hey HOWDY hey everyone What is up VETISTHEFALLEN here and I got a quick
question for everyone have you guys ever
wanted dated a shark
well I sure do that is why I decided to
play this lovely crazy game right here
shark dating simulator so do I don't
watch about this game no let's begin
okay just gonna swim with the fishes
here ... where am I
why the last thing I remember it was
something about the ocean of course if
only I wasn't so groggy
cuz you know just headaches op cracked
open a few too many with the boys last
night you know
*MAKES DRINKING NOISES*
ah man those were the days those were
the days I tell you what oh hey big
booby lady you there wake up and smell the salt!
okay whatever your name is. OH your name is marina alright I will remember that what
the hell's your problem I have no woolgathering aboard my ship
woolgathering? it shouldn't it be like
lollygagging? I'm sorry I'm too busy
staring at your tits that's awkward
okay isn't this more of a small boat I
because it honestly it looks like a
small boat to me I mean you could see
the ropes there you could see your boobs
you could see your eyes and you just
look like you have this...you look
very salty your face just like I don't
know just bunch of it
don't give me any of your sass greenhorn
holy cow is this the kind of lame brain
scrub scuba school is sending out these
days apparently I am in scuba school ok how's
a fish science is supposed to work
with this kind of material it's an insult
to fish science says the lady who has a
very strange necklace of a dead fish now
honestly what are you a scientist
really of? the fish or the dead fish? I
mean come on I'm staring at your
necklace right there it's kinda awkward
alright now listen up you Neanderthals
sea sponge you have to do a job and you
better do it right
There's something mysterious going on these parts and I mean to find out what
it is says the miss boobie lady I'm
gonna call you boobie cleavage lady
because it's just there it's just
hanging out okay IF I could swim I go
myself but I can't that's your job
*Says Wait 6x*
Your a fish Scientist, But you can't swim?
and that's my job are you trying to say
you can't swim because I totally
understand that
all right enough chitchat get on with it
alright don't you ... me miss
boobie cleavage Oh what's with the goose
look you inbred you called me an inbred
well excuse me Miss *BABBLING SOUNDS*
let me do it a little bit I'm drooling
because of her cleavage is that awkward
it's totally awkward do you have a
question or something yes why are your
tits hanging out actually no I have a
question because I am doing a lot of
boob jokes I do want to ask are those
REAL? give the contents of your bulging
eyeballs I'm sure your to assume you're
talking about my breasts little pervert yes because I'm sorry
your cleavage is hanging out
it's kind of hard that's it I'm sorry no
actually no I'm not I'm sorry if you're
wearing something like that you're not
wearing anything under I bet you are
naked completely naked
Let me tell you something I'm one of the greatest fish scientists ever did science of fish
I bet you are you can science my fish any
time this has been my calling since I
was little and by God I intend to walk
away with the fish Nobel Prize one day
wait...there's a Nobel Prize for fish I'm like
thinking you don't know you know I don't
care whatever but fish science is a
man's world and I realized early on if I
wanted that prize I was going to need
more than a couple of bee sting dairy
Pillows to distract on Judges
shake my TATAS I'm sorry I can't I
can't take you seriously I understand
you're female in a man's world of fish
science and you know what more power to
you so I worked my perfect ass off as am
a team in a minute I thought that was
material many old fish lab assistants
for years saving hard to get into
getting the money I need to buy my
gigantic boat which by the way and by
the way I can't tell if you have a
perfect ass I can't see your hiney and I
paid the same guy who upgraded Carmen
Electra to give me big full dreamy shag
tile cans like this okay I can help it
in other words I pay hard-earned
courtesy for these two solid cash still
they're fake Wow good good to know good
to know if that doesn't make them real
than I for one don't know what does
mhm you give me a little swirl woah
