 
Secrets or Surrender

Mary Tribbey

Copyright 2012 Mary Tribbey

Smashwords Edition

**ISBN** : 9781301513802

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

Thank you for downloading this free ebook. You are welcome to share it with your friends. Although this is a free book, it remains the copyrighted property of the author, and may not be reproduced, copied, and distributed for commercial or non-commercial purposes. If you enjoyed this book, please encourage your friends to download their own copy at Smashwords.com, where they can also discover other works by this author. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

About the Author

Author's Notes

#

# Secrets or Surrender

## Chapter 1

Joan sank deeper into the soft leather cushions of the small corner booth in the plush dining room of Adam's Rib Restaurant and sighed. Although it was her favorite restaurant and was located less than five miles from the small apartment she had recently moved into, she rarely ate there. The food and service were excellent, but, because of their high prices, she only went there when she was celebrating something special. Tonight was no exception.

The biggest difference between tonight and other celebrations was Suzy's absence. Normally Suzy, her roommate of the last two years, would have joined her to make it a festive occasion; but, two months ago, Suzy had married Larry and moved to Tucson. For years, Suzy had been her closest and her only real friend. Joan's first thought, after Mr. Johnson called her into his office that morning and told her he was promoting her to office manager, was to call Suzy. Suzy was thrilled to hear her news, but Suzy wasn't around to help her celebrate.

Joan sighed when she realized she couldn't think of anyone else she wanted to invite to share the celebration with her. At Susie's urging, she had promised, for old times' sake, to treat herself to a meal at Adam's Rib. Thinking about being alone and trying to celebrate her recent promotion to office manager at the auto parts supply house where she had worked for nearly 8 months, she felt a wave of sadness wash over her.

A feeling of warmth and relaxation engulfed her, as she finished the last sip of wine on the small table. The efficient waiter had already cleared off the dishes that a few minutes before had held a succulent prime rib dinner. Joan pulled out a small notebook from her purse and dug down to the bottom compartment to retrieve a pen. Setting the glass off to the side of the table, she opened the book and scanned the notes she had written earlier that day.

As a part-time freelance writer and a lifelong people watcher, Joan had often filled in time after a good meal, or even after a mediocre one, with jotting down descriptions of people she observed. It helped her flesh out stories she wrote, and it made her feel less self-conscious about dining alone in a restaurant. With a shake of her head, she forced her attention back to the notebook. Joan quickly read the notes she had jotted down about her next travel article on the bike paths along the Pacific Coast.

She turned to a fresh page, because she just didn't feel like working on the travel article tonight. Over the last two years, she had had several articles published in some magazines. But getting a series of travel articles published in Sunset magazine was her biggest success to date. Joan amended, with a rueful smile; they were the most successful things written by George Adkinson. George Adkinson was the pen name she used on all her work. Joan remembered the thrill she felt when the acceptance check from Sunset Magazine had arrived for George. She had rushed out to buy the magazine as soon as it reached the newsstand. There it was "Favorite Weekend Vacation Spots in Santa Barbara" by George Adkinson.

Seeing his name in print, Joan felt a stab of regret that her real name was not on it, but she knew that using a pseudonym was the best way she could keep her past a secret. Keeping everyone from learning her true identity was nearly an obsession with her. The thought of having to pull up her tenuous roots and start all over again in a new place depressed her.

She forced her attention back to the present. Since the pay at the store where she worked was still low, Joan was thankful for the extra money the articles brought in, no matter whose name was printed on them. Shaking herself mentally, she glanced around the room at the people seated at the tables in the cozy dining room. As her gaze drifted past the plush surroundings, she subconsciously noticed the tall narrow leafed ficus plants scattered around the room. They blended in with the dark wood paneling and the cream colored leather upholstery to create an impression of elegant opulence.

In one corner a stylishly dressed middle-aged woman sat chatting with a distinguished looking gentleman. She smiled as her gaze lingered on the pair. It was reassuring to see a couple looking so contented. It seemed like in Hollywood the only marriage news covered locally was a constant parade of movie and television stars who were feuding or splitting up.

Joan noticed a group of five men seated around a large table near the center of the room. They were all impressive looking men. Three of them were black; the other two were white. It wasn't their coloring or their clothes that caught her attention. It was their size. They were by far the largest men she'd ever seen together in one group. They were all easily 6 feet tall and very husky, although none of them looked fat.

They all appeared to be in their mid-twenties and in good physical condition. Their shoulders, arms, and necks were very broad and muscular, but they didn't appear to be the bulging-muscled bodybuilder types that hung out at the beaches around Venice. That overdeveloped muscle-bound type looked grotesque to her. None of these men looked like that. Except for the smallest, none of them would be called handsome, but all were clean and neat and nice looking in their own ways. They were dressed casually: some in sweaters and others in sports jackets. Joan watched them as they talked, laughed, and ate together.

One of the men was considerably smaller than the others, but no one would have ever dared to call him little. He was almost 6 feet tall, possibly even taller. His shoulders and arms were well-developed, but not as bulky as the others. Joan quickly began jotting down notes about them. She carefully observed each one and then wrote a quick sketch of them individually. Then she began describing the way they were interacting. Joan felt a stab of envy as she watched the easy way they laughed and talked together. It made her acutely aware of her solitary existence. "How wonderful it would be to be part of a group like that," Joan thought wistfully. Joan shook herself out of her reverie and drank the last of her coffee. She quickly reread her notes, folded her napkin, and began getting ready to leave. She pulled a $20 bill out of her wallet and laid it on the tray with her tab.

As she waited for the waiter to pick up the money, her attention kept returning to the men at the other table. The smallest one who sat diagonally across from her glanced up. As she watched him, she decided he had a ruggedly handsome face. His dark brown hair was combed back away from his forehead and framed the strong features of his face. When his dark eyes momentarily met hers, Joan glanced down self-consciously. When she looked up again, his attention had returned to his companions. Joan snuck another look in his direction. Somehow his eyes haunted her, and he looked familiar, but she pushed the thought out of her mind.

Joan had just put on her jacket, when a commotion at the other table attracted her attention. The laughing had stopped, and the men were all staring at their smaller companion. He was coughing and appeared to be choking. As she watched, he stood and began gasping for breath and clutching his throat. Joan took it all in with one horrified glance. She watched as his face changed from flushed red to white. The other men just stared helplessly as he sank back into his chair.

Joan sprang out of her chair, nearly upsetting it in her haste. Without thinking, she rushed across to where he sat. By the time he had crumpled into his chair, Joan was by his side.

"Are you choking?" she asked.

He couldn't speak, but he kept pointing at his throat. As she watched, he slumped down, and appeared to lose consciousness. His body went limp, and his breathing stopped.

Joan knew she had only minutes to save him from death or permanent brain damage. It was obvious, like a terrible recurring nightmare from her childhood, that he had choked on something and it had lodged in his throat. Without waiting, she ordered the two men on either side of him to lift him up. As soon as they hoisted him to his feet, she stood behind him and wrapped her arms around his middle and put her clasped hands at the point just below his rib cage. Clutching her hands together in front of him, she made a fist and quickly jerked her hands up, forcing her fists into his diaphragm. Nothing! Joan summoned all her strength and jabbed her clenched hands into his diaphragm again. Still nothing happened! One more time, she repeated the jerking motion. A soft popping sound alerted her that the food had become dislodged.

"Lower him down into the chair," she ordered. Quickly she opened his mouth and pulled out the piece of meat he had choked on, and tossed it onto the table. She put her face down close to his mouth. There was no breath coming out. His windpipe had been obstructed so long; it had caused his breathing to stop. Joan touched the pulse point at his throat. She couldn't feel anything. She lowered her ear down to his chest and listened, but she didn't hear any heartbeats. Joan hurried into action again.

"Call an ambulance!" she yelled. "Now lay him down on the floor on his back." She knelt down, tilted his chin back, pinched his nostrils together, and began giving mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. Over and over again, she gulped in air and forced it from her lungs into his mouth, watching his chest rising and falling with each breath.

"Can you help me?" she asked the white man who had lowered him to the floor.

"What do you need?" he asked.

"Kneel down across from me," she ordered. He immediately knelt down.

"Put your hands together like this," she demonstrated. She put her hands on the prone man's chest just below his rib cage. "Watch this," she ordered. She pushed three times, forcing the heel of her hand about 2 inches into his chest. "When I say go, push three times into his chest like I did," Joan bent over, pinched the victim's nostrils shut, and started breathing into him. When she lifted her mouth to take another breath, she said, "Go, now." She continued breathing for him and taking new breaths as the man did the chest compressions.

After a few minutes, she stopped and put her ear against his chest. She said, "Thank God, it's beating. You can stop pressing his chest." She continued forcing air into his mouth. It seemed like she'd been working on him for hours, but it was only about 10 minutes total.

By the time the paramedics arrived, the man's skin color had nearly returned to normal, and he had begun to breathe on his own. One time, his eyelids had flickered open briefly, and Joan noticed how dark and beautiful they looked before they closed again. There were small flecks of gold floating in their brown depths.

The paramedics pushed their way through the people who had gathered around. They quickly took over and put an oxygen mask on his face. They called to the hospital and began an IV. They lifted the man up and put him on a gurney. The man began moving. He was confused and tried to pull off the oxygen mask. He started struggling and tried to get up. The man who had helped Joan do the chest compressions said, "Stop, Dave. You've had an accident. Let them help you." He looked at his friend and settled down. The paramedics insisted he should go to the hospital to be checked out.

"Don't you understand? You were clinically dead before we got here! If it weren't for this young lady, you'd be dead now or have massive brain damage. You need to be checked at the hospital to make sure everything is all right," the first paramedic explained.

"You are really lucky she was here and knew what to do or you probably wouldn't have made it," the other paramedic said as he strapped him to the gurney.

As he lay on the stretcher, he turned and looked at her. When he reached out his hand towards her, she took his hand and squeezed it. He pulled her closer, and his lips formed a word. She couldn't hear what he murmured.

"What?" she asked. "I can't hear you."

When his mouth moved again, she leaned closer to hear him better. He raised his head off the stretcher and planted a soft kiss against her lips. She felt suddenly very timid and pulled away. Then the paramedics quickly pushed their way through the crowd and loaded him into the ambulance.

Joan sank down into the closest chair. The stocky white man, who had been helping with the chest compressions, quickly took charge. He told his three companions to follow the ambulance.

"I'll meet you there in a few minutes after I take care of things here," he added,

He took out several bills and threw them on the table. When he looked around, he noticed Joan's face was pale, and her lower lip began to tremble.

"Are you all right?" he asked quickly.

"No, I've got to get out of here," she mumbled as a crowd of people began pressing around her. He took her arm, grabbed her purse off the table, pushed through the curious bystanders, and led her outside. Once there, the trembling started. She stumbled and closed her eyes as her surroundings begin to tilt. Suddenly a strong arm went around her and held her steady while the dizziness passed. She shivered and buried her face against the warm strength of his chest and began to cry. He held her gently while she sobbed.

A group of curious people were beginning to gather around them. Sensing her growing nervousness, he quickly led her away from the crowd towards his car in the dimly lit parking lot. Once around the corner of the building, he paused.

"It's all right. He's going to be fine, thanks to you," he soothed. "Don't cry"

"I can't help it," she stammered. "It isn't him," she sobbed.

"What is it?" he asked.

"It's a long story." she mumbled.

"I've got the time, if you feel like talking," he added softly. "Are you feeling better? Are you all right now?"

Joan shook her head. "I don't know," she managed to say.

His arms stayed loosely around her shoulders. "You were wonderful in there. I don't know what we would have done. None of us knew what to do. How did you know? Are you a nurse or something?" he asked.

Joan shook her head and tried to pull away. "No, but I've seen it before," she added, tears still running down her cheeks.

"Are you going to be all right now?" he asked.

"I feel so stupid," she moaned. "Look, I've drenched your shirt and sweater. Are you in the habit of lending your shoulder to weeping women?"

"No, but you can use it any time. You saved my best friend's life. How did you know what to do?" he asked again.

A look of pain flashed across her face as she began speaking. "When I was about six years old, my father and I were in a café. He swallowed something wrong and began choking. I didn't understand what was happening. No one knew what to do. By the time help arrived, it was too late. He was already dead," she gulped. "I vowed I'd never stand by and let that happen again. As soon as I was old enough to enroll in CPR classes, I did. It's come in handy before. I don't ever want anyone to die needlessly again," she vowed softly.

He held her, comforting her with the strength of his arms. He gently stroked her hair until she gathered herself together again.

"What a terrible thing to have had happen to someone so young," he exclaimed. "What an awful experience for you and your mother."

"My mother died just after I was born. My dad was all the family I had," she added quietly.

That's even worse," he said. He hugged her close again and held her gently for a few seconds

"I think I'm all right now," she whispered softly.

"I think you're more than just all right. I think what you did in there was super!" He added. His arm tightened around her shoulder briefly, and then he slowly released her.

"My car is right here. Get inside. We need to get to the hospital."

Joan pulled away, "No!" she exclaimed. "I'm not going anywhere but home. I have my own car over there."

"Please come to the hospital with me, or follow me there. I know Dave will want to talk to you, to thank you for what you did for him," he urged.

"No!" she explained. "No hospitals. I hate everything about them. Because of...of past things, I just can't go there. I'm not able to force myself to go into one, not even to visit a friend. I know I must sound like a terrible coward, but I just can't face going there."

"Okay, I don't really understand, but the last thing I want to do is upset you again, but I know Dave is going to want to thank you personally," he said.

"Please just drop it. I didn't do it for thanks or rewards. It was for my dad and me. I'm sure that sounds weird, but that's the way I feel," Joan added softly.

"What's your name?" he asked. "Where do you live??"

"I...I...uh...I don't... I'm sorry, but I can't tell you that. I don't even know who you are," she stammered.

"I'm sorry! You probably think I'm some kind of weirdo. My name is Lyle Gordon. Do you recognize my name?" he inquired.

"No. Should I?" she asked.

Lyle answered, "I guess not, but I play center on the Los Angeles Rams football team, and a lot of people recognize my name. Do you know who you just saved from dying?" Lyle asked.

Joan shook her head. "Someone you called Dave. That's all I know; but I would've done it for anyone. It really didn't matter to me who he was."

"Well, it really mattered to a lot of people, sweet lady. You just saved the life of David Allen, probably the greatest quarterback the Los Angeles Rams ever had. He's by far the most famous football player in the United States right now, and the nicest guy I've ever known. If he had died tonight, I don't know what I would've done. He's my best friend. He was Best Man at my wedding and is Godfather to my sons. My kids would never have gotten over it. They both adore Dave. You have to let me do something for you," he pleaded.

"My name is Joan, Joan Marshall, but I don't need anything. I don't want any fuss or anything. Please, just drop it," she stammered.

"I can't just forget what you did for Dave and me. Well, Joan, if you won't go to see Dave in the hospital, I have an idea. Please let me give you tickets to next Sunday's game. My wife Cindy always comes to the home games. I know she'll want to meet you. If nothing else, you could see what a great player Dave is. Please come! It would really mean a lot to me. You did so much for me today, for my family, for Dave, and for all of his friends." As he dug in his wallet, he asked, "Do you have a husband or boyfriend?" he asked.

"Why are you asking that?" Joan asked suspiciously.

"Sorry. Nothing sinister intended," he chuckled. "I just thought if you had a boyfriend or husband, I'd give you two tickets. Don't worry. I am a very happily married man. I'm not trying to pick you up."

"I'm sorry. You must think I'm a suspicious person, but with no boyfriend, no husband, being single, and living alone, it makes me extra cautious. I'm also a very private person. I'm sorry I reacted so suspiciously," she added quietly.

"That's okay. I understand completely. I'd want my wife Cindy to be just as cautious as you when it came to giving information to a stranger. There are a lot of crazy people running around loose. Are you sure you won't come to the hospital with me? I know Dave is going to want to see you," he informed her as he handed her the ticket.

"I'm sorry. I can't," she answered quickly. "All I want to do is go home and lie down."

"Let me walk you to your car. Which one is it?" he asked.

"It's that old blue VW over there," she indicated, pointing to a corner of the parking lot. He kept his hand on her arm as he guided her across the uneven ground to her car. She unlocked the door. Before she got in, he gave her another hug and a kiss on the cheek. When she was inside, he pushed down the door lock button.

"Promise me you'll use your ticket. This $20 is to pay for your transportation and some food while you are at the game. It would mean a lot to Dave and me if you come to the game. Please, Joan, promise me you'll come on Sunday," he pleaded.

"I can't take this money," she argued. "I didn't do this for money or rewards."

"The money isn't important, but if you still feel that way, you can return it to my wife at the game. She'll be there, and she would love to make a new friend. She's been so lonesome since we moved away from her family in Georgia. Please, promise you'll come," Lyle added.

"Well, I've never been to a professional football game. I guess it might be interesting. Okay, I'll be there. Now can I go home?" she asked with a low laugh.

"Yes, you may, Joan, now that you've promised," he added with a chuckle.

"Goodnight. Thanks again for the shoulder to cry on," she added.

"Anytime," he said as she pulled away, "Drive carefully. See you on Sunday."

Joan waved, and pulled away from him and the parking place, heading for the exit. He watched her drive to the exit. While she sat there waiting for a break in traffic, he pulled out a pen and jotted down her car's license plate number. "Just in case you don't show up," he muttered to himself. "We may need to find you some day." He watched as her car turned north and moved out of sight. He went back into the restaurant to gather up Dave's jacket. As he was starting to leave, the waiter asked if the woman who helped was still around.

"No, she left a few minutes ago. Why do you ask?" he queried.

"After all the excitement, I found a notebook under the table where she'd been sitting. I remember she'd been writing in it earlier; so I'm sure it belongs to her. I just wanted to return it," he explained.

"Does she come here often?" Lyle asked.

"I've never seen her here before," he answered.

"I'll be seeing her on Sunday. I can give it to her then," Lyle explained. He took the notebook, picked up Dave's jacket, and left the restaurant.

Lyle walked straight up to the reception desk at the hospital emergency room entrance. He started to ask about Dave when he spotted Henry Washington standing about halfway down the hallway talking to a cute black nurse. He quickly strode over to join them.

"Henry, have you heard anything about Dave? Is he all right?" Lyle asked.

"They haven't told us anything yet. They took him into the main examining room as soon as the ambulance arrived. He was talking and seemed like he wanted out of here. I guess that's a good sign," he added, flashing a smile at the nurse.

"When can we find out what his condition is?" Lyle asked the nurse.

"I don't know. I'll go see if I can get some information for you. I'll be right back," she called over her shoulder. Henry watched her walk away and said quietly, "What a dreamy girl. I think she likes me. I'm going to get her phone number before I leave here tonight," Henry added. As she disappeared into the examining room, Jordan and Alonso came strolling up with cups of steaming hot coffee in their hands. Jordan offered a cup to Lyle, but he waved it aside.

"I don't usually like hospitals, but they sure do have some cute nurses here," Henry leered as he watched another nurse disappear down the long hallway. "I wouldn't mind some TLC from that one."

"Henry, you're hopeless. Are women all you think about?" Alonso asked.

"No, I think about food, too. Food and women, that's two things I can't seem to get enough of," he chuckled.

"It looks like Lyle did a little more than just think about women. What's Cindy going to say about that lipstick on your shirt collar?" Jordan asked, pointing at Lyle's right shoulder.

"I thought Henry was a fast worker, but it looks like Lyle found more action than Henry tonight." Alonso added.

"Hey, man. You're ruining my reputation as number one flirt, and you're a happily married man," Henry cautioned.

"I wonder what Dave will say when he finds out, while he was out of commission, Lyle made a successful pass!" Henry quipped.

"All right, you guys! That's enough kidding! Someone had to take care of things at the restaurant. If you weren't such a bunch of clowns, I'd tell you the whole story, but I will personally knock the block off anyone who says anything bad about the lady who saved Dave's life. She's a special woman. If you ever tease her about this, I swear you'll regret it," Lyle snarled.

"Calm down. We didn't mean anything by it. We were just kidding around. Don't get so sore," Henry apologized.

"I'm sorry. This business about Dave really got to me. If she hadn't been there, he'd be dead. That thought scares the hell out of me. What if she hadn't been there..." Lyle stammered.

"We all know how you feel. I never felt so stupid or helpless in my life. She was terrific! I wish I'd thought to thank her, but I was so shocked, I didn't think about anything but getting Dave to the hospital," Jordan admitted.

"You know how we all feel about Dave. We were only blowing off steam to break the tension. My nerves are shot. I never realized how quickly something like this could happen! God bless her! I don't understand how anyone could know how to react as quickly or as calmly she did. She sure took charge. She saved his life!" Henry said.

"I tried to get her to come to the hospital, but she was pretty shook up about it, and she said she couldn't face coming here. I know Dave is going to want to thank her, but I couldn't talk her into coming." Lyle admitted.

"I'd like to thank her, too," Alonso added. "Dave's been a real friend to me. He's such a great guy."

"Well, maybe you guys will get a chance to thank her, but not tonight," Lyle hinted.

"When?" Henry asked.

"That's all I'm going to tell you until I know anything more definite. What's taking them so long in there? Do you suppose something's gone wrong?" Lyle asked.

"Calm down, Lyle. We've only been here a few minutes. Things take time in an emergency room! You've had knee surgery. You know how long everything takes when it comes to doctors and hospitals," Jordan teased.

"Yeah, they figure the longer it takes, the more they can charge," Henry quipped.

"Dave will be upset that she isn't here." Alonso fretted.

"I know, but I'll take care of Dave," Lyle said.

## Chapter 2

They turned at the sound of the treatment door opening. With a sigh of relief, they saw Dave walking out under his own power. They quickly surrounded him.

"Are you all right?" Lyle asked quickly.

"The doctor says I'm healthy as an ox, and that it's a miracle, considering I was clinically dead a few minutes ago! I can't remember much of what happened, but the paramedics and emergency room attendants filled me in on what they knew. They told me a woman saved my life," Dave added quietly.

"That's right," Henry interrupted. "She sure did! She took over and brought you back. You looked awful! Your lips were blue, and you were even whiter than usual. We were too shocked to do anything."

"I vaguely remember seeing a woman with blue-green eyes. Was she the one?" Dave asked.

"You should know. You gave her a kiss before they took you out to the ambulance. She breathed life back into you. We thought you were dead. You had started to turn blue," Alonso explained.

"I didn't notice her eyes, but she was very pretty, about 5 feet seven, light brown hair, cute figure. Everything happened so fast that Henry didn't even have enough time to ask her out. You know that had to be fast!" Jordan joked. The others looked at Lyle and shrugged their shoulders.

"She does have blue-green eyes, and she is very pretty, and she is also incredibly shy," Lyle added.

"Is she here?" David asked, looking around.

"No." Lyle answered. "I tried to get her to come here, but she refused."

"Who is she? How can I find her? I can't just let her save my life, and not even thank her!" Dave fussed.

"I'll fill you in on what I know in the car. It's been quite an evening, and I think we'd better get you home to rest," Lyle answered glancing around at the others.

"That sounds like a good idea," Alonso added.

"I think I'll hang around here for a few minutes. That cute little nurse gets off work soon," Henry announced with a smile.

"I'll drive you back to your car, or do you just want me to drive you home? We can get your car tomorrow before practice, if you don't feel up to driving," Lyle offered."Take me back to my car. They checked me over and said I am fine, but I do feel a little shaky. Nervous reaction, I guess, since I've never been dead before," Dave joked. After signing some forms, Dave and Lyle walked outside. Once in the car, they both rode in silence for a few minutes.

Lyle glanced over at Dave. "Are you really okay?" he asked.

"Yes, but I can't stop thinking about this woman and how much I owe her," Dave admitted.

"She doesn't want any thanks or anything else. She's very shy and said saving a life was reward enough for her. From what she said, I don't think you're the first person she's saved." Lyle added.

"Tell me everything you know about her," Dave ordered.

"I don't know that much. I did talk to her for a while after the ambulance left. She's apparently had a bad experience with hospitals before and refused to come to the hospital with me. She wouldn't tell me where she lived or give me her phone number, but I did get her name."

"Well, what's her name?" Dave asked impatiently.

"It's Joan, Joan Marshal," Lyle added.

"How can I find her and thank her? Marshal is a common last name. There are probably hundreds in the Los Angeles phonebook. I'll find her if I have to call all of them," Dave announced with quiet determination.

"Hold your horses; I may be able to save you the trouble. I was going to wait to tell you until you've had a chance to rest, but she promised me she'd come to the game on Sunday. I gave her a ticket for the extra seat in the box with Cindy. If she comes, Cindy will try to talk her into staying to meet us later after the game. She was very reluctant to even accept the ticket, but she finally did promise to come. I think she will keep her word. I don't think she's the kind of person who would break a promise, and she finally did promise to come. She didn't have any idea who you were, even after I told her your name. Apparently, she doesn't follow football at all. She explained she's never been to a professional football game. If she does show up, maybe we can figure out something special to do for her," Lyle suggested.

"That's a great idea! Thanks for arranging for her to come on Sunday," Dave said eagerly.

"I hope she does show up, for more reasons than just saying thanks. She lost a notebook at the restaurant, and I told the waiter that I would see her on Sunday and would return it to her. I don't know if it is something important, but I want to find a way to get it back to her," Lyle added.

"Let me have it. I'll keep it for her until the game. It may give me some clues about my mystery Lady," Dave ordered.

"I don't know if we should read through her papers," Lyle protested.

"Let me worry about that. You know I'd never do anything to hurt her after she saved my life. Lyle, I'm so curious. I just need to know about her. It's very important to me," Dave insisted.

Lyle drove back into the parking lot at Adam's Rib and parked near Dave's car. First, he handed Dave the jacket that he had retrieved from the restaurant and then he gave Dave the small notebook that Joan had dropped. Dave took both things and quickly climbed into his car. With a wave to Lyle, he started his car. They drove out of the parking lot at the same time, turning in opposite directions to go to their houses. When Dave got home, he unlocked the door and entered the spacious living room. He tossed his jacket over the back of the nearest chair, walked over to the sofa, and sank down into the soft upholstered cushions.

He opened the notebook and started reading through the pages. The book seemed to contain an assortment of lists and short descriptions of places and people. He skimmed a series of notes about the bicycle path along the ocean. He easily recognized the area she'd described. Because his house was built on a cliff overlooking the Pacific Ocean near Malibu, one of the bike trails ran along the western edge of his property. He continued thumbing through the pages.

When Dave came to the last page, he drew in a deep breath. Although there were no names in the notebook, he easily recognized his friends. The descriptions were all short, but very accurate. He re-read one. "A black man, massively built, with arms that look like they were used to picking up cars for a living, dominated one end of the table where the group was sitting. Thick muscles bulged through his tight blue knit shirt, barely concealing the strength hidden beneath the soft material. He looked around the room frequently and openly flirted with a couple of young women at a nearby table. He flashed them a quick smile, raised one eyebrow and winked playfully. As his attention drifted around the room, his smile burst forth, like sunshine after a storm, transforming his features from formidable to friendly." With an amused smile, Dave could see Henry. Her description seemed to capture not just his appearance, but his personality as well.

He continued reading. "The smaller of the five men, a ruggedly handsome man with dark brown eyes, seemed to be the leader of the group Women at other tables frequently glanced at him, but he seemed unaware of their interest, and his concentration never seemed to stray from his companions. Although his eyes constantly swept the room, he was taking in everything he saw, but was still concentrating on his friends. He was obviously their leader: strong, intelligent, alert, well liked and respected. He was someone easy to follow. (I wonder what it would be like to be led by him; it would be so easy to get lost in the warm darkness of his eyes.) His shoulders are broad and well developed, although they don't have the excessive bulk of his companions. It was obvious he was strong enough to handle any problems that came his way. He seemed to ooze quiet confidence without a trace of the arrogance that often hovered over someone as handsome and as poised as he appeared. It was obvious from the way the men reacted to him that he was respected and liked by all who knew him."

He read the description again. It was an odd sensation reading what a stranger had thought about him. If he had been among other people when he read it, he realized he would probably have blushed with pleasure. He was deeply flattered by what she'd written. He hoped when she got to know him, she would feel the same way about him. For some reason, her opinion mattered to him, although he didn't know why.

He had to admit that this mystery woman had captured his essence in her descriptive words. He did have a habit of constantly looking around. He had to do it most of the time, especially on the playing field. As the quarterback, it was a necessity. It carried over into his everyday life. He did concentrate and focus, but his eyes still took in everything around him. He'd never thought much about the way others saw him, but the things she noted about him filled him with pleasure.

He tried to remember the events of the evening, but much of it was a blank. The doctors said that was normal after his experience, but it still bothered him. He wanted to remember everything about her. He tried to call up the memory of the face he'd seen from the stretcher. He vaguely remembered the sweetness of their brief kiss. He touched his lips with his fingers as if to bring back the sensation of her lips touching his. He swore in frustration because he didn't know who she was or where she lived or how to find her. He wanted to see her again now. Thoughts of finding her and thanking her filled his mind. Later that night while lying in bed, fleeting memories of her face drifted in and out of his dreams. Each time she came close and gently kissed him, he tried to put his arms around her to keep her from disappearing, but she always vanished. He awoke feeling strangely lonely and even more determined to locate her. He prayed she would come to the game, but no matter what he would find her if it took the rest of his life.

At practice the next day, the team doctor checked him over and pronounced him fit to play. The coach and all the other players were astonished at the story of Dave's near death. It was unanimously agreed that they all wanted to do something special for this mystery woman. As the week went by, plans for a presentation after the game took shape. She would be made an honorary member of the team and would be thanked by them for her quick thinking. They would invite the press and give her the recognition she deserved for her quick actions.

The success of the plan would all depend on whether Joan showed up at the game and whether Cindy could talk her into coming to the team's locker room. Those were two big 'ifs,' but Dave clung to the hope that she would come. He worked on arranging a special surprise for her. The week dragged by for Dave. As he waited for Sunday, he couldn't remember ever being so anxious for a game to start. He'd arranged for the ushers to keep an eye on Cindy and to get word to him if another woman joined Cindy in the reserved seating area. If she showed up, he would find a way to meet her. Cindy was a willing co-conspirator. She and Lyle were going to celebrate their fifth wedding anniversary. She suggested going out for a small party after the game at a local jazz club. The others eagerly agreed. By the time Sunday afternoon arrived, everything was ready, but there was one question on everyone's mind: Would she show up?

## Chapter 3

After arriving home, Joan hung up her jacket and dropped exhausted into her chair. The excitement of the evening had taken a heavy toll on her emotionally. She felt wonderful that she been able to save Dave's life, but it brought back all kinds of painful memories from her childhood. She leaned her head back and let the waves of memories wash over her. She closed her eyes, and they paraded before her like phantoms from an old movie. Although Joan had only been six years old when he died, fleeting memories of her father and the love they shared came back. She struggled with the emotions she had felt just after his death and the awful, confusing days when her world had been turned upside down. Since her mother had died when she was born, her dad had been everything to her. She had no other family. She could almost hear him speaking to her, "We're a team, Joan, and we'll always be a team."

Joan cried again for her father and for the terrible years that followed his death. Since she had no other family, Joan became a ward of the court. She was placed in foster care. There had been so many foster homes over the years that most of them blended together. Some of them had not been too bad; but it seemed that every time she started feeling at home, it was time for her to move on to another strange new family. A few had been so terrible that she tried to push their memory from her mind. The last one as a teenager had been the most frightening. In the last one, her foster father had made sexual advances towards her. She always managed to get away before anything 'really bad' happened, but she couldn't wait until she was 18 and old enough to get away from all of the foster homes. In most of the places, she had not been abused. They had mostly been basically good people, but she never felt like she belonged anywhere or to anyone. Her teachers and school mates described her as a loner. That really wasn't what she wanted, but it hurt so much to constantly be uprooted from one place to another. It was too emotionally painful to leave a group of 'friends' and then struggle to make a new set of friends in another unfamiliar place. She eventually stopped trying to make friends at all. Being a loner made leaving easier. The problem was it made her feel even lonelier and out of place.

When Joan was 17, she met Larry Walker. He was 17 also, and he was so much like her that they just naturally seemed drawn to each other. He also felt left out, unwanted, a loner, just like her. Over the months of their senior year, they had started dating. For the first time since her father's death, she felt there was someone who cared about her, who loved her and needed her as much as she needed him. In spite of pressure from her foster parents, they began dating, openly at first, and then by sneaking out when her foster father tried to separate them. It was after one of their dates that her foster father tried to rape her. She managed to get away, but she vowed never to return to that home again.

She went to see Larry, because she had no one else to turn to. When she told Larry what it had almost happened, he convinced her that they should run away and get married. He was 18, almost 19, and she was almost 18.

"We love each other. I'll take care of you. You mean everything in the world to me," he promised as he held her close. It was that night when they first made love. She gave all her love to Larry and agreed to run away with him and get married. The next day Joan drew out all the money she had saved from her after school job and they left for Las Vegas. She had a fake ID that showed her age to be 18.

Larry's old Chevy chugged along all the way to Nevada. They went to one of the wedding chapels on the strip and, with hearts filled with love and hope; they exchanged their promise to love each other forever. The thought of Larry and the first few months of their marriage were too beautiful and too painful to be endured.

Joan sobbed and then began pacing the floor. It had been a real struggle to make ends meet, but they had each other and nothing else mattered. Larry worked in a gas station, and Joan had a job as a waitress at a small truck stop café. They pooled their money together and managed to pay their rent and even had a little left over for an occasional evening at the movies. How tender and gentle Larry had been. Joan smiled as she remembered how he had left little notes for her before he went to work. Sometimes he slipped one into her purse, and she didn't find it until she was at work. Life seemed perfect with Larry's loving presence.

She remembered how Larry had fussed at her for not going to the doctor when she was feeling sick. He kept saying, "We can afford it. Your health is important to me. I've made an appointment for you this afternoon. You'd better show up," he threatened, "or I'll take off work and drive you there myself!"

"All right. You win, Larry. I'll go see the doctor, but it's a waste of money. I probably just have a touch of the flu," she griped.

"I don't care. I can't stand seeing you feeling so tired and sick all the time. I love you," he reminded her, giving her a big hug.

Joan felt like screaming when Dr. Thompson insisted, "Joan, this definitely isn't the flu. I can't be completely sure until the results of the blood test come back, but I'm almost positive that you're pregnant."

When the test results came back, it was true. She was going to have a baby. When Larry got home that night, she wanted to tell him, but she was afraid. "We have barely enough money to make ends meet now, how can we afford a baby?" she fretted. The thought of having Larry's baby thrilled her, but she was scared, too. When she finally told him, Larry grabbed her and swung her around in a big exuberant hug. Then he put her down and started treating her like a fragile china doll. "I love you, Joan, I'm so happy! I feel like going up on the rooftop and shouting the news to everyone that I'm going to be a father!" he crowed.

"But Larry, we can't afford it," Joan cried.

"Don't worry, honey, I'll get a second job. I'll take care of you and the baby. We will work it out together," he reassured her.

They both worked harder, and scrimped and saved for the baby and for the doctor bills. It was a time of hard work and sacrifice, but Joan looked back on it as the happiest time of her life

Joan clearly remembered the day the letter came that changed the course of their lives forever. Larry's draft notice arrived. He was being called up to go into the army. It was a troubled time in America. The nation was split over the Vietnam War, but Larry refused to run off to Canada like many other men were doing.

"I really don't want to go off and leave you, especially now with you being pregnant, but I have to do it," he insisted. "The money the Army pays is more than I can make from these two, crummy jobs I've got here. Besides, while I'm in the army, I can get some training. When I get out, I'll get a good job, and you won't ever have to work anymore. I hate leaving you now, but maybe I'll get assigned somewhere around here, and you can join me there. We'll survive. Don't worry. I'll always take care of you. Do you know how much I love you?" he asked.

Joan understood. There were many things she didn't know or trust, but she knew Larry's love was real and he was all that mattered in her life. Besides, they had no choice. He had to go; she would stay home and take care of the baby, and he would be as proud of her as she was of him.

Within two weeks, he was gone. He did his basic training at Fort Ord, California. She splurged and went out to see him when he finished his basic training. They spent his leave day and night in a small motel near Santa Cruz. It was cheap and not terribly clean, but it seemed like heaven being with Larry again. She was looking pregnant by now. Since the morning sickness had stopped, she felt better than ever, and Larry kept telling her how beautiful she looked. She felt happy that weekend.

