 
# Darkness Falls

## (Darkness Falls Series, Book 1)

## Jessica Sorensen

# Contents

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Epilogue

About the Author

Also by Jessica Sorensen

# Prologue

Rule #1—Never go out after dark.

Rule #2—Always have a weapon in hand.

Rule #3—No matter what, never EVER get bit.

# Chapter 1

The sky is black, the streets are full of cries, and my clothes are drenched with either rain or blood. Maybe both. I've broken a rule and the consequences could be disastrous.

Rule #1—Never go out after dark.

The sky is thick with smoke that rises from the fires constantly burning within the city walls. The broken buildings, lost in the dirt of disease, tower the sides of the debris-covered roads. Abandoned cars thick with rust and fragmented glass wedge the streets. I leap over the hood of one and swing a sharp right, dipping down into the underground tunnels, away from the dead city, away from _them_. But a hand grabs the collar of my shirt and I'm yanked backward.

My weapon slips from my fingers and clanks to the ground.

Another rule broken.

Rule #2—Always carry a weapon.

The monster snarls, fangs gleaming, drool dripping from its rotting lips. I squirm from its grip and dodge to the right, but another one appears, just as hungry. I'm cornered. I press my back against the concrete walls soaked with filthy water, which seeps deep into my clothes.

This is the closest I've ever been to one. My amazing speed and quickness makes it hard for them to catch me. Tonight, I'm off though. Tonight, I'm worried about Maci.

It's as dark as death, but I can still make out the blood dripping from the monsters eyes and the gaping wounds mapping its flesh. Its fangs tremble for my neck, desperate to devour—needing to feed. I search the ground for my weapon—I need my weapon.

But it seizes me by the shoulders and digs its fleshless fingers into my arms. My skin starts to give. If it breaks, I'll be infected. I should be afraid—I should fear for my life. But I don't.

I kick the monster between the legs, but it doesn't faze. Maybe it's not male? Male or not, I've pissed it off. It tips its head back and growls. Then its other arm springs forward and it clutches my throat. Blood pours from its eyes like rain from the sky. I ram my elbow into its chest, hard. But it barely budges. It's a strong one.

They all are.

And humans are weak.

It dips its nose toward my neck and takes a deep whiff, like I'm a top grade sirloin steak. I whack it in the chest and kick it in the shin, refusing to give up. Finally, it loses balance and stumbles backwards. Not missing a beat, I skitter around it and swerve around the other one. Then I run.

But I fall after a few steps, my nose cracking against the concrete. I roll over and the monster hovers above me. The more blood that drips from its eyes, the hungrier it is. And this one's eyes are pouring water like a rainstorm. It assesses me, death staring me in the eyes. Yet I am not afraid. I should be terrified, but I never am.

The monster's lips part. "No!" It cries.

My blood freezes. I've never heard one speak. I didn't think they could speak.

It turns from me and wanders back down the tunnel, the other one following closely behind.

I stay on the ground, my jaw slack with shock. Because vampires never EVER leave humans alive.

# Chapter 2

After the vampires vanish, I sprint down the tunnel as fast as my legs will carry me and don't slow down until I reach the river. The Highers built the river around The Colony, and constantly dump sodium chloride into it, which is just a fancy word for salt. The salt causes excruciating pain when it mixes into the wounds on vampires' skin. It's the one thing that keeps them away, the one thing that protects us from being overtaken with the blood thirsty disease.

I jump into the water and swim until I grow tired. I let the soft flow of the water carry me to the end of the river. I drag myself onto the cement platform. I'm tired and soaked, but the glass vial is still in my pocket and that's all that matters.

"Open up," I call out, spitting out water. " _Please_."

The steel door swings open, and smacks loudly against the wall. Tristan steps out, hands in pockets, a shocked look on his face. "What happened to you?"

I push to my feet and ring the water out of my long, black hair. "Why are you guarding the door? I thought Bernard was on duty tonight?"

"He had some sort of meeting with the Highers..." His blue eyes skim me from head-to-toe and then his mouth sinks into a troubled frown. "I'm guessing everything didn't go smoothly."

I nod and step past him, ducking below the doorway. "The hospital we always get the medicine from was a mess... it looked like the vampires trashed it for some reason," I say, which sounds strange because vampires usually won't go near hospitals, but that's what Monarch told me to say if anyone asked. And Tristan won't question my lie. He is a strict rule follower and asking questions about things that might seem suspicious would make him a rule breaker.

"Anyway, it took me longer to find the medicine," I tell him.

"You say it like it's no big deal." He shakes his head with disapproval.

I pat my pocket. "I got the vial so that's all that really matters, right?"

He doesn't say anything, but it looks like he wants to. He shuts the door and it takes him a minute to latch the multiple padlocks and chains and lock out the Old World. When he's finished, he turns to me and touches his finger to my bottom lip. He traces across it, up my cheek, tucking a strand of my wet hair behind my ear.

My friend Nina told me that when Tristan touches me like this, it should send shivers across my body. I am shivering, but I'm pretty sure it's from the cold water drenching my clothes and hair.

"What's with the worry frown?" he asks, letting his hand fall by his side. "Did something else happen?"

"No, not really." I shrug and wrap my arms around myself as he unlocks the last steel door, "I'm just a little shaken up. That's all."

The door clicks open and he steps aside, letting me walk in. "Over what?"

"The vampires," I say. "It's not a big deal or anything, but one of them caught me."

He drops the keys, and they clank against the floor. "Dang it." He swipes up the keys and blinks at me. "How can you say that so calmly? I mean, they caught you. How are you even..." He lets out a breath, not finishing.

"It really isn't that big of a deal," I lie. "And I managed to knock it down and get away, so let's not blow it out of proportion."

"I don't think you should go out by yourself anymore," he says firmly

_Tell that to Monarch._ "I'm not a helpless girl," I say with a hint of humor. "I mean, I did manage to get away all by my little old self."

"Yeah, I guess." He eyes me over. "Something else happened, though... I can tell."

I run my fingers through my wet, tangled black hair. "What do you mean?"

"I can see it in your eyes..."He presses his lips together, eyeing me carefully with his blue eyes. "Something else is bugging you."

I could tell him—spill out all the details that happened.

Tristan locks up the last of the doors and we head through the entryway, which is lit up with flickering lights that struggle to stay powered on. The brick walls and low arch ceiling have worn away with time. The cobblestone floor has water rivering the cracks and the damp air clings to my clothes.

There are two Watchers standing nearby, keeping all of us in order. They wear masks over the faces, so no one knows for sure what they look like underneath. I picture them a lot like the vampires, which is probably not accurate, but seems fitting. I've seen many Watchers hurt and even kill members of The Colony. The only difference is they do it to keep order and structure to our society, not to feed or infect.

"I'll tell you later, okay." Another lie for Tristan. I pluck a piece of dirt from his cropped blonde hair. "I need to get this vial to Monarch."

"Alright, Juniper, but I'm going to hold you to it." He flashes me a smile, trying to lighten my mood.

It almost hurts, but I manage to force one back and hurry to the hospital wing.

Juniper isn't my first name. Kayla is. I don't have a last name. A few weeks after the outbreak, Monarch found me wandering the streets. I was four and too young—or too traumatized—to remember anything, including my name. Monarch took the courtesy of giving me the name Kayla and decided to add the middle name of Juniper, after his ex-wife, because he says I reminded him of her. I'm not sure if this is a compliment or not. And I don't know why Tristan insists on calling me it or where he even learned if from. Regardless, I don't like it. There's something about it coming from his mouth that feels wrong. I don't want to bring it up to him though, because I don't want to cause problems.

Monarch's standing in the doorway of the hospital wing when I arrive. He's staring at his pocket watch as if it holds the cure to the vampire disease. He's the doctor of The Colony and a true medical genius. He can cure the sick, heal the weak, and sometimes even revive the dead.

"Oh, thank God." Monarch says when he catches sight of me. He's in his mid-fifties and is one of the older members of The Colony. His hair is the color of smoke and the corners of his eyes sprout crows-feet. His white coat is smudged with blood and the red marks on the sides of his crooked nose means he's been pressing his fingers there, something he does when he's stressed. "I was starting to get worried."

"You're always worried." I hand him the vial, my fingers briefly brushing his, and I catch a sense of something he fears, something small and lying in the hospital bed.

With a simple touch, I can sense things they're afraid of. Monarch fears for Maci's life—he fears she'll die and will no longer be able to fulfill her life's purpose. He also fears I'll tell someone he sent me out so close to dark.

"How's she doing?" I lean to the side and peer into the hospital room. Maci's lying in one of the beds. Her eyes are shut, and her tiny body is curled in a ball. Tubes cover her skin, pumping blood into her. There's a monitor beside the bed, beeping with every breath she inhales. She's sick. Not with the vampire virus, but with something else. Monarch was running low on medicine and since I'm a Bellator, it's my job to go out and retrieve things. Anything The Colony needs the Bellators get. Like medicine.

"Are you okay?" Monarch's grey-streaked eyebrows dip underneath his oval-rimmed glasses. "You didn't run into any problems tonight, did you?"

I shake my head. Maybe I'll tell him later, after he's given Maci the medicine and is less stressed. But I'm only lying to myself if I think I will. I never do.

"So no run-ins with any vampires?" His dark grey eyes focus on me. There's something about the way he stares that makes me question if he knows I'm different.

"Nope. No run-ins with vampires," I lie effortlessly, making me wonder how awkward the truth would sound coming out of my mouth.

After I dropped the vial off, Monarch shoos me away and tells me to go change and return to the hospital for my shot. Getting a shot is part of my daily schedule. There's something about my blood, Monarch tells me, that needs a daily injection or else I'll die. I obey Monarch because he's like a father to me.

I ignore The Colony members hurrying through the hall. Lost in my thoughts as I head to my room, the vampire's cry keeps replaying in my mind. I've never seen one release a human. On a few occasions someone gets bit, but manages to escape. But an escape never lasts long. Within a day after a bite, their flesh starts to rot, teeth sharpen, and eyes and mind sink into a fit of rage.

I turn over my arms, staring at the blue veins winding underneath my skin. Why didn't it bite me? Better yet, why was I not afraid? I had always thought, when I faced my death, I would finally feel fear. But even then, I'm numb. In a colony filled with fear, it's hard not to think I'm faulty. There's always so much looming in the air, mostly instilled by the Highers. They make people skittish. I try to play the part, play the fearful Colony member, but I get the feeling the Highers are catching on to me, which is bad. Fear is important to the Highers, otherwise how would they maintain their order and control?

Then, as if I'm cursed, I cross paths with one of them: A Higher. He's dragging a boy named Bernard, who's a Bellator and was supposed to be on Guard at the doors tonight. He's fifteen, two years younger than me, but much larger in size. His moppy brown hair curls over his brown eyes and he always wears this chain around his neck. He told me once that on the metal plate, attached to the chain, his name is engraved. But I called his bluff because reading, and knowing how to read, is prohibited in The Colony.

The Colony members flee to the side, bowing their heads, fear lashing off them, poisonous and potent. Following the rules, I step to the wall and bow my head, showing my respect to the Higher. But deep down, all I want to do is kick him in the shin.

My gaze stays on his white shoes as he walks by me. When I think he's gone, I tip my head back up. Then I wish I could run.

All the Highers look the same, dressed in white, with identical white hair that flows to their shoulders like feathers. Their snow-white skin carves their flawless features and their pale eyes are haunting in a way that can make hearts skip beats. This Higher's gaze is on me and he's looking at me as if he's trying to burn inside my head and read my thoughts. I know I should bow my head back down and stare at the floor. Perhaps it would salvage this horrible situation of looking at him without permission. But I can't seem to look away.

His eyes warn me that I should be afraid, but I'm not. A little worried, perhaps. But afraid? No.

Bernard's face, glossed with tears, begs me to help him. And I want to. Desperately. Because whatever is waiting for Bernard isn't good. People that get dragged away by a Higher are rarely seen again.

"Tell me," the Higher says, in a thick voice. "What's your name?"

My first instinct is to lie. But lying would reveal my flaws. And Highers hate flaws.

"Kayla." My voice smoothes out like honey. Thank God.

His expression is impeccably unreadable. "And you're a Bellator."

I nod, even though it's not a question. "I am."

He presses his lips together and his gaze glides down the hall, at the line of people hovered against the brick wall, bowing their heads.

"Curînd." He whisks his white robe across the floor, turning and descending down the hall, towing a helpless Bernard with him. I stand as still as a statue, knowing that somehow this is going to come back and bite me in the ass.

After the Higher has disappeared into the hospital, everyone scatters like rats, giving panicked glances in my direction. Discounting them, I start for my room. Nina catches up with me, a spring in her walk, as she loops her arm through mine.

"What was that all about?" She whispers, her brown eyes wide.

I shrug. "I have no idea."

She swings around in front of me, her brown curls bouncing around her face. "Kayla, a Higher just spoke to you and you act like it's no big deal."

Nina's nice enough, but she worries more than I'm comfortable with and being around her for long periods of time nearly kills me.

"It's okay," I lie. "He just wanted to know if Monarch was in the hospital."

"Still, Kayla. He spoke to you, like actual words. That can't be good."

She's right and I know it. But I can't seem to work up any sort of fear about it.

"I'll be okay." I walk around her, calling over my shoulder. "I'll meet you in the cafeteria later, okay." Then I leave her and her worries far, far behind.

* * *

I can only remember one thing about the day I was chosen to be a Bellator. I was relieved. Most aren't. No one wants to go out into the Old World, full of bloodthirsty vampires. They'd rather stay an Adepti, which is everyone else besides the Watchers, Highers, and Bellators. They are the average ones, the ones that don't stand out, don't have to risk their lives. And they prefer it that way. They prefer the Higher's rules no matter how harsh they are, if it means living in the security of The Colony. And since the Highers built The Colony, they are the ones who have the power to make rules and enforce punishment against behavior they don't see fit.

Like for instance, looking one straight in the eye.

A cloud menaces over me as I get changed and return to the hospital. I'm all clean and sparkly and no longer smell of dirt, blood, and river water. My black hair is pulled back in a loose ponytail and I'm dressed in the standard colony uniform: black jeans and a black t-shirt.

When I arrive, Monarch is injecting a shot into Maci's IV. Her eyes are open now, her red hair a tangled halo above her head, beads of sweat dripping down her pallor skin. Maci's a Bellator too, but a newer one, and one of the youngest, rounding in at the very young age of seven. I blame myself for her being in here, although Monarch insists it had nothing to do with me.

Still, I was the one asked to watch out for her and ten minutes into her first session, she blacked out and smacked her head on the floor. I should have been watching her more carefully. The first session as a Bellator is the hardest because it exerts the body more than we're used to.

"Hi, Kayla," Maci says in a frail voice.

I pat her gently on the head, feeling a small connection with the kid because we're both orphans. "How are you feeling?"

She gives a small smile. "Better. Maybe I can even go back to my room soon and get back to my training."

I smile back, reassuringly, but I secretly feel sorry for her. The poor kid looks like death, and I don't think returning to her room, or to her Bellator training, is in her near future.

Monarch feeds one of her tubes with a shot of black liquid. I watch it drift down the tube, disappearing into her skin. Her heart rate slows until it's nothing more than a soft murmur. By the time he's finished, she's sleeping again.

I hop onto a bed and roll up my sleeve for my shot. "Stab away."

"Well that was a quick trip to your room and back," Monarch jokes, setting the needle down on the metal tray.

It is our little joke, my quickness. Because I'm fast—faster than any other Bellator. I return his smile, but barely. My thoughts lie elsewhere.

He takes a vial out of the glass cabinet, stabs the needle into the lid, and drains out the medicine. "So do you want to tell me what's bothering you?"

I scratch at my arm, wanting to tell him, but knowing I won't. "Nothing really. I just ran into a couple of vampires, but I managed to escape." This is as far as I go with the story. Any more truth and my tongue will start to burn.

"I'm sorry you had to go out so close to night." He flicks the needle, his fingers shaking with age. "If it wouldn't have been an emergency, I wouldn't have asked you to go."

I glance over at Maci. "I know."

"You didn't tell anyone I sent you out so late, did you?" He asks.

I shake my head. "Your secret is safe with me."

"I sure hope so," he mutters. He wipes my upper arm with alcohol and points the needle at it. "You know you can tell me if something else happened. You know that, right?" He says, but he's scared I actually will.

"Nothing else happened," I say. "I promise."

Monarch nods, looking relieved. "Good, I'm glad it went well. Sometimes I feel guilty for having to send you out." He sinks the needle into my arm.

"You don't need to feel guilty. It's what I was chosen to do, right?" My blood burns, my head sings, and the tile floor starts to sparkle. I lie down until my head stops humming an unknown tune. "Did a Higher come in here today with Bernard?"

Monarch tenses, his heart rate quickening. "You shouldn't be asking those kinds of questions, Kayla."

"I know," I say, unsure of why I asked it. "Sorry, it was a momentarily slip up. I promise it won't happen again." Another lie. I know it; he knows it.

"You've been doing that a lot lately," he replies tensely. "You need to be more careful."

"Have I?" I flop my hand over my forehead and block out the light. "So did something happen to Bernard? Was he punished?"

A shatter ripples the air. "I think you should go, Kayla."

I sit up. Broken glass and pools of medicine sprinkle the floor. "Why? What's wrong?"

Monarch stares at the fragments of glass and puddles of liquid. "Nothing. I just need to get this cleaned up." He bends down and starts picking up the glass. His fingers, worn with age, are trembling. I bend down to help, but he shoos me away. "No. No. I can get this."

"Let me help." I reach for a piece of glass, but he flicks my hand away, panic shining in his grey eyes.

"Kayla, this stuff's toxic," he practically snaps. "You can't touch it."

I eye the various colors of liquid. "But you're touching it."

He lets out a sharp, anxious laugh. "I've been a doctor for so long I've become immune to most of this." He's scared. Scared that I'll find out something.

"Monarch, what's wrong?' I ask, stepping back from the mess. I bite my thumbnail. "You're not acting like yourself. Is there something you're afraid of?"

"Kayla, please go." His voice is strained. "I've got too many things to do today to deal with this."

"Well, if you'd let me help then—"

"Leave now." His voice is as sharp as the glass. His eyes widen as he quickly collects himself. "Sorry, I'm just a little stressed. Why don't you go get something to eat and get some rest? I'm sure you're exhausted."

I'm hardly exhausted and he knows it. But since he obviously wants me gone, I back toward the door. "Alright, I guess I'll see you later then."

He nods, but he's not paying attention, picking up glass, lost in his troubles and fears. I pull the door open, but pause when I catch sight of a something silver and metallic. Bernard's necklace. I pick it up from the counter. Black shapes and lines cover the plate. I haven't seen words before, but I don't think these are words. No, they look like numbers.

I turn the necklace in my hand, over and over again. It shimmers in the light, reminding me of the time at Lessons when Bernard knocked out the instructor, but only because the plate reflected into his eyes.

I don't know what compels me to do it, but I glance over my shoulder, making sure Monarch's not paying attention. Then I shove the necklace into my pocket.

"Kayla, please go," He calls out with a heavy sigh.

"Sorry." I leave, obeying just like I'm supposed to.

# Chapter 3

I sometimes have nightmares about the day I was found. Although Monarch assures me it didn't happen this way. In it, I'm a breakable little girl with ash covering my skin. Fires roar up and down the streets and the air smells like burnt flesh. It's a toxic smell and I can hardly breathe. I'm hugging a doll, with blonde curls and a flowery dress that matches my own. I walk down the middle of the street, my black shoes crunching against the debris. There are vampires everywhere, in the buildings, in the streets, blood pouring out of their eyes.

In the center of the street, not too far ahead, stands a little boy with dark hair and sparkling eyes. I hold out my hand to him, wanting to reach him, wanting to save him from the vampires. I'm scared—I can feel the fear coursing through my veins. But I just walk, one foot in front of the other, determined to get to the boy. Then Monarch materializes from nowhere and snatches me up. He's wearing his white coat, stained with blood, and it blows in the wind like a cape.

"Shhh..." he says. "It's okay. I'll keep you safe."

Then the vampires charge. Their sharp fangs snap out, and the blood dripping from their eyes splatters against the pavement.

That's when I wake up.

I never get to see what happens next.

Or what happens to the boy.

* * *

I wake up drenched in sweat, the faint feeling of the nightmare lingering in my body. I'm not sure how long I've been out, but my stomach lets out a grumble. I climb out of bed and go to the cafeteria. There are too many people crammed in there at once and the air always stinks of all their fears and worries. Twelve tables hold at least ten people each and every single person looks peaceful and content with life. As if they are more than happy to be here.

Tristan's sitting at one of the center tables, talking with his parents. I'm hesitant to go over. Tristan's parents have this idea in their head that Tristan and I will end up together. The idea overwhelms me. Yes, Tristan is a nice guy and everything and being with him would probably be perfect. But I'm not sure I want perfect.

Besides, I'm a Bellator, so my life expectancy is short. Especially if I'm chosen for The Gathering.

I stand in the middle of the cafeteria, holding my tray, until his parents leave.

"So are you going to tell me what happened last night during your little raid?" Tristan asks in a low voice the second I sit down.

I set my tray on the table and take a bite of my boiled potatoes, keeping my voice hushed so the Watchers won't overhear us. "You've been sitting around, just waiting to ask me that, haven't you?"

"You have me worried." He smiles and gives my hair a playful tug. Then he lets his hand linger in my hair, twirling a strand around his finger. He's been doing this a lot lately, little touches whenever he gets a chance. "You looked like such a mess when you showed up at the entrance ... and you look tired. Are your nightmares keeping you up again?"

I shake my head. During a weak moment, I broke down and told Tristan about my nightmare. I've regretted it ever since because it's all he worries about every time I see him. But it's not worry for me, its worry for him. He fears the Highers will find out he's been spending time with someone who can remember when the virus first spread, even if it's just a nightmare.

I pick at the stale bread. "No, the nightmares have pretty much disappeared."

He looks thankful and takes a bite of his peas. "Good. I'm glad." He leans in close and puts his lips next to my ear. "You know I think you look beautiful, even when you look worn out."

I should be flattered—feel the shivers Nina talks about—but I just feel trapped by these invisible chains. I smile, hoping I don't seem fake even though my lips feel like plastic.

He leans back and fidgets with his spoon nervously. "Can you meet me tonight?" His voice cracks and he clears his throat, scared I'll reject what he wants. "There's something I want to ask you."

My body grows rigid. "I can't tonight. Monarch needs my help with something."

He frowns. "Well how about tomorrow morning?"

My insides twitch. I'm not ready for this. Not now. Maybe not ever.

He wraps his hand around mine. "Please, Juniper. It's really important." He flashes me a hopeful smile.

I stare at our hands, our fingers intertwined, knowing there should be more than what I'm feeling and wondering why there isn't. "Okay, I'll meet you tomorrow morning when I wake up."

"At the clock tower," he says, cheerfully squeezing my hand.

Not meeting his eyes, I nod. I stab my fork into my potatoes as the invisible chains are tugged tighter.

"So guess what I heard." Nina plops down on the bench across from us, a devious sparkle in her emerald eyes. "Hold on." She raises her hands in front of her dramatically. "I think I see something here." She points a finger at us. "Were you two finally confessing your love for one another?" She laughs. "It's about time."

My head pounds, choking away my oxygen.

"Yep, you caught us." Tristan yawns and puts his arm around my shoulder exaggeratedly. "That's exactly what we were doing."

I feign a smile, telling myself to breathe.

"Joke all you want." She grins. "But one day you two will end up together. I just know it."

Tristan squeezes my shoulder and gives me this knowing look. I should return the look. He's kind, obeys all the rules, and is a great friend. But he deserves someone who is perfect, someone that isn't me. He doesn't need someone who secretly dreams of challenging the Highers one day, someone who is so... different. I'm not the person he thinks I am. I'm Kayla Juniper with no last name, no parents; the girl that can hear heartbeats and is never afraid, but can sense when others are.

A girl even vampires won't touch.

Nina sweeps her honey-brown hair out of her eyes and starts chattering. But her voice is muffled as Monarch rushes into the cafeteria. He glances around frantically, searching for someone. At first I think it's me, but his gaze skims over me and lands on Taggart. He waves Taggart over with urgency. Taggart is the Mortician of The Colony and I rise to my feet, thinking of Maci and wondering if she's passed away.

I try to pick up on his fear vibe, but there's too much distance between us.

When Monarch sees me standing, he shakes his head and motions me to sit back down. Tristan and Nina are looking at me like I've lost it.

I sink back down onto the bench. "Monarch's talking to Taggart."

"Is this about what happened in the hall?" Nina asks worriedly.

I shake my head. "No, I told you everything was fine with that."

A pause.

"What happened in the hall?" Tristan asks, chewing his food.

"Nothing you want to know about. Trust me."

And he does, not asking anymore questions.

We grow quiet, my thoughts drifting to Maci. I'm almost certain she's gone. And in a moment Taggart and Monarch will take her lifeless body to the stoves, where she'll join the sky in a cloud of smoke. Everyone will forget her, just like they always do. Because no one likes a crier, no one likes a mourner. It distracts people from what's important and makes them do irrational things.

At least that's what the Highers say.

And the Highers are always right, even when they're not.

# Chapter 4

I hate death. Monarch has always tried to instill in me that death is just a part of life, and that I shouldn't spend time thinking about it. It's the one thing I can't get past. I hate death and that's that, especially when someone dies pointlessly.

Nina and Tristan are talking about their classes, when I abandon my tray and leave quickly, so they don't have a chance to ask questions.

I don't let Taggart and Monarch know I'm following them. I stay silent and duck into the shadows. I can hear them talking, hushed whispers, sounds I know were not made to be heard. When I reach the hospital wing, the door is shut. I shouldn't open it. Monarch's already upset with me and barging in is only going to upset him more.

But I do it anyway.

Another slip up. Another mark against me.

Monarch's eyes go wide as he rushes for me, pushing me out the door. "Kayla, what are you doing? You can't be here right now."

My feet stay firmly planted. "What's going on?" My eyes land on Taggart, leaning over the bed Maci lies in. Her eyes are closed, her skin pale, and heart beat missing. "She died? The medicine didn't help?"

Monarch's eyebrows furrow. "What? No, Kayla. Maci's fine."

I'm not sure what to think, since I can't hear her heart. But I can't point it out, since no one knows this little secret of mine. "What about you?" I glance at his unsteady hands. "Is there something wrong with you?"

He shakes out his hands. "My old age must be catching up to me." A pause. "Taggart was just helping me move Maci to a new bed."

"What's wrong with the bed she's in?" I ask.

"It needs to be sterilized," he answers, and frowns. "Kayla, what's the matter with you? You never ask so many questions. Is there something you want to tell me? Anything at all?" He leans in and lowers his voice. "Whatever it is, I'll understand."

I rub my temples, listening to three hearts beat, wondering why I can't hear Maci's. "I don't know." Sweat dews my skin and the door starts to bleed. I blink, seeing red. I rub my eyes and blink again, but I only see a red door.

"Oh no, not now." Monarch's words rush me as he trips to the cabinet and takes out a bottle. He quickly jabs a needle into it and sucks out the purple liquid. He moves the needle for my arm.

I pull back. "What are you doing?"

"Kayla, we go through this every time," Monarch says. "I'm not going to hurt you. I'm going to help you."

Monarch. This is Monarch. I let him press the needle into my arm and pump my blood with medicine until I can breathe again.

"Better?" he asks and I nod. "Good, now go to your room and lie down for a while."

I nod again and turn for the door, no more questions clogging my brain.

Monarch catches me by the shoulder. "Just relax, Kayla. I know it's hard, but I need you to keep it together for a little bit longer. "

I don't know what he means, but I no longer feel like asking questions. I open the door, but promptly jolt back, my shoulder bumping into Monarch's chest. A sensation of fear overwhelms me. Monarch's afraid for his life, afraid of not having time, afraid it all won't work out the way he planned.

The Higher walks in, his chin tipped up, an arrogant air in the way he carries himself. "A pleasure meeting you again, Kayla," It's the Higher from the hall.

Monarch's pulse misses a beat when the Higher says my name. His breathing constricts. His blood flow slows and I worry he's going to faint.

"I'm sorry, Gabrielle." Monarch's voice shudders. "I didn't realize you were coming here. I thought we were supposed to go to your quarters for this."

Gabrielle's pale eyes linger on me, before he narrows them on Monarch. "Evident, ai fost greşit."

"I know and I'm terribly sorry for the misunderstanding," Monarch says—I never realized he could understand their language. He bows his head. "I've just been so distracted lately. There seems to be more and more sick members to take care of."

This is news to me. I come to the hospital a lot and the only person I've seen in weeks is Maci.

"There are no misunderstandings," Gabrielle replies. "Only mistakes. And you know how we feel about mistakes."

"Yes, yes, I understand," Monarch struggles to maintain calm. "Again, I apologize for my mistake. It won't happen again."

"I've been hearing too many apologies from you lately." Gabrielle's voice is like ice as he strolls around, dragging his finger along the cabinet. "It's starting to grow tiring. And I'm not the only one to notice this. The other Highers have been making complaints about you. Some of them are even starting to question where your loyalties lie."

Gabrielle's eyes move to me and again, I get the feeling he's trying to burrow into my thoughts and see what it is I'm hiding in my head.

"Kayla." Monarch gently nudges me in the back. "You should go."

My brain screams at me not to. If I leave, what will happen? Monarch's made a mistake and the Highers always make people pay for mistakes.

"Kayla," Monarch's sharp voice slices my thoughts. "Go. _Now_."

As I walk out the door, I notice how far away Monarch looks. And if I didn't know any better, I would swear I can see him slipping away from me forever.

I don't know what I'd do if I lost him forever.

He's all I have.

Monarch shuts the door and I vanish down the hall, with the faint echo of a scream following behind me.

# Chapter 5

My eyelids flutter open to the brick walls that enclose my bed. I rub my eyes as I sit up. My mind is thick with morning haze and I can't remember how I got here. All I remember is leaving the hospital wing, and then nothing.

And why does it seem like I was supposed to be somewhere?

Dammit. I was supposed to meet Tristan.

I jump out of bed, yank on a black thermal shirt and cargo pants, lace up my boots, and run to the tower. His back is to me, head slanted up as he watches the ancient tower clock. The clock used to tell time before the Highers decided time was no longer relevant, since no one knew how to read numbers anyway. They ordered the Watchers to remove the hands of the clock. All that's left now are golden numbers that serve no purpose.

My shoes scuff against the dirt as I make my way over to Tristan. He turns, a grin spreading across his face and it hits me, like a punch to the stomach, the reason why I'm here. Suddenly, I want to run. And I almost do it; turn around and flee out of these walls, out of The Colony, disappearing into an unknown world.

"For a second, I was worried you weren't going to show." He's glowing with happiness like this is the greatest day of his life.

I take in his eyes, the brightest of blue, his flawless skin, his smile.

"You've been so down lately." He traces my pouting lips and I can feel his pulse beating through his fingers, sharp and vibrant.

"Have I?" I sigh, take a seat on the stone bench, and stare at the broken clock, wondering what it was like when time existed. What was life like when it ran on time?

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asks. When I don't answer, he takes a seat beside me. He tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Are you ever going to let me get inside that head of yours?"

If I did, we wouldn't be here. "I'm not sure you could handle what's inside there."

I've shocked him. His lips part as he starts to speak. Then he lets out an uneven breath and runs a hand through his blonde hair. "You know, you always look so sad, even when you're pretending to be happy. It breaks my heart, Juniper. It really does. You should be as happy as the rest of us are. I know you don't have the same life as most of us, with you being a Bellator, but choosing to be sad all the time. It's not worth it."

His thought process confounds me. "I'm not sad all the time. I have my happy moments." It's the worst lie I've ever told. "And even if I am, it has nothing to do with me being a Bellator. I don't mind being one." That is the truth.

But he doesn't believe me. He takes my face in his hands, his voice as soft as a feather. "You don't have to be sad, Juniper. I can make you happy, if you'll let me." We're so close I can see the specks of green in his blue eyes. "I want us to be more than friends. I want us to be together."

And there it is. It's like a chain has been coiled around my chest, and he's tugging at it. I can't breathe.

He's leaning in, his lips moving for mine, a kiss that will change everything, if I let it happen.

I lean back. "Why do you call me Juniper?"

He freezes, his forehead creasing. "Huh?"

"Juniper?" My foot's tapping madly against the ground. "Why do you call me that? I mean, what even started it?"

His face falls. "That's all you have to say?"

I'm crushing him; I can see it in his eyes. And I can't seem to stop tapping my damn foot. "I'm sorry Tristan. I just...I just can't."

He stops breathing, as if my words strangle him. He shuts his eyes. "I can make you happy." He opens them again, a sea of pain. "If you'll just let me."

I shake my head. "No, Tristan, you can't." They're the realest words I've ever spoke.

"I love you." His words are just a whisper of air and they fade with his breath as he waits, desperate for me to say it back.

But I can't. I can't lie this time. Not about this.

I stare at the ground. "I'm really sorry."

A pause, a skip of a heartbeat.

"I'm sorry too, Kayla."

Then he's gone, leaving me and my unfeeling heart.

# Chapter 6

I hurry to the hospital to talk to Monarch about what happened. I don't realize how worried I am until I see him. He's digging around in the medicine cabinet, his back turned, and there's a tiny red stain on the neck of his white coat.

"Thank God," I say. "I was worried that..." I don't finish, not desiring to say aloud what I'm feeling.

He quickly turns around, his hand pressed over his heart. "You scared me. I didn't even hear you come in." Then he smiles. "You know, you're getting lighter on your feet. That's good. The quieter the better."

I sit down on an empty bed next to Maci's. Her chest is rising and falling, but I still can't detect the murmur of her heartbeat. "So the Highers didn't punish you yesterday?"

He shakes his head and smiles, but his grey eyes are burdened. "No. I wasn't punished." He presses his fingers to the sides of his nose. "Kayla, I really wish you'd stop asking questions. There are so many risks, more than you understand."

