

Sexiest Man Alive

By

M. Clarke

Sexiest Man Alive

Knight Fashion Magazine

Copyright © M. Clarke 2016

Smashwords Edition

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locations, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Smashwords Licensing Notes

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in articles and reviews.
Prologue

Nathan

Tonight is the night.

The night my whole life would change. It had only taken me a week to prepare, but I knew what I was doing—what I wanted. Most women plan their weddings as little girls. Most men delay them as long as they can—more like avoid them like the plague—but I had planned my proposal from the second I first saw her.

The proposal would be simple but romantic. My landlord gave me the idea for a perfect spot. I'd told her about my plans, and she suggested the roof. She didn't allow tenants up there, but made an exception for me.

I jerked. My phone vibrated in my pocket, so I took it out to check my texts.

Olivia: I'm coming up.

Me: You have to knock.

Olivia: Okay. We need to talk!

Me: OK.

Olivia: Why did you tell me to dress up? Why am I going to the roof?

Me: To save me. I'm locked out.

Olivia: Haha. Not funny.

Me: I guess you'll have to wait and see.

Olivia had to go ten flights up in the elevator and then take the stairs to the roof, so it would probably take her a couple of minutes, but those minutes seemed like a lifetime. I had been as calm as the night's soft breeze, but now my heart pounded out of my chest.

Thump! Thump!

I took a long, deep breath. How long had I been staring at the old, rusted metal door?

Thump!

I blinked and checked my back pocket for the small box. Opening the door just enough to slip out, I bolted through and then closed it behind me. I didn't want her to see what I had done just yet. I wanted this moment with her before I showed her my surprise.

"Nate." She giggled softly. "What are you doing?" Her eyes slid over my body. "You look ravishing in your gray suit. You know what you do to me when you wear one." She tugged my red necktie with her lips twisting and her eyes narrowing as if she were angry. "Locked out, are ya?"

I let out a short chuckle and held her close. Taking a whiff of her sweet, flowery scent, I slid my hand under her dress and up her soft thigh. "You smell so edible, Olie." I pressed my body tighter to hers. "You smell like you want to be fucked."

Another round of giggles tickled my ear. "Maybe I do." Her sultry, flirty tone sent wicked shivers through me.

"No peeking." I cupped a hand over her eyes, careful not to mess up her eye make-up.

"What are you doing?" She snorted.

"Shhhhh! Be still." I bit her earlobe playfully. After opening the door, I dropped my hand to my side. "Surprise! Happy one-year anniversary."

Olie fluttered her eyelashes. Frozen in place, she marveled at the decorations. Mini lights twisted around a couple of small trees and along the border of the brick walls. Glowing battery candles sparkled everywhere she turned.

"Oh, Nate, it's beautiful. I can't believe you went out of your way, but—" She glanced around. It wasn't over-the-top, but it looked romantic. Then a bemused expression replaced her soft smile. "Our anniversary isn't till Wednesday."

"I know. I wanted to surprise you." I entwined my fingers with hers. Guiding her to the table, I stared at her red silk dress that brought out her brown eyes. Under the night sky, her blonde hair flowing against the light wind mesmerized me, simply stunning.

Olie and I had met at the restaurant where I worked as a waiter. We had many things in common, but our career struggles bonded us. She wanted to be a model and I wanted to be an actor. We understood each other. We supported each other. She was everything to me. I never knew I could fall this fast and hard, but I had, and I wanted to embrace it and hold on to her forever.

"You're too good to me, Nate, but you really didn't need to do all this for me."

I helped her ease into her seat, and I got into mine. I pushed "play" on the playlist I had created on my phone of Ed Sheeran songs, her favorite. In front of us were plates of food covered in tinfoil. I'd had Chinese food delivered—Olie's favorite—just before she arrived. I had thought about asking my friends to be the waiters, but I wanted tonight to be just Olie and me.

"The dishes are not pretty, but—"

"It's perfect. It's more than perfect," she gushed. Her eyes were pooling with tears, sparkling against the glow of the candles.

A wave of pleasure seeped through me. Knowing she appreciated what I'd done so far meant the world to me. Another surprise for her rested inside my back pocket. We'd discussed marriage before, but agreed it would have to wait until later. I might have jumped a little ahead of schedule without her consent, but it was only a proposal—the declaration of my love for her. We didn't have to rush to the altar. Some couples waited several years to tie the knot after the engagement.

Olie placed her hand over mine as her smile disappeared. "Nathan, we need to talk."

I didn't like the sound of my name and her tone. I figured it had something to do with her waitressing job. She had mentioned how unhappy she was and how she wanted to look for another place of employment.

"Okay, but before we do, let me ask you a question." I'd planned on asking her after dinner while we were dancing, but my nerves got the best of me.

She nodded, pulling back her hair in the sudden gush of early fall wind. I took out the little black box with trembling fingers and sank to one knee. After I opened and revealed the one-carat diamond ring, I peered up to see Olie with her hands covering her mouth and tears in her eyes. I had wanted to give her a larger diamond, but I could only afford one carat. Hopefully, if my acting career kicked off, I could replace it with something bigger.

As my pulse skyrocketed and my forehead began to sweat, I said, "Olivia. We've been together for only a year, but you're the one. I knew the day I met you. I love your smile, your humor, and your genuine heart. You're everything I need and love. I promise to be the man you deserve, the man who will be by your side through the hardest parts of life, and I'll take the hard times and turn them into the best times of our life. Every day, the sun rises because of you. Every day, I'll love you more than I did the day before. Will you marry me?"

I waited for her answer with a nervous grin. Any second, she would blurt out the answer I wanted to hear. But...I began to worry when her eyes told me otherwise. They went from completely shocked to something I couldn't understand. Tears streamed down her face. That's a good sign, right? Olie cried when she was happy, but they didn't look like happy tears.

She shook her head. "No," she whispered softly. I wasn't sure if I'd heard her right until she spoke again. "I can't marry you, Nate."

I'd heard her wrong—surely I had. But when she turned away and sobbed into her palms, I understood. Standing, I placed the box back into my pocket and walked around to face her.

"I don't mean right now or tomorrow, or next week, or month. We can wait till we're both ready." I tried to find a reason behind her actions. Did I say something wrong?

She pulled back and wiped her tears. Her eyes were calculating, judging me. "You did this to keep me, didn't you?" She sounded angry.

The accusation stunned me. I furrowed my brow in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"You did this so I wouldn't take the modeling job in New York. You were afraid I would leave you."

"No, baby." I took a step and stopped when she backed away from me. "You've got it wrong."

How did I fuck this up? I had planned it all out: after dinner, we would dance with the downtown lights surrounding us. I would ask, and she would say yes. We would go back to my place, and I would make passionate love to her. But...

She folded her arms in front of her chest. "I've made my decision. I'm going to take the modeling job. They want me to start on Monday. I'm flying to New York tomorrow. This is what I wanted to talk to you about."

I narrowed my eyes at her. "But we already discussed this. I thought you were going to find a job here in Los Angeles. There are plenty of opportunities for you. We just have to be patient and let fate take its course, just like we talked about." I continued when she didn't say a word. "If you're moving to New York, then..." I looked away. I couldn't believe her words. Wringing a fistful of my hair between my fingers, I tilted my head up to the sky. The beautiful backdrop to this romantic dinner—stars and the golden full moon—suddenly became eyesores.

No. She wouldn't leave me. Sure, we had only been together for a year, but she meant the world to me. I didn't throw my heart on the line for just anyone, let alone allow it to get broken.

"Nate. Please understand. I've got nothing." Her tone begged me to understand. But how could I? She was fucking leaving me for good.

I stooped to her eye level. "You've got me, baby. Am I not enough?"

She dipped her head, avoiding my eyes. "I need this job. Please try to understand. This is a great opportunity for me. This job could make me big. I could help out my mom, too."

I felt like shit. If I had a better paying job I could have helped her mom financially. My temporary waiter job allowed me to be in this decent apartment, make the car payment, and save a little for rainy days, but that was about all. It sucked to be struggling to make ends meet. I understood every bit of it—every frustration and the need-to-save-a-penny part of it. But it killed me she had admitted I wasn't enough.

"Say something, Nate." Her tone softened. "I can't leave knowing you hate me. We can try the long-distance relationship. I—"

I cut her off with a wave and my jaw tightened. Anger rose inside, taking a hold of me. "You don't try a relationship. You're either all in or not. And you know damn well a long-distance relationship won't work."

I wouldn't be able to afford the flights to New York, and she would be busy, possibly traveling, too, if her career took off. I should have been happy for her, happy she had this great opportunity to work with the best agencies. But it fuckin' hurt too much. How can I let her go? How can I let my first love—the one I thought would be mine forever—go?

I winced when she touched my arm. "Nate." She sighed. It couldn't be easy for her, but I wasn't going to make it a piece of cake for her, either. Regardless of our conversation last week, she had changed her mind without talking it over with me. She'd already made up her mind to leave me. What was the point of discussing it with her?

I gave Olie my back. "Go. Leave. I wish you the best. Have a great life." Whether I sounded like a bastard, I didn't care. My heart shattered. Most of all, I couldn't believe she'd come to this conclusion on her own after we talked about our future together. Would I have tried to get her to change her mind? Yes. Would I have tried to work it out? Yes. Would I have still proposed to her? I didn't know anymore.

Perhaps, subconsciously, I had known what would happen. Perhaps she was right, and I'd only proposed to her to keep her there with me. It didn't matter anyhow. What was said was said. What was done was done.

When her heels clicked away from me, I thought of running after her and begging her to stay, but it was a great chance for her. Was it right for me to take it away? I screamed inside, uncertain. My thoughts were like a ping-pong match in my head. Do I or don't I?

When the door slammed, I knew I would never see her again. Letting her go was the right thing to do, yet the hardest thing to do. My heart ripped out of my chest as I dropped to my knees. Everything moved so fast, before I could register what was happening an agonized moan escaped from my mouth. Olie thinks I'm not good enough for her, my mind repeated. A piece of me died that night. A piece of me I could never get back because she took it with her.
Chapter One

A week later

Nathan

People say love can mend your soul, but me? It broke me. Changed me. I was in a dark place, and I didn't know how to get out. Olie had shattered my heart into tiny pieces and left them in the gutter washed away. Time moved slowly, and days dragged by without her.

My routine never changed: get my ass up, go to work, come home, turn on the TV, and go to bed. But I hardly slept. I wanted to burn the bed, throw out every damn piece of furniture she had touched—or anything that reminded me of her—but it wouldn't wipe away the memories of her. Recalling her sweet, honey-lavender scented shampoo, her body next to mine in bed— just knowing she wouldn't be walking to my apartment after work devastated me.

I'd stare at the door, hoping to wake up from my nightmare. But when the walls around me remained dead quiet and still, my broken heart told me it wasn't a dream. No more hearing her laughter filling the air, no more warmth pressed against my body, and no more staying up and watching our favorite TV shows. It hurt too much.

Part of me would always love her, even though I was so pissed off at her, but I knew this hard time would pass. It had to. I walked around like a zombie, dead inside. Every morning and night, her absence chilled the bed. The empty space next to me haunted me. It was as if I had made her up, an illusion appearing only in my dreams.

"Nathan, are you okay? You've been staring at the floor." Judy tapped me on the shoulder on her way to wait on a table.

Judy had been an angel on my shoulder ever since I began my job three years ago. With a ten-year age difference between us, she had been like a mother to me, always looking after me and giving good advice. She was one of the few who believed I would make it big. I would smile at her encouraging comments and wish they'd come true.

"Yeah," I muttered, snapping out of my thoughts of Olie. Putting on my professional face and a fake grin, I waited on a couple who had just been seated. After I took their order, I went back to the kitchen.

"Nathan." Judy tugged me out of view to the back corner. "What's wrong? You've been out of it for a week. I wasn't going to ask. I know it's not my business, but something happened between you and Olivia, didn't it?"

I stared. Her blonde hair reminded me of Olie. Her brown eyes reminded me of Olie. Her voice sounded like Olie. Everything and everyone was Olie. Fuck! My nose crinkled and my jaw tightened. I didn't want to break down in front of Judy. She was my friend, not my therapist, and didn't need to hear my problems. Even my college friends didn't know about our breakup. Nobody had known I planned to propose except for my family and my landlord. I had planned to ask Olie's mother beforehand for her blessing, but I ran out of time. Regardless, Olie's mother would have approved.

"Nathan." Judy shook me a little. "It's okay. I'm not going to lecture you. Just get it out of your system. It's the only way to move on. I know this." She looked down at her hands and then back up to me. "I was engaged before I met you, but my fiancé passed away from a fast-growing cancer. We didn't see it coming. You'll get through this, I promise. Just hold on."

My stare changed to something softer. Hearing the shit the amazing woman in front of me had gone through broke my heart. Judy was one of the kindest, most genuine and thoughtful people I'd ever met. Why did bad things happen to good people?

"I'm sorry, Judy," I said sincerely, resting my hands on her arms.

"It's okay, Nathan. I'm better. And what you're going through is your hard time, and I wasn't trying to downplay it. I wanted to let you know you'll be fine. How long has it been since the breakup?"

"A week," I answered.

"Yeah. It's still fresh. And I know she was your first true love. I'm not going to lie...you love your first love like no other. You give everything to your first love: your heart, your soul, your good and bad. And when you lose that love, it will drain you, suck the life out of you. It will hurt like hell. It will crush your heart, soul, and your spirit. But in the end, you'll be stronger, wiser, and unfortunately, more guarded. Your second love will have the best of you, but not all of you. I know this. I lived it."

"Thanks, Judy." Her words took a tiny bit of my ache away. Knowing she understood was enough.

Judy got on her tippy-toes and embraced me. "You're going to go places, kiddo. You're too handsome and smart to be here with us. I just know something is coming that will change your life. Everything happens at the right time. I hate to say it, but your breakup will lead you to greater things, to what fate has in store for you. You can't fight destiny. What's meant to be will be, no matter how hard you try to fight it or how hard you try to make it happen faster. Be patient."

"I hope so." I smiled when she let go.

"I'm not a fortune teller, but I can see it." She gave me a naughty, playful smile. "Now stop thinking about her and keep your mind on what is to come. Put your career first. No girls from now on." With that, she smacked my ass. "You're so hot, Nathan. If I were ten years younger, I would have you for dessert."

I would've taken offense to her comments if I didn't know her so well, but she was half teasing. But she was right. Something great would happen at the right time.

Olivia

Leaving Nate was the hardest thing I did in my entire life. Letting him go was torture. I was sure this was what hell felt like; I was living it. I had to make a choice: have a boyfriend who would maybe love me forever, or take a chance on a great career opportunity that would give me financial stability and help my mom in the process.

Yes, he proposed to me, but in my heart I believed he did so to ensure I would stay. Just because I left didn't mean I didn't love him. I ran out that night because if he'd asked me one more time to stay, I would have caved. But he didn't. It was unfair of me since he couldn't read my mind, but I believed in fate. If we were meant to be, then it would happen at the right time.

Nate and I were young. We were on the road to molding our careers. Acting and modeling jobs were unpredictable. We had long hours. We traveled. Everything about us was unstable. But I loved him. I truly loved him. He may never understand the reasons behind my leaving him, and I would have to live with it. Hell, I may never forgive myself, but either way, I had to try. Only someone like me, who'd had financial difficulties, could possibly understand why I made such a decision. And I was the type of woman who wanted her own money, her own career.

I never wanted to blame Nate for making me give up a promising career. Who knew, I might have resented him in the future. We would fight over it if I ended up being a waitress all my life. Not that being a waitress is a poor career choice, but I was raised to be more. I wanted more. So I chased my dreams.

My agent helped me get situated at a hotel, and even managed to have the modeling company pay my living expenses for a month. After my sessions, I also looked for apartments. It excited me, but the other half of me still hurt. I was torn between two worlds, but for my future's sake, I chose my career. Later, I might regret this decision, but I had to live with the consequences.
Chapter Two

A Year Later

Nathan

Tish Sawyer, my agent, swung her chair to face the front when I entered her office. Her wavy ebony hair fell on her face when she peered up at me, but her red lipstick stood out against her pale skin. Tucking her hair behind her ear, she said, "Have a seat." She was terse, but always positive and supportive, for as long as I'd known her.

Tish had come into the restaurant where I worked and asked me if I had ever considered modeling. My jaw dropped. When I told her I wanted to act, but would consider modeling, she almost fell off her chair with excitement. The following day, I signed up with T&T Modeling Agency, and the rest is history.

I pulled out the chair in front of her desk. "What's so urgent? You're not getting rid of me, are you?" I teased, but the question was serious. For nine months she had been unable to get me anything. I wouldn't have blamed her for breaking our contract or letting me know she would no longer represent me. I braced myself for bad news.

She pressed her red lips together and silently placed a paper and pen in front of me. Oh shit! This is it. She is going to let me go. Our contract stated we could part ways after a year with a sixty-day advance notice. This was my notice, but it hadn't been a year yet. Blood drained from my face, and my hammering heart eased. Picking up the pen, I scanned to the top and read the words "Contract" and Knight Fashion Magazine. I blinked and flashed my eyes to Tish, who now beamed.

"This...this is a contract?" I furrowed my brows in confusion.

"Yes. I didn't want to tell you over the phone." She leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs. "I sent your résumé and portfolio to Knight Fashion Magazine, and Mr. Knight's secretary called me to let me know he would like to sign you. Knight Fashion has created a men's clothing line called M. Knight. They need fresh, new models to represent their line. If you look below, you'll see your compensation is very generous. The contract is project based, but if all goes well, they will renew it. And also, this is a great opportunity for you to get in on their other projects."

"Wow." I released a pent-up breath and raked my hair back, "When do I start?"

"In two weeks. I've already gone over the contract and it's fantastic. You're getting a great offer. You finally got your break, Nathan. I told you it would happen. We just needed some time and patience. Your height and image are perfect. I knew the second I saw you."

I didn't have to think twice. Knight Fashion Magazine was one of the most prestigious magazines in the industry. To sign with them would be a dream come true. I just couldn't believe it was happening to me.

"Thanks, Tish. I don't know what to say." My tone remained calm, but I wanted to shout from the top of my lungs.

"No, thank you for signing with me. You were the only one they wanted from all of the models I represent. I'm compensated too you know." She winked. "I have more paperwork you need to fill out. It's just the employee information they require so they can pay you and set you up with insurance." She smiled immensely. "I'm so happy for you. You're going to the top, Nathan."

I smiled. My lips practically touched my eyes. Then, for some reason, thoughts of Olie invaded my mind. She would have been thrilled for me. If my big break had happened a year ago...I pushed the thoughts of her as far back as possible because even after a year, it still hurt like hell. I wondered again how she was doing. Did she even think about me?

"You're going to have to turn in your resignation and quit that waiting job you love so much!" she teased, trying to hide the smile she seemed desperate not to give me again.

"I'm not sure if I can handle it," I joked back. "That job means the world to me."

"It's where I met you, after all," she added.

And it was also where I'd met Olie.

"And by the way," she continued. "If you haven't already, I recommend you create a few social media sites. Name them 'Model Nathan Cross.' You're going to have tons of women following you. Just giving you a heads-up." She winked.

I had a Facebook account I used in high school, but ever since the break up, I stopped. "I have a personal one, but I'll create another profile." Releasing a sigh, still not believing what had just happened, I got up to shake Tish's hand.

"Congrats, Nathan."

I walked around her desk and hugged her. "I couldn't have done it without you." Her cheeks flushed. I might have made her weak in the knees because she stumbled back a little when I released her. People told me I had effect on women.

Two weeks later

Dressed in a fine, tailored navy suit, I walked across the polished white marble floor. Some people in stylish outfits passed me with appraising glances while others seemed to be in a rush to get where they needed to go.

I slid into the elevator just before it closed. Two gorgeous brunettes and a guy with a tattoo peeking out below his sleeve smiled at me. I smiled back and shifted to push the twenty-eighth floor, but the button glowed already. Standing there in silence as the elevator ascended, I began to feel uncomfortable, sensing their eyes on me.

With a soft ding, the door opened in front of a glass wall overlooking the city. The sun seeped through just enough to light up the floor with warmth, creating a friendly ambiance. And right smack in the middle of the silver desk were black 3-D letters that read Knight Fashion Magazine.

The three people behind me disappeared. The sound of footsteps to my right suggested they were employees, especially when the secretary looked straight at me and ignored them.

"Welcome. May I help you?" she asked, peering above her reading glasses. Her smile widened as she scanned me from head to toe. I pretended not to notice, but I knew she liked what she saw.

I searched for her nameplate and found it on the right corner of her desk. Mrs. Ross looked to be in her mid-forties, and she wore a friendly smile. Sporting a gray dress suit and with her hair tied back, she looked very professional. I said, "Hello, I'm here to see Mr. Knight."

"Which one?" she asked, still checking me out. Her lustful eyes roamed every inch of my six-foot-plus frame again like she wanted to have me for lunch.

Baffled, I rubbed the nape of my neck and pinched my brows together. "I'm not sure." I laughed nervously. When Tish had told me Mr. Knight wanted to sign me, I didn't think to ask which brother. I didn't think I needed to know. Wouldn't they have noted on their agenda which Knight brother was expecting me?

"Here," she said finally, turning away from the computer screen. "Looks like you're meeting Mr. Matthew Knight. Have a seat. I'll let him know you're here."

"Thanks."

I sat on the black leather sofa she'd pointed to, feeling the expensive plush of it. As I glanced around, I still couldn't believe I was there. Even after calling my family about my new job and with the signed contract, it felt like a dream.

"Nathan Cross."

That deep voice was certainly not Mrs. Ross's. I turned toward the sound and faced a man in a light gray suit. He was intimidating, not just his voice, but his overall persona. Sleek and refined, standing like he owned the world, he needed no introduction.

I stood up and grinned. "Mr. Knight." I gripped his firm hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Same here, Nathan. Follow me to my office."

As I walked beside him, I noted we were the same height. Passing by the human resources office, which he informed me I would be visiting after we had our talk, we proceeded to the end of the long hallway, stopping by any open doors—the customer service department, the sales department, and others. I was pleasantly surprised to find out he knew all his employees' names. My level of respect for him grew even more.

Matthew pushed through the double doors, and I thought we were entering his office. "This is our employees' lounge. You can eat here, take a short nap on your break, or stop by to grab some coffee. Whatever you need is here."

It was bigger than I had imagined. Two long sofas lined the far wall, and plenty of tables were situated around the room. Small appliances such as a microwave oven, coffeemaker, toaster, and so much more than I had seen anywhere else were set on the long, granite countertop. Even a massive refrigerator, the kind one would see in expensive homes, was there for the employees' use.

"Enough of the lounge. Most people go out to eat, but you're welcome to use it anytime."

"It's fantastic," I said, feeling stupid immediately afterward. I had no idea what to say. Fantastic? Not a bright word to an intelligent businessman.

I followed Mr. Knight out of the room and turned left. Just like at the front, there was a large, open space. The glass window took up the back wall, letting light through. A pretty girl at the desk looked straight at us, sitting tall. She must have heard the clicking sound of our shoes on the gleaming floor. That thing looked so clean I was afraid I would dirty it or make a mark with my shoes.

"Mr. Knight." She nodded with a smile, purposefully gathering her long, red hair to one side. My eyes focused on her slightly exposed breast, giving just enough to draw your mind to that place it shouldn't go.

"Helen, this is Nathan. He's just been hired. Nathan, this is Helen."

"Hi, Helen." I offered my hand.

"Hello, Nathan." Her grip was soft and steady. Her cheeks turned pink. I didn't know if it was because of Matthew or me, or both of us. Maybe she was simply shy.

"I'll be holding a meeting with Nathan. Please remind Mrs. Ward that Nathan will be stopping by her office in thirty minutes. He's already sent in most of the paperwork, but I need him to sign the workers' comp and a few other forms. Mrs. Ward sent me an email listing the details."

"Sure will, Mr. Knight." She smiled, then turned to her computer.

With that, we entered the double wooden doors that looked fit for a king.
Chapter Three

Nathan

I thought it would be one massive office, but instead, employees sat at their own desks partitioned off by modern-looking dividers. A group of them collaborated at a table at the far end of the room. Near the table, a large whiteboard covered the entire wall. Words crowded next to eight-by-ten photos of models dressed in what looked to be their winter line. Off to my right, a window overlooked downtown Los Angeles.

The sun rested on a sea of puffy clouds. It was a beautiful day, not that it mattered. It could have been hailing with a lightning storm, but to me, just being there made it perfect.

Everyone was so busy they hadn't heard the door open. I liked how engaged they were on a project. Matthew cleared his throat and the whole room instantly silenced. God, this man had some power. "Everyone, this is Nathan. An addition to our exclusive models for our M. Knight clothing line."

"Hi, Nathan. Welcome," everyone greeted me. One by one, they shook my hand and introduced themselves. I had already forgotten most of their names by the end.

"Hi, I'm Jenna," a pretty, brunette woman wearing a crimson silk dress said to me. The color brought out her brown hair and soft, brown eyes. She was the last one to approach me.

"Hi," I returned. This stunning woman looked too pretty to be stuck in an office.

I jerked when I felt a light tap on my shoulder, breaking me out of my daze. "Jenna is my sister-in-law. My brother's wife." Those words from Matthew meant hands off. I definitely heard it in his tone. Was I staring that hard? I had been noticing how her eyes reminded me of Olie's.

"Oh. It's nice to meet you." Jenna smiled. "Don't mind Matthew. He's overly protective of me. Anyway, I need to get back to work. I'm sure you two have things to talk about. If he gives you any problems, come find me. I'll put him straight." She jabbed Matthew lightly on the chest.

"Jenna thinks she's the boss. Sometimes she is." He winked at her and then turned to me. "Have a seat right there." He pointed to the first mahogany desk by the door.

With a grin and a nod to Jenna, I headed to Matthew's desk, pulled out a chair, and sat.

Matthew took off his suit jacket and hung it neatly behind his chair. After he sat down, he opened a file in front of him. He pulled out an eight-by-ten photo of me in a suit.

"Tell me a little bit about yourself."

I hate that question. Why does everyone ask me that question? I didn't know how much to share or where to begin. But I also understood the reason behind it. What did I have to lose? I had already been hired.

"I was born and raised in Kansas City, Missouri. I moved to Los Angeles and attended UCLA. I intended to become an actor, but my life took a turn one night. A modeling agent spotted me where I worked as a waiter. I thought I would try this route and see where life takes me."

Matthew nodded in understanding while he continued to scan my résumé on his desk. "What about your family?"

"My parents still live in the house where I grew up. I have a younger brother and a sister. My brother is in medical school and my sister is attending the University of Missouri."

Matthew closed my file. "How does your family feel about your modeling career?"

I took a quick peek at the family picture on his desk. "At first, they didn't like the idea of me moving to LA, but overall, they are very supportive."

Matthew flipped through more photos from the stack in his hands. "Well, sounds like you have a terrific family." He put them down and then looked back up at me. "You've been hired to model M. Knight, our men's clothing line, but how do you feel about doing other projects, like walking down the runway at our New York Fashion Week show? We'll be doing the shoot first, and then we would like our models to showcase the line on the runway. I know you don't have any runway experience, but I can get a coach for you. What do you think? I just want to make sure you're comfortable with this."

"I would love to," I said, trying not to sound overly excited.

Matthew leaned back in his chair with a grin. His elbows rested on the armchair and his fingers folded together. "Good. This would be a great opportunity for you to get out and meet other models. First things first...I'm going to introduce you to a few models I'm meeting with..." he looked at his watch, "in five minutes."

I stood up when Matthew pushed his chair out.

"I'll lead the way," he said, sliding his arms through his suit jacket. After he pushed in his chair, he headed for the door. He stopped just as he reached for the doorknob and turned. "Jenna, I'm taking Nathan to the meeting. I'll be back before lunch. Don't miss me too much."

Jenna shook her head and pointed at Matthew. "Nathan, keep an eye on him, will ya? Make sure he behaves."

I smiled at their playfulness. I was going to enjoy working there. Everyone seemed friendly and dedicated to their jobs. "I will, Jenna."

Matthew closed the door behind us after he gestured for me to walk out first, then turned left in the hallway. With the light beaming from the other end, Matthew looked like my guardian angel. In a way, he was. I was going to have an amazing adventure.

We walked into a large meeting room, where I saw about ten men already seated at the table. I recognized one who had been in the elevator with me earlier.

"Have a seat," Matthew said.

I took the empty seat next to the guy with the tattoo.

"Good morning, everyone," Matthew greeted, taking his seat. "I would like to introduce you to our last model with this special project. His name is Nathan Cross."

"Hello," everyone said with a smile.

"I'm Josh." The guy next to me extended his hand. His bluish-green eyes stood out against his dark hair.

The guy next to Josh offered his hand, too. "I'm Jax."

I shook their hands one at a time. "It's nice to meet you," I said to both of them. Though I'd never met Jax, I had heard of him and had seen him on billboards, modeling the top brands of jeans and even underwear. I couldn't believe I was going to work with him. The greeting was short and to the point, since Matthew started talking again. I gave him my full attention.

"This meeting is to give you some information, letting you know what's coming up. Tomorrow, you'll be receiving an email from my secretary. Let's face it, we're all busy, and you don't need to see my face every day. You already know what I look like."

Laughter rang softly in the air.

Matthew lightly tugged on his tie and continued. "We'll be doing some test shoots for our men's clothing catalog, starting a week from today. We're not ready to launch yet, but we're getting every detail prepared for that point in time. Then only a few of you will attend New York Fashion Week, and you'll get to see what it will be like for you in the future. By next year, we'll be showcasing our grand premiere on the runway."

Everyone smiled.

"Do you have any questions?" he asked, looking at his watch. The man was busy, but apparently he liked to be hands-on. It looked like today was the gathering of his special project models, and he wanted to see us together in the same room. Maybe to see if we were the right fit as a group.

"Just to be clear..." Matthew continued. "When you attend these fashion shows, or any other shows we send you to, you represent us. The company will pay for all your expenses, airline tickets, hotel, and even the cost of your meals, but you need to hold on to the receipts. However, we do not cover the cost of alcohol. Again, let me stress that you are representing us." He paused. "With that said, welcome to our M. Knight men's clothing line project. I'm looking forward to working with you."

Matthew pushed his chair back and stood up. "I'm sorry. I need to attend another meeting with Max." He focused on me. "Nathan, please stop by to see Mrs. Ward, the human resources director. Josh, could you please show Nathan to her office?"

"I sure will," Josh replied.

"Thank you." He paused. "By the way, Knight Fashion has Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram accounts. Please follow, and if you don't have accounts with these social media sites, I suggest you create some. We'll be hashtagging and mentioning your names. Posting on social media not only creates a buzz, but it will bring you personal attention. You want to get your name out there." Then Matthew was out the door.
Chapter Four

Nathan

Everyone was cordial and professional, especially Josh and Jax. They had done some shoots together and were already friends. When they invited me for lunch, I took their offer. Instead of driving, we walked a few blocks to a small shop called Café Express. We had arrived at the tail end of the lunch rush. After we ordered, we took the sandwiches, chips, and drinks and got a table toward the back.

I took a sip of my drink and unwrapped the paper on my roast beef sandwich. While I did that, I noticed Jax's ring on his left hand. "You're married?"

"Engaged," he said with a smile, and then took a bite of his turkey sandwich. His green eyes glowed. He had to be thinking of her at that moment. My eyes used to glow like that when I thought of Olie, but now they were just...there.

"Her name is Rachel." Josh waggled his brows. "She's one of the photographers at Knight Fashion."

"Is that how you met?" I asked, taking a bite of my sandwich. "This is really good," I added with a mouthful before Jax could answer my question.

"Good stuff. They have the best sandwiches in the world. I love their pastrami," Josh said, taking another bite of his. "And the answer to your question is no. Jax and Rachel met in Kauai."

Jax opened his bag of chips, shoved a couple into his mouth, and let out a soft snort. "Thanks, Josh, for answering for me."

Josh shrugged. "Sure, anytime."

Josh seemed to be the jovial type—the one who always joked and made his friends laugh. But at the same time, he didn't talk much about himself.

Jax eased back in his chair. "Josh forgot to throw in that I have a son, too. His name is Jace. His mother and I don't get along." He rolled his eyes.

That expression alone said they had not had a good marriage, assuming they had been married.

"But Rachel is amazing with him," Jax added.

"That's great." I swallowed. "I can imagine how difficult it must be not just to find the right woman, but also to find the right woman to love the child you didn't have together."

"Yeah." He nodded. "Rachel is wonderful. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect person for me. Anyway, enough about me. Are you seeing anyone?" He looked at my left hand. "You're not married, unless you took off your ring," he teased.

"No." I shook my head, though it saddened me I had almost been engaged. I wondered if we would have gotten married or just stayed engaged for a while. It had only been a year since we'd separated, but it seemed like a lifetime ago.

Josh slapped lightly across my shoulders. "Good. We can be single together." He chuckled. "Now I can finally have some fun. Jax is too boring for me. You see the table by the door? Those two hot ladies have been staring at us. I think we should stop by before we head back, don't you?"

"Sure," I said, though I didn't really mean it. It just shot out of my mouth before I could stop myself.

"The first one to get a phone number owes the other guy dinner," Josh said.

"You're on." I tilted my head to gesture I had accepted his challenge.

Jax arched his brows in amusement and ran his hand through his hair. "I'm so glad I'm not single." He shook his head and chuckled at the childish game we were about to play.

"So, I guess this means you don't have a girlfriend, Josh?" I asked hesitantly. I figured I was hitting a sore spot, but I asked anyway.

"Nope. It's been a while." He changed the subject to me. "So, where are you from? And how long have you been modeling?"

"I'm from Kansas City. I was born and raised there until I was eighteen and then moved to Los Angeles to attend UCLA. I was fortunate to be in the right place at the right time. A T&T modeling agent named Tish offered me a contract."

"We have a smart one," Josh joked. "You could have been a doctor, lawyer, or a stockbroker, but you gave in to the modeling industry."

I placed my drink down on the table after I took a gulp and answered. "Can't let this beautiful face go to waste," I joked, patting my face. "How about you, Josh?" I attempted one last time to get some information out of him.

Josh crumpled up his wrapper after he took the last bite of his sandwich and ripped open his bag of chips. "Not much to tell. I've lived in Santa Monica all my life. Unlike you, smarty-pants, I partied too hard and too often in college. My parents had connections and an agent offered me a contract. I've been doing projects here and there, but working for the Knights is living the dream. I hope their men's clothing line goes international." His eyes beamed with greed.

Jax looked at his watch and then back at us. "We should get back, but I do agree with Josh. It's going to be huge."

"I hope so," Josh muttered. He looked over his shoulder and winked at the ladies, who giggled. "Come, Nathan." He stood up. "We have an appointment to keep before Jax kicks us out. Unlike me, he likes to be back on time."

Not having asked a girl out since Olie left me, I suddenly lost my courage. I lost the playfulness I used to have. What the hell would I say? I didn't want to lead the girl on. I certainly wasn't going to ask her out on a date. And if I did get her number, which I knew I could, how would it make her feel if I never called? This game we were about to play didn't agree with me.

"Maybe next time," I said.

Josh stared at me with wide eyes, baffled. I understood. I had agreed then disagreed within a minute.

His expression eased. "Sure. We need to get going, anyway. Jax's punctuality is rubbing off on me."

I was glad he understood. There were moments when I had been so pissed off at Olie that I wanted to flirt with anyone who showed an interest in me. Working as a waiter, I had gotten a lot of propositions, but I couldn't go through with them. Even though she had left me, it felt like I would be cheating on her. How was that fair for me? Maybe she was dating someone right now. Maybe she had moved on the second she stepped foot in New York City.

When she walked out of my life, not only did she take a piece of me, she took away my desire to start a relationship with anyone. I knew it would take time to get over her; I just didn't think it would still hurt like hell. She was still with me...everywhere. Olie was my first thought when I woke up and my last thought when I went to bed. Even when I landed the contract, I thought of her. I wanted to call her. I wanted to celebrate with her. It pained me that I couldn't tell her I'd finally made it, not as an actor, but as a model, just like her. Now she would never know. She would still picture me as a struggling actor.

