 
My Name is Chaos

A production by TwoLoveBirds

Published by Smashwords

Copyright 2019 TwoLoveBirds

All Rights Reserved

Cover Design by TwoLoveBirds

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, trademarked products, events, and locations are fictitious or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual events or persons, living or dead, are entirely coincidental.

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of these authors.

My Name is Chaos
Chapter One

"Hey kid," was his brilliant introduction. He was thick-set, bearded with long blond hair, and freshly into his thirties. A bit young for a trucker, but looking the part with his checkered red and black hunting jacket and camouflage hunting cap. He was taller than me by a head. Or two.

He looked left and right. The first few dregs of snow were starting to flutter down from the sky through the darkness, but they weren't staying on the ground. Or on the pine trees for that matter. Pine trees that stretched on forever, like the columns of hell lining the road in every direction.

I should have been intimidated, I guess. A teenager all alone on the highway, no jacket in the cold, but hell. I saw plenty of people like him on their way passing through my home. Like, I probably knew half of his secrets just by guessing with my dice. So all I said back was "Hey," and stuffed my hands in my jeans pockets.

"Listen, I don't know what got you here, or what trouble you're into," he said, gesturing to me as if that explained something. "But you can hitch a ride with me. Okay, kid?"

Ah, a decent soul salvaging the poor, lost, child. I sneered, hands fingering the dice in my pockets. "You don't know a thing about me."

He sighed, breath puffing the air between us. "I know I don't. But come on kid, the temperature is dropping and you don't even have a jacket. Get in the truck. Where you going? I promise I'm not a creeper."

I promise this, I promise that. I almost rolled my eyes – woops, I did. How many people had I heard with their fancy promises? And they all went away, not where they'd expected to go.

But the wind blew. It was icy cold. Canada. Damned place. I could have picked somewhere warmer. The guy pleaded with me. "Come on, you can't expect to make it far! The next town is at least an hour's drive away! And I'm sorry, but no one's going to pick you up looking like that!"

Looking like what? I looked myself over. Thick combat-style boots. Jeans. Black t-shirt. Chains and spikes and the tips of my mullet hanging across my chest. Okay, maybe having orange and black hair wasn't a wise choice. "Is it the hair?" I asked, suddenly feeling a splinter of ... self consciousness? Was that what that was called?

"No kid, though I didn't know mullets were making a come back," he chuckled. With one thick arm he gestured to his truck. "Come on, get in. It's warmer in there."

Fine. Fine! Just because this place was blasted cold and – whatever! Did I care if he got in my way? No. So plans be damned, (whatever went right in my life anyways?) I stomped forward, muttering under my breath "Fine, fine, fine."

Okay, but the guy had a point. It really was warmer in his giant truck cabin. As the semi rolled forward, he pulled a fleece-lined checkered jacket (red and green and white) out from behind the seats and held it at me. "Here. Bundle up."

Grudgingly feeling my sense of fashion take a hit, I bundled into it. Ohhh, so warm. Almost like home. Almost.

The windshield wipers began their battle against the thickening snow. He turned the radio on, and tinny music began to play. No metal? Ugh. I slunk down in my seat, arms wrapped around myself and face buried in the soft fleece. They should make these things in black.

"So!" he slapped the giant steering wheel. "What's your name? I'm Mark."

What a typical name. "I'm Chaos," I sneered.

He laughed good -naturedly. "Really eh? That's what people call you?"

"They also call me 'Bringer of Doom' 'First Horseman', and 'Little Jerk'," I grumbled, snuggling deeper into the humongous jacket.

"Well now that's not nice," he said gently. "How about we call you – Chris?"

"I'm gender-neutral," I said sharply. "I don't do single-gender names."

"Oh," and his voice softened as if he understood something. His eyes stayed on the road though. "That why you're on the street now?"

"No," I grumbled.

He hummed approval and nodded. I slunk further down in the seat, as far as I could go. But I kept my eyes on the road, peeling them for anything out of the ordinary. But damn, there were so many pine trees!

"How about Fuzzy McWuzz?" he said suddenly with a broad grin. "Huh? That's gender neutral."

"It's Chaos," I said flatly, trying not to laugh at the face my dad would make if someone called me 'Fuzzy'.

"Chaos can be fuzzy," he said with a laugh.

"Then I'll call you Thor," I said dryly. "Because you look like the movie of him."

"Oh do I?" He made a show of taking off his cap and brushing back his long blond hair. "Is that a compliment?"

I looked away, smiling dryly. He was kind of handsome, I admitted secretly to myself.

It was when I was looking away, right then, that I saw them. Insect-like and humanoid all at the same time, with a smattering of booger-essence to them. They were crawling out of the forest, eyes glowing a deep green.

"We've got company," I said dryly.

"Huh, what?" He looked around, checking all his mirrors. He didn't see them until it was too late. They were jumping onto the sides of his truck, their insect hand-bits or whatever the fuck they're called were sinking into the metal, gouging their way along.

"Oh," he muttered under his breath. "Okay, but, you know they probably won't come to the cockpit. This has happened to me a few times. They're just trying to hitch a ride to the next town."

"No, they're not," I said dryly. "They're here for me."

Mark McThor gave me a look. "Oh," he said softly, perhaps afraid. "You're one of them."

"Wrong again," I said with perhaps a note of cheer. Then I swung the door open and jumped out.

Thud! I sort of landed on the asphalt mix squishy dirt and – you guessed it – rolled straight into the icy ditch half-filled with water and goop. I swear, I rose to my feet with a cattail poking up from my hair. That's it. Now I'm going down as 'Ye Olde Deity of the Cattails', just watch. Ugh.

Slugging my way out of the ditch I stepped towards the demonic beasts that were jumping off the truck and scuttling towards me. With one hand I dragged mud and friggin' cattails from my hair, with the other I drew my dice. It glowed red and blue faintly as I tossed it up into the air. It landed on my palm, a perfect 20.

"Good job," I said, congratulating myself on my future kills.

"Kid!" The truck backed up faster than it should have, squishing three of the demons. "Get back in here!" The thing veered dangerously across the road and screeched to a stop with the cabin before me, on the other side of the road. McThor Mark-face was yelling. "Get here! They're going to eat you alive!"

I shook my hands and my black double blades snapped out of my bracelets at my command. "Just watch!" I said proudly as the demon-cum-vampire spawn encircled me.

"Dammit kid!" roared McThor, slamming shut his cabin door as a spawn tried to get up there and eat him. "You're not a superhero!"

I paused. Hadn't he seen my badass blades? Probably not, as they were black and the whole friggin' world was dark right now. Lights were sort of out.

But then the monsters launched at me. First was the biggest, the tinier fly-like ones arriving after like an angry swarm of wasps, if wasps were a breed of bugs mixed with pigs.

My instincts kicked in. I spun, blades slashing. Dark blood gushed everywhere, spattering across me as I hacked and slashed mercilessly at the fray.

And then there was no more. I stood there, breathless, surrounded by vanquished corpses. Oh yeah. This was a great feeling. Victory. Alea jacta est. Good stuff.

Then, there was the roaring of a chainsaw. Marc came thundering around the truck, chainsaw held aloft.

I startled, raising my blades. "Whoah!" I yelped. "Calm down! See- look? All done with."

He drew to a stop, brain adjusting to the view before him. The chainsaw puttered above him. His eyes grew 'yuge' and then fixed upon me. Proud, I puffed up, expecting him to wither at my feet in fear. It's what people did for my dad.

But instead he lowered the chainsaw and grinned as the motor puttered off. "You're something else, aren't you?"

I grinned. "Entirely." But uh, no withering at my feet? No?

He stepped over the mess and clapped me on the shoulder. "Come on then, kiddo, let's get back on the road before more of 'em come." And he hauled me forward, big beefy hand on my shoulder.

I was dismayed. No withering?

I   
was back in the truck cabin, the wipers going a mile a minute against the snow, and Mark talking – slower? I mean, he wasn't talking that fast and neither was he driving that fast, what with the fresh snow and ice.

"Look," he said for the umpteenth time. "All I'm saying, is that you can't just go running around chopping at vampire spawns."

I rolled my eyes and huffed, dropping my chin into my palm. "Like you know anything. You don't know a thing about me."

"Okay, yeah, well, point taken. But besides that, you're still a kid. I'm the adult here. And I'm saying that you just can't run around recklessly like that. You're going to get hurt." He leveled me a look full of worry. I scoffed.

"Thor," I started.

He cut me off. "Now what if there had been more of them? What if they'd gotten you from behind? Huh? You thought of that?"

"I knew how many there were," I drawled, thinking that hey, he actually had a point. I was lucky there hadn't been too many of them.

"Life isn't a video game," he said, tapping a hand on the steering wheel. "Sometimes the big trouble just comes running at you, no preparation!"

Uh, yeah, I know. "I actually don't play a lot of video games," I said proudly. "I spend more time doing things."

"Yeah, well, good," he grumbled. "But you still can't do that sort of thing!" See? He was repeating himself. So I repeated myself too. It's usually how I won these kinds of arguments.

"But you don't know anything about me!" I snapped back. "So how can you judge? Huh?"

He gave me a once over. I felt smug. Yeah, don't I look badass? I'm totally-

"You're from money," he said flatly. "And you think you own the world."

My jaw fell. Well that, that – wasn't what I'd hoped to put across? I looked down at myself, plucking at my plain black t-shirt. How did he get that out of me?

"Your jewelry, kid," he said gently. "No poor person 'round these parts be running around with pentacles and crosses like that. Plus, not many people wear those. Too much like the vampire clans. Are you sure you're not one of them?"

"I'm not a vampire!" I insisted. "Plus, these are symbols of witchcraft and no one group owns that."

"Uh, yeah," he grunted, eyes back on the road. "So you're what, a witch?"

I squirmed in my seat. "Well, I guess. Witchcraft is a pretty broad term, you know. It doesn't mean I go around spilling blood and stuff."

Thor chuckled. "Just seen you spill a lot of blood, kid."

A fact I was proud of! I grinned. "Okay, yes, but that's not witchcraft."

"That's okay, no one cares about religion these days," he said. "I mean, I used to be a bible-thumper right along with the rest of them but hey- the vampires just came up out of nowhere and here we are."

I pursed my lips, fingering my pentacle pendant. "Define 'here we are' from your perspective, why don't you?"

"Christ, kid!" he ogled at me. "Where have you been this past year?"

"Boarding school of hell?" I held up my hands. "I don't know, in a coma? Just – tell it to me from your perspective, okay? I want to know."

He gave me a wary look. And he paused. And he paused. Then, finally, he said "Whose perspective have you heard things from?"

I shrugged and looked away. There wasn't much to see. More snow, more snow, more snow. Even more snow. More pine trees out there to judge your soul.

He snapped his fingers. "You mafia or something? I've heard some gangs have made contacts with the vampires and are friends with them. That your case?"

I gave him a disinterested look. "Look, all I'm saying is that my dad has a lot of power." There. Now will he quiver at my feet? I kind of really wanted him to quiver.

No such luck. He seemed relieved. "So mafia then. And you quit or something? I'm guessing, if you're out here on your own."

I shrugged. I wasn't answering that question. Leave him with his illusions... for now.

"Well!" he thumped the wheel with a palm. "Let me tell you the real version!"

Oh yeah! With a grin I settled back and watched him. He really was cute.

"It all started one bright, sunny, afternoon day. I was out truckin', and then the radio starts having these prank calls on it! 'Help, help, there's vampires overrunning my neighborhood!'" He snorted and half-laughed. "We all thought it was hilarious. Mind you, people used to be worried about a zombie apocalypse. They thought this was funny. Then, you know – or maybe you don't? The army was called in. It was a full-out seige in some places. I mean, where the hell did they come from? Anyways, now they've got syndicates and their own quarters and we have to live next to them, so long as they don't step out of their territories. Everyone knows they don't, I mean you saw those suckers down the street – it's just a matter of time until we're back at war with them!"

How adaptabe human beings are, I thought. Making treaties and trade partnerships with blood-sucking fiends from hell. Huh.

Absent-mindedly, I kicked my booted feet up on the dashboard.

"Hey get your feet down!" he waved a hand at me. Rolling my eyes, I did, just because I was starting to like him.

Then, I was plunged in my thoughts. He left me to them, often blinking and swallowing. I frowned as we drove on and on. This changed nothing in my plans. It didn't even derail or change their direction. Everything my dad had told me was holding true. So why had everyone thought I couldn't do this?

"Oh, hey," Marc MacThor pointed ahead. "See that?"

I squinted. There was so much snow. But beyond the snow that assaulted the windshield, there was lights. A roadblock. People milling around. A gang?

Marc slowed the truck down with a grin. "Means we've hit civilization. This is the entry into a safe zone. We just gotta show ID, pass a simple blood test, and we're in! Of course they're going to check the cargo too, but that shouldn't be more'n a few hours. We can have a hot chocolate or something while they do that."

"I drink coffee," I snapped, blood suddenly racing. Blood test? Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh, FUCK.

"Yeah, 'course you do," he said, chuckling. "How old are you anyways? You know you're going to have to explain to them who you are and where you're from, right? Can't keep secrets from the army."

I blanched. The army?

Indeed, as we slowed to a stop at the roadblock, military armored trucks and gear came into view. I'd never seen so many guns in my life, which was saying something. These weren't loaded with bullets, but a special chemical concoction that I'd heard was a, eh, paralyzer? I gulped. Should I run now? I'd have to run hella fast, faster than these cranked-up soldiers.

I mean, I was fast but not that fast. So what now?

I bit the edge of my pentacle pendant. Drew my dice haphazardly from my pocket. What if I fought? It came up with a one facing up. Critical fail.

Well, that was not a good option then. I pocketed it and bit some more at my pendant.

There was talking on Mark's side of the truck. Flashlights were shined in.

"Time to get out!" Mark said cheerfully.

I didn't answer as I pushed the door open and stepped out. Fuck! It was cold. It was freezing! The wind bit at me like a whip and snowflakes snapped across my face. I pulled Mark's coat closer around me as a flashlight was shone in my face.

"ID?" the soldier barked over the wind.

Fingers turning numb in the cold, I fished my slim wallet from my pocket. Dug out a school ID.

"Nunavut?" the soldier said, shocked. "How'd you get down here?"

I gulped. "I'm lucky?" I fibbed. I felt anything but lucky right then.

"Don't be smart, kid. What are you doing here?" The flashlight was still in my face.

"I'm here for a hospital, spinal problems," I fibbed, finally taking my dad's advice and using the story. "I've just been released. Missed my bus to Montreal to get a plane to go home and tried hitchhiking."

The soldier nodded. "That's really dumb of you to hitchhike."

Wow, day one and everyone was calling me dumb. This world and me was not a match. I ducked my head and nodded.

"Over there," they pointed to a small stand with a medical box next to it. Mark was already there, getting his blood drawn.

I shuffled over, pocketing my wallet. My heart was hammering in my throat. How good were their vampire-detection tests? What did they base it off of?

Mark grinned at me. "You're not afraid of needles, are you?"

I snorted. Needles? Please, try me.

Just to prove him wrong, I watched as they jabbed me with the needle and drew my blood out into a vial. Holding it up to a bare light bulb, they swirled the tube.

The moment of truth. I held my breath, noticing Mark watching the tube intently.

It turned red. Bright, bright, glowing, fucking, red.

Mark stared at me in horror, suddenly stepping aside. I sheepishly held up my hands to my shoulders. "I'm not a vampire," I said, which was technically true. Which was why my vial was red, not bright purple as it would have been for a vampire.

Thud! I was shot smack in the chest. And it was lights out for me.

Chapter Two

I came to with a light beaming in my face. Go into the white light, I heard my father whispering.

Hot damn, was I dying?

"Wake up!" barked a soldier, startling me out of my groggy state.

I was in a bare room with a large window leading to nowhere- Ohhhh, an interrogation room. I'd seen these so often in the movies. Now I was actually in one. Well, maybe one day I'll be in my own movie-

"Look here," barked the soldier. He had a deep voice, the obligatory crew cut, and a chiseled jaw. Other than that, he was wearing a black uniform. What was that, the anti-vampire division?

"You're not hot," I informed him with a slur.

He glared at me. With a slap, he pushed my fake ID across the table between us. "Your ID is fake. Explain that."

"Nun ov it?" I sniggered, playing on the over-tired pun of Nunavut's pronounciation. "You sure?"

He gave me a death-ray glare. I sniggered on, and on, and on. Oh look! I could move my arms! I reached up to comb my hair back from my face, only to see they were cuffed together. At least I still had my bracelets on. And yes – I still had my necklaces. Good.

"You're rather young to be used as a mule, aren't you?" he asked.

I sniggered. "You don't know what else I'm too young for-" and then I paused. Didn't mules carry drugs up their butts or something? I gawked out loud, wondering whether I'd been probed. Then, realizing my mouth was open, I slowly closed it.

"Look here, kid," the soldier said, leaning across the table. "You tell us who you are, where you're from, and what species you are. Now."

I whined, kicking my feet lightly against the floor. Dramatically, I threw my head back and groaned. "No-o-o-o," I whined, intoning every sound with gusto. I hated being told what to do! I hated it, I hated it, I hated hated hated-

My eyes snapped open as I caught sight of the jacket that was strewn over the side of my chair. Mark's jacket. "Hey," I said, picking up the fuzzy jacket and half-tossing it across the table. It landed with a flump in the middle, over my ID papers. "That's not mine. It's the trucker's. Give it back to him."

The soldier didn't move.

"It's not mine!" I slurred loudly, flopping back in my chair. "Think I'd wear something like that?" Oops, technically I had been wearing it. But it had been cold, okay? Cold weather ruins fashion.

The soldier just gave me a look. A long moment dragged on. I groaned, dropping my head down to my chest. I felt so groggy. Itchy all over. So weird. Is this why dad never let me try drugs? The world was woozy-

"Let's start simple," the soldier said, pushing the jacket back towards me. "Who is the trucker? The one you were riding with?"

"Mark?" I groaned, not bothering to lift my head. I let my eyes slide closed.

"And who is he?"

I lifted my head. "The fuck would I know? He just gave me a lift."

The soldier gave me a deadpan expression. This guy had so many shades of neutral, it was unbelievable. "Why did he give you a lift?"

"'Cuz it's cold and," I dropped my voice as far as it'd go "Hey kid, it's cold out here. Come ride," I returned to my normal voice "You know. It was snowing!" And fuck this world is cold!

The soldier didn't seem to 'know', 'dig it' or 'vibe' with what I was saying. "So what are you saying?" he asked.

I propped my elbows on the table and leaned forward. "Are you really that stupid?" I whispered loudly. "Do I have to spell everything out for you?"

"Yes," he said coldly.

"He gave me a ride because it was fucking cold!" I yelled in the soldier's face. It had absolutely zero effect. Like, none. Well that was demotivating. I slumped back into my chair, frowning. Usually when I yelled, you know. Shit happened.

Well, the soldier tilted his head to the side. Did that count? "So how do you know Mark?"

I gobbled air like a fish. "I just told you!" I croaked, voice sore from the yell. I sounded hoarse now. "We met on the side of the road."

The soldier blinked. Was my brain less fuzzy now? Was it? How about now?

"Why did he take you into his truck?"

"Huh?" I squinted. What was – in the movies this was faster. More interesting.

"Why, did he, take you, into, his truck?" The soldier repeated with infuriating enunciation. I wanted to throw myself at him and gouge his eyes out. Could I? I reached for my dice – and found my pocket empty.

Oh shit.

I blanched, suddenly feeling cold. Don't be, I told myself, it's just a dice.

But it was my dice!

I looked sourly at the benum sitting across from me. "Okay, what do you want?" I was getting really sick of this.

He didn't seem bored one bit. In fact, he was still in neutral gear, and truth be told it was getting on my nerves. "Start by telling me what you were doing in that truck."

"Hitching a ride?" I asked with a half-laugh. "Dude, we've gone over this already!"

He just sat there. I fidgeted. Patience was not of my many virtues.

And he just sat there. I cocked my head to the side and gawked at him. "Seriously?" I asked. "If you're wasting time-" I shoved the jacket at him. "Bring this back to Mark! Get out of my face!"

The jacket didn't go far. His expression didn't budge. "How much would you say Mark knows about your mission?"

Uh- "I'm not on a mission," I lied feebly. "And Mark, is just some guy who gave me a ride."

He blinked, kind of like a lizard, really. "How lucky of you to get a ride."

I fidgeted. "Well, I'll put 'lucky' on my CV the next time. Crap, man, what the hell-"

He took the jacket and placed it beside him on the desk between us. "Is it important for Mark to get this jacket back?"

"It's his jacket!" I burst. "What- what kind of a question is that?"

He just kept staring me, like an alien on crack or something. I huffed and threw myself back in my chair. It didn't budge. I glared at him. He didn't budge.

I heaved a sigh. "Mark is some sweet, derpy, family-loving guy who gave the 'poor lost kid' a ride. Happy? Come on, that's it."

After a moment I added "I swear, he has nothing to do with this. Okay? Leave him out of this."

The unblinking lizard across from me licked its eyeballs. I wish. No, he really just blinked again.  
In a flash of temper my psychiatrist would call a 'mood swing', I snapped my arm out to grab the jacket.

"Fine, I'm keeping the-" but my arms didn't reach. I jarred to a stop at the end of a chain that was connected to the floor. Waggling my fingers, I still tried to reach. I didn't even brush the fabric.

McSnakeNoExpression just looked from the jacket to me. "Is the jacket important?" he asked.

I dropped my arms into my lap and hung my head back, groaning loudly. "You're dumb!" I declared.

Just then the door open. A woman, slim and fairy-like in her features and with fox-like short hair, stepped in. She was wearing the same black uniform, but with different grade patches and stuff. "I'll take it from here," she said in a surprisingly deep voice. Trans? Maybe?

"Hey gurl," I said, hoping to win brownie points. No points were to be had. She marched over and took the other soldier's seat. He left the room, leaving the jacket at her side.

"My jacket," I said, "Can I-"

"I'm so sorry to be late," she said, talking over me. "But you must understand that the average soldier does not know how to deal with someone of your stature."

Someone of my stature? Oh yeah, I felt right at home now. I grinned, unable to stop myself. Finally, some respect around here.

She smiled, and it was sweet. "Tell me your name?"

"Chaos," I said gruffly.

"Hmm," her eyes narrowed. "Now tell me, Chaos, how well do you know Mark?"

I dropped my hands in my lap and groaned. "Tell me – look, I don't know the guy!"

"Oh," she seemed distracted by that. "That's awfully sad."

I frowned. "Why?"

"Well," she touched the jacket lightly."We've found, questionable, things in his cargo. Care to explain that?"

I blinked. "What?"

She smiled so slightly, and I felt like she was light-years ahead of me in this game. "Do you know who you were riding with?"

I blinked and blinked. Then I shook my head. "Mark is just some guy."

"Some guy smuggling vampire pods into town? Granted, if you hadn't been there we wouldn't have caught them. Now that you were though, we've run his ID and," she shook her head, tapping a finger in the jacket. "It doesn't look very good."

I was baffled. "Mark's a vampire?"

"No," she said sweetly. "But he's part of a gang that works with them." She leaned across the desk, wafting sweet perfume across the table. "The price of which is execution. Now, if you don't want to go down that road with him," she eyed the jacket. "You might want to explain what you were doing in that truck with him."

My heart began racing. Think fast, think fast. But fuck, I was never good at creative writing, or making up stories. "I, uh," I ducked my head. "Was really just getting a ride." Gulp. I fumbled along, staring at the table and trying to make sense of things. "I was on the side of the road and he – he was just – 'come on kid'. He seemed nice." And I shrugged.

"What were you doing on the side of the road? In the middle of the night?" She asked softly. "You don't even have your own jacket."

I gulped. "I don't know," I croaked. "It's, uh, hazy."

"Try to remember," she said so softly, so venemously.

I pressed my lips together. Hung my head lower. "'was in a car," I mumbled, partly ashamed to be making stuff up and partly trying to convince her I was telling the truth. "And there was people? I guess-" and I let it trail away. Then, hesitantly, I added hoarsely "They were touching me." That, that, was not really a lie. I fidgeted, digging back upon painful memories. "I just – they were there and," but how do you describe something like that? "I bit," I lied. I wished I had. You wouldn't think I'd never even bite back, would you? What a failure. "So they threw me out of the car."

I hung my head.

"Were they your relatives?" she asked.

I shifted, wondering where to take my lie. "I don't, remember," I mumbled. "They were wearing black." Yeah, that's useful, right? "I didn't recognize them," I mumbled.

She nodded, but didn't say anything. I pressed my lips together, determined not to say anymore. But now that I was talking, I had to get it out. "They were supposed to be my friends," I said, choking on tears. "But they left me there! And," I gulped, realizing that if I spoke too much I'd make a mess of my statement. "People suck!" I snapped, emotions boiling up.

She nodded again, but it didn't seem to mean anything.

"Whatever," I grumbled, crossing my arms over my chest and glaring at her. I shouldn't have spoken so much. I felt raw now, completely unnerved.

"So how do you know Mark?" she asked again. And just as she said it, an idea came to me. A way to pass myself off as human.

"He's my older brother," I fibbed. "I guess he heard I'd been thrown out of the car and came looking for me."

She nodded, so slowly. I fibbed on. "I, I think that, because of what's happened to me – it could make my blood seem off."

Another nod.

"But I'm human. Like Mark. Please, can't I – be let go? I'm, I'm human." I tried to play the victim as well as I could. Play the sad, hurt, teen. "I promise I have nothing to do with any of this. I just want to go home."

Fuckin' mistake.

"So where is home?" she asked softly.

Oh crap. Crap, crap, fuck. "Uh," I bumbled around in my mind like a blind person flailing around. How the hell would I know where Mark's family lived? "Uh."

She smiled. I gulped.

Fuck.

"So where is home?" She asked tenderly, as if she cared.

"Fuck off," I grumbled. I was caught in my lie. I didn't even know what to say now.

She was smiling like a fox. "Where is it you want to go then?"

I lowered my head. "I don't come from around here." There. Not a lie.

She hummed agreement, nodding. "I know."

I balked. "You know?" Right, she'd mentioned my 'stature', so maybe she knew... I leaned back smugly in my chair. "What do you know?" Come on, tell me the goods.

FoxFace smiled. She leaned forward innocently. "I know you're not from around here." And she lifted a finger to point between my eyes. "I know you're a new specimen."

A shudder ran through me at that wording. "Specimen?" I squawked. "I'm not-" but I stopped at her chilling smile.

"You're not a vampire," she said softly. "You're much more powerful than that. Aren't you?"

I squirmed. Uh, maybe? How did she know so much? Could they really tell so much from a blood sample? Humans.

"So where are you from?" she asked, clasping her fingers before herself on the table. "Tell me," she said so sweetly.

I scowled. "I don't have to tell you anything. I have nothing to do with this situation-"

"Oh?" she raised her eyebrows. "An uprising is being planned, and you just appear?"

I bit my lip. She knew?

She smiled... not patronizingly, matronizingly? Like I was a cute little chick that just needed some good henpecking. "You don't think I'm stupid, do you?"

I swallowed some snark and shook my head.

"You do realize I won't stop until I get the answers I want?" she said with that smile. I wished she'd stop smiling. I fidgeted, taking up my pentacle necklace. No need to use it yet, I told myself. I was just being interrogated. Couldn't I stand this?

But I didn't like the feeling that she knew more than I did. She had so many chips in her hand, and I had none. Except for myself, so to speak. And hey, I'm a mega chip but I need to know what I'm doing. And right now I was out of lies. I just wanted out. So hey, why not try that option?

I imitated her, clasping my hands on the table and leaning forward. "I want to make a deal with you."

Her eyebrows raised. "That's cute, considering your situation."

I bit back a comment. "Let me go, and I'll do you a favor."

"Like what?"

I shrugged. "Like not killing you. Who knows?"

Her teeth flashed brilliant white as she grinned, nastily. "You should reconsider. Tell me something I don't already know, for example."

I snorted and crossed my arms, still leaning forward, trying to get all up in her face. "You can't make me talk."

In a flash she snatched the top of my head and slammed me face-first to the table. Smack! Forehead and nose to the table!

I yelped, cradling my face. Blood! I was bleeding! My nose!

It hurt! I know incarnation brought new sensations, but this pain was just – wow! Ouch!

"So you see," she was saying as I snorted blood and gingerly touched my nose. Not broken? No, not broken. "I can make you talk. I have many, many, ways to make you talk."

I glared at her. "Oh yeah?" I sneered, feeling braver than I felt.

Her smile was still there. "We also have Mark, if you're not enough incentive for yourself. How do you feel about watching an innocent being tortured before your very eyes?"

I blanched. They wouldn't. But one look at that smile and – yeah, they would. Or more precisely, she would.

"Not so sure?" she asked tentatively. "You look a little queasy."

I looked down at my hands. Monsters. Humans are monsters. I wanted to go home already. "Look," I said flatly. "You won't believe me, so,"

"Try me," she said softly.

Uh. I looked at her. Like, really looked at her. She was in a country being attacked by vampires, right? "You know," I said cautiously. "The vampires kind of came out of nowhere, right?"

She waited patiently while I gauged my situation. There was nothing in my mission statement that said 'don't give away our existence', so ... "I'm the Grim Reaper's child," I said flatly.

A light went off in her eyes. "Really?" she said sweetly, way too sweetly.

Shit. What, was she going to run tests on me now? Shoulda thought this through. What now?

"So this is a turf war," she said. "The Skulls kidnapped you to send a message to the Canes."

"Uh, what?" I squinted at her. Skulls? Canes?

She gave me a petulant expression. "Your daddy? The Skulls? Mark's gang? The Canes? Or did you not pay attention to Daddy's work?"

I bit my lip. Just my luck. Just, well, maybe this was a turn for the best."Y-yeah. I just," I hung my head. "Tried not to have anything to do with it," I mumbled.

"But then your friends abandoned you," she said sweetly. "And you were in that car."

I bit my lip harder. Shouldn't have told her that. Really shouldn't have.

"And now here you are," she said in awe, as if I was a golden unicorn pooping a rainbow out for her.

I scowled at her. "So? You gonna send me home or what?"

She smirked. "What did daddy do to make your blood like it is?"

"I'm not a vampire."

"I noticed," she said softly. "So what are you then?"

I squirmed down. "I told you. I'm the Grim Reaper's child. That's all I know."

Oh, those white white teeth. "Well, let's find out together then, why don't we?"

Oh, dear sweet Jesus on a stick.

Chapter Three

Alright, time to escape. I fingered my pentacle, then bit on it softly. More like a nibble. Not that it mattered. FoxFace had walked out of the interrogation room. I was now alone, staring at the mirror/window through which who knew how many people were observing me. Or maybe no one. Really, my guess was all I had – becausee I didn't have a dice to tell me anything. Grump.

Grumps aside, now was me time. Time to shine. I could imagine myself busting out of here like a badass, sword blazing and eyes glowing with magic.

I had a half-ass plan. Aside from just chopping down whatever was in my path – well, I intended to follow the exit signs? Yeah, that was good. This shoud work.

I bit on the edge of my pentacle again, wishing for my dice. It was a lot easier to start a fight when you knew you would win.

But when had I lost a good fight anyways? I could totally do this.

Except I was taken by surprise when the door opened and FoxFace entered. I jumped. She was flanked by several beefy hulks who fanned out in the room around her. She strode forward, a little device in hand. It unlocked the chains around my wrists and ankles. Whooo, high tech chains.

But now I was free. With a smirk, I straightened. "Come this way," she said, marching towards the door.

I bolted. Past her, out the door. I nearly ran into the second door. Oh shit! I whirled, fists lifting just as a whirr and thud- and a feather was sticking out of my chest.

"That was funny," I heard FoxFace saying as the world turned black around me.

Alright, alright, this was getting really irritating! I woke up with chains and cuffs on, strapped to a table.

"Fuck I'm sick of this!" I declared as I opened my eyes to glare around. Someone had better let me go or – or... I'd break my vows not to kill humans? I couldn't. Killing too many incarnates might turn a soul demonic.

I seethed, wishing I had crossed my fingers or something when I'd vowed not to hurt humans. It was making this mission dangerously jeopardized... by the humans themselves!

I should have bolted and run before getting caught. That was it. Because now? Now I was in a laboratory. Blood-filled tubes came out of my arms. Electrodes were strapped to my chest. Lights glared from everywhere and there was test tubes and microscopes all around.

