

The Treehouse

By

J. L. Garner

Copyright© 2017 J. W. Garner

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any recording by way of - electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or other - except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published by J. W. Garner
Chapter One

I listened as my mom and dad fought in the front seat of the car. Despite my bad mood, I had to smile. It wasn't a real fight, but one of those in which everything was highly exaggerated, and everyone ended up rolling their eyes or laughing.

"She smiles!" my mom said as she looked back at me. I hadn't been very cheerful in the last few weeks. The world had come to an end, or at least, my world. Everything I knew had been taken from me, and all I had left was uncertainty and fear.

"Did you take a picture?" My dad's voice held an urgency as though my mom had witnessed a once in lifetime event.

I didn't even look at them. I wanted them to understand I was still very upset by our current state of circumstances. I had lived all my life in a small town in New Mexico, and now we were moving to a small town in Missouri. And just when I was getting ready to enter high school. I had looked forward to going to high school with my friends for years, and now I would be going to a high school where I knew no one.

"No, but I have the camera ready in case it happens again," my mom was pointing her IPhone's camera at me.

"Hey, booger butt, give us a Kodak moment." My dad was looking at me through the rear-view mirror. I wasn't in the mood to be teased out of my bad mood yet. I knew he was worried, but I didn't care, because this was way too serious.

As my dad continued to look in the rear-view mirror, the car drifted over and hit the vibrating edge of the highway. My mom immediately responded by telling him that if he wanted to drive on the edge of the highway, just cross the line and drive on the shoulder of the road. My dad pretended to give that careful consideration before suggesting they go a step further and drive in the grass that lined the highway. He began allowing the car to drift in that direction.

"James!" my mom protested. My dad just laughed and re-centered the car in the right lane. His eyes found mine in the mirror again and I gave him a weak smile. I didn't really want to be angry, but it felt better than fear. Anything felt better than fear.

My dad had told me anger was a secondary emotion. It always arose from usually hurt or fear. It was often considered a negative emotion, but it was really very useful as long as you expressed it in the right way. You could hide behind it when you were hurt, worried or fearful and it didn't hurt as much. Sometimes I would build a big wall in front of me, like my anger, and use it to hide behind as well. If you acted like you didn't care, others were less likely to try and get a response from you. It wasn't the greatest, but it worked sometimes.

I once again looked out of the window and I immediately gasped. There was a striking black woman standing there. Her smile was beautiful. I looked behind us to see her again, but I couldn't see her because of the large truck behind us.

"Did you see that?" I leaned forward to grab the back of my mom's seat.

My mom turned in her seat to look at me. "See what, honey?"

"That woman! She was just standing on the side of the road, like right at the edge of the road!"

My mom frowned slightly as she looked to my dad for an answer. "James, did you see someone?"

My dad shook his head with a slightly bewildered look. "No, no, I didn't see anyone." His eyes met mine once more through the rear-view mirror.

"How could you not see her? She was right there! It was a slender black woman with long wavy hair. She had the same color of eyes that I do." I pointed at my own eyes. I had an unusual eye color of a royal blue. It was unusual for my skin color anyway.

My mom was African American and Hispanic and my dad was Caucasian with blue eyes. My mom's beautiful dark skin was just a shade darker than my own. My skin was a light brown but I had the mixed features of the races of both my parents. I was used to getting remarks about my looks and questions about modeling. Everyone thought I was beautiful, but when I looked in the mirror, I could never determine what they thought was beautiful. I wished I didn't look the way I did, because it drew unwanted attention. I hated being the center of attention. I never knew what to say. I just wanted to be left alone by people I didn't know really well, because everything that came out of my mouth seemed stupid or awkward, so I would hide behind my wall. I felt the most comfortable when I was in a situation in which I wasn't expected to say anything.

My dad's voice pulled me back to the moment.

"You said she had blue eyes? Honey, we're going seventy miles an hour. You couldn't possibly have seen her eye color." His voice was gentle and concerned.

"He's right." I thought. I recalled the sight of the woman very clearly, but it would have been only possible if we had been rolling past her. I could see her so clearly in my mind. I even saw the length and color of her dress. I frowned as I looked between my mom and dad. I felt confused. Was I seeing things?

"Perhaps you saw the reflection off one of the big trucks," her mom offered tentatively; "something painted on the side and reflected on the window by all the mirrors... or something with the sunlight?"

I had a brief urge to grin. The looks on their faces indicated they were worried I may be experiencing a hallucination as well as feeling very depressed. I had an urge to begin talking to someone that was clearly not there. I shook my head and just looked back through my window to the lands and trees we were passing. I smiled when I realized whatever had happened had for the first time in weeks driven back the feeling of worry and dread in the pit of my stomach.

My dad must have felt the change in mood because he broke into song, "You take the high road and I'll take the low road and I'll be in Missouri afore ye!"

My mom and I looked at each other and groaned. My dad had a tendency to take any sentence or situation to burst into really bad singing of any song he had ever heard. He winked at me in the mirror, but I just I rolled my eyes.

"Dad, please stop," I begged, not failing to notice the way he purposely mispronounced Missouri – miss our eye – another tendency of his.

"Honey, what about our move has you so anxious? I know you'll miss your friends, but you'll make new ones. You've always had close friends," my dad said.

"That's not true, dad. I didn't have any friends until Elizabeth moved to our school. I'm not good at making friends, but she is. She's the reason we had so many friends," I said, feeling relieved to actually share what was on my mind.

My shy nature is what left me dreading a new school and longing for my friends I had known since the third grade. In my first few years of school, I didn't talk to anyone or have anyone to play with on the playground, but that all changed when Elizabeth moved to my school district. Elizabeth made friends with everyone, but had purposely made friends with the girl that seemed so much quieter than all the other kids. By the time we were in the sixth grade, Elizabeth and I had become close friends with three other girls. I felt invincible with them, like what I felt around my parents and close family. Unfortunately, I had no siblings. My mom had complications when she was carrying me and had been left unable to carry any further children. A younger sibling to share this whole move thing with would have possibly made this easier.

"I don't think that's true, Lilly," my mom said as she looked at my dad in confusion. "You've never had problems talking to people you don't know."

Evidently, my wall was strong, because not even my parents knew how awkward I felt inside. I crossed my arms with a sigh and returned my gaze outside the window. I knew from experience they would never entertain any ideas of me having a serious flaw. They thought I could do anything.

"I don't think you guys are very objective when it comes to me."

"You think we might be bias?" my dad asked in mock astonishment.

"Yes, dad," I said in frustration.

"Did you hear that, Mary? She thinks we're half donkeys - bi-asses!"

I couldn't help the giggle that escaped me.

"Oh gracious, James, what if she's right?" My mom made sure to sound sufficiently worried.

"Well, it could explain why you're so stubborn. You can't help it."

"James, you by far are the most stubborn person I know."

"No, I'm quite certain I'm not stubborn. Even if every single person in the world called me stubborn, I'd never change my mind."

"Dad! You just pretty much defined the word stubborn!"

"No, I didn't."

"Stop!" I said with a laugh.

"Stop! In the name of love! Before you...," he stopped just long enough to point out a sign and say, "Oh look, there's a place up ahead that sells Auntie Qs (antiques)."
Chapter Two

I climbed slowly out of the back seat as I looked at the large white house that was to be my new home. I knew my parents had been excited about me seeing the new house, because it was much bigger and nicer than our old home. The yard was much larger too. It had several large trees in the front lawn. I had to admit it was beautiful, but it didn't look like home. It was too big, and although it was painted a bright white, it looked old.

"What do you think, Lilly?" My dad's eyes rested on me in anticipation of my reaction.

"It's really nice...but big. I mean there are only three of us."

"Yes! This is true!" he said as though I had just come to a wondrous conclusion. "We will fill it up with many friends!"

"Dad, the only real friends you really want are usually of the four-legged, furry kind." My dad was a veterinarian and we had lived with all manner of domestic and wild animals.

"This also is true!" he said as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "I have bought half an ark! We shall have one of every kind!"

I heard my mom groan behind me. We all loved animals, but having a raccoon living in your closet can get more than a little annoying. My dad always called them "my crafty little bandits."

I looked around the neighborhood and the large houses were widely spaced. It was good thing because a zoo had just moved in. I wanted to shudder at the vision of the neighbor's shocked faces.

My mom was digging around in her purse that was the size of a large trash bag. She finally located a key after sticking her arm in up to her elbow. She held it up as if it was a lost and curious object. She began advancing on the house like she was sprinting on a race track. My dad and I scrambled to keep up with her.

It was a difficult task to keep up with my mom. She did every task as though she was competing in a time limited contest. It left my dad and me running for cover at times. Doing the dishes consisted of plates and utensils, at times sharp knives, being thrown in the sink and soap and water flying everywhere. We often had to replace dishes. The dishes, the table, the counter and sometimes the floor were cleaned in the amount of time it would take other people to fully load a dishwasher.

My mom threw open the large front door. As I crossed the threshold, I noticed a long staircase to my immediate left, hugging the wall and stopping on a small landing before turning and continuing in a curve up to the top floor. I looked straight up and the banister and ceiling seemed very far above me. The rest of the house was equally as large. Attached to the large L-shaped foyer were two large rooms and an equally large kitchen with a utility room. A small bathroom was located between what seemed to be the living room and the kitchen. There was a chute by the washer and dryer that could be used to throw dirty clothes from the second to the ground floor. I looked up the chute and gave into a gleeful childish urge and ran for the staircase. I wanted to see where the top of the chute was located.

"She's off, Mary!" I could hear them following me to the bottom of the staircase. "We're going to need to make sure she eats like a buffalo if she climbs the staircase like that every time. I think she could outrun a thoroughbred."

Upstairs, there was another flight of carpeted stairs that must have led to an attic or some third floor. There was another small sitting room, four large bedrooms and two bathrooms on the second floor. I looked into the larger restroom and located the top of the chute. It had a white wooden lid. I opened it and looked far down to the utility room floor.

"Hello?" I yelled down through the chute.

"Hello!" I heard in response.

I heard my dad start to squabble with my mom. "Mary, I told you I didn't want to live in a haunted house. We haven't been here for thirty minutes and you're talking to ghosts! Is it anyone we know? Did they follow us here? What if it's my mom?"

"Your mom is still alive, James." My mom returned in feigned aggravation.

"Oh, that's right. It's probably not her."

I wandered back to look at the bedrooms and immediately recognized my parent's bedroom. It was massive and my parent's large king-size bed looked almost small centered on a wall. We had made a vacation out of our travel to our new home, and all our belongings had been moved by professional movers. My mom had no doubt had very detailed instructions on where to put things. I looked around and briefly wondered what people did with so much space. I imagined us buying more furniture to just fill up the space.

I made my way past the carpeted stair case lining the wall, eyeing it uneasily, to the room on the other side, hoping it would be my room. It was a big house and I didn't want to be all alone. I pushed open the door and looked in shock at the beautiful waterfall that covered the side of one whole wall. It had a wide variety of soft colors made of shades of pink, blue, green, yellow and a glittery white. I had a large bedroom with all new furniture, but all the belongings from my old bedroom were there. I smiled as I looked around. I felt a tinge of guilt as I remembered how I had given my parents the silent treatment at various times in the last several weeks. They knew how difficult this move was for me and had tried to make up for it in so many ways.

My eyes were drawn towards the window. The window was tall and had a cushioned window seat under it. At least, I thought that's what it was. I had only read about them but never actually seen one. I made my way over and found the seat was just the right size to sit and stretch my legs. I was only five feet, two inches tall. I looked into the back yard and there stood a very large tree. Someone had built a fairly impressive treehouse in it. I was fourteen, but who didn't like a treehouse? I looked at it and noticed there had been small wooden boards nailed into the side of the tree. A vision of me and my friends when we were younger playing in the tree made me smile. We would, of course, made a secret club house in which no one under the age of ten would be admitted.

I felt a burning in my stomach as I thought of my friends. I never dreamed I would miss them so much. I pulled out my iPhone and texted Elizabeth about the treehouse. She immediately wanted me to take a picture and send it. After I sent the picture, I pulled my knees up under my chin and rested my head on them. The tree and the whole backyard were beautiful but none of it was mine. I heard the phone ding with a returned text but I didn't look at it. I remembered the conversation I had with my dad when he talked to me about the move. He said that change in life was inevitable. It would happen no matter how much you didn't want it to, and it could bring wonderful things in your life even while you had to say goodbye to old things. I liked old things. They were comfortable and change didn't seem very comfortable at all. It seemed as though all change did was make you aware of how special what you had lost had really been. I was never going to take for granted anything anymore. I had the best friends, the best small town, the best school and the best house in the world, but I just didn't know it until I had to leave them behind.

"Lilly?" I turned to look at my dad. He had a concerned look on his face. He sat on the window seat beside me and hugged my whole wadded body close to his chest. "It will get easier, honey," he said as he kissed the top of my head. I knew that he was right...or would have been right for almost everyone else, but not for me. For me, things were not going to get easier. In fact, they were going to be life-changing in ways I couldn't possibly imagine.
Chapter Three

My heart was pounding in my chest as I looked at the front entrance of the high school. This is the day I had dreaded for weeks. There were students and cars everywhere, and I didn't see one person that looked nervous to be here. Surely, the other freshmen were nervous. I would have been even back home, starting high school was a big deal.

I heard a bell ring and everyone rushed through the front door. I found myself almost trapped in a group that was pushing to get into the building. Surprisingly, this didn't bother me. I was now just another body trying to get into the building.

I knew my way to my first class, because when I registered for school, I walked the entire building and memorized the layout. It was much bigger than it looked on the outside. It had the layout of a structure that had been added onto for years. You took a turn down a hall and found what looked like a labyrinth of hallways to other parts of the school.

I didn't go to my locker because everyone else appeared to be rushing to a classroom. I crossed the strap of my messenger bag over my head. It was heavy and I hadn't planned on carrying everything with me. It would be easier to carry with the weight distributed to both sides of my body.

The classroom I entered was almost completely full. I looked around for an empty seat, and saw a dark-haired boy that already had the shadow of mustache on his face. He looked up and grinned at another boy who walked passed him and my heart did a little flip-flop in my chest. I really hadn't noticed how good looking he was until he grinned, and the grin just seemed to release a bunch of butterflies into my stomach. It made me want to turn in the other direction, but as I did I realized there were only a few seats left and the nearest one was right beside him. He had his head turned and was talking to a group of boys behind him. I walked over and nervously looked at the chair.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" I was almost certain my voice sounded strained.

"Have a seat," he said as he just briefly looked my way.

My heart began pounding again as I realized the group of boys that he had been talking to were staring at me. I saw out of the corner of my eye the dark-haired boy turn and look at me. I wanted to sink down in my chair. I wanted to be anywhere but sitting in that chair.

"Hi, I'm Erick. You new here?" the boy asked in a friendly manner.

"Yeah, we just moved here." I returned in a way I thought would give him an out to dropping the conversation. I was surprised when I saw his hand stuck out between us. I reached over and grabbed it. I was surprised when he firmly squeezed it so I quickly withdrew mine. I didn't want anything going in an intimate direction. Boys that looked like him made me nervous.

"What's your name?"

"Lilly," I said without looking at him.

"Well, welcome Lilly, I hope you like it here," he stated in an adult like manner.

I looked at him quickly to see if he was mocking me, but he just smiled and then bent down to pull a book out of his backpack. I opened my backpack and realized every pencil and pen was gone. I rolled my eyes when I realized they were probably under the floor board in the dining room. It was my dad's spider monkey's favorite hiding place for stolen objects.

The teacher came in and began talking, so everyone's attention turned to the front of the classroom. I couldn't decide if I was disappointed or relieved that Erick didn't say anything further to me. The teacher moving back and forth in front of the classroom allowed me to keep him in my peripheral vision almost all hour.

When the bell rang, Erick put his book back in his backpack and was one of the first people to leave the room. I looked down at the course syllabus and realized I hadn't read one word about the Geometry class. I waited while a couple of students passed my desk before I got up to leave.

"What's your name, beautiful?" It was one of the boys in the group that had been talking to Erick. Several other boys stood behind him, laughing as they talked to each other behind their hands. I rolled my eyes. This type of attention I was used to handling.

"It's Lilly," I said tersely before quickly turning to walk out of the room. The boy turned to the boys behind him and shoved one of them, telling them to shut up.

I decided to go to my locker and deposit the majority of my messenger bag. I took the geometry book and several other books out to lighten my load. The hallways were crowded with people walking to their next class and small groups of friends clustered around lockers talking. I looked around to see if I could see Erick, but I didn't see him anywhere. I talked to myself in my head, reminding myself that just because he had said hello and welcome, didn't mean he was interested in me. It was just as well, because I couldn't imagine being anything but tongue-tied around him.

The rest of my morning classes passed in a blur. Evidently, the school was large enough that not every new student was noticed. There had been a few people ask me my name and where I was from, but I was relieved that it didn't appear as though the word "new" was painted on my forehead. It appeared all the freshman were considered new.

It was lunch time I dreaded the most. I didn't know anybody and hoped I could find a seat where I didn't have to sit at a table by myself. I paid close attention to identifying other freshmen so that I would be sitting with my class. I knew most schools had unwritten rules about who could sit where. The last thing I wanted to do was draw unwanted attention from an upper classman. Fortunately, when the time came I saw another girl that I knew was a freshman, and I followed her into line to get a tray. I had noticed that she hadn't really been talking to anyone all morning either. She had been in a couple of my classes, but she had kept her head bent, studying whatever she had in her hands.

The girl was very slim with blonde hair and blue-green eyes. She was an inch or two taller than myself, and she looked as lost as I felt. She glanced at me as I walked up behind her in line. I noticed she was looking uneasily at a large group of students in the back of the lunchroom. I could tell by looking they must be juniors or seniors. They had that air of confidence and familiarity among them. I decided I would follow the blonde girl.

"Are those seniors?" I asked the blonde girl as she once more looked behind her with unease. She looked at me in surprise before nodding her head yes.

"I hate them," she whispered but then immediately looked scared. "I mean...you're not a senior, are you?"

"Nope, I'm just a freshman," I said, hoping to keep a little bit of conversation going. As I looked again I got a sinking feeling in my stomach when I noticed Erick sit down.

"You must be new. I don't remember you from middle school."

"I am, so I was kind of hoping I could sit with you." I was surprised when her eyes lit up and she smiled.

"Sure, you can sit with me. I don't know very many people either. I was new last year and it's kind of hard to make friends around here."

"What's your name?" I asked, encouraged by her enthusiastic response, but a little confused to discover this wasn't her freshman year.

"Sara, what's yours?"

"Lilly," I said with a smile. "So, you don't have any friends from last year?"

A look of hurt crossed her face as she looked nervously at the students close to us. "Not anymore," she whispered.

I wondered where the hurt had come from but I just whispered, "Well, we both have one friend now."

"Really?" she asked.

"Absolutely," I confirmed.

"You can change your mind later if you want to," she said quickly.

"Why would I want to do that?"

She looked behind her at the seniors again. "Some of the senior girls don't like me, and I guess it kind of makes it hard to be my friend."

"That's not the way I think, Sara," I assured her. We handed our trays to the kitchen staff so they could fill them.

She shrugged her shoulders as her tray was handed back to her. "It's okay if you do. I will understand."

"I won't." I looked around the lunch room. "Where should we sit?"

"Let's go sit by the other freshmen. I'll show you who to avoid and who's pretty nice."

I grinned at her grouping of "avoid" and "pretty nice" as she led me to the freshman area. I was going to like her. We sat down next to a group of boys and girls who all appeared to feel excited about being in high school. Some of them looked over and said hello to us.

"All of the people at this whole table and the one next to us are interested in sports or have big brains. They get all A's and they are nice to almost everybody, but you can't actually be in their group unless you're already in it," Sara whispered as she motioned to the table next to us.

"Check! Sports and brains!"

"That table over there is filled with people that get in trouble a lot. They smoke and drink and they start fights, but they're not all mean or anything, but it's a risk." The look of hurt crossed her face as she pointed to the table on the other side of us. "Those people are okay. They like all kinds of things. They'll be your friend if they like you. You don't have to make all A's or anything."

"But they can stop being your friend if they decide they don't like you," I guessed.

"Well, kind of. Sometimes they just don't know what to do, so they just don't talk to you anymore."

I noticed her eyes had looked over my shoulder to the large group of seniors again. I slowly turned and looked at them again. Erick was sitting on one end talking to another boy I had never seen before. I watched as the boy who had spoken to me this morning approached Erick to say something. Erick smiled and said something and the boy returned to another table.

"So, those are all the seniors?" I asked.

"Some of them are juniors. There are a few juniors that all the seniors like, but then almost everyone likes them."

"Do you know that Erick guy?" I asked as she watched the table.

I was unprepared for her response. She reached across the table and grabbed my hand.

"Don't talk to Erick, Lilly," she warned. "He's a junior and you can talk to most of them, but not Erick!"
Chapter Four

I looked at Sara in surprise. That was a fairly vehement response. The two girls sitting near us looked at Sara uneasily.

"Why?" I asked quietly. "What's wrong with Erick?"

"It's not him. It's... "Sara broke off suddenly. I heard a high feminine laugh as a tall, willowy brunette walked by our table. I thought Sara was going to dive underneath the table.

"What is it, Sara?"

Sara slowly brought her finger up in a shushing motion. Her eyes followed the tall girl as she made her way back to a senior's table. I watched the brunette link her arm through a tall boy's arm as she once again laughed at something he said. They sat down at the senior's table and began to talk to the other occupants.

"Who is that?" I whispered.

Sara leaned in close across the table. She looked at the two girls sitting close to them before saying, "That's Shelby and she's why you can't talk to Erick. She has liked him for a very long time but he doesn't like her. I think he's seen how mean she can be."

I couldn't help it. I slowly turned and watched as the beautiful brunette flirted with every boy around her. Sara was right; she could see Shelby's eyes following every move Erick made. Erick didn't appear to know she was even there. She talked to the other boys but her eyes often shifted to Erick.

"You are really pretty, Lilly." I turned back around when Sara spoke to me.

"Thank you and so are you, Sara," I said with a smile. I was surprised when an almost haunted look flashed through her eyes. Her eyes returned to her tray.

"Sara, are you all right?"

She nodded her head but remained silent. I felt as though I had walked into the middle of a movie and was trying to figure out what was going on. Sara began picking at the food on her tray. I wanted to say or do something to help her to feel better, but I was at a loss of what was going on. I reached down and pulled my class schedule out of my bag.

"I wonder if we have any classes together?" I put my schedule down on the table between us.

Sara's eyes again lit up. She reached down and quickly pulled her schedule out of the front pocket of her backpack. She placed it by mine.

"Look, Lilly, we have our sixth hour together. It's Communication Arts I! We can walk there together after lunch." Sara's voice sounded like it did when we discussed becoming friends. I felt relief for getting past the awkward moment.

It wasn't long until the bell rang. I watched as Sara nervously kept her eye on Shelby as she gathered her backpack, dumped her tray and prepared to walk to sixth hour. I reached over and linked my arm with hers. I felt like I was comforting the new student. Sara looked at me in surprise before she smiled and tightened her arm around mine. We turned to go and ran right into Erick.

"Whoa," Erick said as he reached out to steady me. "Hey, Lilly. Sara." He nodded his head towards her and Sara immediately looked at her feet. He had a questioning look on his face before he turned back to me to make eye contact. "I wanted to see how your first day was going? It looks like you've already made a friend. What's your guys' next class?"

I felt my heart skip a beat. His grin felt a like a magnet, pulling me towards him. I couldn't believe he had actually come over to talk to me.

"We have Communication Arts I," I said quickly. "Have you taken it yet?"

"Ugh, yes, unfortunately, I have to take it again. I was out of school for too long last year with a football injury," he said with a look of aggravation. "Can I tag along with you two?"

"Yeah, we don't mind, do we Sara?" Sara was flushed but shook her head no as she continued to look at the ground.

"Erick, are you giving these two freshmen a hard time?" Shelby was standing before us with her hands on her hips. Sara's grip on my arm became painful, and I could feel her trembling. For some reason, it made me want to hold on to her even tighter.

"Erick is always giving someone a hard time." It was the boy that had hit on me in first hour. I felt dread begin to form in my stomach.

"Look who's talking, Jacob," Erick said as he shook his head. "I'm just trying to be a good citizen and treat our new student and our friend Sara with courtesy. Have you guys met Lilly? Can I help it that in doing my duty it just has to be two very pretty girls?"

He reached over and put an arm around both me and Sara. I saw a brief look of anger cross Shelby's face before she hid it behind a look of pretended amusement. Oh, I thought, that's not good.

"Oh Erick, don't tease them. They'll take you seriously. You really are too nice," she said with about the sixth fake laugh I had heard from her that day.

"Really Shelby?" Erick said with raised eyebrows. "This from the girl who called me a freak all through the fifth and sixth grade."

Again, with the laugh. "Honey, you know I was kidding you. You liked to talk about the ghosts and ghoulies all the time."

"Yeah Shelby, you were a bitch to about everyone at some time or another, but I didn't take it personal, because you're just so cute," Jacob piped in and tried to place an arm around her, which she immediately shoved off.

The anger wasn't as quickly covered this time. She glared at him before turning deliberately to stare at Sara. I could literally feel Sara shaking now.

"Wait a minute," Shelby began, "didn't Sara have quite the crush on you last year, Jacob? I'm pretty sure I can remember her following you around whenever she saw you. Did you two ever get together?"

I felt Sara recoil as though she had been struck. She dropped her backpack and ran. I watched in shock as she began pushing her way through people. I could see she was crying.

"What the hell?" Erick said, as he watched Sara running from them. "What was that all about, Shelby?"

I saw the look of satisfaction cross Shelby's face. Erick was looking at me as though maybe I knew what was going on. I glared at Shelby as I slowly bent to pick up Sara's backpack. I walked away and began moving quickly in the direction I had watched her go. I heard Erick yell my name behind me, but I was determined to find Sara.

Sara had been slowed down by the students exiting the cafeteria. I had almost caught up with her when she slid her slim body between a group of girls, and I had to stretch on to my toes to see which direction she turned. It was very unlikely she was going to our next class. I knew I was right when I saw her turn towards a short hallway, which led to some restrooms. I was prepared to begin pushing my way through the crowd again when someone from behind grabbed my arm.

"Lilly, what's going on? What's wrong with Sara?" Erick was looking at me with what appeared to genuine concern.

"I don't know, Erick. They're your friends. You should know more about it than I do."

"I swear, I don't. I don't even know what upset her."

"Well, I think it's fairly apparent that Shelby embarrassed her by saying she had a crush on Jacob. Not everyone would welcome that being announced to the world." I could hear the aggravation in my voice.

"Give me your bags, Lilly. I'll save both of you chairs in Communication Arts. Something else is wrong. Last year her crush on Jacob didn't embarrass her at all," he said as he slid my bag off my shoulder and reached for Sara's backpack.

I searched his face and he seemed to truly care that Sara may be upset. It kind of surprised me, because it seemed to me boys seldom acknowledged feelings. I shook my head and turned to push my way through to the restroom.

When I reached the restroom door, I had to step back as two girls exited. They were talking about some class that I didn't even recognize, but I did realize they weren't talking about an emotional girl. I glanced around at several girls still in the restroom, but I didn't see Sara. The bell rang and the girls made their way out of the restroom. I stood back as the last one went out the door. Sara wasn't with them.

"Sara?" I whispered as I began looking under the stall doors. I could see no legs underneath the doors, so I must have guessed wrong on her destination. I knew I was going to be late to class, but I had to find her. Something told me it was very important. I moved quickly back to the restroom door but stopped when I heard a faint sound of crying. I went back to the bathroom stalls.

"Sara? Where are you?" I began pushing open every stall door. I was almost to the last door when I found a door that wouldn't open. "Sara, it's Lilly. Please open the door."

"Lilly?" I heard her whisper my name. I waited while she slowly stepped down from the toilet and opened the door. "You followed me?"

"Of course, I did. You were upset. What is it? Was it Shelby saying that about Jacob?"

Her face crumbled and she covered it with her hands. She shook her head no.

"I'm just stupid, Lilly. I was so stupid," she said through her sobs.

"What makes you think you were stupid?"

"Don't trust them, Lilly. Don't ever trust Shelby." She attempted to wipe her eyes with her sleeves. "I'm supposed to be a sophomore this year, but I couldn't take it. Now I have to do the whole year over and it's just because I was so stupid."

"I don't understand, but something tells me you're not stupid. What happened Sara?"

"Please, don't make me tell you that, Lilly, not ever," she pleaded. "Just trust me. Don't trust Shelby or any of her friends."

"Did Shelby do something to you?"

She turned away from me and began wiping her eyes again. I felt at a loss of what to do. She seemed so fragile, but I couldn't help her if I didn't know what was going on. I watched her as she made her way over to the mirror and tried to fix her hair before wiping at her eyes again. She was trying to pull herself together, but her skin was so fair that it would be hard to hide the redness around her eyes. I felt so sad for her. She would never be able to wipe away the pain that could be seen in her eyes. She took a deep breath before turning to look at me.

"We better get to class. Hopefully, the teacher won't say anything." She stopped when she realized I wasn't carrying anything.

"Erick took our bags. He said he would save us a seat." I saw some apprehension return to her eyes. "Is that okay? We don't have to sit by him if you don't want to."

She grinned. "Erick is one of the good guys...but I know Shelby won't be happy if your friends with him. It's okay for me now, because she knows Erick doesn't like me in that way."

"I don't think I'm going to care very much about what Shelby thinks," I said as I opened the restroom door.

"Just remember what I said and don't trust her. I can already tell she's not happy about Erick talking to you, so be ready for her little games."

"Great," I said sarcastically. "My first day of school and I've made an enemy of the village idiot."

Sara laughed. I was surprised I wasn't really worried. Bullies can make school hard, but for some reason, I felt as though I needed to be strong for me and Sara. I felt a connection with the girl I had never experienced before. I really didn't know anything about her, but I knew she needed me.

As we got closer to the class, Sara began to get nervous about entering the classroom late. I knew she was worried the teacher would question us about our tardiness. I tried to think of something flippant to say that would make her feel more at ease, but as I rounded the corner of the hall, I came to a complete stop. We came face to face with the beautiful black woman I had seen on the side of the highway on our way to Missouri. I had remembered every detail.
Chapter Five

The woman stood directly in front of our classroom door. She reached out and placed her hand on my shoulder as she opened the door for us. I couldn't help it. I was speechless. How was this possible?

"It will be fine," she assured us quietly. "You will find no trouble for your delay."

I felt Sara tug on my hand. "Come on, Lilly, we have to go."

Sara was pulling me forward but I couldn't take my eyes off of the woman. Her smile overwhelmed me with a feeling I had never experienced before. She lifted her hand in a small wave of farewell and look of reassurance before she slowly walked away from the door.

"Lilly, sit down," Sara whispered urgently.

I realized I was standing by a desk that had my bag on it. I removed it, looked around and slid into the chair. The teacher was talking and appeared to not even notice we had walked in five minutes late. Erick was looking at me with concern. I smiled and turned once more to look at the door.

"Are you okay?" I heard Erick whisper beside me.

"Who is that teacher?"

"That's Mr. Randell. He's pretty cool," he replied.

I shook my head no. "No, the teacher at the door. The one who opened the door for us."

Erick had a surprised look on his face. Oh no, I thought, he didn't see her. Not again! Am I going crazy? I turned to ask Sara, but he answered me before I could.

"Do you mean Eva?" he asked hesitantly. "The black woman?"

"Yes," I said with relief. "She told me we wouldn't be in trouble for being late."

"She met you in the hall?"

"Yes," I replied. "Is there some reason she shouldn't?" His expression was causing me to feel uneasy. It must have been apparent because he immediately changed his tone.

"Not at all, Lilly." I could see he was attempting to console me. "She just doesn't talk to very many people. She only helps kids that are having a really hard time. Are you having a hard time?"

I shook my head no. I shrugged my shoulders, wondering if she could have overheard what Sara and I had been talking about.

"Is she a counselor or something?" That would explain her words of assurance when she met us at the door. Maybe she did know what was going on with Sara. She had known I was running interference and had prepared the teacher for our being late. She definitely knew how to put people at ease when things were rough, her mere presence did that.

"Kind of, but she tries to keep things really private, so most people won't admit to talking to her. She doesn't talk to many people, because she knows if she talks to someone, others may figure out they have some kind of problem."

"Ooh, I see," I said as if I understood, which I really didn't at all. Counselors at my old school talked to students about all kinds of things. I'm sure they had helped students with all kinds of problems, but no one ever appeared to be ashamed to have talked to them.

At the front of the class, Mr. Randell raised his voice in an attempt to gain everyone's attention. He was passing out a list of books we were going to be reading. I had read several of them so I was happy to see we were going to be given a choice on the books we read. I had already been given several homework assignments, so if I needed to, I wasn't above taking a short cut and choosing one I had already read. Behind my wall, I cringed when I thought how it could be considered cheating. I quickly justified it as being okay, because the teacher just wanted them read. It didn't say pick one you haven't read.

Erick had a painful look on his face and I guessed reading wasn't exactly his favorite pastime. When I looked at Sara, she was gnawing on a fingernail as she nervously inspected the list. This was her and Erick's second time for taking the class, so I imagined the three of us picking the same books so we could discuss them. I liked the idea so I circled a few books that would be fun for us to work on. I hoped I could change Erick's mind about reading. It wasn't until Mr. Randell announced we would be expected to give a short speech to the class about the book we picked to read that I also became unhappy. Reading could be very enjoyable, but talking in front of the class could be extremely painful. We all sunk down in our seats a few inches as we looked at each other to express our mutual agony.

When the time to leave class came, I made plans with Sara to meet with her by my locker after school. I wanted to meet Erick too, but was too afraid to ask him. Erick seemed to be pretty popular, so I assumed he would be surrounded by people who wanted to talk to him. He had already surprised me by paying so much attention to me. I made a note in my head to ask Sara what she thought about that after school.

