

### Relationship With God:

### Putting It All Together

### By

### Jesus (AJ Miller)

### Sessions 1-2

Published by

Divine Truth, Australia at Smashwords

http://www.divinetruth.com/

Copyright 2015 Divine Truth

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

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### This ebook is a transcript of two seminars by Jesus (AJ Miller) that took place on 10th and 11th August 2013 in Murgon, Queensland, Australia, as part of the Relationship with God series of talks. In these talks Jesus describes the five basics required for progression towards God – love, truth, humility, faith, and will. He discusses the soul condition and soul progression of members of the audience, and how to overcome fear, which is the major impediment to soul growth.

### Reminder From Jesus & Mary

### Jesus and Mary would like to remind you that any document produced by Divine Truth containing any information from Jesus, Mary or any other person includes only a portion of God's Truth that they have personally discovered.

### It does not and cannot contain the entire of God's Truth since God's Truth is infinite and humankind will forever continue to discover more of God's Truth as we progress in receiving more of God's Love.

### Please remember that due to these limitations information contained within this document may need to be revised in the future.

### Many other ebooks have been published by Divine Truth, including ebooks translated into a variety of different languages.

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Table of Contents

### Putting It All Together: Session 1 Part 1

1. Introduction

2. The five basics required for progression towards God

2.1. God's Love is an emotion that comes only from God

2.2. Becoming at-one with the way that God loves

2.3. Becoming at-one with God's Absolute Truth

2.4. Desiring to feel every emotion

2.5. Faith that God is good and loves

2.6. Using will in harmony with God's Laws

3. Soul progression by audience members

3.1. An example of single women in the audience

3.2. Placing fear as our god

3.3. Percentages of the audience who have progressed

4. Truth exposes fear

5. Major areas of avoidance of fear

5.1. Beliefs surrounding relationships

5.2. Beliefs surrounding having a relationship with God and how we treat God's Creations

5.3. Increasing awareness of fear through truth

5.4. Dealing with not wanting to know ourselves

5.4.1. An example of wanting control

5.4.2. An example of single women in the audience (continued)

5.4.3. Feeling how much we don't want to know ourselves

6. Our fear creates a prison of our own making

### Putting It All Together: Session 1 Part 2

7. Developing a desire to feel childhood fear as an adult

7.1. Fear must be felt to grow towards God

7.2. False beliefs surrounding feeling fear

7.2.1. An example of childhood abuse

7.3. Valuing fear blocks the five basics required to grow towards God

7.4. Working through fear with or without God's Assistance

7.5. Our fear is carried with us everywhere

7.6. We must be overwhelmed to grow

8. Common emotional injuries in males in the audience

8.1. The addiction of pleasing women

8.2. Common fears in males in the audience pertaining to women

8.3. Common addictions in the males in the audience that prevent a relationship with God

9. The importance of self-examination of our true soul condition

9.1. The example of single women in the audience (continued)

9.2. Being loving and truthful to others

9.3. Embracing the Divine Truth that we have heard

10. Audience discussion about the feedback

10.1. An example of a participant who blames herself

10.1.1. Blame is a way to avoid emotions

10.2. An example of a participant being afraid to speak up in the workplace

10.3. A lack of humility in audience members

11. God created our souls in a pristine state

11.1. An analogy of having mud on our body

11.2. Emotional injuries enter our soul but are not our pristine self

11.3. Only we can control the state of our soul through the use of our will

12. Closing words

12.1. Spirit influence towards audience members

12.2. Trusting God

12.3. AJ explains his motivation for the feedback

### Putting It All Together: Session 2 Part 1

13. Introduction

14. An example of a participant not desiring truth

14.1. God's Law of Attraction constantly brings us truth

14.1.1. An example of AJ's passionfruit vine being eaten

14.1.2. An example of Mary hurting herself when cooking

14.2. Tying the five basics required for progression towards God with the Law of Attraction

14.2.1. An example of a woman who falsely declared an insurance claim

14.2.2. Embracing the Law of Attraction

14.3. The Law of Cause and Effect shows us truth about our life

14.3.1. An example of Mary ordering food in restaurants

14.3.2. Focusing on the cause rather than the effect

14.3.3. An example of plants being damaged by frost and animals

14.3.4. An example of feeling love from audience members

14.3.5. Focusing on the cause rather than the effect (continued)

14.3.6. An example of AJ's fruit trees

14.3.7. An example of birds attacking AJ and Mary's house

15. An example of participants who are terrified of spirits

15.1. The negative physical impact of fear

15.2. Fear causes us to blame others and not love

15.3. Recognising anger as an avoidance of fear

16. An example of a participant who was feeling angry but is now afraid

16.1. Anger covers addictions and fear

16.2. The five basics required for progression towards God in the context of anger, addictions and fear

16.2.1. Feeding our addictions is unloving and damaging

16.3. Progressing from feeling anger and living in addictions to feeling fear

16.4. Fear blocks the absorption of truth into the soul

16.5. An example of AJ overcoming the fear of being himself in public

16.6. Staying open to fear by focusing on love, truth, humility, faith and will

16.6.1. AJ's experience of releasing fear

### Putting It All Together: Session 2 Part 2

17. The importance of focusing on fear

18. An example of a participant who uses many strategies to avoid fear

18.1. Self-pity, avoidance and commiseration

18.2. Self-punishment and fear of violence

18.3. Spirit influence and fear of external judgement

18.4. Addictions

18.5. Placing love, truth, humility, faith and will above fear

18.6. Problems with seeking advice from others who have not worked through the same issue themselves

18.7. Working through issues by examining what occurred when the issue started

19. An example of a participant who had a relationship with an over-cloaked woman

19.1. Addictions in the participant that were met by the spirit

19.2. Tying in the five basics required for progression towards God with the addictions driving the relationship

19.3. Issues of self-love make us suggestible to poor advice

19.4. Problems with seeking advice from others who have not worked through the same issue themselves (continued)

19.4.1. Receiving truth from God through God's Laws

20. Closing words

Putting It All Together: Session 1 Part 1

1. Introduction

How are you today? Good? I'm not very good, not many people want to hear the truth. Welcome today. How many of you is this your first time? Just a few of you. And how many of you have only listened for the last six months or so on YouTube? Most of what I say today will not apply to you, so you're off the hook! (Laughter) When I say it won't apply to you, when I'm talking about the people in the audience, or the percentages of people who are doing this or that you're not included in that because obviously you've just heard the Divine Truth. We would like to welcome you along.

So what I would like to discuss with you today is this subject that is part of the Relationship with God series of talks, and I want to call it "Putting It All Together" and this will be session 1.

Now I want to say at the start of this discussion that many of you are going to walk away today and feel really upset. Some of you will want to be angry with me as a result of today's discussion. The reason why is I'm going to be very blunt with you as a group, particularly the group of people who have been listening for years now. I particularly want to be blunt with you because I feel that many of you are avoiding deep issues of truth in your personal life. And this is what is causing many of your current problems. So I want to discuss with you the reasons why these things are happening and what is really going on.

To do that we want to look at how to put your relationship with God all together and then actually dissect where we are not doing it, to be honest about where we are not doing that, because if we are not honest about that, then of course you'll spend another five years listening without really making any changes. And during that period of time you'll have a lot more spirit influence on you to conform to their way of life and their way of thinking and so forth, you'll have a lot of pressure from Earth and you'll feel very unhappy. And the reason why many of you actually have felt quite unhappy is because of this already. And the more you delay your own progression, the more unhappy you become in fact. And so what I want to do is frankly discuss with you what's going on.

2. The five basics required for progression towards God

To do that I want to remind you of the five basic things you need for progression towards God. What are they? Let's start with the most important one - what's that? A desire to love isn't it, really? Love. Would you put truth or humility as the next more important thing? I think I'd put truth myself - and here we're talking about God's Truth, not your own - because to me, it's only God's Truth that will set you free. It's impossible to be set free by your own truth. You can only be set free through actually coming to experience and feel God's Truth. So that's the next important thing.

Obviously as many of you have pointed out, humility is so important in that process, and remember what the definition of humility is? In particular can you remember that it was the definition regarding emotion that we need to focus on? The willingness to feel every single thing you feel as it really is whether it feels good or bad. That is a part of humility but not the only parts of humility. Mary and I have done a five series interview called "Interview with Jesus - Humility", which is available on the Internet, about all of the different parts of humility. I would advise many of you to have a look at that again, if you haven't had a look at it already. What would you say are the next two most important things that you need for your relationship with God? Faith and will. So these are the things we discussed with you last time, in "Relationship with God - Faith & Prayer Session 4".

Now many of you have a false concept of your own condition. For a few of you the false concept is that you think your condition is worse than it actually is. But for the majority of us we actually think our condition is better than it actually is. Now what I would like to do is be honest about your condition because if you are not honest about your own condition of love, how is it that you'll ever develop a true desire to change? You need to know where you are before you can know where you're aiming. But also you need to know where you're aiming before you'll take any action.

So if we look at this issue of love, what are we aiming for? If we're on the Divine Love Path, if we're following this pathway that God has made to become at-one with God, what are we aiming for? It's quite obvious, isn't it? We're aiming for becoming at-one with God in love. What we're aiming for is becoming at-one with the way God loves.

2.1. God's Love is an emotion that comes only from God

**Participant** : I touched on your stuff about three years ago, the emanation - is that what you're talking about? So that we're emanating God's Love, so the energy that God is providing to the universe comes through us?

No it's not about the energy God's providing. So remember for most of the people here they would know that God actually provides lots of different forms of energy and love is one of those forms. And what I'm talking about here is in particular the feeling of love. God has feelings of love for all of God's Creations, including yourself, and that feeling of love can enter you and transform your soul to such an extent that you feel the way God loves, and you actually finish up loving the way God loves, with other people. But that's not energy, if you understand. [[00:26:29.09]

**Participant** : It is a form of energy though.

It's a form of energy but if you focus it as energy what you're going to finish up doing every single time is going away from that it's a feeling of love. So most people find what they do is they talk about energy a lot but they forget that it's emotional - love is an emotion, it's not just energy; it's a feeling in motion. It's an emotion. So what I'm suggesting to people is don't get stuck on the energy side of things, focus on the feeling side of things because that's the emotions, that's the energy in motion.

**Participant** : It's still an energy though and it's God's Energy and it's emanating...

To be honest with you, if you've come here to argue with me...

**Participant** : No, no, no, I'm putting a point of view forward that might be different to yours.

And to be frank with you, this is my seminar and my points of view will come forward.

**Participant** : So shall I hold these to the break to be able to talk to...?

No, you can ask tomorrow. We'll have a whole question and answer session tomorrow where you can ask questions. Today I want to focus on the material I want to cover. It's a free seminar that I've paid for to share my opinion with you. And I'm telling you that's it's not my opinion actually, it's God's, but that's up to you whether you want to determine that or not. But, as I've spoken to many people before about, if you focus on the thought of energy, you are always going to get away from the real feelings of love. Energy is very, very different because there's all forms of energy, including your entire body, is a form of energy. But that's not necessarily love. [00:28:06.05]

**Participant** : So I can't say anything more until tomorrow?

You can ask questions tomorrow, if you want to ask questions about different subjects that get me off this subject that I want to discuss because you want to speak about your ideas about energy. I don't want to speak about your ideas about energy.

**Participant** : I'm just trying to have a conversation, that's all. But I'll leave it till tomorrow.

And I'm not here to have a conversation with you today.

**Participant** : I'll leave it till tomorrow.

Yep that's fine.

**Participant** : That's fine. I apologise if that's caused some disturbance.

No, no, it doesn't disturb me; I'm just saying I'm not going to do it with you. That's all. Anyone else have a question?

2.2. Becoming at-one with the way that God loves

Getting back to the five basics, this area of love is becoming at-one with the way God loves, the way God feels for everything, everything God has created. So it means becoming at-one with that. So in other words you will love in the same manner and way that God will love when you become at-one with God. That's the underlying goal. Now to do that, that means that you would love every single person here the way God loves. Now for the majority of us here, we don't want to do that. Not yet. You see there are certain people that you want to dislike. There are certain people you want to attack. There are certain people that you'd like to pull down. There are certain people that you'd like to just have a few cross words with and make them feel like they're the problem basically. That's what you want to achieve many times.

And becoming at-one with God is not about that, becoming at-one with God is about becoming at-one with the way in which God loves. Now for many of us, it gets to the point where we feel that the way God loves is not achievable. And for many of us we don't even believe God loves actually. For many of us what happens is that we believe that God's quite cruel or God doesn't engage us on a personal one-on-one level; that's what we believe. As a result of that, we are not at-one with the way God loves and we have no desire to be at-one with the way God loves. And it's only the desire to be at-one with the way God loves that causes us to want to be at-one with God. It's only the desire for the relationship with God that causes us to have that feeling that we would like to achieve that in our lifetime.

2.3. Becoming at-one with God's Absolute Truth

Now to do that we have to believe what God knows is the absolute truth. So our belief systems have to change. We must become at-one with God's Absolute Truth. This is where many of us have a terrible, terrible lack. We have little desire to become at-one with the way God sees ourselves. We want God to see us how we see ourselves. We don't want God to see us the way God actually does see us. We want to maintain a facade with the world in other words. And in maintaining a facade with the world, what we're doing is we are not being at-one with the way that God sees everything. We are trying to falsify ourselves to the universe around us. And most of the time we're even falsifying ourselves to ourselves. We're telling ourselves that we're actually more developed or more loving than we actually are. We're telling ourselves we're more truthful than we are.

What I notice a lot is the amount of resistance to truth. It is extreme for many of you still. When Mary and I go shopping in Kingaroy, which is where we shop, sometimes we come against some of you that we see from the audience. And we go to walk up to you and have a chat with you and then we go, "Whoa, that feeling coming from you," and that feeling is that feeling that you have of, "What's he going to say to me now?" Many of you know you've had that feeling. "What's he going to say to me now? What thing is he going to say that makes me feel like I'm... no I don't want to know." And what we feel from you is this wall of not engaging, not wanting to engage. Now of course we want to start to want to engage and we go, no that wall, okay, I'm okay with accepting your will to not engage and so we walk past and say, "Hello, how are you today?" And you go, "Hello." And you go, "Phew, got out of that." And that's the feeling that we feel from many of you - a feeling of relief that you didn't have to talk to us. Now many of you know that you've had that feeling frequently, and why is that feeling present? Because there is a definite resistance to hearing truth. [00:33:39.12]

So there's not a love of truth, there's not a desire to know new things that you don't currently know. You want to only hear the things you currently know and have them confirmed. You don't want to hear something new. But to become at-one with God you're going to have to hear lots of new things. And a lot of the new things you're going to have to hear are going to be completely the opposite and completely different than what the average person on Earth believes. And in addition to that it's going to be completely different to what your heart tells you is correct, many times. And you're going to have to give up things. Most of us don't want to. We want to have what we believe confirmed. We don't want to have what we believe challenged. And as a result of that we finish up in this state where we're not at-one with God's Truth.

We want our own truth to be true. It's almost like we're having an argument with God. We're basically saying to God, "Unless you change the whole universe to suit me, I don't want to have a relationship with you." And many of us believe in fact that God will do that because God loves and that's what we believe love would do. Many of us believe that love would make everyone around you conform to what you want. And in a minute I'm going to discuss these kinds of things with you in more detail as to how we go about that.

2.4. Desiring to feel every emotion

Let's look at the next thing – humility - the desire to feel everything, rather than blaming other people for your feelings, or God. And that's only just a part of humility. Like I said we can discuss humility, and we have done for I think about 12 or 15 hours. So there are a lot of parts involved in humility but that is one of the things that is very important to understand. Now for the majority of us, we don't have that desire, we only have that desire when the feelings are what we believe are going to able to be coped with.

So in other words our fear determines how humble we are. Most of us are afraid to go too far in any direction, in terms of how we feel, so what we do is we create constraints in our feelings and emotions that prevent us from feeling the way we truly feel on so many different subjects. And as a result we're not humble; we are governed by our fear. And our fear determines how much we're willing to accept. And because our fear determines how much we're willing to feel, our fear then determines how much we're willing to hear as truth. And our fear determines how loving we're going to become. And if our fear is high, then the amount of love that we're going to finish up having is going to be very low; because our fear will dictate how much love we can express.

Our fear will also dictate how much love we can receive. Many of us are not receiving love at all because we're so afraid of somebody loving us for lots of different emotional reasons, most of which involve the feelings that if somebody loves us they're trying to control us or they're trying to manipulate us and so forth. [00:37:39.08]

So this is a big problem for many, this problem of humility.

2.5. Faith that God is good and loves

Next we want to talk about faith. You remember in our previous presentations, such as "Relationship with God - Faith & Prayer", I've talked a little about faith and I've said that we need to have the kind of faith where we actually allow ourselves to believe that God is good. Many of us don't believe God is good.

For instance, many of you have learnt about the Law of Attraction. How do you feel about the Law of Attraction? When I have discussions with many of you about the Law of Attraction, I can feel from you that you actually hate the Law of Attraction. You think the Law of Attraction is a damn mess, particularly when it's imposed in your own life. And when the Law of Attraction happens, and different events get triggered, many of you still believe, that you want to try to get away from those events somehow, try to manoeuvre around these events.

For example, you see the number of somebody that you don't like very much ringing you on the phone, so what do you do? You decide to answer, or not answer and go to message bank \- which one is it most of the time when it's somebody you don't want to talk to? Isn't it message bank most of the time? And why is that? Why does that happen? Because we don't engage that as a Law of God - that we have attracted this conversation, to learn something and there's a law involved. And we don't have any faith in that. So what we do is we turn off, if you like, all of the chances God's giving us to grow. We turn them all off, we shut them all down, and this is what we do because we don't have faith that God is good and that God loves us and God wants to have a relationship. We don't have faith in those things.

2.6. Using will in harmony with God's Laws

And then lastly, one of the biggest problems we have is that we might believe all of these things are true intellectually, we might accept them all intellectually, but when it comes to exercising our will in harmony with these things, that's where we fall down. In other words we don't have a strong desire to truly be loving. We only have a desire to be loving as long as good things happen as a result. But something bad might happen as a result of us being loving, and by the way it is possible that something bad can happen from the result of us being loving because when other people are not in a loving space sometimes they view what you do in a loving space as unloving. And so they have a response to that. So often times what we're trying to do is we're trying to exercise our will in harmony with self-protection. We're not exercising our will in harmony with love or truth or humility or faith. Instead we're exercising our will in a way that we try to protect ourselves from what is going on, what is happening in our lives: protect ourselves from any - what we see as future harm. We often are exercising our will in that direction only and we will under those circumstances compromise: compromise truth, compromise humility, compromise love; and many of us on a day-to-day basis still compromise love; we still do that. [00:41:34.24]

So if we were truly wanting to put it all together, what we would do is we would exercise our will in harmony with God's Laws. That's what we would do. That's how we would exercise our will. We would not exercise our will out of harmony with God's Laws, whether we know intellectually they're God's Laws or emotionally. As soon as we know intellectually even, without us being aware emotionally, we would want to exercise our will in harmony with what we've learnt. We would not keep giving ourselves excuses.

For instance, one excuse that I hear from many of you is, "I'm not there yet." How many times have you used that one in your personal life? You go, "I know that I should do this but I'm not there yet. I'm not capable of doing that yet." And in particular we see that happening when it comes to telling the truth with other people. "I know I should tell my husband that I cheated on him ten years ago, but I'm not there yet." In other words I'm not in the state yet where I feel like I can be motivated to do that and take the consequences. That's really what we're saying. We're saying I'm not there yet because we're saying we know that God's Laws will all happen a certain way to correct our attitude and we don't really want to engage those laws in the direct manner, and so we try to make excuses for ourselves. That's what we do.

Now they're the primary parts of putting our relationship with God together: they're the primary parts. Now it's a very brief summary, of course we could discuss, and I have done for hours and hours on end, love and what love is and what love isn't and all of those different things. We've got whole seminars where we did whole days of what it means to love another person; whole days of what it means to receive Love from God; whole days of what God's Truth is. And in fact Mary and I will be presenting more information about God's Truth over the coming months. About what is God's Truth, what are the qualities of God's Truth, what are the attributes of God's Truth.

Mary and I have already done humility. Like I've said, we've done five sessions on humility, called "Interview with Jesus - Humility" and talked a lot about what that is, what it looks like, what it feels like, how it is. Remember we've just done a series of talks about faith and prayer called "Relationship with God - Faith & Prayer". And in those we defined faith and what it is and how we can integrate that into our relationship with God and so forth. We've also had many discussions with you about will, the exercise of your will in harmony with love, such as "The Human Soul - The Gift of Free Will". We've had many discussions about that. So my suggestion is if you want to know more about those particular things is to go to those discussions and listen to them again or watch them again because I don't want to so much discuss with you the intricacies of each thing today.

3. Soul progression by audience members

What I would like to discuss with you is the areas that are very obvious for this group of people, not the newer persons as I said, but the persons who have been listening for a fair portion of time. I want to discuss with you what's really going on for many of you in terms of your own progression. [00:45:04.10]

Now can I ask you a direct question? How many of you feel that in the time you've listened to the Divine Truth, you've actually progressed? Can you put up your hand, where you've actually progressed in love? Okay. So would that be the majority? I think so. Maybe I need to ask the opposite. How many of you feel you haven't progressed at all? Just a few of you, okay. So the majority feel you have progressed at least in some way. Okay. How many of you feel that progression is relatively easy? No one feels that. Okay. And how many of you feel, that you are sort of what you would classify, as struggling with it still? How many of you feel you are sort of struggling with it all still. Okay, so the majority again. How many of you feel like it is a breeze, everything is going smoothly, you don't have to worry. No? No one is in that category, okay. How many of you believe that things are going well but sometimes there is a suspicion that they are not going as well as what you would hope. How many of you feel that way? Just a few, okay. No worries.

Well let's look at what is really going on for the group of people who are here. Can I do that? Because I know a lot of you now. How many of you come along to sessions now for five years? There's quite a few of you who are five years. Four years? So now we're talking more than half. Three years? If you keep your hands up, now we're almost talking the majority who are here. Two years? So pretty much aside from a few, there are a lot of you two years at least.

Okay so do you feel that the progression you've made in the time that you've listened to the Divine Truth matches what you believed you would be able to achieve at the beginning of the time you heard about it? (Laughter) How many of you feel that? How many feel that the progression that you have achieved has matched what you believed you would achieve? Okay, just a few.

And to be honest with you, there's good reasons for that because a lot of times at the beginning we have all these concepts that our lives are a certain way, that we have certain influences around us and then through the process of emotional discovery we realise that a lot of things are not what we thought. We realise we're under a lot more spirit influence than we actually thought we were. We realise that we have a lot more addictions than we believed we had in the beginning. We thought that we were a lot more loving, but really when you put us under pressure we're not that loving at all and you find out a lot of things about yourself in the process and so of course what you believed about yourself at the beginning is often very different to what you currently believe about yourself.

So how many of you now believe very different things about yourself than you believed when you first started? Okay, so everyone. And that's what you would expect, isn't it? If God were bringing you towards some truth, there'd be some progress there. [00:48:27.03]

But the big problems that we have are not related to what we know, are they? The big problems we have are what we don't know; that's the big problems we have. And there are many issues that we face, personally, that we would like to ignore. And for many of us we do want to ignore them.

**Mary** : I just wanted to ask if you could explain why the big problem is the things that we don't know as opposed to the things that we do.

Well with the things that we do know, there is at least a consciousness, even from an intellectual perspective, at some level of consciousness that there is a problem in that particular area. But the things we don't know at all, there is neither an intellectual consciousness nor an emotional awareness that it is a problem.

3.1. An example of single women in the audience

So if I can give some examples. Many of you ladies are single, are you not? Can I just have a show of hands of all the people who are single in the audience? So okay, in fact, the majority. Now how many of you are ladies? So okay, the majority of the single people in our audience are in fact women. And yet there is a fairly even mix of men and women in the audience today. But the majority of single people are women. Now do you know why the majority of you believe you are single? Because I can tell you why and if you are honest with yourself you'll be able to feel why.

**Participant** : I like to be in control and I like to believe my mythology and I am terrified.

So you want a partner who you can control.

**Participant** : I would prefer probably someone who'd just do everything I said and fall into line.

Well good luck with that. I don't think that's going to happen.

**Participant** : That's why I'm with no one.

Yeah. But see this is where we have got to be honest with ourselves that that is what we want you see. It is important to be honest, so please don't think I'm making fun about the honesty, because the honesty is very important. It's very important for us to see the real reason of what's going on. So you go, okay, I want control. So is control love? No, so basically what we're saying is we don't want to love, we want control. And what's the internal justification that you can feel for that? What's the feeling inside of you that causes you to feel that control is good?

**Participant** : Well I feel it is fear driven.

Okay so there's fears inside of you that makes you feel that control is good and because you want control you can't love. And honestly it's highly unlikely as well that you will attract the other half of yourself because they're going to go, "Do I want to be controlled? Probably not." And so they're not going to be attracted basically just from that feeling that's coming from you as an individual. So we know that's a problem. How long have you known that's a problem? [00:52:07.26]

**Participant** : I haven't been with anyone for twenty years and I think I'm terrified.

Okay, so you've known it's a problem way before you even met me. You've known this is a problem and nothing's changed on that front. So what would that tell you?

**Participant** : That I'm in error and I need to shift.

But isn't it really telling you that you don't want to shift?

**Participant** : Yes.

Because if you wanted to shift, of course the shift would occur. So this is telling us where we - let's call it stubborn, shall we?

