[MUSIC: "8" by Billie Eilish Cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
*clap*
Hello my beans! Who is Gracie?
*silence*
Good question
I'm not really sure. Welcome or welcome back
to my channel. I actually started filming this
earlier but now all the footage is deleted,
gone, poof, goodbye. This was supposed to be
a get ready with me chat about stuff and I
already did half of the get ready-ing off
camera I guess but since it's unscripted I
think it's good I did a round one and now
we're doing a round two. I'd say a good keyword
to describe what I'm gonna be talking about
in this video is balance.
[MUSIC: "8" by Billie Eilish Cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
As someone who has
a decent size following online I have to be
very mindful about what I make public versus
what I keep private. I'm also very careful
with how I put things and because I am so
cautious I often look back at things that I posted
long ago and I'm like why did I say it like
that why didn't I say this instead and honestly
you just don't know what you don't know. For
example when I look at my Little Life series,
first of all I don't like that I called it
that because I don't call myself little anymore.
I look at that first video and I think of
all the things that I left out all the things that I know
how to explain better now. And it's not because
I was dishonest in that video. I've just developed
a better way of explaining things. Like girl
that video did not need to be twelve minutes
long you could've condensed it. You live and
you learn don't you. I have to be careful about
what it is that I condone and what it is that
I condemn. I need to be careful about how I
represent this community of sorts. And to be
honest that's quite terrifying. I don't want
to make people who experience regression in
its very negative forms to feel like that
they aren't welcome in this space with me.
And it's because of this negative regression,
we're just gonna call it that, I don't want
to paint regression as something that is completely
positive and happy and okay for everyone because
it's not. I don't want to exclude people who
choose to do it. I don't want to exclude people
who don't have a choice. I want all of you
to feel welcome here. And I think something
that might be hard for a lot of people to
accept- well both within and outside of the
community- is that both of these things can
be true. It can be a bad thing and a good thing.
And not even just from person to person. Even
within one person you can experience regression
in a positive and negative way. What irks me
is the people who take it to the extremes.
You have people who have regressed before
and they do regress and it's something that
they hate. Perhaps they can't fathom how it
could ever be a positive thing for other people.
And those people who have negative experiences
with it they may put others down. But it also
goes the other way too. I've seen people who
say no it's always a good thing, it's always
a positive thing, people who put down regression
are liars, or their opinions aren't valid or
whatever. Like that's no better it's really
not. I think both can be true. I don't even
know what I'm doing with my eye look today.
I'm just putting pink things on my face and
hoping for the best. What I ultimately try
to avoid is doing what I see a lot of anti-agere
people do which is the whole just slap some
therapy on and it'll all be okay. A lot of
the people who say go get help or go to therapy
I'm willing to bet that they've never actually
been to therapy. Just saying. Or at least their
knowledge is very limited. I don't think a
lot of them realize that therapy isn't going
to cure your mental illness. I mean I think
a lot of people could probably benefit from therapy
but a) doesn't work for everyone and b) not
everyone has the access to it. While I do recommend
that people go talk to a therapist or professional
about a lot of things I'm not going to belittle
and berate you if you can't. I do my best to
give advice where I can but ultimately that's
gonna be on you. Well, you and whatever mental
health professional that you work with.
[MUSIC: "8" by Billie Eilish Cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
I guess another thing I really need to balance is
the way that I convey my interests. Like I
know that there's a lot of people who admire
my aesthetic. Those are not the things that
make you an age regressor. Your interests, the
things that you enjoy, the things that you
like to wear, that's not what makes it what
it is. I'm really into J fashion, I'm into pastels
and kidcore and babycore outside of any kind
of regressing things that I do. I've just always
had a childlike personality.
[MUSIC: "8" by Billie Eilish Cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
Now I think I've
mentioned this a few times, but yes I do hope
that there comes a day when I don't involuntarily
regress as a symptom anymore. What I see commonly
is people really, really trying to get to that
destination. And they wanna see other people get
to that destination where they're finally cured
or completely fine again. And I mean I guess
it depends on the disorder, but for a lot of
people it's a lifelong journey, it's a lifelong
illness, and there isn't gonna be a day where
you just magically wake up and everything's
okay again. Even if you're not where you want
to be, you can still love and accept yourself
and still strive to be a better person and
I think a lot of people miss that. I get so
hard on myself sometimes about how far that
I've come and how much farther I want to be.
I think slowly as time goes on you start to just
think about certain things less and then one day
you kind of realize like huh I haven't thought
about that in a while. Ugh the eyeliner is
always the hardest part I hate it. In the same
way I need to balance the kind of content
that I put out there and the way that I word
things and what I represent and what I don't
represent, you as the individual need to find
balance in your own life. Oh the joys of having
two very different eye shapes. You guys are
smart though. I have no doubt that you will
figure things out on your own. I'm sure that you
can all handle yourselves perfectly fine; probably
better than I can.
I wanna draw clouds on my face
*laughs*
[MUSIC: "8" by Billie Eilish Cover (uke only) by whois.gracie]
I wonder what I should wear with this-
should I just wear this outfit? I dunno, I mean, here.
It's just some shorts and a tank top. I'm just
gonna go put on some cat ears and have a good night
*giggles* Please be kind to yourself and love
yourself every step of the way. You wanna make
sure you get to your destination in one piece.
Thanks for watching and I'll see you guys
next week. Patron time boop!
[MUSIC: "herbal tea" by Artificial.Music]
