 
# Chaos Volume 2

### Books 4-6

## Claire Farrell

### Contents

Copyright

Usurper

Introduction

Copyright

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Blight

Introduction

Copyright

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Kings

Introduction

Copyright

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Sacrifice

Preface

Copyright

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Afterword

About the Author

Books by Claire Farrell:
**Copyright © Claire Farrell**

Book cover image provided by Yocla Designs

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**Licence Notes**

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All Rights Reserved.

 Created with Vellum

# Introduction

By Claire Farrell

Editing by Red Adept Publishing Services

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It's been a year since Cara returned to the human realm with her daughter, and the fae have come knocking again. The game of kings is still being played, power is the ultimate prize, and Scarlet is an asset every court wishes to acquire.

As Sadler's next move is revealed to be his deadliest yet, and Scarlet's burgeoning powers begin to develop into something that can't be hidden, Cara realises that something more significant than a faery promise is needed to protect her family. It's time for her to build on what she started in Sadler's court.

But although the game is seductive, the price of winning might be too costly for a human to pay.
Cover by Yocla Designs

* * *

**Licence Notes:**

* * *

_All Rights Reserved._

 Created with Vellum 

# Chapter 1

I took an upstairs seat on the bus home from work and stared out the window at a grey, lifeless world. After everything I had gone through in the faery realm, the human one still seemed dull and jaded.

Two stops later, I regretted my choice of seats when a group of belligerent junkies boarded and decided to sprawl out to the right of me. A young woman slurred loudly while her male companion drifted off, still clinging to the syringe he had just used to inject himself. People used to hide such things, but lately, they flaunted their shame.

I used to pity junkies and wonder why nobody in their lives could help them. After my ordeal, I hated them because they were a distinct reminder of the faery who had been addicted to my suffering. Maybe that had coloured my view of the entire world.

I counted down the stops as the group grew louder. An elderly man harrumphed before descending the stairs. A half-empty cider can was flung after him, barely missing his head. The sound of the can rolling down the stairs infuriated me. I turned my head and glared at the group. The passed-out man had slid lower in the seat, his arm hanging off the side, his fingertips grazing the filthy floor. Four others were passing around a half-smoked joint.

The oldest-looking woman, probably haggard from her lifestyle rather than age, stared back at me defiantly. "The fuck are you looking at?"

I kept my gaze on her for at least ten seconds, imagining how I might have treated her in the faery realm, picturing the violence that would have been acceptable. I never returned from the faery realm unchanged, and my time in the Chaos Court couldn't be undone. I had been a queen for a little while, but in the human world, I was nothing. If it hadn't been for Scarlet, chances were I would have gone out in a blaze of glory.

Something hit me then—a feeling. No, a memory. A man sitting behind the mouthy woman caught my attention. His overly large pupils rolled upward as he gripped her arm with one hand, while his other arm was draped across the shoulders of the passed-out junkie. For an instant, I saw Sadler. Despite having three kings to maintain control, the fae were still doing whatever they liked in the human realm. So little had changed, and none of it appeared to be for the better.

With a shudder, I jumped to my feet and ran down the stairs to escape the memories. Maybe I was trying to outrun the rapidly growing darker side of my nature. I got off the bus at the next stop and walked the rest of the way home, focusing on the brighter sides to my life in an attempt to shake off the rage that was slowly consuming me. But the thundering noise of it was deafening and impossible to ignore.

I was so _angry_. With the faeries. With myself. I was trying to remember humanity and how to fit into a world where magic wasn't supposed to exist. It had been a year since I returned to the human world with my daughter, and coming home had only made me realise how much I had changed and how little I belonged. I had known two realms, and I fit into neither.

I had forbidden Bekind and Anya from using magic in the human realm to avoid drawing attention to us. Still, when I was offered a job after the first interview I attended—despite my sketchy record—I blamed both of them for influencing my new boss. On day one, when he slapped my backside, I understood, but I needed the job. Working in an office every day was actually killing me, but I had to be responsible. Despite the craziness of my story, my grandparents had given us all a place to stay, but I needed to support us, too.

My grandfather had always hoped to see proof of the fae, and my grandmother was quietly accepting of the situation as she understood it, but I was pretty sure neither of them had a clue of what I had gone through. We were the kind of family who kept secrets and didn't speak about the things that made us uncomfortable or unhappy. We plastered on fake smiles and pretended all was well. That had frustrated me so much when I was a kid, but as an adult, I did the same thing. I protected them from the horror so they could keep wearing their smiles, but I sometimes saw a haunted look in my grandfather's eyes. What we kept hidden would eventually burst to the surface. I just hoped we were ready to deal with it when the time came.

Zoe had been my shoulder to cry on for the last year. Bekind and Anya formed a protective shield around my daughter at all times. I was surrounded by people who gave me their unconditional loyalty, yet there was a hollow inside my heart that could only be filled in the faery realm. Time and distance hadn't quelled my longing. It had only made me bitter and vengeful. The fact that I had come to understand Ronnie, a human who had lost her mind over the fae's treatment of her, was terrifying.

Finally reaching my neighbourhood, I breathed a sigh of relief. I felt eyes on me, but I was used to that feeling. The fae were always close. Whoever watched us refused to show themselves, and I was pretty sure we owed that to Brendan. He still had a debt to fill, and he was unlikely to allow his temporary heir to be murdered before he got a new one.

I put a smile on my face and opened the front door.

Anya, Scarlet in her arms, appeared in the hallway. "Cara?"

My daughter's eyes brightened when she saw me. I took her from Anya and held her close. Every inch of me relaxed once she was in my arms. I was different when she was with me, better. She giggled then babbled a bit, one word sounding like "Mama." I kissed her chubby cheeks and brushed her dark hair off her face. Her eyes had grown as violet as her father's, but her left pupil had spread into a black teardrop. I felt uneasy every time I saw it. Scarlet was my link to everything, fae and humanity, purity and the terrible things I had gone through to have her. She had forced my sanity to remain by tethering me to everything at once.

"Any change?" I asked Anya.

Anya folded her bronze arms and pursed her lips. "No, your baby has not turned into a psychopathic killer today. Thanks for asking."

I gave her a stern look. "I'm going to get changed. I'll take her with me."

The pixie held out her arms. "I'll look after her while you get ready for dinner."

I moved Scarlet out of her reach, trying to remember to smile. "I won't be long. Help with dinner, okay?" I was gone before she could react, running up the stairs to spend some precious few minutes alone with my daughter. We were expecting guests, and I was sick of sharing.

In the room I shared with Bekind, Anya, and Scarlet, I sat my daughter on the spotless rug and watched her grip my duvet to pull herself to her feet. She had grown achingly close to walking on her own.

"Almost there, princess," I said then laughed. "Princess" was a technical truth, considering I had been married to a king—I still was, if details were important. I picked out a more comfortable outfit. "How about this?" I asked, holding it up.

Scarlet ignored me and grabbed at the air. I shivered in case there really was something I couldn't see. I changed quickly, only hesitating to take a look at the black veins in the crook of my elbow. Those had appeared after I left the faery realm, so I worried that the taint had spread into the human realm. If it did, I hoped that the stick I had used to kill Scarlet's grandfather would help somebody find a way to stop the taint's growth.

Scarlet made a sound to catch my attention. I lifted her onto the bed to play. She was growing so fast, and she was such an affectionate, smiley child that nothing in the world seemed wrong in her presence. I just wished I could have given her more, everything she deserved.

A black cat raced into the room, leapt on the bed, and transformed into a woman. Scarlet was too used to that to pay any attention.

Rolling my eyes, I threw my discarded jumper at Bekind. "How many times do I have to tell you not to do that? You're going to give my grandfather a heart attack."

"He's not in the room, Cara." She reached out and stroked Scarlet's face. "How was your day?"

I saw the affection in her eyes and wondered why she still couldn't bring herself to hold my daughter unless it was absolutely necessary. "Same. 'Cept I saw a faery on the bus home. He was with a group of junkies. He had the whole addicted to human emotion thing down."

She shrugged. "Probably one of the forgotten. They waste their lives in the human realm and forget to go back home. Most of them forget who they are. They're barely fae."

"Sadler did that, remember?"

"Perhaps somebody reminded him just in time."

"Like his god?"

"Let's hope his god was a figment of his imagination."

"So what did you do all day?" I asked, leaning back against the pillow and drawing Scarlet closer. She struggled to get out of my arms, more interested in playing with the buckle on my jeans than with me.

"Spied," Bekind said.

"Hear anything interesting?"

"No change. At least, an all-out war hasn't begun in the faery realm. There is, however, a male nymph haunting the bingo hall your grandmother is so fond of."

"A male... nymph?" I screwed up my nose. I didn't think I had come across one of those before. "Is that bad?"

"Depends on who you ask." The corners of her mouth curved up. "He provides a service to lonely old woman and gains much from their... enjoyment."

"What? Ew, Bekind." I reached out and clasped her arm. "But not my grandmother, right?"

She cackled. I let go of her, and she fell off the bed, still laughing. Scarlet crawled to the edge of the mattress and slid over until her feet were on the floor. She took one faltering step before gripping the bed again.

"Did you see that?" I asked. "She practically walked!"

Bekind sat up, her laughter dying. "How will you act when she turns her first person into a toad?"

"Not funny." I stood, picked up my daughter, and headed downstairs, ignoring Bekind's fresh giggles.

Anya was scowling when I entered the kitchen, but her face lit up at the sight of Scarlet. A pang of jealousy tugged at me as my daughter reached for the pixie.

"Hey, Gran," I said. "I think you should switch bingo halls. Like now."

My grandmother gazed at me in surprise. She looked almost exactly as she had when I was a kid, except for some snow-white hairs speckling the dark grey. "Is there a reason?"

"Yes." I took a seat at the counter. "An excellent reason that you really don't need to hear."

She smiled at Scarlet, touching the child's chin. "You worry too much, Cara."

Or maybe everyone else didn't worry enough.

"I didn't hear you come in," Granddad said as he entered the room. "How was work?"

"Oh, same as usual." When I had turned up on his doorstep with a baby and some faeries, a lot of serious conversations had ensued, stories I attempted to sugar-coat. Despite his outward acceptance of the situation, I was pretty sure his hair was whiter than it had been when he'd answered the door that day.

Bekind joined us, fortunately wearing clothes, and the conversation turned. My faery friends and my human grandparents weren't exactly comfortable together, but they put up with each other for me, for Scarlet. I was pretty lucky, all things considered. I was alive, I had my daughter, and I was surrounded by family and friends. I should have been happy.

And if the longing to return to the faery realm ever went away, I was sure I would be.

Dinner was almost ready when the doorbell rang. My grandparents and I froze then looked at each other.

"Okay," I said. "This is it."

Gran reached out to brush my hair away from my face. "You'll be fine."

"Yeah, of course." I had been both dreading and looking forward to the visit for a while. I headed to the front door, took a deep breath, and opened it.

Zoe stood outside with my mother, both of them looking uncomfortable. My mother looked thinner, and the lines around her eyes had deepened. I stared at the woman who had sent me away and wondered if she regretted it. "Hi," I said at last. "Nice to see you."

"Thanks for inviting me." My mother looked at Zoe. "And thanks for bringing me."

"No problem." Zoe gave me a meaningful look.

"Oh," I said. "Come in. Dinner's just ready. Everyone's in the kitchen, so... go right in."

I stepped aside to make room. As she passed, Zoe squeezed my hand and pulled me after her. I was so glad she had come. I wouldn't have been able to open the door if I hadn't known she would be standing there.

My mother looked all around as she made her way into the kitchen. My grandparents stood shoulder to shoulder as if about to block her way. I let them have their moment, quickly stepping around them to move closer to Scarlet.

Mam stared at her parents for a long time before trying on a weak smile for size. "Mam. Dad. It's... it's good to see you."

My grandmother immediately pulled my mother in for a hug. "I've missed you, Elaine. So, so much."

"You knew where I lived, Mam."

"You hardly forgot where we lived, Elaine," my grandfather said sharply, but his eyes were glistening.

Mam stepped away from Gran, her shoulders back. I saw the warning signs and decided it was time to intervene. I picked up Scarlet from her high chair. She gave a gurgle of delight that caught my mother's attention.

"This is my daughter," I said. "This is Scarlet."

Mam stepped toward us then hesitated, her hand moving to her mouth. "Can I...? She's _beautiful_."

My mother approached, but I took an automatic step back. I held my daughter tightly. I understood my mother's reasons for a lot of things, but I couldn't wholly trust her, not with Scarlet's heart. I wouldn't let anyone hurt my daughter the way I had been hurt. I wouldn't let anyone make her feel as though she weren't good enough. I would do anything to stop history from repeating itself.

Mam's face fell. "She looks a lot like you."

"I don't think so," I said in a meaner tone than I had intended.

"Her eyes are so unusual," she whispered.

"It's a defect." I narrowed my own eyes at my mother. "And I don't want to talk about it."

"We should eat," my grandfather said in a tight voice. "Take a seat, everyone. Zoe, it's nice to see you again."

Zoe snorted. "Can't keep away from the madness."

I strapped Scarlet into her high chair next to my seat while the others settled around the table. My grandmother started serving the food. Bekind helped, and my mother watched her as if trying to figure out who she was.

"I forgot to introduce you," I said. "These are my... friends. This is Anya, and that's Bekind." I pointed to each of them.

Anya had glamoured herself to look more human. Strangely, Scarlet acted as though there was no difference.

"Bekind," my mother said quietly, "have we met?"

Bekind looked at my mother, her chin trembling. "We haven't been introduced." Bekind had watched over my mother, too, and had been there when Mam was attacked by my biological father. I wished all of our truths were laid out on the table. I was sick to death of secrets.

"Let's eat," Gran said, beaming. In her mind, her family was back together. It wasn't that simple for me. I wished it could be.

Mam gazed longingly at Scarlet. "How old is she?"

I cleared my throat. "She turned one last week."

"And is she sleeping well for you?" She nodded at the carrot Scarlet was gnawing on. "She looks like she has a good appetite."

"Yeah, she's great." I looked to my grandmother for help. Small talk wasn't my strong suit.

"Oh, she's amazing," Gran said. "Such a good baby. You wouldn't know there was a little one in the house except for all of the giggling."

"You must be enjoying her," Mam said, nodding at Gran. "You and Dad always loved kids."

"They've been a great help." I smiled at Anya. "Bekind and Anya, too."

An uncomfortable silence draped over us.

"Cara," Gran said after a few minutes, "pass your mother the mashed potatoes."

I handed the bowl across the table, but my mother grasped my wrist instead.

"Is that a _wedding_ ring?" she asked.

I pulled my hand away and put it in my lap under the table. I hadn't taken off Sadler's rings, and I couldn't explain why. It was some sick stubbornness in me that kept the reminders around. "Yes."

"You got married? I mean, when? To whom? Where is he now? What about Scarlet?"

I looked up at my mother and frowned. "Nobody you know. We're here to keep him away from Scarlet."

"Oh, I..." She glanced at my grandfather then looked back down at her plate.

Zoe made some attempts at conversation, but it seemed as though the evening would turn into a massive failure. Having Scarlet made me want to reconcile with my own mother, but maybe it would never work.

"It seems like a lot of people to help take care of one baby," Mam said, toying with her food.

"I work. They help. It's no big deal."

"What I meant was..." She dropped her fork and gave me an earnest look. "What if I took Scarlet in the mornings? I mean, it would be—"

"She's not going near that house," I said firmly. "She's never going near that man." I couldn't risk it.

"He's her grandfather, Cara. And with no—"

"He's not her grandfather." Too late, I realised what I had said. "He's nothing to me."

She gazed at me for a long time as she worked through what I had said. My heated cheeks probably said a lot more. She slammed her palm on the table and glared at her own father. "You _told_ her? After everything we said?"

Granddad's face darkened as he pushed away from the table and stood. "I _should_ have told her. I should have told her a long time ago. You can't keep secrets like that. She hasn't told me much, but I _know_ he punished her for it."

"You weren't around to know anything!" Mam's cheeks reddened. "It wasn't your business to talk about things I didn't want to discuss."

"But it was _your_ business to protect her from the secrets!" he bellowed. "I sat back and watched you marry that animal, and I let you cut me out of my granddaughter's life because I thought you would see sense when the grief over Darragh's death eased, but I won't allow you to continue under the illusion that you did the right thing. I won't go on pretending that nothing happened! Not now. Not anymore!"

Scarlet whimpered. I stood and lifted her out of the high chair before Anya could get the chance. "Granddad didn't tell me," I said wearily. "I'm the only one in the family with black hair, and your husband hated me. It was kind of obvious." I just hadn't wanted to believe it until the fae told me the truth.

"I... I can't..." Mam's face crumpled, and she got to her feet. "I need to go."

"No," Gran stated. "You can't keep running from everything that scares you. This is your chance. Do you not see that? Darragh is _gone_ , Elaine. Cara is all you have left, and she could leave any day now because she doesn't want Scarlet to have the kind of childhood she had. She's ready to run in case the man she married comes for her. So take the opportunity and get to know your grandchild." She reached out and took my mother's hand. "Trust me, my love. You'll regret every second you miss of her life."

Mam swallowed a couple of times as her eyes filled with tears. Granddad sat down, looking like a broken man. Bekind was gazing at her clenched fists, appearing more uncomfortable than I had ever seen her. Anya was soaking up the atmosphere, listening intently to every word as if trying to learn how to be part of a dysfunctional human family.

Mam finally looked at me. "I'm sorry." Her voice cracked. She took her seat again. "I'll stay."

I tried to let her emotion reach me, but I was too full to the brim with hate. I wanted to be her daughter again, and I wanted Scarlet to have a mother who wasn't eaten up with resentment. I just didn't know how to make any of that happen.

# Chapter 2

By the time my mother put on her coat to leave, I was exhausted. With Scarlet in my arms, I walked her to the door.

"Thank you," she said. "For letting me see her, I mean. She's so beautiful. She reminds me of you as a baby. I wish... I wish everything could be different, Cara." She surprised me with a hug. "I love you. _Never_ forget that."

I couldn't speak. The last time a person told me he loved me and to never forget it, he had married somebody else and given up any claim to his daughter. The word "love" didn't sit well with me anymore, if it ever had.

Zoe came up behind us. "We'll talk tomorrow," she murmured to me. "Hold up, all right?"

I nodded, smiling when she bent her head to kiss Scarlet. My daughter clung to my only human friend's freshly dyed chestnut hair as if she didn't want her to leave. Laughing, I helped free Zoe from Scarlet's clutches.

Zoe walked down the garden path after my mother. "I love that kid!" she called over her shoulder.

I looked down at Scarlet. She was beaming up at me. "Yeah," I whispered. "Me, too."

I started to brush my nose against hers, but a movement in the garden caught my eye, making my heart momentarily stop. I casually stepped inside and locked the door.

In the kitchen, I handed Scarlet to Anya. "Bekind, get the bag. Anya, be ready to run."

Bekind ran upstairs while Anya gathered Scarlet to her.

"Nobody panic," I said, "but there's somebody in the garden. Came closer than usual. And they could be looking in the window, so no acting nervous." I moved to the fridge, grabbed a drink, and took a sip. "I'm going to check it out."

"You have the dagger?" Granddad asked.

"Always."

"Do you need me?"

I knew by his reaction that my smile had turned dark. "I can handle this," I said, and a part of me was excited to see what would happen next.

I took one more look at my daughter in case I never saw her again. Whoever was outside might not be an enemy, but I wasn't taking any chances. As long as Bekind and Anya had any say in the matter, Scarlet would be safe. If somebody really had come for her, I could at least give my friends time to get a head start. We had been preparing for this day since we'd arrived.

Still smiling, I headed out of the kitchen and into the living room. I peered through the patio doors. Nothing. I took the dagger out of my boot and gripped it with one hand. The design that had been burned into the metal from the blood of a fenris gave me confidence. I thought of it as my lucky charm. I quietly slid the door open and slipped outside. I hadn't sat around feeling like a victim since my return. I would never be a victim again; I was ready to fight back.

I took a deep breath and concentrated. I heard a light footstep, and the wind picked up, sending shivers through me. My thin shirt couldn't protect me from a faery wind. The summer evening sky darkened. A lilac glow appeared then disappeared in an instant. Somebody had crossed over. Somebody knew where to find me.

The wind died, and I moved slowly around the house, trying to find any signs of entry. The windows and doors were all untouched. At the kitchen window, I heard a breath behind me. Furious, I whirled around and kicked. A grunt sounded as a figure in the shadows doubled over. A second set of footsteps came running, and I turned to strike, but a strong hand gripped my wrist right before I connected.

I looked up at a king with giant's blood in his veins. I used my free hand to punch him in the groin.

For a half-second, Brendan spluttered, then he managed to say in an amused tone, "Good reflexes."

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"Cara." He pulled me closer to him. "Now is this the way to say hello to old friends?"

"I'll let you know when I see one," I whispered.

He looked over my shoulder. "Leave," he told someone I couldn't see.

"What do you want, Brendan?" I backed out of his grasp. "And make it quick."

"You," he said with a grin, brushing my fringe away from my forehead.

"Oh, quit messing around," I snapped.

His presence unsettled me. I had forgotten how tall and imposing he was, how overly familiar he behaved. He acted as though no time at all had passed since we'd last seen each other. And a part of me, one that I kept hoping would die, ached to lean into his faery touch and ease the emptiness, just for a little while.

He studied me for a moment. "You've changed."

"I changed the day you left me behind with a psycho faery."

"I did the best I could. Did you expect me to start a war for you? Was that what you wanted? To die in the midst of a rescue mission? We sent you Dubh. We gave you Anya. We waited for you to come to us, but strangers came instead. You gave your escape to a Darksider lady and her child."

"I had to help them, Brendan. And I was pregnant! You try riding a big-arse faery horse when you're in labour! I gave birth in a scruffy forest because of you."

His smile returned. "That's said to be lucky. And you survived. The child survived. Why are you so angry?"

I took a step back. I would always be angry. Anger protected me. "I'll try this again," I said flatly. "Why are you here?"

"We need you, preferably back in the faery realm where we can protect you without dividing our strength. Sadler's put a price on your head. There have been incidents. Faeries are looking for you, and we won't always be there to stop them. He wants the child." He glanced at the house. "And he doesn't care who brings her to him. She's in danger from anyone seeking Sadler's reward or his favour."

"He's always wanted my child. What's new? He's not going to risk his kingdom for a baby."

"He doesn't have to. Plenty of faeries want what he will pay. You should have killed him when you had the chance."

"I have enough blood on my hands to last me a lifetime."

"I'm serious, Cara. Things are changing on our side. You're not safe here anymore."

I looked into Brendan's eyes and saw that he was genuinely worried. That gave me the upper hand. "I'll take my chances," I said and headed back into the house. He didn't follow.

Inside, the others were waiting, still on edge, even though I was certain Bekind had told them there was no intruder.

"Brendan's here." I took Scarlet from Anya and held her on my lap as I sat at the table. "He wants us to go back."

Anya bit on her thumbnail. "When do we leave?"

"I said no."

They stood around, looking at each other. Scarlet struggled to pick up a pea from my plate, oblivious to the atmosphere.

"Cara, they won't leave you alone," Bekind said.

"I know," I said. "Apparently, Sadler's after Scarlet. He's hiring out this time. It'll take them a while, but they'll find us eventually."

"Then what do you plan to do?" Granddad asked.

"I plan on waiting for the truth."

"What are you talking about?" Anya demanded. "Scarlet is at risk."

"Something else is going on," I said. "They're just pretending it's to keep me safe."

"She's right," Brendan said from the doorway, making everyone jump. "It's true that Sadler wants the child, that he wants Cara dead, but there's a bigger story. And I have a plan." He looked at me. "This time, I promise you I have a plan."

Gran scurried from the stove back to the table, serving food to Brendan.

"Gran, stop it," I said.

"It's not often we have a faery king at our table. I don't want him going back home thinking we don't know how to look after guests."

I rolled my eyes. My night had turned into something ridiculous. "He's not a guest. He's uninvited."

"I thank you for your hospitality," Brendan told Gran. She pretty much simpered.

Granddad glared at him. "Are you the one?"

Brendan smothered a laugh. "I've been called _the one_ many a time, but in this case, I'm not so sure to what you're referring."

"Are you the father?" Granddad ground out.

Brendan leaned back in his chair. "That, I am not."

"Good. He isn't welcome in my house."

Bekind sat next to me. "Speak, Brendan. Tell her what you want."

His lips quirked upward. "I'll tell her why I am here." He glanced at Scarlet. "Her eyes are... unusual."

I scowled. "That's what happens when kings leave pregnant humans stranded in the Darkside. _Twice_."

For a moment, Brendan looked as though he were at a loss for words.

"Is Arlen here?" Anya asked hesitantly.

"No," Brendan said. "I need him at court. I need you all to return. We can't be divided, or Sadler will win it all."

"Just spit it out." I set Scarlet on the floor. She made an immediate beeline for Brendan. "And hurry up. It's way past her bedtime."

"The Darkside is growing, and with it, Sadler's armies."

"It's always grown," Bekind said.

"This is different." He bowed his head. "I believe we must have widened the rift when you came to the Fade for me. It's the only way to explain the blight. It stretches past the Darkside and across other borders. Tribes have vanished. Some believe they've been murdered, others that they've been lost to some kind of plague."

"Sadler likes his subjects to stay close to home," I said. "And once a Darksider, always a Darksider, right? I mean, your people just left the Darksiders to rot."

"That's not my plan," Brendan said. "But we need to act soon. Sadler's armies are guarding his castle, but he has a group of raiders causing havoc throughout the realm. The fear of the Darksiders has grown exponentially, and I'm afraid that war is imminent."

"You never wanted war," I said.

"No, but there's a second king who isn't in agreement. We are currently at a standoff. Your appearance might give my stance some weight." He held my gaze. "My people are already panicking. And if Sadler dies, the mayhem will worsen. Your child is seen by the Darksiders as their heir. If she makes an appearance, they might be convinced to stop attacking the rest of the realm. They might agree to peace. This blight will cause a famine, Cara, and it will affect all of us, no matter who is in power. It's our biggest problem, but Sadler is our most pressing one. You need to return before the raiders come looking for you."

"You want me to bring Scarlet back to the very place we ran from? Are you crazy?"

"We need her." A slow smile spread across his face as she tugged at his trouser leg. He lifted her onto his knee, apparently not noticing when she gripped his hair and tugged. "The Darksiders might negotiate, and our people would stop panicking. She's still my heir, remember. She could save the realm."

"She's a baby." I glanced at Bekind and shook my head. "This is ridiculous. Sadler has a piss-poor army. He doesn't stand a chance against you and Drake."

"His army will grow with the Darkside. A war will ruin us. And Drake is... unpredictable." Brendan frowned. "Do you know how many faeries will die if a true war comes?"

"Do I care?" I couldn't hold his gaze. I _did_ care, and I hated that I did. "They'll all get what they deserve in the end."

"Cara," Anya said in a soft voice, "they'll all die in the castle. The refugees outside, the tribes scattered across the Darkside, they'll be the first to die."

I stared at her. "What are you saying? Do you think I should take Scarlet to Sadler? Use her as a freaking sacrifice to stop his bloody war?"

"No. I'm saying you need to be prepared for the deaths that will come. Deaths no one can stop. And death will bring danger our way."

I squeezed my eyes shut as flashes of the mirror came to me—my skin darkened with the taint and my hands dripping with blood. The mirror knew all. Not only the Darksiders would die. I looked at Brendan. "Kill Sadler. He has to die."

"Then the Darkside will be consumed with chaos. His court is unruly, and the people are—"

" _Unruly_?" I scoffed. "His court is terrified of the madman in charge. Half of the people in that building are Deorad's offspring. They're related to my daughter, to Drake. They're suffering, too."

"And they will die in the event of war," Brendan said. "I never wanted war, but my court is being dragged into it anyway. I have asked for your help too many times, I know, but there are three kings with different views on the realm. This one little girl who has connections to all three could help us." He held my gaze. "And I already know you could."

"I'll think about it." I got up and plucked Scarlet from the king's arms. "Now can you please leave?"

He rose to his feet, towering over me. "When may I return?"

I avoided his eyes, suddenly nervous. "Now you're asking permission to visit?"

"I wouldn't have come if I wasn't desperate," he said in a low voice. "Drake wants us to expand into the Darkside, but his methods will result in many deaths. We plan on dividing the Darkside between us eventually, but not through war. I didn't lie when I told you I wished for peace. I've seen what a lust for power can do. I've learned my lessons, Cara." He brushed his thumb across my cheek. "Almost all of them." He cleared his throat and stepped back. "I'll return in three days. Be ready to leave with us or be ready to flee. Sadler's people won't be long in following. You're no longer safe here." He gave a half-bow and strode out of the room.

I looked at my grandfather. He had been listening closely. His frown deepened when he caught my eye.

"I'll make sure he leaves," Bekind said then transformed and ran out on four legs.

I sank into my chair, holding my daughter close to my chest. I couldn't let her go, couldn't let the fae take her, but they would keep coming, and they wouldn't have any qualms about taking her over my dead body. I blew out a shaky breath. Being around Brendan had unsettled me. He had power I couldn't dream of; his requesting permission was a gift. He could take without asking.

When Bekind returned and assured us that Brendan had actually left, Gran made a fresh pot of tea. I shook my head at the cup she offered me. My hands refused to stop shaking, but Scarlet had still dozed off in my arms.

"Well," I said, "what does everyone think?"

"They won't harm Scarlet," Bekind said. "If the Darksiders truly see her as their heir, they won't stand by and allow Sadler to harm her. Perhaps if the people put enough pressure on him, he will step down peacefully."

"We're talking about Sadler. He's obsessed." I glanced at my daughter's sleeping face. "He could have other children. Why hasn't he fathered more? He would lose whatever leverage he thinks Scarlet has over the other courts, but why not have a real heir of his own?"

"Deorad was his one and only, and we all know how that turned out." Bekind reached out and brushed Scarlet's hair out of her face. "I believe he lost the stomach for siring more heirs." She frowned. "Or perhaps his excesses in the human realm lost him the ability."

"You can't let him take her." Anya's fingers opened and closed as though she were itching to yank my daughter out of my arms. "You _can't_."

"I wasn't even considering that." I frowned. "I'm thinking about how far we can run with Scarlet."

Anya's eyes widened with surprise. "You would turn down Brendan?"

I looked down at my daughter. "We need to keep out of the mess between the courts. We'll only get swallowed up in their politics."

"And those who live in Chaos? How will they fare if you run?" Bekind asked.

"Do you care?" I asked.

"I worry that your guilt would consume you, so yes, I do care. But we are playing with lives and listening to those who willingly deceive to get what they want. Who do you trust?"

"He sounded concerned," Granddad said. "He sounded like he spoke the truth. He's worried about both of these other kings, not just the one."

"I know." I held Scarlet a little closer as my eyes filled with tears. "I'm not going to run. _You_ all are."

"Cara, what are you talking about?" Gran asked.

"I'm going to go with Brendan. I don't have a choice. It's possible..." I took a deep breath. "It's possible I can do something." I glanced at the rings on my finger. "I'm still married to a king, technically. By the end, a lot of the Darksiders were actually nice to me."

"They won't listen to you," Anya said.

"But they'll stop looking for me in the human realm. They don't know Scarlet. They won't know where to look for her. There has to be a way to hide her from them long-term. In the meantime, my presence in the faery realm might be enough of a distraction, and the more favours I do, the more favours I'm owed. We could make Scarlet untouchable if I play this right." I held Bekind's gaze, seeing her acceptance. "We could spread word that she's with me, when really, the rest of you will be getting a head-start."

Gran touched my arm. "You would leave her?"

I gazed down at my sleeping daughter. "I would do _anything_ to keep her safe, Gran. Whatever it takes."

She squeezed. "You have to keep yourself safe, too. She needs her mother."

"I know." I brushed away a stray tear. "I'm going to put Scarlet to bed."

"I'll do it," Anya said.

"No." I breathed through clenched teeth. "She's _my_ daughter. I want to be alone with her for a bit."

I left them in the kitchen and headed upstairs. Scarlet made a whimpering sound that made my stomach do a flip. My mother had withheld her love to protect me from her husband. I would abandon my daughter to protect her from mine. Life was unfair, but I intended to even the odds. My real plan, the one I would keep close to my chest, was to get close to Sadler. I would finish what I started, and the other kings would be so relieved that they'd give me anything I wanted. Scarlet would be safe. All I had to do was raise the courage to go through with facing Sadler once and for all.

I wasn't surprised to see Vix sprawled out on my bed when I walked into the bedroom. I had been sensing her miserable presence for a while now.

I walked over and laid Scarlet in her cot before speaking. "So he let you out of the dungeon."

"He needed me." She flung a dagger in the air and caught it as it fell. "And I need you."

"There's a queue. What are you doing here, Vix?"

"Perhaps I'm here to steal back what belongs to the Chaos Court." She looked at my bejewelled fingers. "Interesting."

"If you were going to take Scarlet, you would have done it any of those other times you've been hanging around this place."

She looked momentarily startled. "You didn't give a thing away. I'm impressed, human."

I sat on the bed and held her dark gaze. "What do you want?"

"We're all going to die. If my king was unstable before, he's lost his mind now to face off against two armies. We'll hold them off for a time, but ultimately, most of us will die."

"How is he alive? He looked as though he was dying when I left."

Her face fell. "The doctor returned from the hole he had been hiding in. He was just in time, as it turns out. What was done to Deorad is being done to others. Sadler makes no secret of that now. But none are as strong, so he keeps adding more. There are two dozen missing fae, all of them blood of Deorad. Most of us aren't allowed on the upper floors anymore, so I have no doubt the doctor's running his experiments there." She rose and crossed the room to the cot. "I don't sense the taint in her. She escaped from that, too?"

"Kind of. One eye is... different. But she's fine otherwise."

"She's able to withstand the poison," she said as if talking to herself. She looked up at me. "You know this will be seen as another miracle."

"It won't be seen at all. I can't let him near her. Not ever."

"You're right. He believes she alone, apart from the Silver King, will be able to withstand the doctor's magic. He wishes to use her to sustain himself." She glanced at the cot again. "He may be right. She's not like the other children."

"She's not Deorad's," I reminded her. "And she was born in neutral territory."

"Still. You should be careful. He's reaching out, trying to kill all of the birds with a mountain. You destroyed what sustained him, embarrassed him, and even managed to turn some of his court against him. He despises you, and he will seek his revenge. A quick death would be lucky."

"What are you doing, warning me?"

She shrugged. "You made a difference to us. You blunted his edge, made him consider his actions."

"He killed people for no reason while I was next to him, Vix."

"It could have been worse. You tempered him somehow. It was as if you had a kind of power over him. And the court itself changed. Colour returned. Food came. _Hope_. And that flower grows in the gardens no matter how many times Sadler tries to destroy it. You made your mark. You must return."

"To die?"

"To save us. The Silver King is unlikely to war on his own daughter, and the child is still the Green King's heir. If you have their protection, then so do we. The Darksiders believe in you, think you are blessed. Whether it's true or not, I don't care. If Sadler pursues this war, _we_ will die. Darksiders fled in droves after you escaped, but they, too, will die when the other armies come for us. The Darkside is dying. Perhaps the entire realm is dying, but you understand the kings. You could sway them."

"Are you asking me for help?"

"I believe I'm desperate."

"What are you not telling me, Vix?"

She blew out a breath, her expression changing to one of relief. "The court is truly in Chaos. Sadler no longer attends to his duties. He spends his days locked in the tower room with the doctor. He keeps telling us that help will join us soon. I fear he has made a deal of some kind, that someone is coming."

"Like who?"

"The doctor's people, perhaps. He's a terrible creature who doesn't belong in our land. Rat overheard mention of a fleet of ships."

"Reinforcements from across the water?"

"Nothing good comes from across the water. It's a mistake. We must save Sadler from himself," she whispered. "For all our sakes."

# Chapter 3

I called in sick at work and refused to let Scarlet out of my sight. Whatever was happening in the faery realm, all sides were desperate for a child to change the tide. Brendan might have assumed that Scarlet would make a positive difference, but I dreaded what would happen if Sadler got his hands on my daughter. The thought of her being kept as Deorad had been sickened me. I had to make sure Scarlet stayed out of his reach. I had allowed the fae to use me, but I would do whatever I could to save Scarlet from the same fate.

My grandparents, Zoe, Bekind, and Anya gathered in the living room with me. Scarlet slept in my arms. We had spent the last few days discussing our options, over and over again. I hadn't told any of them that a Darksider had been in the house. Vix had said she couldn't sense the taint from Scarlet. I wondered whether that meant we had escaped in time or if Scarlet was somehow immune. I had to find out more, and the only place I could do that was in the faery realm.

"You must be crazy," Zoe said. "You can't go back there, Cara. Not after everything you told me."

I could tell by her worried expression that she feared I wouldn't be able to handle it. But I had unfinished business, and I needed Sadler's shadow to lift off my shoulders. "If I do, Scarlet will be safe for a little longer. I have a plan. I know what I'm doing. And this is going to end."

Bekind stared at me. "I hope you understand the stakes."

"I do." I held Scarlet a little tighter. "I understand everything."

"Fine," Zoe said. "I'll go with Scarlet."

"What?" Anya scowled. _"I'll_ be taking Scarlet."

"Actually," I said, "I need all of you to take care of Scarlet for me. If I don't return... she'll need every one of you."

"Of course we'll take care of her," Gran said.

"You can't go on the run," I told Gran. "You two need to stay here and reconnect with my mother. She needs you, whether she wants to admit it or not. And you need your daughter back. You can't get involved in the faery stuff."

"I was born involved," Granddad reminded me. He might have come from Bekind and the leanan sídhe's bloodlines, but he had escaped unharmed. He had told me his stories, but they sounded like adventures rather than the terror I had experienced as a child. Perhaps it was different for the women in the family. Or maybe he'd just had better luck.

"The fae involved me at every turn," I said. "I have to see this out. If I don't..." I shook my head, unwilling to share my deepest worries.

"You have it all worked out," Bekind said in a cold voice. "Walk right into danger and forget everything else. Good plan, Cara."

I glared at her. "Stop it. This is going to be hard enough. I have nobody on my side this time. I have to miss out on my daughter for who knows how long. And I have to be around people I—" I lowered my head for a moment. "They won't leave us alone unless I do something. You know that. If this works out, we could all be free. Forever. Bekind, look me in the eye and tell me you have any other plan that can do that."

The clock chimed. It had been exactly three days since Brendan first appeared. I couldn't see a way out. I had to be cold-hearted, I had to abandon my child, and I had to instigate the murder of yet another one of her blood relatives. I needed to set us free. _I_ was desperate and sick of looking over my shoulder.

Bekind shuddered. "He's here."

I kissed Scarlet and handed her to Zoe. Anya slipped her hand into mine and walked outside with me. In the yard, Brendan was waiting with Arlen. The warrior was almost as large as Brendan, over six feet tall, and the massive broadsword at his waist probably weighed more than I did. He appeared as stern as always until he saw Anya. The look he gave her softened his features, and for an instant, I caught a glimpse of the man behind the duty.

Anya squealed and ran to him. He lifted her off the ground with ease and just gazed at her for a long moment. My breath hitched at their reunion. They would have married ages ago but for me.

I caught Brendan looking at me expectantly. "You're not taking my daughter," I said then held up my hand when he made to interrupt. "I'm going in her place. In the meantime, we can pretend she's with us, but if you get me in front of the Darksider army, I'll talk to them. I'll talk to Sadler, too. I'll do whatever it takes, but Scarlet is _not_ going to the faery realm. She's not going near the Darkside."

"Will they listen?" Brendan asked.

"Only one way to find out."

"I'm staying," Anya said.

"What?" Arlen sounded furious as he set her down.

"She needs me," Anya said stubbornly. "And I need to keep Scarlet safe."

Arlen scowled. "But she's just a human."

