 
Just Life

Published by T. Scott Watkins at Smashwords

Copyright 2012 by T. Scott Watkins

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

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Table of Contents

Amy

Ed

Mai

Back to Amy

Joe

Indonesia

Mexico

AMY

As she waited for the traffic light to change, Amy watched the windshield wipers intermittently sweep away the light Seattle rain. The contrast between the cool, drizzly weather outside and the warm cocoon of her vehicle turned her thoughts inward, leading Amy to reflect on the course of her life as she made the familiar drive through the crowded streets of downtown on her way to work.

Amy Buchanan and her younger brother Wyatt were born in St Augustine, Florida, the oldest city in the United States. Their father was a successful lawyer in this small, prosperous city, while her mother had been involved in volunteer civic groups. Since she lived in a town with over five hundred years of history, there was always something to see. From the early Spanish history, she could visit the park commemorating the original expedition's arrival, complete with a small chapel, a cemetery, a visitor center, and interpretive signs along the beach. She and her friends could drink from the "fountain of youth," a spring so dubbed by Ponce de Leon. She also enjoyed visiting the Castillo de San Marco, a fort built, and used, by the Spanish to secure the harbor, with a labyrinth of rooms well suited to playing explorer or hide and seek with her friends. Even their family's church was historic, a cathedral built during the era of Spanish occupation. When her family went to church at Christmas and Easter, she could endure the long services by looking around at all the beautiful statues, paintings, and decorations, or enjoying the pageantry of the service itself. As she walked or rode her bicycle through the old part of town, she could see homes and businesses still standing from the eighteenth century. Maybe that was the reason that she had always enjoyed history in school, since she had been immersed in it all her life. When they wanted to do something fun for vacation or a weekend, Orlando and Daytona Beach were only an hour away. For a little girl, it was an ideal environment, with opportunities for fun at every turn, and a sunny day in which to enjoy them.

As she got older, Amy and her friends would come to the center of the city for shopping and people-watching. Original snowbird and oil billionaire Henry Flagler had built three large hotels around a park that defined the downtown of St Augustine. One was still a fine hotel, with a variety of shops on its ground floor. The second had become Flagler College, with a vibrant student community. The third had professional offices, a museum, restaurants, and a decorative garden. Her dad's office was on the third floor, so Amy would sometimes stop by, then go downstairs and have soda or coffee and listen to her iPod if she was alone, or sit and talk with a friend if someone else was around. Like many Floridians, Amy would stay inside, where it was air-conditioned, during the hot summers. But the rest of the year, she and her friends could play outside in the sun, hanging out at the beach, swimming, shopping, and playing team sports, primarily softball and soccer. She ran cross country and swam in high school, but her parents made sure that her extra-curricular activities didn't interfere with her schooling. As she tested her limits, in fact, Amy found that this was the main limit on her behavior. As long as she got good grades, wasn't rude or embarrassing in public, and didn't hurt anyone, her parents let her do what she wanted. They even bought her a nice car for her sixteenth birthday. Amy had thoroughly enjoyed every aspect of her childhood.

When she graduated from high school, Amy and two of her friends rented a house in Gainesville and attended the University of Florida, her dad's alma mater. In this college town, there was always something fun for her to do. She had quickly made some new friends of both genders, while staying in touch with some fellow St Augustine residents who were also attending the school. Her parents had required good grades of her as a youngster, and it felt good to be free of that burden. The party came to a sudden halt for Amy when her parents saw her first quarter grades. They had warned her that their support was contingent upon her continued academic success, but Amy didn't expect them to do anything if she failed to meet their expectations. She discovered how wrong she was when all her spending money disappeared. Due to her poor academic performance, they paid only her tuition, housing, and books during the second quarter of her freshman year. Amy even had to eat in the cafeteria, since her parents prepaid her meals. The quarter was interminable and embarrassing. She ran out of excuses when her friends asked her to go out, and soon they all pitied her for getting herself in so much trouble. For the first time in her life, Amy had to economize, and she didn't like it. Her protests wouldn't change her parents' mind, so she focused on her classes and homework and dramatically improved her grades. When she got her spending money back, she did a better job of balancing her academic and social lives, and completed her undergraduate degree with a very good grade point average. She applied to the graduate program in business, and was glad to be accepted. By this time, she had developed a great life for herself at the university, and didn't want it to end. She spent her weeks attending class and doing homework, hanging out with her roommates and going shopping. The weekends were for fun, with football games, road trips, parties, dates, and trips to the beach. At first, the constant stream of new experiences made each weekend an adventure. After six years, when she completed her master's program and passed the CPA exam, she was tired of the party scene, which now seemed childish to her. She decided it was time to take responsibility for her own life. She interviewed for several jobs the summer after college, and was pleased when she was offered a job in nearby Jacksonville working for the mortgage division of Washington Mutual Bank.

Amy didn't realize it at the time, but she started her career in the midst of an economic boom. An intelligent, confident, and attractive young woman, her position and income increased rapidly within the company. In retrospect, she and her colleagues should have seen the obvious, that customers' ability to make their house payments was the underlying fundamental of her business. At the time, however, consistent rapid appreciation in real estate allowed customers to use their house as a cash machine, constantly refinancing as the paper value of the property increased. Mortgage brokers such as Amy were able to make a very good living from the fees generated with each new mortgage. After a while, Amy transferred to Washington Mutual's home office in Seattle, where much higher home values promised even greater income. At first, Amy missed the warmth and near-constant sunshine of Florida, but she bought a wardrobe of coats, sweaters, and umbrellas and adapted to the cooler, wetter, but more temperate Seattle climate. She found herself loaning money to people who would hold the property for a year or so, make a considerable profit, and come back to Amy to finance an even more expensive property the following year. As she and her company floated along in the seemingly never-ending stream of commissions this shell game generated, it seemed as if she had found an easy way to perpetual success.

Then the attacks of September 11, 2001 occurred. The boundless optimism and supreme confidence that had supported the substantial rise in home prices for over a decade vanished almost overnight. Many of Amy's customers had taken mortgages that were very difficult to pay, confident that they needed only to hang on for a short time to realize a substantial profit. Suddenly, their home was worth much less than they owed, and many decided not to continue making payments. The nature of Amy's job changed almost immediately. She no longer spent her days initiating large loans with high commissions. Suddenly, very few people met the new, strict lending requirements. Instead, she was reduced to trying to collect delinquent payments as the company struggled to stay afloat. Her income went down, her own home decreased in value, and her stress level seemed to be the only thing climbing. Her supervisors kept her around as long as they could, but Amy joined the ranks of the unemployed when Washington Mutual finally failed.

After the bank job ended, Amy found herself very far from home, battling boredom and depression as she was turned down by one accounting firm after the next. A well-meaning personnel director finally told her that the bank failure had severely tainted her resume, making it unlikely that she would find work as an accountant in a weak job market. The bleak, short, wet, cold, gray days of winter were a mirror of the hopelessness she felt as her prospects and her savings dwindled. She widened her search, trying to find a niche job in which her skills would be useful. Finally, she spotted a job handling payroll, bills, collections, and financial reporting for a small dental laboratory in downtown Seattle. Chuck, the owner and general manager of the sixteen person business, didn't seem to care that her last job had ended with such failure, as long as she was willing to agree to the terms he was offering. By this time, Amy really needed work. Since this job paid more than her unemployment checks, she was eager to become the entire financial department of this small business.

"And that," she said to herself, "is how I've come to be riding a slow elevator rising through an old building in downtown Seattle, the only accountant in a chemical-smelling manufacturing business." Like many administrative employees in small businesses, Amy found that her job was ever-evolving. She wound up in charge of personnel, for instance, a task for which she had no training and little interest. But she did enjoy the varied nature of her job, and the relative freedom that came with unique knowledge and little direct supervision. Dental laboratories themselves, Amy mused, are a surprise. Like most of her friends, Amy had never wondered how crowns, veneers, partials, dentures, and the like were made. If pressed, she probably would have said, "I guess the dentist makes them in a back room." Over the last two years, however, she had discovered that dental labs are a unique business in which skilled craftspeople custom-make each dental device by hand. In this field, technicians must join mechanical precision and artistry to make all kinds of customized dental prostheses.

"Another day of elevator introspection", she joked to herself as she finally reached her floor and headed down the hall to the laboratory. Entering through the glass-fronted door into a well-lit, comfortable, but small reception area, she spied Jan Davis, the young receptionist/scheduler/delivery coordinator. After an exchange of pleasantries, Amy left her lunch in the break room refrigerator and headed to her office to begin her day.

Between bi-weekly payroll, interviewing, writing invoices and statements, purchasing supplies, collections, banking, and financial reporting Amy found that she was always busy. The only benefit of the personnel aspect of the job was that it introduced her to all the staff members. Her co-workers were a varied group. Some had schooling in dental technology, others had years of experience, while some had been trained by Chuck and his staff on the job. Some had been born in the United States, but there were several other countries represented, as well. They ranged in age from early twenties to late fifties. An unexpected benefit of Amy's involvement with such a diverse group had been a marked broadening of her understanding of the world around her, for which she was grateful.

After a busy day at work, Amy got back in her car, wound her way out of the garage, and took her place in the vast parking lot that is Seattle traffic. Surrounded by water, Seattle's series of bridges create bottlenecks in this bustling city that guarantee slow traffic at almost any time of the day or night. Fortunately, Amy had worked in downtown ever since she had moved from Florida, and her water-view condominium in Ballard, a northern suburb of the city, was only a thirty minute commute from the office in traffic. Arriving home, she again congratulated herself on the way in which she had decorated the place with attractive but surprisingly inexpensive furniture and wall coverings. By shopping at various discount "big-box" merchants, she had found a way to express her personal style yet not break her budget. Like her clothing and shoes, mostly bought on sale, she had assembled an expensive-looking lifestyle on a budget tightened by a relatively large mortgage and car payment. This prevented any real saving, but appealed to her aesthetic sensibilities and gave her a sense of parity with her friends. Before it became too dark for safety, she changed into her running outfit and did her usual four mile run. By running most days, she found that she could preserve her figure without starving herself.

One of the advantages of Seattle's cooler climate is the ability to exercise vigorously in the afternoon. In her native St Augustine, running on a summer afternoon is a recipe for heat exhaustion, whereas one could exercise at almost any time of any day in Seattle with appropriate clothing. As she returned to her condominium building, rode the elevator, and walked down the hall, she was struck by the number of people whose homes she passed every day without really knowing them. There were a couple of fellow joggers that she had waved at for years, but whose names she didn't even know. She could pick the occupants of the neighboring condos out of a lineup, but she didn't know the first thing about them. This was the first time, since going back to work, that she had been struck by the isolation built into her life. "I guess this is what I want," she reflected. "I work all week, and then go out on the weekends. I call my family from time to time, and visit Florida when the gray, cold Seattle winters get too long." Nothing had changed recently to make her question her lifestyle. But today, for whatever reason, her self-imposed isolation bothered her. As the week dragged on, she couldn't shake the feeling of isolation and lack of purpose that was growing within her. Amy decided that she would add some excitement to her life to eliminate these troubling thoughts. She hadn't been out on the town for a while. By Thursday, she decided to round up her friends for some weekend fun. Char must have been thinking along the same lines, however, since she called first.

"Hey Amy, you wanna go out tomorrow?"

"Sure, what's up?"

"Jada says she's up for dancing and meeting some guys. We both feel lonely and unsatisfied."

"I'm in. It must be something in the water, "Amy joked, "Because I feel the same. I'm stuck in a rut and I need to get out of it."

"Let's go clubbing in Pioneer Square."

The prospect of a night out on the town made the work day seem especially long for Amy. Fortunately, Friday was slow at the lab and Amy was actually able to leave a little early. On the way home, she mentally picked out an outfit that would be especially flattering. Once in her condo, the pre-party hair and makeup ritual that was so automatic that she could let her mind go. Even with the prospect of fun with friends, the isolation of her daily existence was still on her mind. She shook her head as if to drive off those thoughts as she selected the appropriate shoes, jewelry, handbag, and "protection." Amy confirmed by text message that Char was on the way to their favorite club already. Jada hadn't left yet, but that was typical. She had almost made fashionably late into an art form.

Char and Amy met in the parking lot and headed toward the loud music and subdued lighting of the club. The friends were a study in opposites, with Char's blonde hair and tan complexion contrasting markedly with Amy's almost black hair, pale skin, and blue eyes. They liked to joke that most people would pick Seattle native Char, not pale Amy, as the woman from sunny Florida. They each purchased a drink at the bar and found a small, empty table from which to check out the room. There weren't too many familiar faces, but the night was still young. The loud music didn't allow extensive conversation, but they were able to share a summary of their respective work weeks as they waited for Jada.

It wasn't long before Jada made her entrance. Tall and statuesque, she didn't quite stop the music as she entered the room, but it was unlikely that anyone failed to notice her arrival. Jada looked around for her friends, then spotted them in their out-of-the-way table and sat in the open chair. Unlike the other two women, Jada had not stopped at the bar. Jada NEVER bought drinks, and it was a standing bet among the three young women how long it would take for the first free liquor to appear. Tonight was a win for Char, as less than five minutes passed before a man sent Jada a drink. She nodded her thanks across the room, and then took a sip. "Where are all the hot guys tonight?" she asked.

"Now that you're here, we'll find out," opined Char. When they first met, Char and Amy had felt envious of and intimidated by Jada's supremely good looks. As they had gotten to know each other, those feelings had passed. Indeed, Amy and Char discovered that Jada was like honey for the single men buzzing around any club. Tonight was no exception. Soon their out-of-the-way table was surrounded by young men eager for a dance. Jada would only dance with one guy at a time, so there were plenty of handsome guys for her friends to enjoy. Soon all three ladies were out on the dance floor enjoying the freedom and physicality of dancing. Amy had come looking for a pleasant diversion from her troubling thoughts, and she had already met a couple of guys who could be just that. One in particular seemed drawn to her, and they enjoyed a sensual dance together. They ended with a passionate kiss, which the handsome, muscular man returned expertly. "What's your name," she asked. "Eric," he replied. She waited a minute to see if he would go on, but there was just silence. Not much of a conversationalist, Amy noted wryly. Since conversation wasn't really on her mind, this didn't bother her. She loved the way that it felt when he was holding her on the dance floor, and knew that she had found her man. She saw that her friends were romancing their own suitors, and let them know that she was going. She took Eric the Silent's hand and led him out of the club. He had come by taxi, and was a little too "buzzed" to drive, anyway. Amy's first drink had been her only one that evening, so she was able to drive them back to her place. Fortunately, it was a short drive. Eric's hands were all over has as she struggled to unlock the door, desire clouding her ability to perform even this basic task. Once through the door, she was able to reciprocate his passion. They left clothing strewn behind them on their rapid trip to the bedroom. She helped him with the "protection," and they made love. Eric was an excellent lover and, physically, Amy experienced exactly what she wanted. But, as they lay in bed together, the lack of emotional connection between them just drove home the feelings of isolation with which she had been struggling. Disappointed, Amy called a cab for Eric and sent him home. No promises, no overnights, she told herself, just a little diversion. Eric seemed satisfied with the one-night stand, so neither had to make any false promises about a non-existent future together. Amy locked the doors and quickly fell into a deep sleep.

She was dragged back to wakefulness by the phone's strident ring, seemingly in the middle of the night.

Half asleep, she slurred her hello.

Nothing but sobbing on the phone. Amy slammed the phone down in annoyance. "How juvenile," she thought to herself, "and in the middle of the night." She intended to block the call, but was too tired and groggy to push the right buttons.

The phone rang again. For some reason, she knew she had to fight through her annoyance and lack of sleep to pick it up. The sobbing was muted this time, and a female voice spoke her name.

"Yes," she replied, struggling to alertness.

"It's Char," then more tears. "There's been an accident. Jada's at Harborview and I don't think she is going to make it."

"Where are you?"

"I'm at the hospital. Jada's parents called me as soon as they heard."

"I'm on my way," said Amy, quickly pulling back her hair. She put on the first clean sweats she could find and dashed to the garage. Fear and sadness assaulted her as she drove towards the regional trauma hospital. The adrenaline flowing through her woke her more effectively than strong coffee as she drove through the almost deserted downtown streets. During the relatively short trip to the hospital, Amy dragged from her memory the prayers of her youth. She wasn't really sure if anyone was listening, but she didn't know what else to do. She found a parking spot in the emergency room lot, then strode quickly through the automatic doors and met Char in the waiting area. Fortunately, Jada was out of surgery and her parents had given Char her room number. As they walked down the hall, Char told Amy what had happened.

"Jada was going home with some guy. They both had a few drinks. He was driving too fast, lost control of the car, and crossed the center line. They hit an oncoming garbage truck, and the guy was killed immediately. Jada wasn't wearing her seat belt, and was thrown through the windshield. Fortunately, no one hit her as she lay, unconscious, on the road. The garbage truck driver called 911, and she was brought to Harborview. She has no injuries to her internal organs, but the massive blood loss and trauma to her head have left her comatose, and her vitals are very weak. The doctors have patched her up and given her transfusions. Now, all we can do is wait. The doctors don't seem optimistic."

At the end of this whispered conversation, they turned the corner into and approached Jada's room. Amy could see her friends' parents sitting next to each other inside the room, tears drying on their empty faces, as their child clung to life just out of Amy's view. Then she and Charlotte got their first glimpse of Jada in the bed. It was hard to believe that this bandage shrouded, intubated mummy had been, just a few hours ago, their beautiful and vivacious friend. Tears that had been locked up by the urgency of her frantic journey to the hospital finally flowed down Amy's face as she wept for Jada. It was shocking how quickly her lively friend had been reduced to a shapeless, immobile thing. If it weren't for the placard at the foot of the bed, Amy wouldn't have known her good friend was in the room. Amy stood by the bed for a while, trying to think of something she could do, and then coming to terms with her helplessness. Still weeping, she turned to Jada's mom and knelt down and hugged her, their mutual tears saying what no words could. She tried to reach out to Jada's dad, but he couldn't even meet her eyes. His sorrow seemed to imprison him within himself. Amy made a subtle gesture to Char, and they left the room, leaving their injured friend to her parents' and doctors' care. The two friends went out to the waiting room, surrounded by other worried people silenced by fear and grief and night.

Amy hadn't ever had to helplessly wait like this before, and she didn't know what to do with herself. Since she had moved to Seattle, Char, Jada, and her other friend Dawn had become her family. They were the ones who had listened to her struggles, shared her joys, and kept loneliness at bay. Amy had told herself that she would do anything for these faithful friends. All she could offer now was her caring presence, despite her desire to do more, so she sat in the nearby reception area waiting and wavering between hope and despair.

Dawn arrived shortly after Amy and Char had left Jada's room. It was no coincidence that Dawn had not joined them the previous evening. Amy had met Dawn shortly after arriving in Seattle, when she visited the parish in her new neighborhood. Dawn was the friendliest of the few single young women at the church, and, as they had gotten to know each other, she had helped Amy find her way around this new city. In time, Amy drifted from regular church attendance in Seattle, just as she had in Florida, but Dawn had remained her friend. Dawn somehow was able to devote herself to her faith, without pushing those around her for the same commitment. Amy appreciated the calm and joy that Dawn brought to the group when they were all together. In the past, Dawn had been a fun-loving part of the foursome on a variety of occasions. Lately, however, their weekend evenings had begun to revolve around clubs and subsequent one-night stands, activities from which Dawn would politely beg off.

Dawn went down to Jada's room for a few minutes, then she returned somber but not completely distraught. She examined a nearby map of the hospital, and then motioned for Amy and Char to follow her, and they walked down an unfamiliar hall, the only sound their shoes on the hard floor during the quiet of night in a hospital. They approached a room marked "interfaith chapel," and Dawn led them in. The other two hadn't even known that such a place existed. It was small and generically churchy. No one else was using it at the time. They sat down on one of the benches together.

"It's so unfair," said Char, "she is so young and beautiful, and now she looks like a cross between a mummy and a pincushion. Why did this happen?"

Dawn didn't answer the question with which Char and Amy both wrestled. But she retained her hope, even in the face of this tragedy. "I believe that God cares about Jada more than we do, and that he will not abandon her even now. As her friends, let's pray for her life to be spared. It's all we can do now, and I know God can help her."

Amy voiced their willingness to join in the prayer, as long as Dawn would lead. Char seemed somewhat reluctant at first, but her concern for her friend overwhelmed her trepidation. Dawn led them in a simple prayer of trusting petition. Amy joined heartily in the "Amen" to that prayer, and even Char seemed pleased. They sat in silence for a few minutes, silently absorbing the strength offered by the strong friendship that they shared. "Thanks, Dawn," Amy said, "I've been feeling helpless and hopeless since the accident. I want to help her, but don't know how. It feels good to do something besides worry." In her heart, Amy still wasn't completely sure if anyone was there to answer their prayer. She hoped that Dawn was right. They hugged each other and dried their tears, then left the chapel so that others could also enjoy it in privacy.

Back in the waiting area, time dragged on. The friends distractedly skimmed the variety of magazines, ate a snack from the vending machine, and sat quietly with their own thoughts. People came and went around them, and there were hushed conversations here and there, but the three friends were each dealing with the battle between fear and hope in their own way. Finally, Jada's parents came looking for them and the five of them sat down together.

"We've been told that Jada's turned a corner," said her dad. "The doctor says that our daughter's vitals have finally stabilized and that they expect her to live. Jada's still in critical condition, but we will get our girl back." His emotions got the better of him for a moment, and he paused to collect himself. "You girls should go home and get some sleep. We will text you with updates, and definitely let you know when she wakes up. Thanks for being here for Jada. We're glad that she has good friends who care so much about her."

They all hugged one more time, and then went back to Jada's room. She had made no movement or sound to indicate that she was healing, but the friends now had hope that the hidden internal changes found by the forest of sophisticated monitors surrounding her would eventually lead to her recovery. Jada's parents sat together on the small couch in the room, settling in for a night of vigil. The three friends took turns gently kissing the bandages on Jada's forehead, and then they left the room, walked together to the elevator, found their cars in the garage and went home. Amy had difficulty staying awake on the drive home, as the fatigue of a busy day, lack of sleep, and emotional trauma from Jada's accident caught up with her. Somehow, she made it home before she lurched to her bed and promptly fell into a deep sleep.

When she awoke the sun was shining brightly through the window. In such cheerful surroundings, the events of the previous night seemed like nothing more than a bad dream. Then, the clothes that she was wearing when she awoke, the messy bedroom, and the text update from Jada's mom on her phone were a sobering reminder that her friend was truly in mortal danger. The thoughts and emotions of the previous night poured over her. Amy remembered waiting at Harborview to find out if Jada would live or die. As she sat, surrounded by the light wood and modern decor of the waiting area, she had seen her life in a disturbing new way. What if she was the one who lay dying? If she had to write her own eulogy, there wouldn't be much to say. Sure, she hadn't done anything horrible. But she hadn't really made a difference in the world. She realized, for the first time, that life and being are truly precious gifts, and that they are lost more easily than she had previously realized. So far, she had squandered those gifts to such an extent that her existence would hardly be remembered. She realized that she needed to make a change, but wasn't sure what to do next. Her dalliance with Eric, however, seemed to symbolize her life of meaningless hedonism. She set about removing every trace of his presence from her home. As the laundry was running, Amy thought further about the transitory nature of life. Jada's life had changed forever in mere seconds. Unexpectedly, the phone rang, interrupting her reverie. Last night, it had been an unwelcome intruder, announcing doom. This morning, however, it was a welcome link with a reality outside her sorrowful and pensive self.

"Hi," said Amy.

"Hi Amy, it's Dawn."

"How are you doing?"

"I'm not sure. Sometimes, Jada's accident almost doesn't seem real. Then, it feels like it's the only thing in the world. I called to invite you to church with me. I know you don't usually go, but I thought you might like to come along today. I'd like some company, and we could have lunch afterwards, if you like. How are you?"

"I've felt confused. It seems unbelievable, yet I know it happened. It made me think about my life, as well. I don't want to spend the day alone, either. I'd love to come along."

"I'll pick you up at 11:30. We can decide on lunch after mass"

"It'll be good to see you. Thanks for the call and the invite."

After she hung up, Amy went through her hygiene, makeup, and dressing ritual. It was odd that she prepared for church the same way she had readied herself for her night out on the town. This trivial link juxtaposed the two events. The first had been a habitual, but ineffective, way of dealing with a loneliness that seemed overwhelming at the time. Now, it just seemed like another precious day thoughtlessly wasted. Perhaps Dawn and her church could help Amy find the greater purpose that she had realized only last night was lacking.

Dawn arrived promptly, and the two friends made the short trip to the parish in companionable silence. As they drove, she wondered why she and Dawn had drifted apart. When she moved to Seattle, Dawn had taken the initiative to become her friend. She always enjoyed spending time with Dawn, whose serenity and empathy made her a great listener in tough times, and her love of life made her a great companion. Amy realized that, when she had met Char and Jada, she had gradually drifted back into the fun-seeking lifestyle of her college years. The four of them had enjoyed day trips around Western Washington, visits at Starbucks, and attending sporting events and movies together. Gradually, however, Amy, Char and Jada had taken to "clubbing" as their exclusive weekend activity. Dawn would politely beg off, or suggest other activities. Gradually, however, she had drifted from the group. Jada's parents really liked her, and often asked why she was not included in weekend activities. Fortunately, they didn't realize how far apart the group had drifted, and they had called Dawn on the night of the crash. Amy was sure that Char was as glad as she was that Dawn had been with them during the vigil at the hospital.

Amy had a hard time convincing herself to open the door and enter when they got to the church. This was a very different feeling than the indifference that had always beset her in the past. She had resolved to attend, however, so she followed Dawn into the church, and they took a seat in the back and waited for the mass to begin. Amy looked around as Dawn prayed in preparation. A lot of the same people seemed to be attending as had been there years before. In some ways, it was like she had never left. The service began and she tried to pay attention to the sermon. She lagged a little as the congregation stood, sat, and knelt, but nobody seemed to notice. People were friendly but not intrusive when greeting her in the middle of the service. She didn't go forward for communion with Dawn, as Amy knew she was unprepared. They left the church with the sun still unusually bright, in good spirits. Dawn suggested fish and chips, a local specialty, for lunch. They drove to a nearby restaurant and enjoyed a pleasant meal together. Amy wasn't sure if Dawn would violate their unspoken agreement and grill her about religion, but the conversation turned to Jada and work instead. As usual, Amy enjoyed Dawn's company and arrived home in better spirits than when she left. She decided to finish her chores and get a good night's sleep in preparation for the week ahead. As she lay down, she thought of Jada and said a quick prayer. "It couldn't hurt," she thought to herself. She fell into a sound sleep, worn out by this roller-coaster weekend.

During the week, it felt like her job was a way to fill the time between the text updates on Jada's condition. Her heart leapt for joy on Thursday when she heard that Jada had awakened. She left work early that evening and went straight to the hospital. Char and Dawn had already arrived. They were all so cheerful; it was hard to believe that they had battled despair in the same room only a few days before. Jada's mom met them outside the room and hustled them down the corridor. "Jada seems alert and mentally sharp," said her mom, "but once they removed all the bandages, we saw the facial injuries from her ejection through the window. At this point, she is hard to recognize. We are the only ones who have seen her so far, and we haven't told her about her scars yet. Please don't call attention to her appearance. We only want to focus on our gratitude for her survival."

With a warning like that, the three friends approached the hospital room with trepidation. When they first came through the door, they could see that Jada was sitting up in bed, with all the bandages removed. As they drew closer, they could see the damage from the accident. The angry red scars and extensive swelling made her unrecognizable as the beautiful girl that they had known. Dawn took the lead again. "Hi, Jada, how are you?"

"Very sore, but otherwise good. I hear that I'm lucky to be alive."

"We're grateful that you survived. When we first heard about the accident, we were so worried. We saw you in a coma, and didn't know if you'd make it. It's great to see you awake and to talk to you again."

Dawn backed this up with a gentle hug, which made Jada wince slightly, and a kiss on her scarred cheek, just like she had always done. Trust Dawn to honor Jada's parents' request by overcoming whatever aversion she felt and treating her friend as if she were completely intact. Amy watched their interaction, and knew that Jada would suspect nothing due to Dawn.

"How much longer do you need to stay here?" Amy asked, to make conversation.

"Another couple of days. After that, I'll go to mom and dads for a while then get on with my life. Has anyone been watering my plants for me?"

Jada was pleased to discover that Char had been taking care of her apartment. Obviously, she thought that her life would continue unchanged. Amy cringed inwardly as she realized what a shock was in store for her friend when she saw how badly her face was marred. She wanted to help Jada get better, but it felt wrong to keep such a life-altering truth from her friend. She knew that Jada, concerned as she was with her appearance, would find out soon enough. Her first stop, when she got out of bed, would be the mirror in the bathroom. Amy hoped that she would be strong enough to stand what she would see. The three friends were silently and separately coming to realize how completely and swiftly Jada's life had changed. They talked with her for a little longer, surprised by how quickly she had become so alert, then excused themselves and went out to the parking garage together.

"Can you believe how awful she looks?" said Char, getting right to the point. "She's lost everything, and doesn't even know it. How is she going to model with a face like that?"

"We should've told her," said Dawn. "Her parents have good intentions, but they're wrong. She's not going to take this well."

"I think they did the right thing," argued Amy. "As they said, she can focus on getting out of the hospital, then deal with everything else later."

"We may need to help her ourselves," said Dawn. "I think the accident is going to turn things upside down for her, and she may not be able to support herself, at least for a while."

"Hopefully the guy had insurance, because she's gonna need some money," said Char, ever the pragmatic one. "Her looks were everything. Without 'em, what's she gonna do? Maybe she can go back to school or something."

"We sound like we're at a funeral. I'm glad I got my friend back from the dead. I'm going to focus on the positive and help her rebuild her life." Later, Amy would regret the major commitment she had made with this cavalier statement. At the time, she had only wanted to remind the others that true friends stick together and help each other, in good times and in bad. Amy wondered if their group would survive this test of their friendship, or if they would drift apart in the face of the problems that seemed likely to come. Amy's challenge effectively finished the conversation, and they went their separate ways.

Amy finished up her work week, and then the weekend stretched out in front of her. Partying was the last thing on her mind; but that had been her go-to spare time activity for so long that she wasn't sure what to do with herself. She did her running and her chores, but it didn't take long to get her place spotless, the laundry cleaned and the groceries purchased. She called her parents and told them about Jada's accident. They seemed genuinely saddened by this tragedy in the life of a girl that they had never met. The weather in St Augustine was as sunny as ever, and they discussed a possible visit, although Amy would first need to save some money and vacation time at work. They reminded their daughter of their pride in her, and talked about local events and Amy's old friends. Having a normal conversation about everyday things with people who loved her was just what Amy needed.

Sunday, Dawn offered to take her to church again, but Amy begged off. She couldn't quite bring herself to become a regular church-goer again. She was watching a movie and, truth be told, wasting time when her phone rang. The caller ID on her phone told her that her friend Jada was calling. This was the first time she had called since the accident. Amy was excited as she picked up the phone.

"Hi, this is Amy. How're you, Jada?"

More sobbing on the other end. Amy decided that her phone must be cursed. If she didn't quit getting calls with more tears than words, she was going to destroy the thing.

"What's up, Jada?"

"Whadda you mean, what's up? You saw me! I grossed myself out when I looked in the mirror. I'm a human hamburger patty. Why didn't you guys tell me? I thought that you were my friends, but I've seen your true colors now. I'm UGLY," she cried out, as the anger gave way to more sobbing. "I guess you don't have to be jealous of me anymore. Now you and Char can be the beautiful ones." Amy was taken aback by the anger and spite of her friends' words. Obviously, Amy should have listened to her conscience and told Jada about her appearance. She had to remind herself that her friend was trying to shoulder what could be, for her, an impossible burden.

"Your parents asked us not to call attention to your appearance, but to focus on your health. We were trying to help you stay positive, hoping that would speed your recovery."

"Why now? Mom has always been focused on my appearance. My beautiful daughter, don't eat this, this is bad for your complexion, beauty pageants since I was young, treating me like her Barbie doll. Now this. What am I gonna do?"

Amy hoped that this was a rhetorical question, because she had asked herself that question and had no good answers. If any of her friends was defined by one thing, it was Jada. Her income, her self-image, and her whole schedule revolved around her amazing appearance. Before the accident, Jada's beauty had seemed a strong foundation for her life. Now, they both knew how weak that foundation had been. The silence stretched out, and Amy realized that she would have to answer the unanswerable question. "Come on over, and we can hang out"

"I can't go out of the house like this. I don't want anyone to see me. I don't know what to do." Jada sounded desperate.

"Well, I had a busy schedule of doing nothing set up for this afternoon," Amy said, trying to inject some levity into the conversation. "I'll grab a movie and a snack and come over to your place."

"Thanks, Amy. I need you guys right now. I just don't know what to do."

Amy stopped at the store to get a video and some ice cream, and then made the drive over to Jada's apartment. Most of it had stylish decorations and was spotlessly clean. The living room, however, was a mess, with the sofa at its epicenter. There were clothes, take out boxes with half-eaten food, and facial tissues littered all over the room. The fact that fastidious Jada had left things in such disrepair spoke volumes about her state of mind.

Amy said a quick "hello" when she arrived, then busied herself straightening, cleaning, and starting a load of laundry. She tried to look at Jada, so that she didn't make her feel self-conscious. Then, she realized she was almost staring at Jada, and looked away. She knew that the best thing for Jada was a normal interaction, but Jada's pronounced scars still were somewhat startling. Try as she might, she could not consciously replicate the normal level of eye contact that occurred subconsciously. This made Amy feel somewhat awkward, and probably had the same effect on her friend.

Amy got the movie going right away. They sat in companionable silence during the comedy, with Jada trying to escape from the reality of her difficult situation, while Amy tried to decide what to say. After the movie, they started to talk. Jada seemed to have grasped well the implications of the accident. While her parents had initiated a lawsuit against the estate of the young man who had been driving the car while drunk, and it looked like they would win in court, it might take months to resolve the case. Jada had called the modeling agency for which she worked and resigned. She told them that she had been injured in a car crash, but implied that her injuries only limited her mobility. Jada told herself that this kept the door open for her to come back, but, deep down, she knew that she was kidding herself. She told Amy that she had never accumulated any savings. It seemed that she would go on earning a good wage forever, so she spent all she earned on the artifacts of an upper-middle-class lifestyle. Now that she had no income, and no prospect of employment, she realized that her situation would quickly become desperate. Her parents were unable to help her. Like her, they had no real savings. In good economic times, they had never earned very much money, and had immediately spent whatever they made. During the recent recession, Jada's dad had been out of work from time to time. They had barely managed to sell their house of twenty years, with little to show for it, and were renting a small apartment. Jada knew well that their expectation was that her modeling success would be the windfall that would pay for their retirement. They wanted to help her, but they could barely help themselves right now.

Jada told Amy that she would get one last partial paycheck, which would probably cover one more month on her lease. After that, she didn't know how she would take care of herself. Jada started to cry as she spelled out the hopelessness of her situation. Amy sat next to her and gave her a hug. She realized that she could help Jada, if she wanted to. She remembered her own words at the hospital, and decided that it was time to make good on her promise to help Jada rebuild her life. Amy offered to let Jada stay with her for a while. Jada agreed quickly. The friends planned an estate sale for most of her possessions, since Amy didn't have enough room for lots of furniture and other household goods. They would rent a small truck and move Jada's bedroom set, clothing, and some household goods to Amy's condo during the week. Amy even volunteered to talk with Jada's landlord about ending the lease early, and planned on hosting the estate sale, as well. Jada finished packing on Wednesday. Amy had her spare bedroom ready by that time, so they moved her things into Amy's apartment well after dark. "That way," Jada said melodramatically, "no one has to see my ugliness."

Thus began a very trying time for Amy. The estate sale was boring, yielding very little income in exchange for a whole day of her life. The landlord was disagreeable at first, but Amy offered him Jada's deposit as an early termination penalty, and he agreed to let Jada out of the lease. The two women showed their appreciation by cleaning the place from top to bottom the week after the estate sale. Jada had enjoyed her place and was sad to leave, but she had no other options. Amy hoped that a new location would help Jada get ready to build a new life for herself.

However, Amy didn't realize how much her new roommate would change her own life. Jada was home all the time, fearful of going out in public. She would lie around the house and mope. Or, she would talk about her "disfigurement" and expect Amy to commiserate. Sometimes, she would even complain about their strained finances. It seemed that she expected Amy to resolve all these problems for her. Amy wasn't prepared for these demands, especially after a long day at work. She realized that, over the last few years, she had gradually become completely self-centered. She hadn't set out to become that way, but the isolation that had been troubling her of late, as well as her general self-sufficiency, had gradually led her in this direction. She would never have noticed this change had Jada not taxed the limited resources of empathy that she retained. It was more like having a child than a friend staying with her. When Jada had first moved in, Amy had felt compassion for her difficult situation. As time dragged on, and Jada made no effort to help herself, Amy had less and less sympathy for her plight. No longer was she eager to get home from work, because Jada would start with the same complaints as yesterday, last week, and last month, and Amy would be required to provide words of comfort and reassurance that were seeming more trite every time she said them. Lying on the sofa wasn't doing Jada's figure any favors, either. This pathetic self-pity was disfiguring Jada's personality and physique like the accident had marred her face. Before Jada's accident, each woman had been both self-sufficient and independent. Now, Jada's extreme dependence and Amy's lack of practice in the art of nurture and compassion had created an atmosphere of rapidly building tension. One or both of them would have to change to prevent the coming explosion. But Jada had no desire to do so, and the process was so difficult for Amy that she was ready to give up.

After the accident, Amy had taken financial responsibility for Jada. Dawn didn't know Jada as well, at the time, and hadn't realized how little money Jada had saved. Jada had moved in with Amy before Dawn realized that she needed help. Dawn tried to help by visiting Jada and Amy regularly, encouraging Jada to get through this bad time and find hope for a good, new life on the other side of this dark valley. These regular visits were Jada's only contact with the outside world, besides Amy and the occasional call from her parents, who didn't seem to know what to do with their helpless daughter. Jada would sometimes seem hopeful when Dawn was around, but would sink back into despair as soon as she left. The scars continued to heal, and the initial swelling had, of course, disappeared. If she was in better shape, an objective observer would have said her appearance was just a little below average. She was certainly not as grotesque as she thought she was. With makeup, she could probably hide the scars from a casual observer. Amy encouraged Jada to run with her, to lose some weight and get out of the house, but Jada was afraid of what people might say. She seemed to envision a crowd with torches and pitchforks chasing her down the street. Amy told her that her fears were irrational, but Jada couldn't believe her. Amy was getting more and more frustrated with her. Although she tried not to show it, Amy was coming to despise Jada almost as much as Jada did herself. Over time, Amy's disdain was increasingly apparent.

Finally, things got to the breaking point.

"Why do you keep me around, if you hate me so much?" asked Jada, so hurt that she was prepared to hear an honest answer.

"You are so damn pathetic that you would starve if I kicked you out, and I couldn't have that on my conscience."

"Maybe that'd be better. Then I wouldn't be a parasite anymore."

"Maybe that WOULD be better. I don't know what happened to my vivacious friend, but I can't stand the slug that has taken her place."

"The vivacious friend died in that accident. I'm all that's left."

"Maybe you should have died. Then you wouldn't be making us both so miserable."

Jada broke down in tears, and Amy slammed the door and went down the stairs in a fit of anger, deciding that she would run off the hot emotions that pushed her out of the condo like a jet engine. Running would also give her some time to think. Mulling over her argument with Jada, and the events of the previous few months, Amy started to analyze some of her closely held assumptions.

Running almost every day, she had spent plenty of time outside. Usually she was just passing through the natural world on her way to a goal. Today, she looked around and really saw the details of the world around her. Everything was so intricate and interconnected. The many different plants, each with its own niche, growing, reproducing, and changing while living its own life. However, all these plants together provided all the life-giving oxygen that flowed in and out of her lungs and a home for insects, birds, and some small animals. As they grew in the sun, they became the source of almost all food in the world, not as a "goal", but as a byproduct of their own life and growth. Amy had previously seen the world around her as a trivial ornament to her life. Today, she could see it gave her life.

She had always thought of herself as a self-made woman, earning all that she had solely through her own efforts and amply deserving the comforts and joys of her life. Today she could see that she also had always depended on the support and care of others. After all, it was her parents' generosity, not just her own hard work, which had gotten her through college. In her career, many people had helped her adapt to new situations and overcome her mistakes. As an American, she had always lived at a level of peace, security, and plenty relatively few people worldwide enjoyed, which had been created and defended by people she didn't know and would never thank. Even the strength and good health she had always enjoyed was a blessing, not an entitlement, as Jada's accident had demonstrated. When she examined things at a deeper level, she realized an even greater debt was owed to the Being from whom all these things had come. This was what she had missed in church growing up. True religion was nothing more than giving thanks for life in all its fullness, acknowledging the One from whom it all sprung.

What was she doing with this life that was made valuable by the extensive effort invested in it by everyone and everything around her? She realized that she could make a list of accomplishments at work or experiences gained, but the truth of the matter was that she was constantly taking in assistance from everyone and everything around her, and really giving nothing back. Previously, she had thought that she was the primary source of her own existence, so it was hers to use however she wanted. Now, she could see that she was like a sponge, absorbing all these benefits without letting them flow through her back into the world from which they came. For the first time in a while, she was very thankful for her opportunity to help Jada. In the court of her own heart, she realized that her care for Jada was the only significant thing she had done to balance the scales , the only time she had given back some of the gifts that she had received with no prospect of repayment. She reminded herself how grudgingly she had given to Jada, lately, and realized that her one "repayment" was a rather weak one, indeed. "Well," she told herself, "at least I've started doing something. I will happily do all I can for Jada, while looking for ways to give back to the world and its Creator that have given so much to me."

Amy ended her run with a feeling of calm and purpose that she had not felt in years. Entering the condo, she saw her scarred and defeated friend sulking on the sofa, as usual. Amy's habitual loathing and anger welled up, but she quickly replaced them with compassion and concern. Jada had her back to Amy, and didn't look around when she heard Amy come through the door. Amy went quietly and swiftly to her friend and gave her a big hug, something she hadn't done for a long time. Jada stiffened for a moment, and then relaxed in her friend's arms. Conscious of how sweaty she was from running, Amy let Jada go after a moment, then went around the sofa and sat facing her friend. "I'm sorry for being such a bitch over the last few months," Amy said. She reached over and took Jada's hand. "Please forgive me for being so rude. I've finally realized how glad I am to have you here. I really want to help you. I will start being a good friend to you again."