She hated going home alone. The day after she got home, Larry called. He told her his orders had been received. He'd been turned down for officer training school. He and his whole unit were being shipped out the next week for Vietnam. He'd been assigned to the communications unit to set up small field radio communication stations. It was an important job, and he was so excited. He loved tinkering with electronic things.

"Just think of it! When I get out, I can do radio and TV repair work. We'll be rolling in money then. Please take care of yourself. I'll write you as soon as I can. I love you," Larry repeated over the phone just before he shipped out.

Joan closed her eyes. She tried to remember exactly how his voice had sounded, but it been too long ago. All she could remember is how empty she felt after hanging up the phone that day.

Every day, after work, Joan rushed home and checked the mail. If there was a letter, the day seemed bright; when there wasn't, she felt tired and lonely. She continued working, even volunteering to work additional shifts, to earn extra money for the baby-to-be. Since there was no one to go home to, Joan worked more and more hours. She took a part-time job in a small convenience store. By the time she got home from working the two jobs, she fell into bed too tired to feel anything.

She remembered being awakened one day from a deep sleep by a loud knock on her door. Groggily she walked over and peeked out. Two tall men in army uniforms stood outside. She brushed the hair back from her face and opened the door, not knowing that her world was about to collapse.

"Mrs. Walker," one man asked. "Are you married to Private Larry Walker?"

"Yes, how can I help you?" she asked.

"May we come in? We need to talk to you." After they walked in, they stood awkwardly by the door. "I don't...," the taller man hesitated as he stammered nervously.

"What's wrong? Is something wrong with Larry?" she demanded

"I'm sorry to tell you this, but he's missing in action. The hill he was defending was captured by the Vietcong. His body has not been found, so he may still be alive. We're still searching for him, but, at this time, we're not hopeful that he will be found alive."

## Chapter 4

Even after all the years, Joan remembered she had felt like she'd been kicked in the stomach by the news. She remembered screaming and sobbing. The men had been very uncomfortable, and soon they had left her alone. After they were gone, Joan sat down, staring at the letter that arrived that day from Larry. "I love you, babe. I can't wait to get home to you," he'd written. Her tears fell unnoticed onto the paper as the letter faded from her view.

After that the days seemed to blur together. She worked longer hours, trying, in vain, to forget the awful emptiness inside her world. She couldn't eat food; it just wouldn't go down. There was too big a lump in her throat. Unless she was totally exhausted, she had trouble sleeping.

To top everything off, there was a paperwork snafu at the Army headquarters and the allotment checks stopped coming. Joan called and called, but she was met by red tape and indifference to her problem. Without the checks, she struggled to make ends meet. Before long, her savings were depleted. She had to work longer hours just to pay her rent and utility bills. She longed to have Larry there to make things better, but that thought just made her feel emptier. As time went by, Joan began to feel more and more tired. She drug herself to work each day.

Late one Saturday night while she was working at the truck stop, she started feeling hot and dizzy. The next thing she remembered, she woke up in a strange white room. The people around her were all dressed in white, and the place smelled like alcohol and the people working on her, to her fevered mind, looked white also. She drifted in and out of awareness as the doctors and nurses battled a high fever that ravaged her body. When she finally came to, she felt smothered in the whiteness. There were tubes leading into her arms, and she heard noises coming from machines that surrounded her bed. She felt terribly weak and confused.

"Welcome back, Mrs. Walker, we've been very worried about you," a nurse crooned.

"Where am I? What happened?" she asked groggily.

"Try to rest, dear. You've been very sick. We were afraid for while that you weren't going to make it, but the fever finally broke yesterday. You are going to be all right," she answered.

"I don't understand. How long have I been here?" she asked.

"Nearly a week Just rest. The doctor will be in later to see you," she murmured.

When Joan awoke later that day, a man that she assumed was a doctor was leaning over her. He checked her blood pressure and temperature and smiled.

"How are you feeling today?" he asked.

"I'm tired, very tired," she mumbled.

"I can understand that. You were in terrible shape when you came in. You haven't been taking very good care of yourself. You were so rundown and malnourished; we were scared you wouldn't make it. With a week of rest, lots of medicine, food, and fluids, you're on your way to recovery" he added.

"My baby? What about my baby?" she asked.

"You'd better get some more rest. We'll talk about it later," he said.

"No, tell me now. What about my baby? Why won't you tell me?" Joan cried.

"Nurse, you'd better give her a sedative. We can't let her get so upset," he ordered.

"Please tell me what's wrong!" June cried struggling against the shot.

"Later, later. Rest now," the doctor said, hurrying out of the room.

In a matter of minutes, the medicine took effect. Joan drifted into a nightmare world that was all white and sterile. She wandered around looking for her baby, for Larry, her father, or for anyone who would help her find her baby. She moaned and cried in her sleep. When she came to, a nurse was there bathing her forehead.

"Please tell me about my baby," Joan begged again.

"The doctor will tell you," she answered rushing off to find him.

By the time he came in, Joan was nearly hysterical. He shook his head as he watched her thrashing and pulling at the IV tubes. "All right, if you stop struggling, I'll tell you."

Joan stopped fighting and looked at him. He averted his eyes and shifted uncomfortably from one foot to another. "You were very sick when you were brought in by the ambulance. Your fever was terribly high. Your resistance was extremely low. We did everything we could, but the baby miscarried. If we'd seen you sooner, when you were stronger, we probably could have saved him. We tried, but it was too late," he admitted slowly.

Joan turned her face away from him; she shut her eyes against the awful whiteness of the place. She realized with terrible guilt and pain that she had let her baby die. Because of her actions, her son was dead. Larry's son was dead! She mourned her loss in silence. For a long time, she lay there unmoving, unable to face herself and what had happened. She didn't cry. She didn't move. She barely responded to her surroundings. She longed to die, but her body was too young and strong, and it would not let her die.

Several days later, Joan walked out of the hospital alone, in debt for the hospital bills that had piled up, and filled with terrible guilt for not having taken better care of Larry's baby. Like a zombie, she returned to her apartment. She forced herself to go on.

During that time, the only thing that saved her sanity was writing. She had always liked writing. Now she wrote until her hands ached. She poured out all the pain and guilt in floods of words. Finally, the pain passed and numbness settled in. She forced herself to go to work; then she came home and survived. She carried a notebook with her all the time. When the pain and guilt returned, she poured it out on paper and began slowly to pick up the pieces of her life.

She realized her old life was over. She knew she could never be happy where she was living. There were too many ghosts and memories of Larry and the baby. After weeks of delay, the Army allotment checks began coming again. With the back pay she finally received, she moved to Austin, Texas, and enrolled in a small business college. She studied hard and did well in her classes. When she graduated from the program, she got a job working in a small business office.

Her life was empty, but, at least, she had a job that paid enough for her to live in a small apartment not too far from the university campus. She took a few classes at night in journalism and writing. Slowly, she began creating a new life for herself. It was in one of the writing classes that she'd met Suzy Morris. Suzy was a very helpful and efficient writing partner, and they became close friends. Two years ago, she met Suzy again; they became roommates, and they had moved to Los Angeles to find better jobs.

The accumulation of memories was too much for Joan to handle. She felt inside her purse for her notebook, but it wasn't there. She grabbed a stack of papers, sat down at her typewriter, and began writing. As the words poured out, she began to calm down. When she felt exhausted, she stripped off her clothes and collapsed on her bed. She slept fitfully, waking at the insistent ringing of the alarm. For a moment, she lay there trying to sort out what had happened. Had it all been a dream? No, she remembered the events of the night before.

She dressed quickly and rushed to work in the auto parts store. While she was taking her lunch break, she reached in her purse for her wallet. Tucked inside the wallet was a ticket for the Los Angeles Rams football game on Sunday. She stared at it as if it was written in a strange language. All day she thought about the game. She debated whether to go or not; but, in the end, she decided she would go. She had promised Lyle she would. Lyle had been so kind and gentle with her. He protected her from the crowds that had swarmed around her like killer bees. She knew she would keep her promise. She shuddered as she remembered how trapped she had felt as the people surrounded her. It brought back too many painful memories, but she had felt safe and secure in Lyle's arms. He was a kind man and could be trusted. She decided she wanted to go and see the game.

## Chapter 5

Like a journalist with a new assignment, Joan spent time in the library during the next couple of evenings doing research on Lyle, Dave, and the Los Angeles Rams team. The newspapers were full of praise of Dave Allen, the reclusive quarterback for the team. He shunned publicity. Joan could completely empathize with his need for privacy. She was obsessed with staying out of the public eye, too.

On Sunday she boarded a city bus in Hollywood near her apartment and joined the crowd heading for the Coliseum. She'd never been to the Coliseum before. The first thing that impressed her was its vastness. It held more than 100,000 people, although there were quite a few empty seats when Joan walked through the tunnel that led to her seat on the 50 yard line. The usher checked her seat location and then escorted her down the steps to a section of seats that was roped off from the general public. He led her to a boxed section that contained eight seats. They were all empty, except for one. A pretty blonde woman wearing a deep blue sweater and beige slacks was already settled into one of the seats. When the usher approached, she looked up with a huge welcoming smile. She stood up and took Joan's hand.

"You must be Joan," she gushed in a deep Southern drawl. "I'm Cindy, Lyle's wife. He told me all about you and how you saved Dave's life. I was praying that you'd show up. Come on over and sit down. I don't know how to tell you how wonderful Lyle and the other players think you are. If I didn't know Lyle so well, I'd be jealous. I've never heard him speak so highly of any woman, except me," she added with an infectious laugh.

Joan sat down on the cushion Cindy put on the seat for her. She immediately liked this talkative, bubbly, warm woman sitting next to her

"I'm sorry. I just babble on and on sometimes. Just tell me to be quiet. Lyle does this all the time," she giggled, "but I usually don't pay any attention to him."

"I don't mind your talking at all. I've never been to a football game before, and I'd appreciate any information you can give me. Is it always so crowded at the games? I've never seen so many people in one place before," Joan commented.

Cindy laughed again. "You haven't seen anything yet. Since Dave's been playing here, this place is nearly always sold out! People still have 20 minutes before the game starts. Most seats will be filled before the kickoff. Would you like something to eat or drink? One advantage of being connected to the team is the concession people treat us like royalty." Cindy waved to one of the concessionaires. He hurried over and gave her two large Cokes. Cindy rewarded him with a big smile, before he walked away and began hawking his drinks in the other sections. Joan took a sip of her drink and a handful of popcorn Cindy offered. All the time, Cindy kept up a running commentary on the players, the stadium, and the game.

Joan's head was swimming with the rush of information. "Whoa!" she ordered. "You lost me now. I never went to any football games before, although I must admit I read up on it in the library this week, so I could try to understand what I was seeing today. But all these names and terms, I'll never remember them all," Joan protested.

"You don't have to learn it all. Just sit back and watch. I'll fill you in on what's happening. It's really a simple game, although the way Lyle and the other guys groan about all the plays they have to learn, you'd never suspect it," Cindy giggled. By the time the game started, Joan's nerves had settled down. She really liked Cindy and found herself laughing and having a good time.

"I really like you, Joan. I hope you come and visit Lyle and me. I'd sure like to make some female friends here. Lyle and I are celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary tonight with a small group of friends who are going out for a drink after the game. I got a babysitter and everything," Cindy bubbled. "I usually take the boys with me when I go out, but Lyle insisted we needed some special alone time for ourselves. He's such a sweetheart! The other teams would never agree with that description. I don't know how anybody could be afraid of Lyle. He's as sweet and gentle as a little puppy dog, but not on the field. When he's playing, he's all business. I can't believe we've been married five years already. Joan, will you join us this evening? I don't know many of the other players and their dates. We would really love to have you there. Please say you'll join us. It won't last too late, because I don't like to leave the boys too long with a sitter. How about it? I know Lyle would want you there. He thinks you're super. We'll make sure you get home safely"

Joan laughed and agreed, "I'd be happy to join you, if you think I wouldn't be in the way. I must admit I think your husband is pretty special. I usually don't open up to people, but I found myself telling him things I never told anyone else. I can see why you two could be so happily married. You are both so kind and friendly."

Cindy gave her an exuberant hug and laughed. "Thanks, I'm so glad you are going to come with us."

When the game started, Cindy pointed out the key players. Joan referred to her program, and with Cindy's help, she soon learned the names of some of the players. Cindy beamed with pride when she talked about Lyle and Dave. They had played football together in college and had been best friends ever since. She told Joan the names of the other players, especially the front offensive line because they were the ones who were with Dave at the dinner at Adam's Rib.

"I don't know how you can remember all those names. With their uniforms and helmets on, they all look like identical mountains of muscle," Joan confessed. Cindy howled with laughter and agreed.

After the ball was kicked off, the Rams took possession on the 20 yard line. When Dave ran out onto the field, the crowd roared its approval. On the first play from the huddle, they ran the ball around the right end for a 5 yard gain. They made a first down with the ball on the 35 yard line. With another rushing play, they continued moving down the field. Dave passed a couple of times. One went for 5 yards; the other was dropped. On the next set of downs, Dave dropped back into the pocket. He looked to the left, then right, and threw a pass to one of the wide receivers about 30 yards downfield. The receiver reached up, pulled it down, and ran into the end zone. The crowd was on its feet roaring and cheering. The sound was nearly deafening. As Dave ran off the field, he pulled off his helmet and waved towards the box seats where Cindy and Joan were sitting. The crowd roared again.

Through the noise in the stadium, Cindy shouted, "That touchdown pass was for you. Dave told me he would get a touchdown in the first quarter for you. He asked me to tell you, but I didn't, because I didn't know if he could do it, because the Lions have a great defensive team. He said to enjoy the game, because he plans to put on quite a show for you," Cindy added.

Joan cheered along with the others. She watched as the Lions struggled part way up the field. They ended up punting. The Rams with Dave at the helm moved steadily up the field. He completed several more passes. When they were down at the 3 yard line, Dave faked a handoff to Alan, and then he ran untouched into the end zone for the second touchdown of the day. Each time he left the field after a good play, he waved. The crowd loved it, thinking he was waving to them. The game continued in the same way. The Rams played better than Cindy had ever seen them play before. Dave's passing and scrambling inspired the other players. By the time the half ended, the Rams were ahead 28-0.

Joan's voice was hoarse from cheering so loudly. Cindy's wasn't much better. During halftime, as they watched the cheerleaders perform, they visited and laughed some more.

One of the concessionaires walked over with two large stuffed bears. One wore a jersey with Lyle's number; the other had Dave's number. He handed Lyle's number to Cindy; then he smiled and handed the other one to Joan. There was a note attached to each one by a large silver and blue ribbon.

Cindy opened her note and read it aloud. "My dearest Cindy Thanks for five wonderful years and two fantastic sons. I love you. Lyle."

With trembling hands, Joan opened the envelope. She read the note out loud. "Dear Joan, Thanks for everything, from your number one fan. This game is dedicated to you. Without your quick thinking and actions, I wouldn't be here to play in it. Please come to the locker room after the game with Cindy. Dave."

Joan sat down holding the bear in her lap. Cindy noticed her quietness. "Will you come down with me? We are going to leave for my anniversary party from there. Lyle and Dave are really anxious to see you."

"I don't know. I hate being the center of attention. I feel uncomfortable in the limelight. I just don't like fusses made over me," she replied.

"Don't worry. I'll be there. I won't let anyone bother you. It would mean so much to me if you would go there and join Lyle and me for an anniversary drink. I'll promise to get you home safe and sound. Come on, you'll enjoy it", Cindy coaxed. "Lyle won't forgive me, if you don't come."

"All right. I guess it can't hurt. I do want to wish you and Lyle the best on your anniversary. He is a special person, and so are you," Joan murmured.

## Chapter 6

By the time the game was over, Joan had learned many of the players' names. When the final whistle blew, the score ended at 45 to 10. The fans began swarming for the exits. Cindy and Joan stayed in their places for several minutes, knowing it would take some time for the team to get into the locker room and change clothes. The Coliseum began to empty out, and shadows of the afternoon moved silently over the nearly deserted section.

After about 15 minutes, Cindy and Joan gathered up their belongings and headed for the lower tunnel. The guard near the team entrance greeted Cindy and opened the door for her. "Sounds like quite a celebration is going on down there," he said as they passed through.

"I had no idea there was all this space down here under the seating area. It's almost like an underground city with all the halls and doorways," Joan marveled.

As they approached the team area, Cindy and Joan noticed a group of men with cameras standing in the hallway. Joan stopped abruptly.

Cindy turned around and looked at her. "What's wrong?" she asked. "It's only some reporters. They won't hurt you."

"You go ahead," Joan gasped in a strained voice. "I think I'd better leave. I can't go down there with those reporters!"

"Joan, you can't leave now. You'll spoil everything. This is all in your honor. The team arranged to have a celebration for you. Come on," Cindy coaxed.

Joan turned around, trembling violently. "You don't understand! It will destroy my life, and all I've worked for during the last two years if I go down there. Please, Cindy, I'll do anything else, but not that. Help me get out of here. I'm begging you," Joan cried.

Cindy put her arm around Joan and quickly pushed her into an office marked Team Trainer. There was no one inside. She shut the door and tried to calm Joan down, but she saw it was no use.

"Wait here. I'll be right back. I won't let them see you I promise." Cindy promised as she slipped out into the long hallway. She walked quickly past the reporters, knocked on the door, and asked to speak to Lyle. When he came to the door and saw Cindy was alone, he pulled her inside.

"Where is she?" Lyle asked.

"She's in the Trainer's Office. When she saw the reporters, she got hysterical. I tried to get her to come in, but she's terrified of something. Can you come and talk to her? I didn't know what else to do," Cindy urged. "She's terribly upset."

"Let me fill Dave and Coach in, then I'll meet you in the Trainers Office. You'd better get back to her," Lyle advised.

Cindy slipped out. The reporters ganged around her. "Why is there all the secrecy? It looks like something's up," they asked

"I don't know. I just came to see how much longer Lyle would be. It's our anniversary, and I wanted to get home to the boys," she answered sweetly.

"Why won't they let us in?" another asked.

"You'll have to wait and hear that from the coach. I don't know. Lyle said they could be another half hour or more before they're ready to leave. That's all I know," she added.

She walked away from them and turned into the trainer's room. In a minute, Lyle entered through an inside door.

When he saw Joan, he walked over and put his arms around her and gave her a hug. She leaned her head against his chest and cried.

"This is getting to be a habit," he chuckled softly. "What's the matter?"

Joan looked up at him, fear and panic clearly showing on her face. "It's the reporters. If you care about me at all, please help me get out of here without any publicity. It would destroy my life here to put my picture or my name in the papers. I can't explain it, but it would mean my having to leave here and start all over again. Please help me," she begged.

Lyle looked down into her haunted eyes. He hugged her again. "You've got it. I'll get rid of them. You just stay here with Cindy. I won't let anyone bother you. I don't understand what the problem is, but I owe you that much. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be in this mess. Just calm down"

Lyle hurried back down to the locker room. He motioned for Dave to come over. Lyle quickly explained the fear Joan had of publicity, and how she was in the trainer's room nearly hysterical with fear. "I promised her I'd get her out without the reporters seeing her. I don't know how I can do it, but I'm going to keep that promise."

They called the coach over. After a few minutes of conversation, the coach gathered the players around. He told them that the press part of the celebration was off. He ordered, "Don't tell the reporters anything about Joan or what we had planned." They all agreed.

He had the reporters admitted. They came swarming in like summer mosquitoes. They asked a lot of questions, but the coach explained that he just needed a few minutes with the team before they opened the locker room to the news media. He stated it was just a routine team meeting.

The reporters turned to Dave. They sensed something was up, and they weren't about to let it drop without a story. Dave shrank away from publicity; he hated the stupid, prying questions they asked. In his college years, he had been so badly misquoted by the press that he usually refused interviews. The reporters kept asking questions. He didn't mind discussing the sports coverage of the game, but he hated the prying, personal questions the most. When it seemed the reporters weren't going to leave without a story. Dave finally promised to have a meeting with the press on Wednesday afternoon, if they would clear out now. A press meeting with Dave Allen was such an unusual occurrence, they agreed reluctantly to leave. Within five minutes, the reporters were all gone

Lyle went back down to where Joan and Cindy were waiting. "They're gone. It's safe for you to go to the locker room now. I promised I'd get the reporters to leave and they have. Let's go down now. Dave and some of the team still want to meet you. Is that all right, if there are no newsmen?" he asked.

"Why did you have to make a fuss? I said I didn't need to be thanked," Joan asked.

"Please trust me. I won't let anyone bother you. If it gets too bad, I'll get you out of there," Lyle promised.

Cindy took Joan's hand, and Lyle led them down the interior hallway to the locker room. When they entered, Lyle put his arm loosely around Joan's shoulder and escorted her into the center of the room. Joan blushed and looked down at the floor. When she looked up again, she saw that the men were all smiling at her.

The coach walked over, shook her hand, and welcomed her to the Ram's team. He explained that the men had all voted to make her an honorary member of the team because of what she done for Dave. Dave walked over next and draped a team jacket around her shoulders. She glanced up at him but quickly lowered her eyes. Next he handed her a huge bouquet of red roses. She held them in her arms and breathed in their heady aroma. Everyone cheered and she blushed furiously, turning nearly as red as the roses. Next they gave her a season ticket in Cindy's box.

"Speech! Speech," some of them called.

Joan looked up, tears in her eyes, at the sight of all the people smiling and welcoming her. Although she was still self-conscious, she cleared her throat and began to speak in a soft firm voice. "I don't know how to thank you for this honor. I've never been on a football team before, but after watching you play today, I'm glad I'm only an honorary member. It looks too dangerous out there on that field for me! I'll leave the game playing for you, but I'd be honored to come and cheer you on. Thank you for everything," she added looking around at all of them.

Lyle still stood by her right side, his arm protectively around her shoulder; Cindy stood on her left side. Dave stood a few feet away and silently watched her. The team laughed and cheered for her again. One by one, they came up and greeted her. Henry, one of the men that she recognized from the Adam's Rib, leaned over, and lightly kissed her cheek. She squeezed his hand. He flashed her a smile and playfully winked at her.

After everyone had filed by, the team members began drifting out of the locker room. Soon only five men remained behind. Joan realized they were the five men from the Adam's Rib. They were all going out with Cindy and Lyle to toast their fifth wedding anniversary.

"We'd better hurry up and meet our ladies," Jordan reminded Henry.

"Yeah, they'll be steamed enough about waiting so long for us already, but then we are worth it!" Henry bragged. "We'll meet you at the Sand Trap Bar."

Cindy hugged Joan, "I'm sorry if we embarrassed you or upset you. We only wanted to let you know how grateful we are for your saving Dave's life for us. Please forgive me for tricking you into coming here."

Joan looked at her and smiled. "I can't believe what just happened. I've never been so surprised or so pleased. This is the first time I ever received a bouquet of roses. They are so beautiful!" she sighed, slowly pressing her face closer to draw in their fragrance.

"The jacket is from all of the team. It was a unanimous vote to make you an honorary team member. As far as I know, that's never happened before. The season ticket was my idea. After meeting you, I'm even happier that we did it. Think how much fun we can have watching the games together. Even when I bring the boys, I feel lonely for adult company. Those gorgeous roses and the stuffed bear are from Dave. They were his idea," she added with a smile.

Joan looked up and saw Dave standing nearby looking intently at her. She glanced up into his eyes and realized they are even more beautiful than she remembered. In a shy voice, she whispered, "Thank you for the roses. They are so beautiful!"

"I can't believe they are the first roses you every received. Someone as beautiful as you should have been showered with roses," he declared softly.

## Chapter 7

Lyle gathered up his jacket and started ushering them out to the team parking area. He opened the car door for Cindy and Joan. Dave walked over to his car. Soon both cars were started, and they were all headed towards the ocean and the party at the Sand Trap. Joan settled back in Lyle's car. She felt so happy to be with them. She clutched the bouquet in her arms. Her team jacket and bear were laid on the back seat. Cindy offered to put the roses and the bear in the trunk, but Joan wanted to keep them with her. Lyle and Cindy chatted happily, easily drawing Joan into the conversation. The drive from the Coliseum to the Sand Trap passed in animated conversation. Lyle and Cindy led Joan into the back room at the Sand Trap. The light was dim and the sound of a small jazz combo added a cozy feeling to the area. There was a fire blazing in the fireplace and candles flickered in crystal candle holders on each table.

"I hope you like soft jazz," Cindy whispered to Joan. "It's our favorite music. We like the group that plays here. Lyle and I discovered this place right after we moved to the San Fernando Valley. When we want to celebrate, we usually head for here. The owners are huge Ram fans and always treat us like visiting royalty, especially when Dave is with us. Everyone loves Dave, including me."

After Joan pulled off her official Ram's jacket, she put her roses and the stuffed bear on the center of the table, and slid around the curved booth to sit next to Cindy. Lyle slid in from the other side and put his arm around Cindy's shoulder. "If Cindy said she loved any other man, except Dave, I'd be out gunning for him. I know Dave loves Cindy, too, but only like a sister. I love this little chatterbox! She's the best thing that ever happened in my life." he confessed quietly kissing Cindy's cheek.

Cindy turned her face towards Lyle and snuggled closer to him. Joan looked at them and smiled. "What anniversary did you say this is? Are you sure you aren't still newlyweds?" she asked with a laugh.

"I still feel like a bride, because Lyle is the greatest guy on earth. I'm so lucky to be married to him, and I owe it all to Dave. He introduced us back in college. Dave and I were in the same business math class. Can you believe I was thinking about majoring in business administration? After meeting Lyle, I decided to major in him. I've never regretted it for a minute. Between loving Lyle and our boys, I couldn't ask for anything more," Cindy added, happily squeezing Lyle's hand.

Joan looked around when she heard other voices moving towards them. Before she could say a word, Dave slid around the booth and sat next to her. He lifted the roses and bear off the table and said, "May I present these to you personally?" Joan shyly took them from his hand and thanked him again.

Henry, Alonzo, and Jordan arrived a few moments later with their dates. After introductions were made, they pulled a couple of tables over and formed one large group. They ordered champagne and proposed toasts to Lyle and Cindy.

"Congratulations for making it through five years of wedded bliss, for creating two beautiful children, and for staying as nice as any two people I've ever known. May you have 100 more years of happiness together," Dave saluted them.

"Right on!" Jordon roared. They all raised their glasses and drank to Lyle and Cindy's happiness. After some good-natured conversation, Jordan, Alonzo, and Henry asked their dates to dance. Soon Lyle and Cindy walked out on the dance floor, too. The jazz trio was playing a slow melody.

Sitting alone in the large curved booth, Dave looked over at Joan. "Would you dance with me?" Dave asked softly.

"I'm not a good dancer, but I'll give it a try, if you're brave enough," Joan answered.

"I'm willing to take my chances. After being pounded by some of the toughest tacklers in the National Football League, I think I can survive a dance with you! Come on," he chuckled, leading her onto the dance floor. He put his arms around her and gently pulled her up against his body. When they began moving to the slow music, he pulled her closer. Gradually, Joan began to relax in the warm support of his arms. As Dave led her confidently around the floor, she found her body fitting perfectly against him. They moved easily in time to the music. Dave leaned his head down close to her forehead and whispered quietly, "I'll never be able to thank you enough for saving my life. It seems like a miracle to me that you just happened to be there when I needed you," he pressed his lips against her forehead and squeezed her closer.

Joan happily hugged him back. "I'm very glad I was there, too. You seem like a nice guy. I'm happy that I had the chance to meet you and see you at work. Meeting you has helped me a lot," she answered.

He looked at her with a puzzled expression. He started to ask what she meant, but she stopped him. "It's a long story, and nothing I want to get into now," she insisted quietly and laid her cheek against his chest. Through the soft material of Dave's sweater, she heard the strong rhythmic beating of his heart and felt the warmth of his arms around her. She suddenly began to giggle.

Dave looked down at her with a puzzled grin, "What's so funny? What are you giggling about?"

Joan laughed, "I'm sorry. Maybe it's the champagne talking or just the crazy way my mind works sometimes. I was just thinking that your heart is beating much louder and faster now than it did the first time I put my cheek against your chest."

Dave chuckled a deep musical sound that bubbled up out of the depths of his chest. "No wonder," he laughed, "that other time I couldn't see you, feel you, or touch you like I am right now. Too bad I can't remember all those times your lips touched mine. What a waste of beautiful memories," he whispered softly against her hair. He put his hand under her chin and tilted her face up, looking into her deep blue eyes; he slowly lowered his lips to gently cover hers. As they swayed together to the music, his tongue darted out and lightly traced her lips. Without meaning to, Joan's lips parted to receive the intoxicating sweetness of his tongue. Her arms slid up around his neck. As the kiss deepened, they lost all sense of where they were. She felt herself being swept away into a warm sensuous world safely wrapped in the circle of his arms. When the music ended, their lips slowly separated. For a moment longer, he looked down at her in his arms before releasing her and leading her back to the table. They slid into the booth and sat silently. Each seemed almost afraid to speak for fear of breaking the magic spell their kiss had created. Dave slid his arm around her shoulders and his large hand covered hers. With a shy smile, Joan laced her fingers through his.

Henry and Phyllis, the model he was currently dating, and Jordan and his steady girlfriend wandered back over and sat down. Lyle and Cindy joined them. After another drink, the couples began leaving. Alonso and Marge left first heading for Malibu.

Lyle squeezed Cindy and gave her a big kiss. "It's time for us to go to home," Cindy apologized, "I hate leaving the boys for very long with a sitter. I like to be home with my three favorite guys."

Lyle hugged Cindy and then said to Dave and Joan, "The night is still young. Why don't you two stay a while longer? The music is great; the champagne is bubbly; and I think you two have things to talk about."

"How about it? I'll see that you get home safely. I would really like to talk to you some more. No strings, just some conversation, and a few more dances," Dave added with a friendly smile.

"I've had a lot of fun, but I should get home soon," Joan hesitated.

"Just a few more minutes, Joan. I'm always so keyed up after a game. It would be wonderful to spend some time talking to you and getting to know you better," Dave encouraged her.

"Go ahead, I'll vouch for Dave. He's a gentleman and a great person to talk to. If I didn't already love Lyle, I'd stay here with him myself," Cindy added with a laugh.

"All right. It sounds like fun. I've had such a wonderful time today! It has all been like a dream. It is something I will never forget: my first bouquet of roses, my first football game, my first time being on a football team, and meeting all of you. I guess it can't hurt to stay a little longer," she added. Joan realized she'd almost put 'our first kiss' in her list of memorable moments.

"That's great. You have my phone number, don't you? I really do want you to come over and visit me. I'd love to show off my boys and have you as a friend. I had a great time with you today," Cindy gushed.

"Yes, I have your phone number, and I'd be happy to come visit you. I'll call you tomorrow," Joan promised.

"I'll be waiting to hear from you. Goodnight, Dave and Joan. Thanks for coming out and helping us celebrate," Cindy added before they turned and walked away from the table.

Dave squeezed her hand, "I hope I didn't put you on the spot. Do you mind staying here with me a little longer? I really do want to get to know you better, but I promise I'll take you home whenever you want to go. I'll be on my best behavior. I have to behave or Cindy will be furious with me. No illegal forward passes," he quipped.

Joan giggled, "I'll bet you're used to having all your passes completed," she teased.

"Only on the football field, Joan. I'm really not much good at making the other kind of pass. Throwing them on the football field is the only kind I do," he answered seriously. "I never dated much in college. I was too busy practicing and playing football," he added.

After talking a few more minutes, Dave reached into his jacket pocket. He pulled out the notebook and put it on the table in front of her.

Joan picked it up with a smile. "I was looking all over for this. Where did you find it?"

"Lyle found it at the restaurant after you'd left. I hope you won't be angry, but I read it. I'm very impressed by the way you write. I especially liked your description of Henry. You must be very observant. You captured his personality as well as his looks. I am very flattered by what you wrote about me. I hope you will think as highly of me now as you did then. I didn't mean to pry into your life, but I was so curious about this mysterious woman who brought me back from the dead. There is such an odd mixture of writing and information in your notebook. What's it all about?" he asked hesitantly

"I'll bet it did make you wonder. I'm a freelance writer. Anytime I am working on an article or story, or if I just see something interesting, I jot it down in my notebook. It's easier for me to do that than to try to remember it later. I normally don't let people read my notes, but I guess there's no harm done. Thanks for getting it back to me. I hated the idea of having to do all the research and planning again on my article on the beach bike paths. It has to be finished by next month."

"Where have your articles been published? Might I have read them?"

"I doubt if you've seen many of them unless you read small trade publications. I have had a series of travel articles published over the last two years in Sunset Magazine. The bicycle path article is going to be published in the March issue. The others include one on Santa Barbara area attractions like the botanical garden, Santa Barbara Mission, the Child's Estate Zoo, and the harbor art shows. Another article was on weekend vacation trips in San Diego County. My favorite one was about the Napa Valley wine country. Doing that research was intoxicatingly fun," she laughed.

Dave asked her about her articles and she talked freely about her writing. He noticed that whenever he tried to turn the subject to her personal life, she fielded the questions and sidestepped answering them.

She smiled and asked him about his football career. He found himself talking freely to her, but no matter how hard he tried, he only learned a few facts about her. She worked as an office manager in an auto parts supply store.

"What did you do before you started working there? Were you ever in nursing? How did you know what to do when I was choking?" Dave asked.

Joan put her finger against his lips. "Please don't ask any more questions. I like you and I don't want to be forced to tell you any lies. I can't answer any more questions now. Just be content with who I am now and don't worry about the past," she begged.

"Whatever you say, Joan, but you are one beautiful mystery woman. I'd love to be able to figure you out," he whispered as he picked up her hand and began gently kissing her fingertips.

"I'm really not that interesting, Dave. I just value and guard my privacy." she leaned back against him and laid her head against his chest. She was acutely aware of the warmth of his body and his musky manly aroma.

Dave led her onto the dance floor. He held her gently in his arms. Not wanting to take a chance on spoiling the peace of the evening with her, he avoided asking anymore questions. He concentrated on her writing, listening to her carefully. He was impressed by her beauty and her intelligence. He decided to bide his time. "Once she knows me better, maybe she will open up and tell me more about herself," Dave thought.

After a few more dances, Joan said, "I need to get home. It is getting very late, and I have to work tomorrow. Would you please call me a cab?"

"No way! I have my car here, and I'll drive you home. I promised Cindy I would make sure you get home safely. You wouldn't want me to get in trouble with Cindy, would you? I said I'd take you home, and that's what I intend to do."

Once she was seated in Dave's car, Joan held the stuffed bear and bouquet of red roses on her lap. She told Dave to drive back to Santa Monica Blvd. and then turn onto Sunset Blvd. As they approached the area near Adam's Rib, she directed him to the Lincoln Arms Apartment building. When he pulled up to the front door, there were no parking places.

Joan hopped out when he came to a stop. "Thanks for the wonderful evening," she said quickly. She gathered up the bear and the roses and turned to leave.

"Wait until I park and I'll walk you to your apartment," he called out.

"No, that's not necessary. I can get there from here. It's very late now, and I need to be up early for work tomorrow. I'll be fine. Thanks again," she called as she turned to go inside.

"Wait, when will I see you again?" he asked.

"I don't know, but I'll be at the next home game. Maybe I'll see you then. Thanks for the beautiful roses," she added.

"How about dinner this week?" he asked.

"Thanks for asking, but I don't think it would be a good idea. Dave, you're a great guy, but I just can't. I'm sorry," she said walking quickly into the building.

Dave watched her go into the building and enter the elevator before he pulled away. He shook his head at her strange behavior. "I'll find a way to break down that wall she builds up when someone gets too close. I'm going to get to know you. You can count on that," Dave vowed as he drove away.

## Chapter 8

Joan rode up to the second floor and then pushed the down button. When she got back out in the lobby, she peered cautiously outside. Dave's car was gone. Since her boss used to live in the building, Joan knew the building's lay out. She went down the hallway to the pay phone. She called a cab and waited by the door until it pulled up in front. Carrying the roses and the stuffed bear and still wearing the Rams jacket, she dashed out and climbed into the cab. She gave the cabbie her address and sank back into the cushions for the ride home.

In spite of the jacket's thickness, she didn't feel as warm as she had felt in Dave's car with his arm draped loosely around her shoulder. She remembered the light way his lips had covered hers and sighed. It had been a perfect evening, one she would never forget. She was honest enough with herself to admit that she found Dave very attractive and that she thoroughly enjoyed his kisses. She also knew getting involved with him or with any man was too risky. Because of curious people, she had been forced to pull up stakes and move on. She didn't want to leave now that she had been promoted, but Dave was definitely too attractive and too dangerous to see again.

