>> YOU KNOW A LOT OF KIDS DON'T REALIZE HOW
DIFFICULT THEIR LIFE IS UNTIL AFTER THEY BECOME
ADULT AND CAN STEP BACK AND SEE.
WHEN I LEFT KANSAS CITY I WENT TO MANHATTAN,
KANSAS.
IT WAS SUCH A DIFFERENT ENVIRONMENT.
YOU KNOW, THE PEOPLE AT MANHATTAN AND K STATE
WERE MOSTLY FRIENDLY, THEY SPOKE TO ME THEY
ASKED ME THING ABOUT MY LIFE AND I WASN'T
I WAS NO LONGER WATCHING MY BACK.
I WASN'T DEFENSIVE ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT I
WAS DOING OR EVERYTHING THAT I SAID AND I
DIDN'T HAVE TO GO AROUND WITH A GROUP OF PEOPLE
WITH ME.
WHEN I CAME BACK TO KANSAS CITY I DIDN'T WANT
TO BE BACK HERE.
I DIDN'T WANT TO BE BACK SURROUNDED BY ALL
THE BAD THINGS THAT WERE HAPPENING.
AS A MATTER OF FACT, I CAME BACK FROM K STATE
ONE CHRISTMAS BREAK AT A PARTY HERE IN KANSAS
CITY WITH SOME OF MY FRIENDS AND RUCUS BROKE
OUT.
AND SOMEBODY PULLED OUT A GUN AND STARTED
FIRING.
EVERYBODY HIT THE FLOOR.
AFTER I HIT THE FLOOR, I IMMEDIATELY STOOD
BACK UP AND BEGAN SHOUTING AT ALL THE PEOPLE
IN THAT ROOM, ASKING WHY AM I BACK IN THIS
CITY?
WHY AM I HERE?
WHAT AM I DOING BACK IN A PLACE WHERE DEATH
IS ALWAYS OCCURRING AND IT'S ALL THESE FIGHTS
AND MY FRIENDS WERE TRYING TO PULL ME DOWN
TO GET DOWN AND TAKE COVER.
AND I WAS SO UPSET AT THE THINGS THAT WERE
OCCURRING IN MY CITY,IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD THAT
I DIDN'T WANT TO COME BACK.
YOU KNOW, I WAS WORKING ON MY DEGREE IN GRAPHIC
DESIGN AND I NEEDED A JOB AND I HAD SWORN
I WOULD NEVER COME BACK TO WYANDOTTE COUNTY.
BUT MY STEP FATHER WORKED FOR THE COUNTY AND
HE SAID I COULD GET YOU A JOB.
HE GOT ME A JOB AT THE JUVENILE DETENTION
CENTER.
WHEN I CAME BACK, I WAS NOT THERE FOR MORE
THAN A COUPLE OF WEEKS BEFORE I KNEW I WAS
SUPPOSED TO BE WORKING WITH KIDS.
MY HEART STARTED TO CHANGE FOR THE PEOPLE
WHEN I REALIZED THAT THEIR CIRCUMSTANCES ARE
WHAT PUT THEM IN THIS POSITION.
THE FAMILY DYNAMIC, THE NEIGHBORHOOD, THE
GUNS, THE DRUG, WHATEVER IT IS, MOST OF THOSE
KIDS IN THE JUVENILE DETENTION CENTER HAD
PARENT WHO WERE EITHER UPSTAIRS IN THE COUNTY
JAIL, OR IN ANOTHER PENAL SYSTEM.
STATE PENITENTIARY, FEDERAL PENITENTIARY.
I KNEW IF WE COULD SHOW THEM A DIFFERENT WAY,
THAT THEIR LIVES WOULD BE DIFFERENT.
THAT WAS ANOTHER THING THAT REALLY CHANGED
MY HEART FOR THIS COMMUNITY.
WE HAD EVERYTHING WE NEEDED; WE HAD PARENTS
WHO WOULD TELL ME IF YOU EVER NEED ANYTHING
AND THEY WOULD SAY AND I MEAN ANYTHING YOU
JUST LET US KNOW.
BECAUSE THEY WANTED THEIR STUDENTS TO HAVE
WHATEVER IT TOOK, WHATEVER THEY NEEDED, TO
BE SUCCESSFUL.
AND SO WE HAD TV, PHONE, COLOR PRINTERS, WE
HAD THREE COMPUTER LABS IN THE MIDDLE SCHOOL
WHERE I WAS TEACHING.
AND I DECIDED I'M GOING TO GO BACK TO MY OLD
ELEMENTARY SCHOOL AND SHOW THE TEACHERS WHAT
I HAD BECOME.