Jada gently squeezed her hand in acknowledgement and acceptance of Amy's apology before she replied. "It's been confusing for me. I appreciate your help, but you hurt my feelings, too. I just haven't known how to make things right between us. Between your spite and my despair, sometimes I've regretted surviving the wreck. "

"I'm sorry for being so mean. Let's leave the past behind us, and enjoy being together. We've known each other for a long time, but I want to become best friends in the months ahead"

The women sat together in silence for a while, enjoying the warmth of a renewed friendship. Then Amy realized how sweaty she was, and went to get showered and dressed. She left Jada by herself on the sofa, but realized gratefully that they had parted on good terms for the first time in a long time. This only added to the joy that she had previously found on her run. Amy basked in the interior sunshine of her new insights and renewed friendship as she showered, dressed, and relaxed at home for the rest of the day.

"What goes up must come down," Amy thought ruefully, as the work week wore on. The mountaintop experience of the weekend was great, but the frustrations intrinsic in any job, and the financial strain on her already tight budget from Jada's living expenses, put a gray cloud over her mood. Coming home, she would usually see Jada sitting around doing nothing on her dime. When she saw this, she had to swallow her habitual resentment and disdain, forcing herself to treat Jada as a friend and guest in her home. It wasn't too long before this self-discipline started to bear fruit. After a while, she didn't have to work so hard to be glad Jada was around. Also, Jada seemed to make up her mind to help out. Amy hid her surprise on Monday when she got home to a cooked meal and a clean condo, but thanked her friend for her contribution. As the week went on, it was apparent that Jada had decided to take care of the condo while Amy was at work. Amy enjoyed the warm dinners in a spotless home. It was nice to discover that kindness and graciousness to each other created an upward spiral of respect and peace, just like rancor and selfishness had made their home descend into emotional toxicity. Jada was still a shadow of her former self, but she had a spark in her that had been absent since she had left the hospital. Physically, the swelling from her injuries had all gone, but the scars that crisscrossed the visible parts of her body were still evident. Her doctor told her that she was completely healed. Without expensive plastic surgery, Jada would be scarred for the rest of her life. The months of inactivity had taken a toll on her physique as well, and a stranger who had seen her before the crash would not have recognized her in her current state.

The news that her scars would not fade further was a setback for Jada. She took a couple of days before she resumed her self-imposed duties around the house. Amy decided to encourage her to get out of the house. She knew that Jada's fear of going out in public was preventing her from rebuilding her life. Amy decided to give her friend a push in the right direction

"Jada, you gotta get out of the house. You're wasting your second chance at life."

"I can't stand for anyone to see me like this. I'm disgusting."

"You don't look as good as you used to. Few people do. But you look much better than you did in the hospital. You still have scars, but it's not like you're a monster or something. Put on some makeup and most people won't look twice at you."

"What's the point? I'll never be myself again. I'll always be ugly. Who will want me now?"

Finally, they had gotten to the heart of the matter. Just as the beginning of Amy's growth had been the realization of her narcissism, Jada was trapped in a prison of vanity that she and everyone else in her world had worked to build. Amy realized that she would have to choose her words very carefully.

"Jada, do you remember our last fight? You were right, in a way you did die in that accident. You were the beautiful one. You looked great, but you were like a cartoon character. Your looks were your only strength. You need to bury that one-dimensional woman and be reborn as a whole person, not just a pretty face. You could have developed your mind and personality before, but you never did. Let's work together to raise a new Jada from the ashes, a full person, not a cartoon character."

"Amy, I hear you. But I don't know if I have the strength to try."

"In the hospital, the rest of us learned how much you are worth. When we thought you would die, in my heart it felt as if I were falling through an endless black void. When you woke up, we were so happy to see you. You were ugly, but we didn't even care! We were so glad to have YOU back; we didn't care what you looked like. I hope you can learn to feel the same joy in your second chance at life."

"I don't know where to start."

"We can't figure it all out today. Let's just make a plan to get you out of the house."

Amy wondered if she would have to force Jada to leave the house. She didn't want to damage their friendship by doing that, but felt strongly that Jada could not begin anew without conquering this fear. As Amy was wrestling with these thoughts, Jada made her decision. "Alright, I trust you. You have shown yourself to be my best friend. This will be very hard for me, though. Please help me."

The friends made plans to go grocery shopping in the middle of the night at the neighborhood Safeway. "Baby steps," Amy thought to herself. The next day after work, she came home and took a nap, then set her alarm for eleven pm.

When she awoke, she found that Jada hadn't slept. "I'm so worried. I know it's dumb to be afraid of grocery shopping, but I can't stop worrying that people will laugh at me. Let's go before I change my mind."

So they grabbed their list, got in the car, and off they went. Since Jada had moved in Amy found that she had to make every dollar go further, so grocery shopping was less a matter of "what do I want to eat?" and more a matter of "how can I stretch my food budget." Prior to Jada's arrival, both of them had given little thought to their expenditures on necessities. Now that they lived on one salary, they had learned to eat what they could afford, and dine out very rarely.

The trip went fairly well. Amy wore no makeup and sweats, and Jada only used a little foundation to hide some of her scars. They pushed their cart up and down the aisles with the few people who were also shopping that night. Jada did get a couple of people who stared at her or obviously looked away, and the checker made them uncomfortable by trying to look at anything but Jada's scarred face, but the trip was relatively uneventful.

"So, no angry mobs and pitchforks," joked Amy, secretly glad that things had gone as well as they did.

"You're right. Some people were taken aback by my scars, but no one was rude or mean. Thanks for making me take this trip, and for being such a good friend to me. If you keep helping me, I'm ready to become the new Jada that we talked about."

They put the groceries away and fell asleep, exhausted from their odd schedule. Amy found herself being a little short at times with her co-workers the next day. In the past, she would have given herself excuses for being rude. Now, she was able to use the skills she had learned from living with Jada to act more pleasant than she felt. She was rewarded with a much better day than the last time she had been this tired, and had given free rein to her acerbic wit. Perhaps she could use the skills she had learned at home to improve the environment at work as well. After work, she and Jada made plans to start running together in the morning.

Jada had lost a lot of strength and endurance during her hospital stay and her self-imposed house arrest. Both women were surprised by how little distance she could cover. Amy found that she enjoyed encouraging Jada and helping her to get back into shape. Jada decided to wear a hoodie that hid her face due to the cool fall and winter weather, and found that a lifetime of physical fitness was not entirely lost in a few months of self-pity. Gradually, Jada reached the point at which she could join Amy for all four miles. Furthermore, this daily public appearance gradually made her feel more at peace with her scars, and she noticed less and less the examination of people around her. Her ease in her own skin seemed to make others more at ease around her, and she learned how to use makeup to better blend the damage from the accident.

A turning point came with the resolution of Jada's court case. Jada's loss of her beauty-based job had left her entirely without a means to support herself, and had it not been for Amy's charity, she might have found herself homeless. Now, even though she was no longer lost in self-pity, she had had no means to rent a place, and no real ideas for gainful employment. When the settlement for the accident came in, she suddenly had options. She could use the money to live like she always had until it ran out. However, this would leave her in the same predicament in a few years. She decided to invest the money in herself by going back to school. Little known to her friends, Jada had always had good grades. Although she secretly worried that her professors were grading her appearance rather than her knowledge, the fact remained that she had finished her undergraduate degree with good enough grades that many doors were open to her.

Jada had planned to work as a model, then perhaps work in the entertainment field or get married. She hadn't really considered a "high-powered" career. But her court battle after the accident had shown her how much effect the practice of law could have on a person's life. So she decided to use her newfound wealth to pay for law school. When she told Amy about her plans, Amy was delighted, and offered to let Jada stay with her until she completed her schooling and got a job. Amy knew that Jada has received a sum of money, but did not care to know how much. Jada agreed to pay half of the household expenses, making the plan even more attractive. Jada was glad that Amy would let her stay. She knew that Amy's encouragement had been pivotal in the progress she had made so far, and she would need her support through the challenges ahead.

Jada had found a purpose. She was now running with Amy every day. In fact, if Amy had a hard time getting out of bed to run, Jada would wake her up. While Amy was at work, Jada prepared for the LSAT, the law school entrance exam. She went through three different preparatory programs online; to be sure she was ready for the real thing. Although it had been a while since college, she was making up in dedication now what she had lacked in attentiveness then. Jada discovered that there were several good law schools in the Seattle area. After some internet research, and a few campus visits, she decided to enroll at the University of Puget Sound, and began the application process. When the time came to take the actual LSAT exam, she had prepared so thoroughly that the test wasn't difficult. Jada was fairly confident that she had achieved an acceptable score.

Jada's decision to become a lawyer was the pivotal part of her recovery. It allowed her to develop a new way of seeing herself. Until she decided to go to law school, she had been trying to live with the fact that she was a deformed former beauty. Some days had been better than others, but this self-image was based upon feeling less than what she knew she could be and, more importantly, had been. Now, she could think of herself as a law student. Since this self-concept was based upon her thoughts and intellectual effort, which were fortunately unaffected by the accident, it gave her room to grow and succeed. When people stared at her or pointed, they were not insulting the core of her being any longer, so she could more readily recover from the emotional blow.

When the letter finally arrived, Jada was very pleased with her LSAT scores. While she had been waiting for those scores, she had been working to meet the requirements of the UPS admissions staff. Her university had not sent her transcripts correctly. Jada had to call, email, and visit a few times to get that mistake corrected. Finally, everything was in order, and she and Amy were jubilant when she was accepted for the coming fall semester. Throughout this process, their relationship had changed as Amy had hoped. Amy had abandoned her desire to feel superior, and Jada had mostly lost her feelings of inferiority. After all they had gone through, they were closer than ever. Each of them had a challenge to meet during the day, and a friend with whom to discuss it in the evening. Their spare time activities had changed as well. When Jada first moved in, her insecurities and their lack of funds had kept them home on the weekends. After Jada received her settlement, they had become accustomed to renting a movie, visiting with Dawn, going for a walk, or occasionally going out to dinner. Suddenly, they had enough money to visit the club scene. Jada wanted to go out, but Amy was reluctant. Something about this new, quieter lifestyle agreed with her. Nonetheless, Amy agreed to go. For Amy, the actual experience was similar. The music was a little too loud, the room was a little too dark, and she was just another face in the crowd. She had come to realize that Eric was typical of the relationships she had found in these places, and that she didn't want or need such a shallow connection. When she was generally overlooked, it made no difference to her. Jada, on the other hand, was devastated by the lack of attention. Amy thought that Jada had accepted the fact that she was no longer the prettiest girl in the room. When they were almost shunned, and Jada was even ignored on the dance floor, it didn't take long before Jada suggested, with tears in her eyes, that they leave. That night was the final break with their previous lifestyle. Afterwards, it took Jada about a week to recover emotionally, then she pressed on with her new goals. Jada never mentioned the clubs again, and Amy had been surprised by her own apathy for them.

This clean break from their former lifestyle had affected their other friendships. After the accident, Char had kept in touch, and she had often stopped by for a movie evening with a meal during the first few weeks after the accident. She would regale Amy and Jada with tales from her nightlife, seemingly unaware that she was rubbing salt in Jada's wounds. As time went on, however, her visits, calls and texts became less frequent. When Char hadn't visited for a couple of weeks, Amy called her. Never one to mince words, Char told her that she and Jada were like a "couple of nuns" and no fun at all. "I can be bored by myself," said Char, hurtfully ending a friendship that seemed like it would last forever. Amy realized that she and Jada had changed, not Charlotte. Besides, Char had always been one to say exactly what she thought. Amy was sure that Char hadn't meant to hurt her feelings. After all, from her perspective, Amy and Jada were the ones who had changed. Amy was saddened that the three of them had drifted apart, but hoped that they would mend the rift between them in the future. Jada was so busy with her new life that she seemed to hardly notice Char's absence.

Dawn, on the other hand, had come again to play a larger role in both their lives after the crash. Her strength and support during the emotional crisis of the accident prefigured the peace and encouragement that she brought to Jada during the difficult time when she was trying to accept all that had happened. In retrospect, Amy realized that she had taken a path that led away from Dawn with Char and Jada, but the accident its aftermath had brought her closer and closer to where Dawn had always been. Living with Jada had led Amy to evaluate and change her life. Often she had grown through introspection or increased awareness of the world around her. But she had experienced a spiritual re-awakening, as well. It had begun with frantic prayers on the way to the ER, as Amy tried to get God to do what she wanted. But it had become much more than that. Amy's newfound gratitude for the blessings in her life had finally been directed towards her creator, and this had led her back to the only faith she had ever known, the Catholicism of her youth. Dawn was as available as she had always been in matters of faith, answering Amy's questions and keeping her company, but letting Amy set the pace. Although Jada persisted in her agnosticism, Dawn was able to help her through some of her darkest days with timely, relevant encouragement and seemingly endless empathy. Amy realized that she had gradually come around to a lifestyle very similar to how Dawn had always lived. Now that she was enjoying some tranquility and real community, Amy could understand the contentment Dawn had always felt with her life. How ironic that she, Jada, and Char had once pitied Dawn.

The unintended consequences of helping a friend in need had gradually transformed Amy's life. She no longer had anything to hide. Ever since high school, she had unconsciously kept track of what she could tell to whom. Some people she would tell about her partying, some not. With others, she would talk about her opinions on different subjects. Different members of her family would be told of different aspects of her life. At the time, she didn't realize how much mental energy this was taking. Now that she wasn't ashamed of any of her behavior, she was able to talk about anything with any of her friends or family members. Not only did this make her more relaxed in her relationships, she listened more thoroughly during conversations, really hearing more of what others were saying. No longer was she constantly thinking about her reply as the other conversant was speaking. As she opened up and paid attention, she found that others reciprocated. Especially with her family in Florida, she was pleasantly surprised to get to know each of them more fully as they responded to her new openness.

In the past, Amy had a vision of what she had to purchase in order to maintain an "acceptable" lifestyle. She would then purchase whatever fit that mental image, regardless of its cost. This caused two problems for her. First, she constantly was carrying a burden of debt. Early in her career, she was making enough money that she could pay it off, if she had so desired. After the economic downturn, her income had decreased, and her debt had become a constant in her life. Her job search and subsequent new career were overshadowed by Amy's efforts to get back to her previous income level, so that she could pay off her debt and recover the lifestyle that she thought she wanted. Even at her current job, she had spent far too much time trying to get enough of a raise to get back to her previous level of carefree spending. Since Jada had moved in, for the first time in her life she had altered her lifestyle several times to adjust to her income. When her income and expenses were balanced, it eliminated a major source of worry, and Amy found that it was not that hard to be unfashionable if it meant she didn't have to worry about money all the time. When Jada's settlement arrived, Amy was able to reduce her debt and even save some money as Jada started helping with the household expenses. All of these changes even made her job more enjoyable, since she was able to live comfortably on her current income, instead of spending the next raise before it even arrived.

Gradually, she had also changed in her approach to her work. In retrospect, she had been a cold but efficient HR person. She laughed ruefully at herself as she recognized how uncaring she had been when, in the course of her job, she had learned about the struggles that her co-workers were facing. After Jada's accident, however, she found herself gradually more interested in listening and helping, both personally and professionally. She was pleasantly surprised to find that these small connections helped to eliminate the isolation that had bothered her. Between these new links at work, and her closer ties with family and friends, she didn't feel alone any more.

Looking back over the last few months, she realized that her changes in lifestyle had changed her circle of friends at work. When she had started working at the lab, only she and Jan had been close. The two women would talk about their adventures in Seattle's nightlife. If she weren't so much younger, in fact, Amy would have invited Jan to join her, Char, and Jada on their weekend escapades. However, Amy was disappointed to find that there was nothing else to their relationship. Once she didn't have "war stories" to share with Jan, they really didn't have anything to talk about. She found her relationship with Jan much more professional and less personal. On the other hand, she had become more interested in Chuck's tales of the ups and downs of family life. Amy was able to better appreciate the value that he placed on his wife and kids and their struggles and achievements. After all, over the last few months, she and Jada had become a type of "family", and she could now better understand the pride and satisfaction Chuck felt in the growth and experiences of his wife and children. This new appreciation of family life had also led her to get back in touch with her brother Pete and his wife Nancy, and to enjoy videoconferencing with them and their two year old son, Wyatt, in Florida. Even though the events of their lives were still quite different than hers, she enjoyed becoming adult friends as well as sibling.

Of all the people that she knew, her assessment of Ed, the understructure department manager, had changed the most. Upon meeting Idham Maarif (Ed's real name), Amy had known that Chuck felt that he was a very valuable employee, but he seemed odd to Amy. He was slightly older than her, dressed in ugly, unfashionable clothing, and was polite but intense. Amy felt that he was cold toward her, and that he went out of his way to avoid her. Furthermore, he seemed like he was always taking smoke breaks, and Amy found smoking so "tacky." She never felt uncomfortable around him; like she did with some of her male colleagues, but neither did she ever feel the desire to get to know him more. They left each other alone, and she had attributed her dislike of him to his "Middle-Eastern" origins.

Since the accident, however, her assessment of Ed had changed. As she had become more observant of the people around her, she realized that the staff in Ed's department really looked up to him. She noticed that he rarely complained, but picked up the loose ends when others were out sick or on vacation, and that he could be counted on to complete even difficult work with excellence. When Amy had started at the lab, she couldn't really evaluate her co-workers' technical skill. As time had gone on, she had gradually learned more about how dental devices were made, and she could now see that Ed was very skilled and diligent in his work. When she noticed he never smelled of smoke, she asked some colleagues and found out that he was praying during his breaks, as required by his Islamic faith. After she had to break with fashion herself due to her tight budget, Ed's seeming lack of fashion sense became more an interesting quirk than a character flaw. As she distanced herself from the "meat market" mentality of the nightclub scene, she realized two things about Ed. First, that she had subconsciously resented him for failing to find her attractive. Second, that she no longer wanted to be thought of as "hot", so she had come to appreciate men like Ed who didn't stare at her body. In short, Amy had reached the point at which she could see what a good man Ed was, but he still seemed to have no use for her. She was curious about this, but their strained relationship would never permit broaching the subject.

ED

Every time that Amy Buchanan woman walked by his work area, her shoes with that ubiquitous boomerang-shaped logo were like nails on a chalkboard to him. She seemed so brash, immodest, unkind, and selfish that the less time he spent around her, the happier he was. To him, she epitomized everything that could be vulgar about America and its citizens. When he was young, he heard from afar about the wealth available to all in the United States and wanted to experience this material plenty and life of ease for himself. Now that he had lived here for many years, he had found that the stories of his youth had been somewhat misleading. While he did have a comfortable life in America, he constantly faced the danger of losing his soul and becoming like that woman.

Idham had been born in the poverty-stricken area surrounding Jakarta, Indonesia. As a child, he had attended the local Islamic school through what Americans consider ninth grade, and he had learned English as part of the regular curriculum. Both his parents had worked very hard in a locally-owned factory that supplied multinational corporations with textile products, but their earnings from a seventy hour work week could barely provide food, clothing, and shelter for him and his siblings. Both his parents were kind when they were home, but he could see how tired they were. There were several times when his mom came home from work with her clothing ripped or a bruise on her face. Ed had known that she was upset, and she and his dad would find a quieter corner in their hovel and whisper to each other throughout the evening. Sometimes, she would resolve to quit before bed, but the next morning she and his father would trudge back to the shoe factory, which provided the only jobs in the area. Often, they had to ignore sickness, fatigue, and their clamorous children, knowing that they would be replaced by one of their hundreds of unemployed neighbors if they did not show up for work that day. They lived in fear of on-the-job injury or serious illness, since they had seen their colleagues dismissed after being disabled by the dangerous machinery at work. Also, they had to avoid those who tried to improve the worker's lot through organizing, because suspicion of joining a union would lead to instant dismissal, physical abuse, or worse. As the oldest child, Ed mostly resented them for their long absences, during which he had to care for his siblings. He knew that they worked hard, but didn't really have a visceral understanding of what that really meant. Once he got old enough to work himself, however, he learned how difficult their jobs had been, and could finally appreciate their struggle and sacrifice on behalf of their children. The greatest sorrow of his formative years was the death of one of his younger brothers from typhus, caused by drinking the polluted water in their neighborhood. It was very hard to reconcile the mercy of Allah that was taught in school with the daily hardships against which his family struggled. Idham decided that he was going to make a better life for himself and his own children. He did not want to raise his family in a rickety shack built from scraps of junk, with little food and rags for clothes. Of the limited opportunities available to him, public education seemed to offer the best chance for achieving this better life. Despite the pressing demands of caring for his siblings, he found the time necessary to attend school and complete his homework, so that he could excel in school.

Idham's native ability and fierce determination enabled him to finish his formal schooling at the top of his class. Upon graduation, however, he had to join his parents at the local shoe factory, to help support the family. After he started working in the noisy, dangerous, dark, and smelly factory, he came to appreciate more than ever what his parents had endured to support him and his siblings. He was rarely abused, due to his high levels of productivity and accuracy, but he was angered when he saw his fellow workers beaten, harassed, and even raped at work. A devout Muslim himself, he found it outrageous that the managers at the factory engaged in lewd behavior and even sometimes drank alcohol on the job. As he advanced in the company due to his hard work, he realized that he and his fellows had also been deprived of the minimum wage and overtime pay that were required by Indonesian law.

Idham knew that someone was getting very wealthy from the sale of the thousands of shoes that he and his co-workers produced. At the time, he thought that the factory owners were the ones getting rich from his labor, and he hated them. Eventually, his exceptional skill and diligence was noticed, and he was promoted to management. He had excelled at English in school, and was chosen to interact with the English-speaking brokers who purchased the shoes he and his co-workers suffered to make. All the while, he continued to live at home, giving his entire salary to his father to help meet the family expenses. Idham wanted to get married, but knew he could not afford a family as long as his parents needed his help. He threw himself into the role of chief breadwinner, and time went by.

Gradually, his other brothers and sisters completed their schooling, and they began to do their part to support the family. During that time, Idham's hard work, integrity, and excellent English had brought him to the attention of the American company that was the only customer of the factory in which he worked. They offered him a job in the United States, in which he would coordinate production in Indonesia with the demands of American retailers. He would earn a much higher wage, and he could have a large part of his income automatically sent to his family. He would be transferred to the United States, and become the sole bhasa-Indonesian speaker at the American warehouse. Suddenly, the opportunity for a better life had come. In his heart, he was nervous about leaving everything that he knew behind, but he knew he had to overcome those fears to build a new future for himself.

His experience of crossing the Pacific on an old cargo ship was not one he would like to relive. He had never even seen the ocean up to that point in his life, and its vastness was awe-inspiring. On a calm day, there was a certain serenity on the ocean. During the frequent squalls they faced, however, it seemed that the very planet beneath him had come unhinged as he was tossed around the ship. When the storms came at night, the ship became a living nightmare for him. After twenty-two days at sea, he reached dry land in Washington State. Then and there he vowed never to travel by ship again, and thanked Allah that he had been preserved from a watery death.

The company provided him with a furnished studio apartment that, while small and plain by American standards, was the largest and nicest home that Idham had ever seen. Also, this was the first time in his life he had lived by himself. The job seemed easy to him, since he could only work eight hours a day due to American labor laws. Since he didn't know anyone, this left him with lots of lonely hours to fill.

Every payday, Idham was elated to see how much money his family was getting from his wages. Finally, obtaining the necessities of physical life for himself and his family had become relatively easy. He certainly did not live an extravagant lifestyle, but even a fraction of his income allowed him the best lifestyle that he had ever experienced. However, he had never before experienced such a struggle to practice his faith. At home, everyone had celebrated Ramadan together, prayed together five times per day, and his Zakat, or charitable giving, had been administered by local clerics. Here, he had to find time to pray by himself at work, the nearest Mosque was far away, and the constant bombardment by scandalous dress, alcohol, drugs, and licentiousness, as well as the religious bigotry directed at him, stoked the anger and resentment against which he had struggled his whole life. Suddenly, the clerics who proclaimed America the "Great Satan" did not seem so wrong. Until he left for the United States, he had spent all his energy keeping his family alive physically. He had told himself that his life would be perfect if only he could truly provide for them. Now that he had met that goal, he found that the struggle to preserve his soul in this hostile environment had merely replaced one serious challenge with another.

Not that Ed, as Idham had taken to calling himself, was a stranger to religious tolerance. Although he had grown up in a predominantly Muslim nation, the core Indonesian ideology of Pancasilia had taught him, and most of his countrymen, that the small percentage of Indonesians who had always followed other religions were entitled to practice their own faith, as long as they did not greatly offend their Muslim neighbors. Sure, there were extremists in Indonesia, just as there are everywhere, but the tolerance of the average Indonesian put to shame his American co-workers, who sometimes call him a "stupid, damn rag head," or worse, especially in the wake of the extremist attacks on Sept 11, 2001. Since his arrival in America, he had found a few people who truly practiced their various faiths. Although he might not agree with these faithful few on specific religious tenets, at least he admired their integrity and character. With these exceptions, however, it seemed that the dominant American religion was hedonism, in which people of nominal or no belief ruthlessly sought to advance in their careers so that they could provide themselves with every material pleasure available to them. Indonesian society had helped him to foster his devotion to Allah, in ways he had never appreciated, until arriving in the United States. Now, he felt his very soul bombarded by the "anything goes" ideology that seemed to permeate American life.

He did make some acquaintances in his mosque, and gradually he got used to this constant battle for self-preservation. Over time, he came to see that life in America would be a constant jihad, not a physical war against political enemies, but an internal struggle against the pervasive amorality that tried to seduce him.

Ed performed as always, working hard with integrity, and his position with the company seemed secure. But after a few years, justified media outcry against the conditions in Indonesian factories caused his employers to abandon Indonesia for countries with even less regulation and media presence, instead of correcting the miserable conditions of their workers. When this happened, Idham was laid off, as his language skills were no longer needed. Since he was in the country on only a work permit, and he had no apartment, car, or furniture of his own, finding a job became paramount.

Somehow, he had come across the advertisement for a model room trainee at Seattle Crowns and Dentures, a Seattle dental laboratory. Chuck, the owner, had seen his determination and, perhaps, desperation, and offered him the job. For the first few weeks, Ed had lived in a weekly rental motel on Aurora Avenue as he had saved enough money to get the things that he needed. As in all his other jobs, his intelligence and drive, along with a work ethic almost unknown among his co-workers, had allowed him to master his job, while learning more and more tasks on his own time. The dexterity that he had gained manufacturing shoes enable Ed to quickly learn the skills necessary to hand make precision replacement teeth in a dental laboratory. As positions opened up through attrition and growth, Chuck promoted Ed, knowing that this young man would produce work at the highest level of quality and quantity. Chuck seemed to enjoy doing the ceramic work on the outside of the crowns, but he treated Ed as his partner, eventually leaving him to supervise both the understructure and denture departments, about ten people. Ed's staff found him a good if somewhat demanding leader, but appreciated his technical knowledge, ability, and work ethic.

Working at Seattle Crowns and Dentures, Ed met Americans with varied backgrounds, and began to see that the "American" lifestyle that he saw in the mass media was not the only way people actually lived. Many people, like him, tried to live a decent life of integrity. After all, he could live as a faithful Muslim in this nominally Christian culture if he so desired. In Indonesia, practicing Islam was just a matter of doing what everyone else was doing. Certainly, there were varying levels of devotion, but the average person was trying to be a good Muslim. Here, he found that people of any faith could be as devout as they wanted, but they had to have a good understanding of their faith, and a strong desire to practice it, because the culture around them was not going in the same direction. As he came to see the strengths and weaknesses of the American experiment, and found a place for himself within the society, the anger that had propelled him for so long started to dissipate. Over time, he applied for his green card and found a way to get funds from his new job to his family, but he couldn't bring himself to become a citizen. His parents wrote to him from time to time, but family support had gradually become nothing more than a monthly bill like the utilities, as he became more and more distant from their daily lives.

Chuck somehow realized that Ed would never complain about his salary. While he didn't know the constant fear of Ed's early career, he surmised that this was a difference in cultures and, as the quality of Ed's work, and that of his team, brought in new customers, and kept the existing dentists happy, he shared the profits of the business with Ed in the form of greater salary. Ed never seemed to change his rather austere lifestyle, so Chuck had no idea if his largesse was actually benefitting Ed, but it was gratifying that Ed was always thankful for any increases that he would get. Truthfully, taking a chance on that inexperienced young man was the best thing that Chuck had ever done, and he kept that in mind as he and Ed screened prospective employees.

From Chuck's perspective, the only problem with Ed was his inability to get along with Amy. While Amy lacked Ed's fire and dedication, her unique experience and education made her the other key member of his leadership team. Between Amy's disdain for Ed, and Ed's hostility to Amy, Chuck found his time divided almost equally between managing his porcelain team and acting as peacemaker between his two key leaders. He didn't see any way that he could resolve their differences, but he hoped sincerely that someday they would find a way to get along.

Coming to America had helped Ed in many ways, but challenged him in others. For the first time in his life, he had all his meager material needs met, he could save some money, and he could support his parents. He lived in a society in which he was technically free to practice his faith, but which had such a strong undercurrent resisting any religious exercise that seriously practicing his faith was an ongoing struggle. He had finally achieved a position in which he was respected and treated well, but not really understood. In short, he had all the things that he thought he wanted as a young man, but he had now realized that there were other, even more important, things for which he longed. As a younger man in Indonesia, he had wanted to get married, but knew that he could not afford his own family while supporting his parents and siblings. Now, he could afford to start a family, and he wanted to find a wife with whom to share life and love, but the walls that he built around himself to protect him from the spiritual dangers of American culture also kept everyone around him at a polite arm's length. Loneliness had been an unwelcome visitor that he had first encountered in the United States. Now that he could finally meet the physical needs of his family, and his life had become relatively stable, loneliness was the key difficulty in his life. Sure, he had a few friends in the mosque, but he had not met anyone with whom he could share his soul.

He had never been ready to take on the responsibilities of marriage and family before. Sure, he had what Americans call "crushes" on girls from his neighborhood back home in Jakarta, but the heavy burden of supporting his family had always come first. Now, in this alien land, he had seen many attractive women, but he had enough discussions with them to know that their thoughts and goals were as foreign to him as his were to them. Furthermore, not being socialized to American dating rituals, he wasn't even sure how to go about meeting a wife here. He didn't want to bring a woman from Jakarta and put her through all the struggles that he had faced, and he had become Americanized enough that an arranged marriage seemed odious to him. The only single woman in his life was the accountant at work, Amy Buchanan. His management duties regularly brought them into contact, and Ed had noticed how attractive she was, but her immodesty and selfishness made her odious to him. She seemed to only have clothes with the accursed boomerang-shaped symbol. Every time Ed saw it, he realized that SHE was the one getting rich from the suffering of all the people that he had grown up with, spending a small fraction of her paycheck to purchase something that his parents, siblings, friends, and countrymen had risked life and limb to make. They worked as hard as they could for pennies so that she could wear stylish sneakers to which she hardly gave a second thought. Because of his own experiences with the garment industry, Ed did not buy brand name clothing at all. He assumed that the company for which he had worked was not unique in its ill treatment of its workers. Instead, he had made it his hobby to find local people who sold clothing that they themselves had made. Ed thought that he probably spent more on his wardrobe than anyone at the lab, and was probably the least stylish. But, he thought, I want to be fairly paid for my work. I enjoy a good life from my labors, and I want the people who make my clothes to enjoy a similar fair lifestyle.

Since Amy had arrived at the lab, his staff had complained about her. While she did what was absolutely necessary to address their human resource problems, her cold demeanor and lack of compassion had earned her the whispered title of "Ice Princess". But over the last few months, Ed was surprised to find that his technical staff had fewer, then no, complaints after working with Ms. Buchanan. Previously, Ed had shored up his distaste for her when his understructure teammates would go to her for help with their personnel issues, and return complaining of impersonal, minimal help, grudgingly delivered. But as this tide of complaints fell off, and one of the newer technicians commented on the personnel director's helpfulness, Ed began to wonder if she had truly, and unexpectedly, changed. His interactions with her remained coolly professional, but it seemed as if her part of their mutual disdain had lessened. Ed knew that Chuck wished that the two of them could get along well enough so he could retire from his role of referee. So he decided to see if she had changed enough so that they could end their feud.

Ed decided that most of his dislike was now just a habit, but he had such a visceral reaction to the shoe brand that she routinely wore. Taking a step that was rare for him, Ed decided to give her the benefit of the doubt and talk to her about the origins of her clothing. The next time that they were by themselves in a conversational setting, he would start the discussion and see what happened. A couple of weeks later, they were eating lunch in the break room with no one else around. This rare occurrence seemed propitious indeed, given his earlier resolution, so he decided to dive in.

"Hello Ms. Buchanan, how are you today?" Ed had learned formal English, and had chosen not to adopt American slang as much as possible.

"Fine, Ed. How are you?" Amy replied automatically. It seemed as if she had no interest in continuing the conversation, but she wasn't really hostile, either. Based upon their previous relationship, this was as good an interaction as he could expect. "Well," he thought to himself, "here I go."

"If you don't mind, I would like to talk to you about something that has troubled me for some time."

That got her attention. She turned towards him and looked him in the eye, nervous but not cowed. "Sure, let's get into it."

"I am curious about your shoes. Do you have any idea how they are made, or where they come from?"

"Not really. I like the style, find them comfortable, and got them on a good sale. I don't really give much thought to my wardrobe's construction." She was clearly trying to politely discuss a topic in which she had no interest.

"Well, the reason I ask is that I have extensive knowledge about the origins of your shoes. Both my parents and I have worked in the factory that makes them, and I came to the United States originally to work in inventory control for the company that distributes those shoes."

This piqued her interest. Suddenly his interest in her footwear seemed like more than just another of his personal oddities, and her inquisitive nature led her deeper into the conversation. "As I said, I have never really looked into the manufacture of my clothing, but I would like to know about it."

Ed realized that she would not have asked that question if she knew what he would say. He reminded himself that she had probably always done white collar work in a country with extensive labor laws, and probably had no idea how hard life is for laborers in her own country, let alone across the globe.

"At the time, I knew that the work was hard, and that it took my parents from our family essentially six days a week. I knew that several of my acquaintances lost their jobs after becoming disabled at work, or to punitive firings because of suspected union activity, and many left our village to search for something better somewhere else. Now I realize that the people who made your shoes toil in misery beyond your comprehension. For instance, as a female employee, you could be raped or beaten on the job and expected to keep your mouth shut and keep working, or be fired and blacklisted. If you were injured due to defective equipment, you would be turned away with no assistance from government or employer, at the mercy of the alms of your fellow Indonesians, your family, or the streets. You would be routinely required to work overtime at your employer's convenience with no pay. Despite your best efforts, you could lose your job with no severance pay at any time if the company relocates to another country even less protective of its citizens. You would work for twelve or more hours per day in a windowless, loud, dirty factory with poor lighting and ventilation. All this, and a husband and wife can barely earn enough money for a little food, some rags for their family to wear, and a shack for shelter. The people who made your shoes probably risked their lives, health, and sanity for a year to earn what you make in a day. And these people are not just statistics to me. They are my parents, my siblings, my extended family and friends from my neighborhood. Every time I see you wearing those shoes, I am reminded of all these things and I shudder inside. I hoped that you did not know any of this, but sometimes wonder how you couldn't. After all, it is your loyal patronage that keeps these sweatshops open."

This was the longest conversation that the two of them had ever had. Clearly, Amy was taken aback by the ugly truth of his words. This conversation clashed with her view of herself as a nice person who cared for others, like Jada.

"Well," she said, when she had collected herself, "at least my purchases keep these people in some kind of job. Better to work than to starve." As she voiced this rationalization, she realized how weak it was. She really was speaking more from mental habit than actual engagement and thought. But she had said what she had said, and it was up to Ed to respond.

Ed felt angry because all the people he really cared about, and their misery, had been reduced to "those people" by this woman and many like-minded Americans. However, he made what would become a pivotal decision, and decided to put the insult aside and carry on the conversation. "While it is good that my family and friends earn something, how much better would it be if you insisted that the people who make the commodities that give you sustenance, protection, and comfort received at least some of the benefits that you want from your own job? If American consumers insisted upon humane working conditions and fair wages anywhere their products are made, it would happen instantaneously. You could change the world for the better tomorrow if you cared, and instead you make it worse by your inattention. The people who made those shoes appreciate you because they have a job, but they dislike you because the job is so hard and unfair. And if they knew what I know about how you really live, and how the cheap products that they provide allow a working person such as yourself to live in luxury unimaginable to them, they would truly hate you. I am not engaging in hyperbole, the ease and comfort of your life is built on the foundation of their misery. In reality, if not technically, they are your slaves, building you a beautiful, easy life while sacrificing their families, their health, and even their very lives. Conveniently, they are so far away and so hidden that you do not even have to trouble yourself to see the misery that you are perpetuating."

Ed surprised himself. He was usually one to keep his anger in check, stay on the surface in his relationships, not delving into deep subjects or confrontation. For some reason, he had instead told this thoughtless, fashionable young woman what he really thought. He waited for her response.

Amy had spoken once from habit, but she wasn't going to do so again. Although Ed's words were cutting, she could see that he was telling the truth. The realization that her unthinking deeds had such serious consequences for her fellow human beings was difficult to absorb. Excuses sprang to her mind, but she saw them for what they were, and ignored them. Perhaps the months with Jada had given her the strength and introspection necessary to take the next step. "Ed," she said, "I don't know what to say. I'm sorry that my actions have hurt you and your family and friends. I suppose I could have known, but didn't make the effort, and turned away from the glimpses that I did see. How can I start to make things right?"

Now Ed was surprised. He had always thought that Amy was aware of the results of her purchasing decisions, and just didn't care. Now, he could tell that she was sincere, both in her ignorance and her desire to change. He realized that his knowledge of the truth had made him responsible to speak up, and he had previously shirked that responsibility in his desire to get along in America, just as she had previously avoided the unpleasant knowledge he had just given her. "Amy, I assume that you have noticed that I am not the most fashionably dressed person at the lab. You always look put together, so I assume that you think I have no fashion sense. While this may be true, I never, to the best of my knowledge, purchase any item from more than one intermediary. When I buy a product from someone who did not actually produce it, I make sure that the person who did make it is fairly compensated and justly treated. My food, clothing, and furniture is mostly purchased from the people who made it. Thus, it is much more expensive than the products offered at big box stores, and uses up more of my income. Furthermore, the designs are generally outside the main stream, and may make me seem unfashionable. Shopping this way also takes much more time. At the end of the day, however, I can rest well, knowing that the money I earn at a good job is being used to provide good jobs for others. I feel that the scales of justice in this area of my life are balanced. I know that my parents would be proud of the decisions that I am making, and this makes me glad. In all honesty, I thought that you and your countrymen were aware of these injustices but just didn't care, and I've never before spoken to anyone about this. I now know that I have a responsibility to speak up on behalf of my friends and family, and will do so in the future."

Ed had surprised himself. Usually a man of few words, this conversation was one of the longest that he had had in years. It had been so long since he had really said what he thought; he had forgotten how good it felt, especially when reciprocated.

Amy wasn't sure what to say. She was certain that she would need to change, based upon this conversation, but really wasn't sure how. Her life had reached a new stasis now that Jada was in school and the changes in her life away from work had become routine. Maybe, this would be a good time to take on a new challenge. If Ed really felt that this was so important, perhaps he would put his money where his mouth was, and show her how to live this way. "I believe what you say, and want to change. But I don't know where to begin. What should I do?"

"If you would like, we could go grocery shopping together this weekend. I could show you some of the things that I have learned."

"That would be fine. When and where should we meet?"

"If you have a car and are willing to drive, perhaps you could pick me up here Sunday afternoon. I normally take the bus, but that would save time, and I would be happy to help pay for fuel. You may want to bring cash for your purchases, as we will be buying products from individuals, not large companies with credit card processing systems."

Amy agreed to those terms, and they finished their lunches and went their separate ways. For the rest of the week, each of them struggled between their previous antipathy and their newfound detente. Chuck saw their decreased enmity, couldn't quickly uncover the reason, and decided to enjoy the break from being their referee. At the end of the week, they confirmed their plan and left for the weekend.

Jada was surprised when Amy insisted on going grocery shopping by herself. Since going to the store together had been the beginning of her rebirth, the two of them had made that shopping trip a weekly ritual. But school was keeping her so busy that Jada welcomed the extra time, so she gave Amy her share of the grocery money and didn't press her friend too hard to explain the change. Amy was glad that Jada hadn't asked too many questions, because she didn't feel ready yet to explain what she was doing. However, living in a comfortable condo full of items manufactured under unknown circumstances and bought without any thought made her more sure than ever that she needed to change. "It's funny," she thought to herself, "how things can change so quickly. A week ago, I would've gone out of my way to avoid Ed, at work or otherwise. Now I'm looking forward to spending a Sunday afternoon with him."

Out of habit, she dressed in a cute, outdoorsy outfit, but consciously wore clothing without obvious brand symbols on them. She got in the car and drove over to the Medical-Dental building, where Ed was waiting outside the parking garage. They exchanged the stiff pleasantries of people who don't know each other well, and then Ed directed her to the local famer's market. At first, Amy found it uncomfortable, with one or two kinds of items piled in stands watched closely by the proprietors. She was used to having everything that she could want in one place, and being left alone by the disinterested grocery store employees. Gradually, with Ed's help, she began to enjoy selecting her food from the folks who actually grow it. Ed knew most of the vendors, and he inquired about their families and their businesses. At work, people seemed to think well of Ed, but he had no real friends. Here, he was like a celebrity. It was clear that Ed had been coming to the market for a long time, and had developed a relationship with some of the families there. He clearly chose his purchases based upon who was selling the item, rather than what necessarily appealed to him. Amy was able to see Ed using his spending to help his fellow human being, and realized that his way of life that created a sense of community. When they finished shopping, Amy herself left with a feeling of accomplishment, proud that she had done something good and completed her grocery shopping at the same time. While she wasn't quite ready to talk to Jada about the whole thing, yet, she felt good about making this change, and was eager to get Ed's advice on what to do next.

One thing Amy had noticed was the limited assortment of items available. Not one to jump in by halves, Amy wanted to know about paper towels, cleaning supplies, personal hygiene, and the myriad of other items that she purchased.

"Ed, I feel good about the food we bought today. But what about other things that I need. How do I justly purchase those items as well?"

"Amy, as I said, this lifestyle has become a hobby of mine, and I am glad to share the results of my research with you. As you learn more about the goods and services you use, you will become more adept at research and asking questions in person so that you can feel good about all the choices that you make. Furthermore, if you have a choice of businesses to patronize, look for the one in which you would most like to work, not only the one with the lowest price. The intention to do the right thing is the most important. That will guide you in the right path."

"Thanks, Ed. I'm glad you challenged me in my thoughtless lifestyle. Thanks for helping me to change. Honestly, I never understood or liked you before, because I hadn't taken the time to get to know you. I've already come to appreciate you more."

"Amy, I have to confess that I have treated you more as a stereotype than a person, and that I didn't like you much, either. Getting to know you a little, I've found that you have a good heart. I think that we could become friends."

