimitri. "Nice to see you again, Carrie," Isaak adds, shaking my hand.

"Same to you, Isaak."

"Come in, you must be tired," Alena adds as she escorts us to the front porch, leaving Isaak to get our things. As we get closer, the front door swings open. "Brother! Long time no see..." A pale, tall young man steps outside. His hair is long and dark as it lays just below his ears.

"Ivan?" Dimitri asks, eyeing him carefully.

"Surprising, isn't it? Thought I was still in Russia, eh?" He smirks. Russia? I'm so confused... I thought Dimitri was the only child? He didn't have a brother... Did he?

Dimitri looks to Alena, and he doesn't look happy. "I know I should have told you sooner, but he just came back when your plane disappeared and I was so excited to get you both back here, I guess it just slipped my mind..." She explains.

"He's supposed to be shunned..." He whispers.

Shunned? What?

### Chapter Twenty-One

"Carrie, dear, why don't you help me get dinner ready?" Alena asks, lightly pushing me into the house. I follow her into the kitchen as I glance out the window. Isaak is now standing between Dimitri and Ivan.

Alena notices my curiosity, "Don't worry about them. Isaak will handle everything." Everything? What exactly does that mean?

"I never knew Dimitri had a brother..." I mutter as I help her prepare some pasta sauce. Apparently, spaghetti is for dinner.

She nods, "Ivan is the oldest, actually... I'd better let Dimitri explain this to you."

"Oh, please, Alena," I beg. "Just tell me."

She sighs, "Well if I must... Ivan is six years older than Dimitri. I had him not long after Isaak and I got married... He wasn't always the best child, but we loved him just the same... When he was in high school, he started doing things he shouldn't have... He was involved in gangs and sold drugs. He had just begun his senior year of high school when he was arrested. He had been caught and it ruined our family name. Back in Russia, it was pretty normal to hear of shunning and that's exactly what happened to him. If we didn't, we may have never been able to come over to the states..."

Wow.

Not what I was expecting. "So, how is he here, then?"

"He was in jail for quite some time, but eventually got out after we had moved here. Isaak and I have been talking to him for awhile, but we never told Dimitri. They never got along and well, Dimitri really never forgave him for what he did."

No wonder I never heard of him... Alena and I continue to cook dinner as we hear the guys come inside. Dimitri doesn't say a word as Isaak and Ivan carry our things upstairs... Well, this should be interesting...

When we finish, we set the table and Alena calls everyone to eat. Isaak sits at the head of the table with Alena on the right side of him and Ivan beside of her. Dimitri and I sit opposite them. After we all take part in a traditional Russian prayer, we begin to pass the food.

After a few minutes of silence, Alena speaks up, "So, Carrie, what are you up to these days? Did you finish school?"

"Yes, ma'am. I'm a registered nurse at UK hospital. I work in the NICU." I smile as she nods. "How wonderful! You always used to say you always wanted to be a nurse. I'm so proud of you."

You don't know how good it felt to hear her say that. I guess, in a way, I thought of her like my mom. Mine was never there for me, but she always was. "So, what do you do in your spare time?" Isaak asks when no one else speaks up.

"Well, I like to read, cheesy, I know, but I rarely get a day off... I'm a workaholic, I suppose..." He nods and continues eating his food. It stays silent for quite some time before Ivan slams his fist on the table.

"Really, Dimitri? Nothing? You're just going to sit there and pretend I don't exist!"

Isaak stands, "Ivan! I will not have arguing at this dinner table. You want to fight, you can go outside." He adds sternly before sitting down. Okay, not awkward at all...

Ivan turns to me, "So, Carrie... Mom's told me a lot about you. Aren't you a little upset with my brother? I mean, after all, he did kind of leave you in the dust."

I could feel Dimitri tense up beside me. He's so doing this on purpose. "No, I'm not, actually. We've come to terms with that already."

He chuckles, "Of course, the perfect answer. I wonder how he managed to make you a robot..." Robot?

"What the heck does that mean?" I ask.

He realizes he struck a nerve. "Oh, nothing... Just that Dimitri can never be the bad guy. No one ever gets angry with him."

Dimitri stands, "I wasn't the one who ruined father's name, was I? Nope, that was you! I wasn't the one who got myself put in jail either! You did all this to yourself!" Dimitri stomps up the stairs as Alena places her head in her hands.

"Why can't I have one family dinner where my children don't fight... Why is that too much to ask?" She cries.

I felt so sorry for her.

Isaak stands, no doubt to go talk to Dimitri. "No, no, I'll do it." I walk toward the stairwell as I look back at Ivan. "I don't know much about you, but from what I've heard, you're supposed to be the oldest. So, why don't you start acting your age?"

"I do! Dimitri's the one acting childish!"

I laugh, "Oh, really?" I mock him, "Oh, why does Dimitri have to always be the good guy? No one ever gets angry with him!" I pout.

"You don't know anything about us! You're just another one of Dimitri's little lovesick puppy dogs!" Puppy dogs? Really?

I chuckle, "Oh, surely you could have come up with a better comeback than that." I head up the stairs in search of Dimitri. I look down a long hallway, which has at least five doors along each side. Only one of them is shut, I'm guessing that would be our room.

I walk closer and knock, "Dimitri? You in there?"

The door opens as I see him gathering our things. "What are you doing?"

"We're leaving. I will not stay here with him." I shut the door and sit on the bed. "What are you doing? Get your things."

I shake my head, "No. I'm not leaving."

He turns around, shocked by my answer. "What?"

"I am not leaving. I always loved spending time with your mother and I have waited a very long time to get to talk to her again. I will not leave just because you and your brother can't get along."

"Carrie, you don't understand... He's-"

I interrupt him, "Yes, I do. Alena filled me in while you were outside. I know what he did and I don't care. You need to make up with him. If I can forgive you, you can forgive him."

"That was low." He mumbles.

I shrug, "Maybe so, but it got you to listen, didn't it? Think about it, he left you. You left me. Pretty close, isn't it?"

"I had a good reason, he was just being immature."

"Dimitri, you aren't listening! What if I hadn't of forgiven you? What would have happened to us?" He stays silent. "If you don't forgive him, you may miss out on some really good memories to come..."

"How do I know if he's changed?" He whispers.

"How did you know that I hadn't?"

He grins, "How did you get so good at turning everything around on me?"

"I had a lot of therapy sessions, I guess I picked up on a thing or two. Now, what do you say? Are we going to go back down there and finish dinner like civilized people or are we going to act like two-year-olds?"

"What would I do without you?" He asks, opening the door and taking my hand.

"I'd sure hate to find out." When we get back downstairs, everyone's standing around the table. Ivan eyes Dimitri carefully.

"I apologize for my actions. Shall we continue dinner?" Dimitri asks as Alena's eyes light up. She motions for us to sit down.

"I knew you could do it." She whispers to me.

I nodded but I knew it wasn't over yet. Dimitri wasn't the problem here. Ivan was. I wasn't sure if he really wanted to make nice or if he just wanted Dimitri to look like the bad guy in all of this... I guess we'll have to wait and see...

#~#~#~#~#~#

The rest of the evening was fairly quiet. Ivan and Dimitri didn't say a word to one another, although, after dinner, Ivan went up to his room. We didn't see him again until the next morning. Alena and I had fixed breakfast and he came down to eat after we had finished. Of course, Alena had left him a plate and he decided to eat outside on the patio.

"I know this is a lot to ask, but I'm afraid you're my only hope," Alena adds as we finish washing the dishes.

"What is it?"

"I've prayed many years for my children to get along. Ivan can be very stubborn at times, but I think he really misses having his little brother around. And I know Dimitri is upset that Ivan left him when he really needed him. I understand they have issues to work out and I believe you are the only one that can get through to them."

I felt so sorry for her. She was such a good mother and then her children act like this. "I can talk to Dimitri if you'd like, but I don't know Ivan. He probably wouldn't listen to me."

"If you can persuade Dimitri to talk to Ivan, maybe he'll come around on his own. You don't have to, Carrie, I was just asking. Dimitri seems to listen to you a lot more than me and I thought maybe you could get them to reconcile."

I sigh, "I'll talk to Dimitri, but no matter what I say, they have to want to put aside their differences. I can't make them."

She nods, "I understand. Thank you for trying." I smile and leave the room. I go upstairs in search of Dimitri and I find him in our bedroom, talking on the phone. Once he notices me, he hangs up and smirks.

"Guess who just got their internship transferred?"

"Really? You're going to be working with me?"

He nods, "Yep, the same unit too."

"That's wonderful news!" I sit down on the bed as he eyes me carefully.

He sighs and sits down in front of me, "What is it?"

"I was just talking to your mom and she asked me to do her a favor..."

"Oh boy... What do I get a lecture over this time?"

I hesitate, "She wants me to persuade you to talk to Ivan." He shakes his head. "Come on, Dimitri! Please? She really wants you two to get along. You're brothers."

"Carrie, you don't understand."

"Then help me."

He takes a deep breath. "Ivan is six years older than me. When he was arrested, I was twelve. He had been involved in gangs for years before he was caught. When I was little, Ivan and I were best friends. We did everything together, occasionally he got us in trouble, but just for the usual brotherly things like breaking a neighbor's window with a baseball... Stuff like that. He was really the only person I trusted and when he started getting involved with people he shouldn't have, he started ignoring me. We didn't go to the park after school anymore. He didn't want to spend time with me anymore."

"So, you're mad at him because he wasn't there for you?"

