

Tales to Read Before the End of the World

A Collection of Short Stories

by Hadena James
All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without prior written permission of the author.

This book is a work of fiction. Any names, places, characters, and incidents are a product of the author's imagination and are purely fictitious. Any resemblances to any persons, living or dead, are completely coincidental.

Tales to Read Before the End of the World

Copyright © Hadena James 2012

All Rights Reserved

Smashwords Edition

**Smashwords Edition, License Notes**

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Acknowledgments

For everyone who has ever read my short stories, whether they were in writing class, a random friend or a professor who encouraged me to turn at least one of the stories contained within into something more...
Other Works By

Hadena James

Dark Cotillion (Book 1 in the Brenna Strachan Series)

Dark Illumination (Book 2 in the Brenna Strachan Series)

Tortured Dreams (First in the Dreams & Reality Series) – Releases January 2013 (preview at the end)
Table of Contents

Foreword

A Force of Will

Faking It

Everything Changes

The Worst Date Ever

A Strutter

The Daughter

Controlled by the Clock

Three Hours, Forty-Five Minutes of Tears, Touchdowns and Testosterone

Intimacy

Ascension

Davidson Family History:

Mama's Boys?

Are We Done Yet?

Grease Monkey

A Bachelor's Life

Plausible Deniability

Wedding Bells

The First

The "C" Word

Beale Street Blues

New Orleans Allure

A Scattering of Ashes

A Happy Ending

About the Author

Preview of Tortured Dreams

Foreword

Most of the stories contained within these pages were written while I was in college. These stories revolved around two central themes. The first was the breakdown of communication within relationships. The second was the absurdity of society.

The exceptions are "The Worst Date Ever" and "Ascension". The concept for "The Worst Date Ever" came from a friend. We were talking one day and she told me I should write a comedy. Something that really appealed to the funny bone. I thought for a couple of days, I had never attempted a comedy, and came up with "The Worst Date Ever".

It's reception was more than I could have hoped. My friends who read it said it was one of my best pieces ever. A sequel was attempted, but the magic of the first one couldn't be reproduced and it was shelved.

"Ascension" is the other exception. I did write in college. However, it doesn't have a central theme as mentioned above. My creative writing professor loved it. Even encouraged me to revise it and make it a novella or a novel, the meat for either was there.

It was my feeling that it was a flashback, not a novella or novel. In the years since it was finished, I have considered making it something more. The idea is always rejected. Not because it wouldn't make a novel or novella with ease, but because I love the way it turned out.

Finally, The Davidson Family History was another experiment. Could you take a group of short stories, revolve them around the same characters and create a novel out of them? The answer was a yes, but after creating the stories listed in this section, I shelved the experiment.

Not because it didn't have merit or possibility, but because I couldn't convince myself to tell anymore about them. I had expected to have more stories about Tony, Heather, Phil, Tonya, and Asher. Unfortunately, it became a study of Sean and Anna. And after much self-debate, I decided that was exactly as it should be. The characters had run their course, so to speak.

Enjoy the tales within! Find your favorite and read it over and over again.

A Force of Will

The man sat at the table, staring down at the dark, scarred wood. He gently rubbed his hand over it, lovingly caressing some of the scars. He loved and admired the wood's ability to stay strong regardless of its hard life. Sighing, he stood up and went to the fridge. Almost barren, it contained the essentials, ham, cheese, bread, milk, orange juice and Budweiser. He fixed a sandwich and pulled out a beer.

He ate standing at the counter, not really tasting the food. The beer was the only enjoyable part. He sipped it slowly savoring the flavor. Disposing of the trash, he sat back down at the table and began his caressing again.

"It's been three months," he said out loud to no one.

The doorbell rang. He got up slowly, walking like a man twice his age and went to the door.

The door opened to his brother and his brother entered without an invitation. "Hi Will, how you doing?" His brother took a seat on the couch.

"I'm here." Will went back to the kitchen, sitting down at the kitchen table. "What's up Rick?"

Rick grudgingly joined him at the table. "Not much. The kids and Heather are good. Maggie won first place in the science fair last week. She was kind of upset that you didn't come." Maggie was the older of Rick's two kids and Will's favorite.

"Tell her I'm sorry I missed it."

"Tell her yourself. We're having a bar-be-cue this weekend and I expect you to be there."

Will stood up, "wanna beer?"

"Sure, but it's not going to get you out of the bar-be-cue."

"I don't wanna come."

"It wasn't a request."

Will handed Rick the beer and sat back down. "I'm not gonna be there. Don't wait for me."

"You will be there." Rick took a long drink from the can. "Maggie, Joanie and Heather all want you there. I want you there."

"Forget it Rick."

"I will not forget it. You're my family, Will. Family is the most important thing you got."

"What do you intend to tell your friends?"

"I don't intend to tell them anything except you're my brother."

"I don't wanna come."

"Damn it!" Rick stood up fast, knocking the chair over. "You moved here to be closer to us and we still never see you. Maggie and Joanie both want you to come to their events. They love having you around. It hasn't changed."

"It will."

"Yeah, when they're 14 and 15 and all they can think about is boys, make-up and how close they are to getting a car."

"It will change sooner than that."

"The only thing different is your opinion of yourself."

Will concentrated hard on not looking at his brother. He couldn't believe Rick didn't see the difference.

"Will, you have got to stop this. It's nonsense. You're going to kill yourself under the burden of it."

"You just don't understand."

"Yes I do, more than you think." Rick righted the chair he'd knocked over. "Come to the bar-be-cue, you'll have a good time. Maybe meet some new people. Life gets to start over for you. Most people don't get that chance."

"I'll think about." Will had no intention of going to the bar-be-cue.

"I'll pick you up on Saturday, 10 a.m. Heather wants you to be grill master. She says you cook better than I do." Rick left. Will waited until he heard the car start and pull out of the drive before getting up.

Rick had only taken a small drink from his beer. Will poured the rest down the sink. He didn't want to go to any stupid bar-be-cue. He really didn't want to face the girls. He'd let himself go lately. Walking to the mirror he examined himself. He hadn't shaved in months. The beard was coarse and shaggy. Wrinkles had formed at the corners of his eyes and furrowed his forehead. It made him look much older than 34. He felt much older than 34. His dark hair was just as unruly as his beard. It needed to be cut and combed thoroughly.

He sighed again. If Rick wasn't going to let him out of coming to the bar-be-cue. He'd have to clean himself up a bit. The calendar said it was Thursday; he only had two days to fix the damage that had been done over the last several months.

The bathroom seemed foreign to him. The whir of the electric razor brought deja-vu. The feeling overpowered him, giving him vertigo. He gripped the bathroom sink and waited for it to pass. Slowly, it subsided.

As the beard fell away, he was amazed that the person staring back looked younger. It seemed as though it had been years since he'd seen the face. The beard gone, he turned to the shower. This was the part he dreaded. He hated seeing himself nude. His mind refused to believe the body was his. It screamed against being locked inside it.

He'd cut down on the number of baths he took, because it was a reminder of who he'd once been and what he now was. The doctor's were good at fixing what was broke, but they hadn't done anything for his mental health. The clothes peeled away slowly, prolonging the dreaded moment. He sat down on the toilet, untied one shoe and set it down. He didn't bother with the other. He pushed the jeans down below his knees and unfastened the leg. It made a small popping noise. He finished removing the clothes and stood up. Hopping towards the bathtub, he caught sight of himself in the mirror. The scars dribbled down his chest and disappeared somewhere below the mirror.

Exiting the shower, he called Rick.

"I'm not coming." He said as his brother got on the phone.

"You are coming. You haven't left the house in three months."

"I don't want to."

"I don't care. You are coming. Heather and I bring you all your groceries and necessities. We mow your lawn, hire people to do the outside work, and make sure the maid doesn't accidentally walk into a room where you are. Hell, you won't even let your nieces come see you, Will. You are coming to this bar-be-cue, even if I have to come drag your ass out in chains."

"Why?"

"Because we love you. After the car accident, you told us you wanted to come live near us. You wanted to be closer to your nieces, closer to the things you were missing out on. You're here and no one ever sees you. You might as well still be in Scotland."

"Tennessee isn't what I thought it would be."

"How would you know? You don't leave your house long enough to find out what Tennessee is like." Rick sat quietly for a moment. "Maggie wants to talk to you."

"No, Rick." Will tried to protest, but Maggie was already on the phone.

"Uncle Will?" She asked quietly.

"Hi honey, how are you?" Will struggled to keep his voice light.

"Pretty good. Dad says you're coming to the bar-be-cue this weekend."

"I'm thinking about it," Will lied.

"I really hope you come. I want to show you my horse." She paused for a moment. "Oh and I have some friends coming and I want to introduce you. I've told them all about you. How you've traveled the world and lived overseas and everything. Why haven't I seen you since you moved to Tennessee?"

"I've been busy. Maggie, I may be busy on Saturday. If I am, I want you to know I love you."

"You're not coming." Maggie didn't sound surprised.

"I don't know yet."

He could hear her breathing on the other end of the phone. "Dad says that you've been through a lot since the accident and that we just need to give you some time to adjust."

"I need to go." Will hung up the phone. He sat at the scarred table and cried. This was not the way life was supposed to be. He'd taught Maggie to ride a horse, now he wasn't sure he could get up on one.

He'd been an athlete in college and now he couldn't bear to look at himself. Couldn't bare for others to look at him. He knew he'd missed something. Some part of his life that he couldn't replace. Maggie's science fair was just the beginning. He wondered how many ballet recitals Joanie had been in that he hadn't attended. And Joanie had turned 10 years old last month. He'd missed the party. He'd gotten her a gift but he hadn't seen her face when she opened the present. Maggie was going to turn 12 in a couple of months. Even his own birthday had been passed over without a thought. It'd been a while since he saw a movie in a theatre or even rented one. He sat locked inside his house, vegetating in front of the television, hoping no one saw him. Hoping the world would forget about him. Hoping he would forget about himself.

For a moment, he felt empty. Then the anger he'd been fighting with swelled up, over taking him. The chair banged against the floor as he stood up. "I hate you!" He screamed. Taking firm hold on the bottom of the table he jerked upward. The mahogany table teetered on two legs then crashed down. The shattering of the wood was loud in the silent house. Echoing like a shotgun blast.

Standing up, he ran from the room. He slammed the door and fell onto his bed. The tears came in great wracking sobs that shook his entire body.

In the morning he felt a little different. The anger had lessened. The pain didn't cut as deep. For the first time in months, breathing wasn't an effort.

He walked to his bookcases in his den. He hadn't read a book since the accident. Scanning the shelves, he picked an old favorite. A comedy by Neil Gaimen and Terry Pratchett. Sitting on the leather sofa, he spent all Friday enjoying the book. At the funny parts he even laughed out loud.

Saturday morning sprang upon him. He'd only slept about three hours. Once he'd started reading, he just couldn't put it down. He'd read until he'd finished the book.

Quickly, he went through his morning necessities. Shower, shave, brushing his teeth, he kept checking the clock. He'd decided to surprise his family. Surprise the people he loved and who loved him. By 8 a.m. he was ready to go. If he hurried, he could be there in time for breakfast. Rick's family always ate late on the weekends.

Cautiously, he entered the truck. He hadn't driven for a while. There was a moment when he worried the beat up old thing wouldn't start. But the engine caught on the second try. If he was really going to have a life, he'd have to buy a new car, he thought briefly. He drove to his brother's home.

There was a moment of hesitation as he pulled into the driveway. He considered running away. He didn't want the girls to see the limp. Didn't want them to notice that he couldn't pick them up anymore. Killing the engine, he opened the door.

Maggie stepped onto the front walk. She'd heard the truck and come out to see who it belonged to.

"Uncle Will!" She ran to meet him. Throwing her arms around him, she put her head against his stomach.

"You came." Rick said as he stepped onto the porch.

"I came." Will responded, his hand on Maggie's hair.

"You're just in time for breakfast."

"I thought if I hurried, I might be."

"Come on," Maggie grabbed his hand and tugged him towards the house. "After breakfast, I'll show you my horse."

Will looked at Maggie. She'd grown taller since he'd seen her last. "My lord, Mags, you're almost as tall as your mother now. Are you sure you're only eleven?" He teased.

Maggie smiled and Will followed her into the house.

Faking It

David sat behind his desk, staring at the client across from him. Gina was in her mid-thirties and had amassed a nice portfolio of stocks and bonds. David saw her about once a month, when she came in to adjust things. She was very hands on about her finances.

"How was your vacation?" David asked, typing things into the computer and smiling.

"Oh, it was grea..." Gina stopped talking, "it sucked." She added after a moment of hesitation.

"You didn't like New York?"

"I didn't see New York, not really. I flaked out once I got there. I spent five days in New York and didn't see a damn thing until the fifth day."

"Huh?" David looked at her again.

"I mean, I checked into my hotel, hit a used bookstore a couple of blocks away and then spent the following three days in my room, reading. I didn't even go out for food, preferring room service. It was a complete waste of time." Gina sighed. "The last full day I realized I didn't have souvenirs for anyone so I dashed around the city trying to collect them."

"Let me see if I understand this, you didn't leave your room for four days, the final day you did everything?"

"No, not exactly. I spent four days in my hotel room, reading. The fifth day, my last full day in the city, I panicked and started going places. I went to The Met, Museum of Natural History, Guggenheim, Museum of Sex, and the Central Park Zoo. The only things I saw in these places were the exhibits on the way to the gift shop and the merchandise they were selling. I bought souvenirs for everyone on my list, including myself and I didn't really see or do anything in New York. I got some great pictures, but they were all from the Central Park area and my hotel. I told everyone I was so busy with those, that I didn't make it outside of that little area."

"How did you manage to get to all those places in one day?"

"They were close together, relatively speaking, and close to my hotel."

"What about giving descriptions of what you saw?"

"Souvenir brochures and booklets. I bought one at every place I supposedly went. Read them on the flight home and managed to convince everyone that I'd been there. I don't know why I'm telling you this."

David shook his head. Faking a vacation was a completely new idea, one that seemed preposterous. Why would anyone fake a vacation? Why would someone decide to fly all the way across the country to sit in a hotel room for four days doing nothing? He couldn't even begin to imagine what she was thinking.

"Because sometimes it's nice to talk to someone who doesn't have much invested in your life. That's why people tell their life stories to complete strangers." David shook his head again. "I think I've got it all transferred."

"Good see you later." She stood up and walked from the room.

Even after she had closed the door, David continued to stare at her empty chair. It was a strange thing to do, even stranger to confess. He wondered what people would think if they knew. It made him wonder how often people faked things to make it through the day.

Everything Changes

The news wasn't all bad. There had been some good stuff scattered through. Words like "genetic disorder", "sterility" and "immunodeficiency" kept floating through her mind. Kids had never been in the picture, she was actually kind of happy about the sterility part. It was the immune deficiency that bugged her. The doctors couldn't tell her how long it would take to heal from the last round of surgery. The two almost vampiric holes should have healed pretty quickly, instead they'd gotten infected. At least she knew the reason now.

She tossed her keys on the stand by the door, as she entered the house. Brian, her fiancé, was sitting in the living room. "You're home early," she kissed him lightly on the forehead.

"I was anxious to see what the doctors found out," he replied, staring at her. She plopped down on the couch next to him. Brian turned his body to look at her.

"I have a genetic disorder, it causes some trouble with infertility, immunodeficiency, higher risk for diabetes and cancer, and a few other minor problems" she was staring at the floor as she spoke.

Brian got very quiet and still next to her. "Does this disorder have a name?" He asked after several silent moments.

"Polycystic ovarian syndrome or PCOS for short," It wasn't in her nature to get worked up over these types of things. It was just something that happened, nothing to be done about it.

Brian sat for a while longer, looking lost in his thoughts. "They're sure about this? They are sure about the effects of it?" Something sounded strange in his voice. Finally, she looked at him.

"Yeah, they're sure. I've had some of the symptoms for years. Migraines, ovarian cysts, and hypoglycemia have been present for ages. They just never caught it before because my mother doesn't have it. Usually it's passed from mother to daughter, in my case; it was probably from my father's side."

"Is there anything that can be done?" He asked, barely whispering.

"Not really, they can treat the side effects, but not the disorder." She paused, "why, what's bothering you?"

Brian shook his head, "I guess I was just planning on children," he muttered. The shock of the sentence echoed through her head.

"You're kidding, right?" The surprise and confusion showed on her face.

"No, I'm not," he stood up. "There is no way to beat the infertility?"

She stood up across from him. "In-vitro and things might beat it, but it's a long shot." She looked at him, "but I don't want to go through that stuff. I mean, we agreed five years ago that kids were not in our future, Brian."

Brian sighed, "things change, people change."

Her mouth fell open, "how can you stand there and talk about wanting children?" She shook her head, "you can't even perform the necessary physical functions for reproduction."

Brian's faced turned red and he balled his hands into fists. "You knew that coming into this relationship."

"Yeah, it's been five years and I have never bitched even once about it. I think it's about time I did," yelling at him. "Five years we've been together and we have not had sex the entire time, because you can't get it up." She had crossed an invisible line and decided that she would leave nothing unsaid.

"It's the drugs," he said between clenched teeth.

"I understand the steroids are necessary because of the transplant. I agree the steroids are much more important than our sex life, that's why I haven't complained. What I don't understand is how you can stand there and tell me that you want kids and yet you can't perform the necessary act to create them." As she stood there glaring at him, the really important question finally surfaced.

What am I fighting for? Her mind tried to grasp some kind of answer. The answer came screaming into her mind making her sick to her stomach. It was her fear of being alone. Until now, she had always considered herself strong and independent.

"Someone will be over to pack my stuff tomorrow," she whirled around and headed for the door.

"You can keep the house," he said quietly.

"I don't want it," she walked out the front door. In a couple of months, she'd forget about him, his memory would fade. She smiled, he'd never forget her, it was her kidney.

The Worst Date Ever

Finally, she was going to do it. She'd waited almost a year for him to become available, a very very long year. Now he was single and bringing over wine to go with her dinner. Krista checked her reflection in the mirror one last time, adjusting the long teardrop earrings so that they sparkled when the light caught them. She ran to the bathroom. Her hair was standing up in one spot, one very noticeable spot. It reminded her of Alfalfa from the "Little Rascals". She dug under the sink, looking for her extra strength hairspray.

Three minutes later, she still hadn't found the hairspray, but had found an ancient aluminum styling case decorated with a billion stickers. Frustrated, Krista tossed the case back under the sink and was satisfied to hear it thud against the sink pipe. She stood up and settled on water. Carefully, she dabbed water on the errant hairs, forcing them down. They popped back up. She stomped her foot hard against the floor, breaking the heel on her high-heeled strappy sandals. Cursing, she stooped down and grabbed the heel. That's when she noticed the can of Aqua Net on the floor next to the toilet.

She sprayed her hair into place while dashing to the closet to replace the stupid broken shoe. The doorbell rang as she buckled the last strap into place. She smoothed her slacks down and went to the door.

Krista unlocked the dead bolt and with a flourish yanked open the door. The door hit the extent of its chain and slammed back. She heard it connect with something, then Mitya cursed and something glass crashed on the hall floor.

"Oh god," she mumbled, removing the chain and opening the door.

Mitya stood, well sort of stood, on the other side. He was holding his face, particularly his nose. He was half stooped, blood dripping between his fingers.

"I fink est brooken." He muttered to her.

"Oh god, come in." Krista grabbed his arm, jerking him into the apartment. "Have a seat, I'll get you some ice."

Carefully she filled a bag with ice and wrapped it in a hand towel. She also grabbed the roll of paper towels and rushed to him. This was not going as planned. She was supposed to feed him and then seduce him, not send him rushing to the emergency room with a broken nose.

Mitya took the ice and paper towels. He held the ice to his nose. The bleeding was slowing.

"I think you're burning dinner." He said to Krista as the pan on the stove boiled over.

"Oh shit!" Krista rushed into the kitchen. It wasn't burnt, just very done. She placed the pan on the counter and turned to look at him. "I'm sorry, if you don't want to stay for dinner, I understand. I can take you to the hospital if you want."

"No, it's ok. It's almost stopped. I don't think it's broken after all." Gingerly he removed the ice pack and touched it. It was sore, but he'd gotten worse from playing soccer. It would be all right.

"If you're sure." Krista's heart was doing cartwheels in her chest. She couldn't believe he was going to stay. "I fixed Broiled Oysters for dinner."

"Um, I'm allergic to shell fish."

"Oh, I didn't know." Krista thought for a moment. "No matter, we'll just order something and have it delivered."

"Pizza?" He asked sounding hopeful. Pizza was the last thing on Krista's mind. It wasn't very romantic and oysters were supposed to be an aphrodisiac, that's why she had fixed them. She didn't even really like oysters all that much.

"Yeah, that's fine." She smiled at him but wanted to pull her hair out. Nothing was going right. "Are you sure you don't want to do this another time?" She half hoped that he would say yes.

"Hey, don't worry about my nose. It's big and gets in the way." He joked. When it wasn't swollen and angry red, Krista thought his nose was pretty cute. "Look, why don't you order the pizza and I'll go clean up the glass from the hall."

"Ok," Krista grabbed the phone book. She had no idea what kind of pizza to order or where to order it from. Finally, she settled for a chain restaurant and ordered a large with everything. This would allow them both to pick off the stuff they don't like while getting the stuff they do like. She thought it was a pretty good idea.

Mitya came back in, the remains of the bottle carefully wrapped in the worthless hand towel. He tossed all of it into the trashcan and joined her in the living room. Krista searched for something to say but couldn't come up with anything.

"Want to watch a movie? I rented the new Samuel L. Jackson movie." She offered.

"Yeah, I haven't seen that yet." He moved next to her on the couch.

Krista grabbed the box off the table. Her DVD player had broken the week before. She was stuck watching everything on VHS. The movie had just started when there was another knock on the door.

"I'll get the pizza." She sprung from the couch, grabbing her wallet.

"Don't injure him; he might not be as nice about it." Mitya called after her.

"Ha ha," she replied moving into the tiny alcove that separated the living room from the entry way. After she had paid for the pizza she stood for a moment with her head against the door. She couldn't believe her bad luck tonight. Surely, pizza would make it all better. They could eat, have a beer and then... well she wasn't sure what would happen then. Better not to think about it.

"Hey Krista, where'd you get this movie?" He yelled to her.

"I rented it down the street." Great, now the tape's going to break, she thought, stifling a groan. She walked into the living room and only great reflexes kept her from dropping the box.

On the screen were two very busty women and both were very naked except leather chaps. They took turns kissing each other and a man that was still fully dressed. The man was obviously not Samuel L. Jackson. To her horror, the man didn't stay dressed for more than a couple of seconds. Suddenly, he too was left wearing only chaps.

"Maybe you should get a refund." Mitya shrugged, taking the box from her. "Wow, wonder how he got them in that position." He took a slice of pizza from the box and sat back down on her couch, cocking his head to one side.

Krista had no choice; she sat down next to him and took a slice of pizza. Suddenly the prospect of getting Mitya in her bed seemed impossible. There was no way he was going to stay after this. They ate in complete silence, both of them glued to the TV as the three found new things to do to each other. Mitya turned to look at her.

"Do you really want to sit here, eating pizza and watching porn?" He asked.

Krista gave a very weak smile and closed her eyes. This was a complete disaster. She had no answer. One of the women gave a shriek.

Mitya kissed her. It caught her completely off guard and she jerked from him. The moment she did it, she wished she hadn't.

"Sorry, I didn't..." Mitya stood up.

"No, it just surprised me." Krista stood up too. She took the remote and flipped off the TV. Mitya raised an eyebrow at her.

"Kiss me again." Krista couldn't believe it. He had kissed her! She didn't know whether to faint or jump for joy, but felt like both were options.

Mitya hooked his arm around her, pulling her to him. The kiss was long, deep, passionate. It left her knees weak. Eventually, she pulled away and began unbutton his shirt, kissing each section of newly exposed flesh. Then she couldn't move.

"Krista?" Mitya asked, he started to step back.

"No!" Krista screamed, "don't move, my earring is stuck on one of your buttons."

"Do you need help?" Mitya gave a slight chuckle. He finished unbuttoning his shirt and gently slid out of it, making sure to keep it still in the front. When he'd gotten out of it, he began untangling her earring.

"This is such a disaster," Krista muttered.

"Nah, there's still hope for it. See?" Mitya let his shirt fall to the floor. "Why don't you take those off before you get them hung again."

Krista took the stupid dangly earrings out and tossed them on the table. One slid off onto the floor. Mitya bent down to grab it.

"Don't, just leave it. It'll be fine there." She began kissing his chest again. Enjoying the feel of the light sprinkling of hair he had. With a quick flourish, he pulled her blouse up over her head and tossed it somewhere behind him. She knelt down, untying his shoe laces. He smiled as he kicked out of them. They landed somewhere near the dining room.

Next he began undoing his jeans, the button gave way easily. As he pulled the zipper down, it hung. He jerked on it a few times, without any success.

"It's stuck." He nearly yelled. Mitya couldn't believe his luck. Krista stared at him.

"You're kidding, right?"

"No, it's really stuck. Want to give me a hand?"

As Krista knelt down, the power in her apartment went out for a few seconds. She fumbled in the dark.

"I have candles," she said, this might work for the better. She busied herself with lighting candles in all the rooms as Mitya continued to jerk on his zipper. Krista returned in time to hear the ripping of fabric as the seams around the zipper gave way. Mitya let them fall to the floor as the lights came back on.

The jeans had pooled on the floor revealing black boxers with smiley faces on them. Krista stifled a giggle, as the song "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" ran through her head. They looked ridiculous. Krista removed the smiling faces.

"Sit down on the couch," she whispered. Mitya did as he was told. The TV blared to life.

"...tion is a sin. But one that you can be forgiven for, but sex with..." The Evangelist on TV screamed at them. The power outage had tripped something in the TV, causing the volume to go up. Mitya dug under himself until he found the remote and flipped it off. They both just sat for a moment, reveling in the silence. Krista noticed that somehow he was still excited. She was beginning to have second thoughts about this entire thing.

"Bedroom," he nearly growled at her. When she didn't immediately respond, he kissed her. Then nimbly picked her up and carried her into the bedroom. Mitya gently tossed her on the bed and began work on removing her sandals.

Krista lay back on the bed, letting his hands caress her legs as the first sandal came free. He tossed it in the general direction of the bathroom. Mitya cursed, then the second sandal gave a dull pop as it came free. Krista was pretty sure something had broken. That was two pairs of shoes that had gotten ruined this evening. She tried very hard not to care.

His hands found his way to her waistband. It took him only a second to undo the button and pull them down off her hips. Her panties immediately followed, his fingers working deftly to remove the clingy material as she struggled from her bra.

"Wait." Mitya stopped and moved away from her for a moment. "I think I hear water running."

Krista listened for a moment, she didn't hear anything. "Must be the neighbors showering," she replied pulling him back to her. She flipped him over on his back and took top. She reached into the top drawer of the nightstand, producing a pair of handcuffs.

"And what do you intend to do with those?" He asked.

"There's a reason the headboard has bars," she smiled at him. She cuffed his hands above his head, wrapping the chain through the bars. He was secured.

Gently she took a condom from the same drawer and slid it down over his excited member. Krista lowered herself onto him. Finally, she was there. Finally, Mitya was in her bed and at her complete mercy. The thought excited her. She moved faster on him, listening to his breathing increase, become shallower. The headboard began hitting the wall. Her neighbors would probably complain tomorrow, but she didn't care.

Mitya moaned her name. She moved faster. The framed poster of Till Lindeman mounted over the bed fell, striking her on the head. She pitched forward, falling on Mitya, head butting him. His glasses slipped from his face. Krista rubbed the spot on her head.

"Ok, don't panic, but I can't see and I think something is on fire." Mitya said, trying to sound calm.

Krista tossed the frame from her body and looked over at the end table. Sure enough, a book was on fire. A candle had fallen on it.

"Ahhh!" Krista climbed from the bed, grabbed a pillow and began beating at the flames. The pillow caught fire. The smoke detector began screaming. She ran to the bathroom, slipped on the floor. When she'd managed to regain her footing she threw the flaming pillow into the tub and turned on the water. In the distance she could hear sirens.

"Uh, Krista, could you uncuff me?" Mitya called from the other room.

Krista turned, lost her footing again and slipped on the wet bathroom floor. She couldn't imagine why the floor was wet. She crawled out of the bathroom and to the nightstand. Her bedroom had a funny wet smoke smell to it. It stung her nostrils.

The key wasn't there. She was sure the key had been right there. The book was now a charred ruin. The lamp shade was starting to look the same. She wondered how long it would take to put it out. The front door of her apartment crashed open. Within seconds, five people in full fire-fighter gear stood staring at her.

"Ma'am we need to evacuate the building." One of them said as another grabbed the fire extinguisher next to the bed and started spraying the fire.

"Um, yeah," Krista stood up. There was a loud cracking crumbling sound and the bathroom seemed to collapse. Water sprayed from the damaged lines all the way to her bedroom carpet. She was willing to bet she wouldn't get her security deposit back.

"Krista, the key." Mitya sounded pretty desperate.

"The key was right here." Krista turned towards the nightstand. It was covered in foam. There was no way she was going to find it now.

"Get a saw," one of the firemen said. "And some blankets." He seemed to be the guy in charge.

"Ma'am, we'll get your boyfriend, but you need to leave now." Krista let him lead her out of the room. Someone wrapped a blanket around her. They scurried her outside wrapped in a blanket. A few moments later, Mitya was also escorted out. A police officer managed to remove the cuffs with a key without laughing. His glasses were still missing though. He stood next to her and leaned in.

"You did put a condom on, right?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Because it's missing," he whispered.

"Maybe it fell off when they were cutting you out."

"I think it came off when you went to put out the fire." Mitya made a strange noise.

Krista thought about it for a moment. The light came on slowly inside her head.

"My apartment is ruined, I've been embarrassed almost to the point of death and now I have to go find a missing condom."