"It's awake!" crooned a lanky dude that strolled over, snapping latex gloves on.

"I'll spit on you if you touch me!" I snapped. That made him stop.

"Is your saliva venemous?" he asked cautiously, adjusting his safety glasses.

I didn't answer but with a vicious grin. Would he take the risk?

He hummed and strolled away behind me. I twisted and squirmed, but couldn't see what he was doing. There was a rustle, then he returned. I groaned, rolling my eyes at the hazardous material suit he was now wearing.

"Hello," he said, waving a hand before my face.

"You look ridiculous!" I snapped.

"But you're not spitting," he said happily.

"Arlg!" I tried to kick but was restrained by the bonds. Cursing loudly, I squirmed and threw what basically amounted to a tantrum. He just stood there and watched.

When I was stilled, he said "Hi," and waved again.

This time I spit. It landed on his helmet. His eyebrows raised. He wiped it off with a cotton swab that he placed in a petri dish on a little side table beside me. No kidding.

"So you speak English, I've been told?" he said slowly, now standing at my side.

"No," I huffed. "I speak engrish."

He chuckled. "That's funny. Now," he stooped to tap at my nose. "I'm going to tell you something. Only once. And if you say the wrong thing, you're going to have an unfortunate accident in my lab. Got that?"

I blinked. Death? Oh good riddance, that would be humiliating. Hi dad, I'm back! So soon...

Taking my silence as a sort of agreement, he plucked up a syringe from a nearby table. "I'm going to pretend to continue doing my tests as we talk," he said. "But this is just, uh, hydration for you. So don't worry."

I blinked at him as my arm was poked with the needle. "What do you want?"

"I want out," he said simply. "I've, as some would say, gotten in too deep. And when you're in 'the bog', there's no actual getting out. But I want out. Get it?"

I squinted at him. He smiled. "Want to escape? Or you want to die here, on this table?" He drew the syringe from me and filled it with air. "Want to know what happens when you get air injected into your heart?"

"I don't know how to get out of here," I blurted.

"I'll take you out," he said. "But you're taking me with you. You protect me. And we can rescue your boyfriend on the way out too."

"My boyfriend? He's eh, not my-" but I was blushing. Dammit!

"We'll take him," he said cheerfully, waving that syringe around. "And we can be a team!"

"Yeah, well, I fly solo," I started.

He laughed. "Yeah you seem real effective at that. Look, I know lots. I got experience in the field. And I have a bag of stuff packed and ready to go that's real useful. So you ready my friend?" He picked up another syringe, then another. "Or do I let you wallow in your misery- and then kill you? 'Cause we all know that's how this is going to end. Trust me, I'm speaking from experience."

I eyed the syringes. Was I really getting rescued by a mad scientist? "Fine," I snapped. "But we rescue Thor, and you give me back my stuff."

"Thor? Your friend?" he asked curiously.

"Doesn't he look like Thor? From the movies?"

"Well I suppose. I'm not a huge movie person. More of a videogame player, myself," he said, but he was pressing a button on the side of the table. With a snap my bonds opened. I sat up, and he handed me a bag with 'caution' taped all over it. "Here's your stuff. Get dressed."

Hastily, I did. It felt so good to have my stuff back! My bracelets, my necklaces, it was my identity! When I turned back around, he had the giant ridiculous suit off and was just in his lab coat and uniform beneath that. Oh, and a military duffel bag with medical patches all over it. He was still holding a syringe in his hand.

"What's that for?" I asked, squinting at the syringe. It had a huge needle on it.

"For poking people with. Let's go. We have a fifteen minute window."

We have a fifteen minute window. The words kept ringing in my head. I felt like I was on fire. I was ready to blow up and take the world with me. Yeah, let's do this. Let me show FoxFace what I was made of – Chaos. Chaos here, ready to take everything down. Wasn't that why I had been offered this mission? Because I rocked, that's why!

For all the fuss in my head, we just walked out of the lab. Bam. The nerd/scientist slid his key card in the slot by the door, and we walked straight on out. A straight corridor that was dimly lit led us to another door – and that one was to the outside.

It was nighttime. A crisp air, no wait , a freezing air wafted over me. There was an inch of snow over everything. Military cars. Military buildings in low long rectangles everywhere. A few soldiers here and there marching. Above, a full moon.

"Werewolves are out," I chuckled, pointing to the giant moon. The scientist was not impressed.

"Should we be expecting werewolves?" he asked in that disaffected tone, syringe still at the ready.

I groaned as we walked down the metal ramp and stairs to the ground. "I was joking!" I hissed. "Can't you tell? Werewolves aren't on earth yet, you know?"

"Yet?" he asked coolly.

"Well," I squirmed and grumbled. "Forget it." I stuffed my hands in the pockets of Thor's fuzzy checkered jacket.

We crossed the distance between the buildings, snow crunching under our boots. This felt surprisingly boring. Soldiers nodded at the scientist, who nodded back and pushed me along.

"Does no one realize what we're doing?" I hissed as we entered the second building.

"I told you. We have fifteen minutes. I did away with the guard, and that's when we'll be found out. Now hurry."

Did away with? Well shit, the nerd wasn't joking around. I scurried after him through a set of doors into this next building.

Here, the faces of the soldiers were dire. They began asking questions, sharp and dry.

"What's your business here?"

The scientist calmly produced a lengthy paper. "Permission to have this subject meet with the prisoner, to jog their memory," he said as if he believed it.

With a grunt the paper was handed back. We slipped forward to a series of cells with this soldier in tow. Several other soldiers lined the walls, all grim and scowling at us. We were let into one, and oh hey! There was Thor!

"Hey!" I said so cheerfully. But Thor gave me a death-glare, and another to the scientist.

"What do you want?" he asked the scientist. "And what's the vampire doing here?" And I was given a nod, but no look.

"Hey, I'm not-" but the scientist spoke over me.

"We have seven minutes to get out of here," he said sharply. "Get up and come along." To me, he said "Stand still," and that syringe jabbed into my shoulder.

"Hey!" I exclaimed, but it was too late. The stuff was in me and the needle drawn out. I rubbed a hand over the site. It was itchy. "What was that?"

"Consider it coffee," he said dryly as he pulled a pair of safety glasses from his lab jacket's pocket and put them on. "Now you do your part. Get us out of here. I'll tell you where to go, but you have to do the people bashing."

"I can't kill-"

"Yeah yeah, just knock them out. We can't just walk out of here with your buddy."

I blanched, remembering all those beefy soldiers lining the wall. "We have to make it out past them? That we just passed?"

The scientist nodded. "You can do that, right?"

"Is this for real?" asked Thor, getting up off his cot and walking over. "You're escaping?"

"Yes, if the kid can do it."

"That's your plan?" I hissed, angry of a sudden. "Get me to do it all?"

And then – whoosh. It was like hot soap in my veins because it burned. It made my eyes tear up and I knew they were turning red, Holy Immortal kind of red. Not pink-eye. It was maybe also like adrenaline. Soapy adrenaline?

"Oh wow," I gasped, heart pumping a mile a minute. Even my fingernails felt like they were shaking. My claws were almost coming out of their own. The scientist grinned. "You've got this, don't you?"

I nodded with a gulp. Oh yeah. Bring it on.

The scientist grinned and pulled the door open. "Aprez vous," he said, guiding me out with a palm.

I didn't even stop to correct his shitty french pronounciation. I just marched on out like I owned the world, because I did. I was on top of it all. I could feel success in my veins.

"Hey, the prisoner can't-" Wham! I kicked the first guy in the face. Then, darting forward, I did pretty much the same for the next two. Gut-punched the next one.

Whirr! Whirr! Feathered thingies flew through the air. They missed me by a hair's breadth, scittering across the floor.

We were half way there when I was surrounded. I didn't even need to take my pentacle off and let it touch ground, I just made the magic happen. IT glowed across the floor, giant red lines that were pulsing with the magic of hell – and whoosh! I felt another surge of power. Ohhh YEAH! I ran forward, knowing I was invincible for the next few seconds. You could say my inner dice were set to a natural 20. The buddies fell down before me.

Just as I landed the last punch, the pentacle vanished, taking that extra surge of power with it. I paused, taking a breath.

"No! Keep moving!" The scientist hauled me forward by the collar. "Move!"

We busted out the door, out into the cold air. The air burned at my eyeballs, at my lungs. Blood and magic was roaring in my ears. My eyes couldn't possibly be more open.

We turned and ran to a car. I skidded, then threw myself into the unlocked passenger door. The scientist threw Thor to the driver seat. "Your turn! Drive like a criminal!"

Thor didn't need telling twice. Pedal to the floor! I fell backwards in the seat, then almost flew forward out the window when we hit a speed bump that certainly didn't slow us down.

"That way! That way!" the scientist was directing from the back seat, pointing left then right then straight as we zoomed ahead, skidding across the snowy streets. The 'check out' loomed ahead. It's gate was closed.

"Throw this!" the scientist said, drawing a potato launcher style thing out of the back seat and shoving it into my hands. "Just point it and shoot!"

"What?" was all I shrieked. But the gate was coming up! I aimed haphazardly and pulled what I thought was the trigger.

Crack! The recoil slammed me back into the seat. The windshield shattered outwards and the gate exploded just as we drove through it.

It was pretty epic. Fire and flames around us for a minute as we drove off.

Chapter Four

Beyond the fire and flames, things calmed down ridiculously fast. No, there was no helicopters chasing after us. Not even cars. We were just zooming away through the hellish pine trees, skidding over the snow. The worst we encountered was a small snowdrift across the road.

"Are they not coming after us?" asked Thor, checking the rear view mirrors obsessively.

"Actually, I don't think so," said the scientist oh so calmly from the back seat. "We are in vampire territory, after all."

I turned around in the seat and looked at him. "What do you mean by that?"

"It means that they can't just send helicopters and armored vehicles into vampire land without it appearing as an invasion. So we're technically safe," he said with a cold smirk.

Thor gave me an ugly look. "You're really dumb?"

I jabbed a finger at him. "Now lookit! I'm just not well versed in social affairs! I'm really good at – at -," and there I floundered for a moment. I was far from the best fighter out there. I wasn't the best magician. "I'm really good at art," I mumbled dejectedly. The splattery kind.

Thor snorted. "That's the kind of thing that won't get you far in life."

"So you wouldn't classify yourself as a good fighter?" asked the scientist, drawing out a notepad from his pocket and scribbling at it.

"What are you doing, taking notes?" I gawked back at him. He nodded.

"Helps me remember. Now who would you classify as a good fighter?"

I snorted. "Ever gotten into a scrap with an archangel? Michael's a good fighter."

"Hmm, I see," more scribbling ensued. "And should we be expecting to see those anytime soon?"

"Of course not!" I snapped before thinking. The Archangels stayed all stuffily in their holy world. The rest of us – well we just needed to fix this little problem. I folded my arms and sat back into my seat, refocusing. I had to get this done. And if we were heading into vampire territory, then things were going surprisingly well. "Hey, you two are going to help me out, right? I've got something I need to do."

Scientist McNerdynerd took off his safety glasses and pocketed them. "And what would that be?"

I looked at Mark pleadingly. "You wanna help?" I fairly whined.

"What is it?" grumbled Mark.

I grinned and propped my feet up on the dashboard, feeling super proud and important. Becau-use... "I have been chosen to close the portal that the vampires are trying to open."

"They're trying to open a portal?" asked the scientist.

"To where?"

"To Hell, of course," I said with a drawl. "They're going to bring all their friends out here on earth. And maybe start Ragnarok by cracking open a seal that brings forth Jesus's ugly lamb-side."

"Ragnarok?" asked Thor, eyeballing me. The scientist scribbled hastily away.

"Of course," I drawled. "But we're going to stop it. So no biggie."

"Wait a minute, you're just mixing hell, Ragnarok, and Archangel Michael together," growled Thor. "You can't just-"

"Oh yes I can," I sniggered, lifting my pentacle pendant to nibble on it.

"Am I to assume all mythology to be accurate in some form?" asked the scientist as he scribbled away.

I shrugged, holding up my pentacle before myself. It glinted in the moonlight. There was no rule against divulging to humans what they already knew, was there? "Sure," I said nonchalantly. Then, after a pause I said "Ancient mythology. There isn't any great flying spaghetti monster."

"And why," the scientist started, but Thor cut him off.

"And who are you? Huh? Vampire spawn?"

Oh right, he didn't know. Lazily I brushed my hair from my face. "I'm the grim reaper's child."

Another angry glare. "And so?"

That – was not the response I'd been looking for. Grovelling? Anyone?

"I'm the grim reaper's child!" I fairly yelled. "A little respect here?"

"You'll find that lineage bears little weight in contemporary Canadian culture," said mister nerd in the back seat.

"Lineage is important!" I snapped, glaring from one scowling Thor to the nerd. "It gives you your powers!"

"And Lucifer went from angel to bad guy," snapped Thor. "So go shove it!"

"Lucifer's pretty cool," I grumbled. "Or do you mean Satan? Both pretty cool."

"Should we be worried about meeting them-"

"No!" I yelled, turning on him. What, did he want the whole cavalry to show up? This was not some experiment! "Look, this is a relatively discreet thing – we don't want everyone to show up. It's just me, and now you two as well. Okay?"

"Closing a portal?" asked the scientist. "That sounds fairly simple."

"Where is this portal?" growled Mark.

I gave him a cheesy grin. "Where else? In the middle of vamp-land."

"The latitude and longitude middle, or the theoretical middle? Or the middle of their largest city?"

I turned around in the seat and glared at him. "Which do you think?" I asked saucily while my mind raced. Now that he mentioned it... I'd always just assumed 'the middle' meant the middle of their largest city.

"I'd assume theoretical middle," he said.

"But which is it?" Thor asked, thumping a hand on the steering wheel. "And what's the plan?"

"Well I think it's in the middle of their city," I huffed, crossing my arms across my chest and throwing myself back against my chair. "And do we need a plan?"

There was a dead silence in the car.

"You don't have a plan?" the scientist whispered so quietly it was almost drowned out by the sound of snow crunching under the tires.

"You don't have a plan," cursed Thor.

I bit my lower lip. Was it really a problem?

"No wonder you got caught," murmured the scientist in awe.

I slunk lower down in my seat, biting my pentacle pendant. These people just didn't understand me. I would show them. This mission was easy. I was going to succeed, and easily at that. The beginning was just a hiccup. All I had to do was -

Thor cursed loudly. "Vamps," he said, pointing ahead.

Indeed, vamps. As in, a full blockade of the things, complete with machine guns and baseball bats.

"Were they expecting us?" I asked, shocked.

"Now would be a good time for a plan," said the scientist, chuckling nervously.

"Now would be a good time for a plan," said the scientist, chuckling nervously.

"I don't need plans," I balked, though I knew it was pointless. I really needed a plan. But you know what I needed more? A dice! I fished in my pockets but there was none to be found.

The truck was slowing down.

"What are we doing?" roared Thor, looking around. "Do we try and bust through? We can't, I see spikes on the road."

"Uh, uh," and I tried to come up with a plan. "Why don't we just talk with them?"

And so, like a little weird family going to the drive-through, we pulled up to a stop at the vampire's impromptu barricade. Thor and I rolled down our windows, playing it cool.

"Hey," I said.

The vampires just stood and stared like they'd never seen the likes of this before. There were the spawns, spider-like with human heads, but there were also full-fledged vampires in human form. They were all bundled up in winter gear and one even had a hockey stick. They uh, looked significantly less impressive without all their leather gear on.

But what do you expect? Hell spawns to not need winter gear? Please, I was freezing and I was from a different level of hell than them.

One vampire stepped forward. She was wearing a puffy grey winter coat that hung to her thighs, a knit black hat, and had beady dark eyes and a pointed chin. "What?" she demanded.

I couldn't resist. "Eh?" I asked, leaning out the window. After all, no hellspawn said 'eh'. That was an obnoxious human thing, from this part of the world only. Did it work?

"I said! WHAT?" she yelled in my face. The baseball bat in her hand flew up menacingly.

Okay well, whatever. I blinked, wiping the spit from my cheeks. I played innocent. "Can we come through? Are you guys looking for someone or something?"

The vamp paused. "We are looking for someone. But that's none of your business. What are you doing here?"

I turned to Thor. "This is my older brother. We got busted doing one of your deliveries, so we're coming through on the way to recon with his boss or something."

The vampire sucked on her teeth, looking around the car. "And the dude in the back?"

"A hostage," I said cheerfully. "We're bringing him in. Says he got some info or something."

I could almost hear the scientist in the back sweating, that's how nervous he looked in the rearview mirror as the vampire scowled at him. But she thumped a fist on the side of the car. "Okay. You can go."

Thor looked ready to crap himself. I nodded. "Thanks."

The vampire stepped away from the car and began ordering the barricade moved. Within minutes it was moved and we were sifting through.

"Wow," muttered Thor as we began slowly driving on. "You did that."

"Oh yeah," I muttered like it was no big deal.

Thor gave me a look. "So you're the Grim Reaper's son?"

"Child," I corrected him. "I'm non-binary."

"Uh-huh," grunted Thor. "That newfangled thing."

"Actually, it's not really new," piped up the scientist.

"Yeah," I snapped, kicking my boots up on the dashboard. "Besides, my genitals are none of anyone's business."

Thor shook his head, tapping a hand on the steering wheel. "So now what? We just keep driving until we find a sign saying 'portal here'?"

I bit my lip. Yeah, true, but uh, I didn't even know where we were. Like, I'd received some directions but 'go straight past the blue house' didn't seem useful any more.

I picked up my pentacle and nibbled on it. After a moment of silence I spoke. "So," and that's as far as my thoughts got. I drew a blank. Ridiculous, really, but I didn't know what to do or say next. We were just driving on this infernal road past zillions of pine trees that looked like the columns of hell.

But everyone was looking to me for directions.

"Gotta make sure we don't run into werewolves," I said nonchalantly, knowing full well there were no werewolves in this world. But did they know that? No. So I looked smart.

"How do we do that?" asked the scientist weakly.

Avoid looking sexily edible? Uh, well, "Stay out of the forest?" I suggested lamely. "We should hit a village or something soon so we can ask for directions-"

"Asking for directions? Really?" asked Thor. "That's how lost you are?"

"What?" I bit back. "It can't hurt?"

"Oi hey, dark denizens of doom, can ye tell me the way to hell?" asked Thor, putting on a terrible Irish accent. "Oi noes? You want to tell me to yoink myself? Oi really!"

"Oh shut up!" I snapped. "You don't have a better idea!"

"That doesn't mean your idea is good! One shit doesn't downplay the fact the other shit is still shit!"

I was baffled. My idea wasn't bad. I'd just talked to the vampires and see? It went well? "Don't you trust me?" I demanded, deciding to pull the emotional card.

"No," said everyone in the car. I heard an extra voice in here.

Paling, I turned around in my seat. There, next to the scientist, was a black shape with glowing green eyes.

"Hello, Chaos," she whispered.

"Oh, shit," I said as I stared at the spirit sitting in the back seat.

"Language, language," whispered the being. "Children shouldn't swear."

"Fuck you!" I snapped without thinking. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, well, you know," the blob took on a haphazard shape. Now it had eyes and a mouth and was somewhat of a humanoid shape. "Someone's gotta babysit."

"I do not need babysitting!" I yelled.

The scientist looked to her, looked to me, and frowned. "What are you looking at?" he asked. "Is there something-" and he poked at her, going right through her.

Oh crap. She wasn't incarnated. They couldn't see her.

She grinned fiendishly at me. "Are you having a mental breakdown?"

Without thinking, I yelled back. "I'm not having a-" I stopped myself just in time. Glaring at her, I turned to Thor.

"There's a demon in the back seat," I announced dryly.

"Really?" Thor looked in the rearview mirror and frowned. "I'm not feeling it."

"Me neither," said the scientist in awe as he kept passing his hand through her. She kept grinning at me.

"Who is it?" asked Mark grimly. "A vampire hunter? Horseman of the apocalypse? Tell us."

I groaned and slunk down in my chair. "It's no one. Just a dumb, lower-level, obnoxious, demon."

"Yeah, there's a real dumb spirit around here," she said loudly from the back. I wanted to plug my ears. Maybe if I ignored her she'd leave? Soon? What was she even doing here?

I threw myself around, making the scientist jump. But my glare was not for him. "How'd you get permission to come here? Huh?"

She grinned and kicked back in her seat, stretching tendril-like arms above her head. "Who said I had permission? You're not the only rule breaker around here."

"I have special permission!" I burst. "And I will send you back if-" I held up my cross pendant. "Or I'll tell my dad! And he'll come and get you!"

She leaned forward, putting on a shrill childish voice. "Oh, I'll tell daddy. Oh, I'm a little snitch and my name is Chaos."

I just about turned purple in the face. I opened my mouth, but no sound came out. Her grin turned nasty. "Go on, call daddy. Do it."

I thumped back into my chair, deciding to ignore her again. Whatever. Like I needed her approval.

My fingers traced the cross pendant against my chest. Should I? She wasn't allowed to be here. What if she interfered? Would it be ... bad? Or could I use this to my advantage?

Frowning, I focused on the road ahead. The pine trees lined ever on and the wind blew in icily.

"Hey Chaos!" she yelled in my ear.

I yelled, jumping three feet in the air. "What?" I yelled, turning to see her leaning up between Mark and me.

"I want a body," she declared. "Get me a body."

"I'm not getting you a body!" I snapped. "If you'd wanted one, you should have incarnated!"

"Too much paperwork," she grunted. "Hey, is this guy really attached to himself?" And she poked at the scientist.

"He lives in there so I'd say yeah, pretty attached. And if you try possession, I Will report you!" I was protective of my little mission pals.

"Uhm," Thor cleared his throat.

"Oh hey, he's hot," she said, leering around at him. "Tell him to pull the car over. I can take him over, then we can make out. Neat, right?"

"Shut up!" I squawked.

"What is going on?" asked Thor.

"What's their name?" asked the scientist, scribbling away at their notepad.

My nerves were beginning to fray. "I want to drive!" she announced, jumping at Thor.

"No!" I yelled, trying to stop her. No luck. If I'd had rolled my dice on it, it would have been a critical 1. A complete failure.

I tackled Mark/Thor, grasping for the immaterial that could not be touched. Thor yelled, shoving me off him. The car skidded, then we must have hit a patch of ice because it really skidded.

"AHH!" I yelled as the ditch came zooming up towards us.

Bwoof!

It was like landing on soft fluffy marshmallows. But at 100 kilometers an hour. So the 'bwoof' sent us all flying in all directions. The car keeled over to its side and I was now squished sideways with Thor half on me. There was a scientist's leg in the air beside my head.

Great, bouncing, burgers.

"AL!" I shrieked, clawing my way up. I scrambled over Thor and pushed his door open. He shoved me and I made it out the door. "I'm going to kill you!" I yelled, stepping out into the crisp air.

A light drifting of snow was fluttering down. There was no noise now. Not a sound. I stood on the side of the car, breath misting before me as I glared out at the pine trees' depths. Was she hiding in their branches? Or was she right beside me, invisible?

No warning. None at all! Just – CRA-KOOM! Lightning split the sky and struck the road where the car would have been, further down the road. Sparks flew. Smoke spiralled up.

Worse? There was now a dark figure there. The shape of a teen, wearing a long coat that framed their figure. Whisped in dark tendrils of smoke, it began striding forward down the road. Towards us.

"Who is that?" asked Thor, now by my side.

"It's her," I grumbled, gritting my teeth, hands balled into fists.

"The demon?" whispered the scientist, climbing up beside Thor.

A cloud drifted away from the moon, allowing light to beam down onto her in a most dramatic of ways.

She was as tall as me, but her hair was cut short around her chin with long bangs that fluttered about her face. Her hair was a deep blue with jet bright streaks in it. Her skin was dark, her face pretty nondescript, especially with those sporty sunglasses she had on. She was wearing a deep purple and pink trenchcoat with orange eagles on it. Oh, and she was had thick black leather boots.

"Hey Chaos," she said as she stepped to the edge of the road before the car. There was a nasty grin on her face.

"Hey," I seethed. "Do you have to ruin everything?"

"It's my duty," she drawled, running fingers through her hair dramatically.

"Who are you?" asked the scientist, sounding way too impressed for his own good.

She totally let it get to her head. As always. "My name is Al," she drawled. "And I'm Chaos' fiancee."

Chapter Five

Just like that, she said it. "And I'm Chaos' fiancee."

I wanted to die of humiliation. Ugh. I crossed my arms and glared her down. "You don't own me. What are you even doing here?"

"Wait a minute," said the scientist, scribbling away at his pad. "Fiancee? What's your name? Who are you?"

"Al is my 'presenting' name. It's what everyone calls me, and what most people can pronounce," she said snottily. "And," she pointed to one of the eagles on her coat. "I'm the daughter of the Thunderbird."

Mark looked like his brain might have exploded. "Thunderbird?"

"Native mythology," I said, just in case, oh I don't know, "Which no one cares about!" Which absolutely wasn't true and I knew it, but I had to throw something at her. My dad was famous! Hers was, well... not so famous. So I considered our engagement to be a step down in my life.

She grinned. "Oh yeah, I'm just a sad little twerp compared to," and she gestured to me. "This thing."

"Thing?" I squawked. "You-" but I stopped myself. There was the sound of a car coming down the road.

"Hide!" hissed the scientist.

"In this snow?" Al gestured to the foot of snow all around us. "They'll just track you."

"Got a better idea?" I hissed, knowing that, again, she was right.

She squared her shoulders. "Stand your ground and face them 'like a man'," and then she burst into sniggers.

"Oh, very funny," I sneered.

The car rounded the bend in the distance, lights coming into view. It wasn't driving particularly fast. Did vampires drive fast? Did they speed? There were (surprisingly) no highways in hell, so I wasn't sure where they got their driving skills from.

"Al, do you have a dice on you?" I hissed, fidgeting. Should we stay and fight? Run and fight? How could I tell?

"You lost your dice?" she asked, completely shocked. "Wow. This is going bad."

"I didn't lose it, someone took it from me!"

She made a face. "That's even worse."

I scowled. "You go rot. Do you have a dice or not?"

She shrugged. "Of course not. I'm not an addict like you."

The car approached, slower and slower. Al kept herself planted before us, practically in the middle of the road. She looked at the car, daring it to run her down.

It didn't. Whoever it was drew to a stop before it even bumped her highness' legs.

Because that's how things always were for her. Everyone was all 'ooo, a wise spirit!' or 'ooo, such majesty' or 'ooo, so amazeballs'. She just had to exist and people worshiped her.

And here I was, busting my ass and everyone was calling me stupid.

I wanted to throw a snowball at her face. An ice-cold explosion across the face. Would serve her right.

But uh, the car was stopped. Vampires began piling out. And like, way more than was safely allowed in a car. There was almost ten of them that had been all squished up in that car.

At their head, a big beefy guy with a waxy shaved head stepped forward. "You kids lost or something?" he sneered at Al.

Al turned to me, imitating his sneer. "Yeah, you lost or something?"

"What?" she wasn't on my side? What the hell, Al? Fiancee from hell, indeed!

"We uh," I held up my freezing hands to my shoulders as if I was surrendering. Just to show I had no weapons. "Uh,"

Al grinned at me. What a jerk. Such a jerk.

Heyyyyy. She was a jerk, right? And she wasn't supposed to be here, at all. Like, full nope on the nope-scale.

I tried not to grin. "We're hunting a demon. You may have noticed it, it killed a bunch of spawns riding in a truck the other day."

The frown on the chunk's face told me that yeah, maybe?

I pointed to Al. "She's right there. Help me catch her."

"Wait, what?" Al looked from him to me and back again and back again. She pointed to her collarbone. "Did you just – I did not-"

Yeah, I threw her under that bus.

"Be careful," I said to the vampires. "She's a high-level demon. She just incarnated so she's still really powerful-"

The vampires nodded. We were now working together. Like wolves on the prowl, they stepped out to encircle Al.

Al who, to her credit, wasn't freaking and squealing. She merely adjusted her sunglasses. "I'm going to pay you back for this, kid," she said.

"Bite me," I snapped.

She clicked into action like a wound-up toy that had just been let free. Wham! Punch to the beefcake's face! Double wham! Kick and punch another vamp! Then Yoink! Up she jumped, transforming in a blink into a golden eagle that was pumping its wings and rising up, up.

Several vampires lifted guns. Oh shit.

"No don't!" I yelped, throwing myself forward. I flung my arms out, trying to block their aim. The large beef of a dude glared me down.

"What?" he barked.

"You don't want to kill her, you want to capture her!" I invented.

There was a pause. I glanced back up. The eagle, aka Al, had vanished over the forest.

"You'd better have a good reason to have stopped us," intoned the bald beef.

I lowered my arms. I smelt an opportunity. And who was I to turn that down? "Take me to your leader," I said. Eyebrows were raised all around. The scientist cleared his throat softly. I repeated, louder this time. "Take me to your leader. I want to work with you. We need to catch this demon. We can join forces."

The vampires stared at me. Snowflakes fluttered left and right. It was cold, and I was fucking freezing, okay? So I stamped my feet and cursed.

No, they couldn't just 'bring me in because I gave a pretty speech'. They were smarter than that. So the big dude was on a tiny cellphone, holding up one arm in the air, then the other.

"Your body is not a channeling wire," I hissed as he tried standing on one leg to reach higher.

"The reception here is bad," he said to me as if I hadn't already concluded that. Then he waved his arm around again, trying to literally 'catch' the signal, maybe?

The scientist shuffled next to me, hugging his lab coat around himself. "By the way," he said , prodding me with an elbow. "My name is Leo."

"Oh, yeah," I said, completely ignoring him.

"Don't just ditch me somewhere," he hissed between his teeth. Whoah, reading my mind much?

I glared at him. "I don't owe you anything."

He gave me a hard look. "No, you owe me your life."

"Do not."

He blinked slowly. The icy wind blew between us. He looked every bit as frustrated as someone standing in the cold, realizing they'd just hinged their lives on → me. Chaos. I lived up to my name, okay?

"I was going to escape one way or another," I said dryly, looking back around at the bundled up vampires. Some had taken hermitage back within their car. Others still tried to keep up their menacing auras while huddling like penguins.

"You- oh for fuck's sake," grumbled Leo. "You were literally about to become little bits in a petri dish. I saved you. Now the deal was-"

"So sad, don't care," I muttered. "Shut up."

He looked ready to crack me one. I stalked past him, crunching through the snow to stand by the beefy guy who was now frowning down at his cellphone.

"Give me that," I ordered.

The beefcake looked at me. He had removed his sunglasses due to the fact that it was (duh) dark out here. He looked somehow less menacing with pea-sized eyes. I held out my hand in a silent order.

To my surprise, the phone was put in my hand. "You got cellphone powers or what?" the beefcake asked.

"Yeah, check this out," I said, turning away and chucking the dumb thing at arm's length into the forest. Yeah! Great shot!

I turned back around, spreading my arms. "See? I made it disappear."

The vampires gawked. Those who were still trying to look cool took off their sunglasses to make sure they'd seen it right.

"The phone," moaned beefyMcbeefcake.

"Yeah, so," I snapped. "Let's go."

The vampires gawked at me. I had the feeling I was missing something. Why such horror?

Then, faintly, I heard the phone ringing. The vampires launched into action. "Get It!" roared the beefcake. "The boss's call can't be missed!"

Oh. Shit. Way to endear myself to them.

So, yeah, I stood there like a goof while the horde of vampires vanished into the pine trees, scattering in bat form. A mere minute later, one returned, reappearing in humanoid form before the beefcake. She was wearing a snowsuit and really, only her nose was visible under that wool hat.

"Hello?" beefMcburgerarms answered the phone. "Yes, boss!" He turned a nasty eye to me, then to Mark and Leo. "We've found something. No, we haven't captured the escaped hellion. But we found someone else. Do we bring them to you?"

I held my breath and wished for my dice. I'd have tossed it right then if -

"Okay, yes," the beefy nodded. Then, with a surprised sound, he held the phone away from his ear. "oh," he said softly. "She hung up."

My skin crawled. "She?" I asked. Because, screw me, I didn't get along well with females. Or women. Or really, anyone, but particularly not with women. Example in case: my fiancee. Who was right now probably crying to her daddy about how mean I was to her and blablabla.

But let's focus back here. The vampires were staring at me like I was a sexist little shit.