Amy offered to drive Ed home, and he accepted. On the way, they talked about events at work and the farmer's market. They both seemed to have enjoyed their time together.

Given what she knew about Ed's salary, since she wrote the paychecks, she was surprised at first to find that he lived in the basement of a small house on Beacon Hill. She suspected there might be a story to this, as well. But she didn't need a lecture on saving the planet through frugal housing, so she dropped him off without asking about his living arrangements. Ed offered a polite "goodbye" and a wave, and she was off. This seemed like a date, and most dates ended with more physical contact than that. She suddenly realized that one of the things that she resented about Ed was his seeming physical disinterest in her. Most of the guys with whom she had worked had taken appreciative glances at her from time to time. Although it sometimes made her uncomfortable, most of the time she appreciated the leverage her appearance gave her at work, and she was not above using it. Obviously, this relationship would be different.

When Amy got back to her place, Jada came down to the garage and helped her bring in the groceries. She accepted the explanation that Amy had decided to try out the local farmer's market with a friend from work. Since Amy had never said anything good about Ed, Jada assumed that the friend must be Jan. Amy let that assumption stand through her silence, since she wasn't yet ready to talk about Ed. Although they were still close and more comfortable together than ever, Jada was ever more wrapped up in law school and preparing for her new career. They were sharing the condo companionably, but were slowly drifting apart in their personalities and interests. Amy was just glad that Jada had jumped back into life with such gusto. Seeing her friend truly LIVING her life was all the reward Amy now needed for the help that she had given.

The nice thing about her new shopping plan was that Amy felt good about herself at each meal. Previously, she had only thought about how the food tasted, how little it cost, or how much running she would have to do to work it off. Never had she thought about the people who grew and prepared it for her. Now, she said a little prayer of thanksgiving and blessing for those people at each meal. The farmer's market didn't have any frozen dinners, so Amy had to spend more time preparing meals. Jada enjoyed the food, as long as Amy did most of the cooking, and didn't object to Amy's new shopping plan. They still ran together lots of days, so the time spent shopping together didn't seem as important anymore.

Over time, Amy came to look forward to the time that she and Ed spent together, surprising herself. Gradually, Ed was becoming her best friend. Their differences in religion and upbringing, as well as their shared interest in justice and in caring for others, gave them a lot to talk about. Furthermore, they could share the humor and struggles of work together. Amy was surprised to find that Idham entirely supported his parents with his pay, and he, for his part, was surprised to meet Jada and hear from her how Amy had "saved her life." Amy found out, as expected, that the house in which Idham rented a room belonged to someone from his mosque that had fallen on hard times and was having trouble paying the mortgage. Idham only had a small part of the house, but paid the majority of the housing costs.

Amy discovered that his "smoke breaks" were actually time spent in prayer, and was learning to appreciate his devotion to God. Finding time on the weekends to spend together sometimes was a challenge, as both days were church days for one of them. Each enjoyed learning about the other's faith, but neither felt or applied pressure to make the other one change. In some ways, each added to the other. Amy was encouraged to be more faithful in prayer and thoughtful towards others. Ed found himself conceptualizing Allah as more merciful, and he found that mercy working itself out in his interaction with others who had previously annoyed him.

Despite their growing friendship and intimacy, Ed never went beyond a kiss goodnight with Amy. They enjoyed holding hands when walking, or a hug of greeting outside of work, but Ed gave no indication that he wanted or expected more physical intimacy from their relationship. Amy hadn't been this chaste in a dating relationship in a long time, but she hadn't dated since Jada's accident, either. Most of the time, she enjoyed the lack of intrusion from the physical. But, as their friendship deepened, she found herself more and more attracted to Ed, and worried sometimes that he didn't feel the same.

One night, after they had spent the day on Bainbridge Island walking around, and were returning to Seattle by ferry, Amy turned to Ed and asked, "What do you think about me?"

Standing on the forward deck of the ship, and looking at the lights of Seattle arranged in front of them like a giant layered cake, Ed paused for a moment. He knew that this was an important question, and he wanted to give a correct, and considered, response. "You're my good friend. When we first met, I thought that you were selfish and thoughtless. Now I know that you're a caring woman who is constantly striving to become the best person that you can be."

"That's fine. But what do you think about me as a woman?"

"I try not to. When I do, you take my breath away. You are beautiful within and without, and I feel lucky to be your friend. What we have is more than I could ever have expected, and I treasure the time that we spend together."

"Don't you want me? Sometimes, I lie awake at night and wish you were holding me in your arms. I never feel that passion and urgency from you. I'm afraid that I love you more than you love me."

"Dear Amy, I love you more than I have loved anyone before. I dream of you, but have determined to be chaste until marriage. Like you, I sometimes struggle to control my passions. Rest assured that I love you, enjoy your company, and hope that we will continue to develop our relationship. "

Amy had learned enough about Idham to appreciate and trust his frankness, and this reassured her immensely. She decided to relax in the relationship, and let it go where it would. Sometimes, they had to struggle to remain purely professional at work, yet, despite their efforts, it was certainly an open secret that they were dating. Chuck loved the new arrangement. It baffled him that the two greatest foes at the lab had somehow become the closest of friends, but he didn't seek to dig into the situation too deeply. He was glad that he could finally end his referee job and focus on his passion, the porcelain department. With Amy and Idham taking care of things, he was as happy as he had ever been as a lab owner. It had taken some time, but enduring their spats and bickering had turned out to be well worth it. Around Thanksgiving, Idham came to him with an unusual request. Chuck knew that it would be hard for him personally, but he knew that Idham deserved his help, so he agreed. "I wonder if Amy knows what's going on?" He couldn't see how Ed could keep something like this a secret, but you never knew. He chuckled to himself. What if he did keep it a secret? She would certainly be surprised.

Amy was glad that Ed fit so well with her family and friends. Whatever it was that had driven her off at first, it seemed not to affect anyone else. When Amy introduced him to Dawn and Jada, they both seemed to approve of him, and Wyatt and her parents seemed to enjoy talking with him over the phone on occasion. Perhaps Ed had learned from Amy not to judge a book by its cover, and this newfound emphasis on mercy had smoothed the rough parts of his personality. They talked about their interest in compassionate consumerism when appropriate in conversation, but certainly did not try to change people's minds. They knew that their friends and family would come to understand in their own time. Amy's friends could see how her love for Ed filled her with joy. Most of them honestly liked Ed. But if they didn't, they could appreciate him for all the good he brought to Amy.

Life was not without its little frustrations, but lately things had gone so smoothly for Amy that the Christmas problem was frustrating her. She and Idham had made plans to spend part of the day together, but her family made it sound like her annual trip before the New Year holiday would be too much of a burden, and Jada and Dawn were so wrapped up in their own activities, that Amy found herself in a bit of a funk. Christmas was on a Friday this year, and the lab was as busy as usual throughout November and into December. Suddenly, the holiday was in less than two weeks, and she had no plans made and was too grumpy to shop for people who didn't even want to see her. She complained to Idham, but he just offered some platitudes like, "I'm sure it will work out." She found herself snapping at him at times for his uncharacteristic lack of understanding.

The Monday before Christmas, Amy was in more of a funk than usual. She was leaving for work when she noticed an envelope made from Christmas wrapping paper attached to her front door. "Go to the car for a Christmas surprise," it said, and she double-timed it down the stairs to see what awaited her.

On her car was a box wrapped in the same bright paper. "There's a surprise for you at work," the note said. Amy was thankful that work was so close. After feeling blue for the last few weeks, this surprise was more welcome than ever.

She made it to the lab in record time and took the stairs. She knew that she would be a little winded when she got to the office, but she felt like a little girl again for some reason, and didn't even want to control herself. She was indeed winded when she rushed through the door. Jan greeted her just as she always did now, appearing to be unaware of the cause of Amy's haste as she rushed through the front door.

When Amy opened the door to her office, she almost burst out laughing. There was a wreath on her chair, holly on the desk, and Ed in a ridiculously bright Christmas outfit that looked like sweats or pajamas. He was holding a great big box wrapped in the same paper as her other two "clues."

"Merry Christmas, Amy," he said.

"It isn't Christmas for four more days."

"This present takes some preparation. Please open it, and then start getting ready."

This wasn't at all what she expected. Her excitement grew as she took the box and tore open the paper. Inside the large box, she dug through the layers of paper that Ed had used to hide the actual present. At the bottom of the box, she found two sets of plane tickets, her passport, and other travel documents, all wrapped with a bright red bow.

"What's this all about, Ed? I hope this wasn't too expensive."

"I have been saving for this trip for quite some time. I've worked hard to keep it a secret, so that you would be surprised. Please come with me to St Augustine and Jakarta, so that we can spend Christmas with both our families."

Amy was speechless. As the accountant, she knew that Ed made a good salary, but she also knew that his generosity used up a good part of his paycheck. She never expected this. She was so excited she rushed to Ed and kissed him, despite their resolve to keep their romance away from work. Someone cleared his throat behind her, and she jumped back, startled.

Chuck was standing there with a huge grin on his face, and her co-workers started clapping behind him. "Amy, I am giving you guys two weeks off for the trip, starting tomorrow. This time of year business slows down a little, so I hope I can hold things together until you two get back. We've moved up the Christmas party, so you guys can celebrate with us. After the party, I want you to go home and get packed. Ed's arranged everything, so all you have to do is get your things together and get ready to relax and enjoy. I appreciate both of you and hope you have a great vacation."

Amy was speechless. But Ed, who was not surprised, was able to express their thanks, and good cheer spread throughout the lab as people exchanged the traditional white elephant gifts and enjoyed a potluck meal. Amy went home and started packing. She was beside herself that she would be able to see her family at Christmas, and soak up some much-needed sunshine as well. But she was especially glad that Ed had invited her to come along with him on his first trip home since arriving in America. She knew that this trip was packed with meaning for them, and hoped that it would lead to a future together. The funk of the last two months had blown away like a morning fog on a sunny Florida day, and she practically flew as she packed her things for the trip. Ed had told Jada about his plans, and Amy teasingly reproved her for keeping the trip secret. Jada reassured Amy that she would take care of everything at the condo during her absence.

Getting to sleep that night was one of the toughest things that Amy had done. Her head was spinning at the thought of spending two weeks with Ed, and being with both their loved ones for this holiday that was so special to her. "That little devil," she thought to herself, "hiding all this from me. I don't know how he did it." Finally, however, she drifted off to sleep, her dreams filled with memories of joyous Christmases spent with her family.

Ed had planned for them to take the shuttle to the airport. As was usually the case, he made the arrangements so that he shouldered the majority of the burden, lugging his suitcase on the bus and meeting Amy at her condo very early Wednesday morning. Amy was glad that they had an early flight. She was so excited about the trip. Her parents had agreed to meet them at the airport, so they would get to be with family right away. The long flights were uneventful, with a short layover in Atlanta. Furthermore, it felt great to get off the airplane and bask in the warmth of the ubiquitous Florida sunshine.

They met Pete and Nancy Buchanan in the small baggage claim area at the Jacksonville airport. Her parents were delighted to see her, and jostled for the first hug, with her mom claiming that "prize." Pete, her dad, shook Ed's hand, telling him how excited he was to see Amy and how he appreciated Ed's efforts to bring his daughter home for Christmas. Ed, in turn, hugged Amy's mom politely and thanked both of them for their help both in planning the trip and in keeping it quiet. The hour-long drive in the family SUV was dominated by Amy and her parents catching up on the details of life on two coasts, and Ed seemed content to sit quietly and look at the scenery, since he had never before visited Florida.

In some ways, Amy was seeing it for the first time, as well. As the luxurious automobile pulled into the driveway of her parents' water view home, she realized that her relationship with Ed had changed the way that she looked at the world. What had just been "home" to her before looked different, even opulent. She realized that she had grown up wealthy, not "middle class" as she had always told herself. Furthermore, her new habit of asking "Do I need this?" made her realize that the house could be half its size, and most of the contents sold or replaced, and it still would be very comfortable. Amy also noticed that both her parent's shoes, and her dad's weekend dress, were all adorned with Ed's least favorite logo. It was odd to come to a place that had always felt like home and, instead, to feel like a visitor in a museum. Amy must have changed more than she thought. She wondered how Ed would deal with these surroundings.

Ed was the perfect gentleman. He congratulated Nancy on their lovely home, nodded appropriately when given a brief tour, and didn't say anything about the boomerang-shaped logo. Amy was surprised when Ed also said nothing when their parents offered them a bedroom in which they would, presumably, sleep together. He just carried their luggage up the stairs and thanked her parents for the lovely accommodations. Nancy had prepared a tasty meal, and the four of them sat at the large, dark wood formal dining table and talked about Ed and Amy's work, Pete's law practice, and their plans to tour the city the next day. After dinner, Ed and Amy excused themselves and headed upstairs.

As she had become more serious about her faith, Amy had decided to leave the promiscuity of her youth behind. Ed was a great help to her in this area, because he did not want to do more than hold hands, sit close to each other, and kiss before going home. Amy wasn't sure what the common bedroom meant, however. Was this part of the secret of the trip? Had Ed planned this all along? Amy decided to see what Ed was thinking.

"I'm surprised that you didn't say anything about my parents' clothing, car, home and furniture. I'm still stinging from our first conversation about my "offensive" clothing," she told him, gently punching him in the shoulder.

"Amy, I don't know why I decided to share my deep feelings with you that day. This is how I usually behave. I've lived in the United States long enough that I have become accustomed to the expensive, somewhat thoughtless lifestyle that most people live, even though I try to avoid it myself. If people ask me what I think, I try to gauge their real level of interest and respond accordingly. You're the first person with whom I have shared the depths of my heart, and I'm glad that I did. Your parents are proud of their possessions and want us to enjoy them. My lack of appreciation won't "unspend" any of this money, and will probably offend your parents without really enlightening them, so I decided to thank Allah and them for these comfortable surroundings and not pursue the matter."

"What about this sleeping arrangement? You have always kept me, physically, at a distance relative to the intensity of our relationship. I thought that you would make clear to my parents that we are not having sex. I've changed my ways, and want them to know it. Instead, you're implying that we are sexually active, and they won't give me any credit for the changes I have made in my life." Amy realized that this laid bare a weakness in her process of self-amendment, but real life doesn't have a "skip back" button, so she would have to see if Ed would chide her for her vanity.

"I'm sorry, Amy, but I never thought that the religious parents of an unmarried woman would offer a single room to her and a male companion. As it was, I was surprised by the offer and, being in "thankful guest" mode, decided to accept rather than rock the boat. You know that I am strongly attracted to you, and want to make love with you at the appropriate time, but this isn't it. I'll sleep on the floor, and we can take turns in the bathroom. It might be slightly uncomfortable, but we will only be here for a short time. I'm sorry that I made you look bad to your parents."

"As soon as I said what I did, it made me realize that I need to change for the sake of changing, not as a new way of looking good in the eyes of others. Thanks for not kicking my butt about my vanity, Ed. Also, thanks for being such a gentleman on this trip. I am so glad that Wyatt and my parents get to meet you and that we can all spend Christmas together."

"Why don't you take the first turn in the bathroom, and I will pray. It's been a long day, and I'm ready to get some sleep."

They took turns getting ready for bed, and each found a comfortable spot in the large guest bedroom. Amy was thankful that Ed didn't invoke guest privilege and take the bed, since she had never slept on the floor in her life. She enjoyed the intimacy of sharing their bedtime routines, as they never had before, but the physical proximity made it hard to just lie down and go to sleep. First Ed drifted off, however, then Amy, as they gave in to the exhaustion of their day of travel.

The next day, they had planned to visit all the tourist attractions of St Augustine. As the oldest city in the United States, there were all kinds of monuments, tours, and attractions like the wax museum to see. As they walked around the town, Ed was impressed with the beautiful buildings of the college, the massive durability of the Castillo, and the simplicity of the ancient chapel. The town was gaily decorated for Christmas, yet the warm, sunny weather felt like a summer day in Seattle. Amy was proud of her hometown, and took delight in showing Ed her old hangouts from her high school days. Ed inquired about the location of a local mosque for services on Saturday, and they found one on the outskirts of town. Amy didn't think anything of this, since they had made peace with each other's religious observances from the beginning of their relationship. Her parents, however, were startled by the notion that their daughter's boyfriend attended a mosque, but quickly covered their discomfort and kept on with their role as hosts.

Christmas Eve day was next, and Ed was delighted to meet Wyatt, Amy's brother, his wife and their two young children, who had taken the day off and come over to visit. Amy and Wyatt hugged enthusiastically and got down to the "serious" business of catching up on the events of each other's lives over the past year. Wyatt was clearly sizing Ed up, but Ed seemed oblivious to it, getting to know Wyatt, his wife Jane, and their two children, Josh and Abby.

After dinner, the kids opened their presents. Amy was glad to see that they seemed comfortable with Ed, and he with them. The kids were overjoyed with the presents they had received from their grandparents, and wanted to share the joy with everyone. In a way, this made her sad. Although she had not yet discussed this with Idham, her promiscuity had led to a venereal disease that, while cured, had scarred her fallopian tubes in such a way that her doctor had said that she would be unable to bear children. She knew that she should have talked with Ed about this already, but she had always determined that the current moment was not the appropriate one for discussing her infertility. She realized that this could become a major hurdle for Ed, who clearly enjoyed children and may want some of his own. She mentally kicked herself that she had not discussed the matter before. Sharing a room had somehow made the possibility of a life together much more real, and she realized that her infertility could doom their relationship, especially since it was entirely Amy's fault. "No point in brooding now," thought Amy, as she decided to enjoy this special holiday with her family.

Soon enough, it was time to go to midnight mass at the Cathedral. Ed took advantage of the break in family time as everyone was getting dressed to say his evening prayers, then they loaded up in their cars for the short drive to the cathedral.

Inside, the church was almost full. Ed was somewhat taken aback by all the statues that adorned the walls and altar. He had visited Amy's parish church, but this was much more elaborate than what he was used to. A mosque would never have a statue, as devout Muslims see this as potential idolatry. Ed did not genuflect as he entered the pew, a fact that Amy saw as reflective of his strong connection to his own faith, but her parents saw as a social faux pas. Although Ed was more attentive to the sermon by the bishop than most of the Catholics around him, his failure to go forward for communion seemed to offend Amy's parents, as well.

Having made their semi-annual trip to church, and thus fulfilling their religious obligation until Easter, Amy's parents were quite satisfied with themselves as they drove home. Wyatt had taken a separate car to the church, and he and Jane were taking their tired children home to bed. Pete decided to grill Ed a little.

"So, Ed, what did you think of the service. Sure is a beautiful church. With the Christmas decorations and the bishop presiding, that was quite a show. Was that your first time in a Catholic church?"

"No, sir. I've attended Amy's parish a few times, although it is much less elaborate than the cathedral. I agree that the church was lavishly decorated, and I appreciated the bishop's sermon about the humility of Jesus and the need to care for people in need all around us. I certainly was challenged to be more aware of the concerns of my fellow man."

"Well, I honestly drifted off a little during the sermon. It's good to take care of your family, but I've done enough pro bono work to know that most people who are poor are reaping the fruit of dumb decisions and laziness. If they'd just work hard, like I do, they could take care of themselves and their families, and we wouldn't have to hear about them all the time."

Amy wondered if her dad knew he was baiting Ed. She decided he probably didn't, and wondered if she had once been as thoughtless. Probably had, which was why Ed had taken her to task so many months ago. Listening to her dad helped her see how much she had changed, and she was thankful to Jada and Ed for their help. She had seen Ed's anger at injustice, and she wondered how he would reply to her father.

"My parents worked very hard my whole life, but could barely provide for my siblings and me. The opportunities they had were very limited, but they certainly took advantage of those opportunities. It's hard to blame someone who can only choose between bad and worse, not good and bad."

"I'm sure your folks are good people. But they are the exception. Maybe, if they were Christians, God would bless them and they wouldn't be so poor."

Ed wasn't quite sure what to say. The old rage rose up in him, as it hadn't in so long, but his lifetime of concealing it served him well. "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph are regarded in your church as being poor. In your gospels, Jesus makes a point of warning his potential followers about his lack of material possessions, so that they knew they would be sharing his life of destitution. Perhaps if they were better Christians, your God could have helped them, too," said Ed, with his tongue firmly in his cheek.

Pete got the barb. He changed his approach, getting down to what really concerned him. "We are one of the leading families in this city. We're well thought of by other people in the cathedral. Why don't you act polite during the service? You don't bow, you are one of the few people who didn't receive communion, and you make us look bad. What will people think of us, if you keep behaving like this?"

"Amy has taught me that you believe that Jesus is part of your God, and that he is truly present in the bread and wine at communion. I believe that Jesus was a great prophet, but that there is only one God, and that Mohammed is his final prophet. The genuflecting and taking of communion are based upon your beliefs about Jesus and the Eucharist, and I would be denying my faith and denigrating yours if I were to participate."

"Don't get so wrapped up in all the details. I don't believe in a lot of that hocus-pocus stuff myself. I try to be a good person, go to church on Christmas and Easter, and don't break the law. I've been going to church since I was a kid, and I think it's probably good for me, but I don't think too much about all that other stuff. Just do like I do and go through the motions. It keeps everybody happy, and the big man upstairs must like it."

Ed marveled that Amy had become the devout woman that he loved, given this kind of upbringing. His parents would never have said such horrible things about Islam, and were proud of his faith and devotion. "How do I reach a person who cares so little, yet makes so much noise about it?" Ed asked himself. He decided that the role of polite guest would best serve.

"Sir, my religious beliefs are the core of my life. They inform every decision that I make, everything I say and do. I don't insist that Amy or anyone else live like I do, but I do insist on the freedom to follow my own heart in this matter. Thank you for sharing your beliefs with me. I don't want to offend you, so perhaps it would be best if we do not attend your services together, although I do find them uplifting. Merry Christmas to you and your wife."

The end of the ride home had, mercifully, put an end to this discussion. Amy fled to her room, gave Ed a quick kiss, got ready for bed, and went to sleep. Ed lay awake for a while, fighting the rage that this thoughtless American had ignited, and that he thought he had quenched years before. Finally, he was able to collect himself, say his prayers, and go to sleep.

In the morning, he found Amy's old mountain bike in the garage. The previous day, he would have asked for a ride to the mosque or to borrow a car. After their verbal altercation, he wasn't ready to ask for anything, so he pedaled to the mosque for his services.

Meanwhile, the Buchanan house was stirring. Pete had appointed his wife as the bringer of sense to their daughter, so she knocked on Amy's bedroom door.

"Sweetheart, are you awake?"

"Yes, Mom."

"Are you decent? Is Ed with you?"

"Yes and no. Ed already left for his service, and he doesn't sleep with me, anyway. He never has." Amy was glad to say so, even if through a closed door.

"Can I come in?"

"Yes."

Jane came into the room and gave her daughter a perfunctory hug. It seemed that both women knew what was coming.

"Your father and I are concerned about this man that you are seeing."

"You always liked him when you talked on the phone."

"You never told us he was a terrorist. We never thought you would date a Muslim, much less bring him home. What will the neighbors think if our daughter's boyfriend is on the news for blowing something up? We always thought you would marry a nice Catholic boy."

"Ed's not a terrorist. Mom, I'm surprised at you. I could see dad saying something like that, but not you. Ed is such a gentle soul. If you only knew how much restraint he has shown in talking with dad, you wouldn't say something like that."

"We think that he's tricking you. He's playing nice until he gets you to his country, takes your passport, and puts you in one of those ugly robes. Speaking of, what's come over you? How are you going to attract a husband with those dumpy clothes you wear? You have a beautiful figure, and you should show it to all those potential Mr. Rights. I didn't raise you to hide your light under a bushel. Maybe if you looked better, you wouldn't have to settle for dating a terrorist."

Amy decided that she would have to channel Ed, since restraint was not her long suit. She took a deep breath before replying.

"Mom, there is more to me than my appearance. I have wasted too many years on men who only want my body, and I've found out through repeated heartbreak how little those relationships offer. Ed likes my looks, but he also likes to talk with me and spend time with me while I have my clothes on. He asked me to dress more modestly, and I do it for him. But it's amazing how different my relationship is with other men since I quit dressing like a strumpet. I get treated more like an equal, and less like an inconsequential toy. I'm no longer the one getting stripped by their eyes. The sexist guys who I've always attracted yet never liked leave me alone, and the good guys that I never meet before seem to turn up all over the place. I wish I had known this when I was younger, although then I probably would already be married and have never met Ed. He is such a good man. He's opened my eyes to so many things."

"So, he's trying to turn my daughter into a Muslim. You mark my words; you'll wind up barefoot and pregnant in a country where you have no rights, getting beaten every day by your "sensitive" husband. Then, you'll be sorry you ever met him."

"Ed respects my Catholic faith, and has even learned quite a bit about it. Furthermore, he's taught me about Islam, but certainly has never pressured me to convert. However, I am competitive enough that his five prayers a day have motivated me to pray more myself, and his charitable giving doesn't put mine to shame as much as it used to. He is no more a terrorist than you are. He has a different understanding of God, and is following it to the best of his ability. If you put aside your prejudices and get to know him, you will see for yourself what an amazing man he is. But I will tell you this. If Ed asks me to marry him, I certainly will. So you will have to make your peace with him as a son-in-law, if you want to be part of our lives."

"I certainly will not. I am a woman of my word, so you two can stay here until your flight to Indonesia, and leave your "American" clothes here until you return. But he is not welcome in my house after that, unless you talk some sense into him. And you need to get some yourself, young lady. I am only telling you these things because I love you."

Amy could see that what her mom really loved was her reputation in the neighborhood. But, since she didn't have anything productive to say, she decided to say nothing at all. Her mom spun on her heels and swept from the room. Amy couldn't help but shed a few tears. This is certainly not what she had planned for her Christmas at home.

She told Ed about the dust-up with her mom. He had encountered prejudice so many times over the years; it had become background noise to him. After his disagreement with Pete the previous day, this incident was not unexpected. However, he was upset about their poor treatment of their own daughter, and wanted to try to defend her or find some other way to make things right. They quickly realized, however, that he would have to surrender his beliefs to make peace. This is something he could not, and should not, do. They decided that the best thing to do would be get out of the house for a while, and let things cool off. So they decided to soak up as much of the Florida sunshine as they could that day, enjoying the beaches and some of the local historical sites. The next day, they rented a car and made a day trip to Jacksonville so that Amy could show Ed her college and the area in which she had spent her early adulthood. Visiting Jacksonville was an odd experience for Amy. When she had lived there ten years ago, it had felt more like home than her parents' house. She felt like she had finally become her own person in college. When she saw all her old haunts now, however, they seemed like stops on a tour of someone else's life. She realized anew that she had changed as profoundly since she had met Ed as she had from childhood in St Augustine to young adulthood in Jacksonville. This trip gave her a unique opportunity to juxtapose these three versions of herself, and made her both proud of and thankful for the person that she most recently had become.

When the time came for the next leg of their trip, they left some of their clothing in St Augustine and headed for the airport and the long trip to Jakarta. Since it is traditional to bring gifts when coming back from overseas, Ed had used some of their suitcase space for some nice framed pictures of him and Seattle, and some treats for his parents. Ed again reminded her that even clothing considered frumpy in America could well be risqué in Jakarta, and with that they boarded the plane to meet Ed's family.

Amy had never been on such a long flight. The 22 hour flight was one of the most interminable experiences of her life, made more challenging by the certainty that she would be making the same journey again in a week. She felt like a little girl with the wiggles as she read, watched TV, ate a little, slept, read, and gradually started to feel so pent-up in the airplane that she wanted to scream. The last time Ed had made the trip, it had been the nauseating voyage across the Pacific on a rusty freighter. He told Amy about some of the things he had seen and experienced at that time. Enough time had elapsed since the trip that he was able to find the humor in the experience, and share it with Amy. They also discusses their visit to St Augustine, and decided that it would be best if they didn't stop there on the way back from Indonesia. Upon their arrival in Indonesia, Amy made a quick call to her parents using her GSM-enabled phone to get their belongings shipped to Seattle, while Ed changed their return flight to end directly in Seattle. With that, Amy decided to put her experiences in the United States out of her mind and immerse herself in life in Indonesia.

This was Amy's first trip overseas, and she felt decidedly out of place. She couldn't understand the conversations around her, couldn't read most of the signs, and didn't know where to go or what to do. Ed took the lead right away, helping Amy get through immigration and navigating through the airport to the baggage claim area. They decided not to eat at the airport. Ed was eager to get home as soon as possible. His parents didn't have a phone, so he wanted to show them that he had arrived safely. Outside the airport, it was more like a Florida early summer, with temperatures in the eighties and high humidity. Although it was monsoon season, it wasn't raining at the time. Ed had handled their arrival so well that Amy almost forgot that he had never been to the airport in Jakarta, either. Although he had grown up in the outskirts of the city, he had never had the time or money to visit the city center. Nonetheless, he hired a taxi like he had done it a hundred times. It seemed that the driver was reluctant to follow Ed's instructions, but with suitable financial encouragement they were finally on their way. As they drove through downtown Jakarta, Amy stared out the windows at the skyscrapers and crowds of people. She realized that this was the largest city that she had ever seen. While the architecture was somewhat different from either Florida or Seattle, and she couldn't read the signs, she was glad that she didn't feel totally out of place. She had lived in large cities most of her life, so this part of the country quickly started to feel familiar as they drove along.

The further they travelled from the city center, however, the less familiar things felt. Back home, the skyscrapers of downtown would give way to smaller businesses, then mixed use areas, then suburban residential areas. In Jakarta, the city ended rather abruptly, and they were soon driving through an area of homes that seemed clean but ill maintained. As they drove further from the city center, the condition of the homes deteriorated rapidly. Soon, they were travelling on a dirt road, surrounded by shacks. They were the only vehicle on the road. The driver said something in protest to Ed as they had to avoid pedestrians, bicycles, and various types of carts, but, after Ed's reply, they kept going. At a wide point in the road, the taxi suddenly came to a halt. When they got out of the car, the driver had already tossed their luggage from the trunk of the vehicle and wanted his payment. People started to cluster around. Ed paid him quickly, and he jumped in the car, spun it around, and raced from the area. His behavior made Amy nervous, but Ed was smiling ear to ear. "I'm home," he told her.

They pulled out the handles on their suitcases and started walking down the dirt road. Ed clearly knew where they were going, so Amy followed him. The sights and smells assaulted Amy's nose. Obviously, there was no sewer system here, making the edges of the roads filthy and smelly. The "houses" were put together with odd shaped pieces of wood, with rusty tin roofs, so each was an irregular shape, and they were jammed up against each other in no discernible order. As they walked along, people stared at them. Amy felt like an alien, and realized that she probably looked like one, too. Being in such a different environment made her nervous, but none of the curious onlookers said anything to them. Ed took long, rapid strides. He was clearly comfortable here, and eager to reach his destination. Amy tried to disregard her discomfort and just follow his lead. The contrast between the opulence of her parents' lives, even her own life, for that matter, and the abject poverty of Ed's neighborhood was almost overwhelming. She didn't know places like this existed, yet here it stretched as far as the eye could see. As they walked, she realized that she had been entirely unprepared for this experience. She thought that Ed's descriptions of his early life were hyperbole, to make his point. Seeing his hometown, she realized that he had actually whitewashed the reality of this grinding, almost unbelievable poverty. This was not like visiting a new city in the US. There appeared to be no plumbing, no garbage service, no electricity, no convenience or grocery store. Just lots and lots of dirty people in dirty houses next to a filthy, smelly street. Now she started to worry. Were they going to live in one of these hovels for a week? Could she live in this dirt and filth? Would she get a disease? As she walked along, her fears grew larger and larger. Ed seemed to sense her trepidation and held her hand a little more tightly, although local moral law required that they be very circumspect about expressing affection in public.

Finally, they came around a corner and an elderly Indonesian man and woman came slowly from one of the shacks to meet them. They smiled and moved towards Ed, each kissing him in turn. Amy had fallen behind, and she caught up as they finished greeting Ed. She got to try out the bhasa Indonesian greeting that she had practiced, and was rewarded with big smiles and handshakes. They were ushered into the two room "home" with more smiles and gentleness. These two small people were talking very rapidly with Ed, probably trying to catch up on all the years that had passed. Idham was smiling and relaxed, and Amy realized that she was the only one for whom this was not "home".

It was hard to know what day or time it was. Tired as she was from the flight, Amy sat in a small chair as Idham opened their suitcases and gave his parents the presents that they had brought. Amy could see now why he had tried so hard to pick simple items, for here even the basic picture frames and small ornaments were the newest, most noticeable things in the house.

After the time spent catching up, Ed began to act as interpreter, formally introducing Amy to his parents. They inquired about her family and her religion. Ed explained that such inquiries were not considered intrusive in Indonesian society, and she replied simply and politely. Ed mentioned that they worked together, and Ed's mom was interested in the type of work that she did, since Ed's mom had worked full time most of her life. Amy answered these questions briefly, feeling somewhat ashamed of her comfortable life in such destitute surroundings. Ed had thought to bring a picture calendar of Seattle, and they talked about the climate, landscape, and people of their hometown. Ed told Amy that he had already told them about how he had come to the lab, and how he and Amy had met. Overwhelmed by the poverty and foreignness of everything around her, Amy was only too pleased to lay down on a lumpy blanket on the floor, cover herself with a mosquito net, and try to sleep with the heat, smells, and tropical noises all around her. She shared an area on the floor with Ed's mom, and he slept over by his dad. Although they were physically closer than even in St Augustine, the distance between them seemed like a thousand miles. Finally, Amy's exhaustion overcame her fear and discomfort and she was able to sleep.

In the morning, Idham's mom prepared a simple warm meal for them. She frowned when Amy was unable to help, but recovered her equanimity rather quickly. Amy wasn't sure how to find the privacy to change her clothes, and obviously wouldn't be showering any time soon. Ed had put their suitcases in a corner of the hovel, then they spent the first day helping with the tasks of daily life. Amy went to the market with Ed's mom. She felt like she was on display, as people avoided her and stared at her unusual dress and light skin. The whole place seemed dirty and covered with flies compared to a supermarket, so Amy was glad she didn't have to decide what the family would eat. She helped carry the purchases home, then went to the well with Ed's mom, returning with the heavy terra cotta jar filled with water of questionable quality. She was glad that Ed had insisted that she get vaccinated the previous month, although his insistence without explanation at the time had been very irritating. Washing clothes in the river was hard as well, as was tending the cooking fire. Ed and his father went visiting around the neighborhood, but Amy gained a new appreciation for the labor-saving devices in her condo that made her life easier than she realized. The daylight was spent quickly indeed, and she was again able to sleep due to fatigue.

The next day was a "field trip" to the shoe factory that, in some ways, had brought her and Ed together. Ed's father accompanied them, to act as a chaperone, and they made the relatively short trip on foot to the deserted factory. It was a two story, almost windowless building being reclaimed by the jungle already. The chain on the door had been broken, and they went inside. Watching for spiders, snakes, and other creepy crawlies, Amy saw the unsafe exposed belts and drive machinery of the workmen's tools. Even deserted during the daylight, the inside of the building was dark and stuffy. Amy imagined spending twelve hours a day in such a horrible place, and shuddered. In contrast, her work as an accountant looked better than ever. If Chuck were here, she would probably kiss him in thanksgiving for her job. Again, her talks with Idham had helped prepare her for this place, but the reality of it made her glad that she was not wearing any branded clothing any longer. Ed, if anything, had understated the poverty and difficulty of his upbringing.

They ate a picnic lunch of some unknown food, and then returned on foot to the house. Fortunately, Amy's exercise routine had given her some stamina to prepare for the constant physical exertion required by life in this slum. The only good thing about the constant physical toil was that it made the lumpy blanket on the dirt floor look somewhat inviting. If it weren't for fatigue, she probably never would have been able to sleep. But, as it was, she was so tired that she fell asleep as soon as possible the first few days, thus enabling her to adapt to this entirely different lifestyle and time zone. This could turn out to be the longest week of her life, although one of the most informative.

The next day, several of Ed's siblings came to the house came to visit. They were all polite to Amy, but their real joy centered on seeing Ed after all these years. Amy felt the outsider again as not a word of English was spoken the entire day. Everyone took their leave well before nightfall, since there was no extra room in the hut, and the boredom of the day made this the first night that Amy lay awake, thinking about her experiences in a world that she really could never have envisioned. She missed her time with Ed, but realized that the strict Indonesian views of propriety made it impolitic for them to be unaccompanied together.

The next day, Ed and his father went for a long walk. Amy had learned quickly, and was much more able to help with the housework, cooking, and other chores. She found herself feeling very uncomfortable with the stares of the neighbors when she went outside, and with her own smell and unaccustomed lack of cleanliness. The hut became a refuge for her. She seemed to be getting along well with Ed's mom, but she really wasn't sure what this gentle, quiet woman thought about her.

When Ed returned a couple of hours later, he and his father were all smiles. Ed immediately took Amy aside, and his parents went to the other side of the dwelling to give them all the privacy that could be had. Ed first told her that his parents were aware that they would be speaking English for a while, and would not feel excluded. Then, he reached inside his shirt and pulled out a beautiful, small diamond ring.

"Amy Buchanan, now you know all about me. When we first met, I never dreamed that you would become my closest friend. We have finally met each other's families. I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Amy didn't know what to say. She had never envisioned that she would get engaged in a third world hovel. She had always pictured a fine restaurant with a beautiful view, like the Space Needle in Seattle. But she knew that she loved Ed and wanted to be his wife, and she realized that this small taste of his early life had given her a new understanding of him that she could not have gained in any other way. "Ed, my love, I have waited impatiently for this moment. My answer is yes. I want to be your wife!"

Being where they were, their kiss was more restrained than would be expected upon an engagement. In answer to her question, Ed told Amy that his parents were worried, at first, that Amy would try to tear Ed from his faith or that she was too loose or materialistic. They had seen her initial fear and distaste that she had tried so much to hide. But as she had worked alongside of them, prayed with them, and lived with them, they had come to see that she was just different, not bad. Ed also said that they had seen the joy in his eyes when he spoke with and of Amy, and that they wanted him to experience that joy for the rest of his life. They must have sensed that Amy had accepted their son's proposal, because they came over with big smiles and kissed her. While it wasn't what she expected, Amy said to herself, she had love and family with her, and that was the most important. Ed advised her to hide the ring by wearing it under her clothing hung from a simple chain around her neck. It took a long time to get to sleep that night. Finally, she dozed off, filled with joy and more at peace than she had been the rest of this two week adventure.

The next day, they said their goodbyes to Ed's family, took a few last photos of Ed's parents and their home, and then walked out of the slum in search of a taxi. They were leaving a day early, but Amy didn't question Ed about it. It turns out that he had a treat in store for her, as they drove downtown and rented two rooms in a large, modern motel. Amy luxuriated in her first bath of the week, washed all her clothes with the laundry service, and felt like herself again. She and Ed had a nice meal in the hotel restaurant, which had a lovely view of the lights of the city. They talked about their experience of the past two weeks. Amy told Ed about her fearful state of mind as they walked towards his parents' house. Although nothing she feared had come to pass, Ed thanked her for her courage and willingness to adapt to such a different lifestyle. He admitted that he had also gotten used to the luxuries of American life, and found it difficult to re-adapt to his now alien environment. Amy couldn't help teasing him for making her think that she was the only one struggling. Finally, they said their goodnights chastely, mindful of local practice, and each went to their own rooms.

The next morning, Amy was able to perform her traditional morning routine, minus the running, for the first time in a week. Never had the mundane seemed so sweet. While the week in Jakarta had been unforgettable, and had taught her many things, she was glad to be able to again enjoy the luxuries that she had previously taken for granted. She met Ed in the lobby, and he complimented her on her appearance. She was finally able to wear his ring, and it sank into her heart that they were to be united in marriage. She felt a little giddy on the taxi ride to the airport. The pre-boarding routine was much simpler In Jakarta than in the United States, and they found their places on the Boeing 747.

The 33 hour flight home was sooo long. She was bored out of her mind, not sure of the date, and sore and squirmy as she had ever been as the relative cold of a Seattle winter assaulted her upon her arrival. She was home! She didn't care if she never saw another airplane again! Six hours to Florida had always seemed long, but it would be a quick jaunt in the future compared with her trip to Indonesia.

Arriving home was something of a culture shock. Everything was so clean and new, the roads were crowded with expensive automobiles, and her condo was nicer than the hotel in which she had stayed in Jakarta, and nothing like Ed's parents' home. Jada was home when Ed dropped Amy off, and she was the first one to see Amy's ring. Jada could see how happy Amy was, and so she made the appropriate sounds of enthusiasm, but she really didn't seem to understand what Amy saw in Ed. To Jada, he was a real stick in the mud. Amy felt obliged to show Jada the photos from her trip. Jada questioned her about her parents' house and some of the sights from St Augustine. She thought that the pictures of Ed's parents and their home were taken purely from an anthropological perspective, and she shuddered when Amy told her she had spent several days living in that shack. Amy realized that, one year ago, she would have had the same perspective as Jada, so she was muted in her explanation of her visit to Jakarta. Jada had obviously missed her, and wanted to talk a while longer, but the flight had been so exhausting that Amy begged off, went to her room, and collapsed before even unpacking her suitcase.

Amy slept very soundly, and woke up at some time during which the sun was shining. She was so jet lagged that she had no idea what day or time it was. She got out of bed and went for her run for the first time in a couple of weeks. The cold outside shocked her awake, as she hadn't been cold for the last two weeks, and she was reminded again how easy it is to get out of shape. She only made it three miles, and that was a struggle. She would have to build back up to her full distance.

Back home, it was mid-afternoon Saturday Seattle time. Jada was out, and Amy wanted to call Ed right away. She hoped he was up. Ed answered, and she made arrangements to go over to his house for the evening.

The drive over to Ed's house was almost as shocking as the Seattle airport. She wavered between gratitude and guilt as she saw an area that she previously thought of as somewhat run down through new eyes. Everything in Seattle seemed palatial compared to what she had seen in the slums of Jakarta. It didn't seem fair that Ed's family and friends had so little, while she and her fellow Seattleites unthinkingly enjoyed so much. Amy realized that all her complaining about money and lifestyle in the past had been unwarranted, and she decided never to do so again. Furthermore, she wanted to do something to let others share in the plenty that she had always enjoyed, but only now appreciated. However, she wasn't sure how to take the first step. Perhaps Ed would have some good ideas about this. Ed rarely shared his thoughts unasked, Amy found, but he had a depth of understanding about many things that continued to surprise her. He was like a well, placid on the surface, but with depths that were difficult to plumb. Amy loved that about him.

