 
Anahita

Published by Akram Monfared Arya (Taraneh), Pilot, Author, Poet, and Artist

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2016 Akram Monfared Arya

ISBN 978-91-981818-1-4

Cover Artwork: Akram Monfared Arya

Cover Design: Multitech Graphics Inc.

Drawing: Faryal Shakibi

Translation from Swedish to English: Mina Boyne

Swedish Edition Copyright 2007 Akram Monfared Arya published in Sweden

English Edition Copyright 2008 Akram Monfared Arya published in Canada

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

Thank you for downloading this ebook. This book remains the copyrighted property of the author.

Inspired by true events

### To my family

### Specially my son, Ali

### Thanks for the collaboration, dear Son.

My sorrow

If you knew my grief.

Have you already lost your sympathy?

For decades, I had it.

Except patience, not much can be done.

Only God knows why this is the case for me.

What sin have I committed that I deserve this? For this has made my life dark.

And my destiny has been impacted.

Nothing can be done but persevere, and hope for improvement and resolve.

From my book _Sky has no limits_ (2005)

Chapter 1

Anahita was born in a middle class family. She was a sweet, little girl who had come into a cruel world. Her father was a tall man who was one hundred and seventy centimeters long and weighed ninety-two kilograms. He was a pensioner who had, in his young days, skipped high school and got a series of odd jobs here and there. As he got older, he got a job as a salesman at a manufacturing company where he continued working for thirty-five years before taking his retirement. His name was Chingiz, a name that came to be associated with disgrace and shame for his family as he got older.

Chingiz had big brown eyes, dark brown hair, large and thick eyebrows, big and fleshy nose with large nostrils through which he could spurt out fire like a dragon, prominent lips, and yellow teeth caused by chain-smoking. He also had a short and thick neck.

His shirt size was large but because of his neck size he had to wear extra large shirts, or he could not button up the collar on his shirts.

A rather out of the ordinary feature of Chingiz's physical appearance was his big feet. His shoe size was forty-seven for a man who was a hundred-and-seventy centimeters long and that was rather awkward.

Chingiz was an aggressive and controlling man, negative traits that might have come about as a result of his harsh and pathetic upbringing. He was a teenager when he had lost his father at which point, he was left with the heavy burden of providing for his family and supporting them.

His few, pitiful relatives did not make things easier on him either. Chingiz's uncle, Hassan, was an alcoholic and a philanderer. Everyone in the family knew about Hassan's indiscretions with the prostitutes.

The death of Chingiz's father had brought him closer to his uncle, Hassan. Chingiz's mother, Effat, was too old and too sick to stop Chingiz from making wrong choices in life including his close relationship and attachment to Hassan. There was nothing she could do to put an end to the diabolical alliance that was forged between Chingiz and Hassan. Under his uncle's influence, Chingiz had come into contact with people from all walks of life. Following his uncle's footsteps, Chingiz also frequented brothels from an early age, the ramifications of which led to Chingiz's unsavory practices in life.

Thanks to his uncle, Chingiz had become somewhat of an alcohol abuser. However, he had to try to control his drinking for the sake of his younger brother and sister, both of whom he had to support. To abstain from drinking was a hard pill to swallow for Chingiz, but so long as he could still carry on his affairs with the prostitutes, he could live with restricting himself in his alcohol consumption.

Life could not have been easy for Chingiz. At the age of twenty, he had not only gone without a father figure for quite some time, but on top of everything else, he lost his mother, Effat, as well.

His mother had more than likely died of a shock brought about by the fact that his eldest son had made an illegitimate child with a middle-aged prostitute.

This was what fate had in store for Effat that is, to get to see her first grandchild be born out of wedlock and by a middle-aged prostitute.

Hardly anything mattered to Chingiz though. For him, the only things in life that mattered the most were food, women, fun and leisure.

However, with the mother's passing, Chingiz's uncle, Hassan, became the legal guardian of Chingiz's minor siblings; something that made only Chingiz delighted and not his siblings. But his brother and his sister had no say in the matter. They had simply become the victims of the circumstances.

Chingiz, who now had a boy, had no plans to take responsibility for that little innocent creature who had the misfortune of ending up in such family. Chingiz showed up at the brothel only when the baby was being delivered and he raced out of there as soon as the baby was born. The little boy was named Sam after his grandfather.

Chingiz did not enjoy getting attached to anything or anyone when it did not suit him and had no desire to be tied down by any sense of responsibility. He loved his freedom. His egocentricity was very much one of his many prominent negative traits.

His lust and indiscretions had brought him nothing but shame and scandals. The fact that Chingiz grew up without a father figure in his own life had made him oblivious as to the significance of fatherly love and guidance in a child's life hence, rendering him incapable of loving others.

As fate had it, Chingiz was to be raised by his uncle; a man whose life comprised of nothing more than drinking and promiscuity.

In addition to being a lousy father, Chingiz was a lousy lover. Sex for him meant self-gratification and nothing else. He could not understand the difference between sex and love, lust and romance; something that came to haunt him later on in his life. He was a man whose life lacked meaning, direction or anything positive for that matter. He worked like a horse and lived a boorish life; that was all that Chingiz was about.

He was not a popular person among his colleagues either. He was vulgar and overbearing. Maybe deep down inside, he was a kind and decent man but that softer side of him never got to manifest itself, perhaps because of the way he was brought up by his uncle.

At the age of twenty-five, Chingiz was forced into marriage with a girl his own age. He did not want to get married at all, but he had no choice since he had already slept with her and had got her pregnant.

The girl's name was Kobra. Kobra was a young, thin, and unattractive girl with short, dark, curly hair.

Kobra was a cruel and wicked person who dabbled in sorcery and witchcraft. A girl with a dark soul, demonic thoughts, and malicious intents.

To be forced into marriage was a death sentence for Chingiz. It meant that he would no longer be free to do what he wants particularly at a time when he was also stuck raising Sam whose mother married a wealthy client of hers and left the brothel.

Poor Sam had to grow up with his mean stepmother and his irresponsible father.

As a child, Sam could feel Kobra's hatred in all things and at all times. Growing up, he was saddled by many chores around the house. He had to wash, scrub, dust, do the shopping and all in all, he had to toil away at home like a servant to Kobra.

Chingiz, who did not care about either Sam or Kobra, did not wait too long before going back to the brothels.

Chingiz had an awful personality, no manners, and a stinking attitude when it came to social interactions. He had no respect for anyone or anything. All he cared about was his own pleasure.

In spite of all this, Kobra wanted to hold on to Chingiz in any way she could. After all, Chingiz was her only means of financial support.

Kobra was a shrewd and ruthless woman, who got even worse in the course of living with Chingiz. Perhaps, she had no chance of surviving Chingiz if she had not been as devious as she was.

After years of living with Chingiz, Kobra had come to the conclusion that there was no hope for life ever getting better with Chingiz. Not even having children had made Chingiz settle down. Due to his extra-marital affairs, Chingiz often suffered from some sort of venereal disease which he kept passing on to Kobra. Ultimately, Kobra's worst nightmare came true when she found out that she had cervical cancer. She had to undergo a full hysterectomy, which meant that she could not have any more children.

At the time, Kobra had two biological children and a stepchild. She had a son called Saaid, a daughter named Sara, and of course her stepson, Sam. She loved her son and daughter but she absolutely hated her stepson.

For her, Sam was a constant reminder of Chingiz's dark side. Sam was nothing but a disgrace to her and yet, she was the one stuck with raising him.

Saaid and Sara were the apples of her eyes. They had it really good. Whatever Chingiz earned, Kobra got to spend on Saaid and Sara. But Sam had to fend for himself.

As early as the age of thirteen, Sam was forced to find a job, which he did. He got a job selling fruits in the bazaar and had to hand over his earnings to Kobra.

So, Kobra had two sources of income: Chingiz and Sam.

Kobra belonged to a working class family. They were a close-knit family and they watched each other's back no matter what. Therefore, Kobra could rely on her family and count on their support to step in if and when required. It was, after all, thanks to her family's intervention that Chingiz was forced into marrying her after sleeping with her.

It was Chingiz's relentless pursuit of women that had got him ultimately entangled in the web of marriage. But one thing he did not have to worry about was seeing Kobra's family after marriage since they did not want to be around someone who had a big mouth and a nasty attitude.

Ever since Kobra's hysterectomy, Chingiz had started to constantly nag her about it and claim that she could not satisfy him any more as a result of her surgery.

Kobra had got severe infection after surgery so making love for her was absolutely out of the question. As such, Kobra tried to hold on to Chingiz by means of despicable and immoral acts such as, hiring domestic help and allowing Chingiz to flirt with them and have fun. She also resorted to witchcraft, in which she believed strongly, in the hopes of keeping him under her spell and stopping him from thinking about a new marriage.

But all her efforts were in vain. All she could do was just to delay the inevitable. Delay the process as much for Chingiz as for some poor girl who was going to have the misfortune of falling into Chingiz's hands.

The years came and went. Sam, Saaid, and Sara were well into their adulthood. The age difference was not much between Saaid, Sara, and Sam who was a thirty-year-old man now. Sam, who had not got the chance to do much schooling as a kid, had taken control of his life once he had become of age and had begun working during the day and studying in the evenings.

Although Kobra had been cruel to Sam and those around him had not been any better to him either, Sam got to manage himself well in his adult life.

But Kobra's malevolence extended well beyond enslaving Sam in his childhood. Her greatest cruelty was the life-long pain that she inflicted on him when she, unbeknown to him, got him sterilized.

Sam had no way of knowing about this until after his marriage when he began to wonder why his wife could not become pregnant. Sam married at the age of thirty-one.

Sam was employed as a civil servant working at the municipality. He also succeeded in completing his studies and getting a degree at the age of forty. His wife was a hairdresser. He had made a much better life for himself than what his father, Chingiz, had ever given him.

Sam tried to break contact with his father on several occasions. But he had no one else except him until he got married.

Sam was a sensitive man who missed his mother very much and wished he had been closer to his father. He could not have any children of his own to whom he could give all his fatherly love and he had no real parents. The only one he had was his wife. He cherished his wife and highly valued his marriage.

To find peace in life, Sam adopted a girl from a foster home. He loved her like she was his own. He did everything to give his wife and their child a good and decent life, unlike the one he had experienced for so many years during his childhood.

Chingiz's life went on as normal without any real meaning or significance.

Kobra had managed to raise her children and support them until they finished their schooling and got their lives together. Kobra had aged prematurely because of Chingiz. She and Chingiz were almost the same age.

Now Chingiz was sixty-five years old, but he was still just as bad as when he was a young man.
Chapter 2

Who was Chingiz? What had caused him to become the person he was?

Chingiz came originally from a wealthy family. But a family who lacked real structure. Chingiz's father, Karim, married Effat when he was sixty years old. He was an entrepreneur who earned his living by lending money to others. More or less, as a private lender, people got loans from him by putting up their properties as collaterals.

Chingiz's mother, Effat, was much younger than his father. The age difference between them was more than forty-five years. So Effat was fifteen when she married Chingiz's father Karim. Karim died of a sudden illness when Chingiz was only fourteen years old. Chingiz's sister, Laila, got married at fifteen just like her mother, and she died in an accident a few years later. Parviz, Chingiz's brother, left home after high school in the hopes of finding happiness somewhere else, something that Chingiz failed to do. Parviz broke all contacts with Chingiz since then.

Chingiz could already be considered an orphan in his teens. Effat was too young to raise her children. Effat's brother, who was eight years older, was the only one she had who could take care of them.

Nobody saw a nickel of all that money that Chingiz's father lent out to people. His children were so young that they could not take any actions to recover their father's fortune. All they got as their inheritance was the house they lived in with all its furniture and a small amount of cash.

It seemed as if stupidity was hereditary within that family.

Who could have been stupid enough to lend money out without writing a real and formal contract? Well as it turned out later, contracts had been drawn up at the time, but no one knew where they were kept. Many years later, all the documents were ultimately found—thanks to Parviz's persistence—but at that point, they were considered obsolete and outdated.

The contracts were no longer valid and could not be used to recuperate what once belonged to a few small children and a young mother.

Chingiz and Kobra were alone now. Their children had left and had their own lives to live. Even Sam had managed to get on with his life and make a good life for himself.

There was, however, no change in Chingiz. He was just as irresponsible and immature as ever, acting as if he was sixteen years old even though he was sixty-five. He had retired from work a few years back. But he was so accustomed to working that he could not sit idle. He could not be without a job as much as he could not be without a woman.

Tired of sitting at home and watching the world go by, one day, Chingiz goes and gets himself a job in the bazaar as a salesman in a friend's store.

All the while, Kobra had been feeling pretty confident that Chingiz was no longer looking to get re-married. She had assumed that Chingiz was too old to even imagine getting married any more. Kobra is well aware of Chingiz's insatiable appetite for women. She can also turn a blind eye on the affairs he has with other women, but what she cannot accept is him committing to someone else and getting married.

But history tends to repeat itself.

Chingiz starts working in the bazaar. The bazaar is a busy place where many come and go. A place where people come to buy anything and everything. And that also happens to be where he was to meet his new victim that is, his second official wife.
Chapter 3

On a beautiful summer day, a young fifteen-year-old girl goes out shopping. She is a hundred and sixty five centimeters long with long, light-brown hair, and light-brown eyes. She is wearing a red dress with floral pattern consisting of small yellow and white flowers and a pair of white shoes. She is looking to buy a new pair of shoes. She lives near the bazaar where fate has set up its trap for her.

Her name is Ziba.

Ziba's father, Akbar, is a carpenter. Her mother, Homa, is a simple housewife. Ziba lives with her parents, grandmother, and her little brother.

Ziba comes from a decent family. She has high moral values and a simple outlook on life. She has recently finished grade nine with good results. She enjoys the same things as other girls her age would that is, getting together with friends, developing closer relationship with her mother, having crushes on boys, and all the other things that a teenage girl would normally find interesting at that age.

Walking passed by the store, where Chingiz works, Ziba sees a pair of shoes that she thinks are adorable. So, she decides to go in to take a better look at them and to try them on. As soon as Ziba walks into the store and Chingiz lays eyes on her, something happens. Just like a teenage kid, Chingiz falls in love with her. He does not care that there is a big age difference between them. He is not bothered by the fact that she is so young that she could be his grandchild. No, none of that seem to matter; he falls for her.

Ziba has no idea what fate has in store for her. She just buys the pair of shoes she wanted and leaves the store just as quickly as she came in. But Chingiz, who has got a crush on her, leaves the store to his colleague and follows Ziba. He tries to strike a conversation with her, be funny and wise. But obviously, she is not at all interested in him. That does not stop Chingiz from following her home anyway. Ziba says nothing to her parents about Chingiz and the fact that he followed her all the way home. She does not want to get into any trouble specially, when she had nothing to do with it.

In fact, Ziba was in love with one of her classmates, Saman. Ziba had her dreams about getting married to Saman and her life with him. She had been in love with Saman for some time.

However, fate had no intentions of letting Ziba and Saman get married. It was not meant for them to be together.

In his pursuit, Chingiz was persistent and relentless. He would not stop at anything until he got what he wanted. He was also not scared or worried about what others might say or think about him. It is not surprising then that he had the audacity to come visit Ziba's family in order to persuade them to let their daughter marry him.

Ziba's father was outraged and could not believe that an old man would dare come and propose marriage to such a young girl.

But no one can fight his or her destiny.

One day, out of the blue, Ziba receives a letter from Saman stating that his family has decided to relocate to another city and considering the distance, he would no longer be able to see her. He goes on in his letter to make a lot of excuses about how he would not have the time to stay in touch with her since he would have to help out his father with his business and he would have to focus on doing better at school and so forth. In a round about way, Saman was letting her know that it was over between them.

Crushed, Ziba tosses the letter aside and never mentions Saman's name again.

To retaliate and get revenge from Saman, however, Ziba decides to marry her pathetic admirer.

Yes, she is willing to ruin her life for the sake of getting revenge, if that can be called revenge. To get revenge from whom? Herself? How silly can one be?

In the meanwhile, Chingiz has still not given up and has kept hounding Ziba's family. Kobra, on the other hand, has no idea what Chingiz has been up to. She also could have never, in her wildest dreams, imagined that Chingiz would fall in love with a teenager. Chingiz, who had always left Kobra in the dark about everything, was surely not about to tell her about his encounter with Ziba either. Insofar as Kobra was concerned then, Chingiz was busy having his usual, in other words, casual affairs and nothing more.

Kobra is not bothered by Chingiz's despicable affairs since those do not pose any real threat to her marriage. Kobra and Chingiz had long ceased being intimate. So, Kobra is not a bit concerned about his indiscretions. She is just happy that, officially, Chingiz is hers even if that is only on paper.

Ziba starts hinting to her father that she is interested in marrying Chingiz. She cannot come out straight and says it for then, the father would burst into a fury. So for now, Ziba sneaks out to meet Chingiz at his workplace.

Ziba is too young and too inexperienced to realize what she is doing to her own life.

During her visits with Chingiz, she convinces him to try harder to get her family's blessing for their marriage. Ziba cannot go out with Chingiz, but she can go to the bazaar and visit him at work. They do not get to know each other that much during those far and few between occasions that they meet. But Chingiz has already made headways. Ironically, when one is determined to wreck his or her own life, fate seals the deal with bringing about all kinds of misfortune and calamity thus, paving the way in that regard.

Ziba's grandmother suffers a heart attack and dies suddenly while Ziba's father gets laid off and becomes unemployed. Here is a family who live a modest life in a flat, which is a rental unit and not their own, without any savings and now facing a difficult financial situation.

How will they pay their rent? How will the funeral costs be paid? How will they make ends meet? How . . . ? And a host of other problems that they have to grapple with as a result of their dire financial situation.

The first thing Ziba's family does is to sell their gold and a few of their carpets, while the father desperately searches for a job. He is a carpenter who has no other skills, no education, and to top it off, he is now also old and worn out.

Ziba's father never had a permanent, long-term job. Throughout his life, he had worked here and there on short-term, casual basis. Thus, he has no pension, no savings, and no recourse.

While Ziba's family is struggling to make the ends meet, Chingiz shows up over and over in their lives. During one of his many appearances at Ziba's home, Chingiz gets wind of their economic situation. This is good news for him. This gives him an upper hand. Now he is no longer just someone with a marriage proposal but someone who can play the role of a guardian angel. He could lure them with a lot of promises to get what he wants.

So, Chingiz offers to help out Ziba's family. But because he does not have a lot of savings, he cannot provide much in terms of financial help. What he could instead offer is a promise to Ziba's father to find him a job through speaking with his colleagues.

It was tough times for Ziba and her family. For Ziba, it seemed that all the hardship in the world had hit them at once. On one hand, Ziba felt deserted by the love of her life and on the other, her family was on the brinks of bankruptcy.

Chingiz now had a golden opportunity to strike. The road was clear. It was all coming together nicely for him.

As Kobra was not able to perform her conjugal duty due to her illness, which was passed on to her by Chingiz, Chingiz could enter into another marriage without getting permission from Kobra and with the full backing of the law and therefore, have two wives.

So nothing could stop him from committing such an unjust act. An act that would only benefit him. An act that would ruin the life of a young teenager.

Perhaps going through puberty, Ziba could not think straight to realize that she was about to delve into the depth of hell.

Ziba's father, who had been dealt a rotten hand in life, is tempted by Chingiz's cunning and disingenuous offers and allows his daughter to enter into a terrible marriage out of pure desperation. Ziba's mother does not have much to say about her daughter's marriage since in their household, it is Ziba's father who makes all the decisions for everything.

As Ziba has consented to getting married, there are no more obstacles on the way to hinder them from getting engaged and to set a date for their wedding ceremony.

Chingiz buys a cheap engagement ring. One afternoon, he drops by Ziba's family unexpectedly and puts the ring on Ziba's finger. The engagement takes place in the absence of any relatives on either side and without any special ceremony.

Ziba does not want to keep the engagement a secret. She wants revenge on her "former" sweetheart Saman. Therefore she wears her engagement ring at all times. She goes on showing off her cheap, simple ring to friends and family.

When one's life is meant to be destroyed, even the universe seems to be unwilling to step in and prevent it.

During the short one-month engagement period, Chingiz is an angel. He is happy and rejuvenated. They go out to movies and restaurants. He helps the family with their rent and other matters. He is courteous and behaves like a gentleman.

So far, neither Ziba's family nor Kobra know about each other's existence.

No, Chingiz never told Ziba that he was married. He also kept Kobra in the dark about Ziba and his plans to marry her.

Everything is hunky-dory for Chingiz. Nothing worries him. He has no conscience to feel guilt or remorse. There is only one thing he is concerned with and that is his personal pleasure, period.

In effect, Ziba knows nothing about Chingiz. He is merely her means of getting revenge, although in this case it is her who is the real casualty, the one whose future is destroyed.

Engagement period goes by fast and the wedding day arrives. Chingiz manages to convince Ziba's family to have a private ceremony at home instead of having a big wedding.

Since Ziba's father is not proud of the marriage and he would rather keep it as low key as possible, only the closest relatives get invited to that lovely ceremony.

Meanwhile, Chingiz rents a one-room studio and furnishes it with only the bare minimum necessities for starting a new life with her young bride Ziba.

After the simple wedding ceremony is over, Ziba, the willful teenager, leaves her family's place and goes to her new, so- called home.

During the wedding reception, Chingiz drinks quite a bit in order to calm his nerves and relax. He is surely, not a young man anymore but he has a hard time accepting that; as are evident from his affairs, excessive drinking, and his choice of bride. Poor Ziba! The alcohol turns out to be of no help to Chingiz later on that night. The wedding night becomes more of a nightmare for her than anything else. Chingiz is unable to make love to her. And since Chingiz is anything but decent, he puts the blame squarely on Ziba for his own shortcoming. In his rampage, he even goes as far as accusing her to not having been a virgin and to have had sex before.

Ziba sobs like a scared, little child. She is confounded. Not only is she offended by Chingiz's harsh accusations but she is also flabbergasted at getting slapped in the face when she tries to talk back. In a small one-room flat, Ziba sits on the floor and cries out of despair.

Right off the bat, from the very first night of living under the same roof with Chingiz, she wants out. But she has no way out. She cannot go back to her parents. Considering their bad financial state, they cannot support her. After all, they were already going through financial difficulties sometime before she even got married.

Chingiz, who is drunk that night, falls asleep after a while. Ziba does not close her eyes for a minute that night. She keeps thinking about everything. About the life she had before and the one she has now. She thinks that no matter how pathetic her life might have been before, at least, she had never got a beating from anyone. But now that is no longer the case. She wonders how she can cope to co-exist with someone like Chingiz. A co-existence that has started to take a horrible turn right from the beginning.

The next morning Chingiz takes Ziba to a midwife for medical examination to see if she is virgin or not. The midwife mistakes Chingiz for Ziba's father who wants to check and make sure his daughter is a virgin before getting married. Chingiz does not reveal his true identity and his relationship with Ziba and carries on pretending to be her father. The midwife assures him that Ziba is innocent and there are no reasons to worry.

Chingiz goes to work after dropping Ziba off at home. He leaves without saying much to Ziba. He is still angry and upset. One can see that in his face, even from a distance.

Ziba, who has not been able to sleep all night, dares not to say or ask anything.

Chingiz, who did not go home to Kobra the night before, is not even the least bit worried. He has in the past stayed out all night, some time even couple of nights on a row, with his buddies in brothels; something that Kobra is quite accustomed to. So it is rather normal for Kobra not to see Chingiz for a day or two, and so long as she gets her monthly allowance on time, she is fine.

Ziba's mother drops by at Ziba's at lunchtime. She asks her how the first day of her married life has been like. Ziba hardly says anything about what had transpired the night before. She finds it humiliating to talk about what had happened to her. She also knows that her family is in no position to help her out so she does not see any point in sharing her problem with her mother. After all, it was she who wanted to get married. She remembers how her parents had asked her many times whether she was sure about what she wanted.