**Participant** : Yes. I'm choosing to let my fear rule this.

No see that's the excuse, you see - that's the excuse and this is where we go.

3.2. Placing fear as our god

See this is what happens when fear rules. You're saying, "I'm choosing to let my fear rule", but that's just an excuse because the reality is if your desire, your will was being exercised in harmony with love, you would ignore your fear, even if you had it. You would ignore it, you wouldn't listen to it. You wouldn't do what it dictates. You would choose instead to do something that you know to be right.

So for example, if you know that when you control, or if you want to control a potential partner, you're not going to get very many potential applicants. If you know that for certain, then surely the most logical thing to do would be to use your will in a different direction. In other words, stop controlling, stop wanting to control. And then of course all your fears would come up and if you were truly humble, you would feel them. You wouldn't hold on to them and you wouldn't say, "I'm using my fear to determine my course of action." Because why would anybody want to use their fear to determine their course of action? It makes no logical sense to use your fear when you know your fear is not actually God's Truth, it's just what you believe to be true.

And so what I'm suggesting is that a lot of times we use these excuses like, "I'm terrified". That's an excuse to not have a relationship. It's not a valid excuse. It's an excuse we want to use and the reason why we want to use it is because we don't want to love, and we don't have a strong enough will and we don't have a strong enough faith that things are going to be different. We believe that every time we engage a new relationship that eventually they're going to either want to control us or I want to control them because they'll do things that might stress me out, may make me feel certain things that I don't want to feel. Well that's a lack of humility because if you just let yourself feel everything, then you wouldn't be worried about that. [00:54:50.08]

So we start seeing these problems that we face are surrounding fear, which many times they are, but what happens is we do this with our fear, and I've told many of you this many times - we make our fear God and everything else comes behind our fear.

So we like the idea of love and we like the idea of truth and we like the idea of becoming humble and we like the idea of having a strong faith in God and in the positive parts of the universe, and we like the idea of using our will with desire and passion and having an expressive life. We like all of those ideas and concepts. But what we have done is we've placed our fear as our God and as soon as we place our fear as our God, all those ideas go out the window the moment our fear is triggered.

The moment our fear starts to come up all we do from that point on is try to suppress it. We're not interested in using our will in harmony with love anymore, we're not interested in the truth anymore, we're not interested in being loving with our brothers and sisters, our friends, the world, animals - all these other things. We're not interested in loving all of those things; we're not interested in trying to maintain a concept that actually God is good. We're not interested in any of those things anymore because our fear is God, and fear is not a good God, we know that. But we feel that we must conform to it every single time. And in making fear our God we are ignoring all of these things in that moment.

3.3. Percentages of the audience who have progressed

So the reason why I asked this question about relationships is this. If I had to break up the whole audience in terms of condition of what's really going on inside, I'd need to break up the women from the men, because it's different for the women than the men generally in the audience. But if we look at the general condition of the majority of us, fifty percent of us still have no idea what it means to practice Divine Truth, and I'm talking about fifty percent who have listened for three to five years still really have no idea. Around forty percent have an idea and have made some progress, but their progress has now either stagnated, or become very frustrating, or has been dictated to by their fear. In other words they've only progressed on the issues that you're not so afraid of. And for the issues that you're terrified of, there's been little or no progress in those areas.

And then around ten percent - so there'd probably be close to one hundred and fifty people here today, so we're talking about fifteen of you - actually do understand what it means to connect emotionally to God and connect emotionally to your emotions and so forth, and actually have made continual progress, and have also started to get beyond your fear. In other words your fear no longer dictates your action, which is something that's been a major change in your life. But there are only around fifteen people in the audience who do that actually, where their fear no longer dictates their actions, or the majority of their actions. There's still fear for all of you that dictate your actions in some cases, but there's around fifteen of us in the audience that actually no longer let themselves be ruled by their fear. So that means in one hundred and fifty people there are basically one hundred and thirty five people who still let their fear dictate everything. [00:59:09.28]

That's why in 2009 and 2010 I gave a whole series of talks about fear. I even did a "Fear Revisited". You remember that? Going back to try and get people to deal with their fears. The reason why is because fear is a major limiting factor on your life. As soon as the fear is triggered, what is happening for the majority of you is you throw away love, you throw away truth, you throw away humility, you throw away faith and you use your will to look after your fear, which is your God.

Many of you have made some progress - I feel there are at least fifty percent of you that have made some progress that I see. When I'm measuring progress I'm not measuring it from the point of view that you lived here and then you moved there because that to me is a sideways shift - you're still on the Earth, it's a sideways shift; and I don't mean that you now have a different job, well that's just a sideways shift. I mean that you've actually become more loving and it's observable to other people. Other people feel you are more loving than you were when you began. Now for many of you, other people feel you are no different than you were five years ago. For some of you other people feel that you are actually worse than you were five years ago, in terms of love; and that can happen because when all of our fears get triggered, what do we have a tendency to do if fear is our god? We start acting in all of our fears and we become more unloving automatically as soon as we act upon our fears.

So what I'm going to do now is break it up into men and women, and what's going on in terms of what's going on for the genders generally in the audience currently. So this doesn't always apply to everybody who's listening to this talk, but rather just the audience currently. Before I do that, what I'd like to do is just talk to you a little about fear and truth.

4. Truth exposes fear

I don't know but do you notice that fear is a bit like ice. Do you notice that? It's like it feels so immovable and so constraining that it feels like you can't do anything else but act in harmony with the fear. That's what it feels like. So let's draw it as a block of ice. Now I often liken truth to water, so let's say that block of ice is floating in some water. Where would the water level be on the ice under normal circumstances, if we're talking from a scientific perspective? Is it 2/3's? 1/8, 7/8's? How much does H2O expand when it gets cold? Well let's draw it at about one eighth. [01:02:38.04]

So if fear is a block of ice and the water is truth, can you see that truth has only exposed a certain amount of your fear at this point in time only? You've only become conscious of this fear that is above the water line of the block of ice. Already for many of you that's too much. But it's your fear that prevents most of the engagement of all of the principles of putting it altogether with your relationship with God.

Using an analogy of fear being ice floating in water of truth, we are only aware of the fear in us that is above the water line and has been exposed by truth

It's mostly the refusal to do these things - love, truth, humility, faith and will, which is only dictated to you by your fear - that causes you to stop doing these things, which means that you can no longer put it all together and it means that your relationship with God is affected: and this part of the ice that is above the water line is the only part of your fear that you've allowed yourself to expose. So above the water line is the fear that you could say you were aware of; that's what you're aware of. Below the water line is all of the fear that's inside of you that you're completely unaware of. Now who is frightened about that concept? So we're frightened about a concept that explains where we are about fear: and often we are afraid of what we're actually seeing.

So for pretty much all of us this is how our life is until we engage more truth. When we engage more truth, it's like draining the cup of water. So imagine this ice and water is in a cup, so let's put it inside of a cup. Now if you have more truth, it's like tipping out that water level so the water level reduces. So if the water level reduces what happens? The more truth that happens, the more fear is exposed. Is that not true? Isn't that what happens when we start processing through issues of truth in our day-to-day life? We get more afraid, generally. That's what happens. [01:05:07.15]

Tipping out the water, by receiving more truth, exposes more fear

5. Major areas of avoidance of fear

Now for most of us we have what I would call a fear tolerance level. Do you notice your fear tolerance level in the course of a day? Most of us have a fear tolerance level. To be frank most of your fear tolerance levels are so strong that you're in complete denial that you have any fear at all on certain issues. That's how strong your fear tolerance level is. In other words your fear tolerance level is so low that you will not allow yourself to be conscious of any fear that you actually have on certain issues.

And in particular there are two issues that are primarily affected by these choices and decisions that you are making collectively. One issue is this - the issue of your relationship with God; your belief systems about God that you do not wish to confront. The second one is your relationship with the other half of yourself, your soulmate. Remember that's the other half of yourself. And the third issue is yourself, which is your own soul. These are the three biggest avoidances that you have inside of yourself about truth.

So when somebody comes along and talks to you about some kind of external truth, you go, "No worries, I can accept that, that sounds really good, it's a great concept, a great idea. I'm so fascinated about that area of study." But when somebody comes along and says, "Do you know that you are quite a nasty woman actually?" And if you're a woman, not a man, you'll probably feel that as an attack on you, even though it might be true. You might be quite a nasty woman, actually: but you feel it as an attack and so what you do is you don't want to become conscious of that because you're afraid that you are in the end. And so what you do is you rub out of your life any awareness of your own self.

5.1. Beliefs surrounding relationships

Then when it comes to being single versus being in a relationship, many of us do not wish to examine why we are single. We believe the main reason why we are single is because there are no good men out there or no good women out there. We believe that it's other people that are the problem; that's what we believe. And if we are honest with ourselves the majority of us who are single do believe that the problem is there are no good people to find - we do believe these things. And why do we believe these things? Because we've got a lot of fear about this relationship that we don't want to address; we don't want to expose; we don't want the fear to be heightened; and so what we do is we deny all truth about it: and the being we do that the most with is God. That's the reality.

5.2. Beliefs surrounding having a relationship with God and how we treat God's Creations

Many of you believe that a relationship with God is possible without having love for your fellow man or for the other half of yourself or for yourself. So many of us believe that a relationship with God is possible even though we don't like ourselves, even though we have a problem with the opposite gender or the same gender, depending on what kind of an attraction it is. So shall we call it we have a problem with our soulmate attraction. And even though we treat others, who are neither of the first two things - ourselves or our soulmate - badly, we believe that a relationship with God is possible, while we treat other people badly. And a relationship with God is not ever going to be possible while we treat other people badly, ever. [01:09:18.04]

So of course there's degrees of how we treat people. So if we treat other people badly half the time, then half the time we might be able to have a relationship with God because the other half the time we're treating other people well and so therefore in that interaction we can actually have some kind of relationship with God. If we want to become at-one with God, which is being connected with God all of the time, then we must have love for every single one of those people; ourselves, the other half of ourselves, and any other person.

But if we really want to become at-one with God we're not only going to have to have love for that we're also going to have to have love for all of God's Living Creations, and also love and respect for all of the inanimate creations and how we deal with all of them.

So in other words at some point in time we're going to have to love our physical body. So if we're there still drinking alcohol, which is killing brain cells in our physical body, you can't really say in that place that you love yourself. If you're still getting angry with your partner all the time you can't really say you love your partner. If you're still projecting at other people that they're not as good as you or they're worse than you are or you're condescending towards them, even just slightly feeling frustrated with them, then you're not loving them. They're allowed to exercise their own will - so this is a part of not loving people.

If we're using animals and other creatures for our own benefit and we're willing to destroy their life in order to have that occur, then we're not even loving them; and if we're willing to manipulate animals in order to get things from them, we're not loving them either.

So there are a lot of areas where we're not loving under those circumstances. And we can't expect to have a relationship with God while we're doing all those things, because God created all those things. You, your soulmate, others, their soulmates, all other living creatures - everything was created by God. You can't expect to have a loving relationship with God while we're being unloving with all those things. And we're never going to be loving with all those things while our fear is the most dominant thing in our life. Because whenever compromise is put in our face, where we have to compromise what we're doing or love, if we honour fear we will always do what fear dictates: we won't love; we'll always do what the fear wants.

5.3. Increasing awareness of fear through truth

The fear has become our god for the majority of us, and the only thing that's going to reduce that and improve our awareness of our own fear is truth. And what do the majority of us feel about truth? We feel, "Just give us enough." Isn't that how you feel most of the time? Don't give me too much, just give me enough. Mary and I are often finding now that people ask us to spend a bit of time with them or whatever, and they want to ask us some personal questions, which we generally don't do that much of anymore, but they want to ask us personal questions and we say to them, "Are you ready to know the truth?" And they say, "Yes." And you start a conversation and ten minutes in, there's no willingness to know the truth generally at all because everyone has a fear threshold that's usually quite small in fact. Most people are not willing to be challenged in any way with regard to their fears. [01:13:07.10]

And so because their fear threshold is very small you're only ever going to get to know a little bit of truth. So it's going to be like dribble, dribble, dribble, dribble, dribble type of progress. Now there's a good chance if let's say you started progressing towards God when you were forty or fifty, and you decide to dribble the progress, then you're definitely going to die before you're at-one with God, if you decide to dribble it. It's like drip, drip, drip, drip, drip. Eventually the glass will get full but only after many millions of drips. Is that what you want? And while that's all happening of course, there are external pressures on you, trying to get you to conform to old ways of living, to old ways of belief systems and everything, all these pressures going on. Sooner or later you probably want to conform because your fear will dictate that you do.

So this problem with fear is a huge problem for many of you still. Many of you are completely unaware of what you're afraid of, which is the biggest problem, because if you're unaware of it, you're never going to feel it. And the only way you can let go of fear is by feeling it. You can't let go of it any other way. It's the same with grief; the only way you can let go of grief is by feeling it. The only way you can let go of anger is by feeling it. The only way you can let go of your addictions is by feeling them. That's the only way you're ever going to let go of anything - by feeling it. And if you're unwilling to feel the fear, the grief, the anger, the addictions, then progression is not possible. And you can hear a lot of things that you agree with, but you won't have progressed. You'll be the same as you were years ago.

5.4. Dealing with not wanting to know ourselves

**Participant** : AJ, I'm sitting in that area of unawareness of the fear and not wanting to go there so would the best way to start be to ask God to show me my true self. Would the fear be revealed in that?

Most of us don't want to know our true selves. So where's the best way to start?

**Participant** : Being honest.

And just saying to yourself, "I don't want to know my true self." And then what would you do if you were really wanting to progress? You'd say, "I don't want to know my true self, obviously I'm going to have to know my true self sooner or later," what would you do next?

**Participant** : Well I'd try to engage a relationship with God so I can...

A relationship with God won't be possible while you don't want to know yourself. So what's the point in trying to have a relationship with God when you don't want to know yourself? See what I would do is this. If I'd worked out that I don't want to know me, really what you're saying is you don't want yourself, you don't want to be yourself, you don't want to know yourself, you don't want yourself. This is a common problem for many people - you don't want yourself. If I felt that and I knew that to be true, my very next course of action would be to go, "Okay, I know that the only way I can change is by feeling - humility tells me that. The only way I'm going to change on this belief is by feeling it." [01:16:36.25]

**Participant** : Feeling that I don't want to know myself?

Yes. Feeling you don't want to know yourself. And then you feel you don't want to know yourself, you will then feel why. That will be the subsequent result of feeling that you don't want to know yourself. You will then feel why you don't want to know yourself.

**Participant** : So the 'why' will not become before the feeling initially?

No. See many of you are trying to put the 'why' before the feeling. You do it all the time. And I keep saying to you there is a feeling above a feeling, not a thought. Many of you still are trying to have thoughts before you have feelings. So what you do is you go, "Okay I know I'm not progressing, I know I'm not doing this, I know I'm not doing that, I wonder why that is?" And you use your mind and you're trying to work out why. No, no, stop, just stop all of that. Feel that you don't want to know. Feel it. How much you don't want to know about yourself - feel that. Feel how angry you are about having to know yourself. Feel those feelings.

5.4.1. An example of wanting control

**Participant** : Well I think the first step for me is not wanting to know myself, is that I'd have to let go of my control to know myself, first wouldn't I?

So feel your control. Feel your control. Sit down with your control every day and notice every single time you try to control. Feel it. Feel the level of your control. That's feeling your addiction. Feel your addiction. Feel the level of control. Feel how much you want to control and when you feel it you'll work out why you want to control. You won't work it out intellectually because the feelings will just come up. "Oh I want to control because every time I don't get to control I'm...." you know, you work out that you're trying to avoid some emotion. It might be only one emotion you're trying to avoid. And you'll work it out because you've felt that you want control.

Many of you don't even realise that you want control. I'm putting to you that every single one of you who are single in the audience today, unless you're under twenty-five, wants control. That's one of the reasons why you're not with a partner is because you want control. Many of you who are with a partner today still want control, and you've got a partner you can control. It took many years to find him or her, and now you've got him or her you're not going to let him go because you want control. They are your ideal partner because they are the person that gives you everything that you want. Many of us are not willing to see that. We're not willing to see that. We're not willing to see what's going on inside of ourselves in reality. [01:19:24.19]

5.4.2. An example of single women in the audience (continued)

So how many of you are ladies who are single? Just out of interest. So probably forty percent of the audience, maybe. That's a lot in a percentage, isn't it, forty percent of the audience. Have you ever given consideration to the fact that you are not very pleasant to live with? Have you given consideration to that? Okay, what do you want to do about it? You see, at the moment you're letting your fear dictate that. The reason why you've become unpleasant to live with is because of your fear. It's only because of your fear. It's the things you're afraid of facing inside of yourself, feelings you're afraid of having inside of yourself that would cause that to occur. Feel that. Feel that. Allow yourself to feel it because when you feel it you'll realise why. When you realise why, you can change. But you're not going to change until you realise why.

5.4.3. Feeling how much we don't want to know ourselves

You see feel what you currently don't want. See many people have asked me this question, "Maybe I should just develop my relationship with God more?" Well you can't develop a relationship with God when you don't want to know yourself. And you don't want to be truly honest with God about yourself. So from God's Perspective, God will feel far closer to you if you honour the fact that you don't want yourself. You don't want to feel yourself and you feel how much you don't want to. In that moment you'll be closer to God than you've ever been before actually. You don't have to do anything else other than feel that, in that moment.

But what I see most of you trying to do is you're trying to work out what's going on before you feel. Your feeling of fear will stop you from even working it out. You need to feel your fear first and let go of some of the fear and then you'll work it out. But many of you want to know before you feel. Is that not a problem for the majority of us in fact; we want to know things before we feel them. Because we want to know that we're not crazy, we're not stupid, that it's a real feeling, that we've justified having the feeling. We even go to other people, "You see I have this feeling because..." Who cares why you have the feeling? Just feel it. [01:22:03.16]

Many of you still get involved in this discussion. "How have you felt this week?" "I felt this and I realised it's because of this and because of that and because of this that I feel that. Well what about yourself?" "Oh yes I had this happen and I had this thing come up and I realised it's because of this." What's going on? What are you doing this for? It's a waste of time because you're not feeling it. If you felt it truly, you wouldn't need to do it in fact. You wouldn't even need to discuss it with another person if you felt it truly. You would just feel it.

We are addicted to having other people be involved in our own emotional work. We are addicted because we want certain things from them. We want them to make us feel safe; we want to know because if someone else is going through it then it means that my feeling is valid. We want to know that because someone else is experiencing a similar thing or they've had an emotion this week that that means I'm allowed to have one too. And it's all just rubbish actually. It's all just our fear dictating our further progress.

And what are the fears? They are the fears you don't see. The fear of other people's approval, the fear of not having any acceptance, the fear of not having other people like you, the fear that other people don't agree with you and you're the only person on the planet who actually feels that particular thing. The fear that you're stupid, that you're strange, that you're crazy, that you're weird, all of these fears are the fears that you try to make go away by having somebody else come along and have a chat with them about your feelings. So you're actually in addiction dealing with your emotion. Now can you really ever deal with an emotion while you're in an addiction? Of course you can't. You're only going to be dealing with the emotion that you're fear is allowing you to deal with.

6. Our fear creates a prison of our own making

So for many I feel what's going on is this; our fear has become like a prison of our own making. This is what it's like; we've got this prison and our fear by the way dictates how big the prison is. So the less fear we have, the bigger the prison is, in other words we have more freedom. The more fear we have, the smaller the prison is. In other words it's like a solitary confinement cell when our fear is very, very large. And we have stuck ourselves inside of this. We are constrained by this prison that we have created, that our fear dictates. [01:24:51.27]

And while that remains the case, even when you discover Divine Truth and you discover the way to God through emotional change, you will find that you will only allow yourself to experience emotions that the boundaries of your fear will accept. So if your fear is very large, your cell will be very small and the boundaries of what your fear will allow you too actually process emotionally will be very small, very tight. You'll only be able to get into certain things emotionally and work your way through them, within that boundary. If your fear is less than that, then your boundaries might be larger but you still have boundaries.

Fear creates a virtual prison in our lives

And everything outside of this boundary is the real stuff that's going to help your relationship with God. Feeling that is going to help your relationship with God the most. Feeling the area inside the prison, will only let you have a relationship with God that's constrained by exactly the same boundaries. That's all it's going to do. Your whole life, for the rest of your life, will be dictated to by what your fear will allow you to experience. And unless that changes, unless something changes, where your fear and what it allows you to experience grows, nothing will change in your life.

What I see many of you doing is you allow certain emotions, so that might be an emotion of grief, where you cry that much to that boundary. And that might be the direction of your grief, you can cry to that boundary.

Our prison of fear constrains how much grief we can feel

You will cry no more because your fear is telling you to stop and you honour your fear before you honour anything else. You don't honour God there, you don't honour love, you don't honour faith, you don't honour humility, you don't want more truth in that place, you only will allow yourself to experience grief to that point. That's it.

Some of you will only allow yourself to experience grief if it's a spirit with you. In other words, you're experiencing the grief of spirits who are attracted to you or are attached to you before you will let yourself feel any of your own grief. So for many of you, all of the crying that you've ever done wasn't yours. That seems to be a waste; and the reason why you do that is because your fear will only let you do that. It's your fear, you want somebody to be with you all the time when you experience an emotion, and if it's not a person you'd prefer it to be a spirit person. So you let yourself process that way.

Some of you are in complete denial of this level of control that you have over your lives with your fear.

Putting It All Together: Session 1 Part 2

7. Developing a desire to feel childhood fear as an adult

**Participant** : I can only honestly say that I've touched on my childhood fear a couple of times in five years, when the prison came down just a little bit, and those times were so terrifying, the fear... bodily experiencing the fear itself, that I haven't been willing to go there.

Yeah, I agree.

**Participant** : So the question is, the adult side of me that builds the prison is really very justified. I justify it.

You do.

**Participant** : Because when I feel that childhood fear, it's like rationally I tell myself I get a little slice of it...

So really what you're saying...

**Participant** : More fear, I'm terrified of that actual loss of control.

Yes, you are terrified of being overwhelmed.

**Participant** : I'm not sure what the question is, it is just that it's very scary.

There hasn't been a question yet. Can you ask one? So what are you asking really? What's the thing you'd like to ask?

**Participant** : That my adult self feels very justified to build that big brick wall and isolate myself from... so what do you do with that?

Can I ask you a question? What are you going to do about that? Because no change is possible without you doing something about it.

**Participant** : But that childhood fear is hideous.

Yes, I agree. Whenever a person's been abused as a child there are going to be terrible feelings involved.

**Participant** : What do I want to do about it? Well I could answer you and say I want to change it, but that's a lie.

That's correct; it is a lie at the moment, that's why things haven't changed. You see this is what I see happening constantly. Things have happened to us, some of the things that have happened to us weren't under our own control at the time. Particularly if the things that happened to us were when we were a child and were very damaging things; they weren't under our control at the time. We had certain feelings associated with that as a child.

But we are now an adult. We have control over what goes on in this system. This is our internal system, we have control of it. Your adult is going, "I justify keeping this prison." Now for as long as you justify keeping the prison, you will keep it. So you could stay in this state of keeping this prison, in a state of anger really it is if you think about it, and you're not even feeling it as anger yet. You're not feeling how angry you are with God and with the universe and everything and that God is expecting you to actually go through these emotions. [00:03:58.04]

Of course God's saying, "I will help you go through everything," but you don't really believe that. You don't have faith in that; you believe it's all just going to have to be you alone. And you have no faith that after you've gone through that, that you'll be free. You don't have any faith in that either. This is why you've established the prison. You see the prison not as a prison; you see it as your protective walls against the world. And that's a great way of staying in a prison; if you don't believe it's a prison anymore, and you believe it's actually your fortress instead, of course there's a higher likelihood you'll stay in it.

So as the adult, you see this as your fortress, not your prison. So you're already seeing things in a flawed manner, it's your prison, it's controlling most of your life; it's controlling your relationships, it's controlling your soulmate relationship, it's controlling your relationship with God, it controls what's happening to your body even, in terms of physically what's happening with your body. They are all controlled by this and you're unwilling to let it go because the adult is saying, "The child is justified, I'm justified holding on to this prison. I am justified having all these protective barriers up. I'm justified having all this fear, it makes sense for me to have all this fear and keep it inside of me."

**Participant** : It just feels like that childhood fear is bigger.

How can it be bigger, logically? How can it be bigger than you are yourself right now? It can't logically be bigger. It's an emotion that entered you as a child. As an adult you now have the ability to release it. You now have the choice and you are exercising your choice, your will, and by the way you're not alone, the majority of people in the audience are exercising their will in their choice to maintain in this adult state of anger, saying, "That's where I want to be, I don't want to be any different to that. And the fact that God expects me to let go of stuff that I feel is too big for me to feel."

God's saying, "No, no, no, with me everything is possible. You can feel anything with me." That's what God's saying but you don't trust that yet. And because you don't trust that and have faith in that you don't want to exercise your will in the direction of release. And because you don't exercise your will in the direction of release, you spent five years complaining about what's happened in your life in the past, and not changing. And the only person who has the most pain from that is you. Can you see? By not releasing, the only person who retains the pain is yourself. Of course you impose this pain upon others, so you actually cause pain for others during that place as well, but the person in the largest amount of pain for not dealing with something inside of yourself, is yourself. That's the reality. And the majority of us don't want to hear that. The majority of us want to hear that there's got to be another way. You feel at the moment that God should make some other way for you to become at-one with God other than you having to feel you.