"Yes, but it wasn't just that... When he was arrested, everyone talked about us. And in Russian culture, being arrested is almost as bad as murdering someone over here. It's shameful to be related to that person. During that time, my dad was trying to get promoted so we could move over here. His boss wouldn't speak to him, it was disgraceful. So, my parents had no choice, they had to shun him. If they didn't, we'd still be in Russia. My dad would have never gotten the job."

"Then why don't you tell him? He's older now, probably what? In his mid-thirties? Surely he's matured a bit since then."

He shakes his head, "I know him, Carrie, he's the same as he always was."

"Have you talked to him?"

"Well, no..."

"Then what could it hurt? Just talk to him. For me?" I pout.

"You know I would do nearly anything for you... I guess, talking to him couldn't hurt... But can it wait until later today?"

"I suppose..." I kiss him lightly on the lips. "Thank you for listening." I head back downstairs and find Alena bagging up the garbage. "I'll take care of that, Alena. Don't worry about it." I add and take the bag from her. "And by the way, Dimitri agreed to talk to Ivan."

Her eyes light up, "Oh, thank you, dear. You're an angel!"

I head out the back door and take the garbage to the trash can. When I come back up to the porch, I notice Ivan is watching me from the porch swing.

"Can I help you?" I ask, heavy sarcasm in my voice.

"How did you forgive my brother for what he did? I mean, he left you for seven years." He mutters. I was so not expecting that.

"He did, but I wasn't really angry with him... I couldn't be."

"Why? I would be."

"Dimitri was the only guy that ever treated me like a real person. I loved him, I guess love is stronger than hatred."

He rolls his eyes, "Another classic answer."

I take a calming breath and sit in the rocking chair in front of him. "Ivan, what's the real reason you're upset with your brother?"

"Everybody bows at his feet. He can never do any wrong."

"I don't believe that. Everyone makes mistakes, even Dimitri. What exactly did Alena tell you about us?"

He shrugs, "Just that you were high school sweethearts and when you got into college, Dimitri left you for the army. Then you met again when your plane crashed."

I nod, "That's what I thought... Dimitri left me because your dad lost his job. He went into the army to help them get back on their feet. He had his paycheck sent directly to them. When he came back, your dad found a new job and helped put Dimitri through the rest of his schooling. When Dimitri told me this, I was a little upset. I couldn't figure out why he didn't come back for me, but I realized it wasn't because he didn't want to, it was because he was afraid. He was afraid that I had moved on and he didn't want to complicate things."

"Mom told me that he had a girlfriend and he was going on vacation with her when the plane crashed. What happened to her?"

"She died from the impact. We tried to save her, but it was too late."

He cocks an eyebrow, "I bet that made you happy."

I shake my head, "God no. I'm a nurse, Ivan. Death does not make me happy. And he really loved her... I think you have the wrong idea about Dimitri. He hasn't had a perfect life. When you went to jail, he lost his brother. The same brother that taught him the little things like throwing a baseball... You were his best friend, Ivan, and you left him. When he moved here, he was in a foreign place without you... He lost you, he lost me, and he lost his girlfriend. If you think Dimitri had the life that you should have had, you're wrong. It's been tough, but I think it's made him a better person. I know it's made me stronger. I fought more battles on that island than I had in my entire life. But Dimitri was right there with me. That's all he wanted from you. He just wanted you to be the big brother."

I definitely felt like a therapist, but I knew I had to tell him our story. I hoped that it would help him, maybe he could finally understand Dimitri's perspective...

### Chapter Twenty-Two

After talking to Ivan, I spent some time with Alena and we had the chance to catch up with one another. Isaak even joined in on the conversation a time or two, it kind of surprised me since he was usually pretty quiet.

By the time lunch came around, Dimitri decided to talk to Ivan. They were outside and we all wanted to hear what they said. Finally, Alena suggested we gather around the kitchen window. It was cracked just enough for us to hear what they were saying, but not enough for them to be able to notice it was open...

"Had a talk with your girlfriend, huh?" Ivan asks as Dimitri sits beside him.

"I'm not here because of her. I'm here because I'm tired of carrying your guilt around with me." That gets Ivan's attention. "We're adults now, brother. Why don't we act like it?"

"My guilt, huh? Really? You have no idea what it was like back there, man... Everyone ignored me. My friends had nothing to do with me and then I find out that you all were gone. You left me, Dimitri. Not the other way around."

"You knew dad was trying to get a promotion to move here. You always knew that, yet you went out and got involved with the wrong people. You know the way people talk, if we didn't shun you, we'd still be there. We didn't want to, but we had to. You had made your own decisions... This can go either way. We did leave you, but you left us first."

"I know all that, Dimitri, I just wish I could take it all back."

"The past is the past but my question is, can we all move on? Mom really wants us to get along. If not for us, for her?"

Ivan nods, "Yeah." They stand as Alena hugs me.

"They really did it!" She whispers. "Thank you, Carrie. I'll forever be grateful."

Ivan and Dimitri shake hands and smile as Ivan adds, "You know, that girl of yours, she's something else..."

"I know, trust me." They start to walk back inside as we all panic to look normal. Alena started making sandwiches and I helped as Isaak sat at the bar. When they come in, Isaak looks to them, "So?"

"We're fine," Ivan adds.

"Good."

Afterward, it was a lovely day. Dimitri and Ivan were really getting along. There were no arguments or anything. Just normal family talk. I could tell everyone felt so much better, the air was clear now. Finally, we could just be ourselves...

Once dinner was over, everyone went outside and roasted marshmallows. I went back into the house to get the graham crackers and when I came back out, I heard Dimitri and Alena talking behind the house. I slowed down and eavesdropped a bit...

"So, enlighten me, dear. When will I be getting my first daughter-in-law?" A grin crosses my face as await his answer.

"Mom, I don't know... We just got back together, I mean, we haven't even gone on a date yet. We're just trying to get back to our lives."

She sighs in frustration, "Son, you've known her a very long time. She waited for you and you waited for her... I know you were going to propose to Rebecca but we both know you would have never gone through with it. A mother knows, Dimitri... I know she's the one, now why don't you?" Dang.

"I know she is too, but that doesn't mean I'm going to ask her to marry me right away. I don't want to scare her off."

She chuckles, "Honey, I don't think you could scare her off if you wanted to. She's just as stubborn as you are. Besides, she's living with you, right?"

"Well yeah, but that's only because she doesn't have anywhere else to go."

"Yeah and you got your internship moved to her unit..."

"What's the big deal? So, I want to spend time with her, why is that so bad?"

"It isn't, dear. Just think about it, okay? You aren't getting any younger." I hear them walk toward me. I grasp the door and close it, fairly hard, so they can hear me. Yeah, sneaky I know.

"Ah, just what we needed," Alena says, smiling at me. She takes the crackers from me and heads back to the fire. I look back to Dimitri as he takes my hand.

"What were y'all doing back there?" I ask.

He shakes his head, "Just another one of my mother's lectures."

"What was it this time? You and your brother fighting again?" I ask, curiously.

"No, it's nothing. Don't worry about it." Darn! I really wanted him to bring it up...

It probably sounds crazy, but honestly, if Dimitri asked me right now to marry him, I'd say yes. I mean, I've been waiting a long time... And I don't want to wait forever, I mean, I'm getting older too. I still want kids and all, but I'm not sure what he thinks.

Scare me off?

Impossible.

I love him too much to repeat the past again.

#~#~#~#~#~#

The next morning, when I woke up, Dimitri wasn't with me. I frowned and got ready by myself. Then I went downstairs and found the rest of the family eating breakfast. "Anyone know where Dimitri is?" I ask as Alena speaks up.

"He came downstairs earlier and ate breakfast then he went outside. I haven't seen him since... Why don't you eat with us, dear?"

I hesitate, "I'll go check on him. I'll be right back." She nods as I head outside and look around the yard. He's nowhere in sight.

I was a little worried; it wasn't like Dimitri to run off without telling anyone where he was going... I saw the car in the drive, so he had to be around here somewhere. I walk around the back of the house and see him pacing around the large oak tree. He's on the phone and when he sees me, he quickly ends the call.

"Sorry, I didn't wake you. You were sleeping so peacefully, I just couldn't bring myself to interrupt." He explains. His right eye twitches, he's lying.

"So, who were you talking to?"

"Oh, no one... I was thinking, maybe we should head home today. I believe you need to show me around the hospital." He smiles.

"Yeah... Whatever you say." I turn my back to him and head back into the house. He knows I'm suspicious... Now, to figure out what he's up to...

I finish my breakfast at the bar while Alena washes the dishes. "I know what I should get you for mother's day this year." I laugh.

She turns to me, "Mother's day? What?"

"A dishwasher!"

She smiles, "No, no. Not necessary, dear. I do wash them a lot but I enjoy the silence. It gives me time to think." Only Alena would say that. " Dimitri tells me that you all will be leaving shortly?"

I nod, "Apparently."

"I take it you don't want to go?"

"I do enjoy visiting you, but I know I need to get back to my job too."

"Aw, yes. You were meant to be a nurse, dear. I would have never thought you'd be anything different... But do promise me one thing, will you? You know how stubborn Dimitri can be. Keep him in line, for me?"

I chuckle, "You know I will, Alena."

By midmorning, Dimitri had gathered our things and put them in the car. I hated to leave, I really did, but I needed to get back to my job. After all, I kind of needed to find a place to live... When we were ready to go, we all said our goodbyes and Alena promised me we would talk multiple times a week as she thought of me as her daughter. She always made me smile and I wished she lived closer to us.

