Something positive can come out of the public
tragedies of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain:
A recognition that anxiety and depression
can afflict anyone – no matter how accomplished
or emotionally well they appear to us.
If you are depressed.
If you have had thoughts of harming yourself.
If you feel unimportant – that no one would
care whether you were alive or not.
If you have had moments of paralyzing anxiety
that go beyond the daily sadness and frustrations
of life:
Get help.
Don’t wait.
Find a therapist.
Speak with one of us – one of the rabbis.
Seek a friend.
Talk with someone.
Don’t suffer alone.
Overcome any lingering stigma that emotional
pain might still have in our era.
Professionals broadly agree – that speaking
about mental health does not increase the
risk of self-harm: To the contrary – it
allows the emotionally burdened some relief
and incentive to find support.
There is an unprecedented mental health crisis
in our country.
Officials describe it as an “epidemic.”
Millions are addicted to pain killers and
drugs of all kinds.
Millions more are addicted to alcohol.
Why are so many so burdened?
We are healthier than ever – wealthier than
ever – more educated than ever – more
technologically advanced than ever.
We have more free time – than any generation
that preceded us.
We live longer than any generation that ever
walked the face of the earth.
We have more food than any previous generation.
We are suffering – not from lack of food
– the scourge of the human race until our
parents were born - but from too much food.
There is an obesity epidemic in America.
Our lives should be easier.
Disorder, disharmony and uncertainty have
always been part of the human experience – but
what is it about the way we live today that
contributes to our inability to cope?
We are more connected than ever – but seem
lonelier than ever.
We feel more isolated than ever.
More fractured than ever.
How could it be that in a world where everyone
is within instant electronic reach of everyone
else – how could it be that we are so lonely?
That we are so isolated emotionally?
At one in the same - the world has never been
more open, more accessible, more unified - and
yet, more fragmented.
The very connectedness and shrinking of the
world - that was supposed to bind us in a
common thread of humanity – has isolated
us.
We find ourselves more and more – alone
– and more and more distanced and polarized
from our fellows.
We have thousands of virtual friends but lack intimacy.
We spend hours updating Facebook followers
what we had for breakfast this morning - we
spend days in chat rooms, talking sense and
nonsense - and yet - we feel that no one is
listening.
The human creature needs to be listened to.
I suspect that the wizards of technology who
designed our smart phones and social media
platforms – purposely created devices that
would hook us into using their product more.
I suspect that side-by-side with technicians
- brain chemistry experts helped to design
machines that light up the centers of our
brains - that crave recognition and attention.
There is a reason that half of New York’s
pedestrians no longer bother to look up from the sidewalk – staring
instead into their machines.
What are they looking for?
What are they waiting for – the next shot
of dopamine produced by a tweet from Justin
Bieber – just to me?
Justin Bieber is a friend?
I am completely committed to science and technology.
Judaism is too.
Our Sages clarified – if something ails
you – seek – not divine intervention - seek
medical intervention.
Go to a doctor – you fool.
Then pray.
If a doctor tells you to take a pill – whether
for physical or emotional pain – and you
trust your doctor – take the pill.
Bear in mind that medical science – especially
when it comes to mental health – is still
in relative infancy.
We do not understand enough the short and
long-term effects of drugs and doses.
Still – if your therapist tells you that
the wiring in your brain can be positively
changed synthetically – and you trust your
therapist – take the drug.
Even from a theological perspective – nothing
about religion can be contradicted by science.
I have never understood the antagonism some
believers have towards science.
Physics is not the enemy of religion.
Physics informs us how God created the universe.
Judaism not only permits – but requires
us - to conquer the ills of society using
all means at our disposal – including science
and technology.
It is one reason why so many doctors and scientists
are Jewish.
But – not every problem has a synthetic
solution.
This – is the idolatry of the age – the
false belief that the goddess of technology
can solve every problem.
No medical procedure can produce wisdom.
No pill can guarantee tranquility – peace
of mind – self-love, self-fulfillment, and
self-acceptance.
Cataracts removal will improve your eyesight
– but not your vision of life.