7.1. Fear must be felt to grow towards God

**Participant** : I was just thinking that as you were talking. There has to be another way.

"There has to be another way". And in fact many of you have actually spent the last five years trying to find another way, more than you've spent trying to practice the basics to lead you this way. You've spent most of your time trying to find an alternative. Of course every alternative doesn't make any logical sense; it's not truthful, it's not emotional in its way so it doesn't have any effect in the long run, and eventually you come around to think, "Yeah maybe there is only one way." But when a person is told there is only one way to God initially, they go, "No, that's not the case. There's got to be millions of ways to God. There's got to be infinite ways to God." And I'm saying, "No, no, I'm sorry, there's only one way to God that God actually created." And that way is going to mean experiencing yourself. And that means experiencing every single thing inside of you. That means that God created you with the capacity and ability to feel everything that's happened to you in the past, no matter how traumatic and how bad it's been. [00:08:14.21]

7.2. False beliefs surrounding feeling fear

**Participant** : When I'm in that childhood fear I don't have that ability to trust.

No see I would suggest to you that when you're in the childhood fear truly, you will trust implicitly. You're not in the childhood fear yet, you've got the adult constantly monitoring how big the fear is getting, and in your case it's terror that you need to experience. So you've got terror to experience, and the adult is maintaining the boundary. So the adult you is saying to the child you, if you like, "You are only allowed to feel your terror until I get freaked out." And the child wants to let go of all of its terror and the adult is saying, "No, you can only let go of the terror until I (the adult) get freaked out, till it's too much for me." So it's actually the adult that's got the problem, not the child. The child wants to let it all go.

If you look at your own children, and any of you who have got children know that if you let your child cry, it will get to a point where it finishes. And a lot of times if you control the child's crying it goes longer than when the child was just let to cry by itself. That's the reality. Now I've had two children, I know what I'm talking about when it comes to those kinds of issues. What happens as an adult is we want to control the child, not because the child's going through a bad experience, because often the child doesn't feel it is, it's because we are going to get triggered by the child's experience and we try to shut down the child. The whole reason why most of the time we can't cope with a child crying is because we don't want to cry. The adult doesn't want to.

Now if you apply that to yourself, you will see that your child has lots of different emotions to feel. Some anger, terror, fear, grief and the big one that many people avoid, shame. The child has a lot of emotions it wants to feel but the adult goes, "You can only feel that in amongst the boundary I create for you." Beyond that boundary you're afraid of what? Going crazy. Are you not? Going crazy, always being there.

The adult maintains the boundary around the emotions the inner child needs to feel because it is afraid of going crazy and other issues

What would you call that when you feel like you're going to always stay in a certain emotion? You have a false belief, for many of us that if we start crying, we'll never finish.

**Participant** : The fear of craziness is definite and mental illness.

But even bigger for you is your fear of your own shame.

**Participant** : Yep.

You know, your father blamed you for his abuse of you and you've now taken that on and you now believe that you must have somehow asked for this abuse to occur. And the feeling of that shame is so great, that you, adult you, wants to prevent it. So it creates a boundary. The adult you creates the boundaries, not the child - the child wants to feel. The child always wanted to feel. It's only the adults around us, our parents initially, our environment, but then eventually ourselves; right now it's ourselves for the majority of us who create the boundaries that allow what we'll experience, and we are locked into that; and we're not willing to stretch that, we're not willing to go beyond the boundaries, we're afraid of being this terrible word, overwhelmed. We want to be whelmed, if there is such a word. (Laughter) [00:12:18.28]

Resistance to feeling the above emotions are common blockages to feeling fear

In other words, we want there to be a limit to what happens, we don't want to go beyond what we believe is our own personal limit. Now God created you without limits. God created you with the ability to expand your limitations infinitely in fact. That's why Divine Love transforms the soul as it's received in such a way as to making it more infinite in its nature to experience and expand. That can only happen by this overwhelming part. But we don't want to go there, the adult wants control. The adult wants to avoid the fear; the adult wants to have God as its fear. And the adult generally forgets that God is God and instead believes their fear is god. And as a result they place these boundaries on every emotion and so you'll only experience the emotion up until the point of the boundary.

We make fear our god when we choose not to feel it

The majority of you are facing this problem; the reason why we are stagnant in our progression in our relationship with God is because we are placing limitations upon the expressions of our emotions. That's what we're doing, constantly. And we're doing that because we believe we can't cope with anything more. We don't have any trust in God, we don't have any faith that God will be with us while we go through our emotional state, while we process through it and come out the other side.

A person who does that will never process through terror, will never process through fear, will never process through their own grief, and will never process even through their anger - that's the limitation of doing it. You will never process through it to the point of completion. And this is one reason why many abuse survivors, for example, spend years and years and years going to psychotherapy and yet still never getting it all out of themselves.

7.2.1. An example of childhood abuse

I used to attend a meeting of what was called adult survivors of childhood abuse, and I went to those meetings for five years. What I found was that the story they told me when I arrived at the meeting was the same story they were telling people five years later who arrived at the meeting for the first time. In other words for five years they had been going to see psychotherapists, visiting this meeting, talking about their abuse and yet still the abuse was as raw as it was the day that I had met them. And how did that occur? It occurred because they had placed limitations on their experience. That's the addiction and if we place limitations on our experience we will never get to the bottom of anything. We'll never get to the bottom of anything.

And while it's great for you, Jenn, to see that that is the case, the real question is how long do you want this to last? That is the real question. Because to be frank with you, there are people in the spirit world now who have been there for a thousand years, and they have wanted it to last for a thousand years. They are unwilling to face the abuse of their own childhood while they lived on Earth, from a thousand years ago. It is just as raw today for them as it was a thousand years ago when it occurred. Do you want that? Do you want to change that? Because the only way to change that is by changing this adult's beliefs. Not the child - the child will be fine, the child's going to be under God's Wing, working her way through every emotion. The adult is the problem. The adult is the one who wants to control the process. [00:16:38.05]

7.3. Valuing fear blocks the five basics required to grow towards God

And the problem is we're in this place, in the prison, we're willing to throw away love, we're willing to throw away truth, we're willing to throw away humility, we're willing to throw away faith, we're willing to even throw away our own will power just to maintain this structure, which does not bring us any happiness. It's going to keep us in the same place we are today and in ten year's time, fifty year's time, a hundred year's time, two hundred year's time, a thousand year's time, unless we change, we will be that person for that time.

And this is where it all gets down doesn't it really to this wonderful quality - humility. Because without humility, change is not possible. Humility allows you to experience something beyond which you feel you're capable of experiencing, but which God knows you are fully capable of experiencing.

7.4. Working through fear with or without God's Assistance

**Participant** : I'm just wondering is it ever possible really for anyone to get through terror without God?

I don't believe it's possible without God; however there are many people who are in the sixth dimension of the spirit world who believe they have released most of their terror without God.

**Participant** : So I was going to ask actually, do they have those fears in them?

Well, they have one primary fear still, which is a fear of having a relationship with God. So they still haven't released all their terror, but they've often released quite a lot. Because they realise sooner or later that they have to experience it in order to release it. So many people who are on what you call the Natural Love Path are actually releasing emotions by experiencing their emotions; they're just not doing it with God. They're not having a relationship with God that they're trying to develop during the process. They're not open to God's Truth. But it is very hard.

**Participant** : So it takes much longer?

Of course. You imagine releasing your terror without having a backup person. And I don't mean a backup person on Earth, I mean God in that regard. It is difficult but it can be done because God created you to be able to release everything by yourself, actually.

**Participant** : So it's basically because of not trusting in God that people don't want to go there? Because if they trusted they would allow themselves to go to that, past that limit?

No I feel a lot of the problems are related to the trust of themselves - that God created within them the ability to feel everything. If we truly trusted God we would understand that one fact about ourselves - that God created us in such a way that we are capable of experiencing everything, and particularly we are capable of experiencing everything that happened in our past. It's already happened, we've already experienced it. So we're definitely capable of experiencing it. And particularly as an adult we're definitely capable of experiencing it considering that for a lot of it, the very negative things that happened to us happened as a child. So we are certainly capable as an adult to experience those things that have happened as a child. [00:20:00.21]

7.5. Our fear is carried with us everywhere

The issue that most of us face is that we don't want to. We don't want to feel a lot of these kind of feelings of being overwhelmed, of feeling crazy, feeling stupid, everyone around us telling us that we're nuts doing it and all those kinds of things. That you've got to get control and you've got to get rigid with yourself, you've got to move on and you've got to forget the past and all these kind of things, which you can't ever do unless you release the emotion. Because the emotional signature of the past will be carried with you wherever you go. (AJ sings) "Everywhere you go, you always take the weather"; that's true.

You will take with you the internal weather system you are creating that you are not allowing change everywhere you go. Everywhere you go. You can change locations, so you can move from the sunny coast to here, doesn't change a single thing. You can move from here to the spirit world, doesn't change anything. It's only when you realise that you're taking the weather with you and unless you face what the weather is inside of you, unless you face what is inside of you, you're willing to actually truthfully address and actually feel and you realise that, that any progression can occur. So do it. Make the choice to do it. Now many of us have a lot of spirit interference with making that choice, we have a lot of issues with making the choice personally.

7.6. We must be overwhelmed to grow

But the biggest issue that we have most of the time is just we don't ever want to be overwhelmed.

**Participant** : And yet it's the best feeling afterwards, it's the best.

Of course, because when you're overwhelmed, you release something and therefore there's a feeling of release. But it only happens when you're overwhelmed generally. And for the majority of us what we're trying to do is we're trying to feel our feelings and do our life in very strict borders, we are trying to do it within these borders and it's only when we're willing to actually feel beyond those borders that we've created, that we finish up changing. So it's a big problem for us.

8. Common emotional injuries in males in the audience

I've talked about some of the women's issues. For many of you men you know what your primary fear is? Do you have any idea? What your primary fear is?

**Participant** : Being alone for the rest of your life without a woman. (Laughter)

Yeah, let's narrow that down a little further shall we.

**Participant** : Why is that funny?

Why is that funny? Yeah. I think because a lot of others feel the same thing. But go on, from that what is actually happening?

**Participant** : Not feeling loved.

Yes. But specifically it's love from a women, isn't it?

**Participant** : Yeah.

So you're not interested in being loved by a man.

**Participant** : To a degree, but not as much.

Yeah, okay. So what is it that the love of a woman's meant to give you?

**Participant** : Wholeness.

Okay. So you feel incomplete without it.

**Participant** : Yeah, probably, I'm not sure.

Isn't it interesting that you put up your hand though with so much firmness about it.

**Participant** : Well it's what I've been going through.

I agree but you're not sure about it.

**Participant** : I don't know. I've been going through a process with my partner that I actually realised that I've actually got to go through a process of letting her go rather than forcing everything and trying to make her be more loving and whatever else.

Yeah. But see your action has been in the past to try to force the woman into becoming more loving with you.

**Participant** : Yes.

But the average man in this audience doesn't do that. You know what he does?

**Participant** : I don't know.

So you have had demands that you've placed on the woman in order for the woman to love you.

8.1. The addiction of pleasing women

The average man in the audience doesn't do that. They do the opposite. What's the opposite of that? Come on guys, you're the ones who feel these things. [00:24:19.29]

**Participant** : Please the woman.

Yeah, pander to her every whim, even when her whims are completely out of harmony with love, completely out of harmony with truth, completely out of harmony with humility for herself, completely out of harmony with any faith in God, completely out of harmony with even the exercise of your own free will: and yet you're willing to just pander, pander, pander, pander, pander under the belief that at some point in the future she might love you and you might get that feeling that she loves you. And of course the more you do for her, the less you feel loved, which is the law in fact. God's Law is the more you do for other people that you are giving, feeding an addiction, the less you're going to feel something, not more. That's the law.

Do you know what most of us guys need to learn? To have a backbone. That's what we need to learn, to have a backbone to honour love, honour truth, honour humility, honour faith, honour will - honour these things with your partner, forget about trying to get her approval. If you do those things, you will automatically have the approval of every other person that does those things. Now if your partner is not one of those people, well then you're not going to have her approval, ever, actually until she also honours love, honours truth, honours humility, honours faith and honours will. You are not ever going to have any decent relationship. That's the reality.

And you can pander, pander, pander all you like, but you're not going to have any relationship until you honour those particular things. And she might then go through a huge amount of rage with you and leave you and all those other things, and you have to feel your emotions, because that's what humility would do. You'd have to still tell her the truth, "No I'm not going to do what you want because you're just trying to control me." You'd have to tell her the truth even though she might leave you as result of you telling her the truth. For the majority of you guys you are just pandering over and over again, in the end for the same goal that Alex mentioned, but Alex does a different thing than most of you do. Alex tried to push the woman into doing that for him. You are trying to cajole the woman into doing that for you. Can you see that? For the majority of you guys, can you see that? Yeah. It's happening all the time for many of you. [00:26:55.18]

8.2. Common fears in males in the audience pertaining to women

**Participant** : Is the bottom line fear? Is it coming from what you asked, Alex - fear that I'm not okay?

Of course the bottom line is fear. Whenever we do any of these things, whenever we sacrifice love, truth, humility, faith and will, or even one of them, fear is always the bottom line. So what would the fear be?

**Participant** : The fear that I'm not okay.

That I'm not okay. Yes. But you don't feel that you're not okay when you're with other men. Definitely for you, it's a much less feeling, isn't it? You feel a lot more equal with other men. But when it comes to that specific relationship with your partner, now you feel that you're not okay unless you do everything she wants and then she makes you feel like you're okay. So that feeling is certainly a problem, isn't it? But it could be many other feelings, and the truth is all we'd be doing is guessing all of the feelings until we decide to have the humility to feel them, to feel our fear firstly of what it is we're trying to achieve.

So you know that your wife or your partner wants you to do something, and you don't really want to do it and what you do is, you just sit there and go, "I don't really want to do this but I know she wants me to do it and I know she's going to get upset with me if I don't do it." And if you just sit there and feel that, you'll start to feel why you feel so addicted to doing that. And you feel the fear of it - what it feels like to receive her disapproval so strongly. What does it feel like? And a lot of you feel totally gutted just to receive a woman's disapproval. That's the reason why you have no backbone with women, because you feel gutted when the disapproval comes at you. And so if you felt it and did not act instead and just felt it, you would work out what's under it. You would work out what fear is under it, what it is you are afraid of.

Now for some of you it's afraid of that you'll never have sex for the rest of your life because the only way you have sex is by doing exactly what the woman wants. In other words you're in a bartering system for sex - for some of you it's like that. For some of you you're in a bartering system for approval. So in other words you try to do everything possible to make the woman just have a good feeling about you. So the woman feels like, "Oh he's a lovely person," or, "He's a lovely man." Or some of you are bartering for the feeling of sexual attraction coming from your partner - in other words that your partner wants you. Some of you are bartering for the feeling that you're better than any other man. In other words you want to feel that you are better in her eyes than any other man. Some of you are looking for that.

But whatever the reason is, you're not going to find it until you feel what the fear is that's on top of it. And the only way you're going to feel what the fear is, is by stop pandering and feel the barrage of rage that comes from her and feel what you feel like as a result, and be humble to that emotion. Many of you are not humble to that emotion. You get the barrage of rage and then what happens is you get in a rage in response. You get the disapproval from her and then you feel really angry that you've gotten the disapproval. You get the desire to control from her and then you get really angry that now she wants to control you rather than feeling the grief that comes with the feelings. If we're humble, that's what we'll do - feel the grief that comes with the feeling of not being approved of, not being loved, not being wanted, not being sexually acceptable and all these other emotions that might come up as a result.

We're locked into the concept that we can only go a certain way and the rest is their fault. "They need to change first" is what we're always thinking. And we're not being an adult about it because we're not saying, "Well obviously this feeling is inside of me." As you said Paul, if I feel good about myself, if the woman wanted me to do something that was out of harmony with love, truth, humility, faith and will I would draw the line. I'd say, "No I can't do that." No matter what the result, if it meant that she walked out the door and walked off with another guy, you'd still have the line. And I would say if she walked off with another guy for you having a line drawn down those qualities, then it means she's not very focused on those qualities herself. And a lot of times we don't want to find that out either. So we need to allow ourselves to confront these boundaries that we're placing there.

8.3. Common addictions in the males in the audience that prevent a relationship with God

Now for many of you guys, the reason why you're not having a close relationship with God is because you do not want to feel many of those emotions; you just don't want to feel them. You'd rather get angry or you'd rather avoid them, or for many of you you'd rather just get busy. You'd rather busy yourself up. You don't want to spend time with the girl because every time you spend time with the girl it causes these certain fears and particularly the grief to be triggered that you don't want to feel, and so it's better if you're busy doing this or busy doing that. So we become workaholics. [00:32:45.14]

A lot of men become alcoholics as well, busy drinking to get rid of the fear. And in particular to get rid of the fear of the grief that's present within them. Every man who's an alcoholic is full of grief about his relationship with his partner generally. Full of grief: and yet he doesn't want to feel it. And if we want to progress towards God, we're going to need to feel it because if we're going to progress towards God, love, truth, humility, faith and will are the things that put it all together. If we're going to compromise any one of those things for the sake of a personal fear, we're not going to have it altogether when it comes to our relationship with God.

We can't avoid doing those things and expect to still get a relationship with God. God is not going to conform to you. God's not going to somehow modify Her Universe to suit Alan John Miller. God doesn't do that and it doesn't matter who you are, God doesn't do it for you. This makes sense - God created a perfect universe, so if God modified it, then it would no longer be perfect, so God can't do that. God's already created a perfect universe and it's up to us to decide to either conform to the way it works or not. That's our choice. If we don't, there will be certain pains that we will have that are all governed by how much fear that we're willing to experience in the end.

9. The importance of self-examination of our true soul condition

So what I would like to encourage many of you to do is to examine yourselves again. I've encouraged you many times before to examine yourselves, but I want to encourage you to examine yourselves again. Many of you who believe you are going very well are actually doing very badly when it comes to your relationship with God. Many of you don't realise it but actually you're still in the hells of the spirit world, if you pass today. You believe that that's not true, but you would be, primarily because of your fear, because of what you honour - because your god is your fear and that's what you honour.

For many of you, you justify not acting in harmony with love, truth, humility, faith and will to yourself. That's what you do and you can't expect to get closer to God that way. You can't expect to be happier that way if you keep justifying to yourself what's going on. But you do keep doing it. And what I suggest to you is find out why and feel why you want to do that. Feel why. Why do you want to do that?

9.1. The example of single women in the audience (continued)

So for you ladies, who are single, feel why you want to be single, feel it. Really feel it - be honest with yourself about it. How much control you want, how much you want somebody who you believe is perfect. Some of you even know who your soulmates are and you're making no attempt whatsoever to do anything about it, because you don't like them. You don't. Some of you know who they are and you don't like them. How arrogant and condescending is that? Like that's the other half of you and you don't like them? If you don't like what God has created as the other half of you, do you think you're in a better place than that part of you if you don't like them? I don't think so. So you might arrogantly assume that you're much better than he is and you're going to wait until he gets into some kind of condition before you'll engage him, or before you'll do anything about yourself and your own attitudes about the opposite gender. And you look down upon him and you criticise him and you go, "Oh I wish I had another soulmate, any soulmate other than him would be better," and in that moment you have no idea how far away from God you are. [00:37:02.24]

9.2. Being loving and truthful to others

We often also see different things going on here in the group and we go, "People can come for five years and learn about love and still treat people badly in the audience that they're learning about love with." That doesn't make any sense to me. Many of you withdraw from truthful exchanges with people. Do you know what I mean by that? You can feel how much you don't want to engage a certain person. They walk up to you every time and they have to say something to or they try to engage you and you don't want to engage them, and you don't say to them, "Look, I don't want to engage you. And to be frank with you I can see there's an issue of love there, and I can see that I need to work out what it is," and it could be an issue of love in the other person, where you need to discover what it is as to why you don't want to engage them, but let yourself see it for a change. Ask yourself why is it that you can't love all of your brothers and sisters on Earth. Ask yourself why. There's always a reason, usually a fear-based one you need to feel, but it's a good one to find because then you'll release something in the end.

9.3. Embracing the Divine Truth that we have heard

I can't see how the truth can grow on the planet when the people who have heard the truth for the longest period of time are still in huge disagreement with it inside of their souls. Do you know what I mean by that? It's like we're so focused on rebellion with God and God's Laws and the basic five principles of what we're going to need, that it's like we're fighting every step of the way. And how can God's Truth on the planet grow when those of us who have heard it actively decide to work against what we've heard? Can you see? It gets to the point where there needs to be a whole new crop of people who hear Divine Truth for the first time and go, "Yeah, I'm really enthusiastic about that." But sooner or later they're going to hit the same barriers we're in. They're going to hit the same fear constructed barriers and finish up doing what we finish up doing. So how are we going to get through that? We're only going to get through that by choosing to put it all together and focus our whole life on developing these particular things - love, truth, humility, faith and will. That's the only way we're going to be able to do it.

10. Audience discussion about the feedback

So what do you feel about that? And be honest. How many of you know that you feel stagnant? So a lot. What have you blamed? Has it been because AJ and Mary haven't given enough talks on certain subjects? Or it's because AJ's flitting all over the countryside and he can't give me the personal help that I need to grow? What is it that you blame? Is it your partner, they just don't change fast enough? What is it that you blame internally? Have you thought about it?

10.1. An example of a participant who blames herself

**Participant** : I feel I blame myself a lot. I do feel like I see a lot of my limitations in some of those areas that you've talked about today.

Do you feel blaming yourself is loving yourself?

**Participant** : No. It's not.

So can you see that you have obviously an addiction to blaming yourself? So have you given much thought about what that addiction would be?

10.1.1. Blame is a way to avoid emotions

**Participant** : I feel like in blaming myself I can avoid taking responsibility.

I agree.

**Participant** : And I feel like in blaming myself I avoid feeling a lot of my rage.

So you avoid feeling specific emotions that you really don't want to feel.

**Participant** : Yeah.

Okay, I agree.

**Participant** : I feel I've started to take a little bit more responsibility about that. I can avoid really feeling my fears of the truth about myself and my fears about what I won't be able to achieve or...

See I don't know if I agree with this, where you think your fears are. It's like you're blaming yourself for your fears but the reality is you're terrified of other people's opinion. [00:42:52.05]

**Participant** : I am, really.

So that's not afraid of yourself, that's afraid of what other people think of you.

**Participant** : Yes. I agree. I am.

And you are terrified of spirits' opinions of you, which means you're terrified of them and what they'll do if you actually don't blame yourself. See a lot of the times what I feel people finish up doing when they blame themselves, blaming themselves is an avoidance of other issues. Blaming yourself is an avoidance of personal responsibility for example. When you blame yourself, ironically you get to not take responsibility. Blaming yourself also is a way of preventing how you feel about yourself, so in other words preventing shame, preventing those kinds of emotions that make you feel terrible about yourself.

But the main reason why we blame ourselves, as I've talked to you about before, is because we get away from other people blaming us when we blame ourselves. In other words we avoid the attack of other people by blaming ourselves. So that's the addiction. So my suggestion is to look at the addiction of blaming yourself. So I don't feel that blaming yourself is actually so much of an emotion as an addiction to get away from other emotions that you don't feel you can cope with.

10.2. An example of a participant being afraid to speak up in the workplace

**Participant** : Yep. I've noticed lately the terror that comes up, when I want to speak up, or I feel like I want to speak up for myself in an environment where I'm really feeling like nobody else is going to agree with...

So why would you want to speak up in an environment where nobody else agrees?

**Participant** : To challenge that?

Yeah see my preferred option there would be just to walk away from that group of people. So why do you feel you have to stay and speak up rather than just walk away?

**Participant** : I guess at the moment it's because I've got a job and I guess I'm afraid I'm not going to survive if I don't do these things in the world.

Yep. See I feel a lot of these things though get created by other emotions that we're unwilling to feel. See a lot of times what I notice many of you doing speaking up, like you say you're speaking up for truth, many times that's not what I see happening.

What I see happening is you're not understanding that most of the time you're not being loving in that place and you feel like you have to speak up for what they're doing to you. But in fact what's happening is you're already projecting something on them and they're just responding to you. That's what I notice happening a lot.

For example we often get emails from people saying, "What I've worked out is that we need to tell the truth to everyone around us, and be examples of truth." And I go, yeah okay, let's be examples of truth, lets really be examples of truth. If we're really an example of truth, the very first quality we're probably going to display is humility. And if humility is the first quality that we're going to display, then that means that we will feel our own emotions before we'll try to address somebody else's. It won't be the other way around. And what I notice many of you doing is addressing the other people's emotion before you've even felt your own. To me that's not a mark of humility, that's not telling the truth. Telling the truth would be, be humble first, feel your own emotion first and then if there is still something to correct, maybe correct it in a more public setting or directly with the individual.

But the question also has to be asked if they're not asking you for assistance and they don't want assistance in their heart, and if you can leave them, then just leave them. Why aren't you leaving them? If you're in a job and you know you have to have the job for whatever reason, then why aren't you doing the best things you possibly can to conform to everything the person wants? See to me having a job means, for example if I were a window cleaner and I was working for somebody, and they told me to climb on a big ladder to window clean, I would look at the safest way I could climb up the window and do the window. I wouldn't complain about that it's unsafe and I wouldn't do all these other things, I would want to serve. Many of us don't want to serve unless we get something in return.

**Participant** : Yeah, I feel like that there is a lot in this job that I really feel is loving and the whole focus is a loving focus. I guess in the sense of speaking up for myself it's in an environment where I'm encouraged to, but I can feel my terror of their opinion of me I guess, when I do speak just what I want. I'm being asked to say it.