Finally, we were back on the road and I stayed silent all the way to the interstate. "Cat got your tongue?" Dimitri asks, pulling onto the interstate.

"Nope."

He glances at me, "What'd I do this time?"

"What? I'm not allowed to be quiet?"

He shakes his head, "No, you like to talk. Now, what is it?"

He was falling for it. I really wanted to know who he was talking to this morning and I wanted him to bring up what Alena had talked to him about last night. "Don't think I'm some kind of control freak or anything, I'm just curious... What was your phone call about this morning? I mean, you hung up as soon as you saw me and you've acted a little odd ever since..."

He sighs, "I was talking to Rebecca's parents. They wanted to know how she died and I told them... They said they'd rather hear it from me than anyone else..."

Not what I was expecting. "Oh, sorry for asking."

I sit back as far as I can and look out the window, "No, that isn't what's bothering you... It's something else... Spill it." He demands.

I shake my head, "No, that's all."

Silence. Again.

It wasn't really awkward or anything, just eerie. And when his cell phone rung, we both nearly jumped out of our seat. When he looked at the number, he answered it immediately. "Hello, Laura." Laura? Who's that? "Of course, I'll be there... I'm driving home now, I'll be up there soon... See you later." He places the phone in the cup holder and grips the steering wheel.

"When we get home, I'll drop you off and change clothes, then I have to go. Rebecca's mom is going to have a remembrance ceremony this afternoon. You'll have to show me around the hospital later."

I nod, "That's fine, how far away is it? Will we be back by this evening?"

He glances at me, "Carrie, I'm going alone."

I look at him in surprise. Alone? "Oh."

"They don't know you, Carrie. What would it look like if I showed up with you?" I knew what he meant, but the way he said it made my skin crawl. "I mean, I can't show up with another woman..."

"I know... I know..."

It seemed like it took forever to get home. I was so ready to get out of that car, I was out before he ever fully stopped. He popped the trunk and I gathered my luggage. He went to unlock the door as I strolled past him and up to my room. I put all my things away and then called my boss. I asked her if I could come into work now and of course, she said yes. She said everyone had really missed me and they would be so excited to hear I was coming back so soon.

So, I put on my scrubs and grabbed my stethoscope as I went back downstairs. Dimitri was standing in the foyer, fixing his tie in the mirror. I have to say he looked pretty sexy in a suit.

I reached for my car keys and walked toward the garage. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to work, what does it look like?"

He sighs, "Carrie, I don't have time for this."

I turn to him, "Time for what? I'm going to work this evening. What's the big deal? I'd rather be there than here by myself. Besides, you can stop by later, if you'd like a tour."

He glares at me, "If you want to go so bad, just go get ready. I'll just tell them you were on the plane and tried to save her. Now, hurry up."

I really wasn't upset with him. I wanted to go back to work, I was excited to get back. But this, this struck a nerve. "I'm not going, Dimitri. I'm going to work like I said."

He shakes his head, "I don't understand you, sometimes. Make up your mind please." He is so snarky today... Gez.

It took all I had to keep my cool. "Dimitri, I made up my mind when you got off the phone. I'm going to work. I'll see you later." I give him a quick kiss and run off to my car. I was long gone before he even got outside.

I know this is hard for him... With Rebecca and all, but he doesn't need to take it out on me. I'm beginning to wonder if living with him right now is a good thing...

Maybe I should start looking for an apartment ASAP.

### Chapter Twenty-Three

It was so nice to finally be able to get back to work. I didn't realize how much I had missed it. As soon as I walked in, the other nurses welcomed me with open arms. They were so happy to see me and I was even more ecstatic to see them. I had been the head nurse for multiple years and even though some days I felt like I could pull my hair out, I was still glad to be back.

What made it all worth it was there were three women who had just been induced. Their labor was moving quickly now and I decided to assign them to myself once first shift left. They were very friendly and they seemed to enjoy my tips on a quick and easy labor and delivery.

I had just gotten back from my supper break and checked on the ladies when my radio went off. "Carrie to the front desk. You have a visitor." I knew it had to be Dimitri, but I didn't want to leave. One of my patients was ready to push and she insisted that I stay with her. So, when I went to get her Doctor, I quickly stopped by the front desk.

Dimitri stood there in his casual attire. "I'm really busy right now, but Brooke can call the Doctor you're interning and they can show you around. Right, Brooke?" I ask, looking at the secretary.

"Of course." She smiles.

"I've got to go but I'll catch up as soon as I can." I run back to the room and assist the Doctor. Within about half an hour, a beautiful seven pound, eight-ounce girl is born. As for my other two patients, they delivered that same night, only a few hours apart. I have to say, the world was graced with three beautiful baby girls in that short time.

"I'm going to clock out for the night, Brooke. Any idea where Dimitri is?"

"He was in Doctor Blum's office."

"Thanks!" I clock out and head upstairs to where all the offices are. Only one of them has their lights on. I walk up and knock on the door. Doctor Blum answers. "Good evening, Carrie. We were just about to go see how you were doing. I've shown Dimitri around and we even got to discuss some of his past experiences. I think he'll be a wonderful Doctor and I can't wait for him to start his internship with me tomorrow." He smiles.

"Wonderful, so are we ready to go?" Dimitri nods and walks toward me.

"So how's everything downstairs?" Doctor Blum asks as we start to leave the office.

"Fantastic, we have three new mother's and three baby girls."

"Well, it's a girl's night, alright. See y'all tomorrow." We get into the elevator and head down to the basement floor.

"So, that's what you were talking about when you said busy?" Dimitri asks.

I nod, "Yep, all three of them were in labor... Meet you at home."

I get in my car and head back to the house. Dimitri follows me all the way back. Once I'm in the garage, I lock the car and head inside, with Dimitri right behind me. "Are you working tomorrow?" He asks.

"Yeah, why?"

"Maybe we can go in together." He suggests. I know he's trying to make up for this morning, but there's not really anything to make up for.

"Sure." After getting to my room, I take a quick shower and change into my pajamas. I go back into the bathroom and search for a brush. I pull on the bottom right drawer and find makeup and hair supplies.

This isn't mine.

"Rebecca must have left that the last time she was here..." Dimitri adds, walking over to the drawer. You've got to be kidding me. I stand and something shiny catches my eye. There's a gold chain peeking out from the bed. I walk over and pull it out.

It's a locket.

There're initials carved on the top, _D &R_. I push on the latch and it opens, revealing a picture of Dimitri and Rebecca.

"She'd been looking for that for months... We could never find it." He adds, taking the locket from me. I take a deep breath, trying to gather my thoughts.

"I can't stay in here," I mutter as Dimitri looks up at me.

"I can move it, Carrie. It's not a big deal."

I shake my head, "It's not that... I can't replace her. This was her room. Not mine." I leave the room and head downstairs.

"You're not replacing her, you were here before her!"

I go back out into the garage and get in my car. Looks like I'll be sleeping in here tonight. "Carrie, come on. If you don't want to sleep up there, sleep in my room."

"No. I'll sleep here."

I try to ignore him as he opens my door and tries to reason with him... That is until I heard my name. "Carrie..." It whispered. I looked to my passenger seat.

Sarah.

"He's still grieving, dear. This is just as hard for him as it is for you... He wanted you to go with him today, but he didn't want to upset Rebecca's parents. He's trying, dear." She adds.

"Carrie, what are you looking at?" Dimitri asks.

"Carrie! You know he doesn't love you!" Fear rises in my chest as I look to the hood of my car. Rebecca sits there, blood staining her clothes. "It'll always be me, Carrie. I was there when you weren't! Dimitri could never love you! You're just a crazy, mental lunatic!"

"Carrie?" Dimitri asks again.

"Carrie, don't listen to her! She's just trying to make this worse!" Sarah adds as she begins to fade. "Carrie, block her out!"

"You killed me, Carrie. You did it." Rebecca responds.

"It's happening again, isn't it?" Dimitri asks.

I pull my head into my hands, "Too. Many. People. Talking!"

Dimitri puts a hand on my back, "Who's talking?"

"You... Sarah... Rebecca."

His breath catches when I say her name. "They're not there... Come on," He pulls me out of the car and before I can say anything, he scoops me up into his arms. He carried me all the way upstairs to his room and put me in his bed. I pulled a pillow over my face and tried to block out all their voices.

"Yeah, he used to do this to me when I was upset. Knight in shining armor, huh." Rebecca says, laughing.

"Stop!" I cry as I feel Dimitri pull me closer to him.

"No one's here, Carrie. Just me."

Why does this always happen to me?

Why can't I just be left alone?

#~#~#~#~#~#

When I awoke the next morning, I felt surprisingly uncomfortable. I was facing away from Dimitri with his arms draped across my stomach. Normally, I wouldn't mind, but today, I wasn't feeling it. All the memories of yesterday came flooding back and I knew that staying here wasn't an option. I had to move.

Rebecca was just too much for me, whether I wanted to admit or not. I couldn't handle it. When she died, Dimitri didn't get the grieving time he needed and I feel like we rushed into things too quickly. I was excited to get him back, but not this way. I didn't want to be his rebound girl...

I picked his arm up as carefully as possible and laid it back on the pillow once I had moved. I slipped away and reluctantly, went back to the other bedroom to get ready for work. Dimitri had said yesterday that we should go in together, but I decided to go in early. I knew his alarm would be waking him up soon, so I made no effort to get him up now. Instead, I left him a note, telling him where I'd be.

