LET'S PLAY !
This is Los Santos.
Alright? We're all familiar with it.
Yeah, in GTA V.
Yes.
And it's so broke!
Shut up, idiot.
I have identified
a location to hit.
Alright.
It's a six-person job.
Everybody's gonna have an equal share, we're all gonna be on board
My estimation is that this location
uh, you guys remember from the 24/7 Supermarket?
- Yeah
- Yeah
- Yeah
Yeah? Convenience store?
Open all day right here.
Well there's one downtown.
- Or actually, it's in the - 
- That's a big take.
- It's at north, it's just, just uh,
- I don't know if we're ready to hit that yet
Just south of downtown, it's in South Los Santos.
Uh, I estimate,
I've done some research, preliminary
They are gonna have between 12 and 18 hundred dollars on hand.
- So,
- [whistles]
we pull this off, everybody's gonna come outta here
- two to three hundred dollars richer.
- Four fucking digits!
Yeah. Exactly.
I, Gavin and I,
are gonna rob the place.
- Plan G!
- Plan G.
Alright. Ray, you're the best shot,
you're gonna be our sniper.
You're gonna provide the cover.
- Countin' on you, Ray!
- No pressure.
Ryan, you're our boat man.
Boat man.
- Ryan the boat guy.
- Get that?
- Boat guy?
- Nautical. Got it.
Jack, you're the wheel man, you're the driver.
Everybody knows you're the best driver.
Michael, you blow shit up.
Wild card.
- Raise the ruckus!
- (laughter)
We're gonna end up
at the top of Mount Chiliad.
Right?
And that's where we're gonna split the money, we're gonna go our separate ways.
Here at the corner of Innocence and Elegant Avenue,
is our 24/7 supermarket.
You'll know it 'cause there's the Hands On Car Wash across the street,
you guys know what I'm talkin' about?
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Alright.
So what we're gonna do,
Gavin,
Geoff,
and Jack are gonna roll up,
in an unmarked, stolen, sprayed, vehicle
You gotta put some work into this
You gonna have to get maybe an SUV
Something with dark tinted windows, uh, armoured wheels
Limo tint
- Limo tint
- Yeah, for sure
Jack, you're gonna be in the car waiting for us
Right?
We're gonna go inside, we're gonna rob the place
We're gonna have to kill the guy
We're gonna have to kill everybody
Gavin, and I
Anybody that sees our faces is gonna have to die
I'm on board
Maybe even somebody that saw somebody's face who saw our face, they gotta die too
We're also gonna blow up every vehicle, there can be no traces of us left
Okay?
So
We go in, we rob the joint
While we're doing that, I want you to plant sticky explosives around the outside
We wanna cause maximum carnage that's gonna confuse the cops
Okay?
Ray, you're across the street, one building west
of, the Hands On Car Wash, on the second floor of the warehouse, sniping
Carnage is going on, we hop out
We're gonna drive west, Jack this is important, this is you
Down Innocence, take a right on Power Street, it's the first right
Power Street
On Power Street
is going to be an alleyway
immediately on our left
Michael, you're there, next to the alleyway, in a bus. Something big, bus, tank, or something
We're going to go through the alley. You're going to immediately pull forward and block access to the alley, right?
Then, we're gonna hop out of our vehicle. There's gonna be two identical vehicles in the backside of that alley
Right?
Ryan, you're gonna be in one, with it running and wait. I'm gonna hop into the vehicle with you, okay?
We're gonna go one way
You guys are gonna hop in the other vehicle. You're gonna come back out around to the main strip
You're going to then confuse the cops. You're gonna blow up
Nothing's left
- Nothing's left. You're gonna blow up -
- There's no dental records, there's no DNA, there's no hair there's no fire, there's no nothing.
