Well very good evening everyone and
welcome to Somerville Chapel for this
memorial service. We very often gather
here for moments of celebration. This
evening a moment of mourning and of
remembrance but also a celebration of a
life lived. I had the pleasure of meeting
Rafa on a number of occasions I knew him
slightly but not well and it's right
therefore that this evening the service
will be led by many among this community
and the various communities gathered
here who did have that opportunity of
getting to know him in an array of
contexts
I know represented among you here are
people who met Rafa through his
Somervillian connections, his connections at
Keeble and Emmanuel College and Hartford
where he sang. The various boat clubs and
other commitments to which he
contributed so fulsomely and
enthusiastically. It is a sad occasion a
mournful occasion but a celebratory
occasion of these coming together of
people who had that opportunity of
knowing Rafa and have words and thoughts
to share this evening. The service will
proceed more or less as announced on the
programmes you picked up when coming in
but there are a number of people who had
words and contributions thoughts they
would like to have heard said this
evening the various reasons were unable
to share them personally therefore after
each of the listed tribute Somerville's
MCR president Kevin will read those
comments and thoughts on behalf of
others. At the end of this service
there'll be a retiring collection and
some details are given on the back of
your programmes and afterwards there is
dinner in the hall but also some
refreshments will be served in the MCR
and you're very welcome to remain behind
and partake of those. I'd now like to
invite the principal to come forward and
formally open this evening's service
My role as Principal of Somerville
is simply to welcome you all to the
college and to say how very sorry I am
for the loss that so many of you and so many
others have suffered of this extraordinary
person Rafa who was so full of life and
had so much to offer and gave so much to
so many of his friends. Colleges and at
least four of the colleges that Rafa
was associated with I believe are
represented here today.
Colleges are places that can offer an
enormous amount where the community can
really come together and help each other
we can help each other to celebrate and
we can provide solace and comfort when
a friend is lost so I am really pleased to
see so many of you here today in
Summerville colleges Chapel and I speak
for the college as a whole in sharing
your sense loss and hoping that we can
be of some comfort to each other as we
both as Brian has said both mourn and
celebrate the loss and the life of a very
very gifted and vibrant individual who
meant so much to so many of you.
Putting together the memories I wanted
to share tonight has not been an easy
task.
Not because there are too few but because
there are so many. I mean Rafa was a guy
who would shave off his moustache in a
silly bet with some posh London
golfers for £500 which he
would then donate to charity.  He was a
guy who would explain to you in detail
why considering the laws of aerodynamics
it is clearly preferable to fight one
horse-sized duck over 100
duck-sized horses. Someone who would come
into the MCR all beaming and excited and
declare that after a wonderful lunch
with the potential supervisor he had now
decided to apply for a DPhil even
though it was the last day before the
deadline.
Who would write his entire DPhil
application literally overnight and get
a place at Oxford.
Rafa was an active part of two choirs and
one boat club. He captained the
university's prestigious second golf
team and MCR's somewhat less prestigious
first croquet team and he still
managed to go to more formal dinners and
black-tie events than anyone else in
this Chapel including the principal.
He was as passionate as he was
knowledgeable about an incredibly wide
range of things and he was always happy
to share this knowledge and passion with
anyone, be they close friends or total
strangers which of course they would
never remain for long. I think when J
Gatsby claims to be an Oxford man Rafa
is the person he has in mind. So it is no
surprise that Rafa is remembered in two
services in Oxford alone and of course
given how much of an Oxford thing it is
to have two services in two different
colleges rather than one we all know
that Rafa would have very much
appreciated it. Whenever I thought about
what to say of the service I came back
to one memory I have of our exchange
dinner with Exeter College. I was sitting
next to Rafa and he was going on and on
about how beautiful the chapel was so
after dinner we went to take a look and
there was a piano standing around and
Rafa just sat down in front of it and
played a beautiful little piece quite
similar to the one we are going to hear
next
and out of nowhere Rafa created this
wonderful Oxford moment that you would
expect to see in the film but never
really hope you could experience in real
life.  The same night Rafa also said
something to me that he would often say
at formal dinners and on similar
occasions involving conversation and
good wine: "Our lives are ridiculous", he would
say and by this he meant ridiculously
good and I think this is what I would
like to remember Rafa for.