Once I was at the hospital, I decided to eat breakfast in the cafeteria. Thankfully, the food here didn't taste like hospital food. It tasted more like home than anything else... When I sat down with my plate, Brooke joined me.

"Good morning, Carrie. How are you today?" She asks, smiling ear to ear.

"Okay, I suppose... You?"

"Fine. Is something bothering you?" She asks, curiously.

I shake my head, "No, not really. Just a little stressed, is all... You wouldn't happen to know any apartments for rent, would you?"

She nods, "Actually, I do. My mom owns a complex a few blocks away. She told me just last night that she was looking for a new tenant. You interested?"

"Of course. Do you know anything about it?"

"Well, I'm guessing it's like all the rest that she owns... Two bedrooms, one bath. I believe it has a dining room off the kitchen as well."

"Sounds lovely, when do you think I can take a look?"

"I'll call her now."

Man, that was easier than I thought. I figured I would have to look for at least a few weeks before I found anything I was interested in. But I guess this was the advantage to having a few friends.

Brooke called her mother and she said that I could swing by after work if I'd like. So, that was the plan. I was really hoping it would work out and Brooke said she would come along if I wanted her to.

After we ate, we headed upstairs and clocked in for work. She took her spot at the front desk as I grabbed my stethoscope, thermometer, gloves, and radio. I threw the stethoscope around my neck and shoved everything else in my pockets.

I had just started completing my rounds when I heard Dimitri walk up with Doctor Blum. "Good morning, Doctor Blum," I add, walking past him.

"Good morning, Carrie. I was hoping you would assist me today. My nurse called in sick and well, you know I'm a bit picky."

Oh, joy. I get to work with Dimitri. "Of course." I let Brooke know my change of schedule, then I start following him around. We enter room 347. I immediately remember the number from last night. The woman's name was Jane, she was expecting a baby boy and her labor was progressing fairly slow.

"How are we feeling today, Jane?" I ask as we all gather in the room.

"Tired. Very tired. Is there anything we can do?"

Doctor Blum responds, "Well, let me check everything and we'll see what's best, alright?" I check all her vitals as he checks her cervix. Dimitri watches the baby's monitor. "You're still six centimeters... I believe it would be best to start some Pitocin and get those contractions going. Carrie, will you check on the baby for me, dear?" I roll the ultrasound machine over and rub the cold gel over her stomach.

The results were not what we had expected. "He's breech."

She watches me carefully, "What's that mean?"

"You're baby has turned around. He should be facing down, but instead, he's facing up..." I look at Dr. Blum to see what he thinks.

"Let me discuss this with you outside, Dimitri." They leave the room as Jane starts to get nervous.

"Will he be okay?" She asks.

"I'm sure everything's fine. We'll figure out the best way to do this, okay?" I walk outside and join the conversation.

"I think we should manually turn the baby," Dimitri adds.

Before Dr. Blum gets to answer, I respond, "No, too risky. She's too far along now, a C-section is best for the situation."

"We try to avoid those whenever possible and I think we should try to turn the baby first. Then, if that doesn't work, we can do the C-section."

I look to Dr. Blum, "What do you think?"

"I'm sorry, Dimitri, but I have to agree with Carrie. Considering all her past medical conditions, I think we should go ahead and schedule the C-section." Ha! I won! I know what I'm talking about. I've worked here for years.

Dimitri did not seem happy, but he'll get over it. We went back inside and explained to Jane what we had decided. She agreed and was scheduled for surgery as soon as possible.

Luckily, she had surgery before my shift was up and I was able to be there when little James was born. He was the cutest baby I think I had ever seen and that was saying a lot considering the babies I had delivered over the past years.

He was healthy and so was Jane. She got to hold him after I checked him out and I even took a few pictures for her. This was why I loved my job, I got to watch a new life be born every time I came to work.

It was truly a miracle.

After I clocked out, I met Brooke upfront. "You ready to go?" She asks.

"Go where?" Dimitri asks, coming up behind us in his civilian clothes.

"Brooke's mom owns an apartment complex a few blocks away and she has one available for rent. So, I'm going to check it out."

He frowns. "I thought you were staying with me..."

"I think it's best if I find a place of my own," I smile and look back to Brooke. "Let's go." Dimitri followed us downstairs and once Brooke got in her car, he finally spoke up.

"Why are you doing this? We agreed you'd stay with me."

"No, we agreed that I would stay with you until I found a place of my own."

He sighs, "Look, if your room isn't to your liking, we can remodel it. I don't mind." He pauses. "It means nothing to me... I just wish you'd stay."

"I'm just going to look at the apartment, okay? It doesn't necessarily mean I'm going to take it..." I felt so bad. He was making me feel guilty.

"That's the thing, I don't want you to look. I want you to stay with me. It worked when we were in college. Why not now?"

I needed to go or I was going to be late. "Dimitri, you're heartbroken. I can see that, everyone can. Just grieve, okay? Then maybe we'll talk?"

He shakes his head, "Talk? What does that mean?"

"I'll see ya later."

Now, I felt even worse. He had left me the first time, but now, I felt like I was leaving him. I knew I was doing the right thing. He needed time. Time to heal. Time to think. Me being there was only distracting him from doing what he needed to do

### Chapter Twenty-Four

Brooke was right; the apartment was perfect! It was actually bigger than the one I had previously and the rent was the same. I had an extra bedroom and the bathroom had a Jacuzzi tub! The master bedroom had a huge walk in closet and I even had a formal dining room! What more could a girl want?

And on top of all that, Brooke's mom, Pam, was just as sweet as she could be. She had that certain southern hospitality that really made me feel at home. The decision process was easy. I knew no matter where I looked, it couldn't get any better than this. I was still close to the hospital and I had all these extra perks that I didn't have before.

I actually signed the papers that night and thankfully, the apartment still had running water and electricity. The previous tenants had just moved out and Pam hadn't even had time to have it turned off. So, all I had to do was have it transferred into my name. I could move in the next day if I pleased and that was just what I intended to do.

Once I started back to Dimitri's, my nerves were starting to get to me. I was so excited to get back to my life... To live on my own again, but I didn't want to leave Dimitri. I knew I was doing the right thing, but I couldn't help but feel this way.

He was grieving.

I should be there for him, but was living with him really the answer?

No... I knew that, but he didn't understand.

I pulled into the garage for the last time. Before I even got out of the car, Dimitri was at the door. I hesitated for a minute. I needed to get myself together before I confronted him. I had to make the part of me that felt guilty understand.

It was silly really.

I mean, I was trying to convince myself of my own decision. I guess the part of me that remembered how heartbroken I was when he left me, felt his pain now. I had no one to comfort me, but he still had me. Just because I'm not his girlfriend, doesn't mean I can't be his friend.

I gathered up enough courage and exited the car. "It took you an awfully long time just to check out an apartment." He adds as I walk into the house.

"Yeah, sorry... I was so excited about it, I guess I lost track of time..." I pause. "I wish you could see it, though. It's so nice, so much better than the last one. It had an extra bedroom and a formal dining room! And even a walk in closet!"

He smiles, "Sounds great... But I have all that here..."

I start to walk up the stairs, but stop when he finishes. "I need my own place, Dimitri. I'm grateful for all that you've offered, but I kind of miss it... I also already signed the papers... I can move in tomorrow."

He grimaces. "Already? We didn't even talk about this?"

"There's nothing to talk about," I mutter.

"Yes, there is. I don't need to grieve, Carrie. Rebecca's dead. There's nothing I can do... That part of my life is over. I mean, the only reason I fell in love with her is because she reminded me of you."

I shake my head, "Can you even hear yourself? You just said it. You fell in love with her... I sure hope if I died, you'd grieve over me." I turn around and continue up the stairs to my room, er, I mean her room...

"Carrie, come on! You know that's different."

"No, it isn't. She was a human being too."

He shakes his head in frustration, "What is this? Payback? I left you so now you're going to leave me, huh? That's low."

A part of me wants to yell back, but I know better. "If you think that's what it is, then you don't know me at all. And for your information, I'd never do that. No human should ever feel that kind of pain. But I'm not leaving you. Yes, I'm moving a few miles down the road, but I'm not leaving. I'm still your friend."

He pauses, "I lied to you."

I cock an eyebrow, "What?"

"When we were at my mom's... You asked me the night before we left what she was lecturing me about... I told you it was nothing, but truthfully, she asked when she was getting her daughter-in-law. She kept telling me I wasn't getting any younger and I told her that I didn't want to scare you away as soon as I got you back."

Oh, now it comes out, huh. "You can't scare me away," I smile.

"So, you're saying that if I had asked you to marry me, you would have said yes?"

"Well, probably... Is that crazy?"

He takes a deep breath, "Then marry me."

Whoa... Not what I was expecting... "I-I-"

"Well? If that's what it takes to get you to stay, then so be it. We both know it's going to happen sooner or later anyway."

I was completely shocked. "No... If you just want to marry me just to keep me here, then no. I can't even believe you would even say that to me." I had contained my anger long enough. That threw me over the edge. I immediately started gathering my things.

"No, listen, I didn't mean it that way... I love you, I just-"

"No, you listen. We've been together a long time, if you think I'll settle for that, you've got it all wrong. I want what everyone else we went to school with had. Have you kept up with any of them? Facebook? Anything?" He shakes his head. "They had romantic proposals and fairytale weddings and now they have a ton of kids. I want that too. But we can't move on until you do. And maybe by then, the proposal will seem meaningful and not just something to get your way with."