Joan smiled when she thought about Cindy. It would be wonderful to have her for a friend. Her time with Cindy made her realize how much she had missed out on by not having a close female friend. Cindy was such a bubbly, fun person; Joan decided she would call Cindy. A female friend would not complicate her life. It would only make her life better.

Once inside the safety of her small apartment, Joan carefully placed the roses in a large vase. The beauty of the flowers brightened up the drab interior and the sweet fragrance filled the room. Joan reached out and touched the delicate petals before sitting down on the sofa. She closed her eyes and breathed in the intoxicating aroma. She hugged the stuffed bear, and she trembled as she remembered how warm and inviting Dave's arms had felt and the feeling of desire that his kisses had aroused. She shook her head in wonder.

After Larry's death and all the turmoil, she thought all feelings of desire were dead inside her. She realized now those emotions had only been lying dormant. Dave's touch and his gentle kisses had awakened her feelings. Like a sleeping giant, they were coming awake, demanding to be released.

Realizing those feelings could never be expressed or fulfilled, she choked back a sob. She pulled off her clothes and sank down into her bed. A feeling of loneliness and sorrow filled her as she tossed and turned. It took a long time for sleep to finally overtake her. By the time she fell asleep, she decided that she must keep way from Dave. He was much too attractive and aroused feelings in her that were best left buried. Getting involved with any man was dangerous, but being around Dave was impossible. Joan knew Dave's feelings of respect for her were very important to her. She could not face the thought of seeing disgust or horror in his eyes when he looked at her. Joan realized if she was not careful, she could easily fall in love with Dave, and that would destroy everything she'd worked for since moving to Los Angeles. "I'd better be careful. Getting close to Dave is too dangerous," she sighed.

As Dave was driving home, he cursed angrily. "I forgot to get her phone number. How can I get her to go out with me, if I can't even talk to her on the phone? I guess I can always go back to her apartment, since I know what building she lives in."

He sighed thinking how deeply her kisses had affected him. She had come alive in his arms and seemed to become part of his body. He could still remember the feel of her body pressed against his when they danced and kissed on the dance floor. She fitted perfectly against him, almost as if she were a missing part of him that had finally been reunited. He wanted her, of that he was sure. By her response to his kisses, she seemed to want him, too, but her lack of openness about her past bothered him.

"Joan, you and I have some unfinished business. I'm going to solve the mystery about you. I don't know how I know it, but you and I were meant to be together. You just don't know it yet," he vowed.

After Dave got home, he hung up his jacket in the hall closet. He began digging through the heavily stacked shelves on the bookcase in the library. After some searching, he managed to find the last 12 issues of Sunset magazine. He had never taken the time to read them completely, although he had glanced through them when they arrived in the mail. Now he opened them, quickly scanned the table of contents in each one and looked for the articles Joan had written. They were not there. He began going through them again. There was an article about Santa Barbara in the June issue. Weekend trips in San Diego County was in the September issue. One about Napa Valley wineries was in the January issue. They were exactly as Joan had described them. The only problem was they had been written by a man named George Adkinson. There was even a picture of the author. He appeared to be about thirty with a dark beard and dark eyes.

"What's going on here?" he asked himself. "Why would she lie to me about writing these? Who is George Adkinson, and what is he to Joan?" Dave muttered.

The next day Dave decided to take the bull by the horns, so to speak, and try to locate George Adkinson. He looked in the phone book. There was no George Adkinson or Joan Marshall listed anywhere near the Lincoln Arms Apartment complex. His next call was to the publishing office of Sunset Magazine. Without identifying himself, he mentioned how much he had enjoyed the articles written by George Adkinson. "I think he might be an old college friend that I've lost contact with. I would love to get in touch with him." Dave turned on the charm, and, with a little sweet talk and flattery, he got the phone number of George Adkinson from the receptionist.

"I shouldn't be giving this out," the receptionist said hesitantly.

"You don't need to worry. I won't tell him how I got it. If it is my old buddy, he won't mind. If it turns out to be a different George Adkinson, he'll never know where I got the number. Either way, what could it hurt? I really do want to talk to him. It would mean a lot to me," he coaxed.

"Well, I guess it can't cause any trouble. I hope that you find your friend," she said as she gave him George's unlisted phone number. After he hung up, he was amazed by how easily he had fooled the receptionist. He knew talking to George Adkinson would be a different story. He tried to think how to approach the subject of Joan with George, but he decided, for now, all he would do is call and ask about the article on Santa Barbara. Maybe hearing his voice would give him a clue. Perhaps he might even mention her.

"I may be spinning my wheels, but I've got to find out what she's hiding?" he thought as he slowly dialed the number. On the third ring, the phone was answered. In shock he heard a familiar woman's voice on the taped message on the answering machine. "George and I are both busy right now and can't come to the phone. If you leave your name and number at the tone, one of us will call you back when we are free." Joan's voice flowed across the phone lines. When the tone sounded, Dave hung up without saying a word. He stared at the telephone.

"What's going on here?" he thought out loud. "They both obviously live there. "What kind of relationship does she have with him? The way she responded to my kisses last night, I'm sure she's not in love with him, but she must be living with him. That's all I know for sure. If she isn't in love with him, there's still a chance for me. I've got to get her to spend more time with me. Maybe, when she knows me better, she'll tell me about George. The thought of her being with another man, any man but me, makes me want to strangle him. I can't let her know that I know about George. She has to tell me what's going on between them. When she does, then I can tell her how I feel. Maybe by then, she'll be enough in love with me to leave George. Somehow I'm going to win her away from him," he vowed.

Remembering the feel of her body pressed against him, of her lips parting eagerly accepting his kiss, and the smell of her hair and skin, Dave felt desire rising in him until he ached with the need to see her and touch her again. Dave cursed angrily as he realized how much he wanted Joan's love.

"I want you to love me, only me. God knows I want you more than any woman I've ever met. I know we've only met, but I know for sure that I want all of you, for always and forever," he moaned.

On Monday, just as she had promised, Joan called Cindy. Cindy bubbled over the phone about how much fun she'd had at the game and afterwards at the Sand Trap. She asked Joan how things had gone with Dave after everyone left. Softly Joan replied, "We had a very nice talk."

"Dave's a real sweetheart. He really seems smitten with you," Cindy teased.

"He's just grateful for my saving his life. He is a nice person and was just being polite," Joan responded.

Cindy laughed, "Dave is polite, but not like the way he was with you. I know you're shy, so I won't say anything more, but I think you liked each other, didn't you?"

"Of course, I liked him. He is very interesting."

"Very attractive, too." Cindy kidded.

"I thought you weren't going to tease me anymore," Joan chided Cindy.

"Okay, I'll be good. When are you going to come and visit me? I have an idea. How would you like to come and sample some of Lyles famous 'flaming yawns'?" Cindy asked with a laugh.

"What's a 'flaming yawn'? I've never heard of that," Joan asked

"That's what little Davey calls a fillet mignon. He loves the meat, but he can't say the word yet. I think it will always be called 'flaming yawns' at our house , even when he is older and can say the words correctly," Cindy giggled.

Joan laughed along with Cindy. "I'd love to try a flaming yawn. Just let me know when you want me to come over? I'm dying to meet your boys," Joan added.

"How about Saturday afternoon? Lyle has a short practice that day, so he's home by about three, but why don't you come over about one. We can have a good gab session and play with the boys before he gets home. I love to BBQ and have company over. That's something I miss since we moved here. We don't have many people over. Between Lyle's being on the road so much with the team and me being tied down with two lovable rug rats, we don't entertain much," she explained.

"That sounds like fun. I'd love to come? What can I bring? How about some wine or ice cream?" Joan asked.

"You don't have to bring anything, but either one sounds great. If you want to bring something, I know the boys will adore you if you bring them ice cream."

"That settles it. I'll bring some ice cream. I'm not above resorting to a little bribery," Joan kidded. After getting the directions to Cindy's house in North Hollywood, Joan hung up the phone. She smiled with pleasure at the thought of seeing Lyle and Cindy again. She couldn't help wondering if the boys would look more like a blonde Cindy or have Lyle's darker coloring. Joan marked the date and time on her calendar, then returned to work on her bike path article.

After the press conference Dave had promised to have on Wednesday, he returned to the dressing room. He slammed his locker door. Lyle looked over at him and shrugged, "Was it that bad?" he asked.

"Worse!" Dave muttered. "Why can't they just leave me alone? They ask such stupid questions, like 'How did you feel when Rosen sacked you last week for a 10 yard loss?' Of course, I felt awful about it! What kind of idiot couldn't figure that out? They keep prying and hinting around about my personal life. What I do off the field is none of their business."

"That's the price you pay for success," Lyle announced.

"They even had the nerve to suggest that unless I was more open about my personal life, someone was going to start making up stories just to make money off the 'public's curiosity'," he ranted.

"They may be right. Some people don't care about the truth, just selling magazines and making money. It isn't right, but what are you going to do about it?" Lyle asked.

"I think I have an idea, but it all depends on Joan. I wish I knew how to get in touch with her. I don't understand what's going on, but she didn't give me her phone number. I tried to locate her at her apartment building, but the manager says he has never had a Joan Marshall living at the Lincoln Arms Apartment, but that's where I left her after the night at the Sand Trap. That probably explains why she hurried off and didn't want me to walk her to her apartment. Lyle, she's driving me crazy. I've never met anyone like her before. I keep thinking about her, and I can't even be sure when I'll see her again," he ranted in frustration.

"You've really got it bad," Lyle laughed. "I don't know much more about her, but I do know how you can see her again. Are you interested? I think it can be arranged."

"Are you kidding? I'd do almost anything to see her. What's the plan?" Dave asked quickly.

"I should check with Cindy first, but Joan is coming to our house on Saturday for a barbecue. If you happen to come home with me after practice to see the boys, you just might see her, too," Lyle kidded.

"You've got another guest for dinner. I don't know how I can ever thank you, Lyle. Have you ever had trouble sleeping nights because you kept thinking about someone?" Dave asked.

"Yeah, lots of time before I married Cindy; now when I have trouble sleeping, it's a lot more fun," Lyle added.

## Chapter 9

Joan parked her car in front of a beige two-story house. She walked up the sidewalk leading to the front door. The front of the house was a mass of snow white star jasmine plants and rose geraniums. Joan smiled when she smelled the sweet fragrance that surrounded her. When she knocked on the door, Cindy opened it and grabbed Joan's hand. "I'm so glad you got here. Did you have any trouble finding it? The boys are still taking their naps so that will give us time to get better acquainted. Come on into the family room. Lyle's been working hard remodeling it. He paneled the wall by the fireplace and added the shelves and the new mantelpiece," she pointed out as she led Joan over to the couch. Sinking down next to Joan, she took Joan's hand again. "I've been looking forward to this all week. It isn't often that I get to have a gab session with another woman. So how was work this week? Tell me all about yourself. I'll even try to be quiet long enough for you to answer," she giggled. "Lyle always kids me about talking too much, but I really think he likes it." Joan laughed as Cindy continued to chatter on.

"Well I definitely like your talking. I prefer to listen, so we should get along fine," Joan added.

"Do you want to go peek in on the boys? They look so sweet and peaceful when they're asleep. Davey is a live wire when he's awake. You won't believe the difference once you see it," she added, leading Joan down the hallway. She quietly opened the door and led her inside. A towheaded boy of about four was sprawled on top of his crumpled blanket in a twin bed. The room was decorated with football posters and pennants. Joan looked at Cindy then at Davey's sleeping form. He definitely had her hair coloring, but she wasn't sure about his eyes yet. She did agree that he looked like an angel sleeping there.

They tiptoed across the hallway to the baby's room. "This precious little boy is named Billy. He's still pretty quiet, but then he's only nine months old. He's trying to stand up, but he's not quite ready. I don't know what I'm going to do when he is walking, too. I'm exhausted already with one toddler," she sighed, gently kissing his forehead.

Joan looked down at Billy and tears formed in her eyes. She turned away quickly hoping Cindy had not noticed her distress. After they were seated in the family room, they began drinking a glass of iced tea. Cindy looked at Joan seriously. "Why did you start to cry in Billy's room? I thought it might be fun to see them sleeping," she asked softly.

Joan looked startled and began to lie, and then she stopped. "He is so beautiful. Babies have that effect on me. There is something so delicate and precious about them," she whispered.

Cindy looked deep in her eyes. "Joan, that's not the whole truth, is it"?

Joan stammered and looked guilty. "No. How did you know?"

"Just instinct, I guess. What made you so sad in there?" Cindy asked gently.

"As a child I always dreamed about having a family like yours, but it didn't work out for me. I guess some dreams die hard even after you're grown up," Joan admitted.

"Why didn't you get married and have a family? You're so pretty, I am sure you had the opportunity," Cindy prodded gently.

"I was married a long time ago. My baby died when I was seven months along. Seeing a baby reminds me of what I lost. I'm rarely around babies, but it still hurts, even after all these years," Joan admitted.

Cindy put her arm around Joan's shoulder and handed her a tissue. Joan wiped her eyes and tried to smile. Cindy squeezed her shoulder. "Why didn't you and your husband try again?" she asked sympathetically.

Cindy felt a shudder run through Joan. She was silent for a minute and appeared to be struggling for control. Finally she answered very softly, "He died, too."

"How terrible, Joan. My sister lost a baby, too. It was very hard on her. That must have been awful for you to lose both. I can see how much it still upsets you. If you ever need someone to talk to or just a shoulder to cry on, I can be a good listener," Cindy offered.

"Thanks, Cindy, but I still don't talk about it, not to anyone, but if I ever did, it would be to someone like you. Thanks for being so caring, but the past is best left buried. Nothing in it can be changed, no matter how much I wish it could," Joan sighed. Joan looked at Cindy and tried to smile. "I love your house. You and Lyle have done wonderful things with it," she said trying to change the subject.

Cindy took her and showed her the rest of the house. By the time the tour was finished, Davey was awake. He caught up to them in the kitchen. For one minute, he clung shyly to Cindy's leg and peeked out at Joan. After a quick introduction and a small dish of the ice cream that Joan had brought, they were on their way to becoming best buddies. Back in the family room, Davey dumped out his set of wooden blocks. He sat on the floor and asked Joan to help him build a 'really tall tower'. Cindy laughed and told Joan that she didn't have to crawl around on the floor with Davey, but Joan sat down next to Billy and handed him his blocks. He put one on top of the other until the tower got so wobbly, it toppled over. Joan laughed when they fell, and Davey joined her laughter.

"I've got to go feed Billy and check on dinner. Lyle should be home soon. Will you keep an eye on Davey?" she asked.

"Sure. That's fine we'll build the biggest tower in the whole world, won't we, Davey?" Joan asked.

Cindy left to go feed Billy, while Davey and Joan continued playing on the floor. They were so absorbed in their construction work that neither of them noticed the tall man standing in the doorway watching them. When the tower was nearly as tall as Davey, he gave it a push and howled with laughter while the blocks scattered around the room. A deep masculine chuckle blended with their laughter causing both of them to look up. Davey jumped up and down and dashed across the room. He tackled the two legs and shouted, "Uncle Dave." Dave bent down, scooped him up and tossed him high into the air. Davey squealed with delight and came down giggling. He gave him a big hug and a loud kiss before wiggling out of his arms and dashing off to find his daddy. Dave looked down at Joan surrounded by the blocks.

He laughed, "You look like you just survived an earthquake of at least a nine on the 'Davey' scale from the destruction I see. Do you need any help rebuilding?"

Joan laughed and answered, "No, just help me get up from here. I think my legs have gone to sleep."

He reached down, took her outstretched hand, and pulled her up. His arms naturally went around her waist and pulled her close in a gentle hug. He looked into her eyes and started to kiss her until Davey dashed back into the room. He pushed his way in between them. Dave scooped Davey up still keeping one arm around Joan's shoulder.

"Uncle Dave, help Joan and me build a giant tower. Please, please, please!" he begged.

"Sure thing, Davey, if Joan feels like another close encounter with the floor." he agreed, looking intently at her.

"That's the best offer I've had in the last 20 minutes. First we'd better get the blocks gathered up so we have lots of room to work," Joan suggested. They sat together on the floor playing with Davey and laughing together at his pleasure in knocking the towers over. Sometimes they both reached for the same block and their hands touched. When that happened, their eyes met and the tension between them grew nearly unbearable. Joan felt a sense of relief when Cindy and Lyle walked in and announced that dinner was ready.

Lyle reached down and pulled Joan to her feet. After eating, they all returned to the family room. Davey rushed off to take his bath and get ready for bed, because Dave promised to read him a story before he left. Since there was a game the next day, the evening had to end very early. Cindy left to change Billy and get him ready for bed. Lyle disappeared after Billy to be sure he washed behind his ears and didn't flood the bathroom again.

Joan and Dave sat on a couch and sipped a glass of wine. He put his arm around her shoulders. "Those are two great kids. Every time I see them, I feel a little jealous of Lyle and Cindy. They have everything that is important-- their kids and their love. I want the same things. How about you?" Dave asked.

Joan looked down with a blush rising on her cheeks. "They do seem to have it all. It would be wonderful, but sometimes it just doesn't work out the same way for everyone."

Dave started to speak, but stopped when Cindy entered the room carrying Billy. Davey came rushing in all scrubbed and clean-smelling in his Rams pajamas. He climbed up on Dave's lap and asked for a story. "Do you want to hear a story?" Dave asked Joan as he lifted Davey up into his arms."

"No. You go up. I'll peek in later and say goodnight to both of you. Is that okay, Davey?" Joan asked softly.

Davey nodded yes. He asked his Uncle Dave, "Give me a piggyback ride to bed." Dave hoisted him up onto his shoulders and trotted out of the room.

Joan watched him leave and sighed, "He's very good with children, isn't he? He'll make a good father someday."

Cindy observed, "You aren't too bad with the kids, either. It's not too late for you to have children of your own. You could get married and have a family in no time at all," she hinted softly.

Joan shook her head sadly, "That may be true for other people, but it just isn't in my future, no matter how much I'd like it." When Lyle walked in, Joan quickly changed the subject to the game on the next day.

Joan looked at her watch and announced, "It's getting late and I'd better be leaving soon."

"Don't forget your promise to look in on Davey before you go home," Cindy reminded her.

"Of course, I'll sneak in and say goodnight to both guys at once." When she got to the bedroom door, she stood quietly listening to Dave finish reading the Little Engine that Could. Davey gave him a big hug and a noisy kiss.

Joan entered quietly and walked over to Davey's bed. Dave caught her hand and pulled her down onto his lap. "Look what I caught sneaking in here to listen to our story," he joked. "What shall we do with her?"

"Let's keep her and make her tell us a story,' Davey squealed.

"Not tonight, Davey. I have to leave soon. I just came to say goodnight to both of you," she confessed, trying in vain to wiggle out of Dave's arms

" Davey's right. I say we keep you here forever, unless you promise to tell us a story next time," Dave suggested, giving Joan a playful wink.

"You drive a hard bargain. I promise next time I'll tell you a story, but tonight I have to leave," Joan giggled.

"You'd better get to bed now, Tiger. We've got a big game tomorrow, and all of us big boys need to get to sleep. Davey, go right to sleep now so you can be wide awake at the game tomorrow." Dave finally released Joan. She scrambled to her feet, but Dave was just a step behind her.

At the door, Joan turned and said, "Sleep tight, Davey, I'll see you at the game tomorrow."

Cindy and Lyle walked them to the door. "Now remember, I'll meet you tomorrow at the game. I'll have the boys with me, but we can still have lots of fun. Thanks for coming over today. I really enjoyed talking to you. I hope you'll come and visit again soon," Cindy exclaimed, giving Joan a big hug.

"Thanks to you and Lyle for inviting me. The food was delicious. Your boys are beautiful, and I had a wonderful time. I'll see you tomorrow," Joan added.

Joan gave Lyle a big hug and a kiss on the cheek, "Good luck at the game tomorrow," she said, hugging him again.

"Thanks, sweet lady. I'll do my best," he answered back.

Dave and Joan walked down the sidewalk together. At the curb, Dave took her hand, "May I drive you home?" he asked.

"No thanks. I have my car here," she nodded, indicating the small blue Volkswagen across the street. He took her arm and escorted her across the road.

"You know, I should be mad at you. You play favorites," Dave said pouting like a little kid.

Joan laughed. "What are you talking about?"

"You hugged and kisseded Lyle and wish him 'good luck', but you didn't do that to me," he complained continuing his pouting act,

With a soft giggle, Joan put her arms quickly around Dave. She gave him a hurried hug and a peck on the cheek. "Good luck at the game tomorrow," she repeated sweetly. "Well, Dave, are you satisfied now?"

Dave pulled Joan into his arms in a tight hug and kissed her tenderly with increasing passion. "With you, sweet Joan, one kiss and one hug would never be enough to satisfy me. Another kiss like this, and I know I'd never want to stop. But I must for now," he added gently. Joan trembled in his arms and felt desire beginning to surge through her body.

Dave slowly released her and opened her car door. He helped her into her car and shut the door. He reached through the window and lightly caressed her face. "Goodbye, until we meet again," he whispered.

Joan started her car and drove away from the curb. She kept looking in the rearview mirror until she turned the corner and Dave disappeared from view. As she drove to her apartment, she was shaken to realize if he had not let her go she wanted to stay in his arms all night. With a vague sense of disappointment and loneliness, she drove home in silence.

## Chapter 10

Dave watched her drive away. He felt like screaming. All evening he tried to give her an opening to tell him about George. As long as George stood between them, he couldn't trust her. He knew he wanted her like no other woman in the world, He cursed at the thought of her driving home to George. More than anything, he wanted her to tell him about George and that George meant nothing to her. As he drove to his house, he decided he had to take action and find a way to get Joan to spend more time with him. Tomorrow after the game, he would suggest his proposition to her. Somehow he would get her to agree. The way his body reacted to her closeness, he didn't know how much longer he could stand being close to her without taking her into his arms and making love to her. The thought of her body lying next to him filled him with sweet torture. He found his bed especially big and lonely that night.

The next day, Joan met Cindy in the box seats in the Coliseum. The noise of the crowd swirled around them as they tried to talk and keep Davey and Billy entertained. Cindy divided her attention between them, not even appearing to be frazzled by the effort. Cindy kept up a steady stream of chatter. Davey jumped up and down and yelled with the crowd each time the Rams made a good play. Even though he was little, he knew a lot about the game. Joan laughed when he explained the game to her. It wasn't because he told it incorrectly. It was just the way he bounced around as he pointed out his dad and the others. After Dave threw a long pass, Davey threw his arms around Joan. She found herself jumping up and down with Davey in her arms.

Cindy looked at them and laughed, "Well, you've become a rabid fan in a very short time. Wait, I forgot. You have to cheer. After all, you're a member of the team," Cindy teased.

"I guess you're right about that. I'm not sure I really understand what's happening, but I can't help joining in with the crowd. Of course, with Davey's tutoring, I should be a football expert in another game or two," Joan laughed, giving Davey a quick squeeze.

During halftime, one of the ushers delivered a large box to Joan. She watched as Davey pulled off the blue and silver ribbon and opened the box. She looked inside in time to see a dozen long stemmed yellow roses tucked down in the box; Joan saw a small folded note tucked in with the flowers. She quickly unfolded the note and read it silently. After a moment of silence, she turned and read it to Cindy. "Thanks again for giving me a chance to live and play football. Please meet me after the game. I have a problem, and I really need your help. Signed, Dave."

"Do you have any idea what kind of problem Dave has?" Cindy asked.

Joan shook her head, "I haven't the slightest clue. I can't imagine any way that I could help him with a problem.

"Are you going to meet him?" Cindy asked.

"I don't know what to do, Cindy; Dave scares me. He is just too attractive, and I can't afford to get involved with anyone," Joan answered.

"I don't know what kind of problem Dave has, but I know one thing; I wouldn't hesitate to find out. He's the kind of guy you can trust. I'd gladly help him in any way that I can. He's a special guy, but I can see by your expression that you already think he's pretty special, too. What could it hurt to meet him and find out?" Cindy asked.

"You're right, Cindy. He's becoming too special to me," Joan admitted with a slight blush. "I just don't know what to do. I'd like to help him, but I'm afraid of becoming too involved."

"What's so wrong with that? You are both single and obviously attracted to each other. It sounds like a perfect arrangement to me," she continued.

"It's a long sad story and not one I can talk about. Just trust me on this, Cindy. I can't let myself get involved with anyone, no matter how attractive he may be."

"Well, what do you think? Are you going to meet him?" Cindy prodded.

"I feel like I at least owe him the courtesy of finding out what he needs. I've never turned away from a friend if I thought I could help. As you pointed out, what could it hurt to meet him and hear what he has to say?" Joan answered. Once the decision was made, Joan tried to settle back and enjoy the second half of the game, but disturbing thoughts kept running through her mind. She felt her heart beating faster as she remembered the emotions he had aroused in her with just one kiss last night. For a moment, she could almost feel his arms around her again. She was so lost in her thoughts, she jumped guiltily when Davey touched her arm and brought her back to the ballgame. By the time the game was over, all of them were tired and hoarse from cheering, but they were overjoyed by the team's victory. It was especially sweet, Cindy explained, because they beat their old rivals, the Cowboys, by two touchdowns. Dave played brilliantly again, and the rest of the team had followed his example. The cheering crowd had filed out by the time Cindy, Billy, Davey, and Joan headed down the tunnel towards the dressing room. This time there were no reporters hanging around. Joan breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the hallway was empty.

After waiting a few more minutes, Lyle and Dave stepped into the hallway. Little Davey broke away and tackled his dad. Lyle scooped him up and gave him a big hug and kiss.

"If you keep tackling that well, Davey, pretty soon you'll be playing on the team with us," Dave said.

When Davey pounced on him, he carried him on his shoulders up to where the two women stood waiting. Lyle put his arm around Cindy and gave her a hug. Dave looked at Joan in the dim light of the tunnel area and smiled. It looked like there were tears in her eyes, but he wasn't sure.

She carried the white florist box and smiled shyly at him. When he approached, Joan murmured, "Thanks for the beautiful flowers. I don't know which are more beautiful: the red ones last week or the yellow ones this time."

"You're welcome. Did you know the color of the rose is supposed to express different things? I'm not sure exactly what they are saying, but I'm happy you like them. Thanks for agreeing to talk to me. I really appreciate it," he added quietly.

He handed Davey over to Lyle, and the six of them walked out of the tunnel together toward the team parking area. The traffic had pretty well dissipated by the time they got to their respective cars.

"Call me tomorrow, Joan. I'd like to meet you and go shopping sometime. I like the sweater you have on. Maybe you could help me find something like that for me," Cindy called.

"I'll call you after I get off work. Congratulations on the great game, Lyle," she paused, "and Dave. I don't want you to feel left out, Dave." she added with a teasing smile. Dave looked at her with a puzzled look, and then he laughed as he remembered his complaint the night before.

Dave and Joan were just getting into Dave's car, when Cindy, Lyle, and the boys drove past. Lyle honked and Cindy and Davey both waved until they turned the corner out of the parking lot.

Once they were alone, Joan began feeling a little uneasy. Dave opened the car door for Joan and waited while she slid across the seat. Joan realized her nervousness wasn't because she didn't trust Dave; it was because of the way her body reacted each time they were alone. She was scared because he had aroused longings and feelings in her she thought were long dead. He was a gentleman, but she wasn't sure if she could trust her own treacherous body.

As if he could sense her uneasiness, Dave drove silently out of the parking area. For a few minutes, he concentrated on the remaining traffic. When he turned onto the freeway, he glanced at her and said softly, "Thanks again for coming. I was afraid you might not be free tonight," he added.

"I must admit you have aroused my curiosity. I didn't have any plans for tonight, except work on my bike path article. It is almost finished, but I have to turn it in by Tuesday." she added.

"I am too keyed up before a game to eat much. Right now, I'm starving. I hope you don't mind if we talk over dinner." Dave said.

"No, that sounds fine to me, but won't you give me a hint of what the problem is about?" Joan asked.

"Not until after we eat. I need a little time to relax from the excitement and tension of the game. Just be patient, I'll fill you in soon. Don't worry, it isn't anything earthshaking, but it is something I need your help with."

After driving about 20 minutes, Dave turned onto the Pacific Coast Highway heading towards Ventura. The sun was low in the sky, and the clouds drifted just above the horizon. Joan divided her attention between the things along the highway and the sky. She stole furtive glances at Dave's profile as he drove along, but she quickly looked away because of the feelings his appearance aroused in her. Each time they approached a restaurant, Joan expected to feel Dave apply the brakes and turn into the parking lot. She looked at him in surprise when he turned right onto a private driveway.

Dave said, "I thought we would have dinner at my place. I hope you don't mind, but I do want to talk about something important and private."

Joan stammered, "I guess it's all right, but wouldn't it be easier to eat at a restaurant?"

"No," he answered, "my housekeeper is a wonderful cook. She's staying late today to fix our dinner. It won't be anything fancy, but I can guarantee it will be delicious. She makes it hard for me to maintain my weight, but I love the temptation."

Joan drew in a quick breath when they pulled up in front of a huge ranch style house. There was a lush lawn surrounded by tall Oleander bushes, while ferns filled in the courtyard leading up to the front door. As he opened the front door and Joan stepped inside, the first thing she noticed was the massive leather sofa and chairs clustered around a huge natural stone fireplace. Bookshelves filled up one wall. Even without feeling the warmth of the flames, Joan was struck by the cozy feeling of the room. Considering the spaciousness of the room, Joan was surprised at how homey and welcoming the place felt.

When her gaze continued around the room, she noticed the other wall was nearly all windows. Outside she caught a glimpse of the ocean in the distance. She wandered over to the window and looked out. "What a marvelous view!" she exclaimed.

Dave walked over beside her. "That's the main reason I bought this house. I find it very relaxing to sit outside. You really can't appreciate the view from here. Come on; let me give you a tour of my favorite spot."

Dave opened the glass door and led her outside. The sun had started slipping down below the horizon. The clouds were changing into brilliant streaks of orange and red stretching across the sky. The sky itself was a warm golden color that gradually changed to a pale blue. As she stood on the deck, leaning against the terrace railing, silence settled around them like a cozy cocoon. Dave walked up behind her and put his arm loosely around her body. He pulled her gently back against him. Joan relaxed and leaned back feeling the strength of his body sheltering hers. They stood silently as they watched nature put on its spectacular light show. As the sun slowly sank out of sight, the vivid colors drained away, and the sky began darkening as night approached. They lingered in companionable silence. Joan turned and slipped her arm round his waist and leaned her head against his shoulder. All tension seemed to have eased out of them as the sun slowly set. Joan became aware that it was now being replaced by a different kind of tension.

At the sound of a woman's voice, both of them stepped apart. Turning towards the door, they saw a short red-haired woman in a colorful dress standing watching them.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you, Dave. I just wanted to ask when you want dinner served. It's ready now, if you want it, but it will keep for a while if you want to wait," she announced.

"I think we are ready now. Is that all right with you, Joan?" Dave asked.

"Fine. I shouldn't be hungry, but I am. After all, you did all the work today. I just watched the game," Joan laughed.

"Joan, I'd like you to meet Mrs. Jensen. She's been my housekeeper, cook, substitute mother, and loyal fan since I moved to Malibu. If this house looks good, it's all her doing. She does a marvelous job, and I couldn't get along without her," Dave declared.

"Now, Dave, stop your blarney or you'll make me blush," Mrs. Jensen chided.

"Mrs. Jensen, this is Joan Marshall, the woman I told you about who saved my life the other night," Dave said.

"I can't tell you how thankful I am that you were there. Dave is like a son to me. He's quite a guy. I don't know what we would have done without him around. What he does on the football field is remarkable, but few people know what a special young man he is off the field. I'm so happy to meet you in person. Dave's told me how talented and beautiful you are, but I thought maybe he was exaggerating. It looks to me like he was just being truthful," Mrs. Jensen added quickly.

"Thanks for everything. I'm happy to meet you, too. I hope you didn't go to any trouble fixing dinner for us," Joan said as she shook Mrs. Jensen's hand.

"Don't think anything about that. I like to cook and Dave loves to eat, so we get along very well. I didn't mind staying a little later tonight. That was quite a game you played today, Dave. I don't think I've ever seen you play better than you have the last two weeks. If you're ready to eat, why don't you go sit down at the table? It's all set. When you are seated, I'll serve the food."

Dave escorted Joan to the table just inside the dining room overlooking the southern end of the terrace. He pulled her chair out and seated her before going around to sit across from her. Mrs. Jensen served a small seafood salad and poured a glass of wine for each of them. After they finished the salad, she brought in two sizzling steaks. Each plate also contained a baked potato, green beans with slivered almonds, and fresh homemade dinner rolls. As they ate, they talked about the game and about Lyle, Cindy, and the boys. Dave recounted stories about their days together in college. Joan listened intently as she ate. The food was excellent, and it seemed so natural and comfortable sitting at the table with Dave. Mrs. Jensen removed the plates and brought in slices of homemade cheesecake and hot coffee. Joan groaned as she looked at the delicious looking dessert.

"You said this would be a simple meal, but this is a feast. That cheesecake looks delicious and is a favorite of mine, but I am stuffed. I can't eat another mouthful," Joan moaned.

"I'll just leave it here. If you get hungry later, you might enjoy having it then." she suggested

"That sounds like a good plan," Dave added. "This meal was another culinary masterpiece, Mrs. Jensen."

Mrs. Jensen flushed at his words of praise. She gathered up the dishes and disappeared back into the kitchen. Joan could hear her bustling around. After a few minutes, she came out with her purse on her arm. "Well, Dave, everything is cleaned up. I'll see you tomorrow. Just leave the other dishes, and I'll wash them when I come in the morning. It was a real pleasure meeting you, Joan; I hope to see you again soon. Thanks again for saving my favorite boss," she said, extending her hand to Joan. Joan squeezed her hand and repeated her praise of the dinner. They watched Mrs. Jensen walk out the front door. When the door closed, a silence momentarily settled over the room.

## Chapter 11

Dave stood up and took her hand into his, "Come over here by the fireplace so we can relax and talk. I really do have a proposition to make." Joan's eyes opened wide when she heard Dave's words.

"I'm sorry that was a poor choice of words. I don't mean a 'proposition.' I want to propose a business arrangement. That doesn't sound much better. Well, let me stop stammering and tell you what I have in mind," he finally said.

"Thanks. I admit I'm more curious now than I was before I came," Joan admitted with a laugh. "Why don't you just start at the beginning," she suggested as she sat down on the huge brown leather sofa. Although they weren't actually touching at all, Joan was very aware of the closeness of Dave's body.

He slowly began talking. At first, the words came slowly in short bursts, but after a few minutes, he relaxed and his speech came more naturally. He looked at her and said, "It may surprise you, Joan, but the worst thing about playing pro football isn't being tackled, or the hard physical work, or the fear of getting hurt. What I hate the most is being hounded by some of these publicity hungry journalists from the national magazines. Most of the reporters are all right, but some of them don't really care what they write or even if it's true. I had a couple of brushes with them when I was playing college football. They took things I said and twisted them around until I couldn't even recognize my own ideas. Since then I have purposely avoided newsman and the lies they spread. I'm basically a small town boy. I don't mind what they write about my playing. I've been kicked around in the press for some bad calls, but that's the football game. What I resent are the nosey ones who try to pry into my private life. My private life is no one's business, but my own. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get up on a soapbox, but that's a touchy subject for me."

"I can totally understand your feelings about this. Some reporters do terrible damage when they pry into a person's life. I know personally that horrible things can happen when they do that," Joan added angrily.

"I'm glad you understand how I feel. It makes the rest so much easier. To get rid of the reporters after last week's game, I promised to give an interview. At the interview, I kept a closed mouth, so to speak, about my life off the field. One of the reporters kept asking prying questions. I finally told him point blank that it was none of his business what I did off the field. He said something that really got to me. He warned me that the public is curious, and if I didn't cooperate and give them the stories, sooner or later, someone is going to come along and fill in the details from their imagination. They could make a lot of money by creating stories about me, because of the public's curiosity. To be truthful that thought scares the hell out of me."

"That was a terrible thing for him to say, but I'm afraid he might be right. Some tabloids deal more in sensationalism than in truth. Even if they know it isn't true, they frequently publish it just to sell magazines. They know most people don't have the time, the money, or the stomach to sue them and fight them in court. Because of that, a few get away with murder, but the saddest thing is that the public buys the filth and often believes it," Joan muttered. "But what does all this have to do with me?"