It is true that her family was going through a hard time financially with which they believed Chingiz could help, but they never forced Ziba to marry Chingiz.

Chingiz had made promises to Ziba's father that he would find him a job and a place to live. Chingiz had deceived them into thinking that he was financially well off. His lies were so convincing that her family completely fell for them.

Ziba's mother notices nothing and Ziba says nothing either. The mother stays a few hours and leaves in the afternoon. Chingiz comes home late at night. Ziba, who was sitting at the little dining table in the kitchen, stands up anxiously with her head down and greets him.

Chingiz barely responds.

What a life and what a living Chingiz has provided for his new bride.

A one-room flat of fifty square meters with a small kitchenette located on the ground floor of a three-story building.

Stepping into the house, one could cover the entire house in pretty much five steps. As soon as one opens the white door and steps into the apartment, one is in both the living room and the bedroom since the bed is on the left side of the room and the kitchen nook on the right. Through the kitchen nook, one gets to the tiny bathroom and shower.

Walls, doors, windows and dressers are all painted in white. The flat has black vinyl flooring all throughout, the same color as Chingiz's heart.

To the right of the kitchen there is a small white dining table with two white chairs on each side. The bed, which for Ziba has felt like a coffin from the very first night, is white with white sheets. A small radio is placed on the window ledge. Chingiz had told Ziba's father that there was no need for Ziba to bring anything with her that is, dowry to their new home. According to Chingiz, he already had everything they needed and anything else they wanted he could acquire himself.

The same misery that Kobra had to live with now started to engulf Ziba as well.

She had already got the first bitter experience of her life on the very first day of them living together. What would she do now? Who could she blame for such grave mistake that had been made?

No one, absolutely no one. She only had herself to blame. She got married out of vengeance and now, she has to live with the consequences of that. Ziba could be so stubborn and so thick at times that no one could stop her from destroying her own life.

Chingiz returns home from work and does not say much.

He asks about dinner and fortunately, Ziba, who had thought about it, had prepared a simple meal.

She sets the table while Chingiz reads his newspaper. At the table, Chingiz shovels the food in his mouth without saying anything or looking at Ziba. After dinner, Chingiz seems to be in a better mood. He is full and seems content. Since he is now in the mood for making love, he tries to soften up a bit. Ziba, who thinks she has to please Chingiz, is just glad that he is no longer mad at her. Although Ziba had not done anything wrong, she takes responsibility for what had happened the night before.

The second night goes well, but only for Chingiz. He satisfies himself with his young bride. He enjoys every second while Ziba tries hard to imagine making love to a man who is loving and affectionate.

Chingiz is anything but affectionate or even considerate for that matter. He does not care how horrible of an experience Ziba may be going through and how badly it could impact her. He is rough and leaves Ziba in pain and horror.

Chingiz had done the same thing to Kobra. This was nothing new. Chingiz was an animal in a human body.

That night Ziba goes through a horrible ordeal. She finds making love to be a terrifying concept. Physical intimacy becomes something ghastly for her.

Chingiz satisfies himself and then falls asleep without any regard for his teenage wife.

The relationship seems doomed since there are too many things wrong with it. First, there is the age difference between Chingiz and Ziba. Then, it is Chingiz's horrible and stinking attitude. Then, it is his alcohol addiction, indiscretions, and dark past. And worst of all is Chingiz's abusive behavior be it, verbal, physical, emotional, or sexual.

Ziba has no one to turn to. She has no shoulders to lean on and to cry on. She feels alone and abandoned in the hands of an evil man, a man whom she chose for herself. While it may be true that she did consent to the marriage, she was really not the only one at fault for the way her life got wrecked. After all, what happened to the parents' responsibility and parental oversight? It would have been impossible for a minor like Ziba to get married without the blessing and permission of her parents.

Ziba acted irrationally and made a huge mistake out of pure stupidity, but why did her parents allow her to go through an appalling and dreadful marriage! Well, there is a reason for everything.

Ziba's father was penniless. He was unemployed. He had a family to feed. He became desperate and sold as much of their belonging as he could in order to make ends meet. He had no savings. He was extremely distressed. Ziba's mother was not much of a help or support to the family either. She was a simple housewife without much talent. An illiterate woman who got married for the sake of having a provider. She was docile and gullible. She was a cold-hearted woman who did not allow emotions take over because she could not afford them. Letting emotions guide one's life can be a dangerous thing apparently. She was painfully aware of her inferiorities in life. That is why she leaned on her husband all the time and let him make decisions for everything. In addition, it is not like she had a good life let alone a luxurious one herself so, why in the world should she care if her children didn't have that either?

Chingiz had all the luck in the world when he happened to run into this family. How many families are there with hopeless parents who do not think about anything other than their own gain? That was exactly what went on when they allowed their daughter to go through with that sham wedding. Chingiz wanted neither a large dowry nor a big wedding. He did not want those things so that the family would not ask him for the customary nuptial money for their daughter. As such, Chingiz could get away with incurring the normal expenses associated with getting married and having a wedding.

A few days have passed and Chingiz has no choice but to drop by and see Kobra. It is one thing to be gone for a day or two, but he cannot be gone for a few days on a row for no good reason. Since Chingiz has no conscience or compassion, he tells Ziba, in a nonchalant fashion, that he has another wife and that he has to spend a few days at her place every week.

Now that he is confident that Ziba is his and nothing can change that, he is not afraid of divulging the truth about his other wife. The odds are certainly in his favor.

Chingiz is not even man enough to just come out and tell her straight out. Instead, he picks a fight with her first at which point, he blames her for a whole bunch of stuff like not satisfying him, deceiving him, taking advantage of him and so forth. And then, he mentions his first wife by saying how much he has come to appreciate what an angel Kobra, his first wife, is!

Ziba, who stands at the edge of the bed crying like a baby, does not even hear what Chingiz says at first.

To get her attention, Chingiz repeats his statement about his first wife, Kobra.

Suddenly Ziba quiets down. She sighs, takes a deep breath and with a hoarse voice from crying she asks Chingiz "what did you say?"

Chingiz remains silent for a few seconds.

Ziba is not crying any longer. She is not quite sure if she heard him correctly or not. She waits for an answer.

Chingiz reaches over, grabs his jacket, and says:

-You heard me, I said compared to a loser like you and your pathetic family, Kobra is an angel that God has spared me all these years.

Ziba is dumbfounded. What in the world is going on?

Is this an illusion or is this yet, another dose of the bitter reality that Ziba must swallow? She wants nothing more than for the nightmare to be over and for her to go back to the life she had before Chingiz.

Just to be sure that he has got his point across, Chingiz repeats himself yet another time:

\- I said my first wife is worth gold.

Now Ziba is sure that what she heard was right. She thinks to herself: First wife! Which wife? Where is she? Is it not enough that I have to share my life with a lunatic? Is it not enough that I have to put up with a lousy married life? I guess not!

Ziba sits on the edge of the bed. She is deep in her own thoughts. What should she say? What is there to say? Should she pack her bags and go back to her pathetic parents or should she ask for divorce and end up prostituting herself?

What is a woman in her situation supposed to do in a society that does not have the slightest regard or compassion for divorced women? A society where there is no support either financially or emotionally for women in general.

Women are in one way or another an oppressed faction in all societies. It is a fact that women are physically weaker than men but this does not mean that they are not as skilful or intelligent as men or in many cases even better.

While Ziba grapples with the problems in her life, Chingiz sits quietly at the table waiting for Ziba's next move. It is like a game of chess, one makes a move and waits for the opponent's next move. Each step must be carefully thought out before moving the pieces on the chessboard.

Nonetheless, Chingiz feels relieved. The burden of when and how the secret about his first wife would come out is lifted. He thinks that now is the time to let it sink in and move on.

Ziba has nothing to say. Maybe once she has become tougher and more mature by all the hardship that fate puts her through, she could say what is on her mind. She stretches her legs and gets up without saying a word to Chingiz.

Chingiz leaves and does not return home that night.

It is not easy to be married. It is like the lottery. Some are lucky and some are not. But what is luck? Is it fate? Is it destiny? What is it? Nobody knows, but as soon as something good or evil happens, people call it good luck or bad luck.

Who knows what type of a person one ends up marrying. Some say that there has to be a personal chemistry between two people. Others believe that a couple should go out together and get to know each other before they move in together. But would any of these be enough?

No, of course not. To live with another person means that there are two minds that make decisions and not just one. So conflicts, clashes, and contradictions become normal concepts in a married life, as are commonalities, compromises, and love.

However the degree of antagonism and conflict varies from one case to another. For some, it is possible to resolve their issues in a calm and civil manner and move on; for others, it will be one of life's insurmountable tasks which cannot be overcome hence, separation of couples who are incompatible.
Chapter 4

It is ten o'clock the next morning. Ziba opens her eyes. At first she does not recognize her surroundings for a few seconds. Her memory has blocked all that took place before she fell asleep. She quickly sits up on the edge of the bed to take a closer look at where she is. Now she remembers. She is at home. She fell asleep after an argument with Chingiz. But where is Chingiz? That's right; the bastard is out, certainly at his first wife's. Everything becomes crystal clear for her now. She thinks to herself about what might happen next. Perhaps Chingiz will file for divorce or he may move back in with his first wife. Oh God! What have I done? What kind of a life have I chosen for myself? I am a prisoner for the rest of my life.

Ziba is surprised that Chingiz had not said anything about his first wife before they got married. As unhappy as Ziba is with her wrong choice of husband, she at least had thought that she was the only wife Chingiz had. Now the question is who the first "lucky" woman is that Chingiz was praising the night before. Does she have it better than I? Ziba thinks out loud. Why did things turn out the way they did? What have I done? Ziba asks herself.

The door opens up. Chingiz comes in. He does not seem angry or mad any longer. He has something in his hands. Ziba gets out of the bed. She is disappointed, hurt, saddened and angry, but she hardly dares speak out. She says hello softly.

\- Hello, Chingiz responds cheerfully.

Chingiz comes closer, stretches out a package that he is holding in his hands and says:

\- Oh dear Ziba, I have bought this for you.

Ziba does not know what to say. She is afraid of getting smacked by Chingiz if she opens up her mouth. She finds it hard to cope with being battered and humiliated. Yet, she must find out who the other woman is.

\- What is it? Ziba asks with trembling voice.

\- Open it and you'll see, Chingiz responds with a big smile.

Chingiz has bought her a dress. A simple, red dress without any sophisticated style or design. Chingiz sits down, takes a cigarette out of his pocket and lights up. He asks for lunch as if it is Ziba's intrinsic duty to have prepared lunch for Sir Chingiz. Ziba states that she will make something quickly.

Surely it was no gourmet food. Omelet with white bread and a glass of water. After lunch, Chingiz wants to make love to her.

Regardless of what Ziba wants or how she feels, Chingiz always get his way.

Ziba has not even had a chance to take a shower. As always, Chingiz satisfies himself and goes to sleep.

For Ziba, it feels as if she has been hit by a bus each time Chingiz crawls on top of her like an animal. The emotionally and physically painful experience brings Ziba to tears. The feeling of pain stops only after her ravaged body becomes numb.

There is nothing pleasant or delightful in what is called sex for Ziba. All she has experienced in that regard have been pain and nauseating sensation.

That day, there were no more talks about Chingiz's other or rather first wife. But the subject was bound to come up at some point again. Neither Ziba nor Chingiz were done with the issue. They were both just waiting for the right time to take it up again.

Ziba wanted to believe that even if Chingiz had been married before, he must have surely divorced his first wife before he proposed to her. It seemed as if Ziba had not really understood how bizarre the situation was. She knew nothing about Chingiz, but she was not alone in that. None of her family members knew much about Chingiz either.

Given that Chingiz was out so often and he had so many contacts, it was impossible for anyone to figure out what he was up to.

Ziba is a bright and energetic girl who has not had a chance yet to show how capable and competent she is. In addition, she is too young to fight for her rights and to stand up on her own feet.

A week after Chingiz had confessed one of his sins to her, the one about his first wife, Ziba could not hold back any longer. One night during dinner, she gathers up all her courage and asks Chingiz:

\- Who was your first wife?

Chingiz, who is about to slurp his soup, chokes on a piece of green bean and starts coughing. He is caught off guard. Ziba panics and pours a glass of water for him. Chingiz turns red in the face because of the cough. The water helps Chingiz out, and now Ziba waits in fear for his reaction toward her, afraid of getting assaulted by Chingiz either physically or verbally.

But, what the heck! I have to ask him about it some time, Ziba thinks to herself.

\- Wow, that was a close call! Chingiz says.

There is silence in the room for a few minutes. Ziba is waiting for a response but it shows in her face that she is scared. Afraid that Chingiz will get annoyed and start fighting with her again. Afraid of getting beaten up by him.

Due to Chingiz's temper, Ziba has lost any self-esteem that she might have had to the point that she does not even recognize herself.

In the meanwhile, Chingiz wonders what he should say. Where should he start and how much he should reveal?

This is no easy task for Chingiz. But this is something he should have thought of before ruining a teenager's life.

\- Well, you know, I have been married . . . I mean I have been married to another woman for a long time, Chingiz says.

Ziba does not believe her ears. She sits still without the slightest movement in her body. Not even her eyelids move.

Chingiz, who does not tend to be shy or gentle and is rather known for his rudeness and vulgarity, remains calm and collected in order to portray himself as a reasonable man.

He tries to twist the facts in order to make himself look like a good guy so he says:

\- You know, I had to marry a wicked girl because of my parents and relatives.

Chingiz does not get to continue since he is interrupted by Ziba, who cuts him off and asks:

\- What's her name? Where is she now?

\- Yes, she um . . . her name is Kobra, responds Chingiz hesitantly as if he wants to avoid the issue and forget about it altogether.

Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut and not divulge anything about Kobra in the first place.

\- Where is she? Ziba asks in a low and soft voice so as not to awaken the beast in Chingiz. She is hoping to get a straightforward answer from Chingiz now that he appears to be somewhat willing to answer.

Chingiz does not really know how things will turn out if he answers Ziba's questions honestly. He is not afraid of her, but he does not want her to hate him. He has found an angel in his life and somehow he has got to hold on to her. He knows he cannot keep her if he reveals everything about himself and his dark past.

But what is done is done. He has already opened up the Pandora's box, and now he must the mess he has created one way or another. For him, the best thing to do is to go back to his usual harsh and demanding self.

So, Chingiz pulls himself together and with a more assertive voice replies:

\- She is alive if that is what you want to know. She and I have been married for many years, but we stopped being intimate a long time ago. She is ill and cannot satisfy my needs. Kobra has sacrificed her life for me and I am grateful to her.

Ziba sits still and listens carefully to every word that comes out of Chingiz's mouth. She does not know what to say since there is something that does not make sense. First, Kobra is allegedly evil and then she becomes the angel to whom Chingiz is forever grateful.

Who is this woman called Kobra, good or evil?

Now Ziba thinks to herself that Chingiz must have been married when he proposed to her.

Quite a man Chingiz is! With all his negative traits, Ziba has to wonder if it is at all possible that he has another side, perhaps a positive one?

Not likely. Absolutely impossible is the answer. So far things look grim for Ziba.

Chingiz goes back to eating his food as if everything is fine and dandy, and Ziba has got the answers she wanted.

Ziba assesses the situation. If she comes up with another question, things could get out of hand. The tone of voice in Chingiz's last answer was not calm or mild. So for now, it might be better to lay low until the next opportunity comes along.

After dinner, Ziba has to satisfy Chingiz's sexual needs as usual.

He treats Ziba in bed something awful. He does not know anything about romance. Even animals of different kind have some sort of ritual before copulating, but not Chingiz.

It is sickening. Ziba does not want anything to do with it. How can she stand up to Chingiz though? Should she dare refuse being intimate with him or should she give in and endure the misery? Not an easy decision to make under the circumstances.

Before sleeping with him, she thinks she might have a chance to get one or two more answers from him. Now that he is in need of something that Ziba can give him, she thinks why not use the chance even if it is a shot in the dark, it might work.

So she turns to Chingiz and says:

\- Before going to bed, I want to ask you about your wife, I mean your first . . .

Suddenly there comes a hard blow. It is Chingiz not allowing her to even finish her sentence and stopping her in her tracks with a slap in the face, so hard that she falls down.

The whole room seems to be spinning around her. The forceful slap came so suddenly and quickly that she did not know what it was that hit her. She is in a state of shock for several seconds. Lying on the floor with one hand on the side of her face that received the blow, Ziba feels the pain in her jaw and in one of her ears, the one that starts ringing.

\- Now you son of a b . . . You cannot cause me grief, or else I will kill you, says Chingiz furiously.

Ziba's face is red and hot to the touch. Blood rushes through her veins. She is so angry that she hyperventilates. She has been squashed like a bug on the floor. She feels humiliated and degraded. No one should be treated the way she is by her darling husband. Chingiz grabs his jacket and walks out of the apartment. It is a habit of his to leave, to run away, when he finds himself at fault or the situation overwhelming.

Ziba is tired of everything. She is tired of the life and the misery she has brought up on herself. She finds no way out of her miserable life other than perhaps suicide. It is not the first time she thinks about a stupid idea like that. Because of reading novels and love stories that end up in suicides, Ziba has thought about the idea in the past. Stories such as Romeo and Juliet have always touched Ziba. However in her case, she will not be sacrificing herself for the sake of her love, no; it would rather be her taking her life because of her horrible husband.

Chingiz is back before Ziba gets a chance to think things through.

Strange, Ziba thinks. How is it that Chingiz is back so fast? What is going on? She wonders.

\- Enough is enough. Lie on the bed! I am your husband and you do as I say! Chingiz orders her.

Ziba gets up and goes to the bathroom without saying a word. Chingiz takes off his clothes and crawls under the cover. He is waiting for her. He expects Ziba to please him unconditionally.

A few minutes pass by. Chingiz hears Ziba opening the cabinet door in the bathroom and then the sound of the water and nothing more. He shouts out after Ziba:

\- Useless woman, come on! Chingiz screams.

Ziba comes out. She has something in her hand. She sits at the dining table and puts something on the table. She cries. The tears come running down her cheeks like a small waterfall.

Chingiz gets up while swearing at everything and everyone.

\- What is it with you now? He shouts.

Chingiz comes closer when he notices a small, empty bottle that Ziba has put on the table. He takes it up. They are sleeping pills, which Chingiz occasionally took to help him sleep.

\- What the hell have you done? Are you crazy? Have you poured the whole bottle in your f...g stomach you moron? You want to commit suicide, you can do that but not here in my house you spoiled brat, Chingiz yells out.

Chingiz is not worried about Ziba's life. The only thing he is worried about is getting blamed for her death.

He gets dressed in a hurry, drags her out of the apartment, gets a taxi and takes her to the nearest medical clinic.

Meanwhile Ziba falls deeper into sleep. Chingiz tries to keep her awake by hitting her in the face.

At the clinic, Ziba's stomach has to be pumped.

She throws up everything in her stomach including the pills.

The doctor, who knows neither Chingiz nor Ziba, thinks Chingiz is Ziba's father and asks him:

\- Why has your daughter done this?

Chingiz, who does not want to say much, does not tell him that he is Ziba's husband. He pays for the visit and tells the doctor:

\- I do not want to talk about it. So if everything is OK now, we want to go home.

The doctor asks nothing more and let the father and daughter go home.

This time everything goes well and she is spared. She gets to go home a few hours later.

On the way back Chingiz keeps quiet. Ziba is still feeling sick and groggy.

They go to bed as soon as they are home. Another day of this happy life is over.
Chapter 5

The next day Ziba wakes up in the middle of the day with a massive headache.

Chingiz has gone to work. Initially, Ziba is disoriented and does not know where she is.

It takes a few seconds before she realizes where she is and what has happened.

\- It was a dumb thing to do, she says to herself.

She realizes that it was not worth trying to kill herself for someone who does not even feel sorry for how awful he has made her feel.

Ziba remembers what Chingiz told her when he saw the pills' bottle. She understands how cold and insensitive Chingiz really is. A man with a heart of stone. So why should she sacrifice her life for a kind of heartless bastard that he is.

In effect what Ziba wanted to accomplish was to get Chingiz to see what he is doing to her. She had thought that a suicide attempt would get Chingiz to reconsider his attitude toward her and change him for the better, but now she knows that to have done so was a futile effort.

\- Thank goodness that at least he took me to the hospital, Ziba thinks to herself.

Now Ziba is sure that she is alone and vulnerable within the confines of that house of horror. Not even her family could help her. She knows now what kind of a person Chingiz truly is and with whom she has to deal. Therefore, she now decides to try a different strategy.

Ziba is clever and resourceful. So far, her only shortcoming in life has been her stubbornness. To have destroyed her own life when things did not go her way. But now, she has learned her lesson. It is never too late to start again.

\- It cannot get worse than this, she thinks to herself.

She has got a plan.

She gets out of the bed, drinks a glass of squeezed limejuice to calm her headache and begins to clean, cook and put the house in order as if nothing had happened.

She dresses nicely, puts on a little bit of makeup and waits for Chingiz.

The clock on the window ledge keeps ticking away. One minute, one quarter, half an hour, one hour, two, three . . . hours go by; it is past midnight and there is still no sign of Chingiz.

Ziba falls asleep at the dinner table.

Suddenly she hears a key rattling in the keyhole and wakes up. Chingiz arrives. Ziba gets up and greets him. Chingiz looks around. There is nothing out of ordinary going on. The house is sparkling clean. Ziba is dressed nicely and the table is set.

Chingiz, the savage, smiles and says hello. He looks pleased. He has got a maid who feeds him and satisfies his every need despite all that he does to her.

Ziba walks toward Chingiz with a smile and takes his jacket, hangs it on the coat hanger, and takes him to the table. Chingiz sits at the table. He looks delighted. Ziba dishes out the food, which was kept warm for hours in the oven. They eat although none of them is exactly hungry. Chingiz has already eaten while at Kobra's, and Ziba is still not feeling too well to be hungry.

Not a word is spoken at the dinner table. Neither Ziba nor Chingiz wants to ruin the mood by saying something wrong. After dinner, Ziba clears the table and wipes off the tablecloth. The night is young. Ziba allows the dirty dishes to be left for later on. Instead, she gets undressed and invites Chingiz to bed.

Chingiz has clearly nothing against that offer.

Given her naiveté in life, Ziba thinks that pleasing Chingiz in every way will make a difference in his behavior toward her. She foolishly believes that by pressing the right buttons, Chingiz will somehow miraculously become a better man and a more loving husband.

That night Ziba endures a lot of in bed, everything from degrading name-callings to the sort of sexual acts that are appalling to her.

For Ziba, putting up with such horrendous ordeal that night was her means of pleasing Chingiz in the hopes of getting through to him.

The experience was humiliating for her. She felt dirty and disgusted. She could not help but feel sorry for herself to not have anyone to stand up for her and to support her. The impact of such demeaning experiences was something that she had to live with for the rest of her life. As for Chingiz however, things could not have gone better. He was in heaven. He could have never imagined having such an obedient and submissive wife. For him, this was fantastic, but this was not to last forever.

Days went by one after another. Six months of their marriage had passed and much had transpired during those months.

Chingiz had clashed with Ziba's parents and had forbidden Ziba to visit them or any other one of her relatives. She had become slowly but surely more isolated. What was even worse was that she had become pregnant. She had been kept locked up at home and run ragged with housework from dawn to dusk.

Chingiz had also implemented nonsensical rules as far as the household expenses were concerned. He had put Ziba on a weekly allowance for household expenses, for the expenditure of which she had to provide Chingiz with a detailed record every Friday and submit receipts. He was extremely vigilant on how Ziba spent the money. This was Chingiz's way to maintain full control over Ziba; something he could not do with anyone else, but this was a golden opportunity as he could fully exercise his dominance in dealing with a helpless teenager.

