

Also by Amanda Hamm

_The 4_ th _Floor Lounge_

Meet Cute: 5 Romantic Short Stories

Stories From Hartford Series

_Hearts on the Window_ (#0.5, an ebook exclusive _)_

_Andrew's Key_ (#1 _)_

_Jealousy & Yams_ (#2 _)_

_Collecting Zebras_ (#3 _)_

_The Christmas Project_ (#4 _)_

Coffee and Donuts Series

_Said and Unsaid_ (#1 _)_

_Sofie Waits_ (#2 _)_

_A Perfectly Good Man_ (#3 _)_

_Not Complicated_ (#4 _)_

They See a Family

### The Study Group

A short story by

### Amanda Hamm

Copyright 2018 Amanda Hamm

All rights reserved. Before Someday Publishing

Smashwords Edition

The Study Group is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places, events, etc. are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. This short story first appeared as a seven part series on amandahammbooks.com.

****

"What are you working on today?" Annie asked. She leaned closer, not so much to see but to smell. Carlos smelled awesome. She wanted to ask him what it was so she could get a bottle to use as air freshener for her dorm. She had to wait though. Why do you always smell so awesome seemed more like a second date question and they hadn't even been out once yet, much to Annie's disappointment.

"Statistics," he said.

"Oh." Her nose wrinkled, despite the pleasant scent.

"Not a fan of statistics?"

"Let's just say I'm glad I only needed one semester."

"I could help you with statistics." Jake leaned across the table with an earnest expression.

Annie sat back. "I took that last semester," she reminded him.

He nodded. "I remember." His eyes stayed wide as though he was still offering.

"So I don't need help anymore."

"I think this semester seems to be going better for everyone," Hannah observed as she looked around the group. There were six of them at the table, all sophomores. They went to the same church and formed a study group at the beginning of the school year. Since they were mostly taking different classes, they usually just sat together while they worked on different homework. Sometimes they did help each other study, and sometimes they talked so much that nobody got any work done. Hannah's eyes lingered on Aaron longer than anyone else. They'd recently started dating.

"Yeah," Annie said, "I know Mallory's as glad to be through that tough English class as I am to be done with statistics. That class was a huge disappointment."

Mallory was on Annie's other side. "You actually thought it might be interesting?" she asked.

"Sort of. I mean, when I think statistics, I think of a bunch of cool facts. Like this percentage of people use their right hand even though they're left-handed and one out of every so many cows has twins. But the class was like memorize this formula. Now memorize this formula. You need to know all six of these formulas for the test."

Everyone at the table laughed at her impression of the class until Carlos shushed them. "Quiet, guys," he said. "I'm trying to memorize a formula here."

Then they laughed harder.

Annie leaned over his paper again. "That does look vaguely familiar."

"You're interested in left-handed people?" Jake twirled his pencil while he talked, in his left hand. Annie hadn't noticed he was left-handed before. She knew Carlos and Hannah both were. The fact that half the people at the table were left-handed was probably statistically significant in some way and far more interesting than the whole semester of formulas had been.

Mallory poked her in the back. "Your idea of what constitutes a cool fact is a bit of a stretch."

Annie rolled her eyes at herself. "Well, I didn't have time to look anything up."

"Is there such a thing as a cool fact?" Hannah hitched her eyebrows together skeptically.

"Sure," Jake said. "There are whole books of weird but true things."

"Weird, not cool," Hannah said.

"Weird can be cool." Carlos tipped his head as though giving the matter serious thought, probably more serious than it deserved.

Annie found this serious nature attractive. It wasn't as though he went around brooding or anything. He just seemed more mature than a lot of the young men at school who thought bodily functions were necessary for comedy. "I agree," she said. "At least sometimes. But I was talking about statistical facts, not which animals can turn their tongues upside-down."

"But what about the percentage of animals who can turn their tongues upside-down?"

Carlos smiled and said, "Good one, Jake. I bet that's a small number."

Carlos had a nice smile and a nice serious face and Annie could not inhale often enough whatever that great scent was. Why were they talking about tongues?

"Ow!" Annie turned around as she felt another jab in her ribs.

Mallory handed her a notebook. "Here. Quiz me on those names again."

"Okay." She took the notes and began to go down the list. It was difficult not to laugh whenever Mallory struggled for an answer. She'd open and close her mouth while she twirled red curls around her fingers. It almost looked as though she was treating herself like her own ventriloquist's dummy. They were working through the notes a second time when Hannah snapped a textbook closed.

"Wow," she said, "I can't believe how late it's gotten." She stuffed her book into a bag.

"You're always the first one to turn into a pumpkin," Mallory teased.

"Sorry, guys. I've never been a night owl." Hannah had stood and was putting on her coat.

Aaron was gathering his things as well. "I'll walk you back."

Hannah paused long enough to turn gooey as she thanked him. The others waved as the two of them walked away from the table holding hands.

"How about those of us who are night owls head over to the Sundial for a late night snack?" Jake suggested. "I'm thinking French fries."

"Sorry, man." Carlos was the first to answer. "I gotta stay put. This is due tomorrow."

"Anyone else?" Jake's eyes landed hopefully on Annie with little flickers over to Mallory.

"Count me out," Mallory said. She was collecting her books and papers. "Even though I gave Hannah a hard time, I should get to bed, too."

Annie hurriedly stuffed everything she brought into her bag to keep up with Mallory. "It is probably time to call it a night." She grabbed her coat and put it on as she and Mallory left the library together.

****

The campus was mostly quiet as Annie and Mallory walked back to their dorm. Indistinguishable voices came from somewhere in the distance, traveling far on the night air. The sidewalk was well lit, but the cold hurried them along with little appreciation for light with no heat.

"Man, that study group is getting awkward," Mallory said.

"You mean Hannah and Aaron making moony eyes at each other?"

"Sometimes they're a little too cute. But I'm talking about your little triangle."

"My what!?"

Mallory laughed. "Oh, my goodness, this is you." She put on a high squeaky voice. "What are you working on, Carlos? Can I sit on your lap for a better look?"

"I do not sound like that." Annie tried to act innocent, but she was cringing on the inside. She had to admit she'd been getting pretty obvious with her attention to Carlos. She wanted him to notice but not anyone else.

"Meanwhile, Jake's all... Look at me, Annie! Look at me! Why don't you just go out with Jake?" Mallory asked.

"Why? So _you_ can date Carlos?" A bit of jealousy flared up. Not about Carlos specifically but simply because Mallory was very pretty, with long legs and a charming southern accent. Annie wouldn't want to compete with her for any guy. Sometimes she had to remind herself that standing next to Mallory wasn't a competition.

"Relax," Mallory said. "I'm not interested in Carlos. Why do you like him so much?"

"Are you kidding? He's like tall, dark and handsome personified. If, um, that didn't already..." Mallory was beginning to chuckle at the fumbling description. "Come on," Annie said, "you know what I mean. It's too cold to be eloquent."

Both girls quickened their steps to acknowledge that the weather was pretty typical for February in Ohio.

"Fine," Mallory said. "You like the way Carlos looks. But what do you like about _him_."

"Don't make me sound shallow. There's nothing wrong with noticing that a guy is good-looking. You make it sound like that's the only reason I like him."

"You haven't said any other reasons," Mallory pointed out, a little too smugly for such a good friend.

Annie tried to think of how to erase the smugness. "I like his sense of humor."

"Cliché." Mallory dismissed the reason. "And Jake is funnier."

"Carlos takes school seriously. I admire that."

"No, he doesn't." Mallory didn't sound smug anymore. Now she was looking at Annie as though she was delusional, which was not better.

"What do you mean?" Annie asked. "He keeps a record of all his scores for all his classes to monitor his grades."

"That's because he needs to keep a C average to keep his scholarship, and he doesn't want to accidentally do more work than necessary."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He's said it more than once. I think you must have been too busy smelling him to use your ears."

Annie's face burned despite the cold wind. The others could tell when she was enjoying the scent?

"Don't worry," Mallory said. "I think it's only obvious to me because you told me. But... I have to say that _Jake_ seems to put forth good effort out of respect for his teachers and the money his parents are spending."

"Why do you keep bringing up Jake? Do you have a thing for him?" She knew it was a stupid question before Mallory laughed. She wouldn't be trying so hard to convince Annie of his merits if she wanted him for herself.

"I just... I can see you two together. And clearly Jake can, too."

"Well, that's not going to happen." Annie didn't want to talk about Jake. She'd rather talk about Carlos.

"Are you sure? Because he's not giving up."

"What makes you say that?"

Mallory laughed with disbelief as she pulled open the outer door to their dorm and held it for Annie.

Annie walked through. "Thanks. Now why are you laughing at me?"

"Either you're blind or you're even more distracted by Carlos than I thought. You didn't notice Jake offering to help you with non-existent homework? And did you really think he wanted all three of us to join him for a snack?"

"Hmm..." Annie frowned as she began to climb the stairs. Their room was on the third floor.

"Why won't you go out with Jake anyway?"

"I don't know. I guess... there's just no spark there. Wouldn't I be leading him on if I went on a date with someone I'm not interested in like that? He's more of a friend."

"One date isn't leading him on," Mallory said earnestly. "It's giving him a chance."

"I wish Carlos would give me a chance."

"Then you know what you have to do."

"I do?" Annie sent her friend a questioning look as she began to unbutton her coat. Climbing stairs was an efficient way to warm up.

"I really don't know if you have a shot with Carlos, but I don't think you can find out until you go out with Jake."

"That doesn't make any sense. Why would going out with one guy give me a chance with another guy?"

"Well..." Mallory's steps slowed as her mind picked up the pace. "It's not like I've sat down and had a conference with the guys so maybe I'm way off... but I think Carlos feels like, sort of like Jake saw you first. Or a less childish way of saying it. I think he's not going to make a move _if_ he wants to, until Jake backs off. So you need to prove to Jake that there's no spark to get him to do that."

"I'm not going out with him," Annie said. "I'll just have to tell him to back off."

****

Annie and Mallory were the last to show up for the next study group meeting. It was Thursday. Annie had a paper due on Friday. She needed ten pages and had written four. Her mind was solely on homework as they approached.

Then Mallory rushed the last few steps to grab a seat and leave the only empty seat right between Jake and Carlos. Annie pulled out the chair and tried to sit herself in the exact center of the table. Mallory said she'd been too conspicuous in her attention to Carlos so she was careful not to lean that direction. And she didn't want to give Jake any false encouragement so she avoided his side, too.

Annie's grandmother was a stickler for proper posture and would have loved the straight spine she maintained while she pulled her laptop from her bag.

"Getting right to work today?" Jake asked.

Annie nodded while she tried to figure out where she'd saved her outline. She'd only made an outline because she had to turn it in separately, but now that she was facing a short deadline she was willing to see if it would help.

"Someone's been slacking this week." Mallory's tone was gentle teasing. "She's been watching too much TV with me."

"You shouldn't have been tempting me," Annie said.

Jake addressed Mallory. "Doesn't that mean you've been watching too much TV, too?"

"Yes," Mallory admitted, "but I'm not the one who's paying for it with six pages in one night."

"Six pages?" Hannah looked sympathetic.

"Two words," Carlos said. "Big font."

"Let us know if you want any help." Jake pushed his books a little to the side to show willingness to delay his own work. "But I'm sure you can do it."

Annie smiled at the support around her. "Thanks, everyone. I think I just need to concentrate."

Whether the others were trying not to disturb her or just busy themselves, Annie didn't know. The mood stayed sober and quieter than usual either way. She was able to listen to some occasional chitchat without letting it interrupt.

Carlos was the first to leave. Annie acknowledged his departure with a wave and little disappointment. She'd become too engrossed in her homework to care who was sitting on either side of her.

She'd written a few more paragraphs when Hannah said, "It's getting late. How's the paper coming, Annie?"

"I'm halfway through page nine. I think I can make it." Annie looked up as she answered and saw that Mallory had her coat on as well.

"How about you pack up and finish at the dorm?" Mallory asked.

"Um..." Annie was trying to hang on to the thought she wanted to work into the paper next. "I'm making good progress. I think I'll be faster if I stay put."

"Do you mind if I tag along with these guys, or do you want me to stay until you're done?" Mallory's eyes went from Hannah and Aaron – who were standing with bags over their shoulders already – to Jake – who gave her a quick nod – before they landed on Annie for an answer.

