Okay hear me out for one second!
I know that all we do as italians on the internet
is complaining about how you're not 
able to make our food the proper way
And to be honest, most of the time, 
we're right
It's annoying but we're right
But we have so much pride in our food
and that's why we leave those 
long angry comments under Facebook videos
*cough* Tasty
that make our food look completely different
And [rambles] it's just awful, awful to see!
But in this video I'm going to tell you about
all the food that you think is Italian, 
but actually isn't
and some of those things don't even exist here in Italy
So I don't know why some things are now 
known to be Italian
when we didn't even invent them
I don't know!
First up: Fettuccine Alfredo
And okay I'm gonna give it to you,
they have been invented by an Italian chef 
here in Rome
but he exported it in the US
And we don't know what that is!
You're not gonna find it in an Italian restaurant
or at like family dinners.
Maybe you're gonna find it now because
people are trying to appeal to tourists more
But it's not a thingy that is like usual for us.
Next one is Garlic Bread
and I assure you you're not gonna find it in any Italian restaurants here
I don't know how it came about but all we do with bread
is to put like oil and salt on it
but garlic is not a big ingredient here
and we definitely do not put it on bread
I'm sure it's nice! It's lovely! 
But it's not our thing.
Okay now: if you think that *this* is mozzarella
...you're wrong.
Because that's not our kind of mozzarella
And to be honest I don't know what 
you're supposed to do with that
Like, does it melt? Do you grate it?
How...? I don't know!
Our mozzarella is completely different
and it's soft and squishy!
And like... they don't even look related!
Why... [rambles] is not the same thing, they...
... No! Please! [laughs]
Then we have: Pepperoni Pizza
And one thing that I have to explain to you:
if you're gonna ask for a pepperoni pizza in Italy
they are going to bring you a pizza with peppers!
Because "peppers" in Italian is "peperoni",
so basically the same word, without a p.
So that's what you're gonna get!
If you want what you *think* is a Pepperoni Pizza
you have to ask for a Diavola!
Which is with spicy salamis on it
and is amazing, it's my go to!
So please do not disrespect the Diavola [laughs]
Which means like "Devil's style"
because is spicy.
And it's so good, so learn the difference
because peppers are peperoni,
and what you have on your pizza is
salame with an E
not with an I! [giggles]
On the topic of pizza
what the heck is Chicken Pizza?!
I've never seen it, in my 22 years of 
eating pizza almost every weekend
I've never seen it, never encountered it!
It's not italian.
I'm sure it's nice!
Even though you're the ones that put pineapple on pizza
and that's a disgrace, please, WHY!
Then: Breadsticks!
And we don't have those or if we do 
they are completely different
because I'm guessing breadsticks are soft,
like bread.
What we have is: Grissini
and they are thin and they are crunchy
so totally different!
So we did not invent breadsticks and if we did something similar
we don't eat it at the table as an appetizer.
so I don't know where you got that from!
Sorryyyyy!
Okay one thing that makes me really mad
you're not gonna see in Italy EVER
is when they serve you pasta
with the sauce on top
just on top!
not mixed in!?
WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?
Pasta gets tacky and sticky
and gets inedible basically within seconds
of being out of water
if you don't put anything else with it!
So mix your sauce, please!!
And oooh! Do you want an italian grandma 
to die on the spot?
Well I have the phrase for you to say:
tell her that you eat pasta with ketchup.
She's gonna die,
I'm gonna have an heart attack,
the whole nation is gonna crumble
because that's unacceptable, UNACCEPTABLE!!!
Don't do that, ever, ketchup belongs with french fries
or whatever else that isn't pasta
Then let's talk about Italian Dressings!
And it has Italian in the name, it has to be Italian! /s
Not it isn't!! [laughs]
Because in our salads all we put is oil, salt and some people vinegar
and that's about it
So I don't know where you got that from!
Yeah... it's mostly our flavours
and what we use in our things, but not in salads!
At all!
And I've saved the worst for last
What is this?!
What is Chicken Parmigiana, Parmesan?
However you wanna call it.
Our Parmigiana is this lovely thing
made with eggplants!
Do you see chicken in any of that??
NO!
But I could be alright that you make it with chicken
but I've seen most Chicken Parmesans
with pasta underneath it.
WHAT?!
And with the sauce not mixed in, which, WHAT?!, again
But how are you supposed to cut the meat
without getting in the way of pasta?
And the other way around?
How does that work?
Why are you gonna make things more complicated?
I don't know, I don't know what to say!
Well I hope you enjoyed this video
and seeing me get angry about this stuff,
because this is the only thing I care about
But if you need definitely share it with your friends
so they can learn something as well
& we all can be knowledgeable about stuff 
that isn't Italian
Please... let's stop the LIES! About fake Italian food!
But if you want to watch more videos about 
Italian things,
I have two more about how you pronounce some foods
that apparently are very difficult to pronounce
And if you want to can subscribe to my channel
by clicking that face over there
And you can subscribe to my Italian channel
where I have subtitles so 
if you want to learn a bit of Italian
you can go there, click up here!
Thank you so much for watching,
I will see you in my next video byeeeeee!!