Ziba, on the other hand, had realized that she needed to get smarter and devise a strategy to secure her future. She had come to the understanding that she must fend for herself. She knew that there was no one to help her. She stood alone against a tyrant of a husband.

From the weekly allowances then, Ziba started saving a little, here and there, and hiding it away for a rainy day.

The pregnancy was a trump card for her, or at least, that is what Ziba thought. She was sure that Chingiz's attitude toward her would change with the arrival of a baby.

The big day Ziba had been looking forward to for nine months finally arrives. Chingiz is at home when Ziba goes into labor.

Much to Ziba's surprise, as soon as Ziba starts having her contractions, he leaves the house and returns an hour later with a midwife. That must have been Chingiz's plan all along, but he never said anything to Ziba.

Ziba, who wanted to have her first baby be delivered in a hospital just in case anything went wrong during the delivery, did not appreciate Chingiz going against her wishes only for the sake of saving money.

Since the first time Ziba woke up with nausea, Chingiz refused to take her to a medical clinic for any examination. She found out about her pregnancy once her stomach started to get bigger.

She never visited a doctor throughout her pregnancy. Her parents also knew nothing about the pregnancy since they had moved to another city.

Ziba felt like a fool to have even thought that the pregnancy or the birth of the baby would make any difference in Chingiz's attitude for the better.

A midwife was the only one who was present during the childbirth. Chingiz had left as soon as he had dropped off the midwife at home and he was not back until the next day.

Ziba and Chingiz had got a daughter. A little, sweet, healthy daughter. She was born in the same home and in the same bed where Ziba had gone through so much suffering and misery.

Nonetheless, Ziba was happy over the birth of her child. This was Ziba's first born. She was a mother now. The joy of motherhood had lifted up her spirit. A feeling that gives a woman one hundred percent strength in order to protect her children.

Chingiz and Ziba did not talk much about the baby during her pregnancy. Ziba had tried a few times to take up the subject with Chingiz, but it only led to more arguments. So, most of the planning for the baby including, choosing her name was left to Ziba. She had already thought of some baby names for both boy and girl. Now that it was clear that it was a baby-girl, she called her Anahita.

Ziba was glad to have a girl. Someone of the same sex that could relate to her in her old age, she thought. Anahita was a sweet, little, innocent girl who opened up her eyes in a rat-hole she had to call home.

Although Chingiz did not show any interest in their child, he was proud of himself. She was his child. An old man in his sixties had made a baby. This was proof that he was still as healthy and strong as a young guy.

Chingiz comes home the next day. He seems neither angry nor happy. He is indifferent toward the baby. Ziba holds the baby in her arms and goes up to Chingiz.

\- Look! We had a little girl. I have called her Anahita. Do not be shy, you can hold her! Ziba says cheerfully.

Chingiz looks at the baby.

He sees how Anahita's small hands move in the air. He sees how the little baby he helped to bring to the world looks at him with a beautiful smile. All that occupies him for a few seconds and moves him. He takes hold of his little girl and asks Ziba:

\- Did you say her name was Anahita?

\- Yes, if you do not mind? Asks Ziba gently.

\- No, no, my little girl. Congratulations Ziba. She is a sweet, little girl you have given birth to, Chingiz says cheerfully.

That is most surprising to Ziba. She is amazed how Chingiz's cold and mean demeanor has changed to the point that he congratulates her and praises her for something. She is just as much surprised, as she is glad to have got Chingiz to say a few nice words. Unfortunately, life's good moments are always shorter than the bad ones.

Now Chingiz has proof of his masculinity. Proof that he is still good for something. Something that he could not prove in all the years after Kobra got sick. Something that made him feel humiliated. All of Kobra's family blamed Chingiz for what had happened to Kobra. All of them blamed Chingiz for Kobra's sickness and her eventual surgery and lifelong ramifications of that.

Now, Chingiz could prove to the world that he was still a man, a real man! And that he was the father of a newborn baby.

Chingiz is now eager to show off his daughter to those who made him feel so humiliated for years. He wants to show Anahita to the whole world. Therefore, he starts talking about Ziba to every one. He no longer wants to keep Ziba hidden from the world. He is anxious for the world to know about his marriage to Ziba. And he wants nothing more than to use Anahita as a thorn in the side of Kobra's family. Ziba who has nothing against Chingiz's boasting and bragging to people—as this was an indication of Chingiz's change of heart—goes out of her way to encourage Chingiz.

Inevitably, it does not take long before Kobra finds out what Chingiz has been up to all along and confronts him. But Chingiz is quick to put the blame on Kobra for his marriage with Ziba. In particular, he claims that her illness was the reason he had to re-marry.

Kobra, who was never worried that Chingiz would re-marry, is dumbfounded and cannot do anything about it. She is infuriated with Chingiz.

Legally, there is nothing Kobra can do about that. The law is on Chingiz's side because Kobra is physically unable to perform her wifely duties. But Kobra is not the type of person who gives up that easily. She will now raise hell. She shouts at Chingiz and curses him and his new family.

Kobra is great at making a scene and getting her family involved to sort Chingiz out. Specially, with Chingiz's awful reputation and his disgusting affairs, which are well known by Kobra since she had a hand in most of it for the sole purpose of keeping Chingiz busy. It was Kobra who had to take one of the maids to a midwife when she had got pregnant by Chingiz.

Kobra put up with all of that for many years so as to avoid having a real competition. Regardless of how hideous Chingiz was, Kobra did not want him to have another wife or more correctly put, she did not want to share Chingiz's money with someone else. To deal with Chingiz's new marriage, Kobra could do nothing but to resort to sorcery and public condemnation of his new family.

In the aftermath of breaking the news to Kobra, Chingiz keeps avoiding Kobra for a while. His visits with Kobra become less frequent. He spends the majority of his time with Ziba and Anahita. He treats Ziba slightly better. Ziba, who is happy with the small improvements in Chingiz's attitude, tries not to rock the boat in any shape or form.

Chingiz still wants detailed weekly reports regarding the household budget though. And Ziba is still in service of Chingiz like a maid. She serves him dutifully and pleases him unconditionally. The only thing that keeps Ziba's dreams alive is Anahita. Having Anahita in her life is her only source of joy.

Kobra, who is not sitting still, is busy plotting to somehow end Chingiz's new marriage. To that effect, she holds family get-togethers where her relatives can get a chance to meet Chingiz and intimidate him. The family gatherings are held once a week and each week at a different relative's house. Chingiz has no desire to attend these gatherings but he is afraid that by not showing up, he would give Kobra an upper hand to bash him and to turn everyone further against him. He is, therefore, forced to go at least one night a week. It is ironic that Chingiz, who did not want to spend any time with Kobra since Anahita was born, no longer has a choice in the matter and has to be with not only Kobra but also her family once a week.

All this gives Kobra a chance to work on Chingiz in every way possible in the hopes of putting an end to his second marriage. At the same time, Kobra's relatives keep condemning him for what he has done and keep pressing him to divorce Ziba.
Chapter 6

Ziba, who is now a little happier about her life than before, is totally unaware of what Kobra is cooking up for her. She keeps busy with her household chores and looks after Anahita.

Ziba is not a child anymore. She seems to have slowly learned how to get on Chingiz's good side and how to survive. She has been noticing how the birth of their daughter has had a slight positive effect on Chingiz and she hopes that it stays the same. She has also managed to put a little saving together for herself through taking small amounts from the household allowance every week without Chingiz noticing it.

Chingiz has come clean with Kobra. He is more open about his feelings for Ziba and Anahita, and less concerned about Kobra's nags about betrayal and divorce. Kobra has repeatedly expressed her desire for Chingiz to divorce Ziba, but it has all been in vain.

Days and nights go by. Anahita grows older. She is now six months old. Ziba wants them to move to a bigger apartment. A one-room flat with a kitchenette is not that suitable for a family of three. She has, on several occasions, brought up the subject, but has not got any response from Chingiz. Ziba believes that Anahita should have her own room. But one cannot talk reason with Chingiz. He easily gets annoyed when Ziba says the same thing twice. There has been a slight progress with Chingiz though. He has not stepped foot in a brothel for quite some time and this counts as an improvement in Chingiz. Perhaps Chingiz has no reason to frequent the brothels when he has a wife who stands by him and does everything that is asked of her. Perhaps Chingiz cannot live that way anymore and has come to appreciate living a normal, decent life. Perhaps . . .

No one knows why, but for whatsoever reason the only place he goes to, besides home, is work and nowhere else.

Ziba has no contact with her parents and relatives and does not socialize with her neighbors either. Chingiz has banned her from doing so and for the time being, she obeys him without question.

One evening Ziba cooks steak and roasted potatoes, Chingiz's favorite meal. She puts make-up on, wears her short red dress and makes herself look sexy for Chingiz. She goes through all that trouble just to talk to him and get him to agree to move into a bigger apartment!

At some point, good luck can turn into bad luck unexpectedly and without warning. It so happens that Chingiz had been at Kobra's place for lunch that day. Kobra had called Chingiz at work telling him that she needs to see him to talk about something important. Tired of Kobra's badgering over the phone, Chingiz had finally agreed to go over for lunch.

Coming at Chingiz from a new angle, Kobra had refrained from talking about divorce or betrayal. Instead she had kept harping on the age difference between Chingiz and Ziba and the ramifications of that. More specifically, she had pointed out how an old man could never satisfy a young girl's needs. Or how Ziba could be lured away by other men of her own age. And ultimately, she had warned Chingiz that Ziba might even commit adultery as a result of the age difference between them.

So instead of nagging at Chingiz, Kobra had tried to portray herself as Chingiz's guardian angel; someone who was merely looking out for him and giving him sound advice. She had pretended to be concerned for him and his new wife. She had taken up the role of a mother who was out there to protect her son from getting hurt by his bride.

Thanks to her devious plot, Kobra had somewhat succeeded in planting the seeds of suspicion in Chingiz's mind. But she was well aware that it would take more than one session of brainwashing to persuade Chingiz and make him completely suspicious of Ziba.

All that nonsense that Kobra put in Chingiz's head gave Chingiz something to think about during the rest of the day.

After his visit at Kobra's, he begins to analyze his marriage. He keeps thinking about what Kobra had said about the age difference between Ziba and him. He cannot help but agree that he is much older than Ziba. That he will not live long enough to see Ziba get old. That he will not be physically strong and sexually active for long. He wonders how long he has got left of his life. He is almost sixty-seven years old and Ziba is only about seventeen. He is not sure how long he can keep up with the needs of a young girl. Maybe five, ten, twenty, or, at a maximum, twenty-five years provided nothing happens. On the whole, Chingiz is completely consumed by all these thoughts as he takes a long walk from Kobra's house.

The impact of those troubling thoughts manifests itself when Chingiz gets home that night. Ziba who had taken the trouble to make herself look seductive for her husband is confronted by an angry and bitter man. Chingiz does not even say hello when he comes in. He does not notice Ziba's outfit and makeup. He sits at the dining table and asks about dinner. Ziba serves him food without uttering a word. She sees in Chingiz's face how irritated he is. But why? Ziba wonders. What is it now? Is he mad at me or something has happened at work? She asks herself.

They eat their dinner without exchanging a word. After dinner, Chingiz reads, or pretends to read, his newspaper when in fact he is in deep thoughts that Kobra put in his head earlier that day.

Ziba takes care of the dishes after dinner. She does not know how to get him to snap out of his bad mood. She is afraid of saying something that would make him more aggravated and cause a fight. After doing the dishes, she goes toward the bed. A few seconds later, she asks Chingiz if he is coming to bed. He takes his eyes off the newspaper and glances over at her.

Chingiz, who had not noticed her all night long, all of sudden stares at her. Ziba is in her underwear and is lying on top of the blanket. Anahita sleeps right next to their bed in a crib that Chingiz had bought at a flea market. So who knows how long it will be before Anahita wakes up. It only takes a small noise for her to wake up.

Chingiz is turned on by what he sees.

Ziba has managed to get him to notice her. He gets up, takes his clothes off and crawls into bed with Ziba.

Having got Chingiz's attention, Ziba feels like everything is going according to plan. But so simple it was not. In the middle of the night, Chingiz wakes up all frustrated and angry at the whole world. He hates everything and everyone. He starts accusing Ziba of adultery. He gets out of the bed and sits on a chair at the dining table while talking loudly and uninterrupted about how he was lured into this marriage. He keeps babbling on about Ziba cheating on him and how he will find out about her unfaithfulness and whatever that goes on during the day when he is at work. Basically, Chingiz accuses her of everything he can think of. He even goes as far as suggesting that Anahita is not his child rather someone else's with whom Ziba must have had an affair.

Ziba is wide-awake now. But she cannot fathom a word of what Chingiz is saying. This was something new for her. She was used to a lot of nonsense from Chingiz except this. How is it that all of a sudden he wakes up in the middle of the night accusing her of adultery? Where did he get this damn idea? She is to find out the answer later when Chingiz mentions having lunch with Kobra. That is when Ziba understands Kobra's influence in Chingiz's life.

Kobra, who could not get through to Chingiz before, is now involved in their life in a way that can ruin all Ziba's plans, she thinks to herself as she listens to Chingiz's rambling on about his visit with Kobra earlier that day.

Ziba has really never had a chance to ask questions about Kobra. She still does not know who Kobra really is and what Chingiz's life was like before he met her.

Chingiz is so angry and irate that he no longer cares about what comes out of his mouth. He praises Kobra while at the same time cursing Ziba.

\- Who knows what the hell this slut is up to when I'm at work? She was not even a virgin when I married her. I am sure that she had slept with someone before she married me. Her f...g father tricked me. This f...g family got me trapped, Chingiz rambles on.

Chingiz becomes more and more offensive in his hysterical outbreak to the point that he accuses Ziba's father of an unspeakable act.

For Ziba, that is like someone drove a knife into her heart. She could tolerate a lot of things, but this has gone too far. She bursts into crying. Her honour is questioned and brought into disgrace by a man who has no shame and no morals. She screams so loud that Anahita wakes up. Chingiz cares neither for Ziba who is sitting on the bed crying, nor for Anahita who cries lying in her crib. He continues with his ranting and raving. Ziba gets up and holds Anahita in her arms. Her heart aches. It is now that the feeling of hatred against Chingiz gets a hold of Ziba.

\- What is it you want Chingiz? What have I done to you? Have I not been a caring and compassionate wife for you? Asks Ziba with a rasping voice filled with sorrow.

Chingiz is not listening to her. He is busy talking nonstop like a radio transmission that goes on continuously around the clock. Chingiz continues to blame Ziba and accuses her of a lot of things. On the other hand, he praises his beloved Kobra for all the years of being there for him.

All in all, in the course of Chingiz's rampage a lot of details about Kobra and her children come up that are new to Ziba. Chingiz happens to mention the names of the children he has with Kobra, Saaid and Sara. He praises them and brags about their success in life, as if he had anything to do with their upbringing let alone their success. It surely was not him who sacrificed his youth to raise them. At any rate, these were new pieces of information for Ziba.

How long this madness will continue, Ziba thinks to herself while Chingiz talks like a parrot saying the same things over and over again. How demented is this man anyway? How stupid could I have been to let myself be trapped in this life? Ziba wonders.

Why are some men so selfish? They believe they are superior to women. They think that no matter how old they are, they can still carry on the same way as when they were young. They never feel old and worn out. Some men have absolutely no respect for the opposite sex and believe that women were created for their sake only. To certain extent, some men have condescending views about women irrespective of where in the world they come from.

Even in countries where women have more freedom, men still exercise dominion over women in certain aspects.

That night neither Ziba nor Anahita gets a moment of peace and quiet. The madness goes on till five o'clock in the morning. Finally at half past five in the morning, Chingiz gets tired and goes to bed before he has to get up about an hour later to go to work.

Thanks to Chingiz, Ziba has had to nurse Anahita all night long since she got restless and could not go back to sleep.

In general, Anahita is a calm and peaceful child. Some children have a tendency to cry a lot and make a fuss over everything. Anahita is nothing like that. As soon as Ziba breastfeeds her, she goes to sleep.

In the morning after Chingiz goes to work, Ziba dresses up and leaves with Anahita. She goes to visit her uncle Hussein who lives on the other side of the town.

It is the first time since she has got married that she visits anyone in her family. Hussein and his wife are delighted to see her. No one had dared visit Ziba since she married that monster Chingiz. He forbade her to have any contact with anyone particularly, her family. But Ziba who is tired of all Chingiz's bickering and badgering wants to see if her uncle can help her find a way out of this abusive relationship.

Ziba tells her uncle about all that she has had to endure since she swallowed her pride and set foot in that mad-man's house. She cannot turn to her parents for help since they now live in another city. And she cannot reach anyone else since there is no phone at home. The only way she gets to find out how her parents are doing is through scattered letters, which she has to keep hidden from Chingiz.

She tells her uncle everything. She says that half the time she does not know whether she is coming or going. She tells him that she is afraid of becoming a divorcee. She mentions that she has to deal with the harsh reality of having a child who needs support from both parents and yet, is deprived of that since Chingiz is no support to either Anahita or Ziba. Ziba does not want to give up hope thinking that may be one day Chingiz would come to his senses and treat them humanely.

This is exactly the same mistake that Kobra and all the others made with regard to Chingiz. He never takes anything as seriously as his own selfish needs and desires. If he was incapable of changing and becoming a better man in all the years, why would anyone think that he can, or he is going to do that now?!

Ziba is desperate. She feels embarrassed that she has had to go to her uncle and his family for help. If she could have found another way to solve her problems, she would have surely opted for that.

Her uncle listens to her intensely. He remembers how the whole misery started. He remembers the day he found out how his sister and brother-in-law that is, Ziba's parents, had agreed to such obscene and unholy union that was bound to have devastating impact on the life of their own teenage daughter.

Hussein is the only close relative who openly voiced his criticism and opposed Ziba's marriage. That is why he did not attend Ziba's doomed wedding ceremony, which was held at Ziba's father's home. Now Hussein has the confirmation about what he feared the most and warned his sister all along.

Hussein is a retired welder who lives a scarce life with his wife. They have no children because of Hussein's impotence. Hussein is a wise and rational man. He is also a kind man who would stand up for others and for what is right. If he could have helped Ziba's father to find a job when he got laid off and thus, preventing Ziba's abhorring marriage, he would have. Not having been able to help out, Hussein felt partially responsible for what happened to Ziba.

After Ziba pours her heart out, her uncle promises to get in touch with her parents and talk to them.

Ziba, who needs to get home quickly before Chingiz shows up, cuts her visit short and heads back to the torture chamber she has to call "home."

She feels slightly relieved after sharing her dark secret with someone in her family.

Chingiz comes home at around nine that night. He does not appear to be tense. Ziba does not know in what state of mind he is after a long night of crazy outbursts. She greets him and gets an answer back. Chingiz asks how the day had been for Ziba, which is rather weird. He has never been interested in what Ziba does during the day or how she has been or anything like that.

He has been very controlling from day one they got married. Ziba was denied contact with her family and her friends with whom she used to hang out.

With Chingiz's question, Ziba becomes just as alarmed as she is surprised. Alarmed that Chingiz may have got wind of her visit at her uncle's and surprised over Chingiz's sudden interest in her existence. How will she respond? Should she reveal where she had gone or keep her mouth shut? Does Chingiz really know about her visit to her uncle or is this just a coincidence?

She remains silent for a minute while thousands of questions go through her head. She decides not to tell anything about her little escapade earlier on that day.

\- Yes, it was O.K. She replies.

Chingiz watches her attentively while he sits at the dining table. It seems that he is waiting for dinner. Ziba picks up his slippers and puts them in front of his feet. Then she sets the table, but before she gets a chance to dish out the food Chingiz asks:

\- Did you not go out today?

Now this is scary. Chingiz must have something up his sleeves to ask a question like that. Ziba starts to tremble. Anahita sleeps and everything has been calm so far, which is what Ziba wants desperately. Most of all, what she wants is not to get beaten up, but how is she going to get herself out of this. Should she tell the truth, or come up with something that does not arouse more suspicion?

\- Yes, Anahita and I went for a little walk in the city. It was such a nice weather and we wanted to get some fresh air. Ziba responds with a trembling voice while she puts the food on the table.

Chingiz picks up his plate and gives it to Ziba. She serves him his food. Ziba dares not look into his eyes. He starts gulping down his food in a big hurry. He has no table manners whatsoever.

Ziba has lost her appetite and does not feel hungry. There is a knot in her stomach, but to avoid drawing any attention to herself from Chingiz, she takes a bit of food and starts eating. The first round of face-off is over. Chingiz stretches her plate out to Ziba. She gets up and serves the brute again. Chingiz says nothing more at the dinner table.

After dinner and as Ziba gets on with clearing and cleaning the table, Chingiz says:

\- One of the local vendors saw you going out today and it was him who called me at work. You see, I have asked a few vendors to keep an eye on you.

Now Ziba understands why Chingiz was inquiring about her day and whether she had been out. The mystery is solved. She realizes that Chingiz does not know where exactly she had gone to during the day. But this makes her aware that there are people in the neighborhood who have been put up to spying on her. She notices that this had been the first time she had ventured outside of her local residential area. On all other occasions, she had only gone as far as the local stores to do her daily shopping. So that is why Chingiz had never asked her about her daily activities until now. Thanks to his spies in the neighborhood, he had been tipped off.

Ziba becomes nervous and furious at the same time, but tries not to show it. Chingiz is baffled by Ziba's silence and out of pure curiosity he asks her:

\- Did you hear what I just said?

\- Yes, I heard you. Ziba responds before things get out of control.

\- Well! What do you think of that? Chingiz asks in a triumphant and arrogant manner.

Ziba is extremely frustrated and would like nothing more that to punch his lights out. She wished, once and for all, she could have the courage to put this low-life in his place.

I wish I were strong enough to crush every bone in his body, Ziba thinks to herself.

There is a heavy atmosphere in that tiny apartment; the air is full of anger and hatred on one front and contempt and disdain on the other.

Chingiz, still seated at the dinner table with his head turned towards her, waits for Ziba's reaction with a smirk on his face. Ziba is standing at the sink with a plate in one hand and a dish sponge in the other. It is quiet in the room. The only sound is the water flowing from the tap into the sink.

Ziba turns to Chingiz and asks:

\- Is it that you don't trust me that you have got people spying on me?

\- No I did it for your own good and out of concern for your safety. It is dangerous for a young woman with a child to be alone and no one to watch out for them or to keep an eye on them. I am afraid that if anything happens, you are too young and inexperienced to know what to do and who to turn to. Chingiz replies.

With these words, Chingiz tries to justify his underhanded and spiteful action. He wants to turn the situation to his own advantage and make Ziba believe that he was doing her a service.

Ziba is young and inexperienced but not dumb and blind. She knows well what his true intentions are. Chingiz wants to control her. But in order to avoid further quarrels, she decides to end the argument for the time being and move on.

\- Thanks! Ziba says in the hopes that Chingiz would let go of the subject.

The day after, when Chingiz is heading out to work, he advises Ziba:

\- If you need me for anything, go to the tailor next door. He has my phone number and you can call me from there! I have already spoken with him.

He writes his work phone number on top of yesterday's newspaper that lies on the table.

That day Ziba has a lot to do around the house: wash, clean, cook, and everything else. But she knows she is going to be saddled with "new tasks" later.

Chingiz goes to work. By eleven o'clock he gets a phone call at work whereby he is told that his daughter, Sara, has been in an accident and is at the general hospital downtown.

Frantically, Chingiz leaves the store and heads over to the hospital. Now, Kobra, Saaid, and Sara have become more endearing to Chingiz than ever before. It seems that he does not appreciate what he has until he faces the possibility that it may be gone, or when it is gone already. Surely, it is too late to play the role of a caring father or a caring husband for those he never cared from the beginning.