There were many times when I had picked up my phone to call her. I even got as far as touching her name on the contact list to dial, but the second I'd pushed it, I ended it. What was the point? If I'd called, I would have sounded desperate. And what the hell would I say?

Olie had drained me, left me empty, broken. She used to be the best of me, but now I thought she had become the worst of me.

After my first day, I went back to my apartment and crashed on the sofa. A few of my college friends had wanted to go out, but I'd told them I was too tired. But it wasn't the truth. I wanted some time to myself. I had been going out any chance I got to keep my mind off Olie, but as soon as I got home, I felt the same. I wanted to erase the memory of her. Sometimes it hurt too much, and sometimes I didn't give a damn. The pain came in waves. Sometimes it crept up, and other times it came crashing through.

I propped my head up on the pillow and spread my body along the length of the sofa, but I had to bend my knees since my legs would've hung over the end. Releasing a long sigh, I took my cell phone out of my back pocket and dialed my mom.

"Hello, Nathan." She sounded excited to hear me. "How are you?"

"Hi, Mom. I'm good. How are you?"

"Dad is sitting next to me. He says hello. We're watching a show."

"That's good. I thought I would call and let you know I started my new job at Knight Fashion."

"I'm so excited for you. How is it? Did you meet a...friend?" She cleared her throat, as if that action was a secret code.

Mom always asked about Olie when we dated, and I was waiting for her to drill me with questions, but so far they hadn't come. Olie and I had planned a trip to meet my parents, but it fell through. It took me a month after Olie left to finally tell them we had broken up.

"Friend?" I paused. "Are you trying to ask me if I have a girlfriend?" I chuckled.

"Well, a friend could be a girl," she answered.

I loved my mom, but sometimes she drove me nuts. She thought it wasn't good for me to be alone. And the fact she wanted grandchildren before she turned a certain age made her push the idea of marriage even more.

"No, Mom. But I met a few male model friends I'll be doing photo shoots with. We were at the same orientation."

Silence.

"Mom? Are you there?" I thought I had accidently hung up on her.

"Nathan..." I heard her swallow. "It's okay. I'll love you no matter what. Just tell me the truth."

What the heck? Did I do something stupid? "Mom?"

"Nathan...are you gay? Did breaking up with Olivia affect you so much it made you gay?"

Oh, lord! I smacked my forehead as I belted out a laugh. I could hear my dad saying something. "Yes, Mom. I'm gay. I've always been gay. Olivia was a fake girlfriend."

Silence.

I had been sure I sounded sarcastic, but maybe she hadn't caught it. Before she had a heart attack, I spoke again. "Mom, I was joking. I'm not gay. Just because I don't have a girlfriend at my age doesn't mean I'm gay. And I'm only twenty-four. I just haven't found the..."

I wanted to say, "I haven't found the one to replace Olie," but I couldn't. Because that's what it would feel like. If I dated someone right then, I would see only Olie, and hear Olie, and smell Olie, and it wouldn't be fair. People said your first true love was the hardest to get over. I would agree with that theory.

My mom let out a 'silly me' kind of laugh. "It's okay, Nathan. I know it's hard. I know you're hurting. And..." She stopped talking because she knew there was nothing to say.

"Mom, I'm fine. I'll date when I'm ready. Olivia and I are over."

"Okay. You'll call me soon?"

"Of course. I'll talk to you later."

"Good. I miss you."

"Miss you, too, Mom. Say hi to Dad for me. Bye."

After the phone conversation, I ate leftovers, took a shower, and lay in bed. Picking up the picture of Olie and me from my nightstand, I reminisced about the night a friend of mine had taken it.

Olie had worn a lavender dress, and I was in casual clothes—jeans and a nicely fitted T-shirt. One thing about Olie, she loved to dress up. Any excuse to doll up, she would use it to her advantage. We'd met some of my college friends that night at a nightclub, but it might as well have been just the two of us. We danced all night, kissed all night, and then we went to my place to make love all night.

I smiled as I traced the length of her hair in the photo with my thumb. Olie's hair always smelled sweet and felt like silk when I ran my fingers through it. I loved the way her hair fell seductively on her face in this photo. Her brown eyes reminded me of the time when we were happy. I could see how much she loved me in this photo. Where had it all gone wrong?

I knew I should put the picture away somewhere—inside my drawer or in the closet—but I couldn't. Maybe having it out gave me hope. Maybe 'cause I just couldn't let her go—yet. Funny how a picture can hold one's private thoughts and feelings. It somehow freezes the memories, and no matter how much time may have passed, simply looking at it brings back all the emotions as if they never left, were never forgotten.

I hadn't been the type to have my picture taken until I met Olie. How ironic—I used to shy away from cameras, but now, I gravitated toward them. Never in a million years would I have thought I would be a model. It had never even crossed my mind; that was Olie's dream and she was living it. I was happy for her, but it had somehow become my dream, too.

Putting the picture back in its place, I switched it for the newspaper and started to read the sports section. My eyes became heavy after a few minutes. I was tired, but I hadn't realized how exhausted I was until that moment. The last thing I remembered as I drifted off to sleep was my newspaper slipping from my hand. I didn't even hear the sound of it landing on the floor. I had already fallen asleep.

It had been a while since I'd dreamt of Olie, but I dreamed of her that night. We were on the sofa in my apartment. Sitting between my legs, she leaned back with me against the sofa arm while our legs stretched out to the other end. While I ran my fingers through her hair, she released a soft, seductive moan. It created a sensual desire in me. Then I dropped my hand lower and massaged her shoulders, and lower to her waist.

"You're too good to me, Nate." She flipped around.

We were face to face as her body rested on my chest. She smiled and sighed like a schoolgirl in love. After brushing back a strand of hair that had fallen in her face, I planted a soft kiss on her lips—the kind of kiss that would make her want more.

She didn't pull away. Instead, she gave me a seductive one right back. "I love everything about you," she mumbled, her lips touching mine as she spoke. "And I want to kiss every part of you and not miss a spot."

I loved when she teased me, and I especially loved it when our bodies molded together. She made my heart expand. She made me feel like I could fly.

"Olie, Olie, Olie," I repeated her name as if it was the melody of my favorite song. Her name was my favorite word. My lips made love to her name when I said it. She was everything to me.

When I pulled back, I already missed the scent of her. I should still be able to smell her sweet, flowery perfume, but it was fading because my mind told my heart this was only a dream. My mind told my heart I was hurting. My mind told my heart she thought I wasn't good enough for her. My dream faded back to reality, taking away my Olie, taking away this bit of happiness I wanted back so much. And as if we were back on the rooftop the night she left me, my heart died again.

I saw nothing but darkness. I felt nothing but emptiness. I heard nothing but stillness and my heart beating, skipping in irregular beats over a missing piece. The one Olie took.
Chapter Five

Olivia

"Beautiful," Troy said, taking shots of me through his mega camera. His long, dirty-blond bangs covered his eyes, and I wondered how much he could see through them. I struggled to focus on my mark when my eyes wanted to drift to his broad shoulders, the curves of his biceps, and his toned chest.

Oh my! I pondered how the other models handled this lustful heat. When I entered his studio, I was so stunned by his good looks it was difficult to look him in the eyes. I had smiled during the introduction, but tried to focus away from his face, unexpectedly feeling shy like never before. Only one other man had made me feel that way, but he was out of my life.

"You're doing good. Little bit to the left," he instructed.

I listened and did as he commanded. The shoot was for a designer jean ad, but the jeans were uncomfortably tight. And the four-inch black heels were killing my toes. The only comfortable item I wore was the T-shirt, which covered me like a second skin.

"Show me your beautiful teeth," Troy continued. "That's it. Doing great, Olie."

My lips, which had curled into a genuine smile, dropped to a thin line. I hadn't heard 'Olie' in a long time. It threw me for a loop. No one ever called me by that name except for Nate. And though we were no longer together, I didn't want to hear it. The hole in my heart I had tried to mend opened back up with that name—that special name only Nate had called me. It drilled a fresh hole in my heart.

"Do you need a rest?" Troy asked sweetly. I didn't see him next to me until I felt his hand on my shoulder. Had I zoned out to the point I hadn't seen him coming toward me?

I peered up to see the most beautiful green eyes. Those eyes calmed me, soothed me. Inhaling a deep breath, I smiled to let him know everything was fine.

"I won't call you Olie again. You frowned at me when I called you that. It sounds ridiculous, anyway. Olivia sounds much prettier." He chuckled lightly and never called me Olie again.

I smiled again and wrung a strand of my hair behind my ear. Oh God, am I acting all shy or flirting, sort of? Having been single for a while, I had forgotten what I was supposed to do or how to act in front of someone I felt attracted to. "Sorry."

"For what, sweetheart? You're fine. The only thing you should be sorry about is stealing my heart." He winked.

That was a pickup line. Though I would have normally rolled my eyes at him, hearing it from him sounded nice, like he'd meant it. My eyes flashed to my heels with a nervous grin. "I'm sure your heart is still there, beating." I didn't know why on earth I had said that, and I sure as hell didn't know why I had placed my hand on his chest, but I had. Troy's hand covered mine before I could drop it and he kept my hand. His heart beat faster the longer it stayed there, until it was thumping as fast as mine. "Sorry. I think that was unprofessional of me."

His other hand caressed my cheek, making me shudder. "It's fine. You don't need to apologize, but I think I should." He took a step closer until I could feel the warmth of his body, and he wasn't even touching me.

"Why do you need to feel sorry?" I whispered. His eyes narrowed in on my lips.

"Because. I want to kiss those lips." His lips inched closer, almost touching...so close.

Oh God! I didn't know what to do. I wanted him to kiss me, but at the same time, I didn't know if it was professional of me, or him, or whatever. "Oh," I said breathily, feeling like a dork. It was all I could say. My brain refused to function when all I could think about was his lips on mine.

"But..." He pulled back slowly. "I'm sorry, I can't. At least not here."

He walked away as if whatever had happened between us hadn't. In a way, I felt like a fool. What the hell? He picked up his camera and took more pictures of me, and I was sure my expression said "just been dumped." I recovered by trying to remember how I had been posing, and at the same time attempting to wipe away the embarrassment and redness in my face.

Click! Click! Click!

"What are you doing tomorrow for dinner?" he asked out of the blue.

His question surprised me. I even rewarded him with a smile.

"There it is. There's that gorgeous smile." He noticed the change in my expression and body language. "Put your hands on the chair and bend like you're bowing so your ass is slightly sticking out."

My dirty mind jumped beyond what he told me to do. His deep, manly voice and the way he'd said those words, so dominant, sent instantaneous sexual excitement through me. Wow! Why am I having these feelings? Not having sex in a long while, maybe.

When I followed his instructions, he got excited. "That's it. It's perfect. You're perfect." He still clicked away, and I hadn't answered his question about tomorrow night. But did he want me to? I didn't know if he was serious, but a part of me hoped so.

Troy moved to the side and bent down to his knees, getting a different angle of me and clicking away. "You didn't answer my question, Olivia."

I raised my leg, swung the chair around in one swift motion, and sat on it backward, surprising him. His grin behind the camera told me he liked what I had done. Taking a risk, I moved my arms and legs into a sexier position.

"I like that," he said, coming closer to me, clicking away as if the camera was on automatic shoot. "You're a natural. I knew you were something special the second I saw you. I want to know that part of you better."

He just melted me with his words and my courage came back full force. "About tomorrow night..." I paused because I wasn't sure what I wanted to say. Oh, what the hell? "The answer is yes."

I dropped my purse on the dining table and knocked on Isla's bedroom door. "Isla, are you in there?"

The door swung open. "Where's the fire, Olivia? Everything okay?"

Isla ran her fingers through her auburn hair, eyes heavy with sleep. She had beautiful hair, full and thick with loose curls. The color brought out the green in her eyes. She was tall and gorgeous, good qualities for a model. My hair, on the other hand, was straight as a board. It never curled like hers.

She had just woken up from a nap, or maybe more like I had woken her up from a nap. I broke my stare away from her face. "I'm sorry. Were you sleeping?" She hadn't changed from this morning's attire—jeans and a T-shirt.

"I was, but now I'm not. I needed to wake up, anyway." Though she said it nicely, I felt bad. It was already six. I justified it by thinking if she had slept any later, she wouldn't have been able to sleep at night. Her schedule would have gotten messed up. But her schedule always did when she wasn't working. She would stay up late watching TV and then get up in the afternoon.

"Oh, sorry," I said. "Want to go back to sleep? I'll catch you later."

Isla stretched her long body while her hands reached for the ceiling, and then she opened her mouth to yawn. She rested her hands on the doorframe. "No. What's up?"

"Guess who asked me out?" I sounded like a teenager. Before she answered, I strolled to the kitchen to grab a water bottle from the counter.

When I turned, Isla's face was practically touching mine. She had trailed right behind my ass. "You can't just ask me that question and walk away, Olivia." Though she tried to sound upset, she wore a huge smile. "So who's the lucky guy?"

I opened the water bottle and took a few long gulps. Meanwhile, Isla tapped her feet with her arms crossed.

"Want to hurry up a bit? You're killing me here. This is your first date since we've been roommates, so this is a big deal to me. And you." She giggled. "So who is he?"

I bit my bottom lip.

"Well? Olivia?" Her tone reached another pitch.

"I can't believe he asked me out!"

"Who?" She waved her hands with her palms up, like she was fanning something in the air.

"Troy McIntosh." His name came out of me in a whisper.

"Did you say Troy McIntosh, as in the hottest, in-high-demand, famous photographer? Did I mention hottest guy?" Isla grabbed the counter to hold herself steady. "So...he asked you out?" She nodded, seeming calm, and then all of a sudden like a broken faucet, she let out her scream and wiggled like she was doing the dance workout move I'd seen her do in front of the TV.

"Yes, yes, yes!" I sort of moved like her, but it felt awkward. I was excited, but a part of me was filled with guilt.

"So when's the date?" she asked, finally calming down.

"Tomorrow. Want to meet him?" I took another sip of my water.

Isla leaned against the counter. "Hell yes." She must have seen some kind of expression on my face I didn't know I made. Tilting her head sideways, she asked me for an explanation. She rubbed my arm. "Hey, you okay?" She paused, seemingly lost in her thoughts for a second. "Does this have anything to do with your ex?" When I didn't say anything and shifted my eyes to the floor, she continued. "It's just a date, Olivia. See what happens. It's not like you're getting married. And besides, your ex is probably dating someone else. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but you have to move on. Life moves on. He's probably moved on. You should too."

"Okay." I nodded, thanking her silently for being such a good friend. I didn't know what I would have done if I hadn't met her. Because of her, I had a roommate. Because of her, I felt a sense of belonging in a new career and a new place. Because of her, I let Nate go.

Isla knew I had broken up with a boyfriend before I moved to New York, but she didn't know his name or anything about him. She never asked for more details, and I didn't want to share. Frankly, I didn't know if I could. It hurt too much to tell her leaving him was the hardest decision of my life.

"Want to go out for dinner?" I asked.

Isla pulled her lips into a warm smile, the kind of smile that said she would be here for me. "Sure, but let me get decent first." She draped her arm around my shoulders, taking us out of the kitchen. "Troy McIntosh. I'm so jealous," she crooned.
Chapter Six

Olivia

After dinner, Isla and I watched some TV, and while she planned to stay up late, I called it a night. I was exhausted after a full day of shooting, not just with Troy, but with another photographer before Troy for a different ad.

I made enough to support myself financially and send some money home monthly to my mom so she didn't have to worry so much. One day, I would make enough to buy her the home she'd always dreamt of and a new car. Hearing my cell buzz, I turned on the lamp and picked it up.

"Hi, Mom."

"Hello, sweetheart. How are you?" It never failed. Mom always spoke to me as if I were still a child, especially over the phone.

"Fine. How are you?" I replied.

"Good. Everything is fine. I just want to thank you for the money you sent." She sounded grateful. I knew a part of her felt guilty and embarrassed, but I tried to play if off like it was no big deal so she wouldn't feel so bad.

"Mom, you're welcome. You don't need to thank me."

She sighed. My mom had been a teen mom, and she'd never had the chance to go to college. My deadbeat dad, who left us when I was five years old, had never paid alimony or child support so she held two jobs. Not only did she work long hours as a cashier at a grocery store, Mom also cleaned houses after hours. We had struggled financially all my life, living paycheck to paycheck. The first thing I did once money started coming in was make her quit her second job.

I'd sworn to myself I would never get trapped. Not only would I make sure I wasn't a teen mom, I would never depend on a man for money. Having a career and being able to take care of myself monetarily meant the world to me—my number one priority, besides looking after my mom.

While I attended local city college, I waited tables. The money wasn't bad, but it wasn't enough. I had been lucky to find an agent when I auditioned for a local scout. One thing led to another, and before I could blink, the agent offered me a contract and very soon after, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to work with the best in New York. The only problem? I had fallen in love.

Nate was my dream boyfriend. Every beautiful part of his mind and soul fit my ideal man. I just didn't expect to meet him so early in my life. In the life I had planned out, having a boyfriend would happen after I was settled in my career. He was the right man at the wrong time. Though I loved him, the idea of needing to take care of myself outweighed my other priorities. I might regret the decision, but I could do nothing about it once I was gone.

"Have you spoken to Nathan?" She sounded hesitant. She knew it was a sore topic for me, but she asked anyway.

"No. He didn't call me," I said flatly, pretending it didn't bother me.

"You have to remember you left him. If anything, you need to make the phone call first. I know your career is important, but sometimes you need to put love first or you won't have anyone to love. Life is too short. I hope you're not sulking around your apartment all by yourself."

Mom wasn't against my decision to move to New York, but she worried about Nate's feelings. My mom loved Nate. I didn't just leave Nate behind; I left my mom, as well.

"I'm okay," I lied, but I actually thought about him every day. I thought about how much I had hurt him...and us, but I justified being selfish. I needed to think about my career and my mom. Wanting to cheer us up, I changed the subject. "I have a date tomorrow."

"You do?" She sounded excited. "That's great." Then she rolled in with her questions, "Who is he? What does he do? How well do you know him? How old is—?"

"Mom," I stopped her. "I'll tell you all about it later. I need to go, okay?"

"Sure, sweetheart. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, Mom. Love you."

"Love you, too."

After I hung up with Mom, I reached over to my nightstand to put my phone down and almost knocked over a picture frame. I picked it up and stared at the photo of Nate and me. One of his college friends had taken this picture of us when we met with a bunch of them at a nightclub. I'd had a copy printed and framed for him as part of his birthday present. I'd also made a copy for myself. Since Nate and I were over, I shouldn't even have it out, but I couldn't put it away. It would mean I had let him go permanently. And I wasn't sure if I could do that just yet.

I remembered the night we had taken this picture as if it happened yesterday. We danced all night, kissed all night, and I remembered the way he had made love to me all night. I felt his arms around me, the way his stubble coarsely but pleasantly rubbed against my skin. Smelled his scent. We had been so happy and so much in love. But I needed more at that time in my life. If I'd met him later on, things would have been different. If fate brought us together again, would we have a chance?

I rubbed my thumb over the glass as if touching Nate. He had beautiful hazel eyes, and I envied his eyelashes. I used to give him my version of butterfly kisses on his eyelashes with my lips, and then I would roam light as a feather all over his face and down his body. He would moan as I teased him. And when he couldn't take it anymore, we would switch places. He would tease me back just as much, if not more.

I placed the photo on my chest as if I could somehow hold him. My eyes and my heart heavy, I drifted off to sleep thinking of Nate.

Isla's eyes roamed my body, checking out my red dress. "You look fabulous. It's not too showy, but just enough. I think I want to date you," she teased, pulling her hair back into a ponytail.

"You don't think this is too much? I mean, I have no idea where we're going." I looked down at my black heels. What if we had to do a lot of walking? "I should have asked him, I guess." I did have his number. We had exchanged numbers yesterday when I texted him my address. Oh God! What if he doesn't show up? He hadn't confirmed through text or even let me know where we would go.

Isla kicked her feet up onto the coffee table after plopping down on the sofa. "I think it's perfect. I'm sure he'll be taking you out for a nice dinner."

I sat down next to her and squinted in confusion. "Don't you have a date tonight?"

"Not a date. Just a reunion with some of the model friends I did a shoot with in Paris. They're here for a week. Besides, I need to meet Troy. If there is anyone you should know in this industry, it's him. He can get you jobs. Well..." She shrugged. "That's what I've heard. I've also heard he's got a temper, but who doesn't? I would have a temper if I had a crowd of models pestering me, too."

I nodded in agreement, and then I felt my heart pounding in my chest when the door chimed. Isla and I flashed our eyes at each other. We froze for a second.

"I'll get the door." She stood up and headed for the door. "Stand right there so he can't see you." She pointed between the hallway and the kitchen.

"Okay," I agreed.

The door creaked open.

"Hello. Troy, right?" Isla tried to sound casual, but excitement crept into her tone. "I'm Isla, Olivia's roommate and model friend." She had to throw the word 'model' in there. I shook my head and giggled softly to myself. "It's nice to meet you. Come in."

"It's nice to meet you, too." Troy's voice sent a tremor through me. He had a nice, pleasant tone. My heart beat faster as his footsteps moved closer.

"Olivia, Troy is here." I heard Isla's voice loud and clear.

I stepped out of the kitchen so he could see me. "Hi, Troy. You made it." Oh, lame! Of course he made it. I wanted a do-over.

"Olivia," he said with a nod. Then his eyes took in every inch of my body. It got way too hot in there. My cheeks burned red 'cause I felt that lustful stare all the way down to my sex.

"Troy," I answered back, not really knowing why I just said his name again.

Meanwhile, Isla gawked back and forth from the corner of her eye. What was she thinking?

"Ready?" He didn't wait for me to answer. Instead, he placed his arm around my waist and led me out the door.

I was glad he had; my legs were shaky and didn't want to move. Suddenly, I got nervous. It hit me I was going on a date with a famous photographer. I wasn't sure if this was a good or bad thing. Would it affect my career if we were dating and things went wrong? Oh hell, I always thought of my career. Like my mom said, I needed to put love first at this stage of my life.

It was just one date—no promise beyond that.

When we arrived at the fancy restaurant on the top floor, the view of the city blew me away. The colorful lights lit up the night with an enchanting ambiance. In a way, it reminded me of the night when Nate and I were on his apartment's rooftop. The hostess took us to our seats and Troy ordered a bottle of wine for us.

"It's beautiful," I said, forcing myself to brush away the thoughts of Nate.

"It's not as beautiful as you." He winked.

I gave him a smile and opened my menu. The waitress brought our wine and poured it into our glasses. After we had ordered, I stared at my plate; all I saw was Nate. I felt guilty, like I was cheating on Nate. We broke up, I reminded myself. He's probably dating other girls. He probably has a girlfriend. And that thought broke me. Sometimes when you hurt, you push it away and try to avoid it, try to find something to replace it. And right then and there I decided to move on with my life.

I sat up tall, inhaled a deep breath, and became a new me. "So, how long have you been a photographer?" I asked.

Troy slowly curled his lips and his eyes sparkled like the city lights. He must have seen the switch in my level of confidence, away from the previously shy and insecure me. "Ten years," he said.

"Ten years? Wow? That's—"

"Old?" he intervened, chuckling.

"No," I said, a bit louder than I had intended, and took a gulp of my wine. "I was going to say amazing."

After some time passed, the waitress came by, placed our plates in front of us, and then left. During the interruption, I calmed the redness in my face. What is wrong with me?

Troy's hair fell into his eyes when he looked down to cut his steak. When he brushed his hair away, I saw a tattoo I hadn't noticed before peeking out from under the sleeve of his short-sleeved shirt.

"I need to take more pictures of you. Some at the beach and some back in my studio. Also, maybe semi-nude if you feel comfortable. I promise to make you look sexier than you already are," he said.

The alcohol fired me up. Every nerve in my body felt his words, especially the semi-nude part. Surely, this could help my career, possibly? "Sure. When do we start?"

"Whenever you're ready. But first I want to know everything about you."

Those words magically lifted the curtain I had drawn between us. "Did you always live in New York?" I asked.

"I did. Born and raised." He nodded. "And you, Olivia, were you born and raised in Los Angeles?"

My eyes fluttered in surprise.

"I did my research," he continued. "I don't mean to sound like a stalker, but I like to know who I'm taking to dinner."

"I understand."

I began to relax more. As we laughed and talked through dinner, I found out Troy was an only child. He had known he wanted to be a photographer since high school. Taking pictures was the love of his life, and he felt blessed to work in the field he had found a passion for.

After dinner, we strolled around the building, admiring the city lights. Then he took me back to my place and walked me to my door. I had my key ready, but he placed his hand out to prevent me from opening it.

"I had a great time," he said, resting his hands on my shoulders.

I smiled and admired his strong features—the curve of his jaw, his defined nose that was perfect for his face, and his sparkling eyes that claimed me. "I did too. It was very...nice." Nice? Did I seriously just say nice?

"Nice?" Troy tried to look disappointed, but grinned instead. "I think I need to do better than nice. How about I get a chance to make it up to you?"

My cheeks warmed at the thought of Troy wanting to see me again. "Sure. I think I'll let you make it better than nice."

Troy imprisoned me in the bubble of his arms as my back rested on the door. "I'm being a gentleman tonight. The next time, it won't be nice, Olivia." He leaned closer to my ear so only I could hear. "It's going to be fuckin' amazing. Only if you let me in." His words came out hot and heavy against my ear. My body quivered with lust and I wanted to kiss him right then and there, but I melted into a puddle, unable to move. No sex in so long had me all hot and bothered.

"Sure." I thought that was what I said. "I'll let you in," I wanted to say, but my mouth wouldn't form the words.

"Meanwhile, I'll give you something to think about."

Just as I wondered what he meant, his lips devoured mine, short and quick, but holy hell—it sent crazy, erotic tingles racing through me. I wanted more. My eyes were still closed as my body levitated off the ground.

"Goodnight, Ooolllivia," he teased. Before I knew what happened, he had taken the key out of my hand, guided me inside, placed the key back into my hand, and closed the door.

What just happened?
Chapter Seven

Three months later

Nathan

Check out our newest model at #KnightFashion @ModelNathanCross splashed across the Knight Fashion Magazine social media sites.

My sites were buzzing with more likes and posts, mostly women but some men. Some were requests to go on dates, and some were even proposals. I had to laugh at those, but I loved all the attention. I wondered if Olie had a model account, too. She probably had one, but my fingers wouldn't type in her name.

Matthew was right; after the initial buzz from the Knight Fashion social media sites, mine had taken off. My followers were in the hundreds when I first created my model account, and now I had five-digit numbers. I had become an overnight celebrity.

The previous three months had been amazing. Some days we would shoot long hours, but I had no complaints. I was living my unexpected dream. Fate sometimes turns you in a direction you never intended to go.

I still couldn't believe I worked for Knight Fashion. We were finished with the summer line photos, which were merely for test shooting, and I even went to New York Fashion Week. They had hooked me up with one of their best trainers since I'd never walked down the catwalk before. I spent countless hours on and off the catwalk with a few other models.

M. Knight would be launching next year's spring and summer clothing line for men. The fashion industry stayed a couple of months ahead. Instead of shooting at the Knight Fashion studio, we had been instructed to go to another studio nearby.

"Josh, Jax." I entered the studio and found them seated at the front of a mini living room with sofas and chairs. Large, framed pictures of models hung around the room. A white desk with no one behind it sat in the corner.

"Hey, Nathan," they both said. We shook hands and sat back down.

I sat across from them as I marveled at the clean, white furniture. Everything about this place exuded an ambiance of comfort.

"Is it just us?" I asked.

"Yup," Josh replied, leaning back into the sofa and pulling his legs up to cross them. "Just the three of us. The others are coming later. Did you get the memo?"

"Yeah, just checking," I said. "Who are we waiting for?"

Josh rolled his eyes. "The photographer. He's kind of late." He looked down at his watch.

"He is not late. And he is a she."

The three of us whipped around at the sound of a female voice to see a person standing next to the desk. Something happened to me as I admired her womanly figure and took in her seductive voice. Her sweet, innocent face—the kind of face you would imagine on a Victoria's Secret angel—threw me into a spiral of emotions. And may I add—what a fine body she had.

A few seconds passed in dead silence as the three of us stared at her. The quiet broke when Jax cleared his throat and stood up first.

"Sorry, we thought we were waiting for Brad," Jax said.

She smiled and her cheeks flushed a little pink. Damn, her smile was killing me, and I didn't even know her name.

"I'm Kelly," she said, as if she'd just read my mind.

Kelly strutted toward us. I watched her hips sway in the skinny jeans hugging her petite body as she extended her hand to us. When she shook my hand, our eyes locked a bit longer than everyone else's did, and I might have held it a lot longer than the others had.

"I'm Nathan," I said, staring at her stunning blue eyes that reminded me of the sky.

"Hi, I'm Kelly." Her face flushed even more the longer I held her hand.

"Yes, I know. Kelly. That's a nice name." I'm such a dork.

She dipped her head a little bit, causing her brunette hair to cascade slightly over her eyes.

Instinctively, I lifted my hand, still holding hers, and brushed the strand away from her eyes. I wanted to see them. I wanted to see her look at me with curiosity and lust, but in a very innocent way. I didn't look for this. I didn't want it, but for the first time, I wasn't thinking of Olie. There was no guilt. There was no sadness. Just...me.

Kelly and I broke away from whatever was happening between us when Jax cleared his throat. She stiffened a little and turned her back to me.

"Follow me, please," she said, leading us to another room. Just then, another woman appeared, walking toward us. "Oh, this is my administrative assistant, Francis. She was in the back room."

"Hello," Francis said quickly with a smile, and headed to the front.

The room was already set up for a shoot with a white backdrop. Kelly pointed to a table. "Your wardrobe is on the table with your name card on top. Please find your attire and get changed behind the divider, unless you prefer to change in front of me. I promise I won't compare." She winked.

We chuckled lightly. I thought I'd just fallen in love with her. After we had changed into shorts and polo tops, we settled in the sitting area.

"I'm going to shoot individually and then I'll do the group." Before anyone had a chance to respond, she called my name. "Nathan, you're up first."

I didn't know why, but I felt nervous, and I'd had plenty of photographers take my picture. They say to get over nervousness, you pretend the person or the audience is naked. My imagination got the best of me and...not working. My dirty mind was doing all sorts of things to Kelly, and I loved it. I had just met her and I was already acting like an idiot, stumbling over the stool that appeared out of nowhere, and almost falling flat on my face.

"Nathan, are you okay?" Kelly reached down to me and slipped. She landed on her hands and knees, her body slightly tilted. If my friends weren't there, I could have found a way to move a little bit more sideways and fall on her.

"I'm fine. I didn't see the stool," I said, but I certainly saw the cleavage her V-neck T-shirt decided to expose. To rectify the embarrassing situation, I stood up to help her, but she pushed herself up to her knees. Her face ended up right in front of my cock. Holy Kelly!

My imagination went wild again as I imagined her sweet mouth sucking my dick. This was so wrong. I could hear the snickering from my friends. Great! Just fucking great! I didn't care about me. I hoped Kelly wasn't affected by all this, but she seemed calm and in control. Her pale face didn't turn any redder than it already had been when I fell.

"Let me help you up." I offered my hand. When our hands touched, warmth I hadn't felt since Olie left me zapped through me. Like a bolt of lightning, she awakened me. There was something there between us. I saw it in her eyes. I felt it in my heart. And it was scary, yet exhilarating. I didn't know what to do with the feeling, but I knew I didn't want to let it go. I couldn't if I tried.

Sometime emotions were uncontrollable. I was having one of those moments, as I wanted to stay there and stare at her—admire her twinkling eyes, her cute, bunnylike nose, and her full, supple lips I wanted to kiss so much right then. What the hell was wrong with me? It had to be lust. Once it hits you full force, it's hard to make it go away. It controls you. And I let it—because damn it, I hadn't felt it in a long time. I had been starving and now I was ready to devour.

I wiped away the shyness and put my professional hat on. To get through the shoot without making a fool of myself again, I pretended she was a guy—a big, ugly man.

"Where should I stand?" I asked, trying to conquer my nerves.

"Right on the X mark," she said. She was avoiding me, too; when I looked at her, she wouldn't make eye contact. Her mega camera focused right on me when she was lost through the lens. But Jesus, when she checked her camera to make sure she had gotten the shot she wanted, she smiled at me—a shy, innocent, yet wicked smile that sent fireworks through me.

Walking to my mark, I glanced over my shoulder at Jax and Josh. My gut told me not to look, but of course, I didn't listen to it. They smacked their heads, reminding me what an idiot I was for falling, and then flashed a thumbs up for who knows what. With a shake of my head and a grin, I gave them the bird. Their laughter followed me to my mark.

Several hours passed with outfit after outfit, until we were finally done. Josh and Jax went home, but Kelly asked me to stay behind because the first round of my individual shots needed to be retaken. I wondered why. In a way, this was a blessing in disguise.

"Here, let me fix that for you." Kelly's arms went around my neck and folded my collar. "There."

Blazing heat infused between us, making it way too hot in there. I knew she felt it, too, when she slowly looked up at me from under her thick, long eyelashes with a longing 'I want to get to know you' gaze. I knew this because I was giving it right back to her.

She cleared her throat, breaking the tension. "I think we should...Ummm, we're ready." She moved away from me, directing me where to place my hands and which way to look. During the whole thirty minutes, she was professional, and we got through the session without eye fucking each other.

"Well, that's a wrap," she announced, giving me her back.

Where had that coldness come from? Had I said or done something wrong? Kelly didn't work directly for Knight Fashion Magazine; she freelanced. I didn't know when we would see each other again, though now I knew where she worked. It would be awkward if I just showed up. Because of Olie, it had been a while since I had wanted to get to know someone else, but I decided to take a chance.

"Kelly?"

"Yes?" She still faced away, fidgeting with her camera. I didn't know what was so important she couldn't look at me when I called her name.

Here goes nothing. "What are you doing this Friday night?"

That got her attention. She turned around without any expression. Shit! She was going to turn me down. I had good instincts about women—whether they were interested in me or not. I had been sure Kelly was, but right at that moment, she wasn't showing me anything.

"Sorry, Nathan. I don't date models, especially when I'll be working with them on projects," she replied. Her tone was smooth and velvety soft. She could have told me to go to hell and it still would have sounded the same. But she turned me down. Me—Nathan Cross—got turned down. Had I lost my touch?

"Sure, I understand. I only asked what you were doing Friday night," I said under my breath as I started to walk away, with my crushed ego.

"However, Mr. Cross..."

I stopped in my tracks, still with my back to her.

She continued. "You didn't let me finish." Her voice seemed closer. She must have been facing me. Then I heard her footsteps. "I can't do Friday night, but I can do Saturday night. You are an exception."

I turned to face her when she placed her hand on my arm. "Am I now?" I teased back, slowly curling my lips into the irresistible smirk I had been told I did so well.

Kelly shifted her eyes to her sneakers. They were purple and black, and the fact she didn't dress to impress somehow impressed me. She was naturally beautiful with skin that was silky smooth to the touch. She didn't wear a lot of makeup, and I liked that about her.

She peered up at me with a shy smile. "Yes, you are."

Her eyes sucked me in. I couldn't look away. I didn't want to look away. I wanted to be there for a while, just staring at her mesmerizing eyes and beautiful smile.

"It's a date then, Kelly. I think I'd like to touch your face." I didn't know what had possessed me to say that, but I really wanted to touch her. Since she didn't say a word—just continued to lock eyes with me—I rubbed my thumb in a feather-light stroke across her cheek. She quivered under my touch, and if I could have heard the sound of her heart beating, it would have been hammering just as fast as mine.

