 
## (3 Book Romance Bundle)

## The Cowboy's Love

## Sex With The Billionaire

## Loving The White Billionaire
Copyright 2016

Smashwords Edition License Notes

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

# Table of Contents

The Cowboy's Love

Sex With The Billionaire

Loving The White Billionaire
The Cowboy's Love

by

Julie Allen
Copyright © 2015 by Julie Allen

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

The Cowboy's Love

All rights reserved.

This book is protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America. No part of this work may be used, reproduced, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording and faxing, or by any information storage and retrieval system by anyone but the purchaser for their own personal use.

This book may not be reproduced in any form without the express written permission of Julie Allen, except in the case of a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages for the sake of a review written for inclusions in a magazine, newspaper, or journal—and these cases require written approval from Julie Allen prior to publication. Any reproduction or other unauthorized use of the material or artwork herein is prohibited without the express written permission of the author.

# Chapter One

"Didn't someone tell me there was going to be a party here tonight?" I jumped up at the sound of my best friend Rachel's voice, causing sand to go flying up around my boots. My dress flapped in the wind as I fought against it to jump into Rachel's arms. She was as tall as a model, and she always had a big smile on her face. The other two people I invited weren't far behind her, waving at me as they approached carrying beer and marshmallows; the perfect combination.

"So where's your other half?" I asked Rachel, looking around to see if her new husband was joining us. She was actually visiting the area for a honeymoon slash meet their parents trip. She had gotten married to a man whom her parents hadn't even met. Apparently, he was some executive from New York that had just fallen in love with her when they'd met during Spring Break in Hawaii.

"Oh, he's already setting up our loft in Manhattan. I leave in a few days, so he thought it was best to just let me do my thing while he did his. But that's why he is the perfect guy for me," she explained with a laugh before walking over to the pile of wood I had set in the sand. She used a lighter to spark it, creating a small fire for marshmallows.

Before I could say anything else, I was lifted off the ground and squealed before finally being put down on the sand again to see that it was Miles that had picked me up. He had come into my life in high school. We were in choir together and both sang soprano. He was a very attractive blonde with great fashion sense, but he was that flirty ladies' man that was okay to be friends with but you never dated.

"I've missed you," I told him as he looked me up and down.

"I guess that freshman fifteen didn't get to you," he complimented, making me blush. He gave me a kiss on the forehead before walking over to set down the marshmallows. It was Lauren who was struggling to carry all the beer, which made sense since she was always _That_ girl.

"It got to me, but I promise it's all alcohol weight!" Lauren called out, patting her belly. She was the shortest of all of us. Despite what she seemed like, she was extremely intelligent. In fact, she was on her way to a Master's degree in Marine Biology. So, she was only home for about a month before she would be back in the grind. But I tried not to let it get to me that I knew it might be one of the last times for a while we would hang out. It wasn't like it hadn't felt the same before we all went off to college in the first place. I just wanted to enjoy my birthday and forget the fact that compared to all of them, my life was relatively boring.

I kneeled in my dress next to the fire as we settled in, trying to picture us all the way we were before. We used to come to the beach nearly every weekend in high school doing things we were so sure were wild and reckless, but they were really just harmless fun. None of us had physically aged too much, but there was something about each one of us now that just didn't quite seem the same as we did as teenagers. But I hoped for one night we could create who we were and have a great time just the way I liked it; if not for my birthday then to say goodbye to Rachel.

Miles popped open the bag of marshmallows and began to throw a few at each one of us so that we could roast them. "So, what are you going to do in New York, Rachel?" Lauren asked, narrowing her eyes at the leggy brunette.

"Well, I haven't really figured out that part yet. I mean, he makes enough money that I don't have to work, but I don't want to do nothing. I thought about maybe starting my own photography business or something. I don't know, I'll probably just play it by ear." Rachel shrugged, leaving Lauren's mouth hanging open.

"No way, that body would be a waste behind a camera. You should be in front of it. You can't tell me that the guy has no fashion connections. I'd love to see you as like A Victoria's Secret model or something Lauren suggested.

We all laughed. "That's only because you'd live vicariously through her," I said, popping my almost black marshmallow in my mouth before nudging my best friend with my knee. "But I really couldn't see you as a housewife. You should do something. Maybe you can be one of those snooty women that have those charity parties where people wear ball gowns and fight over who donated more." I laughed at my own comment and heard myself snort much to my embarrassment. Rachel nudged me back as the whole circle began to cackle at the terrible sound my sinuses had just made.

I put my hands up in surrender and stood up, knowing the perfect distraction. "So, doesn't anyone want to jump in that water and get this party started?" I stood up and started to pull my dress over my head, teasing them with little patches of my bare skin. I knew what they were thinking because I had done it before one night when we were drunk. I think it was at Miles' 17th birthday party. We had all ended up going skinny dipping at my suggestion.

Finally, I pulled it all the way off to reveal that I had on a cute blue tankini with most of the back cut out. That was when they all stopped ogling and began stripping off their own clothes. Miles stripped off his shirt and ran at me, scooping me up so that my legs were on one side of him and my head and torso were over his shoulder. I screamed as he ran us into the water, letting the wave's crash up onto me. Then, he finally threw me down in chest deep water. I gave him a good splash in the face.

"So, what about you, birthday girl? What are you going to do with your life now that you're getting older?" Lauren asked. She had always been the inquisitive one. Usually, it was a fun part of her personality, but I was unsure whether or not I had the answers. Compared to the other two women before me, it seemed like my life was some undecided tragedy. But it was really as simple as the fact that I hadn't enjoyed city life at all. I had gone to school to get my BA in Business because it was the most useable degree, and it was going to help me hopefully run my father's ranch one day. So, I went with honesty.

"I feel so not put together by saying this, but I really don't know what's next. I came back a year ago because this is where I want to live. I love it here, and I love the ranch. I always thought that I would take over the ranch one day when my father gets too old to run it, you know? I've been helping him since I was just a little girl. But beyond that I have no real plan other than to not go back to college. I'm done with all of that. It's just too loud for me."

Rachel laughed at that, so I splashed her perfect face. She needed it anyway; she was hardly wet. She was so much taller that the water barely covered her still. "You would never make it in New York if you thought college was too loud. This is Texas, and I know they say everything's bigger here, but really New York has a larger population in a much smaller space. There's always noise."

"Well, that's why I am not planning on living in New York. I'll settle for visiting you and your husband once in a while," I said, shooting a look at Rachel. "Besides, I'm not the only one sticking around, right? It's not like Miles has any specific plans." I leaned against him, putting my arm up on his shoulder. But the awkward silence that passed between us told me that I might have been mistaken. "Wait, don't tell me you're leaving too." It came out a little whiny. My friends were all growing up and moving on without me. What happened to fun and sticking together?

"Now, don't give me that look like I've betrayed you or something. You know I've always wanted to get out of here, Star. And now I am. I can't wait to get married or get a career or something like that. So, I'm just going to go and find something for myself somewhere else. I leave for Dallas tomorrow morning." Suddenly my birthday had turned into this big pit of depression that passed through all of us. At least Dallas was still in Texas; New York seemed like the other side of the universe to me at that moment.

I sighed and let it go. There was no reason to be angry with him. If anything, I was secretly disappointed with myself. I had been the fun, interesting country girl in high school. But I'd grown up to be the boring country girl who didn't want to leave home. It was unnerving. It was like I had lost my spark. I wasn't ready to let that happen.

I ran to shore, grabbing two beers and instantly guzzling them down. It was time to stop the serious talk and get the party underway. Lauren cheered and whooped, following me onto shore, grabbing another beer of her own before running to her old blue pickup. Soon, she had their favorite country station blasting a Luke Bryan song. Lauren came running at me and grabbed me, swinging me around. I felt instantly dizzy since I had the beers a little too quickly, but Miles showed up behind me and caught me. Pretty soon we were all dancing and grinding on each other like old times, the wet ends of my long blonde curls slapping against my body.

We lost track of time as we danced to song after song and drank more and more beer. It started to feel like old times; I almost forgot I had just turned 24.

Eventually we all collapsed into the sand together, our heads touching and began to look up at the stars to the sound of the waves crashing. I had seen pictures of beaches all around the world my whole life; see through clear blue ones and ones with black sand, but I couldn't imagine they help anything to my favorite piece of the Texas coast. There were sounds and sights and nature that just seemed not to be found anywhere else. Or maybe it was that all my memories were right there on that beach.

At some point I must have conked out because I woke up drooling on my passenger side window as Miles drove my blue pickup the two hours back home to Guerra. "What happened?" I asked him, feeling tired. "What time is it?"

"You're alright. You had a bit much to drink, so I decided to drive you home instead of riding with Lauren. She sobered up pretty quick. But of course we all know how well she holds her liquor. Oh, and it's 2:30 in the morning, just so you know. Your parents will be thrilled."

I tried to laugh, but it came out sounding fake. He was right, though. It brought back so many memories of when Rachel and I used to stumble in giggling after midnight senior year. "How far are we?" I asked, trying to sit myself up straight so I could get my bearings. He didn't have to answer, though. I knew exactly where we were. In fact, I could make out the edge of my parents' property in the distance.

"Well, that answers that," I commented, trying to finger brush my still damp hair so I didn't look like a complete crazy person. Of course, I could only hope that it wouldn't matter and I'd make it in without waking them up. But I never had before.

Miles pulled up next to the front gate leading into the ranch, and I looked around dreamily. Even in the dark I could see how beautiful the place was. It reminded me why I moved back in the first place. Open space with green grass and room to move and be free with the scent of rain and heat forever in my nostrils was as close to paradise as I believed I could get. There were even animals all around I could relate to and enjoy being with.

Miles helped me out of the truck and walked me up to the ranch style home that I'd lived in my whole life. It still had the same white brick and a cactus out front. It was my mother's idea since she used to live in Phoenix before she married my father. That was her way of compromising. If she had to live on his ranch, then she had to bring the décor with her.

Miles took my key and unlocked the door, leading me inside the dark house. Luckily, my parents had at least left the stove light on. It cast a dim yellow glow towards the hallway that led to my bedroom and bathroom. The benefit of building the house from the ground up instead of just buying one meant that everyone got their own bathroom and even privacy. I basically had my own side of the house.

But sure enough, just as we reached the hallway, lights flicked on, and my parents came out in their pajamas and slippers in classic old people fashion. Sometimes I thought they would make great comic strip characters because of how hilariously but amazingly typical they were.

"Hi Mr. and Mrs. Milligan, I'm just making sure your daughter makes it to bed safely. The truck is parked outside. She didn't drive home," Miles explained quickly. He had that down pat still.

"Well it looks like it's just like old times," my mother said shaking her head and placing her hands on her hips before cracking a smile. "Good night, Star."

"Good night, Mom," I said with a smile as Miles helped me the rest of the way to the bedroom. Before I knew it, I was sound asleep.

# Chapter Two

I dusted my jeans off and adjusted my hat, trying to shield my eyes from the sun. I didn't have many hangover symptoms, but that Texas summer sun was getting to me for sure as I helped my father on the ranch. I had made it a habit to work with him at least three days a week to prove to him that I could do it. I knew I was a tiny girl, and I hadn't always seemed that serious, but I had a work ethic. I especially had one when it came to do what I loved which was feeding animals and working the land. I could repair fences and help a cow give birth as good if not better than any other guy that worked on a ranch.

"You've been doing a good job lately," my father praised, nodding over to me as he wiped the beads of sweat pooling above his wrinkled brow. Up close in the sun it was easy to tell that my father was aging. He was still a very handsome man with salt and pepper hair, and he was in great shape. But his face looked like it had seen many years. He had sun spots too, running up and down his neck. Would I look like that in 20 years?

"Thank you, that means the world to me. I don't want you to think I'm just trying to be a burden for you guys. I really love it here," I told him, picking up my jug of water and letting some run down the back of my neck.

"What made you think we felt that way, Star?" he asked, furrowing his brow in confusion.

"It's just everyone else is getting married and getting careers and their own places, and here I am coming in at three in the morning and still living with you guys rent free. It's not because I don't want to do anything."

"Oh, Star, I didn't think it was. We love having you here, and I wouldn't call all this sweating rent free. But I do worry that you might want to do something else but you feel obligated to stay here and take on the family business. I mean maybe you might like to move to a bigger city and find a husband or a new career. You should be exploring at this age." Star shook her head, wondering what she was doing that made it unclear what she wanted.

"I know I could have all those things, and at some point I'm sure I'll want a family and to see other places. But I love small town living, and I like working with my hands and being with the animals. I don't feel jipped. I feel whole." I looked around me finding it hard to imagine another way of life in a place where people didn't work with their hands and didn't have ranches; where they had bosses and sat in front of computers all day.

"I can understand that, but I am bit surprised. I didn't realize you were so passionate about this. We can talk more about it if we go riding. Would you like to?"

I nodded. He knew how much I enjoyed riding horses. I'd started very young, insisting on it even though I kept falling off. I quickly became a natural and even trained a couple of them for competitions.

We went into the stables and picked out our horses. I chose a white one with black spots. She was young and loved to run. My father picked his trusty old red horse. He was regal and muscular and had been in the family for the last seven years.

We trotted out of the stables as I tried to control my horse's urge to run. "So, what is it you're wanting to do or accomplish?" he asked, looking at me seriously. It was nice to be able to connect like that with my father. I knew so many people who didn't have any kind of relationship with their father. Not that he and I had always been close. I spent my teenage years disagreeing with him and getting closer to my mother, but it was just a phase. My father was my hero now that I knew all the hard work he put in every day to make sure that our family could live the way we did. He was the hardest worker I knew.

"Well, I'd like to work on a ranch, possibly run one someday. To be honest, I was hoping eventually I could take over this one or be your partner or something when you guys get older and can't do as much. I am just not sure what to do while I'm waiting. I really love it here, Dad, and I don't want to leave. But I do want to be my own person and pay the bills and all of that, you know?"

My father chuckled and patted me on the back. "I can understand that completely. You know I was the middle child in my family, but my younger sister of course didn't want anything to do with the ranch. Then, my brother who I assumed would get it flunked out of college and fell out with my father. I was only 16 when I saw that opening and went for it. I got my GED and started to work on this place immediately. It's what I always wanted. And you are clearly my daughter. And I think what you want is reasonable. There are plenty of ranches to get experience on around here including mine. You should think about that and look into it. Then, we can go from there."

I nodded, feeling suddenly really good about myself. I really didn't know for sure if they wanted me to work on the ranch or take over one day, but it seemed like my father was going to take me seriously. "Thanks, Dad," I said as we rounded a corner. It seemed we had only been out there a couple minutes, but as we headed back towards the stables, I realized it had been much longer.

"There was actually something I wanted to ask you about," my father said as we got closer to the stables and climbed off of the horses.

"Okay, what is it, Dad?" I asked, feeling a little curious.

"Your mother and I have our wedding anniversary coming up in a few days, and I'd really like to do something special for her. I can't remember the last time we took a trip together, so I wanted to take her to Galveston for a little bit and maybe see that pier they put up and just relax together, you know? But I'll need someone who can take care of the ranch while we're gone. I was hoping that maybe you'd be alright with doing that." He looked up at me almost guiltily, like he thought it would be a burden to ask such a thing. But my parents had been married for 30 years almost, and they deserved some time away. And I was happy to give it to them.

"Dad, I don't know why you seem to feel so guilty about asking. Even if I didn't want to work on the ranch I would do this for you guys. I think it's great that you want to take Mom out for your anniversary. You deserve a break; you both do. Plus, it sets a good example for me one day just in case I ever decide I want to be with somebody. You guys are still so love with each other. Don't lose that. It's why you two are the perfect parents." I reached over and wrapped my arms around my father's neck, standing on my tip toes. He was a rather tall man. I got my blonde hair from him but my small stature from my mother.

As I pulled away, I thought I heard him sniffle like he had been holding back tears. "Thank you so much, Star. Your mother is going to be so excited. Plus, this can be a good trial run to see how you do. I'll go tell your mother so she can start packing. I'd love to take her tomorrow night if I can. Is that alright with you," he added the last part like an afterthought. He was so excited; it seemed he couldn't hold it in.

"You go tell Mom, and you guys take as long as you need. I'll make sure our horses get up." I laughed as he practically ran towards the house. It was nice to see a couple that was still so happy about spending time together after so many years. I hoped one day if I met someone we could have that same success.

***

"Thank you so much for this again, dear," my mother said as she gave me a hug and a kiss. It was around six fifteen, and we had just had a nice dinner so they wouldn't have to stop for food on the way to Galveston. They had booked a hotel right on the beach and were planning on having a nice night there together before starting any activities in the morning. Apparently the hotel had a Jacuzzi and everything. I was sure they were going to have an amazing time.

"It's nothing, Mom. You've done so much for me, the least I can do for you is let the two of you go on a trip for your anniversary. It's the big three-O." I could see my mother was about to get emotional as she turned around and tried to hall her own luggage out the door. But after my father gave me a tight hug, he picked it up along with his own so she didn't have to carry it.

"Such a gentleman," my mother told him quietly, kissing him on the cheek. I waved to them as they closed the front door behind them. As I heard their truck start and drive off, I suddenly felt very alone. The house was quiet.

I sat down in front of the television and just stared at it, flipping through channels as I realized there was nothing to watch. There would be no work on the land until morning either, so I literally had nothing to do. I picked up my cell phone and dialed Rachel's number instead, knowing that she was leaving soon. Maybe she would want to come over and have a final sleepover or something.

"Hey, what's up?" Rachel asked when she answered the phone. I could tell I was on speaker for some reason.

"Not a whole lot; I'm just a little bored and lonely over here. My parents let me watch the ranch while they go to Galveston for their 30th anniversary, and it's so quiet here. There's nothing to do until morning. When do you leave?" I asked her, trying to hint at the fact I wanted her to come over.

"My flight goes out tomorrow evening at eight. I'm actually trying to pack my things now and having a really hard time. Guys seem to be so much better at this stuff than we are." I imagined her trying to fit all her hair products on top of her clothes and sitting on a piece of luggage to get the thing to close. "Maybe I can come over in the morning, though. I'd love to say goodbye. I'm really going to miss you." Well, that answered that question.

"Yeah, I would like that. I'm going to miss you too. I'm going to miss all of you. I can't believe we're all going to be apart again. Just promise you'll keep in touch." I was feeling a little sorry for myself in that moment when really I shouldn't have. There were worse things than your high school friends moving away.

"Of course I will. In fact, I'll probably be back to visit for at least holidays. And you know that I can fly you up to New York to see me. I mean, I'll be pretty bored myself until I find something to do. We'll talk all the time. But hey, I've got to get to packing or he's going to kill me for not being ready for that flight. He's dying to have me there with him now."

"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow," I told her before hanging up just as a knock came at the door. I wasn't sure who it could possibly be since my parents were gone. Maybe it was Miles or Lauren. I went to the door and opened it without looking out first. Guerra wasn't really the place where people showed up at the door to harm someone. But I did get a surprise when I saw who was there. It was the local sheriff. He was an older gentleman and had been sheriff most of my life. But like my dad he was still a very fit man.

"Good evening Ms. Milligan," he greeted me, tipping his hat.

"Good evening, Sheriff Tate. What brings you by this evening?" I asked curiously. It wasn't every day that the sheriff just knocked on your door even in a small town like Guerra.

"I'm afraid there's been an accident, Star. Your parents have been in a car crash." I froze and stared at him like he was crazy. I'd just seen them like an hour before. They had just left with smiles on their faces. What was he talking about? Plus, my father was an excellent driver. He had never been in an accident.

As my mind began to process it, the first question came to mind. "Are they alright?" I asked, beginning to feel panic rising in my chest.

"I'm afraid I don't have all the details. I have a report from witnesses that it was getting hard to see because it was dusk and started to rain near Hebbronville and there was a curve in the road that the other car missed. So, they hit your parents pretty hard. They were flown to the hospital in Laredo where they could be better cared for. I have come to escort you if you like. The fastest way is to take 16 which is where the wreck happened, so you have to have a police escort to get through."

"Sure, let me get my things," I said quietly as he nodded. I turned down the hallway to my room and leaned against the wall for a minute and just counted my breathing for a few seconds. I didn't know what was ahead of me, but I had to keep it together. Mom and Dad were going to need me.

I went into my room and slipped on a pair of jeans and a better shirt. I also grabbed a bag and threw in something clean just in case I was at the hospital a while. Then, I walked out the door, following the sheriff to his vehicle. My body moved by itself. I had no train of thought. It was like my mind was in a complete fog as the sheriff took off from the ranch.

# Chapter Three

I was out of it for the next hour or so as we made our way along the same path that my parents took on their way to celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary which was actually not for another couple of days. Were they even going to be able to celebrate now? I didn't know how severe their injuries were, so I couldn't even speculate.

But I suddenly sat at attention as the vehicle came to a halt in front of a road block and flashing lights. We weren't quite to the wreck yet, but they had put blocks several hundred feet back so that they can send cars to the exit off the highway because it was closed. Sheriff Tate rolled down his window as a man approached wearing a uniform as well. "This is their daughter," the sheriff explained, pointing over to me. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to smile and wave, so I just sat there and stared out the window, preparing myself to see what had become of my father's old truck.

The man in uniform went over to some of the other people out there and started moving some of the barrier so that we could get through. There was a wrecker on the scene already that was blocking my view as we drove slowly forward. "I apologize that you have to see this. It takes a while to clean things up. But I assure you, there is no one left at the scene. All parties have been taken to the hospital." The way he said that made me wonder if something bad had happened to the other driver.

As we approached, the first thing I saw were the tire marks. It looked like someone swerved while trying to hit the brakes. I assumed that was my father. Then, as we passed, I looked to my right and saw something terrifying. It was a large truck of some kind, like one belonging to a business, that had hit my father's truck. Not only had my father's truck flipped, it had been slammed straight into the guardrail. It resembled a twisted piece of blue metal on the driver's side as compared to the passenger's side. That side was dented in where the other truck seemed to have hit it a second time right at the front passenger side headlight.

I felt instantly sick to my stomach and was glad as we passed the end of the blocked off section of the highway and began to speed up. We would soon be passing South Fork Estates before switching highway to head northwest to Laredo. It was going to be a long ride still, and I had no idea what had become of my parents. I just kept seeing that smashed up hunk of blue metal and imagining what injuries could have been sustained and how anyone would come out of that without at least being paralyzed. I loved my parents, but I was not ready to care for them like children yet, nor was I ready to say goodbye. But I couldn't think that way. I just had to stay focused and make it to the hospital before I came to any conclusions.

When we finally pulled into the hospital, I looked around and had a hard time imagining sick people inside. It could have easily been some kind of luxury hotel. There was a huge, gated pond out front with a fountain, and the exterior reminded me of a Spanish adobe. It was ridiculously beautiful.

Sheriff Tate walked inside with me to make sure that I was going to get the information I needed. It was after eight at night so the front desk wasn't manned. We had to actually walk back to the desk in the emergency department where the nurses were sitting. They seemed to all be chatting as if there weren't patients around them with fatal injuries. It was a very busy hospital, so I assumed there had to be patients around. We walked up to a woman in blue scrubs who smiled up at us. "Hello, there, who are ya'll looking for?" she asked sweetly. Sheriff smiled back and took his hat off out of courtesy as he leaned into the counter.

"I am the sheriff in Guerra, and this woman's parents were flown in here after a car wreck outside of town. I just want to make sure she speaks to somebody and gets the information she needs about them. I wasn't given much myself. Their last name is Milligan." He cleared his throat as the woman began typing on her computer.

"Alright, I'm just going to look up their location to see if they are up in Trauma or in surgery. They could even be here in the Emergency department. Then, I can better direct her to where she needs to go." The smile was still on her face as she scrolled with her mouse, but I swore I saw a slight twitch before she looked back up at us.

"Doctor Wayland is overseeing their cases, so I'll page him and see if he can come and talk to you about the condition of your parents. Until then, you can wait in the family room up in Trauma on the third floor. You'll see a small door next to the elevators that's labeled when you get to the third floor. Just go on in and make yourself feel at home. There's a bathroom in there as well as some tea and coffee." I nodded and turned to the sheriff.

"I have it from here, but thank you for bringing me all this way." It came out really formal, like I was doing business with someone. I supposed you never knew how you would handle that sort of situation until you were in it. Sheriff Tate shook my hand and put his hat back on his head before walking out of the room. I took a deep breath and followed the signs leading to the elevators and rode one up to the third floor. It was really fast, almost nauseatingly so, but it was very quiet. You could tell a lot about a place by how well the elevators ran. It gave some comfort about the treatment of my parents.

I found the room that the woman had mentioned and walked in to find that there was a man in a coat who I assumed was Dr. Wayland already sitting there and waiting on me. That was awfully fast, which I thought was strange and possibly a bad sign. Shouldn't he be busy taking care of my parents?

He stood up as I entered the room and held out his hand for me to shake. "I am Dr. Wayland; I'm assuming you are Ms. Milligan?" he asked, shaking my hand a little less firm than I expected from a doctor. He was tall and lanky, towering over me awkwardly. He even seemed to hang his shoulders to try and get closer to my level. "Why don't we take a seat so we can talk about your parents?" He gestured to some typical waiting room seats. Though, I couldn't help but notice the room was more the size of a large office and had less than ten chairs in it.

I followed his instruction anyway and sat down. "Feel free to get a cup of coffee or some tea first. I find that some of that orange tea over there calms my nerves," the doctor continued. I wondered for a moment if he was trying to avoid something like bad news. But I went over to the table that had a fresh pot of coffee and some hot water ready for tea. I chose some lemongrass tea and some honey chamomile both in a large Styrofoam cup. Then, I sat down once again, ready to get the show on the road.

"Alright, can you please tell me about my parents now, doctor?" I asked as my whole body threatened to shake apart from the anxiety that was building. Dr. Wayland sighed and wiped at his brow and ran his fingers through his dark hair. All the antics had stopped.

"This isn't any easier for me than it is for you. It is sometimes the worst part of my job. From what we can tell, your father passed on impact. He was pinned against the guardrail by the vehicle after it hit your parents' car for the second time. There was nothing that could be done for him. I'm sorry." He reached out to touch my hand gently in comfort, but it felt more strange and invasive than anything else. Was he saying what I think he was saying?

"So, he's gone, then?" There was that strange emotionless voice coming from my mouth again. It was odd because on the inside I felt like I was exploding at the seams, but on the outside I could do nothing but go through the logical motions.

"Yes, I'm afraid so. Of course, you'll have to go down and officially identify the body. It's just something that's unfortunately necessary," the doctor responded. "I'll have a nurse escort you down when you're ready." He nodded like it was the most natural thing. I shifted so that his hand fell off of mine. He cleared his throat and ran his fingers through his hair once again.

"Wait, so if I have to identify his body, where is my mother?" It had just occurred to me he said nothing of her. Maybe she was still alive, though I couldn't imagine giving her the news that she had lost her husband just before their 30th anniversary.

"Your mother's condition is much more complicated. She had some internal injuries we had to deal with right away, and she needed blood transfusions. After we took care of her immediate needs, we ordered some tests, mainly a CT scan for her brain. She was unconscious when they brought her in. It looks to me like she has some significant brain damage. She needs some help breathing, and we aren't sure if she's going to wake up or if she will be functional. What we do next is up to you. We could certainly keep her hooked up to see if her condition changes. We could give it a time limit and then unplug the machines and see if she can breathe on her own. Or you can review the test results yourself and decide if you think it's best we just let her go. We assume you're familiar with her wishes when it comes to things like this, but she didn't have a DNR."

I sat there, completely stunned. My father was dead. There was no way to sugar coat that. And my mother was in a coma with brain damage and may or may not have been a vegetable at that point. The worst part was they wanted me to make a decision as to whether or not she lived or died. I couldn't even bring myself to say anything. How would anyone handle something like that? I had no idea what my mother would have wanted. We didn't talk about stuff like that. I was only 24.