This is what I'm saying to you - one of your primary fears is your fear of other people's opinion. And that's certainly a fear that you definitely have and I feel that many here have it. This is one reason why we don't tell the truth when we're asked the truth. We still don't tell it because we're afraid of other people's opinions. Yep. But that's not the same as forcing your opinion on another person, is it? And there are many of you who want to force your opinion on other people and that's not a loving course of action actually, that's a demand being placed on another person. [00:49:06.07]

10.3. A lack of humility in audience members

So the question I asked was what do you feel about these issues that I'm raising with you? What do you feel is going on for you inside of these issues. So for you ladies who are struggling with feeling like you really do want a relationship, what I feel from many of you is that you want a relationship but you want it all on your terms, the whole lot of it. You want everything to be exactly how you want it to be. You want him to look a certain way, be a certain height, be a certain size, have a certain youthful type of vigour, depending on your own and you want him to be safe and secure, you want him to be financially safe and secure, and you want him to be sound and it's like - are you all of these things? Are you? But you want them to be all these things. Why is that? Like what's going on there? Isn't it that you're unwilling to see your own self and yet you believe somehow that you deserve this. Like I don't know, what's going on for you? What do you feel?

What I think is happening for many of us is that we have a very, very false sense of ourselves. And that's what I feel is our primary issue is - a lack of humility in other words; remember part of humility is seeing yourself as God sees you, not as you want to be seen, not as you believe you should be seen, but as God actually sees you. Now if you do that, I feel you will see very many things about yourself that you can change; but I feel many of you are terrified of seeing yourself as God sees you and I don't really understand that given the fact that God already sees it. It's not like you're going to protect yourself from God in some way by coming to see how God sees you. God already sees these things inside of you and God is waiting for you to see these things yourself. So if God already sees the way you are, then surely it would make sense for you to want to see yourself in the same manner rather than trying to protect yourself from all of that.

11. God created our souls in a pristine state

**Participant** : I was just reflecting on what you were saying about wanting to see myself the way God sees me and since I've started on this path I've discovered a lot of things about myself that I didn't know that are not very nice. And when you talk about the fear that we're not willing to engage...

Can I just stop you for a second though? When you say you see a lot of things about yourself that are not very nice, can I just correct that viewpoint? Because when you say that you're basically saying that you believe that all of those things that you see that are not nice are a part of your soul. In other words you believe they are a part of your character and nature, don't you?

**Participant** : Yeah.

That is completely incorrect from God's Perspective. They're not a part of your character and nature. They're the mud that's been thrown at you that you've now acted upon. They're not a part of your character and nature. The reality is that all of those things that are like a cake on your soul, that you don't like, that are all dirty parts, what you see as dirty parts of your own soul, they're not parts of your own soul. God didn't create them; people around you and your own choices created them.

**Participant** : But it feels like that's all that I am.

I know but that's an error. See if you had faith that God created your soul, you would not believe that error. And therefore you'd be willing to feel those emotions to release them. And when you release them you'd no longer believe this.

You see this is the problem, you don't have faith that God created a pristine soul, which is what you really are inside and there's all this mud that's caked around the outside of the pristine soul - all this black stuff that's carried around the outside of this pristine soul. And you are now looking at that in the mirror and going, "That's me." It's not you. It's stuff that can come out of you. And this false belief that it's you, which you want to hold onto, stops you from letting it go.

God created our soul as pristine, but the emotional injuries we have are like mud covering the pristine soul

**Participant** : And I feel that that's what stops me from wanting to see how God sees me because I'm scared that God only sees the false belief that I hold on to.

Exactly. The problem is you're only seeing the injuries, but God sees all of you; God sees the beautiful pristine parts that God created too. And part of what God wants you to face is the truth that God created all these beautiful parts too, that you're not seeing. You don't want to face that because all you see when you look in the mirror is all these muddy bits that are caking the soul and then you judge that as you, you think it's you. It's not you; it's just the mud that's on you. [00:55:04.24]

11.1. An analogy of having mud on our body

Let me put it another way, and use another analogy for you. If I got you and rolled you in the mud - our clay on our dam is pretty muddy, you'd come up and you'd be caked with the stuff, it would be everywhere. In your ears, in your nose, in your eyes, in your mouth, your body would be caked with it and if you had clothes on you wouldn't even see them half the time because there'd be so much mud. That's how much mud there is in the dam. So when you go now and look in the mirror, do you go, "Wow, you're now so disgusting, you shouldn't ever have a wash."

**Participant** : (Laughs) No.

What do you do? You go wow, you're looking pretty disgusting at the moment, you need to have a wash, don't you? Isn't that what you do? And you're confident aren't you in that place that when you have a wash, that the majority, if not all of that mud that you now have all over you will be gone, are you not?

**Participant** : Yep.

So why don't you have that same confidence when it comes to your own emotions? It's because you don't have faith in that process. And you need to ask for faith and develop faith in that process, by experiencing it. For the majority of people, we're looking at all of this mud, we're calling it ourselves and then we decide we're not going to let it go because we don't believe we're able. And God's trying to say to you, "Nat, Nat, Nat, just face the truth for a bit. This mud that's on you, I didn't put it there. I created your soul, and I put no mud on it. You and other people have gone and rolled around in the mud. That's what's happened. Now you can have a wash or you can stay muddy the rest of your life. What do you choose?"

**Participant** : I'd like to have a wash.

Now obviously it would make sense to choose to have a wash. But interestingly enough physically we will choose to have a wash, but emotionally, what do we choose? We choose to leave it all on there. And not only do we choose to leave it all on there but we look at it in the mirror and say, "Now you're a terribly muddy person." And then the next day, "You're a terribly muddy person and it's getting worse." And the next day, "it's terrible". This is the person you've become, that's what you believe. It's not true, it's not true. This is the person that has got mud all over them that can be washed off and there's only one way, God's Way, of washing it all off. But it involves you exercising your will in harmony with some faith in God, in harmony with the belief that love will cure all things and wanting to know the truth about what's there.

It's like if you don't know there's mud in your ear, do you think you're going to get something and clean it out? No you'll leave it in and somebody will come along, "You didn't wash yourself very well, there's still mud in your ear." Someone will tell you the truth. And we're not even reliant upon that, because God's Universe is all constructed in the manner to allow ourselves to see the complete truth about what is going on.

So we need to understand from God's Perspective, God created a pristine soul. Any mud that's on our soul is a result of not only what has happened to us in the past, but very much primarily a result of our personal choices. Now we can wash that mud off, through a process, just like you can physically wash the mud off your body through a process, but it's going to involve you taking some personal effort.

The problem is when you believe that you are not the pristine soul and you believe that the mud surrounding your soul is a part of you; you then get away with making no effort. So it's almost a way to go into this self-delusional place where we believe it's useless making an effort. And to be honest, a lot of us like that. Because we don't want to make an effort, a lot of us don't want to make one. So we like that. We like making the excuse that it's a part of us rather than just making an effort to go and have a shower, from God's Perspective, and release this emotional baggage that we have that will make us clean. [00:59:47.10]

11.2. Emotional injuries enter our soul but are not our pristine self

**Participant** : I've had this understanding that the soul was like your emotions, your feelings, your errors and this is kind of something different that you're saying.

Well no, I'm saying that when these emotions hit us, they do enter us of course but they're not a part of our pristine self. They've become a part of us but they're not out real self, we can release them. The reality from a logical perspective is this - if something has entered us it makes sense that the same thing can also be released from us. From a logical perspective that makes sense.

So if we look at it from an emotional perspective, let's say the emotion of anger towards men has entered us, which is an emotion you feel, you have the ability to release it, because the fact that it entered you means that you also have the ability to release it.

The soul is able to release emotional injuries that have entered it

There are certain things that you are not going to be able to change inside of you that God created. So God created some things about your personality for example, that you are never going to be able to change. In fact you'll get to the point where you'll want to grow them; you'll want to expand them. They're some of those things you can't change. But a lot of the things we believe are our personality, are not our personality.

Aspects of the soul that God created, such as personality, cannot be released

For instance if you believe your personality is that you don't like men very much, that's not a personality. That's an emotion that's entered your soul and can be released. This is why I like to liken it as mud on the outside of your soul and you just have a wash.

Remember when I give illustrations, and I'm not talking about actual reality, I'm talking about the illustration that is we've got the mud around our soul, it got there, it can be washed off. And this is the case with all of our negative belief systems. All of our negative emotions, all of our lack of love that exists within us, can all be washed off. The whole lot can leave us but it's only going to leave us by our use of our will.

11.3. Only we can control the state of our soul through the use of our will

I am the only person who has control over my own soul. So if that's my soul, whatever is in it right now, I am the only person who can choose to make the choice of releasing whatever it is, to having the wash if you like. I'm the only person who can do it. It's only by the use of my will that it's going to happen. God's not going to come along, wave some magical wand and go, "Okay you're now all clean," and you didn't have to do anything. God's not going to do that, and never will in fact.

There's no blood sacrifice. What a lot us really want is a blood sacrifice. Do you know what I mean by a blood sacrifice? It is this Christian belief that Jesus died for your sins, and so none of you need to worry about your sins anymore because all you have to do is believe that Jesus died for your sins and all of your sins are all washed away as a result. The reality is many of you want to believe that. Why would we want to believe that? Because we don't want to have to use our own will to take some kind of action in order to release what's there. That's why we believe it. That's why we want it.

Once we come to understand God's Truth, we come to understand, no, actually God's Truth is that every single one of us is individually responsible for ourselves. We are individually responsible for every single thing we choose to do. In fact we are individually responsible for the retention of every emotion within our soul. We're not individually responsible necessarily for its creation, because it might have been created by events that have occurred around us. But now that it's in us, we are responsible for its retention; we are responsible for it staying within us. And if we want it out of us, we are going to have to take some choice or decision that's different. That's the reality; we're going to have to make a different choice. [01:04:21.09]

12. Closing words

So what I would like to encourage each of you to do is, if you feel like discussing this more tomorrow, in "Relationship with God - Putting It Together Session 2" think about what you would like to ask about these matters, in terms of living your life in harmony with these particular principles in order to develop your relationship with God further. And ask the questions tomorrow that you would like to ask about how that can be improved. You could even ask how you think you're going, how you feel things are going for you personally in terms of some of these things; you can ask those questions too if you're brave enough to do it and actually have it recorded.

Mary and I have decided we are not going to do any more seminars here in Murgon for some time to come. The main reason why we've decided it is because we feel that the majority of the people who are here are still using the seminars as a way to come to something but not to actually deal with the actual issues that are raised during them. So we would like to see you all become more personally responsible for your own relationship with God. We feel the problem is the more that we have interactions with you that bear little or no fruitage; more what we're doing is supporting some of these addictions that you're unwilling to go through. Many of you need to get angry. Many of you need to feel your fears more. Many of you need to address some of your grief more. Many of you need to be more honest about how you truly feel about your neighbour. You need to have all of these things occurring.

We don't feel that having more information presented to you is going to help you do that. We feel we have already presented enough information about all of those things. In fact we feel that we've presented so much information that some of you are overwhelmed with information without applying it. You get to a point where you just go, "I'm in saturation now, I can't handle any more, I can't hear any more, I can't act on any more," and those kinds of things. A lot of times that is driven by fear as well. And what we would like to see is if you want a seminar here in the future, that you start working your way through some of these particular issues. What we feel for many of you is there is a strong need for you to examine your fears, and to be far more honest with yourself. [01:07:05.14]

12.1. Spirit influence towards audience members

Can I say to you today though that you've been very disengaged today as an audience, have you noticed that? There's a very heavy spirit influence on you as an audience. There's a strong feeling of wanting to avoid, that we've been feeling, which is the reason why we feel we can't do any more seminars here - because we've been feeling that now for the last three or four seminars here.

We feel that many of you are under heavy spirit influence because you're unwilling to address some addictions that you have. You're getting under more and more heavy spirit influence. And to be frank with you, we feel many of you over the next six months, if you don't do something about it, will find that you don't want anything to do with Divine Truth anymore. That's what we feel will happen for many.

So we would encourage you to go back over some of the information we've presented about spirits and their influence, such as "Spirit Relationships - Positively Responding to Spirit Influence", and work through some of the addictions that cause these influences to occur. We've just done a series of FAQ's on spirits as well, just to assist you in that regard, to work your way through what's going on from a spirit influence perspective.

There are now organised groups of spirits in the spirit world who specifically attack any person who wishes to find or have anything to do with Divine Truth. So they're just going around, and every new person gets attacked by these spirits almost immediately, as soon as they find Divine Truth. That is a big issue that many of us face and for those of us who have been listening for a long time, and finding ourselves quite stagnant; the more you stagnate, the harder you're going to find your life.

12.2. Trusting God

So my suggestion to you is to have some trust in God, trust in love, trust in using your will, have some faith, have some humility and work though the issues that you're stagnant on, rather than holding on to them. Because the more you hold on to them, the harder this is going to get for you. If you release them, it doesn't get hard; it only gets hard when you hold on to them. So let yourself release; let yourself go through the process. Let yourself go through the process even though other people might not agree with it. Allow yourself to do those things.

Can I suggest just trust God more: trust God more. Because honestly what we notice is the people who are enthusiastically trusting God, trusting the process, their lives are changing very rapidly and they are having a lot more joy in their life. Notice those people amongst the group and ask them what are they doing? What's going on for you? Why is that happening for you? Ask them questions about that. Because there are some people that are doing that and they'll be able to help you through this process of feeling stagnant and feeling down and feeling oppressed, which are all feelings that many of you are feeling. You're feeling oppressed and down and under the weather and my suggestion is a lot of that is because we're unwilling to feel certain addictions that we have, and if you can allow yourself to release them that would be fantastic: so that's what we'd encourage you to do.

Thanks for your time today, guys.

12.3. AJ explains his motivation for the feedback

**Participant** : I just wanted to really say thank you to you Jesus and Mary. I'm sure I'm not alone in saying that even though you feel that we're stagnating or whatever, I feel personally excited.

Yeah don't misinterpret my talk with you today though Monique. I'm not judgemental about where you're at, I can just see many of you in a lot of personal distress now, and what I'm trying to do is point out the reasons why. Because obviously when we see you in this personal distress we feel for you. We feel concern for your situation, we understand that many times it's because of the choices you're making as to why you're in the places you're in, and so that's why we're willing to be straightforward and honest with you about those choices that you're making. But please don't view it as judgement because that's not how we feel. Mary and I feel that we want to help you to get out of this place where you're constantly trying to feed your fears, and into the place where you honour these primary facets of your day-to-day interaction with God. [01:20:20.22]

So if all of you can remember that - we're not here to berate you or to make you feel bad or worse about yourself than you already feel. What we're trying to do is show you where the problem is. And for many of us, the problem is we're not honest with ourselves or we're not humble or we don't have faith or we're using our will out of harmony with love and we don't really want to love. That is our problem, and what we're trying to do is show you where the problems are.

If you have a problem with your relationship with God stagnating, it's always because of one of these things - love, truth, humility, faith or will. There's no other reason. It's always because of one of these things being exercised out of harmony with the way in which God has created her universal laws. And all we want to do is expose that to you so that you have a choice to either work on it or not. It's up to you as to what you do.

We would love to see you work on it because then you'll make changes and honestly the reality is; the way to measure whether something is really happening is the amount of large changes that are occurring in your life in terms of how other people see you and how other people are drawn to you. That's how you can measure a lot of change. So please don't interpret it as feeling like we feel you're stagnant and you've got to change, because that's not it.

**Participant** : No I feel pretty excited to be honest that after three and a half years of, "Oh this is what truth is about," and I just felt that this morning that wow I didn't get that for three and a half years. How there can be joy and there can be excitement and man, I missed that one. And God's Love, that was only a recent thing. It's about love, this path? I missed that one. And I don't have to push myself into emotion, humility, as I did for years and years and then it's like there's a bit of excitement there, it's not a chore. But as soon as the faith goes down, it's like whoa, there's darkness, there's spirits and everything turns black again. But it's pretty cool.

Exactly. And we feel too, what you're going through as a group, pretty much everyone after two or three years initially is going to finish up going through as individuals because that's the way it is. Most of the time we have a whole fiction about our life and ourselves and our real emotions and all those kind of things that have to be exposed somehow; and sooner or later they get exposed - God's beautiful like that. God always exposes anything that's out of harmony with love and out of harmony with our growth.

So the only reason why we give these kinds of talks, we are a bit firmer about some things about how things really are, is because we want you to be able to see what's going on for you. That's all. And not because we feel like you've got to change or you have to change or any of those other things - we'd just like to show you why you're in distress and what's going on really. And I feel that if you can look at those things more sincerely, you will be relieved of a lot of the distress that you feel as a result and you'll feel some positive feeling of working forward from that.

**Participant** : Thank you.

But thanks for the appreciation. (Applause) Thanks, guys.

Putting It All Together: Session 2 Part 1

13. Introduction

The subject is "Relationship With God - Putting It All Together". We're discussing of course the five primary things that we need to do to put it all together.

What we'd like to do today is talk with you about personal questions or general questions that you have on that topic, about your personal experience, and what kind of assistance that you might need in order to put it all together.

14. An example of a participant not desiring truth

**Participant** : I'm in that cage and it seems to be getting smaller. I'm rattling around, just feeling a bit of this and a bit of that, and not really getting a long way. I've recognised that. I think I'm willing to accept more truth about myself and to grow my humility and to just - well I want help with what's the biggest thing I'm not seeing, what's the biggest thing that's going to help me break down that cage?

Well I feel for yourself, Joy, the first thing is you're not as willing to accept more truth as you believe and I feel the fair majority of the audience is in the same boat, actually. We believe we want more truth but the way God delivers truth is through the Law of Attraction, as you know.

The Law of Attraction is showing you things every single moment of every single day. And of course when we're not at-one with God, there are always lots of things that it's actually showing us. There are things that animals do in their reaction to ourselves, that people do in reaction to ourselves, accidents that we have - just physical even small accidents, like when you're cutting up the vegetables and you slip and stab yourself with the knife. These are all Law of Attraction events telling you what is going on. The majority of us have no desire whatsoever to know what they're about. And so what we do is we skip over them. Now every time we skip over a Law of Attraction event it's because we don't want to know the truth. That's the reason why we're doing it.

So what we need to do first is focus on the fact that the truth is the thing that will set us free from the prison that we've created for ourselves - only the truth in fact. And if you think of the prison, the prison is the fear, and the truth is the only thing that exposes fear and reduces fear.

So we have to then assume that if that's not occurring, our fear is dictating to us the truth. What we believe the truth to be is actually determined by our fear, not by the actual truth from God's Perspective. And what's actually happening is that we are very resistive to receiving truth and that's what causes the restriction of our internal life and freedoms. That's the thing.

All of us have the capacity to receive information from God without having to talk to another person. That's a fact. So you don't need to go to someone who knows more than you do and actually find out from them what your problems are, although many times those people would be willing to tell you.

Frankly many of you have come to us in the past and asked what your problems are, we tell you, and all we feel from you is resistance, which means that you didn't really want the truth. In fact a lot of times we feel a desire to argue, constantly, about what is being presented to you. And yet many times myself and Mary are actually presenting to you the very next thing you need to address if you're ever going to progress. And for some of you we presented that to you five years ago and you haven't progressed since then. Actually many of you in fact are in that boat where five years ago you had a conversation with us thinking that you wanted to know some truth, we told you some truth, you didn't agree with it and you've been stuck on that issue for five years. And that's often been the case for many of you. [00:05:15.01]

Remember the doorway to the truth is humility. In other words we have to want to know the truth before the truth will be exposed to us. The truth is always being presented to us, but it's whether we want to know it or not in the moment that will determine whether we receive it. For the majority of us we don't want to know it in the moment. So we wait for a person who we respect to tell us the truth. God is the person you should respect the most and God's Laws are the means by which we get told the truth constantly, and if we truly respected God we would be watching every single thing that's happening in our day-to-day life, brought to us through the Law of Attraction, and that would be the constant message that's coming to us about what's really, really going on.

But most of us ignore that, and then we think we still want the truth. So we go and ask people that we respect, and they might be more clueless than we are in fact. In fact many times I see many of you doing that with other people - going and asking a person who you respect but the reality is they have the same injury or a worse injury than you do. So how are they ever going to help you grow if they have the same or a worse injury that you have yourself? You can't see it because you can't see your own injury. You can't see somebody else's when you can't see your own. So there is this problem with truth constantly.

14.1. God's Law of Attraction constantly brings us truth

Now the real question then becomes how do I address all those problems? Well the first thing of course as we've pointed out is the Law of Attraction - that's God's Messenger of Truth when all other messengers of truth fail. In other words that is the constant message of truth coming to you - constantly, every single moment. The majority of us ignore it, or completely dismiss it, or we try to get away from it, or we're constantly trying to manipulate it. The way we do that is we arrange our life so that we don't have to cope with our own attractions.

So for example you get an email from a nasty person, the majority of us would then just go, block, that's done. I'm never going to get an email from that person again. However you're not considering that you attracted it, and there's something going on in the attraction. Do you think that by blocking it and just shutting it away and turning it off, that you're going to change anything? Definitely not. You're going to continue attracting it and because you've blocked that very, very minor way of someone attacking you, what happens? The Law of Attraction ramps up and now you get it face to face, instead of just by an email. [00:08:32.20]

And then because you've blocked that and say I'm never going to see that person again, what happens is someone gets in your face in a forced situation and actually attacks you, and you can't get out of it anymore. This is what you're going to attract because it ramps up every single time. And what we finish up doing is we ignore the Law of Attraction with all the little things, and because we ignore it with the little things the bigger things have to happen.

So for many of you this is what's going on in your life now is the bigger things are happening, because you've ignored all the little things that were happening up until now that were showing you a certain thing. You've ignored all of those and so bigger things are happening. And you go, "Man, I thought I was progressing, but I'm attracting worse things." Well of course you're attracting worse things if you've ignored the previous things - this is the law. The law is going to do its work.

The reason why God created the law like this is that God wants to lead you to love. Every time you ignore the Law of Attraction what you're doing is you're in fact ignoring love. Many of you hate the Law of Attraction because when something bad happens many of you go, "Oh this terrible thing happened to me", or, "That person's a bastard and this person's this and this person's a bitch and she did this or that..." When you're raving on about all those things you're ignoring one factor, and that is that you are the common person in your life. In your life, you're the person who is the person who is present all the time. So therefore it's your attraction of what's going on right in that moment. You're ignoring that and in that moment what you're doing is you're basically trying to blame other people for what you are attracting into your personal life. That's the first problem we have with our humility. The first problem is the Law of Attraction showing us things, even tiny little things. Perhaps we can give some illustrations.

14.1.1. An example of AJ's passionfruit vine being eaten

Very little goes past myself and Mary's notice at home. Before we went away Mary and I were still sleeping apart - we'd been sleeping apart for some time. I've got this lovely bush outside the back of my tent. The bush was really lush, it was beautiful – there was a passionfruit vine and it was lush with leaves bigger than my hand. It was dark green, it was healthy and everything was beautiful about it. And I'm saying to Mary, "That passionfruit vine is looking real good," and gave it some water or whatever. Anyway we go away for two weeks, we come back home and the entire vine has disappeared. All that's left are these few straggly bits coming out. Possums and kangaroos ate the whole thing while we were away - the whole thing. Now they didn't eat it while I was there, they only ate it while I was away. And this is while we were away in England. The very first thing I noticed - it's all eaten.

I know that it's my stuff because we were feeling quite attacked at different times while we were away, by spirits and by other people and we could feel our own openness to the attack. In that place I knew that because I was open to the attack, there's the reason why those animals could now totally decimate what was very, very healthy before then. Now while we were home, before we went away, that didn't happen and the reason why is because I didn't feel that way. I felt like everything was pretty solid inside of myself, I wasn't open to attack and so everything was working fine.

Now the average person would look at that thing and said, "Oh I should of put a guard on it," or being really upset about the possums and shoot a few possums and shoot a few kangaroos to get rid of the problem. That's what the average person would do. In other words what we do is we externalise the problem, we actually blame the environment for the problem that our soul created. We don't do that at home, we feel what's going on in ourselves. [00:12:50.07]

Do you want to bring up an example for yourself? Like that was my example for me.

**Mary** : That was your example. I can't think of an example now. Just with every interaction that I have in a day; I'm always looking at what in me is attracting it.

14.1.2. An example of Mary hurting herself when cooking

Can I bring up an example that is a common one for you?

**Mary** : Yes please.

When you're cooking, very frequently you burn yourself or cut yourself.

**Mary** : Always on my left side.

Always on the left side.

**Mary** : If I hurt my leg it's my right one ... But that's just reflecting to me a lot of self-attacking emotions that I still am working through and a lot of feelings about being hard on myself. I did it again this morning as I was making brekkie. (Laughs)

Cutting up fruit.

**Mary** : Yeah it was on the blender and that's something that very often happens to me.

So just little events like that, if you notice little events and feel about them, then the bigger events don't happen. And so the bigger the events that are happening in your personal life, it means that you've ignored all the little ones.

**Mary** : I feel that God is always giving us opportunities to deal with the little events. Very often we're used to controlling our environment or our life so we don't have to face what gets presented to us. It is right there, someone says, "Hey I'd like to catch up with you," and you think yeah, I don't really feel comfortable in that person's company so I am just going to make an excuse and say how I've got something else on that day, which is telling a lie, and it's also avoiding what you've attracted. And because of that then, as AJ's saying, you're going to have to attract something else that's going to confront that resistance within you. So I've really had a change in my outlook in terms of what God is trying to show me and teach me and I'm noticing if I take up those things, growth happens. Even if you don't deal with everything within you that created the attraction, you've at least started to grow some awareness about it or you've at least started to see some truth about yourself if you go into it with the desire to do that rather than the desire to control and manipulate what's happening around you.