I leaned down and whispered by her ear, "I bet the rest of your body feels just as soft. I would love to test my theory one day." She whimpered—the cutest sound I'd ever heard. "See you Saturday night, Kelly. I'll call you tomorrow. Your cell number is on my agenda."

Leaving her breathless, weak in the knees, and disoriented, I left. Little did Kelly know, I walked out of there exhaling a breath I hadn't known I held. I had meant every word I said to her, but keeping it confident and charming seemed rusty to me. Yup, I needed to move on with my life, have fun, date around, and get out of this hole I had dug for myself.
Chapter Eight

Nathan

Saturday night couldn't come soon enough. Kelly and I had talked for hours on the phone the day after we met. Since she would be working late Saturday at her studio, she had asked me to pick her up there.

I sat on the sofa and waited for her, scrolling through the pictures on my phone. At pictures of Olie, I debated whether to keep or delete them. I decided to keep them. It was a test. How much would those pictures affect me? So far, I was okay looking at them—no sadness, no pain. I was relaxed. When I heard footsteps, I placed the phone in my jacket pocket and turned around to be blown away by the beauty in front of me.

"Hello, Nathan," Kelly said my name with her velvety, smooth voice. "I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. I just needed to change my clothes. I don't think you want to see me in jeans and a T-shirt."

Kelly wore a sleeveless black dress which showed off her legs. "I'll take what you're wearing now." I winked. Taking her hand like a gentleman, I kissed the back of it. It felt warm and nice. I could get used to holding her small, delicate hand all day, and maybe much longer than that.

"You think I'm overdressed?" She looked at my attire, jeans and a navy button-down shirt.

"No. I think you're perfect."

"Thanks." She shrugged, looking adorable. I wanted to kiss her right then and there. "Where are we going?"

"Somewhere over the rainbow," I said. Draping my arm around her shoulders, I led her to my car.

I took Kelly to a restaurant that overlooked the city lights; Josh had recommended it. For a second, it took me back to when I'd proposed to Olie, but I pushed the thought away. I would not think about the past. Tonight was all about Kelly. After the hostess had seated us, we ordered our drinks.

"It's beautiful." Kelly admired the view from the window. Focusing back to me, she gave me a smile. I liked her smile. It was genuine, sweet, and filled me up with warmth. "So, how long have you worked with Knight Fashion?"

"Not long," I replied. "I actually wanted to be an actor, but I ended up being a model instead."

She let out a cute little laugh. "Well, I'm glad you became a model. I might never have met you."

"What a terrible thought," I joked.

Kelly let out a soft giggle. Leaning into the chair, she seemed relaxed and happy. I had been nervous, even though I had told myself millions of times I was going to be fine. And I was.

"What about you?" I asked. "How long have you been a photographer?"

"All my life." She smiled.

I snorted. "Then you must be really good."

"Not really." She shrugged sheepishly. "I just pretend. I don't know why people hire me." Then she slowly curled her lips, giving me a wicked grin. Her whole face lit up with a smile. Flirty and fun. I think I like this girl very much.

"I don't care about your qualifications. Just make me look good." I winked. "And by the way..." I leaned in closer and lowered my tone. "I won't tell anyone you suck and you really don't know what you're doing."

Kelly gave me a huge smile. "Okay. But I don't need to make you look good. You are a natural."

I backed away with a grin. Our conversation broke when the waitress came back with our drinks.

Kelly took a small sip of her mojito. "Do you have family here, or any brothers or sisters?"

I took a gulp of mine. "I do. Both younger." She opened her mouth to ask me the question I knew came next. "One of each."

"Ahhh. You read my mind. So intuitive," she teased. "Not only good-looking, but a mind reader. What am I thinking now?"

I didn't know she was going to be this playful, but I played along. I wanted to see how much she would blush. "That you want me to take you home so I can do all sorts of licking and sucking on your body."

She mouthed, "Oh God!" Then her face turned bright red. She laughed, covered her face with her hand, and then gave me a 'you got me' look.

I changed the subject. "How about you? Do you have family here? How many brothers and sisters do you have?"

She cleared her throat softly. "My family is from Austin, Texas. I moved to Los Angeles when I was offered a job at a studio. It was a small studio, but I wanted to move out so badly I took the offer. Later, I accumulated my own list of clients and my list grew through word of mouth. I decided to open up my own studio, Kelly's Creations, with the encouragement of my older sister, Kelsey. She lives in Texas. She's happily married with two daughters, ages five and seven. They are a handful." She laughed at her own comment, but her eyes beamed when she talked about her family.

After dinner, we went to a small coffee shop near her studio. I didn't want to end the evening just yet. Kelly opted for some green tea and I ordered coffee.

"So how many?" she asked, holding her drink with both hands.

"How many what?"

She pursed her lips as if I should have known what she wanted to ask. "I thought you could read minds?"

"Oh...I was just testing you."

She shook her head. "How many girlfriends? You can tell me if I'm being too nosy on our first date."

I looked at my paper cup. "I've dated a lot, but I've only had one serious relationship. How about you?"

She took a sip, bit her lip, and answered, "I had one, but we broke up when I decided to move to Los Angeles."

"I see." I didn't like her answer. It sounded like what Olie had done to me. Poor guy. I wasn't sure how this made me feel about her.

"I wasn't going to go," she continued. "He meant the world to me. We had been dating for almost two years. I wanted to marry him. I would have given up my career for him, but..." She took a moment. "He thought I was going to leave, so he cheated on me with his ex, and I caught him."

My level of respect for her grew. The fact she would have given up her career for him was very unselfish of her, though I would have understood her if she hadn't. I had to. Olie had left me for her career, and I didn't want to think any less of her, either.

"I'm sorry," I said. "His loss."

She gave me half a smile. "Well, it wasn't meant to be. I was meant for better things." Her eyes bored into mine. "Maybe I'm looking at him. I know we're only on our first date, but I feel so comfortable with you. It's been a while since I felt that connection. If you don't, it's okay, but I wanted you to know. And..." She covered her face with her hand, shaking her head. "I can't believe I said all that."

"It's the tea," I said. "I put in a special truth serum. Now I know you feel the same way I do."

She rewarded me with a huge smile.

"What are you doing Wednesday night?" I threw in.

"I have to check my calendar, but I don't think anything, after work."

I crossed my arms, putting my elbows on the table. "Good. Make sure you block those hours for me. I'm going to be busy the next few nights, and I don't want to wait a whole week to see you again."

Her whole face lit up. "I'll be waiting, then."

After a couple of hours, I took her back to the studio and walked her to her car. As she stood with her back against the car, I caged her in with my arms.

"Well, I guess this is goodnight," she said with a quiver in her voice. I loved that she felt shy around me. She would look up at me and then look down.

Using my index finger, I lifted her chin. "I had a wonderful time, Kelly. And I can't wait to see you again."

"Me, too."

My hand slid down to her waist. I was usually a perfect gentleman on the first date, but what the hell? Life was too short. Taking a step closer and closing the gap between our bodies, I lowered my lips, moving extra slowly so she could anticipate what came next.

"I usually don't let guys kiss me on the first date, but I think I'll make an ex—"

She didn't have a chance to finish her words; I had captured her lips. Every single cell in my body shot alive, letting me know they were enjoying this way too much. The kiss was sweet—not too long and not too short—but a kiss she would think about tonight and the days until we met again.

When I released her lips with a soft bite, she moaned and inhaled a sharp intake of breath. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes in a dream-like state.

"Goodnight, Kelly." I leaned into her ear. "Dream of me tonight. Dream of me licking, sucking, and kissing every inch of your body."

Another soft sound and a fluttering gasp released from her mouth. Before she could speak or move, I opened the door for her.

"Goodnight," she said, eyes dazed.

I closed the door, letting her know it was time to go. Yup, I had just fucked her with my words. Nathan Cross was back!
Chapter Nine

Olivia

Troy and I had been dating for three months and it had been wonderful. He wanted me to move into his penthouse with him, but I opted to spend the nights instead. Isla counted on me to pay the other half of the rent. Besides, three months is way too short of a time to make such a decision.

I entered the penthouse with the key Troy had given me, walked across the hardwood floor to the kitchen counter, and placed my purse on top. A noise from across the room Troy had turned into a studio told me he was in there. Taking off my heels, I tip-toed to sneak up on him.

"Olivia," he growled playfully, pulling me into his arms and scaring the hell out of me. He had been waiting behind the door since I walked in.

"Ahhh!" I softly slapped his arm while receiving kisses on my face. "You knew I was here."

"I can hear you a mile away. Your heels make more noise than my camera." He chuckled, releasing me. "Go to my room. I left a robe on the bed. Take off your clothes and put it on. I want to take pictures of you." He waggled his brows.

I bit my index finger, contemplating what to do. Troy had asked me many times to do this shoot with him, but I had turned him down. It wouldn't hurt, I thought. I would still have a robe on. "I'll be back," I said, giving him a seductive smile as I walked out of the room.

As I climbed the stairs, I gazed out the window overlooking New York City. Troy had the best view of the city, but the magical part was during the night. The city lit up like one gigantic Christmas tree. I could stare at it all day. In his massive bedroom, I saw a black robe laid out on the king-size bed.

I started by unbuttoning my jeans, then I took off my shirt and completely undressed. The robe was silky soft on my naked skin when I put it on. I had done many sessions before, but this one made me nervous. Get a handle on yourself, I told myself. It was Troy, not a complete stranger. He'd seen me without any clothes on, so why the nervousness? Step by step, I slowly went down the stairs and back to his studio.

"Ready, my love?" Troy flashed his green eyes at me with a mischievous smile. He picked up a little black remote and turned on some upbeat music to get me to unwind and get my adrenaline pumping.

I frowned and then gave him a playful smirk. "Okay, but no nude pictures, promise?" Lying on a single mattress covered in a white sheet, in front of a white backdrop, I loosened the tie of my black velvet robe. Propped on one elbow, I pushed the robe off my right shoulder, exposing a portion of my breast and stomach.

Troy didn't answer me. He was too busy looking through the lens. "Show me more legs, love."

I did as instructed.

"Good." Click! Click! Click! "Beautiful. Tilt your head." Click! Click! "Make love to the camera, Olivia. I'm going to send some of these pictures to the top magazines and make you the sexiest woman in the fashion industry. Show me more."

And so I did. I exposed a little bit more, but not too much. It was enough to get a growl from Troy, though.

"Sit up, spread your legs, but cover so you're not showing too much and drop the robe off both your shoulders."

I did.

"There. Bite your lips." Click! "Now, slowly swipe your lips with your tongue seductively."

Troy moved from one side of the mattress to the other, giving me instructions. He was amazing in action. Sometimes he changed the lighting behind me, and sometimes he changed the lens, but he remained focused until he told me to lie on my stomach and bring the robe down to expose my back.

I heard the music, but no sound of Troy's footsteps. Thinking he was changing the lenses or doing something with the equipment, I closed my eyes and placed my head down to rest until...My eyes shot wide open from the wetness I felt on my ankle. Troy was giving me soft kisses up my leg. Moaning, I looked down to find him without any clothes on. I had seen him naked before, but this utterly aroused me.

"Troy, what are you doing?" It was a stupid question; I knew what he was doing. Unexpected, but I didn't mind. I enjoyed every kiss, lick, and nip up my thigh. Every single nerve inside me tingled. Every inch of me he touched blazed from his heat, and every muscle quaked in anticipation of him fucking me.

Quivering and taking in the pleasure, I placed my face down and closed my eyes to savor it all as he picked up the camera again and took some pictures of me, completely disrobed this time—the front and back of me. I had been adamant about not having nude pictures taken, but because he had aroused me, I'd fallen out of control and let him do as he wished. In a way, it turned me on.

After he'd taken a few pictures, he set the camera down and flipped me over to face front. When his tongue met my clit, I gasped softly and rocked with his tongue teasing the hell out of me. "Oh God. Oh, Troy," I said through ragged breaths.

"You're so wet, baby. I want you to be ready for me."

Kneading my ass cheeks, he parted them, just enough to enter me. I gasped harder when he slammed into me. I had been fucked in this position before, but dear—oh Jesus—it felt so good. His groans said he felt the same.

Troy was fulfilling my animalistic, lustful need. The faster he pumped, the more the pleasure intensified. I was on the brink of climaxing, but not quite there. But it didn't matter. This continuous climb took me to the edge, but I wanted more. I didn't want to orgasm just yet.

"Does it feel good, baby?" Troy asked, out of breath. I breathed as fast as he did, especially when his hands reached under and grabbed my breasts. An erotic sensation swept over me when Troy pinched my nipples. That sensation traveled down to my sex, overwhelming me with ecstasy.

Troy pulled out and flipped me over. His mouth roamed my lips, my neck, my breasts, and down to my waist.

"I'm crazy for you," he said, entering me again. "I thought about fucking you all day, and I couldn't handle it anymore with you in that robe, teasing the hell out of me."

"Oh God, Troy." My hands pushed against his chest. I couldn't take it anymore. I was on the verge of losing it. And I could tell he was on the edge, too. No-no-no, don't stop, I wanted to say. I was so close. As our bodies collided in heat and lust, and as much as I loved our intimate moment, something was missing. I couldn't wrap my mind around it until he spoke as he came.

"Olieeee. Fuck! You feel so damn good."

Troy became Nate. His face became Nate's. His body became Nate's. Nate's loving eyes held mine as we came together. Oh hell! I thought I had closed that chapter of my life. I had even placed the photo of us inside the drawer. Troy and I had had sex before, but it was the first time Nate had come between us.

When Troy dropped beside me with his arm across my waist and I felt his hot breath against my skin, I snapped out of it. I wasn't sure what had triggered the ugly feeling growing inside me besides Troy calling me by the nickname Nate used to call me. Then I realized I didn't feel the connection I had felt with Nate. In moving forward with this relationship, I had been trying to forget Nate, and I thought it had worked. But he obviously still haunted the back of my mind, the recesses of my heart.

Troy kissed my cheek and exhaled a huge breath. "You're spending the night, right?"

I told myself I needed to give it some time and give Troy a chance. "Yes. I left my bag in my car."

His hand slowly traveled between my breasts. "Did you bring a dress for tomorrow night?"

I snuggled up to him. "I did."

"Good. I can't wait for my friends to meet you." He gave me a peck on the cheek, picked up his camera, and walked out the door.
Chapter Ten

Olivia

Standing in front of Troy's bedroom mirror, I stared at my black dress as it contoured my figure. The cowl neckline showed a portion of my cleavage, and the dress was short enough to make my long legs look even longer. My legs were Nate's favorite part of my body, besides my smile. Nate told me once that the first thing he fell in love with was my smile. And why was I having these thoughts? Why is Nate invading my mind again?

Troy draped his arms around me from behind and lightly rocked us from side to side as his eyes focused on the sight of us in the mirror. I gasped softly, not from the surprise of seeing him as he appeared in the reflection, but from seeing us together. A part of me didn't feel like I belonged there.

"You look stunning," he cooed. "You ready to meet my friends?"

"Sure," I replied, but I lied.

Frankly, I wasn't sure why I felt reluctant. I hadn't met them yet, but I felt like I wouldn't fit in. Not being the outgoing type but more of a homebody, my smile and the small talk would be fake. However, I decided to perk up and be the social butterfly hostess Troy wanted me to be. But I wished the party wasn't at Troy's place. It was going to be a long night.

After the caterers delivered the food, one by one, couple by couple, and group by group, Troy's friends trickled in. The long table near the kitchen displayed all kinds of gourmet finger food such as broiled shrimp, egg rolls, meat wrapped in bacon, and other tiny things. Next to the food table was the bar, with a few bartenders Troy had hired. It was good to be rich.

After the greetings, Troy mingled with his model and photographer friends. I'd never associated with them before, so I didn't know who they were. I tried to engage in small talk, but it seemed so awkward. I was never good at initiating conversation with those I had just met. Knowing they were important friends in the business to Troy and myself, I pushed forward. But oh my God! Most of them were so shallow.

Exhausted, I sank to the sofa with a wine glass in my hand, trying to drown out the music. The cushion to my right dipped, and I turned. A brunette sat next to me, taking tiny bites of her egg roll.

"So, you're the new flavor of the month?" she asked, keeping her eyes on her egg roll.

"Excuse me?" I said, even though I knew exactly what she had asked. Rude. "Flavor of the month?"

She finally looked at me. Her brown eyes were dark and calculating as she examined every inch of my face. She didn't answer, but continued with whatever she had wanted to say. "I used to be his flavor, but he tossed me away for a new one. Just a fair warning, there might be a new flavor soon." She pointed to the window. "Another warning: if you bring up him flirting with other girls, he might lose his temper."

I should have ignored her, but curiosity got the best of me. Two models, one on either side of Troy, were flirting with him. The redhead rubbed his arm—more like rubbing her body against him—and the blonde laced her fingers through the hair covering his eyes. Jealousy and anger roared through me. Not only had he practically ignored me all night, he was flirting back.

I felt like a fool. When he had introduced me to his crowd, he didn't mention the word 'girlfriend.' And sometimes he left me hanging as if I wasn't there when the guests arrived. I looked like a stupid idiot standing next to him. Some of them had been nice enough to shake my hand, and a few others had ignored me after they gawked at me. What the hell was I to him, now that we were practically living together? Would he act that way every time we had a party? I tried to find reasons for his actions, like he hadn't seen me standing next to him, or he was too excited to see his friends and had forgotten to introduce me.

I turned back to the brunette, but she had gone, and I didn't know why, but I suddenly wanted her sitting by my side. Maybe she could have told me more about Troy, particularly the side I hadn't yet discovered. I didn't bother to look for her. What was the point? She was obviously hurting. Troy had hurt her to the point she needed to get her anger out, or maybe it was simply a warning.

I turned back to Troy, debating what to do, but he was gone. Crossing my legs, I gazed around the room until my eyes stopped on a man in a dark gray suit. From the back, he looked just like— My heart pounded against my chest so hard, the ache I'd forgotten pouring in like a heavy storm.

"Nate?" I whispered under my breath. No. Why or how would he be here? I would have recognized him but then again, I hadn't bothered to greet any of Troy's guests who'd arrived after he pissed me off. Standing up, I weaved through the shoulder-to-shoulder. How many people were there? It was difficult to get to him as I made my way through the maze of people.

This man was the same height as Nate, same build as Nate, and had the same color hair and style as Nate's. What if it is Nate? What will I say? Oh, my heart, be still. My heart danced in my stomach as I drew closer. Is it him? The excitement tingled down to my toes. It was. He turned around and ran straight into me, almost knocking me down with my glass, but he held on to me tightly. Our faces were touching, cheek to cheek. When he lowered me down, I peered up at him and deflated.

"I'm so sorry. Are you okay?" He released me, his huge grin, saying he liked what he saw.

Even his deep, manly voice sounded like Nate's. But his eyes, those piercing blue eyes, were not Nate's. What was I thinking?

"No, it was my fault for walking so fast. I thought you were..." I paused. "I mean—"

To my horror, the man's body swung to his right and hit the floor. What the hell just happened? The crowd quickly dispersed around us, leaving the man, me, and...Troy? Troy's jaw clenched, and the veins in his arms bulged. His hands flexed open and closed, making fists several times.

"Why did you hit him?" I yelled at him. I didn't mean to raise my voice, but the built-up anger inside me exploded.

"H-h-he waaasss touchin. You fugin' mine—no-no-body touchezz mine," he slurred, stumbling a few steps toward me.

The man who was handsome, maybe a model, got up and walked away, rubbing his jaw.

"You need to cool off. I ran into him," I stammered. Gazing around, I realized every single person in the room stood still, staring at us. Then I saw the woman who had warned me. She shook her head and walked away. Troy glared at everyone, and as if he had given them a green light, everyone went back to what they had been doing.

Placing my glass on the table, I dashed upstairs as fast as I could, as the tears threatened to fall. Never had I been so humiliated. It was one thing if Troy had punched that man to save me or to protect me, but it was something else when he had no clue what had been going on, and to top it off, he was wasted. None of his friends seemed concerned. Maybe they didn't care.

"Olieeeeva."

Troy had followed me into the bedroom. Opening the closet door, I grabbed my duffle bag and placed it on the bed. I went back to the closet, pulled out some of my clothes, and shoved them into the bag.

"Olieee." He groaned, unable to stand on his own. Why the hell had he gotten so wasted? I shuddered at the name Olie.

"I'm leaving. You're a jerk. I can't believe you punched that guy. You embarrassed me and you embarrassed yourself." I kept shoving my clothes into the bag and Troy kept taking them out when I went back to get more from the closet.

Troy sat on the bed, arching his brows and gripping his hair with his fists. "No, no, no. You...can't leave meee." Dear lord. I wished he could hear himself. Just like a toddler throwing a tantrum. I jerked when he unexpectedly gripped my arm so tightly it hurt.

"Troy, you're hurting me." I pushed away from him. Rubbing my arm, I backed away. "You're drunk. You don't even know what you're doing." I was disgusted with him. He was not the kind of man I wanted to fall in love with. My mom had told me once that there were two types of men: ones who loved you more, and ones who loved themselves more. He was definitely the second kind. I hadn't known it before, but I knew it then. No man who loved me more would get this drunk or make a fool of me in front of his friends.

"You..." He pointed at me with his eyes narrowed, taking stumbling steps toward me. I couldn't tell if he couldn't focus on me or if he was seeing two of me. Regardless, I didn't like his domineering expression, like he owned me.

Moving around him, I walked to the other side of the bed and reached for my bag. This time he managed to move faster and grabbed my bag before I could.

I rolled my eyes and frowned. "Give it back." I sounded like a little girl who had something taken away by an annoying older kid.

Troy's eyes softened. "Please. Y-y-you—I mean, I...wassschted...I don't know what I'm doooing. Just sshhtay."

Normally, I wouldn't put up with that shit, but I also knew it wouldn't look good if I walked out of there with my huge bag in front of his friends. The damage had been done. I didn't want to create any more.

"Okay. No more drinking tonight. Just put my bag down. Let's get you back to your friends." I walked to the door and waited for him. His friends probably didn't care he wasn't down there. As long as they had food and drinks, they didn't care. It was none of their business, anyway.
Chapter Eleven

A month later

Nathan

It had been refreshing dating Kelly for a month. She was everything I wanted in a woman: kind, independent, and genuine. We had a lot of things in common, and one of them was liking to eat at home and watch TV instead of going out.

I'd been going to her place instead of mine because I wasn't ready to have her at my place yet. Everything still reminded me of Olie. Besides, I was looking around for a new apartment. I also didn't want Kelly to see my place. It wasn't as classy and elegant as hers. Not that she would have looked down on me; it was just that male ego thing.

Kelly lived in an upscale neighborhood. Every way I turned in the parking garage, all I saw were expensive cars. Even inside her home, I could tell the furniture was costly from the quality of the material.

I wrapped my arms around Kelly from behind, moved her hair out of the way, and kissed the sensitive spot on her neck. "What are you cooking?"

Kelly let out a soft moan. "Beef stew," she answered, stirring the pot. Pulling out the ladle, she blew on it to cool it down and took a tiny taste. "It's perfect and ready." She turned to me after she had covered the pot and turned off the flame. "With rice or fettuccini noodles?"

I gave her a baffled look. I'd never eaten beef stew with fettuccini pasta before, but I thought I would try it. "Noodles."

She tapped me on the shoulder before she opened the wooden cabinet to take out a white plate. "You're going to love it," she sang. She winked and shook her ass a little to the music she had blasting through her apartment as she dumped some pasta on the plate. Kelly was so darn cute as she hummed to the lyrics while pouring the beef stew on the plate.

After taking both our dishes to the table, I grabbed the napkins and cutlery, and the wine I had brought from home. I filled our glasses, and then I went back to get the salad already portioned off onto smaller plates.

"Eat up," Kelly said, sitting across from me, holding her fork. Her tone was always full of life and happiness. I had yet to hear her angry or sad.

"Looks and smells delicious," I said gratefully.

Kelly smiled. It was the first time she had cooked for me. "It's not that hard, but it's one of my favorite dishes."

I took a bite and savored it. "I hope you have more." I winked to show her how much I enjoyed it.

She twisted the noodles around her fork. "Thanks." She smiled. "Really...it was nothing." Then she gazed at the vase of roses I'd had delivered last week to her studio. "Thank you for the roses again. I've never received flowers at work before. I mean...I've received them from clients, but only business related."

"Just a little something to let you know how much I'm enjoying our time together." I took a bite. "I can't believe I've never had beef stew with noodles before. My mom served it with rice or bread."

She let out a soft laugh, finding humor in our little conversation. Kelly and I had a connection, no doubt, but something was missing. Maybe I felt this way because our relationship was still new, and we were just getting to know each other. I had told Kelly I'd had one serious girlfriend, but I didn't tell her anything about Olie, not even her name or where she lived.

"Yeah, my mom served it with rice or bread, too," she added, looking at the lights above. "Is it too dark?"

Gazing at her high ceiling, wishing I had high ceilings at my place, I also admired the unique lighting fixture. Eight round balls reminding me of Christmas ornaments were gathered into one long, swirl shape illuminated with a soft, dim glow. "It's perfect," I said.

After dinner, we washed the dishes together and sat on the sofa to watch the new season of Supernatural. Kelly loved it, and she had gotten me hooked on the show, too. Draping my arm around her shoulders, I idly traced circles with my finger on her arm.

"Maybe if this modeling thing doesn't work out, I should hunt demons instead," I joked.

Her eyes grew wide and she covered her mouth with her hand to stop the sound of laughter escaping.

I pulled back, frowning and pretending to be hurt. "What? You don't think I can be like Dean?" I picked him because she had a major crush on him.

She dropped her hand and gave me a lustful stare. "Are you kidding me? You would make a hell of a demon hunter. The demons wouldn't know what to do with you 'cause you're too good-looking."

I pulled her closer to my body. "Really?"

She bit her lip playfully, nodding. "Really."

"I think I need to show you what I will do to that beautiful demon when I catch her."

Kelly's eyes gleamed as she ran her index finger down my chest, lower and lower, until her hand lightly caressed my—I groaned, imagining her hand inside my pants. I watched her slide her tongue across her lips and then bite it. Her actions alone gave me a rise. We'd already had sex twice and felt comfortable with each other.

"I think you should." She nodded as she spoke. "Because this beautiful demon won't be able to attend M. Knight's opening night next week. I'll be out of town, so I need to have plenty of torture to remind me of what I'm missing."

"That's too bad. Then I'm going to torture her like she's never been tortured before." My tone was flirty and playful, and from the wicked smile she was giving me, I could tell she loved how I was talking to her.

"What kind of torture?" She started to unbutton her top.

I slid my leg under her and shifted her on top of me as we lay across the sofa. My head on the armrest provided neck support, along with a great view of her cleavage, which drew my eyes as if flashing neon lights were saying "lick me."

"It's called tongue torture." I waggled my brows.

"Ohhh, that sounds painful. But then again, I think I'll like it coming from you." Kelly managed to unbutton all her tiny buttons as she spoke. Each one undone brought me to another level of arousal. It was a good thing she did it quickly or I would have intervened. My lack of patience would have made me rip open her blouse. Last one. I couldn't hold tight to my lust any longer.

"Yes, you will," I growled. Gripping her shoulders, I lifted her higher. My mouth ravenously took in her breast. I was no longer the demon hunter. I had become the demon, taking in my prey hungrily and lustfully. My tongue moved from one breast to the other when I unhooked her bra. She moaned louder when I sucked and nipped her nipples. My body moved to the motion of hers grinding against my hardness. Oh fuck! I needed to be inside her now.

"Oh, Nathan," she moaned, and then whimpered louder when I sucked her nipples hard. "Oh, God. Please. Take these off." She tugged at the zipper of my jeans.

While I teased her with my tongue on her neck, I reached under her and unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans. Pulling them down to just below her waist, it gave me easier access to slide my hands inside from behind. I grabbed her ass and dry-fucked her as we kissed madly.

My cock throbbed with the need to be fulfilled. I closed my eyes, soaking in the euphoric feeling of my hands roaming all over her body. As we continued to put our hands, lips, and tongues anywhere we could, I lifted her up, ready to take her to bed, but I froze for a second when she said, "Oh, Nate. Don't stop." Her grip on me got tighter, afraid I would let go.

It was the weirdest feeling, as if that name cast a spell on me to freeze, and I did. Kelly's face became Olie's. Her scent became Olie's. Kelly's body became Olie's. I pulled back until Kelly's voice became her own again.

"Nathan?"

Snapping out of the sick trance, I locked Olie away in the back of my mind. "Kelly," I said, reminding myself. Bringing back the passion I had just killed, my tongue met hers again with more lust and need as I led her to her bedroom.
Chapter Twelve

Olivia

"Olivia, can you come out here, please? You have a delivery," Isla called through the door.

I closed my laptop and walked out. "What is it?"

Isla shrugged. "I don't know. I signed for it. Didn't you hear the doorbell?"

We were both staring at the big box as if we'd never seen a box before.

"No, I was listening to music. I had my earphones on," I said, picking up the box Isla had placed in the kitchen on the dining table.

"Do you think it's from Troy?" she asked softly. "I mean, I know you broke up with him last week, but that guy won't stop calling you."

"I don't know." I walked to the kitchen, took out a pair of scissors from the drawer, and came back, ready to slit the tape on top. They went right through. I opened it and pulled out a clear vase with beautiful, long-stem red roses, not quite bloomed.

"They're beautiful," Isla gushed, leaning against the table and taking a whiff of the roses. "Who are they from? Do you have a new boyfriend or a secret admirer I don't know about?" she teased. "I pretty much know your love life, like you do mine. Not that I have any."

"No secret admirer that I know of." I shrugged. "There's a note." I pulled it out and opened it.

Olivia,

I miss you. I'm sorry. I'll do better, I promise.

Love,

Troy

Putting the note back into the envelope, I said, "It's from Troy. He said he misses me. He wants to get back together again." My voice was so flat, I probably sounded like I didn't give a crap he'd even sent me the flowers.

Isla drummed her fingers on the table as if trying to get my attention, but she already had it. "You never told me why you broke up with him. What did he do this time?"

I didn't even bother to smell the flowers or admire them for even a second. To me, they were black, deathly roses. "It's the same thing, Isla." I looked my friend squarely in the eyes. "I'm tired of him always getting mad at me. I'm like his punching bag. He says he cares about me, yet I feel like he doesn't respect me."

"Oh," was all she said.

Troy had anger issues, but I'd never told Isla to what extent. So to her, I must seem like a baby who didn't appreciate the fact I was dating one of the top photographers in the fashion industry. Models would practically throw themselves at him to get their pictures taken by him. It would boost their self-esteem and possibly their career. To have Troy shoot you was like receiving a blessing from The Pope. But no matter what his status was in the business, I couldn't overlook it anymore.

Troy got mad at me if he thought I was flirting with another guy. He would cuss, throw things, and then apologize. But he would try to make it seem like it was my fault and his actions were justifiable. There had also been occasions when he had yelled at me after he had failed to land a certain deal. He was a well-known photographer, but with his people skills, he was going to lose some clients. Who would want to work with someone like him?

Troy had never hurt me physically, but he was affecting me mentally. When he frowned or showed any sign he was upset, my body would stiffen. I had to build a wall around myself so I wouldn't lose it. It was no way to live, and I didn't want a relationship based on fear. I wanted trust, respect, and love—like I used to have with Nate. Thinking of Nate made me somber and regretful. I pushed his memory to the far back of my mind and locked it away. Thinking about it hurt too much.

Isla pulled out her chair. "Well, whatever he did, he's sorry. Maybe you should give him another chance. The last time you were really mad at him, he didn't send you flowers. So either he's really sorry, or he did something really terrible."

I waved my hand, letting her know it was over. "I'm done. It's been a hell of a rollercoaster ride for months. I'm so glad I didn't move in with him permanently."

"Want to know something?" she asked, crossing her arms on the table.

I pulled out a chair and sat across from her. "What?"

"I'm glad you didn't. Or we wouldn't be roommates." She smiled.

I rested the palm of my hand over hers. "Me, too," I agreed, and placed it back down at my side.

From the moment Isla and I had collided in the restroom at a fashion show, I knew we were going to be friends. She had lived in New York for six months before I came aboard. I had been living in a hotel, trying to find a place of my own. I found out she needed a roommate and moved in the next day.

Though I'd heard horror stories about backstabbing models, Isla had been anything but that. She had taken me in and treated me as she would her own sister. I appreciated her friendship, but even though I trusted her, she didn't know much about Nate. The topic of him was off-limits with anyone, especially to my new friends.

"Hey." Isla tapped the table. "Let's go out to dinner tonight. We need to celebrate our special projects we were both lucky to be hired for. I'll call Michelle and Darcy." She hopped out of the chair and sprinted to her room. A minute later, she came back and sat down again. "Done. Tonight we celebrate two things: One, our careers. And two, men are assholes. We don't need them. Forget them. We have amazing careers."

A loud snort burst out of me. "It's 'men are assholes and we don't need them' night! And your special project at Cosmo and mine at Knight Fashion. I can drink to that. Thanks to your friend Kelly."

"Yup," she agreed. "Sometimes, it's not who you screw, but who you know. I can't believe she was able to put her contacts to good use. My agency was really happy about that."

"That was very nice of her. We barely know her."

"We have to thank Michelle. She sent it to Kelly. Kelly submitted it to her connections, and that is how things roll."

I laughed again. "You didn't really screw anyone to move us up the ladder, did you? Is this something new about you I should know?" I teased.

She waggled her brows. "One never tells, you know?"

I knew she was joking. Isla had a good head on her shoulders. She had told me about how she had been approached to do an unpaid shoot to gain more exposure in her career, and she had turned it down. She was beautiful, but with brains.

"But..." she continued. "Oh man, if Max or Matthew Knight offered me their bed, I would take it. Have you seen pictures of them, or seen them up close?"

"I've seen pictures and they are very...what's the word?"

"Fuckable," she blurted out as if she was thinking about it. "Oh, believe me, they are in my wet dreams."

I leaned back against the chair and crossed my arms. "You know they're both married, right?"

"Oh, yeah." She nodded. "They are models of how married men should behave. Believe me. They're family men. I know this. I know this through every aching 'I wish one of them would touch me' fiber in me. Not that I've tried to get them to bed, but I know some who tried. Failed, I tell you, failed."

I wiggled my nose and sneezed. My eyes automatically shifted to the roses. "You have to admit, they are the type of men we want to fall in love with."

Isla inhaled a long sigh. "Yeah. Where are those men?"

"I don't know." My lips tugged at one corner into half a smile. I did have one, I wanted to say, but I tossed him for my career. I was too young and naïve back then. If I knew back then what I knew now, would things have been different?

"Come." Isla tugged me out of my comfortable seat. "Let's get us ready for a night on the town. By the way, when you get to LA, look up my model friend Josh Bennett. He's a really cool guy. I think you two could hit it off."

"Sure," I agreed. I would look him up since Isla was bound to give me his number, but if I looked up anyone first, it would be Nate, just to see how he was doing. Maybe. I didn't know if I would be brave enough to do it. I wasn't sure if I could handle it if Nate was in a serious relationship. It wasn't fair of me to think that way, but that was the selfish side I couldn't control.
Chapter Thirteen

Olivia

Isla and I took a cab since we didn't want to walk a couple of blocks in our heels. Living smack in the middle of Manhattan, we could walk anywhere. Isla didn't like to spend a lot of money on cab rides, so our destination was very close. It sucked not having a car, but it would be difficult to get around in Manhattan with one, anyway.

When we got to the restaurant, we saw our friends Darcy and Michelle already seated at a table. Actually, they were more Isla's friends than mine. The three had hired in together and met at orientation. I didn't know them well, but since they were nice, I didn't mind them joining us occasionally.

"I see them. They're at the far end," Isla said, guiding me while holding my hand. I had spotted them first, but I let Isla be in charge.

When I neared the bar to the right, I noticed a few men glancing our way with lustful eyes as we walked by them.

"Isla, Olivia." Michelle said our names like she appreciated what we wore. She got up to give us hugs, followed by Darcy.