Anya stepped back and folded her arms. "And I'm _just_ a pixie. Has that ever made a difference to Cara? She's blessed by the Mother. She's been chosen for something. And Scarlet grew in the womb in the Darkside. Do you know how children in the Darkside end up? But not Scarlet. She's special, and I have to—"

Arlen grabbed her arm. "You're coming back with me."

She yanked her arm from his grasp. "I'm _free._ " She turned on her heel and stormed back inside.

I fidgeted nervously, embarrassed. I felt Arlen's angry gaze on me.

"Return," Brendan told him. "Make preparations."

Arlen gave me one last glare before stomping off.

Brendan looked down at me. "He wouldn't harm you."

"Not really the point. I've been the cause of everything bad. He's not going to forgive me so easily."

"Bring your daughter and Anya, then. I'll protect her from Sadler."

I gave a weary shake of my head. "I'm not being a bitch, but I've heard all that before. You couldn't help us out of fear of starting a war, and now one has come anyway."

"Cara, I'm—" He froze and pulled me close to him, putting his free hand on his sword.

"I mean no harm," Líle called from the shadows. "I knew you left the faery realm and that you would come to Cara. I need to speak with her. That's all."

Brendan bristled. "On Drake's orders?"

"I'm a free fae, and I won't work for Death. You should know this. I came alone, for... me. May I speak with her?"

"I want to," I said.

Brendan hesitated then nodded. "I'll be nearby."

"I'll be quick." Tears filled my eyes. "I just need to say goodbye to my daughter."

"You love her," he said as if that were something odd.

"She's my baby."

He vanished, and Líle approached me slowly, her expression grim. Her eyes and veins were still ash grey, and the colour of her normally fiery hair had dulled. She hadn't recovered, even after so much time.

I wasn't sure how to speak to her anymore, how to get through to the person looking at me as if I were a stranger. "What's up?"

"I owe you a debt."

"You don't owe me a thing," I said. "You helped me."

"I only live because of you. I'm only free because of you. And the fact that you still live is just a testament to our Mother's influence. I owe you, Cara Kelly, and I want to be free of this debt. I will kill her for you."

"What?"

"I told you once that I would kill Sorcha if you asked me to. Just say the word, and she will die."

I took a step back. "What are you on about?"

"If she dies, Drake is free to... follow his heart. Your child would be safe. You would be safe. You could find what you've been looking for. All it takes is the banshee's death."

A million possible scenarios ran through my mind. "No," I said. "I can't..."

"She tried to kill you once. What if that happens again?"

I straightened. "Then I'll fight back. But I don't want you to assassinate your queen just so I can... I can't ask you for this, Líle."

She looked anguished. "But I owe you. I can't be indebted to you any longer. I can't bear it."

I bit my lip. "Do you really need to end ties with me?"

"Yes! I wish to be free of all debts. I'm no longer the person you knew. I... it's only a matter of time before my life ends. I wish to clear my slate first."

Was she contemplating suicide? "Okay," I said, desperately trying to think of something that would prolong her life rather than end it. "I have something I need from you."

"What is it?" she asked eagerly. "Ask, and it will be done."

"Go with my daughter," I said. "Protect her for me. I might die this time, and I really need to know she's safe."

"You trust me with her life?"

I reached out and took her hand. "I _know_ you'll keep her safe."

She stared at our joined hands. "I will honour this request. I vow my life to your daughter's safety. But Cara...." She caught my eye, and I saw a flicker of her old self in there. "Be careful."

I gave her a weak smile. "Always."

"When do we leave?"

"I'm going with Brendan after I say my goodbyes. You'll leave with the others as soon as you can. Zoe, Bekind, and Anya will be with you."

"You should break the news to Anya first," Líle said with a wry smile. "She's not so fond of me anymore."

"I'll deal with Anya. You just be prepared to kick some faery arse whenever necessary. And when all of this is over, I'll see you again."

I hugged her then went inside and began my goodbyes. My grandparents hugged me.

"We'll miss you," Gran said.

"You'll see us all again. Someday, things will be different." I hoped I sounded as though I believed it.

"Should I wake Scarlet?" Zoe asked.

"Let her sleep. I can't watch her watch me leave, you know?"

"I'm going to take care of her," Zoe said. "Auntie Zoe, remember?"

"I know you will. I can't know where you're taking her, just in case, but be gone by morning. Make arrangements to travel tonight. Once I leave, I can't guarantee... anything. Líle's going with you. She's going to help protect Scarlet. She's a warrior, so listen to her, okay? Especially you, Anya."

Anya scowled. "I won't take orders from that traitor."

"Yeah, you will," I said. "Or you can go back to Arlen and be happy for a change." I pressed my finger against her lips to stop her from further protests. "You're a miserable bitch without him, so I'm going to do my best to sort this whole thing out. Then you can get back together and do the wedding thing and be happy."

"But Scarlet—"

"Arlen needs you, too. When I get back to Scarlet, you're going home."

I took Bekind aside. "Will you stay with them?"

"She's my kin, too," Bekind said. "I'm compelled to watch over her."

I hugged her. "I love you, cat-lady."

She reluctantly patted my back then pulled out of my grasp.

I did my best not to cry as I leaned over my daughter and breathed in her scent one last time. She stirred in Zoe's arms, so I pressed my lips against her forehead and turned away before I lost my nerve. I already had my things: my dagger in my boot and my fear in my heart. I draped my old, tattered cloak around my shoulders. Leaving Scarlet would break my heart, but keeping her safe was priceless.

I moved toward the door. "I have to go." And I stepped outside without a second glance.

Seconds later, Brendan slipped his fingers around mine as we walked away from the house. "We're going a different way in case anyone follows."

"Líle's staying," I said.

"I'm surprised."

I glanced up at him. "She's repaying a debt."

"As you say."

"She offered to kill Sorcha for me."

He stared at me. "Never say that aloud again unless you want Líle to die, Cara."

"I know. I asked her to watch over Scarlet instead." My fingers tightened around his. "I'm scared to go back."

"It'll be like you never left."

"Don't leave me behind this time."

He made a strange sound. "You won't be alone again."

He ducked under a tree branch as we exited my grandparents' garden and entered the fae realm. For a moment, I froze, overwhelmed by the sensations and memories. The lilac moon cast a luminescent glow over the meadow we stood in.

"This is it," he whispered. "Are you ready?"

"Nope. Let's go."

We walked until we came to the private place Brendan had taken me once before. In the distance, I saw the Hollows and shivered. They were even more imposing than I remembered.

Brendan led me under the willow tree and stopped to tighten the cloak around my face. He pressed his finger against my lips. "Do _not_ speak, even if asked a question. I have a decoy carriage on its way to the castle. For now, you'll stay with me and be a part of the war councils. When the right opportunity comes, we'll meet with the Darksiders and hope they see sense."

He cocked his head to the side as if listening for something then pulled me behind the tree. He kicked a root, and as though a spring released, a huge rock rose off the ground. I gasped when a secret passageway was revealed. He took a step down then turned to help me. We descended some stone stairs, and the rock closed above us. For a moment, the blackest black surrounded us. I clung to Brendan, feeling a sense of vertigo. I soon realised that we were spinning, but I had no idea how or what was happening.

"Almost there," he murmured.

My heart raced. So many secrets. Finally, the sensation ended, and a light flickered in front of us. I could plainly see that we were in some kind of tunnel, but I couldn't tell how far we would have to walk. Brendan silently led the way. As soon as his foot stepped into shadow, the light extinguished, and another lit up in front of us. When I glanced over my shoulder, I saw nothing, and it reminded me of my first night with the fae, when the darkness had appeared to chase me. I sped up, just in case.

After a while, I heard voices and footsteps. I hesitated, but Brendan urged me on. We reached the end of the tunnel, and all of the lights extinguished. Brendan took my hand and laid my palm against the surface of the wall. In the corner was a lever.

"With me," he whispered against my ear. "Or only one shall pass."

We pulled the lever together. I flinched at the resulting creaking sound, but Brendan seemed calm. Ahead, I spotted winding steps that curved upward. A pale flickering light filtered through from an opening somewhere above our heads. We headed up, almost blindly, but my eyes adjusted by the time we made it to the third flight.

On and on we walked until we came to a dead end. I touched the wall and found it was hot. When we pulled another lever, the wall opened to reveal Brendan's quarters in his castle. We stepped through his fireplace, and the secret passage closed behind us.

Brendan smiled as he brushed something off my face. "Soot," he whispered. "The carriage will arrive in a few hours. Until then, you must stay hidden within this room. If someone knocks while I'm gone, you need to hide. If you think we're being attacked, use the passageway. The third stone on the mantelpiece opens it again."

"You think we'll be attacked?" I squeaked.

"I will not let Sadler shame me a second time. I'm prepared for any event."

"He didn't shame you." I turned away.

He caught my arm and pulled me to him. "I swore to keep you and your child safe, and he almost killed you both in front of me. That is shame."

"He's mad. He doesn't even know what he's doing."

"But you beat him. You survived, and you escaped. Your child lived." He undid my cloak and took it from me. "Make yourself comfortable. Food will come soon."

I used a cloth he handed me to clean the grime from my face and hands.

He watched me closely. "You realise your daughter is still my heir."

"What does that mean now? I mean, with Sadler and everything else."

He held up my hand and fingered the black wedding band. "You are the queen of Chaos, and your daughter is a child of the same. She's a princess. They don't call her human. In your absence, they've half-forgotten that you're human, for that matter. And it wouldn't matter. Fae royalty have often used humans for breeding." He cleared his throat. "Not that that's what happened with you."

I blew out a breath. "So they talk about Scarlet?"

"And you. If you had heard the rumours about you when you were out of our reach... I dare not believe half of them."

I pulled away from him. "Maybe some are true."

"Tomorrow, you must meet with Fiadh. She's been asking about you every day."

"She's still here?"

He nodded. "Her child... I didn't see the Darkside while I was trapped in the Fade. I didn't quite realise the effect the taint had on the children. I must admit I feared that your daughter would be the same as Fiadh's child, but your girl seems completely clean."

With a sigh, I rolled up my sleeve, past the green and silver bracelet I never removed. "But _I'm_ not."

His eyes widened as he stared at the black veins in my arm. "Were you afflicted while pregnant?"

"No. This happened in the human realm."

"You think it's spreading there?"

"Maybe. You said we could have widened the rift, and the rift itself is close to the narrowest point between the realms. There could be all kinds of repercussions."

He brushed his thumb across my black veins. "Then it's more urgent than I suspected. How do you feel?"

"Okay. I mean, I've been kind of miserable, but that comes with working a boring office job with a pervy boss and knowing that I have to hide from the people I care about as much as the people who want me dead."

"But you're not sure if how you feel is because of your experiences or the taint?" He bowed his head and sniffed my skin. "I sense it under your skin. Something different." He straightened. "But it's not consuming you."

I tried to smile. "You mean, _yet_. Do you think Scarlet is immune to the taint? I know her eye is odd, but there's no misery in her at all. She's so happy that she makes everyone around her happier. Maybe, when I was pregnant, she kept me safe from it. Then when I gave birth, I became susceptible to it again."

"She's just a child."

"She's not like other children, Brendan."

He smiled. "Every mother believes the same."

"Her heritage isn't exactly normal. Did you know about Bekind? That I came from her, too?"

He nodded. "I suspected as much. It was a great scandal that Nella managed to brush off. Are you unhappy about it?"

"I'd rather say I was related to Bekind than Nella." I covered up my arm. "I saw this in the mirror, you know. Remember? The mirror in the Darkside that I told you and Drake about? It's real. I saw it again."

"How? Where?"

"Sadler had the mirror. He talked about making deals with a different god. He said he only took me because he saw us married in the mirror's reflection. He saw me twice and knew he had to do something about me."

"And what did you see this time?"

"Death." I sighed. "Only death."

"It sounds like we have a lot to talk about," he said.

"Yeah, we do, but I'm exhausted. Are Grim and Realtín around?"

"Even they don't know you're here. We'll keep it that way for this evening. Are you hungry?"

I shook my head. I was too sick with worry to think about food.

Brendan tipped my chin. "They will protect the girl."

"The girl. She has a name."

"I know. What made you pick that one?"

"It just seemed like the right name when I saw her." I shrugged. "They helped me escape, you know."

"Who did?"

"The Darksiders. Drake's half-siblings, to be exact. They were so loyal to Sadler, but they let me go."

"How strange."

"Not really. They're people, just like anyone else. Did the Miacha tell you everything?"

"I left the weapon with them, if that's what you mean."

"But did they tell you what I did with it?"

"You mean Deorad?" He nodded. "That was brave of you."

I removed the cloak. "No, I was stupid. I should have finished the job then and there."

"Sadler?"

"I had chances to kill him. I blinded him in one eye when I should have stabbed him through the heart. I let him age and ultimately use other fae, like he did with Deorad, when I should have stopped him."

"How do you know he went on to use other fae?"

"Um." _Shit_. "How else would he be alive? That doctor was on his way back. Sadler was losing it. I had to do something, but I didn't know enough."

"Who is the doctor?"

"I don't know his name. They just called him 'the doctor.' They also called him foreign, him and Bart, actually." It hurt to think of Bart. He had been kind when he wasn't being enigmatic. "They made it sound like he isn't from here. And he was using a shard of the mirror to... hurt me. So he knew about the mirror, knew how to wield it." I yawned. "I should sleep."

"Take my bed. I'll stay on the couch. In the morning, we'll reintroduce you to court."

I barely slept that night. My heart ached for my daughter, and my body screamed at me to run. I felt lost without Bekind and Anya. I had relied on them so much. And Scarlet... I couldn't stand to think of my daughter out there, running, without me. Tendrils of regret and doubt began to wind around my heart. Had I done the right thing? Ever?

But a small part of me felt content because I was back in the faery realm. I hated that part of me.

# Chapter 4

I awoke alone the next morning, and the loneliness hit me in the gut. Nothing in the room reminded me of my daughter, and somehow, that was worse. I blew out a shaky breath as I sat in front of the fire and touched the medals around my neck that had belonged to my brother. I hoped that from wherever the dead went when they moved on, he would be able to watch over Scarlet if everything went wrong. I shook my head and dropped the necklace. I _had_ to trust myself. I would fail if there was even the slightest doubt in my mind. Once I dealt with Sadler, our biggest threat would be gone, and I could ensure that Scarlet and I would be safe for the rest of our lives.

I sat and listened to the numerous footsteps in the hallways until Brendan opened the door a crack and slipped inside.

"Do you trust Fiadh?" he blurted as soon as he shut the door behind him.

"Fiadh?" I shrugged. "I barely know her. She would do anything for her son."

"It will look better if one of Sadler's subjects, especially one of such old lineage, is by your side."

"She came here because of me. I think her actions put her on our side."

"But are you willing to put your fate in her hands?"

I thought about the Darksider who had left her husband, her home, and her king, and had travelled to enemy territory because I told her it would help her son. "Yes. I think I would."

"Then she will be a part of this."

"Was the decoy carriage attacked?"

He relaxed and leaned against the door. "No."

"What does that tell us?"

"Honestly, it's hard to say. Either the right people didn't hear you and Scarlet were on the move, or they realised it wasn't true. I need to speak to Fiadh. I'll be back."

He stepped out of the room again for a few moments. When he returned, he looked less stressed. "I've sent for the Darksiders. We're going to keep up the charade that there is a child here for as long as possible. Fiadh will be your companion. When you're taking part in our war councils, she will take care of your child. Do you understand?"

"Yeah, okay. But there's something I have to tell you."

"What is it?" A knock sounded at the door. "Later, then."

He opened the door. A willowy ash-blonde stepped in first, her eyes widening when she saw me. Fiadh came over and knelt at my feet. Her protector, Conn, strode in, his massive wings sweeping across the floor. Tiny black feathers edged the wings, making him look like some kind of warrior angel.

He carried a young boy in his arms. Fiadh's son had grown in my absence. He was plumper, too, with the sharp lines of his face more rounded. His small features made him appear almost as feminine as the mother he so closely resembled. If it wasn't for the slate-grey veins creeping from his neck to his cheeks, he might have passed for a normal human boy. I knew that, under his clothing, his skin was covered in black growths, but the boy looked far more alert than he had the last time I had seen him.

"Sit," Brendan said. "And know this: if the truth of what is said in this room is spread, we all die. Do you understand, Fiadh?"

Fiadh glanced at me before nodding. "What's going on?"

I patted the seat next to me. "Sit. Tell me about your son. How you've all been. Glic was so pissed when you didn't come back. He got himself kicked out of court."

"He was always a fool." Fiadh smiled as she glanced at Conn and her son. "My boy is doing a lot better since we came here. He's growing in strength. The healers don't believe he'll walk again, but I still hope. I named him Setanta, hoping a strong name would protect him, but..." She shrugged, her eyes filling with tears.

"You should get him a wheelchair," I said. "He can still be mobile. He doesn't have to be carried everywhere by Conn. He needs other kids to play with."

"There is a lack of children around here," Fiadh said.

Brendan cleared his throat. "That's what we brought you here to talk about. Sadler is still hunting Cara's child. She's under protection."

"But the child is not here," Fiadh said slowly.

"No, but we need people to believe she is for as long as possible." Brendan leaned forward. "The best way to protect the realm is to keep the heir safe. The child needs to survive, and we need your help to protect her."

"Of course." Fiadh turned to me. "I owe you in so many ways. Mother to mother, this is something I willingly do for you and your child."

"Thanks," I whispered, half-afraid to look at Setanta. My daughter had been lucky to escape his fate.

"Can I ask?" Fiadh said hesitantly. "How is the child? Is she...?"

"She seems to be free of the taint," I said. "She has a black mark in her eye, but that's the only sign so far."

"When people hear..." She shivered. "This is a good sign."

"You think so?" I asked. "Will the Darksiders accept her?"

"They have no choice," she said in a harsh tone. "We have little else."

Conn looked at Brendan. "I take it we're allowed to stay, even though we haven't pledged to you."

Brendan's lips twitched. "I'll forgive the lapse in judgement. I want peace. The realm needs it in order to carry on existing. Cara will do what she can to help us. If a war between three kings erupts, none of us are safe. I expect loyalty in this matter, make no mistake, but I am less interested in fealty of late. Some problems are far more important than taking sides."

"We are loyal to our queen," Fiadh said firmly.

Brendan grinned. My stomach did a little flip at how familiar the expression was, at how much I had missed it.

"Of that, I have no doubt." He clapped his hands. "Now. There will be a war council later this evening. You, Fiadh, and Conn, are to take charge of Scarlet whilst we are otherwise engaged."

"The deception won't last forever," Conn said, his long hair falling into his eyes.

"Nothing does," Brendan said. "But the longer it lasts, the safer the child will be. You understand that a war is coming, that Sadler will risk everything to break any kind of peace I wish to pledge for."

Conn nodded. "I know the kind of man he is. And I'm learning the kind of men the other kings are. I won't fight for your army against my own kind. You understand that?"

"You have your own loyalties," Brendan said. "And if war should come, you three should not be found in my court, for your own sakes."

"We're agreed on all accounts." Fiadh rose to her feet. "I look forward to seeing your child someday, my lady. She brings me hope that the Darkside is not the death sentence we assumed it to be."

I reached out and took her hand. "Thank you for doing this."

She nodded and squeezed my fingers. "It's the least we can do after everything you did for us."

I smiled. "Thanks for sending the plants and herbs back to court. Who knows? Maybe they've helped already."

"That was all the Miacha. One stayed with us for a while. She comes back every couple of weeks to check on Setanta and to bring new medicines. She is determined to cure him. We were lucky to have met you."

I tried to keep a smile on my face as she left. Luck, good or bad, had changed my entire life.

I fidgeted while Brendan prepared for the war council. He had been worried all day, but he was slowly rebuilding his mask, the one he showed to everyone else.

"Should I really go with you to this?" I asked.

He stoked the fire. Despite the time of year in the human realm, the weather in the faery world was absolutely miserable. "I think it's time you reappeared. We need to make a decision, one way or another. I'm sorry it's gone this far, that everything seems to propel us further into madness, but I can't ignore Sadler's actions any longer." He turned to look at me. "Neither can you."

"Is there anything we can do to stop this war?"

He went back to work on the fire. "End Sadler's life. But it looks as though he's not so easy to kill. Some want to send an envoy to pledge for peace, only to include an assassin."

"How will you feel about that?"

He sat on a chair and leaned forward, his gaze on the flickering flames in the hearth. "I'm not entirely sure."

"The Darkside would need a leader."

His eyes gleamed. "If we divided up the land, I would regain some of what I inherited as a younger man. I can't say I'm opposed, but trickery and murder are what keep the old ways alive. Sadler's reign must end, and not a one of us can figure out a way to avoid bloodshed in order to do it." He nodded at me. "Except you."

My cheeks burned. I _wanted_ Sadler to die. I was convinced that I needed that closure or I would end up as twisted as Ronnie. "He's not giving us a lot of choice. But the Darksiders had started to turn on him when I was at court. Maybe they'll make the decision for themselves."

"Even if they do, we have other problems."

"Like what?"

He gave me a wry smile and rose to his feet again. "You'll likely gather that for yourself at the war council."

"Who all will be there?"

"Grim, Realtín, Arlen, Drake, Sorcha, and Dymphna, at first. Others will join us later. Important people who can help us."

"But ones you don't trust."

With a smirk, he bowed low. "You have the way of it, Queen Cara."

"Oh, shut the fuck up."

He laughed. "And she's back."

"Do any of them know I'm here?"

"I doubt Drake and his people know yet. I've been avoiding Grim and the sprite to keep the secret a little longer."

"Evil."

"I hope not." He sighed as he struggled to button the sleeves of his shirt.

I moved to help him. He stood still and allowed it. His hands were large and calloused, his fingers too clumsy and impatient for something as tiny as a button.

When I finished, I realised he had been staring at me. "What?"

"You've changed. Something about you is very different."

"Everything about me is different." My heartbeat quickened as I looked into his startlingly green eyes. "I'll never be the same again."

"I'm sorry."

"I believe you." I started to move away.

He held my wrist. "But you don't forgive me?"

I pressed my lips together. Having a conversation about what had happened to me would just release the anger I had kept shut away for so long. And Brendan wasn't the one I wanted to unleash my venom on. I couldn't make an enemy of him. He was the strongest card in my deck. A clock chimed in the corner, saving me from having to respond.

"It's time," he said, sounding weary. "Come. We'll be there first. Be sure to watch the reactions." He led me down a set of back stairs that were conspicuously empty. "Are you nervous?"

"Yes."

"What do you have to be nervous of? You're a queen, remember?"

"In name only," I whispered. I froze to the spot as my lungs constricted. "This will be the first time I've seen him since..."

Brendan lowered his voice. "You will hold your head up high. You will not let your pain show."

"Is that what the fae do?"

"That's what royals do." He kissed the top of my head. "And it's how you get through the first time you see somebody you still love after a long time apart."

I didn't correct him. I wasn't sure how I felt about anyone anymore. I loved Scarlet, and nobody else existed who came close to that love, so maybe what I felt for Drake didn't mean a thing. Time had twisted my feelings, and I wasn't entirely sure what those feelings had become.

We made it into Brendan's new office unseen. A long table surrounded by chairs stood in the centre of the room.

"Sit next to me," he said, taking a seat at the head of the table. "And watch the door."

"What am I?" I asked, pulling out a chair. "How do the fae see me now?"

"As the mother of a faery," he said. "As the queen of the Darksiders. As someone they need to watch. You have gone from the entertaining human to... the woman who entered the Fade to bring me home, the woman who helped two kings gain their kingdoms, the woman who survived Sadler's torture and changed the Dark Court."

"Somebody's been exaggerating," I said with a short laugh. "So Scarlet is a faery, even though I'm not?"

"Fae is fae. The daughter of a faery king and heir to the thrones of others must be a faery. I do admit that I'm curious about what she inherited. I shared Drake's body when she was conceived; therefore, he held my power in his hands. And now we both have so much more. She survived so much, so soon."

"When she was born, the Miacha said that she had been protected, that magic surrounded her." I blinked away tears. "She would have died otherwise. I heard Sorcha say she sensed death back in Sadler's castle. When you all were there. When Sadler..." I shook my head. "Who's protecting her?"

"Perhaps you did," he said, but he looked uncomfortable.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I'm just... remembering that day in Sadler's court. For a moment, I thought you would both die. A soldier carried you out and promised to protect you."

"Rumble," I said. "It was Rumble. He was one of Deorad's children. His face is ruined. He told me that was what Sadler did to loyalty, so imagine what would happen if I betrayed him."

"You blinded Sadler and lived," he said with a smile. "You were clawed by the fenris and lived, too, remember? And you escaped from the Chaos Court after killing Deorad, one of the most feared creatures in this realm."

My cheeks burned. "I didn't do it for... I kind of did it out of pity, Brendan. I put him out of his misery. I wanted Drake to get over his vendetta, but Deorad was tortured every night, kept alive, barely, by some kind of black magic. And I know he deserved it after everything he did. I know I should have hated him, but it wasn't like that when it came down to it."

"And once again, you manage to surprise me. I'm not the only one who is fascinated by your unpredictability, Cara. I told you that you have a knack for survival. The rumours about you have flown around this realm like wildfire. Even while you were hiding in the human realm, stories were being whispered." He gazed at me. "I still wonder how many are true."

Footsteps sounded outside the door. Under the table, Brendan slipped his hand around mine and squeezed. "Don't stand when they enter," he said. "You're on equal footing now. Don't let anyone in any court treat you as anything less than a queen. Never give them any ground. Trust me on this."

Drake and Sorcha stepped into the room. Everything about him, from his silver-threaded veins to his aquiline nose and thin-lipped mouth, made him appear cold and indifferent. The banshee's disdainful air was a perfect match.

Sorcha's breath hitched when she spotted me. She plastered over her confusion with a brief smile.

Drake took one look at me, dropped his wife's arm, and glared at Brendan. "What the hell are you doing?"

Brendan gave him a lazy smile and casually draped an arm around my chair. "Whatever it takes."

Dymphna came in next with Arlen, who had obviously not cheered up since I'd last seen him. A golden bright spark hovered over their heads. Realtín flew straight into my arms, making weird little noises. I held her close, my eyes welling with unshed tears at the genuine declaration of love from a sprite who preferred mischief over anything else. Still holding her, I rose to my feet when I caught sight of Grim.

"Cara," he whispered.

I walked over and knelt to hug him, and something in my heart sang out that I was home. I felt about a hundred times safer with Grim around to warn me of danger. He and Realtín had been one of my first links to the fae world. They were unwaveringly loyal to me without expecting anything in return.

"Close the door," Brendan said. "We don't have much time before the others arrive."

Arlen moved to shut the door then sat on Brendan's other side. By the time everyone had taken their seats, Realtín's violent shudders had abated, and she only occasionally trembled.

I sneaked glances around the room. Drake was barely containing his anger. His expression was haughty, as if he had never smiled in his life. We had conceived a child together, yet he couldn't even look in my direction. The tension in the air increased, and I shifted in my seat. I worried Brendan's plan had been a mistake.

"So you're back." Sorcha gazed at my stomach for a moment. "And the child?"

"Safe," Brendan said.

"Maybe Eithne could be another playmate," I said to Brendan before turning to Dymphna. "Is she here?"

The daoine sídhe nodded, but she looked confused. "My daughter is with us."

"Good idea," Brendan said. "I asked Cara to bring Scarlet to us. I thought to use her as a bargaining tool. I doubted the Darksiders would attack us with their heir in the castle. But Cara had a different plan. She sent her daughter into hiding and came without her. She wants to talk to the Darksiders, to persuade them to back down from this fight."

"You're a fool," Drake said. "They won't listen to _her_. She's barely a consort. She has no power over Sadler."

"She has the child," Brendan said coolly. "And there are Darksiders in this very castle."

Drake harrumphed. "Which I don't agree with."

Ignoring the interruption, Brendan continued, "After seeing their reaction to someone they call their queen, I believe Cara can make a difference herself, make the Dark Court think twice about attacking."

"Who cares?" Drake's mouth twisted into a sneer. "We can run through them. We both agreed that Sadler doesn't have the means to stop us."

I cleared my throat. "I wouldn't be so sure."

"What do you know?" Arlen asked gruffly. He was definitely still angry with me about Anya.

"I spent a lot of time there. I listened, I learned, and I know more about the Darkside than any of you."

Sorcha leaned forward, her dark eyes sparkling. "You spied?"

"I picked up a couple of things along the way. It's different there. The people are starving because nothing grows, and soldiers are being created from twisted creatures choking with the taint from the rift. They aren't prepared for a war, but they aren't alone."

Dymphna's eyes widened. "You don't mean there are spies here?"

"I don't know anything about that, but the doctor in the Dark Court isn't from here. He hurt me when... He was using a piece of the mirror." I caught Drake's gaze and desperately held on, willing him to just _see_ me. And that weakness made me angry at myself. "The mirror I saw on our journey back from the Fade."

Drake cocked his head. "It was real?"

"Yeah, but it's... odd. It moves of its own will. And it shows people different things. Bekind couldn't see her own reflection. Sadler only ever saw me in there, and I saw a lot of death. Sadler saw me married to him, so he made it happen. What if he sees other things?"

"Like what?" Arlen asked.

"Like where to go for help. The thing is, I think the doctor holds influence over Sadler, right down to the god he prays to, and he's probably helping Sadler get reinforcements."

"From where?" Drake demanded.

"Across the sea," I whispered, laying my palms on the table. "And the Darksiders believe that's where the doctor must come from. And if the doctor comes from across the sea... we don't want more of his kind here."

"How could you know this?" Dymphna asked.

I shrugged. "I had a visitor."

"In the human realm?" Brendan asked, sitting up straight. "When? How?"

"She was watching us for a while. The Darksiders don't want this war any more than I do. She warned me in the hopes I could do something... before it's too late."

"It's already too late," Drake said. "We're going to destroy every single one of those Darksiders. They'll all get what they deserve."

"The sick children deserve to die? The Darksiders didn't choose this life," I said, pissed off at his callousness. "You could have been one of them, in case you've forgotten. Most of the people in that castle are related to you."

"Do not speak of my family," he said through clenched teeth. "They deserve to die, and they will. One way or another."

_"All_ of your family?" I blurted.

His Adam's apple bobbed as he stared back at me. I felt Sorcha's gaze shift, and a shiver ran down my back.

"Let's get back on track," Brendan said. "If there truly is a fleet coming this way, and we don't know for certain that there is, we don't want to be distracted by a war with the Darksiders."

"They camp all over neutral territory," Drake said. "We have to wipe them out in case reinforcements do appear. Aside from that, their presence makes us all look weak. This is not the time to show weakness, Brendan. You, of all people, know this."

"Then we deal with one camp at a time," Brendan said. "But peacefully first."

"Prepare your troops," Drake said, "because the Silver Court is going to war."

I sat back and closed my eyes. Nothing was the same anymore.

# Chapter 5

A servant poked his head around the door and announced that the rest of the party had arrived. Drake sat back in his chair, breathing harshly.

"Send them to the hall," Brendan commanded. When the servant left, he shrugged. "We'll talk to the others over dinner. A few glasses of good wine seem to make them more... flexible."

We all stood.

"Cara, wait," Drake said. "I need to speak to you." When everyone else stared at him, he arched an eyebrow. "We'll only be a moment."

Brendan nodded at me before escorting the others out of the room. Sorcha glanced over her shoulder at her husband, looking uncomfortable. I was uncomfortable, too. I sat back down, just to stop myself from fidgeting like a child.

Drake took a couple of steps toward me then took Brendan's seat. He studied me. "You are well."

"Just get to the point," I said, suddenly finding it harder to breathe. "We both know you don't give a shit."

He bowed his head. When he looked up, he held my gaze with eyes that reminded me of our daughter, and my heart broke all over again. "Is it true?" he asked.

I looked away. "You need to be more specific."

"Did you kill Deorad?"

My fingers gripped the arms of the chair. "That's the first thing you have to say to me? You just want to know about Deorad?"

"I only want to know if it's true. Did you take away my revenge?"

He hadn't changed a bit. He was still obsessed.

"I put Deorad out of his misery."

"He should have suffered at my hands."

"He suffered enough at the hands of his own father. He didn't need his son to finish the job."

Colour had risen in his pale cheeks. "That wasn't your choice to make!"

"I had no other choice!" I glared at the man who had once sworn he would love me forever. "Sadler was using him to live. Killing Deorad weakened Sadler and gave me time to escape. In case you've forgotten, I was dead as soon as I gave birth, and I went into labour that night. I will never regret choosing my life over your revenge." I rose to my feet. "And that anger eating you alive is _exactly_ why I did the right thing."

He followed me as I made my way to the door, and just as I reached it, he grabbed my hand. "Wait!"

"What?" I turned to face him. I felt tears threatening, and I tried not to blink. "What could you possibly have to say to me?"

We gazed at each other, close enough to kiss and yet a million miles apart.

"I don't know," he whispered. "I have no idea anymore."

I pulled my hand from his and reached for the door handle. "That tells me everything I need to know."

"And the child?"

I hesitated. "She has your eyes." I let myself out without looking back.

I drew inward at the dinner table. Facing off with Drake was something I'd thought about for a year, but when he was right in front of me, I saw Scarlet, and I fell to pieces. With a different turn of events, the three of us could have been a real family. But I had come to realise that Drake would never be capable of sharing all of himself with someone like me. He had chosen power, and I had lost him before I ever truly had him.

He sat at the opposite end of the table, and I was glad I didn't have to look at his face for one more second. Someday, Scarlet would ask me questions, and I had no idea how to answer her without causing her pain. We had been cast aside for revenge. I had failed my daughter before her life had even begun, and I would be the one forced to hurt her with the truth because I couldn't watch her live a lie as I had.

"You should eat," Grim said. "People are staring."

I didn't even bother to look around at the other guests. "Let them. This isn't my kind of food."

Plates upon plates of pretentious-looking food had been placed in front of us. Not one person at the table managed to finish a portion before the plate was replaced with another. The indulgence of the Green Court was in stark contrast to the poverty of the Darkside. I wondered if anyone was remembering to go to the human realm for food for the Darksiders since I had left. Or had that been why the Darksiders were crossing over in the first place? Brendan's protection of me may have stopped the Darksiders from feeding themselves. I felt ill at the thought.

An old, chubby man I vaguely remembered as the lineage consultant rose to his feet. "I think it's time we talked proposals." He glanced at me. "I have a new idea."

"Really?" Brendan said dryly. He had barely eaten a thing, and his leg constantly jumped under the table.

With a smug expression, the man eased back into his seat. "We're all looking for a united realm, for a way to keep peace. I think we can all have what we want. You've been so reluctant to marry, my dear king, but you must realise that you have a responsibility to do what's best for the realm."

Brendan dropped his fork and sighed. "And what's that, Cathal?"

"To keep Sadler in line, you must marry his heir."

Brendan squeezed his eyes shut. The proposal was so outlandish that it took me a second to understand what Cathal was suggesting. I rose to my feet at the exact same time as Drake. We shouted "No!" as one. I experienced a brief moment of relief.

Then, Drake said, "And give Brendan access to the Darkside? Give him more of the realm? No. I refuse to allow the balance to shift to my rival. If anyone has a claim over that child, it's me. If Sadler dies, I'll kill every single Darksider and destroy the land to stop the taint from spreading. But nobody has the right to control that land except me."

I slapped my hand on the table. "You can't do that, either!"

"It's the only way." He looked at me. "And there's nothing any of us can do about it."

"Shit," I whispered. _"Look_ at you."

"Sit," Brendan said. "We can't destroy our own realm, and the blight is already spreading our way. Besides, it won't work. The taint is already in the human realm. It will reach us here, no matter what."

"What are you talking about?" Drake asked, still standing.

Sighing, I rolled up my sleeve, revealing the bracelet and the taint in my veins. " _This_ happened in the human realm. It's spread that far. But it's not so surprising. The Watcher warned us that the lines between realms were thin near his home, near the Fade. It was just a matter of time."

"If the taint destroys the human realm, our realm will die with it," Grim said solemnly. "We survive because they do. Our fates are intertwined."

"Nonsense," Cathal said in a prim voice.

"Oh, shut up," I spat. "Go back to matchmaking and leave the real problems to people who actually know what they're talking about."

Murmurs of confusion and anger spread around the table. I didn't care.

"Grim," I said, "what do you know?"

"We live on food and water like anyone else," Grim replied. "But we need humans to truly survive. Their realm breathes life into ours. The Watcher was right. We're connected in ways we don't even understand. If the human realm suffers, we will, too."

"We have to end the taint," Sorcha said. "The brownie is correct. A blight has come our way. It's a slow death, but death nonetheless."

"There's a more imminent problem," Brendan said, "one that could kill us quicker than any taint."

Everyone gazed at him, but he looked to me. "Tell them," he urged. "Tell them what you know."

I cleared my throat and stared at my black-polished fingernails. "The thing is," I said, "Sadler made deals with some kind of god. That's how he's survived so long. For a while, he used Deorad to sustain him, but I killed Deorad. He's trying with other fae, other relatives, but they're not working as well. He thinks my daughter will work better." I gave Drake a fleeting glance, wondering how much better a king would work. "He doesn't leave the castle, and he has a doctor with him. The doctor's not from... here."

"The Green Court?" a woman asked, sounding confused.

I shook my head. "No. I mean... not from this land. Some of the Darksiders think he came from beyond the water, that he uses a dark kind of magic on Sadler. Before I returned here, a Darksider came to me. She wanted me to go home—I mean, to the Darkside. She thinks that Sadler will calm down and stop relying on the doctor if I return, but I think it's too late because he's made more deals. He's ready for war, and he doesn't care if his people die as long as he destroys the other courts. He wants the realm to suffer, and he doesn't care who pays the price. He's just waiting for reinforcements. There are ships coming from across the water. If they arrive, they could change everything."

"Impossible," Cathal scoffed. "Nobody comes across the water."

"The daoine sídhe did," Dymphna said. "My ancestors came across the water. They were fleeing from something bigger than us."

"What's bigger than the giants?" Arlen murmured.

"Let's hope we don't find out," Dymphna said. "If this is true, we are without hope."

"Before anyone panics, we need to check the information," Drake said. "The Darksiders will do anything to win back the child, even try to fool her mother."

"It wasn't a lie," I said firmly. "But check it out all you want. I don't think any of us want to be caught unaware by whatever lives across the water. Those ships could just as easily cross over to the human realm. This land is in trouble, no matter how we look at it."

"First the taint and now this," a woman said. "What have we done to deserve this punishment?"

Cathal aimed an accusing look in my direction.

I stared right back at him. "It's not a punishment."

"What would you know about the concerns of the fae?" Cathal sneered. "Humans are broodmares to us. Let this one finally earn her keep. We _must_ use the child if we intend to hit back at Sadler."

"That would be very stupid of you, and it's about time the fae stopped making stupid decisions." I rose to my feet. "So keep my daughter out of your arranged marriage suggestions, or I'll cut out your tongue."

Cathal stood, his ruddy cheeks turning puce. "How dare you threaten me? You... _human_!"

I strode toward him with a smile on my face. I didn't see Cathal anymore; I saw Sadler, a mad faery trying to take my child away. A gasp ran around the room, and people shifted uneasily in their seats as I reached Cathal.

"Human," he echoed, as though he had lost all other words.

"Is that supposed to be an insult? This _human_ has accomplished far more than a few arranged marriages, and this _human_ will do anything to protect her child."

He cowered, falling heavily into his seat. Sweat ran down his puffy cheeks. "This is what we do. This is how we live. You have no right, no right at all, to come here and attempt to—"

"My child will choose her own path in life and not have one set for her. She won't be a pawn in your stupid game, and she won't be a weakling you can push around. If you mention her again, I'll—"

And then Drake was there. He took my arm and held me back. I gazed down at my hand and saw my fingers wrapped around the hilt of the dagger I didn't remember unsheathing. What was happening to me?

"He knows," Drake said, squeezing my biceps. "He won't harm her in any way."

