

The Three Appetites

#  Extract

### ...evil! Spoiled! Tainted! Perverted! Debased! Vitiated or morally degenerative money!"

### "This sermon must not be preached again! How can a senior pastor heedlessly call money evil when the bible calls it a solution to all things?" my five senses were reactively active. Then, she came and sat next to me as the last person to leave the hospital. March normally is a very cold month accompanied by rainfall patterns to mark a period where Kenya experiences heavy rainfall. Sitting next to Madam Alice however, cognizably raised my ambient temperature. My body became like hot coal inside a tea factory boiler. I wished I would have located my former seat. It was really getting uncomfortable.

### Pastor Nairobi called my attention at this moment.

### "Finally...

# COMMENTS

### I must say that this is thorough, first of its kind, contextual and will always be relevant. Everyone is a Richard at some point and at times all of their life, until we meet the life changing gospel freely given to us...

### This book is a call to awaken soldiers of the kingdom to remain focused on the course and diligently watch their conduct in this world with a view of the implications that it might have eternally.

Stanley Wandeto Ngari, iServe Africa

### The world is full of darkness, darkness that no earthy light can drive it. Every man is trapped in this darkness and we all looking for liberation. The tragedy is that our nature is comfortable in that state. Devil has deceived many by bringing the very message that massage our nature making us comfortable in that state. Thanks to God for we have Pst. Nairobi as remnants, who will attack our nature with the truth of the gospel and that's the only solution we have. We are all struggling with the three appetites of our nature. 99% of us will agree with me we are struggling and the other 1% are just lying they are not but they need help the more.

### Hey, am not intending to make you anxious but you can agree with me you are the Richard...........

Duncan njuguna, Proof reader

### The sweetness of this book's introduction pulled me across the lines and down the paragraph with momentum. No gravity could stop me until I was fully aware of Peter's mind. Let it be read all over the world.

Ndegwa Steve, Counsellor & Pastor

### Through God's inspiration, Eng. Peter Mungai Kagunya has called the body of Christ to realization of what can affect our welfare in all life aspects. In the illustrations of this book 'The Three Appetites', he has opened wide to us what we need to check to be an all-round Bride of Christ, that will be presented to the Father without blemish. This book will bring it's readers into the understanding of what is really eating us up in secret, what the cause is as well as the remedy. If you think you're standing, be careful lest you fall.

Miss Caroline Wanderi

Director Think One Coin Holdings Limited.

CONTENTS

#

Extract 2

COMMENTS 3

DEDICATION 6

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT 7

FOREWORD 8

S FOR WHAT? 11

CHAPTER ONE 12

M FOR WHAT? 23

CHAPTER TWO 24

CHAPTER THREE 34

CHAPTER FOUR 50

CHAPTER FIVE 63

F FOR WHAT? 80

CHAPTER SIX 81

EPILOGUE 117

#  DEDICATION

### In the vastness of space and immensity of time, it's with love to dedicate this book to the planet and specially to professionals in the political, economic and social umbrella. More specifically, any adult with a struggling turbulence in the area of sexuality, finances and partying will definitely be my guest.

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#  ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

### In brevity, I would like to honor these dear ones that made the book influence the world:

### 1. God who called me and forgave my sins when I confessed in 2007.

### 2. My parents, Mr. and Mrs. J. Kagunya with my kins who gave me immeasurable peace as I wrote this work.

### 3. My two editors Mr. Bill Clinton and Frank O. Tall B. Your sleepless nights is changing lives, I can't appreciate more.

### 4. My designer, A.M Kiama who made all graphics and brought the book into what many can emotionally relate and love.

### 5. All proof readers key amongst them being Dr. Mutinda from Africa Nazarine university, Cephas Ndegwa from FOCUS kenya, Mr. Wandeto from iServe Africa, pastor Ndegwa- a professional counsellor, Duncan njuguna from TOC holdings Ltd and Carol Wanderi from TOC.

### 6. My co-workers at TOC holdings: Board of trustees- prof. Araka, Dr. Mutinda, Mrs. Wairimu advocate at High court, Reverend mwanzia; board of directors- D. Njuguna, E. Wambui, Silas Kipkosgei, Chebet C, D. Maina, C. Wanderi, A. M.Kiama, Margaret W., And Douglas M.

### 7. Inspirers for their great advice, key among them being Bro. John ng'ang'a-the author of secret of contentment, Reverend James gikwa from deliverance church.

### 8. My friend Carol N. W. for her full contribution. On a fair ground, the book is authored by her but she allowed it to be mine.

#  FOREWORD

It was one Sunday morning, at around 7:30am, I was walking along one of the infamous streets in Nairobi City when I heard a high and rather squeaky voice say, 'handsome, ni cheap'. My eyes were quickly drawn to where the voice came from and to my chagrin, it was a harlot whose age from the façade was about that of my mother. With her makeup though, she seemed younger and more glamorous.

### After walking a couple of meters away, a husky man with a flabby tummy threw his arms around her waist and they both went up the stairs to where I'll leave you to guess.

### What on earth drives a woman to sell what was created for procreation? Again, what on earth drives a man to such a woman? Such are the questions that kept making rounds in my head that day. It was not until I read this book that I got a deeper understanding of what had really troubled my heart. I got to understand that I was no better than that man; only the mercies of God kept me from following that path. Indeed, the three appetites are all good stuff but when abused, they wreak havoc to what God made in six days. It's in light of this, that Peter makes a clarion call to all humanity through a very captivating story and invites all to be partakers of the grace of God made manifest through his son Jesus Christ.

### I pray that God uses it to redeem the lives of them lost in the dominion of darkness and at the same time help those who are standing to be more vigilant.

A

.M Kiama, Author, Living for Something

#  S FOR WHAT?

#

My name is Richard >>>>>>>>>>>>

CHAPTER ONE

### I entered the magnificent church for the fourth time this year, but this time the ushers had forgotten how important I was. Not even Carol with her endowed dimples was minding that my suit had a complexion only comparable to those of CNN TV anchors. The church banner at the gate had these writings in green:

Order of service

Morning glory: 6am to 7am.

Bible study: 7am to 9am.

Main service: 9am to 12pm.

### I never came in time for either morning glory or bible study. Rather, I always arrived at 11am and ensured that even the praise and worship session was either coming to an end or already ended.

### When I, disappointedly, saw that Carol didn't notice my landing that day, I chose a seat in the front as I thought: "who else could they be reserving the prestigious seats for?"

### As soon as I sat down, I drew my 'bible' out of my pocket as I waited for 'worshippers' to hurriedly finish conclusion prayers. They must have had an abnormal worship session that had blinded them from seeing 'men of importance', like me, come to church today.

### I then swiped my Samsung tablet and tapped on that APP that was only lucky on Sundays, yes, the bible APP.

### No sooner had I gotten tired of waiting for the session to come to an end than the angel in the white stood with his three inch wide hardcopy Bible. The pastor walked straight to the pulpit and with harmonized claps from the congregation, easily found himself smiling and simultaneously signaling them to sit down.

Pastor Nairobi was the senior pastor at Jesus paid it all church. This day his voice seemed coarse and he must have prayed for me so well. Maybe he must have prayed also for my house where some mistaken 'kunguni' (bed bugs) found residence last month.

"Greet your neighbor for me, ask them: where is your bible?"

As I waved to the lady sitting besides, I realized the pastor had not begun well. How could he forget to welcome visitors? I was sure he didn't find me in church the past week; or was he that blind failing to see my seat was empty and now God had graced them with my insurmountable presence! However, I uncomfortably and unsatisfyingly encouraged myself with a TOC (think one coin) quote : 'you cannot have a baby next month by impregnating nine women today. Warren Buffet was right and I needed patience, maybe I would be welcomed last to salute my hungry church. The congregation must have missed 'salamu zangu' (my greetings).

"I hope your week was well, and as you can tell, my wife, Mrs. Nairobi here, and I, have missed you so much." The pastor continued. "Today being the third Sunday of the month, 15th march 2020, I am happy to bring the word of God to us. As I was praying this week and in the mid- week service, the lord revealed to me three indelible things that in the next three weeks, or rather three consecutive Sundays will amaze you, starting from today".

### The youth pastor had not mentioned to me that there were mid-week services all the times when he shamefacedly telephoned me, when he was 'praying' for my financial support. The pastor would have at least honored me with a request to type his preaching. This would have made the message more appealing rather than traditionally using papers, most likely torn from an exercise book.

"For those who are writing, the message of today is entitled: Give unto me and I will give unto you! Shake your neighbor and tell him or her: 'ujumbe Ni... nipe nitakuregeshea! Hallelujah".

### As the disorderly yet important congregants furiously shook their so called neighbors, and more so agreeably shouted the title of the message, all I noticed about the pastor was how high he jumped that day. Before he could calm down, the message had overwhelmed not only his voice but also his whole body. He was a 'pastor' and most notably so, in the big city.

"After I got the message, I shared it with my wife yesterday, she confirmed that Yahweh wanted not only the church but the whole world to hear and heed. She added that if the title could be 'THE THREE APPETITES' then all the men, women and most importantly the youths could never remain the same again. I will, each Sunday, according to her advice share part of the message. I welcome my wife to greet us and partly introduce the message, karibu Mrs. Mchungaji (welcome my wife)."

### I admired Mrs. Nairobi's oration prowess. She was not audible enough but with the aid of the mic her words were married in intonation, articulation and quotients. God must have really endowed her with knowledge and understanding of all kinds of literature and learning.

### Her presence in the life of the stammering pastor assuredly completed him. She actually was the right person to introduce the preaching, and so she finely got to the front and held the red microphone. The color went well with her 'kitenge' (African dress). Standing fashionably she said:

"Praise God church? Today I am full of God as I greet all of us in the name of Jesus our Lord. You well know, normally my standing here would certainly be accompanied by many scripture quotations, not to mention the words of encouragement. On the contrary, today I and my handsome priest, that's after God spoke to us, we are very eager to let us know something. To let us understand that only three things can bring a man down forever, and the woman too. Praise God! I have never disagreed with my pastor but this day I consider to lovingly do that" she said with a smile.

"Without further ado I'd like to welcome my husband to bring us the word for today, 'karibu; tumpigie makofi ya juu!" (Let's welcome him with claps). The pastor rushed forth.

"The first and fastest thing that would bring a man down is a three letter word. Somebody say SEX. Hallelujah!"

This was probably the first time the members of Jesus paid it all church were told to repeat the words of the anointed man and willingly choose to remain silent like a grave. Personally I thought it was amusing. I found myself obedient and immediately shouted the word. As those who heard my voice gave me a worrying look, I traded my confidence over cowardice and unswervingly fixed my eyes on the pastor; after all, he once told us that obedience is better than sacrifice.

"There are three things that God told me that most of you need deliverance from. They have twisted and bound most Christians. In a country popularly and globally known to be 80% Christian, approximately 70 percent, the reality is that the devil tricked us and somehow won in these three things. And you heard me right, one of them is sex. Sex outside marriage is a sin that is professionally advocated from hell. I must tell you this: youths begin to climb this tree with just a hug. At this time you may think the lady is a hot cooking pan, the boy just quickly touches and releases her. Then they climb higher with a prolonged hug and before they can comprehend what is going on, their consciences are lost and gone, there they are, coming to church and shamelessly...."

### I couldn't concentrate. I was worriedly sitting with my mind confused. I was shivering heavily, sweat flowed freely down my spine. "Was I rotten too?" I recalled my tasty date last Sunday with Melisa. How I enjoyed her company in the arboretum for the first time without anyone else to infringe on our freedom. But no! No! And NO! Everyone must have been inside the church that morning, after all, all Sundays are Sabbaths and should be kept holy. No one saw such unholy thing" I thought to myself as I returned slowly to my consciousness.

"The word of God is clearer on these things",

### His eyes circumnavigated the whole church in seconds but more often than not they grew bigger when they saw my presence. I began to feel uncomfortable. So I gazed at the pastor like nothing was happening.

"As I finish, one lawyer who later changed his profession once said: all sin that a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.A'Bwana asifiwe!' (Praise the lord). I consider not to make an altar call this day because all of us, we are in a boat that we must consider jumping into the sea and being swallowed by a fish like Jonah, if only to get to where God wants us to beB. If Jesus were to come back now, would he say to you: come and share in your master's happiness as a faithful servant or would he liken you with the third servant and say: throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth?"C

### That question seemed more directed to me. My mind was right to see him as one who drew his bow and made me the target for his arrows. He pierced my heart with arrows from his quiver. 'Would I become the laughing stock of all these people? Would I end up a byword and an object of ridicule?'

### That day I don't remember giving my tithes and offerings. The only thing I recall is how quickly I got into my Toyota after few greetings and drove fast home.