- Yeah, and this is gonna get a little bit hairy 'cause there's gonna be cops all around
You're gonna have to blow up a bus, and the other vehicle
I'll be using everything. I've got the mini gun, I've got rocket launchers, I've got sticky bombs
- As soon as you get that vehicle and all that shit blown up
- I got a bus stop
You got a bus stop
As soon as you get that stuff blown up, Ray, is gonna get off of his roof
He's gonna hop down, there's a motorcycle waiting for him behind the warehouse
He's gonna hop on the motorcycle, probably a Sanchez, something manoeuvrable
He's gonna pull up. You're gonna hop on the motorcycle. You guys are gonna take off. You guys are going to go
You guys are then going to go east, you're gonna draw the cops east
You're gonna go all the way around. This is where it's gonna get dicey, you're gonna have to lose the cops at some point
This is just the reality of the situation, alright?
While you guys are going up, you're going to approach Mount Chiliad, after you lose the cops
via Braddock Pass, okay? We're all gonna approach Mount Chiliad from different directions
Now, Jack and Gavin
You guys are going to then run interference. You're gonna be crazy driving around, just confusing the hell out of the cops
- They're gonna think you guys have the money
- I don't even understand what that means
This is just nonsense
- There's just too much chaos on that thing
- Exactly
Then, at some point you're going to make your way over to uh, the Tongva Drive, okay?
You guys are gonna come up
Hit 66
Go up the Great Ocean Highway and approach
Mount Chiliad from Raton Canyon. Hopefully at this point, you've already lost the cops
- Alright, while all this is going on
- Gavin
Ryan and I
We have now gone into the alley, we have hopped into the vehicle, he's sitting there waiting for me
We are then going to drive around to Puerto del Sol
- Puerto! Rico...
- It's just a dock. Okay
Puerto del Sol is right here. There's gonna be a speedboat waiting for us. Ryan you're gonna have to get us a boat
- No problem.
- Ryan and I are gonna hop in the boat
See the nautical thing
- Nautical, came back around
- Smooth sailing for us. We're gonna have a nice leisurely
- Boat ride
- You guys can have margaritas
Up here, is a dock. It's right here, okay?
We are going to leisurely go to this dock. There's a bait and tackle shop there
'Kay? They have hamburgers, they're really good hamburgers
- Oh sweet
- Alright, hop out here
There's a little scenic overlook. There, there is going to be nondescriptive vehicle waiting for us. I'll take care of that
- It'll be parked for us. Yeah
- Nondescript...
- Super unassuming
- Geoff the nondescript guy
- You and I are then gonna hop in
that vehicle and we are going to approach Mount Chiliad from the lumbering yard
- Don't worry, the vehicle will make sense with the...
- Got wood?
Everything goes okay, we all converge on Mount Chiliad together
We just gotta hop in GTA, we gotta find a van, gotta get a boat, we gotta get a bus, we gotta get a Sanchez and then three
- SUVs
- I think there's one thing - generally one more thing we need to get
- What is that?
Masks
- It's true
- It is true
- Ryan is the mask guy
We'll definitely get masks
So, Alpha team is Geoff and Ryan
Jack and Gavin. Bravo 1, Bravo 2
Haha, you're Bravo shit
Charlie team
- Charlie 1, Charlie 2
- You're Charlie shit
- Fuck
- (laughter)
- Alright?
- Let's do it
Alright, everybody got it?
- Got it
- Yep
- Ready to go
-Easy
So step one will be to tour the scene of the crime
Uh, let's all hop in the crew mobile
- Alright, and, uh, Michael, I'll go ahead and set a waypoint when we get down there and you can take us through it
- Yeah, sure
If you guys wanna head out front, I will hit the garage and grab my car
- Ugh, gotta calm my nerves
- Be right there guys
Ray, no!
- I gotta calm my nerves. Oh fuck
- Ray, no!
- Lubing the ol' pipes before the heist, ah!
- Alright hold on. Alright, this is gonna go great
- Bit of a cluster fuck at the front door
Except for Gavin who is getting bevved up before leaving
- Gavin's bevving up?
- I was told there would be bevs
Yeah, there's bevs in the apartment
Yeah, I'm just having a little bev
- Oh and Ray is...
- Ray no!
- I'm fucking - I gotta chill out man
- No!