My last class of the day was physical science. I liked some science classes, but as I flipped through the book, it seemed like I was looking at something that was written in ancient Greek. I looked around in dismay and was relieved to see that others had confused looks on their faces as well. This class was going to be a nightmare. I wondered if I could get away with saying the subject caused me allergies or something, and I had no choice but to switch classes. I closed my eyes with a sigh a moment later when the teacher announced the class was a required class for freshmen.

The bell finally rang and I crammed the nightmare science book into my bag. I made my way out into the hall and began weaving my way around people to reach the hall where my locker was located. Hopefully, Sara would be waiting for me. I never dreamed I would be so lucky to find a possible friend on my first day – maybe two.

I rounded the corner of the hall and above the noise of everyone talking I heard someone calling my name. I looked around and saw Shelby with a group of senior girls. One of the girls was holding a cell phone up and snapped a picture of me. Shelby waved as she yelled something about "annoying freshmen girls" that made everyone around her laugh. I rolled my eyes before I turned and picked up my pace down the hall. The last thing I wanted was to be caught in the middle of a group of senior girls.

Sara was waiting by my locker. I noticed Eva was standing with her and hoped Sara could tell me something about her. It was just so strange that I had somehow seen her on the highway one day and now she had turned up at my school. I didn't know what to think about it. I had decided I must have seen some kind of reflection or something that day, but now, here she was, looking exactly like I remembered her. How could it be? How could every detail of her seem familiar when I had seen her going seventy miles per hour down the highway? I had already decided not to share that part with Sara or Erick. My mom had told me her mom had seen things others couldn't, and although Erick apparently could see her, it caused most to feel uncomfortable.

"Hey!" Sara said with a smile. There was just something about the girl that was endearing to me. It was like a little sister or something even though she was almost a year older than me.

"Hey, how was seventh hour? I have a nightmare of a class," I said as I pulled my nightmare science book out of my backpack.

"Oh, yuck! I have to take that again too. It's probably the most traumatic class in high school.

"Geez, I was afraid of that."

"Hey now, don't be dissing the sciences. It was one of my favorite classes when I was a freshman."

I turned in surprise to see Erick standing behind us. My heart did a little flip-flop in my chest.

"Okay, then Erick Mchail, it is your humanitarian duty to help me and Lilly pass this class," Sara said as she reached up to pat him on the shoulder.

I watched his reaction out of the corner of my eye. I kind of expected him to say he would, but then his junior status would probably keep him from actually doing it. I didn't blame him. I knew there were unwritten rules about upperclassmen hanging around lowly freshmen.

"I do hereby pledge my assistance to those trying to survive the trials and tribulations of physical science," he stated in a manner that reminded me of someone devoting their life to the peace corp. "We will prevail! "

Sara and I laughed at his overly-dramatic statement. I found myself really hoping he would spend some time with us. Sara appeared to believe him or maybe she was just used to Erick saying things in that manner to tease her.

"Hey, I can help with Communication Arts. I've read like three or four of the books on that list. I'm like a walking and talking version of Cliff Notes."

Erick put his arm around Sara. "Sara, we have just found our ticket through Randell's class!"

Sara jumped when Erick's arm touched her and she backed away. We both looked at her with surprise. Her own face was surprised as she realized how she had jumped. It had been like a reflex. She shook her head and smiled.

"This is turning out to be the best day I've had in a long time," she said as she walked over and grabbed Erick's arm. Erick's head was tilted as he looked at her in confusion.

I already knew something was wrong so I tried to cover for her. "Of course, that doesn't help with the speech we have to give."

We all groaned at the thought of getting up in front of the class. I was a little surprised that Erick seemed to be dreading it. He seemed so confident.

"You know," Erick began, "I had a friend last year who told me he just pretended to be an actor when he got up there. Forget who you are and pretend you're an actor that has to tell his audience about some great story. Of course, I never really got to try it out, because I was out for most of the year with my football injury."

"What exactly happened, Erick?" Sara asked.

He paused, looking at her, but staying quiet. He slowly reached out and placed his hands on her shoulders and bent his knees to look her straight in the eyes. "That's not important. Where did you disappear to? We've been worried to say the least."

Somehow, I didn't think he was referring to the restroom incident. I looked back and forth between the two of them. I was missing something.

"Not now, Erick," she said as she glanced nervously around her.

Erick slowly straightened up, but he had a look in his eye that seemed to belong to someone much older than himself. He really cared about her. I wondered if Sara had misinterpreted the feelings he had for her. I couldn't help but feel a little disappointed, and then felt ashamed of myself for feeling so.

"Okay," he said as he stepped back a pace and placed his hands on his hips, never breaking eye contact with her.

"Your injury?" Sara asked again.

"Well, it was one of North County's, our biggest rivals, players who decided he would take me down as quickly as possible. He was a little overzealous and I ended up with a bad neck and leg injury. I'm going to skip football this year, but I plan on running in track next semester if the doctor clears it."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Erick. I didn't know," Sara said. "I should of...come back to see you."

"Someone told me you were out of school for a long time too, Sara." He wasn't ready to let his earlier question go all together. I felt a sudden urge to shield her.

Sara began looking at her feet. She looked up at us with a weak smile and a shrug of her shoulders.

"I wasn't feeling very well. I had to go to the hospital for a little while," she said quietly.

I saw the look of confusion on Erick's face. He began to say something further but I fell back a couple of steps, pulled on the back of his shirt and shook my head no. Fortunately, Sara didn't notice and Erick seemed to get the hint.

"Oh, well I'm glad you're feeling better," he said with a smile.

Sara's problems reminded me of Eva. Sara hadn't really told me anything about her problems, so I couldn't ask without her thinking I was talking about her.

"That reminds me, Sara, do you know Eva?"

This time it was Erick that tugged on my shirt. It almost caused me to fall back a step. He was shaking his head "no" rather vigorously.

"Uh, I mean uh...Evelyn."

Sara frowned as she appeared to be trying to think of an Evelyn she knew. I quickly decided how I was going to cover.

"No, I don't know an Evelyn. Is she a student?"

"I don't know. I just heard someone talking about her. That she was really nice or something." Erick grinned so I knew he thought I had covered well enough. I wasn't as sure because going from Eva to Evelyn was little too obvious.

"Are you two riding a bus home?" Erick asked.

Sara immediately shook her head. "No, I don't ride the bus anymore. I just live over by the Kennedy preschool and I'd rather walk."

"You live by the little school?" I asked excitedly. "I only live about two blocks from there. I'll walk with you."

"You're kidding?" Erick asked with surprise. "I only live a block away from the preschool. Well, it looks like we're all hoofing it! Let me go get a book out of my locker and I'll meet you guys at the front door."

I was shocked. First, one of the most popular boys in high school talked to us all day, and now he was planning to walk home with us. I heard Sara laugh beside me as I watched him quickly walk away.

"Really, Lilly?" Sara asked with a smile. She began digging around in her purse and pulled out a little mirror. She held it up in front of my face. I saw my own blue eyes looking back at me.

I just shook my head. It seemed to me that he had more of an interest in Sara, which I had to admit made me a little jealous, but I was already attached to Sara so I would have to learn to live with it.

"I'm a little worried about Shelby." The haunted look had returned to her face. "She won't like this at all."

"Sara! You need to look in the mirror yourself. I think Erick likes you more than me."

"Yuck, not me!" She had a look of disgust on her face. "Erick and I played in each other's kiddie pools when we were little. He's been like a brother to me since we were three. I think he's actually like a third cousin or something. Oh!" She continued as she shook her head. "That's right! I remember my dad saying they had moved over to Oak Street."

I felt my heart accelerate slightly. "Can I tell you a secret then?"

Her eyes lit up with humor. "I can't imagine what it would be?"

"You have to admit, cousin or not, he's like really nice looking."

"Yes, he is. I have watched girls moon over him for several years now." She rolled her eyes. "He is one of the good guys, Lilly, but I don't think he's spending extra time with me, because he's just being friendly and we've known each other a long time."

"Really?" I couldn't help but mimic her response at lunch time.

We began walking towards the front door, which gave me plenty of time to grill her about Erick. I had a million questions and she patiently answered every one of them. She even offered information I wouldn't have thought to ask yet. She seemed to feel excited because I was excited. I kind of loved her for that. If I hadn't felt a connection with her before, I would have known then we were destined to be best friends.

As we waited by the front door for Erick, we moved on to asking questions about each other. We seemed to have a lot in common. I just couldn't believe how well my first day had gone. I had made two new friends my first day that made me feel like I was accepted and belonged – two highly valued feelings. The fact that Erick may want to be something more than friends was like a daydream. A very good-looking, intelligent guy interested in me!

Our good feelings were slightly tarnished when we heard Shelby coming up the hall. Of course, she was loud and laughing and talking to Erick! I quickly checked myself. I didn't even know for sure if Erick was interested in me yet, so I couldn't be acting like a jealous girlfriend; besides my dad had told me jealousy was more about control than love. He said that if a person felt the need to control the person they loved, it was about control and not love and they were abusing the love given to them. So, if Erick wanted to be with Shelby, he would be with her and there was nothing I could do to change that, and I didn't want to be with someone who wanted to be with someone else.

I was thinking about what my dad had said, but couldn't help but feel happy when I noticed the look on Erick's face. He wasn't enjoying Shelby. Despite the wise words of my dad, my heart soared when I saw him pull his arm away from Shelby. I would think about jealously and control another day.

I saw that Jacob and his friends were behind Shelby and literally felt the tension in Sara as she moved closer to me. I reached and grabbed her backpack before she just dropped it again. I moved to place myself into the line of vision between Shelby and her friends. I was determined to eventually find out what happened there.

Jacob moved up next to me to show me he was looking at his phone. I heard Sara's phone ding in her purse. Jacob looked at me with a smirk.

"Nice picture, Lilly!" he said as he laughed and waved his phone in the air.

"What are you talking about now, Jacob?" Erick's voice was angry. Jacob hesitated a little before shrugging his shoulders and leaving. He wasn't laughing anymore and looked slightly nervous.

I heard Sara say, "Oh no" beside me. I watched as she dug her phone out of her purse. She looked at her phone and gasped, holding her phone close to her chest. I got a sinking feeling in my stomach.

"What is it?" I asked her. I became aware people were looking at their phones and laughing.

"What did they do?" Erick asked as he turned to glare at several people that were laughing.

I reached out and took Sara's phone from her. I gave her a look that pretty much relayed the inevitability of me seeing it. It was a picture of me posted by Shelby on Instagram. They had taken the picture of my head and placed it on a naked body standing in the school hall. It said, "The freshman girl couldn't decide what to wear on her first day of school."
Chapter Six

"Erick! Erick, stop it!" I was trying to get a hold of Erick's arm as he held the front of the shirt of a boy holding a copy of a picture posted of me on Instagram. In Erick's rage, he held the boy on the tips of his toes as he shook him by the collar. This had become almost a daily occurrence since Shelby had the first picture posted several months ago. Shelby had gone on to post my face on other bodies in a vulgar manner. They had traveled everywhere on the internet and some people had made paper copies, which regularly showed up at the school posted in different areas. Just when I would think it had passed, it would be brought up again with a new picture.

Despite the ongoing harassment, Erick, Sara and I had fallen into a regular routine of spending our time at school and after school together. We had to deal daily with the pictures everywhere, and Erick was getting angrier every day, which caused Sara to have a meltdown, shaking and crying. In truth, I was more concerned about the two of them than me. It was more than obvious that the naked bodies were not mine, but people had latched onto the pictures as a means to relieve the boredom of school life.

My parents had made multiple calls to the school, trying to get the bullying and harassment stopped, but school personnel had done next to nothing about it. They had given the excuse that they had no proof of any one person starting and/or instigating the daily problems. They refused to release any names of the students involved on the basis of breach of confidentiality. More or less, it saved them the time and trouble of actually dealing with the issue. They suggested we let the matter go and it would die down on its own. They were wrong. It was just getting worse.

Of course, Shelby had claimed she was completely ignorant about how the whole thing had happened. It had become evident that Shelby's parents were influential in the community so she was fairly untouchable. The one thing she hadn't thought about is the effect it would have on Erick. We had become good friends and he hated Shelby now...and she hated me for him feeling so. She never missed a chance to cause me emotional pain or humiliation. What really upset me was when she would go after Sara. Neither Erick nor I had found out what she had actually done to Sara last year, but we were firmly convinced now Shelby was behind Sara's fragile state, and it was very clear now that Jacob was involved in some way as well.

I was really surprised about how I felt about the whole matter in relation to me. It was just a nuisance, which caused me some stress. When I first moved here, I felt socially awkward and insecure, but Erick and Sara had changed that. The three of us had developed an unusually close bond, which had led me to an inner strength that I didn't know I had. People were constantly trying to knock me down, but it just did the exact opposite; it made me want to fight back and sometimes the best way to fight back was just to not give them the power to upset me. This infuriated Shelby to no end. It infuriated a lot of people. At first, it made them try harder to upset me, but after a while, they gave up. It wasn't giving them what they wanted – a reaction. I had tried to explain it to Erick and Sara, but it really was something easier said than done. I knew because I tried to feel the same thing when they went after Sara or Erick, or when the issue upset my parents, but it didn't work for me then. They were hurting people I cared about, which hurt me and led me to react in anger. Again, I realized how anger was a secondary emotion that almost always arose from hurt.

Erick was getting out of control today. I jumped in surprise when I saw him pull back his arm to throw a punch at this kid called Cody. I placed myself between them and placed my hands on each side of Erick's face.

"Please, Erick, don't do this! You're scaring me!" Erick almost recoiled in shock. I knew one of the last things he wanted to do was further hurt or scare me. He released Cody with a little shove and Cody took off running down the hall. I sighed in relief. The last thing I wanted was for Erick to get suspended for fighting. It didn't matter who started it, what started it or even if you were defending yourself against violence; the end result was always the same - the Juvenile Office would get involved, which could lead to legal issues of various kinds.

Erick noticed the look of relief on my face and he hugged me close to him. Sara came running over and we pulled her into the hug as well. Down the hall, I saw Eva watching us. She shook her head in approval. She had been staying close to the situation, but it didn't appear there was a lot she was able to do, because evidently school administration was not working with her. She occasionally showed up to comfort and encourage me. Evidently, she thought I was more help for Sara than she was, because she often talked to me about how to handle Sara's emotional state. She had good advice. I usually would reiterate what she said to me and it almost always helped Sara to feel better. I knew she was worried about her, because she often had a sad look on her face when she looked at her. It was obvious she knew more about what Sara had been through than I did, so I was always eager for her input.

"Let's go to my house after school today," I suggested. I knew they enjoyed coming over. My house was nonstop entertainment for them.

"I'll have to stop by and ask my dad. He's off today and expected me home by three thirty," Sara said as she took a tissue from her purse and tried to wipe her face. Her dad was very strict with her, which confused Erick and me. Sara was a straight A student and the least defiant kid we knew. We had decided it had to do with them losing Sara's mom three years ago in a car accident. Her dad seemed at a loss at times on what Sara should and shouldn't be allowed to do for a girl her age. Erick and I did our best to try and build trust with him. His family had known Sara's family for almost their entire lives, so it helped if Erick was going to be with her when she wanted to do something with her friends. Well, friends as in me and Erick. For some reason, the girls that used to be friends with her appeared ill at ease around her, which led me and Erick trying to find out why. Eva advised us one day not talk to them about Sara, because it may hurt Sara if she found out we were talking about her when she was not around, even if our intentions were good.

When I first met Sara's dad, I used every manner I had ever learned, and as a result, he quickly came to trust me as well. Neither my family nor I could determine why he didn't appear to trust Sara. He had made a remark to my dad one time that Sara had to be watched because she used little common sense and could become wild if not supervised. My dad had already met Sara by that time, and he had commented to me that Sara's dad's common sense seemed a little uncommon. We just didn't know what we were talking about at that time.

"That sounds good to me," Erick was calming down.

Whew! I thought, that was a close one. I watched as a group of boys from the football team came over and expressed their support of Erick about Cody and the picture. Of course, they didn't fail to say he could have broken Cody like a twig or smashed him like a bug. It appeared as if boys too smart to get into a fight at school still needed to boast about their superior physical abilities. Some of his other friends, which were not really friends anymore, had sided with Shelby and Jacob. They didn't want to become targets because they stood up to Shelby and Jacob. At times, they went as far as laughing and passing around the picture so they could join in on the fun of making others miserable. They wanted to be accepted by those people who made them anxious.

The rest of the day went by without any further drama until right after sixth hour. I was getting my nightmare science book out of my locker. I removed it just in time to avoid Shelby slamming the locker on my hand.

"So, tell me Rainbow girl, what box do you check on a paper that requires you to identify your race? Is it black, Hispanic, Caucasian, Asian or all of the above? I mean what exactly are you?" Shelby asked with a smirk. A group of Shelby's friends laughed behind her.

"I really don't worry too much about it, Shelby, but tell me, what exactly do you do? I mean it must be kind of hard, because they don't usually ask you to identify your species? I guess you could always write in 'mentally challenged primate' under your race." I shot back at her. One of the girls behind her laughed and she turned to glare at her before returning her look of hatred back towards me.

"Shut up, easy, breezy, color girl!"

"Shut up? Is that your best comeback? You do realize we're not in middle school anymore? If you're going to be a bully, try to be a little more sophisticated about it."

Shelby pushed me into the locker with enough force that my head flew back and hit the locker. I don't know if it was the adrenaline but it didn't hurt at all. I just smiled at her. She was much taller and bigger than I was, but I didn't feel any real strength behind her push. This girl had no idea the kind of animals I had tried to restrain over the years.

"Girls! Stop this right now!" One of my favorite teachers worked her way into the crowd and firmly grabbed both of our arms. I thought this was a little much since I had made no move to fight back.

"I haven't touched her," I said in my defense.

"Well, it looked like both of you were getting physical! I know you're new to this school, but we don't tolerate any type of violence!" I looked at her in disbelief.

"She pushed me!" Shelby lied with the ease of a pathological liar.

"You two just need to break it up before you both get in trouble. Get to your seventh hour or I'll have to report both of you to the office." Clearly, she wasn't interested in finding out what all the commotion was about.

Shelby glared at me one more time before turning to stomp down the hall. I quickly went the other way to my seventh hour class. I had felt pretty strong during that encounter, but as I sat down at my desk in science, I felt a little shaky. I was hurt. I expected that kind of treatment from someone like Shelby, but the fact the teacher had witnessed the entire interaction and reacted the way she did, really hurt. She was an adult. Adults were supposed to protect students from treatment like that, but she had acted as though I was as much to blame as Shelby. I shouldn't have said anything to her. Was it the species or sophistication remark? I wondered. Did that justify Shelby shoving me into the lockers?

I looked up in surprise when the bell rang. Evidently, I had sat through the entire hour just rehashing the incident. I hadn't heard one word the teacher had said. The entire board was covered in writing and I hadn't taken one note. I felt a little panicky as I looked around at the students getting up and leaving the classroom. I didn't know anyone in there who I could ask to share their notes. I got up prepared to approach the teacher when I noticed Eva standing in the hallway. I immediately changed my route. I fought the urge to run to her and throw myself in her arms. When I reached Eva, she very lightly placed her hand on the side of my face. I was surprised at how comforting it felt.

"Adults make poor decisions too. You are strong, so use this pain to increase your wisdom. Rely on this strength and wisdom to guide your actions and words. I am proud of you," Eva said very softly.

I felt a knot in my throat. There was no way I could express to her how much her words meant to me. I smiled at her through teary eyes, hoping she could see how much she was helping me. I realized we were getting odd looks from other students in the hall, but I didn't care. I felt a sudden surge of my inner strength return. Eva returned my smile before she turned to walk down the hall. I watched her until she turned a corner and I could no longer see her.

"Hey, beautiful!" I recognized Jacob's voice from behind me. The boy was under a serious delusion that all girls were in love with him.

"Leave me alone, Jacob. I have nothing I wish to talk to you about...ever."

"Well, maybe I can change your mind. Shelby can be a bitch, but she really is helpful in setting up dates with girls that are interested in me. In some ways, she's is nicer than you realize. We have been friends for a very long time."

I looked at him as though he had suggested I become friends with a psychotic serial killer.

My look wasn't lost on him. He laughed before saying, "Ask your friend Sara. She'll tell you what a good time we had on our first and only date. Unfortunately, I just didn't find her interesting enough to go out with again. Sara's a little strange, but Shelby did try to make friends with her."

"Really, Jacob?" I asked with total disbelief. I felt a sense of unease thinking about Jacob and Sara together. There was no world in which Jacob would be good for Sara.

I was surprised when Jacob turned quickly into another hallway. I then saw Erick making his way down the hall. I could tell by his face that he had heard about the Shelby incident. The anger was evident on his face.

Before he could say anything, I held up my hand with a smile and reassured him. "I'm fine. I think I gave as good as I got."

"It's just ridiculous! We have tried every constructive method professionals say will help with bullying, but nothing works. It would probably really help if we could get support from the teachers. I don't care about being a snitch. People who don't ask for help are just foolish. No adult would put up with this kind of harassment in a work place. If they can't teach us how to handle a problem like this now, how are we supposed to handle the adult world?" Erick ran his hand through his dark hair in frustration. I knew he didn't expect an answer.

"Erick, were you here last year when Shelby befriended Sara and set her up on a date with Jacob?"

Erick briefly closed his eyes with a frustrated sigh. "I just don't see Shelby trying to be friends with Sara. I must have already been out of school when that happened."

"I can't imagine Shelby trying to help Sara either. She's jealous of her."

"Do you think Shelby had something to do with what's going on with Sara?"

"I get this sick feeling it is Shelby and Jacob." I quickly scanned the hall around us to make sure Sara wasn't within hearing distance. "I just don't know how to approach it with her. Eva said I should wait and she would tell me when she was ready."

"Let's wait then, because I know there were some rumors going around about Sara having a breakdown or something. I don't want to do anything if it's going to further hurt her."

"People were saying she had a breakdown?" I asked, fearing it may be true.

Erick shrugged his shoulders. He reached down and grabbed my hand firmly in his as we began walking towards my locker. I felt the now familiar tingle when he touched me. It made me want to squeeze his hand even tighter.

"I can tell you the Sara we know this year is nothing like the Sara I grew up around. She made everyone around her laugh. She had a good sense of humor and a way of making everyone around her feel good. She was like you then. She was special."

"You think I'm special?"

"You have something about you that you don't see in very many people. I can tell people around you think the same thing. I think you're very special," he said as he put his arm around me and hugged me to his side.

I realized Erick had come to a complete stop. His eyes narrowed as he looked at something ahead. I felt a drop in my stomach when I realized Shelby and a large group of students were standing by my locker. I didn't want to go any further but Erick began walking again. He had a determined look on his face as he began pulling me by my hand again.

"Don't you two look cute!" Shelby said sarcastically. A few students snickered behind their hands. "If you are looking for your little blond crazy friend, she just went running out of here like a raving lunatic."

I didn't even think. I heard Erick make some kind of veiled threat to Shelby as I just took off running through the building. Something within me was telling me to find Sara as quickly as I could.
Chapter Seven

I heard Erick yelling my name behind me. As I stopped to wait for him, I stood on my tip toes to scan the area around me for Sara's blond head. I saw blond heads but none of them belonged to Sara. I felt like crying. I had never been an emotional person, but right now I just wanted to sit down and cry and not about any one thing. I just could feel the tears building inside me.

"Do you see her?" Erick's hand rested on my shoulder.

"No." My voice cracked despite my attempts to stay calm. I felt a tear run down my cheek. I immediately wiped my eyes and took a deep breath.

Erick pulled me in and hugged me to his chest. I didn't want to move. I knew I had to, but it felt so safe and peaceful. I closed my eyes as I felt him lightly kiss me on the top of my head.

"We'll find her. She's probably going the way we walk every day. People tend to stay with what's familiar even when they're upset."

I stepped back when I heard him call the name Jeff. A boy that was shorter than Erick stopped and looked at him. He had light brown hair with deep brown eyes. He had a frown on his face but smiled as we made our way over to him. I recognized him from my seventh hour science class. He was usually quiet in class, but he was friendly to those people who talked to him.

"Hey, Erick, what's up?" he asked as he looked between Erick and me. He smiled at me and nodded his head to acknowledge my presence.

"Have you seen Sara Townsend?"

Jeff cocked his head to the side with a frown as he said, "She ran straight out into the street!" He pointed to the area of the street she crossed. "I yelled but she just kept going. Is she okay?"

"I don't know. Did you see what direction she went?"

"Yeah, she cut through the buildings in that direction."

"Thanks bud," Erick said as he turned to follow the direction Jeff had indicated.

Erick grabbed my hand, crossed the street and cut through the buildings. Erick was right. She seemed to be going home in the route we always used. We began running. I knew Erick was holding back to accommodate for my shorter legs, but it felt like we were flying. In that moment, I had never felt anything better than to just be running. I knew people were probably looking at us, believing we were running from something instead of to something. I wanted to find Sara but I didn't want this sense of freedom to end. It was like I was escaping from everything that had happened in that school, and I wondered if Sara hadn't felt the same way.

Erick slowed down and I realized he was looking around to make sure Sara hadn't stopped somewhere in between the school and her house. The worry crept back in as I realized Sara must have run as fast as she could. We should have caught up with her, but she wasn't anywhere to be seen. I began to feel a stitch in my side.

"Erick, I have to slow down." Erick came to a complete stop when he saw me holding my side.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking to make you run like that. I've run for track every year but I didn't stop to think...about your legs."

I scowled at him. "What about my legs?"

"Well, they're a little short, stunted really."

"That is so not right! My legs are not stunted!" I crossed my arms in a good imitation of someone highly offended and began walking. "I prefer vertically challenged."

"Ah! You are exactly right. I had forgotten. A very good friend of mine told me the same thing not even a week ago," Erick said as he held up a finger and draped his other arm around my shoulders. We began walking again.

"What good friend?" I asked, wondering if he was maybe a little serious despite his teasing mood.

"Billy. We were having a long discussion about how vertically challenged could actually be a highly valued strength."

"I don't remember any Billy. Does he go to our school?"

"No, they wouldn't admit him. We live in what some would consider a closed-minded community."

"Why wouldn't they admit him?"

"They were afraid some of his compulsive traits would cause problems for some of the other students and teachers. He doesn't have very good boundaries. He has an overwhelming urge to sit very close to others. He doesn't allow anyone to have any personal space. He gradually moves closer and closer until he's actually sitting on you."

"I don't understand. Does he have like a personality disorder?"

Erick sighed. His face revealed a feigned trace of sympathy for his friend as he shook his head yes.

"So, then he doesn't understand his disorder is a problem?"

"No, like I said, he thinks it's actually a strength...and although his legs are not nearly as pretty as yours, he highly values them."

"Awe, I bet I would like him." I liked the idea of someone accepting himself and turning his affliction into a strength.

"Oh, you most definitely would. Your dad really likes him. He lives with my grandmother and she took him to see your dad a couple of days," he said with a grin.

"Erick Mchail! You are talking about your grandmother's miniature dachshund!" I began looking around on the ground for something to hit him with. I couldn't find anything so I used the only thing I had. We both were laughing as I chased him around in circles, swinging my bag at him. His longer legs always kept him out of my reach, so I knew I was in no danger of really striking him with the nightmare science book. He suddenly stopped and stooped to quickly lift me up in his arms. He gave me a little toss and then began swinging me in circles. I kicked my legs to try and dislodge his hold on me. I knew it would probably cause him to drop me, but I was laughing too hard to care.

We both froze when a car pulled close to the curb. It was Sara's dad. "Have you two seen Sara? She came home and was really upset, but she ran out of the house again before I could stop her. She's getting out of control!"

Erick lowered me to the ground as we looked at each other. Sara? Out of Control? I ran over to the open window of the car.

"Mr. Townsend, we'll find her. There were some kids that were really mean to her at school. She's just really hurt. I promise we'll find her and bring her home." I looked to Erick for support.

"Yeah, we'll get her home. It's not her fault. She's just had a bad day."

Mr. Townsend didn't look entirely convinced, but I knew his anger was being caused by his worry for his daughter. My dad had said he thought Sara's dad was really at a loss of how to handle Sara's emotional difficulties. He said the more you loved someone the more difficult it was to think objectively. It started with concern, and next came a lot of worrying and anxiety, then there was the worst kind of fear imaginable, and finally anger, because you felt so helpless about not being able to help. The only thing he knew to do was to be very strict and keep her as close to home as possible, so he could watch over and protect her.

I had told him I didn't understand what he meant by "the worst kind of fear imaginable," but he said I probably wouldn't until I had children of my own. Although, I didn't understand it all, I no longer saw Mr. Townsend as a mean man who didn't seem to love his daughter. Now, as I talked with him, I saw almost a look of relief cross his face as he thanked us for any assistance we may be able to offer him. Erick and I watched as he drove off in the school's direction. I kind of hoped he was going there to yell at teachers who didn't seem to care some students were really getting bullied.

"Let's check her house again to just be on the safe side," Erick suggested as we watched Mr. Townsend drive off.

I felt guilty for playing around while Sara was off probably all by herself and hurting. I nodded my head to express my agreement to his plan. We were all business again as we took off at a brisk walk towards her house. The sky was blue and cloudless, but it suddenly felt like a dark and dreary day.

Sara wasn't at home and she wasn't at the small ice cream place, or the park, or the small mall we sometimes hung around. We were beginning to get panicky after going to all those places and rechecking her house again. Mr. Townsend hadn't returned to their house, so we assumed he hadn't found her either. Erick nervously called his cell phone, hoping he wouldn't find out they were at the hospital. I heard his sigh of relief and after he hung up, he told me Sara's dad was checking his sister's and his mom's house. He evidently wanted to double check every place he had called. Something was very wrong.

I sunk down to sit on the curb to get a little relief for my tiring legs. Sara's face and the look of raw pain kept flashing through my mind. It caused an ache in my stomach as I fought back tears again.

Erick and I tried to think of places we would choose to go if we were upset. I was a little embarrassed when I admitted I would seek out my mom and dad. Erick said he would want solitude. He lived in an old two-story house as well. He crawled out on the roof outside his window. He could see everything fairly well, but because of trees others couldn't see him as easily.

I jumped to my feet when he told me about his roof. I couldn't believe I hadn't thought of it before.

"I know where she is! Come on!" I said as I took off running through Sara's backyard, cutting through the neighborhood to my house.

"Wait!" Erick called from behind me, but I could see he was still following me when I didn't stop. "Didn't you call your mom?"

"She's not in the house." I threw the white wooden gate to the backyard open. I heard Erick make an "ah" noise and knew he had figured it out.

I didn't even try to call out. I ran to the enormous tree and began climbing the ladder to the treehouse. Erick followed right on my heels.

"Thank god, Sara!" I said as I crawled to her side. She sat with her legs pulled up to her chest and her face buried in her knees. She raised her head to look at us and her eyes were red and swollen from crying.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," she blurted out.

"Sara, you have nothing to be sorry for. We've just been worried...and your dad...he's looking for you." Erick's eyes darted to mine. I knew he didn't want to say the wrong thing.

"He doesn't understand. I can't let him see me cry again. He'll want me to go to the hospital again." Sara raised her head from her knees and began furiously wiping her face with her sleeves.

I reached out to put my hands on her shoulders, hoping she wasn't planning to get up. I was a little worried right now if he did see her, he may do just that. She looked pathetic.

"Wait! Sara, let me talk to my dad. He can call your dad and tell him you're okay and ask if you can stay. He's likes my dad." I said urgently, hoping it was true. She agreed with a small shake of her head and sank back down to bury her face in her knees again. I looked with unease at Erick. Am I doing the right thing? It may be safer for her to go to the hospital.

Erick looked lost as well but he shook his head. "That's a good idea, Lilly. Why don't you go tell your dad and I'll wait here with Sara?"

I cast one more look of doubt at Sara as I moved to climb down out of the treehouse. I was already going through my head what I could say to my parents, but fortunately, it turned out my dad was comfortable with the idea as long as we didn't let her go anywhere. I hugged him, promising him and ran back out to the treehouse. I hoped Sara's dad would trust us to try our best to take care of Sara. Although, I felt better knowing my dad understood Sara was in bad shape. He would be ready if our best proved to not be enough, and I knew I had to be ready to ask for help if we couldn't handle it. This was not a time for Erick and me to take a risk and be reluctant to ask for help.

As I placed my hand on the treehouse ladder, preparing to ascend, I felt a very odd sensation. I stopped and looked around and out of nowhere came a strong warm breeze. The wind had not blown all day and after one large rush of air, it completely stopped. I gasped as I turned back to the treehouse ladder, because I clearly heard a voice whisper, "it's time." A chill went up my spine. The whisper sound like someone was suddenly standing directly beside me. I quickly turned in each direction, but found nothing. I looked up at the treehouse and began to climb. I somehow knew exactly what it meant, so I reached for the inner strength I had needed earlier.

"Sara, I promise there is nothing you could tell Lilly and me that would change the way we feel about you. Please talk to us." Erick's voice was soothing as he asked for her trust. Did he hear it too? I crawled back over and set on the other side of Sara. I put my arm around her and brushed the hair back from her face.

"You can stay right here with us, Sara. My dad said he would talk to your dad and reassure him," I said as I placed my hand over hers and lightly squeezed to hold tight to her hand.

"Ah! I have an idea." I held up my finger. "This treehouse is our own world. It will always be here to shelter us and when we're here, we can tell each other anything and know it will stay here in the treehouse."

"That's sounds good, Lilly," Erick said. "In the treehouse, we always speak the truth and no matter what we do, the truth will never be judged. I think we all need a place in the world where we feel safe."

"You won't want to be friends with me anymore. I know you won't, but I...want to tell you. My counselor said I should talk about it, but my dad said he was afraid of what others would say to me. He was afraid no one would respect me anymore. I did a stupid thing."

"We all make mistakes, Sara, but true friends never think differently of you because you do," I said with a smile. "I would imagine it's other people's judgmental attitudes that has him worried."