"He won't," I said vehemently. "I won't let him."

Brendan came up behind me and put a hand on my shoulder. "He understands."

I shook both of them off and stepped away, looking around the room with scorn in an attempt to cover my confusion. "And maybe you should all remember that the people you want to cut through and kill are trapped on the Darkside. They're starving, and their children are born deformed. They might be pawns in the game of kings now, but they won't always. The blight is growing. I hope none of you are stuck on the wrong side when the great kings arrive to show off who has the biggest—"

"Let's move to the hall for some drinks and dancing," Sorcha called. "There's a lot to do, and we all have much to think about. Let us relax until the next meeting. I'm sure we're all exhausted."

People reluctantly began rise and shuffle toward the door, looking over their shoulders and whispering as they left. Cathal tried to stand, but Drake laid a hand on his shoulder and held him in place.

"A promise between a king and an infant would be a terrible idea," Grim said when the room had mostly emptied. "Sadler would instantly absolve his marriage ties and remove any leverage we've earned. Besides, a new heir for the Green Court would come a generation too late."

"And it's sick," I blurted.

"I demand retribution for this insult," Cathal spat, his face darkening to an almost purple shade. "I am a noble, an elite. I don't deserve to be treated this way by the Darksider's bitch."

"Remember who you're talking about and to whom," Drake said in a soft yet threatening voice. "These are dangerous times, Cathal."

Cathal snorted. "I hold the tides in my hands. I can turn families against you, entire bloodlines against either of you. I am valuable."

"If you want to find me a queen, then do so," Brendan said. "I give you leave. But I am not interested in a child bride. Do you understand me? This line of thought is over. I want to keep friends amongst the royals, not create new enemies. It was a foolish thing to bring up in company, and you deserved the small ounce of humiliation you received. This woman is Queen of the Dark Court. Remember that when you fall asleep at night."

Cathal's face changed. "This is unheard of," he spluttered. "I have been treated with—"

"I understand," Brendan said. "We have shamed you. We have been too consumed by this war to listen to you." He patted Cathal's cheek. "That changes now. Tomorrow, you may have my finest carriage, and you will find the Green Court the perfect bride. Can you do that for me?"

Cathal nodded, his chest heaving as he eyed the dagger in my hand. I still didn't recall reaching for it. Was the taint to blame? Or was that just a cop-out?

Flushed with heat, I turned on my heel. "I hope it takes him a while. I have a long memory." I strode out of the room and headed for the back stairs.

I sat on the bottom step and laid my face in my hands. I was losing control. My emotions had been manageable in the human realm, but the fae made me angrier than I would have ever thought possible. I had to leave them before I truly exploded. I knew what my fear did to them, even my lust, but I wasn't aware of the consequences of true anger. _Yet._

"Cara?"

I raised my head. Grim sat next to me on the steps.

"We haven't had a chance to speak," he said softly.

"Looks like we'll be busy for the rest of our lives."

"How are you? Truly?"

I sighed. "I don't know. Angry. Upset. Heartbroken. I'm so scared they'll take my daughter from me, Grim. You have to help me."

"I'm the king's adviser," he reminded me. The brownie was made up of various shades of grey. Even his clothes were of faded grey fabrics. Only the whites of his eyes and the pinks scars on his bald head broke up the dull tones.

"But you're _my_ friend." I held his gaze. "When you meet Scarlet, you'll understand. She's my life now."

"You can't make another person your entire life."

"You did."

He looked away. "We needed each other."

"My daughter needs me. She needs me to be strong and tough and wise. And I need her because I might..."

"Might what?"

"Turn into a worse monster than anything else here," I whispered. "The mirror showed me a future where everyone died, but I survived... except I was different. A terrible person."

"A Darksider?"

"They're not what everyone thinks." I lowered my voice even more. "Some of them helped me leave. They're suffering, too. Sadler's a madman with power. That's all."

"And you're his wife." He touched my hand, the one with the wedding band. "It looks like you want people to remember that."

"If I don't believe it, why would the Darksiders? We need to stop a war, Grim."

He smiled and patted my arm. "You're already strong and tough and wise. I'm glad we're on the same side."

I pulled up my sleeve to show him the blackened veins. "I'm one of _them_. We're not on the same side anymore. I'll always be on the wrong side to everyone."

He reached out. I expected him to touch the veins, but he ran his fingers across the green and silver woven bracelet instead.

"Are you really on one side?" he asked. "Out of everyone, you who aren't supposed to belong here, belong everywhere. This isn't your realm, but you could bring us the answer to the peace we need."

"Brendan's giving up on peace."

"But you came back to remind him. There will be death. There always is. There will be pain and suffering and struggles, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Sadler wants to use your child in the wrong way, but the people could see her as hope, the one person truly capable of uniting the realm."

"She's just a baby. And I only care about keeping her safe."

The brownie patted my hand. "You both survived terrible things. Anya was convinced her Mother had a plan for you. What if it isn't over yet? What if this is why you were brought here?"

"That's ridiculous," I said with a laugh. "If you want to stop Sadler, then you bring someone capable of killing him, not some idiot girl who can't see what's in front of her. You warned me time and time again that I couldn't trust anyone. It took almost dying, almost losing my own baby, for me to really see what you meant. And I came back again. I'm the epitome of a mistake. If some goddess thought I would change things for her, then she made a mistake, too." I rose to my feet.

"Cara..."

"You're wiser than me, Grim. But even you don't see that everything has changed. I don't trust everyone around me anymore, and I've become a person you can't trust, either. You can't be seen going against Brendan's court. You can't afford that. I made a mistake in there, but I would do it again. And that's why you have to keep away from me. Save yourself... because that's my only plan right now."

I walked away, hoping he believed me. Being my friend was becoming a dangerous thing.

# Chapter 6

I sat in Brendan's room and waited for him. I wanted to scream and shout and throw things, but I needed to be smarter. The fae didn't trust me, and even though I had gone to Brendan to keep my daughter safe, they still thought they could take her from me. Brendan might have sent Cathal away, but he would inevitably marry, and I would be down an ally.

Brendan's shoulders were slumped when he returned.

"You can't marry my daughter," I said sharply. "Ever."

His expression was guarded. "Do you really think I would do that?"

I threw my hands in the air. "How would I know? Look at Drake! I'm obviously not the best judge of character!"

He reached out, took my hands, and looked me in the eye. "You came to me for help, and I swore to you I would protect her. I will never force your daughter into a marriage with me. Do you understand? I will _never_ marry."

"What's that about?" I asked, confused by the emphatic statement.

"Do you not see me? Have you not heard what I've done to the women in my life?" A shell of the confident king I knew, he let go of me and sank into a chair.

I sat next to him. "You haven't done anything to me."

"I've fooled you, used my power against you, and let you be taken and hurt by Sadler. Look at us." He pressed his palm against my cheek. "I've stolen another of his wives, Cara. I've done it again. And for what? War is coming, no matter what moves I make. We will destroy ourselves."

"You didn't steal me. I ran away. You're... you're helping me, right?"

He ran his hands through his hair. "Sometimes, I don't even know. What am I doing? What have I done to the realm? Sometimes... sometimes, I wish I had returned to this world without a brand. I wish... I wish we had left here and returned to the human realm and never looked back. Have you never even considered that?"

I stared at him. "But you're _the_ king. And every day I spent in the human realm made me miserable. If it wasn't for Scarlet... I don't know how I would have ended up."

He studied me for a moment, and I couldn't get a read on him. "It's different for you, I suppose," he said at last. "Why should you want to stay in the human realm when you can't even experience true human emotion for fear of drawing attention from the wrong people? At least here you can be yourself."

"Be myself? Have you met Sadler? I can't be myself anywhere."

He held my gaze. "I know exactly what you mean."

"Brendan," I whispered, laying my hands on his broad shoulders, "you did terrible things in your old life, but you paid the price for them."

"Is that ever enough?" he asked. "Is there any way to wipe my hands clean? You don't know how much I've thought about it, wondered how to atone. There's no way out. I can't see a way to make up for my crimes."

"That isn't you anymore," I said. "You suffered for a long time, and you were reborn. You're different."

"You're wrong about me. If I was so different, you would never be this close to me," he said, his eyes half-closed. "I would have sent you somewhere else, somewhere safer."

"You're my friend."

"No, I'm not." He leaned over and pressed his lips against mine for a split second then jumped to his feet. "I'll organise your quarters. You can stay in the same room as before."

He stormed out of the room, leaving me struggling to understand the burning in my veins.

Fiadh and I watched through her window as a group of soldiers dressed in green armour prepared to leave to check on Vix's information about the ships. Brendan moved amongst them, making sure to address each soldier personally. They smiled or bowed in response, but all of them looked eager to please him. I understood the pull of his charm. My fingers moved to my lips in the memory of his brief kiss. But I couldn't think about that yet. There was too much going on, and I couldn't afford to read too much into the actions of a spoiled faery king.

Since Brendan had been doing his best to avoid me, I had sought sanctuary with the only Darksiders in the Green Court. Fiadh wasn't cruel or obnoxious, and her warrior, Conn, was quiet and steady. Their protectiveness over Fiadh's child made me feel safer with them than with anyone else.

I traced my finger across the glass. "They didn't believe me about the ships. Vix warned me, and I did my best, but they don't trust me. This is all I managed to convince them to do."

"At least they're doing this. And Vix was certain?"

"She was worried. She wants Scarlet to stay safe, I think. If this happens the way it might, then nowhere in either realm will be safe. Let's hope these soldiers find out quickly, either way."

"What if they don't return in time?" she murmured.

"Then pray Vix was wrong, or lying, or something."

"I don't think she was lying."

I sighed. "Neither do I. How's Setanta doing?"

"Good. He's happy he has a playmate. The daoine sídhe's child is boisterous and strong, but she's gentle with Setanta, almost as if she senses he needs a little extra care. He enjoys watching her run, I think, and it pushes him to try harder. Conn took them both to the gardens. The girl listens to him far more often than me. I suppose that makes sense. She's being raised by warriors."

"Her father was human," I said. "And I'm human, so what makes our children fae?"

She gestured at the window. "The air we breathe, perhaps. In this world, we see what we want to see. I want to see my boy run and play without help. Sometimes, it seems as though he's improving, then the melancholy will hit him, and he'll retreat again. It's the misery I don't know how to treat. The taint causes so much unhappiness."

"Ever think about getting him a pup or a kitten or something? I read somewhere that it can help."

She smiled. "Your human books know about tainted children?"

I shrugged. "Children are children, tainted or not. It was just a suggestion."

"And I thank you for it."

A knock at the door startled me, but Fiadh strode calmly toward the door, her full-length black skirt barely rustling. She was elegant, regal even, and I felt I could learn from her.

"It's our tea," she said softly as a servant stepped into the room carrying a tray. She motioned me to a chair beside the table. "Sit, my lady."

The cups rattled at the words "my lady."

"Is there a problem?" Fiadh asked sharply.

The servant shook her head, left the tray on the table, and fled.

When the woman was gone, Fiadh joined me at the table. "Not a fan of Darksiders, perhaps."

I shrugged. "To be fair, I got the same reaction from Sadler's staff half the time."

Fiadh poured out the tea. "Well, you must understand they had been hearing rumours about you. We all had. A new story reached us from court almost every day."

"Most of them were good to me by the end. The Darkside isn't what everyone makes it out to be."

She shivered. "Yet in some ways, it's so much worse."

"What about what's coming from across the sea? Is that worse than I've heard?"

"What have you heard?"

"That something terrible lives there, and nobody knows what. That the daoine sídhe were chased out of their homes and ended up here."

"What was left of them," she said. "They claimed to be a great race of people when they arrived. But their numbers dwindled during the war until a small number of them found a way to escape. They feared something terrible lived here, too, but they survived and settled. My grandfather used to tell me many great stories, but I didn't believe them all." She lifted her cup. "Now, I'm not so sure."

"How did you end up in the Darkside?" I asked. "I mean, you seem so... so..."

She laughed. "Perhaps you shouldn't finish that sentence. The Darkside crept onto my family's land. Once you're caught in its grasp, there's nothing left for you. Sadler had been secretly growing his troops and subjects, biding his time. He must be a very patient man. When I was young, the darkness was beginning to grow, but something happened to our land when it did. The darkness spread scarily quick, and the soil stopped working. Sadler promised us his help, and he sent us to stay at his queen's court. But my grandfather became impatient, so we returned. By the time we got back, Sadler had taken over our home. He killed every male in my family. I was the only one left. He promised I could live and keep my home as long as I married a man of his choosing. I had such pride in my home and in the memory of my grandfather that I agreed, thinking that one day I could restore our title."

"But he chose Glic."

"Glic." Her upper lip curled. "Barely a man. Noble by default. And I had nothing, so I was reduced to his level. I had lived alone in that wretched house for so long that the misery had engulfed me. It wasn't so bad at the castle, but after I agreed to marry Glic, he sent me home and abandoned me there as soon as I grew pregnant. I was alone again, but I had my child to care for. And Conn remained with me. Sometimes, I believe the taint doesn't affect him at all. He's the same, no matter what happens. I let myself be taken by the blight on my home, and it's only now that I'm free that I see Sadler must have interfered somehow. The darkness couldn't have spread so quickly without outside help."

"I hear that it's spreading quickly again, that maybe my journey to the Fade made it worse."

"Perhaps it did, but I wouldn't put anything past Sadler. He cares nothing for anyone. He's consumed by his own hatred. I'm sorry you were forced to marry him."

"And you, Glic." I chuckled. "I think I got the better deal."

She smiled. "You have your own troubles to bear. At least my child is with me. How are you coping?"

"I'm not. I'm just... functioning. I'm walking, breathing, talking when I have to, but my mind is elsewhere. As soon as this is over, I'll be with her again. That's what I live for."

She gave me a pitying look. "Have you made plans for an escape in case ships do arrive?"

"No. I suppose I'm hoping it doesn't come to that. You're free to stay or go, you know. You don't have to stick around because of the Scarlet thing."

"I know," she said softly. "But it's best for Setanta to stay here for now."

I shivered as I reached for my cup. "Do you think _I_ did what was best for my daughter?"

"You're the only one who can answer that." She hesitated. "You miss her terribly. I can see it in your eyes every time I look at you."

"I feel like a piece of me is just... gone. I've never felt anything like this before."

"I heard what happened at the dinner," she said. "The idea of marriage between King Brendan and your child. Arranged marriages have been part of our beliefs for a long time. We are matched to someone worthy, and the world keeps turning." She sighed. "That's how I ended up with a husband like Glic instead of Conn."

"I had a feeling there was something between you."

"Oh, there's nothing. He won't damage my reputation." She grinned. "Damn him."

"If I ever have any power, that'll be the first thing I fix. There's not enough love in the fae realm. That's everyone's problem."

"You have power."

"Not enough to help anyone I care about."

"Don't underestimate yourself. You wielded a kind of power over Sadler. There was a difference in him."

"He's crazy. If anything, I made him worse."

She cocked her head. "It's funny, but you would make a better leader than he."

"Don't spread the word." I laughed. "I just want a peaceful life."

"Yet you keep ending up back here."

"Well, I've never been smart."

"You're smart enough to have survived being Sadler's wife."

I held up my ringed fingers. "That hasn't quite played out yet."

She rubbed her bare ring finger. "I took off my rings when I came here. They're heirlooms, all I have left of my family, but it feels wrong for me to wear them when I feel so trapped by them. I hoped to keep them for Setanta to give to his bride, but what kind of woman will want to marry a broken, tainted man?"

I reached out and squeezed her hand. "One who's actually good enough for him."

"You're so kind to us. It's hard to understand sometimes." She nodded. "And is the stress and worry in your eyes all for your daughter?"

"No." I let a breath whoosh out of me. "I think she's safer than anyone else. I'm worried about the Darksiders who are stuck with Sadler. They'll be the first to die. And I'm worried about Brendan. He's beating himself up over the past, and I don't know how to help him. Then Drake..." I shook my head. "He's not the man I thought he was."

"He hasn't claimed your daughter as his own. That was cruel, but perhaps he feels it's necessary to protect her. A child of a king has the most to fear from the woman whose children will have the same claims."

I stared at her. "You think Sorcha is a danger to my daughter?"

"If she has children?" She shrugged. "You've seen enough cruelty to know how this world works."

"I can't let her hurt Scarlet."

"I know," she whispered. "And the Darksiders won't stand for it either. Do you understand me?"

"What are you saying, Fiadh?"

She held my gaze. "Deorad was nothing. I know you killed him, but I don't blame you. It was a kindness he didn't deserve, if I've heard the truth. But this child has a name. She's an heir. Her loss won't be tolerated. If she is killed by either of the other courts, Darksiders will rage against the murderer, be it queen or servant. And if the Darksiders kill his queen, the Silver King won't need an excuse to start a war. If _he_ kills Sadler, the Darksiders will be forced to fight for their own survival, but they won't win. It's impossible. And if these reinforcements of Sadler's land, who is to say they won't ravage the land and everything in it?" She leaned closer and lowered her voice. "If you want the Darksiders to survive, then you have to control the outcomes. You're the only person in the war councils who cares what happens to the Darkside. You're all they have to depend on." She leaned back in her chair.

"How do I do any of that?" I asked, my voice trembling.

"By playing the game. Don't be fooled. I have a stake in this. I want my home back. I want my son to be free to move around the realm without worrying his father or Sadler will snatch him. None of us are unbiased, so choose your advisers wisely. But know this: you might see yourself as human, but you're a part of our world now." She reached out and picked up my left hand. "These rings claim you. The fact that you still wear them means you have accepted that claim. Your daughter could be a true queen one day, but she needs you to pave the way."

"Queens and kings have a habit of dying around here," I said wryly. "Why would I want that for my child?"

"Because it will give her power that nobody else owns. She'll be able to protect herself even after you're gone."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you need to hear it from someone other than yourself."

I flinched.

Her smile spread. "I knew. As soon as I met you in Sadler's court, I knew."

"Knew what?"

"That you were the one who could change everything. We'd been waiting so long for change, and then you appeared. You have something that most fae pretend they don't—a heart without weakness. And I don't envy you, Cara. This is going to be a long and difficult road. But if your daughter becomes queen of the Darkside, I will pledge my fealty to her. You will have an ancient house at your back. Titles sometimes count, especially when they have strength on their side."

I gazed at Fiadh and saw how calculating she could be. I had more to learn from her than just grace.

I nodded, but a shiver ran down my spine. I wasn't sure whose side I was supposed to be on anymore.

# Chapter 7

I strolled through the rose garden, trying to figure out who I could trust and what I had to do to survive. I couldn't imagine Brendan doing anything to hurt my daughter, but he was a desperate king with a dark past. He was upfront about the fact that power had changed him, and his kissing me was just an attempt to control me. Did I really know what anyone was capable of? I had been so wrong about Drake. Líle had seemed sincere when she offered to kill Sorcha for me, but I had to wonder if she'd been sent by Drake as a means to free him of the banshee and give him free rein to start a war. If I counted as a Darksider, then _I_ could have been the instigator. I could have ruined everything with one word.

I was out of my depth. I wasn't trusted, and I didn't belong—not with Drake, not with Brendan, not with any of my faery friends. I was seeing them in a different light, and I couldn't tell whether it had to do with the taint in my veins or not. I kept remembering the mirror, how I had looked and the darkness in my eyes. I didn't want to be that person. I didn't want blood on my hands.

But what if it hadn't been a warning of a possible future path? Maybe the mirror had been helping me by showing me the only way to survive. To beat the fae, I had to act like one. And the thought of going up against Sadler gave me a weird kind of thrill. I wanted to face him again, but as someone who wasn't completely powerless or friendless. I wanted to fight back. I wanted to be a person the fae couldn't easily use. I needed _power_.

"You look as though the entire world is weighing on your shoulders," a familiar voice said.

With a fright, I looked to my left and saw someone I hadn't expected to see again. But he looked... different. That line of colour around his over-sized pupils was once again sky blue instead of white. Bart grinned and performed a little bow. Perhaps I only imagined it, but his back didn't seem as hunched as before.

"I thought you were dead," I said breathlessly, rushing over to him. "You were about to die. I saw them raise their swords against you."

His smile turned cocky. "I have a few tricks up my sleeve. Never worry about that. And how are you, my lady?"

"How am I? Holy crap! I feel like I'm talking to a ghost."

His laughter rang out. I glanced around to see if anyone was nearby, but we were completely alone. I shifted uneasily, wondering how he had gotten past Brendan's soldiers.

"You've nothing to fear from me," he said as if sensing my discomfort. "I won't harm a hair on your head. But I heard you had returned and had to see for myself. And here you are, as if no time had passed. Are they treating you better here than we did at the Dark Court?"

"Everything's... fine," I said, unsure of what to say to him. Bart was a Darksider but different.

"You looked worried on your lonely walk," he said. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

I shook my head. "You helped me escape from Sadler. Why?"

He shrugged. "I enjoyed the mayhem that followed. The birds sing of an heir to the Dark Court, a daughter. Is she well?"

"Very. No taint. She's just a regular human baby."

He showed his teeth. "I doubt that. Walk with me. We have much to speak about." He took my arm and led me farther away from the castle. "I don't want to be seen by the Green ones. I'm of the dark, after all."

"So am I," I murmured.

He glanced at me. "We'll see about that. The warriors here look alert. I take it you've heard news of Sadler's plans."

"What do you know, Bart?"

His nostrils flared. "He makes deals he doesn't understand. The dead are coming to fight his war."

"The dead?"

"It's complicated. Unique. And it's hard for the fae to understand because the last time this was attempted, those responsible were buried, and even that story is a myth. This world is older than any of them even dare to dream." His lips twisted into a scowl. "And these ships, these _reinforcements_ , may appear to come from lands across the sea, but they are instead _risen_ from the water, revived from the Nether's touch."

"Are you serious? How is that even possible?"

"Almost anything is possible for a god, and Sadler's god isn't restrained by many rules. Chaos never is, and Sadler's actions have fed Chaos, giving him a lot of power. What happens next will have irrevocable consequences."

"What _does_ happen next?"

He made a sound that could have been mirth or frustration. "You will stop it before it's too late."

"What can I do? I have no power."

He stopped and gripped my shoulders, staring into my eyes. "Power comes too easy to some. You trust overmuch in these kings, in their power. Power shifts."

"They're protecting my daughter," I said, feeling a little sick. "I have to trust in them."

"Do you? She's a pawn in this world. All three kings will use her. For her heritage, for leverage."

"Are you telling me I should go back to the human world? They'll only follow. They always do."

"That's not my plan." His mouth widened into a smile. "Know this. You can never trust another person to care for her as you do. I remember your devastation when you thought your child had died in the womb. You loved her dearly, and she survived. Perhaps you saved her, perhaps not, but there is no other who can protect her as you can. All you need to do is take the power for your own when you have the chance."

Flustered by the emotions and the memories his words provoked, I asked, "What are you talking about?"

"Are you strong enough?" he whispered. "Can you do whatever it takes to save the child?"

"I would do anything," I said, caught up in a whirlwind of emotion and magic.

He brushed his thumbs across my cheeks. "I think you believe that." He abruptly stepped away and bowed. "I'll leave you, my lady. Stay safe. There will be many battles before the end." He turned and disappeared into the trees.

I gasped and bent over at the waist, feeling an odd release, as if I had been temporarily trapped in an invisible cage. Bart was strange, but he was from somewhere afar. Who would know better than he what kind of monsters came from across the water? But I didn't know if I could really believe that they were creatures who had risen from the dead.

I hurried back to the castle, desperate to tell somebody what Bart had said. My first instinct was to tell Brendan, but he would be compelled to find the Darksider who had entered his grounds uninvited. Pride got in his way every time. I needed to give Bart a chance to escape, then I would be safe to talk. But I wasn't even sure Bart had told me the truth. My only other option was Fiadh.

Near the castle, I spotted some of Brendan's soldiers and forced myself to walk sedately past them. They watched me with wary eyes, but nobody stopped me as I stepped inside and made my way up the stairs. The few servants I passed gave me a wide berth. By the time I reached Fiadh's quarters, I was fit to burst. She answered the door, her blond hair loose and curling around her shoulders.

"Can I come in?" I asked.

"Of course." She stepped aside.

In her living room, Conn sat on the floor with Setanta, who was lying on a blanket and staring into the fire. The boy looked better than the last time I had seen him but still depressed. He reminded me a little of Líle. Conn looked up at me and nodded.

"Sit," Fiadh said, shutting the door. "You looked flushed. Is something wrong?"

"I had a visitor," I said. "Someone I met in Sadler's court."

"Who?" Conn asked. "Did he harm you?"

"No." I sat on the sofa. "It wasn't like that. Do either of you know Bart? He had something wrong with his back, but he's different now. I don't know. He came to warn me about the ships, but he said they aren't a living army. He claimed that Sadler made a deal with his god, and the ships are... sunken ships raised again. Something about undoing the touch of the Nether."

"The dead?" Conn said. "That's not possible."

"For a god?" Fiadh's face had paled. "It doesn't matter. There are reinforcements of some kind coming this way. If it's a deal, the only way to stop them is to break that deal."

"So what's Sadler's end of the bargain?" I asked, trying not to panic. A faery army was one thing, a reanimated dead faery army quite another. How could anyone kill what was already dead? Deorad's face came to mind; I had once killed a dead man.

"Something of that magnitude would require an incredibly high price," Conn said. "And Sadler even named his court for his god. He's building something we won't be capable of defeating. We should leave. There's no hope here."

"There's hope," Fiadh said fiercely.

"And Setanta? Are you going to risk his life for that hope?" Conn demanded. "Am I to watch you both die?"

Fiadh looked at me. "You must share this news with the kings. It may spur them into action."

"They can't agree on anything long enough to act," I said. "One wants peace; the other wants death."

"That's because he's tied to death," Conn said. "His wife is a servant of a god. He must be, too."

"You think Drake serves the god of death?" I asked.

"Why else would he want a war?" Fiadh murmured. "There's no better way to service such a god."

"He wouldn't." I tried to keep my voice steady. "He wouldn't kill people to make a god happy."

"Kings don't kill to make a god happy. They kill to make a god an ally. His wife is death's daughter. A child of death is only granted power by giving sacrifices. Death is the one god who never sleeps, who always fulfills his promises. Death is the only reliable god there's ever been."

"Drake saved me from being sacrificed," I said. "He doesn't care about gods and—"

"He cares for power, or he wouldn't be wearing a crown." She caught the look on my face and winced. "I'm speaking out of turn again. I'm sure you know him better than I. Let's forget about this subject and talk of nicer things."

But I couldn't imagine ever forgetting that conversation. If Drake aimed to become a son of death, then what did that make our daughter?

A light knock on my door interrupted my brooding. When I answered and saw Grim, I breathed a sigh of relief. He was about the only person in court I felt I could really trust, but he was also the adviser to a king. That alone put us at odds.

"Come on in," I said. "But the meeting's soon."

"I know. I wanted to escort you down."

I shut the door and watched him take a seat by the fire. "Where's Realtín?"

"Spying on the Darksiders."

_"Grim_."

He gave me a weak smile. "They're our rivals, at best. We need to be sure you're safe from them."

"Brendan asked you to spy on them?"

He shook his head. "We, as in Realtín and me. We want what's best for you. That hasn't changed. But you've been avoiding me."

"I've had a lot of disturbing things to think about." I blew out a breath. "And I'm not sure who to trust."

He looked pained. "You no longer trust me."

I took a seat across from him. The light from the flames deepened the hollows in his cheeks. He might have been free, but he looked as stressed as when he had been a slave.

I thought carefully through what I wanted to say before speaking. "There's no trust in this realm. In castles."

"You went through a terrible experience," he said. "And you blame us for it. You feel we should have rescued you."

"Sometimes, I feel that way. I get so angry. Nothing has been fair. But I blame myself, too. I thought about not having the baby. I seriously considered ending the pregnancy rather than facing up to the reality of the situation. And then, when I realised I could never do that, when I realised I wanted nothing more than to have that child, she was almost taken away from me. How can that not feel like some kind of punishment?"

"She was saved," he pointed out. "She's healthy, even now."

"She is, and I know I should feel grateful, but I have this thing in my head. Since Scarlet's birth, I've been imagining every single thing that could go wrong. I mean ridiculous stuff. But it's like my brain needs to figure out every possibility just to give me a chance to protect her."

"That sounds very stressful, Cara. Are you sure that's the best use of your time?"

"It's not a choice. It just... happens. I lie awake and think of all of these scenarios, and I'm not able to sleep until I've figured out solutions. It's like a living nightmare, but it's necessary. I have to be ready next time. I couldn't have predicted what happened in a million years. I can't have Scarlet in the position I was in. I can't have her desolate and confused, without hope, thinking nobody will ever save her. I have to be able to save her. I have to know she could save herself."

I only realised I was crying when Grim handed me a handkerchief. That reminded me of Bart doing the same thing in the Dark Court when Sadler had hit me and drawn blood.

"Everything's a reminder," I said, staring at the cloth.

"Time will—"

"I don't have time." I looked up at him. "What if what happened really was a punishment?"

"By whom? For what?"

"By some pissed-off deity. Because I didn't believe, because I thought about giving up my chance at motherhood, because... I don't know. Everything that's happened to us since the first night has been somebody else's plan. You realise that, don't you? Somebody else has always been pulling the strings."

"We ultimately have to choose," he said. "We don't get pushed and pulled our entire lives. We must make our own choices or nothing ever changes. And why would a god want to punish you?"

"Just a human, right?"

"And I'm just a brownie, Realtín is just a sprite, and Anya is just a pixie. When has that ever been of consequence? Cara, I don't think you realise what the rumours about you say."

"I keep hearing about rumours." I raised my hands in exasperation. "What do they say? That I'm the whore queen? That's what Sadler called me, and maybe he was right. I've thrown myself at both Drake and Brendan, knowing full well that neither of them really want me. I need my daughter to feel loved, Grim. I need her to know she has to love herself."

Grim's breath hitched. For a moment, I thought he was intoxicated on my emotions, but then I saw the glassiness in his eyes as tears formed.

"Grim?"

"I wish I could help you realise how loved you are. Your problem is not what others think of you but how you see yourself. You earned the respect of many Darksiders while you were Sadler's captive. Word came to us that you stood up to him, that you were benevolent and patient, that you behaved like a queen from the old stories, back when royals didn't need to be hard and cruel to survive. Sadler made himself look ever more the monster next to you. He's lost a large number of followers because of his actions. And all it took was a human's spirit to show him up."

"You're wrong. You're so wrong about me. I watched a servant die," I whispered. "And I didn't help him. I heard a woman... heard her being hurt by Sadler, and I was just grateful it wasn't me."

"You did all you could. I know you. And these rumours are not a bad thing. It's how we remember our heroes, Cara. Do you think any past king could return and take his place as if no time had passed? Our tales made sure that Brendan would be accepted again, and if the stories immortalise _you_ , then you rise above the pack, make it harder to target you. You're known for your kindness, and the stories of your deeds could positively influence the realm."

"But I'm not good or kind, Grim. I just wanted to survive, and I did whatever I thought it took. I killed Deorad to stop Drake's vendetta, and now Sadler's using countless others instead. My bad choices affected everyone. I've made their lives worse just by existing."

"This isn't like you." Worry lines creased his eyes. "This isn't you."

"This is _exactly_ like me. When Scarlet's around, I'm strong, I swear, but when it's just me, I can't... I can't do this without falling apart. Being back here has just made me see how weak I really am."

He slipped off his seat and came close to pat my hands. "You're the same person whether the child is with you or not. You just see yourself differently when you're alone."

"When she was growing inside me, I felt like I wasn't alone at all, like she was beside me, and I fell in love with her just for that. When she was born, I didn't want to let her out of my arms. Things have been a little tense between Anya and me. We both love Scarlet so much that we kind of fight over her." I snorted. "It sounds ridiculous, but I get jealous. I have to work, so Anya sees her more, but my daughter just makes me so happy that I can't help being greedy."

"Cara, don't do this," he said sternly.

I blinked in surprise. "Don't do what?"

"Don't do that child the disservice of placing your happiness on her shoulders. That's too heavy a burden. You must learn to be happy on your own. You can't depend on a child to make you so."

"What the hell, Grim?" I sniffed loudly. "You sound like Dr. Phil or something."

He frowned in confusion.

I laughed. "Never mind. I do trust you. I can't talk to anyone else like this."

"Tell me something," he said. "When you went back to the human realm, where did you go?"

"To my grandparents. The night Brendan arrived, my mother had been for dinner. She met Scarlet for the first time."

"How was that?"

"Weird. Awkward. I let slip that I knew about my dad not being my real dad."

"Did you want to see him?"

I shook my head. "I don't even know how to start down that road. I get that the things he did were partially influenced by the fae, but the fae exaggerate everything. They can't create something that never existed in a person's soul."

"We may never know. You'll see another relative today. The leanan sídhe will be at this meeting. I thought I should warn you."

"As far as I'm concerned, Bekind's my ancestor, not Nella," I said. "Did you know?"

"Brendan told me of his suspicions. Do you trust Bekind?"

I sighed. "I trust her with Scarlet's life. And a part of me feels like there are no more secrets. But with Bekind, you never really know. I'll never truly trust her, but I kind of love her sometimes."

His eyebrows rose. "That's new."

"It's been a while since we last spoke, Grim. A lot has changed. She kept an eye on the fae around us, and I felt safer with her there."

A bell sounded from out in the hallway.

"That must be the summons for the meeting," Grim said. "Are you ready?"

"No. I have to tell you something because I need your advice."

"What is it?"

I knelt on the floor in front of him and lowered my voice. "Two things, actually. A Darksider who helped me escape came to warn me that Sadler's reinforcements are the dead risen again. And Fiadh told me that Drake's war will feed the god of death with sacrifices. Tell me what to do with this information."

He frowned. "A god who undoes death would be an enemy of Sorcha's god. I thought you said ships were coming across the water."

"I did, but I was told that these are sunken ships or reanimated dead, or something to do with the Nether. My visitor also said it's not the first time something like this has been attempted, so maybe we can find out how it was stopped before."

"You must inform the others of this," he said. "While not impossible, this is something that hasn't happened in modern history. We'll need the lore masters to look into this to see if it could really be true."

"And what about Drake? Would he start a war just to gain a little power from some god?"

Grim hesitated. "Cara, I want to tell you not to worry, but I don't know Drake as I once did. He has distanced himself, made choices from afar that seem nothing like him. I just don't know what Drake's capable of anymore."

My heart wrenched because, of everyone, I could believe Grim. And if he doubted Drake, then I probably should, too. But that didn't feel any better than hating him.

# Chapter 8

I felt sick as I sat next to Grim at the meeting. Two dozen fae were already at the table. A couple of them openly glared at me. I pushed aside the cup of wine a servant placed in front of me. I needed a clear head.

Donella entered the room with Sorcha. All heads turned to watch them sashay over to their seats. The massive skirt of Donella's burgundy ball gown almost knocked over a passing servant, but she acted as though he didn't exist. Sorcha looked uncomfortable, but then I realised that it was because Donella was stealing all the attention. Donella greeted certain faeries with a smile, while completely ignoring others. She marked out her own hierarchy, and they all let her do it.

She stopped when she came to me and choked out a laugh as she waved a hand toward my black shirt. "Is it in mourning or merely too stupid to hide its loyalties?"

I stared back at her in silence, trying to work out how on earth I could be even distantly related to such a creature.

She sneered. "It looks at me as if we're on the same level."

"Oh, we're not on the same level," I said, turning away. "You're not even a queen."

Sorcha gave a little gasp that sounded suspiciously like a smothered laugh, then she ushered Donella to their chairs at the opposite end of the table.

"You don't need any more enemies," Grim murmured.

I grinned at him, feeling a little more like myself.

The group rose to their feet as Brendan and Drake entered the room. The two seemed to be in a deep discussion about something. I started to stand, too, but Grim pinched the back of my hand.

"If being a queen is your ace, then don't spoil it by standing for a king or two."

I looked at him and saw humour darkening his eyes. "You're a bad influence on me, brownie."

"It's always been the other way around."

Brendan and Drake moved to the head of the table. They both stood behind their seats.

Brendan put his hands on the back of his chair. "We'll get right to this." His smile was wide, but his tone was laden with uneasiness. "Moments ago, news arrived of an attack within the borders of the Green Court. The Darksiders overwhelmed a small force of soldiers and cut through a village of innocents before retreating."

"That makes no sense," I whispered to Grim. "Sadler wouldn't leave himself unguarded now. His army isn't large enough to divide like that."

Grim leaned close to me. "Perhaps he's taking risks because he's sure reinforcements will come."

"But why would he send them this far only to call them back? What was the point of the attack?"

Grim gave me a pointed look. "Perhaps we'll find out if we listen more and whisper less."

I rolled my eyes but went back to paying attention to the two kings. Drake gestured at the door, and a trio of weary-looking scouts entered.

"The Darksiders ravaged the entire village," the tallest scout said. He was young, and he wore silver—Drake's team. "They're pushing forward more consistently than before. We can't hold them back for much longer if we aren't reinforced. We're losing ground. There have been betrayals." He bowed his head at Drake. "We dealt with those in the appropriate manner, but it won't be long before morale bottoms out unless something is done."

"This is troubling," Sorcha said. "Sadler grows brave when we hear he should be weak."

"It could have been a distraction," Arlen said, "something to coax our forces away from the castle."

"I'll offer sanctuary to those who wish it," Brendan said. "We need the armies to stay close right now."

The scout looked alarmed. "That many people travelling will cause mayhem and make it harder to track the Darksiders. And the people will be more at risk of attacks on the roads. The forest is teeming with Darksiders."

"Who is doing the attacking?" I asked loudly.

The scout blinked a couple of times. "Wh-What?"

"Who did you see attacking? What kind of fae?"

"Darksiders... um..." He glanced at one of his companions for help, but the female only shrugged.

I placed my palms flat on the table. "That doesn't really narrow it down. How do you know they're Darksiders? What do they look like? Are they tainted? Are they—"

Colour flooded the young scout's cheeks. "They're Darksiders. They're all the same."

"They wear black," the female said casually, "so we kill them." From her tone, she might have been talking about sitting down for tea. She was pretty large to be a scout, and my suspicions grew.

"I thought you were scouts, not assassins," I said. "Who attacks first?"

"What the hell does it matter what they look like?" Drake demanded. "They're Darksiders. They deserve to die."

"What did every single Darksider do to deserve that?" I asked.

Drake's face took on a ruddy hue. "Gave their loyalty to Sadler!"

I leaned forward. "They didn't have a choice. Who else wants them? Who wanted to deal with the Darkside? Nobody. That's what led to this mess."

"They bring the taint with them," a green-clad court member said. "They poison our land with their touch."

"Death is the only way to scrub the taint from our territories," Donella added.

"Death isn't going to seal the rift in the Fade," Grim said.

"No, but it'll slow Sadler down for a time," Brendan said in a wry tone.

"What if we send him back his queen?" one of the fae said. "It might appease him for a time."

Donella made a scoffing sound. "And if she tells him everything that's gone on here?"

I leaned back in my chair. "We need to go to Sadler. That's why I'm here, isn't it?" I looked to Brendan, but he had his gaze fixed on Drake. "It doesn't matter how many battles are won in neutral territory against Sadler's men. There's something else coming. Sadler has reinforcements on the way, ships that will—"

Donella scoffed. "All of this on the word of one Darksider?"

Grim nudged me. I glanced at him, and he nodded encouragingly.

"Not just one," I replied with a great deal of reluctance.

Drake stared at me. "What's that supposed to mean, Cara?"

I gripped the arms of my chair. "I've heard some more news. Rumours, really, but from... well-informed sources."

"And you came upon this information how?" Sorcha demanded.

"It doesn't matter right now. What matters is Sadler's deal." I gave Drake a pointed look. "Apparently, Sadler's about to piss off the Silver Court's god because _his_ god is busy raising the dead. The ships are sunken boats that are rising to aid Sadler. I don't know the details, but I've heard enough to feel like we're not on the winning side. Sadler doesn't care who lives or dies. He just wants to punish us all. And if any of the things I've heard about what lives across the water is true, then we're all in serious trouble. If the taint doesn't kill the realm, Sadler's necromancy-loving god might."