Annie paused to register the situation. She was aware that the others were arranging to have Jake walk her to her dorm. They might have been taking advantage of the fact that he was a nice guy. They might also have been conspiring to leave the two of them alone. The only thing that mattered to Annie at the moment was getting her work done. "Go ahead," she said to Mallory. "I don't think I'll be too much longer."

There were a few encouraging looks mixed in with the waves and Annie said goodnight while trying to think about how she could stretch a simple idea into at least two sentences. Then she went back to typing. Her keys seemed to click louder with only two people at the table.

Eventually, Annie's concluding paragraph spilled a line and a half onto page eleven. It seemed very awkward. She stared at it for a few moments. The document was forcing a line onto that page to keep four words from being stranded. Maybe she could find a few words to delete to end at exactly ten pages.

Then she noticed that her battery was almost dead and the library was fifteen minutes from closing. The paper stopped feeling awkward and just felt done. She closed the laptop.

"All done?" Jake asked.

"Yes, I'm done." Annie answered quickly, hoping he hadn't noticed he'd startled her.

"Good. You were looking relieved about something. I was afraid I'd missed some other problem."

"Looking relieved made you think there was a problem?"

"No. That there _was_ a problem. And I missed my chance to help." He smiled and widened his eyes expectantly, trying to get a laugh at what was supposed to be a joke.

Somehow, the fact that it wasn't funny made her laugh. It might have had something to do with the way Jake was looking at her as though she could go ahead and laugh at him for making a terrible joke.

"Ready to go?" he asked. "Or do you have other work?"

Annie didn't have any more work. She probably couldn't have gotten anything done before the library closed anyway. His manner stopped her from answering immediately though. There was no impatience. The only thing sitting in front of him was a closed book. His dorm was in the opposite direction as hers. Yet he asked if she had anything else to get done as though he wasn't bored and going out of his way to help her. He was exactly the kind of guy she should be looking for.

But when she looked _at_ him... nothing. He had light brown hair that wasn't curly so much as just fluffy. His ears stuck out, and he was attempting a goatee that wasn't improving anything. He reminded her more of Mr. Tumnus the Fawn than any dashing hero.

"Annie?" Jake's forehead crinkled to reinforce the question in the air.

"Oh." She began to put her things into her bag. "Yeah, um, let me just get everything together." She buttoned up her coat and wrapped a scarf around her neck. There were gloves in her pockets, which she took out and wiggled her fingers into as they walked out of the library. Despite her preparations, the cold night air stung her face and made her eyes squint against it.

"I think I'm about ready for spring," Jake said.

"Me, too." She adjusted the strap on her bag as she hugged herself for warmth.

"Is that bag heavy?" Jake held out a hand. "Can I carry it for you?"

"You want to carry my bag? What year is this?"

Jake pulled his hand back as though she'd slapped it. "I guess it's the year I stop offering to carry your bag."

Annie chuckled only partly because it was a funny response. Mostly she was relieved that he kept the mood light when he could have gotten annoyed. She regretted snapping at the offer. Helping someone was never outdated. It was only because that specific idea hinted at an old fashioned courtship that she got defensive. She didn't want to give Jake the impression that anything had changed. He'd asked her out just before Christmas break, suggested they get together while school was closed. She told him they could see each other as friends. Though he'd said that was okay with him, he hadn't sounded at all convincing. Annie had avoided making any specific plans. But that didn't mean they couldn't be nice to each other. "Sorry," she said. "I meant to say no, thank you."

Jake smiled with some sadness. It seemed he understood her reaction. He apparently figured he had nothing to lose because he said, "I don't suppose you'd be willing to spend some time with me this weekend. Just something casual. Maybe Saturday?"

"I'm actually going home this weekend." Annie was grateful to have a true excuse, even if it was an excuse. "It's my mom's birthday."

"Fremont's not that far," Jake said. "I can drive over there to get you if you have a break in the family time."

"If you showed up at my parents' house, you'd have to come in and meet everyone and let them interrogate you and stuff."

"Okay."

Annie stopped laughing. The simple and very quick response caught her off guard. She'd been ready to joke about how awful that would be for him. But he was willing to face her parents as if he was a date when he wasn't a date?

"I could treat you to lunch or dinner on Saturday." Jake pressed ahead while she was mentally stumbling. "Would one of those work?"

She thought lunch sounded less romantic and that's what she'd say if Mallory was there telling her to give him a chance. Then she heard herself say, "Lunch," when Mallory wasn't there.

Jake was there. He looked surprised but extremely happy. "Great," he said. "Great." Then he started telling her a story about something that happened in one of his classes.

Annie enjoyed the story. She let it distract her from the cold walk. But in the back of her mind, lunch on Saturday was distracting her as well. She wasn't entirely sure how or why she'd agreed to something that was not a good idea.

****

Annie looked out the window for Jake. He wasn't late. He said he'd be there around 11 am and that was still a half hour away. She'd decided to wait until the last minute to tell her parents that someone was coming over. But she didn't want to wait until he was pulling in the driveway either.

It wasn't that she was worried her parents would embarrass her, or Jake. They were fairly reasonable people. Coming to meet the parents gave a date vibe to the situation that she didn't want because it wasn't a date. She wished she'd been clearer with Jake about that. Now she was hoping that if she waited long enough to say something, the rest of her family would conveniently need to run an errand right before he showed up.

Annie came away from the window and soon found her mom flipping through the pages of a magazine. Her ten-year-old brother was slumped against her arm, sound asleep. Annie took a seat across the room from them and picked up a puzzle book from the coffee table. Restlessness kept it closed in her lap. She fiddled with the cover as she watched the minutes slink past. If she waited much longer, Jake could be early and show up before she warned anyone.

"Mom?"

Diana looked up at her daughter.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm going out for lunch. A friend from school is coming to pick me up soon."

"Oh!" Diana smiled with interest. "What's his name?"

Annie wanted to scowl at her mom for assuming the friend was a guy. But she was trying to act as though that didn't matter. "Jake," she said.

"How long have you know him?"

"He's part of the study group we started from church this year."

"And what is he studying?"

"Mom, you don't have to grill me. He's just a friend. We're just having lunch. Please don't treat him like a date when he gets here."

"When who gets here?" Annie's dad, Cliff, had walked into the room while she was talking.

Diana smiled up at her husband. "A boy from school is coming to take Annie out to lunch."

"Really?" Cliff pulled himself up straight as he folded his arms across his chest. "Do I know this boy?"

"You can meet him when he gets here," Annie said, "as long as you don't act like that."

He breathed in to puff up his chest. "Like what? I need to be sure this boy knows how to treat my baby."

"I'm not a baby. He's a nice guy. And it's _not_ a date."

Diana reached up and patted her husband's arm. "It does sound as though she's known him for a while."

Annie's dad continued his intimidating posture. She thought he might only be doing it to tease her, but she wasn't positive. Before she could decide which approach to use to get him to cooperate, another person entered the room, her 13-year-old brother William.

"Hey," he said. "A car just pulled into the driveway."

"Annie is expecting a friend to take her to lunch," Diana explained.

"Can I come!?"

His mom chuckled. "I don't think Annie wants you tagging along on her date."

"It's not a date," Annie hissed. And it certainly wouldn't be if she brought her little brother. "Sure, William, you can come."

"Cool," he said. "I got to find my shoes."

The doorbell rang as he ran up the stairs.

"I'll get it," Annie said, before anyone else could make a move. Her eyes pleaded with her dad to relax as she walked away. He frowned a bit deeper.

The first thing she noticed when she opened the door was that Jake was holding a bunch of small colorful flowers.

"Hi," he said. He seemed to follow her eyes and lowered the bouquet to make his other had more prominent. It was holding a package of M&Ms. "These are for you." He handed her the M&Ms, which she knew he got because he'd seen her snacking on them at the study group.

"Thanks," she said.

"You didn't sound excited about flowers, but I brought some because you said it was your mom's birthday." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "Does _she_ like flowers?"

Annie nodded. It wasn't going to do him any good to ingratiate himself with her parents. But her mom did like flowers. "Come on in." She motioned Jake to follow her to the living room. She made very quick introductions before she said, "And he brought birthday flowers for mom."

"Oh, how nice." Diana got up to take the flowers. Michael woke up as she pulled herself out from under him.

Cliff had refolded his arms after he shook Jake's hand. He was silently staring at him.

"Dad," Annie said, "can you please tone it down? I'm sure Jake would answer a few questions if you like and that would be more productive than you trying to look scary."

Cliff slowly cracked a smile as he lowered his arms. "I suppose I don't need to be intimidating since you're bringing a chaperone."

Jake looked at Annie for clarification.

"My brother wanted to come with us," she said, "and I told him that was okay. I hope you don't mind."

"No. No, that's fine." Jake looked at Michael. "You're coming to lunch with us?"

Michael grinned as he said, "I'm hungry."

He was still rising from the couch as William bounded into the room and flung open a hall closet to grab his coat.

Jake glanced between them and seemed to realize his mistake.

Annie smiled as his expression seemed to waver between overwhelmed and entertained. "I guess we're all going," she said. "Don't worry, I'll pay for the boys."

"No, I can—"

Jake was cut off by Annie's mom. "Michael and William can stay home."

"But Annie said I could go," William protested.

"I think taking both boys is a great idea," Cliff said.

Diana shot him a disapproving look.

"So do I." Jake nodded as he caught up with the situation. "I'd like to know Annie better, and I'm sure her brothers have lots of good stories."

"Oh, I can tell you about the time Annie dropped the lasagna on the door of the oven," William said. "Face down."

Annie had already grabbed her coat and Michael's. She was helping Michael into his. An afternoon of listening to William list her mistakes didn't exactly sound fun. But it probably wasn't what Jake had in mind either. Surely this would give him the hint to back off.

Diana handed Annie a small envelope. "You'll need his noon pills if you're sure you want to take him."

Jake and William were halfway out the front door, chatting like old friends. Annie put on her own coat and pushed Michael's meds securely to the bottom of her pocket. Her mom was looking at her with great sympathy. Her dad was nodding approvingly at the turn of events. Annie couldn't decide which of them was being more annoying. She put on a big smile and waved at both of them.

****

"Do you want a cheeseburger, Michael?" Annie asked. "Or something else. They have chicken."

A blank stare was her only response.

"Michael?" She spoke louder.

His eyes seemed to focus on her.

"Do you want a cheeseburger?"

"I like McDonalds," he said.

"You're in luck. That's where we are." As soon as they got into his car, Jake had assured Annie that he still intended to pay for the expanded party. When William asked to go to the inexpensive fast food place, Annie readily agreed. Few people would call it romantic. She ordered for herself and Michael and the four of them soon sat down with a tray of food.

Jake turned to William, who was sitting next to him. "So," he said, "you were going to tell me about Annie dropping the lasagna."

William began to chew faster so he could talk.

"It's not a story," Annie said first. "I dropped it. There was a huge mess. The end."

"But it was funny," William said, still chewing.

"Because you didn't have to clean it up."

"Neither did you. Mom did."

"She made me help." Jake was watching the two of them with amusement and Annie realized that her kid brother was bringing out her juvenile side. "Okay," she said. "Tell the story."

"Annie wanted to make this fancy lasagna. It had, I don't know, this green stuff and a weird runny cheese and..." William was waving a chicken nugget around and he set it back in the box as he planned to talk awhile before getting another bite. "And she spent forever chopping things up and making layers and then... there was this commotion. I came into the kitchen when Annie screamed. Mom and Dad were arguing over something and Michael was just standing in the corner yelling, 'Hot, hot!' Then I figured out that Mom and Dad were trying to decide if any of the lasagna was still edible. The pan was upside down on the oven door and white and red stuff was oozing out all around it. Annie was at the sink crying."

"Did you burn yourself?" Jake interrupted with a concerned expression.

"A little," Annie said. "That's what made me drop it. But the tears were just... It was nearly two hours of work wasted."

Jake nodded slowly. "When did this happen?"

"A long time ago," William said.

Annie tried to remember. "I think I was fifteen."

Jake must have decided that was enough time for her to be over it. He turned back to William. "Is your sister still a terrible cook?"

A somewhat nasty grin popped up on William's face, mostly for Annie's benefit. Then he dropped it. "Not really. I actually like it when Annie cooks more than Mom most of the time. She's gotten better."

Annie smiled at her brother to acknowledge the compliment. Then she noticed that Jake also seemed to approve. She needed William to start listing her faults. She didn't know how to do that without asking straight out.

"Can I have your fries?" Michael was already reaching in front of Annie as he spoke.

"I, uh, I guess." Annie saw that Michael had already finished every scrap of food she'd put in front of him. It shouldn't have surprised her. He normally inhaled his food.