As my mind was warring with itself, Doctor Wayland decided to make my decision for me. "Why don't you go ahead and take care of your father and then I can take you in to see your mother. We'll go over all the test results and possibilities then. That will give you some time to process this and think about it. Let me go get a nurse who can take you down." He patted my hand again and left the room. It was strange that he thought a little time was all I needed. It was going to take a lot longer to process the fact that I was possibly about to lose both my parents in one night.

A nurse came into the room and motioned for me to follow her. We took the elevator down to the basement floor which I assumed was where my father was being kept. She must have realized the kind of mood I might be in because she didn't say much of anything unless she had to. I really appreciated that. My thoughts were all over the place, and I had no idea how to talk to a human at the moment.

"This is as far as I go," she said in front of the silver door that led into the morgue. I already felt a chill standing in front of it. "Doctor Stone is in there waiting for you." She nodded to me and headed back upstairs, leaving me alone in that cold hallway. I took a deep breath and went inside, not sure what to expect.

"Hello?" I said to the doctor whose back was to me, shivering where I stood. He turned around and smiled at me awkwardly. He was a young man not too much older than myself with red hair and glasses. I wasn't sure what I was expecting, but that wasn't it. "I'm the daughter of Ron Milligan," I said timidly, and he just nodded. I guess he didn't know how to talk to me either. He rolled out a covered body and handed me a clipboard with a sheet to sign. I read over it and saw that it was just for me to confirm the identity of the body or that I didn't recognize it.

As he pulled back the sheet I found myself hoping that it was a mistake. It was going to be some stranger under there, and I would find out that my parents were just fine on their way to Galveston still. But even through the many injuries, I knew it was him. The doctor covered him back up as I nodded and signed the clipboard, handing it back to him.

I ran, taking the elevator back up to that family room with the tea. I went straight to the bathroom and emptied anything that was still in my stomach into the porcelain bowl in front of me. The worst part was knowing that it was only the beginning. Before I knew it I would be saying goodbye to my mother too because as soon as I saw my father it all became too real. I knew I was going through what no one ever wanted to go through.

# Chapter Four

I suddenly felt like the walls were closing in on me as I looked over everything that Doctor Wayland had given me. While I was down in the morgue they had done even more tests on my mother. The doctor was honest with me about the fact he had little hope that my mother would improve. If by some miracle she ever came out of that coma she wasn't going to thrive. She would need help doing every little thing. She may not have even been able to communicate. I wanted it to be some ridiculous lie. I wanted a second opinion, but I knew that I was at one of the best trauma centers in the state. They knew what they were talking about.

I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what would happen if my mother did wake up and come home with me. I would have to tell her that her husband was gone and that I had kept her here to live a sad life. Even though I had no idea what her wishes were, I couldn't imagine her being very happy about that. No matter how much she loved me, she would have wanted to be with my father wherever he was. And he wasn't there anymore. I instantly knew I had my decision, and it was almost a sense of relief. In a way, I had already lost her.

I stood up and went to find the doctor. I wasn't going to wait any longer. Who knew if she could feel pain or not? Besides, it didn't make sense for me to be there anymore. I had so much ahead of me to do, and I needed to do it in my own home. But then I realized that I didn't even have a ride home, and I wasn't in the mood to ride back with the sheriff. So, before I talked to the doctor I needed to make a call.

Rachel's phone rang a few times before she answered. I hoped I wouldn't be too much of a burden to her at the moment, but she was the only one I could imagine coming to get me at the moment. "Hey, two calls in one day. You must really be lonely," Rachel joked. If only she knew the half of it.

"I need to ask a favor of you, Rachel," I said. _Good_ , I thought my voice sounds like me. I'm at the trauma center in Laredo, and I'll be leaving soon. But I was brought here by the sheriff. Is there any way you could come and get me?"

There was a silence, but I knew she was still there because I could hear her breathing. "Is everything okay?" she finally asked.

"It's my parents. They were in an accident," I breathed out, not able to say more than that.

"Alright, I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Don't take 16," I warned her before she hung up.

"Can I help you?" one of the nurses at the desk asked me after I hung up my phone. I had kind of just been standing there, and she seemed annoyed by it.

"Yes, I need to speak to Doctor Wayland. I have made my decision," I told her. She nodded and went to fetch him. She didn't even bother paging him. When the doctor came back he had all sorts of papers for me to sign consenting to what we were about to do and to use her as an organ donor if they could. It was almost an hour before I finally got in to see my mother. Rachel had already texted me to tell me she was getting pretty close. At least I wasn't going to have to hang out after saying goodbye to my mother.

The nurse led me into the room where my mother was. She was hooked up to a bunch of machines. I stood next to her and grabbed her hand. "I'll give you a few minutes, but they'll be in here soon to unplug her," the nurse said. She wasn't trying to be rude, but it did come out cold. Maybe that was the way she used to get through each day with this stuff happening around her all the time, so I couldn't really be angry.

I looked down at the woman who gave birth to me and knew I was going to fall apart the minute I left that room. "Mom?" I asked quietly. I didn't know if she could hear me, but I really hoped she could. "I'm going to let you go be with Dad now because I love you, and I know that's what you deserve. I'm going to miss you every day. You have been the best mother to me; better than most people could even hope for. I want you to know that I'll be okay, and tell Dad that I love him, and I'll take care of the ranch.... if you left it to me. And if not I'll make sure whoever gets it will take care of it." I began to cry, and I wasn't sure what else I could say to her. That pretty much summed it up. So, I just held her hand until the nurse came in with the doctor to unplug everything.

I left the room and stood outside the door until I heard the heart rate machine signal that she was gone. That's when I knew it was time for me to go. So, I headed out in the parking lot to find Rachel sitting there in her car. I climbed in, no longer hiding my emotions.

***

"We have everything set for Thursday evening at six o'clock Ms. Milligan. If anyone wants to send flowers just have them sent here to our address under the same of one of your parents. Do you want there to be a viewing the day before?" I gave the woman at the desk a strange look at the word "viewing". Logically, I knew the point of those. I had been to one for one of my grandparents when I was little, but especially in their situation it seemed like an inappropriate question. I was just about to say something when my phone started to ring.

Rachel patted me on the shoulder. "I'll take care of this, hun. You go answer that call, okay?" I felt so guilty that she had stayed behind with me instead of being with her husband, but I didn't know how to handle all that alone. I had to plan the funeral, clean out the house, call all the family...It seemed like the list just never ended. Where was the time to grieve?

"Hello," I answered the phone. I sounded very disinterested, which I probably was.

"Yes, may I speak to Ms. Star Milligan?" a man with a British accent asked.

"This is her," I said, knowing I sounded exasperated. I hadn't looked in the mirror in two days, but I was sure I had circles around my eyes. I probably looked like a zombie or something.

"I am your parents' lawyer. I have in my possession their will and am the executor. Is there a time soon that I can meet with you?" the man asked. I hadn't even thought of that, but of course they had a will. They owned a lot of property.

"You can come see me at the ranch in about an hour if that's alright," I responded unenthusiastically as Rachel came up to me.

"I will see you then, Star," he said before hanging up. I looked to Rachel and she nodded to let me know she took care of the whole viewing thing. She placed her hand behind my back and gave me a push out the door, which I needed. I was on autopilot and breaking down.

"Sometimes these people can be so insensitive. They just get so used to dealing with this stuff that I guess they don't realize it's a big deal anymore. That's pretty sad, huh? But don't you worry about a thing. I already made it clear that a viewing was not an appropriate thing and for her not to ask about it. You're just having a memorial pretty much, right?" Rachel asked as we drove down the road back towards the ranch. I nodded. They were getting buried in their family plots but with closed caskets. It just didn't feel right to do it any other way after their injuries.

Just the thought of going back to the ranch was daunting. On the one hand I did want to be home, but it was hard to think of it as home when I was in the middle of making big decisions about my parents' things because they were no longer there. I didn't even know if I had the lawful right to go through their things yet, but I just needed to stay busy. Plus, I thought some of the family would want some trinkets or something when they came for the funeral, and I didn't want to deal with shipping anything. They all lived pretty far away. "So what was the phone call about?" Rachel pressed on. She had been trying to get me to talk for a while. It wasn't that I was holding my emotions back; I just really didn't know what to say. Grieving literally left me speechless.

"It was my parents' lawyer. He's supposed to be meeting me back at the ranch in a little while to go over the will with me." I shrugged and looked out the window, watching the familiar Texas landscape pass us.

"Wow, that's kind of a big deal. They probably just gave you everything since you're their only child, but what if they didn't? What do you think you'll do?" It had actually already occurred to me that there was a chance they wouldn't have given me the ranch or the house or anything. They hadn't even known I wanted it. There was a chance they gave it to a distant cousin or simply willed the land to the county to sell or do what they wanted with it. As hard as it was to be in that house without them, it was even harder to imagine living anywhere else. "Well, you know you're always welcome to stay with me. I'm sure the same goes for Miles. And he isn't that far. I mean, at least he's in Texas still."

I appreciated her sentiment, but I tried to imagine myself couch surfing with a bunch of guys or living and working in busy New York. Of course, being near Rachel would be fun, but it wasn't going to be a permanent solution. I just had to hope that my parents provided for me.

It wasn't too long after we got back to the ranch that the lawyer showed up. His name was Edward Redmann. He had on a grey suit and nerdy red glasses. He definitely wasn't originally from Texas. I could hardly imagine my parents sitting down with the man to go over important matters like their property, but as he showed me all the paperwork, it became clear that's exactly what they did. Everything belonged to me; their entire estate. They had left everything to me. Suddenly, I felt like I couldn't handle any more information. I excused myself to the bathroom and just sat on the cold tile floor with my head in my hands.

Of course I wanted the ranch, and it was somewhat of a relief to know that they trusted me that much. But no way did I ever expect or want the property that way. I thought I'd just inherit it when my parents got too old to care for the land not at 24 when they both died in a car crash. I just couldn't go through with anything else at the moment. I felt frozen, and I hoped yet again that Rachel would come to my rescue and usher the man out of there. But I also knew that wasn't fair. She should have been in New York already with her husband.

If only I could have stayed curled in a ball in the bathroom and pretended the word didn't exist, I would have. But I had to take care of my parents' estate and get back to some kind of a normal life. The ranch, the animals, they needed me.

I stood up and wiped the tears away, looking at myself in the mirror. " _Okay Star,_ " I told myself. _You're going to survive, and you're going to get through all these things you have to do one by one. You are not going to break down somewhere embarrassing. You're going to make sure you get through all of this with as much dignity as you can, and then you're going to let Rachel go to her husband_.

I took a deep breath and headed back out to the man and began going through all the paperwork. I needed to just get it done so I could move on to the next step. I'd heard somewhere that sometimes you had to take life one thing at a time, and that's what I was going to have to do.

"Rachel," I said, turning to my friend once the lawyer finally left. It was dark outside, and she had cooked some fried chicken for us to eat along with corn and potatoes. It was the first real meal I'd had since I took that fateful trip to Laredo. "I think you should go to New York after the memorial... like right after."

She stopped eating and looked up at me like I was crazy. "I can't just leave you to deal with all of this, Star. He can wait. I've known him for a tiny fraction of the time I've known you." She reached across the table and put her hand on mine. For a moment, I really wanted to give in and just let her stay, but it wasn't right.

"I need to deal with this on my own at some point. I love that you are here, and I need you to get me through the next couple of days. But then I need you to go where you belong and let me learn to live again. You need to see that awesome husband of yours and live that fun New York life. You don't need to watch me mope around here." Her shoulders sagged, but she let the subject go. I got the feeling I was going to have to buy that ticket for her and drag her to the airport when it came time.

# Chapter Five

I pulled my hair up with a silver clip and adjusted my dark green dress. Something about buying a black dress just to wear to a funeral just didn't seem like it made sense. Besides, I'd heard that it wasn't even a thing to wear black anymore as long as no one was in like bright yellow or red or something. So, I stuck to a wrap dress that I had from high school graduation. The fact that it still fit proved to me just how little I had changed since then. It was just another sign of how stuck I was compared to my friends, and the fact that I was now actually alone didn't help me. I had even told Rachel I was helping her pack her bags and driving her to the airport after the funeral. I must have been some kind of masochist.

I took a deep breath and walked out into the chapel where the memorial was being held. The caskets were waiting outside at the burial site. The memorial was just going to give people a chance to say a few words about my parents whose pictures were up by the podium.

I saw many sympathetic eyes turn on me as I made my way to my seat at the front where immediate family was supposed to sit. Since I was pretty much it, I had asked my father's siblings to sit with me as well as my mother's younger sister. While the chapel was decently full with people most were either long time family friends or cousins. My father was the only one of his siblings to have a child. My mother's sister had her three children with her, though, ranging from 11 to 19. It was good not to be alone, but it felt strange considering I hadn't seen any of them in several years.

The memorial started, and to be honest, it was hard for me to pay attention while people went up to the podium and told their favorite stories about my parents or said how much they would miss them. It was the only way I could get through was let it go by in a blur. Finally, it was my turn to step up to the podium and say what I needed to say.

My knees were shaking, and the room was so silent as I took the steps up towards the podium and lowered the microphone. "Hi, everyone," I said nervously, not sure if I should smile or what. "I want to thank you all for coming here today to celebrate the lives of my parents. They meant a lot to many of you and the world to me. Their loss was so sudden; I still don't know what to make of it, to be honest with you. I'm just trying to get through all of this. So, I'm sorry if I don't say the right thing up here. But what I remember most about them is their love for each other and how it never faded. They were actually on their way to celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary when the accident happened, and I remember when my father told my mother he was going to take her on a trip. She was so excited; they both were. It was like watching two teenagers falling in love. They still were so excited to be together and knew how to have fun and laugh. I hope that one day I can learn from them and maybe have something similar with someone. I wish that to all of you as well. And while I miss them dearly, I am very glad that they are together because I couldn't imagine it being any other way."

I nodded and walked off stage, placing my hand on my stomach to help slow my breathing. I did the best I could, and that was better than I had expected.

Music began to play, ushering people out to the grave site, though many people began to come up to me and give their condolences. I smiled and nodded and shook hands as I moved through the sea of people.

But as I got to the back of the chapel I noticed an unfamiliar but handsome man amongst the guests. I wondered if he could be someone that married into the family or someone's date. He had gorgeous silky slicked back dark hair and tantalizing eyes. His suit looked much more expensive than anyone in town would ever dare to wear or purchase. And there was something almost taboo or devilish about him. I wasn't even sure what it was or why I was thinking about how handsome someone was at my parents' funeral, but I felt like I should ask how he knew the family.

"Umm, hi," I walked up to him and said awkwardly. He grinned at me in an almost impish way only adding to his handsome and mysterious demeanor. "I'm sorry, but I just didn't recognize you, and I was wondering if you were here with someone and maybe I missed it."

"Oh, how rude of me," he said, holding out his hand to shake. "My name is Jonathan. I'm not here with anyone. I actually knew your parents a little through some business dealings and mutual contacts." I narrowed my eyes at him and shook his hand. His skin was soft, telling me he obviously didn't do any work with his hands. I honestly couldn't think of how such a man would know my parents. Plus, he was being very vague about how he knew them. The whole thing was just odd. But I also didn't feel like grilling anyone in that environment.

"You did pretty well up there. If it were me, I probably would have fallen apart or just refused to speak at all," he added after I pulled my hand away. I smiled at him to let him know that was appreciated. It was nice to know that I didn't make a fool out of myself.

"Thank you for that. I'm glad I at least put on a good face. I was so sure I was going to embarrass myself. Hey, I need to head to the graveside service. I'm assuming I'll see there. But if I don't, thank you so much for coming. I'm sure it meant a lot to them," I said cautiously, sneaking past him to the door.

"No problem, but don't feel like you have to put on a face. Everyone knows you should be grieving," he called to me as I stepped out into the fading light outside.

When I got to their grave site, I saw that the caskets were already prepared to be lowered. The service was simple; just a prayer and some family putting trinkets or flowers on the caskets. Some people dabbed at their eyes while some totally lost it. I stayed silent as I fell apart on the inside while Rachel stood by my side and held my hand. Again, she became my rock. Maybe one day I would be able to do something great for her and make it up to her, but I hoped it wasn't because she lost her parents. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

Even though I should have been focused on the service and saying goodbye to my parents, the thought of Jonathan kept coming back to my mind. It kept bothering me like a fly or something buzzing by my head. He had looked so rich, way too rich to have been close enough to my parents to know who they were and that they were gone.

Even more disturbing was the fact that I found him to be handsome. I usually wasn't one to be boy crazy or anything, but there I was at my parents' funeral thinking about some man I didn't even know. Maybe it was the mystery of it all or that it was a good distraction from the pain.

As everyone left the grave site and parted ways, at least for the time being, I decided to let the thought go. I hadn't seen him in the crowd after that, and I was almost certain I would never see him again. It shouldn't have been something I was concerned about. I needed to get back to the ranch because I knew some of the family would be there. I didn't know when it became a tradition to cook or give food to the grieving family member, but I was pretty sure that was the plan. I had cleaned out the fridge in preparation, knowing everyone would at least be dropping off some sort of casserole or potato salad.

As I climbed into the passenger seat of Rachel's car, I finally saw him again. He was on his cell phone and several yards away, but he looked right at me and waved. I wasn't sure if it was a nice to meet you and goodbye sort of thing; or I want to talk to you again thing. But it didn't matter because I doubted he would be a guest at the ranch since he wasn't family. It was mostly going to be my aunts, uncles and a couple of cousins, and even they were only staying for a couple of hours. They were all eager to get back to their lives somewhere else. Like many they weren't fans of rural Texas the way I was. They all lived farther north.

"Who's that?" Rachel asked in a soothing voice, the same one she'd been using with me for days. I could tell she thought I was fragile like an old piece of glass that might just shatter any moment. She was probably right.

"I don't really know. He says his name is Jonathan. He said he knew my parents a little but didn't give a whole lot of detail on how. Isn't that weird?" I asked passively.

"Well, it could have been someone they knew when you were away at college. I do know he's pretty cute though," Rachel said offhandedly, though I knew what she was getting at. Before she found Mr. Right, she used boys as a fun distraction. She probably figured I could do the same. But I just wasn't that type.

"Well, it doesn't really matter. I'll probably never see the guy again, right?" It was a mostly rhetorical question, but she answered me anyway.

"You're probably right. It's a shame, though. He looked pretty wealthy, and he had a great smile." I shook my head, not understanding how she judged people. But I was amused by it. It was better than being miserable and keeping my mind on the losses I had faced.

We joked like that about normal things all the way home. It was nice, like old times for a little bit even though she was about to go halfway across the world from me. It was great to know we could still be that close and know each other so well; a comfort in my world of darkness.

A knock came at the door, and I wondered who it might be. All my family had cleared out of the house and it was around nine at night. Nobody had stayed around too long, which actually turned out to be a comforting thing. It was more exhausting than I had expected to entertain family. I guessed it was just because I was so used to being isolated; an only child whose parents' families and lives were in a way a mystery or at least something pushed back in my mind. They had kept in touch through e-mails, phone calls and Facebook instead of actually being present. It made no sense to suddenly start being together.

When I opened the door I was surprised to see Lauren standing there. I had told her and Miles about my parents the day before when I could handle giving them the news. Miles was already in Dallas and hard to reach while Lauren had been staying on the coast with her family. I hadn't expected to see her.

"Well, are you going to let me in?" she asked with mock anger. I opened the door wide, and she flew at me with a hug. "I couldn't just leave you hanging even if it meant driving a couple of hours to get here. Plus, I wanted to see if I could help Rachel pack. Or even help you polish off some of that great food I know you don't have room for."

Her humor was another relief, and she was unfortunately correct. Two large bowls sat on the kitchen counter because there was nowhere to keep them. I shut the door and led her into the living room where Rachel was bringing her stuff out to re-pack. She had pretty much pulled it all out while staying with me. She was one of those girls who had a wardrobe change at least three times a day.

The two girls also hugged before they both sat on the floor and began packing. I went into the kitchen to fill a bow with some macaroni salad for Lauren. "Thank you, dear," she said as I handed it to her along with a spoon. She was using a fake Australian accent to be funny.

We spent a good hour laughing with each other and packing, but it had to end too soon. We all walked out and packed the back of Rachel's pickup with her luggage and squeezed in it together. And I took off towards the airport while the other two girls blasted music and began to sing along. I was driving what was soon to be my truck because Rachel couldn't take it with her, so she gave it to me to use since my parents' car was totaled.

I let the simple banter fill my head as we took the two hour long drive to the airport where we would be saying goodbye to our friend for a long time. Once she was in New York I knew she wouldn't be looking to come back to Guerra any time soon no matter what she said. The ending of so many eras were coming my way, and it frightened me. In the light of day the next morning, I was going to be completely alone for the first time in my life. How was I going to handle that?

# Chapter Six

The next morning, when my alarm went off around six a.m. I wasn't exactly sure what was ahead of me. The ranch had been slightly neglected over the past week while I dealt with all the things I had to do for my parents and the funeral. Of course, I had cared for the animals, but I had done the minimum. It was going to be my first real day running the ranch by myself, and it was going to be tough. I wasn't even going to use any of the ranch hands because I wasn't sure yet if I could afford them or not or how many I needed. I was determined to try to take care of the first week myself and then see what I absolutely needed help with.

The first thing I did was pull on some old boots, a pair of cut off shorts and a light button down top. I knew it would cover me from the sun but keep me cool because it was so lightweight. I decided a sports bra underneath was best...well it was the only one I had. _I need to make a trip to the store to get some more appropriate attire_ , I thought.

As I walked outside the sun was coming up in the east, making everything shine brightly under its first rays of the day. I had made myself a list based on what I knew from growing up there. The first thing I needed to do was milk the cows. So, I headed towards them. Some of them were just waking up while others were already on the move. I led them one by one into the barn where they could eat happily while I washed their udders and milked them. By the time I was done with that I had so much milk I didn't know what to do with it, and I still had another round to go later in the afternoon. Cows had to be milked twice a day generally. At least that's what I learned when I was like four or five.

I knew they had a deal with one of the local companies. I would have to find the phone number to call to make sure that service was continued. I left out a couple of gallons for myself and moved onto the chickens; feeding them and picking the eggs. Luckily we only had six chickens, so most of the eggs were used by my family. But now I would have to sell some. I thought about making a website for the ranch so people knew we had excess to sell, but I wasn't sure when I would find the time.

For the moment being, I carried the eggs and two gallons of milk inside to put in the fridge which I had already cleaned out by sending half the food home with Lauren. It was finally time for me to have a little breakfast even though I was way too exhausted already to cook it. That was clearly why my mother did the cooking while my dad worked the land.

So, I stuck my head under the cool faucet and sat down with a cup of instant coffee for a minute just to chill and cool off. One thing I had to say for the whole place is that the air conditioning was still working great. If it ever went out, I wouldn't know what to do with myself.

After I drank my coffee I was able to get up and make some eggs and bacon for myself. It didn't taste as good as my mother's, but it was pretty wholesome considering. I actually felt proud of myself and energized when I was done and washed off my dishes. It was time to get back out there.

I spent from nine until noon doing everything I could think of from checking and repairing fences to bathing and brushing the horses. I even planted some seeds in the garden and pulled some of the vegetables that were ready. I kept myself pretty busy so that I didn't have to think about how alone I was or how I was never going to get to brag about how good I was doing to my father. I would never cook another meal with my mother or go shopping with her.

Those thoughts began to creeped back in as I slowed down, raking the manure and other items from the horses' stall while they ran around in their corral.

I tried so hard not to sniffle or cry, but tears constantly began to sting my eyes and cheeks as I recalled the first time my father let me ride a horse or the first calf we helped birth together. It was getting to be too hard.

Just as I was about to head in for lunch, when I saw a silver Mercedes pull into the long, dirt driveway in front of the gate that led onto the property. I really didn't want to see anyone at the moment, but considering the fact that the car was so expensive and had tinted windows, it made me curious as to who it could possibly be.

I sighed and walked up to the gate to meet the person in the car. I had more work to do, and I didn't even look the part to be talking to anyone. I was sure I was covered in dirt and sweat among other things.

I watched the driver get out and could see that it was a man in designer dark jeans and a polo, but his back was turned to me. I could not tell who he was. The light blinded me, and I tried to squint to make out his features as he turned around to face me. That's when I realized I knew exactly who the man was. It was Jonathan; the handsome, mysterious man from the funeral. For a moment I caught a look of surprise on his face that I wasn't sure of the reason for. But then he caught himself and smiled as he approached the other side of the gate.

"Well, it looks like we meet again "I said, trying not to feel too self-conscious about the way I looked. I was going to spend most of my days looking like that from then on. So, I'd have to get used to it and so would anyone who wanted to be around me.

"Yes, it does. It's nice to see you again, Star, but I was almost entirely sure that you'd have moved on now and left town. But it looks like you're in the thick of it." He looked me up and down with a smirk, and I suddenly felt an odd chill run through me. I had always been pretty, but I wasn't used to being looked at by guys like Jonathan.

"Yeah, I have been trying to do this whole ranch thing by myself. Hard work doesn't exactly look that attractive," I admitted with a shrug. "I've lived here on the ranch for a year now, though. I came back after college because I loved it here so much. The big city just wasn't for me. The ranch is actually being transferred to me, so as long as I pay the bills, I can stay here. This is pretty much my home now. As you can tell, I'm still sort of processing that." I nodded and tried not to stare at his hazel eyes or his yet again perfect hair. I could tell through his navy polo that he was probably ripped under there. I imagined that the guy paid for a personal trainer and a team of nutritionists to stay looking like that.

A few strange and confused looks crossed his face, but I ignored it. I was happy to see him for whatever reason. It was probably because I was so lonely being on that ranch without my parents, but there was also something that drew me to the rich stranger. "Well, there's nothing wrong with a little hard work and getting a little dirty sometimes. Your father, I think, would have agreed with me on that." He winked at me when he said it, forcing me to hold back an obvious gasp. I wasn't sure why he was there, but something about being there with him kind of made my brain melt. It probably didn't help that it was hot enough out there to boil an egg.

"I've still got a couple of things to do on the ranch, of course, but would you like to come inside for some tea? I'd like to think I make some pretty good southern peach tea," I suggested, trying to tempt him.

"Yeah, that would be nice, actually. But why don't you let me try my hand at the tea so that you can finish what you're doing and get washed up. I'm sure it's been a long day for you already." I nodded and opened the gate to let him in, trying not to do something dumb like trip or bat my eyes at him.

He walked past me and led the way into the house like he was in charge. He had clearly been by a couple of time before, but that confidence was what I noticed. Something about it made me like him even more even though I hardly knew more than his name.

***

It took me about an hour to finish up the rest of my tasks and get cleaned up. I felt like I was peeling off layers of skin scrubbing all of the dirt and sticky dried sweat off. I still hadn't milked the cows, but I figured they could wait until evening.

I came back out into the living room with some nice jeans on and a tee shirt. My hair was back down and blow dried to the best of my ability. But more than anything I felt better.

As I peeked my head into the kitchen I saw Jonathan filling our glasses with tea. I was skeptical because he definitely wasn't from the south. He didn't even have a Texas accent. I took a sip as I leaned against the counter, and I was pleasantly surprised. It tasted like something straight out of Georgia. "Have you ever lived in Georgia?" I asked offhanded, but I was surprised when he nodded.

"I've lived a lot of places," he explained as he walked with me to the living room where we sat down to relax with our tea. It felt nice to just sit there and relax with someone else in the house. "My family moved around quite a few times because of my father's job. I spent the bulk of my childhood in Ohio, though. Texas was the last place we ended up, and for some reason it just suited me."