"I was just getting to that part. If I have to surrender some of my privacy or risk that kind of 'created reality,' I'd like to head them off. I know you understand how I feel about this. I'd like you to be the person to write my article. I trust your judgment, and I am really impressed with what I read in your notebook and articles. It doesn't have to be a long, serious piece. I just don't want some stranger coming in and prying and exploiting me without a chance to even know what he's written before it is published. Will you do it? I really do need your help," Dave said.

Joan sat in stunned silence at the idea he had proposed. It was out of the question, especially the way she was beginning to feel about him, but how could she explain it without revealing her feelings.

"I can't do it, Dave. That isn't the kind of writing I usually do. I have my job at the auto parts store and the articles I'm working on for Sunset Magazine. If you look around, you can find someone who knows a lot more about football than I do. This is too big an assignment for me. I'm not good enough to write something that important," she stammered.

"Let me be the judge of that. I'm not looking for a Pulitzer Prize winning article; I just want someone who will be honest and fair, someone I can trust with my life and my privacy. I can't think of anyone else in the world I trust more than you. I need you to do this for me. As for the other things, they can be worked out. It wouldn't take that much time to do the research. There isn't any huge rush to get it published, but I would like to get started on it as soon as you can arrange your schedule. Please, Joan, please do this for me," Dave pleaded.

"I don't know, Dave. I have to work. My job is important to me. I need it to survive financially. I don't see how I can work this project in the little time I have free," she explained.

"Is worrying about your current job the main reason you're hesitating? If that can be worked out, will you do it?" Dave asked quickly.

"I guess it is," she answered.

"Joan, this is a business deal. I will pay you well for writing the article," he added quickly. "Would you consider writing it for $5000 plus expenses?"

Joan's mouth fell open at the size of the amount he mentioned. She gathered her thoughts. Her hands were trembling, because his offer was so much higher than anything she'd ever dreamed of making.

Before she had time to answer, he added, "I really don't care about the money. The peace of mind and relief it would give me would be worth much more than that. The only thing I ask is that I have the right to read the article and have approval rights before you submit it to a magazine for publication. I'm not bragging, but I think you will get a lot of money by selling it to one of the sports or people magazines. They are always calling me wanting to do a story on me. I will give you exclusive rights to the article. It could bring in a lot more money for you. I think you might even be able to sell different versions to different magazines. If that isn't enough money, tell me what else I need to offer to get you to say yes."

"Dave, it isn't the money. That's more money than I ever dreamed of making on an article. Why would you pay so much to have me do it, when you can get someone else to do it for free?" she asked.

"I realize that, but I want someone I know and trust and can really rely on to be honest. I want you to write it for me. I trust you completely to be honest and fair. I don't want you to make me into a superhuman being. I want an honest story that will protect my privacy and not be some sensational pack of lies. All I ask is that you help me protect my privacy." he asked, taking her hands into his. "Please do this for me."

"It's very tempting. The money would really help out, but I still don't know about my job or whether I am even qualified to do this kind of writing," Joan replied.

"Let me worry about both problems. If it can be arranged so it doesn't affect your job, will you do it?' he asked.

"Well. That's a very big 'if', but if it could be worked out, yes, I'll try to write your article for you. I don't know if it will be good enough, but I'll do the best job that I can. But let's make this clear; this is strictly business," she added seriously.

"Yes, I promise this is a business deal, but that doesn't mean we can't also be friends, does it?" Dave asked.

"No, I think we can still be friends," she answered.

"That's wonderful!" he whooped. "Come on. Let's get started."

"What? Right now?" she asked.

"Sure, there's no time like the present," he crowed. He grabbed her, pulled her up into his arms, swung her around in a circle. "I think I have something that will help you a lot to get to know me better. It's down the hall," he said as he led her down the long hallway. He opened the last door on the right and guided her inside. Joan felt panic rising as she stared straight at one of the largest beds she had ever seen. She tensed up, but he led her past the bed to a desk and bookcase near the window. Joan blushed when she realized he didn't have any ulterior motives. She hoped he hadn't even noticed. If he noticed anything, he didn't mention it.

"Sometimes when I have a really bad day and my ego is as bruised as my body, I come in here and look at this book. I almost had to steal it to get it away from my mom," he chuckled, as he handed her a worn looking scrapbook. "It goes all the way back to when I first started playing football. Looking at it makes me realize how many people sacrificed and helped me get to where I am now. When I am down, it gives me the courage to keep on trying. Some people say I had it too easy, and in some ways I did, but I always practiced hard and I've always tried to do my best."

"You don't have to convince me, Dave, but I do want to look at the evidence myself," she added with a laugh.

"I like the way you laugh. It's such a beautiful sound, but then it matches the rest of you. You are a very beautiful woman. Has anyone told you that lately?" he asked.

Joan blushed, "That doesn't sound like a business question," she chided. "Is there anything else you'd like to show me now?"

"That doesn't sound much like a business question to me either, especially considering where we're standing," he quipped.

Joan looked around at the bedroom furniture, and Dave laughed as he watched a deep red blush creep up her neck. "Please forgive me. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that, but you gave me such a perfect opening line. There are lots of things I'd like to show you in here, but I promised that this would be strictly business. One thing you will learn about me is that once I make a promise, I keep it. You look so beautiful and so sexy, I think we'd better move back to the living room before you make a liar out of me," he added with a soft laugh.

He gave her a quick hug and a gentle kiss on the forehead, before he led her out of the bedroom. He quickly showed her the rest of the house. Joan was impressed with the obvious sense of style in each room. They were all comfortable and homey, but still stylish.

Dave led her back to the dining room and put the scrapbook on the table. After pointing out a few highlights in his career and a few pictures of his family, he handed her the scrapbook. "My mother would scalp me if she knew I let this out of my hands, but I want you to take it home and study it at your leisure. Just don't believe all the things you read in it. Many of these writers make me sound too good to be true. I'd love to have you stay longer, but I know you have to go to work tomorrow. Would you like me to take you home now?"

"I didn't realize it was that late! Thanks for dinner and for trusting me to do this article. Time just flew by. You are right, I'd better get home in a hurry or I'll be sound asleep at my desk tomorrow," she exclaimed.

"How can I get in touch with you?" he asked.

"Let me give you my number at work and at home. I'll look over all of this information and try to get a tentative plan for the article. Please think about it, too, and let me know what kind of things you want in your article and what things you want left out. In the meantime, you can gather together the rest of the material you want me to study," she suggested.

"Well, that may be a bit of a problem, because some of it is not here. Some sources and places are back near my home near Orlando, Florida, and in Seattle, Washington. We may have to travel there to get the rest of the information," he added. "Is there anyone besides your boss that you need to clear things with before you could take off for a few days?"

Dave waited anxiously as he watched Joan's face. To his surprise, she didn't even hesitate before answering, "No, there isn't anyone else."

As they drove back to 'her apartment', Dave asked for directions again, hoping she would lead him to where she really lived. He blamed it on his poor sense of directions when coming from a different location.

Joan kidded, "You'd better be careful. You might not be able to find your way back to your house."

Dave silenced her when he answered, "That won't bother me. If I have trouble, I'll just go back and sleep on your couch."

At her stricken look, Dave laughed, "Don't be so worried! I was just kidding."

Joan laughed weakly. When Dave pulled up in front of the apartment building, she dashed out before Dave turned his car off.

"Don't bother to see me to my apartment. It is very late, and I need to get to bed. Thanks for another wonderful evening. I'll call you when I finish looking at the scrapbook and have a tentative plan for the article. Don't worry; I'll take good care of your scrapbook. I'd hate to have your mother scalp you. You have such thick, shiny hair." With a laugh, she turned and hurried into the building. She ducked out of sight and waited until his car pulled away from the curb before calling a taxi to pick her up.

## Chapter 12

As he drove home, he swore angrily as he realized he wasn't any closer to finding out what was going on with her. She seemed too honest to be hiding a live-in boyfriend, but why else would she lie about where she lived. Nothing makes sense. She seems so truthful, so open, but she is hiding something important. He swore angrily as he realized that as long as she kept George a secret, he couldn't trust her or tell her how he felt about her. He knew it took every ounce of his strength to keep from kissing her until she let him make love to her. He felt instinctively that if she were involved with George and it was a serious relationship that making a move too quickly would scare her away. As much as he hated the waiting, he decided it was the only way to go for now. "I don't understand. I gave her a perfect opening to tell me about George when I asked her if she needed to tell anyone else before she left on a business trip. Why didn't she tell me? Is it possible she's not as honest and real as she seems? She is a beautiful mystery that I'm going to solve or die trying," he vowed.

The sound of the telephone startled her out of her state of drowsiness and brought her back to the present. It was nearly 10:30 p.m., Tuesday evening, when she realized she had dozed off while studying the clippings in Dave's scrapbook. It wasn't because she found the contents boring. It was the extra-long hours she had been putting in at work over the last two weeks had finally caught up to her. They had been working a lot of overtime trying to finish the yearly inventory. In the evenings, she had stayed up late getting the Sunset Magazine article ready to be submitted. She had turned it in on Monday, so she was beginning to work on researching the article about Dave.

Joan shook herself awake and grabbed for the receiver.

"Hello," she answered.

"Joan, I hope I didn't wake you or disturb you. This is Cindy. Did you watch the TV news tonight?" Cindy asked.

"No, I didn't have the TV on at all tonight. What's the matter?" she asked.

"Then you haven't heard anything about Dave's accident? Good. Hopefully, it's not as serious as they made it sound. I was afraid you might have heard it and been upset by it," Cindy said.

"Tell me what happened," Joan asked quickly.

"They were practicing this afternoon. It was just a routine scrimmage, but something went wrong. One of the linemen ran into Dave. When Dave fell, Alonzo was knocked back on top of him. Apparently his passing arm was trapped behind his back. He couldn't move it and he was in extreme pain, so they rushed him to the emergency room. The doctor said it looks like a shoulder separation. They took x-rays, gave him some pain medication, and sent him home. "

"What does that mean, Cindy? Is it serious?" Joan asked.

"It depends on a lot of factors. He's been put on the injured list. He can't practice or play for at least a week. At the end of that time, the doctors will recheck it to see if it has healed enough to let him play. This is his first injury as a pro. After all the playing he's done, that is remarkable, but I know he is going to be pretty upset. I thought you might want to know. He'd probably appreciate hearing your voice. You might be able to cheer him up. I know how much he likes playing football, so I imagine he is pretty down tonight."

"Have you talked to him since it happened?" Joan asked.

"Yes, Lyle and I were over at his house earlier this evening. He told us about the article you are writing about him. I think he could use some TLC," Cindy added.

"I don't know, Cindy. I feel strange calling him," Joan stammered, "after all, we only met recently and are just friends."

"Come on, Joan. I know you really like him, and I know he likes you. Isn't making a phone call the kind of thing a person would do for a friend?" Cindy asked.

"Of course, you're right. Do you think it is too late to call him?"

"No, he was pretty wound up when we left a while ago. I think he'd like someone to talk to. I just thought I'd pass the information along. It is up to you to decide if you care enough about him as a friend, of course, to call," she added.

"Thanks for letting me know. I'll try to call him."

"Do you have his private number?" Cindy asked.

"Yes, he gave it to me Sunday. I was supposed to call him when I had time to look over some of the material he gave me to study. That would be a good reason to call. I'll let you know what happens," she said as she hung up the receiver.

Joan looked at the phone for a few moments as she organized her thoughts before dialing Dave's number. After about seven rings, he answered.

"Hello, Dave, it's Joan. Cindy just called and told me about your shoulder. How are you doing?" she asked.

"Joan, it's so good to hear your voice. I'm OK, I guess. They gave me a shot at the hospital, so I don't really feel any pain now, but emotionally I'm feeling rotten. We've been doing so well all season and have a good chance to be in the playoffs. I feel like I'm letting the team down. I'm going to go stir crazy here during this week knowing I should be there practicing with the team. We only have five more games before the season ends and we're only one game behind the 49ers," he griped.

"Dave, it was just a freak accident. You didn't do anything wrong to disappoint anyone. It wasn't your fault. Cindy said it isn't a serious injury. Was she wrong? Is it that bad?" Joan asked.

"It can be serious, but, since it is the first time I've injured it, there is a good chance it will heal without surgery. I'm just feeling frustrated and angry. I didn't mean to complain or snap at you," he apologized softly.

"Don't worry about that, Dave. I know you really love playing football and doing your best is very important to you. Just follow the doctor's orders and take care of yourself. Just try to consider this an unplanned vacation. If you are careful, Cindy said, you'll probably be back at practice next week. It must be hard sitting on the sidelines when you are usually out in the middle of the action," Joan sympathized.

"I don't know, Joan. I've never been on the sidelines that much. I don't think I'm going to like it at all. I'm not a very patient person. I really do appreciate you calling me tonight. I needed someone I could trust to talk to. You don't know how much it means to me having a friend like you. I'd ask you to come over and see me, but it's pretty late and I know you have to work tomorrow. I'll let you go for now, but I'll be talking to you soon. Sleep well, Joan," he whispered.

"Good night, Dave, get some sleep. I'm sure you'll be all right soon,"she replied.

When Joan returned to her desk after lunch, she found a note to call Dave as soon as possible. She slipped her purse in the desk drawer and quickly dialed his number.

"Hello," he answered on the second ring.

"Hi, this is Joan. I got a message to call you as soon as possible. Is anything wrong?" she asked quickly.

"No, Joan, thanks to you, everything is all right today. Well, my shoulder is still sore, but I decided to take your suggestion and consider this an unplanned vacation, but I decided to combine it with some business," he remarked, "but, I can't do it without you. Do you think you could get away for the rest of the week? This would be the perfect time to go do some quality research for the article. It would also keep me from going stir crazy!"

"I don't know what to say. There's no way I can get off work right now. We are still working on the yearly inventory. There's so much work still to do here. I'm afraid it is impossible," she stammered.

"How do you know until you ask? If you can get the time off from work without causing you problems with your boss, would you go?" he asked persistently.

"There's just no way that could happen," she argued.

"But, if it could be arranged, would you?" he repeated.

"Yes, but," she protested.

"Don't worry. I'll take care of everything. I'll talk to you later," he said as he hung up the phone. Joan shook her head as she thought about all the work left to complete on the inventory and end of the fiscal year reports. "I don't think it would be safe for me to be alone on a trip with him, either," she sighed.

Joan sat and looked at the phone. "Why did I say I'd go with him?" She asked herself. "I thought it was a safe answer since we are so busy right now. There's no way I could get off work to go on a trip with him! Besides, I've got too many feeling for him right now; the less time I am around him, the safer my emotions will be."

About twenty minutes later, Mr. White called Joan into his office. He closed the door behind her after she was seated. He looked flustered and upset.

"Why didn't you tell me you know Dave Allen? He's the best thing that's happened to the Rams in 30 years! He just called me. You could have knocked me over with a feather! Imagine that. He said you're writing an article about him for "Sports Illustrated". Why didn't you tell me about the research problem? We have the inventory nearly finished. Besides, if we don't get it done this week, we can always finish it next Monday. I told him it was fine for you to take the rest of the week off. Can you believe it! Dave Allen talked to me! He's sending me tickets for the next two home games. I can hardly wait to tell my stuck up brother-in-law. He thinks he's such a big shot. He'll turn green with envy when he hears it," he smirked. "Dave said he'd call you as soon as he got the reservations made to let you know when and where to meet him."

Joan stumbled back to her desk in a daze. As she sank into her chair, the phone rang. "Hello," she mumbled.

"Go home and pack your bags, Joan," Dave laughed smugly. "We leave from LAX at 7:30, but you need to be there by 6:30 to get your boarding passes.

"I can't just pick up and leave on a minutes' notice," she sputtered.

"Why not? Is there someone else you have to check things with?" he asked quickly. "Your boss said there was no problem giving you the week off. You said you'd go if you could get the time off work. Besides, I'm giving you about 5 hours' notice, not a few minutes. Are you backing out on your promise?" he asked seriously.

"This is moving too fast, Dave. Where are we going? How long will we be gone? My head is spinning," Joan sputtered.

"Don't worry. I've taken care of all the details. We are going to the Tampa Bay area first for a few days, and then we'll make a stop at Seattle on our way back. Take whatever you think you might need. If you need anything extra, there are plenty of stores in both places. We'll get anything else we need there. I'll give you $3000.00 advance on the article. That should take care of anything you need to cover here. Besides, I'm paying for all your travel expenses. Don't you think you'd better hurry home and start packing?" he asked with a chuckle.

"Do you always move this quickly?" she asked.

"Only when I need to. I'll pick you up at your apartment at 6:00. That should give us plenty of time to get to the airport," he added.

"No, that's out of your way. I'll catch the airport shuttle and meet you at the terminal. Just tell me where and when and I'll meet you there," she said as she frantically wrote down the terminal and flight numbers and times. Joan felt her head spinning as she grabbed her purse, covered her typewriter, and gave her stack of inventory sheets to her boss.

"Have a good trip. I want to hear all about it when you come back," he said.

Joan rushed to her apartment and began packing for the trip. She wasn't sure what she "needed," but she didn't have that many clothes. She packed what she could. She didn't have anything fancy, but she figured she probably wouldn't need it. She made it to the airport shuttle with ten minutes to spare. When she walked into the terminal, she checked in her luggage and walked quickly to the terminal waiting area. When she arrived at the gate, an airline hostess escorted her to the VIP lounge. Dave was pacing up and down inside watching for her.

"I was afraid you might not show up. I know I acted like a steam roller out of control. I'm sorry about that, but this is the perfect time to work on this article," he said as he reached for her hand.

Her hand trembled at his touch, but he held it firmly in his. "I said I'd be here. Like you, I keep my promises. My problem is I didn't think there was any way you could keep yours about arranging for my time off from work. Next time, I'll be more careful before I make any promises," Joan said grudgingly.

Dave laughed and gave her a quick hug. "Well, I guess you can put one fact in your article. You can tell people that I am a 'take charge' kind of person."

Joan laughed with him. "That's an understatement, if I ever heard one."

Once on board the airplane, Joan noticed the envious glances of all the stewardesses when they saw Dave sitting beside her. Joan looked around curiously. She had only flown on an airplane once before, although she hated admitting her lack of travel experience. Dave noticed her uneasiness and took her hand in his as the plane began taxiing down the runway. She squeezed his hand when she heard the engines revving up for takeoff.

"Don't worry. I've flown hundreds of time. It takes some getting used to, but everything is going normally. Relax. Try to think of something pleasant. I've heard that kissing is a great way to get over nervousness of flying," he teased.

Joan laughed and said, "I doubt that's true, but I'm sure that blonde stewardess would be willing to experiment with you to see if it really works."

Dave raised his eyebrow and chuckled. "That experiment is only for passengers, like the beautiful woman I'm travelling with."

Joan blushed and clutched his hand. By the time they had taken off and reached their flying altitude, Joan released her grip on Dave's hand. "I'm sorry; I've rarely been in an airplane before. I hope I didn't hurt your hand," she apologized.

"Don't worry about it. Anytime you feel like grabbing my hand (or anything else), please do," he answered with an easy smile.

Instinctively, Joan grabbed Dave's hands when the plane began its steep descent into the Orlando Airport. When they left the plane, he kept his hand protectively on her elbow as he guided her through the terminal to retrieve their luggage and find their rental car. It was parked at the curb waiting for them. He helped her in, deposited their luggage in the trunk, and climbed in beside her. "Now for the most dangerous part of the journey," he said solemnly.

"What's that?" Joan asked anxiously.

"Getting out of the airport terminal traffic in one piece and finding our hotel. I always get turned around down here. You'd think after all the times I've flown in here, I'd get it straight. It just seems like every year or so, they start more construction and I'm lost all over again."

Joan laughed and felt some of the flight tension easing out of her body. "At least, now I'll be able to see what hits us or what you hit. And, it isn't as far down to the ground either," she said with a giggle.

## Chapter 13

The Grand Courtyard Suite Hotel was only a couple of miles from the airport, and, despite all the kidding around, Dave maneuvered the car to the hotel lobby without any mishaps. The doorman handed their luggage to the bell captain and had the valet park their car. Dave led Joan into the luxurious lobby. At the desk, he signed the resister and picked up their room key. Joan stood by silent, feeling more nervous and uncomfortable as time passed.

There was only one room key—only one room. In the elevator heading for the sixteenth floor, Joan kept her eyes on the carpet and was silent. The bell boy carried their luggage and the door key. He unlocked the door and walked inside. He deposited the two suitcases side by side near the window. He opened the curtains, pointed out the location of the wet bar and the bathroom. When Joan looked around, she noticed a large spa. He showed them the location of the controls and asked if there was anything else they needed. Dave gave him a tip, and then he turned and left them alone.

Once alone, Dave gingerly pulled off his jacket. He laid it over the back of one of the chairs in the living room.

"Let me put your suitcase in your bedroom. Do you have any preference? Which one do you want?" he asked as he opened the two doors that lead off from the living area.

"Either one will do," she stammered, blushing deeply.

Dave noticed her discomfort. "Joan, I'm sorry if you misunderstood. I promised you this assignment and trip would be strictly business. I thought you understood that we have a suite of rooms," he apologized. "I wouldn't take advantage of you like that. I care too much about you. Don't worry. You can trust me."

"I feel so stupid, Dave. I saw you get only one key. I've never stayed in many hotels, and never in one like this," she mumbled.

"Joan, it is so refreshing to meet someone who still is sweet and innocent enough to blush and has such high moral values. Don't apologize or be embarrassed about it," he said giving her a friendly hug.

After settling in, Dave ordered a late supper and a bottle of wine. They sat across from each other and talked about the flight and the Orlando area. Dave told her that he had grown up in a small town nearby and that his parents still lived in the same house. He talked freely about his family and his childhood.

Joan got up and grabbed her notebook. "How stupid of me, I've just been sitting here listening to all of this, and I forgot all about taking notes for the article. I was just so interested hearing what you were saying."

"Don't worry about it. Most of this is stuff I'd rather share just with you. Some of it might help you understand who I am and how I think and feel. It isn't necessarily for the article, but I'll leave all of that up to you. If there is anything you want to know about me, please feel free to ask. I promise to tell you the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."

After they had finished eating, Dave asked, "Did you bring a bathing suit?"

"Yes, I did," she answered.

"Great, go put it on and join me in the spa. That will really help my shoulder relax before going to bed. Have you ever tried a spa before?" he asked.

"No, I've seen pictures of them in movies and TV, but I've never been in one," she answered.

"Well, you're in for a real treat. Come on. I promise not to bite," he said as he headed into his bedroom to put on his trunks.

In her room, Joan pulled off her clothes and stepped into her bathing suit. It was an old blue and white floral one piece, but she had not worn it very much, so it still looked almost new. It was a conservative suit, but she felt self-conscious as she thought of sitting in the giant spa with Dave. She nearly chickened out, but was afraid to admit her fears. She was more afraid of her own desires flaring out of control than she was of Dave. He had promised it was strictly business, and she knew he would keep his promise. Besides, except for a couple of hugs, nothing had happened between them. Slowly, she walked across the room to the spa.

Dave looked up with a big smile when she walked in. He was already submerged in the waters that bubbled and swirled around his body. Only the top of his shoulders and his head were above water.

"I beat you," he gloated. "Come on in, the water feels great." Joan slipped off her robe and let it fall to the floor. She took the hand rail and stepped down into the water. Its warmth bubbled over her feet. She took another step and then another until she was standing in the middle. Dave reached out, took her hand and guided her into one of the seats across from him.

"Each seat along the edge is at a different depth and angle. Keep moving along and trying them until you find the one that feels best to you. That's half the fun of getting into a big spa like this one." After saying that, he shifted into another seat.

"Oh, wow," Joan sighed, "this feels wonderful. I didn't know the water would be so warm or that the bubbles would tickle."

Dave laughed and moved one seat closer. As soon as he moved, Joan slid down one seat away from him. That only made Dave laugh harder.

"I'm not really chasing you, although that does sound like a fun game. I think I've found the seat I like the best. This top jet is doing fantastic things to my shoulder. Sit back and relax. It isn't safe to stay in one of these too long, especially one this hot after having a glass of wine. These things are really relaxing, but they can sneak up on you if you aren't careful. The secret is knowing when to get out—somewhere between mellow and unconscious," he teased.

After 15 minutes, Dave moved his shoulder. "It feels a lot better, but it's still very sore when I move it. I think I've had enough for tonight. We'd better get out while we still have the energy."

Reluctantly Joan climbed out after him. He took a large towel from the stand and gently wrapped it around her shoulders. He pulled her tenderly into his arms. Joan felt herself relaxing against his body. The warmth of the spa had eased all the tension and nervousness out of her tired body, leaving it mellow and warm. Dave's arms held her close and they leaned against each other. Dave bent down and tenderly kissed her forehead before tilting her face up and kissing her soft, pliant lips. Her lips parted at his touch and for a moment, his tongue darted inside and mingled with hers. With a deep shudder and a low moan, Dave released her and turned her around. With a playful slap on her bottom, he pushed her towards her bedroom door.

"You'd better scoot off to bed right now. It's been a long day and we have places to go and things to do tomorrow. Sleep well, my friend. I'll see you in the morning," Dave said slowly.

"Good night, Dave," Joan murmured as she quickly crossed the room to her bedroom door. Once inside, she closed the door, pulled off her wet suit, and sank limply down on the bed. Her heart was pounding and her body still tingled from the feel of the warmth of his body and the taste of his kiss.

She sat there until her legs regained their strength before slipping into her nightgown and crawling between the covers. In spite of feeling relaxed by the spa, Joan lay still for several minutes before falling asleep. Her mind kept replaying the sensations and feelings his closeness had aroused in her. Even in her dreams, Dave kept re-appearing. Each time he got close, she felt herself reaching for him, but he melted away, leaving her feeling strangely unhappy.

Joan was awakened by a soft knocking sound. As her eyes opened, she looked around quickly, for a moment disoriented. Then she heard Dave's muffled voice coming through the closed door.

"Wake up, sleepyhead. Breakfast is here and we have places to go today," he called.

Joan slowly sat up. She stretched lazily and pulled on her robe. She padded silently across the thick cream colored carpet and opened the door. Dave was already dressed in a pair of brown slacks and a maroon pullover shirt. He looked up when he heard the door open.

"Good morning, Joan. Did you sleep well?" he asked. "I'm sorry to wake you so early, but we have several things to do today."

"That's all right. I slept peacefully," she lied. "Is that coffee as good as it smells?"

"I don't know. Have some," he urged as he handed her a steaming cup of coffee. Joan sat down at the table across from him. A feast of fresh fruits and assorted sweet rolls covered the table. She helped herself to some of the fruit and a roll.

"That coffee hits the spot. Thanks," she added. "What do we have to do today?"

"First thing, you probably should get dressed. You look too cute in that little robe," Dave kidded her.

Joan blushed and laughed nervously. "No, I meant after we leave the hotel," she stammered.

"Oh," said Dave with mock innocence. "I want to give you the grand tour of where I grew up near Tampa Bay. The neighborhood has changed since I was a little boy, but I thought it might help you understand me better if you see where my early roots were. After looking around there, we are heading over to visit my family. At least, you'll get to meet my mom and dad. My sisters and brother aren't living at home now. My youngest sister Lila is in college in Alabama. My oldest sister Vicky is married to an Air Force pilot and is living in Germany with her husband and two boys. Teresa, my middle sister, is in law school in Chicago. My brother Billy is married and living in Miami. He's an investment counselor. My mom is a housewife and community activist. My dad is a semi-retired automobile dealer. He says he's retired, but he still keeps busy checking things out at his dealerships"

"That's a very impressive family. I always envied people in large families. The ones I saw while I was growing up always seemed to be having so much fun together," Joan added.

"It does have some advantages, but it has drawbacks, too," he laughed. "Can you imagine having to wait in line for the one bathroom with three sisters and a brother who were usually earlier risers than I was? That's one thing I can clearly remember from when I was young living in Tampa. When I was very young, we lived in a modest apartment building. Dad was working two jobs and mom struggled to make ends meet. I don't know how he managed, with all the kids, but he saved and made some good investments. He also tinkered with inventions. Some of them seemed silly at the time, but one of his ideas caught on. After that he invested more, and we moved out of the city into a suburban area. He'd always been interested in cars. I think the real reason he bought the car dealership is so he could have a new car every year and get to drive all the different models. Whatever the reason, he had a knack for running the dealership. He expanded his business over the years, opening three other dealerships. Now he only goes to work when he wants to, which is fairly often judging by what Mom says.

"You seem very close to them," Joan stated quietly.

"Yes, I think they're both great. Even though Dad was always very busy, he always took time to be around for us. He encouraged me to practice and he took time to throw passes with me. He went to most of my football games. He and Mom are my number one fans. I don't get home as often as I'd like, but they are still very important to me," Dave admitted.

"I'll hurry and get dressed. I'm anxious to see all these places and meet your parents," Joan said.

"Pack your suitcase, too. We'll be staying at Mom's house tonight. She's anxious to see us, too," he added.

In thirty minutes, Dave and Joan climbed into the rental car, headed out of the parking area, and pulled onto the freeway heading towards Tampa Bay. As Dave drove, Joan asked questions about all the different things she saw. Dave answered all her questions. She was excited and curious about everything. Sometimes Dave looked at her and smiled. "What's wrong?" Joan asked after noticing his expression.

"Nothing, absolutely nothing is wrong, Joan. I'm just enjoying this day more than I can remember enjoying any other day in Tampa. Have you ever been to Florida before?" he asked.

"It's strange that I write mainly travel articles, because I've never had any chance to travel. This is only the second time I've been on a vacation. When I was very small, before my father died, I think we went to Oregon, but I don't really remember it. Other than California, I've only lived in Texas. I had no idea Florida would be so green or so flat. After living in Texas and Southern California, I am almost overwhelmed by the greenness of everything," Joan replied.

"I know what you mean. I notice the greenness every time I come home, but I don't remember ever thinking about it as a kid. I guess it all depends on what you get used to," he commented.

## Chapter 14

When they approached Tampa, Dave turned the car off the freeway and headed south. After a short time, they entered the outskirts of the city. As he continued driving, the greenness of the surroundings changed to apartment buildings lining both sides of the road. There were a few trees growing along the road, but gradually even those disappeared. The buildings looked shabbier and lots of small children with a multitude of skin colors played or lounged in front of the buildings. After driving another mile, Dave turned right and pulled into the parking lot of a large gray colored complex that looked like a school. Dave stopped the car, slowly got out, and helped her slide out beside him.

"This is really where my football career began. At least, this is where people began noticing that I played well. My coach here was a remarkable man. He cared and encouraged me. He helped me gain the confidence in myself that gave me the courage and determination to keep working at it. As I practiced hard, I improved and scouts from some of the colleges came around. He helped me decide which ones were out to help me and which ones were just out to use me. Couch Thompson is a man that I really admire. I credit a lot of my success to him. He is still coaching here, and I thought we might try to see him. I'd really like to have you meet him. I have such good memories of my time playing football here, and it's all because of him," Dave enthused as he led Joan down the corridors to the practice football field. Once outside the building, he pointed across the field to a man wearing a bright green sweatshirt. He took Joan's elbow and guided her across the field to where the man was talking to a group of players. As Dave approached, an excited murmur swept over the crowd. The man turned around. When he saw Dave, he hurried over and gave him a big bear hug, which Dave returned enthusiastically.

"I'm sorry to interrupt your practice, Coach," Dave said, "but I was travelling through the area and I wanted to pay my respects. I would also like you to meet a good friend of mine, Joan Marshall. She's writing an article about me for a sports magazine, and I thought you might be able to give her some information about me as a high school player. If you're too busy, we can come back later today," Dave added

"Don't be silly! I'll make time for you. It's always great to see you," he said. "I was just going to have them do some drills. I've got an idea. While I talk to Miss Marshall, why don't you talk to the boys or run some drills. Give them a pep talk or some pointers. I think meeting you would be something they will never forget," the coach suggested.

When the coach introduced Dave, the guys all shouted, although they had recognized him when he walked across the field. Once Dave started talking, you could have heard a pin drop. Coach Thompson led Joan to the bleachers. Joan took out her notebook and began asking questions about Dave. Coach Thompson beamed when he recounted the games, plays, and things he remembered about the years when Dave played for him. He talked enthusiastically about Dave's drive, determination, honesty, sense of responsibility, and his natural leadership abilities. Joan liked the coach and took several pages of notes and comments from him.

When Joan looked up, she noticed Dave was out in the middle of the field with the players clustered around him. He'd slipped off his jacket and tossed it on the ground. While she watched, he lined them up and began tossing passes to them. By the time the bell rang and the class period was over, Joan had finished talking to the coach. She watched how Dave stopped to chat with each boy, showed him a tip and gave him a pat of encouragement and a smile.

After the players ran off the field, Joan and the coach walked over to where Dave was putting on his jacket. Joan noticed him grimace when he bent his arm to put his jacket on. She helped ease it over his arm. Suddenly, she remembered that Dave wasn't supposed to be doing any exercising or practicing. They said their goodbyes and thanks to Coach Thompson and returned to the car. Once inside the car, Joan turned and looked at Dave's face. He looked tired and was in obvious pain.

"Dave, I can see your shoulder is hurting you now. "Let me drive while you sit and rest. I really don't mind driving, and it might help ease your shoulder."

"That sounds like a great idea. I think I overdid it back there. I'm going to have to be more careful. Don't tell the trainer or the coach about that. They'd scalp me if they knew I'd been throwing passes," Dave admitted sheepishly.

"Why did you keep throwing the ball after your shoulder started hurting?" Joan asked.

"I didn't want any of the boys to feel left out. They seemed so thrilled to have a chance to play with me. I just didn't have the heart to tell them I couldn't. Besides, it just started hurting about 15 minutes before we were ready to leave. It's hard for me to admit that I'm hurt. I guess its part masculine pride and part stupidity. Or are those the same thing?" he asked with a slow smile.

Dave directed her out of the parking lot and back to the road they had driven in on. He had her continue driving about thirty minutes before turning off on a two lane road heading east. The countryside changed to deep shades of green again as she continued driving. At the next stop sign, Dave told her to turn left. About a mile down the road, he directed her into a narrow tree lined driveway that entered a deep stand of trees. As they rounded a curve, a huge white house with a full length porch stretched out in front of them. Off to the right, Joan could see a blue expanse of water. A bright red Cadillac convertible sat in front of the sidewalk leading to the porch. Joan pulled up beside the car and parked.

"Well, here we are," Dave announced. He got out of the car and walked around to open Joan's door. Before she could even get out, a tall, brown haired woman darted down the sidewalk and threw her arms around Dave. Dave wrapped his good arm around her and swung her in a circle. She shrieked and laughed as he stopped.

"Davey," she exclaimed. "Welcome home, honey. You've been away too long."

"Mom, this is Joan Marshall. Joan, this is my mother Caroline Allen," he said as he introduced them.

Dave's mother hugged Joan. "Welcome to our home, Joan. Any friend of Dave's is always welcome here. Dave tells me you're a writer and that you are going to write an article about him. I don't know how you managed that. He usually runs from publicity."

"Thanks for the warm welcome. You have a lovely home here," Joan said as she looked around.

Caroline led them to the porch. A large white table surrounded by chairs was waiting for them. In the center was an ice cold pitcher of lemonade and several glasses. Before sitting down, Caroline led Joan inside to her room. It was a spacious, sunny bedroom on the second floor. A terrace looked out over the lake.

"This is Vicky's room. I guess I should say it 'was' her room, but I just can't admit that she's gone for good. I hope you enjoy your stay. Dave says you are leaving tomorrow. I wish you could convince him to stay longer. I miss having him around. This old house seems so empty now that the kids are gone, but it has such happy memories that I don't want to move. Forgive me for rattling on. When you finish freshening up, come on down to the porch for some lemonade." she bubbled before giving Joan another quick hug and left her standing in the middle of the bedroom. A white canopy bed filled one corner of the room. White and yellow curtains, bedspread, and canopy cover added a further sense of lightness to the room. Joan washed her hands and face before going back down the long curving staircase to the front of the house. Although Joan felt awed by the size and simple elegance of the house, she was even more deeply impressed by the warmth, friendliness, and energy of Dave's mother.

When Joan emerged into the shaded area of the porch, Dave, Caroline, and a distinguished looking man were seated around the table. Dave stood up and escorted Joan to a seat between the man and himself.

"Well, Dave, you certainly weren't exaggerating," the man said with a slow smile that spread across his face as he turned to take Joan's hand in a warm handshake. "I'm delighted to meet you, Joan. My name is Richard, but most people call me Richie."