His understanding of and appreciation for
every moment of his life. His humility
the generosity with which he shared his
thoughts ideas and passions, the
knowledge that Rafa was one of the very
few people who had somehow managed to be
exactly where he wanted to be doing
exactly what he wanted to do, and the fact
that he was as grateful for it as I am
for having had Rafa in my life as a
friend if ever so shortly.
everyone I'm going to Rend my voice to
Tom Evans who isn't pushing unable to
attend he did however for Monica's alum
of BMC are and he was able to attend the
funeral service dingo val and he wanted
to share sort of his reflections on that
so grace at san vincente
church within a beautiful square and go
bow on a bright evening a vast number of
people came to say good-bye to Rafa the
great spacious church was so full of
many people even many people even had to
stand in the back fact that so many
people were present was indicative of
just how many lives were touched by Rafa
there were tears and pain and yet
despite the utter sadness of losing Rafa
which everyone felt the service
certainly did felt like a celebration of
his life and what an amount there is to
celebrate an amount admire about his
life both before and after the funeral
Rafa's friends from cambridge oxford
bilbao and elsewhere shared jokes and
stories
indeed I wouldn't have expected that we
have so there to have been so much
laughter during that weekend in Bilbao
as many of his friends shared and are
called wonderful joyful mem moments
shared with Rafa while offering my
condolences to his parents and sister
gave him the cards and photos that
reference friends from Somerville as
well as golf team wrote his mother told
me how important such messages would be
for her and how important it was to see
and meet Buffett's friends
I cannot imagine painting the stress of
Eva's family but I believe that letting
them know just how loved and befriended
Rafa was by so many to help them during
this time so if you haven't already I
would invite you to write or get in
touch with Rufus family since message
such messages would mean a great deal to
them
you
you
you
you
my memory of rapper and unique
definitely was can perhaps you best
summed up by our first meeting
well two weeks please my thirst unlocks
it you found myself splashing around
uncontrollably makes a pile of somewhat
hesitant about taking rain as I've been
insured Myesha this is an England part
of that don't work and my friends the
healthy social life my reservation is a
CV proved wrong raffles Coxon up morning
arrived five minutes late something are
later fine to be fairly predictable
slightly hungover achieve senility much
Sharia sherry off to cry the night
before the cripton brogues chinos in a
tweed jacket even the uninitiated like
myself could tell this is part from
conventional boxing attire methods
rather eccentric spandex he seemed
epitomize hysterical oxygen and raise my
hopes that growing an opposite life were
and practically passable this first
encounter also month with getting
involve post Altima breakfast which
should become someone to the magician
traditional later regrets as I always do
for aqua breakfast from this point on at
the last path at the last count the
stood as infinity breakfast and bottled
port these breakfasts are a central part
for our relationship and despite being
postgraduate Rafa would advocate
engaging talk with me and Brady took me
under his way rock was always on had on
hand to offer advice counsel
encouragement and above all and
infectious ability to make myself and
others laugh particularly needed once
when I was worried about reliable 450
died collections involving that after
his birth certification in Cambridge who
is marked with great disappointment by
history said he walks out the first not
too bad for disappointment it was this
compassion commitment loyalty to others
which I'm sure your felt which should
mean and refer to us all since coming to
Oxford rough became both mentor and my
closest friend
Hubert Humphrey once said the greatest
gift in life is friendship and I
received it and although mr. Rockler
greatly I sure I shall look back with
fond memories of the habit times we
spent together as well as being the
central part of my own experience
boxford that was also being the key
member of both above the lights in two
years
excuse me is rose and clocks
despite concerns Keeble this year ruffle
brightens and many many adult and cold
6:30 morning outing regarding actually
very trivial stories
unfortunately mostly stories originated
from the other place well nobody can be
perfect a particular favorite of such
stories was Rapids introduction to the
emanuel school nakatsu archer
particularly winds down river cam when
she became well acquainted with the
banks in town his boatman offered
snapped adviced open quotation cocks and
relies on three key principles this
banks that bank stay between them in all
seriousness raffles commitments both
men's and women's side of the boat club
was not nearly missed by all unlike
safes opportunities thank him for his
help and support over the last two years
as some of you may know Emmanuel College
Boat come from Arthur is fit to the Aviv
which translates his finds away this
perhaps the my drafters approached life
as he managed to balance before of
commitments with the academic choir and
of course the boat club over the last
weeks I've been thinking the best way to
remember after I think it's we best
achieved by embracing its motto amazing
the mostly opportunities spreads away by
making the most of the opportunities
presented to herself in life as we
evaluate the canon gracious lovers week
remember akka through our actions
replicating the values that he plays the
entire in such high regard and embodying
in so many ways I'm now going to lend my