### As I parked in my landlord's lot, I rang Melisa.

"Hello there! I got two questions Na! Answer me now and if you lie 'nakuacha' (I will break up with you). Did you share with anyone about our date last Sunday? And two; does my pastor know? 'mundu mugi ndari mihere ya uhoro' (a wise person doesn't need explanations)."

Melisa humbly and most genuinely answered me in a coaxing voice that left me manufacturing peace for export: "love I didn't share with anyone issues 'za' date. (matters relating our date). Also when I came to your church, as a visitor in the reception we only shared two issues; if we were born again and if we would consider fully being part of the church. I told them I am a guest from the village and that I had only visited the city once, then I'd go back home. Nothing else Richie."

### I was ready to ship the peace she restored in my heart.

### The pastor maybe was only sharing a normal message. A message like the one he preached the first time in January as I landed at that church for the first time, and I remember him say:

### "Praise God! Praise God church! I can't hear you, praise jesussss..! I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you. Receive your blessings! Receive your house! Receive your car! Receive your wife! Receive your husband! You will prosper like me. I came to this city when my name was pastor Ndondo. When I understood how God changed the name of Jacob to Israel, I changed my name to pastor Nairobi. God will change your name today in the name of....."

### And there we were, standing and shouting hallelujatic Amen as we received what each one of us desired. All of us were so full of energy. Giving that day was 'voluntary'. I was so moved and felt like opening my own church only that I feared being rebellious. Knowing the sin of rebellion is likened to witchcraft, I had no calling.

### But this time he seemed to prophesy what no one could receive with the conventional Amen.

### Monday was a good day to start-off my week. This is especially with my colleague, the lady who got me my first and only car after I joined her company. Of course I serviced her with what she required before she could 'bless' me with a faster means of transport than the normal train. The machine that I used to intimidate the church and the village whenever I was around.

### On the contrary this day, madam who was also a member of our church didn't like my good morning greetings. She nodded at me to immediately start supervising the hotel workers and ensure all is well in my jurisdiction. That day as well as the whole week, I managed work with the least possible amount of conversations. Neither did Madam Alice modify her moods. Actually, when her husband paid the usual work visits, she seemingly liked him more than me. This disappointed me and jealously brought me a guilt-ridden sensation.

Many happenings in the country didn't appear sensible nor reasonable to my conscience, including the somehow shocking news cautioning that Kenya had recorded the first case of coronavirus. All that my cubic mind could contain was the tragic preaching. Pastor as a tragedian writer had turned my whole life into mood swings. The only other thing that sometimes occupied my mind was the new vocabularies: Social Distancing... which I could now exercise even with Madam.

### Melisa my girlfriend had also noticed my sudden behavioristic change. Days were dashing with minimum exchange of words of love or any acts of love for that matter.

### On Saturday evening I barely slept as I desired to hear what the pastor had prepared for us the following morning. I couldn't wait.

#  M FOR WHAT?

#  CHAPTER TWO

My name is Richard >>>>>>>>>>>>

### Different from other Sundays, there was what seemed like a waste of natural resources in the temple of the water of life. Water tanks were making un-natural black spots. The spots were not only obstructing the monumental banner, but also their numerosity was hindering the ease of entering the church with praise. Coronavirus had brought new regulations. Rules of outer cleanliness to the church, which only knew cleanliness of the heart.

However, after alighting, I washed my hands and did what made even grandparents laugh as they muttered: 'umesanitize?' (Have you used a sanitizer)? Many saints believed that the virus is so weak and would die if a sanitizer liquid was applied on their hands. Others even smeared it on their faces, I was disgusted but I held my peace in the house of the peace-loving God.

### As I proceeded inside the sanctuary, carol welcomed me though this day she was about one meter away. Social distancing was dreaded even by church ushers whom I thought God always protected through prayers of my pastor. The seating arrangement was funny, obeying the government guidelines too. Abnormally, no one escorted me to the front chair again, but this time the blame was on my government, and that made me feel at ease.

### As I sat down I confirmed from the hanging old timepiece, it was 10 O'clock when the praise and worship leaders rose to go to the pulpit. As Joyce the legendary church anchor led in those tuneful songs, we all enjoyed the dance in African ways more than the songs themselves. For me however, as a respected church tither and a philanthropic giver, I had to sing with moderation and worship with my hands in the pocket. Small moves while keeping my eyes open was a normality that kept my ego high like an eagle. 'Why should I be proud?' I considered shouting thanks in worship as pride. My scriptures told me to be humble if I needed God to exalt me; no need to show off what I had by thanking God in the presence of the poor as some members were. In a moment, their words finally came to an end with the praise team cut-short by the senior pastor.

### "Greeting your neighbor today will not be the right thing to do. We are to take care of humanity as Christians. Obedience is also in line with the scriptures." He began after allowing us to sit.

### "Nevertheless, in the church the word of God will continue! Shout hallelujah!"

### My desire wasn't to shout harmoniously with the crowd. It was to hear the next version. 'What is the second thing?' I thought as I placed my digital bible on the front table-arm.

### 'This is the second service since I began to teach on the topic: please give me, I will give it to you, or if you like: The three appetites. I believe God has convinced you through the past week."

### As the church continued to listen, my mind was busy and momentarily thinking: "would he by any chance ask for an altar call? What if he does? I can go but I can't. That would downplay my splendor." But this tossing of waves in the sea of my mind was calmed down by what he said next.

"But, I will give you more time and will make an altar call the coming Sunday if God wills. Allow me to get straight into the second thing whose appetite must be controlled. All of us like this monster, with only a few knowing how to control the love of it. It has many AKAs but I will call it by its original name. MONEY!

Today the 22nd of March 2020, I see people who are 'alive' in church. I thought I am always right but God tells me this is a grave church. After Jesus paid it all you think with money you can pay your way to heaven! Oh to you who are rich! It is easy for a camel to get through an eye of a needle than you to heaven.D This is an appetite that has continued to destroy our city. Why does money laundering exist? Why is this country shamelessly one of the most corrupt countries in the world? Why do some have sugar mommies and sugar daddies who give you more than what you...?"

### I hardly heard more when he mentioned sugar mommies. I looked left to where she used to sit and our eyes met like two cars preparing for an accident.

### "God! Doesn't the pastor care that we could leave this church and tithe elsewhere? Does he not mind living in debts?" I concernedly thought.

### "We should live in love and not leave our homes for love, young men and your so called sponsors hear what God is saying!" swiftly, the pastor caught my attention.

### Madam Alice was evidently crying beside her oblivious husband. If only she could contain herself and stop shedding crocodile tears, then I could also feel at ease, but she didn't. I wondered what would happen if Mr. Hitler knew about his sly wife's tears. I dreaded him, not that he was her husband but that he was the head of a horrid department. As my eyes were 'leaving' his presence, I got into a brief trance, a meditation of what would really happen if he even thought of it. One needed no experience for full consequential interpretation. I already had one experience to realize the poison in the fangs of an angry CID.

### In 1999, exactly 21 years ago, I was a student in lower primary. Kinuthia used to call me Lizard as R in my name 'chameleonized' to L. His pronunciation contrasted what I had been taught earlier on, "Could my nursery school teacher have lied to me?" Kinuthia was so bright and as a classmate, he could hardly fail in anything and I also thought he was more right to correct others. One time, I thought to myself: "the reason I fail in exams must be because of how I spell my name." I decided to improve and write it well, this time in the worst scored paper- mathematics. One week after the end term exams, the mathematics teacher brought the results. As the cane was tightly held in his hand, he called out to the one who wrote his name as L.I.Z.A.R and before he could shout D, I was friskily walking towards the front. 'Ugali' (as we nicknamed the teacher) had a sure custom of congratulating the most improved students first before caning those who would fail- the ones he called Ugali. But, this time he decided to call the ugali students first, and there I was: the prince who only knew how to eat ugali, king of madness. The beating that day left a legacy on my body and I consider it safer not to mention which part specifically, but when I sit down I always commemorate.

"God will punish you if you don't repent. You and your money will perish. One ruler came to Jesus and asked him: "good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?" and He replied: "why do you call me good? No one is good- except God alone. You know the commandments: do not commit murder, do not steal, and do not give false testimony, honor you father and mother" and the ruler said he had kept all these. Jesus then uttered to him: "You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come and follow me." EWhen the ruler heard this, he became very sad, that's simply because he was very rich. Brothers and sisters, beloved of God, I beseech you to go and..."

### The church service was stopped for a moment. What I didn't expect to occur, actually happened. We were all fearlessly violating the government rule and rushed to the scene. The CID had yelled a horrific yet short-term cry before he fell in prostration. He was the best tither in both dry and wet seasons. Consequently, everyone including Mrs. Nairobi ran like a new ambulance on road test to his rescue.

### Alice and I were not really helping him. We looked to one another with tears flowing like water. Many would have thought we pitied Mr. Hitler, but we feigned our reasons in remorseful tears. As Mr. Hitler fainted, our strength ebbed away under his weight. We needed a lot of help to lift him.

### We took him to the church sanatorium where we allowed the nurses to attend to him. Elder Ruto in delegation summoned all the ushers to help in assembling us back to the church. The pastor was immovably waiting for an audience to finish his sermon. "This preaching must be doing more harm to him than good", I thought to myself while righteously walking to the front. This time I mistakenly found myself comfortably yet thoughtlessly sitting where Mr. Hitler sat before.

### "As I was saying before the unfortunate thing happened, I command you to go and sell what you have acquired in dubious ways. Do not try to come to this church and give money obtained through evil! Spoiled! Tainted! Perverted! Debased! Vitiated or morally degenerative money!"

### "This sermon must not be preached again! How can a senior pastor heedlessly call money evil when the bible calls it a solution to all things?" my five senses were reactively active. Then, she came and sat next to me as the last person to leave the hospital. March normally is a very cold month accompanied by rainfall patterns to mark a period where Kenya experiences heavy rainfall. Sitting next to Madam Alice however, cognizably raised my ambient temperature. My body became like hot coal inside a tea factory boiler. I wished I would have located my former seat. It was really getting uncomfortable.

### Pastor Nairobi called my attention at this moment.

"Finally, the love of money is the root of all evil. If you don't control yourself from its love, you will do anything you can to get money. Without accountability, the liberty to do anything we want gradually becomes a desire to do everything we don't want. These words from one Kenyan horticulturalist sums up my message. Through this week, sit down with yourself, genuinely record all your wealth and later hyphenate each with its source. If it's your bank money, how did you earn it? If it's your job, how did you get it? If it's your land, again how did you get it? If it's your car how did you..."

### Madam Alice slowly looked at me, this time the chairs had allowed informal deregulations and she tapped me and whispered: "Richard, are you feeling what I am feeling. Are you?"

### "Yes, but can we talk tomorrow at our workplace, I am feeling sorry for your husband who is sick." I changed the tonic direction of the conversation. I had to avoid an incidence where we would go for an emergency altar call, before the prophesied time.

### As a result, we 'took' our attention back to the preacher.

"Don't you know not that we are in terrible times, times where people are lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure than lovers of God—having a form of godliness but denying its power,F from today, I will have nothing to do with such people! Lastly, I will lie to you if I remain silent on this: go sell all you have stolen, give the money to the poor and come and follow Jesus the bread of life. Let's pray and meet next Sunday for the last segment of this topic, if God wills. Close your eyes. Now heavenly father, God of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Nairobi, Jehovah Jireh Jehovah Nissi..."

The pastor prayed so long and before he could truly finish, I was driving fast along the best and only superhighway. Thanks to the third president of Kenya. I imagined if his convoy met me driving on the red lane that day. The only sure thing he could tell his deputy was maybe: "huyo dereva ni kubafu sana! Bure kabisa! (That driver is very mad, he can't be helped).

As I drove past the underpass, I couldn't imagine how it would be if Madam Alice asked back for the car she had proudly gifted me. After all I had pricelessly gifted her too. Whilst hooting at the gate, I remembered a proverb in Swahili language. And before I could park the car abnormally, I audibly said to the surroundings: "Yaliyopita si ndwele, tugange yajayo" (a past matter isn't a pandemic, our focus should be the future).

### My heart and head were heavy with fears of the unknown. As I pushed the door of my house open I reluctantly desired one thing. I wished I hadn't showed up in church. I was furiously angry with everything in my house, kicked those utensils out of my way to the study room. I looked myself in the mirror. Suddenly, my face turned pale and I was so frightened that my knees knocked together and my legs gave way. In my confusion I immediately wrote what I was thinking. I wrote a promise that I wasn't sure I would keep. The red marker like a finger wrote the seven word sentence:

### I WILL NEVER GO TO CHURCH AGAIN

#  CHAPTER THREE

### Regardless of the inward incredulity, I had to slowly but surely open my eyes that morning. It was yet another day, the day that the Lord had made that we may be glad and rejoice in Him. Monday morning 6:30 am, I was ready to drive to work. I worked in one of the high ranking and prestigious 5 star hotel. City dwellers made it so busy at all times due to its delicacies and its advantageous location inside the city square. Most politicians too would surely not miss after their parliamentary proceedings. However, they ordered meals that later could be taken with other friends, mostly not of the same gender or relation. If only I were not like them, I would be giving them templates with quotes such as this one by Eng. A. M. Kiama who said: political dichotomy posited by many partisans as allegiance, has sired servitude, antipathy and animosity in our nation, which is not agathokakological as many claim. It's a wellspring of evil as killers of peaceful coexistence are manufactured at its core.