I left him speechless, but I guess that was a good thing. Maybe he'll think about what I said. I still couldn't believe he said that to me. It was like he just wanted to get it over with. I swear it seemed like my Dimitri wasn't even there anymore.

It was like someone else had taken over.

### Chapter Twenty-Five

The next morning, I was up at the crack of dawn. Of course, technically, I had been up all night. After my argument last night with Dimitri, I came back to my apartment and slept on the floor. And let me tell you, this is a lovely apartment, but that doesn't make the floor any more comfortable.

As soon as I got ready, I contacted a moving company to help me get all my things from my parent's garage. To my surprise, they weren't busy and came on down... Speaking of my parents, they were quite surprised that I had already found a place to live but they didn't bother to help with anything. They stayed inside the entire time I was there. I didn't even bother to tell them I was leaving, they'd figure it out.

The boys from the moving company were very friendly and they were pretty fast paced. They never wasted a second of their time. As soon as we got back to my place, they had everything carried in within the hour. They were a big help, now I just have to go through all these boxes.

Thankfully, there was one thing I liked about my mother; She was organized. Thank God. Each box was labeled and therefore, made it so much easier to find things. I started with the kitchen and worked my back to the bedroom. Of course, I didn't get everything put away, just the things I used on a day to day basis and some décor to make the place feel a little more like home.

By the evening, I had unpacked everything I needed and all my other stuff was stashed in an extra closet until I had time to go through it. I had just sat down with a fresh, hot cup of coffee when my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller ID. Brooke.

"Hey, girlie," I answer.

"Carrie, I was just calling to ask... Are you and Doctor Kozlovski on speaking terms?"

Well, that's a weird question... "Uh, I guess... Why?"

"Well, don't be mad... He kind of gave me like twenty bucks to tell him where your new apartment was... I wouldn't have given it to him if he was a creep or anything, but he seemed like he really needed to talk to you."

Great. "No, that's fine. I just wonder why he didn't call."

"That's what I said and he said he needed to talk to you face to face."

"Alright, Brooke. Thanks for letting me know." I hang up and slide the phone back into my pocket. If he just left the hospital, it shouldn't take him long to get here and I didn't want to just be sitting on the couch when he did. I needed to look busy so maybe he'd leave...

Reluctantly, I got up and shuffled back to the closet. I pulled out a couple boxes and started going through them. It was only a few minutes before my doorbell rang. I looked out the window and saw Dimitri standing in his scrubs. I had to take in the view for a minute before unlocking the door.

"I was expecting you," I add and walk back to the boxes.

"Brooke?" He asks, stepping inside and closing the door behind him.

I nod, "You know, you didn't have to buy her off. All you had to do was call or text me. I would have told you."

He cocks an eyebrow, "Oh, really?"

"More than likely."

He looks around, "Nice place you got here."

"Oh, does the Doctor approve? I'm shocked."

"Sarcasm much?" I shrug. "Look, I'm sorry for what I said last night. I shouldn't have even mentioned it, but I really didn't want you to leave, you've got to understand. I'd do anything to get you to stay."

I smile, "Does that include getting up early and making me breakfast every morning? Or going to see your parents every other weekend? Maybe have a movie night every Friday? And a foot rub every evening after work?"

"Absolutely." He adds.

"Dimitri, I was joking."

He nods, "I know, but I'd still do it... Why are you so stubborn?"

"I told you, I like having my own place. Besides, you still need time to yourself. We'll see each other at work."

He shakes his head, "What about our first date? As I do recall, we said once we got back home and settled down, we'd try to go back to the way we used to be."

"I think we should wait a little while. You know, get back into our routine."

"Why?"

And he says I'm stubborn, really? "Dimitri, do you even remember the way we were? In high school? College?"

"Of course, I do, don't you?"

"Yes, but we're not like that anymore. We'll never be. We've both changed, even if we don't see it right now... Like me, I'm crazy."

He chuckles, "You're not crazy."

"Yes, I am. I don't even feel like myself. I was on that medication for so long, I forgot what it felt like to feel emotions. That's going to take some getting used to... My point is, we should wait a little while and see what happens. Maybe the time apart will do us some good. And who knows, if we do get back together, maybe we'll be better than we were before."

"If?"

"It was for the sake of my argument, okay? So, do we agree?"

He hesitates, "I don't want to, but it doesn't matter what I say. If you want time apart then so be it." Hmm, easier than I thought.

"Good, I'll see you at work." I open the front door for him.

He chuckles, "Are you kicking me out?"

"Yes, I'm busy as you can see."

"Wait a minute, did you not say last night, that we were still friends?"

"Yeah, why?"

" _Friends_ don't kick _friends_ out."

I crack a smile, "They do today. See you at work." He starts to leave but stops and turns around. He leans in and starts to kiss me goodbye but I pull away. "Uh-huh, friends don't kiss friends."

He glares, "Sometimes they do."

"Nope, not in this case."

"Not even goodbye?" He whines.

"No. Now, go!" I give him a slight push out the door.

He looks back, "I'll get you back for this, Carrie! Just wait and see."

I laugh, "Looking forward to it!"

God, please let this work.

Please.

#~#~#~#~#~#~#

Letting him go was hard. I really wanted our relationship to move forward but that was nearly impossible in the state he was in right now. I didn't really know what to do with myself after he left. Over the past couple weeks, I had really gotten used to his company and now, with him gone, I felt like I did before the accident.

Alone.

I hated that feeling. After seven years, it disgusted me. But I knew that if this worked out, our relationship could be ten times better than it was and I hoped it would be. The time apart could do us a lot of good even though it seemed so hard right now.

Over the next week, I realized just how much I loved being around him. I was excited to get to work because I knew he'd be there. Honestly, I felt like a teenager again. Everything he'd say to me, I'd remember and play it back in my head at night before I went to sleep. It was these moments that I had really missed.

"Hey, Carrie, wait up!" His voice always made me stop dead in my tracks. "I was hoping you'd come somewhere with me after work."

I cock an eyebrow, "Somewhere?"

"If I tell you, it'll ruin the surprise."

"Surprise? Dimitri, are trying to propose again?" I joke.

He smirks, "No, just trust me, okay?"

"Fine. Where should I meet you?"

"I'll text you the address. See you later." Somewhere, huh? That made me curious and excited. Any extra time I got to spend with him always made my heart flutter even though I was the one to think of this grand idea to be apart.

It wasn't long until our shift was over and as he said, he sent me the address. I recognized the street name immediately. It was just across the road from my apartment. It was a subdivision, a really nice subdivision...

Wonder why we're meeting there?

I put all my questions aside and left the hospital. By the time I arrived in the neighborhood, Dimitri was already standing in front of this huge, gray stone, two story house. It was absolutely gorgeous!

When I got out of the car, he opened the front door and turned back to me, "Coming?" I was a little confused until I noticed the for sale sign in the front yard... He was thinking about buying this place.

"Why did you bring me here?" I ask, walking up to him.

"Let's just say I was thinking about purchasing a new home and I needed a good friend of mine's opinion... Come on." I follow him inside and as soon as we enter the foyer, I start smiling. I couldn't help it. This house was absolutely beautiful! The living room and kitchen were both various shades of brown and the floor plan was unbelievable. Everything was so open but yet you still had some sense of privacy.

He showed each room one by one. First was the dining room and office then the master and guest bedrooms. I have to say, the master was definitely better than the one he had now. It had French doors that open up to a private patio and a stone fireplace in the corner of the room. And the master bathroom was to die for! It had the same rustic feel as the bedroom but also a romantic sense.

The next room was the guest room. It was painted a light gray color with specks of mint green here and there. Of course, it wasn't as big as the master, but it still beat the other house...

The last room we came to was a nursery. It was white and the palest of pink, it really got me thinking about my future and let me tell you if I could have called the whole, 'Let's be friends' thing off, I would have. Right then, no doubt.

"So, what do you think?" Dimitri asks as we walk back into the living room.

"Very nice," I smile.

He hesitates, almost as if I'm supposed to say something else. "Very nice? That's it? There's nothing else you want to say?"

"Should I? I mean, you're buying it... Do you like it?"

"Well, yeah, but do you?"

"Who wouldn't like this place?"

He smirks, "True... But let's just say you were buying it. Would you enjoy living here? Or would you keep looking somewhere else?"

"I already told you, I like it. Besides, what does it matter? And why do you want to move so badly?"

"We both know this whole friend thing isn't going to last much longer. It's driving me crazy and I can tell it's doing the same to you... I don't want to live in that house anymore, it isn't ours. Which is why I sold it to Ivan."

Okay, that last part kind of shocked me. "Ivan? Really?"

He nods, "Yep, he was approved at the bank the day before yesterday. He can move in as soon as I find somewhere else to live... So, the house gets a thumbs up from you?"

"Definitely."

"Good, because I actually already put an offer in... And my agent called me at lunch today. It's officially ours."

"You mean yours and if you already bought it, why did you want my opinion?"

"I loved it, I knew you would too. I brought you here because I want you to know that I really am serious about our relationship. I'm ready when you are and I don't mean to rush you or anything like that, I just want to drop the whole friend thing. It really is driving me crazy."

I mean really, what was I thinking? I'm surprised it even lasted a week. "Alright, so when's our first date?"

He smiles, "Well, I was talking to Doctor Blum and turns out he has a beach house in the Carolina's and he offered to let us have it for a couple days this weekend..." He trails off dramatically.

"Don't you think a beach house is a little much for a first date?"

He shakes his head, "Not in my book, it isn't. So, what do you say?"