I looked at him strangely and took another swig of my peach iced tea. What he was saying just didn't fit the image I had of him.

"So, I'm sorry for this, but I'm still a little confused as to how you knew my parents. I guess I must have been in college when you met them, and I was too out of it at the funeral to really push for any information."

"Yes, that's right. I got to know them, your father in particular, pretty well about three years ago. You must have been at college. I became an advisor of sorts to them."

That still seemed pretty vague. But I didn't see any reason to push him out of the house for it. It just wasn't my business yet. So, I decided to leave it alone.

"So, is it just you or do you have a boyfriend here with you?"

I wasn't sure if it was just making conversation or if he was asking for a reason, but I was quick to answer.

"It's just me which seemed like a good idea until now. Until about a week ago, it hadn't been a big deal. I had a lot of friends who I grew up with in town, but they've all kind of moved out and on, you know? One's married; she's the one who went through all this with me. I took her to the airport last night to force her to go be with her new husband. She wanted to stay behind for me, but I couldn't let her do that."

"I couldn't imagine how hard this must be for you, especially facing this practically alone. I'm no expert, and I don't know you, but it didn't seem like any of the family was very helpful or very close to you. How are you holding up?" Other than Rachel, for the most part, he was the first one to actually want to know the real answer to that question. Everyone just dismissed or assumed things about my feelings.

"I'm just doing the best I can. I certainly didn't expect to lose them both at once or so soon. I mean, they were headed off to celebrate their 30th anniversary. The timing was bad. Of course, not that there's good timing for that, but it just feels wrong. And now I have their ranch, and it almost feels selfish. I didn't want it because they passed. And I just keep replaying that night in my head, how they were so happy when they left and then the next time I saw them..." I trailed off, pretty sure he didn't want the gory details of that.

"You can talk about it if you want. If not that's alright, but I would imagine keeping things to yourself just makes the grief build," Jonathan suggested. There was a comfort in his presence and in his words that felt like it was keeping me there alive. And the way he honestly cared made me feel like he must have had a good heart.

"It was just, when I got there I had to identify my father's body. And my mother was on the verge of being a vegetable. I had to decide to let her go. It was almost like the worst possible scenario for me." I looked down at my feet as the conversation got serious. Jonathan sat in respectful silence as we sipped out tea.

Eventually, though, I knew he would have to leave. That was the worst thought because anything was better than being on that ranch alone at that moment. But soon he stood up to go. "Well, I don't want to keep you. I'm sure you have a lot more to do here." He nodded and got up, walking towards the door. But as he opened it he turned back around and looked thoughtful. "Would you like to go out for dinner?" he asked suddenly. I wasn't sure if he meant right then and there or some time.

"Let me think about it," I offered, not sure what else to say. So, he gave me a card with his number on it and I waved goodbye. Once he was gone, all I was left with was silence.

I took care of the cows and finished everything else up before putting the horses back in their stalls. As I entered the empty kitchen it seemed haunted with the family that once occupied it. Suddenly, dinner alone in an empty kitchen made me want to vomit. I pulled out my phone and dialed the number Jonathan had given me.

# Chapter Seven

"Hey, Jonathan? This is Star. I think I'll take you up on the whole going out for dinner thing," I said nervously. He probably thought I was crazy. Or worse, he had already eaten or was comfortable at home with some other woman and now I called.

"Oh, alright. I'll be right back over there to pick you up as soon as I get ready," he answered quickly. I could hear him shuffling around like he was already preparing to come pick me up. Was I really going to ride in a Mercedes with a handsome man to go out to eat?

"Okay, I'll go get ready too." I hung up the phone and instantly panicked. I had never been on a real date before; if that's even what it was I was doing with Jonathan. I mean, I'd had a beer with a guy, seen a movie or hung out in his dorm room. But I had never been on a real adult date where it was more about chivalry and romanticism and less about making out and staring at each other's' bets features if you catch my drift. I didn't have anything super nice to wear that was on par with the kind of things I imagined Jonathan wore on dates; like tuxes. But what I had was going to have to be good enough for wherever he was taking me.

I just went with a white dress with blue flowers on it that landed above my knee and a pair of boots that weren't completely torn up. In fact, they had blue rhinestones on them that almost matched the blue flowers on the dress. But I did leave my hair down the way I liked it.

It wasn't too long before a knock came at the door signaling that Jonathan had come to pick me up. At first I found myself leaping across the room towards the door before I decided to slow it down as not to seem strange or desperate. Then, I opened the door to see that he was dressed rather casually too, still in what seemed to be his signature jeans and a polo. Though, it was a red polo this time.

"Hi," I said as he led me out to his car. "I don't think I've ever been in a car like that before," I admitted as he closed the door behind me like a gentleman.

"Really?" he asked, looking at me sideways before taking off out of the driveway. I had to hang on for dear life as the acceleration plastered my head to the headrest.

"Really," I squeaked out before we both broke into a laugh.

"Sorry about that. I'm usually driving alone," Jonathan explained as he shifted gears. "I guess you really are a country girl."

I nodded. "What about you? You said you moved a bunch of places." I looked to him for an answer, very curious to know more about him.

"Well, like I said I spent the most years in Ohio, though we moved a couple times there too. At the age of 12 is when the moving really started. I lived in Georgia for a year and then went back up north, living in Connecticut for three years and then Michigan for another two. We came to stay in Texas with some family over the summer after I graduated high school, and my mother insisted on staying. I went to college in Dallas and then just stuck around. I liked it better by the beach."

He was becoming more and more like a real person by the minute. I smiled at him as we pulled up to a bar and grill. It seemed to be like a pretty hip and casual; environment. We walked in and found a booth in the dark lighting. The menu had everything from fancy pasts dishes paired with wine down to bar food and beer.

I let Jonathan just order whatever for us so that we had a table full of things like onion rings, fries and wings as well as a bottle of wine. He spent the first little bit telling me jokes and things that made me laugh like the fact that he was a clumsy child with acne. I couldn't even imagine that. "I bet you had guys falling all over you from day one and that you were the sweet shy girl," he said, trying to guess what I was like. I laughed again at exactly how wrong he was.

"You are so far off!" I squealed, gasping for air in between giggles. I'm the resident party girl here in Guerra. I gave my parents so much crap staying out at the beach for hours deep into the night and stumbling in with my guy friends or my friend Rachel way past curfew and possibly drunk. It was a regular routine, especially in the summer. I even got my friends to go skinny dipping in the ocean once. In fact, that's how I spent my 24th birthday; partying on the beach. It was like old times coming in that house again with my best friend Miles carrying me and my mother shaking her head."

Jonathan made a face, scrunching up his features in a totally cute yet unattractive way. "Something about that just doesn't seem right. I mean, I'm sure you looked great doing it, but I wouldn't want all those germs and fish swimming around certain areas," he admitted with a chuckle. "I like the way the ocean looks but the idea of critters does freak me out."

"A big guy like you?" I asked, wondering if he was playing games with me. "I guess I just don't get it. I mean, my father used to have me catch little fish with my hands and even took me crabbing once. But then again, I've touched udders so after that I guess there's not much else to be grossed out by." As we talked, I realized that for the first time since their passing, I was able to talk about my parents and memories I had with them without breaking down. Jonathan was having a positive effect on me. I wanted to cling to him for dear life even though I'd just met him.

"You're definitely different, Star. Which reminds me, where did you get the name? It's very unusual." I took a sip from my wine glass and a bite from another onion ring before answering him. The food was so good and for some reason, I suddenly felt like I hadn't eaten a decent meal in a long time.

"Star actually isn't my given name; Samantha is. But when I was about eight or nine helping my father on the ranch he decided to start calling me Star. So, from then on it just stuck. That's what people have called me ever since." The look on his face was that of confusion, and I broke out in laughter once again. "Around here, everyone has some kind of nickname which is generally more popular than their given name."

"Really? I guess since I'm from up north mostly, I just don't get it. We didn't do that up there." I burst out laughing, and he followed. There was a slight chance that I'd had a few too many drinks. I never had been a very heavy drinker. I could work on the ranch with the best of them, but drinking for me was like for any typical woman of my size. In other words, I got tipsy pretty quickly. And the food, no matter how good it was, wasn't helping as much as it should have. Luckily, Jonathan seemed to be tolerating the alcohol pretty well.

"I imagine that if I were ever to go up north there would be a lot of things I didn't understand, so don't feel too bad. I've heard people say it's almost like leaving the country entirely to come down here. Actually, my mom always said that. She didn't always live in a small town like Guerra. She was a city girl through and through." Thinking about my mother was threatening to ruin the good feeling. I really did miss her. "I miss her," I admitted with a sigh. There was no use in keeping it all in.

"I'm sure you do, and I'm sure even wherever she is she misses being with you as well." It was such a sweet thing to say, I almost reached out to hold his hand. He always seemed to have the right words at the right time. "But tell me about that. Why did she move if she was a city girl?"

I smiled at the memory of them telling me their love story. I made them a book about it on their 15th anniversary. "Her and my father just clicked right away, and they just weren't going to be without each other. But my father already knew he wanted to live out here and be a rancher. There was no other option for him. So, she got her Phoenix-like decorations; the ones that are still at the house now, and he got the ranch in Guerra." It made so much sense. Did everyone have a great story like that? I hoped I would one day.

"They always did seem to be very much in love even after all that time. Well, I think it may be time to pay the check and get out of here. We've been tying up their booth for two hours now," Jonathan announced, raising his hand to get the waiter over. Instead of waiting for the check, Jonathan just handed over his credit card. Were rich people really like that, not caring about the money they spent?

I looked at the clock and confirmed what he said. "It doesn't feel like it's been two hours," I told, him, feeling a bit of wonderment at how good he had been able to distract me. It probably helped that he was rather charming. For the first time I noticed that we had ended up somewhere scooting closer to each other, or at least I had scooted closer to him over the course of the evening.

Once the waiter brought his credit card back to him, he took my arm and helped me out to the car. I was pretty sobered up by then, but I figured he was trying to be a gentleman and do the right thing. As he climbed in and shut the door, I began to feel that loneliness threatening to creep back in again knowing that he was about to drop me back off at that empty house. I wanted to know how long it was going to be before I felt okay with that or got used to it. My biggest fear was that it would never happen.

By the time we pulled up in the driveway and I looked out the car window, I was feeling uneasy. I looked over at Jonathan who was getting out of the car so he could come around and let me out. He was a very good looking guy, and he had been so nice to me the whole day. I knew there were things I didn't know or understand about him and how he knew my parents, but all suspicions aside, I felt like I needed his company.

He began walking me up to the door almost voluntarily. I felt a little bit like I was on my way to the gallows or something. Just as he was about to say goodbye and leave for the evening, I decided to just try and make him stay. I gave my best smile. "Jonathan, would you like to come in for a little while? We can have another glass of wine. I know there are a few older bottles in there that should be really good and aged by now. My grandfather really loved wine." I met my eyes with his and blushed trying to focus on getting him to agree.

"Sure, I'd like that. Show me that wine?" He smiled and displayed his dimples as we walked inside together. He shut the door behind us, and I went to get the wine and glasses. There were two cabinets in our large kitchen that held racks of wine and six or seven bottles of various ages. I grabbed what looked like a good red and brought it out with two glasses.

"So, what do you think? I asked, passing it to him.

"This is a good brand and a good age. Let's open it." He used his keys to pop the cork, making a loud noise that filled the house. It was worth it just to get rid of the silence as he poured me a full glass and passed it to me, sniffing his like it was a flower.

I sat on the arm of the couch next to him as I took not so tiny sips from my wine. As Jonathan went to rest his arm on the couch he ended up brushing up against the bare skin of my leg. Suddenly, there was an awful lot of tension in the room. I was pretty sure I could have cut through it.

"So," I said, clearing my throat. "Do you have some significant other at home? Though, I probably should have asked before I drank with you," I teased, reprising his question to me earlier in the day.

He chuckled and knocked back the rest of his wine like a pro. It was kind of sexy.

"No. I've always been more of a loner and a business man. Of course, it doesn't help that sometimes I still see myself as that awkward young boy who no one wanted to sit next to at lunch. I often get advances but always seem like I don't know what to do with them." I threw back the rest of my wine as well and ended up going too far back so that he had to hang onto my leg and help catch me. But his hand lingered there afterward during a moment of intense silence as we looked at each other.

"More wine?" he asked my after a second, and I held out my glass to him as he reach over with the bottle. But as he poured, I lost my balance, slipping down the arm onto the catch. I landed awkwardly halfway on top of him and halfway stuck in the tiny space between him and the edge of the couch.

"Sorry," I whispered, struggling to get up, but all I succeeded in doing was putting myself farther up into his lap. I was about to stand up, but his hand slipped around my waste. I had a decision to make. Was the night going to end in an awkward PG goodbye or was I going to make a move? I was just tipsy enough that I thought I just might do the ladder.

# Chapter Eight

"You have pretty eyelashes for a guy." _Yes, that actually did come out of my mouth_ , I thought.

"Well thank you," he answered, sounding amused.

I couldn't help but notice that his hand was slipping down over my butt very slowly, like he was trying to be sneaky. I knew I had felt some sexual tension between us. It felt almost like a victory to be right. My breathing became quick and uneven as he swiped right over my round ass and snaked up my back leaving searing indents where his fingers landed. My spine was revolting against me, trying to force me to react by shivering or arching.

Then, Jonathan started using his strength to put a little pressure on my back. I was pretty sure he was trying to force me forward which would cause our lips to meet. I fought for a moment, trying to stand my ground. I was the party girl, not the drunken hook up girl, but I swore I felt a deeper connection with this strange man than just something carnal.

So, I let my muscles relax and gave in, leaning in towards him. Our noses touched first, sliding along each other. It was strange and sensual as we kept our eyes open and watched each other move and breathe. Then, our lips brushed ever so slightly as we still kept eye contact.

I pressed my body into him and up my arms around his neck, he held to my hips and butt tighter, squeezing my right cheek for good measure. And then our moths collided like we were diving right into each other.

His lips were soft, and I gasped as he parted my lips with his and slipped his warm, wet tongue in my mouth.

It wasn't like making out with a college guy at all. It was slow and meticulous, as we discovered every inch of each other's mouths; every bump, every tooth. My whole body was engulfed with an electric shock as Jonathan slowly moved his left hand onto my bare skin, rubbing at my calf. No one had ever been able to make me feel like this, it was an exciting experience.

Jonathan slipped my boots off, one-by-one. Letting them drop to the floor with a thud. He tucked his hands under my knees and pulled me up and back so that I was laying across him on the couch. I felt like I was about to become his play thing, but in a strange way, that was getting me going. I felt my panties getting wetter by the second, as Jonathan slid his hands up my bare legs stopping just above the knee and going back down.

I giggled once or twice as his fingers slid across my most ticklish places. Finally, he lifted my dress up so that my stomach and my white satin panties were exposed to him. I would have felt so self-conscious if it weren't for the liquid courage I'd been filling up with all night. Instead, I sighed as he placed his lips against my bare skin, kissing up from my ankle all the way up to my belly button and back down. I knew he must have been able to tell through my panties the affect he was having on me. I was sure I was soaking them, but he just kept exploring and teasing me, focusing on everywhere but where I wanted him to.

Jonathan's hands felt strong, but soft, as he grabbed my legs and brought them up so that my knees were bent. It made it easy for him to slide out from under me while allowing one of his hands to slide across my skin on the way. A strange whimper flew from my mouth, as it seemed that he was going away. But then I watched as he stood up and unbuckled his belt, sliding it from where it sat in his jeans and throwing it to the ground. Something came over me, and I felt like I had to be the one to take his clothes off.

I reached out and latched onto the bottom of his shirt and tugged. He came easily with a huge smirk on his face that he couldn't hide. I looked up at him as I unbuttoned his jeans and unzipped them, letting them slip to his ankles. It revealed that he was wearing black silk boxers.

"It's so sexy how innocent you look even though you're taking my clothes off," he whispered to me as he looked down at me and bent over so I could tug his shirt over his head. I reached out to feel of his skin, even under his shirt he was muscular and tan like someone from a movie.

Jonathan leaned down and kissed me on the mouth, instantly parting my lips. Our mouths smacked together and sucked on each other as the intensity of our connection grew. My heart was beating fast, and my stomach was tugging at me like I was at the top of a large hill on a roller coaster about to tip over the edge. My nails scraped against the flesh of his chest, and his hot breath was all over me as he left my lips and began to kiss down my neck to my chest.

Then, he yanked me to an upright position and pulled my dress over my head, making my curls go everywhere. He stood back and looked at my body as I sat in front of him in nothing but my bra and soaked panties. There was a shine in his eyes that was a mixture of lust and awe. No one had ever looked at me like that before. I had never found so much excitement in another human being before either.

Suddenly, he became ravenous and had a feral look in his eyes. He pushed me up against the arm of the couch and slid my panties off in one quick swipe. He then climbed onto the couch with me and placed each of my hands on my ankles. I braced myself for whatever was going to come next. He crouched low in front of me, teasing me with his fingers for just a second as he took in my scent. Then, he dipped his head low and flicked his tongue out of his mouth so that it slid across my clit in one quick motion. I surprised myself as I called out in shock and pleasure, his tongue leaving as quickly as it came.

"Mmmm," he commented, looking up into my eyes before dipping back down and repeating the motion, only this time his tongue lingered.

I closed my eyes as my breathing came in quick gasps. The pleasure of his tongue lapping against my most sensitive spot was overwhelming like the shock of static electricity. My legs shook weakly with the intensity until I willed myself to relax. His tongue slipped down past my clit and found my sweet, wet center, which was screaming, for him.

His slick tongue dove inside of me, exploring the pink, sensitive flesh, and I moaned softly, letting my legs go so they could rest gently across his back. He began to make his tongue stiffer and thrust it in and out of me, and my head fell back against the couch in pure ecstasy. I imagined and wondered what it would be like to have his shaft inside of me the same way, sliding in and out of my aching center.

I called out to him and ran my hands through his dark locks as my body began to feel like waves were coming over it. My legs began to quiver uncontrollably, and Jonathan reacted by sliding his tongue in deeper and faster, coaxing me to my zenith. As I released onto him, he lapped me up while my center pulsed in front of him. I balled my hands into fists until my whole body relaxed. It seemed to have taken a lot out of me, like I could fall asleep right there. And as Jonathan slid his arms underneath me and scooped me up in his arms, I thought that's what I was going to do.

I gave him directions to the hallway where my bathroom and bedroom were. I could feel my eyes fighting to stay open, and I was startled back to reality when he threw me down on my queen size bed.

"You didn't think I was done with you, did you?" he asked before pulling down his boxers.

And there he was, right there in front of me and totally bare. His tan color extended everywhere, and he was very well trimmed. His shaft was long and stood at attention as he crawled into the bed with me. As his member slid along the inside of my thigh, my center came to life again, making the bed sheets wet from my excitement.

"I guess I did," I whispered as he reached behind my back to pluck my bra off, unfurling my B cups. He leaned forward and sucked my left breast into his mouth, teasing the nipple with his tongue. Did he go to some kind of class to learn how to use his tongue like that?

I let him lay me down, and my hair spread out behind my head. He played with it, sliding it between his fingers. I closed my eyes and let him continue kissing and playing with my breasts. I was content with him staying there for a while even as they began to swell and ache a bit.

After a few moments, he moved to kiss down my body, and I felt his member slide down and back up my leg, coming very close to my wet center again. I gasped as it grazed my soft lips and hit the other leg as he raised himself up to his my lips.

"All of you tastes so sweet," he told me, allowing his shaft to have a mind of its own and tease me.

"Please," I begged him, wanting to know what it felt like to have him inside of me.

I reached down, trying to grab onto him until I finally stretched far enough to land on it. I wrapped my hand around him firmly and he gasped and arched his back at my touch. I gave him a few strokes and finally saw a reaction on his face as he bit his lip. Then, he looked at me in desperation and nodded his permission. I spread my legs wide and guided him to my opening, so that he could slide in on the slick sweetness my arousal was causing.

We both moaned as I let go and his shaft moved deeper inside of me. It was like he was finally locking in place where he was supposed to be, and my head collapsed back on the bed again, my breathing coming in shallow spurts. His body slid over mine, and I could see beads of sweat rising and pooling in the little creases between his well-defined muscles and over his brows. We just watched each other react as his shaft forced me to spread further for him, letting him reach new depths that felt better by the second.

Suddenly, he stopped and slid out of me, leaving me wanting. However, before I could even protest, he flipped me over so that I was on my knees. My butt was up in the air facing him, and he pulled my hips into him, plunging his shaft back deep inside of me. I screamed as he impaled me all the way through, slamming into my G-spot and even beyond. He gathered my hair into his hand and used it as leverage. Then, I felt it, that shakiness and electricity that came in waves until my insides began to pulse around him. He groaned loudly as I squeezed him to his climax as well.

We collapsed in the bed next to each other, panting and trying to catch our breaths and slow out hearts. As we calmed, Jonathan patted his chest for me to lay my head on it. He began to sweetly run his fingers through my blonde curls. It felt soothing to be there with him like that. It almost felt as if we had known each other much longer. Just as I felt myself start to drift to sleep, though, Jonathan asked me a question that threw me for a loop. "Were you considering selling the ranch, Star?"

With those words, I froze, and I felt like I might throw up. My stomach was winding itself up tightly so that I felt queasy. It was always my first sign that something was off. Why was he asking about selling the ranch while we were lying bed together after having sex? Something told me I needed to tread carefully and think before I gave any kind of response.

My mind went back to all the time I spent with him and all the conversations we had. Not once did he ever offer more details about how he knew my parents, and while I had been spilling my guts to him, he had been vague most of the time. In the back of my mind, I had always felt something was a little off about Jonathan, but I had always pushed it back because I was grieving or because I enjoyed his company.

Now that the excitement was over, I worried that I had already gotten in way too deep sleeping with this man and liking him so much. I had told him so many things and let him in the house I'd grew up in with my parents. I wondered if he could have been hiding something from me. I never figured out why he showed up to the ranch in the first place. I felt a little duped to be honest.

I decided it was best to hold back a little more until I knew more about Jonathan and what he could be hiding. It wasn't in my best interest to be honest anymore.

"Umm, I don't really know about that, Jonathan," was what I gave him as my body tensed up, knowing something strange was going on.

# Chapter Nine

"I just don't really think that's appropriate to ask. I just found out I got the place," I continued, lashing out this time. Jonathan put his right hand up in surrender.

"I'm sorry, we don't have to talk about that if you don't want to," Jonathan said, backtracking immediately. I was pretty sure he sensed my discomfort with the question. He seemed nervous at my reaction. "I was just trying to make conversation with you. I really didn't mean anything by it," he said, trying to cool me off. So far, it wasn't working, though. Something just felt so strange about the question. It sounded almost like there was a specific reason he wanted to know like something way too fast and creepy like him wanting to live with me. Or maybe there was something entirely more sinister than that.

"Why would you even ask something like that?" I asked, feeling hostile as I pulled away from him. "I mean, we're lying in bed together; we just had sex. I don't know how that question even makes sense right now or ever really." I looked to him for a reaction, but to my dismay he simply shrugged as if he wasn't even sure himself if he knew why he had asked that question. He was so confusing to me at the moment, and I didn't know what to do. He was in my house. I couldn't just take off running. And I couldn't forget about the time we had spent together. My head seemed to be spinning and changing directions all the time when it came to Jonathan.

"I really was just trying to make conversation, Star. I didn't mean to offend you or make you feel strange or angry. But I do understand how it sounds now," he admitted. I stood up and pulled my panties back on along with a clean button down shirt, but I didn't button it yet. I passed him his boxers instead.

"Yeah, it sounds strange," I told him, feeling desperate to be alone all of a sudden.

"I know now that it sounded better in my head," he insisted as he slid his boxers back on in compliance. "I'm really sorry for starting something. I would really rather just lay here and cuddle with you instead of making you angry. I have been having such a good time, and I seem to have lost my mind momentarily. Is there any way that we can just let it go and you can get back in the bed with me?"

His eyes pleaded with me. It was the first time Jonathan had ever let anything slip from his mouth that wasn't perfect. I could have just been cracking and chipping away at the surface only to find something bigger inside there that I didn't like. The idea of that frightened me, especially after how far I had gone with him. If that was the case, though, pressing the issue could chip away at him so much that he exploded into some kind of monster. Or I could have been ruining a good thing with my sudden paranoia.

I sighed and slid into the bed next to him again cautiously. Since he was letting it go and knew he had said something strange, it seemed like the best choice at the moment to let it go myself. It just wasn't worth the aggravation to continue to fight about it. Cuddling with him did sound like a pleasant thing to do. Plus, his company was the only thing in what seemed like forever that kept me feeling normal and like I wasn't going to just lose it and break down every second. I wasn't about to ruin that over something that turned out to be silly.

I flashed him a smile as he was trying to gauge my behavior and then leaned down to give him a soft kiss on the lips. Jonathan pulled me into him as the kiss became more passionate. If I wasn't exhausted I would have been willing to go for another round. Something about his touch just really got me going.

His hands slid up my back, and he rubbed my nipples with his thumbs again. I climbed on top of him, and he took my hips in his hands to held me there as we continued to kiss. Finally, we allowed each other to breathe for a moment. Then, Jonathan started to tickle my sides, making me laugh and fall to the side of him, gasping for air.

Once the laughter subsided, I had to apologize. "Jonathan, I'm sorry about snapping at you. I didn't really mean it. You know what I've been through the past few days, and I guess it just rubbed me the wrong way. Let's just relax and have a good time like we have been. I really have enjoyed spending time with you." I didn't know if it was too much information to tell him considering how suspicious I suddenly was of him. But it was pretty much the truth.

"I'm sorry too, Star," he said with a sigh. "I should have realized how that might sound and been more sensitive. You only have to talk about what you're ready to talk about. I'll let you start the conversations from now on," he said, feeling my bottom lip with his thumb.

I laid my head back on his chest for a moment, and he went back to playing with my hair. But suddenly, it just didn't feel like enough. "I'm not as tired as I thought I was," I admitted to him, making his chest rumble with a loud chuckle.

"Well, then let's get up and do something," he suggested, sliding out from under me then offering his hand. I looked down at myself skeptically, wondering what we were going to do with me dressed like that. But then I got an idea.

"Let's get dressed, and then you can meet me in the living room," I told him excitedly.

"You really want me dressed?" Jonathan teased. I laughed and flipped my hand at him to let him know I thought he was being silly.

"It's up to you, but I'm getting dressed." I pulled on some jeans shorts and a shirt that had the American Flag on it; nothing fancy. It wasn't like he hadn't already seen all of me. There was no point for formalities anymore.

I slid across the wood floor with my bare feet and dared to enter my parents' bedroom. I knew there was a special gem from my great grandparents sitting in their bedroom closet gathering dust. If it still worked, I thought Jonathan might get a kick out of it. Sure enough, I found the old thing buried behind some books and worn boots. I carefully pulled it out and carried it into the living room where I found a shirtless Jonathan already waiting for me. "I opted for a compromise," he joked as he approached me and I placed the phonograph on the floor. I began to dust it off carefully, revealing the shiny dark green paint.

"I can see that," I told him, trying not to show a reaction as he squatted down in front of me.

"Is that what I think it is?" he asked as I tried to make sure the needle and everything was balanced before I wound it up. I wondered what kind of music it might play. I hoped it was something good.

"It's a phonograph," I told him as I began to wind. "My great grandparents brought it with them from Germany when they came here to America. My grandmother told me all the time how they loved to dance even though they were just farmers. I have pictures of them somewhere," I offered before letting it go. I instantly recognized the song that started playing. It was "Bei Mir Bist du Schön". It was a popular Swing song during the rise of the Nazis in Germany. It was pretty catchy.