I slip off my leather jacket, ready for my shots. "I'm sorry, it's just that..." Suddenly, I want to tell him everything. About my lies. About my fearlessness. About my ability to sense fear and hear heartbeats. About how I think there's more to life than The Colony, the Highers, and their rules. I want to, but I can't. It's like there's a wall around me that I just can't get over. "I'll try to stop."

"I don't want you to stop." He rolls up the sleeves of his jacket. "I just want you to wait until the time is right."

"I don't understand."

"And you don't need to right now," he says. "Right now, I need you not to understand."

A thousand questions tickle at my tongue, but I bite them back. "Can I ask you a normal question then?"

He hesitates, but then nods.

"Have you ever been in love? Really in love?"

He watches me, his eyes crinkling in pain. Then he turns away to sort through his medicine bottles. "You know, I never wanted children. It wasn't in my plans. I was too busy trying to change the world with medicine." He picks up small glass bottle, filled with the purple liquid and sets it on the counter. "My ex-wife did, though. She wanted children so badly. But I was selfish. I didn't want to sacrifice my own time." He chokes up, about to cry, and I don't know what to do. He never cries.

"Monarch, are you okay?" I ask uncomfortably.

When he turns back around, his eyes are blood shot. "She would have been proud to have you as a daughter. Anyone would." He pauses. "It's me she would have been disappointed in."

I'm not sure what he means. "I'm sure that's not true."

He fills a syringe with the purple medicine. "You wouldn't be saying that if you knew the truth," he says. I open my mouth, a ton of questions about to spill out, but he cuts me off. "I think we'll skip your regular shot today," he says. "We'll just do this one."

I tilt my head to the side, my long black hair falling into my face. "But I have to have my shot or else I'll die."

"I think you're finally ready to be okay without it." He looks like he's tearing up again. "It's time for you to just be Kayla." He gives a small smile. "Or Juniper if you prefer." I try not to flinch at the name as it painfully reminds me of what happened back at the tower with Tristan.

"This will be the last one." Then he pushes the needle into my arm, without any forewarning.

"What is this stuff?" I point to the needle sticking out of my arm.

"This is what will save you."

"Save me from what?"

"Yourself." He pulls the needle out and tosses it aside. He removes his gold pocket watch from his jacket. "I want you to have this."

There's something about the way he says it, like it's a finality. "I don't want it."

"Kayla," he urges the pocket watch at me. "Take it. It's important."

Holding back the water in my eyes, I take the pocket watch from his hand. "Why does it feel like you're saying good-bye?"

"We should always say good-bye, Kayla, whenever we part," he says, like the wise old man that he is. "Just in case something does happen. No matter what people believe, death is a part of us and we'll have to endure it one day. Even the Highers."

I open my mouth, then clamp it shut. I'm not sure what to say to his forbidden words.

"You should go." He directs his attention back to Maci. "I have things I need to get done."

I slide off the bed. "I'll see you again, though? Right?"

"Of course," he says.

Even though I'm an expert liar, I can't tell whether he's telling the truth.

I clasp my hand around the pocket watch, grab my jacket and head out, but pause at the door. "Bye Monarch."

"Oh and Kayla, one more thing."

I turn to face him and whispers of words surround me. I try to grasp on to each and every one, but I am fading away.

* * *

I wake up, later that day, in my bed. My head hurts and instantly I want to go visit Monarch. But I have Lessons this morning, so my visit will have to wait until afterwards.

The Gathering is in one day and there's nervous energy buzzing in the air. I can smell it, feel it, taste it, yet just glancing around, everything seems normal. People walk the halls, smiling, chatting, happy. Being a Bellator, I'm always in the running to be chosen for The Gathering.

Monarch told me once that Bellator meant warrior, which seems fitting. My excellent fighting skills, swift speed, and quick reflexes are why I was selected into the Bellator world. The exact details of The Gathering are a mystery. Those who are chosen find out afterward, during the final meeting with the Highers. The rest of The Colony remains in the dark and the memories of the chosen quickly get lost in the dust.

Lessons take place in the only room that doesn't feel like plastic. It smells of sweat and realness. It's the only place where I feel like I can be free. I take a seat by the chipped brick wall and stretch my legs out on the mat. Bellators pour in, dressed in their black warrior clothes, ready to throw down their lives if they have to.

Our instructor, Garrett, enters the room, his dark hair pulled back in a ponytail and he avoids looking at me, just like always. He's afraid of me, because I'm stronger than him and he fears that one day I'll take over his job. I hope not. The last thing I want is to be trapped in this room, teaching other people something that comes naturally to me.

Everyone sits in a circle, waiting for Lessons to begin. It'll be the last one with all the same people. There are two empty spots today, one belonging to Maci and one to Bernard. No one acknowledges the absence, but their spots stay vacant.

Garrett stands in the center of the circle, on the mat, arms behind his back, ready to give his speech about the responsibility of being a Bellator, like he always does. But today he's interrupted by two Watchers who come barging in, boots marching, noisily breathing through their masks.

"Hold on everyone," Garrett says and meets the Watchers at the edge of the mat. They exchange whispers and nods, and then Garrett returns to the middle of the mat, seeming extremely cheerful about something.

He clears his throat. "Everyone, our plans have changed for the day." He glances around at the circle of Bellators. "One of the Highers would like to join us."

It grows so silent that all I can hear is a handful of rapid heartbeats. A Higher walks in, white robe dragging on the floor as he walks onto the mat. Garrett bows his head and the rest of us follow.

"All of you can look up," the Higher says, his pale eyes skimming us over. I recognize his eyes because they've stared at me a couple of times. Gabrielle.

He latches his hands behind his back and paces the mat. "I know it's not normal for Highers to interact with the Bellators, but today is an exception." He pauses, letting his words linger with the importance he thinks they hold. "Someone has been keeping secrets from the Highers and needs to be punished."

He doesn't have to say my name. I know he's talking about me. Just like I know, in a few minutes, I'm going to die.

"Now, I'm sure some of you might have, at one time or another, thought you might be stronger than the Highers," Gabrielle says. "But, I can assure you, that's not the case. And I'm here to prove this to you and remind you all of what the consequences are if the rules are broken." His gaze travels to me, just like I knew it would. "Kayla, come to the center of the mat."

Everyone's eyes widen, but I remain tranquil, rising to my feet and stepping to the middle of the mat. Something dances in Gabrielle's eyes. He's afraid of me; he's afraid of what I am. And what I'm not.

"Vei muri în curând," he whispers, moving in on me like a preadator.

I raise my hand, preparing to protect myself. I hear a pop. A cry, but not my own. Blood. Blood everywhere, coating my skin, the mat, my eyes. Then an angelic voice rises through it all, telling me to hold on a little bit longer.

# Chapter 7

My body feels heavy. Lights flicker, my mind's fuzzy. I'm in the hospital, only it is bare and hollow. There's no Monarch, no Maci, no IV's. Even the medicine cabinet is empty. The room is blank, along with my memories of how I got here.

Clumsily, I stumble to my feet, my normal graceful balance fleetingly gone and I stagger for the door. But it's locked. Monarch never locks the door. Taking a deep breath, I tug on the doorknob, pulling and yanking, until the metal lock bends and snaps free. The hall is crowded, but I push past the people, moving swiftly for Monarch's room, toward the one person I know can explain things.

With every step, my strength returns to me. And by the time I reach his room, I feel like my old self, perhaps even stronger.

I bang on his door. "Monarch! Open up! I think there's something wrong with me!"

The only answer I get is silence and the conversation that fills the halls. I glance behind me, checking if anyone's watching. A few are, but oh well. I kick the door in and my heart sinks. All that's left of Monarch's disorderly room is the tattered brick walls and the frame of his bed.

"I don't understand." I mumble. "I don't understand any of it."

"Don't understand what?" an icy voice says from over my shoulder.

I turn to a set of pale eyes and a glare as deathly as the vampires. Gabrielle. A memory pops at my skull. Blood. Blood everywhere. Behind the red door.

"You seem lost." He smiles, but it's fake. Again he fears what I am. In fact, his fear has multiplied.

"Where is he?" I ask, knowing I've crossed a line I'll never be able to go back over.

"Where's who?" he questions with pretend mystification.

I clench my hands into fists, wishing I could remember what happened at Lessons. "Where's Monarch?"

His mouth grinds to a frown. "I see more rules were broken than I was aware of." He pauses, eyes narrowing. "Good thing it's taken care of." Then he turns to the nearest Watcher, lurking near the wall, giving a short thick man a zap in the back with his Taser. "Find someone to fill this room, after you're done with him."

All the calmness drains out of me. Without thinking, I reach out, snatch the back of the Highers robe, and throw him against the wall. Everyone in the hall slams to an abrupt stop, fear swarming the air like a wind storm.

"I think you're forgetting who you're dealing with," Gabrielle grits through his teeth. "Maybe you need to be reminded."

_"Not now, Kayla," Monarch whispers. "Not yet."_

My hand trembles and I blink back the water in my eyes. Then two Watchers seize me by the arms and pull me back. I try to wiggle free, but they tighten their hold. I never take my eyes off Gabrielle as they haul me away, down the hall. The Colony members scurry to the side, fearing for my death, but no one tries to help me.

The Watchers take me to a section of The Colony I've never been in before, one that weaves down, deep underground, where the sounds of traveling footsteps and voices can't be heard. Water dribbles off the rotting ceiling, staining the brick floor brown. The lights blink in and out of consciousness.

"Where are you taking me?" I ask the taller Watcher.

His breath through his mask is my only answer. These two are afraid of nothing, boots trooping as the continue lugging me. The end of our journey is a single door, bright red, like blood. I've seen this door before, in my head, and somehow I know whatever's on the other side of that door is potent. Because so much fear and chaos leaks from it, it screams inside my body.

I shut my eyes, knowing what I do next will either save me or be the end of me. I let my weight fall slack, dragging their arms toward the ground. One of them stumbles and clips their boot on an uneven part of the ground. I quickly shift my leg around and kick his out from under him. He releases my arms as he buckles to the ground.

The other constricts his hold on me, but I move fast, my hand dashing to his belt and robbing him of his Taser gun. I zap him right in the hip. His body goes rigid and he falls back, hitting the ground hard.

The first scurries to his feet and takes me by the hair. I move the Taser for his neck, nicking his skin and his arms stiffen, but he doesn't fall. I try again, this time pressing it hard into his chest. When he drops, he pulls me down by the hair with him. I have to pry his taut fingers off just to get free.

The air stinks of burnt flesh and I take off. But something pulls me back. I need to know what's behind that door. I pat the Watchers' pockets, looking for a key. When I don't find one, I decide to kick in the door. I raise my leg back, ready to kick, when the feeling slams me in the chest. Fear. Is this what my own fear feels like?

Someone lets out a scream and I swear the door starts to bleed. But when I blink my eyes, it's just a door.

Still, I back up, leaving it far behind as I run away, keeping my head down until I make it to my room. I put on my black sweatshirt and pull the hood over my head. Then I pack my knife and Monarch's pocket watch into my pocket. There's already something inside: Bernard's necklace. I leave it there and duck out into the hall, hoping no one notices me, the girl who just assaulted a Higher.

I head for the infirmary. Taggart is the only other person, besides Monarch, that might know what's going on. After all, he was the one in the Hospital when Gabrielle paid Monarch a visit.

"Taggart!" I barge into the dark room, with walls made of ashy stone lined with rows and rows of black stoves, some lit with fires. I touch the handle of the closest one, the metal hot against my skin. I start to open it.

"Kayla?"

I whirl, fist out, prepared to fight, but it's only Taggart.

The inhumanly tall man, with a slight hunch, looks confused to see me. "What are you doing in here?" He's glancing around fearfully, looking at all the stoves, fearing I might find out what's in them. "You shouldn't be here. Not today."

I put down my fists. "Have you seen Monarch?"

His expression tells me what I already suspected: Monarch's gone. "I'm so sorry, Kayla."

I stare at the stoves, at the flames inside that kill all evidence of life. I wonder if Monarch's in one of them.

"Kayla," Taggart starts, but I turn for the door.

He snags me by the arm, his hands shaking, and everything he fears spills out of him. He's afraid of death, of what he's done, and that he won't be able to fix it. "You can't go out there," he says. "You were supposed to stay in the hospital, but I guess you'll just have to stay here for a little while."

I turn my head to look at him. "Why?"

"Because," he struggles. "It's what Monarch wanted—needed you to do today. You need to stay out of the Highers watch for a little while."

"It's too late for that," I mutter. "I did something to Gabrielle."

His large face twists with confusion. "What do you mean? What did you do?

I try to pull my arm loose, but his bulky fingers refuse to let go. "You can't go out there right now. It's too dangerous—you're too unstable."

The next few minutes of my life are unclear, not because my memories leave me again, but because all I can see is red. But somehow Taggart, a man four times my size, is lying unconscious on the floor.

My hands are as steady as a rock as I leave Taggart and the infirmary behind. I leave everything behind in that room that smells of death. I walk the hall, marching for the Highers quarters—marching for Gabrielle. I don't know what I'll do when I get there, but I'm eager to find out.

I never do, though, get to find out because the sirens go off.

It's time for the Gathering.

# Chapter 8

People flurry down the hall like robots, rushing for the Corridor. I barely remember the last Gathering. All I have are foggy images of Bellators getting taken. I asked Monarch about it once, why I couldn't remember it. All he would say is that it's a part of life and that when people leave sometimes their memories leave with them.

Watchers, dressed in their black jumpsuits and army boots, herd the Colony members like sheep. I keep my head down, trying to blend in, as I weave my way to the Corridor, knocking into bodies.

"Kayla." Someone touches my arm and I whirl, ready to attack. But it's just Nina.

Her eyes widen at the sight of my expression. "Kayla, what's wrong? You look..." She peeks around, terrified that a Watcher will overhear us.

Slipping my arm from her hand, I leave her dumbfounded and shove my way through the bodies of people. Inside the tight space of the Corridor, bodies are smashed together in the area that surrounds the oval stage. The air is dank and smells of fear, just the way the Highers like it. I stand at the back, trying to stay inconspicuous. People are talking, not about the Gathering, but about the Bellator who attacked a Higher in the hall.

"She's probably dead by now," a stubby, rounded lady with a bob cut whispers to her husband, who nods in agreement.

I tap my foot, waiting for it to all be over.

"She deserves to die," someone else says.

I turn to see who it is, but a soft voice shivers against my ear. _"Not yet."_

I've heard this voice before. But glancing over my shoulder, all I see are vaguely familiar faces of Colony members none in particular stand out. But I sense someone watching me. I start to push my way through, but the Highers enter, rows and rows of white in a sea of black. I stand back, lowering my head, but watch them through hooded eyes. They're almost identical, only the tiniest variations make it so they're not the same person; slightly paler eyes, shorter hair, sharper cheekbones.

For a split second, I think I recognize Monarch walking amongst them only he's dressed in a robe and looks just like them. But I blink and the image is gone.

They file onto the stage, standing shortest to tallest. Gabrielle's in the middle, carrying a black box. He advances to the center of the stage and drops the black box on the floor.

"Welcome to the Gathering, everyone." His cold voice slithers the room. "It's a pleasure for you to all come."

_Like we have a choice._

Gabrielle keeps talking, but I'm already measuring my options. Two Watchers guard the exit, their hands suspended above their Tasers, itching to use them. And even more line the back of the room. There's a group of them standing in the doorway, whispering through their masks. Then, suddenly, all of their eyes land on me.

My time's up. Either it's now or never. I know I don't stand a chance. I'll be caught in seconds and probably executed on the spot. But I don't care. Through the throng of people, I catch Tristan's eye.

_Bye_ , I mouth.

His eyebrows knit together as I rip my gaze away. I glide my knife out of my pocket, not afraid, but not hollow. In fact, I'm more alive than I've ever been.

# Chapter 9

My eyes shoot open. It's dark and grogginess plasters my mind and my body. I'm covered in plastic. It's all over me, touching my skin, smothering me. Where am I? I run my finger along the plastic until I feel the teeth of a zipper. I realize right away what this is. A body bag. I'm trapped in a God damn body bag.

Tracing the track, I find the zipper handle and battle to unzip it. But I realize it's going nowhere and I give up and tear at the plastic, digging my fingernails into it until I break through to the outside. I don't know what to expect, but I'm prepared for the worst. It's something Monarch taught me. Always expect the worst, that way you'll be prepared for anything.

_Monarch_. Thinking of him makes me choke.

I decide not to think about him for a while, until I can get myself together. I collect myself and slash the rest of the way through the body bag. I'm surrounded by enormous, jagged, and fiery red rocks. The land is rolling hills of sand and the sky is dark with clouds and smoke, but less hazy than in the city, like the sun can almost break free.

"Where am I?" I mumble, searching for the city. The last thing I can remember is moving to kill Gabrielle.

"Help!" Someone screams.

I spin. Just a few feet in front of me, lying in the sand, is another body bag. And it's moving. I reach for my knife, surprised to find it's still in my pocket. I squat down next to the body bag and give it a gentle tap. "Who's in there?"

A pause. "Kayla?"

"Yeah?"

"Kayla! Kayla!" He yells. "It's Bernard!"

"I thought you were dead." I pause, scratching my forehead with the silver handle of my knife. "How do I know it's really you?"

"Kayla, just let me out of here!" he shouts and then kicks furiously, the body bag bulging up and down.

Keeping my knife in my hand, I unzip the bag. Bernard bursts through the opening, gasping for air, his brown hair sticking up in all kinds of directions.

"Oh my God. Oh my God." He runs his hand through his hair, which only makes it stick up worse. "What the hell happened?"

"I have no idea," I mumble, searching the desert for more body bags that might be hiding nearby. I swear I can sense someone around. I hike over the shallow hill, my boots filling with sand. The wind is blowing and the air is rough against my cheeks and hair. I spot it, at the foot of the hill, another black body bag. Stealthily, I drop down the hill.

"Where are you going?" Bernard shouts after me.

I shake my head at him and return my attention to the bag. It's not moving, but my knife remains out, just in case. "Is anyone in there?" I ask.

"Kayla?" a small voice squeaks. "Kayla, is that you?"

I nearly drop my knife. "Maci?"

"Kayla!" She panics, thrusting at the bag from inside. "Get me out of here! Please! I can't breathe."

I unzip the bag and Maci springs upright, coughing for air. I pat her back until she's breathing normal. "What's going on?" She asks with bulging eyes as she takes in our surroundings.

"I don't know." I crouch down so I'm eyelevel with her. "What's the last thing you remember?"

She considers this with a pensive expression. "An Angel."

Furrowing my eyebrows, I feel her forehead, checking for fever. But her skin's cold. "Maci, what's an Angel?"

She stumbles to her feet and dusts the sand off her black pants. "The person that saved me from the fire."

I worry she might be sick, even if she doesn't look like it. In fact, she looks better than she has since she collapsed during Lessons. Her color has returned, sweat no longer soaks her red hair, and her brown eyes seem lively.

Bernard rolls down the hill and hits the bottom with an _oomph_. "Maci?" He says, getting to his feet. "What are you doing here?"

I turn to him with my knife pointed out. "What's the last thing you remember?"

He shrugs and kicks his boot at the ground. "Nothing really." Little drops of perspiration bead his skin. He's lying.

"You sure about that?" I ask, inching my knife at him.

He glares and swats my knife away from him. "What, you think I'm lying?"

"Did you see the Angel too?" Maci's brown eyes light up excitedly. "The one dressed in white."

"You mean a Higher?" Bernard asks, rubbing his neck tensely.

"No, I mean the Angel." Maci smoothes her hair down and starts twirling in the sand, like she's dancing.

"What the hell's an Angel?" Bernard asks, brushing sand out of his hair.

"You know," Maci says, still spinning as she gazes up at the sky. "The man who helped Taggart save us from the fire."

Bernard burns her with a death stare. "I don't remember any freakin' Angel. But I do want to know where the heck we are." He motions around us. "I mean, look at this place. I've never seen anything like it."

"We've never seen much of anything besides the city," I say. "In fact, I don't think either of you have even been out of The Colony, have you?"

Maci shakes her head, but Bernard targets his death stare at me. "I've been out, so don't go thinking you're something special when you're not."

I resist the urge to knock him out and opt to ignore him. "I wonder how far the city is from here."

"Who the hell knows," Bernard snaps. "You can't see a thing with all the stupid rocks lying around."

"It's not the rock's fault." Maci says. "And we need to find the city, so we can go back."

"Back where?" I stare up at highest point of one of the taller rocks. If I can get up there, maybe I can get a better view of where we are and where the city could be.

"Back to The Colony." Maci takes my hand. "Back home."

I cringe. I might not know how we got out here, or what we're doing here, but I know we probably can't go back there.

"Does anyone remember _anything_ at all? Besides an Angel?" I ask. "Maci, do you remember what happened to you after you left the hospital?"

She nods zealously. "They took me to the room of fire."

_The Infirmary._ "Who took you there?"

"The man in the white coat." She pauses, sweeping her hair out of her eyes. "Your dad."

_Monarch._ "But Maci, I don't understand. Why would Mon... I mean, my dad take you there?"

"Because I was dead," she replies, tracing circles in the sand with her boots.

"I think Maci hit her head or something," Bernard says.

"I didn't hit my head," Maci protests, putting her hands on her hips. "I know what I saw."

"Yeah, an Angel." Bernard sneers. "Whatever the heck that is."

"Kayla, tell Bernard I'm right," Maci says. "Tell him the Angel saved us."

I blink at the girl who said she was dead and I recollect my last few visits to the hospital. I couldn't hear Maci's pulse. Worse, I suddenly become painfully aware of something.

Either my ability to detect heartbeats is defective. Or all three of us stand here walking, talking, and breathing without a heartbeat.

# Chapter 10

I once had to run for over three hours during a surprise attack while out on a raid. I was with two other Bellators and decided to use myself as a decoy, so they could get away. There were so many vampires and it took me forever to find a way back to The Colony. But that day I discovered something remarkable. I'm fast. And I mean fast, with seemingly never-ending endurance.

I decide the best thing to do is figure out a plan. It's getting late and if there are vampires prowling around, they'll be out as soon as dark possesses the sky. I tell Maci and Bernard to wait where they are, while I run up to the top of the highest rock and scope things out. I make it to the top in no time, but my breath catches at what I see. Miles and miles of red rock stacking the golden desert land. There's no sign of life, water, or food. No buildings. No people. To add to the bad situation, hundreds of caves carve the sides of the red rocks, which means there are hundreds of places for vampires to hide. The clouds are starting to shift, deepening in color. Darkness is rapidly approaching.

"You can handle this, Kayla," I mutter to myself. "You just need to come up with a plan."

"Kayla!" Bernard hollers. "Get down here. Maci won't shut up about this stupid Angel thing!"

Who do they think I am? Their mother? From up here, they look like tiny dots in a land of dust, arguing with each other, making way too much noise. I could just take off and leave them here to fend for themselves. It'd be easier to find a place to hide and much faster if I were alone. But I'm not that kind of person; I realize that right away. So I climb back down the rocks.

"Okay." I dust the dirt off my hands and knees. "Here are the rules that we're going to need to follow if we want to have a chance at surviving. Rule number one—"

"We already know the rules." Bernard rolls his eyes. "Always carry a weapon. Never go out after dark. Never get bit, yadda, yadda, yadda."

"Those rules don't apply to us anymore—well, except for the getting bit part. That always applies." I wave my hand at the sky. "Night's coming and we have no place to hide." I pause. "Now, we're going to have to make up our own rules if we want to survive out here. Okay everyone check your pockets and see if you have anything on you." They start patting the pockets of their pants, while I check my leather jacket.

"I got nothin." Bernard kicks a rock and it slingshots across the air and skids to the ground. "This is such crap. What'd they do? Search all my pockets before they threw me out? They even took my freakin' necklace."

His necklace. Inside my pocket, my fingers graze the cold metallic plate. Right beside it is Monarch's pocket watch. I can't believe they're both still there. I take them out.

Bernard steals his necklace away. "You took this from me?"

"No, I found it in the hospital, after I saw Gabrielle dragging you down the hall," I say. "Which, by the way, what happened with that?"

He gives me a dirty look, ignoring my last question. "Yeah, right. Sure you did." He nods at Monarch's pocket watch. "And who'd you steal that from?"

I close my hand around the pocket watch. "I don't remember you being this rude."

"And I don't remember you being a thief," he snaps.

"It's from her dad," Maci interrupts, walking between us, her hair a halo of red blowing in the wind. "He gave it to her before he died."

I wrap my hand around the pocket watch, the warm metal pressing against the palm of my hand, memories of Monarch swirling my head. "Maci, how do you know he gave it to me? Were you awake or something?"

She shakes her head and smiles sweetly. "I just know."

"Okay." I'm not sure what to do about all this. The kid is talking about Angels, death, and knowing everything, like someone would talk about what they ate for dinner.

Bernard hooks the necklace around his neck and gives a quick squint at the metal plate, before tucking it under his black t-shirt. But I catch a glimpse of the numbers on it. This time I know they're numbers because some match what's on the face of the pocket watch.

"So that says your name on it?" I question, nodding at the spot on his shirt where the necklace hides.

He crosses his arms over his chest. "Yes, Kayla," he says snidely. "I already told you this once."

Talking to him is pointless so I move on to the last thing in my pocket. My knife. I inch it out, the silver handle the perfect fit for my hand, the jagged blade sharp enough for plunging into a vampire's chest. If I ever get that far.

"Does anyone have anything else, weapons, anything at all?" I ask, tracing my finger tip along the blade.

"Nope," Bernard answers, not bothering to check.

I consider patting him down just to make sure. "What about you Maci...?" I trail off at what the small girl clutches in her hands. "Where did you get those?"

She hands me three syringes and three vials, each filled with a black liquid. "The Angel gave them to me."

Lines sketch the label, forming words I can't read. "Did they tell you what to do with them?"

"Yeah, he said we were supposed to inject them," she says, zipping up her jacket. "As soon as we got out here—that it would save us."

Inject an unknown medicine into my body? "Wait. Someone told you we were going to wake up here—out in the desert?" I ask. "Did they tell you why?"

She nods. "But I can't tell you yet—not until you're ready."

"Did they say—"

A shriek rips the air, like a siren of death. We all freeze.

The vampires have awakened.

# Chapter 11

"No... no no no." Bernard's on the verge of a meltdown, tugging at his hair as he rocks back and forth. "This can't be happening. This can't be happening."

"Calm down." I stuff the watch and vials into my pocket. "It's just like when we're out on a raid. We just gotta stay on our toes and stay out of their sight."

"No it's not, Kayla!" He screams. "This is totally different. We're not in the city and it's dark—no one goes on raids when it's dark."

_Except me._ "Keep your voice down," I hiss. "You're going to lead them right to us."

"Kayla." Maci tugs on my sleeve. "We're not safe here. We need to move."

"I know. I'm working on it."

Darkness hasn't quite touched the land yet so we have a little time. But not much.

Another shriek ripples the air.

"Kayla," Maci says, jerking my arms. "We need to go. _Now_. If we stay here, we die."

"Okay, okay, follow me." I hike up the sandy hill, heading for a steeple of rocks, moving fast, but not as fast as I could. Bernard stumbles after us, a panicked mess, but Maci seems calm. A little too calm.

By the time we reach the rocks, there's hardly anything left of the sky. Bernard and Maci are winded, panting loudly, bodies tired.

"Guys, try to keep quiet, okay?" I whisper because the only thing between us and them is a circle of large boulders that have cracks between them, giving the vampires plenty of places to squeeze through and take us by surprise.

Bernard hunches over, pressing his hands to his sides. "Now what do we do?"

"Now we hide here until morning." I pull out my knife. "You should find something sharp to protect yourself with, just in case."

Bernard drops his hands from his side and stands up straight. "That's the stupidest plan I've ever heard."

"Well, if you got a better one," I say, "then by all means, offer it up. Because that's the best I can do right now."

He doesn't say anything and I sit down on a rock, watching the sky dwindle away, knowing our chances of not being found are low.

"You're really creepy." Bernard slumps down on the ground by my feet "You know that?"

I drag the blade of the knife along a rock. "In what way?"

"You're just too calm." Bernard motions at me. "You're not even scared. It's weird."

Suddenly, I'm aware that maybe my little secret is blatantly obvious. "I'm scared," I lie. "I just choose not to show it."

"That's bull." Bernard smirks at me. "You're not scared at all, even though we're going to die."

"We're not going to die." Maci sits down in the dirt next to Bernard and crosses her legs. She's found a fairly sharp rock, just like I told her to. But deep down I know it'll be no use. "Kayla's going to save us."

Bernard snorts. "Yeah, sure she is."

"She is," Maci says cheerfully. "Just wait and see."

I'm starting to worry about her health. "Why don't you lie down and get some rest. Bernard and I will keep watch for the night."

She grins and obeys. The air grows still as we huddle together, the last sliver of light slipping away and we're blinded by night. The rocks are our protectors, blocking them from us and us from them.

But not even the rocks can block out their cries.

* * *

We're sitting ducks. Little insects and creatures of the night scamper around us, but we stay still, crouching together.

Maci is sound asleep, her breath slow and rhythmic, but her heartbeat's still soundless. Then it starts to rain, black raindrops laced with the ash and smoke. I haven't seen rain in forever, but I'm grateful for it. It'll make a muddy mess, but it'll also wash away our scent and make us harder to track.

Maci lets out a blood-curdling scream. "Kayla!" Maci protects her head with her arms, her breaths fitful as she jumps to her feet. "What's happening?"

"It's just water," I assure her, tugging her back into the mud. "Everything's fine. But you need to calm down or they're going to hear you."

She glances up, raindrops drizzling down her face. Bernard curses under his breath. I shield my eyes from the rain and glance from left to right, checking that everything's safe, when I hear a soft thud.

Everyone tenses. Breaths falter. All except mine.

I'm as calm as I always am, ready for anything. My knife snaps out, preparing for battle. Another thump. Another crash.

"Kayla," Maci whispers. "They're coming."

I get to my feet, my boots clunking against the mud as I creep over to a splinter of space between two rocks. At first I'm only blinded by splatters of rain, until I blink. Then I see them. They're everywhere, dragging their feet through the mud and puddles. I tell myself we're okay, just as long as _they_ remain on the other side of the rock. But an eye appears on the other side and all hopes of being okay wash away with the sand. The eye trickles blood as it burns a lifeless gaze at me. I duck, telling myself it didn't see me. But the shriek that stabs through the air tells me it did.

I have to do something. And fast.

I grab Maci and tuck her in a cubby in the bottom rock. "Stay here. And, whatever happens, don't make a sound."

She nods and I turn to Bernard. "I need your help."

His eyes are wide as he hugs himself and stares blankly at the rain.

"Bernard." I snap my fingers in front of his face, but no reaction. I shake him by the shoulders, but it's like he's slipped into a comatose state. I guess I'm on my own. I move to a narrow gap in the rocks and quietly slip head first inside. I take a deep breath. "You've done this before," I whisper to myself. "You can do it again."

With my knife in my hand, I don't look back as I glide myself into their world. I land in the mud head first, but I'm on my feet without missing a beat. I've actually startled them and for a moment, they look lost, like they're not quite sure what to do with someone who offers themselves up so easily.

But the blood in their eyes washes the look away and they all swarm for me, the gaping holes in their skin getting filled with mud and rain.

I run, letting my legs be the weapon and they rise to the challenge, chasing after me. Vampires are fast. The very first time I went out on a raid, I was warned about this, but I didn't realize how fast until the first time I was chased. But I also realized just how inhumanly fast I was.

My legs carry me through the mud and puddles, the rain refusing to let up. Every now and then I glance behind my shoulder, making sure they're still following me. Like the hungry beasts they are, they seek blood. And I've got a body full of it.

Their fangs snap out as we move deeper into the sand hills. I launch myself over a rock, but fall back when I spot a mob of vampires down at the bottom.

"Dammit." I swing to my right, only to spot more—they seem to be multiplying. I try my left, but it's blocked. And they're all moving for me, fangs trembling to eat me alive. One nips at my ankles and I jump, barely missing getting bit. I think of how the two left me, but I guess my luck has finally worn off.

They pile toward me and I turn in a circle, searching for an escape, but their bodies scatter the land even farther than I can see.

I have no choice. There's nowhere to go and I refuse to become infected and turn into one of them. I raise my knife for my chest and shut my eyes. "Goodbye," I whisper in the wind.

But my voice is overlapped by a, "No!"

And then the sound echoes with a hundred more. The sound of a stampede encloses me and I dare a peek. They're all running away, into the night. I stand motionless, watching them disappear into the blackness, realizing I might be the one and only person the vampires don't want to touch.

But why?

After they all clear, I step down from the rock. Rain still pours from the sky and violently nicks at my eyes and cheeks. I shield my hand in front of my face as I climb up the hill and slide down into the trench. Mud soaks my jeans and leaks into my boots. Every part of my body feels strange. And maybe that's why I don't hear it until it's too late.

The rush of water as it rips through the trench, knocking my feet out from under me. I smack my head on a rock and my ears ring as I fight to stay afloat. The water's cold and mixed with sand and dirt, making it heavy and suffocating as I try to paddle my way to the side. My feet finally find ground and I push myself through the water, slipping and loosing balance again. Water bursts against my legs as the water steals my body. But someone catches my arm.

"Give me your hand," Bernard says and I latch onto him. He heaves me out and I crumple to the ground.

"Where did you come from?" I cough up water. "And where's Maci?"

Bernard sinks in the sand, running his hands through his soaked hair. "Maci's still in her hiding spot. She said something about you drowning if I didn't come rescue you." He pauses. "You know she's getting pretty creepy too."

I roll over, pushing myself to my feet. "Well, I'm glad she is, because I'm pretty sure I'd be dead by now."

We start up the hill, sliding in the mud.

"What were you thinking, running out like that?" Bernard finally asks, not being rude like he was earlier, just curious.

"I was thinking it was better me than you two," I say simply. "Besides, I'm the experienced one."

"Yeah, but it didn't do any good. The vampires decided to leave on their own." He gestures around at the empty land. "If you would've just waited a little longer."

I nod, not bothering to tell him what really happened. And I'm not sure I'll ever tell anyone. Who knows what people would do if they found out I was the one and only person who can walk with the vampires and remain untouched.