- This is nerve-racking 
- God, I realised it's my apartment but you could ask first
- I could die for realsies
- Christ Ray
Don't worry, you can't OD on weed
- I blazed so hard, my mask came off. And it's back
- (laughter)
- Since I'm here, I might as well try some
- You had to move it
- You couldn't use the bong properly
- Who's motorcycle is this?
- Uhh think that's Gavin's
- Guess I'll try that another time
- Bing bong
Oh what's going on here?
- Alright, everyone meet out front
- Oh God Michael, I'm in your apartment
I'm in your garage
- How do I get out of here?
- I said go out front
- Yeah, why did you go to the garage Gavin?
- Why did you go to the garage?
- Oh
- Just walk out dude
Guess I'm not high anymore
- Yeah it doesn't lasy very long Ray
- Oh
That's the problem with being a drug user, you're always chasing the high
You know, you got it then it's gone. How're you gonna top that?
And then you're dead
I hear a horn. Where's the uh- Where is everyone?
We're out front
- You wanna hear a horn baby, this is a horn to hear
- Oh shit, it's Optimus Prime
- Okay, I will go ahead and set a waypoint for us, Michael
- That's a fucking horn
That is classy
I'm in
- Alright, just waiting for Gavin to leave my garage
- I accidentally went out the backdoor. So, uh, be right there
What, isn't that where Michael came out?
- Oh is it?
- You just leave him there
- Sure is
I mean I didn't see him
You got the waypoint?
- Alright
- Alright
- You left the door open Gavin
- Just shut the door
- Shut the door. Get off Gavin
- Come off Gavin
- Hold on
- We gotta look cool, you're not making us look cool
- You wanna shut the door Jack?
- Jack you'll have to get out and get back in
- Wait no no, I'll shut it like this
- Hang on
- Nope
- (laughter)
God dammit
Ay!
Oh, what was that?
- Waste him!
- Yeah, I'm gonna agree with Ryan
- Uh, does he know what he just did?
- Waste him
- That poor guy on a bike
- Oh great, a wanted level, that's awesome
That's a good way to start our heist
We haven't robbed anything yet and we're already wanted
Well we can't be made a buster Geoff
My car just got destroyed!
Why?!
- It's okay Ray, don't worry
- My vehicle was destroyed!
Well, these things happen
Alright
Oh, I destroyed a personal vehicle?!
- Okay so Geoff, I'll head to the heist spots
- I got none of the blame for that
- No don't! Don't take the cops to it
- Don't worry, I'll lose these suckers
Lose the cops real fast and then we'll go
- Geoff, this baby's souped up, although Ryan and Gavin. They may not survive
- Quick call to my insurance while we're here
Uh yeah, it's a little exposed back here
- It's okay
- Gavin watch out
- (screaming)
- (laughing)
- So Ryan's out
Ryan, get out
Get out? I'm dead
- No, as in get out of the room
- No, it doesn't count, the heist hasn't started yet
This is preliminary heistings
- I'm down here guys
- Good Lord
- Things have already gone wrong and we haven't started yet
Ryan, you don't wanna get in now man
- Give Lester a call
- We're good, we're getting further away
- Man, we look cool
- Or is Lester on vacation
- You can't call Lester when you're a car with other people
- You wouldn't think someone with a car like this would even try and rob a shop
- Well, we're not gonna rob the shop with this
- It's true
- We're gonna have dummy vehicles
- You and I have to find some vehicles Gavin
- We're gonna have clean cars
This is also practice at losing the po-po
Populous
And it's a team building exercise
Yeah, minus Ryan
- Almost minus Gavin
- We can build a new team without Ryan
Ow, I banged my arm
- Don't worry guys, I'm almost caught up
- Haha, you tryna take Gavin out?
- It's a scary world
- Ah, shit
- Woops
- Don't see me, don't see me, don't see me, don't see- God dammit!
Oh, they saw you dude
- (sigh)
- Woah
You guys have got a lot of police attention
I wonder if they'll notice that
- There goes Gavin
- God dammit
- Oh they're shooting
- Now we should be fine Geoff
- Oh!