"Yeah, so?" asked another woman vamp who was wearing a banana yellow coat that left no shape to her but a giant blob.

"I just," I fished in my mind, trying to remember what female was in charge in the vampire legions. None came to mind. They usually were bald-headed guys with fangs who liked to speak dramatically. No women allowed in their dumb club.

So who was this leader?

I shrugged. "I'd love to meet her."

The badguys snorted. "Sure you will. Get in the car."

I looked at the already-cramped looking vehicle. And we weren't all already in it yet. "Uh..."

Well, we fit. I spent the entire ride cramped on someone's lap. Not so luckily, Leo was sitting in people's footspace, and Mark had three vampires piled in his lap. No one was a happy camper.

At least I got to watch the scenery change as we drove on. The pine trees receded to give way to rolling fields and little farms that were all bundled up for winter. Then those faded away sharply, giving way to a pretty plain-looking city. It was all cubes and granite, with french street names that I couldn't pronounce to save my life.

We turned on a road that was probably named after a croissant, and wham! The brakes went on.

"Fucking deer!" cursed the beefcake as we swerved on the silent road around a very still deer. A deer with blue eyes that stared straight at me through the windows.

Uh...

Luckily, there was no traffic, and we avoided the very much there ditch and electrical pole. Onwards we zoomed, vampires muttering about how hazardous this climate was- and I noticed that hey, there really was no traffic here. That and the deer had vanished.

We swerved, veered, and passed important-looking buildings in the center of town. The street lights weren't working, the snow was piling thicker and thicker with no plow in sight, and I had the feeling that civilization under vampire rule had come to a stand-still.

Then we drew up to a house. A friggin' house.

It was one of those cute oldsie victorian style houses, with frills and ruffles and the whole shingle thing going on. In this light, it was, well, dark with lighter highlights. Green and white maybe? Who knows? The important things was this: the driveway was shoveled neatly, baring the asphalt driveway.

Asphalt is very hard, I realized as the car doors were opened and I was gracelessly flung out.

"God dammit," I hissed, cursing and rubbing my elbows. I rose to my feet as the vampires piled out around me, dragging Leo out by the scruff and prodding Mark on with knives.

We were ushered up onto the porch. Frilly curtains hid the interior of the house, but dim lights shone through. The beefcake cleared his throat, straightened his posture, and knocked on the door. In fact, all the vampires straightened their posture. Some even began to put on their best smiles.

The door was opened by a maid in a frilly outfit and stockings and the whole deal. "Welcome," she whispered, fang-less and lowering her gaze. Human. Ah.

She stepped aside, letting us all troop haughtily in. "The master is in the painting room," she said in a hushed tone. She didn't dare look anyone in the eyes as she began taking coats.

To my glee, the majority of the vampires stayed in the entry. Only two accompanied me and the beefcake as I was walked into the house.

And damn, it was a nice house. It was filled with all this polished wood and spiralling staircases and neat frames. Except when I double checked one frame, it wasn't an oldsie picture of some victorian person, as would be expected. It was a Buddha, styled in black and white to suit the theme.

Rattling myself, I wondered what sort of bad guy/badgirl kept Buddhas around. Well, I was about to find out, wasn't I?

Up the imposing staircase, we were faced with a thick door. Beefy guy rapped his knuckles on it, straightening his posture again.

"Enter," said a female voice.

Chapter Six

We entered a room that was large and somberly lit. Like the rest of the house it was all polished wood and paneling with a chandelier lighting it. Against one wall sat an upright piano. A fireplace crackled against the other wall. And there, in a deep comfy oldsie-styled chair, was a figure.

I wanted her clothes. There was buckles on the turtle neck collar, on the sides of a slightly corset-styled waist, down the sides of her jeans, and on the sides of her knee high boots.

When she turned her face to us, I forgot about her clothes though. First things first → she had the same haircut as Al. Really? Chin-length hair, minus the bangs. Except her hair was light reddish chestnut brown instead of jet black.

Second. I nearly jumped out of my skin, I was so shocked. She had one blue eye (right). And by the brightness and slight glow to it, it was the mark of a Nephilim, one of majorly angelic descent. Her other eye was covered with a black patch, leaving me wondering as to what color it was.

"Hi," I said, lifting a hand. Whack! The big beefcake smacked me on the back of the head with a hand and lowered my hand with another.

The madam/mistress/boss in charge of it all smirked. "Let her be," she said condescendingly. She waved a hand at us. "Actually, you can all leave. The kid can stay."

"But! Madam!"

She snapped her fingers in the air. "No buts! Go."

The entire troupe of vampires bowed and crowed together "Namastay," in varying varieties of pronounciations.

I blinked and turned to stare at them. Had I heard that right? But they were all filing out, glaring at me before shutting the door behind them.

I turned to her. The madam. She was still smirking while watching me. Elbows propped on the armrest, she flicked her fingers at me. "Come," she said. "Draw up a chair. Namastay, by the way. Feel welcome."

Nama-what? I blinked, wondering which pantheon she was from. From the skin tone, she should be something western. She was pretty pale, Irish maybe? But that namastay-

"I said," she barked. I jumped out of my thoughts into a terrifying moment. Her eye was gleaming and shivers crawled over my skin. "Pull up a fucking chair."

I pulled up a fucking chair. Right to where she was pointing. Then I sat down in it. It was really comfy. Decadently so, but it didn't help me relax one bit. No, really, she reminded me of my relatives. Or really, anyone of rank in Hell. Maybe a little archangel in her too? Who knew?

All bad mood vanished, she smiled sweetly at me again. "Namastay," she crooned. "Good to meet you."

"You know me?" I asked, ego inflating a little. Yeah! I was known! A smile crept over me.

"Not at all. Couldn't place you in a crowd. But," she flicked her fingers upwards. "I'm sure we'll get to know each other well."

I deflated somewhat. Oh, yeah. Well, not everyone knew the Grim Reaper had children, but uh... I tried to refocus myself. "So uh, who are you?"

"Direct," she crooned. "I like that. Simplicity is a virtue." And her eyes swept over to an immense painting that was draped in curtains. It was vintage- or not. It was a giant Buddha, one hand in his lap and the other touching the earth. The gesture meant something, but I couldn't guess what. It was serene, made to look like a vintage photograph.

Her fingers propped her chin, almost caressing herself. They were spindly thin, her fingers. In fact, beneath the cut of her clothing, she was bone thin. Almost unhealthily so. "I am a human," she said softly. A direct lie if my eyes were telling me anything. "And that is how I interact with this world."

"But you," I pointed to my own eyes. "You're nephilim."

She smiled at that painting. "To the Buddha, we are all suffering, all in need of salvation."

I glanced again at the painting. So serene. I looked back at her, who seemed wholly entranced by it. She shifted, our eyes connected, and she smiled as if she pitied me.

"Buddhism is the ultimation of humans. All other things have been handed down from deities, spawning their will in this world. But Buddha," she gestured to the painting. "Was human." And her eyes lit up. "I love humans," and her voice dropped to a whisper. "I'm going to save them."

"Yeah okay."

"I'm going to save everyone," she crooned, both eyes fairly glowing.

I fidgeted. Something about her seemed unhinged. Just a little. "Uhm, okay."

She point-blank interrupted me with a clap of the hands. "We have a non-believer in the room!" And she smiled nastily at me. "You don't care about the Buddha, do you?"

I smiled half-heartedly. "That's not what I'm here for-"

"The Buddha would say that you," and she pointed a finger between my eyes. "Are lost in the swamps of delusion."

Yeahhhh, okay. I hadn't met a preacher since visiting a lower level of hell, and hey, this sounded similar. "Uhm,"

"We're all suffering," she crooned at me. "We're all in this together." and she reached out and took one of my hands in both of hers. "Don't you see that? Don't you feel the pain, hear the screams of the world? It's alive, we all are."

And you, are a nutbag. I wiggled my fingers in her grasp. "Uhm," I cleared my throat and ducked my eyes from her overly sympathetic glare. "What's your name?"

She released me with one hand and snatched up a book from her handtable. "Bella," she said with passion. "I am Bella."

Twilight. That's what she was holding. Twi-light.

She held the book out to me, voice riddled with passion. "This was my past life – I," and she seemed lost for words. "You must understand past lives. Don't you?" And then she laughed and looked at the book. "It is impressive, how easily humans write up the lives of others. Don't you think?"

I think you're off your rocker. But I smiled and nodded. That satisfied her. She set the book down. The hand that still held me caressed me with a thumb. She looked down at our joined hands. "And you, dear child, what is your name?"

"Chaos," I said proudly.

"Chaos," she nodded with a hum. "What a lovely name." her eyes sparkled sincerely at me as she clasped my hand in both of hers. "I hope we can be good friends, Chaos."

Yeah, no. But I nodded and forced a smile. "Yeah." Alright, I wanted my hand back. I tugged, and she gave way. She held her hands to her chest, pressing against her heart while she beamed at me. "My heart is happy at your name," she whispered. "I feel we shall be good friends."

O-kay. Alright. "Yeah, uhm,"

"Are you tired? Hungry?"

"No, actually, I -" and I hesitated. How to approach this? Suddenly I felt the emptiness of my lack of a plan.

"Yes?" she asked sweetly.

I totally segwayed off to the side, so to speak. Let her keep talking while I figured out what I needed from her. "How did you get here? You're not a vampire?" I gestured at the door. "And yet – you're not their juicebox."

She tossed her head back and laughed heartily. That took a minute. Then, brushing a tear from her eye, she laughed at me once more. "Oh, you're funny too! Oh, I like you."

Uh. I almost yelped and jumped back, she took my hand in hers again so suddenly, snatching it from me to squeeze it passionately. "If only you could understand what we are trying to do," she whispered. "But you -" and a finger waved at my third eye. "are not yet awakened."

Okay, now I was curious. "Not yet what?"

But she shook her head, grinning. "You don't need to know. You're here for your lost minion, yes? Stay a while. Stay with us," and she patted my hand and let go before kicking back in her chair and gesturing. "Maybe we're not that strange to you. Maybe you'd like to join us."

Excellent! "I'd love to stick around," and snoop in all the corners and find your portal. Which she hadn't yet mentioned, by the way, which was strange for a preacher-esque nut. Usually they went on and on about their evil plans. But she just cooed and clasped her hands beneath her chin and had hearts fairly bubbling from her eyes as she looked at me. "Our souls are attuning," she said. "The desire to stay is just the beginning, my dear."

Uh, yeah no.

I wanted to just leave the room, but hey. Instead I was... announced out? There's just no way to describe how I was marched to the door with a hand on my shoulder, and the door was dramatically flung open so it slammed upon the opposite wall and all. The vampires who were standing around the door jumped and spun.

Bella lifted her chin at them like she was the most important thing in the world. No, she radiated it. Then, she crooned. "Namastay," while designating me with the tips of her fingers as if I was a crystal ball that shouldn't be touched. "Put our guest up for the night. Find her some clothes and -" she didn't finish her sentence, shrugging and letting it drift away.

The vampires bowed, echoing 'namastay'. I took a breath and looked over my shoulder at Bella. She had a smile on (did she ever not smile?) and was obviously in dreamland.

The vampires remained in their bow. They were waiting for something. I wondered what the hell was going on.

But nothing happened. Bella just stood there for a minute as if relishing in her power. Her strange smile stayed fixed on her face. Then, suddenly, it was over. "Have a good night, everyone." She patted me on the shoulder. "Don't get into mischief."

And with a clap, she shut her door. The vampires rose from their bows. I looked from the shut door to them. Gingerly, I pointed a thumb over my shoulder at the door. "Is she always like that?"

"Our Queen has been gifted with visionary powers unlike any other," intoned my beefcake. "Don't make light of them." Or we'll beat you to a pulp.

I nodded, stuffing my hands in my pockets. "Oh," as if I hadn't already understood that.

Beefcake clapped a heavy hand on my shoulder, then another. "This way," he grunted, physically maneuvering me towards the stairs. I let him, grinding my teeth at the treatment.

Downstairs, Mark and Leo were waiting nervously. I could see why. The other vampires were surrounding them, sharpening their knives, hungry eyes fairly devouring my friends.

"They're to be put up for the night," grunted the beefcake in charge. I was shoved to the center of the waiting room beside Leo. "Find them rooms."

Groaning, various vampires pulled out cellphones and began texting. Those that had accompanied me upstairs just stood there and glared imposingly at me. I put my hands in my pockets and looked around at the décor.

After a moment of doing that, I cleared my throat. "So," I turned to Mr beefymcbeef. "Bella-"

"Our Queen," he intoned. "Is not to be called by her name alone. Show some respect."

"Oh, yes, no disrespect intended," wouldn't want to insult the nutbag. "Uhm," I tried to formulate my words into a proper question, but all that came to mind was 'Twilight? Really?'. So I blurted out whatever came next to mind. "Where's she from?"

There was a universal snort, even from the ones on the cellphones. Mr Beefcake glared at me.

I waited a moment before admitting that they weren't going to answer. "Why?" I asked loudly. "Is she some sort of secret?"

"We don't discuss our Queen with strangers," one on a cellphone said loudly, only to be shushed by others.

"They're not worth it," muttered another.

I flopped down onto an armrest beside a vampire. She hissed at me, baring her fangs. I hissed back. That baffled her.

"Found one for the kid," said a scrawny vampire, handing the cellphone to my beef-in-charge.

"Good," the beef took the cellphone, then handed it back. Nodding at me he said "This way."

We paused for him to put his coat on, and then we trooped out into the snow. It was a full-on snowstorm now, snow flurries whacking me in the face and making me blink uncontrollably. I could barely see a thing, and felt stupid as I trudged along behind the hulking vampire.

I was taken to a neighboring building where a quaint-looking family greeted us with very toothy smiles, all vampires, even the little toddler in their arms.

"So pleased to be of service to our Queen," they cooed as we were let in.

Mumble mumble, went the beefcake, taking the mother aside and muttering something to her. I was led by the father to a guest's room.

It was all very quaint. Nicely painted, with ruffles and ribbons on things. Barf.

Then, as I was looking at the ruffles and ribbons all around this room, the door was drawn shut behind me.

I stayed in that room all night, sleeping lightly and generally being frustrated. There was no window to escape from, and I didn't want to just bust out and get caught sneaking around. What was I going to find in this house anyways?

The next morning, at no particular time that I could decipher, I was woken up by the mother.

"Darling," she cooed as she pushed the door open. "It's time to wake up."

I sat up grudgingly. I was no one's darling! I was about to give her a mouthful of my opinion when I saw that she was carrying clothes for me. Fresh clothes!

Mercifully, they weren't pink and purple or something hideous like that. No, they were black with ... 'visitor' spray painted on it in white. Really? Really?

I put the t-shirt on, thinking that, really, it couldn't have gotten any cornier. The cargo pants fit as well with a belt and mercifully they didn't have 'visitor' spray painted on the ass or something dumb like that.

Trudging out of the room, I was greeted with – Bella herself standing there with a troupe of vampires. The family that had 'hosted' me looked ecstatic out of their minds, starry eyes staring adoringly at Bella. Bella who turned her smile to me.

"Namastay," she crooned. "You're awake."

I glanced to a window and saw that it was still dark out. "Morning?" I guessed?

"We need to get a start on your day if you're to see everything," Bella crooned as she waved me over. "Hurry, hurry, we haven't got all day."

Frowning, I let myself be ushered out the door into the cold and dark – with Mark's coat on. Fuck, no one was ushering me out without a coat on. Not in this cold.
Chapter Seven

Speaking of cold, it was cold. Very cold. Icy cold. Freeze-in-your-nostrils kind of cold. Mist up and freeze on your face cold. And there Bella was, wearing a bomber jacket styled winter coat, jeans (with zippers and chains on the side!) and a black wool hat. She had a large smile on, as if she just couldn't get enough of this white crap everywhere as we walked down the road. Ugh.

"Your friend Mark tried to run away last night," she said so happily that I almost didn't understand the meaning of her words.

"He what?"

She turned that simple smile to me. It looked so pure. It felt pure, like she didn't have a bone of malice in her body. "Oh, he's been restrained so he won't hurt himself," she said sweetly. "Don't worry."

"Hurt himself?" I echoed, almost stopping in my tracks. What was that evil-person code for? Were they torturing him?

"Oh, he was very distraught," she said before heaving a sigh. "It's unfortunate."

"What's unfortunate? What have you done with him?" I tried to run up before her but she held out an arm, winding me in the face as I tried to pass here. I doubled over, clutching at my poor nose. There were snorts of derision from the troupe of vampires around us. When I looked up, Bella had come to a stop next to some funny looking machines that were parked where the road was supposed to be. Were they motorcycles? Except they had skis on them...

"Skidoos," she said as if reading my mind. "I guess they don't have them in hell, do they?" and she plucked a helmet from one and handed it to me. "Watch your nose."

I took the helmet from her, glaring barbs her way. I had half a mind to just unleash my powers and beat her to a pulp. But then I'd have to fight all her dumb minions and find the portal on my own. Hopefully this way she would lead me straight to it.

"Now you can ride with Mcfarlan," she said, gesturing to the beefcake-in-charge from yesterday, who was popping his little head into his own helmet.

Grimly, I stalked over to him. He climbed onto the skidoo behind her majesty's, and I followed suit. Disgusted, I took hold of the back of Mcwhatever's jacket and hoped not to fall off. I'd been allowed to ride a motorcycle in hell, but it had been tricked so as not to bust speed limits. Like, you now you're in hell when there's speed limits on everything. Betcha there's none of those in heaven.

We took off. Zooming through the city at daytime (without white crap in your face) was a totally different experience. The houses were bright and quaint around here, quickly giving way to shops and malls – and not a single car.

Well, there was over a foot of snow everywhere. Where would the cars go?

Instead there was other skidoos here and there, quickly switching to drive next to us, but always behind Bella. Pretty soon, I looked around and we were leading a whole flock of skidoos. The sound was such a racket. I wondered what the hell was going on. Was I about to be mobbed to death? A public execution of sorts? Was I breakfast for the starving hordes?

We drove up to a chapel. There Bella skidded to a halt, and the entire horde followed suit. I gawked at the number of vampires present. If it was a buffet, there certainly wasn't enough blood in me to fill up everyone.

No, if this was her legions, then hell was empty of vampires right now. Because seriously, vampires have always been a protected species (don't laugh) but there was so many right here.

The massive chapel was bursting full of them. They shrieked and squealed with joy as Bella came in, parting for her like the proverbial Red Sea, if the Red sea had still desperately wanted to touch Moses.

Arms were waving towards her. Babies were held out. The air was frenzied, frantic. The crowd closed right after her, blocking us from following her. Mcsomethingorother grabbed me by the shoulders and held me against him to keep me from getting torn from him by the crowd's movement.

And that's when it struck me. This was no army. There was no discipline, no ranks. Everyone was wearing civilian clothes and – I looked around at the screaming mouths to be sure. These were humans. We were actually a tiny patch of vampires, in a swathe of humans.

"Friends," cooed Bella from the spot where the priest was supposed to be. The crowd silenced instantly. You could have heard a pin drop.

Faintly, someone began sobbing. Bella smiled sweetly in that direction. She had her hands on the book reading thing, and was poised to give a speech. I didn't want to admit it, but I was really curious what she was going to say. Talk about herself as the savior of humanity or what? Vampires came in peace?

Bella began to speak. At first I thought I couldn't hear her because she was mumbling. But then I realized there really was no sound coming from her mouth. Except I felt it inside. A strange feeling of peace invaded me. Words that made no sense began popping into my head, from some sort of angelic language. Enochian?

The crowd began to sway. I felt dizzy. The big hands on my shoulders held me steady as around us the world began to careen. The words began to hammer through me and I felt that feeling of peace intensify. Bella was walking forward towards the pews, moving her hands as if directing a chorus. The words pulsed through me and I knew I shouldn't know them, but they took on meaning for me.

What meaning? I couldn't put it into words. My body was numb and I was swaying back and forth with the crowd. The air pulsed around us. My eyes felt heavy and the light hurt.

The silent words began coming faster, rhythmically more and more intense. The meaning was overwhelming. It was something about peace and peace, but in such a way that... I don't know.

Faintly, I heard sobs from the other side of the chapel. Nothing in me was disturbed. Iu knew they weren't in danger, that nothing was in danger in this peace.

And then I cracked open. There was no other way to explain it.

It was if all of a sudden I'd broken beyond the limits of my body, of my own soul. I was no longer just me, a soul amongst so many. I could feel them, touch them. Ecstacy shone through me like a white light that radiated from within and I felt oneness with everything, everyone in this place. I could feel the energy on a different, more pure level than before. I was powerful enough to control the universe. I was beyond my own limits of existence. I could, I could -

I must have passed out. Because the last thing I remember was that pure, unbridled ecstacy. Then the next thing I knew, a voice was calling me.

"Chaos, Chaos," a sweet voice was saying.

I felt my body being shaken, but it didn't seem to fit me anymore. It felt foreign, like a dirty old sock you had to put on.

"Chaos," and I recognized it as Bella. Bella! My heart thudded at the thought of her. Curiosity is what I told myself it was. In fact it was love. Adoration. Something in me craved her, because she was ecstacy.

I forced my eyes open, coming into my body and fitting into it dingily. Before me, Bella was grinning. She was patting my cheeks. At the sight of her, my soul flipped. Bella! My hand reached out and snatched at her, a strangled cry in my throat.

"Shhh," she caught my hand and pressed it to her shoulder. My breath came ragged as emotions flooded me like a chemical rush. I knew that if only she willed it, I'd be back in that state-

"It's alright. Stay with me," she was saying gently and my mind had no choice but to focus on her words. I wanted them so bad. "You went under deep, didn't you?"

I released a ragged breath. Somewhere, alarm bells were ringing in my head, but I had no idea what was happening. I'd never heard of anything like this. All there was was this feeling, and Bella. She who was taking my hand in both of hers now and squeezing it tightly while giving me such a comforting smile. "You're okay," she said in that sweet tone.

I gulped air. My body didn't want to stay like this. I was like an addict needing another rush, craving it. But as Bella squeezed my hand and I looked into her blue blue eye, the burning need began to subside.

"There," she said. "there you go. Come on, sit up."

I was lying on a church pew. There were a few straggling humans here and there, but the church was now fairly empty. The big beefy dude was standing beside me, glowering down smugly.

Gingerly, I managed to sit up. I wanted to barf. I was sweaty, clammy. Bella crouched before me, grinning wildly now. "So?" she asked eagerly, like we were sharing a secret. "Are we that bad?"

I took another look around. I told myself to take my hand from hers, but couldn't. I liked her touch. I swallowed, my mouth now dry. "What happened?"

Bella patted my hand. "Secret!" And she drew up to a standing position. "Come on."

I stood up gingerly, not really trusting my limbs to hold me. But they held. Bella guided me out of the aisle and led me outside of the chapel. I was not prepared for that gust of cold air. It was cold! So cold!

Chuckling, Bella pulled her hat on. I hugged Mark's jacket around myself. I didn't so much realize that we had let go of our hands as I felt it as an emptiness within myself. I told myself it was nothing. But still, those alarm bells within me were ringing.

"So," I said as Bella began walking forward to the skidoos. "What just happened? Why did you show me that? Why?"

"Well aren't you full of questions?" asked Bella with a smile as she drew to a stop by her skidoo. She pulled on a pair of gloves and pulled her turtleneck higher up on her throat. I couldn't help but notice how soft her skin looked. But I refused to be distracted. My head was a bit more on my shoulders, that strange craving for her now only a tiny feeling in my gut. So I crossed my arms, told myself to digest that feeling, and scowled.

"What's your plan? What – why even show me that?"

But Bella grinned at me. My heart flip-flopped stupidly. "Because I like sharing," she said sweetly. "I like giving people answers to their questions. So," she fiddled with her skidoo helmet. "What's your next question?"

I took a breath. Really? Was this going to be that easy? A question about the portal almost slipped from me. But I stopped. If I really wanted to know - "Where's Mark? What'd you do to him?"

She ducked her head, grinning widely. The vampires looked concerned. "What?" I asked. "You said you like giving answers."

"Mark, ah, had an accident," she said with the smile that said she was lying.

"Really?" I asked. "Well I still want to see him. And Leo."

Bella's eye twinkled. "Well then, let's do that, shall we?"

I hesitated. "Really?" What, was she letting me dig my own grave?

"Really," she nodded at the vampires. "Let's go."

And off we went.

I was expecting us to go to the hospital, or to suddenly transport into a medieval dungeon where bits of Mark would be hanging around. Instead we went to a mansion. It wasn't quite quaint. It was modern (Ish?) with giant windows, peaked towers, and well, it was huge. I sort of wondered why Bella wasn't living her instead of her small victorian-era home. Was she just into vintage?

"Here we are!" Bella announced as she drew off her helmet and I awkwardly got off the skidoo behind mcwhateverhisnamewas. She pulled her gloves off and gestured to the house with a large grin towards me. "The center!"

"The-?" I balked. Was she really showing me something important?

"Center," she said, dropping her skidoo helmet into the seat. "Our intelligence center, where we keep people who are problematic, and where," she shrugged "Our center is."

I blinked. The center. There was going to be a portal at the center. Whoah. She just spelled it out for me.

She flashed her trademark smile at me. "What's that face for?"

I shook myself. "N-nothing."

The other vampires didn't look so certain however. They were giving me the stink eye. I did my best to put on a casual smile. Wouldn't want to give away that she'd just solved my biggest problem for me.

Well, up we walked to the door. Big, imposing, double doors. I was expecting some sort of high-tech fingerprint or eyeball-checking security system. No such thing. We just walked straight on in.

My alarm bells rang at that. Why was she so trusting? How come they could afford to just – no security? It made me frown as we walked in.

"Namastay!" cheered someone so happily that I jumped. Whoah. Right there, just a few steps in, a cluster of vampires were standing around and sipping out of water bottles.

"Namastay, namastay!" said Bella so happily as she strode on in through them. She hugged several members and patted others on the back. "How is everyone?"

My brain balked. What the hell? The vampires had the same adoring eyes for her that the humans had. They chirpily told her that oh, everything is good, grand mistress, all good.

"Excellent," crooned Bella. She reached for me, gesturing me over. I slowly scraped over, letting my feet slide grudgingly over the floor.

Mcsomething or other shoved me forward so I stumbled next to Bella. Bella took me by the shoulder and righted me with a crick. "This is Chaos," she said sweetly, her fingers digging into my shoulders one second and caressing me the next.

A general coo went up, like I was a baby. Adoring eyes went from Bella to me. Bella's hand slid across my shoulders to hug me sideways. "She's visiting!" said Bella excitedly. "So let's all be on our best behavior, okay?"

I gingerly looked around, hoping I wasn't blushing ridiculously. Bella was holding me so close. So tightly. It was... very nice to say the least. Something in my gut was twisting free, squealing in joy at the attention just as I found it strange, very strange.

After some aimless chatter, I was led away, my hand in Bella's. "I'm sure you're very worried about your friends," she said happily as we walked down the entrance hall.

"Very," I muttered, looking everywhere but at her while all my attention was on our hands together. I didn't want to let go. It felt so nice.

Up a flight of stairs we went, vampire troupe still in tow. Into endless corridors we went. The place stunk of old money, old luxury, that had all been torn down. There were spots where paintings had been removed from walls. The bannister was pointedly not polished, full of grummy handprints. The corridor was making me sneeze.

"Too much fur?" teased Bella.

"Is there cats here?" I asked, sniffling.

Bella shook her head. "It's the werewolves you're smelling."

"Uh- huh," I grumbled. I knew no werewolves had escaped hell. That, they had been sure to tell me. Only vampires on the run.

And then a door opened and – yeah, those were werewolves. My jaw practically hit the floor. The werewolf in charge (some muscly dude with a mohawk) did the same. His eyes bulged and a look of sheer panick crossed his face, eyes flitting from me to Bella. Then to our joined hands.

He made a sound, pointing at me.

"This is Chaos," said Bella as we walked up to them.

"I – know," said Munch, as I liked to call him. Munch and I never got along. He was dumb. He ran a small gang that always got into trouble with ol' Beelzebub and – wait a minute. They'd been really quiet lately, hadn't they?

"Chaos is visiting," said Bella, swinging sideways to bump her shoulder against mine like we were best buddies.

Munch chewed on that for a minute, jaw working. He ogled me, then again, our hands. "Okay," he said finally. Bella flashed him a grin. Then, leading the way on, she gestured him to come along. "How have our guests been doing?" she asked as Munch tailed along sheepishly at her side. By his expression, I guessed that he wasn't used to this much attention from her.

"Good," he mumbled, making part of my brain explode. Munch? Mumbling? Whoah. Usually this dude just up and yelled every word in people's faces. For him to be so docile...

I eyeballed Bella. She just looked so sweet. Hmph.

Up another flight of stairs, we were suddenly swamped by the smell of chemicals. "This is the science flight," she said happily, stating the obvious. There was a cluster of scientists here and there in the hallways, all whispering excitedly at our passage. One quickly stepped forward and opened the door for Bella, who smiled so sweetly at them as we went through.

And there was Mark.

He was shirtless, his hair a grimy mess. Propped up in a hospital bed, he was restrained by cuffs and tubes coming out of his veins. He was utterly unconscious, looking almost peaceful.

"See?" Bella pulled me to his bedside, where she planted me beside a drip-bag-thing that was connected to Thor's tubes. "He's not all that bad, is he?"

I had to say that she was right, actually. I'd been expecting, well, much worse than him to be simply incapacitated.

"He tried to run away," said Munch, crossing his arms across his chest and flexing. "We tried our best but," he gestured to Mark's arms and wrists, where there was some bruising. But that was minor, right?

"And Leo?" I asked, mouth dry.

"Right here!" cheered a vampire from behind us as Leo himself was pushed in.

Leo was in fresh clothes, wearing a lab coat and a very, very, unhappy expression.

"See?" said Bella. "All fine!"

Leo gave her a hateful look. Munch flexed again.

"Can we talk? Alone?" Leo said, glaring at me like I was to blame for the universes' problems.

Bella looked at me. A frown crossed her face.

"Please?" I asked.

And that was all it took? Again, her smile returned. She left, and everyone else followed, looking quite puzzled. The door was shut.

"What are you thinking?" hissed Leo, walking to my side. "We've got to get out of here!"

I looked around, puzzled. "Really? I mean, this place is weird but-"

Leo rolled up his sleeves and showed me several pinpricks. "They keep injecting me with 'vitamin B'," he hissed. "Have you found the portal yet?"

I looked around to avoid looking at him. "No, but I know it's going to be in this building."

Leo snorted. "Good job, kid. You're really on top of things."

"They're not being awful," I argued back.

He squinted at me. "So you too are going to start singing praises about Her?"

I flushed. "No."

"Yes. Do you know why Mark tried to run away last night?"

My mouth was dry. "No. Why?"

"I don't know. But they used quite some technology and magic to heal him." he gestured to Mark. "He didn't look that good earlier on."

I wanted to kick myself for being so gullible. But then again, what really was wrong here? Everyone seemed so happy... "You're right," I said flatly. "Something's wrong." People just aren't this happy. Besides, if Lucifer wanted this place shut down, there had to be a good reason, right?

"They've got information that," the door opened and Bella strode back in. Leo scowled.

"So? All caught up?" she asked sweetly.

I caught myself smiling back at her. She was so sweet. So pretty. "Yeah," I said without thinking. Beyond Bella, Leo glared at me. Like, really glared. He wanted to murder me.

Chapter Eight

"So are you feeling better now that you're seen your friends?" Bella asked as we left the floor for the stairs. Our hands were entwined again and that was making my heart do somersaults.

"Yeah," I said breathlessly, watching her from the corner of my eye. What was it Leo had been wanting to tell me? It couldn't be that terribly important, could it?

Bella hummed, pleased, and we kept walking in silence. I wondered so many things right then. What had really happened with Mark? Why Leo was back in a lab coat, evidently helping them out when he'd been so adamant to speak against them... were they forcing him to work? And if so, why was I getting the royal treatment out of all of us? She couldn't do this for all the visitors. Why me?

Why, why, why – We reached the bottom of the stairs, walking out into the entrance hall. There were vampires in tow, vampires hanging around, and the little secretary's desk at the entrance. My head was swimming with thoughts and I nearly kept walking when Bella drew to a stop.