"We are in our treehouse, Sara, it's safe to tell the truth. Tell me, Sara. Why have you been so different this year? Where did that light behind your eyes go? I miss it and I want Lilly to see it." Erick was watching her expressions closely as he talked.

Sara raised her head to look at me, and I nodded my head with a smile of encouragement. I had heard Erick say that so many times when she wasn't around. I wanted to know what happened to this girl who was so very sad and fragile. What had turned a bright soul into a shell of a gray shadow?

"I think it was when I visited you in the hospital," she began with a whisper. "I wanted to ask what happened, and it made her angry. I don't know why because she knows we're just friends. She just didn't want me there," Sara began as she rested her chin on her knee. "Do you remember me visiting you after you got hurt in the football game?"

"Yes, I do. It's not real clear because they had given me all these drugs, but I remember you and Shelby being there. I didn't see you after that. It was like you disappeared."

"It was because I was stupid, and I believed her when she said she wanted to be my friend. She was really nice to me at school, but she told me the hospital said you couldn't have any more visitors. I think everyone thought we had become friends. Her friends even acted like they liked me and they started treating me like...I don't know...one of them. One Tuesday, she said I could come over to spend Friday night, and we would have some friends and Jacob over so I could talk to him. We planned it all week. I was so excited. My dad even bought me a really pretty pink and white plaid top with white lace and pink stitching on the collar. He also got me the pair of cowboy boots I had been wanting for a long time."

She paused with a smile. It was like she was visualizing the boots.

"I loved those boots. I think they meant so much to me because it was the first really special thing he had bought for me since my mom had died. It took him a long time to understand how things like those boots were special to me. I felt so good when I had my new shirt and boots on, and they meant so much more because my dad had bought them for me and it made him happy to do it."

I tried to remember if I had seen the boots or the shirt she was talking about, but I was pretty sure I had never seen either one. Sara and I liked to talk about clothes. We often looked at magazines or went to the mall and every once in a while, we bought something new, which we occasionally shared.

"I asked her to invite you." I heard her say to Erick. "I knew I would be more comfortable if you were there. I knew you much better than any of them." She rubbed the heel of her hands into her eyes and shook her head as though to clear her head.

"I don't remember that, Sara," Erick said quietly.

"I think it's because she never invited you. At one time, I thought maybe you didn't want to see me make a fool of myself over Jacob or maybe I was just a fool for believing Shelby."

"Never, Sara, Never," Erick whispered. "I didn't even know all of you were having a party. I would have been there."

"Really?" Sara searched his eyes and seemed relieved when he made a motion of holding his hand over his heart as though swearing an oath.

"Were you embarrassed because I had a crush on Jacob?"

"Absolutely not! Jacob can be an ass sometimes and I didn't think he was worth your time, but I think it's normal for girls and guys to get crushes on each other. It's just kind of what we do."

"Jacob doesn't think like that. The night of the party he told me how I had embarrassed him, and Shelby told me that's why she had invited me over so that I would get the hint and leave him and you alone. All her friends were there and they were laughing at me. I just wanted to leave. I wanted to leave so bad. I realized she had played me. I tried to leave. I knew I would feel better if I could just get out of there, but...that's not what happened."
Chapter Eight

Sara had stopped talking and was just staring out of the treehouse. She obviously was thinking about the party, but she seemed lost, like she was unsure of what or how to tell us about the party. A tear slowly ran down her cheek, but she had no recognizable feeling on her face. It was like she was frozen in the vision of her memory.

"Just start at the beginning of the party, Sara, and tell us what happened that night," I asked quietly. I somehow knew this party was the root of all of Sara's problems.

"Well...I got there at seven and everyone was already there. It seemed like they had been there for a while, and I was confused because we had planned I would go to Shelby's house early. She promised to do my hair and makeup, but everyone was already there and most of them were drinking. I didn't even know that Shelby or Jacob drank alcohol."

I heard Erick mumble, "That doesn't really surprise me."

"Shelby drug me into the middle of the room where I was surrounded on all sides by everyone. They began calling me a lame freshman and a lot of other things; little slut, wannabe, and Jacob called me an insane stalker. I really didn't understand that one because I had never followed Jacob or even tried to talk to him. I only said 'Hi' to him a couple of times. I knew I had watched him some, but I tried not to be obvious about it. I just thought he was really cute. I didn't mean to make him feel uncomfortable."

She shrugged her shoulders and gave us a weak smile. It was apparent she thought her behavior had been embarrassing. I felt so bad for her. I wanted to point out all the things I had done around Erick, but was scared to reveal how I felt for him while he was sitting here. I made a mental note to talk to her about it later. I knew she was aware of my feelings for him.

"Sara, you never did anything wrong. What they did was wrong!" You could hear the anger in Erick's voice. "No wonder you wanted to leave!"

"Yes," she agreed quietly and then fell silent again. I was about to reassure her as well when she began talking again.

"I yelled at them to stop, but Shelby and her tall blonde-haired friend, Sierra, began pushing me back and forth. Shelby ripped my shirt and everyone began cheering, so they ripped my new shirt off and everyone just kept getting louder so they ripped off my bra...and everything else. The others just continued cheering so they ripped everything."

Somewhere in the back of my mind I realized Erick and I were just staring at her in shock. What she had just told me stopped every thought in my head. All I could do was visualize little Sara, naked and vulnerable in the middle of a bunch of crazy, cruel people. I closed my eyes in dread when she began talking again.

"Jacob was laughing and laughing. Sometimes when I'm trying to sleep, all I can hear is his laughing ringing in my head. He pushed me into a bedroom and slammed the door behind us. I could hear everyone cheering him on to 'get some' and I was so scared. He told me since I liked him so much, I was going to prove it. I told him no. I just kept saying 'No! No!' but it didn't matter. He began slapping me but I kept fighting so he hit me really hard in the head and body with his fist. He said that if I ever wanted to leave this room, I would do it. He said everyone already knew anyway. I just remember crying and asking him 'please, let me go, please' but he didn't. He slammed me against the wall and I hit my head and everything got blurry and it was like my body wouldn't move. I wanted to fight but I couldn't. He held me down on the bed and...he hurt me. Even with all that, I can remember thinking no one had ever told me how bad it hurt."

I felt like I couldn't breathe as she continued to talk. I knew there were tears running down my face, but I had no control over it. I looked at Erick and all the color had drained from his face. I reached out and grabbed Sara's hand in both of mine, but I don't think she was even aware of it. She just continued talking with no trace of emotion in her voice.

"When he finished, he got off of me and threw the door open. I heard him yell to give the little slut her clothes so they could make me leave. I realized that most of the people were very quiet then. Sierra brought my clothes in and dropped them on the bed. I put my new shirt on but it was badly ripped. I covered myself as well as I could. I was finally able to get my jeans on and when I did, I just ran. It was cold out and I realized I didn't have my boots but I just kept running. My head was pounding and my whole body hurt, but I just kept moving. By the time I reached our neighborhood, I was barely able to walk. My dad was gone so I was able to slip into the garage window and get into the house. I went to my bedroom and closed the door. I didn't turn any lights on, because I didn't want my dad knowing I was home when he got back. I hid in the closet and slept there. My dad found me there the next morning. I was covered in bruises so he took me to the emergency room. He told them I had been in an accident. I had told him what Jacob had done, but he said if I told them, they wouldn't leave me alone. He was so scared of them hurting me more with their questions."

Sara lowered her head onto her knees again. I wanted to throw up. I knew I needed to control my response, but I couldn't stop shaking.

"So, now you know what I mean when I say I'm so stupid. My dad said I should have never gone to that party, and I shouldn't be having sex with boys yet. I thought he knew I was unwilling. I've never seen an adult upset like that...crying...and it was my fault. I just wanted to die. I took a bottle full of pills the doctor had given me for sleep, but my dad caught me and they made me go to a crazy hospital. I just wish I had been smart enough to realize that Shelby was just setting me up so they could all tell me they didn't like me. Some of my friends found out some of it, not the worse, but they still didn't know what to do or say to me, so they little by little stopped talking to me. I don't blame them. There isn't one of them that would have ended up in a situation like that."

Sara raised her head and looked at me. She seemed to realize I was clutching her hand because she lightly squeezed my hand. She had that haunted look on her face, but still seemed to not be fully aware of everything around her.

"I know this is going to make things uncomfortable, so I really mean what I said that first day of school. I understand if you can't be my friend anymore," she whispered as she wiped the tears from my face. Her voice rose as she turned to Erick. "I'm sorry if this embarrasses you with your friends. I think they believe you already know so I doubt they'll bring it up if they haven't already done so. I just panicked today. They all closed in around me in the hall and were taunting me, and I just kind of lost it. I didn't even stop to think about it, I just ran."

"Oh my god, Sara! You are not at fault for anything! They assaulted you and Jacob assaulted and raped you." I could hear the shock in his voice and knew his thoughts were not much different than my own.

"No! Please, don't say that word. I hate that word!" Sara clapped her hands over her ears and she was becoming visibly upset again.

I just reacted. I reached out and grabbed her and held her close.

"Sara, listen to me. You are the strongest, bravest person I have ever met. I'm proud to be called your friend, but you have got to stop blaming this on yourself. You didn't do one thing wrong, Sara, not one thing. There is nothing, absolutely nothing anyone could ever do that would justify their behavior. You are a beautiful, intelligent, and kind person. I don't think I would have had the courage to get near any of them again, but every day you go to school and face it. That's strength, Sara! That's the kind of strength that's so important and so rare to find. I promise you that I will be your friend until you get so sick of me you'll tell me to go away."

"She's right, Sara. You're not the one that did something wrong, they did. They had no right to put their hands on you! I'm going to kill Jacob and I'm going to make sure everyone at school knows what kind of person Shelby is!" Erick's voice was filled with rage.

"No, Erick, please don't tell people what happened! I don't think I could bear having everyone know what I did," Sara pleaded as she grabbed Erick's arm and burst into tears again.

"No, that's not what he means, Sara. He's not going to betray your confidence. Neither of us will, but at some time when you're ready, they should be held accountable for their actions. You didn't do anything wrong, but they committed a very severe crime. This bullying really got out of control and they crossed a very serious line. It's even worse they made you feel like you should in some way feel responsible for what happened." I was talking quickly, but I felt like I was holding on by a thread. I knew I needed to be very careful about how I handled this. I pled with Erick with

my eyes. He had to get his anger under control for Sara's sake. I watched as he clenched and unclenched his hands repeatedly. He was taking deep breaths. He finally was able to meet my eyes and give his head a slight nod. He wiped his hands down his face.

"Sara, the last thing I ever want to do is to cause you further harm. I promise I won't do anything that will further hurt you, and I won't do anything you don't want me to do." He lifted his hand and it hovered cautiously over her shoulder as though he was afraid to touch something that may shatter from its weight. He slowly lowered it and let it rest there when there was no sign of distress from her.

Sara looked between the two of us. "Really?"

The light was in her eyes as it had been on the first day of school when I told her we would be friends. It now caused me to have a knot in my throat. It was evident she was surprised by our responses. I felt almost a wave of nausea pass through my stomach again, but I smiled as I shook my head.

Sara reached and hugged me and then Erick. She appeared to have a dramatic change in her mood. It was if she had just admitted to some horrific behavior and was really relieved we hadn't judged her and still wanted to be her friends.

"I better get home. My dad will be mad," she said as she used the sleeves of her shirt to wipe away any remaining tears from her face. "Are we still going to talk tomorrow and meet after school?"

"Absolutely! You can talk to me about anything, Sara. I promise to always listen," I said as I watched her crawl to the ladder. "And... and can I talk to you too?"

"Of course! I promise you can always talk to me." Her whole face was lit up now. "See you guys tomorrow!"

Erick and I both attempted a cheerful farewell. I looked silently at Erick for a few moments. I realized I was holding my breath until I was sure she was gone. I raised up on my knees and watched as she crossed the yard to get to her street. When I couldn't see her anymore, I sank back down to sit on the floor of the treehouse, covered my face with my hands and burst into tears. He pulled me close to him and just held me as the sobs shook my entire body.

I wanted to stop crying, but it was like I had lost the control I had held so tightly to when Sara told us what had happened to her. I just kept seeing her small petite form beside Jacob's much taller and larger one. It was if something had broken inside me. I wanted to run, escape, and hide, but I kept hearing her voice in my head telling us what had happened. "I was so stupid", she had said, "I got played". Did she honestly believe she was at fault for trusting a girl several years older than herself? What they had done was monstrous! How could so many people be that deranged? I felt anger building in me and it felt good. It gave me the type of strength someone needed to fight, but I didn't have that right. No one but Sara had that right and she didn't have the strength, so I would use my strength to always be there for her.

I slowly became aware that Erick had both of his arms wrapped tightly around me, but he was somehow stroking the back of my head in a comforting motion. I looked up and began laughing. My dad's spider monkey was sitting on Erick's head, running its hand down the back of my head as it responded to my emotions.

Erick looked at me in surprise and I realized he was so caught up in his own thoughts that he didn't even realize a small monkey was sitting on his head. Now I was fighting the urge to collapse into hysteria. I caught myself laughing and crying in an almost delirious state.

"Boozer!" I said as I pointed to him. "Get off of his head!"

Erick jumped as he became aware there was a small animal on his head. He began to reach his hand up but the monkey reached down and squeezed his nose and made a short squealing noise. It quickly hopped out of Erick's reach and sat on the floor, screeching at us before disappearing over the edge of the treehouse.

Erick's mouth was hanging open as he stared at the edge of the treehouse where the monkey had disappeared. I could tell he was trying to put some order to what had just happened. I fell over on my side as the laughter robbed me of oxygen.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, that's my dad's monkey. He was rubbing the back of my head and I thought it was you, but then I noticed I could see both of your hands," I said as I tried to gain control of my laughter. "He's awful. He drinks my dad's alcohol and steals anything and everything and hides it under a floorboard in the dining room."

"Were you patting my back?" he asked as it began to sink in what had just happened.

I shook my head no with a smile and he laughed as he looked toward the monkey's exit spot again.

"So, he was patting my back, your head and sitting on my head?"

We were smiling at each other as I shook my head yes. We dissolved into laughter again. Suddenly, it was like we truly lost all control of our mind and body, shaking, laughing and crying, but it definitely wasn't all fun. We ended up laying silently side by side, looking through the roof of the treehouse. I suddenly felt absolutely exhausted.

"Erick, what are we going to do?" I whispered.
Chapter Nine

"I don't know. I just feel so angry, but I know that's not going to help Sara," he said quietly.

"When she was talking, I felt like I was trapped in a nightmare, but it was real. It really happened to her and I feel at such a loss of what to do."

"I don't know what's right or wrong to say," he said as he sat back up, laced his hands and draped his arms over his bent knee.

I propped myself up on my elbows. "I know. I just wanted to be able to say something – anything that would really help her to feel better, and yet, I don't think there is anything I could do or say that would make it all better."

"I don't think anyone could do anything that would erase the damage that's been done. I knew she wasn't the Sara I knew, but my god, how could she be?"

"We promised we wouldn't say anything, but is it the right thing to do? This is pretty serious, and what if she tries to hurt herself again?"

"I think it's why her dad watches her so closely. I mean he's an adult and has had her hospitalized. Surely, her dad would do whatever he could to keep her from further harm."

"Erick, he doesn't even want her to talk about it! I don't understand that. Does he think what happened is some kind of reflection on his parenting, or does he think she is partially at fault? He's got to realize she can't get better if she doesn't get further treatment. I don't feel in any way qualified to do that." I could now hear the anger in my voice.

"Do you think it will be too hard for you to stay friends with her? She's very vulnerable right now, and it's going to be really stressful – like walking on egg shells all the time."

"There's absolutely no way I would ever abandon her! I can't stand the thought of how it would hurt her," I said, surprised he would even think in that manner.

"I was so hoping you would say that, but then I kind of knew you would," he said. "You're a good person, Lilly. In fact, I think you're almost perfect."

"I'm most definitely not perfect," I said with a smile. I hoped I was hiding how his words affected me. My heart began beating a little faster. I wanted to say I thought he was perfect too.

"I have a confession to make." He had a crooked grin on his face.

"What is it?" I realized I was holding my breath.

"Well, you know how we met that first day? When you sat by me in first hour?"

"Yeah." I felt the butterflies in my stomach again.

"I set that up. I got there early and saved that seat, so you would have almost no choice but to sit beside me. I wanted to meet you. I had been wanting to meet you almost all summer. I think you're the most beautiful and interesting girl I've ever met."

"Are you teasing me?" I asked. I was going to have to breathe soon.

"No, I would never tease that way." He reached out and took my hand, cradling it between his two larger hands.

"That was the first day I saw you. How did you know about me?" I asked as I remembered being in awe of his looks. I knew I had never seen him before.

"Well, that leads to another confession. You know how I like to sit on my roof outside my house?"

I lifted my eyebrows in question.

He laughed. "No, I haven't been spying on you...much. Well, not in the way it sounds. I just happened to be sitting on my roof one day, and I could see you in your back yard. You were chasing a little burro around trying to put a small halter on it. I saw you chase it one way with the halter in your hand, and then a few minutes later, I saw you running back the other way, but the little burro had the halter in his mouth and was chasing you. That little bitty horse chased you for about ten minutes all over the yard."

I crossed my arms and pretended to be indignant. "I'll have you know that is Man O' War! People need to be highly cautious around such a dangerous animal. He can do a lot of damage with those huge hooves!"

Erick threw back his head and laughed. I tried to keep a straight face, but couldn't do it for very long, so I laughed with him. I could only imagine how that must have looked. I thought about some of the things that happened around our house and covered my face in embarrassment.

"Have you seen anything else?" I asked in dread. His face immediately lit up with enthusiasm.

"Well, there was this one time when you took a gigantic dog for a walk, and he end up dragging you behind him!" He ended in a hoot of laughter. "And another time you looked like you were wrestling with a raccoon. Oh! And I've seen Boozer before. He had some kind of envelope and I could hear what sounded like you yelling threats. He really ticked you off when he opened it and took a piece of paper out and threw the envelope at you." He was howling in laughter now and his laugh was contagious.

"I remember that!" I said with a laugh. "It was a real letter from my friend in New Mexico. She literally wrote a letter and mailed it! Who does that anymore?"

"It looked like Boozer got to read it first."

"He did! I swear that monkey can read! I think he can understand every word you say and he knows how you feel..."

I stopped abruptly as Sara's haunted face flashed in my mind. What am I doing? How can I possibly be laughing after what she told me today? I felt as though I was betraying her by having a good time again with Erick. I looked at Erick and I could tell he knew what I was thinking. We sat in silence as though we had never been laughing.

"Lilly," he began, "maybe we should talk to Eva about Sara. She will know what we need to do to help her. I want to help her, but I also really want to hurt Jacob and Shelby and every single person there that night."

"I just don't understand how so many people could just sit back, and watch something horrible like that happen, and do nothing to stop it," I said, feeling angry again. "They're as guilty as Jacob and Shelby!"

"I want to know who was there that night."

"Maybe they were drunk and didn't realize what was going on."

He frowned as he shook his head.

"I know, it's just really scary to think a group of people we go to school with sat and watched as something like that happened."

"It's unforgiveable. They were caught up in a frenzy, but not one person attempted to help her."

"What are we going to do, Erick?" I was right back to my original question.

"Talk to Eva. For some reason, she seems to be more comfortable talking to you about Sara than me. It may be because you can relate to Sara better. She will guide us."

"Okay, I'll talk to her tomorrow." I was dreading it a little, but if it helped Sara, I would talk to anyone.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," I said. My mind was on how to approach Eva about Sara. She probably already knew because she seemed to be watching over her so closely.

"Why did you ask Sara if you could talk to her about things?"

"Well, I want her to know our friendship is a two-way street. I didn't want her to think she was the only one with problems."

"Lilly...this didn't happen to..."

"Oh no, nothing that even compares to this, but I want her to feel needed too. Everyone needs that."

"I want to be needed too," he pleaded.

"You are very much needed, Erick Mchail! I would never abandon Sara, but this is so much easier since we both know." I paused for a few seconds. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Yes," he responded with a grin.

"After you saved that seat for me on the first day, why didn't you talk to me more?"

"Oh," he appeared to be embarrassed. "I was absolutely shocked about how beautiful you were. I hadn't seen you up close, just from a distance. It seems like you just get more beautiful every day."

"Erick! There are a lot of pretty girls at school!"

"No, not like you, I mean not for me anyway," he said as he traced my cheekbone with his hand.

My heart pounded in my chest as he leaned into kiss me. This was going to be my first kiss. I closed my eye in anticipation. I felt him draw back from me and opened my eyes in surprise.

"Oh, Lilly, you are only fourteen and I'm sixteen and this is not a normal attraction. I sometimes feel like I can't breathe until I see you in the morning. We have got to be careful. I'm not about to take anything with you lightly," he said quietly as he placed his hands on my arms and bent down to stare at me in the eyes.

"You don't like me like that?" I asked in confusion and with a confidence I didn't know I had.

"Yes, I like you way too much. It kind of scares me. I don't want to risk losing you, because the truth is that I plan on being around you for a very long time," he said with a smile. "Who knows? Maybe we'll be one of those couples that meets in high school and lives the rest of their lives together."

I smiled despite my disappointment and confusion. Does he mean he's not going to kiss me until we're old or older? He framed my face and kissed me on the cheek before he pulled me in and held me close. I again had a sense of security and my disappointment slipped away.

"Uh, is everything all right up there?" I jumped when I heard my dad shouting. Oh, good lord, I had completely forgotten I had informed him Sara was really upset and we needed to talk to her.

I crawled over and looked down at my dad standing at the bottom of the ladder. He was standing with his hands on his hips with Boozer on his shoulder, attempting to look inside his ear. He jumped when Boozer stuck his finger in his ear.

"Yeah, we're okay," I said as I wondered what I was going to say about Sara.

"Well, your mom has supper ready. Why doesn't Erick join us this evening?"

Erick crawled over and said, "I would like to, Mr. Callahan. Let me call my dad."

"All right then. Come on in if he gives his permission." We watched as he walked back inside with Boozer grooming his head.

"What are we going to tell my parents? We have got to pull ourselves together. My dad knew something serious was going on with Sara."

"Let's stick as close to the truth as we can without actually telling him everything," he said as he pulled his phone out of his pocket and called his dad. He was okay with him staying so we climbed down from the tree. I was a little nervous about talking to my parents. They knew when I wasn't telling the whole truth, so I would have to hope they would understand I was protecting Sara's privacy.

I was trembling so Erick stopped me and took my hands in his before saying, "We can do this. This is serious, so there will be a time we have to ask for help, but tonight...we're just teenagers. Let's try to be just that and nothing more. Sara is with her dad and safe right now."

"Okay," I said quietly before he pulled me in for a tight hug.

My mom already had the table set and I saw Erick's face light up when my mom told him she had made chicken enchiladas. He practically smacked his lips as he promptly took a chair. I tried not to laugh at his overly eager look. I ate lunch every day with Erick, and he appeared to have the appetite of a bear.

My dad said grace and I watched Erick out of the corner of my eye. He appeared to be looking for something in the room. He had been in our kitchen before, but this was the first time he had eaten with us. I didn't have to wonder long after he had food put on his plate. He openly looked around now as he appeared to almost be cradling his plate in a protective manner.

"Uh, where is Boozer?" he asked as he held onto his plate.

"He stays in his room when we eat," I said with a laugh. My mom was looking at him curiously, but didn't get a chance to comment.

"So, is your friend Sara all right? Her dad was pretty worried." My dad tried not to be intrusive, but I could tell by the look on his face he was worried and wanted answers.

"Well...she had some kids at school that were bullying her. They've been pretty mean, so we wanted her to know we would support her." I just looked at my plate, trying to avoid eye contact. I was glad Erick was there or I might have broken into tears again and told them everything. I knew I couldn't do that yet, trust was something Sara desperately needed right now, and my dad would have raised the roof in the school.

"You know your mom and I will be happy to help if it's needed. You know we believe there should be zero tolerance on bullying," he said as he looked between Erick and myself.

We both were saved from responding when the dryer timer went off. Our kitchen was very large and the washer and dryer were tucked into an adjoining utility room we could see from the table. My mom jumped into action and began pulling clothes from the dryer and folding them, piling them on the dryer.

I breathed a sigh relief as my dad talked about the aggravation of doing laundry. He told Erick how my mom wanted to design a line of fashionable disposable clothing. Erick didn't have any response. He was frozen in place with his fork half-way to his mouth and his mouth hanging open. I followed his line of vision to my mom who was folding clothes at lightning speed. She had a one, two, three, method that she used to empty a dryer in seconds or minutes, depending on the size of the load. This load took her less than a minute. She closed the dryer door and seemed to leap back into her chair and began eating again as if she had never got up.

I was in danger of choking. I had a mouth full of food as I broke into laughter. Erick was still frozen in place as if he had just witnessed the Tasmanian devil move through the kitchen. My dad couldn't hold it together either. My mom was just looking at us all like, "What?" Poor Erick was just speechless. He finally lowered his fork and looked at us.

"Has anyone ever recorded that? That was amazing! We could make a fortune on YouTube." He appeared serious, which made me and dad laugh harder. My mom just grinned at him and shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't like to spend all my time on menial tasks. In truth, Erick, I would rather just do things myself, so I don't have to wait while others take too much time." My mom grinned at Erick as she explained herself. Erick just nodded his head as though my mom had fully explained her ability to accomplish things at light speed.

My dad and I entertained Erick with tales of my mom's methods of laundry for the rest of the meal. Erick was literally amazed. My mom accused us of exaggerating, but we knew he couldn't really believe it until he watched her.

My dad and I looked at each other as everyone finished eating. We realized Erick was about to get his own proof on my mother's way of doing things. We prepared to get Erick out of the kitchen. We would let him watch from the safety of the living room.

"Uh, honey, do you need help with the dishes?" My dad asked this every night, but it was always the same.

"No, I'll take care of it," she said as she rose and began staking dishes.

My dad grabbed my hand and I grabbed Erick's hand and we literally pulled him out of the kitchen as fast as we could. He was a guest, we didn't want him killed.

Erick watched in awe as dishes went flying into the sink. My mom scrubbed them, placed them in the dishwasher, turned it on and wiped the counter and table clean in just moments. My dad and I snickered quietly as we watched Erick's look of astonishment. He jumped as she passed him and patted him on the shoulder.

"Come back soon. I'm going to watch my favorite shows. I have to record them, because the commercials literally drive me insane, and in some of the shows they talk too slow!"
Chapter Ten

I didn't sleep very well that night. I kept hearing yelling, laughing, or screaming when I dozed off and it would jolt me awake again. I don't know why Sara's story affected me so much, because I wasn't there and it didn't happen to me, but in some way, I felt emotionally tied to what happened. It may have just been the manner in which Sara had told us. I couldn't forget her haunted look or her tears, and in some ways, our bond had grown and surpassed even the bond I had with my best friend, Elizabeth.

I thought about calling Elizabeth, but for some reason it seemed like a terrible betrayal to Sara. Also, there was no way I could describe to her what happened in the treehouse today. It was like something in me was changed. I no longer cared about making a lot of friends or being popular. I didn't even particularly care what the other students thought about me anymore. There were much more important things in the world. I still cared very much about what Erick thought, but we were connected by much more than a mutual attraction. I think we both lost a part of our childhood in the treehouse that day. I needed him because Sara needed me, she needed us both.

I had given up and was just pacing in my bedroom when I heard pebbles hit my window. I looked out and standing in the yard looking up at me was Sara. She was in a large t-shirt and her feet were bare. I didn't even think about what I was doing. I grabbed my pillows and a couple of blankets, and made my way out to the backyard as quietly as possible. Sara almost looked like a ghost standing so still in the yard. We didn't even say anything to each other. I just handed her a pillow and quilt and we made our way to the tree and up into the treehouse. She laid the quilt down, and we placed our pillows side by side, and we laid down beside each other. She silently handed me her phone. I called Erick and he told me he was on his way. When he got there, he quietly removed his shoes and placed them beside our blankets. I held back the blanket and we all huddled together.

Sara fell asleep almost immediately. I listened to her breathing, and wasn't surprised went she abruptly woke up with a soft gasp. I made a shushing noise and smoothed her hair back from her face. I could tell a difference when she fell asleep again. She was in a deep sleep. Erick placed his arm around us both, and I suddenly felt a sense of peace.

I must have fallen asleep right away, because the next thing I knew, Erick was patting my arm. I opened my eyes and saw his sleepy look and realized it was close to dawn. I woke up Sara and we all climbed quietly down from the tree. Erick kissed me on the cheek before leading Sara back to her house. It dawned on me the only words that had been spoken were when I called Erick and told him we were in the treehouse and he had said he was on his way – only eight words.

I didn't go back into my house right away. I watched as Erick and Sara disappeared around a house, and I climbed back up into the treehouse, folded the quilts and placed the pillows on top. I placed them as far back in the treehouse as I could, so even if it rained, there would be no way they would get wet.

When I got into the house, I carefully made my way up the long staircase. It was an old house, and I managed to avoid all the creaks. I slowed down when I realized my bedroom door was open wider than what I had left it. I carefully slid through the door and froze in place. My dad's huge pit-bull Seymour sat on my window seat. I normally was very cautious of him, because he had been abused and turned into a fighting dog. My dad had rescued him from being euthanized and was determined to rehabilitate him. He was never allowed to be out of his large crate without my dad being present. He was going to work up to him being allowed to be out longer periods of time until he was sure he was safe again.

My dad hated the stigma about pit-bulls. They were not naturally dangerous, but humans could make them so, and they were bred in a way which made dangerous even more deadly. The power of their stocky bodies and extremely strong bite could kill a person easily.

"Seymour?" I whispered.

He looked at me before turning back to look out of the window. I approached him slowly, and he made no attempt to move or express any aggression. I slowly sat down on my bed and leaned over to follow his eyes out the window. He was looking at the treehouse. He turned and looked at me when I sat on the bed. It was like looking into the eyes of someone that had lived a very long life of suffering. He just stared at me for a few moments and jumped down, crossed the room, nudged the door open and left. Well, evidently, Seymour could get out of his crate whenever he wanted. He only let my dad think he was locking him up. I smiled as I remembered him staring at the treehouse. Somehow, Seymour knew our secrets.

I turned off my alarm, gathered something to wear and got into the shower to get ready for school. I expected to be tired but I wasn't. I had to talk to Eva today. If I did nothing else, I had to talk to her. I was afraid of what she would say. I was afraid she would tell me neither Erick nor I could do anything that would help Sara. I think Erick knew it too, but it was really our only option. I thought about talking to my parents, but thought I should talk to Eva first.

Erick and Sara were waiting for me at our usual meeting place. When we arrived at school, I looked around but didn't see Eva. It didn't matter, because Eva knew my schedule and usually sought me out when anything was going on. I realized now she must have known what had happened to Sara, and it was the reason she stuck so close to her. She probably knew Sara would eventually tell us what happened, and it would be better to talk to me after Sara was ready to talk about it. After what happened, trust would be very important to Sara.

We didn't even talk about the night before as we made our way through the halls. We began talking about the book "The Scarlett Letter," which had been assigned to us in Communication Arts. It was consensus between the three of us that the book was very confusing.

"I feel so sorry for Hester. It would be horrible to wear a symbol that made you a social outcast," Sara said. "It's totally unfair she's the one who had to wear it. They all knew there had to be someone else involved, but they chose to focus on her and blame the whole thing on her."

"It wasn't her fault," I said with a note of outrage. "No one truly knew what had happened."

"I feel like I'm reading Greek. The way they talk is so confusing," Erick said, "and is it just me or does the little girl seem a little creepy?"

"She's creepy!" Sara and I said in unison, which made us all laugh.

It felt good to laugh, but as it did last night, I felt a little guilty about it until I saw the light return to Sara's face. I felt relief because it was something I could control or something I could do to help Sara when the timing presented itself. I wished I was more like my dad who could make anyone laugh at any time.

When we readied ourselves for our first hour by the lockers, I looked at Sara and my tone of voice became serious. I looked at Erick, hoping he would back me up if Sara seemed hesitant.

"Sara, if any of those people approach you today, just leave. I don't care where you are or what's going on, just leave. Go to the nurse's office if you feel comfortable in doing that. Just tell her you don't feel good, if you can't think of anything to say."

"I don't think my dad would be able to come and pick me up," she said and I already noticed a look of dread forming on her face.

"Then tell her you need to stay there until someone can take you home. We'll come and get you and leave too if we need to," Erick suggested.

"You're not alone anymore, Sara." I reminded her. "Please, don't forget that."

Sara nodded her head as she looked at the ground. I felt the egg shells beneath my feet. She reached and squeezed both my and Erick's hands. I was relieved I had not upset her. As we separated to go to first hour, it dawned on me we all had just committed to skipping school if necessary.

It wasn't until second hour that I got a chance to see Eva. I never felt more relieved to see someone in my whole life. She was watching Sara as she entered her second hour class. I felt relief about that as well. I made my way to her side as quickly as possible.

"Eva, I really need to talk to you. Do you think we could talk privately and you could write me an excuse to be late for class?" I asked urgently.

She smiled at me. "Sara has told you about her suffering."

I nodded my head, but my mind also thought it was slightly strange the way she said it.

"Good, I knew the time was approaching for her to share with you."

"Erick and I are scared. She's very...fragile. What can we do to help her? What should we be saying? It's like no one has tried to really help her. I think her time in the hospital was more traumatic than helpful."  
"You are already helping in the most beneficial way for Sara. She needs to feel accepted. She needs to know there are people who care about her. Her dad has a difficult time in trying to handle the situation. He is a problem solver and is unable to just let her talk about her feelings without trying to offer solutions. He wants to make it all better for her."

"He could start by not allowing her to feel she is in some way to blame." My hands and body began to slightly tremble. "How can he just let her feel as though she did something wrong?"

"He's not a bad man. He just doesn't know how to help and isn't' even really sure what kind of help to ask for."

"I feel the same way, but there is no way I can just do nothing."