Because people fear those who are different. And fear can make people do stupid things.

# Chapter 12

We make it through the rest of the night without any more vampire incidents, like every one of them has vanished into thin air, never to return. But I'm sure the silence is misleading. I know without a doubt that I'll see a vampire again.

When the sky starts to grey with morning, I can finally breathe. My clothes are caked in a thick layer of dirt that I work to chip off with my knife.

"You need a shower," Bernard remarks, scrapping some dirt off his sleeve.

I pull a chunk of mud out of my hair. "Yeah, I'll get right on it."

Maci's fast asleep, curled up in the cubby of the rock. I owe the kid my life and vow to keep her as safe as I can from now on.

After I've gotten most of the dirt off my clothes and face, I get to my feet and stretch my hands above my head, blinking the morning from my eyes.

"You're alive." Maci crawls out, her hands and hair covered with a red layer of dust from the rock. "I'm so glad you made it."

"Well, I wouldn't have," I say, "if you hadn't sent Bernard to help me." I wipe the blade of my knife and tuck it away. "How did you know I was going to drown?"

She smiles. "Because I can see things in my head sometimes—before they're gonna happen."

"I'd say she was crazy," Bernard says stepping beside me. "But after what happened last night..."

"How long have you been able to see things?" I ask curiously.

"Since I came out from behind the red door," she replies.

I smile, but a shudder crawls through my body as I remember the red door and how it sent a surge of fear through me, one so strong it kept me from opening it.

"We should get going." I pick up my jacket I had left draped over the rock so it could dry out. The fabric is crusty and stiff and I ball it up, deciding to carry it, and then start over the rocks.

"Go where?" Bernard follows after me, gracefully climbing over the rock. His clumsiness has seemed to shift over night, but I'm glad. "I mean, where the heck are we supposed to go? There's nothing around."

"I know that." I give Maci a hand getting down. "But we need to go somewhere—find some food and water so we don't starve to death."

"There are puddles everywhere." Bernard points to the ground. "We could drink from them."

"But they're gross." Maci makes a face. "And there's bugs in them."

"It might be our only choice." I kneel down beside a puddle, picking out a fly floating in it. Then I scoop a handful and holding my breath, take a sip.

"Ew," Maci whispers.

"How's it taste?" Bernard asks derisively.

"Not that bad," I lie and take another sip, trying not to gag. Survival is survival and humans need water to survive. "You should all drink up before it evaporates."

"No thanks," Bernard says. "I'm good."

Maci looks disgusted, but leans down and cups a handful of dirty water. Then she takes a sip, a sour expression twisting on her face, but she doesn't complain.

I drink a few more handfuls, but Bernard refuses. "You're going to get dehydrated," I warn.

He shrugs, brushing his hair out of his eyes. "Then I guess I'll get dehydrated."

His moodiness is starting to wear on my nerves. I take him by the arm and pull him aside. "Look, I understand how hard this is, but being a jerk isn't going to help. So can you just drink some water so I don't have to worry about you dying from dehydration?"

He smirks. "Nah, I'd rather not." He gives me a mocking pat on the back. "Oh yeah, and you're welcome for me saving you last night." He lowers his voice. "I could have easily just let the water take you away, and then I would have been the one calling all the shots."

What concerns me more than his words is that he's not afraid anymore. The once erratic and terrified boy has suddenly vanished.

We head across the desert, whereabouts and destination unknown. Bellies grumble, lips crack, bodies ache. Even through the smoke and clouds, the sun's heat manages to gleam down.

"I'm tired," Maci says after a while. "I need a break."

Bernard's got the hood of his jacket tugged over his head, his hands up in his sleeves.

"Aren't you hot?" I ask. "And thirsty."

He shakes his head. "Nope."

But I am and so is Maci. The puddles are becoming scarcer and I decide it's time to take a break. We move into the shadows of the rocks, concealing ourselves in the shade, and drink from the puddles. All except Bernard.

I wipe the water from my chin. "Do you have a death wish?"

He only smiles through his hood. "Death doesn't seem so bad, really." He turns his back on me, hikes off to a cluster of rocks, and sits down.

"Don't worry, Kayla," Maci whispers, wiping the water dripping from her lips. "He won't die without water 'cause he's already dead."

My hands slip apart and water spills to the ground. "Bernard's going to die... did you see that?"

She shakes her head. "No, he's already dead. He stole one of those vials of medicine last night and injected it into himself, so now he's dead forever."

I quickly check my pockets and only find two black vials and two syringes. "Maci, you have to try and remember what's in these. Did the Angel say anything about what would happen when we injected it into us?"

She nods. "He said it'd save us."

"Save us from what?" I pause as I hear it.

A heartbeat.

My ability has returned. At first I think the heartbeat's either mine or Maci's, but when I realize it's not, I turn to Bernard. But he's gone.

"Did you see where he went?" I ask and she shakes her head. I scoot her up against the rock. "Don't move until I get back, okay?"

Drawing my knife out of my jacket, I walk vigilantly toward the collection of rocks where I last saw Bernard. The heartbeat knocks louder. I hold my breath as I climb onto the rocks and peek down the other side. But it's empty. And the heartbeat's vanished.

"I don't get it," I mumble and turn to Maci. "Are you sure you didn't see where he went?"

She shakes her head, but then her eyes snap wide. "Kayla, look out!"

The heart strikes deafeningly against my eardrums as a pair of hands wrap themselves around my waist and jerk me back. I slam my head back, knocking it against the persons face and we both tumble off the rocks, hitting the bottom hard. I'm on my feet in a matter of seconds, but I've lost my knife. Where is my knife?

"Looking for this?"

My eyes rise to the unfamiliar voice. His eyes are the color of honey. His dark hair sweeps across his forehead and runs scraggly down his ears and neck. He's tall and lean and has this funny white line running below his eye and down his left cheek. I'm not sure what it is, but it has me curious. So does the feeling that I know him.

He's holding my knife and I don't like it. "You dropped this," he says and tosses it to me.

I catch it effortlessly, without taking my eyes off him.

"You seem confused," he says with a sparkle in his honey eyes.

I wrap my fingers around the handle of my knife. "Who are you?"

"Well that's a weird coincidence," he says with a smile. "Because I was thinking the same thing."

I eye him over. "You're unarmed."

He spreads his arms out to the side of him. "Which gives you all the power."

"You knocked me to the ground," I say.

"You slammed me in the head." He touches his forehead. "You've got a tough head, you know that?"

I step to the side, keeping my eyes on him and my knife out. "You're the one who grabbed me first."

"Only to protect you." His pulse is consistent, never faltering, never wavering, which would indicate he's telling the truth. But my thoughts whisper otherwise.

"Where did you come from?"

"Did you find them yet?" A girl jumps down into the rocks, sees me, and sighs. "Thank God. I thought we were going to be tracking them down forever." Her blue eyes measure me. They're traced with this black stuff and colorful pictures trace up and down her arms. Her dark hair is matted in thick wisps. She's tall and looks tough on the outside, but on the inside she's scared of me.

I make a mental note of this.

"Who are you?" I point my knife at the girl.

She gapes at the guy. "Were we this ridiculously jumpy when we first got out?"

He shrugs, never taking his eyes of me. "I'm sure we were."

She fiddles with a ring in her nose. "Where's the other two?"

He points over his shoulder. "The little one's over there by the cliffs, but I don't know where the other one went."

The girl starts over the rocks and I move to step in front of her, but the guy intervenes.

"Easy, okay," he says, his hand on my shoulder holding me back. "We're not going to hurt you. We're here to help."

I poke the tip of my knife against his chest. "How do I know you're not lying?"

He smiles cleverly. "I'm sure you have your ways."

My wrist stiffens and I feel exposed, like I've been stripped down and everyone can see my secrets. I try to think of something clever to say that will throw him off, but the girl ascends back over the rocks, with Maci skipping happily beside her.

"Kayla, we're saved!" she exclaims, hopping down the rocks.

"She's a cheerful little one," the girl says with an eye roll.

"Good," the guy answers. "Maybe some of it will rub off on you."

She pulls a face and he grins. "Cheer up," he says. "We found them and now we can go home."

"I'm sorry," I interrupt. "But who the hell are you?"

"I thought you said she knew things?" the girl says to Maci.

"No, I do," Maci says. "But it doesn't always work."

I shoot Maci a warning look, while the girl and the guy exchange a look. Then he directs his honey eyes on me.

"This is Ryder." He nods at the girl. "And I'm Aiden."

"Aiden." I don't even know why I say his name aloud, but he seems thrilled that I did. I frown. "Why are you out here?"

"For the same reason you are." Ryder crosses her arms and stares me down. "But where's your third?"

"Third?" I ask.

"Yeah, we're dumped in groups of three." She waves her finger back and forth between Maci and I. "But there are only two of you here, so where'd the third go?"

_Bernard_. "I couldn't tell you."

Her expression twists. "You don't know or there isn't another one?"

I shrug, not wanting to divulge more information. These two already know too much about me and I know nothing about them. Plus, their hearts are as steady as they come, so I can't sense if they're lying or not and that makes me uneasy.

I take Maci's hand and back away. "Listen, I don't know who you are, but we need to get going."

"No way. You're not going anywhere." Ryder seizes Maci's arm.

With one fast movement, I've pried her hand off and shoved her to the ground.

"Why you little—" Ryder jumps to her feet and charges at me. I drop Maci's arm and swing to the side.

"Ryder, knock it off, "Aiden warns, but Ryder ignores him, coming at me again.

I ram the tip of my boot into her shin and she buckles back, falling on her butt.

"Easy." Aiden helps her to her feet, but she shucks him off. "You know they're a lot stronger than you right now. And unstable."

"Only if they've gone through with it," she shouts in his face. "And I'm really curious to find out, after all that talk about how great she is."

I don't get scared, but this is pushing me to the limits. They know me somehow, but I don't know them. Spinning, I grab Maci's hand and lift her with me as I spring onto the rocks. Fingers dig into my ankle and I'm jerked back down to the ground, but land on my feet.

"Easy, Kayla," Aiden breathes in my ear. "It's always hard the first time, but it gets better."

I'm about to kick him where the sun doesn't shine, when we're both hurled to the ground. My neck burns as something sharp stabs into it. I roll on my back, seeing stars amongst the clouds. But that can't be right. Because the stars no longer come out.

# Chapter 13

_Circles of smoke fill my head, begging me to listen._

_"Listen to me," someone whispers. I know the voice. It's Monarch. "Listen before it's too late."_

_"I can't see you," I say through the fog, reaching, trying to find my way to something I know isn't reachable._

_"It's okay." His voice is like a blanket, warming me, comforting me. "But you need to know—need to understand this one thing. Are you listening to me, Kayla?"_

_"I'm always listening to you, Monarch."_

_"Good, now hold on until I tell you to let go. And whatever you do, don't let them find out what you know."_

* * *

My eyelids are heavy and I'm lying in a puddle of my own drool. My hair is plastered to the side of my face, my skin damp with sweat. The thoughts that fill my head are disturbing. But I don't know what they mean, yet at the same time, it feels like I should.

"Rise and shine, sleepy head," Someone says, gently patting me on the head.

Honey colored eyes greet me as I lift my eyelids open. It's Aiden, the guy from the desert. My heart flutters as he smiles down at me, his dark hair shadowing his eyes. He's dressed in a grey jacket and dark blue pants, colors that are similar to the black uniforms The Colony members wear. Seeing someone not dressed head-to-toe in black feels unnatural.

I start to stand, but realize I'm chained up. In the snap of a finger, I'm on my feet, tugging at the chains that bind my wrists. But they're secured into the floor, forbidding me from going far.

The room is lit by a trail of lanterns. The dirt walls and lack of windows make me suspect that we're inside a hill. And the rotting floorboards that creak beneath my feet sound like they're going to give out at any moment.

"Easy," Aiden says. "There's no use trying to run. Those chains are secure. Even secure enough to restrain a Bellator."

I move for him until the chains are tugged tight. "Who are you? And what is this place? Is it... your Colony?"

"No." He shakes his head and I detect a falter in his heart. "This is a place of freedom."

His words feel forbidden, but I'm not in The Colony anymore. I wrinkle my forehead as I stare at the chains. "If it's a place of freedom, then what are these?"

"Don't worry. It's temporary," he says. "We just have to make sure you're not dangerous."

"Dangerous?" I question. "I'm not the one who stabbed the other one with a needle."

He blinks at me. "What? No one stabbed you with a... oh." He runs his hands through his hair. "That wasn't a needle."

"Then what was it? A knife? A tranquilizer? What?"

He presses his lips together, holding back a secret. "Look, I can't let you go until we know for sure you're not going to hurt anyone."

"You're the ones hurting me." I lift my wrists, jiggling the chains. "I'm the one who's being hurt here."

He cocks an eyebrow. "So you didn't try to hurt Ryder?"

"She came after me first," I protest. "I was trying to defend myself."

"And you've never tried to hurt anyone before that?"

My mind flickers back to The Colony, the last thing I can remember. My knife is out, ready to take the life of Gabrielle with my bare hands. "No. Never." I bat my eyelashes innocently.

"You might want to try lying better than that, Kayla," he says.

My head jerks back. No one's ever called me out like that. "How do you know my name?"

"I know a lot about you." He takes a strand of my hair and twirls it around his finger. "Am fost dor de tine ienupăr, mai mult decât veţi şti vreodată. Vă rugăm să reţineţi."

My lips part. "You speak the Higher's language?"

"Everyone should understand the language of their enemy." He releases my hair and backs toward the door with a vague smile.

"What does that mean? What you said?" I ask. "And when are you going to let me go?"

"Soon." He slides his hands inside the pockets of his jeans and turns his back on me.

"But what about the other question?" I yell, but he's already gone. "What did you say to me!"

# Chapter 14

After its clear Aiden's not coming back any time soon, I lie down on the floor, prop my feet up on the wall, and stare at the chains. I can't help but think how similar this place is to The Colony. The chains are there only they're clearly visible now. So what lies next for me? What happens after the chains are undone? Are these people going to just let me go? Turn me loose when they obviously think they have a reason for chaining me up in the first place? The chances seem slim.

Lying on my back, I start raveling the chains around my wrist, moving them around and around, until they're so tight, the metal clips my skin. Then, pushing my feet against the wall, I yank at the chains, hoping the clips will give out.

But after an eternity of trying, the door opens up and Aiden enters cautiously, as if he fears me. But he doesn't. He actually fears he'll lose me, which makes no sense at all.

Keys dangle from his fingers and he's holding an aluminum cup. As he takes in the sight of me, his eyebrow arcs. "Were you trying to escape?"

I frown at the upside down him. "Would you blame me if I was?"

He laughs and sets the cup down. His boots scuff against the dirt as he stops just short of me, eyes searching mine.

"What are you looking for?" I ask, rolling onto my stomach.

"Nothing." He sighs and then his hand is moving for me. Instinctively, I jump to my feet and fall back, ready to fight. "Easy, Kayla," he says. "I'm not going to hurt you. I promise."

Either he's the best liar in the world, or he's telling the truth because everything about him is honest. This time when he moves for me, I hold as still as a statue, listening to his breath and the sound of his heart, the tune momentarily soothing me.

He clicks the key in the lock and turns it, releasing me from the cuffs. Then he steps back, brushing his hair out of his eyes. I shake my wrists and breathe in the taste of freedom.

"So you're Aiden," I say and then absentmindedly add. "Little fire."

"That's one meaning for it." He puts the key in his pocket. "But how did you know that?"

I rub my wrists, little red welts bumping my porcelain skin. "I don't know." I scratch at the welts, but Aiden pulls my hand away.

"Scratching at it is only going to make it worse." He picks up the metal cup, liquid swishing around inside. "Come one. I'll show you around."

He walks out the door. But before I step out, I skeptically peer out, wanting to see what I'm getting into.

"No one's going to hurt you here," he says, waving for me to follow. "I promise."

I step out, still cautious. "What is this place?" Lanterns track the ceiling, lighting up the darkness of the dirt tunnel. We start down it, passing door after door, and I keep my senses on high alert.

My throat feels dry and I realize how thirsty I am. "What's in the cup?"

He covers the top with his hand. "Nothing important. And nothing you'd want to drink. I don't think anyway."

"So where's Maci?" I ask, my eyes following the lanterns.

"Maci's with Ryder," he answers, making me cringe. "And the other one's being detained."

I stop. "You found Bernard? And you locked him up?"

"We had to lock him up," he says. "He's unstable right now."

I think of the medicine Bernard injected, wondering what it was, but not saying anything about it. This place seems nervous and I don't want to bring anymore suspicion toward us.

"And you left Maci with that horrible girl with the funny hair and weird markings on her arms?" I ask.

"Ryder's not that bad." He reaches for my hand, but I pull back. "Kayla, we had to lock him up," he says. "He tried to kill you."

I touch my neck, remembering the sharp stab. "How exactly did he try to kill me?"

He nods his head at the end of the tunnel. "Come with me and I'll explain."

I reluctantly follow, but my fingers itch for my knife. "Where'd you put all my stuff?"

He shoots me a perplexed look as he removes a lantern from the ceiling. "Your stuff?"

"You know, my jacket, my knife, and everything else."

"Oh that." He looks like he's hiding something, but he's heart suggest otherwise. "We put it away... you can have it back, though. When we're done."

"Done with what?"

He winks at me. "You'll see." The dim glow of the lantern lights up against his eyes as he leads me further down the tunnel. "So that Maci kid is a little weird," he says.

"She's just young," I lie because really I agree with him. Maci has been acting strange, with her sensing things and sporadic states of euphoria. It's kind of creepy. And very similar to me.

"And that boy named Bernard," he pauses, deliberating. "Well, he's kind of an ass."

I don't say anything, kicking at the dirt. This place is strangely silent. "Is anyone else around? You say this is your home, but does anyone else actually live here?"

The tunnel answers for me. Down below, it opens up into a room, crammed with a group of people, at least fifteen or so. Crates are tipped over for chairs and the tables look like large wooden spools. There's nothing sterile about this place and I like that there's not.

"Don't go anywhere for a minute," Aiden instructs. "I'll be right back." Then he disappears down the tunnel.

I watch the people from over the railing, noticing how young most of them are. And they look so happy, smiles on their faces, bright eyes, and I don't know what to do with it all. I'm so used to everyone being terrified, but these people, well, at the moment no one seems afraid of anything. They just sit, eating their food, talking, laughing, and it seems so real.

I spot Ryder through the crowd, chatting to a group of guys with similar markings on their skin. She laughs, throwing her head back. Is it really that easy, to be that happy?

When Aiden returns, his dark hair is ruffled, there are red lines running up and down his arms and trails of blood.

"So you have two choices," he says, putting his hands on the railing. "Either you can go down and meet everyone or clean up first and then go down."

I glance down at my mud-caked clothes. "I'll clean up first, I guess."

"I thought you'd say that," he says. Then he takes me to a small room with a metal bed pushed against the dirt wall and a few wooden trunks stacked in the corners. Clothes hang from hooks in the ceiling and there are some strange looking objects cluttering the floor.

"So this is my room." He points to a curtain. "The shower is behind there." He eyes my clothes. "And I'll go see if anyone has anything you can borrow until we can get your clothes cleaned."

I nod and he leaves, shutting the door behind him. I hear the click of a door locking.

I shake my head. "Unbelievable." I start to remove my muddy clothes, making a lap around his room. There are some clothes, a knife—not mine—and a pair of boots. There's also a book. I've never seen a book before—heard of them, but never actually seen one. I pick it up, noticing how old the tattered cover looks. I flip through the pages, but it's nothing more than ink to me.

I set the book back down and head for the shower, letting the water flow a little before I step in. I quickly scrub away the dirty water, ice-cold against my muscles. But then I realize I should have waited until Aiden brought clothes before I got in. I crack the curtain and am surprised to find a set of folded clothes on the bed, along with a towel. I shut off the water and get dressed. The blue shirt fits me perfectly, but the pants are a little too long, so I tuck them in my boots, before lacing them up. It's strange wearing clothes that aren't black and I feel a little out of place.

There's a knock at the door and I quickly pull my hair back into a ponytail. "Yeah, you can come in."

Aiden enters, the blood washed from his arms, but the lines still remain. "You look better."

"Thanks," I mumble, adjusting the shirt. "You didn't have to lock me in."

"Yeah I did." He smiles and for some reason I return it.

His breath catches, and his heart misses a beat. I quickly erase the impulsive smile from my face and he shakes his head and picks up a knife from off the floor.

"So I'm guessing you're hungry?" He puts the knife into his pocket and zips up his jacket.

"Yeah, I guess." My eye catches the book. "Can you... do you know how to read?"

He looks perplexed and follows my gaze. "Oh that. No I can't." He nudges the book aside. "Someone found that one day, while out in the city."

"You've been out to the city?" I ask.

"Everyone has at one time or another." He opens the door. "Let's go get you something to eat."

* * *

Downstairs, everyone receives me with inquiring eyes, making me feel like I forgot to put pants on or something. Maci's sitting next to Ryder on a turned over crate near the farthest corner. She's stuffing her mouth full of a bright yellow food I don't recognize, but it smells delicious.

"What is that?" I ask as Aiden pops one into his mouth.

"Food," he crunches. He wipes his face with his sleeve and hands me one.

Hesitantly, I take it and nibble a small bite. My mouth is immediately overflowed with the sweetest taste that's ever touched my tongue.

"What is this?" I ask, juice dripping down my chin.

"The best thing in the world," he says.

Ryder shoots him a disgusted look and her heart knocks quickly against her chest, not out of fear, but out of anger. "It's good to see you two are getting along so well after only spending a few minutes with each other." She stands, much taller than I remember, her head nearly touching the ceiling. "So what'd you do? Hit her over the head to get her to cooperate or something?"

Aiden touches a strand of my hair distractedly, as if he doesn't even realize he's doing it. "She's actually really cooperative; at least she was once I let her go." He winks at me, but then blinks and drops my hair.

"Well, isn't that wonderful," Ryder says sarcastically. "Now we can all just sit around and be one big happy family."

If this girl doesn't watch it, she's going to end up getting her ass kicked.

"The other one on the other hand is turning out to be a pain in the butt." He drops down on a crate and pops another piece of food into his mouth.

"You mean Bernard?" I sit down and Maci wraps her arms around me.

"I'm so glad you didn't die, Kayla," she says softly.

I give her a gentle pat. "Me too, Maci. Me too."

Sometimes it's hard for me to be close to people. If they're particularly fearful when they touch me, the rush of fear can be so intense that it's enough to almost send me to the ground. But what I sense off of Maci, is enough to make my ears ring. Monarch. Maci's afraid of Monarch.

Ryder leans back against the wall and puts her hands behind her head, kicking her filthy boot on the table. "So have you decided what you want to do with them?

"No one's doing anything with me," I say, before Aiden can respond.

"Yeah, 'cause Kayla can do whatever she wants," Maci says. "She can even take on a Higher."

Aiden, who was taking a sip from a bottle of water, spits it out across the table, all over Ryder. "You did what?" He coughs.

"I didn't take one on," I lie. "That would be insane."

"Yeah, you did," Maci protests. "Back in the hall—you grabbed one and then you were sent to the red room."

I assume she means the red door, but how could she possibly know this. She wasn't around.

She smiles cheerfully, swinging her feet back and forth as she takes a sip of water.

"You took on a Higher?" Aiden asks, astounded. "Like an actual Higher?"

"As opposed to a fake Higher," I say, avoiding his gaze. "And how do you know what they are? Did you live in The Colony at one time?" I pause. "Wait a minute, you guys don't... you don't have them around here, do you?" I gaze around the room, scanning for white figures, and all eyes are on me, like I've just broken a rule or something. What's worse, they all fear me. I catch a few of their frightened fingers itching for their knives, ready to stab them in me.

Ready to kill me.

I don't hesitate. I run.

# Chapter 15

I'm at the top of the staircase, before they even realize I've moved. There's rustling as they all scurry after me. I catch the soft flutter of Aiden's voice, but I don't turn back. My feet lift me down the dirt tunnel, the lanterns quivering as I brush by.

But halfway down, I suddenly stop. Maci. How can I just leave her behind? Especially after she saved me. I slow to a stop and wait. Because I know he's following me by the sound of his pulse flowing up the tunnel.

Finally he rounds a corner. "You're ridiculously fast," he pants when he reaches me. "You know that?"

"Why do they want to kill me?" I ask. "Why are they all scared? And where's Maci? No one better hurt her."

"Maci's fine. She's right where you left her." He grabs his side, winded. "And they're afraid of _you_ because you spoke of the Highers."

"So you do have them around here." I immediately turn on my defenses, looking for a weapon.

"No, we don't have them around here," he says. "But we know what they are. We all used to live in The Colony at one time or another."

I stare at him, trying to remember. "How can I not remember you? Or any of you?"

"I don't know." He shrugs. "Too big of a place, I guess. I mean, did you know every single person that lived there?"

"No, but what's the big deal?" I ask. "Why did they panic when I mentioned the Highers if there are none around?"

"Because," he puffs out a frazzled breath and then sketches the white line beneath his eye with his finger. "You're not going to make this easy, are you?"

A scream echoes from the distance. I glance up the hall, wondering where it came from.

"Kayla." His voice brings me back to reality. "You want some answers?"

A simple question, but it stuns me. "Yes."

He offers me his hand. "Then come with me and I'll give them to you."

I eye his hand with uncertainty, not sure if I can trust him, unsure of what fear I'll feel when I touch his skin.

"You can trust me," he says, urging his hand at me.

Reluctantly, I place my hand into his. What overwhelms me is a shock. Because I can't sense his fear. __ No. When I touch Aiden, all I feel is serenity, peacefulness and calm, like this is where I belong.

But still, it makes me uneasy. Because it's something I've never felt before.

* * *

We zigzag down the tunnel, passing by a few people who glower at me, still frightened about my mention of the Highers. But they don't dare make a move because I'm with Aiden. He takes me to a ladder and we climb up and step out onto the side of a rocky hill. The giant fiery rocks still surround the scenery and so do the caves that etch them.

"Are we safe out here?" I ask, glancing at the shadowy sky. "Isn't it a little too close to night?"

"As safe as anywhere else." He sits down on the side of the hill, in the midst of the rocks and sand and pulls me down with him. Then he lets go of my hand. "What do you remember about The Colony?"

I shrug. "That it was a..." I trail off, uncomfortable.

"This is a safe place, Kayla. There's no Highers lurking around, listening to our every word." He picks up a rock and throws it onto the ground below our feet. "Were you happy when you lived there? Were you sad when you woke up from the Gathering and realized you weren't there anymore?"

I press my lips together, knowing my answers, but not wanting to share them.

"You can tell the truth," he says, like he knows I'm a liar—knows me. "You can tell the truth now. There's no one stopping you."

I want to—I desperately want to. But I can't. "I don't really know what I felt."

He sighs, disappointed. "Well, I'll tell you what I felt. At first I was in a panic, wondering how I was ever going to survive in the outside world—feared I'd die within a few hours. But after a while, and after a lot of questions were answered, I moved on." He looks at me, his eyes burning with the passion in his words. "Because I finally realized something. Being controlled by the Highers isn't life and in a way, I was already dead when I lived there—at least my mind was."

Silence grasps the air as I take in his words, agreeing with him completely, but still my lips refuse to utter it aloud. He chucks another rock, this time harder, and it smacks against the ground, shooting fragments of red across the land.

"They take everything away from you that matters," he says. "The Highers do."

"I know." My voice startles me.

"Who'd they take away from you?" He stares at me expectantly.

"They didn't take anyone away from me," I lie, not wanting to speak Monarch's name. "I never had anyone to begin with."

"No one at all." He sighs, rubbing his forehead. "If that's true, Kayla, then it's really sad. There had to be someone."

I think of Tristan, whose heart I broke. And of Monarch, who the Highers took away from me. I shake my head. "No, when I left, I had no one at all."

He swallows hard. "What if I told you that you could live a better life? That you could be free and happy?

I gape at him. "How can a life like that exist?"

He stands, dusting the sand off the back of his pants. "Do you really want to know? Because some people don't—they'd rather go on not knowing what really happened because they fear the unknown." He extends his hand to me. "It's your choice, though. Everything's your choice now. It just matters whether or not you're brave enough to want the answers. The real answers, not the fake ones."

I've always considered myself brave, running out into a world where I could easily be slaughtered or turned by vampires. But this isn't the brave he's speaking of. This is being brave of the unknown. Like always, though, I'm not afraid.

I wanted the truth—always have. Whatever it ends up being.

I take his hand and again, I'm overcome by calmness. "Okay, give me the answers."

# Chapter 16

We leave the hillside and hike across the desert, dark sky imminent above. When I mention this to Aiden, he promises me we'll be all right, that where we're going isn't too far. But what about the walk back? This he has no answer for and I suddenly wonder if maybe I'm not the only one who vampires fear.

He walks at my pace, quick and in a hurry to get to where we're going. And I like that he does. I like a lot of things about him. Like the way his hair hangs in his eyes or how he touches me. I wonder if this was what Nina meant, when she spoke of how Tristan should have made me feel.

"Where exactly is the city?" I glance around at the horizon.

He makes a sharp curve to the left, dipping down around the foot a shallow hill that's lined with boulders. There's a massive trench full of muddy water and he splashes down into it, the water rising to his knees. I pull my hand away, hesitating, thinking of when I almost drowned.

"The city's a little over fifty miles away. This place," he motions at everything around us, "is The Gathering dumping ground. This is where all The Gathering members end up." He holds out his hand. "It's okay. It's just water."

I nod, taking his hand, and step down, the water climbing to the top of my legs. It has a funny smell to it, like metal and rust.

"But what's The Gathering for?" I wade further in, not letting go of his hand "I mean, what's the point? And why put us in body bags?"

We reach a large rounded pipe that snakes deep into the ground. Water streams down it like a river. "The first thing you need to know," he ducks inside the pipe, letting go of my hand, "is that we don't have all the answers."

I slide my feet inside the pipe and the muffled beating of hearts floods my ears. "Who's we exactly?" I call out through the dark. "Aiden. Where'd you go?"

He finds my hand and we skid down the pipe, the water soaking into the back of my pants. It's a steep incline and the water makes it slippery. The darkness of the air is thick and I can't see where we're going until we reach the bottom where a deep pool of water sits. He jerks me over onto a metal platform, saving us from landing in it. The tips of my hair are dripping and my pants are soaked. My boots are filled with water and they squeak as I follow him over to a barred door that has no handle and no lock.

He reaches into the pocket of his jacket and takes out a knife. My knife. The knife Monarch gave me. "Take this." He puts the knife in my hand.

I trace my thumb along the silver handle. "Who's behind the door?"

"No one dangerous," he says. "I just want you to trust me. That's all. "

I eye him warily and slide the knife into my back pocket.

He gives a small smile and raps on the door, this weird rhythm. Then a guy, a few years older than me, glides the door open. He has green eyes and hair as red as the rocks outside. There's this strange sharp thing poking out from the side of his eyebrow.

"Aiden what's up?" he says. "I didn't think you were gonna show up tonight." They slap hands and pat each other on the back. "So did everything go okay yesterday?" He asks.

"As okay as it ever does." Aiden says and both their eyes land on me. "This is Kayla," Aiden tells him.

The red-headed guy sticks out his hand. "Kayla, huh?" He looks like he's trying to figure out something, but then gives up. "I'm Greyson."

"Greyson," I say, holding my breath as I shake his hand. Fear. He fears I'll discover something downstairs, his heart drumming as though it's hiding dangerous secrets. Five more seconds and I might have pulled my knife out and forced him to divulge them.

But Aiden interrupts. "So are you going to let us in? Or make us stand out here all night?"

Greyson blinks and steps aside. "Yeah, sorry man. Come on in."

I'm always prepared for the worst, prepared to attack at any moment, kill with the swing of my blade. But what's just beyond the door is nothing I can be prepared for, because it's nothing I've known before. A stairway spirals down into to a large room, packed with people—more people than the hillside. Tables, and chairs are dotted around and noisy chatter and music flurries the air, excited and eager and without restraint. I've never seen so much disorder. It's mind blowing. And there's no fear that someone will show up and bust them for being so free.

"What are you thinking?" Aiden whispers in my ear.

I flinch, surprised by his sudden closeness—surprised by how my body reacts. "That it's amazing," I finally say, as truthful as I've ever been. "But I don't get it. Who are all these people? And why do they live separately from you?"

Aiden moves back and meets my eyes. "These are more of the previous Gathering members," he says.

"But there's so many of them," I say, still mind blown.

"That's because The Gathering happens more than you realize," he explains. "Which is part of the reason why we live separately—there's not enough space for everyone. Plus, these guys like things a little more noisy than we do over on the hillside."

I shake my head, my lips parted. "But I don't remember any of them getting chosen." My gaze scans the crowd searching for any sort of familiarity to any of their faces. But I come up blank.

"Do you remember anyone getting chosen?" Aiden starts down the stairs, the steps shaking under his movement.

"No." I follow, hand trailing down the railing, knowing I've thought this before.

"Do you want to know why?" he asks, reaching the bottom. "And I want you to consider your answer very carefully because once you say yes there's no turning back, even if you want to."

_"Once you give in Kayla, there's no going back," Monarch says. "You have to make sure you really want it."_

_"Want what?" I ask._

_"The truth," he says and something clanks in the distance._

_"But you told me never to ask for the truth," I reply, feeling the nervous energy bubble around us._

_"Always ask for the truth, Kayla." His words are soft, distant. "Just make sure the time is right."_

I blink away the forgotten memory. "Yes. I want to know, whatever it is."

He nods, not happy with my answer, nor sad. He takes my hand again and pushes us through the crowd. Some of their fears sneak up on me, but they're mild, compared to what I'm used to. Fears of snakes, vampires, of being alone.

"Are you okay?" Aiden hollers over the noise and I catch a few people eyeballing us, fixated with me.

I nod, my shoulder knocking into a large guy, holding a cup. He shoots me a glare, but then, once taking me in, smiles. "Is there something I'm missing?" I ask Aiden as we reach the end of the crowd.

"There are a lot of things you're missing." He winks at me, like we're sharing a private joke.