### As I went inside the main office, I realized the hotel wasn't opened, but couldn't call to ask the boss. That was the last thing to do to her at such times lest I be monetarily dislodged by the treasurer. The office being closed till 7:30 am was very unusual. No sooner had I contemplated on the matter than the secretary came in and hurriedly, after realizing I was there, ran and opened the 'public square'. The day was now ready to begin unfolding its hidden treasures.

### The hotel however wasn't on public domain this day. Very few customers came even to order their normal office breakfast. The place was scary with silence. This concerned me so much and as the second in command I felt like going to the market and calling beggars to come and make merry, at least for them it was assured they needed food, only that they had no power to acquire it.

### Madam Alice came later in the day, called us all at exactly 4pm at the fire assembly. As I proceeded there, my eyes were zooming the seven different flags that portrayed our dominion in this industry. However, the news she was bringing was so sad. The economy had birthed stinginess without so much as a warning. The new era was one full of unexpected hopelessness. Everyone seemed to guess what would be said. We funereally stood on the levelled kikuyu grass as Kazungu- the hotel engineer- prayed and ushered Madam her mantle.

### "Good evening everyone?" she began.

"From our headquarters in San Francisco, America and as your manager in this hotel, I have the following remarks to put across:

### First, as all of you are aware, two months ago, a deadly virus affecting humans broke out from Wuhan, China. The virus was first known as severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 of the genus Beta-coronavirus, abbreviated as SARS-COV-2. This was so because it was first reported in animals, then got to another animal and lastly ended in the intelligent 'animals'- human beings."

### This kind of lecture was last offered to me when I sat for my university chemistry exam in 2011. This was when the lecturer gave handouts in the beginning of the semester, went missing as he toured the world but came back at the end of the semester with a similar deadly virus. ASSIGNMENTS PLUS CATS PLUS MAIN EXAM, all these to be completed in one week time. As a so called Christian union leader and icon for many sisters and few brothers who didn't mind my character, I did something, something enough to pass the fail marks. I couldn't help but 'be assisted' by Odinga, the brightest student then. Later I would repent naively to one 'understanding' Christian union associate. Mrs. Graham who then worked with the best and biggest Christian Union organization in Kenya called FOCUS (fellowship of Christian unions). She would always warn me by quoting from the words of Jeff Durbin: 'Attempting to reform society without Jesus Christ is like rearranging furniture in a burning house.' I would feel guilty for one week and when we met again I felt sinfully refreshed, a fountain of fecundity. Irrespective of the evil means, I had passed the chemistry exam and Madam Alice's lecture couldn't threaten me either.

### "This pandemic has caused many deaths notably in countries like Italy, Spain, France, and who can tell, Kenya may be next, we now have 16 confirmed covid-19 cases. You may say that there are no deaths but no one can tell if they will be among the statistical deaths that may be reported. Our headquarters therefore resolved to protect us. As a result, I am sorry to read out the names of some of us who are today being laid off from work until further notice. And kindly note that the leave is not a salaried one. If your name isn't in the list it means you are retained but with half the salary and working hours."

### As she read out the names, 125 workmates were laid off that day, they walked sluggishly to pick their belongings from their offices. Their faces and silence could make anyone shed tears but I didn't. Thank God Mrs. Chakula, was not in the list. Her real name was different but we loved the nickname. She was highly respected in the hotel as the best cook. Madam and I loved to eat the works of her hands. It was exceptional. Pizzas were truly nameable only if she cooked them. We also in many occasions partied on any food remains as long as it was preserved by her. I thought to myself that the ones being laid off could have challenged the matter in court if she were laid off with them. The only problem if that happened could be that the defendant would also be the plaintiff and the judge.

### Soon, madam and I were the only ones left standing in the assembly. I hardly noticed her until she called out:

### "Richard! You mean since I dismissed the meeting three minutes ago you can't hear me calling you?" she exclaimed in a dismayed spirit as I quickly apologized.

### "I know we, I mean me-Alice and you Richard, we have been doing a lot, and like the pastor said, we have to sell what we gained wrongly and give the money to the poor. I want you to give me the keys to my car!!!!!!" she stutteringly spoke her demands as I quickly apologized.

### "Please no, please no, I am sorry, forgive me, I will do anything you want but please let me keep the car, please I beg you"

### I recall how I easily yet confidently I knelt down before her 'unfailing' mercy. Then I pleaded with her with unending and unplanned apologetic phrases. She lifted me up and directed me to go and solve the matter inside her car.

### As I honorably and carefully opened the back right door, she threatened more my already uneasy presence. She banged the back left door and closed the war room without a referee. I was sure to receive the first fist, and mostly die or at best resurrect at her mercy. All fans seemed to cheer her, promising that the battle is already won. Victory belonged to her alone.

### She gazed at me straight for a minute. I felt like that was the 'unknown hour'. She couldn't blink until she opened her mouth to separate her 'red' lips. Before I could allow her to torment me, I continued the next plea episode:

### "Please Alice",

### It was very normal to call her that, especially when we were alone.

### "Please before you pass your rightful judgement, tell me, how is your husband? Does he know what we once did it?"

### That was an intellectual way to plead for mercy but also guiltily cause her to serve me justly. I was suffering in my own third world but I had to change the mentality and evade some measurable amounts of pain. I learnt this from TOC quotes as one Professor Lumumba said: third world is a state of mind and until we change our attitude as Africans, if there is a fourth, fifth and even sixth world, we will be in it. I had to act very slyly to cause her to abandon her ghastly plans.

### "Richie I want you to listen and listen carefully. Since you came to this company, my husband has been complaining about how I no longer pick my children from school as I used to. In response and to protect you, I always tell him how the work has become too demanding, but both you and me, and probably the pastor knows what always happens, what you daily do to me whenever we feel those spasmodic drives."

### "Wait," I interrupted her. "Did you mention the pastor too? Tell me you haven't ruined my young vivacious life. You well know that the pastor knows my girlfriend and my parents so well. Why did you do this to me? To destroy my life when am faithfully keeping secrets in order to protect you? Why Alice?"

### She then held my right hand, but this time her hand was very rough, unromantic and unusual. She rubbed me and silently said:

"Tulia (be calm). I did not mention that I informed him. The only reason I presume he knows is connected with his recent sermons. Have you realized how powerfully and authoritatively he is doing them, a sermon that is dividing the spirit and the marrow? I think God is real my dear, and if he is then, I also believe He reveals mysteries and secrets like ours. Why I saw it fitting that we talk it over in the car is to let you know one thing, I have all along been acting in ignorance and arrogance. When I saw you as an ambitious young man last year, I noticed you must be in need of wealth, I knew a car would make you my man at work, I missed sexual satisfaction but was not sure if my trap would work. One day I promised to call you into my office on a Friday 21st in June 2019, do you recall what happened Richie?"

### Of course I could hardly forget the first day that marked a total life transformation. That day when she requested me for a short evening meeting after work only to find the meeting a two edged sword, with two participants only. No one was absent with or without apology.

### The boss turned out in the day to be the chairperson of the smallest company meeting ever recorded before corona virus outbreak. There I was as both the secretary and the present member.

### Then I recalled how she began the meeting as we were seated on one black leather coach:

### "Which car have you ever dreamt of?" to that I answered.

### "Any car is good, but Madam, why are you asking?" and she continued with the first agenda.

### "I fear that your work will go unrewarded if I exit this company. I therefore decided with love that out of my savings, I will reward your hard work. I have decided to promote you to be my assistant from today so that we can assist each other achieve the goal of this company. In line with that, my assistant can't be poor, especially one as handsome as you. Take these keys, there is a light-grey Toyota Prado just adjacent to my parking lot, it is waiting for you. I trust that you know how to drive darling, am I right?

### The question seemed to implore me to answer, to admit to my driving skills was not the issue, of course she had seen the driving license during the application for the post of a driver as the first job I applied for. Moreover, the word DARLING! Was so new to me, I felt something, something beyond explanation. The word flowed to my mind, found no rest and contagiously begun to affect the other parts of my body. The third law of Newton's was being authenticated- to every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I was numb and dumb, looking down wordlessly not to hurt my boss or do anything stupid, lest I be a 'mshamba' (stupidly naive) or lose my first job. When she realized I was unpromisingly silent, she decided to help me appreciate that she was the angel here. She then squeezed herself nearer as I restrained the feeling to scream. I had to look at her in preparation for any warning. My left eye hesitantly viewed the red strips of her brassieres, as the right appreciated the exposed brown thighs. With lustful innuendos she said: "fear not, I am with you, your boss, you'll lack nothing if you trust me" she proceeded to direct my reluctant hands around her unzipped dress and then, I don't know how she succeeded to win my trust and in a minute made my body her temple.

### In the car I thereby answered:

### "I remember very well, and also feel totally sorry for violating your body, the body which is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Please talk to God and forgive me."

### I was deeply oppressed, a sinner of the lineage of Sodom and the clan of Gomorrah. She sobbed too with tears dripping down her cheeks like a waterfall. Then she contained herself and said to me:

"Richard we both have sinned and gone short of the glory of God.G I am beginning to believe that we are more than common Kenyan harlots. But I want to go back to God, only that I don't know if you can first forgive me. If so please tell me"

### The devil at that time whispered swiftly to my listening mind. He reminded me of the car I had and cautioned of the consequences. I knew what that meant. How the community would recite me as an example of bad things, the man who rose in wealth but then fell like lightening to poverty. I felt the devil was making a lot of sense in his unseen conversations. But I came back to the land of the living and questioned Alice:

### "What did you conclude about the car, are you taking it now?"

### I had no problem leaving my sins. I only had a problem leaving the privileges of our old sins. I was somehow sure she could forgive me and forget about it.

### "I am confiscating it. I have to sell it and give the money to the poor. But don't worry, Dr. Trump, the owner of our company sent something to me and you, the Kenyan leaders. Here is a stipend for you to use during these corona times. It is just a cheque of $ 100,000 US dollars, you can maybe use it to buy you and Melisa a..."

### "Wah! Wah! Wah! ..." I jubilantly interrupted her as I received the cheque in exchange for the car keys before she could finish her statements.

### "Richard! Richard! Richard! Please this is nothing compared to what Jesus did."

### I retaliated "Pardon me, what did Jesus do in this situation now?"

But she persuaded me immediately to kneel. Then she said, "Jesus paid it all. Even though our sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow, though they are red as crimson, He will make them as wool.H

Let's consider mending our ways. This cheque is just money which will one time be used up. The wealth then will be in the hands of new generations we don't well know about, but our lives do not need to be checkered. Do you want to live like sheep without a shepherd? IDo you want to die, be forgotten on earth, rejected in heaven and only wait to burn in hell? The bible speaks infallibly, and I believe it can never lie, my destiny and your eternity are all on a compass, going to hell but with a chance to revolve. For me to change direction and travel safely, I want you, I need you to forgive me my sins. Be brave and tell me you have accorded me forgiveness. Then regard me from now on as your mother. Please! Please!"

### "Yes mom", I said. "I have fully forgiven you, I kneel down to request for yours too. I feel we are not worthy nor deservingly worthy to pray for each other. We are blinded sinners! How can one blind man lead another, both will fall into a pit. Why don't we simply forgive each other? Then we can plan to go and be prayed for by the pastor. I suggest that this coming Sunday we get to church very early and confess to him. Maybe we can get the peace he says they always have in his family.

### Mom agreed to this angelic revelation. I just hoped that the zeal to do good will not evaporate. We then helped each other to rise from the humbling postures.

### When we remotely lowered the quarter glass, eventide was ushering the close of the day. 'How could these few minutes turn into hours?' We both looked at each other without a word. If we didn't come to a conclusion soon the devil would have changed the story again. I missed to hug her goodbye but we both knew what it could lead to, so we restrained ourselves. I left her in the car and went straight to search for a means of transport. She waved me goodbye as she worriedly prepared to drive home.

### It was already 10 minutes to 10pm in the night. This night wasn't normal, I could tell from the look of things. I searched all over the station and found no public bus. I couldn't dream of myself ever again using 'public transport'. I had fully forgotten the words of the father of Pentecostalism in Nigeria arch bishop A.B. IDAHOSA: cleverness takes you up but integrity keeps you there. I loitered for one hour then got tired and stopped.