"Right now, you just need to continue doing what you have been doing. Sara is on a very painful journey, so all you can do is to be there to lean on when she needs you. Trust yourself when it comes to knowing what the right thing to do or say seems important. Erick will be of help as well. You must both be careful, because a wound to the soul can leave its mark on all those who are exposed to it."

I felt tears forming in my eyes. This was not what I wanted to hear, but I knew it was really just confirming what I already knew. I think I was kind of hoping for a magic pill to completely heal Sara.

"Lilly, this is very difficult to believe, but sometimes the cruelest things turn out to be a catalyst for much needed change. You are being everything she needs right now. I am proud of you, and please relay to Erick I feel the same way about him."

Eva opened my second hour classroom door, which signaled to me that she had shared with me everything she could for right now. I looked at the teacher as we stood in the doorway. She glanced up at me, but made no attempt to object to my tardiness. Eva must have had an out when it came to the teachers. They never commented on her delaying me from getting to class on time.

I looked back at Eva in regret. I so badly wanted her to tell me what to do. She just shook her in reassurance. Maybe she was right, and all I could do was be there for Sara to lean on. I just wanted to do more. I wanted to erase the haunted look from her face, and help her to regain the unbelievable light that could be seen shining so brightly from her eyes at times.

Eva had said we were already helping Sara and we needed to trust ourselves. She said she was proud of us and... What the heck did she mean about the wound to the soul? The thought interrupted what I had been thinking. How am I supposed to describe that to Erick? It was an odd remark to say the least. I just couldn't imagine talking to someone about their wounded soul.

My thoughts continued to race throughout the hour, and when the bell rang, I once again found myself in the position of not having a clue of what the teacher had talked about or if homework had been assigned. I had just been sitting with my pencil in my hand, but with no book or paper. I just closed my eyes in aggravation as people began getting up and leaving the classroom.

"Lilly? Are you, all right?" It was Ms. Louis. I liked her a lot. She always seemed to care about the students and not just about earning a paycheck. She was looking at me now with a genuine look of concern.

"Yes, I'm fine. I'm sorry I wasn't very attentive today," I said as I held up my pencil and realized I still had my backpack on my back. Ugh! Embarrassing!

"Lilly, I know it hasn't been easy starting school here. I have heard some rumors, and I want you to know if you ever have something you wish to talk about, I will do everything in my power to help." She placed her hand on my arm and offered some papers to me.

"This is what we talked about today. I'm going to hand it out tomorrow as a study guide." I took the papers from her with a smile of appreciation.

"Lilly, you have a right to attend school here without anyone harassing you. Please come to me if you need help."

I knew she was talking about Shelby's bullying me at school and the cyber-bullying, but it seemed so trivial to what Sara had been going through. I wished I could tell her about it, but I knew I couldn't do so without talking to Sara, and I was pretty sure she wouldn't be comfortable with it.

"Thank you. It means a lot that your willing to help," I said, hoping she knew I was sincere.

The rest of the day passed without incident, which was a great relief and probably due to Shelby being absent. When I realized she wasn't there, I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn't bring it to Sara's attention, because I could tell she already knew. She appeared to be more relaxed and even laughed on several occasions when I told her about my zombie behavior in my second class. She really laughed when Erick described my mom folding clothes and doing dishes. That's when I really saw her shine.

We had talked about the shine in Sara's eyes at times, but we didn't really know how to explain it. My mom had told me about it when I was younger, because she claimed I had it, but I had never seen anyone with a shine until Sara. They just seemed to have a light in their eyes and presence about them that made them stand out. Their smiles were so charismatic, they could draw peoples' attention to them even when they weren't talking. I now realized that while it caused most people to really like them, it caused others to really envy them.

At the end of the day, we were surprised to see Jeff standing at our locker with Erick. I knew Jeff was one of Erick's better friends, because he sometimes endured the seniors in order to talk to him. Jeff didn't care for the jocks. Erick had told me Jeff was a good athlete who made straight A's, but he had quit playing football because of the cocky senior boys.

I looked at Sara nervously, but she didn't seem to be bothered to see him with Erick. I checked his name off the list I had been making in my head all day. I couldn't help but look at every senior boy and girl and wonder if he or she had been a participant at Shelby's party. I had watched them today to see if I could tell if they were the kind of person who could do something like that, but it was just impossible to tell by looking. I knew Erick would have a much better chance of figuring out who might have been there.

"Hey!" I said as we got closer. Erick reached out to grab my hand and pull me to his side. He had been doing this more often over the last several weeks. Today, he pulled Sara to him as well. I grinned because it reminded me of a territorial animal. These are members of my pride and under my protection.

"It's my girls," he said in a manner that solidified my assessment of his behavior. "Jeff was going to give you girls a ride to your house today. I talked to the football coach today, and he agreed to let me participate in practice. I just want to see how my leg is holding up. I'll come to your house after I'm finished."

I hadn't known Erick for a very long time, but it didn't keep me from knowing him well. Something was up and I was determined to find out what it was. I pretended to be agreeable, but after he vanished towards the gym, I told Jeff we wouldn't need a ride. I put on a good act of just remembering my dad was planning on picking us up, but thanking him anyway. I noticed his eyes lingered on Sara and his face was slightly flushed. Hmm, definitely some interest there.

Sara looked at me in confusion, but told Jeff thank you for the offer. Sara almost always knew when I needed her to play along. She looked to me for an answer once Jeff disappeared.

"Come on, we're going to watch practice today. I'll call your dad and tell him we'll be a little late," I said as I grabbed her hand and dragged her to the back entrance of the school.
Chapter Eleven

"Lilly, what's going on?" Sara asked as she allowed herself to be pulled along.

"I don't know, but Erick is up to something," I replied.

"Like what?" She laughed at my suspicious tone. "You make it sound like he has a devious plan."

"I don't know if it's devious or not, but he doesn't want us to know about it, so, of course, I must know about it."

She laughed again as we snuck behind the bleachers in the football field. We had a perfect view of the whole team. They were dressed out and stretching before practice. The coach and his assistant were standing off to the side talking. It wasn't long until they began running drills. I finally found Erick and turned to Sara for confirmation. I had never seen him dressed out, but I was certain it was my Erick.

She didn't even have a trace of a smile on her face anymore. She was watching some of the players. I felt a chill go up my spine. I tried to follow her eyes to some of the players, but it was difficult to tell which particular ones she was focusing on. What have I done? I thought. I should have known some of her perpetrators would be out on the field. I watched in dread as several of them stopped between drills and removed their helmets. Jacob was one of them. I grabbed Sara's hand.

"We're leaving," I said. "I was stupid to come here."

Sara wouldn't budge. I heard her whisper. "Oh no!"

I looked out on the field and saw the team had their helmets back on and were getting into formation for another drill. I tried to determine exactly what it was upsetting Sara. I continued to watch as they squared off against each other. It finally hit me what was about to happen. I walked from behind the bleacher and watched as the players began moving. Everything seemed to slow down as I saw Erick rush at Jacob. My feet moved me closer to the fence and I gasped when their impact made a large cracking noise ring through the air. Erick sprang to his feet, but I watched as Jacob lay still on the ground. He slowly rolled to one side, clutching his ribs.

The coach began blowing his whistle. I saw some of the other players gather around Jacob laying on the ground. Erick stepped back, took his helmet off and rested his other hand on his hip. He was looking at Jacob with contempt. Jacob got to his feet, pulled off his helmet and swung it at Erick's face. Erick blocked it and upper cut Jacob right in the jaw. Jacob hit the ground hard again. The coach began yelling and told them to get off the field. He would be talking to them later.

Erick walked off the field without a word. Some of the other players tried to help Jacob to his feet, but he began swinging his helmet at them in his rage, trying to hit them in the head. One of the coaches ripped the helmet out of his hand and told him he was done.

I realized I had a death grip on the pole of the fence. Erick was walking towards the gymnasium very slowly. He stopped and looked back as though he was waiting on something. Oh my god, I thought, he's waiting for Jacob. I took off running.

"Erick! Erick!" I was practically screaming. I realized Jacob was leaving the field and I had to get to Erick before he did. "Erick, No!" In my horror, I saw Erick turn around and begin walking to meet Jacob.

I heard Sara yell behind me. "Stop him, Lilly!"

I felt as though I was very far away. Erick was close to Jacob now and he planted his feet in some type of stance, bracing himself for an attack or to attack. I couldn't tell the difference.

Erick finally heard me right before Jacob reached him. I didn't think he was going to stop, but he threw his helmet to the ground. He took the last few steps and grabbed the front of Jacob's uniform. I heard Jacob starting to yell.

"What the hell...," Jacob yelled at Erick but was cut-off by Erick's grasp, twisting the neck of his uniform tightly around his throat.

I finally reached him, but quickly stood back as he shook Jacob by his uniform.

"How does it feel to have someone bigger and stronger than you beat on you, you bastard!" Erick's voice was full of rage.

"What are you talking about, Mchail?" Jacob tried to dislodge Erick's hold on him but was unsuccessful. Erick's rage was fueling his strength.

Erick practically lifted him off of his feet as he turned him to see Sara standing back watching them. Sara was shaking and crying as she stood with her hands over her mouth. My breath caught in my throat as I noticed her small pale form start to back up before she turned and took off running. I was stuck in indecision of should I go or stay.

"If you ever even look at her again, I'll kill you!" Erick said in a deadly threat.

"Hey, dude, you know she wanted...

He didn't get a chance to finish. Erick punched him in the face hard enough to knock him off his feet again. He started to go for him again, so I threw myself between them. I could hear Jacob getting to his feet behind me, but like most bullies, he was a coward. He began backing off and ran around us into the building. I closed my eyes in dread as I heard Erick's coach yell behind me.

"Erick Mchail! Get into my office right now!" I turned to look at him and he had a shocked look on his face.

Erick put his hands on my shoulder and turned me away from the coach. I felt sick about what I just seen, but I didn't want Erick to get into trouble. I held on to his arms as if they could take him away from me.

"Go, find Sara, and I'll meet you at the treehouse," he said quietly. He released me and fell into step beside his coach. I heard the coach asking him in disbelief if he really just witnessed him fighting over a girl. I closed my eyes in dread when I realized he thought it was about me.

I took off running for the second time that day. It appeared I was developing a pattern of running to save Sara, but I also knew I was running away from my hurt and fear as well. I knew where Sara was going, but I still felt the need to reach her as soon as possible. The vision of her shaking and crying accompanied by the visions of what may have happened that night gave me energy I didn't realize I had. I also was worried about what would happen to Erick. I knew the school had zero tolerance for violence. He could get suspended or they could file a police report.

I was almost to our neighborhood when the stitch in my side became almost unbearable. My body wasn't cooperating with my brain's sense of urgency. I jumped from a curb and tripped on a pot hole. I went down hard. My hands were badly scratched, and as I pushed myself to feet, I felt a sharp sting in one of my knees. I took off again but was only able to jog. I could feel blood running down my leg and a slow burn in my knee every time I bent it.

I was breathing really hard by the time I reached my house. I braced myself on the back fence before I went through the door. The door wasn't latched so I knew I had been correct in assuming Sara would return to the treehouse. It had become our getaway from reality. I climbed the ladder to see her sitting with her knees pulled to her chest again.

"I'm sorry," she said as I moved to sit by her.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," I replied as I put my arms around her shoulders.

"It's just that I had kind of fantasied about Jacob being beat up for what he did, but when I saw it, it just reminded me of the violence of that night. It didn't feel good, it felt...brutal. It made me feel like I just couldn't be there. It wasn't like watching the bad guy get beat up in a movie, it was someone I knew and I've never seen anger like that in him before. I did that. I told him about what happened and it caused him to be violent." She wiped the tears off her face with her fingers.

"It bothered me too. I didn't know Erick was capable of doing that," I said quietly.

"No, Lilly, no, that's not him. Please, believe me. I've known Erick all my life and he is not violent. I just shouldn't have told him. I should have followed my dad's advice and not talked about it. It just caused more bad things to happen. Please, don't be mad at Erick! Please!"

"I'm not really. I guess I've never been around someone that's violent before, and you're right; it's not what it looks like on TV. It's scary and yet I know Erick would never hurt me. At least, I don't think he would," I said with a little doubt in my voice.

"I've made you doubt him. He's not violent. He's one of the good guys I promise! He's always been the one that breaks up fights at school. He never fights himself and he always tells them to find a different way to settle an argument, so you see, it's my fault. What I told him upset him."

I thought about it and couldn't imagine Erick ever getting physical with me. He had a more protective nature. I decided to talk to my dad about it. I could talk to him about anything. I also knew I needed to talk to another adult. I was sure Eva was right, but I just needed to be sure.

"I think you're right," I said in an attempt to appease Sara. I looked at her pale face and knew I needed to get her mind on other things. I searched my mind and remembered something I had been wanting them to do with me.

"Hey, when we moved in, we found all of this really old stuff in our attic. You want to go look at it?" I asked.

"You can walk in your attic?" Sara asked with curiosity.

"Yeah, my dad said a lot of older houses had big attics. Let's go open some old trunks and see what we can find. It will be like a treasure hunt," I said as I started to get up. My brain wouldn't stop racing as I felt an urge to move. I almost wished I could begin running again.

"Girls?" I heard my dad yell from below.

I crawled over and looked down at him. "Yeah, we're up here."

"Is everything okay?" I looked at Sara with an uh-oh face before answering him.

"Yeah, we're fine. We were just going to come down and look through the attic," I said, hoping he wouldn't protest.

"That's fine. Sara's dad was wondering where she was and I told him I thought she may be here." I heard him talking to Sara's dad and saying Sara was just about to call him. I wanted to hug my dad for covering for us, but I realized he knew something was going on. He wouldn't have done so if he hadn't thought it was a very touchy issue. I would have to talk to him soon.

My dad began walking back into the house as we made our way down the tree. I could tell Sara was relieved she didn't have to talk right now with her dad. We made our way through the back door, grabbed a soda out of the fridge and some granola bars out of the cabinet and headed for the attic. I took my phone out of my bag and looked at it.

"I told Erick we would meet him in the treehouse. He had to talk to the coach," I said as I tried to usher Sara quickly through the house before my mom could see her pale face and red eyes.

"Is Erick going to get into trouble?" Sara asked with apprehension.

"I don't know, but he said he would meet us at the treehouse. I'm going to text him and tell him to come inside."

"I hope not. Lilly, if I have to, I'll go talk to the coach."

"Let's see what happens before we make any plans," I said as I realized she had the same thought I had. The violence had upset me, but I didn't want Erick to get into trouble when Jacob had never been forced to face the consequences of his actions.

We climbed the stairs to the attic. I opened the door and reached inside for the light switch. Someone at some time had electric run to the attic. We walked in and looked around. I pointed to various trunks and things covered in blankets.

"To tell the truth, I've been a little afraid to come up here by myself," I said with a grin.

"Don't worry, Lilly, Erick will be here soon, so, don't be scared." She shifted a nervous glance around the room before saying, "There's nothing but the past up here. It's just waiting for us to explore!" Sara's voice was filled with excitement. She set her soda and unopened granola bar on a nearby crate and approached something tall that had been covered with a large sheet. She peeked behind the sheet. I heard her gasp.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's a mirror. A very old cheval mirror. It's beautiful!" I smiled at her excited tone. This had been a good idea.

"Well, take it off and let's look at it."

She pulled the large sheet off and a tall oval mirror framed by wood was exposed. It was taller than both of us and stood on an easel. We could see ourselves standing side by side.

"Hey! I thought I was taller than you!" I said with a laugh.

"Nope, I think we're both a little short."

"That's what Erick said! He said my legs were like a dachshund's little stunted legs."

We both laughed as we began exploring. We found furniture, old paintings, a rocking horse, lots of books and old clothing. Sara opened a large wooden trunk and gasped. She pulled back a type of tissue paper and found old dresses of silk materials. She pulled out a just above the knee length white dress with small tassels on the bottom. There was a white head band with a small white feather sprouting from the top. It looked brand new.

"Sara, I think it's like what they wore in the 1920's – a flapper dress." I held it up to her and it looked like it could have been made for someone her size. "Try it on!"

She glanced toward the door and realized it would be easy to hide if someone walked in. She then stripped off her shoes, jeans and shirt. She held the dress up to her and smelled it. Most of the things we had found smelled of moth balls or mold. She slipped it over her head.

"It doesn't even smell." She adjusted the dress and set it clearly on her shoulders. I felt uneasy as I watched her put on the dress, but I made sure to smile when she looked at me. She ran over to the mirror and I followed close behind her.

"Sara, you look beautiful!" I ran back to get the odd little band with the feather as she tried to smooth down her hair. I set it carefully over her head. I was shocked the little white feather was in such decent shape. We both looked in awe. She could have walked out of the early twentieth century. Our eyes followed the dress down all the way down to her knees. We both looked at her socks on her feet and rushed back to the trunk. Sure enough, there was a pair of dainty white shoes under another layer of paper. She put them on her feet and found they were just a little bit too big. We rushed back over to the mirror.

"Wow, that's really me. I look so different!"

"That's amazing. Wait, let me take a picture! I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and took three to four pictures.

"Don't show them to anyone."

"I won't. Well, wait, can I show Erick?" I held the phone out so we could look at the pictures.

"Yeah, he's okay, but no one else."

"I promise, but you look amazing!" I wished she could see how pretty she was, but she didn't seem to like anything about herself anymore.

"Lilly?" Erick was standing at the bottom of the attic stairs.

The day's events ran back through my head as I yelled, "Come up here, Erick!"

"Wait!" Sara yelled loudly. "It's old! Don't come up here, Erick!"
Chapter Twelve

I looked at Sara in bewilderment. I guess she didn't want Erick seeing her in the white dress, but Erick appeared to be ignoring her, because he sprinted up the stairs in seconds. I looked at him and waited for Sara's objection.

"No, it's okay," Erick said as he gave Sara an odd look.

Sara said, "Oh, okay..., what happened Erick? I'm so sorry I made you so upset. Please, don't hit anybody else."

The vision of violence ran through my head as I looked at Erick. There was no anger remaining on his face. My instincts took over and I walked over to put my arms around him. I just knew somehow, I didn't need to worry about violence around him. He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly as he rested his cheekbone on the top of my head.

"I'm sorry, Lilly. I know I scared you. I was just so angry and I didn't want you to see that."

"What did the coach say? Are you in trouble?" I asked as I leaned back to meet his eyes.

"Well, it didn't start out so well. I was still too angry. He warned me he could file a police report for just defending myself, and I told him to file it, because I didn't give a shit!" Erick shook his head with a laugh when Sara and I gasped.

"I know, not cool. Fortunately, he's known me a long time and he knows I'm not like that. He wanted to know what was going on."

"What did you tell him?" Sara asked with dread.

"Sara, I told him just enough to understand why Jacob is dangerous. I'm sorry. I know you didn't want us to talk about it, but..." He trailed off as he walked to take both of Sara's hands in his own. "We don't want him doing this to someone else." His eyes held a plea for understanding.

Sara looked at him and didn't say anything. She looked down at her feet.

"I know," she finally said, "I don't want him to either, but I'm just so embarrassed, ashamed I allowed it to happen."

"Sara, every victim feels like they are to blame, but it's the exact opposite," I said quietly. "You're a survivor. I understand if you don't want to go through the legal system. It would be really hard to sit on a witness stand. I honestly don't know if I could do it, but please don't feel shame for something Jacob did."

I knew I was taking a risk by saying that, so I wasn't surprised when she covered her ears with her hands and walked away from us.

"She's right, Sara. You can't blame yourself." Erick looked at me in concern when Sara began rocking back and forth on her legs. It seemed like we had arrived at a point in which we were just repeating things.

I went over and pulled Sara's hands away from her ears and held them in my own. I hugged her to me to stop her rocking. She was crying again.

"Sara, I said that wrong. You're not a victim. I know that, we both do. I just don't want you to feel like he broke you, because you did something I don't know if I could do. You went back to that school and faced every one of those people!" I met Erick's eyes with concern. I needed to talk with him alone.

"Do you think he thinks he broke me?" she asked.

"Well, he doesn't now!" Erick said vehemently. "He knows you're strong because you talked to people who would find some way to hold him accountable."

She shook her head as she backed up and went to go get her clothes. She bent to pick them up.

"Does the coach know it was me?"

"No, I promised you." I saw the relief on her face.

"Sara, we wouldn't do that," I said to further assure her. She smiled at me before stepping behind the large mirror. She wiped off the post of the mirror and as she changed she hung the white dress on the pole. I took the dress and folded it up. She reached around the mirror and handed me the head dress. I looked at Erick and mouthed the word "stay" to him. He shook his head.

"I feel better when I'm around you guys. You make me feel like I'm safe. You can tell people you really trust, because I know what it's like to carry a secret like that...and if will help other people." She stepped from behind the mirror and hugged first me and then Erick.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she said as she tied her tennis shoe.

"Wait, Sara, I think we came up here for a reason today. I think this dress belongs to you. You were supposed to find it. It's like a treasure." She laughed as Erick looked at the dress in doubt. It was obvious he didn't think there was anything "treasure like" about the dress.

"Thank you, I love it. Are you sure your parents won't mind?" she asked as I handed her the shoes.

"No, I know they won't," I replied. She waved as she went down the stairs. I almost followed her. I was getting to the point I didn't like the idea of letting her out of my sight.

"What did Eva say?" Erick asked immediately.

"She didn't say much. She just said we should continue to do what we're doing."

"I don't understand. What are we doing?"

"Just being her friend and being supportive I think."

"Well, of course, we're going to be her friend, but there has to be something we can do to really help."

"She said something very strange; like out of a book or something. She said to be careful because wounds to the souls can mark those who have been exposed to them."

Erick raised one of his eyebrows. "Really? That sounds ominous and dramatic," he said with a laugh.

I laughed as well. "I know, right?"

A shadow crossed Erick's face as he walked a few paces away. He began looking around at all the old stuff in the attic. I watched him as he stopped by a painting that was partially covered by a cloth. He pulled the cloth off to expose a painting of a large ship and a lighthouse.

"Look at this; someone liked the sea," He stooped to pick up something and I saw that it was the end of a rope. "Yeah, they may have even had a boat themselves. This looks like something you would use to secure it to a dock or something. I don't know. I don't know much about boats."

"Me either," I said as I crossed to look at the painting. "I like it though."

He shook his head in agreement. "There's a lot of history up here, Lilly. I would imagine through the years this house has been owned by many owners. Do you like living here?"

"Yeah, I do. I wasn't sure at first because it's so big and there's only three of us, but it feels like home now. You're going to think it sounds strange, but it's like the house is happy to have someone live in it."

"You're right. I mean houses aren't alive, but sometimes when they're old, they can seem to have a presence or something."

"Exactly, like the treehouse. It feels like its special...or tied to special times or something."

"I think it is too. I know we're teenagers, but I love that treehouse and the tree that holds it. It reminds me of being a kid when you wanted a clubhouse or something and things like how long you got to spend outside were really important. I always liked playing outside. I didn't play video games or anything like that much."

I smiled. I think I was falling in love with Erick Mchail. I could see how he was comparing serious things like what happened to Sara to a childhood of not knowing about such ugly truths.

"Lilly! What happened to your hands?" He had taken both of my hands in his and was looking at the scraped palms.

"Oh, I forgot!" I laughed. "I'm such a klutz. I tripped on a pot hole."

"You were running. You were running to reach Sara." He wasn't laughing. "Come on, let's clean them up."

I nodded my head. I flipped off the light switch and we made our way down the stairs to the bathroom. He helped me to wash the scrapes on my hands and got a clean towel to pat them dry. I watched his face as he dried them. I suddenly remembered my knee and on cue, I could feel a slow burn. Why hadn't I felt that before?

"Oh, my knee!" I said as I hopped up on the large bathroom counter and pulled the leg of my jeans up. My knee was a bloody mess.

"Oh, my god, Lilly!" He immediately began cleaning the wound. "Do you have any Neosporin?"

"I think there's some in the drawer," I said. I never even imagined a boy like Erick caring about my skinned knee. It made me feel special.

"Lilly?"

"Yeah."

"You know that thing Eva said about the soul?"

"Yes."

"Look at what I did today. In that moment when Jacob said Sara wanted him, I wanted to kill him. I've never felt like that before. I don't think I would have, but I wanted to seriously hurt him and I didn't care what happened to me."

"I know. You scared me, but I don't think you would have."

He smiled at me and rested his forehead against mine before kissing me on the cheek.

"Eva said she was really proud of you," I whispered.

"She did?"

I shook my head.

"That's cool." He sounded genuinely pleased. "She probably won't like what I did this afternoon."

"No, but I think she will understand. I do. I mean I do now. I also saw the toll this is taking on Sara. It's much worse than we even imagined."

"What do you mean?"

"Erick, when she changed her clothes, I could see every bone in her body. I don't even know how she's walking around. I don't think she's eating...like anything! I was trying to remember if I had seen her eat at school. I know she gets a tray, but..."

"She just pushes the food around. I thought it was because she might be more nervous at school or something."

"What should I do?"

"I think you should talk to your mom and dad. Sara said we could and I think it's getting serious. I don't think Eva can help with this."

"I can't betray Sara's trust. If I lose her trust, I'll lose her," I said. I could feel the tears building in my eyes. I felt angry; angry at myself for being so weak and angry at Eva because I was so scared, and really angry at Jacob and Shelby for creating all this. This was too big. I wanted to talk to my parents more than anything, but I was grown up now and they couldn't fix this. There was no one they could talk to or nothing they could do to make this go away. It couldn't be taken back and Sara would never have that light again.

Later that evening, I decided to follow Erick's advice. My dad was looking over a small book of birds in his study. I wandered in and pretended to look at some of his books. I didn't even know how to start a conversation about it. I was just about to say something when Boozer slipped through the crack in the door and jumped up on my dad's desk. He had a bottle of beer in his hand.

"No, Boozer, you can't have a beer!" he said without looking up.

Boozer reached out and smacked him on top of the head. It made an actual smack noise which made me giggle. My dad looked at me and shook his head in aggravation. He tried to take the bottle out of Boozer's hand, but Boozer smacked his hands away.

"I don't care how long you sit there. I'm not going to open it for you," he said. He tried to take the bottle again and Boozer hopped in circles around his desk. Not only did my dad fail to get the bottle of beer, Boozer now had his book too. He jumped off the desk and the book fell into the floor. The monkey reclaimed it and drug it across the room and sat on it. The message was fairly clear; no beer, no book!

I laughed at the look of absolute frustration on my dad's face. I loved that monkey. He could take you from completely devastated to laughing. For some reason, the exchange gave me courage.

"Dad, Erick got into a fight today."

He was startled as he looked up at me. "Oh, Lilly, I don't like that. You know there is no justification for violence."

"It was over Sara."

My dad was quiet for a moment. "Lilly, her dad told me she had been unwell for a while, but he didn't say what was wrong with her. I somehow get the feeling it doesn't have anything to do with Erick."

I didn't say anything. I just sat there staring at him.

"You know what she reminds me of? A small wounded rabbit. I know it's not right to compare her to an animal, but that's what I do. She's in pain and I'm not sure if it is physical or psychological, but I have to admit she worries me."

"She is," I said.

"Is what?"

"She's wounded."

"And that's why Erick became violent today? Was he trying to protect her, because violence is still not the answer?"

"He knows that. He really does," I assured him.

"Okay, well then, start at the beginning and tell me what's going on with Erick and Sara."

I began at the beginning as Sara had, and told him the whole story. At one point, he abruptly got out of his chair and began pacing. I could see the concern on his face.

"I hope Erick knocked the shit out of him!" he said as he came to a complete stop before me. For some reason, it made me want to laugh, because it all was just too horrible. It was so horrific my dad went from no justification for violence to hoping Erick "knocked the shit out of him." I also felt relieved that my dad could see how Erick may have reached the emotional state to use violence.

"Dad, I think Sara is in bad shape, but we have to be very careful because we may make things worse. Today, I saw her change into an old dress in the attic, and I could see every single bone in her body."

"She's badly traumatized," he said without looking at me. I could tell he was thinking about how to handle the situation. He had already talked to her dad, and it appeared he was as clueless as what we were.

"Lilly, your mom is good with people. Let's talk to her about how to approach Sara's dad," he suggested.

"Okay, but I don't want Sara to think we're all talking about her. She just needs someone to really be supportive. Her dad doesn't want to file legal charges.

He whirled to look at me. "What the hell?"
Chapter Thirteen

"Dad! I know everyone thinks that's the right thing to do, but look at Sara. Do you honestly believe she's in any shape to go through that? She already tried to commit suicide once! We can't force her to go through a legal system that puts the victim on the stand and attacks her character!"

There were tears in my eyes again as I stood to confront him.

"You're afraid she might do something to hurt herself again?"

I just shook my head, and I felt a traitorous tear roll down my face.

"What about treatment?" he asked.

"She's already been hospitalized for months. I think this is just as good as it gets right now. She's back at school. and if they'll just leave her alone, I think we can get through this somehow."

"I can't believe the same people that have been bullying you have done this. I've called and called the school, and they say they will take care of it, but nothing happens, and then they say they can't talk to you due to maintaining the other student's confidentiality. Sara's dad said the same thing, but I had no idea it was to such a severe degree." He was pacing again.

"Erick and I didn't know what to do so we talked to a counselor at school, and she said Sara was on a painful journey, and we were doing everything we could to help."

My dad stopped to look at me and shook his head. "I don't know, Lilly. I think something more needs to be done. I would have you out of that school so fast."

"You mean like home schooling or homebound teaching?"

"Yes!" My dad put his fingers up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he gave his emphatic response.

"How will I see her then? I've got to be with her! I have to watch over her!" My voice was getting louder over the prospect of being cut off from Lilly. I knew she needed me and Erick.

"Lilly, this is too serious, honey. This is more than any of us can handle. She needs to be under medical supervision." He was trying to pacify me, but I was just getting more upset.

"No! I shouldn't have even told you! You can't do that to Sara!" I yelled as the tears now flowed freely down my cheeks.

"Lilly, calm down. I don't have the power to put Sara in home schooling, so let's not..."

"What on earth is going on in here? I could hear you all the way upstairs, Lilly," my mom interrupted. She was standing in the doorway holding Boozer and his bottle of beer. It almost seemed as though the monkey had run to get my mom.

"Mary, come in and talk to us. I'm not doing a very good job here," my dad said as I stood with my fists clenched at my side.

Boozer began making some screeches noises, dropped his beer bottle in mom's hand and jumped on my dad and began smacking him on the head again. He then scurried up to my shoulder and began patting me on the back. I couldn't help it; my tears became giggles of hysteria before I began crying again. My dad held out his arms and I walked into them as he held me close.

"Tell me what's happened," my mom said as she watched us. Boozer had begun grooming my dad's hair as a gesture of making peace. "Let's sit at the kitchen table."

As we took a seat at the kitchen, I decided to let my dad tell my mom everything I had told him. I could see the growing alarm on her face. She couldn't sit any longer. She got up, grabbed a tangerine off the counter and began peeling it. She took Boozer's bottle from him and offered him the tangerine slice by slice. He crammed his little cheeks full as he kept his hand held out for the next slice. She eventually handed him the whole thing and he took off with it. I could feel her worried gaze as my dad told her everything right up to us talking about approaching Sara's dad about getting her out of that school. She came to sit beside me and I was worried about what she would decide.

"What concerns you about me talking to Sara's dad?" she asked. I always like the way my mom approached things. She never asked "why" because the word why always made me feel like I needed to defend myself. "Why do you feel like that?" or "why did you do that?" were questions that made me feel defensive even if they weren't intended to do so.

"Sara is hanging on by a thread, mom. She needs me. I can feel it. If her dad tells her she's not going to be able to go to school, she'll feel alone again," I said, hoping she was going to understand what I meant.

"What if you were still able to see her every day, and we could even convince her dad to let her spend more time over here – under our supervision? We could be an extra pair of eyes watching over her, keeping her safe. We can at least ask," she said tentatively.

"Would you please let me talk to Sara before you contact her dad?" I asked, knowing with the severity of the situation they may very well say no.

My dad and her looked at each other. I felt as though I had just laid out all of Sara and her dad's private business to everyone. I suddenly felt that sense of exhaustion again.

"I think we can do that as long as you talk to her fairly soon," she said.

"What if her dad feels like we should mind our own business?" I asked.

"I think I can approach him without offending him, and I think I should talk to her counselor too. She probably knows her dad better than we do."

"Is she working with Sara right now?" my dad asked.

"Yes, she told us that really all we could do is to be supportive."

"That's good," my dad said with relief. "Let's make sure she can still work with Sara if she's not there every day."

I hadn't thought about Eva not being able to see Sara anymore. I also had never told my parents about Eva looking like the person I thought I saw on the highway during our drive to Missouri. I had really reached the conclusion that I couldn't really remember what the woman on the road looked like, and when I saw Eva, her eyes had make me think it was the same woman. I really didn't believe in premonitions, but I also had thought maybe my moving to Missouri was supposed to happen. Maybe it was kind of fate or something. I would never regret meeting Erick or Sara, but I could have done without the bullying and the fear and dread of seeing certain people five days a week. There was a part of me that did feel as though I was exactly where I was supposed to be right now.

My thoughts were interrupted when something streaked by me. It was Boozer, of course, he came back to reclaim his beer. My dad was back to trying to take it from him, and Boozer was running in circles, trying to avoid him.

"99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down, and..." My dad broke into song. Boozer dropped the bottle and tried to cover my dad's mouth with both of his hands. My dad had to keep trying to pull his hands away so the little monkey didn't put his hand in his mouth and he could continue to sing. My mom and I had to laugh as Boozer acted like he was in distress.

When I went to bed that night, I found my mom had put new quilts and pillows on my bed. She had left a small note warning me to remain vigil due to the possible presence of a bedding thief. It stated Mr. Boozer Callahan would be offering a small reward. I snorted at the thought of a reward from Boozer. Whatever it was, it wouldn't belong to him. It would be something he had stolen from one of us. He had once stolen a slice of an apple from Man O' war, our little burro, and made him chase him in circles around the big tree.