But I don't get the joke and when he sees that, he frowns. "Sorry," he mutters.

When we reach a doorway, guarded by two men, dressed in black with knives strapped to their belts, Aiden stops. Even though I can see their faces, my mind flashes back to The Colony—to the guards. To the bright red door.

"They're not Watchers," Aiden quickly assures me, noticing my hand drifting toward my pocket, where my knife rests.

I drop my hand to my side, but carry skepticism, which only expands as we descend down the hall, passing shut door after shut door that have people inside them—I know because I can hear their hearts. We halt in front of the very last door. Behind this one, there isn't a heart beating. There are no sounds or signs of human life.

He turns to me, blocking the door. "How much do you trust me?"

"I barely know you," I say.

He brushes the hair from his honey eyes, frustration tensing in his jawline. "I get that, but I'm asking you," he squeeze my hand gently, his heart pumping, "Do you trust me?"

Trust. "I guess so," I say, giving him the best answer I can.

He's saddened with it, and turns his back to me, giving three firm knocks on the door. "Just try to stay calm, okay."

"I always am," I let it slip out. My secret.

But he doesn't seem to care. A window slides open and another guard stands on the inside, with cautious eyes.

"I got a new one." Aiden nods at me.

This seems to be the right words for the guard. He slams the window shut and the door swings open.

"Prepare yourself," Aiden warns and steps back, letting me walk in first.

But nothing could prepare me for what's behind that door. It's a cemented room, but the walls shine silver. A single chair is all that occupies it. In the chair, sits a tall white figure, with its head hung, snow-white hair spilling over.

My boot scrapes the floor and it raises its head, staring at me with pale eyes.

A Higher.

# Chapter 17

I almost bolt, pull out my knife, stab Aiden and the guard and run like hell. Because nothing can explain this—nothing good anyway.

"You said this wasn't a Colony. You said there weren't any Highers around." My voice is calm, but carries a hint of warning. "You said I could trust you."

"You can," he answers, just as calm. "That's why I brought you here—to show you the truth."

"How did you get it?"

"It came from one of The Gatherings." He moves next to me, reaching for my hand, but I pull away. "Usually there are three Bellators dumped out into the dessert. But there was one specific time where one of these showed up in a body bag." He points his finger sharply at the Higher. "No one wanted to bring it back," he says. "But Dominic insisted we had to, so we did, but trapped it in here, so it wouldn't try to overtake things."

I tilt my head. "Who's Dominic?"

"You'll meet him soon," he says. "He's one of the original Gathering members—one of the first one's who was ever dumped and who built all of this."

"But why keep it alive?" I gaze the silver-lined room. "Why not just kill it and be done with it? I mean, is there really a point in keeping it?"

As if hearing my harsh words, the Higher lifts its head, its eyes pale and tired. "Ajuta-ma," he says weakly.

"What's wrong with him?" I ask. "Why is it so weak?"

Aiden scuffs his boot against the cement floor. "It's the silver. It weakens them."

"How do you know all this?" I ask.

He shrugs, holding a secret back he never wants me to find out.

"You're hiding something," I say. "What is it?"

"Maybe I should be asking you the same thing." He steps for me, getting in my face. "You're hiding something from me, Juniper, I can tell."

I freeze at the sound of my second name. "What did you just call me?"

"Kayla. I called you Kayla." His voice suggests composure, but the fear emitting from him tells me different. He's afraid of me finding out the truth from him.

I back for the door. "Who are you really? And why do you know that name? No one calls me that but Tristan."

I watch to see if he recognizes Tristan's name. He does. His face reddens and he lowers his voice, breathing hotly against my cheek. "Does Tristan know about this?" He touches my arm, pouring his fear through me. "Or that you're never afraid."

I'm gone, out the door before he can utter more words that don't make sense. I smack the guard down that blocks my way and run down the hall, fast, knocking down people as I push through the crowd and dash up the stairs. I draw my knife out as I reach the exit door.

The red-headed guy—Greyson steps in my way. "Nuh uh. You can't go out—it's dark."

"I don't care," I say. "Let me out."

"Hey, take it easy." He holds up his hands. "No one's here to hurt you, Kayla."

Something about the way he says my name sends me over the edge. It's like I'm back in The Colony, facing Gabrielle as he taunts me with things he knows, but won't tell.

"Get out of my way." I reach for the doorknob.

He snatches my hand. "I said you can't go out right now."

With one swift swing of my fist, he crumples to the ground, unconscious. I step over him and jerk the door open, sprinting out onto the metal platform. A deep breath and then I'm running up the pipe, water splashing underneath my boots as I climb higher. My fingers slide against the water and so do my shoes, but eventually I break through to higher ground, knowing he's following not too far behind.

I burst through the top and slip into the water. "Dammit." I splash forward, but pause at the sight of them. While I was down there, darkness fell and the vampires woke up. Worse, they all seemed to migrate here, surrounding the water, outlines of shadows, snapping their fangs viciously.

Even after what happened last night, I have to be reluctant. Because if something's changed—if they've suddenly decided they like the taste of me—then I'm dead. I wait, testing their reactions as they sniff the air.

"Kayla, back up slowly." It's Aiden's voice, trying to lure me back into the pipe.

When the vampires hear him, their eyes rain blood, little drops of red, bleeding into the water I'm standing in.

"Don't you mean Juniper?" I back up as the bloody water swims for me.

One of the vampires lets out a shriek, then the rest cackle like coyotes.

"Dammit Kayla." He jumps into the water. "You can't run off before I explain things—just let me explain, please. I swear to God, I'll tell you everything."

He's right behind me, taking me by the hands and I make the choice, letting him pull me back into the darkness of the pipe. We slide down and again, he manages to maneuver us onto the platform without dunking us into the pool of water first.

Immediately, I wiggle my hand loose from his, push him back, his shoulder banging into the wall. I draw out my knife. "Tell me how you know it? Tell me how you know that name?"

He rubs his shoulder. "I know it because I knew you in The Colony."

"But I don't know you." I point the sharp blade of my knife at his throat. "And even if you did know me, only two people know that name. And one of them is dead." My breathing increases as I say these words aloud.

"Which one?" His voice is gentle.

"What does it matter?" I sound choked.

"Because it does."

My grip loosens on my knife. "Monarch." His name sticks on my tongue like glue.

"Kayla," he whispers my name softly. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine." I blink away the moisture in my eyes.

Giving me a sympathetic look, he slowly moves my knife away from his throat and opens his arms.

I flinch back. "What are you doing?"

He frowns, like I've slapped him. "Giving you a hug."

I back away, shaking my head. "Tell me how you know all this stuff about me? I mean we'd have to be close."

He drops his arms, discouraged. "Because we're—we used to be, friends."

"Then why can't I remember anything about you?" I ask. "Have you been gone for that long?"

He takes a cautious step toward me, like he's approaching a skittish animal. "You can't remember because you can't remember a lot of things."

I suddenly realize how nervous and jumpy I'm acting, like most of The Colony members I used to know. I calm myself, letting my head regain composure.

"Are you sure you want to hear this?" He asks. "Because, I feel like I have to warn you—the truth can be really ugly sometimes. You'll learn horrible things about the people you knew—about yourself—that you might not want to know. But it's your choice. Like I said before, everything's your choice now." He holds his hand out. "Either you can come with me, and I'll take you to the truth. Or you can go out there and run away from it—this time I won't stop you." He folds his arms, looking confident, but his hand shakes, fearing my answer, fearing I'll choose to run and leave him.

But I already know what I have to do. I'm not a coward and Monarch said he wanted me to find the truth, when the time was right. And this feels right. So as ugly and horrible as the truth might be, it's still the truth—it's still real.

I don't take his hand, but step for the door. "Take me to the truth then."

He nods, letting out a breath and opens the door. We go back to the crowded room, passing by Greyson on our way. His face has a purple lump, right where my fist slammed his cheek.

"What wrong with his face?" I trot down the stairs. "I didn't do that, did I?"

He frowns. "It's called a bruise and yeah, you did it. Sometimes what you do in here has different consequences from in The Colony, so you have to be more careful."

I point at the white line tracing below his eye and down his cheek. "So is that a bruise?"

He traces his finger along it. "No, that's called my freedom."

# Chapter 18

In a small room, tucked out of the sight of people, I meet a man who calls himself Cedrix. The walls of the room are concrete—not silver like the walls where the Higher is trapped. These walls deafen all noise and it relaxes me a little. Two chairs stand in the middle and a wooden cabinet curves the corner. It reminds me of the hospital a little, only less sterile and without beds.

Cedrix is a tall man, with dark skin, and brown hair cropped short. He's also missing a hand, which doesn't make sense. Hands aren't supposed to be missing, people aren't supposed to have bruises or white lines imperfecting their skin.

"That's Cedrix's freedom," Aiden explains when he notices me staring at Cedrix's missing hand.

"Your freedom seems painful," I say to Cedrix.

Cedrix smiles softly. "Yes, but I'm happier with it gone. It reminds me of how painful things could be." He gestures at the chair. "Whenever you're ready, Kayla, take a seat."

I give him a funny look. "Do I know you?"

He nods. "You do."

"And why am I getting in the chair?"

"You want to remember, right?" He pauses, glancing at Aiden. "You haven't explained this to her?"

"I was afraid I'd mess it up," Aiden replies, glancing in my direction. "Because I know her."

Cedrix shakes his head as he plops down in a chair. "Then I guess you can wait outside."

Aiden nods quickly, seeming anxious as he turns for the door.

I catch his elbow. "Why can't he stay?" I ask Cedrix.

"It's better if he waits outside." He scoots his chair forward, closer to the other chair. "He can come back when this is all over."

I reluctantly release Aiden's arm and he gives me an encouraging smile, before disappearing out the door.

I swallow hard and take a seat in a chair. "I feel like I'm about to be tortured."

He takes a glass vial out of the cabinet, filled with a clear liquid. "The mind is an amazing thing, really," he says, shaking the vial. "It really is. It stores things forever, even when we sometimes want to forget... or when outside forces force us to forget."

_"Forget me, for now," Monarch whispers. "But remember me later, when it's time."_

I blink. "What?"

"Outside forces, like the Highers," He clarifies, frowning. "Are you okay? You seem different from the others that come in here."

"You keep talking about forgetting." I wrap my fingers around the armrests and rest back. "Are you talking about blackouts, because sometimes it seems like things are missing from life."

"Like you wake up somewhere and can't remember how you got there?" He asks, nodding. "Yes, that's exactly what I'm talking about. Did it happen to you a lot?"

I consider this. "I can't remember." But it's a lie.

He nods, flipping my wrist over. Then he leans back and takes out another vial, one filled with a purple liquid.

"I've seen that before," I tell him. "Back in The Colony's hospital."

"And probably many times," he says and holds the vile up between his finger. "Because it's what causes the little gaps in your memories."

I almost choke. Monarch put that medicine in me. Monarch erased my mind?

"Now Kayla, I'm going to give you two options and I don't do it for everyone, only for special cases like yourself," he continues. "Sometimes, people come here from The Colony, just ordinary Bellators who just happen to be a talented fighter. But sometimes there are Bellators who are different—unique—and for those I offer another choice." He flips the purple vile into the palm of his hand. "I can make you forget everything, so that you can wake up believing this has always been your life."

"Why would you do that?" I bite at my thumbnail. "And what do you mean by unique?" I ask, wondering if he knows all my secrets.

"Unique in the sense that the things you're going to remember are going to be painful," he says. "But it's your choice. Either I can inject the purple—the _radieră_ into you and you can go on your way, thinking this is how it's always been, or I can give you the clear—the _minte_ and we can gradually start unwinding what's tangled up inside your head."

I notice the fact that the names' of the medicines are spoken in the language of the Highers. "I won't remember everything all at once?"

He shakes his head. "It's a slow process, especially if your memories are painful. But like I said, you can choose to forget, if you want."

"Were you a unique case?" I ask and he nods. "And what did you choose?"

He raises his missing hand. "I chose to remember."

It's like I've been waiting for this moment my whole life and I know what I have to do, without even thinking about it. I tap the clear vial with my finger. "I want to remember."

He presses his lips together and with a grave expression, nods. "Okay, then." He places the purple vial back in the drawer, takes out a syringe, and stabs it into the vial. "Brace yourself, Kayla" he says and then inserts the needle into my arm.

My hands clutch onto the armrest. I suck in a breath of air as the clear medicine pumps through my veins. I wait for my memory, but I can only see red.

* * *

_Blood._

_Blood everywhere._

_I can't see through the blood._

_I scream, but is it for real? Or in my head?_

_Pain. Pain surrounds me. My skin peels away as I claw at my own flesh._

_Someone screams murder, not me, but a small child. I rock back and forth, grabbing at my hair. Lights flicker on and off, the walls rattle—there's so much blood._

_"Make it stop!" I cry._

_Flashes of light, needles piercing. I can't breathe. I don't know who I am. Or where I am._

_Then I see it: the red door. Watchers guard it. But I'm inside, not out—I'm trapped._

_Help, I want to scream, but my lips are sewn together. I raise my hands, blood covering them. Not my blood. Someone else's._

_A river of blood pours down from the ceiling and I drown in it._

* * *

I'm screaming. My eyes are open, my gaze darting around the room. Cedrix. Aiden. They are both restraining me. I knock them to their backs and am on my feet before either of them can figure out what happened.

"What did you do to me?" I breath loud, a breath that is not my own—a fearful breath.

Cedrix holds up his hand. "Easy, Kayla, we're not going to hurt you."

I back for the door, shaking my head. "What was that?"

"Kayla." Cedrix stands. "You need to calm down. I warned you that what you saw might not be pretty."

"Might not be pretty." I tug at my hair, wanting to forget whatever it was I saw.

"Kayla." It's Aiden who speaks, soft and soothing. "Just give me your hand. It's all going to be okay. No one here is going to hurt you."

I let go of my hair, realizing how bad I'm trembling. I stare at his hand for a moment, before taking it and the softness of his pulse soothes me.

He lets out a breath, flicking a glance at Cedrix. "I'm going to take her to get something to drink," he tells him. "See if I can get her to calm down."

Cedrix nods, but points at my arms. "Clean her up first. We don't want anyone else to know what's going on."

I turn my free arm over, my jaw dropping at the blood trailing my arm. "What happened to me?"

"You did it to yourself." Aiden leads me to the cupboard.

Cedrix stands. "Get her a drink and then come back," he says. "I need to talk to Dominic, but I want to see her again when she's calmed down."

Aiden nods and then Cedrix leaves, closing the door behind him.

"I'm not thirsty," I say as I sit down and Aiden dabs my arm with a rag.

"This drink is not for thirst," he says. "It's to calm you down."

He wipes at my other arm, cleaning the blood away so that all that remains is my smooth skin, decorated with faint pink lines that are already vanishing. Then he tosses the rag into a trash bin and he pulls me to my feet and out the door. But I can feel it now: his fear. He fears I've done something wrong.

And so do I.

# Chapter 19

"Feeling better?" he asks me.

I nod, setting the cup on the table.

We're out in the main room, the one everyone crowds. When we first came in, I endured a lot of stares. Aiden says it's because I'm new and they'll get over it eventually.

"You know we all saw things we didn't want to see," Aiden calls to me over the crowd.

I nod, taking a sip of the cherry red drink that tastes sweeter than anything else that's ever touched my lips.

"But you'll get over it and learn to move on," he adds and then pauses. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I shake my head, staring into the cup. "Why did I scratch my arms like that?"

"I don't know." And he really doesn't. "But don't worry. It'll get easier. Everything does."

I give him a fake smile from across the table.

"Don't do that." He frowns. "Don't put up a wall."

"I'm not." I lie.

Abruptly, he's on his feet and leading me to a dark corner, away from the ears of everyone.

"Are you sure you want to talk about it?" he asks softly. "Maybe I can help you deal with it."

"You could help by telling me some things about me," I suggest, not wanting to taste the potent taste of the clear liquid ever again.

He shakes his head, his dark bangs falling into his eyes. "If I did, then you might not remember things at all. It's how it works. If I tell you stuff that _I_ know it could interfere with the things _you_ know."

"Oh." I frown at my cup.

"Kayla," he says. "Whatever you saw—no matter how bad it is—there's still good things. I promise." His honey eyes sparkle in the faint light. He leans in, his lips so close and his breath tickles my ear. "I can't talk about it with you, but can I suggest that maybe next time you should be thinking of me before you go under."

I lean back, exploring his eyes, wondering just how good of friends we were back inside The Colony.

"It'll get better." He winks at me. "Juniper."

The sound of my nickname rolling off his tongue causes my body to shiver. "Do I frighten you?"

His expression twists in confusion. "What?"

My grip tightens around the cup. "Do you ever think I'll hurt you?"

He spits out his drink, red liquid splattering all over the floor and dirt walls. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. "Frighten me? Are you joking?"

"So I take it that's a no?" I take another sip of my drink, slowly, breathing in the sweet scent, trying to forget all the blood I saw all over my hands.

He sets his cup down on a chair and wipes his hands on his jeans. "Yeah, that's a no."

"Has anyone ever remembered things wrong?" I ask. "Or have they not understood what they were seeing?"

He has no idea what I'm talking about. "I don't think so."

I'm yanked back to my lying ways, not wanting to reveal what I saw—not wanting him to know I'm different. "Never mind." I glance around, avoiding his questioning gaze. "So what do we do now? Just wait until morning then go back to the hillside? I'm really eager to check up on Maci."

"Maci's fine," he says, his gaze burning into the back of my head. "And we need to go see Cedrix before we leave."

"And when will that be?"

"He'll let us know when he's ready." He pauses, sliding his hand across the table and entwining our fingers. "I have an idea." He lifts me to my feet and leads me across the room. I still carry my cup, some of it spilling on the floor. This time instead of going up, we go down, taking a flight of stairs that dips us deeper underground. The air is heavier and damper, but it's far enough that it shuts away the noise and fear pulsating from people and my head feels clearer.

"Who built this place?" I ask as we wind down the long, narrow tunnel lit up by the same lanterns as the hillside.

He lets go of my hand, but only to pick up a lantern. "I think it was originally an old shelter where people hid from the vampires when the disease first started to spread."

"How did it end up empty?" I wonder. "Did they all die?"

He shrugs, his head bumping the ceiling and he brushes the dirt from his hair. "The first Gathering members made it bigger and turned it into all this." He gestures at the walls and ground.

"So who built your place then?" I ask.

"It was just there," he says. "There are actually a lot of places like that burrowed into the hillsides and I'm sure they'll start to fill up with more ex-colony members the more time goes by."

The tunnel opens into a small, rounded room. The floor is carved with brick and the walls with rocks, which have chains twisting from them. Lanterns swing from ceiling, giving the room an eerie glow.

"What is this room used for?" I jingle one of the chains. "To lock people up after you stab them in the neck with a needle."

He walks around the edge of the room, touching the chains as he passes them. "I already told you, I didn't stab you in the neck with a needle."

I touch the spot on my neck where the needle sunk in. "Yeah, you never did explain what happened. Or why I blacked out." I pause. "You didn't dope me up with that _radieră,_ did you?"

He shakes his head, fiddling with the chain. "We don't dope people up with _radieră_ he _re."_

"You say it like you use something else." I set the cup on the ground, spouts of lightheadedness rushing through me. "Do you dope them up with some else?" I inch toward him, not even sure what I'm doing "Tell me what you're hiding," I whisper in his ear, running my hands through his hair. "What'd you stab me in the neck with?"

His heart rate speeds up and shortly after, his breath matches it. He's scared of losing me, scared that I'll stop touching him, but at the same time is scared that I am.

I start to pull away, but he catches my hands. "Don't," he breathes in my ear, the sound of his voice quivering down my spine. His eyes are a blur, his lips melting. Then he brushes them against my neck and I shiver, understanding what Nina was talking about. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I melt my body into his, wanting to be closer to him.

"Juniper." His voice is hoarse and I love that it is. His lips touch my cheek.

I stop breathing. Or was I even breathing to being with. Who am I really? Then the walls start to bleed and that's when I know, none of this is real.

"What's happening to me?" My voice droops.

"I'm sorry." His voice fades like my mind. I try to move back, but he stops me.

"You put something in that drink," I murmur. "Didn't you?" His silence is the only answer I need. "You told me I could trust you." My voice falls away from my lips as my limbs grow heavy.

He catches me, preventing me from slamming into the floor. "I'm sorry," he says again as the lanterns flickers in and out of focus. "But we have to know. We just have to."

# Chapter 20

When I open my eyes again, I see the same brick floor and rock walls that enclosed around me. But now I'm alone. And I'm chained up. Again.

"Dammit," I curse, rolling on my back. That's twice in a day's time. I stumble to my feet, woozy and disoriented, stabbing pains piercing my muscles. "What was in that drink," I mumble, pressing my hand to my head.

"Sugar, water, and cherry-flavored syrup."

I scowl as my eyes find Aiden, leaning against the doorway, arms crossed, eyes not as welcoming as they were before I passed out.

"And a high amount of silver," he adds.

"Silver?" My head throbs as my vision alters into focus. "Why silver?"

He moves from the wall, stopping within the limitations of the chains reach. "Not a lot of people know this, but silver is extremely toxic to vampires. It's more toxin than even sodium chloride."

"But I'm not a vampire," I walk until the chains are taut. "So why make me take it?" I shake my head, confused. "You didn't think I was one, did you?" I raise my arms, showing him my smooth skin, free of bleeding wounds and rotting flesh. "Because I can assure you I'm as human as you are."

"Yeah, I got that, since the silver didn't kill you," he says. "But we had to know for sure."

"But you still have me chained up," I point out the obvious.

"Because we're still not sure about you," he says. "You did some things that are strange."

"Like what?" I scratch my wrist, the cuffs digging into them.

"You can walk with the vampires." He says this softly as if he worries someone will hear him.

My hands fall to my side. "How do you know that?"

He shuts his eyes and shakes his head, like he's in pain. "Because we were watching you that night, during the rainstorm."

"So you just watched as all our lives were threatened?"

A lantern flashes above his head and he stares up at it. "We were going to save you—it's what we do every time the Gathering happens. But we were running late that day and didn't make it there before dark. And when we did find you, you were, standing out in the dark, in the middle of the rain, while all the vampires scattered, trying to get away from you. We didn't know what to do."

"So you what? Just left us?" I say. "Why bother even returning?"

"We didn't just leave you," he says. "We had to come back and tell Dominic what happened. And he told us to go get you and bring you back to him." He kicks at the floor with the tip of his boot. "I'm sorry, Kayla. I really am. But this is the way things are done around here. We have to be careful that we don't bring anything dangerous in."

"Then this place is no better than The Colony," I say.

"I'm sorry you feel that way." He turns for the doorway.

"I'm not a vampire," I call after him, yanking at the chains. "I'm not a blood thirsty monster—I can't be."

But he's already out the door and I choke on my words. I slump down on the floor and lean my head against the wall. Is this how it's always going to be? Am I always going to be locked up?

_"Sometimes people will fear you, what you can do," Monarch says. "That's why we have to keep you who you really are hidden until the time is right."_

I glance around, even though I know the voice was in my head. "And when will that time be?" I call out, listening to my voice echo through the tunnel.

Time slips away, I lay down on the ground, like a lonely soldier, resting my eyes to prepare myself for whatever comes next.

* * *

I'm woken up by the sound of low voice and the pitter-patter of footsteps.

"Are you sure she's just asleep?" A guy's voice, soft and mysterious.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Aiden said the silver didn't kill her."

I slowly lift my eyelids and slide my hand over a sharp rock.

"But sometimes it just takes a while, doesn't it?"

"No," he says. "And wishing she was dead isn't going to make this easier."

I wrap my fingers around the rock, the edges cutting into the palm of my hand as I scoot it toward me.

"Yeah, but do you know how many times she saved my ass while we were out raiding?" he says. "She's not a bad person."

"Doesn't matter." Footsteps approach me. "We all know how this works—once they turn, there's no going back."

"That's not true—there was Xander. Besides, I can't see her choosing to turn into one of them." A hand lightly touches my shoulder. They go to roll me over, but I'm on my feet and have them flipped around before the other one can react. It's Greyson, who I have trapped in my arms, his fiery red hair giving him away.

"Who has the keys," I say, pressing the sharp rock to Greyson's throat, not hard enough to break skin, but hard enough for him to know I will if I have to.

The other guy, with dark golden hair and piercing brown eyes backs away with his hands up. "No one does, okay." His heart is all over the place. He's afraid, which makes it difficult to tell if he's lying.

"Tell me where the keys are or I'll kill him." What's frightening is that I'm not even sure if I'm lying.

Greyson thinks I'm telling the truth. His heart's slamming against his chest. "We don't have the keys, Kayla. I swear we don't."

Aggravation builds. Do I have it in me? Can I really shed the blood of a human, just to save myself? "Dammit." I drop the rock and shove Greyson away from me.

"What's wrong with you?" Greyson cries, clutching his neck. "You were never this mean before. God, you really must be one of them."

Giving some slack on the chains, I say, "In case you forgot, vampires are hideous blood sucking monsters."

He massages his neck, which has gone red. "Not a vampire, Kayla."

I pause. "Then what?"

He only smiles, revengeful. "I guess we'll all find out soon enough."

Then they leave me alone with my thoughts, which are unsettling. What else could there be that they think I am? There are only three kinds of breeds that I know of: Humans, vampires, and... Highers. I scan over my skin: white, but not as white as the Highers. I lift a strand of my hair, which is black as ash. And the last time I checked my eyes were still brown.

But what else could they mean?

# Chapter 21

Time creeps by so slowly it drowns me. I hate not knowing what's going to happen to me, or what has happened to Maci. And even Bernard. I just left them, defenseless.

Two guards finally enter my dungeon and my mind flashes back to a scene at The Colony, when two Watchers hauled me away to the bright red door; a door I now know that, at one time or another, I was locked behind and covered with blood.

This time the guards' faces are blocked out by masks. Gloves cover their hands, boots lace up their legs, and they wear grey padded suits, like their trying to protect every part of their body. Each one has a knife strapped to their belt. They fear me—I can sense it all over them, like the blood flowing in their veins.

"Stand," the taller one orders through his mask.

I remain sitting on my butt. "Why?"

A huff through a mask. "Get to your feet, now."

I don't like it, but not seeing an alternative, I get to my feet, the chains lugging with me.

"Put your hands out," the other guard commands.

Feeling as though I shifted through time and landed back in The Colony, I obey, raising my arms. The guard clips a cuff to each of my wrists. The cuffs are linked by a short chain that forces my arms together. Then they cuff my legs together, leaving me just enough room to walk, and stealing away my chances of running. They unclip me from the wall and march, one in front of me and one behind, forcing me to move with them. We go back through the tunnel, upstairs, through the packed room, where everyone watches me like I'm some kind of foul creature that's even worse than a vampire.

I'm not one to cower. I hold my head high, indicating I'm not afraid of them. But they fear me—the air reeks of it. I don't spot Aiden in the crowd, but that's okay. I'd rather not see him anyway. He's already made it perfectly clear what he thinks of me—and he's lost my trust because of it.

The guards take me down the hall, where the room is that holds the Higher. At first, I wonder if that's where we're going. Perhaps they're going to shove me in with him and let him kill me. But instead they take me to the door opposite his room. They click a key in a lock and push the door open. Then they quickly unlock the chains, shove me inside, and slam the door shut. I hear it click as they lock it, then nothing but silence and my own breath.

The room I stand in is fairly large, all walls padded except for one, which is made of glass. From the other side, a group of people stare at me like I'm a science experiment, sitting in their chairs, fearing what they'll see, yet they still watch.

I stare at them, not blinking, not moving and it seems to spook them even more. In some weird and sick twisted way, I enjoy that they are afraid of me. At least for the moment, anyway.

A few seconds later, the lights dim to a low blue and the door slowly crawls open. Then something I never would have anticipated comes stumbling inside.

A vampire.

What is this? Some kind of sacrificial ritual?

It slumps to the floor, unconscious, drooling out a puddle of red. Its wounds are fresh and foul, its body still, likes it is dead. But it's not. When vampires die, their bodies lose all flesh, so there's nothing left but bones.

I itch my nose, holding my breath, waiting for it to move. When it does, it's sporadic and impulsive, like it's overly crazed, even for one of them. Fangs sharpen from its blood-stained lips as it paces back and forth in front of me. Its bloody eyes are all over me, taking me in, deciding whether it wants to take a bite out of me.

I back away, pressing my back against the wall. It sniffs the air like a dog and its lifeless eyes lock on me. Then it charges and I'm shocked. But my leg reacts mechanically, giving a quick blow to the vampire's stomach. The vampire staggers back, but regains its balance swiftly and comes at me again. I duck to the side, but it catches the hem of my shirt. I twist around and throw my fist into its nose. It screams, not out of pain, but with fury. Its fangs nip, ready to kill me. I try to squirm free, but it throws me to the ground and my skull bangs against the floor. I try to get up, but everything's spinning.

The vampire shrieks and then moves for me, about to sink its fangs into my neck. But then it hesitates, a quick pause, its body freezing, almost looking human as it contemplates what to do next.

Then, just like the previous two times, it tilts back its head and shouts, "No!" It goes to the door and claws at the metal until its nails bleed raw. The people through the glass window gasp and I know I'm in trouble because obviously they've never seen this before.

The vampire continues to let out shriek after shriek as it scratches and bangs its head at the door. The room starts to flood with silver smoke and it collapses. I hack out my lungs but force myself to stay awake. I hear someone enter, a soft rustle, then a crash. I hunt for the door, but the smoke's too thick and I end up running into the wall.

The door bangs shut, but I'm not alone. The pounding of a heart crams the room like a virus. I stifle my breath and scan the fog. Footsteps pad toward me and I lie down on the ground, flat on my stomach, and crawl across the floor.

The footsteps pause. I press the side of my face to the cold ground, where the smoke is thinner, and spot a set of clunky boots. They move to the left, then the right, before stopping again.

"Kayla." The voice rings with familiarity, another lost person from The Colony.

I press my lips together, my gaze locked on the boots.

"Kayla." The boots pace. "Either we can do this the hard way or the easy way."

I keep still.

A breath of frustration. "Well, then."

The boots disappear, but the door doesn't shut. I start to crawl, but an army of boots rush in. A hand grabs my neck and a needle plunges into it, poison pumps through my veins like fire. My eyes roll into the back of my head as the world slips away.

# Chapter 22

_"Kayla, listen to me," Monarch says, his voice a whisper, so far away. "This is important. Are you listening?"_

_"Yes," I reply in a hollow tone as fog dances around me._

_"Good, now I need you to remember, when the time is right," he rushes his words, fearful of not having enough time. "I need you to remember that the answers are in the watch."_

_"What watch?" I ask._

_"The watch I gave you." He sighs. "Everything happens for a reason, Kayla. And when the time comes, I need you to put everything together. I need you to fix all of this."_

_"Fix all of what?" I ask._

_"Fix the world, Kayla. Fix it back to what it was. Fix my mistakes," he says. "You're the only one who can."_

_"What mistakes?" I question. "And how will I know when the time is right?"_

_I get no reply as the fog surrounds me._

* * *

My eyelids thunder open like zaps of lightning bolts. I need the watch—Monarch's pocket watch. My cheek is pressed to a cold brick floor, my wrists and ankles adjoined by chains again, and a lantern sparks above my head. I sit up, only to find that I'm not alone. At first I think he's a Higher, but his snow-white hair is more a sign of age then of purity. His eyes are a dull grey and his skin is creased with wrinkles. In a way, he kind of reminds me of Monarch, only older.

He's sitting in a chair, his legs crossed as he stares at the pages of a book.

"Who are you?" I stand, maintaining my balance even though it's difficult.

His gaze lifts from the book and he smiles. "Hello, Kayla."

I recognize his voice as the one through the smoke. "Do I know?" I ask and he nods. "From The Colony?"

He rises to his feet, tall and brittle. "Do you know what these are?" He holds up the book, showing me the words.

"I don't know how to read," I admit, not ashamed, but wishing I did.

"Hmm?" He says tapping his finger against his lip.

"No one from The Colony does." I feel the need to defend myself.

"Some do," he says and then sticks out his hand for me to shake. "My name is Dominic." I'm hesitant to shake his hand, but he insists so I do. "You've changed a lot since the last time I saw you," he says.

"And how long ago was that?" I ask. "One year, two years, because I honestly have no idea who you are."

"Yes, I know." He takes a seat and gestures at the chair across from him. "Please, have a seat."

Shackled and chained, I sit down in the chair. "Are the chains really necessary?"

"Maybe, maybe not," he answers. "But when in doubt, we leave them on."

_Always a prisoner._ "What do you want from me?"

"That's a really good question." He picks up a cup and sips from it. "And it's not what we want from you, but what you want from us."

"I don't want anything from you," I say. "Except for you to let me go."

"That, I can't do." He presses his fingers to the sides of his nose, a gesture that reminds me of Monarch. "You've put me in a very difficult situation. And I'm not sure what to do. I never thought Monarch would stoop so low... but I guess maybe it was a panicked situation." He meets my eyes. "Was that it? Was that why he did it?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I say. "I really don't."

He gives a quiet laugh, shaking his head. "He built you well—making sure to include you are a brilliant liar." He takes another sip of his water. "It's a good tool to have, you know—keeps people out of your head."

I start to say something, but stop. "I don't... what are you saying?"

His gaze spears me. "You really don't know, do you? About what we did? About where you came from?"

I shake my head slowly, my mind shifting back to the red door, the blood, the scream. "Who's we?"

He sighs. "Me and Monarch... I used to be a doctor at The Colony."

"But you're out here, now." I say. "I thought only Bellators were chosen for The Gathering."

"I am a Bellator. Or was one anyway," He says and when I eye him, he adds, "Don't let this weak old body fool you. Looks can be deceiving, like yours." He's speaking to himself not me. He scoots his chair forward. "I'm going to get right to the point, Kayla. There's no more tiptoeing around it. I think you're Higher."

I'm stunned, my arms loose on my lap, my mouth hanging open. "How can I be a Higher? No one can just become a Higher."