Endoscopy can examine our stomach but will
tell us nothing about our guts.
Angioplasty can repair our heart – but cannot
give us heart.
The latest fad diet might reduce our weight
– but not the heaviness of life.
We now have specialists who write hundreds
of books and give thousands of lectures a
year that analyze what state we are in: All
kinds of self-help gurus – who themselves
– are the product of the very disorders
and confusions of our day they seek to cure.
There is no medical shortcut – no biotechnological
breakthrough – no algorithm – that will
grant us understanding, forbearance and endurance
- in the face of inevitable tragedy, absurdity,
failure and disappointment.
Wisdom is acquired 
drop by drop – through the awful grace of
God.
Avoid the temptation to Googleize your life.
No tablet can cure our addiction to the Tablet.
Peace of mind, tranquility, happiness, self-love,
self-worth and self-fulfillment - cannot be
discovered on a website.
Our objective is not a website but insight.
Our purpose is not information but inspiration.
Human nature has not changed.
We still need friends: Not only virtual friends;
but virtuous friends; not only Facebook friends,
but face-to-face friends.
We still need community - that values us as
individuals with whatever imperfection or
disfigurement we may have.
We still need to be listened to in order to
believe in life.
If we are alone – we suffocate – the walls
encroaching upon – and eventually - surrounding
- us.
If you feel suffocated – reach out – to
anyone and everyone.
Your life is precious.
People care about you.
Jewish tradition is obsessively focused on
you – the individual person.
The human being is not an abstract concept
in Judaism.
The individual is at the center of Jewish
law.
Our faith insists that the human creature
is uniquely endowed with dignity.
Va’tichassrehu me’at me’Elohim – u’chevod
ve’hadar te’a’tre’hu
“You have made us little less than divine”
– wrote the Psalmist – “and adorned
us with dignity, honor, glory and majesty.”
You are distinctive and special.
Resist any contemporary norm – or so-called
expert - that seeks to diminish or suppress
your personal worth.
You are not – simply - a more highly evolved
monkey.
You are adorned with honor and glory.
Each of us is equal in the sight of God – possessing
equal worth and equal dignity – no matter
what station we are at in life – what is
our net worth – what is our social status
or achievements.
The immigrant at the border – the refugee
fleeing war with nothing but the clothes on
her back and the baby at her breast – are
equal to the highest and mightiest official.
This is the essence of religion – and the
essence of Judaism.
The ability to recognize your glory – is
the unique gift of being human.
We, alone, have self-awareness:
The Sages teach:
“Beloved is Man who was created in the image
of God.
It was an act of still greater love – that
it was made known to us that we were created
in the image of God.”
Self-knowledge and the capacity for reflection
- consciousness of ourselves - is a gift uniquely
endowed to us, the pinnacle of all creation.
But also know this about yourself:
This gift often burdens us.
We have no rest.
Our hearts are heavy and our minds are perplexed.
When we suffer we are aware of our suffering
and this awareness creates a uniquely human
response.
“Why did I not die at birth,” Job proclaims.
Judaism knows we will suffer.
Our tradition tells us that we will both triumph
and fail.
We will move forward and fall backward.
We will conquer and retreat.
The Sages urged us to keep going – a human
creature forever dignified – in both victory
and defeat.
Know – that you matter.
You are not alone.
You are not a cog in the wheel.
You are not invisible.
People care about you.
The community cares about you.
God cares about you.
To live – is to need help.
Help me – I am depressed.
Help me – I am alone.
Help me - I am confused.
Help me – I am misunderstood.
Help me – I am outcast.
Help me – I am vulnerable.
Help me – I am ill.
May we devote ourselves to helping and healing.
When I was suffering – you comforted me
When I was lonely – you embraced me
When I was vulnerable – you prayed with
me
When I was empty – you inspired me
When I was hopeless – you dreamed with me
When I was weary – you invigorated me
When I was sad – you cried with me
When I was happy – you rejoiced with me
When I was searching – you found me
When I was conflicted – you soothed me
When I was outcast – you took me back.