### Nairobi normally is a very busy city especially at night. This time however, no vehicle was in sight, I felt humiliated and wished I had pleaded to use madam's gift one last time. Suddenly, I saw a news anchor that was well known for her dexterous abilities in reporting the news in both English and Swahili languages at royal media services TV station. She was holding the wireless microphone and was giving some speech, I couldn't tell if they were explanatory breaking news or the opposite. It was not long before she stopped and faced my direction. As she cautiously ran to me, I hopefully went closer. I yearned for some pure firsthand information. There she stood, my TV, live and alive.

### "What are you doing here at this time of night? Didn't you hear that the central business district will be police controlled for fumigation against Corona? No one except the police are lawfully allowed to be outside, and of course those offering essential services. Are you listening?"

### She noticed that I was uneasy. I was having mild but exponential breathing asphyxia. I had recalled the paper treasure I had in my black bag. This brought painful pride and confused relaxation. What would happen if those brutal police officers got me in a cell to spend the night there with hooligans? It would be dreadful to lose the cheque. It was all I got in life. We saw a police helicopter hovering towards our direction and we got under a shade.

### I had surely not heard the news, and not only I, Madam must have also been sailing in the same storm.

### Without much notice to the events succession, I found myself on Tuesday morning pleading with the police together with madam Alice. We pleaded to be released from jail, we didn't intentionally get ourselves arrested. We honestly didn't know a curfew would one morning humiliate our pride. We bribed our way out and headed to our tenement houses to change and rush to work. Bribing that day was the last 'inevitable' sin. When we met back at work, we confessed the haram as a misdeed to God and added it to the list. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and a part of Thursday was a time to window-shop for another car, but most of the cars I saw were not my type. I desired to buy one that Melisa would embrace along with me.

#  CHAPTER FOUR

Melisa on Friday gave me a call. She had a lot to complain about. All the noise was pointing to one big problem- how uncommitted I had recently become in the relationship. She questioned what we were still waiting for, what on earth made me keep her as just a girl who is a friend for so long. Knowing what this meant, I did the normal thing and waited. In a few minutes I was sure she saw the code OA0231622RD. This most common way of sending money in Kenya is known to make any gold-digger remain calm like a two-year-old girl on the palms of her mother, binding to the soul. This time though, Melisa opened her eyes. I got a refund code; OA0231623RD, meaning that she had wired back the money. I knew my tricks had hit a dead end. My quiver had no more arrows left. I noticed the speed with which she had refunded. It was so fast notably with the codes having a difference of just one roman. SAFARICOM the better option must have had very few transactions within that time, I bet.

### She gave me a call again on Saturday morning and informed me of her plan to come to the city. Of course the only place she knew in Nairobi was my house. Her plans required no suggestions, she was the lead. She made me see the truth in the quote: leaders are not suggestions to solutions but solutions to suggestions. I was agitated of what would happen with her on the driver's seat as the problem solver. In a hurry I cleaned the dirty compound and later the utensils. I made everything twinkling clean and prepared her uncommon meal. I also shuffled the cards. This was the best game I had taught her recently and she liked it like the teacher. I sat and waited for her patiently yet worriedly.

### As Melisa knocked the door, I welcomed her so lovely but upon widely opening my arms I got a hug shock. She was so composed and uninterested. She went straight to the kitchen, uninvited, served herself and then called me for a meeting. As she stewed the pancakes with chicken, I noticed the pride with which she feasted the delicacy. The food was hot but that did not stop her from gobbling it up. After a deep sigh, she placed the food on the sofa. It was evident she wanted me to explain something without a definition. Without waiting for the go ahead, I went on.

### "Melisa I like you, you know it, furthermore, I will never do anything to annoy or hurt you. You are the rose of my life when other flowers are fading, the angel of my heart, when the earths demons take charge. If I have wronged, in any way, I am sorry. I would rather be a letter in your life than be a paragraph in another girl's life. I mean, you are the sanitizer of..."

### "Nyenyenye nye..." she suddenly stole my confidence, silenced me and gave me a warning if I could interrupt her when she talked. There and then I saw a typical 'kikuyu' woman. Or so the society the defined them to be

I had always believed that all you needed to win a kikuyu girl, is 'mbeca' (money). It was a lie after all. She went ahead, faked a smile and asked:

"What is my second name? Answer me now."

### This time round she asked with a calmness that was not easy to cope up with. What a question was she asking? I feared her unspoken words than the spoken. I inwardly regretted my fourth year at Nyeri University." If I totally didn't go even to that campus, maybe I would not have loitered in the villages which rewarded my idleness with Nduta. Now, a girl without a degree is belittling me. What if she even had a college certificate? Wouldn't she be clobbering me in my house?" But my time was running out and I had to answer her.

"Si unaitwa Nduta!

### (is your name not Nduta?)

### She nodded and stood up like a palm tree in the still weather. She then leaned over the table. Facing me for a silent minute worked against my self-control. She made me do the act I once did in the church. I excused myself to the toilet and on coming back I didn't find her. I hurriedly went out smelling her presence like the sniffer dogs but the scent was long gone. She was not there.

### I went back to the house and on cleaning the table, I noticed a small piece of white paper inside the remains of her food. I was about to throw it away when I noticed minute writings on it. The two words must have been prepared intentionally before she came into the city. This drew all my attention. I went for a cup of water sat down and tried to synthesis what I read before I could interpret.

### My phone interrupted.

"Babe, it is Melisa."

### I received the call waiting for an explanation rather than a break-up festival. The two words on the paper were a mystery, more than a puzzle, something that left me more passionate to pay any amount to interpret and help my struggling psychology.

"You have been lying to me all this time, why? I knew you are a thief and even now, you are planning to lie again. Where is the Prado you used to tell me is yours? Mmmnn? You can't even answer? Nduta will not dance in the money heist!"

Before I could ask anything, she hang up and left me even more disturbed. What she noised about was a hard nut to crack. I recalled one past time she visited me and we joyfully danced to a movie's tune: Lacasa De Papel otherwise known as money heist, her statement was right. One that I could relate with but found no answer. She had succeeded to negotiate with the Government of her life. At least she could have given me a chance to respond. I found myself standing angrily and shouted:

"LADIES, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!! JUST A CHANCE TO RESPOND, AAAH!!!"

### After I had a nap, I texted Melisa a four-word text and added a question mark that read:

"WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?"

### I trusted when she read this, she would consider to tell me the meaning of:

### SEE YOU, the phrase she earlier coined.

I hopefully waited for her view on the text. I waited for the confirming two blue tick (√√) on WhatsApp the whole night until it was dawn on Saturday. The phone was still in my hands as I woke up and the blue ticks were still on the way. Not blue yet.

In the workplace I received her text reply "Jesus would have given you a break-up!" utterly disturbed, I was prompted to share with my boss. She knew she was the cause of my tainted past and she added the sin on the list of confessions. I requested for time off and before she could grant the wish, Madam Alice requested for a minute which I conditionally surrendered as long as sinful acts were not part of the activities to be done in that period.

"Richard what do we do? The government has banned all social gatherings. Tomorrow there will be no church service in the whole country. I am worried that we can't go to church for the confession. Please tell me, what shall we do?"

Madam had asked me what I trusted she could have answered first. In the desert of thoughts, I saw the question bigger than the desert locusts which had recently invaded our nation. I saw myself a cabinet secretary who must provide an answer to my president, lest I be replaced. However, we could still look for a way to contain the locust of sin as we think of what to do next. A man must be a man even when walking by a 'mkwaju'. This manmade proverb reminded me how the government contracted helicopters to spray and scare away hungry and angry locusts out of our motherland. They had something to do and so, like the executive arm in the question, I cleared my throat to give Madam a solution as expected. To give a solution that would cement her question a smidge and smidgeon. Like a mouse in the hands of a fierce cat, she listened as I mystifyingly expectorated on my handkerchief.

"You know", I began, but my answer was interrupted by an uncommon ringtone. I realized she must have changed the common song known by all the juniors. The replacement must have been part of her confession, she must have added it to her own list of sins.

What a friend we have in Jesus,  
All our sins and griefs to bear!  
What a privilege to carry  
everything to God in prayer!  
Oh, what peace we often forfeit,  
Oh, what needless pain we bear,  
All because we do not carry  
Everything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations?  
Is there trouble anywhere?  
We should never be discouraged—  
Take it to the Lord in prayer.  
Can we find a friend so faithful,  
who will all our sorrows share?  
Jesus knows our every weakness;  
Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy-laden,  
Cumbered with a load of care?  
Precious Savior, still our refuge—  
Take it to the Lord in prayer.  
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?  
Take it to the Lord in prayer!  
In His arms He'll take and shield thee,  
Thou wilt find a solace there.

### The phone rang for a full one hundred and twenty seconds as we involuntarily listened to the song till its end. Her husband was calling. Before one could blink the song halted and another song followed in my phone.

I hear the Savior say,  
"Thy strength indeed is small,  
Child of weakness, watch and pray,  
Find in Me thine all in all."

---

Jesus paid it all,  
All to Him I owe;  
Sin had left a crimson stain,  
He washed it white as snow.

Lord, now indeed I find  
Thy power, and Thine alone,  
Can change the leper's spots,  
And melt the heart of stone.

For nothing good have I  
Whereby Thy grace to claim—  
I'll wash my garments white  
In the blood of Calvary's Lamb.

And when, before the throne,  
I stand in Him complete,  
"Jesus died my soul to save,  
My lips shall still repeat.

### I also had changed my ringtone and when I watched Melisa's call before I decided to pick in Madam's presence. The phone rang a second time.

### "Hello dear?" she began the ambiguous conversation and I responded.

### "I read the text you wrote me yesterday. I am sorry but before you probably hang up again, let me tell you that I am sorry. Please forgive me and it's okay, we can break-up"

"I forgive you Richie, I am bored of staying in pain, and I don't know what happened. I ask you kindly to forgive me. I acted in anger. When I visited you yesterday, I was just moody, it is a ladies' stuff. Please don't leave me, please 'abujubuju', will you forgive me Baby?

### I loved the statements and wished she would continue in the exact same way. I could tell my heart had forgiven her already. I wanted to tell her how far her sins to the west from the east were. Before I uttered the affirmative, Madam slowly took the phone and did what is purely historical, geographical and intuitively remembered inside the core of my heart to this day.

### "Hello Melisa? You are talking to Richard's boss. My name is Alice. I am so sorry for stealing your man before. I was the one who had given him my car because I liked him. Please forgive me and forgive him too for.... Am grateful and I love you sweetheart. I look forward to meeting you someday. If you need a job kindly feel welcome to make me your boss. May the good Lord do you well, bye!"

### They conversed longer than I had expected. I couldn't believe she was the one who used to tell me to put my phone off in the old days. In the beginning of their talk I was so uneasy. Right now I was hanging on the main three ropes of life: hope, faith and love. I bent my head over the phone which easily found my left ear a good companion, then she continued with the love song.

### "Babe you are mine, mine to forgive and believe in my beehive's honey, feel forgiven. I want to tell you two things: first, love covers a multitude of sins and second, I will never leave you nor forsake you. I want to be married to you as long as you are genuinely repentant which I trust you are.

### My fiancée seemed like Jesus on the Mount of Olives as he pleaded with God the father:

"Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done."K

### My will was to marry Melisa and so like the angel I strengthened her in conclusion:

### "Baby it is well. Right now we are thinking and planning to meet the pastor who can pray over us. I promise to leave my past, especially with you being the most understanding creature in the word. God will bless you, mother of my kids."

### I humorously cried out more words of affirmation as I waved her a digital good bye. She thirsted humor and as a forgiven sinner, I knew how to best compose and quench her thirst.

I recalled A. B. KITAYI's book I had recently read. A JOURNEY FROM SEXUAL IMMORALITY. I saw myself in my struggles and likened me with Jonny who was also struggling, both of us needed hopeful forgiveness. Melisa was now graciously offering me that hope. At the same time, another book; LIVING IN LOVE by prof. Lameck Ciuma rang in my mind. I thought of me in the beautiful city of Jerusalem, never again to fall in love than to live in love with her.

### Within the microseconds of thoughts, my eyes opened and I saw Madam revolving on her silver coated chair. Maybe she was also wheeling thoughts when suddenly the door was opened without a knock, and I stopped staring at her on my chair.

#  CHAPTER FIVE

### As he furiously got in, I accusatory gave him the eye. Quite a sight I could not behold. Mr. Hitler it was. I was utterly confused. Slowly, I got up: "out of the frying pan into fire. What have I done to God to deserve death, why has He seen it fit to allow my death in the office, the office that I was a joseph- the second in command from my Pharaoh, Madam Alice?" I wondered.