"Ladies, what's the occasion?" Darcy asked, sitting back down.

"It's..." Isla wiggled her ass a little and sat across from me, "my 'I don't give a crap about men' dress. 'I'm going to look good and own it' dress."

And she did own it. Both of us wore skintight black dresses that formed to every womanly curve of our bodies. Isla's dress dipped a little bit lower in the front, showing more of her cleavage than mine.

The waitress came by to hand us our menus, took our drink orders, and left.

"Well," Darcy said, lowering her eyelashes and glancing toward several tables beside us. "I think you're earning a lot of good attention." She twisted a strand of her blonde hair around her fingers. Smiling, she gestured her head to the side.

I knew what she meant, but I didn't want to make it obvious, so I slowly brought my menu down just enough to take a look. Two men in dark slacks—one wearing a white dress shirt and the other in a navy dress shirt, and both with sleeves rolled up midway—were smiling at us. They were very attractive, but I wasn't in the mood. Not that I thought they were attracted to me in particular. Four female models at a table was surely an attention grabber.

Oh my God! We were acting like high school kids, whispering back and forth. Thank goodness the waitress stopped by to hand us our drinks and take our orders. It took us several more minutes since we hadn't had a chance to look over the menu. But having dined there a couple of times before, I already knew I wanted to order their seafood linguini. After the waitress left, our conversation went back to normal.

"I can't believe Isla is leaving for Paris and Olivia is leaving for Los Angeles in a week," Michelle said, taking a sip of her red wine. "I'm so jealous."

Darcy glanced at the other table then back to us. "You're not really jealous, Michelle. You just want to see the Knight brothers."

Michelle took another sip. This time her face flushed; or was it from the wine? "I want to be sandwiched between the Knight brothers." She let out a good laugh, making the glass in her hand shake a little.

We all chimed in and laughed with her.

Darcy's lips curled into a wicked smirk. "Well, they're untouchable. For now, I wouldn't mind being their dessert."

I couldn't believe the topic of our dinner conversation from these single, young, horny women.

"I like your thinking," Isla said, leaning back in her chair.

"How long are you going to be gone?" Michelle asked.

"About two weeks, I think," Isla replied. "But if all goes well, maybe off to LA to visit Olivia. Wouldn't that be fun, Olivia?" She kicked my feet under the table.

I snapped out of my stupor. With Los Angeles one week away, it suddenly hit me I might run into Nate. I had no idea where he lived or what he did. Come to think of it, going to Los Angeles didn't sound like a great idea. LA was huge. I was going to be busy working. Surely, I wouldn't run into him. What are the chances?

We worked in two different industries. He probably did commercials, or perhaps he was on a TV show. I hoped for his sake he was living his dream, just like me.

"Yeah, it would be lots of fun." I didn't even remember the question. Soon after, the waitress came with our food. Having had only a light lunch at home, I was beyond starving.

"Where are you staying? Did they put you guys up at a hotel?" Darcy's eyes gleamed with envy.

"Only the best," Isla sang, taking a bite of her chicken cacciatore. "How about you, Olivia?"

"I'm actually going to stay with my mom." I opened my purse. My cell kept flashing brightly since I had put it to silent mode. The ID showed Troy was trying to reach me, but I didn't want to talk to him.

Michelle chewed and swallowed. "Take lots of pictures for me, okay?"

I nodded with a smile and then twirled the noodles around my fork. Feeling grateful to Michelle, I said, "Thank you so much for sending our photos to Kelly."

"It was my pleasure. I'd rather one of us get the job than someone else."

"Say hi to Kelly for us, will ya?" Darcy added. She pointed her fork in the air as if at Kelly. "She's so lucky. She gets to take photos of great-looking men. What a job."

"So true." Isla pushed her hair out of the way of her soup.

I'd never met Kelly before, but from what Michelle told me, she could have modeled, but her passion was for photography instead. Currently, she was working with Knight Fashion Magazine on a special project. I'd heard many great things about her, so I couldn't wait to meet her.

The waitress came by again and handed us glasses of white wine. "Ladies, these drinks are from the two gentlemen at that table." She looked over her shoulder at them. "I just want you to know this is a very expensive wine." She left with a smile.

"Well," Darcy began, "we can't let it go to waste." She lifted her glass to them and nodded politely.

The dark-haired one winked and raised his glass.

"Later," Darcy mouthed, winking back.

As we finished our dinner, we talked about the demands of our job, who was dating whom, and what models to avoid. I liked listening to the gossip but didn't have any to share. Not that I'd say anything if I did. I didn't want to be the one spreading rumors. After dinner, Darcy and Michelle stayed behind while Isla and I took a taxi back to our apartment.

"What happened back there?" Isla asked, closing the door behind us.

I kicked off my black heels. "What do you mean?"

"We were supposed to have a fun night, the 'forget the men' night."

We both dropped onto the sofa.

"I did have fun. I think we're just getting too old to get wasted," I laughed.

Isla tilted her head to look up at the ceiling. "Yeah, maybe. Did Troy call? I was watching you every time you looked down at your purse. I figured when you didn't answer, it was him."

I placed my feet on the coffee table and rested my head back on the sofa. "Yeah, he did," I confessed. I inhaled a deep breath. Not wanting to talk about me anymore, I changed the subject, "What happened to the guy you went out with several times?"

Isla turned to face me and rested her head on the sofa. "He's not the one, Olivia. Why is it so hard to find the one?"

"Maybe the one will come later. It's not time." I did have the one, I wanted to tell her, but I couldn't open my mouth to say the words.

"Yeah, maybe." She paused. "We're both pathetic." She laughed. "It's Friday night and—"

The door banging noisily brought our conversation to a halt. It sounded like someone was going to break through it.

"What the hell?" Isla got up and I followed.

Bang! Bang!

Isla peeked through the peephole while I stood near the kitchen, ready to grab my Taser from the drawer. I still had the Taser Nate had given to me. He had wanted me to carry it, especially the nights when I worked late. He was sweet that way, always thinking of my safety.

"Olivia! I know you're home. Open the goddamn door. I won't stop banging on this door if you don't open it."

"Shit." I rolled my eyes.

Isla shook her head in disbelief. "Are you going to talk to Troy or do we pretend we're not home?"

"If I don't talk to him now, he's going to come back. He might even bang on the door all night." I grumbled. "I'd better talk to him and get this over with. Let him in, please." All my energy drained with my last words.
Chapter Fourteen

Olivia

Isla opened the door and ran into the living area. She turned on the TV and pretended he wasn't there.

"What the hell, Olivia?" Troy barked, barging in as if he were invited, as if he had the right to be there. "Why don't you answer my calls? I could've been hurt somewhere and needed your help. What? You don't care about me anymore?"

He only cared about himself. What if I were hurt or something had happened to me? He'd never worried about me before. I considered using the Taser just to shut him up.

I set the Taser down and walked out of the kitchen before he could stop me, into my safety net of Isla. "I...must have had the phone off," I said. My hands trembled, betraying my fear. He had never hurt me before, but I didn't like his tone, and I didn't like the fire in his eyes.

He calmed down when he saw Isla. "Can we talk in your room?" he grumbled, eyeing Isla without a smile.

"Sure." I led the way and closed the door behind us. Be brave! What the hell did I need to be brave for? I was tired of this shit. Using the wall for support, I leaned back and crossed my arms. "I can't do this, Troy. We're done. It's over," I said sternly.

His forehead crinkled and his jaw tightened. Then his eyes softened. He raised his hand to touch my face, but dropped it instead. "Baby..." He took a step closer. "Please, just give me one more chance. I promise I'll work on my temper." His hand pressed the wall by my shoulder while his other hand laced through my hair. "Come home with me tonight." He inched closer, grazing his lips against mine. I used to like that feeling. It used to send tingles through every part of me. But I felt nothing. He smelled good, wearing the cologne I'd bought for him, but I wouldn't let that affect me.

Shit! My heart melted at the way he begged me with his eyes. He didn't mean the things he'd said and done. He'd never hurt me physically. But he scared me, a big reason to be out of this relationship. I was an intelligent woman, but sometimes what the brain told me to do, my heart wouldn't follow. But I had put up with enough.

I shoved his hands down and walked away. "No, Troy. I meant what I said." I turned to avoid his eyes. "Please, just leave."

"You're kicking me out?" He sounded surprised, raising his tone a little bit louder.

I shuddered from the intensity in his voice. A vision of him throwing my picture frames and my books off the shelf came to mind. He had never shown that kind of aggression there, but only because we had spent most of our time together at his place. I couldn't predict what he would do. His temper varied, depending on his mood and how much he drank. But he seemed sober.

"Yes," I said with conviction, meeting his eyes. I stumbled away at his shocked expression. He was furious. Not only had I rejected him—something he wasn't used to—I'd hurt his ego, his pride. My pulse raced, blood rushed to my head, and I was aware of every frightful nerve in my body.

With his fists in tight balls and fire in his eyes, he seethed, "We're not done. And you don't mean that. I'm going to give you time to think about it. You don't get to leave me. You leave when I'm done with you." He slammed my bedroom door and the front door on his way out.

His words left me shivering. Isla ran into my room just as I was about to collapse on my bed.

"Olivia, are you okay?" she asked, eyebrows drawn together in concern. Her hands were clasped together as if she were afraid, too. "Okay. I'm never, ever, going to ask if you're going to give him a second chance. What the hell was that?" Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and opened them again. "Sorry. I shouldn't have gotten mad at you. I'm so glad you broke up with him. He doesn't deserve you. I don't care if he's a hot, famous photographer. He's not worthy of you. He sounded crazy. He didn't hurt you, did he?"

I shook my head, barely able to keep from sobbing. I didn't know why I wanted to cry, except that crying was an outlet for me, and I was embarrassed as hell Isla had heard everything.

Isla took several steps forward and embraced me. Feeling her warmth, my heart eased into a steadier beat. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Promise me...don't answer his calls. Next time he comes over, I'll tell him you're not home. If he does it again, you should threaten him that you'll call the cops."

"Okay." I squeezed her back to let her know I appreciated her friendship and her support. Wiping my few tears, I backed away. "I'm going to sit here for a little while, okay?"

"Sure. I'll be right outside if you need me."

When Isla had closed the door, I grabbed the picture of Nate I had shoved inside the drawer when I'd decided to finally let go of him. I hugged it close to my chest like a security blanket. Lying across my bed, I tucked my knees up to my chest, and closed my eyes to recall when Troy had his first meltdown.

"Goddamn it," Troy bellowed in his office.

I ran to him, thinking he was hurt or something terrible had happened. "What's wrong?" I asked with concern from where I stood by the door.

He grabbed a fistful of his hair and started pacing. "They gave my job to a younger photographer," he seethed. "Who do they think they are, hiring someone over me? I'm Troy McIntosh. I've been in this industry since before that idiot could walk."

Seeing the hurt in his eyes, I approached him and placed my hand on his arm, hoping to calm him down. "Don't worry. You'll get the next one."

Troy backed away from me, giving me an evil eye I had never seen before. "You don't understand," he yelled, pushing me away. I almost fell on the floor from the force of his strength. Then, with a loud growl, he shoved everything off his table. The lamp, the computer, a beer bottle, and everything on the desk crashed to the floor.

"What the hell is wrong with you? It's not the end of the world. You already have jobs lined up, and there are always more to come," I fired back. Big mistake.

Troy slowly lifted his head and stared at me as if I were his worst enemy. "Get out of my office," he fumed. "This is not your place."

Troy didn't want my opinion. Whatever the issue was, clearly I couldn't understand. But his words hurt me. I knew then I could never love him. I had to get out of the relationship. I could only imagine what he would be like in the future when there were more projects he didn't get, and I didn't want to stick around for it. Trembling and worried he might do me harm, I ran upstairs to figure out what to do. I ended up going back to my apartment.

Troy had been so gentle at the beginning of our relationship. I didn't understand where the sudden change had come from. Maybe it had always been there but it had just taken some time for me to see his true personality. Our honeymoon stage was definitely over.

He used to blame his stress and anger on his job when he didn't land the projects he wanted. There were many new and upcoming photographers, just like with models. Our jobs weren't steady and it wasn't a sure thing unless you had a long-term contract.

Troy used to tell me he needed more jobs because he was broke. With his career as one of the top photographers and his reputation, he shouldn't have been struggling. I would have suggested he stop buying lavish accessories and toys for his huge penthouse, but he would have told me it was none of my business. He certainly wasn't spending it on me, not that I was expecting him to. I was tired of feeling crappy. Then I realized he was the root of my depression, why I felt down most of the time. I needed happy in my life, but I had let my happy slip away. Feeling sleep calling me, I gave in to it.

I was dreaming. This I knew for sure because there could be no possible way Nate was lying beside me, but I let myself sink into the dream. I didn't realize how much I had missed him until I felt his hand slide up my back as he pressed his body to mine. A shudder and a soft gasp escaped me involuntarily. He made everything feel good, even when I'd had a terrible day.

"It's okay, Olie. Let me make you feel better."

I didn't respond. It was strange to know I was dreaming. It was even stranger to have Nate in my dreams. Though every once in a while he would appear in them, it had never been like this.

Nate started massaging my shoulders. Straddling me, he moved my arms over my head. Kneading my arms, he slid down to my sides, my waist, and then trailed down my legs until he reached my feet. He used to give the best foot massages. I would look forward to the days when our schedules matched and he would rub all over me to make the long hours of waiting tables worthwhile.

"Feeling better?" He looked at me from under his thick, dark eyelashes in the most seductive way. Even when he wasn't trying to be, he was sexy. His beautiful hazel eyes called to me. He just had that look. He would have been a perfect model.

"No," I teased, biting my lips.

"Then I guess I'll have to try harder." His tone came off way too hot, and the anticipation of what he had planned next was eating at me.

Starting from my toes, his tongue lavishly bathed up my leg. Holy shit! I throbbed between my legs, and he hadn't even reached there yet. And how did I get naked? That was the best part of dreams. I could be naked if my mind went there. He continued, sucking me and giving sweet, tender kisses with his eyes set on mine. It was so hot, especially with his eyes focused on me, determined to make me feel good.

When his mouth enveloped my clit, you would have thought his tongue tasted sugar. The way he moved his tongue and sucked my clit—lord have mercy. I threw my head back and panted.

"Nate," I sang. His name flowed so effortlessly, like I had said it thousands of times. Like we hadn't broken up. Saying and hearing his name used to hurt, but in my dream, everything was all right.

"Do you like that, Olie?" he cooed as his lips moved to my stomach, and his right hand slid to my breast. He was killing me. But right then, I didn't want to die any other way. It was heaven.

"Yes." I nodded, closing my eyes. They shot open when I sensed his mouth over my breast while one of his hands covered the other. Oh, the warmth from his hand and his tongue flashed through my body like lightning. My back arched and I quivered when his other hand played with my clit. "Nate...Nate...I'm so wet. I want you inside me now. Pleasssse."

"Not yet." He hovered over me so our eyes met. "I want you begging. I want you to scream my name. I want you to remember me."

I nodded frantically. "I do remember. I remember how you loved me and how I loved you. I remember all the sweet things you used to do for me. I remember how you would stay up, no matter how tired you were, when I worked late at night just so you knew I had made it back home safely. I remember...you." My eyes pooled with tears as I said the words I truly felt to the depths of me. "You were the best of me, but I have become the worst of you."

I gasped sharply and pleasure ripped through me like never before when Nate moved inside me. Oh my God! He felt so good, so deliciously amazing. My breathing intensified when he rocked faster.

"Come for me, baby," he said sweetly as his eyes drilled through me.

"I will," I whimpered as a pleasurable sensation rushed to my head and down to my toes. All parts of my body were a hot mess, wrapped in Nate's love. Oh God! He was taking me over the edge, filling me up with ecstasy. Air puffed out of my mouth faster and faster as he slammed against me.

"You feel so fuckin' good," he breathed against my ears.

I tried to wrap my arms around him. I wanted to touch his skin. I wanted to run my fingers through his hair. But every time I tried, I grabbed only air, an apparition of Nate. Then something changed. It wasn't Nate anymore. I wanted this man off me, but I couldn't push him away.

Pain ripped through me as this man continued to pump inside me.

"Get off me!" I yelled, but he wouldn't. And when he spoke, I knew exactly who he was.

"We're not done. I'm going to give you time to think about it. You don't get to leave me. You leave when I'm done with you...when I'm done with you...when I'm done with you..."

"No!" I screamed. Then he was gone. All was still and quiet. I slowly fluttered my eyes open to find them damp. It had been a beautiful dream until Troy ruined it.
Chapter Fifteen

A week later

Nathan

Grand opening of M. Knight men's line #KnightFashion #FourSeasons

One thing about the Knights: they knew how to throw a dinner party. The party was held at the Four Seasons, in one of the grand ballrooms. But this was no ordinary party. That night was the launch of M. Knight men's clothing line, which would be sold only in the finest department stores—Neiman Marcus, Saks Fifth Avenue, Nordstrom, Bloomingdales—and would soon be selling internationally.

Invited guests, such as Knight Fashion employees, models, photographers, buyers, and even newscasters packed the room. Knight Fashion was incredibly well connected. In the fashion business, you needed to know a lot of people.

"Hey, where's Kelly?" Josh asked, holding a glass in his hand. His voice carried over the loud music.

Josh and I had been doing a lot of shoots together, and we'd been hanging out whenever we got the chance. Jax joined us when he got a chance to spend time away from his family, which wasn't often. They were his first priority, as they should be.

I took a sip from my beer bottle. "She's out of town."

"That's too bad." He shrugged. "She should be here. They'll be presenting some of the shots she took."

I waved my hand. "I'm sure she won't care. She's done so many." My eyes darted to the screen where they would be doing the presentation of the photos. On screen was the Knight Fashion logo—the word Knight at the top and Fashion on the bottom. Between the words was a black and dark blue cityscape, with the buildings backed by a glow that looked like city lights. Under that was their motto: Everything is sexy at Knight Fashion. How true it was.

"True, but after all, she is your girlfriend, and your photo will be flashing all over the screen." He took another gulp.

My bottle was halfway to my lips when I stopped to speak, "Kelly isn't my girlfriend. We're dating, but we haven't discussed that yet." I said the word "that" as if it were something to be afraid of.

Josh crossed his arms, looking at me like I had told him I was an alien. "But you seem to really like her. You've only been seeing her the past three months. Sorry, you don't have to answer that. It's none of my business." He cocked an eyebrow. "You know, I'm just your friend, who you can trust."

Guilt rushed through me from his words. I punched Josh lightly in the arm with a chuckle. "I trust you." Then I rubbed the back of my neck. "It's just that I want to be sure. Kelly is amazing. I don't want to hurt her if things don't go well, and I don't want to get hurt."

Josh swirled the ice, placed the glass to his mouth, and swallowed. "What could go wrong? But I can understand. You've been hurt before. Going slow is good." He tapped me on my back, agreeing with me.

I wasn't the talkative type, but one night I had gotten sort of wasted at Josh's place. Jax, Josh, and I spilled our guts about our past love lives. It was comforting to know I wasn't the only one who was fucked up. Josh told us about his messed up ex, and Jax and Rachel had broken up in the middle of the engagement but now they were expecting a second child.

I spotted Matthew and Max from the corner of the room with their beautiful families just after they had entered. After they were seated at a table, the Knight brothers walked to the podium. All eyes followed them. Those two men, looking larger than life, needed no introduction. In expensive, tailored suits, they demanded respect. Men and women kissed their feet. People envied them. People wanted to be them. Women threw themselves at the Knight brothers all the time, but I admired their commitment to their wives and children. They truly were role models.

"I think it's time." I gestured my head toward the front, breaking Josh away from making flirty eye contact with a model.

Max stepped in front of the mike first and spoke. "Good evening, everyone." He smiled, silencing the whole room to stillness in just a few words. "Thank you for coming out tonight. I'm going to bore you just a bit with the history of how it all started."

Laughter rang in the air.

"You could never bore us, Max!" one woman shouted.

"Hot Max!" another one squealed.

Max rewarded the women with his smirk and waited until it was quiet again. "My parents had a vision. Besides highlighting fashion weeks from all over the world, they wanted to create a magazine which not only encompassed fashion, but the lives, regrets, and the truth of what it's like to be a model, photographer, and even the crew working behind the camera. Let's face it, without all of us, nothing would get done. And that is how we treat our employees. Everyone is important, no matter what occupation you hold."

The room broke out in applause, interrupting his speech, but Max didn't seem to mind. He simply nodded with a grin and continued when it was quiet again. "One night, my brother and I talked about what we could do to expand the dream our parents had started. There wasn't much to think about. Being in the fashion industry, we knew we wanted to create a men's line. And soon, we will be creating our women's line. We want to thank all of you for being a part of our launch and success. Without you, it wouldn't have been possible. Thank you." Max raised his hand in a gesture of gratitude and walked off the stage as his brother stepped on.

"Hello," he said with a humorous tone. From what I'd heard and seen firsthand, Matthew was the funnier one. "I'm Matthew Knight. I'm not the one who was adopted." He chuckled, making the room vibrate with laughter. "Anyway, as you all know, I'm also the better looking one, but my brother is just as smart as me."

Another round of laughter echoed throughout the room.

"Okay." He shook his head, laughing with the crowd, and then looked at Max, standing just below. "I'm just kidding," he said, and then looked at the crowd. "He's going to kick my ass tonight."

Max laughed just as hard as the crowd.

"Okay, I'm going to be serious now. I don't want you to like me more. It wouldn't be fair to my brother. Anyway, Max is right, though you won't hear me say that often." He shook his head with a soft chuckle, laughing at his own jokes. "We are so grateful for everyone's hard work and dedication. Our launch would not have happened without every single one of you. My brother and I had a dream, and you helped us get there. Tonight we are not only celebrating the launch of M. Knight Men's Line, we are celebrating you. After the models are introduced, there will be a slide show to show you just a few samples of our M. Knight Line. Before I forget, don't forget to follow Knight Fashion and our models on the various social media sites. If you're taking pictures tonight, hashtag Knight Fashion. Thank you. Now, without further ado, give a round of applause, and whistle if you like, for our M. Knight models."

That was our cue. Josh and I walked up to the podium as I blocked out the loud, approving applause. Once I was above the crowd, I could clearly see how packed the room was. Each model took a bow when Matthew called their name.

"Josh Bennett," Matthew announced.

Josh strutted a few steps, took a bow, and came back into the line formation.

"Nathan Cross," Matthew called.

I blocked out the noise and entertained the audience with my sexy stride, as I did on the runway, and went back to the line. The audience loved it as they applauded, cheered, and whistled. Loving the friendly ambiance, I smiled, acknowledging all the love and support from the crowd.

Glancing around the room, my eyes darted to a woman at dead center of the crowd. Her eyes were wide, disbelieving. She held no smile as she stood frozen while people applauded around her. My brain told me I knew this person. I recognized those stunning brown eyes, her gorgeous face, her naturally beautiful blonde hair, and her attractive body. But my heart—my poor aching heart. It felt like a dagger had been stabbed through it.

Olie. Her name thundered in my mind and pounded against my chest. My smile disappeared as I shifted my eyes, pretending I hadn't seen her. It didn't matter where I looked; the image of her shocked face was all I saw. Every face in the room was Olie's.

I'd dreamt of the day I would get to see her again, perhaps when we were both married and old. I'd never forget her, but at least I would have had time to heal, move on with my life, and love someone else. What a nightmare. I had just started to get over her. Now she wasn't haunting me from across the country; she was haunting me from this very room. The walls started to close in. There were too many people. Breathe, I told myself, feeling my lungs constrict. No air. I needed air.

Matthew had perfect timing. He excused the models. Instead of heading into the crowd to watch the show, I walked out of there just as the lights dimmed. I thought someone called my name, but I ignored it and picked up my pace.

After I went through the double doors, I turned right into the lobby, and headed out through the glass doors to what looked like a small garden. I had no plan, but I recalled seeing the garden earlier, and it seemed like it would be a safe place to hide and catch my breath.

The fear that Olie would spot me dashing for the exit and follow me became real when I saw her standing between the double doors, moonlight casting a heavenly glow around her.
Chapter Sixteen

Nathan

"Nate, where are you going?" Olie smiled, but it was faint.

I understood her hesitation. I wasn't approachable at the moment, and my face probably showed it. But damn, she was beautiful—just how I remembered. It hadn't been that long, but it seemed like ages.

"Olie," I said under my breath. It had been so long since I'd said her name aloud. It sputtered out like I was speaking a foreign language. "How long have you been in town?" The proper thing to do would be to greet her with a hug and pretend to be happy to see her, but I wasn't. Memories of our past plagued my mind and mixed with the ache buried deep within my heart. It resurfaced like a tidal wave.

I was so confused. I wanted to reach out and hold her tight, to let her know it was good to see her and that I'd missed her. But just the sight of her constricted my heart so tightly. She still had a hold on me, even though she'd hurt me. Olivia still had the piece she had taken with her, and she was dangling it in front of me.

"It's only been a couple of days. I...ummm, thought about calling you." She let the door shut and took a step toward me.

Thought about, but didn't. What would be the point anyway? Grow up, I told myself. It's been a long time. Not knowing how to answer her, I nodded and pulled up a fake grin. "That's nice. It's good to see you. How have you been?"

Those words seemed to be the key words. With every step she took toward me, the sound of her heels against the cement vibrated achingly through me. Her hair glowed under the lamplight, making her look like an illusion—a dream I had conjured up in my head. That would have been preferable to her standing there before me. She was a reminder that I hadn't been good enough.

She stepped forward as though she wanted to give me a hug, but then she dropped her arms when I took a step back to give us space. "I...it's been good. I've been modeling. I have a roommate. I know you two would get along. I..." She stopped. She was rambling. Rambling meant she was nervous. I felt like a dick. What the hell is wrong with me? Get over it.

"Sounds like you're doing great. I'm really happy for you." This time I meant it.

Olie's eyes sparkled like the stars, but under the light, they were brighter. "Enough about me. Sounds like you're doing awesome. What happened to being an actor? Why in the world did you become a model? I mean, you've got the looks and talent, but you never told me you wanted to be one."

Shoving my hands inside my front pants pockets to keep myself steady, I took in her compliment. It was so strange to see her. I didn't know how to talk to her like we were just friends and as if nothing had ever happened between us. My instincts screamed to kiss her, to hold her in my arms. Already tantalized by her sweet scent, I wanted to gravitate toward her. But my poor smashed heart—it was the only part of me that said to stop, to stop thinking about our past, about us. She was the past. I had started something great with Kelly.

"It's so strange, but an agent discovered me at work," I explained to her.

"Well, she sure knew what she was doing when she hired you." Her smile was too beautiful and perfect. "Wow, you're working with one of the top magazines, and you're one of the Knight models. Look at you." Her enthusiasm and happiness for me made me feel guilty. At one point, I had wished for her to bomb so badly she would be forced to come back home, to me.

My lips curled to my ears as I took in her words, silently thanking her. A part of me was glad she knew how successful I'd become, but a part of me didn't give a crap. I inhaled deeply and rubbed the back of my neck. She watched me silently. Olie knew me too well. She knew that gesture meant I was nervous or uncomfortable.

"Looks like we might run into each other often," I said, not knowing what else to say. "I mean, both of us being models."

She looked down and then back up. Seeing her was so shocking I hadn't noticed what she was wearing until my eyes followed hers down to her heels. Olie wore a long, dark blue dress with spaghetti straps. The slit at her right leg went all the way up to her thigh and made naughty thoughts run through my mind. With her hair lightly dancing in the breeze, she was one hell of a sexy package. She probably turned men's heads everywhere she went. That thought made me jealous. It made me wonder if she had a boyfriend, but I would never have asked. My pride wouldn't let me.

"Actually, we'll be seeing a lot more of each other. I've been signed on as one of the M. Knight models for the women's line. You did know they were starting a women's line, didn't you?"

I cocked an eyebrow. "Yes, I did. But I didn't know you were one of them."

Her elated eyes became somber. "If you feel weird about this, I could back out." She met my eyes with an apologetic look. "I mean...I'm not saying you're thinking this is weird. I mean...I'm okay with working together if you are. I mean...of course you are. Why wouldn't you be, right? I think we can be friends, right? We might have to do a shoot together, but it's just for work."

She was rambling again. I understood what she said, but the thought of having to maybe touch her in certain positions—it would be near impossible.

"No, it's fine. We're friends, after all. We're both seeing someone else. We've moved on." I hadn't intended to say those words, but it was too late to take them back. Deep within me, I wanted to know if she was with someone, not that I was planning to try to get together with her. I just wanted to know. But why did I want to put myself through that torture? Maybe if she was, then it would be a green light for me to move forward with Kelly. Oh, hell! I didn't know what I was saying.

"Oh," she said tersely. "Of course." She gave me a quick smile and then pointed to the double glass doors. "I should go back in. A friend is waiting for me. It was good to see you." This time she gave me a genuine smile, the smile I knew and loved to see.

A friend? The dagger twisted deeper. "Sure. I'll be going back in soon. I just needed some air. It was hot in there," I lied.

She nodded and walked away. When she was out of sight, I blew out a deep breath. I closed my eyes and took another breath. I must have done something wrong in my past life. Maybe I'd hurt a lot of women. God was torturing me, making me pay for my past crimes, 'cause I'd never endured more pain before. The pain was worse than it had been during the breakup, especially knowing she was seeing someone else. I wasn't sure how I would react when I saw the person who had replaced me.

Olivia

I had lost my breath, but my heart danced in my chest with elation when I saw Nate standing there with the other models. Nate was a model? A successful one. If you modeled for the Knights, you had made it to the top. I stared at him on the podium. My eyes zoomed in and refused to look at anything or anyone else. It seemed stalkerish, but I was so proud of my Nate up there.

Fate had brought him to me and I had no problem with it. I loved that I hadn't had to chase him down. I wanted to tell him so much, but I didn't know where to start. I knew that night was not the night to say anything about our past and how I felt, but it would have to be a beginning. I'd make the first move by letting him know I was there. But he saw me. Crap.

Nate's eyes locked on me so hard, they burned a hole through me. He was clearly shocked to see me, but I didn't anticipate the anger in his eyes. His unexpected expression killed my courage and my joy to see him, but what had I expected after the way I left him? I had basically broken up with him without warning. He'd had no idea it was coming. So whatever he said to me, I couldn't blame him. When Nate broke his stare away, he rushed out the door. Shit.

I ran after him. I didn't care about my pride or what he might say to me. Maybe he would tell me to fuck off, but it didn't matter. I needed to say my piece. At least I'd know I'd tried. But I wasn't prepared for the rush of mixed feelings rushing through me.

I missed him. My body and heart knew this before I lost control of my emotions. He was so damn sexy in a suit. Some men looked good in suits, but Nathan, he was drop-dead gorgeous. Suits loved him. They showed off his broad shoulders and his tall, lean but muscular body. Perfect in every way, perfect model body. No wonder he had been discovered. He would go places—there was no doubt in my mind.

Nate hadn't been aware everyone watched him when he rushed out the door to the lobby and then out the double glass doors. I loved that about him. He had integrity, a good heart, and was swoon-worthy, but he wasn't cocky. I had known his worth then, but I had traded him for financial stability. Once I had it, I wanted him back. It was selfish, and I might not get what I wanted, but I had to let him know. Not then. Not there. Not that day. But he had to get his feet warm, to know I was back.

I hesitated to walk to him, but when he asked me how long I had been in town, I took it as a green light. Relieved, I approached him as his eyes followed every nervous step I took. Seeing him in front of me, handsome as ever in the moonlight, sent a slew of lustful tingles through me. I wanted to jump in his arms and tell him so much, but he took a step back when I raised my arms to give him a hug. I thought he would give one in return, but he didn't. That was a slap in my face, but again, I understood. I deserved no courtesies. He was giving me more than I deserved.

My heart dropped to the floor when Nathan said he was seeing someone. He was letting me know he had moved on. Every word out of his mouth stabbed my heart, over and over again. Of course he would be seeing someone else. Any girl would snatch him up in a heartbeat. He was a dream catch, and I'd let him go.

Why had I chased him? Knowing I didn't have a chance, my eyes started to tear up. But what was I thinking anyway? What had I expected? I imagined myself back on the rooftop, but this time, he told me he was leaving me. My poor heart. It worked overtime from the hurt. I endured every aching beat, bleeding sadness through every fiber in me, making me weak in the knees.

I told Nathan I needed to find my friend as an excuse to leave. I needed to walk away before the tears poured out of me. I hadn't realized how much I missed him, missed his friendship, and simply missed us.
Chapter Seventeen

Nathan

Oh, hell! My palms went to my face. I didn't know what had come over me. Actually, I did; I was Olie-struck. She had come out of nowhere, screwing up my night—my heart—my mentality. I had to fix the awkwardness. We were likely to see each other more often, depending on the project. The only way to get through it was to be professional. Sucking up as much of the cool air as possible, I went back to the party after about five minutes.

Damn! How will I find her in this crowd? The slide show presentation had ended and the after-party had begun. Lights flashed with the rhythm of the beat in the dark room. Music pumped through my body. The bass thumped under my feet and pounded in my head. Only in my mid-twenties and already I was too old for this. Maybe I just wasn't in the mood. Not knowing where to start looking for her, I headed to the bar.

After waiting in line for five minutes, I ordered a martini.

"Nathan," a blonde said, rubbing her body against me as soon as I turned. I had no idea who she was. I cringed at the alcohol on her breath. "It's me, Cecilia." She pointed at herself. "You're sooooo hot." She began to stroke my arm. "And so strong."

I tried to brush her off, but it was impossible to do so while holding my drink.

"Look who I found." Cecilia's hand roamed about my chest while the other looped around my arm. Nobody was directly in front of us, so I didn't know who she was talking to.

I let her cling to me so she wouldn't fall, and she never noticed I was moving her toward the bodyguards. One of the things I appreciated about Knight Fashion, they knew how to take care of their models. Anticipating trouble, they had hired bodyguards and provided a taxi service for those who became too wasted to drive. From the couple of parties I had attended, most of the guests acted appropriately, except for a few.

One of the bodyguards came to my rescue and peeled Cecilia off me. She was half asleep but suddenly became alert.

"No, Nathan," she pleaded. "I'm sorry."

"I'll take care of her," the bodyguard said, and then led her to another bodyguard who seemed to be the guy in charge.

Releasing a sigh of relief, I gulped down the remains of my martini. The other half had been splashed on the floor by Cecilia's groping hands. As soon as I turned, Josh and Olie stopped in front of me. Josh held a wide grin, while Olie looked like she had seen a ghost.

"Hey, Nathan. I want you to meet my friend's friend, Olivia." He chuckled, then cut it short.

Josh must have seen my lips pressed firmly and the tightness in my jaw. I didn't mean to scowl like I was going to punch him. Actually, I did want to punch him. He had his arm around her shoulders as if they were lovers, and his hand dangled too low, within reach of her breast. Any lower and he could have copped a feel and pretended it happened by accident. I knew his tricks. Though he had no clue Olie had been mine, I would have punched him if he'd tried to do something. But Olie wasn't mine anymore. So why was I feeling this way?

Olivia shifted and moved away from Josh. "I already know, Na—Nathan," she said stoically.

"Oh." Josh took the last gulp of his drink. Turning, he placed his glass on the tray when one of the servers came by. Then he looked from me to Olie, and then from Olie to me. "Soooo, you two want to talk?"

"No," we both snapped at Josh at the same time.

"Oookay." Josh smacked his lips, unsure of what to do. "I actually don't know Olivia. I mean, we're not friends. Her roommate, Isla, is my longtime friend."

Isla? She's a girl. Roommate? She's not living with her significant other? But then again, she didn't want to move in with me. She had needed to prove her independence. This didn't confirm anything. She hadn't denied seeing anyone, but I had to admit, a part of me had a little hope for us at the beginning of the conversation. Until Kelly came to my mind. I needed to think of her to escape from Olie. But Olie was right in front of me, breathing and sort of giving me a smile, a sad smile at best.