"Hmm?" I turned to face her. Her fingers tugged me closer. A wry smirk was on her lips. I glanced at the vamps behind her, who were dutifully watching, blank-faced. But Bella was pulling me to stand before her. Her blue eye twinkled, her smile viciously excited.

"There is an announcement to be made," she said as I stood before her.

"Oh?" I felt like something was flying straight over my head.

She stepped forward. I didn't move back, instead tightening my grip on her fingers. My hand rose up between us as she stepped into my metaphorical bubble. Somehow it landed on her shoulder limply instead of stopping her final step closer. Her hand rose up for the back of my head and my mind went blank. She pulled me forward.

We kissed, her hand holding the back of my head firmly.

Well, my heart did all the flip-flops it could. My stomach was filled with butterflies. That euphoria returned from within, rising up within me in a flicker. I was happy, truly happy.

When we separated she had an eerie smile on. "I think you should stay," she whispered, her blue eye nearly glowing it was so bright.

"Sure," was the smartest thing I could think of saying. Because I couldn't think. My head was all abuzz, my body felt like it was fluttering, and I was filled with excitement bordering on euphoria. I just wanted to kiss her again.

She grinned. "Good," and she began to march past me, out the building. I kept tow, not daring to look behind because I was sure my face was on fire and I had the dumbest grin on.

I swear, I felt glares on my back. Outside, the cold was burning on my face compared to the heat I had boiling within. I was full of butterflies, moths, fireflies, bed bugs, you name it. I had the jitters, bad.

Bella drew to a stop before her skidoo. She maybe winked at me, or just blinked. It was hard to tell with the eyepatch. "You can ride with me," she said.

Yay! It felt like an ice cream cone on a birthday. A bit silly, but meaningful and sweet. Sickeningly sweet.

Did I still have alarm bells going off in my head? Questions? No. My head was blank now and filled with her. She was all I could think about. How fabulous she was. How amazing. Sweet and kind.

The next thing I knew, there were no skidoos following us. We were alone, drifting out of the city. Fields upon fields of snow whizzed by, complete with cutesy little farm houses and the occasional horse or herd of brave cows.

We came to a stop at the crest of a hill. There, Bella dismounted. I followed suit, watching with hearts in my eyes as she pulled off her helmet and shook her hair free. Then, a grin was turned my way.

"I wanted to bring you here since I laid eyes on you," she said.

I looked around. Snow drifts gave way to peaceful valleys and a river swirling through it all. There was no farmhouses, no humans, no nothing but snowy fields.

I put my hands in my jacket's pockets. "It's beautiful."

She gestured with an arm. "There's nothing like this in hell," she declared. "Only here."

I almost corrected her. Almost. Sure, there was icy plains of absolute pain and bla di bla in hell, if you looked hard enough. But it was not like this. This was... nice.

"I want you to join me," she said, leanign back against the skidoo. Her hand lay over my arm. "I see beautiful things in you, Chaos. I want you to join with me."

I found myself looking into that brilliant blue eye as it was turned towards me. "I believe in you," she said.  
My heart fluttered. When was the last time anyone had said that to me? "Really?"

But she nodded, smile pure and sincere. She plucked my hand from my pocket and lifted it to her lips. She kissed my knuckles. "We could do great things together. Tell me you're going to stay. Tell me you'll stay by my side."

My heart twisted on itself, like it was trying to run in two directions at once. It was painful. "I," I croaked.

"Please," she whispered.

It hurt. I ducked my head. Tears rose to my eyes, and the whole situation felt unfair. Why didn't I get to choose where I would be in this whole mess? Besides, what was she doing that was so wrong anyways? She just... wanted to save people?

I pulled myself up. "You have to be honest with me."

A flicker of a smile came over her. But she was serious when she said "Yes."

I nodded, gulping. Swallowing the fact that I really had promised to go home, to do just my mission, and to do nothing else. My head bowed and I knew how disappointed everyone would be with me.

A finger lifted my chin to look at her once more. "Promise me you'll stay by my side."

"I promise," I whispered without thinking, following the tug in my heart. It hurt to hear myself say it, to know that I was breaking my word to my family for her. But they hadn't treated me right either, sending me here without the full knowledge of what was going on – the full knowledge of her.

Bella leaned in, hand sliding to grip in my hair, and we kissed. "I really like you," she whispered against my lips.

"I," was all I could croak as she drew back, gazing into me. I hurt. I was happy. I was so confused. I wanted to cry.

She seemed to know this. Pityingly, she took my head in both her hands and pressed our foreheads together. Her eye closed and she began mouthing words.

I felt them in my heart, reverberating with meaning and wisdom. I held on to her shoulders, shuddering as that strange euphoria came over me again. A white light seemed to fill me. It was bliss, lighter and gentler than before. I craved more. I wanted the same intensity that she had created in the church. But the words grew quieter now that the light filled me. They faded within me, takign the bliss with them and leaving me wanting more.

"Feel better?"

I blinked and saw her smiling at me. "Yeah," I whispered, wondering how she could do that. I was no longer upset. More... muffled? The white within seemed to have quieted the storm but it wasn't gone. Just tucked away.

I shook my head, trying to clear my mind and reorganize my thoughts. More like get them working again. "How do you do that? What is it?"

Now she really did wink. "Secret."

I punched her lightly on the shoulder. "No, really. Tell me!"

She laughed. "No. You're not awakened yet. It will mean nothing to you."

"But," I protested. She shook her head, facing the fields once more and shifting so our shoulders pressed together.

"No buts," she said strictly. "You don't have a choice in this."

I scowled and leaned against her. She leaned as well, and now we were propped on each other. My fingers slid down her side in a silent plea. She gave me her hand, and we twined together in the cold.

"So what's the plan?" I asked as a biting wind swept over us.

"Lunch," she announced. "You must be hungry."

I laughed. "No, that's not what I meant. What's your plan? Overall? Why bring all the vampires and werewolves to earth?"

Bella smiled out at the fields. But she was silent.

I whined. "Come on. Tell me something."

She let go of my fingers and crossed her arms haughtily. "You tell me," she said sweetly, leaning her head almost onto my shoulder. "What do you know of me?"

"Nothing," I admitted. "I don't know anything about you. You've not shown me a thing!" And now I was promised to her side... how had this happened? So quickly too?

Bella was all grins. "You know something. Tell me what you know."

"I don't even know your real, original, name! Who you are, where you come from- I didn't even know there was a 'you' in charge here! Come on," I whined playfully, prodding her ribs, but she apparently wasn't ticklish at all. I propped my chin on her shoulder. "Tell me what you're up to."

Her smile vanished. "You didn't know about me? Interesting." She ran a hand over my hair, petting me. "Why were you sent here then?"

I cringed at giving that away. "I shouldn't tell you." Should I? Hadn't I already set my dice in her camp, so to speak?

"Really?" she seemed hurt. "Alright."

I bit my lip and pulled her into my arms, her back against my chest and my chin on her shoulder. I buried my face in the warmth of her neck. "I was sent to close a portal you were opening in your center."

"The portal?" she asked sharply, stiffening, then relaxing. "That's what they're worried about?"

I nodded against her skin, squeezing my eyes shut against myself. I shouldn't have told her. But it felt so right to have her in my arms, to feel her relaxing back against me.

"That's insignificant," she drawled. Again, she stroked my hair. "Don't worry about it. It's nothing."

I wanted to believe her. So I kissed the skin of her neck, just above her turtleneck and beneath her ear. "Are you really opening a portal to unleash hell on earth?"

She laughed. "That's a dumb plan, Chaos. I'd like to think I'm more creative than that." Her gentle touch turned rough, gripping my hair tightly so I hissed. She turned around in my arms, holding me still while she smiled at me. "I'm going to save everyone, Chaos. It's a little more complicated than 'unleash everyone's minions upon the realm of incarnation'. Trust me."

"I trust you," I said honestly, openly. It was true. Something visceral in me felt connected to her and deep down, I felt that she could do no harm.

Her lips quivered in her smile, itching to turn into a grin. "So stop asking so many questions," she said playfully.

"No," I said back, just as playfully. I tried to lean in for a kiss but she held me back by my hair.

"No is not an answer for me," she said semi-seriously. "You're going to learn."

"Learn what?"

"Everything," she released my hair and turned to the open field again. "Soon, we're going to have so much to do it's going to be hectic. That's why I need you."

My heart fluttered happily at the thought of being useful to her, of being by her side. Our fingers wrapped around each other as we settled again side-to-side. We nestled together sideways, and it was so peaceful.

I didn't know for when, but I knew I'd hold onto that moment for time to come. It was picturesque and perfect. Us, together.

It had to end. Bella ordered our helmets back on as the sound of skidoos was heard across the fields. "Something's happened," she said, eyes narrowing.

"How do you know?" I asked, curious of whether she had a special psychic connection with her minions. I was hoping she didn't, out of jealousy.

But she just tapped her cheek, pointing at her angel's eye. "I'm an angel, sweetie," she said charmingly. My heart fluttered. She was cute, in a funny kind of way.

As the three skidoos arrived, we were ready, helmets on. They just had time to skid to a stop beside us when Bella said "Let's go," and gunned her engine.

We didn't go back to town. Instead we wound through the pine forest, following deer trails that Bella seemed to know very well. I clung to her, feeling my heart pound in my chest. I hoped that whatever the trouble was, it was human. Please, I wished to the great Goddess, mother of all gods, please let it be human. I wasn't sure how I'd manage to face someone from home. What would I say? I'd look ... stupid. But how could I put into words all that had happened to me in the past day? This strange bond with Bella? How could anyone explain that?

As I was busy worrying, time went on. Too soon, we burst out of the pine forest and onto a road. There, at an intersection, was a giant portal. There was burn marks across the road, and melted prints leading away from it.

We all skidded to a halt, making sure not to run over the tracks. My heart sunk down into my stomach as we stepped off the motorcycles and shedded our helmets. The wind whistled eerily between the trees, sweeping dust-like snow across the drifts.

"So," said Bella, Marching towards the portal. "What do we have here? Chaos!"

I trotted to her side, hands in my pockets. "Yes?" I tried to ignore the dirty looks from the vampires, including mister Mcbigbigguy.

She pointed to the portal. "Tell me what you know. Friends from home?"

I sniffed the air. "No." It didn't smell like hell at all. Rather, the portal smelt ... pine and ... Crisp. Airy?

"Air realm," I announced. Then I looked down at the very solid tracks. Wolves. "Native American pantheon," I guessed, heart sinking lower and lower. They were here for Al.

"Here for your friend?" asked Bella with a sneer. "Very good."

I startled. "How-" was she reading my mind?

She smirked at me. "I know she wasn't the one who destroyed the vampire carriage. It was you, idiot."

I flinched at her harsh words. So strange coming from her.

But then she smiled sweetly. "Come on, make yourself useful. They've probably already found your girlfriend by now. They'll be back soon." she pointed to the portal. "this isn't meant to stay open long. It's a direct line home. In fact," she looked around. "Very interesting that they left it unguarded."

I shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. The cold was seeping through my boots. It was biting at my hands. Couldn't we just leave this alone? "So, uhm,"

"So, uhm," Bella said sharply. "Get ready. They'll be back any minute now. And we're not letting them go."

My heart sunk some more. It seemed that was all it was doing. "We're not?" I asked sheepishly. "I mean, if we just let them leave they won't cause any trouble."

"Just let them leave?" Bella laughed coldly. "And what then? They'll set up a highway through here? No Chaos, this is my realm. No one passes through without my permission."

"But she's not causing trouble, she just wants to go home-"

"You really think that?" she asked sharply. "Or did you really believe you were the only one they sent to deal with me?"

I shut my trap. Because yeah, I'd believed that. But now that she mentioned it, Al's appearance and choice to incarnate pointed to the opposite.

"Younger, smaller, spirits are harder to track down, like dust," said Bella. "So we wait for them to come to us."

There was a grunt of approval from the vampires. They drew their blades, at the ready. Bella pointed here, there, and there, placing everyone before the portal. Then she drew back, admiring her placements. "Perfect," she called out. "Except Chaos, who's standing smack in the middle of it all. Thank you Chaos, can you move?"

Her words stung. Why was she being so mean? What had I done? I shrugged. "Where do you want me?"

She pointed to the right, far to the right. She herself was trudging to the left. "We hold the sides so they don't run away." She announced.

I took up my position, cursing myself for acting so docile. Since when did I just take directions? But for Bella, I was willing to bend over backwards.

So we stood there, almost knee-deep in snow, wind whipping across our faces, and Bella giving me the coldest shoulder of all. It all stung.

Then, we heard the flapping of wings. Glowing blue eyes appeared in the forest at my side. Wolves padded out, an eagle flying among them. I cringed as the deer I had spotted in the car came out with them.

The eagle landed before me, taking the shape of Al's incarnation. "Hey, you," she said icily.

One of the wolves took a human shape, shifting into a burly native warrior in tribal dress. Al's bodyguard and my smallest fan. "Looks like you've made friends," he said sharply.

I didn't answer. I didn't know what to say.

"Come on," Al said angrily as she took my elbow. "Let's go."

"No!" I wrenched free.

Al startled, scowling at me. Her bodyguard glared me down. I swallowed. "I'm not going back," I announced. Then, in a mumble, I added "And I don't think you can either."

"What?" Al scoffed, looking around at the vampires around us. "Do you really think-"

Twang. Whoosh. It was all the warning I had before an arrow ripped through my shoulder and stabbed into Al.

I collapsed forward, crashing onto my knees, my hands clutching at the gaping wound in my shoulder. Stars of pain danced before my eyes. My mind reeled, trying to understand what happened. Al was doubled over, a red arrow jutting from her chest.

Another twang. Al's bodyguard yanked her out of the way just in time as another arrow came whooshing from directly behind me. It came so close to me.

The wolves jumped forward, bodyguard among them, carrying Al forward. I didn't turn my head to watch as they jumped past me. I was looking down at my purple-red blood spattering across the snow, steaming and melting into it.

What the hell, I thought. The only person behind me was Bella. It couldn't be her. It couldn't.

I staggered to my feet, only dimly hearing the crash of battle behind me. I turned, and saw the vampires being thrown aside by the warriors. Al was being carried into the portal. Bella drew a bow – she was carrying a bow?

My mind spun. The world spun. Nothing made sense. This was completely out of tune with the world within me, with that soft ecstacy I knew of Bella- how did this compute?

An arrow hissed through the air, thudding into the back of the bodyguard and ripping through him. He stumbled – but made it into the portal. With a cry from one wolf the warriors fell back with the deer, jumping through the portal. The vampires rushed, but it was too late. The portal closed with a hiss, vanishing on itself.

The silence was stunning. Suddenly there was just the sound of heavy breathing, the crunch of snow. Bella was walking towards me. Her bow had vanished.

"Chaos!" she called.

The world span. I took a step back. But she trotted over, grinning widely. "You did great Chaos!"

"What?" I babbled, mind spinning. In a rush, I was furious with her. Everything seemed clear. She'd abused me, used me, and shot me. Literally. I was nothing but a meat screen for her to hide behind.

"Chaos!" her hands were on either side of my head, her blue eye sparkling at me. I flung her hands off – or tried to. She had grips in my hair.

"Chaos," she said, her voice sweet. And then there was silence – but not within me. I heard sweet words within as her mouth moved. I felt pure love. Deep within, I knew that she loved me. That she was enamored with me, that the shot hadn't meant anything. It was overwhelming, like padding in the brain. I couldn't think, could only feel this fierce love, this burning sweet attraction.

Vampires were around me. They were watching, eyes glowing bright with magic as they circled around Bella and me. But they were just the backdrop, and Bella my focus. I barely noticed them, even as their hands touched me. I didn't even feel them catch me as darkness closed over me.

Chapter Nine

I woke up in a fog. The world felt coated in an invisible mist. I didn't place the room I was in, couldn't recognize that weird photograph on the wall, or the wallpaper-covered walls.

Dizzily, I sat up. My chest was bandaged, but my jeans were still on. There was no pain, but I guessed that was courtesy of my massive brain fog. Too much painkillers? I shifted to the edge of the bed and looked around. There was Mark's jacket and a pile of clothes.

I dressed like a robot. Recent events tumbled back at me, but I felt numb. There were no emotions in me to react to them. I felt aimless, empty. I wandered to the bedroom door and found myself wondering if it was a good idea. Maybe I should lie down. But I wasn't sleepy, just limp emotionally.

After a moment of standing before the door and staring at it while debating with myself, it opened. The burly vampire was there, with two other female vamps. They seemed surprised at seeing me. I just blinked, brain not registering anything.

We stood like that for a minute, them staring at me and me staring at them. Then, the burly vampire cleared his throat. He held up a greasy paper bag. "Your food," he said.

I didn't understand. My brain was just so slow. I pressed palms to the side of my head. One of the female vampires stepped forward and I recognized her from being one of Bella's troupe.

"Come on, you're supposed to still be in bed," she said, taking me by the elbows and steering me back into the room, then to the bed where she sat me down.

The room spun. I was guided down into the pillow, where I landed face-first. My arms didn't want to move. I drifted away.

"Hey!"

I jumped, yet my body barely moved. I blinked, but could barely lift my head now. I felt like I was getting worse. I dug my hands into the mattress to prop myself up. The vampires were watching me – with pity?

"You need to eat. It's going to absorb the poison," she said. The burly vampire was at her side now, offering what looked like greasy potatoes and a sandwich. The sight made me want to retch.

I shook my head, sliding back down into the pillows. My eyes drifted shut.

"Bella's going to be furious if you don't eat," she moaned. "Come on, please eat."

I felt something. It pierced my fog like a knife. Love. Bella. I was suddenly awake, mind sharp and cut open.

I struggled up onto my arms, then sat up. "Bella?" I asked. Within me, there was happiness, but it didn't make sense. Something in me was squealing like a fan just at the mention of her. I felt happy, light and giddy. Also nauseous.

The vampires nodded. The food was offered. "She wants you to eat," the burly dude said, and the woman nodded enthusiastically. I felt like a toddler being coerced to eat their vegetables.

Bella. My mind was full of her. Recent events, the bow, our happy time yesterday, it all clashed together in me with this intense coating of happiness. Of desire to please her. To just be beside her. This fascination.

I looked dizzily at them. Did they feel feel this way about her too? Was that why everyone followed her and why she wasn't their juicebox?

"W-why-" I tried to ask, but the food was put in my face.

"Eat!" they chorused together, but it wasn't mean. They just seemed frightened.

I took a bite of the sandwich and chewed. My mouth was dry. It was such a chore, but I got through it. Then, I dropped it into my lap. There, I'd done my part. Now for them.

"Why do you follow Bella?" I asked, thinking that yeah, I should havce been asking this days ago. Don't ask Bella the questions. Ask the minions.

They looked uneasily at each other. "You need to eat," the woman said. "Come on, eat some more."

"No!" I snapped. "Tell me!" I wasn't taking orders from them!

Again, they looked at each other. The woman crouched down before me, clearing her throat.

"Bella is our leader," she said, and again I felt like the toddler. "And we follow her."

"Why?" I croaked, feeling that I already knew the answer. I did, didn't I?

Again, they exchanged a look. The woman cleared her throat again and stood up. She dusted off her hands.

"You'll know once you're awakened," she said quietly. "Eat your sandwich now."

I wanted to throw the sandwich on the floor. But what would Bella do if I didn't eat it? I took a mouthful grimly.

"We're going to be around if you need anything. For now just stay in bed and rest. Let us know if you need anything," she said, drawing away.

The big hulking dude was about to say something. But he didn't. With a nod in my direction, he walked away. They closed the door behind themselves, and I was alone.

I really could have used some water, but got that sandwich down anyways. The potatoes could rot in hell. I flopped back down on the bed and let the mist cover me. It was as I was drifting away that I realized that I missed home.

"Chaos," a voice was calling. It brought back sweet memories and I knew I liked this person. But who was it?

My eyes fluttered open, and I saw cropped hair, a bright grin - "Al?" I asked. But then my vision shifted and the skin was too pale for Al. The hair too orange and fiery. "Bella!" I realized, my heart flip-flopping in excitement and joy. She was here.

But as she smiled so sweetly at me, I remembered everything else. How I was trapped from within out – and maybe everyone here was as well. But that couldn't be true, was it? She mustn't have meant to shoot through me. But she had to have.

My brain struggled with itself, intuition battling logistics. It must have shown on my face.

"Shh," Bella cupped her hands around my cheeks, thumbs caressing me. "Stop that. You're worrying too much."

"But," I muttered as she leaned over me, her blue eye glistening. I found myself holding onto her arms as if for dear life. Like she was the only thing holding me together.

"I'm here," she said gently. "It's okay."

Shamefully, that soothed me. Bella could take care of everything, that I knew innately. I knew she was practically the master of the universe – everything would be fine.

"There," and I realized I'd closed my eyes in relaxation. Surrender. She seemed so sweet and caring. "You're all right."

I nodded obediently. Whatever she wanted.

"Here," she shifted, climbing onto the bed to lay down at my side. My heart fluttered happily. I couldn't help but grin as she nestled next to me, her head on the pillow with me.

"So?" she asked. "How are you feeling now?"

"Better," I croaked. I was less foggy, I guessed. She nodded. Her hand caressed my shoulder, then played in my hair. She seemed to be thinking as she twiddled my yellow- orange hair. Then, she said "I'm very proud of you. You've done so good."

"Really?" my mind was baffled. She shot through me-?

She smiled, but it was regretful. "I know what you're thinking. I shot you. But Chaos, it was really important. And I know you're powerful and that you'd survive. I made sure to aim safely."

The back of my mind was not impressed. The rest of me fawned and brushed that aside. She hadn't meant it!

She held up a pinkie between us. "Pinkie promise that you forgive me?"

I laughed. So childish. But did I really forgive her? A niggling part of my brain was like 'no, it's not okay', but the rest of me was charmed.

She kissed me on the forehead, making warmth flood me. "Thank you for understanding," she whispered. "I really appreciate it." Then she kissed me on the lips.

My heart swam. Butterflies filled my stomach. I found myself gripping at her greedily. We kissed again, then deeper. Then, content, we nestled together, our foreheads almost touching. Her blue eye was nearly shining.

"You know, I feel like you understand me," she whispered. "Just you."

"Really?" I asked, flattered and touched.

She nodded. "We click." Then, with a laugh she added. "I wouldn't shoot just anyone, you know."

I laughed along with her, but I wasn't sure I should have.

Grinning, she continued. "I can just be with you. I don't have to impress you or be the boss." I nodded. "I really like you," she whispered. "I don't want to ever let you go."

"Me either," I whispered honestly. Our fingers found the other's, and we held onto each other. It felt like nothing could tear us apart. I closed my eyes, and our foreheads rested together. I was happy, blissful even, and I didn't care to wonder where that happiness came from. At least not then.

Later, when I woke up alone in the empty bed, I wondered at what had happened. The fog in my brain was gone. I had my head on my shoulders again, and I was thinking critically once more. But that really didn't make things any easier.

Bella loves me and I loved her, was what felt like an obvious conclusion. Just the thought of her filled me with butterflies and a giddy smile. But did everyone feel that way about her? Was it 'just' magic?

But she'd said I was different. She'd said that she loved me, practically.

And that was her excuse for shooting me?

I sat on the edge of the bed, agitated and grumpy. None of this made any sense. Not to me, anyways. Weren't abusers evil, cruel, and nasty people? Yet Bella seemed so kind to me. So sweet. So caring when she nestled next to me.

I chewed on a hangnail, wondering what I should do. I hadn't attacked Al, merely stood in the way – and they'd seen me get shot. Maybe I could claim that I was being held hostage or something and go back home.

But the thought of leaving Bella made me nauseous and deep down I knew I wouldn't. It just wasn't an option. I loved her. And I believed she loved me too. Maybe, maybe... an idea rose up within me, strange and unfiltered.

Maybe Bella was just warped. She was only part angel, after all. Maybe she just didn't know how to have a real relationship, what with having adoring fans and all that power.

I bit my hangnail too hard and bled beside it. Cringing, I sucked on my blood. My theory made sense. Bella did love me. She just didn't know what to do with me. Maybe she was ashamed even of loving me in front of others. But she loved me.

Yes, she loved me.

Convinced of my theory, I stood and ran a hand through my hair. The path before me was obvious now. I couldn't leave her just for being weird. What kind of person would I be to do that? No, I was going to stick by her. Maybe I could fix her. She probably didn't know, didn't understand even, that she had hurt me.

Yes, yes, I told myself. This all made sense.

Confident, I plucked up Mark's sweater, put on my boots, and strolled from the room.

Chapter Ten

Bella was in the living room (or was it a waiting room? Or a painting room? Why did these big places have such fanciful names for basic rooms?) that was near the entrance. There was a crackling fire in the fireplace, an array of snacks laid out on the coffee table, and she was sipping a coffee. Before her, around the table in various comfortable looking chairs, were the vampires that usually plagued her.

I stepped into the living room, wondering what I was going to say. Should I just act casual? That seemed a better idea than being all dramatic or just discreetly lurking in the entryway. But I didn't get the chance of choosing my mode of entry.

Bella looked up from her coffee, bright blue eye sparkling at me. "Chaos," she said warmly.

I couldn't help but grin at her. "Hey," I tried to lift my wounded arm and it twinged. Yeouch.

She nodded at the chair to her left, which was filled with the female vampire that had brought me the sandwich. "Sit. Join us. We could use your input."

My pride swelled, flattered at being needed. But was it right to take someone else's place? "Oh, I don't want to interrupt," I said as the vampire rose from her seat with a neutral expression.

"Sit," snapped Bella, suddenly in a bad mood.

Oh, okay. I could do that. Gingerly, I walked over and took the spot. The vampire stood, resting her elbows on the high backs of the chairs.

"So," Bella said to me as if keeping me up to speed. As if this was supposed to make sense to me. "The poison should have taken full effect now."

I blinked. "What poison?" I looked around. "Who's been poisoned?"

Bella's smile turned patronizing. Matronizing maybe? "Your ex-friend. The arrow? We gave you the antidote while you were sleeping, but they should be realizing its effects right now." She sipped her coffee. "So we can expect a messenger. Soon."

Al? Poisoned? I blanched. Her parents were high-ranking. Beloved of their pantheons, and beyond. Did Bella realize the shitstorm she was about to bring down on herself?

But she just sat there, smiling into her coffee. Smug, like she knew something special.  
"You poisoned Al?" I asked in a whisper. "Do you realize-" and I didn't know what to say. "Thunderbird is her parent-"

"I know," said Bella curtly. Then, her smile turned gleefully wicked. She propped an elbow on her armrest and leaned towards me. "But even of her caliber, the poison will have turned her mortal by now."

I almost stopped breathing. Mortal? Al? She was always so tough and unbeatable – mortal?

It took a hell of a wallop to turn a divinity mortal, really mortal. It didn't necessarily take away their powers, but it ... took away their ability to reincarnate. It took away their ability to return to the planar zones once dead. They died? They went straight back to the goddess, and it was up to her if they continued living or were recycled.

That couldn't be. It just – that was basically a death sentence!

Bella must have been reading the horror on my face. She laughed. "I have the antidote. Don't worry! Once we negotiate, she will be cured."

"Oh," I relaxed, feeling panic slip away from me. Of course. Bella wasn't cruel. She just wanted leverage. Which slightly explained why she'd been so determined to shoot through me. She needed to, at least in her mind.

"They're probably going to be very angry," she reasoned out loud, eyes scanning the table. "If they don't outright attack."

There was a pause. I fidgeted with Mark's sweater. "Why don't we send a messenger to them?" I asked cautiously. "Before they attack?"

Bella's eye landed on me. Chin resting on her fingertips, she seemed to consider my words. But when she spoke there was a bite of cruelty to it. "Because, we need their portal?" She gestured around the table. "Vampires can't just open a portal to the sky realm. To hell, yes, but not to the sky realm."

So? I was puzzled. "But can't you? Why don't you go?"

Bella's smile twisted into a grimace. "No." She picked up a chunk of sugar from the table and dropped it into her coffee, then neglected to stir it. "I'm not going anywhere."

I bit my lip, remembering how she'd stood so far back at the last battle. Was she a coward? Somehow that didn't seem right. She was too... strategic? Forward? She just didn't strike me as a coward. No, she was hiding something. Hiding herself maybe?

"But you don't want all the warriors of the tribes landing on here," I said with a half laugh. "They're going to decimate you." And I looked around the table, realizing that none of them had said a word since I'd arrived. "There's more of them than all of you," I added.

"Death is but a passage, Chaos," said Bella cheerfully. "And we need that portal."

My mind tripped on her words and fell flat on its face. I blanked for a moment, just staring at her. Bella started laughing. "Chaos, it's the only way the plan progresses," she said, gesturing around her. "We need to die."

WHAT?

"I don't understand," I said blankly. "I thought you were trying to build a utopia or something." A Buddhist utopia, no less. What was with all those Buddhas if she was just going to kill everyone?

"No!" Bella had a huge grin on. "I'm saving everyone! We will be free once we die. Then, with the portals open, we will be able to -"

"Queen!" a vampire burst into the room, still in their winter coat, grey skin sweaty.

"Yes?" Bella seemed downright excited. "Are they here?"

The vampire doubled over, panting. "The humans are. They're invading. And they've cut down our signals. We don't know how but-"

"Technology," muttered Bella, drawing the cellphone from her pocket and lifting it into the air. "Fascinating."

"They've crossed the barricades! They're coming from the city!" exclaimed the poor vampire. I wondered if they also knew the plan was to die, or if it was just Bella and her cohorts who knew. And now me.

"Well," Bella stood up, setting her coffee mug down. "We will simply-"

CRA-KOOM!

There was a sudden clap of thunder, making the table rattle and the vampires cover their ears. Bella paled. We caught each others' eye, both knowing what that was.

The Thunderbird had arrived, and vengeance was on its way.

Bella was barking orders left, right, and center. Everyone was snapping to. But was this really going to get us anywhere?

Already there were warriors pouring out of the giant portal in the middle of the city. They were merciless, and fast by the sounds of it that reached this far.

I followed Bella on her heels, running out into the streets to the skidoos. Right beside the skidoos she stopped and looked at the giant portal in the air. The thing was a humongous ring cracling with magic.

"Perfect," she breathed. "It's huge." Turning, she barked at one of the few vampires that hadn't been dispatched yet. "Go get the portal up! Place it properly this time!"

This time? What, there had been a 'before'? And place it -what for?

"What are we doing?" I asked.

"Chaos, I need you to stick beside me. Come on now," she said sharply before getting onto her skidoo without a helmet.

I jumped onto the thing with her just in time, and she took off without looking back. If my arms weren't around her waist, I wouldn't have known she knew I was there.

We skidded across town, across the flow of screaming and running humans. They were everywhere, running in the snow and falling in their haste.

We got to the cathedral. There, in the parking lot, was the portal. I was surprised at how easily Bella had found it in this maze of a city. Maybe she just knew that this just the easiest place to open this big of a portal? Maybe.

We skidded to a halt before the forming line of warriors in various traditional gear. They seemed to be waiting for something.

Bella stood off the skidoo and dragged me to her side. "I love you," she said hastily, almost without emotion. "But we have to stall. Trust me. This is going to work."

The portal before us crackled. A figure came out of it, and I winced at the appearing silhouette of the very specific traditional gear I'd seen a zillion times before. He hadn't been the most pleasant in-law, no fault of his own and (probably) all fault my own. He just hadn't appreciated my shenanigans, no matter how many excuses my parents came up with.

Just as the Thunderbird appeared, there was another clap of – not thunder actually, but more of an explosion. I spun, and across the town was another portal. A fiery one, and the wind now carried the scent of sulfur. A portal to hell. But whatever for? For the life of me, I couldn't figure it out, but Bella was giggling.

"Good, good, good," she said to herself, turning to face back the warriors and the Thunderbird. "Everything's so good."

I wasn't so sure of that. Here we were, facing down a line of what, a hundred warriors? And the freaking Thunderbird. Bella might be Nephilim, but that didn't mean necessarily a lot of power. What could she do?

"Time, time, time, we just need a little more," she muttered, pulling two handguns from her hips.

"What are you-?" I asked, wondering if she really thought that she was going to start shooting down with the Thunderbird. But then she pointed one gun to her head – and one at mine. "Shut up," she muttered.

I froze. There was a friggin' gun to my head. I'd heard enough 'this is how I died' stories from the people that ended up in our living room, retelling their tales, to know that a gun to the head was pretty serious.