Jonathan held out his hand, and I took it. He pulled me up on my feet and began to dance with me. I was shocked at how skilled he was. He swung me around and threw me in the air, leaving me breathless. What wasn't this guy good at? "Do you know how to do everything?" I asked him with a smile as we danced around each other.

"Nope, I don't know the capital of every country," he said, making me double over in a laugh so that I couldn't keep dancing. It just proved to me that there was every reason to have ended that fight and had him stick around. My cloud of depression was lifting significantly, and I was feeling happy again. All my stupid suspicions must have grown from my anxiety over having too much to do and no clue how to get any of it done by myself. There was no reason for me to continue to be miserable, and I was almost certain my parents would have been happy to know that I was having a good time in the midst of all the chaos and tragedy.

"Well, that's good to know," I replied, taking his hand again so that we could dance again. I didn't know how long we did that. I ignored my screaming burning legs and the sweat pouring off of me. I just enjoyed the moment the way that I used to. In the back of my mind, I made a note to call Rachel about it considering how cute she had thought Jonathan was at the funeral.

After some time, we stopped and sat on the floor. The clock told me that it was nearly eleven thirty at night, and I still needed to get up early as usual to start the next day on the ranch.

"I think I need to take a shower and get to bed. You're welcome to stay the night, of course, in fact, I'd love you to. But I do have to get up early to get the work done on the ranch," I told Jonathan, looking at him.

"Sure, I'll stay the night, but how about a bubble bath? I'll even run it for you," he offered. I nodded.

There was no way I was turning down that offer. He got up and headed to my bathroom, and I pulled out my phone, wanting to get a quick text into Rachel while he was out of the room. She would kill me if I waited to tell her.

Hey, I only have a minute. I hope you made it alright and are having a great time with your husband. Wanted to let you know Mr. Cute a.k.a. Jonathan showed up at the ranch this morning, and we have practically been together since. Thought you'd want to know. Getting in the tub now!

I hit send and then laughed at how much like a teenage girl I sounded, but maybe that was a good thing. Shouldn't a good relationship and life keep you young? My parents certainly had that going for them.

My phone buzzed. Apparently she had answered me immediately.

OMG Star! You deserve every moment of happiness you can get. You just snatch it up and go get in that bath. But do NOT forget to call me tomorrow. Oh, and things are great with the hubby. He's so happy to have me here with him.

I smiled at the message but almost jumped out of my skin when I heard Jonathan's voice. He was a little closer than I had anticipated. "Should be done in a moment. The water is nice and warm, so you might want to get ready before you miss out," he suggested with a wink, leaning up against the wall. I slid my phone back into my pocket and smiled at him as I stood up and walked past him into the bathroom. I pulled out a towel for him and a pink robe for myself. Bubbles were rising in the tub as I began to strip off my clothes.

Suddenly, Jonathan's arms were wrapped around me, he kiss my neck. I shivered as it both tickled and felt great at the same time. He slowly slid my shorts and panties down. It was a bit of de ja vu for me. Once he was done with me, he lifted me into the tub and turned off the water. It was nice and warm. I watched as he put on a show, taking his pants off again and then his boxers. His physique was so perfect I didn't think I was ever going to get used to it.

As he slid into the tub across from me, he pulled me into his lap and locked lips with me while he grabbed my loofa and sponged some soapy water over my back. It loosened all the muscles that had tightened up while I was working my butt off on the ranch all day. I began rocking my hips against him, feeling him get hard underneath me while he continued to soap up my body. Before I knew it, his hard member had slipped inside me once again and there was no resisting it.

So, I rode him in the tub, splashing warm soapy water over the sides until we both reached climax once again.

# Chapter Ten

I woke up the next morning to the bright light streaming in through the windows. It was my second official day taking care of the ranch myself, and I had already fallen short. My body was a little achy, but I felt very satisfied remembering the events from the night before. As my hand landed on the bed next to me, I realized I was the only one in it. Where had Jonathan gone?

For just a second I panicked thinking that maybe he had taken off on me after I fell asleep. He wouldn't have been the first guy in history to do that to someone. But as I sat up and listened, I could hear the sounds of pans sizzling and feet sliding across the wood floors. He was still there just in the kitchen. He must have been making breakfast for me.

I finger brushed my hair and tiptoed into the kitchen to see what was going on. Jonathan's back was turned to me, but he seemed to notice instantly when I entered the room. I wasn't as sneaky as I thought. "Well, there goes the idea of bringing you breakfast in bed," he said without even turning around. I could hear the smile in his voice. "I hope you enjoy eggs, ham and potatoes. I even made some chili just in case you were that kind of girl."

I slid into one of the seats in front of the bar and placed my chin against my fist. "I am absolutely that kind of girl," I admitted happily. It sounded absolutely delicious. "And don't worry about the breakfast in bed thing. I needed to get up so I can take care of the ranch anyway. In fact, I should really be out there right now." I squinted up my face at the idea of going out there in the heat instead of being inside where the A/C and one of the hottest guys on the universe were. It just wasn't a logical choice.

"The only thing that's immediate is milking the cows, and I'm sure they can wait until after breakfast," he told me, placing a plate full of delicious food in front of me. "I promise I will be out of your hair as soon as we eat." He raised his hands in surrender before making his own plate and sitting it next to me before turning off the burners. I made a pouty face at him about his statement. I didn't really want him out of my hair.

"Don't give me that look; that's not what I meant. I have business to take care of, and so do you. You'll only be distracted by me if I stick around, and you know it. Once your job is done, I can come by any time you'd like. You have my number." He flashed a devilish grin my way, and I blushed. I was feeling a little shier without all the alcohol in my system. It was probably a little late for that, though. He was so right, though. I was never going to go out on the ranch and do anything with him lounging around the house shirtless and cooking for me. As much as the idea of being alone again sucked, I needed to prove to myself that I could handle all that work.

"Okay, I think I can live with that," I replied before sticking my fork into the eggs. I took a bite, expecting just the typical southern breakfast, but I was amazed. "Oh my gosh, it's another thing you're great at. Did you go to charm school or something?" I asked, pointing to the eggs and chili.

"No, but I did have an aunt who always wanted to have her own cooking show. The chili is her recipe." He started eating at his own meal, and I went back to mine. To say I was impressed would have been an understatement. Even beyond the initial attraction and all the drinking, he still seemed to have a good heart to me. And he was sharing more about his life. The paranoia was not only in check but long gone.

We ate breakfast together like a real couple, occasionally gazing into each other's eyes and smiling. It felt yet again like we had been together a long time, like we were already some kind of power couple. I dared not ruin by asking him if we really were a couple or if we were "going steady" or whatever. I didn't think adults decided like that. It either happened or it didn't, right?

My phone started buzzing, and I knew instantly who it would be. Rachel was dying to hear details, but I really couldn't give them to her with him right next to me. So, I excused myself outside for a moment and walked a few yards away from the house.

"Rachel, he's still here!" I squealed into the phone in a fit of annoyance.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I had no idea. But that's a good thing, right? Like you woke up and still like the way he looks and want him to be there?" I laughed at Rachel. She was married to a rich man and living in Manhattan but still trying to live vicariously through a girl who just gained a ranch because her parents died and who hadn't had a real boyfriend in over a year.

"Yes, I still want him here. He made me breakfast, and he's probably going home soon. But I bet he's probably wondering why I had to take such an early phone call outside," I said through gritted teeth.

"Nah, guys know girls do this. I'm sure he knows exactly why you're out there. So, how far did it go? Does he look as good under the clothes as he does with them on?" I rolled my eyes. It was too bad she couldn't see my reaction.

"Yes, he looks even better actually," I said, exasperated. "Hey, how about I call you back this evening?" I asked her, wanting to get back in there with him.

"Of course. You go get 'im!" She hung up on that note, and I took the embarrassing walk back into the house. Had she been right about him knowing we were talking about him?

When I got back inside I was greeted with a kiss on the cheek. He had already cleared away our plates. What a gentleman. I noticed that he had also slipped his shirt on. "Are you leaving already?" My voice came out a little whiny, and I kind of wanted to slap myself for it. I sounded needy. But I guess the right guy could bring that out in any kind of girl.

"Yes, I am. But, how about you walk me out and maybe we'll talk about the next time I can fix you breakfast," he said with a wink, making me blush yet again. We held hands as we walked out onto the ranch and towards the gate that led to the driveway. His silver car sat there in all its perfection, just waiting for him to return to normal life. I couldn't help but worry a little what would happen to us once we returned to the everyday routine. I hoped that as strong a connection as we had built we would still be doing pretty well. I could easily see myself getting into the routine of a girl falling in love with that man.

He leaned me up against the driver's side door and began kissing me passionately, running his hand up my leg. I was still wearing my gown which was much more like a slip. The benefit of living out in the country like that though was that no one could see other than my neighbor who I assumed was still asleep considering she was just an older woman who trained horses. "I'm going to miss you," I said. I couldn't help it; it just popped out of my mouth. He smiled and licked my earlobe once.

"I feel the same way. Don't worry; if you haven't already called me, I'll be sure to call you later. It's going to be a long day thinking about that long hair of yours and those cute little legs." He looked me up and down once as I moved away so he could get in the car. Then, I waved as he started it and pulled out of the driveway in his typical racing fashion. I bit my lip, thinking about how amazing the night before had been, and a whirlwind of emotions raced through me. But it was time to get to work.

***

I came out of the barn and spotted a figure walking towards me. I acquainted and hooded my eyes with my hand to see who it was. It was a woman with a long braid that she had on one side of her chest. Her hair was white, and she was wearing a pair of jeans and a western shirt. It was Ms. Beasley, my neighbor. Other than the funeral, I hadn't seen much of her. I had gathered that it was because she was so busy. She trained horses and sometimes held riding lessons on her property which was just east of ours. It was significantly smaller.

She had been a family friend for a long time. In fact, a lot of the time I referred to her as my grandmother since I had barely known my own. She was a sweet woman who helped care for me when I was little and my parents were busy. She was spunky too. I had always hoped I'd have that kind of spirit when I got older.

I waved to her before wiping some of the dirt and sweat form my brow. I had spent the last hour catching up on everything and had made such good time. But I was in desperate need of a break. Hopefully, Mrs. Beasley was going to be a good excuse.

She walked up to me and silently wrapped her arms around me. She knew that there were no words to describe the loss that we shared in my parents' death. As she pulled away I saw the shine of tears in her eyes.

"How have you been doing, Star?" she asked me honestly. It made me think of the way Jonathan had asked. He was still on my mind even through all my hard work. I didn't know how I was going to get through the day.

"I've been trying to keep busy. I got the ranch and everything on it, so I've just been struggling with trying to figure all this out myself. It's pretty tiresome, but I think my father would be happy. We actually talked about it just before he died. I finally got the courage to tell him this is what I wanted to do. This wasn't how I wanted to do it, though." I nodded along as I spoke.

"Oh, dear, of course not. And I think your daddy would be very proud of you right now for trying so hard. I'm sorry I didn't get over here sooner, but I've been real busy and then I hurt my back. These old bones aren't as fit as they used to be," she said with a laugh while flexing her arm as a joke. "But I want you to know I'm here if you need advice or just to talk. I remember when I lost my parents, and it was like the world was ending for me even though I was already an adult. I see a lot of myself in you sometimes."

"I'll take that as a compliment," I told her, patting her on the back. "Thank you for the offer. It does get lonely over here in this empty house sometimes. It's almost like it's haunted, and it's hard to think of anything else."

"Well, not to get in your business, but it didn't look like you weren't very alone this morning," Ms. Beasley teased. I was a little embarrassed to know she saw that display of affection. She probably knew he'd spent the night. "Don't be embarrassed. It's not good for you to be alone. I was so stuck in my ways that I waited to look until it was too late. Tell me about him," she urged.

"Well, he said he knew my parents. I actually met him at the funeral, and we kind of hit it off. He's really handsome and sweet. It's very new, of course, but I'm just crazy about him right now." I looked up to see that there was a sudden look of concern on Ms. Beasley's face. "What is it Grandmother?" I asked her, feeling that weird thing in my stomach again.

"What was the man's name?" she asked, slowly.

"Jonathan," I said with a shrug, unsure of what the problem could be.

"Star, I don't want to kill your mood or disturb you, my dear, but has he asked you to sign anything?" I shook my head, not sure of what she was getting at. "That man was in the middle of trying to buy that ranch from your parents. You may not know too much about it yet, but they were in financial ruin. They were working, against their better judgement, with him in order to sell the home and ranch so they didn't lose everything financially. I think he's trying to fool you, Star. Please, be careful."

"I had no idea." It came out very quiet and weak. I was more talking to myself than to Ms. Beasley. But she responded anyway, hugging me again.

"It's going to be okay, dear. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and I have all the faith in the world that you can save this place. Just keep your chin up and your eyes open." I nodded as she walked away after imparting her words of wisdom.

As she looked at me with sympathy in her eyes, I could feel my chest getting heavy. I had been so sure Jonathan and I had gotten very close, close enough that he could and should have been honest with me if that was the case. Was that why he had shown up to the ranch the morning before? It was a scary thought, and I instantly felt betrayed. Jonathan had a lot of explaining to do; that was the only thing I knew for certain.

### To be continued...

### Thank you for reading!

Please visit your favorite eBook retailer to view the next books in this series.
Sex With The Billionaire

by

Carla Davis
Copyright © 2014 by Carla Davis

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Sex With The Billionaire

All rights reserved.

This book is protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America. No part of this work may be used, reproduced, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording and faxing, or by any information storage and retrieval system by anyone but the purchaser for their own personal use.

This Book may not be reproduced in any form without the express written permission of Carla Davis, except in the case of a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages for the sake of a review written for inclusions in a magazine, newspaper, or journal—and these cases require written approval from Carla Davis prior to publication. Any reproduction or other unauthorized use of the material or artwork herein is prohibited without the express written permission of the author.

# Chapter One

As I stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around me, I found his bare back directly before me. He was in front of the mirror, lathering his face with shaving cream under what looked like intense concentration.

"Morning," I offered quietly.

He gave me a soft grunt in response and the smallest hint of an unwilling smile.

I hovered by the edge of the shower cubicle, tucking the towel around me and allowing my damp, chestnut hair to cause drops of water to run over my shoulders. "You...um...got a busy day?" I asked.

"Yeah," he responded with a shrug.

Things had been like that between us for a long time; I don't know exactly when the shift happened. I guess it must have been a slow slide into monosyllabic, stiff and awkward conversations. But, I was aware that it had been getting worse. Maybe it was me. Maybe I'd been too occupied, maybe I hadn't shown him enough attention or affection. That thought prompted a question: how long had it been? Two months, three? Yes, it must have been three, because it was the night of his brother's birthday party. Since then, it had been like living with a roommate, rather than a husband.

"Hey," I breathed, stepping forward and smoothing my hand over his back. It felt awkward, wrong somehow, but I forced myself to do it nonetheless. After all, it had always seemed so natural and right. It was a blip, that was all, one of those periods that all couples go through. I had to ride out the discomfort, because, if I didn't, things would surely just get worse.

Silently telling myself that this was the man I loved, I tenderly stroked my way down to the base of his spine before leaning forward and kissing his shoulder. It became instantly apparent that I wasn't the only one who felt a sense of unease.

Carl stiffened and his eyes shifted to watch my reflection in the mirror. "What are you doing?" he asked.

Snaking both arms around his waist, I pressed myself to him and met his pale blue gaze in the mirror. "I know it's been a while," I joked, "but don't tell me you've forgotten how."

"I haven't got time," he said flatly, shaking his head and grabbing his razor from the edge of the sink.

"I'm naked under here," I countered. "You're half naked, it doesn't have to take long." In truth, I'd never been a fan of quick fumbles, but, right then, something seemed infinitely better than nothing. In that moment, I needed to feel wanted, alluring, sexy. I needed to feel a connection with him; something to remind me of the fact we loved each other.

However, he seemed to feel very differently placing both hands on my wrists, he removed my arms from around his waist. "Not right now," he muttered.

"Kids are asleep," I pointed out, persisting despite the hurt of what was obviously a rejection.

"Zara, I'm not having this discussion with you. I've got to get to work." As he determinedly stared at his reflection and swept the razor up his face, he didn't even bother to look at me.

"Do you realize how long it's been since we last made love?" I asked quietly, feeling suddenly very cold in our warm bathroom and tugging the towel more tightly around myself.

Carl exhaled and shook his head, as though he were having one of those unending, circular conversations that our three-year-old was so fond of. "I've been very tired, and very busy," he huffed. "Can we talk about this later?"

"We never talk any more," I muttered. "That's the whole point, we don't talk, we don't have sex. It's like living with a stranger."

Finishing his shave with a few angry strokes of the razor, he tossed the foam covered blade down and turned. Swiping a towel from the rail, he rubbed at his face. "What do you want me to say, huh?" he demanded.

"Well..." I mumbled, feeling as though I were being chastised like a naughty child. "I don't know," I admitted, shrugging. "I just want to know what's happening with us. It didn't use to be like this, but for the past six months or so, it's been..."

"What?" he irritably snapped.

"We've been distant," I sighed.

"And that's my fault?" he blurted.

"I didn't say that," I quickly countered. "It's not your fault, I know I've been busy, too. And I guess, we've both taken our eyes off _us_. But I'm trying to make an effort now," I reasoned.

"What part of 'I haven't got time now' did you not understand?" he muttered, rubbing a hand over his short crop of light brown hair. "I've got to get to work," he added, spinning on his heel and striding into the bedroom.

I followed him until I reached the doorway, where I hovered and leaned against the frame. Silent and dejected, I watched him as he scooped up the shirt he'd left on the bed and thrust his arms into it.

"When we first got married, you always had time," I pointed out solemnly.

Tossing his eyes to the ceiling, he buttoned the shirt before tucking it into his charcoal pants. "What do you expect Zara, that the honeymoon would last forever? Real life gets in the way of all that."

"I'd just hoped..." I mumbled, staring at the carpet just in front of his feet. I was frightened that if I looked up I might start to cry, and I knew he'd think me even more foolish for that. "I hoped that we'd still have that spark."

"Marriage, mortgage and kids are pretty effective in killing the spark," he informed me matter-of-factly. "Nobody ever tell you that?"

"Is that really what you think?" I asked, pushing a strand of damp hair off my cheek and tucking it behind my ear. "You think that the spark is dead?"

"It died a long time ago, Zara," he insisted, fastening the cufflinks on his wrists as he moved to the full-length mirror in the wardrobe door.

I knew he was right. I hadn't been able to admit it, not even to myself. But that feeling I'd always used to get around him had gone. And it wasn't just those tingles of excitement – I wasn't naïve enough to think that it would always exist. But something deeper, something more fundamental, just wasn't there when I looked at him. In fact, as I stood on the threshold between our bathroom and bedroom, staring at him as he brushed invisible creases out of his sleeves, I felt...nothing. I wasn't even angry with him. I couldn't stir up any emotional response to the sight of him, and that frightened me.

"Then, maybe," I offered quietly. "Maybe we need to find out whether it can be revived."

"And how do you suggest we do that?" he asked, giving me a cursory glance over his shoulder.

"Perhaps we should spend some time apart," I mumbled softly. I hadn't made a plan to suggest it. I hadn't even known that thought was in my head until the words came tumbling out of my mouth. And once they were released, hovering in the thick atmosphere that hung between us, I waited expectantly for some reaction from him.

What I got was the same apathy I felt when I looked at him. Carl simply shrugged as he turned back to the bed and whipped his jacket from it. "Maybe," he muttered, nodding.

"Temporary...just a short time," I added, the sudden realization of what I'd proposed striking me with cold, harsh reality. Was I seriously implying that we live apart? We'd started dating over a decade before, we'd lived together for eight of those years, and we'd been married for seven. Life without him was a little difficult to remember, a future without him was almost impossible to envisage. He'd become a part of me. As stale as our relationship had become, the complete lack of our relationship was frightening.

"Yeah," he replied, meeting my eyes squarely for the first time...well, the first time in a long time. "I think you've got a point, Zara. Maybe we do need to find out what we mean to each other. This," he sighed, gesturing between us with a weary movement of his right hand, "isn't doing us any good and it's not good for the boys either."

Our children, five-year-old Ethan and three-year-old Max, had been affected by the frosty atmosphere between their parents, I was sure. By trying to muddle through, and hoping that the problem would go away on its own, Carl and I had been hurting not just ourselves, but them as well. And that, I felt sure, was one area of our lives upon which we were both seeing things the same: Carl and I were both devoted to Ethan and Max.

"Yeah," I softly agreed, nodding gently. "So, a trial separation?" I asked, seeking clarification.

"I think it's probably for the best," he said, slipping his arms into his jacket. "We can talk about it more when I got home."

"And when will that be?" I asked, with something that sounded a lot like bitterness creeping into the edge of my voice. I had a feeling I knew what the answer I'd receive; the same one I got almost every day.

"Late, probably," he predictably replied. "I've got a meeting that I know is gonna run past five, and that will probably be followed by a senior management debriefing."

"Alright," I sighed. "Well, I'll just see you when I see you then."

"Yeah," he sighed, turning to the door and walking briskly through it.

My hair still dripping wet, I stood staring wide-eyed at the wall directly in front of me, the wall that bore a silver framed photograph of Carl and me on our wedding day.

Panic gripping my heart, I wondered if I had done the right thing. This was it, it would either help repair our relationship or it would make one (or both) of us realize it wasn't even worth salvaging. How could those smiling people staring back at me have managed to screw things up so royally?

# Chapter Two

Within just two days of that fateful conversation, I found myself back at my parents' house. Fortunately, they only lived a couple of streets from the home I'd shared with Carl, which meant that we both got to see the children every day. Neither of us wanted to use Ethan and Max as weapons to hurt the other, so when it came to splitting their time between the two houses, conversations were amiable. Anything else, however, was simply not spoken about. We didn't even bother to define the details of our separation.

I'd expected surprise on the part of my parents, assuming that they'd seen only the happy facade of my marriage. I'd thought Carl and I had effectively concealed the less blissful side of our relationships. Apparently, we hadn't.

"Can't say I'm shocked," my mom gently said one evening as we shared a couple of glasses of white wine.

Perched on a stool in front of the kitchen's center island, I peered at her curiously, "What do you mean?"

"Sweetheart," she soothed, settling opposite me and refilling my glass. "Things haven't been right between you two for months. I can tell when you're not happy. So..." she added, exhaling slowly. "You want to tell me what's going on?"

With an unknowing shake of my head, I tried to explain what had been happening over the previous weeks and months. When I finished, she was thoughtfully silent as she sipped on her chardonnay. I had wanted to ask what was on her mind, but, in truth, I was frightened to. I didn't want a second opinion to confirm my foreboding sense that my marriage was over. Carl didn't love me anymore; maybe I didn't love him, either. In any event, what we'd shared had managed to slowly disappear right under our very noses.

"Well, you know," Mom eventually said, "spending time apart from your spouse is never a bad thing. It can make you realize just how much that person means to you."

"I hope so," I whispered.

"Hmm," she pensively nodded. "And in the meantime, maybe you should think about having a little vacation," she added, the seriousness in her brow suddenly replaced with a smile that brightened her whole face.

"A vacation?" I repeated. "I don't know if I'm in the mood. Besides, who would I go with?"

"Go on your own," she insisted, sweeping a smooth hand through the dyed blonde bangs that sat upon her forehead. "Before I had you, I used to vacation alone all the time," she continued.

Eyes widening in surprise, I stared at her. That was something she'd neglected to ever say before.

"Even after your father and I were married, I'd sometimes go off for a week," she gabbled, unaware of my incredulity. "Oh, it's so freeing. Gives you a chance to get in touch with yourself, really think about your life and what matters."

Having never even been on a day trip, much less a vacation alone, the thought was intimidating to say the least. And yet, there was some appeal to it. Perhaps it was the excitably way my mom started to recall her own adventures. Or maybe it was that I realized what she'd said was right: if I really wanted to figure out my own messed up head and heart, I needed some quiet solitude.

"Hey," Mom suddenly blurted, spinning on her stool with something that looked a little like a tipsy sway and grabbing her laptop from the counter behind her. "You ever thought about a cruise?" she asked, opening the computer and tapping feverishly at the keys.

"A cruise?" I echoed.

"Yeah," she nodded, her eyes moving over the screen in front of her. "Oh, the Mediterranean," she enthusiastically gushed. "What do you think?" she asked, swiveling the laptop so I could see the photographs of crystal blue waters and stunning coastline.

"It's nice," I offered with a shrug. "But I can't afford it." That statement was, and was not, technically true. I couldn't afford it, but Carl and I still had a joint account and he certainly could. We were still married, so his money was my money. Nevertheless, I had no intention of splurging on a luxury vacation. And, I figured, the money issue alone would be enough to gently but indefinitely cut my mom's ardor for the subject.

It wasn't.

"Don't be ridiculous, your father and I will pay for it," she swiftly responded.

"No, Mom," I insisted, shaking my head. "I don't want you to do that. You and dad have to think about-"

"If you say the future, I'll come round there and smack you," she grinned. "We're not over the hill yet," she added. "And we can afford this, so let us treat you. God knows, you need a little pampering."

Despite myself, I smiled. However, I was still clinging to my aversion of the matter. "What about the boys, I've never been away from them for more than one night before?"

"Honey, the boys will be fine," she insisted. "When Carl's not with them, they'll be here with us. And, sure, they'll miss you, but it won't scar them to be away from you for a few days. And it'll do you the power of good, you'll come back happier and that's great for everyone."

I didn't share her complete confidence in the suggestion that I would come back happier than when I left, but, I supposed, she'd had a point. "Vacationing alone, though?" I mumbled, that concern still weighing at the back of my mind.

"Trust me," Mom insisted bluntly. "It'll be fine. You're a strong woman, Zara. I think being with Carl all this time has made you forget just how tough you can be on your own."

With a doubtful quirk of my head, I looked at her dark brown eyes, which sparkled care of her fourth glass of wine.

"Besides, it's good to do things that scare you from time to time," she continued. "You're worried you're stuck in a rut? Then don't just complain about it, get the hell out!"

***

Nothing else could really be said in reply to my mother's piece of wisdom. Or to put it another way, she wouldn't let me try to argue with her any more.

So, by the end of that week, I was all packed and saying a tearful 'goodbye' to my boys.

As it happened, neither Ethan nor Max seemed too perturbed by the prospect of not seeing their mom for ten days. That stirred up a bizarre mixture of joy, pride and melancholy. They were growing up much faster than I'd realized and were, apparently, losing the need they once had for me.

Carl had an entirely emotionless reaction to the news of my trip, simply acknowledging that it might do me good. I'd hoped that he may say something about missing me, but no other words came from him.

So, that was it. Mom and Dad hustled me to the airport, and I boarded a plane to Barcelona, where I was scheduled to meet the cruise ship.

Europe wasn't completely new to me; Carl and I had been to Paris and the South of France on our honeymoon. I loved all of the rich culture, the striking architecture, and long history attached to the continent. And Spain was no disappointment. Although I didn't have much time to explore the city before meeting the boat, I did ask the cab driver to take a scenic route, and I got to see glimpses of the Sagrada Basilica , the cathedral and Casa Batllo.

Soaking in the sights, the beautiful sun, and the bustle of the city, I managed to forget, for the time being at least, that I was thousands of miles from home and all alone. I still missed my babies, of course, but I was beginning to understand the excitement and freedom Mom had spoken of. It was liberating!

Fittingly, the cruise ship was called Liberty, and she was a colossal craft, with three main restaurants, a casino, a ballroom, thirteen bars, two full-size pools, a gym, a spa, a nightclub and three decks of luxurious and spacious cabins. My mom had neglected to tell me that she had booked me what was essentially a suite, with a balcony and sitting area to go along with the king sized bed.

