Hey all right, so
for some reason
I don't know why this works
this way but anyway,
I'm Adrienne Everheart, I am your
dating and relationship coach
I am a feminine energy coach.
And I help women get in touch
with their feminine energy
and I'm going to help you
survive your breakup,
get him back if
that's what you want.
But most of all, I'm going to
show you how to really make
him hate that he
ever, ever left you.
Now this is one of my favorite
things to speak about because
one of the things I love to do is
empower women with feminine energy.
And feminine energy is
such an incredibly strong
powerful thing that
all women have
even men have you know,
feminine energy,
but it's something that women have
that we can use to really help
calm the mental energy we
have of masculine energy.
So, just a really quick recap
while I move my chair over here,
is masculine energy is action,
doing, making things happen,
having an agenda in mind,
and by thinking I mean
not that it's not
feminine to think.
You can totally think as
a feminine energy woman,
but feminine energy is
about being in your body.
It's about being in your body
and finding your feelings.
It's not about
figuring out the man,
it's not about having an agenda
and some sort of strategy.
Now, the fun thing
about this is that
when you really get back
into your feminine energy
and you're coming from this
really strong powerful place
he can feel it.
The man can feel it
and I teach something
called the Hail Mary Pass
and my ABCs to get
him back program,
which is a lengthy
program that teaches you
everything I know
about how to get your
man back. Whether you're
separated and it's
heading for divorce
or you're just you know, you're
broken up as boyfriend girlfriend
whatever it may be.
I teach you everything I
know about feminine energy
and how you can re-attract
this man and in that process,
get this.
About nine times out of ten,
you don't even need to
do the Hail Marry Pass.
The man feels your energy
and he comes back around.
It's really an amazing,
amazing thing.
So, I can't wait to teach
some of that too all tonight.
My kitten is behind me and she's
having so much fun making
a ruckus I hope she doesn't make
too much noise during this video.
So, let's get started
this is about how to
survive a breakup
with feminine energy
and what to do if you're broken up,
if you want to get this man back
or not it's up to you.
And we're going to
be talking about
how to do this with
feminine energy.
So you feel your absolute best
and the idea ladies is
that you feel so good
and you feel so amazing
and you have such a glow to you
that when he sees you,
he's like ooh, my
God, what did I do?
What did I do wrong? When he...
How did I mess up?
When he sees you.
He regrets it, I’ve done it.
I teach my clients how to do
it and you can do it too.
I'm going to teach you how
in this video all right.
So, the thing I
want to talk about is
the kind of stages we go
through with a breakup.
And as I talk about them,
I'm going to speak
about how feminine energy can
come into play with those.
So, the first one is
why, why, why.
When you go through a breakup,
you ask yourself about
a hundred times over
why did it happen,
what did I say,
what did I do, was
he doing this,
was he doing that? But
you ask a lot of why.
And what that does is
where does it get you
right up here into
figuring him out, solving
making you know, what
could I have done?
Going back in time,
revisiting the situation and it makes
you get all up in your head and
you most likely develop
some type of neuroses.
It feels totally uncomfortable.
You stay up all night
thinking about this,
you talk to all your girlfriends
they give you all kinds of advice.
I hear about it and I
know I used to do it.
So, what ends up
happening is that
you lose yourself even
further down the rabbit hole
of masculine energy.
Now, don't get me wrong
masculine energy has
got a lot of great
places in your life.
But in solving and
fixing your breakup
and having a wonderful
relationship with a man,
masculine energy is
not your friend.
Boundaries is your friend.
Knowing what you're feeling
in your body is your friend.
So, let's stay on track here
why, why, why, blame yourself,
criticize all this stuff.
One of the best things you can
do is just tell your brain,
say thank you,
thank you, I hear you,
you're trying to figure this out
thank you I appreciate you
and then drop down
into how you feel.
Well, I feel like I'm spinning in
circles with all this thinking.