"Yeah, that's about the size of it." Mitya pulled her into his blanket. "What are you doing tomorrow night? I have an apartment we can trash."

A Strutter

"Strutted" was the only real way to call the way he walked. Either due to the heels on his boots or the pants being too tight in the legs, he strutted like a model on a runway. The boots had three inch heels, carefully tailored so that they went unnoticed. Without them, he was 6'1" and hated it. For Jake, the ideal height was 6'4" and the boots made that possible.

The pants were also custom tailored. He had good calves and men's pants tended to be straight legged. He had someone who took in the material, making them tighter. Showing his calves to his satisfaction. Of course, this also meant that the entire pants had be altered, otherwise they looked stupid.

His friend noticed him enter the restaurant and flagged him over. They sat and ate lunch, catching up on old times. They talked for an hour and a half before Jake announced it was time he got a move on.

"What's your hurry?" His friend asked.

"I have a stylist appointment in 30 minutes."

"Why? You don't look like you need a haircut."

"No, I had my hair cut last week." Jake fiddled with his glasses for a moment. They were gold, wire-framed glasses with ultra-thin lenses.

"Then why are you going to the stylist?"

Jake didn't look at him. He was sure his friend would laugh, but the friend kept pushing. Finally, Jake gave in.

"I get my body waxed. It's the only way to keep the hair from taking over." He whispered.

"Do what?" His friend frowned.

Jake sighed, "my back and chest has to be waxed. I like to look good and I can't if I look and feel like a gorilla." Jake stood.

"You're serious?"

"Yes, I'm serious." Tossing his napkin on the table, Jake strutted from the restaurant. His friend sat, too stunned to laugh.

The Daughter

His hands shook, his stomach filled with butterflies. The plane ride had soothed him, calmed him. Now, parked two houses down, it was all he could do to remember breathing.

Mentally, he rolled back the years. He had been young, only in his 20s when his wife of three years had run off. She couldn't live as the wife of a starving musician.

Those had been the early years. The years when he had struggled for gigs, struggled to make enough money to pay all the bills and buy groceries. Thinking back, he was amazed at how far he had come.

She had left one night, while he'd been on stage. The bar had been smoke-filled and smelled of stale cigarettes, alcohol and urine. They had made a little money that night, but not much. Just enough to get groceries for another couple of days.

At first, he thought they'd been robbed. Stuff had been thrown all over the place and things were missing. Then he'd seen the note. She had tacked it on the fridge. She had fallen in love with another.

The year that followed her departure had seen him cast into desolation. He found comfort only in the bottom of a bottle or the arms of some barroom groupie. Both left him feeling sick the following morning. He considered suicide a couple of times, the thought was there, tucked into the back of his mind.

He moved into a crappy apartment in the city. Him and his drummer shared the cramped one room hell-hole. They spent their evenings high, writing songs and comparing battle wounds. The music business was harder than they had thought.

Then it had come. The divorce was finalized in the early morning on a bright day. He'd felt like shit. Hung-over and wanting it to be done and over with, he'd nearly crawled into lawyer's office. Signed without reading them, he didn't care if she took everything. Which she did. That had been the last time he had seen or heard from her for sixteen years.

That had also been the beginning. His life was spiraling out of control and he felt impotent, unable to stop it. Three days after the divorce, they had a gig. Another bar that smelled of stale cigarettes and alcohol. Another night where he contemplated killing himself and being done with it.

He hadn't, instead he'd played his best set ever. Somewhere hidden in the gloom had been a face. A face that had plastered the cover of every music magazine for the last several years. That face belonged to the greatest thing since... well, everything. At least, that's what people said.

In the dark though, he hadn't seen that face. He'd seen only the people standing next to the stage. Only the bartenders serving up drinks and a crowd near the back. The crowd had annoyed him. He couldn't imagine why they were standing back there. Was he really that bad?

After the set, the band tore down, taking their equipment out to their beaten up cars. Piling it in where ever it would fit. They didn't even rank roadies.

That face had suddenly appeared. The guy had needlessly introduced himself and the band stood dumbstruck as he asked for one of their CDs before handing them his card.

The memories faded. Since then, he had become the greatest thing since... well, everything. It hadn't been easy, but he had done it. He'd made millions off his albums, T-shirts, tours and anything else they could slap the band name on. He returned his attention to the house. Inside was his ex-wife and her fiancé. Why had she called.

Determined to find out, he parked the car in front of the two-story home. A slightly unkempt yard was dwarfed by the house. It wasn't a cookie-cuttered house in the suburbs, but an older model that needed some work. For a split second, he was struck with a pang of guilt. He had sent her money once, shortly after making it, but she hadn't responded and he hadn't thought to send her any more.

His hands were still trembling as he rang the doorbell. A tallish girl, with brown hair and blue eyes opened the door. For a second she was silent and then she let out a squeal.

"Mom, mom!" She stepped back from the door. "You will never believe who is standing on our porch!"

"What are you going on about?" Her mother came to the door.

"Oh, it's you." She didn't seem pleased to see him.

"Mom, do you realize that this is the lead singer for..."

"I know exactly who he is," her mother interrupted her. "Come on in Aaron."

His ex-wife held the door for him. Aaron followed her into the overly warm living room. The furnishings were tasteful, but nothing extravagant. For a fleeting moment, he wondered if she thought about what she had missed out on.

"Hannah, go upstairs and check on your sister. You'll have plenty of time to talk to Aaron, but I need to talk to him first."

Hannah, nearly bounced up the stairs. She was digging a cell phone out of her pocket before she reached the top. Aaron smiled, slightly amazed that he could still send teen girls into hysteria. He was almost forty.

"Lilly," Aaron stopped, unsure what to say.

"No, don't say anything, this is hard enough for me. I'm glad you finally got that break. I'm also glad you cleaned up a few years ago."

"Well..." Aaron chewed his lower lip.

"I need you to do something for me. Greg was offered a job in Australia. We move at the end of the school year." Lilly sighed heavily. "I can't believe I'm doing this."

"Doing what?" Aaron asked her.

"This!" Lilly nearly yelled, then stopped. "Hannah and Greg are having problems. Serious problems. Add that to the stress of the wedding and the move and I don't think I can take any more of it."

"I'm not following you," Aaron frowned.

"I want Hannah to spend the summer with you."

"Wait, wait, wait. I'm obviously missing something. Why am I taking your daughter for the summer."

"Because she's also your daughter." Lilly put her head in her hands. "I didn't know how to tell you. I've never known how to tell you."

"I haven't heard from you in sixteen years and now you're telling me I have a daughter?" He sat down in a chair. His knees suddenly felt weak.

Controlled by the Clock

The alarm clock is blaring, meaning it is once again six a.m. I roll over and shut it off. The list of things I have to do today is long. First though, I have to convince myself to wake up. Slowly, the seconds tick by. My eyes are open, my brain still foggy, still wanting to sleep. Finally, I force my feet from the bed, then my legs. Sitting up now, I check the clock. 6:02 a.m., not bad, only took me two minutes to convince myself that it really is morning and time to get up.

The kitchen is still messy from last night's dinner. I'll have to clean that up. It can wait. Breakfast first. My two nephews run down the stairs. Ah, to be young again and have that kind of energy. They shout their breakfast requests as they skid through the dining room, both racing for the downstairs bathroom. They won't use the one upstairs, they insist it is haunted.

Bacon goes into one pan. Eggs into the other. Water is put on to boil. My mother now appears from the bathroom. She looks put together. A look at the coffee pot says that she had another early morning.

"Morning dear," she walks past me into the dining room.

"Hi mom," I concentrate on the food. If I get it wrong, the boys won't eat it and I'll be forced to start over. There's only one hour though to get this right and get ready to go to school.

The eggs finish as the first boy, the oldest, comes out of the bathroom. He plops down and within moments, his breakfast is down. He gets up and disappears up the stairs again.

The youngest one comes out next. He wolfs down the bacon and the eggs, leaving nothing. I shuffle back to my room. I forgot to do laundry yesterday. I'm running low on clothing. I settle for a slightly worn t-shirt and add laundry to my list of things to do. The clock continues to tick away the minutes. I'm down to ten.

Clothes go on quickly. Hair gets a rough brushing. Teeth get an even rougher brushing. The boys are dressed. Their backpacks slung over their shoulders. I grab my car keys and out we go.

The oldest goes to junior high, he's a freshman. He also gets dropped off first, insisting that he likes being early because he can work out. Helps him build himself up for football. He's already been accepted to the high school team in our town. I expect big things of him.

The youngest is next. He is still in middle school. His middle school is on the other side of town. It takes us twenty minutes to make the drive. He climbs out muttering about how much he dislikes school. Time to go back home.

Mom is gone by the time I arrive. Her day has begun just as mine has. However, hers consists of an office building and a cube farm. I don't envy that, but it'd be nice to have a stable, steady income.

I look at my "to do" list. Dishes need to be loaded in the dishwasher. The carpets need to be vacuumed. My laundry needs to be done. Meals need to be planned out. Groceries need to be bought. Laundry first though. I don't bother to separate anything but the dark clothes. My wardrobe consists mostly of band t-shirts and jeans. I like it that way. I do own dress clothes for those occasions when I have to have them, but those occasions are getting further and further apart.

I start the washer and toss in my jeans and whatever else I happened to grab. One thing started, but I have more than one load to do today. Where to next? My laptop.

I boot it up, type in my password and wait for it to connect to the wireless router we run. It doesn't take long, but it seems like an eternity. The laptop is finally ready to run, internet has been connected. The clock says its three minutes until eight. Email gets checked, a handful of spam messages gets deleted first. Two mailing list emails are opened first. One is music related, the other has to do with a sale Barnes & Noble. I read and delete them. Email from friends and family are next. I read them and reply. Then I fire off an email to my best friend about how irritating my significant other can be. He is so determined to keep all his feelings and emotions bottled up inside of him. I feel better after the rant.

The clock says it's now 8:31. My laundry needs to be transferred. I do that first. Next, the dishes. I pre-rinse everything that looks like it could be problematic. There are too many dishes to get them all in the dishwasher though. I make a mental note to do two loads today and wonder how two boys can dirty up so many dishes in one day.

Back to my laptop. Check the calendar. The oldest needs a doctor's appointment for some strange bruise and rash on his foot. I dig out my cell phone and make the call. It's scheduled for tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. That will irritate him, he hates to miss school.

Check email again. Three new messages. I read them quickly. An invite to a movie over the weekend. A message from my friend in California complaining about his work. A reply from my best friend about Mark's macho posturing. I reply to it, one line only: "he's such a guy."

The clock tells me that it's now just after nine a.m. My day is slipping away quicker than I want. There is still a lot to do on my list. I check the dryer, still not dry, but the next load of laundry is ready to go into the dryer when it gets done.

With the laptop still open, I rearrange some things. I pay bills next. Thank god for online bill pay. Car insurance, house insurance and electric bills get paid today, I print every confirmation page. Another 15 minutes is gone.

My cell phone rings. It's my business partner. We have a thirty minute conversation. I hang up and remember the clothes in the dryer. They are done. I pull them out and toss them into a basket. Transfer the clothes from the washer to the dryer and start both again. Into the bedroom again, grab another load of laundry and toss it into the washer.

The basket of clean clothes glares at me from the living room floor. I hate to fold clothes. I sigh and settle into it. With the clothes folded, I put them back into the basket and head back to the bedroom. I put them away in their designated location. Break time.

A can of coke is my breakfast. I sip it and check email again. Four new messages. Two from my best friend. I read them, click the links and read the news stories associated with them before responding. The next one is in regards to Mark and his hobbies. Not sure how I became the website guru for that, but there you have it. The last one is spam. I delete it without opening it and add the new website detail to my list of things to do.

Break over, time to do something else. The dishwasher has finished. I unload the dishes and get the next one loaded. I decide to run it regardless of the fact that it's not entirely full. Tomorrow, I'll have more to do.

Sit down and check the clock again. It's almost 11 a.m. I still haven't gotten through the first third of my "to do" list. I re-prioritize the list. Meals now so that I can grocery shop later. The boys are so picky, it's hard to plan out their meals. I do the best I can and then check the kitchen for supplies. Supplies checked, I now know what I need from the store as well.

The clock says it's almost noon. I need to have lunch. My stomach has started to growl. Food sounds good. I recheck the kitchen, find what I want and start it cooking. As it cooks, I take the clothes out of the dryer and put the clothes from the washer into it. My laundry is almost done. I go into the other downstairs bathroom and pull out the boys clothing. Like dishes, they go through a lot of them in a day.

Their clothing gets sorted, as does my mother's. Everything piled up where it belongs, I check the food. Almost done. I go back and toss in a new load of laundry. I watch the basket fill with water for a couple of minutes, my mind blank.

The timer on the stove shakes me from the fog and brings me back to the tasks at hand. I eat lunch then hand wash the dishes.

The clock reminds me that it is now one p.m. I fold the laundry, take the clothes from the dryer tossing them into the basket. I take the clothes from the washer and toss them into the dryer. I load the last batch of dirty laundry.

I'm slowing down some. I'm tired and bored. The clean clothes sit in the basket for a couple of minutes while I check email again. New messages. All of them are advertisements. I remember that Mark has a cold. I should call him later this evening to check on how he's feeling. I add that to my list of things "to do."

The laundry refuses to fold itself, so I break down and fold them. They sit in the basket a little while after they have been folded. I have an half an hour to get that task done. I open up a game. Two rounds of Team Skip-Bo later and I finally put up the laundry.

The clothes in the dryer aren't done yet, but they are getting close. I give up waiting for them and go to the store. Grocery shopping goes without a hitch. I have a list and a mental floor plan of the store. Cart full, I check out, talk to the woman at the register about the weather for a moment and head out to my SUV. I load the groceries in and check the time.

Fifteen minutes until three. I head to the youngest nephew's school. I get there as classes are dismissed. He finds the car, complains about the day all the way home. I listen without adding any information. The radio gives us light background music.

Once home, we unload and put away the groceries. I take the clothes out of the dryer. I send him to fold them and put them away. I move the last load into the wash machine.

It's almost 4:30 p.m. when I start dinner. Mom picks up the oldest boy on her way home from work. Dinner gets done as they walk through the door. We sit down, eat dinner. The boys finish and head out to play or do whatever it is boys do in the evening.

I unload the dishwasher and load it back. Mom folds the last basket of clothes for me. I sit down, check email again. My "to do" list is about half done now. I read the new email messages, reply to a few and close the laptop.

Seven p.m., the TV comes on. My favorite show is on tonight. For an hour I sit glued to the TV. The show ends. I head to my room.

The clock tells me that it's eight p.m. now. There are still six things left on my "to do" list. I get out my supplies and sit at the desk. However, before I can get wrapped up in that I need to call Mark.

He answers on the third ring. I ask how he's feeling, he says terrible. I apologize. He asks about my day, I say it was busy. We both say goodbye. The entire exchange takes five minutes. I return to the desk. My supplies are spread out on it, but I need to make a change to the website for Mark. I do that first.

Website changed, I look at the list. There are still four items on it. One involves my own website. I do it next. It takes longer than expected, but it gets done. There are three items left. I call my business partner; let her know that it's been updated. Two things left. I sit back down at the desk.

Its eleven-thirty p.m. when I look up at the clock again. I have made some more merchandise. I need to photograph it and put it in the online store. One item left on my list.

I bring the laptop back out. Open email, check the new messages. It's a quarter to twelve now. I don't reply to any. I open the "task list" function. That one item glares out at me. I sigh, rub my hands across my face and begin the task list for tomorrow. When I finish it, I take that last item from today's list and move it to first thing tomorrow morning.

The alarm is blaring again. I sigh and climb from the bed. It's six a.m. again. It's also Friday. I boot my laptop and print today's "to do" list. The first item brings a grin to my face. I get up, go to the kitchen and start breakfast. The day begins again. Everyone gets off to school and I look at my list again. I need to do dishes, vacuum the floors, clean the bathrooms, meet with my business partner, and finish everything by 6 p.m. so that I can go out with Mark tonight.

That first item catches my attention again. I sigh, smile and cross everything else off my "to do" list except that first item. I put a check next to it, walk into the bathroom. I turn on the water, wait for it to get hot and climb in. If I get nothing else done today, I'm going to get that shower taken.

Three Hours, Forty-Five Minutes of Tears, Touchdowns and Testosterone

Kiera checked her watch, 7:45 a.m., she ranted quietly about traffic. She needed to be at Tabitha's in fifteen minutes and wasn't sure she'd make it.

"It is a Sunday morning, what are all you people doing on the road?" She asked herself.

She knew she was being kind of silly, they had time, but she was a stickler. She hated being late or feeling rushed; it put off her entire day. Slowly, traffic moved in front of her. She tromped the gas and took the access road. She would take the back way to Tabitha's house and still get there on time if she slightly ignored the speed limits.

She pulled into Tabitha's drive at one minute 'til eight and smiled. She wasn't early, but at least she was on time. She left the SUV running and jumped out. She walked quickly to Tabitha's door and rang the doorbell.



Tabitha frantically searched her house. She knew she'd washed the shirt. She had found everything else and had even managed to find her stupid booklet from the last one. She tossed clothes from her hamper onto the bathroom floor. Kiera would be here any minute, her mind yelled. Kiera liked to be on time, which meant early. Tabitha had adjusted to her friend's idiosyncrasy. She didn't want to run behind, she knew it would bother Kiera.

She ran to her wash machine and pulled out the clothes she'd left in there. Her shirt wasn't among them. Next she emptied the dryer. No luck. She stood in the laundry room trying to think of it, when the doorbell rang.

"It's open," Tabitha yelled.

"Sorry, I'm running a little late this morning, traffic was a disaster. You about ready?" Kiera asked.

"I can't find my shirt."

"You left it in the SUV after the last game. I washed it." Kiera handed Tabitha a bag. Tabitha smiled, opening the bag and pulling out the red T-shirt.

"Come on, I'll buy you breakfast at IHOP, if you buy me nachos for lunch." Kiera said, walking to the door.

"Deal," they locked the house and began the two hour drive.



Peter got up and dressed early. He had time to kill, so he fumbled around his house. Time had gotten to that point where there wasn't enough to really get interested in anything, but still more than enough to become incredibly bored. He decided to amuse himself by watering the lawn. The lawn didn't need watering, but he really couldn't think of anything else to do. He had to keep busy, if he didn't, his mind would get consumed and he'd wander around aimlessly.

He checked his cell phone twice, making sure it was turned on. Any change in plans and they'd call. He didn't expect changes, but sometimes shit happened. He locked the front door, then pushed on it twice hard with his shoulder to make sure. The security lights would come on at dusk, so he didn't bother leaving an outside light on.

He tossed the hose into the yard, without turning the water on. I'll leave early, he decided. Peter hopped into his truck and drove the twenty miles to pick up his brother, James. As he drove, he tried to keep his mind blank, if he became distracted, he'd wrap his truck around a tree.



Ten miles away, James sat at his table, his wife nagging him.

"Did you take out the trash?" She whined.

"Yes, dear."

"What time do you think Peter will bring you back?"

"Same time as always," he thought about it for a moment and made the decision to piss off his wife. "Unless of course, there's a wreck or Peter decides to chase after some chick."

"Huh," she thrust out her hip and placed her hands on the counter. "I doubt he's going to find him a wife where you guys are going." She turned her back on him. "And if he does, it will prove that he has crappy taste in women."

James shook his head. It was always the same. His wife nagging him about his brother and their plans, he hated it. He pretty much hated her, but he was stuck with her. I don't think very many people will miss her, he thought. I could hide the body in the river, she'd wash up somewhere far away, his mind continued. Of course, then I'll be stuck with her little brats for the rest of my life. At this last thought, he looked at the two children sitting at the table coloring. They weren't his and he didn't mind them nearly as much as he minded their mother. It was only recently that he'd begun to feel animosity towards them and it was their mother's fault.

Outside a car horn sounded.

"That's Peter, I'll see you tonight," he stood up and walked out the door. His brother waved from the truck and James smiled. Early is good, James thought, glancing down at his watch, it was 9:21 a.m.

James climbed in and shut the door. "God, she's a bitch." He said in greeting.

Peter smiled, "if she knew how you spent the occasional Sunday morning, she might divorce you. Have you considered telling her?"

"Yeah, I have, but she'd probably stay and make my life even worse."

"That's why I'm a bachelor, brother."

"God bless you for that. What time are they meeting us?"

"Same time as usual, 10 sharp. They'll call if something changes."



Bradley stood outside his building. He was completely dressed and ready. He'd loaded up on the merchandise the day before. It was his first time and he was so excited his body hummed with energy. He wanted it to be perfect. He had painted his chest, dyed his hair and had made a sign. Bradley was ready...or at least he would be as soon as Nathan showed up.

He paced up and down the walk in front of his apartment building. Where is that asshole, he cursed under his breath. Somehow, he didn't feel stupid, even though he looked a bit queer. An old woman gave him wide berth as she headed for her own apartment. Bradley laughed. He must look like a loon, pacing the sidewalk in this getup and mumbling obscenities to himself, he was surprised no one was calling the cops on him.

He heard Nathan's car rumbling before it got to him. The muffler needed to be fixed, actually replaced. It sounded like a freight train. Soon, the old Buick Skylark came to a rest in front of him.



Nathan hit the steering wheel. "I hate you!" He yelled, talking to the car. He wished Bradley would get a damn car and cart them around. But Bradley was a wussy about driving in the city, so he took public transport or he bummed rides from Nathan. Nathan tried the ignition again, this time, it caught. He thanked a higher power under his breath and backed slowly out of the space.

He weaved the Skylark through traffic with ease. So far, the city wasn't bad, but in a couple of hours, traffic would be a nightmare. He thought about the people who drove from out of town to attend. Stupid assholes, there's no way I'd drive for this, it's just not worth it, he laughed at the thought. Normally, he avoided that section of town during events. Not today, though. It was all Bradley had wanted for his 21st birthday and Nathan was a good friend.

He pulled up in front of Bradley's building and stifled a smirk. It was going to be a long day. He checked his watch, the digital readout said 9:56, they still had two hours. Bradley climbed in. "I was beginning to think you'd forgotten, dude."

"No dude, I wouldn't forget, had some damn car problems. Hope the damn thing starts later."



Peter and James circled the parking lot looking for a space. They spotted a small one and with lots of expert maneuvering, Peter managed to squeeze into the tiny hole. They climbed out of the truck, grimacing as both their doors hit the vehicles they'd parked next to.

"There's the SUV, they're already here. Hope they got a table." Peter pointed out the white Rodeo.

"Me too, I'm starved," James checked his watch. "Damn, they must have flown here, cause it's ten 'til ten." They exchanged a look and laughed. "Kiera drove," they said simultaneously.

Inside the building, Peter and James joined Kiera and Tabitha. Peter was a cattle rancher on the outskirts of Independence, MO. He was also the oldest of the group at 38, never married, no children. His hair had prematurely grayed, but he didn't bother to dye it, he thought it brought out the blue of his eyes and he was right.

James was an engineer, an architectural engineer to be exact. At 33, he had married into a ready-made family. His wife had been married once before and had two boys. When he'd first married her, he'd thought her ex-husband was crazy for leaving her. Now three years later, he wondered why the ex hadn't killed her. These Sunday get-togethers were about his only reason for living. He thought he hid his feelings for his wife pretty good. He was wrong.

Kiera was a writer and the youngest of the group, at 27; she was single, with no children. She had written a book two years earlier and it had sold pretty well, but nothing was currently happening. She couldn't even find inspiration for a next one. She lived by free-lance journalism, book critiques and occasional short stories that found their way into print. Kiera's only real problem was that she lacked confidence in her writing; she thought most of it was crap. She was wrong and everyone but her knew it.

Tabitha was 35, divorced without any responsibilities. She didn't have children, but she did have a very nice alimony settlement. It was a supplement to her real income, she was a computer security consultant. It made her good money, when the alimony was added, Tabitha was the wealthiest of the four. She spent her wealth extravagantly, but not excessively. Whenever she went shopping or on vacation, if she found something a friend might want, she bought it. Giving gifts for no reason made her happy. Her best friend, who was also her cousin, got the brunt of the gifts. Kiera was easy to shop for and treated every gift as if it was the greatest thing to ever happen. Tabitha thought Kiera loved the gifts because they had been given by Tabitha. She was right.

They met by chance, chance created by a computer. Peter and James were season ticket holders for the Kansas City Chiefs. They have tickets in Section 112, Row 27, seats 31 and 32. They have had these tickets for almost fifteen years. Kiera and Tabitha are also dedicated Chiefs fans. Their season tickets are Section 112, Row 27, seats 29 and 30. They have held these seats for almost eight years. This explains how all of them met.

Meals started six years ago, after a devastating loss. The four of them had sat through the entire game, swearing, screaming, jumping up and down. Afterwards, Kiera and Tabitha had been trying to figure out where to go for an after-the-game-late-lunch. Peter had invited himself and James along. It had become tradition, just like the games. For Sunday noon games, they had brunch. Late Sunday and Monday night games ended with dinner. Football was the only thread that connected them.



At five 'til noon, Bradley and Nathan finally found an usher to show them where to sit, they had tickets for Section 112, Row 27, Seats 27 and 28. They sat down next to two women decked out in Chiefs gear. They each had on hats, T-shirts and one girl was wearing KC Wolf sweats. Bradley guessed they were there with their boyfriends, who sat together on the other side of them. He whispered to Nathan as they sat down. Nathan looked and nodded his agreement.

Kiera nudged Tabitha on her right and Peter on her left. "New ticket holders," she said pointing to the two young men who had sat down next to Tabitha. She stifled a giggle as she noticed one of them dyed his hair bright red, with yellow streaks.

Once she had suppressed her urge to laugh at them, Kiera leaned forward and tapped the closest one on the leg. "Hi, I'm Kiera, is this your first game at Arrowhead?"

Bradley smiled, "yeah, it's also my birthday."

"Welcome to the game. This is Tabitha, Peter and James," she pointed to each of them as she introduced them.

"I'm Bradley and this is my friend Nathan."

Nathan leaned up and attempted to whisper into Bradley's ear. "Dude, I think she's hitting on you," he whispered loud enough for everyone near to hear.

"Dude, you're yelling in my ear," Bradley pushed him away. "Damn, I think I've gone deaf."

Kiera sat back in her seat, a frown on her face. Peter leaned over, "I've been sitting here for six years, why haven't you hit on me yet?" He laughed and told James his joke.

"I think they're working very hard on being drunk," Tabitha spoke quietly. The game began. As the Chiefs kicked off, Brad got up and pushed past the four, heading for the nearest restroom.

Twenty-two minutes into it, the ref made a bad call. Arrowhead began its signature "booing" at the refs. The entire stadium rumbled with the noise. Next to Tabitha, Brad lost it.

"You stupid fucker, how could you call that? What are you, fucking blind? Dumb cocksucker needs to get off the damn field, dirty old bastard probably can't even remember his fucking name, let alone the fucking rules," Bradley screamed.

In front of them, Kiera noticed a woman cringe and try to cover the ears of a pre-teen boy. Kiera touched Peter and pointed at the woman and boy then over at Bradley, who was still shouting obscenities. Peter shook his head, pushing past Kiera and Tabitha, he touched Bradley on the shoulder.

"Hey man, tone it down. I know it's exciting and sometimes you forget yourself, but we have ladies and children over here, so we try to keep the bad language to a minimal."

Tabitha leaned into Peter and whispered something. Peter sighed and nodded his head. Tabitha vacated her seat and went to sit by James. Peter slid into her seat, between Kiera and Bradley. Brad and Nathan both got up, again heading for the restroom. Nathan managed to step on Peter's and James's toes on his way past.

By half-time, Brad and Nathan had downed four beers each and been to the bathrooms about a dozen times. Each time they got up, they managed to bump, nudge, or step on someone. To put it mildly, they were drunk and getting stupid. Bradley whipped off his shirt to reveal the paint underneath. Somehow, he'd managed to spell "Chefs" instead of "Chiefs". Tabitha and James laughed about the spelling error and Peter tried to point it out. Bradley ignored them completely.

"I'm going to go get some nachos," Kiera huffed. She returned a few minutes later to find that seats had shifted once again and now she was stuck next to Bradley and Nathan. She gave Peter a dirty look as she took the empty seat. Peter smiled and grabbed a nacho.

With the beginning of third quarter, the drinking also returned. Bradley and Nathan both had brand new bottles and were chugging them down. Bradley noticed the Kiera's nachos and took a couple, double dipping them in her cheese.

"I'm done, you can have them," she said, handing the nachos to Brad. She leaned forward, "James, I think it's your turn."

"Not until fourth quarter," James replied.

The Chiefs scored, fans jumped to their feet, screaming and cheering. Brad also jumped. The nachos went flying, the cheese hitting Kiera's shirt and sliding down to the ground. He turned to help her clean it off and dropped his beer. The falling bottle spewed beer over her jeans.

"Here, let me help." Brad grabbed a napkin and began wiping her shirt off. He was either too drunk to notice or it was a cheap excuse, but he managed to grab her boob in the process.

"Get away from me," Kiera said. "James it's your turn now." James got up, switching seats with her.

The rest of the game seemed to go with incident. The game ended and Kiera frowned.

"We won, what's the problem?" Tabitha asked.

"Look at me!" Kiera yelled. Lowering her voice she continued, "what if those twits are the new season ticket holders?"

Tabitha also frowned. She tapped James and whispered something to him. James turned to the two boys. "Are you guys the new season ticket holders?"

"I wish, this was great!" Brad responded to the Chiefs win.

Kiera sighed and smiled. She looked down at her clothes, she still had a two hour or more drive back to Columbia. At least she wouldn't have to deal with them again.

"Hey, Kiera right?" Brad asked.

"Yes," she tried not to sound annoyed but it was hard. Brad swayed on his feet.

"I'm really sorry about your clothes, but I'm sure this happens all the time. Can I get your number?" He asked.

Kiera frowned again. It actually had never happened to her before. Normally she didn't have to sit by people who didn't respect others. "I don't think my boyfriend would be happy if I gave out my number." She said.