"Now, Rich, stop flirting. What will Joan think?" Caroline kidded.

They sat and sipped the refreshing glass of lemonade while they caught up on all the family news. Even though they were busy talking about family news, all three of them made an effort to include Joan in the conversation. They laughed and talked with great animation. Joan was caught up in their easy good humored company.

Dave had to explain again the nature of his shoulder injury, and he reassured his mother that it wasn't that serious. His dad seemed especially concerned with how Dave was handling the injury than the medical aspect. After talking to Dave for a while, Rich seemed satisfied that everything was all right with Dave.

After that the conversation turned to Joan and the article. All during dinner and the early part of the evening, they continued talking. They told stories about Dave and what he had been like as a boy. They glowed with pride when they talked about him. It was obvious they loved him very much. After dinner was over, they again retired to the cool porch area. They watched the lights of the houses around the lake begin to come on. Each one appeared to double as it was reflected in the shimmering water of the lake. Slowly it grew dark and the moon came out. A warm sense of peacefulness and security settled around the group on the porch.

Joan took out her notebook and jotted down things as she listened to the others talking. She was overcome with the warm closeness of Dave's family. It was almost too much for her to be around, because it was so different than her life had been. Caroline glanced over and noticed the change in Joan's expression.

"Is something wrong, Joan?" she asked quietly. "All of a sudden you seem to be sad and distant."

The men looked over at Joan. Her face was touched by the moonlight and the sadness in her eyes was clearly revealed.

"I'm all right," Joan answered too quickly.

"Now, honey, you can't fool me. I've had three girls. I can see something is hurting inside of you. Won't you tell us? Sometimes it helps sharing feelings. That's what we always do. It's all right to feel sad, but maybe we can help chase it away if you share it," she urged.

"You'd better fess up, Joan. Mom is like a bloodhound when she gets started," Dave kidded.

"There's no way you could chase it away, but I was just thinking about my childhood and family life compared to yours. I don't usually get sad like this, but I feel so much closeness and love between the three of you. It's almost like being a child standing outside a candy store. You can see everyone inside eating candy and having a party and knowing you never even had a taste and never will," Joan answered.

"I don't understand. Why does our family make you feel that way?" Caroline asked softly in the growing darkness.

"It's a long story and I don't want to bore you with it," Joan said quietly.

"Please, Joan, share some of what you are feeling and thinking," Caroline encouraged.

Slowly Joan shifted position. The moonlight cast a silvery glow on her face. "I've never had a 'family life', at least not since I was six years old. Even then, it was never a family like this. You see, my mother died shortly after I was born. My father was my only family. He was a wonderful man; at least, that is what my few memories tell me about him. He died when I was six in a freak accident, just like the one you had in the Adams Rib restaurant the night we met. Only, back then, no one who was there knew what to do to save him. That's how I knew what was happening and why I reacted so quickly, the way I did."

"What accident?" Richard asked.

"I can't believe that I didn't tell you. I guess because it happened and was over so quickly, there was no reason to call you. I was out with my offensive linemen at this restaurant. I choked on a piece of meat and would have died if Joan hadn't applied the Heimlich maneuver. Actually, according to the ambulance attendant and the doctor, I was actually dead for a while, because both my heart and breathing had stopped. Joan happened to be there and she saved my life. By the time the ambulance got there, I was beginning to breathe on my own. That's how we met," Dave explained.

Caroline's face turned white as she listened to Dave's explanation. She leaned over and hugged Joan, too overcome to say more than, "Thank God you were there!"

Rich took her hand. "We can never repay you for saving Dave's life. How did you know what to do?" he asked.

"My dad died when he choked on food and no one knew what to do to save him. After that happened, I vowed I'd never watch anyone else die that way. When I got old enough, I studied everything I could find on first aid. I learned CPR and the Heimlich maneuver. I'm not a hero. I just couldn't stand the thought of someone else dying needlessly," she said with a shuddering sigh.

"What happened after your dad died?" Caroline asked.

"I didn't have any other relatives, so I was made a ward of the court. I was too old to be placed with an adoptive family. People only wanted babies, not an unhappy, angry, frightened six year old. Over the years, I lived in 14 different foster homes. I never had a permanent home. I never felt I belonged to anyone or fit in anywhere. Seeing you and your family makes me acutely aware of what I missed. It isn't that I envy you or wish you harm, it just makes me remember the long empty years when I was growing up," Joan admitted softly.

Caroline put her arm around Joan and hugged her close. She stroked Joan's hair and crooned while tears flowed down Joan's cheeks while she silently cried. When she looked up, she saw there were tears on all the other faces around her.

I'm sorry I made you all sad," she mumbled. "That's why I don't talk about it."

"Don't be silly, Joan. We are just sharing your pain. It will pass away in time now that you have a family," Caroline added soothingly.

"I don't have a family," Joan said in confusion.

Yes you do, Joan," Rich said firmly. "For all that you have done for us, you are now and always will be a welcome part of our family. If you hadn't acted when you did, we'd never be able to see or talk to Dave again. Our house and the love we have are big enough to include you. I don't want you to ever feel alone again. From now on, this is your family, too," he added as he reached over and squeezed her hand.

"That's right," Caroline added. "This is your home now and we are proud to say you are part of our family."

For several minutes, they sat in companionable silence. The sounds of crickets and frogs added soothing background music. A cool breeze blew across the table and gently fanned Joan's hair.

Later Caroline and Rich excused themselves and headed inside. Dave and Joan lingered in the cool darkness of the porch.

"Would you like to take a short walk down to the lake?" Dave asked. "It is so beautiful at this time of night."

"That sounds good. It's getting late, but I don't feel like going in right now," she answered.

Hand in hand, they walked across the moonlit lawn until the path wandered into the trees along the shore. Dave guided her until they reached a small dock. A motor boat was tied to the dock. He helped her down into the boat, and they sat side-by-side. Gentle waves lapped against the sides of the boat making it rock slightly from side to side. Joan felt the tension and emotion of the evening draining out of her body. She sighed and relaxed against the cushions

Dave draped his arm protectively around her, and her head dropped back against his shoulder. The moon drifted behind a cloud and Joan shivered in the darkness. Dave pulled her closer and held her in a gentle embrace. He bent his head down and covered her lips with his mouth. Joan turned in his embrace and her arms slowly encircled his neck. Her lips parted at the feel of his tongue touching her lips, and she leaned against him surrendering to the feel of his warm, strong body. As the kiss deepened, Joan found herself falling deeper and deeper under Dave's spell.

A sudden flash of lightning startled them back to reality just before the rain began pouring down. They dashed up the path and collapsed out of breath on the porch swing. When Dave reached for her hand, she stiffened. Dave sensed the change in her body.

"It's getting late, Joan. We'd better get to bed. I'll walk you to your door," he added as he took her hand and led her inside and up the staircase. At the top, he guided her through the silent house to her bedroom. "I'm right across the hallway if you need anything," he whispered softly. He pulled her close and hugged her briefly before gently kissing her forehead and saying good night. He walked across the hall, turned, blew her a kiss, and went into his room.

Joan looked across at his door and felt a strange loneliness and a desire to cross the hallway and walk back into his arms. Slowly she shook herself loose from her desire and entered her room.

## Chapter 15

Once she was snuggled in the soft canopy bed, she realized with a start how close she had come to surrendering herself to him. She thought back on everything they had seen and done on the trip. It was the most wonderful, exciting time she had ever had. With a sob, she realized that, in spite of her best intentions and resolve, she had fallen in love with Dave. She knew she loved him and longed to be with him now and forever, but the fear of his reaction to her past filled her with panic. Joan knew it was too late to keep from falling in love, but she vowed to keep her guard up and not let herself get more involved. "One week, one perfect week, and then I must not see him again. If I continue seeing him, I won't have the strength to pull back. I can face living without him, but I can't face the idea of seeing the look of shock or pity in his eyes if he learns about my past. More than anything, I wish I could be part of this loving family, but that can never be," she sobbed as she cried herself into a fitful sleep.

The next morning, Joan pushed herself away from the table with a contented sigh. "That was a delicious breakfast, Mrs. Allen," she said.

"Caroline, please call me Caroline. I always feel ancient when people call me Mrs. Allen," she said with a laugh.

"All right, Caroline. Thanks again for the lovely breakfast and for the wonderful visit here at your home," Joan added.

"You're welcome, honey. I hope you will always feel that this is your home. I can't begin to thank you enough for saving Dave's life. There will always be a welcome mat out for you here. Come and visit us anytime, even if Dave can't make it. As you can see, we have lots of room for visitors and family. I hope you'll come back and see us often," Caroline said warmly.

"It's a long ways from California to here, but I want to thank you for making me feel so welcome. I loved hearing all the wonderful memories of family times you shared. I enjoyed so much hearing about Dave and his family. I don't know what, if any, will fit in the article, but I thoroughly enjoyed listening to you talk about it. It was delightful to be a part of a family, even if just for a couple of days."

Caroline pulled her into a warm embrace and kissed her happily. "You come back and see us again soon," she said.

"I hate to break up this mutual admiration society meeting, but Joan and I are going to take a walk along the lakeshore this morning. Now, don't get jealous Dave, but I asked her first," Rich teased.

"You'd better not be gone too long, Dad, or Mom and I will both come looking for you," he quipped.

Dave watched as his father and Joan walked across the lawn and entered the tree lined pathway. Rich took her arm and they disappeared into the trees. He sat silently watching where they had disappeared from view until his mother's voice interrupted his reverie.

"You'd better not let this girl get away, Davey. She is a lovely young lady. She's very pretty on the outside, but, more important, she is even more beautiful inside," Caroline chided.

"I know, Mom, she's the most interesting wonderful woman I have ever met. She is a mystery to me in many ways, but I feel like I have loved her all my life. I feel so mixed up, but it is an exciting confusion," he laughed.

"Why do you say she's a mystery? She seems like an open, honest person," she asked.

"Maybe mystery isn't the right word, but there are things she isn't being totally honest about, at least not with me. I love her, Mom, but there is someone else in her life right now and she isn't being honest about him."

"How do you know there is someone else in her life?" she asked.

"I called her apartment shortly after we first met. There was a message recorded in her voice on her answer machine that said 'George and I are both busy now and can't come to the phone, but if you leave your name and phone number, one of us will call you back when we are free.' Obviously, they are both living in the apartment. Also, she told me she wrote some articles for Sunset Magazine, but, when I looked for them in the magazine, it says they were written by George Adkinson. I've tried to leave openings for her to tell me about George, but, so far, she hasn't told me anything," Dave said angrily.

"Have you asked her about him?" she asked.

"No, but I know she is a very private person. Whenever I try to turn the conversation to her, she gets nervous and changes the subject. I don't know who this George Adkinson is to her, but I know I want to win her away from him. Right now, I think she likes me. Sometimes I feel she really cares for me a lot, but I'm afraid to ask questions. The first night we actually talked together, she told me not to ask questions so she wouldn't have to lie to me. I've never been afraid of competition, but, right now, I'm just trying to spend time with her to give her a chance to fall in love with me. I think sometimes she loves me, but maybe not enough to break up with George, yet. This article and trip is partly just to get to spend time with her," Dave admitted sheepishly.

"I saw the way she looked at you last night while we were on the porch, and the way she was concerned about your shoulder. I think she's already in love with you, Davey," Caroline encouraged him.

"Thanks, Mom. I hope you're right. I really love her and I'm doing everything I can to win her love. Of all the girls I've ever met, Joan is the only one who has ever made me feel this way," he admitted. "I think we'd better go find Dad and Joan. There's no telling what he may be saying to her."

Dave and Caroline walked down to the lake shore path and found them sitting on a log bench near their boat dock. When Rich looked up, he called out. "We were just about to head back and see if you two would like to take a ride around the lake. Joan has never been on a speed boat. Can you believe that? It's time to give her an education in boating," Rich added.

The four of them walked to the boat dock and climbed into the bright, shiny speed boat. Rich started the motor and backed out into the lake. He started moving slowly around the lake. The shoreline was punctuated with several expanses of lawns leading up to large houses. Between the houses, stands of cypress trees and dense foliage grew down to the waterline. Rich pointed out the home of a former Olympic gold medal diver and the retreat that a famous movie star had built back in the early 50's. The sun shone down on them, while a cool breeze drifted in from the nearby Atlantic Ocean. The sky was dotted with fluffy white clouds. Along the shore, Joan saw several different wading birds in the water and perched in the treetops. Rich slowed the boat and stopped for a moment. He pointed to a large log floating near the shoreline. Dave took a small fish from the stocked bait box on the boat and tossed it at the log. With a quick movement, the log snapped its jaws and captured the fish. Joan back away and bumped into Dave. He grabbed her elbow and held her steady. He felt her trembling.

"That's the way alligators hunt. They stay still until something comes close, and then they snatch it," Rich stated as they watched it resume its waiting position.

"Wow that was quick! I've never seen anything like that before. I had no idea there were alligators in this lake. I'm glad I didn't decide to get up this morning and go for a swim," she joked.

"That's all right. You would have been safe. These are all 'man-eaters' and you are definitely not a man," Rich kidded.

"He's right about that. These alligators don't usually bother people, but I wouldn't want you taking any chances," Dave said seriously. Joan leaned back against him.

"Now that you've had the scenic nature tour, it's time to show you what it's like for water skiers and racers," Rich said. He put it into gear and revved the motor. The boat roared to life and sprang forward. Joan was unprepared for the change of speed. Dave, standing beside her in the boat, grabbed her arm and steadied her to keep her from tumbling backwards. Joan leaned back against him while the wind whipped through her hair. Rich let off the gas pedal and slowed the boat. He glided into the boat dock with practiced ease.

"That was fun and exciting at the same time," Joan shouted. "Thanks for the ride."

Later that afternoon, as Dave and Joan carried their luggage down to the rental car, Rich and Caroline followed them. "Dave, are you sure you won't change your plans and stay a few more days? We don't get to see you often enough and there are so many wonderful things around this area that we could show Joan," she urged.

"Mom, the offer is tempting, but we already have reservations on a flight out tomorrow morning for Seattle. I hope we can come back soon for a longer visit, but you know how busy it is for me during football season. I'm hoping not to be home for Christmas," he laughed, "because I want us to be in the playoff games this year. We have been playing very well lately. I think that's why this injury is so frustrating. You know, I'll be back to visit as soon as I can. You can count on that," he said.

"Be sure to bring Joan with you. Come back anytime, Joan. We'd love to show you around the 'Florida tourist traps', as Dave calls them. It's funny we live close to the most popular tourist attractions in the world, but rarely go to them, unless we have visitors. I hope you'll come back and give us an excuse to go to Disneyworld, Universal Studios, and Cypress Gardens," Caroline said giving her a hug and kiss on the cheek.

"Seriously, Joan, we really meant it last night when we said you are part of this family now. We want you to feel free to come back anytime or call us if you ever need anything. Even if Dave can't make it, you are always welcome. Why not plan on coming here for Christmas? If you are here, I'll bet Dave will make more of an effort to get home for Christmas, too. Hurry back, both of you. Only next time, plan on staying longer. It was a real pleasure getting to know you Joan. Please come back again," Rich added. He pulled her into a huge bear hug and kissed her on the cheek.

Joan hugged them both just before getting into the rental car. Because Dave's shoulder was still hurting, Joan started the car and drove back down the driveway. She looked back and waved and watched them standing there by the porch with their arms intertwined until the driveway turned and they disappeared from view. When she turned back, Dave noticed there were tears in her eyes.

Dave handed her his handkerchief. "Are you all right?" he asked quietly.

"Yes," she admitted after drying her eyes. "You have a wonderful family, Dave. I can't ever remember feeling so welcome or so much a part of a family before. I doubt if you can understand how much that means to me."

"Joan, thanks for telling us about your childhood. There is so much about you that I don't know, but I'd like to know more. Hearing about that terrible time in your life, I think I can understand you better. I've never seen my parents react so warmly to anyone before. You may not believe them, but they really meant what they said. You are a member of this family right now, if you choose to be. We all love you and hope you will accept our offer," Dave said, reaching over and gently touching her face.

## Chapter 16

It was early evening when Joan pulled up in front of the Grand Courtyard Suites Hotel. They entered the lobby and repeated the check-in procedure, only this time Joan didn't panic when the desk clerk gave Dave one room key.

After going to their suite, Dave and Joan walked down to the Ambassador Room for dinner. In the background, they could hear someone playing a piano and singing. Once they were seated at a table for two, the waiter brought over two menus. They studied the choices. When they had decided, Dave ordered for them. As they waited for the meal to be served, Dave reached across and took Joan's hand in his. "I am so happy you are here with me, Joan. This has been so good for me. If I were sitting at home, alone, unable to practice, I think I would have gone crazy. This trip has meant so much to me, thanks to you," he squeezed her hand and smiled contentedly.

After the dinner was served, they talked happily. The lobster and steak were perfectly cooked, and the glass of wine relaxed them. The fire in the fireplace flickered and cast moving shadows on the tablecloth. Joan looked at Dave's face and saw him wince with pain when he picked up his water goblet.

"Have you found anything that might be good to use in the article, Joan?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Everything I've heard would be good. The problem will be deciding what to include and what to leave out. We aren't even finished with the trip, and I have enough information to almost write a book about you. You have done so much already in your career, and you've affected so many different people. It will be hard to leave anything or anyone out, but I'm hoping you will give me some ideas about what you want me to include," she said.

"I am hoping you can sort through all of the information and surprise me. I totally trust your judgment. We still have a couple of things to see in Seattle and then there are some other things to see and do when we get back to Los Angeles. What have you enjoyed the most, so far?" Dave asked.

"There have been so many high points. I loved talking to Coach Thompson and I thoroughly enjoyed visiting your parents. I have loved watching you as you relate to other people. I'm a lifelong people watcher, and you are a fascinating person to watch," Joan admitted with a slight blush.

On the way back to their room, Joan stopped and picked up a couple of things from the hotel gift shop. Dave waited for her to finish and then walked beside her to the elevator.

Once back in the hotel suite, they settled down on the large cream colored sofa. Joan noticed Dave wincing again as he began to remove his jacket. She leaned over and gently helped pull the left sleeve off and then slid the right one off his injured arm. "Dave, I'm afraid this trip is too hard on your shoulder. Between the driving, flying, and things you've done, I can see you are in pain. Do you need a pain pill?"

"I hate taking medicine. I should be able to get along without it," he said.

"Let me help you take off your shirt. I want to see if your shoulder looks swollen or bruised," she said.

Joan moved over and helped him unbutton his shirt and then carefully slid it off his body. She next gently removed his undershirt. She stood behind him and gently touched his shoulder. "It is red and swollen compared to the other shoulder. Let me see if I can help you. I bought this earlier in the hotel shop," she said. "Please lie down on the couch."

She went into the bathroom and returned with a plastic bag filled with crushed ice and a damp towel. Gently, she wrapped the ice bag in the damp towel and placed it on his shoulder. She moved it slowly, gently across his swollen shoulder. Gradually, the pain began easing as the coldness worked its soothing magic. He lay face down on the cushions and let Joan gently treat his injured shoulder and arm again. After about twenty minutes, she removed the ice pack. She took a tube of sports cream and began applying the cream to his skin. As it began to soak in, she gently began massaging it into his muscles. He turned his head and looked at her. He sighed and tentatively moved his arm. "That heated cream made it feel so much better. I'll give you a lifetime job doing that," he sighed. She slowly began repeating the cold pack and then the medicated cream. She watched the pain and tension drain from his face. His body began to relax. She quietly got up, washed her hands, put away the ice pack and sports cream. When she tiptoed back into the room, he was still lying on the couch. She bent over and looked at his face to see if he had drifted off to sleep. She jumped back when his eyes opened.

"I thought you had gone to sleep," she said quietly.

"No, I'm not asleep, but you made my shoulder feel so much better. Is there anything you can't do? You save my life, you work magic on my shoulder, and you relax me.

"It's all part of your vacation tour package. Do you think you can sleep now? Are you ready to go to bed? She asked quietly.

"Are you too tired to go in the spa?" he asked. "I think that would help my shoulder and relax my leg muscles."

"I'm a little tired tonight, but that felt so wonderful last time, I'm game to try it again." she answered.

"I think it would be perfect now that some of the pain has gone away. It may help my other stiff muscles relax so I can get a good night's sleep," Dave answered.

In a few minutes, they were both in their bathing suits. Joan slipped into the warm water and laid down on the lounge. Dave moved over to sit on the low bench seat. The water bubbled and swirled around them.

"Did you know that most people say a spa feels much better without any clothes on?" Dave asked mischievously. At Joan's blush and look of shock, he laughed. "Well, that's what people have told me, but I'll keep my suit on as long as you keep yours on."

Joan laughed when she realized Dave was just teasing her to see if he could get a reaction. "Well, I guess there's only one way to find out if it is better with clothes off," she said with a slow smile.

This time it was Dave's turn to look shocked and blush. He quickly turned and looked at her. "Do you mean...," he started to ask.

Joan's laugh interrupted him. "Sure," she said. "I'll leave and let you have the spa to yourself. What did you think I meant?"

"I'll get you for teasing me like that," he threatened with mock anger. He moved quickly across the spa and trapped her body against the smoothness of the spa's lounge seat and the wall. He grabbed her shoulders and held her in place with a light pressure of his body against hers. She looked up into his face. There was a flicker of fear in her eyes, but it quickly disappeared. Dave looked deep into her eyes searching for the truth of what she felt for him.

As the water continued bubbling around their bodies, Joan's hands reached up and touched the bare, warm moist skin of his neck. For a moment, time seemed suspended. Tension began building between them, and, as if drawn together by invisible magnets, their lips moved closer. With a deliberate slowness, their lips moved closer, and they joined their mouths together. It started slowly and then began to gradually change and deepen. He parted her lips with his tongue and took possession of her mouth. Her hands slid up around his neck and she clung to him, pressing her body against him. He pulled her around and sat her down on his lap. All the while, their kiss grew in sweetness and desire began building in both of them.

Joan shivered as if a cold chill had spread down her overheated body as she felt him slip the straps of her bathing suit off her shoulders. His hands gently eased them down her arms, slowly pulling the damp fabric away from her breasts. His hand slid across her skin and tenderly enfolded the warm smooth fullness of her breast. He turned her body slowly towards him. As he did, Joan could feel the bulging fullness of his need for her. She melted into his arms, soft and warm, and overcome with desire for him. His mouth left hers and moved down her neck and shoulders until it drew her breast into his mouth. His lips surrounded her nipple and she shuddered as his tongue began teasing it to life. She ran her fingers through his hair and held his head close to her breast. His hands began moving down her body. As he stroked her and his hand moved closer to her thigh, she arched her body towards him. His hands slowly tugged at her suit, drawing it lower and lower until it encircled her hips. He shifted her weight and slid it down her legs. With a quick motion, it was off her body and draped over the side of the spa. He groaned as his hands moved along her are flesh. His mouth continued its exploration of her breasts while his hands caressed her body. At each touch, she moaned and moved against his hands. He eased her legs apart and she moaned when his fingers slipped inside her body. She sighed as he began stroking her. He felt her body responding to his touch. Each movement of her body, rubbed against his throbbing firmness, causing him to press it closer to her naked body. He looked at her face and read the arousal, the deep sexual desire he was feeling reflected in her flushed features. He took her hand and guided it down to the source of his desires. When her hand touched it, she stiffened and pulled back. It was only a slight movement, but to Dave it brought him back to the awareness of what they were about to do.

## Chapter 17

He looked into her face and knew that he could easily take her now, that she would not fight him if he sat her on his lap and entered her. He knew she was beyond stopping now. He stared at her face and realized he couldn't do it. Not now, not this way. It would be heaven to be driving deep into her body, to relieve the tension and the desire he was feeling. It was what he wanted and needed, but he also knew that he couldn't do it now. If he did, she'd run. She was too vulnerable. She hadn't completely fallen in love with him, not enough to tell him about George, not enough to leave George and marry him. He realized with a jolt that one night of loving her would be amazing, but it wasn't enough. He wanted her. He wanted her more than he had ever wanted anyone before, but he wanted her for a lifetime, not just for one night of a one week affair.

The thought of George and his relationship to Joan came between them like a barrier. Dave slowly released her. His hands moved away from her body. Joan gradually became aware of the change in Dave's touch. A terrible sense of emptiness and shame filled her. She became acutely aware of her nakedness. When he lifted her off his lap and moved across from her, Joan felt as if she had been slapped. Without a word, she quickly stepped out of the spa. She grabbed a towel, wrapped it around her, covering her vulnerable nakedness, ran into her bedroom and slammed the door.

Dave sat there for a few minutes, cursing George and himself for his weakness. He felt emptiness more acute than anything he had ever experienced before. His body returned to normal, and he climbed out of the spa. He retrieved her suit, twisted the water out of it, and then hung both of their suits up to dry. When he crossed the living room to his bedroom, he could hear muffled sobs coming from Joan's bedroom.

He reached for her doorknob, and then he pulled his hand away.

"Joan," he called softly. "Are you all right? May I come in?"

"Please, just go away," she cried.

"I'm so sorry, Joan. I didn't mean to hurt you. I promised this would be strictly business. I should have never touched you or kissed you in the first place. Please try to forgive me," he begged. "Can't we talk about it?"

"No. Not tonight. I just want to be alone," she cried.

"We'll talk about this later. Please forgive me. Sleep well," he sighed.

Joan clutched the pillow tighter against her mouth to try to muffle the sound of her sobbing. She felt so ashamed of her willing response to his touch. She ached with the desire and need his touch had awakened in her. She knew that if he had not pulled back, she would have eagerly made love with him.

She shrank down into the bed and shivered. "Why did he pull back? He could feel me responding to him? He must not really care or love me, or he must love someone else. Why else would he have stopped so suddenly? I could feel he wanted me, but I know he is an honorable man. He said it would be strictly business. That must be why he stopped. He wouldn't break his promise to keep it a 'business trip.' It is just as well," she sobbed. "It would hurt even more saying goodbye to him if we had made love and then he pulled away. Still, I wanted him; I still want him. It would have been something wonderful to remember after we parted. I am so confused," she sobbed.

Exhausted from all the emotions, she sank into a fitful sleep. Her dreams were filled with memories of his caresses and kisses. Each time when she was ready to surrender to his lovemaking, he stopped and she felt cold, empty, and deserted.

The next morning, Dave knocked on Joan's bedroom door, but there was no answer. "Joan, are you alright? Are you awake? Please answer me," he called anxiously. "After last night, could she have left? Joan, are you all right?"

Dave tried the doorknob, but it was locked from the inside. "Joan, are you awake? It's almost 9 am and our plane leaves at 11:30. Please open the door and talk to me. Please, Joan, come and talk to me."

He was getting ready to force his way into the bedroom when he heard noises from the other side of the door. "Joan, are you awake? Please open the door and talk to me," he begged.

"I'm sorry. I just got out of the shower. I'll be dressed and out in a couple of minutes," Joan called.

Dave answered, "Okay. Our plane leaves at 11:30. Do you want me to order breakfast for you?" he said through the closed door.

"Breakfast sounds fine. I'm nearly dressed now, and I am almost packed and ready to leave. Would you order some coffee and orange juice for me?" Joan asked.

About five minutes later, Joan came out of her bedroom wearing green wool slacks and a golden cashmere sweater. Her hair was still wet, so she had it pulled back away from her face and tied it with a green ribbon. She had carefully applied her makeup and the only evidence of the previous night's turmoil was her eyes were a little puffy. When she walked out, Dave turned and watched her bring her suitcase out and put it near the door.

Dave waited for her to speak about what had happened last night in the spa, but all she said was, "How is your shoulder today, Dave? Did you need a pain pill before getting on the plane? It might keep it from getting as sore as it did yesterday."

"No, I don't need any medicine. So far, it is still feeling better. Thanks for putting that medicine and ice pack on it last night. I guess I really overdid it. I'm sorry about last night," he started to say.

"Please, Dave, you don't need to say anything. I understand, and I think you were right. Let's just leave it at that. There's nothing we need to talk about. Has the coffee been delivered yet?" she asked, changing the subject.

In answer to her question, there was a knock on the suite's door. When Dave opened it, the breakfast tray was rolled inside and was placed next to the table. A pot of hot coffee was sitting on the tray. She walked over and poured a cup of coffee, added a splash of cream and sugar. "Do you want me to pour a cup for you?" she asked.

She poured his coffee and put it on the table. She sat down at the table and smiled at him. "What's on the agenda today?" she asked after taking a sip of the coffee.

Dave sat down across from her and poured her some orange juice. He handed her a plate with eggs, sausage patty, creamy grits, and toast. Joan ate silently, barely picking at her food.

Dave asked, "Would you rather have something else to eat? I wasn't sure what you'd want. I can get something else sent up," he suggested.

"No, thanks anyway. I don't feel very hungry this morning. This is fine. I don't normally eat much for breakfast," she answered.

About 10:30, Joan and Dave left the room to go to the airport. After Joan drove to the rental car parking area at the airport, she grabbed her suitcase and carried it to a waiting airport shuttle. Dave reached for her suitcase, but she said, "I've got it. I don't want you carrying mine. You have your own luggage. Trying to manage both suitcases might be one of the reasons why your shoulder has been hurting. I don't want you using it any more than you have to. From now on, you need to use a sling and rest it as much as possible," she explained while they walked through the terminal.

"Joan, I can carry it. You don't have to do that," he said.

"I know, but there's no reason why I can't do it for myself. After all, this is a business trip. I can take care of myself," she answered firmly.

"Please, Joan, it may be business, but you are also my guest. I'd feel better if you let me help you," he insisted.

"It's a moot point now; we are almost to the baggage check in counter. I have always had to take care of myself. I appreciate your offer, but I'd rather finish what I started," she replied, instantly regretting her choice of words.

After checking in their luggage, they headed for the VIP lounge to wait for their flight. Joan began feeling nervous about the flight, but she was determined to handle it by herself. Her nerves were still raw from the events of the night before. She felt angry with herself for not controlling her emotions. Today, she was determined to keep everything on a safe, calm, business-like level.

When the plane began boarding, they were led to first class seats. She stowed her carry-on bag in the compartment above her seat, sat down, buckled her seat belt, and waited while the others boarded. As the plane was taxiing down the runway, Dave took her hand in his. "I know taking off makes you nervous. You can squeeze my hand if it helps," Dave suggested.

"Thanks. I may do that if I get scared, but I think I'll be OK today," she said.

"You can hold my hand, even if you aren't scared," he added with a sheepish grin. Joan visibly relaxed and smiled at Dave. He was trying so hard to be tactful and make her feel comfortable. She gently squeezed his hand and smiled. No matter what, she realized, she couldn't stay angry at Dave for very long.

Dave talked quietly as they flew from Orlando to Seattle/Tacoma airport. "I played my last two years of college in Washington. I haven't been back to visit in several years. One of my oldest and dearest friends lives there still. I wanted to see him again. When I was here at the University, he and his family befriended me. They are totally different than my parents, socially and financially, but they are very special to me. I don't think this visit will be useful for the article, but Henry told me that his brother Jesse was feeling very bad. I wanted to see him and be sure he's all right."

## Chapter 18

After arriving in Seattle, Dave and Joan got their baggage and rented a car. Since Dave's shoulder was still hurting, Joan drove out of the airport parking area. Dave guided her through the traffic and the city streets. He told her to turn right at the next corner. Joan was shocked when he had her turn into the Veteran's Hospital parking lot.

Sensing Joan's surprise, Dave said, "Don't get nervous. This is actually the convalescent section, not the regular hospital. I heard Jesse was not doing well. Lyle told me you don't like going to visit in hospitals, but I'm not sure how much longer Jesse will be with us. I don't like hospitals either, but I would really appreciate your support when I visit him."

"You are right. I hate hospitals, but I'll go with you, if you think it might help," she said reluctantly.

"Thanks," Dave said, "Jesse is a veteran of the Vietnam War. He was terribly wounded in Vietnam, and I think he is a very special man." Joan quickly looked away from Dave so he wouldn't see how much the news had caught her off guard.

In a few minutes, they located Jesse's room. Mandy reluctantly walked into the hospital room. She was shocked to see an old looking black man lying in the bed. With a quick look, Joan noticed both his legs were missing and one of his arms had also been amputated. He looked up at Dave when he entered the room. A warm smile spread across his face. He extended his one good hand, and Dave clasped it in his hand. Dave introduced Jesse to Joan. Jesse smiled and extended his hand to her, "I'm pleased to meet you Miss Joan. Any friend of Dave's is someone I'd like to know."

Joan smiled and shook Jesse's hand. She quickly said, "I am really honored to meet you, Jesse. Thank you for serving in Vietnam for our country. I am so angry and ashamed of this country and how you and the other returning soldiers were treated when you came home. You deserved so much better than you received. I am proud to shake your hand," she added passionately.

Jesse grinned like a Cheshire cat and replied, "Thanks for those kind words. It means a lot to me. You seem to really understand how we felt. The physical wounds were bad enough, but the feelings of rejection and hatred were even worse. None of us really wanted to go to war, but we did what our country asked us to do."

"I do understand. Not all veterans were so badly wounded physically, but they all were injured in one way or another," she added quietly.

"You must have known other Vietnam vets to understand it so clearly," Jesse added.

Joan's face paled as she said, "Yes, I spent many days and nights at Veteran Hospitals. As far as I'm concerned, all of you are heroes, but you were forgotten and betrayed by your own country. Some wounds are easy to see, like yours, but there were thousands who suffered with wounds the world couldn't or wouldn't see," she said passionately as tears rolled down her cheek. Dave quietly reached over and handed her his handkerchief.

"I'm sorry. This touches a very tender spot in my heart, but Dave came here to visit you. I'll sit here and be quiet and let you two talk," Joan said.

Dave moved a chair closer to Jesse's bed. Dave sat down and pulled Joan down on his lap. He kept his arm lightly around her body.

Dave held Jesse's hand as they reminisced about Dave's days in college. Dave explained to Joan, "I stayed in a dorm room with Jesse's youngest brother Henry. That's how I got to know Jesse. You know Henry. He's the offensive lineman that was at Adam's Rib and at Lyle and Cindy's anniversary party. Joan is writing an article about me for a sports magazine. Since I got hurt in practice last week, I've been helping her get information about me for the story. We are heading back to Los Angeles tomorrow. Hopefully my shoulder will be healed enough so I don't have to miss any games. Is there anything you or the others guys here need? " Dave asked.

"You already sent us a lot of things. We love watching that big screen TV in the common room. I get a kick out of watching you and Henry playing football on it. We really don't need much, but we thank you kindly for the magazines and other stuff you ship up to us. That really means a lot to us. Thanks for coming to visit me and for bringing this beautiful lady. She's the prettiest gal I've seen in more years than I can count," he said with a wide smile.

"Well, I can sure see a family resemblance. You and Henry both know how to sweet talk a lady, and you both have the same million dollar smiles," Joan laughed.

Before leaving, Dave gave Jesse a hug. Joan stood up, leaned over and hugged him, also. "It was a real pleasure meeting you. I'll remember you and the other vets here in my prayers. May God bless you and keep you," she whispered in his ear and lightly kissed his cheek.

Jesse beamed at her and said, "Thanks for that, Miss Joan. I appreciate your kind words and prayers."

Driving to their hotel near the airport, Dave kept looking over at Joan as she drove through the crowded streets. Joan's mood was quiet and pensive. Finally Dave reached over and put his hand on her shoulder. She glanced over at him. He noticed there were tears in her eyes.

"You constantly amaze me, Joan. I wish I understood you better. The way you reacted and spoke to Jesse was really beautiful, but I keep thinking there's more to you than meets the eye. I can see you are deep in thought. Why are you so passionate and understanding of Vietnam veterans? Did you know other vets?" he asked.

Joan shook her head yes. "I've met several, but I knew one very well. He came back alive, but horribly injured. I saw him suffer for several years, before he died."

"I'm so sorry, Joan. I had no idea. Was he family?" Dave asked.

"Yes. In a way, he was the only 'family' I had left," she stammered.

"Do you want to talk about it? I'm a good listener," he said.

"No, the past is over. Nothing can be changed by talking about it," Joan said.

"Joan, sometimes it's the things we don't want to talk about that are the most important. When you are ready, please, trust me. I'm here to listen, and I really do care," he said.

"Thanks, Dave, I just don't talk about it with anyone, but I appreciate your offer," Joan said firmly.