He tipped the box too far as he took it and all the fries slid out onto the tray. "Ohhh." He stretched the word, clearly unsure how to handle the mistake.

"I got it." Annie scooped the fries back into the box and handed it to her brother. She left a few on the tray for herself. Then she looked across the table at Jake to see if he noticed her greediness.

He smiled and bumped his eyebrows playfully before he took one of those fries for himself. He still had half of his fries left. The glance he sent Annie dared her to say something before he looked at Michael. "What can _you_ tell me about Annie?" he asked.

Michael turned to his sister.

Jake said, "Yes, that Annie."

William snickered.

"She's my sister," Michael said.

"I know." Jake looked between them. "You two look a bit alike."

"I'm Michael."

"I know. Your hair is the same shade of brown and your noses are similar."

"I'm Michael."

Jake nodded and moved on. "What can you tell me about Annie?"

"Annie likes pink."

"I do," Annie said. "I have two brothers. I have to assert my girliness now and then."

The interview continued. "What else does she like?"

William jumped in. "Not roller coasters! When we go to Cedar Point, she won't ride anything good. She likes..." He paused to insert a shudder. "...the carousel."

Jake laughed.

Annie defended her choice. "Not the regular carousel. Cedar Downs. The one with race horses."

"I ride the horses." Michael tipped his head dreamily. "I ride horses fast."

"We ride that carousel a lot," Annie said. "There's usually a short line."

William rolled his eyes. "I bet you don't show your face next year."

"Oh, they won't recognize us or anything."

"Wait, wait." Jake waved his hand between them. "What happened?"

"Michael had a seizure. I kept him from falling off. But I had to carry him when we left the ride. Someone said he fell and the employees called someone. We spent two hours at the first aid station convincing them that he wasn't injured on the ride. We had to wait for them to find Mom and Dad to verify our story."

William elbowed Jake. "The carousel is at least better than the first aid station ride."

"Yeah, do you..." Jake looked at Michael with equal parts surprise and confusion. "Is he asleep?"

Annie gave Michael a nudge with her arm. He was sleeping hard and gave no sign that he'd felt the nudge. "The meds make him drowsy," she said. "Guess you're not going to get dirt on me from him."

"No need," Jake said. "William is helping."

"Oh, yeah." William's eyes lit up. "I can tell you about the time Annie went to school in costume... on the wrong day!"

Annie put her head in her hands and groaned. She knew that story would come up. Showing up for Oregon Trail day a week early wasn't just her most embarrassing moment of ninth grade but of her entire life. Her mom had brought her a change of clothes so she'd endured only two periods of snickering.

William relished telling the story. He barely remembered it, and that was evident in his questionable facts. Annie let him talk because Jake seemed to know when he was exaggerating. William regaled them with a few other stories before Jake shared some from his life. The three of them were laughing after every last fry had been eaten.

Annie shook Michael awake when it was time to leave. She was a bit reluctant since she was enjoying herself. She'd forgotten she was trying to make a poor impression on Jake. But she'd also forgotten it was supposed to be a date. Hopefully, Jake had as well.

****

"He's going to ask you out again today," Mallory said.

"No, he's not." Annie pulled off her hat and smoothed down her hair. It wasn't quite as cold as she expected. "Saturday wasn't a date so there's no _again,_ and I brought my little brothers. I think that was a good hint of where I stand."

"But you had fun."

"We did. As friends."

"So you'd agree to do something with him again?"

Annie sighed and opened the door to the library. "Not the way you say it. You make 'do something' sound like a betrothal. Besides, he's not going to ask me out in the middle of the study group."

"It's just going to be four of us today. Aaron is taking Hannah out for her birthday."

"Oh, yeah. Still... we're here to study."

Mallory snorted. "You don't have any homework this week. You're here to hang out with Jake and make him fall for you even more."

Annie issued a playful shove in response. She wasn't going to argue against a relationship with Jake yet again.

He and Carlos were already at their usual table. They sat at opposite corners. Carlos had his back to the girls as they walked up and was laughing at something Jake said before Annie was close enough to hear. She took the seat next to Carlos and was about to ask what was so funny.

Mallory leaned close and made a sniffing noise in Annie's ear. It was a jab about her obviously smelling Carlos, which she hadn't even been thinking about. She gave Mallory a look that she hoped conveyed significant displeasure with her mock sniffing.

Jake smiled at either the sound effect or the reprimand. There was a lack of amusement in his eyes though that made Annie uneasy. She felt a sudden need to explain that she'd only sat next to Carlos out of habit. The thought caused several others to trip into a pile in her head. First was the knowledge that she had in fact taken the seat next to Carlos out of habit. Next was the idea that she wanted Jake to share that knowledge. Last was the dawning understanding that something had changed.

Somewhere between giving her mom flowers and treating her little brothers like friends, Jake had formed a connection to Annie. It wasn't anything like a lifelong bond, but it was enough to make Annie curious about a stronger connection. Curious and... interested. She unzipped the backpack at her feet and started pulling things out to cover her unexpectedly flustered state.

"What are you doing?" Mallory asked.

"I'm... getting ready."

"For what?" Mallory was sending her a concerned look. "You said you didn't have any homework tonight."

Annie was going to say she was getting ready to study. Surely she had something she could review. But Carlos spoke first.

"You don't have homework?" he said. "Great. _You_ can help me with this awful poem."

Jake groaned. "Well, she's got to be better than me."

"Yeah," Carlos said. "He wanted me to rhyme sunset with not yet."

"What?" Annie laughed and looked at Jake. So did Mallory.

He shrugged. "You didn't give me much to work with. Tell them what you have so far."

"I'm supposed to write couplets about something in nature," Carlos explained. "I have 'I'm sitting by the window to watch the sunset.'"

There was a pause before Mallory said, "That's it?"

"I'm not a poet," Carlos said. "Do you think if I wrote a few more random lines I could get half credit for half couplets?"

"Yet could work." Annie gathered some thoughts. "I'm sitting by the window to watch the sunset. I realize it hasn't started yet. The sky is still blue. Uh... lots of things rhyme with blue. Someone help me."

Mallory tried. "The sky is still blue. The grass is covered with dew. I guess it's still morning." She looked around the table for a suggestion.

Jake said, "How about... This very long wait will be boring. But if I sit all day I bet... I might get to see the sunset yet."

"We already used yet," Mallory said, trying to keep a straight face.

Annie was also working to swallow a laugh. It wasn't only awful because they'd used yet, and Jake's face said he knew it, too.

"We did." Jake winced again. "That was so terrible."

Carlos was writing it all down. "But it's pretty close guys. I'm just going to change the last two lines to 'But I have nothing else to do, maybe I'll watch the sun rise, too.'"

Annie didn't think that was much better. At least it was something Carlos wrote himself.

He closed that binder and opened a different one. "On to statistics," he said. "That class always has the most homework."

When he shifted to a new subject, Annie caught a whiff of that nice cologne. She still enjoyed the scent, but it was like smelling cookies. Nothing personal. She asked Mallory if she wanted to study Geology, the one class they had together. Jake finished the assignment he'd brought and took Annie's textbook to let the girls compete to guess vocabulary words.

Carlos finished his statistics, and they all began to pack up. The four of them walked away from the table together. "Wait one minute," Mallory said. "I want to check out a book while we're here." She disappeared between two shelves of fiction.

"See you next week." Carlos kept walking towards the exit.

Jake stopped next to Annie.

She felt her stomach turn sideways, then inside out. The idea that this was a chance for Jake to ask her out was now less unsettling than the idea that he might not take it.

"Are you going home again this weekend?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"Any plans here?"

She continued the side to side movement. "I don't know what I'm going to do."

"They're doing the first outdoor movie of the year on Saturday," he said.

"Already? It'll be cold."

"Probably. People will bring blankets."

"Do you know what they're showing?"

Now Jake shook his head. "Would you be interested in finding out? I mean, you and Mallory could both come with me to find out."

Annie smiled at the way he saved her the trouble of inviting another person. "Will you carry our blankets for us?"

"No matter what year it is."

She smiled again, more self-consciously because of his reference. "Okay. I'll tell Mallory."

****

"You're not going to try to talk me out of it?"

Annie stopped what she was doing to question Mallory. "Why would I try to talk you out of having a headache? That's not even possible."

"No, I mean talk me out of skipping the movie. Don't you want me to tag along to keep Jake from having ideas about it being a date?"

Annie was putting away the clothes she'd washed that day. She opened a drawer to drop in the last shirt. Then she turned around to face Mallory with her arms crossed. "There are several things wrong with what you just said."

Mallory smiled and said, "Oh, good... I feel a speech coming," with heavy sarcasm.

A laugh tried to come out in response, but Annie squelched it. "First of all," she said, "I am not a child. I don't need you to babysit me or Jake. Second of all, I'm not the sort of person who would ask my friend to suffer through a movie when she's not feeling well just to help me avoid an awkward conversation with a guy. And lastly..." She paused to figure out how to say she was glad Mallory decided not to come without saying she was glad Mallory decided not to come. "Well, I might not be as against Jake having ideas as I used to be."

"Oh!" Mallory got excited before she put her hand to her forehead, an indication of how poorly high-pitched noises and headaches went together.

"If he hasn't given up," Annie added.

"Uh... he invited you to the movie tonight."

"He invited both of us."

Mallory answered with an exasperated sigh.

"I know," Annie said. "I'm just nervous, okay?" It did seem a little unnecessary when Jake had been so persistent. But Annie was invested now. She couldn't help worrying that she'd rejected him one too many times.

"Have fun," Mallory said.

"Thanks." Annie put on her coat and grabbed a neatly folded blanket. She hugged it to her chest as she went downstairs to meet Jake.

He was early. Jake was standing just inside the lobby door with a Cleveland Browns blanket draped over his shoulder. He was staring out the window and hadn't noticed Annie yet.

She walked towards him with ridiculous concentration. She wanted to hurry because he was waiting. She didn't want to hurry and seem overeager. Then again, overeager might be a good thing after all the times she'd said they'd only ever be friends. But she couldn't move her arms. She'd look funny walking fast holding a blanket. Walking slowly and casually would make a better impression. Not too slowly though. The guy wasn't even looking at her while she deliberated her steps.

Jake turned as she got close and smiled with surprise. "Where's Mallory?" he asked.

"She's not coming," Annie said. "She's not feeling well."

"That's too bad." Jake looked as though he meant it, which was good. Compassion was good.

Annie gave herself a mental kick for wanting him to look happier at the change in plans.

He looked more uncertain than anything. "You're still coming?" he asked.

"Sure." Annie wiggled the blanket that should have made her intention clear, then she joked, "But it better be a good movie."

Jake laughed. "No promises. Other than the fact that we can leave any time you want." He turned and took a step to open the door for Annie.

She walked out more relaxed than before. Jake was a nice guy. She was going to have a nice time. But they were not going to watch a movie. Instead of finding students gathering on the lawn, they began to pass people bundled or carrying blankets going the opposite direction.

One of those people, a girl with short black hair, said, "Are you two headed to the movie? They're not doing it."

"It's canceled?" Jake asked.

"I don't know," the girl said. "No one seems to know anything. It's just not happening." She continued past Annie and Jake to catch up to her friends.

Jake stopped and faced Annie. "Are we going to turn around?"

She stared at him, also at a loss. "Well... I don't know."

"I wonder what happened." Jake tipped his head to the side.

"I, uh..." Annie found herself trying not to laugh at the helplessness with which they both seemed to be facing this minor hurdle. The library was right in front of her. "Let's go to the library instead," she suggested.

"Okay."

Annie fell into step next to him. The walk was quiet. She figured it was only a matter of time before he asked what they were going to do at the library because she had no idea what they were going to do.

They entered the building with neither of them mentioning a plan. There were several study tables along the far side where their group typically met on Thursdays. Only a few people sat in that area, but Annie motioned Jake to the elevator. There was more study space on the 6th floor, and she hoped to find that empty. It was a Saturday after all. The space appeared deserted as they exited the elevator. There were shelves along the walls that could hide people. It was extremely quiet and the tables were all unclaimed. Annie walked past all of them to the window. She looked down to the lawn where the movie was supposed to be shown. Three blankets were spread out with students milling about between them. "I guess those guys couldn't think of anything else to do either," she observed.

When Jake didn't respond, she turned to see that he was not right behind her. He'd dropped his blanket on one of the tables and was standing at a computer catalog. The screen was blank, and he seemed to be doing something next to the keyboard.