I sank down to sit on my bed and thought about how I was going to talk to Sara. I didn't know if she would be upset about me talking to my parents. I just couldn't hold the secret any longer. When I had seen her emaciated form today, I felt overwhelmed with fear. Something was going to have to change. Sara was very sick.

I reclined back on my bed as I thought of everything that had happened. I had feared maybe I might not make any friends at my new school, but I never dreamed it would be this nightmare. I hated to admit I wanted some adult to take control of the situation and get it all stopped. I had already been called a "snitch" and a "tattle tale" after my parents had called the school. I didn't even care about that anymore. I just wanted someone to stop it all.

I thought about a boy named Andrew Moss I had attended school in New Mexico with from kindergarten through middle school. He had special needs and was the constant target of bullies. I remember feeling sorry for him, but I asked myself now why I didn't speak up and try to help him. I didn't like to admit it to myself, because I was pretty sure I knew the reason. I think before becoming friends with Elizabeth, I was just glad it wasn't me they were picking on. I felt ashamed now as I thought about it. I knew he had been hurt emotionally, but I wondered if anyone had literally attacked him as well.

Andrew had been told by one of our teachers one time the old saying: "Stick and Stones can break your bones, but words can never hurt you." That was not true. It was one of the biggest untrue things you could ever tell a kid. Words hurt far worse than sticks and stones. From the time they said them, you carried them with you for the rest of your life, telling yourself they were wrong, but still fighting the way they always made you feel and the way they shaped your identity. You were the person who was called stupid or ugly. As hard as you tried, you still identified yourself with those words.

I thought about how Shelby had called me "Rainbow Girl," and ever since then when someone would say something about a rainbow, I would think I'm somehow attached to that word. I had never been exposed to racism before coming to Missouri. It really hurt. I was different. I wasn't as good. I knew I was completely wrong to let Shelby get to me, but now I wasn't just me. I tried to be kind, friendly, compassionate, hard-working, and honest, but now I also was "Rainbow Girl." I had been called "beautiful" and "intelligent" at least a hundred times, but it didn't matter, because "Rainbow Girl" was what I remembered and thought about every day. I didn't have the courage to admit it to anyone but myself, and I used Sara's pain to hide from it.

Then there was the type of bullying that Sara had endured. What had happened to her would alter her life forever. It was more than illegal, it was the worst of humanity. What gave people the feeling they had a right to treat other people in that manner? What made them feel so superior they would risk committing such a serious offense and justify it to themselves?

I sat up on my bed as I thought about how I was using the severity of Sara's pain to hide from my own. I was using Sara's pain to make me feel stronger. I had told her not to feel like a victim, but I was using her to not feel like a victim myself. How could I do that? How could I use Sara like that? Was I using her to feel less than a victim, or was I using her pain to make myself feel stronger? Either way, I shouldn't pretend to Sara that I was stronger than she was, and allow her to believe I was too strong for Shelby's bullying to bother me.

My own thoughts were confusing me. The truth was I really was more worried about Sara than myself, but I also knew I could no longer allow Sara to feel like she was alone. Erick had asked me that day in the treehouse why I had asked Sara if I could talk to her about my secrets too, and I had told him it was because everyone needed to feel like a friendship was a two-way street. I needed to make it true. I would talk to Sara about it when I talked to her about getting help.

I was hit by the sense of exhaustion again. I got to my feet and put my pajamas on. I went to the bathroom, washed my face, and brushed my teeth before yelling downstairs, and telling my mom and dad that I loved them and was going to bed. I always kept my bedroom door cracked since moving to our new house. It was so much bigger than our other house, and my bedroom was no longer right across the hall from my parent's room. I didn't want to feel like I was all alone in a great big house. I noticed my parents had started leaving on a small lamp sitting out in the hallway. It helped me to sleep better, so maybe I was a little afraid. I shook my head as I realized denial was another way I hid my insecurity.

I turned off my bedroom light, turned down my bed, but instead of crawling into bed, I went and sat on my window seat and looked at the treehouse. There was something about the large tree that held it. I realized it was so big the treehouse could have been made bigger. It could maybe even hold a second story. I smiled as I thought about presenting the idea of enlarging the treehouse to Sara and Erick. I was fairly certain they would want to do it.

It was getting late, but I was watching for Sara. It didn't look like she would be coming tonight. I didn't know rather to feel relieved or worried. I sent Erick a text to see if he had heard anything from her. He replied right away that he hadn't. He asked me to just send him a one word "treehouse" text if she returned.

When I crawled in bed, I found that despite my exhaustion, I was unable to sleep. I took deep breathes and counted backwards from a hundred. I could hear my parents going to bed and the house quieting down for the night. I was just beginning to doze off, when my bedroom door creaked open. I was startled at first, but creaks and old doors sometimes moved slightly due to the not entirely level floor boards. Others might have thought of ghosts, but ghosts didn't really bother me. I didn't think a ghost would hurt me. In fact, when I was really young, my mom said I talked about ghosts a lot. I think I had watched movies and allowed my imagination to get the best of me. My mom and dad would laugh when I would tell them I saw a "spooky" that day. I was more afraid of seeing something or someone in my house. I didn't recall ever seeing a ghost, but the attic had kind of given me pause for some reason.

I watched the door, but it didn't move again, so I turned over on my other side, preparing to start relaxation again. I quickly realized that wouldn't be possible; Seymour was back, he had moved the door, and he now sat quietly just looking out the window at the treehouse again. He turned his head and looked at me with a very quiet whine.

I got out of bed and cautiously approached Seymour. I wasn't prepared to put my hand out yet. Although, something in the dog's eyes again told me he wouldn't attack me.

"Good boy, Seymour," I whispered. I knew he would be there the rest of the night.

I managed to avoid the creaking placing in the floor board and stairs again as I made my way outside. I stopped just long enough to text Erick. I knew he would be on his way.

I slipped out the door and made my way to the treehouse. I climbed in and saw that Sara had laid out the blankets and pillows. She hugged me as I laid down by her side. With the little light I had, and her quietness, I could tell she was tired.

Sara lay with her back toward me. I brushed her blonde hair away from her face. She looked at me with a tired smile. I could tell she needed to sleep, but I wanted to tell her something first.

"Sara?"

"Um-hum," she returned in a half-asleep voice.

"I just want you to know that the things Shelby says about me hurt me too. I fake being strong sometimes, but I shouldn't hide it from you."

She turned over and looked at me. "Thank you, Lilly. I sometimes feel like I'm just a weak person."

"I meant it when I told you how strong you were about all this. I haven't been through half of what you have, but every time she calls me 'Rainbow', it hurts."

My confession had more of positive response than I had even hoped for. I could tell by her voice and change in body language that she was angry. Anger helped us heal our pain if we used it in a constructive way.

"She's such an idiot! We have to find some way to let her know it!"

It appeared Sara had the same response I had; it was easier to feel anger when it was someone you cared about being hurt. I don't think we felt we deserved to feel angry for ourselves, because we were "stupid, weak or rainbow girl."
Chapter Fourteen

Erick's alarm went off the next morning at six o'clock. I woke up to find myself asleep on Erick's shoulder. My hand was resting on his chest. Sara and I were laying back to back. Erick reached down and brushed the hair out of my face and kissed the top of my head. Sara gave us a sleepy smile. We all eventually sat up and looked at the somewhat lighter morning sky. It was the time of year that the days were getting shorter.

"I wish we could stay here," she said and yawned.

"Me too," I said, catching her contagious yawn.

"Well, we always seem to return here at some time or another." Erick yawned as he began folding one of the quilts.

"I was looking at the treehouse last night, and I realized the tree is so big we could make the treehouse bigger if we wanted to."

Sara and Erick looked around before looking at me. Erick slowly smiled followed by Sara.

"We could make the floor and ceiling bigger," Sara said as she looked above her.

"And we could enclose it on all sides and make sure it's more structurally sound," Erick was pushing on the walls to see if they were solid. "The ceiling could be raised as well."

"Do you think your parents would mind?" Sara asked.

"Heck, no! My mom and dad have always liked doing projects. Our only problem will be keeping my mom out of it and from finishing it in one day."

They both had witnessed my mom in action, so they had no trouble visualizing my mom at work. They both laughed as we finished folding the bedding. Erick began climbing down from the treehouse. He had told us he wanted to be standing at the bottom unless one of us slipped and he could catch us. What kind of teenage boy insists on being there to catch you if you fall?

When Erick reached the ground, I heard him make a surprised noise. I looked over the edge to see Seymour standing next to Erick, and Erick had a wary look on his face. He knew my dad was rehabilitating him, so he stood still before looking up to watch me descend. I climbed down quickly. I wasn't sure what to expect from Seymour when other people were around.

"Hi Seymour," I said quietly. I always felt if I kept my voice low, he would seem less threatened.

He looked at me and Erick and back up to the top of the treehouse. I decided to try to get him indoors before he did something unpredictable. I walked away from the tree and called his name, patting my leg in attempt to get him to come to me. He didn't move. He took note of me, but then ignored me again as he looked back up at the treehouse. Erick watched him with a puzzled look on his face.

"Uh Sara, come on down," Erick called softly.

Sara immediately climbed down from the treehouse. I froze as I saw Seymour move towards her. He nudged at her hand, and she cautiously placed her hand on his head, petting it lightly. He backed off again and sat back down. Erick looked at me in concern.

"It's okay. You guys head home. I'll just go wake up my dad if I can't get him back inside." I said, knowing Seymour wouldn't attack me. I wasn't as sure about other people, so I wanted them to go.

Seymour was one of the largest pit bulls I had ever seen, and my dad had told me he could be very dangerous. We also had a mastiff, but the even bigger dog steered clear of Seymour when he was out. All of our animals steered clear of Seymour. He had never attacked any of them, but they seemed to sense he was dangerous.

"Are you sure, Lilly? Maybe we better wait while you go get your dad," Erick stated uneasily.

I watched as Seymour appeared to fixate on Erick now. He just sat and watched him. He probably had more of a fear of males, because it was probably a male who trained him to be mean and to fight.

"It's fine; he's never tried to hurt me."

I could tell Erick wanted to stay, but he reluctantly led Sara from the yard. Sara waved at me just before they left through the gate. I looked down at Seymour and he was watching me. When I moved towards the door, he followed me. After we were back inside, he took off trotting towards his kennel. I grinned as I went upstairs to get ready for school.

When I came back downstairs, my parents were sitting at the table drinking coffee, eating cereal and reading the paper. My mom had sat me out a bowl and spoon, but I wasn't hungry. I grabbed a banana and put it my bag.

"Hey, dad, you know how Erick's dad is a construction contractor? Do you mind if we work on the treehouse and make it bigger?"

"Oh, that sounds like fun," my mom immediately responded.

"I don't mind as long as you're careful. The tree's so large you shouldn't have any trouble making it bigger. I take it Erick knows something about building?"

"Yeah, he's worked with his dad for a long time."

"Shouldn't be a problem. Let me know if you need materials. We could start renting it out in the summer. If it proves successful, we could buy large trees all over the state and start a franchise – 'Callahan's Tree Top Hideaway'."

I rolled my eyes. "Dad!"

"Are you going to talk to Sara today about me talking to her dad?" My mom's tone was casual, but I knew she expected me to do so as soon as possible.

"Yeah, I will. I just hope she doesn't hate me," I said with concern.

"We're not going to do anything that will force her into something," my dad said as he winked at me over the top of his newspaper. "You kids let me know when you're going to be working on the treehouse."

I shook my head as I waved a good-bye. When I left the house, I heard my dad singing, "Come hide away, come hide away with me..." He wasn't above changing the words of the song to fit the circumstances. In fact, he often managed to gleefully butcher about every song he sang.

Erick was waiting at our meeting place before school. It was still a little early and Sara hadn't arrived yet. I picked up the pace when I saw him. This would give me an opportunity to talk to Erick about what my parents and I talked about before telling Sara. I wanted to know if he thought she would be upset.

Erick listened intently as I told him, and began shaking his head no when I expressed my worry over upsetting Sara.

"I don't think she'll be upset if your mom wants to talk to her dad, but I'm not sure she'll want to do the home schooling thing. I mean it's just an idea and she told us we could talk to people we trust, but we're her only source of support."

Erick had a frown on his face as he considered what I had told him. I spotted Sara coming down the street so I began hopping up and down and waving my arms as though she was going to be surprised to see us. He put his hand on my shoulder to return my attention to him before Sara caught up.

"I don't think I would tell her about talking to Eva though," he said in a low tone.

"Why not?"

"Well, um...I don't think I would want to tell someone personal stuff, and then find out afterwards that the person had been going and talking to your friends about it." He seemed to be thinking about how to phrase his explanation so I could see it from Sara's point of view. It was hard to disagree with when you looked at it from that angle.

"Okay, your right, let's not tell her yet," I agreed.

"Hey, tree friends!" Sara greeted us with a smile.

"Hey, that reminds me! Dad said he doesn't care if we work on the treehouse as long as we're safe," I told them.

Erick laughed. "I always love it when parents say something like that. I don't know about you two, but I was planning on being as careless as possible."

"Me too," Sara and I said in unison and laughed.

"Yeah, you would think by now they would know we have a little common sense," I said. "Like – be careful when you walk to school, and I want to say, 'No, I'm going to walk straight down the highway'."

"You better where your coat," Sara played along, "No, it's two degrees out and I insist on wearing shorts and flip-flops."

We began taking turns saying irrational things our parents and other adults said to us, and then making up outlandish come backs. Before long we were at school, and I realized I hadn't talked to Sara. I hit myself in the forehead as we left Sara at her first hour.

"Make sure you talk to Sara, Lilly," Erick was imitating my mom. "No, mom, I want to make fun of you instead."

I tried to hit him in the arm, but he was too fast and made it to his seat. We were laughing as we sat down, but suddenly I remembered Jacob was in this class. I discreetly looked at his chair but he wasn't in it. I began to say something to Erick, but I was interrupted by our first hour teacher.

"Lilly and Erick, the assistant principal wants to see you in his office." He tried to say it without drawing everyone else's attention, because it was fairly apparent we were in trouble.

After we left the classroom, I looked at Erick with unease. He just grabbed my hand and told me not to worry about it. One of the teachers yelled at us to not be touching, and Erick put a little distance between us while he wiggled his eyebrows. I was too worried to think it was funny.

We entered the office and were told to sit in the assistant principal's office. Everyone was looking at us in curiosity. I was mortified. I never got into serious trouble at school. I wondered if Erick had, because he didn't seem to be worried. Like my dad this morning, he winked at me in reassurance.

The assistant principal came in and closed his office door behind him. He made a production of getting to his seat behind his desk. I think it was an attempt to intimidate me and it was working.

"I don't know what you two were up to yesterday, but you better straighten it out right now," he said as he leaned back in his chair and looked at us. "Lilly, I know it must be fun to make two boys fight over you, but it can cause them some dire consequences. And Erick, you have a black belt in mixed martial arts, did you know you could be charged with assault with a deadly weapon? You may have cracked the Myer's boy's cheekbone! I'm waiting to get a call from a doctor. Do you two care to explain to me how you plan to justify yesterday's little incident?"

"Who have you been talking to?" Erick asked with a hint of defiance in his voice. I just swallowed a lump in my throat.

"That's confidential. You know we don't tolerate violence of any kind. I may just call the police once I hear from the doctor," he said in a dismissive tone. He pinned me with his eyes. "Was that enough of a fight for you, Miss Callahan?"

"That fight was not about me and..." I attempted to explain.

"Oh, wasn't it? Well, I have it on good authority that you tried to play Jacob and Erick against each other!"

"What? That's not true!" I said desperately.

The assistant principal leaned forward in his chair as he gave me a stern look. "Don't attempt to lie to me, young lady!"

"She's not lying!" Erick's voice was raised.

"If I have to talk to you separately, I will!" The assistant principal appeared to have already found us guilty, although, he had started the conversation in a manner that suggested he was trying to find out what had happened.

"That's fine, because our stories won't change!" Erick was openly defiant now.

"You do realize even if this hadn't happened on school property, I could still file a police report. I don't know what you were thinking! You have always been somewhat of a good role model among your peers..." He stopped suddenly when we heard a large ruckus going on outside the office. The door opened very abruptly.
Chapter Fifteen

It was Ms. Louis and the Coach. They entered the room and shut the door behind them.

"We would like to talk to you alone before you talk to the students," the coach requested in a respectful manner.

"I will talk to you later. I have all the information I need," the assistant principal stated with a note of finality. "Would you mind allowing me to do my job?"

"Kids, why don't you wait outside while we talk with the assistant principal," Ms. Louis suggested.

The assistant principal's face flushed with anger. "Stay right there!"

I felt my heart begin to race. I had never witnessed adults fighting like this before. They all looked equally intent on taking a stand, and I worried what this would mean for me and Erick.

"I witnessed the incident yesterday, and I haven't been questioned about it yet," the coach said as he folded his arms. "I have information you don't have."

"I would like to speak for Lilly. I've got to know her quite well since she began school here, and I can almost wager she had nothing to do with this," Ms. Louis's voice was calm and quiet.

The assistant principal looked like he was going to pop a blood vessel. He rose to his feet and planted his hands on the top of his desk. I slid down in my seat in dread. Erick looked at me in concern and reached out to briefly put his hand on mine.

"And I wager I have information you don't have! I just talked to Jacob's parents and they told me Jacob was viciously attacked over this girl!" He pointed to me.

"Oh, come on, Millhouse!" the coach said in irritation. "Both of the boys' actions can't be controlled by another person! I'm sure you didn't hear the entire truth." He looked at Erick. "You know this kid doesn't do things like that!"

"And Lilly is not an instigator!" Ms. Louis said. "I really think this conversation would be more appropriate if the kids go back to class." Again, she appeared to be the only one who was remaining calm or even attempting to remain calm.

"Well, I think if she can stir it up, she can stay and deal with the consequences! Maybe we can get Principal Ellington to join us!" The assistant principal was definitely threatening them, but I saw a look of triumph cross the coach's face.

"I think that's a brilliant idea!" The coach opened the door and asked the receptionist to call Principal Ellington.

Ms. Louis gave me an encouraging look as she placed her hand on my shoulder. She was my favorite person in the world at that moment; an adult openly standing up for me when I needed it the most.

It wasn't long until Principal Ellington arrived at the assistant principal's office. He raised an eyebrow as he quickly assessed who all was in the room. He motioned for the coach and Ms. Louis to take a seat. I expected him to request we leave, but he just pulled up a chair on the other side of us. He looked from the adults back to us.

"It looks like they're having an argument. Who do you think is winning?" the principal whispered loud enough for all the adults to hear.

Oh geez, he reminds me of my dad. I thought as I became aware I was almost holding my breath. Erick and I were both smart enough to not have an answer.

The assistant principal, Mr. Millhouse, began rattling off the story, and how the coach and Ms. Louis had interrupted him in an insubordinate manner. I was surprised when the other two adults said nothing. The principal braced his finger tips and thumbs together like a steeple. He suddenly looked very serious.

"I would have hoped you would bring something of this severity to my attention before taking action, Mr. Millhouse," he said in a manner that far exceeded Mr. Millhouse's attempt of intimidation. "That would have been protocol."

"I just talked to Jacob Myer's parents on the phone. Erick may have fractured his jaw-bone yesterday, and Erick has a black belt in mixed martial arts, and if you are unaware, that's assault with a deadly weapon," Millhouse said in outrage.

"Thank you, Mr. Millhouse, but I was aware," the principal returned. "In fact, I believe there to be much more to this story than you may be aware of at this time."

Mr. Millhouse looked between the three adults with a look of confusion. "I was just trying to follow protocol. You just reminded me, and on more than one occasion, have told me there are times you must just fall back on protocol because the correct thing to do may not be clear...so I have to admit, I don't understand. This is a clear case of assault."

The principal rose quickly to his feet in a brisk manner. He put his hands in his pockets as he wandered to the window, rocking slightly back forth from his toe to his heels. I thought he looked very much like a lawyer about to give his closing argument. I just didn't know what his argument was going to be. What does he know?

"Mr. Millhouse, I believe you have two daughters?" he asked while continuing to gaze out the window.

"And a son," he replied.

"I want you to think about your daughters, and I want you to keep their faces in mind as I tell you a little bit about what was behind Mr. Mchail's attack." I saw him turn to face Mr. Millhouse.

I saw Mr. Millhouse hold up his hands in a way that indicated he was going to give the principal the floor to talk. He sat back down in his chair and leaned back to face the principal. It didn't appear to me that he thought the principal could possibly say anything that would change his view of the situation. I looked at Erick in dread. He tried to give me a small reassuring smile.

"We aren't going to use any names here. I think we should allow this young lady her privacy, and her dad has demanded it. If this in any way leaves this room, the consequences will be dire."

I saw Mr. Millhouse look at me in question, but the principal shook his head. "Lilly, is not the young lady, but she knows something of the story. It was another young woman who is only an acquaintance of hers. Erick has known her for quite some time."

I realized the principal was trying to shelter Sara's privacy by giving a description that could possibly be any girl within the school. Erick had lived here all his life. I felt a sense of relief. I knew Sara would be upset by this exchange, but I also knew she would be the first to speak up if Erick was in danger of being in serious trouble.

"She had just turned 14, and like many young ladies in society today, she was insecure around her peers. Girls tend to put a lot of pressure on each other to be beautiful, thin, the best dressed, intelligent and very well liked. A lot of children who have a parent or parents with prestigious jobs or well positioned in the community, role model a behavior of being a slightly elevated in other's eyes. This young lady was not fully accepted by her peers. She thought of herself as being not quite good enough, so when a popular group of girls finally gave her some attention, she was more than happy to just be welcomed in their company. She is a sweet and naive girl, and doesn't think others would deliberately be deceitful. She shares her secrets with them, not knowing they would be used against her." The principal paused as he walked a few steps to lean against the wall.

"This is when I really need you to think of one your daughters, Mr. Millhouse. If I'm correct, you have a friendly relationship with the Myer's boy's parents?" I could tell he was asking one of those questions in which he already knew the answer and Mr. Millhouse realized it as well. He remained silent as he waited for the principal to continue.

"This 14-year-old had her first crush, and was so happy when her new popular best friends were going to help her talk to him. They invited her to have a sleep over where she was more or less led to believe they were accepting her into their group. It would give her the opportunity to meet the boy who had captured her attention. It was like a little girl's dream. Unfortunately, it didn't quite go like a fairy tale though, because those new friends belittled, degraded, and humiliated her. They pushed her around and stripped her of her clothing, before allowing her first crush to beat and rape her," he finished in a cold harsh tone.

The easy-going man who had reminded me of my dad was now an angry and deadly serious man. He remained silent as he looked at Mr. Millhouse for a moment, allowing what he told him to sink in. I felt Erick run his fingers across my face and realized tears were running down my cheeks.

"These are allegations, Mr. Millhouse, but do you know what Jacob Myers said to me when I asked him about this incident?" He didn't wait for a response. "He said Erick Mchail was jealous because he got to the girl first. Think of what you would want to do to a young man that was more than double the size of one of your daughters and had treated her in this manner."

Mr. Millhouse's face was shocked and pale. I kind of felt for him in the moment. It was a horrible story for anyone who had an ounce of compassion. He appeared to be even more effected, and I wondered if he indeed was thinking of his daughters. My parents had told me there were things or fears I would never understand until I had children of my own.

"Charges?" appeared to be the only thing he could even think to say at the moment. His face remained calm, but I could sense the horror behind his eyes.

"Yes, the dad did try, but he saw his daughter's character was going to be assassinated, and he couldn't bear to see her go through the legal system. Not only that, but the girl didn't report the crime right away and the boy's family managed to intimidate them. When she was pushed to give a report, she attempted to take her life and had to be hospitalized."

Mr. Millhouse interlaced his fingers and rested his forehead against them. I could tell we all had completely blindsided him. His sense of indignation was gone.

"I can admit that I would be very, very upset if this were to happen to one of my daughters, but a question lingers in my mind." Mr. Millhouse looked at Erick. "Violence is not the answer to violence, even if the person in question is someone we love."

"Agreed!" The principal shook his head to acknowledge his point, but then he looked at Mr. Millhouse when he didn't immediately continue. "What is your question?"

"I can't say with one hundred percent certainty what I would do if it was one of my daughters, but Mr. Mchail, what is your connection to the girl? I know there doesn't have to be a connection to see the tragedy of this situation, but why such a violent and impassioned response from you. Do you have an interest in this girl?"

Erick looked at the assistant principal, but I was surprised when he turned to me, reached out his hand to grab mine and mouthed the words "I'm sorry."

"She's my sister. We have the same dad. It was a fact that my parents and hers decided to keep silent. My father and her mother had an affair while they were still married. Her mom's husband knew it, but when Sara was born he developed a strong bond with the baby and wanted to raise the child as his own. He's a dad to her in every way that matters," Erick said with a hint of defensiveness. "I hope if you know the girl, you won't repeat this. She and her dad have been through enough."

I sat in absolute shock. Visions of Erick's protectiveness and affection for Sara ran through my mind. I thought, or had been led to believe, it was due to being close family friends. I remembered questioning the level of interest in the beginning, and wondering if Erick and Sara were romantically attracted to each other. I couldn't help but feel a little betrayed. Why didn't they tell me? I thought. I now can see how every action and every word between the three of us fell into place. I looked at Erick and he was pleading with me with his eyes. I felt a sudden need to be alone so I put my elbows on my legs and covered my face with my hands.

"I see." I heard the assistant principal say with an obvious feeling of discomfort.

My mind blocked out the voices around me. I thought about my first meeting with Sara. Sara's self-esteem was at an all-time low. It was unknown to me, but she had secrets and she felt shame. Not one secret but two. She appeared to be very close to Erick, and looking back now Erick appeared happy that Sara had a new friend. Their relationship had been misinterpreted before, but she knew the consequences of having any kind of relationship with Erick. Erick knew she felt shame about their parents, but he had no idea there was something else also out of her control causing her to feel such a deep level of shame. She had no control over her mom's actions, and no control over the rape and assault. And she honestly believed she was at risk of me not being her friend if I knew either one of her secrets, and Erick was just relieved that I appeared to want to be her friend.

I got to my feet without realizing it and walked towards the door. Something inside me told me I couldn't leave the room, but my mind was still putting memories together, which appeared to make sense now...and yet I still wondered. There was no doubt me and Sara were friends. I felt a bond there, but what about Erick? Did Erick really like me or did he just realize his sister really needed a friend? It wouldn't matter what was between Erick and me, Sara would still be my friend. Did Erick realize that or did he now knowing what happened feel the need to keep me close? Is that the reason he said we should put off having an intimate relationship? I wasn't ready for sex, but I had more than just friend feelings for Erick, but was he pretending to return those feelings, because Sara so desperately needed me right now? What would it do to her if she was present during this conversation? I had a sudden urge to escape to the treehouse to be alone.

I suddenly realized someone was saying my name. I turned around and looked at everyone in the room. They had just asked me something. I had to pull it together, because despite everything, what was going on right now was so much more important.

"Miss Callahan? Are you, all right?

It was the principal. He was looking at me in concern, I noticed everyone was looking at me in concern.

"Yes, I'm sorry. I know this is serious, but I really believe Erick was just reacting to someone he...loves being hurt. I am worried about what damage this could do to the girl if any of this were to get out. And I have no idea how to protect her from students in this school or Jacob Myer's parents."

I wasn't lying. I couldn't help it. I felt betrayed, but I didn't want Sara or Erick to be hurt in this situation.

"What should we do?" Mr. Millhouse asked, looking at everyone in the room. A hysterical laugh almost escaped from me. That did appear to be the question of the year. What did we do with all this information?

"I'm not entirely sure," the principal admitted. "I do know we owe it to this young lady to handle it in a way that doesn't cause her any more distress. For her sake, and others who may be going through something similar, we have got to try and get a handle on this bullying."

I spoke up again. "The school says it has a bulling policy, but it doesn't appear to be working. I don't think the parents should have to call and argue with school administration about protecting their kid from bullying. It happens in school and out of school, through text and the internet, and even some parents get involved supposedly to protect their children. I don't mean to be disrespectful, but what is in place is not working." They all looked at me and I felt as though I had just violated some unwritten rule – don't criticize the school.

"She's right," Ms. Louis admitted. "I see it happen a lot, and we have to find some way to empower these kids and their families."

"Well, first..." I began but then stopped, because it most definitely was another criticism of the school, so I stopped and shook my head.

"No, Lilly, please speak up! I have watched you struggle with students bullying you from the first day of school," Ms. Louis stated.

"I just don't think it's my place." I was aware Erick was looking at me. He could tell I was uncomfortable, but he was more upset because I had withdrawn from him. How did I know that? I thought.

"I would like to hear what you have to say as well, Lilly," the principal said.

"Well, I just don't think we can get kids and families on board until we can get...teachers...and administration to follow a bullying policy," I said, trying not to sound critical. "I know it must be a...complicated...problem."
Chapter Sixteen

"I don't understand what you mean, Miss Callahan?" The assistant principal was defensive. Almost all behavioral problems were handled directly by the assistant principal.

I was totally at a loss of how to approach this issue without causing offense. This was this man's job and his boss was standing in the room. I couldn't help it. I walked back over and sat by Erick. He shook his head at me in encouragement.

"I know it's a difficult problem and I'm not really sure how to explain it," I said, trying to get out of talking about the issue.

"I do," Erick said. He was deliberately trying to get the focus off of me. Even with my confused feelings, I felt grateful for the rescue.

"Well, then, tell us, Mr. Mchail," the assistant principal demanded.

"We try to handle the bullying ourselves..."

"Are you telling us you have been bullied?" the assistant principal interrupted.

"No, but I've seen many people bullied and..."

"Who?" the assistant principal was getting angry.

"Mr. Millhouse, no one is trying to place blame on any one person. Let the boy tell us what he knows. There's not one of us that hasn't been frustrated by a bullying situation," the principal said. This seemed to pacify the assistant principal. He sighed as he leaned back in his chair.

"I just wish the kids could learn to ignore it," the assistant principal mumbled. No one spoke up to agree with him.

"I think that's something much easier said than done," the coach said in irritation.

"Erick, could you please just tell us what you have seen?" The principal was not about to let the two men turn this into an argument.

"Kids try to ignore it. It's too hard. They try to fight back with words, but it just makes it worse. If they defend themselves from a physical attack, they get in as much trouble as the person that attacked them. Some of them finally give up and tell their parents, hoping they can just get it stopped. They don't care if the bullies find out, and call them a 'snitch' or worse, they just want it to stop. The parents get involved and they're told it will be dealt with, but it never is and I've seen kids just kind of shut down."

"Do you mean withdrawal?" Ms. Louis asked.

"Yes, they sometimes stop coming to school, or they avoid any interactions with anyone, which appears to make them feel worse. Others, start getting into a lot of trouble, and they end up with legal problems. I've also heard rumors of people trying to kill themselves," Erick stated. He was the bravest person I knew, because even his coach didn't seem to like what he said, but only the assistant principal disagreed.

"Many of these kids have parents that aren't good role models and we can't do anything about that," Mr. Millhouse said as he leaned forward in his seat. My dad had told me it was easy to blame someone else when things you're doing aren't working.

"Erick, Lilly, would you be willing to help if we try to implement some changes?" the principal asked.

Erick told them yes and I just shook my head. I wasn't sure if I would be able to lead other students, and the bullying would most likely get worse before getting better. Right now, it was just too much and I wanted to be alone, but I wouldn't get that chance until after school.

As my thoughts were racing, I could hear the principal warning Erick that despite everything there may still be dire consequences for his assault on Jacob Myers. I closed my eyes in dread, because it just further complicated all the emotions I was feeling. I don't know if it all our relationship had all been an act, but I didn't think I could bear Erick being in serious trouble.

The bell rang and we were finally able to leave the office. I took off running down the hall. I just couldn't talk to Erick right now. I had to think about all this.

"Lilly! Lilly! Lilly, please wait! Erick's voice almost sounded panicky. Maybe he thought I would tell Sara about everything that had just happened.

I stopped to allow him to catch up. I would just tell him he didn't have to worry. I didn't have any intention of causing Sara any more pain.

"Lilly, please, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to lie to you, but Sara has had a hard time dealing with the fact of what her mom did," he tried to explain.

I couldn't stand the worry in his green eyes. He really was a good person. He may even make friends with a girl who is a good friend to his sister or half-sister in order to keep her close, but he would make sure he was a true friend.

"Erick, I would never hurt Sara, so don't worry about it." I gave him a weak smile before turning to begin walking down the hall again. He fell into step beside me.

"No, you don't understand. I mean, yeah, I don't want Sara hurt, but I know you wouldn't do that. I'm worried I've hurt you and it's almost unbearable to me. Lilly, I love you," he said.

"You don't have to say that Erick. I have no intention of ever abandoning Sara," I said as I watched for her in the hallway.

"You don't understand. I don't care about Sara. I mean, of course, I care about Sara, but please don't abandon me. We're at the crossroad." I looked in his eyes and realized he really was panicking.

"What do you mean, Erick?" I asked him.

"There are some things I haven't told you. I just didn't want to freak you out," Erick said urgently.

I just looked at him in confusion. What is going on? I felt a sense of unease.

"Please, just let me explain. I know it's weird, but please just let me talk to you."

"We are talking, Erick. What is it?"

"I can't tell you now. I'll have to wait until after school. Please, just give a chance. We can go to the treehouse, and I can tell you and if you don't want anything to do with me, I'll leave you alone. I promise."

"You're kind of scaring me, Erick."

"No, no, I promise you will never have anything to fear from me. Please, just say you'll talk with me at the treehouse today," he pleaded.

"Okay, we go there most days anyway," I said, knowing I never had anything to fear from Erick – unless it was just getting hurt, because he really didn't like me in the way I liked him.