How could I ever say no to a beach house? "Did you really think I'd turn you down?"

"I never know about you..."

I smirk, "I've got to be getting home. Apparently, I have some packing to do." I move closer to kiss him goodbye but he turns away.

"Uh-uh... Remember what you did to me last week? I told you I'd get you back."

"Dimitri Kozlovski, I'd be ashamed." I gasp dramatically.

"Now you know how I feel."

I shake my head, "Whatever, I'll see you tomorrow." I gracefully exit the house, slightly tempting him. I smirk as I get back into my car... Maybe this would work after all. This weekend would likely tell me all I needed to know. And I had a feeling it was going to be one interesting weekend...

One I had been waiting on for a long time.

### Chapter Twenty-Six

When Friday morning came, I was almost twice as excited as I was the night before. This weekend was going to be awesome and I couldn't wait until my shift at the hospital was over because that would mean we would be on our way to the beach house.

And when I got to work, my day got at least five times better! Doctor Blum told us to leave work at lunch so we could get to the beach before sundown. I thanked him at least twenty times before my shift was over, but I couldn't help it. I hadn't been to the beach for quite some time and no, I'm not counting the accident, I wasn't there by choice.

Once the clock struck twelve, Dimitri and I were out of there. We didn't even bother to change out of our scrubs. The only pit stop we made was my apartment. I didn't even go in, I just parked my car and then hopped in with Dimitri. Of course, I called shotgun, but who wouldn't?

I could tell Dimitri was just as excited as I was. And once again, I felt like that love sick teenager. We hadn't been on a road trip since college but at that moment, it seemed just like yesterday...

"So, I was talking to Doctor Blum earlier and he gave me some pretty awesome news..." He smirks and glances at me.

"And what would that be?"

"Apparently, he had been talking to the Dean at my college... Instead of me finishing my internship this fall, I'll be finishing it in a few weeks."

"Really?" He nods. "Well, looks like I'll be attending a graduation, huh?"

"Yep, I'll finally be able to work on my own... You know, I was gonna mention that to you. I was thinking about opening up my own pediatric clinic and you know, I might need a head nurse..."

I was stunned, not because he asked me, but because I didn't know what to say... "I-I'm honored, really... But maybe we should wait and cross that bridge when we get to it?"

His smile diminishes, "What? You don't want to work with me?"

I shake my head, "No, no, it's not that... It's just I've worked in the same unit, with the same people for years..."

"Oh, I understand... Think about it, then?"

I nod, "Of course."

I felt really bad about that but I didn't want to make a poor decision. I really wanted to think about it. Weigh my options and see what I come up with.

After that, Dimitri dropped the work talk and we chatted randomly all the way to the beach. By the time we arrived, it was just after eight. It was a long drive, but well worth it. Doctor Blum didn't mess around, that's for sure. This place was nice!

Instead of a beach house, it looked more like a little cottage. It was made of dark cherry wood and it had a beautiful saltwater pool off to the side. "And you wonder why the man stays in Kentucky?" Dimitri adds, carrying our things inside.

"You're telling me... I'd move here, no questions asked." After I check out the outside, I head inside to find Dimitri but I kind of get distracted as I look around the living room and kitchen.

"Hey, Carrie? Come check this out!" I follow his voice and find him in the master bathroom. "Now that is what I call a Jacuzzi."

I look around the door as my eyes go wide, "Dang!" Yeah, and to think I thought the one in my apartment was nice. Ha! This one is like three times the size of mine. You could fit like eight people in there!

"I guess his wife is happy." Dimitri mumbles.

"Why? Did she ask for this to be added?"

He shakes his head, "No, he bought this house for their fifteenth anniversary. He said she always wanted a beach house to go to in the winter."

"Yeah, I think most Americans would share that want as well." I roll my eyes and walk back into the bedroom. Opposite the bed is a wall of glass with two sliding doors in the center. You could not believe the view from here. The sun sets directly in front of the house, allowing the light to cast a glittery orange shadow around the room. And you wonder why his wife liked the house so much?

Within a minute or two, arms wrap around my waist and I feel small kisses against my neck. I felt like I could die at any moment and honestly, I probably wouldn't care. At least I'd die happy.

I step forward as he reluctantly lets me go, "What now?" He asks, annoyed.

I smirk, "As I do recall, someone wasn't very kind to me yesterday... What makes you think I'm ready to make nice?" Playing hard to get with him was always fun.

He shakes his head, "Why don't we just call it even?"

I pause, "I suppose."

A smile crosses his face, "That's what I thought." He pulls me toward him and continues where he left off. I decide to play nice this time so I don't interrupt.

I'm just waiting for his lips to be on mine, but he's teasing me. I don't want him to get the satisfaction, so I ignore it. He soon realizes that. "Carrie, you have to be the most stubborn woman I've ever met."

I chuckle as he finally kisses me. It seems like we stayed that way forever, never breaking the kiss... My lungs were crying out for air but I couldn't make myself pull away. I had missed this. This was my heaven.

Anywhere with him was.

That's when I knew.

I knew Sarah was right. He was the one I was supposed to spend my life with and suddenly, there was no doubt in my mind he would be my husband. We were meant to be... We always had been.

Before I knew it, Dimitri broke the kiss so we could both catch our breath. "I think we should stay inside tonight, what do you think?" He smiles.

"No way, I have to check out the beach." I joke knowing I'm driving him crazy.

"Carrie," He groans.

I chuckle, "I was just kidding."

#~#~#~#~#~#

I don't remember how early it was when Dimitri woke me, but I didn't mind. Waking up to kisses could never upset me, no way. "So, how long are you staying in your apartment now?" He smiles.

"What do you mean? I just leased it."

"You still don't want to move in with me?"

I sigh, "Just because we're together again, doesn't mean I have to move back in."

"But I want you to... It's not my house... It's ours."

I didn't feel like arguing. "We'll see, okay?"

Suddenly, Dimitri's phone started ringing. I thought he would answer but he didn't move. "Answer it, it might be work."

"Exactly and we are off for the weekend."

"At least see who it is."

He rolls over and picks it up off the nightstand. "It's Ivan..."

"Just answer the dang phone!"

Finally, he did. "Ivan, this better be good... What do you mean where am I? I told you Carrie and I were going to the beach for the weekend... She did what?" He sits up, alarmed. "When?" His voice changes, something's wrong. "We'll be there as soon as we can."

"What's wrong?" I ask as he starts gathering our things.

"Get ready, we've got to go... Mom's in the hospital."

### Chapter Twenty-Seven

The news of Alena's illness shocked us both. It was so sudden and when Dimitri told me what Ivan had said, I was really scared... She had been complaining of severe headaches for a very long time, but she always refused to go to the Doctor until last night. Ivan said that she woke him up around midnight, crying in pain. He knew it had to be bad for her to want to go to the emergency room so after they got her dressed, he drove her and Isaak to the closest hospital.

They ran MRI's and CT scans and finally gave her some pain medication for relief about an hour later. When the Doctor came back in, he didn't have good news and that's when Ivan called Dimitri. So far, all we know is that there is some kind of mass on her brain. Of course, in a medical professional's point of view, that's never good and the first thing I thought of was brain cancer.

Once you've worked in the medical field, you always think the worst and brain cancer was definitely the worst of the worst. I knew Dimitri was thinking the same thing but on the way back home, he started naming off everything it could be. I knew he was trying to have hope but according to what Ivan had told me, I was almost certain of her diagnosis.

The entire ride there, we only stopped a hand full of times. Usually, for food and gas. Dimitri was determined to get there as fast as he could and it seemed like I had to keep reminding him of the speed limit.

I was rather surprised that we didn't get pulled over but I guess that was luck. If we had, Dimitri would have definitely gone to jail, guaranteed. Going thirty miles over the speed limit was considered a felony around here... Big time.

After hours and hours of driving, we finally made it to the hospital. I had never been here before but I had heard good things about it from Doctor's I had worked with. Ivan texted Dimitri the floor and room number and when we got up there, the Doctor was walking out of her room. "You must be Alena's other son, the Doctor?" He asks.

"Yes, Dimitri Kozlovski, nice to meet you."

"Doctor Kelley. I would like to speak with you if that's alright?"

"Of course." Dimitri nods for me to follow as we walk into a plain white office. "This is Carrie Bryan. She's a nurse where I work."

"Nice to meet you also, Ms. Bryan... Now, Dimitri, I believe your brother has given you a few details, correct?" Dimitri nods. "Your mother does have a large mass on the left side of her brain. As you know, it controls logic... I've done quite a few tests and I'm afraid it does seem that the mass is cancerous. However, I believe it is in its earliest stages and with chemotherapy and radiation, I believe we can put it into remission." I was afraid to hear that.

"Does she know?" Dimitri asks.

"Yes. Your mother is a very strong woman and she let me know that God would take care of her and if it was time for her to go, nothing I could do would save her."

I smile a bit. That sounds just like Alena. "Did she agree to do chemo?" I ask.

"Yes, she did. I would like to start them as soon as possible. Tomorrow, to be exact... If you guys have any questions, please do not hesitate to find me." After we left his office, we went to see Alena. She wasn't sad, she was smiling, happy to see us as always.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to speak with Carrie alone, please... And when she leaves," She turns to Dimitri. "I'd like you to come in, okay?"

They all nod in agreement as I sit next to her. She smiles and grasps my hand. "I know you've talked with the Doctor but just because I didn't get the greatest of news, doesn't mean I can't live my life. I'll tell you what I told him. God's in control. I know it, dear, and if it's my time to go, then so be it. But I want to ask a favor of you."