Making a mental note to mention her extravagance when I called her, I flopped gratefully onto the bed and found myself smiling at the ceiling. It felt good; not just the bed, although it was just about the most airy mattress I'd ever laid on. What felt really good was being away from all the stress. Out there, in the middle of the Mediterranean, I had nothing to worry about, no responsibilities. At that very moment, I could do whatever I chose. And what I chose to do was take a nap.

# Chapter Three

The next morning, feeling refreshed, I headed down to the main restaurant for breakfast, with a new spring in my step. I have to admit, I felt a little self-conscious eating alone, but quickly I came to ignore the slightly pitying looks older women, with husbands and teenaged children, were giving me. Soon, I was simply enjoying my fruit salad and yogurt, as I admired the stunning view from the windows. Unfortunately, that view was often disrupted by people strolling along the deck. But, what I could see of the coastline of Nice, France, was truly beautiful.

Leaning back in my chair, I chewed on a juicy chunk of mango and couldn't help but wonder what Carl was doing. It was a funny kind of thought: both depressing and gratifying all at once. It felt great to be having a good time without him. Hell, it felt great just to be having a good time. I was reminded that I could not only exist, but _live_ without my husband. And, if the cold, hard truth be known, I didn't miss him. I missed the boys, of course. But I didn't miss Carl. That, in and of itself, was the cause of the more somber sensation. After all, shouldn't I have been missing him?

"Excuse me," a bright voice from behind me uttered.

Twisting in my seat, I turned to find a hunky blonde man, who could have been no more than twenty years' old. He wore a white A-shirt under a Hawaiian floral patterned shirt and blue board shorts. With trendily scruffy dark hair and crystal blue eyes, he grinned at me with a perfect set of blindingly white teeth.

"Hi, there," he said. "Um...this may seem like a strange question," he began, "but have you got any plans for when we dock in Monte Carlo?"

"Err..." I hesitatingly replied.

"I'm Blaine," he stated, seeming to realize he'd neglected to introduce himself. "I couldn't help but notice you're alone," he continued. "And I figured maybe-"

"Oh, well," I interjected hurriedly. "I'm married," I pointed out, lifting my left hand, which still bore both my engagement and wedding rings.

His smile widened as he shook his head. "That's not exactly what I had in mind," he chuckled. "Although, you're a very attractive woman," he added hurriedly. "What I actually wanted to ask was whether you'd be interested in joining a scuba class I'm running."

"Oh," I breathed, my cheeks reddening with embarrassment. How could I have possibly thought he was coming on to me? After all, I was almost ten years his senior. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..." I babbled. "It's not that I think I'm irresistible or anything," I added. "I just...Well, I just assumed. And I don't know why I assumed, I shouldn't have...obviously."

"It's fine," he assured with a good-natured shrug. "You're a woman on your own, a strange man comes up and starts asking you what you're doing at the next port, it's an understandable mistake."

"Hmm," I responded, hoping to detach myself from the whole, hideous conversation as quickly as possible.

"So, anyway," he chuckled. "How about it?"

"Huh?"

"The scuba," he explained. "I give beginners classes, or if you've dived before, we can do something a little more advanced."

"Oh," I nodded. "Well, I've never been diving."

"You wanna?" he excitedly asked. "I promise it's like nothing else you'll do on this trip. And once you've experienced it, you'll be hooked."

"Well...I...." I awkwardly muttered, trying to think of a good excuse why I couldn't go. In truth, I wasn't turned off by the idea of scuba diving as much as I was perturbed about spending any more time around the young stud I'd just made a fool of myself in front of.

Cocking his head to one side, he flashed me what I guessed was the kind of persuasive smile he used on the whole of the female sex. And I could see why. It worked. "Come on," he urged. "It'll be fun, and I'll take good care of you, I promise."

Remembering what my mom had said about adventure and freedom, and realizing that letting a little embarrassment stop me from doing something, was completely contrary to that ethos, I shrugged. "OK," I sighed.

"Great!" he enthused. "Well, we'll be convening on the harbor when we dock and then heading straight down to Port Hercule and the yacht. You don't need to bring anything other than yourself, and a bathing suit," he said with a subtle lift of one eyebrow, so subtle I couldn't be sure I hadn't imagined it. "Oh, and it's probably a good idea not to bring anything that could be lost in the water, you know, jewelry or watches and stuff. Safer to keep it locked up in your cabin," he added.

"Alright," I nodded.

"Good," he replied, mirroring the movement of my head. "I look forward to seeing you this afternoon...." he lingered over the word, lifting the syllable as if it held a question. It was a question that took me a few seconds to comprehend.

"Oh, Zara," I breathed, offering him my hand.

"Look forward to seeing you then, Zara," he said, extending his own fingers toward mine and taking them firmly. As he kept hold of my hand, he leaned forward slightly. "By the way, if you weren't married," he said in a hushed tone, "I totally would."

Jaw dropping open slightly, I was sure I must have misheard, but I didn't get a chance to ask him to repeat it, because by the time my brain had caught up with my tongue, he'd already slipped his hand from mine and was strolling back the way he'd come from.

It would be a complete lie to say there was no part of me that wasn't flattered by the comment. Sure, it had been coarse and without even a hint of romance. But, it had been so long since I'd felt like the object of someone's desire, that even that small crumb of acknowledgment was a balm to my wounded ego. Of course, knowing that he was young and hot, and could probably have his pick of younger women than me, didn't hurt either. Although, I have to admit, it occurred to me that he was the kind of guy who enjoyed getting as much sex as he could; which generally meant not being too picky about who it was with.

Nevertheless, he hadn't said what he said in the hopes of getting anywhere. 'If you weren't married...' those were his words. So, as I finished my fruit and tried to decide if I even knew what scuba diving was, I determined to stop analyzing Blaine's comment to death and accept it as a compliment.

***

The heat in Monte Carlo was sweltering.

Blaine had a small minivan loaded with all his equipment, but when he told the dozen or so of us that there was no air conditioning in it, most of us opted to walk the five hundred and fifty yards to the marina. When we got there, we were directed to a yacht called the 'Banque Populaire'. It wasn't long until we were hustled aboard.

During the short journey out to open water, Blaine went through a detailed safety briefing, explaining how the oxygen tank operated, teaching us several hand signals we might need to communicate while under. He then repeated the warning he'd given me about jewelry, which prompted me to double-check my left hand and earlobes – I'd left what little jewelry I did wear in the cabin's safe. Finally, we were shown how to get into the wet suit. That was an experience all in itself. Even though I chose to wear one of the 'shortie' suits, which stopped at the elbow and the knee, getting into it was still one of the most difficult things I'd ever had to do.

But, as it happened, nobody taking the class was an expert, so we were all laughing together. And Blaine was very attentive in helping – especially the ladies, which was, of course, another clue to the kind of guy he was.

After what felt like an eternity of simply listening to the theory of diving, I was loaded down like a pack mule by the oxygen tank and given a ridiculously tight mask, which, I was informed, was _supposed_ to feel like it was cutting off the circulation to my brain. And then, one by one, we were permitted to climb down the steps and enter the water.

The first thing that struck me about diving was how difficult it was to get used to breathing underwater; something that seemed so alien to my body had to be forced to start with. Slowly, however, I stopped having to concentrate on that aspect of the task, and that's when I really started to appreciate the beauty that could be found in the part of our world that was familiar and exotic all at once.

But, with some thirteen people around me, there wasn't much to view beyond wet-suited legs and arms. In search of a more natural encounter, I swam a little way from the group. Then, I swam a little further and, apparently, further still. When I turned back, expecting to see the class behind me...they weren't there.

Alarmed but not panicking, I gradually broke to the surface, spitting out the mouthpiece and lifting the mask from my eyes. Letting the lapping water lull me along its surface, my gaze darted about me. But there was no sight or sound of anyone. Not a person, and not the yacht we'd sailed on, either.

"What the...?" I mumbled. I couldn't understand it, I felt sure I hadn't managed to stray that far from the others. And I certainly couldn't have gone so far as to no longer see the yacht. Unless...the yacht had gone. Was it possible, they'd all returned to the ship and hadn't noticed I wasn't with them?

Panic beginning to well in my stomach, I turned, still searching for a sign of something I knew damn well I wasn't going to see.

"Oh shit," I murmured beneath my breath. "Shit, shit, shit."

The only thing I could spot that I recognized was the faint outline of the port on the horizon. It would be a long swim back, but it was the only option available to me, so with a deep sigh, I began to move in that direction.

With the tank on my back, swimming was made that much harder and, as my progress became slower, I started to get more and more concerned about being stranded.

However, just as tears of frustration and fear were welling in my eyes, I heard the sharp burst of an air-horn behind me. Treading water, I span around and found a huge white yacht some 100 yards from me.

"Help!" I hollered, lifting one hand and waving frantically. On reflection, this all seemed unnecessary – they'd seen me well enough and were just trying to get my attention.

Never having been so grateful in my life, I forced my tired limbs to stroke closer as the yacht continued to move toward me.

# Chapter Four

I was helped aboard the luxury craft by two men. One was a lanky guy of about thirty, wearing canvas shoes and a pair of long shorts. The other was a little older, broad and tan, with dark hair, a bare chest and red, clinging swim shorts. The more well-built of the two, grabbed the strap of the tank as I climbed the steel ladder, and seemed to hoist me up with it. The skinnier guy, took my hand and urged me up with a concerned look in his eyes.

"Are you OK?" he asked.

"Yes," I spluttered, breathing deeply more from relief than from exertion. "Yes, I'm fine, I think."

"What happened?" the other man probed, easing the heavy tank off my back and dumping it down on the deck.

My legs shaky, I clung to the rail for support. "I don't really know," I admitted. "I was with a scuba group and I must have got separated somehow."

Seeming to realize I wasn't sure on my feet, the darker haired man looped an arm around my waist and steered me toward a set of furniture laid out in the middle of the deck. Coaxing me to a chair, he pushed me gently into it. "You know the name of the boat?" he softly inquired.

"Um..." I mumbled, my addled brain struggling to remember my own name, let alone the yacht's. "Oh, it was...erm...Banque Populaire," I said. "But before that, I was on the cruise ship."

The man before me sank to his haunches and placed his hands rather familiarly on my knees. "We can try and get in touch with the yacht," he stated, peering over his shoulder to the slender man.

With an eager nod, and a, "Sure," he assented. The question not needing to be asked of him, he sprinted off through a set of open glass doors and into what looked like a large living space.

"Are you sure you're alright?" the man asked, peering up at me with a solid, strong jaw and dark eyes. "Do you know how long you were in the water?"

"Not really," I admitted. "But I'm fine," I insisted. "Just glad you came along when you did."

"Well, it's no problem," he grinned. "Let's get you out of that suit," he suggested. "I'll go and get you a towel."

Taking slow, deep breaths, I tried to compose myself while he was gone. I felt as though all the blood had drained from my face, and I wasn't entirely sure what had caused it. Yes, I'd been rattled by the fear of being alone in open water. But I realized the man who had rescued me was also rattling me.

It didn't take more than two minutes for him to return with a massive, fluffy bath towel. "Here," he offered, shaking the folds out and wrapping the warm towel around my shoulders.

"Thank you," I replied, noting as I gripped the terry edges that I was shaking even more than I had been while I was in the water. Just shock, I tried to tell myself. Nothing more.

The mysterious man opened his mouth to speak again, but as he inhaled his friend appeared at the doors.

"Skipper got hold of the Banque Populaire," the tall man announced. "The scuba group has gone back to the Liberty."

"Liberty?" the man in red shorts replied.

"The cruise ship," I explained.

"Yeah," the other guy nodded. "Anyway, we contacted the Liberty and she's just pushed off. They won't be docking again until Bastia."

"They know they've left one of their passengers behind?" the other guy bluntly and rhetorically asked.

"Skipper told him," came the reply. "They can't come back, so the young lady will have to catch up with them."

"That's OK," I wearily sighed. "I'll figure something out."

"No, no," the dark-haired man replied. "You don't have to figure anything out. I'll see that you get to Bastia."

"Is that where you're heading?" I asked, surprised by the coincidence.

"No," he replied, grinning. "But that doesn't matter, I'm not going to leave you to find your own way."

Shaking my head, I unwound myself from the towel and got to my feet. "I really couldn't impose on you like that," I stated. "You've done more than enough, thank you. If you could just drop me at Port Hercule, that will be fine."

"Really," the man replied, placing his large smooth hands on my bare forearms, "I insist. You're no imposition, I promise."

"But...I mean..." I stammered. "I've got no clothes, and no money to get anything."

"That's no problem either," he countered, unwilling it seemed to be dissuaded. "We'll make port, and can pick you up a few things in Monte Carlo and then head off to meet the Liberty at Bastia when they dock in...?" As he hovered over the sentence, he twisted his face toward his friend.

"Not for two days, apparently," came the reply, "I guess, they're sailing along the Italian coastline before coming back on themselves."

"I really can't ask you to do that," I replied. "I can just..." my words stumbled to a halt when I realized I had nothing else to say. I could just...what? I couldn't get a hotel, I had no money for clothes, or a taxi much less a plane ticket.

"Come with me," the man said with a gently insistent smile as he draped an arm around my shoulders.

Blithering attempts to argue with him were ignored as he led me into the yacht's stunning main deck. The living area was incredibly spacious with a grand piano in the corner and leather couches on both sides. We passed through swiftly before taking a small set of steps to the upper deck.

His arm still around me, he led me down a corridor and paused when he reached the third door on the left. Pushing it open, he revealed a bedroom that was almost as large as the one I'd left on the Liberty. It wasn't quite a suite, but it was still nicer than any hotel room I'd ever been in.

"You're welcome to stay here," he offered.

"Oh, no, really," I mumbled. "I couldn't."

"You know what," he chuckled. "I think I know why this seems so awkward."

"You do?" I wondered peering at him curiously, the Mediterranean still causing my hair to cling to my forehead. It hadn't occurred to me until then to be concerned with what I looked like, but when I imagined the sight of myself, I couldn't stop thinking what a mess I must have been.

"Yeah," he replied, oblivious to the self-critical thoughts roaming through my mind. "I'm sorry," he sighed. "I'm Gethin Pavetti," he added, offering me his right hand.

"Gethin?" I echoed.

"My Mom's Welsh," he responded with a shrug.

"Pavetti?" I murmured in the same tone. "As in...Pavetti?" I continued. The Pavetti family were huge in real estate; owned complexes all over New York and California and were well known for buying and selling luxury homes for people of similar wealth and means to themselves.

"And you are?" he chuckled.

"I'm sorry," I blurted, quickly taking his hand. "Zara," I told him. "Zara Kane."

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Zara," he said. "Now, we know each other, it's less awkward, right?" he added, with a boyish grin.

There was something about that smile that bothered me; something about it that prompted a feeling in the pit of my stomach that should have been a red flag. "A little," I lied weakly. In truth, it was no less awkward. In fact, it might have been _more_ awkward now I knew I was on the yacht of a multi-billionaire, looking as if I'd just been spat out by the sea.

"Why don't you take a warm shower?" he suggested. "I'll send out for a selection of clothes, and whatever you like is yours."

"You can't-" I began to object, but he was hearing none of it.

"It's already a done deal, Zara. Besides, I'm not in the habit of abandoning women in need of help."

With that he nudged me into the bedroom and closed the door behind him. A brief flash of concern rocked through me: was I being kidnapped? But, even though I didn't know him from Adam, I couldn't bring myself to imagine Gethin as the threatening type without laughing. There was something about him that seemed so...well, nice and normal. If I'd met him in any other circumstances, I would not have imagined him to be the owner of yachts and jets and mansions all over the country.

***

He had meant what he said. He'd ordered almost an entire wardrobe of clothes, and any argument I gave that suggested I didn't need so much just for two days was quickly dismissed. That night, we shared a dinner, during which we talked about all kinds of things...expect anything personal. It wasn't a conscious decision on my part to steer from those areas, but I was glad it worked out that way.

By the time the following morning rolled around, I was amazed at just how comfortable I felt in his company. It was as if I had known him forever. His younger friend, who I eventually found out was named Tom, headed back to his own place in Monte Carlo the night they'd pulled me from the water, which left me completely alone with Gethin. Well, alright, alone with him and his small crew of ten.

My days were spent lounging on his sun deck, trying to disguise my interest in his diving technique and my even greater interest when he climbed back on board with swimming shorts that clung to his generous form. I was well aware that I shouldn't have been looking, but I couldn't tear my eyes away – he was impressive to say the least.

We fell into friendly banter; a relaxed easiness on the surface which had, for me at least, a frisson of something else bubbling beneath the surface. And when the two days had passed frustratingly quickly, and we were spending our last evening together, I found myself ridiculously melancholy. Although I wouldn't have been able to admit it at that time, I was going to miss Gethin. I was going to miss him much more than I missed Carl.

Over a casual dinner in the main living space, Gethin seemed equally quiet and introverted. When he did speak, it wasn't with the usual cheerfulness that I'd become accustomed to. Instead, he began opening up about himself: he told me that he'd been married, and was recently divorced.

"To be honest," he said, "I'm a bit of a screw-up all round."

Not recognizing the self-critical man before me as the one I thought I'd come to know, I shook my head. "I'm sure that's not true."

"Well, I made a mess of my marriage," he sighed. "And my dad was the successful one where business is concerned. I don't run anything, I just let it all run itself. But there is one thing I got right," he added, smiling as he stood up from the couch and moved to the large glass doors. Thoughtfully, he gazed out into the dark. "My daughter," he breathed. "She's probably the best thing that ever happened to me."

Unable to prevent myself from smiling at the affectionate way he spoke about his girl, I got up and wandered to the window. "Nothing quite like being a parent, huh?" I softly uttered, settling by his side our arms brushing against each other.

"You got kids?" he asked, with a soft smile.

"Two boys," I replied, nodding as I found myself running the palm of one hand reassuringly over his broad shoulder blades. It seemed natural, we'd been unconcerned with personal boundaries ever since he pulled me onto the boat.

I realized that was the point in the conversation at which I should have said, 'And, by the way, I'm married. Separated, but still married.' However, I avoided it. I can't say exactly why. I guess, it wasn't something I was ready to discuss. But I should have done. I should have been as open with him as he had been with me.

"You know," he said, turning to face me. "I've really enjoyed these last few days."

"Me too," I responded without hesitation.

"I'm glad you agreed to let me bring you to Bastia," he continued, his right hand lifting to my cheek and the backs of his fingers brushing almost imperceptible across my skin.

My heart skipping a beat, I tried to smile at him. "I'm glad you offered," I whispered. "Thank you."

"No," he responded, shaking his head. "Thank you." His eyes were focused intently on mine, almost oppressively. I was held captive by them. And then, his face began to move. It was a slow glide forward, I had plenty of time to pull away if I'd wanted to.

But I didn't want to.

My eyelids fluttered closed as his sweet lips gently met mine, and my entire being called silently for him.

# Chapter Five

The kiss ignited something; something I hadn't experienced in months, maybe even years. It was passion. Pure, untamed, unabashed passion. My body wasn't simply reacting out of duty or what I perceived to be expected of me. No, in those intense, electrifying moments, my entire form was aflame with a hot, pulsing desire.

As his tongue slipped smoothly between my parted lips, bringing the faint taste of cream and chocolate laced with Tia Maria, I felt as though all the strength left my body. Leaning into him, and appreciating for the first time just how solid and muscular his chest was, I moaned joyfully.

The sound, slight as it was, must have called to him like siren, because his tongue suddenly started to move more ardently over mine, swirling around it and coaxing it into a sensual, playful dance.

Grasping the front of his shirt with both fists, I pulled him closer, even though there was no 'closer'. Our bodies were flush; my tender, craving mound was rubbing against the top of his thigh while a subtle swell in his pants began to make itself known against my lower abdomen.

Liquid heat flushed through my entire body, scorching my cheeks and sparking a sudden, desperate longing between my legs.

Gethin's hands slowly slid down, skimming over my shoulders before caressing the curves of my waist and settling at my hips. As if sensing the growing restlessness at my core, he tugged me to him, his thigh slipping seamlessly between mine.

"God," I gasped, tearing my lips from his as I began to tremble.

While his bright, vibrant eyes darkened in a way that should have indicated danger, he smiled softly. "You're beautiful, Zara. Do you realize that?"

"I...I..." I muttered, my brain refusing to cooperate with my mouth.

"I've wanted you from the moment I saw you," he added, his voice seeming to drop an octave as it took on a sexy, gravelly quality. "I've been dreaming about you; I've been imagining what it would feel like to hold you; what your skin would taste like..." His lips curving in a broader grin, he slowly dipped his head forward and gently kissed my neck.

Inhaling shakily, I breathed in the heady scent of his minty shampoo mingled with a sharp, masculine sandalwood. My hands moved of their own volition, sweeping up into his thick, dark hair and massaging the back of his head and neck.

His lips, meanwhile, were trailing a teasing path from the base of my throat up to my ear, nibbling lightly and occasionally licking until he reached my lobe and sucked it into his warm mouth.

Fisting his hair, I urged him on as I found my body began to writhe unbidden against him. "Oh, Geth," I panted. "I've been dreaming about you, too."

The impressive, and very warm, swell in his pants was prodding me, impatiently. Yet, his hands and mouth continued to caress me lazily, as though we had all the time in the world. And, in some ways, I was content to let whatever it was that was happening between us drag on and on forever. But there was a hunger that besieged me; a craving that demanded immediate gratification; an emptiness that needed to be filled. Waiting wasn't an option.

"You smell so good," he mumbled, his mouth relinquishing its claim on my ear as he pressed his cheek to mine and slowly inhaled.

The sound of his voice, deep and rumbling, was fueling the fire that raged in me. It rumbled in his chest and vibrated through me, causing me to feel as though I would melt into the floor. But much more than the physical effect of that sound, his words were stimulating the most erotically sensitive part of my entire body: my mind. To feel desirable and attractive, after months of being invisible to my own husband.

"God, Zara," he groaned, his fingers moving skillfully downward until he reached the hem of my dress. "I've gotta have you," he whispered with animalistic need.

"Yes," I whimpered, waiting anxiously for him to pull the fabric up my thighs.

However, he didn't yank my clothing. Instead, his index fingers carefully crept just the barest inch under the dress and began stroking the soft flesh of my outer thigh. My breath catching in the back of my throat as I tried to fill my lungs, I left one hand grasping his hair while the other slipped down to his shoulder and twisted the cotton of his shirt.

Gethin tipped his head back, smiling as he peered at my no doubt, sluttishly reddened cheeks and parted lips.

"Please don't stop," I panted, realizing perhaps that it was far too late to play the meek or reluctant virginal-type. Or maybe I didn't even want to. It didn't really matter what he thought of me, after all. After that night, I'd never see him again – what the hell if he remembered me as the 'easy lay' he'd picked up the in the middle of the Mediterranean...literally.

"I'm not going to," he reassured, his grin broadening while his hands continued to tease me.

Unable and unwilling to wait for his touch to move higher, both of my hands shot down to his larger ones. Pausing only momentarily, to admire the smoothness of his skin, I forced his palms higher. "Please, Gethin," I mewled. "I need you."

"I'm here," he soothed calmly. He'd allowed his hands to be moved by mine, but he didn't take over as I hoped he would. There was still no rampant pawing at my underwear. Instead, his hot palms lingered at my thighs, while the pads of his fingers brushed the lacy material that circled the tops of my legs.

As if a spring were being tightened, I felt the tension in my belly increase. The clawing of my vacant and wanting core intensified, and I groaned as my hips involuntary bucked causing my sensitive bud to brush against the heat of his bulky thigh.

"You're so sexy," he whispered, his face dropping to my shoulder and his lips beginning to offer featherlight kisses along the line of my collarbone.

Head feeling extremely heavy, I let it flop back and released a breath toward the slatted ceiling. "Jesus," I hissed, my hands leaving his and sweeping up to the waistband of his pants. I had never felt so aroused in my entire life; it was as if I would explode if I didn't find some release. The subtle glances and harmless flirting of the days before had already been a form of foreplay. The moment he started touching me, I was ready to scream with desire that was almost painful.

As I grappled gracelessly with the clasp of his belt, my left hand smoothed over the crotch of his pants, rubbing the hot, rigid rod that fought to break free of its confines. With a suddenly very dry mouth, I realized just how impressively he was endowed. The outline in his swim shorts, although eye-widening, hadn't done him justice. "Oh, God," I mumbled, as another flush of arousal pooled in my core and dampened my panties further.

"Hmm," he groaned, his hips undulating gently. "Zara," he whispered, lifting his head fractionally. "If you keep that up, I'm not going to be responsible for my actions." It was said with a tint of amusement, yet there was a serious undertone.

"Sounds promising," I hoarsely replied.

Lips quirking in a half smile, he allowed one lazy hand to curve around to my inner thigh and gradually glide upward. The entire time, he kept his eyes firmly on mine, as if daring me to break contact. When his fingers slowly pressed against the crotch of my underwear, I finally blinked.

"You're so warm," he noted softly, a twinkle in his dazzling, chocolaty eyes.

Eyelids flickering as I tried to keep them open, my hands paused: one still cupping his gargantuan bulge and the other gripping the lose end of his black, leather belt. Moving entirely of its own will, my body bucked and I trust myself more firmly against him.

Through my drenched underwear, his fingers brushed my swollen lips, moving expertly, as though he already knew my body intimately. Without any fumbling, he found the engorged center of my pleasure and rolled the pad of his middle finger over it.

"Ahh," I panted, beginning to shake violently.

"God, Zara, I wanna be inside you," he murmured. "I want to feel your warmth around me."

"Yes," I whimpered, tears of anticipation welling in my lower lids. "Yes," I repeated, clenching the fingers of my left hand and squeezing his manhood with gentle vehemence.

I strained groan emerged from deep within him, and then it was as if a switch had been flicked. His mouth crashed down onto mine, tongue demanding an entrance I was only too willing to offer. His hands, meanwhile, snatched out from beneath my dress and snaked around me. Adroitly, he tugged the zipper down and began peeling the fabric from me.

With quiet murmurs of pleasure, I gripped the shirt at his abdomen and began yanking it free from his pants. As soon as I had access to bare flesh, I allowed my fingers to wander luxuriously over the ridges of his muscular stomach.

My dress puddling at my waist, Gethin smoothly cupped each of my breasts in his large hands, the thumbs stroking appreciatively over the tightly erect nipples. I continued to whimper and moan against his mouth, while his tongue moved erotically within the confines of mine. And, with a wriggle, I forced the dress off my hips.

Coming up for air, he gasped as he wrenched his lips from mine. "You're perfect," he softly uttered, his hands still moving gently over my breasts as his eyes joined in the appreciation of them. However, suddenly, he was moving again, arms sliding around me before lifting me easily.

Automatically, I wrapped my legs around his waist, kicking off the flat sandals I wore. My hands clung to his shoulders while my naked torso rubbed against the soft fabric of his shirt.

With a force that knocked the air out of my lungs, he pushed me back against the glass doors.

Moving in sync, my face tilted down, while his tipped upward and once again our tongues engaged in a frenzied battle. Pinned between the door and him, I clawed at the only parts of his shirt I could reach, as if trying to rip it from him. I'm not sure if that's what I actually had in mind or if my hands were growing as restless as the rest of me.

But with another flurry of strong, masculine power, he turned. His arms keeping me captive, he took smooth purposeful strides. I was vaguely aware that the cool glass was no longer at my back and that we were moving, but my brain was far too busy on other things to focus on the whys and where's.

It was only when I was sharply deposited on the leather couch and his weight was suddenly bearing down on me, that I realized where we'd gone. But, by that point, his erection was pushing libidinous against my inner thigh.

Gethin lifted his upper body from me, leaving my lips bereft as he made short work of his shirt. He didn't bother to unbutton it; he just whipped it hurriedly over his head. Once it was tossed aside, he grabbed the lace panties at my hips and tugged them from me in one swift and easy move.