"Oh, I didn't think you had a boyfriend, you didn't seem very friendly with the guys you were with."

"It's football, it takes most of my attention," she grabbed Peter by the arm. "Honey, I think I need to go home and change, now."

Peter walked out of the stadium with Kiera clutching his arm. He smiled to himself, James and Tabitha trailed behind.

"At least they won't be at the next one." Tabitha yelled.

"It will probably be someone worse." Kiera replied. "And I'm not sitting next to them."

Intimacy

The lights were out. The TV was on, casting shadows upon the wall. Flashes of color that lit up the room for a solitary moment, before letting the dark cocoon back around them. The volume was low.

She wasn't paying attention to what was on. She lay on her side. Her eyes were half closed. She was mostly nude, only in her panties. Behind her, she could feel his presence.

He was touching her. One arm was under her head. The other draped over her body. He too, was mostly nude. He wore only boxers.

Her hand played with his, both of them. She made a point of touching both his hands. She moved her hands so that his fingers slid between hers. Her thumb stroked whatever part of skin it happened to be resting on.

She scooted into him, curling more to fit her body against his. He let go of her hand. He tucked his arm around her waist, pulling her as close as she could get. His breathing tickled the hair on her head; his scruffy, unshaven chin occasionally catching a stray strand, forcing him to adjust his head. Each time made her giggle.

She could feel his heart beat in his chest. Feel his chest heave with every breath. Everyone reassuring her that he there was nowhere else he would rather be.

They chatted quietly, half asleep. The events of the day being replayed with their voices. They talked about tomorrow. They chatted about their friends.

Every word made her relax. The sound of his voice soothing her into a state of peace she had never found until she had found herself in his arms. Time ticked by them, ignoring them.

This was the time she loved most. She enjoyed being with him in whatever they did, but in the semi-dark, with only the sounds the two of them made, those were her favorite. The world outside turned from reality to being a simple story. This world was the only one that mattered.

He could feel her breathing. He could hear every quiet, contented sigh she made. There was no way for him to explain it. He had been with other women; he had even lived with a few. But lying next to her gave him something he had never experienced before.

In the semi-dark, he was no longer afraid. No longer afraid he would fail at whatever his next endeavor was. There was something different about her. Something that filled him with wonder. He didn't want to admit it to himself, but wrapped up with her was his favorite time.

Her gentle breathing would turn to deep, rumbling snoring once the sighing stopped. Her allergies would keep him up half the night. He knew she was embarrassed by it. At first, it had annoyed him, but now, the sound made him smile. She was flawed, just like him. That flaw made her more captivating.

His hand stroked hers, enjoying the feel of her skin. He knew she didn't understand what these moments meant to him. He also knew he couldn't explain it. But he never wanted them to end. He wanted to stop time when they were together. Not all time, only this time.

The time they spent, curled up together in bed, enjoying the quiet company of the other. Anything beyond the bedroom door was a distant, far away land. He kissed the back of her hair, enjoying the feel of it, bringing another sigh to her lips. His eyes were half-closed, but he was fighting sleep. If he fell asleep, the night would end. The morning would chase away their secret world.

She too was fighting sleep. She didn't want to lose their skin touching. Sometime along the way, these nights had gone from her attempts to get into his pants, to her attempts to keep him out of her heart. It was a losing battle or one that was already lost. She longed for these moments every day. When the world melted away and it was just the two of them. It was those moments when neither of them felt the need to play some role.

Yes, these were the moments that turned lust into love. The moments when intimacy replaced sex and the world vanished into shadows leaving only two lovers to bask in the glow of true friendship.

Ascension

The room was hot and there was no breeze blowing in through the windows. The heavily perfumed air combined with the heat was making me sleepy. My brothers and I mingled in the crowded room with our father's friends and viziers. Our mothers took turns standing next to father. Outside the palace, the sun was starting to set, while a crowd of the common people gathered for my father's announcement. The gala event was being held so that my father could name his successor to the Egyptian throne. Tonight, one of my brothers would be named Pharaoh.

As children of Pharaoh, my brothers and I each had our own guard. As Pharaoh's only daughter, my guard had been increased around my 14th birthday. My mother was Pharaoh's first wife, but she had only had one child and I had been a girl. I was actually the sixth oldest child of Pharaoh's 53 children. As a child, my brothers had lavished me with attention and as we grew older they still tried to shield me from the world. However, Pharaoh would not have that. All of his children had been instructed by the best tutors and forced to attend meetings of the state. We had all been taught the importance of being Pharaoh.

At 17 years old, I was still unmarried, I had plenty of suitors, but Pharaoh always found some flaw with them. I had originally thought it was because Pharaoh was over protective, but then a year ago, he had sent me to lead his army against the Nubians. It had been a small skirmish. Pharaoh's army had mainly been a deterrent to keep other Nubian forces from joining the conflict. My brothers had been outraged. They couldn't believe Pharaoh would send a girl into battle when there were plenty of men around to do the job. A few of them had voiced their displeasure to Pharaoh, but I didn't know the reply. I had been sent on two more campaigns over the last year. With Pharaoh's army and my guard, both had been successful.

Since our return from the last campaign against a small Hittite force, my guard had started watching me more closely. There were 14 total and I always seemed to have at least four around me. I think they too were starting to suspect that Pharaoh had something against me. None of them would voice their concerns though, I had tried to coax and threaten it out of them and it hadn't worked. I had left it alone and not carried through with my threats; they were my guard, but also my friends. I had grown up surrounded by these men and they all seemed very willing to die to protect me.

The moment had arrived. The palace had two speech balconies. One of them for Pharaoh, his head wife, and the other members of the nobility and one for his children, my guard and youngest brother came towards me as we started to move onto the balcony. Ament took my hand and tugged on me. At six, his guard consisted of three men, all of them older military men, retired from Pharaoh's army. It was doubtful that Ament would ever see the throne, there were far too many older brothers the Gods could divine to the seat.

"Look, Kamaat." Ament tugged me towards the edge of the balcony, pointing down into the crowd. "Look at all those people." My eldest brother, Amenkohotep, gave me a very thin, strained smile and took hold of my wrist. He leaned in very close to me and whispered in my ear.

"Move Ament to the back of the balcony, I do not want him ruining my moment." He hissed. For a moment I just stood there. Then I leaned back into him.

"And how are you so sure that Osiris has blessed you into becoming Pharaoh, Amenkohotep?" I spat back at him. "What will you do if it is Ament who has been blessed to the throne? Then it will be me telling you to move back and not ruin his moment. Don't you think it is odd that Pharaoh has waited until Ament is of age before announcing his successor?" I took Ament's hand. "Come Ament, let us have some fun while these stiffs worry about their lineage." I smiled down at Ament.

"When I am Pharaoh, Kamaat, you will regret crossing me." Amenkohotep said. My guard moved closer to me.

"If you are named Pharaoh, I will go live with the Sea People, Amenkohotep, rather than live by your sword." I walked away, Ament bouncing beside me. I knew the routine; Pharaoh would stand for several minutes without saying anything. A priest of Ra would then say a prayer to the Gods. Pharaoh's announcement would follow that. Then there would be a big celebration and festivals to the Gods would continue for several weeks.

I truly did not want Amenkohotep to be Pharaoh. My second eldest brother, Seti, would make a much better ruler. I hoped that Seti would be named Pharaoh tonight, I worried about the safety of Egypt if Amenkohotep was named successor. Amenkohotep was the brother that I had the most animosity towards. At 20 years old, he was vain and cruel. He had already started to choose his harem and had been talking for years about things that would be done when he was Pharaoh. Surely, Osiris hadn't cursed Egypt.

The Priest of Ra began the prayer. I took Ament's hands in mine and helped him to pray to the Gods. My ever-watchful guards towered around me as I knelt down to be eye level with Ament. The prayer ended and my guards helped me to stand up. One of them, bent down to pick up Ament. Ament's guards came in closer to us, but I smiled at them and they relaxed. I would not harm Ament and they knew it.

As Pharaoh began his speech, Ament busied himself by playing with my hair and perfumed cone. "People of the Black Land, I have been truly blessed. Osiris and Ra have seen fit to give me 52 sons and 1 daughter. Lord Anubis has seen fit to not take any of them from me. I thought that Lord Osiris was waiting to give me an answer as to who would be Pharaoh, however, if I had opened my eyes, I would have seen his answer long ago. My head wife, Niareti, bore me one child, a daughter, she is the sixth oldest. Lord Osiris has divined that Kamaat, my daughter, will be Pharaoh." The crowd below us erupted into celebration. Cheers and applause swept through the people. My brothers all turned to look at me, as my guard stepped in closer. Ament tugged on my braid and giggled.

"Osiris does listen to prayers." He whispered as he threw his arms around me.

The crowd began to settle and Pharaoh continued. "My army was more than willing to follow her into battle and when they returned victorious, many of them claimed that it was her presence that inspired the victory. The Gods have blessed her with bravery, intelligence, wisdom and strength. All the things required to make a good descendant of Lord Osiris..." As Pharaoh continued, I felt the world spinning out of control. I had never expected to be named successor to Pharaoh. A guard took my arm. I turned to see one of Pharaoh's guards holding onto me.

He leaned in and whispered very near my ear. "You look pale, Princess, are you all right?"

"Define all right?" I whispered back.

"If you are well enough, Pharaoh wishes you to join him on the other balcony."

"I am well enough." I replied, letting him lead me from the balcony. We entered the palace's main room. My guard surrounding me while Pharaoh's guard led me to join him. I paused and looked at my guards. Pharaoh's guard stopped as well, turning to look at us.

"Did you know?" I asked my guard. One by one, they all nodded their ascent. My head guard, Senbimery, spoke up.

"We were told shortly before leaving to face the Hittites. Pharaoh told us so that we could report on your ability to handle conflict, the willingness of the army to fight under your command and your battle skills. Princess, you must understand, it was with heavy hearts that we swore not to tell you." I sighed and looked at them.

"It is all right, I understand that when Pharaoh commands secrecy, you must do as he bids."

"Princess? You must hurry if you are well." Ramos urged. It was the first time the Pharaoh's guard had ever called me princess, I was usually just Kamaat.

"I am coming." I turned and dashed towards the balcony. As I approached, I could hear Pharaoh coming to the end of his speech. I was hoping that I hadn't taken too long.

"My health is waning, because of this, my advisors and I have decided that I will step down from the throne and Princess Kamaat will be crowned Pharaoh tonight." Pharaoh concluded his speech as a collective sob ran through the crowd. I myself felt a tear slide down my cheek. I had never dreamed of being Pharaoh, but more over, I couldn't imagine my father not being Pharaoh.

A scribe stepped to the front of the balcony as I stepped back into the open. I noticed the sun had finally set and the air was already starting to cool down. I took a deep breath, before Ramos, started shoving me towards Pharaoh.

Pharaoh turned to look at me. His eyes were smiling, but his mouth was pursed. He took my hand as the scribe went through the ritual of the crowning. As the scribe finished, my father turned to face me. Everyone moved out of the way of the balcony edge, giving the crowd below, the ability to see us. My mother handed my father a fake beard from her robes. A tear slid down her face and she quickly wiped it away. My father attached the beard to my chin, using a leather strap. Then what I thought would be saddest thing of my life happened. Pharaoh, my father, took the crown off of his head and placed it on mine. His eyes sparkled with an unnatural light and I realized that my father was trying not to cry. As the crown of Upper and Lower Egypt slipped into place on my head, the crowd once again erupted into cheers.

I turned to face the cheering mass below me. I would not deliver an address to the people, I didn't have one prepared. I smiled down at them from the balcony and felt the world sway gently beneath my feet. Then I turned and walked back into the palace. The other people on the balcony followed me into the main room. Quietly I slipped away from them, only my guard saw me go up the stairs. Within moments, they had joined me along with several of Pharaoh's guard. I turned to look at them.

"If you are all here, who is protecting my father?" I asked. "Some of you must go back." I ordered. Abruptly, several of the Pharaoh's guard retreated from where they had came. I turned and proceeded up the stairs. I needed a moment to think.

I ended in the tower room. The tallest point in the palace. A balcony surrounded the entire round room, with multiple doors leading from the room to the balcony. I stepped onto the balcony and took another breath. I couldn't believe that I had been named Pharaoh. From here, I could see most of the city sprawling out from the palace and beyond it, the Nile River emptying into the Mediterranean Sea. Ships were passing on the river, going to and from different ports. Plumes of smoke issued from the kilns in the distance on the other side. Egypt was currently a striving nation, my father had worked very hard to ensure her wealth and independence. I hoped that I would be able to do the same thing. I heard footsteps on the stone floor behind me. I turned to see Pharaoh standing in the doorway. I started to bow to him, but he stopped me with a hand and bowed to me instead.

"Pharaoh. Is everything all right?" He asked. I looked at him, the surprise showing on my face. I touched the beard and then the crown; I removed both of them and sat them on the railing.

"I do not think I am cut out to be Pharaoh." I replied.

"Yes, you are, if you were not Osiris, would not have chosen you."

"Pharaoh..." I started, but he interrupted me with his hand.

"No, from now on, I am father and you are Pharaoh. Remember?" He smiled at me. "Your reluctance to take control is a worthy trait in a ruler. It means that you are afraid of letting your people down. If all the ruler's of Egypt had been so reluctant in the beginning, Egypt would have been better off."

"Why did you step down tonight?" I asked, "I know that you are not actually sick."

"You are very clever for you age, Pharaoh. I am not sick, but we thought it might be an easier transition for you and your brothers if I was still alive for a while after your crowning."

"Why me? Why not Seti or one of the others?"

"Pharaoh, may I tell you a story?" He asked.

"Of course." I replied.

"When your mother and I were married, I was not yet Pharaoh, my father had not named me successor even. Many believed that my younger brother would become Pharaoh. I was very surprised when Pharaoh named me successor. I too, was reluctant at first, my brother was much more politically motivated than I was. I began to build my harem of wives and mistresses before he died and when I ascended to the throne, none of them had become pregnant. Finally, two of my wives and one mistress became pregnant; each boy was born within three months of each other. I had had two more children when we found out that your mother would probably never produce a child. When she did become pregnant, we knew it was a sign from Osiris that that child would become Pharaoh. When it turned out she had a girl; many of my advisors thought that one of the other women should become head wife because they had borne me a son. However, I would not hear of it. As the years went by and I had more sons, but no more daughters, the advisors began to wonder if they had acted too hastily. When you were 14 you came to me one day and told me that if I didn't start taking the offensive in the south, we would lose land to the Nubians. It was decided upon that day that you were indeed the one Osiris had sent to be Pharaoh. We kept it a secret because of the lust of power one of your brothers showed. When you were 15 and began to have suitors I knew that I couldn't marry you off to just anyone and none of them fit the standards to be the consort of Pharaoh. Which is when I decided to start sending you to lead my army. Only men who were truly worthy would dare to ask for the hand of a woman with war experience. The suitors slowly stopped coming at that point. Now that you are Pharaoh, they will start back up again. You are allowed a consort and a harem. You must choose them wisely, for you will have as many enemies as you have friends in this court."

"You are my father, you have the right to choose my suitors."

"That was true until this evening, Pharaoh, but now that the crown is yours, you may choose who you please." He looked down at the beard and the crown. "I only have a couple of more pieces of advice. Never leave your crown lying around or your beard. It is a silly custom, but without both of them, you do not have the right to rule. Listen to the advice of advisors, but don't always take it. Trust your own judgment and consider the people affected when you make a decision. They love you because you are the incarnation of Horus, but if they think you are doing them injustice, they will turn upon you." He sighed. "Come, Pharaoh, you must join the celebration, for it is in your honor." I followed my father, the former Pharaoh, down to the celebration. My entrance brought a stir from the crowd and within moments well wishers, advisors and the Pharaoh's guard surrounded me.

A woman on the throne had brought great problems to Egypt. I was doing a relatively good job of ruling by the sixth month of my succession. However, while Egypt didn't have a lot of internal problems, our enemies on the borders took it as a weakness. Attacks by the Hittites, Nubians and Sea People had increased dramatically. I spent almost as much time leading the army as I did attending to other matters of the state. So far, the army had been victorious in all of its defensive campaigns. I was gearing up for another round of attacks, only this time I had plenty of advanced warning. In three weeks, the Hittites would attack our border cities again. I would meet them before they got there. The army was scheduled to leave in a few hours and in my absence Seti would be commander-in-charge. I had also named him my heir, just in case something happened to me in the field. Ament was distraught over my having to leave again so soon. He had been looking forward to playing games with me once I returned from the north.

I arrived at the largest border-city in less than a week. I had left the palace with a skeleton crew; most of the guard was with me. I also had half the Egyptian army. The other half was left to guard the capital city of Wasset. I wanted the Hittite wars to end and the only way to do that was to convince their king that it was madness to continue his attacks. I would slaughter his army and then march into his lands. I would take prisoners along the way and destroy villages and food. The prisoners would be escorted back to the Black Land. My goal was take the king's son. He was an arrogant boy of 16 who thought he would control Egypt when my army fell. I was determined not to let that happen.

One of my spies arrived the day after my arrival. He spoke in hushed tones in the house of the Visor to tell me that the Hittite army was 5000 men strong with reinforcements in the area if they were needed. I smiled at him. The Egyptian army had over 100,000 men and half of them were camped out in this city and the cities around here. I didn't tell him this though; I didn't entirely trust his loyalty. Instead, I let him watch as I drew up a letter asking for more men. He told me the Hittites would be here at the end of the month. Which meant two weeks at the latest. Plenty of time for me to prepare for the attack. However, I told him to try and stall the Hittites because I would need more time to get my reinforcement troops here. With that he left to go back to the Hittites.

I called in my guard. One of them was going to have to fake taking the letter to Wasset. In the meantime, I needed to get organized and start heading towards the Hittite camps. The best battles are fought when one side is caught off-guard. I knew the Hittites wanted this city. It was the main trade-city for trade with Babylon. I would leave 8,000 of my men here, the city army and guard would make it about 10,000. The others would leave with me and begin our march towards the Hittites. The Hittites were notorious fighters, but the size of my army did seem like slight overkill. Better to be too prepared than not prepared enough.

They left me for my evening prayer. Tonight and every night until this battle was won would be slightly different than usual. Normally, I prayed to the Gods in a specific order. Tonight I would change that order. I was sure that Ra would forgive me. My first prayer tonight went to Seth instead of Ra. My second went to Anubis instead of Horus. I had decided that I needed the Gods of War and Death on my side. I continued my prayers as normal after that. I curled up in bed and slept.

The guards woke me just as the sun was setting. We have a slightly different sleeping pattern in the Black Land. We sleep in two sections. The first time is during the afternoon, when the heat of the sun beats down on the earth. The Sun God Ra takes his punishments out at that time. The heat has killed many Egyptians, so now we hide from the sun as it journey's across the afternoon sky. Things resume again when the sun goes down and the land cools.

I awoke to look at my guards. Some of them were from my father's guards and some of them had been with me since I was a child. I knew all their names. I knew the names of their wives and children and parents. As Pharaoh, it was required that I take these men into battle with me, but as a person, it saddened me to think of one of them dying. I watched the West as the last of Ra's glory descended below the land. Below me, I could hear the city waking up. Everyone was frightened of the Hittite invasion. I watched as my men in my army began to appear on the streets, lining up outside the Visor's home. It was time to go.

I descended the steps from my room to the main living quarters. The Visor and his family, came out to meet with me. They told me they had prayed for my swift victory and safe return. I smiled and thanked them, before heading out to speak to my troops.

We meet just outside of the city. A large army, disciplined and under my complete control. I didn't fear they would retreat, I knew they wouldn't. This was their home that they were defending. I tried to memorize every face. I didn't know all their names and if they died, I wouldn't remember them two months from now. However, I would be the one to inform their families. It was my duty and responsibility to these brave men who stood before me. I smiled and under the light of the moon finally understood my place in the world.

The troops gathered together for the march to the Hittites. For the first time in my life I would make a statement about Egypt and Pharaoh. Tonight I would show the world why the Egyptians were not to be trifled with. I had only given my troops one command before we prayed, destroy everything.

I mounted my horse and waited while my guards followed suit. Once mounted they were to stay 15 feet behind me at all times. I was the one who led the men. I was going to be the first one to draw my sword and face the battle. We began the march. I estimated the rate of travel and figured that we would be at the Hittite camps in less than two days. We would rest during the hot times of the day and move all night long. The troops all had dried food they could eat as we moved. Behind the troops, horse drawn wagons carried food, water, and other supplies. Other wagons contained holding cages and mobile hospital equipment. When we got within a mile of the Hittites, the army would fan out. They would make a line of troops 30 men deep and longer than the eye could see. It was an excellent way to attack. It allowed the ends to move around behind the enemy and was a technique that my father had perfected.

As we passed towns, more men joined the march. People offered up prayers for us. Women wept and children cheered. Some of the men who joined the ranks were already part of the army. Others were city guards and provincial soldiers and some were just men who had swords and were prepared to defend their native soil to the death. It made me proud to be Pharaoh and proud of the people I ruled. Scribes were quickly scribbling down names of the new comers. They were to get as much information about these men as possible in case they did not return.

The last village was passed and the borders my father had fought hard to gain and control were quickly come upon us. I had been wrong in my estimation, we had been four days marching. I called for a rest. The Hittite army had been spotted ten miles from here. They had had the same idea as me. They were marching full force towards us. I climbed down from my horse and looked at the area. Everywhere I saw men eating and laughing. They were enjoying water and wine that had been given to us as we passed through the western part of the Black Land. It was impossible to bring enough supplies for this many men. The armies depended upon the generosity of the people they were defending.

The people had come through in a way I hadn't expected. We had gained people, horses, carts, food, water, wine and anything else we could carry or stick in a wagon. I had started the journey four days earlier with 25,000 men. We had picked up another 20,000 troops along the way, but the scribes were still recording names. When they reported to me, each of them had an astounding number of men that had joined us that were not part of the army. I briefly wondered if there were any men left on the western side of Egypt. The thought made me smile.

We rested for almost an entire day. The morale of the men skyrocketing along with the tension of war. It was enough that you could feel it on your skin, like the air was breathing it. I stopped to pray again. This time I slighted most of the Gods and spoke only to Set and Anubis. I would need them soon and I was pretty sure the other gods wouldn't take offense. I gave the order to move out.

Like clockwork, when I said we were near the Hittites the army began to fan out. I had more troops than I could have imagined. I turned to look at them and even with the added height of my horse, I couldn't see either end of the troops. I hoped I was somewhere near the center of the line. The final phase of our march was at hand. We would not run towards the battle like some do. We would face it in a calm, grim manner. Something to be accepted, not enjoyed.

I came over a small hill and below us lay a valley. It was in this valley that the Hittite army was now secured. I looked down upon them. They were pitching camp as the sun began to set again. The beginning of the fifth day was upon us. I sighed and drew my sword. I yelled down to the men who camped before me. I would give them a chance to surrender, but I knew they wouldn't take it.

Below me, the Hittites drew their swords and a man screamed back at me. I didn't understand him, not because of a language barrier, because he screamed wordlessly. I yelled back to my own troops and we began to descend. I went first into the valley, behind me my guard followed and then the troops.

The battle was over before it had begun. It had been quick and merciless. I looked at the grass. The once fertile ground was tainted with the blood of many. Doctors were patching up troops from both sides. The prisoners, dead and wounded would be taken back to the nearest city to wait our return. Everyone else would proceed west into the Hittites land.

I was pretty sure that no one had escaped the battle. I would be free to continue west without any warnings going before me. We started again.

For four more days we destroyed every building we came upon. We took prisoners and left their dead. We sent messages to their king, using Hittites that we didn't take captive. On the eve of the sixth day we arrived just outside of their capitol city. It had been fortified, troops milled around outside. It was impossible to move quietly, so we didn't try. I descended upon the Hittite troops and again the battle was over before it had begun.

I gave instructions to one of their survivor's. I wanted to see the king and I wanted to see him now. He would come to me. I waited. I knew that the king would come. He would have to in order to save his beloved city. My troops set up camp. Tonight would be their first night of real rest in almost 20 days. I let them.

I didn't have to wait long. A heralding of music announced the approach of the king. I looked at my hands and arms quickly. I had not bothered to clean myself up. I was covered in blood, soot and dirt. It was the impression I wanted to leave him with. The picture of the Egyptian Pharaoh covered in the blood of his people because of his arrogance.

The king stopped and stared at me for a moment. I sat perfectly still, mounted on a new horse. The horse had the same war-worn look that I had. I would wait for him to address me. He fidgeted for a few moments, but finally spoke.

"Pharaoh, you have come to speak with me," he spoke.

"Yes, I have. You have shown much disrespect towards your neighbor and Egypt will not suffer your indignities any longer. I have come from the Black Land to show you the consequences of your arrogance. I am willing to leave you and your city in peace in return for a gift. I will allow you to rebuild what Egypt has destroyed."

"We have many fine things that the people of Egypt will like," he stammered out. "Gold, silver, gems, crops name your price Pharaoh so that we may start with renewed friendship."

"I will have your eldest son, King," I spoke without faltering. "He will come live in the Black Land to ensure that you do not try this again."

"But, he is heir to my throne, you cannot take him."

"I'm sorry you feel that way. You have 24 hours to make a decision. If you decide that is too high a price to pay I will tear apart this city and claim everything I have passed as Egyptian lands." I turned my back on him and started to head towards where my soldiers had set up camp.

I watched as the moon traveled its way across an unfamiliar sky. Towards the east, I knew my home sat, waiting quietly for my return. I wanted to be home. I wanted to play senet with Ament. I wanted to hear my mother's voice as she brushed through my hair. I wanted my father's advice on whether I was doing the right thing. I took a few moments and prayed to the gods. Many of my war-worn soldiers slept. Others, like me, were too tense to sleep, they sat in groups, huddled around fires talking in swift, hushed tones. I sat alone. My guards were behind me somewhere, but I didn't search for them.

The wait didn't last very long. A royal scribe came from the fortified city and after asking around found me. I stood up to meet him. He bowed low, his braided hair flopping in front of his head.

"Pharaoh of Egypt, King Tinis would like for you to come to the palace to finalize details of the deal." He stood back up and looked at me expectantly.

"I will come see the king," I replied curtly. I motioned for my guards and they followed me into the city. Drums heralded my arrival and people came from their houses to see me pass. I did not look at them. I walked head up, eyes straight, heading for the palace. These were not my people and if things went badly, I would see them shortly at the end of a sword. I didn't need or want to meet their gaze as I passed.

My guards and I were lead into a royal chamber. It looked like the king's place of business. King Tinis was already seated. He fidgeted constantly as we entered.

"Pharaoh, please have a seat." He stood up and waited for me to sit. "I have many children Pharaoh and will gladly give another child if you will leave my city in peace."

"I do not want your other children, I want your eldest son." I sat down, hoping this wasn't the way the entire day was going to go.

"But he is heir, Pharaoh, I cannot just give him up."

"Like you said, you have many children, one of them can be successor to your throne."

"Pharaoh you must understand my position. By giving you the heir to my throne, I look weak in front of my people."

"It is better to look weak than be remembered as the king who brought slaughter to your people."

"But if I appear weak..." He began.

I cut him off. "The decision is yours to make, I have told you what Egypt wants and have told you the consequences of your refusal. Your people cannot stand against my army. I know that your army is in the northern part of your kingdom. You can call them, but by the time they arrive, my reinforcements will be here. You will still lose. I will take whatever I want from this kingdom and leave your bodies to be eaten by the scavengers. You will lose much more than your eldest son. You will lose your kingdom, your children, your wives, your people and your life."

"Do you have no mercy on the people who offered you a kingdom once? Do you remember that I asked your father to let you marry my son? I offered you the seat of a queen once."

"I remember. My father told you that he would kill me before allowing me to marry your son. He also said that if the Lord Osiris wished for me to rule, he would give me the Black Land."

"Rulers of many lands were worried that Amenkhotep would be named Pharaoh after your father. The night he announced his successor, many of us were preparing our armies."

"Had Amenkhotep been named heir, you would have been right to prepare your armies."

"Yes, but you were named Pharaoh. You were given control of the largest army in the world. The Sea People came to me that night, with you as Pharaoh, no one was worried. We would be able to reclaim the land that had been taken from us." He gave a short bark of laughter. "We underestimated you." He motioned for his scribe to come over and whispered something in his ear.

"What is the point to this King Tinis?" I spoke, irritated that I was being treated as such a trivial rival.

"You may have my son, Pharaoh, and supplies enough to get you back to Egypt. I would ask only one thing of you."

"You are not in a position to ask me for anything," I said calmly.

"I may not be, but I will ask it anyway. When you leave here, the peace that I had with your father will continue. Trade will start up again. I will not invade you, you will not invade me. Should you need allies, I will supply you with as much as I can. Likewise, you shall do the same for me. I will need help rebuilding what you have destroyed Pharaoh. I ask that you lend me that aid."

"I do not see a problem with that, granted that I do get your son."

"He should be along shortly." He sighed and suddenly looked very tired and very old.

His son was brought to me within an hour. Already bound and gagged, he looked very angry when King Tinis's guards gave him to mine. I couldn't blame him. We packed and began our journey back to the Black Land that night. It took us much longer to return than it had taken us to leave. Everyone was tired, irritable and homesick. I understood that feeling, I was suffering it too.

We still had plenty of horses when we started. I decided that we would rotate them out, ensuring that everyone had a turn to ride instead of walk home. They were hero's of Egypt and deserved the honor. We rode two to a horse. After you had ridden for a couple of hours, the horses were given to a new set of men. The prisoner wagons were also empty except for the prince. Men clambered into these to hitch a ride home. Even I rode with someone and took my turn walking. The guards were most unhappy with this, but the men seemed to enjoy it. I walked along side soldiers and peasants that I had never met. I rode with a man behind me when I was on my horse. I didn't deserve all the glory, I couldn't have done it without them. Slowly, as the journey continued, the men were allowed to sleep through the day, morale returned. It was the greatest campaign I ever led.