Annie put her blanket on top of his and walked towards him.

He turned around before she reached him. He had folded one of the slips of paper into a tiny airplane. He tried to fly it to her, or at her.

The paper plane did an immediate nosedive and hit the ground hard between them. They both laughed.

Then Jake raised his eyebrows and said, "Can you do better?"

"Probably not," Annie admitted. "But I'll give it a shot."

She took a piece of paper and folded a little airplane while Jake straightened the tip of his. Then they stood next to each other and flew them at the same time. Jake tossed his more gently and it flew farther than the first time. Annie's flew towards the ceiling before it crashed right next to her. "That was not better," she said.

"Not yet." Jake jogged over to retrieve his plane. "Let's see who can land one on that table first."

"That table?" Annie pointed to the one right in front of her.

"No, that one." Jake pointed across the room.

"Does it have to be a pretty landing?"

Jake smiled. "It only has to stop on the table."

"All right. But I'm making a new one."

"Not me." Jake squeezed the tip of his plane to flatten the crease. "I'm sticking with this one. I'm going to call it Crisp Wings."

"Crisp Wings?" Annie bit her lip against a laugh. "That sounds like a cereal."

"It's not like I've given it a lot of thought, but it's a fine name. What are you calling yours?"

Annie was working on her new plane. She flipped it over and pressed down the second wing. Then she smiled teasingly and said, "Victor."

"That's going to be a terrible name when it loses." Jake tossed his plane towards the agreed upon table. It landed under the table next to it.

"I think you mean _if_ it loses," Annie said. She aimed Victor and flew it softly. It went sideways and about half as far as Jake's, which only made her enjoy the name more. They both flew their planes at least ten times before Jake managed to land his on the very edge of the table.

He raised an arm in celebration. "I can't believe you doubted Crisp Wings."

Annie laughed again at the name. It definitely took any sting out of losing. "Let's make it harder," she said.

"Are you sure you want to do that?"

Annie just nodded. She grabbed four large books off the nearest shelf and arranged them on the table so that their spines formed a rectangle. "You have to get a plane in here."

Jake held his tiny airplane up to show that he was ready.

Annie returned to the computer and picked up three more pieces of paper. "I'm going to try a few more," she said.

With extra planes, she didn't have to retrieve them as often. Annie got in two or three tries for each of Jake's. She still wasn't getting anywhere near the target. Neither was Jake. He insisted on using the same plane until the tip was crumpled beyond hope, then he folded Crisp Wings 2. It only got a few flights before Annie said, "I give up."

"Me, too." Jake picked up his plane and frowned at it. "I don't think the paper wants to cooperate. It's not us."

Annie looked at the books she'd used for a target, intending to put them away. One was an art book. She began to flip through the many pictures in its pages. "Oh, I like this one." She stopped at a painting of angels. Jake came up to look over her shoulder.

A frisson of warmth flooded Annie's face. She thought of all the times she'd insisted to Mallory that she'd never be attracted to Jake. All times she'd been wrong.

"I like when artists draw angels like this," he said, studying the page. "More majestic than cute."

"Me, too." Annie lingered for a moment before she turned the page. She paused again. This time with puzzlement instead of appreciation.

"Is that a tree?" Jake asked.

Annie turned the book sideways. "I don't think so."

"Oh." He put his finger on some text near the picture. "It's underground tunnels."

"Okay." Annie turned another page.

They continued to discuss the artwork in the book until a disembodied voice said, "Attention students. The library will be closing in ten minutes."

Annie looked at her watch. "The library closes at nine on Saturdays?"

"Apparently," Jake said with a shrug.

Annie closed the book. She took all four of them back to the shelf. Jake picked up their blankets and met her at the elevator. They made pleasant chitchat on the way back to Annie's dorm. She felt a strange tension grow as their destination got closer. She knew she'd see Jake again at the study group if they didn't make other plans. But it still felt important to say something about getting together again. It would acknowledge the shift Annie felt in the relationship.

When they stopped at the door, Jake handed her the blanket she'd brought for nothing. Annie swallowed some butterflies and said, "Do you think they'll do a movie next Saturday?"

"I hope so. And I hope you'll come with me to find out again because this was fun." He took a step back and started talking faster. "I mean, I know this wasn't a date. I didn't mean that. I'm not trying to be pushy. I'd just like to spend some more time with you. Do you want to try again next week?"

Annie let her eyes drop to the ground. She wasn't sure how to answer. Of course she wanted to go with him again. That's why she'd brought it up. But he'd just insisted it wouldn't mean anything and she didn't want to agree to that.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

"No." She tried to look at Jake. Her eyes hovered around his collar where she could see his Adam's apple moving up and down. "It's just... well, I kind of thought it _was_ a date."

Jake didn't say anything.

Annie lifted her eyes nervously.

A blank look covered his face. Then he nodded and said, "That's good to know," as he turned to leave.

Annie gaped after him, wanting to believe he'd done something wrong when all he'd done was crush her ego by not looking thrilled at her change of heart.

He stopped after only two steps and looked back. "So, uh... next week would be a date, too?" he asked. His calm appearance was cracking all over the place as his eyes danced and his mouth twitched to hold back a smile. Clearly, he was thrilled and trying to play it cool.

"Yes," Annie said. "See you Thursday?"

Jake nodded. He would see her at the study group. Finally, she would see him, too.

The End

I hope you enjoyed this short story. Annie and Jake appear as minor characters in They See a Family. Check it out to see where they are eleven years later. Keep reading for a sample of They See a Family.

### They See a Family

Amanda Hamm

Copyright 2018 Amanda Hamm

All rights reserved. Before Someday Publishing

They See a Family is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places, events, etc. are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously.

1

Kay was babysitting when she got the call. She needed to get to the hospital. But she was babysitting. She had no car seats for the little ones. She couldn't drive to the hospital without car seats. Her first thought was to go to the store on the way so she could buy car seats. But she couldn't drive to the store either. Her brain swirled around what seemed an impossible problem. She couldn't leave home without car seats, and she couldn't get car seats without leaving home.

It couldn't be real. Kay felt overpowered by the situation and needed someone to rescue her. William. William could bring her car seats. She fished in her purse for her phone while the infant in her other arm began to fuss. "Shh," she whispered. "I'm gonna take care of both of you. Just hang on a minute." She lightly bounced her arm up and down as she waited for William to answer.

"Kay. How'd the babysitting go?"

"I need help."

"Two under two is a bit much to handle, huh?"

"No, I really need help. They were in an accident. I need to go to the hospital, but I don't have car seats. Can you go to the store and buy car seats and bring them to me? I'll pay you back."

"Whoa. Slow down." His tone became serious and businesslike. "Rob and Beth were in an accident?"

"Yeah. I need to go, and I'm stuck here with the babies."

"Couldn't I just come over and watch them for you?"

"No. No, I need to take them because..." She couldn't say it. She couldn't say out loud that when her sister found out her husband was dead – if she didn't know already – she would need to hold her babies. They would get her through this. "I just need car seats."

"How old are they exactly?"

"Two months and thirteen months."

"Two months and thirteen months." William seemed to be repeating the ages to commit them to memory. "Okay. I'll call Annie from the store. She can tell me what you need. I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Thanks." Kay hung up and dropped her phone on the counter. Pete had worked himself into a full wail while they talked. She pulled him into her chest and held him. "Time for that bottle Mommy left for you." She pulled the bottle from the fridge and gave it a little shake. The milk had separated somewhat.

"Here we go." She sat with Pete on her couch and positioned him in the crook of her arm. His brother, Will, was sitting on the floor playing with the laces on a pair of Kay's shoes. She held the nipple in his mouth, wiggling it against his bottom lip, and he continued to cry. "Here it is," she whispered soothingly. He turned his head away and cried harder.

"Oh, you're used to it warm, aren't you? Sorry, sweetie, I'm a little scattered at the moment. I know I should warm it." Kay shook her head, trying to focus, as she returned to the kitchen. Beth had said something about not putting it in the microwave. Kay turned hot water on at the sink and held the bottle under it.

Will crawled after her to see what was going on. She smiled at him; he smiled back. Then she put her attention on the bottle. She was trying to calm Pete with some jiggles, and it wasn't doing any good. Every time she pulled the bottle out of the stream of water, the milk inside seemed just as cold as when she started.

A whimper made her look back at Will. His face was scrunched up in the beginning of a cry. For no reason she could see. "No." Kay shook her head. "Don't cry. Everything's fine. There's no reason to cry." She offered him an encouraging smile.

Apparently, he didn't believe her because he burst into real tears. And why should he believe her? She was lying to him. Everything wasn't fine. His father was dead. His life was forever changed. His aunt was incapable of even warming up a bottle. Between the two crying babies and the rushing water, Kay felt everything in her already tiny apartment begin to shrink. No wonder Beth had looked so happy when she left for a night out.

Kay took a deep breath. She shut off the water and set down the bottle. She crouched on the floor and patted Will's back. She couldn't pick them both up without risking dropping one. Will settled somewhat with the attention. She looked desperately around the room for something to entertain him, something that would keep him busy while she figured out how to feed the smaller baby.

Perhaps he'd like to bang on a pot. She reached over and opened a lower cabinet. Before she could pull out a pot, Will's little hands slapped across the floor to grab the door. He sat up and opened and closed it several times as though it was the most fascinating thing he'd ever seen. All the cabinets at Rob and Beth's house had latches. There probably was some novelty to doors that opened freely.

How much time it would give her to deal with Pete she didn't know. She picked up the bottle again. It seemed to have at least gotten to room temperature. Maybe that was good enough. She held the nipple in Pete's mouth and moved it around, trying to get him to start sucking. He was frantic and still ignoring the food.

She set the bottle down yet again and tipped Pete up to her shoulder and bounced him as she walked in a circle. Surely he'd take the bottle if she could get him to calm down a little first. He did begin to quiet and soon she realized he had cried himself to sleep. That was fine. The bottle could wait. But should it wait in the refrigerator? Kay didn't want to have to start over warming it. How long could it sit out and not spoil? Beth referred to breast milk as liquid gold. That felt appropriate as Kay looked at less than four ounces of milk and knew it was the only thing in her entire place she could feed to her nephew.

Maybe she should have asked William to buy formula, too. Maybe they should get some on the way to the hospital. Kay didn't know anything about Beth's injuries. What if she'd been given medication that would prevent her from nursing? They should buy formula just in case. At least that would come with instructions.

Will had moved on to another cupboard to see if it opened, too. Kay's kitchen was peaceful for the moment. She closed her eyes in prayer. "Please, God, let Beth be okay. Help her to cope with this loss. Give me the strength to help her. She won't be alone with these babies. We'll both help her."

Pete sighed heavily and shifted in her arms. Kay tried to imagine God holding her like she held the baby. She breathed a little easier but felt too much tension to let it all out the way Pete had. She was calm enough to be practical though. She went back to her phone and texted William to buy formula. Then she paced her apartment, hoping the movement would keep Pete asleep.

He was still sleeping on her shoulder when William arrived. The huge box in his hands barely fit through her doorway. He dropped it on the floor and smiled at Will like he was delivering a gift. "This is for you."

His demeanor became more serious as he addressed Kay. "When I called Annie, she said they had an infant seat their youngest has outgrown that you could have. She even drove to the store with it so I'd only have to make one stop. The next time I complain about my sister, you can remind me of this." He paused to give a friendly wave to Will, who had backed himself to the far side of the room and was staring at William. Then he ripped open the box. He pulled out a gray car seat and sat on the floor next to it with an instruction booklet. He tore off some plastic and threw some tags to the side. "Sorry I'm making a mess."

"I'm not worried about that right now." Kay's voice trembled and she jiggled Pete a little faster, as though he was the one who needed comfort.

William nodded briskly and returned his attention to the car seat. He turned a few pages in the instructions, tilted the seat back, fussed with the straps. He looked at Will and frowned. "All right, buddy, you're probably not going to like this, but I need to measure you." He got up, trying to force a reassuring smile.

Will tucked himself into a ball as William approached, clearly not wanting the strange man to pick him up. His legs quivered as William put his hands under his arms and carried him to the car seat.

William spoke to him calmly, telling him it would only take a few seconds and how he'd get to ride in the seat soon. He marked the height of the baby's shoulder in the seat, nodded to himself, then set Will back on the floor. He went to work threading the straps.

Will quickly crawled to Kay and wrapped his little arms around her ankles as Pete woke up again. The infant squirmed and thrashed. He was working up the energy for another screaming fit. Kay pulled her leg free of Will and rushed to the kitchen, hoping she could get the bottle in Pete's mouth before he started crying. It didn't work. The baby still wouldn't take the bottle, and his brother started crying because she'd walked away from him.