And just love that part of you,
go I love you and thank you.
Find what you feel in your body
good or bad, all right,
find what you feel.
So, this is going to
start getting you out of
this thing that we
do to ourselves
because remember we're on
a masculine mindset world
and many of us we're brought
up in with the concept
that we go out and get it.
We make it happen ourselves
and in a relationship
with a man,
feminine energy is going to
balance his masculine energy
authentically and naturally.
People say to me
you shouldn't teach us
to not be who we are.
I'm teaching you to be yourself,
I'm teaching you to tap into
this other side of yourself
where another part
of you is dominating
and let me tell you
boys will dominate.
Boy energy will love to dominate.
So please give me thumbs up if
you're hearing this message
and this is beginning
to resonate with you.
The next thing we will try
to do in a breakup situation
even if it's husband wife and you're
separating is that you'll reach out.
You'll reach out, you'll ping their
phone, you'll text their phone,
you will email them,
you will message them
you will try to
communicate with them
to either work on it and fix it
and talk about the relationship.
And for all the women out there
who write to me and say
my husband and I have
separated recently
and I tell them all
the same thing.
I said when you get
together with him
don't talk about fixing
the relationship.
Just go have a good time,
just go, let him
take you out to eat.
Have the kids over and everybody
play and just be in the moment.
Don't say well, we need to
talk about all these issues
over the past 15 years
that went wrong.
Don't do it, stay in the moment.
Be present, I remember one time
my guy Jeff and I when we
were getting back together
and we're kind of
in that process,
we'd gone to the park
had an amazing time,
but there was this thing
eating at my head
that I just wanted
to work on with him.
Just work on a little bit
and he finally got
so mad and he said
why can't we just walk in
the park and have fun?
And that's how men feel. So,
this is how you reconnect.
You reconnect by not
working on the problem.
The problem is going to work itself out
it's going to dissolve and go away.
Trust that a big part of working
through a breakup is trusting.
Trusting that this is all
going to unfold perfectly.
Because let me tell you it will,
but when you try to control it and you
try to manipulate a specific outcome
then you get into this
dangerous territory
because you're tempering
with, controlling things
and that's where you begin to
see that you're much better
off if you just lean back.
Know your boundaries, know
what you will or won't do.
Okay, know how you
feel in your body,
but I'm not controlling it, I'm
not manipulating an outcome.
So, don't reach out.
I'm not saying ignore him,
but don't try to fix it by
reaching out and solving it
and understanding all the things
that unfolded and went wrong.
Someone just said what
is you were ghosted?
Ghost belong in a cemetery
not in your heart.
So, if a man has ghosted you
just let him disappear
into the ether
and do not give him
another thought,
that's my best
advice about ghost.
So, the next thing we're
going to have here is anger.
You are going to be super-duper
angry at some point
because this man has
potentially walked out on you,
left you with a ton of bills
to pay, owe you money,
not taking care of the kids,
all sorts of stuff like this.
And we're going to get mad maybe
there's another woman, maybe
you got mad at him
and then he left
and you're going to just
get so much anger
and you're going to want
to really just rectify,
you're going to want to engage.
This is when you do
stuff like drunk-dial,
even if you're not Adrienne,
you might dial him up
and just want to
argue and engage
and you're not going to get anywhere
with all that anger with him.
That is he's not going to
go, you know you're right.
You cussed at me
just the right way,
I'm coming back to
you and I love you.
It's not going to happen you
know it's not going to happen.
So before you, you know,
kamikaze this thing
give yourself a little time.
This is what I do in the
ABCs to get him back
is I give you about three
months of this unfolding
to see what happens.
I give you very specific tools to do and
we're going over some of those tonight.
So, instead of having
a lot of anger
I want you to focus
on what you love.
Focus on what is going
right in your life
what do you appreciate,
what are you so, so, so,
so grateful for?
Because any of it can
be gone just like that.
We all know it,
everything we have gone.
