In some child development stages kids use
body language to communicate.
You see your kids crossed arms, but before
you ask - is my kid bad or is my child unhappy
- watch your own body language.
You shoul uncross your arms!
Traditional psychology tells us that crossing
arms is a defensive attitude.
The concept of defensive attitude is almost
automatic in adults as in children.
Let´s change that!
Children are extremely repetitive of what
are the attitudes of adults.
We have to bear in mind that a child, who
crosses his arms, probably does it because
he sees his father or mother to do the same.
Adults have the habit of being always with
their arms crossed.
They adopt this posture in situations either
where they want to transmit a strong attitude
of authority as in situations of a simple
conversation with friends.
The first thing that child will do in similar
situations, is to cross his arms too.
Some body language expressions, including
crossing arms are communication barriers.
We aren't aware of the negative impact until
we stop doing it!
We want to know how to foster a kid, how to
connect with a kid, how does a child personality
develop, how does a child's background affect
their development and we tend to forget that
they learn by emulate adults behavior.
If your child is always crossing her arms
the first thing to do before you tell her
to stop, is to look at yourself and try to
figure out if you have also the same habit.
If so, you should make an effort to correct
it.
Uncross arms brings the following problem:
where to put them!
Behind your back?
The answer is no!
Let them fall, let them visible, and the ideal
situation is if you are able to look at the
back of your hands, like fallen leaves.
It's a seemingly innocuous gesture but fraught
with a strong meaning.
Adopt a posture of uncrossed arms and fallen
hands, means that there is no intention of
aggression from that person.
If you do not have the courage to leave fallen
hands that way, then hang them behind your
back but always without crossing them as people
usually do.
Also do not put them in your pocket!
Your hands are to be free!
If you already did it, then you have now the
condition to change it on your child.
You may ask how are we going to uncross our
children's arms when they don't want to do
it?
The answer is, with one finger only!
Never grasp your children hand or arm in order
to obligate her to uncross her arms!
Even with the more carefully you get, is always
an aggressive attitude.
With your finger, on a vertical position and
from up to down, as if you untangled his arms,
you can do it!
You will feel that they will gradually open
slowly their arms, until they are completely
stretched.
What we are saying to our children is to simply
get comfortable, relax and let themselves
be.
It's a way to make them feel good, dropping
their arms as if they were leaves.
From the moment they do it, all their posture
changes, and changes because they know they
are no longer on defense or offense mode!
Now, it's time to talk!
This talking forks with the following rule,
the eyes on the same level.
