- Most cities got one hood.

See how the audience laughed at that?

Most motha-fuckin' cities got one hood.

The whole map is free.
They tell you don't go here.

Not in Jacksonville.

They got spots all around the
map you should look out for.

All the hoods sound like
dangerous sitcoms.

(In narrator voice)
Tonight on another episode
of "Washington Heights."

Something's going down
on "Washington Heights"
I'm pretty sure of that.
If I know any of the hoods in America
I know...
(In narrator's voice) Stay
tuned for another addition
of "Cleveland Arms."

It's got arms in the title.
I know that's dangerous.

Eureka Gardens

Eureka means surprise!
Maybe you shouldn't be here.

You lookin' for gardens

Jacksonville do it big.
It ain't just hoods,
they got certain streets.
If you even type it in your phone,

your phone will not let you make it there.

If you type in Martin Creef

Your phone say relocating.

What?

Just beautiful shit.
Shit you only going to have
in Jacksonville.
Jacksonville is the biggest
motha-fuckin' city out there.
Every 10 blocks
is another
mutha-fuckin' neighborhood.

If you're comfortable, don't
be comfortable too long.
Enjoy yourself.

Most places you go, when
you go to the gas station,
the only thing you gotta look
at is the price of the gas.
Not in Jacksonville.
You gotta look at some other shit
than the price of gas.
You had to look at all the
surroundings of the gas station.

You ever decided you didn't need gas
as bad as you thought you did?

You ever got back in your
car to not get the gas?
I don't need this gas.
Mmm.Mmm.

I can make it almost home.
If I just keep on going,
I can get a little closer
to somewhere

There's 32 muthafuckers out there.
They selling pit bull
puppies and frying fish.
Mmm Mmm
I'm not going to do all that for some gas.
I'm not.

Love Jacksonville.
Jacksonville they got shit at all ends.
If you want to shop,
they got great shopping.
They got great shopping and
then they got hood shopping.

If you looking for the great shopping
you listen for the
white-sounding official name.

Town Center

That sounds official.
Town Center

We built this mall
then we built the rest of the town.

The black mall sound like a club
Going down to The Regency.

They got 2-for-1 drink
special at The Regency.
Who don't want to go to The Regency?

Free before 11.

One thing I like about Jacksonville is
no matter where the fuck you eat
all the food is good than a muthafucker.
Y'all know how to eat in Jacksonville.

Everything
We had 12 things, everything was good.
Go to Jacksonville Beach,
they got white people
making Caribbean food and shit.

You like, you don't got
no Jamaicans back there?
Who the fuck is jerking this chicken?
Let me find out a white
woman is jerking this chicken
like that, that is...

Most places places you go,
if you hear a crazy name
you can't eat there.
But here in mutha-fuckin' Jacksonville,
they tell you it's good,
it's good.
That mutha-fuckin' Soul Food Bistro

I don't even know if the
niggas know what bistro mean,
but it's good as shit!

Food so good, you be lookin'
for a slave in the back.
Like, who the fuck is making
mmm mmm
Show me somebody look
like a slave back there.
Who the fuck puttin' they
foot in this cornbread?