Kay sat on the floor at the edge of the kitchen. She set Pete on her legs so that his head rested in the crook of her elbow and held the bottle in the same hand, aiming it more or less at his mouth. She held the other arm out to Will as he crawled onto her other leg. The older baby settled against her, but the smaller one became more frantic. She bounced her knee under him and tried to convince him that what was in the bottle was the same thing he got from his mom. It just had a different shape.

"Can I do anything?" William had paused in adjusting the car seat. His eyes looked at Kay with equal parts sympathy and helplessness.

"You are helping," Kay said. "Just get us in the car. I think they both want their mommy."

He nodded again. His eyes didn't immediately return to the instructions though. Instead, he asked, "How bad is it?"

Kay knew he meant the accident. She was too busy juggling babies to think of a softer way to deliver the news. "Rob's dead," she said.

William gasped. The shocked expression on his face somehow made the situation more real.

Kay fought hard against something that threatened to be a very ugly cry. She'd never get Pete calm if she lost control of herself.

The instruction booklet crinkled in William's hand as he threw it into the car seat. He stood and yanked the car seat off the floor. Two metal buckles clinked together as they dangled from either end of a strap hanging out the back. "I'm going to get this installed," he said, "then I'll come back with the infant one."

Little Will started crying again as the door closed. "Make up your mind," Kay mumbled. "You didn't like William and now you're mad that he's gone?" She rubbed his back. "Can you help me feed Pete? Do you want to hold the bottle?"

He either didn't understand or wasn't interested. He just cried. Pete was wailing so hard that silent gasps interrupted his cry and valuable milk was dripping down his chin, not his throat.

"This isn't working." Kay shifted Will off her lap and set down the bottle. She stood with the baby and laid his head against her shoulder. "Come with me." She motioned Will to follow her and he did, still crying. She pulled a pan out of her cupboard and set it on the floor. She grabbed a wooden spoon, tapped on the bottom to give Will the idea, then tried to hand it to him.

Will stopped crying, which was something. He didn't seem to have any interest in the spoon though. He crawled past it to the cupboard where Kay had gotten the pan. He opened it and began to pull all the other pans onto the floor.

While he was busy, Kay focused on Pete again. His cries were beginning to hurt her, not her ears but something inside that wanted to help him and couldn't. "Why won't you eat?" She held him in front of her and tried to look into his eyes. They were shut tight in the effort of crying. "Should we check your diaper?"

She hated to put him down while he cried, but Kay gently laid him on the carpet to open his jammies for an investigation. She squeezed the outside of the diaper. It didn't feel wet, but she got a fresh one on him anyway. Then she scooped him up again and tried again to get him to suck on the bottle.

She knew he hadn't yet taken a bottle. That wasn't supposed to be a problem though. Beth had fed him right before she left. They were only supposed to be gone around two hours. The bottle was a just in case that shouldn't have been necessary. But the two-month-old had now gone four hours without eating. He should be hungry enough to want it. He arched his back and stubbornly turned away from the artificial nipple.

Kay picked up the bib around his neck and dabbed at his chin. The cloth was soaked. She unsnapped it and dropped it on the floor. There was a burp rag somewhere.

Will had a small saucepan and was using both his hands to lift and drop it against another pan. The repeated metal on metal made an awful clanging noise. But he was smiling. That made the noise bearable to Kay. She was picking up the burp rag when William returned through her front door.

"I think we're ready," he said. "Annie thinks she got this one about right for a two-month-old. He held up an infant carrier. It was covered in pink plaid, but Pete was much too young to care about using something designed for a girl. Kay glanced at the green carrier he'd arrived in. She didn't have the base it snapped into and wondered if that had been damaged in the accident. Pete might have to get used to the pink one. But the crash had also stolen his dad – he wouldn't even have memories of Rob – so a car seat seemed like an insignificant loss.

Kay bent over the plaid car seat with the baby and looked up at William. "Can you get Will buckled for me?"

"Sure."

She tried to push Pete's arms under the straps as gently as she could with him fighting her. He was still crying but with less intensity. It was almost as though he'd given up trying to tell her anything. She hoped he was sleepy and would fall asleep in the car. Beth could feed him soon after they arrived. God willing.

Surprisingly, Will was still smiling as William carried him out the door. It took Kay forever to warm up to new people and Will looked comfortable after ten minutes. She tried to be grateful and not jealous. Less crying was a good thing at the moment. It was a good thing at any moment. She clicked the buckles between Pete's tiny legs and stood as she thought of what she needed.

There was a grocery bag on the floor near the car seat box with a can of formula showing through the plastic. William had evidently gotten her text in time. She grabbed that, stuffed it in the diaper bag Beth left. Then she grabbed her purse and the diaper bag and baby carrier. She set everything down on the landing to lock her door before she picked it all up again and made her way down the stairs.

She rented the top half of a duplex. There was a small parking lot off an alley behind the house, which was where her car was. But William was standing near the street, next to his car, and Will was in the back seat.

Kay approached him with confusion. She assumed he was putting the car seats in her car.

He appeared to understand her puzzled expression. "I'll drive you," he said.

He sort of had to since moving the car seats would be a huge hassle. Kay just nodded and snapped Pete's seat into its base. She sent a quick wave to Will, eyes flitting rapidly around the unfamiliar car.

"Which hospital?" William asked as he pulled his own seat belt into position.

"St. Charles."

He nodded and started the car.

2

"Do you know anything about how your sister's doing?"

Kay shook her head sadly. Not knowing was hard. What if no one had told her about Rob? What if they had, and she was all alone? Beth and Rob had a beautiful relationship. They'd met in college. They dated more than three years before they got married so no one could say they rushed into it. Beth's heart had rushed though. She'd called Kay after her first date with Rob and told her sister that she'd enjoyed the evening with her future husband.

Tears sprang to Kay's eyes as she thought about the two of them on their wedding day and when they announced they were expecting – both times – and so many other happy times. She was still getting to know Rob and now she would have to save what memories she had.

"Do you know what happened?" William's voice interrupted the flood of memories. Probably only a second before the tears would have fallen freely.

"Someone ran a red light. That's all I know. Rob was dead at the scene. Beth was taken... I was the top contact in Beth's... Oh, no! I wonder if someone called my dad. Or Rob's parents. I haven't..." Kay thought about calling her dad. She'd been so focused on trying to get to the hospital and a little frazzled by the babies. "Would it be better to wait until I actually know something before I call my dad? I mean, since he can't be here anyway."

William blew out a puff of air and winced. "I'm not sure there's a right answer. We'll be there soon though. Hopefully, we'll know something soon."

"Yeah." The back seat was quiet. "Maybe Pete went to sleep again. I hope he can wait until... Oh, no! I left his bottle on the counter. It'll go to waste. And I brought the formula and nothing to put it in. Someday, I'm going to be the worst mother."

"Kay..." William sent her a worried glance. "Don't beat yourself up. This is a difficult and unexpected situation. We'll figure something... There are babies at a hospital, right? Surely there are bottles. And I can go buy some if we can't get our hands on one."

Kay tried to calm down. The way he kept saying _we_ helped. William wasn't just a ride to the hospital. He was going to stick by her side until she didn't need him anymore. "Thanks for coming to get me and... everything."

"I... you're welcome." He squirmed visibly in response to gratitude.

That felt very typical and in spite of everything else going on, it made a small smile flash on Kay's face. "Why does it always look like you're welcome is hard to say?"

"Only to you."

"You don't like it when I thank you for something?"

He sighed. "I worry you'll catch on to my ulterior motives for being nice."

An ulterior motive for being nice? That sounded like a joke. It wasn't a time for jokes, and William looked completely serious. Kay was quiet long enough that it would have been weird to say something anyway. She simply turned and looked out the window.

They were nearly to the hospital already. Fear gripped Kay's heart. She'd been trying to think of nothing but getting to her sister's side. As the brown brick building came into view, her mind involuntarily began to process scary possibilities. Beth could be seriously injured. What if she had to stay in the hospital for days? Weeks?

There was no question that Kay would take care of the boys for as long as necessary. The question was _how_ she'd do it. She was feeling like a failure after one evening. She couldn't feed Pete, couldn't figure out when his diaper needed to be changed. Will was up way past his bedtime and probably cried more in the last few hours than he ever did with Beth.

And what about Beth? What if she was left with a permanent disability? What if Rob had no life insurance? Kay didn't know anything about her sister's financial situation. Their family didn't talk about money.

"I'm just going to park in this lot so we can go in the emergency room." William's calm, practical voice filled the car and once again drove away the threatening emotions. "Surely someone in there can tell us where to find Beth."

Kay nodded. A strange detachment settled over her as her mind seemed to emphasize mundane things like the arrows on the signs and the way the parking lot had crisp, freshly painted lines. She sat motionless as the car stopped.

William reached over and touched her hand. It wasn't a caress or a squeeze, just a light tap that reminded Kay that he was there.

"Okay," she said. "Let's go." She pulled in a lungful of air as she yanked on the door handle.

Both babies had fallen asleep. William managed to unbuckle the older one and pull him into his arms without waking him. And it didn't take him any longer than it took Kay to figure out how to get Pete's infant seat detached from its base.

The emergency room shocked Kay with stillness. Fictional ERs were not set in rural Ohio. No one was running or pushing a gurney or yelling, "Stat!" There were four people in the waiting room, sitting as far from each other as possible. One of them coughed. A TV in the corner was playing a news channel. It was muted. Two women were behind a counter staring at computer monitors.

If it weren't for her racing heart, Kay might have felt as though she'd shown up early for some appointment. She walked up to the closer woman and opened her mouth.

The woman behind the counter spoke first. "Which baby is sick?"

"Neither," Kay said. "I'm, uh, my sister was in an accident. She should—"

"She'll help you with that." The woman nodded her head towards the other woman, cutting Kay off without even taking her eyes off the monitor.

Kay took a few steps to her left to place herself in front of the other woman behind the counter. She'd evidently heard – though her eyes also remained glued to the screen in front of her – because she said, "What's your sister's name?"

"Elizabeth Fisher."

The woman nodded, typed something, made a few mouse clicks, typed again. After what felt like a very long pause, her eyes finally moved from the monitor. They looked straight past Kay to the waiting room. "Have a seat over there," she said. "Someone will be out to update you shortly."

Kay turned and walked to the chairs, but she felt too restless to make use of one. She gently bounced her leg against Pete's car seat, hoping the movement would be similar enough to a car ride to keep him asleep. "Just a little longer," she whispered to him.

William didn't sit either. He shifted his weight slowly side to side. He was probably trying to keep Will asleep as well. The effort was unnecessary. The older baby was completely limp, his mouth hanging open, and appeared to be sleeping hard.

At five foot seven, Kay was not overly tall for a woman, which meant that William might be considered on the short side. He wasn't stocky or round. He didn't look short unless Kay was standing right next to him eye to eye as they were right then. And then he only seemed short if she thought about it. She was thinking of his eyes though. They were blue like Beth's.

Kay had thought her sister's brown hair and blue eye combination was rare when they were kids. Both of their parents had brown eyes to match their hair, just like Kay. Somehow she'd gotten it into her head that only blond people had blue eyes and she didn't pay enough attention to correct the assumption until at least her teen years. Beth had been an exception, special.

She was still special even if it had nothing to do with her eyes, and Kay still didn't notice a person's eye color until she'd spent a fair amount of time with him. That was where William was an exception. They'd met at work, only a few weeks after Kay finished college. She couldn't say what made her look so closely when he was introduced, but she immediately noticed the blue and brown combination she'd once thought rare.

She might have been gawking rather absently at him when he said, "Do you want me to try to find a bottle right away so we'll have it if, uh..." He gestured to the sleeping infant. "Or do you want me to stay with you."

"Stay," Kay said, which was kind of weird because she wanted him to go find a bottle. She was afraid Pete was going to wake up screaming, and she'd not be able to comfort him. The other people in the room would assume she was his mom and a terrible one. But she asked William to stay with her.

He didn't nod or say anything. He simply stayed.

They stood side by side in silence, swaying to different imaginary rhythms. The woman behind the counter must have had a loose definition of shortly because it seemed to take a very long time for anyone to come out to talk to them. Someone in scrubs appeared but approached someone else, then took that man down a hallway and out of sight. One of the women at the counter called out a name and made Kay jump. Someone else in the waiting room approached the counter.