Poof, people we love
gone just like this.
So, when you are wanting
to get angry at this man
and take it out on
that situation,
take stock of what is working for
you in your life be grateful.
It's going to help you get into this
luscious, luscious feminine energy.
So all these little
tweaks we're making,
is like all these little screws
we're turning inside of you.
They begin to put the new
you together you see,
but you've got to you know,
do them all and start small.
This one is my favorite
because I always get this.
I get emails from people who say
you know I was in love
with someone we broke up,
but he, I've determined he
is a narcissist with borderline
personality disorder
and probably bipolar
and I'm like wow!
Okay, so you've been able
to psychoanalyze him
and then figure out everything
that's wrong in his brain,
but you still want him back.
So, this is what we do,
we figure out what is
wrong with the person
and we analyze them and
Google some stuff online and we
come to the determination that
they are, have some sort
of psychiatric problem
or I get this one, he has a
lot going on in his life.
My husband his parents
died back to back
and then he lost his job
right after his mum died,
so that was the reason we
kind of be together BS
The biggest bunch of
BS you'll ever have
is making excuses for a man
about why he can't be with you.
Is just not true,
he's not with you because he
doesn't want to be with you
and he's got to
figure some stuff out,
I'm going to talk about that.
Some of the things
that he needs to do
is he needs to be
able to provide.
He needs to be able to provide
something if it's not income
it's going to be something else,
but he's got to be a provider
that's what he is going to
feel in his masculine energy.
He's got to be able to maintain
so it's not like he came
and picked up your kids
and took you all out
to chuck-e-cheese
and it was a great weekend and
then you went to Myrtle Beach
the next weekend and
then he ghosted you.
That's not maintaining,
he couldn't maintain, he
couldn't keep that going.
And I'm not saying the man has
to give you the world and
take all your children
out every time
that you guys date or
anything like that.
But they have to be
able to maintain.
The last thing is that
they can't compete.
Now this happens on a lot
of different levels.
If your career is skyrocketing
and he's floundering
in his career.
He might feel like that
is kind of competition.
If you're challenging on
him on a lot of stuff,
you're picking him apart,
he's your little project,
he's going to feel challenged.
And a man when he meets a
woman in her masculine energy
he'll fight you a little while,
but eventually he'll
just walk away.
Most men will just walk away
because they don't
want to fight a woman.
They don't want to
challenge that woman.
They don't want to compete with a
woman who is in her masculine energy.
There's nothing worse, right.
So, how do we get away
from analyzing a man
and over analyzing him?
So, here is the thing,
unless you have a
degree in psych... you know, you
have Masters in psychology.
Sorry psychiatry and you
can you can do this,
it's not your place to
put a label on anything.
It's not going to
really help you.
I want you to instead find
what you feel in your body.
Now, I talk about the artist.
The artist was the
man who was between
my first husband and
my husband now.
He popped up in my
life, love bombed me,
came on strong, I love you I
can't live without you, he was
eating up all my time
and then came over one day and said
I don't want to be in a
relationship, I'm done that's it.
And I had sacrificed so much
and been guilted so
much to be with this guy.
And by then I had
gotten rid of all
you know, my ex-husband,
he helped me move
my husband's stuff
out of the house.
I think my husband and I
might have got back together
had this guy not been
pushing me so much.
I say that now,
but here is, here is
what I'm getting at
is that you can look back on
something and you can see
behaviors and characteristics
that might mean they had
narcissist qualities.
But at the end of the
day how do you feel?
How do you feel
the way that person
was treating you?
So, this particular man in
my life he was hot and cold.
He would disappear for
two weeks at a time.
He would get mad over a
particular word I used.
It wasn't the right word
to use with something,
it was just cuckoo stuff,
but my inner girl was so
wounded and she was so clean
because the good times
were so high up.
That's what I was addicted to,
going back to that amazing
love bomb feeling.