Forty years have passed since that war took place. We helped the Hittites rebuild their kingdom. In time, the prince began to enjoy living in Egypt. I have never forgotten the faces of the men that I walked and rode with on our return.

Now, as the Great Lord Osiris has dictated, I have the pleasure of naming my successor. I was afflicted with the same problems as my mother and never gave birth. However, my brother Ament, had many children. Unfortunately, Ament has passed away and will have to watch his son's face tonight from the afterlife. I will continue to rule Egypt until the Lord Anubis takes me.

Seti and I began walking onto the balcony. The sun was setting in the west. On the Prince's Balcony, all the children my brothers had, were attempting to cram onto it. The youngest one was eight years old. Named for his father, Ament the Second was being held in the arms of a guard. I turned my face towards the people below me as the scribe began reading the royal rites of passage.

Finally, my turn to speak came up. "Great people of the Black Land," I began. "I have been privileged enough to be Pharaoh for forty years. I have led you through famine, flood and war. I will continue to do so until the Lord Anubis takes me to the afterlife. Until then, the Lord Osiris has given me the opportunity to mold and shape your next Pharaoh to do greater things than I. Osiris's decision has been made and Prince Ament will succeed me to the throne. I know that you will love him as you have loved me." I concluded my announcement. The people broke into cheers below me.

Seti gently squeezed my hand as Ament was brought to me. I placed the second crown of Upper and Lower Egypt on his head. By the time he takes the throne, he will have grown his own beard, so I hadn't bothered with it. Ament turned and waved to the people below the Pharaoh's balcony. Then he waved to his brothers, sisters and cousins on the Prince's balcony. Lastly he turned to me. I just stared at him for a moment. He flung his arms around my body and hugged me. I hid a quick smile. There were still some royal mannerisms that he would have to learn

Davidson Family History

Mama's Boys?

Asher and Phillip were both angry with her again. Not that this surprised Sheila, her children were usually mad about something. They were just like their father. Sean was the only one who didn't get mad at her. She thought him the best of the three. Sean always did as his mother asked.

She stuck her head into the garage. "Dinner's ready." Her husband, Dan, looked up from the book he was reading, then back down.

Sean took his head out from under Phil's hood. "Ok, mom, let me wash up and I'll be in."

Asher and Phil shook their heads and went back to whatever it was that they did in the garage with their father. Sheila stomped into the house, her hands balled into fists. She could hear them talking, but couldn't make out the words.

Slamming the bowl of salad down on the table, Sheila began running through the list of abuses she suffered from her sons and husband. Sean came into the kitchen and washed his hands. Asher and Phil followed him, taking their usual seats at the table. Dan was the last one to come in.

Dan lead the meal time prayer. "Lord, please forgive us the sins of this day. Thank you for blessing our table with food and keeping us healthy. Amen." He looked at the table. "Ash, pass the chicken."

Asher handed him the plate with the chicken on it. Sheila watched as they greedily fixed their plates. With each request she got angrier. Dan raised the drumstick to his lips. "Before you start, Dan. I have a few things I'd like to say to this family." He put down the drumstick and stared at his wife. "Asher, your art teacher called this afternoon. It seems you and Arianna Rivers got into some trouble during class. You were painting each other?"

Asher blushed, "just on each other's smocks."

"Why?"

"We were bored. We had both finished painting our pieces and decided to paint on each other's smocks."

"Uh-huh, don't do it again. If you do, young man, she won't be over here for a week. Is that understood? I don't know why you had to take so many classes with her anyway. It's not right for a boy to be best friends with a girl, especially at your age."

Asher looked down at his plate. Sheila continued, "and Phil, I told you not to buy that car. Your brother is always working on something, fiddlin' with something in it. You saved up all that money and bought a piece of junk. It's never going to run right, no matter how much Sean works on it. You've only had it a couple of months, why don't you sell it and start saving up again to buy a different one?"

"Mom, it's a 1968 Charger, it's not junk." Phil pushed his plate away. "And if it wasn't having engine trouble, Sean would still be fiddling with it, because that's what he likes to do."

"No, he does it because he thinks it needs to be done. You spend all your money on that girlfriend of yours and can't afford a real mechanic. So Sean gets stuck doing it all. Sell the car, Phil."

"I'm not selling the car, mom."

"Sheila, the boy keeps the car," Dan said.

"Why don't you ever take my side? You always side with either Phillip or Asher. Sean and I have to do everything around here."

"I like to work on Phil's car, mom. If it wasn't broke, I would still find something to do with it. When it gets running good, I'm going to start changing out parts to give it more power, a better sound, the whole bit." Sean smiled.

The doorbell rang. Sheila saw Asher jump. "It's that girl again?" She looked at him and sighed. "Might as well go let her in, she probably hasn't eaten today." Asher got up.

Arianna Rivers walked into the kitchen. She took an empty seat next to Sean and across from Asher. "Hello," she said quietly, sitting down.

"Arianna," Sheila nodded. "You're just in time, we were about to have dinner. I think some good ol' home cooked food would do you some good. Phillip, get her a plate and silverware."

"I don't want to intrude, Sheila. Ash didn't mention that you were eating, he just said you were all in the kitchen."

"It's not a problem, Arianna, we hadn't started yet and you look like you need some food." Phil handed her a plate with silverware.

"Thank you." Anna took the dishes and set them in front of her. Sheila watched her fill her plate.

"How's the family?" Sheila asked.

"Good. Mom is working nights still."

"Good gracious, nights? No wonder you're eating over here, there's no one to cook for you at home." Sheila smiled. Anna's face reddened and she stared down at the table.

"Anna can cook mother, she's not a kid," Asher looked her in the face.

"That may be, but she isn't an adult yet either, Asher, she shouldn't bare all the household responsibilities." Sheila turned back to Anna. "You're father still isn't working then? Why hasn't your brother gotten a job to help out the family?"

"Sheila," Dan frowned at her. "I think we should eat before all this food gets too cold."

Sheila stuck out her bottom lip and her eyes narrowed. Everyone knew that look. She was pouting and dinner could begin as long as no one said anything. If they did, Sheila would blow-up on everyone.

They ate in almost complete silence. Silverware clinked against the plates, glasses thudded as they were placed on the wood table. When they had all finished, Sheila stood up and walked out of the room. She heard Dan tell the kids to clean up.

He entered her sitting room and stared at her. She remained quiet, daring him to break the silence first. After several minutes, he did.

"That was impolite, Sheila. Why would you say that to her? Anna has been at our house almost every day for the last dozen years or so."

"Well, it isn't right, Dan. That girl spends more time here than at her own home. She gets Asher into trouble at school and her family doesn't seem to care."

"I'm sure her family does care. As far as the trouble goes, Ash does that himself. You and I both know that if it wasn't her, it would be someone else he got into trouble with. Anna at least keeps him from getting into serious trouble."

"I can't believe you're going to stand there and defend her! Asher was a good kid until she started coming into this house. And now they are both teenagers. She'll be pregnant before she graduates. It will probably be your son's baby. How do you feel about that?" She yelled.

"I don't think Anna or Asher is that irresponsible. Besides, Anna is more like a sister to Ash than anything else."

"He should be hanging around with boys, not girls. When was the last time he brought home a boy? I can't remember, Dan, it's been that long. He only brings home Anna. He's 15, he doesn't have a girlfriend. I have never once heard him talk about a girl other than her."

"Boys do not talk to their mothers about girls they're interested in. When was the last time Sean mentioned one?"

"Sean's different."

"Why? Because he's not Asher?"

"Because he's too busy fixing his brother's junkie car to be interested in a girl. That's why."

"Phil's car isn't junkie. Sure it has some problems, we knew this when he bought it. If it hadn't he wouldn't have been able to get it so cheap. You didn't complain about the price."

"I expected the left-over money to be sent to an account for college, not spent on some girl."

"Ok, you're mad because one son doesn't date and the other does. That's stupid, Sheila."

"You never take my side, Dan. Why don't you just go back to the garage and read one of your silly books." Sheila stomped her foot. "Better yet, why don't you just leave. That's what you've been wanting for the last 20 years."

"Sheila, I have never wanted to leave you or the boys."

"No, you've never wanted to leave the boys. You don't give a damn about me."

"I do give a damn about you." Dan took hold of her shoulder. "I married you, didn't I?"

"Don't patronize me." Sheila knew that the argument was over. Things would get back to normal in a few minutes. She waited before she began talking again. "Did you go to the bank?"

"Yes."

"Did you remember Sean's birthday present?"

"Yes."

"Is Phil going to take Asher to school tomorrow?"

"No..."

"I can't take him, Dan. I've got a meeting with the ladies auxiliary club in the morning and then a bridge game tomorrow afternoon."

"Sean is going to take Asher."

"Why didn't you say that? I was worried I'd have to rely on Anna's brother to take him."

"You didn't let me."

"You could have said 'Sean is going to do it' instead of 'no'."

"Yes, I guess I could have." Dan sighed. "I'm going to go get a shower." He kissed Sheila lightly on the forehead.

Sheila stood alone in the room for a few minutes. Looking around, she noticed that some of the stuff was out of place. She began arranging it. From the kitchen, she heard Sean laugh.

Leaving the sitting room, she entered the kitchen again. Asher and Sean were spraying each other with water from the faucet. "What on earth are you kids doing?" She shrieked.

All of them looked up. "Just having some fun," Asher smiled at her. "We'll clean it up."

"Well, you'd better. Are those dishes done yet?"

"Yes, Sheila." Anna smiled at her.

"Then clean up the water mess. And Sean, when you change your shirt, make sure you tuck the new one in, you look like a slob." She walked out of the kitchen. The laughter began again. She sighed and sat down on the couch. Her knitting needed to be finished.

That was how she spent most nights. She knitted in the sitting room while Dan sat in the garage reading a book. It had been like that most of their marriage. At nine, she turned the lights off, made Anna go home and went to bed.

Her alarm went off. She rolled over, kissed Dan good morning and got out of bed. Sheila fixed breakfast for everyone and went upstairs to wake the boys.

When everyone had come downstairs, she looked at Asher. "Is Anna riding to school with you and Sean?"

"Yeah."

"Then we'll give her a few more minutes before starting breakfast. I know she'll eat over here. She always does when she rides to school with you. Which is practically every day. Phil, has Anna ever given you money for taking her to school? It sure would help with the gas."

"Mom, she lives next door, I don't burn any extra gas taking her to school." Phil looked at his mother. "Yes, she gives me money once a week for it." Sheila thought about pressing the issue but didn't.

"Disgraceful. This used to be such a good neighborhood and then people like the Rivers' started moving in. A mother who works night and a father that doesn't work at all. It's no wonder she spends her time over here. Her house can't be very comforting." She looked at the table. "Asher did you clean your room like I told you?"

"Yes."

Sheila looked up and inspected each boy. "Sean, tuck your shirt in. You'll never get anywhere in life if people think you don't care about your appearance. Phil wears his shirts tucked in everyday and even Asher manages that."

Sean began tucking his shirt in as the doorbell rang. "That would be for you Asher, go let the girl in." Asher left the room. "Dan, I'm going to need some money for the bridge game."

Dan nodded to her as Asher and Anna entered the kitchen. "Good morning, Arianna, you're just in time for breakfast." Sheila said adding another plate.

"I've already had breakfast, Sheila, but thank you. I'll wait in the living room."

"Nonsense, look at you, you're skinny as a twig, you need to eat. Besides, I've over cooked this morning and if you don't eat, some of it will go to waste." Sheila put the plate on the table. Anna sat down.

"Are you and Asher going to get into trouble again today dear?" Sheila shoveled a fork full of eggs into her mouth and watched as Anna blushed.

"It wasn't that big of a deal, mom," Asher looked at his plate.

"It warranted a call home. Did they also call your family, Arianna?"

"Yes, Sheila." Her face reddened some more.

"Good. Then maybe you two will behave today. Sean, did you brush your hair today?"

"Yeah, it just doesn't like to cooperate."

"Go brush it again after breakfast."

"It won't help," Asher looked her. "His hair always looks like that, even after he's brushed, gelled and hair sprayed it within an inch of its life. Nothing short of shaving his head is going to make it any neater."

Sheila narrowed her eyes at him. "Well, go try again, Sean. Phil you need to bring your brother home from band practice tonight."

"Mom, I've got to work tonight," Phil protested.

"Well, Asher has to get home somehow."

"I'll pick him up," Sean said.

"No, Sean, you're taking him to school. It's your brother's responsible to make sure he gets home. Besides, if you pick him up, then you'll have to come all the way home and then go back to school. It wastes gas."

"I'll just stay at school."

"Phil, you could pick him up and bring him home on your dinner break."

"Then he doesn't have time to eat dinner, mom. I'll just walk home." Asher pushed his plate away.

"You will do no such thing. It's not safe."

"We only live six blocks."

"Yes, but it's not a very good neighborhood to walk through."

"Other kids walk."

"Not mine, Asher. Dan, talk some sense into the boy."

"You can't walk home Ash," Dan said shaking his head.

"I said I would stay after school. I have some research to do in the library anyway," Sean almost whispered.

"No, I told Phil to do it and Phil should be the one to do it. He's the oldest. Before you got your car, he was responsible for both of you."

"Mom, Phil has to work. He can't just take off to bring me home. Either Sean picks me up or I walk home." Asher stood up.

"Um, Sheila, my brother could bring him home. Tony has football practice, it lets out a few minutes before band, but I'm sure he wouldn't mind."

Sheila glared at her. "Fine, then I guess Tony will bring you home," she said through clenched teeth. Truth was, she didn't want any of her children associating with the Rivers and wasn't sure Tony bringing Asher home was a good idea, but she couldn't reject it now.

The boys left for school, Anna tagging along. Sheila looked at Dan. "You could have helped me out."

"What I think Tony bringing Asher home was a good idea."

"Tony can't drive very well. What if he has an accident? What if he decides to skip football practice? What if he decides to go buy drugs and gets Asher to try them?"

"Oh come on Sheila, do you really think Tony does drugs?"

"I'd say it's very possible. He's a football player isn't he?"

"What does football have to do with drugs?"

"They are always trying to find a way to make themselves bigger, stronger, faster. So they take drugs."

"Those are steroids and Asher wouldn't do them. He doesn't need them."

"And letting Asher talk back to me. He was so disrespectful and you just sat there, shoving food down your throat."

"Asher wasn't trying to be disrespectful, he was trying to find a solution. I agree with him, Phil can't leave work to go get him. Why are you suddenly so concerned about the price of gas?"

"Why shouldn't I be? Our sons have gotten sucked into a ring of freeloaders and you don't seem to care that our money is going to support all their friends."

"They're not freeloaders. You heard Phil, Anna gives him gas money to take her some place that he is already going."

"I doubt that. I doubt that girl has ever had a dime in her pocket. I bet Asher spends all his money on her when they go out."

"That's ridiculous, Sheila. And if Anna isn't getting any money from her parents, then I'm glad Asher shares his with her. We've always tried to teach the boys to share what they have."

"But that's our money, Dan. Should we have to work extra hard so that Arianna Rivers can have pocket money?"

"I've got to go to work, Sheila. I'll see you tonight." Dan stood up. Walking over slowly, he kissed Sheila on the forehead.

Sheila left after doing the dishes for the auxiliary meeting. The meeting was the usual chatter, nothing really caught her attention. At 11 a.m. she went to her weekly bridge game.

"Did you know that on my way over here, I saw a woman, at least I think it was a woman dressed in the shortest skirt. It just barely covered anything." She said as her friends, Brenda, Jenni and Paula gathered around the table.

"Oh I know, these young people today. They wear the strangest things and all of them dress like prostitutes. If I had dressed like that my mother would have tanned my backside." Her best friend, Brenda, said taking a seat across from her.

"I had to tell my daughter just the other day to go put on something more decent before she left the house. She came down wearing a jersey. Of all things, a football jersey. It had these huge holes in it. Showed everything. I told her to march right back upstairs and put on some real clothes. I guess I'm going to have to start shopping with her again." Jenni said.

"Makes me glad that we had all boys." Sheila looked at her cards.

"I have five girls in my house. One of them seems to have gotten into some kind of strange band movement. I've told her father to talk to her about it, but he doesn't care. She dyed her hair hot pink with blue streaks. And then she goes to visit an aunt in New York, comes back with her face pierced and a tattoo!" Paula put her cards down.

"Dear me," Sheila looked at her. "What did you do?"

"I made her take out the piercing, luckily the tattoo can be covered and grounded her to the house for three months. I even took away the phone for the first month. But I'll just have to wait for the hair to grow out. She's a blond and went pink, it's permanent color! And her boyfriend is just as bad. I told her father to make her stop seeing him, but he says if we do that, it will just make her more determined to date him. I think he just doesn't want to get involved because the boyfriend is kind of scary looking."

"I have the same problem with Dan. I am always trying to get him to talk to the boys and he just says, 'boys will be boys'. I hate that expression. It's stupid. Boys will only be as rowdy as you let them. I want good boys."

"I heard Cheryl Richmond's oldest girl got pregnant." Jenni almost whispered.

"Oh please don't let that happen to any of mine. That is the worst. Pink hair isn't permanent, children are. And who do you think is going to end up raising it? Cheryl, that's who." Paula bid.

"I'd make my girl marry him if she got pregnant. Make the baby her and the boy's responsibility." Brenda passed.

"None of this happened in my day." Sheila said, starting the game.

Are We Done Yet?

Phillip Davidson sat in a lawn chair and waited. He wasn't sure what he was waiting for, but when it happened he would know. His brothers, Asher and Sean, were playing with a garden hose in the front yard. They were supposed to washing their mother's car, instead they were goofing around. Maybe that's what he was waiting for, his brothers to get in trouble. Sheila, their mother, was going to be furious about the water they were wasting. Each of them would probably get a lecture about the cost of water. He would get lectured for letting them do it, but they wanted to have fun, might as well let them.

The neighbor kids, Tony and Anna Rivers, pulled into the Rivers' driveway. Tony got out, waved and disappeared into the house. Anna on the other hand stood there watching for several minutes before shaking her head and following Tony inside. That's the way it had been for several weeks now. Sheila had finally driven Anna away, using her father's behavior as an excuse. Asher and Sean were both suffering because of it.

Maybe that's what Phil was waiting on, his mother to change, to stop alienating the boys' friends. He knew it would never happen, but it would have been nice. Phil also thought that maybe his father would eventually do something about it, but Dan had kept his mouth shut so far.

"Boys, just what do you think you're doing?" Sheila yelled from the porch.

"Oh shit," Phil mumbled. Sean immediately turned his attention back to the car.

"You can't wash a car without getting a little wet," Asher replied. Ash was the quick one in the family. Quick with his mouth and especially quick to defend his brothers. That was something Sheila had solidified in her children, a feeling of unity. Phil thought it strange that the youngest brother had become the defender, but Ash had taken the job, no questions asked.

"A little wet? You and Sean are both soaked. And you Phil, I expected you to watch them and make sure they were staying on task." His mother swept into his view.

"Their 15 and 16, mom, I shouldn't have to keep an eye on them." Phil protested.

"They may be, but you are 17 and the oldest, that means you are supposed to help keep your brothers in line." Sheila placed her hands on her hips. "Do you have any idea how much our water bill is going to be this month? And for what? So that Sean and Asher could get drenched and then track water and mud into my house?"

"They're just having some fun mom." Phil stood up.

"Just having fun? Well, I'm so sorry I interrupted their fun. By all means, please continue to waste water in the name of fun. Oh and don't forget that my car isn't getting clean in the process. What if I decided to only half clean the house because I was too busy having fun? Who would wash your clothes, cook your meals, clean up after you? Your father isn't going to do it and I know you aren't going to do it." Sheila put out her bottom lip. The argument was over, she was going to go pout until someone apologized or until she got another chance to rip into them. She stomped away.

"Ash," Phil called to him. "Keep your mouth shut tonight, mom is on a rampage and you have a tendency to bring it down on yourself."

Sean walked over with him. His jeans molded to his body, his shirt hung from him like it was two sizes too big. Even his shoes squelched water when he walked.

"Do as he says Ash," Sean said softly.

"Why?" Ash shrugged. "She disapproves of me regardless of whether I say something or not. At least if she's disapproving of me, she leaves you guys alone." Asher looked down at the ground.

"Ash the Martyr," Phil laughed. It was an inside joke between the three of them. "I have a plans with Kathy this weekend. You can both come along if you want." Phil sat back down in his chair.

"I hate crashing your dates with Kathy." Sean smiled.

"Yeah, I know, it's weird to tag along on your dates." Ash punched Sean gently in the arm. Sean returned the punch and before long both boys were wrestling on the lawn.

Anna walked out of her house. Phil waved. She gave a demure wave back. Tony came out the house behind her. Phil waved to him too. Tony motioned him over. Phil ran across the street. Tony shook his hand.

"Hey, Phil. Mom still freaking, huh?" Tony frowned.

"Yeah, you know her. Hey do you guys have plans Saturday night?" Phil smiled and raised an eyebrow at Anna.

"That depends, what are you planning?" Tony asked.

"I have a date with Kathy on Saturday, we're going to the drive-in. I thought that you and Anna could meet us there if you're not busy. I'd have Ash and Sean along with me. You can bring Tiffany, we'll make it a party and no one has to know." Tony had kept Anna pretty close to him since their father had been let out. The judge had given him a slap on the wrist, put him on probation for five years.

"What do you say, Anna? You up for it?" Tony asked.

"What if your mom finds out? I don't want you guys to get into trouble." Anna paled a bit.

"Mom won't find out unless someone tells. I can't think of anyone that would tell. Besides, we've all been in trouble before. At least this time it will be for a good cause." Phil smiled at her.

The Davidson boys all had a very special attachment to Anna. She'd been around since she was four. She was the exact same age as Asher, making her two years younger than Phil. Anna was blossoming into a beautiful young woman before their very eyes. When Phil was single, he had a tendency to develop a crush on the girl so he avoided being single for very long.

"Thanks, Phil, but I can't, I don't want to risk it. One of your mom's friends could see you or something." Anna looked down at the ground. Tony wrapped an arm around her.

"Come on Anna, it'll be fun and I know Sean and Ash will love the idea. Hell, Ash will love it just because he's not supposed to do it. And Sean never stays in trouble for very long, mom will unground him in less than a day. But all that's if we get caught."

"I'm game," Tony hugged her and stepped away. "Come on, sis, it'll be fun."

"I see Ash everyday at school. There's no reason for it." Anna turned from them.

"Yes, but how much fun do you get to have at school? Besides, Tony's leaving in a month and it will be one of the few chances we get to go out and do something." Phil knew if he talked long enough, Anna would give in. Tony was going into the army immediately after graduation. He had been planning it for a while now and he only had a month to go. Phil admired his courage, but knew that Tony was having second thoughts. Anna however, didn't and Tony didn't want her to know.

"Come on, Arianna, it will be a great way to get let go," Tony cajoled her.

"Tony, you aren't supposed to encourage disobedience in the Davidson' boys. You know they're impressionable." Anna smiled at Phil. "Fine I guess we'll go."

"Excellent. Meet us for pizza first at Mario's Pizzeria, then we'll head to the movies." Phil dashed across the street. He told Ash and Sean the plan. They immediately wanted to go. Phil applauded himself for the idea. Of course, if Sheila found out there would be hell to pay in the Davidson' household, but Phil didn't mind.

"Well, I decided not to goof off and fixed dinner if anyone cares." Sheila yelled from the house.

The boys' rolled their eyes and straggled into the house. Sean and Ash were sent to change while Dan and Phil washed up in the kitchen sink. They all sat down to dinner. Dan leading the prayer.

"Thank you heavenly father for the food we are about to receive and continue to bless us. Amen." Dan grabbed the bowl of mashed potatoes.

"Phil, did I see you across the street just now?" Sheila asked.

"Yeah, I was talking to Tony." Phil took the plate of corn and passed it to Sean. "Tony is leaving in a month for the Army. I wanted to make sure I got to say good-bye."

"The army will be good for that boy." Sheila took the potatoes from Dan.

"Can we not do this?" Phil looked up at her angry.

"Do what?" Sheila met his gaze and mustered an offended look.

"This! Every night you run someone into the ground, every night the four of us sit here like statues and listen to the abuses you lay on some undeserving person who doesn't fit into your perfect mold. It makes me physically sick to come to the dinner table." Phil pushed his plate away.

"Dan are you going to let your son talk to me that way?" Sheila yanked on Dan's arm.

"Phil, don't talk to your mother that way," Dan took a bite of his casserole.

"Oh yes, thank you Dan, that's really going to work." Sheila's voice went up an octave.

"Shut up, mom." Asher shook his head and pushed his plate away. "This entire family is miserable and it's pretty much your fault."

"My fault?" Sheila's voice went from normal to shrill. "How dare you say that to me Asher Gabriel Davidson. You are done with dinner. Go to your room."

"No problem, but first I have something I want to say. Phil's right, every night you heap insults on one of our friends or girlfriends. Sean is so worried about what you'll think of his girlfriends that he refuses to tell you that he has one. I stopped bringing home guys from school ages ago because the moment they left you gave me a lecture about everything that was wrong with them." Asher shoved his chair under the table. It hit with such force that it ricocheted and crashed to the floor. Ash left it and went to his room.

"Dan, what are you going to do about this?" Sheila demanded.

"The boys have a point, dear. You've chased away Ash's closest friend, you can't find anything nice to say about Kathy and I doubt you even know any of Sean's friends by name. You refer to them as 'that boy'."

"Well, I never." Sheila stood up.

"No, mom, I bet you haven't, you've always been too busy spewing shit about other people to take a look at your own life. You're never happy with us. Ever. Sean can't groom himself to your standards, Asher can't keep his behavior to your standards and I can't ever make a decision that makes you happy. You complain about everybody and everything. Like today, how much do you really think the water bill was raised by Sean and Asher playing around? Three cents? Four cents? I'd be willing to bet that it didn't actually raise your water bill any at all. And Dad is always expected to take your side, but he never does because most of the time you're wrong!" Phil stood up. Standing, Phil towered over his mother. She was just barely five foot and Phil was six foot six inches. All the boys were tall, but none taller than Phil.

"You get to your room right now, young man. And don't come down until morning." Sheila spat at him.

"No, I'm not done. My brothers mope around all the time and you pretend like you don't notice." Phil waited for a response and got none. "They mope because you've banned the neighbor kids from the house. Hell even I'm starting to miss Anna. Tony leaves in a month and you tell me I can't go out and celebrate with him. Arianna is Asher's best friend and you've banned her. Why? Because her family can't meet your expectations which are ridiculously high. Your own family can't meet your expectations. Do you honestly think we have a well adjusted family? Are you really that delusional? Asher's fifteen and we make jokes about him being a martyr. Sadly, there's a lot of truth to the joke. Asher purposely gets in trouble so that you won't have time to yell at Sean or I. Sean wanted to go out for baseball, you wouldn't let him because organized sports are barbaric. You said they taught violence and encouraged drug use. Well guess what mom, to live in this house, drugs are almost mandatory. Instead, Sean has buried himself into books and cars. The saddest part is that I bet you can't even tell me what kind of books Sean likes to read. I'm counting the days until I can go to college. I intend to get as far away from New Orleans as possible! I may end up going to college in Maine or maybe Alaska because I know you won't visit me there. My last two girlfriends have broken up with me because you hated them and let them know it."

Tears spilled from Sheila's eyes, "oh, so I guess I'm the bad guy for wanting my boys to succeed. I guess I should just let you run all over the place like wild children."

"Give it a rest, Sheila." Dan pushed from the table.

"I guess no one in this house really loves me, I'll just go, but you won't last two minutes without me." Sheila went into the living room.

"Take Asher a plate of food and go eat in your rooms," Dan sighed. "Phil," Dan shook his head. "I should have said it a long time ago, I'm sorry. As of now, Anna and Tony are both allowed back in the house."

"What about mom?" Sean asked, filling a plate for Ash.

"She'll get over it and if she doesn't I'll talk to her again." Dan left the room.

Phil grabbed a serving tray from the cabinets. He placed their drinks on the tray, grabbed his plate and followed Sean upstairs. Sean knocked softly on Ash's door.

"Go away," Ash responded.

"It's Sean and Phil, let us in." They listened as Ash unlocked the door.

"I figured it was either mom or dad." Asher opened the door, letting them both in. They locked the door back behind them.

"You missed the fun," Sean set the plates on Ash's desk. "Phil really laid into her. Dad lifted the ban on Anna and Tony. Guess we won't have to sneak to the drive-in to see them." Sean smiled and wrinkled his nose. "Although that does make it a little less exciting."

"Best to hang out with Anna at her house for a while." Phil handed Asher one of the drinks.

"I could hear it." Asher sat down on the bed with his plate. "It's about time someone told her. How grounded are you?" Ash looked at Phil.

"Probably more than I can imagine. I doubt I will be going to the movies with anyone this weekend." Phil tilted his head to one side. "Although, I know another way to get in trouble."

"I'm all ears," Ash smiled.

"After we finish dinner we can sneak out the window and head over to Anna's. Tell her the good news."

"I'm in," both Asher and Sean said. They busted out laughing.

"Why wait? The food sucks." Ash put his plate down and opened his window. Asher had the only window in the house that you could sneak out of. It overlooked the roof over the front door. Once you got onto the roof, you could swing your legs over and shimmy down the porch supports.

The boys climbed out and down, making as little noise as possible. They dashed across the road and knocked on the Rivers' door. Heather, Anna's mother answered the door. She looked at the boys standing on the porch, checking over their shoulders.

"You boys aren't supposed to be here by order of your mother." Heather smiled.

"Yeah, the ban kind of got lifted tonight, it's a long story. Can we come inside?" Phil glanced over his shoulder again.

"You snuck out?" Heather opened the door for them. Sean shut it behind him as Heather yelled for her kids.

"What's going on?" Anna asked coming down the stairs. Tony was quick at her heels.

"Phil went berserk tonight, yelled at our mom." Sean smiled at her. "Dad lifted the ban afterwards and sent us all to our rooms."