They embraced and kissed when Amy arrived, then went downstairs to Ed's part of the house. Now that they were engaged, they had decisions to make. First, they would have to decide where to live and how to take care of their current housemates who depended upon them. Since Amy owned her condo, and Ed was renting a room in his house, they decided that they would move into Amy's place. Ed had already told Amy about the plight of the family with which he was living, so they made their plans contingent upon Ed's friend finding work. Amy hadn't talked to Jada yet, but Jada now had the financial means to live on her own, so Amy felt comfortable asking her to find her own place. Ed volunteered to help with Jada's move, when it might occur. Ed and Amy talked about the style of wedding that they might have.

She was surprised when Ed proposed a Catholic ceremony. She had investigated, and found that it would be canonically possible, but they agreed the right pastor would have to be found to respect Ed's freedom of conscience to follow his own faith. Furthermore, they each would have to decide if the premarital counseling required for a church wedding would be acceptable.

"Why do you want a Catholic wedding, Ed?" she asked.

"You love your faith, and I want to support you in it. Second, most of the people attending the wedding will be your Catholic friends, and that will be more comfortable for them. Third, I have a dream that we will sponsor my parents, and that, when they arrive in the United States, we will celebrate an Islamic wedding with them."

Ed had shared his idea with trepidation, but Amy was immediately enthusiastic. She had been dealing with the guilt of leaving Ed's loved ones in such squalor while she lived in comfort.

"Ed, I'd love to bring your parents here to live with us. I know that their home is all they know, but we could share a good life here with them, and I know how much you would enjoy having them with us. Let's get started on that as soon as we can."

Ed seemed so relieved after his bombshell, it seemed time for hers.

"Ed, I need to tell you something, as well."

"What is it, my love?"

"I've told you that I've been involved with several other men."

"I know. I wish it weren't so, but I've forgiven you."

"Ed, what I haven't told you is that I've become infertile from my promiscuity. The doctor was quite certain. If we marry, you'll have no heirs, your parents will have no grandchildren from you, and we will never have the joy of a child from our union. Also, in my faith I must be monogamous, but I know my barrenness would give you permission to take a second wife. If this is the case, I would prefer that we not marry at all. I want to give you all of me, and I want to be your one and only. I will understand if you can't bear this burden."

Ed was taken aback by this revelation, but didn't take long to make up his mind. He never did.

"Amy, I want only to be with you. I've been waiting for you my whole life, and part of my dream has been fathering children with my true love. Perhaps we can adopt an unwanted child, or take on foster children. But I don't want just a mother for my children, I want a soul mate. That's what you are to me, and that's why I want to marry you. I love you and want to spend the rest of our lives together. I would never take another wife, although such a thing is permitted. I am going to marry once in my life, and I hope that you will consent to be my bride."

This sharing of each other's' burdens created a wave of relief that swept over both of them. Ed took a willing Amy into his arms and kissed her passionately. Each could feel the longing of the other. Then Ed broke the embrace and stood up. "Amy, I've waited my whole life for you. I long to be united with you in every way after the wedding. Obviously, we'll need to help each other stay chaste until then."

Amy knew that Ed was right. If he had not had the strength to turn back, she wouldn't have. What a man she had. She laughed at herself for the hundredth time that she had spent so long despising a man who was perfect for her, while chasing men no good for her at all. The ironies of life! "I agree, Ed, I don't think I have your strength. Let's make sure that Jada is around when we get together, or meet for coffee or at the park or go for a walk. We'll have the rest of our lives to enjoy each other. Let's do things right."

Amy left rather hurriedly after that. After two weeks of family, drama, change, and love, work was looking less attractive than usual the next day. Amy decided to go right to bed and get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow would be a shock to her system, and she needed her strength.

The next morning, Jada was ready to go for a run with her. They headed out of their building into the cold. Jada wanted to know about the ring.

Amy told how Ed had proposed to her in his parents' house, leaving out the details of their extreme poverty. She could tell, however, that this did not meet Jada's expectations of a romantic engagement. Jada was further surprised that they hadn't "done it" over the last two weeks, and did not need privacy any time soon to do so. Jada had regained enough of her previous poise and confidence that she was not lacking for partners, although she did not bring them home. Amy did not ask about that part of her life, and Jada generally didn't bring it up. It was just another way that they had grown apart after the accident.

Amy decided to broach the subject of the condo.

"Jada, Ed and I plan to live in the condo."

"I thought you said that you were "saving yourself," if such a thing is possible after the life we have led."

"Not now. I'm glad you're around to help us stay on the straight and narrow. Besides, I love having you around when I'm not at work. I was talking about after the wedding."

"I assumed that you wouldn't want me to live with you after the wedding. I have a thought. What if I buy your condo, especially if you would carry the mortgage? I love the place; it's where I started my new life. I have the money from my settlement, and I will soon graduate from law school and earn some income again. This place is great, but it sure isn't a family home. What do you think?"

Amy couldn't believe her good fortune. The condo that she had always loved had recently become a symbol of her previous life of conspicuous consumption. Especially since returning from Jakarta, her home felt opulent and was an obvious contradiction of her desire to live more simply and help others. With the housing market so depressed, she had been resigned to living in the condo with Ed. But Jada was offering a way out that seemed good for everyone.

"I'm offering a conditional yes. Of course, I need to talk to my fiancé about it, but I think he'll agree, as well. If possible, let's plan on moving ahead with the purchase, if I can rent from you until the wedding."

"After all you've done for me; it would be churlish in the extreme to do anything else. I'll miss you and even your newfound prudery when you move, so the longer we postpone it, the better."

Amy couldn't wait to tell Ed, but had to catch up with a mountain of work that had developed during her absence, plus the stream of well-wishers that wanted to see the ring and congratulate her. Finally, at the end of the day, they happened to meet in the elevator. Ed gave her a quick hug, and Amy told him about Jada's offer. Ed agreed that this would give them an opportunity to start fresh with their new family, and he was eager to tell her about the man at his mosque who had agreed to rent the room in which he currently dwelt, albeit at a lesser fee. At least, the family he was with would continue to have some income. And Ed's friend had the time before the wedding to, hopefully, find some work. Things seemed to be falling into place.

They decided to have the wedding on the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend, thus giving them a three-day weekend to celebrate their anniversary each year. Amy would be in charge of contacting the parish priest and scheduling their pre-marital preparation, contacting the bishop's office to get permission to marry a non-Catholic, and the decorations. Ed encouraged her to keep the ceremony and decorations simple, in keeping with his own traditions. While she was working on the wedding plans, Ed would work on finding a place to live and work with Jada on the condo sale.

Between their jobs and the details of preparing for their marriage, time went by quickly. They had decided to invite Amy's family, and any members of Ed's Islamic center that wished to attend, as well as people from work, Amy's parish, and her three friends. Amy's brother agreed to be one witness, and Dawn to be the other. Their pre-Cana weekend of marriage preparation arrived before they knew it. This class, required before they could have a wedding in the church, had made them both nervous. They feared that they would have to share more about themselves than they would like with strangers. But their fears proved groundless, and they would up enjoying the opportunity to get to know each other better and sort through some of their assumptions about marriage and family. They discovered that they had not discussed Islamic dietary laws. Although they had begun their relationship shopping together, Amy had never thought about the fact that Ed avoided alcohol and certain foods. She discovered that this was an important part of his observance of his faith. While she had come to observe the fasts associated with Lent and Advent, she had never otherwise altered what she ate for religious reasons. At first, she resented this intrusion on her life. But, she realized that part of her love for Ed was her desire to make him happy. That was more important than the occasional strip of bacon, after all. Ed offered to teach her about this part of his lifestyle, and she agreed to this alteration in their diet. They realized that marriage would involve many compromises, and decided to use this conversation as a template for working through the conflict of assumptions that marriage so often brings.

The weekend of the wedding finally came. Amy's family arrived on Friday, and stayed at a downtown hotel. Chuck had agreed to give them the next week off from work, so they decided to move for their honeymoon, since their Christmas trips had been so expensive. Their splurge for the wedding was a night at the famous Edgewater Inn located right over Elliot Bay on Seattle's waterfront.

The church was not very full for the wedding. Since Ed would not participate in a mass, they decided to do just the wedding ceremony. After so much planning, the wedding itself passed in a blur. One of Ed's friends agreed to videotape the ceremony, so that they could remember the details of this most significant day. They held the obligatory reception in the gym of the parish school. Amy was radiant in her wedding gown, and they made a handsome couple. Amy's parents had apparently made their peace with this marriage, since they attended and enthusiastically greeted the attendees in the reception line. Finally, they had fulfilled their obligation to their family and friends, and they were free to leave. Jada and Dawn agreed to take care of the presents, and they had already paid for cleanup of the gym, so Ed and Amy eagerly left the reception and headed for the hotel in their wedding attire. They enjoyed a long kiss in Amy's car before driving down to the waterfront, knowing that there was finally no need to hold back their desire for each other.

The hotel staff was courteous and helpful, although Amy created quite a stir arriving in her gown. Amy was surprised when Ed picked her up and carried her through the door of their room. They wasted no time before consummating their union, and it was all that they had hoped. Amy realized that this was what had been missing from all her sexual escapades of the past. Some had been more physically enjoyable than others, but none had been an expression of the deep mutual love that she and Ed shared.

The next morning, Amy woke in Ed's arms, and was filled with thanksgiving for the love that they were finally able to fully share. They spent a relaxing morning together, then packed up and headed for their new home. Ed's rented tux had to be returned on the way.

They had decided to live on Beacon Hill. Ed knew the area; it was relatively close to their downtown jobs but less expensive than some other nearby communities. Ed had found a thirty year old split level home to rent. While it seemed a little run down to Amy, she realized that her standard had been shaped by the "more, more, more" mentality of her culture and her family. This would be the first time that she had voluntarily taken less than she could afford. It was a surprisingly difficult step, but she felt good about it. The four bedrooms and two and a half baths would be ideal when Ed's parents arrived, and they even had upstairs and downstairs family/living rooms. Furthermore, the money that they saved every month would help with the expenses of bringing Ed's parents to live with them. Ed had done a great job shopping for the house, and Amy told him so. "Wait until you get inside" he told her.

To her surprise, she found that the house was fully set up. The furniture that she and Ed had decided to bring along was not only moved but in place. Groceries, towels, dishes, pans, beds and bedding, and bathroom furnishings were all in place. There were even pictures on the walls. Amy was delighted. Ed explained that Dawn had coordinated the move as her wedding gift, and that the family with whom Ed had stayed had provided the muscle over the previous night and morning to get the furniture set up.

They decided to do a little re-arranging, and then they opened their wedding gifts and started on the thank-you notes. Since they had both been living on their own for so long, they had requested that donations be made on their behalf to their favorite charities. Most guests had followed their suggestion, but Amy's parents had bought a beautiful glass bowl for them. Amy wanted to sell it and donate the proceeds, but Ed encouraged her to keep it so as to not offend her parents, and because it brightened their somewhat austere living space.

They spent the rest of the week around their new home, talking together, making love, reading, developing a running route, doing work in the yard, and getting to know their neighbors. It was so relaxing and peaceful, the perfect way to start their new life together. They also got started on their next project, bringing Ed's parents to the United States. Amy had discovered that this would be quite difficult if Ed did not become an American citizen. She didn't realize that she could not sponsor his parents. They could come visit for a year on a visa, but she couldn't bring herself to set up an arrangement by which they would have to go back to their hovel in Jakarta. Fortunately, Ed had been in the US on a green card long enough to apply for citizenship apart from marriage, so they decided to take that path. They were able to fill out the paperwork during their honeymoon at home.

After they went back to work, they began to develop a routine. They only had one car, so they would ride back and forth to work together. Sunday afternoons were for grocery shopping, as they would go to a farmer's market and purchase what they needed. Their resolution to purchase things directly from the person who made them was rapidly becoming their hobby, since they had to find these vendors on their own. For now, they decided to buy sophisticated manufactured electronic devices used, since they are rarely made by individual people, and are often made in offshore factories with questionable labor practices. But they found craftspeople that made clothing, furniture, linens, tableware, and decorative items. It was sometimes a struggle for Amy to integrate these items into some kind of decorative scheme, but she enjoyed a challenge, and each item became a delightful reminder of the artisan by whom it had been made.

Furthermore, although these items were more expensive than big-box store items, they found that they did not have to replace things so often, and began to eliminate impulsive shopping as a hobby. By sharing household expenses and buying only things that they needed, while redefining "need" more tightly, they were accumulating some savings. Amy found that she was able to enjoy her life more fully now that she was not spending so much time and money trying to impress others with an expensive facade. She was closer to Dawn than ever. They went to mass together almost every weekend. Over the last couple of years, Amy's values had become more and more like Dawn's. They had developed a strong friendship of mutual support and accountability. Amy still enjoyed her visits with Jada, as well, but she had to remind herself that the seemingly foreign environment in which her friend lived had been her home for years. After their disagreement when Jada moved in, Amy hadn't seen Char. She called her old friend a couple of times, but had gotten no response. She and Ed were closer than ever. They had the occasional disagreement, as all couples do, but the love they felt for each other allowed each to adapt to the other's expectations and assumptions. For each of them, their marriage joined the bedrock of their faith as the source of strength and stability in their lives. Between their work and household duties during the week, and both services during the weekend, time was going by quickly. Amy was so thankful for this new life of love and peace.

MAI

As an adult reflecting on her childhood, Mai realized that her family had been very poor. At the time, however, she had no basis for comparison, and did not realize that they were destitute. Like most people in north Thailand, her family, friends and neighbors faced the same difficulties in making ends meet. Everyone would work as hard as they could in the fields, then hope that their crops would support them for the whole year. This did not mean that Mai's childhood was dour, however. As part of a large family, there were always other children to play with. After she did her work, she had time to run along the dirt roads with her friends and siblings, pick flowers, enjoy what food was available, explore the surrounding jungle, and generally enjoy spending time in an unspoiled natural environment with lots of kids her own age. She remembered often being hungry, but everyone she knew was also hungry, that was just an expected part of their lives. She was especially close with her next younger sister, Jaidee. They would sometimes make crude dolls from materials that they could find, then she and Jaidee would play house. They would pretend to care for their "children", imagining a happy family like their own with a loving, hardworking husband, good-hearted children, nearby grandparents, and the blessing and education of the wat, the local Buddhist temple. Mai was especially drawn to the monks of the wat, and they seemed to enjoy teaching such an apt student. From the monks, she learned the foundational teaching of Buddhism, that life is suffering and that detachment from the things of this world is the path to peace in this life and, in some future life, nirvana. She learned the ten precepts of a monk, to avoid harming living things, stealing, sexual irresponsibility, lying, intoxicants, and excess in food, entertainment, adornment, lifestyle, and money. Many people had been taught these ideals, but in her village, Mai was unique in her determination to fully assimilate these teachings in her life. As she got to know the "abbot" of the wat, this good-hearted older man became her model, and she tried to emulate his kindness to all, especially his willingness to help those in difficulty, his happiness without envy for those who experienced good fortune and his equanimity both in good times and in bad. As she progressed along the path of Buddhism in her young life, she began to see that not everyone she knew tried to follow the teachings of the wat in their daily lives. Sometimes, she would see people who paid lip service to Buddhist teachings when in public, and then completely disregarded them when they thought that no one was paying attention. This inconsistency of belief and practice could have made her cynical. Instead, she focused on the peace and tranquility that she felt in her own heart when she followed the teachings of the Buddha. In her inner life, she would constantly strive toward the Buddhist goal of detachment.

Around the time she was twelve, things changed in her village. Although the rice that her family cultivated for both food and income would wax and wane in quantity over the years, the variations were not very pronounced and seemed to have little effect on the family's income or routine. Now, however, her father and mother were becoming more and more concerned about the unusually low prices being paid for rice. Rice was both a subsistence and cash crop for them. They would eat some of the rice that they grew, but they would sell a good part of it to purchase other foodstuffs, tools, seed, and household goods. Many years later, she learned that the Asian economic collapse of the late 1990's had deflated prices for everything, including her family's rice crop. At the time, however, this was a bewildering and unexpected change that seriously disrupted the peaceful ebb and flow of life in her family. The occasional hunger that she had always experienced became more regular. Generally, it didn't intrude on the peace that she had trained herself to feel, but Jaidee and the rest of her family seemed to be more and more worried and edgy.

Over the years, a few members of the community had taken the long and difficult journey to Bangkok, and of those few, an even smaller number would send money home to their families. It was considered a great boon for a family to have a son or daughter who worked in the city, because the cash that they could earn and send home would make a big difference in their parents' finances. In fact, many families doubled or tripled their annual income from the contributions of one child working in Bangkok. However, the journey to the city was long, dangerous, and expensive, and was only occasionally undertaken by the most adventurous, strong and courageous young adults. As a result, no one in the village seemed to be thinking of this distant employment as a solution to their problems until an older, green military truck came unexpectedly roaring up the road to the village one afternoon. The truck's nearly unmuffled engine shattered the usual quiet of the village, and people came from the fields to see the source of this disturbance.

The men who emerged from the truck were unlike anyone the villagers had seen before. In contrast to the local people's hand-made clothes, they wore silk shirts and pants clearly made in a factory. They were loud and seemed to have been drinking in the middle of the day. They didn't seem to be soldiers, but their leader carried a pistol and they had some rifles, as well.
Despite the coarseness of these brash interlopers, Mai's community extended them the hospitality for which Thai people are famous. They were brought to the wat, which also served as the community center, and given a nice meal of rice and vegetables, despite the scarcity of food. When offered the best the community had to offer, two of the men started to grumble about the quality and quantity of the food, but their leader sharply reproved them, and then politely expressed their thanks for the hospitality of the village. Mai had followed the men to the wat, both from curiosity and from a feeling that her beloved wat may need protection from these ruffians. Furthermore, she could tell from the Abbot's formality with these men that he was uncomfortable with these uncouth strangers.

After the meal, the leader asked to speak with the adults of the village. When pressed for an explanation, he shot a silencing glance at his companions, and then explained that he had come north to hire workers for a factory in Bangkok. That announcement created quite a buzz in the village. What fortunate timing, said some. This was an unheard of opportunity, safe transport to the city and assurance of work upon arrival. Suddenly, the mood of the local folks changed towards these visitors. "That's why they're so different," said some. "They are managers at a factory, and make a lot of money, and live in the hustle and bustle of Thailand's largest city." After all, people who lived in a place that seemed almost mythical to these simple country people could be expected to behave differently. In fact, such behavior might even be a sign of urban sophistication, thought others.

This man announced that they were looking for five girls who were smart and in good health, who could come with them and start this new life. The Abbot asked him why he did not include some of the young men of the village. He pointed out two that were strong and capable. But the leader of this group said that they had found girls to be more precise in their work, and he reminded the abbot that the machines in the factory provide the strength to get the job done. Families were clustered around the men by this time, and ten or twelve girls were either proffered by their families or volunteered with their parents' permission. Mai did not feel comfortable with these men at all, and had started working her way back through the crowd, when her parents reached her and Jaidee, who was, as usual, tagging along with her big sister. Her parents asked Mai if she was interested in taking this job. After all, it sounded like quite an adventure. No, Mai replied, she was happy with her simple life and didn't want to leave. Her parents insisted that she volunteer. They had become poorer than ever, and were tired of eating only infrequently. They needed the income from a job, and Mai and Jaidee were young enough that their labor would not be sorely missed. Besides, they thought, only Mai, the little monk, would pass up this opportunity for adventure and advancement. Finally, here was a stroke of good fortune for their family. They told the girls that they must volunteer for this job to help their family.

Mai still was nervous. She was content to live her life just as her ancestors had done for generations, and the Abbott's obvious discomfort with these men weighed heavily on her mind, as well. But she knew that her family needed her help, so she agreed to volunteer. "I'm not one of the biggest, strongest girls in the village," she thought to herself, "so they probably won't pick me, anyhow."

At her parents' urging, she and Jaidee moved to the center of the wat, where the volunteers were in a rough circle around the three men. There were about a dozen girls, each too young to have become an indispensable worker in the family's rice fields. The men looked them up and down. Mai shuddered inside when the leader looked at her like a ripe vegetable at the market. Her distrust of him grew, but she forced herself to stay still and quiet, hoping to be overlooked.

Several of the girls were turned away, as the men laughed at them for missing teeth or called them ugly, like they and their families weren't standing right there. The girls slunk away in disgrace. Soon Mai and Jaidee were part of a small group left in the center of the crowd. "We will hire these six girls," the man said. "I'd like to meet privately with each girl's parents, to discuss the terms of employment." Gradually, the crowd dispersed, many disappointed, and some jealous of Mai's parents, who had two daughters chosen. The Abbot had pointedly left early in this selection process, as a way of announcing his disapproval. But the promise of a windfall seemed to overwhelm his otherwise strong influence on the community. The men told the assembled parents that they would offer a "signing bonus" of about six months wages to each family. Then, the girls would be brought to the factory and trained. The cost of their transportation and training would be deducted from their wages, as would a small stipend for their living expenses. The rest of their earnings would be sent to their parents at the end of every month. Surprisingly, no one questioned this unknown man's credibility, or asked how they would stay in touch with their children. The promise of financial security in a time of want seemed to overwhelm the collective prudence of the villagers, and they all eagerly agreed to this offer. The men were ready to leave at once, but Mai's parents asked for one more night with their girls, which the leader graciously offered. His associates slapped two of the girls on the backside as the crowd dispersed, which normally would have been intolerably rude, but was overlooked because of the money to be made.

That night, Mai could not sleep. The Abbot went to each family that night, arguing that these men were not to be trusted. They were sending their children away from home forever, with someone they had never met. This was imprudent, he said. Mai's father would not listen, accusing the Abbot of wanting Mai for an unpaid role at the wat when her family needed this income to survive. The Abbot acknowledged that Mai was a good student, and that he enjoyed her company. He was not usually given to self -promotion, but he bent his personal rule to remind Mai's father of some difficult situations in which he had given good advice. Mai's father acknowledged his help in the past, but insisted that the family needed this income, and that he could do nothing else. The Abbot advised strongly against the job, saying that he feared for the girls' safety, but Mai's father turned his back on the wise old man and shooed him out the door. The insulted abbot left to talk to the other families.

The next morning, two families had decided not to send their daughters away. They offered no explanation when pressed, but it seemed that they had heeded the Abbott's warning. The men with the truck harangued them about the wealth they stood to lose, but they would not change their minds and they soon left for their daily work in the rice fields. The four girls who remained, including Mai and Jaidee, were helped into the back of the truck, and their parents were given the promised bonus. Then, with no fanfare, the girls left the only world they had ever known with these strangers.

The girls huddled together in the back of the truck as it bumped its way over the dirt roads. They had never ridden in a vehicle of any kind before, and two were nauseated from the motion and diesel smell. The men left them there for the entire day, then slapped one of them that night when they saw and smelled the mess in the truck. The girls were made to clean up the truck with some sacks they found lying in a corner of the bed. At least, they were able to wash themselves in a nearby river. The men made a fire and cooked a meal of meat and rice. After they had eaten, the offered the girls some of the food that was left. Everything was all mixed together. Since Mai had vowed not to eat meat, like the monks, she politely refused. One of the men told her to eat what she was given, or she would get no food at all. Mai calmly returned the plate, which he ate. They filled the truck with fuel from a can attached to the side, then added more wood to the fire and prepared to sleep for the night. One of the assistants grabbed a girl by the arm to take her with him, but the leader told him to wait, that they didn't want any trouble, so the girls were left to sleep by themselves on the opposite side of the fire. The men drank themselves to sleep, and soon the camp was quiet.

They drove for a week, stopping twice along the way to hire more girls. By the time they arrived in the outskirts of Bangkok, there were fourteen adolescent girls in the back of the truck. They had learned not to vomit in the truck, so they stayed fairly clean. Although there were so many girls, they were so small from malnutrition that there was room to spare even with so many of them. They did not speak much, other than telling each other their names. Some of the girls seemed to be in shock from the loss of all that was familiar. A few were almost bursting with anticipation, craning their heads around the edge of the truck's canvas cover to try to catch a glimpse of the big city that they had only heard about in tones of awe. The leader had finally agreed to feed Mai only rice and vegetables, and she rejoiced in this small victory and the surplus of food they were able to buy on their journey. For the first time in most of their lives, the girls had not been hungry for a whole week!

As they drove past the ramshackle buildings on a paved road, the girls could see the tall towers of central Bangkok through the haze in the distance. Most of them were dumbstruck by this world so different from their own. Mai alone sat quietly, her equanimity more threatened by her distrust of her new employers than her wonder at a new environment. When she had been torn from her home and family so suddenly, her normally peaceful soul had been severely jarred. She had used the mostly quiet time riding in the back of a the truck for the last week to restore her sense of detachment.

After miles and miles of travel, they finally arrived at their destination. It was a two-story wooden building with no windows. They entered through one of the two doors. An older woman, who could have been one of their grandmothers, met them at the door, paired them up, and then led them upstairs. The girls could hear people behind the doors that they passed, but it was early in the morning so there was little activity. Mai and Jaidee were shoved into a room off a long hallway, and the door was closed. They heard a noise after the door closed, and when Mai tried to open it, she found that she couldn't. Since she had never seen a locked door before, this startled her, and she hit the door with her small hands and yelled for help.

After a few minutes, she heard the same sound and was nearly knocked over when two of the men from the truck came through the door. She started to say something when one of them slapped her across the mouth. As she fell to the floor, the associate pushed her sister down as well. Mai got up and started hitting him, but he laughed off her blows, then the other man grabbed her and pushed her against the wall. "Now," he said, "you'll pay for your insolence." She struggled against him, but he hit her in the head, and she was stunned. He hit and kicked her. She heard her sister's cries and tears, and tried to fight back. But the men were strong, experienced fighters, and they beat the girls until they lay unconscious on the ground. "Welcome to your first day on the job," one sneered at the unconscious girls, and then they left and again locked the door behind them.

When Mai awoke, she was so sore she could hardly move. Jaidee was still unconscious. Mai lay there for a while, almost believing that the whole experience was a nightmare from which she would awaken. But then she was able to focus on her surroundings, saw the room in which she had been locked and beaten, and she knew that it was all real. After a little while, Jaidee regained consciousness and began sobbing in the dark room. Mai struggled against her own injuries to drag herself across the floor to her little sister. As she held Jaidee's injured body, she felt an anger and helplessness that she had never before known. They lay on the floor together, not knowing what to say but at least taking comfort in each other's presence.

At some point, the door opened and the grandmotherly woman came in with some food and the man that had beaten Jaidee, who was armed with a knife and a club. Mai tried to attack him, but he struck her in the chest with the club, and she lay where she fell. They left the food and went out of the room. After they left, Mai heard the same sound as they had made yesterday, and knew that they were trapped behind the locked door. With the injuries from both beatings, every muscle in her body was sore. Fortunately, it seemed that she didn't have any broken bones, but every movement was an agony. Jaidee was still lying on the floor, weeping. Mai crawled over to her sister and held her, like her own mother had done for her when she was afraid. Jaidee stopped crying. Mai showed her the food, and Jaidee was able to eat. Mai couldn't bring herself to eat anything, so she dragged herself to the cot and was somehow able to roll onto it. She passed out from her injuries.

When she awoke, Jaidee was sitting on the end of the cot, looking at her. She asked Mai what time it was, but Mai didn't know. Clearly, this was not the factory job that their parents had been promised. Mai had no idea what was going to happen to her or her sister, but the brutality of the beatings she had already experienced made her fear for her life. She could see even more fear on her sister's face, however, so she did her best to hide her trepidation. Mustering her strength, she sat up on the cot. Every muscle ached, but at least she was able to move. There was a little rice left from the previous day, so Mai ate that. Then, the two girls sat on the cot, not sure what the day would bring.

After a while, the door opened and the grandmotherly woman came in with another thug. The girls retreated to the very corner of the room, but they only left a bowl of rice and some water in a pitcher. The girls were relieved that they were not further abused. They ate some of the rice, drank a little water, and lay down to sleep.

The third day, Mai was starting to get used to the perpetual dimness in the room. It had no windows, but light from the corridor outside would leak around the door and allow the girls to see a little. This waiting was a torture of its own. The girls didn't want to be beaten again, so they did not call attention to themselves. They had heard some noises in the building around them, but they couldn't tell what was going on. Obviously, the men who had brought them from their village had lied. So they were locked in a dark room with no idea what the future would hold. The room was starting to stink from the chamber pot that was never emptied, but other than that they were fed and protected from the elements. When she felt rational, Mai realized that they had what they needed to survive. But often, the fear of the future would assault her, and she would struggle to contain her terror.

They were brought rice and water again. The girls were able to stand when the door opened, and they moved back even further, covering their eyes against the relatively bright light in the corridor. "What, no complaints about the food? You're not so mouthy now, are you, you stupid bitch?" asked the thug, rhetorically, as he moved towards Mai with his club raised. She cringed, silently trying to back even further away from this violent man. The older woman who had brought them their food put her hand on his club arm. He put down the club and turned towards the door with her, and then they left without another word, again locking the door behind them.

Mai waited a while, to make sure that they were really gone, then went silently to the door. She finally had recovered enough that she could move around with only a little discomfort. She tried the handle, gently adding more force to it until she was twisting as hard as she could, but it wouldn't move. Pleased that she had been able to test the door so silently, she leaned against it, gradually increasing the force she was using until she was pushing with all her strength. Jaidee saw what she was doing and started to come over, but she was making too much noise. Mai motioned her to be quiet, then both girls pushed against the door, but it wouldn't budge. They silently retreated from the door and sat down on the cot to eat their rice. After their meal, they sat in silence for a while, not sure what to do next. Eventually, they slept. There wasn't anything else to do. At least, all the sleeping was giving them time to heal. Mai had learned much about maintaining a sense of detachment in her visits to the wat. However, she had never experienced so much abuse and fear as she had in the last few days. She decided that she could not free herself at this time physically. But she could free herself from the constant fear of an unknown future. She decided to work hard to reclaim the sense of peace and detachment that she had always cultivated at home. This would also allow her to help Jaidee to be brave in this harsh new environment.

They heard noises at the door again, and retreated to the corner. This time, the older woman was accompanied by two thugs from the truck. She brought the rice and water, as she always had, and left them on the table. Then, one of the men went out of the room and brought in a wicker chair, which he set down for her. The woman sat on the chair and motioned for the girls to sit on their cot. She reminded them that their parents had received a large payment when the girls were brought from the village, a payment that would save their families in this time of low rice prices. She told the girls that they did not have any skills, and could not work in a factory. Mai started to speak, to protest that they would work hard and learn what they needed, but one of the men slapped her once, and then drew back his hand to hit her again. The old woman gestured for him to stop. He obeyed, but his desire to hit Mai was clearly written on his face.

The woman continued as if nothing had happened. She reiterated that the girls did not have any skills for working in a factory. As a result, they had been brought to this place. The older woman explained to them that this was a brothel, and that they would work here. Their families would receive the promised payments, as long as they did their jobs well. She knew that these farm girls would not know about such a place, so she described in graphic terms what they would be required to do. The girls were horrified, as were most of her new employees, but she had done this so many times that she disregarded this ubiquitous response. She told them that they would receive food and payments to their families if they did their jobs and more beatings if they did not. They would have one more day to prepare themselves, and then they would be expected to start working the next night. She would send her men for them as they were needed. The girls were crying as she left the room, but that was to be expected. She had raised herself from the streets in similar circumstances. These girls would have to be survivors like her, if they wanted to better their situation. If not, they would perish and she would find others to take their places. There were hundreds of girls in the northern villages for her men to recruit. She had done, and continued to do, what she had to in order to survive. These new girls would have to do the same.

Once the woman and her thugs had left, the two girls sat quietly weeping. One thing that Mai had learned in the wat is that people worry about things that rarely come to pass. If they do, a person must meet the challenge. Forsaking worry is an important part of the discipline of detachment that monks practice, and something that Mai had tried to learn. In this situation, however, what was happening was far worse than any of her worries. Obviously, she did not want to be violated by strange men. Furthermore, she had learned that sexual continence was part of the devout Buddhist life, and she was committed to that lifestyle. She also needed to protect her sister from this horror, and was not sure what to do. She wanted to pound on the door and scream, but she knew that would probably just lead to another beating. After that, she would probably not be strong enough to help her sister. The woman had told them that they would not be killed, because they were valuable business assets. Given the old woman's hold over these men, Mai was not sure that she could goad the thugs enough so that they would kill her and Jaidee, and thus liberate them through reincarnation. If they survived such a beating, they would be too weak to resist for a long time.

Jaidee was so traumatized by this horrible news that she went to sleep, exhausted by fear. Mai could not sleep. She decided that she would offer herself in Jaidee's place, and see if she could at least protect her sister from this evil. She lay awake, trying to plan an escape.

The next morning, the madam who owned Mai and Jaidee was somewhat surprised to find a police official at her door. Although her activities were technically illegal, most government officials were willing to look the other way, mindful of the large contribution that the sex trade made to the Thai economy. For others, she would offer them free visits with her girls, cash payments, or both. As a result, she was on good terms with the local government. This man, however, was someone she had never met. She assumed that this was another shakedown, however, and met the man with a smile.

"How can I help you, sir? Would you like to come visit with one of our young ladies?"

The man looked at her with disgust. He was a career officer of middle rank. His superiors tolerated brothels such as this, so he also had to leave them alone. He had never visited one before, however. He had several daughters of his own, and places like this made his skin crawl. He always had his junior men deal with these places, and he tried to pretend that they didn't exist. They made a mockery of the justice that his organization was supposed to uphold. His superior, however, had insisted that he handle this transaction himself. The customer was very special, and no one was to know what happened. The officer rationalized that, at least, he would save one girl from this gulag. Hopefully, the place to which he was taking her would be better than this evil place.

"I have no interest in your illicit offer. If I could, I'd close this place down and put you in jail. However, I have been ordered to procure a servant for a wealthy, overseas client. I want you to provide me with a girl who is in good health, and one who has recently arrived, so she won't be missed. It would be better if she has a family member who you can use to be sure that she will not run away, when she arrives at her destination. I need her clean, appropriately dressed, and ready tonight. I will come to pick her up this evening. " He went on to tell the madam that he would pay the equivalent of twenty years' wages for the girl. He could see the woman's excitement at this high fee, and knew that he would get what he wanted. He left quickly. He wanted to go wash his hands. He felt dirty from this whole distasteful business.

The madam had to think. Finally, a way to escape! Ever since she had been abandoned as a young girl, the madam had worked in the sex trade to survive. Almost all the girls that she had known over the years were dead, victims of violence or disease. Although her fear of a return to the streets herself motivated her to bring in new girls and keep the brothel going, she had enough humanity left that sometimes, when she couldn't sleep at night, she regretted what she was doing. This money would give her the opportunity to "retire." She could abandon the brothel to the men who "recruited" new girls for her, buy a house in a part of the city where she was not known, and live the rest of her life in peace and leisure. How fortunate that she had two new girls, sisters, who would allow her to take advantage of this opportunity. She went to see them immediately.

When the old woman entered the room, Mai and Jaidee were nearly paralyzed with fear. They sat on their cot, staring at the floor with unseeing eyes. She sat in the same chair, with her guards, and got Mai's attention.

"I have new work for you," she told the girl.

Given the nature of this horrible place, Mai wasn't sure what to think about this. Mai nodded to assure the woman that she had heard, but remained silent.

"I have a special offer from a gentleman who needs a household servant. He lives in another country, so you'll have to make a long trip. I don't know what he wants you to do when you arrive. However, you would leave tonight, and won't have to work here. If I were you, I'd do this. This place will probably kill you and your sister if you stay."

"What about my sister," asked Mai? "I will not abandon her to this evil place. Maybe she can come with me."

"I have to be sure that you follow instructions and do what you are told in your new home. But I'll make you a deal. If you accept this offer, I'm going to leave this brothel and live the rest of my life in peace. I will allow your sister to be my servant. She, also, will never need to work here, as long as your employers are pleased with you. However, if you displease them, I will know, and I'll send your sister back to a brothel or to the streets to die. You can save her if you want by taking this job." This was as good a time as any to be sure that the younger sister would give the needed leverage to ensure the older one's obedience.

Mai's face lit up. Here was the hoped-for deliverance! While she still feared for her own safety in this new arrangement, she would be able to save Jaidee. However, she wanted to be sure that the evil old woman would hold up her end of the bargain. "I'll do this, but I must know that my sister is being treated well as time goes by. When you get reports on my performance, I want evidence that Jaidee is being treated well, per our agreement."

"I agree. What's your name, girl?"

"Mai."

"Mai, you need to get ready. I want you both to clean yourselves up. I'll have clean clothes for you when you're done. Your sister will stay in this room until I'm ready to leave this place. Take the next few hours to get ready, because you leave tonight. I'll bring some warm water."

The men stayed in the room after the old woman left. She returned in a few minutes with a pan of warm water and some clean cloths, as well as a dress for Mai. Then she took the two men and left the room, locking the door behind her.

Mai was a little nervous, but also elated. Here was the hoped-for salvation! She was eager to tell Jaidee about this new plan. Her sister was still sitting on the cot, almost frozen by fear.

"Jaidee, we are going to get out of this prison!"

Her sister turned to her and smiled. "We're going home? How did you get us released?"

Although her sister was almost two years younger than her, Mai was taken aback by her naiveté. Hadn't she heard the madam earlier in the day? "Jaidee, our parents sold us to these people. We are not going to be able to go home. If we stay here, we will be forced into prostitution. I have found a way to do something else."

"I don't believe you. Why would our parents sell us? How can a person buy a human being?"

Mai felt that her sister was missing the point. "I think they needed the money to take care of the rest of the family. I agree it isn't right. But that's not the point. Right now, we have three options. Option one, physical escape in the next few hours, is impossible. Option two, working in a brothel for years, is not acceptable. I've been given a third option, and I intend to take it."

"You, what about me?"

"Jaidee, this plan will help you, as well. I'm going to be sent to a different country, to work as a household servant. The woman who owns this place will leave after I am gone, and take you with her. As long as I do what I'm told, she'll keep you with her as a household servant. You will not have to work in the brothel."

"You're leaving me by myself? To be a slave? What kind of sister are you? How am I going to get married and have a family as a slave?"

Mai was angry. She herself was afraid of going to an unfamiliar country, and also did not want to be a slave. She felt she was doing the best she could for her sister under the circumstances, and Jaidee was responding with ingratitude. She decided to be brutally honest with her sister. "Jaidee, we arrived here with twelve other girls. Today, they're going to start being raped every day of their lives. Most likely, they will die here. You heard the madam; you know what goes on in this place. If I don't go away, that will happen to you, as well. This is the best that I can do."

That stopped Jaidee. She seemed to understand their predicament for the first time. "Mai, I'll miss you so much. Thanks for helping me. I hope I'll see you again."

Mai doubted that they would ever be together again. She didn't say so, however. She hugged her sister tightly, and offered one more piece of advice. "Jaidee, no one seems to care if we live or die. We have to take care of ourselves. I advise you to do what you are told, say as little as possible, and don't depend on the police. I don't think all these girls could be enslaved without police complicity. If you are able to escape, and go to the police, you will probably be returned to this woman. You remember the beating from the other day. When you are ready to escape, you must be sure that you know a safe place you can go to hide, and that you will be able to earn enough money to take care of yourself right away. Don't try to escape until you have a good plan. It may take a few years. Be patient. No matter how bad it gets, remind yourself of what you have escaped and be thankful. I'll miss you."

Mai took off her dirty clothes and started washing herself with the cloths that she had been given. She saved one, and gave it to Jaidee, so that she could also clean herself up. Mai changed into the clothes she had been given and sat on the edge of the cot, mindful not to get herself dirty again. The girls waited.

As he had said, the police officer returned that evening with the agreed-upon payment. The madam took the money and hid it, aware that her men would readily kill her for such a sum of money. She would have to leave at once, before they found out about her windfall. Hopefully, they would be glad to get this place and the money that it earned, and would not follow her. She would write a note telling them that her conscience would not let her continue in this business, so she was leaving it to them. Then, she would go to another part of the city, assume a new name, and live the rest of her life in peace. It would be nice to have this new girl, Mai's sister, to take care of her.

The policeman cleared his throat, interrupting her plans. She took one of her men and went upstairs for Mai. The girl was clean and dressed as she had been told. "The man who'll take you where you're going is here. You will go with him now. As for you," she said to Jaidee, "be ready to leave soon. Don't say anything to anyone, or I'll have you beaten."

Mai accompanied the evil old woman down the stairs. She was still afraid, but did not want to show it. She would do what she had to for Jaidee, and try to survive. Given her suspicions, she was not entirely surprised to find a man in uniform waiting for her. She walked up to him boldly, and looked up into his eyes. "I'm ready," she said.

This girl reminded the officer of his own middle daughter. She was almost the same age. He knew what was in store for her, and was sad. However, his family depended on him, and he could not support them in any other way. So, like he had on many other occasions, he decided to do the distasteful deed to which he had been assigned. As they got in his car, he told the girl what was going to happen. "A wealthy Thai citizen living in another country has purchased you. You're going to be sent to his country by ship. Once there, the authorities will think that you are his daughter. If you run away, they will return you to him, and he'll punish you. However, if you serve him, it couldn't be any worse than the brothel you left."

Mai was indignant that a man who was supposed to protect the people was working as a slave trader. While there were no police in her village, the Abbot of the wat had served as the arbiter of justice. Mai knew him, and knew he would never compromise his integrity for anything, even in small matters. Here was an officer of the law, breaking it! "Sir, why are you helping these people kidnap me? I haven't done anything wrong."

The officer had thought the very same thing. He slapped her in the face with the back of his gloved hand to quiet both her voice and his conscience. "Be quiet. I only have to deliver you alive. A few bruises will heal on the ship. If you don't cooperate, I will beat you."

Blood trickled from the corner of Mai's split lip. She had said what she wanted to say. She held back the tears and sat in the passenger seat of the car with her head held high. She would not give this man the satisfaction of seeing her cry. They made their way through the dark streets of Bangkok to the docks in silence. Finally, they drove through a gate in a chain link fence and arrived on a large concrete platform, parking next to a huge building with no windows. All around were huge, rectangular metal boxes, each bigger than the hut in which Mai had been raised. The policeman handcuffed her left hand to the steering wheel, then got out of the car and went around the building. There were overhead lights which made pools of light in the surrounding darkness as far as she could see. She waited for a while, and then the officer returned and opened up the back of the car. He took out a bag and a jacket, then opened the door of the car and unlocked her arm. "Come with me," he said, gruffly. He handed her the jacket and the bag, which contained some clothing he had brought from home. "It'll be cold on your trip across the ocean. Take these, they'll keep you warm." Mai was surprised by this gesture of kindness, and she took the bag as she followed him around the building.

He pointed at something as big as the buildings she had seen in Bangkok, which had some of the large rectangles stacked on top of it. "That is the ship that will take you to your new home. I will introduce you to the captain, and we'll put you on board."