The warriors startled. The Thunderbird wasn't moving.

"Come here Thunderbird!" Bella shouted. "Don't you want to talk?"

I gawked, looking from Thunderbird to Bella. Okay, okay, this was – a fucking disaster. What a mess had I gotten myself into?

Thunderbird began to stride forward. He was short for a spirit, but none the less imposing. His traditional robe fluttered around him. The warriors stepped out of the way as he strode towards us.

He stopped a mere few paces away. I felt sick with guilt at the sight of him. He'd never been really bad to me. He cared for his daughter endlessly. He didn't deserve this.

His dark eyes glared hard at me, then at Bella. "Who are you?" he demanded.

Bella giggled, high pitched. Her hands shook. "Tell the grim reaper to come here. Tell him if he doesn't come – I'm going to blow the head off his favorite kid. His favorite – mortal – kid." and she giggled some more.

Thunderbird paled. He looked again at me, and I wasn't sure if I was supposed to do something. Look petrified? Give him a thumbs up to show I had been given the antidote? I was just – not sure. My head was spinning a mile a minute.

"Yes, yes, yes," said Bella, her words tumbling over each other. "Two birds, one arrow, lots of poison – get the grim reaper!"

I was starting to wonder if she'd really given me that antidote. She'd better have, or this was one sick plan.

Thunderbird held up his hands. "We just want the antidote-"

"And if I blow my own head off, you're not getting it, are you? Are you? Get, the grim, Reaper!" She yelled.

"The Grim Reaper is far, far, away," said the Thunderbird in his deep, calm voice. "Maybe I can help you instead. What do you need?"

Bella laughed, high pitched and nerve-rattlingly. The barrel against my head was shaking. "I need, the third portal," she said, out of breath. "Get the Grim Reaper."

Thunderbird paused, hands still lifted in a placating gesture. "You-"

"Get him!" Bella screamed.

Thunderbird lowered his hands. He took a deep breath. Bella shoved the gun against my head, hard. "Or do you want to see this one die? Tell your friend that? That you could have saved his kid? Huh? You want that?" Her voice was rising again to a shrill pitch. "Do you?"

Thunderbird raised a hand. "I will send for the Grim Reaper," he said calmly.

Bella laughed. Not a twitter, not a nervous giggle, she straight up laughed. "Good!" she said "Finally."

With a determined look at me that spoke volumes, Thunderbird waved a warrior over. In hushed tones, he gave some order. The warrior promptly ran back to the portal, into which it vanished in the shape of an eagle.

Thunderbird turned back to Bella. "Now, let's talk."

"No," said Bella. "I'm not talking with you."

"The antidote," Thunderbird started gently.

"You'll get it when I get my portal! Now shut up!" Bella yelled.

There was a lengthy pause. Then, Thunderbird seemed resigned. But he did not walk away. He stood there, waiting with us. I was grateful for that, really. I didn't want him to go. In fact, I felt safer with him around.

It's not that I didn't trust Bella. She was just – not okay right then. And I really didn't know what she was going to do. What the hell did she want so bad that she would put a gun to my head? I knew that she loved me, that wasn't a question but the stakes here were higher for her than I was.

Time dragged on. I could imagine dad, doing his daily business of whatever, maybe in the living room taking a small coffee break. Then the warrior would burst in saying what? Your stupid Chaos got a gun to their head and are being held ransom for... a third portal?

Why a third one? To where?

I looked up to the sky, then down at the snow. We had a portal to up there, a portal to down there... where else could Bella want to go?

There was no answer in my head. My thoughts swam around and around. Bella breathed loudly, rapidly, beside me. Thunderbird stood there, stoic. I wondered if, as leader, he'd had to do this sort of thing before. He must have, right? I couldn't be his first hostage situation.

But maybe I was the most personal one he'd had. I was his in-law, after all.

There was a crackle and hiss that was heard on the air. It was soothing, a black mist that arrived in curls and tendrils. Bella's face burst into a grin.

Then, in a twitch of the darkness, the grim reaper was there beside Thunderbird, all black robes, skull, and scythe.

"Hello," he said in that gentle tone. "Whatever is the matter?"

"Your kids a mortal and I'll blow her friggin' head off if I don't get my third portal. Fair?"

Dad clasped his bony hands before himself, scythe crooked in an elbow. "Now what would you need a third portal for? You already have two right here, perfectly good ones-"

"I want – a third!" Bella yelled. "And you – of all people – you know what it's for! Complete, the triad!"

Triad? I looked at dad but uh, well, skulls are expressionless. He cocked his head to the side though, which usually meant he was thinking.

"Triad?" he said calmly. "Well I do not understand. A third portal would only be a repetition. That doesn't make anything special."

Bella sort of gasped, sort of laughed, then licked her lips. Her chest was heaving for air and she was sweating in the cold. She didn't even have a coat on, I realized. "Give me, the portal, to Nirvana," she said, dangerously low and not screaming.

Oh, shit, everyone thought at the same time. You could see it on Thunderbird's face. In the way father's bone hands tensed. But his voice was gentle as he spoke again.

"Nirvana? Neither here nor there? Dear, you won't be able to get in. It's only for the awakened or those whom Amitabha accepts. Even if I make you the portal, I can't force your way into there."

Awakened? Was that the same 'awakening' that Bella had been talking about? Oh crap, oh crap.

It was all piecing horribly together into my head. Bella had never intended to create a utopia. She was going to break her way into one, by force. She was going into the Pure Lands with her army to steal the Buddha's throne.

Or something like that.

Bella half laughed, half spoke "Oh trust me, I'm quite sure,"

Pow.

Everyone jumped. Bella stumbled two steps forward. The hand that was holding the gun to my head dropped, the gun landing in the snow.

Blood spread too quickly over Bella's chest. Her eyes were huge, her breath wheezing now as she clutched at the giant bullet hole beside her heart.

Before I knew it my arms were around her. "Bella? Bella!"

From the corner of my eye I saw humans, army, walking into the parking lot.

Dad was before her now, crouching down. He was murmuring gently and I knew he was preparing to accept her soul once he finished his recitation.

"No," I whispered. In a rush, I didn't want Bella taken from me. Where would they take her? What would they do to her?

Bella's head rolled to my shoulder, her blue eye sparkling at me. Her mouth moved, and I felt the words within me.

She loved me, she wanted to hold me in her arms, she was sorry. It rushed up like a white cloud within me, filling me with her.

Then she lifted her gun and pulled the trigger, without even closing her eyes or moving her gaze from mine.

Bam. Blood spattered all over me.

I was screaming, kneeling in the snow. Bella was in my arms, limp and self-destroyed. I cradled her against me, shaking her gently. I wanted her back, I just wanted her back.

The white feeling of love had vanished when she'd pulled the trigger. Now I missed her like a gaping hole within myself, a bloody, torn hole filled with barbs that stung every time I moved.

Cradling over Bella, I found myself rocking back and forth. I wasn't sure what else was happening. The screaming had stopped and now I was shaking with sobs. People were around me but I didn't care.

My arm was being shaken. "Chaos, Chaos, Darling?"

I didn't so much look up as I knew that was my mother. When had she gotten here? Time was shifting around me and I was flashing in and out of it.

The next thing I knew, Bella was being pried from my hands by several warriors. Bone hands held me as I grappled to keep Bella with me. "No, no!" I screamed again.

Her body was laid in the snow, at the feet of a fox-faced commander with a grin on. "We'll keep this, you can keep that," she said, gesturing at me.

I grappled one last time. Bella's eyepatch came off into my hands. Then she slipped away for good.

It was just another rip inside of me. Another gaping plunge of her being gone. I was lifted to my feet and turned away, but I wasn't walking. I couldn't. My legs were giving way but I was being carried by my shoulders by so many hands. The portal to the sky was approaching. I supposed they wanted to take me anywhere away from here – but I didn't want to go.

I managed to twist around. At first I didn't see Bella anymore. There was just a cluster of humans, and a large white bag they were lifting onto a stretcher. Leo was there, speaking with FoxFace.

We passed through the portal, and the world swirled – but it was too much. I slipped into darkness.

Chapter Eleven

Bella. She was all I could think about, all I could feel the lack of. No matter how warm I was, there was a pit inside my stomach, an emptiness that refused to be filled.

I had been allowed to return home, but remembered little of getting there. The days were hazy, time drifting on and off. I drew the blankets to my chin and refused to see the world. Bella was gone. I couldn't change clothes, didn't have the strength to wash. I lay in bed in the same filth for what felt like weeks on end. Mother came and pleaded with me to rise, then father, then mother again. They tried kindness, sternness, and bribes. I barely heard them.

The emptiness from within was eating me out. I felt the lack of Bella as a physical weight that was dragging me down. I drifted in and out of sleep, of nightmares, of seeing Bella's eye as she blew her brains out. Of seeing the exact moment the light left her.

I clutched at the eyepatch like it was a link, a tribute, a something that could connect us still. It was pitifully little. I clutched at it, cradled it to my chest, but it did nothing. It brought me no warmth, no smell, nothing to hold to my chest that would fill me.

"They're all doing that," said a voice through my mist one day. It was right next to me, but I didn't move to greet the presence. My back was to my room. I was hiding the eyepatch beneath a pillow and feigning sleep, not that I could have drawn myself truly awake.

"What do you mean?" mother's voice was frightened.

"They're just pining away. All of them," said the voice, not bothering to hush themselves.

"What do we do?" said father's voice this time.

There was no answer. They left my room. I fell back asleep, clutching at the eyepatch like it was a lightning rod that would bring me back to life.

Instead I found myself dropping into deeper and deeper sleeps and waking less and less. Mother was trying to make me drink. Father was sitting next to me, reading books aloud. Al was visiting, sunglasses atop her head and blue eyes shining. These were just glimpses, snippets between patches of darkness.

Then, one day, I broke. I knew that something had happened. The depth I was falling into was somehow different. I was collapsing in on myself. I didn't wish for help. I wanted it to be over. There was no point to anything anymore, so it might as well be over.

I felt myself slipping, returning to the source of All. Floating, dissolving, falling apart. As I came apart, something stepped out of me.

"Hello," Bella's voice whispered to me, her blue eye shining, the eyepatch still solidly in place, still wearing her usual spikes and buckles.

"Bella!" I cried out. "Bella!"

She reached out and I felt myself draw together at her command. "Come here," she whispered. I struggled, pulling myself into one until I stood before her. Her fingers brushed my cheek. "My Chaos," she murmured, her touch gliding around to fist into my hair then drag me into her embrace.

I fell against her, tears finally flowing from within. I latched onto her, wishing to never let her go.

Her lips brushed against my ear. "Chaos, Chaos, my Chaos," she murmured, nuzzling into me. Then, in a different tone, an electrifying word. "Awaken."

It was electricity in my blood. I jolted as what felt like parts of myself came to life that had never before breathed life. I felt whole, new, energized and powerful.

She pulled me from her, pushing me to stand before her. I gawked. It was as if I was seeing her with new eyes, eyes that saw her on a whole new level.

It was like the great Source was living within her. She wasn't just named the Queen, she 'was' the ultimate, majestic, and Source.

I fell to my knees. I stuttered. "M-my Queen," I blabbered, overcome.

She smiled at me. Her fingers stroked my chin, tilting me so she could see me better. Then she turned my chin left, then right, examining me. She ran her fingers through my hair, then dragged my head down into a bow.

"Listen very carefully, Chaos," she said. My heart hammered in my throat. I stared down at her feet, my hands pressing into the earth beside them.

She spoke, and for the first time I heard the words. Here, within myself, the sound was real.

I struggled to not be overcome by them. I tried to focus on the sounds, to memorize them. But within me, the strange tidal wave was rising, the artificial joy and happiness mixing into a cocktail of ecstasy. I struggled to resist, focused on my breathing, shuddering, then focused on the sound of her words again. But it was pointless. In a rush the ecstasy overcame me like a wave. I cried out, then collapsed to the earth.

Twitching on the earth, I didn't feel my body anymore. I felt dissolved, free, emanating and communing with not the Source, but Bella. I felt bare before her. Free for her to take, to use.

In a rush that was certainly a will from Bella, I was back together and the ecstasy was over. I was gasping, heart hammering, but I didn't feel empty. I felt filled, alive, satisfied.

Climbing back up to my knees, I stared at her. My mind was empty of coherent thoughts, but filled with wonder and awe at her. I felt ready to drop down and worship her, she seemed so awesome.

"Listen," she ordered, bending over to cup my face with her hands. And again, she repeated the words. This time slower. This time more enunciation.

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing every part of me to remember those sounds. To please her. To be perfect for her.

The world shifted. I felt like my lungs were opening up, like I could breathe again. My limbs were revitalized. I was so powerful, so immense and strong-

I sat up in my room, breathing heavily and tangled in the blankets. I gasped for air, looking around, expecting to see Bella here. But she was nowhere to be seen. I pressed a palm to my chest, wondering if she was within me, or had that just been a figment of a deranged imagination?

Whatever! I threw off the blankets and walked away for a shower.

After washing up, eating, and taking a look at myself in the mirror, I had the sudden urge to 'find out'. Find out what? Why? I paused, staring at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I had obviously lost weight in my ... how many day starvation binge? The orange in my hair had grown out, leaving my 'do looking a bit funny. I'd have to do something. Something different, I decided.

In a wave, the urge to 'find out' returned. I brushed it aside. There was time for that later. Or maybe never. Life could return to normal now. Now about my hair-

A wave of panic rose in me, so acute that I felt nauseous. I gripped the edge of the bathroom sink. The world span. Clear as day, I knew that I had to 'find out'.

Message sent, the sensation subsided. I breathed deeply, willing the nausea away.

Okay, maybe my hair could wait. Just maybe.

After grabbing another snack from our kitchen that we shared with another dead-ish family, I shrugged on a black jacket and donned my bracelets and necklaces, just in case. Then, wholly convinced that there was nothing to 'find out', I left the house.

I told myself that I was just on a little stroll. I was just following my instincts, I told myself.

But the truth was that my instincts had never manifested with anxiety disorders. I'd never felt all too anxious about anything in life, even when I should have. But I brushed it all aside. I was just out for a walk in the earth realm, otherwise known as 'hell'.

In the earth realm, like the sky realm, there was quite a many different planes to enter. There was happy places, dark places, and so-so- pockets of minor doom. I told myself that I should just go for a grassy stroll, but found myself knowing that I should turn away from there.

By accident, I supposed, I found myself near the prison for uncooperative demons. It was where souls went when they caused too much trouble, or acted inconsiderate towards the established structure of right and wrong, and how much of each there ought to be in the realms.

Doesn't matter, I told myself. Because I'm going to keep on walking. I had no business in that realm, and was going my merry way on the starlight path when – barf.

Out of nowhere! I just had this wave of panic and nausea, so acute that I half sobbed and hiccuped in nausea all at the same time. Doubling over, I clapped a hand over my mouth, sure that I was about to heave something up. Panic filled me, my thoughts racing in horror, my stomach churning with dread at the idea that I might not 'find out'.

Find out what? I thought irately just before the answer came to me in the shape of a vision. A vision of Bella, smiling down at me, her hand fisted in my hair.

I walked towards the doors of the realm of nasty things. Alright, I began to admit that things were going down a little strangely. But this could be just my imagination, right? I'd investigate a little, then be gone. That would satisfy my gut, right?

"Oh hey Chaos!" said a pot-bellied gnome that could have easily been mistaken for a demon. "You here for those buggers?"

"Uh," I said, strolling up to the reception desk. There, several weird looking secretaries all nodded at me.

"We can look away as you land a punch or two," added another in jovial terms.

"That's against the regulations," said one with badly applied lipstick and fake eyelashes. "but then again," and they waved me on.

My mind reeled. I had business here? With whom? And then, as the pot-bellied one guided me forward, I realized with whom. The vampires, of course.

There was dozens in cells. Cells, cells, cells upon cells lined this part of this realm like holes in a honeycomb, stacked up and up until they seemed to drift away into darkness. As I stared, the pot-bellied gnome thumped me on the hip with a sort of good-bye pat.

"Give ya' fifteen minutes, kid! Then you gotta scram!" and he pressed a something in my hands. I looked down, shocked to see the set of keys in my hand.

"Hey-" but he was walking away.

I gulped, the moment suddenly crushing me. I had never been despised in the underworld. Certainly, they had all heard a version of what happened to me, and they all now probably thought me a hapless victim.

And now I had the keys in my hands.

For a moment, I just stood there, fear overwhelming me. What would I do? Should I really have been left alone with these keys? What if I did something stupid?

But there was no 'free them and break loose all the demons of the udnerworld!' urge. Instead, I found myself calming down. Anxiety really wasn't my thing.

With no strange urges overcoming me, I felt in control. So I strolled to the cells. I passed vampire after vampire, runnign my fingers over the iron bars. Some were curled on cots, others hunched over and clawing at their hair. Few looked up and saw me, their eyes hollow and empty. Just like I had been.

I was about to turn around and leave when I saw what I was looking for. Mister McBeefcake, who wasn't all beef and no cake anymore.

He was wasting away like the rest of them. Curled on himself, there was a plate of uneaten food in the middle of his tiny cell.

"Hey," I said, wondering who was the dummy who'd tried ot give vampires real food. Could they even digest it? "Hey?" I rapped my knuckles on the cage.

He didn't look up. Just a groan came out, then a sigh. He shifted, and I saw how sunken in his cheeks were. How he was starving.

Somehow it struck me. My beloveds, I thought, and a sense of misery rushed up through me. I had the urge to do something, anything, to help them. They were suffering!

Pressing my palms against the cell's bars, I knew there was nothing to do but I wanted to help them so badly. So much that I felt ready to cry, anxiety rising up through me in a fit that made me want to shred my own skin.

I pressed my forehead against the bars, closing my eyes. If only I could help!

Something gusted over my face. Warm air? I opened my eyes to see another pair of eyes right before mine, to feel hands closing over mine.

I startled, too late. McBurgerFace was crushing my fingers under his own, snarling so close he could almost bite me through the bars. I jerked back, but it was from the repulsive smell of his breath. Because in my mind, I was calm. This was my second in command, he would not hurt me.

"Release me," I ordered, my voice now not my own. It was so strikingly Bella's that it snapped across my mind – but I was now no longer in control of my limbs. Bella had come over me, and I hadn't even noticed it.

"My- my Queen!" crowed the vampire.

"Shh," I heard her say, saw my hand reach through the bars and caress his cheek. "You poor thing," Bella murmured through me.

Sobbing, the vampire rested his forehead against the bars. Bella drew him as close as she could, pressing my forehead against his, just like she had once done to me.

Words flowed from her and I recognized them. It was those words she had always spoken to me, and now I knew some of them, could silently follow along the first few as the feeling of love and happiness rose up within me like a pool of warm water, drownign out my thoughts.

Dimly, I heard sighs from around. Creaking of bones as limbs straightened. Rustling of cloth. I felt hundreds of eyes upon my body, watching the source of the words.

As I succumbed to the waters, so to speak, I felt more than just an ecstasy. I felt myself connected with Bella, with these creatures, could feel their thoughts and wishes and anger.

I knew right then that they all saw Bella, felt her within me.

Footsteps rung out. The creaking of the door.

My body was jerked back from the cells and suddenly I was in control of it again. I nearly fell over is what happened.

"Whoah, kid!" and the gnome was by my side as I reeled, clutching at my head and body. "What's the matter?"

No more Bella was the matter. The sense of union, the feeling of ecstasy, it was all gone and I was empty, reeling from the absence of so much. Struggling, I pulled myself together.

"Nothing," I said weakly, shaking my head and brushing the hair from my eyes.

"Hey," and the gnome looked to the cells. "They recognize you?"

Because no more were the vampires asleep and laying down. Now they were all standing at the doors, watching silently, still as statues. Their eyes gleamed like cats, throwing back the dim lights at us.

"They're awake," I mumbled, knowing with certainty that I had accomplished whatever it was that I had been sent out for.

Chapter Twelve

I reached home with a sense of accomplishment that I didn't want to acknowledge. I told myself it was nothing though I clearly knew it wasn't. I told myself that my life was about to go back to normal, and prepared to pretend like none of it had happened. Except it obviously wasn't.

"Where have you been?" asked father gently as soon as I stepped in the door.

I paused, one foot still outside in the portal-esque domain between domains. Behind father stood several large, beefy angels with their angry faces on.

"Am I in trouble?" I asked, wondering if I could outrun angels. Probably not. So I stepped fully in and shut the door behind myself.

"Of course not," said mother icily, glaring around at the angels as if to cow them into silence. But mother, the angel of life where father was the angel of death, just didn't have that power. People tended not to take her seriously, much to their later regret.

"We need to talk with you," said the heaviest of the angels, crossing his arms over his chest. "And you just so happen to have woken up. Where were you?"

I instinctively pocketed my hands in search of my dice. But no, I'd lost that in the realm of the incarnates. "I uh," I looked down at my shoes. "To tell you the truth," I shrugged. "I went to see the vampires. Okay? And then they all woke up."

The angels nodded. "So you woke up first."

Uh? I blinked, looking back up. "I guess?"

The angels watched me mercilessly. "What woke you up?"

"This isn't an interrogation!" barked mother. "He just woke up-"

"No it's okay," I mumbled. Feeling guilty? Maybe. "I just – woke up. And I had this urge to go walk, so I did. I felt better, you know? I feel – fine. I feel fine."

The angels were wearing big frowns. They looked down at me like I was a sorry little scrub. Father rattled his throat. "We should all sit down for some tea. Explain some things to Chaos."

"Yeah!" I said, suddenly bolted full of energy. "I'd like that!" And for a moment, I wasn't sure why. Then I ignored why.

The angels scowled, but loosened up. We all crowded around a living room table, the angels looking ridiculous around our family's mishmash of dainty doilies and dragon scultpures.

"So," said the biggest angel as soon as we were all seated, the kettle set on the oven. "Al sent us a message that all things weren't well while you were on mission. Then once she was shot, it was decided that you were probably being held hostage, and the rescue mission was sent – which is what happened."

My gut twisted but I tried not to let my guilt show. They had thought I was hostage? Well- was I? I propped my chin on my palm and planted my elbows on the table.

"Who was she?" asked the angel.

Again, father cleared his throat. Mother glared at the angel. I blanked. "Who?"

"The woman who shot herself. Who was holding you hostage. Who you seemed very upset about."

"Oh," I ducked my head, trying to ignore the grisly image in my head. The moment the light went out in Bella's eyes. "Uh, well she had a name but that's all I knew," I said gingerly.

"What was the name?" asked the angel impatiently.

"Bella," I mumbled, my voice croaking. "It – was after the human novel character. Twilight. You know?"

The angel nodded. Then puzzlement crossed his face. "Bella? After that character? How odd."

"I know," I mumbled. "She was really odd."

"Which pantheon?" The angel continued with his investigative drill. "We haven't heard of any demons missing from any pantheons yet."

"She wasn't a demon!" I barked suddenly.

The table hushed. The angels watched me. Oops. I slumped in my chair. Fiddled with a doily. "She had a blue eye. She must have been part sky realm, at least," I mumbled, feeling guilty. They were just trying to investigate. Just trying to pierce the mystery of Bella.

I pushed the doily away. "Uh, she liked Buddha. She," I gestured haphazardly. "Had them everywhere. Buddhas."

The angels frowned. The big one steepled his fingers before himself. "Which one? Guan yin? Amidha? This could be important clues to which pantheon-"

"How am I to know?" I snapped, temper flaring again. "It was a Buddha! They all look the fucking same!"

Again, a pause. Again, I was swamped by guilt. "I think it was 'the' Buddha." I grumbled, dropping my eyes to the table. "There was only two arms and," I imitated the gesture. "Touching the earth and hand up."

There was a lengthy pause. I didn't look up.

"And?" father said gently. "What does that tell you?"

I glanced up. The angels were all glaring at me with big frowns.

"It tells us nothing," snapped the angel in charge. "The demons Buddha defeated with that gesture were hundreds. All the demons of temptation- we can't hunt them all down!"

I twiddled with my hair. But father nodded serenely. "And?"

The angels turned their ire to him. "And now, we have a new rebellion on our hands."

"Rebellion?" I perked up.

All heads turned to me. "What rebellion?" I asked bluntly. "They're all caught- aren't they?"

"Not all," muttered the head angel fiercely. "We have most of them in their cells, waiting to detox them from whatever poison that was slipped into them – but there were humans who were contaminated."

I blanched, remembering the ecstatic séance in the church. A contamination? By what?

"Those humans are left in the incarnate realm and, as such, we cannot touch them. The military has taken them into custody and is studying them as we speak but -" the angel shrugged. "They don't seem to be holding them for long. They will release them soon, and the contamination might spread."

"Spread? What – It's a virus?" I looked around.

The angel pressed his steepled fingers together so much the tips of his fingers were white. "Spiritually, yes. These humans – and all who came into contact with this being – seem to be possessed by strange beliefs. They are praying, believing, and by doing so are warping the fabric of the spiritual world. It was nothing but a blip at first, but since her death it has grown."

Oh, shit. Because that's how things worked in the spirit realm, directly influenced by the beliefs and truths on earth.

"So if this spreads," the angel said darkly. "She will gain according power and dominion over the realms. Which could be disastrous, judging by her mental state."

I dropped my eyes to the table again. Oh crap indeed. Bella – Bella had started a new religion with herself at the center. She was not only promoting herself to deity-hood to claim certain power in the air realm, but she wanted to break into Nirvana and steal that sanctuary as well. And if she controlled the earth realm's demons... She was going to control the three spirit realms.

"If you can tell us what they believe, we may have a chance to stop her," said the angel sternly. "We need either a tactical defeat, or a public one to prove she isn't all that powerful."

Yet, I added silently. Not that powerful yet. But I shook my head. I couldn't tell them. "I wasn't awakened, they said. So they didn't tell me. But they were all very devoted to her."

"We know that," said the angel dryly. "Even you seemed quite taken by her."

I nodded miserably. "She has a charm to her."

"Must be quite the charm. She had a gun to your head and you didn't seem to care."

I didn't answer, chewing my bottom lip. Well, bugger. Bella had quite the ambition, it would seem.

"Can you tell us anything about them? Any detail about what drove them to her?" father asked gently.

I shook my head. But I spoke. "They were all really nice. I didn't think they were holding me hostage. They just asked me to visit around, then to walk with them to the portal where she pulled the gun out – I," wow, it sounded stupid when I said it like that. "They were all really nice," I repeated, defeated by those questioning glares.

"And the vampires?" asked the angel. "Did you encounter them at all?"

"It was them, they were super nice. Docile. You'd think they were tame or something."

"Drugged, more likely," declared the angel. "and the werewolves?"

"They were actually around the vampires. Co existing. It was – weird," But only now that I thought back on it. How come I hadn't noticed this as weird before? Oh yeah, I knew why. "Why hadn't you told me that there were werewolves involved?" I hated those things!

The angel shook his head. "We had no clue that they were involved, or even missing. This has taken us quite by surprise too, you must know that."

I hummed and nodded, pretending to care. Truth was, I didn't. No, I felt that somewhere in my heart, we'd become divided. I just felt I couldn't trust them, so did it matter whether they'd known about the werewolves or not? It should have, but it didn't matter to me anymore.

The angels waited, seeming to want to prod me with something else. I raised my eyebrows at them, challenging them to spit it out.

"So, you are maybe mortal now," said the angel testily.

Father stiffened. Mother's expression grew dark. And you know it's bad when the angel of life looks dark.

I guess I was supposed to squirm and look all miserable. Truth was, I couldn't care less. I had bigger fish to fry on my plate. "Okay," I said quietly, refusing to mention that I may have been given an antidote. Or maybe not. Who knew with Bella, really?

The angels tapped their fingers together, exchanging glances. Their leader seemed uncertain. "There is no antidote without knowing the original recipe, having the blood and intentions of the caster-"

"I know," I said dryly. But there was a pang in me. "What about Al?"

"Definitely mortal," said the angel without hesitation. "I'm sorry."

I looked back down at my hands, and found that I didn't care. I was just angry. Angry with the angels, angry with the humans – and confused. I wanted them gone. I wanted – Bella. I wanted to speak with her. To commune with her in that strange way again. To feel her presence and be comforted, truly.

But as all that went through my mind, there was no way to say it. So I just nodded and held my silence.

The angels seemed to have been waiting for something, again. I scowled at them. "Now what?"

They took it differently than I had intended. "Now, we have to find a way to stop this. You, it would seem, are our biggest ally. None of the vampires are telling us how they feel, or what it was that caused their strange behavior. They're even coexisting near werewolves, as you say. We need to stop this-"

"Why?" I blurted. All heads turned to me. I shrugged, pretending nonchalance. "What's so bad? So the vampires aren't hating on their lunches. Big deal."

Now the smallest of the angels spoke. "You idiot. Bella hasn't been caught yet."

There were shushes all around the table, and the sullen angel scowled around.

"Oh?" I asked, trying to sound casual and not to squirm guiltily. Like, I knew right where she was and they were all clueless.

"She vanished as she died," said Father gently. "She didn't come to me, and no one saw where she went."

Probably because I was causing such a scene, and there was all the humans around to cloud the vision and make things muddy for spirits. Like finding a person in a crowded room. But hey, all she had to do was hop right into me. It probably was easy because of the bond we shared. A special bond, I liked to think.

I fidgeted. "So?"

The head angel sighed. "Chaos, I can't tell you how dangerous she is. It is very difficult to unite the hellions. Lucifer is always struggling to keep his armies together. To disrupt this careful balance, to try and destroy the sky realms and earth realms to invade nirvana-"

"I don't think she wanted to destroy anything," I snapped coldly.

The angel continued. "You don't know what she wanted. And anyone who can turn a god mortal, and goes around doing it for the sake of fun, is a problem. Is that clear?"

I pressed my lips together, knowing full well I'd just been given a black-and-white lecture. It should have been easy to understand that Bella was 'evil' and 'dangerous'. But I just couldn't. I kept thinking of her standing beside me in the snow, our shoulders nestled together as we overlooked the gentle snowy landscape.

"Chaos?"

I shook myself, looking around the table. Had I drifted off?

"I think you need to rest," said Father gently. "Lots of rest, and to change your mind."

"Yes," said the angel chief promptly. He rose from his chair. "Lots of rest. For you, the adventure is over. Let us know if you feel any changes or sudden impulses. It could be invaluable information."

"Sure," I said lamely.

Chapter Thirteen

I needed to have a moment. Not just a breath of air to myself in this crowded spirit world, but I needed Bella. For a being that was right within me, I couldn't sense her. Yeah, sure, I was getting weird impulses as if she was me, but other than that? I felt incredibly lonely. It felt as if I was missing a limb, but inside my heart.

At first I bottled myself up within my room, hoping she would, I don't know, pop out for a chat? No such luck. I sat on my bed, at my desk, on the floor with my feet up on the wall, even tried meditating. No such fuckin' luck. Bella was silent.

Well fuck you, I thought one minute. I don't need her anyways.

The next minute I'd forgotten that thought and was pining away again. Where was my Bella?

A day passed. I found myself sitting in the kitchen, bored and staring at the wall. Both my parents were gone, busily off to their works/hobbies (they rather enjoyed their jobs). The moment was dull. I knew I should do something, get a haircut, file my nails, whatever, but just do something you know? Instead I just sat there and moped. My head ended up on the table, wrapped in my arms.

"Hey," said a voice right as something brushed my shoulder.

"AH!" I yelled, jumping so much the chair nearly toppled over (with me in it).

"Whoah," Al said, right beside me. Of course. Who else?

"Knock!" I snapped adjusting myself on the seat, humiliated.

"Oh, yeah," she looked away. My anger vanished. She looked defeated. There was no bright gleam to her eyes. No pazazz to her punch, if you know what I mean. She was even slouching. Dead already uh?

I cleared my throat. Nodded to the chair beside me. "How are you?"

"I've heard you're doing all good now," she said before dropping into the chair. Then, much like me, she propped herself on an elbow. I slouched.

"Guess so," I mumbled.

"So uh," she looked at me. I looked away, but her words chased me. "What happened?"

I knew what she meant, really. Al was no idiot. We'd known each other for years and years and years. She must know that for me to cry over Bella was no... nothing?

But I fibbed. "I liked her." No, I loved her. Big difference, but I wasn't going to tell anyone that.

Al nodded. "Yeah, I could see that."

But she wasn't even there? She must have heard about it enough to picture it though.