I could literally see the relief flow through Erick's body. His eyes lost that look of desperation and his muscles sagged with relief. He pulled me close to him and held me tightly. Everyone seemed to just part around us as they went both ways up and down the hall. Eva walked around the corner and stopped. When she saw us, she stood and smiled a moment before disappearing back around the corner. It briefly crossed my mind that I wanted to speak with her, but my mind went blank and I was content to just be held by Erick.

It wasn't until later in the day that I remembered why I wanted to talk to Eva. I sought her out between classes. She must have known about the incident in the assistant principal's office, because she wasn't surprised when I wanted to talk to her. She probably expected me to talk to her about it, but I was more concerned about my conversation with my parents about Sara.

"Eva, I talked to my parents about Sara."

"Yes, I had hoped you would. What did they say?"

"They want to talk to Sara's dad." It briefly ran through my mind my knowledge about her real parentage, but I could never talk even to Eva about that. "They think Sara should be taken out of the school environment for a while, because of what happened. They're hoping Sara's dad will agree to it, so she can get some treatment. What do you think? Is that any of our business?"

I was aware of Shelby and a group of girls stopping to look at us. "I told you she was crazy!" They laughed as they walked off down the hall.

"I believe sometimes it is helpful to get an objective opinion. I think her getting to spend more time at your house would benefit her a great deal. She needs some peace right now."

"That's pretty much what they were thinking."

"You are a very important person to Sara. She needs you on the rest of her journey." She placed her hand under my chin to lift my face, lightly kissing me on the forehead before leaving.

I watched her walk down the hallway. She would touch some students as she passed. It appeared to make them happy to have the attention, but not any of them said anything to her. I smiled when I thought about the comfort of Eva's touch, and wished the others would acknowledge their need for a counselor at times. It, in itself, would be of great benefit to those being bullied.

When we went to lunch, I looked for Sara to talk to her, but Erick told me her dad had picked her up for a doctor's appointment. He said she would probably come over to my house sometime after school. I tried to get Erick to share with me the things he wanted to talk to me about, but he said he really couldn't explain it all without showing me some things. I was becoming more confused all the time, and for the rest of the day, all I could think about was different things Erick may possibly tell me. I kind of knew I would be surprised, because surprises were becoming a common occurrence.

After school, Erick was quiet as we walked home. I tried to tease him and provoke a response from him, but he would just give his charismatic grin and wink at me. I could tell he was still worried about what he had to tell me, which made me feel more worried. I had already been shocked once that day, and I was so hoping he wasn't going to tell me something that would cause me to question his feelings for me more. I eventually became too tense to remain silent. I had to know.

"Erick, please just be honest with me. I would rather know and I can't promise I won't be disappointed, but I would hope we could remain friends," I said before quickly adding, "If you don't love me like you know I want you to, just tell me. I don't want you to try and carry on some facade, because you don't want to hurt me. I will love you for being honest for me."

Erick stopped in his tracks and looked at me in astonishment. For a moment, I thought he was surprised that I had guessed correctly. I began preparing a response in my head.

"Lilly, why would you think I would lie about something like that? In truth, the way I feel about you scares me a little and I'm terrified it's going to scare you." He grabbed my hand and began walking faster. I saw we were turning on the street where he lived instead of going to mine.

"Where are we going?"

"I have to get something from my house. It will only take a minute."

When we got to his house, he stopped and looked at me. We had never been to his house before, not on the inside anyway. He brought me up on the porch of the big brick house, but then he asked me to sit on the swing and wait for him. I leaned over and looked through his front door as he entered. I caught a glimpse of a cluttered living room. It hit me that I had never met Erick's mom before, and he really only talked about his dad. Erick came back out with a large bound book. It looked like an album of some kind.

It made me intensely curious, and he teased me with it all the way to my house. We went through my house, I called a hello to my mom and made for the kitchen. I got three bottles of water and three little packs of crackers, bologna and cheese. I wanted an extra in case Sara showed up, but knew the snack would be in danger of being devoured by Erick. Usually, I would have immediately discussed an incident like what had happened at school with my mom, but today I was willing to wait. I wanted to see what was in the dark red album.

We made our way to the treehouse in the back, and we both were excited to see my dad had brought some extra wood for enlarging the treehouse. I put the snacks and water in my school bag, but Erick grabbed the bag so I wouldn't have to climb with it. My mom had told me it was a little unusual Erick was always so chivalrous. She said that kind of behavior was more common from a time when she or my grandmother were younger and boys usually didn't do stuff like that anymore.

We were both settled in the treehouse before Erick held his album out. I waited in anticipation to see what was in it. He laid it across his lap, but seemed a little reluctant or nervous to show it to me. I couldn't even imagine what could be in it. I was holding tightly to a prayer in the back of mind of Erick really liking me...and not just for Sara's sake. I had worked hard to keep the fear behind my wall all day.

"Lilly, I really hope that what's in this album doesn't scare you. Sara said it probably would, and I should wait a while before I showed it to you. I just want you to know I'm not some kind of freak or something. Please, just tell me if it makes you uncomfortable and I will put it away and never talk about it again." He settled the album between us and opened it to the first page.
Chapter Seventeen

The first page was a beautifully colored pen and ink drawing of a large flower. The detail and colors against a darker background caught my breath. It was absolutely the most beautiful drawing I had ever seen. It finally hit me the flower was a white Lilly. I looked at Erick in wonder.

"Erick, it's beautiful. Did you draw that?" I asked in amazement. He gave a small nod of his head. "Why didn't you ever tell me you could draw like that? It looks like a painting."

"Lilly, you don't understand yet," he said with dread in his voice. He sighed before he slowly turned to the second page. It was a very detailed and beautiful picture of my house – not my house I lived in now, but the one I grew up in – the house in New Mexico. I stared at it in astonishment. It captured every detail from the car we had parked in the drive-way to flowers in the yard and the house number by the door. I gasped as I noticed one thing after another in the picture. It could have been a photo taken five or six years ago.

"Were you there? Did we know you back then? I don't remember," I asked with amazement. I doubt I could have remembered some of the details in the picture, but looking at it, I knew it was accurate.

Erick shook his head no with a shrug of his shoulders. He slowly turned the next page and it was a colorful drawing of my fifth birthday party. There were details in it I would have never remembered until I saw it in the drawing. I was becoming more confused by the moment.

"I don't understand. How?" I tried to think of a logical explanation, but as I continued to turn the pages there was drawing after drawing of me at different times in my life. I stopped when I came to a photo of me in the hallway of the school. I was wearing the clothes I had on today, and I had a hurt look on my face. I looked at Erick and realized he was watching my face.

"This is the last drawing I made," he said as he closed the album.

"Tell me what's going on, Erick. I don't know how this is possible." My life had just taken another fairly peculiar turn.

"Please, don't think I'm a freak," he whispered.

"Erick, I don't think you're a freak! I just don't know how this is possible."

"Remember when I told you that I was waiting to meet you after watching all your adventures in your backyard? Well, the real truth is, I have been waiting for you since I was eight years old. My dad says it's a gift that I have visions, but I was so scared it would scare you."

"Visions? You can see things that are going to happen – like premonitions?"

"Yes and no, because I can only see things about you. I have never had a vision of someone else."

"Why me?" I asked.

"I don't know, but when I was eight years old, I thought I was having visions of my make believe best friend, but as I got older, I realized I was seeing someone who may turn out to be special to me." He brushed my long dark hair back over my shoulder as he studied my face.

I felt like I was in a state of shock, but his touch seemed so comforting and familiar, and I had an urge for him to hold me, so I wouldn't feel so lost. I searched his eyes, trying to determine what this all meant, but his eyes were just filled with worry...and love. I gave in and leaned in as he wrapped his arms around me.

"I saw the look on your face today. You felt betrayed and I realized you thought we had purposely lied to you. I realized the reason I couldn't see past this day was because it may be the day you leave me. I don't think I could bear it. Please, believe me when I tell you we never meant to betray you or lie to you. Please, don't think of it like that, Lilly."

"Why didn't you guys tell me? You know I would have never told anyone."

"Well, we thought we would really let you get to know us before you found out some of the problems of our families. Sara thought you would think we weren't good people, and in truth, she really thought you would think I was really outright bonkers," he said with a small laugh. "Occasionally, I have seen some weird things, but it doesn't bother me anymore."

"I've heard of people who have psychic abilities, but I never have actually talked to one before. It doesn't bother me. I wish I could see into the future."

"It's not like that. I just have seen moments in your life. It stopped happening one day and I finally realized it was because you were here. Today was the last day I've seen anything. I didn't know what it meant until I saw the look on your face today."

I hugged him. "It's okay. Don't be afraid to tell me things. I don't judge people and I would never judge you or Sara. I feel like I've known you two all my life." I sat up quickly as a thought occurred to me. "Maybe it's like we've known each other in another life or something."

Erick laughed. "I just want to think about this life, but it's true; when I saw you on the first day of school, I thought 'she's finally here' but when you were even more beautiful in real life, I got so nervous I couldn't think of anything to say."

"I was pretty nervous..."

"Hey! You guys up there?"

It was Sara. For some reason, I was anxious to see her. I had doubted our friendship today, and now I wanted to talk to her. I hated she had thought I might think less of her because of her actual relationship to Erick.

"Yeah, come up, Sara," I called out. It only took a brief time for her small form to climb the ladder.

"What happened at school today?" she asked. "I heard people saying you two were called to the office, but dad picked me up for my appointment before I could talk to you."

"First, tell us what the doctor said." I wanted to know if the doctor had said something about her emaciated body. I couldn't get the vision of all her bones showing on her body out of my head.

"Well, he said I didn't have a healthy diet and I needed to see a nutritionist, and if I couldn't put on weight, he may want to hospitalize me for a while. I'm just not ever hungry, but I'm going to try, because I hate the hospital."

Finally, I had the opportunity I needed.

"Sara, I hope this doesn't upset you, but you know how worried I've been about you. I told my mom and dad what you have been going through, and they would like your permission to talk to your dad. They really like you, Sara. They want to help. They think you need out of the toxic environment at school for a while. They're hoping your dad will agree to home schooling for a while."

"They want to separate us?" she asked with hurt in her voice.

"No, actually, they want to ask your dad if you can spend more time over here. Maybe stay a couple days a week...share my room?"

"Really? They want us to spend more time together?" I could hear the excitement in her voice.

"I thought it was a good idea too, and you're here every night anyway, but..."

Erick put great emphasis on the "but", which made us look at him in surprise. "I don't know how your dad and my dad are going to feel about it." He paused. "Lilly, knows the truth Sara."

Sara's eyes darted to mine in apprehension. It appeared she was waiting for me to show some negative reaction. I reached out to squeeze her hand and smiled at her. It was like something heavy had been lifted off her shoulders and she sagged in relief.

"It was horrible, Lilly. They didn't tell us until I was about ten. My dad wasn't my dad, Erick's dad was. I couldn't believe my mom had done that, and then Erick's mom left his dad...my dad. I was so afraid they were going to take me away from the only dad I knew. My mom said Erick's dad had agreed to allow me to decide and he would try to not disrupt my life." She looked at Erick with an almost apologetic expression.

"Sara, dad wants you to visit again. I'm sorry, but he's having a really hard time since your mom died. You know that's the reason he moved so close. If he knew what I do, he would kill Jacob."

"And he would think dad isn't doing a good job of taking care of me. If mom hadn't been so selfish, nothing bad ever would have happened!"

"Sara, you know she's not responsible for any of this. I think it's very sad that she was so unhappy for so long." Erick's tone had become softer as he attempted to calm Sara down.

"She could have thought about me! When she died, she left me scared and alone!" Sara's voice was raising.

My mom had explained to me one time how grief can affect you. I had gone through a difficult time when my grandfather died in car accident when I was nine years old. She had never talked to me like I was a kid. She had said she believed God had a plan for everyone, and there had to be a reason God wanted my grandfather to come home. She told me everyone's home was where God lived.

It was strange how I remembered it, because although I was only nine, she had explained to me emotional stages people experience when they are grieving. First, there was a sense of denial, shock and numbness. It was like you know it happened, but there was some part of you that is detached from the reality, and it didn't really hit you the person you lost was gone forever. Then there was anger; anger at life, anger about the loss and even anger at the one who passed. 'What ifs' would be next; a constant questioning if something had been done differently, the loss may not have happened. Depression would be inevitable too and then finally acceptance. She had told me they don't happen one after another, because grief was so unique from any other type of feeling, and everyone handled it differently, but these stages were common. She had told me someone could be feeling a little of all the stages at any given time.

The memory of my own loss I knew would not compare to Sara's, but they did help me to understand her anger. She was angry at her mom for dying in the car accident. She needed her and it didn't matter that she couldn't control the accident. Erick put his hand on my arm when he saw I was about to speak. It appeared as though he wanted me to wait before saying anything.

"Lilly, sometimes I think I hate her. Shouldn't a mom love her child enough to be careful to stay with her? She didn't, Lilly!" I just looked at Erick. I knew I was missing something. I wasn't sure what to say, but thankfully he did.

"Sara, she did love you. I know that for a fact. She asked me to look out for you if something ever happened. Parents think about stuff like that. She knew my dad and your dad may fight, but she wanted me to keep you out of the middle of it," Erick's voice was again quiet.

"Really, Erick? Really?" There was a tear running down Sara's face. "She thought a half-brother could replace her? That's ridiculous! You know what else is ridiculous? Her actions destroyed both our families. Your mom left because my mother became involved with your dad, and she has the gall to ask you to do something for her?"

"Sara, my mom made the right decision. There was constant arguing and bitterness between them. She knew their fighting was hurting me. My dad didn't want her to break up our family, but she knew that it was better to come from a dysfunctional family than to live with one. She made the right decision. My dad is happier and she's happier and I love the peace. I have a better relationship with both of them. Your mom didn't cause them to break up. Believe me when I say they were unhappy long before the affair."

"Did you know my mom tried to blame my dad for it? She said he was cold to her and he acted like he didn't love her. That was a lie! My dad always tried to please my mom. He tried every day. I saw him. I was little but I could see him trying to please her, and she was the one who was cold and uncaring. Now I see it in his eyes; he's afraid I'm going to stop loving him too. When I'm hurt or sad, he feels so helpless and scared. I'm hurting him! I'm hurting him just like she did! I do stupid things and it hurts him!" Her voice cracked with emotion.

I looked at Erick and I could see the determination on his face to reach her. I felt completely out of my element, but I once again fell back on something my mom had told me – just being willing to listen and care is sometimes worth more than the wisest words in the world. I had to let her know I cared and would be willing to listen and try to understand.

"You think you are responsible for him feeling hurt? What do you think you do that hurts him?" I asked, hoping I was asking the right thing.

Sara looked at me, sighed and shook her head. "I try, but I can't be... not scared."

"Sara, you are not responsible for your dad being hurt. He's just worried about you. My dad says it's his job. It's every parent's job," Erick said. "And he's worried too. He wants to see you. You know it's why we moved to this side of town. He wants to be closer to you."

"See? I'm hurting him too. You know I care for him, Erick. He was always like a second dad to me even before my mom came out with the truth, but I can't help feeling like the mistake. I am the walking talking mistake that destroyed two families."

I watched the interaction between Sara and Erick, and I realized they looked a little alike. I had never noticed it before, but now that I knew the truth, it was easy to see. Erick's eyes were green and Sara's were blue, but they were shaped the same and they both had dark long lashes and high cheekbones. Sara had softer features, but even some of their expressions were similar and they had a lot of the same mannerisms. I shook my head to clear it when I noticed the devastation on Sara's face. She honestly believed she was responsible for all the hurt.

"Sara, I can see how you would think you are at the center of everyone's problems, but you were a baby. You didn't ask to be born. You had no control over anything. Two consenting adults had feelings for each other and you were the result. I know it caused problems, but you are so special. God doesn't make mistakes like that. He wants you here and I am so glad. You are my best friend. You are Erick's sister. I thank God for bringing you both into my life."

Sara wiped her tears before reaching over and hugging me. I wished I could take all the pain in her and absorb it into myself. I thought about what my dad had said about Sara when we were talking last night. He said she was like a small, wounded rabbit. I had to admit it was a fairly good analogy. It was like someone had broken her leg, and she was struggling to survive in an environment that was too harsh for her kind.

"Tell me about your mom, Sara. I can't believe she was such a bad person. It sounds like she made some mistakes, but I just know she loved you," I said without doubt.

"She wasn't a bad person. She just had some problems," Erick said, "and I really think a lot of them were out of her control. I know she suffered from depression. My dad has always said people need to start thinking about things like depression as a medical problem."

"My mom says the same thing," I said as I felt Sara lean back to sit down beside me.

"Your dad tried to get her to go to a doctor. I heard her talking about it one time, but she said nothing was wrong with her," Sara said. I could still hear the anger in her voice.

"There's still a lot of people who think things like depression are a choice or an excuse," I said and Erick quickly agreed with me.

"Do you think I'm depressed?" Sara asked.

"I don't know how you could not be, Sara." I had been wanting to approach this subject for some time and Erick looked ready to back me up. "Some of the worst depression can be brought on by a traumatic event."

"The doctor said I had post-traumatic stress syndrome, but dad thinks I'll work through it. I'm really trying. It's just at night it's really hard. I have really bad dreams."

"I know. I've seen you wake up gasping and sometimes you scream," I said, thinking about our nights in the treehouse.

"At home, it's worse and it wakes up my dad. He sits with me, but I hate seeing the worry on his face. He thinks the dreams are going away. He doesn't realize I'm not staying in my room at night. I just know if my mom was here, I would feel better, but she's dead."

"I bet she really would want to be here for you," I said, trying to break through some of her anger at her mom.

"No, Lilly, you don't understand. The car accident was no accident. She purposely drove her car right off the cliff. She made a choice to leave me."
Chapter Eighteen

I looked at Erick in shock. He shook his head to confirm what Sara had just told me. I felt like a bomb had been dropped.

"I'm so sorry," I said, "I'm just so sorry. I didn't know."

"Not very many people do, but there was a witness that came forward. The papers, out of respect for Sara's family, didn't print exactly what happened," Erick explained.

I could tell he was watching my face closely. He was worried how I would take another hidden secret. My brain acknowledged it, but all I could think was why? How much pain should a family have to go through?

"I can't even imagine the pain of losing one of my parents like that," I said, looking at Sara.

"The witness said that she was driving in front of them for about fifteen minutes when she pulled the car over." Sara told me. "The metal guard on the side of the road had been destroyed. They said they slowed down, after they passed her, because they were afraid she may be having car trouble. She backed the car up on the other side of the road, stopped and slammed down on the accelerator and the car flew off the edge."

"Was there any sign she was feeling that bad?" I asked.

"I think it was a sign when she sought me out that day to talk about watching over Sara," Erick was still trying to gauge my reaction. "I just didn't know it. I know now I should have said something, but there had been fighting, and I thought she was just worried about Sara."

"It's not either of your fault. And I think Sara has a right to be angry. Suicide is a very selfish act. She chose to leave her," I said with conviction. "You can't just fix your unhappiness by checking out. Especially, when you have a child."

"That's why I'm so angry. She didn't know what was going to happen to me, but a girl needs a mom. Maybe I wouldn't have made such a stupid decision."

"Sara, you have to talk to someone about all this. You're not to blame for any of this. Your mom couldn't have saved you, because she couldn't possibly have known what these kids are capable of, and you're in no way responsible for hurting anyone. We all just want to see you stop hurting," I said. I knew at that moment there was no way we alone could help her. I looked at Erick and he appeared to feel defeated as well.

"Do you know I saw Jacob's mom at the store and she called me a little whore?" she asked with a puzzled look on her face. "I didn't think adults did things like that. I don't think I led Jacob on."

"Oh, my god, Sara! That's ridiculous!" Erick was instantly angry again. "You need to tell Dad what happened!"

"No, Erick, you can't say anything! Please, don't! He'll take me away from my dad!"

I put my hand on Erick's arm. "We don't want to make this any harder, but you have suffered so much you need to talk to someone that really knows how to help."

I once again felt completely out of my element. I realized my parents would probably feel the same. I had this feeling that I was caught up in a bad dream or a very tragic movie. Someone had to help us or something bad was going to happen.

"Maybe Lilly's mom and dad should talk to your dad today. Her mom seems to know there should be some kind of action taken." Erick seemed to sense my unease.

"He may let me stay here some. He thinks I've been better since Lilly's moved here, and the three of us are spending so much time together. He even thought it was a good idea to work on the treehouse." Sara's moods changed rapidly at times. Her excitement was back and she seemed more animated.

"Do you think he would be open to home schooling for a while?" I asked, thinking about her encounter with Jacob's mom.

"I don't know, but it would be nice if I didn't have to be afraid every day. I think my dad would talk to your mom. I'll go talk to him now and tell him she's going to call him." Sara moved to the ladder and began to back down. "Do you think we can start on the treehouse tomorrow?"

"Yeah, let's do it," Erick said with a smile, "but Sara would you think about visiting with dad? He just wants a little time with you. Maybe you and Lilly could come over and we could order pizza."

"Would he agree to that?" Sara asked in doubt.

"Sara, he would agree to anything if he could just spend a little time with you," Erick responded.

"We could plan it on a Saturday after we work on the treehouse, if that would be okay with your dad," I said.

"He'll like that. I'll talk to him and see what Saturday he wants to do it. I'm not going to be surprised if he wants to do it this weekend," Erick said with a grin.

When Sara was gone, I crawled closer to Erick. "I'm so sorry, Erick. You were effected by all this too."

"Yeah, but nothing compared to what my sister did." His face looked puzzled. "Do you know this is the first day I have actually called her my sister? It really means something when I say it out loud. I didn't know it would do that."

"Words can be powerful," I agreed. "Are you really happier since your parents divorced?"

"Yeah, I am. I guess there's a part of me that will always want my parents back together, but they seem so much happier now and they've kind of become friends. It's kind of strange."

"I think it's great if they can do that, and if their happier, it has to be better than watching them hurt each other."

"We won't ever get divorced," he said in a matter of fact voice as he laced his fingers with mine.

I laughed. "We haven't even kissed and you're talking about divorce."

"You're right, I shouldn't be talking about it." He surprised me as he leaned in and slowly kissed me. I was surprised when I felt a tingle travel through my body.

"Now, we won't ever get divorced!" he whispered, his lips still close to mine.

I was reeling inside and my heart was beating so fast I thought it was going to jump out of my chest. It didn't feel awkward though, it felt very natural. I rested my head on his shoulder.

"Do you think we should marry right away?" I asked with a grin.

"Oh, no, we can't possibly get married so young. Let's wait until your sophomore year."

"Okay, I guess that will give us time to plan the wedding and find a house."

"Do you think Boozer would be my best man?"

"I don't think we can trust him around the champagne fountain."

"True, he'll be drunk before the wedding even starts. Maybe we can use him for a ring bearer," Erick suggested.

"That depends; I would really like an engagement ring that has a sucker on the top, but I don't think he can be trusted with that either."

"Ooh, I like that!" Erick said with a laugh. "Do you think it would be too nontraditional for me to wear an engagement ring too?"

"Nah, let's break all the rules!"

"Oh, we're going to be perfect for each other!"

"Absolutely!" I said with enthusiasm. "Let's not rush into having kids right away though. I think we should have some time to ourselves before I start having babies."

"That's a good point! Let's wait to your junior year."

"Yes, it will give us an entire year to ourselves. You know I just realized that we all three have been raised as only children. How many children do you want?"

"Let's have two girls and two boys, so they can entertain themselves while we do our homework," Erick said while holding up four fingers up.

"It really would be convenient if we could have two sets of identical twins."

"I will start college classes at the community college. I think they have a daycare on site, and I think it's important for you to finish high school, so you can start college classes after the second set of twins are born."

"Yes, I would like to be a veterinarian like my dad."

"And I would like to go to medical school, so there will be two doctors in the family. We should be able to support four kids on our combined incomes. One of us may want to stay home with the kids until the kids are ready for school."

"You wouldn't mind supporting us until then?"

"Absolutely not! I'm going to be a brain surgeon or discover the cure for cancer in a couple of years, so we'll have plenty of money."

"Ah!" I now held up my finger "I think Sara should live with us until she decides what she wants to do. And if it turns out to be easier, I'd be more than happy to be the sole provider of all seven of us."

Erick smiled at me with his charismatic smile that revealed dimples on each side of his face. I realized I was constantly watching for that smile.

"I would like that too. I want to watch over her and make sure no one hurts her again." His dimples disappeared as he was brought back to the reality of the situation.

"I know. I don't know if she'll ever feel safe again."

We were quiet as we thought about Sara. I knew how I dreaded seeing Shelby and her friends or waiting to see what she was going to post online. It had to be twice as bad for her. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have Erick.

"Erick, I think we need to be serious and talk about reality. We need to get to work on this treehouse because we won't be able to buy a house right away. All seven of us will have to live in it until we graduate from college and get a job."

Erick laughed and hugged me. "You're right." He looked up at the roof of the treehouse. "We need to raise the ceiling and add a second floor."

"Erick, did your dad know from the beginning that Sara was his?"

"Yeah, he did, but Sara's mom didn't confirm it until she was about two years old. It's been hard on him to watch another man raise his daughter, but he knew it would hurt Sara to take her from her mom and the man she thought was her real dad. Her dad knew from the beginning that she wasn't his either, but he didn't care. He really loves her and would do anything for her. He seems strict but he's just overprotective. My dad just wants her to be happy, but I can see how much he wants to be with her."

"I love my dad so much I don't know what I would do if someone told me he wasn't my real dad, but then I also know my dad and if someone told him he had another child, it would kill him if he couldn't be with her or him. Whatever way you look at it, three people are hurt in some manner by what happened," I said as I looked at him. "I can't even imagine how it affected you too."

"It's hard sometimes, but I know it's not Sara's fault. As I get older, it's easier to understand how adults can make mistakes as well."

"Yeah, I've seen some of those mistakes with a few of the teachers at school. I was shocked at how some of them have handled the bullying at school," I said.

"It's true, I know," Erick responded. "And parents participating in it too!"

"I can't believe Jacob's mom treated Sara like she did! It's unbelievable! I can't imagine my parents doing that to a fifteen-year-old!"

"It's like those parents who have kids who play sports and they get so carried away, they end up physically fighting a coach or another player's parent."

"Yes! They forget it's just a game or they act like their kid can do no wrong and get involved in kid's arguments, taking sides," I said as I held my hands up in disbelief. "It's like I want to tell on Jacob's mom, but who do I tell? She an adult!"

"I wish Sara would tell someone besides us. That has to be harassment or something she could legally get in trouble over. My dad would probably lose it if he knew what Jacob's mom did! He would confront her."

"Mine too, but I'd like to think they would handle it a little more maturely."

"They probably would, but my dad said one time that it's a whole new level of anger when someone hurts your child," Erick said as he shook his head.

"Has your dad ever been tempted to take Sara from her dad after her mom died?" I asked.

A look of what appeared to be sadness crossed Erick's face. "I heard him talking to Sara's dad one time. He said he very much wanted to raise her, but after her mom died, he didn't want to risk putting her through anymore grief. He wanted it to be Sara's decision."

"Your dad is a good man. Sara is lucky to have two dads who care about her."

"I was just glad that some of my dad's mom, my grandmother, didn't pass on to Sara some of the traits I've struggled to handle."

"What do you mean?"

There was a loud horn from a car that ripped through the air. I jumped at the sudden loud noise. Erick and I looked at each other and moved to quickly descend the treehouse ladder. We ran to the gate and threw it open so we could see who was laying on their horn.

There wasn't a car in front of the house, but I saw Shelby's little red mustang make a quick turn down the street. I looked in confusion at the large volume of papers scattered through our front yard. I ran to pick one up and sighed in frustration. It was a picture of me in shade of red and the word 'Rainbow' in large letters centered at the top. The rest of the pictures were of me as well. They were in every shade of the rainbow. I noticed a few had me at varying shades of dark skin. At the top of those picture were the word 'fifty shades of brown'. I couldn't help it. The stress of the day and now this reduced me to tears. I knew these would be distributed throughout the whole school tomorrow. Evidently, Shelby realized I had completely stopped using social media.

"What a bitch!" I heard Erick say in anger. I was too tired to be angry.

"Let's pick them all up. I don't want neighbors getting a hold of any of them."

He looked around him as he groaned in continued anger.

"Lilly, maybe we should leave them. It's definitely legal harassment and they're just making themselves look extremely stupid!"

"I know, but it's like we said earlier. It will just upset my parents."

"It just makes me hate them! It always makes me feel completely helpless. I am so fed up with this bullshit and I just want to strike back again!" Erick's anger appeared to be growing, but after our past experience with his anger, I wanted to make sure he didn't do anything.

"Erick, please don't do anything. It will probably just make things worse," I pleaded as I turned to look how far the flyers had been thrown.

He struggled for a few moments as he fought to control his temper. I watched the feelings play out across his face. I knew he wanted to go after them, but fortunately he took a deep breath and got his emotions under control.

"Erick?" I whispered.

"What is it?" he asked as he placed his hands on my arms and turned me to face him.

"This was out of anger; a response to what we told the principal. What are they going to do to Sara?"

I saw the confirmation on his face and just dropped the papers I had been holding, and took off running. I could hear Erick running behind me. He was faster than I was. Why wasn't he passing me?

"Lilly, slow down, you're going to fall and hurt yourself!"

My scrapped hands and knee ran through my mind, but I just tried to increase my speed. Erick wasn't going to pass me to get to her sooner, so I tried to run even faster. We had to get to Sara. Saving Sara had created a pattern of us trying to outrun the damage.
Chapter Nineteen

It seemed like it took forever, but we finally reached Sara's house. I could hear Sara's dad talking to her as we reached the front door. I raised my hand to knock and froze.

"Sara, honey, how could they possibly know?" Mr. Townsend's voice was raised but it didn't sound like his anger was directed at Sara.

"I don't know, dad. I was just talking to Lilly and Erick about it, but I didn't tell anyone at school," Sara voice was slightly shaken.

I closed my eyes in dread. This was our fault. The look on Erick's face told me he understood what was happening as well. I knocked on the door. We had to face this.

Mr. Townsend answered the door, and he smiled at us warmly and invited us in despite the circumstances. Erick and I entered the house like we were walking to our execution. Sara looked at us in surprise.

"I'm sorry," Erick began, "it just kind of came out today at school when we were called to the principal's office. I hit Jacob the other day and they thought it was about Lilly."

"I see," Mr. Townsend said. "Does your dad know?"

"No, he's won't be home to around six. I was going to talk to him then."

Mr. Townsend sighed like someone who was thoroughly exhausted. I felt so bad for him that I tentatively took a step towards him. I wasn't sure what I was going to do, but I felt a need to reach out to him.

"Well, we knew it couldn't remain a secret forever." He shook his head before reaching up to run his hand over his face.

"Erick only told his coach, but he told the principal and he told the assistant principal, because Erick was going to be in serious trouble for hitting Jacob." I summed it up as quickly as I could.

"I wouldn't want Erick getting into trouble for something I very much wanted to do myself." He turned away as tears gathered in his eyes. "I tried so hard to shelter her from bad things, but I just succeeded in making her too trusting."

"Will they try to take me away from you?" Sara's voice was shaking.

"No! My dad wouldn't allow that to happen," Erick spoke up to assure her.

"We were going to let Sara tell you, but something happened and I'm afraid the information got out," I said.

"What do you mean? I thought you only talked to the administration," Sara's dad said with a look of confusion on his face.

"Well, the kids at school who always give us problems. They usually target both of us as the same time, and they did something to me today," I explained.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry. What did they do?"

I looked at Erick for help. I didn't want to tell him for some reason. I was embarrassed...and I hadn't done anything. I watched as Erick pulled some half-folded sheets of paper out of his jacket. Evidently, he had kept some of them.

Mr. Townsend looked at me as he took the sheets of paper from Erick. I saw his look of confusion turn to anger. He had the look of an adult who was biting his tongue to keep from cursing. Sara walked over and took the papers from him.

"Dad! How can they get away with this?" Sara asked with disbelief.

"Have your parents seen these?" Mr. Townsend asked.

"I'm sure they will soon, they threw lots of copies out of the window in our yard and the yards around us."

"So, you came running here, because you were afraid they would do something to Sara too?"

"Yes, I was afraid of what they may know."

He shook his head in understanding. "Sara just told me your parents wanted to talk to me. Why don't we go and talk to them right now?"

For some reason, I felt a sense of relief as we got in the car to go back to my house. Mr. Townsend was upset, but he made me feel like we didn't have to handle this alone anymore. I was surprised when he asked Erick to call his dad and see if he could possibly join us at my house. I don't think I had ever respected an adult so much until the moment he asked Erick to call his father. I could see why Sara loved him so much. He really wanted to put Sara first despite his own feelings. It also made more sense as to why Erick's dad was agreeable to allow him to raise Sara. I knew my parents would like him and it was a valuable lesson to me. I had really misjudged him.

When we got to my house, we waited until Erick's dad arrived. As we waited, all five of us went outside and gathered all the papers that had been thrown from Shelby's car. I noticed some of the neighbors watching us, and I hoped they hadn't seen any of them. Sara's dad said Shelby's flyers would upset most adults, so we decided to hold on to them.

When Erick's dad arrived, we had to tell him everything that had happened. I thought he may explode with anger. I saw him move towards Sara at one point and realized he wanted to hug and hold her, but the complex situation seemed to tell him that his comforting may not be welcomed. I saw the intense pain in his eyes and felt sorry for him. The situation made it awkward to treat Sara like a daughter.

I again felt a sense of relief when the adults told us we could go to the treehouse and let them talk. The three of us almost ran over each other trying to get out the back door. I saw Erick dart back in the door. He had a pencil in his hand when he came out. He had been there enough to know we kept pens and pencils next to our kitchen phone.

It wasn't until we were settled in the treehouse that Erick took one of the crumbled flyers out of his pocket and began drawing lines on the back of it. Sara and I looked at each other in question as we watched him draw.

"What are you doing, Erick?" I asked with a laugh. I realized Erick's was trying to draw straight lines and they were almost diagonal on the page.

"We need to get our minds off all this stuff, so I'm drawing our blueprints. We have to all be happy with it, because we'll probably be living here for the next ten years."