14.2. Tying the five basics required for progression towards God with the Law of Attraction

So if we look at these five primary things, and then look at just the Law of Attraction, in terms of our attitude towards the Law of Attraction, for the majority of us, our attitude toward the Law of Attraction is that we're using our will to try to avoid it most of the time.

Now if you really honoured the Law of Attraction from God's Perspective, you would never use your will to avoid your Law of Attraction. You would only take actions based on desire, and whenever anything that you didn't desire did happen, you'd see it as a Law of Attraction event and you wouldn't be trying to avoid your fear by manipulating this law, or attempting to, because it can't be manipulated. All of God's Laws can't be manipulated.

Or what we attempt to do is we go, "Okay I'm not going to go out because every time I go out, somebody treats me badly, so I'm going to stay home." Well someone will treat you badly at home then. And then you decide well I want no one else in my life so I'm going to just be a hermit. And then you'll have animals treating you badly. The Law of Attraction is going to work every single time, and if you're using your will to manipulate it or try to avoid it, then you are not honouring this beautiful loving law. You're not honouring the truth of God's Laws. You're not honouring it from - the use of your will. [00:16:26.16]

With regard to faith, you don't have any faith in it. In other words you don't have faith that if you address the soul-based emotional injury that creates the attraction that everything will change. Now many of you have gained some faith through past experience that that happens because you've had some events where you've faced up to them and then all of a sudden something changes.

14.2.1. An example of a woman who falsely declared an insurance claim

A few people came up to us yesterday and one lady said to us that she had falsely declared an insurance claim twenty years ago. Then she realised that that was wrong and so what she did was she wrote to the insurance company about her false claim, realising that she might even potentially get put in gaol for the claim. According to the policies, that's what can happen. She wrote to them and she gave them back the money she claimed, plus interest, for twenty years. Now they of course had never received a letter like that. So you know what they did with that? They rang her up and said we have never received a letter like that. Ever. It's amazing so we're going to give you all the money back. (Laughter) So they gave her all the money back.

Now that's an example of how things can change when you deal with some things. Now there was a lot of fear that had to come up in that process, a lot of desire to live in harmony with truth that had to come up in that process and act upon what she knew was truthful inside of herself. And when that happened then this beautiful law attracts some positive events. This is the beauty of this law. You have the negative events attracted but if you act in harmony with the laws, now through that there's some faith built in the Law of Attraction that it's not just all bad, but these beautiful things can happen if you act in harmony with the law.

14.2.2. Embracing the Law of Attraction

**Mary** : If I can add to that on the subject of faith, when we start to receive the smaller Law of Attraction events and work with God with them and say, "Okay God's a Loving God who's actually tried to show me an error within me, I'll embrace this opportunity even though it might feel a bit scary or a bit painful," we begin to see that God doesn't have this hideous law that's there to traumatise us with terrible events.

Which is the way most of us do believe the law is set up.

**Mary** : It's actually, wow, when I really desire to participate in my growth, God brings me very gentle events that I can actually begin to grow and change with and I don't end up ever attracting what are seemingly harsh events because I'm already an active participant. So we begin to have more faith that God's actually a loving God as well and that God's Laws are loving.

So can you see just by engaging this law in a different way you then build faith in a number of things? Firstly faith in the law itself, faith that God is actually got a loving motive for actually creating this law and so forth. This is stuff that builds in you when you engage it. Every time you avoid the law or try to manipulate it in order to avoid something, you are not honouring those things. You're not honouring your will or your faith. You're also not demonstrating any humility because it's your soul that attracted the event - your soul. Nobody else's: your soul attracted the event. And yet most of the time we say, "Oh that person did this and this person did that and that animal did this and we should have done that." We come up with all these external reasons why we should stop the results of the law and that is our lack of humility in play, that's telling us how little humility we have in that moment. [00:20:25.05]

**Mary** : Or we self-punish. We go, "Oh I keep attracting these terrible things, oh that's terrible, that's my condition. It's all horrible and God's trying to tell me that actually I'm full of error." Sometimes that's not what God's actually trying to show you. Sometimes there are really positive things. What I've found is that engaging my attractions with the media that I talked to you guys about last time, I found that actually, yep God's helping me with my fear but also with my passion. I love Divine Truth, I want to talk to other people about it and all this fear has been stopping me for years and actually I'm embracing what's coming towards me and I'm getting more passionate and more joy in my life. So often we have to be humble.

Even in events where before you were completely afraid of.

**Mary** : Yeah and thought that they were traumatic and horrible. With exactly the same event and now I feel like, "Oh that was quite enjoyable, I learnt something about myself." So there's humility to the error in love but also the willingness to just feel through the stuff that comes up without analysing it too much, without going, "What is God trying to teach me?" just to feel the feeling that's there.

Feel what you feel in that moment. What the Law of Attraction is bringing you in that moment is probably related to the feeling you're feeling right at that moment. Of course that makes sense but for most of us what we go is, "What's that about? I don't know what that's about." What are you feeling like at the moment? That's the fastest way to find out what it's about.

The other thing that we're not doing with the law itself is honouring the truth about it. God's Truth is that this law is a perfect, loving law created to help you grow towards love and truth and towards God. Even if you're not growing towards God it helps you grow towards love and truth. And when you engage this law you're going to have the most possible benefits that you can possibly have. It's the messenger of truth in fact.

We're not honouring the truth at all when we try to avoid the law; when we try to manipulate it, when we try to get away from things, when we don't do things because we're afraid, when we manage our life, when we arrange our life to avoid discomfort, all of these things that the majority of us do every single day.

In the Western world we do it more than anywhere else. If you're in the middle of Africa and you're living in a hut that's made out of sticks and the rain comes and it's dripping everywhere, you can't avoid certain things about the law. But here we can build a roof over the top that's made of tin and avoid all the drips. Yet our soul may still have the same attraction but we've just created a comfort to avoid the law, that's all we do. And this is what we do most of the time. In the Western world we do it more than anyone else. So in this regard, we have less respect for the law than most other people in other countries that don't have those means to avoid the law.

And then if we look at love with the Law of Attraction, as we've pointed out it's a loving law. Most of the time with the Law of Attraction we forget that God loves us. We think that the law is really hard and harsh and terrible and we actually imply to God that you're hard and harsh and terrible because I'm getting this hard and harsh law doing certain things to me. And also we don't have any love of ourselves honouring that we created the events, whether they're positive or negative, we can at least honour that we are a very powerful creator.

Like when you think about it, if you create total devastation financially and you're destitute completely, you're a powerful creator. That's pretty hard in the Western world to create that. So you're a very powerful creator and sure your soul's creating powerfully in what you view as a negative direction, but at least you can honour the fact that these are your creations; these are your emotions that are creating these things. Now someone in the third world is going to struggle to honour that because of course they have oppression and all these other things that are often the cause of their lack of financial stability. But here we don't have these things, so here we can say pretty much we are primarily the personal creator of our own lack of financial welfare. Really, that's the truth. [00:25:03.19]

And yet we go, "Oh this happened and that happened and the government wanted this from me and the people wanted that from me and so I had to declare bankruptcy and I had to go through all that process," and all of it is an avoidance of what the law is bringing you and also a lack of love for yourself. Because if you truly loved yourself you'd go, "I honour the fact that I've created all of these things, it must be something pretty powerful in my soul to create that because the average person doesn't create that. So it must be something pretty powerful in my soul. If I get to that and release that from my soul, I won't create it anymore." Now that's pretty good knowledge, isn't it - that you know that your life can change if you change something. And all you need to do is feel the feelings that you go through while you're feeling destitute. That will help you work through what's going on, what's happening.

So can you see even with the Law of Attraction, just the one law that brings you the truth, the majority of us are exercising our will in the opposite direction. We have no faith in it, we don't have any humility with what it brings to us, we don't want to know the truth of what it's telling us and most importantly, we have no love of self or love of anyone else when we look at the law. And we constantly project outwards saying, "You did the problem to me," and we're constantly projecting to God saying, "Why did you make this crumby law?"

**Participant** : I've just realised that I've been using my will in a very self-reliant way, thinking that I'm seeking more truth and humility and totally ignoring God's Way, which is the Law of Attraction.

Exactly. The Law of Attraction is a beautiful law designed primarily to help you. When nobody else can help you, this law is always helping you. That's the beauty. So even when God cannot ask a spirit guide of yours to communicate to you what the problem is of what's going on, when you can't communicate with your guide, when you don't have a friend who's in a better condition than you to tell you what's happening, you don't have somebody who notices ... well most of our friends do know what's going on for us but most of them are not good enough friends to tell us the truth because they're so afraid of losing our friendship or what we might do in reaction to the friendship. So for the majority of times the Law of Attraction is our friendliest way of finding out the truth, and it's God's Way of finding out the truth. We all can engage it, we all have the same attractions, and we all have a soul that engages this law. Yet the majority of us ignore it completely.

So there's our first problem. Our first problem when we look at that law is we have no will, no faith, no humility, no truth and no love. Can you see if we focus on the development of these things – love, truth, humility, faith and will in everything that we are linked to then automatically our outlook on it all changes?

14.3. The Law of Cause and Effect shows us truth about our life

Now what's another law, and this is a part of the Law of Attraction, that will help you find out the truth about your life?

**Participant** : Cause and effect.

Cause and effect. So there's another law called the Law of Cause and Effect. And what is that law basically saying? Everything that's happened in my life today has got a cause that happened sometime prior to today, or sometime prior to this very moment, because there had to be something that caused this effect. That's what it's saying. And if I can find out the cause, and get rid of it, then the effect will also disappear. Is that powerful to know that? It's a powerful thing to know.

So what do the majority of us do with that? We say that's a heap of rubbish. And we use our will to change the effect. Many of you are doing this moment-by-moment during your day. You're using your will to change the effect of something that caused that effect. Now of course when you do that, you're going to have to do the same thing tomorrow, and the next day, the next day, the next day and after a while it becomes so habitual that you think it's normal.

Do you think a person that's in the Celestial spheres would do the same thing? Do you think a person in the Celestial spheres would go and put a whole heap of tree guards around all the trees? No. But we're still constantly doing it.

14.3.1. An example of Mary ordering food in restaurants

**Mary** : I have a good example that I do all the time. When we go anywhere and eat out, we order food, which has been happening quite a lot because we've been travelling quite a lot. Whatever AJ orders, it comes in a timely manner, it's delicious, it's wonderful. Whatever I order, usually sometimes there's an issue with it. Often it comes late or they get it wrong because I don't want dairy and I don't want all these things in it. The cause within me for this effect is about me feeling like I'm allowed to have my desires without shame, or feeling that I'm not being greedy by just having what I want and also my fears of people not hearing me. I feel like people aren't really interested in what I say, so when I say things people aren't really interested in what I say. So my way to get over this effect is to then say, "Excuse me, I just ordered this and it hasn't come, or this is wrong, or ..." Instead of just sitting with the fact that there's my soul again, I just attracted the wrong order or a late order or somebody completely ignoring my order.

I have to have a really bad day for that to happen generally now. (Laughs) But as you know, I have described to you before that when that has happened in the past, I've sometimes cried for a couple of hours and dealt with that emotionally.

**Mary** : I've also had to resist the temptation to avoid the effect by just, "I'll have what he's having." (Laughter) Because it works!

She does that quite frequently, when she's particularly suspicious in particular, don't you?

14.3.2. Focusing on the cause rather than the effect

So if we truly honoured the real cause, which is something that's going on in the soul and if we really want to get rid of the real cause of any negative event, then of course we need to focus on the cause, and not the effect. But most of us are focusing on the effect and not the cause.

So what do we do when we get sick? We focus on the effect, not the cause. What do we do when we get a disease? We focus on the effect and not the cause. What do we do when something happens around our house that we're not happy with? We focus on the effect and not the cause. And most of us are doing this moment-by-moment every single day; focusing on the effect, and not the cause.

Now when we do that we're using our will out of harmony with one of God's Laws of Love, and we have no faith in it. We have no faith; we're demonstrating to ourselves that we have no faith that if we change the cause then the effect will disappear. That's what we're demonstrating. We're saying the effect wasn't caused by the thing that God's saying to us that it was caused by. So we want it to be caused by something else. We're constantly saying to ourselves, "It wasn't caused by me, it was caused by those dirty scoundrel possums that are there, that ate all my tree. That's the cause." [00:33:20.17]

14.3.3. An example of plants being damaged by frost and animals

It sort of feels like to me sometimes that I need to remove every single thing and I plant one tree and if it gets eaten, deal with the cause and then plant the second tree. That's what I need to do. And then if that gets eaten, deal with the cause and then plant one more tree. And when I get to the point where I plant the tree and nothing happens, ah, now I've released all the causes.

Most of us don't want to do that. You know what we do? We plant out the whole orchard because we're impatient and we want a result and all these kind of things. We plant a whole orchard and the whole orchard gets eaten. And we're worried about that happening and so what we do is we put all guards around everything in the orchard and of course they get all torn down and damaged. And as Peter knows down at his 15,000 acre property, pigs can come along and rip up every one of them, and at the end of the day you're going to be able to do nothing unless you deal with cause. That's the truth.

So can you see for the majority of us, we're constantly focused on fixing the effect?

**Participant** : So I was just thinking about frost, with trees, so would you even not put something around it?

No. All of our mangoes survive frosts and the reason why is because I have very little fear left. When you have fear you get cold, is that not true? When ice gets cold and when water freezes into ice then obviously it destroys the plant. We have minus six, minus seven sometimes at home, and all the mangoes survive. But they didn't survive the possums. So they survived the frost, not a problem, but they didn't survive the possums. The possum's ringbark the bottom of every mango. And that means of course that the mango dies; the whole tree dies.

So I'd be far better off saying stop this whole pointless exercise of planting fruit tree after fruit tree after fruit tree hoping for the best. Plant one, see how it goes and if it doesn't go well, deal with the emotion then plant another one once the emotion's dealt with or you think it's done and then watch what happens with that one and so forth and so forth until you can plant one that actually survives. And then you'll know you'll have dealt with these types of things, that's the reality.

I see a lot of people saying that they're dealing with their emotions and they're getting to causal issues but their life around them isn't changing. And that to me is indicating that you're not getting to the causes, no matter what you think you reached. If your life doesn't change, the effect will always change when you reach the cause. And so that's another awesome feedback system that God's set up. [00:36:33.25]

14.3.4. An example of feeling love from audience members

So if I can go even further than Mary with that. For many of you the love that comes from you towards other people has not changed the entire time we've known you. Many of you have listened to Divine Truth for four or five years and yet over that period of time, the love that comes from within you to other people cannot be felt to be any different than it was five years ago. That tells you that on the essential issues in your life, you have not changed.

14.3.5. Focusing on the cause rather than the effect (continued)

So we need to be honest about that - if there's no change occurring, it is because of our unwillingness to engage these five principles of love, truth, humility, faith and will in our day-to-day life. It's as simple as that. If we were humble to it, we would of course focus on the cause rather than the effect. So instead of going around fixing up the effect, we would focus on the reason why this particular thing happened, and we would try to fix that instead. That's what we would do if we were humble. If we're not humble we try to fix the effect because we don't believe the cause has anything to do with us when we're not humble; we feel that the cause is always to do with something else. When we're humble we see the cause has to be something to do with us because it's happening in my life. It's my life, I'm the centre of my life, so whatever is happening in my life has to be related to a cause that's inside of me, inside of my soul. I would understand that. But when I'm not humble, I don't understand that, what I do is I want it to be caused by something else. I want someone else to blame, I want somebody else to punish, I want somebody else to attack. I want somebody else to be hurt rather than me. This is what we do when we don't understand that law.

We also are not truthful about it all because the beautiful thing about the Law of Cause and Effect is that it's telling you the truth every moment, similar to the Law of Attraction. It's telling you the truth every single moment. And yet what do we do with that? We focus on the effect rather than the cause. We say, "I don't want to know the truth, I don't want to know why this happened to me. All I want to do is fix it." And God's saying to you, "You cannot fix anything unless you know why it happened." But the majority of us are going, "I don't want to know why it happened, I just want to make it different." Now if we do that, we're never going to make it different because the only way to fix what happens is by finding out the reason why it happened and fixing the reason. That's the only way to do it. Then of course when it comes to love, we're not loving ourselves as we're going around fixing up effects, are we? [00:39:39.14]

14.3.6. An example of AJ's fruit trees

It's like me planting my orchard, having it all ripped apart and destroyed, and then I go and plant another orchard. I spend thousands of dollars on plants and everything, and I'm not being loving to myself. It would be far better if I just dealt with the emotion and then all of the plants are protected. Once all the plants are protected I can plant a plant. In fact once all the plants are protected, it's highly likely that any seeds that are in the ground will automatically just come up anyway. But instead of doing that, what do I do? I go around trying to fix it up, and in the end it's pointless. So that's why basically I've told Brendan to give up planting fruit trees. I've got to fix something because all of them are getting destroyed at some point. Now most of the time now when we're home they don't get destroyed but as soon as we walk out the door and go on a trip, come back, ten or fifteen days later, they're all destroyed. So that's telling me that whatever I was feeling while I was away was very different to what I'm feeling when I'm home. And that's telling me that while I'm away I can't protect my property for some reason. My soul is not protecting my property for some reason while I'm away. When I'm home, my soul's protecting my property. So there's obviously something going on there.

So there is a lot of information it gives you if you're willing to have a look, but we don't. All we want to do is deal with the effect instead. So we go around putting our guards up. We decide, "How do we stop the possums? I'll build a great big enclosure over the whole tree." If you go out in the forest there's no enclosure over a tree; it's all just sitting there no worries, not a problem at all, no enclosures over the tree, nothing around it. It still grows, even if it's a fruit tree, it still grows. But if you come over to my backyard that's not the case. So there's obviously something wrong. And we've had to work through a lot of feeling - attacked type of emotions that are all about these kind of things, feeling bullied and attacked and all these kind of emotions that it brings up and as we deal with more of those, then less things get attacked.

14.3.7. An example of birds attacking AJ and Mary's house

**Mary** : I have a very good example about that. I think you might have mentioned in a talk previously that we used to have a magpie. Was it a magpie or a peewee?

A Murray magpie.

**Mary** : A Murray magpie that would attack the windows of our house, it would just fly in loops around the house.

Banging into every window. Many of you have got that happening at home? Yes. Banging into every window.

**Mary** : Banging in to every window and it got so bad sometimes that it was just almost all of the daylight hours.

I don't know how it ate because it never seemed to eat.

**Mary** : No! We were worried it was going to fall out of the sky from starvation because it was so horrendous.

And our windows would be plastered with bird poo all the way down the windows that it had attacked, and every month or so, I had to get out and deal with the effects of all this bird poo. So I'd get out the window cleaning gear, clean it all off, wash all the windows, and within a day, half of its back on there again from this bird.

**Mary** : Exactly.

Of course it would be great to throw a rock at the bird or shoot at the thing. (Laughter) Well that's what my father would do.

**Mary** : Well it's interesting because I was just talking to Lena about this before we started; they have a similar problem at their house sometimes. She was saying and I had to agree, that we both started out going, "We love nature, we love birds, we just want to live in nature." And then after this happens consecutively for a couple of weeks you're like, "I don't like nature, I'm very angry!" So God's showing me something here, my resistance to this issue, and I don't want to face it.

I even had a day where I really let myself feel my anger. I love birds, as many of you know, but on this day, I got a heap of rocks and I started throwing rocks at the bird. (Laughter) I knew I'd miss the thing but I was just try to...

**Mary** : You didn't have your glasses on. (Laughter)

No it was hopeless! But I was just trying to express my rage with the whole thing. [00:43:55.26]

**Mary** : So we went to the dark side, it was like "Argh!" Eventually I realised that God was trying to teach me something, and it was actually about the use of my will. I was sitting in a lot of fear and allowing a lot of spirits to attack me and just feeling blah and horrible and not getting through it. This one day I realised, hang on, God's trying to show me I have a will here, and I'm allowed to say no, I'm not listening. I'm not kowtowing to whatever the influence is. And the bird does not attack our windows anymore. For five years that I've lived with AJ, it was a constant issue.

Everyday.

**Mary** : I worked through that one emotion and the bird doesn't attack the windows anymore. But I was just talking to Lena about something that happened at their house last week.

**Participant** : It moved over there!

**Mary** : It moved over, the same bird.

I don't think so. They're territorial, so I don't think so. (Laughter)

**Mary** : No ours is still around, it walks around the house.

They're actually merrily going around. We watch him sometimes out the front now and he's digging up out the front, under the dubosia piles, and he flies towards the window and then he stops. And then sometimes he stops and then claws up the side of the window and picks off the bug that he wanted from the window, but he doesn't do any poo on the window anymore and then he flies off. He's a really polite bird actually now. (Laughter) It's like he was Jekyll and Hyde almost.

**Mary** : It's almost like the bird took on demonic properties. We were - like this bird is evil! The poor thing - it was just very spirit influenced. (Laughter) But having worked through that, last week we were at Lena and Igor's house and sometimes they have some similar emotions to me where they have some fear, and it attracts attack.

And also when we do filming down there; of course that brings a lot of the spirits who are surrounding us at our home down to Lena and Igor's home with us.

**Mary** : Well last week what happened was Cornelius decided that he wanted to do an interview about his life or about some part of his life, and Igor decided to be the interviewer.

This is very important for both of them because Igor's never wanted to be an interviewer.

**Mary** : He works behind the camera.

And Corny has always wanted to avoid any camera where possible.

**Mary** : Yes. He's trying to avoid it now! So for the guys it was a bit scary, to put it mildly. And so the guys were sitting there and there were no birds around, and there hadn't been any birds attacking the house, and all of a sudden birds started attacking the window.

While they were filming.

**Mary** : While they were filming. Lena told me that a bird started attacking every window of the house. Separate birds, on the main window opposite where the guys were sitting, there were three birds in cycles. Then they would stop and go, okay, what is going on for us? They would feel it, and every bird would disappear. So that's a clear demonstration of the cause and effect. All those birds are gone from your house now, aren't they?

**Participant** : Sort of.

**Mary** : They still come back.

Depending on how much you're open to attack, yeah.

**Mary** : But I thought that was a pretty incredible example. It reminded me of that Hitchcock movie "The Birds", where there were just birds attacking (laughing) and then they'd own it and they'd all go away until they got afraid again.

So what we're getting at is, both of these laws, the Law of Attraction and the Law of Cause and Effect give you direct feedback. They always give you direct feedback, and the majority of us ignore it. What we try to do is change the effect rather than the cause. So what they do now with the pigeons in a lot of countries around the world, in a lot of cities, is they put up these metal spikes that are so sharp, that the bird can't land on the spike without getting punctured by the spike. So of course all the pigeons that are doing it or all the other birds that are doing it don't land there anymore. Well that's an illustration of dealing with the effect. And that is not a very loving thing to do, obviously. But we are constantly doing that in our day-to-day lives, if you analyse your day-to-day life. [00:48:20.20]

15. An example of participants who are terrified of spirits

**Participant** : This question is about my using my will in the wrong direction. It's two questions actually. Dementia and suicide are quite prominent in the females on my mother's side of the family. I personally have almost no painful childhood memories. When I allow myself to feel that something in my current life hurts, it pretty will never goes naturally to any childhood event that I can remember. So the first question is, is it enough to feel the hurt, or is my unwillingness to see that people in my childhood have harmed me affecting my progress?

Well for yourself the problem is very different to what you think it is. Your family is very open to spirit influence and the main reason why is you have a multigenerational problem with fear. Fear has been passed down from generation to generation and each subsequent generation has had a stronger build-up of fear, which once the previous generations pass in the spirit world, they then influence. And so you have a very large amount of fear that got passed down through these generations of your family, coming from a European background two wars, having experienced two wars, and so forth.

As a result of this constant fear, you attract a large number of spirits who influence you on a moment-by-moment basis, and you're completely unaware of it, as are the majority of your family in fact. All of your children are affected in the same manner, you're affected in the same manner from groups of spirits using your fear against you basically but you don't see it as that.

You've basically got yourself, you've got spirits who surround you who wish to use your fear against you, and there's another group of spirits around you who wish to have you not have to experience any fear at all. So there's one group that's basically saying to you don't experience any fear at all and ironically, by not experiencing any fear, you're attracting also this other group which are utilising your fear and manipulating you and many of the actions you take as a result, through your fear of them; through your fear of spirits. So now you've got two groups of spirits who are influencing you greatly.

A participant (below) has two groups of spirits (above) who influence her in opposing ways

Now when you feel some of your grief, the reason why it's not taking you back to your childhood is because it's not your grief. It's their grief. The group of spirits who are afraid have a lot of grief and you're often experiencing their grief because you're unwilling to experience your own. You are also terrified of this second group of spirits who are angry because when you choose to feel your own, this group of spirits will up the ante, they will up their attack of you because they want you to be suppressed. They want you in your current mode, that's all they want. They don't want anything else. They don't care about you. They just want this. So you're terrified of the second group spirits who are angry, and you agree with the first group of spirits who are afraid spirits internally. [00:52:00.25]

Neena, you are definitely in the same category in terms of the amount of fear. Your family has the same amount of multi-generational fear, and you're full of it. And you don't realise it, but both of you spend the majority of time trying to get away from your fear with almost everything that you do. The projection of anger is very simple through you. What a lot of people feel from you is anger. The reason why they feel anger from you most of the time is because you're terrified of the people who are projecting the anger, and they are using you, using your body, using your ectoplasm, to project anger to other people. This is why many people are afraid of you as well. They're not necessarily feeling you; they're feeling a mixture of you and the spirits with you. The spirits with you are enraged and enraged with a lot of things; enraged with God, enraged with having to feel, enraged with quite a number of different things, and those spirits are totally willing to project anything through you and you're just letting it happen because you're terrified of them. That's why you're doing it.