At that point, while I lay there completely exposed to him, the reality of what I was about to do struck me. I was about to have sex with someone who was still, essentially, a stranger. I was about to sleep with someone other than my husband; I was about to be unfaithful. But we were separated, right? I wasn't doing anything wrong. Who was I kiddin'? Even if it was wrong, I knew I would still go right ahead and do it. I couldn't call a stop to it. I didn't want to even try.

Pushing his pants and his underwear off his hips, Gethin's broad, imposing manhood sprung free. It was beautifully smooth and solid with the slightest upward curve. Like the rest of him, it was sleek, strong and exuding an overwhelming masculinity. Keeping his eyes solidly on my face, he carefully took his member in one hand and leaned back down until the soft pink glans was nestled against my entrance.

I took my bottom lip between my teeth, and held my breath as I waited for him to enter me. For a long moment, we were both still and silent, the only sound I could hear was my heart pounding in my chest and the blood rushing in my ears.

"You're beautiful," he eventually breathed, as his hips began a slow, but persistent drive forward.

I winced as his girth stretched me way beyond what I was used to with Carl, but my body was ready enough that it wasn't painful. Instead, the muscles fluttered and my sex swelled, drawing him deeper.

"Ahh," I cried out as he settled, his hard rod buried completely within my soft core.

"You feel good," Gethin whispered, his mouth hovering above me. Just a breath away, his lips brushed mine with their teasing sweetness. "You alright?" he asked quietly.

"Yes!" I screeched, my body alive with currents of electricity coursing through me. I shuddered and bucked beneath him, reveling in the sensation of completion. But it wasn't enough. I need to feel him moving within me. "Oh, Geth," I breathlessly uttered. "Please!"

Knowing what my inarticulate plea was for, he complied, gradually sliding from me only to surge back once more. I arched to meet him this time, releasing a strangled cry of pleasure as our bodies met and merged again. And then, he lost that cool, calm control.

Raw, animal lust overtook him and he began thrusting powerfully. Deeper and deeper, he plunged into me, ruthless and demanding. He seemed to know not only that my body could take it, but also that it was exactly what I wanted. Untamed passion. Unrefined, primal pleasure. The base act of wild, uncontrolled sex. In other words, the things that had been missing from my own life for so very long.

Again and again, our bodies slapped roughly together. My breathy cries, mingling with his red-blooded groans, rose up along with the smell of sweat and a lascivious musk. My fingers moved over his smooth, clammy back, the fingernails raking over his shoulders and spurring him on.

With each drive, he edged me a little closer, until I was on the very precipice of mind-numbing ecstasy. Sucking in a deep breath, I held it as the world narrowed and every muscle in my body tensed. And then, suddenly, lightning bolts crackled in my brain; spots danced in front of my darkened lids and my entire form convulsed like a fish that had been hauled onto the deck of a ship.

In the midst of my rapture, I heard the sound of Gethin's voice, which seemed very far away. "Zara," he groaned, the muscles in his shoulders tensing as he gave into his own release.

"Ah," I sobbed, my eyes beginning to lazily open as I felt his warmth pulse into me in strong, intense bursts.

"Oh, Zara," he huffed, pulling in deep breaths that caused his chest to writhe deliciously against mine. "Ugh, that was..." he mumbled. "That was incredible."

"Hmm," I hummed in agreement, a contented smile etched on my face.

"I don't want you to leave tomorrow," he abruptly announced, his features stiffened and serious as he lifted his head and stared intently down at me.

Still unable to wipe the dopey smirk from my lips, I gazed obliviously into eyes that I would quite happily have drowned in. "What?" I chuckled.

"I don't want you to leave," he repeated, his strong jaw unrelentingly tense. "Stay with me."

I wasn't sure whether it was a request or a demand; there had been an absolutism to his words, but a slightly plaintive edge to the voice that had spoken them. And while I tried to wrap my orgasm-muddled head around that, I also grappled with the broader implications of what he was suggesting. "You..." I mumbled, the corners of my smirking mouth faltering only slightly. "You want me to stay on the yacht with you?"

"Yes," he replied firmly.

"Well, that's...that's crazy," I sighed, giggling.

"No it's not," he insisted solemnly. "I don't want you to go, Zara." Lifting his hand to my face, he brushed a strand of hair from my cheek. "Stay here with me," he whispered, this time with obvious entreaty in both his tone and his ardent eyes.

"Well..." I mumbled. "I don't suppose I'm really in a position to say 'no'," I chuckled.

His features instantly brightening, he slowly brought his face back to mine. "You won't regret it," he promised softly, before our lips merged and words became entirely unnecessary.

### To be continued....

### Thank you for reading!

Please visit your favorite eBook retailer to view the next books in this series.
Loving The White Billionaire

by

Monica Brooks
Copyright © 2014 by Monica Brooks

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Loving The White Billionaire

All rights reserved.

This book is protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America. No part of this work may be used, reproduced, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording and faxing, or by any information storage and retrieval system by anyone but the purchaser for their own personal use.

This book may not be reproduced in any form without the express written permission of Monica Brooks, except in the case of a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages for the sake of a review written for inclusions in a magazine, newspaper, or journal—and these cases require written approval from Monica Brooks prior to publication. Any reproduction or other unauthorized use of the material or artwork herein is prohibited without the express written permission of the author.

# Chapter One

"Remember the first time we came here?"

"I do," I said as I looked around at the dark field. There was a large oak tree off in the distance, I could just make it out among the large man-made lake that some of its branches shadowed.

"Remember our first kiss?"

"Yes, of course Ethan! What is this about?" I asked impatiently.

Today was just a normal ordinary day. I got up, got dressed in my usual attire as an accountant, and later came back to my apartment.

I hadn't planned anything besides heating up the leftovers that I had from last night, having a long conversation with my boyfriend via Skype, and eventually turning in for the night after a relaxing bubble bath.

So when I got a knock on my door at a quarter to seven, I was definitely not expecting Ethan to be standing there with roses in hand, and an invite to walk down memory lane.

"Be patient my love, just wait," He assured as we continued to walk towards the tree.

"Okay, I'll be patient."

"Good. Remember what I told you that first day under the Oak tree, you know, the night of our first date?" he asked as his arm wrapped snugly around my waist.

"Like it was yesterday," I said closing my eyes momentarily as my mind went back to those words.

"I love you like I've never loved anyone before," he whispered softly in my ear in the present just as he had in the past.

"I can't believe that I found you at such a young age," I said truthfully as we were now standing under the branches.

"Me neither, baby," he said through that beautiful smile that I'd grown to love.

We stood there, just gazing into each other's eyes as the water from the lake lapped at the man-made shore. The grass was plush like carpet under the soles of our feet, and the soft breeze helped in the creation of goose bumps rising on my long brown arms. He reached his dark chocolate hand up to run it through my loose black curls as they tickled my shoulder blades.

His full lips held a smile that lit up his deep brown eyes. His chiseled jaw was lightly dusted with facial hair; something that he knew heightened his sex appeal.

"I could get lost in those honey brown eyes." he told me before leaning in to gently kiss my forehead.

My eyes shut tight at the warmth of his kiss, and my heart continued to pound deep in my chest. God I loved this man so much. He was my everything, my world, my...

"Ethan?" I asked abruptly as he loosened his fingers from my locks and began to kneel. I was taken by surprise, so much so, that I couldn't believe what was going on around me.

As if on cue, a thousand little lights began to make their presence known among the branches of the tree, and after getting a closer look, I could see that they were soft white Christmas lights.

When I looked back down to Ethan, I gasped. In his hand, was a little black box that he opened to reveal a small but stunning diamond ring.

"Marry me, Jaida, so that we can add this memory to our very own special place."

"Ethan..." I said through the tears that were welling up behind my eyes.

"Jaida...Jaida! Ms. Jaida!"

I hadn't realized that I'd drifted off into la-la land when my boss walked in through the door. I immediately straightened my posture and organized my desk in the appropriate manner as she walked further into my office.

Folding my hands neatly in front of me, I looked up and into the eyes of Mrs. Gallagher. She was a tall woman with hair the color of the warm sunset. Her eyes were as vivid blue as the sapphire necklace that I never saw her without.

She was a thick woman, and dressed herself to accentuate her curves in the most professional way. I smiled as she pulled out a chair in front of my desk to sit, and waited patiently as she sifted through a crisp manila folder. She was making me extremely nervous.

First she catches me daydreaming, next she's firing me a week and three days before my wedding. I really needed to get a grip, I swear Ethan's pre-wedding jitters are contagious; he'd been pretty jumpy lately. But most men were right before the wedding; it's what I expected.

"Daydreaming again Ms. Jaida?" Mrs. Gallagher asked interrupting my thoughts yet again.

"I'm so sorry, I just have a lot on my mind lately; I'm ok, anyway, did you need something?" I asked as I forced myself to relax a little.

"You can relax all the way now, I'm not in here to fire you," she reassured, laughing slightly as she saw my noticeable change in posture.

"Oh, thank goodness," I breathed.

"Am I really that much of a hard ass?" Mrs. Gallagher asked she finally found the paper she had been rifling through that folder for.

"Of course not! No, I just-I'm so distracted and I really did not want that to reflect on my work here at the firm..."

Mrs. Gallagher dismissed my worries with a wave of her hand.

"Relax; I know how stressful planning a wedding around work can be. That is exactly why I am giving you this to sign and date," she said handing the sheet to me.

I noticed immediately that it was my pay stub. I was a little confused; I didn't get paid until Tuesday, though it was Monday, it was still unexpected. I began to fold it and put it away in my desk like I normally did, when I heard Mrs. Gallagher pointedly clear her throat.

When I looked up at her, I noticed an almost complacent grin on her small red lips. Looking back down at my pay stub, I noticed that my vacation time that I had put in for had been approved. Not only that, but an extra week had been added on, fully paid, and starting...

"This week? But it's only nine in the morning and I have so much to do today..."

"I'll see you in two weeks Ms. Peterson," Mrs. Gallagher said as she stood up and extended her hand.

"Thank you so much, I really appreciate this," I said as I took her hand in a friendly shake.

"You deserve it," she said with a nod, and with that, she was out of the room. Cleaning up my desk and shutting down my computer didn't take long. With a glance at my surroundings to make sure that I hadn't left anything behind, I turned around and made my way to open, and then lock my office door behind me.

My evening went normal as per usual, save for the fact that my fiancé didn't last for too long on Skype. I tried to see him earlier today with lunch in hand, but he was too busy with a patient. It didn't bothered me too much; he was very busy with his new medical career. At thirty-two, Ethan had graduated from medical school, and started working immediately after.

He'd already been offered a job at one of the best hospitals in the state of California; and was making a good living. I, on the other hand, hadn't gotten the ball rolling as well. I barely made it through school, and finding a job was tough. Luckily for me, I happened to know one of the women who worked in the firm I currently work for. She put in a good word for me with Mrs. Gallagher.

Ethan didn't live too far from here, but he did live far enough away from me to spend at least one hour in traffic to get to me. And even though that is a lot of time spent back and forth in a car, it's my preference. I'm old-fashioned in that sense. Though I'm not a virgin, I did want some things traditional.

The moment we get back from our honeymoon, I will be moving out of my little nest to live in his palace. Looking around at the plush beige furniture, the vivid yellows and purples of my flowers and the modernized style of my apartment, I began to feel a pang of sadness. This place was all my own, and in a matter of a little under a month, I would no longer call this place my home.

I took a deep breath and sank deeper into the comfort of my couch. The sound of the alarm going off on my phone gave my heart false hope when I noticed that it wasn't a call from my Ethan. I wondered what he was up to; he seemed like he had a lot of things to do. I hoped that it wasn't going to keep him up too late.

There was no use worrying myself over it too much. Taking a deep breath as I soaked in a few extra seconds on the couch, I reached over and switched off the light before proceeding down the hall to bed.

***

It had been such a long time since I'd woken up on my own free will. Typically the alarm clock would have woken me up with its violent screaming by now. The malleable plush of the memory foam, that formed to make my queen sized bed, hugged my curves oh so well as I stretched my muscles to relieve the ache of a long night's sleep. A moan escaped my throat as I rolled over on my stomach; my hair forming like a cumulus cloud around my head.

The light from late morning barely made its way around my thick bamboo blinds. My head still against my pillow, I reached beneath it to find my phone. I knew that it was bad for the battery, but I'd kept it close to me all night, just in case Ethan called. My eyes hadn't fully adjusted to the light, making it hard not to shield my eyes from the bright light of my screen.

"Ethan called me last night?" I said aloud as I immediately called him back.

The phone rung for a few seconds before I heard his voice. Unfortunately, it was the sound of his voicemail. Pulling my phone away from my ear, I checked the time and noticed that it was nine.

Ethan should be at work; better not bother him with one thousand calls, texts, and voice messages. I felt so desperate, but it was because I was missing my fiancé. I figured that maybe I should go back to sleep and wait for Ethan to call me back, but before I could get comfortable, I heard a knock at my door. I checked the time again in confusion...I wasn't expecting anyone?

Was it one of my brothers? I thought as I walked down the hallway, smoothing my hair out as I neared the door. Looking down at myself to make sure that everything was in place, I lifted my gaze to the door before opening it.

"Ethan!" I said forgetting my composure as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Good morning, baby," he responded with a swift kiss to my forehead. He seemed a little tense.

"How are you? I missed you so much," I said giving him a tight squeeze before backing away to study him. He seemed different, as if something had changed.

"Go get some clothes on, let me take you to breakfast."

"Are you sure? Don't you have to work?" I asked.

We were now standing in my living room an arms length away from each other.

"Aww, are we going somewhere special?" I asked as I set out on my task.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out, babe, so go get ready," he said with a wink before I turned around and walked to he bedroom with a skip in my step.

# Chapter Two

I love how Ethan spoils me. Though he's been distant lately, I realize now that it's purely just the wedding jitters. During our drive I brought up the arrangements for the wedding a couple of times, and he seemed sort of jumpy, so I let it go while we were still in the car. When we finally stopped, it was at our favorite restaurant, the one we used to frequent while he was in school.

Everyone there knew us by name, what they didn't know is that we were recently engaged. When the owners caught wind, they immediately offered to pay for our dinners, and a complimentary bottle of champagne.

I noticed how Ethan looked at me when I told them of our news. He seemed shocked, almost as if it were a secret. I noticed that he was also a little more subdued during the meal. He didn't seem like he was as hungry as he should be, being that he had a juicy sirloin steaming in front of him.

When it was time to leave, the owners congratulated us once again before we headed off into the night.

"I can't wait for us to be married," I said reaching over to cup the back of his neck in a warm embrace. He tensed just a little before relaxing and giving me a small smile.

"Yeah," he said looking back to the road and giving a nod.

"What's wrong?" I asked, noticing his change in demeanor.

"Nothing baby, nothing, let's just...talk about something else," He said reaching over and forcing a smile as he patted my thigh. I nodded my head in compliance before looking ahead of me.

These pre-wedding jitters were really getting the best of him.

***

It was now three days before the biggest day of my life. We'd had our rehearsal just a few hours ago, and now we were on our way to the rehearsal dinner. Though the ride was short, we still didn't say much to each other. Boy I've never seen him this tense; not even for his medical exams. I decided to let it go whenever he would get tense like this, especially after that first time he asked me to talk about something else.

I figured that he needed time to deal with this on his own. As we arrived at our destination, Ethan opened the car door for me and held my hand in his as we made it through the doors of my Uncle's restaurant. It was a small place, but it was decorated beautifully. He'd reserved the place entirely for us, and as we sat down at our designated table, our family began to come in.

I looked to my right at Ethan; I couldn't quite describe the look on his face. I could describe how much I didn't like it though. It made me feel uneasy. I reached over to squeeze his leg; he didn't look over at me, though he did smile.

I smiled as well, and even though I wanted more, I decided to let the evening happen. As my family began to fill their seats, and the champagne was poured, I relaxed after a small flute. The champagne was very sweet; just the way I loved it. The vibe overall was great, and the toasts that were made brought tears to my eyes.

I looked over at Ethan; my eyes were brimming with tears to see that he was already looking at me. He was smiling, warmly for the first time in days. I could see and feel the love in his eyes as he stared straight through mine and into my soul. I knew he could see his mate in me. Our emotions were mirrored so perfectly, it was like a fairytale.

# Chapter Three

I realized in an instant that something was wrong. I was in my car when my phone rang. I noticed that it was Ethan and instantly my heart started thrumming in my chest. It was the day before our wedding and I was supposed to be on my way to my best friend's house for my bachelorette party. But Ethan seemed urgent; he couldn't tell me over the phone and had asked to meet in person.

"Just meet me by our tree!" he'd said when I tried to ask him for further information.

"Okay, Ethan...I'll be there," I had said before he hung up the conversation. As I drove on towards our favorite little spot, my mind kept racing. I could not for the life of me keep my thoughts quiet, nor could I keep them positive.

I wanted to think romantically; here Ethan was on the night of his bachelor party and he wanted to see me. But on the other hand I couldn't. He seemed so anxious, so...frustrated with me, and I hadn't even done anything.

Nearing the corner, I slowed down just before the road ended and the gravel path started. Parking my car off to the side, I carefully got out, and proceeded down the half-lit trail. Making my way further towards my destination, I took off my heels and let my bare feet touch the dew-soaked grass.

I could barely make out a tall, dark figure in the distance, but I knew that it was Ethan. As I came closer, he noticed me, but didn't come towards me. The only light that guided my path now, was from the full moon. Though there were no other lights, I could still see pretty clearly. I could see clearly enough to notice that Ethan was troubled. I stopped a few paces in front of him.

He hadn't looked up at me since I neared him. I knew him too well to think positively at this moment. There was something wrong, something terribly wrong. The wrinkles he was creating in his forehead were so prominent that I felt they were permanent. As I looked closer, I couldn't believe my eyes. His face was tired, over tired, like he hadn't gotten any sleep. I noticed the bags that I had never seen before had moved in under his eyes.

"You've been stewing over whatever this is for a long time," I stated simply.

"I don't know how to tell you this. Jaida...I still love you..." he said, though he still hadn't looked at me.

"Ethan, look at me..."

"Jaida! Just let me think!" he said cutting me off.

Though they were only words, they cut like a knife. It wasn't the words that hurt, it was the inflection. The tone that he threw at me. The volume of his voice.

"I've been thinking about this for about two weeks now...Jaida...I don't want to marry you."

"What..." my voice broke off, and came out as a pained gasp.

"I'm sorry Jaida," he said, his eyes on his feet.

"Look at me," I demanded softly.

"Jaida..."

"Look at me!!" I screamed.

He flinched at the sound of my voice, but he did as I asked. He looked at me. That's when I saw it. That's when I saw the guilt, the pain, and most importantly...I saw that he was not as upset by this as I was.

"Ethan why? Why are you doing this to me the night before our wedding?" I asked; the tears were pouring down and creating mascara lines in their wake.

"I don't think that's important..."

"I deserve to know why the love of my life is calling off our wedding! Ethan tell me now!"

"Come on Jaida, I'm just not ready! Why do you need to know so badly?"

"Damn it Ethan! We have been in a relationship since high school, there is no way you're not ready!" I said becoming exasperated with the conversation. He was jerking me around, and I knew it. It pissed me off so much that all I could think about was hitting him across the mouth.

"I cheated on you...twice."

I wanted to hit him, but he beat me to the punch. His words were so harsh that they knocked the wind out of me. I took a step backward and nearly stumbled; the shock from his words made me clumsy. My hand came up to wipe at the stains of my tears as I turned around. I couldn't look at him; I couldn't even bare to be around him at that moment.

"It was a mistake, but once I did it I couldn't take it back. It was with two different women," he said quietly behind me, causing me to sob.

"Two..." was all I could muster.

"Jaida, I didn't want to hurt you."

I wiped at my tears once more before turning around to face that man who I'd never hated so much in my life. He went from high school sweetheart, to piece of garbage in two seconds flat.

"When did you do this?" I asked him.

"Back in college, and then the night of our engagement" he said causing me to moan as if he'd hit me again.

I turned around to leave; I couldn't stand there any longer. I couldn't bear to hear any more from him. I made it only a few steps however; he'd grabbed my arm to stop me. I tried to jerk free, but he wouldn't let me go.

"Let go!" I screamed before turning around with all of my strength, and punching him in the face.

Normally I wasn't violent. But I'd had part of my childhood and the beginning of my adult life spit in my face as if it meant nothing to him. His head jerked back from the impact of the hit, and he stumbled backward while holding his jaw. I didn't want to hurt him, but at least he let me go.

"We are done! Do you understand me? We're done! I _never_ want to see your face, hear your voice, or read your sorry ass messages! You will not call my phone, you will not come to my home, and you definitely will not be a part of my life anymore!" I said as he stood there watching me in shock.

He wasn't expecting the hit, although he's the one who threw the first punch. His lip was bleeding a little amount of blood, but he'd heal. The wound he left on my heart was something that I would never recover from. As I walked away from him, I heard him say that he still loved me before I picked up my pace until I was running towards my car. My shoes were knocking together violently in my hand as I ran faster and faster towards my vehicle. My breath was ragged as I reached the car.

Unlocking my door was harder than it should've been as I fought to see through the blinding tears. When I finally got the door open, I got in my car, cranked the ignition and shot off down the road. I heard a ring on my phone that I'd left in the car. I thought it might have been him so I hesitated. It finally went to voicemail but then picked up once again. Reaching over into the passenger seat, I grabbed the phone and answered it without looking.

"Hello?" I answered with my voice full of emotion.

"Jaida, honey what's wrong?" I heard my best friend ask in a worried tone.

"Nothing, I'm fine," I lied.

"Girl! You better tell me what's wrong right now!"

"I'll tell you when I get there," I said, turning off the exit to change direction. I was already halfway home when I remembered that I still had my bachelorette party to attend. I knew that I wouldn't be up for the party, but my best friend was who I really needed right now.

"Okay girl, I wish you would tell me now, but I can wait. I'll let the girls know too, all right?"

"Ok, thank you, goodbye."

My best friend's house wasn't too far from me, actually the exit I took put me right next to her neighborhood. Coming up on her neighborhood, I drove a few yards down before I came to her house. There were a lot of cars, but I could see some of the girls were leaving.

I drove past them, hoping they wouldn't recognize my car. I didn't want anybody to see me like this except my best friend. I decided to pull up on the grass at a neighbor's house and waited for the rest of the girls to leave. Once they were gone, I pulled up and parked in her driveway.

She knew right away when she saw me. She knew those tears, she'd felt that same pain. When we were in high school she too had a sweetheart, but he cheated on her with her sister. She'd remarried since, but she had severe trust issues. Her husband was quite the man to put up with it, but that's why we all admired him so much. The most awkward part about it was that my now ex fiancé and my best friend Josie's husband, were best friends in college. He was actually at the bachelor party, or he was supposed to be. I wondered, as I walked into her living room and sat down on her couch with a glass of red wine, if Ethan had called off his bachelor party as I did.

"When did it happen?" Josie inquired.

"The first time or the second time?" I asked in response. Josie rolled her hazel eyes and sucked her teeth.

"I should've known his big black ass was cheating. All those muscles and those straight white teeth!" Josie could always make me laugh.

"Josie! I am trying to be mad," I said after a chuckle.

"I'm for real, Jaida, that man has always had hungry eyes," she said seriously.

"Yeah but I thought they were all for me. At least I got to hit him once," I said massaging my knuckles.

"Shut up! No you didn't!" she said genuinely surprised.

"It just came out of me, I feel bad about it...but at the same time I don't. I felt hit when he told me, it was like a punch to the kidneys," I said leaning back as I reached down to touch my sore feet. I hadn't put my shoes back on, and rode all the way to Josie's house barefooted.

"Girl, you let him off easy! You remember what happened with my break-up after I caught Daryl cheating on me?" she stated rather than asking the question. God knows I would never forget that day.

It was on a Saturday afternoon, and Josie and I had just gotten our nails done. Ethan was still at school, and I was off that day. At the time, I was actually living with Josie while I scraped by through college.

We hadn't planned on going back to the apartment; we were supposed to go straight to a movie. Josie had forgotten her movie card, and decided that since we were going to pass our place on the way there, we might as well stop.

"These neighbors always have people over; they never heard of guest parking?" I remember Josie saying as we passed her taken parking spot.

"Ugh, I live here and I never would park in your spot," I said as Josie unbuckled her seat belt.

"Exactly. I'll be right back, girl," Josie had said before jumping out of the car to go into the house.

I remember admiring my nails and relaxing against the car seat as I waited. The sun was bright and sunny, the wind was blowing softly, and the birds were singing my favorite melodies. And then out of nowhere, I heard a scream that ripped through my serenity and straight into my heart.

Jumping out of the car as fast as I could, I ran up the stairs leading to the door, and slammed through it. The entry way was connected to the living room, which eventually led to the kitchen/dining room area. Turning left, I found the stairs that lead to the master bedroom where I heard the scream come from.

As soon as I was in the room, I too couldn't help a little shout of my own. There Daryl lay naked in the bed, holding the sheets to cover his manhood, while non-other than Josie's own sister stood covering her breasts in the corner of the room.

"Are you serious? My sister?!" Josie screamed through furious tears as she took a step further in the bedroom.

"Jo, just hear me out okay?" Daryl said while he still clutched their sheets.

"Shut up! You're a lying cheating bastard! I can't believe you would do this with my sister!" she said as she took another step.

By that moment, I knew that no one else knew I was even there. It was almost as if I were only visible for that one shocked scream I let out, and then no more as the situation escalated. I didn't realize it before, but Josie was walking purposely towards the closet. I didn't understand why at first, but then I suddenly remembered.

And by then, so had Daryl, but by the time she pulled out what she was aiming for, it was too late. Daryl shot up from the bed and stood in front of Josie's sister Amelia. It was something so simple, yet so stupid. This fool had just been caught cheating, and just as his distraught girlfriend pulled out a gun, he goes to protect the woman he was cheating with? I still couldn't understand to this day how he could be so stupid.

"Are you protecting her? You love her Daryl, is that it? You love this little conniving bitch!" Josie had spit that last word out like it was poison.

"Josie, put the gun down," he'd said as he began to walk closer.

"Wrong answer Daryl."

"It was like they knew you were about to shoot," I said to Josie in the present. She smiled and tossed her light brown hair back over her shoulder.

"Come on now. Daryl was stupid but not that dumb," she said as she raked her fingers through her hair at the crown. I noticed that she did this when she felt proud of herself.

"I am though. I should have known."

"Hey, I should've known, it had been going on as long as the relationship of two years. I didn't though, and it is not my fault that he cheated on me. It's him; he's the one that's wrong," she pointed out with such compassion.

"Thanks, Josie."

"Listen girl, you can stay here tonight, I'll run you a nice bubble bath, we'll drink some wine, and then stay up all night eating ice cream and watching chick flicks."

"That sounds good, but I need to go home. Since there's no wedding tomorrow, I'll be going to work. I need to drown myself in it so that I don't think too hard about Ethan," I said.

"I understand. Just call me if you need anything okay? And be safe driving," she said as she walked me to the door.

"I love you Josie," I said giving her a hug. She hugged me back in a way that only she could.

"I love you too Jaida, I'll see you soon, bye hon."

***

Needless to say, people were shocked to see me at work. Not only was it supposed to be the day of my wedding, I looked like a garbage bag. My hair was scraped back into a curly bun type hairstyle, I had no makeup on, and my clothes were wrinkled. This was so unprofessional and so unlike me, but I didn't feel like me since last night. I felt like a human vessel filled with pain and sorrow. As I unlocked the door to my office, I realized after the second and third unsuccessful attempt to get it open, that I was using my car key. Waking up, I finally got the right key out, and made it into my office.

