COOPER.
[ APPLAUSE ]
BY THE WAY, ON THE SUBJECT OF 
ELECTRICITY, DID YOU SEE GAYLE 
KING AND R. KELLY?
IF YOU DON'T KNOW, HE'S FACING 
TEN COUNTS OF AGGRAVATED SEXUAL 
ABUSE, INCLUDING SEXUAL ACTS 
WITH THREE MINORS, WHICH HE DO 
DOES
DENY.
HE SAYS ONLY A DUMB WE HOLD 
SOMEBODY AGAINST THEIR WILL.
>> CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG, YOU 
HAVE NEVER HELD ANYBODY AGAINST 
THEIR WILL.
>> I DON'T NEED TO, WHY WOULD I?
HOW STUPID WOULD IT BE FOR R. 
KELLY, WITH ALL I'VE BEEN 
THROUGH IN MY WAY, WAY PAST TO 
HOLD SOMEBODY LET ALONE FOUR, 
FIVE, SIX, 50, YOU SAID, HOW 
STUPID WOULD I BE TO DO THAT?
>> I DIDN'T SAY THAT -- 
>> HOW STUPID, GUYS.
IS THIS CAMERA ON ME?
>> YES.
>> THAT'S STUPID!
>> Jimmy: THIS IS NOT A STUPID 
MAN.
ALLOW ME TO READ A FEW SELECT 
LYRICS FROM A SONG CALLED "THE 
ZOO."
IT GOES SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
GIRM
GIRL, I GOT YOU SO WET LIKE A 
RAINFOREST, LIKE JURASSIC PARK, 
EXCEPT I'M YOUR SEX-A-SAURUS.
WOULD A STUPID PERSON KNOW THERE
ARE KANGAROOS CRAWLING IN THE 
WOODS?
>> HE CRAWLED THROUGH THE 
CABINET.
NOW HE'S OPENING THE CAB NET.
NOW PAUSE THE MOVIE, BECAUSE 
WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY TO Y'ALL 
IS SO DAMN TWISTED.
NOT ONLY IS THERE A MAN IN THE 
CABINET, BUT THE MAN IS A 
MIDGET, MIDGET, MIDGET.
>> Jimmy: THERE'S NOTHING STUPID
ABOUT THAT.
IT'S HARD TO DENY YOU WOULD 
IMPRISON A WOMAN WHEN YOU WROTE 
A 33-PAGED OPERA CALLED TRAPPED.
HE CLAIMS HE DID NOT DO THIS 
STUFF.
>> Y'ALL QUIT PLAYIN', QUIT 
PLAYIN'.
>> ROBERT.
>> I DIDN'T DO THIS STUFF.
THIS IS NOT ME.
I'M FIGHTING FOR MY [ BLEEP ] 
LIFE.
Y'ALL ARE KILLING ME WITH THIS.
I -- [ BLEEP ], 
>> ROBERT.
>> Y'ALL TRYIN' TO KILL ME!
YOU KILLIN' ME NOW.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT MUSIC.
I'M TRYING TO HAVE A 
RELATIONSHIP WITH MY KIDS, AND I
CAN'T DO IT!
Y'ALL JUST DON'T WANT TO BELIEVE
IT'S TRUE.
YOU DON'T WANT TO BELIEVE IT.
>> Jimmy: IS THERE ANYONE COOLER
THAN GAYLE KING?
SHE'S JUST LIKE ROBERT.
WHATEVER ZEN MEDITATION CLASS 
SHE'S TAKING, SIGN ME UP.
BECAUSE THE INTERVIEW REVEALED A
NUMBER OF DISTURBING THINGS 
ABOUT R. KELLY, ONE OF THEM 
BEING HE LIVES IN TRUMP TOWER, 
AND HE KEEPS A CHRISTMAS TREE UP
ALL YEAR.
HE LOVES CHRISTMAS THAT MUCH.
R. KELLY ATTEMPTED TO PORTRAY 
HIMSELF AS THE VICTIM.
HE TRIED THE OLD, I CAN'T 
BELIEVE THE POLICE ARE FOCUSSED 
ON THIS WHERE THERE ARE REAL 
CRIMINALS OUT THERE.
>> THERE'S REAL GIRLS BEING 
ABDUCTED, BEING RAPED.
THEY REALLY ARE ON CHAINS.
THEY REALLY DO HAVE CHAINS ON 
THEIR WRISTS AND CAN'T GET OUT.
>> ROBERT, WE HAVE TO HAVE A 
CONVERSATION.
I DON'T WANT YOU JUST RANTING AT
THE CAMERA.
>> I CAME HERE FOR THEM TO HEAR 
ME TALK.
I NEED HELP.
>> WHAT KIND OF HELP?
>> THIS IS THE KIND OF HELP I 
NEED.
>> YES, WHAT KIND OF HELP?
>> I NEED SOMEBODY TO HELP ME 
NOT HAVE A BIG HEART, BECAUSE MY
HEART IS SO BIG.
PEOPLE BETRAY ME, AND I KEEP ON 
GIVING THEM!
>> Jimmy: WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE 
HELP R. KELLY GET A SMALLER 
HEART?
THE HEART HE HAS IS TOO BIG.
IT'S -- 
[ APPLAUSE ]
PUMPING TOO MUCH BLOOD.
THE BLOOD IS BEING PUMPED AWAY 
FROM HIS BRAIN AND TOO MUCH IS 
GOING TO HIS CRAZY PENIS, AND 
IT'S CAUSING PROBLEMS.
THIS PART IN PARTICULAR, I 
THINK, COULD GET R. NOMINATED 
FOR AN ACADEMY AWARD.
>> Y'ALL QUIT PLAYIN', QUIT 
PLAYIN'.
I DIDN'T DO THIS STUFF.
I'M FIGHTIN' FOR MY [ BLEEP ] 
LIFE.
Y'ALL ARE KILLIN' ME WITH THIS!
[ BLEEP ] 30 YEARS OF MY CAREER,
AND Y'ALL ARE TRYING TO KILL ME!
THIS IS NOT ABOUT MUSIC!
>> AT THIS POINT, WE BRIEFLY 
PAUSED THE INTERVIEW TO GIVE