"Ridiculous," Donella said after a brief silence.

"This is an attack on us," Sorcha said. "Undoing my god's work? How could it not be a mark of war?" She sounded terrified, and that sent chills down my spine.

"The loremasters could help with this," Grim said. "All they have to do is look for instances in the past when something similar might have occurred."

"Something's coming," I said. "So we need to take the fight to Sadler before those boats arrive. By the time word gets here from your own scouts, it could be too late. We need to move now."

"She wishes us to leave the castles undefended," Donella said. "A devious plan."

I slammed my hand down on the table. "I don't give a crap about the castles. I just don't want to watch everything burn while Sadler gets his kicks. Do you really not understand what he's capable of?"

Red blotches spread across Donella's face. "He had me sent to the Fade!"

I snarled at her. "And now you're back. Boo-fucking-hoo."

"How dare—"

"Silence," Brendan said. He barely raised his voice, but we all obeyed. "I can't believe in a resurrected army. That's not going to leave this room. Do you all understand me?" He glared at the scouts. "The person who spreads this news will lose his tongue."

Drake nodded. "If we destroy the Darksiders now, there won't be anything left for an invading army to fight for."

"I've been saying from the beginning that we need to send an assassin," a ruddy-faced man said. I had seen him before, but I didn't know his name. "Send him his queen. Just let one of her escorts take care of Sadler when she gets them close enough."

"That won't be enough," Donella cried. "When his supporters rise up against us, we'll regret leaving this to a silent assassin."

Drake gestured at Brendan. "Let's end this now, as we should have a year ago."

"We agreed," Brendan said.

"The Darksiders need to die."

I rose to my feet. "Then let's get started." I raised my hand. "Here's your first Darksider to kill in cold blood. Want me to fetch my daughter to be second?"

Drake scowled. "Don't be so childish."

"You said we all deserve to die. You can't pick and choose whenever you feel like it."

"You're not a Darksider. You're a human." He gave me a dismissive wave. "I don't know why you're even here."

"I've spent more time on the Darkside than anywhere else in the faery realm! I married their king, and I was left to rot with him. I went into labour in the Darkside. I'm nothing but a Darksider!" My voice had risen to a scream by the end, but the blank, uncaring expression on his face infuriated me.

"You are a human!" Drake shouted, those pink spots reappearing in his cheeks. He laid his palms on the table. " _Nobody_ is going to kill a human for being kidnapped by a madman."

"You're turning into that madman, or haven't you noticed?"

"Enough!" Brendan bellowed.

I tried not to shiver, but it was impossible. I felt the reverberations of his power in my very soul. And I was jealous of it.

"This is getting us nowhere," Brendan said in a calmer tone. "Bickering like children will not end this war."

"No," Drake croaked. "No, but an army will. You know what must be done. She's swayed by her humanity. She doesn't see what we see. Sadler has humiliated you at every turn. He stole those you protected right out from under you, he's spent the last year aiming raiding parties our way and bothering our subjects, and now he feeds someone he believes you trust with fantasies of zombie armies."

I gasped. "Excuse me? Sadler hasn't fed me anything. If you think that, then you really are crazy. The rumours came from people who helped me escape from Sadler. Or do you think that was part of Sadler's plan, too? The people who come to me want my child to stay safe, even if it puts them in Sadler's crosshairs. They're helping me because—"

Drake looked at Brendan while jabbing a finger in my direction. "You see? She believes anything they tell her because they showed her moments of kindness amongst the torture. It's not her fault. She was held captive for months. The humans even have a term for what's happened to her, how she's come to care for the very people who kept her prisoner."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, for the love of—"

"Perhaps she's the one feeding us," Donella said in a sly voice. "After all, nobody else has seen these visitors of hers. How could a Darksider make it past the soldiers? How can we be sure that she's not Sadler's spy? Who knows what he promised her?"

Everyone fell silent as most turned to study me. My cheeks burned at the intense interest... and coldness. "So I'm not trustworthy now?" When neither Brendan nor Drake spoke up, I bristled. "Well, fuck you, too." I stood. "If I'm not to be trusted, then why am I even here?" I headed for the door, too shaken and angry to do anything but escape.

"Wait," Brendan said. "I'll gather a small force to accompany you to the Darkside. Whether the fight is against Sadler or some dead army, it's time to move." He glanced at Drake. "Apparently, peace just isn't an option."

Brendan's shoulders slumped. My heart twitched. Brendan had asked me to come back to avoid a war. Now it was happening anyway, and I was stuck in the middle of it.

# Chapter 9

Someone was on the other side, kicking my coffin. Panicked, I slammed my fists at the wood. The lid flew open, and I fell into nothing.

I flailed my arms and legs for a few seconds then opened my eyes. I was in bed in a castle in the Green Court.

"Shit," I whispered, then I flinched as someone pounded on my bedroom door.

Still on edge from the dream, I grabbed my dagger from the bedside table then stumbled out of bed to the door. I brandished the knife as I opened the door. "What the hell is up with the noise?"

With a lazy grin, Brendan leaned against the door jamb. He nodded at my dagger. "Is that what it's come to?"

I lowered my arm. "Careful. I might betray you. You know, like the time I risked my life to help you get your crown back, and oh, yeah, that other time when I went to fucking purgatory to save your soul."

"And I _did_ thank you for that, didn't I?" He laughed at my frown. "Ah. Still angry. Remember now, I wasn't the one who said those things. I have never once told you I didn't trust you, but as far as I recall, you've thrown those words at me often enough."

I glared at him. "You didn't contradict anyone at the meeting. You didn't stick up for me. You didn't fight for anything. You just... caved."

He held up his hands. "Peace, Mistress of the Dark."

"Jesus, you make me sound like some kind of crappy dominatrix. Why are you here, anyway?"

"I thought you might like to take Dubh out for a trip today. Break up the accusations and anger a little. You can always go back to feeling bitter later."

"I can go?" I narrowed my eyes. "And will I get an arrow in the back because someone thinks I'm rushing off to the Darkside to share all your secrets?"

"Well, I suppose I'll just have to accompany you to make sure that doesn't happen. We leave in an hour. Meet me outside." He gave a little bow and walked out of the room, leaving me feeling as though I had been tricked into something yet again.

But a trip on Dubh sounded far better than sitting in my room and wondering if my daughter missed me. Despite thinking that Brendan likely had ulterior motives, I wanted to go somewhere that wasn't the castle.

Before I had returned, Brendan was so confident that he had organised clothing. The clothes had been embarrassingly ill-fitting. Pregnancy had changed almost everything about me, and that made me self-conscious.

Some of the fae were still happy to pamper their king's pet, however, and my new wardrobe was already full of beautiful dresses the needle-fingered seamstress had been making for me on an almost daily basis. She didn't even bat an eyelid when I requested black. I thought some perverse part of her found it amusing to indulge me.

I found a black riding outfit and changed. The outfit made me feel at home, even though I should have felt as though I were dressing up like a faery again. I shrugged off the negative thoughts and headed downstairs.

Brendan was sitting on a low stone wall outside the castle, kicking his feet like an overgrown child. When he saw me, he grinned. "Early for a change. Come. The horses are already ready and waiting."

He hopped off the wall and strode toward the stables, and I followed. A couple of servants bowed and backed out of his way. He nodded at them as he passed. It was still early, so most of the court and visiting guests weren't awake. Plenty of soldiers were patrolling, but they pretty much ignored me.

A groom was standing in front of the stables, looking uncomfortable as Dubh stamped and snorted by her side. Cheering up, I raced past Brendan and reached the horses first. Dubh strained to greet me, knocking the groom over in his eagerness to break free.

"Dubh, you meanie," I said, patting the horse before helping the groom to her feet. "You okay?"

She nodded, but she inched away from the horse and me, her eyes glinting with distrust. Brendan reached us and took the reins of the other horse. It was a golden yellow and almost as large as Dubh. It held up its elegant head, glistening in the morning light. I gave Dubh a doubtful look. Somehow, he looked even bigger than I remembered.

"Need a hand?" Brendan asked me. "It's been a while."

The offer of help stung enough to force me to try alone. I moved awkwardly but eventually managed to put one foot in the stirrup and haul myself onto Dubh's back. He took a couple of steps as Brendan called out orders to a nearby group of soldiers. I ignored the stares and looked around me, feeling safer on Dubh's back.

"Ready?" Brendan asked, childlike excitement in his eyes. On the back of the golden horse, he looked as if he had just stepped out of a story.

"Am I going to regret this?"

He laughed. "You're human. You regret everything." He moved his horse closer to Dubh then leaned over to whisper in my ear. "Come on. You need to relax. We both do, and we can't do it here. It'll suffocate us if we don't break free from time to time."

I caught his eye and decided he meant that. "I don't think we're supposed to be free."

"Then it's a good thing we're not leaving the grounds. I'm sick of being watched, and I'm getting away from everything this morning. Join me or not. Do as you will." He dug his heels in and trotted away on the beautiful horse.

Dubh tossed his head as I hesitated. "Screw it," I said. "Let's go, Dubh."

We easily caught up with Brendan, then he and I rode in silence away from the castle, past the seemingly endless gardens, and onto a stretch of firm ground that was perfect for riding. The sun was mild, and the wind warm, but the best part was that I didn't see anyone watching us. We cantered away from trees and possible hiding places until we were surrounded by grass that stretched out for miles.

"Wanna race?" I asked, mostly to break the silence.

"I play to win," Brendan said. "I wouldn't race against Dubh."

"Wimp. So what's this about? I mean, it's nice and all, but we could have strolled around the castle, too."

"I wanted to talk to you away from prying eyes. I know you're angry about these meetings and the decisions we're making, but things have changed."

"I noticed." I urged Dubh forward, but Brendan kept up with our pace.

"You've changed, too. You tell secrets only when you feel you have to. Why didn't you tell me about this dead army?"

"Because I had only just found out. And I wasn't sure what to think. I mean, he could have been wrong. He could have been lying. I just needed to let it sink in first."

"He?"

"Bart. He helped me escape the castle. He risked his life to give us a couple of extra seconds." I huffed out a choked laugh. "I thought he was dead, then he just reappears. He wanted to warn me."

"About what?"

I kept my gaze straight ahead. "About the ships."

"What is he to you that he would risk his life to help you leave Sadler then again to reach you in a rival court?"

"What are you, jealous?" I threw a dirty look his way. "Why is it always such a surprise when faeries are capable of caring about more than just themselves?"

"Because it rarely happens, Cara. There's always an ulterior motive." He grinned. " _Almost_ always."

"Yeah, well, now there's a lot more at stake than we thought. But maybe this is good news. Bart said this is a deal. Deals can be broken. If Sadler dies, then why would anyone want to fulfil their deals with him?"

"Why indeed?" He sounded unhappy. "And what kind of a god would raise the dead for Sadler? I wonder if this god is the real reason I ended up in the Fade."

"I wouldn't be surprised."

"Fanatics. And you wonder why I'm against the devotion to Brighid."

"Not quite the same thing. Sadler doesn't care if he lives or dies," I said. "Not really. He's crazy. I mean, seriously batshit. There's no talking to him, no compromises that can be made. He wants you dead, Brendan." I pulled on Dubh's reins to slow him and peered over at Brendan. "You can't have peace with a man who wants you dead."

His scar creased deeper. "I thought I could do this. Protect the realm. Be the king my parents intended. But every move I make is thwarted. Every intention is twisted into something ugly." He stared off into the distance. "Our wars are terrible things. They last for so long that nobody alive remembers why they started in the first place. I can't be the one to bring about that kind of torment to this land."

"So we kill Sadler before a war has the chance to get started. His death could be the key to peace."

His expression was pained. "And you scare me when you start to sound like Drake." He shook his head. "We should eat soon. You haven't had breakfast yet."

We cantered until we found trees again. Among the small copse, we dismounted next to a spring. When the horses were taken care of and ready to graze, Brendan and I sat on the grass to eat the picnic lunch he'd had the kitchen maids prepare. I was glad to see the food was plain: fruit, bread, cheese, and some sandwich meats. But there was still so much of it.

I looked at all of the food and sighed. "This would have been a feast in the Darkside."

He handed me a glass of faery wine that I set aside. "That bad?" he asked.

"Nothing grows. The soil is so badly tainted that they can't harvest anything they plant. It just won't grow. When I was there, they started getting some food for me in the human realm because the midwife was kinda bossy. I shared it with the refugees, but—"

"Refugees?" He nodded. "Oh, the tents. That's what was going on. At first, I assumed it was a show of force of some kind."

"No. They just had nowhere else to go. Nobody over here wants them."

He shifted uncomfortably. "They could be quickening the spread of the taint."

"Then so could I. Are you going to kill _me_ , too?"

He held my gaze, and his expression softened. "You have to understand how much has changed now. I can't—"

"You're the king."

"No." He lay back on the grass. "I'm _one_ king. I'm not the supreme ruler. There's no one person with all of the power. We share our power, so none of us will reach our peak. And when you're not the only one, people have choices. They can choose to leave if they don't like our decisions. They hold that over our heads. In fact, my court has more power over me than I do over them. Did you know that there are more undeclared fae now than ever before? Solitaries used to be the minority, now they have enough to forge a kingdom of their own." He groaned. "If a fourth king shows up, I'm running away."

"Maybe having one king wouldn't work anyway. That's a massive target. At least this way, it's divided a little."

He laughed. "I appreciate your logic." He reached out and touched my arm. "The wish I have to stay in the human realm is stronger than ever."

"Why? What's in the human realm?"

He thought about that for a moment. "Freedom, I suppose. Or at least, the idea of it. The hint of it."

"Nobody is free. Not really. Not here or anywhere else. We all have responsibilities. Yours just happen to affect a lot more people than usual."

He waved his hand. "Then perhaps it's simply the idea of being free from court for a time. You know, those times we spent in the human realm before I was sent to the Fade again were some of my favourites."

"Pretty much everyone wanted both of us dead, idiot."

He stretched out his legs and laced his fingers behind his head. "And what's changed?"

"Ever wonder what things would be like if just one event hadn't happened?"

"Like what?"

"Like... me finding the fae, or you ending up in Drake's body, or him being branded. Or if I had stayed in Sadler's castle."

He rolled onto his side to look at me. "You would be dead by now if you had stayed."

"I know. I just... I wish there was a way we could make everything perfect."

"Nothing's ever perfect." He got to his knees and started gathering the remains of our lunch. Come. Let's walk for a while before we turn back. I'm not exactly eager to return."

I helped him clean up, then we left the horses alone to wander along the thicket of fruit trees.

"How are you being treated?" he asked, reaching up to pluck a stray apple from a branch. He offered it to me.

I pursed my lips. "They watch me, your people. They frown at my clothes."

He offered the fruit to me. "Which is why you wear them."

I shook my head then looked away so he wouldn't see my grin. "That's not the only reason I wear them. The fae in your court mostly ignore me, though."

We reached the edge of the orchard. Ahead was a grove of wisterias that wound around a narrow path.

"This is pretty," I said.

Brendan shoved his hands into his pockets. "The prettiness is being killed by the Darkside, Cara."

"We could look for the tree that made the weapon I used to kill Deorad. It could be the key to everything."

"If it were here, somebody would know. Surely the Miacha would know. They've been in the Great Forest longer than anyone."

"Maybe it doesn't grow in the Great Forest. Maybe the Guardian would know."

"You truly met the Guardian of the Forest?"

"I think so. He wanted Brighid's flower as payment for helping me." I glanced at him. "Don't you think it's time you stopped hating Brighid?"

"You think some ancient goddess saved you, but it isn't true. You saved yourself. Stop thinking she'll swoop in and save your Darksiders, too." He upped his pace.

I hurried after him and took his arm. He stopped walking and stared down at me, something unrecognisable in his eyes. He had told me once that he wasn't as pretty as Drake, and that was true, but he had something Drake didn't. Brendan had enough power, charm, and experience to turn everything in his favour.

I held his gaze. "What if _you're_ the one who can save the Darksiders?"

"Cara, how can I do that? Sadler's leading his own people into a war that will surely kill them. Even if it doesn't, Drake will be right there, ready to wipe them out."

"You could stop both of them. Stop all of that from happening."

He held my hands. "How? How do I stop two kings intent on killing each other?"

"Just hold on a second and think about this. What is it you want? Really, Brendan, what is it you want to happen with the Darksiders?"

He sighed. "Honestly, I wish that part of the realm would break away and float off in the sea. It's going to kill everything here, and I don't know if we'll be able to stop it. You said it yourself: nothing grows in that soil. Even if we find the tree that cleans the taint, how will it grow in the Darkside? We need to seal the rift in the Fade, and nobody knows how."

"Somebody has to know. Maybe the Watcher, maybe—"

He cupped my cheek with his palm. "You have a good heart, but the fae are dying. All I'm doing is trying to prolong it as much as I can."

"The Darkside is part of the realm. You said before you wished you could have done more to protect the fae. Here's your chance to do something different, something amazing. You can't stand by and let somebody kill innocent people just because he hated their ruler."

"Are they innocent? They come here and kill."

"They're ordered to do that. And that's just the soldiers. The army isn't large. I don't know why you're all having so much trouble with them. Most of the Darksiders are ordinary fae, trying to survive. You have to get that."

"If I don't go along with Drake, what's to stop him from aligning with Sadler long enough to wipe out my court and my people?"

"He wouldn't do that."

"I don't know what he's capable of anymore," he said softly. "I'm sorry, but he's unpredictable now. I understand why, but he's pulling away from everyone, and the only way I can take care of the Darksiders is to take that part of the realm for myself." He gave me a steady look. "And to do that, I have to fight against Drake. Is that really what you want? Could you watch us war and still be on my side?"

I couldn't answer that because I didn't know. "Tell me something." I gripped his hands tightly. "What would have happened if I had killed Sadler the night I left? If he had died in that tower, what would now look like?"

He frowned and started walking again. "If Sadler had died, then Drake and I would have divided up the Darkside between us before another Darksider decided it was time to rise to power."

"So what would have happened to me and Scarlet and the Darksiders?"

"Much the same, I suppose. You would have gone back to the human realm to have your daughter. We would have killed any protesting Darksiders and staked our claims. Drake would do what he wished with his portion, and I with mine."

"And the line of succession?" I asked.

"You mean Deorad's children?" He shrugged. "I doubt Drake would have allowed them to live in case they made a claim."

We reached the end of the grove and came upon a meadow. I realised that Scarlet's worth would drop if Sadler died. Drake hadn't claimed her, and Brendan was only protecting her until he married and had children of his own. A target would be removed from her back, and the fae could forget about her. Or worse, they would get rid of us both, just in case.

"What is it about these Darksiders that makes you care about them?" Brendan asked. "Why are you so interested in what happens to them?"

"I lived with them. They're like any group of people. Some are decent, others, not so much. But they looked after me as best they could. Most of them are scared and worried about what will happen to them. They don't want war. That's Sadler's thing."

"I saw some in the Chaos Court with the same lust for war in their eyes," Brendan said. "If Grim had been there, he would have recognised many of the old queens' servants."

"I'm sure some of them still want revenge for what was done to the queens, but most of them are trapped there, forbidden by Sadler to leave. Lots escaped in the night before I left. I hear more ran after I did. They're probably in hiding and being hunted down by Sadler. You could help them."

"They haven't come to me for help."

"If they did, what would you do?"

We veered away from the grove.

"I don't know," he said. "It would depend on them."

"The longer we wait here, the less time we'll have to figure out what to do about those ships."

He stopped walking and faced me. "Unless we kill Sadler, you mean."

I gazed up at him. "I could help."

"By leading an assassin to him? That would stain you with the same deed. You're not a murderer, Cara."

"I killed Deorad. I killed Darksiders on the way to the Fade. I'm not afraid anymore. I know what needs to be done."

He brought up his hand and caressed my cheek, which made my heart beat faster. "I know you're not afraid. But you feel guilt. Death weighs on you."

"He hurt me," I whispered. "He scared me, and he killed innocent people for nothing. I _hate_ him. He's sick in the head, and he needs to die. It could be the only way to stop the ships."

Brendan smile was indulgent. "You truly want to help our assassin get close to Sadler?"

No, I wanted to _be_ the assassin. But everything would change if he knew that. "I just want to face him this time and not be defenceless. I want him to know he has no power over me anymore."

"He knows that already."

I covered Brendan's hand with mine. He was overflowing with doubt, and I had to convince him, or I would be stuck in the Green Court forever. "He won't ever stop. There's only one way, and it might even prevent this war."

He rested his other hand on my hip and closed the space between us. "Cara, I—"

Dubh neighed and raced toward us. When he reached us, he bent his head and bit my shirt.

"On the horse," Brendan urged. "Quick!"

He helped me up then mounted behind me. I heard a familiar whizzing sound as Dubh began to gallop. I looked over my shoulder and saw an arrow sticking out of the ground behind us. A second and a third followed, but all of the arrows fell short. When we reached the shelter of the trees, Brendan pulled on the reins to stop Dubh. All was quiet, and no one was in sight.

"They're gone." Brendan slid off the horse. He rested his hand on my knee and squeezed. "Still care about those Darksiders? Because they just tried to kill us."

# Chapter 10

Back at the castle, Brendan ordered his soldiers to be on high alert, then he retreated to his office to hole up with Drake. I paced in my room, trying to make sense of the scenario. Why would the Darksiders want to kill me now? They had taken a huge risk by getting so close to Brendan. Then, they had run away instead of chasing us down and killing us while we were defenceless. Something hovered at the edge of my brain, but I couldn't quite snatch it out of the ether and give it weight.

Irritated, I raced downstairs to go to Brendan's office. I hurried down the hallway, noting the presence of a half-dozen soldiers outside the doors.

"I wouldn't," someone said from behind me.

I turned and noticed Sorcha standing in the shadows. I must have walked right past her. "I just need—"

"Only kings allowed." She gave me a wry smile. "Apparently, the title of queen only takes you so far." She stepped away. "Well, I'll leave you to it."

"Wait!" I held out an arm.

She recoiled, but she didn't leave.

"I just... back in the Dark Court, when Sadler... went too far, I heard you say you felt death."

She looked away for a moment, her long raven-black hair glimmering in the sun's rays coming through a stained-glass window above the stairs. "Did you have a question?"

"Yes, I have questions. Was my baby dying?"

Her eyes became suspiciously shiny. "My god approached for his gift, but somebody else beat him to it."

"Who? What are you talking about?"

She let out a shaky sigh and turned her head. "All I know is that the child was slipping away, that death was nearing, and then suddenly, it wasn't. Maybe it was luck. You have more than your fair share of that. Or..."

I wanted to slap the information out of her. "Or what, Sorcha? Tell me now."

"Somebody with as much power as my god interfered." She raised her head and sneered. "Gods don't interfere forever. Perhaps the third time will be the charm."

She stalked off, leaving me stunned. The third time?

Then it dawned on me. Sorcha had known I was pregnant before I did. She had planned on letting me go free after Brendan's ceremony until she realised the truth. That was when she decided to kill me, to kill my baby before she had even formed. I swallowed hard as I stood still in the hallway. I would never be safe in the faery realm. I would always need protection. And I was getting tired of relying on other people to protect me. I needed to look after myself. I needed to be the one to take care of Scarlet, because unlike everyone else, I would never let her down. A pang of longing hit me. I wanted to see her so badly.

The office doors opened, and the soldiers moved out of the way. Drake came out and walked down the hall. He stopped short in front of me, a weird look of panic on his face that would have made me giggle if I still did that sort of thing. He looked as though he wanted to say something, but he simply gave a little bow.

Brendan came out, took one look at us, and grinned. "Five days," he said. "That's the most I can give you."

Drake gave him a sharp look then brushed past me. As he left, he whispered, "Stay safe."

I watched him until a group of his soldiers fell into step behind him and hid his retreating back from view. I looked at Brendan. "What was that about?"

"He's going home."

"What? Now?"

Brendan nodded. "He's going back to his court to rally his troops. He's sending them with you to the Darkside."

I frowned. "I thought he didn't believe me about the ships."

"He doesn't _want_ to believe that."

"So why is he helping?"

Brendan laughed and put his arm across my shoulders. "Did you really think he'd watch my men leave with you and not try to outdo me?"

But I wondered if Drake just wanted to face off against Sadler sooner rather than later.

Part of the deception about Scarlet's presence in the castle involved a lot of visits to Fiadh's quarters and not only by me. Dymphna had been forced to remain behind to keep up appearances, and I began to run into her more frequently.

"Thanks for sticking around," I told her the first time we met after Drake left. "It must suck for you to be near, you know, a rival court."

Dymphna took a seat next to me. I couldn't help noticing the lightness in her shoulders compared to the first time we had met. Even her hair and eyes seemed to be shifting into more vibrant red-toned hues as she shed the memories of her actions while under the control of Sadler.

A soft smile curved her lips as she watched Eithne, who was playing with Setanta on the floor with Fiadh. "After our journey together, I can't view this place in those terms. I'm not particularly welcome here, but I respect Brendan and the others. My loyalty to Drake doesn't change that."

When Sadler had kidnapped Eithne, I had only caught a glimpse of her. Her hair had lengthened into wheat-coloured curls, and she had grown taller, though she still had that baby face.

I nodded at her. "She seems happy. She's a sweet kid."

"She wasn't abused by Sadler's people," Dymphna said. "If anything, they treated her with a lot of care."

"I can imagine." I held up a lock of my black hair. "I fit in, but she must have stood out."

Dymphna gave me a steady look. "And do you now see this place as a rival court?"

I sighed. "I don't know what to think anymore. I just want my daughter to be safe."

Fiadh came over and sat on the other side of me. "What are we talking about?"

"Cara misses her daughter." Dymphna shook her head. "And I know how she feels. How times have changed."

"Indeed," Fiadh said with a little laugh. "If my mother could see me now, doting on a child..."

"That's not a thing then?" I asked.

"No, children are usually sent away from their mothers at birth. Love is weakness." Fiadh put a hand to her mouth as she looked at her son. "And how we've been missing out."

I gaped at her. "Really? All children?"

"The important ones," Dymphna clarified. "Lesser blooded creatures tend to have litters. They're happier if the strongest survives. Less mouths to feed. But for many of us, a child is something we own and keep at a distance. No feelings involved."

"Both of you have feelings for your kids," I said. "I see the way you look at them, the way you are with them."

Dymphna smiled. "You can thank my husband for that. It's part of the reason my people hated him actually. He wasn't just a human. He was soft." She made a face. "He refused to let me send that child away. When I saw him hold her for the first time, something inside of me broke. I had been changing since I met him, in truth, but he taught me how to love my child. He was a good father, and he idolised her. I wish she could remember him."

"It was Sadler's fault that I changed," Fiadh said. "He forced Setanta and me to remain together. Setanta was all I had, and I couldn't help loving him. I could almost hear the disapproval of my ancestors in our home, but I couldn't stop. It was impossible to take care of him and not want to keep him safe. But that's not the faery way."

"I hear the lost tribes take care of their own young," Dymphna said.

"They're savages," Fiadh scoffed.

"So what does that make you?" I asked smartly. "I suppose I don't see what's so weak about love."

"Because when your heart is taken away, it leaves you vulnerable," Dymphna explained. "In my case, it led me to work on Sadler's behalf. My weakness enabled him to control me."

"But you helped us afterward," I said. "You did the right thing."

"Because my dignity was returned to me. I want to see Sadler die for his crimes," Dymphna said fiercely. "It's not for the good of the realm, not even for the good of my own king. Revenge is all I want. My husband was murdered so Sadler could take advantage of me. I want to see the life leave Sadler's eyes. I want him to see me as he dies, to know he's lost everything because of his own mistakes."

"Look at my son," Fiadh said bitterly. "Sadler's doing. You're not the only one who wants to see his crimes catch up with him."

The two women gazed at each other, connected by the hatred of the man who had ruined their lives. Well, they weren't the only ones.

"I'm going to do it," I said under my breath. "The only way I can protect Scarlet from Sadler is to kill him. This is my chance. Brendan and Drake are sending soldiers with me, but Brendan has doubts. He still thinks there's another way." I stared at my hands. "There isn't. All I have to do is get close enough to talk to Sadler. I took his eye. I took his son. Now I need to finish the job." It was a relief to get it off my chest, to finally speak the words aloud.

"You'll die," Fiadh whispered. "They'll kill you before you have a chance to escape."

"Then I'll need people to make sure Scarlet stays hidden."

Fiadh glanced at Dymphna then shrugged. "I'm coming with you."

"Are you crazy?" I asked.

"She's right," Dymphna said. "We have to come with you."

"I have a chance to get away after it's done," I said. "The more people there are with me, the riskier it will be."

"Safety in numbers," Fiadh said. "Darksiders by your side is a sign."

"So is a daoine sídhe," Dymphna said. "There's a chance the Darkside army won't turn on you with us there."

Fiadh stood, her eyes bright with excitement. "They might see this as the key to their freedom. This could change everything. _We_ could change everything. Cara, if you can do what the men cannot..."

"You can't say a word to anyone," I said. "You can't let anyone know."

Fiadh took my hand. "Nobody will know. You have my word."

Dymphna knelt before me with a determined look on her face. "I vow to keep this silent. And when the time comes, if we can't get you away, we'll ensure your daughter's safety."

I swallowed hard. Somehow, I had done it. I had told the truth and gathered allies. But that meant everything was on my shoulders. And I wasn't even sure I could get close enough to Sadler to do a thing against him.

# Chapter 11

I had taken a chance on Fiadh and Dymphna, and I couldn't be sure whether that bet would pay off or blow up in my face. The only things I could control were my own actions, and I needed to learn as much as I could about what was going on. Trust had become a luxury, and the time to act was fast approaching. But the three of us were united by one factor: hating Sadler. If I had to, I would take advantage of that.

I had four full days before I could leave again—four days in which I could be part of Brendan's court and listen to what went on. On the first morning, a perverse part of me decided to wear a lot of black. I had the rings; I had the colour scheme. All I was missing were the twisted crown and maniacal laugh.

I stepped out of my room and walked straight into the chest of a tall faery I vaguely recognised from when he lurked over Brendan's shoulder on occasion. I looked up at him and frowned. "Traffic coming this way, faery. Move it."

He grinned, his periwinkle eyes twinkling. "I'm to escort you wherever you go. King's orders."

"The king can—wait a second. You're _his_ bodyguard. So who's protecting him?"

"Haven't you seen the size of him? He's more than capable of protecting himself." He leaned closer and whispered, "That's why he's the king."

"Funny. Now get out of my way." I tried to move around him.

He sidestepped to remain in front of me. I took a deep breath, wondering if his being there was some kind of sick punishment for my being a smartarse to Brendan since the day I met him.

Shaking my head, I turned sideways and slid past the faery. I strode a few feet down the hall before realising the bodyguard was following me. Each step he took made clanking sounds as his apparently steel-toed boots hit the floor. I spun and glared at him. He raised his eyebrows, still grinning.

I stamped my foot. "Are you kidding me? How are you supposed to sneak up on people when you're so bloody loud?"

"Oh, I'm not supposed to sneak. I'm supposed to make sure everyone is aware who is with you." He looked smug. "That's all it takes."

"You're that scary?"

"Scarier."

"Really?" I looked him up and down. With his athletic runner's body, he looked quick, and he had to be strong, but his wings were the girliest I had seen yet. As I watched, the wings quickened, and the periwinkle faded in and out as some kind of sparkle tried to take over the colour.

I smirked. "Your wings look like they belong on a My Little Pony figure. You're not even carrying a sword. I mean, have you ever met Arlen? You're not exactly the bogeyman, kid."

"Kid?" He choked out a surprised laugh. "I'm older than you, human."

"Human _queen_ , brony."

He flexed his arms to show off his biceps. "And I could take Arlen."

"What are you going to do? Distract him with the sparkle then kick him to death?"

He frowned then whipped out two small daggers from under his waistcoat. He crossed his arms then jerked them back in a slicing motion. "I like to go for the throat."

"Good to know," Arlen said from behind the faery. "At least now I can watch out for that."

The faery jumped about a foot in the air, his cheeks flooding with colour. "Sir, I—"

"Get out of here, Bran. Make sure her path is clear."

Bran nodded, his wings drooping a little. All of the sparkle had disappeared, and the periwinkle had deepened. He put away his daggers in one swift motion then ran his hand through his floppy, blue-tipped blond hair. When he passed me, he made a face. I stuck out my tongue in response.

"Making friends?" Arlen asked gruffly as he moved to my side. He hadn't spoken to me unless absolutely necessary since my return without Anya. He was still pissed, and I couldn't blame him.

"As always."

"I take it you're making your way to court this morning."

I lifted my shoulders slightly. "Thought it would be good to stay in the loop."

He led the way, his back impossibly straight.

"So," I said, feeling the weight of the awkward silence, "is Bran... trustworthy?"

"He's a boy, but he's reliable. You won't be harmed under his care."

"I don't need a bodyguard."

"You were almost killed the other day."

I sighed. "Brendan and I were alone, miles away from protection. If they wanted to kill us, surely that would have been the perfect time."

"Dubh," he said after a moment's hesitation. "He can outrun any danger."

"The first arrow could have gotten to either of us. I've been hit with an arrow while galloping away on a horse, Arlen. An experienced archer isn't going to miss a stationary target. You know I'm right."

"Then what are you saying? That they weren't trying to hurt you? Why would the Darksiders send a warning shot?"

"Maybe it wasn't Darksiders."

He stopped walking and stared at me, a frown deepening the lines in his face. "Then who?"

"What if it was somebody who wanted us to think the Darksiders are attacking?"

He looked confused, then his expression cleared. "You mean Drake. Do you ever _not_ leave a trail of destruction in your wake?"

"I was just—"

"No!" He pushed me against the wall, his dark eyes flashing with anger. "You will _not_ drive a wedge between them. Your issues with Drake are your own. I won't let you jeopardise everything that Brendan is working toward."

I looked him in the eye, not even a little afraid. "And if I'm right?"

He exhaled harshly and backed away from me. "You had better pray you're not unless you want Brendan to be the king he once was. This isn't something he could ever tolerate. And trust me, Cara, that king wouldn't tolerate this indulgence of you, either." He turned his back to me and headed for the stairs, calling over his shoulder, "Let's go."

I followed him downstairs to where Bran was waiting. Behind Arlen's back, he made another face at me. I let out a snort then strode after Arlen into Brendan's great hall. I inhaled the aroma of black roses as I strode toward the head of the room. Whispers echoed in my wake. When I reached the king, he was grinning as if he knew what I was about to say.

"What's with my shadow?" I demanded.

"I thought you'd enjoy the gift," Brendan said innocently. "Aren't you getting along well?"

I glanced at Bran, who didn't bother to hide his smirk. "Swimmingly. Did you personally train him to be annoying?"

"I have no idea what you mean," Brendan said. Then his expression turned serious. "I think it's best that you have someone watching your back."

"What about _your_ back?"

"Arlen's with me most of the time. This is simply a precaution."

"I need my space."

"He won't be too intrusive. It's more for show, in case anyone gets any ideas."

"I don't like it."

"Duly noted. Now take a seat. You skipped the queue."

I plopped into a chair against one wall of the room. I was aware of Bran loitering nearby, but he didn't try to sit next to me, so I could live with that. It wasn't that I disliked him; I just wanted to have frank conversations without a king's loyal servant listening to my every word.

Most of that day was consumed with people making complaints about the Darksiders encroaching on territory that didn't belong to them. There were a few reports of violence, though. Later, there were messages from the lineage consultant about potential brides for Brendan, but the king didn't share the news with anyone near me. I almost forgot about Bran.

But I couldn't forget about Drake and my suspicions.

The day before Drake was due to return, there was a commotion at the doors of the great hall. The crowd who normally stood there waiting for an audience with the king parted as if by instruction. Vix strode into the room, her black clothing marking her as other. She looked almost exactly as she had the very first time she entered Brendan's hall. Her black hair was clipped short except for the lock that fell across her temple. Her black leather outfit showed off strong legs, and her lips were blood red. Her sole earring bobbed as she approached Brendan. I felt her misery seep into the room, but I welcomed it as familiar.

I jumped to my feet and walked toward her, but Bran stepped into my path. Brendan rose from his thrown, one hand on the hilt of his sword.

Vix scowled at Brendan. "Please. I wish to speak to my queen."

I gave Bran a little push. "Out of the way, Bran."

"Cara," Brendan said in a warning tone.

"I know her," I said. "I trust her."

Vix let out a little gasp. "Don't say that, human. People will start questioning my reputation."

"Brendan," I said impatiently, "am I your prisoner now?"

He rolled his eyes. "Step back, Bran. Indulge the prisoner."

I made a face at Brendan, shoved Bran, then strode over to Vix. "Why are you here?" I whispered. "What's happening?"

"Same as before. I'm requesting you return before all hell breaks loose. Is that a problem?"

"You think I'm going to go back there with you? And am I supposed to sit in a locked tower until Sadler and his doctor feel like a little entertainment?"

"If Sadler sees you and your child, he may call off the ships. You don't understand. He's done something terrible, I think."

"I already know."

"You do?" She blinked rapidly. "What have you heard?"

"That he's made a deal with a god. That the ships might be... full of dead people."

She released a slow hiss. "The fool. We have to stop him."

"I'm leaving soon. I'm going to the Darkside."

"Come with me now."

"I can't." I sighed. "Just wait with me for a couple of days. We'll go to Sadler, and I'll try to talk to him."

"With the child."

"Not gonna happen."

"Don't be foolish," she whispered. "It's the child he really wants. You're a means to an end... mostly."

"Mostly?"

"The court wants you back. The people want you back. Sadler's disgusted, but he won't kill you. He can't afford to. The people are hungry and tired and scared. They're openly rebelling against him, and he has to do what he can to appease them. But having you by his side will only do so much. You need to bring the child with you. You know we won't hurt her."

"But _he_ would, Vix. He's unstable. He doesn't care what his people want. You know that, don't you?"

Conflicted emotions crossed her face. "I wish it had turned out differently." She leaned in and kissed me on the lips. "I'm sorry."

I was so stunned that I didn't move as she walked away. As she made it to the door, I realised my lips were tingling. I brushed my mouth with my fingers, which caused my fingertips to start tingling, too.

"Oh, shit," I whispered.

I took two stumbling steps after Vix then sank to my knees. Someone began yelling, but the buzzing in my ears grew to a crescendo that blocked out all other sound. I dropped the rest of the way, unable to control my body. I felt hands on me, but I could only lie on the floor, staring at black flowers that seemed to signify death. My breathing slowed, and the paralysis overcame me.

Shadows flew past me, probably Brendan's men in pursuit of Vix. _That bitch!_ I tried to move my lips, my fingers, anything, but I was turning to stone. I felt it creep across my skin and harden. Brendan knelt beside my head.

"No!" somebody screamed. "I can help her!"

"Cara trusts her," Grim said.

"I don't!" Brendan snapped.

"We don't have a choice." Grim's voice was low and calm, soothing me. I focused on him. He was the only person not panicking. "If we don't act soon, Cara could die. We don't know what this poison is."

"The Miacha will—"

Grim interrupted to say, "She won't be back until tomorrow at earliest. Cara could be suffering right now."

"Fine." Brendan stood. "Let her through."

Fiadh rushed over and crouched beside me. Her arms moved, but I couldn't see what she was doing. "She came for the child," Fiadh said. "When she realised the child was never here, she left. She gave me the antidote. She didn't want to kill Cara. It was just a distraction. Vix was desperate to—"

"I don't care," Brendan said gruffly. "Is it working?"

"It could take time." Fiadh shook her head. Her face was pale, and she looked as if she were about to throw up. "She didn't say much else."

A crowd of fae surrounded me, their voices loud and argumentative. I thought I felt a tingle in my toes and tried to move them. My fingertips were next. I couldn't tell if I was doing anything, then Brendan shouted in my face that my hand was moving. Inwardly grimacing, I concentrated on other parts of my body.