When in reality I had a guy
that was criticizing me,
weird, acting different in front of
other people, you get what I'm saying.
So, how do you feel that's how you
reverse this with feminine energy.
What are you feeling?
I had someone write me today,
she told me all this terrible
things this man had done to her
and I said let me ask you a
question the way he is right now,
the way he's showing up
right now in your life,
is this your dream relationship?
Is this what you used
to as a little girl
dream about marrying,
is this it?
And if that doesn't work,
is this a man that
your grandma would be
proud of that you're marrying?
If your grandma knew
all the proper details,
would she say yes
honey, go for it?
That's usually a good litmus
test to what grandma would say
Now, the next one is fix it fast
because you are in
your masculine energy
you may want to just
fix it fast like
hey let's work this
out come over,
have him come over, seduce
him, have great sex
we're back together.
Doesn't work that way, it
doesn't work that way.
Let me make this
perfectly clear,
when you go through a breakup
and you have either broken up with
a man or he's broken up with you,
there is no instantly
getting back together
if it is, it's going to turn
into a pumpkin at midnight.
You got to start dating again.
If this man wants to see you again,
you start dating again slowly
and treat the relationship as if
this is the first date again.
Let it unfold slowly over time.
There is no instant fixing a relationship
and boom we're back together.
Even for husband and
wives who are at home
together you're living together.
Someone wrote me and said what
about if I'm living with him
we're broken up and he's
being disrespectful?
He doesn't owe you
anything anymore.
The only thing that you can
do in that situation is say
I feel you know, you have the right
to talk to me however you want to
yet when this happens
I feel this small
and I feel like
crying my eyes out.
That's a good way to express
what you're feeling,
but you're not doing it
to get that man to change
because he doesn't owe
you anything anymore
so kind of have that attitude.
You know not too
many generations ago
the women in your
family to survive
meant you had to be nice to men.
Niceness was about
survival with men.
And that's not really
the case anymore is it?
Maybe it's not the
case for you I hope
It's not the case for your mum
I hope and maybe your grandma,
but everybody before that
going way back in time
women's daughter's survival
was being nice to men.
So, times have changed you
don't have to be nice
and he doesn't have to be nice,
but you can use him
for good practice
and you can use him
for learning how to
shape these skills and
have your boundaries.
He speaks to you in a bad way,
you have a boundary and you go
to another room and say ooh,
I'm feeling totally anxious,
I'm feeling totally sad now.
Go to your room shut the door
don't slum it, shut it nicely.
So again we're talking
about you know,
this is common sense stuff you're
going to get more flies with honey
or more bees with
honey than vinegar.
If you want that man back
remember you may not.
Okay, so moving on
this is my short and quick
list of all the ways
that he's going to really
hate that he ever left you,
and I've done this
with my clients
and I have, I did them myself
and I loved it how it felt
every step of the way.
So, when a man breaks up with
you, even if it's your husband
one of the best things you can
do is start dating other men.
Now, wait a minute before
you turn off the channel.
By dating other men,
quantum dating,
if you're in a relationship
and you're like
you know what, I've got a
wedding band on my hand.
I don't really think I'm going
to get on match.com right now
you know or whatever
and there are legal
ramifications to that
in most states anyway if
you're still married.
But hang in there,
quantum dating can
begin immediately
by changing your vibe
and switching that
invisible switch.
You've got a switch on inside of you
that says I'm married I'm invisible.
I'm in a relationship,
I'm invisible.
Switch that back on and
begin to notice men,
let men notice you.
Here's my favorite one to do, I
do it with guys all the time.
A man is standing there and he's
kind of looking around I go hello.
That easy hi, and the
guy is like ooh, hi,
beautiful girl talking
to me ooh, my God.
Try it, there's nothing wrong with hi,
old men, young men, doesn't matter.
It's all you have to do.
Have this energy in a
warm receiving place.
So, I want you to
treat your chest area
as if it is a window with
shutters that opens like this
and there is your heart okay.