Finally, a man in a white coat came through a door Kay hadn't noticed until it opened. He went up to the counter, and the woman behind it pointed at Kay. _At last_ , she thought. The man in the white coat walked towards her. This was the person who would take her to Beth.

"I'm Dr. Everet," he said. "You're Elizabeth Fisher's family?"

"Her sister. Katherine Donovan."

The doctor nodded and held out a hand, not to shake but to point at the chairs behind Kay and William. "Have a seat," he said.

Kay just shook her head. There was no point sitting down if she was going to have to get up in a minute to see Beth. "How is she?" she asked, though she meant to ask _where_ she was. Her brain and her mouth did not seem to be communicating properly.

"Well... she lost a lot of blood before she got here. We worked for a long time and did everything we could. Her injuries, however..." The doctor paused to draw in a long breath. "There was nothing we could do to save her. I'm very sorry."

A firm hand took Kay's elbow and guided her into the nearest chair. She set the car seat at her feet and noticed that Pete had started to squirm. She began to panic over the coming cry because that was easier than letting what the doctor said sink in. "I can't feed him," Kay said.

"Do you need someplace private to nurse?" Dr. Everet asked.

She shook her head, annoyed that he wasn't understanding her any better than she was understanding him. "No," she snapped. " _I_ can't feed him. This is my sister's baby."

Pete let out a wail that echoed her frustration.

"Oh! I can help." The doctor looked pleased either for something to do or a reason to leave. He took off at a jog.

Kay leaned forward and unbuckled the infant's straps. She carefully pulled him from the seat and nestled him in her arms. She didn't rock or jiggle or try to offer words of comfort. She only held him. She didn't want him to be upset, yet she welcomed the cry that made thinking difficult.

Dr. Everet returned quickly and handed her a bottle of formula. It was warm. Kay's brain latched onto the temperature of the formula as the most important thing to think about. She ignored everyone except Pete. "Hey, little one. It's warm." She wiggled the nipple in his mouth. He didn't put up a fight. He sucked hungrily, hiccupping around the bottle as his cries subsided. "I didn't get it warm enough, did I? Was that the problem before? How do you think the doctor did that so fast? He wasn't gone long. I don't think it was a long time." Kay was desperately trying to picture an emergency stash of warm bottles somewhere in the hospital. She wanted to be amazed by the idea because she didn't want to think about anything else.

A stray thought pushed into her head, pushed aside her efforts to think only of warm bottles. It was a thought so scary she couldn't fully process it. But it was there all the same. The baby in her arms was an orphan.

\----

Kay Donovan woke up on the floor. Movement seemed to have woken her, footsteps. She opened her eyes and saw William stepping quietly around the room. He was picking up bits of plastic and dropping them into the large car seat box he'd opened the previous night.

"What time is it?" she whispered to him.

"After ten." He winced. "I didn't mean to wake you."

She waved off the apology as she sat up. "If it's after ten, I should be up." She rose only to sitting and looked around her apartment. There was a green tunnel probably eight feet long stretched nearly the length of her living room. Will popped out one end of it with a grin on his face before he turned around and crawled back in.

Pete was asleep in his new pink car seat. He wasn't buckled so he was slumped against one side. He didn't look particularly comfortable, but he looked asleep so Kay wasn't going to move him. There was a grocery bag on the kitchen table next to a box of Cheerios.

The Cheerios jogged her memory. Sometime around 5 am, William had asked what they were going to feed Will for breakfast. Kay said she'd seen him eat Cheerios but didn't have any. Unconcerned with the early hour, William had called his sister Annie for advice as he left for the store again.

Will had opened his eyes while William was gone. Kay lay down next to him, hoping to keep him quiet and possibly disposed to sleep more. She had watched his eyes flutter closed but hadn't intended to go to sleep herself. She'd been only vaguely aware of William's return. Altogether, it'd been a very long night. The tunnel seemed to be the only thing her sleepy brain couldn't explain. "Where did that come from?"

"My house," William said.

That wasn't really an explanation.

William seemed to realize as much. He stopped tidying up and looked at Kay. "I stopped at home for a shower on my way to the store and thought... I bought that for my nieces at some point and thought it might entertain Will."

"At some point? How have I never noticed a giant lime green tunnel at your place?"

"It folds up."

"Oh. That's good to know." Kay pushed aside the blanket – she didn't remember taking it off her bed – and stood to stretch. Other bits of information began to come back to her. The sister she'd waved to so casually. The doctor who said he was sorry. The heart-rending phone call with her dad, who was going to handle everything when he got to town. She only needed to hold herself together until then. Kay tried to think practically about how to get through the next few hours. "It's Sunday," she said. "I need to go to church."

"You don't..." William appeared to consider what he wanted to say. "This is a difficult day, not a normal Sunday at all. I think God will understand if you can't make it to mass."

Kay glanced at the clock. There was a mass at eleven. She could make it if she hurried. "I need normal," she said.

"Okay. Will's been up about two hours. Pete's been asleep almost as long. He only drank half the last bottle. I... uh... I don't know if it's helpful to know any of that, but I guess... I'll watch them while you get ready."

"Thanks." Kay went into her bedroom and picked out a blue dress with white polka dots and took everything she'd wear with it into her bathroom. She showered quickly. She usually liked long showers to let her mind wander. There was no good place for her mind to go that Sunday. When the water shut off, she heard crying. She tried to dress quickly, but the lingering steam made her clothes stick to her. Then as the crying softened, she heard William's voice. He was trying to sing a lullaby but didn't know most of the words.

Kay stood with her hand on the doorknob and listened.

"Rock-a-bye, baby, in the treetop. Why is the baby in the treetop? I don't know the words to this song. But you stopped crying so I'm singing along. Rock-a-bye, baby, la la la la."

This was so far from normal. Kay wondered if anything would ever be normal again. Yet the moment wasn't as sad as it would have been without William. Did he plan to go to church with them, too? She was afraid to ask, afraid he'd say no. He'd need to leave eventually though. Kay was just going to continue getting through one minute at a time. Maybe her dad would arrive before William left. The babies needed her either way. She was not going to fall apart.

William looked up when she opened the door. He was holding a baby in each arm. Pete was lying across his left forearm and Will was held right-side up with the other arm. That meant William had no hands free to stop the older baby from grabbing his face. Will was tugging on his ear with one hand and trying to put his other fingers inside his nostrils. William was moving his head side to side to avoid such exploration. "Uh... I need some help," he said.

"Looks like you have everything under control."

"No, really, I'm stuck." William sent her a plaintive glance. "I picked them both up and now I can't figure out how to put either one down."

"Okay. Come here little guy." Kay scooped up Pete and held him against her shoulder. He immediately made a belching noise that explained the warm wet spot on the back of her dress. "Oh, what did you do?" She pulled him away to look him in the eye when she asked the question even though she already knew the answer.

Pete grinned at her, a big toothless grin.

She couldn't hold back a small smile in response. "I see you at least feel bad about it."

He kept smiling at her.

"All right. Come with me while I change." Kay turned with the baby and laid him on the middle of her bed while she changed to a different blue dress with no polka dots. She was about to pick him up again when it occurred to her that the plain navy dress would be appropriate for a funeral.

Her hands froze right over her sister's child. Pete was so helpless, so innocent. His little legs kicked at the air while Kay blinked furiously to keep the tears from falling. It wasn't sad to return the dress to her closet, it was practical. She would likely need it in a few days. And she would need it to not be covered in spit-up.

The pink dress would work for church. She slipped her feet into a pair of sandals and grabbed Pete. She carried him out of the bedroom at arm's length to hunt down a dry cloth.

William was pacing with Will still in his arms. They looked surprisingly comfortable together, almost as though they hadn't been thrown together under the worst circumstances.

"All right." Kay flipped a rag onto her shoulder and held Pete there. It was the last dry one. "What do we need?"

William shrugged.

"I'm thinking out loud."

"I still don't know."

"Food, I guess. We must be almost out of diapers. Do we have enough to get through church?"

William stared for a moment, then said, "Are you talking to me now?"

"Yes."

"I bought diapers." He pointed to the shopping bag on the table. "But I don't know how many we need for church."

She nodded before walking to the table. She pulled out a package and tried to open it with one hand. Her fingers squeezed fruitlessly at the plastic. Then they slipped off and sent the diapers flying to the floor.

Will cracked up. William had enough sense to try to hide his chuckle.

Kay set Pete on the carpet near where the diapers landed and ripped into the package with both hands. Then she did the same to the larger size for Will and stuffed a few of each into the bag Beth had left with the babies. There were a few toys in there and a change of clothes for Will but not Pete. They'd already used up the infant's spare outfit.

"I guess Will should stay in his clothes from yesterday for now. I need to do laundry. I need more clothes for them both. And we need to go." She looked at the clock and wondered how Beth had ever gotten anywhere on time. She couldn't breathe. She opened her mouth and couldn't figure out how to breathe. She'd just thought of her sister in the past tense. It was impossible to do that and breathe at the same time.

3

Kay had been on the verge of tears at least a dozen times since William had arrived with car seats. He knew she couldn't fight it forever. She really had lost her best friend. Crying would be healthy and natural. She might even need to cry. That was why William felt like the worst kind of person for hoping each time that she'd mange to wait a little longer. It was going to be so hard to watch.

It was hard to watch her be miserable and know there was absolutely nothing he could do to fix it. It was about to happen anyway. Kay was crouched by the diaper bag gasping while her eyes turned red. Tears were finally inevitable.

He stepped closer and held out his free hand. Kay took it. She pulled herself up and buried her face in his shoulder as the flood began. It was a loud cry. Will stared at her with a startled expression. William bounced him gently and tried to offer a reassuring smile.

Kay continued to cry and Will continued to look at her as though she'd turned into an alien. William held them both, one hand jiggling the baby and the other patting Kay's back. They'd all make it if he only had to stand there to be supportive. If anyone was looking for words of comfort or wisdom, well, that might be the end of his composure, too.

Then Pete joined in with a sudden and heartfelt wail. Rather than compounding the situation, his cry jolted Kay into action. She pushed away from William with a deliberately calming breath. She grabbed a few tissues and wiped her face. The tissues stayed crumpled in her hand as she picked up Pete again.

"Back to business," she said. Her chin jutted out stubbornly as though she'd let herself be distracted by something trivial. "So we need..." Kay's voice trailed off as she seemed to be making a mental list. She glanced at William uncertainly before her eyes cleared with the arrival of a new thought. "You still have the car seats in your car, don't you?" she asked.

He nodded.

"We don't have time to..."

"I'm coming with you anyway. I'll drive."

Kay asked him to go ahead and get Will buckled so William took the little guy out to his car and put him in the back seat. Pulling the straps in place, he realized how loose they were. Had he driven to the hospital and back without noticing the baby wasn't properly restrained? How had he been so stupid? William palmed his face, which made Will giggle. William smiled back and went to work securing the straps, trying to push aside the guilt over what couldn't be changed. He simply said a quiet prayer that Will hadn't been harmed and that Kay hadn't noticed his incompetent help.

She appeared on the stairs with Pete and a diaper bag, then disappeared into her apartment again. She didn't come all the way out before she went back inside with the door open behind her. Finally, she came out and locked the door. She hurried down the stairs. William realized too late that she didn't have a free hand to open the car door. She shifted the diaper bag up to her shoulder to open the door before he made it to her side of the car.

He jogged back around to start the car and the air conditioning. Summer was waning, but it was still summer.

They walked into church as the opening hymn ended, which was actually not as late as William thought they would be. Both babies were awake when they sat down, an open pew in the second to last row. Everything went well for a good ten minutes. Then Pete started to get fussy. Kay reached into the diaper bag and pulled out a bottle of water and a bottle of powdered formula. It would be a lot easier for her to mix them with both hands free.

William had one arm around Will as he knelt on the pew next to him. He took Pete with his free hand while Kay prepared a bottle. When she was ready, she tried to take Pete back. But Will had climbed nearly on top of him trying to get on William's lap. Kay set the bottle between them and grabbed Will so William could offer Pete the bottle. Will found an interesting button on the front of Kay's dress, and there was another minute of peace.

But hunger didn't seem to be Pete's problem. He had barely begun sucking on the bottle when he arched his back and turned away from it. He appeared to be working himself up to a very impressive volume. William stood quickly to make his way out of the sanctuary. When Will realized that William was leaving, he shrieked to go after him.

The four of them ended up sitting in the gathering space listening to the mass over speakers that might have been installed for such a situation. Both babies fell asleep shortly before the congregation began to file past them. William was thinking that he could go for a nap, too. He wasn't in a hurry to stand up or to leave.