But then again, Kobra and her kids are not too fond of him either. They are rather disappointed in him and they feel more hatred toward him than love and admiration. Yet, worse than them is Sam who is most bitter and resentful and wishes his father all the misery in the world.

Kobra's plan is to try and somehow ruin Chingiz's new life.

As it turns out, the accident is nothing serious and the injury, which was described by Kobra to have been extensive, is nothing more than an over-dramatization.

The way it was put to Chingiz, it sounded as if Sara was on her deathbed when in reality she had sustained no serious injuries.

At any rate, Chingiz rushes to the hospital. He is melancholic, or at least he looks that way. Kobra is the first one he runs into at the hospital, an opportunity that gives Kobra more time to get him worked up. She makes a big fuss about the whole thing and spices it up as much as she can. She claims that Sarah's car is completely wrecked. She goes further to state that Sara is going to need a new car, but her husband cannot afford getting her one.

Since Chingiz has a measly pension and no debts, he can easily apply and get a loan from the bank. Kobra knows about Chingiz's financial status so, she seizes the golden opportunity she has been given to strike and further exploit the situation.

Chingiz visits Sara. He looks worried and sad and is now suddenly a father who loves his daughter.

Chingiz stays at the hospital for a few hours. In the meantime, Kobra and Sara's husband come at him like sharks. They engage Chingiz in a long conversation about the state of Sara's car and the need for her to have a car. Chingiz, who is still shaken up by Sara's accident, is easily manipulated by them two and agrees to purchase a new car for his daughter.

At the time, he seems to be truly under Kobra's spell. Perhaps Kobra's long meddling in the world of sorcery and witchcraft is paying off! Kobra, Saaid, and Sara have been elevated to a higher status in Chingiz's life. Chingiz, who would never agree to something like that so easily and without intimidation and interference from Kobra's family, readily accepts Kobra's proposition to get a new car for Sara. As such, Chingiz and Kobra go directly to the bank that afternoon and submit an application for a loan at the same bank branch where Sara's husband works. So it is not surprising that his application gets approved the very same day. Everything is now set for them to get what they want.

To have to pay off the loan over the course of the loan's term, Chingiz has to cut back on something else to make ends meet and, of course, what else than Ziba's dream of moving into a decent apartment.
Chapter 7

Chingiz heads home earlier than usual. All the way home, he appears to be somewhat aggravated. He is annoyed that from then on, he has a debt to pay off. He has already got a lot of expenses that he has to pay for from his low income so, surely, the loan is an added burden that he did not need. When Chingiz is under a lot of pressure, be it mentally or emotionally, he automatically resorts to sex as a means of distraction and escape from reality.

In the past, the road to the brothels was his only escape route, but now he has Ziba to provide him with sexual relief. Trapped in a dungeon, his obedient wife, Ziba, is always glad to be of service to him!

Chingiz gets home while Ziba is feeding Anahita. Ziba greets him and asks:

\- Is everything OK?

\- No, why?!

\- You are early . . .

\- Okay, stop talking! Hurry up and feed her. I am hungry and I want to have sex. What is for dinner?

Ziba finishes feeding Anahita and gets the food on the table for her darling of a husband.

There is nothing wrong with Chingiz's appetite. He shovels the food into his mouth as if someone is going to take it away from him. After dinner, he burps and belches a few times. He gets up, goes to the bathroom and does not even close the bathroom door.

These are shocking behaviors to Ziba. What other talents does this man have? He is a master of surprises. What is there to say? Ziba thinks. But no matter how hard she tries, she cannot keep quiet.

She shouts at Chingiz:

\- Close the damn door, have you no shame . . .

\- Shut the f... up. This is my house and I do what I want, Chingiz yells back at her.

Without any regards for Anahita, Chingiz comes out of the bathroom and orders Ziba to get in bed. It does not make any difference to him whether Anahita is awake or asleep, and whether or not she can understand what goes on. He is absolutely something else.

Ziba refuses to do as he says and tells him that so long as Anahita is awake, he should wait.

Before she gets to utter another word, she is bashed in the head by Chingiz. She does not even get a chance to react to the first blow when she gets smacked in the head for the second time.

\- You do not get to lecture me. That is all I need: to get lectured by a loser. If you do not want to have sex, I will divorce you and take the child away from you. You have to do as I say! Says Chingiz so furiously that Anahita starts crying. Ziba, who does not have anyone else to turn to and is terrified of getting separated from her baby, does not say another word. With a massive headache, she goes to bed and lies down.

Anahita has finally calmed down and plays with her dolls. Chingiz, who does not care either way, gets in bed with Ziba.

All of a sudden, Anahita gets up and crawls toward Ziba in the bed. She is too young to understand what is going on. She tries to draw her parents' attention to herself. She stands at the foot of the bed and shouts at her mother. Chingiz, who cannot tolerate being interrupted, punches Anahita in the chest to get her to go away. Anahita falls backward, hits the floor and starts crying. Chingiz is, indeed, interrupted so he jumps out of the bed all the while swearing at heavens and earth.

Ziba gets up, holds her frightened child in her arms and tries to comfort her.

The situation is very tense. For the first time since they moved in together, nothing has ever got in the way of Chingiz's sexual gratification. Ziba has always had to please him, but now Anahita is there and a mother's love for her child comes before that of her husband particularly, such a husband.

Chingiz, the monster, is more furious and angry than before. But he must learn that Anahita is not a newborn baby anymore.

Chingiz gets up and goes to the bathroom. Agitated, Ziba sits on the floor with Anahita in her arms and looks at her useless husband whom she hates more than ever. Her head is spinning. She is going through a very difficult ordeal at a very young age. Her eyes are red from crying and tears roll down her face. The headache is getting worse by the minute as it keeps pounding. It is as if someone hits her in the head with a hammer.

What will become of us? When is this going to end? She asks herself.

After Chingiz comes out of the bathroom, he gets dressed and leaves without saying a word to Ziba. He is heading to a bar. So far, Chingiz had abstained from taking solace in alcohol. He may have had an occasional drink, but it was not a routine thing for him. He does not tolerate alcohol well; otherwise, he would have turned into an alcoholic a long time ago.

He spends the night in a bar drinking. While at the bar, he happens to see a couple of his old bodies from his past employment. Having been drinking, he opens up to them about his life. But he talks about his life in a way that makes him look like a victim. He complains a great deal about Ziba and depicts her as a villain. He also claims to have put a lot of efforts into providing a good life for Ziba and that is how he is being repaid by her. In general, he paints a dark picture of Ziba and makes her look like an evil person to his former colleagues. Obviously with those descriptions, they find themselves disliking Ziba and all the while, feeling sorry for Chingiz.

What they did not know, and naturally had no way of knowing, was how much older Chingiz was in comparison to Ziba. Not only Chingiz told them a whole bunch of lies about Ziba, he also deliberately withheld anything that would have been damaging to himself. Had they known about just the huge age difference between Chingiz and Ziba let alone the way he treats her, they would have felt a lot more sympathetic toward Ziba verses Chingiz. But not knowing the truth about their marriage, they instead comforted Chingiz and gave him advice on how he should handle the witch.

Spending the night at the bar further exacerbates Chingiz's feelings of anger and irritation. When he comes home at five o'clock in the morning, he looks hammered and hideous. It seems that on the way home, he must have not only fallen down but also thrown up all over himself. He reeks something awful due to the smell of vomit all over his clothes. He can barely stand up or talk.

When he opens the door, he sees that Ziba is up and waiting for him. She had put Anahita to bed, but she had not been able to sleep herself.

As soon as Chingiz steps into the apartment, Ziba rushes to his aid and helps him take off his smelly clothes. She wants to take him to the bathroom so that he can wash himself, but he wants to go to bed. Ziba gives up without a fight and lets him go to bed.

Chingiz, who is in no shape to throw a hissy fit, falls asleep immediately. He snores so loudly that he wakes up Anahita. He sounds like a bear. Ziba tends to Anahita until she goes to sleep, which takes about an hour.

At seven o'clock, the alarm clock goes off. It is time for Chingiz to wake up and get ready to go to work, but he is in such deep sleep, lying like a log in bed, that he does not even hear the alarm going. In the meanwhile, the ones who do wake up by the sound of the alarm are Anahita and poor Ziba, who had fallen asleep sitting at the dining table. As soon as she wakes up, she feels pain all over her body. Anahita, on the other hand, starts to cry as soon as she is up. Ziba gets up and goes over to her. She takes her in her arms and tries to calm her down.

Chingiz is still in bed in deep sleep. Ziba gets breakfast ready for Chingiz so as to not give him a reason for making trouble when he wakes up while at the same time, she feeds Anahita. It is ten o'clock. Ziba does not dare touch Chingiz or wake him up. She does not know in what temperament he will be if he is awakened. Surely, being in a good mood would be out of the question, Ziba thinks. While the monster is sleep, Ziba takes his stinking clothes into the bathroom and starts washing them. She has already fed Anahita and put her in bed again.

It is almost twelve o'clock before Chingiz wakes up with a hangover and a headache. He feels horrible much the same way that he smells. As soon as he wakes up, he yells out:

\- ZIBAAA, ZIBA . . .

\- Yes, yes, what is it? Ziba answers unnervingly.

\- Give me a painkiller! Hurry up!

Ziba enters the kitchenette and gets a tablet and a glass of water. He takes the pill and drinks lots of water to swallow the pill down. Ziba stands at the side of the bed waiting for the next order from Lord Chingiz. He gives the glass back to Ziba and says:

\- Oh, shit, that was hot water!

Ziba takes the glass and goes back to doing the laundry without bothering about Chingiz's gracious comment. Chingiz sits up in bed for about fifteen minutes. He cannot manage to get up. He has never been hung-over and so badly off in all his miserable life. His whole body is aching. He realizes that he must have fallen down more than once on his way home last night.

Breakfast table is still spread. Anahita lies comfortably in her crib, sleeping. Chingiz stays in bed and has no energy to get up. Ziba is busy with the laundry. Suddenly, there comes a knock on the door.

\- Ziba, Ziba, see who the hell it is! Orders Lord Chingiz.

Ziba leaves the laundry and all stressed out by the knock at the door, she opens the door. It is the tailor advising that Chingiz has an important call. It is his wife Kobra.

As soon as Ziba goes to tell him that, Chingiz says:

\- Yes, I heard it. Damn it, what is it now?

With no clothes on and reeking of his own vomit, he puts on a housecoat and goes along with the tailor. He has no choice but to go and answer the phone. It is Kobra and with her, he cannot afford getting into a conflict.

Kobra informs him about yet another accident but this time involving Sam. In a cold and insensitive tone of voice, she tells him that Sam and his family have been killed in a train accident.

In a state of shock, Chingiz sits down on a chair by the phone, all shaken up. For Kobra, however, this does not constitute a tragic event. After all, she hated Sam with a passion. For her, Sam was a disgrace who had blemished her life. Now the stigma was gone.

Chingiz starts to think about when he had seen Sam last. Surely, it must have been many years ago. But how may years ago, one, five, ten . . . ? He has no idea. He cannot even remember when he last saw his son. Sam had broken all ties with Chingiz, Kobra, and everyone else including, his own mother for many, many years. He had decided to live his own life. As soon as he had got a chance to break free, he had jumped at it and had fled as far away as he could get from his so-called family and relatives, the ones who did not give him anything other than grief.

Now Sam's life had come to an abrupt end. Not only his but that of his wife and his adopted child.

Chingiz is brought back from past to present by a rowdy noise on the other end of the phone. It is Kobra shouting at him:

\- Hello . . . Chingiz. Can you hear me? Hey! Are you still there?

\- Yes, yes, I am here, responds Chingiz after pulling himself together.

\- The bodies are at the central hospital. You need to go there to get the bodies and then take them to the funeral house. I have to go now. Bye.

Kobra hangs up before Chingiz gets a chance to say anything. She is after all, Chingiz's "student" who after many years of being under his tutelage had skillfully learned how to become insensitive and cold-hearted. Moreover, she had never liked Sam. Therefore, there were no reasons for her to mourn his passing.

Frozen in time and motionless, Chingiz remains seated on the chair with the phone still in his hand, reflecting on the scant and scattered memories he had of Sam. He is stricken by grief. But the question is what it is that makes him sad. Is it really Sam's death that has touched him so much, or is there something else at the root of his sorrow?

Chingiz comes home. He is quiet. Not a word out of his mouth. For Ziba, the silence is deafening. He has forgotten how sick he was and cannot feel how badly his body hurts. He sits at the table.

Ziba asks:

\- What was that about?

No response from Chingiz. He keeps quiet so as to avoid revealing more of his secrets and telling her about yet another child of his that is, his first-born son whom he fathered by sleeping with a prostitute.

So far, Ziba has had no knowledge of Sam's existence, let alone the circumstances surrounding his birth, his childhood and his life.

Chingiz needs to go to the hospital. He gets up to go take a shower. But Ziba says:

\- What are you doing? I am in the middle of doing the laundry.

\- I need to take a shower. Get this shit out of here! Chingiz answers while he kicks the laundry with his foot.

\- What are you doing? Let me take it, Ziba says furiously. She grabs the laundry and puts it in the sink. Chingiz takes a quick shower and comes out. While he is getting dressed, Ziba asks him:

\- Where are you going now? You are not feeling well. Has something happened?

Ziba gets no response from Chingiz. He does not seem to be listening to her. Instead, he says:

\- Give me another painkiller!

Ziba persists in wanting to know what is going on. She is just as much curious as she is worried. She wonders what has made him get dressed and get going so fast despite not feeling well. She wants to know where he is headed.

\- I asked you where you are going. Can you not even, for once, answer me? What did she say to you?

\- Who? Chingiz asks while pretending not to know to whom Ziba is referring in order to buy some time.

\- Kobra of course. The very person who called the tailor . . ..

By then, Chingiz is dressed and ready to leave. The only thing he is waiting for is the tablet for his headache. So, he cuts Ziba off and says:

\- Where is the tablet? Get it!

Ziba gives him the tablet and a glass of water and then he leaves.

Good God! What have I done to deserve this? Ziba asks her God. The God she used to believe in. The God she had asked for help on so many occasions. The God who she hoped was going to perform a miracle for her and turn her dark life around.

She is once again alone with her Anahita. She is exhausted after last night's horrific events. She feels tired and sleepy. Now that there is silence in the house and the maniac is out, she can take a nap, she thinks to herself. In order not to leave Anahita alone, she takes her to bed and puts her next to herself in bed.

The bed smells awful. It smells like puke and sweat. Ziba is too tired to be bothered with changing the bed sheets. She wants to sleep despite the horrendous smell of the sheets and the fact that Anahita is not sleepy and wants to play. Ziba is in such a state of exhaustion that she falls asleep almost as soon as her head hits the pillow.

Anahita is a cute, sweet, little girl with short, light-brown hair, big black eyes, and a round face. She is playful and happy for the most part. Since she is not tired, Ziba could not put her in her own bed. So, when she lies down next to Ziba with Ziba's arm around her waist, the child feels like she is caught in a trap. Ziba is in deep sleep. Anahita gets herself out of Ziba's hold. She crawls out of the bed and heads over to her toys that are on the floor in the middle of the room.

A child cannot understand what he or she is doing. Children cannot tell between good and evil, right and wrong, safe and dangerous. She picks up one of her dolls and crawls out of the apartment.

Due to the sense of urgency with which Chingiz left so suddenly and quickly, Ziba must have forgotten to properly close and lock the door behind him. So, the front door had been left ajar. Once Anahita touches the door, the door opens wide and she manages to sneak out.

Chingiz comes home around ten o'clock at night. Coming up to the door, he sees that the door is open. Standing at the doorstep, he yells out after Ziba without looking around first.

\- Ziba, Ziba.

He rushes into the apartment as Ziba is waking up from the sound of his screams.

\- Yes, what is it? Asks Ziba without noticing anything.

\- Where is Anahita?

\- WHAT? She is here. No . . . But, wait, Anahita. Anahita.

The house was not so big that one could get lost in it. So it was not long before she realizes what must have happened. Ziba starts to panic. She cries hysterically while putting on her shoes to go out and look for her little girl. Chingiz accompanies her. They look everywhere in the neighborhood and ask anyone they see on the street if they have seen a little girl, their daughter Anahita.

She is gone. She is nowhere to be found.

\- Now damn it, has there not been enough trauma already, Chingiz says with his face turned up toward the sky. It seems as if Chingiz is pleading with God, but in his own way. He seems to be utterly devastated and dispirited by all the misery that befell him in just one, single day.

It seems that the day's tragic events had awakened certain feelings in him that he never allowed himself to feel or exhibit. To lose two of his children on the same day was just as painful as his memories from his childhood. He who grew up without a father. He who did not get a share of life's good fortunes. He who had to close his heart and suppress his emotions throughout his life so as not to feel any pain, not to be affected by others' sufferings, and not to let anyone hurt him.

Chingiz is a broken man. He sits on the sidewalk and bursts into tears. He cries loud and from the heart.

Ziba, poor Ziba, who has not done anything wrong, has to suffer so much. She is beside herself and condemns Chingiz for all that he has done to her and her daughter, Anahita.

Feeling helpless, she sits next to Chingiz. The two of them seem lost. She wants to go to the police. People who pass by react differently toward them. Some cross the street to avoid walking past them. Others look the other way for a few seconds while they pass by. Only a few stop and ask them what has happened.

A young man in his thirties comes up to them and asks:

\- What is wrong? Can I help you with anything?

Chingiz does not even look up. His head is down; he does not feel like talking.

Ziba, who has now found someone who seems to be willing to help, grabs the man's jacket out of total desperation and pleads with him to help them.

\- Please, my child is missing. Help me find my Anahita! Please, I am beside myself with grief. My innocent child . . .

\- How old is she? How does she look like? The man interrupts Ziba.

\- She is twelve months old, large black eyes, light brown hair. What am I going to do now? Please, for goodness sake, help me . . .

\- As for her clothes, what was she wearing?

\- She had a white T-shirt on and a navy skirt. No shoes. Please . . .

\- Sure. I am a police officer. My name is Sayadi. I will help you.

Sayadi is an off-duty police officer who is in civilian clothing. He quickly goes and makes a phone call to the police station to report that a child is missing and he relays Anahita's description to the dispatch.

Chingiz is sitting still on the ground and does not move. Ziba looks frantic. She begs the policeman with a heart-wrenching tone of voice to stay with them and help them find Anahita.

The policeman is doing everything he can to help them. He believes that the best thing is for them to go to the police station and provide more information on their missing child. To that effect, he calls for a police car to come and get them.

The car arrives to take them to the police station. Sayadi asks Chingiz courteously to get in the car. Chingiz does not respond. He looks melancholic. How will Sayadi get him to cooperate without causing a squabble? He can tell from Chingiz's facial expression that he is at the end of his rope.

Sayadi wants to help and means well, however, he cannot force Chingiz to follow his orders. He is also unaware of Chingiz's relationship to Ziba. He thinks that Chingiz is Ziba's father and as such, he is heart-broken that his granddaughter is missing. So when he goes to comfort Chingiz and convince him to get up and get in the car, he says:

\- Come granddad, we will find your grandchild. There is nothing to worry about. Do not . . .

\- Listen you; I am not somebody's grandfather. You do not need to pry into people's private affairs. Mind you own business now, Chingiz interrupts him while he gets up to walk toward the car.

Sayadi is dumbfounded and is now curious. Who is Chingiz then if he is not Anahita's grandfather? For Sayadi, it was not easy to figure out Chingiz's real relationship with Ziba. It never even occurred to him that Chingiz might be Ziba's husband.

They get into the cruiser and head over to the police station. There is silence in the car for a while before the other officer asks:

\- We have issued an alert for Anahita but we need a photo of her. Can you get us a picture of her?

\- Yes, if you would be so kind as to drive us home, I have a lot of pictures of my Anahita, Ziba says with a quivering voice from crying.

She is choked up. She could not help but cry . . .

Chingiz sits quietly, dead silent, and gazes at the floor. He breathes heavily. He is not young anymore and after going through so much hardship that life has been putting him through and those that he created for himself, he was bound to collapse, if he was not already on the verge of doing so.

The officer asks for the address, turns the car around and heads toward their home. They had not got that far from their home yet, may be about a quarter of a mile away.

On the way, the officer asks Ziba:

\- Where is your husband? Are you going to inform him?

Ziba is not sure what to say and how to respond. She saw how Chingiz reacted when Sayadi called him grandpa. But before she gets a chance to respond, Chingiz replies:

\- It is not necessary. Just drive! What are you, a cop or a social worker?

The officer, who is also driving the vehicle, does not want to be rude to an old man and although he is stunned by Chingiz's reaction, he keeps quiet and does not say anything more. He is flabbergasted at the way Chingiz reacted to a simple question, but not to make matters worse for someone who is obviously in distress, he refrains from further probing into their lives.

Once they arrive at the house, Ziba sees a man standing at the door with a baby in his arms. It turns out that he is their neighbor who lives further down the hall on the same floor as them. Ziba rushes out of the car before the car has even come to a full stop and runs toward the building. Her heart is pounding as different thoughts go through her head: please, let it be Anahita. She reaches the man and quickly looks at the baby and rejoices at what she sees. It is, indeed, Anahita he is holding in his arms. She cries out loud from joy of having found her daughter, Anahita, while at the same time she takes her in her arms and kisses her face over and over again.

Chingiz looks relieved when he finds out that Anahita is safe and sound. He feels like the weight of the world that was on his shoulder has been lifted off.

Sayadi goes over to the man and asks him how he found the girl. He says that he and his wife were at work and when they got home they saw that their children had a new playmate.

Anahita had simply crawled down the hall when she had heard the noise of children playing. One of the neighbor's children who had just stepped out of the apartment at that moment had seen Anahita in the hallway and as children tend to do, she had taken her into the apartment and the three of them had been playing. But they had no idea where Anahita had come from. They did not know where she lived. They were playing together until their parents came home and realized that they had acquired an extra child. The father had then started asking Anahita where she lived and with as little as Anahita could say, he had figured out that she lived at the other end of the hallway on the same floor in the building. The neighbor had then tried to return the child to her parents but of course, no one was home.

All that time, Ziba and Chingiz were going around franticly looking for Anahita from one street to another and from one alley to the next.

Having guessed that the parents must be out looking for their kid, the caring and considerate neighbor had decided to wait at the main entrance until they turn up.

Sayadi jots down all the details, and since the child is back with her parents, he wraps up his investigation. He goes over to Ziba to say goodbye to her. Chingiz had gone in as soon as he had seen that Anahita was in Ziba's arms safe and sound.

\- So, everything went well. We are glad for your sake. Be careful next time, Sayadi says to Ziba and leaves with his colleague.

Ziba thanks the neighbor once again and goes in. Chingiz has already crawled into that filthy bed with all his clothes on. He has not even taken his shoes off.

The laundry is in the sink. The house is upside down. Everything is a complete mess. Ziba does not have any more energy left to even think about tidying up. She puts a blanket on the floor and lies down with Anahita in her arms.

Next day, Chingiz wakes up early in the morning in a fiery rush. He has got to go to work. He cannot be absent from work for several days in a row. The business owner is a friend of his but even friendship has its limits. He wakes Ziba up and gets her to make breakfast for him while he takes a shower.

Poor Ziba gets up with so much pain in her body, puts a small blanket on Anahita, goes to the kitchenette and makes breakfast. She has not slept well. Who would feel rested after sleeping on a blanket on hard, cement-floor without a pillow and a comforter?

She takes out the cheese, the butter and the bread from the little fridge and puts them on the table. She pours a cup of tea for Chingiz when he comes out of the shower. Chingiz gets dressed in a big hurry and only drinks his tea. He does not touch anything else that Ziba had put on the table.