"Anyway," Josh continued, "Isla told her to look me up." His hands were behind his back. He clearly understood my body language and was trying to explain why he'd had his hands on her.

While Josh rambled, Olie and I locked eyes the whole time. At that point, I lost track of what he was saying. And I desperately wanted to know what she was thinking.

"You look great," Olie finally broke the silence. "You know how much I love it when you wear a suit."

I leaned in closer to hear her over the loud music. We had to speak into each other's ears, especially since Olie had a soft voice. The smell of alcohol escaped her mouth. When had she had time to drink? Unless she drank earlier and I hadn't noticed. I must have been too shocked from her presence.

My lips curled enough to give her a hint of a smile. Man up, I told myself. "I'm sorry." I shook my head, disappointed with the way I behaved. "It was a shock to see you."

"It's okay. I understand. I was in shock when I saw you, too." She took a sip of her drink and then ran her index finger along the top of the glass, trying to make do of this awkward situation. She seemed as nervous as I was. Olie looked to the right and left of her and giggled. "I think Josh left without saying anything."

"Trust me, he said plenty." I nodded and shoved my hands inside my pants pockets. My eyes roamed Olie's dress. It looked as though it would be silky to touch. Thinking of the past, I imagined my hands all over that dress, feeling every inch of her body. It's an old habit, I thought to myself as I shifted my mind to Kelly and then back to Olie because she was standing in front of me, so I told myself.

"So, did your 'someone' come with you tonight?" she asked, running her fingers through her hair.

The question came out of left field. "No, she's out of town."

"Oh, I see." Her eyes refused to look at me for some reason. Was she jealous?

I couldn't tell if she sounded disappointed Kelly wasn't around so she could check her out, or for the fact I had admitted again I was seeing someone.

"How's your mom?" I asked. It had been so long since I'd seen Olie's mom, Emily. It seemed strange to ask her that question, but I'd run out of things to talk about.

"She's fine. How about your parents, and Nick and Natalie?" I was surprised she wanted to know about my parents and my brother and sister. I didn't think she gave a shit.

"They're fine," I replied bluntly. "Are you staying at a hotel?" My attention shifted to the men by the bar. Their lustful eyes followed Olie like moths to a flame.

Olie watched me as I casually walked around her and blocked their view of her. She looked curious, but I didn't explain myself. Sure, it was immature of me, but I didn't like the way they were undressing her with their eyes. By the looks of the crowd, the couples had left the party and only the single people stayed. It was a meat market in there. I had been thinking of leaving, but the thought of leaving her by herself made my stomach rumble unpleasantly.

Her eyebrows pinched at the center in a "what the hell are you doing?" look, but she answered my question anyway. "No. I'm staying with my mom."

"Mom?" I didn't mean to sound like I didn't believe her. But if she'd come with a significant other, why would she be staying at her mom's place, unless her mom adored him the way she adored me? Or had she come to LA by herself?

Olivia

Nate was acting weird. He made a half-circle around me and stopped. Was he trying to hide from someone? No, that couldn't be it. We would be in the corner or somewhere else less visible if he didn't want to be seen. I leaned to see around him and then I knew. He was trying to block the view of the men by the bar who were lusting after me with their eyes. Their drunken stares were so obvious.

I was about to do something immature, but I wanted to know if I could still make Nate jealous of other men. I didn't know how serious his dating situation was, but I was about to find out.

"So, do you want to dance or go somewhere and talk?" I asked hesitantly.

Nate rubbed the back of his neck while he looked up at the unremarkable ceiling. Either I made him nervous or he was thinking about his girlfriend.

"We can talk here," he said.

The situation was so awkward. Nate and I were more or less having a staring contest. I knew him very well and from his gestures, he seemed agitated. Releasing a breath, I decided to do what I wanted to do. He wasn't mine and I wasn't his. I could do whatever the hell I wanted. And having had a drink just before Nathan walked back in gave me courage. Though I'd only had one, I hadn't eaten dinner yet, so the alcohol worked faster than usual. And besides, I didn't hold alcohol well.

"You know what? We can talk later. I've had a rough week, and I just want to blow off some steam, if you don't mind." I walked past him before he could answer and went straight to the guys at the bar. I recognized one of the models.

"Ryan," I greeted, ignoring the guy next to him.

"I was trying to get your attention," he said. "Seems like your boyfriend didn't want you to be seen." He chuckled, raking his long dark hair back. He shifted his attention to his friend next to him. "This is my friend Brent."

Brent took my hand and kissed the back of it when I reached over to shake his.

"Hi." I smiled at his way of greeting me.

Both of them had been drinking, but they weren't wasted.

"Would you like a drink?" Ryan asked.

"No, but would you like to dance?" I hoped he would agree so I could get some distance from Nathan.

After a few long seconds, he nodded. "Sure, but I have two left feet and I drank a bit too much."

"That's okay. I won't judge," I said, guiding him to the dance floor. From the corner of my eye, I saw Nathan. He hadn't moved an inch. Had he been watching me the whole time?

The music blasted louder the closer we got to the dance floor. As the bass pounded against my chest, my body swayed to the rhythm. People crowded around us, laughing, smiling, and having a great time. I forgot where I was or why I was there. Ryan was a great dancer, so I lost myself in him.

I took a step back when Ryan closed the gap between us. Oh, what the hell? Why not? Placing my hands on his shoulders as his hands slipped around my waist, we bumped and grinded on the dance floor like we were having the time of our lives.

Sweat beaded across my forehead, and perspiration dripped down my back. It had been so long since I had danced like that, but I didn't have a care in the world and it was actually fun. When the fast music ended, the DJ slowed it down to a softer tone. I was glad for the break; I needed a breather and a rest. Just as I took a step, Ryan pulled me to him.

"Where do you think you're going, Olivia?" he grinned lustfully.

I gasped when his hands cupped my ass and then slowly ran up my back.

"Ryan, get your hands off me," I ordered. "Either dance with me nicely or I'm going to leave."

Ryan's hands stopped moving. I thought he had done as I asked, but when his eyes grew wider, I knew something else had made him stop. He paled like he had been caught red-handed. Whatever the reason, it was strange.

"I think it's my turn," I heard a voice from behind me say. I turned to see Nathan's eyes, fiery as hell. His tight shoulders leaned forward in a predatory, dominating way. He scared even me.

Ryan dropped his hands, glared at Nathan, and left.

"What did you do that for?" I barked.

His lips pursed and his eyebrows lowered. He stared at me, seemingly not sure of himself. "His hands...they were all over you. You seemed...bothered."

He meant he was bothered, but I secretly enjoyed his jealousy. "I wasn't bothered." I glared at him. "I was having fun dancing. Since you kicked him out, you owe me a dance." I didn't give him a chance to decline. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pulled him to me.

Nate stiffened, his arms still by his sides. His actions told me he still held on to his hurt and anger. He didn't move. He didn't speak. Was he breathing? I had to fix this. Not just because I wanted him back in my life, but we were going to see each other often during photo shoots for M. Knight. I certainly didn't want to work in an uncomfortable environment, and I assumed we might be paired up together.

"I don't think this is a good idea," he said close to my ear.

No, it wasn't a good idea. Heat infused my body when the warmth from his breath brushed against my ear. The memories of us making love came crashing through. My body touching his, so close, so familiar, drove me insane. I pressed my chest into his and held him tighter, forcefully moving us to the slow beat.

"It's just a dance, Nate," I returned the whisper by the side of his ear, purposely making my warm breath brush up against the side of his neck. I might have touched him feather-lightly with my lips. When I heard a soft groan, I knew he sensed something.

Slowly, but hesitantly, his hands rested on my hips, and his body moved from side to side. And...he started to give in. Come closer, Nate. Bring your face to mine. I reveled in what I once had—something great with Nate. I missed it. I missed the smell of his cologne. I missed his sexy voice. I missed the way we used to dance together. I missed everything about him, even down to his loyalty to the girl he was dating.

Jealousy erupted inside me as I realized—truly realized—he had moved on. My heart started to ache at the thought I'd missed my chance. But I didn't know what I wanted before. I didn't know I wanted Nate back until I saw him. Oh, God! I need to stop. What am I doing?

Shame on me for trying to lure Nate away from his girl. But from the way he danced with me, he wasn't too serious—I thought—I hoped. That was what I wanted to find out, but maybe I'd gone too far and made a fool of myself. My heart ached for him. He didn't even hold me like he used to. He must have been feeling guilty for dancing with me. That was bad.

Then it all stopped abruptly. Nate dropped his hand as if he'd touched fire. He stepped back, raking his hand through his hair. "I can't. It's getting late. You should go home. I'll take you home."

What? Before I could protest, he grabbed my arm and tugged me out the door.
Chapter Eighteen

Olivia

"What the hell, Nate? I'm not ready to leave." I yanked my arm back. The cool breeze felt so good against my skin, cooling me down from the stuffy air we had walked away from and the heat Nate had produced in me.

He gave the bellman the ticket he'd pulled out of his pants pocket. The whole time he held on to me like he was afraid I would leave him. And really, I didn't want him to let go. I would have stood by his side if he'd asked me to as he waited for his car.

"We need to talk," he said tersely. Then he was silent.

"Fine," I spat, narrowing my eyes at him. "But I need to get my purse and my coat." I walked back inside by myself, got my things, and came out.

When a black Audi pulled up, I assumed they had gotten the wrong car. I knew I was wrong when he made sure I got in the passenger side. He went around, tipped the valet guy, and shifted into drive.

"When did you get a new car?" I asked, gazing at him. He hadn't looked at me once since we had gotten inside.

"About six months ago."

"Did you move or do you live in the same apartment?"

He didn't answer right away. Photograph by Ed Sheeran, the song he had played when he proposed to me, came on. I stiffened at the memory, and his hands tightened on the steering wheel. The veins in his arms bulged. He reached over and shut it off. "I'm moving out soon. Stop asking questions."

"How about you drop me off right here at the stoplight? What the hell is wrong with you?" I fired back.

"What's wrong with me?" He finally looked over, but briefly, just enough to give me an evil eye.

"Yes, what's wrong with you?" I repeated my question. "Why are you acting so strange? And where are you taking me?"

He released a sigh and lightly punched the steering wheel. "Damn it, Olie. What kind of game are you playing?"

"I'm not playing," I lied.

"What the hell do you think you were doing on the dance floor?"

"Dancing with Ryan until you kicked him out. Why, Nate?"

I was fuming. He interrupted my dance with Ryan. He ruined my night by taking me—where? When he got on the 405 Freeway, I realized he was taking me home. A part of me had hoped he was taking me back to his place. Again, what the hell was I thinking?

He didn't answer my other question. "I'm taking you home," he said.

"I know." I looked out the window. "I know where I live."

Both of us released a breath, calming down. After several blocks, Nathan spoke up. "Listen. We might be doing photo shoots together, so let's try to get along and be friends."

My jaw dropped. I thought I had been trying to do that. Crossing my arms and legs because I couldn't get out of the car, I stared at the view ahead. Then, because I was an idiot and couldn't control my curiosity, I started asking questions about her.

"How long has it been?" I broke the silence.

"How long has what been?" He sounded confused.

"How long have you been dating this...person?" My tone had a hint of jealousy, and I hated that I couldn't control my emotions.

Nathan looked over his left shoulder, and then at the rearview mirror to turn left. "Why do you want to know, Olie? It's not like the three of us are going to be best friends. Speaking of which, how long have you been dating this...person?"

I flashed my eyes at him, but he looked straight ahead. Letting out a short laugh, I said, "What gave you the idea I was seeing someone?"

His eyebrows arched, and then he rubbed his temples. "I...you...you didn't deny it," he finally let out.

I nodded and shrugged. "I didn't know you had asked me that question. I think I was in shock to see you." My mind was a battlefield. Every emotion exploded inside me. One thought killed the other, pushing away the want, need, desire, and confusion. One second I wanted Nate, but the next, I trembled with anger. The right thing to do was to walk away. He was seeing someone, but it wasn't serious. Or he still had feelings for me. Perhaps couples could never be friends, especially if they had loved each other.

I'd known in the back of my mind Nathan would eventually move on. The distance between us would help this process. Or so I'd thought. But coming back home and hearing Nathan was seeing someone else killed me. I hoped the feeling would go away. It wouldn't be fair of me to try to break them up. I had hurt him. I was the one who had left him. Could he forgive me? And if he did, could we even make this work? Sometimes it was best not to patch up the past and just leave things as they were.

Seeing the familiar road to my mom's apartment felt strange. It'd been so long since I'd been home, yet it didn't seem like I'd left at all. During Christmas and my mom's birthday, I had flown her to New York, but I hadn't stepped foot in LA until a couple of days ago.

Nate pulled up to the curb and turned off the engine. "How long are you staying?" he asked stoically.

"A week," I answered, looking down at my hands, folded together.

"A week?" His pitch rose.

"Sorry." I shook my head. "I meant I found a new apartment for my mom."

"How's your mom?" he asked for the second time. He must be really nervous, or didn't remember he'd already asked.

"She's good. Just some health problems, but I guess that's life. You can't stay healthy forever." I paused, wondering if I should say what I wanted to tell him, but I did it anyway. "She misses you. She asks about you."

Nate was quiet for several heartbeats. He didn't say anything, but his somber eyes told me he missed her, too.

"Why is she moving?" he asked, changing the subject.

"It's a better neighborhood, and she'll be closer to her friends. We're moving next weekend. But as far as I'm concerned, I don't have a deadline. I guess I stay as long as Knight Fashion wants me. I was thinking of moving back home with my mom again, like before."

I wasn't sure if my last sentence had hit a sore spot for him, but he remained silent for a few long seconds.

"When do you start with the Knights?" he asked.

"This week."

Nathan unlocked the door, and I guessed that was my cue to get out.

"Do you need help with the move?" he asked. His eyes became softer and so did his tone.

I reached for the door handle. "I called a moving company. If you can spare some time it would be great, but you don't need to go out of your way. I'm sure you're busy with...whatever you do on the weekend or who you see." Oh, God! A part of me regretted asking him, but it felt so natural, as if we were still together. But since he had offered, there was no harm in it, right?

"Okay. Let me check my schedule, and if I can help, I'll be there."

"Thank you. I would appreciate that." Instinctively, I placed my hand over his where it rested on his lap, and idly rubbed my thumb in circles. Electric tingles shot through my arms and spread to the rest of my body, warming me in all the right places. How badly I wanted his affection and his arms around me, but I knew he wouldn't give in.

Nate stiffened, looking down at our hands. His eyes focused there for a brief moment, and then he slowly slid his hand away from mine. It was the worst feeling ever. I was the cancer in his heart. The more he pushed me away, the deeper the dagger pierced me.

"It's getting late," Nate said without making eye contact.

"Of course." I opened the door. "Goodnight. Thanks for the ride home." I slammed the door. Climbing up the stairs, I took out my key to the entryway doors. I thought about pressing the intercom, but Mom was probably asleep.

Nate hadn't started his engine. Naturally, I wondered what he was doing, but I dared not turn around. Crap. I can't help myself. I turned just enough to see him staring out the window. Just staring. What was he thinking?

I hoped for a moment he would get out of the car and hold me, to let me know we were going to be okay, even if it meant we would only be friends. But he hated me so much he couldn't even stand me touching him—on the dance floor or in his car. As soon as he saw me open the door, he cranked the engine and drove off. A gentleman until the end.

Nathan

I am so screwed. These words repeated in my mind after I left Olie's place. Olie being single and in town was the worst-case scenario. I could already see myself being the jealous ex-boyfriend. See myself? Who was I kidding? I'd already acted like a jealous ex-boyfriend when she had danced with that ass who had his hands all over her.

I had to stay clear of her if I wanted Kelly and me to have a chance. But it was going to be easier said than done. Just being around her drove me insane. Memories of the good times came crashing through, and I wanted to hold her and go back to the way it had been. But I also cared about Kelly. We hadn't dated long, but the time we had spent together had helped me forget about Olie, and that meant something.

Offering to help her move her mother on Saturday was insane. The words had just come out of me, something I would have done if we were together. It was a natural reaction. What else would be a natural reaction when we were together?

Olie and I had never had a chance to adjust to our breakup. She was across the country and suddenly, abruptly, she was out of my life. We didn't have the chance to learn how to be friends after the breakup, so having her back in my life felt like the day she'd left me. The hurt was still going strong. Love still lingered, but different.

Maybe having Olie back would be a good thing. If Kelly and I hurdled that bump in the road, we could move forward and have smooth sailing. And the what-ifs wouldn't haunt me for the rest of my life.

Logging on to the various Knight Fashion sites did little to get my mind off Olie. I hated myself a little as I searched for "Olivia Hunt."

Meet model @ModelOliviaHunt for our women's line #KnightFashion.

She didn't have many pictures posted, but the ones she had were gorgeous. Some of the pictures of her were from the runway, and some had been taken in a studio. Her information page held no indication of her being in a relationship.

Looking at pictures of her reminded me of the day we met. She and her friends had come to the restaurant where I worked. Her beautiful smile caught my eye first, and then the rest of her body. When her eyes lit up and she kept stealing glances at me, I knew I had her.

I recalled what she wore that day—jeans and a pink sweater. The pink accentuated her innocence and her cheeks. She would shy away every time our eyes met. Spending most of my time drooling over her, I might have dropped a glass or two. Judy had to snap me to attention a couple of times. She'd had a great laugh about that, too.

"Don't forget the other customers, Nathan," Judy sang out as she passed by on her way to tend to tables.

I smiled, feeling a slight warmth rise to my face, wishing the hostess had seated her on my side. "Don't worry," I replied, trying to figure out the best approach to asking for her number without breaking any employee policies or getting myself fired. Then I thought of an idea. It wasn't original, yet it was simple.

"Hey, Judy." I pulled her to the side. "Can you give this to that girl?" I handed her a take-out menu with my name and phone number on it.

"There are four of them. Which one?" she teased. She knew which one. Judy had noticed her ogling me, too.

I curled my lips into the smirk she loved. "You know which one."

"Dang, I hate it when you grin like that." She rubbed my face. "You're making me have wet fantasies right now. Bad!"

"Sorry." I shrugged. "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do."

She took it from me. "I'll give it to her. I'll also say a few words on your behalf. And by the way, her name is Olivia."

"You will?" I asked, feeling grateful.

"I've got your back, kiddo." She winked and left.

Judy left me standing there, wishing that girl could be mine. Olivia, I repeated dozens of times in my mind. What a beautiful name. I tried to ignore her when I passed by her table to tend to my side, but it wasn't working. My heart pounded against my chest in reaction to her. Her presence filled the room with flowers and sunshine.

When she laughed, it was like listening to my favorite love song. I didn't know her at all, but she already had a hold on me. How strange that an attraction could take you over completely. My mind was not my own at that moment. She had all of me right then. She owned me with her smile and her brown eyes twinkling every time she looked my way. From that day, I knew I wanted to marry her someday. I just knew.
Chapter Nineteen

Nathan

Kelly had come home late the night before. Since she would be shooting me at her studio, we decided to see each other there. It wouldn't be until later in the afternoon, but she needed to be at the studio early in the morning. When I got there, Kelly's assistant, Francis, greeted Jax, Josh, and me, and handed us our itineraries. I was to wear the suit by the dressing room with my name attached to it.

"Please go change. Kelly is in the other room with the other models," Francis directed.

The three of us went to our individual dressing areas and came out wearing the M. Knight suits. When the three of us walked out of the dressing room at the same time, I noted we were each wearing navy suits with different color ties—red for me, Josh's was lavender, and Jax's was magenta. We made small talk, but the conversation stopped when three women entered the room behind Kelly.

I spotted Kelly first and started to walk to her with a smile until...Olie caught my attention. We locked eyes and time stood still for a brief second. Her smile broke me out of her spell. I gave her a small smile, and not wanting to single her out, smiled at the other two models.

"Hey," Kelly said, giving me a kiss on my cheek. Her gentle caress on my arm let me know she'd missed me. That was all she'd give me, and I was grateful she hadn't full-on kissed me in front of Olie. That would have been awkward. Kelly did not know about Olie and stayed professional. But she also hugged Josh and Jax, which made the hug she had given me more natural, not a dead giveaway something was going on between us.

"Gentlemen," Kelly started to say, and shifted her attention, "This is Mady, Kei, and Olivia. After I do the individual shots, I'll be pairing you up."

I already knew who'd be paired up with whom by the color of their dresses. The women were stunning in their ball gowns.

After the individual shots, we waited for Kelly to set up for the next session.

"Olivia." Josh calling her name made me zone in on their conversation. "We're going to dinner afterward. Would you and your friends like to join us?"

Olie looked at me. I think she was asking for my permission. Then she gazed at her friends. When they nodded, she spoke. "Sure, we would love to. I know Kelly is busy, but I'll ask her, too. She has to eat dinner."

What? They were friends? How did they know each other? Oh, hell no! Things could get very complicated. It was true—in this industry everyone knew each other if they were at the top. Either way, Olie would have to find out sooner or later. I guessed this subtle approach to her finding out might be best instead of me telling her. She could see it for herself. But why did I care about how she might feel? She left me. I wasn't trying to be malicious or rub it in her face.

Kelly came back from the other room. "Please, follow me." She was always short and to the point, but I admired her professionalism and her talent.

The setup in the other room was amazing. Large vases with fake red roses were set on a table for four. A couple of background screens were behind us—one of Paris and the other of New York. I already pictured these photos in Knight Fashion Magazine.

"Olivia, you're with Nathan. Stand to the left of the table. Mady, you're with Josh. You guys get to sit. And Kei, you're with Jax. You're both to the right of the table." After we positioned ourselves, Kelly looked through her lens and started to click away, directing us. "Olivia, closer to Nathan. Put your arms around him. Nathan, put your arms around her waist. You're both acting shy." Kelly let out a snort.

Kelly had no idea. I didn't know how I would tell her. How would this affect their friendship? This is my job, I told myself, and pulled Olivia's body closer to me. How bad could it be, right? We were among others. We could keep this professional.

"Nate," Olie whispered. "Not too tight."

"Shit. Sorry." I backed away a little.

"You're okay with this, right?" she whispered.

"Sure," I lied. Holding her in my arms brought back the familiarity of us. Fortunately, the gown puffed out from the waist down, but the view of her cleavage from the strapless top didn't help. I'd had my hands on those beautiful breasts, my mouth on them. I'd licked and sucked and—

"Josh, pull back a little. Jax, a little to your left. Kei, good. Stay in that position. Mady, tilt your head up. Nathan, bring your head closer to Olivia. Put your left hand higher on her shoulder and the other around her waist, like you're going to kiss her." Not once did Kelly look up from her camera as she clicked away and guided us.

My pulse raced and nervousness settled in me. No big deal. I just needed to bring my lips closer to hers. I had thought if I limited my eye contact with Olivia, it would be okay, but it wasn't. How do you not look at the person you are holding? And how did I not look at the person whose scent made me want to place my face in the crook of their neck and take in every bit of that smell?

Olie's eyes showed no emotion; either that or I'd forgotten how to read them. No big deal, I kept telling myself, but how wrong I was. My heart hammered faster when my lips touched her cheek. Heat fused through my body so fast, I felt it surge to every nerve ending. It was so good to touch her, but at the same time, it burned. Pleasure and pain were mixed into one.

"Closer, Nathan," Kelly said. At that moment, as my lips slid lower and touched the corner of her hers, I was on the verge of losing it. My breathing became heavy as I fought the urge to kiss her, to take her lips into mine. It got worse when Olie hitched a breath and slightly shuddered in my arms.

"That's great, Nathan. Keep your eyes closed," Kelly ordered.

I didn't even realize my eyes were closed, but my hold on Olie had tightened. The strain on my muscles reminded me it was all for show, for the photos.

"Okay, good. Nathan, open your eyes and look at Olivia. Make eye contact and tilt your head a little to the side, and go really close, where your lips are almost touching."

Oh, she must be fuckin' kidding me. Nothing would happen, especially with Kelly there, but I couldn't trust myself, especially in this position.

I stared into her eyes, the eyes that had held my attention from the moment we'd met. They appeared different to me now. I knew her so well, yet at the same time, I didn't know her at all. I guessed a breakup could do that to a couple. The memories of the intimacy we had shared had never gone away, they were only locked up and buried. I only hoped I lasted through the session. Think of Kelly...Kelly...Kelly.

Olivia

When I saw Nate in that dark navy suit, my breath hitched as I took in his handsomeness. Josh and Jax looked debonair, too, but I was only interested in the one whose eyes could not break away from mine. His lustful eyes set greedily on me, gawking at me from head to toe. I knew he liked what he saw, and knowing Nate, he was having naughty thoughts. But then his eyes broke away to Kelly.

I didn't know Kelly well, but it was strange she would give him a kiss on the cheek. Maybe they were good friends? When I saw her hug Jax and Josh, I dismissed the possibility that Nathan and Kelly were a couple. If my initial hunch was true, I wouldn't be able to bear it. It was bad enough Nate had someone; it would kill me to know he was dating someone I knew.

When Kelly asked Nate to hold me closer, I knew my suspicions of their hookup had gone out the window, unless...he had never told her about me. There were two reasons why guys might not talk about their exes. One, it was too painful and they didn't want to share. Two, they wanted to forget about the ex completely and pretend it had never happened. I was not sure if any of my theory was valid.

After being back in his loving arms, even just for the photos, I didn't want to let go. He made me feel safe. He used to make me feel, as if no matter how difficult of a day I'd had, everything was going to be okay. Not only was he a great speaker, he knew how to listen. His actions spoke louder than his words. I loved that quality about him the most. He was my friend, my shelter, my rock, and I kicked myself again for throwing away what I'd had with him.

When Kelly told him to move his lips closer to mine as if we were about to kiss, I nearly fainted. The temptation to just take his lips—those supple, seductive lips I'd kissed many times—sent blazing heat through every inch of me, and the room suddenly became too hot to handle. Nate was killing me—this shoot was killing me. I'd done many sexy poses with other models before, but none had beaten this raw, animalistic desire for him to take me and fuck the hell out of me right then. Oh, God!

I tried to keep my frenzied heart to a steady beat, but it was impossible. His hot breath on my lips, his defined body trembling lightly under my fingertips, and his low, soft groan as if this was too much for him to bear, too, drove me crazy. I closed my eyes and squeezed them tighter when Nathan accidently touched his lips to mine. For a second there, our tongues grazed. My body exploded with lust and tiny fireworks burst across every inch of my pleasure zone. That simple erotic mess-up nearly made me orgasm right there in front of everyone.

Nathan's soft but ragged breath sounded tired or bored, but I knew the real reason. If I kissed him at that moment, he would kiss me back. I knew for sure it would happen because the chemistry between us was undeniable, burning hot enough to set this building on fire. Lost in each other's eyes, we were together in the studio, but everyone else ceased to exist.

That he still had feelings for me was clear. But would he leave the other person to risk a chance with me? Time would tell. We needed more time to be together. Hopefully, he would come over Saturday to help with the move. That might give us a chance to rekindle the good part of what we had.

"Done. Good job, everyone," Kelly said with exhilaration. "Nathan and Olivia, those were hot. You made them so believable, I was getting jealous." She laughed, fidgeting with her camera.

I wasn't sure what to make of what she had said, but something in the pit of my stomach told me I shouldn't go to dinner. The way Josh and Jax looked at the both of us and then to Kelly left a bitter taste in my mouth.

"I'm starving. Ready to go to dinner?" Mady asked, brushing through her ash-brown hair with her fingers.

"Sounds like a plan." Kelly smiled. "But first, you need to get out of those clothes. They don't belong to you. And I need to make sure they get back to Knight Fashion in one piece for Paris Fashion Week."

"We never get to keep them," Kei whined teasingly. "Maybe if we get stains on them they'll let us keep them." She snorted softly.

"My car or yours?" Kelly asked Nate.

Nate looked at me and then to Kelly. "I need to stop somewhere after dinner."

"Then I'll meet you there for now." She winked.

Kelly winked. Kelly winked at my Nate! And what the hell did "for now" mean? Oh, I didn't like this one bit, not one bit at all. To torture myself, I brooded over what was going on between them. A fling? Did they sleep together? Were they dating? Oh, fuck me!
Chapter Twenty

Nathan

I saw the shock on Olie's face when Kelly winked at me. Olie's wide-eyed look of dismay didn't go well with me. She was confused or hurt I thought, but I dismissed it. I had to stop worrying about her feelings. Again, she had left me. We'd moved on.

When we got to the Japanese restaurant, we sat in the back at a table for seven. Olie kept her distance from Kelly and me and sat between Kei and Mady. Josh and Jax gawked back and forth between Olie and me. Josh knew something was up in regards to Olie and me from the party. I wondered if he had told Jax. After our drinks were served, we ordered from the menu. We laughed and smiled as Kelly talked about her trip to Paris.

"I can't wait to go," Mady said, her brown eyes twinkling. "It will be my first time on the runway."

"Oh, you'll have an amazing time," Kelly said with elation. "I'm going to have to tag along with Nathan this time. After all, Paris is for couples."

"Paris is however you want to make it," Josh said, raising his glass.

"Of course it is," Jax added.

Everyone smiled or gave a short laugh except for Olie. I wasn't sure what compelled me to look at her, but she seemed to be elsewhere.

"You've been there at least a couple of times, right, Olivia? Correct me if I'm wrong." Kei leaned back in her seat to turn to Olie.

Olie looked up, finally realizing Kei was talking to her. Holding on to the glass as if it were her security blanket, and only half listening to our conversation, she said, "Sure. I mean, yes. I went twice for the shows."

"Didn't you go with...Gosh, what's his name?" Mady started to ask.

Olie stiffened and her face turned slightly pink. She didn't want me to know who she dated. Why that bothered me, I had no clue. We didn't need to share this information. I really don't care, I thought.

"Now I remember. Troy, one of the best photographers in this industry," Kei added. She shifted her attention to Kelly. "No offense, but you know what I mean. Some models will do anything to get a photo session with him."

"I bet, and don't worry, none taken." Kelly took a sip of her mango iced tea. "I heard he's got a terrible temper."

Jax rubbed his chin and crossed his arms. "I heard that rumor, too. I also heard he's slept with a lot of models."

Josh waggled his brows. "Lucky guy."

"Well..." Kei shrugged. "He's pretty hot. Even guys want to sleep with him." She giggled. "My friend tried. He got a nice punch in the face from Troy."

"Olivia would know," Mady threw in. "She dated him."

Olie blinked and sheepishly shrugged. Oh, hell no. She dated Troy? I'd heard of Troy and even saw a picture of him once. There were many rumors about him, and I'd wondered if they were true. I had to admit, he was a good-looking guy. But nothing good was ever said about him except that he was a well-known, talented, and highly sought-after photographer.

Olie leaving me and making me feel like I wasn't good enough had hurt my self-esteem, but to hear she dated a big-time photographer made me sick to my stomach. My ego was crushed. She wouldn't understand because it was a man thing. And the thought of him touching my Olie made me lose my appetite. I couldn't be mad at her, though. After all, I had slept with Kelly. But I'd had no idea they knew each other.

"I heard he has massive parties at his place, lots of drugs and alcohol," Kei stated, leaning in closer as if to hear a secret. "Is that true?"

"I..." Olie seemed hesitant to speak her mind. "He had one big party when I was dating him." Her tone trailed off as if she was uncomfortable with the topic. And so was I.

"How long did you see him?" Mady asked.

I wished people would stop talking about the subject. Obviously, Mady and Kei had no idea Olie and I had dated or they wouldn't be asking these questions. It was so awkward. Unless Olie and I got some things straight, there was no way we could hang out with the same circle of friends.

"Not that long," was all she said.

Mady must have caught on to her tone, realizing she didn't want to discuss this topic anymore, and changed the subject. "Kelly, it must be difficult being around hot models." She giggled.

Kelly turned to me with a smile, and then back to Mady. "I know. I have a tough job. It's so hard." She laughed. "But I have my eyes set on only one model. He's going to be the next Sexiest Man Alive." Kelly's lips curled as she gazed at me with her lustful eyes.

Josh leaned forward. "Sexiest? Nah. Maybe the dorkiest."

Everyone had a good laugh, except for Olie. She offered no smile or even a hint of a laugh. Olie tilted her head, allowing her hair to cascade down to cover half her face. Not only was she annoyed with this conversation, something else was bothering her big time. Her lips were in a thin line, focusing on Josh's shirt. Once in a while our eyes met, but she quickly turned away. Had she caught on that Kelly and I were dating?

"Well," Kelly chimed in. "Looks like dinner is about to be served." Beyond our table, the waitress approached holding a tray with our meals.

Olivia

I kept my eyes directly in front of me on Josh's shirt. He was wearing the Knight Fashion T-shirt with their logo on it that was given to all the models. It was the only thing keeping my eyes away from Kelly rubbing her hands over Nate's biceps. The curves of his arms were my favorite part of him, and she was...Her hands were where my hands should be.

I had concluded that Kelly was dating my Nate. I couldn't tell how long it had been or how serious it was, but it didn't matter. The thought that they'd slept together drove me crazy. While we waited for our dinner to be served, I pictured their naked bodies pressed together. And my heart shredded to pieces as I accepted that I didn't have a chance. It was probably too late.

If Kelly hadn't been good enough for Nate, I would have strategized my next move to try to win him back. But I would approve of him being with her if we weren't together, and that was exactly what was happening. But it hurt too much to see it happen in front of my eyes. I still loved him. And that fact was tearing my heart to pieces. Oh, God! I needed to get out of there. And Kelly—we were starting to get to know each other. We just had lunch the other day. I really liked our friendship. This was so messed up.

I was just about to use the restroom or make up an excuse to get some air when our meals came. Starving, I waited for the bento boxes to be placed in front of everyone so I could dig in. As I ate my dinner, I kept my eyes rooted to my meal. Eating was a good excuse to stay out of their conversation. Every time I looked up, my eyes went directly to Nate and Kelly. And seeing them as a couple made me sick to my stomach. I wanted to throw up, and I'd completely lost my appetite.

When Kelly fed Nate a salmon roll, I about died. That was my place. I used to feed him like that to be playful. The dagger in my heart deepened even more. Though she wasn't overly affectionate, Nate squirmed in discomfort with even the smallest degree of her public display. Every once in a while his eyes would shift to me. I surmised what he was thinking. I was probably the cause of his discomfort. He. Didn't. Want. Me. There. At that moment, I felt like a huge third wheel, even with our friends around. I didn't belong there.

When we paid the bill, which the waitress had been generous enough to split, I noted Nate paid for Kelly. I hadn't expected him to pay for mine, but that dagger twisted deeper. Another reminder he wasn't mine, another reminder he loved someone else.

My heart stung to the point I could feel its slow, aching beats. I couldn't breathe. I needed air. The walls started to close in and I got dizzy. Too many emotions were running through me, and...my phone buzzed. I picked it up when the caller ID read "Mom." She rarely called me because she didn't want to bother me during work hours. With my mom having a heart condition, I was on full alert.

I took my phone out of my purse and swung the straps over my shoulder. "It's my mom. I gotta take this call. See everyone later. I'll just take a taxi." I tried not to sound as frantic as I felt. Not waiting for anyone's reply, I answered the phone as I headed toward the door. Hopefully, it wasn't anything serious, but I blessed her for the perfect timing of her call.

"Mom. Are you okay?"

"I'm okay now," Mom said, sounding relieved.

"What did you say?" The traffic noise made it difficult to hear so I moved into the space between two buildings. Though the sound lessened, I had to cover my ear. "What happened?"

"I'm okay now," she repeated.

"What happened?" I reiterated, since she hadn't answered my question. Knowing she was fine eased my thundering heart, but my poor heart—she had given me a good scare.

"I fell down the stairs."

"What?" I had tried to stay calm, but I lost it at that point. "What do you mean you fell down the stairs?" Sometimes Mom was dramatic, but falling down the stairs was something I didn't take lightly. We didn't have stairs inside our place, but we had stairs up to the front door of the apartment building. But her "falling down the stairs" had a very different meaning from my "falling down the stairs." "Are you okay? Are you hurt? Do I need to come home?"