"Alena, you know I'll do whatever it is."

"I know, dear, but first, let me ask you something... Do you truly love my son with all of your heart?" Well, I wasn't quite expecting that...

"Of course, Alena. You already know that."

"Could you see yourself marrying him? Having children and living life to the fullest?"

"Yes, I always have... Where is this coming from?"

She sighs, "Carrie, when Dimitri brought you home to meet us for the first time all those years ago, you were just a teenager. What, fourteen years old?" I nod. "I could tell the way he looked at you that you were the one. I told Isaak, that very night, that one day, you'd be my daughter-in-law. And when Dimitri decided to leave for the army, I didn't think it was a mistake because it truly showed how committed you were to each other. I told him, when we met Rebecca, that she was different. He liked her because, in ways, she was like you, but yet so different. He didn't look at her the way he did you. No passion and love... When I heard about the plane crash, I knew there was a reason he was on that plane. And when I heard the list of names, I knew why. You're supposed to be together and now, I can finally get to that favor."

I never thought it'd be getting a lecture from Alena, especially in the hospital... "I've talked with Dimitri many times since you've gotten back together, even over the last week or so and no matter what happens, he tells me the same thing, 'Mom, I'd still marry her. Right now, if she'd let me.' Now, I don't know how long I have here on this earth..."

"Oh, Alena, don't say that."

"No, it's alright... I don't know but there is one thing I want to see before I go... I know this is asking a lot and I know he hasn't proposed properly yet, but it would be an honor to see your wedding. I'd be the proudest momma on earth." Oh, wow... "Now, I know Dimitri has to pull all the bells and whistles which is why I've asked to talk to him too. But dear, if you don't feel that you're ready, just tell me. I'll understand."

How in the world could I say no? "Alena, I told Dimitri before. If he asked me to marry him right this second, I'd say yes."

She smiles widely, "I knew you'd say that... Would you go tell him to come in, please?" I nod and walk out into the hallway.

"She wants to talk to you." Dimitri nods as I stand against the wall. Once I hear the door shut behind him, I start to get a little nervous...

What would he say?

What would she ask him?

### Chapter Twenty-Eight

_Dimitri_ _'s Point of View_

I wasn't sure what mom wanted to talk to me about and that kind of scared me. Usually, she wasn't this secretive, which really made me wonder what this was about. So, when Carrie told me to go, I was still nervous but also relieved. Carrie didn't seem upset so it couldn't be anything too bad.

"Aw, son, sit with me please." I walk over to her bedside and sit down in the small wooden chair. She smiles at me. "I guess you're wondering what this about, huh?" I nod. "I asked Carrie a few things and I told her my only wish. The same wish that I'm about to tell you..."

"And what would that be?"

"I love both of my children, but you're my baby. Honestly, I never saw Ivan getting married but now, with the right woman, I think there's a chance. But not anytime soon... He still has a lot of growing up to do, you know... Anyhow, you remember that talk we had when you brought Carrie over this last time?"

"The marriage one? Yes."

"I talked to Carrie about it. And she told me the same thing I'd been telling you the past couple weeks. She loves you, dear. She would marry you at any time."

I chuckle, "Kind of funny she turned me down last week."

Mom rolls her eyes. "Oh, now you know that was no proposal. That was just you acting out of sadness. You didn't want her to move out, so you tried to think of any reason to get her to stay. She deserves a real proposal, dear. With a beautiful ring. I guarantee you, she'd say yes."

"And how does this have anything to do with your wish?"

"My wish, dear, is to see my baby get married. I want to go to the wedding, while I'm still well and attend not only as the groom's mother but also the bride's. I never had a daughter, at least not until you brought her home the first time. She already filled my first wish. Now, it's up to you to fill the last."

I had never ever seen my mother this way... I could tell she really wanted this, with all her heart and I was going to give it to her. Besides, after the first proposal went bad, I went out and bought a ring. I didn't know how long I'd keep it, but it didn't matter. When the time was right, the time was right. "This is going to be fun," I smirk as a grin crosses her face.

"Thank you, son. You'll never know how much this means to me, but please, do wait for the perfect time... I don't want Carrie expecting it. It should be a surprise."

"Oh, you know it will be." Now, to just pick a good time and place. Looks like I need to start planning for this...

Carrie's Point of View

It sure seemed like Dimitri was in there a long time... I tried to eavesdrop, but they were talking so low, I couldn't make out a word they were saying. Finally, after what seemed like forever, Dimitri came back into the hallway. He had a mischievous smile on his face. "Mom said you guys can come back in now... But she told me to take Carrie to the house and let us rest a bit. We'll be back first thing tomorrow morning."

We start to walk toward the elevator as Dimitri yells back to Ivan. "If you hear anything else, let me know." Ivan agrees and we continue to the car.

"So, what did she say to you?" I ask curiously.

"Oh, you know... The usual... You?"

Secretive, huh? "The usual..." I reply.

Isaak and Alena's house wasn't too far from the hospital and it didn't take long for us to get there, which was a good thing considering I was almost sick of road trips. Sitting in one place for long periods of time did not make me happy, at all.

Once Dimitri unlocked the door, he carried some of our stuff upstairs then he told me something I was quite surprised to hear. "You can take a shower up here. I'll take one downstairs. So, take your time."

I cock an eyebrow, "Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

He chuckles, "Just fine, thank you." And with that, he was gone. I thought it was a little odd, but hey, if I had permission to take a long shower, I'd be crazy not to. I planned on taking my sweet time and that's exactly what I did...

By the time I showered and got ready, hair, makeup, and all, it had been about an hour and a half. When I went back out into the bedroom, I expected Dimitri to be there, but he wasn't... Instead, I found a trail of rose petals out the door and a note lying on the bed. I picked it up and read:

Let's take a little journey, shall we?

The rose petals will act as your guide on this journey. Along the way, you will find these cards. Each card will tell you a special memory I have of us. At the end, you will find me, along with another card to, hopefully, mark a new memory of us.

"Aw!" I couldn't help but squeal a little... That was so cute! I didn't waste any time, I headed out the door and found the first note on the stairs...

August 16th, 2000

Our second day of high school. My second day in an American school.

I was so terribly nervous, I was so afraid no one would like me, but once I got there, I was quite surprised. I made friends easily and thankfully, the English I had learned saved me a lot of trouble...

_I remember when the lunch bell rang. Everyone seemed so excited and I couldn't figure out why. It was just lunch... What was so special? For some of them, it was because they got to see friends they didn't have_ class _with... For others, it meant that half of the day was over with. But for me, it was none of those things..._

For me, it was the time I met the love of my life.

A tear escaped my eye. Who knew Dimitri could be this romantic? I've known him for a long time and I've never seen him this way, but I have to admit, I like it.

I continued down the stairs and followed the petals into the kitchen where another note lay on the counter...

August 17th, 2000

I realized you were in my science class and finally got up enough nerve to sit by you. You were extremely shy, but eventually, you warmed up to me and once you did, I had a feeling about you... And now, all these years later, I'm glad that 'feeling' was right.

Next, the rose petals lead me to the living room. Yet another note laid on the couch.

December 20th, 2000

On this day, you stood in my parent's living room and met them for the first time. I could tell you and my Mom hit it off instantly and that's when I knew... Any girl that got along with my mother as well as you did, had to be the one.

This was also the day I asked you out on our very first date.

Thank you for saying yes, by the way.

I laughed at the last line as I added it the stack of notes I was gathering in my hand. I moved on to the next one.

April 29th, 2004

Senior Prom.

We sure made a name for ourselves, didn't we? Prom King and Queen. I remember the weeks leading up to that day... You were so afraid that I would win and you wouldn't. I kept telling you that it would never happen, they loved us as a couple, not apart. And I was right. That was probably one of my favorite high school memories.

I continued to follow the path down the hall by the stairwell...

June 19th, 2006

This is a memory, but not a very good one... This was the day that I entered the army... The day I left you behind... And the day I regret the most.

This day haunts me in my dreams. I can still see your expression as I closed the door... I can hear all those pleading voicemails you left me on my phone. This was the worst day of my life. But a milestone in our relationship, nonetheless.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?

I roll my eyes at the sudden Kelly Clarkson reference. I come to the patio door and read the last note...

June 28th, 2013

The day of the plane crash. I think for most survivors, that was probably the worst day of our life... For me, it was one of the best, because it gave me the second chance I had been hoping for.

We're both quite stubborn, so I guess that's why it took something so dramatic to get our attention. But hey, we worked our problems out. And now, we're here...

Flip the card over and open the door.

I did as it said...

August 11th, 2013

This is it... This is the day that I ask you to marry me. Why? Because I love you with all my heart. No one else could ever make me feel the way you do. You may be the most stubborn, single-minded, hard-headed woman I've ever met, but then again, you'd have to be to put up with me.

Now, open the door so I can really ask you... :)

I smile as I open the door. Dimitri is down on one knee, paler than a ghost.

"So, Carrie Bryan... Will you do me the honor of being my wife? Will you marry me?" He finally says, opening a blue velvet box, revealing that gorgeous diamond ring.

"Of course, I will, you idiot!" He slips the ring on my finger and kisses me.

"Well, if I have to be an idiot, at least I'm your idiot."

### Chapter Twenty-Nine

August 11th, 2013

That was the best day of my life... Well, to date, of course. Dimitri couldn't have surprised me more. After talking to Alena, I kind of figured that our engagement was coming, but no way was I expecting it that soon.