Air suddenly rushed into my lungs. They felt so dry that it hurt to breathe. I had a moment of panic when I couldn't exhale, but the paralysis was abating, and I was soon able to open my mouth.

"Water," I croaked.

I needed fluid as much as I needed oxygen. I coughed, and everything inside me hurt. I froze, half-afraid I would break something.

Brendan lifted me into his arms and carried me out of the hall. "Grim, Fiadh, fetch anything you think she might need."

I stared at his jaw as he carried me up the stairs. He was massively pissed. We reached my room, and somebody outside my line of sight opened the door.

Brendan walked in and laid me on my bed. When he caught me looking at him, he tried to smile. "What am I going to do with you, eh?"

I made a weak attempt to shrug. With a sigh, Brendan sat next to me. Faeries invaded my quarters, but I was too tired to care. Fiadh perched on my other side and helped me take a drink of water. After a couple of sips, my throat felt less like a sandy beach.

"Well, that was a new experience," I said once my throat was lubricated enough to speak.

"Did you know about this?" Brendan asked Fiadh.

She looked shocked. "No! Of course not."

"Am I supposed to believe that?"

"Leave her alone," I murmured.

"Everyone, leave," Brendan commanded. "Fiadh, wait in your room. I'll need to speak to you when I'm done here." He glared at her back as she left.

"You're such a bully," I said when everyone was gone. I sat up against the pillows. "She saved me, remember?"

"Maybe she was in on the plan."

"Or maybe she wasn't."

"I don't like having Darksiders here."

I groaned. "I'm a Darksider."

"No, you're a human who frequently gives me minor heart attacks." He brushed my fringe away from my face. "We reacted too late. I should never have let you near her. It was foolish. You need more protection around you."

"I didn't need protecting from Vix. It was a dick move that I need to pay her back for, but I'm pretty sure she was trying to do what she thought was best. Scarlet's not even here. There's nothing to worry about."

"But now the Darksiders know the child isn't here. They could track her down."

I frowned. "Vix won't tell Sadler."

He threw his hands up in frustration. "You won't trust me, but you'll trust the woman who gave you a toxic kiss."

I giggled. "I was wondering what the hell she was doing. Sneaky, eh?"

"It's not funny. She could just as easily have killed you."

"The fact that she didn't says a lot."

He stared at me. "Seriously. What am I going to do with you, Cara?"

"Admire me from afar." I reached out and gave his arm a little push. "I'm fine. I'm getting up now."

"You're not."

"What are you, my dad? I just told you I feel fine."

He groaned. "Sometimes, what I like about you is what drives me mad."

I widened my eyes. "Ditto."

His lazy grin returned. "And you call _me_ annoying?"

"Can we quit with the bodyguard stuff now?"

"Ha! After that? Not a chance. You're about to undertake a journey in the faery realm. You'll need more protection than ever."

A sinking feeling started in my stomach. "What does that mean?"

His smile turned wolfish. "It means I'm coming with you."

I rolled over and sat on the edge of the bed. "I don't think so."

He got to his feet and came around to stand over me, a dare in his eyes. "And why not?"

Because he would stop me from doing what I really wanted. But I couldn't tell him that. "If it goes wrong, somebody has to fix things. If Sadler's ships arrive, somebody has to make sure..." I took a deep breath. "You know you can't come with me."

He leaned over and rested his hands on the bed on either side of my hips. "You know I won't let you go without me. Why do you make everything so hard?"

He was close enough to kiss, and I had to remind myself to breathe. If I didn't fight that feeling, I would never be able to go behind his back and deal with Sadler.

Brendan didn't seem to notice my discomfort. "This is our fight. My people need to see their king act instead of hiding in his castle. I need this."

I laid my hands on his shoulders and pushed him back so I could stand. "Go be a king, Brendan."

He hesitated, a flicker of emotion crossing his face. "Bran's outside. Get some rest."

He turned to leave. I followed him to the door and watched him walk down the corridor. When he looked over his shoulder, he grinned, but it didn't reach his eyes.

I looked to the right to see Bran sitting on the floor, looking miserable. "What's with you, cupcake?"

He looked up at me like a puppy who had been caught ripping up furniture. "I failed."

I tried not to laugh. "I'm alive, aren't I?"

"I should have killed her before she could touch you. I should have known better."

"Trust me. If Vix wanted to kill me, she wouldn't have done it in front of everybody like that."

"Then why did she come here?"

I thought about it. "Because the Darksiders need a hero."

"The Darksiders are savages."

I held out my hand. "Congratulations. You're guarding the queen of the savages."

A slow smile spread across Bran's face as he shook my hand.

"Now get back to work, kid." I closed the door behind me as he gave a disparaging snort.

I pressed my forehead against the door, and the nonchalant mask fell away. I was terrified. I wished I knew where my daughter was at that second.

# Chapter 12

I stared into the fire, panicking about my daughter. Someone knocked on the door, but I ignored it, hoping whoever it was would go away and leave me to my worries. Vix knew Scarlet wasn't with me, and so did Bart. Too many people knew.

A second, more urgent knock made me get to my feet. I opened the door and started with surprise. Drake stood there, his long, silver hair tied back from his face in a low pony-tail. The hems of his trousers were covered in dried mud.

"Cara." The way he said my name was a caress, and for a split second, I forgot everything else. "Can I come in?" His furtive glance to the right broke the haze.

I stepped aside. "My room isn't going to be raided by an angry banshee this time, is it?"

His back stiffened, but he stepped into the room. "The troops and... their queen are on their way. I rode ahead when I heard the news."

I closed the door, unsure of his mood. When he looked at me, his violet eyes were feverish.

"Are you okay?" I asked in spite of myself.

"I heard the Darksiders attacked." He took a step toward me. "Are _you_ all right?"

"According to you, the Darksiders are constantly attacking. Why the panic?"

His expression flattened, hiding whatever he was feeling. "An attack by an enemy in a king's great hall is cause for alarm."

"It wasn't an attack. It was an act of desperation." I tried to move past him, but he grabbed my arm. I gave an exasperated sigh to cover the warmth rushing through my veins at his touch. I would never learn. "Look, it was only a distraction."

"While she looked for... your daughter."

I shoved him. Surprised, he stumbled back a step, but he hadn't let go of my arm, so I fell against him. He wrapped his arms around me and held me to his chest to steady me. I breathed in his scent, half-afraid to move. But I had to move. For my own sake. I laid my palms on his chest and gave a gentle push.

He released me instantly. "You're angry," he said, as if that were the last emotion I should be feeling.

"Well, there was no immaculate conception, so I get kind of pissy when my partner in crime denies _our_ daughter."

He let out a hiss of air. "Cara, you have to see—"

"I see everything. First, you thought you were dying. I was there. Then, you were about to make a massive commitment to a daughter of death. And, oh, yeah, I was there again. One last fling with a stupid human who was probably losing her mind makes perfect sense. You're a liar and a—"

With one step, he closed the space between us and held my cheeks in his hands. "I didn't tell you everything because I thought it would hurt more. I thought you would be free. I never thought there could be a child. And then you came back to the most dangerous place for you."

"So it's _my_ fault?"

"No!" His face creased with pain. "I never lied to you back then." He looked older and wearier. I wondered whether that had come from time or from wearing a crown.

A part of me longed to believe him, but still, he had lied since then. I didn't see how I could ever trust him again.

He pressed his forehead against mine. I squirmed, and when he stepped back, his mask had returned.

"This is the only way I can help you," he said gruffly.

"This isn't helping me," I whispered.

He blinked then turned and walked out of the room.

My sleep was restless, so I gave up and got up early to go for a walk. Bran was snoring on the floor to the right of my door. I wondered if Drake had done something to him. I thought about leaving Bran there but decided I didn't want to get him into trouble with Brendan. I kicked his boot. He jumped about a foot in the air, rubbing his eyes as he tried to wake up properly.

"I'm going for a walk," I said. "Just... letting you know."

I walked away, frowning when I heard the sound of Bran clumping after me. He kept his distance, though. Outside, I was about to step into the gardens when I heard a rumbling sound.

Bran grabbed my shoulder. "Back inside."

"It's probably the Silver troops arriving. No big deal."

"That's a lone carriage. Inside. Now!"

A warning bell rang. The soldiers at the gate came to attention. As Bran tried to lead me back inside, I caught a glimpse of a mud-splattered carriage pulled by an exhausted-looking dappled grey horse.

"No flags," a soldier murmured as he jogged out of the castle.

My heart had begun to race. "Wait," I said, shrugging off Bran's hand. "Just wait a minute."

I recognised that carriage. It had brought me to Brendan's castle a long time ago. Nobody had seen us then. The carriage stopped, and a black streak flew out of the window and landed on four feet.

"Bekind!" I shrieked and broke into a run.

The cat stayed put. I pushed past grabbing hands, leaving Bran in the dust. I didn't care about anything but reaching that carriage. The horse was sweating profusely, its eyes wild. The carriage door was streaked with blood.

"Bekind?" I whispered, slowing as I neared.

I glanced back to see Brendan and Arlen coming toward me at a run. With shaking hands, I opened the door and looked inside the carriage. Smears of blood stained the floor. The faery who had taken me to Brendan when I was pregnant lay on the left seat, his arms crossed over his chest. His shirt had been ripped open, revealing a gory stomach wound.

"Help!" I shouted. "We need help!"

On the right bench, Líle was holding Zoe in her lap. Líle's hair stuck straight up, and her face was splattered with blood. Zoe had a black eye, and her hands were violently trembling. In the corner of the seat, Anya huddled with a bundle clutched in her arms. Her eyes were wide as they rolled seemingly everywhere at once.

Swallowing hard, I reached for the bundle. Anya shook her head and held on.

"Anya," I whispered, "it's safe. You're safe. You're home. Give her to me."

She was still shaking her head when I took the warm bundle out of her arms. I opened the blanket to see my daughter's peaceful sleeping face. A flush coloured her cheeks, and her thumb was in her mouth.

The relief almost sent me reeling. Somebody held me from behind, but I didn't look at anyone but my daughter. I pressed a kiss against her forehead and brushed her black hair away from her face, letting my fingertips linger on the patch of pure silver. Her hair looked longer, and her face had narrowed, losing some of the baby fat. I had already missed so much in such a short time. But she was safe. She was with me again, and everything would be okay. I breathed in my daughter's scent, barely aware of what was going on around me.

"Get them inside. Now!" Brendan barked.

Soldiers milled around us, providing a shield in case any attackers came near. But the woods were still, and the only sounds came from Brendan's people.

"Cara, it's cold," Drake said. "Take her in—"

Scarlet's eyes fluttered open. More asleep than awake, she didn't even look around before her lids closed again.

Drake stared at her, motionless, and I realised with a start that it was the first time he had laid eyes on her. Unsure of what else to do, I brushed past him and briskly walked to the castle, shadowed by Bran. I headed for the stairs, but Bran guided me toward Brendan's office instead.

"He wants to contain us." Bran spoke quietly. "Best to keep everyone together until we know what happened."

We were the first in the office. I sat on the edge of a chair and swayed, holding my baby and feeling a sense of completeness I had missed when we were separated.

"So she was never here," Bran said flatly.

I ignored him. Brendan came in seconds later, leading Zoe. She broke away from him and flew to my side. Drake followed them.

I wrapped my free arm around Zoe. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "I don't know what you went through, but I'm so sorry."

She blew out a shaky breath. "Faeries are freaking scary, Cara."

I looked at Brendan. He was giving commands with a hard glint in his eyes. "I know."

Bekind, in her cat form, jumped onto Zoe's lap. My human friend didn't so much as flinch. Bekind brushed her ears against my knuckles, but I was too busy watching Arlen carry Anya into the office. Líle strode in as if in a fury, a spark of life in her eyes and skin. She looked more alive than she had since we'd crossed the Black Marshes.

"Wake everyone," Brendan said. "Set up extra patrols."

"My troops are on their way," Drake replied. "We don't want to unnecessarily spark something."

Brendan glared at him, and I saw a different side to that particular king.

Two soldiers carried in the injured faery from the carriage. He didn't struggle, but I saw his lips moving. Servants brought in blankets, hot drinks, water, and bandages. They immediately set to tending to the wounded faery.

Minutes later, one servant kneeling beside the faery looked up and said, "This is the best we can do until the Miacha shows up. She's due today. If she doesn't arrive by mid-morning, we'll need to send for more help."

As the servants filed out, leaving the hurt faery resting on a blanker, Grim and Realtín slipped in. They made a beeline for Scarlet.

"A baby," Realtín whispered. "A real live baby." She flew around the room, sending streams of light behind her.

"Is he going to be okay?" I asked Brendan.

Brendan nodded, but his jaw was tight, and I realised he wasn't ready to talk yet. He went back to making plans with his guards.

"He's the one who brought me here," I murmured to Zoe. "You didn't see him last time."

"I definitely did this time." Zoe pinched my arm. "It's my fault he was hurt."

"No," I said firmly.

She leaned against me and almost imperceptibly nodded at Drake. "I take it that's the real baby daddy over there."

"Yep, but Brendan is who you talked to at the club."

Brendan looked over at us, his expression unreadable. Then, he took a seat at his desk and held out his hands. "Líle, perhaps it's time for an update."

Líle nodded. "We left Cara's grandparents' home the morning after you did. We went on the road, moving constantly, and kept a low profile. Everything was fine. Nobody followed. We steered clear of known fae, and Bekind was able to steer us away from the lost fae. Two days ago, the first attack came."

"Darksiders?" Drake asked.

"I think so. It was only one, and I dealt with her. We moved on immediately. The next attack came a couple of hours later. That time, there were three of them. Zoe—" she cleared her throat. "I mean, _the human_ burned one with boiling water then hid the baby while I fought the others. Anya was out looking for supplies. Another attacker followed her back. She and Bekind took care of that one. We decided the human realm was too dangerous since somebody was apparently able to track us down all of a sudden, so we figured the safest bet was to return the child to her mother. We went to the nearest portal, but they were waiting for us. There was a fight. The human remembered how Cara found the faery realm last time and repeated what Cara had said back then as well as she could remember. A carriage showed up"—she jerked a thumb toward the unconscious faery—"and he helped us but got himself injured in the process. We fled, covered by his magic, but as he weakened, so did his power. We were in plain sight for the last part of the journey. There was one more attack. We survived. They didn't." She shrugged. "And now we're here."

Brendan gave me a knowing look, obviously thinking Vix was to blame, but I wasn't so sure. There was no way could she have found Scarlet so quickly. Somebody else had to be involved.

"Zoe can't stay here," I blurted. "She's not used to the magic. It's dangerous."

"We can't let her leave," Brendan said harshly. "If we send her back, any fae could torture her for information."

"And if she loses her mind?"

"Then she can never leave!" he bellowed.

I flinched.

"Enough," Drake said. His tone was soft and non-threatening, but fury twisted Brendan's expression.

"You don't command me," the redheaded king said.

Drake's gaze didn't falter. "Nor you, me. And we certainly don't command Cara, whether we like it or not. You and I can fix this in only one way. So I'm going with Cara when she leaves to face Sadler. I'm taking my soldiers, and I'm facing him with her. It's time we finished this, once and for all. Are you with me or against me, Brendan?"

Drake offered his hand to Brendan. I held my breath.

What seemed like an eternity passed before Brendan lifted his hand and took Drake's. "Yet another adventure, my friend."

"What about Scarlet?" I asked. "Where's a safe place for her?"

Brendan gave me a look that was more of an apology than anything else. "In your arms."

I glanced down at my daughter, surprised by how relieved I felt. The pretence was over, and I could have her again. But I had two united kings at my back. Perhaps we actually stood a chance.

"Are you going to leave the castle undefended?" Grim asked.

Brendan shook his head. "We're taking a fight to the Darkside, but I won't let my subjects be molested behind my back. Grim, you must remain behind."

A war of emotions was fought on Grim's face. "Cara needs—"

"My people need you. You're calm. You'll ensure nobody panics." Brendan gave the brownie a small smile. "Will you stay? Will you take charge of the court in my absence?"

Grim looked at me, misery in his eyes. I nodded at him, but I had a lump in my throat. I really did need him, but the Green Court needed him more. Brendan was right to choose Grim.

"You should stay," I whispered. "Just in case."

Grim's shoulders sagged, but he spoke his agreement.

A commotion outside the room caught everyone's attention.

"What now?" Brendan asked.

Dymphna opened the door and popped her head in. "The news has spread, and the... Darksiders wish to meet their princess."

Everyone suddenly looked uncomfortable.

Brendan's gaze held a cold fury, but he gestured toward me. "It's your choice."

"It's okay with me, I suppose," I said hesitantly, not really sure what would happen. But I was curious to find out. It was our first test.

Dymphna led Fiadh in by the arm. Conn followed, a sleepy Setanta in his arms.

Fiadh's hands flew to her mouth. "I... may we see her? Just for a moment?"

I nodded, suddenly afraid. Fiadh got down on her knees and half-crawled toward us. Zoe's hand clutched mine. I squeezed back, the hairs on the back of my neck standing up.

When Fiadh reached us, she peered at Scarlet. Her eyes were bright and shining. "She's what we've been waiting for." She inched away. "Bring him. Bring him here."

Still holding Setanta, Conn approached and dropped to one knee next to Fiadh. Setanta looked at my daughter. I pitied him. He was covered in black welts, and she was so obviously perfect. It must have been hard for them to see her, but Fiadh couldn't stop smiling.

"Kiss her hand," Fiadh told her son. "Like I taught you. She's your princess. You're her servant forever more."

The look in Fiadh's eyes repulsed me, but I swallowed my protest. Hers was the reaction I needed if I was going to win against Sadler.

Setanta reached out and touched Scarlet's curled hand. She woke at the touch, looking curiously at the boy she had never seen, the boy whose mother had just declared him her servant. A horrified look crept across Setanta's face as he stared at Scarlet's hand. I followed his gaze. A shadow of black brushed across her skin then disappeared. I yelped and inched away from the boy, holding Scarlet out of his reach.

"What is it?" Fiadh demanded. "What happened?"

"I need..." I gulped. "I need to speak to... people. Grim and... everyone. I need to talk... in my room. Now."

Conn and Fiadh retreated as I jumped to my feet. Setanta's eyes were feverish. He couldn't take his gaze away from my daughter, and I wanted to hide her away from his prying eyes.

"Zoe," I said breathlessly. "Anya, Bekind, Líle. In my room."

"Go," Brendan said. "Go hold court, Cara."

I turned to him, wondering what the hell he meant by that. I opened my mouth to ask him, but I wasn't sure I wanted to hear the answer in front of so many people. "Let me know if the Miacha turns up," I said, then I turned on my heel and strode out of the room with my daughter, followed by the people I could trust the most.

# Chapter 13

"You think she can cleanse him of the taint?" Bekind asked. She had a blanket gathered around her slender shoulders.

The others looked at me with a mix of horror and pride in their eyes.

I looked at Scarlet, who was playing on the floor with a soft toy I had brought from home to keep her scent with me. "No! I don't know. Maybe." Zoe had assured me that Scarlet hadn't seen the violence and deaths, but I was still worried. "We can't tell anyone."

"How can she do it?" Grim asked. "Can you? Can Drake? Is it inherited?"

I shook my head. "All I know is that she did the exact same thing that the wood I killed Deorad with managed to do. Maybe it was a fluke." I stared at my hands, wondering if holding the magical wood had done something to _me_. "Maybe it was the boy. Maybe he did something to her, accidentally tried to hurt her or something. Maybe... I don't know." I plopped down into a chair. "Some kind of magic protected her. The Miacha said she was covered with it at birth. Sorcha felt my baby dying inside me at the Dark Court. Someone or something is protecting her, and maybe everything that's happened has... maybe the combination of it all has done something to her. I have no idea. Don't any of you know?"

"It's not as though the taint has been studied," Grim said softly. "It doesn't even have an official name. We've been calling it so many things."

I caught sight of Realtín perched on the side of the bed, gazing at Scarlet as though my daughter were part of a freak show. "Stop it!" I shouted. "Stop looking at her like that."

Realtín frowned. "I can't help it."

"We should bring the boy here," Líle said. "Test out the theory."

"What if it hurts her? What if absorbing that black crap will kill her insides? What if she absorbs it and keeps it? Oh, my God! What if her eye changed because she was absorbing it from me all along?" I tried to calm down, but it was impossible. "What if somebody thinks she's the solution to the taint and buries her in the soil or something? What if—"

"Quiet!" Anya pressed her palms against her ears. "I can't bear to hear any more of this."

Zoe came over to stand next to me and rubbed my forearm. "Nobody knows anything."

I glanced at Scarlet again. "That boy saw it happen. I need to do something about him."

"Cara!" she said sharply.

I glared at her. "I'm not going to hurt him, Zo. I just need him to keep his mouth shut."

"He's a child and an invalid. Think about what you're saying."

I ran my hands through my hair. "I know. I'm a crazy person. But I'm supposed to be leaving to go to the Darkside tomorrow, and the first day my daughter arrives in the faery realm, she starts soaking up the taint from somebody else. What will happen if she stands on Darkside soil? I can't handle this many problems at once."

"This isn't a problem," Bekind said. "Not until you make it one. This could be the answer to turning the Darksiders to our side. You saw how that woman knelt at your daughter's feet. She called her a princess. This is good news, Cara. This is protection."

"Or not," I whispered. "What if the Darksiders come for her again?"

"Then we'll be surrounded by two armies," Líle reminded me. "She's safe with you as long as you're with those soldiers. We'll deal with the taint when this threat is over."

"Shit! You don't know yet," I said. "I had a visit from a Darksider who told me that these ships on the way are full of dead things, that some kind of god resurrected them to fight Sadler's war for him."

She gaped at me. "How do we stop them?"

I squeezed my eyes shut. "Hopefully, by killing Sadler."

"And who's going to do that?" Bekind asked. Her tone said she already knew my answer.

Zoe yawned, giving me a chance to escape responding.

"We should rest," I said. "I want to spend some time with Scarlet, and we have a big journey ahead of us tomorrow."

"I'll find beds for everyone," Grim said. "I'll make sure food is brought up here, too."

"Zoe, stay with me?" I pleaded.

She sat in the chair next to mine. "Of course."

The others left, casting baleful glances back at us. When the food arrived, Zoe and I spread it out on the small table. I called Scarlet over to eat.

"We've been awake for pretty much two days," Zoe said. "Scarlet slept some, but she must be exhausted, too."

I held my daughter close and stroked her hair as she cuddled against me. I had been a little afraid she would forget me, but she seemed to have missed me.

"She looked for you," Zoe said. "I know Anya took care of her a lot, but Scarlet kept looking for you."

I tried not to feel happy about that. After we ate, we lay on my big bed together, Zoe and I holding hands while Scarlet dozed between us.

"You must have been terrified," I said. "When everything went down."

"I was scared for Scarlet, but I was too pissed off to be afraid until it was over. Then it hit me hard. That poor man, just bleeding out in front of us, and we couldn't do anything to help him. Anya freaked out, but Bekind was great. I thought he was going to die, but she kept calm."

"Thanks for protecting Scarlet." Tears formed in my eyes. "I thought she would be safe away from here, but people figured it out, obviously."

She squeezed my hand. "How have you been?"

"Frustrated. Angry. Sad. I'm the one who's going to lead an assassin right to Sadler. It's the only way to stop what's coming."

She frowned. "Do you really think you can do it?"

"I killed Deorad."

She gave me a wry smile. "From what Bekind tells me, you helped Deorad."

"That's the spin on the tale. It wasn't quite so noble. I hated him, too."

"This is so fucked up. I know you. You can't help them murder this man, no matter how much you hate him."

"We're not home, Zoe. This place changes you."

Pain flashed in her eyes. "I can see that. So where's Drake's wife then?"

"She'll be here later. If you see a dagger in my back, you'll know what happened."

"It must be tough... seeing him here."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "It is. Part of me is desperate to talk to him, but we can't have a conversation without arguing. I don't understand what's happened to all of us. I can't help thinking, 'What if?' If one little thing had been different, where would we be now? I've done everything wrong, Zoe."

"None of this is your fault," she said fiercely.

"I failed before I even got started. My baby doesn't have a dad. He's right there. He was in the same room as her, and he can't be a father to her. She's going to ask questions, wonder who her father is, and what am I supposed to say? It's that man you always see who pretends we don't exist?"

"Do you...?" She bit her lip. "Do you love him?"

"I feel everything, good and bad. Sometimes I think I made the biggest mistake, but then it's like... he's her dad, and you know I love her, no matter what, so I feel like I can't hate the person who gave her to me. I feel like I'm supposed to love him, but the way he behaves makes it impossible to even like him sometimes. And I think I'm a terrible person when I hate him because he's a huge part of her. It's like... if I hate him, am I saying I hate her, too? I don't understand how I feel. If it was just me, it would be clearer, but the three of us are connected in a way I can never change." I huffed out a breath. "What am I saying? It's never been clear."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I haven't a clue. I feel like I owe it to Scarlet to put us in Drake's crosshairs, to force him to really see us. But does she deserve that person, the person he's become? When this is over, am I supposed to walk away with her and pretend none of this happened? Can I hide her heritage from her? I'm not sure what will hurt her more, knowing he isn't capable of loving her or thinking he's never had the chance one way or another. I know what it's like to grow up with a missing piece. I don't want that for her."

"Forget Scarlet for a minute. What about you? What's in your heart? I know how hard it is for you to get close to people, especially men, but you're in this situation now, so you've had to adapt. How do you really feel about him?"

I lay back and thought about Drake, but Brendan's grin kept getting in the way. I shook my head. "I see two sides of him. One side is cold and heartless, only concerned with power. That's the part I want to protect us from. But the other part... I miss him. I wish I didn't have to go through this alone, and I'm just... I'm lonely, Zoe. I know that sounds lame, considering everything that's going on, but sometimes I wish I didn't have to sleep alone. I wish there was somebody I could turn to at the end of the day who would listen to me and not judge, somebody who didn't have their own agenda, so I could trust them completely. I wish I could just share these burdens because they're so freaking heavy sometimes."

"I get that. Seriously. After I split up with Darren, there were a couple of months when, if he called, I'd go running because I was lonely. But it didn't get me anywhere. You need to make a choice. Either you're all in, or you cut the ties. You just have to separate how _you_ feel from your worries about Scarlet. There's what's best for you, and then there's what's best for the kid. Those might not be the same thing, but they could be."

I blew out a shaky breath. "She's everything to me. I don't know how to separate." I rolled onto my side. "You know what's weird? The fae aren't supposed to feel, right? But when they came along, it was the first time _I_ really started to feel. I was more like them before I met them than I am now, and I just don't know what to do with all of these... _feelings_."

Zoe snorted. "You're such a girl."

"Whatever, biatch. I love you, and I'm not ashamed to say it."

We giggled then got caught up on what had happened since we separated. By the time I dozed off, I felt as if that burden had lifted just a little.

"Hey, Cara," Zoe called out, waking me up. "There's a boytoy at your door."

"What?" I mumbled.

I rolled out of bed. Zoe was holding Scarlet and grinning at Bran, who stood at the door with an impatient look on his face.

"I've been knocking for ten minutes," he complained.

"So?" I said, still half-asleep.

"So you wanted to know when the Miacha arrived. She's here now."

"Oh, right. Where is she?"

He sneered. "With the Darksiders."

I punched him in the arm. "You're looking at a couple of Darksiders. Give me a minute to get changed. Oh, wait. Have the Silver Court troops arrived yet?"

"Not yet," he said, rubbing his bicep. "But we've received word that the lineage consultant will be here this evening."

"Crapadoodle," I muttered. Zoe gave me a questioning glance, and I told her, "I'll explain later."

I ushered Bran out of the room, so I could freshen up a little and make sure Scarlet looked presentable. I told Zoe she could wait in the room, but she said she wasn't leaving my side, and I was grateful.

When I opened the door, Bran was stationed in the hallway. "You don't have to shadow me anymore," I told him.

He shrugged and followed us to Fiadh's room. Conn opened the door. He didn't look surprised to see me, but he didn't invite me in, either.

"I need to see the Miacha," I snapped, not in the mood for pushy men.

"Is that Cara?" Fiadh called. "Bring her in!"

I made a face at Conn before shoving him aside. The four of us joined Fiadh, Setanta, and the grey-eyed Miacha in the main living quarters. Conn huffed and moved to stand beside Fiadh.

Grey Eyes hugged me then cooed at Scarlet, who blinked at her a couple of times before grinning. "Oh, she knows us," Grey Eyes said, her entire face crinkling with the width of her smile.

"Um, yeah," I said. _Not likely._

"I've just been stitching up that poor guide," Grey Eyes said. "He's feeling much better now."

"So he'll live?" Zoe asked in an anxious tone.

Grey Eyes stared at my friend for a moment. "Oh, my. Another human in the Green Court. What fun the gossips will have. Yes, he'll live, my dear. Cara, may I hold the child?"

I hesitated before passing Scarlet over to her. She and her cohorts had helped us more than once, so I trusted her. I just didn't like having to hand Scarlet over when I had only gotten her back.

"One eye," Grey Eyes said, gazing down at my daughter. "That's all the taint she suffers."

I realized I had been staring at Setanta and quickly jerked my eyes away from him. "So it seems. Oh, I have a little of the taint, too."

After I said that, I cheered inside, because if Scarlet had some special cleansing power, then surely my veins wouldn't be black. I had made a mistake with the boy. Scarlet hadn't done anything.

"If the darkness spreads, come to me," Grey Eyes said.

I nodded. "What do you make of the boy? I gestured at Setanta without looking his way. "Will he recover?"

Grey Eyes frowned. "It's hard to say."

"He's improved so much," Fiadh said enthusiastically.

Grey Eyes handed Scarlet back to me. "Fiadh tells me you're heading back to the Darkside. Is that wise?"

"It might be the only way," I said.

"This might be forward, but may I come?" Grey Eyes asked. "I could keep an eye on the boy, and your daughter, and even your friend here."

I glanced at Zoe then asked Grey Eyes, "You can help her while she's here?"

"Perhaps. Mostly, I can warn you when she has been here too long, before it is too late."

"Yes," Zoe said. She looked at my expression and made a face. "Come on, Cara." She lowered her voice. "You need me. You need to remember who you really are, not what they call you."

I swallowed hard. I was the person who had murdered my own daughter's grandfather, no matter what name anyone gave me. "I'll... talk to Brendan about it, Zoe." I nodded at Grey Eyes. "I'm sure he would appreciate the Miacha on his team." I knew I would.

"I think my sisters can live without me for a while longer," the Miacha woman said with a knowing smile.

"Great." I plastered a fake smile on my face. "Looks like it's going to be one big happy family."

"Can you accompany me to the kings now?" Grey Eyes asked. "There's not much time to prepare."

I nodded, waved at Fiadh and Setanta, who was more alert and lively than I had ever seen him, and left with Bran, Scarlet, Zoe, and Grey Eyes.

Downstairs, in Brendan's office, Grim and Drake were having a lively conversation that ended abruptly as soon as I entered the room. Brendan stood to one side, looking amused.

"Um," I began, unsure of why there was so much tension in the room. "We wanted to discuss the trip to the Darkside. I need to bring Scarlet with me, so of course, everyone else has decided they need to come, too."

Drake frowned. "Exactly who is everyone?"

I grinned. "Me, Scarlet, Zoe, my Miacha friend here, Fiadh, Setanta, Conn, Dympha, Eithne, Anya, Bekind, and Líle. Oh, and I suppose my shadow over there, too." I gestured at the guard. Bran gave a weak little wave, looking embarrassed.

Brendan leaned against the wall, his eyes bright. "Am I being asked a request?"

I smirked. "We're just telling you so you aren't surprised by the number of people who leave here tomorrow."

Brendan rolled his eyes a little. "Of course you are. Drake and I have already agreed we're both going. Grim will be left in charge here, Sorcha will rule the Silver Court in Drake's absence, and the rest of us will try to make sure that Sadler's ships never land."

"If they exist," Drake added sharply.

Brendan waved his fingers. "Of course. That."

"And if everything does not go to plan?" Grim asked. "What will happen?"

"Conn, Líle, and Dymphna will shepherd the children and the others to safety," I said.

"But not you?" Drake asked.

I blinked rapidly. "Everything will go to plan."

# Chapter 14

Anya had been fidgeting for the last half hour.

I picked up a piece of crust Scarlet had dropped on the floor then paused to stare at my fae friend. "Why don't you go talk to him?"

She flinched. "I wouldn't even know what to say."

"Maybe he'll do the talking then."

"He hasn't tried yet."

Zoe nudged her. "He carried you in from the carriage."

"That was different." Anya sighed. "I'm afraid to knock on his door. What if he sends me away?"

"Do you want to sort things out?" Zoe asked.

"Of course I do." Anya bit her thumb, a mischievous look crossing her face. "Cara, do you mind if I take Scarlet for a walk?"

"A walk in which you might accidentally bump into loverboy?" I grinned. "Go. Use my daughter to talk to boys."

"I won't be long." She beamed as she fetched Scarlet's coat.

"Take Bran with you," I said. "He's waiting outside the door."

"I don't know if that's good or bad," Zoe said when Anya had left. "The whole men-standing-guard thing."

"It takes a while to get used to. Back when everything started, my first bodyguard tried to kill me, so Líle took over."

"You say that like it's nothing."

"Well, I didn't get hurt. My point is that warriors are supposed to protect the weak here. So even though it's kind of annoying to be the weak little female having to hide behind a man, over here, it isn't about gender. People like Líle and Dymphna are expected to do the protecting, too." But I had been working hard in the human realm to learn how to protect myself, and it still rankled that I was considered weak.

"Have you ever seen Líle fight?" Zoe's eyes widened. "She's like something out of a cartoon. In a really, really good way."

I laughed. "I'm sure."

Her cheeks flushed, so I decided not to pick on her too much. I wasn't sure what was going on between my friends, but a little life had returned to Líle, and for that I was grateful.

Zoe rummaged under the sofa cushions then pulled out Scarlet's hat. "Anya must have forgotten this."

I jumped up and took the hat from her. "It's freezing outside. I'm just going to pop downstairs after her. Hey, if you see Bekind, tell her I need to talk to her."

"I think she's spying," Zoe said breezily.

"Of course she is." I rolled my eyes then left the room.

On my way downstairs, I bumped into Bran. "Slacking off?" I asked.

He rubbed the back of his head. "I was kind of sent back up. Arlen's with Anya."

I held up the hat. "She forgot Scarlet's hat."

He looked at me blankly.

"It's cold," I said. "She needs her hat."

"I'll come with you," he said eagerly.

I tried not to smile as he ushered me down the stairs. "Feeling a little useless, Bran?"

He made a face. "Arlen is a legend, and there are enough stories about Líle to make anyone feel inadequate." He cleared his throat. "Not that I'm not... useful or... I'm just saying..."

"Don't worry about it. Nobody's perfect, no matter how many stories and legends people tell about them."

"There are quite a few stories about you, too."

I let out a short, sharp laugh. "I haven't done anything story-worthy, trust me."

In the main hallway, I heard shouting outside.

Bran swallowed hard. "Perhaps we should stay here and keep out of that?"

"Or not," I said, a little annoyed that Anya and Arlen were having a fight in front of my daughter.

"Sounds like the troops are arriving," Bran said as we neared the doors.

Outside, Anya and Arlen were verbally laying into each other, but Scarlet wasn't with them. The first set of soldiers was galloping on horseback across the courtyard.

"Scarlet?" I whispered, scanning the steps. I raced over to Anya. "Where's Scarlet?"

"What?" She spun around, her face falling. "Scarlet?"

A distant yowl from a cat caused my breath to hitch. I scanned the yard. My heart dropped when I spotted my daughter. She was toddling into the path of the oncoming horses.

"Scarlet!" I screamed, racing toward her.

I would never make it. The horses were too fast, hadn't seen her, couldn't stop even if they tried.

"Scarlet!"

I heard footsteps running behind me, but my eyes were on Scarlet as she slipped in the mud. She turned onto her hands and knees, and her eyes widened when she noticed me running toward her. The horses would reach her first.

My heart was in my mouth as I sprinted, screaming at the soldiers to stop. Some slowed, but others either ignored me or didn't hear. Right before hooves trampled my baby, a flash of silver crossed the mud. Scarlet was snatched into the air and moved to safety without a split-second to spare. Drake stood there, holding Scarlet with a dumbfounded look on his face. The baby seemed too stunned to cry as she stared up at her father with wondering eyes.

I ran the rest of the way to them, tears rolling down my cheeks. My hands ran across Scarlet's face in an attempt to make sure she was okay. Her lower lip trembled, but she didn't cry. I tried to take her, but Drake held on to both of us, shaking almost as hard as I was.

"She's safe," he murmured. "I have her. She's safe."

"They would have killed her. She could have..." A sob shook my entire body.

Drake put a finger under my chin, tilted my face up, and gazed into my eyes. "I will never let her come to harm. Do you understand me? Never."

I nodded shakily, unable to even speak anymore. My mind kept going to that bad place, the one where Drake hadn't saved her, the one where her broken body had been left lying in the mud. I wanted to throw up, but I swallowed my tears and tried to calm down for Scarlet's sake. It suddenly occurred to me that Drake had saved her. He had risked his own life to save my daughter.

He ran his thumb across my cheek then looked down at Scarlet. "She's beautiful," he said as if in awe. "I mean..."

He raised his head and appeared to notice that the rest of the world still existed. I followed his gaze and saw too many faeries staring at us. I shuddered violently.

"You're freezing," he said in a tight voice. "Take the child in to the warmth. I'll deal with this."

I bundled Scarlet into my arms. "Everything's okay," I whispered, as she clung to me. I walked blindly back to the castle.

As I passed Anya, she wrung her hands and cried, "Cara, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Ignoring her, I kept going, past Brendan and Líle, past Bran, past everyone who still stared. All I cared about was getting back into my room with Scarlet.

At the door to the castle, I glanced over my shoulder and saw Drake pulling soldiers off their horses. Brendan gazed at me, an unreadable expression on his face. I went inside, closely followed by Bran and a wailing Anya. I held Scarlet so tightly that she started to squirm to be free, but I couldn't let her go. Not now or ever.

Outside my room, I gripped Bran's arm. "Nobody's allowed in except Bekind."

He nodded and blocked Anya from following me. I went in and shut the door.

"Please, Cara." Anya banged on the door. "Please!"

Zoe stood up and asked, "What's going on?"

I shook my head then burst into tears. I let her take Scarlet out of my arms and guide me to a chair.

"What happened?" she whispered.

My hands were still shaking. "Scarlet," I gasped. "She nearly died, and Drake... saved her."

Zoe stayed with me as I cried out the fear and shock. But amongst the sickness growing in my stomach, there was one bright light. He cared. Drake really did care about our daughter.

Bekind the cat growled and nipped my hand as yet another knock on the door sounded.

"We're unavailable," I said, brushing the hair away from my sleeping child's face. She had gotten over everything in about ten seconds. Hours later, I was still shaking.

Zoe groaned and stretched her legs over mine. "I'm sick of the knocking, though."

Bekind shifted into her human form. "I'm answering it. You can't hide forever."

"At least put some clothes on," I teased. "And where have you been lately, anyhow?"

"Protecting you." She made a face. "Perhaps I've been spying in the wrong places." She headed to the door.

Zoe grinned. "Don't let her know, but she's one of my favourites. She's all about the family. I kind of think of her as your long-lost sister or something."

"Who just happens to shapeshift into a cat," I said wryly.

"That's the best bit."

"You're taking everything too well. That's the first sign of madness here: acceptance."

Before she could respond, Bekind returned with Brendan.

He grinned when he saw us sprawled on the bed. "Not an unwelcome sight."

"Stop being a perv," I said.

His smile only broadened. Bekind shifted back into her cat form and hissed at him.