"Someone can become a Higher just as easily as someone can become a vampire," he says. "You just have to know the right people, who know the right medicine." He stabs a finger in my direction. "And you know the right people."

"You're talking about Monarch." I'm shaking my head. "No, he wouldn't do something like that."

He raises his eyebrows. "Just like he wouldn't erase your mind?" He pauses when he sees how upset I'm getting. "Don't worry, he only did it because he had to. It was the only way he could fix the world or at least that's what he thinks."

_What he thought._ I run my hand across my face, the metal links of the chain dragging across my cheek. "I'm not a Higher." I meet his eyes. "Black hair. Brown eyes. And I don't like to slaughter people."

"Sometimes, the transformation takes time," he says. "Eventually, you'll turn, just like they all did."

"Even if what you're saying is true—if Monarch did create the Highers, he wouldn't change me into one. I know he wouldn't. He cares... cared about me too much."

Dominic leans forward, overlapping his brittle fingers. "He would, if he thought it would save you from being discovered."

"Discovered?" I ask.

His expression is attentive. "Have you ever wondered how The Colony came to exist? Why everyone ended up there? How the Highers ended up in control? Why they put salt in the water that surrounds The Colony when silver would work much better?" His voice is low, pressing each word as he speaks. "Because that's how they wanted it."

His words confuse my head. "I'm not sure what you're saying. I'm trying to, but it doesn't make any sense to me. Why would anyone want things like that?"

"I think the question you should be asking is why wouldn't they," he says. "I mean think about it. All that power, control, perfection. It's what everyone wants, isn't?"

I shake my head.

"Well it's what Monarch wanted with you," he says with a smile. "But I guess he just couldn't get there. Still, turning you into a Higher, just to preserve what he did, that takes guts."

I want to kick the old man to the ground. I slide to the end of my chair, my knee twitching.

"Easy," he says. "I'm only giving you the truth, which is hard. What Monarch and I did wasn't right. And what he was trying to do to fix it definitely isn't right."

My eyes skim my veins, barely visible through my skin. "I'm not a Higher," I mumble, trying to convince myself more than anything. "I can't be."

He smiles sympathetically. "Maybe that's true, but I can't wait around to see if you'll change. It's too dangerous. I'm sure you understand the damage just one Higher can do."

"But you keep that other one around," I argue. "Locked away in that room."

"And having one around is enough to keep me awake at night," he says. "But the only way we know how to kill a Higher, is by the hand of another Higher and since we have two now we can at least get rid of one." He stands. "It'd be better if you'd both just eliminate each other, but I don't see that happening so..." He starts for the door.

"So what was all that crap with the vampire," I call out, desperate to keep the conversation going, desperate to keep living.

"A test," he says, without turning.

"And did I pass or fail."

A pause. "I'm not sure." He sighs and faces me. "Don't worry Kayla, eventually we all will die. Some just sooner than others."

_"Everything must die, it's a part of life. Not doing so, now that's going against nature. I should have realized this sooner."_

"Even the Highers," I say. "Because from what you said—with the only way for them to die is by the hand of another Higher—I don't see a death in their near future."

He smiles, tapping his head. "You're clever—another thing Monarch did right. It really is a shame he had to end it like this." Then he's leaving again, already almost to the doorway.

"So what? You're just going to kill me because you think I might be a Higher?" I shout after him.

"It's for the best, Kayla," he says. "Even if you aren't, what you can do goes against nature any way, whether Monarch thinks so or not. He can't fix his mistakes by trying to play God." One last smile and he's out the door. I start to run, slowly, because I'm chained. But a group of guards mob the room, boots marching against the floor as they corner me against the wall.

"Time to die, Kayla."

I'm not sure which one of the assholes says it.

They seize the chains and take me up the stairs, but I don't make it easy for them. I kick and fight the whole way. But it doesn't do any good. As strong as I am, there are too many of them. They drag me through the ridiculing crowd and back to the glass room. But just as they're about to lock me up, Aiden runs up.

"Hold on," he says, but one of the guards steps in front of him, sticks a hand out and shoves him back. "I just want to say goodbye to her. That's all." The guard doesn't budge and he continues, "Please," he says in an angelic voice. "She used to be a friend of mine."

Winning the guard over, he steps aside and lets Aiden by.

I back up, not wanting him near me. "Stay away from me."

He pulls me in for a hug anyway, backing us into a corner and pressing our bodies together, like we're lovers. I think about kneeing him between the legs until he whispers, "The keys to the cuffs." He slips them and something else into my pocket. "And a knife."

Then he's gone, pushing past the guards and disappearing down the hall. He doesn't give me an explanation or any instructions on what to do next. I think it's right then and there that I realize just how well he knows me.

Because I can do a lot of damage with a knife. No instructions needed.

The guards shove me into the glass room. There are no people watching me from the other side this time. I'm all alone, a prisoner, waiting for the right moment to unlock myself and fight for my life.

The door squeaks open and someone steps in, dressed in white, hair like snow, perfect features.

The Higher, ready to take my life so he can preserve his own.

# Chapter 23

Highers can only be killed by another Higher.

I quickly grab the keys and unlock the cuffs, the chains hitting the ground with a clack. Taking out the knife, I step back, until I press against the wall. The knife is small but sharp and shimmers in the light.

"Do you remember me?" The Higher asks, taking a lazy step toward me. He's dressed in ratty clothes, but the perfection of his existence outshines the minor flaw. "Do you know who I am?"

"Am I supposed to?" I poise my knife in front of me.

"Well, I know you." Another slow step. "An abomination. Just like the rest of us."

I sidestep toward the glass. "What does that mean?"

He doesn't answer, chanting away in the Higher's language. Another step and another and I'm right in front of the glass.

"You know why they put me in here?" He asks.

"To kill me." I tap my knife, testing the thickness of the glass. "Because they think I'm like you—they think I'm a Higher."

"That's one reason," he says. "But there's more to it than that. There's more to everything that just simplicity. Everything has an underlining meaning." He brushes his snow-white hair back, revealing a small tear in his faultless skin. "Not everything is what it seems." He rolls up his sleeves showing me the same set of numbers like on Cedrix's skin, only they're different numbers. "Even I'm not one of them, at least not on the inside."

"One of what? A Higher? Because you look just like them." But my eyes catch the tear in his skin. "Almost."

"I didn't use to." He rolls down his sleeve. "And I'm still not completely, because that was never supposed to the point. The point was to change me back, but that never happened."

"Change you back?"

He takes a deep breath and I pick up on a sense of fear flowing off him, but can't quite grasp what it is. "I was an experiment that didn't work."

"An experiment?"

"I use to be a human, Kayla." He walks around the room, with his hands tucked behind him. "Honestly, I had no idea what they did to me until I was tossed out here and Dominic started trying to resurface my memories." He pauses, his pale eyes pained. "It was awful, all the blood spilled, all the needles, and the more I saw the more I wanted to forget it again. And I did, for a while, but then I started to change and it all caught up with me." He holds up his hands. "Eventually I turned into this and I was locked up in a room lined with silver."

"But I thought they said that silver made vampires weak?" I say. "Not Highers."

He presses a smile. "Aren't they almost one and the same?" He's right in front of me, the tip of my knife grazing against his chest. "You know, I can feel my humanity slipping away from me every day, even though I fight it. Soon, I know I'll be just like them. And I don't want it—not at all. But I never really had a choice, did I? None of us do."

And that's when I break through on what it is he fears the most. He fears losing himself, fears becoming one of them completely.

His face is close to mine, so close I can see the remaining specks of blue deep beneath the pale in his eyes—the last of his humanity. "You're not what they think," he whispers, looking into my eyes like he can see my thoughts. "And one day, you're going to save everyone. Too bad I won't be here to see it." He clutches my hand and with his alarming strength forces me to plunge the knife deep into his chest. He lets out a painful scream and then thrusts me through the window. Glass splinters rip at my skin as I fall back and slam against the floor. I jump to my feet, seeking the knife. I find it a few feet away, the blade soaked with blood.

My boots crunch against broken pieces of glass as I walk to the broken window. The Higher lays on the floor, eyes open, no life, no breath, no fear. A Higher can't be killed, only by the hand of another Higher. And it was my hand that killed him.

"What did you do?" Aiden's voice rises over my shoulder.

"I didn't do it," I lie. "He did it to himself." I turn, the knife clutched in my hand. "He stabbed himself."

He eyes the knife in my hand. "We have to get out of here, now." Without warning, he snatches my hand and he fears he'll lose me. He pulls me for the back and I start to go with him, but stop.

You betrayed me," I say. "You poisoned me—let them throw me in with a vampire and a Higher."

"I didn't know about the Higher," he says. "And the vampire, well, I had to know." He tugs at my hand. "But I'll explain later. We have to go, now. Before they realize what you've done."

"I said I didn't do it." I jerk my hand away from his and cross my arms. "I don't trust you. And I'm not going with you."

"Kayla, please," he begs, not angry, but terrified. "Now's not the time. We can talk about what I did later, and you can give me the biggest lecture on how stupid I am. But after we get the hell out of here."

I point the knife at his chest, a threat. "Why shouldn't I just kill you right now and run off by myself. It seems like the safer option."

"Because you're not a killer," he says with certainty. "And because... because, God dammit, Juniper, you're so stubborn sometimes." He kicks a piece of glass and it ricochets through the air. Then he takes me by the shoulders and crushes his lips into mine. It's like I've swallowed him whole, suffocating with everything that is him. It's more than sensing his fears; it's like seeing into his soul.

When he pulls away, he's gasping, eyes glazed over, blinking wildly.

"What the hell was that?" I breathe heavily.

"A kiss." He licks his lips "And assurance that you can trust me."

"How did you know that would—"

"Later," he says and reaches for my hand. I let him take it, trusting him, and letting him lead me away.

"Do you know a way out?" I whisper as we hop over a row of tipped chairs and storm for the back wall of the room where there's a door.

He kicks the door open, splitting the wood, splinters flying. "We run and kill anyone that gets in our way."

I like his plan, until I really think about it. "Where would we even go?" I pause. "It's better for me to go on my own."

He looks me straight in the eye. "No it's not." His voice cracks. "I didn't know they were going to do that, throwing you in with a Higher just because the vampires fear you. We all have our little things. He should have been more accepting of yours."

He doesn't know what really happened and I'm afraid to tell him. I keep silent as we tiptoe through the darkness, round a corner, and step out onto wobbly platform. He puts his fingers to his lips and points down at our feet. The platform is made of linked metal thin enough to see straight into the crowded room below us. People sit at tables, eating dinner, chattering away as if nothing is wrong, as if death isn't lurking in the air.

"Is Dominic down there?" I hiss. "Please tell me he's not."

Aiden shakes his head and walks cautiously across the platform, taking each step gradually as it rocks underneath his movement. I follow, keeping my footsteps weightless and my body balanced against the sway.

"He eats his dinner in his room," he says. "But soon the guards are going to report what happened. And we need to make sure we're long gone before he does."

We gradually speed up, the floor shuddering, trails of dust trickling down on the peoples' heads below. A girl glances up, blinking against the dirt. But thankfully, she doesn't see us and returns her gaze to her food.

At the end of the platform, there's a very narrow tunnel digging into the wall. Aiden gets down on his hands and knees, puts his knife between his teeth, and crawls inside. I follow, dragging my knees through the dirt. My head scrapes the ceiling and twigs snag my hair. I try to twist free, but it's dark and I can't see. Desperate, I take my knife and hack a chunk of my hair off, freeing my head, and I keep crawling, knowing how precious my time is.

At the end of the tunnel, there's a large boulder. Aiden shoves at it, panting and grunting until finally I give him a hand. Within seconds, it's rolling forward down the hill and we're blasted by the grey of the outside world. He dives out head first, slumping onto the rocks. Then sticks his hand in and helps me climb out. We're standing in a ditch that rests between two hills.

"Where are we?" I ask as we start to climb up the side of the hill.

"An emergency escape route." His hand slips, but he promptly catches himself. "They are all over the place."

We heave onto the top of the rocky hill. Aiden's out of breath, heart knocking against his chest, while mine still stays silent.

"You know, you were always pretty good at staying calm," he pants. "But this is just ridiculous. You're not even out of breath."

I stare up at the smoky sky, not wanting to talk about me, afraid of what he'll discover. "What do we do now?"

"I don't know." He clutches his side. "I was hoping maybe you had an idea."

_"Fix the world Kayla," he says. "You're the only one who can."_

I sit up, dusting the dirt off my arms and face. "What'd you do with my stuff? My knife, the vials, the pocket watch—all the stuff that was in my jacket pocket."

His eyebrow arches. "Why?"

"Because I need it." I stand, dusting my hair and arms off. "I need the pocket watch. Where is it?"

He points over his shoulder. "Over at the hillside, in my room."

I start down the hill, but he grabs my arm. "We can't go there. That's the first place they'll look for us. We have to find somewhere else to hide out."

"We have to," I say, pausing to turn and look in his eyes. "I need that pocket watch. It's important."

He tugs me back toward him. "Why? What's so important about it?"

"Because," I say, holding back the truth like I do. "It is."

"Why," he repeats, refusing to let me go. "Or are you after something else and you just don't want to tell me?

I frown, perplexed. "What else would I want?"

He sighs. "Nothing. Look, let's just go. We can hide out in a cave until this all cools down."

I stand firm. "I'm not leaving without that watch."

He lets out a frustrated breath. "Why? What's so important about the damn watch?"

"Because it might fix the world to what it was," I shout.

Everything, including his heart, freezes.

# Chapter 24

"Fix the world back to what it was?" He asks struggling to keep up as I sprint across the desert. "What does that mean? Back to before the virus spread?"

"I'm not sure," I say. "But I need that watch."

He nods and we start running again, the sky beginning to shade over. I hold my breath as I run, hoping for darkness, hoping to buy myself some time. It continues to fade, a black blanket, the air filling up with cries. Aiden grows nervous, fearing their awakening. And I worry too, but for him. Not myself.

Finally, our feet slip in the sand as we race up the hillside and with a lot of effort, he slides the boulder over. I jump inside, looking back at the darkness, and the bodies of the vampires dotting the land as he shoves the boulder back over, sealing it all away.

"Well, at least Dominic won't come looking for me," I say. "Not until morning, anyway."

He doesn't answer, mulling over something with a great amount of heaviness.

"Which way to your room? I ask. "Right or left?"

He shakes his head. "You know, even if there's a cure, it wouldn't change things."

"Cure?" I say. "Who said anything about a cure?"

"Fixing the world." He sits down in the dirt. "That has to mean finding a cure against the vampire disease. Or eliminating all of the vampires? But even if you did, it wouldn't change anything."

"How so?" I ask. "I mean, if there is a cure, why wouldn't it save the world? All the vampires would be gone. We'd all be free."

"Free from what?" he asks. "All of the Adepti's in The Colony thinks their lives are perfect, so they wouldn't leave and the Highers would still have the control."

I can't help but think of Tristan when he says this: happy, perfect Tristan. "They don't think it's perfect," I tell him. "They're just afraid."

"No, that's not the only reason." He takes my face in his hands. "Think about it. Why would The Colony ever be built to begin with?" I start to speak, but he cuts me off. "And don't say for shelter against the vampires, because if that's true, then how did the Highers end up being the ones in charge? All they are are vampires, only better looking and smarter. But they love to kill just as much, yet everyone lets them do whatever they want, no matter who gets hurt."

I think about the Higher that I killed. "Do you know anything about experiments?"

His expression falls. "Experiments?"

"Yeah, going on inside The Colony?"

His eyebrows knit together. "I don't know, what kind of experiments are you talking about?"

"I'm not completely sure," I admit. "But perhaps something to change a Higher back into human form."

He's even more confused. "That's not possible. The Highers were never human to begin with."

"You know, a week ago I probably would have agreed with you," I say. "But now, I'm not so sure. I mean, the vampires were humans once, so why couldn't the Highers be? And besides, they had to come from somewhere."

He digs his knife in the dirt. "Everything comes from somewhere, Kayla. It doesn't mean they were created from an experiment."

"Didn't you ever ask anyone where they came from?" I ask. "I mean, you're out here, where you're supposedly free. Didn't you want to ask questions?"

He gives me a dirty look. "This place isn't like The Colony, Kayla. I don't have to ask questions, because everything is the truth." Again, he touches the white line.

I sigh, getting to my feet. "Can you just show me where my damn watch is? Please."

He jumps in front of me. "Okay, let's say I think you're right. Let's say I think someone created the Highers—that it was all done intentionally and let's say there's a cure. So what?" He takes me by the shoulder, looking me in the eyes. "You can't erase everything that's been done."

"But I can make it so the future is better," I say.

"But why does it have to be you?" His voice is soft, just a whisper, fearing I'll leave him.

"I don't know," I say. "It just seems like it's what I am supposed to do, you know?"

He shrugs. "No, I don't know. It's your choice what you do."

"And I'm choosing to try and fix it," I say. "I mean, what kind of person would I be if I just stood around, letting everything go on in the violent way that it does, if there might be a way to stop it?"

"You'd be human," he mumbles.

"What?"

He sighs, massaging the back of his neck. "Nothing. Never mind. I'll take you to your watch."

* * *

"I don't get it," I say, rubbing my finger along the back of the golden pocket watch. "I don't get how this tiny thing could possibly fix the world."

Aiden flops back on his bed and drapes his hand over his head. "I don't know either." He's been in a downer of a mood since our little conversation.

"I'm sorry," I say, scratching at the edge the watch. "About what happened?"

He peeks under his arm. "What do you mean?"

I sit down on the foot of the bed. "I'm sorry that you had to find out about Dominic trying to kill me."

He laughs. "I don't care about Dominic. I care about you running around and trying to fix the world."

I open the watch, staring at the numbers. "It just feels like it's what I'm supposed to do. I mean, they're all innocent—the Adeptis."

"And how do you know that?" He lifts his head, resting back on his elbows. "How do you know they're all innocent? Everything down there is fake."

I ignore him and focus on the watch.

He sits up and slides beside me. "I'm sorry. I'm just upset about Dominic. I thought I'd escaped all that crap when I left The Colony, but I guess not."

I nod, not pointing out that I know he's lying. Because something else is troubling him, something deeper, something about me.

"Where did you get this?" I pick up the book I saw earlier and flip through the pages. "I thought all books were destroyed when the virus spread."

"This guy, Xander, who used to live here, had it on him when he was tossed out of The Colony."

"Xander," I say, remember the name. "I've heard that name before."

"Probably from The Colony."

I shake my head. "No, I heard Greyson say something about a Xander when I was chained up—something about him turning back."

He doesn't say anything and I stare at the photos in the book, pictures of beautiful creatures feeding on humans. "They're vampires." My eyes skim the lines of the perfect figures with sharp fangs, alluring eyes, and smooth skin. "But they're beautiful, not rotting and gross like the ones we know."

He takes the book from me and turns the page. "Yeah, I guess that's what they could be."

"You never thought about it?"

He shrugs, turning the page. "I've only glanced through it a few times and yeah, thought they looked like vampires, but books were destroyed right after the virus spread, so it doesn't make sense if they were." He skims his finger across the photo. "And it doesn't make sense why they'd be so beautiful and perfect."

_"The answer to fixing the world," Monarch says, "is to find out how it all started."_

I flinch at the sound of his voice inside my head.

"What's wrong?" Aiden asks, meeting my eyes.

"Nothing," I mumble and direct my attention to the photo. "Maybe they're not vampires. But maybe this is where vampires first started."

He fiddles with the corner of a page. "I'm not sure I'm following you."

"Well, where did the vampires come from exactly?"

He looks at me like I'm a moron. "From the virus that accidently spread."

"Yeah, but what started the virus?" I ask. "And why would these photos resemble vampires if it was all accidental?"

His fingers move to a set of numbers below a photo. "1989."

I gape at him. "You know how to read?"

"Don't get too excited," he says. "I only know numbers—that's it."

"What do those numbers mean?" I ask. "1989."

"It's probably a date of when the book was made."

"Date?"

The corners of his mouth quirk up, his mood lifting. "Yeah, you know, like time."

I look down at the watch in my hand. "Time, like as in this watch."

"Kind of." He wavers. "But it measures years. Like right now we're somewhere in the year 2031, so that makes this book pretty old."

"Older than the virus."

"Much older." He nods.

I snap the pocket watch shut. "How do you know all this?"

"That guy Xander," he says. "He knew a lot of things, once his memories started opening up, like how to read numbers. He taught me a few things, but not much."

"Not enough to read these pages." I take the book from him, gazing at the photos of the vampires. "But they're so perfect, it just doesn't make any sense unless..."

He cocks an eyebrow. "Unless what?"

Something clicks in my head. "Unless this was what the virus was supposed to do?" I say. "Only maybe it didn't, at least not to everyone."

"A virus is something accidental," Aiden points out. "It's not a good thing."

"Yeah, but it could have started out as people thinking it's a good thing," I say. "I mean, a virus started as medicine and medicine is used for all kinds of things. It can save lives, heal people. Make people better—stronger. I've seen Monarch do it a ton of times. But here's the thing. Not all medicine affects everyone the same way."

He leans over my shoulder, running his finger along one of the photos. "You think the virus might have started out as a good thing, but then turned some people into vampires and some into Highers?"

In the photos, their white skin and haunting eyes strike a resemblance to a Higher. "But I've never seen the Highers feed like this," I say.

His eyes flick in my direction. "You sure about that?"

_Blood. Blood everywhere._ _Behind the blood red door._ "I'm not sure about anything anymore."

He lets out a sigh. "But if what you're saying is true, then what was the virus originally meant to do?

I shrug. "I'm not even sure I'm right. I'm just telling you what I know about medicine."

Aiden taps his finger on the book and then suddenly, he's back in the game. He jumps to his feet. "We need to go to the city."

"The city?" I look up from the book. "Why?"

"Because that's where Xander is," he explains. "He bailed out a little while ago. Before he left, he announced that he was leaving to try and find a cure. Everyone just assumed he was crazy, he'd always been a little off, but now, I'm starting to wonder if he might have known something all along."

"Why?" I say, because I can tell he's holding something back. "If you've known this all along, why believe he knows something now?"

"Because of what you said." He's cheerful, upbeat, his pulse a lively beat of colors. "And if all the Highers and vampires are part of the virus, then it can be fixed."

"But earlier you said it didn't matter if we could," I say. "That even if we changed everything back to the way it was, it wouldn't matter because everyone in The Colony thinks their lives are perfect."

"But if there's a cure for the Highers then The Colony no longer exists." He puts on a hooded black jacket and zips it up. His eyes meet mine and he walks in front of me, lifting the book from my lap, setting it aside, and pulling me to my feet. "Hey," he says. "I'm sorry for how I was acting earlier. It was just hard, you know, to find out Dominic tried to kill you just because the vampires are afraid of you. I didn't realize he was so afraid of someone being different like that. But I promise I'm on board with you now. Let's go find a cure."

"We don't even know for sure if it's a cure we're looking for," I say. "In the memory, all Monarch said was that I'd fix the world."

"It's got to be a cure," he says with determination. "All that talk about medicine, it just has to be."

I stare at him, listening to his heart, beating softly, but with excitement.

"I wish you knew how much you meant to me," he says seriously. "I wish you could remember and realize I'd never do anything to hurt you. Not intentionally, anyway."

I eye his lips, beautiful and lustrous. Then without thinking, I lean in and press mine against them. Not because I want to kiss him, but because I want to know if he speaks the truth. Like the first kiss, I can taste everything he feels and it's so intense I have to pull away. Because at one time or another, Aiden has loved me, and I know that at this moment, he'd do anything to protect me from harm.

"Let's go to the city, then," I say. "Let's go see if there's a cure."

His eyes open and he flashes me a smile. "Finally we're on the same page. And hopefully, Xander knows more than we do."

"I sure hope so." I stare at the book, at the pages that lay open. The vampire's teeth, the blood. What if this is a Higher? What if this is what I'll turn into if I can't find a way to fix it?

Aiden tosses me my jacket and a bag. "Start loading up. We have a long way to go." He starts throwing bottles of water and cans of food into a backpack.

I reach into the pocket of my jacket, feeling the vials and syringes. I take out one of the vials. "What is this?"

"You don't know?" He asks, shoving the book into his bag.

I shake my head. "Maci had them when we woke up and said an Angel told her we had to inject them into us."

"What's an Angel?" He asks.

I shrug. "I thought maybe you might know."

He shakes his head, swinging his bag over his shoulder. "I don't know what an Angel is, but I can tell you what's in that little vial. Poison. And if you inject it into you, you'll die."

"Well, where did it come from?" I ask. "I mean, who gave it to her?"

"That's the real mystery," he says. "No one knows. Everyone who's thrown out of The Gathering has them. In fact, some of them were even stupid enough to inject the medicine into them—that's how we found out it was deadly."

I drop the vial, but luckily it doesn't shatter. "But Bernard took this." I swipe the vial up. "He injected the medicine into him."

The color drains from his face. "I'm sorry, Kayla... I didn't know how to tell you."

"So he died?" I choke.

"He made it here—and we tried to help him," he says. "But he's gone now."

I chuck the vial across the room and watch it break into a hundred tiny pieces. Aiden flinches, but doesn't say anything as I grab the bag and start filling it with food and water. Even on the outside there's death.

"How high are our chances of actually finding this Xander guy? I mean, the city is huge. And dangerous."

"Honestly?" Aiden asks and nod. "The chances seem low, but trust me—I'm excellent at tracking people down. I'll find him. No matter what it takes. I swear to God we'll find him." His eyes are full of passion and determination and I like it.

# Chapter 25

We wait until right before day breaks, right before we know Dominic we'll come for me. Aiden rests while we sleep, snoring away in his bed. I remain awake, though, flipping through the pages, obsessed with what it could all mean—obsessed that I could turn into a Higher.

I have to find a way to stop it.

When Aiden wakes up, we immediately find Ryder. She's downstairs in the room with the tables and chairs, sitting by herself. Her hair is even more matted and the black stuff around her eyes is gone. After Aiden finishes explaining what's been going on and that we plan to leave, she narrows her eyes.

"I think that's a stupid idea," she says. "Going out into the city to look for Xander—who's a little crazy I might add—all because she thinks he might know a cure."

"I think he might know of a cure," Aiden points out. "I'm the one who suggested we go."

"Only because of her," she says. "And if Dominic wants her dead, I'm sure he has a good reason."

"Hey," I say at the same time Aiden says, "Knock it off, Ryder."

He steps between us, as a barrier. "What Dominic did wasn't right and you know it. It's everything we've tried to break away from." He pulls her in for a hug. "I'll come back. I promise."

She hesitates, before giving him a small hug back. "Please don't go. The city is too dangerous. If you get bit or if the wrong person spots you..."

He pulls away and adjusts the handle of the backpack. "Keep an eye on things while I'm gone. And try to keep Dominic and the others out of here."

"You know they can get in if they really want to," she says with a heavy-hearted sigh.

He nods. "But try, okay. And if they do get in, just pretend you have no idea where we are."

We turn to leave and she calls out, "Maybe Dominic's right though. I mean, it's creepy, her being able to walk with vampires. It's unnatural."

I pop my knuckles, giving Aiden an annoyed look.

"It's not creepy," Maci's voice floats up from behind us. She looks like she's just woken up, her red hair a mess of tangles, her eyes drooping with exhaustion.

I turn to Aiden. "I need to talk to Maci for just a minute, before we leave." I take Maci to the farthest corner, just out of earshot and kneel down in front of her.

"You're going somewhere," she says, her pulse a stream of exhilaration. "Somewhere important."

I'm relieved to be able to hear her pulse again, but frustrated I still can't find my own. "Can you see where I'm going?" I whisper.

She nods. "To the city—to fix the world."

"And will I?"

"I can't see that far yet." She frowns, disheartened.

"That's okay. But I need you to do a couple of things for me while I'm gone."

Her eyes light up with delight. "I will, Kayla. I promise. Just like the Angel told me to do."

"The Angel told you to listen to me?" I ask and she nods. "Okay, well that's the first thing I need you to do. I need you not to talk about Angels while I'm gone. And try to keep quiet about the things you sense are going to happen. People around here don't seem to like people who are different."

She grins. "Alright, I can do that. That's easy."

"Good." I sneak a knife from out of my pocket and press it the palm of her hand. "And promise me you'll keep this in your pocket at all times."

"I promise." She stuffs it inside her jacket. "I won't let you down Kayla. I'll keep all my promises."

I sure hope so, because they are more for her protection than for mine. I head to leave.

"And Kayla," she calls out in a small voice. I pause, turning back. She waves me in closer and lowers her voice. "You're wrong," she says. "You're not one of them."

I check over my shoulder, making sure that Aiden and Ryder aren't listening. "One of what? A Higher?"

"You're something different—something better." She says. "That's why you can fix it."

God, I hope she's right. Because the last thing I want to be is the thing I've spent my life resenting. I've always despised the Highers, at least the ones at The Colony. And if turns out I am one and there's no cure, I don't think I could live with myself.

"Keep that one to yourself too," I say my final good-bye to her.

Aiden and I slink out of the hillside, sealing it shut behind us with the boulder. We head across the desert, the sky a light grey, but I know eventually it will turn black.

"Will we make it there before dark?" I hop over a rock.

Aiden sidesteps around a cactus. "No, we'll have to travel through the night."

"But isn't it dangerous for you to be out when darkness falls? They'll leave me alone, but not you."

He tips his head down, his dark hair shielding across his eyes. "I'll be fine Juniper, don't worry about me." He kicks a rock. "You know, you're still the same as I remember. You're completely fine with being reckless with your own life, but if it's anyone else's there's no way you'll risk it."

I can't help it: I love the sound of Juniper rolling off his tongue. "Tell me how well you know me."

"You know I can't do that," he says. "I already explained to you that if I start telling you about your past, then you'll only remember it how I tell you. And you want to remember things on your own. Trust me."

_Blood. Blood everywhere._ "You know, Monarch always said that medicine is one of strongest things in the world. Stronger than the human mind. It really is amazing," I say, taking out the last black vial. "Something this small can do so much damage." I hold it between my fingers. "I mean, it was something like this that changed humans into to vampires."

He eyes the vial. "You kept that?"

I close my hand around it. "Yeah, I was thinking that it might come in handy, you know, if we run into something that needs to die." I make a stabbing gesture with my hand.

"Like what?"

"Like a vampire."

"That's what a knife's for," he says, holding up his own, which is sharp and has a red jewel embedded in the handle. "You don't even know if that stuff works on a vampire."

"Still. You never know." I put the vial in my pocket and take out Monarch's watch. "What if there is a cure—to the vampires, to the Highers. What if I can really fix the world?"

"Then we better hope it's an easy cure," he says. "Because, right now, you're the only person that vampires won't touch. And how we're going to get it to the Highers, who knows."

He's getting down again, and I don't like it. I turn the pocket watch over in my hand, the gold shimmering like fire. I run my fingers along the face of the watch. "Do you know what these numbers mean?"

He smiles, his mood suddenly uplifted again. "I do. Do you want me to try and explain it to you?"

"Yes," I say and he touches the top number with his finger.

"This is a twelve." He glides his finger down two golden lines. "When both of these point to the twelve it means it's either twelve o'clock at night or in the afternoon."

"But they always point it," I say. "They never change."

"That's because the batteries are dead." He taps the back of the watch. "If it did work, then the hands would move."

"Hands?"

He laughs and goes into this big speech about numbers and time and what they all mean. I try and pretend I understand what he's saying, but it's confusing. And I start to wonder just how long he's been out in the Old World.

I return the watch to my pocket. "So were we friends when we were young or when we were older?"

He presses his lips together, smothering a smile. It's a pause, a hint of consideration. "I've known you forever," he finally says.

Our boots crunch the sand and rocks.

"Forever can mean a lot of things."

He stops so abruptly, I end up stepping on his toes. I take a step back and he places my face in his hands.

"Since your first day in The Colony, Juniper," he says my name delicately, like he desperately wants me to remember him.

I think of my first day at The Colony, or how I remember it. A little girl in the street, walking amongst the vampires, toward a little boy.

"Oh my God," I say aloud, without meaning to.

He stares at me, his honey eyes mystified. "What is it?"

"I think I... were you the little boy in the street?"

"You remember that?" He's shocked, but thrilled. His heart stammers with elation.

"Yeah," I say. "But not just now. I've remembered it forever. Monarch use to tell me that's not how it happened though."

"That's how it happened," he assures me. "Do you remember what happened after we were saved?"

"So he saved you too?" I ask. "Well, I guess you're standing here."

He frowns. "You didn't get that far, did you?"

I shake my head, my cheeks still squeezed between his hands. "Sorry. The last thing I can remember is Monarch saving me."

He sighs and starts walking. "Do you remember anything that happened after?"

I shake my head again and the wind carries on the silence for a while.

"If you want," he finally says. "We can try the _minte_ on you when we take a break."

I trip over my own feet, an awkward movement for me. "You have a vial of it?"

He swings off his bag, unzips it, and shows me the small vial, full of clear liquid. It doesn't look like anything, yet it's everything.

"Maybe we shouldn't get into that right now." I gesture at the desert, at the rocks, at caves delving into the rocks. "Considering where we are."

"We'll make it quick." He zips up the bag and swings it back over his shoulder. "Don't you want to know what's trapped in that head of yours?"

I hesitate. "It depends."

"Hey." He stops, smoothing my hair back. "Sometimes you have to take in the good with the bad. But trust me, it's worth it."

"Okay," I say. "When we take a break, we can give it a try, I guess."

He smiles, his honey eyes lighting up, the bangs of his hair gusting in the wind. "And remember to think of me this time." He gives a pause. "But you might not want to focus on remembering the rest of that street thing just yet, if you're not ready for the bad."

We head to the right, putting the hillside so far behind us it's like it doesn't even exist. The sky grows greyer with each passing minute. The wind picks up, swirling the sand and the sage brush. A bug smacks into my lips and I spit it out, coughing and gagging.

"A bug flew in my mouth," I explain when Aiden looks at me strangely.

He drags his thumb across my bottom lip, wiping the sand away, taking in my lips with great attention.

"How did you know about the kissing thing?" I ask, tucking strands of my stray hair behind me ear.

He doesn't answer, because he can't.

