-Uh-oh. Looks like someone's
sign's a little crooked.
Ugh. It looks awful.
Need a thumb tack?
-Sure.
-Not so fast.
Schrutes are farmers by hobby
and traders by trade.
Through the art of the swap,
I will walk out of this garage
sale with the finest item here
I will trade you
for the used candle.
-Forget you.
-Come on. It's trash,
like your sign,
unless you have this.
-Fine.
Just give it.
-That's how it's done.
-Are you serious?
A half-used candle?
Get out of here, Dwight.
You're blocking my table
with your giant body.
-Oh, 'cause there's
a huge line of people
who want your spinster
tchotchkes.
-Screw you, man.
People like my stuff.
-People like Ryan?
Let me tell you
about men like him.
He comes over,
and you're like,
"Hey, baby,
let me light a candle."
And you pull out this one,
half used.
He's like, "[Gasps]
Who else is she seeing?
I better
lock her down fast."
-You can take
my Helen Fielding collection
-And the Jennifer Weiner
collection.
What is this?
-How did those get out?
I'm sorry.
-"Professor Copperfield's
Miracle Legumes"?
-I was in Jamaica,
and I got lost,
and it was getting dark
this one night,
and then out of nowhere,
this guy comes with a cart
and he's selling these.
Dwight, he told me things
about myself
that there's no way
he could have known.
-Mm, that's a common
swindler's trick.
-Probably. Probably.
So I buy some, I turn the
corner, I feel like an idiot
so I go back to get my money
and he was gone.
-So, you want to sell me
magic beans?
[ Laughs ]
-Correction.
I do not want to sell you
"Professor Copperfield's
Miracle Legumes."
-Nice try. No, correction --
terrible try.
[ Chuckles ]
-Nice.
-Not bad, right?
-I can't really tell, but --
-Nice.
-I know, right?
What the...?
-Oh, my God.
-That -- That's impossible
-It is, right?
I mean, it's impossible.
[ Sighs ]
-All right. I'll take them
-They're probably worthless.
-Probably.
-Leave the telescope.
-I started with a thumb tack and
traded my way to a telescope
But in a way the most valuable
thing here
wasn't the telescope at all.
No.
It was this packet of beans.
So, I traded the telescope
for it,
and I can just go buy
another telescope.