Sometimes I sounded like a mother. My older friends warned me when parents turned a certain age, we became the adults. I didn't understand it at first, but I learned. But sometimes, once in a while, like when I heard my mother's voice, I was a little girl again. I wanted to tell her I was hurting, that Nate was seeing someone, and he didn't love me anymore. I wanted to cry. My heart was full of agony, and I didn't know how to release it.

The hurt became a physical entity, gripping my heart so tightly it stole every bit of my oxygen, every bit of hope, and every bit of happiness. I was drowning in sadness, falling into a tunnel of darkness that owned me, sucked me into its hell, and I didn't know how to get out.

"No, I'm okay. I just wanted to tell you I fell a few steps and landed on my side, and I think I fractured my wrist. I can't move it. But I don't want to bother you. I can wait until you come home." Mom always put my needs first.

I sighed. Stay calm. It could have been worse. "Are you inside our home?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. I'll be right there. I'm done for the day." I wiped away a few teardrops that had come out of nowhere. "I'm hanging up, Mom."

I ended the call and turned in the direction of the street, slamming right into a body.

"Oh my God. I'm so sorry." I peered up when I noticed the toned chest and bicep under my hands...so strong. "Nate?" I said under my breath as I tried to calm my hammering heart. It went into overdrive just from the sight of him.
Chapter Twenty-one

Nathan

When Olie ran out of there, I had to know. What had been so urgent to make her dash out of there so fast? None of us had even had time to process what she'd said. And she wanted to take a taxi? Why couldn't she have gone back with Mady and Kei? They would've waited for her. Either finding out Kelly and I were dating had been too much for her to bear or something was really up.

After parting ways with everyone, which was right after Olie ran out, I went to find her. Out of habit, I was concerned for her. She was somewhat hunched over with one hand covering her ear and the phone in the other. I couldn't hear what she was saying, but I was concerned for her. I debated whether to stay, but didn't like the look of the dumpster near her. We were in an alley, and it didn't seem like a safe place for a woman to be alone, especially when it was dark.

I didn't want to be nosy so I turned away for a second, but then turned back when it sounded like she was talking to her mom and said something about falling down the stairs. She put the phone away and started walking back to the street with her head down until she ran into me. When I saw her coming, I thought she would stop, but she didn't. I ended up with her in my arms. The smell of her, the familiarity of her, had me high. It was only for a few seconds, and it wasn't enough. I wanted more. I wanted to drink her in, all of her. Then she backed away, as she should have. She had no idea who she'd crashed into.

"Nate?" she whispered, peering up at me with glassy eyes. Her tears made her eyes look like shiny, dark marbles. Why was she crying? The sound of her frail, vulnerable voice made me feel like shit. I should have told her about Kelly, but she could be upset about that or something else. Regardless, that was fucked up of me. I wouldn't have wanted to find out about Olie's love interest that way, but I had at the table today.

I had tried to keep a straight face and pretend I didn't care, but I did. I saw Troy's hands all over Olie's body where my hands should have been, where they used to be. Dinner hadn't agreed with me, but I ate it anyway, for show.

"Olie, are you okay?"

She released her hands, looking down to wipe her eyes and then back at me. "Yeah. It's just my mom. She fell down the stairs."

Panic slowly rose in me. "Is she okay? Do you need my help?"

Olivia couldn't meet my eyes.

"I'm not sure. She said she thinks she's fractured her wrist. I need to go." She tried to weave around me, but I stopped her. She still couldn't look at me.

"I'll drive you."

She looked at me with grateful eyes—those heavenly brown eyes I used to lose myself in. "It's okay. I can take a taxi. Shouldn't you be with...? I gotta go."

"Wait." I wrapped my arms around her waist the way I used to when she tried to move around me. The pull and tug between us caused our bodies to collide. We were in a similar position as the model shoot, with our lips so close. Temptation was killing me.

"I..." I sighed. My chest rose and fell. "I'm going to take you." Without thinking, I held her hand and led her to my car. Not until I opened the door for her did I realize what I had done.

Olivia

Nate held my hand like we had never broken up. My heart raced in a good way, and I didn't want to let go. But he let go—he let go when he opened the door for me. I sat quietly, but the whole time I wondered why he had taken my hand. Maybe out of habit. At least that was what I told myself. In that small space with him, I felt his every move, every glance, and every breath.

We drove in silence. Sometimes he looked at me and sometimes I glanced his way. We were never this silent for this long in the past. We would complain about our jobs and say things to support each other. And I found myself missing the good old days as I sat in his new car—another reminder Nate had moved on and maybe I didn't know him at all. But even though some things were different, deep down, Nate himself seemed unchanged. It was the new material things that made him seem unfamiliar.

I looked out the window and reminisced about our past.

"My feet are killing me," I whined in the car, taking off my low heels. Waiting tables left me exhausted, especially after being on my feet all day.

Nate kept one hand on the steering wheel and reached for mine with the other. Bringing it to his lips, he kissed the back of it and placed both our hands on his lap. "What else happened? Any annoying customers? Any guys try to pick you up?"

I didn't want to complain about my day when his day might have been just the same as mine or worse, but Nate always wanted to hear about mine first.

"Today was better than yesterday. And no one tried to pick me up." I giggled.

"Better not. I'll kick his ass." His territorial and aggressive side turned me on. "One day, baby, you won't need to work. I'll take care of you. Just have a little faith in me. I'll make something happen. I want the world for both of us."

I believed him. I could see how much he loved me in his eyes and his actions. Nate was a good man and came from a wonderful family. As for me, I'd never had a dad while I was growing up. I didn't know what it was like to have a man take care of you. Ever since I was old enough to get a job, I had worked to help my mom out. And I also enjoyed the freedom of having control of my own finances, or the lack thereof.

"What if I want to work?" I said.

"Then that will be your choice, but I'm going to make tons of money, baby. We won't have to struggle or live paycheck to paycheck. We'll live in a big house. Have lots of kids and dogs."

I laughed and teared up a bit. I knew he loved me, but I never knew he'd thought so far into our future. As for me, I just wanted to concentrate on one day at a time. One thing I had learned from my mom: prepare for the worst. Sometimes life throws you curveballs, and you have to make a choice. And sometimes you hurt the ones you love with that choice.

"How many children do you want?" I asked.

He looked behind his shoulder and when it was clear, he changed lanes. "Two or four."

I laughed. "Two or four?"

"Well, we only have two hands, so two ideally, just in case one of us has to take them somewhere alone."

"But you said four, too," I said, finding humor in this conversation.

"You and I have four hands together." He smirked. "Believe me, I came from a family of three and it sucked sometimes. Don't get me wrong, I love them, but sometimes one of us was the oddball."

"Hmmm, good point. What if I want cats?" I asked.

He threw me a quick glance and looked back to the road ahead. "Then we'll have to get a divorce." Nate waited for a second then turned back as we laughed together. I knew he was teasing, but the idea of us broken up was a horrendous thought. "Then we'll have cats, too," he added, grimacing. "Anything for you, baby." He gave me a killer wink, the kind of wink that brought lots of naughty thoughts into my mind. Then Nate squeezed my hand. "I would give you the world if it made you happy and I won't let anything get in our way of happiness. It's you and me, forever, Olie."

His words melted me into a state of euphoria. I always felt like I was on top of the world with him. "You and me, forever," I repeated softly, soaking in his words. Then I changed the subject. "How was your day?"

He flashed his eyes to the rearview mirror and then to the left of him before he changed lanes. "The same. The usual. Nothing special or new."

"So what you're trying to tell me is every female customer was gawking at you? Staring at your fine ass, your six-pack, and your beautiful face?"

"Yeah, like I said...the usual." He shrugged.

I chuckled. "Well then, I guess I'll have to kick some asses. Just remind Judy you're mine, and she's not to lay a finger on you. She can look, dream about you, and wish you were hers, but that's all. No touching. It's sexual harassment, anyway."

Nate rubbed my hand and slid his fingers through mine so they melded together perfectly as one. His hand made love to mine. "We're almost at your place, but I don't want to take you home. Right now, I want to make love to you and show you that you're the only one on my mind, always."

His words turned me on so much I was already wet. I was ready to strip down naked, unzip his pants, and sit on top of him in the car. "My mom will be asleep. I'll sneak you into my room."

Nate raised an eyebrow, and his mind and body were already in my bedroom. "Are you sure?"

I nodded with certainty. No guy had ever been in there before, but Nathan was not just any guy. I loved him, and I had never felt this strongly about any other guy.

The phone ringing broke me out of my thoughts. I reached inside my purse and answered without looking at the caller ID. My mind was so deep in thoughts of Nathan, I had forgotten where I was or what I was doing.

"Hello?"

"Why aren't you answering my calls?" Troy asked in his angered voice.

I regretted not checking it before I answered. Troy was scaring me. I'd asked him not to contact me, saying we needed space, but he wouldn't listen. He had no regard for my wants and wishes. At least he was in New York.

I peeked at Nate from the corner of my eye before I answered. "I can't talk right now."

"What the fuck do you mean you can't talk right now?" Troy's voice was so loud, I had to pull the phone away from my head. Big mistake. Nate flashed his eyes at me without a word. Crap. He was going to ask questions. "You never answer the phone. Are you with someone?"

"No," I lied.

"You better not be. We're not over until I tell you it's over."

"I have to go," I said calmly, though my heart pounded against my chest. I should have ended the call the second I heard his voice, but I didn't think quick enough.

"Goddamn it, if you don't get your ass over here, I'm coming to you. It's your choice," he continued.

My face flushed with heat while my lungs constricted until I couldn't breathe. I tried to remain calm, but when Nate glanced my way with concern again, I didn't know what else to do.

"I'll call you and we'll fix this." I didn't want to talk to him, but I also didn't want to piss him off even more. I hung up the phone and looked out the window.

"Is everything okay?" Nate asked hesitantly.

No, I wanted to scream, but I couldn't. It wouldn't be fair of me to tell him about Troy. Why would he want to listen? I didn't even want to know about Kelly. I wanted Nathan to hold my hand and tell me how he would make it all go away, like he had done countless times before. But that wasn't going to happen.

"Everything is fine," I lied.

When he frowned, I knew he didn't believe me, but thankfully he didn't pursue it. I wasn't sure what I would say, or if I would break into tears.

What the hell has happened to me? I had thrown away something precious and got what I deserved for thinking my career was all that mattered. Though I wouldn't admit it out loud, deep down inside, I might have thought I could do better than Nate. My 'better' had turned out to be a nightmare. He might even be the destruction of Nate and me, if there had even been a possibility of rekindling what we had. Getting back together obsessed me. It wasn't fair of me to think such thoughts, but I wanted back what was once mine.
Chapter Twenty-two

Nathan

Olie lied to me. Everything wasn't fine. I knew her expressions as well as my own. On top of that, I had heard the loud, demanding male voice on the other end. Something troubled her, but I didn't pursue it. If she didn't want to tell me then it was her prerogative.

I reminded myself again she wasn't mine; Olivia wasn't my responsibility anymore. Whatever was happening in her life was hers to deal with, but I wanted to know. I used to know everything about her day-to-day business—how she felt, what she was doing—and hell, I even knew what color G-string she was wearing. She would text me the color because I would ask. We were playful and silly that way. But not anymore.

The remainder of the ride was quiet and awkward. I was glad when we arrived shortly afterward. Any longer and I might have gone crazy. I wanted to know who yelled at her. Even when Olie and I had gotten into fights, I never disrespected her like that. We would talk about it like adults. Then I recalled her saying she wasn't seeing anyone. Had she gotten back together with Troy? I had to stop thinking. It was none of my business.

After we got out of the car, we went up the stairs to the front door of the apartment. Memories of nights of kissing her and holding her right in this very spot came to my mind. We were so happy then.

"Thank you for driving me," Olie said, giving me half a smile. Her eyes were sad, making me feel the same.

"You're welcome. Glad I could help. Let's go in and make sure your mom is okay and then I'll leave." I gestured my head toward the door. The words came out more like a demand.

"Okay." She inserted the key and opened the door.

We walked on a polished caramel-colored floor. To the left and right of the wall by the elevators were mailboxes. I pushed the elevator button and it opened. An elderly woman stepped out, and it took me a few seconds to recognize her dark, curly hair and those green eyes. She looked older than the last time I'd seen her, with defined wrinkles in her forehead.

"Nathan?" Her eyes gleamed in excitement to see me. "It's been so long. Come here and give me a hug."

I'd known Charlene almost as long as I'd known Olie's mother. They were the best of friends. I leaned down to give her a hug. "How are you?" I asked, pulling back.

When Charlene had lost her husband to colon cancer about three years before, she had visited Olie's mother frequently.

"I'm good as can be. It's been so long." She shifted her attention to Olie and gave her a hug, too. Then she glanced back and forth between us. "I'm so glad you two are back together. Olivia's mother used to tell me how Olivia would cry on the phone because she missed you so much."

"We're not—" I started to say before she began spreading rumors.

"I always knew you two would get back together. True love never dies, no matter the distance," she continued.

Olie covered half her face with her hand, turning red. "Charlene, we're just friends."

Charlene leaned in, frowning. "Why?" She shook her head, looking disappointed. "I can tell you still love each other. Friends? You can truly never be friends once you've been in love." She extended her arms and pulled both of us close to her face. I thought she was going to make us kiss or she was going to kiss us. The conversation had turned strange. Instead, it ended up being a group hug. "I've been there. Done that. Don't waste time trying to be friends. Have sex. Then you'll really know if you want to rekindle or not. Have a great day. By the way, your mom is fine." She released us and then slowly walked away.

I pushed the button for the elevator again. A tiny sound escaped Olie's mouth. When we stepped inside the elevator, she covered her mouth as she burst out into a loud laugh.

"Did she just say 'have sex?' I can't...Oh my God." She covered her face for a second, then looked back up at me with her brown eyes twinkling and a beautiful smile, the smile I'd fallen in love with.

I nodded to answer, still staring at her smile. Her laugh was contagious. I shrugged and laughed along with her. "Do you think we'll speak our mind like that when we're older?" I asked, shaking my head, still in disbelief at Charlene's words.

"I know we will." She pressed her hands on my chest, peering up at me with her tongue sticking out sideways. It was a dorky smile, but it was one I'd seen many times before. It used to make me smile, and it still did. When she realized her hands were on my body, she backed away. "Sorry."

"It's okay." I smiled to let her know it was no big deal.

The ride up to the fifth floor was quiet after that. When the door opened, I didn't follow her out.

"Charlene said your mom was fine, so I should go."

She blinked. "Well, since you're already here, can you say hi to my mom? If Charlene tells her you stopped by and she didn't get a chance to see you, she might give me an earful."

"Okay, but I'm just going to say hi and leave. I won't be staying." This seemed so wrong. Olie and I needed time to be friends. I shouldn't be at her place. Then I remembered I had offered to help her move on Saturday.

Olie opened the door. Emily was in my line of vision. Her brown eyes grew wide in utter shock. She seemed tired but still looked great for her age. Though I'd never seen a photo of Olie's father, to me she resembled her mom, and she must have gotten her height from her dad. It looked like Emily was going to cry. She covered her mouth as she came toward me.

"Nathan." Her words came out as a whisper. "It's been ages."

When I embraced her, my heart sank to my stomach. Since my mom lived out of state, in a way, Emily had become my mom. Every so often, Emily would make us dinner, and then Olie and I would go see a movie or go out, just the two of us. Once in a while, we would stay home and watch Netflix with Emily. I didn't realize how much I had missed her until now.

"Emily. How have you been?" I glanced around the white walls I'd seen many times before. The few paintings on the walls were the same, as were the brown sofa and other furniture. The cozy, two-bedroom apartment remained exactly the same. There were even photos of the three of us on the side table by the sofa, exactly where I had last seen them. I was touched that they hadn't taken them down.

Emily pulled back to look at me. Her hands were still on my arms. "You look good." She patted them. I towered over Emily, but she made me feel like a child sometimes by the tone she used. "It looks like you lost a little weight. I need to feed you. Come."

"I—"

"I won't take no for an answer." She tugged me to the dining room and pulled out a chair for me. Seeing her happy made it difficult to say no to her.

"Thanks." I smiled.

"Mom, we already had dinner. And how's your wrist? We rushed over because I thought you were hurt." Olie followed behind her. "We ran into Charlene. She told us you were fine."

Emily stopped in her tracks. "I told you I was fine and I could wait until you came home." She looked at me, rolling her eyes. "Sometimes, Olivia doesn't hear me. And she certainly didn't listen to me when I told her to call you. All those nights she would whine on the phone about how she missed you. I told her to call you, but she thought you should call her."

"Mom. Stop," Olivia huffed. "This is not your place to interfere."

"It is when it comes to your well-being." She disappeared into the kitchen.

"I'm so sorry." Olie ran her hand down her face with a groan. "She's just rambling and saying things."

Hearing she had missed me didn't make me feel better. It saddened me that we'd let pride stand in our way. I had thought about calling her every day for the longest time, and because of my ego, I couldn't pick up that damn phone to save my life.

"It's okay," I said. "I'll stay for—"

Emily came back with what looked to be my favorite dessert. She looked so proud as she served it to me. "I guess my intuition knew you were going to visit me. I made your favorite dessert."

Emily's key lime pie was to die for. I had gained weight before from eating her pie twice a month. I would practically eat the whole thing. Then she would let me take the leftovers home, and I would eat it for breakfast. It was that delicious.

"You have no idea how much I missed your pie," I said, picking up the fork she placed beside the plate.

She patted my shoulder. "Good. Eat up. And you have no idea how much my pie missed you." She laughed. "I'm going to leave you two alone. Olivia didn't tell me you were back together. This is such wonderful news. This makes me very happy. I'll be in my room if you need me." With that she walked away.

"Mom...we're not together." Olivia started to say, lightly smacking her head. "Sorry."

"It's okay. Just tell her when I'm gone," I said. I didn't want to break her heart. This only confirms I shouldn't have come, but holy shit, this dessert is melting my tongue.

Olie left me to eat while she went to her room. After I had finished the slice, I went toward her door to knock and let her know I was leaving. There was a lot of 'I shouldn't have done this today' trepidation. When my knuckles were just about to make contact with the door, I caught a peek of Olie. Seeing her only in a red G-string and red bra brought back memories of us on her bed.

I had brought Olie home late one night after we'd been to a nightclub. We didn't go often. We were usually homebodies, but it was the birthday of one of Olie's friends, so we didn't have a choice. It must have been almost two o'clock in the morning when we arrived at her place. I had to invite myself in to take a piss.

When I came out of the bathroom, Olie started to unzip her dress. Instead of letting her finish it on her own, I closed her bedroom door and walked up behind her. After I lightly pushed her onto the bed, her stomach flat down on the covers, I bent down and starting kissing her ankle. I slowly moved up, taking my time, savoring every inch of her long legs. Sometimes I used my tongue, and sometimes I nipped her playfully with my teeth.

"What are you doing?" she giggled, and then moaned into her blanket so her mother wouldn't hear. She knew exactly what I was doing.

"I'm going to be the first and last to de-virginize your bed."

Olie had told me she'd never brought a guy to her room before. In her mother's eyes, none of them had been good enough to be invited back, except for me.

"I like the sound of that." Her words came out like gasps as I moved farther up.

When my lips reached her inner thigh, just by her panties, she quivered, and her leg muscles became rigid. The quivering was just the beginning. I began to move my tongue around the curve of her ass, letting it slide under her panties and bathing her clit. She lay there, not moving but moaning softly, making my lust grow. While holding her legs with my hands, I flicked, sucked, and nipped her clit with my tongue.

"Nate," she panted. "You're killing me." She got up without my consent and pulled me up. "I want to know what I taste like." Her lips dove into mine like a hungry wild animal. Our kiss maddened fiercely just before she pulled my shirt over my head and started to unbuckle my pants.

"No," I said. "I want to take my time." My words were final. I knew she had surrendered to my wishes when she gave me a sexy smile. Turning her so she faced the wall, I slowly unzipped her dress. My kisses followed the zipper along her back and past her ass. I took a step back to watch her dress fall, revealing a beautiful body I was going to conquer—that body I knew so well, the body that was mine. With her heels still on, she was a to-die-for sexy vision.

After I pulled down her G-string and her bra, I guided her hands to plant them against the wall with her legs spread apart. While I sucked the side of her neck, I whispered, "Don't move. You belong to me. I'm going to make you feel so good, you'll be begging for more."

I took the condom out of my pocket, took my pants off, then my shoes, and slipped the condom on my hard cock. Feeling her sex to make sure she was ready for me, I discovered she was wetter than before. Her sex was begging and taunting me.

Olie gasped and moaned with pleasure when I entered her from behind. She turned her face to the side with her cheek pressed against the wall. Her hands had become fists planted there, as well. She panted harder the faster I slammed into her. I moved my hands from her waist to her breasts and squeezed them to the rhythm of my fucking her.

"Oh, fuck, Olie," I whispered. Hopefully, her mother was deep asleep. I would die if she heard us.

"Nate. I feel so weak. I can't stand anymore."

The harder I fucked, the harder we breathed. My body floated in a state of ecstasy, feeling light as a feather. I pulled out of her and turned her around. Our lips clung to each other again as I sucked her tongue, her lips, and everywhere my lips fell on her face. Somehow we got on the bed, and then I fucked her again until she couldn't take it anymore. Of course, she didn't scream my name, but she did it through her eyes and by the way her nails dug into my shoulders and down my arms as she arched her back.

My will had been spent and I lost it as we came together. "I love you," I whispered into her ear. I collapsed beside her and pulled her to me. Holding her in my arms, I relished how our bodies pressed together like they never wanted to be apart. Our breathing was hot and heavy, and I loved to hear every single sound of our lovemaking.

Olie completely undone gave me the satisfaction of knowing I'd not only taken care of my needs, but her needs, too. I always made sure my partner's needs were met, but with Olie it wasn't an obligation, it was a pleasure. I loved kissing, touching, and exploring every inch of her body. I'd had a handful of insignificant dates, but with Olie it was different. Special. At that moment, I knew I wanted her in my life forever.
Chapter Twenty-three

Nathan

"Nate?"

My eyes met Olie's as she covered herself with crisscrossed arms. My hand darted to the back of my neck while I looked down.

"Sorry, I didn't know you were changing. I wanted to let you know I was leaving." I backed away from her view.

"Give me a second. I'll walk you out." I heard the sound of a drawer opening and closing.

"It's okay. I need to go to. I promised Kelly I would stop by." Maybe I shouldn't have said that. It became dead silent. She stopped moving. I stopped moving. Silent—so silent I could hear the refrigerator humming.

I blinked when the door opened a bit more and Olivia's face popped out. She didn't look upset or mad. In fact, I couldn't read her expression. "Can you do me a favor?"

"What is it?" I asked, concerned.

"Can you not tell Kelly about us? I don't know her that well. It will make things awkward, especially when the three of us will be working together."

I had planned on telling Kelly soon, but maybe Olie was right. Who knew how long any of this would last, anyway? "Okay," I agreed. "But I'll have to tell her soon."

"Thanks. Could you close the door behind you?"

"Sure. Can you tell your mom I said thanks and that it was good seeing her?"

"I will." She paused as if to gather her thoughts. "You don't have to come this Saturday. We're not moving. But thanks for the offer."

I nodded, but I could have stuck out my tongue at her and she wouldn't have noticed. She wasn't making eye contact. Was she lying?

With that, she shut the door. I took it as though she wanted to shut me out of her life, but I was probably reading too much into it. And why did I care? I didn't want to care, but I did. I needed to get out of there, but instead of hauling my ass out of the house, my hand and my head flattened against Olie's door as if I could touch her. I inhaled a deep breath as I closed my eyes, trying to let go of her. If I wasn't mistaken, I heard a light tap on the door, as if she had placed her hands there, too.

I didn't like the distance between us. It felt so wrong. Yet, I knew it had to be that way if we were to truly move on with other people. Clearly, she had at one point with Troy. Maybe there still was something there, but they were having troubles from the sound of the phone conversation. She wouldn't tell me who was on the other line, but I wasn't stupid. All I cared was that Troy wasn't being a dick to Olie. No matter how I felt, she deserved happiness, too.

The floorboards creaked with every step I took in the still house. I stopped by the dining table to get one last bite of her pie when I spotted the continual flashing of Olivia's phone. Olivia had turned off the ringer, but someone was trying to reach of her. It was none of my business, but the phone happened to be there, and I couldn't resist.

It was Troy. He had left tons of messages for her. They must have gotten into a fight.

Five seconds ago: Call me right now!

Five minutes ago: Where are you?

Ten minutes ago: Are you with anyone?

Twenty minutes ago: You better fuckin' call me.

I stopped scrolling. Again, none of my business, but he sounded pretty obsessive. Shutting the light off, I closed the door behind me, making enough noise for Olie to hear. I didn't leave. I couldn't until I knew the door was locked. After ten seconds, and I counted, it clicked. That sound might as well have been the off button to my heart, 'cause I didn't want to feel anything. Not one damn thing. Torn between two women—one from my past who should have been my future, and one in the present who could be my future if I gave her a chance. But that was the thing—I didn't know which way to go. Do I even have a choice?

Olivia

I pressed my head and hand against the door as if to touch Nate. Not hearing any footsteps made me suspect he might still be standing by it. I didn't mean to shut the door on him, but I couldn't stomach the thought of him going to see Kelly. It certainly meant they were serious. Again, I was assuming, but everything just added up to the same conclusion.

What I told Nate had been a lie. The moving plan was still on, I just didn't want him there. There was no way I could spend all day with him and pretend we were fine. It had been bad enough trying to make it through the photo session. Spending all day with him outside work would have been a constant reminder he wasn't mine anymore.

After what seemed like a while, footsteps led away and left me in the quiet. Shit! I left my phone on the dining table. Had he been looking at it? Why would I think he would do that? Maybe he had taken another bite of his favorite pie. I was being paranoid, but I didn't want him to get the wrong idea if he scrolled through my phone. The phone call I had received earlier in the car had gotten his attention. He had to be curious.

I let out the breath I had been holding when the front door closed. Coming out of my bedroom, I turned the light back on, tippy-toed to the front door, and turned the knob to lock it. When I turned around, my heart fell out of my chest as I jumped back.

"Mom? What are you doing? Don't scare me like that." I held my chest with both hands, as my heart found a steadier beat.

"I'm so sorry, Olivia. I was so embarrassed, I stayed in my room. You should have warned me he was coming, and you should have told me you weren't back together."

I guided my mom to the sofa and sat next to her. "Sorry. It wasn't planned. And you're right. I should have called you, but he was with me the whole time." The whole thing frustrated me almost to the point of tears.

Mom wrapped her arms around me tightly. "You should tell him how you feel. He doesn't know, does he?"

"I can't. It's no use. He's seeing someone else." The words poured out of me, and saying it out loud confirmed what I already knew. It hurt and the ache was growing. Every time I saw Nate, I'd know he was going to hold someone else in his arms. The thought made me unravel into jealousy and bitterness.

Mom dropped her hands and turned to get a face-to-face view of me. "Maybe it's not that serious. I could tell he still cares about you. If he didn't, he wouldn't have come."

I sniffed. "It's complicated." When Nate and I broke up, I had told Mom a white lie. To me, it was between Nate and me. Maybe I didn't tell her because I knew she would try to change my mind. It had been my decision to make, and I didn't want anyone talking me out of going after my goal.

Finding the courage, I told her everything: How Nate had become a model, how we had been scheduled to do a shoot together, and how he was dating one of the photographers. Mom never knew Nate had proposed to me. Even while I was telling her, I still firmly believed he had proposed to keep me there with him.

Mom shook her head the way she always did when she disagreed with me. "I can't believe you said no. You picked your career over the man you loved. I understand why you did it, but you loved Nathan. Olivia, I'm sorry. I'm your mother, but I'm on Nathan's side. You hurt him really bad. But regardless, you two have a strong past. I still think you should tell him. Who knows, maybe he's waiting for you to tell him you still love him? After all, you left him."

I sighed. "I...I don't know. And I sort of know the girl he's dating." I wanted to turn back the clock. I loved my career, but without someone to share my happiness, the sacrifice didn't seem worth it.

This time, Mom sighed. "Again, I don't know this person, but you're my daughter and I care about you. I say you need to tell him. He needs to know. At least you'll know you've done all you could. Don't look back and regret not telling him. The past could haunt you till your dying day. Is that what you want?"

"No." I bit the inside of my mouth in frustration. I leaned into my mom's shoulder like I'd done many times before when I needed her guidance and support. She always knew the right things to say.

Mom wrapped her arm around me and stroked my hair. "Don't be alone like me, Olivia."

I pulled away from my mom to look at her. "You've got me, Mom. I know I've been away, but it was to start my career. Now that I'm established, I can pick and choose my projects."

"You know what I mean."

I nodded. "Why didn't you date or get remarried?"

Mom looked at her hand and then back to me. "I don't know. I was busy, working. And before I knew it, I was old."

I grasped her hand in mine. "You're still beautiful, Mom. I don't think there's an age limit as to when you should stop trying to find someone special."

"At my age, I think we just look for companionship. And to tell you the truth, a part of me thought your dad would come back to us." Tears started to pool in her eyes. "I thought maybe he would grow up and realize he has a family, and he would come home. If I remarried, or if I was dating someone, then I wouldn't have room for your dad."

"Oh, Mom." I rubbed her hand as if I could ease the burden in her heart. "You've been waiting for Dad all these years?" I sighed.

She nodded, pulling back her hand to wipe her eyes. "So don't be like me. It's not easy to love someone deeply. Love doesn't come about easily. I never hooked up with anyone else because I couldn't see myself with anyone else. I loved your dad with all my heart and soul. And I know you love Nathan more than you tell yourself or will admit. You need to let him know, or you will always regret you didn't. The longer you wait, the harder it will be for him to leave the other woman."

Knowing she was right, I inhaled deeply and then got up. "It's getting late. We should go to bed." I helped my mom up and she went back to her room as I retrieved my phone off the dining table.

Shit. Nate had scrolled through my phone. He knew my password. I hadn't changed it; there was no need to. When I checked the texts I thought Nate had read, I was relieved Isla sent the first text, and I'd missed a call from her, too. We'd been texting here and there, but never a phone call. I made a mental note to call her back. Sighing with relief that it had been Isla, I continued to scroll through the rest, which grew increasingly mortifying. Troy had sent me several dozen messages. Had Nate read all those obsessive texts? Disregarding Troy's, I scrolled back up to Isla's while I went back to my room.

Isla: Call me if you can.

She was three hours ahead. When I looked at the clock, it was past midnight Eastern time, but Isla always liked to sleep late. The text had come only a few minutes before. Pressing the call button, I slipped inside the covers.

"Olivia. Hey."

"Isla, is everything all right?" I said, panicking.

"Yeah. Why aren't you asleep? You're an early bird."

"I got your message and I got worried."

"I wanted to tell you the good news."

"What good news?" I asked, feeling relief.

"M. Knight's women's line of swimsuits and underwear offered me a contract. Can you believe it? I'd rather wear their fancy clothes, but oh well, I can strip down." She snorted.

"That's great. So does that mean you're coming out here?" I snuggled against my pillow.

"I'm planning to arrive next week. I want at least a week to go shopping and relax. I'm only going to be there for a month, so I'll ask Michelle and Darcy to check up on our place. Do you know how long you'll be there? I'll feel bad if you keep paying the other half of the rent when you don't even live here."

I sighed softly so she couldn't hear. Isla was right, but I wasn't sure how long I'd be in LA since I had only been signed for one project. That was the problem with these types of contracts. "Let's just wait another month. Either they will offer me a full contract or fire me." I shrugged, even though she couldn't see me.

"Okay. I'm glad you still want to be my roommate, but again, I feel bad that I have the whole apartment to myself for half the price." She paused. That pause told me something else had happened. "Olivia..." She said my name as if she was going to be the messenger of bad news. "Troy came by several times, demanding to know where you are."

My hand flew to my forehead. "I'm so sorry you had to deal with him."

I could hear the low background noise of the TV. "I really think you should get a restraining order. I don't care who he is, and I don't care that he's across the country from you, but he scares me. Seriously, Olivia."

I sighed again, feeling my chest rise to the ceiling and fall. "He's all talk and no action. He threatened to come get me. He doesn't even know where I live in LA. Did you tell him?"

"Hell no," she bellowed. "I told him if he didn't leave the premises, I would call the cops."

"I'm going to call him and take care of this. I just took off. Maybe he needs some kind of closure." I already had enough to deal with. "I have to fly back to New York in two weeks, anyway. Before the Knights, I got a deal with Zena. I could take that time to talk to him. I need him to understand it's over, like, really over. But you're coming here. Maybe we can go back home together."

She huffed. "I'm not sure if that's a good idea. If you do, make sure I'm here, but I'll be in my room. Just in case. And that sounds like a plan. We can come back together."

"Okay, but he's never hurt me. He just has a temper. He..." I didn't want to talk about him anymore. "How are you? Everything okay?"

"Yeah. Everything is fine. I just miss not seeing your face every day."

"I miss you, too," I said somberly. It was true, that old saying "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

"Hey, did you ever get a chance to meet up with Kelly?" she asked.

I growled softly. "You're never going to guess what happened." I told Isla everything about Nate and about Nate and Kelly. I was glad Isla and Kelly were more of acquaintances than friends.

"Oh, no way." Isla let out an ironic laugh. "What are you going to do?"

"There is nothing I can do. I let him go. I broke my own damn heart. I did this." I took a deep breath, thinking of how I could have done things differently.

"Don't worry, my friend. Isla is coming."

For some reason, her tone seemed mischievous. I knew that tone. She was already scheming in her mind.

"Well, I better let you go. Talk to you soon. Text me the info for your flight. I'll pick you up at the airport," I said, feeling my heavy heart and my eyes dropping. It had been a long day. "And where are you staying? Do you need to crash at my place? It's only Mom and me."

"Thanks for the offer, but my brother's family lives in LA. I should spend some time with my nieces since I don't head to LA often. Talk to you soon."

With that, our conversation ended, leaving me to think about Nate as I fell asleep.
Chapter Twenty-four

Nathan

"Where have you been?" Kelly scolded playfully, letting me in. "It's late. Didn't you get my text?"

I brushed my hair back while entering and sat on the sofa. "Sorry. I was held up. I didn't bother to look at the phone until I was on my way."

"What were you doing?" she pressed, sitting next to me.

It was a natural question, but with us only dating a few months, I didn't think she had the right to ask. Maybe I thought this way because Olie had asked me not to say anything to Kelly. My irritation wasn't Kelly's fault, so I changed the subject.

I wrapped my arms around her, bringing her close to me. "I'm just curious. How long have you and Olivia been friends? And how do you know Mady and Kei?" I threw the other two names in so she wouldn't focus on Olie.

"Why? You think she's pretty?" she challenged.

Sometimes women were unpredictable. They liked to test you, and if you didn't say the right words, they got all huffing mad.

"I'm just curious, that's all."

"I'm just starting to get to know Olivia. We were introduced through mutual friends. I helped Olivia get her job. My friend, Michelle, who's also a model, sent me photos of Olivia and Isla. Sometimes some of the nice models go out of their way for their friends. I sent those photos to Matthew Knight. Olivia got the job for Knight Fashion, and Isla got one for Cosmo. That's the story."

"Oh," I said, feeling relieved that they were more of acquaintances. Not wanting her to find out from another source that Olie and I had been serious, I'd thought about telling her right away. But since I had promised Olie I wouldn't just yet, I bit my tongue. I planned to keep it quiet, but wanted to let her know very soon. If we were to continue our relationship, Kelly had to know. There shouldn't be any secrets between us.

Using my charm, my fingers crawled up her arm. "What have you been doing while I was gone?"

Kelly swung her legs over and straddled me. "Playing with myself. Waiting for you." She ran her fingers through my hair, sending shivers through my veins. She waggled her brows and bit her bottom lip playfully.