They say nothing to each other. Chingiz goes to work.

Ziba would much rather go back to sleep but she has a lot to do. She changes the bed sheets and does the laundry. Half a day goes toward house chores as well as caring for and feeding Anahita.

About three o'clock in the afternoon the doorbell rings. She opens the door. She cannot believe her eyes. It is Hussein, her uncle.

She is thrilled to see him. As soon as he comes in, Ziba gives him a big hug and bursts into tears. She has found a shoulder to cry on. It is as if she has seen her guardian angel.

Hussein asks:

\- What is it child? Has something new happened that you want to tell me?

\- What can I say? Where do I start Uncle Hussein? I suffer. I am withering away in this life. What have I done that I am being punished so hard? This is not fair, Ziba says in a rough voice.

Hussein wants her to tell him everything that has happened since they last met.

After Ziba tells him all the horrific events that had thus far transpired, Hussein advises her that she should hang in there until he gets a hold of her parents. In order not to cause more grief for Ziba than what she has already gone through, Hussein cuts his visit short and leaves quickly. He does not want Chingiz to see him there. It went without saying how Chingiz would have reacted if he were to see Hussein there.

Despite everything that happened to him, Chingiz is at work. While at work, he calls Kobra to see if she knew anything about the funeral. She replies that the funeral was to be held the following week on Thursday at the cemetery. She also points out that she was going to be busy that day and could not come. Chingiz knows all too well why she is saying that. Kobra had no feelings for Sam. For her, Sam never existed. He felt like a burden to her.

In the evening when Chingiz comes home, he sees how tidy and clean the house is. The table is set and the smell of food from the kitchen has filled the room with its wonderful aroma.

He is hungry. Since today he does not want to come across as insensitive, he greets Ziba gently when he comes in and asks:

\- How is Anahita doing?

\- Good, thank goodness. She feels well and has been playing all day long. I put her to bed early so we can eat in peace and quiet, responds Ziba with a smile, which is nothing more than a pretence.

Chingiz takes off his coat.

It is a calm and peaceful dinner.

After dinner when Ziba is busy sewing Chingiz's jacket and Chingiz is drinking his tea, Ziba decides to ask him about the night when he came home so drunk. Ziba wanted to know what prompted him to go drinking and coming home intoxicated. Ziba knew that Chingiz liked his alcohol and could have easily become an alcoholic if only his body could have tolerated alcohol better.

Ziba does not want to start a fight so may be she should think things through before asking questions.

She is tired of this life that she has and hopes for a miracle. She thinks to herself that at that point in her life, perhaps her uncle Hussein is her only hope. But then she thinks:

Hope for what?

What if she gets divorced from Chingiz?

Can she go back to her parents?

Is it possible to live with them again?

What will people say about that?

What will happen to Anahita?

Would I be given the custody of Anahita or will Chingiz try to take her away from me?

What should I say to Anahita when she is grown up? She will surely ask about her father. She would want to know who her father is or was, and I am not even sure if he is going to be alive by then.

Oh . . . what a life. What should I do?

\- Ziba I want to talk to you, Chingiz breaks Ziba's train of thoughts and continues:

\- I want you to know that I have to go to a funeral next week. Someone who was close to me has died in an accident.

\- Who? Ziba asks curiously, wondering who it could be. This is one of the few rare times that Chingiz is talking about something personal and without Ziba's prompting or probing.

It is difficult for Chingiz to talk about Sam. But he must somehow do just that. He believes that the more he beats around the bush, the more complicated the situation will become. So he comes straight out and says:

\- It is difficult to explain. How should I begin? Sam, his wife and his daughter died in a train accident on the way back from their vacation.

The names do not ring a bell for Ziba. Who is Sam? She knows of no Sam. The fact is that she does not know anyone from her husband's side of the family except Kobra whose name she has heard repeatedly.

\- Who is Sam? Asks Ziba, hoping that he will answer her.

\- It is a bit complicated. You know that I am much older than you. (As if that was news to Ziba). And as such, I had a past before I married you.

Chingiz feels being caught between the rock and a hard place. It is always embarrassing and difficult to explain such things even if one is insensitive, cold and brazen. But he has now decided to tell it as it is. So he continues:

\- I had mentioned that I have another wife named Kobra. But before I married her, I had a child with another woman.

Ziba is dumbfounded but she remains dead silent to let him go on. She is not mad or angry. In light of everything that has happened, she has become accustomed to and prepared for hearing and seeing very strange and shocking things from Chingiz. To ensure that Chingiz does not change his mind and stop talking, she keeps quiet.

Chingiz sees how he has got Ziba's full attention. He sees how Ziba is sitting still and listening to him like a child whose father is about to tell her an interesting story. Chingiz is in a talkative mood and wants to, once and for all, come clean with her about his past.

Therefore, he tells her the whole truth about Sam, Kobra, Saaid, and Sara.

But Chingiz explains things in a way that would make Ziba feel sorry for him. In telling his sobbing story, he portrays himself as an innocent, helpless person who had no choice in the matter. He paints a picture of himself as a man whose life was filled with nothing more than sad moments and painful events.

He even talks about his parents and siblings.

Now Ziba knows almost everything about Chingiz since he has still not divulged anything about his nasty habits and extra-marital affairs, nor has he revealed who Sam's mother really was.

It is one-thirty in the morning. Both Chingiz and Ziba are exhausted. Neither one has the stamina to delve further into details.

However, to say that Ziba felt disappointed in what she learned about Chingiz would be an understatement. She knew now what she had really got herself into. Who Chingiz was then and who he is now have become clearer for Ziba. What is done is done, thinks Ziba. I have been dragged into all of this mess so far anyway and there does not seem to be a way out.

The week draws to a close without any other incidents or upheavals. Chingiz is calm and quiet. Is his calm state of being due to the fact that he has shared his secrets with Ziba and now she has got something on him? Hardly! Chingiz is not afraid of something like that. He has nothing to lose. So, maybe he is quieter because he has not yet got over the shock of losing Sam or the near loss of Anahita.

On Friday, it is time for Ziba to give Chingiz the weekly household-budget report and go through the item-by-item review of all the expenses with Chingiz. It is on Fridays that Ziba has to show him all the receipts for every single purchase and to receive next week's household allowance.

She has to list everything she buys in a book like this:

Monday, November 25:

Milk, 1 package, $3

Sugar, 1 package, $2

Salt, 1 package, $1

And so forth . . .

Ziba has no choice. She has to follow the dictator's rules in order not to be punished.

Another Friday comes along. Ziba has been in turmoil ever since the night Chingiz told her more about his past. Now she knows with certainty that Kobra is a part of his life as are a few others. At the same time, she feels sorry for what happened to Sam but the outrage she feels is beyond belief since she has become more aware of her husband's background, at least to the extent that Chingiz blurted out.

Chingiz wants Ziba to give him the weekly report on the household expenses. He is completely oblivious to Ziba's preoccupation with his past.

They sit at the table and go through the expenditures. Chingiz criticizes certain purchases as he finds them to be luxury items that were not needed.

The whole thing is ridiculous. I have to be a fool to comply with everything he says, Ziba says under her breath. Who in the world does he think he is? I must say my piece. The son of a b . . . has deceived me and my family from the very beginning. No, now I would either speak my mind or keep my mouth shut for the rest of my life.

She seems to have made up her mind about putting up a real fuss. As soon as Chingiz starts to whine, Ziba interrupts him and says:

\- Now, come on! What I have bought was absolutely necessary and had to be purchased. I am sick of the way you treat me. I think whatever you could not do to Kobra, you do to me. I want to . . .

Chingiz raises his hand and slaps her in the face. Chingiz has once again assaulted her and stopped her from speaking up, but this time is different. Ziba has found the courage to stand up to him.

This time, she is not going to take it quietly without giving Chingiz a piece of her mind.

\- You son of a b... I am sick and tired of being abused by you. I've had it with you and your stinking attitude. I am not your slave, you hear me you f...g pig.

She screams so loud that Anahita who is sitting on the floor and playing with her toys bursts into tears. The kerfuffle has frightened her not so much because she understands that they are fighting but because of the shouting and screaming that is going on. Chingiz is taken aback by Ziba's reaction. Perhaps he had mistakenly thought that he would have a free rein over Ziba forever. No matter what, he does not want the fight to escalate where the neighbors might hear them and get involved. He knows that if others become involved, it would be him who would be condemned.

No one will have any sympathy for him when they see how much older he is than Ziba and how he has destroyed a young girl's life. Should they also find out about his background, he is sure to be ridiculed by all and become the laughing stock of the whole world.

He also does not want to lose control of the situation. By the same token, he does not want to lose Ziba either.

He seems to be at a crossroad since the things he wants seem to be clashing with each other. After all, he cannot both love and hate someone at the same time. He must give Ziba some breathing room. She is a part of his life. He surely does not want to go back to Kobra now that he has got a taste of a better life.

Ziba cries. She curses Chingiz for everything he has done to her.

Chingiz tries to think of something he can threaten her with in order to silence her. He must find Ziba's weak point. He is skeptical that the threat of divorce would be a threat at all. But since he cannot think of anything else at that moment, he decides to use it and says:

\- Listen up, if you want to leave, go! Kobra was right to say that you were an ungrateful brat who just wanted to use me. If you are tired of this life, pack your f...g things and get out!

Ziba thinks for a few minutes. This is more than what she bargained for. Where would she go if she gets divorced? She is not sure whether Chingiz is bluffing or not, but she dares not call his bluff. In order not to lose face entirely, she responds tearfully:

\- You are a mean bastard. You have no morals, no conscience, and no shame. Where should Anahita and I go?

Chingiz jumps at the opportunity and cold-heartedly responds:

\- I did not say you could take Anahita with you. I said you are free to go.

Chingiz comes across as a tough, cold guy with a heart made of stone, but deep down inside he dreads the day that Ziba walks out on him.

Ziba who realizes that Anahita will be taken from her becomes extremely alarmed. She could never imagine leaving her child, especially in the hands of a moron like Chingiz.

With this threat hanging over her head, Ziba becomes completely silent and does not dare say anything else.

Chingiz sees how she retreated and as such, he is confident that he has now discovered Ziba's weakness, which he can use to keep her shackled in his service for many years to come. It is Anahita whom she loves and for whom she is willing to sacrifice everything including her own life.

Now that once again Chingiz has defeated his opponent, he goes right back to where they started and with a victorious look on his face, he tells Ziba:

\- Now, you do as I say! Or else . . .

Like a prey caught in the predator's clutches, she goes through the list of the household purchases without saying another word.

Saturday, Sunday, Monday, . . . and there comes Thursday, the day that Chingiz has to attend Sam's funeral. He has now come to better terms with the tragedy compared to the day he heard about it. He has managed to carry on. He could not afford to dwell on it for too long. Sure, he felt awful about what happened, but his feeling of sadness had really nothing to do with Sam per se, rather it had everything to do with him. He is afraid of dying. He is old. To him, it is obvious that he does not have a lot of years left. And that scares him to death.

One hurdle he must overcome today and have the courage to withstand is facing the grieving relatives and friends who will attend the service. He must meet with them face to face. Chingiz does not even know if Sam's mother is still alive or not.

To be sure though, the funeral is not going to awaken any sense of spirituality or remorse in Chingiz.

Like every other day Chingiz goes to work, but before leaving, he reminds Ziba that he will be going to the funeral later that afternoon. He also says that he will not be coming home for lunch.

Ziba takes the opportunity and as soon as Chingiz is gone, she gets ready and an hour later she is on her way to visit her uncle, Hussein. She has not heard anything from him and is anxious to learn what her uncle has been able to accomplish; whether he has been successful in getting in touch with her parents, and if so, what has been the outcome.

Hussein who rejoices at seeing Ziba would rather avoid her questions about her parents in order not to make her more disappointed than she already is. Ziba asks repeatedly if there were any new developments and if he has had a chance to speak with her parents, but her uncle keeps changing the subject and talks about issues that have nothing to do with what she is asking. Finally, when Ziba sees how her uncle dances around the issue, she interrupts him and asks:

\- Uncle Hussein, what is it? Why don't you answer my question?

Hussein can no longer avoid the subject since Ziba is rightly adamant to find out about her parents' response so, in a sympathetic way he says:

\- Dear child! I spoke with your parents a few days ago. Your mother, who is my own SISTER, explicitly stated that I should not meddle in your life. She added that you have no other alternatives. This was your own choice and you have to live with your husband. She advised that if you were to ever get separated, you cannot go live with them and you would have to take care of yourself.

This came as quite a blow to Ziba. She knew that her mother was not happy about her marriage but after all, it was not she who bore the full responsibility for that. Her mother and father were equally as guilty as she, or perhaps even more. Only if her father had not agreed to it. Only if he had not given his blessing and approval. Only if he had not gone through with consenting to her marriage in the hopes that Chingiz would help him financially and would find him employment. Or if her mother had at all cared about her, or had any concerns about her welfare instead of that of her own and her husband's, this would have never happened.

Children are bound to err but it is the parents, the adults, who are supposed to protect them, guide them, and prevent them from ruining their lives. What are parents for if they cannot love and protect their children from harm? If they cannot draw from their own experiences and mistakes to put their children on the right path in life? And if they cannot pave the way for their children to succeed?

Alas, that was not the case in Ziba's life. Her mother was an egoistic woman who only thought of herself, and her father was an ambivalent man who never achieved much in life. He was a worker-bee who kept toiling day in and day out to provide a meager life for his queen. That is the only thing he was good for. And much in the same way that a worker bee would sacrifice his life for his queen, so would he.

Ziba is crushed. She is reeling from the shock. Her only hope for any support in her situation was her family and that is entirely dashed. She is devastated. She has no tears left to cry anymore. She feels like she is at the end of her rope.

She heads back to her so-called home, a place that never felt like home to her. She is emotionally drained and she feels lost. On the way back, she thinks back at everything she has been through. She remembers how things were before. She thinks of her Saaid and her love for him. She thinks of how her simple life was destroyed partially by her own stupidity and partially by the carelessness of her parents.

On the other side of the town, there is Chingiz who ponders about his own problems. Soon, he will have to meet a lot of people. People who, at best, do not know him or, at worst, hate him. What if he runs into Sam's in- laws?

At first, he contemplates to not go to the funeral at all. What reason does he have to be there anyway? He had not seen Sam for a long time and most of the people at the funeral must have known about his strained relationship with his son too.

Who knows how Sam must have described his father to others? He might not have mentioned him at all or he may have pretended that his father was dead. Chingiz had absolutely not played any part in Sam's life. He was not at his graduation ceremony. He was not at his wedding. Upon reflection, Chingiz notices that he was never invited to any celebrations in Sam's life. Well, what can be done now? Not much. So, perhaps it is best to stay away. Sam is gone now and there is nothing he can do about that.

No, I do not want to go there. Forget it. He was nevertheless an illegitimate child, says Chingiz to himself as he sits alone in the store and after thinking things through.

At home, Ziba is busy cooking dinner. She knows that when Chingiz gets home, he will certainly want dinner. She feeds Anahita and plays with her after she is finished cooking. They have no television. Her cheap husband has kept her deprived of even something as insignificant as a television set.

Good thing that Ziba enjoys reading. Ziba reads the newspapers that Chingiz brings home. She reads them article-by-article. She has an inquisitive mind.

Since today she has some extra time, thanks to Chingiz not coming home early, she sits at the table and reads to her heart's content. Suddenly, she sees an interesting job advertisement in a sewing factory where they need people who can work from home and sew a few pieces of garment every week. Ziba hides the newspaper away and decides to contact them at a later time.

Chingiz comes home earlier than expected. As luck would have it, Ziba was busy dusting and tidying up at that moment. She was almost done with her chores.

As soon as Chingiz comes in, Ziba asks:

\- You are early! Were you not . . .

\- Yep, but the heck with it. I need food in my stomach, what is for dinner? Chingiz cuts her off as usual and picks up Anahita who had run over to him shouting "DADDY, DADDY."

Ziba sets the table and serves him his dinner. It was fortunate that Ziba had thought about making dinner. She is getting to know Chingiz's routine pretty well.

After Chingiz is full, he asks:

\- Have your parents tried to contact you yet?

Ziba is troubled by the question. She is worried that someone spied on her and informed Chingiz about her going out. She is mystified. What would be a sensible answer now? Should she honestly say what she had been up to or should she say nothing and see what happens next?

What she is unaware of is that Chingiz's question had to do with what had preoccupied him all day that is, the thoughts of his own relationship with Sam hence, the relationship between parents and children. His question was nothing more than pure curiosity to see if her parents were just as heartless as he had been toward his own children particularly, Sam.

Ziba cannot afford taking too long to come up with an answer. She has got to say something.

\- No, you scared them away. Don't you remember that? Ziba answers irately and sarcastically.

\- All right, don't get bent out of shape now! If they wanted you, they would have held on to you and stopped you from getting married to me. Chingiz replies with the intention of stopping her in her track.

For Ziba, what Chingiz said felt like a beheading in which the executioner does not even let the condemned person say his or her last words.

He was totally right though. If her parents cared for her, under no circumstances would they have ever agreed to this marriage.

It is heart breaking for Ziba to be reminded of that yet by another person. First, it was her uncle who told her what her mother had said and now, it is Chingiz who adds insult to injury.

Chingiz says no more. He knows how he has hit a nerve with her. He is good at rubbing salt in one's wounds.

It is late and since there is nothing else to talk about, he turns to Ziba and says:

\- I am tired; it's time to go to bed.

That pretty much means that every body else has to go to bed too. He is like that. If he wants to sleep so should Ziba and Anahita. They live in a one-room apartment. As such, there is no other room where Ziba and Anahita can go to and spend some time when they are not sleepy.

Chingiz takes off his clothes and goes to bed naked. Ziba suspects that he wants to be intimate that he crawls into bed so fast and without pajamas. She puts Anahita to bed and decides to go wash the dishes. She hopes that by ignoring Chingiz and making him wait, he would fall asleep. But the minute she turns around to go to the kitchen and wash the dishes, Chingiz yells out:

\- Hey you! Come to bed. I am more important than the f...g dirty dishes.

Ziba has to look forward to another awful night in bed.

At least, Anahita is resting calmly in her bed this time and will not get smacked by her loving father like the last time.

The next day, when Chingiz goes to work, Ziba gets herself and Anahita ready and goes out to make a phone call regarding that job advertisement she saw in the newspaper. She cannot make the call from any phone booth in the local area. She knows that she is constantly monitored by a few shopkeepers in the neighborhood. She goes a few blocks away and finds a public phone.
Chapter 8

Over the phone, she asks what the job entails and finds out all the details. But the employer wants to meet her for an interview.

First, Ziba thinks that perhaps it is not such a good idea to go for an interview. How would she even get to their office? But then, she thinks that she must turn things around and somehow rebuild her life. She cannot rely on Chingiz. He is ruthless and evil. He is not going to be any support for either her or Anahita. In addition, he is too old and might not even be around for long. She will be only thirty years old, for example, when he turns eighty. So it is best to think about her future now before it gets bleaker than it already is.

Ziba agrees to an appointment for Monday at ten in the morning and hopes that all goes well. She thinks that by ten o'clock, Chingiz would be long gone since he stars work early in the morning.

In the evening Chingiz comes home and the first question he asks is:

\- Where were you today?

Ziba is certain that someone has snitched on her again. It must have been one of Chingiz's spies in the neighborhood. Since she did have a heads up about this, thanks to the bigmouth Chingiz who had told her that he had people keeping an eye on her, she did not panic and responded:

\- Anahita was not feeling well so, I went to the pharmacy over at the next block. Have I committed any crime? Would his lordship want to punish me now?

Chingiz sees how Ziba has started to talk back at him in the same condescending fashion that he speaks to her. He is not happy about the change in Ziba's behaviour. He knows that sooner or later she will try to overcome him. Chingiz realizes how smart and energetic she is. That is what scares Chingiz. He is aware of how, in time, his stance will become weaker. He is only getting older while Ziba is flourishing into a young woman. With this in mind, he must sometimes swallow his pride and instead enjoy the moments he still has with his young wife.

To make a comeback at Ziba, Chingiz says:

\- You are becoming quite a comedian. I do not know you might have a lover. Or maybe you go to your family and learn a lot . . .

\- Do you listen to yourself? You are so corrupted that you think everyone is just as rotten as you, Ziba interrupts him to make him understand that everything has its limits.

Chingiz threatens once again to divorce her and to take Anahita away from her. But Ziba does not go silent this time and says:

\- No, you won't dare file for divorce. You know that you can't find someone like me, young and stupid. You are old and you know that no one wants you anymore. Not even your dear Kobra . . .

That was it for Chingiz. He takes off his belt and launches at her. He flogs Ziba something awful. Ziba tries to flee away from him, but there is nowhere to escape to. She is stuck in the corner of a one-room apartment and cannot escape the lashing she gets from the tyrant.

She screams and cries of pain. Anahita gets frightened and starts crying out loud as well. She does not understand the situation, but she gets afraid by the screaming and yelling of the adults. Chingiz gives Ziba a good beating while swearing at her and her entire family. Ziba begs for forgiveness and expresses regret over things she said.

When Chingiz gets tired from beating her up, he goes and sits down on the chair. Ziba sobs. The pain in her shoulders and back is excruciating. She is in shock physically and feels numb mentally.

The air is charged with a feeling of hatred and rage in that miserable dungeon of an apartment. No one makes a sound but Anahita who is crying incessantly while sitting on the floor and looking at Ziba. She looks horrified.

Ziba sits hunched over by the wall. She breathes heavily and cries quietly.

Chingiz is out of breath. Considering his age, he cannot unleash fury on someone without paying a price for it himself. But that is what happens when a person is aggressive, sadistic and brutal and wants to maintain his dominance over another person at all costs.

After that sickening episode, Chingiz goes out. But before he leaves, he turns around to Ziba and says:

\- I will file for divorce on Monday. You can go to hell.

After he leaves, Ziba gets up despite the pain she feels all over her ravaged body. She holds Anahita in her arms to calm her down. She lies down with Anahita in her arms and goes into deep thoughts. Her ears are ringing, her head is pounding, and her body is aching beyond belief. She can hear how her heart beats heavily in her chest. She turns to Anahita and whispers:

\- It is horrible that every single day, I have to be subjected to so much abuse. Poor thing, why did I bring you into this cruel world? Why did I put you through the misery that I created for myself?

There is no sign of Chingiz all weekend. Ziba is certain that he is at Kobra's. But she could not care less. All she is concerned about is to find a way out of that rat hole, which she has to call home.

What is interesting is that Ziba does not know that Chingiz cannot afford moving to a larger apartment. She does not know that he is in debt now and cannot do anything about it. Ziba knows nothing about the loan since Chingiz's mail goes to Kobra's address. Chingiz has not changed his address since he got married to Ziba; rather, he is still registered at Kobra's address.

Ziba is so naïve that she does not even wonder why there are no mail for Chingiz. She is too young and inexperienced to figure these things out for herself.

Ziba is worried about what Chingiz said about divorcing her though. Since she suspects that he is staying at Kobra's, she is worried that Kobra will add more fuel to the fire and encourage him to go for a divorce. Yet, Ziba cannot do a thing about that. All she can do is to wait and see what unpleasant surprises fate has in store for her.

Ziba and Anahita spend two days alone. Thanks to Chingiz's absence, Ziba manages to tend to herself and Anahita and go about doing her household chores.

Sunday evening Mr. Chingiz returns home. He comes in and waits for Ziba to greet him. Ziba, who is busy reading Friday's newspaper, lifts her head up and looks at him for a moment but just as quickly, she gazes back at the newspaper. Anahita however, runs to her father, making noises and wanting to be held by him. Chingiz lifts her up and gives her a kiss. Chingiz, who sees how indifferent Ziba acts toward him, says:

\- Hey, YOU! Have you not missed me? Don't you want to know where I have been? Or have you learned your lesson now?