language Lake no no you do not talk to
me about that just because you have
plastic contacts yes ma'am
sure I can't believe she'd calling me a
little shit good any more stupid
questions now or are you going to do
your damn job um honestly good bounce
did a little you have to be shitting me
right shitting up on you oh I'm sorry
okay you got more chance of getting your
hands on an orca scrotum then you have
touching me anywhere well okay you've
got some balls on you I'll give you that
thank you thank you
y'all got balls I got balls I got balls
everybody now listen if you were paying
attention to what's going on rather than
my double e's you know there's something
weird going on in the sea
sorry just job is the locals say they
are talking fish around these parts but
also they say that they won't sell it
face of Bob Hope and a pomegranate but I
happen to believe them all on this one
get into that ocean find out what's with
these fish for our hard commutes or the
gizzards it another woman who's feisty
in the work world that's why I married
my wife find a talking one catch it
alive and bring it back
yes sir Babs sir Madison ma'am sir Scott
Scott bitch she's pretty hot which is
mad
yeah although come to think of it I
haven't seen her being anything else yet
except for a little beach well bitter in
my pay I guess here goes nothing
ha-cha-cha please swimming in the ocean
causing a commotion swimming in the
ocean
checkpoint ah the majesty of life under
the ocean waves how am I honestly
talking in the water that's weird
now what I have to ask myself is if I
was a talking fish where would I be hmm
duh-duh-duh and miss marinas dream
that's where I'd be
mm yeah those jobless alright listening
to a lot of old fisherman's tales she
must have a sponge for a braid alright
let's check my gear oxygen shake
shark repellent alright I'm gonna need
that though I don't know why I need it
if this is a shark dating simulator I
mean unless they want some of this but
they can't have some of this
because I'm short repelling sandwiches
hmm they're probably soggy check I guess
maybe I should have them wrapped in
something yeah you think you're the
ocean and they just got soggy as fuck
way to go better get on with it so uh
where should I look for your let's look
behind that seaweed anything behind -
seaweed looks very promising
hello any little fish
well isn't that a cute little sea sea
sea slug hello there little guy how you
doing today
suck on that Bell
well excuse me what the hell wait wait
wait wait do you even have balls I mean
do you
dot dot dot check out my balls okay okay
I get it you want me to suck on your
balls but you know whatever fascinating
so the rumors are true there really are
talking sea critters down here how can
that be what twisted parity of nature's
this oh well honestly I thought I was
gonna make have to come up with some
material for this game
but it looks like it already has it for
me BAM I love it when everything comes
to you it's easy and how can I
communicate with them perfectly so well
in the water that's where I was just
saying a while ago how am I talking in
the water I mean honestly I'm not like
rub rub rub rub rub well in my problem
I'm no fish scientist after I guess I
should catch this little fella show him
to Marina jogger my bow actually maybe
lol you got balls oh nice as long as I
don't have to suck on them I bet they're
over there let's see if I can get in
there Oh what is it I do thank you did
you do a face hue with the shark oh I
can use these shark repellent I'm gonna
upside the head stupid shark that's right your faced with the marauding shark you gotta punch
it in the nose then the shark will lose
interest
swim away okay you pick the bones out of
this one
AAAAAAIEEEE You-You horrible beast
well it was in self-defense
you came after me and I just BAM
*HAS COUGHING FIT*
you're making me cough underwater that's
even awkward
*shark cries*
wait wait? me violent you were going to
chow down on me what do you expect me to
didn't have to hit me you rotter I did actually what you want some more you want to go you
want a tussle I'll punch you right in
the nose I'll do it
I'm down let's go come at me bro or sis
or bro sis
you got balls cuz I punch the shark in
the nose help someone get this ruffian
away from me Prissie bitch Wow hi I
never knew I had it in me.