They walked towards the large, orange and black ship. Once they got closer, she saw that it was made of metal, and had started to rust in places. It was attached to the concrete dock by huge ropes. This place was like nothing she had ever seen. They climbed up a metal stairway attached to the side of the building behind which they had parked. Mai was a little tired by the climb. From the top, she could see how large the ship was. She could also see huge devices for moving the large rectangles, and many more large ships. Since it was dark, she could only see parts of this harbor. She had never seen so much machinery in her life, and was somewhat overwhelmed. She had decided beforehand, however, to appear stoic, facing whatever was to come with courage, and hiding her fears from her captors.

They were met at the top of the stairs by a tall, strong man. He and the officer shook hands. "This is the passenger I told you about. You'll take her on board, and see to it that she arrives at your destination in good health. If she does not arrive at her destination, I will arrest you and your crew on your return, and you will never see the light of day again. I trust you'll do your job." The officer put one hand on his gun, and, with the other, handed the man an envelope with money in it. The man smiled and grabbed Mai by the upper arm. "Don't worry," he said. "I will make sure she arrives at her destination." He took her across the gangplank onto his ship. As the policeman watched her go, he hoped that she would survive the ordeal before her. Then, he put the whole nasty business from his mind and walked down the stairs, got into his car, and drove home to his own family.

The captain almost dragged Mai onto the ship. He was very strong, and obviously was not going to let her get away. He had put the money in his pocket, and he pulled her through a group of men that had assembled at the side of the ship. One of the men slapped her on the butt as she passed. The captain turned around and hit the man in the face with his left hand. The man cried out and put his hands to his blood nose. "See here, you idiots. Nothing is going to happen to this girl. If you touch her, you'll be sorry. I'm going to put her in a spare cabin. Leave her alone. If she tells me any of you monkeys have even said a word to her, I will punish you most severely, and your pay will be docked. Now, get ready to cast off. We leave at sunup."

He had kept his grip on her arm for the entire speech. He turned abruptly and took her down some stairs and to a metal door. He opened the door and brought her into the room. There was a bed, a table, a light on the ceiling, and two unfamiliar items. He closed the door, and showed her how the sink and toilet worked. This is the first time she had ever seen indoor plumbing. He told her that this would be her room for the duration of the trip, then he turned on his heel and left. He locked the door behind him. Mai wandered around the room for a few minutes, to familiarize herself with her surroundings, and then sat on the bed. She had not slept, and was very tired. She used the switch that the captain had shown her to turn off the light, and then lay on the bed and went to sleep.

When she awoke, she felt disoriented. It took her awhile to remember all that had happened the previous day. She turned on the light, drank a little water from the sink, and used a toilet for the first time. It felt as if the room was swaying back and forth, but she attributed that to her fatigue, her injuries, or the strange experiences of the last few weeks. She sat on the bed and collected her thoughts. She hoped that Jaidee was safe, but she had done all she could for her sister. Now, she would have to survive herself.

Someone knocked on the door, the lock was released, and the captain entered the cabin. "We are at sea now," he told the girl. "There's no way to safely leave the ship. If you fall overboard, you'll surely die. However, I'm being paid to deliver you to the United States, and that is what I intend to do. If you give your word that you will stay on the ship, I'll let you do what you wish, although I would advise you to stay with me. I have ordered my crew to leave you alone, but they are a rough bunch. I wouldn't recommend being alone with any of them. It's time for breakfast. Come with me to the galley."

Mai did not want to die. She wasn't afraid of death, because she had lived a good life, and hoped for a good reincarnation. However, she knew that Jaidee was depending on her, so she agreed to stay on the ship. The captain led her down a narrow passage, up and down some stairs, and through another metal door into a room filled with the smell of cooking. They sat at a small table, and a man brought them each a plate of food. Mai saw that there was meat on the plate, so she pushed that aside and ate the bread and fruit instead. It was delicious! The captain was surprised by how much she ate. She must have been very hungry.

He didn't know the girl's story, and didn't want to. He just knew that he was to get her across the Pacific Ocean, and that he would be met at certain coordinates in international waters by men who would take her to her destination. The other vessel's arrival at those coordinates on that day would be their authentication. He was to deliver the girl to them and finish his voyage. He would make sure that they reported that she was in good health. He didn't want to run afoul of the authorities back home.

As they ate, the captain found out that her name was Mai, and that she was also a Thai national. When she tried to tell him more details about her life, however, he impatiently waved his hand, telling her that he did not need or want to know her story. He assumed that some foul play was involved, but the less he knew, the better he felt about his part in it. This avenue of conversation closed, he decided to tell her about the ship. He told her that it would take about two weeks to cross the Pacific Ocean. Mai had never seen a large body of water, so they talked about the storms and all the things that the captain had seen in his career at sea. After they ate, he invited her to come to the bridge with him. He pointed out features of his ship along the way, but there was so much information that Mai couldn't retain all of it.

When they arrived on the outside of the ship, which Mai learned was called the "deck", the sun was shining. As far as she could see, Mai was surrounded by water. It made her a little nervous, being completely out of sight of land for the first time. She unconsciously stepped back from the rail. The captain noticed but didn't say anything. They continued to the bridge. The captain showed her a chart which she found fascinating. It showed her own country, the vast ocean, and the country to which she was going, the United States. It was much larger than Thailand. She wondered what it would be like to live there. She asked the captain to show her where she was going, but he made the impatient hand motion again and changed the subject. Instead, he showed her the controls of the ship and the electronics that helped them to cross the vast ocean. He called the engine room and some of the men on the radio. She was amazed by this ability to talk with people so far away. She decided that this must be how the madam would check on her, and she on Jaidee. She sat in a chair on the bridge, and watched the ocean and the way in which the captain piloted the ship. They ate another meal in the afternoon, and then she went back to her room and went to sleep.

The next morning, her stomach was very upset. Her room was moving much more than it had the first day. She went on deck to see what was happening. The ship was being tossed around on large waves, and the skies were quite gray. A cold, driving rain pelted her. She quickly returned to her room and vomited in the toilet. Then, she lay on her bed and tried to sleep. She pulled the blanket around herself like a cocoon. For the first time, she wept for herself and all that she had lost, and all that she feared was yet to befall her. Although she was not normally given to self-pity, her fears about the future and her seasickness overcame her for a while. Eventually, she went back to sleep.

When she awoke, she was finally able to collect herself. At the wat, hadn't she learned that life is suffering? When it proved to be true, why was she letting it upset her so? Before, she had thought suffering was a bad crop, or hunger, or unjust punishment by her parents, or not getting her way. She had never envisioned that it could include exile to a foreign land as a slave. But she had learned ways to foster a sense of detachment, and she decided to apply those skills to her predicament. After all, she could not currently change the situation in which she found herself. She could only either choose to be ruled by fear or master her emotions and experience inner tranquility during this ordeal. As she lay on the pitching bed, she decided to master her fears. Gradually, her training reasserted itself, and she was able to do so. It didn't stop her from being seasick, but she didn't care so much. She cleaned herself up as best she could, and tried to be at peace. At one point, the captain stopped in to check on her. He seemed unaffected by the rolling of the ship himself, but he went to get some medicine to help with her motion sickness. She put the fabric with the medicine on her upper arm, drank a little water, turned off the light, and tried to sleep.

When she awoke, the fear was behind her. The storm seemed to have calmed on the ocean and within her as well. As she walked around the ship, the men noticed how much more self-possessed she seemed, but attributed it to the calming of the stormy ocean. She found that, once she quit indulging her fears about the future, there was a lot to learn about the ship and the world around her. A couple of the men made her very uncomfortable, and she stayed away from them. The rest, however, seemed to enjoy the young woman's presence, and did their best to explain how their part of the ship operated. They days passed quickly as Mai learned about ships and the ocean.

The day before the rendezvous, the captain decided to tell Mai what was in store for her. He had come to appreciate this quiet, bright girl, and wanted to provide her with what little help he could. He told her that they were to meet a small boat out in the open ocean. She would go down the side of the ship to that vessel, and they would take her to her new home. At that point, she would be only hours from land. The captain showed her on the chart the rendezvous point. When she asked who would pick her up, he wanted to wave her to silence, but didn't. He admitted that he didn't know anything about these people, that he had just agreed to transport her to them for a fee. Mai appreciated his kindness to her during the voyage, and didn't reprove him for his involvement in slavery, as was her first instinct. Instead, she agreed to make sure that the new men who met them reported that she was in good health when she left the cargo ship. She thanked the captain for his hospitality during the voyage, and went to her room. Deciding not to let the uncertainties of the coming day upset her, she turned off the light and went to sleep.

The next day, the sea was calm and the skies were clear. Mai was grateful for the good weather. As they steamed towards the north, the captain checked the GPS navigation system, altering speed and course to get to the rendezvous point at just the right time.

That evening, they saw a bright yellow boat with red stripes bobbing on the ocean in the distance. The captain had explained that they were in International waters, and that they would not have any trouble with local authorities as a result. The much smaller boat started making a wake as it moved towards the gigantic cargo ship. Some of the crew threw ropes over the side of the deck to the smaller craft, and it was made fast to the side of the large ship.

The captain decided that he would use one of the life boats to lower Mai to the yellow boat. His men could use one of the ladders fastened to the side of the ship, but he didn't want her to lose her grip and fall into the ocean. So the crew uncovered one of the life boats, loaded Mai and her bag in it, and swung it out over the ocean. The powerful electric motor of the winch lowered her about 35 feet to the deck of the waiting boat. A man on the craft's smooth, shiny deck helped her out of the life boat, across the slippery deck, over the windscreen, and into the cabin. As the lifeboat was raised, the lines to the larger boat were untied and they cast off.

This boat was much smaller than the container ship, and crewed by only three men. She tried to ask the man that had met her to call and report that she had arrived safely, but he replied to her in a language that she didn't understand and led her below the deck. He turned on the light, then closed and locked the door behind her.

The room she found herself in was small but luxurious. She had just started to look around when the boat lurched forward and she fell onto one of the benches. The engines of the cargo ship had made a constant low droning noise, but were only really loud in the engine room. As this boat accelerated, the engine noise was very loud. Also, the boat bounced over the ocean like a stone that she had skipped on the pond at home. After falling onto one of the soft, while leather benches, she took in the luxurious surroundings. There was polished wood trim, stainless steel appliances, and white leather on every other surface. In truth, this was the most beautiful room in which she had ever been, and she was somewhat in awe. The motion of the boat made it hard to stand, however, so she lay on the bench, wondering what the future would hold for her in this new land.

After a while, the pitching of the boat decreased, and the door to the cabin opened. A different man motioned for her to come outside. They were right on the surface of the ocean. From the height of the container ship's deck, the waves had not seemed so high. But down here, even slight waves looked much more threatening. The man motioned for her to sit in one of the seats, and then he sat in an adjacent one. She watched him put a strap over his lap and fasten it. He motioned for her to do likewise, and she did. She found that she could see the "bridge" of this small craft. The captain was carefully watching a glowing screen that showed a dot moving towards its center. When they had overtaken the dot, the third man reached into the water with a pole ending in a hook. He lifted a large package out of the water and set it on the deck. The man seemed very strong, yet the package was hard for him to lift. He set down the pole and took a seat. The engines roared to life again, and they were racing across the dark ocean. Mai had never gone so fast in her life, and she enjoyed the feel of the cool, moist wind on her face as the boat shot through the night. They picked up three more packages, and then they travelled a long time through the night. At times, Mai would see lights to one side or the other of the boat, so she knew that they were closer to land. The captain seemed to use one of the screens, which showed much more detail than any on board the container ship, to navigate through the darkness. After a couple of hours, the engines quieted and the boat slowed. Mai was thankful for her jacket, or she would have been quite cold. It NEVER got this cold in Thailand. Slowly, the boat turned this way and that until they reached a wooden dock that was dimly lit by an overhead light. The man who had brought her below decks tied the ship to dock, while the strong man who had picked up the packages took her into the cabin, handcuffed her to a steel fitting, then loaded the four packages in with her and locked the door. He turned off the light as he left. Mai calmed herself again and went to sleep.

She awoke to the same man unfastening her wrist and practically dragging her through the door. The big packages had been removed from the cabin during the night. The men did not speak to her, and rarely spoke to each other in their foreign tongue. It seemed that each did his job and that was the extent of their relationship.

In the light of day, Mai saw that they were moored in a man-made harbor with boats of all shapes and sizes. Moored right next to them was a large white ship. A Thai couple was on the stern deck, and the big man with her lifted Mai over the two boats' transoms at the same time and dumped her on the deck in front of them. The woman went to Mai and took her hand, while the man spoke to the big man and gave him some money. A couple of men from the Thai couple's ship untied it from the yellow vessel Mai had left, then the engines started and the boat began to leave the harbor. The couple led Mai into a spacious cabin even more luxuriously appointed than the boat she had left. Although she had slept a little the night before, she was still tired from her journey. The man sat down on one of the leather benches as his wife closed the glass door of the cabin. Mai started to sit down on a bench opposite the man when he yelled at her in Phasa Thai, her native language.

"What're you doing?"

"I was going to sit down."

"You will not sit in my presence."

"What do you mean?", asked Mai. The Thai couple on the ship had not said anything to her since her arrival, so this harsh exchange took her by surprise.

Unnoticed, the woman had come up beside her. Suddenly, Mai was rocked by a blow to the face and almost fell. She was able to recover her balance but could not keep a tear from her eye after this unexpected attack. "You will not disrespect my husband," said the woman in a calm voice, as she drifted over to sit next to her husband. Her calm, polite tone and graceful movements clashed with the violence and strength of the attack against Mai.

"My dear, I'm sorry you hurt your hand," he said to her in a caring tone.

"I had to protect you, my husband," she replied. She took his hand.

Mai stood in front of them, shocked by the contrast between their tender exchange and their harsh treatment of her.

The man looked at her again. When he spoke, there was no tenderness in his voice, only anger and irritation.

"Look here. I've spent a lot of money to bring you here. I own you. My wife, Suchan, and my daughters Mali and Phailu are very busy. They do not have time to do whatever needs to be done around the house. Your job will be to cook, clean, work in the yard, and generally keep the house in order. If you have time, you may sleep. However, if you are called, you must come immediately. My wife or daughters, or even I, may need the slight assistance that you can provide, even at night. In return, we will feed and clothe you, and give you a room in which to stay. Everything you have will be mine, however, and I may take it away if you do not earn it by working hard. The authorities will think that you are my daughter. If you run away, they'll bring you back to me, and I will punish you. Also, you have your sister to think about. If you leave us, or displease us with your work, we'll call her owner and she will be put out on the streets, or worse. Now, it's time to get to work. You've already wasted much of our time. Not only did we bring the boat way out here to get you, but we've had to endure your insolence. My name is Kiet Jones, but you can call me "sir" or "Mr. Jones." My wife is "ma'am" or "Mrs. Jones," and my daughters will both be called "Mistress Jones." However, you won't speak to any of us unless you are spoken to. Are you smart enough to understand these simple instructions?"

"Yes sir, I can. I have a question, however. How will I check on my sister's well-being? That was part of the agreement."

"More insolence. I will ensure that your sister is safe, as long as you do as I say. Get to work. We would like a sandwich and a soda. We are hungry."

Mai was hungry herself. She heard the word "sandwich," but it was in the language that she did not know, so she wasn't sure what to do. As she stood there, the man rose from the bench, grabbed her arm, and took her further into the cabin to an area surrounded with shiny metal machines. He released his grip on her arm, opened the door of one of the devices, and removed packaged meat and cheese, then banged them on the counter. He removed a white sauce, a yellow sauce, and opened a loaf of bread. He rapidly put white and yellow sauce on two slices of bread with a knife; put a little meat on it, and some cheese. He took a small napkin from a drawer and set the sandwich on it, then removed a colorful metal can from the device that had held the meat and cheeses, and pulled on a small metal extension, which opened a small door in the top of the soda can with a "pop" noise. Mai had tried to pay attention, but the man had worked so quickly that she didn't quite see everything.

"I've made my own sandwich for the last time. Now, you will make one for my lovely wife. She is very hungry, so you must hurry."

Mai did not like to even handle meat. She had too much respect for the creature that had been killed to eat it. However, she knew that this was a test, and she wanted to pass. So, she tried to do what the man had done. When she opened the soda, some of it sprayed out onto the counter and floor. Her new owners quietly watched her work. When she had finished, she brought the sandwich, napkin, and soda to Mrs. Jones, and handed them to her, then took a step back and stood in silence.

Suchan opened the top slice of bread and looked at the meat and cheese inside. "Look, darling. My can is wet, the mayonnaise and mustard are uneven, and there is no meat or cheese at the edge of the sandwich. Besides, the crust is still on the bread."

Kiet Jones turned to Mai. He slowly rose from the sofa, took her by the arm, and dragged her back to the galley. "Close the refrigerator door, put away the materials, and clean up your mess," he yelled. Frightened, Mai worked as quickly as she could to meet his demands. When everything was put away, he turned a valve on the sink and rinsed the knife they had used, and then put it away. He moved the bread a little, then opened the refrigerator door and moved the contents around, while Mai used some napkins to wipe up the spilled soda. While she was kneeling to clean, he kicked her and sent her sprawling on the floor. "That is for the poor work you did in the kitchen." He kicked her again in the stomach, they again in the back as she doubled over on the floor. "That is for abusing my wife with the horrible sandwich you made, and for covering her hand with spilled soda. Get up off the floor, you lazy, stupid girl," he yelled, pulling her to her feet by her long hair. "You will not lay down on the job here. You must be ready to do your job at all times. I was going to give you some bread, but after your insolence, I cannot bring myself to do it. Stand UP!" he yelled.

Mai brought herself to her feet, and somehow managed to stand. He was a strong man, and he had really hurt her. She was bewildered. How could they beat her for things she did not know? How would she survive?

Mr. Jones went back over to the bench and sat next to his wife. Ignoring the small, wounded girl, he spoke gently. "Obviously, my dear, she is very stupid. I'm so sorry that I have bought such a worthless slave. Would you teach her how to help us? I know it is inconvenient for you. I'll help you discipline her if she continues to fail at her job."

"Yes, my dear. I will do this for you. If she continues to defy me, however, she will need to be reproved again."

"I will take care of her. She won't abuse you any longer."

It was like Mai wasn't even in the room. She wasn't sure what to do with herself. So she stood as still as she could, given the motion of the ship, and tried to hold back the tears. She had already been hit four times, and she hadn't even been with these people for a day. She didn't want to be beaten anymore. She was scared, but tried to hide it.

Mr. and Mrs. Jones switched to another language, and conversed for a while. It was as if Mai was not there. Then, they went out the door, first donning jackets against the chill on the Puget Sound that morning. The man motioned for Mai to follow them, so she did. She had not donned her jacket, and was afraid to stop to get one, so she was cold on the afterdeck of the ship. She followed them as they walked and talked quietly. She shivered in the cold wind. She was glad when they re-entered the cabin. At least she was out of the cold.

Mai stood for about an hour, and then they arrived at their destination. The ship had a couple of crew members, who tied the ship to the pier with heavy ropes, then helped the Joneses onto the dock. Mai followed a couple of paces behind until they got to a huge, black car, as big as any two that she had seen before. The crewman held the back door for Mr. and Mrs. Jones. The woman got in the car, but the man motioned towards the back of the vehicle. The crewman opened a hatch on the back, and Mr. Jones motioned Mai to get in. She didn't want to, but she knew that she had to obey, so she climbed into the trunk of the limousine, and then the crewman closed the trunk over her. He wouldn't look at her, however. It was as if he was ashamed of his role in this drama. The engine started, and the car began to move. Mai was afraid, but she needed some rest. This is the first time she had been off her feet for a while, and she slept.

She awoke to bright light. The trunk of the car had been opened. "Get out and get to work, you lazy girl," hissed Mr. Jones. Mai awoke and climbed out of the trunk as fast as her bruises would allow. She thought he might strike her again, but he left the trunk open and strode rapidly away from the car. Mai hustled after him, finally seeing her surroundings.

They were surrounded by a vast green lawn, edged by tall trees. Ahead of her was a large building, larger than the wat in her village. One of the crewmen from the ship was holding the door of this building open for Mrs. Jones, and she went in. Mai caught up with Mr. Jones as he entered the door. The man holding the door would still not meet her eyes.

Once she entered the house, Mai was overwhelmed. Everywhere were large windows that looked out on the ocean or the lawn, thick carpets and rugs in bright colors, beautiful wood furniture, and colorful paintings on the wall. "Hurry up, you stupid girl," said Mr. Jones. "Stop gawking. You'll have plenty of time to see all these things when you are cleaning them. I've wasted so much time on you today, yet I will take a little more to show you your room, and point out the areas in which you'll work." He led her down a corridor all the way to the end. He opened the door, and there was a room with white walls, a small bed, a dresser, a closet, and a wooden chair. There was a black box with a glass front on a small table in one corner of the room. Through a door was a small bathroom with a glass shower, a sink, and a toilet.

Lying on the bed was a small electronic device. Mr. Jones picked it up and handed it to Mai. "This is your pager. When one of us wants you, it will buzz. This small screen will show the name of the person calling you." Mai took it from him, and put it in her pocket.

"You are so stupid. How will you know who's calling?" Mr. Jones roughly pulled the device from her pocket and clipped it on the waistband of her pants. "Wear it at all times. Now, follow me. Leave your things here. I'll show you the rest of the house, including your tools. Tomorrow, my wife will waste some of her valuable time showing you what you need to do."

He led her throughout the house, introducing her to the two girls on the way. They seemed to be about her age, but did not speak to her. The house had many rooms, lots of bathrooms, a large kitchen, a separate garage with quarters for the driver above it, as well as a shed with tools for working in the yard. From the mistreatment on their boat, Mai knew that she had one chance to learn all these unfamiliar things, so she struggled with all her might to burn this information into her memory. After the tour, Mr. Jones took her to the kitchen. He offered her a slice of bread. When she started to eat it, he slapped her. "Do not eat in my presence. You can have this when I am gone. We will order our meal tonight, so you can leave us. Go to your room, but keep your pager with you. If we need you, we'll call. My wife will train you to cook and clean in the morning."

Back in her room, Mai took a shower, piled her old clothes in a neat pile under the small table, and went to bed. Mercifully, the pager did not buzz during the night, and she was able to sleep. When she awoke, she was agitated and nervous. Clearly, serving the Jones family would be a nearly impossible assignment. Although she had worked hard at home as a girl, and knew how to cook and clean in a near Stone Age environment, she did not know how to use or maintain all the technological devices in this house. After all, she had first encountered electricity in the brothel, and running water on the ship. Here, there were bathrooms, fireplaces, a big tank with fish, a shed full of power tools, and the kitchen, with a variety of high-tech appliances. Not to mention that the Jones family seemed to enjoy American-style food, which she had neither purchased or prepared. She did not want to be beaten again, but she feared she would not be able to learn about all these things in just a day or two.

She did not spend too much time on worry, however. She had always been one to apply her beliefs to distance herself from this inner turmoil, and she resolved to do so now. She would either succeed at this job, or she wouldn't. No amount of worry would enhance her abilities. In fact, worry would probably limit her ability to learn. She thought about all these things as she dressed and got ready for her day. Having put herself in a good frame of mind, she left her room and went towards the kitchen.

Mrs. Jones was already there, using one of the devices. She told Mai that it was a "coffee maker," then showed the girl how to operate it. Mai carefully watched the details of the machine's operation. She knew from the boat that Mrs. Jones would expect Mai's work to be better than her own.

For the rest of the day, Mrs. Jones showed Mai all around the house, telling her what needed to be done in each room, bombarding her with information. The mistresses Jones and Mr. Jones left for school and work, respectively, early in the day. Mai was glad there was less distraction for her as she tried to learn about maintaining this household. By the end of the day, she had a rough idea of where everything was, but still felt unfamiliar with this vast and complex house.

In the evening, she was told what to make for dinner. Of course, she had to overcome her distaste for meat. Furthermore, she wasn't sure what tools to use, or how to heat the oven. There were a few books around the kitchen, but they were written in a language that she didn't understand. She politely asked Mrs. Jones how to prepare the food. Mrs. Jones told her that she had taught her all these things already, and that such a question bordered on insolence. Mai knew this was a code for further punishment, so she left hurriedly, took some things out of the refrigerator, and turned on the stove. As she was searching for a pan, she touched the black glass top of the stove and almost cried out when she burned her hand. She didn't have time to treat the burn, however, so she worked through the pain.

An hour later, she had some food laid out on the dining room table, with an irregular assortment of eating utensils and wine glasses filled with water. The food didn't smell good to her, but she didn't like this kind of food, anyhow. While she had been hard at work, Mr. Jones had arrived home. She went into the living room and, quietly, announced that dinner was ready. The family came in and sat at the table. Mali and Phailu looked at their food with disgust, but didn't say anything. Mr. Jones called Mai, who was standing by the wall of the dining room, over to him. His tone was quiet, so she hoped that she would be safe. He took some of the food from each of the dishes, and put it on his plate, grouped together in the middle. Then he stood, so that he was standing next to Mai. Suddenly, he grabbed the back of her head and shoved it into the middle of the plate. Mai could hardly breathe. She struggled, but he held her face in the food that she had prepared. She heard giggling. How could anyone find humor in her plight?

"We have waited so long for this filth? How could you insult me and my family with this stuff? I know, you are trying to poison us and take our things. Now, I have wasted money on this food, on supporting you to make it, and I am hungry after a long day with nothing to eat. I must order food to be delivered promptly, which will be expensive. You are so stupid and worthless."

He jerked her head out of the plate, then hit her in the stomach and she fell to the floor. He kicked her in anger. "Get up, you worthless girl. While my wife is inconveniencing herself to order replacements for this horrible food, you will clean up this mess and reset the table. Wash your face also, you pig!"

Mai wanted to flee, or just lie still from the pain in her abdomen, but she did not want to be hit again. So she pulled herself to her feet, shuffled over to the sink, and washed her face. Then, she took all the dishes of food off the table, cleaned up the mess on the floor, and replaced any plates that had been used. The family drifted out of the room as she disposed of the food that she had earlier worked so hard to prepare, washed and put away all the dishes, and took the garbage outside. Mr. Jones had warned her to be finished before the takeout food arrived, so she worked as quickly as possible. When the food arrived, she stood against one wall in the room, and was grateful to be ignored. The meal was mostly eaten in silence, with a few words said in the language that she did not understand. It hurt to stand up straight, but she did so out of fear. When the meal was finished, the family left, and she cleaned up a second dinner, including changing the tablecloth. Then, Mr. Jones told her that she could go to her room, and she collapsed on the bed and went to sleep, hoping that the pager would not ring.

The next couple of months were the most difficult of her life. First, she had to learn how to use many devices that she had never seen, with no instruction. She was a quick study, however, and she found that each device that she mastered gave her ideas about the rest. She was struck for something every day, sometimes more than once. However, the discomfort from her bruises eventually became like background noise. She was again regaining control of her fears. She knew what to expect, and, while it was unpleasant, it was the unknown that had most terrified her. She decided to quit crying. She would control herself, and not give them the satisfaction of controlling her emotions through fear and violence. While she worked hard both to learn and to do the cooking, cleaning, and maintenance for this family, she also worked at restoring the inner peace that had characterized her youth. She applied the teachings that she had learned at the wat, especially to resist the feelings of hate and vengeance inspired by the ill treatment that she received. Towards the end of the second month, she had learned to do most of what was expected, and the beatings came less often. Also, she was allowed to eat when she did a good job, which gave her strength to better accomplish her tasks.

When not speaking to her, everyone in the family spoke that strange language. The two daughters did not even speak Thai. Mai resolved that she would learn the language that they spoke as a challenge to herself and a way to survive in this hostile environment.

She established a routine in which her day would begin early, with preparing coffee for the adults in the family. Then, she would cook breakfast and clean up. Mr. Jones would leave for work, and she would clean the bathrooms and bedrooms, straightening everything as she went. Then, she would prepare lunch for Mrs. Jones while the girls were at school and clean common areas of the house. The afternoon was spent outdoors, mowing and trimming and planting, except when she was paged for a drink, a spot clean, or an after-school snack for the girls. She would clean up and prepare dinner before Mr. Jones arrived, then clean up afterwards. Often, she would be sent to her room for the evening, and only summoned for snacks or to clean up. Once the family had gone to bed, she would tidy up the common rooms in silence, then go to sleep herself.

As she was cleaning, one day, she found a box with children's books. When no one was around, she put the box in her room. In the evenings, when she wasn't being paged, she used the books as a tool to start learning this strange language. She started to pay attention to what was said around her, and match up what was said with labels on different things in the children's books. Often, she would prepare certain items for a meal, then listen to how they were described by the family. She started to learn the sounds associated with the different letters. Once she knew that, her learning increased very rapidly. By putting the sounds together, she could learn new words. Once she could read words, the simple books in the box were open to her. Over the next few months, she read all the books in the box. They were rudimentary, but they taught her basic sentence structure and vocabulary.

Next, she started to listen to the family's conversation. Unlike her own family, these people spoke to each other very infrequently. Since the adults still addressed their commands to her in Thai, she thought that they did not want her to learn their other language, English. Thus, she had to make an effort not to respond to any of the conversations that she came to understand. Now that her job did not take her full mental effort, she was able to observe what was going on around her. Mr. Jones seemed to come and go at odd times, not following any daily schedule. Mai had no idea what he did "at the office," and his wife and daughters did not seem to care. Mrs. Jones seemed to spend her time shopping, dressing, exercising, talking on the phone, and just laying around the house. Mai noticed that the elaborate courtesy and affection that the couple showed each other when speaking Thai was not present in their daily lives when speaking English. It was rare to see a kiss on the cheek. Mai's parents had been subtly affectionate with each other, and this had conditioned her expectations. These two were like co-workers who shared the same house.

The girls were left to their own devices. Once, Mali had been beaten for poor grades in school. Otherwise, the girls would stay in their rooms or watch television or play games in an out-of -the way room in the house. Their parents would belittle them if the girls appeared to gain even a little weight, so they did not eat very much, and would exercise daily, when Mrs. Jones was not in the gym area. Since they were almost her same age, and also mistreated in this horrible household, Mai thought that the girls might become her friends. But instead, they seemed to enjoy taking out their frustrations on her, asking her for difficult things, then telling their parents if Mai did not do them. Watching their father abuse Mai for failing to meet their unreasonable demands seemed to entertain them. Mai found that her life was most peaceful when she stayed away from these people, only attending during meals and when paged. Otherwise, she would use her awareness of the patterns of the house to cook and clean in areas in which the family was not present. Soon, she reached the point where she was the only person in the house not seething with unpleasant emotions.

She had discovered that the box with the glass window was called a television, and that she could use it as a window on the world outside the house. Once she had finished the box of children's books, she had taken to getting a book out of the library, rearranging its neighbors to hide its absence, then replacing it when she was done reading. No one else in the house seemed to read this store of books, so she was not caught. Between the books and the television, she learned about her new country, the United States of America, and continued to refine her understanding of English. She did not have opportunity to practice speaking, however, except for whispered parroting of what she heard around the house or on TV.

This world was so different that the one in which she had grown up. There, people had known each other well, had appreciated each other's' strengths, and tolerated or adjusted for each other's foibles. People had few material possessions, and little understanding of the forces outside the village that shaped their individual and collective lives, but had a sense of continuity and peace in their limited world. Here, it seemed, people had access to an almost unlimited amount of information about the world around them. On television, people could learn about current events, history, geography, science, or any other topic of interest. The government's inner workings were constantly on display. Laws were clearly defined and understood by all. Political corruption was prosecuted, not accepted as a way of life. People had to be tried before they were sent to prison. No one could purchase a human being as had happened to Mai and Jaidee, it seemed. If she could only get away from the Jones' house, Mai could make a place for herself in this society.

But, she faced a couple of obstacles. As the policeman who had brought her to the ship in Thailand had told her, she really was in the country illegally. She knew that this would bring her afoul of the laws of the United States, and could lead to her deportation if she was caught. Also, she did not know how Mr. Jones was able to do it, but he would give her pictures of Jaidee from time to time, and remind Mai that her sister's well-being was in her hands. Mai knew that her sister would suffer if she escaped. Besides, now that she had learned how to meet the family's expectations, her lot was not so bad. She had enough food to eat, a warm, clean place to stay, and things to learn and do. Now that she had learned the language, she decided that she would bide her time until she could escape without injuring her sister on the other side of the world. This was a more formidable challenge, and she was not sure how to meet it.

Mai had learned about computers, and the way in which the internet allowed connections throughout the world. She knew, as well, that Mr. Jones supported his family with money earned in the technology field, so she suspected that his computer would have a wealth of information. She would have time to investigate it during the week while Mrs. Jones was out shopping, and everyone else was about their daily chores. But, when she tried to look at it, the first screen asked for a password and she was stuck. She guessed a couple of times, but was not able to discover it. She left the computer how she had found it, and went about her work.

How to get that password? She did not want to start talking to Mr. Jones. In truth, he seemed to enjoy hitting her, so she avoided him as much as possible. It would be suspicious if she suddenly started to ask him questions, and maybe dangerous as well. She would have to find out on her own.

Her work did not take much of her mental energy anymore. Furthermore, since she had to clean and straighten the entire large home, she probably knew more about the things in the house than anybody else. She found a small video camera, with its charger, on a top shelf in a family area. It was a little dusty from disuse. In fact, she had only found it because she was dusting the top shelf for want of anything else to clean in that room. She put the camera in her pocket, and took it back to her room. Like the books, she did not think of this as stealing. After all, she was just moving the things from one part of the house to the other. But, she had come up with a plan to get that password!

In Mr. Jones' office, there was a plant not too far from the computer. Over the next few weeks, Mai gradually moved it into a good position for her plan. She charged the camera battery overnight, then focused it at the proper distance and hid it in the plant.

The next day, she eagerly awaited everyone's departure, and then collected the camera. She played back the video, only to find that it ended before Mr. Jones used the computer. Also, the picture had been quite dark. That evening, she worked with the controls on the camera until she was able to erase everything on the hard drive, and set the resolution lower so that it would run for a longer time. She decided to open the blinds in that room as part of her cleaning process, to get a little more light in the picture. Having made her adjustments, she was hopeful that she would get the needed password the next day.

The challenge for Mai was remaining "blank" for the family. When she feared further beating, it was easy to try to make herself unnoticed. While she knew that the potential for further violence remained, the family seemed to be getting used to her presence in the house, and expecting all the housework to be handled. As a result, things had reached a state of detente. They would ignore her, and she would work inconspicuously. Her training in detachment as a younger girl had served her well as she was trying to deal with the fear and suffering of her first few weeks with the Jones family. Now that she had a plan to better her situation, she had to hide that excitement. So, she went about her work as diligently as ever, hoping that the next day would be a turning point.

When everyone left, she waited and cleaned for a while, working her way across the house to the study. There, she retrieved the camera and played back the recording. It looked like she had gotten what she wanted, but the screen was so small that she couldn't see which specific keys had been pressed, and in what order. She needed a larger screen. She hid the camera in her room, again, and went about her duties, trying to think of how to play the video on one of the large televisions in the house.

When she was dusting in the family room, she had an idea. She noticed that the cables on the back of the TV were red, white, and yellow, like the receptacles on the camera. Perhaps she could plug the camera into those cables! She decided to give it a try the next day.

When everyone left the next morning, she waited half an hour, and then tried out her plan. Sure enough, the cable fit. She started the camera's playback function, and then pushed buttons on the TV until the picture on the big screen was the same as the one on the camera. Hurriedly, she sped through the video until she got to the part where Mr. Jones was typing. She wrote down all the keystrokes, going back and forth over the tape until she was sure she had everything. She realized that she had spent almost an hour on her search, and felt panicked. What if someone came home and found her watching the television? She shuddered with fear. Hurriedly, she hid both the paper on which she had written the password and the camera, and then got back to work. A few minutes later, Mrs. Jones came back from whatever inconsequential thing she had been doing, and Mai was glad indeed that she was working. Not sure that she would be able to maintain her "blank" facade, she went outside and did some work in the yard for a while before preparing lunch for Mrs. Jones. By then, she was able to collect herself and get back to work. She would wait for an opportune time before trying the password.

Now that she wanted time alone, it seemed that everyone's schedule was keeping them home. Mr. Jones had been working from home more often over the last couple of weeks, the girls had some time out of school, and Mrs. Jones hadn't been doing as much shopping or visiting. Mai tried to disguise her impatience. She wanted to find out what was going on with Jaidee! But she knew that she would need a lot of time to figure out how the computer worked. She would watch over the girls' shoulders sometimes, to see how the controls worked, and what the computer screens looked like. She had seen people using computers on television a few times, as well, and had an idea of what to do. However, she would have to learn as she went. If only the family would get out of the house for a while.

She got her wish a couple of weeks later. It was spring break at the girls' school, and the family decided to go on vacation to Mexico. Before the family left, Mr. Jones reminded her that her sister would suffer if Mai ran away or messed things up around the house. He also told her that she should remember that she was in the country illegally, and, if the authorities found out about her, they would send her back to Thailand, and her sister would be punished. Mai told him that she understood, and that she would do her duty. With that, the family got in the waiting limousine and, presumably, left for the airport. Mai wanted to get to work on the computer, but she wanted to be sure that they were gone, so she worked around the house for a full hour before venturing into the study.

Since they hadn't come back, she decided that she was probably safe to get started. She retrieved the paper on which she had written the keystrokes, and sat down at the computer. She turned on the screen, and found the power button for the machine. Before long, she saw the screen that had defeated her before, and she tried her password. After a couple of tries, she was able to get past the password and into the actual computer.

For the rest of the week, she split her time about half and half between working on the computer and working around the house. With no one to make a mess, it was easy to get the place spotless, and keep it that way. The gardening still needed to be done, but she had gone things to the point at which she only had to do maintenance, not extensive pruning, edging, and weeding like she had done when she first started. If she did say so herself, the house was looking better than ever.

Once she had access to the computer, she began to discover things by trial and error. She started by clicking on all the icons on the desktop, and discovered all kinds of documents related to Mr. Jones' work, which were meaningless to her. She also found a financial program, and was amazed at the family's wealth. They seemed to have millions of dollars in the bank. She didn't know that anyone had that much money. None of this was relevant to her search, however, so she kept looking. She found a list of programs, and started each one of those. She found computer games and programs for various kinds of office work, even specialized technical computer programs that she didn't understand at all. But she kept looking.

She found a button that enabled her to search the computer. She searched for "Jaidee", but didn't find anything. She searched for "sister", still nothing. Finally, she searched for "girl", and found quite a few files. Some were family pictures of Mali and Phailu. When she clicked on other ones, however, they were explicit photos of naked young women. Mai closed them quickly, disgusted. She noticed that those kinds of photos had a specific type of label, and decided to avoid all those files. Hopefully, the information about Jaidee was somewhere else.

She discovered the internet after a couple of days, and started clicking on various tabs on that screen. Eventually, she found a favorite link to "Thai girl" that linked to a videoconferencing function with Thailand, but not before she had found links to several porn sites. Fortunately, when she opened the browser window, it was the middle of the night in Thailand, and no one answered. She hurriedly closed the window, glad that she had not been caught. She had to find the history of the calls with her sister. Now that she knew the name of the video service, she was able to search for it, and she found archived files on the computer. It was so good to see her sister again! Jaidee seemed to be in good health, and there were no marks on her face. Mai was glad that her sister seemed to be safe. She would have to find a way to communicate with Jaidee, but was not sure how to go about it. Until then, she was going to stay away from the computer. All the pornographic material that she had found was disgusting to her, and getting physically distant from the computer helped her to feel clean again after mistakenly viewing those images. They did serve to remind her of what she and her sister had escaped. While her enslavement with the Jones family was very unpleasant, it was preferable to the brothel. She spent the last part of the week working on her reading, trying to improve her English. She had found a dictionary and a thesaurus, and had borrowed them for the week. When she ran into a word with which she wasn't familiar, one of the two would usually help her to understand it.

The week went by too quickly, and the Jones family was back on Sunday. Although the house was as clean as it had ever been, no one mentioned it. Mrs. Jones made an offhand comment that Mai had probably been lazy the week that they were gone, but no one else seemed to care, one way or the other. Mai did her best to become part of the background again, and get back up to speed with the extra amount of cleaning and cooking necessary when all four members of the family were back home.

Mai thought about it for a few weeks, developing a plan to contact Jaidee. At least, she could examine the history of calls more closely, and see if she could get any ideas. But, when she tried her password, it didn't work anymore. Mai knew that Mr. Jones worked with computers and programming in his business, so she guessed that he had changed his password as a security precaution. She had taken to leaving the blinds open in that room all the time, so all she had to do was set up the camera again and record the keystrokes. Within the next couple of days, she was back in business, and she browsed the call history with Thailand. However, she didn't come up with any ideas.

She tried for a couple of days to find something, but had no success. So, she decided to forget about the computer and focus on doing her job and learning English. She wished that she had more opportunity to practice speaking, but she was afraid to call attention to herself. She listened more carefully than ever, learning to follow the conversations on television and around the house.

Once she could more fully understand English, she discovered that she wasn't the only one who felt nervous in the Jones household. The girls would talk freely around her, confident that she could not understand them, and then fall silent if their mother or, especially, their father would walk by. With the parents, there was none of the elaborate kindness to each other they had used while speaking Thai. Instead, they were like strangers in the same house. They rarely spoke to each other, and never really spent any time together. It was like a hotel, with Mai as the maid and everyone else like unrelated, extended stay residents. How different from the village life that Mai had known. Although everyone was in everyone else's business as Mai was growing up, that level of concern for each other seemed, to her, preferable to this apathy. Mai was grateful for a childhood surrounding by caring adults, and pitied the Jones girls their wealthy, but loveless, existence.

About six months later, Mai wanted to check on Jaidee again. She assumed that the password had changed, so she taped the keystrokes and captured the password again. She was pleased to find that Jaidee looked healthy, although a little thin, in the pictures that she saw. She wished that she could be with her sister and help her, but Mai pictured each task that she did, during the day, as a way of taking care of her sister. This gave some meaning to her servitude.

Mai had learned that almost everything that a person would want to know could be found, somewhere, on the internet. Perhaps she could find a way to contact her sister. She logged on the next day at her usual time, and was looking for ideas when she heard the front door open and close. Panicked, she logged out of the computer as fast as she could, but when she turned around, Mr. Jones was standing in the doorway, looking at her with an evil smile.

Mai didn't know what to do. She knew she would be in trouble, and braced herself for a blow.

"You little bitch, do you think I'm stupid?" asked Mr. Jones, in a surprisingly calm voice. He came slowly towards her, keeping his body between her and the door. "Didn't you know I would find out that you were spying on my computer? You know that I own a software company. I'm not sure how a dumb girl like you has kept breaking my password, but I'm glad that you did."

Mai was surprised. Why would he want her to look at his computer?

"Mrs. Jones is frigid. I have been paying for sex for many years. I saw that you've been looking at my pictures on the computer. Well, you don't have to look any more."