"Have you guys had dinner?" Heather asked.

"Uh, sort of, we were just sitting down to supper when Phil went nuts." Asher chimed.

"Well, in about two minutes, we are going to be having spaghetti with meatballs. You guys can join us if you want." Heather had gone to culinary school and worked as a chef at some fancy restaurant downtown. She also tended to overcook at home. Rarely did they have a meal without enough leftovers to feed them all three more meals.

"That would be excellent." Asher went into the kitchen behind Heather. Everyone else followed. They set extra places at the table and sat down to eat. Half way through dinner the doorbell rang.

"Busted," Anna said low.

Heather stood up, "I'll see if I can smooth things over. The five of you need to continue to eat. If nothing else you can delay punishment a few more minutes."

The teens could hear Heather talking to someone. Finally, she came back into the kitchen. Dan followed her.

"I've talked to your mom and she's mad, but she'll get over it. I think it would be best if you guys stayed here tonight. I was going to tell you and then come discuss it with Heather, but you beat me over here. Your mother on the other hand thinks that I came to discuss it with Heather before allowing you to leave the house. I recommend you scurry on home and climb back into Asher's room." Dan frowned, "get your things packed and return dishes to the kitchen. Then you guys can come back over. Heather's agreed to let you stay tonight and possibly tomorrow if it's needed."

The three boys stood up from the table and went back to the house. They snuck in through Asher's window and packed overnight bags and back-packs. Dan opened Phil's door.

"Phil, I think you should apologize to your mom. You said what needed to be said, but the situation could have been handled better. I've talked to her and she said she'll try to be less judgmental. Don't expect miracles though. I think the three of you should just be happy that she is willing to back down from the Anna situation."

"Thanks, Dad." Phil shoved a book in his bag. "Especially for backing me on the Anna thing. Asher was going to go insane without her."

"Ash wasn't who I was worried about. He has classes with her." Dan left the room

Phil stood for a moment trying to figure out what his father had meant. Ash and Sean came into his room. He pushed it from his thoughts and joined them as they headed across the street.

Packing had taken less than ten minutes, Heather had kept their dinners warm in the oven. She'd even made sure Anna and Tony had waited before finishing their own food. Heather left the teens in the kitchen to eat without her.

They laughed and joked throughout. Phil noticed when Anna spoke Sean forgot about his food. Dan's parting words finally made sense to him. Sean had a thing for Anna and it was obvious now that he'd bothered to look.

"Are we done yet?" Phil asked after they had gobbled down the spaghetti and sat there for a while talking.

"Are you in a hurry to get away?" Ash raised his eyebrows.

"No, I just keep getting the feeling I'm waiting on something." Phil frowned.

"What are you waiting on?" Anna cocked her head sideways and wrinkled her nose.

"I don't know, something." Phil pushed away from the table. "Besides, it's getting late. Sean and Ash both need showers and we need to figure out where all of us are going to sleep. Plus I still have some homework."

"We have two beds in the spare room." Tony frowned and counted. "One of you will have to either sleep in my room or on the couch."

"I'll take the couch," Phil volunteered. "Even in a full size bed I'm not sure Tony and I would have enough room."

"If that's what you want." They cleaned up the dinner plates. Ash and Sean went to take showers. Phil did homework for about an hour. Finally, Heather made him turn in for the night.

Phil changed quickly in the bathroom before laying down on the couch. He snuggled into his pillow pulling the blankets up to his shoulders. The house was quiet and dark. He still felt like he was waiting for something. The feeling kept him awake. He tossed and turned.

A noise made him sit up in bed. Someone was walking softly over his head. He checked his watch, it was just after midnight. Phil couldn't imagine who would be up.

The steps got closer and he waited. Anna appeared at the bottom of the stairs. Dressed in pajamas and pulling a rob tightly around her, she entered the living room.

"What are you doing up?" He asked her quietly.

"Good, you're awake." She whispered back, taking a seat next to him on the couch. Phil pulled the covers tighter, suddenly aware that he was wearing only sweats.

"What are you doing up?" He asked again.

"I wanted to thank you. I know you helped get me reinstated with your family." She kissed his cheek.

"You should go back to bed. We don't want your mom to find you up wandering around, she might get the wrong idea." Phil moved away a little.

"I don't think my mom would get the wrong idea about you and me. She knows you find me annoying. Tony told us." Anna smiled. "Which is all the more reason to thank you."

"I don't think you're annoying. Go back to bed, Anna." He patted her shoulder.

She kissed him again on the cheek and scurried back up the stairs. The waiting feeling had finally departed. Now all Phil had to do was contend with the crush he felt coming on.

Grease Monkey

Sean was covered from head to toe in grease from Anna's car. The carburetor was sticking and he was supposed to be fixing it. He could hear his brother, Asher, laughing at something, he was pretty sure it was a joke Anna had told. He was also pretty sure that it was at his expense, the girl loved to pick on him. Not that Sean minded much, at least he had her attention some of the time.

Grabbing a rag, he wiped his greasy hands off and walked over to them. She giggled as he approached. He pretended to inspect his hands, trying to not notice her smile or the way she covered her mouth when she tried to stop.

"Hey, Sean, is her car going to be done tonight?" Asher asked him.

"Probably not, why?" Sean sat down next to him.

"Because I need the car to get to school tomorrow," Anna sighed putting her head in her hands.

"You can ride with me. Mom, Dad and Ash leave tonight to go see Phil in Maine. I can stay the night here, I don't have classes until 11 tomorrow morning and I can skip my 3 p.m. class to pick you up." As if they were just waiting for their cue, Sheila and Dan came out.

"Come on, Ash, time to go." Dan yelled. He waved at Anna.

Ash stood up and hugged Anna. He punched his brother in the arm and ran across the street. Sean waved good bye to them. Then it was just him and Anna. Her mother was out until late at a party she was catering. Sean's throat felt dry.

"What were you guys laughing at?" Sean asked.

"You," Anna smiled. "You always look so happy and content when you're under the hood of a car. Are you going to stay in New Orleans for spring break next week or are you and Marsha going somewhere?" Marsha had been Sean's girlfriend since he started college a year earlier. He was getting his engineering degree, she was getting a law degree. It wasn't the greatest match of wits, but it suited them both.

"Marsha's going to the Bahamas, I'm going to stay in New Orleans. I'm getting an apartment after this semester. Actually, I already have the apartment, I can move in this week. I don't want anyone to know though. If mom or Marsha finds out they'll be there trying to control what I do with it. I want it to be my place, decorated my way. It's about three blocks from the French Quarter, you'll have to come check it out." Sean currently lived in the dorms and hated them.

"Sounds cool, then I'll have somewhere to crash after partying." Anna's smile widened. She was only 17, so her idea of partying was different than Sean's. In a couple of months Anna was moving to Indiana to attend Notre Dame. The idea of her leaving filled Sean with dread, he'd had a crush on her for six years.

"Yeah, we'll see," Sean shook his head. "Want to come help?"

"Uh, do you want me to break something?" Anna raised an eyebrow. "I don't know anything about cars."

"There's always time to learn." Sean ducked under the hood.

"I think I'll go do something I'm good at," she headed into the house.

Forty-minutes later she stuck her head back out the door. "Come inside, dinner's ready."

"You didn't have to fix me dinner. I was gonna grab a burger on the way back to campus." Sean was attending the University of Louisiana, New Orleans.

"I wanted to, besides you said you weren't going to campus, you were going to run me to school tomorrow and then pick me up." Anna tugged him into the house using his shirt. "Go wash up, its payment for looking at my car." Sean had a passion for cars and refused to charge Anna for the work he did. He also refused to let her take to a mechanic unless he absolutely couldn't fix it.

Sean washed his hands in the kitchen sink and dried them on paper towels. Anna had set a shirt out for him as well. He examined it, it was his shirt. He wondered how long she had had it, because he couldn't remember when he'd lost it. Sean changed in the kitchen as Anna set dinner on the table.

"Sorry, this about the extent of my cooking. It's nothing fancy like my mom cooks, but it'll be edible."

Sean surveyed the food. She had fixed baked potatoes, salad and KC strip steak. It smelled and looked wonderful. He waited for her to sit down before grabbing a steak.

"That one's mine, it's the smallest one we had," she stabbed it off his plate and gave him the other.

They ate and made small talk. Mostly about school, Asher and life in general. Tony was at Fort Benning. He was planning a return trip before Anna ran away to Indiana. Sean was looking forward to that almost as much as he was dreading Anna's leaving.

Together they did dishes. He looked outside, the sun was starting to set.

"I need to get the hood down on your car and take a shower." Sean sighed, his time alone with her was drawing to an end. At least for tonight, he'd come back and tinker on the car again tomorrow night. Tomorrow night he'd have to fix it regardless, he wouldn't be able to delay it any longer. Anna would demand to take it to a shop on Saturday and Sean's handiwork would be uncovered.

"All right," Anna frowned. "I rented some movies, if you want you can watch them with me."

"What did you rent?" Sean didn't really care, he'd watch it regardless.

"Silence of the Lambs and House on Haunted Hill with Vincent Price."

"Sounds good, I'll come back when I'm done showering."

"Ok."

Sean took his shower feeling a little guilty. He'd purposely not fixed Anna's car, more than that, he was blowing off three classes so that he could chauffer her around. If Marsha found out she would have a hissy fit. Not that that would bother Sean, he was just counting the days until Marsha ditched him. He hoped it would be soon.

Locking the door behind him, he returned to Anna's house. She had fixed popcorn and sat curled up on the couch reading a book. Sean didn't knock and she didn't hear him come in. He watched her for a minute before saying anything.

"Ready?" He asked. He examined his hands, still dirty. No matter how much scrubbing he did, his hands always looked dirty, too much time under the hoods of cars.

"Yep," Anna put the book away. "I hope you don't mind, I put House on Haunted Hill in first."

"Nope," he took a seat next to her.

"Popcorn?" She held the bowl out to him. He stole another look at his hands. "Sean, your hands always look like that, if it hasn't killed you yet I doubt it will kill me." She shoved the popcorn at him. He took a handful, shoving it into his mouth. "Just part of being a grease monkey I guess." She giggled.

"Yeah, something like that." They watched the movie in relative silence. When it finished Sean checked his watch. Almost ten p.m. "I should go, it's getting late."

"But we have another movie to watch." Anna stood up, ejected the tape and put the second one in as the phone rang. "Damn."

She answered it and listened for several minutes before saying anything.

"Yeah, sure. Sean didn't get my car fixed, we're watching movies right now. He said he'd give me a ride to school and pick me up tomorrow. So I think I've got it covered." She was silent for another minute. "I'm sure he will, love you too mom." She hung up the phone.

"What was that about?" Sean asked hoping she wouldn't think he was too nosy.

"My mom is going to stay in Baton Rouge tonight. Wanted to make sure I was going to be ok by myself." Anna sat back down and pushed play.

"Are you going to be all right by yourself?" Sean asked.

"No, that's why you're staying." Anna smiled and turned her attention back to the TV.

"What do you mean, I'm staying?" Sean hit the stop button, his pulse racing. Suddenly he had clammy hands and breathing difficulties. He was pretty sure a panic attack was in his near future.

"She asked if you would stay and I said yes," Anna frowned. "Will you stay?"

"Yeah, is it really ok with Heather?"

"Mom really doesn't care if one of you guys stay. You've been in and out of the house for a million years. Anything that was going to happen, would have happened by now." Anna shrugged, pushing the play button.

"Wait," Sean stopped it again. "What does that mean? Anything that was going to happen would have happened by now?"

"Oh come on, Sean, how much time have we spent alone together? What about me and Phil?"

"What about you and Asher?" Sean was silently thoughtful for a moment.

"Ash's different, he's not into girls." Anna smiled. "I'm just waiting for him to realize that."

"You think Asher's gay?"

"No, I know he is, but you can't tell him. He has to figure it out for himself." Anna wrinkled her nose. "Can I start the movie now?"

"Not yet," Sean took the remotes from her. "Has Phil ever put moves on you?"

"Yeah, right, with as much as I annoyed him when I was younger. Two years ago though, when you guys stayed the night because of that big fight with your mom. I snuck downstairs and kissed his cheek. Twice. It's the closest Phil and I ever came to anything." She giggled again. "Kind of embarrassing to admit."

"Did you have a crush on Phil when you were younger?" Sean was getting concerned and was still convinced he was on the verge of a panic attack.

"Never," Anna stared at him. "Why?"

"Just wondering." Sean pushed play on the remote.

"No, tell me," she hit the stop button. Sean wanted to crawl under the couch and die, he'd walked right into that.

"Because you said that it was embarrassing. I just assumed you did it because you had a crush on him."

"Not hardly, Phil was too much like Tony for me to get a crush on. He was more like an older brother."

"What about Ash?" Sean decided to make the best of the situation.

"Asher's like my twin. We've been joined at the hip since we were five. I had a small crush on him when we were in like fifth grade, but by the time we were in eighth grade, I'd figured out he was gay." She started the movie.

Sean flipped it off.

"We are never going to get this movie watched," Anna colored slightly. "Don't ask your next question."

"How do you know what my next question is?" Sean watched her color deepen.

"Because you've asked about your brothers, the only person left is you." Anna started the movie.

Sean stopped it again. "Do you still have a crush on me?"

"How do you know I ever had one?"

"You're blushing, you didn't blush with the others." Sean smiled, the threat of a panic attack seemed to be decreasing.

"Can we please watch the movie?" Anna started the movie.

"That's a yes. When do you leave for Indiana?"

"In August." Anna wouldn't look at him.

"Would it make you feel any better if I told you that I had one on you and have had for about six years?"

"Probably not," Anna turned the volume up on the TV.

Sean hit the button on the remote. "Anna," he said her name softly.

Finally she turned to look at him. "What Sean?" She was trying for flippant and failed. Even Sean could see she was uncomfortable.

"I should go," he paused. "I should go to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

"You can have Tony's old room." Anna showed him to the room and left him.

Sean lay in bed staring at the ceiling for a long time. He could hear Anna moving around in the room next door. Probably he should undress, but he also felt like he needed to apologize. He had made her very uncomfortable and it broke his heart. Finally he got up. He knocked on her door.

Anna opened the door slowly, but all the way. She stood there in an oversized shirt that Sean knew belonged to Tony.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that earlier." He turned.

"Sean, wait," she came into the hall touching his shoulder. "I shouldn't have gotten so defensive. It's just I leave in a couple of months and Asher's moving to Boston, your parents are moving to Oregon. What if I never see you again? You shouldn't have waited so long to tell me. I would have gladly dated you in high school, but now...I mean it's a little late. Plus, you're dating someone."

"I always figured you had a thing for Ash," Sean moved into her touch, turning his body against hers. Her hand ended up on his chest. "Always figured the two of you would end up together." He lowered his head, touching his lips to her..

Anna relaxed into his arms, letting him pull her deeper into the kiss. He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her. She didn't protest, she kissed him deeper. Sean took her back into her room and gently placed her on the bed.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." Sean stood up.

"Don't go," Anna touched his face. "I, uh, I have thought of this several times. What it would be like to get you inside my room. Never thought it would happen."

"Are you sure?" Sean sat down on her bed.

"Yes, I'm sure, Sean."

"Are you really sure about this?"

"Yes, I developed a crush on you when I was thirteen. Never grew out of it. Never could do anything about it either, until now." She blushed again. Sean moved closer, stroking her face. He leaned in, pulled her to him and kissed her.

"Come stay with me," Sean pulled back from her.

"Come stay with you? Where? When?"

"We have an entire week without anyone around. You could help me move in, get settled. It'd be fun and I would love to hang out with you this week. When you get bored, you can always come back. Besides, you live in suburbia, might be cool to come stay in the city for a week."

"Yeah right and when Marsha or your parents call what are you going to tell them? That your still hanging out in the dorm?"

"No one's going to call this week. My family will be busy with Phil and Marsha will be busy doing whatever Marsha does. Probably trying to figure out a way to take over the world." Sean felt bitter and trapped.

"Sean, what would we do after that week?" Anna frowned at him.

"I could leave Marsha."

"I'll be in northern Indiana, a thousand miles away, will I really be able to hold your attention that far from here?"

Sean sighed, "no, probably not for long. Then come spend the week with me as my friend. It'll be the last chance we get to spend that much time together. You'd get out of the suburbs, have an idea of being at Notre Dame is like and I could use some help moving stuff. There's a cute little café just down the street from my apartment."

"Sean, you'll always be a little more than a friend in my estimation. Besides, it won't be the last time. It's New Orleans, the party city, I will be here for spring break every year, hanging out with my mom and Tony. I also intend to come back for Mardi Gras once in a while. We'll see each other then as well. I'm also dragging Asher's ass with me when I come back to visit. We'll have chances to see each other." She hugged him. "I'll go with you to the city this week. I've got to clear it with mom, but if I tell her I'm helping you move and don't want the forty minute drive, one way, everyday, she'll let me go. Besides, it's you and not some strange axe murderer." Anna snuggled down into the bed. "Good night, Sean."

"Night Anna." Sean turned off her light and exited the bedroom. She would come with him, he had no doubt. What he didn't know was whether he could be alone with her for a week and be just her friend.

A Bachelor's Life

"It's a surprise Sean, you can't take the blindfold off until we get there," Phil tugged him by the hand.

"I hate surprises." Sean grumbled.

"Doesn't matter," Phil shrugged, realized Sean couldn't see it and continued. "We all like surprises and this is going to be one damn fine surprise. You didn't honestly think Ash and I would let you get married without a proper bachelor's party. Did you?"

Ash and Phil guided Sean up the stairs.

"We spent weeks putting this thing together, now we finally get to enjoy it." Asher laughed. "Some of us more than others. You probably least of all."

"Oh shit, what are you guys dragging me to?" Sean moaned.

"Well, you see, Marsha's out tonight doing the whole bridal shower/bachelorette thing, so we don't have to worry about her crashing your party. We spared no expense, hired the finest New Orleans caterer, flew in a bartender and grabbed a couple of party favors. Now, we are going to celebrate your upcoming marriage and we are going to do it in style." Phil pushed open the door, Ash turned on the lights.

"Drum roll please," Phil yanked the blindfold off. About two dozen of Sean's friends stood in the nearly empty hall. On the back wall stood a buffet table and off to the side was a mini-bar setup. They had even grabbed a huge stereo system for music. Phil was impressed, it had come together better than he anticipated, much better than he'd hoped.

"Now, here are the rules," Ash clapped Sean on the back as he went to stand by Phil. "There is no driving. We rented this hall specifically because it's within walking distance of the hotel. There is no complaining. We did this for you, so pretend to appreciate it." Asher grinned.

"Number three, you can't talk about the bride to be, it's your night, not hers," Phil continued. "Number four, the chef is allowed to beat you severely if you complain about the food, so don't. Number five, looks are deceiving, that really is a fully functional bar. Number six, it's your night have fun. The rest of us are at your mercy until 10 p.m. At ten, we all turn into pumpkins."

"Wow, I can't believe you did all this. Thanks guys." Sean hugged them. He began making rounds, talking to everyone there. Phil slipped away into the kitchen.

"How's it coming?" He asked.

"Not bad, should be ready to set in about 10 minutes, you guys were a little early." Heather poured dirty rice into a giant bowl and checked the staff. "I have three waiters and a bartender, I think we're good."

"And what a lovely bartender she is." Phil hugged Anna. He hadn't seen her since she left for Notre Dame five years earlier. "I hope she mixes drinks as well as she says otherwise that crowd will mistake her for the stripper."

"Strippers make better money," Anna poked him in the ribs. "Just remember, I'm doing this as a favor for you, you owe me big."

"I remember, thank you for doing it. However, you are the only bartender I know who would take the night off to do a bachelor party."

"Hey we have a bartender on staff," Heather poked him in the back. "I said you could have him."

"Yeah, but he was going to do nothing but complain because we aren't tipping the bartender tonight. It's a flat fee." Phil hugged Heather too.

"Wait, you were going to pay someone?" Anna laughed. "Here Asher has me doing it for free."

"You wait, Ash is still in college, so I'm footing most of this bill. You would have laughed if I offered you money, it wasn't much. Just keep thinking about all those times Sean fixed your car for free and the huge favor I'm going to owe you by the end of it and smile. That's more money than your worth," Phil joked.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. So am I supposed to set up after dinner or during?"

"Set up during dinner, but don't serve drinks until afterwards. I don't want these guys slobbering drunk before the strippers get here."

"Oh, I am so out of here before then," Heather laughed. "My poor daughter, she gets to suffer through that."

Anna smacked Heather on the butt as she walked past. Phil shook his head, laughing. It was definitely going to be an interesting night.

"Is there something I'm not getting?" Phil asked.

"He doesn't know?" Heather laughed louder, her whole body shaking.

"I know she's a bartender." Phil felt confused. "Is there more?"

"She's a bartender all right, but she tends bar at a topless 'gentlemen's club'. I can't believe Ash didn't tell you." Heather touched Anna's hand.

"I'm not topless, just the dancers and they don't allow full nudity." Anna stuck out her lip.

"Damn, I have got to get to Indiana to see you." Phil chuckled. "These are the things Ash doesn't tell me. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go kick his ass for not telling me. We could have had Anna bring the strippers and probably gotten them dirt cheap."

Phil left the back and joined the crowd. Sean was grinning from ear to ear. Beside him, Asher was telling a story about the younger days. Phil remembered the story pretty well, but he sidled up to Ash anyway. He wanted to listen. It had been awhile since they had all been together. They talked on the phone all the time, but three brothers in three states made visits difficult. The past two years they hadn't even managed Christmas's together.

"...so after that, Sean stood up and looked around. Phil and I had already run for it. Mom stomped out onto the lawn to see what the ruckus was and she finds Sean, half naked..."

"No, that boy was entirely naked," Heather yelled from the back. "Tell the story right Ash."

"Sorry, Heather, I'll try." Ash yelled back. "Ok, I was going to save him some dignity, but Heather put a stop to that. Tony had stolen Sean's boxers. So there was Sean, completely naked, standing in the front yard. One of the neighbors calls the police reports him for indecent exposure. They send units to the house. Well, the police show up, but Dad's already got Sean in the house and getting clothes on him. Mom answers the door and tries to sweet talk the officers. The officers come in to investigate. Mom freaks out. She's yelling at Phil and me for daring him to do it. She's yelling at Sean for taking the dare. Mom got so loud, the cops arrest her for disturbing the peace. Dad steps in, begging for forgiveness and what-not and the officer looks dead at him and says, 'Sir, it's Mardi Gras and it's hard to keep kids clothed during Mardi Gras. However your wife is making a huge scene and we can hear her yelling outside. That is a peace disturbance and she will be prosecuted for it.' They took her away in handcuffs, the rest of us were just told not to do it again. Mom made all three of us go stay next door with Heather for the night so she wouldn't kill us."

The group busted out laughing, everyone imaging Sheila getting arrested. Phil watched as Anna sidled up to the group. Sean looked like someone had just run over him. Phil wasn't sure whether it was Anna's appearance or the story.

"Woo-hoo, strippers before dinner." Someone yelled.

"She is not the stripper," Phil grabbed her hand, pulling her towards him. "She's the bartender. We have provided beer, soda, tea and water for dinner. Anything stronger, Anna will gladly make you after dinner." Phil leaned into her, "might not be a bad idea to keep an eye on these guys. They might get grabby once the strippers do arrive," he whispered.

"I can handle them." Anna smiled. "If it gets too bad though, I'm going home with you."

"I'm not sure Sarah will like that." Phil teased.

"I've never met Sarah, so I can't say what she will or will not like. Dinner's ready if you want to try and compel these guys to the tables."

"MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!" Phil yelled over the talking. The place quieted down. Even he was impressed. "Please proceed to the back tables, dinner is served."

Phil waited until everyone was back getting plates filled to give any thought to getting his own food. He joined the line. Dinner looked superb. Heather had outdone herself immensely. The choices seemed nearly endless. Everyone would find something they liked, Phil thought. He poked Asher in the back to get him moving. Ash gave him the finger but moved forward down the line.

The tables were close enough together that they didn't have any problems hearing each other. Asher continued to regale the table with stories of their youth. Phil listened and watched. That was what Phil liked to do, watch everyone interact. He had been shoved in between Asher and Anna, which meant that they would probably talk over him once Ash ran out of tales to tell. That would be irksome, he prayed Ash didn't run out. Anna finished first, wolfing down her food so fast Phil wondered if she had tasted any of it.

She stood up, dumped her plate and headed to the bar. Ready to serve their drinks. It reassured Phil to have her there. He felt he was losing his brother, her presence seemed to solidify the three boys again. Proved that things never really changed. He wanted to believe that.

"Gentlemen, I believe the bar is officially open for business," Phil stood up. Tossing his plate in the trash he headed over.

"I'd like a whiskey sour, heavy on the whiskey." Phil told her.

Anna mixed the drink like a professional. When she finished, she put it down on the bar. "Here's your drink, that will be $6.50." She smiled at the joke and slide him the glass.

Phil gulped the liquor down and set the tumbler on the bar. "Another, please."

"If you drink this one that fast we'll be carrying you to the hotel room." Sean patted his brother's back. "I'll take a kamikaze."

Anna mixed both drinks and handed them to the boys. Phil was pretty impressed with her skills. He had never thought of her as a bartender, but he supposed everyone needed a job. He had to move away with his drink as the others came forward with orders.

"Well, what do you think?" He asked Sean, studying Sean's face.

"I think this could be fun. What's next?"

"Whatever you want," Phil spread his arms wide.

"Could you be more specific?" Sean was frowning.

"What's wrong with you? It's your party. If you want to open presents next we can do that."

"There are presents?" Sean's frown deepened.

"Yes, we decided the bride shouldn't be the only one to get gifts." Phil stared at him. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"I have," Sean tilted the kamikaze and drained the glass. He went back towards the bar. Phil grabbed Asher.

"What's wrong with Sean?"

"What isn't wrong with Sean," Asher replied. "Why?"

"I asked him if he'd seen a ghost and he said he had. Not exactly what I was expecting. He doesn't seem to be having much fun."

"If you were marrying Marsha in two days would you be having much fun?" Asher laughed. Phil frowned.

"I'm serious, Ash."

"Give him time to warm up to the idea that tonight is about him. I don't think he's had a night out with the guys in a very very long time." Asher set his drink down. "I think we should do the gifts next. That will take up most of the time until the strippers get here. Believe it or not, most of these guys did an excellent job with gifts. I know one guy brought in three packages. I can't believe he's getting married."

"Me either, to tell you the truth I figured he'd end up a lifelong bachelor."

"Like you?" Ash smiled and punched him in the shoulder.

"Yeah, like me, only without the constant stream of girls in my life." Phil set is drink on the table nearest him. "Are you feeling better about the wedding?"

"No, are you?"

"No, not really. I just keep hoping he'll come to his senses before then."

"We could probably find a pro to go home with him. We'll have Anna mix his drinks really strong, then send him home with a hooker. We could even take pictures and show them to Marsha."

"I don't think so, Asher. Who knows, maybe we're wrong about Marsha." He grabbed his drink. "Let's see if we can actually make this a party."

Climbing onto the raised platform, Phil looked over the CDs. He'd grabbed all the CDs he could get from Asher, Anna and himself. Even the friends had brought CDs. He had a wide selection but knew where to start. Anna and Sean had the same taste in music, hard. Anna's CDs would be the most played. The CD changer had space for ten CDs and he filled them with a variety, relying heavily on hers. Then he set it to shuffle. It would jump CDs and tracks for quite some time. That would leave him free to make rounds.

"Wait, wait, wait," Asher climbed the platform and turned the music down. "Before we get into all that, I would like to read a poem and propose a toast." Ash dug out a sheet of paper. "Okay, I wrote this poem myself, so bare with me. It's titled...well I don't know yet." He cleared his throat. Phil took a seat. Asher had weird poetry, but he could suffer through it.

"As we look down the road, waiting for tomorrow, remembering yesterday, the road looks long and winding, impassable at best, but holding hands, side by side, we are capable of anything. And even when we aren't together, separated by land or water, you are always in my heart, as a brother should be." Ash folded the sheet of paper and put it back in his pocket. "Congratulations, brother, I hope that your dreams are made true. I wish you luck with your new wife and your new life. Phil and I," Asher looked at him. "Phil, get up here."

Phil didn't want to, but he got up next to Asher on the platform.

"Better," Ash looked around, "Phil and I are your brothers, bound by blood and strengthened with love. It doesn't matter where we are or what we're doing, we will always be here for you. And as you start the next phase of life, it is with love and support that Phil and I both wish you the best."

Phil stepped down. The poem hadn't been as bad as some of Ash's, but it hadn't been good either. The toast had been better. Phil hugged Sean.

"I hate Ash's poetry," Sean whispered.

"We all do, but don't tell him," Phil whispered back. "Just go thank him, hug him and get to opening your presents."

Plausible Deniability

Asher picked up his phone and then set it back down. He needed to call her, needed to tell her. His nervousness was ridiculous, she wouldn't care all that much. He picked the phone up again. This should be done in person, not over the phone, not a thousand miles apart. He replaced it in the receiver. The weekend was free, he could fly to Indiana, it wasn't that far from Boston. Just a hop, skip and a jump really.

The duffel bag was in his closet, he pulled it out and filled it with clothes. Not too much, but enough to last more than two days in case he had a melt-down. He took a deep breath too calm his nerves. Nervousness was not something he expected. Hysteria maybe, but not nervousness. There hadn't been any warning signs. It had crept up on him, scaring the living daylights out him and then becoming part of him. Now all he had to do was tell everyone. Anna was the first step. Once he told her, he could face everyone else, if she went with him that is.

The Internet made finding emergency flights easy. He grabbed the first plane to Indiana. It left in three hours. Grabbing the cell phone, he dashed from the house, locked it up tight. She answered on the third ring.

"Hello?" Anna's voice sounded good to Ash. It had been a while since he'd talked to her.

"It's Ash. I know it's sudden, but I really need to see you this weekend. I'm flying to you, should be there in less than six hours." He checked his watch.