Her words turned me on as I pictured her doing this. I had never made love to Kelly. Instead, we fucked the hell out of each other. We were both hesitant with commitment, me more than her, but it worked perfectly. Sex with no strings attached. We hadn't even discussed if we were exclusive. I assumed we were since we saw each other often.

"I'd like to see you do it," I growled, and picked her up and took her to her bedroom.

I woke up in my room the next day and went to work. Never having spent a night at Kelly's place, the previous night wasn't a good time to start, no matter how tired I was. Spending a night at someone's place means commitment, and I wasn't ready for that. Though I'd never slept over at Olie's place, the reason being her mom, she had slept over at mine plenty of times.

"Good morning, Mr. Cross," Mrs. Ross said. I liked to hear my name and know the admin assistant knew me. "I saw your picture in the magazine. How does that feel?" Her eyes raked over me, probably imagining me shirtless.

"I've taken many. Which one?" I probed.

Her cheeks flushed. "The one with you not wearing...a shirt...you know?"

I nodded. Yup, that was the one I assumed she meant. I had to admit, I looked damn good and it was all me. No computer-generated bullshit needed.

"Yes, I remember that one." I winked at her.

I didn't know cheeks could turn that red.

She cleared her throat, releasing her stare on me, and said, "Hmm...Are you here for the meeting?"

"Yes."

"You're ten minutes early. They're in the meeting room next to Matthew's office." She pointed down the hall even though I knew the way. I'd been there plenty of times before.

"Thanks. See you later."

She finally looked at me. "See you later." Her tone came off as flirty. I smiled. It was all for fun and she knew it. If she thought she could make me blush, she had another thing coming. I only held back to be professional. When I glanced back over my shoulder, she waved at me. Yeah, she checked out my ass. I purposely wiggled it more just to be a dork and make her laugh.

When I opened the door, Josh and Jax were already in the meeting room and seated.

"Hey," they both greeted.

"Hey." I gestured with my head and then sat next to Josh.

"I think it's just the three of us," Jax said.

"Cool." I leaned back to enjoy the view of the city outside the window. I liked how all the rooms had a great view. "How's your family?" I asked Jax.

"Good. Thanks for asking. Rachel is on bed rest for a bit. We had a scare, but she's all good."

"Good," I said, and I meant it. Jax and Josh were both great guys. I was lucky to have their friendship. But right now, they were staring at me as if I had a secret to tell. "What?" I shrugged. "You need to give me bad news or something? Did I get fired?" I let out a soft chuckle, but it wouldn't be a laughing matter if I was.

"No." Josh shook his head. "Want to tell us what's going on between you and Olivia and you and Kelly?"

I shook my head and sighed. "It's that obvious?" I asked.

Jax swung his chair in my direction. "Yeah. Especially during dinner, but from the looks of it, I don't think Kelly had a clue."

I ran my hand down my face and then back up. "Kelly doesn't know yet, so can you just keep it between the three of us? Olivia and I are complicated, but I think it's over."

Josh tapped his fingers on the table. "You think?"

Did I just say I think? "I meant, it's over." I narrowed my eyes at his smiling face, which mocked me.

"Well, it didn't seem that way to me," Josh sang out. "I sat across from Olivia and I saw all her expressions. She couldn't hide it. She was clawing her nails into Kelly."

I leaned back and swung the chair in close to the table. "Was she?" I didn't know why I found this humorous. Finding out Olie was jealous of Kelly kind of made my day, no matter how sick that was of me.

Jax released a heavy sigh. "Believe me. I don't envy your position. That's gotta be tough."

I didn't agree or disagree. Instead, I stared at the wall, hoping all the answers would somehow appear. Sitting back up, I said, "Sorry, Jax. I heard about your ex, Chloe. Wow, she's a piece of work."

Jax sighed. "I almost let her destroy my happiness all because I felt sorry for her and she is Jace's mom. All I can say is I tried, but I could only go so far. Just keep that in mind. The way I see it, you have two women in your life. Pick one and make the most of it."

"Thanks," I said. But Jax didn't know everything. He only knew the surface, what he had observed.

Our conversation ended when Matthew entered the room.

"Good morning, Jax, Josh, and Nathan." He looked at each of us as he said our names and sat at the head of the table with a file folder. "I wanted to show you some photos, and also discuss something that has come to my attention recently."

We leaned in, ready to listen. Matthew opened his files and laid out three pictures. The three of us were in suits. They were the pictures Kelly had taken of us the day Olie and I did our first shoot together.

"Let me know if I can use these pictures to submit to the Sexiest Man Alive poll. Yes, you three are in the running as candidates, along with a list of actors. Congratulations. You've caught the eye of Hollywood."

The three of us smiled at each other, but we also shook our heads. "Sexiest Man

Alive," Josh repeated. "Wow. You might as well give it to me."

I liked Josh's humor because he was my friend. If he hadn't been, his words would have come off as arrogant, and I didn't handle arrogance well.

"You can take it," Jax said. Jax didn't care about being the sexiest man. He captured the sexiest model last year. His name, as well as pictures of him shirtless, had been plastered on billboards. Besides, his first priority was his family. He didn't give a shit about any of this.

As for me, I didn't, either. And I knew Josh had the same mindset, but he was playing along.

"Thank God it isn't up to me or the company to pick one winner." Matthew arched his brows. He already had enough things on his plate; he likely didn't want to add more. "However, whoever wins will grace the cover of our magazine and every top magazine related to fashion or not."

"Wow. That's amazing," Josh said. "Good luck to us. I hope at least one of us makes it."

Matthew placed the photos back into the folder and closed it. "The winner will get plenty of attention, and I'm sure we will get sponsors for more ads and opportunities."

"It sounds like it." I stared at Matthew's teal tie, reminding me of the same tie I had. Olie had given it to me at Christmas. And my mind trailed off to thoughts of our first Christmas together.

Christmas was one week away, but we opened our presents early. I had planned to visit my family during Christmas weekend. I invited Olie, but she wanted to celebrate it with her mom. Since it was just the two of them, I could understand her reasoning. I wouldn't have wanted her mother to spend it alone.

"Thank you," I said, pulling out the tie I had just unwrapped. "I love it. It's perfect."

"Sorry." Olivia crinkled her nose, nudging me on the shoulder.

My eyes grew wide. "Sorry for what, babe?"

She shrugged sheepishly. "It's just a tie."

"Just a tie?" My tone rose, examining it. I saw the label, not that I was looking for it. It was staring back at me in bold black letters. "It's a Hugo Boss tie? It's too expensive. I don't need material things. All I want or need is you. You shouldn't have spent that kind of money on me."

I yanked her body to mine, but I fell back onto the floor. Olivia had purposely pushed me down and straddled me on the floor in one swift move. We almost knocked down our nearly bare, little three-foot Christmas tree. We were frugal with our money. A Christmas tree would only last a month or less, but money in the bank meant more money for our future together.

"Naughty girl," I said, giving her a light smack on her ass.

"I can show you naughty," she said playfully, gripping my sweater with her hands. Leaning down, she pressed her body to mine like we were fucking and pulled my bottom lip with her teeth. Then she tilted her head, which always meant she was going to change the subject. "Do you like the color? Should I exchange it?"

"No, I love it. I have another use for it besides being around my neck."

"Like what?" She arched her brows in curiosity.

"Like this." I brought her arms together and looped the tie around her wrists so fast she didn't expect it. Catching her off-guard, I rocked back and forth, changing position. I lay on top of her, pinning her arms up above her head. "I think I've got you where I want you now."

She smirked. "I think you've got me where I want to be."

"Is that so?" I grinned. "I think I'm going to take advantage of you now." I pressed my face into the crook of her neck and tenderly kissed her there.

"I think I'm going to really like this," she moaned.

I stopped kissing her. "To be continued." Standing up, I offered her my hand.

"What? You tease. What are you doing?" she pouted.

"It's your turn to open your Christmas present."

"I can wait. I want you to open me." She waggled her brows, squirming.

I snickered. I couldn't wait for her to open hers. A month ago, she had been admiring a pair of black leather gloves and a cashmere scarf displayed in Nordstrom's window. Starting from today, they would be hers. Besides those, I had bought a piece of jewelry to show her how much she meant to me.

"Come on, Scrooge." I lifted her off the floor, untied the tie, held her hand, and led her to my bedroom.

"Scrooge?" she laughed.

How I loved the sound of her laughter, the greatest sound in the world. Presenting her with a box, I said, "Here you go. Open it."

Olie's eyes twinkled with excitement as she tore the wrapping. "I can't believe you bought the gloves and scarf I wanted." She put them on and threw herself at me.

"You forgot one more," I said, releasing her and guiding her back to the box.

"One more?" She sounded like a child, elated to have found another present. Taking off her gloves, she opened a smaller box. It was a bracelet with the word "love" formed in Swarovski crystals.

"It's beautiful," she gushed. Her eyes were sparkling with happy tears.

I took it out of the box and placed it around her wrist. "The charm is a symbol of how much I love you." Taking her hand, I flipped it over and drew a figure eight on her palm with my index finger. "You and me...forever."

There were no more words. She crushed me with her kiss and all of her.

I broke away from my thoughts of Olie, back to Matthew discussing M. Knight men's swimsuit and underwear line. Did I hear him right?

Matthew swung his chair side to side with a smirk. "If you feel uncomfortable with this, let me know."

Josh raised his arms in midair. "I'm fine with it."

"I'm fine with it, too, but I'm going to be taking some time off soon," Jax said.

Matthew nodded. "You can take all the time you need. My sister-in-law needs you. She comes first."

"Thank you," Jax said.

Then everyone looked at me. I smiled. "I'm in. Don't want the two of you having all the fun."
Chapter Twenty-five

Olivia

I couldn't wait to get us moved in. Everything about our apartment reminded me of Nate, and I was happy to shove it aside and get a fresh start. That was what I told myself. Even though I had no right to be mad at him for going to Kelly's that night, I couldn't help myself.

There were other reasons why I was beyond happy with our new place. Granted, we were moving from one apartment to another, but at least it would be in a better neighborhood and near my mom's friend Charlene's house. It would only take her ten minutes to drive there. And I would feel better leaving her alone when I had to travel.

Mom and I had been packing like crazy, what little we had to pack. It was mostly the kitchen stuff. Everything else, like our clothes, the movers shoved into large boxes. The movers were expensive, but it was worth not having the hassle. Four big men knocked on the door, and ever since then, they had been hard at work. We were just in the beginning stages and still had many things to load onto the moving truck.

I scratched my head, wondering how in the world we had accumulated so much stuff, just the two of us. As I glanced around at the mess, my head started spinning, thinking about how it was going to take all day to move and then days to unpack. I was already tired and I hadn't done much.

"Mom, can you get the door?" I asked, listening for the sound of my mom's steps and questioning why the movers would knock. I wanted to make sure she was on her way to the door before I got busy.

When I heard her happy voice, I figured it was one of the neighbors wishing us well, so I got busy again. Then I cranked up the volume on my phone, listening to Ed Sheeran's newest song and singing along with him as I moved about my room. Though I had packed almost everything in there, I hadn't decided what to do with the small box in my hand. Should I shove it in the larger box, or let it ride with me in my car? It was precious to me, after all.

The box, about the size of a shoebox, had been a gift from my mom for my birthday. Inside it she'd placed a sweater as well, but I loved how the box was decorated with butterflies and flowers in purple, yellow, and pink, my favorite colors.

"You still love Ed Sheeran? He should pay you every time you listen to his music."

The sound of his voice caught my breath in my throat. I froze, feeling happy heat rush through me, alongside guilt. I had lied to him, telling him we weren't moving and didn't need his help. How had he found out? I closed my eyes to take a deep breath and turned.

"Hi, Nate. Umm, I...we decided to move after all." I gave him a dorky 'I got caught' smile. "I didn't want to bother you after I had told you we weren't moving. And what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Kelly?" Her name spat out of my mouth as if I were trying to spit out poison.

"She's busy," he answered nonchalantly.

He leaned against the wall with his arms crossed. God, he looked so good in jeans, a T-shirt, and a baseball cap—a bit playful and mischievous. Although I used to be good at reading Nate's expressions, I couldn't read that one. He shook his head, lips pulled back in a faint smile. He was either amused to catch me trying to sing, knowing I couldn't hold a key if my life depended on it, or he was finding words to call me out for my lie.

"Oh, so you decided to pay me a visit?" I questioned, holding tightly to the box. I didn't want him to see inside.

He dropped his arm and took a step toward me. When I took a step back, he stopped, confused, eyeing the box. "Actually, your mom told me you were moving today."

"My mom?" My pitch may have risen an octave. "What did she say? I'm so sorry. See what happens? I told you not to come, and now she thinks she can call you and—"

"Olie." He cut me off. "It's okay. I don't mind. Besides..." He looked behind his shoulders out the door, "there are four big men moving your stuff. I know they're from a moving company, and I know the chances of something bad happening are slim, but I wouldn't feel safe for the both of you if I weren't here. I'm glad your mom texted me."

"She texted you?" My pitch rose again and my jaw dropped. I seriously had to have a talk with her. That was one of the reasons why I loved Nate, though. He was always cautious and always concerned when it came to my well-being. Something Troy never was. "She doesn't like to text."

"I guess I'm an exception." He shrugged.

"That you are. She never liked anyone I dated before you." I didn't mean to go back to our past. He looked away somberly then back to me again.

He shoved his hands inside his jeans. "Since I'm here, and your mom promised me a pie, I should get to work."

I ran my fingers through my hair, moving it away from my face. "You don't have to stay, Nate. I mean, I appreciate you wanting to help my mom."

He ignored me. "Let's start with the box you're holding." He came toward me.

If I had handed it to him, everything would have been just fine. Instead, I backed away, tripped over a box full of books, and stumbled backward on top of my bed. The box in my hand went flying onto the floor.

Being a gentleman, Nate reached down to help me clean up the mess. Instead of putting things back into the box, he sifted through them.

"You still have these?" he asked, holding up a photo of us at a Valentine's dinner. After he placed it down, he picked up a smaller box and opened it. It held the crystal bracelet he had given to me the last Christmas we spent together. It had been a while since I'd worn it. I'd thought about wearing it again, but not in front of him just yet.

I got off the bed reluctantly, wishing I could hide under the covers instead. Scattered about the carpet were more photos of us and some cards he had given me for my birthday, Christmas, and Valentine's Day. Nate always got me a card. He was sentimental that way.

He slowly peered upward at me with an expression I didn't understand. Was he mad? Then, with a hint of a smile, he quickly placed everything inside the box, closed the lid, and handed it to me. After I took it from his hand, he stood up, facing me.

"I never threw anything you gave me away," I said, looking down at the box. In the silence that followed, I wondered what he thought.

He heaved a long sigh. "You kept everything but me." His words came out soft but harsh, and they were loud as thunder in my mind.

Hurt swam in his eyes. What do I say after that? He was so right. Before I had the chance to speak, he turned and walked out of my room, shattering my heart into pieces. I wanted to cry. I was reliving that night again, the very night I wanted to redo.

It wasn't his fault, I told myself. He was only speaking the truth. He didn't hate me or he wouldn't have come, but he was learning to be cordial with me. I guessed I should be thankful for that at least. And the fact that he came to help my mom because she asked meant the world to me.

I somehow glued back the broken pieces of my heart somewhat, held my head up high, and walked out to where the men were moving the boxes with a dolly. They were big and muscular and very capable of moving the furniture. Directing them on what to move first, I then weaved around to frown at my mom.

"Why didn't you tell me you had invited Nathan?" I whispered so only she could hear as I passed her. I didn't want to make it obvious I was talking about Nate when he was picking up a box near her.

She shrugged without looking my way. After closing up a box, she said, "I did. Look at your text."

Nate twisted his body to face my mom, thinking she'd said something to him. I wasn't a photographer, but that pose should have been photographed. I understood hot when I saw it. The way he was holding the box and his arm muscles were flexed. The way his eyebrows arched, questioning. The way his lips slowly curled up just enough to give one hell of a sexy grin. And that baseball cap tilting, showing a boyish, playful side. He was swoon-worthy perfect. And without trying, Nate had a lot of those moments. When my mom just smiled, he headed out the door.

Taking out my cell, I checked for her message. I should have felt a vibration or something while packing, but hadn't. Looking at my messages, I saw one text from her, but the time didn't match up. She texted me after he'd come. My mom was sneaky! I didn't say anything else. The truth was, I was happy he was there even though he'd come for my mom.

Nathan

The words 'you kept everything but me' flew out of my mouth before I could stop myself. They were immature and hurtful words, but they had been said, and I couldn't take it back. It felt good to say it, but at the same time, I felt like an asshole.

I was touched Olivia had kept everything from us in a box, but I wasn't going to deny it; it stung to see our memories. The box was a casket filled with dead things. Looking at the crystal bracelet I'd gifted her, I found it to be ironic where we were. There was nothing infinite about us in any way.

I used to draw the infinity symbol on her palm with my finger on the nights she didn't stay at my place. It was a sweet gesture to tell her silently how much I loved her. I wanted her to hold on to the infinity sign while we were apart. How things had changed.

It might have been better if Emily hadn't texted me to let me know they were moving. I knew why she'd done it. She wanted Olie and me back together, though I was pretty sure Emily knew I was dating someone. They were so close, Olie had to have told her. That was very sly of her, but I couldn't get mad at all. She'd never done anything to upset me. Emily had always been supportive and had accepted me, even when I was barely making ends meet. She'd never treated me differently because I wasn't well off. Most moms would frown on that. Every mom wanted the best for their daughter, especially a rich man.

When I walked out of Olie's room, the men had just come back from the truck to load again. I kept my distance and my eyes away from Olie, but when a couple of the men were checking her out, glowered at them. I knew they wouldn't do anything, especially since I was there. I was glad I'd come.

Moving was a bitch. Not counting our lunch break, we took at least three hours to load up the truck. It wasn't that they had loads of stuff. It was those damn flights of stairs we had to work around. Sometimes we took the elevator and sometimes taking the stairs was faster, only because it was a Saturday and more people were in and out of the large apartment complex.

Emily and Olie did one last check to see if we had it all. I was hollow, seeing the empty apartment. A lot of good memories were created there. I could only imagine how Emily and Olie must have felt.

"Well, I guess this is it," Emily said with tears in her eyes. The three of us stood by the open door, ready to close it for the last time. "We moved here when your father left me. This place holds a special place in my heart. It's where Olivia grew up. My heart is broken. I don't know why I'm crying."

"It's okay, Emily." I embraced her then let her go.

"Thanks, Nathan. This was your home, too." Those words hit home. Emily had always made me feel like I was home.

"I know," I agreed, nodding and placing my hand on her shoulder.

"We'll make new memories at our new place, Mom," Olie said, sighing and crossing her arms in front as if to embrace herself. She was trying to steady her emotions. Without thinking, I placed my arm around her shoulders. But when she slipped her hand into mine, I dropped my hand.

Touching her burned me. It was one thing when we had to be close during a session for work, but it was another when we were at a place where we'd created memories. Olie stiffened by my side and the tension between us returned.

"Time to say good-bye to the past," Emily said, shutting the door and then wiping her tears.

I'd already said good-bye to the past, so why was I there?
Chapter Twenty-six

Olivia

I had expected Nate to leave right after everything had been moved out, but he even followed us to our new place. As I looked around the unfurnished, two-bedroom apartment with white walls and hardwood floors, I determined it was a little bit bigger than our old apartment, but it seemed so cold and unwelcoming. My mom and I would give it a homey feel when all of our belongings were set in place.

"What do you think, Nathan?" Mom asked, sitting on the sofa. She had just ordered Chinese food to be delivered.

Nate was moving some boxes to the kitchen when he stopped to answer my mom. "It's nice. It's bigger and I like that it's on the first floor. And there are no stairs leading to the front of the apartment. It will keep you out of trouble." He chuckled lightly.

"That's for sure," I added, rolling my eyes, recalling when she'd told me she had fallen and thought she had broken her wrist.

"Hey," my mom snarled, "just wait till you both become my age."

Nate glanced around. "Looks like most of the boxes are in the right rooms. I should get going." He walked toward my mom.

Mom got up. "What? You're not staying for dinner?"

He looked at his watch. "I need to be somewhere."

'Somewhere' meant he had dinner plans with Kelly. I'd anticipated this would happen, but even forewarning myself didn't ease the ache.

"Oh." Mom sounded disappointed. "Okay, then. You'll have to come by soon. I promised you a pie. But next time, you'll have to stay for dinner."

Nate gave her a kiss on the cheek and a hug. "I'll try. I have a full schedule ahead and I'll have to travel."

Mom patted his arms, like a proud mom would do to her son. "Just be careful."

Nate's words were a way to let Mom know in a polite way that he wouldn't be visiting soon. Eventually, he would cut ties with her, especially if his relationship with Kelly went to the next level, and I didn't want to think about that. Wiping that thought away, I leaned back on our stark-white walls for support.

After Nate said his good-byes to my mom, he gestured with a tilt of his head. "Can I talk to you outside?"

The anticipation of what he wanted to talk about ate at me. My heart pounded. "Sure."

He closed the door behind us when we went outside. Thoughts ran crazily in my mind. Have I done something wrong? Does he want to get back together? No, that couldn't be it, but a little part of me was hopeful.

He seemed nervous. He took off his cap to pull back his hair, and then returned it to his head. "Olivia," he started to say.

That name sounded so formal. There was not even an ounce of love when he said my name. I knew then, it wasn't going to be what I wanted to hear.

"Why did you bring me out here?" I asked softly, preparing myself.

"Listen. I know you don't want me to tell Kelly about us, but I don't like lying to her. It isn't fair to her. If I were in her shoes, I would want to know. So I'm letting you know I'm going to have to tell her."

My heart plunged to my stomach and heat blazed through me in an instant. Nate telling Kelly about us meant another step away from me. I held my head high, urging myself to be strong. It wasn't the end of the world...It was the end for Nate and me. I had to accept this. He was going to put the dead lock on the door I was trying to keep open.

"Okay," I said finally. "If I were in her shoes, I would want to know, too. It's just that...I just met her and I didn't know how to bring it up with her. But I understand. Your loyalty is to her first, so that's fine. Thanks for all your help, and if that's all you wanted to say to me then you should go. Thanks. Bye. Drive safe." My last few sentences came out fast. I wanted him gone. Unable to control the ache growing inside me, it took every ounce of willpower to stop myself from tearing up. I felt like once I shut that door, it would be the end of us for sure. I didn't give him a chance to say anything. Snatching open the door, I went inside and shut it behind me.

Nathan

Olie had slammed the door on me. She hadn't given me a chance to say a word, not that I had much to say. I'd only wanted to let her know I needed to tell Kelly and was just giving her a heads-up. She hadn't taken it well. Frankly, I didn't care. We needed to move on with our lives, and I was.

I didn't understand why she was being moody about it. Was she jealous that I had found someone and was happy and she wasn't? How would I know? She might have been dating someone and hiding that fact. I didn't understand women's moods, anyway. She had to realize I would eventually need to tell Kelly about us. So I didn't get her feisty attitude. However, I did get one thing: their friendship would most likely become nonexistent, or they would simply remain acquaintances.

I texted Kelly to let her know I was on my way. She had cooked dinner even after long hours at work. I had tried to talk her into going out to eat, but she said she enjoyed cooking for me. Such a sweet gesture. I had a feeling I might fall in love with her.

When I arrived, I knocked on the door with a bottle of wine and a bouquet of red roses in my hand. Since I hadn't wanted to come empty-handed, especially when she had gone out of her way to cook dinner, I surprised her with something to make her smile.

"For me?" she gushed, pointing to herself with an innocent look.

"Always for you." I gave her a kiss on the cheek, handed her the flowers, and entered. The aroma of pot roast spiraled through my nose, making my stomach rumble. I couldn't wait to dig in. Heading for the kitchen, I placed the wine on the counter, opened the cabinet to pull out two glasses, and started to pour.

Kelly reached under the cabinet and pulled out a clear vase. She began arranging the flowers to her liking. "They're beautiful. Thank you. You know, if you keep this up, I just might have to keep you."

I reached over with my lips puckered. When she planted a kiss on them, I said, "I guess it will be another reason to send you more then." I winked.

Kelly popped my hand when I reached for the lid. "You're not supposed to open the slow cooker until it's time," she scolded.

I yanked her into my arms, taking in the scent of her flowery perfume. "Oh, yeah? My mom used a slow cooker all the time, and she didn't tell me not to open the lid when I did."

Kelly's blue eyes twinkled under the lights. "Were you a naughty boy?" Her tone came off as playful as she idly stroked my biceps. And the word 'naughty' sounded so much sexier coming from her mouth.

I waggled my brows. "I was perfect. But I think I became naughty when I met you."

She lightly smacked my shoulder while still in my arms. "You liar." She laughed. "You've been plenty naughty with other women before you met me."

"Nah," I shrugged. I smiled, but it was cut short. "I need to talk to you about something."

Kelly must have heard the seriousness in my tone. "Sure." She glanced toward the slow cooker. "It'll be done in five minutes and it will automatically go to warm," she explained. "Let's go sit down." Holding my hand, she led me to the sofa.

Sitting next to her, I took a deep breath. I knew she would understand. But why did it seem so hard to tell her? It felt like a confession, telling her about my failed attempt at a relationship. How I wasn't good enough for Olie—the reason why she had left me. But of course, I wasn't going to tell her all that.

"So, what did you need to tell me?" Kelly's eyes were full of concern. With her hands in her lap, she seemed eager, and I didn't blame her. I would have been, too.

I took her hand in mine and tenderly caressed it. "I wanted to tell you earlier, but from the shock of how you know Olivia..." It was difficult to say her name as if she would somehow come between us. "I couldn't. I didn't know how to tell you."

"How to tell me what?" Her zealous need to know was replaced by fear in her eyes. "What is it, Nathan?"

I inhaled a deep breath. Why was I so nervous? Surely, Kelly would understand. "I used to date Olivia. I mean, we were a couple." It felt so strange to talk about Olie in the past tense when I'd always thought she would be my future. Even as I told Kelly that Olie and I were a thing of the past, the ache was still there, but not as intense.

Kelly locked her eyes with mine, speechless, expressionless. Then a few heartbeats later, she eased her hand from mine and spoke. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?" She blinked. "I don't know Olivia that well, but I know you. We were dating. You knew she was in town. You should have told me." She blinked even more, still dumbfounded. "We had dinner, for Christ's sake, Nathan. I had my hands all over you. She must think I'm a bitch, rubbing it in her face." Her tone rose angrily. "Does she know about us?"

I ruffled my hair, surprised Kelly took it so hard. But women and men thought differently, so I didn't even try to comprehend this one. "Yes. And don't get so worked up about this. She's cool about it. Also, she wanted the chance to talk to you about it, but I told her it was best that I brought it up first."

Kelly got up and crossed her arms. "You think?" she snapped, and then paused. "What did you actually tell her about us? What are we, anyway?"

I shifted my body to face her head-on. "We're still what we were from the start. We're taking it slow, just how we decided to take it."

"What if I want to take the next step?" she challenged.

"What do you mean by the next step?"

"Be exclusive."

"I thought we were. At least I have been. Have you?" I cocked a brow.

Kelly sat back down next to me. "Yes, I have. I barely have time for you." She placed her hand on my lap and met my gaze. "I think we should move forward. I want us to move in together. I want us to be a couple, the next stage after dating." She chuckled. "I'm saying a lot of words, but I just want to be clear. What do you think?"

I looked down at her hand that found mine. Her thumb roamed over my knuckles. "Kelly." I paused. "I'm giving you all I can for now. We haven't been dating that long. Don't get me wrong, I think you're special. I'm going to want more. I know it. It's just that I still need time. And why do you want more all of a sudden? Does this have anything to do with Olivia?"

Kelly pulled her hand back. "No. It doesn't. I've been thinking about it for the past several days. We hardly have time for each other, so I thought if we moved in together and took the next step, it would be easier."

My face felt hot. There was too much pressure. "I'll be moving out of my place soon. And...I think it's too soon, Kelly."

She narrowed her eyes at me. "It's Olivia. Isn't it? You still care for her, don't you? It only makes sense. You never mentioned her name or gave me more details about your relationship. She tainted you, didn't she?"

I closed my eyes to calm the anger building inside me. After I counted to five, I said, "Whatever Olivia and I had is over. She is very aware you and I are dating. She doesn't care about me or have any interest in getting back together."

"How do you know?" Kelly stared at the painting of the ocean on the wall. Her mind drifted somewhere, until she got up. "Oh my God, Nathan! I told the both of you to get close. To put your lips closer." She started pacing. "I feel like such a fool."

I wrapped my arms around her, stopping her, and kissed her lips. "I'm so sorry, Kelly. Please understand. We weren't trying to hide this from you. It's a delicate situation. I didn't even know we had been assigned to the same shoot. I was just as shocked as she was. We hadn't spoken to each other months. I can't even remember how long it's been."

Kelly's body wasn't trembling like before so I knew she was coming to her senses. Her pride had gotten in the way of her reasoning. It was always that way. Pride was a powerful emotion that could utterly control anyone, even someone as sweet and understanding as Kelly.

"You forgive me?" I rocked us gently side to side with her still in my embrace. Though I didn't do anything wrong by her, I had to be the patient one. I had to try to understand her. It was the least I could do for her, seeing how she had brought happiness back into my life. Kelly had brought me back from the dead, breathed new life into me.

She stopped the motion and stared piercingly into my eyes. Her hand on my shoulder told me she was okay. "I only want to know one thing, and I'll never ask you any questions about her again."

"Sure." I smiled. "What do you want to know?"

"Why did you break up?"

Fuck! How was I going to tell her I had proposed to Olie? There was no way I could tell her, so I led her back to the sofa and told her everything but that. I really liked Kelly, and I could see us in the future, but I wasn't absolutely sure. I wasn't fully invested in her just yet. She didn't need to know everything. Sometimes some things were better left unsaid.

"I see," she said, sighing.

"Are you going to be okay working with her, me, and sometimes us?"

She shrugged. "I have no choice. I'm committed."

I caressed her face. "It's just for a little while. She has a place in New York. After this project, she'll probably go back."

She lightly smacked her forehead. "I can't believe the irony of this. I'm the one who got her the job. Did she tell you?"

"Yeah." I rolled my eyes for emphasis. "So you know, it's kind of your fault."

"My fault?" She found her humor.

I started to tickle her sides. "Yes, your fault."

"Stop it." She wiggled and laughed. "Okay. It's my fault." She leaped into my arms, pushing me back. One leg on each side, she straddled me. "So, are you guys friends now? How often do you talk?"

I crinkled my nose, holding on to her ass for support. I squeezed it, loving the feel of her tight butt. "Let's not talk about Olivia." I went in for the neck, sucking and nipping. "I think I want dessert first." Hopefully, I'd show her I cared about her through my actions, even though I couldn't fully commit just yet. Judy had been right. It was harder to give all of me after Olie.
Chapter Twenty-seven

Olivia

"Isla." I waved at her.

"Olivia," she called, rolling her suitcases toward me.

I had just pulled up to the curb when she texted me to let me know she had come out of the terminal. She had also texted me the address to her brother's place, where she would be staying the next couple of weeks.

"It's so good to see you." I hugged her tightly. Releasing her, I popped open the trunk, and with her help, we shoved both suitcases in. After we got in the car, we were ready to go.

"The traffic seems worse every time I'm back. LAX is crazy." Isla opened the mirror, checked out her face, and ruffled her hair.

"You look gorgeous. Stop checking yourself out." I snorted.

"Speak for yourself. But you've lost a little weight." She looked concerned.

"I'm okay. Just been busy." I measured the distance between the cars in front and behind us in the other lane and swiftly cut in.

"So how are things with Nathan? You guys at least friends?"

I shrugged with my lips in a thin line. "I guess. What's the definition of friends when you're no longer together? The word 'friends' doesn't seem like the right term to use. We're never going to call each other. We're never going to have lunch or dinner together. I'll never want to hear what he's doing with Kelly. The only thing I want to hear from him regarding Kelly is that they've broken up." My words came out fast and they might have sounded as if I was yelling at her.

Isla leaned back against the door, shifting her weight to look at me. I glanced at her briefly as I was getting on the freeway.

"What? You're looking at me weird. Stop it." I laughed softly.

"Someone is bitter. And didn't you tell me Nathan helped you move?"

"He helped my mom move. She asked for his help, not me."

Isla faced the front again. "That's what you think. If he had fully moved on, he wouldn't be at your place. I don't care if you think he came by for your mother...he came for you, dorknut."

"Dorknut?" I laughed. "I am a dorknut." I lightly pounded on the wheel.

Isla ignored my actions. "I bet Kelly doesn't know he helped you move."

"Yes, she does." Then I thought Isla might be right. Before Nate left, he'd told me he needed to tell Kelly about us. He probably hadn't told Kelly about his visits, though it was only a couple of times. "Whatever. I don't care."

"And you're a big, fat baby, too," she added.

I flashed my eyes at her and then back to the road. "Am not," I pouted, and purposely sounded like one.

Isla rested her hand on my arm, and then dropped it to her side. "Have no fear, roomie. I'm going to find out exactly what's going on between them. Since you are invested and your emotions are out of whack, you're not very observant. Don't worry, Isla is here."

I giggled because she was so right. Having her there was not only going to be fun, but she would be my rock and my strength through this. "What do you have in mind?"

She waggled her brows, giving me the most mischievous smile. "Oh, I've got lots of things up my sleeve, Olivia. You only know the sweet, friendly, and kind Isla. There's a naughty side of me you don't want to mess with. Watch out, Kelly, meet Olivia's roommate, Olivia's protector, Olivia's bitch!"

We burst out laughing. I changed the subject, having had enough of Kelly and Nate. Every time I heard their names, I wanted to throw up as I envisioned their naked bodies entangled in a heated mess.

"So what's going on in your life? Dating anyone new?" I asked, changing the subject.

"You mean since our last conversation? Nope. It's too hard finding my idea of the perfect guy."

"He's out there for you, Isla. It might be next week, next month, next year, or even further into your future, but he's waiting for you."

She sighed. "Maybe. It's okay. I'm not in a hurry to be in a serious relationship. I want to do what I want to do. My sister-in-law and I are about the same age and she has two kids already. She and her husband, my brother, have little ones who depend on them. They can't just pick up and leave. I want to have fun before I settle down. But for you, on the other hand, you already have the one. He just needs a Cupid to wake him up. Nathan is with the wrong woman."

I ran my fingers through my hair, silently agreeing with her. "I left him. It's my fault."

"Maybe. He just needs a good smack in the head."

"Isla." I shook my head.

She turned again, staring at me with an impish smile, showing me all her teeth. "Seduce him and have sex with him."

"What?" I almost hit the horn when I smacked the steering wheel. I should have knocked some sense into her instead. "He's not going to sleep with me, especially because of Kelly. If they weren't together there might be a possibility, but..." What the heck am I thinking?

Her eyes lit up, dismissing what I had just said. "Then get him wasted and sleep with him, but make sure he wakes up next to you in the morning. If he remembers how good it used to be, maybe he'll crave it again. He doesn't know what he's missing."

I couldn't believe what Isla was suggesting. Charlene had suggested the same thing. It wasn't a laughing matter, but I had to laugh at their similar solutions to my problem. Old or young, who knew they would've had the same idea?

"Forget about it." I threw up my hand. "He made it clear to me he wants to be with Kelly. I'm not playing games. And I don't think he would use Kelly to get to me." For my selfish reasons, I wished he had. Having enough of that topic, I changed it. "Your brother is expecting you, right?"

Isla tapped her fingers on the armrest. "My sister-in-law will be home. She's an elementary school teacher. She'll be home by the time you drop me off, if we ever get off the freeway. The traffic is horrendous. I feel like I'm back in New York."

"I think the traffic is worse there," I commented.

Isla looked out the window. "Maybe. It's still nice and sunny in October. That's one thing I love about Los Angeles."

"Yeah," I agreed somberly, not knowing why I felt moody. "When do you do the swimsuit shoot?"