That evening, Dave took her to some of the places that he remembered from his college days. He showed her his old dorm building, the apartment building where Henry and his family had lived, and the university football stadium. It was during these stops that Joan learned he had been one of the most sought after quarterbacks in the country and had chosen Washington because of Coach Thompson's recommendation. Dave had also been an outstanding student and had graduated with high honors with a Bachelor of Science degree in Business Administration and Finance.

Afterwards, they had dinner in one of his favorite eating places called The Old Spaghetti Factory. It was located in a large old factory building. There was a full sized trolley car parked in the center of the main dining room. A few tables were inside the trolley, but Dave and Joan were seated in one of the tables that were made out of an old metal bed. There were lots of old Tiffany lamps around the room. After they were seated in one of the 'bed' tables, the waiter brought them menus and a loaf of freshly baked warm bread and a dish of honey butter. The place was crowded and noisy while they sipped on a glass of red wine. They talked and ate their fill of the wonderful spaghetti, fresh mixed green salad, and more delicious slices of fresh made bread.

While eating dinner, Dave looked at Joan with a serious look. He said, "Joan, promise me you won't tell my parents that we ate dinner in bed in Seattle. That might be too shocking for them to handle."

"All right, this will be our little secret, but I hope you realize this is the only bed we'll be sharing in Seattle," she giggled.

"Does that mean after tonight, we can share a bed when we aren't in Seattle?" he said with a mischievous grin.

"Only in your dreams, Dave. Remember, we are friends and business associates, not lovers," she added pointedly.

"Touché!" Dave said with a playful wink and smile. "It feels good to be laughing and teasing as friends again, although the other sounds very interesting too. While you are in Seattle, I want to take you to an unbelievable place called Seattle Underground. It is part of Seattle's history, and I thought it was really fascinating."

After leaving the restaurant, they drove down to the entrance and walked through Seattle Underground. It had been the original business district, and was the oldest part of the city of Seattle, but, after the sea level changed, a new layer of businesses had been built on top of the lower layer. The older underground city was full of interesting places and lots of funny stories and facts. Joan was fascinated by all that she saw and heard and jotted several notes about it in her journal.

"This would make a wonderful travel article, but I don't know if people would really understand it, unless they actually went through and heard the funny stories the tour guides tell. Thanks for bringing me here. I really enjoyed seeing it," Joan said as they walked hand in hand through the underground streets.

Dave watched her and was overjoyed to see her laughing and acting like herself, -- relaxed, excited, and happy. They settled back into the easy-going friendship and laughed together.

Next, they went to the Space Needle and rode the elevator to the top to look at the lights of Seattle that spread out in all directions. At the top, there was a revolving restaurant. They sat at one of the window tables in the cocktail bar enjoying the 360 degree view of the Seattle skyline. As the restaurant revolved slowly,before leaving the bar, Dave led her out onto the dance floor. He took Joan into his arms, and they danced slowly to the live band. The music swirled around them, and Joan felt secure in Dave's arms. When the dance was over, they left and went back to their hotel.

When they got back to the suite, Joan asked Dave if his shoulder was hurting. Dave said, "Yes, it's sore, but hopefully, it will be better in the morning."

"Would you like me to use the ice pack and cream on your shoulder again?" she asked.

"I hate to impose on you, but it really helped me a lot last night. If I promise to behave, will you work your magic again?" he asked.

Joan gently removed his coat and shirt. Dave lay down on the couch, and Joan gave him a treatment with the ice pack. As she slowly moved it across his shoulders, he sighed and turned his head to watch her. Next, she applied the warm sports cream, and then gently massaged his shoulder and arm. She felt him relax under her gentle touch. He sighed and smiled at her.

"You are marvelous, Joan. What would I do without you? I've never had a friend as kind and caring as you. You mean so much to me," he sighed.

When the treatment was over, he sat up and moved his shoulder gingerly in a slow circle. "That feels so much better. How can I thank you for all you have done for me? The words 'Thank you' just aren't enough." He gently pulled her down next to him on the sofa and hugged her close. He held her for a long minute, before kissing her tenderly. Then he stood up and sent her off to her bed.

Lying in bed, Joan marveled at how amazing the day had been. She was thankful that she'd have this one wonderful week to remember after she stopped seeing Dave. She was resigned to the fact that she and Dave could never be together.

Thinking back to her conversation with Dave after leaving the Veterans Hospital, she felt thankful that he had not pressed her for more information. Her past connection with the Vietnam War had nearly come out. She decided that she would finish the article and then break off all connections with Dave. That thought made her want to cry, but she knew she must do it soon, or she might not be brave enough to stop seeing him.

"I know I'll never love any one as much as I love Dave, but there is no chance of a future with him. I am so thankful for this week with him. I will always treasure the memories of this perfect week to remember after we part company," she thought.

While they were waiting in the terminal for the flight back to Los Angeles, Dave said, "Although we are flying back to Los Angeles today, our trip is not really over. There are several things I want to show you in the Los Angeles area that might be useful in the article. We still have two days left in our week, and I intend to keep you busy during that time."

## Chapter 19

The flight to Los Angeles was shorter than the other flights. When they landed at LAX, Dave and Joan took the airport shuttle to where he had left his car. He put their luggage in the trunk and opened the door for her.

She drove out of the parking area and headed up the Pacific Coast Highway. It was a beautiful, sunny day along the beach while Dave settled back and enjoyed the fresh air. She turned into Dave's driveway and drove up to the front of his house. He got out, opened Joan's door. They got their luggage out of the trunk and headed inside.

Once inside, Mrs. Jensen came walking out of the kitchen. She hugged Dave and said, "Welcome home, Dave and Joan. It's good to see you both. How was your trip?" she asked eagerly.

Dave hugged her back and answered, "The trip was great. We talked to a lot of people, saw some really interesting places, and hopefully got lots of great information for Joan's article. There are several places and things to see around here, so we are finishing our research in this area. Would you put Joan's suitcase in the guest bedroom? I think we can accomplish a lot more with both of us working from here."

Joan looked over at him with a surprised look. She wondered what Mrs. Jensen would think about that arrangement, but she just smiled and said, "I have it all ready for her. I even got the computer set up and ready for her to use, if she wants to use it. I am really anxious to read your article. When do you think it will be ready?"

"Joan, how long do you think you'll need to work on it? I know you took a lot of notes, but I never thought to ask about how long it takes to write an article like this," Dave said.

"I'm not really sure. First, we have to go over everything and decide what slant you want to use and figure out what to include and what to omit. That will be the hardest part. I've learned so much that is interesting about you. I'm not sure about the writing time, since this isn't the kind of writing I usually do. I'll work on it and get it done as quickly as I can," she said.

"I'm not trying to rush you. You can take as much time as you need. I'll do whatever I can to help you with it, but you are the one with the writing talent. I'm relying on you to do whatever you think is best," Dave said.

"Do you mind if I go in and freshen up? I'd like to take a shower and put on some fresh clothes. While I'm doing that, maybe you can lie down and rest your shoulder. Then you can decide where to go and what we need to do," Joan said.

"That sounds like a good plan to me. Mrs. Jensen will see that you have whatever you need. I'll be in my room when you are finished," Dave agreed.

Joan showered and brushed her hair until it shone and hung softly around her shoulders. She pulled a pair of sky blue Capri pants out of her suitcase and added a silky white top, before going down the hall to Dave's bedroom. Not hearing any noises, she cautiously knocked on the door, not wanting to awaken him if he was dozing.

"Come in, I'm awake and dressed," he added in a teasing voice.

"Were you able to get any rest?" she asked.

"I've been lying on my bed, resting my shoulder. We're not in Seattle anymore. Do you want to lie down on the bed with me," he suggested and gave her a mischievous grin.

"Sorry, but I'm still working, remember what you said. Our trip isn't over for two more days," she laughed, turning his words against him. "Well, have you decided what you want to do next?"

"Sure, but you already turned that down. Seriously, I am supposed to go to the Special Olympic training facility this afternoon. I've been working with Special Olympics most of my life. That's one of Mom's favorite groups. Mainly I just talk to the athletes and encourage them to keep trying. Some of them are fairly good at their events, but the joy is seeing everyone, winners and losers, all smiling and feeling proud of their accomplishments. It's for those smiles and hugs that I keep going back to work there. Because of my shoulder injury, all I can really do this time is give praise and encouragement. After that, I usually visit the kids at the Children's Hospital for a few minutes. That's something I try to do at least twice a month. After that, I don't have any commitments," he added.

When they arrived at the Special Olympic training center, many of the young athletes crowded around Dave. They gingerly touched the sling he was wearing on his injured shoulder.

"You hurt?" one young boy asked.

Dave smiled and said, "Yes, but not enough to keep me from coming to see you. How are you today Jeff?"

"I am good," he answered with a big smile. "Will you watch me run my race?"

"Sure, Jeff. This is my friend Joan. She wants to watch, too," Dave said.

"She's beautiful. Is she your girl friend?" he asked.

"She is my best friend, and she is very beautiful," he added smiling at Joan.

They walked over to the track. There were several boys and girls waiting for their event to start. Dave gave each one a smile and a one-armed hug. All of the kids knew him by name and clearly adored being around him. He helped get the group of runners lined up. He explained to them how to get the best start when the race began. He cheered them on and had words of praise for their effort.

One little girl was left behind by the others when the gun sounded to start the race. She sat down on the lane and began crying. Dave rushed over, helped her stand up, put his good arm around her shoulder, and comforted her. After that, he took her aside and had her practice her starting position again. He explained the order of the commands she would hear and how to react to each of them. After a few practice starts, she jumped up and down happily as she saw how much she had improved.

Joan asked Dave about her. He explained that she was mentally slow and did not remember from meet to meet what she should do, but he praised her for continuing to keep trying. She hugged Dave and ran off the join the next practice group. "She probably won't remember what I tried to teach her, but she felt encouraged and successful when she left. That's the payoff for me, seeing them happy and encouraged," he added.

About 3:30, they left the training center and headed to the Los Angeles Children's Hospital. She parked the car and walked beside him through the entryway.

It was much the same story here, as Dave went from room to room offering words of cheer and smiles of hope. Many of the children recognized him and called him by name. He sat beside some of the beds and just held the patient's hand. The ones who were feeling stronger, he talked with about many things. No matter what he was saying or doing for each child, he always gave them his undivided attention and a kiss on the cheek or a firm handshake before moving on to the next child. Some of the parents who were there, thanked him gratefully. They said they were praying that his shoulder would heal quickly. Many of the parents had tears in their eyes as they watched Dave relating to their children.

In the arts and crafts room, he stopped to admire each drawing or work of art they had created. One young teen-aged boy showed the picture he had drawn with colored pencils. One look at it, and Joan recognized it was a fairly good representation of Dave's face.

"I tried the technique you showed me last time you were here. I think it is better than the last one. What should I work on next?" he asked.

Dave looked carefully at the drawing. He shook his head, "I think you've got it just right now! I couldn't have done it any better. I'm so very proud of you," Dave praised. The smile on the boy's face was brighter than the sun shining through the nearby window.

By the time the visit to the children was over, Joan was awed by how loving and caring Dave had been with each one. As they left the hospital, Joan asked, "How long have you been coming here? What did the young boy mean when he mentioned the technique you showed him?" she asked.

"I've been coming here since I started playing for the Rams. Ron, the boy with the drawing of me, was referring to a hint about perspective and shading and how to achieve a feeling of depth in a two dimensional art form. When I have time off, I like to paint and draw. I especially enjoy painting with oils, especially doing seascapes and landscapes. Sometimes I try doing portraits, but I'm not very good at it, but I enjoy trying to do it sometimes," he said.

"Will you show me some of your paintings or drawings? I'd like to see what kind of artistic talent you have," Joan added.

"You may be disappointed, but remind me when we get home and I'll point some of them out to you. My shoulder is beginning to hurt worse than it did this morning. I think I need to go home and rest for a while. If I ask politely would you consider giving my shoulder another treatment? I'd sure appreciate it," he said with a smile.

"I'll consider it. Hum. I have considered it carefully and I say I'd be delighted to give you a massage treatment. I'm afraid you've been doing too much all week," she scolded.

"I know, but these two groups mean a lot to me, and they were expecting me to be here. It was worth a little soreness, just seeing them smile," he answered.

Once at home, Mrs. Jensen had a late lunch waiting for them. After eating, Dave stretched out on his bed and Joan gave him a treatment with ice packs and medicated sports cream. Dave relaxed and fell into a light sleep. Joan quietly left his room and closed the door. She went to the kitchen and found Mrs. Jensen preparing a pot roast. Joan volunteered to help peel and cut up the vegetables. They chatted while Dave took a long nap. When Dave woke up, he found the two women sitting at the kitchen table drinking glasses of iced tea.

Dave walked into the room and smiled ruefully. "Why did you let me sleep so long? I felt so relaxed after you gave my shoulder that light massage, I guess I dozed off. How long have I been asleep?" he asked.

Joan looked at her watch and smiled, "About 3 hours, I think. We let you sleep because you needed the rest. Although the trip was fun, it was also very tiring for you. The pain sapped your energy. I was glad you finally got some good quality rest time. I don't want to get blamed if your shoulder isn't improved enough when you go back to the doctor on Monday. I'd hate to have your offensive linemen out gunning for me," she kidded.

## Chapter 20

Before dinner, they went out and sat down in Dave's favorite viewpoint on the terrace. The California sun was beginning to lower in the sky. They heard the cry of seagulls on the beaches below his house. A gentle ocean breeze caressed them as they sat watching the day coming to an end. Dave moved over, and put his good arm lightly around Joan's shoulder. She sighed contentedly and leaned back against him. They watched the sun disappear below the horizon line. Each one was lost in their own thoughts.

Gradually darkness arrived and they went back into the house. Dave led her over to the leather couch and pulled her down to sit by his side. Joan looked over at Dave and said, "I was just thinking, I've met and talked to many people this week and heard what they have to say, but I've never interviewed you to get your opinions. Do you feel up to answering some question?" She asked.

"I'll try my best to answer, just no prying or looking for sinister sensational past indiscretions," he hinted mysteriously.

"Now you've aroused my reporter's curiosity. Let's have the facts, all the facts," she said in her sternest business-like voice.

"Being with you and talking to you has aroused many things in me. I wish you'd tell me more about yourself. I really don't have any dark secrets buried in my past. You pretty well have seen the best and worst in me. Will you answer my questions, if I answer yours?" he asked.

"Sorry, that's not part of this writing assignment," she said. Dave got up and returned with two glasses of white wine. They sipped on them and Joan began asking questions.

"What do you want to be doing five or ten years down the road?" she asked in her best reporter voice.

"That's an easy question. I've thought a lot about it lately. I hope I will be healthy enough and still playing well enough to be out on the field playing football. I realize only time will tell if I will stay healthy, but that is part of what I want to have in my life. If I am not able to play, I would like to coach football somewhere or possibly be a TV commentator. When my football career is over, I'd like to settle down on a small ranch or someplace like my Mom and Dad have and do something to help children, but I'm not sure what that will be."

Joan scribbled notes as long as he kept talking. She finished jotting them down and realized Dave was no longer talking. "What else do you want in your lifetime?" she asked.

"I know I want to get married, settle down somewhere, and raise a family. All I really need now is someone who'll share her love and life with me. I long to find a woman who will love me for me, someone who loves me and me alone. Is that too much to ask for?" he asked quietly looking at her.

"No, it sounds like a perfectly natural desire. I think that's what most people want, too, but, sometimes it's hard to find," Joan added. "Why haven't you married before now?"

"I was so driven to be successful in my football career, I spent most of my time and energy practicing and concentrating on my studies. I didn't date much in college, and after college, I never was sure if women wanted to date me or the 'great Dave Allen, pro quarterback'. I got pretty disillusioned by some of the women I met. I guess I never found the right woman, until earlier this year. I have met and fallen in love with the right woman for me, the one I love and want to marry, but she's involved with another man right now and she isn't being honest about him with me. I still love her and want to marry her. I am longing for her to tell me the truth and tell me that she loves me, only me. All I want is for her to love me, and only me. Is that too much to ask for?" Dave spat out brokenly.

"No," Joan answered wistfully, looking down at her hands to keep him from seeing the hurt and pain in her eyes. She sat quietly as she realized that Dave was already in love with someone. "That explains so many things about how he responds to me. He has desires and needs, but the one he loves doesn't return his passion," Joan mused.

Dave intently watched her, hoping she would tell him about George, but she remained silent. When she doesn't tell him anything, Dave leaned away from her. He put his head in his hands and groaned with sadness and frustration. Joan looked at him and instinctively longed to reach out and comfort him, but she stopped because she knew now that he loved someone else.

Dave straightened up and sadly shook his head. Changing the subject, Joan reminded Dave that he was going to show her some of his paintings. He stood up, pulled her to her feet and began walking through the house. In the entry way, he pointed out a large picture of a wave breaking on the rocks below his house. The wave was frosted with white foam while the sunlight caught and reflected a sense of restless power.

"Is this one of your paintings?" she asked.

"Yes, this is an old one. For a long time, I just painted them and stored them in closets. Lately I have put them out on display. They aren't works of the great masters of the past, but they do reflect how I see the world," he explained.

Further down the hallway, he pointed out 'twin' paintings. "These two paintings are of the same location. One was painted on a clear summer day, and the other was painted in the cold days of winter," he explained.

"These are beautiful. I am amazed at how well you captured the mood of the moment in each one. Summer is alive, happy, and hopeful. The winter one is brooding and pensive. It reveals the exquisite detail of the gnarled tree trunk, and each twist hints of storms that it survived. It makes me think of life: some parts are beautiful and filled with hope; other parts are filled with gloom and lack of hope. You are very talented, Dave. After football, you could easily paint and sell your paintings. "

"I don't know about that. I paint them to express feelings trapped inside my heart. I doubt if I'd ever try to sell them, but, after a while, unless I sell them or give them away, I'll run out of wall space I don't want to appear to be bragging, but with my dad's example of hard work, saving, and wise investing when I was growing up, and my education in finance and business, I have made a lot of good investments over the years I've been playing. I could retire right now and live a very comfortable lifestyle. I am not ready to quit working and living and settle down in a rocking chair and watch the world go by. I still enjoy playing football and want to play for as long as I can do it well," Dave admitted.

The chiming of a tall grandfather clock in the hallway startled them. Joan looked at her watch, "I can't believe it is midnight. It seems like we just began talking a few minutes ago. I don't know about you, but I need to get to bed if I'm going to be of any help tomorrow when we start going over the information for the article. You'd better get some rest, too. I'm hoping you can guide me on how to approach this story." Joan stood up and carried the wine glasses back to the kitchen. Dave heard her turn on the water and rinse each glass clean. When she returned, he took her hand in his and walked her down the hall to her bedroom door.

"Remember, I'm just across the hall if you need me," he whispered. He gently pulled her into a loose embrace. He kissed her forehead and opened the door for her. "Sleep well, dearest Joan," he whispered before turning and walking quickly into his bedroom.

Joan watched him walk away and heard his door close. 'Now I understand why he no longer kisses me with such passion. I was afraid of his passion and touch. I guess I got what I wanted, but why do I feel so sad about it? That explains why he's treating me like a virgin queen. At least, he admitted his love for another woman. That woman must be a fool not to run into his arms and marry him. If things were different, that's exactly what I would want to do! I have to stop seeing Dave. Since he's in love with another, I can only get hurt by staying around him," she thought.

## Chapter 21

On their last day together before Joan was scheduled to go back to work, Dave surprised her by taking her to church with him. "During the football season, with all the scheduled games, I don't get to church often. When I am not playing or travelling, I usually go to the Sunday morning services. When I was growing up, we always used to attend church together as a family, and I don't feel right when I miss church."

Sitting beside Dave in the sanctuary, Joan listened to Dave's deep baritone voice as he sang along with the congregation. When the preacher spoke, Joan felt the warming presence of the Holy Spirit. Afterwards, they grabbed a bite to eat and headed home. Mrs. Jensen had Sundays off, so the house was empty when they walked inside.

"Now, what is the next step in working on the article?" Dave asked.

"We need to review all our information, sort it out and decide what you want included. Can you think of anything that you know you don't want included?" Joan asked.

Joan retrieved all her notes and began laying them out in stacks on the dining room table. She had notes on Dave's childhood, mostly from his Mom and Dad. There was a stack from Coach Thompson about his high school improvement and his early character on and off the field. Another pile was about his days in college in Washington. Another large stack included his professional career, including awards, relationships with other players, and his current season. Another pile had quotes from family, friends, and teammates.

Joan looked around and noticed that Dave's scrapbook was not on the table. "Where is the scrapbook your mom made for you? I didn't make notes about that information yet."

"It's on the desk in my bedroom. Do you want it?" he asked.

"Yes, I'd like to borrow it for a few minutes," Joan answered.

They walked down the hallway to retrieve it. When they walked in, Joan noticed an easel set up in the corner by the window. It had a cloth draped over it.

"What are you working on right now?" she asked walking over to it.

"It's not finished yet. I'm still working on it, but I haven't been able to capture the subject yet," Dave said.

"May I look at it?" Joan asked.

"I don't usually show my paintings until they are finished, but I'm not keeping secrets from you. For you, I'll make an exception." he said as he removed the cloth.

Joan stood, not believing her eyes, when she realized it was a portrait of a woman. She had blue-green eyes and light brown hair that fell softly around her face. The mouth was slightly open in a warm smile. She seemed to be looking up at someone standing beside her and was ready to speak or be kissed. She was lying down naked except for a piece of flowing blue material that barely covered her body.

Joan looked quickly over at Dave with a quizzical look on her face. "I don't know what to say or think. It is really a lovely painting, but it looks like me. Is this a portrait of me?" she asked hesitantly.

"It's actually a portrait of the woman I've fallen in love with and want to marry," Dave said with a guilty blush. "She's involved with another man, and she isn't being honest with me about him."

"It is very beautiful. I can understand why you love her," Joan said.

"I'm not in love with her just because she is beautiful. She is more beautiful than I could ever paint her, because much of her beauty is from the inside. She's gentle, loving, intelligent, and everything I have ever wanted. I am waiting until the right moment to give it to her. Until then, I keep it here to give me hope that one day we will be married," Dave answered slowly.

"I hope she does love you, Dave. You deserve the best of everything," Joan said. Joan picked up the scrapbook and hurried out of the room.

Back at the dining room, she put the scrapbook down on the table. Dave looked at the stacks of information and just shook his head. "I had no idea you had taken so many notes. How did you collect so much information? I only saw you writing a few times," he asked.

"After each session, when I got back to my room, I continued jotting down information they told me. I can remember things fairly well, but I always try to get it on paper before changing to another source. That's what I was doing most of the time when I was alone in my room. What suggestions do you have for the content or slant of the article?" Joan asked.

"I'm totally out of my area of expertise here, Joan. What I want is an honest, true picture of who I am. I can't think of anything I would leave out of the article, except our relationship and things that are sensational or misleading." When he noticed a strange look cloud her face when he mentioned their relationship, he quickly explained, "I am not ashamed or embarrassed about my feelings for you and what we have done together. To me, it is just very personal and not for publication."

"Thanks, I agree with that, besides it would make people doubt the objectivity of what I write about you. I know I am going to have to work extra hard to be totally objective."

"No matter what you include, I trust you totally and leave full control of the content to you. I do still want to read it before it is submitted for publication. How can I help you now?" he asked.

"Let's start with one stack and go over what information that I got. The organizing is usually the hardest part; once that is done, the writing usually flows naturally," she explained.

As she read through each set of notes, she tried to read his feelings about what she had included in each one, but he rarely reacted, unless to add a comment about the person who had been interviewed.

About six o'clock, Dave stood and stretched. He laughed, "This is harder for me than playing football. I'm getting hungry. How about stopping for tonight and either go out to eat or fix something here."

"How's your shoulder doing tonight?" she asked.

"It's better, but it is still a little sore," he answered.

"Let's go see what we have in the kitchen that we can fix. I think staying in might be easier on your shoulder; that is, if you trust me to cook for you," she added.

"That sounds fine to me. I really don't feel much like going out in public tonight. Maybe we can fix something together," he suggested.

They left the papers on the dining room table and went exploring in the kitchen cupboards. The refrigerator and cupboards were well stocked. "What do you feel like for dinner? It looks like we have everything we need for an old fashioned 'breakfast dinner', a healthy vegetable salad, hamburgers or sandwiches. Do you have any preference?" she asked.

"I'm not fussy. What is a 'breakfast dinner?'" Dave asked.

"Sometimes when I was very young, my dad would surprise me with a favorite breakfast meal at dinner time. Looking back now, I think he did it because it was easy and cheap, but I thought it was a treat. French toast, hot cakes, or a favorite cold cereal were some of our choices," Joan explained.

"That sounds easy and fun. I haven't had French toast in years. Maybe we can have some eggs, ham or bacon, and French toast. How does that sound?" he asked.

"Do you want me to cook it and serve you or do you want to help?" she asked.

"Working together might be fun. I'm pretty spoiled with Mrs. Jensen's cooking, but I should learn how to cook basic things like these. What do we need to make our breakfast dinner?" Dave asked.

Joan got bread, eggs, milk, butter, and a slice of center cut ham out of the refrigerator and put them on the counter. She looked in the lower cupboards and found two frying pans and a mixing bowl. Dave began cracking eggs in the mixing bowl.

Looking in the bowl, she laughed. "I see you got some egg shells in there. Do you like your French toast extra crunchy?" She asked. Then she carefully picked them out of the bowl.

As Joan gave directions, he mixed in milk, salt and pepper, Joan took the ham slice, cut it into serving size pieces, and put it into one of the pans. She had Dave cut the bread slices in half, dip them in the egg solution, and begin frying them in the other skillet. While cooking, they laughed and fought over space on the stove. Dave laughed and hugged Joan and shifted her out of the way. The sound of the ham sizzling in the pan signaled them to get serious and finish cooking their meal. They sat at the small table in the kitchen and devoured their 'breakfast dinner.' After they were finished eating, Joan cleared off the table and began washing the dishes.

"You can leave the dishes, and Mrs. Jensen will clean them up tomorrow," he said.

"I know, but I'd rather do them myself. I'm used to cooking and cleaning up after myself. It will only take a couple of minutes," Joan said.

"You wash, and I'll dry," Dave said, taking a dish towel off the rack. They worked together and quickly had the kitchen back in order.

When they walked into the living room, Dave took her hand and pulled her into his embrace. "You forgot to make dessert for me. I want a sweet treat!" he said pouting like a child.

Joan giggled, "I'm sorry, you'll have to go to bed without your dessert."

Dave hugged her closer and bent down and captured her lips with his. The kiss changed when their mouths opened and their tongues touched. Dave pulled her against his body. Joan's body arched against him and she felt herself growing more and more aroused. Slowly Dave loosened his grip. "Now that's what I call a delicious dessert," he whispered against her ear. Slowly Dave released her and Joan moved unsteadily away from him.

"I hate to see tomorrow come, Joan. This week with you has been the most wonderful time of my life. I don't want it to end, but I know you are supposed to be back at work tomorrow, and I have an appointment with the team doctor. I have thoroughly enjoyed being with you, and I am going to miss seeing you and talking to you all the time. We didn't talk about this before, but do you want to go home tonight or get up early tomorrow and I'll drive you to your apartment or to your job? I could do either. If I take you to your job, I could meet Mr. White and personally give him the tickets I promised. Then, after work, I could pick you up and take you wherever you want to go," Dave suggested.

"I've enjoyed this week so much. I've met such interesting people and seen things and places I would probably never have had a chance to see. You have been so much fun to be around, and I'm going to miss you a lot, too. I don't know which would be better for you. If I leave tonight, you could get more sleep tomorrow morning and be more rested when you go to the doctor. I hate you having to go out tonight, but I think it would be best for me to go home tonight. Why not just call a cab for me? That way you could stay here and rest. Let me gather up my research and grab my suitcase," she said.

"I wouldn't consider having you take a cab. I'll take you home, even though I'd rather have you stay here with me. I like having you near me. Your touch has done more for my shoulder and given me more relief from pain than any pain medication could do. I know you have your life to get back to, so I'm being selfish trying to keep you here longer. I'm sure there are others you need to see or talk to," he hinted. "Get your stuff together and I'll take you home," he added sadly.

## Chapter 22

Once in the car, they both seemed to be unable to speak freely. Dave kept praying that Joan would open up and tell him about George. Joan was feeling guilty because she had still not told Dave where she actually lived. There was no way to tell him now without having to explain more than she could afford to say. It would be easier to make a clean break if he didn't know where to find her.

When they pulled up in front of the Lincoln Arms Apartment building, Joan hopped out of Dave's car. Dave got out and retrieved her suitcase. When he handed it to her, their hands brushed. That same feeling of electrical energy jolted both of them.

"Do you want me to walk you to your apartment? I hate saying good night out here in the street," Dave said.

No," she said quickly. "It's too late and my place is a mess. I'll talk to you after work. In my evening time, I'll be working on your article. I'll let you know how it is going. When it is finished, I'll give you a call," she said.

"When will I see you again?" Dave asked.

"I don't know. Between work each day and working on the article at night, I won't have much free time. I know you have two away games in a row, so I won't see you at the games. Let's just leave it open. You know how to call me at work and at home. Thank you again, Dave, for the most wonderful week of my life," Joan said.

Dave put his arms around her and hugged her close. "I don't want to let you go, Joan. I feel so happy when you're around. I'll be calling you, but I want to see you, too. This isn't goodbye. It is 'I'll see you later'." He said before kissing her tenderly and then he watched her walk away.

Dave slowly started his car and drove back to his home. It was so dark and lonely when he went inside, he felt like turning around and bringing Joan back to stay with him. He cursed angrily when he realized, she wouldn't be at that apartment building, and he didn't know how to find her.

Joan called a taxi and waited until it picked her up. She felt totally sad and lonely. She knew she wouldn't be seeing Dave again, not after the article was finished. After the luxury of the hotels she had stayed in or the beautiful spaciousness of his house, her apartment seemed so tiny and empty. She unpacked her suitcase, laid out clothes for work the next day, and got ready for bed. "Good night, Dave," she whispered, "I love you and I always will, but we can't be together again." She buried her head in her pillow, and then she cried herself to sleep.

When Joan arrived at work the next day, there was a bouquet of pink roses on her desk. Mr. White welcomed her back. He told her they had finished the inventory, and he had all the numbers to give her. She took the papers from him and sat down at her desk. She noticed a card tucked in the flowers. With shaking hands, she opened it and read, "Thanks for everything. I hope your day goes well. I'll talk to you tonight. Please give these tickets to your boss; I forgot to give them to you before you left. Love, Dave"

Joan walked into her boss's office. She handed him the envelope with the Ram tickets, and said, "Dave asked me to give these tickets to you personally and thank you again for giving me the time off to work on the article."

"Thanks, Joan. How was your trip?" he asked.

"It was hectic. We covered a lot of places and interviewed several people, but it was also fun and interesting. We went to Florida and Washington. It was the trip of a lifetime for me, but it's good to be home again. I still have a lot of work to do before the article is finished. I'm glad you were able to get the inventory finished. I'll get busy on the figures and reports. Thanks again," Joan replied.

After work, Joan hurried home anxious to get started on the article. Joan looked through her notes and reviewed the information in Dave's scrapbook. She started slowly separating the information into small groups of related information, looking for a theme to tie all of the facts together. One thing impressed her as she finished re-reading everything. "That's it!" she exclaimed. "It's certainly not a new idea, but all his accomplishments seem to revolve around this statement by Coach Thompson, 'Basically, Dave Allen is a good person who has become successful by hard work, making good choices, and treating all people with respect'. That might be the best focus for the article. Everyone who follows sports already knows his stats and what he has done on the playing field. This article will help them understand who he is and how he reached the level of success that he has achieved."

Once Joan had the theme, she began putting the facts in logical order. She began with a short section on his family and background. Coach Thompson's recollections would help explain his early success. His choice of college and what he did on and off the field, his work with the Special Olympics, Children's Hospital, and Veterans, his educational choices, and his relationships with players and others. These things were going to be the basic ingredients of the article.

When the phone rang about 8 o'clock, Joan answered and heard Dave's voice. "Hello," she answered.

"Hi, Joan. How did your first day back at work go? Did you remember to give Mr. White the tickets?" he asked.

"Everything was fine. They got the inventory finished, and I got most of the data compiled. My boss was so excited when I gave him the tickets. He is really a fan of yours. Also, thanks for the beautiful roses. I'm getting spoiled. Each bouquet has been a different color. What are you going to do when you run out of colors?" Joan laughed.

"I guess I'll just have to start over again or maybe I'll mix them all together, like a floral rainbow," he laughed. "Did you want to go get something to eat or drink? I'm sure you already ate, but how about some dessert?" he asked.

"Your favorite dessert or some ice cream?" she asked teasingly.

"Either, or both, I just hoped to see you tonight. I think I'm having Joan withdrawals," he moaned.

"I'm working on your article and I think I've figured out a plan. It is a little late to get together, but tell me what the doctor said?" she inquired.

"Well, my shoulder isn't healed, but he did allow me to begin light practice on Wednesday. I need to be very careful and take it easy, but I might be able to play a little in next week's game in Houston. If you don't want to go out, can I come over and see you for a while?" he asked.

"How about a rain check? I've got a good start on the article, and I want to keep at it while I'm making progress. Besides, we just saw each other yesterday evening," Joan protested.

"It seems longer ago than that. Well, I guess I just have to stay here all by myself," he said with his pouty voice.

"I'm sorry you are feeling so lost and lonely, but our trip is over, and we are both back at work. I'll call you when I have more done on the article. Sleep well, Dave," she said before hanging up.

Joan's life fell back into her normal routine. Work during the day, go home and fix a light dinner, read or work on an article, and then go to bed. Even though she kept herself busy, she missed seeing and being around Dave. Her thoughts and dreams were filled with him, but she forced herself to pull back away from him. When he called, she talked briefly with him, but didn't go to see him. He seemed hurt by her not agreeing to see him, but she stuck to her plan to avoid being physically close to him.

He left for Houston for practice before the game, but he still called her in the evening. When Joan answered the phone, she smiled to hear his voice. Despite everything, she knew she still loved him, but she was determined to break connections with him. It was safer for her, and it might allow him to concentrate on winning the woman he loved.

When he came home from the Houston game, he called her. The game had not gone well, although they had managed to win. He had been on the sidelines most of the game. He went in for ten plays, mostly handing the ball off and protecting his throwing arm.

"It is awful having to stand by the sidelines and watch. It was so hard not being able to play, but after ten plays, I could feel my shoulder was getting sore again. I wish you'd let me come and see you. I could use a shoulder treatment," he said hopefully.

"Dave, you know I have to work tomorrow. It's too late and too much trouble for you to have to come and pick me up and then bring me home. If you promise to be a good boy," she said, "I'll drive over and give you a treatment. That's the best offer I can make tonight," she suggested.

"That's the best offer I've had since we got back from Florida, and I'll gladly take it. I'll turn on the porch light. I'll be here waiting for you. Thanks, Joan, I really want to see you."

Joan kicked herself mentally for being so weak and agreeing to come to Dave's house. She knew it was a mistake, but she wanted so much to see him also. She drove over to his house, parked near the front door, and knocked.

Dave opened the door and smiled broadly. "What took you so long?" he asked teasingly.

"Sorry, they lowered the speed limit and I stopped at the grocery store and washed my hair before coming over," she laughed. "It's been less than 3o minutes since you called me at home."

He pulled her inside and hugged her tenderly. "I know, but it's been so long since I've seen you. It is so good to see you again. I have really missed you. Thanks for driving over here. I appreciate it."

"Where do you want me to give you the treatment? Since it relaxes you and makes you sleepy, do you want to lie down in your bed? That way you can go right to sleep," Joan suggested.

"That would be wonderful."

They walked down the hallway and entered Dave's bedroom. Joan helped him remove his shirt, and then she went to the kitchen to get some ice cubes. When she got back, Dave was stretched out on his bed. Joan sat down next to him. She put the ice pack on his shoulder and began moving it slowly over the sore area. After a few minutes, she squeezed the sports cream into her hand and began gently massaging it into his skin.

Dave turned his head so he could watch her. "If I were a cat, I'd be purring," he sighed. "Your touch is magical. I don't want you to ever stop touching me," he said honestly.

Joan blushed, "If you were a cat, I'd probably be sneezing. Sorry, but I am a little allergic to cats. I hope that helps you relax and get some good rest. I hope you are feeling better very soon. I'd better let you rest and go home."

