♪♪♪
>>> SO LONG AS MEN CAN BREATHE
OR I CAN SEE, SO LONG LIVE THIS
AND THIS GIVES LIFE TO THEE.
SECTIONAL COUCHES.
♪♪♪
WHEN I WAS A LITTLE BOY MY
GRANDMOTHER BOUGHT ME A NEW
COUCH.
I LOOKED AT IT AND I SAID WHERE
IS THE REST OF IT?
THAT'S THE FIRST OF MANY STORIES
YOU ARE GOING TO HEAR.
THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG.
WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THAT WHERE
MOST PEOPLE'S COUCHES END, YOURS
CAN BEND AND KEEP GOING?
♪♪♪
WOW.
KING ME.
NOTHING LIKE IT.
LEGEND HAS IT THAT, IN ANCIENT
ROME, THE EMPEROR ASKED FOR A
VERY LONG COUCH.
ONE THAT WOULD STRETCH TO
INFINITY.
BUT, WHEN THEY BOUGHT THEM THE
COUCH, HE GAZED AT IT AND
POWERFULLY SAID, "WELL THAT'S
NOT GOING TO FIT."
SO, THEY PUT A BEND IN IT, AND
THEY BUILT IT IN SECTIONS.
♪♪♪
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ]
>> HI.
♪♪♪
>> THIS ONE'S CALLED THE "BAD
LANDS."
GOD KNOWS WHAT IT'S STUCK WITH.
EACH [ INAUDIBLE ] BOUFF
UNFOLDING AND UNFOLDING FOR
ETERNITY.
THIS ONE'S CALLED "THE
GATHERING."
IT LOOKS LIKE ELEPHANTS GATHERED
FOR AN IMPORTANT [ INAUDIBLE ].
IT HAS A PHONE CHARGER AND
ELECTRICITY RUNS THROUGH IT.
REST YOUR TIRED HEAD IN THE
BOSOM OF THIS ROBUST GODDESS.
DRINK OF MILK?
IF YOU DON'T HAVE THIS ONE, LET
ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
THESE ARE ALL MADE ON EARTH.
BUT, ALL THESE COUCHES ARE
NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT I'M
GOING TO TALK ABOUT RIGHT NOW.
LISTEN HAD TO ME SPEAK.
THERE WAS ONCE A WOMAN NAMED
BARB SOMEWHERE IN RACINE,
WISCONSIN.
SHE WENT TO A COUCH STORE AND
SHE SAID --
>> BIGGER.
>> SO THEY SHOWED HER A BIGGER
ONE AND SHE SAID --
>> NO, BIGGER!
>> AND THEN THEY SHOWED BARB A
COUCH BIGGER THAN ANY OTHER
THING ON EARTH!
♪♪♪
AND SHE SAID --
>> YES!
YES!
I'LL TAKE IT!
THIS PIECE IS CALLED "THE
NEXUS."
IT IS THE EYE OF THE STORM.
THE REST OF THE SECTIONAL IS
BORN FROM THIS POINT, AND THAT
IS HOW THEY'RE MADE.
PERIOD.
♪♪♪
I USED TO HAVE A FAMILY.
WIFE SITS ON A COUCH HERE, THEN
SITS ON A COUCH THERE.
I LONGED TO CONNECT THEM.
SO, I BOUGHT MY FIRST SECTIONAL.
THEN I BOUGHT ANOTHER, AND
ANOTHER.
THEN A WAREHOUSE TO STORE THEM,
AND THEN A STOREFRONT TO SHOW
THEM TO THE PEOPLE THROUGH THE
WINDOWS.
THEN HE CAME IN AND ASKED HOW
MUCH ARE THEY?
I REPLIED, "GET OFF MY PROPERTY.
THESE ARE NOT FOR SALE."
AND THIS IS NOT A COMMERCIAL.
I GOT THIS AIR TIME TO SAY
PLEASE LET ME BE.
THIS IS NOT A COMMERCIAL.
GOOD NIGHT.
>> SECTIONAL SOFA EMPORIUM,
8259, SODA STREET.
NOT OPEN TO THE PUBLIC.
NOT A BUSINESS.
♪♪♪