Now this is your primary problem and if you think about it, I can remember saying this to Neena nearly three years ago in a talk that she completely ignored at the time. And I've actually had a personal conversation with you, Karen, about this particular problem. I've also had a personal conversation with your daughter Anna about this particular problem, all of which she doesn't necessarily believe. And Neena, I've also had personal conversations with your daughter about this particular multi-generational problem, most of which she has completely ignored to her own detriment. It's caused her to have some psychotic episodes as a result and so forth. These are all the results of this problem - this problem of the spirit influence that's going on and the amount of fear that you have to even acknowledge it, and in particular the amount of fear of the potential violence of these spirits that surround you.

**Participant** : So if I'm terrified of them, and if a lot of emotions that I'm feeling are not my own emotions, what do I do to prevent that happening?

Well you need to understand firstly that you're making a choice to not feel your own emotions because you want to feel the emotions of spirits around you, because you know that if you feel your own emotions that the second group of angry spirits will attack you, and you'll feel worse. The reality is you feel worse when you try to attempt to feel your own emotions. You don't want to feel that feeling, so you give up the process.

**Participant** : When I do feel my emotions I feel that God is with me. Is that really God then?

No, a lot of it is these spirits trying to falsify to you what's going on. God is always with you.

**Participant** : But I can feel it more when I'm...

Yeah that's not who I feel you're feeling. No. Because I've spent a little bit of time in your company, and quite often when you say that God is with you, I don't feel God with you at that time, I feel some spirits with you telling you that if you down this track - that's the way they want you to go. There is a deep feeling inside of your families and therefore all of your children, your parents as well, the parents that have passed - the same feelings exist in all of them - and the same feeling is, avoid fear, avoid fear, avoid fear at all costs. Do whatever you can. If it's self-punish, self-punish, which is something that you are given to doing at times, Karen. Self-punish rather than feel fear - this is what these spirits want you do to. And you're willing to engage it because you're unwilling to feel the terror of being attacked, which is a multigenerational problem in your families this terror that exists. [00:56:20.26]

So the problem with the emotion is that it may not take you back to an actual childhood event, because it's a multigenerational problem that's been passed down over generations through different wars and so forth, which all of the generations prior have experienced. And so since it's that, there is this feeling in you (and you're a very logical person in particular, and many in your family are very logical as well) and you go, "Because I don't know what the emotion's about, I can't feel it." So you have a complete closedness almost to feeling emotions that you do not understand.

Now you've attempted to try and get to some of them, but the problem is you're so open to these spirits, these ones who are violent with you, that whenever you try to get to them, they try to shut you down, and you're so willing to be shut down because of how much fear you have. So what I would do if I was you is focus totally on praying to God and having trust in God, having some faith that you want to get to see and feel this fear that's inside of you.

**Participant** : So all the trees that are being eaten in my garden would be a starting point too maybe.

Yes, that will all be fear of attack.

**Mary** : Can I just add something related to what you're talking about? I'm just thinking about you feeling "God" with you. As someone who has a lot of fear also, as I've progressed I've found that what I used to think was a good feeling or a sense of wellbeing was actually just me getting away from fear for a little while. So when you're pleasing these spirits, there's not as much threat coming towards you, so you feel better. It's not a real better, and what I've found is that it wasn't real happiness, it wasn't real joy, it wasn't even love. I used to think that happiness, joy and love were just the absence of me feeling terrified.

The absence of fear.

**Mary** : When actually those feelings and God are much lovelier feelings, but we can only really experience them more fully when we're willing to confront fear.

**Participant** : Just lately I've picked up on a desire that I wasn't fully aware of and I'm absorbed in that all day, that's avoiding all of that too isn't it?

Yes, very frequently it is. It's great if it's a real desire, so go along with it, but if you find you're not emotionally connected to what you're doing, then it's a great indication that actually there is a deep avoidance going on. And in fact, these spirits here, the ones who are afraid they desperately want you to find something that you're not afraid of and just do it with a passion and that way avoid the rest of your life. That's what they're attempting to achieve.

**Mary** : And both you and Neena have had lives like that, where you just get very busy doing things and you avoid.

15.1. The negative physical impact of fear

You're also both very harsh on yourself body wise, very hard on yourself. Your fear is wrecking your body. It's affecting how you look, the lines that you have on your face. All these different things that are happening are all the effect of the fear. Once you release the fear, a lot of these things will disappear naturally. But the fear is going to make it worse and worse and worse while it's within you. So how old are you at the moment? [00:59:43.00]

**Participant** : Just turned fifty-seven.

Fifty-seven, so you're seven years older than myself. So in terms of how the lines on your face and how your body feels, I know you're very, very fit but I also know that you're very hard on yourself. You force your body into lots of things that actually, when you start feeling, you'll feel quite tired doing. Your body is exhibiting in itself the fear that's governing your life. And the same applies for yourself Neena; the fear is governing your life and affecting your body, affecting far more things than you're currently aware of.

My suggestion is to pray, have some faith firstly that when this fear is felt and released that you will feel a lot better than you currently do, have some faith in God that God wants you to feel this fear and get past it. Have some faith that once you've released the fear that these spirits will have little or no effect on your life. And have some faith that if you love yourself that these things can occur. But at the moment that's not what you have. You would rather find any other emotion than fear and you spend a lot of your life doing exactly that, trying to have some kind of emotional experience other than fear.

15.2. Fear causes us to blame others and not love

**Participant** : The other question, which I don't know is relevant now, is seeing how I have hurt others in the same way that I'm feeling hurt a useful alternative?

Well yes you have hurt others obviously but one of the things that you need to understand is that the main reason why we enter into anger-based or hurtful-based situations with other people, where we blame other people for things that they either might have done or may not have done, or we just have a certain feeling that we should blame them, or we try or attempt to hurt them, a lot of this comes from fear. This is something that almost everyone who is afraid does every single moment.

15.3. Recognising anger as an avoidance of fear

When you honour fear first, you don't care what love is, that's the reality. Now you, Karen, have a very strong conscience, so when you notice yourself overtly being in a rage, you stop yourself, and you control yourself. But there are many times when you are actually in a rage both with your children and with other people and a lot of it's very passive aggressive, and because it's passive aggressive you let yourself get away with the fact that you actually feel rage. And the rage is covering over the fear.

So whenever you feel this rage rise within you, the key thing is to go, okay this is not really about rage, it's about fear. And all I'm doing when I revert to rage is I want to feel powerful, I want to feel more powerful than my own fear. And so in those moments when you feel angry, the best solution is to go, okay, let's go back to the fear and see what this fear is all about. In fact you prefer rage, shame, self-attack, attack of others, anything really other than fear. And this is the problem with this kind of multi-generational kind of fear is that it makes you feel like you prefer anything else other than fear. And yet it's the fear that you need to go to. [01:03:16.27]

**Participant** : I don't enjoy feeling angry, I make myself do it but I have to say I'm really afraid of feeling fear, I don't know how to feel fear, so I need to work on that.

Exactly. The reality is you are storing fear in your body so it's wrecking your body but you still don't believe you're able to feel it. But the reality is once you allow yourself to become more truthful about this is all about fear, and you allow yourself to be sensitive to that and you allow yourself to be aware of what's really going on around you, you will easily feel your fear. Easily.

**Mary** : Remember yesterday AJ drew the picture of the truth is only exposing a certain amount of fear? If you just really allow yourself to see more truth, more fear will be exposed and you won't have to try to feel fear. It will happen.

And for both of you just the thought of feeling fear is enough for you to have a cry. Can you feel that? Just the thought of feeling it is enough for you to cry. So that tells you how strong the fear is actually within you. Just the thought of experiencing it makes you feel like crying, so it's very important to understand that.

16. An example of a participant who was feeling angry but is now afraid

**Participant** : I was just going to ask, do I have the same issue as Karen and Neena? Because I know I get into a rage quite easily. A few months ago I was depressed all the time and just constantly in this crappy space and addicted to the crap pretty much. But I decided that I was going to get out of that and so I started taking more actions, like with things that I love doing. So I stopped being angry, because I was angry pretty much every day, just angry about everything. I just hated the world, I hated people, I hated myself, I hated my family, I hated Justin. So as every day went by, I stopped being as angry, but then I realised that I'm just in this fear all day. Like every day, I go outside, I talk to anyone, I go downtown, do my things that I need to do, fear, fear, fear, fear, fear, just living in this fear all the time. So while it's nice to not be feeling angry every day, and every moment of every day, I'm now feeling afraid every day but living in it and like Karen was.

This is what I would call progression.

**Participant** : Okay. Whereas like ...

You would prefer anger than fear.

**Participant** : Well yeah, that's why it's obviously easy for me to ...

**Mary** : But even though you prefer it you're still going with fear, which is good.

16.1. Anger covers addictions and fear

It's great. Remember I've drawn this frequently where I've said we have fear, and then we have our addictions which cover over our fear, and when our addictions don't get met we revert to anger.

Anger covers our addictions and fear

So basically when you stay in anger what you're doing is you're staying in this tantrum, "Give me what I want, give me what I want, give me what I want, give me what I want, I'm not getting what I want!" And everyone around you is not giving you what you want. So it's with everything, even the animals are not giving you what you want. The birds are not giving you what you want, where you work's not giving you what you want, your partner's not giving you what you want, your mum and dad are not giving you what you want, nobody's giving me what I want and so now you're angry with everything. Now that just covers over some addictions. And you're addictions are the things that are suppressing your fears. So when you're prepared to feel this fear, to actually feel it, feeling it is the only way it can be released. So when you're prepared to feel the fear, the anger will easily disappear. But now you'll feel terrified most of the time. [01:07:34.11]

**Participant** : Yeah, that's what's happening. And it's horrible and I'm getting to this point...

And it's not a drawback. (Laughter) I'm saying it's not; it's a good thing.

**Participant** : Well I guess I'm getting to this point now where it feels, it's just happened for so long, I think it's been, well I know I made the choice when I moved into this house that I'm living in now, so it's been four or five months or something. So I guess it's getting to the point now where it's becoming more and more painful because I'm just in it every day. So it's like I'm just starting to go, "Oh alright, hang on, I need to actually deal with this now."

Exactly. See the beauty is you're no longer reverting to anger.

**Participant** : Well sometimes I am still.

All the time I'm talking about. So what happens with the majority of people is they stop the anger because they realise the anger is getting out of hand, and they start feeling the fear that's underneath the anger. So they start feeling the fear but then the fear gets too intense, and what do they do? They go back to feeding some addictions and that in fact will produce more anger when those addictions don't get met. They never get below this fear threshold.

The majority of women who are here present today and yesterday are in this boat. You are not getting beyond your fear threshold. So when you are crying, most of the time you're not crying about causal emotional events, you are crying in a tantrum. You are having a tantrum. Just like a little child's having a tantrum, you're having one. You're more willing to cry than you are to feel fear, that's the reality. And remember how many times have I said that to you as a group? For women what have I said is the main problem? More willing to feel their sadness than they are willing to feel their fear, but their fear is what caps most of their sadness. So how are you ever going to get to the real sadness unless you're prepared to feel your fear first?

**Participant** : That's what I've noticed with myself. I was saying to Mary yesterday that it's like I'll start crying about something but I can actually feel this fear there. I'm getting to the point now where if I'm crying and I am feeling afraid, I'm starting to realise hang on, all that crying that I have done hasn't done anything.

No because it's been a tantrum. Crying in a tantrum never does anything because it's not the cause - it's an effect.

**Participant** : Yeah and the fear isn't feeling any less than what it did because I was deceiving myself.

Exactly. The only way fear can be released is by feeling it. And the majority of you ladies do not want to feel it. You can feel the stubbornness in you about this, honestly you can. You don't want to feel it - you don't want to feel your fears. And you want to revert to anger rather than feel your fear. The majority of you feel this way. I asked you yesterday why the majority of you are single; this is one of the primary reasons why the majority of you are single. You don't want to feel your fear, and that's a primary cause in fact. Your fear of opening up your heart in a relationship and having the man abuse you or use you; your fear of all of that is so intense that you would prefer to be angry rather than open up your heart and be loving. That's what you'd prefer. So this is a big problem. [01:11:07.04]

16.2. The five basics required for progression towards God in the context of anger, addictions and fear

So let's look again at these particular five essential things for our progression towards God - love, truth, humility, faith and will, in terms of how these things can cure that. You see when we exercise our will to feed our addictions our anger will build and no fear will ever be addressed. The majority of us exercise our will to feed our addictions - physical, emotional and spiritual addictions that each of us have. Some of you are addicted to the concept for example that Jesus should be a person who comes along and solves all your problems, that he does all the work for you. You're addicted to that concept. Of course when Jesus comes along and somebody comes along and says he's Jesus and he doesn't do that, you go, "He's not Jesus, because Jesus would do that. Jesus would fix all my problems for me, he's the sacrifice. He's the one that has to do all the work and I should be able to just sit in my lounge chair waiting for him to do all the work and when he's done all the work, I'll feel better." It doesn't work like that, but that's the way we want it to work and that's the use of our will. This is an issue of love - we don't want to understand that this emotion is inside of myself. No one else can release it for me. No one else can do anything about it, other than me. If I love myself, I would honour that.

**Mary** : Can I add to that? I often see people saying, "I've got to feel my fear, I've got to feel my fear," so they think I'm working on humility but in fact a lot of the decisions we're making in our life, what we decide to do is actually to avoid fear. So it's never going to work.

So you're actually using your will daily to avoid your fear.

**Mary** : And this is how will and humility support each other. When you really want to feel yourself you'll use your will in order to make decisions that will help you feel, support you feeling, that will confront your fears. Also when you use your will in that way, it will help your humility develop because you're not avoiding things. Did I explain that clearly?

I don't know if everybody understood, but I feel that I did.

**Mary** : One out of one hundred and fifty! (Laughter) Who probably already knew it already, but anyway.

So whenever we're using our rage to mask our fear, we're not loving ourselves, we're not being honest with ourselves, we're not being humble, we don't have any faith in any of God's Laws that once we get to the cause that everything will be cured. We're using our will to feed our addictions. Love, truth, humility, faith and will are not happening in that place.

16.2.1. Feeding our addictions is unloving and damaging

When we are feeding our addictions, we are not loving to ourselves. Most of you believe that you are loving to yourselves when you feed your addictions. Most of you still believe that. Most of you still think that when you get up in the morning and desire that coffee that giving yourself the coffee is love. That's what you believe. Or you go out to dinner and you're with some friends and they all have alcoholic drinks and you decide, oh I'll just go along, it's okay, it's just one time or whatever, you think that's love, feeding your addictions is love. It's not love. [01:14:28.01]

In relationships you think feeding addictions is love; many of you feel that feeding your addictions in almost every case is love. It's not love at all. You are permanently harming yourself until such a point in time as you are willing to feel your fear. So while you're feeding your addictions, you are avoiding your fears and while you're feeding your addictions you're never going to get to your fears. Therefore you're never going to get to the grief that's under it. You're never going to be at-one with God feeding your addictions, ever. That's reality.

Yet the majority of you are not even aware that if you passed right now today, the highest desire you would have when you entered the spirit world is to feed your addictions. All of what you've heard about Divine Truth will just get chucked out the window to be honest because in the spirit world it's much easier for you to feed your addictions than it is here on Earth. It is also faster; the passion and desire to do it is very strong and there is no external resistance to doing it. In other words there are no people on Earth who might put you in gaol if you do it.

Here on Earth if some of you fully acted upon some of your emotions right now, you'd be thrown in gaol, because it wouldn't be acceptable by society, so that's the only reason why you don't do it. When you get to the spirit world, you won't get thrown in gaol if you do it. So it's highly likely you'll go ahead and do it.

So these addictions are a primary thing that we're still feeding, and as a result we're not understanding that it's unloving to continually feed your addictions. It's not honest, it's also not humble, it's also not developing any faith that in the end when you remove your addictions you'll be happier. Most of you don't believe that. Most of you believe that the only time you're happy is when you get your addictions met. And the reality is from God's Perspective that you're going to be much happier once you release the addictions from your life. But most don't believe that. Most people on Earth don't believe that let's face it, do they.

You tell the average guy on Earth that gets drunk every weekend that if he gave up the addiction to drinking every weekend that he'd actually be happier and he'd tell you you're an idiot; that's the only happiness that he has. He's working solidly through the week so he can get enough money and so that he can drink most of it away on the weekend.

This is the way the world we live in thinks and many of you still think that way with your addictions. You still think that feeding your addictions is going to bring you happiness. It's not. Feeding your addictions finishes up destroying your life actually. And if it doesn't destroy it while it's here, it'll certainly destroy it while you're in the spirit world because when we don't deal with an addiction here on Earth, you know what happens when we pass? We then try to feed the addiction in the spirit world and we just keep trying to feed it, keep trying to feed it and many of you will keep trying to feed your addictions after you hit the spirit world for years. You'll never get out of the hells of the first sphere doing that, but you will keep doing it, keep doing it, that until you exhaust yourself with the pain of it. And then you'll stop. My suggestion is to stop earlier than that. [01:17:58.25]

16.3. Progressing from feeling anger and living in addictions to feeling fear

**Mary** : Avarna can I complement you because I feel you've taken a step...

You've taken some active steps to do that.

**Participant** : Now I've just got to take the next step.

You're in a critical condition now. The critical condition is this: you don't want to feel all your fear. You need to acknowledge that you don't want to feel it all and you need to take care with your next steps. The reason why is there will be a tendency to want to avoid it and go back to anger.

**Mary** : Or addiction.

**Participant** : Yeah I've notice that happened just with some stuff that was happening a few weeks ago. I won't go into the story but something was happening for a couple of weeks and I was really angry and just in a rage. Before that, I think it was the last seminar maybe, where I was saying that I had repented about having harmed people and was noticing more and more everyday just what my actions were doing towards people. So I started to feel before this sort of two week thing that happened that I had love in mind every day.

So you were feeling positive.

**Participant** : Yeah. And you know I was consciously aware that every time I'd interact with people just my own stuff that was going on that might have harmed them, and the choices that I was making. But then this thing happened and then I realised a short time after that, hang on, all that stuff just flew out the window and I just went right back to square one. And I'm like, "This really sucks and I want to go back to how I felt just before that."

So what you're starting to feel is the difference when you're truly happy compared to when you're just happy in an addiction. And what you will start to feel when you're in that place is you start realising that every time you revert back to the addictive processes, it actually hurts more now. Before you would have been normal with that but now it hurts.

**Participant** : Yeah, and more and more I feel with Justin, the more that I keep engaging in the addiction it just feels wrong and it feels like it's not getting us anywhere and we're just creating the same cycle like we have for the last three years, that same thing - we talk about the same problems, I'm angry about the same stuff, he's angry about the same stuff and so it's just that next step of...

Yeah that's right. The pain of that starts going, this is both of us wanting our addictions met, both of us not wanting to feel our fears, once you get to this layer where you start feeling your fears, you don't want to desert it, you want to let yourself go through it rather than getting out of it. And what we see a lot of people doing is they hit this place of fear, and unfortunately, the fear is like a huge wall in our minds, and also often in our emotions - it's a big wall. So you think of this as a big brick wall, you know like with all the bricks here and here's little you coming along to this wall.

We view our fear as a huge wall

**Participant** : That looks pretty huge!

You nudge against it a bit and then you go, "This is too big for me to handle." But what we don't realise is one truth in that place. All of that fear is actually inside of you, so therefore you are already handling it. All you need to do is experience it to release it. You're actually already living in it. So therefore you're already handling it, it's not going to be any worse than what you've already had to handle. [01:22:04.04]

All of our fear is already inside of us

**Participant** : The thing is like the more I live in it anyway, the worse it feels every day because I am trying to avoid it.

**Mary** : It actually takes more energy to avoid it than to feel it.

And that's the beautiful thing that God's done too with our soul. It takes more energy to avoid an emotion than to feel the emotion. So it makes sense to just feel it.

**Participant** : Something I was going to ask because something I still don't understand probably is about living in truth because what I have in the past...

Rather than you going through an explanation can I just give a few things about that? It's impossible to live in truth while you have so much fear inside of you. Impossible. So give up the idea of living in truth. Give up the idea of being present because it's impossible to be present while you have so much fear inside of you. Give up the idea that you're connected to anything, because you're not connected to anything while you've got so much fear inside of you. Just focus your attention on feeling the fear. Nothing else.

**Participant** : But haven't you said in the past that you need truth, love and humility to be able to grow towards God?

Yeah but what you're being now is being truthful. You truthfully have a whole heap of fear inside of your soul. You're now being truthful about it. Before when you were angry, you weren't truthful about it. Now you're being truthful about it. Now you're actually starting to choose to feel it rather than blame other people, blame your environment, blame the world.

**Participant** : As much, I'll say it still happens.

But you're starting. Like I said; it's a process that you're going through. And this is a more truthful place; you are living in more truth in that moment. So forget about trying to live in more truth, just focus on one thing, this fear is what I have inside of me and this is what I'm feeling right now and I need to feel this until it's all gone. Focus on that.

16.4. Fear blocks the absorption of truth into the soul

See the problem with fear is it prevents the absorption by your soul of truth. So no matter what intellectual truth you believe you have right now, it cannot enter your soul unless you release your fear. And this applies to everyone; truth cannot enter your soul unless you release your fear on the same subject. It can't enter your soul. It's only entered your head. Right now most of the things that I've given you about Divine Truth have only entered your head. And it's only entered your head because you've been unwilling to feel your fear. When you feel your fear now your soul will start absorbing the truth and then it will be automatic to live in it because your soul has absorbed it. [01:24:53.29]

**Participant** : Well I found that a little bit because I remember at the last seminar, I had a feeling like I wanted to come and talk to you guys but I felt really afraid and just because of past experiences that I've had and my fear then...

Past experience's talking to us have been terrible, haven't they?!

**Participant** : Well I mean my own feelings that have come up.

But how many of you feel that? That past experiences of talking to us have been terrible? This is a common feeling.

**Participant** : Yeah, but I purposefully made the point of feeling through a bit of the fear before the seminar, and then I came and spoke to you guys afterwards and it was really nice. I'm like, I'm so stupid, I make up this big stupid idea of what I think is going to happen and how I think you guys are going to be angry at me ...

Yeah, we're angry at everyone all the time.

**Participant** : Yeah, but it's like I blow up this big stupid picture in my head and then normally I'll go, "Oh no I don't want to go and talk to them because it's too scary and they're going to be like this and that," and de, da, de, da. So it's been good to just sort of feel through some of it.

Do you understand this principle that if fear is inside of your soul, truth on the same subject will not be able to enter your soul? So any truth that you think you've heard has only gone into your mind, it hasn't gone into your soul on any particular subject. So if there's one subject where there's no fear at all, then that truth may have entered your soul. But any subject in which you have fear, your soul cannot absorb the truth while that fear exists. So give up trying to live in truth on those issues because you won't be able to. It's just a fake existence doing that. The best thing you can do is feel the fear so that you're able to have that truth absorbed. That's the best thing you could do.

**Mary** : So you could welcome truth about yourself, you can welcome the fact that yeah, I'm frightened, that's a truth about yourself.

I'm terrified of most things.

**Mary** : And there I am again, I'm afraid. Well that's a truth about me - I just avoided that and I was nasty to that person - there's a truth about me. That's a truthful way of living and it helps you expose your fear more and more. But a lot of us get to the point of going, yeah I'm afraid and then we kind of, because we're afraid, we step back from it and begin to rationalise the other reasons why we're doing things. For example, "I just had to tell them a truth," when really it's about pushing away an interaction that was making us afraid.

16.5. An example of AJ overcoming the fear of being himself in public

Can I give you an illustration of my life again? Before I allowed myself to go through the psychological experience of coming to terms with my own identity, I used to have many memories about my identity of course and I just put them in what I would classify now as the fear basket. It's also called the too hard basket. You know that basket? So here's the basket and it's called the too hard basket, which really should be renamed to be the fear basket.

The "too hard" basket is really our fear basket

What I used to do with all of my experiences is I would put them in this basket if they got too strong. There were a lot of experiences I had where I thought I could handle the fear. One of them was I used to speak in front of around five thousand people at one point in my life. For two days beforehand I would be beside myself with terror, speaking to large groups of people. Eventually I got so used to doing it that I was quite relaxed. I actually believed that I had no fear at all about speaking in front of large groups of people. I had no fear, so eventually I spoke in front of these large groups, so in other words my habit made me think and feel like I'd reduced my fear. [01:29:21.11]

So along came all of the issues of having to work through my emotions, I start working through my emotions, and you know what happened? I couldn't speak to one person without getting afraid. That fear was in me already and I had just used my will in such a strong negative manner, putting everything that I was afraid of in this too hard basket, anything that I felt like I wouldn't cope with, I would habitually get to the point where I could do it and do it in a seemingly relaxed manner, while I internally still felt the terror which I was denying. And I got to this point where I couldn't even speak to one person without getting afraid.