Dave grabbed her hand. He sat up and pulled her against him. "Please, Joan, don't leave. Stay here with me tonight. I need you. I want to make love to you," he pleaded.

Joan tried to get up, but he pulled her down onto his lap and began kissing her hungrily. His tongue entered her mouth and he kissed her fiercely. Joan felt herself falling into his spell. When she heard him say, 'I need you', it brought her back to her senses. She pushed him away and stood up. With a moan, she grabbed her purse and dashed out to her car. Before he could stop her, she drove away sobbing.

"He needs me, does he? He's in love with someone else, but he needs me! I can't take this any longer. I have to stay away from him. I don't know if I have enough strength to do it, knowing he is so close and wants me. I may have to move far away from him or I may lose myself again," she cried as she drove home.

When Joan walked into her apartment, the phone was ringing. She checked the caller id. It was Dave, but she couldn't face talking to him feeling so hurt. She reached down and unplugged the receiver. She went to bed and cried herself to sleep. All night she tossed and turned with her emotions in turmoil.

## Chapter 23

She continued working each day at the auto parts store and coming home to her empty apartment each night. She left her phone unplugged and forced herself to work on writing the article. "Once I've turned this article over to Dave, I will have no reason to see him or talk to him again. I don't know how I can stop wanting to be with him. How can I stop loving him and wanting him? I have to stop, or I will not survive. He just wants me, but he loves someone else," she decided.

At work, she was careful to not answer the phone. He called two times the next day and left messages for Joan to call. She didn't return his calls. Each day he called and left messages. She kept her promise to herself and did not call him back.

During the second week, while Dave was in San Francisco at his next football game, Joan finished writing the article. She read it through several times trying to decide if it was good enough to give to him. She knew she was not an objective reporter, and she needed to get a second opinion.

On Saturday morning, she called Cindy and asked if she could come over and talk to her for a while. When she got to the house, both boys were in their beds taking a nap. When Cindy opened the door, she escorted Joan in to the family room. She gave her a long hug.

"Are you all right, Joan? We've been trying to reach you. Dave is nearly frantic worrying about you. He's been ranting and raving like a madman. What happened between you? All we know is you two had some kind of disagreement, and you won't talk to him or see him. Are you okay?" Cindy asked.

"I don't know how I am. I'm very confused and upset. I came over to ask for your help on the article. I have it finished, but I need to get someone else's opinion before I deliver it to Dave. I know I am not objective, especially when it comes to Dave. Would you read it and let me know what you think? I need someone to honestly tell me what is good and bad about it. What needs to be added, corrected, deleted or changed? I used to have a great revision partner, but she's happily married in Texas, and I need an honest opinion right now! Please just read it and tell me honestly what you think about it," Joan begged.

"I'd be glad to do it. I'm not very objective when it comes to Dave either, but I'll read it and give you my honest opinion. What do you want me to check?" Cindy asked.

"First, does it make sense? Does it explain who Dave really is? I think the facts are all accurate, but is it written so that others can see him and appreciate him the way we do?"

Joan handed the article to Cindy. Cindy tucked her feet underneath her and began reading. She read it through carefully; then she began again at the beginning and re-read it. When she finished reading it and looked up at Joan, there were tears in her eyes.

"Joan, this is so beautiful! You totally captured the real Dave Allen. You told me things I didn't know about him. I completely understood it, and I think anyone who reads it will understand who he is and why he has been so successful. It gives a lot of information, but it is more than just facts. It tells who he really is and why he has done so well. I loved the parts about his relationship with his teammates. The quotation about his linemen filled my heart with joy. When did he say this? 'I may be the quarterback, but without my offensive linemen, I would not be able to accomplish anything. They protect me, support me, and give me the time to complete my passes. Without our outstanding pass receivers, no one would even know my name. I am just one member of this team, but all of the great players I work with are the real reason for my success!'"

"Dave's said that more than once to me, but I wrote it down when he was talking to Coach Thompson in Florida. He really cares about each one of the players. One thing I've learned about Dave is he really cares about people, all kinds of people. "

"There is one thing that is obvious to me. You're in love with Dave, and I know he's in love with you!" Cindy said.

"Is it that obvious? I do love him with all my heart. I love him so much it hurts to be away from him," Joan confessed.

"Then why are you not talking to him? Why have you pulled away?" Cindy asked.

"I really do love him, but he's in love with another woman. He told me that he was in love with a woman, a woman he loves and wants to marry, but she's involved with another man. He's grateful to me, and I know he likes me and wants me, but his heart belongs to someone else. I can't stay around him feeling the way I do and knowing he loves someone else. I decided once this article was done, I am going to have to move again. He is too close, and I am not strong enough to continue seeing him. Next week, I'm giving notice at my job. I'm not sure where I am going from here, but I know I have to leave soon."

"Please, Joan, don't do anything that sudden. You must have misunderstood. I know Dave very well, and he's never mentioned any other woman. If Dave was pining for some woman, Lyle would know it. He's never even hinted Dave was involved with anyone. Ask him about it," Cindy urged.

"Cindy, It really doesn't matter. Things would never work between us anyway. I'd rather leave with his respect than to stay and have him find out about my past and end up ashamed of me. I couldn't stand seeing disgust or condemnation in his eyes," Joan moaned.

"Please, don't run away. Talk to Lyle. He knows Dave better than anyone. Don't give up on all you've worked for here in Los Angeles. Don't move. Keep in touch with me. I promise I won't tell Dave where you are. Is there anything you want me to tell Dave when I see him? Is there any way I can help you?" Cindy asked.

"Just tell him that I'll always remember him and thank him for trusting me to do this article. The article is his now to do with as he pleases. I am giving up all my rights to it. Any money it earns, he can keep or give it to his favorite charity. It's ironic, but thanks to the advance he gave me for the article, I'll have enough money to move and get a small apartment somewhere," Joan said finally. "Come to think of it, Cindy, please don't tell Dave anything, not even about my leaving. I need to see him one last time, give him the article, and say goodbye."

"I want to keep in contact with you. I really hoped we would be friends forever. Is there any way I can contact you? I promise I won't tell Dave where you are," Cindy asked.

"I will miss you and Lyle and your boys so much. I hate saying goodbye to you. When I get settled, I will let you know where I am. Just keep it a secret from Dave," Joan said as she walked away from Cindy and got into her car.

On Monday, after giving notice at her job, Joan began sorting out and cleaning her apartment, getting ready for the move. She didn't have much, but she decided to get rid of as much as possible so moving would be easier. She bundled up some clothing, dishes, books, and other household decorations, and took them to the Salvation Army store. She called and gave 30 day notice to the apartment manager. She returned library books, cancelled the satellite TV service, and the utilities to be turned off the following Friday.

"Even if it costs me an extra half month's rent, I'm going to leave in the middle of the month. That gives me plenty of time to get the rest packed and for me to get out of town. Of course, first I have to figure out where I'm going. Maybe I can find a smaller city without an NFL team," she thought bleakly.

The next week crawled by. Having given her notice at work, Cindy was busy training her replacement. She asked her replacement to say that Joan had quit and didn't leave any forwarding information, when, or if, Dave called. He called on Wednesday, and, with Joan sitting next to her, she delivered Joan's message. She repeated it again and then hung up.

"That guy sounded really upset. You should talk to him," she said.

"I know. I'll talk to him before I leave, but I want to wait a few days before I see him," Joan said. "I just don't want him showing up here at work and causing a scene."

On Sunday morning, Joan called Cindy and said, "I want to come to see you and the game and feel like part of the team again, but I'm afraid I might run into Dave. I'm nearly all packed up and should be leaving in a day or two. I will always remember you and Lyle and the boys. You welcomed me and made me feel so happy. I'm going to miss you so much. I still haven't given the article to Dave, but I will do that before I leave. I feel like I'm leaving half of my heart here. After I'm gone, you can tell Dave anything I've shared with you, if you want to. By then, I'll be gone. One day, I will call you and Lyle, after I'm settled in my new location, and after Dave is married to the other woman. I'm sure when he gets married, it will be in all the papers. I wish you, Lyle, Dave, and all the team the best of everything good. I love you all," Joan said before hanging up.

Since her TV service was disconnected, she decided to listen to the game on the radio. She could picture the scene as the announcers talked before the game. Closing her eyes, she almost smelled the popcorn and hot dogs being sold in the stands. She imagined Cindy sitting in the box. Joan wondered if Davey was with her or if she was sitting alone. Not remaining friends with Cindy was another reason Joan felt so sad about moving.

According the sportscasters, Dave was not starting the game that day, because his shoulder was still sore. He had been practicing a little, and they expected he would come in and run some plays, depending on how the game was going and how his shoulder was feeling. Joan could imagine him pacing up and down the sidelines, shouting encouragement to his teammates while feeling frustrated to be out of the action. The Raiders were famous for being a rough, hard hitting team. They were rated one of the best defensive teams in the league. The announcers said that the Rams would probably struggle offensively since Dave was not starting.

The first quarter proved the announcers had been right. The Raiders had stopped the Rams on the first four drives. Luckily, the Rams were able to keep the Raiders from getting into the end zone on two of their drive. The third drive ended with a field goal and the fourth was a touchdown after they intercepted a pass thrown by the replacement quarterback. The quarter ended Rams 0, Raiders 10.

The second quarter started like the first. The Raiders were playing outstanding defensive football. When the Rams had managed to get to the Raiders 36 yard line, the Ram's coach called a timeout. Dave put on his helmet and went in for a series of plays. The first play was a run down the middle for a five yard gain. The second was a sweep around the left end of the line for a first down. On the next play, Dave dropped back for a pass. He looked for an open receiver downfield, but they were all covered. He waited and decided to pass to a receiver on the right sideline. When he raised his arm to pass, he was blindsided by a Raider defender who had fought his way through the line. Dave was caught off guard when the defender tackled him. He landed heavily on Dave's body crushing his right shoulder into the ground.

When Joan heard the announcer describe his fall, Joan screamed. "No, please God, don't let him be injured again."

The sportscasters reported that Dave was still down on the field and that the coach and trainers were at his side. They signaled for a stretcher to be brought out. After a few minutes, he was carried off the field and taken into the dressing room. It seemed like an hour before the sportscasters reported that Dave had been taken to the hospital. No one knew the extent of his injuries yet, but he was in severe pain.

Joan sat by the radio praying that they would give a report on his condition, but it wasn't until late in the last quarter that they announced that he had gone straight into the hospital operating room for emergency surgery on his shoulder.

Joan was frantic for news. She tried calling Cindy's cell phone number, but it kept going straight to her message box. Every half hour, she tried calling again. She paced nervously while waiting to hear how he was doing. When the game ended, the Raiders had beaten the Rams, but no one had news about Dave. It was nearly 5 pm when Joan finally got through to Cindy. She and Lyle were at the hospital. Cindy had turned her telephone off because of the hospital's rules. She had gone outside to get some fresh air and was checking her messages when Joan called her again. Joan was nearly frantic when Cindy finally answered her cell phone. Joan's hands were shaking and her voice quavered with nervousness.

"Cindy, how is Dave?" she asked anxiously. "I was listening to the game and heard he was hurt. How is he doing? Did he have surgery? Tell me whatever you know, please," Joan begged.

"Slow down, Joan. I can only answer one question at a time. We don't really know much yet. He re-injured his shoulder, only this time, it's a lot worse. He has a torn his cartilage, broken his collar bone, and there are some bone fragments that need to be removed. I think that's what the doctor told us. Dave's in severe pain. He's worried and hurting. You could see it in his eyes. He is frustrated, angry, and scared. The doctors said there was a chance he may never get full use of his shoulder again after such a severe injury. You could see the spark go out of his eyes after that. He was rushed into surgery, but they haven't finished the operation yet. I've never seen him look so upset about anything, except the way he's been since you stopped talking to him. He asked about you today. It broke my heart to tell him I didn't know where you were or how to contact you. He told me you had quit your job and had not returned his calls. He's a broken man now. First, he's lost you, and now he may have lost his ability to play football again," Cindy sobbed.

"Please call me as soon as you hear anything about him, Cindy. Here is my cell phone number 555-600-1515. I'll be waiting to hear from you," Joan said.

"What he needs right now is you, Joan. Please think about coming to see him after he is out of surgery. I know it would mean the world to him," Cindy urged her. "He has lost the will to fight and is really depressed. I know hearing from you would really help him. He needs all the friends he has to rally around him."

"I'm not sure if a call from me would hurt him or help him, the way things are between us right now. Maybe the other woman will realize she loves him and will rush to his side. Please call me when you find out anything. I'll be praying for him. Thanks," Joan said.

Just before noon the next day, Joan's cell phone rang. When she answered it, she heard Cindy's voice on the line.

"Joan, I don't have complete information yet, but he survived the surgery. He's out of the recovery room and is in Room 217. He is still under heavy sedation, but he's awake and talking. Well, actually, he is able to talk, but he has pretty well shut down. He talked briefly to Lyle, but mostly he just stares at the hospital wall. It's like he's given up. He's down and defeated. I've never seen him like this before. I'm really worried about him," Cindy reported.

"Oh, Cindy, I'm so sorry to hear that. He can't just give up. Football means so much to him. Maybe if we give him a little time, he'll be back to his normal self," Joan said.

"Do you really believe that?" Cindy asked. "I thought you really knew and loved Dave. This is the worst he's ever been. He's been hit too hard by life right now. He's lost too much. I hope you are right, but I don't believe he is going to get better unless he gets some hope back. That's what he needs right now: hope, encouragement, and love," Cindy declared.

"Please call me when you learn more." Joan said. "I wish there was more that I can do, but. with things the way they are between us now, I don't know what else to do."

"If you really care about him, why don't you come down and talk to him yourself? You're the only one he wants or needs to see or talk to right now. What are you going to do about it? That's what a friend would do!" she snapped angrily.

"I don't know. I'll talk to you later," Joan answered miserably.

## Chapter 24

All afternoon Joan paced and wondered what she should do. More than anything, she wanted to go to Dave and confess her love and explain why she had to go away. Joan argued with herself. "If I go see him, I'm afraid I won't be able to say goodbye. I need to give him the article and try to get him to understand. Later today, I will go to visit him. I'll give him the article and try to encourage him and cheer him up. I don't know what else I can do to help him without destroying myself," Joan decided.

Joan placed the copy of her article in a large manila envelope with a signed release form giving him all rights to publish the article whenever and wherever he chooses and relinquishing all her rights to money for its publication. Since she wasn't sure how emotional or flustered she might get when she saw him, she also wrote a long letter to him explaining why she had to leave and telling him that she was in love with him, but couldn't stay around knowing he was in love with someone else. She hoped to tell him verbally, but she included the letter just in case she wasn't able to say it out loud;

She showered, brushed her hair, applied her make-up, and drove to the hospital. Except for the VA hospital and the Children's Hospital she went to with Dave, this was the first time she had been in a hospital since she had lost her baby. She shuddered as she entered the hospital building and caught a whiff of the sterile antiseptic smell. It brought back feelings of pain and guilt. She pushed those thoughts away and walked up to Room 217. She hesitated outside the door for a moment to pull her emotions together, and then she gently pulled it open.

Lying in the bed across the room, she saw Dave, yet it didn't really seem to be Dave. He was sunk down, almost as if he had collapsed into himself. He was facing the wall and didn't turn to see who had entered his room. He either didn't care or hadn't heard the hinge creak when she pulled it open.

She stepped inside, closed the door and waited a moment. Finally, she moved a few steps closer and whispered, "Dave, can you hear me? May I come in?"

The body on the bed moved and Dave turned his head to look toward the door. "Is that you, Joan, or am I still dreaming?"

Joan walked over to his bed and smiled shyly, "Yes, it's me. How are you feeling?"

Dave looked at her for a minute before he spoke. "I didn't expect to see you here. I know you don't go to hospitals. Why are you here? Did you want to see me at the lowest point in my life? Why didn't you return my calls? Why have you pulled away? I thought you were my friend and that you cared about me as a person, but a friend wouldn't treat another friend the way you've treated me. What did I do to hurt you and drive you away? How could you just leave without a word of explanation? All I did was love you," he roared.

"Please, Dave, settle down. You shouldn't get upset, especially not right after surgery. I do care about you, more than you know. That's why I came here now. I'm so sorry you got hurt again."

"I don't want or need your pity. I don't want pity from anyone, especially not from you," he spat out.

"I didn't come here to pity you. You're doing a good enough job of that yourself. I wanted to see you and give you the article. I finished it and wanted to give it to you. I don't know if you'll like it or not, but I did the best I could," she said humbly.

"I don't care about the article. I don't care about anything now. I just don't understand how you could desert me and walk away without a word. I trusted you, Joan. I feel so hurt and deserted right now. I don't know if I'll ever play football again. It seems like everything I love has been taken away from me, and I don't even know why," he groaned.

"I know you're feeling hurt and scared. You are angry, and I can understand that. I swear to you that I never meant to hurt you. I care for you so much, Dave. I don't want to say goodbye like this. I wanted us to always be friends. I never meant to hurt you. I'd never do that to you, but I guess some things cannot be changed. I hope you get well and play ball and find that special someone to love. You deserve the best"

Dave turned his face to the wall so she wouldn't see the tears running down his face. He wanted to make up, but he couldn't get past the pain and fear in his heart.

Joan put the envelope on the stand by his bed. She said in a broken voice. "Here's your article. I'm giving it to you. You can do whatever you want with it. I don't want any money for it. If I didn't need the advance money right now, I'd give it all back, too. Maybe sometime later, I can return it to you. Thanks for trusting me to do the article. It meant a lot to me. So do you, Dave. Thanks for everything. I'll pray for you to be healed and to have a happy life. Good bye, my very special friend," she said and walked silently out of the room.

For many minutes, Dave lay there and let the tears run down his face. When he heard the door open again, he quickly wiped the tears away and looked over to see Lyle and Cindy walk inside. They pushed the door shut and walked over to sit beside his bed.

Cindy looked down and saw the envelope on the stand. She saw Dave's red eyes and sighed. "Well, did you and Joan make up? I see she left you the article. What did you think about it? I thought it was wonderful."

"I didn't read it. She gave it to me, but I really don't care about reading it. I thought she was my friend, but I was mistaken. She never really cared about me!" he snapped.

Cindy looked at him with anger in her eyes. "I never thought I'd ever say this to you, but, Dave Allen, you are a blind, stupid fool, if you really believe that! Did you just let her walk out of your life? She's the sweetest girl who ever came into your life and she cares very much about you. She cares so much she's leaving town to keep from hurting you anymore. Read her article and then tell me she doesn't care! She loves you will all her heart. You are a fool to let her leave now when she's hurting as much, maybe even more than you. Why don't you read what this person who doesn't care about you wrote?" Cindy dared as she stomped out of the room.

Lyle shook his head, "Good grief, what was that all about? Cindy shouldn't have spoken to you like that, not with you still hurt, but I have to agree with Cindy. I think she's right about Joan. She's got a good heart, and I've seen the way she looks at you. She's in love with you. I thought you were smart enough to know that. Stop laying there feeling sorry for yourself and read the article. Cindy told me all about it. She's in love with you. Cindy's told me enough about Joan and her past to know that I would never let her leave me like this," Lyle said as he left to find Cindy.

Dave picked up the envelope and started reading the article. He read it slowly, savoring all the things she had included. He was touched by how well Joan had understood him, how she had captured his real feelings and understood his thoughts. She had blended in his football career facts and his personal relationships in such a way that he did not feel his privacy had been invaded. He felt her warm love speaking through each sentence. For the first time, he realized how much Joan understood and loved him.

As he was trying to put the article back in the envelope, he noticed a couple of papers tucked inside. He scanned the Release of Publication Rights form and put it on the table. Finally, he pulled out a handwritten letter from Joan. His hand shook as he started to read it.

"My Dearest Dave, I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me someday for being such a coward. The weeks since we met have been the happiest time of my life. During that time I have fallen deeply in love with you. I will always cherish the memory of the week we spent traveling together. Loving you so much, I had to come and see you one last time before I moved away. My prayers and thoughts will always include you. I know you will get better soon and you will be back on the football field again. You are not a quitter. Whatever you choose to do, I know you will be successful. I truly hope you and the woman you are in love with will get together one day very soon, and that you both will be happy. You are truly a wonderful person. You deserve to be happy. I wish I could explain my behavior, but I am afraid you would not understand and would reject me. I am too much of a coward to stay and face that. I cannot stand the thought of seeing disgust or disappointment in your eyes. I pray that you will always be healthy and happy. All my love to you, now and always. I will never forget you, I love you. Joan"

Dave shook his head and re-read it. "I can't believe it. She's in love with me. Why did she pull away? What does she mean I hope you and the woman you love will get married and be very happy? I can't wait until she comes back to see me so I can tell her how much I love her, too."

About this time, Lyle and Cindy walked back into the room. "I'm sorry I yelled at you, Dave, but I can't believe you let her walk away. She was so broken up when I talked to her. She didn't really want to leave, but she couldn't stand thinking about you being in love with someone else," Cindy said.

"I don't know what you are talking about. She wrote something about that, too. What does it mean?" he asked.

"She told me near the end of the week at your house, she was interviewing you and that you told her you had found the woman you wanted to marry, but she was involved with another man and didn't love you the same way. Didn't you say that, because that's what she heard?" Cindy explained.

"I was talking about her and this guy George Adkinson. There isn't any other woman. The only woman I've ever really loved is Joan. When she comes back to visit, I'll straighten this out. I've got to find her and make her understand that. You know how much I love playing football. Well, I could live without ever being able to play again, but the thought of living without Joan makes my life meaningless. What can I do? Is she coming back to see me again?" he asked desperately.

"No, she's quit her job, has packed her apartment, and is moving in a day or two. That's what she told me. Last night when I talked to her, she wasn't sure where she was going, but it was probably to another state. She said she was coming to give you the article and say goodbye," Cindy cried.

Cindy tried to call Joan's cell phone, but it didn't ring. Dave called her apartment phone, but a recording said it had been disconnected.

"I don't know where to start. I never did find out where she really lives. When I took her home, she got out at an apartment building where she had never lived. God, help me! How can I find her?" he moaned.

Lyle took out his wallet and began pulling out all the little scraps of paper inside it. Finally he said, "I think I can help you find her."

"How? Did she give you her address?" Dave asked.

"No, but the night she saved your life, I walked her to her car. After she drove away, I wrote down her license plate number. I have a buddy who works in the police department. He might be able to get her current address for me from the DMV files. Let me make a couple of phone calls," Lyle said.

Cindy came over and held Dave's hand. "Don't worry, we'll find her some way!"

## Chapter 25

Dave fretted and stewed all night long waiting to hear from Lyle. Early the next morning, Lyle rushed in to his hospital room. He held up a paper in his hand, "We got it. The DMV has her current address, and it is in the same area as the Lincoln Arms Apartment building," he shouted.

Dave grabbed it and quickly rang for the nurse. When she came in, he said, "I need my clothes. I'm leaving this hospital as soon as I can get dressed."

"You can't leave now. You had surgery less than 48 hours ago. We can't let you leave," she protested.

"Legally, you can't keep me here if I demand to be released. I am demanding you to get my clothes so I can leave," he countered.

"I'll get the doctor," she fussed.

"Great, then he can sign my release papers," Dave said.

Cindy and Lyle both tried to stop him, but he said, "I'm okay now. I can get medical treatment after I get Joan back. Until that happens, I won't rest until I've found her. Help me get ready, please."

Despite the doctor's protests, Dave got dressed and left against medical advice. Lyle and Cindy drove him to the address the DMV had provided. When they got there, he saw an old blue VW beetle parked in the apartment building parking area. Lyle and Cindy offered to go with him, but Dave insisted on going in to see Joan alone. After getting out of the car, Dave said, "If I'm not back in 30 minutes, leave me here so I can talk to her. If I can't find her, I'll be back in a couple of minutes. Wish me luck," Dave said before going into the apartment building.

Dave walked into the lobby. He checked the mailboxes and found one labeled George Adkinson. With a grim look of determination, Dave walked up the stairs and knocked loudly on the door. When the door opened, Joan stood in the doorway. He pushed past her into the room.

"Where is he?" he shouted.

"Who?" Joan asked.

"George! George Adkinson," he snapped.

"How do you know about George? How did you find me? What are you doing here? You should be in the hospital," she said frantically.

"I found you through your car registration. I'm here to talk to you and to shake some sense into that beautiful head of yours," Dave said.

Joan led him over to sit on the sofa. Dave sat down and grabbed Joan's arm and pulled her down on his lap.

"Dave, your shoulder! Be careful, I don't want you to get hurt again," she said, trying to lean away from his injured shoulder.

"You silly fool! Don't you realize I love you too much to ever let you get away from me now? I don't care what's between you and George. I love you, and I'm going to do everything I can to make you love me, only me. I don't care about your past. I love you just the way you are. I need you, Joan. Without you, my life is empty and meaningless. Nothing could ever make me turn away from you. I think I've loved you from the first night we met. I knew that night at the Sand Trap that you were lying to me about where you lived. I felt hurt and angry that you didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth. Please, Joan, don't lock me out of your life. I love you so much. I don't care about your past, although I want you to share it with me, because it is a part of you. No secrets. Just love me and trust my love for you. I want you now and forever. I want to marry you and spend all of my life loving you. I'm offering you a present and a future, although I don't know what my future will be. I may never be the star quarterback again. The fame and wealth may be gone, but I'll always love you," he said fiercely.

"Dave, I never cared about the fame or money. You are all I care about—your happiness and your health. I don't care what kind of work you do. I don't need lots of money to be happy. Whatever you do, I'll be there to help you. You are all I need."

"If that's really true, then say you'll marry me, because all I really want or need is you. Please tell me what has been bothering you all these years," he ordered gently.

"I'm afraid, Dave," she cried.

"Don't be afraid. I'm here and I'll always love you. Tell me, please," he repeated. He pulled her down beside him and held her hand.

Slowly, quietly she began talking. "I don't really know where to begin. At your parent's house, I told you about my father and my time in foster homes. There was a lot more to the story that I left out. When I was 17, the foster home I was in was awful. I would have done almost anything to get away from my foster father and his roving hands, but that's another story. I was barely sixteen when I met Larry. He transferred into my high school. I don't know why, but we were drawn to each other. He'd had a hard life, too; and he was a loner, like me. He was kind and gentle, somewhat shy, and he made me feel special. For the first time since my father had died, someone cared about me. I was so happy. One night my foster father tried to rape me. I ran to the only person I knew who cared. We were both too young, but we decided to elope and get married. We thought everything would be 'happily ever after'," Joan said. Dave wiped tears from her face and waited for her to continue.

"We had practically no money, no one to help us, but we managed to get a small apartment and set up housekeeping. It was tiny, but it was all ours. Less than two months later, he got his draft notice. Two weeks later, he was gone. We struggled to make ends meet. Just before he left for boot camp, I learned I was pregnant. He was so happy about it. While he was gone, I continued working as a waitress. With his allotment checks and my salary, I was able to make it. A few months after he had been shipped out to Vietnam, I was informed by the Army that the hill he had been defending had been overrun by the Viet Kong, and he was missing in action and presumed to be dead," Joan began to cry. Dave pulled her against his chest and gently stroked her hair.

"Something went wrong with the Army paperwork. The allotment checks stopped coming. I called and called, but never got an answer. I started working two jobs and took on extra shifts to earn enough money to live. As the pregnancy progressed, it became harder to work. I was so emotionally upset. I stopped sleeping or eating regular meals. Time just passed by me. I was in some kind of emotional fog. I wasn't really living; I merely existed from one meaningless day to the next one. Days blended together and I moved through life like a robot," Joan continued.

Dave shifted her weight and pulled her down to sit beside him on the sofa. He held her close to his body and encouraged her to continue.

"One night at the truck stop, I felt dizzy and hot. I guess I passed out. When I woke up, I was in the hospital. It was all white, and I was nearly dead. It was some kind of massive infection. Because I was so malnourished and so exhausted physically, I nearly died. After a week, I came to and learned that I had miscarried. The doctor said if I had taken better care of myself and come to see him sooner, the baby probably wouldn't have died. Without meaning to, I had killed my baby. I don't really know how I survived the raw guilt of that, but I did. The allotment checks began coming in. With the back checks, I moved to Austin and completed accounting and computer classes. I met a girl at school, and we shared an apartment for nearly two years." Dave wiped her tears away and kissed her cheek.

"It was about six months months later; I got a telegram saying Larry had been liberated from a primitive, brutal POW camp in the jungle. When he was shipped to the states, he was put into a VA Hospital in Dallas. I visited with him there as much as I could. They kept him in the hospital for several months. One day, the Army chaplain called and said they would be releasing him in two weeks. My roommate had just gotten married, so I got ready to welcome him back."

"They delivered him to my apartment door and left him there with me. Dave, I recognized him from the hospital, but, in every way, he was a stranger to me. I don't just mean his appearance, although he looked like a 50 year old man. He was sullen and withdrawn. I never heard him laugh, and I rarely saw him smile. He never talked to me about anything, although he did usually answer when spoken to. I tried to reach him, to show him I loved him, but he shrank back from any contact. I was never able to reach him emotionally or physically," Joan paused and sighed. "Often at night, he would wake up shouting, sweat pouring from him. His eyes were wild as if he were seeing some unseen terror. Sometimes after the dream, he would lie quietly in my arms, but even that stopped. I really tried. I lived with him, but I wasn't part of his world anymore," Joan continued.

"That sounds like Post Traumatic Stress Disorder," Dave said.

"I learned about that later," Joan agreed. "One day I came home and found all the gas jets turned on. I called an ambulance, and they were able to revive him. He started seeing a psychiatrist and was put on medication. I didn't find out until much later, but he stopped going for his counseling sessions, and he stopped taking his medicine. I only learned that afterwards." Joan began trembling violently. Dave held her close, gently kissing her and rocking her until the shaking subsided.

Joan struggled to regain control of her voice and then continued, "One evening I came home from work to find police at my door. From what they said, Larry had suffered a severe flashback to his POW days. He had been secretly gathering together guns and ammunition, and he had gone out hunting 'the enemy'. He didn't know what he was doing. The Larry I married was a happy, gentle, loving man. He would never do anything to hurt other people, but he went down to the University of Texas campus, climbed up to the top of a bell tower, and opened fire on anyone who walked into his area. Before he finally shot himself, he had killed ten people and wounded fifteen others. Overnight, I became famous, or rather infamous. The TV reporters hounded me. They staked out my apartment and shoved cameras and microphones in my face whenever I went outside. I was the woman whose husband had shot all those people. The way the press hounded me, it seemed like I was responsible for all the deaths and tragedy. Everywhere I went people pointed at me, stared and whispered about me. I got terrible, angry sick phone calls. I got death threats. I'd never felt such anger and hatred. Finally, I couldn't' take it anymore. One day, I just packed my bags and left everything behind. I changed back to my maiden name, and I've been running away from the shame of my past ever since. I kept all the pain and fear inside. My greatest fear was that I would be discovered and the hate would start again. That's why I was so terrified when I saw the reporters."

Dave held her close and whispered, "My precious love, how I wish I had known this a long time ago. I could have helped you bear this terrible burden." When her crying subsided, Joan looked up at him. She searched his eyes, but only saw love and concern in them.

"Don't you realize you can't run away from your past, because you are still carrying the memories and pain with you? Let me carry some of that. You were not to blame for any of the things that happened to you. You and Larry and all the other veterans of that war were victims of that war, just like Jesse. It was not your fault that your baby died. You did all you were capable of doing. I know you well enough to know that you would never intentionally harm anyone, especially a baby. Now that you've told me about this, you must accept it for what it is—the past. Let go of the guilt, the pain and the fear. It's time for you to bury the pain and guilt of the past so we can go on and build a new life together," he soothed her as she cried.

"Now, come, Joan, dry your eyes. Say you'll marry me. I want to spend the rest of my life with you," Dave said.

"I didn't think you loved me. You always pulled back. When you told me you were already in love with someone, but she was involved with another man, I knew I had to leave you so you could be with her," Joan confessed.

"Silly, that was you. I wanted you to tell me the truth. It took every ounce of self-control to let you go once I kissed you and felt you pressed against my body. I wanted you, I needed you so much I ached, but I wanted all of you. It drove me crazy thinking of you leaving me to go home to George. I felt jealous enough to want to kill him. My only hope was that if you really loved George, you wouldn't have returned my kisses the way you did. What is there between you and George?" he asked tensely.

"I can't believe you knew about George and didn't ask me about him. He's been very useful to me the last few years," she answered.

"Please don't make me suffer any longer. Please, Joan, tell me that you don't love him. I want to marry you. I want to be the only man in your life, the only one to love you and protect you. I want to marry you and have you with me always," he moaned brokenly.

"No one's ever been jealous because of me. It is flattering, in a way, but I can't let you go on thinking the worst. You are totally wrong about George. George is not a real person. He is my pseudonym, the name I use for my writing. I submit my articles under his name. Most publishers think he's real. I even have a bank account under his name. I've used a pen name to keep people from connecting my writing to my past."

"What about your answering machine? It said you and George were busy and one of you would return the call when you were free?" he asked.

"Well, since George isn't real, I always called back. That was easier than explaining it over and over. I guess you could call me George. There has never been any man in my life except Larry and you. After I gave you my phone number, I stopped using the recording. How did you call me before that?" Joan asked. She looked over at Dave and waited for him to answer her question.

"Actually, I was calling George. After I read the articles you told me about in Sunset Magazine, I saw his name, but I couldn't find yours, I called the magazine and conned them into giving me George's number. I hoped to find out what his connection was to you. When your voice came on the answer machine recording, I assumed that you lived together. It nearly killed me thinking of you going home to George each time we parted. I was already deeply in love with you. I decided I had to find a way to win your love. That was the real reason for the article and our trip to Florida. I needed time to be near you to win your love. Now that I've read the beautiful article you wrote, I may even let you submit it. The trip was perfect, but I was trapped in my own words. 'Strictly business,' I came to hate those words. I had promised to keep it on a business level, but every time I felt you near me, I wanted to make love to you. A few times, I know it nearly got out of control. Pulling away from you that night in the spa was the hardest thing I ever did. When I heard you crying afterwards, I was afraid I had scared you away. I had to keep you physically at a distance after that, because I didn't trust myself to be able to stop. Please tell me, did I succeed in winning your love?" he whispered.

"It looks like you got a package deal. George and me, and yes we both love you," she said with a deep chuckle.

"You're the prettiest package deal in the world. Well, I guess I should get down on one knee for this." When he struggled to move, Joan pulled him back down beside her. "George and Joan, will you marry me and make me the happiest man alive?" he asked. Joan looked in his eyes and saw love reflected in them.

She put her arms around his neck and kissed him and asked with a teasing expression, "What about the woman you told me you loved and wanted to marry?" Joan asked.

"I've just asked her to marry me, but she still hasn't said yes," he answered.

"Well, I know I love you and want to marry you. Will I do?" she asked.

"Yes, my darling Joan, you'll do very well. I love you so much. Please take me home and never leave me again. There's a lifetime of sunsets to watch together, starting from today and on until forever," he whispered against her forehead. "Joan, please take me home, to our house. I'm feeling shaky and am beginning to hurt a lot. Just bring what you need for now. Will you come and stay with me now? I'd love to have you take care of me and my shoulder. I'll get someone to get this stuff moved out of here and to my house or storage. I just need you near me. Please, say you'll come home with me now," Dave begged.

"I'll go wherever you want me to go, Dave. You are all I care about. Let me grab a suitcase. I have until the end of the month to clean out the apartment. Let's get you home and back in bed or maybe you should you go back to the hospital," Joan said anxiously.

"Home with you, that's where I want to be. I'm sorry I'm so banged up, I want to take care of you for a change," Dave said.

## Chapter 26

Joan carried her suitcase down to her car. She put her arm around Dave's waist and helped him down the stairs. He held her close and leaned against her. She opened the car door and he got inside. Dave put his head back and closed his eyes while Joan drove to Dave's house. When she got there, she knocked on the door. Mrs. Jensen opened it quickly. Joan asked her to get Dave's bed ready for him to get into.

"Thank God, he's with you. All I knew was he checked himself out of the hospital, and no one knew where he had gone. He's been worried sick about you the last two weeks. Are you okay?" she asked.

'Everything between us is fine now, but Dave is weak and needs some TLC and medicine. It's a long story. We finally admitted we were hopelessly in love with each other, and we are going to get married when he gets well. In the meantime, I'm going to stay here and take care of him. I don't imagine he's had much to eat, and I'm sure he needs some liquids. Will you fix something light for him to eat while I get him inside and settled in his bed. He doesn't want to go to the hospital now, so we need to get him to rest and recuperate here," Joan explained quickly.