Ziba completely ignores him. She does not even look at him.

\- You, insolent you! It appears that you did not believe me when I said I would go to the court tomorrow and put an end to this marriage. You know what happens then. You are going to lose Anahita and me, and . . .

Ziba interrupts him there because she sadly knows that he is right. The fact that she has no job, no place to live and that she is too young, she surely would not be given the custody of Anahita. And that would be too painful for her to handle. She is demoralized and she has no choice but to be appeasing. As such, she says:

\- Chingiz, you disappear for two days without reason. Why can't we talk to each other? Why must we fight all the time? I love you. You are my husband and I have no one else but you. Do you hate me so much? Do you really want to get rid of me?

She says all of this with tears in her eyes. She is clearly upset and scared. She gives her life for Anahita. Anahita is the only reason that keeps her going. Now when her parents and relatives are driven away because of Chingiz and now when she knows that she has to struggle with an impossible, domineering husband all alone and by herself, she does not want to worry about losing Anahita on top of everything else as well.

\- No, I love you. You are my angel. But you have to be obedient toward me and without question. Otherwise, I cannot support you. That is the only way that our marriage can go on, says Chingiz victoriously based on what he heard from Ziba.

That evening comes to pass without a fight. Chingiz is thrilled and thinks that Ziba has got a wake-up call. Ziba, on the other hand, is happy that she escaped another round of abuse and that perhaps, she succeeded to change his mind about divorce.

For now, Ziba's first priority is to get a job and she needs to only concentrate on that rather than the thought of moving to another place as she so badly wanted in the past. So far, she has managed to put a meager saving together by means of taking small amounts from the measly weekly allowance that Chingiz gives her. It is from that tiny saving that she pays for telephone calls, bus tickets, and other personal necessities.

Chingiz wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to make love; albeit for him, the word love is a foreign word. Ziba, who was in deep sleep, sees in her dreams that she has crawled into a cement duct and has got stuck in the middle of it. She cannot crawl forward or backward to get herself out. She feels like she is being suffocated, as the duct gets smaller in diameter, crushing her. She wakes up of the pain she felt while dreaming only to find that Chingiz is about to get on with his business.

\- Wait! What are you doing? Says Ziba furiously.

Chingiz does what he wants and as usual, ignores Ziba's protest.

Early in the morning Chingiz wakes up and Ziba has to fix him breakfast.

She feels tired and sluggish, but given that she has an appointment today with the employer at the clothing factory, she must see to it that Chingiz goes to work; as well, she must get herself ready and go to the appointment.

Her body is aching all over, and there are scars on her back. She also has bruises on parts of her body and on her face.

When Chingiz is on his way out, he leaves twenty dollars on the table and says:

\- Do not forget to show me last week's shopping list tonight. We did not go through it on Friday.

\- Sure, sure, Ziba says quickly just to get him out of the house.

While getting ready, Ziba wonders if anything would ever change Chingiz into a better man. But, that would be an impossible transformation. If the tragic death of his son, Sam, and the shock of Anahita's temporary disappearance could not get him to change, how could anything else? There is absolutely nothing that can ever make Chingiz a decent human being.

Ziba goes to the address she was given over the phone to meet with her future employer. It is a big clothing factory located in the suburb where about a hundred people work.

When she arrives, the man who is supposed to meet with her cannot believe his eyes; a young woman with a toddler who has taken the trouble in that cold weather to come all the way out to the suburb to look for a job.

Ziba, who liked the voice she heard over the phone the first time she called, is further pleased when she meets the guy in person and finds out that her instincts were right about him.

\- Hi, I'm Ziba who called you about the job advertisement, she says with a smile.

\- Hi, I am Ramin. Where do you live? You must be quite a way from home! Is this your child? Ramin asks.

He is puzzled by the fact that such a young girl has a kid and that she has come all this way in the hopes of getting a job.

\- If you had said where you lived, I could have come to you instead. It must have been difficult to come by bus in this weather especially with a child, continues Ramin.

It seems that Ramin already likes Ziba. At times, one tends to get attracted to another person without any reasons. It is not love, no; it is not love at first sight, but a kind of affection one feels towards someone else.

Moreover, Ziba is not that bad looking either. She is an attractive girl who has had absolutely no luck when it came to choosing a life-partner.

Ramin is a student who is in his last year of studying psychology. He studies mostly through correspondence and works full time to pay for his education.

He is twenty-three years old, a hundred and eighty-five centimeters long with dark hair, a handsome guy with black eyes and a well-built figure. There is a certain sense of maturity in his mannerism and in his way of talking that is quite appealing.

Ramin is very observant. He does notice the bruises on Ziba's face and he sees the expression of pain in Ziba's face; all thanks to the generosity of the man who gave her quite a beating without holding anything back.

\- I am here to work as seamster. What is it . . .

\- Yes, I know. Come; let me show you the place. Would you like something to drink? And Ramin continues: Are you married?

He has not even got an answer to his first question when he asks the next one. He is anxious and is dying to find out more about Ziba.

Ziba has no objections that such a nice guy is interested to know her better. She takes it as a compliment. She is reminded of the time when she met that creature, Chingiz, who actively pursued her. The doomed memories of a time in her life that she rather forget and wish she could erase from her past for good.

In order not to hurt Ramin and make him feel awkward, Ziba answers his questions without getting into any details:

\- Yes, I am married. This is my child, Anahita. I live far from here.

Ramin smiles and says:

\- Sorry, I did not want to pry into your life. I did not mean to be nosy.

\- No, no, don't worry about it! I have no problems with it, answers Ziba cheerfully.

After Ramin takes Ziba on a tour of the factory and explains to her what the job entails, he asks Ziba:

\- Well, what do you think? Do you think you can deal with sewing and be happy with this type of work? I can assure you that we will help you with resources.

\- Yes, it seems to be all right. I only have one problem, which I am not sure how to solve.

\- What can it be?

\- Sewing machine. I don't have a sewing machine at home and it is not cheap to buy one. I have no means of buying something like that.

Ramin does not ask whether her husband could get her a sewing machine or not. With the bruises on her face and her overall demeanor, it is not hard for Ramin to get the picture that her husband is anything but caring or supportive.

So far, Ramin has not dared to ask Ziba about those black and blue markings on her face. Although, he has a good idea whose handy work it must be.

\- What do you say we give you a good sewing machine? Says Ramin.

He knows that it is possible to make an exception and get a sewing machine for her. There are already a number of those in stock that are in good condition and are not needed by anyone at the moment.

The offer makes Ziba so happy that to thank Ramin, she, automatically, hugs him and gives him a kiss on the cheek.

Ramin appreciates Ziba's reaction to the news, even though it might not have been the most professional way to react.

Ziba realizes how she got caught up in the moment and hugged Ramin. So, she quickly steps back and says:

\- Oops, sorry. I was so ecstatic that my dream had come true, I reacted unconsciously and I did not mean anything by it.

\- Not at all. Shall we go to the office, get a sewing machine for you, and write up the contract? Ramin replies.

Ziba signs the contract in accordance with which she would sew garments on factory orders at home. The material for each order is to be delivered to her at home. In addition, the company would arrange for the pick up of the finished work upon Ziba's notice of completion.

The more she sews the more money she earns.

According to the contract she stands to earn ten dollars per garment, which is great news to her. She hopes to be making good money from this job.

As she gets ready to leave, Ramin offers her a ride. He is concerned that she would not be able to carry the heavy sewing machine that she just received while at the same time, carrying her baby.

Ziba has absolutely nothing against him giving her a ride, although she knows that the neighbors will certainly snitch on her. Ziba is so excited that she could not care less about anything else at that moment.

As nice of a guy as Ramin is, his offer is not entirely altruistic. He has fallen for Ziba. Right from get-go, a certain kind of friendship started to flourish between them. They both appear to be drawn to each other.

On the way home, Ramin can no longer contain his curiosity and asks Ziba:

\- Can I ask you a question?

Ziba is sitting with Anahita on the back seat of the car, and she is thinking about the consequences of neighbors seeing Ramin and reporting back to Chingiz. Should she ask Ramin to drop them off at the intersection once they get closer, or should she let him keep driving all the way up to her apartment building? She is afraid that those who help Chingiz by keeping an eye on her will see Ramin and make a mountain out of a molehill. Who knows what Chingiz would do to her if he gets to hear this?

\- Sorry? What did you say? Ziba is so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she did not hear Ramin's question.

\- Well, I wonder if I could ask you a personal question.

\- Sure!

\- You might think that I am being nosy. I do not want to be rude, but I wonder how you got your bruises. Does your husband beat you up?

Now these are sensitive and very personal questions that Ramin asks. Ziba knew that sooner or later he would ask her about it. The almost faded-away trace of her black eye, for example, is, nonetheless, still visible. There was nothing she could do to hide it or cover it up with something. No amount of make up would have helped to mask it.

She does not want to be impolite. Anyone looking at her will know that these bruises are nothing but signs of abuse. Therefore, for once, she confides in a total stranger and talks about her life.

\- Yes, my husband is a vicious and brutal man who beats me up whenever he feels like it and for no reason. He is quite a lot older than me. I wrecked my life when I married him.

Ramin is saddened by what he hears while at the same time he feels overcome by rage towards the man who inflicts pain on a helpless woman. A woman who any other man would have felt lucky to have as his wife.

\- I'm really sorry to hear that. But from now on, you do not have to be scared. If you need anything, you now have me as a friend to turn to. What is the name of the man who did this to you?

Ramin's promise of friendship and his pledge to support her in the future warm Ziba's heart. For the first time in a long time, she feels like she belongs somewhere and to someone. She has been tormented and tortured for so long. She has been deprived of everything decent in life including her freedom. She has been robbed of her pride, dignity and youthful joy. She sighs of relief when she hears Ramin mention the word friendship and shows her the compassion she so badly needs in such a difficult time in her life.

\- Yes, thanks, I am alone in this cruel world. Ironically enough, the only one I had until today was the monster I fear the most that is, my so-called "husband" Chingiz. Can I ask you to drop us off at the junction here instead of driving up to my apartment building? Chingiz has asked people in the neighborhood to keep an eye on me and inform him of what I do and where I go during the day.

\- Sure, but how are you going to take the sewing machine with you. It is heavy.

\- You are right. I never thought about that. I have no choice, so be it, even though I will pay the price. If he finds out that a young man has dropped me off at the house, he will surely fly off the handle and all hell will break loose.

Ramin, who hears her say that, changes his mind and would rather let her get off at the junction. He does not want her to suffer inadvertently because of a good deed that someone else wanted to do for her. But at the same time, Ramin knows that he would have to come by once in a while to bring her the sewing orders so, he asks:

\- So, how are we going to do this then when I have to come by your place and drop off the sewing material?

Ziba, who has no idea how this is all going to turn out, tells Ramin that she will have to somehow make it work. She believes that she has no choice but to take that risk. And on that note, she asks Ramin to drop her off at her place. She has come to accept that she might as well face the music right off the bat.

Ramin drops her off at her place and tells her he will be back in two days with the material.

Ziba hides the sewing machine under the bed. She does not want Chingiz to know anything about it. She is determined to earn a living so as build a future for herself and Anahita.

In the evening Chingiz comes home, and as he had commanded in the morning, he wants to go through last week's expenditures.

Ziba figures that the neighborhood "watchdogs" had not blabbed to Chingiz about her yet, or else he would have raised hell to find out where she had gone that day and with whom she had been.

From that evening on, Ziba decides not to argue with Chingiz anymore and to avoid getting into conflicts with him. She also drops the whole conversation about getting a new apartment for the time being. That subject is something that she can bring up much later when she has acquired some level of financial stability on her own.

Now Ziba has found a pillar of support in her life, Ramin, whom she can trust. It has been a long while since anyone has afforded her any sympathy or shown her any kindness. Ever since she married Chingiz, she has not felt anything other than animosity and malice directed at her.

Ramin is somewhat drawn to Ziba. He probably feels sorry for such a young and beautiful girl who has to live such a horrible life. Ramin is going to be a psychologist soon and his knowledge in that field might have had something to do with his deeper appreciation of Ziba's pain and his feelings of sympathy towards her.
Chapter 9

As planned, Ramin drops off the necessary material at Ziba's. He personally delivers the stuff to Ziba although there are staff whose job include performing such tasks. He and Ziba had determined in advance that given her circumstances, it would be best for him to drop off the material at her place.

From that day on, Ramin shows up once a week with or without a sewing order or material.

Chingiz could not care less about the reason for Ziba's sudden change of attitude. He is just happy as long as he has got her under his total control. And so long as she does not make any demands of him and ask for anything, then there is no reason for Chingiz to make waves and rock the boat.

Each time Ramin shows up at Ziba's, she feels glad and delighted while at the same time, she becomes more worried and nervous.

Glad to meet a friend who is willing to help her with her difficult ordeal. But worried that Chingiz might find out about her secret, something that would be catastrophic.

She does not want to miss her only chance in life to secure her future. Despite everything, she has high hopes for the future.

But reckless meddling in others' lives is something that some people love to do. Despicable creatures who have no conscience and revel in others' misery and suffering.

One evening Chingiz comes home. He is absolutely mad. He has got his hands clenched in a fist ready to pummel his victim with utter force.

He looks at Ziba and while shouting a lot of profanities at her, he asks her with whom she is sleeping. He threatens to kill her for having an affair.

Ziba, who had fully anticipated this day to come, calmly responds:

\- I know what your informants must have told you. It probably involves the person who had a wrong address and mistakenly knocked on our door today, the same one you are referring to. Did those who so enthusiastically reported this to you not see that he did not come in the house? Did you not receive a full report that he left just as quickly? Do you really think I am that kind of a person to commit adultery?

Maintaining her composure, Ziba remains seated while Chingiz stands right above her like an executioner.

Chingiz is so full of rage that he ignores Anahita shouting at him "Dad, Hi!" She tugs at her father's coat to get his attention to no avail. The only thing Chingiz is focused on is Ziba's reaction. He believes he is an expert at telling whether someone is lying or not based on the person's body language.

Remaining calm and collected, Ziba continues:

\- The day I gave my word "till death do us part," I made a commitment for life. So, my life is yours. My heart and soul are Anahita's. I have no intentions of cheating on you.

Chingiz does not know what to make of Ziba's statements. But it seemed to have worked since he feels a little less outraged.

Chingiz seems to have been convinced of Ziba's innocence by the way she reacted and responded. He feels confident that Ziba has not yet done anything wrong and for now, she is innocent.

Nonetheless, the seeds of mistrust have now been planted in Chingiz's mind more firmly. After all, Kobra had in the past tried to make Chingiz suspicious toward Ziba. So, bewildered by what he thinks and what he feels, he goes through another outburst and tells Ziba:

\- I know you have a lover. I will take care of him in due time.

Then, Chingiz rushes out of the apartment and pounds on one of the neighbor's door. They are a middle-aged couple with two children, a daughter and a son. The man is a bank employee and his wife is a social worker. It was at their place where Anahita had once ended up and had caused a huge uproar.

The neighbor opens the door, looking disturbed as to who bangs on their door.

\- I am tired of life. My wife has a lover, says Chingiz heatedly.

\- Excuse me!

The neighbor is at a complete loss. He is taken aback by what a total stranger has come to share with him. While baffled, the neighbor says hesitantly:

\- I don't understand why you are telling me this. I don't even know you so, I don't understand why you have come to me and what is it you want me to do?

\- I cannot live like this. She has tricked me. She wants me dead despite everything I have done for her. Chingiz replies while trying to make a case for himself.

Ziba, who has not even come out of the apartment, continues reading her newspaper. She knows that no one will take him seriously or lay any blames on her. Everyone can obviously see how crazy he is. No one will take his side. Surely deep down inside, they feel disgusted at the way an overbearing, old man treats his young wife.

The neighbor is speechless, but to be neighborly, he tells him:

\- No, Mr. Chingiz, you are mistaken. Your wife is a nice young girl. It will all work out. You are upset and that is why you are talking this way. You must be thrilled to have such a young wife.

Chingiz knows that he is not going to gain anything by rambling on. Not much can be done, the battle is lost. He turns around. As he walks away from the neighbour's apartment, he mumbles:

\- You don't understand. She wants to kill me. She will be the end of me.

He comes back to the apartment like a total loser. He realizes how old and worn out he is getting and how he has no leg to stand on when it comes to complaining about his wife to people.

Now he is sure that people will not take his side once they know how old Ziba is and how much younger she is.

Ziba is calm, cool, and collected. She does not want to cause further uproar. It is true that Chingiz cannot get people's sympathy, but he can file for divorce. That is not something that Ziba is ready for, at least not right now.

Chingiz sits down at the dining table, looks at Ziba and says:

\- It makes no sense to continue like this. I have made a mistake. This marriage will be the end of me if it continues. I am . . .

\- What is wrong with you Chingiz? Who said that I have been with someone else? Calm down. When I have been putting up with this life all this time, why should I want to wreck it now? Those who filled your head up with a bunch of nonsense about me are not your friends. They are bunch of people who are probably jealous of you. Do not be so gullible.

She cuts Chingiz off like that because she wants to stop him from talking or thinking about divorce. Regardless of how horrible this marriage is, she needs to hold on to it for now. She has no one to turn to. She has nowhere else to go. And worst of all, she will lose her child. So, it is best to stay put and bear with Chingiz until the day she can afford to make her own decisions about her life and that of Anahita's.
Chapter 10

Winter is finally coming to an end. It is a bright and somewhat chilly day in late March.

Soon comes the New Year. There air is filled with love and joy everywhere. Streets and alleys are decorated with new-year decorations and lit up with candles and lights. The snow has melted away and the trees have started to show signs of rejuvenation. People are more active than in previous months. They rush in and out of different stores to do their new-year shopping. Children belong to the happiest category of all at such festive time of the year.

But for Ziba and her Anahita there does not seem to be a New Year celebration. Anahita must learn the bitter truth that she cannot expect any special treatment or even a lousy gift from Chingiz. Ziba has no hope for any change in Chingiz's behavior, although one never knows. Ziba keeps busy with her sewing orders surreptitiously, and Chingiz is the same way as he has always been, mostly in a bad mood.

With time, the bond between Ramin and Ziba strengthens. Ramin delivers the sewing material and orders to Ziba personally. She is the only one for whom Ramin does such a favour.

So far, Chingiz has no clue about Ramin's existence. But he has his suspicions. His head is filled with toxic comments made by Kobra, who would like nothing more than to break up their marriage in anyway possible.

What is interesting is that Saaid is not a part of this conspiracy. He is, to certain extent, like his deceased stepbrother, Sam. Saaid focuses his time and energy on his own life.

Sara is more like her mother, Kobra. In most cases, she takes her mother's side particularly, in situations where Chingiz is the opposing party.

In a matter of few months, Ziba has become quite skilled in her new job. She has made an impression on and has proven her potential to her employer to the point that she now gets more sophisticated sewing orders and earns more money. She is quite satisfied with what she makes. Of course, Ramin must have had a hand in that, but Ziba is not a bad seamster either.

As Anahita is now a bit older than one and can understand more of what goes on around her, Ziba wants to hold a little new-year party for her sake. She knows that Chingiz will not go along with that but she has to somehow get him to agree to it. After all, they only have one child together and for her, she is her first child. The thought of having only one child prompts Ziba to think why she has not become pregnant after Anahita. First, she worries, but then given Chingiz's age and the natural aging process, she thinks that perhaps it is Chingiz who is no longer able to have kids.

Upon reflection, she is glad that she has not had any more children. One is enough, she thinks to herself. What would I have done with another kid in this atrocious life? To bring another one into this life so he/she could be subjected to Chingiz's cruelty? Moreover, more kids would have meant getting more tied down to this life. No, she thinks, had I been as mature then as I am now, I would have not made any children with him at all. But now what is done is done; I love the one that I have, but I do not wish for more.

Ironically enough, thoughts of having more children had recently occurred to Chingiz as well. However in his case, the idea was more or less planted in his head by his friend at work. Based on Chingiz's constant complaining about Ziba, his friend had advised him to have more children with Ziba so as to tie her further down in life and make her less appealing to other man.

Unfortunately that was a habit of Chingiz to go around painting a dark picture of Ziba in front of anyone who was willing to listen. Those, who had never met Ziba and did not know her, were inclined to take Chingiz's side and sympathize with him. Perhaps, it would have been best if people could stop meddling in other people's lives regardless of how good their intentions might be.

Ziba wants to discuss her ideas for a new-year party with Chingiz but does not know how to bring it up so as not to create a situation.

Ever since Ziba started working, she has tried to avoid getting into any confrontations with Chingiz. She has not made any demands or asked for anything. She has not argued with Chingiz; and, she has not denied him anything. Ziba has complied with and pleased Chingiz in every respect.

Spring has finally arrived. It is end March. There is a spring fever everywhere. It is time for mild weather, more sun and heat. All plants are going to bud soon.

Ziba wants to throw a small party for Anahita's sake at home. First, she thinks of inviting the neighbors. But that is not possible. From the time they moved in, Ziba was absolutely forbidden by Chingiz to never communicate or socialize with any of the neighbors. It also did not help that the neighbours wanted to keep their distance from them ever since Chingiz went to one of them complaining about Ziba having an affair. Chingiz has pretty much scared away the neighbors.

So, all that Ziba can do is to have a small party with just her, Anahita and Chingiz.

In the evening when Chingiz comes home, Ziba asks whether it would be all right to have a little party for their daughter's sake. Oddly enough, Chingiz does not object and says:

\- Sure, let us have a celebration for our little princess, but with only the three of us.

Ziba is surprised that Chingiz even agreed to it. But now that he says O.K, one must act quickly before he changes his mind.

One evening then, Ziba prepares a small feast along with a small cake. She grabs her little, cheap camera that she had received as a birthday present from her father before she met Chingiz. She takes a few pictures. She still has a roll of film in the camera from a long time ago. The evening, though simple, is an unforgettable one for Ziba. It is the first time there were any celebrations of any kind in that miserable, dark dungeon of a place she had to call home.

A week goes by and things are going smoothly in Ziba's life. She has her work and gets to meet Ramin on those occasions that he drops off new orders or picks up finished garments.

For a little while then, everything had been calm and quiet. But Kobra, who is not sitting idle and is consumed with Chingiz's marriage to Ziba, is determined to break up his marriage. She must see to it that Ziba is out of Chingiz's life for good. So, she has an eye on what goes on in Ziba's life in a more vigilant manner than Chingiz.

Since Chingiz is too stupid to realize who his friends are and who his enemies are, he talks to Kobra all the time and tells her everything that happens at home. Kobra seems to have put a spell on Chingiz in order for Chingiz to have so much trust in her. So, Kobra knows what Ziba does and how she and Anahita have it at all times. She knows Chingiz's weaknesses and those of Ziba's.

Now that Anahita is bit older, Kobra is curious as to whether Chingiz is thinking of having another baby. Kobra also wonders why Ziba, who is young, has not got pregnant again. To stir up the pot, Kobra takes up the issue with Chingiz at one of Chingiz's regular visits and asks:

\- Why is Ziba not pregnant again? Maybe she can't have more children. Could it be that she has gone to a doctor and got herself sterilized without your knowledge?

Chingiz's blood starts to boil at Kobra's insinuations and he replies back:

\- She knows what I will do to her if she does something like that without talking to me about it first.

Kobra says no more. She knows that the groundwork for a new clash is laid down. And she was right on.

With her innuendos, Chingiz's mind goes into overdrive turning him into a fire-breathing dragon, green with envy and hatred.

By the time he leaves Kobra, he cannot think about anything else but to confront Ziba about why she has not become pregnant after Anahita. Is it true that she went to a doctor without the permission of her Lord, for God help her if that is the case?