Now at that time I thought that I'd made a terrible mistake because I went from being able to speak to five thousand people to only being able to speak to one person and still being afraid. I used to go shopping in that place when I was afraid of one person and I would be too afraid to get out of the car to walk into the shopping centre to buy the things that I need. Now that's a bit of trouble when you're living by yourself because there's no one else to do it for you. So eventually what I tried to do was I'd go to the shopping centre and during this phase I would feel all of my feelings. I'd go to the shopping centre and I think I've told you this before; I would sit there for four hours, doing nothing, having people looking at me, going, "What's going on with him? Why is he sitting there with tears rolling down his face?" and whatever. And I would deal with the fear that I felt in the shopping centre. Now eventually I dealt with most of this fear and now I can be myself completely no matter who's around.

So the audience a few weeks ago for the media that we did, was I think about two point something million, and I was still able to be myself. But I had to go through this place where it looked like everything was getting worse because that was the place where I started to feel what was in the too hard basket and therefore feel the fear that was present. I had to go through that place.

When you're going through that place, you believe things are worse but actually they're better. So some people have come up to us recently and said, "Oh you know I'm really worried." And you go okay, "So what are you worried about?" And they tell us this whole story, and you say, "Why are you worried about that? That's because you're in fear now. That's fantastic." And they go, "But I'm all confused and my life feels worse," and I say, "Yeah, it's going to feel like that. It's going to feel like that because you're now feeling your fear. You're going to have all sorts of Law of Attraction events triggering your fear now because you're willing to go through them.

16.6. Staying open to fear by focusing on love, truth, humility, faith and will

**Participant** : I wanted to know how to stay open to that fear. I feel like you really did just answer it for me.

But it's a very good question - how to stay open to the fear. The way you stay open to the fear is, you focus on these qualities of love, truth, humility, faith and will.

**Participant** : And that's what I wanted to ask as well as loving myself, because I was hearing you say before with the example of the orchard about staying open, and I know that I'm really spirit influenced as well so how do I stay open?

Well let's look at each one of these and look at how it affects staying open to your fear. Remember when we place fear as our God, as we spoke of yesterday, that's the main reason why we don't do these things – love, truth, humility, faith and will. What we do is we say that fear belongs up the top in a priority list, where fear comes before love, fear comes before truth, fear comes before humility and so forth. Once we're prepared to feel our own fear, we no longer honour fear in that regard. In other words we no longer place it as the highest priority in our life; we no longer see it, even though we feel that it should be; we no longer will allow ourselves to continue placing it in this high priority in our life anymore.

And what we do in that moment, when we love ourselves, we're actually allowing ourselves to feel the fear; that is loving yourself more. See before when you're denying your fear, that's not loving yourself as much because your fear's in you are wrecking your body, wrecking your life, having all of these attraction events occur, the cause of all these negative events, and that's not loving to you in that moment. When you start allowing yourself to feel this fear now you're loving yourself more, this is wonderful. Like God's going, "At last my daughter is letting go of some things"; this is how God sees it.

We're also in a more truthful place because most of the time if you think before we feel fear, most of the time we believe we have none or very little. We tell ourselves, I haven't got much fear, I might be afraid of you know ... and usually you come up with physical things, like I'm afraid of snakes, but I don't really have much fear of emotion, I don't have much fear of people. But once we start getting more honest with ourselves we start realising that our primary fears are actually our personal emotions. Our primary fears are not a snake or a spider or some other physical thing but rather what's inside of us \- shame and other emotions inside of us are our primary fears. So when we honour the truth of that and honour the fact that we start feeling the fear, we are now in far more harmony with God and therefore we will be able to feel God a lot more in that place.

We're also far more humble if you think about it because now instead of reverting to anger and control and addiction all the time, which is what we use to stay away from our fear before, now we're saying - I'm refusing to go to my anger all the time. I'm refusing to go to my addictions all the time. Instead what I'm going to do is to be humble to the experience of this fear, even if it feels terrible, even if I feel terrible for six months or twelve months, that's how long it takes.

16.6.1. AJ's experience of releasing fear

For myself my primary fears took me around nearly four years to release. So it took me nearly four years to go through the process of releasing most of my fears. Of course I've been tortured and I've had all other sorts of things happen, things that you haven't had happen so there's a chance that you'll take less then that if you allow yourself to feel your fear.

But if you really have faith in God, no matter how long that process takes, you will do it. And that's what I had to come to terms with. How much faith do I have with God that God is leading me through this process to get me beyond my fear? And I realised that a lot of it depended on my will. I had to be willing to stay in this place of feeling fear rather than always trying to get myself out of it, always trying to take some kind of alternative action such as distract myself, go and do something, get some exercise, you know all the other things that I'd try to do to reduce the feeling of this fear.

In fact I got to the point where I had so much fear in my body that I found that I had to lay up to four hours a day in my bed just flat, feel the fear in my body and just feel in a panic for those four hours. I used to do that every single day, and remember I did that for nearly four years, so by the time the four hours dissipated, I could feel the fear relieved itself from my body and then I could get up and do some things without fear, but only then. And that took around four hours a day for me. Now like I said if you've been tortured or other things have happened to you, then naturally that might be the case for you too. [01:37:45.09]

It was wrecking my body so much that when I began processing fear, when I was thirty-three years old, everybody who met me thought that I had Parkinson's disease because I would shake, and they'd say, "What's wrong with you?" And I'd say, "Nothing." I would be shaking so much that everyone could see me shaking so much and they'd all be asking me what's going on. I didn't know what was happening at the time until I started feeling that and then I realised that's what it's all about, that's why I'm shaking like this.

Now after I went through a lot of my memories about my identity and all those kind of things, I went through another bout of it, which took four years and then I came out of that, now I feel much better, much better. I still have fears that I recognise, but now it doesn't govern my life anymore.

Now when you can see that if you really honour each of these qualities, love, truth, humility, faith and will, then they will help you feel this fear. But all you have to do is compromise in one of these areas and all of a sudden you won't be feeling fear anymore. So if you compromise by saying, "I don't want to use my will to feel my fear," and bang, you will find that you won't be able to feel it anymore. Or if you compromise by going, "I don't have any faith that if I release my fear that it can actually be released, I don't have any belief in that, I don't have any belief that I can be perfect without fear." and because you don't have any faith that it's even possible, you're not even going to try. You won't even try; you'll try everything else other than that.

So many of you have spent five years with your fear going, "What else can I do other than that? Oh I know what I'll do, I'll have a relationship, that'll help me get out of some of it," or I'll have a bit more sex or I'll drink a bit more or I'll try and stay in my body or I'll do these practices or whatever it is that you try to do to avoid fear, I'll be busy. I know what I'll do, I'll get rid of my single house over on the sunny coast that's got a lovely garden already and I'll buy forty acres over here and then I'll have so much work to do that I won't even know what I'm afraid of. Many of you have chosen to make that decision for that one reason actually: to avoid a fear. And that's really not having any faith in God that you can address the fear.

So when you actually allow yourself to hold on to these very positive qualities, you'll find eventually that you'll get to the fear and you'll want to go through it. You'll want to. And every little bit you go through, there's another relief in my life. Another thing gone that I don't have to worry about ever again. Ever, in all my future. And because you're willing to feel your fear, you won't be focused on feeding your addictions. So when you hit the spirit world, when you feel terrified, instead of trying to go and get an addiction met, you'll go, I'll feel my fear instead. You'll make that choice. And you'll be in a far better condition when you do that, a far better condition. In fact you'll probably be in the second sphere if you get to that point while you're on Earth because the first sphere is all about fear. It's all about fear. [01:41:35.27]

Putting It All Together: Session 2 Part 2

17. The importance of focusing on fear

The reason why the answers to your question take so long is because there is a lot to explain. Often too I think we want a yes or no answer, or we'd love to have a simple answer; many of us would prefer to have the answer that says, "Don't worry about that." (Laughs) So it's very good if we can be fairly thorough.

Can you see that a lot of the things we've already discussed in the last couple of hours have been about fear? In fact many of you don't realise how important it is yet to actually address fear. There's still a desire to avoid fear and a desire to do almost anything but feel fear. I remember a conversation Mary and I had, it would have been maybe six to twelve months ago now, I can't remember exactly, and Mary was asking me at the time, because she wanted to write a blog about being present in your body. I was reading what Mary had written and she listed all these different things about how to stay present in your body. And she listed all these things about drink and eat and...

**Mary** : I haven't posted them on the blog yet; you're spoiling the suspense! (Laughs)

Anyway, all these different things.

**Mary** : I'm joking. Share them.

And I said to Mary, "Look, darling, I don't know why you're writing this blog." And she said, "Well, what do mean? What's wrong with it?" Mary often goes, "What's wrong with it now?" (Laughs) She doesn't do that anymore but that used to be the case. And I said, "Well, you don't realise that everything that you've said would automatically happen if you didn't have any fear." So you know how people write all this stuff about how to be present in your body and all that stuff, the only reason why you're not present in your body is because you're afraid and you're not feeling your fear. That's the only reason why you're not present. Fear in fact is the main reason why you're not doing most things.

For many of you, you've now listened for three to five years of presentations involving Divine Truth. For many of you, you've been to like 60, 70 or 80% of the talks we've ever given. Now I would call that dedication. Now there's a reason why you're dedicated like that. There has to be a reason. There has to be a soul-based reason why you want to do that given the fact that you've hardly progressed in that time. (Laughter)

So I honour the fact that you have inside of yourself a desire for love, truth, humility, faith and will. Inside of you there is a desire for these things, a desire for love, a desire for truth and so forth. Many of you have a desire for these things inside of you, you do. But you know what causes you do dishonour these desires? Just fear. Every single time, whenever you fail to honour these things, love, truth, humility, faith and will, it's always because of fear. Always.

Fear prevents us from honouring love, truth, humility, faith and will

And can you see from that concept that fear then must be the thing that you address the most? Because without letting go of it, many of these things - love, truth, humility, faith and will - will not be possible. Many of them will not be possible. Every time you honour fear you will not be able to be loving - ever, actually. You will not be able to be loving. So you can think you want to be loving as much as you want but if you honour fear, you will never be able to be loving.

In fact perfect love throws fear completely aside. When you perfectly love there will be no fear in you. The only thing preventing a person with a desire to be at-one with God from being at-one with God is the fear that exists inside of them that they are unwilling to release because if they released the fear, the sadness will just come out of you. It'll just come out. The only reason why the sadness isn't just coming out is because you're afraid of it. So it stays in.

So can you see that the majority of work that you will need to use your will to do will be surrounding fear? Now for the majority of you, you don't want to know that. This is why I've given so many talks about fear because fear is the thing that stops you from being all of these things - love, truth, humility, faith and will. And it's your exercise of your will to avoid fear that causes you to not do any of these in a perfect way. So you can't love while you're in fear. You don't even want to hear the truth when you're in fear let along do it. When you're in fear you don't want to even hear it. You cannot be humble while you're in fear, it's impossible. You will most of the time revert to rage or at least to addiction when you're in fear and you don't want to feel you fear. You won't be humble. You won't have any faith when you're in fear because the only thing you believe in is your fear. That's the only thing you really have faith in. [00:07:03.18]

So instead of having faith in God, faith in God's Laws, faith in the process, faith in love, faith in truth, faith in humility, you'll have no faith in any of those things while this fear remains in you. You can think you can do it; you will not be able to. While this fear remains inside of you as a feeling and doesn't come out, and the only way it's going to come out is by you feeling it, it's impossible for you to love, impossible for you to want truth, impossible for you to be humble, impossible for you to focus on faith and to use your will appropriately. When I say impossible to be humble, that's probably the only thing that's not impossible. But when you put fear above everything else, then it will be impossible. You have to start seeing this as just an emotion. It's just an emotion. The majority of you don't see it as an emotion; you see it as a monster. That's how you see it. You don't see it as an emotion. It is just an emotion, that's all.

18. An example of a participant who uses many strategies to avoid fear

**Participant** : I've lived in fear and terror and have been aware of it before I met you. It's been my major thing. I don't do any of that stuff - love, truth, humility, faith and will - because of that fear. I'm really aware of that.

So you are now well aware that your fear is your God, basically.

**Participant** : Yes. I was beginning to access some terror and fear and now I just feel that I have lost my confidence in doing that. I want to do it! - I don't care about crying and stuff like that. (Participant is crying)

Now can I just stop you for a moment? The comment that you have lost your confidence in doing that, can I say that your confidence was misplaced in the first place. You had confidence in yourself doing it. The person you need confidence in is not yourself. The person you need confidence in to process fear is confidence in God. So when you say you have lost your confidence in doing it, I don't think that is necessarily a bad thing. Because the real person you need confidence in is God.

God's got your back. And you don't believe that at this point, that's the problem.

**Participant** : I have accessed that feeling of reliance on Him during that, for little bits.

When you did process? Yep. Good.

**Participant** : But now I just feel like I'm blocked by everything. You know by self-pity, punishments, spirits.

So let's list some of the things you're blocked by. So self-pity, self-punishment.

**Participant** : Spirit influence, a huge investment in my facade because I'm so afraid of being judged and rejected.

So you're worried about external judgement of you. Of course a lot of these things are internal judgements, aren't they?

**Participant** : In my addictions, I just see them and I'm aware of them and yet I just can't seem to make that step.

To avoid them?

**Participant** : To let go. It's like they've got a strangle hold on me that I just can't seem to let go of them. It's really, really difficult.

Alwyn can I just say to you, it is wonderful what you are saying. Because these are the primary reasons why most people don't deal with their fear, all these things - self-pity, self-punishment, spirit influence, external judgement and addictions. What you're expressing really, very well, is exactly what the majority of people will need to look at while they're working through fear. But please continue. [00:11:45.23]

**Participant** : I also have come to not feel like I'm relying on other people saying what fear processing looks like and feels like.

So what would you call that?

**Participant** : Sort of comparing and worrying that I'm not doing it.

Doubting yourself.

**Participant** : Doubt yes.

But really what it is, is seeking confirmation from others, isn't it?

**Participant** : Yep.

Which can you see is actually just a fear anyway? In other words you're not going to do it yourself unless somebody gives you confirmation that you're going in the right direction. So that's really just a fear of going in the wrong direction yourself.

**Participant** : Yes, I mean I think those are ...

Your primary ones?

**Participant** : The primary ones that I feel. And because that fear is with me all the time it's not like I'm ever happy. You know, I can cry and make myself feel okay, but it doesn't work like that for me, it's just ...

Exactly. The majority of people in fear feel the same way as you do, to be honest. So let's look at some of these things because some of them are things that we do in order to avoid, and other things we do because they're a part of our fear that we need to break down. And other things are happening to us because we're attempting to get away from the feeling. So I'll try to help with each one of these things in terms of what's actually going on.

18.1. Self-pity, avoidance and commiseration

Self-pity. What do you feel self-pity's about? Any ideas? Do you have any ideas yourself?

**Participant** : Well it's like you said yesterday about, there has to be another way. I don't know, I haven't found it.

It's a way of avoiding, it's a choice to avoid, I agree. And what you're trying to choose to avoid is responsibility for whatever is going on. So it's usually responsibility to feel an emotion. So instead you have pity on yourself about having to feel the emotion rather than actually feeling the emotion itself. It also is born from a desire to have other people feel pity for you. So quite often when a person goes into self-pity, they're also really wanting other people to feel sorry for them but nobody is, and so they take on that role themselves. [00:14:37.11]

**Mary** : So is that commiseration? Desire for commiseration?

Yeah desire for commiseration internalised, if you like. You want yourself to commiserate with yourself about having the emotion rather than actually taking responsibility and feeling the emotion. That is a great way of avoiding fear. A lot of these are actually avoidances of fear you'll find.

18.2. Self-punishment and fear of violence

Let's look at self-punishment; self-punishment is a great way of avoiding fear because what you do when you punish yourself is you prevent anyone else from punishing you during that process. And what it indicates is that you're actually afraid of other people punishing you but you don't want to feel that fear and so what you do instead is punish yourself and that way you get away with it.

**Participant** : I think you mentioned that, or Mary did, as barter; bartering with God and bartering with others to avoid it.

Exactly, yeah. And there is this feeling that many people have from their childhood, which is an actual feeling, in that many of us had it created while a child, that when we punish ourselves, we get away from our parent punishing us. So there is a very strong motivation of avoiding violence in self-punishment. So what you're often trying to do when you're self-punishing is you're trying to avoid external violence perpetrated by somebody else, towards yourself. And so you punish yourself first, in order to avoid what they would do if you didn't punish yourself. So again, this is really a fear of other people.

18.3. Spirit influence and fear of external judgement

Now spirit influence is a lot about fear of other people. The reason why we get so influenced by spirits frequently is because we're terrified of what other people think, what other people do, what other people say and so we are extra open to absorbing what they tell us and because we're extra open to absorbing what a person tells us, we're also extra open to absorbing what a spirit tells us. And the spirit tells us to do this or do that, we may even think it's our own feelings even, that's how much or how willing we are to do what somebody else wants us to do.

Now many of you learnt that when you were a child as well. The way you learnt it was the parent projected at you a certain emotion of rage when you didn't do what they wanted. And because when you're a child you're very sensitive to that, what happens is that you then learn that as long as you do what mummy or daddy want, you won't get the feeling of rage projected at you. And you also learnt that when you got the feeling of rage projected at you it meant automatically that you'd done something wrong. Now some of you rebel against that but the majority of us don't. The majority of us go into doing what the parent wanted instead. So this is what partly attracts the spirits with us as well.

This is also why we are so sensitive to external judgement because we're basically on hyper alert. If you can imagine it like you are in a radar scanning everything around you, 360 degrees around you, you're scanning everything and you're going, okay, there's a bad feeling.

**Participant** : Yeah, I call it the rejection radar. I know it.

And most people in fact know of it, they can scan a whole room and there's the person I've got to be afraid of, because they can feel what the barrage is coming from that person. And many of us have this very sensitive radar from a very young age; we learnt to be very, very sensitive about everything that's happening around us.

We've got this radar, and we're not concerned about any good emotion in that place. So if somebody loves us, we skip over that because that's a feeling that you don't have to worry about. If somebody approves of you, skip over that. Somebody really quite likes you, skip over that and you skip over most things with the exception of only the things that you know are going to be traumatic to experience. What this does is it makes us desensitise to loving emotions, because we skip over them in our scanning and we are ultra-sensitive to any unloving emotion. You know that feeling where you're ultrasensitive to the unloving emotion and not sensitive at all to anybody really loving you or caring about you? When you're going around and you're scanning, this is how you see the world now - anything that's loving is safe, anything is out of harmony with love is not safe. And now, instead of love, our focus becomes avoiding what is not safe. That's our primary focus. So this makes us very, very open to the absorption of external judgement. [00:19:46.20]

So if someone has a bad opinion of me, so when Robert has a bad opinion of me over there, I can feel that immensely. Oh it's just terrible, I can't handle it. And yet when Robert has a nice feeling about me, I can't feel it at all. I'm not even open to feeling it because I'm only open to being sensitive to the things that are bad because they're the things that I'm trying to prevent. To be frank with many of you, you know these feelings. Many of you know this is what goes on. But for yourself and most people who are in a lot of fear, this is a heightened sense of awareness, of everything going around as long as it's unloving. It's not a heightened sense of awareness of loving things; you don't know who's even loving you in that moment. Because of this you're very, very tempted to ignore love and only respond to any form of judgement that comes into your sphere of awareness. And so you're very sensitive to external judgement.

Someone just has to say, "Oh, your hair's too long," and bang, you'll go and get it cut, that kind of thing. Or they might say, "Oh, you don't suit pink," and you never wear pink the rest of your life and you get your whole wardrobe of pink and throw it in the dustbin. That's how sensitive we can become to just a comment. That's just an opinion but we don't see it as an opinion, we see it as the truth about ourselves because we're so open to it. And as a result of that too, the spirits who are around us can suggest things to us that are totally out of harmony with love and also totally wrong and yet we'll just take them on board. We'll just take them on board every time.

18.4. Addictions

Now because of all these strategies that we use - self-pity, self-punishment, spirit influence, external judgement, addictions and seeking confirmation, we then revert back to trying to have an addictive lifestyle. So what we do is we have all of these terrible feelings that are going on that we're not willing to experience because we feel we're going to be overwhelmed by experience, and what we do instead is we focus on addictively trying to avoid such things. Of course the more we try to avoid it, usually you finish up attracting even more of it, and before we know it, we're living a whole lifestyle of addiction but we're still not really avoiding any of it - that's what often happens for a person who has a lot of fear.

18.5. Placing love, truth, humility, faith and will above fear

All of this is occurring for only a few reasons: because we are unwilling to do a number of things inside of ourselves. We are unwilling to put fear down a peg and place these qualities that we say we want to develop love, truth, humility, faith and will above the fear.

In other words internally we're not willing to use our will, we're not desiring even to use our will, to place what we believe are character traits, which are of extreme importance for our future life, and we're not willing to place them as a list in a priority list order, above the importance of dealing with our fear or trying to prevent our fear. We have what I would classify as a concept of character, we are choosing to base all of our character on fear rather than to have all of these character traits, love, truth, humility, faith and will, and make fear submissive to these particular things. [00:23:39.19]

So at the moment you could say that your fear has placed itself on the top of this list and love, truth, humility, faith and will have become submissive to fear. What we need to do internally is to place all of these things above our fear and put fear on the bottom of this list.

Now the question then becomes, how do I do that? That's what's got to happen, how do I do that? Does anybody have any ideas of how you would do that? How do you go ahead and do that?

**Participant** : Can we just do everything opposite to what fear tells us to do?

That's one way. One way is to do everything the opposite to what the fear tells us to do. Now when I had a discussion with a group in 2008 that was my suggestion. It was a discussion about "The Human Soul - Fear is Your Friend" and in that discussion I made the one single suggestion, that's probably the most important suggestion about fear, and that is do everything the opposite to what your fear tells you to do. Everything. That requires a very strong will to do that, yes I agree, but if you choose to do that, that one choice will change your entire life, very, very rapidly by the way.

The second thing also needs to be engaged. What do you think the second thing is? Once you choose to do everything the opposite of what your fear says there's one other thing that you're going to need in order for progression to occur, and what's that? To feel the fear rather than avoid it. So there are only two things we really need to do in order to address fear.

By the way you can address fear without God at all. There are plenty of people historically in the spirit world who have done this. They've let go of most of their fears without having any relationship with God, so it's possible to do this without any relationship with God. With a relationship with God it's much, much easier of course because you always remember this relationship, you always remember where you're working towards and as you release fears, you'll feel a closer relationship with God. So that will give you faith that it's all working whereas a person without that doesn't get that. Without the desire for God, you don't get that. So without God you can do this or with God it will be much easier.

So you do two things - you do everything the fear tells you not to do, and you do nothing that the fear tells you to do. That's what you choose. Nothing the fear tells you to do, everything that fear tells you not to do, that's if you're aware of the fear. Now when we begin many of us are not aware of all of our fears, so we can only do it with a few things, but eventually your awareness of fear grows through this process and you realise, oh I'm afraid of that as well, oh I'm afraid of that as well and so you put that thing on the do not do list or never do list, and you honour love, truth, humility, faith and will instead. But for this to work you must choose to feel your fear as an emotion, you must choose to do it. Because the reality is if you don't choose to do it all that will happen is your fear will heighten and nothing will be released. And what do you think life's going to feel like after that? That's a pretty scary life because nothing changes. Your fear has been heightened, but you haven't chosen to change anything.

So the second thing, which is one of the primary things we need to learn, is be humble to the experience of the emotion of fear. So once we do those two things, you'll find your entire life will change very, very rapidly. That's all I chose to do, I made a list - and this is why I've encouraged you to make a fear list. I made a list of all of the fears I was aware of at the time. Now even right now I've got fears that I'm not aware of, because if I didn't have them I'd already be at-one with God. So I know that I've got fears I'm not aware of, so one of the options is to start praying about what am I not aware of, because that's very important. But most of us have a long list of fears that we are aware of. So what I'd suggest is for you to write down that long list of fears you're aware of, and write down all the things you do as a result of wanting to make those fears go away or what addictions you have as a result that cause those fears to go away and choose to not do it anymore. Choose. [00:28:59.05]

**Participant** : So how I've gone about doing this is I've avoided all those things and I'll get up in the morning, and I'll feel fear and I'll go off and feel the fear, not doing any of that stuff, doing something that triggers me, it's just there and I do it.

So my suggestion is go now and do the things that you're afraid of doing and choose to feel your fear while you're doing them. Choose to feel your fear while you're doing them. If you find you can't feel your fear while you're doing them, imagine yourself doing them and already some fear will come up and you'll be able to feel that first and then eventually you'll get to the point where you'll be able to take an action where you can feel fear while you're doing it.

18.6. Problems with seeking advice from others who have not worked through the same issue themselves

**Mary** : I had a couple of questions, Alwyn. One was, you said you had some confidence doing this and something changed. Did you go back and discover what had changed, what event happened that made you change?

**Participant** : I was talking to someone who was working with me and they were talking about that I had to feel what was in my body and that sometimes I was using fear to not feel my fear in a way, to not get to stuff and it just somehow put me off kilter...

Can I ask who did that?

**Participant** : It was someone here and I don't want to...

Oh right, a therapist who you were going to see.

**Participant** : Yes.

Can I suggest to you whoever that was, and I don't mean to offend the person who it was, who is obviously here, but she has no idea. And I've probably already told her she has no idea.

**Participant** : It might have been my interpretation of it rather than them. It's not necessarily them.

Yes but you know what we find with most therapists? They have a deep desire to keep you away from your fear because one of the reasons why many therapists choose therapy is because they're afraid and they don't want to address it.