He heard Kay sigh heavily next to him before she said, "I have two babies now."

There was something disbelieving in her tone that went beyond the moment. William had been curious about her plan, whether or not she intended to keep the babies. He didn't want to ask if she wasn't ready to think about it. Just because she said it didn't mean she was ready to think about it. He still didn't ask. He only turned to her and waited to see if she had more to say.

"Beth asked me... Several months ago, when she was pregnant with Pete, she said she and Rob needed to make a will and would it be okay if they listed me as the guardian for their children? Of course I said yes. I was flattered. I had this beautiful picture in my head where I got married and asked Beth the same thing and we raised our kids together knowing that we were each other's backup plan."

Kay started crying again as she spoke. It was a calmer cry, tears dripped down her face as though she didn't even notice them. "It wasn't supposed to be like this. I don't know what to do now. I mean, I can't go to work tomorrow. I don't know when I can go to work, but I can't just quit because obviously I need money so I guess I need to figure out some sort of day care situation but I don't know how to do that or if... I don't even..."

"Excuse me, are you okay, honey?" An older woman, probably at least seventy, had apparently noticed Kay's distress and stopped in front of her.

Kay nodded and hastily wiped the back of her hand over her face.

The woman opened her mouth. Her eyes flickered between Kay and William as she thought about what to say.

William felt Kay shrink against him. She hated small talk under normal circumstances. "Thank you for your concern," he said. "There's nothing you can do though. She, uh, she recently lost her sister."

"I'm so sorry." The older woman put her hand over her heart. "What was her name?"

"Beth." Kay barely whispered the name.

The woman had sharp ears. She nodded and said, "I'll add Beth and your family to my prayer list." Her eyes washed over the two adults and two sleeping babies and took them as a family.

Kay said, "Thank you," to the woman's back as she moved away. Then she finished drying her face as she cast a wary eye to the other stragglers, those who stopped to talk on their way out of the church. Though she moved slowly to avoid waking Pete, her intent to leave was clear as she gathered her things.

Will's eyes flickered open when William shifted to get to his feet. He didn't fully wake though. He stayed limp and breathed heavily. William followed Kay from the building and was reminded of when he used to follow her out of work for a chance to talk to her.

They'd both started working at Timmond's right out of college. That had been a year later for Kay so William was fairly settled there when Kay became the new girl. She was there only a few days when some coworkers started talking about how odd it was that she refused invitations to join the others in the back room during breaks. William preferred a few quiet minutes at his desk to listening to inane chatter, but chose the former only occasionally to avoid being labeled the weirdo loner. He admired Kay for having the guts to be by herself.

Kay shared an office with William and two other women. The others quickly began sharing smirks whenever Kay was on the phone. They'd noticed that she seemed to draw in a steadying breath before each call. They thought it was funny that she thought talking to customers was difficult. William never laughed because what he'd noticed was that she thought it was difficult and did it anyway. How could that not get his attention?

Of course her looks hadn't hurt. The long brown hair got his attention. The shy smile got his attention. The way she walked got his attention. The office generally cleared out at five o'clock on the dot so timing his exit to coincide with hers was not much of a challenge. The challenge was getting her to share more than a few words before she reached her car. But they were some of his favorite words of the day.

William eventually worked up the courage to ask for some real time together. It's possible there had been a picture in the back of his mind of the two of them someday taking kids to church. The current situation was nothing like that picture. Kay buckled Pete before she climbed into the front seat with a stoic look on her face. William couldn't tell if she was lost in thought or simply trying not to think about anything.

He started the car and just sat there. He wasn't sure if he should take her straight home or if she'd want to stop somewhere first. He'd gotten maybe an hour of sleep so his brain wasn't fully functional and his tongue was tied by a fear that anything he said might make her start crying again.

"So if you were me..." Kay stopped, wrinkled her face in thought and then started again. "I can't decide how to tell Matt. I'm not sure even this situation justifies bothering my boss at home, but I hate to blindside him first thing in the morning with the news that I'm not coming in for... well, probably a few weeks if he'll let me. What would you do if you were me?"

"Let me think." William considered both what he would do and what he thought would make Kay most comfortable. He knew that part of her just didn't want to have a conversation with her boss about her personal life. "I guess I'd send him an email today to explain the situation and give him a heads-up that you'll call in the morning to discuss details. That way you don't have to say what happened out loud and maybe he'll... you can both go straight to time off and practical stuff."

Kay nodded. She didn't look remotely comfortable with the thought.

"So, uh..." William glanced at the back seat. Both car seats faced the back so he couldn't see either baby with their seats in the way. He wondered how long they would stay quiet. "Do we need anything before I take you home?"

Kay closed her eyes as though fighting off physical pain.

More tears. It was unavoidable and not entirely his fault, but he still felt responsible for saying the wrong thing.

Her eyes opened and they were red but not watery. "I hate this," she said. "I hate this so much, but I think we have to go to my sister's house."

William felt his eyes widen. He hadn't expected that at all.

Kay reacted defensively. "The boys need things. Their things. Cribs mostly. We can't all sleep on the floor every night and it doesn't make sense to buy new ones when they have cribs at... And they need clothes and more bottles and Will's high chair and... I have to do what's best for them even though it's hard. Maybe having their own things will make my place more comfortable for them. More familiar."

William nodded along with everything she said. She hadn't gotten that much more sleep than he had and was likely still in shock over the loss, yet she was thinking far more rationally than he was. She really was amazing. "You're right," he said. "Do you have a key?"

"Yeah. I've never used it. Beth just gave it to me to hold in case she ever locked herself out, but... I think I... let's just go."

William put the car in drive and followed Kay's directions. He'd talked to Beth and Rob a few times but didn't know them well. It felt incredibly intrusive to walk into their house. He was sure, however, that his unease was nothing compared to what Kay must be feeling.

"How can I help?" he asked. He was ready to do anything to get this over with.

Kay looked around as though she expected someone to come around a corner and startle her. Her breathing sounded erratic. "Can you keep an eye on the boys while I gather things?"

"Okay."

She gently placed Pete on the living room carpet. He immediately started crying. She walked away without a look back. William felt that she either trusted him to handle it or was as determined as he was to do this task quickly. Even with the fussy baby, he knew he'd been given the easier share.

Kay walked in and out several times with pieces of a crib she'd dismantled. She stacked the parts against the wall, enough for two cribs. Then she set a big box of baby clothes next to them. Then William realized that they had a huge problem. His car wasn't nearly huge enough to hold all the things they needed to move.

He searched his tired brain for people he knew with trucks. He worked with a guy who had a pickup. Chris was pretty easygoing. He'd probably let them borrow the truck, or drive a load for them. And William even had his number. He pulled out his phone. Luckily, the babies were fascinated by the glowing screen and stared quietly at it while he talked.

Kay returned to the room while he was explaining the dilemma to Chris. She had a grocery bag in each hand and baby blankets draped over her shoulder. She put everything down slowly as she listened. Then a look of utter incredulity washed over her face. She, too, was kicking herself for not realizing sooner that cribs wouldn't fit in his trunk. She stood there and waited for him to finish the call.

It seemed likely that Kay figured out the plan from his side of the conversation. William explained anyway. "That was Chris, from work. He's happy to help, but he has some errands to run himself. He's going to come over here to swap vehicles, then he'll meet us at your place in an hour or so."

Kay tipped her head to the side as though waiting for more.

William watched her hair swing out from behind her back. Why was she looking like she was expecting something else? Chris would bring the truck. They'd load up the stuff. It wouldn't take an hour to... Oh. He palmed his face again. Even when he thought he was helping, he wasn't helping. "We can't take the babies in the truck."

Kay nodded at him. She didn't appear frustrated that he'd bungled the plan. She just stood there waiting to hear how he was going to fix it.

"All right. I guess one of us needs to go ahead and drive the truckload to your apartment. I hope you'll let me do that so you don't have to lug all that up the stairs." She was wearing a dress. Surely she'd see it made sense for him to do the physical part. "That won't take an hour so I'll meet Chris back here and we'll all take my car back to organize your place as soon as he returns it."

"Here." She took a few steps and reached into the diaper bag. "Take my keys now so I don't forget to give them to you."

William took the keys with what sounded like permission to do the heavy lifting. Somehow, he still felt that no matter what he did, he was giving Kay the more difficult job. After he explained his mistake to Chris, who stuck around long enough to help him load the truck, he left Kay at her sister's house with two fussy babies and what might be a million painful memories.

He left everything inside the door of her apartment rather than guess where she wanted it. Though William wanted to rush back, he stopped at a fast food place for some burgers. Kay hadn't eaten yet that day and he was hungry, too. They'd just finished eating when Chris returned to reclaim his truck. Kay was ready to leave. William helped her get the babies in his car as soon as he had his keys.

But then she ran back up to the house, leaving him wondering what they forgot. She was inside for several minutes so he started up the car to keep it cool inside for the little ones. He stood waiting on the passenger side, making faces at the boys through the window. They rewarded his efforts with big smiles.

Kay didn't appear to be carrying anything when she arrived at the car. He didn't intend to pry, figuring she just wanted a minute alone. But she explained anyway. She pulled a small necklace from her pocket. It had half of a heart dangling from the chain. "Beth and I have had these since we were little. They're kind of juvenile so neither of us wears them anymore, but I wanted to put Beth's with mine. I don't know why. I just know that... that I don't ever want to come back here." Her voice broke and she could barely get out the last few words before her head fell onto his shoulder. Her arms hung loose while she just leaned on him and cried.

William tentatively put one arm around her to pat her back. His fingers stroked her silky hair. He reached around with the other hand and gently pulled her closer. He hated how insufficient his support felt. And he hated himself for thinking it felt wonderful to hold her when she was hurting so much.

"Your dad will be here in just a few hours," he said.

It didn't seem to help. Her head barely moved in response.

"You'll get through this. I don't know how, but I know you will."

Her head moved a little more. He wasn't sure if she was nodding or drying tears on his shirt. She really did feel good in his arms. He didn't know how he was going to get through it either.

4

The arrival of Kay's dad, Patrick Donovan, lifted a bit of her stress. She stopped worrying about questions she couldn't answer as he took charge of answering them. He worked with Rob's parents to make funeral arrangements and hired a lawyer to address guardianship and estate issues. He emptied their house and got it on the market, though a lot of its contents were simply put into storage to deal with later.

Kay's new life was pretty well organized by the time he returned to Seattle. While she appreciated his help and would certainly miss him, she also felt a little relieved when he left. He seemed to be channeling all his own grief into anger and spent much of his two-week visit yelling at people to get things done.

He took the constant tension home with him. He also took Sherry with him, his wife. Sherry was technically Kay's stepmom, but she never thought of her that way. It wasn't that she wouldn't think of her like that. She had just never known Sherry in a motherly role. Kay and Beth's mom died when they were in college. Kay was in her first year and Beth in her third. Their dad married Sherry a year later, at which point they were already planning the move to Seattle. They'd been married more than four years now, but the distance kept Kay from getting to know Sherry in any role.

Her dad had booked an early flight on a Tuesday. The hotel was near the airport so Kay had an awkward goodbye with Sherry Monday night, then a goodbye with her dad that started sweet and turned even more awkward. He apologized for being cranky, broke down in tears, then turned and punched the doorway on his way out. Kay closed her apartment door with a complete lack of emotion. Her heart was demanding a break. There was nothing safe enough to feel.

She went through the motions of getting the boys ready for bed. She'd gotten surprisingly good at juggling them in the two weeks they'd been living with her. There wasn't even a hint of satisfaction as she thought about her progress. She cradled Pete in one arm while she helped Will into his pajamas. She asked him to lie on his back so she could hold down the toe of the footies with her knee and zip them one-handed.

She checked Pete's diaper. They'd both been changed recently and still seemed dry. "Okay." She tried to reward Will for his cooperation with a bright smile. It didn't feel bright on the inside. He smiled back though. "Let's go to the bedroom."

Will stood up. He'd taken a few steps during the last week and she thought he might try again. After a few seconds, he dropped to all fours and crawled, presumably because it was faster, into the bedroom. Kay followed him. She had a double bed, which was pushed into a corner of the room. Two cribs were lined up against the wall by the foot of her bed, and there was just enough space to walk between them. Or crawl. Will used the leg of his crib to pull himself up and stood waiting. He already knew Pete would get tucked in first.