BAM stupid shark I better split before
it has a chance to get mad about Adele
I've seen enough for one day back to the
boat and it's a checkpoint and I'm safe
at last and that was kind of an unusual experienced but uh hey what's up
*LOTS OF BABBLING*
B-back already I'm almost semi impressed so let's see
what you've got oh boy do I have one hell of a story for
you A story save it for bedtime when you have your
hideous children
*FLIPS OFF THE TITTY LADY*
it's all I gotta say to you woman I want
results
I wanted talking fish so hand it over
uh well I am I I don't have it you know
Like i said  funny story I kind of like
BOPPED it in the nose so well there's a
*MONKEY APE NOISES*
well there was this shark down there and of course there was a shark down there you numbskull these
are shark-infested waters you find
donuts in a donut shop you find sharks
and shark this is what but you never
never do you find a shark in a donut
shop actually there is once that you
know it though do I make myself clear
crystal maybe perfectly fish sauce holy
Helen and the higher on this boat has
run out I've got to take it back coming
back here tomorrow you punk and the
extra day just spoke tires coming out of
your wages man wired mail still useless
oh my god honestly you guys she sounds
exactly like my mother-in-law she does I
mean just does okay anyway you know I
know they don't know a TARDIS I've
turned it so I'm gonna talk back to you
woman if you think sharks are no big
deal you're doing
I can't you spaz mo did I already tell
you I can't swim oh yeah I forgot
well considering you're a fish scientist
maybe you ought to learn I did learn and
it's not that I don't know how it's just
these are Kirsten breasteses have a
conservative positive buoyancy so when I
jump in the water it goes grow you mean
they float that's what I said good god
you're hardware
sometimes these fabulous sweater puppies
of mine are just too difficult to handle
do not send repeat do not say anything
ah
I bet I could handle them oh shit huh
nice going now
fuck you break you're not the boss of me
yes actually I am
what the hell is wrong with you how dare
you despise my breastesses do it sultry
eye don't you just stand there drooling
all to yourself
excuse me okay we're good if I had the
time to hire someone who doesn't have
the brain cell that just blew through
these schools through tender every night
I would but I don't actually I I know I
know two guys far on tender every night
you know I could ask them to hook up
with you cuz you know that's how it
works
whatever sick of this hey I'm taking her
back
we'll return tomorrow
oh great that'll be something to look
forward to well what if I see that shark
again don't just punch it in the nose
again well if I do I'll just give it
another what yeah i'll on this now ain't
no shock to mess with me yo coming back
tomorrow they're busting shark as I lay
in bed that night strange questions
torment my life Moreno is white but how
can fish talk what's been going down
there
why have I all graduates of scuba school
been chosen to solve this strange
mystery why was that sea sludge such a
dick
stupid sea slug and finally mr. sharks
going to be around still mad as bees
well no sense of worrying about it I
suppose just have to see what happens
tomorrow
woman as I lay in bed I'm awake I'm
awake I didn't know I hit my head on the
other thing I'm awake I got this I got I
got this let's try this shizzle again
wetsuit integrity check fan regulators
correct leaves attached yeah okay we're
good a flask of hot coffee in the ocean
check think I'll take a belt of that now
just screw the top and meanwhile every
single coffee thing is floating right
into the ocean oh shit they're guns
should have thought that one through
better
fantastic well I don't need caffeine to
be on my a-game
let's explore been an IP here under this
rock
hey alright fingers crossed lift the
rock up gently my bow seriously check my
pal you know I really don't feel like
taking this from a freaking slug yeah oh
man oh that does it
drop the rock and crush the little
bastard no I'm gonna ask what zip what's
up with him and sucking on balls duck oh
oh my word you know nobody has ever
bothered to ask me that before I'd go
out and about you know trying to help
people by telling them the secret of the
balls never a word of thanks of course
at first I was routed to earnestly plead
with passive passers-by to listen to the
his sodic tale I had to tell they were
just drift past they'll be had time for
the words of a slug
fantastic good to know that the slug
finally calm down and says I'm about on
an attempt to appeal them I started to
use a simple of vocabulary
I thought maybe my words were simply too
manifold for the others to understand
but still the goddess check refused to
smile upon the endeavors of a simple sea
slug but my heart my heart was broken
and once where it was a cornucopia of
love to my fellow creatures now it was a
million shattered relic with barely the
strength to pin her back yet somewhere
in my slugs soul I cannot hope that one
day someone will care alas my respect