Open the window to
reveal your heart
and before you go somewhere I
want you to open that part of you
and just have your heart beating
there for everyone to see.
I also teach you how to
breathe down into your body
into your hips,
breath into your hips and relax
those muscles and widen them.
And it doesn't hurt to give your butt
and your body like just some wiggles
all over just wiggles and shakes,
loosen up that energy.
Now see how you feel, take
a couple of breaths there.
That's how you quantum date.
Now if you have been
dumped by a guy,
I want you to start writing
your new dating profile.
Start writing it, just writing
it is going to help you.
It's going to help
your energy a lot.
Get a girlfriend, somebody
with a good camera
go to the park take tons
of new photos of you.
Bring some clothes in
your car to change into.
Get your hair done at the
blowout bar or whatever.
Go somewhere get a ton
of photos taken of you.
Have fresh new photos
and have these for
your dating profile,
but also you know for your
life put them out there
he's going to go whoa! She
is dressed to the nines and
she's at that park you know,
back there in with the trees
looking all sexy and beautiful.
And again, we're not doing this so he
sees these things and has this reaction,
but there is a really
good chance he will.
Ultimately, it shifts your
energy from the inside.
When we shift that
energy on the inside,
you're saying hello to new men,
men are speaking to you,
men are talking to you,
you're getting noticed.
This is perfectly
okay flirting to do
and you just have this energy
that you're open, okay.
So, start doing that,
start writing your profile,
get new photos made, we're
changing up your vibe,
you're talking to men,
I've taught you the femme
opening exercises.
Now, here is one of
my favorite ones,
before Marie Kondo was a big
hit on Netflix I read her book
and it, I guess
it happened about
three or four years
before her show.
And I started implementing
some of the things
that she had taught me
as well as some feng shui
and other things
that I had learn
and one of the best things you
can do is clean out the old.
Clean out the old and even if
it's just one drawer per day
or a portion of
your closet per day
your kids rooms, your
kids dresser drawers.
A cabinet in the kitchen,
a drawer in the
kitchen, your purse,
dump your purse
out clean it out.
It's going to change
up your energy
and you're going to begin to
create space for the man.
I'm laughing because it
also makes you feel good
and that's one of the coolest
things about feminine energy.
Is like someone just
wrote pixie doll.
It feels good to declutter.
So sometimes when we're tidying,
we're in the act of tidying
we're preparing for the next day,
we're preparing for the next thing
and that's where I want
your energy to be.
That I'm preparing for
this next thing in my life.
Now, for those of you who want
the man to come back you
wouldn't be in your house
having empty drawer
cleared out for him,
have a space in your closed
cleared out for him,
have him with a bedside table
and an empty drawer a little
basket to put his things.
You're creating a space
for that man to fill,
ladies trust me on these one.
Someone wrote me recently
she goes well, Adrienne
if I wear a wedding band and
pretend I'm married because it
makes you feel good you know,
if I set a place for
him at the table
and have a pretend
dinner with him.
Would I, would I be
filling that space up
in the universe, would
I be filling it up
with this imaginary
man I've created?
And I told her that the space
in the universe is infinite.
There's so much space out there
you cannot possibly fill it up
with wonderful thoughts that make
you feel good about creating
life with a new partner.
And yes, wear the pretend
wedding band see how you feel.
I did it I felt a
little nuts at first,
but then I started to own it
and really, really
feel good, okay.
Okay, I'm reading some
excellent comments
thank you everyone I'm glad
this is resonating with you.
Now, the next one is
femme-inspiring projects,
for me I wanted to
take method acting,
I had studied method
acting in college.
It's one of the most difficult
things I've ever done in my life
and I went and took like a Master's
program for method acting.
I started taking a painting
class for oil painting.
I want you to find where the
universe is calling you.
Where the universe is calling you,
where you feel like you might
be getting judged if you
were to do these things.