### Fortunately, something unexpected happened, Hitler Knelt so fast as Pharaoh joined me standing authoritatively. He had something to give as he begged us to listen, because of his reverence submission, he needed no permission to begin narrating, only that we couldn't tell what, why, when and how the message would look like, neither to unmask its ending. I felt the need to excuse myself but, Hitler pointed to me to stay. I prayed inwardly for the extemporaneous meeting to end well- the end of a matter is better than the beginning, as they say.

### "I was today released from hospital, for six days I was in hell and saw everything" he started.

### We knew six days ago he fainted in the church but how he got to hell that must be another name for the hospital. We learnt that Hitler's ego must have been humiliated too in the 'hell'. This was not a man to command, rather what he commanded became law, and law to be executed before it was written and ratified. Being in command from the CIA, he could be the last person to read and hearken to the biblical verse:

'... AT THE NAME OF JESUS EVERY KNEE SHOULD BOW, IN HEAVEN AND ON EARTH AND UNDER THE EARTH, AND EVERY TONGUE CONFESS THAT JESUS CHRIST IS LORD, TO THE GLORY OF GOD THE FATHER'. L

Unmindful, he was the only man kneeling. Madam closed the door behind us and then I was somehow sure I was safer in the office than ever. No sin could come near me this day. The devil is a liar.

### Then the man continued.

"He who has ears let him hear what the lord is saying, do not harden your hearts in the time of His visitation. These are the chronicles and words I saw him use to remind me and those we were with, how we got to hell. He said this to us as we waited for our turn to gnash teeth and be thrown into the fire: 'when you were told by pastors to amend your ways, to stop evil ways you did not hear, you treated them with contempt as I wanted. You thought money was the answer to all things but I am sorry, this is hell men!!!'

We all shook with fear as the man showed us who he was. Every day he displayed something, something different and surely I had to believe that this is the devil, and we were in the middle of hell as the furnace burnt the first class sinners waiting for our class to graduate into it. The first thing the creature showed us on Monday, was how he used the gift of SEX to defile humans into sinful lifestyle. He mentioned the word gift severally. To my shock, I saw you, my wife there and you too, Richard falling into hell to join us. I tried to assume but the devil was so convincing that everyone believed what we saw on that wall. There were no screens but the wall changed form into visible displays. Every day was every day. There was no sunrise or sunset.

The second day he showed us how he uses MUSIC to bring down worshippers. He called worshippers the portion of THE KING OF KINGS and other times as I AM! In one occasion he mentioned that he once served as the king of music in heaven and now his territory is the kingdom of the air and under the earth beneath. He cited that media was his best avenue to seduce men into corrupted thoughts. All he wanted was to control the mindset of every worshipper against I AM. He also demonstrated how he uses demonic ringtones to get into the minds of men. They would listen unwillingly first, then meditate on such songs whenever someone calls and lastly appreciate the 'gifts' without knowing what awaits them in hell. Little by little he could finally ensure they stuck with him through thick and thin. This made us all relate with a reason why I was there at first. I wished I had changed my ringtone earlier from the song black or white sang by late Michael Jackson, but we had no phones there, we were fully stripped off our clothes.

### In the third day, he opened the rear wall and we saw what looked like a sea. A mermaid was being CONSULTED by rich pastors, businessmen and other leaders in the world. Most leaders were Blacks who needed powers to move masses. All this didn't look so real until I saw two pastors that I identified as Kenyans. Moreover, I was muttered to see how their followers flocked into these demonic churches even after having doubts with the church leaders. This the creature explained us was the power of a spell. The spell was in two major forms: oil that they applied on the faces of the unsuspecting 'believers' and items encrypted with their photo and signs shown them at the sea. Some women also came to one of the churches in Nairobi to be prayed for and had to pay the pastor with their bodies, most of which willingly did evil and remained faithful before introducing other members to similar conditions. It was so real, so real and unfortunate. On the..."

Before Mr. Hitler could shock us with the wonders of hell in the fourth day, I closed my eyes for a minute because of how his story appeared more real in a series I was following that week on YouTube. I had received the link (https://youtu.be/1vl9GubhHlo) from Melisa before I realized God's prison break had been recently released and unbelievably was the best trending series in Kenya. I remembered how I concentrated on episodes 11 & 12 with curiosity on finding if pastor Nairobi was identified to be in the acts that the producer passionately filmed.

### In the office I felt to ask for finer details of my church with hell's view but I couldn't interrupt the man from heck vacation. I feared Hitler and especially in a time where he was ruling with a story that only him could tell us the moral of it.

"... Showed us how politicians seek witchcraft in order to get into power and fame. He showed us how easily he uses the professional trick with hopes of making a name for men. We saw what looked like a scepter that some even in Kenya took for power renewal every year with blood sacrifices, some of human beings and others of animals. He cited that men who cannot humble were the best leaders in his kingdom in contrast to THE OTHER KINGDOM! He seemed to shudder when mentioning the other. He then cited that it is written: 'no one could follow the holy one if he can't deny himself.'M

### The devil seemed to know more of the bible than we who lived in the church before for years. We only wondered why he left his heavenly nature in rebellion and yet talked about witchcraft; but no one could speak due to the highest levels of fear reigning.

The fifth day he showed us how he wins the hearts of men in what he called HAPPINESS. He said he offered happiness best in weekends through clubs, pubs, drug addictions bases, home parties and also in lodgings. What caught most of my attention, is the creature's mention of this place: palace hotel. He looked at me and explained something. I saw a lot of rich people order and merry from this place, some I could tell they served in the government while others were foreigners. After they ate their food, they were going inside the auditorium in the underground room where loud and unclear music laid as a foundation to kill the conscience of them all. Then they could easily sleep with any opposite gender in the vicinity. No one seemed to understand that the devil was behind the schemes, especially in enticing the few who were church goers. Food was served them in the morning again as they woke up to travel to their counties. The name of the best cook was most often mentioned as Mrs. Kalonzo!"

Not long before Mrs. Chakula got inside the office from nowhere. She humbly said that she sat outside waiting for her weekly salary which was normally paid every Saturday evening. She said that she waited for so long but no sooner had she contemplated of going home without money than she heard her official name called out, this time from the unfamiliar voice of a man. What shocked her as she tried to explain herself, was not the wage delay but why on earth did Hitler call her while kneeling down. It was a puzzling riddle that nobody was willing to disclose its meaning. It was also clear that darkness was coming, but we could not leave the office. Madam switched the lights on and her office became an old man 'thingira' (old man house in the traditional African setting- normally the man gave stories of old there).

### I gave Mrs. Chakula a personified look and so did Madam, it was to signal her to keep calm because all was not normal and she adhered without a word and retained her attention! It was clear that she understood the man Hitler was in authority though on his knees. Quietly everyone remained inside as I pushed the door behind us to avoid further interruption. We needed the story to come to a conclusion and maybe get the recommendations from the creature. "This end will surely end a lot of things", I told myself as I beckoned Hitler to continue. This time while sobbing heavily, he lifted his head up, looked to where I believed his help could come from and said:

### "The sixth day is where I saw myself and ran in disbelief. He had showed us what brought me here. I realized nothing is hidden even when done in secret. This is why I came here as a wind. Please listen, please I beg you, don't let anything else or anyone else disrupt what I am going to say. I would rather die and leave all of you three, safe and sound. God is warning you, please listen, Pu..., pliii.., pleasss............, pleaseeeeee...." He slithered out loudly and we empathetically joined to sob, it was a cry room with crying big babies for quite a few minutes.

Her wife then knelt and begged him to calm down. I remember very well how she gently tapped him and severally said 'wachakuliamzeewangu' (calm down my husband). The story was no longer a lie. This man could never cry without a bullet in his flesh. This hell he talked about must not have existed in his mind like we first thought. If it was really in his mind, he could not have come here after being discharged. He would have found his way easily to anyone mad like him. Mathare hospital would have been the next stage from the church sanatorium. (Mathare hospital is mainly a hospital that serves patients with mental disorders).

### What is this one thing that shook 'mzee' to come here and keep us waiting to listen to his unending tale? This story had more of curiosity that sense. I wished to leave but I was long incarcerated and had already turned a loyal jailbird. Only pharaoh could open the chains to my freedom. In my impatience, Hitler calmed down as his wife rubbed his tears with her white dress. The he said:

### "I saw it and I wouldn't believe how I were so arrogant and ignorant all the time the pastor preached us. The devil told us while looking at me:

"It is written that the love of MONEY is the root of all evil." N

### As he looked more close to me my mind felt something, something like guiltiness inside me deeply. I felt I was the money lover and what I did all along was the root. As I shoot on the outward, people revered and respected me everywhere. I was stealing from the poor people in every investigation and got myself so rich. Whenever I felt it was wrong I used to give big bunches back though functions. As people celebrated me then, I felt relieved of the ill, actually many pastors commissioned and committed the 'work' of my hands to God. My wife here was always happy that I was 'industrious, ambitious and responsible' to bring enough bread on the table.

### The creature told us while condemning us in a loud coarse voice:

"Any true man who could not have come here was breaking the true bread of life to his family. He then taught them to live by Him!O Secondly, that man provided food to his immediate family for their body. Didn't you read what Moses said? How did you want to escape here without I AM's word? A man who heard and obeyed Him I feared. But you! And you! And you! ..."

### He pointed us with his horrifying red eyes as we coiled ready for annihilation.

### "You couldn't sit down and explain the food to your families. You enjoyed a lot of pleasure outside marriage and when you returned just wanted to rest. Broken city walls, men without self-control, and the trend continues"

I felt utterly wasted. I felt sorry that I hypocritically complained to you about our children's school welfare whist I couldn't spare an hour for the word of God. I always had time for pleasure amongst the clocking 24 hours but I didn't set a life alarm for what really mattered, no wonder when they grow and marry there are generational problems. All my children have failed, Jesus what do I do? Joyce is like my wife, she always runs from her rough husband and they are barely married for six months. Six months! Sankara whom I thought is a genteel, now it is the 10th time he was caught in robbery. My third born haven't finished high school and yet, Pablo is a drug lot, together with Chenguavara our 15-year-old son, they want to blot out our name on the face of the earth. What is it we want with money that we have inwardly wasted our lives like dogs! Why? Why now...?"

### Madam consoled him. His voice was not audible any more. His face had turned pale and the wife was no better as they closed arms in embrace. Minutes of silence passed.

### From his trouser pocket, his phone interposed:

Moyo wangu, usilietena (My heart, do not cry no more)  
Moyo wangu, usibabaike (My heart, do not worry)  
Unaye Mungu, mkuu sana (For you have a Mighty God)  
Unaye Mungu, muweza wa yote (You have an Omnipotent God)

Refrain:  
Aliingia moyoni mwangu (He came into my heart)  
Kanipa kutulia (And gave me peace)  
Kaniambia "ewe mwanangu (He told me "My child)  
Usilie lie tena (do not cry any more)  
Ninajua shida zako (For I know your troubles)  
Mimi nitazitatua" (and I will solve them")  
Bila Yesu, mimi ni mtu bure (Without Jesus, I am nothing)  
Bila Yesu, mimi ni mtu bure (Without Jesus, I am nothing)

Kati giza, Yesu ni mwanga (In darkness, Jesus is the Light)  
Kati huzuni, Yesu ni mfariji (In sadness, Jesus is the Comforter)  
Kati vita, Yesu mwamba (In battle, Jesus is the Refuge)  
Katika njaa, Yesu ndiye mkate (In famine, Jesus is the Bread of life)  
Yesu kimbilio, hajawahi kuniacha (Jesus is the Refuge, he has never left me)  
Yesumwambawangu, mahali pa kujificha (Jesus is my Rock, my hiding place)  
Yesukimbilio, hajawahikuniacha (He is the Refuge, he has never left me)  
Yesumwambawangu, mahali pa kujificha (Jesus is my Rock, my hiding place)  
Anajuashida zangu, Yeyeatazitatua (He knows my troubles, he will solve them)  
BilaYesu, mimi ni mtu bure (For without Jesus, I am nothing)  
BilaYesu, mimi ni mtu bure (Without Jesus, I am nothing)

(Refrain)

Ndani ya Kristoninawekatumainilangu (I have placed my hope in Christ)  
Sijuibilawewe Bwana wangu(Without You my Lord)  
Ningekuwa wapi (Where would I be?)  
Eh Yahweh, we ni yotekwangu (Oh Lord, You are everything to me)x?