"It's because you've kissed me before, isn't it." I touch my lip. "We've kissed a lot of times, haven't we?"

His eyes burn hot with desire. "You remember?"

"No. Sorry it was just a guess."

He brushes his hair out of his eyes and keeps his hand there to block away the blowing sand. "Don't worry, you will." And that's all he says.

"Can you at least explain to me what it is?" I ask. "Because when we kiss it feels like..."

"You could feel everything about me," he finishes for me. "It happens when _you_ get close to someone... really close to someone." He stuffs his hands in his pockets.

"So if I kissed someone else the same thing would happen?"

He feigns insult. "Who else are you planning on kissing?"

I smile, but a memory rushes back to me, sharp and painful, stinging my brain.

_"It's important that you practice standing alone, Kayla," Monarch tells me. "So that when the time comes, you'll be able to handle it."_

_"But sometimes it's hard. Sometimes I just want to be normal."_

_"Life is hard sometimes," Monarch replies. "But you'll do what you have to if it means fixing the world. It's what you were made for."_

"Kayla, did you hear me?" Aiden's standing in front of me. I've stopped walking and he looks concerned. "Is everything okay? Are you remembering things on your own again?"

"No," I lie, shaking the memory away.

"Maybe we should take that break now," he suggests.

I force a smile. "We've got darkness chasing after us."

"We have to make it through darkness, anyway," he says, hiking toward a cluster of red rocks. "So we might as well take a break and make sure we're all rested and reenergized."

I trudge along after him, parking my unenthusiastic body on top of a flat rock.

Aiden takes off his bag and pulls out two bottles of water, tossing one to me. "Here, drink up."

I take a sip, while he pulls a bag of funny shaped flat things that look like little pieces of bread. But when I put one in my mouth, it taste so much better than bread.

"This is good." I cover my mouth as crumbs spill out.

"You know, they really didn't feed us very well in The Colony." Aiden sips from the bottle. "That's one of the first things I noticed when I was thrown out here."

I pop another piece into my mouth. "So you really don't know what The Gathering is?" I question. "Even after all your memories resurfaced?

"All my memories haven't resurfaced yet," he says, his gaze lifting to the top of the hills. "And no, I don't know what it is, because it wasn't an erased memory—it wasn't a memory at all."

I chew slowly, confused. "I'm not sure I'm following you."

"I was unconscious." His eyes are still on the hill line, this strange look shifting into his expression. Then he jumps to his feet, tossing everything into his bag. "We need to move. Now." He hooks the bag over his shoulder and pulls me to my feet.

I glance back, at the hill. "What did you see?"

"I'm not sure," he mutters, dragging me toward a cave. "But I think we might be being followed."

"By Dominic?" I hurry with him. "Would he do that?"

"I think he might." He stops in front of the dark cave, staring down at it. "We need a place to hide."

I blink down at the cave, resting at the bottom of the rocks, one of the easier ones to get to. "They might be inside."

"I know."

"I should check first then." I start for it, but he tightens his hold on my hand. "Aiden, they won't hurt me."

He lets out a breath, nodding, and releases my hand. "But take your knife out, just in case."

I do and then walk to the edge, where the line rests between darkness and light, life and death.

# Chapter 26

Once my foot crosses the line of darkness and I enter the cave, I know there's no turning back. It seems like it has a deep back at first, but when I walk further inside, I realize that it's actually quiet shallow. I check the shadows, behind rocks, in dark corners and breathe a sigh of relief.

"You can come in," I call out to Aiden, putting my knife away.

He steps in gingerly, his heart beating fiercer the moment he crosses into the dark side. His hand rests on his pocket, trembling with the desire to draw out his knife.

"Did you see them?" I ask, sliding off my bag.

His head creases. "See who? Oh you mean Dominic. No, but I think we should hide in here for a little while to make sure." He sets his bag on the ground and sinks down. "So what'd you want to do while we wait? You want to try the _minte_."

Secretly, I think I was hoping he'd forget about that. "Sure, I guess."

"Don't assume you'll see something you fear," Aiden says, unzipping his bag. "Or else you probably will."

"I wasn't assuming anything." I sit down in front of him, crisscrossing my legs. "And I don't fear anything."

His eyes smile through his lashes. "That's not true." He pulls out a syringe and unwraps the plastic.

"It is true," I argue. "It's how I've always been."

He drives the needle into the vial. "You may not fear things like vampires—or even Highers—but you do have fear, Kayla. Like the fear that everyone will find out who you really are." He extracts the clear medicine from the lid. "You ready for this?"

I blink at him. I'm still stuck on what he's said, because it's so close to the truth. "What? Yeah, I'm ready." I stick out my arm.

But he puts his bag on his lap and gives it a pat. "You might want to lie down ... when you go under, you really go under."

I lower my head to the bag on his lap, cross my hands over my stomach and stare up at him.

He taps the needle with his finger, then whispers, "Think of me and maybe you'll remember what we were."

I nod, but shove all thoughts of him out of my head. Remembering him would be easier, I'm sure. But it won't help with getting any answers. No, if I'm going to do this, I'm going to make it worth it. And that's why, when he shoves the needle into my arm, all I hold in my mind is the bright red door.

* * *

_Blood. Dripping from the walls, raining from the ceiling. I shield my head and my ears, trying to block out the screams._

_"Help me." The voice is cracked, pained, tortured. "Help me please."_

_"Don't be afraid," Monarch says._

_I open my eyes to the sound of his voice. He's not there, but the blood has cleared away. The room is solid concrete, the only color the bright red door. Chains hang from the wall, savage and beaten. But no bodies are chained to them—not even mine._

_I stand to my feet, tipsy and nauseous, clutching a little doll. I follow the sound of the help-me cries, one foot in front of the other, heading to the only place I can, a dark hall. The lights flicker with my footsteps._

_"Help!" The voice begs. "Please."_

_The voice leads me to door, not red, but rusted metal, scratched and dented. Even though I'm nervous, and my insides scream at me not to, I turn the doorknob. Something scurries to the side and I stop short, almost pulling back._

_"No, please don't go," the voice says, tears laced in its tone. "Please don't be afraid of me."_

_I take a deep breath and step into the room. The lights blink, but in the corner I see a small figure._

_"Are you okay?" I ask, my voice very real inside my head._

_It shakes its head, its body balled into the darkness._

_"I won't hurt you." I bend down slowly, trying to see who the small child is. The light brightens, vanishing all the shadows around. The little child lifts up its head, the flesh peeling away, teeth missing except for two sharp fangs. "Help me." It reaches its fingerless hand for me, then pulls back, gnawing at its own arm._

_I trip back, bumping my elbow on the corner of a metal tray, sending tools flying and scattering to the ground in an earth quaking noise. The child screams and I turn to run, but Monarch appears in the door._

_"Kayla, what are you doing in here?" His grey eyes are troubled, his hands stained with guilt._

_"I'm sorry," my lips speak for me, words of the past. "I thought I heard..."_

_He grabs me by the arm and drags me into the hall, slamming the door and locking the child away._

_"You can't just wander around like this," he says. "You know better."_

_"I'm sorry but –"_

_"Too many questions," he mutters, pulling something out of the pocket of his white coat. "Always too many questions. It's the one thing I can't seem to fix." He holds a syringe in his hand, filled with purple liquid. "If you keep this up, we'll never be able to make it work."_

_"I'm sorry," I apologize again._

_He sighs and moves the needle for my arms. "You have to forget what you saw, otherwise it'll all be ruined."_

_I nod and he pumps my body full of medicine that steals the memory away._

_Blood. Blood everywhere. I drowned in it, screaming._

_"Help me!"_

* * *

"Help me." My body jerks awake at the sound of my voice.

Aiden's eyes are wide as he stares at me, trying to hold me into place. We both breathe in each other, rapid sounds that fill the air with tension.

"I'm guessing," he says, holding up my arm, lined, again, with red scratches and dried drops of blood. "That you didn't remember something about me."

I slowly shake my head. "No." My voice sounds strained.

He's hesitant, watching me with anxious eyes. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Again, I shake my head. Then I lie there, motionless, listening to the beating of his heart. It's like a song, a beautiful song that makes me want to close my eyes and forget what I saw. Except, when my eyelids start to shut all I can see is the red door and the tiny raggedy child curled up in front of it.

"Can we go?" I ask.

He glances over his shoulder, toward the outside. "Yeah, I think we're okay. I haven't heard or seen anything. I was probably just imaging it to begin with."

I sit up, rubbing my eyes, rubbing away the images. "How long until it gets dark?"

He stands, putting his bag across his shoulder. "I don't know. Probably like one or two..." He trails off, eyes bugging wide. "Kayla, don't move."

I freeze, hearing the movement from behind me. My breath rises and falls, in and out. My muscles tense and then I hear the cry. I relax slightly, reaching for my knife, opening my mouth to tell Aiden to run. But he's already running, but for me, not the exit.

"What are you do—"

He shoves me to the ground, whipping out his knife. The vampire stands, not too far off, fangs quivering, body trembling, eyes drowning in blood. I jump to my feet as Aiden takes a swing, but it hops back, nipping its teeth.

I draw out my knife, charging for it. But it attacks Aiden and knocks him to the ground.

I kick the vampire in the back and it tips its head, letting out a sharp cry. It snarls at Aiden, not wanting me. I grab its hair, its gooey flesh oozing between my fingers as I drag back its hostile body. Aiden scoots away, a trail of dust, and the vampire tries to run after him. I chase it, raising my knife as I ram my body into its back. We tumble to the ground and I plunge my knife deep into the middle of its back, making sure it pierces its heart, taking away its source of existence.

It crumbles to the ground and I watch as it jerks and twitches, finally deadening into nothing but a useless pile of bones.

We both breathe in relief, Aiden still on the ground, stunned to stillness.

After I collect myself, I find my voice again. "What were you thinking?" I scrape my knife on the heel of my boot, cleaning the blood away. "Going after it like that? Are you insane?"

"It was instinct." He stands to his feet, trying to seem calm, but his heart is going wild. "The first thing that ran through my mind was to save you."

"Okay, well as sweet as that is, next time, just run. It'll make it easier."

He nods, on board with this wonderful plan. "Sure. I can do that." He stares at the dead vampire bones and then his gaze moves to the outside. "We should get going. We can still cover some ground before dark."

I nod and we head out of the cave, leaving the dead vampire behind.

# Chapter 27

"So what do we do when it gets dark?" I ask.

We've been walking for a while, and the night grows richer with each step. And after what happened in the cave, I grow more uneasy. Aiden seems to lack fighting skills. And speed.

"We keep going." He points up at the tops of long line of rocks. "We're going to climb up there and walk when it gets dark."

I stare at the rocks warily. "But there are huge gaps between them."

"You can jump, can't you?" His eyebrow teases upward.

"Of course I can, but are you sure you don't just want to hide out for the night?" I ask. "I mean, after what happened in the cave... "

He speeds up, heading for the rocks. "Let's never mention that again, okay. It was a stupid thing to do, but when I saw it behind you I just panicked, completely forgetting that you can handle it on your own." He peeks over at me guilty and ashamed. "And if we walk through tonight then we should make it to the city before darkness falls tomorrow." He gives a running jump and springs himself onto the side of a large, red boulder. "And if we walk up here, we're less likely to come across vampires. They tend to stay on the ground." He lets out a gruff as he begins to climb his way up.

I glance around at the silhouette of the land, wondering how much time we have left before everything dissolves. The sky is particularly ashy today and it makes it hard to tell. Then, as if answering my thoughts, I hear a shriek ripple the sky. It's far away, but it's enough to send me running without hesitation. I'm up on the side of the rock and climbing like my life depends on it, even though it doesn't. But still, if they see me, they might start nosing around and that could lead them right to Aiden.

I beat Aiden to the top, climbing up the hill like a lizard scurries across the dessert. I stick out my hand to help him over the edge. He shakes off my offer and with effort, rolls over onto the top.

Aiden lies on his back, catching his breath.

"Are you okay?" I ask. "You seem tired.

"Yeah, I'm fine." His arms are over his head, his skin scratched and dripping in sweat. "It's just been a long couple of days, you know?"

I stare down at my arms, the lines and blood already concealed by the regrowth of my skin. And there's no sweat or signs of exhaustion.

He's up and on his feet and I can barely make out the outline of him as he takes off sprinting for the edge of the rock and springing himself across the gap, like he's proving himself to me. He lands hard, but without falling. And I forget all about his exhaustion as the last of light disappears and other vampire screams erupt across the land.

# Chapter 28

The vampires bite at the night as we leap from one rock to another. Every now again, I glance down and see the figures of their starving bodies, scrounging the land for whatever they can find that possesses any amount of blood.

"Are you sure they never climb up here?" I ask and then fling my body over a large crack between two rocks, arms out, flying like a bird.

He follows right behind me, landing only a few inches back. "Sometimes they do, but not often. There not the best of climbers, you know." He speeds up as we reach the end of the rock and flies across the gap.

"Yeah, in the city they seemed to stay on lower ground, which made them more of a pain in the ass." I follow, putting less effort into my jump, yet still going farther. "They were always in the way."

Aiden pauses to catch his breath.

"Maybe we should take a break," I suggest.

He waves me off, standing up straight. "Just keep going."

So we continue, running farther into the night as more vampires cry out. Another gap and I don't falter, soaring through the air and landing on the other side like a cat. Aiden follows, landing with a stumble and skidding onto his stomach. He curses under his breath, but jumps to his feet, shaking it off. The more jumps we make, the more his movements lag, like he's draining of energy, but won't admit it.

"Are you sure you don't want to rest for the night?" I fake a panting breath. "I'm starting to get a little tired."

He pauses, his hand grasping his side. "Let's go a little further, and then take a break." He sounds relieved.

I nod and launch myself into the night, flinging my body over the next gap, not realizing how wide it is until I'm halfway over. I land, tripping a little, but saving myself from a fall. I turn quickly, starting to shout at Aiden to stop, but he's already airborne, arms flinging. I hold my breath as he lands, but he catches his boot on a rock and stumbles forward. His feet rip out from under him and I watch as he falls off the edge and vanishes into the night.

"Aiden," I whisper, running to the ledge. "Aiden can you hear me?" The only answer I get is a herd of vampire shrieks, reverberating up the cliffs wall. I lie down on my stomach and peek over cautiously, hoping I don't lead them to us. "Aiden," My voice is soft, guarded. My stomach rolls as a crackle echoes from the land below. My hands grip tightly around the trim of the rock as I pull myself farther over, searching, hoping. "Aiden, please be alive."

"Kayla." The sound of his voice is a blanket of relief and my body trembles in a way I've never felt before. "I'm okay, just try and keep it down."

A long pause and the sound of the vampires' shrieks is maddening, almost driving me to the point that I fling myself over the edge, ready to take them all on and see if I can make them scurry.

But instead I whisper, "Can you get back up?"

Moments tick by.

"I think I'm stuck," he finally hisses. "I caught on to the side of the rock before I hit the ground, but my foot is wedged between two rocks and it's not budging."

I squint through the dark. "I can't see you. How far down are you?"

"Not too far, I don't think" he says, keeping his voice quiet. "Look to your left a little."

I follow his instruction and spot him, not too far below, just like he said. But it's too dark to see the situation he's in, just how badly he's stuck. I shuck off my jacket and bag, so it won't make noise when I move. Then I scoot my feet over the edge, turn, and back down, praying that the vampires don't spot me—or worse, spot him. Gradually, I maneuver my way down to him. Instantly, I realize that he's in a much worse situation than he let on. He's dangling upside down, blood rushing to his head, stealing circulation from his legs. The only thing that's keeping him from nose-diving to the ground—to the vampires—is his leg, which is wedged awkwardly between a fracture in the rock.

"Can you get yourself turned upward?" I ask, bracing myself on the rock beside him.

He tries to lift himself up and moans in pain. "I think my leg might be broken."

I shift my weight silently. "Broken?"

"Yeah, bones broken," he moans. "Never mind. I'll explain later. Just help me get my leg unstuck."

I scale up above him, positioning myself so that I can gently grab hold of his leg without falling to the ground. Warm liquid seeps through my fingers and drips down the back of my hand. "Are you bleeding?"

He responds with a groan.

"Why isn't it healing?" I wonder.

He only groans again and I rush to free his leg, knowing if the vampires smell the blood, they'll turn him into one of them. And even _I_ won't be able to stop them all.

"Okay, grab onto something," I instruct, one hand on his bleeding leg, the other securing me from falling.

Rocks tumble to the ground. "There's nothing to hold onto."

I extend my leg down to him. "Okay, so hold onto my leg."

"Are you crazy?" He says. "I'll yank you down with me."

"You're underestimating my strength," I say, hoping I'm not overestimating it.

A pause, then he gently takes my leg, his weak pulse beating through his fingertips. I inch my hand under his injured leg and carefully give it a soft tug. He yells out in pain and the sound carries for miles. This time I'm not as gentle. I yank on it and when it slips loose, the weight of him jolts me down. I clamber to snag my fingers onto the rock, my hands getting scraped raw as we tumble toward the ground.

Just before we hit bottom, I manage to hitch my fingers onto a rough ledge. The force of the stop almost tears my body in half, my bones snapping, my muscles stretching. But I pull through, thrusting myself onto the ledge with every ounce of my strength, dragging Aiden up with me. He rolls onto his back, groaning.

"Are you okay?" I whisper, rushing to his side.

"I'm fine." He turns onto his stomach and glances over the ledge. "I think we're fine."

He's lying. I lie down, staring up at the cliff, wondering how in the world I'm going to get him back up to the top. He crawls over to me and lies breathlessly beside me, so we're head to head, arm to arm, leg to leg. I don't ask him what he saw over the ledge or what we should do. Because I know all we can do is wait until morning.

And hope none of them smell the blood before then.

* * *

I'm still awake when the sky starts to shift from black to gray and then vampires start to flee for the caves, out of sight, out of mind, at least for now. The ash and smoke is growing thicker and seems to be traveling from the direction we're heading, so that means the city has to be getting closer. Aiden's fast asleep, curled up, his head resting on my lap. He's not afraid of dying, but afraid I'm already dead. But his fear is twisted because his heart rate is steadily decreasing with every passing minute and his leg is bleeding, his skin turning a ghastly shade of white. I've been watching him for a while, waiting for the wound to heal. Whenever someone is hurt, they heal within a few minutes. So why isn't he healing? I think about how exhausted he was while we were running and worry there might be something wrong with him.

"Aiden." I give him a soft shake. "Can you hear me? Are you awake?"

His eyelids flutter open, honey eyes glossed with pain, lips dry and cracked, voice nothing but air.

"Why aren't you healing?" I ask. "Your leg—it's still bleeding."

His eyes roll shut and he wraps his arms around him. "Because I'm human," he mutters.

"Everyone's human." I trace my fingers along the rim of his wound. "And we're supposed to heal on our own."

"Not always." He lets out a sigh. "The only reason I ever did before was because of The Colony... they pump us up with a bunch of this medicine crap that accelerates the healing process."

"I don't remember this," I tell him, brushing back his hair from his forehead. His skin's beading with sweat and I wonder if the pain is making him delusional.

"It was done daily," he answers, squirming and wincing. "At least to anyone who was a Bellator."

My daily injection. "I thought that was only done to me—and that I'd die without it."

"You might have," he murmurs. "If you'd gotten hurt bad enough." Then he stills, soft breathing as his heart fails.

I think about my shots. Every day Monarch would give them to me, saying it was saving my life. Which it was, I guess, but then why did he stop? Why did he skip the shot right before The Gathering?

I glance down at my arm, blood pumping strong, skin free of cuts even after the horrific fall. Medicine remains in the bloodstream for a certain amount of time, but is my blood still concentrated enough to save Aiden? Probably not, but I have to try.

I adjust my weight, carefully sliding Aiden's head off my lap and onto the ground. He winces from the firmness but doesn't' wake. I wipe my hands on my torn jeans and start up the rock, my body waking up the higher I climb.

When I reach the top, I grab my jacket and backpack and quickly put them on. Then I scrabble back down to Aiden. He doesn't stir when I kneel beside his head, but his heart still thrums, so I have some time. Removing a syringe from the bag and crossing my fingers that this will work, I bite the lid of the needle off and stab it into my forearm. Once it's full of my blood, I pull out the needle and watch my skin stitch itself up. This boosts my hopes that it'll work. I move the knife to Aiden's leg and inject it right above his wound. Then I wait for my blood to pump through his blood, hoping it works, but not expecting—I never expect anything. Slowly, but surely, the bloody hole on his leg starts to shrink as the skin cells and muscles rebuild and reconnect. Once the skin has sewn back together, the rhythm of his heart becomes sturdier—stronger. His eyes open and I know that he's going to be all right.

I breathe relief, relaxing back and letting him sit up.

He stares through the slash in his jeans, at his skin, where the wound has healed, but the stain of blood still remains. "What'd you do to me?" He says it like he's angry and I don't understand.

"My blood was still carrying the healing medicine, so I injected some of it into you," I explain. "But why do you sound upset."

He shakes his head and touches the tip of his finger to the bottom of his eye, running it down his cheek.

"Where'd it go?" I ask, noticing the white line's missing—his freedom.

He doesn't answer, getting to his feet and stretching out his legs and arms. "We should get going. If we hurry, we may still be able to reach the outskirts of the city before nightfall." And without saying anything else, he starts down the rock.

It's not that far of a fall, so I opt to jump and wait for him at the bottom. Then we set across the desert, the soft breeze blowing around as neither one of us utters a word. I don't mind the silence, but the fear lashing off of him eats away at me. He's afraid of turning into me. I don't understand.

"Are you mad at me?" I ask. "For saving you?"

He gives me a confounding look. "Why would I be mad at you for saving me?"

"I don't know," I say. "That's why I'm asking you."

He sighs, kicking at the rocks. "You're misinterpreting my fear, Juniper. I'm not afraid of turning out like you. I'm afraid of turning back into one of them."

"One of who?"

"A Bellator," he says. "It took forever for all that medicine to clear out of my system, so I could be free and human again."

"I'm human," I say. When he doesn't say anything, I continue, "I'm human, just as much as you are." I pause. "You should have told me about the healing thing before. Why didn't you?"

"For the same reason you don't share everything with me," he challenges. "Tell me Kayla, what did you see in the memories—what had you so afraid?"

I blink the red away. "Nothing I want to talk about."

"Why?' He asks a simple question and yet I can't answer. "Because you're afraid of it?"

"No, because I just can't." The truth is, I'm not really sure what's stopping me: my initial reaction to lie and keep things to myself or that the fact that what I saw _does_ scare me.

He scratches at his eye, where the white line used to be.

"What was it?" I reach out, letting my fingers brush his cheek.

His heart rushes with my touch. "It's what happens when you're not doped up on medicine... and it's also called as a scar. It's what's left over when a deep injury has to heal on its own. And I liked it there. It reminded me of how fake my life used to be, when I was controlled by the Highers. And how I never want to go back to that again."

I tug my hand away and fold my arms, shivering at the reminder of what Dominic thought I was. And what if it turns out that I am—the thing that he and I hate the most?

Then what?

# Chapter 29

When the twisted metal buildings of the city finally peak over the horizon, I feel a small weight lifted from my shoulders. Judging from the distance, we should be able to make it there before darkness completely sets in. The smoke rises, twisting up to the sky and polluting the air with ash and debris.

"Should we run the rest of the way?" Aiden asks.

I eye his leg, jeans torn, but the skin as smooth as porcelain. "Do you think you can?"

"I'm fine," he assures, tightening the straps of his bag. "Your blood healed me. I'm good."

So we run, racing through the sage and cacti, the city getting closer. I keep my pace sluggish, so he doesn't have to fight to keep up with me, but a part of me wants to take off, run away from everything, if only for a moment.

"Don't hold back on my account." He winks at me and then speeds up, pulling ahead.

I smile and let go, feeling weightless as I leave him in a trail of dust, boots hammering, breath free. But then I hear something that sends me to a crashing stop.

"What's the matter?" Aiden says as he collides into me.

I brace us from falling and I put a finger to my lips, shushing him. My eyes scan the rocks, which we left a ways back, but other than that there's no place to hide.

"I thought I heard—"

_Thump, thump. Thump, thump._

"Someone's here," I whisper, edging my knife out of my pocket as I circle around. Aiden follows my lead, taking out his knife out too. We glance at the hills, the rocks, the brush, the sky. But the thumping stops just as quick as it began. I turn to Aiden. "It's gone."

"What is?" He lifts an eyebrow inquisitively. "The heart beat?"

My lips do a double-take. "You heard it too?"

"No..." he says, his voice deciding. "But you've told me about it."

"No I haven't. I've never told anyone about it."

"You've told one person," he says, pointing at his chest. "You just can't remember."

I put my knife away, beginning to question why I can't remember a single thing about him. It's not like my memories are completely gone, so why is he missing from all of them.

"Well, whatever it was—heartbeat or not—it's gone." I start walking, but keep my ears on alert. "Do you think it could be Dominic?"

He shrugs, distracted. "Maybe, I don't know, though. Most, including Dominic won't go near the city."

"Because of the vampires? Or because it's so close to The Colony?"

"Both."

He remains distracted for the rest of the walk, eyebrows constantly furrowed, as if something perplexes him deeply. The only thing I can tap into is he's afraid I might die, that's it, the same fear over and over again.

Behind us, the land is relatively exposed, giving a clear view that no one seems to be following us. When we reach the city border, the dangers of what could be following us is mild. With many places to hide and The Colony resting below it all, the city is a dangerous place.

"Please tell me you have an idea of where Xander is," I say.

He shakes his head, eyes locked on the wreckage road in front of us. "But I told you I'm an excellent tracker."

"Okay, excellent tracker," I eyeball the many differently shaped buildings, "Where do we start?"

His eyes skim the lines of the buildings, the curves of the streets, and he points to our left. "This way."

Stepping foot onto the city grounds feels like I'm stepping onto Higher grounds. Being a Bellator, I know how things work. If I had been out on a raid, and stumbled across two humans, I know the rule would be to bring them in. I'm not sure if I would have, being a rule questioner and all, but I know other Bellators might have. I think if it came down to it, and we ended up crossing paths with them, I could probably get away. But Aiden, I'm not so sure.

Fires crackle from the barrels, pouring out smoke and ash into the streets and sky. The air is deadly silent, but it will all change once night arrives.

"How can he just live out here?" I whisper. "All by himself. And without anyone knowing?"

"Because he hides," he says simply. "Just like we all do."

Asphalt crumbles under my boots. "I wonder how it all came to be. You know, how everyone ended up down there and the vamps out here? I mean, I know it was a virus, but why didn't we try to fight or stop it."

"You want to know my theory?" He asks, squeezing between two cars.

I maneuver between the cars, spotting a shiny ornament hanging from the mirror of the inside. It sparkles, even without light, and I'm mesmerized.

"I think everyone ended up in The Colony because people were afraid," he continues, not noticing I've stopped. "I think it all terrified them so bad that they were willing to turn over their freedom just to live."

I snatch the shining object from the mirror and catch up with him. "Yeah, but if the Highers were part of the virus, then how did they end up with control over The Colony."

Aiden stares at the shiny thing in my hand. "What is that?"

"I don't know," I say, holding it up, watching it spin and sparkle. "But it's so shiny and... not dark." Our eyes move to the sky, dark with smoke and ash. "I wonder if it's what the sun looked like," I mumble.

I go to put the sparkly necklace back and catch sight of a pile of bones on the seat—human bones.

"I hate seeing that." I set the necklace down on top of them.

"I think I would have rather died than been infected." Aiden stares over my shoulders at the bones.

"Me too."

We continue on with our journey, passing by building after building with no sign of life.

"Maybe I should start checking inside them," I suggest after a while.

He considers this, eyes locked on a large triangular building stacked of fractured glass. "It seems kind of dangerous. You know that's where they hide out during the day."

"That's why _I'll_ go in." I step for the building, but he pulls me back. "We're never going to find him if we just wander up and down the streets."

"I told you I can track him down," he says. "It's just going to take some time."

"By time also means giving people time to find us," I say. "And darkness is coming quick, so we're running out of time." I go to move again, but he draws me back. "Aiden, this is getting us nowhere."

He opens his mouth to speak, but then snaps it shut, dropping his hold on me as he pulls out his knife. "We're being tracked."

My ears instantly perk. "I don't hear anyone."

His breathing is loud and erratic and I notice how unsteady his hands are. "That's because they don't have a heartbeat."

Before I can respond, he's running up the street, staying in the shadows that the buildings make. I chase after him, drawing out my knife.

"No vampires are out yet," I hiss. "Whoever it is has to have a heartbeat." _Unless they're me._

"No." He shakes his head, peering into a store filled with shredded t-shirts and hats. "That's not true."

We pause at the edge of a street, our backs pressed against the brick walls of a building. Aiden's heart is an anxious mess as he peeks around the corner, out into the next street. His head snaps back hastily and I lean over, wanting to see what he saw, but he elbows me back.

"Kayla, I haven't been completely honest with you," he whispers, his hand on my chest, holding me in place.

My protective instincts kick into gear and without even thinking, I slide to the side and jump in front of him, putting my knife to his throat and backing him to the wall.

"What are you doing?" His words rush out, panicked.

"Protecting myself," I say steadily. "The last time you weren't completely honest with me, I almost wound up dead."

"No, it's not like that." He moves as far away from my knife as he can with his hands up in front of him. "This was to protect you, not hurt you. I swear." He holds up his hands and carries my gaze, frantic for me to believe him.

I lower my knife, but don't put it away. "Start talking."

He nods. "Okay, but first we need to get off the streets."

I glance through the smashed glass window behind us and then stick my head inside. Chairs are knocked upside down, tables turned over, crushed glass piles the floor. I step through the crunching glass and do a quick hunt for any signs this place might be a nesting area for vampires.

I stick my head out. "All clear."

He hops through the broken window and hauls a table over to it. He flips it up on its side and shoves it against the window, locking away the outside. I latch the front door locked and as an extra precaution, prop a chair against the door knob.

He lets out a tired breath, sweat dripping from his brow as he turns a chair over and sinks down in it. "I'm really sorry." He pants. "But this one I kept from you for your own good to protect you."

I flip my knife in my hand, letting him know I still have it out. "Protect me from what?"

"From yourself." He rests his head back, staring up at the cracks in the ceiling. "If you found out, I knew you'd freak."

"I don't freak about anything." I move in front of him and dip the blade of my knife for his throat. "I thought you knew me."

"I do know you," he says. "Better than anyone. And that's why I know that this is going to be the thing that pushes you over the edge."

I cross my arms and stare him down. "Try me and let's see if you're right."

He raises his head, reaching for a chair, and drags it beside him. "Sit down." He pats the seat and I sit, laying my knife of my lap, just in case.

"You know how some call the vampires the living dead?"

"People call them that," I say. "Because that's what they are. The virus killed them, took away their pulse, their breath, yet they still walk."

He drops his head in his hands. "Right, but they're not the only ones walking around without a pulse."

Does he know about me? "What'd you mean?"

He raises his head. "I'm talking about the things that are between human and vampire, ones that aren't quite dead but aren't quite alive."

"I've never heard of anything like that," I say, the silence of my own body almost maddening.

"That's because they're not that common."

I shake my head. "I think they might be more common than you think."

He cocks an eyebrow. "Have you seen one before?"

"No," I say. "But I think I might be one."

# Chapter 30

I become painfully aware of what I am. Ever since I've left The Colony, my heart has been as soundless as the vampires.

"You're not one of them, at least not the ones I'm talking about." He turns in his chair so he's facing me. "All Bellators are kind of like them when they're first thrown out. We're technically dead when we wake up from The Gathering, just like the vampires. But eventually your heart starts beating again, after time."

I think of Maci and how her heart was fully alive again, right before we left. "How long does it take for, you know, the heart to start beating again?"

"Yours will," he assures me, like he knows it hasn't. "Just give it some time—some are just a little bit slower than others."

That's ironic, considering how fast I am. But I nod. "Why didn't you just say this in the first place? I've been worried about it."

He takes a deep breath, struggling for words. "There's more to it than just the heart restarting. Once you start returning to your normal self, you lose things like your strength and speed, your fighting skills."

Every part of my body feels like it's sinking. "So I'll become weak, and eventually I won't be able to fight anymore."

"You'll be able to fight," he mutters quietly. "You just won't be as strong."

"So I'll lose my strength." I stare at the ground, eyes wide. "I'll lose everything."

"It's not as bad as it seems," he says, taking my hands. "Eventually, you'll get used to it. In fact, you might even prefer it." He lets go of my hands and stands. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But I know you enough to know you'd take it hard. I mean, you were always so into the fighting thing, you know. More than any other Bellator."

"Is that why the vampires are afraid me?" I ask. "Will that change when my heart starts again?"

"No. That I was honest about. No one, at least as far as I know, has ever walked with them like you do." He pauses. "Kayla, I think we should keep that a secret. I mean, you saw how Dominic reacted to it—he tried to kill you over it."

No he didn't. He tried to kill me because, for some reason, he thinks I'm a Higher. That's what I should have said at the moment; I should have put it out there and gotten the worry off my chest. But all I do is nod, locking the secret deeper away.

"We need to get out of here." Aiden changes the subject as he peers over the table through a crack, staring out into the street. "I think whoever's tracking us is gone, for now anyway."

"You never said who's tracking us." I move to the side of him and peer out. "Or do you even know?"

He pauses, like he was hoping I'd forget. "The ones who decided not to let their hearts start beating again.

My mind frazzles. "That just goes against everything you just told me."

"No it doesn't." He backs away from the window. "Your heart will start beating again. These guys, they just chose not to."

"How? How do they keep it from starting?"

"I have no idea," he says, but I'm sure he's lying because the inside of him is a nervous wreck. "What I do know though, is you wouldn't want to be like them."

My eyes narrow. "Like who?"

"Hopefully, you won't have to find out."

He doesn't say anything else and I consider throwing him down and threatening him until he spills whatever it is he's withholding, but the winking of darkness warns us that it's time.

"Where are we going to hide for the night?" I ask. "In here?"