for my peers intelligence had all but
gone so I reverted to a simple shocked
annex the language of the clique beta
and the gutter press I reduced my cry to
a simple appeal to sack my mouth even
this had no effect but I never stopped
to tell the people of the secret of the
palms has become my only reason there
take get I don't mess it up sorry I'm
not French you guys and now you have
come finally somebody wants to know of
the balls
settle down my friend it's like this
yeah I stopped caring about this six
minutes ago five new weights please I've
carried this burden for over a week now
well
the balls are balls of sexual desire in
balls form the more you collect the more
sexuality you have balls make it easier
for you to woo the women they find a man
the multitude of balls it resistible how
the heck does that the hell should I
know I just work here
hey I know uh let's just check out the
wreck
meh let's see about getting in here this
time there's this door but it seems to
be wedged into some how can you reject
it's bone it's Bratz
whoa did that understand you baka I uh
well I hardly know where to start I
meant about me telling you got to come
back you imbecile I get to have to come
back up you've got a lot of dance you
got balls look I'm really sorry about
that but uh it was purely in
self-defense I mean what do I do a shark
knows I was afraid you were gonna eat oh
well then how can you blame me
I'm really sorry I've cooped you on your
student I hope it didn't hurt it looks
okay now I mean it's just kind of soft
and pleasant huh you think my skin looks
okay oh sure it looks fine to me I mean
I meant fine is it a cutie pie oh sure
yeah okay whatever but I oh me oh my
it's been four years
well you're saying you're telling me
from you I want you to take me there be
there tomorrow at 7:00 nobody's sorry
oh my god yes
yeah you came out of date tomorrow why I
was dazed you went to buy multiple rows
of razor-sharp teeth and nom you like a
seal whoa
and that's why I was only joking as if I
be
that's settled then
you prankster youth is there and
tomorrow
I probably should pick my answers a bit
more carefully anyway that was the nice
prospect to look forward to tomorrow and
I'd better go in update marina on my
progress
yo marina I'm back
you're back and empty-handed oh my god I
think I'm going to hurl no no no it's
okay I have a solid lead this time I met
a great white shark and it talks just
like you said and tomorrow I take it on
a date what the literal fuck are you
talking about you shit stain oh I'm I'm
going on a date with it and it's going
to tell me what's up and honestly this
may sound a little stupid but apparently
it used to be human you really you
really are a piece of work you know that
all I wanted was you to bring me a
talking fish I didn't ask you to strike
up a relationship with one what's wrong
with you it's like you either
bring me back nothing at all or you do
something resetted ly retarded like my
half inbred cousin it's disgusting
what well now now look here marina I
think I deserve a bit more credit I'm
getting to the bottom of this whole fish
deal like you wanted and I'm taking all
the risk to do it
just whatever man
this means another day of boat hire
that's going to finish off the budget I
had for this whole trip you had better
make sure you don't mess this up
tomorrow is your last chance if you goof
it again forget it ever getting paid for
this gig we're getting sassy bitch
cheaters have loved once my balls you
got balls yeah you got balls
Oh does that happen every time I
mentioned the word balls huh guess not
anyway I'm better at stuff to find out
if we're in a tire with a wetsuit is
feasible my god do I need money
what kind of date doesn't need money
it's retarded I sure hope they accept my
Discover card because I just got shut up
that night I tossed it I turned I racked
my brain for what you should bring for
what you should bring on a date with the
shark I mean I can't go out without some
kind of a date gift right
what should I breathe I like the
dripping ham but I'm afraid that the
dripping ham would not be a good idea so
uh nice posy of flowers that's perfect
all right no girl can resist flowers
actually funnies the story about that my
wife hates flowers she's allergic to it
so yeah so what if that girl is a great
pickles shot I wonder what sheep
what kind struck snapdragons tulips pens
ooh nah better not pansies I need
flowers with some balls you got balls
it does happen every time I say balls
balls balls balls balls balls balls oh
maybe not what I do it on purpose
apparently you know you can't just say
balls every time well better get some
sleep need to get up early to enjoying
some flowers out of the bucket in front
of the 7-eleven while the clerk's too
sleepy to notice bubbles everybody to
the bubbles checkpoint
let's see half a neuticle mile from the
wreck your nautical sorry everyone my
wife is actually standing right here and
you get your zebra print off of me I'm
sorry I love you okay if only I knew
what the fuck could nautical mile was
and I can't even I don't even know what