Eh Yahweh, we ni yotekwangu (Oh Lord, You are everything to me)  
Eh Yahweh, ningekuwa wapi? (Oh Lord, where would I be?)  
Eh Yahweh, we ni yotekwangu (Oh Lord, You are everything to me)  
Eh Yahweh, ningekuwa wapi? (Oh Lord, where would I be?) (Repeat

### Hitler was in immovable shock. We realized that it was not the normal ringtone. He also affirmed it though he was alarmed who did it. Who baptized it? As the tune persisted, he picked the call by the advice of Madam. Upon picking, the phone fell off his shaking hands on the red office carpet. Then he stammered and said:

### "It is pastor Nairobi. How is it that I didn't change the dance hall ringtone myself? This new ringtone is also familiar, where did I hear it, who sang it? Someone tell me what is happening here."

### "When I visited you in the hospital, I got concerned and changed your ringtone. Some nurses asked me why the ringtone of a church elder was secular and shamelessly I feigned our children. I then changed to make sure they believed my words, this new song is the one sang by 'wamama' (slang: women) in the church. You must have heard it baby as we sang last Sunday. I like it also. Stop crying mzee..."

### Madam cleared the polluted air of thoughts in our minds and more so in her husband's.

### But this man must have come from hell and not from the hospital. What he said before the ringtone interrupted, left all of us kneeling to an unknown helper. Hitler had confirmed what I always thought he couldn't do, at least for the sake of his position as a conferred elder and chairman for development committee in the church. He contradicted our thoughts when he revealed how they grabbed land from the poor by ensuring their houses were first demolished without any lawful grounds. Such people would later be consoled by giving them foodstuffs and other survival amenities for a small period until the matter was forgotten in the minds of the public. I pitied those who must have suffered under his regrettable actions. 'Where was the God of the fatherless, the widows and the widowers, the one who promised he will watch over them and be their help?' This question remained unanswered until I remembered where the sinner saw himself. After the few years of 'peace', hell was waiting for eternal torment to its members and Hitler must have subscribed. His subscription must have been premium and not just basic.

### The baptized phone rang again and this time we remained silent as the pastor talked to his biggest source of income, income that was now under condemnation.

"Bwana asifiwe mtu wa mungu?" (Praise the Lord son of the God). Pastor began what we all listened in loud speaker. Hitler answered in a barely audible voice and confirmed he was listening.

"We are sorry the government banned all social gatherings which included the religious meetings. This means there will be no services for us tomorrow at JESUS PAID IT ALL CHURCH.I kindly request you three things as a man of God. Is that in order baba Pablo?"

### "Yes Reverend", Hitler answered. He always referred him with much honor sometimes as reverend and other times as bishop Nairobi.

"One, you must teach your children and wife the word of God. Everyday share with them scriptures so that their eyes can be opened to know what God is saying in coronavirus times. We may not fathom why corona came but we want to know what the voice of God in it is. Be Pastor Nairobi to them and possibly every Sunday do a home service for at least two hours.

### The second request is to humbly honor myself to ask that you watch our online services that will be live on YouTube page: Jesus Paid it all Church or Facebook page, I can't remember the name but my son will tell you later, for now he told me we can be seen live from tomorrow especially on YouTube.

If you find it in your heart, the third appeal is to allow me receive your tithes. You can support the work of God through our paybill number while I humbly request you not to send your offerings. Use your offerings to look after orphans and neighbors who are hungry and thereby feed them in these probable hard economic times. God bless you Elder Hitler"

### The pastor hanged up so fast after 'the three prophetic decrees'. I wondered how fast he did that; the fingers must have been trained to save on credit. It was though he had forgotten who he had called, the TITHER! Pastor's words were not only affirmative but final. This time he spoke with authority that was from God the father. His phone must be the mouthpiece of the Holy Spirit saying:

'Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."P

### This was a shock. Would anyone really help us out of the spine pig's hole? Why did he throw those erectile and sharp spines on us? He attacked us like a porcupine to a dangerous retaliator. The pastor had requested without waiting for confirmation. Among the three things only one and the last item could Hitler afford to offer. We were all kneeling down without a master. We didn't need one that time if only we were strengthened like an ant. Ants are creatures of little strength, yet they store up their food in summer, this was our summer but we were so weak. Time was moving very fast without our notice. All we needed was a savior who could appear and help us focus unto heaven more. As one quote from Eng. P. M. Kagunya in the TOC Quotes says: if one cannot manage his focus, he can't manage his time either; we were like sheep without a shepherd, oblivious of who to focus on. It became darker and darker and darker; no solution was available.

#  F FOR WHAT?

>>>>>>>>>>>>

#  CHAPTER SIX

My name is Richard >>>>>>>>>>>>

#

### "Ngai mwega" (Good lord). She shouted!

### This was a signal that she was apologetically telling us to wake up and forgive her. The birds we singing melodiously with crickets joining to make morning a cappella quartets and choruses. Mr. Hitler was embracing the wife in a cradle posture as they waked up. The whole area had turned into a 3- bedroom house. The problem with its definition is that it had no physical demarcations. Mrs. Chakula came-alive and woke before each of us. Now she wanted forgiveness but no one was sitting on the judgment throne. Her sins were truly forgiven without an apology. Madam quickly released him off her hands and thanked her for alerting us. Hitler also thanked her but I didn't. Actually I realized it was not her acts they were grateful for. Rather, they felt ashamed that in the same room they were caught ghastly and kooky asleep and now they had to make the issue look so normal in our eyes. Even though I could forget the sight, I couldn't rub the instance with any rubber in the world. The 9XXB graphite pencil that was writing my mind lacked a compatible rubber, and so was it writing the mind of Mrs. Chakula.

### 5:50 am on Sunday morning Madam comforted our question, the hotel will remain closed due to government's notice she had received the previous day.

### In the confusion of what to do next, Hitler said to all of us, his wife inclusive in the remarks:

### "We will remain here today. I will pay all of you for working overtime on Sunday. But I want all of you to kindly help me know this- what must I do with all the money I have gained in corrupt wherewithal?"

### As he talked I whispered to Chakula the meaning of wherewithal, I had fast checked at it in the phone before I suavely whispered to her: 'njiambaya'. And she smiled. Then we listened more.

### "What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul? Please assist me, what do you say Mrs. Kalonzo?" He ushered the first respondent while her wife embraced him again.

She helplessly tried to explain what he ought to do. I hardly could understand what she meant in every sentence. She spoke with hands, legs, eyes and all parts of the body more than she uttered a rational English word. The only thing she suggested that looked rational was one. She told Him to stop going to parties with the money he got from his evil ways.

### "That's enough!" Hitler conclusively interrupted.

### "LET ME FINISH!"

What seemed like a calm rehabilitation center turned out with a cook as the new king of kings, the unstoppable woman in the midst of defeated kings. Chakula was breathing fiercely and made us fear while she stood up. How Hitler kept silent made her embracing wife release his hands off the chest; signifying something darkly untold was to be revealed in the broad daylight. Hitler factitiously coughed. Her words seemed to contain volcanic power that ailed him with pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis lung disease.

### Mrs. Chakula continued in the silence:

### "I want all of you to know, the machine that I drive was bought by this man. He told me never to disclose when he sexually molested me and covered it all with car keys. Furthermore, he promised one thing after that night in my house. He would be fueling the Nissan but now I can believe what is written here."

### She removed her maroon sweater and turned back. The writings on her blue T-shirt were in white. It was what she allowed us read before repeating the words again.

"When a wicked man dies, his hope perishes; all that he expected from his power comes to nothing!Q

### This man died off with his promises since last week when coronavirus 'came'. He went to hiding and could not pick my calls, he thought I will not find him. That's why I have lately been coming late to work Madam. Yesterday I saw him and I promised to tell you in his presence.

### As a mother of 11 children, I earlier considered his proposal so that I could raise them well irrespective of the low salary I get here. As a single mother, this man was a bank in this man-eat-man Kenyan economy. That is how I have well lived in the last two years."

### But! My sinful husband there is more"

### She altered her gaze and addressed Hitler calmly as a friend. 'I could smell real hell.' I had a feeling that 'it takes two to tango' and maybe she wanted to reveal her dark world too.

### "Having forgotten my umbrella, I realized my sins were a drop in the ocean one rainy evening when I came back to office. It was a little bit dark and no one except the gate guard and these bosses were around. You Madam Alice shamelessly caressed this boy near his Prado car as I peeped through kitchen window; unbelievably for about 1 hour."

### Mrs. Chakula was going too far yet she was not prophesying doom. She was bringing to light what she saw last month- that Monday evening. Maybe she knew even more and this bothered me without strength to stop her. Calling me a boy was no big problem at the time. The mixed reactions in the den of sinners was the jumbo worry. Sinners that could only try to compare the quality and quantity of their nanna.

### Who could help the other? No one was clean enough. We silently kept our heads down and wished to play it as it comes. If anyone else could come in the den, even the guard at the gate of PALACE HOTEL, that would mean the end or turn of the worrying conditions in the office.

Amusingly, the gate man knocked the door three times. By the fourth time, Madam reached to him so fast. We heard him outside trying to explain to her how he was caring and concerned after realizing her car was outside the whole night, he said he had come to see if she was attacked by 'chokora' (street thugs). I think he must have heard our voices. Madam drove him off with his words before he could get us more perturbed. She came back and apologized as though she did something wrong again. I forgave her to appease to Mrs. Chakula to free us.

### "However, as your employee I am also guilty. I said I will never allow my family lack food. Every single Saturday I carried off two bales of wheat flour and two liters of cooking oil. Others I carried when a need arose. I swore to myself- if anyone could obstruct my way, then I could obstruct your ways too. You were my scape goat. Your sins were helping me to steal with confidence.

On one occasion, it was the eve of Christmas and some cooks had started praying an omen while others warned me. I allotted them 1000kg 'gift' of rice and sugar and wheat flour from the second store house that you gave me the spare key. They divided amongst 66 of them and the four guards. Then they remained royal. That's why they loved and nicknamed me Mrs. Chakula, and both of you danced into the tune of the song. You sang every time you saw me pass by and never minded why the song was composed. My name is Mrs. Kalonzo that is my name from now, don't ever remind me of my sins. Please."

### She had begun to rub her tears with the elbow when she came back to our sinful level.

### "I am here not to judge anyone. As you can see, I am the worst of all sinners. I feel worse than Paul who persecuted churches. I had made this hotel my church and I knew I caused losses. I must say I need your forgiveness, please Madam, please, I am very sorry, please, please, please forgive me."

### She cried to Alice on her knees and she was easily heard of her reverent submission.

### What an affectionate close and adorable hug that overwhelmed their tears! When I opened my eyes wider I saw what looked like the famous greeting between Mary the mother of Jesus and Elizabeth the mother of John the Baptist. I and the CID stopped looking at them and followed suit. He stepped towards me as I ran towards him. For the first time I embraced him. I think I should say he embraced me. He was very tall to be embraced by a boy. When I looked up as my head rested on his tummy, I saw what I could only relate with King David when he also looked up and said:

"I lift up my eyes to the hills.

Where does my help come from?

My help comes from the lord,

The maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip-

He who that watches over you will not slumber;

Indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep;

The lord watches over you-

The lord is your shade at your right hand;

The sun will not harm you by day,

Nor the moon by night.

The lord will keep you from all harm-

He will watch over your life;

The lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore

### The house of embracement was a clear indication that the parable of the lost son had a lasting impact after being narrated to the 'sinners' by the Man who embraced the cross. But we needed a higher assurance better than hugs. We needed a heaven that can put a signet ring on our fingers as a sign of reinstatement as heirs of the kingdom.

"moyo wangu usi lie tena,

Moyo..."

### As his phone disrupted our small heaven, we listened the loudspeaker and identified someone worthy had come to our rescue.

### "How was your morning mwana wa mungu?"

The question became a rhetoric to all of us. We hadn't noticed that the morning was over. It was 2pm in the afternoon according to the antique yet elegant wall clock. When Shakespeare in 1800 recorded the idiomatic phrase 'time flies...' he was wrong and so was Alexander pope when he said 'swift fly the years'. They could be more precise and say that the speed in which time flies is higher than that of light. The manner in which time passed in that office was enough case study that time could move at a rate higher than 3 x 108 m/s.

### "Pastor am fine, I thank God", Hitler lied the Pastor. This made Madam add it to the list of confessions as she also updated what Mrs. Kalonzo earlier confessed to us. But the pastor seemed in a hurry when he added:

"First watch the last portion of my preaching: please give me, I will give you. It is online on You Tube. Click Jesus Paid it all Church and subscribe for free. Find day 1 and watch till the end. Can you promise to do that?"

### Before the question was possibly emphasized, we all confusedly and harmoniously answered with a big YES. Hitler hanged up, surprisingly mimicking his reverend he said: "shall we?" and all of us laughed happily in agreement.

### Madam hurriedly neared and switched the 52-inch grey framed screen. Before corona, this used to be our world cup stadium for all national and international football matches. The screen was big enough to verify and make one feel like he/ she was actually participating.