Mai wasn't sure what this had to do with her using his computer, but he suddenly grabbed her by her arm and her hair and dragged her out of the room. He threw her on the sofa, and grabbed one of her breasts, pinning her down with the other hand on her throat. Now she knew what he had in mind, but, when she struggled, he crushed her throat, making it hard to breathe. He hit her in the side of the head, stunning her, and then ripped off her pants. When he unzipped his, she tried to get away, but he grabbed her and threw her back down onto the floor. As he raped her, she tried to scratch his face, but he just hit her until she stopped. When he was done, he stood up. "Clean up this mess, you stupid bitch, and get dressed. I'm glad I found another use for you. You're really going to save me some money." He slapped her one more time. "If you tell anyone about this, I will kill you. No one will care, either, "he said, in a matter-of-fact tone. Then, he left the room.

Mai struggled to her feet. She was bleeding, and felt woozy from the beating. As she put her pants on hurriedly, she tried to straighten up the area, and then hurried to her room. She locked the door and got into the shower, trying to wash away the dirt she felt inside herself. She was in the shower until the hot water ran out. Then, she got dressed. She wasn't sure what to do. She was afraid to leave the room, but knew that she had to resume her duties, or face more beating. She looked in the mirror, and saw that her face was already swelling and bruised. She dressed and left the room, since it was time to make lunch.

Mrs. Jones arrived a little later, and she and Mr. Jones came to the table for lunch. Mai served them, fearful all the time. But Mr. Jones had gone back to ignoring her, just as he had before. It was like the rape had never happened. Mai tried to be even less obtrusive as they ate their meal in the usual silence. When they left, she cleaned up the dishes and the table, and then went back to her usual schedule of tasks. She was aching all over, and she knew that she was working more slowly than usual. She did as much as she could, stifling any groans she wanted to make for fear of calling attention to herself.

That night, she locked the door to her bedroom, and she had an exceptionally hard time falling asleep. Finally, the pain, fear, and fatigue of the day caused her to fall into a restless sleep.

The next day, she resolved never again to be alone with Mr. Jones. She tried to be outside or at the other end of the house when he was around. She was thankful for his wife and daughters, since she hoped that he would not molest her with them around. After a few days, she convinced herself that he had been angry about the computer, and that it would not happen again. "After all," she told herself, "they need me. None of them do any work. The place would fall apart if something happened to me."

Two nights later, she was awakened by a sound at her door. She sat up in bed, then saw Mr. Jones silhouetted against the light in the hallway, his keys in his hand. She cried out, unconsciously, in fear, but he rapidly crossed the room and covered her mouth with his hand. He pinned her down and raped her again, then left without a word, locking the door behind him.

Mai cried herself to sleep that night. "If only I'd left the computer alone," she thought. The next morning, however, she realized that she was allowing him to victimize her twice, if she accepted the blame for his evil actions. She reminded herself that he, not she, was to blame for this abuse. But she was not sure what to do next. She knew that she would try to endure whatever beating the Jones family could deliver, in order to protect her sister. But she wasn't sure if she could stand this. Obviously, he was going to rape her again. She had not escaped the brothel after all. But, if she ran away, her sister might be subject to even worse abuse. She would have to endure.

Before these attacks, Mai had reached a state of tranquility in the Jones household. As a girl, she had worked hard every day to help her family. Comparatively, the work here was not so bad. She had learned to use the high tech devices at her disposal, and to perform all the household tasks to the Jones family standards, such that she was rarely struck. By blending in to the background, she was able to live, mostly, a peaceful existence, in a fairly comfortable environment. It was not the life she would have chosen, but she could take the good with the bad and maintain the equanimity that she had learned as a child in the temple. Now, she was afraid every day, and couldn't sleep at night. She had seen how much Mr. Jones had enjoyed beating her, so she had little doubt that he would kill her. He was right, also, that no one knew or cared where she was. A few days later, he had attacked her again during the day when the rest of the household was out. She couldn't take it anymore. When he left the room, she put her clothes on and left the house as quickly as she could. She started walking down the street. She thought that she saw one of the blinds in the front of the house move, and she feared that he would follow her, so she picked up her pace. But there was no pursuit, so she breathed a sigh of relief.

She wasn't thinking very clearly. She had never been in the neighborhood, and she was hurt and afraid, so she didn't think about where she was until she heard the brakes of a car squeal, and she saw that she was standing in front of a police car in the middle of the street. The officer driving the car looked angry, so she started to run away, but he told her to stop over the car's loudspeaker. He got out of the car with his hand on his gun, and asked her for her identification. When she didn't have any, he told her to get in the back of the car, in a no-nonsense tone. Now she was worried. It was just as Mr. Jones had said. She was in the country illegally, and she would be deported. Her sister would be put out on the streets, or worse. What had she been thinking?

The officer took her to a holding cell. She told them her name in broken English. When they couldn't find her in the database, they asked if she wanted to call anyone. She didn't have anyone to call, so they put her in a cell and locked the door. Mai just sat there. It seemed her predicament was getting worse and worse, and she didn't know what to do about it. Finally, exhausted and at her wits end, she went to sleep. At least she was safe, by herself in the cell.

She was awakened, she didn't know how much later, by voices in the corridor.

"I'm so glad you found her. You know how kids are. We fought over her allowance, and she ran away. I didn't think she'd get too far, but her mom and I were very worried. Thanks for finding her. I'll pay her bail and bring her home."

"You should see about getting her some identification, sir. She could have found herself in serious trouble with homeland security if you didn't come get her."

"You're right. She's kind of lazy, or else she would have her driver's license. I guess I need to make her take the test. She's not too bright, so I think she's afraid she'll fail."

"Well, I'll bet she's a little shaken up. But we've taken good care of her. Here she is, now."

The cell door opened, and there was Mr. Jones with a police officer. Mai's face fell. She had been caught, just like he predicted. He smiled like he was really happy to see her, and took her hand. She wanted to pull away, but he had a good grip. "Thanks again, officer. We're so glad to have her back."

He marched her along outside, to the waiting car. He put her in the seat and locked the door, then quickly went around to the driver's side and they drove off. "Well, I decided not to call about your sister, so your shenanigans will not hurt her, yet. But I have to punish you."

Mai shuddered in fear, but didn't say anything. She didn't want to give him the satisfaction.

"I'm not going to go easy on you. You didn't want to work anymore, anyhow, so you can take a few days off," he said, with his evil grin. She wanted to run, but she knew she would be recaptured. On the drive back to the house, she tried to avoid thinking about what might happen next, but frightful images played out in her mind.

At the house, he parked the car in the garage, closed garage door, and came around to her side of the car. He opened the door, and jerked her from the car with a strong grip on her upper arm. She was resigned, and didn't resist. He led her through the house to the living room, where the rest of the family was waiting.

"Well, I found her. After all that we have done for her, letting her live in our house and eat our food, this is the thanks that we get. We knew she was lazy. Well, I told her I would punish her. As you girls know, when you break the rules, you have to be punished."

Mai was surprised that no one raised an objection. She worked hard every day, was polite, and did exactly what she was told. She thought that might count for something. In the back of her mind, she had thought that the girls' presence would mitigate his anger. But she saw that he was going to use this beating to keep them in fear of him, as well.

It was much worse than usual. He held her arm with his left hand and hit her in the face with his right a couple of times. Her nose started to bleed and her lip was split. He let her fall to the floor, and then he started to kick her. No matter which way she tried to turn, there was his shoe. Finally, she lapsed into merciful unconsciousness.

When she came to, she was lying on the carpet where he had left her. She could barely move. She got up on her hands and knees and crawled away slowly. She hoped that no one saw her moving like a wounded animal, but it was all she could do. Finally, she made it to her room, locked the door, and went back to sleep.

Mai was left alone the next day. When she was able to take a warm shower, she found that most of her body was covered in purple and yellow bruises. She had a hard time standing upright. She didn't dare leave her room for food, so she drank some water and tried to sleep. It was hard to find a position in which she could lay so that her bruises didn't keep her awake. She was able to doze fitfully, which gave her some relief. Also, she had a supply of Ibuprofen, and it helped a little.

The second day, she could stand up and move a little. She was starting to get very hungry. She had gone without eating many times as a girl, but she had gotten used to regular meals at the Jones house. That was the irony of her situation. She had all that she needed to live, for the first time in her life. People from her village would find her room, combined with the amenities that she shared with the family, palatial and unbelievable. They would probably envy her surroundings. Even with the work that she was forced to do; she probably would find people who would want her life. Yet, she realized that she had lost so much, as well. As a slave, she had no control over herself. Mr. Jones used her at his whim, and she could not resist. She could not plan a future, as she had no control over what would happen. There was none of the community that had characterized her life as a child. She was alone, except for her fears about her sister. In short, she had all she needed to live, but no real desire to do so. She had discovered the consequences of escape. Maybe, if she was overtaken by the despair of her current situation, she would escape again, and he would kill her. Mai felt trapped between despair for herself and fear for her sister. She had forced herself to keep going, but didn't know how much longer she could do so.

The third day after the beating, Mr. Jones unlocked the door and came into the room. Mai was past cowering. Nothing she could say or do affected this monster. It seemed to be day, however, and he did not come over to her.

"Get out of bed. I gave you two days off, even though my family has had to work hard while you were gone. I should've made you work. After all, it's your fault that you had to be punished. I told you ahead of time that you would be captured. Really, I did you a favor. If you had been deported, your sister would have suffered. You don't have to thank me, however. But I want you to get dressed right now and get to work. I don't think you can take too much more discipline, but you are close to earning it." He turned on his heel and left, with the door wide open. Mai waited, to be sure that he was gone, then closed the door without latching it, in case that would incite his anger, and got dressed as quickly as possible.

When she got to the kitchen, she found that it was time to start breakfast. She had lost track of time over the last couple of days. She was moving more slowly than usual, and each time she moved her body hurt. Also, while she had gotten over her repulsion towards preparing meat, today the smell made her sick to her stomach. She had to suppress the desire to vomit. She knew that Mr. Jones was right about her ability to absorb more abuse. If she were beaten further right away, she would be on a descending spiral of beatings for non-performance that brought more beatings, which she had barely survived at the beginning of her captivity. She forced herself to move quickly, watching the clock and preparing the family's meal on time. As if she had not seen the beating, Mrs. Jones accused her of looking "uglier than usual," implying that the bruises and swelling on her face were somehow Mai's fault. It was not unusual for her to insult Mai without reason. This was part of her usual barrage of verbal attacks. Mai was usually able to deflect them by ignoring those comments, but she found them cutting today because she was still weak from the beating. Mai quietly attended the family's meal, not speaking and only moving if motioned for, and then went on with her duties of cleaning and straightening after the family members left. The house was in disarray, as no actual work had been done, regardless of what Mr. Jones had said. She contrasted the mess of the last two days with the week in which she had lived by herself. It seemed that the Jones' were trying to make things harder for her. She felt herself descending in a spiral of self-pity, and forced herself to think about only the tasks before her, clearing her mind of her fears.

As the week went by, the soreness in her limbs left her, but she still felt nauseated. She hoped her battered appearance would keep Mr. Jones away, but he molested her again within a few days. After that, she was back in the nightmare. Only her love for her sister gave her strength to go on.

A couple of weeks later, she missed her monthly period. This had not happened before. Maybe it was a consequence of the beating. Certainly, she had been kicked in the stomach a few times. She had become more of a machine than a human, going through the motions of her duties without any emotional engagement. In her despair, she noted this irregularity but didn't really care.

A few weeks later, Mr. Jones called her a "fat bitch" and slapped her in the face after raping her. She had always been very thin, from working hard and eating little. When her stomach started to bulge a little, it was noticeable. This also gave Mrs. Jones ammunition for her offhand insults, and she made cutting comments about Mai's changed physique.

Mai missed her period again, and a beam of clarity cut through the fog of her existence. Living in such close quarters as a child, she had seen all the stages of pregnancy. She was going to have a baby. At first, she felt ambivalent, knowing that the child was the descendant of the evil Mr. Jones. But then, she realized that this new person depended on her. Now, she had a new reason to survive, her baby.

The Jones family took another month to realize what was going on. Mrs. Jones took to calling her "the slut," alleging that she had been carrying on with men who came to the house for repairs, or deliver new purchases. Even she didn't seem entirely convinced by this story, however. Mr. Jones knew exactly what was going on. He told her that he knew a doctor who would "get rid of the little bastard." Obviously, he had dealt with this situation before. Mai had learned about medical abortion from television, something that was unheard of in her village. While she had found the strength to endure his abuse for the sake of her sister, she knew this was the limit. She had to protect her baby. She had learned from her first escape experience. She would have to blend in with the surrounding culture. Fortunately, Mr. Jones seemed to think that she had been broken, and no effort was made to keep her locked in the house. He must have thought that she would find his baby as distasteful as he did. Perhaps he thought that he was doing her a favor.

Mai knew that the doctor appointment was on Friday. But, once she had decided to leave, she took action the next day. Mr. Jones left for work, the girls went to school and, after a seemingly interminable workout and shower, Mrs. Jones left to shop or whatever she did. Mai watched her car leave the driveway, then went to Phailu's room and looked in the closet. The girl was a little larger than Mai, and she had some sweats that she sometimes wore around the house. Mai had never taken anything before, but she wanted clothes worn by an American. She did not want the police to notice her and return her to this house. She dressed quickly and took a warm jacket and a few of Mrs. Jones' energy bars and left the house. Considering how imprisoned she felt, it was amazing how easy it was to just leave. She walked down the long driveway and out onto the road. No more running down the street like a fool. Although she didn't know where she was going, she decided to pretend that she did. She took a right out of the driveway and walked south along the road. She would just follow her instincts and get as far from this place as possible. As she walked, it started to rain. She put up the hood on her sweatshirt and kept on going. She didn't know where she would wind up, or how she would take care of herself and her baby, but she knew she wanted to get as far from the Jones family as her feet would take her.

BACK TO AMY

Amy had continued to attend her parish in Ballard with her friend, Dawn, even after she and Ed had moved to Beacon Hill. This morning, the sermon had been about Matthew 25, the primacy of each person's duty to the less fortunate. Amy realized that she could, and should, do more for her fellow human being. After the wedding, she and Ed had continued to develop their lifestyle of ethically drive minimal consumption. By sharing living expenses, and by continually redefining what they regarded as a "need," their living expenses were quite low. She was pleased to join Ed in supporting his parents, but even with that regular expenditure, they had saved quite a bit of money. Ed already was focused on helping the poor. It was one of the five pillars of his faith. Amy liked to contribute to worthy causes from time to time, but she realized that, except for Jada, she had done very little in person to help needy individuals. While thinking about these things, she came to a traffic light that was backed up, and decided to take a short cut on a side street. She knew the area well, and wouldn't get lost.

Up ahead, she saw what looked like a pre-teen boy walking in the rain. His gray sweats looked too large for him, and he was soaked from his hood to his feet. Amy had never picked anyone up from the side of the road, out of concern for her personal safety. But this person looked so forlorn that she couldn't just pass by. This individual in need somehow called her to action. Would she follow her desire to help, or give in to fear?

She kept driving until she was able to take a right on a street behind the boy, then she hurriedly parked her car and walked after him. He wasn't going that fast, so it was simple to catch up. Amy didn't know what to say, so she asked. "Can I help you?" They person in the gray sweatshirt turned around, and Amy was surprised to see that she was a young, pregnant Asian girl. She looked frightened, and she didn't immediately reply. Amy wasn't sure what to do next.

Mai heard the voice behind her and turned. She was angry at herself for letting someone sneak up on her, and fearful of what might happen next. She did not want to be returned to the Jones'. She saw a woman in her thirties; probably the first American she had seen wearing what seemed to be homemade clothes. The woman's hair was wet from the rain, and she had stopped and was looking at Mai. Mai's first instinct was to run, but this woman did not appear threatening, and she had offered to help. Fearing for her baby's life, Mai had not had time to plan for her escape. She really did need help. She knew it wouldn't be safe for her to stay outside in a strange country without food or warm clothing. Also, she could not turn to the authorities for help. They would either deport her or return her to her owners. The woman's offer seemed too good to be true. But, unlike the men who had come to her village so long ago, this woman seemed trustworthy. For her baby and herself, Mai had to take a chance on this stranger's kindness. "Yes," she replied, in her accented English, "I do need help. I don't have any place to stay."

Amy's heart went out to this girl, and she hugged her. The girl tensed up at first, then relaxed. She felt small inside those large, wet clothes. Amy was glad for this opportunity to help this homeless, pregnant girl.

"My name is Amy, what's yours?"

"Mai."

"I'd like to help you. Let's get you to my car, where you can warm up. I'll take you to my house, and we'll get you some food, if you like, and some dry clothes."

"Thank you very much. I'd appreciate that."

They drove to the house in relative silence, since Mai was nervous, and Amy didn't know quite what to say. "Here we are," said Amy brightly, as they parked the car in the garage. Mai got out of the car and stayed close to Amy, especially when Ed came to greet them.

Ed kissed Amy in greeting, and then asked, "Hi, honey. Who's your friend?"

"We just met. She needs some help, and I offered to take care of her. She needs a shower, some clothes, and some food. I was going to set her up in the room we're saving for your parents, if that's OK with you. I'll show her where things are. Can you cook some food?"

"Certainly I will. I'm glad we can use the extra space to help someone. Come on upstairs when you're done and I'll have something waiting."

Ed noticed that Mai seemed to be hiding behind Amy, so he didn't move forward to greet her, but smiled and headed up the stairs to the kitchen. Amy led Mai to the unused guest bedroom and bathroom, and then went to get some of her own clothes and toiletries for the girl to use.

Mai was questioning the wisdom of her decision. Here she was, caught in this home with this couple. She was afraid that they would abuse her again, and part of her wanted to run away. No one had helped her since she was taken from her home, and she suspected this would be another prison. But they had not yet mistreated her, and she noticed that her room was on the ground floor with an apparently functioning window, a route of escape if necessary. Almost instinctively, she wanted to flee again, but she knew that the needed food, shelter, and protection from people who would do her harm, for her baby and herself. These people had been gracious so far, so she decided to stay.

While Mai was showering and dressing in Amy's outfit, Amy went to talk to her husband. They had talked about helping others more concretely in general terms, but this was a big commitment that she wasn't sure that Ed would want to make. After all, this stranger was coming into their home. Who knows what kind of person she was? Maybe she would rob them or worse. Amy sensed gentleness in her, however, and felt surprisingly safe. Ed was making a stir fry with veggies and noodles as she got into the kitchen. Amy explained the circumstances under which she had found Mai, and her desire to take her in. Ed wanted to be sure that she didn't have anyone looking for her. After all, she could have just run away from home. Amy believed her story that she was homeless and without anyone. Ed was happy to share their home with her, again showing the compassion that had drawn Amy to him in the first place. Agreeing in principle to keep the girl as a boarder, at least until she could go home, Amy went to get her. They agreed that she seemed frightened of Ed, so Amy would take care of her, until she and Ed could establish a rapport.

Amy knocked on the bedroom door, and Mai invited her in. She was dressed in one of Amy's smaller outfits, which was too big for her, and she was dry and clean. Amy gestured for Mai to follow her. "Come on up for some lunch. My husband Ed has made a stir fry with vegetables, if you'd like that."

"That sounds great. Thanks so much for your help. I wasn't sure what I was going to do."

Ed greeted his wife with a hug and a kiss, and then they sat down for a meal. Amy offered a blessing, and then they ate. They were both surprised by how much food and water the diminutive Mai was able to consume. After they had eaten, Amy cleared the table, and then they sat and talked. Amy related the tale of how she had found Mai. For the girl's benefit, she asked Ed about her plan to take her in until she could get on her feet, and Ed agreed. During this initial discourse, Mai had been scrutinizing Ed. She did not sense the anger and lust that had seemed to boil inside of Mr. Jones. In fact, this couple reminded her of her parents, at ease in each other's company. She told them that she had been brought to the country illegally from Thailand against her will. Leaving out the details of her captivity, she told them that she had escaped and had no place to go, and no family to help her. Amy though that Jada or one of her lawyer friends might be able to help them, and made a mental note to pursue that avenue of inquiry. They asked her about schooling or job training, and realized that she had neither. Ed complimented her on her command of English and her quick wit. Mai replied with a demure thanks.

They decided that Amy and Mai would go shopping for some outfits and personal care items. They would go to a couple of garage sales for outfits, and to the grocery store for personal items. Amy and Ed went to the store so infrequently that it was almost an outing. Amy replaced the sheets and blankets on the guest bed while Ed made sure that the heater vents were open and that the lights and bathroom fixtures were working. They hadn't used that part of the house since they had moved in, so they opened the windows to air it out a little. Mai had insisted on donating her old clothes to a charity, without explanation. Ed and Amy agreed, and set them aside in a paper bag. They spent the rest of the day getting her settled, and then went to bed early to get ready for work the next day. Mai could hardly sleep. Despite her observations to the contrary, she was afraid that Ed might assault her. Of course, she was left alone until morning. Amy knocked on her door and told her that she and Ed were going to work, but Mai was welcome to use what she would like around the house. After they left, Mai made sure that the doors were locked and went to sleep.

Mai felt lucky to have found such nice people with which to live. When she awoke, she ate some food in keeping with her lifelong vegan diet, and then wandered around the house, exploring her new environment. The house was not nearly as large, new, or well-appointed as the one she had escaped. In fact, it seemed almost shabby. Also, she had become an expert on cleanliness, and felt that the housekeeping left something to be desired. As she drifted from room to room, she cleaned and straightened a little, more out of habit than anything else. She turned on the television, and watched some mindless programming. At lunch time, she made herself some food, and then cleaned up the whole kitchen. She wasn't sure what to do with herself, having so much free time. Another habit from her captivity came to the fore, and she found a book and started to read. The day passed slowly. She wondered what would happen when Ed and Amy got home from work. They had been so nice to her. Because of her experiences, this made her suspicious. She was waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop. She did her best to calm her fears and be at peace.

When Amy and Ed arrived home, they were not sure what they would find, if anything. After all, they had left it in the care of a person they had known for less than twenty-four hours. Upon their arrival, however, the house appeared to be unchanged, at least when viewed from the street. When they parked their car in the garage and went up the stairs, they saw that nothing appeared to be missing, and they were greeted by the smells of a hot dinner. They enjoyed the tasty meal that Mai had prepared, and thanked her for her work. Ed and Amy talked a little about what they had done that day. They noted that Mai had cleaned the kitchen, and thanked her for her efforts. Amy took her around the house, showing her where things were located. She told Mai that she was welcome to use anything in the house. They set up an account for her on the computer, so that she could use the Internet. Ed had washed the dishes when they finished, and he was sitting in the living room, reading a book, with the gas fireplace running. He looked up to acknowledge their presence, and then went back to his book. Mai sat with them in the living room for a while, and then went to her own room downstairs, even more thankful that she had found such a pleasant place to stay. After she had left, Ed and Amy cuddled on the sofa for a while. It seemed that Mai was no danger to them. They agreed to let her stay with them. They wanted to get some well-baby medical care for her, but knew that she wouldn't be covered under their health insurance at the laboratory. They talked a little more about their own life together, and then went to bed. Both felt that the day had gone about as well as possible.

The first week that Mai had joined their household, tension was much higher than usual. Mai had asked for, and was given, a key to the house. During the day, Amy and Ed weren't quite sure what she did with her time, other than clean. The house was spotless in no time, and they both went out of their way to thank her for taking on the cleaning and cooking, at which she was clearly expert. They didn't find anything missing, or any evidence of unexpected visitors, so they made every effort to be cheerful and pleasant around her. In return, she was mostly silent. She didn't really participate in the discussions they shared over the dinners that she had made, but she was always eager to help with projects around the house. She seemed to go out of her way to maintain as much distance as possible from Ed. Although her obvious fear of him hurt his feelings a little, he did his best to maintain a friendly demeanor towards the girl.

Saturday, when Ed went to his services, Amy invited Mai to go shopping together. Mai didn't seem as enthusiastic as Amy had expected. After all, she had been cooped up in the house all week. But she did agree to go, so they went to a couple of Amy's favorite open-air markets, at which people were selling homemade goods. Amy was known to many of the vendors, who greeted her warmly. Amy offered to buy Mai some new clothing in her size, so they picked out several outfits and two pair of shoes. Amy paid for their purchases, and then they sat down and ate a homemade lunch purchased from a different vendor at the market. Mai was surprised that Amy spent so much money on her without complaint or request. This seemingly unlimited kindness and generosity was something she had never experienced in her life. Since she was sold into slavery, everything that she had obtained had been at a very high price, paid in labor or suffering. But this couple had let her come and go as she pleased; they had not molested her in any way, and had showered her with gifts. They were very appreciative of her efforts to help around the house, and had adapted to her vegan diet. On the way home, Mai was mostly quiet, thinking about her hosts and their graciousness towards her. She noticed that they passed a shopping mall on the way home, which seemed more conveniently located, with a greater assortment of goods. After again expressing her thanks for the new clothing, Mai asked Amy why they had not gone shopping at the mall.

Amy told her about Ed's experiences in the Indonesian factory, and their resolve to apply the Golden Rule to shopping. They had decided to value the items that they purchased by what she and Ed would want to make if they were selling them. Furthermore, they always tried to purchase items directly from the craftsperson who made them, so that all the proceeds went to the one who made the goods. She explained that they felt it was unjust that often the retailers, importers, and transporters of goods made so much money, while the person who worked to create it made so little. By buying direct from the person who made the goods, they did a little to eliminate this injustice. Mai suddenly realized why Amy appeared unfashionable, and mentally reproved herself for her rash judgment of her hostess. She realized again how fortunate she was to have met these kind people. Seeing Amy's compassion, she decided to tell her all that had happened to her in her life.

Amy was moved to tears by the struggles and abuse this young woman had experienced in her short life. While she had been jarred by the grinding poverty of Ed's parents, she hadn't even imagined that people were still being enslaved and abused in the present day. Amy had found herself driving around in circles, in order to give Mai time to finish her story before they got home. By the time they pulled in the garage, both women were in tears. Amy opened Mai's door in the garage, and the two women hugged fiercely, as Amy tried to comfort and care for this abused girl. Now she could understand why Mai was so wary around Ed. Amy asked Mai to tell Ed her story, as well, but Mai couldn't bring herself to do it. She did give Amy permission to share her story with Ed, however. They sat in Mai's room for a while, sharing the mutual comfort of each other's company. Mai had never told another person her life story before, and she felt like a dam had broken in her heart. The fear that had distanced her from Amy the last week evaporated. She basked in the compassion she felt from Amy, weeping tears of joy. "This is what home feels like," she thought to herself, as she hugged Amy again. Amy was glad that she had overcome her fears and invited Mai to stay with them. They put Mai's new clothing away together, and then Amy told her she would go talk to Ed, and Mai agreed.

Ed had heard the car in the garage quite a while ago, and wondered why Amy hadn't come upstairs yet. When she finally did appear, he could tell she had been crying, and he went swiftly to his wife, worried that their boarder was mistreating his beloved wife. Amy took his hands in hers and led him to the sofa, then told him about all that had happened to Mai. Ed was outraged by all the abuse that had been heaped upon this poor girl. Not much given to rage anymore, his first impulse was to find the man that who had imprisoned her and beat him to a pulp. But his anger quickly gave way to concern. He asked his wife to bring Mai upstairs so that he could talk with her. They came to see him together. Mai struggled to meet his gaze as he told her how sorry he was for all the misfortune she had suffered. Ed thanked Mai for trusting them with her story, and assured her that they would help her and her baby get settled in the United States. Mai stepped forward and hugged the first good man she had met in many years. Ed echoed Amy's sentiments when he told Mai how glad he was to have her in his home. The three of them sat down in the living room, and the conversation turned to planning what they might do to help Mai to make her own way in the world.

During the next week, the tone at home was completely different. The inner harmony that had sustained Mai through the difficult years of her captivity burst forth into the Marif household. The tension of the previous week, and the evenings of awkward silence, was gone. Mai was eager to learn about her hosts. They talked about their experiences growing up, their education, their jobs, and their plans for Ed's parents. Mai could have been their daughter in age, but her experiences and deep spirituality made her seem more like a long-lost sibling. Mai was drawn to their lifestyle of minimal, thoughtful consumption, not that different from the way that she had lived growing up in Thailand. She compared her current lifestyle expectations to her formative years and realized that her exposure to extreme wealth and American pop culture had already altered her understanding of what she truly needed. She decided to join with Ed and Amy in redefining her needs more carefully, to enjoy a simpler life. She began to attend services with both of them, and she was pleasantly surprised to find and attend a Buddhist temple within driving distance of their home.

Amy contacted Jada about Mai's legal status, and was pleasantly surprised to find that she was eligible for a special visa as a victim of human trafficking. After consulting with Mai, they agreed to file the necessary documents immediately. They knew that regularizing her status in the United States would be the cornerstone of the new life that she would build.

Next, they decided to attend to her education. Amy went to the library and brought home books to prepare Mai for her GED. They found a Thai/English dictionary to help her with more complex words. Mai decided to write down every word that she didn't understand, and look it up in her dictionary. As such, her vocabulary improved by leaps and bounds. Ed and Amy were surprised by Mai's comprehensive understanding of English. With her daily practice of talking with Ed and Amy, her pronunciation improved as well, although their conversations would have sounded quite unusual to an outsider. Amy would speak with a slight Southern accent, as is characteristic of north Florida, then Ed or Mai would reply, each with a noticeably different, and stronger, accent.

Once Mai got started working to get her high school diploma by GED, Ed was inspired to join her, as he had no diploma from his school in Indonesia, either. Amy smiled as she watched them studying together in the evenings. They started going for drives on the weekends, so that Mai could learn about driving, although her license would have to wait until her citizenship was regularized. They talked about American culture, and Mai found Ed's experience of learning it from the outside especially helpful. Mai even started running with them in the mornings. She was quickly winded at the beginning, but her youth and endurance allowed her to improve rapidly, and soon they were able to complete four miles in a variety of routes, with Mai getting to know the neighborhood very well.

Their minimalist lifestyle gave Ed and Amy lots of free time. Amy sometimes was amazed by how much time she used to spend shopping for stuff, buying stuff, maintaining stuff, and worrying about stuff. Since she and Ed had embarked upon their new golden rule-based lifestyle, there were times when they had wondered what to do with their time. Working with Mai was just the challenge that they needed. She had so much to learn, but she was certainly an apt student. After a while, Ed had to struggle to keep up with her in their GED preparation.

The day that Mai's green card arrived, they decided to splurge and go to a local restaurant to celebrate. On the way, they passed the area that Amy had first found Mai, and they laughed about their first impressions of each other. In her heart, Mai marked that day as a second birthday, because she had finally begun to be her own person on that day. She offered a toast with her water glass to this couple that had given her a new life. It was also an auspicious occasion for Mai's unborn child. While Ed and Amy could probably afford to pay outright for a straightforward hospital delivery for the baby, it was reassuring that they would have financial help through Medicaid. Due to some built-in compassion for victims of human trafficking in federal law, Mai both got her green card quickly and was eligible for some necessary medical benefits.

Soon, Ed and Mai had both achieved their short-term goals. Mai had to take the state driving test two times, but she was finally able to get her driver's license. After that, she and Ed sat for the GED test together, and both passed. Mai's score was higher than Ed's, so the women is his life subjected him to some good-natured.

Mai had met Jada when Jada was helping with her legal problems, but she hadn't yet met Dawn. When Amy introduced them, she and Dawn became fast friends, despite the difference in their ages and backgrounds. Sometimes, Mai would take the car and go over to Dawn's house for the afternoon. This gave Ed and Amy some much-needed time by themselves. At a conscious level, they hadn't really noticed the subtle distance that had arisen in their relationship due to the arrival of their houseguest. Now that they could spend some uninterrupted time together, they enjoyed being able to talk without limits, or sit together without having to say anything. The Marif household reached a point of peaceful equilibrium, as they prepared for the baby's arrival.

One sunny Saturday morning in June, Ed and Amy were sitting at the breakfast table, enjoying the beautiful weather and an after-breakfast cup of coffee, when Mai came waddling as quickly as she could into the room. The bottom of her maternity dress was soaked. "I think the baby is coming," she said, unnecessarily. Amy stood and went to help her down the stairs to the car, while Ed quickly put their breakfast dishes in the sink, rushed out the back door to the garage, and got the car started. With Mai's medical coverage, they had to go to Harborview hospital. As Amy sat with Mai in the back of the car, holding her hand and just being present with her friend through the increasingly strong contractions, she was reminded of her last trip to this hospital, to sit in vigil for Jada. How much better to be going to welcome a new life, instead of hoping against hope that one would be saved. Using his hands free attachment, Ed called Dawn and Jada and let them know that they baby was coming. Dawn said that she would come right away, but Jada wasn't so sure. Ed knew that she hadn't been to this hospital since her accident. He assumed that she would come if she felt strong enough.

They arrived quickly, and the imminence of the baby's arrival sped them through the otherwise cumbersome admission procedures. Throughout her pregnancy, the doctor had said that Mai's baby was developing quite well. Mai was young and in good health, so they hoped the labor and delivery would go smoothly. As they had previously arranged, Amy stayed with Mai during the actual birth, and Ed waited with Dawn. After Ed filled her in on what had happened so far that day, Dawn told him about their last visit to the hospital. Ed hadn't realized how close Jada had come to death, or how much Amy had done for her after the accident. Ed glowed with pride as Dawn told him about the selflessness that Amy had shown in caring for her injured friend.

It took about four more hours for the baby to arrive. Amy came out to the waiting area with the good news, and the three of them rushed back into the birthing room. Mai was sweaty, and her hair was disheveled, but she was sitting up in bed, holding her new baby boy. The nurse had cleaned, checked, and weighed him already, wrapping him in a yellow towel. He lay in his mom's arms, his eyes closed in his little wrinkled face, and the three friends each had to contain their enthusiasm as they waited their turn to hold the little guy. When the nurse came back, she encouraged Mai to get some rest after her ordeal, which she did, confident that her baby was in good hands.

Amy stepped out into the hall and called Jada, letting her know that the baby had been born. Jada decided that she did want to come. After all, she had played an important role in this drama as Mai's legal advocate. She asked Amy to meet her in the parking lot when she arrived. While waiting for Jada's call, Amy took one last turn holding the new baby, then went out to meet Jada as Dawn took a turn holding Mai's son.

Watching Jada get out of the car, Amy could see her friend unconsciously recoil from the hospital. After all, she had experienced only pain and loss here. Amy rushed to her and embraced her, telling Jada with extra enthusiasm about the baby. After her initial reaction, Jada collected herself and they made their way through the hospital, as Jada made every effort to match Amy's enthusiasm.

When they got to the room, Mai had awakened and taken the little guy from Ed. The joy of seeing this new baby, the first one born in their circle of friends, helped Jada to get her mind out of the past and to enjoy the present. She asked Mai if she could hold the little boy, when Mai gently passed him to Jada. The angle of the afternoon sun coming through the window highlighted the scars on Jada's face as she bend forward, looking at this beautiful new baby.

With so many eager hands, Mai had to invoke maternal privilege to get her son back. The nurse had come into the room, and shooed everyone else out as she took some time to examine the mom and the baby, then worked with Mai on nursing her hungry son.

After the nurse left, while she was feeding her son, Mai took an inventory of herself. During the pregnancy, so much had happened in her life that she had sometimes not even thought about the life growing inside of her. She realized that she had mostly regarded him with her cultivated detachment. She had wanted to save him, but mostly because she was tired to Mr. Jones doing whatever he wanted with her. She had protected the baby, mostly to prevent Mr. Jones' doctor from violating her on her owner's behalf. When she had thought of the baby, she had sometimes been angry or resentful, as this last reminder of her brutal captivity grew inside of her. Now that he was here with her, however, she was so glad that she had kept him. Her baby had seemed like almost an abstract idea when he grew in her womb. Now that he was here, however, he was real in a new way and she loved him a love so strong she hadn't known that such a feeling was possible.

Jada, Dawn, Amy, and Ed sat in the waiting room together, taking turns extolling the virtues of this new baby. After a while, they talked about the last time that they had been here in the hospital. Seeing the baby seemed to have taken the edge off Jada's emotions, and she was able to talk about the pain and fear that she had endured. Dawn and Amy told her about their own struggle between hope and despair. By the end of the conversation, a new level of healing seemed to have happened. They decided to take turns staying with Mai and the baby for the night. Ed and Amy would take the first shift, Jada the second, and Dawn the third. Amy had made arrangements to take a week off once the baby was born, so she called Chuck on his cell phone and activated the arrangement. She would do the necessary work from home that week, but would be available to help Mai with the baby.

Since mother and baby were both healthy, they were sent home on Monday. Mai put the little guy in his new car seat, and then sat with him in the back, while Amy drove them home. Mai had not wanted to know the baby's gender, so they had decorated the nursery and purchased outfits with gender neutral colors. When they got home, things finally seemed right. It had been odd to set so many things up for a baby's arrival, then to walk by the empty room. Now that the baby was here, his room seemed joyous, not empty. Ed and Amy used the upstairs master bedroom since they moved in, but the other two had remained empty. When Mai had arrived, they had agreed that it would be best for her to use the fourth bedroom on the lower floor. Now that they were all such good friends, Ed had moved her things into one of the upstairs bedrooms, and they had made the other into the nursery. That way, Ed and Amy could help out with the baby. When they got home, Amy helped mother and son up the stairs and into the living room. Once they were settled into a comfortable rocking chair, Amy went out to get a few baby supplies. When Ed got home from work, he was pleasantly surprised that the house seemed more lively than ever. He got a turn holding the little guy after dinner, then they all went to bed early.

It was hard getting used to the lack of sleep that comes with a newborn. By using a breast pump, Mai was able to store some milk so that Ed and Amy could take turns feeding the little guy. After a couple of days, Mai decided to name him Benjamin Edward, his middle name in honor of her gracious hosts. Ed was flattered and a little embarrassed by this honor, but in no time the little boy had taken on the name and defined it. The lack of sleep that they all experienced was difficult at first. At the hospital, Ed had found out about how good a friend Amy had been to Jada. Now, his experience caring for his younger brothers and sisters as a youth gave him an edge in caring for little Ben. The two ladies were astonished at his latent child care abilities. Ben was a good-natured boy anyway, but Ed's extensive experience helped get the household settled with its newest, and youngest, member.

In a couple of months, when Ben started sleeping through the night, Ed, Amy and Mai decided that the next step in Mai's personal growth would be developing marketable skills. While she was always welcome at the Marif household, her life before her arrival had always been controlled by others. Now that she had the opportunity, Mai wanted to be able to stand on her own two feet. Ed and Amy encouraged her to seek out a career that would interest and challenge her, while meeting her financial needs. This became Mai's new project, and she was amazed but slightly daunted by the variety of opportunities available to her. In the meantime, she did more than her share of the household chores, and Ed and Amy were thankful for her help. Jada and Dawn had grown quite attached to little Ben as well, so their household sometimes felt like it had grown in a year from a family of two to one of six. Amy and Ed decided to enjoy the affectionate chaos.

Ed realized that Mai would need a car if she was really going to make it on her own. With his interest in mechanical things, he had attended a few car shows over the years, and he had a creative idea of how to get a new car. Once he had done his research, he showed Amy the brochure for a 1938 Ford kit car that he had found. He had contacted several local car builders, and had found a man who would put the car together for him. Instead of using new running gear and the typical Chevy v-8 engine, however, Ed had decided to refurbish a used drive train based upon the Volkswagen four cylinder direct injection turbo diesel. In the light fiberglass car, and using biodiesel, they would be able to create an environmentally friendly, economical vehicle made by a local craftsman. Amy reminded him that they domestic auto industry was one of the few manufacturing businesses that provided the average worker with a good living wage. He agreed, but his natural aversion to factories led him to want to try a different way. The costs of taking care of Mai and Ben, with the associated legal and medical bills, had somewhat depleted their savings. However, as they continued to simplify their lives, they hoped to increase their rate of savings. They did need another car, and Amy was pleased with Ed's enthusiasm for the project. He was like a kid at Christmas. They decided to build the car, hoping to finish it in time to give Amy's car to Mai on the second anniversary of her green card

While they had told Mai that they were going to become a two car family, they implied that the second car was going to be theirs, as well. They wanted to surprise her at her "anniversary." Ed found out that he could do some of the hard physical work and save money on the project. Several weekends found him out at the u-pull wrecking yards with specifications from the car builder as to what was needed. With a friend from his Islamic center who owned a truck, Ed would grab his tools and off they went. There, they would scour the acres of partially-disassembled vehicles for the part they needed, and then remove the often heavy and unwieldy pieces. After work, or during lunch, Ed would deliver these parts to the hot rod shop, which would clean and refurbish them. He was learning a lot about the way that cars are put together, and he was gaining an appreciation for the fabrication and artistic skills that his builder showed.

Karl, the car builder, was also taking a crash course in diesel engines, because he had never used one before. In this bad economy, a job was a job, but he had never built a car with so little power. He knew that the finished car would be comfortable and reliable, but it wasn't his cup of tea. For him, a hot rod needed a growling big block under the hood to be truly finished. Working with Ed was a little different, also. Ed wanted a far greater role in building the car than any of his other clients. Karl feared that his meddling would compromise the quality of the project, but Ed proved to be an apt and obedient assistant, and they got to be, if not friends, at least acquaintances during the buildup. Unlike some of his customers, Ed was always good for the fees that they agreed upon, and Karl appreciated that. They decided to go with a canary yellow exterior and a black interior. Ed had chosen the body style so it could seat four, so Karl got to design a very different interior than the usual billet aluminum adorned, two seat street rod. Ed had found some nice used power seats and stereo equipment from wrecked cars, and insisted that Karl incorporate these parts. Most of Karl's cars used new, expensive, custom pieces specifically designed for street rods, and he had gotten to the point that he could assemble a car without too much thought. Some days, the extra work and planning required to assemble this junkyard hot rod was irritating, and he kicked himself for taking on the project. Most of the time, however, he was enough of an engineer that he could see the project as a challenge for him to face and overcome. Furthermore, such a car might give him better exposure to the green crowd, who had no use for his previous wares.

As the project went along, Ed spent more weekends working on the car. This let Amy, Dawn, and Mai spend more time together. Amy enjoyed this new group of ladies even more than the old, since this group seemed to bring out the best in each other. An outsider might have thought that he had three moms from the way these women helped each other care for him. Mai's entirely different life experiences had given her an outsider's view of American society, which challenged and interested the other two women . The three of them all had embraced a lifestyle of compassionate consumption, as well, and the solutions to the problem of practically living this ideal in the real world gave them a constant topic of conversation. As Mai became more comfortable with these older women, she challenged them about the underlying assumptions of their new lifestyle.

"You two have really changed your purchasing habits, with a goal of improving the lot of your fellow human being. But, have you thought about what would happen if you could wave a magic wand and everyone in the United States did the same thing?"

"Sure, consumption would be much lower, debt would be lower, natural resource usage would be lower, and the people who make our food and other products would earn a fair wage from their labor."