that is okay but somehow I reckon this
has to be the place well I'm seeing some
messed up junk in my time and I don't
mean my penis but this pretty well takes
the shark titties bleep ha ha ha
oh she's looking at me on that way to
get all got in the back I think this is
the point of the evening where I'm
supposed to say something charming and
my mouse is all I hold on my mouth I
think I like pulled it out of the
keyboard there we go okay come on to
this how about we skip dinner and just
have a quickie in the toilet yeah what
sort of NOLA Skippy do you think mean
and maybe if this date goes of world
considering you don't have any limbs I
could assume you'll be pull pulling with
your razor shop John oh my god
what the hell is that his arm Witter
he's a blobfish right maybe senpai is
another he's just pretty naturally
ghastly I don't know about that but he
is one ugly fucker there is actual fish
like that good evening madam good
evening can I show you to your rock
thank you would you care to see the why
would you Oh
this really isn't my strong suit how
much something that is like delicious
Thunderbird that sounds delicious
Thunderman five generations of winos
can't be wrong
hi I'm very impaired they're gonna say
pretty sure that this one is one mother
used to is the one month mother of the
ritalin premier it can't even finish my
seventies one mother used to drink a
bottle of Thunderbird please yes we're
still required to be served in a paper
bag paper bag with a new sleeping bag
and three legs dog on the side oh yes
all of the trimming your food did you
order
oh yes Thunderbird uh we have a longest
food mother used to put it on my Golden
Grahams and then it would drift off to
sleep a couple things yeah maybe not as
much of the judgment
I wonder did you yeah sure did
I got you these flowers
Oh
maybe I should have used some kind of
aquatic plant you tried
you got balls okay some hi let's get
down to business to defeat the hood
never gonna catch my breath thing about
the nose who knew me but I really wish
that I knew how to swim be a man
oh sorry no you wouldn't know my fish
talk down here is that not so oh yes I
guess I did
oh thanks well it's a one big big secret
but something tells me I can trust you
with it I used to be human and wait wait
wait wait we didn't get these orders
what we're losing
sefa it consists of merely the chef
manages to Mowgli's may I present the
dish of the day
I'm Matt oh hey you again
haha small world ain't it is there
anything else I can eat no if you don't
want it I'll have it
I'm famished oh my god yeah that's
that's fine critic talk about me like
I'm not here
I see how these well I'm a person too I
deserve respect I have a name you know
it's tasty scratch right down the throat
just like this what did it taste like a
bite like a new Haku this wall
sorry I couldn't shut up shut up
oh yeah I know I used to be a human girl
in fact I was a fish scientist a
graduate of the university of fish study
oh no shit
my boss is one of those too she's the
one who sent me down here to work out
what was going on
Oh what she's right was today a big unit
very crappy attitude oh yes she sounds
very typical
oh the fish science girls have big
hooters you won't get anywhere in a fish
tides you jump oh there is this one girl
well lay down you couldn't feel sorry
for a spirit level anyway please after I
graduated I became convinced that human
pet fish today we're more closely linked
than we thought
I got a drop aboard the research vessel
called the golden pin an aboard that
ship I started my last work the potion
that could turn humans into fish and
fish into humans
I bet you never heard of anything like
that before you had fallen it was a
highly volatile and consecrated mixture
but it wasn't quite perfected but then
disaster disaster disaster the : Bhim
Singh why what did what happened I don't
know didn't see us what the captain just
didn't like you very much but I was
trapped aboard the water was rising I
thought it would be dead but my
submission tape was breached I got such
a high concentrated formula I was
turning to the fish I'm most likely
close to match my DNA great white shark
when the formula got into the ocean
there was weaker but still a more simple
fish brains are just part of the human
ones so now they can all yeah that makes
sense
since that day I've been working to
recreate more formula it's been really
hard just of having fins and jump but I
didn't think it's ready you have to come
you can help turn me back into a real
girl me please help me senpai I was a
hot babe don't make it totally worth
your while you got it come on let's
ditch the pill and get back to the
golden fin I'll race you you got it
there's so much wrong with that chick
poor baby back to the corner with it
hey you guys I'm sorry I don't if you
guys enjoyed that I will do more I had
fun doing this absolutely but I'm
running out of time and if I don't it's
just gonna go click so as always you
guys have fun don't do anything dumb
don't do anything stupid I'll see you
guys in the next shark dating simulator
bye bye and have a friendly tools
