In late December 2016, Forbes.com, a once
great digital website, published an anti-vaxxer
hit piece that plumbs the depths of the abyss
that is pharma-friendly editorials.
A few years ago, Forbes launched it's "AdVoice"
program which allows marketers to publish
directly onto Forbes.com alongside native
content.
One can only assume the separation between
journalism and advertising has been further
blurred since then and perhaps the pharma-friendly
author at Forbes named Steven Salzburg was
only too happy to offer some help.
Mr. Salzburg's byline is "Fighting Pseudoscience",
and he "authored" an article titled "Anti-Vax
Movement To Blame For Quadrupling Of Mumps
Cases This Year".
I'm not such a pushover, and if I worked for
Forbes, my byline would read "Fighting Pseudojournalism"
and my article would be titled "Forbes to
Blame for Quadrupling of Misinformed Idiots
This Year".
Why?
Because this article is probably one of the
lamest, most idiotic pharma-fan-boy articles
I've ever seen, and published in a semi-reputable
publication.
I can only guess it was nearing the Christmas
holiday and he was given temporary admin privileges
to publish his piece- privileges that have
since been revoked, I would hope.
Salzburg regularly authors pharma-friendly
articles such as "The Top 4 Flu Treatments
That Do Not Work (And 2 That Do)"- I'll bet
you can guess what the 2 that work are.
I'll give you a hint, they involve laboratories,
side effects and make people lots of money!
Ok- what about the Mumps outbreak, and the
Anti-Vaxxer movement that has caused it?
You no doubt have heard of by now a large
number of Mumps outbreaks around the country.
Over 4,000 people infected.
The author includes a graph to illustrate
the severity of the outbreak.
Not as many as 2006, when there were nearly
7,000 people infected,
but a good number compared to last year.
So why are we seeing this increase this year?
Surely there has to be a good explanation,
right?
According to Mr. Salzburg, "at least some
of the blame, if not all of it, belongs to
the anti-vaccine movement."
Mr. Salzburg is no slouch, as his bio indicates
that he is the "Bloomberg Distinguished Professor
of Biomedical Engineering, Computer Science,
and Biostatistics at Johns Hopkins University".
Whoa! Woo!
That is one LOFTY title Mr. Salzburg, so I'm sure he must
have a rock solid case for blaming an outbreak
of this magnitude on the anti-vaccine movement,
right?
This is Forbes after all, and I don't think
anyone would say something this accusatory
without conclusive evidence. I have to admit,
as an open-minded reader, I AM a little bit
confused, because I thought there were some
news articles saying the people who caught
Mumps were fully vaccinated.
Maybe they were just some lunatic fringe papers,
like the Wall Street Journal- isn't that the
one out of New York?
It said "all of infected students had received
at least two doses of the MMR vaccine by the
time they fell ill".
So I GET that some conspiracy theory sites
are going to say everyone who got Mumps was
vaccinated, but given that Mr. Salzburg is
the Bloomberg Distinguished Professor of Biomedical
Engineering, Computer Science and Biostatistics
at Johns Hopkins University, I'm sure he'll
make an airtight case for the Anti-vaxxers
causing this Mumps outbreak, right?
Wrong. I'm sorry to disappoint.
Not only does Mr. Salzburg not mention the
fact that everyone who caught Mumps was at
least doubly vaccinated for it, he doesn't
mention a single sentence about how anti-vaxxers
might have caused those vaccinated to catch Mumps.
Not a single theory, credible or otherwise.
If you've watched any of my other takedown
videos, you'll know that all vaccine-lovin'
idiots always refer to the same three things. Every time!
If you don't know them by now, I'm going to
summarize this absolute joke of an article
and include them in my summary: Recent Mumps
outbreaks have happened all over the DISNEYLAND
MEASLES!
Several thousand students contracted Mumps
and they are all HERD IMMUNITY!
It is clear by now the vaccine doesn't ANDREW
WAKEFIELD!
That's how these vaccine folklore articles
go, and this one is probably the shallowest
one I've ever read, and that is saying something.
I've read better on scary mommy and other
vaccine –addict blogs!
Very nice work, Mr. Salzburg, Bloomberg Distinguished
Professor of Biomedical Engineering, Computer
Science and Biostatistics at Johns Hopkins
University.
You have have broken the mold with this fine
reporting.
Is this real Forbes?
Are you seriously publishing this?
I thought he was fighting pseudoscience?
Traitor!
Anyway, for those of us anti-vaxxer refuseniks
who are capable of independent thought and
like to curl up by the fire with a thousand
Chrome tabs open to PubMed and JAMA articles,
we can offer you some clues as to what's going
on.
Actually we know exactly what's going on.
The vaccine sucks.
It doesn't work very good.
It never has.
In fact, several Merck scientists blew the
whistle a couple of years ago because Merck
was lying about how poor the vaccine was.
The scientists had been pressured into manipulating
their tests to make it look like the vaccine
was performing better, and Merck pushed them
a little too hard.
This case is still in court, and you've probably
never heard about it because well, it doesn't
paint our pharmaceutical protectors in a very
good light.
WE know a big reason there are Mumps outbreaks
amongst the vaccinated, the doubly vaccinated
and the triply vaccinated, and it's because the vaccine
has lost its efficacy (whether it originally
had it is anyone's guess).
Not to mention the fact that the current Mumps
vaccines is a live attenuated virus that doesn't
stimulate a very strong immune response- which
could be quite a recipe for chronic Mumps
infections on college campuses.
So if there's an outbreak, let's quadruple
vaccinate everyone for Mumps (and throw in
some Measles and Rubella just in case), because
the vaccine only takes 3 weeks to start working
and that will be sure to stop the outbreak
dead in it's tracks! Nice Job!
One other thing- and unlike Mr. Salzburg,
Bloomberg Distinguished Professor of Biomedical
Engineering, Computer Science, and Biostatistics
at Johns Hopkins University, I'm going to
freely admit we don't fully understand this
phenomenon, but Mothers used to get Mumps
naturally and pass their immunity on to their
children.
Because we vaccinate for Mumps now, girls
don't get true immunity to it, and can't pass
it on to their children like in the old days.
So my theory, which is backed up by science,
is that as there are more children born who
were never given any immunological gifts from
their parents (because of vaccines), the ineffectiveness
of the vaccines is going to become apparent.
That's what we are going to start to see.
More outbreaks, which are going to be blamed
on Anti-Vaxxers, but could be blamed on failed
vaccines, failed vaccine programs, and failed
human beings insisting more failure is the
way succeed.
Lost in the middle of all of this is Mumps
is a trivial disease.
Like Measles, it's a disease that was so innocuous
even 50 years ago people joked about it in
cartoons and Brady Bunch episodes.
All of this freak out over a stupid disease
no one cared about before there was a vaccine.
This is what government dependence does to
a soul.
It makes you scared of something your parents
and grandparents
(without anywhere near the medical care we have today) had no fear of.
The next time you hear of a Mumps outbreak,
a Measles outbreak, or some grandparent catching
RSV after getting their flu shot, please keep
Mr. Salzburg in your prayers.
He's likely to write another article.
And that is my incredible opinion.