This was so not like my bubbly personality. What had I let this man do to me? Five minutes after I sat behind my desk my boss walked in and closed the door behind her. She walked only a few steps in before she stopped and stared at me. She looked worried, a little angry, bust most of all confused.

"He cheated on you didn't he?" She asked. What the hell?

"How did you...?" I started.

"Don't worry about how I know," she said cutting me off, "What's important is that you don't lose yourself to the cruel actions of some jerk off. Listen you need to keep your vacation, as a matter of fact, I'll add a few extra days as long as you promise me one thing."

"And that is?" I asked.

"Get your ass up, get it on that plane, and enjoy your honeymoon," she said.

"Honeymoon...I'd forgotten all about that. I can't go without him."

"Nonsense! You're to go on that trip or you're fired," she said with a wink as she turned around to walk away.

"Thank you, Mrs. Gallagher," I said before she had the chance to leave.

"Put on some lipstick and remember that no man is strong enough to break your heart. You're welcome Jaida, I'll see you when I see you" and with that she was gone.

And after a few moments of shock, I made the necessary arrangements over the phone, and left the office.

# Chapter Four

The Gran Malia in Rio Grande, Puerto Rico was the most beautiful city and place I had ever visited. The people were gorgeous, the smell was inviting and the climate was just the way I liked it. The sun kissed my skin, and naturally lightened my usually darker curls. As soon as I got to the hotel I was greeted by a beautiful woman with a thick Spanish accent.

I couldn't help but thank God that Ethan wasn't here; he'd probably lay her for all I knew. I had to concentrate on the positive, and force Ethan out of my mind. This was still my honeymoon and I wasn't going to let him ruin it.

The receptionist at the front desk looked puzzled when I said that my husband wouldn't be joining me, on account of the fact that he's a cheating bastard and I refuse to marry him. I could've left that part out, but I didn't.

Almost immediately after I'd gotten to my hotel room, I'd fallen asleep. When I woke up, it was eight. Though the room was absolutely beautiful, I couldn't stay here. I threw on a deep purple sundress, took my hair down out of its tangled bun that I'd been donning since yesterday at work, and made it look more presentable. I wasn't runway ready, but I wasn't looking to impress anyone either. Right now, I was looking for a strong Bahama Mama at a bar to drink away my sorrows.

***

When I finally got back to my hotel room, it was by the grace of God, and also the receptionist at the front desk. The one that I'd told my life story to. Turns out her name is Sonya, and she's the sweetest lady I'd ever met. She helped me onto my bed, and out of my sandals, and even left a glass of ice cold water beside my bed with the instructions to drink two before falling asleep. Before she left, she placed two Tylenol on my bedside table next to my glass of water. My lamp was still on, but the light was dim enough for me to be able to fall asleep within a matter of minutes.

I knew I was dreaming the moment my hand slipped into Ethan's. His smile was bright and exuberant while he looked into my eyes. I saw that he had no bags under his eyes like he did the last time. I also noticed that he had no facial hair. His hand was smaller, along with his stature.

As we ran, I noticed that the field we ran through was bright and vibrant in color. The clouds were white and fluffy, and the sky was as blue as a robin's egg. The temperature was what changed first. It went gradually from entirely warm to chilly, until it was downright freezing. The sky had shriveled into a depressing gray, and the field was covered in dirty snow. When I finally noticed Ethan, he looked the way he did when I left him. Older, sadder, and tired.

I woke up with a jolt. That dream was not something that I wanted to experience again. I had a hard time controlling my tears, and my head was throbbing against my skull. I felt like it was fighting to get out. I immediately grabbed my drink and spilled some in the process of grabbing the medicine that Sonya had left me.

Throwing them to the back of my throat before downing the entire glass, I slammed the cup down and flinched at the sound of it.

"Jaida? Ms. Jaida? Are you still sleeping?" I heard a thick Spanish accent call through the door.

"Oh thank God!" I said to myself, "I'm awake, I'm coming!" I said as I gingerly made my way to the door.

"Aye dios, you look terrible! Did you drink the water last night?" she asked. I instantly felt guilty.

"I just did this morning, I'm sorry!" I said closing and locking the door behind us.

"Oh, I figured you wouldn't have. You were so tired, I felt so sorry for you," she sympathized while trying to fix my hair for me.

Studying her carefully, I noticed a small scar on her forehead and her lower jaw. I didn't want to get caught staring so I focused on her eyes. They were dark, but gray and beautiful. They were like I'd never seen before. Her hair was a dirty blonde which cast a great contrast against her dark skin.

"I will make you something for hangovers, okay? You get yourself fixed up and I will be back."

"Oh, you don't have to do that, you're probably working right?" I asked as I started looking through my bags.

"Oh no honey, my papa owns this place, I work here when I feel like it. I'll be right back," she said with a wink, and was off before I could say anything else.

Figuring that I might as well get myself together, I went through my luggage to find something to wear before I went to the bathroom and hopped in the shower. I figured that a hot steamy shower should do the trick. It always made me feel better when I was suffering from a hangover. Plus whatever Sonya had in store, I should be feeling great by this afternoon.

It worked the way I thought it would. After my shower, I already felt ten times better. I still had a little bit of a headache, but I didn't feel dizzy and nauseous anymore. I did still feel weak though, so I took it easy when getting out of the shower. I figured that I should probably wash my face and moisturize my hair with some leave-in conditioner and some old-fashioned H2O.

My hair was usually a tangled mess in the morning after not wrapping it up, but when I woke up, I noticed that I was laying on the same side I'd fallen asleep on. I promised right then and there that I would never drink that much again.

I decided to throw on some perfume. Though I instantly regretted it. It was too strong and brought back a wave of nausea. I found a window not too far from the mirror that I stood in front of, and walked over to crack it open. The breeze gently caressed my face as it brought in the smells of Rio Grande. A small smile reached my lips as I turned to face the bathroom. I felt that everything, since last night, had been a blur of alcoholism and drowning my sorrows in it.

I never took the time to appreciate my surroundings. The bathroom, that I was standing in, was the color of the sand on the beaches of Puerto Rico. The mirror was the perfect size with lighting that made every swipe and application of make-up perfect.

As I walked out and into my junior suite, I noticed that the colors spilled from the bathroom and decorated the room nicely. The room was furnished with sturdy mahogany that glowed in the light let in through my personal balcony. I'd dressed myself in a short but flowing floral dress that showed my knees

As I opened my balcony door, I heard a knock at the main one. Turning away and deciding to save that for later, I made it towards the front door. As I opened the door, the smell of coffee and lemon awakened my senses.

"Room service!" Sonya said as she walked in with coffee.

"Oh, you are a life saver!" I exclaimed excitedly.

"Where should I put it? I found a spot," she said answering her question as she took a seat. Taking the seat next to her, I welcomingly accepted the cup of coffee she offered and blew on the steaming brew before taking a sip.

"Oh, this is so delicious!" I exclaimed as the first sip hit me like a burst of sweet fire. It was seasoned with cinnamon, honey, and some other seasoning that I couldn't name. Either way, this was going to have to be an every morning thing.

"Thank you, and trust me you don't need to have a hangover to enjoy. My mama used to make this for me until I got pregnant," she said offering me a slice of lemon. I took it and added it to the concoction.

"How old is your little one?" I asked her.

"He's three, he'll be turning four on the sixth."

"Oh, after Independence Day," I commented.

"Yes ma'am, you'll enjoy what the resort has planned for the fourth. It's a very festive event."

"I'll bet," I said after taking another sip of coffee.

"So, I remember you said that you were alone..." Sonya mentioned casually.

"Oh, right...that. About that, I'm really sorry for blurting that out at you," I said hiding my shame behind my mug full of spiced coffee.

"Don't worry, I wasn't surprised," she suddenly realizing how that sounded and began to turn red, "What I meant by that is we get a lot of solo honeymoons! Sorry!" she said.

"No don't be, I understood what you meant. I guess I'm not the only who has heartbreak," I said placing my empty cup back down.

"You definitely aren't; there's a man here on his own. He's very handsome and I think he's single," she said prodding me.

"Oh please! No, no, no! Never again!" I said swearing off all men.

"Okay, but don't say I never did anything for you," she said smiling.

"Leaving?" I asked as she collected my mug.

"Yes, I promised to take Matthias, my son, to the park for the resort today."

"Oh, that's nice, well you two have fun. Thank you again for the help last night; I really appreciate it," I said while she walked up to the door.

"Not a problem, you should go to the Yhi Spa; it is heaven on earth!" she said as she stood in the hall.

# Chapter Five

Being that it was already the middle of the day, I'd already missed the opportunity to watch the sunrise. I always liked to travel, and my biggest delight was taking photos of the sunrise in different cities and countries. I figured that I would just make sure that I went to bed a little early tonight so that I could catch it.

Getting my phone, I ventured out of my room and onto the resort. The breeze was so fresh and sweet that I could almost taste it. The climate was perfect; humid but not like I was going to drown in it. As my sandals clicked against the pavement as my feet carried me onwards, I noticed how different the hotel was.

It went from grand and regal to still beautiful but relaxing and tropical. I soon found my feet crunching on the beige gravel as my steps were covered by the shadows of palm trees. As I walked further, I noticed there seemed to be structures that I soon found out were little day beds. "Prefect." I thought as I made my way towards one of them.

I saw a movement and out of the corner of my eye, I saw something green flash. I'd reached the bed by now, and was holding on to the side as I watched a large sized Iguana emerge from the shroud of vegetation.

"Godzilla," I whispered before I heard a soft chuckle next to me. Jerking my head in the direction of the sound, I noticed a very tall man leaning against the opposite side of the frame. His hair was jet black and his same colored brows framed his steel blue eyes like perfection. His smile was pink and full, and his jaw was chiseled and outlined in sexy stubble.

"Hi, my name is Axel," he said extending his hand, showing off his large bicep. I really needed to get a grip, I wasn't even attracted to white guys...right?

"Hi, I'm Jaida," I said as I took his large hand in mine. Where was my voice? Hell, where was my hand for that matter? It nearly disappeared in his warm grip.

"Those iguanas pop up out of nowhere. Or, should I say, those Godzilla's," he said with a wink and a smile.

Damn this man was to fine for his own good. It just wasn't fair. I was only five foot five, but he easily towered over me by a foot. His shoulders were broad and strong, his chest was sturdy and chiseled beneath his v neck shirt, and his body tapered perfectly into strong legs. He was built like a superhero, and damn if I wasn't a damsel in distress.

"Yeah, look at the size of that one!" I said pointing in the direction of where I last saw the monster. Just my luck, the iguana played me like a fool and disappeared, making me look delusional in front of Mr. Sexy.

"What are you talking about?" he asked me in a joking manner. I couldn't help but smile; his grin was so contagious.

"Hey, I know I'm crazy to a certain point, but I know I saw Godzilla," I joked back. His chuckle rumbled deep within his chest as he straightened up and came closer to me. My heart skipped a beat as he took a seat on the bed next to where I was standing.

"Care to join me?" he asked as I stood there, nearly frozen in place.

I smiled before I took a seat next to him, though not too close. I smoothed out my dress as I sat down with a smile in his direction as he returned a dazzling one of his own. I dare not think that he was as attracted to me as I was to him. I never thought I was an ugly girl by no means, but there was no way this GQ model would go for an accountant like me. Besides, I'd already sworn off all men.

"You think a lot don't you? And fast too...is that part of your job?" he asked. Had this man just read me?

"Um, I'm an accountant at a law firm, so, I guess you could say that I need to think fast and often," I said confirming his suspicion as he nodded his head.

"I guessed that. My mom was an accountant, she often had that look on her face when she pondered things."

"Aww, that's sweet."

"What do you mean?" he asked a little confused by my comment.

"I mean, a lot of men don't remember such small things. You're very observant," I commented.

"I enjoy being able to sit back and just watch people's mannerisms. I almost got a job with the government but decided to go with technology."

"Oh yeah? That's cool, what company do you work for?" I asked knowing how much it costs to come here. Ethan and I saved up for a few months to afford this place.

"I own my own company," he said simply.

"Oh, good for you," I said.

"You actually seem congratulatory," he said a little surprised.

"I'm one of those few people who enjoy seeing people happy and thriving," I said with a shrug and a chuckle.

"That's very refreshing to hear," he said as he studied my face.

"What is the name of your company?" I asked feeling shy under his piercing gaze.

"FrostFire Industries," he stated.

FrostFire Computers were considered to be the most technologically advanced computers currently on the market.

"I actually work on a FrostFire," I said with a chuckle.

"Do you? Awesome, that's good to hear. How does it run?" he asked genuinely, as if he didn't know the answer.

"Amazing," I said matter-of-factly.

He laughed genuinely with his head back and his hand on his stomach. The sound was melodic and strong. I found myself laughing along with him as it died down. I noticed an unruly curl that liked to make its presence known in the middle of my forehead every once in a while, pop back up and tickled my brow. Tucking it back, I noticed that his eyes watched my every movement. I should feel uncomfortable, but there was something about his gaze. I truly felt admired.

"My hair likes to grab my face every once in a while," I said, pushing back my curly bundle.

"You seem to have a lot of it," he said leaning forward, his deep voice closer than ever before.

"Since birth; full head of crazy curls," I said as I looked into his gaze.

"So what brings you here?" he asked me suddenly sitting back.

"Oh...just vacation," I said continuing to smooth my locks; my eyes were now on the lush vegetation before me.

"I won't prod," he said winking at me as I looked over.

"What about you?" I asked directing the conversation towards him.

"Just vacation. I needed a break from the company, from the computers, and from the people," he said.

Although I couldn't boast about my observation skills, I felt he was telling the truth.

"So here you are basically giving me your actual excuse for being here and I have fallen short," I said leaning against my right arm.

"Like I said; I won't prod. Besides, I'll be here for a week, if you feel you want to tell me by then, you can be my guest," he said as he pushed himself up from the seat. My eyes ran up the length of his impressive body as he turned to look at me full on.

"It was nice to have met you, Jaida. This might be forward, but, would you mind joining me for dinner tonight? There's an Asian bistro on the resort that I have been dying to check out," he offered.

"I'd love to. What time?" I asked.

"Does six sound good?" he asked; I'd never seen a smile so bright.

"Sure, I'll meet you there," I responded.

"I'd rather escort you," he offered, completely throwing me off guard. I thought all men were pigs?

"Oh."

"We could meet in the lobby so that you don't feel like I'm only trying to figure out what room you're staying in," he said with a wink. I chuckled slightly; was it that obvious?

"That sounds fine. That's kind of nice actually," I admitted as I continued to hold his gaze.

"Great, I'll see you then," he said.

"I won't be late," I said maybe a little too excitedly.

I felt embarrassed, but he soon extinguished that feeling as he reached for my hand. Placing it in his, I nearly blushed as his lips met with the back of my hand. The contact caused heat to rush from the spot his lips connected with, down through my core.

"I know you won't," he said softly before he turned around and walked away.

What had just happened? I just broke up with the love of my life only three days ago, and here I was going on a date with this stranger? Axel, the owner of FrostFire Computers, to say the least.

***

It was about four when I heard a knock at my door. I had my flat iron gripped in my hair as I slid it down my blown out curls. Finishing up that section before I made it towards the door, I smiled a greeting towards my new friend, Sonya.

"Hey, good to see you! I was hoping that you would come by, where's Matthias?" I asked as we walked into the bathroom.

"Oh, he is with his papa. We met up at the park today," she answered as she voluntarily began to help me with my hair.

I was about to object; only Josie knew how to do my hair the way I liked it. But Sonya seemed like she knew what she was doing. Actually, she seemed to know more than I did. The way she used the hair care products in conjunction with the heat tools made me feel like she did this for a living.

"I got my certificate for cosmetology in France," she said simply.

"Well, by all means, but I have a date at five-thirty," I said batting my eyes animatedly.

"OH! Mirate! Look at you!" she translated in English.

"Yeah, I know how much of a hypocrite I am."

"Don't worry, I don't judge. If you're going out with who I think you're going out with, I totally understand," she said with a slight pucker to her lips. Josie did the same thing when she was speaking matter-of-factly, especially when it came to gorgeous men.

"His name is Axel Frost," I said remembering the story behind the company logo. Fire was his father's personality while Frost was their last name. He'd lost his dad not too long before he launched his first line of computers and decided to change the name of the company from just Frost Computers to FrostFire Computers.

"Oh, that is Mr. Sexy!" she said.

I laughed at the name she'd chosen for him, being that I'd already deemed him Mr. Sexy myself. "Great minds think alike, I gave him that name the moment I saw him!" I said laughing as she put the finishing touches to my hair.

"Wow, my hair looks great! Good thing you showed up when you did, I could never get it to look like this. Then again, I'm not some super fancy cosmetologist!" I said causing her to laugh at my compliment.

"Don't worry, while you're here, I'll teach you some things."

"Thank you for being so nice. Having someone cheat on you after so long is the hardest thing to deal with," I said as I looked down to pick out some makeup.

I noticed though that when I looked up, her face was a little somber, like she was thinking about something. Maybe she had been through the same thing I had? Before I could say anything to her, her face had brightened up when she saw my makeup.

"May I do the honors?" she asked.

Admiring what she did with my hair, I obliged.

# Chapter Six

When I reached the front lobby, I was exhausted from the trip. This resort was huge and the walking was a plenty. But every step was worth it. It was such a beautiful escape from San Francisco. The palm trees, the flowers, even the iguanas were welcome in my company.

Though I was tired, the jitters would not allow me to keep still. So I started wandering around the vast lobby, stopping every now and again to touch a flower here, and to read a brochure there.

It wasn't that Axel was late; I was early. Fifteen minutes early to be exact. I left earlier to give myself time to decide whether or not I wanted to stay. Axel seemed like a great guy, but I just went down that road. Just to be cheated on at a pit stop. Suddenly my mood changed.

I felt saddened, broken, and just awful. Like those emotions from that night came up and slapped me in the face. I tried to fight back tears, and nearly lost the battle when I remembered my boss's words. "Put on some lipstick and remember that no man is strong enough to break your heart."

I needed those words at that moment. They are what helped me fight back these tears. I smiled as I rummage through my clutch for some red lipstick. Using the mirror that was built in, I smoothed the lipstick over my full lips before closing the tube and resealing the clutch.

"Jaida?" I heard him say.

I could see him out of the corner of my eye before I turned my head to take him all in. My God, he was dressed to the nines in his steel gray dress shirt and black dress pants. His stature commanded attention as he glided down the lobby towards me. And as he came closer, I could tell that he was equally impressed by my look. I was wearing a long royal purple dress that swayed to reveal a deep slit that bared my toned legs. It hugged my curves sensually as the quarter sleeves were made up of intricate lace. My hair was down to the middle of my back in soft romantic curls, and my makeup was subtle complimenting the almond shape of my eyes.

"I'm stunned, you're even more beautiful now than when I first saw you," He complimented softly.

"Thank you, Axel. You look incredible yourself."

"Do I?" he asked in such a goofy manner I couldn't help but to laugh.

"Sorry, I have a tendency to lose my composure around gorgeous women," he said offering his arm to me. I found myself admiring the way his muscles rippled underneath his slightly hairy arm. The same black silk that adorned his crown.

"Well that's okay, I have the tendency to babble about nothing when I'm around a gorgeous man," I said as we began to walk to our destination.

"That's alright, we'll be good buffers for one another," he said looking down at me as I looked up at him.

This man would be the death of me. He smelled like pure ecstasy, I found my breasts tightening as his gaze roamed over my body. I didn't make it apparent that I could see him, and I wasn't going to. It felt so good to have someone admire me. Ethan would look at me every once and a while, but never with a hunger like this.

Had I really been that oblivious? Now that I thought about it, Ethan hadn't been as affectionate or caring as he used to be. It stopped being magical about two years back, but I just felt that we were getting accustomed to each other. I should've seen it coming.

"You're thinking way too hard, Jaida; we're on vacation remember?" Axel said interrupting my downward spiral. If this wasn't going anywhere far, Axel was a seriously good distraction right now.

Like a gentleman, Axel pulled out my chair and pushed it in before taking the seat next to me. We were sitting behind the fanciest Teppanyaki grill I had ever seen. The menus were so extensive with sushi and so many different Asian cuisines. I decided on a roll that was dressed with fancy ingredients and colorful sauces on top of the Teppanyaki steak and shrimp on the grill.

Axel went with the filet minion and lobster special.

The food was prepared excellently and the sushi roll that I had was the best that I'd ever had in my life! It was absolutely delicious. Axel had eaten just about everything on his plate. I was impressed with his appetite being that he was very fit. I was glad that he didn't have the chef trim the fat. Something about a person, male or female, that could enjoy the guilty pleasures in life was incredibly sexy to me.

"Wow, dinner was fantastic," he said wiping his chin with his table napkin.

"Amazing isn't even the word, my friend," I said patting my belly.

"How was that roll?" he asked taking a sip from his cup while the waitress came around with the bills.

"I've never had anything that delicious."

When she got to us, she handed me my bill before handing Axel his with a smile. Checking out the damage, I didn't feel as bad as I thought I would. It was fifty dollars, but it wasn't going to break me. Reaching below the table for my clutch, I straightened up with my card in hand when I noticed that my bill had disappeared. I looked to my right thinking that possibly my hair had swept it off the bar, but it hadn't.

"You guys have a great rest of your night," the waitress said, as she placed a card and a few receipts back on the bar. I went to ask the server to print me up another ticket when I heard Axel chuckle.

"Axel, I was going to pay for that. You didn't have to," I actually felt that maybe he didn't believe me for a second.

"I know. But I asked you on this date; I fully expected to pay," he said as he smoothed my right sleeve. His touch sent goose bumps up my arms and down my spine.

"Thank you, Axel," I stated genuinely. I was very grateful for his act of kindness. Though he made more than I did, Ethan was always okay with me paying for our dinners. I thought I didn't mind until Axel just paid for mine.

"You're welcome, Jaida," he said as his gaze locked with mine.

I felt so impelled to take his mouth in a kiss. His lips were so inviting and full. I tried so hard to stop my eyes from breaking contact with his so that I could stare at his lips. But his eyes were so mesmerizing I found myself leaning closer before reality hit me.

I suddenly readjusted myself to make it seem that I'd leaned purpose for that purpose alone. I didn't want him to think that I was desperate. I mean, he was incredible to look at, and he did just buy me a meal, but what if he just wanted to get in my pants? I couldn't deal with that on top of everything else.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked softly.

"Ready when you are," he said standing up and extending his hand down towards me. I took it in mine and stood.

When we made it back to the lobby, it was only eight at night. Still fairly early, but I decided to turn in for the night so that I could wake up in time for the sunset with my camera at the ready.

We were nearly silent the whole walk back, but I found that didn't bother me; his company and his presence soothed me enough to where I didn't feel the need to talk.

Axel was now facing me, his hands behind his back, giving him a more authoritative stance as we waited for the next move. I didn't know exactly where to start, so I just waited for him.

"Well, I would walk you back, but I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. Although I would prefer to, just to make sure you make it back safe," he said.

"You can walk me back," I stated; in that short time I'd grown a little more trust in him.

He smiled and nodded as he again took my arm in his.

The walk back seemed shorter than the walk I took to meet him. Probably because I didn't want the night to end so soon. Part of me honestly wanted to tear his clothes off with my teeth while the other part just wanted to sit up and talk. I knew that I couldn't have either, not without inviting sex into the equation, so I decided to say goodnight at the door.

Before he left, I stopped him by placing my hand on his shoulder.

"You really are quite the gentleman, Axel."

He brought the back of my hand to his lips before smiling and walking away.

Sleep was going to be hard to come by tonight.

When I woke up, it was to the alarm on my phone. The sun was still sleeping, giving me enough time to go to the bathroom and get dressed. I threw on some short denim shorts and a white scoop neck t-shirt before I headed outside with my camera in hand. I already knew where I wanted to capture the sunrise, and it was at the secluded beach on the resort.

I needed to hurry before it was too late. Though I had plenty of time, I still felt as though I should speed up. That's when I thought to myself. _What am I doing? I'm not at work! I'm on vacation!_ I needed to let go of my everyday life this week, and that's exactly what I was going to do.

Deliberately slowing down my pace, I took the time to appreciate the foliage and the smells of the flowers. I took in the sweet and salty smell of the sea as its scent sailed through the breeze. I made sure that I stopped to stick my toes in the soft sands of the Caribbean before I readied my camera for the perfect shot.

As the sun began to slowly rise and peak above the horizon, I found myself thinking about Axel's eyes. As the warmth from the sun's rays began to touch my skin, I remembered Axel's warm kisses on my hand. I found myself wishing that he'd given me even more.

As I snapped the first picture, I found myself chuckling slightly at the memory of Axel's goofy demeanor. It was just as sexy as his serious mannerism. By the time the sun was above the horizon, I'd taken about twenty shots. I felt that was more than enough to add to my gallery, and began to make my way back to my room.

I figured I'd take a nap, being that I woke up before the sun. Also because there was no way I could ever do this back in San Francisco. My eyes were on the path ahead of me, until I found them directing my hands to open up my camera. The pictures were even stunning the second time.

"You're going to run into me if you don't look up," I heard a deep voice warn playfully.

"Oh sorry...," I apologized as I looked up, but smiled when I saw who it was, 'Axel.'

"Good morning Jaida, did you get your pictures?" he asked before coming to stand beside me as he looked down at my camera.

"I got at least twenty of them. I have a collage on my wall at home of the places that I've been. Every year I try and get a few pictures of the sunrise in different places. Here's a picture of my wall at home," I said as I clicked through the pictures on my camera.

"That's impressive," he said honestly as he nodded his head in approval.

"Thank you. I started when I was twelve and my dad took me on my first trip to Italy. I couldn't sleep because I was so excited to be in another country that I stayed up. He'd bought me a camera especially for that trip, and our view gave me the perfect opportunity to take a few pictures."

I turned my head to look up at him to notice that he was already looking at me. He smiled a beautiful smile which coaxed one of my own. Just like at dinner, I found it hard not to look at those lips.

Again I looked away. I wanted him, but I shouldn't. I turned my attention back to my camera, trying hard to hide my shame. He was smart and intuitive enough to know what just happened; I felt too embarrassed to say anything.

"Have you eaten breakfast yet?" he asked softly.

"Um, no, I was actually thinking about taking a nap," I said, the embarrassment causing my "stick-in-the-mud" persona.

"You could take a nap," he said shocking me with two fingers under my chin as he lifted my eyes to connect with his, "But I wouldn't be able to spend the time with you that I wanted," he finished with a smile.

My heart was pounding in my chest so hard that I could feel it in my throat. If his fingers were any lower, he would've felt it too. My breath was coming out a little quicker than I wanted it to, and I could feel my nipples tightening as his breath polished my lips.

"Let's get some breakfast," he said close to my lips.

"Yeah, sounds good."

# Chapter Seven

After I had changed into more formal pants and a blouse, Axel and I decided to dine at one of the resort's beautiful cafes. I remembered seeing it on the brochure. It was so regal but not intimidating as it was painted the prettiest blue I had seen in a restaurant. Axel pulled my chair out again before taking his seat across the table from me.

We ordered a light but delicious breakfast that didn't fill us but satisfied us none the least. When the bill came, I offered to pay, but Axel smoothly declined and sent the waitress on her way with his card in tow. He was now shaking his head at me in a playful manner.

"I believe in chivalry. I know you were used to footing the bill in your previous relationship, and I know we aren't an item, but I'm old fashioned in the sense that a man should pay the bill."

I was taken aback slightly by his accuracy. His intellect was impressive, but it did bring up feelings that I was trying to suppress.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings," he said sincerely as he leaned forward, his hand reached out to touch my elbow as I brought my hand to my mouth.