"I'll behave," he said. "Cara, would you please come to dinner? The lineage consultant is back, Sorcha is back, and Drake is in a foul mood, even worse than usual. Anya keeps crying, and Arlen is in a fury of some kind. Would you please save me from the madness?"

"I'm not in a sociable mood, either, you know. My kid almost got crushed by horses."

He sat on the edge of the bed. "Is she all right?"

"She's fine," Zoe said. "I doubt she even noticed. She doesn't comprehend danger yet. Cara's the one who was in a state."

"Then I understand if you don't want to attend," Brendan said.

"She's going," Zoe said abruptly. She pointed at me. "Scarlet's asleep for the night. What are you going to do, keep staring at her for another eight hours? You're being ridiculous, and you need to calm down. Go eat and take a break from this room. I'll stay here with her. She'll be fine."

"No, I can't ask you to—"

"You're not. I'm telling you what to do. Now get out of here, bitch."

"Zoe!"

She looked at Brendan. "I'll send her down. Is she supposed to dress up or something?"

Brendan lifted his shoulders in a half-hearted shrug. "She tends to do whatever the hell she likes."

"Stupid question, eh?" Zoe glared at me. "Go get ready."

Frowning, I got up off the bed.

Zoe grinned. "Good girl. Oh, and see if Líle wants to drop by while you're at it."

I wasn't about to let her off that easily. "Oh, really? So you're trying to get rid of me to get Líle alone? Niiiice."

"Fuck off!" She threw a pillow at me. "I'm straight anyway!"

Brendan leaned toward her, his eyes twinkling. "Some say that love is straight as an arrow. But anything else is just the trappings. Gender, looks, titles, that's all on the surface. It's what's underneath that a person falls for—the soul. That's what love really is."

Zoe gazed at him as if in a trance. I cleared my throat, and both of them jumped. I raised my eyebrows at them.

"I'll leave you to it," Brendan said, straightening. "See you soon, Cara." He gave a little bow then left.

I watched him leave then turned to Zoe. "What the hell was that about?"

"I think he likes you." Zoe stretched. "And he's hot as fuck."

Bekind purred as if in agreement.

I scowled at both of them. "What are you, twelve?"

"No, I'm your friend, and you need a bloody break from all of the drama. Have fun. Go away."

I backed away from the bed dramatically slowly.

"I'm serious," Zoe said. "You told me you were lonely, so do something other than mope about for a change. Geez!"

I rolled my eyes. Bekind shifted back to human form and helped me find something to wear. She sat on the counter in the bathroom and watched me change.

"Maybe Zoe is right," she said. "Maybe it's time you thought about... other things."

I froze. "What are you on about?"

She blithely studied her fingernails. "There are a lot of rumours about you and Drake. People think you're a danger to him."

"I don't care what people think," I snapped.

"As you say." She waved her hand. "But you spent the last year in the human realm without even considering moving on from him. Perhaps Brendan will help you do that here."

"I'm not using Brendan." I used a hairbrush to pull my hair back into a ponytail. "We're not here to find me a boyfriend. We're here to survive."

"Maybe we can do both." She shifted and dodged the hairbrush I threw at her.

I stared at the goblet of golden wine in front of me and thought about taking a sip.

"Cara," Anya said, her eyes pink from crying. She took a seat next to me. "Please talk to me."

"Not now."

"The least you can do is hear her out," Arlen snapped from behind us.

I turned in my seat. "The least you can do is fuck off until I forget how you let my daughter wander into the path of galloping horses."

"Now isn't the time," Brendan said, coming to stand between Anya and me. "Tomorrow," he told her.

When Arlen and Anya moved to another table, Brendan took the seat next to me. "Having fun?"

"Obviously."

"Cara," he said earnestly, resting his hand on my knee.

"Ah, sire, there you are," Cathal, the lineage consultant, said as he approached the table. "I have a surprise for you."

"Do you?" Brendan asked wearily. "What now?"

"I've found you the right bride." Cathal beamed. "A new family, one who climbed the ladder after... your disappearance. A perfect match. Her entire line are prepared to back you after the marriage."

Brendan shook his head. "We're marching out tomorrow. I don't have time for—"

"But time is of the essence," Cathal insisted. "This is why we have to discuss—"

"Shut _up_ ," I spat. "He doesn't want to get married. Back off and let him enjoy his last night at home before we face Sadler's army."

" _We_ ," Cathal scoffed before turning on his heel and stalking off.

Brendan rubbed his temples. "I'll have to deal with this now, or he'll follow us to the Darkside. Excuse me, Cara."

Something in my chest tightened. "Deal with this as in let him marry you off?"

Brendan grinned, looking more like himself. "Not bloody likely."

My smile was a relieved one. I turned back to stare at the goblet again, but it was gone.

"Enjoying your meal?" Drake asked, sliding into the seat across from me.

"Can't you see the joy in my face?"

He shifted uncomfortably. Over his shoulder, I saw Sorcha glance in our direction from across the room.

"How is Scarlet?" he asked, fixing his gaze on me.

"She's fine. She's asleep for the night. Zoe and Bekind are with her. Oh, and Líle." I blew out a breath. "I'm not sure if I thanked you before, but—"

He held up his hand. "There's no need. I was there. It was the right thing to do."

"I was too far away." My voice quivered. "I would never have made it."

His knee touched mine under the table. " _I_ was there. You didn't have to make it."

"Thank you," I whispered. "If anything had happened to her..."

"You love her. I understand."

"She's amazing." I blinked back tears. "Every day, there's something new. I'm just glad she's back with me. I feel like I missed out on..." I let my voice trail away. He had missed out on everything, and it was starting to look as though he actually cared about that.

Cathal suddenly reappeared, smiling even though his eyes were as hard as ever. "Ah, there you both are." He patted me on the shoulder. "A worthy opponent, this one. Always one step ahead of me." He set a goblet of wine in front of me. "I propose a toast..."

I stopped listening when I noticed how straight Drake's back had gotten. I absentmindedly reached for the goblet, but Drake got there before me.

He held the cup in front of his face and gave the lineage consultant a humourless smile. "As Cara doesn't drink faery wine, I'll have her glass."

The lineage consultant mumbled, "I don't think... um... that's not a good..."

Drake lifted the cup to his lips. Cathal stopped talking, but beads of sweat appeared on his nose.

"Drake, don't," I said, a little too loudly.

Drake drank from the cup then slammed the empty goblet on the table. It didn't refill. Drake smiled, but it turned into a wince. His pale skin turned bright red. His forehead glistened, and then the redness darkened as though shadows were forming beneath the surface of his skin. His body tilted to the left.

"No!" Sorcha screamed. She raced across the room and caught Drake before he fell out of his chair.

"It was him!" I pointed at Cathal as he fled toward the door.

Arlen grabbed the old man's arm and yanked him back.

I spotted Brendan hurrying toward us. "Get the Miacha!" I called to him.

"What happened?" Sorcha asked through gritted teeth. Her eyes shone with unshed tears.

"He drank from my cup." My hands shook as froth bubbled out of Drake's mouth. "I think it must have been poisoned."

"He's dying," she said as if she couldn't quite believe it. "He's going to die."

"He's not," I said firmly. "Sorcha, look at me. The Miacha is going to help him."

But she wasn't paying attention. I recognised the fear in her eyes, the way her fingers trembled as she hugged Drake to her chest. I had been the same way about my daughter. I stood by helplessly, unsure of what to do.

Grey Eyes arrived with Brendan and immediately took over. She briskly tended to Drake, giving him something that helped him breathe. Sorcha stood nearby, and her tears were long gone. She turned in a semi-circle until her gaze fell upon Cathal. She stalked him, moving like a predator. Faeries hustled out of her way as she hunted her prey. I inched toward Brendan, terrified, and even Arlen backed away from Cathal.

"What's happening?" I whispered.

"She can't stop now," Brendan murmured. "Death has been invited, and he must take what he is due."

Sorcha's eyes were wide with grief. "You killed him," she said in a voice that wasn't her own. "He wasn't yours to kill."

Cathal cowered, pleading and begging. From nowhere, wind gusted through the room, drowning out his words. Sorcha's skin turned grey as she raised her arms and spread her fingers. From her fingertips, some kind of mist sprayed and surrounded Cathal.

"Please," he said. "I meant it for her. You know as well as I do that she's a curse on this realm. But he... he wasn't supposed to drink it. It was meant to be _her_."

Sorcha opened her mouth wide, deaf to his pleas. More mist was released. It seemed to be some kind of poisonous gas because as it surrounded the man, his skin turned grey like hers, and his eyeballs filled with red. He clutched his neck, choking as grey liquid burbled up out of his mouth. He suffered for a few agonising seconds before collapsing on the floor.

As soon as it was done, Sorcha turned back to Drake. The Miacha's medicine had helped, and he appeared to be recovering. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she held his hands. I suddenly understood a truth that cut me to the core. She was in love with him. The banshee actually loved her husband.

# Chapter 15

"It sounds as though it was a close call," Fiadh said as we watched our children play together.

Dymphna was spending as much time alone with her daughter, Eithne, as possible before we left. Zoe and Líle had gone out for a walk, and Grim was busy with Brendan, trying to figure out if anyone else had been involved in the poison incident.

Realtín darted around the children, giggling as she narrowly avoided Scarlet's clutching fingers. Setanta was smiling, a look of peace in his eyes that wasn't often present. Conn stood guard, as always, but he was accompanied by an extremely talkative Bran.

I absentmindedly fondled Bekind's furry ears. "I hear Drake will be well enough to leave tomorrow. The Miacha saved the day as usual. Besides, the poison wasn't meant for him."

"Are you certain?" Fiadh asked.

"It was my cup. The stupid old man thought I was the one getting in his way. I made an enemy of him; I doubt anyone else was part of it."

"Still, it must have been terrifying to be attacked so."

I forced myself to smile. "It was probably more scary to see him get punished by the banshee. Anyway, it's not the first attack that's happened since I've been here."

She set down her cup, looking ill. "Oh?"

"Don't worry. You're safe. It was outside the castle. Brendan and I went for a ride, and somebody shot arrows at us."

She glanced at Conn, fear creeping across her face. "Somebody from this court?"

I pursed my lips. "Everyone thought it was Darksiders."

"Darksiders?" Fiadh shook her head. "This close? I could see them harming a member of the Green Court, but never you."

"I was kind of harmed a lot in the Darkside, Fiadh."

"You provided an heir and ended Deorad's life. He was a monster, even in the Darkside. And Sadler's proven himself to be ten times worse, yet you took his eye. The Darksiders may have a complicated view on life, but we see you as _the_ queen. No. Look closer for your attackers. Only the Green or the Silver could have gotten so near. The surrounding countryside is covered in their armies. There's no way the Darksiders would risk such a thing."

"The Darkside army is not here," Conn said. "They are guarding Sadler. It's the only move that makes sense... until his reinforcements arrive. Smaller troops may be scattered, but that's for information."

"They've been attacking us for the last year," Bran added. "Closer and closer all of the time. Who else would it be?"

Conn shook his head. "Your information is wrong."

"Then who tried to take my daughter?" I asked.

"In the human realm?" Conn shrugged. "It's possible that Darksiders are responsible. But their thought process would have been a rescue."

"Rescue from who?" I demanded.

"The human mother who didn't know any better?" He inclined his head. "Or from the clutches of rival courts. Maybe even from Sadler. I don't know, and neither do you. That's the problem in this court. We only know what we are told."

I was beginning to think he was right. "I didn't come here to chat," I said, sighing at the look on Conn's face. "This journey could be dangerous. The destination definitely is. So I need you to make sure you have an escape plan."

"Conn does," Fiadh said softly. "We're prepared to run with all of the children. And your human friend. If the worst happens, we'll wait in the human realm. If you don't follow..."

"Yeah," I said. "Good. We all have plans."

Realtín's laugh drew my attention. Scarlet had fallen heavily on Setanta.

I rushed over to pick her up off of him. "Sorry, kid," I said, batting Realtín away from the children.

Setanta refused to take his eyes off my daughter. "She's my medicine."

I swallowed hard. Those were the first words I had ever heard him say. He reached out and brushed his hand against hers, leaving a shadow on her skin. She giggled and tried to snatch at him, but he pulled his arm away. When I sat back down, still holding Scarlet, Conn gave me a strange look.

"I think it's time for Scarlet's nap," I said as brightly as possible. "I'll see you tomorrow, Fiadh. I hope the journey won't be too tough on Setanta."

"He's a lot stronger than last time," she said with a smile.

I headed back inside, carrying Scarlet. Bekind followed in her cat form, Realtín was perched on my shoulder, and Bran trailed us like a puppy. When we got to my room, Anya was sitting on the floor outside my door. She looked miserable.

"I don't want to talk about it," I said, opening door.

"But, please, I have to—"

"Just come inside," I said wearily. "Come on, Bran, you, too. It's about time you had a break."

Bran took an armchair away from the fire, looking awkward. Anya sat on one sofa, and the rest of us gathered on the other, except for Scarlet, who toddled over to Anya for a snuggle.

Tears ran down Anya's cheeks. "I'm so sorry," she said, holding Scarlet tightly. "I didn't mean to let her wander off. Arlen distracted me, and I got caught up, and... I made a mistake. It won't happen again."

"I know it won't," I said. "Because if it does, I'm getting on Dubh and running you down."

"Cara, I would never do anything to hurt Scarlet. She's like... you know how I feel about her."

I knew. I would probably never forgive Anya, but I wanted as many allies as possible. Scarlet needed people who cared about her. Anya fell into that category, and it had been the first time she'd ever messed up with Scarlet. I should have forgiven her, but I couldn't find it in my heart. Life had hardened me, and being back in the faery realm had caused me to fall into my old ways with Drake and Brendan, but I could never forget what was at stake. Protecting my daughter was my true mission.

"Maybe you should go fetch Scarlet's meal," I said, removing my daughter from Anya's arms. "Taste it first, won't you?"

Her lower lip trembled. "I'll do anything you want. Anything at all." She got up and left.

"As annoying as the pixie is, that wasn't like you," Realtín chided, peering into my eyes as she hovered above me. Scarlet reached out and caught her, holding her to her chest like a toy.

"I can't be like me anymore," I said, ignoring the way the fur rose on Bekind's back. "It's not safe."

I fetched a bag of wooden blocks and sat on the floor with Scarlet. I could play games with her, but when it came to everyone else, I had to be tougher. I had seen Sorcha in action, and we were her enemy. Scarlet was in the banshee's way just by living.

Realtín teased Bekind until the cat started chasing her around the room. Shaking my head, I handed Scarlet a block. She held it in her chubby fingers then let go, but the block didn't fall. It hovered in the air. I snatched it and looked up sharply. Bran turned his head away, and I wondered if he had seen.

"No," I whispered to Scarlet, my heart racing. "This is how we play."

I placed the block on top of another and prayed nobody else had noticed the floating toy. Scarlet was changing in the faery realm, and the longer I kept it a secret, the less of a threat she would seem.

Zoe was staring at me as I dressed Scarlet.

"Just spit it out already," I snapped.

"Settle down, queenie. I heard that you made Anya be Scarlet's new food taster. What's that about?"

"It's about the only way I can stand her presence right now."

"I know she epically fucked up." She held up her hands when I grunted. "And I'm mad at her, too. But it was a mistake. An accident. She loves Scarlet. Everyone knows it. Why are you being so hard on her? You act as though she doesn't exist, at best. At worst, you sit there sending daggers her way."

I stared down at my daughter. She beamed back at me. "If I can blame Anya, then maybe I'll stop blaming myself."

"What on earth are you talking about?"

"Sometimes..." I cleared my throat. "Sometimes, I feel as though the things that happen are a punishment. When I was pregnant, I thought about ending the pregnancy, ending Scarlet, and now I'm being punished by almost losing her. I feel so guilty, and when she almost got hurt, it would have served me right."

Zoe moved around the bed to touch my arm. "Are you serious? You big eejit. This isn't your fault, and you've nothing to feel guilty for."

"You didn't want me to get an abortion, Zoe. I remember the way you looked at me back then."

"I wouldn't have liked it," she said softly. "But I would have still loved _you_. You didn't try to kill Scarlet. You thought about ending a pregnancy in the early stages because you had a good reason for it. Lots of people have kids and don't even care about them. How is that better? You love Scarlet. You light up when she's around."

"But I can't keep her safe! No matter how much I plan, a little mistake shows me that I can't protect her from everything."

She wrapped her arms around my waist and leaned her head on my shoulder. "Nobody can keep anyone safe from everything in the world, Cara. That's not possible. Sometimes, you just have to enjoy what you have and not consider the what-ifs. You're driving yourself mental."

"Yeah, well, I'm already a madwoman."

"Stop punishing Anya. You miss her. I know you do. And so does Scarlet." She gave me a meaningful look. "Try to forgive her."

"I won't forget it."

Her look turned pitying. "I know you won't."

"I'll try," I said after a moment.

Later, I carried Scarlet downstairs, with Bran on my heels. Brendan had requested we all join him for dinner, and I was nervous because I was afraid she would show signs of being different. We were the first in the dining room. Bran walked to a table and pulled out a chair for me. He had been unusually quiet all afternoon, and I was sick of worrying.

Instead of sitting, I glared at him. "Do you have something you want to say?" I made my tone as cold as I could manage.

He shook his head, glanced at Scarlet, and then looked away.

"Don't be foolish, Bran," I said. "The journey tomorrow is dangerous enough without you doing anything stupid."

He shook his head. "I haven't done a thing."

I lowered my voice. " _Please_ , Bran, please keep it that way."

Colour flooded his cheeks. "I'm not here to spy on you. My job is to keep you both safe. That's all."

Scarlet reached for him. She had no fear, and that terrified me. Bran took a step back as if he were afraid of her.

"Hold her for a minute, will you?" I dumped Scarlet into his arms without waiting for a response.

He held her awkwardly. Most of the fae weren't used to children, and Bran was no exception. "I... I don't know what to do with her."

"Just don't put a target on her back," I whispered, clutching his arm. "Don't do it."

His expression changed, something proud and defiant crossing his face. "I told you what my job entails. I'm not as naive as you assume."

I allowed a smile. "Good. Now give me back my baby before you pass out."

With a great deal of relief, he passed her back then indicated the chair. The tension in my chest eased a little as I sat down at the table.

Grim, Realtín, and Bekind came in, and I moved down a place so Grim could sit next to Brendan. When the brownie sat next to me, he smiled at Scarlet. She had already grabbed a napkin and stuffed it into her mouth.

"Her cheeks are red," he said. "Is she too warm?"

"I think she's cutting a tooth," I told him. "Plenty of dribbles and chewing going on."

"The journey may be difficult for her."

"At least she'll be safe... _safer_ with us."

"I hope so. If you were to leave her here, Realtín and I would watch over her."

I reached out to squeeze his hand. "I know you would. I just hate being apart from her. And I wouldn't want to put you at risk if any Darksiders decided to look for her here."

He shook his head. "I wish we were able to go with you."

"It's for the best." I sighed. "I know I'll need you, but—"

"You don't need anyone," he said firmly. "You thrived in the Dark Court without my help."

Before I could respond, Drake and Sorcha strolled in, arm in arm, surrounded by their bodyguards. I tried to swallow, but there was a knot of emotion in the way. They walked to the table and took the seats opposite me. Sorcha looked better than usual, as if the death of the lineage consultant had revived her somehow. Drake was pale, but he seemed to have recovered from the poison.

Grim had stood when they came in, but there was no way I was going to do that. I sensed Bran inch closer to me as if he were aware that the true enemy had just arrived.

Scarlet made an attempt to climb onto the table. Sorcha glared at her then abruptly reached across the table to grip Scarlet's face. Without thinking, I grabbed Sorcha's arm and squeezed. I felt her skin burn under my fingers.

"Relax," she said with a grimace of a smile. "I merely wanted to see the defect in her eye."

"You don't need to touch her to look." I pushed her hand away and pulled Scarlet close.

"It's a curious mark," she said lightly. "It reminds me of something, but I can't recall what. And that patch of colour in her hair... another defect?"

"It's good luck," I replied. "You said yourself how lucky she is."

"She'll need more than good luck," Drake commented blithely. "But she'll learn a lot in the Silver Court."

Sorcha narrowed her eyes. But more people entered the room, causing enough of a distraction to end the conversation. Bran's sigh of relief echoed mine. Bekind sharpened her claws on my calf in warning, making my eyes water. Anya came in alone, so I beckoned her over, despite how I was feeling toward her. She glanced at Arlen then trotted my way, but Zoe made it to the seat next to me first. I shrugged at Anya, who chose a seat on the other side of my human friend.

"You still feeling okay?" I asked.

Zoe nodded. "Yep. Mind still fully intact. The Miacha lady checked me over earlier. She's minding the other kids during dinner."

Dymphna and Fiadh arrived together and sat next to Sorcha. Conn stood behind Fiadh's chair. For a dinner amongst so-called friends, there were a lot of security guards.

Brendan was last to arrive. When he sat, it seemed as though fresh air had just been breathed into the room. His red-gold hair was damp, and a half-smile was etched on his face. It was weird, but I kind of associated the kings with seasons. Brendan was summer, all golden and warm and full of life. Drake's face, with his dour expression and the ice-cold manner he had taken on, spelled out a harsh winter. He and Sorcha looked like the king and queen of death.

Scarlet was laughing at the faces Grim was making for her, and I couldn't help but smile. She was spring, a new beginning, a fresh start. So that left me with... autumn, the time when everything began to die. The image of the mirror flashed across my mind's eye, and I clenched the arms of my chair.

A band I hadn't even noticed began to play music, and Scarlet's eyes lit up. When the first plate of food arrived, I tried to feed her, but she was too interested in the musicians.

"A child after my own heart," Brendan said. He stood and picked up Scarlet. "Eat your food before it goes cold," he told me then carried her to the area in front of the band.

I swallowed a lump in my throat as I watched him dance with her, spinning her around until her giggles grew louder and louder. Her own father was in the room and couldn't bear to look at her. That wasn't fair.

Sorcha grumbled something under her breath and rubbed her temples.

I stood. "Okay, don't get her overexcited, Brendan. It's her bedtime soon."

"Bedtime? We have no bedtime in this court," he teased, raising Scarlet high into the air and eliciting more of her childish laughter.

He returned to the table. I reached out for her, but he ignored me and set her on his knee instead.

Zoe pulled on my arm until I sat down again, then she leaned over and whispered, "That's too sweet."

Brendan held out a stick of raw carrot to Scarlet. "Now, this is a carrot."

As Scarlet reached out with her chubby fingers, Bran had a loud coughing fit right behind me. I stood to pour him a glass of water and accidentally-on-purpose knocked over the jug. The water spilled across the table and into Sorcha's lap. She leapt to her feet and complained loudly about clumsy humans. I peeked at Brendan to see him staring at Scarlet.

"It's her bedtime," I said, taking her before he could protest. "Sorry about the... water." I strode out of the room, followed by Bran.

Once we were in the hall and out of hearing range of the dinner party, I wrapped my arm around Bran's waist. "Thanks, Bran. Seriously, I would have—"

"Would have what?" Brendan asked from behind us.

I let go of Bran and took a step back.

Bran answered quickly, "Would have had to endure that entire awkward dinner."

I turned to look at Brendan. "Yep. Sorry. I know I'm supposed to be diplomatic and stuff, but that was awkward."

Brendan nodded, leaning against the door. "That's one word for it. Good night, Cara."

I couldn't read his expression, so I just said, "'Night," and strode away.

Bran clumped along behind me. At the stairs, I chanced a look back. Brendan was still standing there, watching us. I had no idea what he was thinking, and I wasn't entirely sure I even wanted to know.

"I'm in trouble," Bran whispered when we reached my room.

"You'll be fine," I said. "I'm the one in trouble. Do you think she did something to the carrot?"

He blinked a couple of times. "No, I mean I'm in trouble for the other thing. You know, the hug?"

I burst out laughing. "Let's hope that's our biggest concern, kiddo. Now you try to get someone to cover you so you can sleep, okay?"

He nodded, and I left him in the hallway. Scarlet was gnawing on her thumb, but she looked sleepy and contented. I rocked her to sleep, singing an old lullaby I remembered from my own childhood. I made up words to fill in the blanks, but my daughter didn't seem to care. She gazed at me as I sang, her small hand clutching my shirt for comfort.

Even after she fell asleep, I didn't stop rocking her because I didn't want to let her go. When I finally laid her down, I curled up next to her and stroked the silver patch of hair. _Defect, my arse._

Zoe returned, but I didn't feel like talking, so I pretended I was asleep. When I did finally sleep, I dreamed of a large golden mirror that told me things I didn't want to know.

# Chapter 16

Tears welled in my eyes at the sound of Realtín's keening.

"Don't go," she said between sobs. "Stay here where it's safe."

"You know I can't," I said, trying to hold off her damp kisses. "And you'll see me again."

"I won't. I won't! You won't come back. You'll disappear again."

I took a deep breath, snatched her out of the air, and held her close to me so I could gaze into her red beady eyes. "If I don't come back, you'll visit me. No matter what happens, you're a free sprite. You can go anywhere you like."

"You'll let us come to you?"

I nodded. "I promise you can visit me wherever I go."

"But what if you die?" she whispered, her body still shaking.

"Then you'll have to make sure Scarlet is okay. I mean it, Realtín. If I die, you have to swear you'll look out for her."

"Of course." Her lips trembled. "But you mustn't die. It would be a waste... after everything."

Brendan stepped into the hallway with Grim.

Realtín flew at her king's face and beat on his cheeks with her tiny fists. "If you let her die, I'll... I'll..."

Brendan gave the sprite an indulgent grin as he pried her away from him. He held her at a distance and looked at me as he said, "Nothing bad will happen to Cara. She'll be surrounded by soldiers... and _friends_."

"But what if—"

"Realtín." His tone was sterner. "The fae shoved Cara off a cliff, and instead of falling, she flew. Do you really think this was all for nothing? That the gods themselves would let her down now?"

Realtín stilled her wings and fists then shook her head.

"Exactly," Brendan said, and he even sounded confident. "She's destined for a long life. After all, she isn't done changing us yet."

He handed Realtín to me, patted me on the shoulder, and went on his way. I stared after him in surprise, unable to hide my smile.

"Careful," Grim said. "On some levels, people never change. You wouldn't be the first to fall to his charm."

I grinned. "Didn't you hear him? I don't fall; I fly."

"Cara..." he said warningly.

"I know. I know." I knelt beside Grim, laughing as Realtín tickled the back of my neck. "He wants a plaything, and I'm the safest one around."

Grim frowned. "I don't know that he sees you as a plaything anymore. That change might be far more dangerous. I'm worried that tensions between Brendan and Drake will..." He glanced at Realtín. "I'm afraid it will be awkward for you."

"I'm married to my daughter's great-grandfather. Life can't get much more awkward than this, Grim." I laid my palm against his cheek. "I'll protect myself."

He hugged me and whispered in my ear, "You'll die to protect her. The lore masters found something. I wanted you to know before you left. There was a time, long ago, when a god threatened to destroy the realm."

"But it didn't work," I said. "The realm is still here. That means we can do it twice."

"You don't understand. We haven't tracked down all of the manuscripts yet, but according to the lore masters, it was a long, hard battle. It required the Legendary Treasures and the interference of other gods to make the warring god sleep. You can't kill something that doesn't truly live. Sadler's god could be a newly awoken one. I fear I won't see you again."

"Find out the whole story before you start worrying, and I'll see you soon," I said firmly, pulling away. "Both of you. If I can stop a war, I will. I'll do whatever I can to help fix this mess. But I know I'll see you again. You're my family. Scarlet needs to know you."

As if on cue, Zoe turned the corner with my daughter in her arms. Scarlet squirmed to break free.

"Go ahead and let her down," I said. "She's going to be sitting down for a long time."

Zoe lowered Scarlet to the floor, and clutching my friend's hand to steady herself, Scarlet immediately toddled in Grim's direction. For a brief instant, a look of terror crossed his face, but Scarlet was relatively gentle for a toddler. She giggled as Realtín hovered before her, the sprite's arms crossed in mock firmness.

"Now you be good for your mammy," Realtín said right before Scarlet swatted her out of the air.

"She's always good for me." I removed Realtín from Scarlet's clutches, ignoring the sprite's indignant protests. "Take care. Don't let anyone push you two around."

After the goodbyes, I walked with Scarlet to the front door, where some of my travelling companions were waiting. Zoe, Líle, Bran, and Anya had gathered together and were watching something outside. I peered past them and saw a line of carriages surrounded by soldiers on horseback.

"The kids aren't going to go hungry, right?" I asked, feeling a little worried with the time to leave finally at hand. "It doesn't look like we have enough supplies for this many people."

"Don't worry," Drake said from behind me. "We have hunters with us. It won't be like before."

I remembered that time, when he had been planning on marrying the hated banshee on his arm even as he told me he loved me. I swallowed hard, trying to drive the memories away, but the more I saw him, the harder it was to hate him and the easier it became to hate myself.

"Are you coming with us?" Líle asked.

I turned to see who she was talking to. Sorcha stood there in a riding outfit. _Crap._

"Yes." Sorcha looked pleased with herself. "After the attack on my husband, I felt it would be remiss of me to stay behind."

"It was an attack on _me_ ," I murmured.

Sorcha gave me a sharp look. "What was that?"

"Who's taking care of the Silver Court?" I asked, avoiding her question.

"Your ancestor." Sorcha gave me a tight smile. "The only one experienced enough to handle an entire court."

I let out a harsh laugh. "Well, I hope you have a court to come back to."

Dymphna and Fiadh approached us with their children and Conn.

"How are we doing this?" I asked. "Do you need me to watch over Eithne for you, Dymphna?"

"I'm staying with her," Dymphna said.

Sorcha gave an exasperated sigh. "Is that really necessary?"

"Of course it is," Drake said. "It's important that the children remain protected. We'll stop frequently at safe points. Small groups of soldiers will constantly scout ahead to watch out for danger."

"You mean for Darksiders," I snapped.

His expression turned weary. "This entire journey doesn't need to be a battle. The group will reach Sadler in safety. That's all you need to know. Never let the children wander and have all food tasted before it's given to them, and they'll be just as safe as they were in the castle."

Brendan ran up the steps and draped an arm across my shoulders. "The logistics have already been worked out. It's time to travel." He drew me ahead of the others.

"You seem cheery," I said.

"I like to spread my wings." He glanced at me. "And I missed too much of the last journey our little team took together."

"Grim and Realtín won't be with us this time."

"It's for the best," he said, sounding serious for a change. "Grim makes smarter decisions than anyone else in my court, and he's shown himself to be an unbiased voice. He's the one I trust in my stead."

My smile was impossible to hide.

Brendan grinned back. "Are you sufficiently impressed yet?"

"I'll let you know when you get everyone back safely. Where's the Miacha?"

"She's already waiting," he said. "Don't expect her to sit inside a carriage the entire time; that's not in her nature."

"As long as you don't expect _me_ inside one the entire time, I don't care."

"I would have been disappointed if I saddled up Dubh so nicely for nothing."

"Really?"

"Of course," he said. "Trust me, carriage rides will get boring quickly. We have a safety saddle for Scarlet."

"Um, she's a baby. She can't sit on a horse."

"With you or me, she can. Besides, she's too young to be afraid. She'll be perfectly safe. We're unlikely to have to gallop anywhere dangerous, after all."

"Only the Darkside," I said smartly.

He lifted Scarlet out of my arms and held her over his head. She giggled ecstatically.

"See?" he said. "No fear. You would never let her fall. Neither would Dubh. Stop worrying."

"We'll see," I said. As if I could stop worrying. "But it's carriages first for us."

"And we'll see how long that lasts," he teased.

"Seriously, you're way too happy about this."

His face fell. "I've been trapped in that castle. This crown is a prison." He stepped away from me and winked. "At least this will feel a little like some freedom."

I watched him head over to his troops. He would never grow up.

Zoe and Bran caught up with me. Her eyes were bright with excitement.

"This is like something out of a history book," Zoe said.

I frowned at the huge carriages. Maybe Brendan was right about prisons. "We should ride on horseback at least some of the time. We'll need the exercise after sitting in that for a while."

"Whatever you say." She spun in a circle. "I'm going to make the most of the royal treatment."

I turned to Bran. "Where's Bekind? I haven't seen her yet."

"Neither have I," he said. "You should probably decide who you're riding with today before someone else does for you."

I glanced at Sorcha and shuddered. "Good plan." I eyed the soldiers. "There are a lot more soldiers than I expected."

"Kings trying to outdo each other, I expect." Bran blushed and cleared his throat. "Let's find you a carriage."

We settled on one of the larger conveyances. When Bran opened the door, Bekind was already curled up on a seat.

"How the hell do you always know what I'll do?" I asked her but only received a "meow" in reply.

"I'll be riding next to the carriage," Bran said. "So will Arlen. We're travelling in groups to ensure the horses can be rested fully. We're one of the last groups. When my horse needs rest, I'll ride with you, but most of the time, you'll see me outside your window. If you need anything, let me know. We're on a schedule, but as we're not leading, we can make stops as long as we don't fall too far behind."

"Whatever you say." I smiled. "Thanks, Bran."

"This is my job," he said proudly. "But I'm glad it is."

Sorcha and Drake shared a carriage with some of the so-called elite from the Silver Court. Far more people had joined the travelling party than I expected. Dympha, Eithne, Conn, Fiadh, and Setanta shared the largest carriage. I was joined by Zoe, Bekind, Anya, Líle, Grey Eyes, and of course, my daughter. A horn blew, signalling our group to leave.

"Think this will go smoothly?" I asked Líle.

"Let's hope." She glanced at Scarlet. "I think we must be in the safest carriage. I believe the Darksiders when they say they won't hurt her."

"I wish I could fully believe it," I whispered, looking out the window. Bran appeared to be on full alert, and Arlen was on the other side of the carriage, doing his very best to ignore us. "Anya, sort things out with Arlen. This is awkward enough."

"He doesn't want to talk to me," she said bitterly. "He barely looks at me."

"He loves you. He'll listen if you try hard enough," Zoe said.

Anya sighed. "Maybe I don't want to anymore."

"Ridiculous," I said. "You were happy with him. You haven't been happy since you left him."

"Scarlet makes me happy," she whispered. "That's enough for me."

I bit my tongue and kept my mouth shut. The carriage wheels groaned and rolled along in our part of the convoy.

"Shit," I said. "This is really happening."

"I'm kind of excited," Zoe said with a laugh. "I've heard so much about oblivion waters and all of that stuff. Maybe I'll get to see some of it for myself."

"No way," I said as Líle shook her head. "No oblivion waters. Never again."

Líle grinned, and a spark of colour lit up her eyes for an instant. I leaned back in my seat and hugged Scarlet, feeling as though maybe _some_ things were going to get better. I had been trying to avoid thinking about what would happen when we arrived. Facing Sadler wasn't exactly my favourite idea, but as I closed my eyes and inhaled my daughter's scent, I knew it was my only option.

Someone shouted my name outside, and I leaned out of the open window. Brendan sat on Dubh, who trotted alongside the carriage. The large faery horse whinnied as if in greeting.

I reached out as far as I could and managed to brush my fingertips against his neck. "Missed you, shithead."

"And what about me?" Brendan asked with a grin.

"I thought you were leading," I said.

"I need to keep an eye everywhere. After all, there's a king, two queens, and a miniature princess in these carriages. It wouldn't do to lose any of them along the way."

"Best not lose the miniature princess, or there'll be an angry wannabe queen after your blood."

"You're not a wannabe. You married a branded king, just as the other queen did. You're no different from each other."

"I think she'd beg to differ."

"Contrary queens generally do." He looked ahead, his eyes gleaming. "I'll leave you here, Cara. Dubh and I need to blow off some steam. I'll see you when we stop to eat."

He galloped away, leaving me feeling a little bereft. I sat back in my seat and caught Zoe's eye. She raised her eyebrows in question, but I ignored her.

Three hours later, I was already feeling as though I might be going a little mad.

"This is the longest trip ever," I complained. "If I was on Dubh, I'd be halfway to the Hollows already."

"We can't take shortcuts," Grey Eyes said. "Our path is longer than a sole rider could take."

"What about you?" I asked. "You know plenty of shortcuts."

She smiled and patted her bundle. "I won't be leaving just yet. On the way back, I'll return home for a time. I miss my sisters, and they'll want to hear all about our little princess. And the little lordling, of course."

"How do you think Setanta is doing?"

"Better now that Scarlet is here. She has a gift of her own."

I frowned. "Like?"

"He's stronger around her. The Darksiders will be very proud of their little princess."

Zoe burst out laughing. "I can't believe my best friend is a queen. This is just bizarre."

"Go home, Zo," I said, glaring at her. "Before you go all cray-cray on us."

"I'm not losing my mind," she said scornfully. "Maybe keeping that from happening to me here is Scarlet's second gift."

"She's just a baby." I squeezed Scarlet, but she struggled to get out of my arms. "She needs to grow up before people start using her."

"I was joking," Zoe said, sounding shocked.

"I know," I said. "But I wasn't."

By the time we made our first stop, I was starving, partly from boredom. Being carried around like royalty was as dull as dirt. I wished I could wander away and explore, but the soldiers had formed a strict perimeter. Some of the servants had made fires. Drake was busy giving commands, and Sorcha was following him around like a puppy.

"Ugh." I made a face as I watched. "Sickening."

"Jealousy is a bad colour on you," Zoe said. "Scarlet's still asleep. I say let her. At least she can eat while we're travelling and break up the journey a little. The carriages are comfy at least, right?"

I nodded, but I was thinking longingly of riding ahead on Dubh. _With Brendan_.

A shout sounded from the nearby forest, and a small group of soldiers arrived with Brendan in the lead. They dragged a deer behind them on a travois. Brendan dismounted and headed to the stream to clean up, leaving Dubh with a groom.

"Save me some food," I told Zoe before heading over to Dubh.

I sent the servants away to tend to him myself. I still thought of him as my horse.

"Really did miss you," I whispered as he nibbled on my hair.

"Need a hand?" Bran asked, coming up behind me.

"If you like," I said. "He's kind of an arse, though. He might bite."

"I'll take my chances." Bran expertly removed the saddle, and Dubh stood placidly and let him.

"You really are an arse, Dubh," I said, amused.

"He knows me," Bran admitted. "I've been the one taking him out for exercise most often. Nearly everyone else is terrified of him. How is the carriage?"

"Dull as fuck." I started rubbing Dubh down. "If it wasn't for Scarlet, I wouldn't set foot inside there."

"It's not so bad," he said. "There are thunderclouds ahead. You'll be glad of the protection soon enough."

"I know. I'm just bored."

"It's not the most exciting journey, but that just means it's a safe one."

"You're right," I said. "I shouldn't complain."

"No point pretending everything is fine." He glanced over his shoulder. "Looks like the food is being passed around. You'll be one of the first to eat."

"Let the people who've done all of the work eat first," I said sharply.

"Rebelling again?" Brendan asked.

I hadn't heard him approach, which kind of worried me. I really should be more alert, even with all the soldiers on guard. I turned to look at him. His eyes were almost feverish. He didn't belong in a stuffy court all day.

"No," I said. "I just don't see the point in us eating first when all we did all day was sit on our arses and be waited on hand and foot."

Brendan laughed. "You really are bored." He nodded at Bran. "Well, you heard the woman. Go spread the word. Those who work hard eat first."

Bran hesitated, probably wondering if Brendan was serious. But the king kept a straight face, so Bran hustled off.

"You're making fun," I accused.

"Never," Brendan said, stepping closer to me. "I just wanted to get you alone."

"Why?" I brushed Dubh a little too harshly. He stamped his feet in protest, not that I could ever hurt the monster.

"Remember the days when we rode together?" Brendan whispered, inching even closer. "I miss those days."

"That was a long time ago," I said, knowing full well that he was just high from the hunt. "That was a different version of me."

"Cara..."

Without responding, I strode away and got into the carriage, trying to control the spike of anger that kept bubbling to the surface. I didn't want the reminders or the weakness.