Kay swayed on the spot for a moment before she placed Pete on his blanket, then wrapped him up nice and snug like a baby burrito. Then she leaned over to pick up Will, who stretched his arms towards her as she reached for him. She held him close as he snuggled his head against her shoulder. She wondered briefly if she reminded him of his mom or if he'd already forgotten Beth.

She closed her eyes, patted his back, and began to sing. When Kay tried to establish a bedtime routine, she didn't know if it would be better to sing a lullaby or say a prayer. She wanted to teach them to say a nighttime prayer, but they were a little young for that. On the other hand, she didn't know any lullabies. She settled on singing the Our Father to them. She sang slowly and softly, placing Will on his back in the crib as a long amen fell from her lips.

He quickly flipped over and stuck his tiny butt up in the air, his preferred sleeping position. Kay stepped to the side and checked on Pete. Sometimes she had to sway longer and put him down several times before he was ready to go to sleep. His little eyelids floated up and down though. He looked ready. She watched until they stayed closed.

Then she got herself ready for bed and tucked herself in. It was not a restful night. Pete woke her up five times instead of the typical two or three. Will had been sleeping through the night but was an early riser, generally wanting out of the crib close to 6 am. She thought Pete was fussing again when the clock said 4:22. It was Will. He seemed wide awake and under the impression that 4:30 now qualified as morning.

That weird numbness was still clinging to Kay, and she didn't even feel annoyed with Will for getting her up so early. She simply scooped him out of his crib so he wouldn't wake Pete.

Pete joined them before long anyway. Kay muddled her way through another day. Maybe because of the early start and maybe because she was just really lucky that they napped at the same time, Kay was able to get a shower before noon.

The freeze on her emotions began to thaw as 5 o'clock approached. She was giving Pete a bottle while she rolled a ball around on the floor with Will. "Do you think William is going to stop by today?"

Will mostly ignored the question as he chased the ball, but there was a hint of recognition on his face. Did he hear the difference between Will and William or did he just think she was talking to him? "It's Tuesday though," Kay said, mostly thinking out loud. "He always has dinner with his sister's family on Tuesdays."

William lived only a half mile from Kay, and her apartment was on his way home from work. Since he helped her move the baby stuff, he'd made a habit of stopping every day when he passed, checking in to see if she needed anything. He'd stayed only a few minutes whenever her dad and Sherry were there. And today he'd have only a few minutes before going to Annie's house. In fact, Kay's apartment was not on the way if he was going directly to Annie's house after work. Hope shifted to disappointment. "We might not see William at all today."

Will gave an unexpected squeal of pleasure as the ball slipped from his fingers and bopped against a wall.

Kay laughed at his amusement. "I guess we can have fun without him," she said. "And if he comes tomorrow, maybe we can talk him into staying for dinner. I think he likes to be fed about as much as the two of you."

When the bottle emptied, Kay switched Pete's position to try to pat a burp out of him. She'd talked herself out of expecting William so she was startled when the doorbell rang. Will crawled to the front door before she could even get to her feet. Of course, he didn't have far to go.

"Hi." William greeted her with a smile while his eyes flickered gingerly over Kay and the babies.

She understood his caution. Showing up at her place had been a rather unpredictable mess lately. Once she'd opened the door crying. Once she'd handed him a smelly baby before he even said hi, before _she_ even said hi. Once her dad answered the door yelling about inconsiderate salesmen before he recognized William. It was something like a miracle that he kept coming back.

"I thought I was making myself pretty predictable," William said. "You almost look as though you've never seen me before."

Kay felt oddly flustered as she backed up to let him in. How had William ended up as such a good friend to her when their relationship began with an awful date? She wasn't about to ask him that. "I just... um, it's Tuesday. Aren't you going to Annie's for dinner?"

"Yeah. As a matter of fact, that's one of the reasons I'm here. Hi, kiddo." He lifted Will into his arms as he spoke because the baby was reaching for him.

"This isn't on the way. How is it one of the reasons you're here?"

"Uh... well... Annie sort of invited you and the babies to dinner, too."

"Oh." Kay had stood and chatted with Annie after church several times. That didn't qualify as knowing Annie. She didn't have the energy for tense socializing. "I don't think I'm up for being around people tonight. It was nice of her though."

William opened his mouth and stuck his tongue out at Will, which made the baby giggle, before he addressed Kay again. "So... uh, maybe invited isn't exactly the right word."

"She didn't invite me?" Embarrassment heated Kay's face for refusing an offer she hadn't actually received. She should have asked him to clarify instead of assuming that sort of invited was the same as invited.

William was a little distracted by Will trying to grab his face, but there was clearly something else making him uncomfortable. Finally, he said, "It was more a threat than an invitation. She told me that I had to bring... had to figure out a way to convince you to come because if I showed up without you she would refuse to feed me."

No wonder he looked uncomfortable. He knew she wouldn't want to come, but if she didn't he would suffer for it. Maybe. Kay didn't know Annie nearly well enough to know if the threat would have follow-through.

"Please," William said. His eyes chased the word with a plaintive look.

"Why does your sister even want a stranger and two babies as dinner guests?" Pete echoed her question with a loud burp, as though trying to prove her argument. He was so little that everything he did was impossibly cute though. She wasn't sure if it proved anything.

"Annie loves babies. She also thinks you need support and that I am apparently chopped liver. I think she has this idea that she's going to become your mentor or something." William squinted doubtfully at her as he paused. He seemed to realize he wasn't convincing Kay to come with him and was thinking of what else to say. It appeared he was going to be pushy, which wasn't like him.

She guessed that meant he was expecting follow-through.

"She'll want to hold Pete a lot," William said. "That'll give your arms a break. And she's a pretty good cook."

Kay felt her refusal evaporating. She knew she didn't have the energy to spend an evening coming up with chitchat. She just wasn't sure she had the energy to keep shooting down William's offer either. He could have run away when her world turned upside-down. But he jumped right into the somersault with her. It took a lot of strength to disappoint him, especially when she was a little confused by the way he sounded as though he was trying to do yet another favor at the same time. "Okay," she said on a sigh.

"Okay? You're... coming?"

"Let me grab a few things." She turned to check her diaper bag. Pete had just eaten, but it wasn't smart to leave home with no formula. And she'd need at least one dry rag for whatever didn't stay in his stomach. Plus diapers. It wasn't called a diaper bag for nothing.

They took separate cars, which Kay said was so he could go straight home afterwards. It was really so she could leave without him if he seemed to want to stay longer than she did. Of course, she knew he knew the real reason. There was an odd satisfaction that came with knowing she didn't fool him.

Annie and her husband Jake lived on a weird little dead-end street lined with houses and surrounded by farmland. They had a large yard with a swing set and various outdoor toys strewn about. Kay pulled into the driveway behind William, who made it to the back of her car the same time she did. He unbuckled Will while she grabbed the diaper bag and Pete's carrier. She walked slowly to let William reach the door first.

"Hey! Come on in." Jake answered the door and opened it wide. "So this must be Will," he said as William entered.

Will stared at Jake and his grip on William's shirt tightened.

Kay followed them inside far enough to let Jake close the door.

Annie came rushing towards her with her arms out like she was going to hug her but dropped her arms at the last moment and said, "I'm so glad you came. How are you feeling today?"

"Um... better." That was probably the best simple answer Kay could give. She wasn't fine. She was a long way from fine. But that day at least, she didn't feel as though she was being crushed by sorrow and that was better than a lot of recent days.

Annie nodded and looked into the baby carrier. "Pete, right?"

"Yeah."

"I want to hold him so bad. Do you think he'll let me? Will you let me?"

"I'll get him out," Kay said. It was plain that Annie wasn't exaggerating. Her desire to hold the baby radiated off her. Kay undid his straps and passed him to Annie, then shoved the carrier and diaper bag into a corner.

Annie beamed down at Pete while her girls gathered around her oohing and ahhing and asking to see him better. She squatted to show off the baby.

Kay felt vulnerable without a baby to draw attention away from her. Jake was looking at her as though thinking of something to say. Kay swallowed and tried to dive into small talk. "How old are your girls again?" she asked.

"Bailey is seven." He pointed at the tallest girl. She had skinny legs sticking out of her shorts and light brown hair in a messy ponytail. "Then Ariana is five and Taylor is two." The middle child had thin but wavy hair nearly to her waist and the youngest smiled sweetly when she heard her name.

"So... Ariana just started kindergarten?" Kay asked.

Jake nodded. "This is her second week."

"Can I hold him?"

"No, I want to!"

"I get to hold him first!"

The older girls had started fighting for a turn with Pete, and Annie looked up from the growing chaos. "Do you mind if I sit them on the couch to hold him for a bit?"

Kay shook her head. Annie had a lot more experience with babies than she did. It wouldn't make any sense to second guess her judgment. She followed Pete and his new fan club into the next room where Annie lined the girls up on a couch to pass the baby between them. He started fussing during Ariana's turn and Taylor scrambled off the couch. She had no interest in being near someone making so much noise. Annie scooped Pete into her arms and calmly shushed him.

"Come with me into the kitchen," Annie said to Kay. "I think dinner's almost ready and I'm going to have to give him back in order to get the casserole out of the oven."

Kay trailed after her with a look over her shoulder at William. He was still standing by the front door with Jake talking about something sports related.

Though he'd seemed engrossed and didn't look her way as she left the room, William stepped into the kitchen only a minute after Kay. "What's cooking, Annie?" he asked.

"Dinner," was her curt response.

William made a frustrated face, but it was exaggerated and clearly intended only to amuse Will.

Annie picked up on the fake annoyance and rewarded him with more information. "It's a macaroni casserole, with beans and tomatoes. Plenty of cheese."

"Smells good."

"I'm afraid it's done," Annie said. "That means I have to give you up for a while." She was talking to Pete, whom she passed to Kay before opening the oven.

Annie pulled her husband into the kitchen to help insert a leaf in the table, then grabbed a high chair from a corner and pulled it closer. They'd just gotten a booster for their youngest so Will ate in the high chair. Kay held one baby during the meal while William fed the other. The food was good, and someone else had cooked. Kay was actually fairly relaxed. Then the questions began.

"How long are you able to be off work?" Jake asked.

"I'm not exactly sure." Kay took a breath and tried to explain without too much detail. "Matt... uh, my boss said I could have twelve weeks family leave. But it's unpaid. I'm using up my two weeks of vacation first and I don't know if I'm going back twelve weeks after the two weeks or including the two weeks because I'm not sure my savings will last that long. I think it will. But I've never budgeted for diapers and formula before. Matt's expecting to hear from me halfway through or so... probably early October, to establish a restart date." She stuffed a forkful in her mouth to shut herself up. That had been too much detail. She babbled when she was nervous.

Jake was nodding as though his question had been answered though. Mostly. "Forgive me if I'm prying, but your sister didn't have insurance?"

Kay shook her head while she forced the food down her throat. "My dad is taking care of all the estate stuff, but it doesn't... He said they had no insurance and were upside-down on their mortgage and... I'm not expecting anything there."

"But you found someone to watch the boys while you're at work?" Annie asked.

"Sherry has a niece... Sherry is, uh... sort of my... she's my dad's wife. And she has a niece in the area who runs a day care from her home. One of the kids she was watching just started kindergarten."

"I'm in kindergarten," Ariana said, her eyes glowing with pride.

"Yes, you are." Jake nodded at his daughter.

Kay felt attention shift back to her. It seemed she was expected to say more. "Anyway, since they no longer need full time care, that kid's parents aren't going to use her anymore and Sherry's niece said she could fit both Pete and Will. She's holding the spot until I need it."

"Does she live near you?" Annie was looking at Pete, but Kay could tell she wasn't asking him.

"Closer to work," she said.

"Good." Annie looked up at Kay. "It sounds like the practical things are falling into place. We'll be able to help with other things, advice and social support. We're really glad you agreed to start joining us every week."

"Oh, yeah," Jake said. "Annie needs this weekly baby fix so she doesn't start thinking we need another one." He shot his wife a playful wink.

She waved it away. "We're doing it for Kay. Trust me," she said, locking eyes on Kay, "there will be times you'll be looking forward to Tuesday just to talk to someone who talks back so you won't think you're going crazy."

Kay nodded stiffly and broke the eye contact to silently ask William why these people were under the impression that she'd made a commitment that extended to all future Tuesdays.

William was asking Will if he wanted more to eat when the baby had plenty of food on his tray. His fake oblivious act telegraphed guilt. The man had a sneaky side. Perhaps he didn't fully deserve the hero status she'd been building up for him in her head. He would pay for this transgression.