And the way he proposed was just magical. Honestly, I was just expecting a nice dinner and maybe finding the ring on my desert or something like that, but let me tell you, I liked his idea much better.

I know that I had told him that I wanted that romantic proposal everyone else had, but he went well over my expectations. I can guarantee you no one else, at least that I knew of, had anything like that. It was so perfect...

The next morning, I couldn't wait to get to the hospital. I had to tell Alena everything and when I did, she cried just as I had. She told Dimitri she was proud of him, that he had to have a pretty good imagination to come up with something that fast.

And she was right. He had to be one quick thinker to pull that one, but I guess that's why he's a Doctor. Speaking of which, about three weeks later, the whole family got to watch him walk across the stage. He had finally graduated from medical school and no one could have been more proud than Alena.

She was weak from all her treatments, but she still insisted on coming and sitting in the front row. Dimitri was the first to go to college on her side of the family and she made sure she was there to see it.

Dimitri was especially happy that she got to be there and I think he enjoyed the fact that when he got off stage, she told him that even though he had a fancy diploma and 'Doctor' was now legally at the beginning of his name, he'd still always be her baby.

Once the excitement wore off, Dimitri got straight to work. Doctor Blum gave him a position at his office while Dimitri worked on opening his own clinic. He was so enthused about it, I didn't even bother him with the wedding details.

Instead, I planned the whole thing, but with a little help from Alena, of course. I felt that it was important to include her in the wedding and it gave us a lot more bonding time...

You know, every little girl dreams of telling their mother that they're engaged. But that was something that I had never thought about. My parents didn't care what I did but even though they weren't included, I felt like Alena filled that gap... She had acted like the mother figure I had always dreamed of and to me, she'd always be referred to as 'Mom' and not 'Mother-in-law'.

The planning went well and the wedding was scheduled for September 28th, 2013. Alena and I were quite proud of ourselves since we had managed to put the whole thing together within a matter of about six weeks. It seems nearly impossible to some, but when you have some extra willpower behind you, you can do just about anything...

Before the big day came, Dimitri and I had one last event to attend. And that event just happened to be our class reunion. Before Dimitri and I got back together, I had always kind of dreaded it, but now, I was so ready.

And when we walked in, it felt just like high school. Everyone ran to us, they couldn't believe we were together again and after the million questions about the plane crash, we actually did enjoy ourselves. And I can't wait to attend the next one because then, we may have a few little ones to come along, as well, if you know what I mean...

September 28th, 2013

The big day! The day I had been waiting for since I was just a little girl... I had dreamed about my wedding since I was old enough to talk and now, it was finally here... It took long enough, don't you think?

That morning was so crazy. I was absolutely stressed to my max and Alena tried to take care of as many things as she could while I was getting ready. If I thanked her a hundred times a day, for the rest of my life, it would never be enough. She was my angel sent from heaven.

She felt much better, as she had finished her first round of chemo and her body was regaining its strength. And the day before the wedding, we got the best news! The chemo had worked, she was in remission. The tumor had shrunk and I think that was the first day that we all gathered around her hospital bed and just cried...

Not out of sadness, but out of relief.

It wasn't until that night that I decided who I wanted to walk me down the aisle.

Alena.

And when I told her of my decision, she was so excited, she could barely speak. These were the moments that I really kept close to my heart. The moments alone with her, never knowing when it would be our last...

Our wedding was simple, elegant, and to the point. It had a very country, traditional feel, which was just the theme Dimitri and I had agreed on. It was a backyard wedding and it was held on Isaak and Alena's property. We invited only our closest of friends and the ceremony was held just before sunset.

I can still remember how nervous I was before I walked down the lighted aisle. Alena prayed with me right before, and after that, I felt calm. She held on to my hand as we walked down the aisle. I didn't look at Dimitri until I stood with him, since I knew I would cry if I did.

The ceremony was short but I still remember our vows like it was yesterday...

" _Many people spend their lives searching for their soul mate, their one true love. Some people are lucky to find the person they can truly call the better half of_ themselves _while others spend the rest of their lives searching and never finding. I am happy to count myself among the lucky ones because I found you." He takes a shaky breath. "I love you, Carrie, I know you are the only one for me, my one true love. I'm happy and I'm grateful that you came into my life, that where others have spent their entire lives looking for the other one, I have found you. And now that I have found you, I'll never let you go. I promise you, Carrie, that I'll hold you and cherish you, and give you my heart, that I'll support you and care for you. Faithfully, I will always stand_ steadfast _by your side with your hand in mine, regardless of what life would bring us. I take you now as my wife and I shall remain so for the rest of my life."_

Yeah, and just as I expected, I cried through the whole thing. I begged him before hand to really try and not ruin my makeup, but did he listen? No, but then again, was I really expecting him to?

" _Dimitri_ _, it should come as no surprise to you and to me when I say that we have had our rough times... Pretty rough times to be precise. But even through our most heated of moments, I never felt defeated. In fact, I felt alive, incredibly alive. Sensations never came to me in this magnitude before as they do now when I'm with you. You bring out the best in me. You are the one thing which gives me purpose in life. The one person I think of at the exact second I wake up every morning._ _Dimitri_ _, I have no other choice but to name you as my husband and honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you."_

So, after all, was said and done, we ended up making each other cry... I guess it was a win, win situation...

Now, I know I said earlier that August 11th, 2013 was the best day of my life, but it kind of tied with September 28th. One day I was engaged to the love of my life, the next day, I got to spend the rest of my life with him.

What else could a girl want?

### Epilogue

We spent our honeymoon in Hawaii, the same place we were both headed when our paths crossed once more. I think we were both a little nervous on the plane ride, I mean, wouldn't you be? The accident was a little traumatic, but thankfully, everything went just as planned.

It was nice to have some alone time but after the third day, we were both a little homesick... I guess it was a good choice to only book five days instead of seven.

As soon as we got home, I found that Alena, Isaak, and Ivan had taken the liberty of helping me move, something I hadn't planned on doing until we got back. But they told me it was a gift from them and I didn't bother arguing. I was so thankful for the extra help and now, I didn't have to do it. All my things were already at Dimitri -, I mean, _our_ house. They unpacked and everything!

Once we were back in our normal work routine, I felt like my dream had finally come true... I was married to the man of my dreams and I had the best job in the world... Speaking of jobs, Dimitri had his clinic up and running within the next year and I decided to take the job of Head Nurse. I was happy where we were in our life but I had also had the dream of children and so had Dimitri's family.

Alena would ask me almost every time I saw her if we were planning on having kids soon and I couldn't really say. We hadn't really talked about it much... The first time I mentioned it, Dimitri was trying to get his clinic together and we decided to wait.

But after a year of having the clinic up and running, we finally decided things had slowed down enough to try. And within the month, I came up pregnant with our first child. I wish you could have seen Alena's reaction when I told her, it was so perfect! She and Isaak were so excited to be expecting their first grandchild.

Nine months later, Eloise Alena Kozlovski was born. She was full term, nine pounds seven ounces. A beautiful, healthy baby girl. She's definitely our outspoken one. She likes to have all our attention, all the time. But after all, she is the first born.

When Eloise was about three, I turned up pregnant once again. And this time, it was a beautiful, bouncing baby boy. Owen Isaak Kozlovski was born almost two weeks late. Yeah, he was the difficult one, he wanted to stay inside mommy as long as possible even though mommy was ready to not be pregnant.

Owen's pretty shy, but also very smart. I can tell, he's just like his daddy, already. He loves reading and actually learned the entire alphabet before he even started Preschool. I tell Dimitri every day, I think we'll have another Doctor in the house in a couple years.

Since all of you are wondering, yes, after almost fifteen years since graduating high school, I finally had my fairytale. I had the perfect job, the best husband a girl could ask for, and two fantastic kids that remind me of myself and Dimitri each and every day.

Dimitri asked me the other day if I remembered how we were in high school and do you know what I said? No, I don't. I don't need to. The way we were then is nothing like us now. Why would you want to go back chapters in the book when you can go forward?

He was a little surprised at my answer, but he agreed. We're so much better now than we were before.

We've had a rough road.

A _very_ rough road, but it just proves, that if you really love someone, love will always prevail.

###

Thank you so much for reading my book. If you enjoyed it, won't you please take a moment to leave me a review at your favorite retailer?

Thanks!

Cheyenne Barnett

### Acknowledgements

To my loving family, thank you for supporting me on what seemed like a never-ending journey. To momma and daddy, for allowing me to be myself and encouraging me to do what I love best. To granny and papaw, for raising me to be a strong willed woman.

To Heather, for answering the phone and listening to me babble on and on about each chapter. For being there when I needed her and supporting me in my odd dream.

To all my wonderful fans on Wattpad, for giving me the chance to build upon my ideas and always encouraging me to continue.

And lastly to you, the reader, you are the reason I'm here, today and tomorrow. Without you, there would be no Cheyenne Barnett, the author. I cannot thank you enough!

### About the Author

Cheyenne began writing at an early age. When she was just 11 years old, she began posting fanfictions online, but it wasn't until she was 17, that she finally ventured out and started her very first fiction novel called, What Hurts The Most. She published the army romance novel on Wattpad and it became an instant hit with army wives everywhere. Now, 18, Cheyenne has begun her six-year journey through college, in hopes of becoming a Nurse Practitioner.

### Discover Other Titles by Cheyenne Barnett

What Hurts The Most

You're Still The One

Heartbreak Warfare

### Connect with Cheyenne

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