As I sat on the bench next to my sleeping daughter, Zoe appeared in the doorway. "Hey, I saw you stalking off from the tall, hunky king. Still pining for the one you can't have?"

I blinked, surprised by the harshness of her tone. "What?"

"I'm getting a bit sick of you." She got in and sat across from me, her expression stern.

I swallowed hard. Zoe might be a lot of things, most of them on the cheerful end of the spectrum, but when she had something to say, there was no avoiding her.

"Remember when we were about twelve or thirteen, and we'd have sleepovers in Fiona's house?" she asked.

I smiled. "Yeah, of course. We'd wreck the kitchen, baking terrible brownies that we'd force ourselves to eat just because we spent forever making them."

"Right, but it was Fiona's big brother we really went there for. He was, what, four years older than us? We'd talk about boys and spy on him with his girlfriend, and you swore he was the only boy you could ever like out of everyone we knew."

I shifted uncomfortably. "I had forgotten about that... crush."

"Yeah, _that crush_." Zoe shook her head. "So we were sixteen, and he was single, and he came on to you at Fiona's birthday party, and you acted as though he were the lamest creature on the planet. You told him you weren't interested and never would be."

"He was... too old for me. I just didn't care when I was an idiot twelve-year-old."

"And how old is Scarlet's father?" She shook a finger at me. "And remember how well you got along with Eoin back in the day? How did that end up, eh?"

"Zoe, what the hell is your point?"

"My point is that you like the unavailable. When anyone shows interest, you run a fucking mile. You literally have no clue how to handle anything remotely normal."

"That's not fair."

She arched one eyebrow. "Isn't it?"

The hairs on my arms rose. "I've never claimed to be perfect. I think I'm doing pretty well considering my upbringing."

"You can't use your family as an excuse forever. The standoffish, must-protect-myself-at-all-costs bit is getting tired. That's _always_ been your thing, you know? When someone's not that into you, they're okay. They're _safe_."

I made a sound of disgust. "Safe? Your biggest problem with me, according to you, is that I'm not safe enough."

"Before Scarlet, you were reckless with everything but your heart. You've never, since I've known you, actually gotten together with someone you liked who was going to stick around. It's like you're terrified to even risk it. And that would be okay if it wasn't making you absolutely miserable."

I leaned back, feeling as though I had been punched in the gut. "I haven't done anything wrong. Why are you acting like I've personally offended you?"

"Because I'm your best friend, and all I want is for you to be happy." She shook her head. "But you're your own worst enemy. You'll obsess over the married one, the one you got pregnant by when you thought he was going to die, the one who told you there was never a chance you could be together, but you run a mile from the one who actually shows an interest in you and Scarlet, the only one who can actually make you smile. You need to sort that out, Cara, before you end up alone."

My best friend climbed out of the carriage and left me with tears in my eyes. That she was right about me just made it all so much worse.

# Chapter 17

The rain lashed at the carriage roof, and Zoe was still in a bad humour. Fiadh had made some comment about my using my "charms" to get my way with Brendan, and Anya was being pathetic about Arlen. All of that contributed to my own wretched mood. Everything was getting on my nerves, mostly the fact that I was stuck in a carriage while everyone on horseback got to move fast. We would never reach Sadler at the rate we were going. And a part of me never wanted to get to our destination.

Zoe kicked the sole of my boot. "Stop being so mardy. You've nothing to moan about."

I gave her an exasperated look. "Have you really lost your mind? Do you not remember what we're doing here?"

She cracked her knuckles and pressed her lips into a thin line. It had been a long time since I had seen her so agitated. My knee rapidly bounced up and down; maybe I would be the one to lose it.

A shout sounded from nearby. I poked my head out the window, blinking away raindrops, and saw a couple of figures in the trees.

"Bran," I called out, "what's going on?"

"We're being watched," he said, his face tense. "Stay out of sight."

An hour later, the rain had grown heavier. But the tension around the trooping fae seemed to ease a little as time passed with nothing happening.

Out of the blue, Bekind hissed and arched her back. Something hit the door, and the carriage slowly rolled to a stop. We all stared at the door, then it opened to reveal a short male faery with a beak-like nose and over-sized ears protruding from a hood that appeared to be made from some kind of scaly skin. He didn't wear the colours of any court, and his eyes bulged when he spotted Zoe. He reached for her, and the sounds of swords being drawn echoed around us.

"Don't even think about it," I snapped. I raised my leg and kicked him hard enough to send him flying away from the carriage. "Líle, stay here," I ordered then leapt out after the man.

"Cara!" she shouted.

Ignoring her, I slammed the door behind me. The ugly little fae pounced on me, leaping up and grabbing my upper arms. I twisted out of his grip and punched him in the eye. Grimacing, he put his head down and barrelled into me, knocking us both into the mud. I wrestled with him, taking all of my aggression out on his body. Once I pinned him, I hit him again and again, furious at the thought of the way he had looked at Zoe. I hadn't spent the last year in the human realm feeling like a victim, and I wasn't about to let some faery turn my best friend into one.

Somebody lifted me out of the mud. I got one last kick in at the attacker.

The fae's face was covered in mud and blood. "She's a madwoman!" he spluttered.

I yanked my arms from Arlen's grip. "What the hell is going on? This little..." I landed another kick. "He tried to take Zoe!"

Brendan came around the side of the carriage. "Solitary fae grouping together to waylay travellers." He looked me up and down then laughed. "You're a little dirty, Cara."

"For the love of the gods, get that creature away from me," the little fae pleaded. "She's a demon."

Bran ran over to us, out of breath. "Sorry. I was surrounded. But these were no fighters. Only thieves."

"Are you all right?" Brendan sounded more amused than concerned.

"I'm fine," I said through gritted teeth.

But I was more than fine. I felt better than I had since I stepped inside the stupid carriage. I clenched my fingers, wincing with pain.

"You hurt yourself," Brendan scolded, taking my hand.

A flush of heat ran through me, and I moved away from him. I headed back to the carriage, desperate to get myself together. Zoe was watching from the window, frowning, but she didn't understand. I had come too far to be weak. I couldn't make that mistake again.

Zoe tutted as the tents were pegged down. "You know, I kind of expected them to use those beds you take apart and bring with you. At least then we'd be comfortable. Kind of."

I gave her a scornful glance. "Who does that?"

"Duh. Royalty." She turned and walked back toward our carriage.

I followed. "Okay. I get it. I push people away. But I didn't push you away. Not ever."

"And was that because I was safe enough, Cara? Was it because I was easy to leave and not so easy to care about?"

"How can you say that? You know I care about you. You've always been my best friend, whether I deserved it or not. I would do anything for you."

"You left me. More than once."

"Not by choice." I winced. "At least, not really. I love you, Zo. This trip is going to be tough enough without you giving me the cold shoulder."

Her blue eyes held a mixture of disgust and pity. "I would never give you the cold shoulder. _Never_."

"Then what is it?"

"You've changed." She moved closer and lowered her voice. "You're so cold. Look at you with Brendan, and even with Anya. You won't let yourself care. And then that fae who attacked us. You looked as though you wanted to kill him, as though you were enjoying hurting him. I thought you were scared, but you were _smiling_. And when you told me the plan, how they wanted you to lead them to Sadler so they could kill him, I knew you couldn't do it. Knew it without a doubt. But you're looking forward to it."

"Zoe, I—"

"It's written all over your face! You're pissed because it's taking so long to get there, to see him die. Are you freaking kidding me, Cara? This isn't normal. You're not going to walk away from that unchanged."

"I don't have a choice."

"We always have a choice. You're the only one who gets to choose what you do with this anger you have that's eating you alive. I know you're upset. I know you went through a lot. I know Sadler deserves to be punished. But you're letting your hate control you. You were never like this before. Look at how your dad behaved; you never allowed it to beat you down like this. You're letting Sadler win, Cara. You're letting him change you."

"You don't get it. It's not just about me anymore. I have to protect Scarlet at all costs. He'll always come after us. It's pretty here, but it's all for show. There's dirt under the beauty. We're living in a hovel with a fresh coat of paint. That's how this world goes. We're not home, Zoe. We're not. We're in a place where murder isn't murder if you have a good reason for it, or you know, if you're a king."

"Or a queen?" She raised an eyebrow. "This place is beautiful. It's the people who bring the ugliness. Are you really willing to be a part of that?"

"It's not like it would be the first time. I killed Deorad, remember? I know you didn't know him, didn't know this place, so it isn't real to you. In fact, probably nothing here is real to you. It's so pretty and fake that you think nothing can touch it, that nothing can taint it, but I see through it. I see everything clearly."

She shook her head. "Do you see _yourself_ clearly anymore?"

I remembered the mirror, my dark reflection, the person I was capable of being, the person I was _trying_ to be, and I nodded. I saw through myself best of all.

Snores from the other side of the tent woke me. Scarlet lay next to me on a fur with Bekind sleeping beside her. When I sat up, so did Bekind, her black ears pricked.

"Just need to pee," I whispered, grabbing my dagger from my under my pillow.

Bekind curled up again and closed her eyes. I got up and carefully stepped over sleeping bodies until I reached a gap in the tent. I peeked outside and saw some soldiers gathered around a fire. More of them stood farther away, passing around some kind of pipe. I spotted Bran joking with one of the silver soldiers by the carriages. We had made camp at a spacious stretch of grass near a crossroads, and most of the guards were on the lookout for passing travellers.

Staying in the shadows, I sneaked behind the tents then jogged toward the Great Forest. Security had been annoyingly tightened since the failed attack. I desperately needed a few minutes alone, without a bodyguard or an army or judgemental friends staring at me.

I reached the treeline and slipped between the tree trunks until a twig cracked behind me. Putting my hand on my dagger, I pressed my back against a tree and held my breath. Silence. I was about to move again when I heard the brush of wings against the leaves. Thinking it was Bran, I stepped out and brandished the dagger, furious at being followed.

Drake held up his hands and took a step back. "I just came to see if you were okay. That's all."

"And I just needed some peace. God, aren't you sick of being shadowed by bodyguards all of the time?"

He exhaled loudly. "Oh, yeah. The worst part is how good they are. I can hardly ever slip away."

"You're their king. You're kinda the boss of them."

Smiling, he leaned against a tree. "And their boss is still being threatened with a dagger."

"Oh, shit." I held the dagger behind my back, unwilling to let it go. "Sorry. How are you feeling after... you know?"

"I'm okay. The grey-eyed one said the poison wasn't in my system long enough to do too much damage. If you hadn't befriended the Miacha and sent Fiadh to the Green Court, I'd probably be dead."

"If I hadn't pissed off the lineage consultant, you wouldn't have been poisoned. I'm sorry."

"You never have to apologise to me." His tone softened. "You've never done anything wrong."

I pressed my lips together, thinking of all of the things I had done wrong. "Even killing Deorad?"

He bowed his head. "You said it yourself. You did what you had to do."

"Yeah, well." I shrugged. "I should get back before the search party gets sent out."

"Me, too." He stood still.

"Okay."

I made to move past him, but he cornered me against the tree, blocking my way. His wings beat faster, lancing the air with silver like living sparklers. He raised his hand, and thinking he was going to put it on my cheek, I closed my eyes and waited for his touch.

But as his fingers brushed against my skin, I popped my eyes open and slapped his hand away. "You can't keep doing this."

"What?" His expression was filled with anguish. "I'm supposed to be a king, and I can't do one single thing that I want. If I make the rules, then why is everything I want forbidden? Everyone else has all of the power, and I'm left with nothing. You look at me like..." He hung his head.

"She loves you."

He looked up and smiled. "Scarlet?"

My heart broke a little for him in that moment. "I... I meant Sorcha."

He flinched and backed away from me. "What are you talking about?"

"You married her, and now she cares about you. If I ever cross a line with you, she'll kill Scarlet just to punish me."

"She told you that?" He gripped my arms. "Did she tell you that?"

"She doesn't have to say the words." I pushed him away. "The most dangerous people in this realm live in the Silver Court."

"No. _Nothing_ will happen to Scarlet in my territory."

"I just don't think that's something you can promise."

"She'll always be safe with me," he insisted. "You and I can set a different path once I have more power. We'll take care of Sadler, and then we'll finally be free. The power will free us, Cara."

I stared at him, unsure of what I was seeing in his face. "You mean after you give your wife's god his sacrifices?" I asked in a shaky voice. "Is that the price of power?"

"You know the Darksiders deserve to die. If we don't deal with them, they'll always come after us. Haven't you seen it yet? If you and I work together, we can have more power than anyone in this realm. If I gain the majority, I'll be able to protect you... and Scarlet."

"I don't... I don't understand what you're saying."

His smile turned dark. "You will."

"What about Brendan?"

His gaze was earnest and steady. "Do you really trust him, Cara? He's as addicted to you as Sadler was. Don't mistake his humour for something more substantial. He made Scarlet his heir to use her, not to help you. Never forget that."

He spun and strode away. I then understood that the only way he could ever gain more power would be by betraying Brendan. And I was in the middle of their power struggle. Once again, I could be the deciding factor. And once again, I had to figure out who I could trust and who was just using me for Scarlet.

It had been raining for three days straight. Our carriage wheels had sunk into the mud, halting our progress. A group of soldiers tried to push us out of the mud while the rain rolled down their backs.

"This is ridiculous," I snapped. "We're never going to make it in time."

"We'll have to wait until the rain stops," Líle said. "It's pointless using up so much energy and getting nowhere."

"We could walk quicker than this," I said.

"In the mud?" Zoe shook her head. "When did you get so outdoorsy?"

"When I had to," I murmured, but she didn't hear me. I had been rattled since the conversation with Drake. He hadn't spoken a word to me since, but his words were constantly on my mind, except the whole incident felt like a dream. I wondered if I had misread him completely.

Later that day, Brendan approached the carriage, his hair plastered against his head and his hands and trousers covered in mud. "We're going to shelter in the forest," he said. "We'll set up a large camp and wait out this torrent. I don't know what's causing it."

"Aren't you supposed to have some control over the weather?" I asked.

He glanced up at the sky. Rain trickled down his cheeks and neck, but he didn't seem to notice. "Something's changed since..." He shook his head. "I don't know what's happening. We'll wait it out. We're expecting word from the scouts sent to look for signs of an overseas army approaching. Maybe we'll get lucky and be able to go home." He wiped his hair off his forehead, leaving a streak of mud in its stead. "I'll send food to the carriages while the camp is being set up. At least you'll all be fed, and hopefully, the rain will ease off."

He left us to move to the next carriage. Scarlet groused, so I played a game with her until the food arrived. When she finished eating, I rocked her to sleep.

"Aren't you going to eat?" Anya asked.

I shook my head. "I'm not hungry."

"It looks like a severe storm is brewing," Líle said.

"Sadler makes storms," I said. "Think he could be nearby?"

"I doubt it," Líle said. "Didn't you tell us that he never leaves the castle?"

"I suppose."

The constant rain was depressing. The sky was permanently dark, and everything seemed dull, as if a dark shadow hung over all the colour.

Bran leaned through the window opening, dripping water along carriage wall. "It's time to go to the camp. We want to leave before the weather takes a turn for the worse. We think it's going to flood, so we're going to have to hurry."

We all grabbed our bundles and stepped outside. My shoes sank into the mud, which felt like a mouth wanting to suck me into the earth.

"Hold on to each other," Bran ordered.

Thunder rolled in the distance. The sky darkened. I held Scarlet against my chest, suddenly petrified. Even nature was turning against us. Lightning flashed in the sky to the east.

"Help Zoe," I shouted at Líle. "She's not used to this."

I was so glad that Grim and Realtín hadn't come with us. I could just imagine the sprite freaking out.

I slipped and went down to my knees. When I tried to stand, it felt as though something was grabbing my leg. I held Scarlet over my head and shouted for Bran to come and take her. Brendan appeared from nowhere and lifted me out of the mud with ease. My trousers were ripped, and blood dripped down my leg.

"What the fuck was that?" I cried.

Brendan only shook his head and carried me toward the camp. Grey Eyes tripped once and almost went down, despite her agility. The mud seemed to rise up to grasp at her. Bran lifted her onto his shoulders, bent his head against the rain, and continued the trek.

We finally moved out of the mud, but none of us had made it through unscathed. Everyone had scratches wherever they had been touched by mud. Brendan set me on my feet under a tree, but my knee buckled.

I hissed from the pain. "Fuckers."

"Come on." Brendan ducked his head under a tree branch. "We need to get everyone's wounds cleaned. One of my men caught a fever when he left a scratch alone this morning. I'm not taking any chances."

"What the hell is going on?"

"Not now." His face was tight, his jaw clenched, and his eyes furious. I decided to swallow my questions until later.

We walked for nearly an hour before reaching our new camp. The tents had been used as canopies that stretched across the treetops, sheltering a wide area from the weather. The horses were led in and kept in their own section. The rest of us pretty much had to live together.

Anya fell asleep with Scarlet that evening. I caught Arlen watching her from across the small fire.

"Oh, just talk to her," I said, walking past him. "You're both being idiots."

I poured a cup of boiled water from the pot and took it back to Zoe. "You need to clean your scratches, so you don't catch a fever or something."

Her eyes widened. "That was so scary. It felt like something was trying to pull us down."

"Or stop us from going any farther," I said. "We'll be okay. We're not alone here. It's just a bit of bad weather. Everything here is full of extremes. You know that."

When she calmed, I moved on to Fiadh and Dymphna. Eithne was asleep in Dymphna's arms, her hair gleaming under the light from the fire. Setanta lay still, but his eyes were wide open.

"He okay?" I asked Fiadh as I took a seat next to her.

"Not really." Her skin was pale, the stress lines clearly showing in her face. "He wasn't... as lively in our carriage."

_He wasn't as lively without Scarlet._ I pushed away the thought. "It's a tough journey," I said, trying to put on a reassuring face. "I bet he's a little sickened from the motion. Grey Eyes might have something to help with that."

She nodded. "It doesn't look like we're journeying anytime soon. This seems almost like a hideout."

"It's a little strange, but we'll move on as soon as the rain stops making the travelling so hard."

"Something's slowing us down for a reason," Conn said, surprising me. I kept forgetting he was around because he was so quiet.

"Nothing's going to stop us completely," I said.

We were interrupted by shouting. A young female faery raced, went straight to Drake, and whispered something to him. He immediately stood and beckoned Brendan. The pair of them jogged out of the camp and into the forest. I got up to follow, but Bran stopped me with a hand on my arm.

"You don't want to see," he said. "It must be bad, so you shouldn't see."

"I have to know. Watch Scarlet for me. Please, Bran."

To my surprise, he let go. I trotted in the direction the two kings had gone. About a hundred feet from camp, I heard panicked voices. I turned that way and found Brendan and Drake with a group of scouts. Two of the scouts were holding up a badly beaten man wearing a silver band around his forearm.

"What's going on?" I asked.

I could tell by Drake's expression that he wanted me to leave, but Brendan waved me over. I moved to stand by his side.

"That's what we're trying to find out," he said. "This is one of the scouts we sent to look for ships."

"Did you see anything?" I asked. "What happened to you? Where are the rest of you?"

The faery licked his bloody, cracked lips then spat blood. "The rest are gone. Taken by Darksiders. They sent me back to pass on a message."

"What message?" I whispered.

Brendan reached for my hand. I thought it was to comfort me, but when I caught a glimpse of his face, I knew he was the one who needed comfort.

"They said... we need to give back their stolen princess unharmed and that they want their queen back, dead or alive. If we do that, Sadler will merely conquer."

"And if we don't?" Drake asked.

"Then... then no one outside the Darkside will survive. They'll take the land and leave nothing alive in their wake. They don't want to war with us. They want to obliterate us. We have a week to give them what they want, or war will be declared." The faery tilted his head toward me. "He said my team will receive a quick death if I bring _her_ back. If I don't, they'll be slowly tortured."

"Who said that?" Brendan demanded. "Sadler?"

"The Fox," the faery croaked out. "The Fox told me this."

"Reynard?" I shook my head. "This doesn't make sense."

"The Fox has a message just for you," the faery told me, though he sounded reluctant. "He told me to let you know that you're his reward for returning the princess. He told me that if you survive him, Sadler will let his soldiers have you and use you to breed the next generation."

I shivered, but I stood tall. "Reynard _wishes_. There's no way Sadler said that."

"How can you be so sure?" Drake asked. "He's a madman!"

"Because he knows his soldiers wouldn't do it. Maybe there are a few like Reynard, but they aren't all like him. They want the princess back. They're not going to stand by and watch Reynard get his hands on the queen." I thought of Rumble and all of the others who had been kind to me and hoped I was right. "I just don't believe that Sadler's this stupid."

"He's done worse," Brendan said. "We need to keep the troops focused on Cara and Scarlet at all times. This is a warning. They're going to come for her."

"Nobody followed me," the injured scout said. "They don't seem too interested in straying far away from home."

A thought came to me. "Wait. Where were you when all of this happened?"

"Near the River Garbh," he said. "We needed to reach a decent viewpoint. There are plenty of places to look when you know what you're looking for."

"So you did it," I said. "You made it to where you needed to go. You looked for ships?"

"We did," he said. "We watched for an entire day before we were ambushed. After that, they dragged us away. So in the end, I only caught a glimpse."

"A glimpse of what?" Drake asked. "What did you see?"

The faery scout gave me a begrudging nod. "It looked like she was right. I heard the horns in the distance and saw some flags in the fog. The weather is strangling the realm, but I saw enough to know the truth."

"Which is?" Brendan asked, his fingers tightening on mine.

"There's another army coming in on ships. And their numbers will far exceed ours. We'll never beat them. There's no way we can win this war."

# Chapter 18

Under the tent, Anya was shivering uncontrollably. I passed her a cup of tea and gave Arlen the stink-eye. He moved closer and held out his hand to her. She took it willingly, relief crossing her face, but he didn't relax. I knew the peace treaty between them wouldn't last long, but it would do for the moment.

Satisfied, I eased into a place next to Zoe and made sure she received a plate of food. I had noticed many of the fae had begun ignoring her. The children were asleep, and most of us had gathered to eat and discuss the warships that were on the way.

"He only caught a glimpse," Sorcha was saying. "He might have panicked. They could have tricked him. He was badly beaten. Who knows what he really saw?"

"Can we really afford to assume otherwise?" I asked.

"There's nothing we can do either way," she responded, colour rising in her cheeks.

She wasn't angry; she was scared. I could almost taste the fear in the air. Everyone was scared. Everyone but me. For some reason, having the story confirmed brought a strange sense of relief. At least we would have to make plans.

"What about the scouts?" I asked. "Reynard will kill them."

"Reynard will find us along the way," Brendan said. "Of that, I have no doubt. If the scouts are still alive, we'll rescue them. But I'm more concerned about the number of ships."

"If things get bad, we could always think about evacuating people to the human realm," I said in a low voice.

Indignant gasps rose from the group.

"Even with this kind of threat approaching, I don't think that many fae will agree to that," Brendan said. "Particularly the ones who have never left this place. This is their home. _Our_ home. We can't just walk away and let Sadler take it."

"He's going to destroy everything if we don't stop him," Drake said. "We have to act."

"We _are_ acting," Líle said. "That's why this trip is happening, is it not? This was Cara's plan, and we're lucky the troops left when they did or we would have missed a chance."

"A chance to do what?" Sorcha threw up her hands in exasperation. "We can't beat death. Not like this."

"What about your god?" I asked. "The dead are like gifts to him, right? So he must be mightily pissed that some other arsehole god has taken back his dead."

"I'm not his spokesperson," Sorcha snapped. "I was born this way. It's not like he chose me. If we're lucky, he'll help us. If not, we can always make a sacrifice."

I bristled. "Oh, and is it royal blood you need this time?"

She smirked. "Now that you mention it..."

Drake pounded his fist into his other palm. "Enough. This is getting us nowhere."

"We need to move on," Arlen said. "We can't stay here for much longer."

The rain was still beating down, along with some hail, which caused tears in the fabric over our heads. The trees provided enough cover to keep our fires going, but Arlen was right. We had to keep moving.

Brendan rubbed his temples. "We'll wait another day or two and see how things stand. We can always send riders ahead and—"

"No," Drake said. "It's too risky to split up now. Not with the children here. Whatever's causing this storm can't keep going indefinitely. Something has to give. We can wait it out, but at some stage, we'll need to fight back."

Brendan looked at him with interest. "Think that's something you can manage?"

" _We_ can," Drake said firmly. "We're stronger together. Yes, we'll leave a pretty big mark behind, but maybe a sign that we're working together will do the job."

"Wait," I said. "Are you two talking about changing the weather?"

Brendan smiled grimly. "Something like that."

The discussion went on for another hour, but I kept my eyes on Brendan. He wasn't himself. He seemed beaten somehow, as if the entire realm weighed on his shoulders. Finally, the group broke up and went to find sleep.

During the night, I woke up thinking I heard somebody call my name. The lilac moon was full, casting a pretty glow on the area outside the makeshift canopy. The horses whinnied softly on occasion. I stared up at the fabric. I was suffocating in camp, strangled by everyone's fears and opinions. I wanted to run, but there was no way to outrun my own worries.

I slipped out of the camp and walked through the trees, remembering my past journeys. I let my hands brush the low-hanging branches and felt the bark on the thick, ancient trees. I was at peace in the Great Forest, but a part of me was eager to see the Darkside again. I feared that was because I had turned into a cold-hearted murderous bitch who was desperate to kill Sadler, so I didn't really want to think about it too much.

After a while, I caught the scent of something familiar and stopped short. Ahead of me, at the foot of a tree, grew a small white flower. Brighid's flower. I rushed over to the plant. As I knelt beside it, I noticed another at the next tree. Then a third and a fourth. On and on they went, one after the other, forming a trail with no end in sight. I heard movement and knew I wasn't the only one in the forest. I should have turned back, should have worried about danger, but my feet kept moving, against my will, following those stupid flowers.

I entered a small clearing and found Brendan sitting on a fallen tree, his head bowed as he clutched a handful of Brighid's flowers.

"Brendan?" I whispered.

His head jerked up expectantly, then his face fell when he realised it was me. His eyes were glassy and his face red.

"I'm... I'm sorry if I disturbed you," I said. "I was just... following the flowers."

He sighed and squeezed the bunch in his hands. "Yeah. Me, too."

"I should probably..." I wanted to leave, but I couldn't. He looked so upset that I was almost afraid to leave him alone. "Are you okay?"

He nodded, and I sat next to him. He didn't send me away, but he didn't look at me either.

"You're upset," I said after a minute. "What's wrong?"

"Everything." He tried to smile. "Didn't you hear? Sadler's raised the dead to destroy everything here. All because of me."

"You can't take responsibility for everything he does."

"I don't. I just... this is my punishment. I'll never be forgiven, no matter what I do."

"What are you talking about?"

"This!" He shoved the flowers at me. "These. _Her._ She's never going to let me away with the things I did."

"Brendan, you're not making any sense. Brighid isn't punishing you."

He shook his head, pain clear in his eyes. "Everything that's happened since I've returned has turned out bad. Look at what happened to you. I did this. I caused all of this. _You're_ my punishment, Cara."

"I'm not... we're okay. Right now, I mean. Shit has happened—there's no question about that—but we've all survived."

"I make promises I can't keep. I know how impossible it is to save everyone, and yet I keep saying I will, as if she'll hear and help me keep the promises."

I put my hand on his shoulder. "It's going to be okay. Nobody expects you to perform miracles. You just have to do the best you can."

"It's never good enough. Haven't you noticed? You coming here, us being friends, Drake, the baby, all of it. It's all part of my punishment. I wasn't freed from the Fade. I just found my punishment, my own personal hell. It's meant to happen this way, and I'm terrified because I don't know how it's supposed to end."

"Shut up," I said.

"Excuse me?"

"I told you to shut up. We're not puppets on somebody's string. We make choices that belong to us. There's no fate, no destiny, nobody writing in a little book all the things that are supposed to happen forever. We chose this life. All of us, in one way or another, chose this."

"You told me we forced you into it."

"Yeah, well, I was wrong. This feels like home to me in some way I can't even explain. The thought of going back to the human realm after this is killing me, but—"

He turned to stare at me. "Wait. You're going back? After everything? You're just going to go back?"

"That's where we belong—me, Scarlet, and Zoe. We can't stay here and risk the madness. We don't belong here."

He reached out and cupped my cheeks. "You're perfect for this place," he whispered. "You already know that, so why keep running away?"

I smiled. "Because I've never known what was good for me. I'm not planning to go back, Brendan. I'm just not planning on staying _here_. All I know is that I want Scarlet to be raised in the human realm, where she belongs, if anything happens to me."

"You're so unbelievably selfish," he whispered, letting go of me.

"What?"

"Scarlet is fae. She's one of us. Denying her the opportunity to know her heritage, to learn her culture, to understand where she comes from is just..." He shook his head. "Have you learned nothing from your own experiences? You hated the not-knowing, hated that empty space that couldn't be filled because you didn't understand where you came from truly. It'll be worse for her. She's come alive here. You know it. Even when she was in the womb, she prospered once you brought her back home. And you're just going to take that away from her? Fiadh tells me Setanta is a different child around Scarlet, and even Líle has come to life again, so why would you ever consider taking her away from all of this, from _us_?"

"She's a baby, and she's mine. I'm sick of faeries trying to take her away from me. Between Sadler and Anya and Drake dropping his hints about her growing up in his court, I'm sick of it all. I'm terrified for her." I jumped to my feet and started pacing. "I didn't plan on becoming a mother, but now that I am, I have to do it right, no matter what that takes from me. Can't you see how much they all will want from her? What she can do?"

He stood and stepped in my path. "What can she do?" he asked in a low voice. "What are you so afraid of?"

As I gazed into his eyes, I knew he had seen something in Scarlet. "I'm afraid they'll use her up, that she'll never be her own person. I'm scared that someday, down the line, she'll end up like you and do what's expected of her instead of making herself happy. You're a good man, Brendan, but they'll use you up, too."

He ran his hands through my hair, brushing my fringe away from my face, then leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. A surge of desire ran through me, blinding and blood-burning. It was terrifying. It was weakness. I wanted him so badly it hurt, and I couldn't allow anyone to have that kind of power over me a second time.

My brain had an insta-argument with itself, then I pushed him away. "I'm not the same anymore."

He gave me a sad look. "I'd say you're almost exactly the same, Cara."

And when he left me standing there, I felt cold and empty and alone. But at least I wasn't weak.

We gathered in a circle around the kings. Sorcha stood apart from everyone else, watching anxiously as the two men faced each other. I held on to Scarlet as she reached out for Zoe's long hair. Zoe smiled. I was pretty sure she had been avoiding me as much as possible, but I wasn't sure how to mend our relationship.

"Are you ready?" Brendan asked.

Drake shrugged. "If you are."

Brendan laid his hand on Drake's right shoulder. Drake mimicked the action.

"Can you feel that power?" Brendan asked. "The one in the air, weighing down on us? That's what we're going to push back against."

Drake looked at Dymphna. "Is everyone ready to leave?"

"Everything's packed," she said. "We just need the road to harden enough to make it safe for travel."

Drake nodded. "Okay. Let's try."

Brendan took in all of us in one sweeping glance. "Good. The key is to not crumble under the power. Don't let it get the better of you. Never falter. We're fighting back, but we do it as one. Trying to push ahead will just hurt you."

"Is this safe?" I asked. "Should everyone be here?"

"I don't know what will happen," Brendan said. "I've never experienced anything quite like this."

"It's just Sadler," Sorcha scoffed. "Both of you can beat anything he can do."

"Your courts are bigger," Fiadh said, "but he may have the help of a god."

"We have the help of my god," Sorcha replied with a dark smile. "Death is the most powerful of all."

Bekind stepped through the crowd in her human form. I hadn't seen her as anything but a cat in what seemed like ages. "I think Cara and Scarlet should step back," she said. "This kind of magic could never be called safe."

"You're a worrier," Brendan said with a teasing grin.

"Still." She tugged on my arm and led me back to our shelter.

"What are you worried about?" I asked once we were away from the others.

"Everything." She looked at me. "They might think it's worth the risk, but I'd rather keep you safe."

"Do you know something we don't?"

She shook her head. "I just have a bad feeling. Trust the cat, Cara. Always trust cats."

I rolled my eyes and rose up on tiptoes to see what was happening. Brendan and Drake hadn't moved, but the rest were stepping away from them.

"They're calling forth heat to dry up the road," Bekind explained.

"Do you think it will work?"

"I hope so. But I imagine we'll be fleeing to the human realm soon enough."

"Just make sure Scarlet's with you."

Her hand slipped into mine. "You'll know because you'll be with us."

The crowd around the kings appeared to jump back. A number of people fell, and I suddenly had a better view. A bubble of heat had surrounded the two men. Drake's cheeks burned red, and Brendan seemed to be holding him up.

"This isn't going well," Bekind said. "Drake isn't used to this. He's struggling. If he gives up, Brendan won't be able to deal with this by himself."

"He won't give up," I stated.

A ball of energy seemed to rise from the two kings, and a miniature gale-force wind spun around them, sending the surrounding fae even farther back. Somebody shrieked, and a number of fae rushed to carry away a prone body.

Light cracked open the sky. Rain poured, only to never reach the ground. The drops rose upward in steam.

"This is freaky," I whispered.

"Be ready," Bekind said.

I glanced at her then flinched when her face lit up with red light. I turned to see a flame shoot straight at us. There was no time to run. I ducked and held my daughter close to my chest, expecting us to die together.

But nothing hit us. After a moment, I opened my eyes.

"The tent's on fire," Bekind cried.

I looked at where she was pointing and saw that the fabric directly to our left was burning. "I thought—"

"Move!" She dragged me toward the horses. "Leave, Cara."

"They need our help," I said. "You go. And take Scarlet."

Somebody roared, causing me to look back. The kings were on their knees, and people were running around in every direction. But the sun had come out, and the rain, lightning, and wind had stopped. The fae calmed and began tending to injuries and putting out the fires.

"That was weird," I said. "I've no idea what happened."

Bekind stared at me. "You don't?"

"No. I mean, I saw what you saw. There was fire shooting everywhere. I thought one was heading right for us."

"You didn't see?"

I frowned. "No. I was trying to protect Scarlet."

"You don't know," Bekind said, shaking her head. "You really have no idea."

My stomach dropped. "What are you talking about?"

"Cara, the fire came for us. You were about to die. I would have suffered, but I can't die. You and Scarlet were done for. But at the last second, the fire just turned and moved in a different direction."

"That's not possible. You don't know what you're talking about."

"Cara," she said in a stern voice, "was it Scarlet? Did she move the fire?"

"How could she? And why _would_ she? You know her. She has no fear."

"Maybe she has no fear because she can make things happen," Bekind said. She looked at Scarlet, a sense of wonder on her face. "She's more than we thought, Cara. She has power from both kings. They shared a body, and that body had power. She has power, too." She spun in a circle, her eyes bright. "I'm so stupid. Of course, she has power. This is how they found us in the human realm. She left traces of magic behind. How did I not see it before?"

"You don't understand," I said, my eyes brimming with tears. "She didn't do anything. There's some kind of magic around her, something protecting her. You remember what the Miacha said, right? When she was born, they told us then that she was protected. Sorcha said Scarlet was dying in the Dark Court, but she didn't die. She's just... protected by magic."

"That's not normal magic," Bekind scoffed. "Do you think the likes of Drake or Brendan can do this?"

"Stop putting this on my baby." I bit the inside of my cheek so hard I tasted blood. "She _didn't_ do this."

"Then it's more important than we thought," Bekind said. "The only one who could save her from death was a deity. This is huge, Cara. Scarlet is meant for great things."

"What are you on about now?"

"Even the gods think so," she said as if in a trance. "There were always stories, prophesies of what was to come, but this is more than I expected. Scarlet has been chosen by the gods themselves. She's important."

"She's a baby!"

"A child of the gods," Bekind whispered, and I wanted to throw up.

# Chapter 19

Once the fires had been put out, the success of the two kings working together was all anyone talked about. To my relief, Bekind had been the only one to see anything strange happen with us. By the time everything was packed away, the road had hardened in the sun enough for us to move on safely.

I switched carriages so that Scarlet could spend time with the other children. I had so many questions about my daughter, but I knew nothing for certain. I hoped that Setanta could shed some light on the subject.

"I hope you don't mind," I said to Fiadh as Bran helped me into the carriage. Though there were fewer seats, it was the most spacious carriage. The carriage moved slower than the others, so the journey wasn't as rough. Brendan had made sure of that, and I felt it was unusually thoughtful of him.

"Of course not," Fiadh said. "The children play well together."

"I'm going to ride today," Conn said. "Lean out and call if you need me." He leaned down to run a hand through Setanta's hair then left.

"He loves that kid," I said.

Fiadh covered a sharp gasp.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Fiadh laughed, but she looked about to cry. "Nothing, nothing." She pointed at an area that she had set up as a sort of playpen. "You can put Scarlet in there. And don't worry. It's safe. They're well buffered."

"I know," I said, though I still felt a little uneasy. I settled Scarlet in next to Eithne, who immediately hugged my daughter. "She's super sweet, Dymphna."

"She must get that from her father," Dymphna said drily.

I grinned at her and sat down. The girls immediately started to play. Eithne was a couple of years older than Scarlet, but she still had a baby face. Setanta watched them with interest, and after a few moments, he made an effort to pull himself up into a sitting position. Fiadh moved to help him, but he scowled at her until she backed off.

"Independent little man," I said. "I hope the baby doesn't bother him."

"Oh, no," Fiadh said. "He's happier when the girls are around."

"It's weird," I said. "The time thing, I mean. Scarlet could end up looking the oldest if she goes back to the human realm."

"Young children grow much the same here as they do in the human realm. It's when they become teenagers that the changes begin to slow down. In any case, age isn't important here," Fiadh said. "Neither is time. Those ships may never arrive."

"If we're lucky," I murmured.

Dymphna relaxed in her seat. "When I was growing up, this could never have happened—children of rival courts playing together."

"And a human besides," I teased. "Kids don't care about that stuff. Not until somebody teaches them to."

"Perhaps you're right." Dymphna sighed. "And some of us learn to forget what we're taught. A daoine sídhe loving a human was once unheard of."

Fiadh glanced out the window with a look of longing in her eyes. "Having three kings is certainly unusual, too."

I shrugged. "I bet human queens and princesses aren't so common here, either."

"More than you would expect," Fiadh said.

Dymphna nodded. "Although few last. Humans lose themselves so easily in the courts."

I thought about that. "When we came from the Fade, Brendan and Drake took me to this village. A girl there told me that humans aren't for the summer, that it's only in the courts that they lose their minds. Maybe if I just avoid the wine and dancing, I'll be okay."

Fiadh smiled. "If you haven't succumbed already, then you're likely safe."

"Maybe I lost my mind ages ago, and it's just that nobody noticed."

Dymphna snorted. "I doubt you could have escaped from Sadler if you had lost your sanity."

"Ronnie did." I frowned. "Although who knows where she ended up."

Conn stuck his head through the open window, startling us. "There are Darksiders approaching, my lady. Two, at least. What would you have me do?"

It took me a second to realise he was addressing me. I glanced at Dymphna. "Can you watch her?"

"Of course."

I got up and went to the door. Conn unlocked it and moved aside to let me out. The carriage was moving slowly enough for me to jump without hurting myself, so I leapt to the ground. Conn immediately mounted up again.

Bran rode up on his horse. "What are you doing?"

"Get Líle," I said. "Now. Then guard Scarlet as if your life depends on it."

"But—"

"I mean it, Bran," I snapped. "Now. Move!"

He obeyed without another word.

"They're coming from behind," Conn said.

"I need to speak to them before Drake sets his troops on them."

"Then share my horse."

"I can go alone. You need to watch over Fiadh and Setanta."

"This is what Fiadh would want," he said gruffly. "Those Darksiders will die before they reach us if you don't get to them first."

"Then we had better hurry." I moved closer, and he leaned over to help me up in front of him.