"What?" Sara's look of confusion was almost comical.

"Well, Erick has asked me to marry him, but we realize we're a little young, so we're going to wait a whole year. And, obviously, it's too soon to start having babies so we're going to wait until my junior year. Since we're both in school, we're going to have to live in the treehouse until we can afford to buy a real house, and the children are going to need their aunt Sara, so we're building on a second story so we have room for everyone. Just don't tell anyone, because our parents will probably be anxious for us to start having those grandbabies. So, are you in? You know we can't live here without you."

Sara's eyes lit up her whole face. "Absolutely! I can even get a part-time job and do all the grocery shopping," she said with a laugh.

I looked at Erick's blueprint and realized the house looked like it would be bigger than the one I lived in. I watched as Sara reached over and drew a line hanging from the large thick branch that extended out from the treehouse.

"We need to put a rope here so we can raise things up in a bucket." She drew a little bucket at the end of the rope.

"Oh, that's a clever idea and we can use it as our fire escape," Erick said so seriously that we all laughed.

"Sara?" It was Erick's dad standing at the base of the tree. Sara looked a little apprehensive so Erick reached over and gave her an encouraging pat on her back. She crawled forward and looked down at Erick's dad.

"Are you mad?" she asked.

"No, honey, no, not at you. I just had something I wanted to show you. Would you come down for a few minutes? I promise it won't take long."

Sara backed off the edge of the treehouse and began descending the ladder. I felt my eyes widen as I looked at Erick. I motioned to us and the house to ask him if we should leave them alone. He shook his head no. We sat in silence as we heard Erick's dad began to talk.

"I have something I want to show you, but first I want to say that I'm so sorry I wasn't there to protect you from what happened. I know your dad feels the same way. You are so beautiful and smart and brave and you make us both so proud."

I felt tears forming in my eyes as Erick's dad opened up to Sara. I felt like I was an intruder on what was a very private conversation between a father and daughter. I looked at Erick and he just put his arm around me and whispered it was okay.

"Erick has told me for some time that you have worried I would take you away from your dad. I wanted you to see this paper I had my attorney draw up. I'm relinquishing all my parental rights to your dad. I don't want you to ever worry about that again. No one is going to take you from your dad, but I wanted to tell you that I love you very much. I always have," he said.

I heard his voice break with emotion and the tears involuntarily began pouring down my face. My parents had told me one time the love a parent has for a child is the strongest bond that exists. The look on Erick's face was painful.

"I remember," Sara said in a quiet tone. "I was six and I wrecked my bike. I was crying and I was all alone, but then you were there. You picked me up and held me before you carried me inside and cleaned my knee and put a band aid on it. It was just a little scrap I think, but you gave me ice cream and told me how all famous bike riders wreck their bikes too. Erick came home and you called my mom and asked if I could stay at your house for a while. She was yelling at you. I could hear it through the phone, but you were still really nice to her, and I wondered why she was so mean to someone who was so nice. You also took me and Erick to a movie and my mom didn't like it. My dad is the one who said you could take me and Erick to a movie anytime. I didn't know what I was feeling at the time, but now I know I was feeling...wanted."

"I remember too, honey. You were such a sweet little girl and you have always been special, so please don't worry anymore. This piece of paper says I can never take you from your dad no matter what. No one can."

"Every time I came over to play with Erick, you always did something nice for me. I don't mean to hurt you," Sara said just loud enough that I could barely hear her.

"I know that. I've always known that. Your mom and I made a mistake, but you...you were a gift from God, so I wanted to give this to you. It belonged to my mom and her mom gave it to her. It belongs to you if you want it."

"It's beautiful, thank you. I will always keep it and if I have a little girl someday, I will give it to her," Sara said. I could tell she was crying.

"I would like that. I also have a trust fund set up for you, but I'll let your dad tell you about all that. I know you're not ready, but I want you to know I will always be here for you. You may not want me to be right now or even later, and that's okay, but just know that I love you very much and that will never change. No matter what happens, I'll be here if you ever need me."

"Thank you for understanding. My dad told me once that you were an honorable man, and I didn't understand that because of what happened between my mom and you, but I understand it now. I will talk to him and see if he minds me visiting you."

I felt Erick sigh beside me and I realized it had to be hard for him to watch his dad go through this. He didn't have any feelings of resentment at all. It allowed me to see he was honorable too. He truly wanted his dad and Sara to have a relationship.

I heard his dad saying goodbye to Sara, so I began wiping my face, trying to erase any sign of my crying. Without thinking, I reached over and wiped Erick's face as well. I could feel a little dampness around his eyes. I quickly hugged him and he hung on to me for a few seconds. We both began examining his blueprint as we heard Sara climbing the ladder.

"Did you hear any of that?" Sara asked as she crawled over to sit beside us. I still felt emotional so I didn't know what to say.

"We heard everything. You can always trust him, Sara," Erick said. There was still some emotion left in his voice.

"I know. I mean I guess I've always known, but my mom used to tell me that I had to be happy because he may decide to take her to court."

"That was wrong," I said immediately without thought.

"Yes, it was," Erick agreed.

"I didn't mean it to come out so abruptly like that, but it's probably the reason you've always worried about it, and there's no way that man would do anything to hurt you." I was trying to reassure her, but I, in fact, felt a little angry with her mom for telling her something like that.

"Yeah, in the last couple of years I have sort of come to the conclusion she was wrong about a lot of things. I don't even know if she cared that she was scaring me. I think she was manipulating me and using me against both of them. I don't think she was ever happy," Sara said. Her head was cocked to the side as though she was thinking about some of the memories she had of her mom.

"I agree with you," Erick said. "I don't think she was well up here," Erick was tapping his temple with his finger, "so I don't know if we can really blame her. She didn't really have control of it."

Sara agreed by nodding her head. She opened her hand and dangled a beautiful gold locket on a chain from her fingertips. There was beautiful etched rose on the outside of it and it looked like it was made of real gold. I caught the end of it and examined it more closely. I could tell it was old. I wondered how many generations it had been passed down.

"Open it, Sara," Erick said as he examined it more closely.

Sara used the nail of her thumb to carefully open the locket. She gasped as she looked at the inside of it. I leaned over and looked and immediately gasped too. The inside was two very old pictures of a young woman and a man. The woman looked almost identical to Sara.

"I don't know who that is," Erick said after a long moment of looking at it. "It's not my grandmother. I've seen a picture of her around that age and she didn't look anything like that. She looked more like my dad."

"Maybe it's your great grandmother," I said, wondering why he had such an odd look on his face.

Sara noticed it too, because she was watching Erick's face and not looking at the locket. We looked at each other and Sara gave a slight shrug of her shoulder. I reached out and touched Erick on the shoulder. It was like he was lost in thought and not aware we were still sitting there.

"Erick, is something wrong?" I asked with my hand still lying on his shoulder.

He shook his head as though clearing it. It was beginning to get dark outside, so I had to lean in to look at him. He looked first at me and then at Sara.

"I will ask my dad. Surely, he knows who it is."

"It doesn't matter. I love it and it means a lot that he gave it so me. It's like he had my dad sign those papers, and I should be really happy, but for some reason I wish he hadn't. It's strange how whenever you get what you want, you suddenly wonder if you really want it."

"Yeah, I think humans have a habit of wanting something really bad and then when they get it, they get all these doubts about having it," I said with a small laugh.

"Yup, but I do know there is something I really want," Erick said with a smile. "I want to remember a long time from now all the times we spent together and all the things we shared with each other, so I really want a bigger treehouse!"
Chapter Twenty

The next months went by with very little drama. It was probably the most enjoyable days of my adolescence. Erick, Sara, and I worked on the treehouse with the occasional assistance of all our dads and, of course, my mom. They all had to wrestle with Boozer for tools.

All the preparations for Sara to be homeschooled seemed to be taking a while, so we continued our routine at school. After school, we would rush home and work for the last few hours of daylight before we would congregate at one of our homes, eat dinner, and do our homework. We talked and laughed a lot, enjoying our time together. Sara's light was slowly returning and she began to feel stronger. She never talked about it, but I knew she was spending longer periods of time with Eva at school. I would watch as Eva seemed to follow her through the school almost every day. I knew Eva had learned the truth and was being very careful to protect her from other students. I talked to her one day and she told me no one had shared the secret of Sara's parentage, but she wanted to be close in case we needed her.

Shelby continued to give us trouble on some days, but she was losing her enthusiasm because we refused to let her see she was bothering us. She had taken the flyers she had made of me to school, but Ms. Louis had them removed almost as fast as they were being put up. I knew she also was talking to Shelby, but she was doing it in a way that didn't bring Shelby's attention back to me. I wished every school could be filled with Ms. Louis's.

Sara was still showing up at my house at night. Seymour would wake me up to let me know she was there, and he would usually be waiting at the bottom of the ladder in the morning. I knew the exact day that all our parents finally discovered it, because when we got to my house, all four of them were working frantically to seal our now raised ceiling and securing the walls, so there would be no way for rain or snow or even wind to get inside the treehouse. Everyone backed off when my mom worked on our second ceiling. Tiles, wood and nails were being rapidly secured while spare nails and bits of tile flew in every direction. Erick, Sara, and I all were doubled over in laughter as we watched the astonishment on their dad's faces. Erick was recording with his iPhone.

When we got into the treehouse later, we found three very thick sleeping bags with pillows. They reminded me of something people may use if they decided to go camping on Mount Everest. There also was a large rechargeable flashlight. Sara was excited when she realized the rope from the attic had been tied to the large tree branch. It had a bucket tied to the end of it, but we found it was more fun to swing back and forth on the rope. It was obvious they had discovered Erick's blueprints we had slid between the boards of the treehouse.

The treehouse seemed even more magical than it had been before. It felt like we were in a far-off place hidden far from the eyes of people. We even had a little door in which we could close ourselves away from the real world. Our top floor provided us with a storage place for anything we wanted to store out there. We laughed when we talked about storing the sets of twins up there.

When everything was finally in place for Sara to be homeschooled, she asked her dad to delay the start date, because there was very little bullying going on at the time. Every now and then, I would catch her in an unguarded moment, and she would have that haunted look on her face. I knew she was having one of her harder days when that happened, but I didn't know how to approach it, so I would just try to make her laugh or ask her if she wanted to talk. She usually didn't.

During our Christmas break, unexpectedly Sara had a really difficult day. She asked Erick to ask his dad if he could borrow his truck so we could go riding around for a little while. It was a chilly day so I thought Sara wanted to ride instead of walk. We ended up going to a fast food restaurant and having a bowl of chili. Erick and I were talking a lot as we tried to get Sara to talk or laugh. She took us by surprise when she asked to go to the place her mom had driven through the guard rail and over the edge of the large hill.

Erick hesitated before agreeing to do it. I wasn't sure what to do, but I thought about it, and wondered if I wouldn't want to see the exact place where my parent had committed suicide. She must have always wondered exactly where it had happened.

Erick drove us to the road. It was actually the highest elevation in Missouri. It was called Taum Sauk Mountain. He told us he had done some research on it one time and found the mountain was named after a Piankeshaw chief named Sauk-Ton-Qua. It wasn't a mountain to compare to one you may find in the Rocky Mountains, but it was a beautiful wilderness of trees.

We looked on the edge of the road as we ascended the mountain, but we couldn't find any sign of a broken guard rail. Erick said that it would be unlikely we would find something because it had been three years. I found myself almost holding my breath. I breathed a sigh of relief when we reached the top. Erick found a place he could pull over at the top.

"Are you sure it was on this side of the mountain, Erick?" Sara asked as we sat in the still running truck.

"I'm sure."

"Why do you want to find the exact spot, Sara?" I said and then quickly paraphrased it. It was a defensive "why" question. "I mean...I know there has to be reasons for wanting to know. What are they?"

"I don't know. I visualize it in my head, and I think if I saw the spot it would bring me some kind of closure. I want to see what she was looking at in that final moment when she decided to drive over the edge."

"She couldn't see anything but the gap in the broken rail, and she realized she had traveled quite a distance up the mountain," Erick said in a manner that caused me to wonder if he knew more about it than what he had told us. "I have to get the truck back, and it's going to be dark in about an hour. We all three are going to be getting phone calls soon if we don't start home."

"Okay, thanks for bringing me," she said as she examined the hem on her shirt.

Erick turned the truck around and we began traveling back down the mountain. We hadn't gone very far when Sara jumped.

"Wait! Pull over!" Sara was leaning forward looking out the passenger window beside me. Erick hesitated so she loudly said, "Please!"

I could tell he was reluctant to pull over, but he quickly checked the mirrors and eased the truck over in a wider space by the road. He turned the truck off and looked at us. Sara began motioning me to get out. She slid out right behind me. Erick quickly got out on his side. Sara took off jogging back up the hill until she reached a spot that must have caught her attention. We stayed on her heels, and Erick was telling us we weren't in a safe spot on the side of the road.

What Sara saw finally caught my attention. It was a fairly large stretch of the railing that looked newer than the railing on both sides of it. I looked at Erick in surprise, but he didn't seem surprised at all. I wondered if he knew the spot the whole time. I tried to catch his eye, but he was watching Sara. She was just silently looking past the railing to an area of ground that was a fairly decent drop to the tree line. The forest line seemed to be slightly disrupted in one area.

"She didn't see anything at all. She just saw a broken rail and then darkness. She knew though. She knew there was a drastic drop before the trees. She had been here before and that's when she planned it," Sara whispered before turning to Erick. Something unspoken passed between them and Erick shook his head.

It dawned on me that someone other than the witnesses had called the night it happened. It was Sara's mom. She had called Erick's dad and the witnesses had just confirmed what had happened. She didn't leave a note, but she had called Erick's dad. It was the only explanation I could think of. I wanted confirmation from Erick, but he wasn't meeting my eyes. He was still looking at Sara with concern. I turned away and looked over the edge of the cliff. The car would have been airborne for several seconds until it came down and hit the trees. The idea made my stomach feel uneasy.

"Let's go home, Sara. Your mom wouldn't want you here," I said as I lightly tugged on her arm. "Let's just call your dad and tell him you're going to stay at my house tonight. He knows you're going to anyway. We'll eat everything unhealthy in the house and watch a movie in my room."

She seemed to snap out of her gloomy mood as she smiled and agreed. She really was so easy to please. Why couldn't her mom have chosen to stay around for her? I thought. She had ended her own pain, but didn't give a thought to the pain she would cause her only child. Erick had told me he thought Sara was healing. She had reached a point in her grief where she had accepted her loss. She was enjoying being a teenager, but the sexual assault had set her back. She grieved her mom all over again. She desperately needed her, but she wasn't there to help her.

"I think I'm being cheated here. I get no junk food, friendly cuddles or a movie," he said. He attempted to sound as whiney and pitiful as he could, which caused Sara and I to laugh. He gave me one of his dimple smiles. I knew he was happy I was going to watch over Sara tonight.

As it turned out, it was me who appreciated Sara's presence. I slept poorly that night. Every time I fell asleep, I saw myself behind the wheel of a car, soaring over the edge of the cliff. There was a sudden sense of fear as the car hung in the air before I began feeling myself falling. I would wake up, gasping in fear right before the car crashed. My dreams evolved and I was suddenly trapped with Shelby in a car, and she would laugh as she sped towards the opening in the rail.

Sara would hug me when I was jolted awake and tell me it wasn't real. She would tell me I was safe at home. After the fourth time of waking, Sara got up and opened my bedroom door. Seymour came into the room and jumped up on the end of the bed and laid down. For some reason, his presence comforted me. The next time I woke up, it was morning and Seymour was sleeping between us with his head on my pillow. My dad still cautioned me about the dog, but as we laid there nose to nose, I slowly reached out and petted him on the head and down his neck. He opened his eyes and looked at me. He reached over and began swiping my whole face with his tongue. Sara woke up and saw what was happening and began laughing. He turned and gave her face a swipe before he got up and left the room, heading for his kennel.

"Do you think your dad knows?" Sara asked.

"No, he said he thought the little old woman next door was unstable, because she would see Seymour sitting by the tree late at night or early morning and call my dad to report he was loose. My dad secured the kennel door very firmly, but I think Boozer is in on the scheme. He loves to try and confuse my dad, and he's not above blaming things on the other animals. He stands beside my dad and mimics his body language. He's quite the bully himself."

Sara laughed and said, "Well, we have to excuse a little spider monkey. He has no evil intentions." A shadow briefly crossed her face.

"Yeah, I just wish our bullies would see they are actually showing everyone how insecure they feel about themselves. Of course, if you say anything about it, they just belittle you because they think you're weak. I think that's evil."

"I wish I was stronger. I wish I had the nerve to legally report what happened to me." Sara looked at me beseechingly. "You understand why I didn't do that, don't you?"

"Yes, I think people should only do what they can handle at the time. My dad said a defense attorney often goes after the victim in these kind of situations, so it makes it difficult for the person attacked. I think it would be better if you could just record your testimony once and not be confronted about it again," I said, knowing she needed to hear this more than once.

"Yeah, that would be easier," she said as she looked at her hands in her lap. It was obvious she felt guilt for some reason.

"It doesn't matter, because the really important thing is for you to feel better," I said as I lowered my head to make eye contact.

She was quiet for so long that I was going to suggest we get ready to go to school. Just when I thought she was getting better, days like today and yesterday would happen. I could tell she was struggling with something.

"Lilly?" she asked.

"Yeah?"

"Would you record me? What if he does it again to someone?"
Chapter Twenty-One

The next couple of weeks, Sara appeared to be lost somewhere in her mind, and we had a tough time reaching her. We had recorded her experience while we sat in the treehouse one day, and since that time she seemed troubled about her decision not to report the attack. She also asked Erick several times about the day we had gone to Taum Sauk. She wanted to know if he was sure it was the place it happened. He repeatedly told her he believed it was the site.

I had been having nightmares since the day we went. If we were in the treehouse, Erick would wake me up because I was crying and he would just hold me. Those were the nights I slept the best. If Sara was spending the night in my room, she would wake me up and she would tell me it wasn't real. We would then lay back to back, but I would sleep uneasily. There were nights in which I was alone and those were the worst. I would wake up alone and I had this impending sense of doom. One night I decided I was going to tell my parents the next day. I didn't know why this was happening. The trip to Taum Sauk was unsettling, but it wasn't enough to cause these terrible nightmares. As it turned out, I didn't need to, because Seymour showed up. He silently jumped up on the bed and snuggled close to me like he had never done before. I felt an immediate sense of ease. It wasn't as good as Erick, but I felt safe.

The dreams were evolving. It had started out with going over the edge of a cliff in the darkness, and it had turned into being lost in the dark. I was falling and couldn't see anything, but I knew I was going to land, and when I did, I was in my house, but everything looked slightly different. I recognized my room with all my things, but it was like I was seeing everything through a fog. I watched my parents, but they walked around in silence. The animals were moving around as those startled by a threat, but they didn't make any noise. I tried to calm them, but I just upset them more. I was scared because when they panicked other people would come into the house. I didn't know them and they wouldn't talk to any of us. They would all move towards me, threatening me, and I would run only to be lost in the dark again.

As the dreams continued to evolve I would run until I noticed the ladder of the treehouse in the dark. The ladder was very long, and I felt the people trying to reach me by climbing behind me. I knew if I turned to look, they would grab me. The dream progressed and I finally made it to the treehouse, but I knew it wasn't an entirely safe place. I huddled in the treehouse, and I could hear the strange people trying to get up the ladder and through the small door.

The dream progressed again, and the people would slowly open the small door, and I could see shadows trying to come through the door. I backed up against the furthest wall and closed my eyes. Without warning, the dream changed completely and I felt an overwhelming urge to open my eyes when the people came into the treehouse. I opened my eyes and something dark rushed me. I would sit straight up in bed with my heart pounding and struggling to breathe. I felt as though someone had been trying to suffocate me, or had been trying to cut off my air by wrapping their hands around my neck.

My dreams and Sara's mood appeared to improve on the first day of our Christmas break. We were finishing the inside of the treehouse by decorating the inside with personal things from all three of us. Our treehouse remained our safe haven. It was a world in which we didn't worry about what other people thought about us. We didn't worry about parent's approval or disapproval or our grades or our future. The world outside was different and we weren't sure who we were or what we would become. In the treehouse, there was only the present, and we could talk safely about what we hoped to be or what we feared we may be. We could talk about our fears and our hopes and nothing bad could happen, because we could always stay in the treehouse where it was always safe.

I didn't know it at the time, but there were things happening in the outside world that would soon be able to reach us even in our safe haven. I wouldn't have believed it at the time, because our time together seemed to finally put our past to rest, and I was excited about starting new. We seemed to form a bond, which would hold up even against the meanest of bullies.

My dreams were evolving again, but they were no longer nightmares. They now ended with the door of the treehouse being opened and Erick coming in to drive the shadows away. I wasn't afraid of them any longer. He would whisper to me to let go of the darkness and move into the light, so he could save me. In my dream, I finally reached out to him and he took my hand and I woke up. It was the last dream I ever had about falling in the dark and the paralyzing fear of the dark shadows.

Sara began to laugh again. On cold days, she liked for us to visit the attic and continue our hunt for treasure. We all dressed in any old clothing we found, which often left us looking odd and amusing. We would make up characters to go along with our clothing by researching on the internet the time period in which they may have been worn. Sometimes we even found letters or written material that gave us names for our characters.

Sara was better, but it was during this time I recognized Sara often questioned or needed reassurance from Erick that whatever we did would be okay. She questioned him in the same manner she did about the road site at Taum Sauk. I realized she felt safe with him too, and since he was her brother, he would always be there to help her to feel that way. She would always ask him if it was a good day to go to the attic, and he often went up for a few minutes, pretending to check it out before telling her it was a good day. It appeared to be a ritual that gave her comfort. My mom told me during that time some people who had been through traumatic events had heightened anxiety and needed reassurance they were safe even if it involved rituals or routines.

There was only one thing that happened during the Christmas break that caused me to feel uneasy. Erick showed up early one morning to show me his drawing album. He had some pictures he had drawn that caused him to question our future. He said he had some visions of me in the future. Most of them showed us being together in one place or another and they appeared to indicate we were happy, but two were different. In one picture, I sat huddled in the treehouse and I was crying. It made me feel uneasy because it reminded me of my dreams, and in the other, I was standing next to him, holding on to his arm. I again was visibly upset.

Erick admitted the drawings had been bothering him. He worried the pictures might mean we would have a break in our relationship, but I pointed out that one of the pictures after the two disturbing ones showed us sitting together in a park and it was obvious we wanted to be there. It was one of the few times I had in which I was reassuring Erick, but wasn't entirely sure if I was right.

There was something else that happened during our school break, but it didn't cause me to feel uneasy; it helped to clarify to me what was important in life. Elizabeth came to visit me for a weekend. I was so excited to see her. She had been my best friend since the third grade. She was intrigued by our treehouse, but she was confused as to why it was so important to me. I tried to allow her in a little by introducing her to my new friends.

Elizabeth really liked Erick, but, surprisingly, she was fairly cold towards Sara. They weren't there long when Erick made up some excuse of why they had to be home. I knew he was giving me a chance to tell Elizabeth about Sara, so she would know her a little better before judging her.

I told Elizabeth a little about Sara, but something kept me from telling her the whole truth. I told her enough to let her know Sara had been through a very difficult time, she didn't respond in the way I thought she would. She actually asked me if I shouldn't try to find more friends that were accepted by people at school. I had told her about my own bullying situation, and she appeared to believe my problems were caused by Sara.

We talked at length about the bullying. I felt as though I was talking to a stranger. She advised me to be careful who I chose for my friends. I wondered if she was jealous of my and Sara's friendship, but the more she talked, the more I remembered the way we used to act at school. It hit me that I had actually believed I was running around with the best and most popular group of people at school. We had our particular type of bullying. We just chose to exclude certain people. We weren't mean to people, we just didn't make any effort to include them. I realized Elizabeth hadn't changed; it was me that had really changed, and it was because of Sara and Erick.

Erick and Sara had changed my entire perspective of life. I was a completely different person than the one who left New Mexico. It was in this treehouse that she and Erick had given me clear insight into the truly important things in life. It was like waking up and finding evidence we all had a purpose in life, and I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I felt humbled by their genuine virtue. I had never met people of my own age that were so aware of the importance of integrity. They both had been through so much and yet they still strived to be kind and compassionate.

I remembered on several occasions them trying to understand why the bullies at school acted the way they did. They were sure they themselves had been through something tragic or very difficult. They chose to not judge the very people that had so harshly judged them. It didn't mean they liked them, but they didn't have to be like them. They understood pain and sometimes pain can cause them to act like a person they would never purposely choose to be.

I hugged Elizabeth when it was time for her to leave. I still loved her, but I realized we were in two different places in life. We had been losing touch, but she would always be my first friend. I now realized there were different types of friends. Some of them would be friends that would pass, but would be remembered with fond memories, while others would be people that you shared the best and worst of times together and they would know you and love you better than anyone else. After only several months, I had discovered the people I knew I was meant to meet, and they would help me to discover me or my identity. They would accept me for who I was and not try to change me into someone they wanted me to be.

When Elizabeth boarded her plane, I quickly asked if we could go straight home. My parents smiled at each other and began discussing how they wouldn't even stop to get gas. If we ran out of gas, we would rent a horse, and if the horse dropped of exhaustion, we would hitch rides, and if no one would pick us up, we would hi-jack a bus. I rolled my eyes and laughed; some things hadn't changed. I thought about that for a minute and realized they had changed. I recognized I was very lucky to have both my mom and my dad and their unconditional love and support. I realized very few parents would discover their child was sleeping in a treehouse and not say a word. They understood what was going on, so they just made the treehouse more habitable.

As soon as we got home, I got out of the car and took off running to Erick's house. I yelled and told them I would be back soon. They yelled back and told me I could have them spend the night. I stopped to turn around and jumped up and down, asking if we could order pizza. My dad held up his hands in exaggerated resignation, and my mom dramatically patted him on the back and waved a positive response. They were trying to dramatically act like I was exhausting them.

"Run fast, honey," my dad yelled. "I think people start to freeze at 32 degrees."

I knew he was making fun of me for not taking my coat. It was very cold in comparison to New Mexico. It had been a shock to our systems when winter had set in, but we had thoroughly enjoyed snow and a fire place. I had always wanted a white Christmas. It was something I had only seen on TV.

When I got to Erick's house, he was waiting at the door with a big smile on his face. I saw Sara come up behind him as she looked to see what he was smiling about. She opened the door widely and I quickly entered. I was short of breath. Erick's dad was grinning at me.

"I'm sorry," I said as I looked at all of them. Erick's dad looked confused. Evidently, they hadn't shared their reservations about Elizabeth.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. If she's your friend, we'll try to be her friends too," Erick said as he hugged me.

I looked at Sara. "She's a different kind of friend. A friend from my childhood, but not best friends; not anymore."

Sara's face lit up like the Christmas tree. I felt guilty for the way Elizabeth had treated her. I had thought about it on my way home, and realized I wouldn't allow Elizabeth to ever treat Sara like that again. I would speak up and if she didn't like it, she could go back home.

I turned to Erick's dad. "Can Erick sleep over in our guest bedroom? Sara and I will sleep in my room."

"Did you ask your parents?" Mr. Mchail asked.

"Yes, they would rather we do that than sleep in the treehouse," I responded with a grin.

"It's okay with me then, but you'll have to stop and ask Sara's dad."

Sara gathered up her coat and smiled at him. "I will. Thanks, dad. I'll probably be back on Wednesday."

Sara waved as she walked out the door. She didn't see the shocked look on his face. I saw tears gather in his eyes and smiled at him before leaving the house. I met Erick's eyes when we got outside, and noticed tears were beginning to form in his eyes as well. I reached up and kissed him on the cheek. He smiled at me when he noticed I had recognized the importance of what had just happened.

"Where is your coat, goofy?" he asked.

"I am impervious to the cold!" I said as I threw back my head and raised my arms straight out from my body, turning in circles. They both laughed as my teeth chattered. Erick took off his coat and gave it to me. It just so happened Sara's dad pulled up in his car. We immediately rushed the car and jumped inside.

"Did someone call a taxi?" Sara's dad laughed.

"Yes, please, good sir, be so kind as to allow me to pass this night with Lilly," Sara asked. We had been reading earlier works of fiction in our Communication Arts class. We all laughed as Sara's dad looked at her in confusion. Erick told him what we had been reading at school while Sara and I began talking about what kind of pizza we wanted to order. Erick and Sara's dad looked at each other and smiled. It was obvious the girls were acting like he had already given his consent. He just shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.

When we reached my house, we found my dad inside putting a leash on Seymour. Seymour seemed to have a human look of unhappiness on his face. Boozer was screeching and pulling on my dad's pant leg.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I looked from Seymour to my dad.

"Well, I was going to take Seymour to see a woman that may want to adopt him. He's been doing really well," he said with a smile.

"NO!" We all three yelled. I ran and put my arms around Seymour.

"Please, dad, don't get rid of Seymour! I promise I'll take care of him!" My voice was panicky.

"Please, Mr. Callahan, please don't get rid of him," Sara said as she joined me on the floor with Seymour.

Erick's voice was shocked. "I had no idea you were going to get rid of him. I mean...I think Lilly needs him."

"I don't understand," my dad said as he wrestled with Boozer for the leash. "I thought you knew I was just keeping him to rehabilitate him."

"Dad, you don't understand. Seymour is our dog." I looked at Sara and Erick to indicate who I meant by "our." Boozer gave my dad two smacks on the leg when he managed to get the leash from him. He brought the leash to me and sat down by Seymour.

"Seymour is different, dad. I don't know how, but he is and he doesn't need a kennel. I don't think he ever did. Please, trust me," I begged.

"Lilly, the woman who is going to adopt him has rehabilitated dogs as well," my dad said.

"He doesn't need to be rehabilitated, dad, not with us. Please, trust me."

My mom had a puzzled look on her face as she walked over to where Seymour was sitting. She reached down and touched him on the head. He just looked at her with those soulful eyes. She must have seen the intense feelings on my face.

"I would like an explanation," she said as she looked at the three of us.
Chapter Twenty-Two

I wondered in the weeks to come if everything might have turned out differently on our first day back to school, if I hadn't been so sick and unable to attend. Five days after Elizabeth had returned to New Mexico, I became very ill. I was taken to the ER, they took some x-rays and discovered I had pneumonia. My mom blamed it on my run in the cold that day, but my dad told her it was a myth that rain or cold could cause you to become ill.

It just hit me out of the blue. My whole body hurt, I had a bad cough, a headache and a fever. The doctor reluctantly allowed me to go home since my mom was going to be there all the time with me. He gave me a very strong dose of antibiotics and sent me home to bed.

I felt more horrible than I ever had in my life, but I still looked forward to Erick and Sara coming by to see me for a little while every day. My mom worried that I was contagious, but all four of our parents didn't attempt to keep them from coming. Of course, Seymour stayed by me on the bed all the time, but Boozer had to be run off because he kept trying to give me alcohol. He also kept slapping me in the face with a wet washcloth. He had witnessed my mom place one on my forehead when I first began running a fever, and now he thought everyone should have one. Sometimes I would wake up to find him patting me on the head. I realized I was getting double the amount of petting than what Seymour was receiving.

The doctor wouldn't release me to return to school for at least week, so I was going to miss out on the beginning of the second semester. I could tell Erick and Sara were disappointed, but Erick didn't want me to do anything that would cause me to get worse. He and Sara planned on bringing me my homework every afternoon. It was a good excuse for them to come to my house afterschool every day.

On the day prior to their first day back, Erick shared with me he had been having an uneasy feeling for the last week. I could tell he was worried it may have something to do with my illness. He tried to think of excuses for staying home with me. He reminded me of Boozer right before he would pull some stunt, like getting into the bathroom to steal all the washcloths.

I seemed to pick up on Erick's sense of uneasiness one day as I waited for them to finish school and come by my house. I was feeling good enough to be worried as the hours of the day drug on. I slept on and off through the morning hours. At noon, I got a phone call. I didn't recognize the number but I answered it. It was Shelby.

"I'm so sorry to hear you're sick. We all missed you today, but I'm sure we'll be seeing you soon," Shelby said with a sickening sweetness. I could hear her friends laughing in the back as she hung up the phone. I looked at my phone like it was some odd foreign object and dropped it on the bed beside me.

My sense of uneasiness increased. I felt a need to be at that school. Seymour ears came up as he saw me sit up in bed. I tried to pull the cover back, but a wave of dizziness hit me. Seymour immediately stood up and straddled my legs. I put my hands over my ears as he barked. The noise seemed to bounce around in my head, causing sharp pains and making me feel queasy. My mom came into the room and I glared at Seymour.

"Traitor," I whispered.

"Lilly, what are you doing?" she asked as she noticed Seymour straddling my legs.

"Something's wrong, mom. I know it. Shelby called and taunted me about not being at school," I said to her, trying to get her to realize why I needed to at least get up.

"Lilly, that girl is just instigating and trying to get you to worry. What exactly does she think she can do with you home sick in bed? She has to know I would have her arrested if she came on our property, so don't let her get to you." My mom straightened my covers as she placed her hand on my shoulder, encouraging me to lay back down. Seymour laid down by my side and rested his big head on my leg.

"She's more likely to go after Sara. She knows that's how to get to me."

"Honey, Erick is at school. You know he will look after her. I'm going to call the school and tell them she is making harassing telephone calls," she said as she pulled her phone out of her pocket and pulled the school's number up. She hit the call button as she stood up, putting her hand on her hip and walked several paces away from the bed. I laid back on my pillow to listen to her.

I heard her telling the school that she was tired of the school not doing anything about this girl bullying her child. She said they had said they would take care of it before and then nothing would happen. She even asked them to check on Sara Townsend, but they must have pulled the confidentiality card, because she told them to call her dad and get his permission then. We both knew Sara's dad was infuriated with the school's nonresponse to the bullying situation, so I knew my mom would call him herself.