I didn't realize how his words would hit me until they were spoken. It wasn't as if he were intentionally trying to hurt me. I was just super sensitive; it did just happen this week. Taking a deep breath and collecting myself before I gave in to the tears that were building pressure behind my eyes, I put on a smile and faced him.

"I know. It's just fresh...I...I'm sorry Axel, I have to go," I said and abruptly stood. I hit the table with my legs and caused water to spill in his lap, but I only said sorry as I retreated to my room. I was almost running by the time I got to my door, it was as if I were going to throw up, but in actuality, I was only coming in here to cry.

I threw myself on my bed and immediately began to sob. All the tears that I had kept in came pouring out like raindrops as they streaked my cheeks and soaked my pillow. I grabbed the pillow and held it close as I wrapped my arms around it.

I thought about Ethan. Instead of pushing him to the back of my mind, I thought about him. I recalled every little detail about him. The way he smelled, the way his lips tasted and the way he talked to me. I remembered how he was in our relationship. I remembered how caring he seemed and how sweet he was.

I then thought about how our relationship used to be when we were truly happy. Before the first woman and before the second woman or however many there were. I thought about the happiness we shared and he threw away over some other women I thought about everything that we'd ever built together and how he didn't feel that it was as important as I did.

As I sobbed, I then started to think about all the little things that used to annoy me about him. I thought of the stupid way he would chew, how sloppy of a kisser he could be during sex, and the fact that he very rarely ever footed the bill. And this was well after he was hired to work for the hospital and making six figures.

I remembered how he was only affectionate during sex, but after he would just roll over and go to sleep. He has never kissed the back of my hand, never once had he pulled out my chair for me, and he definitely wasn't a gentlemen. Axel was though, and I had just run away from him after splashing a drink on his lap. Good thing it was water, but it was still just as insulting. He'd just paid for my breakfast for goodness sakes!

A gentle knock on my door caused me to jerk upright; I wasn't expecting any visitors. I figured that it would be the maid service, or even Sonya. But it wasn't either of them.

"Oh, hi...uh-Axel," I said looking down at the ground. I tried my best to cover my face. I hadn't even dried my tears.

"I probably should just stay in here for a while to give myself a chance to calm down..." My voice trailed off as all I felt were two sturdy arms wrapped around me. The door slammed shut, and all I could feel was warmth. I'd collected myself, but only for a few moments before I instantly started sobbing again. My arms came up to wrap around his body as he smoothed his hand over my hair. He held me so tenderly I felt as though he actually cared. This man, that I had known for only a few days, showed more concern in this embrace than Ethan ever had in the entirety of our relationship.

This hit me, and I began to sob harder. I buried my face deeper into his sturdy chest, breathing him in with every sob, holding him closer with every beating of our hearts. His fingers made their way from the tendrils of my hair to my cheek to dry my tears. He wiped them away so gingerly, so tenderly...so sweetly.

At that moment, I grew closer to him than I had to Ethan in the years we'd been together. I'd stopped sobbing as soon as his fingers caressed my cheek. My hands were wrinkling the back of his shirt I was gripping it so tightly. As I lifted my head, I notice that the front of his shirt clung to his chest being that my tears had soaked them. Navy blue looked so good on him, especially against his gray slacks and beige cardigan.

He dressed so sharp, and he smelled like a fantasy come true. As I looked further up, I noticed that his chin was tilted; his eyes were on me, but did I dare look up? As I felt his breath against my forehead, my eyes clamped shut as I felt his soft lips against my skin.

My breath caught in my throat because my heart started beating so rapidly that I could barely remember to breathe. The second kiss came just like the first; soft and sweet as it landed on my cheek. He kissed me there twice before I finally lifted my head to look at him.

His lips were on the tip of my nose for just a second before he pulled away. My heart was beating so fast I knew there was no way he couldn't feel it. My eyes trailed from his hairline down his strong, sturdy nose, to his lips, and finally to connect with his eyes.

His eyes were darker as I looked into them. They were dilated and spoke a clear message as they bore into mine. I kept his gaze, inviting him, coaxing him, as I titled my head back slightly; my lips were there for the taking. I wanted him to kiss me so bad that I could almost taste him.

Slowly he bent his head; his lips grazed mine so softly I could've mistaken their presence for the slight whisper of his breath. His lips pressed against mine so tenderly, so gingerly it was almost as if he'd never kissed before. Not that it didn't seem like he didn't know what he was doing, it was more like tasting the forbidden fruit. He wanted it with all of the lust in his body, but he knew that it was not his for the taking.

This made him crave for it more and more as he deepened the kiss. His tongue began to prod and tease before I accepted it in my mouth. It swirled and danced with mine sensually as his hands began to roam. They were sick with wanderlust as they roamed every inch of my body. I felt them down my back, over my shoulders, and over the swell of my ass. I pressed my body against his as he began to tease my nipples. I gasped at the intensity of the sensations that pulsed through my veins making my blood grow hot. He was driving me crazy, I wanted more of him, and I could tell by the stiffness in his pants that he craved me as well.

I moaned into his mouth as he began to caress my breasts with such vigor that I started to quiver internally. He began to walk forward, leading me backward to the bed before we fell down in a heap of black and white. Our arms wrapping around each other, our hands exploring, and our lips locking as our tongues tasted. This was going so fast that I didn't even realize that my pants were unbuttoned.

My eyes opened slightly as I felt Axel begin to pull my pants down past my thighs, over my knees, and down my calves. I bit my lip as he came up to place his lips on my smooth stomach. I sucked in my breath at the feel of his lips against my skin as they connected with the flesh of my breasts. My shirt was above my head, off, and across the room with one flick of the wrist.

He paused for a moment to admire my skin. His hand came up to touch it softly as though my body was beautiful marble. He took time to appreciate and remember each and every curve. He admired every inch of me, as he seemed to taste and caress each spot. I'd never been admired like this before; never.

He finally turned his attention back to my lips as he sank his into mine. His lips passed over mine over and over again as I writhed against his body. I craved him and I ached for him as he kneaded my breasts firmly. I lifted his shirt above his head and had to take a moment to admire the intricate pattern of his washboard abs. His hands were beginning to unbutton his pants before he stopped to reach into his pocket.

"What are you looking for?" I asked as he searched through his wallet. I don't know what he was looking for, but I knew he couldn't find it. Closing his wallet his hands came down on either side of me as he hung his head in shame.

"The missing condom," he said.

"Oh..." I said feeling the disappointment crawl up through my abdomen. It's not like we couldn't get one, but the moment was over.

"I'm sorry, Jaida. I would really love to rip those panties off with my teeth but, we don't have any birth control."

"Yeah, I haven't been on it for a while now. Ethan and I were supposed to have a baby after we got married..." I stopped talking and cleared my throat. "Nothing, sorry," I mumbled before turning away and crawling up the bed towards the pillows. I immediately flipped the soaked plush over to hide it from Axel's scrutiny.

"So, Ethan is the name of the man who put those tears on that pillow," he said as he came up to sit next to me. I felt like a child as I crossed my arms underneath my breasts and turned my head slightly away from him. How could I just blurt that out like that?

"Why are you so observant?" I asked trying not to laugh but ultimately failing. He laughed along with me before wrapping his arms around my waist as he pulled me into him.

"I was really nosey as a kid," he said with a chuckle as I leaned my head against his bare chest. His heartbeat was so melodic I could get lost in the rhythm of it.

"We were supposed to get married and have three kids," I said quietly as the laughter died down. Axel just listened to me as I began to talk.

"We met when we were freshmen in High School. We were such nerds, small and feeble. We looked out for each other when we could. We always got picked on; I had braces and he had glasses and braces, so we weren't the popular ones in school. Then as we got older, our bodies started changing. By sophomore year I had boobs and he started bulking up; we also realized that we had feelings for each other. He was my first kiss, my first boyfriend, and my first lover."

I snuggled closer to him as I wrapped my arms around his torso. I smiled slightly when his hand came up to reach my hair as he gently stroked it. He didn't say anything but I knew that he was listening.

"There came a point in high school when we were the popular kids. A lot of girls tried to hit on him, but he never batted an eye. He only saw me. Two eight years after our graduation, Ethan proposed to me. Two years after that we started planning our wedding. Ethan wanted to be established in his career before we were married; he wanted to be able to provide for our kids and not struggle like our parents.

"The night before our wedding he calls me to the same place he proposed to me, and tells me that he cheated on me with two different women. He calls off the wedding, and I put an end to our lives together. The next day, I pack my bags, get the 'ok' from my boss, and hoped on the flight that we were supposed to take together. Now I'm here," I finally finished with a sigh.

"I'm a very understanding person, but some people just baffle me. I would kill to be able to have a woman loyal enough to stay by my side for so many years," he said with such sincerity.

"Axel, why are you single?" I asked as I picked my head off of his chest to look into his eyes. My hair was falling down in front of my face, and smoothing it back, I tossed it to the side as I waited for his reply.

"I'm thirty five years old, I think I am attractive, I'm educated, and I love to cater to the woman in my life. But when women see me, they are only interested in the fact that I'm wealthy."

"Oh, right. You're having a hard time finding someone who's there for you and not you money. I get it," I said looking away and at the sun as it peeked through the balcony doors.

"But then there's you," he said causing me to stare back into his eyes.

"Me?" I asked perplexed.

"You. When you first saw me, you didn't recognize me. But when you finally did, you weren't star struck. You didn't seem like it mattered to you that I was featured in Forbes magazine. When you saw me for the first time, you only saw what was in front of you, not what was in my pocket," he said, easing my confusion.

"I have my own money. I'm not a billionaire, but I don't have to be. I have more than enough to live comfortably on my own without help from anybody else," I said simply.

"Spoken like a real woman," he said causing me to smile proudly.

"Well..." I said animatedly shrugging my shoulders like it was no big deal.

"You know, this might make you feel weird but, I've never dated anyone...like you," he said simply.

"You mean...short?" I asked giving him a little wink.

"You know exactly what I mean, I'm trying not to sound offensive here!" he said giving me a little poke in my side.

"You mean somebody who is black?" I asked him as the word 'Bingo' all but appeared in big red letters on his forehead.

"There you go. Good, now I don't have to say it."

"What? You were nearly in my cookie jar and you were afraid of telling me you'd never had chocolate chip?" I asked putting my hands on my hips. He chuckled, embarrassed at my brashness.

"I have never been romantically involved with a black woman. Not by choice, but by circumstance."

"That's okay, I've never been with a man who wasn't Ethan and Ethan was pure chocolate," I said as I came close enough to him that if I leaned forward I could easily peck his lips.

"So are you normally attracted to white men?" he asked complacently, though I could tell that he seemed a little uncomfortable.

"To be honest I'm not. But, I think it was more along the lines of I just wasn't really looking. I had my mind set to one person; I treated the rest of the world as though they were off limits. But, to tell you the complete truth," I said as I leaned close enough to the point where we were sharing breaths, "I've never felt this attracted to any man before. It's like you're the forbidden fruit," I said softly against his lips.

Licking his lips before he spoke, I could tell that he was fighting himself to keep composure. But if he'd had a condom, the look he gave me told me that he would've torn me apart right then and there. He reached up to touch my bottom lip softly.

"The feeling is mutual," he said seductively.

I smiled against his caress and closed my eyes as his lips replaced his finger. He was slow and passionate as his fingers roamed my scalp and tousled my silky locks. As the kiss grew deeper, I knew that we were in the danger zone. But so did Axel, and before the kiss lead us any further, he broke it off by placing his hands on either sides of my face.

"Jaida, do I need to go to the store?" he asked.

"Maybe," I said as I began to straddle his lap, "I'm finding it hard to resist you, Axel," I said before nibbling at his bottom lip.

"How about we go to lunch, and then we go to dinner, and then you come back with me to my hotel where I can taste that brown skin all night long," he said reaching up to smack my ass, shocking me at the intensity of the hit.

"Damn that felt good. If you keep that up I might not be able to last until dinner."

"Get dressed, I'll meet you back here after I change. I still have a wet spot that I walked all the way back from the restaurant with," he teased while standing up.

I sat back and admired every muscle as they rippled beneath his smooth skin. Something as simple as buttoning his jeans was so sexy as the action caused his biceps to bulge. I found myself missing his abs as he pulled his shirt down over his head to conceal them. A smile was on his face as he picked up his cardigan; he knew I was watching his every move.

"You're watching me like I'm a movie," he noted as he came over to plant a kiss on my lips.

"You're better," I said with a smile.

"Get dressed, I'll be back in fifteen," he said before running his fingers through my hair and disappearing out of the doorway.

I instantly felt a moment of glee that caused me to throw myself back on the bed with a squeal. The excitement was tenfold and I couldn't stop the raging feeling of lust as I replayed our little visit. I felt like I was in a teenage dream. This feeling isn't something that I have experienced in a long time.

As I collected my discarded clothes, I decided on my bathing suit and sheer cover up. Its design was dark blue and wrapped around my body perfectly. The contrast of my tribal print white and black bikini set it off seamlessly. My hair was swept back in a messy ponytail that sat on top of my head as I went to the door to find my sandals.

Just as I reached it, I heard a knock and a familiar voice. When I opened the door, it was Sonya with a pleased look on her face. No doubt she saw Axel leave the room, and looking at the sheepish grin on my face, she knew exactly what went down. Only she really didn't being that we hadn't done anything.

"So...how was it?" she asked as I let her in.

"We didn't go that far," I said as we took a seat in the living area of the suite.

"Oh sure you didn't, a man doesn't leave a room that happy if he hasn't sampled the goods, but that's ok, I won't pressure you into telling me anything," she said as I rolled my eyes with a smile.

"Whatever! How is Matthias?" I asked remembering his play date yesterday.

"Cute and fat," she said with a giggle.

"Can I see pictures?" I asked her.

"Of course," she said as she snatched her phone out of her back pocket and flipped through her photo gallery.

Matthias looked nothing like his father who was standing behind him in the picture. He was all Sonya. From the dirty blonde hair to the dark gray eyes. Maybe his father carried a little extra weight, that or Sonya kept in the gym. That was the only thing that I could say was anything like his father.

"Wow, what does he get from his father? He's all you," I said handing her back the phone. She grew silent for a moment, almost as if I had struck a nerve. Clearing her throat, she looked over at me with a sheepish look on her face.

"Nothing. That's not his father," she said with an ashamed look on her face.

"Oh, is that your brother?" I asked trying to figure it out.

"No, that is my Ex-husband. He and I split when Matthias was two."

I knew what she was telling me even though she didn't say it. Matthias didn't look anything like her husband because she'd had Matthias with another man. What made it click was the shame written all over her face. She'd conceived Matthias with another man _during_ their marriage.

"I know you probably think that I am a terrible woman. Who does things like this? I had a choice, but I chose wrong," she said somberly.

"Sonya..." I started but stopped. This woman had been so kind to me. From making sure that I made it back to my room alright, to stopping by to check on me, to fixing my hair up before my date with Axel.

Though what she did was wrong, I felt that I couldn't hold it against her. Here she was trying to live better and away from her past. I felt that I shouldn't judge her wrongly.

"Don't worry, though I've been cheated on myself, I don't see you any differently. You're still a good person," I said with my hand on her shoulder.

"He reminds me of it every time I drop off Matthias."

"Why do you drop him off to your ex-husband if that's not his son?" I asked confused at the whole setup.

"He loves that little boy with all his heart. Even after I told him the truth he still said that no matter what, that was his son. We have joint custody; I have him three days his father has him three days and on Thursday we alternate. Whoever's parent's house he slept at on a Wednesday, he slept with the other parent Thursday night," she said.

"Is that what you agreed on?" I asked thinking that was so unheard of.

"It is. I wanted to be fair because I had been unfaithful and tore our family apart."

The room was quiet for a few moments before a knock at the door alerted us of another presence. I knew that it was Axel, but I didn't want to let him in until Sonya felt comfortable. I placed my hand on hers and gave it a squeeze before she smiled.

"You have a great date, don't worry about me. Worry about that hunk outside your door," she said with a smile as she greeted him.

It was obvious that he wasn't expecting the receptionist and his expression of shocked confusion caused all three of us to laugh.

"Don't worry, you're at the right room. I was just leaving, you two have a wonderful evening, call me if you need anything. Hasta luego, see you soon." she said with a wave over her shoulder as she walked away.

# Chapter Eight

As I bit into my sandwich, I noticed that his eyes were on me. I tried to pretend that I didn't see him, but I couldn't; my smile gave me away like an alarm. He noticed, and reached across the table of the poolside cafe to pinch one of my cheeks. I playfully jerked and shielded my cheek away from any more teasing pinches. Straightening up and finishing the last bite of my sandwich, I washed it down with a few sips of my mimosa.

"What do you have in mind for dinner?" Axel asked before biting into his sandwich.

"I don't know; we'll leave that up to you," I said.

"How about you decide dinner tonight since I've chosen the last three outings including this one."

"True," I said taking another sip of my citrusy drink.

"You need another?" He asked noting my glass was almost empty.

"No, I think I'll stay sober. Besides it's hot out here, I need to stay hydrated," I said just before flagging down a concierge and ordering two glasses of water.

"That's smart; you know how to take of yourself, don't you," he commented while taking a sip of his water.

"Of course. Back at home I don't have enough time to do a lot of exercise, so I make sure that I don't eat too many sweets or load up on the fatty fried foods. Of course every now and then I slip up and stuff my face with Philly cheese steaks and fried chicken," I said licking my lips in reminiscence.

"I understand. These vacations are the only times where I completely let myself go. I swear if I lived in paradise like this and let someone else run the company, I would get fat."

"It would take years," I said remembering his incredible body.

"You'd never believe that I used to be the fat kid in school," he said as I grimace in disbelief.

"I'm serious."

"Pictures, or didn't happen," I challenged him. He laughed, accepted, and once again left me speechless at the photos he showed me on his phone.

"See?"

"Wow, yeah...that really did happen," he looked like a completely different person.

"Remember when I told you that I wanted to work for the government? Well the position that I wanted had a weight requirement; I didn't lose the weight until then."

"So you've been a little sausage all of your life! I mean, oh I'm sorry, that was really rude of me," I said apologetically as I felt the embarrassment begin to rise up the back of my neck.

"Don't worry sweetheart, my mom still calls me her little sausage," he said with a wink.

I found myself squirming in my chair. The sensations he was igniting in my body even though he was not physically touching made put me on this roller coaster of sexual tension. I needed release, and I knew only one man could do it for me.

"What time is it?" I asked, realizing that I didn't have a watch or my phone.

"Still too early for dinner," he said knowing exactly why I was curious about the time.

"We need to do something to distract us; something fun," I said.

"We could drive a few miles into Old San Juan if you wanted. I've been here before, so I know a few spots that we could hit. Or, we could stay on the resort; there are plenty of things to do and see here as well."

"Hmm, choices..." I said looking at the phone that he'd placed on the table.

We'd now been sitting here for about an hour at the poolside cafe. I'd already finished my food and drinks as well as Axel as the sun grew hotter on our backs. Just at that moment, I thought, maybe we could enjoy the spa together. The heat was raging and I could feel myself start to sweat and get uncomfortable.

"You know we could go to the spa; I know how women are with their facials."

"You are quickly becoming one of my favorite people," I told him.

Our day at the spa was like a dream. A dream that I'd been awake in for a little over an hour. We'd gotten couple massages and facials. I tried yet again to at least pay for half, but he refused. It would take me some time to get used to that, but I was starting to enjoy his refusals. It made me feel taken care of and special.

It was about five in the afternoon when we decided to take a trip into Old San Juan. The smells of the Caribbean cuisine, the feel of the sun against my skin, and the taste of the ice creams and candy that we tasted was a Spanish dream.

When we made it to the store, it was already six in the evening. Axel ran in while I waited outside. As I waited, I heard the sound of a Spanish guitar in the distance. When I turned my head to the right, I saw a beautiful woman clothed in a flowing dress that tickled the sidewalk as she swerved her hips to the rhythm. She twirled around so beautifully that I found myself mesmerized by the movement.

Several people came to watch, sing, and praise the woman in the floral dress. They praised her like she was their goddess. I turned around to look at Axel as he walked through the doors of the convenient store. The moment he drew close enough, I took his lips in a sensuous kiss. It was slow, but hungry as he responded in the way that I wanted.

When I pulled back, I could see that he wanted it just as bad as I did. I smiled as he returned one of his own, softly and only for a moment before he pulled back.

"How about that dinner?" he asked reaching around to cup my bottom in his large paw.

"How about it?" I responded with a smile.

# Chapter Nine

When we got to our seats, Axel, without fail, pulled out my chair for me. I ordered a juicy rib eye while Axel decided on a nice sirloin, both of us had our steaks prepared medium rare. I noticed that while we talked over dinner that we found we had a lot of similarities.

By the end of dinner, I felt like I was getting a better view of Axel. Like he'd shown me such a vulnerable part of him. He was telling me things about his past that he hadn't told anyone. I was relaxed at dinner, but as we started walking back towards his suite, I felt the jitters rising in my stomach and into my throat. In few more steps, I would be in Axels' arms.

When we made it to Axel's suite, I was in awe. This room had its _own_ room. In comparison to my suite, this was a palace. It was decorated in hunter greens and regal oak furnishings. The place was a castle, and I was about to dine with the king.

"Would you like some champagne?" he whispered as he came up behind me.

"S-sure," I said suddenly feeling nervous.

Earlier today I was ready to go like a bat out of hell. Now I wasn't intoxicated by lust; I was hit by reality. Ethan was my first, and Ethan had been my only for a long time. No other man had ever seen my body but him.

"Here you are," he said handing me a flute of champagne.

"Oh, thank you. So, this is what the master suite looks like, huh?" I said walking further in.

I walked past the formal dining room table, and further past the sitting area until I was standing in front of the balcony window. Though I had an incredible view of the resort before me, I could only see Axel as he slowly walked up behind me.

His finger touched the back of my arm very gently before his fingers were against my spine. They traced a small line of goose bumps down until they reached the apex of my bottom. There he slowly palmed a handful, causing me to suck in air at his audacious groping.

My head tilted to the right as I felt his kisses against my neck from the left.

My heart was pounding rhythmically in my chest as the tempo picked up. I felt his hand slide from my bottom to my mid-section before it slid up even further to palm my left breast. My jaw clenched from the intensity of pleasure as he began to toy with my pebble hard nipple through my dress.

I heard the sound of glass touching the floor as he stooped over, but only for a moment before I felt his hand slide up my arm and take my flute. He set it aside with the other before moving me away from the glasses. Still facing the glass, I felt his hands roam and explore my flesh as he began to nibble softly on my ear.

Both of his hands caressed the soft flesh of my busts as he began to work kisses down my neck before he reached my shoulder. I could feel his rigid length rubbing against me and I was happy I had that effect on him. I slowly gyrated my hips in a way that caused him to groan against my cheek as he pulled me into him. He turned me around and claimed my mouth in a possessive kiss.

His fingers found their way through my curls, gently, slowly, and passionately before he gripped a handful. His grip controlled the movement in my neck as his other hand began to undress me. I could tell this wasn't his first time because, within a matter of seconds, my dress was around my ankles.

He'd broken the kiss to stare at my deep chocolate skin in admiration. I could tell that he got high off of the contrast of our skin as his fingers met with the flesh of my stomach. It roamed to the valley between my breasts before reaching down further and further until they met with the lip of my panties.

I bit my lip as his finger dove deeper until his hand created a bulge in my underwear. The sensations caused goose bumps and waves of ecstasy as he began his work against my sex. My head began to lean back when I felt him direct my head forward as he made me watch. His dominance turned me on even further as I nearly released then and there.

He suddenly stopped, released my hair, and picked me up in such a fluid movement that I gasped. My arms around his neck, we kissed passionately all the way to his bed. He placed me down before standing up to undress himself. Licking my lips, I sat up on the bed to help him.

My fingers reached the small buttons of his shirt as he worked on his tie.

Each button seemed to take forever as all I craved was the delicious muscles that lay in wait underneath. When finally he released his tie, I popped the rest of the buttons open with one quick movement. I could almost hear the angels singing as he stood bare-chested in front of me.

I ogled him for a moment longer before reaching out to unbuckle his pants. They came down with ease along with his underwear, his member now stood out at full attention. I was impressed by his size, although it was thicker than I was used to, it looked incredibly attractive.

He pushed me back against the sheets as he climbed in on top of me. Tasting my flesh, caressing my skin and undressing me completely. As he threw my bra across the room, I felt his tongue dart out and swirl around my sensitive bud. I gasped in ecstasy as my back arched. He began to nibble softly, teasingly, and sensually as he massaged the other with his strong hand.

I moaned into his mouth as he came up to kiss me. It was long and a bit rough but incredibly pleasing at the same time. My panties were gone in a flash as his thick erection prodded my opening. I writhed against it, tempting it and inviting it as his hands gripped the flesh of my hips. He pulled away from me suddenly almost as if he had to force himself away.

"Almost forgot," he said reaching for protection.

I smiled at him as he ripped one from the box, but before he could open it, I reached up and took the square package in between my teeth. I kept eye contact as I adjusted on the bed. My knees were supporting my weight as I ripped the edge of the packet with my teeth. Sliding the slick condom from the packet, I tossed the trash aside before I slowly smoothed the rubber over his shaft.

The look in his eyes, as I leaned back on the bed, told me that I was about to experience something wild like I never had before. It was almost a challenge that I readily accepted as I opened my legs for him, inviting him as he crawled on top of me. My heart was thrumming, my breath was heavy, and my forehead was beaded with sweat as I readied myself for him. He looked into my eyes for a long moment before he slowly bent down to crash his lips against mine fervently and forever it seemed, until he stopped to look back into my eyes.

He wanted to watch me and see my expression as he slid into me. He placed his hands on either side of my head before he pushed inch by inch into my flesh. My eyes fluttered slightly as I began to chew on my bottom lip. The first few inches felt so good as they entered my body, I could hardly keep my eyes open.

He paused as he gave me time to adjust to his impressive girth before pulling out slightly only to drive deeper into me. He was causing an array of erotic passion as he reached down to smooth his hand against my bottom. I moaned with pleasure as he began to slide in and out, in and out, in and out as he kissed me passionately.

My nails were against his back as he continued to thrust into me. I felt myself digging deeper as he picked up his tempo. The sound of our hips smacking together filled the room almost as much as my moans of praise and delight. His eyes were on my face as I bit my lips in pleasure; my eyes rolled in the back of my head as his thrusting became even quicker.

"Look at me," he demanded softly, but dominantly.

I looked into his eyes as he instucted me, and then I nearly gasped when he flipped me up to straddle his lap. Holding my hips securely, he lifted me slightly before he began to thrust deeper into me. Faster and faster until I couldn't hold it any longer. My orgasm came in strong waves that made my muscles convulse and my arms buckle. I slammed down against his chest, but that didn't stop him from thrusting over and over until he too came to a powerful orgasm.

Two more strong thrusts, and he was done. Our bodies were drenched in sweat as our breaths came out at the same time in ragged rhythm. His arms were around my body as he gripped me tight against him; my arms did the same as I came down from my incredible climax. It was like a high I'd never been on before, like a roller coaster that reached heaven and back.

I had this feeling in my chest, like something close to euphoria. Hell, maybe it was. But I instantly realized this; no matter how many times, how great it was, or how new it was, I had never felt this with any other man than Axel. I lifted my head up lazily to look into his eyes. The moment I did, I got lost in them.

There I was, one day before my wedding, about to marry a man I had never felt this level of excitement with. I'd never felt this type of happiness with any other man on the planet. At that moment, I'd instantly forgiven and all but forgotten about Ethan. Ethan was nothing compared to this man, and if he hadn't called off our wedding, I would've never met Axel.

I didn't know how he was going to affect my future, but I knew that he could make me forget about my past.

### To be continued...

### Thank you for reading!

Please visit your favorite eBook retailer to view the next books in this series.