BECAUSE GROWING UP IN A FAMILY WITHOUT A FATHER,
AND HAVING PEOPLE TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD BE
DOING AND THEN TELLING THEM YOU'RE NOT MY
AUTHORITY AGAIN, I GOT IN A LOT OF TROUBLE.
I SAID LET ME GO BACK AND SHOW THE TEACHERS.
SO I WALK INTO THE SCHOOL AND THERE IS THE
SMALL, DIMLY LIT HALLWAYS AND I VENTURE THROUGH
THE HALLWAYS TO THE LIBRARY AND SEE THAT THE
LIBRARY IS SMALLER THAN A NORMAL SIZED CLASSROOM
IN THE SCHOOL WHERE I WAS TEACHING.
THERE WERE BOOKS ON THE CART, THERE WAS ART
SUPPLY ON A CART, AND I REALIZED HOW UNEVEN
THE PLAYING FIELD WAS.
I MEAN, THAT IT REALLY HIT ME ABOUT THE DIFFERENCE
IN EDUCATION AND THAT PLAY AD KEY ROLE TO
HELPING ME UNDERSTAND THAT MORE NEEDED TO
BE DONE TO HELP THESE STUDENTS UNDERSTAND
THEY CAN ACHIEVE ON A HIGHER LEVEL BUT THEY
NEED TO HAVE A VISION OF WHAT THAT LOOK LIKE.
>> THERE WAS A PROFESSOR FROM KU THAT FOUND
OUT ABOUT OUR MINISTRY.
SHE INVITED ME TO COME UP TO KU.
SHE HAD HER PHD STUDENTS COME TO THIS MEETING
AND SHE WANTED ME TO PRESENT WHAT WE WERE
DOING AT THE CENTER AND OUR VISION AND BY
THAT TIME IT WAS ALL LAID OUT AND WE TALKED
ABOUT THE ENTREPRENEUR AVENUE, WE TALKED ABOUT
SCHOOLS, WE TALKED ABOUT A CENTER, WHETHER
IT BE LIBRARY, AND ARTS AND ALL THESE THING
AND THE REASON WAS BECAUSE OF THE HOPELESSNESS
THAT WAS IN OUR COMMUNITY.
WE WANTED TO RAISE THIS LEVEL OF HOPE AND
HELP THESE STUDENTS UNDERSTAND THAT THEY COULD
TEACH SCHOOL ON A HIGH LEVEL, THAT THEY HAD
THE ABILITY TO DO THIS.
I SAT AND SPOKE FOR PROBABLY 45 MINUTES TO
THIS GROUP OF PHD STUDENTS ABOUT OUR GOAL,
OUR DREAMS, AND I ENDED AND AS I ENDED MY
PRESENTATION THEY WERE ALL IN SILENCE, JUST
STARING AT ME.
I TURNED TO MY PROFESSOR AND I SAID SO WHICH
ONE IS GOING TO DO THIS.
SHE LOOKED AT ME WITH A CONFUSED LOOK ON HER
FACE AND SAID WELL, YOU ARE.
AND EVEN AT THAT POINT AFTER THE CENTER HAD
STARTED FOR A COUPLE OF YEARS, AND AFTER THE
LORD HAD GIVEN ME THE VISION, I STILL DIDN'T
FEEL LIKE I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS CAPABLE TO
ACHIEVE THIS.
AND IT WENT BACK TO THIS MENTALITY OF POVERTY,
THAT I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE A PHD STUDENT,
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE ON THIS LEVEL WHERE
I CAN ORGANIZE THIS OR DEVELOP THIS.
I THOUGHT SURELY ONE OF YOU REALLY SMART PEOPLE
ARE SUPPOSED TO DO THIS.
AND I LEFT THAT MEETING AND THE LORD SPOKE
TO ME IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE THAT I'VE CALLED
YOU TO DO THIS AND MY POWER TO DO THIS THROUGH
YOU, YOU MIGHT AS WELL GO SOMEWHERE AND DIE.
AND IT WAS AFTER THAT POINT THAT I REALIZED
NOTHING CAN BE ACCOMPLISHED WITHOUT THE POWER
OF GOD.
AS SOON AS AN INDIVIDUAL DETERMINES EXACTLY
HOW IT'S GOING TO BE DONE THE RESOURCES THEN
IT'S ALL IN HIS STRENGTH.
WHEN GOD SAYS I BROUGHT YOU TO THIS POINT
BECAUSE YOU'RE WILLING TO BE USED AND YOU
HAVE TO HAVE FAITH IN MY POWER TO WORK THROUGH
YOU TO ACCOMPLISH THESE THINGS YOU MOVE FORWARD.