- You just drove right into some
- Yeah I know, I gotta drive past them
- Ryan
- Yeah, so uh
- Oh no
- Yeah, I'll pick you up, don't worry
Outcasts, band together
We'll pick you guys up after we lose the wanted level
- Alright Gavin, coming for ya
- Which Michael is about to do right here, this is great
- Ass heroes!
- Ass heroes!
- Alright
- We just lost our wanted le- no we didn't
- No we didn't, back up, back up
Got experience. Oh, for cruising with players, sorry
- Was that style?
- You dinged my fender
- Uh, yeah you were going ass over head, was that stylish?
- Fender bender
- Yeah
- Oh, I think we're gonna get spotted.
- Nah we're not-
Oh yeah, we evaded it
- Alright let's go pick those idiots up and then head to the
- Alright
Okay so that's some of the things that we'll have to deal with during the heist guys
- Thins escalate quickly
- You gotta watch out for that
Alright, we're coming up on your behind
Alright, well don't cum on my behind
Butt cumin'
Uhh... yeah, they are directly behind us
- Sticky butt
- Alright, hop in the car
- Just taint
- Got it
No problem
Woah
- Alright Gavin, smooth exit
- Get in!
- Have another second to get in Gavin, yeah
- Oh, Clucking Bell!
Oh, I like the big trunk on the back
- Our big, uh big booties
- Yeah we can keep our...
Too many jokes to make, too much of a layout
- There's like a picnic in there
- Alright, so here we are
We're scoping it out first
- You guys may wanna put your guns away
- Okay, so pull up slowly
- They can't
- Can't
- So here it is up on our left
- I can pull a bigger gun out
- Is this it?
- This is our 24/7 Supermarket
- Don't stop yet, don't stop yet
- Keep driving, I'll park around the corner
- Act casual
- Alright yeah, park around the corner
- We don't wanna make it too suspicious
- I'm gonna walk you guys through it
- So I'll park on the sidewalk
- Okay
- Are we all gonna stroll in?
- I thought you were stopping
- Alright
We shouldn't all stroll in, we should have like uh surveillance, one or two people tops
- Alright
- Act casual
- Probably don't want six guys walking into a convenience store
- Gav, put your gun away
Also, when you go in, make sure you buy gum
- Or something
- How do you put your gun away?
- Hold on, I'll check out the roof
- Ray, don't do t-  I'll show you where you're going
- You gotta, you go-
- I- It's not here?
- No
You're on the roof of the store we're gonna rob, Ray
- Nah, but I'm checking if there's anything up here
- You need to get across the street
- That's not where you need to go
Like hidden cameras and shit
- Alright, everybody
- That have a good view of the roof
- Jack goes in, Jack goes in and buys some beers
- They can see your face now Ray
- Shit, you're right
- (laughter)
- Off the roof
- Everybody else hang out over here
- Inconspicuous
Act natural, I'm gonna smoke. Hold on
Good. Ryan, no, that'll kill you
Hmm
- Let's see, what do I want?
- I'm gonna lean on the wall like Jay and Silent Bob
- You have to, you gotta act casual
- Uhh, so
- You selling drugs? Can I buy a dime bag?
- Maybe, uh. You got anything local?
- Where's Michael?
- Snoochie boochies. I'm round the corner
- No, no? Okay
- I didn't wanna run in the store with everybody else
- I'm casual
- Okay, check it out
- Ooh, donuts, ring donuts
- I look totally inconspicuous
- Alright, I'm gonna go in and buy something
- God dammit
- Jack already did
Everybody's in the god damn store
- I'm gonna buy something
- This guy's gonna be so ready for us
- Nah he's dumb
- There won't even be any security camera footage
- I'm gonna use the ATM
- The, all the money that we rob
- We're gonna buy so much stuff that all the money that we rob is gonna be ours anyway
- I'm gonna buy a new identity dude
- Thank you
Just gonna check on my transactional log
Gavin, you're taking a picture? Are you surveilling the joint?
Don't take a picture of yourself, that's evidence. I'll have to blow you up
I'm not, I'm taking a picture of the shop
Alright
- Jesus Ryan
- Hello sir