He darts off for the back of the store, which is a torn up kitchen with shelves that hang crookedly across the faded walls and pots rusting away on the chipped tile floor. He rummages through the cupboards and drawers, tossing out whatever he comes across.

I lean against the doorway, watching him. "So we're just staying here for the night," I assume.

He pulls out a can of food and shakes it. "It's as good a place as any."

I glance around the deserted store, which is similar to every other vacant store in the city. "I guess so... but I think it might be better if we go up higher. Like maybe the roof."

"No." He bangs around in the bottom cupboards, knocking around pots and pans. "The vampires might not go looking for us up there, but _they_ will."

"They as in the ones without the heart beat," I say. "The ones like me."

"They're not like you." He snaps a cupboard shut. "Your heart will beat again. I know it will."

I squat down beside him. "What are they like? These half-vampire, half-human's? Do they have a name? Do they drink blood? What makes them so frightening?"

"They're killers, Kayla. That's all that's important." He stares at a can, his eyes burning intensely. "They've killed some of The Gathering members before." His heart knocks against his chest and his hands shake, upset.

"Did they kill someone you know?" I soften my voice.

He blinks the pain away and stands, moving to a row of drawers.

I stand, setting my knife on the counter. "What are you looking for?"

His eyes light up as his hand reaches inside an open drawer. "For these." He holds up a box of matches and shakes them.

"Are you planning on starting a fire? Because the streets have plenty of them I'm sure you could borrow."

He shakes his head and puts the matches into his pocket. "No, I'm going to cook us dinner," he says, already heading into the other room.

Picking up my knife, I follow him, taking my time, deciding how long I'm going to let this secret keep going on. Aiden is setting up a few chairs, like we're formally dining. Then he heats up two cans of food over a small flame in the middle of the floor where he builds a small fire. When he's done, he hands me a can and starts eating out of the other, scooping the food out with his hands.

"So how long until you forgive me?" he asks and scoops out a bite of food.

I take a small bite of my food, which tastes more awful than anything I've ever tasted. "Forgive you for what?"

He chews on his food. "For lying to you."

"I already have." I smile, a big plastic smile, just like I used to do all the time.

He sets his can on the floor. "No, you haven't." He scoots closer and looks me in the eye. "I really am sorry, Juniper."

God, I wish he'd stop calling me that. Something about the way he says it sparkles in my mind and makes it hard to stay angry. I gently rub my finger across where his scar used to be. "I'm sorry I made it go away. I know it meant a lot to you."

He leans his head against my hand, fearing that I'll move it, fearing that I won't forgive him, fearing that I'll find out whatever it is he's still keeping locked away.

I take a deep breath, knowing how wrong it is, but needing to know. My lips move for his. He freezes as I catch him off guard. Then he meets me the rest of the way, pressing his lips to mine.

He lets out a moan as our lips melt together, soft and sweet, wanting me so bad he can't stand it. And I gasp. But not because of the kiss. I gasp because I got exactly what I was seeking.

The truth—what he's hiding.

I pull away, leaving his lips bare in the air. I jump to my feet and unzip my bag. I pull out the last vial.

I hold it up. "So this can stop it? This can stop me from losing all my strength, my speed, all of who I am?"

He jumps to his feet, knocking over the cans of food. "Why would you want to stop it, Kayla? It isn't right."

"Why do you keep lying to me?" I snap. "It's getting ridiculous." But really, I'm not any better.

"Because I want you to be human," he says, his voice begging me to understand—to not be angry with him. "You take that medicine and you'll turn into one of them—a killer."

"You mean those half-vampires, half-humans you were talking about." I eye the bubbling liquid in the vial. "That's what this will make me?"

"Yeah, that's the price you have to pay to keep it all," he spats with anger. "Trade in your life, for something in between."

"You should have told me," I say. "Whether you liked it or not, it's my choice."

"I couldn't take away your freedom like that."

"That's exactly what you're doing." My voice is calm, my senses connected to the vial. "By lying and not letting me choose what I want to do. You know, you sit here and preach about freedom, yet you've taken away mine."

"Because you don't want to be like them." He's yelling in my face and I worry that the vampires might hear him. "I know you don't. You're too good for that."

"Keep your voice down," I hiss. "And you don't know what I want."

"Yes I do." His voice is as light as a feather, his eyes pleading to be right. "You and I were in love once. Before I was chosen for The Gathering."

We breathe heavily, so close our bodies almost touch. He wants me to say something, but I can't. Because this memory he speaks of, I can't recollect.

"We should probably keep it down," I say, clutching my hand around the vial. "They might hear us."

His gaze is so intense I want to hide under a table. "That's all you have to say?"

The expression on his face reminds me of what Tristan looked like when he asked me to be his forever. "That's all I can say." My voice is barely heard over the cries of the vampire's right outside.

He nods and turns away, walking to the kitchen. I hesitate, and then follow him, taking his arm as he reaches for the back door.

"Stop," I say. "You can't go out. Listen to the cries—darkness has already fallen."

His muscles tense under my touch and his heart skips. "You want to know why you shouldn't take the medicine. Why I think it's so horrible?"

I eye the back door, scratched with the remains of a vampire passing through. "Yeah, but I—"

"Then I'll show you." He unlocks the door and cautiously cracks it open. He takes a deep breath and sticks his head out. Then he opens the door and steps out into the night.

"Are you insane?" I grab the bottom of his shirt and pull him back inside. "You can't go out there."

"You sound afraid, Juniper," he says with a twinkle in his eye. "I thought you said you were never afraid."

I let go of his shirt. "I'm not afraid for me. I'm afraid for you."

"I'll be fine," he insists. "We're not going that far."

I shake my head as he tiptoes down the alley, blending in with night. Keeping my footsteps light, I tail after him. I hold out my knife as we near the end of the building. Aiden closes his eyes, his back to the wall, as he counts under his breath.

"Go ahead," he whispers, nodding his head. "See what you have to sacrifice to keep your amazing fighting skills."

Something inside my chest squeezes as I lean forward and peek into the street. The fires lighting up the night burn fiercely. Vampires roam the sidewalks, scrounging through dumpsters, cars, buildings, hunting for blood.

I turn back. "All I see are vampires."

"Then look closer," he whispers nervously glancing down the alley.

I take a deep breath and look back out. Vampires. Everywhere. Shrieking and biting at each other. Their eyes bleed, lifeless corpses of flesh, so desperate for hunger that they'll sometimes feed off themselves. I think I'm starting to get his point.

"We can go back," I say and he nods, darting for the back door.

"So I'd be like the vampires?" I ask. "That's the price I have to pay."

"You wouldn't look like one." He locks the back door, checking it twice. "But you'd be like them, always looking for the next kill. And you don't have to pay the price," he says. "You can choose to just be you."

_"It's time for you to just be Kayla."_ One of Monarch's last words before he died.

"So Bernard's one of them now?" I ask. "Or were you lying about that too."

"No, he took the medicine." His voice is venomous. "He made the choice."

"But he didn't know what he was doing," I say. "We should have tried to help him."

"We did," he says. "Where do you think those scratch marks came form on the hillside."

"He's there," I say, relieved.

"Was there." Aiden leans against the door. "We had to turn him loose."

I shake my head. "So he's dead."

"It depends," he replies, standing up straight. "If the others found him," he pauses, "It had to be done—he would have hurt someone, Kayla." He takes my arm, but I shrug it off.

"Does The Colony know about all this?" I ask. "About these half breeds?"

He shakes his head. "I think that everyone just assumes we're all dead."

"Even the Highers?"

"Especially the Highers." He motions for me to follow him back to our pathetic little fire where we sit down on the rotted floorboards. "I think the Highers want us all dead for some reason—that's why we end up in body bags," he says. "I think that that's what's really supposed to happen at The Gathering. Were supposed to be killed, thrown into body bags, and tossed into the infirmary."

"Then why doesn't it happen?" I ask, thinking of how Maci spoke of Angels. "Do you think someone's intervening?"

He nods, the fire glowing against his honey eyes. "I think someone makes it look like we've died, so they can toss us in the desert and we can be on our way to go on living how we want."

"Maci said something about seeing an Angel," I say. "She said it was what gave her the vials." A pause. "Do you know what or who it is?"

"I already told you I didn't."

I eye him over. "I was just double-checking."

He sighs, reaching for his bag. "Well, I really don't know."

"She also said the Angel helped Taggart," I say. "Do you think he has something to doing with it? My last day he was freaking out because I didn't stay locked up in the hospital."

"Taggart?" Aiden questions "You think Taggart could be the one making us all look like we're dead?"

"He could be the one taking us out into the desert, though," I say. "But I'm not sure he knows enough about death to make us look like we're dead." There's only one person in The Colony who I know who could do something like that. "I'd say it was Monarch, but he was... He died right before The Gathering."

He props his back pack against the wall and leans back. "Are you sure about that? Because if he is the one who was making us look dead, then maybe he did it to himself."

I don't answer, remember all the feelings I felt when I found out he was dead. But it was never really said if he was. Yes, Gabrielle implied it, but I never actually saw any proof. Why hadn't I gotten proof, instead of just accepting?

"What would you do," I say. "If I did turn into one of those half-breeds? If I chose to die? Would you hate me?"

"You won't," he says with confidence. "I know you and I know you wouldn't choose to be like them."

"But what if I didn't have a choice?" I'm not really talking about the half-breeds anymore, but about a Higher. "What if I turned into something horrible and I couldn't help it? Would you hate me then?"

"As long as you don't put the medicine into you, you'll be fine." He puts his arms behind his head and rests back against his bag. "We should try to get some rest. Do you want me to take first watch?"

"No, I got it," I say, stirring the fire with the tip of my knife.

He yawns. "Are you sure? Because I can—"

"I'm fine," I assure him. "I'm not even tired."

It doesn't take him long to doze off and I relax against the wall, letting the vampire screams drown out my thoughts.

# Chapter 31

I don't fall asleep. I stay up all night listening to the sounds of screams. At one point, I take the vial and stare at the black liquid, bubbling inside the glass. The only person I know of who could create such a medicine is Monarch. He had to be the one who gave them to The Gathering members—he just had to be. Maybe he did fake his own death for some reason. But then where is he now?

When Aiden starts to stir, I quickly shove the vial back into the bag.

He sits up, his eyes blurred over with early morning confusion. He stretches his legs, pops his neck, and glances around. "You let me sleep the whole night?" He yawns.

"I wasn't tired." I stand up and stretch. "Besides, it kept pretty quiet all night," I lie.

He stands and kicks out his legs. "You know I can tell when you're lying."

"No, you can't," I argue. "And I'm not lying."

"Yeah, I can." He pauses, considering carefully. "You used to tell me things that didn't seem correct and after a while, I started to think you were a liar. So I began paying attention when you spoke to me—the little things you would do. And I noticed sometimes you scratch at your wrist. It took me a while, but I realized it's like a nervous itch or something, when you're not telling the truth."

"I don't do that." I drop my hands to my side. "And I'm never nervous."

His eyes sparkle as he balls his jacket up and stuffs it inside his backpack. "Is that so?"

"Yes." I self-consciously tug the sleeves of my shirt over my wrists. "I can promise you I've never been nervous."

"But you can't promise me you've never lied before." He swings his bag over his shoulder.

"You've lied too." I pick up my bag and secure it on my back. "So don't stand there and be all self-righteous."

"I'm not." He walks over, reaches around me, and grabs the straps of my backpack. "I'm trying to make a point." He clips the straps together.

"And what point is that?" I adjust the bag so it's comfortable.

"That we've lied to each other." He steps back, dark bangs falling across his forehead. "And I think we should just forgive each other right now and move on. No more lies. Only the truth from now." He sticks out his hand to shake on it.

I feel like I'm five years-old as I take his hand. "This is kind of ridiculous, don't you think?"

"I promise to tell the truth from now on," he says, discounting my remark.

We shake hands and he waits for me to say it back.

"I promise too," I say, but like usual, my words are fake and I know it. Because there's so much I still haven't told him, and I don't plan on telling him any time soon.

He seems satisfied, though, and we drop hands. Then we sneak out the back door and step onto the ashen streets of the city.

"So these half-breeds or whatever you call them," I say. "Can they only come out at night?"

"I try to not call them anything." He starts down the road. "However, they like to call themselves the Day Takers."

My eyes examine the windows and doors of the buildings as we pass them. "So they can come out during day."

"No," he says "They can come out in the shadows of the day." He gazes up at the smoky sky, spreading his arms out to the side of him. "But standing out here... they'd burn alive, just like the vamps would."

"Well, then their nickname is a little misleading," I say, gaze lifting to the roofs.

He hooks his hands on the straps of his backpack. "You have to think of them as everything that's in between. They can walk in the shadows of day, they thirst for blood, but don't frenzy for it."

_Blood. Blood everywhere._ My mind flashes back to the red door, where the broken child sits in the corner feeding off his own arm.

"Do they ever eat themselves?" I ask, sidestepping a pothole.

He shoots me a disgusted look. "Eat themselves?"

"Yeah, like the vampires do."

"No, they're more human than that." He pauses, gaze finding mine. "Why?"

I bite at my lip, my eyes seeing red everywhere I look. "Do you remember a red door in The Colony?" As soon as I say it, I want to take it back—it feels forbidden somehow.

He gradually slows, like all the energy is draining from his body. "That's what you saw when you took the _minte_? You saw what was behind the door?"

Slowly, I nod. "I saw a child. He was all torn up, like he was part vampire or something."

Aiden faces me and all the color has drained from his skin. "And what else?"

"Monarch caught me snooping," I say. "And so he erased it from my mind."

"And that's all you remember?"

"So far, yes."

He scratches at his wrist, tugging the sleeve of his shirt down. "That place," he says, "is something you might not want to remember."

"Did Monarch..." I swallow hard, thinking of how Dominic and Gabrielle spoke of experiments. "Did Monarch do that to that child?"

He turns his back on me and makes a right onto a wider road, packed with more cars. The buildings also stretch higher to the sky, obstructing more light.

"Don't start judging things," he says, "until you remember everything. Some of the things might be bad, but some are good."

I don't say anything, worried about what could be locked up inside my head.

"Did you hear that?" Aiden suddenly stops, his eyebrows dipping together. He glances up at a tall, skinny building with a rounded top that looks like a bubble.

I'm so distracted by my thoughts it takes me a second to understand what he said. "What did you hear?"

"I thought..." His body tenses. "Shit." He grabs my hand and races for the bubble building. I vaguely remember seeing it from time to time while raiding the streets as Bellator, but I've never been inside—I've never been inside most buildings.

He stops in front of the doors, cupping his hands around his eyes and peeking through the glass. "There's enough light in there, right?"

I press my nose to the glass. "Enough light for what?"

"To keep things out." He glances anxiously over his shoulder, terrified someone's coming.

"It'll keep the vampires away," I say. "But that's not what you're talking about, is it?"

He shakes his head, kicks the door open, and hurries inside to the vacant lobby. The walls are stained red with blood and pieces of lost papers and ruptured windows litter the floor.

"It's the Day Takers, isn't?"

He shuts the door.

We move back from the glass doors, his eyes locked on the front of the building. "Yeah, they've been tracking us ever since we left the hillside."

"Clear since the hillside," I say. "Because they want to kill us? Wouldn't I, I don't know, repulse them just like with the vampires?"

His eyes are watered over as he shakes his head. "No, they want you more than anything."

"What?" My voice thunders and Aiden quickly flings his hand over my mouth. I shove him back, his hand falling. "The Day Takers want me? To kill me?"

His breathing is strident, his eyes about to tear up. "Please don't hate me, okay. I did this to protect you."

"You know, I'm beginning to think you might be worse of a liar than I am." I pull out my knife, intimidating him. "You keep telling me lies, which lead to more lies. Even _I'm_ not that good."

"I don't even know how they found out," he mutters, not listening to me. "I thought I got to you before they found out."

"Found out about what?"

"That you can walk with the vampires." His eyes grow begging. "Look, if you'll just come with me, we can find Xander—he can help you."

"Help me with what?" I say, no longer believing that we came here to find Xander because he might know of a cure.

"With taking it all away," he says. "All that stuff, the lying, the hearing of the hearts—he can make it all go away. He can make it so you can never change—so they can never have you."

"Is that why you really brought me out here?" I ask. "So this Xander can change me and make it impossible for me to turn?"

"Juniper." He takes me by the shoulder, fearing for my life. "Do you know how powerful you are? Think about it. You're the one and only person who can walk with the vampires. Not even the Highers can do that. You're basically invincible, and do you know what would happen if the wrong people found out about you? I mean, look what Dominic did."

"Dominic thought I was a Higher," I let it slip out and watch how he reacts. "And the Higher he put me in with, didn't kill himself. I was the one holding the knife." More fear pours off him, more than all of The Colony members combined. "Still want to save me?"

His lips start to part, speaking words of hate, I'm sure, but his gaze zips over my shoulder and I hear the crash of the door as it smashes shut. A cold breeze rushes up behind me, blowing my hair like a black veil around us. His hands fall from my shoulders, but he surprises me when his heart hits a steady calm.

"Well, well, well," a guy says, his boots tapping against the floor as he struts in. "I thought you'd make it a little harder than this Aiden. I really did."

Aiden's eyes narrow. Honestly, I expected him to run away, like a coward, especially after what I just told him. But he walks past me, towards the Day Takers. When I turn around, I find they're much different from what I pictured. In fact, they remind me a lot of the vampires from the book, with their beautiful skin and flawless features. I'd compare them to the Highers, but that would be wrong. They have color, liveliness, even if their hearts don't beat. There are five of them total—four guys and one girl—but I wonder if there are more somewhere else. Maybe these were just the ones sent to track me down.

"But I guess I really can't expect that much from you. I mean, you did choose to give it up, brother." The guy that speaks is tall and lean, with dark hair and eyes as black as ash. And his pulse is as silent as my own.

I stare at Aiden, shocked. "He's your brother?"

Aiden opens his mouth to explain, but then directs his attention back to his brother. "She's not going to turn," he says. "She's going to stay human."

His black eyes land on me, and there's something in them that makes my skin grow all warm and fuzzy. "Are those your words or his?"

I glance from Aiden, to the others, and then back to him. "I don't know what I'm going to do yet," I say truthfully. "Maybe if you could explain whatever this is," I gesture at the five of them, "then I could make my decision."

He grins, eyes dark as he lets a laughing growl from his chest. "Now that's the Kayla I remember."

"You know me?" I point my knife at my chest.

"Are you that surprised?" He raises his dark eyebrows.

"Not really." I shake my head in all honesty. "But who are you?"

"Sylas," he says, watching my reaction. But it's not ringing a bell at all. And I think he can tell. "You haven't gotten that far?"

"You mean with remembering," I say. "No, I haven't gotten past the red door."

"Is that so?" Sylas exchanges glances with the girl whose hair is as red as blood. "Emmy what do you think about all this? You think you can help Kayla remember me?"

Emmy and her blood-red hair step forward, her dark eyes lighting up as she hisses through her teeth. "Absolutely."

"No way." Aiden steps in front of me, hands spreading out, trying to shield be away. "She's not touching her."

Sylas fakes a pout, sticking out his bottom lip. "My poor little brother. He always wanted to protect Kayla, yet you were never very good at it." He pauses. "Why bring her all the way out here, to one of the most dangerous places there is? To keep her away from us? Because I don't think you're that stupid."

"I was looking for Xander," Aiden says, his voice stable. "He's the only one I could think of who could make it so she could never turn, even with medicine."

Sylas laughs, the sound ringing against the cathedral ceiling like a bell. "You were looking for Xander." He stops, his laugh dying down. "Xander threw himself off a building quite a while ago—being stuck as human finally caught up with him and he just couldn't take it."

Aiden's breath catches. "You're lying."

"No, I've never been the liar," he says. "That's always been your thing. I'm more of a truth kind of guy, no matter how harsh it is." He strides a path in front of us, tapping his finger on his lips. "It'll catch up with you too, you know," he says to Aiden. "If you keep deciding not to turn."

"You can still turn?" I say to Aiden. "You never mentioned that."

"Because it's not important," he shrugs me off. "I won't ever do it—damn myself to that life."

Before he can react, Sylas sprints forward and crashes Aiden to the floor. His legs are fast—faster than mine. Aiden's head smacks against the marble ground, the cracking a sickening sound to endure.

My eyes widen and I back away.

"Take it easy," Sylas says, holding up his hands. "You don't need to be afraid. I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to talk to you."

"I'm not afraid," I say, looking for an escape route. "And I'm not stupid enough to believe you." The hallway is close, but how can I leave Aiden behind?

"He's okay," Sylas says, stepping after me. "He's just taking a nap."

"I know he's okay." Because I can hear his heart. "But I don't know if he's going to remain okay."

Sylas presses his hand to his heart, his teeth shining as he grins. "You have my word. No one will harm you or him."

"I'm not believing anything you say, until I have an idea of what this all is."

Sylas stops, exchanging a glance with the red-headed girl again. The other three Day Takers spread across the front section of the building, so there's a wall of bodies and Aiden's lying unconscious on the floor in front of them. They're trapping me, but for what purpose I'm not sure.

It's enough for me to run, though.

I slip down the hall, hearing the commotion rising behind me like a wave. Sylas is calling orders out to them, not in English, but in the language of the Highers. There's a glass door at the end of the hall and the obvious thing would be to run out. But I'm not a fan of the obvious or with leaving Aiden behind.

I dive into a nearby room and shut the door behind me. It's black as death and I can hear the echo of their footsteps trampling down the hall; one, two, three sets of footsteps and then nothing. Two more are out there somewhere. It feels like I'm being chased by vampires, with no pulse to guide me. And I'm going in more blindly with the Day Takers. Do they bite? Feed? What's their thing? Aiden said they were killers, but in what sense?

Another set of footsteps pad down the hall. These are lazy and careless and they pause in front of the door. I press my lips together, scooting to the side of the door. It clicks open, bringing a shudder with it. I poise my knife out in front of me as someone steps in. I close my eyes, take a breath, and lunge out, slamming my body into theirs. It's like hitting a rock wall, and we both tumble out the door and to the floor. There's a rustle and then I'm on top of him. Sylas. He seems to think this is funny and lets me straddle him and presses my knife to his throat, refusing to fight back.

"Done?" he asks with a raise of his eyebrow.

I don't know what to do with this, so I crack my knuckles into his cheek.

"Ow," he chuckles, clutching his jaw. "What'd you do that for?"

I hold my knife to his throat. "I don't know."

He laughs again and I get the feeling that this is all one big joke to him and that really he could take things over whenever he wanted. "Go head." He takes my hand, pushing it against his neck.

I look into his black eyes, wondering what it would be like if I did; if I just took his life. That's when I realize I can't—I don't have it in me. I think that's when I realize that the odds of me turning out to be a Higher are low because I don't have killer instincts, at least without good cause.

I start to pull back and that's when he takes over. Flipping us over, so I'm the one trapped below him. Glass cuts into the back of my head as I try to slide out from under him. He uses force to knock my knife out of my hand and pin my arms above my head.

"I'm not going to hurt you," he says. "I just need you calm."

Then he sinks his teeth into my neck.

# Chapter 32

_"What do you think it's like to live in the outside world?" I'm twelve, maybe thirteen years old, sitting on the concrete floor._

_The guy I speak to is a few years older, with dark hair, and eyes as black as ash. Sylas._

_"Better than in here," he says, pointing at the red door. "Anything would be better than living in here."_

_A scream reverberates from the hall and I shudder. "You don't think that's Aiden, do you?" I ask._

_Sylas looks at me, his eyes glinting dangerously. "Do you worry about me like that? When I'm back there?"_

_"Do you want me to worry about you?" I try to sound confident, but he makes me nervous._

_He smiles, leaning in. "Never. I only want you to worry about yourself." Then he brushes his lips against mine._

_"You're next," Aiden says and we pull away. His arms are covered in cuts and bruises cover his face._

_I jump to my feet, leaving Sylas on the floor. "You're not healing." I touch his bruises._

_He covers my hand with his. "He didn't want me to heal today."_

_I frown. "I'm sorry you're hurt."_

_"It's okay." He brushes my hair back. "I'm feeling better now."_

_Sylas jumps to his feet and stomps down the hall._

_"You shouldn't let him confuse you like that." Aiden sits on the ground and crosses his legs. "He loves to get inside your head."_

_I sit down beside him and rest my head on his shoulder. "It's okay. He won't hurt me."_

_Aiden shakes his head and then rests it on top of mine. "He'll hurt anything if it means he gets something out of it."_

_"You shouldn't be so mean to him," I say. "He's you brother."_

_"Only by blood," he whispers. "And maybe one day that will change."_

* * *

My face rests in warm, sticky liquid that coats my hair. Blood, leaking from my neck. My eyelids flutter open and I see shoes, black with clunky soles and broken shoelaces.

"You sure she's not dead?" A voice says. "You dropped her pretty hard when you brought her in here."

"She's not dead," another answers. "Look, she's still breathing. And if you listen really really hard, you can detect her tiny little heart beat."

"So she's turning human," he says. "That means Aiden wasn't lying—she chose not to take the medicine."

"Well, it's not her choice now," the other replies. "You know Sylas will make her do it—she has to be one of us, or this won't work."

I analyze my options. There are two of them and one of me. And I'm bleeding. I never bleed, which means the medicine has finally left my system, leaving me vulnerable. My heart's also starting to come to life again and is going to take my strength away. Plus, if these guys have any of the strength Sylas has, they'll be able to kill me with a simple snap of their fingers.

And what if they bite like him? The bite—that's where the blood's coming from. God, what does that mean? That I'm infected with something? Strong or not, infected or not, I'm not one to give up. I take a deep breath and swiftly roll on my back, kicking one of them right behind the kneecap and the other one right between the legs. One collapses to the concrete ground, but the other only stumbles. I leap to my feet, but the room sways and I teeter to the side, smacking my head on a steel beam.

One struggles to his feet, while the other charges. Both their eyes are black, but burn like a fire to kill. I try to run, one foot in front of the other. But I'm weak and I hate the feeling of no control. A hand grabs me by the shoulder, his strength cutting into my skin.

I kick at him, but he only laughs. "Let me guess. You used to be really, really strong." His teeth are sharp, his lips a deep red. His sandy hair chops across his head. He's not afraid of me, not by a long shot. But the other one, the one standing behind me, fears I'll kick him between the legs again.

I knock my head back, trying to hit him in the face.

"God dammit." He grabs my hair and tugs at the roots. "Knock that crap off."

I try not to wince or scream in pain, but it's hard. It hurts and I don't know how to deal with pain. It feels like fire, hot and unnatural and it won't go away.

"Easy, boys," Sylas says, emerging from the shadows of the beams. He moves like he's commander of an army, like he knows he holds all the control in his hand. "Let her go."

They obey, but the blonde one shoves me forward. I blink, grabbing my head, my stomach churning as the world spins a wild color of chaos.

"Are you stupid?" Sylas asks, his words harsh, but his voice eerily calm. "I said not to hurt her."

"I'm sorry," Raymond apologizes, terror rushing through him. "But she kicked me."

"She can do whatever she wants," Sylas answers, black eyes on me, taking me in like I'm something delicious he wants to sink his teeth into.

"I'm sorry," Raymond apologizes with a bow of his head. "It won't happen again."

"No, it won't," Sylas says with an underlining threat in his tone.

Raymond nods and then him and the other head for the door, locking it behind them.

"Are you okay?" He asks me, a hint of concern lacing his voice. "They didn't hurt you, did they?"

I run my hand down the side of my neck, wiping the blood away. "Not as bad as your bite did."

"Don't worry, I'm not contagious." He walks the cement floor. "Do you know who I am?"

"You're Aiden's brother, Sylas," I answer, leaning back against a beam, clutching my head.

"Yeah, but do you know who I am?" he asks. "Can you remember me at all?"

I decide whether to lie or not, but it seems unnecessary. "You and I were behind the red door together at one time or another."

"That's all you remember?" His mouth curves to a pout. "I'm heartbroken."

"Maybe that's all I remember," I say. "But maybe not. Perhaps I might be more willing to tell you stuff if you were to tell me a few things."

He crosses his arms, facing me, and taps his finger on his lips. "You're exactly how I remember you." He shakes his head, smiling to himself. "All right, what do you want to know first? What we are? Why we're here? Go ahead and try to stump me with your questions"

I hold his gaze steadily. "Where's Aiden?"

His face falls into irritation. "Aiden's fine."

"That's not what I asked? Is it?"

He laughs, giving a soft roll of his eyes. "Aiden's upstairs, sleeping soundly like a baby."

I glance around at the vacant building with steel walls, pillars, and a concrete floor. "And where are we?"

"A safe place." He raps one of the beams. "Where no one—or nothing—can hurt you, which is really important right now, since you're turning human."

I'm defenseless and I'm missing my knife and backpack. "Where's my stuff?"

"In a safe place too," he says tauntingly and pauses. "So Monarch ended up giving you his watch."

I scowl. "You went through my things."

His grin's all wicked as he walks in front of me and traces a finger slowly down my arm. That strange nervous feeling from my memory creeps up in me.

"You know, a while ago you wouldn't have cared if I touched something of yours," he breathes.

I squirm uncomfortably, not sure how to react, yet unable to back away.

"Easy," he laughs softly. "I'm just messing around." He steps back. "What's your next question?"

"What are you going to do with me?"

He reflects this deeply. "I'm not sure yet." His eyebrows incline together, like he's confused himself. "So you remember the red door. What else do you remember?"

"I thought I was the one asking the questions?"

He smiles, amused. "Sorry, I forgot."

I try to ignore how out-of-control he makes me feels. "What's that place behind the red door? A lab or something?"

My question shocks him. "You really don't remember much, do you?" He asks and I shake my head. "Then you know if I explain it to you, you'll only be able to remember it from my word of mouth."

"Be as vague as you can, then," I say, sliding to the floor from my dizziness.

He nods, his hand reaching for his back pocket and he takes out a knife.

I start to scoot to my feet, but he catches me, drawing me to him by the hair.

"Ow, what are doing?" I reach up and push my hand against his face. "Let me go."

He slices the blade across my wrist. Blood oozes out as he drops the knife to the floor.

"It's a lab," he says, wiping the blood from my wrist away with the sleeve of his black shirt. Dotting my wrist are numbers, like the ones I saw on Cedrix's wrist. "It's where we were created."

# Chapter 33

My eyes widen as I push to my feet, clutching my bloody wrist "We were created?" I raise my hand, staring at the numbers blending in with the blood and my skin. This is what the Higher was talking about.

"Yeah, you didn't think you were born this way, did you? Your quickness? Your little heart trick? Your fearlessness?" He asks. "You're a lab experiment, Kayla. This is your lab number. We were all lab experiments. At least the Bellators are." When I don't say anything, he frowns. "You used to know what you were, but Monarch must have taken that away."

"Monarch?" I shake my head, taking a step back, giving pressure to my wrist, trying to get the bleeding and the pain to stop. "There's no way Monarch could be a part of this." But even my mind laughs at me.

"Of course he would," he says. "He's the doctor who ran the experiments."

I pull at my hair, my mind racing about a million miles a minute. "No, he couldn't do this—he's all I had."

"He's all we all had," he says, untangling my fingers from my hair. "But you can't hate him. He was just doing his job."

"His job." I drop to the floor, shaking my head in disbelief. "His job was to run tests on people and turn them into," I gesture at myself, "into whatever I am."

"Kayla." He kneels down in front of me, so we're eye level. "There's more to it than that, but you have to remember it on your own."

"Why?" I ask. "Whether I remember it on my own, or you tell me, it's all the same to me."

"No it's not," he says. "You're the important one—the one Monarch worked on the most. You're his Day Walker. And what's inside your head might be the most important thing in the world right now—it might be what fixes the world." He stands, brushing of his jeans. "Monarch was working on all kinds of experiments, some for the Highers, others for himself and those were the ones chosen for The Gathering. A coincidence? No one knows for sure? But why do some Bellators end up out in the desert and others don't?"

"So you have no idea how any of this happens? Or whether we're supposed to change to human or stay like this?"

"Staying human isn't an option, Kayla."

"But how do you know?" I ask. "How do you know you have to turn?

"Look inside your own head," he says. "It's what Monarch wanted us to do. If we're going to fix the world to what it was, we have to be stronger than anything in the world."

"But what about Aiden?" I ask. "Is he not a part of this?"

He sighs, standing. "He chose not to be a part of this, along with the rest of them who live on the hillside. He has a lot of anger for what happened down there." His voice lowers and so does his eyes. "It wasn't easy."

I think of the torn little boy, begging me to help him. "But you don't know what started it?" I gaze up at him. "What started the virus? What started the experiments?"

"The Highers were seeking perfection. Monarch was seeking a cure," He says. "But what started all of it—and what will cure it—I don't know." A pause. "But I think you do."

I rub at my wrist. The bleeding has slowed a little, but the numbers are still there. "Why me?"

"Because you're the perfect soldier," he says. "You're the one he finally created that could walk with the vampires."

"I'm not a soldier," I mutter. "And how do I even know if you're telling the truth?" I hate that I have to ask it, but there's something about him—perhaps that he makes me nervous and that his heart doesn't beat—that I can't tell if the words that leave his lips are the right ones.

He rubs his lips together, his black eyes burning like charcoal. He kneels to the ground, right in front of me, not speaking, not breathing. I know what he's going to do even before he does it, and I should stop it. But there's something hypnotic about the way he looks at me and I don't budge as he caresses his lips against mine. His lips are warm and sweet, like the cherry drink I was given that was laced with silver. I can see what he feels, know what he thinks. Our bodies and minds connect.

Then giving my lip a quick nip, he moves away. "Nothing but the truth ever leaves my lips."

My weak heart starts to pound with a feeling I've never felt before, but I'm not sure if it's a good feeling. I rub my lips together. "I want to see him before I do anything else."

He leans back, looking at me funny. "Who?"

"Aiden." My heart knocks in my chest.

"Whatever you want." He tries to sound calm, but his voice comes out a little annoyed. He gets to his feet and walks out the door, leaving it cracked.

I jump to my feet and start searching for an escape, so I'll be prepared, just in case this isn't what it seems. But then I slow to a stop, realizing this reaction was probably instilled by Monarch. _The perfect soldier._ I glance over my hands and arm, the cut on my wrist, the veins, the numbers.