On the way home he thinks hard and draws hasty conclusions about why she was seen to be going out so many times by those informants who keep him apprised of Ziba's every move. He convinces himself that Ziba must have been to a doctor in one of those times that she had ventured out.

Ziba, unaware that soon her whole world is going to crumble, is busy sewing away. She had no idea that Chingiz was going to have lunch with Kobra that day.

The front door opens up and all unexpectedly, Chingiz appears in the doorway. He does not notice what Ziba is doing. He does not even see the sewing machine and all the sewing material lying on the floor around her. The only thing he sees is an impostor who, in his eyes, has committed a despicable act for which she must be punished.

Ziba is shocked to see him. She panics and feels like she is going to pass out. She does not know why Chingiz is home at that hour of the day and why he stares at her like that. She is terrified by the dreadful way he looks at her. She can tell that something awful is about to happen to her.

Initially, Ziba gets worried about her sewing business. Now that Chingiz has seen the sewing machine, she thinks that the jig is up and she should say goodbye to her dreams. She is frantic and wonders what story she can come up with to explain all of that.

\- I can explain, says Ziba with trembling voice and continues: The fact is that . . .

\- Shut up. I know what it is. Do not start with your lies and baloney excuses. When did you do it? Chingiz interrupts Ziba heatedly and waits for a response.

Ziba is talking about one thing while Chingiz is talking about something else. The question is how and when one of them will catch on as to what is going on.

\- Yes, a few months ago. But it would benefit us all if I . . .

\- Oh indeed it does! But who gave you permission? Why wasn't I consulted about it? Who do you take me for anyway? Did you think that I was not going to find out about it at some point? This time it is over for you. Forget Anahita and this life . . .

\- No Chingiz, I beg you to listen to what I have to say. It is not what you think.

\- I know. There is nothing to think about. Kobra was right. She is smart. She cares about me.

She knew what a con artist you were. You did not want to have more children and so, without my permission you went ahead and got yourself fixed. I will show you . . .

\- Wait, wait! What on earth are you talking about? Who said I have done that? Where did you get such a dumb idea? I haven't done anything like that. Get a grip and listen to what I am saying! I have not had gone through any procedures or surgeries.

Chingiz quiets down. He is silent. Is that for real? He has been wrong! What is he going to say now? He sits down.

Ziba realizes that his rage was not caused by what he saw on the floor. No, he has not even noticed that a sewing machine is on the floor with a bunch of fabric and other material around it. She understands that Kobra had, once again, been busy filling his head with rubbish to turn him against her.

Well it seems that Kobra's ploy failed miserably since Ziba was telling the truth, which could be verified if needed. But Ziba is not out of the woods yet. She waits for Chingiz's reaction once he, who was blinded by rage, starts getting his senses back and take note of everything that is in the middle of the floor.

At that instance, Anahita, who was sitting in the corner and playing, stands up and goes toward her father. She paces around her father like a butterfly around candles to draw her father's attention to her.

Good thing Chingiz is in a calm state now when Anahita is standing close to him.

He notices Anahita beside him. He turns to her. He looks at his little girl as if he has never really had the time nor the desire to see how his little angel looks like. He is moved and wants eagerly to hold his little girl in his arms.

Chingiz reaches out to Anahita and says:

\- Come my little angel. Come to Dad!

He is suddenly overtaken by fatherly love. Perhaps the thought of not being able to have another child—thanks to Kobra's insinuations—must have been devastating for him. Anahita was, for now, the last child he had.

Chingiz who has never cared much for his children including Anahita, is now interested in having more children. Why? Well, for a brief moment he thought that he did not have that option anymore. In addition, Chingiz has his own reasons for wanting more children with Ziba. He believes that with more children, Ziba will be too busy to look for someone else and besides, who would want to get involved with a woman who has children.

Now that Chingiz is calmer, he notices the sewing machine and asks Ziba:

\- What is that?

Ok, it is time for the real fight, Ziba thinks. What is she going to say? But before she has time to formulate an answer, Chingiz screams and says:

\- I asked you a simple question, what the hell is that?

The volcano is acting up again. He puts Anahita down and stands up. Anahita starts to cry when she, the little innocent child, hears her insane father scream. She is too young to understand that her deranged father did not yell at her rather, at poor Ziba.

There is no way Ziba can ignore the question. She must answer before she gets beaten up. Chingiz starts swearing and clenching his fist. Ziba quickly crawls over to the corner of the room, the same spot where she sits hunched over to protect herself from getting punched or whipped by Chingiz.

Chingiz comes closer and asks her again:

\- What is this? Will you answer or should I beat the answer out of you?

\- It's a sewing machine that I rented in order to sew a few clothes for Anahita. We cannot afford to buy clothes for her. So, I thought this would be cheaper, says Ziba hunched over with her hands covering her head.

Chingiz says:

\- Why didn't you tell me that before?

\- Because I got it today. And ever since you got home, I haven't got a chance to say anything about it.

She was correct about that. Since the moment Chingiz set foot in the house, he had been busy fighting with her over her having supposedly had a surgery without his knowledge. He has already made a fool of himself once and he would rather not go down that road again. He goes back to his chair and sits down. Surprisingly enough, he seems to be a bit embarrassed by the way he reacted. He thinks that what Ziba said makes a lot of sense. If she can sew clothes for Anahita and save him money then, why not let her do it? Chingiz also finds sewing a good means of keeping Ziba busy at home. So in his mind, it is a win-win situation. He saves money and keeps her at home hence, killing two birds with one stone.

Being a suspicious person by nature who does not trust anyone, he definitely has more questions about the sewing machine. However due to his preoccupation with Ziba's ability or inability to get pregnant, he cannot be bothered with much else for the time being so, he tells Ziba:

\- I demand an explanation from you about the sewing machine later. First, we will go to a doctor tomorrow to get you examined. I have to be sure.

Ziba, who has nothing to worry about, does not make any objections. She is just glad that Chingiz did not beat her up and for once, she skipped getting mauled.

The next day Chingiz, Ziba and Anahita go to the doctor.

It is a nice weather. The sun shines like a glowing ball in the sky. No signs of clouds are visible in the entire blue sky. Such a great day should have been devoted to going on a picnic and having fun instead of torturing one's family over nonsense.

Ziba is calm. She knows that she is not barren. Anahita seems to be her usual happy self. She is a child who needs to enjoy her childhood, if only Chingiz permits that. By contrast, Chingiz is restless. He has his suspicions and thinks that soon the truth about Ziba's sinful deed will be revealed. He is not afraid of scandals. To drag his young and innocent wife to the doctor just out of suspicion is fine by him. Someone who refused to take her to the doctor during the course of her pregnancy or while in labour has no qualm doing just that over rubbish. Who knows what could have happened to Ziba if she had run into any complications during the pregnancy or the delivery.

At the doctor's, Chingiz claims that he wants to find out why Ziba has not become pregnant since her first child was born. The doctor is a man in his forties. First, he needs to know who is who? He must fill out a report first so, he asks:

\- What is your relationship to each other?

Chingiz cannot dodge the question here. He must tell the doctor who he is.

\- I am . . . , I am her husband, says Chingiz briskly.

The physician looks surprised, as he cannot believe his ears. He pauses for a second and asks Ziba:

\- At which hospital did you give birth and who was your doctor? I need to see your medical file before I can do much.

Now Chingiz starts getting agitated and losing his patience with all these questions.

Which doctor? Which hospital? What will he say now? That he was too cheap to take his wife to see a doctor. That he did not want to spend any money not even for something that had to do with his wife's and his child's wellbeing. No doubt, he has a hard time admitting to it. While someone can become stingy over the years, Chingiz was like that from the beginning.

Before Ziba gets a chance to open her mouth and answer the doctor's questions, Chingiz says:

\- Forget it! We are sorry to have come to you. I didn't know we would have to go through an interrogation.

He then turns around to Ziba and tells her: Let's go!

Chingiz's overreaction to a couple of routine questions takes the doctor by surprise. But then again, he finds the whole thing bizarre that is, an odd couple who do not seem to be at all compatible with each other.

He is not quite sure how to respond, but he turns around to Chingiz and says:

\- It is quite okay if you do not want me to contact your previous doctor. It would have made my job easier, but we can do without.

He says that in order to get Chingiz to agree to a medical examination of Ziba. He is now curious about what made Chingiz so nervous. Why did Chingiz not want him to contact their doctor? What is really going on anyway? How . . .

Many questions start to go through the doctor's head now. He believes that to get the answers then, it is best to meet their or more precisely, Chingiz's conditions since Ziba has been sitting quietly just like a child who follows the orders of her father to the letter.

Chingiz sits down again and waits for the next question from the doctor.

The doctor does not know how to ask the next question so as not to cause a new outburst in Chingiz. He carefully says:

\- Let us begin to take a blood and a urine test before we move on. Are you okay with that?

He is sure to ask Chingiz for his approval first before he goes ahead and does anything. By so doing, he hopes that Chingiz would go along with the procedure.

\- Let's do it! Chingiz says authoritatively.

After the tests are done, they are sent home with an appointment for their next visit to come and get the result of their tests.

On the way back, they split. Chingiz goes to work and Ziba goes home with Anahita.

Half a day was lost on the account of the visit at the medical clinic. For Ziba, that is half a day that she could have used instead to get a lot of her sewing done.

Ziba heads home frustrated and angry with Chingiz who treats her like his property. She must bear with it for the time being. Right now, she has no choice. Nevertheless, it is a tall order for her to have to put up with him and his antics day in and day out. She knows that she cannot take much more of that hellish life and she must somehow find a way to free herself from it all.

Once she gets home, she sees that Ramin is standing at the building entrance. She is filled with joy as soon as she sees Ramin. He is her only friend. Sometimes, it seems that he is more than that. The way the two of them look at each other is a sure sign of a deeper level of affection.

Ramin, of course, has had a lot to do with how the relationship has flourished and the romantic feeling that has grown between them. The fact that he shows up at her place as often as he can. The fact that he personally drops off and picks up the material to and from Ziba's house even though, the company has staff to do that. And the fact that from the beginning, he showed an interest in her and got involved in her personal life.

Like two different poles of a magnet, they are drawn to each other. Ziba who has been deprived of feeling loved by Chingiz, and Ramin who is intrigued by the innocence he found in Ziba from day one. It is a match made in heaven.

\- Hi, am I ever so glad to see you here. Ziba expresses herself with a smile.

\- Same here. How is work? How is everything? I have brought a little maintenance kit for the sewing machine. I don't think you got that from us. It is a good idea to clean and maintain the machine now and again.

Sewing machine maintenance kit! To drive all the way from the suburb on the account of something so trivial, but for Ramin, that was good enough excuse to get to see Ziba. Ziba also knew that this was just an excuse to come and see her and that made her immensely happy.

\- Thanks, that was nice of you. Would you like to come in? Ziba asks though deep down inside she is worried that Chingiz might show up, or equally horrifying, someone might tip him off.

\- No thanks, I have to go. I'm already late. But we'll meet soon.

Ramin leaves at once. As much as he would have wanted nothing more but to stay a bit longer, he does not want to cause Ziba any grief.

So far their relationship has been nothing out of the ordinary, a simple friendship is all that it has been up to this point. Ziba has not been cheating on Chingiz, and Chingiz is not yet aware of Ramin's existence.

Anahita is growing up beautifully. She is a playful and happy little girl. To Ziba's surprise and delight, she demonstrates high level of intelligence that is well above her age. She is already good at talking, of course not like adults, but much better than her peers. She shows great interest in painting. Her favorite play seems to be drawing on papers with color-pencils and her drawings consist mostly of the things she sees around her, a representation that is quite impressive for a child of her age.

Ziba has already noticed how gifted Anahita is. She, like all other mothers, has high hopes for her little girl. To foster Anahita's enormous passion for drawing, Ziba ensures that there are plenty of papers and color pencils around.

Once Anahita drew a picture of her doll so artistically and beautifully that Ziba was absolutely amazed. So far, Ziba has saved everything Anahita has ever drawn. She knows that one day her little girl is going to make a name for herself in the world of art.

All Ziba does and all she endures are for the sake of her Anahita. She is the only gleam of hope and the only bright spot in her dark life. She knows wherever she may be and however she may live, Anahita is her daughter and no one can ever take her away from her.

In contrast, there is Chingiz who has never cared about his children or his wives. He is of a peculiar nature. One never knows what mood he is in. He is like a dormant volcano that can erupt at any point in time and without warning.
Chapter 11

April draws to a close. According to the weather forecasts on the radio, there is going to be a good summer ahead. But for Ziba, that does not have any meaning. Is Chingiz going to do anything special? Is he going to take his family on an outing or a trip? No, Ziba better forget about such things. She would be lucky if she gets just a little peace and quiet in her day-to-day life. She has big plans for her life and that of Anahita's and those are the ones she does not want to get spoiled.

She promises herself not to mention anything about summer holiday. She knows that to suggest any plans for summer holiday such as going out, traveling, and so forth would only aggravate Chingiz and would make him mad.

Putting any demand on Chingiz would lead to nothing more than a fight. That is why she also stopped talking about her desire to move to a larger place a long time ago. One day, one day she will have what she wants and deserves. One day when she is no longer dependent on Chingiz. Then, she can run her own life and make her own decisions. She lives for that day.

When Ziba thinks about her life with Chingiz, she becomes depressed. She gets mad at herself for ruining her life by marrying someone who is not only very old but impossible to live with.

However, when she thinks of Ramin, she finds herself overtaken by a sense of tranquility and serenity. She feels warm all over. A smile comes to her lips that is a sure sign of love. Ramin is the man of her dreams; the man whom she unfortunately met a little late in life. She is chained down by another marriage, a dreadful one for that matter. She went and committed her life to someone who is evil. She gave her promise of "till death do us part" to someone who has no appreciation and no regard for wedding vows. As for her though, she cannot break her promise. She does not want to do it, not for Chingiz's sake, no, but for the sake of a little innocent girl who has been brought into this world. The only safety she has is in the bosom of her mother. After all, there is no counting on the father figure in Anahita's life.

It is under these circumstances that it becomes difficult for someone like Ziba to walk away from a harsh life and start anew. The motherly love makes a woman sacrifice her life for her child without hesitation.

Each time Ziba thinks about putting an end to her horrendous marriage and leaving that unbearable life behind, it is the thoughts of Anahita that hold her back. She is well aware of her financial situation. She knows that as long as she does not have her own income, she is dependent on Chingiz. What is she going to do after she leaves Chingiz? To move back with her parents is absolutely out of the question. If they wanted her, they would have never given her away to an old man who fooled them with a bunch of empty promises. She cannot count on any of her relatives either. Who is left then? No one except for a total stranger, Ramin.

But who knows if Ramin is interested in marrying Ziba? If Chingiz would go for a divorce? No, of course not. He would sooner kill her than let someone else have her. What would happen to Anahita then? Surely Chingiz will get his revenge on her by taking Anahita. All these troubling thoughts make her uneasy and scared.

It is a sad state of affairs but no matter what, it is best for her to hold on, work hard, save as much money as possible, and avoid fighting with Chingiz until the day that she can put her plans into motion.

One Friday night when Ziba sits and reads the old newspapers, Chingiz comes home weary and tired. He is neither in a good mood or a bad one. Ziba had very much hoped that Chingiz would have at least brought a box of chocolate for her that day.

But what was about that day that had any significance to Ziba?

Chingiz takes off his shoes and puts more comfortable clothes on. He goes to the kitchen, opens the refrigerator, grabs the carton of milk and drinks milk straight from the carton. As soon as he gets a taste of the milk in his mouth, he notices that it has gone sour and spits it out.

\- Damn, what is wrong with this damn milk? Do you ever keep an eye on what's in this f...g fridge? What the hell do you do during the day anyway? Screams Chingiz and continues:

\- Move it now! Go get me milk. I know that the store is still open.

Ziba gets up and without a word, she grabs her coat to go and buy milk for her master. It is late. It is half past eleven at night. It takes fifteen minutes to get to the store from home. So for her, even if she walks fast, it would take half an hour to get there and come back.

When Ziba leaves, Anahita wakes up crying as a result of the pandemonium that her inept father created.

At first, Chingiz does not bother with her and keeps busy reading the newspaper. But after a few minutes, he loses his patience and shouts at Anahita:

\- Damn it, shut up! What is it with you now?

It does not help shouting at a child. She now starts to cry even more vociferously. Chingiz goes over to her crib and picks her up while he swears at Ziba's lousy housekeeping and child rearing.

The way he holds Anahita in his arms is the most idiotic way one can imagine. It is obvious that Chingiz does not have a clue as to how one should hold a baby. He has got his hands around Anahita's waist and is holding her away from himself like an object. Anahita feels uncomfortable so she cries even harder but her father does not get it.

At the same time, Ziba gets back and sees how awkward Chingiz is holding Anahita. She does not even take her coat off as she rushes in, gets the baby away from Chingiz, puts the milk on the table, and says:

\- Here you are, Your Lordship!

After all, since she had promised herself not to get into a fight with Chingiz anymore and to keep quiet at all costs, she says nothing more. She does not want to sabotage her own plans. She has goals to reach.

Ziba wonders what Chingiz was up to now? What in the world was going on? Milk! Chingiz drinking milk! Since when has he become addicted to milk that he must have it so badly that he sends her out that late at night to buy it for him? This must be one of his sick ways to just annoy her and show her who the boss is.

The way things went that night, Ziba felt silly to have even thought that she might be receiving any gifts from Chingiz. The fact that today was Ziba's birthday did not make any difference. Apparently, one cannot count on Chingiz for anything and cannot expect anything from him.

When everything calms down and Anahita falls asleep, thanks to her mother, Ziba asks Chingiz:

\- Do you know what day it is?

Chingiz is getting ready to go to bed. He does not bother with answering Ziba. He pretends not to even hear what she says.

Is he starting to become deaf as well? How insensitive, cold, selfish and inconsiderate can one be? So, Ziba asks a little louder:

\- Chingiz, do you know what day today was?

Chingiz is now halfway in bed. He answers while he stretches out in bed.

\- No! Why? Did we have to go to the doctor today? Or . . . ?

\- Forget it! Just forget it, Ziba says irately.

She does not even want to tell him now. He does not even deserve to know.

She is just as disappointed in him as she has been ever since they met.

Soon it is time for the next doctor's appointment. Now that is something that Chingiz does not forget. For when he is at work, that is the only thing he thinks of. He is afraid that there might be something wrong with him although he rather believes that it is Ziba who has done something to herself behind his back.

Chingiz is always of the belief that Ziba is up to something, that she is unfaithful, and that it is only a matter of time before he catches her.

Who knows why is Chingiz like this? Perhaps since he was never faithful in his past relationships himself, he thinks everyone is just like him as well.

The day for the doctor's appointment has come. They get ready and head over to the doctor's office.

At the doctor's office, the doctor has got the test results in his hand and says:

\- I am glad to see you again. The test results came back normal. But Mr. Chingiz you must be a little more cautious with your diet. You seem to have high cholesterol otherwise everything else is normal.

Chingiz is pleased to know that everything is fine with him and that he is as healthy as a horse.

Ziba is relieved that Chingiz's allegations were proven to be wrong and that he has the test results right there in front of him.

\- Now what we need to do is to send you both for fertility test, continues the doctor.

Chingiz asks perplexedly:

\- Fertility test? So what were those tests you took? What I want to know is who in the heck will take that test?

The doctor does not understand what the fuss is about since he had not said anything strange. He wonders what Chingiz's problem is now. He has no sooner opened his mouth to answer his questions, when Chingiz pipes up again and says furiously:

\- I want a female doctor to perform the test on my wife. All you want is to take advantage of every opportunity to seduce people's wives. As I said . . .

Chingiz gets interrupted by the doctor, who clearly does not appreciate getting insulted and says:

\- Mr. Chingiz, wait a minute. You are being offensive now. And you are getting ahead of yourself. To begin with, who said that I was going to perform the test? Your wife has to see a gynecologist, which is not what I am. Besides, do you think that everyone is out there after your wife? I am happily married and have four children. What do you take me for? If you want you are more than welcome to go to another clinic.

Chingiz shuts his mouth.

He has once again managed to make a spectacle of himself and embarrass his wife in public. If he wants to make a fool of himself, that is his business, but he has no right to humiliate his wife in front of others.

Chingiz turns to the doctor and asks:

\- Who is this gynaeco . . . whatever it was called?

\- It is called gynecologist. We have a female gynecologist at the clinic whom your wife can go see right now. I'll call and let her know you are on your way. So, if you don't mind, let's get this over with.

After they were finished at the clinic and on their way home, Ziba asks:

\- What do you say if we grab a bite to eat before we go home?

As silly as it was for Ziba to suggest something like that, she was merely hoping to bring some sort of normalcy to yet another disastrous and humiliating day. What is with Chingiz anyway? Why is he such a brute? He does not seem to have any conscience or remorse. If only Ziba could free herself from him; that would be a dream come true. The day that she can turn around to him and tell him that he no longer needs to feel obligated to provide for her and Anahita is what she lives for.

She was deep in her thoughts when Chingiz asked her to repeat herself.

\- Oh, I asked if we could eat out.

\- No, I have to go to work. You go home and make lunch! Do you think I am made of money? Chingiz replies back and with that, he heads to work.

Ziba could not expect more than that from him. She and Anahita head home. But suddenly it strikes her.

\- I have my own money. Well no, I can't touch that. But what about the measly allowance that Chingiz gives me? I can very well use some of that and buy lunch. How is he going to find out?

She and Anahita stop by a hot-dog vendor and get a couple of hot-dogs. It was not a dream lunch but at least, she ate out. And that is all she wanted!

On the way home she falls deep into her thoughts of leaving Chingiz one day and getting her life and freedom back. She has tried to level with Chingiz many times but she cannot get through. She is also too inexperienced to know how to deal with adversities. She is tired of the verbal, physical, and emotional abuse that she has to endure in living with Chingiz. She needs to find a way out and soon. But it is clear that for now, she must wait and keep quiet until she has saved up enough money to leave.

A few days later Ramin visits Ziba. It is time to pick up the completed orders and drop off the new ones. He is as always glad to meet Ziba at every opportunity he gets.

\- Hi Ziba, how are you? Asks Ramin, all cheerful to see her again.

\- Thanks, everything is fine. How are things with you? . . .

This time, Ramin gives himself permission to go into the house. Although he is afraid to cause trouble for Ziba, he cannot help himself. As soon as he enters the house, he is amazed at the size of the apartment. How can three people live in a tiny place like this? The small space of the apartment and the apparent sub-standard living conditions are unbelievable to Ramin. He finds it more like a prison than an apartment.

So, he asks Ziba:

\- How can you live in a hole like this?

\- Well, I do not know. We just do, responds Ziba uncomfortably.

She feels embarrassed thanks to her husband, Chingiz.

\- Is he, I mean your husband Chingiz, is he so thoughtless that he lets you be crammed into a small place like this? But then again, from everything you have told me about him, of course, this should not come as any surprise.

He feels for Ziba and her daughter. It is hard for him to hold back his feelings of contempt for Chingiz and not say anything. So, he continues:

\- No, damn it! How can this man treat you like this? He abuses you; he makes you live like this; he controls you. What else does he do? I am sure that he rapes you too.

Bull's-eye! He hits the nail on the head. She bursts into tears as soon as Ramin says that.

\- My dear friend! What can I say? This man has degraded me in every respect. I brought this misery on myself and I cannot back out of it. Who do I have? No one. What can I do? Nothing. I am lost and . . .

\- No, dear child, you are not alone. You have me. I will help you. I understand you now more than ever, says Ramin while he gives her a hug.

Ziba cries on Ramin's shoulders. While in each other's embrace, their eyes meet. They look each other in the eye for a few seconds. Like a flower that blossoms, Ziba smiles at Ramin. He tilts his head slightly forward and kisses her. She does not pull back.