voice to a gem sea break as many of you
did I had the pleasure of knowing Rafa
both through the MCR and the book club
relax also caught the women in every
sign even if it was just in passing it
brightens your day the ability to make
our 6:30 a.m. sessions enjoyable not
just tolerable these are the good in
every situation freezing morning outings
were constantly interrupted because
to take a picture a particularly nice
sunrise or a particularly nice horse or
just himself he was selfless funny kind
intelligent and talented I don't know
whether raka would love me or hate me
losing oh you are seeds words to
describe him I'll do it anyway they
describe as status classes as deemed to
be a much higher standard and Rafa was
just that a higher standard of cocks
he'll go down in history for that Jesus
race a higher standard rower musician
and Oxbridge student
most importantly he was a higher
standard of friend Oxford will be much
less without you Elsa
you
you
so today I thought I would share some
facts about our friend refer that will
help us to celebrate his memory first
and most importantly he snored I know
this because when the both clubs went on
a training camp to Ireland last year I
thought I'll be really clever and
shotgun with the room in our chalet that
had a double pitch that had thought to
myself
of course when rustling arrived that was
the only other sleeping space and as
well as we had to bunk together for a
couple of nights
now that would been fine excessive
effect that he stacked all his Cambridge
here nicked my here which always he
wasn't great and another quickly finally
moment from that training camp which we
heard tonight about how rattle was the
quintessential Oxbridge man and that was
simplified when we took the decision to
visit the campus of Trinity College
Dublin and rasa immediately pops up and
said oh yes you must visit there because
of the closure Orioles as if he's the
kind of guy who walks around with that
kind of knowledge in his head if it's
linked Oxbridge therefore our life it's
classic rattler now all of you will also
know that rustle of rowing and I didn't
know that because I sat behind him the
entire and in fact my one enduring
memory of Russert is the back of his
head because I stared at it for an
entire year and by my count he took part
in exactly 55 0 bumps roses which crazy
convinced to corrode as a TA year but
more than just being a prolific grower
he had a passion and a knowledge which
was infectious and made you excited
about it but top of that he had a
gentleman meanness and a respect and as
an example I'll never forget when we
were bumped by Keeble in chocolate sauce
which was dropped down to a lower
division sort of the big thing yet the
first thing he did was shaft after
congratulations to them because after
the kind of manuals he also spoke about
sports as his waffle that was his phrase
first and the officer can be a stressful
place and hopefully his legacy can serve
as a reminder that we should all take
care of ourselves and take care of
others and sport can be a vehicle for
doing this second facts about Russia and
there's a little story behind us that he
could multitask so last year my parents
came to be with me in Oxford and I said
oh you know I have a friend in Hartford
choir let's go listen to them sing in
their chatter so he went and he met up
with rougher who chatted to my parents
and he opened the door for us so he
could walk over the bridge of sighs and
then we listen to them sing and the
relink so my parents interacted with
rapper for you know a few minutes tops
anyway later that night as we haven't
done that my mom pipes up you know that
Russia Shack he's such a nice guy he's
so talented with his singing to choirs
and his rowing and his golf and your
study in Oxford and it's such an amazing
thing to be able to sing well and you
know while he was in choir today he even
found the time to wink at me
and I thought path of cheese rough and
you've only gone and made my mom fall in
love with you he just nails the whole
world's most desirable man thing you've
got going on for just a moment but I
mean like even at our first ever Boat
Club dinner bill thus console everyone
who was quote-unquote slightly in love
with Rafa and half the club's good
action and now while that is a bit of a
humorous memory there is a message
behind it because it just goes to show
that there are many times of people in
the world especially at Oscars but the
key to standing up is to use those
talents to benefit other people and
that's what Russell got right when he
sang for an audience Wilcox the crew or
coach them or captain's his golf team he
used the talents to bring up others the
third and final fact that a high regard
Russa is that besides Rouen besides both
sides bouquet his favorite sports was
football and I found it out when I asked
around for anyone who wants to join me
in going to watch an Oxford United game
and he came forward he values a chance
to watch a local team and he lacked the
addition and the meaning that football
hasn't written and the sense of
community you feel when you watch a
match to sing along with the chants and
all that and chatting to him he told me
that he could become came from Bilbao
Spain his favorite scene was Athletic
Bilbao which is a very good team they'd
never been out as a the top division and
he was telling you about how it is a
team that focuses a lot on developing
local players from a young age
supporting them and keeping them in the
club until they got good and that
contrasts with other football clubs in
Spain and elsewhere who will often buy
mostly good players using money escapes
they want quickly instead of putting it
putting in the time is time and effort
to invest in people over a long period
of time even when there is a chance they