"That's all, really," I fibbed.

"Were you dating?" Al asked dryly.

I dropped my head down. Ran a hand through my hair. The silence spoke for itself.

"Huh," said Al. "So what, we're seeing people now?"

"I'm sorry," I said quietly. But Al and me had never felt like a 'we'. We'd never really been anything more than friends that people had a lot of expectations for. It had been nothing like with Bella. There just wasn't that intimacy.

Al grunted. I stared down at the table, unable to speak from the guilt choking me. Well, was I guilty? What for? I was happy with Bella – and that should not be a crime.

I perked up. "I was happy," I blurted, trying to put my thoughts into words. "And I want you to be happy."

Al just looked tired. Tired of my crap? "Really?" she asked.

I nodded. "Date people, just- we don't have eternity, you and me. So why be miserable? Go and fall in love."

She smiled wryly. "Excuse me if I don't take dating advice from the guy whose girlfriend tried to shoot him."

Ouch. "She didn't try," I muttered.

"She had a gun to your head," Al snapped. "That kind of disqualifies your relationship as happy and fulfilling."

I scowled and crossed my arms. Al gaped. "Seriously? You're going to defend her?"

Self righteousness stiffened me. "She would never hurt me." But I stopped my defense, because Al was laughing.

"You're so screwed!" She said while laughing a sad, sad, laugh at me. Like she really pitied me. "You're lucky Chaos. You're lucky she's gone. She could have done so much worse to you."

Pressing my lips together, I looked down at the table, then at my lap. I wasn't really seeing anything though, my thoughts roaring in my head that Bella was here, right here, and she could probably hear everything and -

"What happened between you two?" asked Al. "Why her?"

Because she wanted me? Because she put a part of herself into me and now there's no going back? But I just shrugged. There was no explaining it. How could you explain the strange feelings she made rise within me, the way I knew she loved me? And then there was the time in the snowy field, where it wasn't so extreme but I just knew we were happy together.

"Hey," Al's voice was softer. "If we're friends, you can talk to me you know."

"But I don't want to," I blurted. Then, seeing the hurt on Al's face, I tried to catch myself. "I don't want to talk to anyone, really. I just- it hurts okay?"

Al nodded. She must know what hurt means.

"So," I tried to change conversation topic, but she again took the wheel.

"So I'll be dating people then," she said staunchly, as if daring me to argue. I nodded. She glared at me. "You get the fun part of telling our parents that it's over."

I flinched. "Why don't we each tell our own?" I wasn't 'scared' of the Thunderbird. More like, embarrassed? I didn't want to show my face before him, nevermind tell him that after I screwed everything up royally, I was dumping his daughter → after we've been engaged since babyhood.

Al laughed dryly. "Nice try. But you're the one who broke it, so you tell everyone, and you tell them why."

I felt a surge of anger. "I told you because you're my friend! I'm not going to tell everyone!" About me and Bella. That was private. Special. Secret.

"They're not idiots Chaos!" she snapped back. "You tell them, or I will, and you don't want me doing that!"

True. I thumped back against my chair, letting out a breath. I tried to relax, but I was just angry. I didn't want to do that. I wanted to run.

"Tomorrow," Al declared, rising to her feet. "You come and tell them." She shoved her chair in. "And you don't leave anything out."

I glared at her, but she marched away. Bang, the door was shut behind her. I cursed and kicked my feet at the floor, but it was useless. I was angry, screwed, and Bella wasn't here to comfort me or give me advice. I missed her, I missed ...

I blanched as I realized what exactly I missed from her. I missed feeling like she was in control of me.

Alright. I was cool, I was calm, I was completely in charge. I just felt like I was freaking out, but that was a feeling, not a reality. I felt ready for a meltdown, but that was NOT going to happen. I was in control.

I breathed deeply through the nose, then let it out. Okay. Calm.

Thumping my head down onto the table, I knew I was anything but. I'd always prided myself on being an independent and self-powerful and determined person. Now I missed Bella – because she'd told me what to do? What kind of sap was I? I never needed anyone!

With a groan I told myself that I was being an idiot. A weak, spineless, gutless, flop. Who needed someone to tell them what to do? A weak person, that's who.

I clawed at my hair. That's it! I rose to my feet, full of a decision. I was going to get rid of Bella. The angels were right → this was a virus! She, Bella, must have infected me with something! Something that was eating away at who I was, something that was changing me in my vital essence.

I turned, and yelped, jumping almost out of my skin. Because right there, right before my nose, was Bella.

"Missed me?" she cooed, strange smile ever in place. Like she was daring me to say otherwise.

My jaw hung open. A mirage, the back of my head told me. Just a flimsy outcropping from the part of her that's hiding within you. Not really fully there.

If ever there was a chance at me battling, taking down Bella, here it was. This was just a piece of her, after all.

Instead I felt my knees buckling as her finger pointed me down, like we were linked through a string of communication and obedience. I barely registered the cold of the floor's tiles beneath my knees. My heart was pounding, my eyes captivated by the vision before me.

A finger caressed my cheek. "Good," she crooned, leaning over me. The studs and buckles on her clothing glinted in the light, her smile eerie. There was no scent to her as she came to a stop directly above my face, proof that she wasn't fully there. "I'm no virus, Chaos," she whispered. Her touch trailed to the back of my hair and I shuddered in pleasure as it gripped in my hair, tugging just the right amount. "But you promised yourself to me. And I don't take that lightly."

Butterflies were filling my stomach. I felt euphoric and couldn't blame her for that. I was so happy, but the back of my mind was screaming in fury. How could she do this to me? How indeed, except for the fact that I wanted this, needed this on a carnal level?

"Indeed," she whispered before kissing me gently. It was chaste, short, and left me hoping for more. But then she let go of my hair and stepped back. I was free, but only in a simplistic way. Truly, her sepll was still over me.

Her smile turned wicked as she looked me over. My heart thudded in my throat and I hoped vainly that she liked what she saw.

If she'd heard my thought, she didn't comment on it. "You're going to go to earth and find my body," she said, eyes lingering over my chest.

She stepped back to me. My heart skipped a beat and I craned my neck to look up at her. I felt flushed and bare from how much she was staring at me. She stooped again, reaching for my necklaces this time. With a twist of her wrist she wound the necklaces around her fist, tightening them around my throat. "No more of this backing out or being silly. You obey me."

I caught myself nodding, hoping for a kiss. For maybe a little more.

She chuckled, drawing me from my foolish thoughts. The necklaces thudded against my chest as she let go, and she pushed my head down into a bow. The touch lifted from my head, and I saw that her boots were gone. I looked around, and she had vanished.

For a moment the happiness and elation continued. Bella had been here! To see me!

Then, like a cold deluge, the realization settled in. I was sunk. I was a failure. Either the virus was in full swing, or the part of me that loved Bella was... submissive.

I hugged myself, digging my nails painfully into my arms. What the hell?!, I asked myself. You're better than this! Get help! Be sensible!

Squeezing my eyes shut, I knew all that. But I felt, I felt, that I could not betray her. I loved her. Deep down, as I breathed and calmed myself, I became resigned to my fate. A fate by her side, on my knees.

Yes, it was becoming clearer as I relaxed. Some spirits dedicated themselves to causes and capacities, others to the causes of larger spirits. I would be one of those. I would dedicate myself to Bella.

It wasn't from a lack of choice, I realized as I stood to my wobbly feet. It was just that, a choice, and my head knew I was making the wrong one, but it felt so right in my core. Bella had taken hold of my heartstrings and I just couldn't turn her away. It would gut me.

I squashed down my emotions, becoming cold and calculating in my choice. I could do this, I knew. I would help Bella.

I fetched my weapons, grabbed a snack, and shrugged on my checkered jacket that had once belonged to Mike but was certainly mine now.

And off I went, ignoring the gaping pit that was opening up within me. At least, I told myself, if I followed Bella I might not have to face the Thunderbird tomorrow.

Chapter Fourteen

I made it two steps out into the world between worlds before I thought I was an idiot. A goof. A slug who was throwing their life away.

The fact that, any moment now, I could just turn around and get help, it was a nagging ache. Worse, every second that I ignored the ache cemented that I was never going back. I had made my choice and, deep within, it was holding fast.

I liked to contemplate that I would change my mind. I kept telling myself that, at the next crossroads, or after the portal, or when I saw Bella's body, I'd rethink things, all while knowing that I would do no such thing.

To get to earth, I needed a portal. Like many spirits, I had no means to make one myself, hardly being that powerful, and indeed, not having permission to do so myself. But, like anything, it could be found in hell for a price. You just had to know where to look. And I, being me, just so happened to know that the very best place to look was where it wasn't supposed to be.

"Hey," I said as I approached Lucifer's throne. Because, yeah, the guy who was supposed to keep this place in line was also the one who sold everything to keep it out of line.

Lucifer, at least this representation/part of him (who knew if it was just a part of himself while the rest of his soul went off doing something stupid?), was draped across his throne. In hues of black and silver, he shimmered like starlight, his silver hair hanging around him like curtains. His face was decorated with a veil-like array of fine chains that dangled from piercings. Bright blue eyes shone out, tokens of his once angel-hood.

He tutted at me. "Darling, I've heard you weren't well. Come here and tell me all about it." And he reached out a lanky arm. I knew better than to say no. Lucifer was huggy, if anything just to give people the creeps by touching them constantly. It was especially hard to navigate someone who wanted to hug you persistently.

So I sat beside his throne, the usual place a supplicant found themselves, and his arm draped around my shoulders. Instantly it was like a hissing cat roused within me.

"Mine," I clearly heard within my head as an itching sort of anger swept over me.

"Uh," I jumped up, swiping Lucifer's arm from me as fast as I could.

"Oh?" Lucifer asked casually. I froze. Was there some sort of punishment for spiting Lucifer? There was a certain glimmer to his eyes – was he angry now?

"Aww, I see," Lucifer crooned. With a stretch he took a grip on my shoulder and dragged me to stand before him. Distracted by his glittering eyes, I didn't see his leg sweep out as he straightened. My feet were kicked out from beneath me and I landed on the stone floor on my knees.

Yeah, ouch.

"Well hello," Lucifer said, propping a foot up on my shoulder. I winced as his heel dug in, but then he added the weight of his other leg to it.

"I'm sorry," I croaked.

"You should be!" he said happily. "Lying to angels like that. Tut-tut, Chaos. You know they're looking all over for your little girlfriend?"

Inside, I felt a strange coolness. Bella was furious, but calm. She knew how to play this game it would seem.

But me? I wanted to protect her. So I opened my mouth, about to spout something about not knowing what he was talking about.

"Oh no, spare me that," said Lucifer, holding up a hand dramatically. "I don't want to talk with you. Summon your mistress."

My jaw clamped shut. Humiliation spread over me and I gritted my teeth angrily. How dared he talk to me like that? He wasn't the boss of me! "You-"

But I was cut off from within. Suddenly I felt myself callously shunted aside, crashing into a corner of myself. My limbs were moving but I had no control over them.

My hands shoved Lucifer's feet from my shoulder. "Good morning," Bella's voice said coldly.

"Oh hey, doll!" Lucifer grinned, crossing one leg over the other knee. "I hope you don't mind, I was using your footstool."

Footstool? I wanted to squawk in horror. Bella didn't seem to care. She was on her (mine?) feet now and dusting herself off. "I need a portal," she was saying through me. "Chaos is going to fetch my body on earth."

Lucifer tutted. "Darling, everyone's been looking for you. You know, I could make a lot of money if I told them where you are."

Bella snorted. "As if you will. Give me a portal."

"You know, I want a personal slave too," Lucifer whined. He held up a hand, pretending to investigate his manicured fingernails.

"Lucifer!" Bella barked. Then, as he raised his eyebrows, she checked herself. "Lucifer," she said politely. "I really need a portal."

Lucifer waved his fingers at himself, making his rings glimmer. Bella continued. "I can pay you," she said sweetly. I could feel her smile on my face.

"Of course you're going to pay me," drawled Lucifer. "But in what?"

Bella hesitated. "I can bring you some souls?" she offered.

Lucifer dropped his hand into his lap. "I like it when payment benefits everyone. Darling, you want to rule the three realms? Isn't that it?"

"I want Nirvana," Bella said cautiously. "Only one of the realms."

"Only the strongest," drawled Lucifer with a drag Queen-esque flip of the hand. "Now listen to me, chickling. I'll give you a portal, and you will go get your body back, but you have to challenge God to a duel afterwards. It's time someone dethrones the old fart."

Bella hesitated.

"A duel, that's all," said Lucifer. "and as the prize, you'll wager the rulership of the sky realm. Don't you think it'll be a lot easier to get into Nirvana if you can wage war against it with the power of the hordes of angels and demons, instead of your little piddly vampire-army? Hmm, girl?"

Bella hesitated again. I knew why. Lucifer was one to give gifts – at a price. "What do you want in return?" she asked cautiously.

"Oh, you know, I really just want to see that old deity crushed under someone's heel," he said viciously, bringing his fingers to his lip. "But, ah, for payment – hmmm we shall see."

"We shall see?" Bella asked sharply. "I don't think so."

Lucifer flipped out a hand. In his palm, a miniature portal hovered, glowing a dark purple. "You don't want a portal, darling?"

Bella gulped. Lucifer's fingers waved around the portal. "I'll make sure the angels look away as your slave travels," he cooed.

Don't do it! I thought as loudly as I could.

Bella hesitated.

Lucifer pouted. "Of course, if you don't want it, I'll have to respect my agreements to the ruling heavens and bla bla bla, you know how divine paperwork is, and," he shrugged "I'll have to turn you and your slave in to the angels."

Bella grimaced.

Lucifer tilted his head. "As a great leader once said," and he paused for dramatic effect, making a pitiable face "'Sad'."

Bella scowled. "Fine!" she reached forward. "Give me the portal!"

"Ecx-el-lent!" Lucifer cheered, dropping the portal into my palm. It was heavy but Bella's strength allowed me to hold it. "There you go darling. Use it well!" Now grinning most viciously, he kicked his legs up onto his armrest and returned to draping across his throne.

Bella smiled nastily in return. I felt her sarcasm, but at the same time her glee. With Lucifer officially on her side, she was one step closer to Nirvana.

Bella continued her grip over me until we had transported to the mortal plane. There, I finally was in control of my body. It didn't come with a warning, or a gentle 'here you go'. No, one moment Bella was striding forward, then the next I was crumbling down, waving my arms and flailing my legs to try and catch myself. Needless to say, I landed face-first in a snowdrift, gracelessly.

Pfah! I spat snow and scrubbed the freezing stuff off my face, propping up on one hand and scrambling up to my knees.

Inside, I felt Bella laughing at me. Thanks, but no thanks, I thought bitterly. "You can't just do that!" I muttered viciously, just to be sure she heard that thought.

She must have heard me, but there was no answer. Perhaps she was tired from the stint of taking control over me? Now on my feet, I began trudging forward.

The portal had transported us into a scenery that looked dangerously familiar. There was quaint farmhouses. Lots of snow. Fields and valleys. And there, on the horizon? Pine trees of doom. Ugh.

I trudged and trudged and trudged. My feet were freezing and I was muttering angrily under my breath, wondering why the hell Bella hadn't transported me closer to civilization. Why? And why did I have to do all the legwork, literally? Huh? She could walk and feel the freezy bits too!

No sooner had I thought that than I heard the sound of skidoos on the horizon. Great! I looked left, right, and saw them approaching from both directions. What luck!

It took me all of two seconds to realize that this was no luck. The humans must have sensed the portal somehow (what? Since when did they have that technology/spider senses?) and those skidoos were aiming straight for me.

So I stood still and let them come to me. Nope, I was not spending one iota more energy than I had to. No A+ for effort. I just stood, feet freezing, hands stuffed into my pockets for warmth, my breath freezing into misty clouds before me.

Finally, the skidoos (there was more than two, in fact they had been two flocks of five) drew up. Their riders fanned out, drawing guns that I recognized.

"Freeze!" one of them barked.

I laughed, hands still in my pockets. The irony was not lost on me. Freeze? Did it look like I was doing anything else in this stupid weather?

Laughter done and over with, I drew my hands slowly from my pockets and held them up at my sides. "Look, all I want is to talk," I said flatly.

There was a beep. "Target recognized! Set to stun!" one of them barked.

"Hey wait-"

Thud thud thud, I was stabbed by about a dozen feathered needles ramming into my chest. "Fuck," I groaned, hoping it wasn't possible to overdose on this junk.

Then, the world swam and toppled over.

I woke up in a situation that was an echo. I was strapped down, and Leo was at my side in a lab coat. FoxFace was beside him, grinning wildly.

"What an excellent situation!" she was saying as I blinked awake.

"Oh," Leo pointed at me. "Awake." And he waved his fingers over my face. "Hey there!"

My first reaction was to snatch at those dumb fingers. What did he think I was? A baby? But I was strapped down, right? I just snapped against the straps, painfully.

"Good, awake," said Leo, scribbling on an electronic pad.

"Hi there kiddo," said FoxFace, leaning over me with a wicked grin.

I scowled and twisted my head away from her. Ugh. "What the hell?" I demanded. "Untie me!"

"Oh no," she said, obviously enjoying herself. "We're going to do this right here, like this. What brings you here?"

I glared at her, then skipped my eyes over to Leo. "What are you doing here?" Poor guy, he'd tried so hard to escape. But then again... my pity evaporated at the sight of his huge grin.

"Safely back at work, thank you very much," he said pleasantly. Too pleasantly. Wasn't he supposed to be miserable? What, had they tortured him into happiness? I frowned, puzzled.

FoxFace chuckled, patting Leo on the shoulder. "Our Sergeant here is perfectly well, don't you worry. But you-" she pried at me with an eyebrow. "Tell us more."

I snarled silently, lip curling in distaste. But what could I say? "I would like to talk to Leo alone."

"Not happening!" said Foxface cheerfully. She snapped up a syringe from a table and waved it around like a drag queen would a shoe, a very dangerous shoe. "I believe you've been introduced to the dangers of needles, right kid?"

My scowl stayed firmly in place.

She grinned like this was one of those moments in life that she lived for. "Air in needles? All bad news for you, so," she stretched out the syringe so that it was absolutely full of air. "Want to talk? Or am I sending you on a hot trip home?"

Cursing silently, I looked around. Nope, no rescue team coming in to help me. I hadn't told anyone I was leaving, and so really, no backup.

"Okay, look!" I barked at her. "I just want to see her body! That's it."

Foxface made an unimpressed face. "Which part?" she asked, nonplussed. Then, setting the needle down she added "And what for?"

I pressed my lips together. Think, think, think. The best lie is one that contains the truth so → "Her soul is missing," I blurted. "We think it might be lingering around her body."

"Really?" asked Foxface. Turning to Leo she asked "Any electromagnetic activity recorded around the body?"

"None whatsoever," said Leo happily as he checked something off his tablet. My, he looked so happy.

"Lookit," I blurted. "Just a bone. Give me a bone."

"A bone?" Foxface's eyes lit up. "Whatever for?"

I floundered. I wasn't sure why I wanted a bone, actually. "Uh, uhm, I uh-"

Foxface smiled like a cheshire cat. I shrugged. "A bone. Please. If you give me a bone, I'll tell you something else." Like what, genius? The color of Lucifer's underwear?

"Oh no, no no no, you tell us what the bone is for, then we'll see what we do from there."

I bit my lip. This wasn't going so well.

I half-invented some more. "The bone is for burial. To summon her. You know."

FoxFace peered closer at me. "Really?"

I nodded. "Oh yeah."

She did not look convinced. "And why should we give it to you?"

I tried to shrug. Nonchalance, nonchalance. "Because," I said slowly, hoping something smart would just fall out of my mouth. No such thing did. I just waited on myself, and nothing came. Foxface raised her eyebrows.

"Because?" She looked like she was trying not to laugh at me.

I sighed. "Look, do you want Bella lurking around or do you want to give her to me? Consider your choices." I thought it was maybe a good deal. Foxface obviously did not.

She laughed, peals of laughter just coming out of her. Even Leo looked amused.

"What?" I snarked, but I had the nasty feeling that yeah, I looked dumb. That was humiliating. That didn't sit well with me – but it wasn't sitting well with Bella either.

I felt it like a hard coil within me that was expanding, rage taking more and more space. Then, like a cold voice within, complete with a memory of Bella's angry smile, I heard her voice.

"Free yourself, and wreck this place. Teach them a lesson."

The order was like a cool salve. I felt awake, but subdued. Alert, but calm. Her grip over me was palpable, but it was comforting.

"What?" asked Foxface.

"Nothing," I lied.

"You look different," she said, drawing out a tool that looked like card reader. She handed it to Leo who pointed it at me. There was a loud beeping sound and their eyebrows rose. "Fluctuating levels," Leo mumbled.

"Do it." Bella ordered within me. "Now. Free yourself."

Abruptly I realized that my failure was a humiliation to her. I must succeed, for her.

I had no weapons on me, no more necklaces. I was dressed, but my jacket was piled on a nearby chair. Closing my eyes, I felt my power. I felt Bella. And through her, the power she had granted me.

I felt myself speaking, but the words were silent. I felt myself slipping into that strange state that only Bella brought on. The ecstasy was near, like I was skating on the edge of a cliff.

There was a shout. Still reciting, I opened my eyes. I could hardly see through the haze of my mind, through the drifting closer to the universal truths, but there was Leo, clutching his head. There was a dazed and shocked look about him. FoxFace was gripping his shoulders and shakign him. Then, she whirled to snatch up a needle.

Why wasn't she affected?, flicked through my mind before I realized what she was going to do. Subdue me. Another needle was in her hand.

Free me! I ordered Leo, channeling the words with will at him.

In a lurch Leo did. He flung himself between FoxFace and I, smashing down a button. All bonds jumped free. I scrambled up in a smooth glide, feeling like I was Bella's puppet just as much as Leo was mine and we were all connected through a string that tied back to Bella. It was oddly satisfying, feeling Bella's grip over me. I felt so much more powerful.

But there wasn't time to dwell on it. I darted around the table, retrieving my swords and necklaces. FoxFace was gawking, stepping back with a gun in hand. My weapons slashed out. The closest machine exploded in a shower of sparks. Leo hung limply on the place, awaiting my next orders as I rounded on them.

"Now trash this place," Bella's will forged through me, demanding results.

And trash that place I did. FoxFace had pressed an emergency button but I was on fire. My power was rippling out through me. I moved like water over oil, letting out a wave of magic that exploded, burning and destroying as it went. Leo alone I spared, willing him to survive it.

As smoke filled the room a door hissed open and soldiers rushed in. Feathered needles flew towards me. I dodged, and cut the soldiers down one by one. Mercilessly I hacked my way forward, my vision a red blurr as I moved on and on.

I didn't know where I was going, but I knew where I was when I found it. Bella's body was there, in pieces, about this room. In a haze, I knew what to do. Collect the pieces. Injest them.

I smashed the jars down, kicked open drawers, and laid it all in a mess on the floor. Soldiers would be coming soon, I felt them streaming down the hallway, but this was primordial. This was it.

Within moments the room was a mangled mess, bloody bits strewn here and there, and I was drenched in a haze of magic, drunk on it. I didn't know what I was doing or I would have been repulsed by the room and this gory mess.

Instead I felt Bella through me, in me, unifying through me. Her voice through mine, her heart beating in time with me. Power drove through me in near orgasmic waves. I couldn't think, was only a puppet that was repeating, doing.

Then, abruptly, I collapsed into darkness. I found myself on all fours in smears of blood and shards of glass, mind reeling from the absence of magic, the void of Bella within me.

I did see the gun hovering before my face though. Beyond, I saw FoxFace, furious.

Then the world turned black.
Chapter Fifteen

When I came to, I was tied to a chair. FoxFace was before me, arms crossed and a very sour look on her face. I felt groggy and sluggish.

"Feeling better?" FoxFace asked sharply, marching over to my side.

I eyed her, unable to really move my head. I was exhausted. But still, she irritated me. "No," I mumbled. "Can I have some painkillers?"

Crack! She punched me across the face. Hard! It stung! My head snapped to the side and pain split across the side of my head.

"Really?" she asked sharply. "Does that feel better?"

I spluttered, head hanging back down. I blinked but couldn't shake the pain. "No," my voice cracked. My lips were dry.

"Listen to me, you little shit," she snapped, hauling my head up by my hair. It hurt! But I was too limp to do anything about it.

For a blissful moment I almost laughed, knowing that Bella wouldn't like me being treated in such a way. She was possessive, she would react and punish.

But she didn't. Instead of a surge of possessive anger I felt an emptiness within myself. No more Bella.

Like a whipcrack it struck me. Bella was gone. She'd left me.

FoxFace was saying something, but I wasn't hearing her. "Where's Bella?" I blurted, completely interrupting her.

"What do you mean?" she snapped. I managed to focus on her burning eyes.

"Bella," I spluttered. "Where is she?" I felt near tears. She'd abandoned me?

No smile from FoxFace. "Not here," she snapped. "What, did you expect to find her?"

I searched her face, hoping to see some clue, something that I was missing. What had happened? I'd found the bones. I'd let Bella use me, send her magic out. She should have returned. We should be together right now. Unless... no, she wouldn't. She cared about me. She wouldn't just leave me behind.

Not like this.

I was snapped to by FoxFace glaring at me – and talking. It was more the tone of her voice, honestly. It was somehow sympathetic. "You found Bella. Don't you remember what you did?"

I felt like crying. Blinking rapidly, I cast my eyes around, not really noticing what I was looking at. Anywhere but at FoxFace.

"What happened?" asked FoxFace staunchly.

I gulped. Where was Bella? She mustn't have just abandoned me without a reason. There must have been a reason.

Shaking my head, I tried to sort my thoughts out. Focus on the now. FoxFace was standing before me, hands on her hips.

I collected myself somewhat. "I don't remember," I fibbed. "I just sort of – something happened. When Leo was talking and -" something clicked in my mind. "Why are you still alive?"

"What makes you think I should be dead?" she asked wryly. "If you don't remember anything, that is."

I balked. Stupid, stupid, me.

FoxFace smiled wryly. "If you'd stop lying, don't you think this could go easier?"

"Really?" I snapped. "You think life gets better with honesty?" It sure as hell didn't! I'd heard enough life stories to-

"No," FoxFace said calmly. "I think it gets easier if you know when to make friends and when to make enemies."

I paused. "You're not my friend."

She stooped to look me square in the eye. "I'm not your enemy, either. Don't make one of me."

"You're not?" I sneered. "I seem to remember things differently."

FoxFace grinned slyly. "Really?" She smirked. "If I were you, I'd rethink that statement, Chaos. You don't want to be my enemy. Now-"

I spat in her face. On second thought, not the smartest thing to do, considering I was cuffed to the chair and still in head-splitting pain from the last punch.

FoxFace wiped her face on her sleeve. There was a rabid look to her eyes now, and I expected another punch. Instead she was just grinning. "Alright," she hummed. "That's the way this is. Well, that leaves me a clear conscience."

"For what?" I snapped, all bravado and secretly wondering what the hell she had up her sleeve.

But, grin still in place, she didn't answer. "Sweet dreams, Chaos," was all she said as she produced another syringe from a nearby table.

"Hey! What's that?" I fairly yelled, trying to shimmy away from the thing. It was pointless, as she poked it in me without second thought. When she drew it out, empty, my arm was tingling.

FoxFace waved at me. "Bye, bye," she said way too happily.

Then the world grew dark. But in this darkness was pain, incredible pain. I had the distinct feeling that I was dissolving, being torn apart, and that I was traveling. Returning to the astral plane – yet I didn't want to go there. Desperately, I wanted Bella. I knew I had to find her, help her, and be by her side.

I woke in a field of snow, crashing into it and the icy cold on my hands and face like a harsh bite. I floundered, struggling to my feet, blinded by light and stinging all over in residual pain as I felt myself finish putting itself back together.

For a moment all I did was flail and try to stay standing in the knee- deep snow. Then, as the pain oozed away and my eyes adjusted – I saw that I was standing exactly where Bella and I had once stood together. The view here was beautiful. The rolling fields, the farmhouses – it was all still as it had once been.

A gaping ache opened up like a wound within me. I wanted Bella like an addict wanted their fix – and for a split second I wondered whether I really wanted her, or whether it was that strange sensation of being with her that I wanted. Was it the euphoria, or love?

I shook my head, dismissing that as stupid. At this point, I figured it was probably a bit of both. No – a lot of both. I really needed Bella, and I really -

"Chaos?" a sweet voice said from beside me. I whirled, and there she was, like a mirage.

"Bella?" I grabbed her with both hands, seizing her by the shoulders. She was real! She was solid! I flung my arms around her, squeezing her in the tightest hug I could manage. She was laughing.

"Chaos? How did you get here? What are you doing?" And she pushed back, forcing me a step away from her. I didn't care, I was filling up with her presence, feelign a strange euphoria at her presence. I just wanted to sink to my knees in the snow, as if it was the only right thing I could do in her presence.

I found myself babbling as this went through my mind. I was pawing at her hands that held me at arms' length. "I was looking for you – they captured me – you were gone – and now you're here - ,"

Bella chuckled. "You're my absolute best," she murmured, and I felt like she meant it, meant every word and meaning of it. My heart felt like it was going to explode from joy.

She finally drew me in for a slow, purposeful kiss. I wanted to cry from relief. The feel of her was a balm to my wounds – and then she drew back.

"Come with me," she said sternly. "We can't stay here, the humans have control of this area."

"They do?" I asked, mind flubbering around. Of course, they had invaded. Bella had no more land – or did she?

Bella dissolved away before my eyes, her grip still firmly on my arms. When her hands went to dissolve, I began to follow.

This traveling was painless, easy, and fluid. One minute we were in the bitter snow, the next we were slowly reappearing in Bella's living room. The same one as before, with several vampires still in it.

"I went to investigate the portal," Bella was drawling as I finished taking full form. "And look who I found."

There was a murmur of approval from the vampires. A glimmer of jealousy? They didn't seem fully pleased to see me.

But Bella either didn't care or didn't notice. Within moments I was seated in someone else's spot and Bella had resumed her chair. Swiftly, I was given the summary of the situation. The vampires had retained power over the city, and only the city. The humans who lived within were the reason why – the rest of Canada wasn't sure how to control a raving bunch of awe-inspired people who insisted Bella was their god and wanted to be left alone. For now, they were being starved out in the dead of winter. The humans, in their devotion to Bella, were simply staying put and starving.

"There are many who have been taken into captivity. Those who lived outside of the city," said one vampire angrily. "We must rescue them." And due to the emotion in her voice – did she actually care about these humans? "They are our brothers and sisters!" she said dramatically.

"Yes, yes, all in due time," muttered Bella, eyes staring off into the distance beyond everyone.

The vampires did not seem pleased. "There are many more who have been made captives in the earth realm, taken away," grumbled another vampire. "We must rescue them as well."

A smile lit up Bella's face. "I think I know what we're going to do next," she said with the cheer of someone on a bright new idea.

"But the rescue missions?" whimpered the vampire who was so emotional about it all.

Bella waved her hand in dismissal. "I'm going to challenge the sky god to a duel."

My jaw fell. She said it so lightly, so easily – but did she know what she was doing?

Chapter Sixteen

I waited until Bella and I were alone in her bedroom to defy her.

"You can't do that," I pleaded with her, conscious that I was treading delicate ground in challenging her.

"What?" she asked, glancing over her shoulder at me. She had her back to me and was busy with something on her nighttable. I laid my jacket on the bed, making sure to choose my words carefully. I didn't want her to be angry with me.

"Challenge the sky god. It's like challenging Lucifer," Except worse, because the sky god was the one who won in that battle of the gods, remember? "You can't do that. You'll get hurt."

Bella turned around with a smirk, placing something behind her back. Her blue eye twinkled. "Don't worry about me Chaos," she said sweetly. "We have something else to discuss."

I worried at my bottom lip. "But-"

Bella gave me a scowl, and that silenced me. As my jaw shut, her good mood returned. She drew her hands out from behind her back. "Come here," she ordered.

Jaw slightly agape, I stepped forward. For in her hands, she had a beautiful black collar. At least, to my eyes it was beautiful. There was studs along the side, and a vial was set at the front instead of a gem. A vial of what looked like blood.

"On your knees," she murmured as I stepped before her.

Entranced, I didn't think twice. I sunk to my knees. My eyes were riveted on the collar, then up to her face where she was smirking contently.