"Ash, what's wrong?" He could hear the tension in Anna's voice. He couldn't tell her over the phone.

"Something's come up is all and I really need to see you to tell you. Don't worry, I'm not hurt, injured or dying. Can you pick me up from the airport?"

"Of course, give me your flight info."

Asher could hear Anna scribbling as he gave it to her. He hung up, parked in long term parking and dashed to the plane. It was just starting to load as he entered the terminal.

The flight was murder. He spent the entire time dancing in his seat, anxiety. A little girl next to him gave him strange looks until her mother switched her seats. The woman began giving him the looks instead. The plane landed and he was one of the first ones off of it. He searched for Anna, found her and his anxiety melted away. Anna rushed to him, hugged him, pulling him close, she kissed his cheek.

"Ash, we have really got to get together more. It's been months since I've seen you." Anna let go.

"I know, come on, I have something I need to tell you, but let's wait until we are at your apartment."

"You keep saying that, you have me really worried."

"I'm sorry, Anna, but I want to wait until you're sitting down."

"You're not going to confess that you actually hate Nine Inch Nails and just pretend to like them because I do?" Anna smiled

"No, although now that you mention it, I'm not real fond of Nine Inch Nails. That's always been more you and Sean. You both like angry, hard rock music. I'm more of a Celine Dion fan."

"That's just so wrong," Anna rolled her eyes as he shoved his bags in the back of her car. "You put Celine Dion in my CD player and I'll let you walk to my apartment."

"You may decide to do that yet." Asher groaned as they left the parking lot. Anna was kind enough to turn down the Nine Inch Nails that she was listening to, but she didn't turn it off completely.

They huddled on her couch, sitting cross-legged, ankles folded under legs, staring at each other. Anna was waiting for Asher to tell her his news. Asher knew she was waiting, but couldn't figure out a good way to start.

"All right, I'm just gonna blurt it out and you can decide where to go from there. Ok?"

"Fine, just get on with it. You've got me so anxious my stomach hurts."

"I'm gay." Asher closed his eyes.

"Is that it?" Anna touched his arm.

"Yes, that's it." He opened his eyes and looked at her.

"You had me freaking out because of that?" Anna sighed. "I'm sorry, I know it's important, but I already knew that. I've known that since we were about 15, Ash. I've just been waiting for you to realize it."

"Are you serious?" Asher asked was confused. "But I was dating girls in high school. And I'm not exactly flaming."

"You don't have to be flaming to put off vibes. The girls were a phase, you weren't happy with any of them and by the time we graduated you had stopped dating entirely. The signs were there, I just read them." Anna bit her lower lip.

"And?" Asher could tell she was hiding something.

"I kind of told Sean."

"When did you tell Sean?"

"The week you went to visit Phil in Maine our senior year of high school."

"You couldn't have, Sean spent that spring break in the Bahamas with Marsha." Asher frowned at her.

"I told him shortly after you left that Thursday night." Anna was also frowning, her face pinched up. She always got that look when talking about Marsha. "What'd Sean think of the Bahamas?" Her eyes narrowed.

"Is there something I don't know?" Asher asked her.

Her face suddenly changed, going back to normal. "Of course not, Ash, you're my best friend."

"Wait maybe I have my spring breaks mixed up. Sean didn't get the apartment until June of our senior year. Is this the spring break where you lost your virginity or the first spring break Sean spent in the apartment? Did Marsha go to the Bahamas the spring break that I was in Boston? No, I'm pretty sure it was the spring break I was in high school." Asher shook his head, "Shit, I don't know. What is it that you aren't telling?"

"Um, don't know what you're talking about."

"You're a bad liar, Arianna. I've confessed, now you have to."

"Damn, I didn't know he told you guys he went to the Bahamas. Sean got the apartment in early March, but he didn't want to tell anyone because he was afraid Marsha and his mom would want to decorate it. Spring break of our senior year was the first weekend he spent in the apartment."

The wheels in Asher's head turned, puzzle pieces were starting to fall into place. He got the biggest, goofiest grin and couldn't do anything about it. Asher leaned back and stared at the ceiling waiting for the smile to dissipate.

"What's so funny?" Anna's voice sounded less than amused.

"You spent that week with him." He made it a statement, he didn't need her to confirm it. He already knew.

"Um, did you forget he was dating Marsha that year?"

"No, I didn't forget. Doesn't change the fact. I can see now why you were so against telling me who the guy was."

"Okay, Ash, have a good laugh. Get it out of your system." Anna sat quietly.

"I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you. I think it's perfect. I think we should fly to New Orleans and tell Marsha. Maybe they'd call off the wedding and my brother would be saved from the horrible fate he now faces."

"Speaking of flying, are you going to tell your parents over the phone or in person?"

"In person, we've got to go to New Orleans in a few weeks to attend Sean's wedding. I figure I'll tell them then. You, however, I felt I needed to tell immediately." Asher snorted through his nose, "I can't believe you finally hook up with Sean and now he's marrying someone else. Man, I always figured you two would end up together."

"Yeah, well I was going off to college and he was in a serious relationship. We spent the week together and then went back to our normal lives." Anna sounded sad, sadder than Ash had heard her in ages.

"You still have a thing for him." He knew the answer, but saying it out loud solidified it.

"Yeah, I still have a thing for him. Obviously not meant to be though. So are you dating any one?"

"Not yet, but there's a guy I'd like to be dating." Asher sighed. "I guess I always had a clue, but ignored it. Until I met Greg anyway."

They spent the rest of the evening talking about Greg. Asher decided to give Sean a call before going to bed. The phone rang four times before a woman answered.

"Marsha, it's Ash. I need to talk to Sean. It's really important."

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" Marsha nearly yelled at him. Asher could hear Sean in the background asking who was on the phone.

"I know, but it's important." Asher wasn't going to beg, he'd just hang up on the bitch and call back in a few minutes. It wasn't a big secret that he hated her, had always hated her.

"Whatever," he heard the phone being shuffled, then Sean's sleepy voice came on the line.

"Hiya, Sean," Asher was thrilled to hear Sean. Their relationship had been strained since he took to dating Marsha.

"Hey, Ash, what's wrong?"

"Well a couple of things really. First can you move somewhere to talk?"

"Yeah, sure," Ash heard Sean mutter something to Marsha and Marsha nearly yell back at him. "Ok, we're good," Sean said after a few minutes.

"Good, I have some good news and a bone to pick with you. Which do you want first?"

"The good news," Sean sighed.

"I'm gay."

"How are you doing?"

"I'm fine with being gay. I'm at Anna's apartment in Indiana. She told me she told you ages ago, so I figured it wouldn't surprise you. I'm waiting until your wedding though to tell everyone else."

"Yeah, she told me," Sean paused, Ash could hear him breathing and wondered what he was thinking about. "I'm happy for you."

"Now, for the issue I have with you. Can you still talk?"

"Yeah, what's up?"

"You had sex with my best friend and neither of you told me for almost five years. I expected better of both of you. I should have been informed earlier than this. You're my brother, how could you not tell me?"

"Ash," Sean was quiet again, if he hadn't been breathing directly into the phone, Ash wouldn't have known he was still there.

"Why are you marrying Marsha?" Asher forged ahead. "No one but mom likes Marsha."

"I couldn't compete with Notre Dame and I sure as hell can't compete with Johns' Hopkins University." Ash heard Sean sigh. "Forget it Ash. I'm glad you came out about being gay. It's nice to admit who you really are. I'll talk to you later." Sean hung up the phone.

Asher did the same thing. He felt guilty for bringing up the Anna thing. He also needed to stop Sean from ruining his life. Dialing by memory he called Phil in Maine.

"Hello?" Phil's voice was thick.

"Sorry to wake you, but I need to talk and you're the only one I could think to call."

"Asher, what's wrong?"

"Everyone keeps asking me that today," Asher shook his head, realized Phil couldn't see it and started talking again. "I think I just made Sean really mad and very sad. I need to rectify it, but I don't know how."

"Sean will get over it, he always does, he never stays mad very long. Especially not at you Ash. Whatever you said about Marsha was probably accurate and I'm still hopeful that he'll call off the wedding."

"Can we crash it?" Asher put his head in the pillow. It smelled of Anna. His thoughts were brought back to Sean.

"We could, but that might take longer for Sean to get over." Ash heard Phil yawn. "What did you do exactly?"

"I can't give you specifics, but Sean cheated on Marsha once. I think he loves the girl that he had the affair with, but he let her go and she went. I think they both regret it. I think Sean is marrying Marsha because he feels like he'll never love again."

"Are you talking about the week he spent in the Bahamas?" Phil was sounding more awake now.

"Kind of," Ash felt like kicking himself.

"I agree, he came back changed. I thought he had found someone too, but he wouldn't go into it. Just kept saying that the Bahamas had been great. Figured he'd hooked up with some beach bunny. Once in a while I wonder how he did it without Marsha discovering it though."

"Well he did and they got hot and heavy for a while. Everything ended when they got back though. Now I'm wondering why he didn't ditch Marsha then and run away with the beach bunny."

"Who knows Ash, I wouldn't bring it up again though. If Sean wants to marry Marsha, we need to try to be supportive. Is that all?"

"No, I'm gay." Ash decided he might as well do it while he had Phil captured.

"Good, you came to terms with it and are you happy?"

"Did everyone know but me?"

"Yeah, I think so. It's not that your obviously gay or a queen or anything, but you definitely tick a few notches on the radar. Did you tell Sean?"

"I've told you, Sean and Anna. I flew all the way to Indiana to tell Anna and she had almost no reaction. I was expecting something, something more than this. Everyone just keeps saying 'I know' and 'are you happy'." Asher felt better even though he was complaining.

"Sorry, Ash, you'll have to wait until you tell our parents to get that reaction. Everyone else is just concerned about your happiness and well being. If you're happy being gay, then we're all happy your gay."

"Huh, still not what I was expecting. But thanks for being supportive. Will you go with me when I tell mom and dad?"

"Sure, I haven't seen you and mom fight in a while. Could be fun. Bring Anna, we'll make it a party. It'll be like old times."

"Anna's my date to the wedding." Ash wasn't entirely sure he wanted to force her to go anymore.

"I figured she was. I'm bringing my new girlfriend. Her name's Sarah, I think you'll like her. Mom is going to hate her, but that's fine with me. Hey, did Sean tell you about the affair tonight?"

"Doesn't matter, I'll see you at the wedding." Ash hung up and buried himself further in the pillow.

"I heard you on the phone," Anna's voice was soft. She laid down next to him, her hand stroked his back. "Sean's a grown man, he can take care of himself. He made the decision to marry Marsha, not you. There's nothing you can do but be supportive and catch him if things fall apart."

"He's suffered with her for five years, I don't see him leaving."

"Maybe that's because he's happy Ash. Different things make different people happy. Look at us for example. You're going to school to become a zoologist, you love to work with animals, you're a gay man in his early twenties who likes pizza, westerns and hanging out in bars where they play Celine Dion...and you wonder why everyone knew you were gay," Anna giggled. "Sean isn't you, he likes to work on cars, watch black and white horror movies and he reads classic lit and cheesy romance novels," Anna paused, "maybe he's gay. That would explain why he's marrying Marsha the control freak. She's just butch enough to make up what he lacks in masculinity."

"You know he reads cheesy romance novels because they have happy endings. He's always wanted a happy ending."

"And Phil is different too. Even you and I for all our similarities have differences and they can be vast."

"We are more alike than we are different."

"We have different goals, different dreams, those are big, Ash. I want to work with people, help humanity understand and survive itself. You want to play with elephants and orangutans. I don't want a family, don't want kids. You've always been keen on having them."

Asher rolled over and looked at her. His eyes were bloodshot and tears threatened to spill from them. She kissed his cheek again.

"We've always had different dreams, Ash. It doesn't make our friendship any weaker. I love you and you love me regardless. It's the same with your brothers. Just because what makes them happy doesn't make you happy, doesn't mean you don't love them any less and they don't love you any less."

"You are going to make a damn fine psychologist, Anna." She sat up, Ash laid his head in her lap. "What if it doesn't work for him Anna?"

"Sean's a big boy, Ash, you can't make the decision for him. He's also not a babbling idiot, if he knows he has some where to go, then if things get bad, he'll go. You have to make sure he has that place, regardless of whether you're in Boston, London or Singapore, you have to be able to provide him with a place to fall back. Offer him your unconditional love and he'll come to you if he needs it."

"I hate Marsha."

"That's fine, ask Sean how she is, but don't make it a topic of conversation. Talk about other things, you and Sean both have common interests. Use those as discussion blocks and not his wife. Be strong and supportive, like they will be of you."

"You said you didn't want a family. Does that mean you'll never get married?" Ash decided to change the subject.

"I don't know, maybe, but that's a long way off. I'm starting Johns' Hopkins next year, that will take most of my time. A new city, new school, new faces, I don't have time for serious relationships now, there's no way I'm going to find the time in Baltimore."

"You'll be closer, we can hang out more."

"Seven hours isn't that close. I guess if you take the train it's not bad. Yeah, we can hang out more. When we have long weekends and breaks." Anna stroked his hair.

"Yeah, long breaks. Anna, what do you think the chances are that everything will work out?"

"I don't know, no one does. The most you can do is love him unconditional and be there if he needs you. Get some sleep, Ash," Anna stood up from the bed.

"You too, see you in the morning." She turned out the light as she left the room. Asher stared at the ceiling until dawn.

Wedding Bells

The wedding had been a rousing success. At least it was in Sheila's opinion and hers was the only one that mattered. The reception was going almost as well. Sheila's only concern was that her boys were tossing back drinks too fast for her taste.

Her new daughter in law was circling the group, talking to everyone. Marsha was glowing, smiling and beautiful. Sheila thought Marsha was perfect and only hoped her other two boys would find girls like her. Actually, she hoped Phil would find one like Marsha. Asher was already entangled with a girl. The same girl he'd been involved with since childhood.

"Dan, maybe you should help Phil meet someone nice," Sheila said after a while.

"Sarah seems nice. And Phil doesn't have trouble meeting girls, he has trouble keeping girls. If he was smart, he'd either keep Sarah or ask Anna to marry him." Dan was also tossing back drinks too fast.

"Phil can't marry Anna, Asher's going to," Sheila took his glass.

"Sheila, we've been over this. Ash is not going to marry Anna. He told you himself that he was homosexual."

"Oh, that's just a phase. It's like broccoli. Do you remember that? He complained all through childhood how much he hated broccoli then one morning he woke up and liked it. Couldn't get enough of it actually. This is like that. He claims to dislike girls now, but he'll come out of it."

"It's not a phase, Sheila." Dan took the tumbler back. "And it definitely isn't like broccoli. You can't compare vegetables to sexual orientation. They aren't even remotely close."

"If it's not a phase, how can you be so calm?" Sheila squinted at him.

"I want whatever's best for Ash and if he doesn't like girls, then he doesn't like girls."

"That means no grandchildren."

"We have Phil and Sean for that, besides, Asher can adopt if he finds someone he loves and wants children." Dan drained his glass. "I need a refill." Sheila watched him walk away from her. She didn't understand his calmness. She pushed thoughts of Asher from her mind. It wasn't Asher's day, it was Sean and Marsha's.

Speaking of which, they still weren't together, Sheila noted. Sean was still sitting with his brothers and Marsha was still talking to guests. Sheila went to him.

"Sean, what are you doing? You are supposed to be walking around with your wife, thanking people for coming." Sheila scolded. Sean had to be told exactly what to do or he wouldn't do anything.

"Actually, mom, Marsha told me to stay here while she talked to everyone." Sean smiled, his eyes were narrower than normal.

"Sean, are you drunk?" His mother stuck out her bottom lip.

"Not yet," his smile widened.

"You had better not get drunk young man." Sheila sat down next to him. "I think all of you have had far too many drinks. Give me those glasses."

"Mom, chill out," Asher handed her an empty glass. "It's a wedding, you're supposed to drink at a wedding. Besides, this will be the last time we get to have a drink with our brother until only god knows when."

"Yeah, mom, it's a wedding, you're supposed to get drunk at a wedding." Phil grabbed Sean, pulling him to him and hugged him.

"My boys are not supposed to get drunk, period. Now I demand you stop this right this instant." Sheila took their glasses.

"Mom, you're ruining Sean's wedding," Asher motioned a waiter over.

"No, you are, by getting drunk. Now if you really loved your brother, you'd stop drinking."

"But he's drinking," Phil cocked his head and looked at her.

"Fine, if the three of you loved me, you'd stop trying to embarrass me." She stood from the table and stomped away with the glasses. Returning to her seat, she watched as none of her boys ordered another drink. Instead they took soda. That was better. Sheila smiled again. Dan returned to his seat.

"The boys are turning into such fine young men," she said absently.

"Yeah, yeah they are."

"You should set a better example though. You drink too much, so they drink too much. Sean doesn't look very happy, he needs to mingle with people other than his brothers."

"Sean looks happy enough."

"Go talk to him Dan."

"About what, Sheila?"

"Oh, whatever it is father's say to son's on their wedding day. He needs to smile or else Marsha will wonder if he really wanted to get married. Not the ideal way to start a wedding."

"Marsha's too busy to notice if Sean's smiling or not. I figure he'll be happy once this wedding stuff is done with. Tonight, he'll be smiling again. Then off they go to Rome or where ever it is they are honeymooning."

"No, you need to talk to him now, Dan. Otherwise he'll resent this day and resent the fact that he got married." Sheila sipped a glass of champagne. "Dan you have to talk to him."

"Fine, I'll go talk to the boy." Dan walked over to them. Sheila watched as he hugged Sean, then Phil, then Ash. He said a few things that she couldn't hear, but the boys started laughing. Dan walked back to her.

"There," Dan sat down. "Do you feel better?"

"Yes, but he went right back to sitting with his brothers."

"Where do you expect him to sit? With complete strangers? Most of the guests are Marsha's."

"He could sit with her family or us. Your sons have always had a negative effect on Sean. They are always convincing him to do something. Like the Mardi Gras where they all snuck into the city and got arrested for underage drinking."

"Sean has a mind of his own, he can make his own choices. He doesn't automatically do stuff just because his brothers tell him to."

"Dan, go talk to him again, tell him to move about the crowd."

"I'm not going to go talk to him again. He's a grown man, he can make choices. If he wants to sit with his brothers, then let him sit with his brothers."

"Dan, Sheila," Anna smiled at them.

"Arianna, how nice to see you. I haven't had time to speak more than two words since you arrived. How's college?" Sheila plastered her smile in place. The girl was thin as a rail.

"College is good." Anna took a seat across from her. "Keeps me busy though."

"There's a whole buffet table over there, Arianna, do you want me to fix you a plate?"

"No, I've already eaten, but thanks. If I get hungry I'll go grab something else. The wedding was beautiful."

"Yes it was," Sheila pursed her lips. "Are you sure you're not hungry, dear?"

"Yes I'm sure," Anna stood up. "I need to go talk to Ash, see you later."

"That girl needs to eat more, she's always so skinny."

"She's not that skinny, Sheila," Dan sounded tired.

"She is that skinny. Are you tired, Dan, it has been an exhausting day." Sheila pushed her champagne around. "If she marries our sons, we won't get grandchildren from them. I know Arianna's a good girl, but she doesn't have the hips to give birth. She's too skinny."

"Sheila, the girl isn't that skinny."

"Marsha has good hips for childbirth. Her and Sean will probably give us grandchildren by the end of next year. She's almost twice Arianna's size."

"Marsha isn't that much bigger than Anna."

"Oh yes she is, Dan." Sheila appraised her daughter in law again. Marsha was perfectly built for having kids in Sheila's opinion. Marsha wasn't tall and she was about a size 14 with wide hips, Sheila liked that.

"No she's not, Sheila. If Phil married Anna I'm sure they'd give us beautiful grandchildren."

"She's going to marry Asher, not Phil," Sheila corrected.

"Whatever."

"Phil had better hurry though and find someone to marry. He's not as young as he used to be. He's starting to lose his hair and get some weight around the middle."

"He's twenty-four, Sheila, he has plenty of time to marry."

"Maybe he should marry Anna," Sheila ignored her husband completely. "Ash is still young enough that he'll have no trouble getting a wife. Maybe I should tell Phil. Maybe I should talk to Anna."

"Don't you even think about," Dan shook his finger at her. "Let them do what they want. If Phil and Anna want to marry fine, but you are not going to try to hurry the process along."

"He's my son, I'll do as I like." Sheila stuck her nose in the air.

"Who's getting married?" Sean asked coming to the table.

"Phil and Arianna," Sheila smiled at him. She noticed the frown that spread across his face. "Now don't you pout, we aren't going to have the wedding today. Today is your wedding, you've got at least a year before their wedding."

"I didn't know they were dating," Sean shook his head and walked away.

"Maybe I shouldn't have told him during his wedding. I have to go find Arianna." Sheila stood up and searched for the girl in the crowd. "She'll gain some weight after she gets married."

"Sheila, sit down." Dan pulled at her dress.

"I will do no such thing, these are my sons and I will see each of them married." She stomped away. Dan just didn't understand, this was her duty as a mother. Finding good girls to marry to her sons. Arianna wasn't the prize daughter in law, but Phil had brought home worse girls.

"Arianna," Sheila hugged her. "I didn't get a chance to talk to you."

"Uh, sure," Anna said bye to the girl she was talking to and followed Sheila to a table. "What's up?"

"Well, Dan and I were talking and we wanted to know how serious your relationship with Asher is?"

"Oh, uh, Asher and I are friends and nothing more." Anna was frowning. Sheila couldn't understand why everyone was frowning. It was a wedding.

"Oh good dear, you see, you're already like a daughter to me. Phil isn't getting any younger, he needs a woman who can care for him and love him. You've been around enough that you know his faults and can over look them."

"Sheila, I, um," Anna looked at her.

"That's all right dear, I know we've had some differences in the past, but we've moved on. I would love to have you as a daughter in law. Now, I was expecting you to marry Ash, but he doesn't seem to want that anytime soon. He has to get out of this whole phase he's in. You aren't getting any younger though and can't wait around for Asher for the rest of your life. Phil would be the perfect substitution. He's like Asher in so many ways and you two know each other so well. I'm sure Heather and Tony would both agree that it would be a good match."

"Uh, isn't Phil dating someone?"

"Yes, but have you met her?" Sheila gave a short laugh. "She's not Phil's type. She'll never be able to handle him. I don't think either of them know it yet, but as his mother, I know these things."

"Um, have you mentioned this to Phil?"

"Not yet, dear, women are much more sensible in these areas. Phil would completely ignore my suggestion. It's up to you, Arianna. You'll have to convince Phil it's a good idea. Unfortunately, it always falls to us to convince the man that he loves us. Do you need any tips dear?"

"What?"

"Tips on how to get his attention. I know the kids today, Sean and Marsha were living together for three years before they got married. It would prove me stupid to believe nothing was going on. That's how men are these days. Now, you can't give in entirely until you're sure you are the only one he wants, but you have to give them something." Sheila was staring into her glass. Her boys were different than Dan had been. Morals had been different.

"Um, no, thanks Sheila, but I'm sure my mom can give me the tips I need." Anna scooted her glass across the table in front of her.

"Maybe, but no one knows a son like a mother. You come talk to me if he doesn't seem interested."

"Sure, Sheila."

Sheila stood up and looked over at Phil. He was smiling, Ash was smiling, only Sean wasn't smiling. She needed to apologize for bringing up Phil and Arianna during Sean's wedding.

"Sean, can I talk to you?" She place her hand on his shoulder.

"Sure," he stood up and walked with her.

"I didn't mean to bring up Phil and Arianna during your wedding. It was careless of me. I was just so excited about two weddings that I forgot myself. This is your special day, just for you and Marsha. I'm sorry to take that away from you. Once you get back from your honeymoon though, I'd like your help. I heard that Arianna is going to Baltimore in the summer. Phil is going back to Maine after the wedding. However, it's hard to have a long distance relationship. Could you talk Phil into moving to Baltimore? I mean, he's graduated, there's no need for him to stay in the cold frigid north."

"Yeah, no problem mom," Sean went back to the table. Sheila went back to Dan.

"Sheila, tell me you didn't." Dan didn't look at her.

"I did and I'm glad I did. Arianna seemed kind of frightened when I offered her tips about," she leaned in close to Dan and whispered, "sex." Sheila looked around, noting that no one had heard her, she straightened herself. "Means she's still a untouched. Won't it be nice to have your son marry someone pure and unspoiled? I mean for all of Marsha's good traits, she wasn't one."

"Oh jeez," Dan moaned.

"Now that is not the attitude to have, Dan. It's refreshing to meet a girl who still has morals. For all of Arianna's faults, she is at least moral. I was worried about it since she's been gone from home for so long, but it looks like Heather did a good job raising that girl."

"Sheila, stop talking, I'm getting a headache."

"Oh here, I have some Advil, I know how you often get headaches in the afternoon. I think it's the New Orleans heat. I've noticed you don't have them so much now that we live in Portland." Sheila found the Advil and handed two to Dan. "Maybe it's the humidity. It's so wet here it's hard to breath. I didn't notice that until we had moved, but it's really very heavy for air."

"Sheila, please stop talking." Sheila watched as Dan took the pills.

Once that was complete she turned her attention back to her sons. They were all still sitting together. Sean still frowning. She felt guilty for ruining his day and considered going to talk to him again. Arianna walked over and put her hands on Phil's shoulders though. That was more like it. That was what Sheila had been talking about. Now, she could watch as the perfect match was made for Phil. Her guilt was eased a bit. She may not have made the day very happy for Sean, but she had for Phil.

Arianna leaned in low and talked directly in Phil's ear. Sheila wished she could hear them, wished she was there to hear what Arianna was saying. She hoped Arianna didn't say something foolish that would chase Phil away. Maybe Sheila should have offered talking tips as well. Too late now though, she sighed.

Her attention was about to go back to Dan when Sean stood up. Her eyes snapped back on her sons. Sean looked angry. He grabbed another drink and guzzled it. Sheila stood up. Arianna looked scared for a moment, then backed away. Phil seemed puzzled and Ash was trying to talk to Sean. Sheila was needed. She walked briskly over to them.

"...don't give me that," Sean sneered then decked Phil. It caught Phil by surprise, he tumbled backwards in his chair. Arianna's fear seemed replaced by anger. Sheila liked that, the girl was going to stand up for Phil, even though Phil was probably in the wrong. She had been right to suggest it to the girl.

"Sean what is your problem?" Anna yelled. She knelt next to Phil.

"Yes, Sean what is your problem?" Sheila demanded getting close to him. "Now I apologized for blurting out like that, but this is ridiculous."

Dan was suddenly at her side as well. "Sean, let's go for a walk," he took him by the shoulder.

Marsha ran over, surveyed the scene and was instantly angry. Sheila sighed, it would be left to her to deal with Marsha. She took Marsha's hand and gently pulled her away from Phil and the others.

"I'm sorry Marsha, this is probably my fault. Sean had too much to drink I'm afraid and then I went and told him that Arianna and Phil were getting married. This day was supposed to be about the two of you and I had to spoil it by announcing another wedding. I don't know what I was thinking."

"I can't imagine Sean getting that mad over something like that," Marsha's eyes were narrowed, her mouth set in a hard line.

"Well, Sean is the middle child. He always felt he needed to contend with his brothers for attention and now the day he gets married. I make him continue his pursuit for attention by announcing Phil's marriage. It was terrible and thoughtless, I am so sorry."

"That's ok, Sheila. I think Sean was nervous and then the added announcement probably sent him over the edge. It'll be fine by the time we get back from our honeymoon. We should go congratulate Phil and Anna."

Both women headed over to the table again. Phil was sitting in his chair at the table. Anna holding a bag of ice on his face. Asher was frowning. The other guests seemed to be less interested now that the fight was over.

"Congratulations, Phil, Anna, getting married is such a big decision. I don't think anyone even knew you were dating." Marsha shook Anna's hand.

"See, one big happy family now," Sheila smiled. This day was shaping up just fine after all.

The First

"Deep breathes, in through your nose and out through your mouth." Phil helped Tonya to the car. Snow and ice covered the ground. Phil prayed they didn't slip. Of all the places in the world he had to choose Maine.

"You breath," Tonya shot him a very dangerous look. The look told him to shut up or else. Phil took the warning. He was sure his blood pressure was skyrocketing, adrenaline surged through his body making him light headed and panicky.

"Ok," Phil took a deep breath in through his nose as he opened the car door. He exhaled as Tonya climbed in. Stupid snow, Phil mentally cursed. He slipped, but kept his balance as he went to the driver's side.

"Maybe we should call an ambulance." Tonya suggested as Phil pulled the car out of the garage.

"I can get you there, you just tell him to wait."

"Her," Tonya corrected. This was the running argument between them. Phil thought it was a boy, Tonya a girl. They had opted not to find out ahead of time. Now the baby had decided to surprise them almost a month early. "And don't kill us trying to get there."

"Uh-huh," Phil concentrated his efforts on the road. Luckily it wasn't dark yet. There was still semi-blue sky above them. That would help. After dark the roads would freeze and become a sheet of ice. He'd never get the car moving then.

"Now would be a good time to think of names," Tonya held the handle over the door. "I think it's time."

"Daniel." Phil's knuckles were turning white from gripping the steering wheel.

"Except it's a girl."

"Danielle then," Phil didn't take his eyes off the road. "Honey, I know you are trying to occupy yourself, but I really can't discuss this right now. If I do, you may end up giving birth on the side of the road with the car wrapped around a pole."

"Fine," he wondered what she was doing. He could hear her trying to breath, concentrate on breathing. Lamaze classes were coming back in bits and pieces. How close together were the contractions? "Oh shit," Tonya muttered next to him.

"What?" Phil peeked at her for a moment then immediately focused on the road again.

"I think my water just broke," Tonya already sounded tired.

"Are you sure?" Phil was going to have to replace the car. He was trying to be one of those supportive husbands and fathers who helped his wife with the delivery. But he had a very weak stomach.