The door creaks open and Aiden and Sylas walk in, side by side. I can see the similarities in their features. Sylas's hair is a little darker and shorter and Aiden's taller and more muscular, but their facial features are very close. The biggest difference is their eyes. Honey and black, light and dark.

Aiden immediately embraces me in a hug. "How bad are you hurt?"

"Not too bad." I glance at Sylas, picking his fingernails with a knife.

"I'm sorry." He smoothes my hair out of my face. "For not telling you about them. About you. I just didn't want to lose you to them."

"How poetic." Sylas rolls his eyes. "Now that you know he's okay, let's get into that head of yours."

Before he can finish, Aiden whirls around, guiding me behind him. "You can't do that—not with her. She self-mutilates every time she goes under."

"Were not using your little medicine stuff," Sylas says. "We're using Emmy."

"You can't sick Emmy on her," Aiden snaps hotly. "She could kill her."

"Wait a minute," I interrupt, stepping out from behind Aiden. "Emmy?"

"The red-headed girl," Aiden tells me. "She does this thing where she can make people remember all at once. But it doesn't mean it's safe. Or right. None of this is right."

"Thing?" I question.

"Like how you can send vampires running," Sylas says. "Dipping into peoples' minds is Emmy's thing. You didn't think the experiments were all the same—that was the Highers thing. Monarch was trying to create uniqueness—a Highers worst nightmare."

"It's all wrong however you look at it," Aiden says. "And let's not forget to tell her your thing. What is it again?" He asks and Sylas glares. Aiden turns to me. "He can manipulate how people feel."

My face drops. "What?"

"Yeah, he can make you feel however he wants you to at the moment, so you don't know if he's telling the truth no matter what you do."

It's like he knows about the kiss. "Look," I say to Aiden. "Do you think I know things that no one else does? Things that might lead to a cure?"

He presses his lips together. "You don't have to be one of them to find it out, Juniper."

"That's not what I'm asking," I say. "What I'm asking is if you think I might know something important that could lead us to a cure."

He shakes his head, frustrated. "You said that you heard Monarch saying you were going to fix the world, right?" he asks and I nod. "Then there's your answer."

I take a breath and then step in front of Sylas. "Okay, see what's in my head."

He smiles and then whistles through his fingers. Emmy walks in. Her eyes are black like Sylas's and her black dress fluffs out at her waist. The laces of her ragged boots drag across the floor.

"She's ready for you, Emmy," Sylas says with a grin.

Emmy smiles at me. But it's not a welcoming smile. It's fake, plastic. Really she's afraid Sylas will find out what she's hiding. A dark secret about who she really wants to be.

The two guys from earlier also enter the room, boots marching across the cement, until they reach Aiden and grab him by the arms.

"I'm staying," he says to Sylas, shaking their hands off.

"You lost all say in this when you decided to become human," Sylas says, waving his hand. "Take him away from here and keep him away until we're done."

They grab Aiden again, this time more violently, and drag him out, along with his fear that he'll never see me again.

"Should I sit or stand for this?" I ask.

Sylas glances at Emmy, and then says, "You should lie down."

I sigh, sit on the floor, and rest my head against the hard concrete. Emmy drops down on her knees beside me, her red hair a curtain around her head. I notice the numbers on her wrist as she traces her hand across my eyes.

"Your eyes look like chocolate," she says and I get the feeling she might be enjoying this a little more than she should.

"Emmy, just get on with it." Sylas sighs heavily, like he's tired of dealing with it all. "You can play around later. Just get it done."

Emmy smiles, shaking her head, and then her black eyes open wide. "Whatever you do," she says. "Don't blink."

# Chapter 34

_"Kayla, Kayla, wake up," Monarch says._

_My eyelids jerk open, spots of light blinding my pupils and I can't see._

_"Over here," he says. "I need you to focus."_

_I blink my eyes again and again until his grey eyes come into view. "Where am I?"_

_"You're in the lab," he says. "But I need you to pay attention because we don't have much time."_

_I sit up from the metal bed, bumping my head on the light. The walls have glass cabinets covering them with rows and rows of bottles and vials. There's a metal tray beside me, holding tiny tools, stained with blood._

_"Kayla," he says. "Are you paying attention?"_

_I nod, directing my focus to him._

_"Good." He glances behind him, at the door. "Something's going to happen to me—something that might seem bad, but it's not. It's good. But I need your help with it."_

_I nod. "You know I'll always help you."_

_He gives a small, nervous smile. "The first thing that's going to happen is going to be the hardest, but it'll all work out." He pauses. "I'm going to turn."_

_"Into a vampire?"_

_He shakes his head. "Into a Higher."_

_I swallow hard. "Why would you do that?"_

_"Because I have no choice," he answers, his forehead creased with worry lines. "But it's okay, because it's all going to work out. You're going to help me."_

_"Of course," I say. "Just tell me what to do."_

_He smiles, pleased, like this is exactly how he wants me to be. "In a while, I'm going to give you my watch. Now, no matter what, never lose that watch—it's the thing that's going to save us all." He pauses, running back to the door and peeking in the hall before returning. "The next thing I want you to do is just as important. You need to come back here, behind the red door. You need... you need to make—"_

_Blood. Blood everywhere. Spilling from the ceiling. Someone's screaming, echoes of murder in my head._

"Wake up, Kayla, please wake up."

_"Kayla, listen to me."_

"Kayla."

_"Please... help me."_

* * *

My eyelids twitch open. Blood drips from my forehead, down my face, in my hair. Aiden's above me, his hands on his cheeks, his honey eyes wide, his breath and heart erratic.

"Oh my God. You're okay." He stands, gently helping me to my feet, keeping a hand on my shoulder.

"Where's Emmy and Sylas?" But as soon as I ask, I spot them lying on the floor, their faces pressed in concrete and a swirl of smoke fills the air.

"It's laced with silver," Aiden says, heading for the door. When I don't follow, he comes back and grabs my hand. "We gotta go. It won't last long."

I don't budge. "I have to finish the memory—I have to know what I'm supposed to do."

He shakes his head. "No, not like this. You can do it the right way—you can do it as a human."

"And how do you know which way is right?"

"The right way is without them," he says and motions at my face. "Look what they did to you. And they would have let it go on, Kayla, until you woke up and told them what they want. Or until you died trying. I told you, they're killers."

I glance at Sylas, lying on the floor, Emmy beside him. "They told me Monarch wanted us this way."

Aiden takes my face in my hands. "Out here, we get to make our own choices about what we want to be. No one can control us. And I promise you we'll figure out what's in your head, but the right way." His eyes burn with the truth.

The door bursts open and Ryder storms in, her eyes widening when she takes in the sight of me. There's a cut across her nose and one of her knuckles is bleeding.

"You look like shit," she tells me.

"Gee thanks," I say sarcastically.

She shrugs. "Sorry, but you do."

I wipe the blood from my face the best that I can, but it's so thick on my skin and in my hair, it doesn't do any good.

"We need to get as far away from here as we can, before they wake up," Ryder says, scared out of her mind that we won't make it.

We run, but I feel like I'm leaving something behind. An unfinished memory perhaps? Or maybe a piece of myself? We race down the stairwell, the air growing light with each step. At the bottom, I spot Greyson first, red hair like fire, the purple bruise marking where I hit him. Cedrix stands next to him, watching the doorway, his one hand clutching around a small silver ball.

"Did you get the other three?" Aiden asks breathless and red faced.

Cedrix shakes his head. "There are still two wandering around. The one asshole saw me coming and bailed before the grenade exploded." He steps out the door, the silver ball gripped tightly in his hand, which trembles slightly with the fear that we won't make it out of here alive.

The building stays silent, our five heartbeats the only noise.

"Maybe we should just go," Ryder whispers, moving for the door.

Aiden nods and they swarm for the door all at once, knocking into each other as they try to squeeze through. I trail behind, still feeling like I'm doing something wrong—like I need to go back to him. I hear a rustle behind me. I glance up and see two sets of boots, moving lightly down the stairs. Instinctively, like my hands are not my own, I rip the grenade from Cedrix's hand, throw it, and wait for the silver smoke to fill and pollute the air. But the smoke never comes. The boots do, though, stampeding closer and closer.

"You idiot," Ryder hisses at me. "You didn't pull the tab."

Aiden and Ryder exchange a glance and then they all start to run for their lives, but I've seen how fast the Day Takers are, at least Sylas, and I know that we're in trouble. I slink under the stairway as they reach the bottom, holding my breath, waiting.

"Nice try with the silver grenade and everything," one says with a sharp snap of his fang. "But next time you might want to make sure it works."

I search for a weapon and spot a pipe by my foot. I pick it up, knowing I'm not as strong as I once was, but I have to try. I jump out from behind the stairwell and smack the pipe hard into the back of one's head. He screams, but doesn't fall. He turns around and my heart stutters.

"Bernard?"

His moppy hair hangs in his eyes and he wears the same condescending smile as the last time I saw him. "Kayla, pleasure seeing you again." Then he lunges for me.

I smack him in the face with the pipe and his jaw cracks, but he pops it back in place. I try again, but he knocks the pipe away.

"Sucks doesn't it?" he says. "Bet you were wishing you'd taken the medicine."

I swing the pipe for his face again, but he hits it away and lunges for me, falling on top of me as we ram to the ground. My head cracks and smoke sputters the room. Five seconds later, his heavy, unconscious body is pinning me to the ground.

Aiden throws him off with a grunt and helps me to my feet. "No more playing hero until you get used to being human, okay?"

I nod and they all pile out the door. But I pause, looking at Bernard, wondering if this is the right choice. Aiden slips his hand into mine and nods his head. "We need to go."

I nod and we sprint after them, bursting out the front door of the building. I'm relieved to see that darkness hasn't settled over the city yet. At least they have that going for them.

The five of us take off down the ash-covered street, fires roaring beside us, and we never look back. But part of me wants to look and find out what's behind me.

# Chapter 35

"We should just sleep through the night and then walk the rest of the way in the morning." Ryder paces in front of us, her matted hair pulled up in high ponytail. Her ears are strange. They have these large holes in them, which she's filled with black buttons that have red dots in the center.

After we left the bubble-top building, and the Day Takers, we ran until we reached the land where the red rocks start. There, we found a place to rest, because everyone, including myself, was getting tired.

Aiden's bandaging up my wrist with a piece of his shirt that he ripped off. But I can still feel everything; every burn, every sting, every pain. It hurts and I hate it. I feel like everything's spinning out of control and I can't stop it.

"Hey," Aiden says, drawing me back to reality. "You're going to be okay. Everything's going to heal."

"Except for the scars," I say.

The corners of his mouth quirk and he touches his eye where the scar used to be. "Yeah, maybe." He touches his cheek where there's a fresh new cut. "Maybe I'll be lucky enough to get a new one."

I forge a small smile, feeling like I don't belong out here, like I'm supposed to be doing something else—something more important. "Wait. Who's watching Maci?" I ask Ryder.

She stops pacing and her voice comes out small and guilty. "Umm... Dominic."

"What!" Aiden and I shout together.

"What's wrong with you, Ryder?" Aiden says. "I told you to keep Dominic away from her."

She looks like he's slapped her. "There was no one else, okay? I did what I had to do to save your stupid ass, which I might add, I told you was going to happen."

Aiden calms down a little. "How'd you even know we needed help? Or where to find us? Or anything for that matter?"

She fiddles with her ear piece. "Maci told me that you guys might run into some problems."

"How would she know?" He asks, wiping the sweat from his face with his shirt.

Ryder bites on her lip, glancing at me. "I'm not sure."

"Because she knows things," I explain with a sigh. "Even before they happen. Which is why she shouldn't be with Dominic."

"Dominic told me that she'd be fine with him," Ryder says, like that means something. She hops on a rock and crosses her legs. "And I didn't tell him about her little seeing gift."

Whether he knows or not, I don't trust Dominic the least little bit. And getting back to the hillside suddenly seems like my top priority.

* * *

We hide out for the night, in the shelter of an empty cave. Before anyone entered, I snuck in to check things out and make sure it was unoccupied. Then we all squished inside and sealed it with a large pile of rocks, locking away the outside, but smothering us with darkness.

I didn't mind the dark, but the others seemed a little restless. Cedrix, thankfully, has a tiny light, that clicks on and off with the flip of a button. He placed it on the ground and we all laid around it, wordlessly listening to their shrieks fill up the night.

The sounds of heavy breathing fill the cave as everyone starts to doze into dreamland. That's when it all comes rushing back to me, when I have nothing else to distract me. I was created. Monarch is a Higher. I need to save him and the world, but I don't know how. And I've left his pocket watch with Sylas.

"God, I can't believe this," I mumble to myself.

"So what did Sylas tell you?" Aiden's voice rises through my thoughts. He lies beside me, arms crossed, eyes shut.

"I thought you were asleep." I stare up at the ceiling of the cave.

His eyes open and he rolls onto his side. "I have too much going on in my mind to sleep."

"I know the feeling." I roll on my side too and there's a disturbing silence choking between us. "Why didn't you just tell me about the Day Takers? It would have saved us a whole lot of problems."

He shrugs. "Out of fear I guess. I was afraid after you learned what you were, you'd take the medicine and join them."

"But to go to the extent of dragging me out into the city to find a man who was dead? It just doesn't make any sense."

"You know what, you're right. It doesn't make sense." He rolls over so he's on top of me and can look me in the eye. "I might not agree with what the Day Takers are doing—after a life spent in a lab, the last thing I want to do is sentence myself to a life I don't want. But it's not just about what I think is right, it's about you getting yourself killed. We all had these little gifts, because of the experiments," he says. "But yours... you ended up with something that everyone is going to want—to be the one who the vampires fear. It's going to get you killed. Or worse, back in the lab." He rolls off of me and sits up. "Look what Dominic did to you."

"He tried to kill me because he thought I was going to turn into a Higher," I say. "Not because I can walk with the vampires."

"You're not a Higher, Kayla," he says. "And I think Dominic knew that... he was just afraid of you."

"But I killed the Higher," I say. "It took my hands and plunged the knife into its chest."

"Then he killed with your hands—he killed himself." He runs his hand through his dark, sweaty hair. "You're not a Higher." But he's not fully convinced; I can feel the slight hint of fear on him.

He lies back down, playing with my hair as he falls asleep. I watch his chest rise and fall with his breathing. I think about staying awake all night, just keeping my eyes open, like I used to do all the time.

But those times are gone. And after a while it becomes too much and I let my eyes shut.

# Chapter 36

At the first sign of morning, we set out for the hillside. The land is a light grey, but the air is exceptionally smoky. We walk quickly, so we're certain to make it before dark. There's a lot of chattering going on, and it starts to wear on me. I'm getting tired, hungry, aggravated, and it escalates with every second that drips by. Don't they understand we're probably being hunted? Or that Maci might be in trouble? Or that there are a million different problems?

I move up in front, putting some distance between the five of them and myself, knowing I'm being ridiculous, but I can't seem to help it—all my energy is draining away and all that's left is irritation.

After a while, Aiden jogs up to me and touches my arm, inching me close to him. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." I point over my shoulder at the rest of them. "I just needed a little break from all the talking."

He scratches at his head. "You want me to tell them to be quiet?"

I shake my head. "They're fine. It's just me. I'm just feeling a little weird."

"At first it's hard, but it'll get easier," he assures me.

I don't respond, kicking the sand with my boot because what he says doesn't make sense to me. The feeling of weakness feels potent and vile, like it doesn't belong in my body.

"I don't think we can stay at the hillside anymore." He drops his voice, leaning in. "With the Day Takers wanting you and Dominic wanting to kill you, I don't think it's a good idea to stay there."

"I know," I say with a nod. "I agree I can't stay there."

"We can start over somewhere." He brushes my hair back from my shoulder. "Find a new shelter. Those caves are all over the place around here."

"What about my memories?" I ask. "Don't you think we should find out what I know?"

"We will." He nudges my shoulder.

I smile, but my lips feel heavy. I don't like the idea of them having to pack up everything and move, not when they have so much to risk, unlike me. I can walk day or night and be fine. I make the decision then and there to leave on my own.

_"You and you alone, Kayla." Monarch says. "That's how it's got to be in the end, otherwise it'll never work."_

* * *

"I don't think I've been so happy to see a hill before." Ryder perks up as their home grows closer. "God, I just want to lie down and rest forever."

Aiden gives her ponytail a playful tug. "You're such a weakling and you know it."

She smiles and a blush creeps up in her cheeks. She sweeps her hair forward, hoping he won't notice and I catch sight of the numbers on her wrists.

_"We're going to build an army," Monarch says. "We're going to take down the Highers and put the world back the way it was. But you need to die in order to live."_

I'm about to pull Aiden aside and tell him what I hear, when I realize there's a large amount of smoke spinning in the air today. I stop at the top of a hill and gaze down to the bottom—to the hillside.

And my heart almost stops.

Fires. Everywhere. Burning high above and below the hillside and over by the pipe. Fire, just like in the city.

# Chapter 37

"No!" Ryder cries, starting to run for their burning home. But Aiden holds her by the shoulder, pulling her back, pinning her against his chest. "Let go of me!" she screams and kicks at him.

He hugs her against him, trying to calm her down as she hysterically sobs. "It's okay," he says. "I'm sure they all made it out."

"But what if the vampires got in," she says, trying to wrench away from him. "The entrance is wide open."

"Who did this?" I mumble, almost walking down, forgetting that I'm not as strong as I once was. Or as invincible.

"Perhaps the Day Takers," Cedrix steps beside me, hand in his pocket, a solemn face. "Or perhaps someone else." He points at the fires burning all around the front of the hillside. "Maybe the same someone who controls the fires in the city."

"But no one knows who does that." I reach for my knife, but realize it isn't there. "Damn it." I kick a rock, feeling helpless and useless.

"What wrong?" Cedrix asks, watching the cloud of dirt I kicked up.

"It's nothing," I say, thinking of Maci. Is she still in there? Alive? "Do you have a knife I could borrow?"

He gives me a funny look as he reaches into his pocket and hands me his knife, a small one, with a grinded blade. "If you're thinking of being a hero, don't," he says. "You're not as strong as you used to be."

Strong or not, I know what I have to do. Because I promised I'd take care of her. I take off, knowing if I don't move fast enough, he'll catch me.

"Kayla," Aiden yells on cue. I hear his footsteps thundering after me, but I keep going, up the hill and jump into the cave. I shove the rock in front of the entrance and lock him out. He bangs on the other side and I know he'll make it through very soon, so I hurry.

My ears go on alert, the knife poised out as I tiptoe my way down the tunnel and down into the main room. It's dark as death, crates tipped over, food skewed all over the place. It looks like someone was searching for something, but gave up and just broke everything instead.

I move downstairs, checking underneath the stairwell and in the corners of the room. Then I spot the knife I gave Maci, the silver blade stained red with blood.

"What happened in here?" I say, picking up the knife. A soft pulse thuds in my ears and boost my hopes that someone has survived. I pad lightly up the stairs, following the sound into the room I was once chained in, only now the chains are empty and most of the lanterns are shattered.

"Hello," I call softly. The heart jumps. "Who's in here?"

From the blankness of the corner, a small figure crawls out. "Kayla." Maci blinks and then runs to me, throwing her arms around my waist.

I pat the red-headed little girl on the head. "It's okay. It's going to be okay."

She tilts her head up to me. "I know it is."

Of course she does. "What happened?"

She rubs her eyes and steps back. "They came for you."

"Who came for me?"

Her eyes widen and her pulse lurches with fear as she utters the words, "The Highers."

The severity of the situation unexpectedly takes a turn for the worse. "Are they still here?" I turn, stabbing my knife in front of me.

"No, they're gone," she says. "They left when morning came."

I'm starting to panic. "We need to get out of here."

With no hesitation, we creep out the room. I glance from my left to my right, making sure it's clear, then grab Maci's hand and pull her along as I sprint down the tunnel for the stairs. But a crash, from the bottom room somewhere, sends me to a slamming stop. I move slowly, peeking over the railing. It's a vampire, digging through the wrecked crates and spilled food.

And it's right beside the only way out.

I quickly push Maci back down the tunnel. "Don't move," I whisper. I shut my eyes, counting under my breath. Then I hurl myself over the railing. My feet slam against the floor, knocking the wind out of me. The vampire turns and snarls, sharp teeth stained with blood. I cough as I stumble to my feet. It challenges me, standing up and walking for me like a predator. I start to worry that somehow my immunity has vanished, when it falls back, pressing against the dirt wall. I could just run, up the stairs and out into the greyness of the outside. But something inside me snaps into place, like all my wheels have locked into place.

_The perfect soldier._

I bound forward, springing on my toes as I jump for the creature that fears me. Its fangs bite out and I flinch back, fearing it might nick my skin. But then it sidesteps, trying to escape up the stairs, moving swiftly toward...

Maci.

The little girl stands at the top of the stairs, frozen, but not afraid.

"Maci, run!" I yell.

When she doesn't budge, my feet hammer up the stairs. The vampire speeds up. But so do I and with a dive, I snatch it by the legs. Our bodies ram to the floor, rotting flesh pressing in my face, knees scraping, open wounds. Just because they fear me, doesn't mean I'm immune to the virus. And I have open wounds. I jump to my feet and it reels, bleeding, lips parted.

With a fleeting swipe, I sink the knife into its chest, straight into its unbeating heart. The scream of the dying creature vibrates through the tunnels. Maci flings her hands over her ears as she and I back away from it. We watch as the vampire shrivels up until there is nothing left but bones. My first vampire kill while being human. I should be thrilled, but it feels like something inside me has died.

Maci's all eyes, mouth parted, as she stares at the vampire bones.

"It's okay," I tell her, keeping my voice soft. "It's dead."

She looks up at me and smiles. "I know."

Her happy state gives me the chills, but I nod my head. "Let's get out of here."

We start for the tunnel, but Aiden and Ryder come rushing inside. Aiden marches straight for me with a scowl on his face. "What the hell was that about?" he asks.

I point over my shoulder. "I was thinking there might be someone inside who needs my help."

He calms a little, but shakes his head. "But there could have been anything in here. You don't know what did this."

"There was only a vampire," Maci chimes in. "But Kayla killed it with her bare hands."

"Not with my bare hands." I hold up Cedrix's knife and shrug.

Aiden brushes by me, gazing downstairs at the ruined room below. Then his eyes move to the pile of bones in the middle of the stairway.

"You really did," he says to himself. "You killed one." Then he heads for the tunnel. "Let's get out of here."

* * *

After I finish explaining that Maci told me the Highers had been there, the six of us stand in a circle outside, trying to figure out what our next move is.

"We can't just leave," Ryder says. "This is our home."

"Was our home." He points his knife at the hillside, open, and lined with fires. "But it's not safe for us to stay here anymore. The Highers know where it is and so do the Day Takers." His gaze briefly flicks to me. "And they'll come looking for us."

"No, they'll come looking for her." Ryder glares and thrusts her finger sharply at me. "They want her. Not us."

Despite my dislike for her, I agree. "She's right. I think maybe I should stay behind."

"Don't be self-sacrificing." He says it without looking at me, as if he's angry.

"Let's all stay," Greyson interrupts, popping his knuckles and his neck. "If they come back, then we'll fight them."

"Only a Higher can kill another Higher," I point out. "And the Day Takers are too strong."

Another dirty look from Aiden. "Kayla's right. There's too much risk staying here."

"Yeah, and we don't want to be burned like the others," Maci says and all our eyes move to her.

"What do you mean, burned?" Ryder asks, stepping toward her.

"When they came, the Highers and the other guy with the white hair stood out there and talked," she says, pointing to the section of the ground between the hillside and us. "Then they gathered everyone together and burned them."

All our eyes land on the fires encompassing the desert land. The smoke rises to the sky, spilling its ashes into the sand.

"No, no, no..." Ryder falls to her knees, her head tipping down. Then she throws up.

* * *

The bodies are burned beyond recognition. There's nothing left but ash. It's a tragedy that no one understands, but we pull ourselves together and pack what we can salvage, which isn't much. The Highers trashed almost everything, and what they didn't destroy, the vampires did.

"I can't believe they're gone." Ryder picks up an old red sweater off the hillside floor and hugs it against her chest, breathing it in, as water floods her eyes.

"We'll get through it." Aiden pats her shoulder and scoops a bottle of water from off the ground. "We always do."

I pick up a can of food and something rolls out from under it. A vial, only it's cracked and empty. I pick it up, wondering if it once held _minte_.

"We'll find more," Aiden says from behind me.

"No we won't," Ryder says. "Cedrix already checked over there and the hospital was trashed—everything's gone or ruined."

"We'll find more," Aiden promises me, stroking my back gently, but then quickly pulls away. "Even if we have to make it ourselves."

But he's making an empty promise. He knows it. I know it. Everyone knows it. Because none of us are doctors.

"Where are we even going to go?" Ryder whines, picking up a broken bottle and chucking it across the room, sending glass through the air like raindrops.

"Do you remember that little cave we stayed in when we were first dumped—before Dominic found us?" He picks up a bag and shakes it out, dust flying. "We'll go there, at least until we can figure something else out."

She doesn't say anything, balling up the sweater and setting it in her bag.

"Hey." He hugs her. "We'll get through this."

She forces a smile.

Aiden turns around toward me. "You ready to go?"

I nod, slipping the broken vial into my pocket, not wanting to admit that the memories may never resurface—that I will never find what Monarch locked inside my head.

Aiden cups his hands around his mouth. "Gregory, Cedrix, you ready to go?"

From above us, they give him thumbs up and we meet in the middle of the tunnel. Then we head out, across the desert, leaving it all behind.

# Chapter 38

We make it to the little cave before nightfall. Everyone is quiet most of the walk, not wanting to speak about what happened, but not wanting to forget it either. The cave Aiden spoke of is small and secure on the side of a steep rocky cliff. After sending me in first to make sure it's not already preoccupied with a family of vampires, we go inside and get situated for darkness to arrive.

Aiden hasn't spoken more than two words to me since we left the hillside behind, and I begin to wonder if something's bothering him. But what could it be? Does he blame me for what happened? After a while, I decide to stop dwelling and just ask him.

I wait until he wanders over to a corner alone to set up a sleeping area for himself.

I pick up a bottle of water that's rolled next to him, kicking at the dirt with my boots. "Are you mad at me?"

He unrolls a blanket and spreads it out on the floor. "Why would I be mad at you?"

"You've seemed distant," I say and take the other side of the blanket, helping him position it evenly across the dirt. "Since we made it back to the hillside."

"You mean since you ran into the cave and killed the vampire." He gives me a suspicious look. "I guess I'm just having a hard time believing you did it all by yourself."

I toss a pillow on top of the blanket. "Who else would've helped me? And why does it matter?"

"Not who. What." He presses his lips together and pokes the blanket with the tip of his boot.

It takes me a second, but I get it. "You think I took the medicine, don't you? You think I decided to turn and I'm a Day Taker now."

He runs his hands through his hair tensely. "I just find it odd that you killed a vampire, when you were losing your strength."

"Well I didn't take it," I say. "I'm human. And I killed the vampire all by myself."

He meets my eyes. "How do I know that's the truth, Juniper? You lie all the time."

"So do you." But I take his hand, not very gently, and place it over my beating heart. "See, still human."

His hand presses down, quivering against the drum of my heart. "I'm sorry," he says, pulling his hand away and flexing it. "I just didn't know what to think."

"I think we both have some lying issues to get over," I say, thinking how strange it is that we both share the same trait.

"The truth?" He asks with an arc of his eyebrow. "From now on?"

I let out long sigh. "Haven't we said that before?"

He smiles, pulling me into his chest. "This way you can tell for sure." Then he tips my chin back and touches his lips to mine and I can feel all honesty passionately pumping through him.

"I think we should make that a ritual from now on," he says with a grin after we break away. "To make sure we're being honest with each other."

"But it only works one way," I frown, but secretly I'm glad.

He taps at my wrist—the numberless one—the one that isn't wrapped with a torn piece of his shirt. "I know how to tell if you're lying." Then he winks at me.

I smile, but it still feels like plastic, like something's missing.

* * *

Later that night, while everyone's fast asleep, I lie awake, staring at the crushed vial. The lanterns spill just enough light that I can see how empty it is. I think about how there might be a cure, and ponder if it's hidden in a vial just like this, knowing that the answer lies somewhere inside my head.

Monarch built me to be the strongest, the fastest. He built me to endure the vampires. He built me for a reason—so I could find a cure and save the world. He also built me not to be a coward. Sliding out from under the blanket, I pick up my bag and turn off the flashlight. I pause as I pass Aiden, taking in the shape of his lips, jaw, the way he winces when he sleeps.

"Good-bye." I whisper so softly there's no way it can be heard. I slide the boulder aside and step out into the night, making sure to close it securely behind me.

Leaving in the middle of the night might seem like a terrible thing to do, but Aiden would never let me walk away alone. And staying with them would only risk their lives. With the Highers after me, it's too risky. So I set out through the darkness to go find Sylas—to go find my memories—to find a cure.

The vampires' shrieks ricochet the night, shrill and ravenous. But I'm not afraid. How could I be?

When they're the ones that fear me.

# Epilogue

From the top of the cliffs, I watch them prowl the night, keeping on high ground, out of the vampires' eyes. They move quietly, hunting for the one that knows the answers to the questions they seek. I can make out which figure belongs to him. It's darker and stands taller than the rest. He moves like air, like I used to before I turned back and secretly I envy him.

I sneak quietly behind them, keeping my distance, making sure I'm the one that finds him. Making sure he understands I make my own decisions—that I'm in control.

They hop from rock to rock, finally ducking down between the cracks of the cave, slipping into blackness, and with a deep breath, I follow, my boots grazing the side of the rock, making me wince against my human mistake. But we all make mistakes. It's how we fix them that makes us who we are.

When I reach the bottom, there's only one way to go. I lie flat on my stomach and slink into the narrow cave, my feet clumsy and graceless. A fire burns from the middle of the cave, but no one surrounds it.

I circle around it, wondering where they disappeared to.

"I thought you were looking for me." The touch of his breath brushing against my ear makes my stomach twist with nervousness.

"I didn't have a choice," I turn to face him. "You're the only one I know who can help fix it all now."

Sylas' black eyes smolder in the light of the fire and he holds out his hand. "Then let me help you fix it."

Hesitantly, I take his hand and he entwines our fingers, locking us together. "You better not hurt me," I warn.

"I won't." He smiles, giving my hand a squeeze. "You can trust me Kayla."

All I can do is hope he isn't lying, because with him, I just can't tell.

# About the Author

Jessica Sorensen is a _New York Times_ and _USA Today_ bestselling author who lives in the snowy mountains of Wyoming. When she's not writing, she spends her time reading and hanging out with her family.

* * *

For more information: jessicasorensen.com

# Also by Jessica Sorensen

**Darkness Falls Series:**

Darkness Falls

Darkness Breaks

Darkness Fades

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Rebels & Misfits Detectives:**

Spies, Lies, & Cupcakes

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Signed with a Kiss Series (Honeyton Alexis):**

Accepting the Deal

The Start of a Mysterious Mystery

A Truthful Kiss

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**The Heartbreaker Society Curse:**

The Heartbreaker Society Curse

The Curse of the Unordinary

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Enchanted Chaos Series:**

Enchanted Chaos

Shimmering Chaos

Iridescent Chaos

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**The Breathing Undead Series:**

Breathing Undead Lies

Untiled (coming soon)

* * *

**My Cursed Superhero Life:**

Cursed

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Capturing Magic:**

Chasing Wishes

Chasing Magic

Chasing Promises

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Chasing the Harlyton Sisters Series:**

Chasing Hadley

Falling for Hadley

Holding onto Hadley

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Tangled Realms:**

Forever Violet

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Curse of the Vampire Queen:**

Tempting Raven

Enchanting Raven

Alluring Raven

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Unraveling You Series:**

Unraveling You

Raveling You

Awakening You

Inspiring You

Every Single Breath

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Unexpected Series:**

The Unexpected Complications of Revenge

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Shadow Cove Series:**

What Lies in the Darkness

What Lies in the Dark

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Mystic Willow Bay Series:**

The Secret Life of a Witch

Broken Magic

Stolen Kisses

One Wild, Crazy, Zombie Night

Magical Whispers & the Undead

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Standalones:**

The Illusion of Annabella

* * *

**Broken City Series:**

Nameless

Forsaken

Oblivion

Forbidden (coming soon)

* * *

**Guardian Academy Series:**

Entranced

Entangled

Enchanted

Entice

The Forest of Shadow and Bones

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**Sunnyvale Series:**

The Year I Became Isabella Anders

The Year of Falling in Love

The Year of Second Chances

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**The Coincidence Series:**

The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden

The Redemption of Callie and Kayden

The Destiny of Violet and Luke

The Probability of Violet and Luke

The Certainty of Violet and Luke

The Resolution of Callie and Kayden

Seth & Greyson

The Evermore of Callie & Kayden

Untitled (coming soon)

* * *

**The Secret Series:**

The Prelude of Ella and Micha

The Secret of Ella and Micha

The Forever of Ella and Micha

The Temptation of Lila and Ethan

The Ever After of Ella and Micha

Lila and Ethan: Forever and Always

Untitled (coming soon)

Ella and Micha: Infinitely and Always

* * *

**The Shattered Promises Series:**

Shattered Promises

Fractured Souls

Unbroken

Broken Visions

Scattered Ashes

* * *

**Breaking Nova Series:**

Breaking Nova

Saving Quinton

Delilah: The Making of Red

Nova and Quinton: No Regrets

Tristan: Finding Hope

Wreck Me

Ruin Me

* * *

**The Fallen Star Series:**

The Fallen Star

The Underworld

The Vision

The Promise

The Lost Soul

The Evanescence

The Mist of Stars (untitled)

* * *

**The Darkness Falls Series:**

Darkness Falls

Darkness Breaks

Darkness Fades

* * *

**The Death Collectors Series (NA and YA):**

Ember X and Ember

Cinder X and Cinder

Spark X and Spark

* * *

**Unbeautiful Series:**

Unbeautiful

Untamed