Now Peter came to me yesterday and had a chat with me about an issue that he was facing and he had got some advice from somebody else who has exactly the same problem in a larger degree than what Peter has, and that person gave him advice which at the time Peter accepted. And I said to Peter, "The person who advised you, he has the problem worse than you do." Now how can he who can't see his own problem, how can he accurately advise you what the problem is? He can't even see his own problem, so how can he advise you what your problem is? He's not going to advise you accurately on your problem. Now what we see a lot of therapists doing, is not accurately advising people about their problems. A lot of therapists want to lead the person down a certain path because they have spirits with them leading the person away from their emotions, not into them. They view that as a success and it's not success. [00:32:37.23]

**Participant** : I've had confidence in this person and they have helped me with stuff.

Of course. There are things they will be able to help you with but they'll only be the things that they themselves have personally dealt with to a degree. So any therapist you go to is going to be able to help you as long as they don't have the same problem. And the problem is that many of the therapists do have the same problem so they cannot help you with those particular things.

Now what I'm suggesting to you is that many therapists have a large degree of fear so they often do not help people with fear, and I find quite frequently do not. I've only ever had one therapist who helped me with fear and do you know what, the three or four months that I went to him, he never said a word to me. He'd just say, "Get on the table," I'd get on the table, two hours later, "Get off the table." And he never spoke any other time. He never suggested anything to me, he never made any suggestions, he never did anything. And you know what I felt from that? He had an intention for me to go through whatever came up.

**Mary** : When you're receiving therapy - you can't push through the layer you're at; you have to feel the layer that you're at. So if someone is advising you to push through what you're doing rather than experience what you're doing, it can't help. That resistance can't leave your soul unless you feel it.

So the reason why Corny started the healing group thing was because a lot of the ideas about therapy that are on the planet today don't help people, that's why people go back to them over and over again for years and years and years. They don't actually help - many of them don't. The only way a person can truly help you on an issue with fear is if they've dealt with all of their fear. And how many people on the planet have done that? Zero and that includes myself. Zero.

So I am not going to be able to help other people in certain areas. Now of course I've dealt with lots of my fear and the stuff that's left, a lot of it is about my identity, about being Jesus and my memories about what I used to do in the spirit world. You don't have all of those things to deal with so there's a high likelihood that I'll be able to help you with most of your fears. But I can't help you with everything because I haven't dealt with everything. And that applies to everyone. The only person who can help you with everything is God. And the only thing you can do is to trust that process with God, trust that process with God.

18.7. Working through issues by examining what occurred when the issue started

**Mary** : If I can just explain why I asked you that question, it was very good what we talked about in terms of therapy but it's something that you can do to help yourself. If you felt that you were in a place, and this goes for everyone, where you were feeling more humble, you felt like you were accepting more truth about yourself, you were using your will, you had faith, so you were feeling more positive, even though you felt afraid, you were feeling positive, and then something happens and suddenly you're in this place of self-pity, self-punishment, spirit influence, external judgement, addictions, seeking confirmation, where everything feels terrible and you're down on yourself and you've got no faith anymore, go back to what happened.

And what you felt at that time.

**Mary** : What happened and what fear you avoided at the time because when you deal with that, that same trigger can never send you into this downward spiral again.

Can I just also say, Alwyn, I feel like, similar to Avarna, you've made steps that other people here have not yet made and that is that you are very self-aware when it comes to your fear and aware of the ways that you avoid it. A lot of people, just like I was five years ago, are like, "I'm not afraid." A lot of people still feel that even though they might intellectually say, "Yeah, yeah, I've got fear." I can feel that you know it; you know it that you've got fear, so that's a good thing; it's a step in the right direction.

So stop seeing it as a step in the wrong direction. It's very, very good that you're now aware of a lot of things that you weren't aware of before. And while you've been aware of your fear prior to meeting us, you probably haven't been aware of all the ways you've used to avoid it, or all the ways you've used to control it, or all the ways you've used to have a happy life and while it's inside of you. Now you are. So this is very good. [00:37:43.22]

**Mary** : And you're also learning a very valuable lesson about what happens when you avoid a fear. It opens you up to a whole lot of negative things and if you can retrace your steps emotionally to that point where everything started to go pear shaped... and I'll often say that to people, what happened in the relationship where suddenly things went from feeling like they were progressing to now they feel like everything's stagnant and we feel terrible or in your own progress? Whatever it is, go back and find what is the thing that I skipped. There is always a thing that you skipped and dealing with that will not only ensure that that same trigger doesn't lead you to self-pity, self-punishment, spirit influence, external judgement, addictions, seeking confirmation and so forth, it'll help you in a lot of other situations.

19. An example of a participant who had a relationship with an over-cloaked woman

Let's go for a guy this time, we've had a lot of girls.

**Participant** : Sometimes I feel both but I am a guy.

You feel that you're a girl? (Laughs) Is that what you're saying?

**Participant** : A lot of those questions from the ladies relate to me.

They do, many of the men in the audience are completely detuned from all of their fears however their fears are often very different to a woman's fears.

**Participant** : Yeah, which comes to my question. Some time ago I experienced a relationship with a person, which we would call a walk in. She thought she was an ET. And my question is, I had a relationship with this person and I want to know what the causal emotions are for me because I look at her as an effect in my life. I basically had enough of relationships at this time in my life and I went celibate ...

And you almost decided you weren't going to have any more relationships for the rest of your life?

**Participant** : Yeah, my best mate thought I was gay and suggested I go down that track. And no I just can't do that, I knew I was heterosexual. So I did some ceremonies and did the natural love praying that I only wanted my soulmate, and many, many months later this lady turned up.

Whom you thought was your soulmate at the time?

**Participant** : Well she thought I was her soulmate.

So she used the right terminology and everything.

**Participant** : Yeah interesting, AJ. I didn't find her physically attractive but I found there was something in her that drew me closer to her.

Of course.

**Participant** : And we ended up entering a physical relationship later on as well. This is the key point; she was the most developed person in love that I've ever met in my entire life, in twenty-seven years of trying to find out what this is about, being on the planet. The only person who I've ever met in my entire life who's more developed in love that she is is you. I believe in hindsight that she's helped me find Divine Truth, find you I guess. Out of all the people that she could channel and communicate with in her journal writing, which was thousands of pages, she talked about you, Jesus, more than anyone else. But she was in communication with some pretty out there beings from the Arcturian realms.

So she believed she was an ET.

**Participant** : At the beginning of our relationship, yeah. And then she told me some things about Chris, who is the person who came to Earth through the normal channel. She was incarnated and Chris gave her permission for her to take over her body. So when I met her she was Eyeshe.

**Mary** : So who is Chris?

So her first name was Chris?

**Participant** : Chris was the female girl.

That's her, that's how she was born. And then there was this Eyeshe. So Chris gave her permission to enter, is that what you're saying?

**Participant** : Yeah the way she worded it was through the Christ Consciousness grid system, Chris gave her permission to enter her body because Chris didn't want to be here anymore. When I met her she was all Eyeshe, I didn't know anything about Chris. And it was six years after the transference happened when I met her.

And did you ever find out during your relationship anything to do with Chris? [00:42:58.19]

**Participant** : Yes through the ex-husband and the daughter I found out a little bit.

So nothing from her?

**Participant** : Oh yes she was quite open to talking about Chris's life.

Okay, gotcha.

A participant had a relationship with a woman named Chris, who was over-cloaked by a spirit called Eyeshe, and who believed she was an extra-terrestrial

So what's the question?

**Participant** : I'm trying to keep it short but it's a whopper. It's a whopper burger, you know. (Laughter)

Well it's already a whopper experience so I get that.

**Participant** : I can't get my mouth around it. The question is she wasn't afraid. Like you display so much of a lack of fear, and that really what rocked my world, how she could present herself in public and do and say and stand up for everything she said. She didn't believe that she'd been here before and I felt that she'd maybe died as a baby.

Yeah, actually as a miscarriage.

**Participant** : Yes. So my question is what was in my soul that attracted this woman in my life? In my prayers, I was asking, on the New Age path I would like to experience the highest divinity of the feminine aspect being.

Well you got that didn't you? (Laughter)

**Participant** : I felt like, it was a rollercoaster. I did get that definitely. I don't know where she is now, obviously we are not together. That was a long time ago.

The reality is that there are some terrible things happening with her and her life and with Chris of course. And the fact is that 'Eyeshe' is not as loving as what you believe her to be. The reality is that she fed most of your addictions. And in doing so made you feel like she was the most loving female that you'd ever met. And this is one of the reasons why you attracted her. You attracted a spirit, Eyeshe, who was willing to over-cloak a person on Earth, Chris. Chris of course was willing to engage the process because Chris didn't want to live on Earth anyway, so this person who was actually Chris absconded; she left herself to the extent that she allowed this Eyeshe to over-cloak her. Now this is because Chris didn't want to feel a lot of emotions, she didn't want to feel a lot of her life, a lot of the experiences that she was having, she didn't want to feel almost everything about her life. As a result she didn't want to be even in her own body and this allowed her to allow this spirit, Eyeshe, to over-cloak her to such an extent. [00:45:53.19]

By the way I wouldn't say that this spirit is loving. The spirit is a spirit who is willing to over-cloak another person. She gained permission, that is true. When I say gained permission, Chris did not want to live in her own body, so that automatically means the spirit felt she had permission to take over the use of the body. But a spirit in a good space of love would never choose to do such a thing.

**Mary** : They would want to help the person know why they don't want to live in their body.

That's right. So they'd never choose to do such a thing. So Eyeshe is not in a good space of love. However she would have heard your prayer, and she was perfectly happy to support every one of your addictions which would of made you feel pretty good in that moment. And even though you weren't physically attracted, eventually you entered a sexual relationship based on all the other things that you felt.

19.1. Addictions in the participant that were met by the spirit

This is where your issues get highlighted here. So your issues are what was she doing that made you feel she was the highest of the female divinity that you've ever met. What did she do to make you feel that way? Do you remember?

**Participant** : She made me feel special. She believed that I was very open as a man; I was quite open to learning new truths.

So she honoured your character. Okay. What did she do?

**Participant** : She believed that I was grounding her because she hadn't experienced an Earth-bound body before and that by using the Kundalini experience and the sexual practice that I was grounding her. In exchange she was teaching me unconditional love.

Whoa.

**Participant** : I know it's out there, I'm just telling you the beginning of the relationship.

No, it's not out there. Just hear what you said. It's not that it's out there. This is exactly what was happening. However can you see her version of unconditional love was a bartering system with you. [00:48:32.06]

**Mary** : Because you had to give her something. She was saying, "You're doing this for me, Alan, so I'm going to do that for you." That's barter, isn't it?

That's not unconditional love.

**Participant** : Yeah when I look back at it, through the process she didn't feel that I was her soulmate and I felt the same but I didn't know what the journey was about.

And you'd been fed a whole heap of natural love stuff and whole heap of New Age things and who knows after all of that what you believe, a lot of times. So you just go along with the experience a lot of the times.

**Participant** : Yeah. There are many things I could say but it's ...

Yeah so what else did you feel? So you felt you were doing her a service? I don't mean that in a rude way, like a sexual service, you felt you were doing her a favour?

**Mary** : Or even more than that she was saying to Alan, "You're special; you are doing these amazing things."

**Participant** : Oh she never actually said it in words, no. I just felt because a prayer had been answered that I felt special feelings about me.

You were doing the woman a favour basically. That's what she was telling you.

**Mary** : But implicit in that was also the fact that she was in a higher condition than you and you accepted that.

You accepted that she was in a higher condition than you.

**Participant** : By how she displayed herself with other people.

**Mary** : Didn't she say to you, I'm actually giving you the gift of unconditional love?

**Participant** : Yeah, later on in the relationship she wanted to know why we came together, she felt that it was always a purpose and that's what she felt it was. She didn't feel she was actually here to serve people, she felt she was here to serve mother Earth.

**Mary** : I suppose in everything that you're saying that you and she accepted that she was in a higher condition of love than you.

**Participant** : Oh definitely, yes.

**Mary** : So that's part of what's going on in this relationship.

You thought and felt that the woman was better than you.

**Participant** : Yes more evolved in knowledge and love yeah.

I don't feel that she led you to Divine Truth, by the way. I must say that. However there were a lot of things happening here that were about your addictions and a co-dependency based on addictions which you have since also engaged with other relationships. The same kind of things, actually. So this is telling you the feelings that you have that you don't want to feel. The fact is that you want to feel special from a woman, but you don't. The fact is that you want a woman to honour your character but you don't feel they do, you don't feel most women do that. You feel that you're a good man doing the woman a service of some kind, a favour. You think that's a good thing.

**Mary** : That you have a special role.

You need to do that.

**Participant** : An exchange of some kind.

You need to do that and you also have this thought quite frequently that any person that you choose to be with is in a better condition than you are. And as a result, you're quite easily led by women. A woman can tell you something and you feel like you have to consider it. If a man tells you something you go, maybe, maybe not. If a woman tells you something, you go it's probably true before you even analyse what's being said. [00:52:08.15]

**Participant** : Yeah, I get that.

**Mary** : I can see one other common factor. Being chosen.

Yep, being chosen.

**Mary** : You're not choosing, someone's choosing you.

This is also a common factor in your relationships even now, other people choose you, you don't actually make the choice.

**Participant** : Yes definitely.

So if you have a look at all of these things, this tells you the list of unfelt emotions that you actually have that cause this attraction, which I don't actually feel has been beneficial for her or you, it just fed your addictions and fed hers. It fed the spirit's addictions and it fed yours. It even fed Chris's addictions even though Chris wasn't even aware so much of what was going on because all of her addictions are getting fed by the Eyeshe spirit. So the whole thing was all about feeding addictions. And in fact most New Age practices are pretty much all about feeding addictions. [00:53:10.12]

**Participant** : Yeah I'm more aware of that now because of your teachings.

So when we look at all of what's going on, the key for you now is to examine the similarities between this and every other relationship you've ever been in because in the end it is a relationship, even though it was with a spirit who was taking over somebody's body, it's still a relationship. It's very similar to every other relationship you've been in. You've wanted these addictions – feeling special, having the woman honour your character, doing the woman a favour, feeling the woman is more evolved and feeling chosen - and when you've not liked the relationship it's because you didn't feel one of these things. In fact the one reason why you wanted to have no relationships at all was because you didn't believe a woman was capable of feeling any of these things.

**Participant** : Yeah definitely.

So again if we look at it from this perspective, of love, truth, humility, faith and will. There is so much fear in you about these issues that you'd rather have the addiction met than have the fear exposed and you're even willing to do it with a person whom you're not sexually attracted to. So it is very interesting how strong these addictions must be to actually overcome the lack of sexual attraction. They're so strong in you that they overcome the lack of sexual attraction and you actually engage sexually even though there is a lack of sexual attraction. That's how strong these addictions are.

**Participant** : And pandering to the female. I'll get an addiction met here if I pander to them.

**Mary** : Can I just also before you go into this - point out Alan, that you haven't yet even realised that there an addiction. There are still elements inside of you of this relationship that you feel are good and loving and should be a part of a loving relationship. If you want to grow towards God and heal yourself in love and actually have your soulmate relationship be really beautiful, it's going to require examining each of these addictions and saying, "Is that really loving or is that something that I'm avoiding in this interaction in this emotional exchange?"

So if you look at some of these addiction, for example about being chosen, it's about you not wanting to have to make the choice yourself. It's about having a lack of personal responsibility when it comes to relationships. So with every single one of these addictions, feeling special, honoured, doing the woman a favour, feeling I felt woman more evolved, being chosen, something is going on inside of yourself where you want an addiction met, and this spirit is seeing all of these addictions. Remember a spirit can see all of the colours of every addiction and they know exactly what these addictions mean. All they have to do is feed every one of those addictions and you'll feel like you're the most loved person on the planet. [00:56:01.15]

**Participant** : And I did at the time. I feel I've manufactured most of them because of the lack of love that I had in my childhood from my mother.

I agree. And this is all about stuff that you didn't feel when you were a child.

**Participant** : Yeah that's right.

But as Mary pointed out to you just now, and I don't think you really truly have got it, you still believe all of these addictions are good. You still want them all. And each relationship you've engaged since, you engaged at the beginning because you thought you had each of those things and then after a while you've realised, oh maybe I haven't. But each time you've always sought these particular things and in fact these things prevent you from identifying your soulmate.

**Participant** : And I feel they take me away from my true self.

They do, greatly, yes. Of course.

**Participant** : I'm just becoming more aware of that now.

19.2. Tying in the five basics required for progression towards God with the addictions driving the relationship

So if we look at using again the exercise of your will here, see if I had faith that I needed to deal with my emotions and find my emotions, and I had the humility to do so, can you see that whenever you felt special with a woman you'd go, "Oh this is interesting because this is one of my addictions." And you wouldn't want to meet this addiction anymore, you'd go, "There's something wrong here, I'm feeling attractive because she's making me feel special. It's not necessarily because I'm sexually attracted to her and I'm attracted to her other qualities and other attributes, it's basically because she's making me feel something that I desperately need to feel and I don't feel able to feel without her in fact."

This is where it's imperative that you're truthful with yourself, and I don't feel you are being truthful with yourself even now. As Mary's pointed out, you're aware that this is what's happened but you're not truthful with yourself about the actual addictions that have driven it. You still see many of these things as good things. You still see many of these as things that you're seeking for in a relationship, not being aware that these are actually telling you what your addictions are all about. You're willing to engage in a relationship with a person who might not even be there and has been over-cloaked in order to have many of these things met.

So what happens in this case is the spirit notices you with all of these injuries, and she goes, okay, it's going to be really easy to have a relationship with this guy. All I've got to do is make him feel special, honour his character, show him how he's doing me a favour and honour that, honour the favour that's happening and all I've got to suggest to him is his perhaps not quite as evolved as myself and that's why he doesn't really know what his attractions are, and also make him feel like he's been chosen by me for a certain purpose and that's going to make him feel really good about himself, something that he wouldn't normally feel. And if I'm a woman spirit and I do all that for you, you'll fall over backwards; you'll even spread your legs as the saying goes, from a female perspective. You'll even go to bed with them as a result.

**Participant** : Yeah, that lack of love sells the soul out pretty short.

Exactly. And this is indicating to you actually that there is a lack of self-love, a deep lack of self-love inside of yourself. That's the main reason. And instead of being humble to this feeling inside of yourself you're using your will to engage relationships in order to have the other person fulfil the lack of self-love.

**Participant** : And has this damaged my soul more? Exercising down that path?

Of course. Now when you say damage your soul more, of course most of the damage has occurred when you were in your childhood years, when all of this damage entered you, now you're making choices and decisions based upon it. And the choices and decisions you're making based upon it are just acting out the damage that's already there. My suggestion is to stop acting out the damage that is already there and now start repairing the damage, which will take you having a lot more strength of character in this regard than you've had before.

But it's a very interesting example that you brought up because you can see how spirits can interfere with the entire process so much just to feed our addictions - we often see that happening.

**Mary** : It's also really interesting I feel for a lot of us. Remember earlier I was saying to Karen how I used to believe the absence of fear was me feeling loved and happy, and I realise now that wasn't real at all, that was just me avoiding some stuff and I felt a bit relaxed and relieved. And as I pointed out to you Alan, a lot of these things you still have a feeling inside when you get them, "Oh I'm being loved."

**Participant** : I was getting a good feeling from it, yeah.

**Mary** : And this is where I feel us becoming more self-aware, eventually we begin to feel when an addiction is being met, eeww, that feels a bit icky.

It doesn't feel like love anymore.

**Mary** : But for a long time in our life it can feel like love and it requires self-reflection and really becoming more sensitive to ourselves to start to discern, "Am I getting something met here or is this actually feeling unconditional?" So it's good for all of us to recognise that maybe we don't actually know what love is yet.

**Participant** : Definitely, yeah.

19.3. Issues of self-love make us suggestible to poor advice

When we have issues of self-love too, if I can point this out, issues of self-love cause us to believe that other people are of greater development than they actually are. So we then become very susceptible to being influenced by other people when we believe ourselves to lack development in self-love and we believe other people to be better developed in love. The problem with that is we become very suggestible. In other words a person only has to make a suggestion to us and before we know it, we're doing what they've suggested. Even if it's out of harmony with these particular qualities of love, truth, humility, faith and will, we still go ahead and do it. [01:02:40.01]

19.4. Problems with seeking advice from others who have not worked through the same issue themselves (continued)

**Mary** : Can I say that, Alwyn, really that this is something that happened to you; someone suggested something to you and it sent you into this self-doubt and allowed a lot of self-punishment to come in.

Which is an indication of how suggestible you are.

**Mary** : Yeah, I was speaking to someone else yesterday and they had the same situation. They felt they were growing in something, they felt they were making more actions in harmony with truth and less addiction and they got feedback from someone to say that they were horribly in addiction. And I said well who gave you this advice, do you see them reflecting in their life qualities that you would like to have? If they're giving you advice about a relationship, are they even in a relationship and if they are, is it a happy one? Because if they're not, it's not really even logical is it? It's sort of like asking a kid in the first year of school to teach me handwriting. You know, he's just learning himself. We could get together and maybe experiment together but if I start taking all my cues from him and he's still learning how to form an A, my A's are going to start to look a bit shonky themselves. My A's do look a bit shonky... (Laughs)

English is not our first language. (Laughter) We don't have a third language either which is a problem. Mary does, but I don't.

**Mary** : I'm not very good in them either. So what was I saying? Just about being open to the suggestion of people who maybe don't have our best interests at heart because they're trying to get an addiction met through the exchange.

Oftentimes too they don't know they don't have our best interests at heart, so look at their life. If a person who's advising you of how to stay together in your marriage, or work through marital issues and the person is not in a relationship themselves that's happy, then how can they advise you to work through issues? It's obvious their attraction is showing them that they're either not in a relationship or they're not in a relationship that's happy, so they really are not capable of giving you appropriate advice, ever, actually, until they go through the process of having a relationship themselves and working through the issues that cause it to not be happy. Until it becomes a happy relationship or if you notice they're in an addictive relationship, feeding each other's addictions, and they're giving you advice, all they can really do is give you advice of how to meet each other's addictions. That's all they can do. They can't do anything else for you. So be very careful about accepting advice aside from the advice the Law of Attraction is bringing you.

19.4.1. Receiving truth from God through God's Laws

Remember the Law of Attraction is God's Law, the Law of Cause and Effect is God's Law, and these laws are giving you the right advice. A person coming along and speaking to you may be giving you the right advice or may be in error, depending on what they themselves have dealt with in their life. Depending on their personal situation and depending on what growth they have made, they may be able to give you advice but this is where it's difficult on Earth compared to the spirit world because in the spirit world you see the brightness of the individual giving you the advice. Therefore you'll be able to go, "Okay, I'm pretty dark and he's pretty bright so it's probably worth listening to him." But here on Earth because we can't feel love as God transmits it, in other words we don't feel God's Love, we have an addictive relationship with love. In other words we believe, as you pointed out Alan, that certain things are love when they're actually not. All of us on Earth who have this problem - we believe that certain things are love when it's not. So then we assume as a result of that that the person is more loving when they're not. [01:06:34.23]

The only person who we could really compare that with is God at the end of the day. What would God do in our situation? Then once we know that comparison or understand that comparison, we'll be able to determine who is as loving or who's bright. If we can feel God's Love and feel the person at the same time, then it's highly likely we'll have a fairly accurate viewpoint of the individual. But if we're not feeling God's Love at the same time we're feeling a person then it's highly unlikely that our interpretation of what we're feeling from a person is accurate. And this is the main problem that many of us have. So what we would suggest is, focus first on this relationship with God, focus first on attempting to at least try to feel God, feel Love from God, feel what it's flavour is, what it feels like and then when you feel that kind of love from another person on Earth then you can be a bit more open to the advice they give you.

However if all you feel is an addictive type of a love, where they're feeding all of your emotions and feeding all of your addictions and you think you're happy and they're happy and everything is going great, but obviously it doesn't feel real and all those kind of things, and you can't feel God when you're in that relationship, if that's the case then I'd be very suspicious of believing that it's love and I would also be very suspicious of the advice the person gives you because the advice they're giving you is going to be based on their perception, not the truth.

If the person, through their personal example, is not demonstrating in their personal life that they have made changes in these particular areas that you're looking to make changes, then why would you gain their advice? It doesn't make any sense because they need advice from someone else on the subject as much as you do, or even perhaps more than you do.

Our suggestion there would be again, go back to God and look at the people around you who actually have a developed relationship that you want to have. A developed relationship with God that you would like to have. A developed relationship with their partner that you would like to have. A developed relationship with their friends, with family, with people in general with the way in which they treat people all over the world. Look at a person like that and then say, well that's the kind of person I can receive advice from if I want to become like that. That's our suggestion.

20. Closing words

Well it's time for us to finish. So hopefully you've enjoyed that little session of answering a lot of your questions. It's hopefully helped a bit with understanding how these things – love, truth, humility, faith and will - can be put into practice in practical situations. And probably what we'll be doing is talking more about those particular things. When we do have question and answer sessions in the future, a lot of our focus is going to be pulling people back to these basic qualities that need to be developed and then looking at what are the primary blockages to developing these qualities in practical situations. The majority of the time you're going to find we'll be speaking about fear. So if you didn't get a lot of the things about today's discussion in terms of your personal life then I'm sure there'll be many more questions asked by different groups that will be able to help you do that.

**Mary** : Thanks for your time everyone. (Applause)

Thanks for your donations again guys and also I don't know when we will see all of you next, so we'd like to wish you well with this – love, truth, humility, faith and will in the development of your character if we can do that. Thanks guys. (Applause)