### All of us sat down on the carpet and leaned on the far left corner, eager to listen to the last portion of the man of God. Thanks to God that everything happens for good to those who loves Him. Now I was comfortably sitting beside a high ranking CIA and the word was fulfilled that says: ye shall sit and dine with kings. This I don't remember where it is written in the bible. But in accordance to what I promised myself yesterday, to read and meditate on the scriptures daily, I am sure before I meet a pothole I will meet this word somewhere.

### Madam Alice requested us to stand and sing one song before she could download the whole two hours' sermon. I think she wanted us see the best quality. Though slowly downloading, 1080 pixels meant that some of us will think the pastor is right there inside the office. We stood to obey her words but I wasn't sure who would lead, whether the cook, the CID or worst enough me. I recall how the choir excused me when I joined the church and felt I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. They kindly excused me to try and join another ministry as long as it was not ministering in songs anywhere. One lady who sang in soprano also pointed that the piano was tired searching for my voice, this disgusted me and never again was I to join a ministry in the church unless its name is spectators.

### We later realized Chakula was very talented when she led in one beautiful song. This song made us jump during the whole chorus even in stanzas that had nothing to do with jumping.

You are here, Moving in our midst  
I worship You I worship You.  
You are here, Working in this place  
I worship You, I worship You.

Yea, _Way maker_  
 _Miracle worker, Promise keeper_  
 _Light in the darkness, My God._  
 _That is who You are_

You are here, Touching every heart  
I worship You, I worship You.  
You are here, Healing every heart  
I worship You, I worship You  
You are here, Turning lives around

_Way maker, Miracle worker_  
 _Promise keeper, Light in the darkness_  
 _My God, That is who You are._  
 _Way maker, Miracle worker_  
 _Promise keeper, Light in the darkness_  
 _My God, That is who You are_

You wipe away all tears  
You mend the broken heart  
You're the answer to it all, Jesus.  
You wipe away all tears  
You mend the broken heart  
You're the answer to it all  
To it all, Jesus.

_Way maker, Miracle worker_  
 _Promise keeper, Light in the darkness_  
 _My God, That is who You are._  
 _Way maker, Miracle worker_  
 _Promise keeper, Light in the darkness_  
 _My God, That is who You are_

You are here, touching every life  
I worship you, I worship you.  
You are here, Meeting every need  
I worship you...

### Before we could finish off the beautiful song, the power in the whole building went off. The Generator was also off and no one knew how to put it on, even if we knew, no one was ready to joke with the brother of lightening. Death by will must never be sought.

"Why can God allow electricity to go off when we needed to listen to Him?" I couldn't figure what omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent meant even as I recalled Madam Chege's emphasis on God. As our physics and religious teacher, she always insisted that Christian religious education is the best foundation to see God in all our ways. Those days maybe she was teaching Kinuthias' only. All these were crossing my mind when I realized that everyone was in prayers. My fellow sinners praying in the office! In the city so magnificent, trouble-makers now wanted God to bring electricity back. To Mrs. Kalonzo, the office she used to run into and was made safe from financial constraints, now had turned into a prayer center. I didn't want to look like the odd one out lest I be actually out. I therefore shyly whispered to God that I couldn't see:

### "Lord, I am sorry for doubting your power, you are God of miracles, you saved the Israelites with a mighty and outstretched arm king of glory, you forgave David when he enticed Bathsheba, you saved Daniel from the den of many lions my father, you are the same from the beginning to the end, you made the heavens and the earth, you changed water into wine, you walked on water, you released Paul and Silas from jail, you raised Lazarus from the dead, you also raised yourself, you are my..."

### And before I could call God as my help in times of need, He did one miracle to us in our very eyes. This must be added to the books of chronicles of the precious books of miracles. It was a miracle that must never be ignored. When men will be saying of how much God did them in the corona times, for me God restored one thing:

  * ### power

### Power was back on grid and now even penetrating in the room, I felt like to change my prayers with the song:

Yupo Mungu mbinguni **(There is a God in Heaven)**  
Asikiaye maombi yetu **(Who hears our prayers)**  
Yupo Mungu mbinguni **(There is a God in heaven)**  
Ayajibuye maombi yetu **(Who answers our prayers)**

Tunaopo omba, asikia, anajibu **(When we pray, He hears and He answers)**  
Tunapo omba, asikiamaombiyetu **(When we pray, He hears our prayers)**  
Tunaopo omba, asikia, anajibu **(When we pray, He hears and He answers)**  
Tunapo omba, asikia maombi yetu **(When we pray, He hears our prayers)**

Usikiaye maombi **(The One who hears our prayers)**  
Ujibuye kwa moto **(The One who answers with fire)**  
Bwana, u mwaminifu **(Lord, You are faithful)**  
Usikiaye maombi **(The One who hears our prayers)**  
Ujibuye kwa moto **(The One who answers with fire)**  
Baba, u mwaminifu **(Father, You are faithful)** _(Repeat)_

### But I found myself laughing when Mrs. Kalonzo began solely singing the song:

Refrain:   
Wanaokudharau siku moja watakusalimia kwa heshima  
(Those who despise you, one day will greet you with respect)  
(repeat)

Mateso yako ni ya mudatu, Mungu akuandalia ushuhuda  
(Your troubles are only for a time, God is preparing a testimony for you)  
Daudi Alikuwa mchunga kondoo, Mungu akamwinua kuwa mfalme  
(David was a shepherd, God lifted him to be a king)  
Leo unaitwa ombaomba, kesho utaitwa mbarikiwa  
(Today you are called a beggar, tomorrow you will be called blessed)  
Licha unatembea kwa miguu, kesho utaendeshagari  
(Inspite of walking, tomorrow you will drive a car)

Chorus:  
Nasema watakusalimia, kwa heshima (I say they will greet you, with respect)  
Watakusalimia, kwa heshima (They'll greet you with respect)  
Wakati wako wa kuinuliwa, ukifika (When your time to be lifted, has come)  
Watakusalimia, kwaheshima (They will greet you, with respect)  
Wakati wako wa kubarikiwa, ukifika (When your time to be blessed, arrives)  
Watakusalimia, kwaheshima (They'll greet you with respect)  
Wakatiwako wa kukumbukwa, ukifika (When your time to be remembered arrives)  
Watakusalimia, kwaheshima (They'll greet you with respect)

### The only thing that made me not to sing is the fact that my enemy- The Kenya Power and lighting company. No one was close from that company to see my joy. "They thought that they owned the power but God proved them he can change everything; he is the owner of lightening." I thought as we sat down.

### As the blue download line was travelling across to the far right side of the screen, we were becoming impatient but hope consumed us for 10 minutes. Madam was the DJ controlling the square. Before she could act like one, she took the remote and joined us at the silversmith floor. We were there seated but on Gods' hands as pieces of unrefined silver. He had placed us in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn all the impurities. We never minded 'wasting' time. God did not only hold us in the refining fire but also we felt His presence like in a church service. He had to keep his eyes on the four silver pieces the entire time we were on fire. If the silver was left for a moment too long or too short, it would be destroyed. The only way He could tell that we were now fully refined is when He saw his image in us.

### Pastor Nairobi was now on TV for the first time. Thanks God for such times. Those who failed to give him a chance to be on air must now be watching with a single unbelieving eye. All these times they had continued behaving and treating him normally but now they were being treated abnormally on the TV.

### The show began with a small session of praise and worship. The song this time had a message from the first line to the last. I listened and listened. I sang along and sang along. Before conclusion I missed to sing the first stanza.

Indo ciakurua mbara ni nyingi (weapons of war are many)  
Onayo miruire thitairu ciakuhura nacio ni nyingi (also ways and styles of fighting are many)  
Micinga na mabanga ona ndotono (guns, pangas and machete)  
Kuri andu aria ahonoku acio matihuranaga na mwiri (To the saints, the fight is not by flesh)  
Ona gwatuika turi na mwiri uyu (even though we have flesh)  
Miruire ya mbara thitairu ciitu ciothe ni cia roho (our way of fighting and styles are of spirit)  
Ona cio indo iria turuaga nacio (the weapons that we also use)  
Ni indo iri na uhoti wa guthukia mawira ma caitani (they have the power to destroy the works of satan)

Chorus:   
Tutiruaga Na mwiri Na thakame (we don't fight by flesh and blood)  
Messiah niatonyire thini witu (messiah has come in us)  
Agiaka mwako mweru wakiroho (he built new buildings which are spiritual)  
Turuaga mbara iria ciakiroho (we only fight spiritual battles)

### The song being from my motherland, I understood the song lyrics and the sounds alike. Every word had two meanings, the outer and the inner one. When the pastor began the message in line with the song, I allowed him fully to prophesy to my body without ignoring my soul. My fight was on the level of the spirit having failed to say no to all ungodliness for a long time. He began so well; you could think it wasn't the first time.

"I greet you all my viewers. Thank you for tuning on through our channel Jesus Paid it all Church. Consider subscribing for free so that you can receive more upcoming 3 minutes summon nets. We will be updating daily status of corona in Kenya and the whole world and also send money to those who will subscribe and will share our videos. Sometimes we will pray against those acting against the government as long as God will lead us. Also we will bring the message of hope at the end of every update and also warn against heresies of those trying to speak and masquerade as angels of light.

### We are in times that many prophets have gone into the world. In presumptuous thoughts, they are trying to bring down the wall we are building. Like Sanballat the Horonite and Tobias the Ammonite, we must consider them our enemy in the fight against corona. Don't hearken to those saying Jesus is coming back today or tomorrow, they are liars, pure liars. Others are saying that rain will fall and wash away corona, they don't have any biblical supporting words and so we must shun away from them lest they steal your hearts to serve other gods. The bible is so clear that no one knows when He will come back for the church. The only thing we can do in these times of corona is to rationally act from facts; and the fact is that I also don't know why coronavirus has spread in the world. Having being a nurse for 8 years, I can tell us with confidence that this virus will come to an end, the same way the other small viruses are fought. Yes, we are in end times but no one should be alarmed because of this virus. When I quitted nursing I found another bigger virus that spreads the same way as corona."

The pastor continued with an introduction relating to the times. He was a man of seasons. Amidst his message he raised my thoughts to a helicopter level with one thing. The thing made me respect him more and thereby pay more close attention so that I may not drift away from his message. The thoughts were however gravitationally brought to landing. I was shocked to hear that him too had gone to school and studied nursing, the why of the change of his career was mysterious like covid-19 but it must be termed for good. His deep voice related so well with preaching. As he continued, one instance we all found ourselves lifting hands with the words of amen violently confirming his message. And we listened more waiting for a release of a quickening rhema word.

### "But, the whole world must worry for a bigger virus that will have its outcome lavage all who do not heed. Today I therefore bring us this sermon as a warning of it. The number of confirmed cases in Kenya is everyone born of a woman. All of us in the world are born with the virus. Researchers have studied for its medicine but they say it can't be tested on animals like in the case of other viruses. It affects only humans. Its medicine was ignored by those who discovered it at skull-shaped hill called Golgotha, the place of skulls in Jerusalem.

Child of God listen before you can switch off the most important part. I have been sent to tell you that the medicine is the stone that he builders rejected and now He has become the capstone.R

### The medicine for this eternal pandemic is available and no need to pay for it, no need to reject it because no other better way will be found to cure the ailment. Actually no one will pay for anyone to vaccinate you. The syringe that will be used to inject is the same for all earth dwellers. The name of the virus you must hear it before you can discover that you are the carrier. Giving you the background will help you to read till the most important ending.

### It was manufactured in one town not far from Wuhan China. The specific town was called Eden though now it's changed. The virus however came through one animal called a snake. It then got into another 'animal' called Eve and now dwells and kills the desire of every man. The virus is intended to please the one who manufactured it.

### If you don't listen to the last two statements that I will conclude with, I fear that you might be part of the confirmed deaths from the virus. The good thing is that this virus can be starved to death through washing hands, sanitizing and most importantly avoiding contact with those who are showing signs of it. Today only one and the last way will I educate you on; this is the third appetite added to the other two appetites that I have preached on the last two Sundays in my Church. They were appetite for sex and for finances and particularly the love of money. The third and the last part is the lack of SELF-CONTROL TO FOOD."

### We all looked to Mrs. Chakula and remembered her story. Her acts were ready to be nailed on the cross. When we noticed she was sobbing, we had to shift eyes back to the cause of her remorse.

"Yes, if you don't control yourself from the appetite of food, the virus called SIN can easily grow to full brown stage and cause death, even if you are a Christian already without the symptoms. My brother said the other day: 'everything is permissible for me'-but not everything is beneficial. 'everything is permissible for me'-but I will not be mastered by anything' S how then are you being controlled so easily. You get hungry and then do all you can to feed, when you feel like you are having more than enough; you go looking for what you think is 'better food' in the clubs!"