"This is true of the few people at the local farmer's market that you frequent. But I'm asking about a change in the buying habits of the 300 million wealthiest people on earth. I think that there would be several negative consequences if every American decided to follow your example. First, many workers in the modern world with highly specialized skills couldn't completely produce the products on which they now labor. They would either have to gain all the skills necessary to make the complete product, as well as the capital, materials, and machinery, or they would have no way to make a living. Furthermore, you ladies have an implied bias against anything made overseas. The inextricable connections of the modern global economy ensure that people all around the world are dependent upon American consumers to buy their products. If all Americans purchased as you do, it would be a great boon to relatively wealthy American laborers, but quite a blow to poor workers around the world. Last, your bias against manufactured products would be the end of the explosion of complex high technology devices that must be manufactured to be affordable. Certainly people lived without them in the past, and it is possible to buy them second hand now, but life is much more convenient with microwaves, cell phones, TV, and automatic washers and dryers. Someone has to buy them new, so that you can get them used."

Amy was somewhat put out by this attack. "What do you propose? Do you think that the status quo is the best, that we should quit doing what we are doing out of global solidarity?"

"Certainly not. I am challenging you to expand your vision. You have had little interest from your friends in your new lifestyle, so you seem to think that no one will copy you. But what if people do? I suggest that you don't just propose a return to the late nineteenth century, but that you develop a model for an equitable new millennium."

"What do you propose?" Dawn asked. "Of all of us, you best know the human cost of dire poverty."

"I honestly don't have a solution. I know that the people in my village make great rice, which people here in Seattle could enjoy it and pay them a fair price for their produce, but making the connection on a large scale seems quite a challenge. Also, from what Ed has said, the problem wasn't the making of shoes, but the unsafe, inhumane conditions and the poor pay. There has to be a way to purchase products not just in a way fair to the vendor, but also in a way that sends our money to the people who need it the most. And those people are not only here in the America. They are all around the world.

The other two ladies were challenged by Mai's views. They had felt that they were making the world a little better place through their changed buying habits, but she had seen the unintended consequences of their actions. As they watched Ben crawl around the living room, they realized that she was right, that they couldn't separate an interconnected world. But it took their project, which made them feel noble (truth be told), and raised it to a level of complexity that seemed unmanageable. The conversation moved on to other topics, but Amy kept pondering Mai's ideas. She decided to talk to Ed and get his thoughts on compassionate consumption in the global economy.

After months of work, Ed and Karl were close to finishing the car. They had completed the paint job, installed the drive train, and assembled most of the interior. Ed came over early that Sunday to hear it start for the first time. It took a few tries, and some mechanical and computer adjustments, but soon it was running like a top. Karl gave Ed the keys, took it down from the lift, and asked to go for a ride.

The car performed flawlessly, until the battery unexpectedly died. Karl called the shop, and they delivered another one, but he needed to check out the charging system before completing the car. Ed hadn't thought about the way people would stare at the striking yellow car. He had merely picked a style and color that he enjoyed. He hoped Amy wouldn't mind this unexpected attention when she drove it. Anyhow, he had a week to think about it, while Karl was applying the finishing touches.

The next week, they took delivery of the car on Friday after work. Although their insurance and gas expenses would increase, they enjoyed being able to do two tasks at the same time.

They had made a lot of changes in their lifestyle over the years. Some of them had been quite inconvenient, although not very noticeable to outsiders. Some, like their decision to take Mai in, had changed their whole life. This car, although it had taken quite a bit of Ed's time, didn't seem like much of a change. After all, it basically moved them from one place to another, just like Amy's car did. But it seemed that people would often approach them and ask questions about the car. Hot rod enthusiasts admired the body, then were surprised to find that the car was economical to operate and friendly to the environment, and less expensive than other, similar vehicles. People concerned about the environment would smell the biodiesel and want to talk about the car. They had never seen such a "cool" but green machine. Friends and family marveled at the great gas mileage and relatively low price. Over and over, Ed and Amy had a chance to talk about their idea of golden rule purchasing. Eventually, they made up a small trifold pamphlet giving an overview of their ideas. Ed joined a car club and started going to shows, and his unique "ride" drew enough interest that it seemed they were always printing flyers. Not everyone could see the value in what they were doing, but many people decided to start small and help others through altering their buying habits.

Amy and Ed talked about Mai's objections, and realized that she was right. At some point, if they wanted to "change the world," they would have to create a strategy that involved the rest of the world. But they just weren't sure where to start.

On the second anniversary of the receipt of her green card, they took Mai to the same restaurant where they had celebrated last year, as well. Ben was visiting with "aunt" Jada. With their friends all wanting time with the little guy, there was no shortage of volunteer babysitters for the occasional night out. After their meal, Amy gave Mai a large, wrapped box with a big bow. Mai commented on how light the box seemed, and then rattled it, trying to guess what was inside. When she opened it, she found a car key. Not sure what this meant, she gave Ed a questioning look. "It's the key to Amy's car. We're keeping the '38 Ford, and giving you her car. You need reliable transportation to get on with your life."

Mai couldn't believe the generosity of her friends. They gave and gave to her, and asked nothing in return but her friendship. They had helped her to become the independent person that she had always wanted to be. In her heart, she resolved to pay them back, but she only said thank you and gave each a big hug and a smile, then practically ran from the restaurant to drive over to Dawn's place and show her other friend her new present. Now, she only needed a job, and she would be ready to strike out on her own.

Amy and Ed drove home in the Ford, discussing the very same thing. Mai had not decided on a career as yet, but they were convinced that it was time to get her started on something. They could help care for Ben while she went to school or got some training. They were just not sure, as Mai was not, what she should pursue.

The next time the ladies went to coffee, Mai drove them proudly in her new car. Amy and Dawn were able to concede that she had brought up unintended consequences that had not occurred to either of them, which would have to be addressed if their plan could work on a large scale. They all agreed that they had completed the easy part, identifying the problem. Now, they would each work on developing a solution. The two adoptive "aunties" took turns holding Ben during their conversation. They talked about their work and their families, then Mai drove them all home. On the drive home, Ben sat in his car seat in the middle of the back seat of the car, looking out the windows and babbling and pointing.

JOE

Joe had to admit he was finally bored. It was a bright, sunny summer day in Seattle, and, as he reclined on his sofa and looked out at the sparkling waters of Lake Washington, he wasn't sure what to do. When he was younger, his drive to succeed and find the next big thing in software, as part of a small but dedicated team, had consumed all of his time but had left him with vast wealth. He had always told himself that he would "live" when he retired. For the first few years, he had done just that. He had bought cars, boats, and houses, enjoyed them for a while, and then sold them. After a while, one was just the same as the next. He had taken up physical fitness and golf for a while. He had achieved quite a bit in both areas, but neither took all that much time, leaving a large chunk of the day for him to fill. Then, he had travelled the world, plying his golf skills at the best resorts the world had to offer. Often, he would play a course, then lease a fine home for a couple of months and just see the sights. After he had seen all that had interested him as a kid, he kept going for a while, but eventually the ruins and temples and churches and mountains and restaurants all joined into one big blur, and he found himself bored again. He had even tried "giving back", volunteering at local organizations and giving money to humanitarian causes. While this made him feel good for a while, it didn't really challenge him. That was what he was looking for, he decided, the next big challenge. Mark, his bodyguard, was trying to keep him from trying truly dangerous things, but maybe that would bring the rush that he wanted. Maybe he could call the Russians and take the next trip into space. That would be different. Or would it?

Except for Mark, Joe lived a mostly solitary existence. In school, he had been the archetypal nerd, having no time for friendship in the pursuit of knowledge. In college, he had tried to date, but he had been poor, wimpy, and lacking in social refinement, a dangerous combination. During his software career, he had sometimes dated a co-worker, but had found that the inevitable breakup so soured even the working relationship that he couldn't bring himself to so damage the team and, thus, limit his chance of success. Women that he had met had complained that he only talked about technical things that were interesting to him and unfathomable to anyone else. After he had started to make some money, he had suddenly been surrounded by attractive women. He had dated a few, but found that their interest usually only extended to his ability to buy them expensive presents. He had come close to marrying one, in particular. He was glad that he had seen through her facade before he had to split his hard-earned wealth with her in divorce court. At this point in his life, he would usually contact an "escort service" when he wanted to be with a woman. Like everything else in his life, however, they all became a blur after a while. He had achieved all the success that he had hoped for as a youngster, and more, yet his current loneliness and boredom made it seem a hollow victory indeed.

Mark had been checking out the security tapes, and came back in the living room to check on the boss. He seemed even more melancholy than usual. What do you get for the man who has everything? Mark had no idea. He just tried to keep the man safe from kidnapping or robbery, served as his personal trainer in the pool and gym on the grounds of the house, and kept track of his schedule. After all his training and experience in combat, this was a creampuff job. However, it did allow him to be home every night, unlike many other jobs that had had held. He and his wife, Joy, were able to live, rent free, in a spacious guest house on the grounds of Joe's mansion. Furthermore, it was a near certainty that he would not be killed in action, a fate that had befallen many of his comrades in the Teams. He looked at his Palm-like handheld device, and saw that they had a car show to do today. Good, he could only take so much of this moping. At least they would get out of the house!

"Hey boss, the big hot rod show out in Puyallup starts with racing tonight. You have a space booked for your car. We should probably get ready if we're going to get there on time."

Joe hadn't notice Mark come into the room, but that was not unusual. Good, at least there was something to break up the monotony. "Well, let's get some cars and get out there. Did you register specific cars, or can we take what we want."

"I was hoping to take the '41 Willys myself, but I didn't register specific cars, so you can choose."

As they talked, they took the elevator to the basement levels of the house. The bottom two floors were a "garage", if such a space could be called that. At one time, Joe had had over fifty cars of various levels of performance or limited production. Today, he probably had half that many. European sports cars and sedans, historic racers, and a few hot rods, each one the best of its kind. While he had taken a beating on his boats when he sold them, he had actually made some money on the cars. They didn't make his heart race like they had when he first purchased them, but they were kind of fun. At least, they were different.

Given his current feeling of indifference, he decided to give Mark the car he chose. It was gleaming black, with very little chrome. The polished, injected supercharger sticking through the shaved stock hood and the large tires that peeked out from below the lowered body were the only hints of the massive straight-line acceleration of the 21st century gasser. The car was full of alcohol and detailed, ready to go courtesy of his maintenance staff. For himself, Joe chose something historic. This year, the show would allow cars up to 1972. As such, he decided to bring his Porsche 917. The actual car that had won the 24 hours of LeMans race in 1971, this car had it all, power and handling. The roar of the engine was no match for Mark's supercharged gasser, but this car would corner, as well. He had repainted it in the Gulf Oil blue paint scheme. With Mark in the lead, they left the underground garage and drove out onto the streets and I-90. Many people would tow such a rare car, but Joe felt that it was made to drive, and the full experience of the car could only be found by driving it. He even competed in the historic race in nearby Auburn from time to time. Since the hot rod show was on, he hoped that they would not be stopped by the police in these exotic cars, as long as they drove within the speed limits.

When they arrived at the show, Joe was pleased to see that Mark had found their favorite spot. It was shaded by one of the grandstands, and their two parking areas had a little space around them. Not wanting to stand out, Joe felt that it would be better for Mark to seem to be a fellow car enthusiast than his bodyguard. Also, Mark still got a kick out of the cars. He didn't have all the stuff that Joe did, so he was still laboring under the mistaken notion that, if he did, he would be happy. From his own experience, Joe didn't think that was the case, but he was fairly sure that he couldn't convince Mark.

They had set up the cars, cleaned them up a little from the drive, set up their lawn chairs, picked up their rental car, and headed out to the track. The evening of racing was especially loud this weekend, with the nitromethane powered historic dragsters as the highlight of the evening. Mark wanted to race the Willys in the historic event, but Joe vetoed the idea. He wanted his bodyguard's mind on business. They were going to just go home for the evening, but Mark had talked Joe into renting two rooms at a local hotel. So Joy, Mark's wife, came and met them, and they shared a suite, with a common living area and two bedrooms. When Mark's family was around, Joe could almost convince himself that he wasn't really alone.

The next day, they started early to make sure that the cars were clean, put up the signage describing the history and documenting the restoration process, the got ready for the large crowds. Joe asked Joy to watch the display while he and Mark went looking at all the other cars at the show. She agreed, but reminded the guys that she would not be able to answer any questions. Joe didn't care, as he mostly came for a break in the monotony. If people enjoyed his cars, fine. If not, that was their problem.

Every year, it was so much of the same. Smoothed out antique bodies, painted with bright colors, with the same old suspensions and Chevy small block V-8 engines. Joe and Mark had made it their hobby each year to find something different. There was a 1955 Chevy with a full, late model Corvette drive train that had been nicely detailed that Joe really enjoyed. A couple of nice stock restorations were a pleasant change. Someone had even put a twin-turbo Supra drive train in a 1948 Dodge sedan. A real sleeper, and well-engineered.

A few of the nostalgia drag cars were on display, as were some modern Pro-Street twin turbo racing cars. Mark especially enjoyed these powerful cars. He introduced himself as the owner of the Willys gasser, and was able to get the guys to run their engines and talk tech for a while.

In the midst of a whole bunch of fiberglass 32 Ford look-alikes, they found something truly unique. The yellow paint was fine but not spectacular, but the name "Green Machine" led him to take another look. The car was powered by a small turbo diesel engine, and, unlike most of the other cars, it would seat four people in comfort. Clearly, it had been designed as a daily driver, not a trailer queen. Joe respected that, as he drove all of his cars, no matter how valuable. The photos on display showed that the owner, an Asian man, had done quite a bit of the work himself. The car had substituted quality craftsmanship for expensive aftermarket products. For Joe, time was worth more than money, so he appreciated an owner-built car. Two women were sitting by the car, with a small boy. He went up to them, and asked about the car. They introduced themselves as Mai and Amy, and talked a little about Ed and his dream. Then, they gave Joe one of their brochures and told him about their "campaign" of compassionate consumerism. They explained how the car fit with their plans to buy from local craftspeople, even using biodiesel fuel from a local Seattle company. Joe started to worry that they were cranks looking for money or volunteers, but they asked him for neither. He told them where his cars were located, and invited them to come by with Ed, if they liked. After that, he and Mark felt that they had seen all they wanted to at the show. Joe bought some food and drinks and had lunch with Mark and Joy, then she went home and Joe and Mark manned the cars for the rest of the afternoon.

They went home for the night, and then came back the next morning. They left late, after Mark and Joy were finished with church. Joe didn't attend, himself, but he didn't begrudge his bodyguard his beliefs. While he was waiting, he read through the brochure that he had gotten from the people with the yellow car. They certainly had different ideas about buying things. Joe had never really thought about how his purchasing decisions affected the lives of the people who made his products. His quick mind saw the same flaws in their plans that Mai had spotted, however. They were almost trying to put a kind face on protectionism. He decided to see if they would come visiting. If so, he would talk with them and see what they had to say. Here was something new for him to try. He kept these thoughts to himself, however, as they all rode back to the show in Mark's sedan.

Mark and Joe stayed by the cars. Joy stayed with them for a while, then went and looked at some of the manufacturer's displays. Lots of people came to look at the cars, but few actually wanted to talk to Joe or Mark. Occasionally, with one of his race cars, a former driver would see it, and come talk to him. That was especially fun. Joe wasn't even averse to letting an old driver take the car out on a track day. After all, he kept them in ready-to-drive condition. Anyhow, as Joe was woolgathering, Ed, Amy, Mai and Ben stopped by. Joe didn't recognize them at first, but then Amy reminded him of their conversation the other day. None of the three were really car enthusiasts, so they made a little noise about Joe's cars, but they didn't have the knowledge to really appreciate them.

Ed reminded Joe that he had invited them to stop by. He mentioned that people often had further questions about how Ed and Amy would apply the principles of golden rule purchasing to their daily lives.

"I read your brochure this morning," said Joe. "I think I understand your ideas, although I had never really thought about those things myself. When I started to upscale your plans, however, I had some questions. How are you going to address the dependence of workers in other countries on American consumers? Also, products have to be made new before they are available used. Your car, for instance. I applaud your reuse of many components, but somebody had to make those parts new before they were available to you at a salvage yard. If everyone followed your program, I think it would be beneficial for some American entrepreneurs, but would hurt domestic workers with specialized skills and foreign workers who depend on American markets."

Ed wasn't used to having his ideas challenged so strongly. Most people congratulated him on trying to make a difference. However, Mai's objections, presented through Amy, had at least gotten him thinking along these lines. While he thought about what to say, Mai chimed in.

"I don't know if you remember from yesterday, but I'm Mai. I told Amy the same thing. We need to really think through the unintended consequences of our plan before we encourage lots of other people to follow it."

"So, you guys want to maintain the status quo?" objected Ed. "Don't kid yourselves; those foreign workers are nearly slaves. They are risking their lives on the job, making trinkets for us. I want to end those abuses."

"Why would they do that? Are they masochists? I don't think so. I think that you need to find ways to give them a better choice through your plan, not just make them unemployed. Perhaps you could create a third-party service that would verify the working conditions of your suppliers. Maybe you could even set up your own factories, becoming a golden rule employer, not just a compassionate consumer. Don't run from the world, change it," suggested Joe.

"We are just working folks. We don't have factories or employ third party verifiers. We just try to use the spending that we do anyhow to try to make the world a better place. I think that is more than most people do. I don't think that we can do more," objected Ed.

"How about asking for help? People are always looking for worthy projects in which to participate. I have some friends that seem to want to do something meaningful, but they just haven't found the right project," suggested Joe.

Mai had been thinking along these same lines, but not so big. "How would you organize such a project? I would think that the regulations, costs, and staffing would be prohibitive. "

"The idea is paramount," said Joe. "Obviously, it can be done, as is shown by the great number of current multinationals. The only difference would be organizing one to do good, not just make money. There are people who know how to get this stuff done, and, in fact, are doing it right now. The key is getting in touch with them."

Joe could feel the ideas starting to flow. As he had sat in the sun, watching people go by, he had let these ideas turn in his head. He often needed some time to mull things over, but he usually came up with some good ideas after just letting things percolate. "I applaud what you guys are doing. Hey, I've bought a lot of things in my life, and never really thought about what happens to the people who made them. You guys are making a difference. I just think that you could do more. I've been looking for something to work on for a while. If it's OK with you, how about if I noodle this out for a little bit, then tell you what I'm thinking. Maybe, Mai, if you'd be interested, we could meet and brainstorm. Then, we could meet as a group and kick some ideas around. Who knows, we may be able to take this to a new level."

Ed wasn't sure about this guy, who was jumping into the middle of his pet project. He recognized the vanity of that thought just after he had formed it, however. If Joe's ideas were good, then they should consider them. If not, it should be obvious. If it was really about making the world a better place, and not just about making him feel virtuous, then Ed should give this Joe guy a chance. Mai looked to him, seemingly for his approval. "If you want to, go for it. If you guys can meet on the weekend, we'll fight over Ben with the other "aunties." It seems like you guys are thinking along the same lines. I bet you come up with some great ideas."

Mai told Joe that they lived on Beacon Hill. He said that he lived on the "Eastside," but that they could meet for coffee on Mercer Island if that would be convenient. They settled on the next Saturday. Joe introduced his "friend," Mark, who had been listening in on the conversation. Joy returned right about that time. Introductions were made all around, and then everyone went their separate ways. Before too long, it was time to break down their displays and head home. They put the signs that they had brought in Mark's car, as well as their lawn chairs, and then got ready to head for home. Once the gates were opened, the two men fired up their powerful engines and enjoyed the drive home, watching the landscape being painted by the sunset behind them.

Mai had kept thinking about the contradictions present in the way her new friends were living. She had some ideas as to how they could be resolved, but found herself eager to bounce them off this Joe guy. She was excited about their meeting the following Saturday.

The week went by at its usual pace. With Ben to care for, the three friends stayed fairly busy, so it was Saturday before they knew it. Ed offered to go along with Mai to this meeting with a near stranger. Mai had a good feeling about him, however, and she had a cell phone for emergencies, so she decided to go by herself. When she got to the coffee shop, Joe was already there. He waved from a table near the window. Mai didn't notice him, but Mark was parked across the street, in Joe's Tahoe. She went into the restaurant, ordered a chai tea drink, and then went to sit with Joe.

Joe asked her a little about their group. Mai told him that Ben was her son, and that Ed and Amy were a couple that had taken her in. She didn't tell him her whole story, but just that she had found herself homeless and pregnant, and that Amy and Ed had taken her in with no questions asked. She told him how they had helped her with her medical and educational needs, as well as her room and board. Her gratitude towards, and admiration for, them was apparent as she talked. Joe, in turn, told her that he had grown up in Kirkland, typical suburban upbringing, and that he worked in software development. Each took what the other said at face value, without further question.

They talked about what Ed and Amy were trying to do. Joe asked about their lifestyle at home, in a roundabout way. He wondered if they practiced what they preached. It didn't take long for him to satisfy himself that these folks were the real deal. They talked about some of the weaknesses of the plan if it was upscaled, and Mai shared some of her ideas to address them. Joe was paying close attention to what she said. She could tell he was eager to add his ideas, but he waited until she was finished saying her piece before he spoke.

Joe told her that he could see forming cooperatives in different areas overseas, in which local people could entirely process, and then sell, one of their traditional products directly to American markets. Mai reminded him that the "middlemen" in these transactions usually made the lions' share of the money, and that they wanted nothing to do with a plan like that. Joe impatiently said that was not what he had in mind, but rather a two-tier funding structure. The customer would pay for the products, and the proceeds would go directly to the people who made them. The distribution network would be supported by charitable giving earmarked for that purpose. He even had some initial ideas about marketing and products. Mai could tell he was excited about the prospect. When they finished their coffee, he shook her hand and thanked her for coming to talk to him about this project. He asked for her phone number, but she thought it would be better if she called him, so they made an appointment for a phone meeting in a week. As they left, Joe held the door for her. He couldn't wait to get started. Here was something that he could really sink his teeth into. He hopped into the Tahoe with Mark, and off they went. He was eager to get home and flesh out some of the ideas that he had discussed with Mai.

For the next week, Joe worked on a business plan for the new venture. Here was the challenge that he had been seeking. He could see that this project would require a lot of funding and would have many challenges, some of which he could not even predict at the beginning. This is just what he needed. He especially needed to call some of his contacts in government, to find out what might be involved in establishing co-ops in other countries.

After a week, Mai called him, and he gave her an overview of his plans to date. She told him that she would arrange another meeting with her friends. Joe had even included some ideas about funding, but they seemed kind of "half baked" to Mai. She reminded him that Ed, then Amy, had been the ones who had originated this whole thing, and that they would take the lead in the project. Joe agreed to take a supporting role, despite his secret plans to finance the whole operation. He saw an important role for Mark in the plan, as well, and asked if he could be involved in the planning meeting. They made arrangements to get together at Joe's house the following Friday night. When they hung up the phone, Joe reflected on Mai's quick wit and clear vision. Clearly, she would play an important role in the plans that he was developing. He had noticed her pronounced accent, yet excellent vocabulary, and wondered what her story was. No doubt, it would be interesting.

Mai resolved to bring up Joe's potential involvement at dinner that evening. She could see that he would bring a key element to their plan. Finally, they could overcome the provinciality built into the compassionate consumption lifestyle by her friends, and make it into a real force for good in the whole world.

Dinnertime had become a kind of family meeting every day. Each of the friends would discuss what they had done that day, and ideas and problems were often sorted out at the dinner table. Mai listened as Amy and Ed talked about their time together at work. Since she hadn't started at a career, she had little to add to this conversation. When asked about her day, she mentioned that she was still mulling over the challenges of their golden rule lifestyle. She asked if they had either had further thoughts about how to deal with the protectionist tendencies of the plan. They offered some vague comments, but nothing specific.

Mai told them about her conversation with Joe, and the ideas that they had developed to "go global". She mentioned that Joe would like to meet with them and go over his ideas. They were taken aback that this "outsider" was becoming such a force in "their" plan. Although his ideas seemed to have merit, they weren't sure that they were ready for such a grand undertaking, or that they could provide the start-up funding necessary for the plan to work. After a little cajoling, Mai talked them into attending the meeting on Friday night. After all, she argued, Joe's ideas made sense. What would it hurt to hear him out? Once they agreed, she got up from the table, put her dishes away, and went to her room, before they could change their minds, satisfied that she had accomplished her goal. She asked herself why she felt so strongly about this project. After some reflection, she realized that grinding poverty had been the root of all the evil that had befallen her in her life. Her parents would not have sold her if they could afford to feed their family. Ed's family and friends would not have accepted such a dangerous, demeaning, and difficult job if better employment were available. Mai knew that the people in her village wanted to work hard, and provide for themselves with the fruit of their labor. The solution wasn't some kind of international charity. Ed and Amy's plan, writ large, could solve the root problem that had led to her enslavement and abuse. If only her family could have received a price for their produce proportionate to the work they had put into it, they would never have had to choose between their children and starvation. Mai knew that many people around the world had to make this heart-rending choice. While they might not be able to change the whole world, they could at least make a start. The purchasing power of American dollars could become an instrument for good, if only directed properly. She felt that Joe had a plan and the resources to begin to accomplish this change, and she was ready to do whatever she could to help accomplish this worthy goal. She called Joe the next day and told him that they would come to the meeting on Friday. She got his address, then printed out directions on the computer.

This was a lot for Ed to take in. It took him about a day to realize that he was acting childish. He was treating Joe's involvement like a turf war. If their lifestyle of compassionate consumption was just to make Ed feel better about himself, it really didn't deserve to succeed. If, however, he was really about making a difference in the world, everyone who was pulling in the same direction was his ally. Having put his ego aside, he became cautiously optimistic about the meeting

Ed decided to drive the Ford to Joe's house. If nothing else, the car had proven to be a great conversation starter, and they were hoping for a great conversation. Mai had never been to the house before, but the directions seemed clear. They were surprised to find themselves on Mercer Island, again. Joe had said that he lived on the Eastside, but had implied that he did not live in that part of town when he agreed to meet with Mai. When they saw the large gate set in a tall brick fence near the water, they thought that they had taken a wrong turn. Joe had left the cars from the show parked along the long driveway however. Ed spotted the cars, and knew this was the right place. He went up to a speaker, and was surprised to hear Mark answer and remotely open the gate. After winding through a large, well-manicured lawn, they came upon a large house. Joe opened the door himself. He could tell that the friends were a little intimidated by the place, but he did his best to play the gracious host and show them around. It was twilight, and from the all-glass front of the house they had a beautiful view north of Lake Washington and the lights of the city of Bellevue. They could see a large motorboat moored at his private dock, and, as they went through the house, they found a heated indoor pool, and original paintings that nicely complemented an impersonal, but professionally assembled, decor.

Amy, who had grown up in relative plenty, was most impressed by the surroundings. She realized that her parents' opulent home seemed like a shack compared to this mansion. More than her friends, she realized the magnitude of Joe's wealth, and what it could mean for their project.

Knowing what he did about their commitment to a minimalist lifestyle, Joe had debated the wisdom of showing them his opulent home. However, he also wanted to convince them that he could finance the plans that he had made. Also, he wanted to gauge their reactions. All in all, they seemed to appreciate the beauty of his house, but remained mostly unaffected by its opulence. When they got to the dining room, Mark was waiting for them. Joe introduced him as his bodyguard, which explained to the friends why he was so ubiquitous. They inquired about Joe's family, and found that he was single.

During the meal, Joe, Mark, Amy and Ed each had an opportunity to share a short version of their life story. Since they all knew Mai, she was content to sit between Ed and Amy and watch as a necessary rapport grew during the dinner. Ed used his story to tell how their golden rule lifestyle had begun, and how it had developed over the last few years. Joe was very interested, saying little but taking it all in. He could see how parts of his plan needed to be altered to fit with the spirit of what had come before. Ed's selfless vision of justice was very impressive. He could see why Mai wanted Ed and Amy to lead this effort. The hot rod puzzled him, however, until Ed explained how it fit with their vision. Privately, Joe could see that it also could be an outgrowth of the protectionism built into Ed and Amy's current way of life.

After dinner, they retired to the living room, and Joe presented his ideas. First, he had an idea to call their business "JustLife", which he felt emphasized both the minimalism and the compassion for others of the golden rule lifestyle. He had already bought the domain name justlife.org, in case the others agreed to the plan. He showed a PowerPoint of his thoughts on the website. He envisioned it informing vendors of their responsibilities if they were to join Just Life, customers to search for products and find information about the company, and a fundraising section.

Joe pointed out that their domestic and foreign vendors could find themselves competing with each other. As a result, they decided that they would only source a given product domestically or overseas, not both. Joe also had some guidelines for existing businesses to become JustLife vendors, but the labor practice standards were so high that no one was sure if any current companies would be interested. Joe had mentioned branding and selling through distributors, but Ed was adamant that no part of the sales price go to middlemen. So, that made the website the only storefront. Obviously, finding a freight vendor would be a high priority. They discussed going to all the crafts persons with whom they regularly had transactions, offering them an application, and starting JustLife with them. They all agreed that the first overseas venture would be critical. They would have to find the right confluence of product, location, and workforce, and a little luck, for the venture to be successful. They had thought of making LCD TVs, since these were a product they could not, in good conscience, currently purchase new. It seems like high tech, gifts and decorations, and foodstuffs seemed to be the best products to source overseas. Joe also proposed that the entire sales price go to the maker and transporter of the goods. JustLife would maintain corporate operations through donations only, particularly with donations from Joe. He had a logo and some business cards that he passed around. Everyone seemed to like the design, drawing as it did on the black and white look of "generic" grocery products from the eighties. As the evening went on, Joe seemed more and more energized. When asked about it, he pointed out how unfocused his life had been in the past. He had used his vast wealth to try just about everything, but it all got boring after a while. Meeting the Marif family at the car show, and the discussions that they had had, had energized him in a way he hadn't felt since his working days. He was eager to meet this challenge, and was excited about making a difference in the life of his fellow human beings. When the meeting was over, Joe walked them to the door, and then they made plans to meet at the same time a week later to formalize their plans.

Ed had mixed feelings during the week. At first, he was resentful towards Mai and Joe for hijacking his project. After all, he was the one who first thought of using one's purchases to make a better world. A day or two later, he realized how petty and egotistical he was being. He had pushed his version of the idea to its limits. Joe was proposing a new scale with greater humanitarian benefits. If Ed was really serious about helping his fellow human being, this evolution would be a good thing. Then, he started thinking about implementing the overseas aspect of the plan. He realized that the abandoned factory in which he had worked in Jakarta might be an excellent place for their TV cooperative. Security concerns would be relatively minimal, with a stable government and no real organized crime. If Amy was interested, Ed himself could run the project. He spoke the language, and had lots of experience working in that factory. The processes and machinery would be different, but he could see if some of his old garment co-workers would be interested in working there. As a side benefit, he would be able to see his parents and siblings again, without going through the lengthy and expensive process of sponsoring them for a green card in the United States. He wasn't sure if Amy would be willing to move across the world with him, but she had been to his country before. When they discussed the idea later in the week, Amy was cool to the plan but not entirely opposed. They decided that Joe's willingness to spend the fortune required to begin that project meant that they need not decide until the meeting on Saturday. By the end of the week, Ed was much more excited about the potential of JustLife.

Amy called Dawn over the weekend and talked to her about their new idea. Dawn had extensive experience in website design, and the website would be the center of their operation. Amy asked her friend if she would be willing to take on an initial design as a freelance project. They talked about what content they had planned to incorporate. Dawn was eager to get involved. She agreed to have a couple of screenshots ready for the meeting on Saturday, and a simple functional site by the following weekend. She would be burning some midnight oil, but, like Joe, she was eager to begin something that would benefit her fellow human being. She had joined with Ed and Amy in their golden rule lifestyle, and was eager to see what could happen if they expanded its scope.

Mai had been thinking about the guidelines for their vendors. After all, they did not want to get hoodwinked into supporting something that was against the very spirit of their program. On the other hand, they did not want regulations so odious that only a large corporation with a dedicated legal staff could get involved. Since the core of JustLife was equity, she decided to focus on that. First, every person engaged in any part of the manufacture of JustLife products would have to be paid at least a wage that would allow them to support themselves. No wage decisions would be made based upon prevailing wages, only upon cost of living. A co-operative ownership system would be preferable, but not required. In a co-operative system, employees should vest within three months, but their shares would automatically revert to the co-op upon their departure. High employee turnover would be grounds for dismissal from JustLife, as would an unsafe or hostile work environment. If any profit was made above the cost of labor, overhead and materials, it would be divided equally among all employees. No "perks" could be paid for with company money that were not equally available to all employees. All employees should earn enough to purchase the product that they were making, if they so desired. A version of the product, if not the only version of the product, should be offered for the local market that was affordable for local citizens. JustLife vendors would have to be willing to be inspected thoroughly upon their entry in the program, and then audited by JustLife at any time. JustLife vendors would be able to set their own price for their product. The JustLife team would make recommendations if they felt the price was out of line, but would ultimately sell the product at the price set by the vendor. Mai realized that there would be little incentive, at the beginning, for shipping companies to take up these terms, so they would have to write in an exception for them. Perhaps the company with the highest non-management mean wage would win the bid. Mai played around with some layouts verbiage, and had a pamphlet ready for the meeting Saturday.

Joe had been busy, as well. He put out an employment ad for a consultant familiar with all aspects of the manufacture of LCD televisions. He cast as wide a net as possible, realizing that only a few people would probably have the breadth of knowledge required for this project. He went to the printer and had business cards made for all five of the participants, with the JustLife logo he had designed and the motto, "Buying a better world." He had static-adhering stickers made for Ed and Amy's '39 Ford, hoping that they would use their unusual vehicle to publicize this new idea and its website. He talked with Mark about his willingness to participate in overseas security work, or other aspects of the JustLife plan. Lastly, he started to liquidate some of his vast fortune to fund the project. He knew he would need to retain some appreciating assets, to cover the ongoing expenses of the operation, but he would have to make a sizeable investment to get things going. He hoped that Amy would be willing to take over the financial side of the operation. He smiled as he thought about her surprise when she found out how much money was at her disposal.

For everyone but Joe and Mai, the week had been exceptionally busy, as they had to fit their Just Life planning time into their already busy schedule at work and at home. Nonetheless, the second meeting at Joe's house was very energetic, with each person taking their turn to show what they had accomplished during the week. There was very little dissention among the group members. Ed eagerly put the new stickers on the car, then they agreed to ask Dawn to produce a brochure, similar to the website, that the five of them could distribute when asked about JustLife. Joe asked that Dawn come along next week, if possible, so he could meet her and pay her for her work so far. Amy agreed to extend the invitation. Mai volunteered to help with the brochure, since she had free time during the week.

Once everyone had said their piece, Joe had the floor. He talked about how excited he was about this project, and how eager he was to begin. Everyone but Mark was surprised when he said that he planned to spend his entire fortune, if necessary, to get the project off the ground. When he mentioned how many millions of dollars he had already been able to realize so far, he did get the hoped-for surprise in response. Everyone else realized this was not a debating society anymore. They were really going to implement this plan! Joe asked Amy if she would be willing to become the first JustLife employee. With her accounting background, she could use the funds however she saw fit, with the only requirement being a regular report to the group. Amy had not come to the meeting looking for a job, so it took her back a little, but she could see that her role would be critical in getting the project off the ground. Chuck had been so good to her and Ed, she felt bad about leaving the dental lab. But she knew that this new project was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to make a large, positive change in the world, so she agreed to come on board once she had a trained a replacement at the lab. They decided that Ed should make some noise about leaving, as well, since he would be the point person for the factory in Jakarta. Poor Chuck would have his hands full, but Ed had enough time to train his most skilled team member to take his job and the associated promotion. Joe agreed to use the time before Amy came on board to get his lawyer to incorporate JustLife as a 501C3 non-profit, to review and draw up the necessary vendor agreements and other documentation. They also decided to research what would be involved in starting the factory in Indonesia. Joe's past political contributions would help, as he planned to ask his congressman to put him in contact with someone in the state department who could, in turn, put him in touch with the appropriate people in Jakarta. When they left, Joe was glad to get started, but everyone else was a little breathless from the rapidity with which the project was already moving. From dreaming to changing jobs in only one week!

Monday, Chuck seemed a little overwhelmed to lose his two key people. He half-heartedly tried to talk them into staying, but realized quickly how passionate they were about this project, then resigned himself to their gradual loss. Amy posted an ad for a skilled accountant, and it wasn't long before they had four good applicants, given the current economic downturn. Chuck selected Gerald, who seemed like a skilled and honest man, and it didn't take Amy long to explain the basics of the job to him. Due to the flexible nature of her new job, she told him and Chuck that she could come in on key days for a few weeks, such as payroll and month-end statements, and that she would be available to answer questions by cell phone, as well. This seemed a satisfactory arrangement, so she was able to begin her part of the JustLife assignment within three weeks.

Ed had a tougher challenge ahead of him. His extensive knowledge and experience allowed him to construct all kinds of crowns and bridges, no matter how complicated. He also was an expert in helping his staff with technical problems that they might have. Transferring all that knowledge to someone was proving a nearly impossible task. But he resolved to train a little every day, and he and Chuck agreed that, at the end of three months, they would consider the process complete. Now that Ed would be leaving, Chuck fully realized what an important contribution he made, and was thankful for the skill and passion Ed had brought to the lab. He made a point of brushing up his own skills, so that he could help out in the department after Ed was gone.

Dawn had come along to the next meeting of the JustLife team, and presented her ideas on the website. As promised, she had one made that was semi-functional, thus allowing the team to actually use it on Joe's big screen TV and give their thoughts on its presentation and functionality. Everyone was impressed with the work Dawn had done, even Amy. As long as she had known Dawn, she had never seen her work before. Joe paid her the agreed-upon amount, and invited her to come on board as the full time IT person. She would be in charge of website development, network and data security, and physical development and maintenance of the servers that would host the site. They talked about how to get computers that were in keeping with their philosophy, and decided to use Mai's freight plan as the rule, purchasing from the most employee-friendly company they could find. Dawn agreed to join the team after getting her current position filled. She would continue to freelance on the website until then. Joe found himself drawn to this attractive, skilled woman.

Mai decided to do some in-person vendor recruitment for JustLife. She spent the next few weeks delivering her brochures to people and families from whom they bought clothing, groceries, furniture, and even the car. If people showed immediate interest, she would give them a vendor agreement to sign and return. As time went by, she was slowly amassing enough items to give JustLife customers an interesting assortment of available products. Many of the vendors were able to provide Dawn with photos or their own web pages, which helped speed the website development. It was decided that new orders would be processed by JustLife, who would also receive the electronic payments. The order would then be placed with the vendor, along with an electronic funds transfer, and the vendor would be responsible to ship the items through the preferred freight provider. Amy had purchased the servers, and Dawn was setting them up in the small office space that they had rented. While Joe's house would be large enough to house the project, and he was willing to continue to host JustLife, having professional quarters set a better tone for vendor meetings and interviews, and made each team member feel more comfortable with their role.

Joe had made a little progress on the TV project. He had found a few people that would be able to layout the factory and guide their equipment purchases, but he hadn't quite found someone who could pull it all together. He kept looking for trade-specific publications and websites in which to advertise. Foreign ownership of Indonesian business was proving a thorny subject, as well. Only Joe and Mai were disappointed at the pace of that project. The rest of the partners realized that getting the TV factory up and running would be a bigger job than the whole domestic JustLife project in which they were already engaged. They felt it was better to get the domestic side of the business up and running, troubleshoot the wide-scale rollout, and focus on publicity and vendor relations rather than send part of the team halfway around the world.

At first, Amy found it a bit overwhelming to have so much money at her disposal. Joe had donated the money to JustLife, and then given Amy operational funding control through the organizational structure. Initially, she found herself reporting to him on expenditures, out of courtesy if nothing else. But Joe consistently encouraged her to do what she needed to do, insisting on no more than one vote on the executive committee. Their first major expenditure was renting office space, decorating, and purchasing the servers for the website. The building they rented would say a lot about their organization, so they chose carefully. They were limited by the availability of high-bandwidth internet connections, as well. Finally, they decided upon an older house owned by a retired couple in West Seattle. The property had been used for office space before, but it needed some redesigning for their purposes. They only used owner-operator contractors to do the work, with Dawn directing the purchase and installation of the necessary electronics and wiring. The rest of the team contacted their vendors for furniture, floor coverings, and a few decorations. Joe's printing contact handled the signage. Amy worked as the general contractor, making sure that the appropriate permits were obtained, then making sure the work was done to the most knowledgeable team member's expectations. After about three weeks, as the five of them were standing on the street looking at their new office, Just Life was starting to seem real. Now that they had actually completed this first tangible step, somehow it made the rest of this daunting project seem more feasible.

The next task was the website and e-commerce setup. Dawn was working furiously, with regular input from the rest of the team, to make sure that all the content was correct and appealing, and that the website's operation was foolproof. Furthermore, she had her e-commerce setup verified by the appropriate outside entities, had her security repeatedly challenged by a hacker friend, and made all the payments for their office supplies through the website to be sure the system worked correctly. As the next stage of development, the five friends agreed to make as many of their own purchases through JustLife as possible, and they discussed the speed of arrival and quality of products at their weekly meetings. It was decided that the vendor agreements needed to allow immediate dismissal for quality, timely delivery, or failure to fill orders. Since JustLife was serving as a clearinghouse, each one of the dozens of vendors could damage the organization's reputation with poor quality or customer service. Mai volunteered to take charge of the customer satisfaction function, and Dawn established electronic tracking of orders and complaints to be available through Mai's satellite phone so she could resolve customer problems no matter the time or location.

Now that the infrastructure was in place, it was time to fill the vendor roster. The team divided up to meet with the people that had already expressed an interest to Mai. At this point, Amy and Ed had worked with most of these people through the farmer's markets in the area. They explained the wide audience they envisioned with JustLife, and the necessity of promptly delivering a high quality product each time. Amy examined the financial records of each company, especially making sure that employees and vendors were treated fairly. Again, any unjust activity by one vendor, if publicized, could cast the whole organization in a bad light. Occasionally, Mark and Joe would make a secondary investigation, if Amy saw something questionable in the financial records. They were disappointed to find that some people with whom they had worked for years did not meet Just Life's ethical standards.

One important result of their investigation was the realization that most of their vendors could only produce a small number of items at a time. Furthermore, these family-run operations rarely had the capital or extra hands to increase their production substantially, even if they received a large volume of orders at one time. Dawn redesigned the website to allow each vendor to activate or inactivate each one of their products independently, based upon what they could ship that day. The vendor responsibility for managing this was incorporated into the agreement. They realized that this would have the effect of changing the JustLife inventory all the time, encouraging customers to come back repeatedly to see what's new. They decided to play this up when they started promoting the business.