Mrs. Jensen rushed to get something for Dave to eat and drink. Joan walked over, opened his car door, and helped him get out. He was leaning more heavily on Joan as he walked down the hall to his bedroom. She lowered him down to sit on the edge of his bed. Quickly she removed his shoes and socks. She unbuttoned his shirt. When she saw the bandage around his shoulder and arm had some fresh blood on it, she got a pair of scissors and quickly cut his shirt off. She removed his slacks and laid him back down on the bed. Joan rushed into the bathroom, got a clean washrag, wet it with warm water, and brought it back to the bed. Gingerly, she wiped the blood way. She called Lyle and asked for the phone number of the team doctor or trainer. She called the team doctor and explained That Dave was at his house. She described what she saw. The doctor said he would come right over and check on Dave. Dave smiled when she returned and sat beside him. Mrs. Jensen brought in a tray with a bowl of rich stew, a sandwich, a large glass of milk, and a pitcher of water.

"How are you feeling, Dave?" she asked. "If you can think of anything you'd prefer to eat or drink, I'll gladly fix it for you."

Dave smiled at her and said, "I'm all right. I'm just tired and, now that I think of it, I'm hungry, too. I'll be okay now. Joan's here and she's not going to leave me again. We're going to get married," he announced with a grin.

Mrs. Jenson smiled and said, "It's about time!"

After he finished eating, Mrs. Jensen took the tray back to the kitchen. She washed the dishes and got ready to leave.

She walked down to Dave's bedroom, "Do you need anything else before I leave for the night? It's so wonderful to have you back here, Joan. I'm so happy that you two are getting married. You deserve all the best in life," she congratulated them before she left. About fifteen minutes after Mrs. Jensen left, Joan heard a car drive up to the house. She hurried down and met the team doctor at the front door. She quickly led him down to Dave's bedroom. The doctor removed the bandage and checked on the stitches. He carefully removed the bandage, cleaned the wound area with a sterile solution and put on a new bandage.

"Dave, you really should be in the hospital," he said. "There is always danger of infection after surgery. You need to be very careful," he said.

"Doc, I couln't stay there andy longer. There was something I needed to do that couldn't be done from there. I promise I will be very careful. My housekeeper and my fiancee will look after all my needs. I know I can rest and recuperate better here with their help than I could in the hospital will all the activity there. I'll do anything you tell me to do, except leave my house. I promise that I'll behave and will call you if anything changes," Dave said.

"I know you get restless. I'll let you try recuperating at home, but only if you call me if there is any sign of redness or fever. I'll check in with you tomorrow. I'm leaving a few prescription pain pills so you can get sleep. If anything changes, call me""

"Will you keep it quiet that I'm here at my house? So many people were dropping in at the hospital, I just couldn't get any rest. I promise I'll behave. Joan and Mrs. Jensen won't let me get away with anything," he added with a grin.

After the doctor left, Joan walked back into Dave's bedroom. She gently sat down on the edge of the bed. She smiled down at him. "How are you feeling now, Dave?

"Physically, I feel like I got run over by a truck. I may need one of those pills so I can sleep, but emotionally I feel a hundred times better than I have since you stopped talking to me or seeing me. I was so worried, and I didn't know how to find you.. I don't ever want to be away from you again."

"I hated being away from you. I missed you and wanted to be with you. I'm so thankful that we finally talked and made up. I love you so much," Joan whispered.

Dave looked at Joan and sighed, "Will you stay here and sleep with me tonight? All I need to get well is you and rest. Please don't ever leave me alone again."

"I'll stay right here with you. Now, close your eyes and try to sleep. I'll go lock the doors, turn off the lights, and come to bed. You need to rest. I know you overdid it today. You just had major surgery; you should still be in the hospital. If you don't rest, I'll have to call the ambulance and get you re-admitted," she threatened.

Dave's head dropped down on his pillow as the pain pill began to take effect. Joan leaned over him and gently kissed his lips. She walked around the house, checking the doors to be sure they were locked. She turned off the lights and hurried back to Dave's bedroom. She dug through her suitcase and found a nightgown. She undressed and carefully crawled into the huge bed near him. She looked at his sleeping face and thanked God for bringing them together. Sometime later, Joan awoke and felt Dave's hand resting on her waist. She looked over and saw he was watching her.

She smiled and moved over closer to him. She snuggled up next to him, and Dave sighed happily. "I've dreamed about this moment so many times. Now that you are here with me, my body is too hurt to hold you the way I want," he apologized. "I still want to touch you and make love to you."

"Well, until your shoulder is stronger, you will have to wait for part of that wish. You aren't physically able to love me, but I can love you, if you want me to," she whispered huskily.

"I want everything you are willing to give me. I love you, Joan," he groaned hoarsely.

Joan pulled the covers back, slid his shorts off, and gazed at the perfection of his body. She slipped off her night gown and moved closer to him. "Whatever you see and want is yours, only for you. I want to touch you, but I'm afraid of hurting you. Promise you'll tell me if anything hurts your shoulder," Joan whispered. She rolled over and began lightly kissing his body. His hands moved hungrily, possessively over her skin. She moaned when she felt his hand reach up and capture her breast in his hand.

She moved down to his stomach area. Her hand sought and captured his firm pulsing organ. She tenderly stroked it and heard him gasp with pleasure. She lowered her head and drew him into the warm moistness of her mouth. She teased it with her tongue and tenderly caressed him. She felt his body begin moving instinctively. Joan caressed him until she felt his body shudder and convulse in a spasm of fulfillment. He sank back on his bed and sighed.

"What magic power you have over my body! I've never felt anything like that before," he growled contentedly. Joan moved closer and laid her head gently on his chest. She heard the rapid beating of his heart. Gradually it slowed to its normal pace. He stroked her hair and gently caressed her face.

"Sleep now, my love; I'll be here when you awaken. Sweet dreams," she whispered as she kissed him tenderly. He sighed and drifted off to sleep. While he slept, she crawled in and moved over to feel his nearness. For the next three days, Joan continued taking tender care of him. He gradually regained his strength. On the third day, the team doctor came and checked Dave over again.

"He's healing well. There is no sign of infection. Just try to keep him from getting up and overdoing things. He needs as much rest time as possible. Whatever you're doing is agreeing with him. Call me if you have any questions or if you need me to come and check on him again," he said as he was leaving.

While Dave was recuperating, he began making mysterious phone calls. Finally Joan asked him, "What are you up to now? I can tell you are up to something. Out with it, Dave, Who have you been calling when I walk out of the room? I thought we weren't going to keep secrets," she playfully scolded him.

"I'm planning our wedding and honeymoon. I feel stronger every day. How about getting married and taking a 'non-business' trip?" he asked with a sly laugh.

Joan laughed when he said 'non-business' trip. She understood exactly what he was thinking. "I'm ready whenever you are, but, first I'm going to check with the doctor to make sure you are well enough for travelling and 'non-business activities," she said with a giggle.

Later that day, Joan called the team doctor and asked him if he thought taking a trip would hurt Dave.

"Whatever you've been doing, must be working. He's getting stronger. There's no sigh of infection. A change of scenery might even help him begin to get out and do some walking. As far as any other physical activity, his body will let him know if it is too strenuous. Just don't let him do lifting or things that might re-injure his shoulder," the doctor cautioned.

Joan hung up the telephone and walked back to where Dave was resting in his bedroom. "When do you want to leave?" Joan asked. "The doctor said it was all right for you to travel and do some physical activity," she added with a smile and a blush.

"Very soon, but there are a couple of things I want to get done before we leave. Have you and Cindy ever gone shopping together?" he asked.

"No, but we've talked about it. Why do you ask?" Joan inquired curiously.

"I want her to go shopping with you while you get some things for the trip," he said.

After Joan went to the kitchen, he called Cindy. "Cindy, this is Dave, do you have time to go shopping with Joan. We are going away to get married and have a short honeymoon. I need someone to go with her and help her pick out wedding rings and a bunch of new clothes for a trip to Florida. I know her; she's not going to want to spend my money. If I give you the cash, will you get her fixed up to go? Don't use my name when shopping. I don't want the press hounding us. We'll try to slip away without them noticing. I'd like to be ready to leave day after tomorrow. Do you think you could do it?"

"I'd love to do it. You know me, I don't mind buying clothes or jewelry! Do you have a budget amount for the ring? I know a couple of nice, but reasonably priced, jewelers. Just tell me when and I'll get a sitter and be over to pick her up," Cindy bubbled.

"I'll let you two set the time. Thanks, Cindy, for this and for getting me to see what a mistake I was making. I'll never forget your help," he said.

When Cindy arrived, Dave handed her a thick business envelope and a piece of paper. "Here's $20,000 for the ring and clothes. I made a list of some of the things I'd like to see her get. She's had to scrimp all her life. From now on, I'm going to give her the world. She might protest, but if she likes something and you do, too, buy it. I can't wait to see her in her new clothes. If she wants a more expensive ring, call me and I'll give you more," he added. He hugged her and sent them off in Cindy's car.

Joan was shocked to learn that she was going shopping for things for herself, and that she wasn't allowed to pay for them. When Cindy pulled up in front of a local jewelry store, Joan said, "What are we doing here?"

"Joan, you can't get married without rings. Dave wants you to pick out anything in the store for your wedding ring and one for him to wear also. Come on, we're going to have fun. Just don't mention his name. He doesn't want reporters to get wind of your marriage. He knows you hate publicity, so he couldn't come with you," she explained. "You're not allowed to look at the prices. He wants you to choose and buy something that you really like."

Joan and Cindy strolled down each display case. Joan selected several rings. The clerk took them out one at a time and Joan tried them on. Finally the choice was between a single heart shaped diamond solitaire ring set in platinum. The other ring was a gold band with three small diamonds surrounded by a cluster of emeralds and rubies. She finally asked Cindy which one she liked best.

"I think they are both stunning. For me, I'd love the gold band with emeralds and rubies, but I think the heart shaped diamond ring is more your style. But, remember this is your ring and your choice. Which one do you want to look at for the rest of your life?" Cindy asked.

""You're right. I like the solitaire better. It symbolizes the love I have for Dave and the love he has for me. It is simpler and more my taste. I'd like that ring," she told the clerk.

They looked over the selection of men's wedding bands. Joan settled on a large white gold band with a simple design engraved along both edges. She chose it and the clerk added the costs together. Cindy went over to the cashier and paid her in cash. They took the rings and went back to Cindy's car. Cindy locked them in the trunk and they headed to a large mall about two miles away. The mall was crowded, but Cindy knew the stores well. She guided Joan from one small store to the other. "No discount stores for this trip, not for things for your wedding and honeymoon," Cindy said.

When they got there, Cindy led Joan along the stores. She showed Joan Dave's neatly printed shopping list. Joan's eyes grew big as quarters at the amount of things he wanted her to buy. "Dave told me, if you didn't choose these, then I am supposed to get them for you. Since you're going to end up with all these things, why not just relax and have fun. You only get married to a man like Dave once in your life. Let's get busy trying on clothes."

Before they were finished and leaving the shopping mall, they had many bags from various stores. One bag held two new swim suits. One was a playful blue and green bikini. The other was a maroon one piece that was cut very low in the front and back. It was sleek and sophisticated and, according to Cindy's words and the clerks approving expression, Joan looked fantastic in it.

Other bags held pairs of capris, shorts, and slacks and tops in several colors and fabrics. There were dresses for day and evening. One especially pretty dress in layers of chiffon over satin draped beautifully over her curves. "This should really set his heart beating faster," Cindy kidded.

Joan blushed when she noticed Dave had included new bras and underwear. They spent time looking at the wide selection of lingerie. Joan was fitted with new bras. She purchased them and added several other personal items. Cindy led her over to a display of nightgowns and peignoirs. With a deep blush, she picked out a couple of pieces. When Joan wasn't looking, Cindy slipped in a couple of sexier things.

Last, they stopped and bought shoes. They got shoes for walking, shoes for lounging, shoes for dancing, and shoes to match some of the outfits they had already bought. The last thing on the list was suitcases (get two new ones for Joan). By the time they were finished, both of them were ready to collapse.

"This has been the best shopping trip of my life," Cindy enthused. "I'm so happy for you and for Dave. I know you are both going to be so happy together. Besides, now we can still be friends since you'll be staying here with Dave. That's the frosting on the cake for me," she laughed happily.

When they got home, Mrs. Jensen hurried out to help bring in the bags. They put them in the guest bedroom so there would be more room to pack. After bringing everything inside, Cindy went in and gave Dave back the envelope and his completed list. "We got everything you listed, and more. Here are the receipts and the rest of the money. You were right, she's so used to shopping conservatively, it was hard to steer her to more expensive things. I believe everything she got was a good purchase and they are things she really liked. What she is most concerned about is how you will like them," Cindy teased him.

Dave looked in the envelope. "You had this much money left?"

"Yes, we did well. I may be an avid shopper, but I'm not a fool with money either. Neither is Joan. You've got a good woman there," she added.

"I know that. I'm the luckiest man alive, next to Lyle," he added giving her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

That afternoon, Mrs. Jensen helped Joan pack her new luggage. She oohed and aahed over the clothes and carefully folded and packed them, while Joan went in and spent the afternoon with Dave. Mrs. Jensen also packed suitcases for Dave. Before she left, everything was packed and ready for them to leave the next day.

Before she walked out, she went over and gave Dave a careful hug and kiss. She hugged Joan and kissed her also. "I wish you both all the best. You two are perfect for each other. May God bless you and keep you safe in his care. May you have a life filled with love and happiness. May the Lord bless you with all the desires of your heart now and always," she quoted an old Irish blessing. Joan hugged her and thanked her again.

## Chapter 27

The next morning, they woke up and got dressed. Dave called a taxi, and they rode to the airport. "Where are we going?" Joan asked suddenly realizing she didn't know what their destination was.

"First, we are going to get married. After that, you and I have a date in a spa in Florida. I've been dreaming about that spa and you since we got back. On Sunday. I'm supposed to be on the sidelines with the team when they play at Tampa Bay. I won't be playing, but I am supposed to be on the field with them. I hope you don't mind, but I want us to spend a few days with Mom and Dad to make up to them for not being at our wedding. After that, we can go wherever you want to go. Just name the place and I'll take you there," Dave promised.

The first jet they boarded was heading for Birmingham, Alabama. Dave and Joan held hands and talked quietly about their hopes and dreams for the future. Once they landed, Dave picked up a rental car he had reserved. They loaded the suitcases in the trunk

Joan said, ""Let me drive so you can rest your shoulder. I really don't mind driving. Hopefully, your shoulder will be well enough for some exercise later tonight," she hinted with a smile.

"I think you have a great idea, Joan. Let me open the other door for you," he said with a laugh. Once out of the airport, Dave directed her to drive to a small town called Columbiana.

"What are we doing here?" she asked.

"I stayed here once when I was a boy. I loved the look and feel of this town. It is almost like walking back in time. The buildings are clean and well-kept, and look at the beautiful tree lined streets. When I was trying to figure out where we could get married, I wanted to choose a quiet, relaxed place where there were no news reporters. I called and got information on getting married here. We will get the license today and get married at a little white country church just down the road tomorrow. Tonight and tomorrow we will stay in a furnished cabin by a small lake. I don't want a bunch of reporters chasing us around. I want you all to myself," Dave added.

After filling out the papers for the marriage license, they walked hand-in-hand through the town. They ate a leisurely lunch in a small cafe. Dave had brought a camera with him. He took pictures of Joan and with many laughs and mistimed efforts, they used the self-timer to take pictures together. That evening, after eating dinner at a local restaurant, they drove to the cabin. It was clean and well-furnished. Although it lacked the luxury of the hotels they had stayed in before, it was a restful, cozy, and peaceful place to spend the night. Joan modeled one of the night gowns she had chosen. He whistled when he saw her walking toward him out of the bathroom. He held her close and kissed her until both were aroused. Dave drew her against him when they were in bed. Joan snuggled with him and showed her love.

The next day, Joan dressed in one of her new sundresses. She smiled when Dave lifted her with his good arm and spun her around the room. "Is that what you're wearing for our wedding?" he asked.

"Is it all right? I thought it was a simple wedding. We don't have family or friends here. It's just us, and this town is so relaxed and homey. I thought it would be appropriate, but I'll be happy to wear anything you want me to wear." Joan added.

"Yes, it's beautiful, honey! You look so beautiful in it. You take my breath away. I love how it sets off your eyes, your sexy body, and your natural beauty. Am I dressed appropriately to marry the most beautiful woman in the world?" he asked.

"You look perfect to me. I love you in anything and nothing. I feel so happy and blessed to be marrying you. Did I tell you today that I love you with all my heart?" she asked.

"Yes, but keep on telling me. I love hearing you say you love me. Come, my beautiful bride, let's go get married," he whispered.

The church was small and old-fashioned. There were gorgeous stained glass windows that changed the plain sunlight into multicolored rainbows. The pastor was a gray haired man in his fifties. Dave gave Joan a small bouquet of tiny white roses as her bridal bouquet. The pastor's wife and secretary acted as witnesses. Dave and Joan repeated their wedding vows. After they exchanged wedding rings, the pastor pronounced them husband and wife, and they kissed for the first time as husband and wife

The witnesses gave each of them a hug, congratulated them, and presented them with their Marriage Certificate. On the way back to the cabin, they stopped and bought some groceries and a bottle of champagne. Since it was still early afternoon, they walked around the lake, holding hands, and kissing dreamily. That evening, they had a 'breakfast dinner' followed by glasses of champagne.

That night, when it was time for bed, Joan put on the pale blue gown Cindy had chosen. It was filmy and lacy. The cream colored lace framed her shoulders making it appear demure and ladylike, but the body of the gown was extremely sheer and showed Joan's body off to perfection. Dave had begun removing his clothes while Joan was changing hers. When Dave looked up and saw her moving towards him, his mouth dropped open and he stared at her. Joan saw Dave's eyes sweeping down her body. He moaned with desire and moved to take her into his arms. He pulled off the rest of his clothes, and rushed to her. He had removed the sling from his shoulder. "Tonight, I am going to do what I've wanted to do since we first met. I am going to make love to you, my beautiful bride, and this time, there will be no pulling back. Come to me, Joan, my amazing wife. I've waited for this moment all my life," he groaned with a voice filled with desire.

Joan walked eagerly into his arms. She molded her body against his. He drew her closer and began kissing her with a passion that left them both breathless. He turned back the covers and lowered her down on the bed. He gently pulled the beautiful wrapping off the woman he prized more than any other. He lay down beside her and pulled her tightly against him. His hands moved possessively along her body. His mouth sought and captured her breasts. Joan moaned with arousal and reached down to touch his firm, throbbing manhood. He rolled her over on her back, eased her legs apart, and moved into the ripe, moist center of her waiting body. Joan arched her back and pulled him deeper into her body. He hugged her close and devoured her mouth. He began moving and driving into her. When he felt himself getting close to climax, he slowed down and began building to greater heights of passion. When he couldn't hold back any longer, his body shuddered as he reached climax and poured his passion into her. She sighed with a primal sound only two people in love can share. He lay down on her body and kissed her and touched her tenderly as his body returned to normal. When he slid out of her body, Joan moaned and kissed him tenderly. Dave rolled off her and lay down beside her. He pulled her close and held her, gently kissing her. No words were spoken for a long time.

Finally Dave kissed her and said, "You are amazing! I've heard the guys saying sex was really great, but I'm so glad you are the first and only woman I have ever made love to. I love you so much, Joan. You are my best friend, my gorgeous lover, and my amazing wife. Making love to you was so much more exciting and satisfying than I ever dreamed it could be. We may never leave this room. I've found everything I ever wanted and needed in you," Dave sighed.

Joan took a deep breath and whispered, "You took my breath away. I never knew love could feel this wonderful. You are my perfect lover, my protector, my joy, and my husband. I've never felt so much love and passion. I am yours from now and always. I will love you forever and give all that I am to you. I long to be by your side and give all of my love to you, and you alone. I adore you and will cherish you always," she moaned. "Dave, how is your shoulder? Did this hurt it?" Joan asked.

"I don't think so. The rest of me feels so wonderful, I don't know if I could feel anything bad right now," he answered. "I'll let you know later. Right now, my wife, I want you again. Please, come and work your magic on me."

The next morning, Joan drove the car back to Birmingham. They decided to drive to Florida instead of fly. Joan was amazed when they passed trees and houses completely covered in a dense layer of vines. Some of the tall trees looked like prehistoric dinosaurs in green. In some places, the vines stretched across the road and they drove through a living tunnel. Dave explained the plant was an extremely fast growing plant called kudzu. It had been brought to the south from China to help stop soil erosion. It took over and now was considered a pest. Joan took it all in with her reporter's eye for detail. Part way through Georgia, Dave took a turn at driving. Joan kept looking around, but was also observing Dave's expression. After an hour, she suggested they trade off again. Dave agreed and smiled, "You saw I was beginning to hurt again, didn't you?"

Joan laughed, "Yes, I did. Now that you can do some exercising, I certainly don't want you to have a relapse. I like this late night activity."

Joan drove through the streets of Orlando. When Dave and Joan pulled up to the Grand Courtyard Suites Hotel, the bell boy took their suitcases and they walked into the lobby, while the valet parked their car. They asked for a room with a large spa. The clerk gave them the key to Room 465. The bellhop took their suitcases and escorted them to their room. This time, there was one key and one bedroom. The spa was not as large as the other one, but Dave looked it over and said it would do.

That night, Dave said, "We have some unfinished business. I felt like my heart would break when I heard you crying in your room after we nearly made love in the spa. I wanted you so much that night. I want to finish what we started that night. I love you, my sweet Joan, and I intend to make love to you the way I wanted to that night."

"Does this mean I don't get to wear my new bathing suit?" she said with a pouty expression.

"Well, you can put it on, but I'm just going to take it off of you if you do put it on. Tonight, there will be nothing between us and the water, and there will be nothing between us, but water," Dave promised.

After dinner, Dave and Joan returned to their room. Joan came out wearing her new blue and green bikini. Dave whistled and said, "I see you are going to play hard to get. I like that bikini on you, but tonight, I'm going to enjoy taking that suit off of you," Dave threatened.

Dave and Joan climbed down into the spa. Dave sank down on one of the low seats. He reached out and pulled Joan down on his lap. Slowly he began kissing her and stroking her body. He reached behind her and untied the string that held her bra on. He pulled it off and draped it over the side of the spa. Then he slid the bikini pants down her legs and hung it beside the bra. He pulled her down on his lap. He moved to another seat and tilted her body so the jets were gently sweeping over her body. When he lowered her down onto his lap, Joan felt the size and strength of his need for her. He turned her and joined their bodies again. Joan felt him enter her body. The warmth of the water whirling around them increased the sensations and brought them to a new height of passion. Afterwards, Dave toweled her body dry. He kissed her all over and explored her, eagerly tasting and caressing her. When she was totally aroused, he took her again and he lifted her to the stars and they floated down together wrapped in each other's arms.

"I know what I want for Christmas," Joan giggled.

"What is that?" he asked.

"How about a spa in our bedroom? That was totally amazing," Joan giggled.

Dave took her in his arms and kissed her, "I like the way you think., but why wait until Christmas?" he chuckled.

## Chapter 28

After a night of sleep and lovemaking, Dave and Joan woke up about 8 am. They ordered breakfast to be served in their room. While they waited for the food, Dave showered and dressed in a pair of light gray slacks and a deep blue shirt. He went into the bathroom and peeked in the shower at Joan. He smiled at her and whistled softly. She turned around and threatened to splash him. Dave laughed and quickly shut the shower door.

"Joan," he called, "when you get dressed today, do you have a pair of light gray or white slacks you could wear with that gorgeous blue sweater you wore when we were walking through Columbiana?" he asked.

"I think I can find something like that to wear. Why do you want me to wear that?" she called out.

"Today is the day I have to go to the Ram's game. You know our team colors. I just thought you, as a team member, would want to dress appropriately for the game. I even brought your team jacket. You might as well go in style. You'll be the prettiest Ram at the game," he laughed.

"I see you're all ready for the game. I'll see what I can find. Maybe we can dress like twins today; won't that be fun?" she kidded him.

Joan stepped out of the shower and Dave grabbed a towel and wrapped her up in it. He kissed her and hugged her close. When there was a knock on the door, he hurried out and opened the door. He took the rolling breakfast tray and pushed it over to the table by the window.

After eating breakfast, they loaded their suitcases in the rental car and headed towards Tampa Bay. The game's start time was one pm, but Dave was supposed to be there by noon to meet with the team. Joan drove down the highway to Tampa. She followed Dave's directions and easily found the football stadium. Dave guided her to the team parking area. He showed his identification to the lot attendant and was directed to a parking place. Dave and Joan got out of the car and began walking towards the team entrance. Since it was still early, there weren't many people hanging around the entrance, and they walked into the tunnel. When they were nearly to the team dressing room, Dave led her into a small side room. Joan looked around and smiled at Dave.

"Joan, I know you are a team member, but I don't want you going into the locker room right now. The guys will be in all stages of undress, and I don't want you learning that much about my teammates," he said with a smile. "Besides, a lot of them are really keyed up; the language gets colorful and not fit for a lady to hear. I hate to leave you here by yourself, but I don't want you seeing all those other guys. You might learn too much about the team. Will you be okay here by yourself?" he asked.

Joan smiled at him and sat down at the table. She pulled out her journal. "Don't worry about me. I have a magazine to read, and I always have my journal. There's no telling what I might want to write about today. We've done a lot this trip already. I doubt if any of it would be suitable for publication in a sports magazine, but someday I might want to write a sensational tell-all story of being married to the handsomest quarterback in the NFL. I think that would be a best seller," she said with a laugh.

Dave kissed her and left to go to the locker room. When he walked in, everyone greeted him happily. They asked him where he'd been hiding, and why he escaped from the hospital. Lyle looked over at him and winked. "I didn't tell them anything," he mouthed.

The team trainer and the coach came over and talked to him about his leaving against medical advice. They checked out his shoulder. It was clean, well-bandaged and showed no signs of infection or problems. They walked back into the locker room.

"We have all been upset when we heard you had left the hospital against medical advice and had disappeared. You owe this team an explanation," the coach said.

"I've been behaving, most of the time, and I have had wonderful care 24/7. I think I've probably healed better my way than in that hospital. I've been checked by the team doctor and I'm feeling good. My shoulder is still sore, but I haven't been taking any pain medicine. I haven't done any practicing, but I have been doing some exercise that the team doctor okayed in moderation. Besides my determination and desire to get well is stronger than ever," he grinned.

"All right, Dave, I know you well enough to know when you've been up to something. Seriously, where have you been? We called your house, but Mrs. Jensen said you weren't able to come to the phone; then a few days later she said that you weren't at home," the coach asked.

"Okay, enough suspense and kidding around. After I got out of the hospital, I left California and married a Ram team member," he said happily. At their look of surprise, he and Lyle howled.

"What is he talking about, Lyle?" the coach asked.

"That's his way of telling you that he just married Joan, our only female team member. According to Cindy, they got married in Alabama on Thursday. Since he couldn't play or practice, he managed to convince Joan to marry him. He's on his honeymoon now. He should get extra credit for taking time away from his bride to stand on the sidelines," Lyle chuckled.

Everyone yelled their approval. Joan heard a loud shout through the wall, but she dismissed it as team spirited cheering. Once the noise settled down, the coach called the team together and began reviewing strategy for the game. By the time the team was ready to go through the tunnel to enter the stadium, they were charged up and ready to go out and win.

Before they left, Dave gave them a pep talk. He said, "I can't play today, but all of you are awesome players. If you pull together and give Ryan, your new quarterback, the same protection that you give me, you can beat any team any day of the week. I'll be standing out there watching and cheering you all on. I would like to ask if it would bother any of you or make you uncomfortable if I had Joan, my beautiful bride, standing with me on the sidelines?"

"She's part of this team! She can be with you on the sidelines. We'll make sure no one bothers her. She's one of us," Henry shouted and the others screamed in agreement.

"I haven't told her about this, yet, but I plan to announce our marriage just before halftime. The news is going to come out sooner or later and, doing it here, she'll have all of you to run interference with the press. I have a couple of surprises for her. She might get mad at me, but I think this will make things easier for us later. Thanks for your support," Dave said.

When the team was walking down the tunnel, Dave stopped at the door where Joan was waiting. He walked in, took her hand in his and led her out to walk with the team to the field. Dave had his team jacket on. He helped Joan put her Ram's jacket on over her blouse. When they reached the end of the tunnel, he put his uninjured arm around her shoulders while they walked out onto the sidelines. In the cluster of players and all the movement, no one noticed her presence. She sat down on the bench and was immediately surrounded by the other players. Many of the players came over and shook her hand.

Henry came over, sat down beside her. He smiled at her, gave her a hug and said, "Congratulations on your marriage, and thanks for what you said to my brother Jesse. He called us on the phone after you left, and he sounded happier than I'd heard him in years. You really made his day! Thanks again."

Joan smiled at every one and cheered loudly for each one. When the game was about ready to start, Dave moved with her to the end of the bench. Joan was awed by the size of the players and by the noise that roared down at them from the stands. At no time was she left sitting alone. When she asked Dave about it, he explained, "Sometimes plays are run along the side lines and occasionally the players get knocked into the bench area. The guys are acting like your blockers to keep you from getting hit by accident."

Dave walked up and down encouraging his teammates and cheering them on. He came back and put his arm around Joan. She had to scream to be heard over the crowd noise. "This is so noisy and so exciting. I can understand better now why you get so keyed up for a game. How are you feeling?" she yelled.

"I'd be feeling better if I was out there playing, but standing here with you is really special, too," he yelled back. He squeezed her and bent down as if to whisper to her, but instead he kissed her.

Right before half time, before the team began walking off the field to the locker room, the announcer said, "Please stay where you are for a moment. We have a very important announcement from the Ram's coaching staff. I'll read exactly what they wrote, "For the first time in Ram football history, two team members are announcing their marriage to each other." There was a gasp from the stands.

The announcer continued, "It isn't what it sounds like. The Rams have one woman on their team. By her quick and heroic actions, she saved the life of their quarterback David Allen a few months ago. To honor her, the players and coaching staff unanimously voted to make her an official team member. Last Tuesday, Dave Allen and Joan Marshall were married in a private ceremony in Alabama. We want to congratulate them and wish them great happiness."

While the announcer was reading the message, the RAM mascot came over carrying a large bouquet of blue and white roses. He gave it to Dave and Dave turned around and gave them to Joan. He pulled her in his arms and kissed her. The stands erupted in cheers and shouts. The Ram team surrounded the couple and they walked quickly into the tunnel. Dave kept his arm protectively around Joan's shoulder. She looked stunned by what had just happened.

"Joan, the news had to come out sooner or later. I know you hate publicity, but I don't think anything bad will happen. If anything bad comes out of this announcement, we will face it together. You are my wife, and I will protect you. Please don't be worried; just please trust me. I love you and I am so proud of you, my beautiful wife," he said.

Joan looked up at him with a shocked look on her face. "I hope you are right, but I know we love each other, and that's all that matters. When your arms are around me, I feel safe and loved. I am not afraid of anything now," she whispered.

## Chapter 29

After the game, the reporters rushed to the Ram's locker room. Dave kept his good arm around Joan. The reporters rushed in and gathered around Dave. He smiled and said, "This is my wife Joan. When I was out eating at a restaurant, she brought me back from the dead. I swallowed a piece of meat and choked on it. She recognized the problem and, thankfully, she rushed into action and used the Heimlich maneuver and admistered CPR until the paramedics arrived, and she revived me. When she began working on me, my heart and breathing had both stopped. According to the doctors, I was clinically dead. It took more than ten minutes for the ambulance to reach me. After 4 minutes without a heartbeat or breathing, brain cells deteriorate and die, and irreversible brain damage occurs. If she had not been there and acted so quickly, I would have been pronounced dead on arrival at the hospital. Thanks to her, I am alive and well today. After meeting her and getting to know her, I realized she is the most beautiful, intelligent, and kind woman I have ever known. We fell in love, and she finally agreed to marry me. We got married in a small town in Alabama last week. While I am out with this shoulder injury, we will be honeymooning, and we hope everyone will respect our privacy." Dave and Joan remained to answer questions for a few minutes afterwards.

That night back at the hotel, Dave and Joan sat together and watched the TV news shows. The highlight of the sport's news was the surprise announcement Dave had made. His statement to the press about Joan's having saved his life was shown on several other channels later that night. The comments had all been positive.

The next day, they left the hotel and began driving over to Dave's parent's house. About 3 pm, Dave took out his cell phone and called his parents' house. When his mom answered, he said, "Hi, Mom. Did you watch the Ram's game yesterday? Oh, you didn't? Yes we won, but I didn't play. I am still on the injured list. What are you doing today? Nothing. That's great. I was wondering if you'd like some house guests. I thought you might like to get acquainted with my wife," he laughed. "Yes, that's what I said. My wife! Where am I? I think we are about an hour away from your house. Would you mind if Joan and I come for a visit? After making our wedding announcement during halftime, we'd like to come and hide out with you. Of course, I'm fine. I'm married to the most wonderful woman in the world, except you, of course," he laughed. "Yes, I am still injured and I had emergency surgery, but I ran away from the hospital so I could find and marry the woman I love. Joan and I got married a few days ago. Since I am out for several games, I decided this was the perfect time to get married. Yes, Mom, I am happier than I knew it was possible to be. Seriously, are you up to having company? If not, there are lots of 'tourist traps' we can go visit," he added with a grin.

When Dave got off the phone, he announced, "Mom is thrilled! When we visited here before, she told me to hang on to you. Now you are officially, legally, and permanently a member of this family. I got to thinking, you've only been in Florida once before, and we never saw any of the sights. I want to be the one to show you the world," Dave said."We might as well start with Florida's tourist attractions and move out from there."

When they arrived, Rich and Caroline rushed out and hugged both of them. Dave and Joan told them all about how they decided to get married in a quiet ceremony. Dave said, "Mom and Dad, I hope you aren't angry about our eloping. I just had to get her to marry me before she could change her mind," Dave laughed.

"I'm sorry we didn't get to see it, but we are so happy you worked things out and are married. Your happiness is the most important thing to us.. We are so happy you came back so we could celebrate with you. Later this evening, we are going to take you out to dinner at the local country club to introduce the newest and prettiest member of our family." Caroline announced. That night, Joan wore the beautiful blue chiffon and satin dress that Cindy had added to her shopping trip. Dave dressed in a suit and tie.

Dave, Joan and his parents celebrated with a small dinner party with some of their friends. Later that evening, Dave and Joan danced slowly together. They walked out on the moonlit terrace to get some fresh air. Dave pulled her close and kissed her happily.

When they got home, it was late, but they sat outside on the porch swing and listened to the sound of the night. Finally, after finishing a nightcap, they went up to their bedroom. Later, snuggled together in bed, Dave sighed and said, "Joan, I don't know what the future holds for me in football, but I know that as long as I have you to hold on to, my life will be perfect. You are all I want or need," he vowed.

"Dave, I love you so much. I didn't know the meaning of that word until I met you. Now I know what it feels like to really love someone and how wonderful it is to be loved by you. I will love you forever," Joan said surrendering to him again. Joan snuggled up and lay in Dave's arms. She sighed and drifted off to sleep feeling totally fulfilled as a woman, who felt loved, cherished, and protected for the first time in her life. She sighed and snuggled closer to Dave and thanked God for his blessing on her life.

## About the Author

Mary has enjoyed writing all of her life, but has just begun sharing her stories. She has worn many different hats in her lifetime. She worked as a church secretary and proofreader in a small weekly newspaper in California while in high school and college. She taught for seven years before stopping to adopt her son. While her son was growing up, she managed a camera store for three years and then worked ten years in a municipal court system in California as a courtroom clerk. Next, she returned to teaching at a boarding school on the Navajo Indian Reservation in Kayenta, Arizona, teaching there for two years. She finished her teaching career teaching working in special education classes for fifteen years in Globe, Arizona. After retiring in 2005, she moved to Oracle, Arizona, to be closer to her family--her son, daughter-in-law, and her three wonderful grandchildren.

She is active in her church and enjoys playing canasta, hand and foot, reading, writing, and volunteering at the local pregnancy care center.

##

## A Note from the Author

Within the next few months, I am hoping to publish more of my stories for your enjoyment. I hope you enjoyed reading this book as much as I liked writing it. Check back and see if I have any new books you might like to read.