What is it that's really
whispering to you
and go do it, go start small.
Don't pack up your house and
you know, move to another
country or something.
Start small
you know, bring something
new into your life.
It might be a class that you
wanted to take at Hawaii.
It might just be buying
some water colors
and some paper and experimenting
with water colors.
YouTube is such an
amazing channel
you can learn how to do anything on
YouTube and anything on the internet
and if you don't have
YouTube and the internet,
you got the library, most places
in America have libraries.
You can learn how to do anything
and it's just a matter of
getting some time to do it.
If you're busy with children
and you're working a full
time job on top of that
see if you can switch a
day with a girlfriend
and you guys can switch off so
you can have a day to yourself.
See if you can manage your time a
little differently in the evening
and have a healthy boundary
with your children
and these flat devices that
we're all looking at right now
put them down,
put them down and turn them off
and get back into your life
because this is the real
life happening here.
Not in here, not in
the flat device.
Get into your real life, okay.
Get off my soapbox
about that one,
but that one is going
to change your energy,
you're going to get back into
your life and feel so good
and feel grounded.
feel grounded
okay.
The next one says
Ooh, this is one of my
favorite things I did.
I went and got a tan,
I got a spray tan,
I got new highlights in my hair,
I bought new nail
polish that I had never
you know, bought before. I bought
like some yellow and pinks and neon.
Just stuff I didn't
normally wear
and I went and got a few
different pieces of clothing
to just make my
wardrobe different.
I remember I bought like
this bright yellow jacket
I had bought a pair of
neat kind of like neon
blue tennis shoes
and I had gotten some
different jewelery. And
I got this really
bright colorful stuff,
I don't wear any of it anymore
but in that moment and time,
it really helped me transition
back into my feminine energy
because I was just mixing it up
and that's what I want you
to do, mix it up a little bit.
Try a new lip-gloss try a new
little highlight in your hair.
We're going to mix it up.
Ooh, someone said they're restarting
their tap dancing classes, exactly.
This's exactly what I mean.
Dancing is a great way to
get over a man you got it.
So change up how you are on the
outside clean up your closet.
Now, here's the big one that
a lot of people don't think to do
but change up the way you
drive home from work,
change up how you
brush your teeth,
you brush your teeth with
this hand, do it with this hand.
Try changing as many
things as you can
in your life
and see what that does
to your energy and your vibe. Because
one of the reasons husbands
especially we get this right
with husbands boyfriends
is that our energy
is like on them,
it's on them
and it's not on us anymore
and we get in a rut
and we get in a routine,
we get real predictable.
Every time he comes
home, you're like hey baibe
how was your day? Here's dinner.
It's the same routine
over and over again.
Have him come home
and you'd be upstairs
taking a bubble bath.
Have him come home from work
and maybe you're not even there,
you decide to go to a yoga
class at seven o'clock
and leave him a little
note with heart and kiss.
So you see them saying
change the way you drive
home from work.
If you always start at this
end of the grocery store,
start with that end
of the grocery store.
Change up as many
things as you can
to get that freedom going
for yourself again.
Masculine mindset is very rigid
it's very linear.
This is not linear
and that's why a lot of times
it doesn't make sense at first
because it's not logical
it's following what
you feel in your body
okay.
And it's fun
that's the biggest part when you
start doing it, it's really fun.
The next one, your voice,
I want you to practice changing
your voice a little bit.
I don't want you to change
who you are for a man.
I'm not saying that.
I'm just saying experiment
with your voice.
A lot of times when we have
been into our masculine energy
for so long
our voice actually
has become different
than really how our inner
girl would like to speak.
And I want you to just
experiment with it
and just have fun with it
and just see what comes up.
You can look on YouTube
for some training on voice
training and things like that
and you can see if you
can begin to speak
in shorter sentences.
Try to get to the heart of what
you're saying a little faster.
There's all sorts of fun things you can
do with the language and your voice.