They constantly searched out craft and trade magazines, websites, and blogs to let potential vendors know about JustLife. Amy made it a rule not to travel to a city until there were at least five vendors available, to keep travel expenses under control. This had the effect of encouraging artisans to get their friends involved, as well. They decided to make an all-out effort to encourage the famous Amish craftspeople to make their wares available through JustLife. They were the perfect vendor for this project, and, after a couple of visits, they agreed to join. Several monasteries, that supported themselves through making things from foodstuffs to inkjet cartridges, were also eager to participate. The increasingly diverse group of products constantly challenged Dawn and the team to keep the website clear and uncluttered, yet comprehensive. So much work had been done already, but the company hadn't even begun operations.

Finally, it seemed like they were ready to go online. They notified all their vendors, encouraging them to purchase from each other through the JustLife website. At first, they were almost overwhelmed by the volume of small glitches in the system. Mai was on the phone constantly, and tempers got a little short, but Dawn was able to promptly correct the technical problems as they arose. This limited rollout with such an understanding group of customers turned out to be a pivotal decision. Later, when customers who were unaffiliated with JustLife started to use the website, this "debugging" process ensured that their experience was mostly seamless.

Dawn hired a friend with expertise in search engine optimization to get web exposure based upon their individual products. They decided to use billboards and paid articles in local Seattle magazines to announce the presence of the entire company. Business started to trickle in. Dawn and Mai worked together to follow up on each early customer's transaction experience, and they were pleased to see repeat business. Some people didn't understand what they were trying to do, but most seemed to be very enthusiastic about the concept and the products. Early on, some JustLife vendors had to be eliminated due to quality or order fulfillment problems, but Mai would go shopping herself and hand-deliver replacements for products with which customers were unsatisfied. They realized that word of mouth would be their most effective means of growth, and the team committed to doing whatever they had to in order to meet customer expectations.

Joe started calling local media contacts, telling the story of JustLife. He thought that their unique idea would pique someone's curiosity, but he was having a hard time getting an interview. He would encourage each contact he made to try a JustLife product, but seemed to have few takers. Finally, a consumer specialist at a local television station, thinking the whole thing was a scam, anonymously ordered five products from different vendors. He then used the packaging to contact and secretly interview the people who had made those products. He was surprised to find that the whole thing worked just as Joe had said it would. He went from skeptic to fan following those interviews. He did his segment on the evening news on this new purchasing concept, JustLife. Furthermore, he started encouraging his producer to do a more in-depth look at the company. The due diligence the team had done setting up the enterprise paid off when this investigation also showed JustLife to be exactly what it claimed. Joe told the team when the segment was going to air, and they hoped for a spike in orders. So far, the lackluster sales had not only been a disappointment to the team, but several of their vendors had threatened to leave if they did not see an increase in business soon.

The financial status of the venture was also disappointing. Although Amy had plenty of ready cash from Joe's donations, they had yet to break even on actual operations. Joe continued to pay Mark from his own funds, and the rest of the team had agreed to work for the same salary they had earned previously. Mai was, under protest, paid the average of Ed, Amy, and Dawn's salaries. Since they took no percentage of sales for their operations, covering Just Life's costs would have to come through contributions, as they had planned. A few vendors, who had been busy from the beginning, had made donations, but they weren't even close to meeting their monthly expenses. The accountant in Amy was distressed about all this red ink. They were tempted to start taking a percentage on each sale, but felt that this would violate the core beliefs of JustLife. They would continue operating from their reserves, hoping that business would somehow increase. They were doing everything that they could for the company, but the results were, at times, discouraging.

The news segment was a turning point for the company. Suddenly, orders started pouring in. Fortunately, they had already worked out most of the bugs in the system, and many new customers commented that this was their best e-commerce experience ever. Mai had written a note that explained that the money that a customer spent went entirely to the person who made the product. The expenses associated with bringing those products to the public through JustLife were entirely funded by donations. This note was given to each vendor to put in the box with their products, and most complied. Finally, a steady stream of donations started to come in, primarily from people who, like Amy and Ed, decided to use JustLife as their primary source of merchandise. They were surprised to find that many of the customers wanted to thank the person who had made or grown their product, so Dawn added a "thank your craftsperson" function that allowed the customer to send a thank you note through the website to the person who made their item. In a way, it was becoming a digital farmer's market, with a certain sense of community replacing the impersonal, or even hostile, typical shopping experience. Occasionally, Mai would receive a complaint from someone about their "high prices." Mai would patiently explain that the vendors set the price for their own products, and that these prices were based upon the vendor earning the kind of living the caller enjoyed from their work. Most people had not thought of pricing in this way before, but could see the intrinsic justice in it. A few got angry and accused Mai of "gouging" them. Her kindness to them, despite their abrasiveness, seemed to make an impression, however. Several of these previously angry customers later emailed that Mai's gentle answers to their hostile initial objections had won them over.

Not everyone could afford JustLife prices, and there were many products they could not offer. But local big-box retailers noticed a drop in business after a while, and were not pleased with the inroads JustLife had made. Their advertising departments started targeting the Seattle market with ads touting very limited examples in which their products had made the lives of their employees better. This effort did not have the desired result. Instead, it got more of their customers asking about the quality of life of the people who made their products. When people started thinking in this way, it usually would lead them to buy a greater percentage of their purchases through Just Life. Finally, the project seemed to have reached the point at which the five founders could consider it self-sustaining.

Amy glowed with pride as she announced at the weekly meeting that they had finally covered expenses through donations. They were also able to rejoice in stories of success from artisans who had previously lived hand-to-mouth for many years. The latest challenge was keeping up with new vendor applicants, some of which were legitimate, but many of whom were trying to hide the fact that they were resellers of products made in unethical conditions. These people were blacklisted in the vendor database, so they could not waste more JustLife investigative resources with a new scam.

Joe decided that he wanted to put forward the TV project again. He and Mai decided to pitch it together the following week. So far, JustLife was falling into the domestic-only path of least resistance that the two of them had predicted. It was time to get out of the comfort zone and reach out to the rest of the world.

The next week, after each team member had reported on the success of their part of the JustLife operation, Mai took the floor. In her gentle but cogent way, she upbraided the team for entirely forgetting about their mission to use American dollars to make things better in the rest of the world. Everyone but Joe looked a little sheepish as she reminded them that the roadblocks that had excused them from the next phase of the operation had been eliminated, and it was time to take some steps to expand the borders of their operation. They knew she was right, and thanked her for reminding them of their commitments. Despite the high moral tone of the group, the youngest member had become the de-facto conscience. They agreed to come together the following week with plans to go international.

Ed was especially busy. He contacted local lawyers in Jakarta to investigate the ownership of the defunct factory near his parents' home, and began the process, with the help of Joe's lawyers, of setting up a joint American/Indonesian company to own the venture. Dawn started setting up remote, secure access for Amy to the company's funds, so that she could continue to be the CFO from Indonesia. Joe started interviewing the people who had applied for manufacturing engineer position he was trying so hard to fill. He had found one applicant who seemed competent, but when he interviewed with the whole team his inhumane, by their standard, view of production removed him from consideration. Friday morning, they had group interview with a second applicant, and decided to hire this man. He was available to start in a couple of weeks, and, being single and adventurous, didn't mind moving halfway around the world. His first day on the job, he and Amy had a preliminary meeting to talk about start-up costs.

The next week, the team agreed to fully focus on the TV operation. It was decided that Amy, Ed, Mark, and Mark's wife, Joy, would relocate to Jakarta to oversee the project. Mai and Dawn would remain in the US with Joe to maintain JustLife operations. They were reaching the point at which they would need to hire a full-time investigator to work with new and existing vendors. Mark and Amy agreed to meet with applicants to find an appropriate person. The corporate documents would be available next week for signature from Jakarta, and the die would be cast. Their domestic operations had not been a serious challenge to Joe's wealth. But the TV project would financially tax them much more severely. Nonetheless, they decided to press on.

Mark had an interesting proposal. A charity with which he had worked in the past sold hand-manufactured products from around the world to its members as a way of helping poor people. He pointed out that folding that operation into JustLife would instantly give them worldwide reach and expand their product line. Dawn agreed to begin designing an international section of the website, and Mark agreed to contact that charity.

Ed went to work to get housing in Jakarta for the two families, and then he and Joe negotiated a purchase price for the now-abandoned factory in which he and his parents had previously worked. Joe decided to fund the factory purchase from a second donation of his own money. Furthermore, their production engineer had given them some ideas on the costs for machinery and materials for the TVs, so he made a third donation to Amy to cover those estimated expenses. He decided to encourage his personal portfolio investor to get a little more aggressive. He did not want the project to fail for want of money.

Mark's plan turned out to be a challenge. The other charity did make a little money from each purchase of foreign goods, and they were reluctant to give up this income stream. Mark was pleased to find that they had local resources in each country to both investigate the vendors and to ensure that those vendors got the full proceeds from their products, and that they had almost a hundred products from all over the world for sale. Mark pointed out that JustLife had greater exposure and repeat customers. Furthermore, he agreed to pay a one-time licensing donation for the use of these products, to let the charitable organization set the freight costs, to advertise the products on the JustLife site as a joint venture, and to split the donations coming from people who purchased those products evenly between the two organizations. With these concessions in place, Dawn was able to submit the redesigned website to the charities' board of directors for approval. The negotiations had seemed much more difficult than necessary, but JustLife was able to add a substantial international arm though this one move. This joint venture would up being a win for each organization. The charity was able to make a significant difference in the life of its vendors because of the great increase in sales volume JustLife created. JustLife got access to a whole new group of customers through its links with the charity. In the end, both parties were satisfied with the agreement, and looked forward to further cooperation.

INDONESIA

Joe chartered a plane, and the whole team flew to Jakarta to look at housing, the factory, and the general surroundings. Ed was so happy to see his family again, and he was proud to introduce Amy as his wife and to introduce the rest of the team to his parents. The squalor of the area in which Ed's parents lived brought home to Dawn and Mark the importance of their international efforts. The factory had fallen into disrepair, but looked salvageable. Joe signed the purchase and sale agreement with the previous owner of the factory, and they went into the city to set up banking arrangements and meet with their lawyers in person. Ed was glad his language skills came back as quickly as they did, since he was translating nonstop. They found modest housing and a serviceable vehicle, purchased both, and made the long flight home.

Dawn, Ed, and Amy paid off the leases on their homes, then Dawn, Mai, and Ben moved into Mark's house, on the grounds of Joe's estate. Mark, Joy, Amy, and Ed packed what belongings they thought they would need in a shipping container bound for Jakarta. They took a couple of weeks to get their affairs in order, and then said a sad goodbye to their friends who were staying stateside. They decided not to move their new production engineer to Jakarta permanently, but rather to fly him to Indonesia on an as-needed basis, and he agreed.

After the very long flight, and a week to set up their household and get over jet lag, the team assembled at their factory. They discovered that about twenty squatters had taken up residence there. They knew that the way they handled this situation would set the tone for the rest of their work in Jakarta, so Ed offered them work as remodeling laborers on the project. Their first task was to build housing for themselves on the factory-owned land. The Americans and Indonesians worked together to erect the buildings. Ed insisted that they break for prayers, that they follow a Muslim diet, and that they abstain from alcohol. He knew that, as foreigners, they would be carefully, but quietly, scrutinized. He didn't want to give any opponents of the project legitimate grounds to stop them.

Once this simple housing was constructed, Ed put his new crews to work removing debris from inside the factory and burning it. They cleared the overgrowth that hand sprung up around the buildings due to neglect. The four friends decided to meet with every official that they could find, to explain their project and ask for help. They brought JustLife brochures translated in Bhasa Indonesian, and met with skepticism but not outright resistance on this impromptu goodwill tour. Ed moved his parents, with their permission, into the house next to his own. He hired them as consultants, planning on using their knowledge of the local citizenry to pick good employees. He was so glad to finally be able to help them in person, not just with money sent from halfway around the world.

Their Jakarta lawyer was able to put them in contact with a local contractor, who was willing, after some persuasion, to use Ed's motley force, at least for the manual labor involved in the remodel. They decided to remodel part of the building as office space, a conference room, and three hotel-like rooms in which out of town visitors could stay. The local contractor seemed knowledgeable, and Ed felt that his employees were treated according to the ethical standards of JustLife, so Ed gave him free rein to design the area as he saw fit, with an emphasis on economy. During this phase of the remodel, Ed, Mark, and Joy found that they could best contribute by helping with the physical work. Amy was even busier with her CFO responsibilities. It was hard to oversee such a large organization from such a remote location. One encouraging part of the project was its overall cost. Due to their use of local materials and craftsmen, they were well under the budget established by their engineer.

Once the living space was complete, it was time for their engineer to come get the factory set up. He looked around in despair at the dirt, useless machinery, and poor lighting and ventilation. Also, he worried that the electric service would be too weak for the task at hand. Ed started to take advantage of his parents' knowledge of local folks by hiring more workers. He could get all the manual labor he needed, pay an excellent wage by local standards, and still arrive under budget. Furthermore, his strong adherence to Muslim customs allowed him to attract workers with a high moral code and good work ethic, and gained him the favor of local civic and religious leaders. They built a cinderblock building to house the old garment-making machinery, as well as the raw materials for the televisions. Maybe JustLife would want to make clothing or shoes in the future. Ed worked as hard as he could to source the materials needed for the remodel from local small businesspeople. He even had a generator built from used components that would be able to power the whole operation from either petroleum or biodiesel, and took advantage of the strong sunlight by covering the roof with a powerful imported solar array.

Once the interior was opened up and properly divided, the appropriate machinery had to be purchased. This equipment, mostly, had to be imported, and was very expensive. They had to purchase plastic molding devices, a clean room for circuit boards and screen controls, glass cutting, packing equipment, and a myriad of other complex devices, with their associated controls. They decided to make as many of the television's internal components as possible, trying not to outsource things such as circuit boards and power supplies. In fact, their production engineer almost quit in despair, when he saw how much manufacturing they actually wanted to do on the televisions. He was used to companies that were really assemblers, not manufacturers. But he rose to the challenge, and they moved on with the remodel. Ed had hoped that they would be able to avoid using unjust supplier, but he didn't realize how difficult finding JustLife compatible raw material sources would be. For instance, he could not find anyone that would make glass screens in an ethical way. He finally decided to assist a local glassblower to start a glass-manufacturing business that would supply the JustLife TV plant.

Joe had made an excellent decision hiring this production engineer. They knew the quality of their product, and initial efficiency of their process, would be limited only by this man's skill. As they watched the factory take shape, and the myriad of design and production challenges that had to be constantly overcome, the Jakarta team was very satisfied with this man and his work. When he pronounced the factory ready to use, and local inspections were completed, the total transformation was a tribute to his skill and dedication. It was very clean and well-lit, with lots of windows and skylights. Its machinery and procedures met or exceeded American and European safety standards. It had tastefully decorated common areas for breaks and meals, and comfortable work stations laid out with an eye towards efficient and natural workflow. Joe was pleased to pay the engineer his agreed-upon price, including a substantial bonus which, Joe felt, was merited by his top-notch work. To familiarize the JustLife team with the process, they started out taking turns doing different jobs on the production lines. They had decided they would make TVs for all the common areas of the facility, as well as one for each of their prospective employees. This took several weeks, but it allowed them to fine tune the production process and ensure that each of them could make a television from start to finish. Ed's superior hand skills and manufacturing experience made him the top producer, but even Amy the accountant could put together a quality television by the end of their training. Their warehouse was by no means full, but it had a good amount of product locked away when the hiring process started.

Their plan was to structure the plant as a cooperative endeavor. To start, the team from JustLife would provide the management. As things developed, they hoped and planned that a true cooperative would develop, that the workers in the factory would manage themselves. Ed asked for his parents' advice to find people who were honest and hardworking, smart people who needed an opportunity. His team of squatters turned laborers would be their first workers. Mark had chosen a few for his security team, and had started them on physical training, unarmed combat, and marksmanship. Others would become the core of the maintenance staff. He had a couple who seemed like they would have the aptitude for assembly work. Over the next few weeks, they interviewed and hired about fifty people. They felt that their revolutionary ownership concept would be better shown than told. So they hired at a wage that would support each worker's family, a wage much higher than that paid by other multinationals. However, they did not initially tell their new team what kind of earnings would be available when the coop was finally operational.

Training was very difficult. Fortunately, Ed was nearly tireless, going from station to station helping the workers learn the complex processes involved in making the screens and electronics. Eventually, every new team member would be cross-trained on every other job, but for now just getting the TVs made was a struggle. Fortunately, he had the rest of the JustLife team to demonstrate as he explained in the native tongue. The first batch of televisions, made during this training period, was given to the local authorities. They were functional, but had more dead spots in the screens than would be acceptable in their retail products. Once the workers had learned the basic skills, they started running the various production lines, making small TVs that would work from various power sources and had integral tuners for the domestic market, and larger ones with or without tuners for export. Amy was going through money like water at this point, for she had all the operating costs of the operation with no income. Ed worked with a retailer in Jakarta to start selling their domestic units and getting an idea of potential demand. Amy let Joe and the team in the US know that they were finally ready for full-scale production.

Mai, Dawn, and Joe had worked to create some demand by offering the TVs as "coming soon" on the website. They actually had some pre-orders from some of their regular customers. But they needed to really get the word out to develop enough demand to make the factory profitable for its owner/operators. Joe decided to bring the reporter who had first broken the news of JustLife to Jakarta with the team, to see for himself this new way of doing business.

On their arrival, the four people from the US operation stayed in two of the rooms at the factory, while the production manager was back to check the quality and productivity of the lines. The reporter saw that the building looked like a typical warehouse from the outside, and that the generator out back created a little noise pollution. Inside, however, the bright, clean workspace was a far cry from what he expected. He was told that they would be able to sell the TVs at market price and retain these working conditions, because of the lack of paid middlemen. He interviewed the workers, and found them to be positive about their new job. He witnessed the ongoing cross training, the tasty cafeteria food, the breaks for prayers, and the regular workday. He was shown the agreements with local doctors to care for injured workers, and the pay sheets for the last few payrolls. He and the cameraman were given total freedom to film what they wanted, using their own interpreter. Joe was also impressed with the operation, and commended Ed, Amy, Mark and Joy on the fruits of their labor. Looking through the photo journal of the remodel, he was amazed at what had been accomplished.

Joe hadn't just been sitting on the sidelines, however. He had found a cooperative shipping company that would bring the TVs to the port of Seattle, bought a small warehouse to handle transshipment, and negotiated an equitable deal with the Post Office to transport the TVs across the country. This would be the first product manufactured under the auspices of JustLife, and he wanted every aspect of its manufacture and delivery to be perfect.

Back in the United States, the report filed was more favorable than they could have hoped. The bright and clean JustLife factory was contrasted with the squalid competition, as were the smiling faces and spare but clean and sturdy homes of JustLife employees with the squalid hovels cobbled together from trash that housed the competition's workers. This photo montage ended with a reminder to the audience that their purchases were driving one of the two systems. Joe didn't know at all that the report would be so favorable, but after it aired he paid the reporter to put together a longer version for the website. Their new tag line, "Buy a great TV, make a better world," resonated with the local, then national audience. The orders started pouring in, as did donations made by happy customers. Between the initiation of a revenue stream and continued improvements in efficiency on the line, the factory was making a "profit" after less than a year. They decided to hold their big announcement on the anniversary of the manufacture of their first television.

That morning, when the employees arrived at work, they were greeted by boxes and boxes of TVs in the middle of the production floor. Ed asked all the employees to gather around. He praised them for their hard work in restoring the factory and learning how to make high quality televisions. He told them how well their products were received in the US, and how they were opening up the domestic Indonesian market as well. He told them that they had finally reached the point that they were financially self-sufficient. Then he dropped the bomb. He told them that the JustLife team was turning over ownership of the business to them. Each person, no matter their job, would have one share of ownership in the company. New employees would get their share after three months of work, along with their own television. Anyone who left would return their share. When profits from operations were realized, they would be divided equally among all the shareholders. You could have heard a pin drop. Then there were smiles and shouts of joy as the worker realized what a windfall this could be for them and their families. Ed encouraged each of them to take a television as a tangible symbol of their ownership in the company. He was going to send them home for the day, but it was their first day of being truly responsible for themselves, and they wanted to work.

Over the next few months, Ed and the team mentored the leaders that had developed from the initial group of fifty. There was a learning curve to management, just as there was for production, but they had enough talented people that things were soon humming along smoothly. After a while, the new Indonesian management made some changes that Ed would not have made, but which worked out very well. He realized that they were ready to reach the full independence that the JustLife team had envisioned, so he and Amy took two weeks off to sightsee, while Mark and Joy went home to Seattle for a quick visit. Things went well, more or less. He got a couple of panicked calls, but the problems were resolved and the local management team kept things working smoothly. At the beginning of the coop stage, there were some quality problems with the televisions, because a few of the workers decided that they did not need to work hard any longer. But the damage to the profit sharing pool from delivering free replacement units impressed on everyone the importance of making a quality product. The American foursome agreed that the project was a success. They were sure that local authorities would be able to protect the newly well-off factory workers/owners, and they decided to go home.

Back in the United States, they were impressed by the organization and stability of a company they had only seen in its infancy. With Mai at the helm, the customer satisfaction ratings were off the charts. Dawn had made the complex electronic and programming processes transparent to vendors and customers, the highest possible achievement. Joe seemed to be courting Dawn while constantly publicizing JustLife, drawing ever more customers and vendors into their orbit.

When they got home, the Indonesian team was exhausted. Even in retrospect, the amount of work that was required to create one foreign enterprise from nothing had been staggering. But, when they got right down to it, they had helped maybe seventy-five people and their families out of billions of poor. Their joint venture with the American charity was helping people all over the world, but on a very small scale. After a couple of weeks to recover their energy and focus, Mai was again prodding them to reach out. This time, she thought that an effort to help closer to home, with a different product line, would be appropriate. She was thinking of coffee and chocolate from Mexico. She proposed that the growing and processing facilities be collocated in Mexico, and the finished products shipped directly from their warehouse in Kent, like the TVs.

There were groans around the table as the team members realized this would be the beginning of another arduous overseas task. But they also knew that this was the best way to spread the benefits of JustLife globally. This time, it was decided that Ed, Amy, and Dawn would stay in Seattle to supervise the operations in the United States, while Mark and Joy, who both spoke Spanish, Mai, and Joe would comprise the overseas team. Ed protested that Mai was needed to spearhead the customer satisfaction efforts, but the rest of the team knew they couldn't stop her from making her vision a reality, even if they tried. Ben was two years old, now. Mai thought about bringing him along right from the beginning of the project, but was concerned for his safety. Ed, Amy, and Dawn agreed to care for him for the first few months, and then bring him to Mexico when the initial stages of the project were complete.

# MEXICO

As with the previous manufacturing effort, their first step was a couple of months of planning. They discovered that there were family-run farms in the south of Mexico that raised both coffee and chocolate, and decided to locate there. They worked with a new set of lawyers in Mexico City to get the necessary permits, doing as much planning as they could from Seattle. Again, they were able to hire experts in coffee and chocolate production who would provide the technical knowledge required to set up the processing facilities. Furthermore, a retired Department of Agriculture inspector volunteered his services to help with food safety and preparation. Meanwhile, Ed and Amy were able to visit his parents again when they were asked for advice at the TV factory, and he made good on his vow to hold a Muslim wedding for them to see. During their visit, Dawn got little Ben all to herself for a couple of weeks, and thoroughly enjoyed the time that she spent caring for him. Ed's extended family greatly enjoyed the visit, as they celebrated both Ed's blessings and their own. Ed and Amy renewed their plans to bring his parents to the US, then flew back home. It was good to see the plant doing so well. The increased earnings from the cooperative ownership had already led to visibly better housing and health for the workers there. The plant leadership was strongly focused on growing the business, as well, by opening new local markets with appropriately priced televisions and even developing a secondary export market in Australia. This led to more hiring and greater local prosperity. Ed and Amy hoped that they could replicate that success over and over, around the world.

When the Mexico team boarded the plane, there were the usual tearful farewells. Dawn and Joe had grown close during the last year, and this parting was difficult for them. Everyone knew that this team was going into a situation even more undeveloped than the one faced in Indonesia.

When the team arrived, they were welcomed by the provincial authorities at the airport. Their documents were scrutinized, and then they and their luggage were put on a truck for transport to their new homes. After driving two hours into the countryside, they arrived at a clearing in the jungle that they would try to transform into a home and business. As in Jakarta, they engaged local workers to help them build acceptable, but primitive, lodgings in the local style, and then went to survey the area. They were warmly greeted, and Mark and Joy explained their plan to sell local produce directly to American consumers. They weren't sure if they were explaining their ideas clearly to the local citizens; until they pointed out that they hoped to prevent the chronic price fluctuations for cacao and coffee that made the income of local farmers so unpredictable. This brought cheers, and the Americans and Mexicans shared food, music, and dancing that night.

Breaking this project down into manageable steps, they agreed that their efforts should be directed towards developing a processing and packaging plant. The local farmers were already adept at producing these products; they only needed a way to directly sell their products to end users in order to dramatically better their situation. The team decided that they would investigate local production levels, and then build their processing facilities with four times that capacity. That would allow for additional production increases without any additional capital investment. As the plan developed, Mai pointed out that there would be a temptation for every farmer for miles around to convert to cash crops. As she learned from her own family, this would put their very lives at risk due to market fluctuations. They decided that their survey would also include an evaluation of the local diet, and a plan to encourage some of the participants to grow a variety of foods for local consumption, which would also earn them a share in the profits of the farming and packaging cooperative.

With their experts, the team drove to several local villages. For Mai, it was almost a homecoming. The details were different, but these small villages, dirt roads, and lush jungle scenery reminded her of her own childhood, and brought back good memories that were long buried. Often, the team was invited for a meal with the leading citizens of the village, so they could observe what foods would need to be grown for local consumption. They realized that providing good transportation would be important as well, since that would allow them to involve farmers over a very large area. The found a major river with dock facilities that could be used for transshipment of their products. They would buy a small freighter to carry their products out to the Pacific Ocean, then contract with a Mexican carrier with acceptable employment practices to get the products to the Kent warehouse. Near the dock, there was a small assortment of buildings that served as a general store for the area. They decided to locate their processing facilities here, so they would need to get title to that land. Their experts were able to draw up rough designs for the two processing facilities. They decided they would build apartments for workers in both facilities, a motor pool for their trucks, a generator building, and fuel storage and transfer. They used their GPS system to get the dimensions of the land they needed, then drove their experts two hours back to the airport, from which they could catch a flight to Seattle. There, they could work with Amy to order the necessary equipment and get it to the Port of Seattle. From there, the new JustLife shipping company could transport everything to Mexico. During the planning, Ed and especially Mai were able to use their knowledge of shipping to help evaluate the ships and crews that they would need. The other JustLife members were surprised by Mai's knowledge in this arena.

Even in Mexico, Mai stayed busy helping Dawn, Ed, and Amy learn her way of dealing with customer issues. Their database helped them decide whether a complaint was legitimate, but Mai was so effective at keeping their customers happy that they wanted to address complaints just like she would. Although Just Life's operations in Seattle had transitioned from start-up to maintenance mode, there was plenty of work for Dawn to do in vendor maintenance and technical improvement and repair. Ed and Amy came to appreciate all the work the team had been doing while they were in Indonesia.

After taking their experts to the airport, the team rented a vacation home in the region's capital city and got to work on their infrastructure problems. They hired a local lawyer named Jorge to help them. He had actually heard of JustLife before, and was excited about the project. He helped them begin the process of purchasing the land that they needed. He also put them in touch with the local branch of the Mexican oil company and, after some investigation, a shipping company well known for their excellent employment practices. Mark was able to negotiate a deal with the oil company that would allow the JustLife facility to buy and install a large underground diesel tank, which would be regularly serviced by an oil company tanker. The company even agreed to handle the installation of the tank, fueling facility, and pipelines. Jorge felt that the price was fair, so they signed the agreement.

Joe, Joy, and Jorge met with the shipping company. They were enthusiastic about bringing Just Life's products to the American market, since it would not require a new route, but only increase volume for a current ship. Joe told them that he was looking to buy a ship that could go to their dock on the river, and to hire a crew for it. They asked about the condition of the dock, and Joe admitted it was in disrepair. They agreed to sell Joe a ship and to contract with a local company to have the dock rebuilt. They would even use their own personnel resources to help find a crew for the ship. They saw the potential for this operation, and wanted to get in on the ground floor. Jorge was able to negotiate a mutually agreeable price, and they made arrangements to bring the initial shipment of material from the Port of Seattle to their new facility.

The whole team met with local government officials to get title to the land that they needed. They discovered that it was technically unowned, so they were able to get title to it, after agreeing to also pay the current operator of the trading post to "sell" it to them. Jorge advised them that the price being asked was a little too high, but that they should probably pay, since it would create goodwill with local officials. The deal was done, and they were ready to begin construction.

They decided to buy surplus army trucks to transport their goods from farm to processing center. They hired a mechanic from the city who seemed ready for an adventure in the bush, charging him with development and maintenance of the critical motor pool. He and Mai purchased a dozen surplus army trucks from another local official, then loaded them with spare parts. A local architect, also a friend of Jorge, was able to turn their experts' sketches into real plans. He agreed to get the supplies together and supervise construction of their facilities. Joe had to call home and liquidate more assets to continue this shopping spree, but with the success of their Indonesian efforts, they felt confident in their plans.

Jorge went with them back to their site, where he negotiated a cash price for the trading facility. The previous "owner" was happy to take his earnings and move to the city with his family, so the pieces were in place to begin construction.

Things got off to a great start as the oil and shipping companies built the dock and fueling facilities. Their trucks were delivered by their new ship, and the JustLife team got excited as their plans started to come together.

The rest of the project was very frustrating. Being so far from their materials, construction would go along at a good pace, until it was discovered that some key piece had not been included in the current shipment. Then, they would move on to some other phase of development, forgetting that the last step was not entirely complete, and then wind up repairing a new building that was missing the late-arriving component. In the midst of this discouraging process, each team member seemed to take turns helping the others stay positive. But it was Mai, with her carefully cultivated sense of detachment, was the most helpful in encouraging the other members of the Mexico team amidst all of these setbacks. Local folks would come by from time to time to examine the project. With the dock and all the large buildings, it was surprising that they were most interested in the trucks and motor pool. No one was able to explain this disproportionate interest in the trucks. When local folks would visit, Mark and Joy became the "public relations" team, telling about their plans to ship finished products, not raw materials, directly to the United States, thus increasing the income of area farmers.

Finally, it was time to bring their experts and equipment into the processing facilities. By this time, the dormitories, generator building, market, warehouse and motor pool were complete. The two processing plants were empty shells ready to be laid out. This part of the operation went much more quickly. Their experts had reviewed their plans and equipment on the way upriver, and they worked nonstop placing each component, testing the production flow, then building what was needed around the equipment. As in Indonesia, the JustLife team became the first workforce, starting with local produce and ending with bags of roasted and ground coffee and chocolate for baking, in syrup, as a powder, and in bars. They decided their chocolate would say, "Invented here, copied everywhere," as a tribute to the ancestors of the local farmers. Their products didn't go to waste. They took a portable generator and a coffee maker on their next trip through the local villages. Most of the folks they met had never tasted the processed results of their labor, and they were impressed. The JustLife team offered a tour of the processing facilities to the local farmers that they met on this goodwill tour, and a date was set to pick up the interested farmers and bring them to the facility.

The date arrived, and JustLife trucks went out into the countryside and brought many farmers to see the facility. They were very interested in learning how their raw materials were turned into tasty products. Mai spoke to them and shared her vision of a self-sufficient community that grew not only the supplies for the factory, but also all the food that they needed for their daily lives. They also made an appeal for people to come work in the processing plants. They explained that everyone working on the project would share in the sale price of the goods. The farmers present seemed interested, but they were not sure if they would have enough workers to make the project viable.

A few days after the farmers returned home, they found out why the trucks were so interesting to local people. In the afternoon, a motley collection of armed thugs roared into the compound. Joe and Mark went out to meet the leader, who offered them a "business" deal. He was a large man, with a bushy beard, motley military dress, and a gold tooth in the middle of his mouth. He claimed to have exclusive rights to all trucking in the region surrounding their processing plant. He saw that their business would be a great thing for the local economy, and he wanted a piece of it. He proposed to ensure safe transit for all their products for only fifty percent of their sales, and a substantial cash gift. He mentioned his concern that bandits might disrupt their shipments, or even damage their facilities, if he was not contracted to assist them. He pointed out that, since they were foreigners and did not understand how things worked; he would give them forty-eight hours to consider his generous offer. His thugs shot up one of their trucks on the way out.

The destroyed truck was a grim reminder how months of planning and hard work, and thousands of dollars, could be destroyed in a few minutes by hoodlums. Clearly, they had the resources to destroy the entire facility. The JustLife team suddenly realized why local folks had been so reluctant to join their cause. They weren't just going to roll over, however. Mai called the Seattle team, who ensured that the necessary cash was available. Joe, with Joy interpreting, called their contact within the local government, and found out that this thug, who the team had taken to calling "Gold Tooth", had gained effective control of the area in which the JustLife food processing enterprise was located through violence and bribery. When asked why they weren't informed of this threat, the official told Joe it "slipped his mind." Joe asked what he would do to help them, but the man was noncommittal. Joe thought about counter-offering a bribe to this corrupt official, but knew that their project needed more protection and stability than such a person would provide. He wasn't sure what to do next, and the thugs' deadline was looming.

Mark contacted Jorge privately with a plan to defend the factory. Jorge would see if he could get any weapons for Mark, and they agreed to meet in town the next day.

That night, they discovered that all of their local workers had vanished. Only their lead mechanic in the motor pool was left, and their ship was at the dock. Mark had not seen heavy weapons with "Gold Tooth", so he felt that the ship would be the best refuge for the team. He urged them to sail away upriver, and let him handle things, but the rest of the team refused to abandon him. So he got an agreement that they would stay put until he returned from town that afternoon. He drove like a madman to the city and met with Jorge, who was able to purchase a couple of AK-47s and miscellaneous handguns, with some ammunition all jumbled together in a cardboard box. Mark retrieved the weapons and the cash, and drove so fast that he practically flew through the jungle back to the ship.

That night, they were awakened to flames rising from the compound. Someone had set fire to the motor pool building. They were helpless as the building burned to the ground. Thankfully, the fire did not spread due to rain from the day before. They waited for "Gold Tooth" to return. Mark and Joe planned to meet him again, and Joy was nearly hysterical with worry. She had known that Mark had a dangerous job, but it had never intruded on their lives before. This was the first time that she had seen him going into mortal danger, and she was afraid that she would never see him again. Mark loaded a few of the handguns, showed the team and ship crew how to use them, and had them fire a few rounds into the jungle. He told them not to open the hatches for any reason, and to sail away if things went wrong. He kissed Joy, then he and Joe went down the gangplank to the dock and out to the apartments to wait for the gangsters.

That evening, "Gold Tooth" arrived in a cloud of dust. His jeep was in the lead, with a heavy machine gun mounted on the roll bar. Behind him were three trucks, similar to the ex-army JustLife vehicles that his thugs had destroyed the night before. About thirty men dismounted from the truck, armed with a variety of rifles, and formed a semicircle facing towards the center of the compound. One guy manned the machine gun on the jeep, and "Gold Tooth" and his lieutenant walked towards Joe and Mark as they emerged from the apartment building, Joe carrying a briefcase in his hand.

It was apparent that the compound was deserted. "Gold Tooth" mocked them, announcing that the deserted buildings showed that they were a bunch of cowards. Mark stood to Joe's right, playing the part of helper and translator. After his tirade, "Gold Tooth" viciously slapped Joe in the face. Joe looked at him steadily, and then the bandit leader reached out and demanded the payment. Mark started to proffer it, then suddenly threw the briefcase into the air. Mark then pushed Joe to the ground behind him, drew his pistol, and shot the bandit leader, twice, in the chest. Suddenly, a trail of fire snaked down from the roof of one building and the jeep was obliterated by a man-portable missile. "Gold Tooth's" lieutenant was killed by a sniper's bullet, and automatic weapon fire from concealed positions around the gangsters caused them to dive for cover. Mark had been hit in the chest a couple of times, and had fallen to the ground on top of Joe.

Nearly half of the bandits had been killed in the initial engagement. After a few minutes, when the return fire from "Gold Tooth's" men had tapered off, Mark raised his left hand and fire from the ambush ceased. He had holes in his shirt where the bullets had struck his body armor. Black suited troops came out of the jungle behind the remaining thugs and surrounded them, with assault rifles at the ready. Mark called on the remaining enemies to surrender. Most of them saw the hopelessness of their situation and started to set down their weapons. Two on the left flank raised their automatic weapons to fire, but were almost cut in half by gunshots from the masked troops. The remaining hoodlums, less than a dozen, were disarmed, cuffed, and loaded into one of their of trucks by the masked troops, who then took the bandits' weapons and trucks, and then drove off into the jungle.

Mark knew that the sound of the weapons would have scared everyone on board the ship, and he was surprised to see that it had not sailed away. He called Mai on his sat phone, to let her know that the danger had passed and that he was going to come aboard. He used the password they had established to let the people on the ship know that he had not been captured.

When Mai, Joy, the mechanic and the ship's crew came out on deck, they could see the jeep burning and bodies around the courtyard. Joy was crying as she rushed down the gangplank to meet Mark and took him into her arms, repeatedly kissing him. Mai calmly surveyed the scene, glad that so little of their enterprise had been damaged. She asked what had happened, and Mark told her that Jorge had contacted a friend in the national police, who had, in turn, contacted the elite Mexican national anti-drug force. With Joe paying for the deployment, they had parachuted sixteen troops and their weapons in at night, camping out in the jungle. Mark had guessed, correctly, that "Gold Tooth" was so used to intimidating through superior firepower that he would make the mistake of deploying the same way twice. When he did, Mark was able to spring the ambush. Only two of the Mexican troops had been injured in the lopsided battle, and they were able to be patched up by the battlefield medics from their own units. Joe was sore, and couldn't hear very well, but was otherwise none the worse for wear. He hugged Mark, and thanked him for his courage and protection, then couldn't stop hugging the rest of the team. He was just glad to be alive.

This misadventure pointed out something that they had overlooked in the past. Oftentimes, injustice didn't just happen. It persisted because some people benefitted from it. In this case, "Gold Tooth" and his bandits, as well as the corrupt authorities that accepted their bribes, had benefitted from the reign of terror that had kept the good people of this area from reaping the just deserts of their hard work. Paying such a large percentage of their sales for "trucking", which really amounted to protection, had kept them impoverished, without any visible means of escape. Fortunately, these bandits had killed off the local competition. When Mark and the Mexican army defeated them, there would be no one to step into the power vacuum for a while. Mark got Joe to agree to fund a security force of trustworthy men with whom Mark had previously served to protect their operation until such time as a local security force could be vetted and trained. They would enjoy the benefits of a full share in the coop, and would hopefully find that their best interests were served by protecting the JustLife organization from any new threats that might emerge.

The next few weeks were given over to rebuilding the damaged motor pool, and housing the new security force. Jorge had procured some replacement trucks, paying an exorbitant fee to the local governor who had "forgotten" to tell them about the bandits. Maybe, he would see that this new group was his most profitable ally.

Once the factory area was cleared and the motor pool was back on line, the next order of business was convincing the local folks to work with them. Mark and Joy took turns translating, but Mai was the one giving the speeches. She brought photos of the compound that they had built, and told each village about the project's goal, to provide a steady source of good income for the whole community. She told them, briefly, about the work that had been done already, how close they were to becoming operational, and the financial contribution that Joe had made. She asked Mark to give each member of her audience a chocolate bar processed in the Just Life factory. Mai would tell her audience that she herself had grown up in a small village, and knew what it was like to have few opportunities. She had seen people do desperate things to make a better life for themselves. But here, they had an opportunity to help themselves. She told them about their plan to produce valuable finished products, not less-valuable raw materials, and sell them directly in the United States. She also talked about the plan to grow, not just cash crops, but food for everyone in the area. She also pointed out that there would be lots of different kinds of work, not just agriculture but also manufacturing, packaging, shipping, materials handling, trucking, security, and many other tasks. Wherever they went, they recruited volunteers for the factory, showing pictures of the housing and leaving battery-powered phones in each village so that workers could call their parents. By the time they returned to their compound by the river, they had enough workers to get up and running.

They followed the training plan from Indonesia, with Joy explaining the process to the trainees, and Mark and Mai demonstrating each task. Since this was much simpler work, the learning curve was not as steep as it had been at television factory. Mai led the teams that went out into the countryside purchasing produce. Until they had income, there would be no profit sharing, so they just used Just Life funds to pay a higher-than-average price for outright purchase. Mai managed to convince some local farmers to switch to beef, corn, rice, and vegetables, for which she also guaranteed a good price. This would make the community self-sustaining. The warehouse started to fill up, and they let Ed know that they were ready to start shipping product. They decided to use the chocolate bars as a gift with any Just Life purchase, to get samples out more quickly. JustLife bought those bars from the coop at the initial price established by the Mexico team , thus creating revenue from this venture for the first time. Mai had led the recruiting drive, and she and Ben got to travel to all the villages that had produced the crops which they had transformed into chocolate bars, paying each person their share of the proceeds. This real cash helped to overcome the final reservations that the local farmers had about working with JustLife. The team could feel the people of the area coming together of their own accord, to make the project work.

As more Americans enjoyed the good products and good feelings from purchasing Just Life products, and told their friends, it was becoming faddish to have JustLife products in one's home. Donations from people who were neither customer nor vendor started to come in, and the team started saving for the next big project.

Following the pattern established in Indonesia, at six months the coop in southern Mexico was officially started. Mark, Joy, and Mai went from village to village, giving out shares and explaining the nature of the coop. As promised, the Just Life team prepared to leave the operations of the chocolate and coffee business to the local participants. Jorge, the lawyer, had become a key leader, as had several other early local workers. It wasn't long before the local JustLife leadership established a travelling medical and veterinary clinic, as well as a school, using only coop funding. The outside security force that had been needed at the beginning of the project had been replaced by local citizens, trained by Mark and equipped by the coop. They provided protection and fire defense not only for the factory compound, but for the surrounding farms, as well. They received an equal share in the coop, as did the farmers, truckers, seamen, laborers, dock workers, packagers, and everyone else in the area. On one of their annual visits, the Just Life team was pleasantly surprised to find a monument, shaped like a small pyramid, with each of their names on it, built in the middle of the of the production compound. It was a tribute to the team for the remarkable changes that their project had brought to the entire region. There were tears and hugs as they left. Mai was somewhat wistful, glad that they had been able to change these lives, but longing to do the same for her family in her own country. Well, one thing at a time. As they left Mexico after this final evaluation, the team was elated by their successes, but challenged by all the good that they could still accomplish by bringing Just Life's principles of compassionate consumerism to bear on the many other serious problems in the world around them.