"Yes," Tonya snapped. "Sorry, just get us there. In one piece."

Phil tuned her out. Once he got her settled into a room he had a million people to call. It was happening fast, faster than he had expected. The contractions had started an hour earlier. Tonya had dismissed them as false labor pains. Boy had she been wrong. They could have been at the hospital if they had known. But the baby was still not due for another month. Phil tried not to think about it. It was hard with Tonya making noises next to him. He needed to drive. All his concentration needed to be on the road.

The bright lights of the hospital came into view. They were still far from there, maybe a mile, but in the little town, the hospital was the biggest building. The car lost traction for a second or two and Phil wrangled it back into his control. Next to him, Tonya sucked in a breath so loud it startled him.

"You stay here, I'll get a wheelchair and an attendant." Phil parked the car at the front door. He was out in the parking lot before it had stopped rolling. "My wife is in labor." He announced once inside. Three or four people looked at him funny. The receptionist stood up.

"How long has she been having contractions?"

"A little over an hour and her water broke about six minutes ago." Phil felt himself start to get dizzy. He leaned against the wall. "She's in the car."

A nurse, an attendant and the receptionist went outside. Phil followed on legs that felt rubbery. He would have to move the car once they got Tonya inside. The salt pelts felt huge under his feet as he went to the car. They were already moving Tonya into the wheelchair. He managed a weak smile.

Once the car was safely parked in a spot Phil headed back inside. Tonya wasn't in the waiting room. He went to the desk.

"She's being prepped. You can go back. A nurse will show you the room."

"Sure," Phil listened to the buzzer. The door opened automatically. He stepped through. The emergency room was bustling. Nurses and attendants walked quickly from one place to another. A few doctors flipped through charts. "Um, my wife was just brought in, she's in labor," he said to a nurse.

"That would explain the pale color," a nurse smiled at him. "Is this your first?"

"Yes," Phil stared at her blankly.

"What's her name?"

"Tonya Davidson. She was just brought in like two minutes ago."

"Oh yes, she's in exam room three. It's right through there." She pointed to a hallway. Phil thanked her and went in search of room three.

It was actually easy to find, considering Phil felt like he was made of jell-o. He hoped he didn't faint. He'd heard stories about other men fainting. They always ended up on the floor with some nurse looking at them pathetically.

"Hi?" Phil was cautious entering the room.

"You must be Mr. Davidson." A doctor smiled at him. "I was just about to examine your wife to see how far along she is in the process."

Phil immediately went to the head of the bed. He stroked Tonya's hair and stared at her face. He didn't want to see what the part under the sheet looked like.

"Phil, you don't have to do this," Tonya said soothingly. "I won't hold it against you."

"No, no I need to do this. If you can go through it, than I can too." He wished he really felt that way.

"He'll be right as rain as soon as it really gets started," the doctor spoke from under the sheet. Phil thought that was a little creepy. "All expectant fathers have a bit of nervousness and jitters before their wives are in the delivery room."

"We'll see," Tonya smiled at him. Phil wanted to ask the doctor to stop talking. The chair was on the other side of the room. To get it, Phil was going to have to see what the doctor was doing. Not something he wanted, but he felt the need to sit down.

"Um, yes, well this is going to be pretty fast." The doctor came out from under the sheet. "We're going to move you immediately into a delivery room. You've dilated almost seven centimeters and your water broke already."

The doctor left the room, Tonya repositioned herself some. Phil grabbed the chair, dragging it to his wife's side. She was smiling.

"If you get any paler, I'm going to be able to see through you."

"At least you still have a sense of humor." Phil felt terrible both emotionally and physically.

"Go call your family. Go call my family. Go call somebody, honey. You really don't have to be here for it. You can come in when it's done."

"That makes me feel worse, not better." Phil took her hand. "I'm the father, I should be there."

"It won't make much of a difference, I figure you'll end up on the floor by the time it's done."

"Thanks for the encouragement, babe." He stroked her hand with his thumb. "I think I can do it."

"All right, I promise not to tell anyone if you faint." She gave a short laugh that was clipped by an intake of breath. "These are getting stronger."

"Do you want..." Phil was interrupted by a nurse.

"Mrs. Davidson, let's get you moved," the nurse smiled. Everyone but Phil felt like smiling. Phil felt like crawling under the chair and refusing to come out until spring.

Tonya got up off the table holding her abdomen. It reminded Phil of the time Asher had appendicitis. Ash had held his stomach the same way. However, Tonya was moving better than Ash. She sat down in the wheelchair.

"Mr. Davidson, if you'll follow us, I'll show you were you can change so you can go into the room."

Phil tried to stand up, but his legs wouldn't move. He had to force himself out of the chair using the bed. His entire body felt like it was in revolt, nothing wanted to work. I can do this, Phil thought, mentally coaching himself. He felt like such a jerk for having this much trouble. Tonya was the one in pain.

They walked for miles, a labyrinth of hallways and doors. At least it seemed that way to Phil. Every step required effort. Tonya kept smiling at him, encouraging him, but he knew she was wondering why he was determined to be there.

The "C" Word

"This is Sean."

"Sean, it's Anna. I'm in New Orleans. My mom's in the hospital." Anna was silent.

"What's wrong with her?" Sean sounded concerned.

"She has a tumor," Anna's voice sounded strained.

"I'm on my way." Sean hung up the phone. He drove at breakneck speed trying to get to her. He tried to remember how long it had been since he'd talked with her. Three years? Maybe four? He'd stopped calling her because it always brought a fight with Marsha.

"Anna?" He sat down next to her in the waiting room.

"Sean, thank you for coming," she began to cry.

Sean folded his arms around her. She smelled good, felt good in his arms. His heart was breaking for her, he felt the tears well up and fought them. He needed to be strong and crying was definitely not strong.

"Do you want me to call anyone?" He asked, gently pushing her back to look at her. Her lashes were wet with tears, her eyes sparkled.

"Ash," her voice was barely above a whisper.

"Do you want anything?"

"No," she looked down at her hands. "Thank you for coming Sean. I should have called you more, but..." she hiccupped.

"Don't worry about it, I could have called too." He stood up and went to the phone in the waiting room.

"Hello?" Ash sounded worried.

"Ash," Sean thought of how to phrase it.

"Sean I can't talk, I can't find Anna. She was supposed to meet me today but she didn't show up..."

"Ash, Anna's with me," Sean interrupted. "She's in New Orleans."

"What?" Ash got very quiet.

"Heather is having emergency surgery for the removal of a brain tumor. Anna needs you here." Sean felt his heart break even more. He didn't want Ash to take his place at her side, but couldn't stop it either.

"Tell her I'll call Ryan and catch the first flight to see her."

"Ok, Ash, get here as soon as you can." Sean hung up. The doctor was talking to Anna. He wanted to hear, but something held his feet in place. He couldn't move until the doctor left.

"Sean, what if she dies?" Anna asked as Sean sat down next to her.

"Hey, hey, she's not going to die. She's in a great hospital with good doctors. I'm sure she's going to be fine. And knowing Heather, she'll be wanting out of here within a few days. She'll be complaining about the food and you being away from your job and everything else Heather does. Asher is going to catch the next flight. He'll be here before tomorrow. Where are you staying?"

"I don't know." Anna moved off his shoulder, closing her eyes, she tilted her head back, laying it along the back of the chair. "I hadn't thought that far ahead."

"Do you want me to get you room?"

"That's ok, I'll do it later."

"I am capable of getting you a room Anna."

"I know, but I'd rather you be here than running around the city, getting me a room." Anna sighed, "Ash will get reservations some place. I'll just stay with him."

"Ash said he'd call Ryan and see if he wanted to come."

Anna sat up, "can you call Ash and tell him not to? I don't want to put with Ryan."

"I can..." Sean was interrupted by his cell phone ringing. "Damn it," he dug it out of his pocket. "Hello?"

"Sean, where are you? I called work and they told me you had left. Said it was some kind of emergency." Marsha's voice sounded as sharp as glass over the phone.

"I'm at the hospital with Anna. Her mother has a brain tumor, they are doing emergency surgery to remove it." He looked at Anna. Her lids closed, face serene. Sean could only imagine the pain and fear she was feeling. He put his hand on hers.

"It's not your mother, why are you there? Where's Asher? Isn't it his job to baby-sit Anna?"

"Ash is coming in from Boston but he won't be here in time for the surgery. He probably won't get here until after she's done. Anna can't sit alone during the surgery."

"She has other friends, let them sit with her. You should be at work and then at home. It's not your job to sit with her. She's just some girl you used to know."

"I'm staying here, Marsha. I'm not going to leave her."

Anna tapped his arm. "You should go," she whispered, "I don't want to cause trouble with you and Marsha."

"I'm not leaving." Sean was amazed at how forceful that sounded.

"Sean if you don't come home right now, don't bother to come home tonight." Marsha had issued the ultimatum. It usually set Sean running for home. Not today.

"Then I'll find a hotel room," Sean's voice sounded calm, but his body was a jumble of nerves.

"Fine, I'll come there too." Marsha's voice was angry.

"The last thing Anna needs is to put up with your bullshit. Don't you dare show up here."

Anna tapped him again. Her eyes were wide, her mouth slightly open. She was shaking her head emphatically.

"Sean Davidson, you had better decide what's important to you right now."

"This is, I will sit with Anna at least until Asher arrives. If you don't want me to come home after that, fine, I won't. But I'm not going to leave her and you are not the person she needs to deal with. We'll talk about this later." Sean hung up the phone.

Anna looked like someone had just committed murder in front of her. Her eyes were impressively wide and her face pale. Her body had the slightest tremor to it.

"I can't believe you just did that," Anna said after a few seconds.

"You're more important," Sean pulled her to him. "Do you still want me to call Asher back?"

"No, if Ryan shows up I guess I'll deal with it." Anna's voice sounded sad and distant.

"Who's Ryan?" Sean was looking for a conversation topic to take her mind off of it.

"Ryan is the guy that I'm sort of dating."

"Sort of dating?"

"He started out as a roommate of Asher's, but now he spends most of his time at my house."

"Why don't you want him here?"

"Because I don't love him," Anna sighed again. "I want to be surrounded by loved ones, not just guys I sort of date."

"What can I do for you, Anna?" Sean felt impotent, helpless. He wanted to make all her fears disappear, solve all her problems.

"Sit with me," Anna put her head on his shoulder.

Sean did as she asked, he sat with her. Holding her when she needed it, giving her space when she asked. He waited, sitting next to her, waiting for Ash, waiting for the end of surgery, waiting for things to right themselves. Sean wanted to escape, wanted to escape with her. His mind reeled at the possibility of it. He had never been to Boston, he'd promised Ash several times to come out and hadn't done it.

"I think I need some air." Anna stood up.

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Please?"

Together they walked outside. Anna didn't speak much, just stood and looked at the parking lot. Behind the parking lot you could see the skyscrapers of downtown New Orleans. The city at night was beautiful. In the cool afternoon air, the beauty and mystery of New Orleans was buried under concrete and reinforced glass. He wanted to know what she was looking at, his heart needed to know her thoughts.

"What are you thinking so hard about?" Sean finally asked.

"The last time I was in New Orleans. Do you know when that was?" Anna continued to stare into the heart of the city.

"I know it's been a while."

"Since your wedding. Mom has come to Baltimore and Boston for Christmas since Tony was stationed overseas. I miss the city, miss the promise that New Orleans holds. In Boston, when I tell people I'm from New Orleans do you know what they ask me?"

"I can only imagine." Sean moved closer to her.

"They ask if it really is the city that never stops partying. They wonder if the French Quarter is really as magical and mystical as the movies make it. They ask if I've ever seen a ghost or if I believe in voodoo."

"What do you tell them?"

"Occasionally someone will ask if I know where so and so lives or if I've ever been to a cemetery after dark. They want to know if I've met Emeril or if all Cajun food is hot. If crayfish are really just small lobsters. They wonder if Mardi Gras really is a street party until dawn. I think I disappoint them with my answers."

"Why?"

"Because the answer is always no. Ash and I laugh about it in Boston. Here though, the questions make me sad. For all its history and meaning, very few people have a clue about anything in this city. I feel the pull of the city, yet I never come back. It's like I'm avoiding it."

"I'm sure you're not really avoiding it." Sean put his hand on her shoulder.

"Yes, I am. Just like I've been avoiding you. When I think of New Orleans I think of you. So I avoid it. Do you remember immediately before your wedding?"

"You'll have to be more specific."

"At your bachelor's party. You, Ash, Phil and I sat around after everyone else had gotten smashed and we laughed about old times. Each of us promised to love this city for forever. We all swore to call it home again. None of us have come back. We rarely even visit unless there's some kind of tragedy." Anna turned to him. "We should go back in."

"No, let's stay a little longer. It's a good view and you need to remember this when you return to Boston. Of course, there aren't as many tropical storms or hurricanes in Boston. And I imagine the flooding isn't nearly as bad either." Sean was glad to get a small smile from her. "When Heather's better, I intend to remind you of all that New Orleans has to offer. If you want, we can even try to meet Emeril." Sean hugged her to him.

"I don't think I would be impressed with Emeril. I'm sure his food is great, but he can't beat my mom's cooking."

"I don't think anyone can beat your mom's cooking." He let her go. "Now we can go back in."

They walked slowly through the hospital. Sean held her hand, enjoying the feel of it. Anna didn't look at him.

"You don't have to feel guilty for avoiding me, Anna." He said as they entered the waiting room. "I would probably avoid me too if I was in your situation." They sat down.

"Miss Rivers?" The doctor finally returned.

"Yes," Anna stood, taking Sean with her.

"It appears we got all of it. We won't know for sure until after some more tests. She won't be ready for visitors until tomorrow, though."

"Can I see her at all? Just for a moment?" Anna pulled from him. Sean watched the doctor, knew the doctor was wrestling for an answer.

"For a moment," he finally sighed and led Anna away.

Sean returned to sitting in the waiting room. It looked like Heather was going to be ok. He was relieved and resentful. Then he was angry at himself for being bitter. Getting up, he went back to the wall of payphones. He dialed Phil's number.

"Hello?" Phil answered on the fifth ring, just before the answering machine.

"Hi, has Ash called you?" Sean put his head against the wall.

"Yeah, I spoke to Ash. How's Heather?"

"She just came out of surgery. They think they got it all, but they need to run some more tests before they know for sure."

"How's Anna?"

"Anna's doing as well as can be expected."

"How are you doing?"

"Tired, I'm pretty sure Marsha kicked me out of the house."

"Do you need a place to stay?" Phil talked softly.

"No, I'm going to stay with Ash tonight and then tomorrow I'll go back to the house. If I give Marsha some time to think, she'll let me back in."

"Is that what you want to do?"

"No, but that's what I'm going to do," Sean closed his eyes.

"If it's not what you want why go back?"

"Because I have to."

"You're always welcome here. Ash feels the same way."

"I know, but I have to do what I have to do," the tiredness was overwhelming.

"Ok, Sean. Tell Anna that we're thinking of her. We'd be there with her, except the little one has chicken pox." Phil sounded regretful enough that Sean felt a twinge of guilt. He was here, it should have been someone else. Phil or Ash both would be better people in this situation.

"Will do, Phil. Tell Tonya I said hi."

"Of course," Phil was quiet for a moment. "Remember Sean, our offer stands."

"I know. I need to go, Anna will be back soon." Sean hung up before he could say what he was thinking. If Anna asked him to come to Boston with her, he'd gladly leave. He wouldn't even pack, he'd just go. If she asked him to go to Siberia, Sean would get on the plane with her. He sat back down. Anna returned a few moments later, her face still looked worried, but it had lessened some.

"Now I need to find a hotel," she sighed taking Sean's hand.

"And you probably need to eat."

"Will you join me for dinner? I figure I've put you on the outs with your wife, buying you dinner is the least I can do."

"I'll go to dinner with you, but I'm buying. Phil wants me to tell you that he's thinking of you. They all are. How long do you think it will take to tell Tony?"

"I don't know, I'm not even sure where he's stationed exactly. I think it was Germany or something, but I haven't had time to talk to him lately. Mom knows."

"I'm sure you've had your reasons. And Anna, don't worry about my wife, if I had to make the decision again, I wouldn't change it."

Anna gave a small laugh, "thank you, Sean. You didn't have to come, thank you for doing it."

"Yes I did, Anna," he took her hand and kissed the back of it. "You've always been like family to me. If the tables were turned, you'd run to be with any of us. We should do the same for you."

"Yeah right, I can't even tell you where my own brother is stationed." She sighed again. The sound filled Sean with despair. "I've let so many things slip away. First it was college and now it's my patient schedule, it's always something. I need to get back in touch with the things that matter, Sean. I've neglected everyone that wasn't in my immediate vicinity." Anna began to cry again. Sean pulled her into his arms. He held her tight, letting her sob against him.

"Today's the perfect day to start, I think." Sean led her out of the hospital.

Marsha was standing next to his car. Anna stopped moving, her face told that she had seen her. Sean saw her too and wished they had stayed in the hospital.

"Anna, I'm sorry to hear about your mother. I hope she's going to be better soon." Marsha's voice didn't hold a bit of sympathy. Sean wanted to slap her.

"Thanks, I'm sure she will be. Sean, thanks again for coming," Anna dug out her phone. "I'll talk to you later."

"Uh, Anna," Sean stared at his wife. She was pissed. Sean expected poison to start dripping from her lips.

"Sean, I really need to speak to you." Marsha hissed at him. It completed the mental picture for Sean.

"Hold on," he walked towards Anna. He wanted to ask her to run away with him. They could go anywhere they wanted. Sean would take her anywhere if she would just go with him. Instead he asked, "will you be all right if I leave you?" He hated his own cowardice.

"Oh, I don't know why I'm hiding it." Marsha walked up joining them. "Anna's practically family." She had a smile plastered to her face that made Sean ill. "Sean, I'm pregnant."

Sean's entirely world tilted sideways, fell and shattered against the concrete. His timing was a disaster and so was Marsha's. Of course she would wait until he was ready to leave to get pregnant.

"Congratulations," Anna smiled weakly. "That's wonderful. Uh, yes I was holding to speak to General Woods." She spoke into the dead phone and walked away from them. The dream was gone, along with the promise of happiness.

"Sean are you going to say anything?" His wife snapped at him.

"Are you sure?" He still couldn't believe it. Where was Asher or Phil when you needed them. Now he couldn't leave, probably it was for the best.

Beale Street Blues

The car ride was going to be a long one. Sean knew this even before he slid into the driver's seat. His wife, Marsha, climbed into the passenger's seat with a stack of black leather books. They contained most of her CD collection, a collection which consisted mostly of British bands. She had the entire collections of the Beatles, Rolling Stones, David Bowie and others. Not that Sean had anything against these bands, but you could only listen to them so long before you wanted to scream. His British taste ran more towards Monty Python. He owned all their albums. Of course, Marsha had insisted he leave those at home. She thought them tacky and tasteless.

Jumping on the interstate was easy, it was traffic that sucked. Leaving New Orleans on a Tuesday morning was like trying to squeeze an elephant into a horse trailer. Traffic was bumper to bumper. The kind where you move about 100 feet before having to slam on your brakes because the car in front of you stopped short.

They managed to get through a Bowie CD before finally getting out of the city. Here the traffic thinned out. Sean didn't have to concentrate all his efforts on making sure they didn't wreck. He relaxed a little.

"Are you looking forward to seeing Memphis?" Marsha asked.

"Yeah, a little." Sean had never traveled before meeting Marsha. He had never even left New Orleans until their honeymoon.

"Good. Now I was thinking we could go see the zoo and tour the University's museum. After that, Memphis has some really great shopping. It would help if you liked the city."

"You haven't even been offered the job."

"I know, but I'm sure I will be. If you don't like Memphis, it will be harder for us to move there."

"I'm sure I'll like Memphis." Sean ejected the Duran Duran CD and replaced it with U2.

"I don't want to raise children in New Orleans. It's nice to visit, but to raise children..."

"I know."

"There's too much superstition and talk of witchcraft." Marsha stared out the window. "And drinking and partying. The entire city is one big drunken party after another."

"Yes, Marsha."

"Besides, our apartment isn't big enough for children. We should have moved into my apartment when we got married. It was in a better neighborhood and had more room."

"Mine was closer to both our jobs."

"Yes, but mine would have been better. I probably wouldn't be so desperate to move."

Sean turned up the radio and sang along. "...you're kept awake, dreaming someone else's dreams, coffee is cold but it will get you through, compromise that's nothing new to you..." Marsha reached over and turned the radio down.

"I don't know how you can listen to that. He has no rhythm and he only sings about unhappiness."

Sean ejected the U2 CD and put in something else. He knew Marsha would let him go back to U2 in a few minutes. Rammstein began blaring from the stereo.

"Oh Sean, not this again. You don't even know the words. You don't speak German. How can you like something if you don't know the words?"

"I like the music, it has a good melody."

"It has no melody. It's just a bunch of noise. It's all over the place. You can't follow it."

"I like the beat."

"Yeah, it's like being hit over the head by a hammer."

"If you listen to it, it's not."

"I'm not listening to it." Marsha ejected the CD and put on the Police. "What are you going to do while I'm at the interview?"

"Well, the hotel is downtown; I thought I might walk to Beale Street and then maybe to Graceland."

"Don't, you won't like it. Beale Street is a tourist trap. They have a Hard Rock Café for crying out loud. Graceland's just as bad."

"Probably."

"Besides, you don't like Blues or Elvis. Now, about two blocks from the hotel is a used bookshop. It specializes in the old books. You should go there."

"Ok."

"Try not to buy too much though. They are a bit pricey for books. Even if they are old. I got us tickets to see Rent at the Orpheum."

"I do like Blues." Sean said.

"You don't own any."

"I know, but I still like it."

"Anyway, I got tickets to see Rent at the Orpheum. It's for tomorrow night. I would prefer you not dress too casual for it. The Orpheum seems to cater to the upper class. It is very decorative."

"We've seen Rent like six or seven times."

"I know, but I just loved it. Besides, it's the Orpheum. I couldn't pass up a show there. It is considered one of the premier theatres in the country."

"All right. I didn't really pack any dress clothes."

"Oh Sean, I told you to pack some slacks and a nice shirt."

"I forgot."

"You're always forgetting something. I guess I know what you can do while I'm at the interview."

"I will go get some dress clothes."

"Good. Get a nice suit. Don't let some pushy salesgirl talk you into buying something that doesn't look good on you."

"It's just a pair of slacks and a dress shirt."

"If you're going to make the effort to go shopping, you should get an entire suit."

"I have suits."

"But you could always use another."

"All right, I'll buy an entire suit."

"And make it tasteful, Sean. If you finish suit shopping early, then you can step into the bookshop I was telling you about."

"All right."

"But don't buy anything too expensive. However, you must buy something, so try to keep it under $30."

"Why do I have to buy something?"

"You can't go into a store, poke around all its stuff and then just leave."

"Why?"

"Because it's not polite."

"What if they don't have anything under $30?"

"They will."

"What if I don't like it?"

"Sean, it's a book store, I'm sure you'll find something you like under $30. I mean, you can spend more than that at the bookstores in New Orleans if I'm not there to watch you. You're being rather difficult."

"Sorry."

"Now, when we get there, I say we check into our room and then grab dinner. There's a beautiful restaurant within walking distance of the hotel. They serve excellent seafood."

"Tennessee is land-locked. Where do they get seafood?"

Marsha frowned at him. "Not funny, Sean."

"Sorry."

"As I was saying. We'll have dinner then return to the hotel. My interview is tomorrow at 1:00 p.m. and should last just over an hour." She looked at him. "On second thought, I'll take you suit shopping in the morning. You have such bad taste in clothes. When I get this job, I expect you to get rid of some of the older suits and get new ones."

"All right."

"I'm serious Sean."

"You don't have the job yet."

"You are always so negative. I'm going to get the job. When we move, I figure you can take a couple of months to get the house situated before starting work."

"What if I have trouble finding a job?"

"You're a mechanic; you won't have trouble finding a job. If you do, I'll let you open up that garage you've always wanted. We'll have the money for it then."

"We have the money for it now."

"Not in New Orleans we don't. I need you to have a stable income and tinkering with cars will not do that. Especially since you seem to lack good business sense."

"Ok."

"Won't that be nice? You'll have your own little garage to work in. Be your own boss."

"Yes."

"I thought you'd like that." Marsha looked out the window. "Why are you stopping Sean?"

"There's a bookstore there. I'd like to get an audio book." He pulled in.

"Fine, I guess I'll drive." She moved into the driver's seat as Sean ran into the building.

He returned to the car after a few minutes, carrying a bag. He climbed into the passenger's seat. "I got Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen."

"I've read the book."

"So have I, but I like the story in it."

"Did you bring you're Discman? Put it in there." Marsha backed out of the parking lot. Sean dug in a bag in the back and pulled out the Discman. He inserted Pride and Prejudice, put on the headphones and settled back into the seat.

The next time Sean looked up he was surprised to see the drive was almost over. He was shocked that the eight hours had gone by so quickly. Marsha exited the highway and they entered the city.

"There's the Orpheum." Marsha said pointing out her window. They passed the theatre slowly. The next light was the intersection of Beale and Main Streets. Sean looked out his window, wondering what was down there.

"Sean, it's a complete waste of time." Marsha said, following his line of sight. "It's the French Quarter by a different name in a different city."

"I know." The light turned green, they proceeded to Union Ave and their hotel.

They ate dinner at the hotel restaurant, too tired to go out for a real dinner. The rest of the night was spent with Marsha planning their stay.

In the morning, they shopped and Sean got a new suit. Not the suit he wanted, but the one Marsha liked the best. At noon, Marsha left for her interview. Sean headed for the bookshop.

The shop was located on the corner of Main St. and Gayoso Ave. He knew Marsha had limited his spending, so he only bought the book he really wanted. A collection of Poe stories and poems. Sean thanked the cashier and wandered out of the store. His nose already buried in the pages.

He looked up and found he was walking in the wrong direction. He'd gone south instead of north. A blues rift drifted from a shop. The shop had posters of famous blues musicians. A black man with long dreads and bad teeth sat just outside on a white plastic lawn chair. He held a guitar in his lap and a saxophone sat next to him on the ground. Sean stared at him for several seconds.

"Gonna go in or just stare at the store front?" The man laughed.

Sean looked from the man to the store. He took a step forward. The man chuckled again and picked a few notes on his guitar. The music was hauntingly familiar. Slowly, Sean turned away from Beale Street and returned to the hotel.

He was lying on the bed, reading Poe when his wife came back. She had to call his name three times before he noticed she was there.

New Orleans Allure

Sean stared at the engine parts in front of him. The trip to Memphis had gone as well as he had expected. Now, Marsha was waiting for the call. The call that she swore would change their lives forever.

It was a call Sean dreaded. Leaving New Orleans meant more than just leaving the city he had grown up in. It was the cafes and shops that held his memories. The places he had hung out while growing up. They seemed the only things he had now. His brothers were scattered across the country side. They had wanted nothing more than to get the hell away from the city. Not Sean.

The New Orleans spring smelled slightly of swamp gas and sea water. The wind tickled his hair as it blew around him. He was playing hooky from work. His boss didn't care. He rarely took a day off. When he had gone in looking like someone had propped him up with a stick, his boss had sent him to relax.

Now he was wondering the French Quarter. He wasn't particularly fond of the area, but it was the last place Marsha would look for him. He wandered down the cramped streets. The day was young and the tourist shops in the Quarter were just starting to open their doors. He noticed the sign of one of the shops he passed. "Psychic and Tarot Reader: Come in and find out what your future holds" the sign proclaimed. It made him smile.

The smile felt foreign to his face. He couldn't remember the last time that had happened. It certainly didn't when Marsha was around. Sean stopped and stared into the windows. It looked like a psychic's shop should. Filled with old dusty things. A little old woman looked up and caught him staring. She beckoned him inside.

He stood indecisive. If he went in, he'd blow the money Marsha gave him every week. His allowance as she called it. Money for him to spend on whatever. She didn't think he was good with money. He needed to be told how much he could and couldn't spend. His paycheck was direct deposited every two weeks. The check stub told him how much he cleared. He saw only a small fraction of that money, the rest Marsha put into savings or some such.

"You look troubled, boy." The woman stood had come to the door. Her voice startled him. He'd been lost in thought and not noticed her moving.

"We all have problems," Sean smiled to her. She was exactly what he expected a psychic to look like. Dry, stringy white hair floated down over her shoulders. Facial lines told of hard times and too much experience.

"Come inside, have a cup of coffee." The woman said.

"I really can't afford your services," Sean politely responded.

"I offered coffee, not a reading." Her face softened. "You look like you don't have a single friend in the world. But could use one."

"Thanks," Sean stepped away. Why was he living? He didn't know. Marsha's voice droned in his head. "It's a ploy to get you to give her your money, Sean. She'll manipulate you." He hated that voice.

"Maybe one cup," Sean took a step back towards the door. The woman let him into the building.

"My name is Sean," he held out his hand to her.

"Well, Sean, I'm Greta and I'm glad you came in for a cup of coffee."

The name surprised him. He had expected something Southern with a little flare. Greta was anything but mysterious and Southern.

"Me too." He responded, feeling a weight on his chest. If Marsha found out, she would have a fit.

"Sit right down and I'll get that coffee. How do you take it?"

"A spoonful of sugar," he looked around her shop. Vials of stuff stood on one side. He went to inspect. From somewhere in back he heard Greta begin to sing "A spoonful of sugar" from Mary Poppins. He made him smile wider and the weight eased some.

Sean was turning a bottle entitled "Die Geliebteaugen" over in his hands when she returned. He sat the bottle on the shelf, embarrassed to be caught rummaging through her stuff. He felt like an interloper.

She smiled pleasantly, sitting his coffee on the table. Then she moved over next to him. She too examined the bottle he had just sat down.

"I doubt you need that," she put her hand on his arm. "I think you already have a woman that looks at you with the eyes of a lover."

Sean automatically looked at his wedding ring. He doubted very seriously that Marsha looked at him with any kind of affection, let alone with love and desire. He sat down at the table, still looking at his ring.