might not benefit you not to make that
worthwhile and if that is not the
perfect metaphor with which to describe
Russia as a person I don't know what is
seeing the value in other people invest
in them and who knows they might just
surprise me that's something a Thais
certainly have taken away from his last
now that I finished my three facts the
last thing I would like to say is thank
you everyone here and more broadly in
rapid luck thank you because we've heard
today about how Russia was very special
to a lot of people the other side about
that Ruffus friends were very special to
him and knowing that so many people went
to get their time to celebrate them
would have been very special to him and
in my eyes that is the message of memory
of Russia the message we can take away
is that always treat every person around
you as special and try to put a smile on
their face do this because it's a nice
thing to do but also because one day you
might wake up and then not there anymore
goodbye Rafa and row well
last message I'm gonna share here it is
from Anisha and on down to alumni last
year who lived in Wilson with Roth offer
they're using Somerville as well
what makes two people cross paths in
this world some call destiny definitely
some call it karma some say it's just
pure luck so to be honest I'm not sure
if it was destiny
good karma or my luck to have the
fortunate experience living across from
Nava Baptist's death during my Erie
Oxford from our very first meeting was
affable nature sense of humor and
charismatic personality threw us
together his friends despite the
cultural and academic academic
differences we had and when I say
academic differences let me take the
time to clarify that I definitely felt
out of my league when I learned about
all of his astounding
academic accomplishments as a true
Oxford student however roughest
kind-hearted and free-spirited nature
never made me feel insecure rather gave
me the confidence that I found like a
guide and a friend to whom I can turn to
me during my time announcer running him
running into him in the hallway while
doing our laundry cooking or coming back
from class always turned into a long
entertaining conversation during which
we would fill each other with our daily
endeavors and meant about the basic
struggles of student life any time I
opened the door to my room in Wilson
Rafa happened to be in the doorway he
would peer inside and exclaim oh I'm so
jealous of your room you have the
penthouse suite of Somerville his voice
still echoes in my ears as if it was
just yesterday that we ran into each
other I'm a very last night at Oxford
RAF and I sat down over a few bottles of
wine in my room we're looking in
somerville courtyard and talks for over
five hours about every topic Under the
Sun ending the night with a pact that we
would visit each other in due time in
Madrid and San Francisco respectively so
saddened we deeply to know that my time
is such an amazing person has come to an
abrupt end but I just pray that his soul
soul finds peace and comfort
and now we have a lovely little video
that Rafa recorded actually himself that
illustrates his first term here in
Oxford each each day is represented by a
second of the video I'm sure many of you
will either recognize yourselves or the
various places in Oxford and it's just
very indicative of how broad his impact
was on this University and its people
and I guess at this point I'd like to
say a few words on behalf of myself and
enclosing but let me begin first as
Rowan said for thanking you all for
coming and coming together to remember
Rafa's life and how he connected to Saul
I've been both thoroughly impressed and
completely unsurprised
but how many people have come together
to celebrate Rafa in the face of this
tragedy Rafa always seemed uniquely
gifted in his ability to connect with
others and it's become increasingly
evident just how many lives were touched
by his own everyone who knew him seems
to have some personal story or joke they
shared with him the first time I met
Rafa
the memories ingrained in my in my head
likely because exchanged mostly involved
in repeating the words
cheeky nandos over and over much to my
confusion he then went on to tell me a
load of trivia about Oxford and
Cambridge and the various colleges of
each in the traditions and so he's quite
honest on paper it should have been a
relatively boring conversation but it
wasn't he never just did or said he
shade he shared his excitement for
rowing for singing for traditions as
well of course for nice port and sherry
he shared his commitment and his drive
he was of course never short of a pass
to comment to share either he was always
missing fun and attempting to mimics my
American accent and he never failed to
greet me with the jovial and very
over-exaggerated my man and my memories
of him as I'm sure all years are filled
with illustrations of the severe weather
he was yelling at us from a cocking
position or stopping us to take a
picture of the river inviting us to
experience his involvement in the
various flyers for even songs or
bustling in an hour late after singing
at Hereford to reveal the MTR election
results plus I'm sure many of us
remember the
wax in the share Easton as people have
said he's one of the most Oxbridge
people I've ever known and he made me
excited to be here and I like being a
part of his life as much as I enjoy him
in mine he was my colleague my talks on
my friend and you will be missed but he
will not be forgotten and in the spirit
and the in his spirit
I would like to invite all of you to
come join us at the summer to run to go
after the ceremony for a small toast of
sherry in his honor and of course also
to the some of the hall for Sunday roast
you can try one of the many desserts
that drop over so Fonda sampling
you
Oh
Oh
Oh
you
you