"You're my best," she crooned. "And," she drew my hair aside with one hand. The smooth texture of the collar met the skin of my neck and goosebumps raised along my arms. I just knew that it was her blood in that little vial. "You're mine," she whispered as she buckled it around my neck.

My heart was doing somersaults. I was going to explode from happiness, from pure joy.

"You're my perfect slave," she crooned, stooping before me. In her other hand now, unwrapping from around her wrist, was a slim leash. She clipped it to a buckle beneath the vial. I couldn't have been happier.

"I love you," she whispered so close to my lips, but I didn't dare reach for her, knowing perfectly well that that was her call to make.

Then, with a sharp tug at my neck that was more of a yank, she dragged me to the bed.

That night was a piece of fantasy. I was not undressed one bit, and yet I was brought to sheer ecstasy via Bella's sweetly magical words and the works of her hands. I was tied in knots, bound and barely able to breathe around a gag that was stuffed into me. It was euphoric. Worse, I sensed something in me change as she commanded and I obeyed. Something in me shifted or gave way. It just seemed so natural to obey, so proper for my place to be at her feet that I would have licked her boots clean without second thought that night. It was blindingly satisfying. It just felt so good.

The next morning I was subdued, gleeful, and still euphoric. I woke to find Bella already awake, lying at my side with a bright smile on.

"Good morning," she whispered. The leash was still wrapped around her hand, tethering us together. She tugged on it harshly. "Come here."

I obeyed gleefully. Anything she wanted, anything for her. I straddled her as she patted her hips, nuzzled her neck and kissed her carefully. Her fingers wound in my hair, pulling painfully then massaging in turns. My heart fluttered at the attention. When she lifted my chin away from hers I was giddy. Butterflies were filling me and I wanted nothing more than to be commanded.

But Bella's mind seemed to be elsewhere as she stroked my cheeks. "Today is going to be a big day Chaos," she whispered soberly. "I need you to be perfect today. You must do exactly what I say. Obey me without question." She paused, a gleam in her eyes. Her usual smile flickered back to life. "Will you do that for me?"

"Of course," I gushed, because really, anything. She could ask for anything.

Her fingers gripped my hair tightly. The leash drew taught in the other direction, holding me painfully suspended between the two. "Good," she murmured, dragging my head back to kiss my neck. The leash loosened and her other hand caressed my side – then dug its nails into my ribs. I whimpered at the pain, relishing in it because it was from Bella.

A messenger was sent ahead, a vampire who was to bear the challenge to the Sky Lord. The lord of lords. The thought of Bella fighting him made me anxious. She did know what she was getting into, right? She must have, I said to comfort myself, because look at her. She's smiling.

But then again, Bella always smiled.

I gnawed at my nails and told myself that certainly, even if she lost, she wouldn't be harmed. She would ... be put in jail? Probably. But I could help her escape from there if worse came.

It was afternoon on earth when we finally took the portal. It was Bella, her hench-crew of vampire sidekicks, and me. I stayed by Bella's side.

The portal brought us straight to the arena where the fight was going to go down.

It was like the Colosseum – or rather the Colosseum was like it. It was huge, circular, with walls that rose seemingly into the sky. So maybe it was Colosseum meets tower of babel? Anyways, there was plenty of room for everyone to watch the humiliation of whoever was defeated.

The stands were filled with angels and even demons and deities of all kinds. Lucifer was standing in the middle of the arena, talking to the Sky Lord. At our appearance Lucifer waved us over.

"Dar-ling! What a surprise you've brought us!" cooed Lucifer, sauntering over to meet us halfway. He was glittering in black with silver stars all over and the highest heels anyone could manage. He tossed his hair dramatically over his shoulder and it slapped the approaching Sky lord in the face.

The Sky Lord was, well, awkward. You could get as much from a guy that lived off a mountain, alone, and never wanted anything to do with other deities. He stood stiff, wore ancient clothing, and wore a beard as if he was the most ancient of all (he wasn't).

But running in from the sidelines, like goalies rushing to a fight? My mom and dad. I glanced away, but boom! They appeared over in a puff of smoke.

"Chaos!" they said together, both sounding near tears.

Bella lay a hand on my shoulder. There was a moment of silence. I looked from the Sky Lord to Lucifer to – yeah they were pissed. Back to Lucifer it was.

"Chaos is my champion," said Bella sweetly. "He's going to be fighting for me today."

The words went in one ear and out the other. It was the collective gasps that alerted me to the importance of what had been said. That, and the laughter of Lucifer.

"Pre-cious!" he cheered with a flip of the hand, like he was announcing the winner of some fashion competition.

"But!" Mother looked to Father and looked ready to wring someone's neck off their head. Someone being Bella. "You can't! Our family has been neutral for aeons! We do not mingle in the fights of gods!"

I didn't know what to say. She was right. But my head was buzzing, my limbs felt numb. I – I was fighting the Sky God? For Bella? Why hadn't she told me this before?

"Chaos has already agreed," said Bella sweetly.

"No!" shouted Mother. "Chaos?!"

"It's alright," I said, suddenly coming to terms with everything all at once. This must have been what Bella had been talking about when she said to obey her today. And I would. I wouldn't go back on my word, especially not to humiliate her publicly. So I squared my shoulders and glared the Sky Lord down. "I'm doing this."

Bella squeezed my shoulder tightly, painfully so, then patted me. "See?" she said. There was a note of gloating there, of pride. It made me smile. She was proud of me!

"Well," Lucifer clapped his hands. "Good luck!" Then he turned to the Sky Lord. "To both, of course."

The Sky Lord scowled at his age-old enemy, knowing full well that Lucifer wanted nothing more than to see him beaten into the dust.

Mother groaned. Father was shaking his head. The Sky Lord turned to me. "You and I are going to have a serious talk after this," he said most patronizingly.

I sneered. Bella patted me on the shoulder. "I'll take your jacket," she murmured.

I gave her my checkered jacket then walked past my parents to the center of the stadium. I knew the rules for duels, and had even watched a few. There were pitifully little rules, anything was allowed, and the main thing was that you weren't exactly supposed to kill each other. But humiliation? A-okay. It was even expected, along with dramatics. A deity was supposed to show off their best moves and impress everyone.

So it really was too bad that the Sky Lord had avoided these duels most famously since his defeat by Kemosh. But that was, literally, ancient history. You'd suppose he'd have upgraded his moves since then.

"You're making a grave mistake, child," the Sky Lord said as he stepped up before me, staff in hand. I scowled at him.

Did I really expect to win? I wasn't sure. In my mind, I was half-hoping that Bella had some sort of plan to intervene and help me. Was the necklace going to give me extra powers?

"And now!" a ringmaster was bellowing for all to hear, voice magically amplified. "Let the fight begin!"

For a moment it was all just silence. The crowd, the wind, nothing moved. I was just standing there, glaring at the Sky Lord. My mind's buzzing ceased.

Then, with a flick of the wrist, I summoned my weapons.

I'd never seen someone who presented as so old move so fast. That staff whipped around and I jumped back just in time to not be cracked clear across the head.

A flurry of attacks rained on me next, but these carried the power of bufetting wind and enough magic to nearly knock me straight off my feet. My swords crashed up and against them, and I skidded back. My own magic was pitifully small compared to his. In a flash I knew that I was fighting the self declared god over all – and I was doomed.

Fucking doomed.

Let's break down god-power here. There is a certain amount that comes with age, a certain amount that is innate, and certain amount that is drawn from worshipers. Ye 'god of all' has nearly all the worshipers. That makes him, definitely, the god with the just-about-most-power out there.

As the staff crashed against my swords again, my mind was spinning. What the hell was I going to do? How could I win this? Was I supposed to lose? Was I supposed to stall?

Did Bella seriously expect me to win?!

That option was terrifying. I'd given her my word, my heart and soul, and now I was about to fail her. And somehow, I knew deep down that Bella wasn't going to be merciful in her punishment of my failure.

But I was thinking too much. The staff crashed again and lightning – Frickin' lightning! - came bolting down. It struck me, full on.

I screamed as the blinding light surrounded me and the pain – so much pain- jolted through me. The world careened and I landed on my knees.

Fuck. The Sky God was brandishing his staff, readying for another strike. He was taking his time though, showing off.

It gave me a split second to think. How had Kemosh defeated this doofus before? Before he became all-powerful, before he became the 'god of all'?

Human sacrifice. In the story, Kemosh's people, his devotees, had sacrificed a prince in order to stave off the Sky Lord's army. And it had worked.

A gear clicked into place in my head. That's why Bella had put me forward into this fight! It was useless to fight for oneself, one had to sacrifice for someone else in order to defeat him!

I staggered to my feet. The Sky Lord gave me a look. "Surrender," he intoned. "I'm being merciful."

"Yeah, right," I sneered as I held out an arm and slashed my wrist open beneath the bracelets. Then the other.

The Sky Lord paled. I took a deep breath. The sparking pain was okay, the feel of blood trickling down my hands was magical. I felt a renewed sense of energy, and power. Of devotion.

I was doing this for Bella. My sacrifice to her, of me.

I darted forward, blood magic pouring over my swords.

Another pointer for those who don't know: blood magic is very powerful, the power growing in levels of pain and the willingness given.

My attack sliced through a defending wind, crashed into the Sky Lord's staff – and cut through. Half the staff went flying, and I, now seeing red and unable to think, hacked on.

Wind buffeted at me. Lightning flashed but missed me. In a haze I recognized another part of the staff as flying away – then sliced through flesh.

Again. Again.

There was a yell, and the god crumbled down.

My blades hovered over him, but it was over. The old man was lying still in a pool of his own blood, chest quivering and eyes wide as he stared up at me.

"Healer! Healer!" the referee was shouting as they rushed over.

The red in my vision misted away. I heard the cheering of the crowd, and a hysterical laugh. Bella. Bella was pleased, Bella was happy.

In a rush I felt the reward, that sense of euphoria from her words. It was ecstatic, bursting through me like a warm glow.

I staggered. Someone was checking my wrists, someone else feeling my pulse at my throat. I wanted to shake them off to go see Bella, but I felt weak now. Just how much blood had I lost?

"Sit down!" the healing deity was ordering, but I just fell. My magic had run out.

Chapter Seventeen

I woke to a gentle light, and the feeling of soft bedstuff around me. Ahhh, yessss. I rolled over, snuggled in a pillow, and smiled to myself.

A flash of remembrance struck me, a vision of the Sky God as he fell, as I cut him down. It was clearer than I remembered it being, as if time had sharpened my view on all the nasty bits.

My eyes snapped open, my chest heaving. Where was I? Bella's room, as it turned out. On the incarnate plane, with a pile of incense burning beside me.

Inhaling deeply, I tried to sit up. I almost barfed. My bones ached, the world swam, and I felt horrible.

"Hey," grunted a voice beside me. Again, I startled. There, hands lifted as if they meant to do no harm, was a vampire. They were seated with a book in one hand. Had they been posted to just sit there and watch me?

"Our Queen wants to see you once you're awake," she said. Then, as I nodded, she added (as if she'd been avoiding saying this) "She is very pleased with you."

Oh-kay. Jealousy much? But I nodded. What the fuck else was there to do? Brush aside the compliment?

As soon as the vampire left (taking their bad mood away with them like a stormcloud), I dressed. It was a painful affair, thanks to the state I was in. The black t-shirt snagged around my neck, and I remembered the collar. A quick glance in the mirror, and yes, it was the collar. The sight of it made me smile. Lovely thing. It made me proud. I was glad everyone could see it, this mark of ownership. I was even more happy that I'd lived up to it yesterday.

Luckily I'd stepped away from ogling myself when Bella marched in.

"Chaos!" she said.

"Hey," I croaked as I finished pulling my boots on. Bella didn't care, coming right into my bubble.

"I'm so proud of you," she crooned, burying her fingers in my hair. Her grip tightened and I was pulled into a kiss. A happy kiss. Butterflies burst to life within me and I was smiling gleefully when she pulled back.

"We have a meeting," she said. "Lucifer wants to meet me. Come." Without waiting for my answer she turned and marched away. I followed, but not fast enough. With a yank the leash drew taught between us and I almost fell forward on my face. Yeouch! My neck! When had she clipped the leash on? It must have been during the kiss but I felt stupid for not noticing it.

Bella merely glanced over her shoulder, but hadn't slowed her pace. I'd gotten the point though, and was now rushing to her side. She smiled, pleased, and we continued on through the house.

The portal was outside, and we'd crossed about a dozen or so vampires by the time we reached it. Funny, but I barely thought anything of being seen leashed to Bella. Yes, I noticed the stares. But off the cuff, I thought it was more due to jealousy than anything. I didn't even rethink about the leash until we stepped into the portal, and that was because it whipped against my chest. After that, I entirely forgot about it, save for a warm feeling of pride deep inside of myself.

When the portal released us, we were before Lucifer's throne. Lucifer, as it was, looked content. He had a scroll in one hand, a book in the other, and a tablet on his lap. He sparkled more than usual and his makeup was on point. Also there was definitely no way anyone could walk in those heels.

"Oh hello," he said, rising to his feet and proceeding to prove me very wrong with a saunter. "How are you?"

In those heels, he towered over us by a full head or so. Still, it wasn't intimidating. Lucifer never outright tried to intimidate anyone. You could easily take him for granted – at your own expense.

"Namastay, namastay," crooned Bella sweetly. "We're good, how are you?"

"So good!" Lucifer flung out his hands – and I realized all the book and tablet and scroll had vanished when he'd stood up. "I haven't seen the angels look so humiliated in Years, darling." Turning his back to us he sauntered back to his throne, where he draped himself. His wrist flicked and a chair appeared, with a pillow at its feet. "Do sit down."

My jaw nearly struck the floor. A chair? These were infamously rare in Lucifer's realm. He 'never' allowed anyone to sit before him. But now- Bella carelessly took the seat, and nudged the pillow into place before herself. "Sit," she said to me.

On the pillow? On the floor? At her feet?

For just a second I hesitated, my old pride rearing up. I wasn't a lapdog!

But I was, I remembered. She had declared me hers, and if she wanted me to sit at her feet, then, sit at her feet I would.

Not necessarily pleased and somehow more embarrassed by this than by the leash, I sat down on the pillow.

"Aww," Lucifer crooned from his armrest. He held up his fingers so as to make a picture frame to see us through. "So cute. Nice pair."

I flushed. Bella smirked nastily. "What did you want to talk about?"

Lucifer dropped the finger-frame. "I wanted to tell you something, strike a deal, if you will."

Bella nodded. Lucifer grinned wickedly. "First of all, congratulations, girl. You've done so good. Come so far. I'm sure Nirvana is very close for you."

Bella hummed and nodded, accepting the compliment with narrowed eyes. Lucifer continued.

"I also see that your hive mind is coming along very well."

Bella startled. Lucifer chuckled. "Isn't that it? A hive mind? I've heard they're hard to run," here he lifted up his nails – they were decorated like claws with beads and glitter – and inspected them. "That's why I never wanted to run one, you see. Too much work. All the bla di bla -"

"What do you want?" barked Bella. Now it was my turn to startle. Was it safe to be interrupting Lucifer? But Bella looked like she was seething. A fact Lucifer didn't seem to give a rat's ass about.

"I like hive minds," Lucifer continued, waving his fingers in the air. "Always wanted one. So you see – that's all I want. Let me be part of your hive."

Bella turned her head to the side as if to deflect the weirdness of that. Lucifer waved his fingers some more about himself, now looking at Bella like she was not catching on fast enough. "You know? Observe? Have fun, listen in-"

"I know that," snapped Bella. "The question is why, Lucifer. You never do anything without a reason."

Lucifer laughed. "Really? Darling, you don't know me very well then, and you haven't stuck around her for sure. I'm quite not like the Sky God, you know that. I _like_ things to be pointless."

Bella's eyes were narrowing. She seemed really confused.

"So here's the deal," Lucifer's hand was now outstretched to Bella in offering. "You let me into your hive mind. And we work together. You and I, not causing chaos in the universe. We will listen to each other, make things harmonious. And," Lucifer's eyes lit up "I'll help you get that portal to Nirvana."

Bella looked ready to squirm. The corners of her lips were twitching upwards, yet her eyes were doubtful.

Lucifer cackled. "Think on it, baby girl."

"Lucifer is up to something," I said to Bella the moment we were alone. That meant that we had just stepped out of the portal and slipped inside the house. Now, we were in Bella's private room, pulling off our boots.

She raised her eyebrows at me as if amused. Like I was a cute puppy that was excitably licking her hand. I gritted my teeth.

"I know Lucifer," at least a bit. "He never does something for nothing. He's lazy, you know."

"He does do things for no reason sometimes, though," said Bella, quoting the liar of liars. "And besides," she thunked down into her large chair, fingering the leash between us. "What point is there in saying no to him?"

"The point," I said testily, "Is not to let him into the hive." It felt weird calling Bella's group, or goop of minds, a hive. Were we really all connected to her after 'ascension'? Or was Lucifer wrong? It wasn't beyond him, or any gods besides, to be wrong. But Bella wasn't correcting me.

"A hive is a collection of minds, sometimes led by a singular mind," she said, having probably just read mine. She shrugged. "I see no harm in having him added to it. It could even be a plus." And she pulled a pillow from her side and plunked it down to the floor. She nodded at it, and I knew she wanted me to sit. At her feet.

I did, pressing my lips together and swallowing down more of my pride. I secretly hoped it would endear her to me, would make her listen to my point more. "Bella," I folded my hands on her knee and propped my chin over them so my chin wouldn't dig into her leg. "Lucifer isn't someone to play games with. He's a trickster god." Not mean, but not easy to understand. "And he's definitely up to something."

Bella tutted. "Chaos, listen to yourself. Do you think I can't keep Lucifer in line?"

I hesitated, not knowing how to say that yes, she couldn't. Definitely not.

Maybe I thought too loud. A flash of anger made her eye flare with anger – and I didn't see it coming.

Crack! The slap struck me hard across the face.

"How dare you!" Bella shrieked, hand still raised. With a jump she was now on her feet and towering over me. "I can so keep him in line! Who do you think I am?"

Clutching my cheek I shrunk back, propped on my other hand. Fear flashed through me. Fear of what I wasn't sure – what could I logically be afraid of? - but for an instant I was terrified.

But then Bella lowered her hand. She breathed deeply and I thought it was over. "I will keep Lucifer in line," she said coldly. "I can do that, and easily." She smiled darkly at me, wickedly. When she spoke, the words were silent.

A gaping dread filled me. This wasn't the ecstasy of union or the joy of being around Bella. It was separation, a yawning gap between us that was cold like the wind. It hurt in that unspeakable way that depression or anxiety gnaws at the mind.

I was suddenly feeling near tears. My arms were wrapped protectively over my stomach. "Bella," I protested, pleading. This felt awful. I had lost something precious and now every cell in my body was mourning.

She reached down and I pawed at her pathetically, trying to unify through touch, to drag her closer. But all she did was unclip the leash. "Stay here and rot a bit," she snapped as she wrapped the leash back around her wrist. "Think on what you've said."

"B-" I wanted to protest and cry out her name all at once, but she was walking away, her back already turned to me. The door slammed shut behind her.

I wrapped my arms around my knees, heart feeling like it was ripping open in my chest.

It took me about an hour to get off the floor and to stop sobbing like a baby. I couldn't control it. No matter how much I told myself that it was just separation from Bella and that I was physically fine, I couldn't stop the pain.

The worst part was that I knew what she had done. I knew it was a spell of some sort, or whatever it was her word-power was. It was merely those words! But it hurt like a knife through me. My thoughts kept slipping away into blinding pain, and I kept forgetting that this wasn't 'real'. That this was just a spell. I found myself sobbing like I'd just lost a limb, and wishing that I hadn't been so foolish.

Then I remembered that I hadn't even said anything against Bella. I'd merely thought it. That fact flew me into a rage. How dared she do this to me! It was me who defeated the Sky God for HER! I was her best, her favorite, and she had no right!

I struggled to my feet, wiping my tears on the back of my hands. There! No more crying! Bella, you ungrateful bitch-

Just as I thought that, I remembered (or was I told through the hive in some way?) that Bella could hear me. That, and there was footsteps running towards the door.

I braced myself for whatever was to come. Was someone come to beat me for thinking so much? Well, bring it!

The door swung open, and it was Bella.

"Really?" she hissed, shutting the door behind herself.

I staggered. Every part of me was screaming out for her. I wanted her in the worst way. The idea of being on my knees for her flashed through my mind as such a beautiful idea, so soothing, so wholesome and completing.

No, no! I was angry and it was her fault – but that idea was slippery, gliding out of my mind the moment I didn't focus just on it.

I blinked, and Bella was before me. My mind was skipping through black windows. I hadn't seen her walk over, didn't see her move, but now her hand was in my hair. Another black window, and my mind was blank. What was I angry about anymore? It felt stupid, and I knew that whatever it was, it was my fault.

That knowledge sure in my mind, I felt myself collapse, exhausted and wanting nothing more than comfort. My knees slammed into the floor and I hugged at her legs, but was dragged back by my hair.

"Shhh, there now," Bella said soothingly, combing my hair from my face with one hand while holding me in a death-grip with the other. "Are you sorry now?"

I choked on a sob, nodding as I blinked through tears.

"You won't do it again, will you?" Bella asked, just her voice being not enough. It soothed, but it was like a trickle in a desert and I needed more. I was burning for her, to be reunited with her. It felt like I couldn't exist without her. Desperate, I nodded.

Her hands caressed my shoulders. She had crouched down and was hugging me to her chest. "You're so disobedient, you've been so bad," she crooned, holding me tight. "You're a bad slave, Chaos."

I whimpered, clutching at her.

"I love you anyways," she whispered into my ear. "You know that, don't you? I love you like no one else ever will."

A sob tore through me – and then she spoke the words. It was sheer relief. Like a light through the mind. Like a cold compress on burning heat. There really is no words to express it. It made me gasp, and my entire body relaxed, sagging against her.

Bella shushed me, cuddling me against her. But, for a flicker, I wanted to draw away. I felt like I had a head again, like I could think. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts to digest what had happened.

But then, like a bite, there was sharp ecstasy. The pleasure of being with Bella. The euphoria. It was not too strong, more like the scent of a spring breeze. But it was enough to send me into a fit of giggles against her.

My head was pulled back and I was looking into Bella's eyes. "Well?" she said softly. "Better now?" To which I nodded, gulping back tears that seemed pointless now. "Good," she murmured, wiping my tears away with her gloved fingers. "Don't ever do that again." and she kissed me passionately, claiming me. I gave way eagerly, wanting nothing more than to be hers, to receive more of the ecstasy. But she didn't give me any more. I was lifted up to my feet a moment later and instructed to rest in bed for the remainder of the day. I protested at first, wanting to spend it with her, but the moment I lay down I realized that, indeed, I was exhausted. Too much emotions, I thought before I drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Eighteen

I woke, groggy but determined. As I had slept in bursts and hiccups, I had time to think, and think, and think. My mind kept feeling grogged, but I was determined now to- something. Be better. It was a hazy idea, but I wanted to improve things. I wanted to make Bella happy. I was going to do that – somehow.

My mind just couldn't compute a solid answer!

When I finally woke for good, the first thing I did was splash water on my face in the washroom. That turned my skin cold, but did very little to actually rouse me. I felt trapped in a mist.

Grumbling but still determined to... something?... I dressed and stomped from the room.

"AH!" I yelped as a vampire was just – standing there.

She looked down at me, peeling her lip back from her teeth in a grimace. "You're, awake."

"No," I snarked, hand on my thumping heart. "I'm dead."

The vampire paused. The sarcasm seemed to have confused her.

"Where is Bella?" I asked.

"She has orders for you to stay inside the house until her return," said the vampire. "Rest or, something," she finished with a shrug.

I scowled at her before brushing past her to the stairs.

A hand slammed down on my shoulder. I whirled around to face miss fang-face. "Where do you think you're going?" she hissed, stooping so her breath was straight in my face.

"Breakfast," I hissed back, rising up to snarl in her face. "Or something."

Rolling her eyes, she let me go. I turned around and stomped down the stairs, fully convinced that I was going to do the 'something' part of my statement. I just wasn't sure what it would be. But sitting around and just waiting for Bella? That didn't feel right.

But first, really, I had to eat. And if there was coffee to be found- it was to be mine.

There was three beefy werewolves in the kitchen, pouring blood into baggies. They looked at me, then the middle one, Munch as it so happened, straightened.

"Hey, if it isn't the little kitten!" he sneered. Dusting his hands off on his apron, he strolled over to me. "What'll it be? Want some milk?"

Oh gawwwwd. I smirked, trying to not listen to him. Whatever. "With cereal," I said sweetly, trying to somehow turn the joke on him. "Can you manage that?"

"Oh, for you? Sure, kitten," and he reached to ruffle my hair.

I punched him in the gut. My reasoning? If I was Bella's precious kitten he couldn't really punch back, could he?

Well, as it turned out, I was right. Munch straightened, lifted a fist, then double checked himself. I smirked. Victory. Alea jacta whatever.

I bumped past him into the kitchen. "So where is this food? Theoretically?" And I propped myself against the counter right before this big window.

I picked it because, really, cool window? Nice view while eating my cereal and being smug? It turned out to be the worst decision, like, EVER.

The sniper must have been like 'Dude, my lucky day' and shat themself in excitement.

Oh wait, they're Canadian, so it must have been 'Eh, dude, my lucky day eh?'. Then, presumably, they apologized to me.

Because, really, after two point oh seconds before this window, it shattered inwards and something whacked into my neck. Glass showered over me in little slicing bits and I yelled wordlessly in surprise as I ducked forward.

"What the fuck?" I asked, crouched down beside the counter – not under a window this time. Munch and the others were also crouched down, eyes wide and ogling me.

Munch pointed at me, more specifically my neck. "Your neck!"

I touched, and felt the feathers. Damn. Sweet Jesus on a stick and fuckity fuck fuck. I pulled it out, then glared at it. It was a black metal vial with white and blue feathering. I threw it angrily on the floor.

"What the fuck?" I hissed angrily as if it was Munch's fault. Scrambling, I poked my head up to look back out the window. There was the town, or more precisely the rooftops.

Munch was on a walkie talkie. "There's a sniper firing shots into the house. Repeat, a sniper-"

The world lurched around me. The floor crashed up to me. I jolted, spasming once. Twice. The cold tiles were hard against me as I thrashed in a seizure.

"Shi-i-it," I heard Munch hiss.

But, of fucking course, he didn't even come to help. They just stood in their corner of the kitchen, talking on the walkie talkie. Their words faded into a jumble, and as I railed angrily against them, the scene faded.

"FUCK YEAH!" someone fairly roared, jolting me awake.

My eyes flew open, my nostrils flared, and I was struck by the sudden newness of this scenario. The smell of champagne, the moving masses around me.

"We did it!" someone was cheering. "We did it, we did it, we did it!"

I looked around, but could barely see. There was juts these white blobs massing around me, and I couldn't move.

Then - "Alright officers, take that party outside," said a voice that was unmistakeable. FoxFace.

I blinked and shook my head. I twisted my arms and felt bonds. I blinked again and the world slid a little more into focus. Someone patted me on the shoulder. "Hello Chaos,"

I spat at the shape that was generally before me.

"Oh, gross!" said FoxFace. She wiped her face, and slid finally into focus. She was grinning as she wiped her face on her sleeve. "Good to see it's still you and we didn't bodyswap you with a chipmunk or something."

I looked around, heart pounding in my throat. Back in the lab. It shouldn't be scary, but for some reason it was terrifying. Something in me was running a mile a minute, indeed like a chipmunk, and -

"Whoah," Foxface frowned, looking at a panel beside me. "What, are you happy to see me? Your stats are running high. Calm down, soldier."

My snark was lost. My mind was reeling. An overwhelming sense of panic was drowning me and something was flashing through my mind like a warning signal, telling me that I was in dire danger.

But of what?

"Hey," FoxFace leaned again into my field of vision. "You seem to be having a panic attack."

I couldn't breathe, the fear was choking me. Bella! I needed Bella- and it clicked in my mind. I was away from Bella. I was away from the 'hive', and her touch.

So this was withdrawal? Wow.

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to rationalize this panic. Trying to remind myself that I was fine, that I could breathe just fine without Bella there.

FoxFace was talking coolly. "You know if we were friends I could give you something to help, but we're not, so I'm not going to bother."

I tried to glare at her, but instead the vision swam fuzzily. I tried to breathe but the air wouldn't come. The sight of FoxFace was reminding me of Bella. So I tipped my head back and stared at the ceiling, only to realize that Bella was going to be furious.

Emotions crashed over me like a tsunami. Powerful, ripping at my mind and dragging sense away.

Bella was going to be so angry! So angry! I'd disobeyed her order to stay home! She was going to be furious!

I tried to rationalize, but that thought drifted away, torn out of my mind and replaced with a sheer panic. I'd disobeyed! I was going to be punished!

Something stung my arm but I barely noticed. Then, like a cool bath over a fever, plastic and fake calm rushed through me. It wasn't complete, but just like having my head lifted out of the water, but the waves were still up and clogging my nose.

Indeed, I was gasping as I came to my senses, seeing FoxFace frowning at me with a needle in hand. The needle was only half empty.

"You're having strange side effects," she said with a frown. Then, tipping her head to the side she added playfully "Or are you really that scared of me?"

I gasped, struggling to keep the internal screaming just that – internal. "Give me the rest of that." I needed it. Anything, something. I just wanted to breathe again. I had to get this panic to stop. It was just getting stronger and it was rising up again, drowning out my thoughts. Tears were stinging my eyes and my breathing was turning into hiccups again.

"Yeah, maybe," she said. But she didn't. Instead she just stood there, needle in hand, and observed.

I hiccuped, twisted on myself, and crushed my eyes closed. It just made everything worse. The screaming couldn't be stopped now. My skin was itching all over and I heard my breath gasping, felt my face tingle, and knew I was about to faint.

Blind panic was filling me and it felt like I was falling into a tunnel when there was another prick in my arm. The world swerved and careened drunkenly back to me. I opened my eyes to see FoxFace, to feel her latex gloved fingers holding my chin to face her. She was frowning.

I gritted my teeth, wiling myself to be 'together'. To be strong. It's just a hive withdrawal, I told myself. You'll be back to Bella soon. Pull it together!

But I couldn't. Tears were running down my cheeks, I was shaking, and I was furious with myself for being so weak. Then, as if in answer, the world turned black.

Chapter Nineteen

"Chaos," Bella was standing before me, leash in hand. "Where are you?"

"Bella!" I cried out. I wanted to reach her, but couldn't move. I was stuck!

"Chaos?" Bella was looking left and right, irritation clear in her voice. "Come, here." It was an order. And every cell in my body was trying to answer. I felt myself spasm, felt my skin nearly tearing off my bones so much I was trying to reach her.

But something inside was holding me back, hiding me. I screamed furiously, trying to claw my way to her.

"Chaos!" Bella called out angrily. There was going to be repercussions to this, I knew it. But I was trying, Bella, I was trying!

Bella began to speak, I saw her mouth moving, and felt the abhorrent result. She was punishing me already. "Come home when you're ready," I heard her say as an evil darkness opened up within me.

It felt like a pit of snakes being opened up within me. Wordless pain seeped through me, clawing at me from the inside out.

I screamed, clawing at myself. It felt like my blood was on fire. A painful jolt zapped through me, and for a breath I felt disconnected from the pain. In a rush it returned – then another zap brought slight relief. A third- and I was awake in the lab.

My body was gasping, and there was a whole team of lab coats around me now.

"We've got heart beat," one voice was saying.

"Still not stable," and I recognized Leo's voice.

My vision swam, but somehow I fixated on FoxFace, frowning at the foot of my bed with her arms crossed. Quite suddenly, I realized I was going to die if I wasn't sent back. Bella had just that much control over me. I was going to die, my soul being bound to her now. This pain was just too much-

"Put him out," FoxFace ordered. "It's obviously not working."

Thank you, I thought. Just kill me and send me back to my master. Send me back...

A mask was placed over me. I gulped at the air, hoping it was a painless poison.

Actually, it was anesthetic. I passed out cold.

I had no dreams, no visions, nothing. When I woke I felt fresh, clear, awake as if I had been asleep for ages.

I sat up, blinking blearily as I looked around. I was wearing a hospital gown and cuffed to the bed on both sides, and there was a hospital blanket and sheets over me. Oh yes, and FoxFace sitting in the chair beside my bed.