"Not her," Greta shook her head. "Another woman, someone that you love as well."

"I don't know..." Sean didn't finish. Was this woman really a psychic? Could she see that he loved another woman in another state? He didn't know.

"So tell me about yourself?"

Sean spent three hours talking with Greta. He rarely mentioned his wife and then only when necessary. He talked about his brothers, his work and his life in New Orleans. The coffee cups were refilled several times. Then Greta began talking about herself. Sean listened with complete rapture as he learned of her past and her Swiss heritage.

"Well, Sean, you told me everything but the young woman's name." Greta smiled at him. "But that's ok. We'll save that for another time. You go about your day of rest and I'll get to work. There's a wonderful little café about a block from here where you can get lunch. Be sure to come back and see me again."

The door closed behind Sean. He walked down a block and found the little café. Déjà vu overwhelmed him. Music floated to his ears. Something old and haunting, vaguely familiar. He sat down at one of the tables set up outside. His eyes drifted over the shops. He had been here some many years ago. They had had breakfast everyday at this little café, staring out at these shops, watching the tourists bustle to and fro.

His mind grabbed onto the anchor that kept him in place. Marsha. The name was distasteful and filled him dread. She was invading that special place. He dug out his cell phone.

"Asher," the voice on the other end merrily responded.

"How's my little brother doing in Boston?" He felt happy. The weight was entirely gone.

"Sean!" Asher's voice was practically dripping with joy. Sean could imagine him dancing a small circle in his living room. "Dude, I was just thinking about you. I was gonna call you tonight."

"Funny how that happens sometimes," Sean's smile widened. "So, you're coming to the family reunion, right?"

"Of course, Anna and I have already booked our flight."

"Yeah? What flights are you on?"

"You want our flight numbers?" Asher asked.

"It doesn't have to be that specific, but I wouldn't mind knowing. I'll pick you guys up from the airport."

"Ok." Asher gave Sean the information. Sean scribbled it on the napkin, then shoved it in his pocket.

"Excellent. I will see you then." Sean hung up. He ordered more coffee and scones. People bustled in front of him. Mostly groups of two or three. Many were younger women, who giggled and pointed excitedly. Tourists. Sean never got tired of the tourists. They amused him in a way that he couldn't describe. They seemed busy, determined and lost. Searching for the elusive fun and mystery that the Quarter seemed to promise. He finished his scones and his coffee before moving on.

On the next corner he found an internet café. He ducked inside. His heart raced as he checked. There were empty seats on Asher's return flight to Boston. Could he do it? He didn't have a credit card. Probably for the best. Closing the site, he stood up and headed home.

"Sean?" He heard his wife screech as he walked into the apartment.

"Yeah, I'm home."

"Where have you been?!" She came out yelling at him. "I called work and your boss said you'd gone home because you weren't feeling well. I came home and you weren't here. I called your cell, you didn't answer. So I started calling hospitals. Where have you been? I needed you today. I got the call, I got the job in Memphis. We have a month to pack and we have your family reunion next week. I gave notice to your boss. I was going to take us to dinner to celebrate, but you ruined that."

"How?" Sean asked, looking at her. This was the woman he had chosen to marry ten years earlier. He couldn't remember why he had married her. Convenience maybe. She had been there and ready.

He remembered his wedding. The fight with Phil because he'd thought his big brother was going to marry the girl of his dreams. He had chipped Phil's tooth with that punch. Later, he'd drank himself in a stupor and had a hangover on the plane ride to the honeymoon destination. Marsha's choice of course. New York City. She had spent all her time dragging Sean in and out of stores. He had wanted to go to Italy. Still wanted to go to Italy.

"How?" She screeched again. "What do you mean how? My worries over you have given me a stomach ache. I couldn't eat now if my life depended on it. I'd just throw it all back up. Is that what you want? Me vomiting my dinner up?"

Sean considered it for a moment, it wasn't exactly an unpleasant thought. It would keep her busy. Too busy to nag him.

"No, guess not. I'll run and get Chinese from that place on the corner." He grabbed his keys from the table.

"Oh no you won't. Look at you. You look like hell. Your hair is standing up, your face is dirty and your clothes are disheveled. What have you been doing all day? Rolling around in the mud?"

"No, I took the day to sit and watch the tourists." Sean replied.

"You did what?"

"Sat and watched the tourists."

"That's where you were? Too busy watching tourists to call your wife and let her know you were alive? Watching tourists? This is why you can't open your own shop. You'd never be there, you'd always be out watching tourists or some other such nonsense. If it wasn't for me, you'd live in a cardboard box and watch tourists all day long. Sometimes..." Marsha had more to say, but Sean tuned her out. He stood there staring at her, wondering how his life had gone so wrong.

He knew the answer. He wasn't brave enough, wasn't daring enough. He didn't take chances, he didn't gamble on the future. He watched and waited to see how things would pan out. As Marsha continued to lecture him, he realized he had never really lived. His chances with Anna were long gone, but he could start over. He was still young and fairly good looking. He could live with Asher or with Phil. Tonya, Phil's wife, would make him feel welcome. He could spend time with their three children while he looked for a job in Maine. Or he could come back to New Orleans, live in the city he cherished.

No, not New Orleans. Like his brothers, he finally need to get the hell away. As far and fast as he could. Away from Marsha, away from the swamp gases and sea salt. Away from the memories of what might have been.

He had wasted so many years doing the safe thing. Doing what was expected of him. He was ready to take that chance. Ready to move on to something new. How?

Sean considered calling Phil. Phil would buy him a plane ticket. Sean could pay him back when he and Marsha split up their assets. Marsha. The thought of telling her he was leaving almost killed the idea. When? And how? Marsha terrified him. He knew what she'd do and it wouldn't be pretty.

He went to bed on that thought. His brain turning and spinning. Suddenly he realized why all those abused spouses stayed. He felt alone. He had no money, no resources.

Sleep was nightmarish. All night he felt like he was drowning. Dreams of wolves chasing him. In the morning, he felt worse than he ever had in his life. His stomach hurt, his eyes burned from lack of sleep. Work would be rough, but he couldn't stay in the apartment. Marsha would hover over him all day, making him sicker.

The day had just begun. He was sitting in the little break room, sipping a cup of coffee, listening to the guys when Marsha called. To check on him. She wanted to make sure he was keeping his butt at work today. None of this strange running off to watch tourists business.

He sighed softly as he hung up the phone. Rick Watkins, his boss, stared at him. The look contained pity, it made Sean feel worse.

"You know Sean," he started, pushing his coffee cup a couple of inches across the table. "There's no sense staying if you're not happy."

"What?" Sean asked him.

"Staying in your marriage. I've got an ex-wife, you know. It was better after we split up."

"I can't leave," Sean shook his head. He wanted to tell him all the reasons he had to stick it out. All the reasons he had ever given. They didn't come to him though.

"Why can't you leave?"

"Marsha controls all the finances. I don't even have an ATM card." Sean felt pathetic. He had been reduced to Marsha's house boy. Humiliation washed over him.

"Go to the bank."

"She'd notice it immediately. I'd get to the airport and she'd track me down. Give me some excuse why I couldn't leave. And I'd stay."

Rick smiled, "I've been there myself. Took me several years to leave my wife. She was running around on me. I kept telling myself I had to stay for the kids or for the family or whatever else I could think of."

"What did you do?"

"I waited. One day, I realized I had had enough. I began planning my escape route. Called my sister to see if I could stay with her. She told me yes. Then one night, we took the kids to a movie. Ran into her boyfriend. Her and I had a knockdown drag out fight right there for everyone to see. She didn't have a leg to stand on. It was so public that she shrunk away. I took the kids and loaded them on a plane. We landed here and have been here since then."

"Somewhere public?" Sean's mind started working again.

"Yep, public. Best thing to do if you're afraid of her. Someone will eventually stand up with you or for you."

"Like my brothers."

"You thinking of something?"

"My family reunion," Sean sighed. "Of course, I'll have to get one of my brothers to buy my plane ticket until I can get out."

"I'll front you the money. Take it out of your last check." Rick stood up.

"No, I'll call..."

"No, Sean. I've been waiting for you to dump that witch since you started working here. I'll buy a plane ticket anywhere you want to go. Hell, I'll even buy you a drink if you go through with it."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes sir, yes I am. Marsha is bad news, just like my ex wife."

Rick dragged Sean into the office. He booked Sean a one-way flight to Boston. Sean knew Asher would let him stay. He considered calling him and telling him, but stopped. Sean was worried saying it out loud would make it disappear.

That night, he went out drinking with the boys for the first time since his bachelor party. They weren't his brothers, but they weren't a bad substitute. Of course, by this time next week, he intended to be downing celebratory drinks with Asher and maybe Anna.

A Scattering of Ashes

5 p.m.

Asher picked Anna up and went to the airport. Anna hates to fly, but she soldiered through it. He heard her exhale a little harder than normal when they touched down, but otherwise she was fine. They checked into their hotel and after a quick dinner, went to their rooms, sleeping until morning.

The alarm blared. Ash rolled over and turned it off. The morning was going to be long and disastrous. As promised, Anna met him in the lobby. They took a taxi to his uncle's house. His uncle has a large garage type building that the Davidson's hold their family reunions in.

"Asher, a taxi? Why didn't you call? Someone would have come picked you up. Why are you even bothering to stay in a hotel? You can stay at our house." Sheila said, walking out of the building. "Hello, Arianna."

"Anna didn't want to intrude on you guys." He sort of lied.

"Nonsense, Arianna is more than welcome to stay with us. I spoke with your mother this week, Arianna. She seems to be doing well."

"Yes, Sheila, she is doing fine."

"Amazing considering what she's been through this past year, what with her getting cancer and all." Sheila whispered the word "cancer" as though it was a bad word.

"She's a strong woman." Arianna's answer was curt.

"Must be." His mother turned back to him. "I insist you stay with us tonight."

"Mom, I've already paid for my room for tonight."

"You never stay with us." She stuck out her bottom lip. The signature pout of Sheila when she feels her children are abusing her.

"Marsha and Sean always stay with you. Then there's Phil, Tonya and their three kids, there isn't room for me. Especially this year, since Anna is with me."

"Whatever." His mom turned her attention back to Anna. "You're thin as a rail, Arianna. Don't you eat in Boston? Come get some food."

Anna followed her into the building, her lips pursed together. Ash knew the look and was pretty sure this was going to cost him more than tickets to the Boston Pops Orchestra. He stood out front for a few more minutes, not wanting to go in. There was a reason none of the boys had stayed near their parents. His oldest brother, Phillip had moved to Augustus, Maine. Ash had moved to Boston. Sean, the middle child, had been in college when their parents decided to move to Portland. For this reason only, he had stayed in New Orleans.

After standing outside for two or three minutes, Asher gave in and went indoors. The air was smoky and already smelled strongly of beer. In the corner, a table had been set up for cards. Six men sat around it playing poker. At the back of the room stood the buffet table, it was loaded down with all kinds of food. Half of which would cause food poisoning. He always ate light and then grabbed a big dinner when he left.

Anna stood at the buffet table, Sheila was loading her up a plate. Anna also knew better than to eat it. She'd push it around for a while then when no one was looking, she'd pitch it. Sheila was always telling Arianna to eat something.

Sean walked over to him. "Hey, Ash, how's it going?" They hugged.

"Look at where we are. How do you think it's going?"

"I see you managed to get Anna to come. What'd that cost you?"

"Tickets to the Boston Pops. Although, I imagine when we get back, the price will go up."

"Can't say I blame her. How's Boston?"

"Love Boston, tired of the weather though."

"Marsha has me moving to Tennessee in a couple of weeks."

"What's in Tennessee?"

"Some hot shot lawyer job." Sean looked at Anna. "She's looking good. Boston seems to agree with her."

"It's Anna, she's adaptable to anything. Even the most adverse conditions...hell, she's hung around this family all her life, that proves she's a survivor." Ash laughed. "Where's the wife?"

"If I'm lucky, playing chicken with semis on the interstate. However, I've never been very lucky, so I'm sure she's around here trying to fix everything that's wrong with the family."

"She's got her work cut out for her." Marsha was essentially a non-topic between Sean and Asher. They had agreed to disagree several years ago. If they talked about it too much, Ash would get pissed at him. "Why'd you want my flight information?"

"Have you ever noticed that Marsha and mom get along great?"

"Is this a trick question?"

Sean laughed, "no, it's not a trick question."

"Well, I'm going to plead the fifth anyway."

"All right, you do that. I was driving home from Tennessee, listening to Marsha talk about our new life and how great it was going to be and it hit me. I realized that mom and Marsha are exactly alike and that's why they act so buddy-buddy."

"Ok."

"I threw a party when mom and dad left Louisiana, do you remember that?"

"Vaguely."

"Then I married a woman exactly like her. How sick is that? I don't even like mom. So, I'm hoping my little brother will open both his heart and his home to me."

"Is Marsha coming?"

"Nope. I haven't told her yet, but I bought a ticket for Boston right after we hung up. I figure I don't have anything in New Orleans that I can't live without. I'll file for a divorce once I've gotten settled in. Or she will as soon as she gets back to New Orleans. What do you think?"

"Are you serious Sean?"

"Yeah, I am." He looked at Asher. "I'm thirty-three years old and married to the wicked bitch of the south. If I don't change something right now, I never will. I'm not in love with Marsha anymore, hell I don't think I ever was. Surely, there's something better..." He stopped talking.

"Sean," Anna hugged him. "It's good to see you. Do you realize that I have lived in Boston six years and you've never come for a visit. Hell, your brother's lived there fourteen years and you've never visited."

"I like to travel light and my wife produces lots of extra baggage."

"How is your wife?"

"Not all that great...at least, not after this weekend. I'm returning to Boston with you and Asher."

"Finally gonna come for a visit?"

"No, to stay."

Anna's eyes widened. "You're leaving Marsha?" The shock was apparent in her voice. She had spent the last couple of years referring to Sean as "Marsha's house-boy". Anna had always been pretty bitter about Sean marrying Marsha.

"Yep." Sean smiled.

"Well, I think congrats are in order, but I'm afraid to give them just yet." Anna looked at Sean. Sean reached over and hugged her again. She smiled and walked away.

"Where are the two of you staying?"

"In one of the Hilton's downtown." Asher said.

"Good, I'm going to tell everyone at the end of the reunion. I'll probably need some place to stay. Do you mind if I crash there or would three in a room be odd?"

"Anna and I have separate rooms."

"Why do you have separate rooms?"

"Anna complains I snore too loudly."

"She's right. You do snore loudly."

"Sorry, nothing I can do about it. Besides when she stays in my room, she crimps my sex life." Asher looked at him, wondering if he was serious. "Are you really going to do this?"

"Yes, I'm sick of it, Asher. I live three blocks from the French Quarter and I'm banned from going there. I'm supposed to move to Memphis and I'm banned from going to Beale Street. Hell, we took a trip to Las Vegas and I wasn't allowed to go to the Strip. I've been to all these great places and never seen the things that make them great. In the last three years, I have been to the theatre fourteen times. Yet I've only seen three plays because Marsha keeps dragging me to see Rent. I didn't like it the first time I saw it, ten times later and I still don't like it."

"Why'd you stick to it this long then?"

"Because I thought things would change...no, not thought, hoped they would change. Marsha was great when we first started dating, the first year was great and then, then something happened. It went downhill in a hurry after that. I was waiting for things to right themselves. They aren't going to."

"Feel free to crash with me in the hotel and you can stay at my place as long as you want." Asher hugged him again.

The afternoon dragged on for eternity. Anna and Asher stuck to themselves. Talking to family only when approached. Ash was more concerned with Sean, he watched him interact. Sean seemed happier than Ash had seen him in ages. Even Phil noticed the change in him. Finally, all the pictures were taken, all the food packed away.

Anna poked Asher in the ribs and pointed. Sean had picked up a microphone and was staring out at the family. They quieted down and looked at him. Marsha shot him a look. Ash was pretty sure it meant that Sean wasn't supposed to embarrass her.

"We need to get closer. This is going to go badly." Asher took Anna's hand and pulled her near the platform Sean was standing on. To his surprise, Phil and Tonya, joined them.

"He told you then?" Phil whispered, Ash and Anna both nodded.

"I have an announcement to make." Sean looked out at room. "It's taken me a long time to get up the nerve to make this announcement, but I've gotten it. There's no one else I would rather tell first than my family. Well, actually, my brothers already know. I told them first." He laughed. Ash had expected it to come out sounding nervous, but it didn't. "As I'm sure you all know, Marsha and I have been married ten years now. She was recently offered a partnership in a law firm in Memphis, Tennessee." There was a round of applause. Marsha smiled and nodded. "She's making plans to move there next month." Sean continued when the applause had quieted. "I have decided that I don't want to move to Memphis. This of course, has nothing to do with the city. The city of Memphis is wonderful and I recommend everyone go just once. I am moving to Boston. Asher has been nice enough to agree to let me move in with him. I'm sure Marsha will be very happy in Memphis. I wish her the best of luck with her new job and her new life."

The family got noisy quick. Marsha was pissed. Sean dropped the microphone and stepped off the platform. Phil clapped him on the back, Tonya hugged him. Asher moved in closer to his side. "Wicked bitch of the south looks like she's going to explode. Any time you're ready to go..." he whispered.

Sean turned around and looked at Marsha. She moved within three feet of him. "What are you talking about, Sean?" She asked.

"I'm leaving you, Marsha. You make me miserable. I can't believe it took me thirteen years to figure it out, but it did." Phil moved up, flanking Sean's left side. Ash stood his ground on Sean's right as Marsha moved in closer.

"This doesn't concern either of you." She snipped at them.

"He's our brother, it does concern us." Tonya said, taking hold of Phil's hand.

"I wasn't talking to you."

"I'm just as much a part of this family as you are. Oh wait, I'm more family than you are."

"Sean, this is ridiculous, what are you going to do in Boston?"

"Well, Marsha, I am a mechanic, I can get a job anywhere. Who knows, I might even open me a little shop to tinker on cars in."

"Oh please. You'll never make it."

"Yes, I will." Sean stepped towards her. "I've always been capable of making it. Especially with the help of my brothers."

"Sean, what is this nonsense about leaving Marsha?" Their mother walked towards them. Anna grabbed her shoulder, steering her away. Tonya went to help.

"And just how long do you think your brothers' charity will last? They each have lives. They aren't going to want you disrupting them for long. Especially Asher, he's single with no responsibilities. Think he's going to let you live with him for forever?"

"If that's what it takes, Marsha, then Sean is more than welcome in my house." Ash looked down at the floor for a second. "Besides, I don't think Sean will be a burden to me for very long."

"Then you don't know your brother very well, Asher. He's done his best to hold me back for years."

"Hold you back?" Phil yelled. "Sean is the one who was held back. He's been wanting to open a shop for years and you never would let him."

"Well, frankly, I thought I was marrying an engineer, not a mechanic. But Sean just couldn't do that. No, he had to start working on cars instead of skyscrapers."

"I like working on cars." Sean yelled at her. "I don't care how disappointed you are. It's what I enjoy doing. It's the only thing I've ever wanted to do. You're the one who pushed me to get the engineering degree."

"Well excuse me for thinking you had potential to be something great."

"He is great, he's a great mechanic." Ash yelled at her.

"Oh, of course, I should have known, Asher. This is your doing. Sean never would've betrayed me like this if you hadn't encouraged him. But he always looked up to his little brother. You say jump and Sean starts hopping like a jack-rabbit on fire. You will regret this Sean."

"I doubt that, Marsha. I would be willing to lay a wager that Sean isn't lonely for long." Ash said smiling.

"Oh really, you think he'll find someone else to put up with his dreaminess? Someone who can support him?"

"Actually, I happen to know a psychologist who is going to be very interested in Sean's being single." Ash continued smiling at her. "I figure he'll take a couple of months to get over you and then I'll hardly ever see him."

"It was your doing." Marsha turned her back to Ash. Sean looked at him, a surprised look. "So, I guess I was right not to let him come visit you in Boston. You would have had him shacked up with some whore."

"She's not a whore." Asher felt my teeth clinch.

"Oh, really? Well, she's here on your arm today, but tomorrow I guess you'll just turn her over to Sean."

"Shut up, Marsha." Sean spat back at her.

Marsha slugged Asher. The blow landed squarely on his jaw. Stars danced before his eyes.

When Asher woke up, he was lying on the hard concrete floor. Sean and Phil were kneeling next to him. He could hear Tonya screaming at someone. Through the fog, he didn't know who it was.

"Ash, can you hear me?" Phil asked.

"Yeah, I can hear you. My head hurts."

"Usually does when it bounces off concrete." Sean took hold of his hand. "Anna wants to examine you."

"Anna's a psychologist, not an M.D."

"True, but she still has medical training." Sean looked up. Ash followed him with his eyes. Anna was getting out a pin light.

"Ash, on a scale of one to ten, how badly does your head hurt?" She asked.

"I don't know...a six. What exactly happened?"

"You have a glass jaw." Phil chuckled. "One sucker punch from Marsha and you were down for the count. Tonya and dad are taking Marsha out of here."

"You still going to leave her?" Ash asked Sean.

"She just punched out my brother. Do you really think I'd go back to her after seeing that?"

"Anything's possible."

"Asher, sit up. Let me know if it makes you dizzy." Anna instructed.

"Yep, it makes me dizzy." He leaned forward, sticking his head down near his knees.

"I think you need to go to the hospital." She handed the flashlight to someone.

"I just love these family reunions." Sean said.

"Yeah, this was the best one yet." Phil laughed again.

"Hey, if the rest are this exciting, I might not mind coming to next year's." Anna laughed.

"I think next time, I'll get the flu the day before I'm suppose to fly out." Ash straightened up slowly. "Especially if next year's involves me getting punched again."

A Happy Ending

The plane touched down in Boston. Sean's knees felt weak. He couldn't believe he had escaped. He couldn't believe Marsha was flying to New Orleans to pack her shit and move to Memphis. He figured she'd toss all his stuff out. The thought didn't worry him.

Phil clapped his hand on Sean's shoulder, pushing him forward. Phil had flown to Boston with him. The three brothers had every intention of living large for a couple of days. They would sleep late, drink heavily and eat take-out until their stomachs went into revolt. At least, that was the plan. Sean doubted it would happen. He had no money, no job and no home. Ash was giving up the spare room to him. Phil was taking the living room for a couple of days.

All of Sean's belongings were packed into a suitcase. Four shirts, four pairs of jeans, some socks, some underwear, hygiene products and music. He'd left his books, gadgets, gizmos and appliances in the apartment in New Orleans. Marsha had all that stuff. Sean doubted she'd leave it in tact. She might pack it up and ship it to him, but it would all be broken or ruined. Sean was fine with that. He was just happy to be rid of her.

Sheila had flipped out. Threatening and cajoling him, trying to convince him to come to his senses. Dan though, Dan had congratulated him. Told Sean he wished only happiness for his sons and Marsha didn't fit into the picture very well.

They dropped Anna off at her apartment then headed to Asher's. They needed to unpack and rest. Sean needed to shop, buy some more stuff to wear. First though, they stopped at a bank.

It felt like a dream as the three boys ushered themselves inside. The name rang a bell with Sean, but he wasn't sure why. The teller looked at him.

"I'd like to make a withdraw and get an ATM card for this account." Asher said to her.

"What are we doing?" Sean asked.

"When you got married, Phil and I began an account." Ash signed his name to a form.

"Yeah an emergency funds account for you." Phil picked up the thread of conversation. "We knew Marsha controlled your paychecks and that if you ever left you'd need money."

"This is a national chain bank," Asher handed the woman his driver's license. "Every month, Phil and I put back a little money in this account. It has both our names on it. Now we'll need to add yours."

"You guys have been putting back money for me?" Sean was dazed. He felt like he was trying to breathe under water.

"Yep, every month for 10 very long years," Phil spoke again. "Tonya's been helping too."

"And Anna." Ash jumped in again. "It hasn't been much. I save my change every month and toss it into this account."

"Tonya and I do the same. Also, we give you bonuses for your birthdays and at Christmas."

"Anna uses only round numbers in her checkbook, so at the end of each month, she tosses that extra money here in." Asher was speaking again. The two of them were talking so fast, Sean was having trouble keeping up.

"Hey, Tonya and I do that too." Phil laughed. The laugh seemed to wake Sean. He stared at his brothers, finally understanding what they were saying.

"The four of you have been saving money for me since I got married. What would have happened if I had never left Marsha?"

"Then we would have given it to you when you retired." Asher handed him a stack of money. He counted it. $200 total, more than he had held in his hand since he had gotten married. It seemed foreign to him. He almost handed it back to Asher.

"How much is in there?" Sean asked.

Asher looked at Phil. They exchanged a smile, then Asher handed the transaction stub to Sean. It took him a minute to find the remaining balance, but when he did, tears welled up.

"I can't take all of this." Sean handed the stub back to Asher. "I appreciate it, I really do, but..."

"Yes you can and you will." Phil wrapped his arm around you. "It gives you enough to start replacing what you've lost. It can't make up for ten years of misery, but it will hold you over until you find a new job and get settled in Boston."

"Yep and since you live rent free, I expect you to buy the first round of drinks. However, home first. We need showers and naps." Asher wrapped his arm around Sean from the other side.

"Yep and then we need to reintroduce our brother to the good life." Phil chuckled again. "And you have to buy me two drinks for punching me at your wedding."

"And girls." Asher winked at Sean. "Lots of girls. I expect girls to be flowing in and out of my apartment as often as possible."

"Um..." Sean frowned.

"Girls, Sean, you remember what girls are right?" Phil teased.

"Well, it..." how could he tell his brothers?

"Sean?" Asher stopped moving as they reached the car. "You do remember what girls are for right?"

"Yes I remember," Sean snapped.

"When was the last time?" Phil asked him.

Sean's marriage had been bad almost from the beginning. The last couple of years had been downright miserable. He had thought about going outside his marriage and always pulled back.

"Sean?" Asher touched his shoulder.

"Two years, maybe..." or three, Sean added in his head.

"Two years?!" Phil nearly yelled. "No wonder you guys don't have any children. Jeez man, that would have been enough to make me leave."

"There's more to life than sex," Asher pushed Sean into the car.

"People only say that to make others feel better," Phil climbed in behind the driver's wheel.

"No, they say it because it's true. Ask Anna. She's a therapist, she knows about these things."

"Anna must not be getting any either." Phil remarked.

"Hm," Asher seemed to think for a minute. "You may be right, I haven't seen her dating anyone in a while."

"So, girls and booze. I think we can begin our quest this evening for those two all important things."

"No girls for me," Phil smiled. "Tonya would kill me. Send her home with three kids so I can get some nookie on the side. I'll be living here with you two."

"Not for us," Asher hit Phil. "For Sean. We get to drink. Sean gets the girls."

"Well that works," Phil smiled as they pulled into Asher's apartment complex.

"No girls, I'm not ready for all that." Sean mumbled climbing from the backseat.

"Two years?" Phil wrapped his arm around him again. "That's all your ready for. Hey Ash, do you know any hookers?"

"Hookers?" A female voice said from inside the apartment. "Are you hard up, Phil?"

"Not now that you're here," Phil gave a wink to Anna. She walked over and hugged him.

"I figured you guys would already be out doing male bonding things." She hugged Ash. "I'm so glad you're here Sean."

She hugged Sean last. Sean could feel every curve of her body. Suddenly, two years felt like an eternity.

About the Author

Hadena James began writing at the age of 8. By the time she graduated high school, she had published a couple of short stories in literary magazines. She completed writing her first novel at 17. Hadena began college as an English major, but quickly changed to a history major. However, she pursued her writing and took several extra classes in creative writing.

College showed her that while she could write short stories, novel writing was truly where her heart lay. She graduated from the University of Missouri with a degree in European History with minors in German and Russian Studies. She currently runs her own business.

After years of rejection letters from large publishing companies and literature clearing houses, Hadena self-published her first novel in September 2012. Her second one was published in November of the same year. In retrospect, she is appreciative of the rejection letters, because they taught her where her writing had weaknesses.

Hadena's primary literary genre is action/thriller. She currently writes two series, both use the action/thriller as their first genre. "The Brenna Strachan Series" uses fantasy as its secondary genre and the "Dreams & Reality Series" uses murder mystery as its secondary genre. She continues to explore and expand her genre writing and hopes to soon produce an action/thriller with comedy as a secondary genre.

When she isn't busy writing or running her business, Hadena enjoys playing in a steel-tip dart league. She loves to travel throughout North America and Europe. Her favorite cities to visit are Chicago, Illinois and Berlin, Germany. She is an avid reader, with her favorites being classic literature; Edgar Allen Poe, HP Lovecraft, Gaston LeRoux, and Jane Austen; modern favorites include Clive Barker, James Patterson, Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams. Her favorite book is "Good Omens" by Neil Gaimen and Terry Pratchett. She writes all of her books while listening to music and the bands tend to get "honorable mentions" within the pages. Some of her favorite bands are Nine Inch Nails, KMFDM, Rammstein, U2, Marilyn Manson, Oomph!, and Rob Zombie.

Tortured Dreams

(The First in the Dreams & Reality Series)

January 2013

People love a good horror story, especially when it is real. I have a Ph.D. in History. I wrote my thesis on the evolution of torture as a crime deterrent in the Middle Ages. I didn't set out to write that as my thesis, but like everything else, a thesis evolves. My name is Aislinn Cain and my life is a horror story.

I have survived two encounters with serial killers. The first time, I was only eight years old. The second, I was 19 and graduating from college. Normality is not something I have ever experienced.

My best friends are Nyleena Clachan, lawyer and Malachi Blake, FBI Agent. Nyleena remains my friend despite my being a violence magnet. Malachi relishes it, it feeds his psychopathic needs.

I've been asked to work as a consultant with the US Marshals to track down a serial killer who is using various torture methods from the Middle Ages. However, the closer we get to catching them, the further into the past the three of us most go and confront demons that we had forgotten existed.