I've written a book called
500 Ways to Talk to a Man
and it's all about
finding what you feel
and speaking it in
very short sentences
because that's what men get.
Men get the short sentences.
I'm talking to you
women now,
I've been talking nonstop
for half an hour.
I feel like it's
been five minutes
because this is what we do.
We can like go like this
forever at least I can.
So, just a quick recap
we're going to talk about you how
you're going to make him hate
he ever left you.
I want you to commit
yourself to change.
Whatever you did in
the past didn't work
and that's why you're here now
and that includes
blaming yourself.
Blaming yourself and
beating yourself up.
When you reject parts of you
and you don't like certain parts
of you, a man can't either,
he can't love all of you
if you're rejecting
parts of you as
well, okay girls.
So, someone said
can you give me short,
examples of short
sentences for a man.
Yeah, ooh, I feel so happy,
uh I feel so excited, uh,
I feel tingly all over.
Super short sentences
so, let's keep going
with the questions
and I'll take a few more.
Someone said she's been crying
for over an hour now.
Grief is part of this
don't rush it.
It's a normal part of it all
and you have to
just let it unfold.
Give yourself time to grieve.
Set aside time for
grieving, all right.
Melissa M. said and
you will feel better
believe me you're
going to get there.
Melissa M. said how
did you manage a
full juicy filling life and
you're having health challenges?
It's hard to have that
with limitations I journal
and practice gratitude.
You have to believe
that you are going to get better
and know it and see
it in your body,
and experience that feeling.
It isn't easy
and there were a lot of times
there were a lot of dark
days believe me.
Especially when it comes
to health problems,
the best thing you can do is
create a mental
energy of yourself
and see yourself doing
a particular activity.
Whether it's running on the
beach, riding a bike,
walking your dog and just
get inside that person
that other version of you,
how does she walk,
how does she talk, what is
she doing with her life
and practice that visualization.
Debbie Bernstein have some
great visualizations for that
I think it's kind of future self
a future self-visualization.
I broke up with my boyfriend
this is from Undraska.
I broke up with my boyfriend
because he was not
caring and he was
narcissistic, okay.
Even though I broke up
with him, he wants me back
how can I start over with him
and what to say to him
when he says he misses me.
Well, that's easy
do you miss him?
If you miss him say
ooh, I feel the same.
It feels so good to
connect I miss us.
I miss connecting
and you got to start dating
again from scratch.
Someone says, let's
see, Sarah says
thoughts on conflicting advice says
love happens when you stop trying
on one hand and on the other, you
must get out there and date
a lot, it's a numbers game.
So, first of all,
I don't say love happens
when you stop trying.
Love is a lot of work.
Mr. Rogers has a great
I guess he wrote a
lot about love.
How about how it's a
verb, it's a noun,
it's something you have to
practice and things like this.
I think what that means love
happens when you stop trying
is when you are
going on dates
and going I think
this is the one.
I think I've met the one.
I want you to just
kind of be like,
you know I'm going on a
date I'm going to practice,
I'm going to see how I feel,
I'm going to just show up.
But yeah, you got
to go on dates.
Do you have any phrase
that would help turn
you man on in a subtle way?
Why do you need any
help turning a man on?
Just show up,
just show up,
that's all you have
to do you're a woman
get in front of him, show up
he's going to be turned on.
Someone says sometimes
I energy, I don't
that's not a question
so, I can't answer it.
Someone says, I'm I wrong to
not immediately respond to his
morning video chat?
No you're not wrong,
but
you're playing a game
if you're purposefully
you know holding back on him.
You know, that's not cool either
and a man can sense it when
you're playing games with him.
He can really sense it.
Someone said how do you
get over drunk dialing?
Apologize once
and then let it go
and turn your phone off
after nine o'clock.
I once heard that
any email or phone call that you
need to make after nine o'clock
is like not a good
idea, don't do it.