The school's administration had seemed serious about confronting the bullying problems the day Erick and I had been questioned in the assistant principal's office, but we had heard they were getting some resistance from the school district. We had heard nothing about it since that day. I was shocked they knew what had happened and it wasn't the highest priority on their agenda. Erick and I had tried to remain optimistic, surmising they had to go through some protocol or something.

I was hoping after Sara had us tape her testimony she may be willing to go to the police, but it always seemed the wrong time to push her. She was struggling with depression, but she resisted going to a doctor. I was always afraid she would just stay lost and never come back from one of her bad days.

I watched now as my mom slipped her phone back into her pocket with an aggravated sigh. She turned to look at Seymour. She sat down on the bed and scratched him behind his ears. He slightly wagged his tail as he shifted his head to look at my mom.

"Sometimes, it seems like there's an old wise person living inside this dog. Any person who believes animals don't have souls, needs to look at this dog and tell me they don't see something there. We heard those horrid stories about him, but from the moment he saw your dad, he never showed any sign of aggression. It's just he's so big and you can see his battle scars. You can just tell by looking at him how much damage he could cause if he turned on a human. And if he had turned out to be unpredictable, we may have had a serious problem."

"We should have known when he didn't immediately kill Boozer," I said with a tired smile. "I wish I knew what had brought him to us. I have a feeling he was more abused than an abuser."

"I believe that too," she said. "I hope he got justice for what they did to him."

"I think they'll pay in some way sometime, if they haven't already." I looked at him as he lay quietly watching us. It wouldn't have surprised me if he had opened his mouth and started talking.

My mom held out her hand and Seymour looked at it before he lifted his paw and laid it in my mom's hand. He took it out and put it back down. He shifted his eyes to my mom as if to say, "Please don't ask me to do all those stupid dog tricks."

"Mom, if I fall asleep, will you make sure and wake me up when Erick and Sara come by?"

"I promise," she said before she kissed me on the forehead and left Seymour to watch over me.

The next time I opened my eyes Erick was sitting by me on the bed with a worried look on his face.

"Hi," I said as I blinked my eyes, trying to wake up.

"Hi, you," he said with a small smile. He reached out and took my hand, kissed it and held it to his cheek. I could tell something was wrong.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I thought of my earlier phone call from Shelby.

"Nothing you can do anything about right now," he said as he smoothed my hair back from my face. "It was just a rough day. Shelby is up to her old antics."

I now had a feeling something was really wrong. I could see the strain on his face.

"Where's Sara?" I asked as I tried to sit up. Erick helped me to raise myself by putting another pillow behind my back.

"She's okay," Erick said. He was running his eyes over my face but he wasn't making any direct eye contact.

"Where's Sara?" I repeated with more urgency in my voice. "What's happened?"

"Lilly, you don't need to deal with this right now. Please, just let us handle it. I don't think you understand just how sick you've been."

"Erick! Answer me! What's happened and where's Sara?"

Erick pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. He appeared to be at a complete loss as to what to tell me. I felt my heart begin to accelerate with a deep sense of foreboding. The adrenaline began to race through my body and I sat up straight in bed. I ignored the dizziness and grabbed Erick's arms.

"Erick, tell me!" I was beginning to panic. Erick was looking at me in concern.

"Mom? Dad!" I yelled. I felt the back of my throat burn. Erick framed my face with his hands.

"Lilly, calm down. They're not here...they're looking for Sara. They're all looking for her, so everything is being done. Please, calm down!"

"Why? Did Shelby do something? She called me today. What did she do to her? Oh god, it wasn't Jacob, was it?"

"No, it was mostly Shelby and some of her friends. She wasn't physically hurt. They just upset her, but they'll find her."

"What did they do?" My mind was racing with thoughts of what may be going on. "Just tell me!"

"Well, the assistant principal, Mr. Millhouse, evidently told his son, who's a junior, the truth about Sara and I being brother and sister. He told just one of his friends, who told just one of his friends and so on and now everyone knows. Shelby lied and told her friends Sara and I were involved last year in a sexual relationship. She has the kids at school believing we knowingly had an incestuous relationship."

"Oh, my god," I whispered. "That's ridiculous! Everyone knew you and Sara were just friends. They all knew your families were friends. Most of them have known you two for years! Oh, my god, I..."

"What is it?"

"The first day of school I asked a couple of people if you two had a relationship. I had just met both of you, and most... Well, everyone I asked said no! I'm sorry, Erick."

"Lilly, that's perfectly normal for you to wonder something like that. You saw how well we knew each other and you didn't know either of us. I would have wondered if the situation had been reversed," Erick said as he tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear.

My eyes flew toward the window. "Did you check the treehouse?"

"That's the first place I looked. I've looked at all the places we hang out – even the attic and I couldn't find her, so I went and told my dad and now they're all looking for her. Your mom said I should stay with you, which is what I wanted to do anyway," he said as he pulled me close to him. I wrapped my arms around him. The whole situation had to be a nightmare for Sara.

"She normally would have come to me, Erick. Why didn't she do that?"

"Lilly, you really have been sick. She probably didn't want to worry you."

"It doesn't matter. She's like my sister too." I leaned back to look at him. Something seemed to still be a little off.

"What aren't you telling me? Please, don't keep anything from me," I pleaded.

"Well, I don't know if this means anything, but the only other person I could think she may have talked to was Jeff. He called me while I was looking for her and that's when I decided to go tell dad."

"What did he say?"

"He said he thought Sara had been really upset about today, and after school she asked him if he would take her to Taum Sauk, which, of course, he said no. He tried to get her to let him take her home, but she just ran from him."

"Erick, we have to go there! Our parents don't know we took her there!"

"Yes, they do now. I told them everything. Things were too bad today, Lilly," he said quietly as he shook his head. "I saw the stupidity of the whole thing, but they really got to Sara, because they brought up the Jacob thing and how she proved she would have sex with anyone. Evidently, they followed her everywhere today."

"Erick, they've put her in a position that makes it difficult for her to come to you for protection! Shelby succeeded in taking you away from her right now. I have to go find her!"

"No, Lilly! You're not capable of doing that right now. It's not going to help Sara in the long run if you make yourself sicker. I think she realizes that. She needs for you to get better."

I buried my face in my hands. I had never felt so useless in my life. I could feel the fatigue weighing my body down. My adrenaline had taken me so far, but it was wearing off despite my frame of mind. I wanted to get up and find her. Her face flashed through my mind. I saw the light in her eyes when we first talked about being friends, the hurt and pain when she told us what had happened with Jacob, and the lost and haunted look in her eyes when she talked about her mom or when she needed reassurance from Erick. I hated my body right now. I very seldom got sick. Why did I have to get sick now?

I heard my mom and dad come in the house and Mr. Townsend's voice. Erick jumped up to go see what was happening. Without thinking, I moved to get out of bed, but as soon as I pushed myself to my feet, my legs buckled and I crumbled by the bed. Everything became grey as a darkness began to close around it.

"Lilly! What are you doing?" Sara knelt beside me. I felt myself being lifted and realized Erick had picked me up off the floor. I heard my mom come into the room.

"Lay her back in bed, Erick. She's just very weak," my mom instructed him. "She needs to get some fluids in her."

"Are you sure we shouldn't just take her to the hospital?" Erick asked in doubt.

"I talked to the doctor earlier and he said if she wasn't feeling better in a couple of days, we may need to take her in so they can hook her up to an IV. She was finally able to get some fluids in today, so I think we're safe. We need to get her something now before she goes back to sleep. She needs to take her second dose of antibiotics too."

My head was beginning to clear, and I noticed Sara standing back with her hand over her mouth. Seymour stood beside her, watching me. When my mom left the room, Seymour jumped up on the end of the bed and laid down beside me.

"I'm so sorry, Lilly. I should have thought about everyone worrying about where I was, but I just couldn't think and I really needed to be alone to think about what happened today."

"Erick told me," I said as I held out my hand so she would come to the bed. "Everybody knows it's not true. They just like drama."

I noticed for the first time she was dressed in the white dress with the head piece we found in the attic. She had more make-up on than usual. I wondered what had made her want to dress up. She looked beautiful with her blond hair and blue eyes. I also realized Seymour hadn't been there before they came in. She followed my eyes to Seymour.

"I just needed to really think. I don't even know what I was thinking when I dressed up. I don't really even remember going by my house. I just started walking. I had to figure things out. The next thing I knew Seymour was with me, nudging me with his nose," she said, "and I realized it was dark outside. I didn't know what to do, so I started walking back to town, and that's when my dad found me."

"Do you remember asking Jeff to take you to Taum Sauk?" Erick asked her.

"No, not really, but I was walking in that direction, so I guess that's where I was going."

"Sara, what made you want to go to Taum Sauk?" I asked, wishing more than anything that we had never taken her there.

My mom came back into the room with some juice and soup, so Sara moved out of her way. I watched her as my mom placed the tray over my lap. She had wandered to the mirror and almost seemed surprised to see the make-up on her face. She grabbed a tissue out of a nearby box and wiped the lipstick off. My mom was talking to me, but I couldn't take my eyes off of Sara. She moved to the window seat and looked out at the back yard. I knew she was wishing she could go to the treehouse, but it was cold out, and I couldn't imagine how she haven't noticed when she was walking around outside in just the flimsy dress.

"I think we need to do that," I heard Erick say.

"What? Do what?" I asked, realizing I had missed an entire conversation between my mom and Erick. Things weren't making sense. Something terribly wrong was happening.
Chapter Twenty-Three

"We need to leave you to eat and rest," Erick said.

"No, not yet, I want to talk to Sara," I said as I looked at the determined looks pass between my mom and Erick. "Please, just a few minutes. Can I talk to her alone?"

Erick looked from my mom to me with what appeared to be reluctance. They knew something and they weren't going to tell me. I couldn't believe Erick looked ready to overrule my mom.

"I will just talk to her for a few minutes. I promise I won't upset her. In fact, I need to tell her so she won't worry," Sara said without turning from the window.

"Let's give them a few minutes. It's been a hard day for everyone and I know my daughter. She'll sit up all night until we let them talk," my mom said, trying to reassure Erick.

I wondered if I was dying and they just weren't telling me.

At that moment, I heard Eva word for word in my head saying Sara was on a difficult journey, and all I could do to help was to listen. For some reason, I knew right now, before any other time, this was the moment I was supposed to listen. I felt some of my adrenaline return and was preparing for an argument. Thankfully, it didn't seem to be necessary.

Erick walked over and hugged Sara. I heard her whisper to him she was lucky to have him for a brother. He next came over and kissed me on the forehead and said goodnight. It was his turn to whisper to me that it wasn't my responsibility to keep her safe. He said something very odd. He told me we never would have been capable of stopping what was happening. I knew he was referring to our telling the school officials the truth about Sara being his sibling.

As they left the room, Sara turned to smile at me. Her smile seemed to light up the room. She rushed to the other side of my bed and sat with Seymour between us. She reached out and ran her hand over his head as she looked at me.

"Lilly, I know all this is strange, but I understand things now. I feel like a burden has been lifted from my shoulders. I feel so bad for causing you to worry while you were sick, but I promise everything is going to be okay now. I feel free from the pain and fear. I'm taking back their power over me. I won't allow them to continue to make me feel worthless. It won't be easy for them anymore."

She sounded like she had reached a point in which she would no longer allow Shelby to manipulate her. I saw the certainty in her eyes and felt a sense of relief.  
"Shelby has lost, she has finally lost. You know the people she surrounds herself with are just going along with her because they fear her. I don't fear her anymore and I don't fear Jacob. I want to take the tape to the police. Would you promise to help me with that?"

"Of course, I will," I said with a sense of relief. The making of the video had turned out to be more emotionally difficult than we both could have ever anticipated. "I am so proud of you! You will keep him from doing this again."

Sara shook her head with a radiant smile. "I understand what has to happen now, and I am no longer worried about what other people think. Thank you, Lilly. I hate my walk caused so much worry, but I needed it. I truly understand now."

She leaned in and gave me a very tight hug. "You're the best friend anyone could ever have."

She jumped up, trotted out of the room, waving as she went. I could hear her dad talking downstairs and then everyone was gone. I ate some of my soup and drank as much of the liquid as I could hold.

I felt a huge sense of relief. She was going to be okay. After everything, she was actually going to be okay.

I set my tray down by my bed, knowing Seymour would wait patiently for his chance to finish what I had left. I giggled a few moments later as he quietly got down from the bed. He was in stealth mode as he moved in to quickly finish what was left of the soup. After he finished he quietly and slowly moved back to lay down in his spot by my side. I smiled as I felt the warmth of his body next to me in the bed and I drifted off to sleep.

********************

I heard a noise that was pulling me from a deep sleep. I thought I was dreaming at first, but when I opened my eyes, I saw Seymour sitting on the window seat. He came over and licked me in the face, which managed to bring me fully awake. I rubbed my eyes and watched as he made his way back to the window seat. He was whining as he danced on his feet, looking out the window.

Sara must have gone to the treehouse anyway. I could tell the sky was starting to lighten, so it must have been very early in the morning. She wasn't upset when she left, quite the opposite, so maybe she was a little worried about the legal process she now wanted to pursue.

I pulled the covers back from my bed so I could go look, and I could tell I was a little stronger. I was wobbly when I stood up, but I now had some strength. I made my way over to window just as Seymour jumped off and headed downstairs. I watched him go before I turned to the window. It was getting light out because I could see fairly well. I looked for a light in the treehouse but I couldn't see one. Maybe Seymour had seen an animal or something. He often watched the squirrels out the window as if he truly wanted to understand what they were doing and why they were doing it. The wrinkles on his head when he was curious always made me grin.

I was about to turn away when something white caught my eye. It wasn't in the treehouse, but out on the middle of the large branch that supported a big part of the treehouse. It also was the limb we used to hang our bucket from when we wanted to lift something up. I frowned as the window clouded over from the cold and I wiped it clean with my hand. When I looked again, my heart seemed to stop in my chest. Sara was sitting on the branch in the white dress, and she had wound the rope around several times to shorten it. I looked in horror as I realized the bucket was gone and the end of the rope was tied around Sara's neck. She was sitting still looking at the ground.

"Sara!" I screamed. "Sara!"

I began beating on the window still screaming her name. I tried to open it and it was stuck, so I went back to hitting it with my fist. I saw her look up and see me. She smiled almost reassuringly, but then looked at the ground again. I began screaming "No" as I continued trying to break the window. In my panic, I believe I thought I could reach her if I just broke the glass.

I caught motion out of the corner of my eye and looked to see Eva there. She stood in her white dress, looking up at Sara, her arms reaching out. Seymour was literally howling. I watched in shock as Sara jumped off the branch... Eva's arms were waiting for her. I heard a loud buzzing in my head, and as before, the world went grey before fading completely to black.

Later, I woke up and was in my bed again. Sara was there, looking at me with sadness. I could see the rope burn around her neck. She got to her feet when she saw my eyes open. I began crying uncontrollably.

"Don't cry, Lilly, I'm okay," she whispered to me.

I couldn't stop. I kept seeing her in the white dress sitting on the limb. I felt someone lift me up and realized Erick was there. He laid my back against his chest, holding me tightly.

He rocked me as he said, "Go back to sleep. It's over."

"Everything will be okay, Lilly. I'm sorry," Sara said as she watched Erick holding me.

I drifted off to sleep again, feeling secure in Erick's arms. I knew Sara would stay close to me. She would be there when I woke up. All day I drifted in and out of sleep. I heard my mom talking to the doctor on the phone one time. When she hung up, I heard her tell my dad that the doctor said to let me sleep. The doctor thought it was a combination of the pneumonia and shock. I could hear my dad complaining about what it took to get a doctor's attention.

Erick was there several times as well. One time he was calming Seymour as he continued to whine off and on as he watched Sara. Sara stayed close that day to reassure me when I woke. It was like I was in a thick fog and the fatigue just kept pulling me down to sleep.

I had bad dreams of seeing Sara jump from the limb of the tree. Eva was always there, but I would wake up feeling as though I had been the one catching Sara as she tried to hang herself. I kept seeing the smile she gave me before she would be falling into my arms.

The next couple of days passed in a blur. I always felt my mom and dad hovering not far from me and Erick and Sara would be there at times together and sometimes one at a time. I knew they needed more of a response from me, but I couldn't seem to put anything into words.

Finally, one day Erick was there alone with me when I woke up. My mind and body appeared to finally be working together. I talked to Erick about what happened that night, and he told me how Seymour had pretty much alerted the whole neighborhood to what was happening. He told me how my mom and dad had walked outside and discovered what had happened. Eva didn't stay for very long. She just made sure Sara was okay and had left. She had then gone to Erick's house to tell them about what had occurred.

"I just don't know what to say to her," I told him quietly. "I'm scared I will say the wrong thing."

"You won't," he said. "Just be yourself."

"I don't know how to be myself around her now," I replied.

"Why didn't Eva tell me Sara may do something like that?"

"I don't think she was allowed to talk about it."

"I wouldn't be so scared if I had known what to expect. Now, feeling scared is all I feel. I don't know how to handle a situation like this, and my parents don't know how to help me."

Erick was quiet for a moment. He seemed unsure of how to handle the situation himself. I could tell he was worried about something.

"Eva, said we have to talk to her about it or nothing will change," he said with a worried look on his face.

"Erick, I can't do it! What if we make things worse?" I was definitely out of my comfort zone.

"I don't think we can make things worse at this point. She said we need to be the one to talk to her."

"Why? Why does it have to be us? She should do it! I'm not ready!"

"Not ready for what?" Sara stood in the door way.

I felt my heart accelerate as it often did when Sara was around now. I didn't know what would happen if I said the wrong thing. She seemed so fragile in some ways and in others she seemed stronger. I no longer knew what to say to her.

"Are you all right, Lilly?" Sara asked as she came to sit by me on the bed.

Seymour was laying on the bed and he began to whine. It appeared he was uncomfortable too.

"Why is Seymour whining all the time now? Do you think he's thinking about what happened that night?" Sara asked as she looked at Seymour in sympathy.

"I think so," I said cautiously.

"I feel bad that it scared him so much," Sara said as she moved closer to him.

"You know he's always been sensitive about how we all feel, Sara. He's probably worried you're not feeling better," I said quickly so she didn't begin to worry about Seymour.

"Well, I am feeling better, but I'm feeling like...sad or empty. I can't talk to my dad. He's so upset that he just sits around and asks me why. I try to tell him, but he doesn't seem to want to talk to me. He was talking to someone about the hospital the other day. I know he wants me to go...and I will."

A look of sadness crossed her face.

"He cries a lot. He got a call about the Homeschooling and for some reason it made him upset."

"We need to go to the treehouse. It's where we can really talk," Erick said softly.

"No! Not yet!" I said anxiously.

"Lilly, we have to do this," he said. "It's the only way we can help now." He began wrapping a thick cover around me.

A flash of Eva went through my mind. I knew we had to do this, but I was scared. I looked at Erick as I reluctantly got to my feet and slipped my feet into some tennis shoes. I was weak and Erick had to almost carry me. I felt as though I was literally dragging my feet as we walked out, and Erick helped me to climb up into the treehouse.

Sara sat cross-legged as she waited for us to get into the treehouse. She looked at us expectantly. She knew we were going to tell her something important. Erick looked at me in dread, and I couldn't stop the tear from running down my face.

"I know why your dad isn't talking to you, Sara..." Erick began.

"Yeah, and your dad or I guess our dad won't talk to me either. He seems angry."

"He's not angry at you, and I know why he isn't talking to you either."

"Why, then! I've told everyone I'm sorry a hundred times, and they act like they don't want me to talk to them!"

"Sara, think about what you have always known about me that others don't." He paused to see if she was beginning to understand what he was trying to say, but she just looked at him in confusion.

"They don't talk to you because they can't see you," Erick whispered.

I closed my eyes tightly as I felt the tears running down my face. I didn't want to look at her. It had been scaring me to look at her. I hated seeing the red burn around her neck, but she was still Sara.

"That can't be true, Erick. I don't know what you mean! Lilly can see me!"

I couldn't stop the tears as I felt her look at me. I put my hands over my face, trying to hide from the pain. I was so scared, but at the same time, this was someone I loved. I forced myself to make eye-contact.

"Lilly?" Sara asked hesitantly.

I just shook my head yes.

"I don't know why Lilly can see you, but she's always been able to see Eva too."

"Who is Eva?" Sara asked.

Erick shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know really, but she's not a human spirit. I think she may have been here for you."

"She told me," I was struggling to talk through my tears, "you were on a journey, but...but she didn't tell me how the journey was going to end. I'm sorry. I thought she was a counselor or something."

Sara was quiet for a long moment. She started to reach out to touch me, but then pulled her hand back. She faded in and out of my vision as she struggled with the truth. She looked towards the house.

"Seymour can see me. I'm scaring him," she whispered.

"I think you were right the first time; he's sad," I said as I tried to touch her, but as always, it was just slightly chilly air. She was just energy now...a soul.

"I'm never going to grow up, and I'm never going to have any children, and I'm never..." she was cut off by an illumination above her, it slowly began to descend. It appeared to fill the entire treehouse. It became so bright the treehouse, the tree, and everything around us disappeared and there was only the light. I was filled with an incredible sense of peace. We watched as Eva stepped out of the light.

"It's time to go, Sara. Your journey is over. We had hoped you would make it, because you had such a wonderful future ahead of you. You would have been very happy." Eva's face reflected a deep sadness. "Lilly must continue your journey for you. The hatred, violence, and cruelty among children must stop."

"No, please, I want to live. I can see now how much I want to live."

"As it will always be for those who choose to leave before their time," Eva said, "but your suffering has not gone unnoticed, so I will lead you into the light of God. You no longer belong in this world."

I saw Eva stretching her hand out towards Sara. Surprisingly, through the white light, grief struck my heart. "I love you, Sara! I'll make sure no one ever forgets."

Sara looked with devastation between Erick and me before slowly placing her hand in Eva's. She gave us a sad smile, saying, "In the top of the treehouse is my goodbye. I left it for...everyone."
Chapter Twenty-Four

I looked at the administrative staff and knew they were slightly uncomfortable about what I wanted to do. They didn't like the fact that they weren't entirely sure of what I was going to say. I had given them an outline, but the issue was so serious they knew I could easily deviate from the outline and there would be little they could do about it.

I thought about all the accusations I could start throwing around, but they would be too interested in how they were going to defend themselves to really hear what I had to say. I needed them to hear me. I needed them all to hear me. Sara was counting on it.

Erick and I sat on the stage in the gymnasium during an assembly. No one had the nerve to tell me I didn't have a right to be there. This whole situation was going to end up in the courtroom, and it was very important they didn't appear resistant or in opposition to my intervention. I was an eye witness to everything and Erick was there to back me up.

I had Sara's letter in my hand, but didn't really know what I was going to say. I had jotted down an outline just to by-pass the school's policies. I was there for Sara and everyone else like her.

Erick squeezed my hand and I realized the principal had said my name. I looked at him, as I had many days in the recent past, and saw Sara's eyes. It was funny how you don't notice those things until something or someone brought it to your attention.

I walked up to the podium and laid Sara's letter there. I thought back on everything that had happened, and I felt a sense of grief that was too awful to try to put into words. I knew I had to try.

"My name is Lilly Callahan. I am a freshman who was new to the school district this year. I know some of you, but I have yet to meet many of you. I have been a victim of bullying since my first day, but I'm not here today for me. I'm here for my best friend, Sara Townsend. She can't be here to tell her story, because she hanged herself in my backyard several weeks ago."

I heard a collective gasp come from the students as well as some of the administrative staff sitting behind me. The staff knew what had happened, but I doubt they realized I was going to blurt it out in that manner. The time for choosing your words carefully had passed.

"She was the victim of bullying that consisted of harassment, violence and sexual assault."

I heard mumblings from the students and the teachers and I just stopped. I made it clear I would stand there all day if I had to do so to get their attention. After a few minutes, everything started to quiet down. I noticed the principal start to rise from his seat, but I turned with a loud "No!" He sat back in his seat and I could tell he wouldn't get up again.

"Sara was twelve years old when her mom committed suicide. I didn't know this, but when a parent commits suicide it greatly increases the chances that their children will try and many will succeed in doing the same. It also greatly increases their chances of struggling with psychiatric disorders, such as, major depression. Major depression, like a lot of other disorders, is extremely hereditary. It doesn't take much to trigger the disorder, but in this case the bullying led to Sara having the disorder. It hit her hard after a very traumatic event. The doctor diagnosed her with post-traumatic stress syndrome and major depression.

Many people don't understand that psychiatric disorders are no different than a medical disorder. Depression is a medical disorder, but unlike something like diabetes, you can rarely see the symptoms through medical tests. For that reason, it can prove to be much more dangerous.

Sara slipped through my fingers at a time I thought she was feeling much better. It turned out to be the opposite. Some people can be so depressed that it's only when they begin to feel better that they finally have the energy to commit suicide, or as in Sara's case, she made the decision to commit suicide and realized she would no longer have to live with the bullying and the pain. She was relieved to find a way out."

I had told myself I wasn't going to cry, but for some reason I remembered flashes of Sara when she was crying, laughing, playing and sadness. Her face flashed through my mind in rapid succession and I had to stop to swallow the tears. I noticed that a couple of students were becoming emotional. I again didn't care. It had to stop.

"I'm going to read to you the suicide letter she left me and Erick. I want you to hear her words, and I hope you never have to hear words like this from someone you love."

Dear Lilly and Erick,

If you are reading this, I will already be gone. It's important to me that you understand why.

I understand now why my mom made the choice she made. but I still believe she made the choice too late. I will not do the same. The pain is unbearable and I see no way out of it, so I must act now and don't make the mistake of acting when there is going to be a child left behind. I am sorry that my decision will probably affect you, but please, please forgive me. I see no other way out of this dark place. Your friendship and your support have meant everything to me. It allowed me to hang on a little longer and create wonderful memories to take with me.

I wish I could have been strong enough to deal with the pain, but I felt as though my heart was being ripped open so those around me could watch it bleed. You have given me the strength to see that what happened with that boy was not my fault. I said no. I said stop, I said I want to leave, and I begged for help but no one helped me. For a long time, I believed it was because I was not worth saving, but I know now that I didn't deserve it. It wasn't my fault, but I am still left with the pain. Please take the recording and my written testimony, which I have included with this letter and go to the police. Tell them I'm very sorry I wasn't strong enough to do it myself. I hope it will keep it from happening again.

I am very tired and I don't have the energy to go on. When I finally made the decision, I felt a sense of relief. I wasn't going to have to battle anymore. I could give up. I could stop the drama I was causing other people by choosing to leave. I realize it's a selfish thing to do, but I will never stop hoping you can forgive me.

The three of us created a world together and it was wonderful. No one was cruel or violent and we could be ourselves and no one would judge us. I don't think people realize how important it is to feel accepted. It is hard to not be able to figure out why people don't like you and why they choose you to bully. I think people despise weakness and yet it is very hard to be strong when you stand alone. You both tried your best to help me, but I was already isolated in that very dark place and I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't know how to describe it to anyone.

Life was too hard and I was making it harder for you. Now you can live a life without someone always demanding your attention. I hate that I put you in that position, because you will forever wonder if you could have done something to change my mind. Please, believe me when I tell you 'no' because it was just too late. Too much damage had already been done.

My and Erick's dad told me one day that a couple of years after I'm out of high school, I won't care what all these people think about me. He didn't know about everything when he told me that. I don't think many people understand just how painful even a little bullying can cause someone. It destroys your soul little by little until there are not enough pieces to put it back together again. It becomes difficult to believe those good things people say about you, and you hold on to hurtful things forever. They haunt you each and every moment you have a doubt about yourself.

I love you both very much. Lilly, you are the best friend anybody could ever have and Erick, you will always be the brother who tried to take good care of me. I pray every day that I will somehow know if you both are happy. I want to be able to watch over you and keep you safe.

Please, tell my two dads how much I love them. One is my heart and the other my soul. They both were a blessing for me. Just as you two have been.

I realize this is the very worst possible way to say goodbye to someone. I honestly believe we will see each other again. I will be waiting for you both. Until then, please take care of our treehouse as long as you can. It truly was a magical place for us all. God bless you.

Love Always,

Sara

I again stopped for a long moment as I tried to get my emotions under control. Everyone was completely quiet this time. I took several deep breathes so I could continue.

"Those were the words she left us with, and I will always do my best to stop bullying. I was told by someone very special that Sara's story was a testament of how the cruelty and violence among us must stop. Bullying is not a bad behavior, it is a serious crime. If you have not been a victim of bullying, you probably know someone that has. We no longer can just sit back and watch it happen to someone else. If you are afraid of being called the terrible word "snitch," then I hope the school will put up a locked box or some other method so people can write information about being bullied or being a witness to bullying. I want to change "snitch" into a term, which implies a hero, bravery, and integrity.

I have been a witness to death." I continued. "It is truly a scary and traumatic sight. There is nothing about the word snitch that can compare to that. It will be burned in my memories for as long as I live.

Before I go, I want to tell you something. I was late to school today, because I took the video of Sara testifying to the crime she was subjected to, and a copy of her testimony about everything that happened to her to the police. She is no longer a victim."

I stopped as I noticed movement in the crowd.

"Principal Ellington, I would like it to go on record that Shelby Anders and Jacob Myers are trying to leave the assembly. I don't think it should be allowed."

The doors to the gymnasium opened as if on cue, and two police officers entered the room. I searched the room. Could Sara be here now? I wondered. I looked at Erick and he appeared to read my mind and shook his head no.

I had hoped she may come back to visit me, but I knew I wouldn't see her in this life again. Only Erick could truly see spirits, mine appeared to be a one-time thing, although Erick disagreed. He believed I did have some psychic ability I was unaware of. He believed it was important I had been allowed to see Eva and Sara, because I had been chosen to continue Sara's journey.

As far as Erick's ability, I knew now it was the reason Sara always wanted him to check the attic of the old house we lived in, and the reason he was able to tell exactly where her mom crashed. Erick told me Sara's mom had appeared to him that day on Taum Sauk Mountain and pointed at the place her car had landed. Sara needed to know for some reason. He claimed he needed to know about my coming to Missouri, and it had been the first time he had been truly grateful for his gift.

People were beginning to talk and the raised voices returned my attention to the present. I had to raise my voice so I could be heard above the murmurings.

"I only have one more thing to say right now – this is our school. The students and teachers must all participate to keep bullying out of our district. The next time you see someone being bullied, speak up and do something about it, because you may be able to stop it before it's too late. Remember that speaking up is not a snitch, it's a hero."

I just left the podium without further notice. I had said what I wanted to, and I would keep saying it until bullying was no longer a problem. I knew I would be talking about it all my life, because human behavior can be so hard to change.

When I turned away, Erick was waiting for me. I slipped my hand into his as we walked off the stage. We didn't even look back as we walked past the police officers and down the hall to our lockers.

I still cried everyday over Sara, but I knew with time it would get easier. Erick and I had each other to lean on, and we would have been perfectly happy to stay to ourselves, but we weren't going to do that. We would do our best to stop any bullying that occurred. We would reach out and befriend those who appeared to be lonely or friendless.

We also were going to do everything we could to help Sara's legal case. We would never allow anyone to forget what happened, because it couldn't be allowed to happen again. We had begun researching bullying policies from all over the world. We would do our best to promote anti-bullying environments.

Erick and I were quiet while we walked home. We still were trying to figure out what our world looked like without Sara Townsend. We had a big empty place missing.

"Do you think she can see us?" I asked.

"Yeah, I do. She was here for a very important reason. It's all so painful, but unfortunately, real emotional growth happens during those painful times," he replied.

"I think it's even harder, because we know how much she regretted it. She couldn't see through her pain just how much she wanted to live. Why didn't God help her? He saw how much pain she was in and he didn't save her."

"It looks that way from our viewpoint, but you have to remember there's a place waiting for us that is peaceful and loving. Sara's not hurting anymore. She's safe and loved. I really believe God sheds more tears than anyone when we are hurting, but... it's necessary for humans to grow or evolve."

"I hadn't thought about it like that before. Maybe being here happy is still in no way close to the happy you have in heaven," I said and paused, "but I still want to be here as long as I can."

"Me too." He shook his head in agreement. "I think God knows we're hurting too, but we have something that other people don't. We have each other and we have our memories of Sara. We'll keep her alive as long as we live."

"I like that idea. In some way, it will be like still having her with us. I don't have to talk to myself anymore. I can talk to Sara and know she may somehow be able to hear me," I said with a grin.

"I hope you'll talk to me too. I really don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been here when this happened. I'm still so angry. I would have really ended up in trouble. I wouldn't have been able to talk to everyone like you did today. I would probably be yelling and blaming everyone. It would have become about my behavior and not about Sara. I knew you would be important to me when I started seeing you when I was younger," he said as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"I know adults can't possibly believe we even know what real love it, but they're wrong. I love you in a way that your happiness is much more important to me than mine is. I think whatever happens, I will always love you."

He picked me up and swung me in a large circle. I couldn't control the laugh that escaped from me. I loved the side of him that told me he wanted to hold on to some of our childhood. He set me on the ground and captured my face in his hands before kissing me.

"I have to ask you. Did you know I loved you so much?" he inquired.

"I guessed somehow. It could be because you actually said the words every day."

"Let's go to our treehouse. Sara was right. It's like our own magical world far away from the sometimes-harsh reality of this world." Erick said.

"Yes, it is magical. There are good memories and sad memories, but they all belong just to us and Sara. We need to let kids our age know it's still okay to have a magical treehouse or clubhouse. Maybe we can even help them to just meet places where they can talk and no one is ever judged."

I felt better for the first time since everything had happened with Sara. It was exciting to think about creating places that were free from judgment while everyone was encouraged to talk about their feelings and dreams. A whole group of people could stick together and find ways to confront bullying without violence.

"We can never give up, Lilly. We can't ever stop fighting for Sara and other kids like her," Erick said with determination.

"We won't, I promise. If we fail one time, we'll succeed the next time. We will keep trying no matter what. We will do it because we love Sara."

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