### The pastor used to bring past tense scriptures into present continuous tense. How could he talk of Paul who lived and died about 67AD being his brother? At least by guessing his age, my pastor is no older than the 'milk president', the second president of the republic of Kenya. Furthermore, no one in the burial of this founding father talked of him as a brother of Paul or even saw him. They also had heard of him and followed his teachings. Not even in the burial of the renowned apologist Ravi Zacharias that anyone would 'blaspheme' the name of this priest in the bible.

### However, pastor's humor made the preaching enjoyable; that's what his wife said every Sunday. This must not just be attributed to her being a wife because we also enjoyed along.

### The pastor continued:

### "They who cannot control themselves and fast for at least one hour, Jesus alluded that they will fall into temptation. The spirit is always willing but the inviting body will feel weak.

### Don't tell me you are too busy in your work that you cannot pray. Shame on you! Who told you that you got your work? Which work? Shame on you again! You want to tell me that as a politician you don't get time to eat? You want again to look inside mine eyes, lie to me as a businessman that you don't get time to bathe. As a senior employer in that company that God has bestowed your skills to lead, leading others and now you harbor thoughts that you can't lead yourselves to prayer? You must be among the confirmed sinful cases in the world. Are you sure you are ready to burn painfully in hades without being consumed? This will steal your soul, this will kill and destroy you. Food will smell like..."

### We felt like the preacher was the mighty Babylonians prophesied by prophet Jeremiah, he seemed so sure of what is happening in us. The room had four people and I don't know why he saw others that we couldn't. We weren't politicians nor businessmen, we didn't get our careers in the sermon. We were simply sinners from Judah. Our city of Jerusalem was the small office. How could God annihilate us when we mostly needed his peace? We needed His mercy not the sword. Our minds yearned for what he said to Judah dwellers in the Bible in Lamentations:

'Yet this I call to mind

And therefore have hope:

Because of the lord's great love, we are not consumed,

For his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;

Great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself,

'The lord is my portion therefore I will wait for him.'

The lord is good to those whose hope is in him,

To the one who seeks Him;

It is good to wait quietly

For the salvation of the lord.

It is good for a man to bear the yoke

While he is young' T

### But who knows what God could do in these times? The only thing we had faith in is a 66 book though it was only one. Hitler had a small book that he removed from his pocket and we knew he was seriously looking for help like us. At least the book doesn't lie. I had however realized one thing: having the book is so easy but using it is so hard. We needed to be more intentional in that office to fully believe what the pastor was saying, though on TV we knew one more thing; he was a man under authority, reading from the best book in the world. He lifted the hard copy and continued:

"...is all we need but, food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food- but God will destroy them both. What will happen when your stomach can't receive more food? What will it be said of you when you will be laid in your coffin whether in parliament or in the village? As we come to see your corpse I promise you my viewer, there is no food we can give to a dead body. We will prevaricate to you there saying how we miss, respects and loves you. Some will also say vague truths by putting the tense in its right form. They will say that they loved you but you will not hear them because there is no link between the dead and the living. The only people who might console your past evil deeds on earth will be the dead. And actually the ones who will bury you are the dead!

### My viewer as I finish, Jesus is telling us: 'let the dead bury their dead. Therefore, come out from them and be separate, touch no unclean thing and I will receive you' God is waiting to hear you say—yes I am a pastor in the church, but a sinner; yes, I am a politician who goes to church, but I am a sinner; yes, I am a businessman and tithes well, but a sinner; yes, you are seated listening to me in your office, but a sinner! Mention who you are and shame the devil, shame him right now, now! Now! Noooow! In the mighty name of Jesus!

### My viewer see you next time as you shame 'kimunya' (the devil)"

### The pastor was closing his preaching without the promise of an altar call. He seemed not to love it on TV. We missed to call him but we realized that our smartphones were off-power. His phone number was known to me and Hitler's family. How could we forget the number that used to receive our ten percent!

Hitler's phone was off too but he realized Mrs. Kalonzo had put her phone off earlier to save on power. She told us this as she handed him the phone. He clicked the number +254 703 256 412 and the pastor's wife received instead. We requested her to quickly hand over the phone to the pastor but the phone hanged by itself. Mrs. Chakula told us that she didn't have enough credit to have enabled us a long call. She returned the phone in the small 'basket' held on her hands. All our bigger phones were fully dead-power. Charging them could have taken longer than we anticipated to have poured our hearts like water in the presence of the Lord. She had to return her phone in the old purse.

We had enough money to buy not only credit but also being business minded on the future, we were waiting for one big company called TOC to float its preference shares before we could rush to buy at www.think1coin.com website. As we were in deep thoughts, the gate man came close to the door saying:

### "I want to know if you people are going home, yesterday you slept here and caused me to sleep at the gate too. Unless you pay me overtime, I am not doing it again."

### The Maasai warrior had turned his work of protecting us into an attack. Madam reached out with some dollars and sent him to buy us credit fast and first. Shockingly, we heard him jump-down the stairway. We noticed that was not his normalcy. We peered through the window, we saw a cheetah fast along Kenyatta Avenue. Madam was startled as she opened the window to get a bird's view. We also neared and saw the guard on his tire sandals running with increasing speed towards where he wasn't sent. When we watched him closely at the intersections, we realized his speed was directing him to Mombasa road where maybe he was going home and decided to disobey. It would take a few minutes to reach Kajiado County on his determination after receiving the dollars. Maybe he thought his journey out of poverty ended in that day. This was true, he never came back.

### Then a song in her purse began; she tried to open more quickly but the zip was so rugged and old. We thereby forcefully listened to the song as she reached the phone in minutes.

X2

My chains are gone  
I've been set free  
My God, my Savior has ransomed me  
And like a flood His mercy reigns  
Unending love, amazing grace

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow  
The sun forbear to shine  
But God, Who called me here below,  
Will be forever mine.  
Will be forever mine.  
You are forever mine

Amazing grace  
How sweet the sound  
That saved a wretch like me  
I once was lost, but now I'm found  
Was blind, but now I see

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear  
And grace my fears relieved  
How precious did that grace appear  
The hour I first believed

My chains are gone  
I've been set free  
My God, my Savior has ransomed me  
And like a flood His mercy reigns  
Unending love, amazing grace

The Lord has promised good to me  
His word my hope secures  
He will my shield and portion be  
As long as life endures

### "Bishop we want to tell you something you may not believe", Hitler began as the pastor responded,

"Mtu wa mungu, you can tell me everything, my wife tells me that you were longing with despairing heart to talk to me. She says you didn't greet her first and she got worried. I am sorry I had to finish doing my gym and take a bath too. I realized I am becoming 'mnono' (plumb) and found a solution in the bible that says 'physical exercise is of some value' so now, tell me, how may I help you?" U

### "Yes reverend", standing in the epicenter of sinners, Hitler began pouring our problems.

### "I want to read you a list of 26 confessions that I, my wife, Mr. Richard and one of their work mate called Mrs. Kalonzo wants forgiven. Number one, my wife confesses that she severally slept and defiled Richard with..."

### As Hitler mathematized the chronological sins, we couldn't gather the strength to look at each other, all were in shamefaced tears listening to what we never thought would be forgiven. I wished there was another easeful way to solve the sin equation. Pythagoras tried his formulas and so did Frobenius. Scientist like Tesla and Michael Faraday tried too and found no answer. All the academic papers and qualifications quantified problems and not solutions that hour. The joy I had in 2019 after graduating from university of Pennsylvania Philadelphia US was shrinking. I doubted whether I really held a masters degree. All I could remember that time was the types and parts of a flame taught in form one in high school, but the fire I was in, needed wisdom to quench. The second wisest man who ever existed in the world also tried to shed some light when he pointed a poetry:

"Vanity of vanities, saith the preacher; all is vanity.

And moreover, because the preacher was wise, he still taught the people knowledge; yea, he gave good heed, and sought out, and set in order many proverbs.

The preacher sought to find out acceptable words: and that which was written was upright, even words of truth.

The words of the wise are as goads, and as nails fastened by the masters of assemblies, which are given from one shepherd.

And further, by these, my son, be admonished: of making many books there is no end; and much study is a weariness of the flesh.

Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.

For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil" V

### King Solomon with all the experience, wealth, wisdom and a combination of seven hundred wives with three hundred side lovers, he also failed like us. Historical kings knew what he failed in when they read the following from manuscripts:

"He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray." W

### The much such a king would do is advice but his character would kill the hope to run the race well.

But what the pastor was offering was an answer to all questions. The main reason that made him right was what he said after listening to the 26th confession.

"Mtu wa Mungu, muko wapi saahii? (Where are you son of God?)

### It was already 5:35 pm in the evening and giving someone our directions could mean all of us would be caught in the government dusk to dawn curfew. But Hitler having been on our side, who could be against us? He has worked well and was respected in the whole country, his name was a snare to the police as well as their masters. When he sent the google location to the vessel of God, we got astonished when we heard the two door-knocks. It was like the pastor was listening outside the hotel. He arrived in a flash. How he travelled from Karen to central business center, a distance of 30 kilometers in five minutes was shocking. I now could believe that Hitler also travelled to hell, it was not just a story.

### In his entrance, the pastor found all our heads down. We knelt down without his request. This time he was carrying the mantle. Without cultural greetings, he proceeded to pray for us in a wholesale manner. Then he got to retail.

Before he could finish on me, he requested me to declare with my mouth after believing in my heart that Jesus Christ is lord and savior; and I couldn't help but I cried out at my loudest voice saying:

"WHOEVER JESUS CHRIST SETS FREE IS FREE INDEED"X

We then said an indelibly wonderful prayer that indeed is now the testimony of whom I am:

"Lord, I am a sinner from the beginning. I was born a sinner without my knowledge. I grew in ignorance but today, with conviction I acknowledge my sins. With my heart I now believe that Jesus the Christ came and died on the cross by the will of God the father. Through the Holy Spirit, Father you have called me back. I denounce my evil acts. I pledge to follow you God who raised Jesus Christ from death. I believe that not even death will separate me from this love in Christ. Fill me with your promised Holy Spirit to lead me, this I ask in the name of the father, the son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen! Hallelujah!!Z

# EPILOGUE

  1. To all who are in sins, all is not lost if you are alive, smile as you read:

### The reason why I wrote this book is to bring anyone like me or "my born again friends" to that confession and comforting assurance of faith. Repeat that prayer if you are a sinner and be convinced that on your own you cannot resist sin. I plead to you to leave your sinful acts and receive the grace to follow Jesus Christ.

If Jesus has right now saved you, I would joyfully like to hear from you. Kindly send a message to this number (0703 256 412) and be rest assured that I will celebrate you, you are now an heir to the kingdom of God. Be assured that God is dwelling inside of you now. The journey you have begun requires fellowship with other genuine saints and we are here for you brother, I am here for you sister, thank you for reading.

  2. "I am born again already Richard, tell me something"

### I lay final exhortations to you, just to tell you two things:

  1. ### Being a Christian is a gift, you need to tell others about it too because the gift is free, free and free indeed and its source is the owner of all things. What do you do? I would mention a million things but I choose to send you to one faithful action. Take this book and send to as many as you desire and save them from death, it is not a command but you can transform it to one.

  2. Love the lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. Do this by daily reading the word and practicing it all the more, don't forget to look after orphans and to avoid evil ways as James says: "the religion that God our father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

  3. To all who have read, smile and read this twice:

### Did this book bless you? Is there anyone you think the content of this book can change their lives? Nothing is too hard for God, nothing at all fellow. Would you do that for me?

Appreciatively help me publish and disseminate this and more books by reasoning with me: "the book costs about 5$ which is about 500 Kenya shillings. But how pleasant it is to receive it online at just a price of ksh. 50?" you can reach out to me on this contact, +2547 11 867 617 or freely do it on my email:MUTHIJIRI6@GMAIL.COM.

  4. Those who haven't read, smile and read this book.

I love you in the lord and so does my master- Jesus Christ who saved me.

# REJOICING#

A

O.......Isaiah 30:21

P.......Proverbs 11:7

Q.......Psalms 121:1-8

R.......1st Peter 2:7

S.......1st Corinthians 6:22

T.......Lamentations 3:21-27

U...............1st Timothy 4:8

V...............Ecclesiastes 12:8-14

W...............1st Kings 11:3

X...............John 8:36

Y...............Romans 10: 4-11

Z.............. Acts 1:8

A......... 1stcor 6:18

B..........Jonah 1:3

C........ Matthew 8:12

D........Mark 10:25

E.........Luke 18:22

F........2nd Timothy 2:2-5

G........Romans 3:23

H.......Isaiah 1:18

I.......Matthew 9:36

J.......Mark 14:36

K.......Philippians 2:10-11

L.......Luke 9:23

M.......1st Timothy 6:10

N.......John 6:48

PPENDIX

Toc QUOTES