She has found a friend in her lonely life. Until today, no one had offered her any assistance, any sympathy or affection. The only one who showed any concern about her situation was Ramin and today, he pledged his support to her and promised to help her out with her predicament.

They get into a long conversation that day and decide to meet the following day at eleven. In order for the neighbors not to see her get into his car, he suggests meeting her over at the next block.

Ziba is thrilled. She looks forward to seeing Ramin. Ziba only hopes that Chingiz's buddies do not blab to him about Ramin's long visit that day.

Shortly thereafter, Ramin leaves the stuff at Ziba's and takes the completed orders with him.

Chingiz comes home at night. He seems to be in a better mood. He has a smile on his face. And moreover, he brings with him a bag of grocery and a box of chocolate. He walks in and says:

\- Hello my lady. How have you been?

Ziba does not know what has brought this about, but she is just relieved that Chingiz is not in his usual bitter self. It is very rare to see him in a good mood.

\- Hi! Has something happened that I should know? Ziba answers while wondering how long it will take before he is going to fly off the handle.

Anahita goes to him shouting "Daddy, Daddy!"

\- Hi, little angel. Come here! Dad has got something for you princess.

Ziba still stands in the middle of the room and wonders what could have caused the one-hundred-and-eighty degree change in Chingiz. She wonders if this is for real or what.

\- Well, to what do we owe the pleasure of seeing Mr. Chingiz happy and in a good mood? Ziba repeats her question. She is dying of curiosity. She is baffled and surprised by what she sees.

\- Sure. I have won some money in the lottery, responds Chingiz.

\- Well, how wonderful! Is it true? How much?

\- Ten thousand.

Ziba is just glad to see Chingiz so happy. The winning money is of significance to her since she knows that not a penny of it will be spent on her or Anahita. Just to see Chingiz being calm and allowing his family to have some peace and quiet are worth more to Ziba than all the money in world.

That evening is the first of a few other good and fun evenings to come. Chingiz remains talkative and humorous. He plays with Anahita. He is nice to Ziba out of love and not because he wants to sleep with her. He even promises to get her whatever she wants, including a television set!

None of these gestures, however, influences Ziba to the extent that she would feel comfortable in sharing her secret about her work or the money she has saved with Chingiz. She knows that as soon as she comes out and tells Chingiz everything, he will become outraged and there will be hell to pay.

Chingiz has got his own secrets too. He has already got plans on how to spend the money, which does not involve Ziba or even Anahita for that matter. So, the money is soon to be blown away without making a difference in Ziba's or Anahita's lives.

Nonetheless, for now, Ziba's only thoughts are about her meeting with Ramin the next day. She is excited. She tosses and turns all night long, having butterflies every time she thinks about their rendezvous.
Chapter 12

The next day, content with life, Chingiz goes to work. Ziba immediately starts to get ready to go out with Anahita. She has a date today.

Exactly at eleven o'clock Ramin is at the said location. A few minutes later, he sees his sweetheart coming toward his car. Once she gets in, they drive away from that area as fast as they can.

In the car, Ziba sits in front while Anahita sits on the back seat. Ramin asks:

\- Are you okay? Has Chingiz gone to work?

\- Everything is fine, don't worry. How does it feel Ramin?

\- What?

\- Well, I just wonder. For me, this feels just as exciting as it is scary.

\- What do you mean? Why scary? I am thrilled to see you.

\- You know Ramin, I never thought I would go out with someone else besides the man I love and I marry . . .

\- Do you mean that you love Chingiz?!

\- No, for goodness sake! No, he is a monster. I mean the man of my dreams who was to become my husband. All I ever wanted was to find the right man and settle down with him. I guess, I'm a bit uncomfortable going out with someone while being married. But at least, I'm glad that it is you.

\- I am glad too Ziba. I'm glad to have met you. I have also been thinking about us and our situation since we met yesterday. I think you should get a divorce, take Anahita with you, and come live with me. I can . . .

\- Ramin, my dear Ramin, I wish I could. But it is not as easy as you think. I am trapped by Chingiz and don't believe that he is going to let me get away with something like that. Why don't we just concentrate on our time together right now and let go of all other thoughts for the time being?

Ramin says no more. He does not want to push her into doing something or rush her into anything.

They go sit in a restaurant and talk about anything and everything. They eat, laugh, comfort each other about their misfortunes and fall deeper for each other. Ziba trusts Ramin with all her secrets. She even tells him how Chingiz sexually abuses her.

Hearing all of that makes Ramin's blood boiling. He is head over heels for Ziba and cannot tolerate anyone abusing her or hurting her.

Ziba tries to make Ramin see the mess she is in. She tells him that she must somehow find a way to get herself out of that mess alive. She cannot, for Anahita's sake, just pack up and leave.

That day is the first day for Ziba to truly understand the feeling of being in love and being loved. She is making things harder on herself by getting herself deeper emotionally in an affair that can cost her, her life.

So far, Chingiz is clueless. He has not suspected anything yet. But then again, Ziba has not been unfaithful either since her relationship with Ramin is strictly an emotional one. Besides, she was never in love with Chingiz to begin with. The only feelings she has for Chingiz are rather hatred, anger, and contempt.

Days go by. Ziba and Ramin have not had the chance to meet again.

In the meanwhile, Chingiz reminds Ziba of their upcoming medical visit. Ziba is only glad that the date of their medical appointment does not coincide with the day that Ramin is supposed to drop by and pick up the sewing orders. Chingiz, on the other hand, is glad that he would get the results of the tests and find out, once and for all, if there is anything going on with Ziba.

At the doctor's office, Ziba sits calmly awaiting the doctor's report, which she knows would prove that there is nothing wrong with her.

When the doctor enters the room, he gets right to the point.

\- Unfortunately, we have to do a more thorough investigation. Something has come up that we must do further examination in order to be sure. If you . . .

\- Hold on! What kind of complications? Tell me what it is. Spit it out! Chingiz interrupts the doctor swiftly and demands an answer. He suspects that his misgivings about Ziba were correct all along. Therefore, he needs to find out the exact nature of the problem and he is anxious to get to the bottom of it right away.

The doctor sees no other way than to come out and say it. He knows that sooner or later he must inform them of the problem. But he does not want to worry a patient before he is absolutely sure about the results. In order to avoid further questions from Chingiz though, he says:

\- I can only say that your wife's test results were perfectly normal. But it is you we want to run some more tests on. If you come with me . . .

\- Get away from me! What the hell do you mean? That there is something wrong with me? Not in a million years. Damn idiot! You want to send me to an early grave and then seduce my wife! I know it. I saw it in your eyes the last time we were in your office.

There was quite a chaos at the clinic. Chingiz's hysterical outburst got everyone at the clinic to rush into the doctor's office to see what was going on. Nurses, doctors, and other staff tried to calm him down so that other patients would not be disturbed.

He eventually pulled himself together and sat down. He was breathing heavily and feeling dizzy.

Chingiz can never accept that there could be something wrong with him. He is terrified of medical examinations or surgery. He believes that falling into the hands of doctors is the same as surrendering to death.

In Chingiz's view, doctors are butchers who love to cut into people and sew them up again for no good reason.

Once he calmed down, he was asked to go to the lab. They needed to get a second sperm test from him.

This time it was not as easy for him as the last time. Due to being stressed, it took him a while before he was finished with the test.

On the way back from the clinic, Chingiz swore nonstop. Ziba did not dare do anything except to follow him, soundless and obedient like a dog whose master dragged her on a leash. Chingiz was beside himself. He was furious because he ended up being the one with a problem. He was just as scared as he was infuriated. He thought to himself what if there was something seriously wrong with him?

Ziba, on the other hand, was deep in her own thoughts worrying what kind of trouble she could expect from Chingiz after this ordeal. She had thought that she was going to be spared from fighting for a while. But she was sure that some sort of argument would ensue later on that evening once Chingiz got home from work. She had a really bad feeling about this one.

As they part, Chingiz does not even say goodbye to her. She rushes home to finish up her sewing orders. She is supposed to meet Ramin tomorrow. Maybe this was a bad idea since it is getting too scary, she thinks. She worries that if Chingiz finds out about any of this, he will surely kill her.

Chingiz goes to work irate. He feels outraged. Everything seems dark and negative.

Chingiz is not able to concentrate at work. He has a lot to think about. He stresses over the result of his second test, which is not going to be ready until the following week. He wonders why Ziba did not get pregnant again after Anahita. He thinks back at what Kobra had said and her allegations against Ziba. He thinks about the bank loan he took out which completely wrecked his finances. For a tiny second, he also thinks about Sam and how he never heard from anyone after the funeral. Thinking about Sam, prompts him, all of a sudden, to find out about Sam's inheritance and whatever became of that. Surely, Sam must have had some assets. What happened to them? Who inherited them?

There is no way for him to make any inquiries in that regard. He dares not try to find out about it from the relative of Sam's wife. He is well aware that he is not liked by them. He is also sure that it must have been them who inherited everything. As far as he is concerned, they are all a bunch of vultures and nothing more. Chingiz's views on Sam's in-laws are impacted by nothing more than his greed because he believes that he was cheated out of whatever inheritance that he might have got from Sam's estate.

It is hilarious that Chingiz never stayed in touch with any of his family members. Now he is angry because he was not present when the inheritance was divided.

While thinking about Sam, Chingiz is hit by another thought. More specifically, his other family members like his brother with whom he has had no contact for who knows how long. One, two, ten, . . . years? When was it that they last saw each other? Or when did he last visit his sister's or his mother's grave?

He keeps thinking about all of that over and over again. Maybe, this was an age-related phenomenon that, all of a sudden, he pauses to think about his family members; maybe, it was something else. Who knows?

Chingiz then starts to think of himself in comparison with Ziba. He thinks of how Ziba is in the prime of her life. The reality that Ziba has still a lifetime ahead of her makes Chingiz green with envy.

He knows that he does not have that many years left to spend with Ziba; something that is frightening to Chingiz. He is overtaken by the fear of dying. Afraid of what would happen to him and where he would end up, perhaps hell?

His thoughts are so overwhelming that he starts to quiver. He gets up and leaves the store without saying a word to his colleague.

He heads straight home. He gets home earlier than usual. When he arrives he sees how Ziba is busy with her work while Anahita sleeps in their bed. He looks at Ziba who is sitting on the floor wearing a pair of shorts and a tank top. Without warning, he approaches Ziba and gets her to lie down on the floor. The rest is what has become a common occurrence in Ziba's appalling and abysmal married life.

Ziba is no longer shocked by being treated so inhumanely by Chingiz, but the devastation is always as great as the first time it happened. She understands how victims of rape must feel.

However for the first time, Chingiz is not able to perform. He is terrified and frustrated at the same time. He was in a bad mood before, but now he is in the dumps. His ego is bruised in front of Ziba. He has never felt so humiliated in front of a woman in his entire life. Now he sees himself as an old, impotent man.

The blood starts to boil in his veins. He gets up while cursing at Ziba and his own life. He blames Ziba for everything. He accuses Ziba of having an affair and being unfaithful to him.

As soon as Ziba gets up to defend herself, Chingiz punches her in the mouth. Anahita wakes up by the noise and starts crying. Ziba implores Chingiz and says:

\- Chingiz please, I beg you, listen to me. I love you. I am not having an affair. There is no one else in my life. Why are you acting like this? Stop hitting me. I am your wife for goodness sake. Do I mean nothing to you? What has . . .

Ziba is tearful. She grabs Anahita out of bed to try to comfort her and calm her down. She keeps holding Anahita since she is not sure what Chingiz is going to do next and in case he gets mad at Anahita as well, she does not want him to hurt her baby.

Ziba tries to get Chingiz to come to his senses, but her pleads seem to have an opposite effect on Chingiz as he raises his hand and slaps her hard in the face.

Caught off guard, Ziba loses control and with Anahita in her arms, she falls and lands on the sewing machine that sits on the floor. Anahita's head hits the machine so hard that it makes a loud noise, which fills the room. Ziba is mortified. Ziba herself has also landed on the sewing machine and feels pain in her neck. But she is more worried about Anahita than herself.

She is petrified. What has happened to my baby? She screams.

Anahita is not moving. Her eyes are wide open but they are not moving. She lies on the floor with half her face covered in blood. Ziba roars:

\- Murderer, damn you. You killed my Anahita.

She takes Anahita into her arms. Anahita is lifeless. There are no signs of life in her. Her skull has been punctured as a result of landing on the sharp edge of the sewing machine with quite a force. She got her life shortened by her father.

Ziba cries incessantly and repeats her daughter's name over and over again. She curses at life for not having had any mercy on her. She damns both her father and her mother for leaving her in the hands of the devil. She is beyond words. The reason for her living is dead. She is numb in her state of shock and grief.

Chingiz, the horrible creature, is dead quiet now. He is shocked by Anahita's death. He is a murderer. He has killed his child.

Chingiz sits on the floor. He stares at Ziba with an empty look as she holds the lifeless body of Anahita in her arms and cries. He sees how Ziba's dress is stained red with Anahita's blood. How Anahita's bloody head lies lifelessly on her mother's shoulder. She does not move anymore. She no longer cries or laughs.

Chingiz looks at her and remembers how Anahita used to run to him each night when he came home. He remembers how Anahita used to shout Dad, Dad!

\- Oh, my God, what have I done! What have I done! Answer me you. Damn it, damn everything, damn this life . . .

Chingiz cries desperately. The death of Anahita has completely unraveled him. It has unleashed a lifetime of misery and pain that Chingiz had gone through, but never got a chance to manifest itself.

Ziba rises. She goes to the bathroom. Chingiz is still sitting on the floor with his head down, gazing at the floor. Ziba wants to wash Anahita's face. She is in a total state of shock.

Chingiz gets up and crawls in bed. He feels dead. There is nothing he can say or do to undo what has been done. He is responsible for the tragic death of Anahita, regardless of the fact that it was a freak accident. He knows that he must turn himself in. He knows that the remainder of his days will be spent between the four walls of a prison. He starts to cry again. But for what? For himself, or for having caused the death of his baby, Anahita? An innocent baby who had done nothing wrong. A baby whose existence was the only bright spot in her mother's dark life and her only source of hope for the future.

Chingiz is struck by both grief and fear. He trembles as he lies on his back in bed. His eyes are closed and his thoughts are far, far away. He thinks to himself that he is being punished for the sins he committed throughout his entire, miserable life.

Chingiz thinks about all the things that had preoccupied him earlier that day: death, hell, his son, his brother, his sister, his mother, and so on.

He is convinced now that hell and heaven do exist. That good and evil are something we create and cause ourselves. If we are good, we succeed in life. If we are evil, we are punished.

What has he done in all these years other than being mean, insensitive, cold, and egotistical? He has never made anyone happy. He has never helped anyone. He never even cared about his own children. Worse than that, he put his wives through hell and made them suffer. Why did he sleep with a prostitute and make her pregnant, bringing shame to his family, which ultimately led to his mother's death? Why did Kobra become so heartless? Why did he marry a young girl?

For all he had done to people around him, he now gets to experience what it feels like to live in misery and fear. He has now been given a taste of his own medicine. He, the evil, will now land in a place where he belongs.

Poor Ziba, a young girl who ended up losing everything she had. She washes Anahita's lifeless body and wraps her in a bath towel. She carries her in her arms and steps out of the bathroom. She sees Chingiz lying in bed with his eyes closed.

She wants him dead. She feels that her life has been completely shattered now that her Anahita is gone.

Ziba is in rage. She is physically battered, emotionally numb, and mentally in the state of temporary insanity. She is in such a state of mind that she does not feel any pain in her body. She must be in excruciating pain as a result of her neck hitting the sewing machine, but she feels no pain other than that of Anahita's death.

When she sees Chingiz lying on the bed and when she sees her beloved daughter dead in her arms, she decides to have the father join his daughter. No matter what, it was Chingiz who killed Anahita and he must pay for his crime.

She thinks that since Chingiz did not allow Anahita to live, his life should be ended as well.

Ziba is mad. There is only one thought in her mind and that is revenge. The uncontrollable rage in every cell of her body calls for revenge.

She is vengeful. The desire for vengeance intensifies so quickly and so much that she does not want anything other than Chingiz's blood.

Ziba's hopelessness has reached its peak. She understands the harsh reality that she cannot bring Anahita back to life. That Anahita is gone for good. Her body is turning cold and soon it will stiffen in her arms.

She goes to the kitchen and gets a kitchen knife.

In one hand, she carries Anahita's corpse and in the other, she holds a kitchen knife. She walks toward the bed where Chingiz lies dormant. She raises her hand, aims for the heart of the beast and sticks the knife as hard as she can into Chingiz's chest.

Screams that gradually turn into weaker sounds fill the entire room and break the eerie silence.

Chingiz's eyes that had popped open from pain stare at Ziba who is standing by the bed with Anahita in her arms, wrapped in a towel.

He finds himself lying on his back in bed with a knife stabbed in his chest.

His heart is about to beat its last beats.

The time has come for him to say goodbye to the world. These are the last breaths he will ever take.

Ziba looks at him and with a mild smile on her face, she tells him:

\- Give my love to my Anahita when you see her. Do not be nasty to her! Tell her not to be afraid for her mother will be with her soon.

Chingiz's blood gushes out of his chest. He cannot talk anymore. His mouth is full of blood. He draws his last breath.

Ziba lays Anahita down next to Chingiz and puts a blanket on them.

\- Sleep you two! I am here. I will take care of you.

She says that and goes back to her sewing. She cleans the floor, puts everything in order again, turns on the radio, and finishes up sewing the garments that Ramin is to collect tomorrow.

Devoid of any emotions, Ziba works until midnight. It is as if she has found peace within. She completes sewing the last garment.

Once done with sewing the last piece, Ziba packs up the sewing machine, puts the excess sewing material in a plastic bag, folds the finished garments neatly and puts them in a cardboard box, and puts them all next to each other in a row by the door. She sweeps the floor, gets a pen and paper, and sits at the table.

She begins to write. It is her first and last letter to Ramin.

"To my beloved Ramin. The one who filled my heart with so much joy and love. The one who showed me what it is to love and to be loved,

I am writing these lines to you who gave me a glimpse of hope in my dark and empty life. To you who came along and lit up my life. And to you my love who made me feel alive again.

Sadly, the cruel and merciless life has hit me so hard this one last time that I find it impossible to carry on. Now that God has stretched out his hands and has called me to his kingdom, I must obey him and be on my way.

My Anahita has already departed and she must be anxious to see her mother again. I have to attend to her. She is too young and she needs me.

Since I did not want you, my love, to be disappointed in me for having left my work unfinished, I have sewed all the garments and have fulfilled my contract for the last time.

I will always think of you and will never forget those brief moments we met.

I wish you all the best in life and success in your career.

I will always cherish the memories I have of you and our first, last and only kiss.

Your friend, Ziba"

When she finishes writing to Ramin, she kisses the letter and leaves it on the table with a pen lying on top of it. She then grabs her diary, which she had kept hidden from Chingiz all throughout, and makes one last entry. She closes her diary for the last time and leaves it next to her letter to Ramin on the table. She looks around to make sure that the house is tidy and that everything is in its place. She goes to the bathroom, reaches for the cabinet above the sink, opens the cabinet door and takes two unopened bottles of sedatives and a bottle of painkiller from inside the cabinet.

She pops the pills in her mouth, one handful at a time, and drinks a large glass of water in order to push the pills down her throat. When she has poured all of that down her throat, she throws the empty bottles of the pills in the trashcan.

She unlocks the door and leaves it slightly ajar.

She turns off the radio and the lights and she goes to bed. She pushes Chingiz a bit toward the wall so as to make room for herself beside him and Anahita. She lies down on the left side of Chingiz with Anahita in the middle and pulls a second blanket over herself and them.

It does not take long before she falls into a deep sleep.

Poor souls who lie dead next to one another.

At last, Kobra's dream has come true. She wanted this marriage over and now she has got her wish.

The next day at eleven o'clock, there comes a knock at the door. It is Ramin who has shown up right on schedule for his previously planned meeting with Ziba.

He notices that the door is open. But he does not hear any noise coming from the inside of the apartment. He finds that strange.

Having no idea about what awaits him at the other side of the door, he opens the door halfway and shouts:

\- Hello! Is anybody home? Ziba?

No response. He does not feel comfortable going into the apartment, but what else is he supposed to do?

He swings the door wide open. The apartment looks clean and tidy, nothing out of ordinary at least insofar as he can see from where he is and based on the angle he is looking at the room.

A few seconds later, he decides to go in. Despite feeling awkward, he steps inside the apartment. As soon as he comes in, he notices the bed and the fact that there is someone in it.

He thinks how odd that the door is left open. He wonders why Ziba is sleeping till this late in the morning. And he does not understand how she could not hear him shouting after her.

He is dumbfounded. What is going on? He wonders if he should go up to her in bed or not?

Ultimately, he moves closer to the bed and right away he sees the white and lifeless faces of Chingiz, Ziba and Anahita.

In sheer panic and disbelief, Ramin rushes out of the apartment and pounds on a neighbor's door. The horrified neighbor opens up the door and asks:

\- What is it . . . ?

\- Come, come and see!

Ramin drags the man in his house-robe to the apartment and shows him the bodies. Pulling away from the horrifying scene, the man says:

\- Oh my God, we have to call the police.

Ramin stands still for a while staring at the bed. It is now that he slowly begins to grasp what has happened. He turns his head and looks around the place. He notices the pen and the paper that lie next to a little book on the table. He walks over and sees the letter. He takes it up and reads it.

The enormity of sadness is unbearable. He cries out of pure and utter desperation. He feels great remorse for not having been able to prevent what had transpired. He thinks that he betrayed Ziba. He blames himself for not having helped her earlier when he became aware of the gravity of her situation.

The neighbor comes back with his wife. The wife had insisted on following along and seeing with her own eyes what had happened.

\- Dear God, from dust to dust and from ashes to ashes, says the neighbor's wife.

\- I called the police. They are on their way, the neighbour informs Ramin and asks:

\- Who are you?

\- My name is Ramin. She, Ziba, worked at my factory as a seamster, says Ramin with trembling voice and teary eyes.

The police and the paramedics show up. After conducting a preliminary investigation, they collect all the facts they need. But the police wants to talk more with Ramin because of Ziba's letter.

Ramin tells the police that, in all honesty, they felt drawn to each other, but that was all there was to it and nothing more.

The police did not have a hard time putting the pieces together, in part, thanks to Ziba's diary.

It also came as no surprise that despite all the noise from the apartment, no phone calls were made by the neighbours the night before. The neighbours were, after all, accustomed to hearing a lot of yelling and screaming from that apartment.

In the aftermath of the tragedy, Kobra and Ziba's parents were informed about the incident.

For Kobra, this must have come as great news. She wanted nothing more than to end Chingiz's marriage and now it had ended.

As for Ziba's parents, what could they do but to mourn the loss of their child and grandchild. The day they agreed to give their daughter away to an old man, who for all intents and purposes could have been Ziba's father or grandfather, they had already sealed her fate.

For Ramin, the pain was unbearable and the experience was cruel and heart wrenching. He loved Ziba and wanted all the best for her in life. He could have never thought that Ziba's life would have such a tragic and abrupt ending.

I dedicate this book to all the women around the world who are under oppression; who are deprived of living in freedom and peace; and, who are victims of abuse.

About the author:

I am a member of the Swedish Writers' Association.

I am also a member of Sweden's General Art Association.

Would you like to know more about me?

Visit my website: http://www.arya.se

Wikipedia: <https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Akram_Monfared_Arya>

Read my Autobiography on Smashwords: <http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/428619>

Connect with me:

Follow me on Twitter: <https://twitter.com/#!/FlyingPoet>

Friend me on Facebook: <http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=1834267705>

Or:  http://www.facebook.com/?ref=logo#!/profile.php?id=724582985

Contact me: arya@arya.se