"In two days."

"Me, too. I'll see you there. Then let's go to dinner afterward."

"Sounds like a plan. Did you see the itinerary?"

I looked at the navigation screen when it told me to go right to the 405 Freeway. After I checked my blind spot and changed lanes, I said, "No, did you?"

"Guess who I'm paired up with?"

"Your friend Josh?"

"Nope. Speaking of Josh, do you mind if he comes out to dinner with us? He'll be at the shoot, too, and he'll probably want to join us."

"Not a problem. I like him. He's really sweet." I looked straight ahead, feeling defeated by the gridlocked traffic.

"Thanks. Anyway, he's your partner and Nathan is mine."

"Oh," I said, not minding. Partners changed from shoot to shoot, but I couldn't help wondering if Nate had told Kelly about us and she had changed the partners.

"Well," Isla said, bringing my attention back to her. "I can't wait to interrogate him and Kelly."

"Isla!" My pitch rose.

"I'm just kidding. However, there are other ways of finding out the truth, and I'm going to get to the bottom of things."

I patted my friend's arm, thanking her, but there was no need. Nate had moved on and left no room for me in his life. "Isla. What am I going to do with you?"

She ignored me. "There's always Josh," she sang out. "He'll tell me anything. We're best buds."

I smacked my forehead. This was going to be interesting. Maybe I should call in sick.
Chapter Twenty-eight

Nathan

I woke up feeling disoriented and out of place. Whatever I dreamt the previous night, it only came to me in bits and pieces. Some parts were about Olie, and some were about Kelly, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't remember what it was about.

Kelly and I had decided not to see each other yesterday. She was busy having lunch with friends, and I was busy with mine. Frankly, I wanted to give her some space, and I kind of needed mine. Having Olie in town threw my life out of balance.

Lying there, I thought about the past couple of years—about how a couple of years didn't seem long, yet so many things had changed in my life. I still couldn't believe I was working for Knight Fashion, but I was grateful for it every day.

After I got up, took a shower, and got ready for the day's shoot at Kelly's studio, I started to dread going. Kelly knew about Olie, so I wondered how she would act around her. I knew she would be professional—there was no doubt about that—but I felt bad about their possible friendship I had destroyed. Then again, why should I feel responsible? I didn't plan this. It just happened. Hopefully, after this session, either Olie would be assigned to a different project or another photographer would be assigned to us.

Opening my latest email, I checked over my itinerary once more. It would be only the four of us: Josh, Olie, me, and someone new named Isla. Was she the same Isla—Olie's roommate? Reading farther down, I noted a change from last night. I had looked it over briefly before I went to bed. I was almost positive Olie and I had been paired up for the swimsuit session. I scratched the back of my head, and stared at the screen. Maybe I had been too tired and hadn't seen it clearly. Or maybe my head had been showing me what my heart wanted to see. I shook my head, shook that last thought out of my mind.

The traffic was horrendous, even in the late morning. When I arrived, everyone was already in their robes, waiting for me.

"You're late, Nathan. Go get dressed and put on the white robe," Kelly directed without a greeting or a smile, or even a hello.

I got that she was busy adjusting her camera and she wanted to be professional, but there was no welcoming quality in her tone. It was a stone-cold, bitchy tone.

I arched my brow and then immediately shifted my attention to Josh, Olie, and Isla.

"Nathan." Josh and the ladies came up to me. Josh gave me the man hug—a slap on my back with a handshake. "Meet my friend from New York. She's also Olivia's roommate. Nathan, Isla. Isla, Nathan. What a small world."

"Hi, Isla." I offered my hand. "It's nice to meet you."

It took her a few long seconds, but her eyes eventually went from my face to my hand and then she took it.

"Hi," she said in a dream-like state. "It's so nice to meet Olivia's boyfriend. I meant..." She shook her head, releasing my hand. "Olivia's ex. She's told me so much about you."

Knowing Kelly had heard her, I stiffened a little. "I'm sure it's all bad."

"Believe me. It's all good." Her eyes twinkled, giving me the 'you're hot and I would like to take you to bed' kind of smile.

Kelly cleared her throat. "Nathan, we don't have all day. Please get dressed," she barked.

Ignoring her, but trying to be polite, I excused myself, got dressed, and walked out with a robe on.

"I'm going to shoot Olivia and Josh first." Kelly pointed at the white backdrop. "We're shooting in the studio today for the catalog, but next week, you'll be at a set on location. I don't know where, but it won't be with me."

"Do you know who the photographer will be?" Olie asked, looking concerned.

"I'm not your secretary, and I certainly don't have your itinerary memorized." Kelly spoke with a level tone, but it was uncalled for. It came out from left field. I'd thought Kelly would have more class. My stress and blood pressure went through the roof.

Olie's eyes grew wider. I thought she'd say something, but she didn't. She gazed at me, hurt, and turned away.

"Well, with that kind of attitude, I wouldn't want you to be my secretary," Isla retorted.

Kelly gave her a cold, calculating glare. It suddenly got way too hot in the room.

"We're wasting time. Josh and Olivia, disrobe, and you know where to stand. I need to take lots of sexy pictures," Kelly threw in her order.

My eyes had a mind of their own. They went straight to Olie. She dropped that robe without an ounce of shyness. Every curve of her beautiful body, every inch of her was familiar—every inch I had touched and kissed brought back the memories of us. I gasped lightly, breathless at the sight of her in a crimson bikini. And something inside my core awakened.

When Josh gawked, taking in her pale skin and the bikini barely covering her, I knew his horny ass was feeling what I was feeling, and I wanted to punch him in the face. I was out of line to have such thoughts about my friend. He was only doing his job. But he didn't have to enjoy it so much. With Kelly's camera in place, she started to click away as soon as she saw Josh and Olie on their marks.

"Put your arms behind her Josh," Kelly directed. "Press your body to hers. Good. Lower your hand...a lot lower. Both of you look at me, cheek to cheek."

I let out a soft growl and released my fingers when I realized how tight my fists were. Josh's hands were on my Olivia's ass. And with his dirty mind, I knew what he was thinking. Judging by his smile, he was thoroughly enjoying it. And I fuckin' wasn't.

What is wrong with me? I shouldn't be feeling this way when Kelly is around. No, I shouldn't be feeling this way at all. Turning away with my jaw clenching, I came face to face with Isla. She tried to hide her sly smile, but she knew I wasn't happy. Damn! She didn't need to see that. And from the corner of my eye, I saw the disappointment and hurt on Kelly's face.

I had a feeling she had paired them up to see how I would react. Maybe I was reading too much into everything that had happened so far. Maybe I was seeing things. Kelly might have been frowning at the camera, how the photos weren't turning out the way she'd like. She certainly took a lot of pictures of them together in different positions. Some were unjustifiable, like the one where his face rested under her chin, placing his head right on her breasts. Kelly, what kind of game are you playing?

Olivia

I wanted to question why certain shots were needed, but I knew Kelly would only bark at me. Ever since I had walked into her studio, our whatever-friendship from before had evaporated. She hadn't greeted me and she had no problem letting me know she knew about Nate and me.

I arrived first. Her admin assistant was on the phone so I just waved at her and walked right to the back.

"Hey, Kelly." I greeted her with a smile, but my gut itched with anticipation. I didn't know if Nate had told Kelly about us just yet.

Without a hello or a smile, she said, "Look, I know about you and Nathan. I wish I had known before I made a total fool of myself, but whatever...it's done. I know it's over, but let's be professional about this. Nathan and I are heading to the next level. We're in the process of moving in together. I'm going to assume you're only here for the job, and it has nothing to do with wanting Nathan back."

I wasn't sure what to make of her words. Flabbergasted, all I could do was listen to her somewhat threatening speech. But the ache overflowed when she mentioned moving in together. If I didn't make a move soon, it would be the end of Nate and me for sure. And the heat rose immediately to my face. I thought I was going to blow up at Kelly's unnecessary tone. Talk about being unprofessional. Her words were uncalled-for.

Trying to be the better person, I sucked up my pride and explained, "Kelly, I wanted to tell you, but I didn't know how. We had just met. You also helped me get this job, so when I found out who you were dating, I was in shock. There's nothing going on between Nathan and me. We're friends. He helped me move, but that was all. And—"

"What?" she interrupted. "What do you mean he helped you move?"

I wished I could take back my words.

"You're moving here permanently?" she continued.

"No. I don't know. It will depend on my next job." I folded my hands and bit my lip, not liking being interrogated. This was none of her business.

Her eyes narrowed, and she tilted her head in confusion. "Then when and how did he help you move?" She seemed surprised.

Crap! Nate must have kept that part out of their conversation.

"Listen. Don't make it into a big deal, but I'm not going to say any more. This is between you and Nathan. You need to ask him." With that, I walked away.

As soon as we were done, I put on my robe and stormed past Kelly. Last time, she showed me some of the pictures she liked, but this time, I knew there would be none to share. What is her problem? She was the one dating my Nate.

Knowing Nate and Isla were up, I didn't walk out, but instead, I stayed by the dressing area. It had been a while since I'd seen him without a shirt. His shoulders looked stronger, and if I wasn't mistaken, he looked even more muscular and toned than the last time I'd seen him. Or maybe I'd forgotten. Either way, he was something to drool over, and from Isla's expression, she agreed with me.

My eyes and lust took over. With his broad shoulders, six-pack, and toned biceps, Nate looked drop-dead gorgeous in his blue trunks. He was a fine sculpture in every way. And all I could do was admire him from a distance and be captivated by him. Isla looked amazing, as well. She wore a blue bikini, matching Nate like they were a couple.

Cameras loved Nate, but I would have never guessed he'd become a model. He used to shy away from cameras. I had to twist his arm and beg for him to have his picture taken. Now he loved it. The way he turned at the precise angle—the side he knew would be picture-perfect—he knew exactly what to do. He made love to the camera, and it loved him back. Isla was a natural, too. I wasn't jealous they had been paired up together. It was the thought of her skin touching his and knowing she was trying not to lust after him that made me laugh. Knowing Isla, she would be apologizing to me afterward.

I had to laugh and find humor in all of it. Kelly didn't instruct Nate and Isla to be in close range as she had with Josh and me. Was she trying to pair us up together? Maybe if we were flesh to flesh, sparks would fly? For all I knew, those were Matthew Knight's instructions on the photos, and I was making up bullshit because I was so pissed off at how Kelly had approached me.

After the session, Kelly's attitude still hadn't changed. I had a feeling I knew why she was so unhappy. Trying not to make it obvious, I whispered to Nate by the dressing room.

"I'm sorry," I said, meeting his eyes. My eyes wanted to roam about his body, but I stopped myself.

"Sorry about what?" he whispered back. His lips twisted at the corner, seemingly finding humor in our conversation.

"I accidently told Kelly you helped me move. I think she's upset. It was by mistake. I thought she knew. I assumed you told her everything."

Nate looked over his shoulder to where Kelly had been standing. She was nowhere in sight. She must have gone to her office. "It's okay. She would have found out sooner or later, anyway."

"Why didn't you tell her?" I crossed my arms angrily, but my voice was low and soft. I didn't want Kelly to hear our conversation.

His lips were slightly curled, eyes twinkling. He was looking at me the way he used to when I did something that made him want to laugh. I was taken aback by his expression, but it made me smile in return. What was he thinking?

"What's so funny?" I sneered at him with my hands on my hips.

"Nothing." He shook his head. His expression changed to a somber one. "I was thinking about something in the past. Remember when you were huffing and puffing about something you had cooked for me because you burned it? You had white flour in your hair and ketchup on your face."

I blinked. "So, you're seeing flour in my hair and ketchup on my face right this minute? I mean, out of all the things to imagine...like what I might be wearing under the robe, though you already know what I'm wearing. But maybe you could have a little naughtier imagination than stuff on my face like a toddler. 'Cause there was no doubt where my mind went," I said without thinking.

Since Nate had brought up our past, I had given myself permission to say what I wanted. I laughed and then stopped when I saw Kelly glaring at us. Shit. She probably hadn't heard my words since I had been practically whispering. Maybe it was the proximity of our bodies? Nate had been leaning in closer to catch my words. Or maybe it was the sound of our laughter she didn't want to hear?

I glanced around to find Isla talking to Josh. When Nate walked away, I raced over there and tried not to focus on Nate and Kelly. I might have caused a little rift.
Chapter Twenty-nine

Nathan

"I need to talk to you."

I hated those words. Those words reminded me of when Olie had left me. It was the only time she'd said those exact words. Frankly, if Kelly told me she was leaving me because of Olie, then she wasn't meant for me in the first place.

"What?" I asked, surprised by her attitude and her snippy tone. "Here?" I pointed down, questioning if she meant in the open for everyone to hear.

"In my office." She left me standing there.

First, I didn't like the way she spoke to me, like a child in trouble. Second, it was rude of her to talk to me in front of my friends that way. After I put on my robe, I sauntered after her and gripped her arm, forcing her to turn around before we entered her office. "What's the matter? Why are you angry?"

Her eyebrows arched to the ceiling and she pointed at herself. "What's wrong with me? What are you hiding, Nathan? Why didn't you tell me you were spending time with Olivia behind my back?"

I raked my hair back to calm my nerves, feeling anxiety flush through me. "I didn't think it was of importance to you. And I wasn't spending time with her. I was helping her mom move. Emily asked for my help, not Olivia, and since you were busy, I stepped up. I was going to tell you about it."

She entered her office, forcing me to follow. Closing the door, she walked to her desk. "When, Nathan? Olivia told me about it. She said she thought you'd told me, but I doubt that's true. She probably told me to rub it in my face."

My jaw dropped, shocked at Kelly's words and behavior. She was not the Kelly I thought I was beginning to really like, someone I could possibly love if given time to build our relationship. "You're kidding me, right? Olivia is not that kind of girl. Just before you came out, she asked me why I hadn't told you. She felt bad."

Leaning her ass on the desk, she folded her arms, still looking pissed. "You really expect me to believe that? You don't know women, Nathan. We can be vicious, conniving, and manipulative. And just before I came out, you two looked very cozy. I have no idea what you were talking about, but it seemed pretty intimate to me."

I took a step toward her, having had enough of this shit. "Women can be jealous, possessive, and insecure." I took several steps more. "I'm not leaving you for Olivia, Kelly. I'm right here. But if you continue this, I'll be leaving because of you." Now standing in front of her, I yanked her to me. "Come here. Why don't I come over tonight and we can have make-up sex?" I kissed her cheek. "You already think I'm great, but you haven't seen anything yet, baby. Unless you want it right here on your desk, in your office," I coaxed, sucking her neck and pressing into her.

"Oh God, Nathan. You make it so hard to stay mad at you," she moaned, and her breath hitched.

"Why would you want to stay mad at me? It's not fun." I waggled my brows. "Unless you want to make up."

She untied my robe, dropping her hand inside my swim trunks. "You're so hot, Nathan. I want you here, right now. I've never had sex in my office before."

Taking her words as permission, I conquered her lips in madness, showing her what anger felt like in the heat of passion. With one swift sweep of my arms, I knocked everything off her desk, except for the computer and phone. After I dropped my robe, I helped her undress while my mouth still roamed every part of her exposed skin.

Kelly's eyes grew darker. Pulling down my swim trunks, she started to take off her skirt.

"No, keep your skirt on," I demanded, whipping her around so her back faced me. With a smack on her ass, I bent her over her desk. My greedy hands caressed her ass and prepared to show her how exciting and hot make-up sex could be. Kelly was so wet and ready for me. After I was done with her, she was going to want sex on her desk all the time.

Olivia

Nate and Kelly were either having an intense argument or...I didn't want to think anything else. Kelly had demanded to see Nate in her office, and they hadn't come out since. It had been ten minutes. We had already changed and were waiting around for further instructions from Kelly.

I was going to leave, but Josh requested we stick around for a few more minutes. He wanted to wait for Nate, so he went to speak to the office admin. Francis tried knocking and even calling her office, but there was no response.

"Josh, I'm not waiting anymore," I said. "Isla, you coming?"

"I'm starving. Let's go eat," Isla said, hooking her arm around mine. "Come on, Josh." She nodded her head toward the door. "You get two beautiful dates for dinner. What more can you ask for?"

Josh pulled his phone out and started texting. "I'm letting Nathan know we're going to dinner." He looked up. "Where are we going?"

"There's an Italian place around the corner called Mario's," I said. "We can take one car since the parking sucks."

Josh shoved his cell into the back pocket of his jeans. "Sounds like a plan. I'll drive."

When we arrived, we valet parked and entered through the large, wooden doors. One thing I loved about Mario's was their friendly atmosphere. Not only was the food delicious, but everyone spoke Italian. The hostess led us to the last available table, placing the menus in front of us. Shortly after, the waitress took our drink and dinner orders and left.

"Hey." Isla smiled. "I bet they had a massive ugly fight."

Isla must have seen the frown I was trying to hide. I sucked at hiding my expressions. I took a deep breath after hearing Isla's words. As much as I wanted to believe Isla, I knew Nate. He wouldn't have left Josh hanging if they were arguing. At least the Nate I knew wouldn't have. We had both grown up and changed so much; maybe I didn't know him after all.

Josh's eyes grew as he came to his own conclusions on the topic. Though Isla was good at keeping secrets, I wondered just how much she'd told Josh about Nate and me.

"Yeah," Josh agreed with Isla. "She must be really pissed off at him." He rubbed his chin. "Why was she mad at him again?"

I waved my hand. "You guys don't have to try to make me feel better. I appreciate it, though. Nate and I are over."

Isla slammed her hand over mine, surprising me. "The hell you are! Did you tell him how you feel?"

I couldn't look at her.

She narrowed her eyes at me. "You didn't, did you? So this is your fault, not his. I'm not going to stress this point, but you left him."

"You left him?" Josh looked surprised, staring at me.

Crap! "Please don't say anything to Nathan. This topic is closed. Let's talk about something fun."

Just in time, the waitress came back with a bottle of wine. After she had poured our drinks, she left.

I lifted my glass. "To the three of us. May our careers soar."

"Ditto." Josh clinked his glass to mine and Isla's.

"To friendship." Isla tapped her glass against Josh's and mine. Isla placed her glass on the table after a sip and looked at me. "I can tell there is still something there between Nathan and you."

"Stop it," I said softly, pouring my second glass of wine.

"Whoa, slow down, Turbo," Josh commented.

"I'm serious," Isla continued. "I see the way he looks at you."

I pointed the glass at her and took a sip. "What you saw was his disgusted look for me. He probably hates me. He said he was acting professional. Anyway, I don't care. Those two can do whatever they want. I'm leaving for New York with you soon. Maybe I won't come back." I didn't mean it. I only said that to feel better.

Josh lifted one eyebrow, something I could never manage. "I bet if we did a couple trap, they could figure out whatever was left between them. Once that's done, they either move on with each other, or they find closure and go their separate ways."

Isla reached over and tapped Josh's hand. "That's a great idea. And I know just the place and when."

"What are you two talking about?" My face started to feel flushed, and I became warm all over. I'd had three glasses of wine and needed to slow down. Not having eaten much for lunch, I was practically drinking on an empty stomach. And I didn't hold alcohol well. "Couple trap? Like that really old movie? The Parent Trap or something like that?"

Isla shrugged, smiling giddily at Josh. They were silently communicating with waggling eyebrows and wide grins. Great. What were they planning? I tried to reassure myself they were just having fun and didn't really plan to take their scheme to fruition.

Our conversation shifted to Josh when our dinner arrived. He didn't like being in the hot seat when we asked him questions about his love life. In fact, he said it was nonexistent. A hot model like him—what was he hiding?

Josh looked at his phone when it made a bing noise. He picked it up, read it, and texted back. "It's Nathan. He apologizes."

"Really?" I cringed, sounding disgusted. "If he made plans with you then he shouldn't break them."

"Actually, we didn't have plans." He took a bite of his steak he had just cut. "We said we would play it by ear. However, since you lovely ladies asked to go out to dinner with me, I followed your plan."

"Oh." I wanted to break away from the topic of Nate.

"So what else did he say?" Isla asked, taking a bite of her salmon.

Josh stopped chewing. "Operation Couple Trap needs to be in full force ASAP."

Isla leaned in closer. If she had gotten any closer, her boobs would have fallen out of her shirt. "That bad?"

"That bad." He nodded.

"Hello?" I waved in the space between their faces. "I'm here. I don't need anyone to interfere or whatever you're doing."

Isla waved at me as if to shut me up. "Yes, you do."
Chapter Thirty

Nathan

I put on my robe, went out to the dressing room to get dressed, and came back. Checking my phone, I saw a text from Josh. I felt bad for sort of ditching him, but we hadn't made plans. Josh told me they were at Mario's and asked if I wanted to join them. I knew who 'them' was, and it felt strange to leave Kelly so I could have dinner with my ex and Josh. And I had a feeling Kelly wouldn't want to meet them for dinner. So, I texted him back to let him know I was sorry for the delay and I would catch him later.

"Are you hungry, Kelly?" I asked, using my fingers as a brush to comb through my hair. Kelly liked to lace her fingers through my hair when she was about to climax. It was one indicator for me that I was making her feel good, too.

"Yes. Where should we go?" She pressed down her skirt and ruffled her hair. "But...I would like it to be only the two of us."

"That's fine for today."

"What do you mean for today?" Her words slithered out disapprovingly.

I stopped reaching for the doorknob and turned. "Sometimes, I'm going to want to go to dinner with our friends after a shoot."

"You mean your friends," she snapped.

"They can be your friends, too," I reassured her.

She looked out the window. The sun was at its last stretch, dipping lower. "I don't think so." Kelly stood with her hands on her hips, as if to make a point. "We're not going to lunch or dinner if she's going to be there."

I glared at her. "You mean ever? What if it happens by chance? Are you going to walk out the door?"

She turned to me. "Yes. I'm not possessive, but something in my gut tells me I can't trust you and Olivia to be just friends. Exes can never be friends. I've tried before and it never worked out."

"That's crazy, Kelly." I took several long strides toward her.

"I mean it, Nathan." She crossed her arms to emphasize her authority. "I don't want you near her unless you have a session with her, but I can switch partners as needed."

My chest rose to the ceiling, never having had this kind of absurd demand made of me before. "You're kidding me, right? Do you know how ludicrous you sound right now?"

"No. I don't think I'm being unreasonable. I'm just protecting what's mine." Her hand trailed down my chest. "Nathan, in order for us to take the next step, we have to be honest. So, I'm being honest. I don't want you to be friends with Olivia. I don't want you to talk to her or visit her mom, or whatever you did with her, while you are dating me."

I wasn't sure if she was trying to make me feel guilty, but it wasn't working. Taking Kelly's hands, I gently placed them down by her side. "You can't tell me who to be friends with or not to be friends with. Olivia and I are trying to be professional. Why can't you do the same?" My tone was calm, but anger was creeping up on me.

Her jaw tightened as she gritted her teeth. "Because, Nathan, my ex cheated on me with his ex. I'm not going to go through it again. It took me a while to bounce back. I really care about you, but yes, I'm throwing out an ultimatum. If you can't do this for me then you're telling me you're picking her over me."

My hand contacted my face, but it felt more like a slap. "We're not at the level where you can tell me what to do, Kelly. We've all been hurt in the past, but that doesn't mean it's going to happen again."

She started to tap her heels to the rhythm of her own beat. "We've been hurt in the past? Olivia hurt you, didn't she? That's why you didn't want to talk about your relationship." Kelly placed her hand on her chest. Her eyes glistened with hurt. "I see."

I didn't want to lie to her so I kept quiet, trying to think of something to make this right. "Kelly, listen. There's nothing going on between Olivia and me. We don't talk on the phone. The only time I see her is during the sessions and when we all go out to eat. And that's all. Why can't you see this for what it is?"

She sighed. "Because I see the way she looks at you, and I see the way you look at her."

I caressed her arms. "We have a past. It's awkward being in the same room together, but we're doing it for the job. What you're seeing is two people trying to be friends and professionals. I don't know how else to stress that point."

Kelly stared piercingly into my eyes. "Make me feel secure about our relationship. Move in with me. And...my demand still holds. I don't want you in the same room with her unless it's for the job."

"Kelly." I shook my head. "I don't know how I'm going to avoid that."

Her lips were pressed into a thin line; nothing could separate them. Glaring, she said, "It's her or me."

"I can't promise you that, Kelly. It's impossible. There'll be functions and parties we'll have to attend. What do I do then?"

Kelly grabbed her purse, unlocked the door, and pushed it open. "Sleep on it. Hopefully, you'll miss me enough that you'll do anything to ease my stress. And by the way, the photographers are taking turns shooting different groups of models for M. Knight. I might not see you next week...just in case you want to apologize or change your mind." With that, she walked out of the office.

I grasped a fistful of my hair and growled. Going over our conversation in my mind, I tried to see if I had been unreasonable, but I didn't think I had been. In fact, Kelly demanded a bit too much, too early in our relationship. Sure, she had been hurt by her ex, but she shouldn't compare relationships and think the end result would be the same.

Seeing a new side of Kelly I didn't expect was a turnoff. I liked confident, mature, kindhearted women. And that was what I had thought Kelly was. Maybe I was missing something. Women and men thought differently, after all. One question still remained: why couldn't I just tell Kelly I would stop being friends with Olie?

A buzz from my phone broke my thoughts. I clicked on the email I had received from Matthew Knight. Congratulations! You have been chosen as the Sexiest Man Alive. Stop by my office first thing Monday morning.

The Sexiest Man Alive? I had to read it several times to make sure I wasn't seeing things. It took a few minutes for the news to settle in as excitement built inside me. I started to dial Olie. I couldn't wait to tell her. I pressed end before the phone had a chance to ring. What the hell was I doing? I thought of Olie first? Was I insane? It was a knee-jerk reaction. It happened before I had a chance to register what was going on. Releasing a heavy sigh and rubbing my hand up the side of my face, I paused for a moment. Oh, hell no! I wasn't going to fall back in love again. That ship had left the dock and sailed, never to return.

I didn't want to think of Olie, but I had. I didn't want to ask her for her opinion, but I almost did. Deep down inside, though I hated to admit it, a part of me was falling for her. She killed me slowly with her presence, her smile, and our memories, and I hadn't known until that moment. It was a slow-burning torture I had no idea was happening. But I didn't want us to reconcile because it still hurt too much. At the same time, if I let go of the pain, I could fall for her again.

I had to stop thinking. I didn't even know how Olie felt. Very likely there was no choice to be made. As far as Olie was concerned, she may not even have feelings for me anymore. And why was I thinking such thoughts? Damn it! She wasn't going to confuse me. I wasn't going to let her be the reason why I couldn't move on with Kelly. Focusing back to the great news again, I dialed my parents instead.

Olivia

By the time our two-hour dinner was over, I was completely sober. When Josh drove us back to our cars, Nathan and Kelly's cars were gone. My heart dropped, and it took a while before I could breathe again. Josh and Isla were going out again for drinks, but I had taken a rain check.

When I arrived home, Charlene and my mom were playing cards at the dining table.

"Hello, Charlene," I greeted, and then gave a smile to my mom to let her know I saw her, too.

Charlene placed her cards face down and got up to hug me. I gasped softly at her tight squeeze. That lady could give one hell of a hug.

"How are you, cupcake?" Her green eyes lovingly gleamed at me.

"Fine. How about you?" I asked to be polite. What I really wanted to do was get into bed and drown myself in sorrow.

Charlene took her seat, opened her cards again, and then looked at me. "Not so good. I'm losing to your mother. She has all the good cards tonight. So, how's Nathan? Did you guys have sex yet?"

Heat rose to my face. I looked at my mom inconspicuously. From the corner of my eye, I saw her eyes were wide and her jaw had dropped. Mom knew Nate and I had had sex when we were a couple, since I'd spent the night at his place many times. From my lack of expression, she knew the answer.

"I told you both. Have sex and you'll know," Charlene continued.

"Charlene." My mother sounded appalled. "Don't say that. She can't just seduce him when he has a girlfriend. That's wrong."

Charlene scowled. "She's not in high school. She's a grown woman who has grown-up needs. I'm just saying, whatever it takes to get her man back. If he came here to help her move, then he still has some lingering feelings for Olivia. I saw the way he looked at her. He's confused." Charlene shifted her body toward me. I still stood there, finally cooling, but she made me blush again. "Well, do you want him back or not? You've got to make up your mind before it's too late."

I slumped onto the sofa, taking in Charlene's words. "What if he doesn't want me?"

"What if he does and he doesn't know it yet? Your mom told me you were the one who left him. My God, Olivia, you said no to his proposal and moved to New York the next day. You're lucky he's even speaking to you."

I dropped my face into the palms of my hands and then looked up. "I know."

Charlene placed a card down on the table, giving my mom a challenging stare and a smirk. "Make the first move. Text him and tell him you need to talk to him in private. I'll invite your mom for lunch." She looked at my mom to confirm. Mom rolled her eyes. "You can have the whole apartment to yourself." She winked at me.

"Mom, you're going to Charlene's house tomorrow?" I asked, standing up and taking out my phone.

Charlene was right, and so was everyone else who had been trying to tell me the same thing—to tell him I wanted him back.

"Sure, why not? Tomorrow is Saturday and I have no plans." My mom shrugged, picking up a card from the pile.

"Okay, thanks," I said, feeling my adrenaline rise as I walked to my room and texted Nate.

Me: What are you doing tomorrow?

It only took Nate five minutes to answer back, but it felt like an hour. My heart raced, seeing his text. It was the first time I had texted him since I'd gotten back. I didn't know if he would reply, but when he did, I felt like a teenage girl all over again.

Nathan: Everything okay?

Me: No. I just need to talk to you.

I tried to make it sound urgent so he would have to come. I didn't know what his plans were, but if I didn't ask my question soon, I might explode.

Nathan: Sure. What about?

Me: It's too long to text. Can you meet me at my place tomorrow before noon?

Nathan: What time?

Me: How about 11?

Nathan: See you then.
Chapter Thirty-one

Olivia

I was finally going to tell Nate I wanted to give us a try again. Biting my nails, I paced the length of the hallway, compulsively checking my watch. Every second seemed to pass so slowly. A bunch of different scenarios ran like crazy through my mind. What if he told me he didn't want me? What if this destroyed our friendship for good, the little we had? What if he said yes?

I hated this feeling—the feeling of not being able to control the outcome and that everything was left up to fate. Charlene and Isla were right. I couldn't continue like this. Nate was only a short reach away, standing in the background, but I was letting him slip farther away. Worst-case scenario: I would have closure—a gut and heart wrenching one at that.

"You're not going to have any nails left if you keep biting," Mom said.

I looked at the remains of a manicured nail on my index finger. The purple paint was chipped off. I had never bitten my nails before. It indicated how nervous I was.

"How long are you going to be gone?" I turned to where she was standing by the sofa, ready to go with a jacket and purse in hand.

She took slow strides to stand in front of me. "However long you want me gone. I'm going to have lunch with Charlene, so take your time. I want you and Nathan to work this out, if there is something to work out. I'm wishing for the best, but you also need to brace yourself for the worst. I'm just a text away, so let me know if you want me to come home."

I nodded, feeling like a little child again. My mom's worried eyes made me even more nervous. Ever since Nate had helped us move, she hadn't bugged me about talking to him. Maybe she had discussed it with Charlene, but she stopped with me. Maybe she thought we didn't have a chance. And I was thinking too much again. The anticipation of Nate coming over was spiking my blood pressure.

"Well..." Mom embraced me and then let go. "Good luck. Make sure you tell him how sorry you are and that things will be different."

"I will." I walked her to the door and opened it. Inhaling deeply, I watched her head to the elevator and then closed the door. I still had about fifteen minutes before he arrived. I decided to turn on my laptop and check my usual sites.

I had sent a friend request to Nate when I first found out he worked for Knight Fashion. He had finally accepted. Going through his posts, he hadn't added any photos recently, but people were liking and commenting on the ones he had put up. He even had some photos with his fans tagged. I didn't know when they had been taken, but it was nice of him to take the time to pose for pictures with his fans.

Curious, I skimmed through some of his posts.

Saw @ModelNathanCross He's so hot #hotmodel #KnightFashion.

Then another one: Took a picture of @ModelNathanCross at #KnightFashion Love him.

Others went even further: I want to have your baby. Marry me, Nathan. @ModelNathanCross.

Do you have a girlfriend? @ModelNathanCross.

Though sometimes Nate would reply, I smiled at the fact that he hadn't replied to that one. My cell chimed, so I rushed over to my purse on my bed and picked it up.

Isla: Be calm.

Me: I am.

Isla: Liar.

I smiled, letting out a snort.

Me: You know me too well.

Isla: More than you think. Just letting you know I'm thinking of you.

Me: Thank you.

Isla: Text me later. I'll be dying over here to know. Maybe I can hide in your room?

Me: LOL!

Isla: I didn't think so.

Me: Where are you and what are you doing?

Isla: Meeting Josh for lunch.

Me: Really???

Isla: Don't think too much. We're just friends.

Me: Gotta go. The bell rang.

I dropped my phone on my bed and rushed out the door. Just before, I touched the bracelet Nate had given me to make sure it was on my wrist and checked to see if what I wore looked decent. All morning, I had rummaged through my closet for the perfect outfit. Nothing had seemed good enough. I finally decided on jeans and a black sweater with ruffles on the buttons. He wasn't going to get back together with me because he liked what I wore.

My legs suddenly forgot how to move, and every nerve in my body stood on alert. The perfect temperature felt too hot and my heart constricted tightly, like not enough blood pumped through my veins. As for my stomach, it was full of acid. My poor, throbbing head. It felt like a full-on anxiety attack. Placing my hand on the doorknob, I shuddered a breath. Then I opened the door with a smile.

"Hi—" I froze. My heart stopped. My breath was cut short. I should have looked through the peephole, but not expecting anyone else besides Nate at eleven o'clock, I hadn't bothered. Opening the door was going to be one of the biggest mistakes of my life.

"Hello, sweetheart. Did you miss me? I told you I would find you." His words were endearing, but his tone was evil and cunning.

"Troy," I murmured under my breath, trembling. I wanted to scream.

"Aren't you going to invite me in?" He arched his brows in a scolding manner.

"I'm expecting company. Can we talk another time?" I asked softly, intimidated by his presence. I hardly recognized my own voice.

His cold, angry eyes pinned me to the spot. "I don't think so."

Before I could slam the door, he shoved it open with his body—almost knocking me down in the process—and walked in.

Book 2, Sexiest Couple Alive

Sexiest Man Alive Movie Book Trailer

Produced and Directed by Dan Baker. dan@timidmonster.com

Written by: Dan Baker

Director of Photography: Gregory Gray

Production Designer: Sarah Nowlin

Cast:

Nathan Cross – Nathan Weller

Kelly Smith – Bailey Cook

Olivia Hunt – Jordan Alexa Arentz

Gaffer: Marcus Kent Hamson

Hair and Makeup: Emily Epperson

Editor/Sound Designer: Dan Baker

Still Photography: Michael Allen MichaelAllenPhotography.com

Special Thanks: Morgan Allen and Chris Raines

Dedication

I can't express enough to all my readers how much your support means to me.

To my friend Alexandrea Weis, you are my bestie, my rock, and everything to me.

Special thanks to Lisa at The Rock Stars of Romance, Shannon Hunt (PA), and Janie Iturralde-for all your help.

Enormous thanks to my team. I'm very humbled by your support and friendship: DawnMarie Carpintero, Debbie Poole, Stacey Nixon, Julie Barnard, Janie Iturralde, Marika Nespoli, Amber McCallister, Jasmine Albitos, Jennifer Garrison Treviño, Elvira Natour Porter, Wanda Lent, Susan Campbell, Cindy Honig- Fong, Nancy Byers, Susan Roberts McIntyre, Kyrie Lancaster, Judy Jones, Tiffany Rains, Brandy Lyon-Stuart, Elmeri Welman, Trisha Leigh PA, Amber Garcia, Myra Espino, Amber Hulsey-Lee