Let's see here,
someone saying how
do you go back?
I don't understand
that question.
you need to go a
little bit more.
Here is a good question.
How do I stop seeking
approval from men
and avoid being friend zone?
So, first thing, stop thinking
of yourself that way.
Stop thinking of
yourself as I'm someone
who is seeking approval and
I'm getting friend zoned.
See yourself as a
beautiful powerful
dynamite feminine energy woman
that has just men coming to
her from all over the place.
Just everywhere you go men,
men, men coming to you.
Sit with that for a little while,
okay.
If you're empathetic you can fill
other people's emotions, yes you can,
but you need to
know what you feel.
Even if you're empath,
know what you feel
and not that other person.
That's about them.
One of my most popular
post on my website was
don't let his problems
become your problems.
A lot of women are empaths.
A lot of women
we have antenna that I
believe we have developed
throughout the ages
because remember
not too long ago our survival
was based on being nice to men.
We had to be nice to men
so, we developed these little antennas.
I want you to know how you feel,
okay.
I'm going to take one
more question.
Someone said Lauren says,
how do I confront hot and cold
behavior without appearing negative
and always questioning.
Lauren are you in a committed
relationship with this person
or are you just dating?
No.
You're not in a
committed relationship
I'm going to take that, okay.
So, you're just dating,
so, here's the thing
nobody owes anybody
anything in dating.
If he's hot and cold he's
showing you what he's made of
whilst he's dating you.
He's showing you
he's hot and cold.
You say
he's showing you
he's hot and cold
and is that what you
really want in your life?
So, I would say to him wow!
It feels so amazing to date
you well we do get together.
Yet it's been like
three weeks
since I've seen you or heard from you
and it's always amazing to
be with you, I love so much
yet I'm looking for a
regular dating relationship
so I'm going to be moving on.
And he'll go
what the heck I'm here now and
go okay, It feels amazing.
And he's going to hit you up
you know, text you
and see if you can
stay in this little
game with him.
And that's where you
need to have a boundary.
Same goes for any of you
that are going through a breakup
and the guy maybe breaks up with
you but then he keeps texting you.
He keeps staying
in touch with you.
You need to have a
boundary like, you know,
it feels amazing
to hear from you
and my heart skips a beat
when I see your message pop up,
but I'm looking for a loving
long lasting relationship
that leads to marriage
and I feel like a text buddy.
That is one of my
all-time favorite
scripts in 500 Ways
to Talk to a Man.
So, if you want to go deeper
into how do I get a man back?
I have a program.
Every day women on I
Heart Love Academy
write to me and say
I have got my guy back
we are dating again.
We're back together I have
finally turned this around.
I never even had to
use my Hail Mary.
I'm not bragging about this,
but I worked very
hard on this program.
I did a lot of trial and error
and it's worth checking out.
It's at my website
everheartcoaching.com.
Feel free to join my
free group on Facebook,
it's at I Heart Love Academy
and I'm so glad you
all tuned in tonight
and thank you so much
for being here.
You guys are all super amazing.
Thank you so much for sticking
around and staying up late with me.
Last question someone said
how do I get a man back
into his masculine energy?
You have to go into
your feminine energy
a hundred and ten percent
and stay there
until he gets activated
into his masculine energy
all right, stay there.
Don't do it for him,
don't make it happen,
don't force the agenda,
stay in your feminine energy.
There have been
nights I have waited
until 8:45 for my husband to finally
figure out what was for dinner.
Because I want him doing it, you
see, you got to wait them out.
You got to wait
them out all right.
But I, but I, but I
ate some food anyway.
I made sure I got fed all right,
but you see what I'm saying,
you sometimes have to wait
men out so they turn
the ship around.
Think of a big ship,
it's got to turn around
and it takes a little while.
Okay everybody, you all
have been awesome.
Thank you so much for
joining me tonight
and come visit me over
at I Heart Love Academy.
I'd love to see you there, bye.