"Good," she said. "You're awake."

Uh, I looked around what looked like a hospital room. It was just us, but something felt missing. I tried to feel my chest, but couldn't lift my arm that far.

"Feel better?" FoxFace asked, rising to her feet. She leaned against the railings, seeming pleased with herself.

"Fuck off," I muttered, still wondering what was missing. Everything felt so – quiet. Empty. Like I was missing a part of myself. Again, I tried to lift my arm.

"You're welcome," said FoxFace grimly. "I'm the one who got you to stop seizing, by the way."

"Wouldn't be seizing if I wasn't here," I bit back savagely. Again, I tried to lift my arm – then saw a small pile of things in a bag beside the chair where FoxFace had been sitting. My sweater was poking out the top.

I looked down at my bare wrists. Bare arms. Then, it clicked in my head.

"Fuck!" I exclaimed, trying again to reach, but this time with a goal. Where was my collar? Where was it? I twisted my head, and felt nothing around my neck. They had taken Bella's collar off. And with it, it seemed, they had somehow broken the bond with Bella.

"Where's my collar?" I demanded, eyeballing FoxFace.

She smirked, obviously knowing something. "Oh, don't worry. It's not lost."

A wave of anger rose in me. That was my collar, my special bond with Bella! Mine! "You had no right!" I yelled. What was Bella going to think? Was she going to think that I had wanted this? No, please, no!

FoxFace's smirk turned grim. "Are you going to panic again? Do I have to call in the squad to get your levels back under control? Or are we going to talk like adults?"

I gritted my jaw. I wanted to punch her so bad. I twisted my wrist against the cuffs. "Take these off, then we can talk."

"No. You calm down and talk, now."

I scowled. She glared coolly back. "Ready?" she asked.

I rolled my eyes up to stare at the ceiling. Anywhere but at her. I was so, so, mad at her. "You have no idea what you've done," I hissed.

There was a laugh. FoxFace pointed a finger at me. "You, have no idea what I've done."

I glared at her. "Fine," I snapped. "Then care to explain yourself?"

FoxFace gestured at me. "Are you going to be reasonable?"

I sneered. "No."

"Okay then," and she just turned around and walked out of the room.

"Hey!" I shouted after her. "Get back here!"

Her head poked back into the room. "Changed your mind that fast?"

The cuffs jangled as I tried to strangle her, but obviously didn't get very far. "Get back here and explain yourself!" I barked. "Give me back my stuff!"

FoxFace rested an elbow on the doorframe, watching me with obvious glee. "Does this mean you're going to be reasonable? We could strike a deal, you know."

I rattled the cuffs again, trying to twist my way out of them. It was getting me nowhere. "Fine! Just-"

FoxFace stepped back in and shut the door behind herself. Smug, she drew the chair closer and sat directly beside my bed. "So," she said.

I almost hissed, I was so mad at her. Instead I pressed my lips together to try and not say something insulting.

FoxFace gestured. "Aren't you curious at all as to 'how' you got here? No?"

I tried to cross my arms and yanked on my wrists without thinking. Ugh. "Oh, I was awake for part of it," I sneered. "I got shot in the neck!"

"M-hmm," said FoxFace, nodding like I was a cute specimen in a tube. "And then?"

I scowled. "You obviously kidnapped me. Again, might I add. Why do you keep doing this?"

FoxFace grinned nastily. "Because we didn't. I-," she reached into her coat pocket and drew out a vial of blood. She waved it between us and I sensed bottled up magic. "I summoned you."

I blanched. "Su-mmoned?"

She pocketed the vial. "M-hmm. It pays to be a witch in the army these days."

I blanched even blanch-ier. Oh no. "You're a -" Oh, shit.

"A witch? Oh yes, and dare I say, you're the most powerful specimen we've had access to so far. Which is why we're taking our tests out on you." she crossed two fingers between us. "We're beginning to merge the worlds, Chaos. Thanks to the unique constitution of your blood, we're gaining access to things for the first time in history."

My throat felt dry.

"Of course," she continued. "We started by sending you away – why else do you think we just shipped you away? And now we're practicing getting you back. Took us a few days, but we managed. Now we know how to do it. Next is, well, control and usage." She gave me a deadpan look, no mirth. "We're going to put you to work now."

I half laughed, half just didn't know what to think. "You can't hold me," was all that came to me, out of sheer incredulousness.

"Oh?" she asked.

"You can't," of course not. "I've escaped before, and I can do it again."

FoxFace ducked her head, smirking. "Oh, poor kid. We let you go, you know?" She looked back up and she genuinely seemed to pity me. "We let you go. Leo, escaping, we wanted to observe you 'in the wild' so to speak. Of course, once Leo's life was endangered we aborted the mission so hey – but he'd already gotten enough of your statistics to allow us to do this."

My jaw fell. "Leo-?"

"Was studying you," she said flatly. "We staged your escape, Chaos."

Chapter Twenty

I sat in stunned silence. Leo? Staged? Uhhh, okay. I tried to compute what was happening, what that meant, but all that came to mind was that this was all FoxFace's fault. She, who was sitting right before me.

She who kept speaking. "I hope you understand, but I don't think you do."

"I do," I said, despite feeling utterly baffled.

"Do you?" her lips quirked up. "So then, you understand what we want from you now?"

I had no idea, and found myself shaking my head. What could they possibly want? I was an immortal- well, maybe immortal, being. "You want me to run around killing things?" Like an action hero?

"Oh, no," FoxFace shook her head as if I'd made a silly mistake. "We are getting quite a handle on the vampire situation, thank you. We don't need your help – what we want is for you to capture Bella, your leader, for us. That's all."

My jaw dropped. I felt nauseous.

"You see, she seems to have a particular power, and we think that – well, you'd be perfect for the job."

"No!" I blurted. "I'm not doing that! Get someone else to do it!"

FoxFace grinned. "Really? What if they hurt her in the process? Honestly, if she's your girlfriend, don't you want her to be – not hurt?"

Baffled, I just gawked. They couldn't - "She's my girlfriend!" I squawked. "You can't ask me to do that!"

FoxFace had a slight smirk on, but she meant it. "I think I can." Like I was some challenge she just wanted to beat.

I gritted my teeth, but she kept on. "You'll find it hard to resist orders written in your own blood."

Oh, crap. Orders written in blood were... very powerful if you knew how to do it properly. An unfinished order could drive a spirit insane. And judging that they'd already summoned me, FoxFace knew what she was doing.

So, I fibbed. "I won't be able to. Bella is too powerful."

FoxFace snorted. "Bullshit. She has displayed no actual power other than being very influential. That's it. She's just good at controlling others, but never defends herself."

My throat turned dry. That... seemed awfully true.

"You've got a decent shot at it," said FoxFace calmly. "And, if you succeed, I'll let you go home for a bit. Rest up. A lunar month, then you come back to me."

"Wha- no!" I was not someone's toy to send around! And certainly not hers! "I-" but the look on FoxFace's, well, face, stopped me. She looked so amused. Like I was a kid throwing a tantrum. Because, really, I was a puny toy to her. Powerless.

I gritted my jaw. She tilted her head to the side. "Done?" she asked.

I didn't know what to say. So I didn't say anything.

"So," Foxface straightened out her smile. "You are going to either do it willingly or be forced to. Which one would you prefer?"

And, business-like, she extended a hand. "We can be friends, Chaos."

I wanted to spit on her hand. But maybe now was the time to try and level up my treachery points. "Let me go, and I'll do it," I said flatly. Like hell I would.

"Good," FoxFace drew back her hand. "Here's how it's going to work. We will send you back the way we retrieved you. You will merely have to enter into physical contact with Bella, such as placing your hand on her arm, and use the sigil I will give you."

I nodded grimly. I hated lying. But the imperative was to get back to Bella. She would know what to do.

A dozen minutes or so and one dizzying travel later, I materialized gracelessly in Bella's kitchen. Or rather, the kitchen of her house.

There was still glass everywhere. The windows were patched up with boards and werewolves were again trying to cook something (it smelt awful) and the world was swerving. Bang! The floor smashed up to me.

Cursing, I decided that whatever way it was that they were using to 'travel' me, it sucked. Terribly.

Gritting my teeth I pushed myself up off the floor. Boots were around me, but no hands reached down to help me up. Thanks, no one.

Still dizzy, I managed up onto my feet. I staggered, the world swerving gently now.

Then, an electric shock went through me. All my hair stood on end. My nerves tingled and bells went off in my head.

The door to the kitchen swung open and Bella herself marched in, eyes on me like a super trained assassin and me the target. I smiled dopily.

"Where were you?" she demanded. "What happened?"

Her words were an angry whipcrack to my mind. She wasn't pleased, not in the slightest.

I steadied myself on the counter.

"Where is your collar?" she hissed.

I ran a hand through my hair. "We need to talk." was my brilliant retort.

Bella seized me by the arm and dragged me after her. Across the living room filled with whispering vampires, up the flight of stairs, then with a jerk I was tossed into her room. I stumbled, and the door was shut behind us. With a sigh I let myself slide down to the floor. I cradled my head in my hands.

"What, Happened?" Bella barked, her boots planted before me.

Combing my hair back I looked up. "They have my blood. They summoned me."

Bella stiffened. Her nostrils flared. A look of, something, crossed her face.

"They ordered me to come and get you – it's you they want! They are going to kidnap you, Bella – you should maybe go to the spirit realm or something -"

Bella turned her face away, looking at the large Buddha on her wall.

"And they – they can now summon me, and order me to do things. They've got a witch -"

"A witch?" Bella repeated, still staring at the painting.

I nodded. "The commander who shot you. She's a witch. And you're what they want. They think they can use me to get to you."

Bella nodded. As if rousing from sleep, she shrugged and looked to me. "How did you get here?"

"I promised I would go get you, and they sent me back." I fidgeted, and cracked half a smile. "I'm sorry I couldn't come back when you tried to summon me."

But, impervious to my not so secret desires, Bella didn't crouch down and comfort me. She stayed up on high, now crossing her arms as she looked down at me. "That witch must be strong to have held you against my will."

I gestured lamely. "They took the collar." Which evidently did something.

Now Bella crouched down before me. She placed her hand upon my cheek. I felt a warm tingling within and smiled giddily. But it was just that, small and giddy. The flutters of love. Not a huge chemical rush.

"They broke the bond," she whispered, eyes wide. "How did they do that?"

I shook my head. "The collar?"

Bella stood briskly. "We are going to do something." She looked to her Buddha on the wall, then down at me. "Get up," and she reached down for me.

I took her hand and was hauled up. With a curt 'come', I was led out of the room. Down the stairs. Into the living room, where about a dozen vampires were milling, whispering with the handful of werewolves.

The air was thick with a feeling of magic. I could feel how something like a web was woven between them. As we arrived it grew stronger, linked to Bella's proximity.

"Knife," Bella ordered, stopping in the center of the group with me at her side. A knife was promptly handed to her.

"Hands," she said to me.

I obeyed, realizing what she was going to do after.

Quickly, efficiently, she slashed the knife across both my palms. Yeouch! But I held still. Tossing the knife back at the vampire who had given it to her, she took my hands and raised them to my neck. "On your throat," she ordered. "Smear it."

Okay. I did as I was told as she marched to the mantle piece, out of the little circle. There she stopped, collecting herself. One deep breath, and she looked squarely at me. "I need to send a clear message," she said, so all could hear. "I can't let them have you."

I nodded. Yes! So let's finish this spell. Because uh, Bella? It's not brilliant to be a bloody mess in the middle of a circle of vampires. They were doing their best to hold it in, and the fact they hadn't lunged for me the minute she cut me was a tribute to her power over them. But now they were breathing heavily, covering their noses with hands, and eyeballing me like I was crack and they were the druggies who wanted one more snort.

Bella looked down at the floor. She took another deep breath. Then, she straightened. Power and queenliness radiated from her and I smiled. There she was. My Queen.

"Eat her," she said clearly, for all to hear.

"What?" I said.

The vampires seemed to be thinking the same thing. There was a hair's split of a second where they all froze, no one breathing.

Bella snapped her fingers, and the web rippled with a command. The vampires lunged for me.

"Jesus FUCK!" I yelled, ducking as I shook out my weapons. Magic burst from me, creating a small sphere of protection around me. Bodies crashed against it and it barely held.

"Bella!" I yelled in disbelief, feeling my sphere wobbling. She was just beyond the mass, just by the mantlepiece still. Except now she had a bow in her hand and was setting a blue tipped arrow to it.

With a crackle, my sphere broke down. Hack! Slash! Magic coursed over me and I bashed at the wave of bodies grappling at me. My swords cut through limbs, but hands from behind grappled at me. I spun, trying to set up another sort of sphere, but I remembered the sigil.

It had been fairly simple, and was in my pocket right now on a laminated piece of paper. FoxFace had held it before my face.

"Memorize it," she'd ordered. "When you need to come back, just visualize it and wish to come to wherever I am. I'll be waiting."

Okay, I visualized it. And I sure as hell wished to get away from being vampire chow.

The world swerved, bucked, and smash! I was in a room flooded with synthetic lights brighter than the glare of the sun.

I staggered as this new world swung around me, slashing at whatever was around me. There were shrieks all around me and the hiss of burning flesh. Bright spots danced before my eyes and I staggered blindly – until my arm was grabbed and twisted behind me in a lock.

"Enough," said FoxFace from behind me. "You're going to hurt someone."

I blinked. My arm was released and I squinted. I was in a white room that had mirrored walls and (as I said before) these glaring lights all over the ceiling. But what I first thought to be pillars along the wall were, in fact, soldiers with large guns lining it. And right before me, the foxiest of them all.

She stepped around me, nudging the pile of vampire ashes with a boot. She was wearing reflective sunglasses. "So where is Bella?"

I shielded my eyes with a sleeve. "Huh?"

FoxFace turned to me calmly. "You were sent to collect someone? Or did you already forget your mission... goldfish?"

"Goldfish?" I mouthed. She pointed to my hair, smirking.

"Goldfish," she repeated. "I think that should be your tactical name. It suits you."

The soldiers sniggered. Some snorted. I scowled, but no one seemed to care.

"So, you told her?" FoxFace said so calmly.

I chewed my cheek. I looked anywhere but across the desk, where FoxFace was sitting. I sat on my side of the desk in her office, hands bandaged, blood washed away, and a glass of water at my side. But the last thing I wanted was a silly drink.

Bella had tried to kill me. For real now. She'd set the vampires upon me, after having me smear blood on my neck. Yep, just so they knew where to aim. Uh, she'd put a lot of thought into getting me eaten? Like, who did that? And why?

The worst part was that I knew why. What had she said again? 'I can't let them have you'? Jesus fuck, what the hell? Did she think I would turn on her? Or did she think that now I was merely a liability?

But how could she want to _kill_ me? I was her big squeeze! We were lovers and after everything we'd been through, she just – sicced her vamp squad on me?

But she loved me. I knew that for a fact. I'd felt in through her power. She loved me.

"Chaos!"

I jumped, then scowled at FoxFace. "What?" I snapped.

"I am speaking, and you will listen," she said in a tone that demanded respect. Well, request denied. I lounged back in my chair, crossing my arms over my chest. I stared her down, challenging her to... I didn't know what. But I hated her. It was all her fault. She had taken the collar off me, broken my bond with Bella, and nearly got me murdered.

"Listen," said FoxFace. I rolled my eyes to the ceiling. She took in a sharp inhale. "Do you really want to do this the hard way?"

Go on, show me, I goaded her silently. I refrained from saying that, at least, but I left my eyes up on the ceiling. What-ever. Talk away, girl, you can't force me to listen.

FoxFace took a deep breath. Then, in a low murmur, she spoke.

"Your eyes are wide, your ears are open. Your lips are sewn shut, your body is still. Look at me, and listen."

Oh, fuck, I thought as I felt my head tilt down and my eyes focus on her. My ears strained to hear whatever she had to say and – try as I might – I couldn't move. And my mouth was definitely shut tight.

Fuck me.

Pleased with her witchcraft, FoxFace clasped her hands on the table between us. "Now that I have your full and undivided attention, I am going to say something. And I'm only going to say it this once."

I would have nodded, but that wasn't really an option anymore.

"Now Chaos, I'm going to let you in on a secret. I run this whole 'dealing with the mumbo jumbo' project. I own you. And if ever you want to not be owned, and have freedom to dilly dally your day away, I highly recommend you- mmm, stop being an ass?" She smirked, pausing before adding. "You can nod."

I distinctly refused to do so. No nodding from me – though I really got her point, and was busily trying to think of a way out. Maybe I had to... kill her? That wasn't really my thing though. Killing too many incarnates could turn a soul demonic, and I really didn't want that.

I wished I had my dice. Decisions were hard to make when you didn't know the outcome before hand.

"So," she said sharply. "Here's what you want to do. In order to get on my good side you're going to bring me Bella, unharmed, fully functional, and in one piece. Try and pull any stunts, warn her again – I know you warned her, that's probably why you had a horde of vampires trying to eat you – and you will see what I do to spirits that disappoint me." She nodded curtly. "Permission to speak freely."

"Fuck you!" I snapped the moment my jaw would work again. "You don't-" get to boss me around? I rethought my sentence. "I'm the child of the Grim Reaper, and of Life. You don't want to get on my bad side. My family will come for me."

FoxFace's eyebrows rose. "Do you take me for an idiot? I couldn't have picked a better soul to take possession of. Your family is neutral in all aspects and refuses to meddle in affairs. They will let you rot. And my sources tell me that you have no one who will come to your rescue, point blank. You have no alliances. So do you want to try that bluff again?"

I gritted my jaw. How the hell did she know so much? Weren't mortals usually all scared of the Grim Reaper and thought all spirits were boogie men or something like that?

"How do you know so much about me?" I scoffed. "And what makes you think you're right?"

FoxFace gave me a deadpanned glare. "My sources don't lie."

"Sources?" I sneered. "Who are they?"

FoxFace cracked a rare smile. "Don't you wish you knew?"

I scowled – then thought of who I needed to help me. Lucifer. If anyone knew how to weasel your way out of curses and hexes, it was the man himself – or herself, depending on Lucifer's mood.

So I put on my dapper charm, snapped my fingers, and fixed all of my problems just like that. Ha ha. No.

"Lookit," I said calmly, trying to think of 'what would Lucifer do?' as a way to come up with a great lie. "I have an idea."

"Is that a rare thing?" FoxFace asked so seriously it took me a minute to catch it. But once I did, I put on a plastic smile.

"How about I go catch Bella and bring her to you?" I said in my suave tone. "And here's how I'll do that. I'll go to the spirit world, catch her, and bring her back."

FoxFace looked completely unimpressed. I cleared my throat, trying again. "This means you help me get to the spirit realm."

FoxFace steepled her fingers between us. "You think you've got a friend who will rescue you from me? Or do you really think you can outrun me?"

Uh, neither? Because Lucifer is no one's friend?

"I have your blood," she said coldly. "You're not outrunning me. So just get Bella, and bring her here. How complicated is that?"

I pressed my lips together. My mind spun. Trickery was not my strong suit. "Look," I snapped. "Just send me to the spirit realm. Can you do that?"

"Tell me why," she said, mildly amused. "Because I know Bella isn't there. She's in this plane, and seems intent on staying here."

I leaned forward across the table. "That's because she wants to get three portals together to get into the plane of nirvana. She-" I paused, not sure how much to say or what to say even. It's not like Bella had unveiled her massive plan to me. "She wants to get there," I finished lamely. "So," I took a deep breath, biding time to spin my lie. What could impress a witch? "I'm going to get Lucifer to help me," I said outright.

I swore I saw FoxFace smirk. It egged me on. "With him, I won't get hurt and you will definitely get Bella."

FoxFace unsteepled her fingers and lay her palms flat on the desk. "You think you can get Lucifer to catch Bella for you?"

"I can be convincing," I said, feeling rather successful.

FoxFace smiled nastily. "Go ahead then. I'll have a portal made for you to the underworld. But-" she pointed a finger at me. "If you don't bring Bella back this time, there will be consequences."

I snorted. "You say that like I'm irresponsible."

She raised her eyebrows. I decided it was best not to add any more comments to that mess.

Chapter Twenty One

So, if you've been following, that was how I ended up smack! Face-first on the tiles of Lucifer's throne room. Because, yeah, the portal FoxFace had made for me was rickety in essence and it was a sickening ride. So much so that I rose to my knees and barfed bile.

"Oh hey-y!" said a pair of sparkling high heels right before me. "What's up?"

I looked up at Lucifer. They looked down, smirking. Dressed in an elegant evening dress full of rhinestones and wearing rainbow earrings and bearing their grey hair in a levitation around them, like they were permanently descending from the sky. S/he looked majestic and regal, like they'd just stepped off a throne. Well, they probably just had.

"I need help," I croaked.

"Who doesn't?" said the Lord of lords, rolling their eyes dramatically at the ceiling. "Earlier on, I had to get this zipped up my back on my own. It wasn't easy!"

I just blinked. Zippers? That's what s/he was complaining about?

Lucifer crouched down to my side. A waft of exquisite perfume wafted over me. His elbow nudged mine and a sparkling hand dusted my shoulder. "You poor, poor thing," Lucifer crooned. "What's the matter?"

I shuddered. Instantly I just wanted to relax and let myself rest against him. But that was a dangerous feeling. I needed to keep my wits about me! So I used the only real tactic that worked on Lucifer: honesty of sorts.

"I need to break a blood bond. A witch has my blood."

Lucifer tutted. "Now look what mess you've gotten yourself into."

"They stole my blood," I hissed. "And now they want-" I gulped and stared into those crystalline blue eyes. "They want me to kidnap Bella."

"Oh?" Lucifer tilted their head to the side. A finger trailed up my neck, sending shivers over my spine. "That's a pity."

"I need to break the blood bond. What do I do?"

Lucifer smirked, playing with a strand of my hair. "You need a haircut," they said cheerfully.

"I cut my hair?" I asked hopefully. That easy? "That will break the bond?"

"No you idiot," they snapped, standing in a swoop. "I was just saying that you need a haircut."

My hopes crushed down into my gut. Asshole.

"No, you see," dramatic as ever, Lucifer turned and strolled to their throne. "Blood magic is terrible magic. Strong magic. Very, very, difficult to break." With a smirk s/he added. "That's why you defeated the olde yahweh with it." and they sniggered. "How ironic that it has now been used against you."

I paused. Could it be that it wasn't irony? That someone had snitched on what I'd done and given the witch that idea? "She has a source," I said. "Someone who knows me is feeding her information."

Lucifer turned to me. "Oh? Do you know who?"

I shook my head. Dusting myself off, I stood. "No. But I know that they've told her quite a lot. She isn't frightened of me in the slightest, and I can't seem to get leverage over her."

Lucifer snorted. "I can't imagine why anyone would be the slightest bit afraid of you. You're chaotically useless. Oh, and on the subject of snitches, how is your ex fiancee?"

My mind hit a wall. "She's the one who snitched?"

Lucifer made a sad face but didn't say any more.

"How could she?" But I knew why. I'd dumped her, she was mortal, and now she'd had her revenge on me. With a sigh I kneaded a knuckle against my forehead. Swept my bangs back. "Okay," I said. "Now what? What do I do to fix this?"

"Ah," Lucifer swirled around in a cascade of silky fabrics. "Now you're talking, tadpole."

First goldfish, now tadpole? Seriously people?

"First," Lucifer sauntered over to me. "You need to bring Bella something. Something big, to show your allegiance. After all," and now that Lucifer was directly before me, they stooped to look me in the eyes. Their perfume wafted out – and something else. A trace of Bella. A scent of her.

"You're in the hive," I gulped, horror drenching me.

"Oh yes," crooned Lucifer. "So I know that she's set out a death call on you. But I'm willing to set that aside for just a moment. Let lovers reunite." A finger was held up between our faces. "Bella wants a portal, but not just any portal. She needs one to Nirvana."

"But I can't give her that!"

Lucifer laughed in my face. "You idiot. Don't you know of Amitabha? The Buddha who vowed to save every last soul? The Buddha who vowed that if one called on them in their final moments, they would save the departing one?"

I shrugged. "Barely."

"I'll make it really simple then. If you die while reciting Amitabha's name, they will take you to the Pure Lands. Right?"

"A portal!" I gasped. "But -"

Lucifer winked. "Don't worry, I've already told Bella you're here."

"What?!" I shrieked.

"What?" Lucifer pretended to be all innocent. "She gets here, you die, open the portal, she goes with you to the Pure Lands. She's all happy and healed, forgives you and fixes your blood problem. Isn't that great? Thank you Lucifer, yes yes."

I balked. "But I'm immortal. I can't die." And I wasn't sure I wanted to. Was it painful? Icky?

Lucifer smirked. They plucked a rhinestone off their dress and held it between us, where it shimmered. "Have some poison and find out."

I hesitated. The rhinestone was pushed towards me. "Do you want to kill yourself, or force Bella to do it for you? You're dying anyway."

I snatched the rhinestone from his grasp. Instantly it melted into my palm. I choked as it felt like a needle driving through me, straight up my arm and into my heart.

Faintly, I heard Lucifer's voice. "Don't forget -"

The floor crashed up to me. I barely felt it, my vision tunneling and ringing filling me.

My last thought was that I realized that, indeed, Bella hadn't given me an antidote as she promised. I felt cheated.

I opened my eyes to see a beautiful apparition. A lovely woman stood beside Lucifer, robed in deep red. She had such a smile on.

"Amitabha," said Lucifer as the goddess took me in her arms. I was nothing. Weightless. Just a little thought of existence.

The goddess nodded to Lucifer with a warm smile. Then, with respect and dignity, she turned around and walked through a small portal.

Most portals are crackling full of energy of the kind akin to the world they transfer to. This one was soft, and peaceful. As we slipped through it I felt blissful in a pure and healthy way. Calm. Complete.

We entered a world of light, lotuses by lakes, and sprawling fields. I knew the world as we stepped foot on the earth and she set me down. I floated from her. Stretching, I unfolded from myself.

All around me was beauty and peace. It felt amazing.

I turned to thank Amitabha- and saw the portal behind her. A hand was clawing through, a shoulder following. It was like an awful anti-birth. It was forceful, disgusting, and burning with callous irreverence.

Bella burst through with a roaring yell, burnt and bloodied by the energy of the portal. Her blue eye sparkled rabidly and she stumbled on her first steps on the Pure Lands.

Amitabha turned calmly to face her. She did not seem in the slightest bit surprised. "So you are here."

Bella laughed. "I've made it!" Her eyes rolled around her head to take it all in, but I somehow knew she couldn't see enough to actually understand this land. Her breath was ragged from anger and exertion. She laughed again, and it was frenzied.

Amitabha was nonplussed. I looked from one to the other, and it dawned on me as Bella drew a sword from her hip that she'd lied to me about one more thing.

"I'm finally going to kill you all!" she hissed. Dramatically, she pointed her sword at Amitabha. "I, Daughter of Mara, will destroy you stupid Buddhas!"

Amitabha watched with serene disaffection. I stepped forward. "But Bella, you can't-"

I knew this place was too peaceful. Too serene. Too precious to be allowed to be destroyed.

Bella knocked me aside. "I have defeated the supposed 'god of gods'. I have Lucifer as my minion, and-" she flicked a sneering wrist at me. "I've tamed Chaos. So," she took a deep breath then screamed to Amitabha "I'm going to kill you all!"

"No!" I said. "Bella, you said you wanted to save everyone! You can't do that if-"

"Snapshot! I lied! Now move aside, or rather -" and Bella's crazed gaze landed on me. "Help me, Chaos. Kill Amitabha for me."

"What?"

"Do it!" she screamed in my face. "Do it, and I will let you be my slave again! I will give you infinite pleasure, Chaos!"

Amitabha stepped forward. Serenely, she placed a hand on each our shoulders. She looked first at me, then at Bella. We both held our breaths.

With her exhale, a sense of peace infused through me. It soaked into me gently, destroying anger and hurt. I felt pure and true to myself. Connected to Amitabha, to Bella, to this land and all that dwelled in it-

With a groan Bella collapsed. Her sword fell to the ground. She clutched at her head, moaning. "It hurts, it hurts," she whimpered.

Of course, I realized. The destruction of ignorance and anger can be painful.

"It hurts!" Bella screamed. She staggered up to her feet, fingers having dug red marks down her cheeks. Eye rolling, she took one terrified look at Amitabha before lurching for the portal.

With a shriek, Bella fell into it as if all the hounds of hell were at her heels. Then there was silence.

For a moment, amitabha and I stood still. The wind blew around us, the grass swayed. I felt at peace. My mind, my spirit, felt on the brink of achieving something new. Enlightenment was only a grasp away, and I felt it.

But when I looked down, there was Bella's sword. I stooped down and picked it up.

"Pleasure is a blade," said Amitabha clearly. "It is fleeting, yet leaves marks of desire upon the soul."

I closed my eyes tightly. What did I want? Of course I wanted to stay here. But I also pitied Bella. She was pathetic, really. Lost. Helpless in her own way.

I opened my eyes, mind focused and clear. "I'm going to go get Bella," I said to Amitabha. "I'm going to heal her."

A pleased smile drew itself on her face. "To heal a demon and bring them to the Pure Lands is quite the challenge. Good luck, Chaos."

I smiled at my name, at the kindness with which is was pronounced. "Thanks."

Amitabha reached into a pocket of her robe. "I have a gift for you. A welcoming of sorts." And she held out a D20 dice to me. It rippled in swirls of red and gold. When it touched my palm I felt warmth within me, a little bit of Buddha-essence within myself.

As I held it up to the light, Amitabha spoke. "This dice is different from the one you had before. This one will not tell you whether you will defeat an enemy in battle, but your chances of healing their souls. Be prepared, your life is about to change."

I smiled as I pocketed it. "Thank you."

Amitabha bowed her head respectfully. "Best of luck. And beware of the sword you now carry with you. Pleasure is a double edged blade."

I looked down at Bella's sword. The weight of it was massive for its size. I felt it like a scorpion, deadly and latently poised to strike. To hold it was to perch on the edge of a blade. But I was ready to do just that.

Author's Note

Hi stranger! I really hope you enjoyed this novel. This story was inspired by a series of dreams I had, and I totally just ran with it. When I started, all I knew was that this teen called Chaos was getting picked up by a trucker on the side of a highway. The rest just grew from there. I loved writing this novel, and really hope that not only was it an enjoyable read, but that it also brings about some reflection on abusive relationships (especially within an LGBTQ+ setting) as well as the importance of mental health. It's always important to remember that abusive relationships come in all shapes, sizes, and genders.

And no, BDSM isn't bad (as will hopefully be revealed in part two, or maybe part three...), but a lack of communication is. Communication is a key component to proper BDSM, and the fact it is so lacking in Bella and Chaos' relationship is telling of the dynamics involved. Communication is also key to healthy relationships, by the way.

What about mental health? It's hard to communicate well when you're not in a good head space. As a survivor of chronic mental illness, I drew heavily upon my experiences of different states of mind in writing this novel. I really wanted to portray how powerless we can be when our mind is no longer ours, as well as how pleasure can be poisoned by what is causing it.

Most of the mythology in this novel is accurate, to the best of my knowledge (minus the grim reaper having a child!). Which means that yes, Yhwh was defeated by Kemosh in the old testament! Have fun researching that!

Lastly, I really would love to hear from you! I'd especially love to see any fanart/anything that this novel inspired in you, as well as feature you on my blog. So write to me, draw Chaos and Bella (or FoxFace!) and show it to me! Also, if you want to read the raw version of book two in the Chaos series, follow along on my blog, where I'll be posting it as I write!

Questions I'd love answered if you do write to me.

  * What was your favorite or most memorable part?

  * Who is your favorite character?

  * What themes did you notice in this book?

  * Are you excited for book two?

  * What are you hoping to see happen in book two?

  * What do you think of the major characters (Chaos, Bella, FoxFace, especially)?

Blog: https://unhingedandunenlightened.wordpress.com

Author's Smashwords page: <https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/TwoLoveBirds>

Facebook Reading Group: <https://www.facebook.com/groups/569454026857758/>

Author's Email: mdaoust245@gmail.com

Instagram: twolovebirds245

Twitter: mdaoust245

AO3 profile (I do fanfiction as well!): <https://archiveofourown.org/users/mdaoust245/profile>