"Gallop," I commanded. "Before anyone realises what we're doing."

"Done." He dug his heels in, and the horse took off. "It'll be harder to follow us this way," Conn said, guiding the horse into the forest and away from the road.

Minutes later, I heard shouts behind us and the sounds of soldiers in pursuit. My blood burned, and I hated to admit it even to myself, but I felt more alive than I had in ages.

"How did you know the Darksiders were coming?" I asked, ducking under a low-hanging branch.

"I've been circling, and I saw signs we were being followed. I wanted you to know before anyone else noticed in case you had your own plans."

I laughed. "My plans tend to be knee-jerk reactions. I hope you trust me, Conn."

"It's a little late to change my mind now. Hold on, my lady. It's going to get bumpy."

He urged his horse around trees, twisting back and reversing his tracks. The horse leapt off a small ledge, and I squeezed my eyes shut, but it landed neatly and kept running. After a couple of miles, we passed signs of a recent camp.

"We're close," Conn said. He let out a piercing whistle.

I flinched. "Warn a girl before you deafen her."

An answering whistle sounded, and Conn slowed the horse.

"What now?" I whispered.

"We wait for them to show themselves."

"And if they throw spears and shit first?"

"Then we made a mistake."

I half-turned to give him a withering glare. In the process, I spotted something out of the corner of my eye. Vix was leaning against a nearby tree, her arms folded across her chest.

"Are you alone?" I asked, getting off the horse.

She hesitated then shook her head and stepped toward me. Conn dismounted and joined us.

"They need to be right next to me. We were followed," I said. "How many more are here?"

"Just one," a familiar voice rumbled from behind me.

I whirled around to face the helmeted soldier striding toward us. "Rumble! I mean, Comhaill, sorry. I can't believe you're both here. What are you doing? Why are you following us?"

"In case there was trouble." Vix studied the ground. "And we needed to get you alone if we could."

"You could have been killed," I said. "Darksiders aren't the flavour of the month right now, especially you."

She raised her head and stared at me defiantly. "Then why are you two alive?"

"The Green Court took Fiadh in when I sent her to the Miacha with Conn and Setanta. They're travelling with us. Oh, and I forgot to give you this." I slapped her across the face. "That's for paralysing me, you crazy bitch."

She rubbed her cheek with a grin. "Oh, come on. It was a good plan. Even you have to see that."

"I can't believe you were going to kidnap my daughter. What were you thinking?"

She laughed. "It would have been one way to get you to follow."

Rumble held up his hand. "That was her idea, and she wasn't going to hand the child over to Sadler. Things have been getting worse."

"Yeah, we heard the ships can be seen approaching. How long do we have?" I asked.

"Not long," Rumble said. "Sadler's boasting about raising the dead."

"The Darksiders are divided. Half of them are ready to give him up." Vix clenched her hands into fists. "We need to... _save_ Sadler from himself before it's too late."

I heard a shout, and moments later, the clearing filled with armoured soldiers wearing the colours of both courts. The group surrounded us, Brendan and Drake at their head. The three Darksiders attempted to circle me in a human shield, but I pushed my way through and herded them back against the horse.

"Excuse me?" I said. "Am I being hunted down again?"

"Of course not," Brendan said, but he looked uneasy. "We thought you were being kidnapped."

"By Conn?" I asked as snidely as I could manage. "He made me jump from the carriage by the power of his mind, did he?"

"We weren't told that—"

I cut Brendan off with a sharp laugh. "What did Bran say? And Dymphna? And Fiadh?"

Brendan looked bashful. "We didn't stop to ask."

Drake unsheathed his short sword. "Death to the Darksiders."

The silver soldiers behind him raised their weapons.

"I don't think so," I said. "Not unless you're cutting through me first."

Drake sneered. "Even cowardly Darksiders won't let a human die for them."

"A queen!" Rumble's shout caused half of the soldiers to flinch. "She has a title, and it wasn't stolen... like _yours_."

"They'll do what I tell them to do," I said even louder to get their attention back on me. I needed to be in control of the situation to save my Darkside friends.

Vix let out a little whoosh of air. I stepped on her foot. "Not now," I murmured.

"Cara," Brendan said, "what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to meet some old friends," I said. "They had information for me."

Brendan dismounted and approached. "Lower your weapons," he ordered his soldiers in a weary voice. He looked at Rumble. "Why are you here? We're on our way to the Darkside. What were you planning on doing? Abducting her to get her there first?"

"No," Rumble said. "We came to save her life."

Brendan looked around at the soldiers. "You two can provide more protection than all of this?"

"Yes," Rumble said. "We weren't planning on walking her into danger."

"Things have changed," Vix said. "It isn't safe out there. We need the queen and the princess to survive. Our people are divided. Sadler's actions have caused... problems. Some Darksiders will kill her before she reaches Sadler in case she can reason with him. Others are so confused they'll start a fight without even realising it, and the child could be accidentally harmed in the middle of it all. You don't understand what's been happening, but we aren't about to let you lead our princess to her death." She looked at me. "And there's only ever been one person to temper Sadler. If we do this the right way, we can fix all of this."

"The dead should never walk," Rumble said. "And those rumours about the ships are killing any unity in the Dark Court. Chaos is in charge. We need to control it before it's too late."

"You're disloyal to your king," Drake said as he approached. "Why would we believe you if even your own king can't trust you?"

"I'm loyal to my court," Rumble said. "Sadler's been influenced by dangerous forces. I think he can still be saved. But if I'm loyal to the crown, then I need to be loyal to all of those who wear it, and that includes this woman and her child. If they return, Sadler will use the child. I _will_ protect them from all that mean them harm, including Sadler."

"We should kill them right now," Drake said. "This is a distraction."

"Both of these are Deorad's children, just like you," I said. "They're your family."

"I have no family," he snapped. "Deorad means nothing to me."

I glared at him, trying to hide the pain I felt at his words. "You're pretty good at denying family."

"This isn't getting us anywhere," Brendan said.

"Yeah, I know. We need to get back to the carriages," I said. "I'm not feeling good about leaving them stranded while they wait for us."

Vix looked surprised. "You're still going with them? After everything we've told you?"

"What if I can talk to the Darksiders? Apparently, there are lots of them attacking everything in sight within this forest." I threw Drake a dirty look. "Although, miraculously, we haven't even seen one group yet."

"The Darksiders are scattered," Rumble said. "But it's impossible to tell what side they take, if any."

"Then I'll just have to find out. What if we can unify them again and work toward—"

Drake turned to Brendan. "Do you hear this? Are we really going to allow her to gather forces for Sadler?"

"She's not doing it for Sadler," Brendan said, studying me. "And this could be the right path to take."

"There will be fighting," Vix told me, ignoring the two kings. "You can't sweet talk your way out of every battle."

"Okay," I said. "But it's better than Darksiders running around aimlessly, getting themselves and whoever else murdered."

"Then we're going with you," Rumble said.

"No," Drake said. "Darksiders can't—"

"Then she can leave with us," Vix said. "Darksiders protect their own, and she's one of us."

"So you finally think so?" I murmured then smiled at her scowl. "If other Darksiders see Fiadh and two of Sadler's most trusted people with me, maybe they'll fall in line."

"And what will happen when we reach the castle?" Vix asked. "Are you going to sic your friends on Sadler? On the court?"

"No," I said. "I'm the one who has to deal with Sadler, no matter what it takes." I looked at Rumble. "Are you with me?"

The burly soldier nodded. Vix grudgingly agreed, too, and we headed back to the carriages.

"I don't like this," Drake said.

"There are lots of things I don't like either," I told him. "But you never gave that any consideration." And then I galloped back to my daughter with three Darksiders at my back.

"This is good," Fiadh said.

"Yeah, it might be if they last the journey." I turned to Vix. "But you really need to stop threatening Drake's soldiers."

Vix sighed and took a sip of water from her cup. We had our own fire separate from the other soldiers. It was better that the others gave us some distance. The Darksiders weren't popular within the camp, but if the Green Court and Silver Court could work together, then they could put up with us, too.

_Us_. Strangely, I felt more comfortable around the Darksiders than I did with my old friends. There was too much bad history with Drake, too much awkwardness with Brendan, and the rest were all on one side or the other. The Darksiders had nothing but a wish to improve their lives. I could deal with that.

"She'll behave," Rumble said. He had been quiet all day, but I felt reassured by his presence. He still hadn't removed his helmet, and in full black armour, he looked far more intimidating than any of the green or silver soldiers.

Vix yawned then stretched, her shirt moving just enough to reveal bruised skin.

"What happened to you?" I asked.

She yanked her shirt down. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" I looked into the fire, thinking hard. "So Sadler just let you come to me?"

She let out a harsh laugh. "Not exactly, no."

"She was in the dungeon again," Rumble said. "Because Sadler heard she attacked the queen in the Green Court yet failed to bring the princess home."

Vix scowled at him. "Sadler sent me to the dungeon and... washed his hands of me. Rumble freed me, and we escaped together to try to bring a little... order back to the chaos." She gave Rumble a warning glance, and I was sure there was more to that story.

"I'm sorry if you got hurt doing that," I said.

She leaned back, her demeanour snapping back to its usual mode. "A little fresh air never hurt anyone." She changed the subject then, and I was left wondering what had really happened to her.

A few minutes later, Zoe approached us. She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to avoid looking directly at Rumble and Vix.

"Hey," I said. "Want to sit?"

"Scarlet's waking up," she said. "I thought you might want to know."

"Yeah, of course." I stood. "Okay, I'm going to bring the baby over. Just... be cool. Okay, Vix?"

"Me?" She sniffed. "I've seen the child before. One looks much like another."

"Yeah, yeah. Rumble, don't let her challenge anyone to a duel while I'm gone."

Rumble chuckled softly as I left with Zoe. Anya and Bekind had been watching over Scarlet while she slept and I dealt with the new additions, but I couldn't hide my baby away forever. If I was going to trust the Darksiders, then I had to trust them with Scarlet, too.

"Do you know what the hell you're doing?" Zoe asked as we climbed into the carriage.

"That's her aunt and uncle," I said, picking up Scarlet. "She's never going to have a father." Unless I helped him get what he wanted most. "The least I can do is give her whatever family I can."

"I hope you're right," Zoe said. "And I hope neither of you get hurt."

"Too late for me. And I'm never going to let my daughter get hurt."

"You can't protect her from everything."

"I can try."

Anya and Bekind followed us back to the fire. Bran, ever my shadow, fidgeted by my side.

"They're not going to do anything, Bran," I said with a smile.

"I've never been this close to so many Darksiders before," he said. "I feel a little out of my depth."

"Dymphna would never trust Eithne to Fiadh if there was a chance the Darksiders would do something wrong." I sat by the fire with a sleepy Scarlet. "Auntie Vix and Uncle Rumble," I said, enjoying the horrified expression on Vix's face. I kissed Scarlet's head. "This is my daughter."

"Vix said she wasn't tainted, but I was sure she had to be," Rumble said.

"Look at her eye," Vix said. "Cara told me something made its mark."

Rumble reached out as if to touch Scarlet's cheek but dropped his hand before he made contact.

"It's okay," I said. "You're her family."

Rumble and Vix exchanged a glance.

Rumble cleared his throat. "You can't talk like that. You must be seen to treat us as servants. We are the nameless. We don't get to have family."

"You have names," I said. "And you have family. I don't give a shit what anyone says. This is what's wrong with the Dark Court."

"You can't turn us into humans," Vix said. "You must stop trying to weaken us."

"My love for my son doesn't weaken me," Fiadh scoffed. "It makes me stronger, more able to do what needs to be done. Cara is the same way. The Dark Court needs to change."

"We are of Chaos," Vix said. "We're hated by everyone here. Nobody trusts us. They wish we didn't exist."

"Then we'll just have to remind them that we do exist," I said.

And when Vix smiled, I knew I had her.

# Chapter 20

I grew restless in the carriage. We moved so slowly that it felt as though we weren't actually getting anywhere. The heat became oppressive, a steady heaviness in the air that wore me out even though I wasn't active. The pair of kings might have beaten back Sadler's storms, but they had gone overboard in their attempts to keep hold of the power. I wondered if that had been Sadler's aim after all. Their exertion had to help him in the grand scheme of things.

Fiadh fanned Setanta rapidly until he reached out and pulled the fan from her grasp. Both of them stared at each other for a moment in shock. The boy rarely moved of his own free will, and he constantly looked miserable. It was as though he were afflicted by a physical manifestation of a deep depression, and I had begun to wonder if the way he was carried around and indulged had contributed to his state as much as the black welts on his skin.

"You musn't snatch," Fiadh said, but her lips were twitching. "Especially not so roughly."

Setanta gazed at the fan in his hand in wonder then weakly waved it.

"He's growing stronger," Fiadh murmured to me. "Even though we're returning home."

"You don't have to stay," I said. "It's not forever."

"I know, but I'm starting to believe his home is wherever your family goes. Have you seen him? How his strength grows in her presence?"

"I see it," I said reluctantly. "But I don't know what it means."

"It means we're on the right path." She slipped her hand in mine. "Whatever you choose to do."

I had no idea what the right path was, if I had ever been on it, or ever would be. But that didn't matter anymore. Throughout my life, I had set my limits and expectations as low as possible to avoid disappointment. I kept myself safe in ways that had only ever hurt me in the end. For all of my mistakes, my daughter was the one light in the darkness. I couldn't ask for anything more for myself, but for her, I'd ask for the sun and moon.

The carriage slowed, and Drake appeared at the door. "Get the child and ride out of here on Dubh. There's a Darksider camp nearby. If they attack, we need you ready to flee."

"Is it safe?"

"Safer than not being ready. Hurry, Cara. We can't risk losing either of you now."

When had my child become the saviour of the realm? I bit down on a smart remark, picked up Scarlet, and climbed out of the carriage. Rumble and Bran were waiting.

"They won't attack," Vix said from atop the carriage.

I shielded my eyes to look up at her. "Have you been there the entire time?"

She grinned. "I like the view."

I handed Scarlet to Bran so I could mount Dubh. "Do you know who's out there?" I asked Rumble.

"No. I would guess Darksiders who have been exiled or are in hiding from Sadler. He's locked up tight in his castle. There's no way he can spare soldiers right now."

"What about you?" I asked as he helped me onto the horse.

"Don't worry about me."

Bran planted a child-sized helmet on Scarlet's head then handed her to me. He gave me an apologetic smile. "We don't have time to properly prepare Dubh. You'll have to hold her in front of you. We'll surround you in case of trouble, but if it comes, you're to leave us behind." He cleared his throat. "I've been told to remind you that there's no going back to save anyone else this time."

I made a face and got as comfortable as possible. Scarlet gripped my arms tightly, but she looked more curious than scared.

"Move back a little," Vix called. "You'll unbalance yourself before you begin."

"Dubh won't let me fall," I said.

She somersaulted off the top of the carriage.

"Show-off," I muttered.

She smiled. "I prefer convenience over safety. In your case..." She adjusted Scarlet until we were both more comfortable. "Relax. The more tense you are, the more the child will be."

I tried to do as she said, but it was hard to relax when I had a tiny vulnerable being in my arms whom I was responsible for. Taking risks with my own life just wasn't the same anymore.

We walked the horses slowly into the shade, avoiding the sun. The carriages continued on their way, with us alongside them. Vix had gotten back up on the carriage. I was surrounded by Rumble, Bran, and Líle.

"What if I talked to them?" I asked in a low voice. "What if they decided they wanted to be involved in all of this?"

"What if they stab you through the heart?" Líle asked.

"They aren't going to hurt us. Look at how many soldiers we have. It would be pointless to attack us."

"Scared men do idiotic things," Bran said.

"And scared women do what's right," I retorted. "Look, this will be a good test of what's to come."

"I'll go," Rumble said. "If it's safe, I'll signal to Vix." He discreetly moved away from the group and headed into the forest.

Bran looked around with a worried expression. "The other soldiers are not going to let us leave the troop."

"So we'll need a distraction," I said. "We'll think of something."

Bran looked sick, but Líle just shrugged, as if she were fine with the idea.

"You're not going to try and talk me out of it?" I asked her.

"We all know that would be wasted breath," Líle said. "Besides, you would never let Scarlet come to harm. I'll trust you on this, even though I'm not sure what it is you're trying to do here."

"The more Darksiders we get on our side, the more chance we have of changing Sadler's plans. If those ships land, it'll be like a world war. All three kingdoms will have to fight together. That's what it'll take."

"If those ships land, none of us will live long enough to see that happen."

"So we should just give up?" I glared at her. "You made a promise to me, Líle."

She gave me a warm smile, her amber eyes glistening. "I did. And I even meant it."

A cawing sound came from the forest. Vix got up on her knees on top of the carriage. She glanced down at me, shrugged, then stood and faced the opposite direction. She extended her arm and waved.

"Get down!" one of the soldiers yelled. "Get her down from there before she signals the Darksiders."

Vix leapt off the carriage and sprinted into the woods. A number of soldiers broke ranks and charged after her.

"Now," I commanded and took off on Dubh in the direction Rumble had gone. I really hoped I didn't get us all lost.

Líle and Bran struggled to keep up. I had to credit Bran; he looked torn, but he came along anyway.

Nobody seemed to have noticed we were gone yet, so I pushed faster, desperate to reach the Darksiders and at least find out what was going on with them. The not knowing was worse. Scarlet let out a gleeful giggle.

"Daredevil," I whispered, tightening my hold on her.

The cawing sound came again, followed by the sound of Rumble's gravelly voice.

"We're over here!" I called. When Líle and Bran tried to shush me, I said, "What? We don't want to get lost."

"You need lessons in stealth," Líle said with a shake of her head.

A dry twig snapped to our left. Rumble stepped out from behind a tree, led by four Darksiders I had never seen. They weren't soldiers, far from it. Wingless, all but one had thick beards that covered half their faces, and their hair was overgrown and tangled. Their simple brown shirts and trousers were covered in muck and dirt. They held knives that looked more suited to skinning than stabbing.

A fifth walked behind them, his face creased with wrinkles where it wasn't covered in hair. When they reached us, he stood apart, as if he were in charge—or maybe because he didn't want to get too close to Rumble. I was pretty sure Rumble wouldn't have a problem breaking free, and he seemed uninjured. So we were playing it safe. I could handle that.

"Do you know who we are?" I asked the old man.

He observed me, holding his chin up high. His beard was streaked with mud as though he'd used the dirt in an attempt to darken the grey patches. "Enemies of mine. Hunting us every day and night. All we want is a place to sleep and food in our bellies. We've committed no crimes."

"Then why are you armed and holding my friend hostage?" I asked. "And I'm no enemy of yours. I haven't hunted you. I haven't deprived you of food."

"Nobody wants to be the one," he said, shaking his head. "Nobody ever wants to take the blame."

"Could you stop pointing your knives at him?" I asked. "He hasn't done anything to deserve that."

"I don't think you're the one to tell me that."

"Are you Darksiders?"

"We're no one nowadays. There's nothing in the Darkside for us. Nothing here, either, it seems. We won't hurt your man here if you walk away and leave us be. We saw the soldiers before. We hid. And still you come looking."

"If I get down off this horse, what will you do?" I asked.

"Cara, no!" Líle said.

I held the old man's gaze. "I just want to talk to you. That's all."

His eyes slid to Scarlet then back to me. "I reckon you won't be dangerous with the baby in your arms. Get down all you will, but there's nothing you have to say that the likes of us will want to listen to."

I carefully passed Scarlet to Líle so I could dismount. Bran started to get down to help me, but I waved him off.

"Who are 'the likes of you'?" I asked as I turned to face the old man. "Are you a tribe or a family or what?"

"I'm the head of the family," he said. "Our clan was... lowered by the king."

"Sadler?"

"Aye, him. We had no land, nothing. We tried to live, but nothing would grow. His soldiers were wild. That Fox is leading them to ruin, my wife always said."

"Is she here?"

"They killed her." His eyes hardened. "Killed her for nothing."

"Reynard is scum." I held up my ringed fingers. "And Sadler has lost his mind."

"You're the young wife?" He looked stunned. "The human wife that fed the people?"

My face burned. "I shared the food the midwife made Sadler get me. He wanted the baby to be healthy. He wanted to use her." I gestured at Rumble. "And this man helped me save her." I rolled up my sleeve and showed him the black veins. "This is what the Darkside gave me." I nodded at Scarlet. "But she wasn't harmed by the taint."

The old man peered at Scarlet. "That's not a child born in the Darkside."

I shook my head. "I was in labour when I left. She was born in this forest."

He studied me for a few moments before nodding at his family. "Let him be."

"What are you talking about?" the youngest protested. He looked to be in his mid-teens, and the veins in his neck were streaked with black.

"This one is the queen," the old man said with a strained laugh. "That makes the little girl our princess. Like it or not, we're Darksiders. We have the plague, but our princess is clean. If they got her clean, they can help you, too. Now don't be foolish."

"Why are you with the soldiers?" the youngest asked me.

The old man smacked the boy in the back of the head. "Don't ask stupid questions."

"We're going to the Darkside to try to end this war to Sadler," I said. "He's called reinforcements from across the sea."

The old man's face paled. " _No_. There's nothing good out there for us."

I nodded. "That's why we have to stop it. If something comes, we'll have to fight that instead of each other. The Green and Silver Courts are working together on this. And maybe Sadler will see how ridiculous this is if I talk to him."

A sly smile crossed the old man's face. "You mean the Darksiders might listen to you instead o' their king."

I grinned back. "That, too."

He looked at the others. "Well, go on, then. You heard her." When they stared at him blankly, he added, "We're going home alongside our queen."

"We'll die there," the youngest said.

"We'll die _here_ ," the old man responded. "We're not wanted. And this... _queen_ needs all of the help she can get if she wants to sway the Dark Court from chaos. Get a move on, lads. We've a lot of walking to do." He looked at me. "Ye have food, right?"

"Plenty."

"My name's Jackie, in case you were wondering. Those are my boys. They're all I have. The eldest is married, but his woman stayed behind with her family. Too scared to leave, they was. He came with us, said he didn't want to watch her die, too. They'll call this the Age of Death, you know. Or the era of war. The time with three kings when the queens had all the power." His smile turned sly again. "You must be a powerful kind of witch to have the ear of so many important people."

I tried my hardest not to shiver in front of him.

On our way back to the carriages, we bumped into a group of silver scouts who had been looking for us.

"I don't understand," a female scout said, sounding confused. "You voluntarily went to find these... people, and now you've brought them back with you?"

"That's exactly it," I said. "You're a bright spark. Congratulations. Where's Vix?"

"Who? Oh." She screwed up her nose. "The Darksider. In chains, walking behind the Silver King's horse."

"I'm going to kill him," I muttered. "Bran, can you go ahead and explain things to Brendan?" When he hesitated, I looked at Líle. "Um, maybe it should be you."

"I can do it," Bran said. "I can talk to the king."

"Try not to pee your pants," I said with a smile. "He's just a man."

Bran swallowed hard and set off.

One of the male scouts sneered. "I doubt my king wants this trash in his camp."

"Well, he puts up with you well enough," I retorted.

The old man chuckled. "This is the best fun we've had in weeks, boys."

I pulled Scarlet closer. She had been extra quiet, and I worried. Having so many Darksiders around was a gamble I had to take.

"Are you honestly going to keep a queen waiting?" Líle demanded. "Have you any idea how ridiculous you're being?"

"We're not stopping the queen," the head scout said. "We're stopping the tagalongs. How can we trust them? Who gets the blame when they assassinate a king in the dead of night?"

"Whoever failed to guard said king," Líle said. "The child is too small to be out for so long without food and drink. We're going back. Now. All of us."

"I don't think so," the scout said.

With a huff, Líle leapt off her horse and unsheathed her sword. "Do you think you're capable of stopping us?"

"Am I missing a party?" Brendan asked from the other side of the clearing. Drake came into view a moment later.

The scout snapped to attention and addressed Drake. "Sir, I was merely trying to—"

"Be an arse," I snapped. "This is what we came out here to do. What the hell is the problem now?"

"Then why did you sneak away?" Brendan asked good-humouredly. "If this is the plan, why all the subterfuge?"

"Oh!" I pointed at Drake. "If Vix has been chained or—"

"It was a threat I didn't execute," Drake said flatly. "Fiadh convinced us that it would cause more trouble than we need today."

"At least somebody has sense," Jackie said. He nodded at both kings. "Now, no trying to kill us. We're here for our queen, nothing more, nothing less." He grinned. "Well, maybe for the food, too."

"Seriously," I said. "Look at these people. These are the dangerous Darksiders haunting the Great Forest? Are you kidding me? Has anything you people told me been true?"

"We've been attacked," Drake said vehemently. "We don't distinguish between Darksiders or—"

"Your _daughter_ is a Darksider!" I hadn't meant to yell at him, but I just couldn't hold in my anger.

The entire group went silent as a veil of shock spread over us. It was the first time I had really said the words to him so directly.

I shifted uncomfortably as Scarlet gave a little moan of distress. "And she's tired and hungry, so can we all please go back to the carriages now?"

"Do you vouch for these men?" Brendan asked in his I'm-the-big-bad-king voice.

"Yes. They're _mine_ ," I stated.

The men flinched as one.

Jackie looked up at me with a curious expression. "Well, now. This is going to be interesting."

"Then they're safe," Brendan said. "Safe from my men, at least. But you know there will be trouble."

"Hey," I said. "We already eat apart. Why not have our very own Darksider camp just for the cool kids?"

"There's no need for segregation," Brendan said softly. "I'm sure we can all manage, as long as there is no provocation on your side."

"My side will behave," I said, wishing I could guarantee that. "And we'll stay friendly as long as everyone else stops treating my people like dirt."

"Your people?" Brendan tilted his head. "Well, your people look like they could use a good meal. I think we'll settle in early this evening and figure out tomorrow's route."

Drake looked at him in surprise. "You want to change the route?"

Brendan shrugged then gave me a knowing smile. "I'm sure our little queen will want to pick up a few more friends before we reach our destination. Safety in numbers. Isn't that what we've been saying all along?" He turned his horse. "There's a green army and a silver one. Let's see what Sadler makes of a chaos army."

I bit my lip to keep from displaying my triumphant smile.

# Chapter 21

The journey had been way less fun with so many stuck-up fae around, I decided as I looked around at my group. We were completely separated from the others. In their hatred of the Darksiders, the Green and Silver soldiers had banded together. The five newest Darksiders, known collectively as "Jackie and his boys," had built a nice bonfire. Jackie had taken charge of the cooking without actually touching the food, or even getting up off his arse for that matter. He chewed on a blade of grass in the evening dusk as his boys ran around following his orders. The youngest moved slowly, but he did his best to keep up.

"It's the least we can do," Jackie told me. "Given you're feeding us and letting us tag along."

"And here's me thinking you were doing me a favour."

He smiled around the grass. "That, too." He nodded at a group of Silver soldiers lingering nearby, their eyes never leaving us. "Not a friendly bunch, are they?"

I shrugged. "Who cares? Better company here."

The Miacha and Zoe joined us. Zoe touched my hand briefly, and Grey Eyes gently pinched Scarlet's cheeks.

"She's growing fast," Grey Eyes said. "And she's so good. Rarely a cry from her. She's a credit to you."

"I can't claim too much credit," I said with a smile. "She doesn't get that from me."

Jackie jumped to his feet so quickly that he lost his balance. He righted himself and inched toward Grey Eyes. "Can I get you anything? Tea or a quick snack before dinner's ready?"

"Oh." The Miacha sat down beside me. "Tea would be grand."

"Boys!" Jackie bellowed, making Grey Eyes jump. "The lady would like a sup of tea! Get to it!"

I exchanged a glance with Zoe, who looked as though she wanted to burst out laughing. I nudged her. I heard a giggle from behind me. I turned just in time to catch Eithne before she toppled into the fire.

"Eithne!" Dymphna scolded. "No running."

"She's okay," I said, putting the child back on her feet. "Isn't that right, Eithne?"

She gave me a shy smile and ran to hug her mother's leg.

"Eithne, why don't you sit beside Scarlet?" Zoe said and scooted over to make room.

"I don't want her to be any trouble," Dymphna said, looking awkward.

"She's not," I said. "I can watch her while you eat. I know this isn't the popular table."

Dymphna groaned. "I'd rather sit here. The rumours they spread about Darksiders are ridiculous. But I have to show my face tonight. They'll start to think I've changed sides."

"There's always time," I said with a grin. "Go on. She can play with Scarlet for a while."

When Dymphna left, Eithne began trying to teach Scarlet a clapping game.

"Isn't it weird how much is the same when everything is so different here?" Zoe said, watching the girls play.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I remember us doing things like that when we were tiny. And then your mam would sing along because she remembered the words from when she was a kid. It's just strange the things that get passed along." She gestured around us. "The things that work in both worlds."

"Used to be one world," Jackie said abruptly.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"One world. Co-existence. Way back when, there wasn't a—ah, here, lad, not her. The other lady!"

Jackie's eldest pulled his hand back to retrieve the cup he had just handed me. He stood there for a second, confused as he looked questioningly at Zoe.

I took pity on him and wrapped my arm around Grey Eyes. "The tea is for _this_ lady."

I turned to ask Jackie more questions, but he was already going on about how to make a proper cup of tea. By the time Jackie's boys finished making dinner, more people had crowded around us. Fiadh and Conn arrived with Setanta, who sat up by leaning against Conn so he could play with the girls. Bekind lay next to Setanta. Líle and Anya joined us, and even Bran was persuaded to take a seat for once.

Anya repeatedly glanced across the camp at Arlen, who stared sullenly at his hands while the kings talked. Half the camp was gossiping about Arlen and Anya and their arguments.

"Go sit with him," I told Anya.

She looked at me, eyes anguished, before turning away with a determined set to her jaw. "I like it better here."

I noticed that Vix and Rumble weren't with us. "Can you watch the girls for a minute?" I asked Zoe. Once she agreed, I set off to find my missing friends.

I discovered them sitting by the carriages. "It's dinnertime," I said.

Vix raised one eyebrow. Rumble wore his helmet, so I had no idea what his reaction was.

"Did you have a point?" Vix asked.

"Yeah, actually. It's dinnertime, and you're not at the table with the rest of the family."

She looked at me as if I had lost my mind. "There's no table. And not a whole lot of family going on."

"It's a figurative table, and there's plenty of family to go around. Just come sit down and eat with us and stop being so bloody stuck up."

"Stuck up? Me?" She dramatically pressed her hand against her chest as if I had just emotionally scarred for life. "And this from a—"

"We'll eat," Rumble said.

He stood and clutched Vix's arm to pull her to her feet. To my surprise, she allowed him to tug her over to the group.

I beamed. "Be right after you," I called after them.

Next, I headed over to the area where Arlen was. All conversation stopped as I approached.

"Is Eithne giving you trouble?" Dymphna asked.

"Not at all," I said. "I just came over to ask Arlen if he wanted to sit with us tonight. Jackie's boys made way too much food."

"And Arlen's the only one with an invitation?" Brendan asked in mock horror.

"Of course not." I gave him an innocent smile. "Dymphna's invited, too."

"I'm not wanted there," Arlen said in a sulky voice.

"Grow up," I said. "Why would I have walked all the way over here to ask you if you weren't wanted?"

He hung his head. "Thanks, but no thanks."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I give you the impression that you had a choice?"

He glared at me. "An invitation is not an order, and a human Darksider consort can't order me around."

"Well, aren't we bitchy today?" I put my hands on my hips. "Listen, you big child, get a grip and man up, or you're going to lose Anya for good. What are you doing? You want her with you so you push her away? How does that make sense?"

He clenched his hands into fists. "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure I don't. When you find your balls, you know where to find us." I spun to head back.

Brendan reached out to grab my hand. "If we aren't invited to the special dinner the Darksiders have cooked, why don't you stay and have a glass of the special wine we brought with us?"

I grinned and patted his shoulder. "I don't need wine to feel special."

I walked away, feeling good. I felt even better when only a few minutes after I sat down, Arlen joined us, taking his rightful place next to Anya. She gave him a hopeful glance, and he managed to eke out a smile.

"Better than nothing," I whispered.

"What was that?" Grey Eyes asked.

"Oh, nothing. I'm surprised we haven't seen your sisters yet."

"Give it time. The birds know the babe is on the move. If they can, my sisters will come running to see her again."

"The birds know?"

She smiled, her leathery skin wrinkling. "Almost everything here has ears and a tongue. Word spreads."

As the evening wore on, it became clear from the noise level that our group was the only one having any fun. I relaxed a bit. Just a little farther, and then it would be done.

Jackie poked his head through the window of the moving carriage. "Darksiders watching us."

"Great," I said. "Let's stop and talk—"

"No, no." He shook his head so hard he almost fell through the window. "You don't want these. They're savages."

"People say that about all Darksiders. Don't be ridiculous, Jackie."

He gave Zoe and Scarlet a pointed look. "Let me and one of my boys have a word first. Put the old feelers out and see how the tide is flowing. Trust me on this one, queenie. This clan is not like the others."

Something in his voice, a tremble of fear, set my nerves on edge. "Fine. Take Rumble. Be quick, though."

He disappeared, leaving me rattled. The black cat flew out the window after him.

"What was that about?" Zoe asked.

I peered out at the trees, but I couldn't see a thing. "I'm not sure."

"Maybe we should listen to him," Anya whispered. "There were savage tribes long before the Darkside came into existence."

"Maybe." I waved at Bran, who was riding beside us. "Let me know when you see Rumble and the others return." I sat back in my seat and waited anxiously.

An hour later, I heard a distant roar. The carriage was brought to a halt, and the guards surrounded it, their horses forming a shield.

After a few minutes, Bran shouted, "It's okay!"

"We need help here!" Jackie yelled.

"Líle, stay with Scarlet," I ordered.

Without waiting for a response, I leapt out of the carriage to see what was happening. Grey Eyes jumped down from another carriage and ran past me. We caught up with Rumble, who was carrying Jackie's youngest son. Jackie walked by his side, his face pale and streaked with blood. Rumble's sleeve was torn, and blood dripped from a wound there. Jackie's boy had no obvious injuries, but he was unconscious. I was vaguely aware of Brendan and Drake approaching.

"What happened?" I asked.

"They wanted a tithe because we trespassed on their territory," Jackie said, "so they tore into the big fella. He fought them off, but on the way back..." He shook his head. "My boy has the taint. He's weakening with it. He wasn't hurt."

Grey Eyes had Rumble lay the boy on the ground, so she could tend to him. She rolled up his sleeve, and I hissed at the sight of his arm. Just like Setanta's, the boy's skin was covered in wart-like growths. I should have realised from the black veins spidering his neck.

"He'll be fine," Grey Eyes said, patting his shoulder. "He just needs a bit of nourishment and release. Fetch me some clean water."

To my horror, she took out a knife and sliced his arm along one of the black welts. Instead of blood, black liquid seeped out of the cut. I tore my eyes away and went to check on Rumble's arm.

"It's nothing," he said uneasily.

Ignoring his attempt to be manly, I rolled up his sleeve. "Holy...! Is that a bite?"

Drake swooped over and stared at the wound. "What did this?"

"The tribe in the woods," Rumble said, inching away from the Silver King.

I frowned in confusion. "Somebody bit you?"

"Cannibals," Jackie said, still kneeling next to his boy. Brendan had brought over some water, and Jackie was trying to force his son to drink it.

"Cannibals?" I echoed. "Seriously?"

"I'm very serious," Jackie said. "Wake up now, lad. There's a good boy." He helped his son sit up, but the boy still looked woozy.

"Bandage his arm and put him in my carriage," I said. If Scarlet had helped Setanta gain some strength just from being in his proximity, then perhaps she could do something for Jackie's son, too.

Rumble cleared his throat. "The cannibal tribe was driven out of the Darkside by Reynard. They were offended by our suggestion to join us and wished for a... sacrifice. They'll be coming this way. If they don't find something, they'll follow."

"I vote for something silver," Jackie said. "We could use less of the bad attitude."

"How dare you?" Drake demanded.

"There will be no sacrifices," Brendan said firmly. "We'll leave food we've hunted."

"And if they come after us?" Drake asked.

Brendan gave me an apologetic look. "Then we'll kill them all."

I heard rushing water outside the carriage and leaned through the window. Though miles away, the massive River Garbh was visible in the distance. The cannibals hadn't followed us after we left the cover of the forest, but the scouts were kept on constant alert. Jackie's son had improved dramatically, and the family gave Grey Eyes all of the credit, but I was betting Scarlet had some influence in his recovery.

The incident with the cannibals had shaken my confidence, but the sight of the River Garbh crashing against the shore gave me an idea.

"Bran!" I called. "Can you do me a favour? Tell Brendan I need to get out."

"Get out?"

"Yeah." I pointed at the river. "I need to go over there."

"I'm not sure—"

"Hurry, Bran. It's important, I swear."

He nodded and galloped away.

I waved Rumble over. "Will you come with me to the river?"

He hesitated before agreeing.

Vix steered her horse a little closer. "Queens don't ask for favours."

"No sunbathing on top of the carriage today?"

Her upper lip curled. "It's been invaded by a small man and his sons. I'd rather ride alone."

"Shocking."

"Whatever you do, don't ask Darksiders for favours. Order them. Don't even let them think they have an option."

"You mean, be like Sadler?"

"I mean that you need to act like a queen. And Sadler has lessons to teach, too. He managed to acquire a kingdom, after all. That's no small feat."

"I've noticed. What do you think of the new additions?"

She gave me a scornful glance. "Weaklings, but numbers are always useful. We need more blood like Fiadh's."

"I'd take more like you and Rumble."

She threw back her head and laughed. "Flattery. Has it come to this?"

Brendan and Bran rode up to the carriage. Brendan had obviously been bored because he looked eager to hear what I had to say.

"Where are we going?" he asked.

"I don't know what _you're_ doing, and isn't the why more important to you?"

He shrugged. "I've given up worrying. What's so important out here? We're merely travelling this way to avoid being seen by creatures that like to hide in the forest."

"I'm pretty sure it's impossible to hide all of"—I waved my arm out the window—"this. Anyway, I want to go to the river."

"And then?"

"Talk."

He reached out and pressed his palm against my forehead. "A little warm."

"The water fae, doofus. I think we could use them. They'll be the first to know if ships are arriving."

He pondered that for a moment, and I could almost hear his brain ticking. "That's a good point. We'll need to discuss it with—"

"I swear, if you say you need to ask Drake first, I'm going to punch you. You're a king. You don't need to ask his permission."

His eyes glittered, making me fight the urge to shrink from his glare. "Don't push your luck."

"I won't if you let me go. You know it's a good idea, don't you?"

"I'm accompanying her," Rumble said.

"I'll go, too," Brendan said. "I want to hear what these water fae have to say."

Drake rode out from behind the carriage. "And they've sworn fealty to Sadler, remember?"

"They helped me," I said. "On the way back from the Fade, they gave me the right directions. They didn't try to stop me, and they didn't tell Sadler."

"You can't know that," Drake said.

"I lived with him as his wife," I said sharply. "I know lots of things."

Drake and Brendan looked away, both shifting in their saddles. Making them uncomfortable was exactly the reaction I wanted.

"I'm doing this," I said.

"Think about it," Drake said earnestly. "After what happened with the cannibals, do you really want to do this? You've seen how risky it is to side with Darksiders."

"I've seen that there are bad eggs everywhere. What's the worst that could happen?"

"Never say that," Vix grumbled.

I took a deep breath. "We don't have a choice. We need the help, and I'm not too proud to ask for it. If they agree, we'll have a huge advantage."

"It may be a decent idea," Brendan said after a moment.

Drake let out an exasperated sigh. "We should all go officially then."

"And make a big deal over it?" I asked. "They're not going to talk if they see soldiers hanging around. You're their enemy."

"What if just the three of us go?" Brendan said. "The others can wait behind and keep watch."

"That's dangerous," Drake said.

"We can see for miles in every direction," Brendan said. "What harm can it do? Besides, if the worst happens, I'm sure there's something we can come up with. Power shared..."

Drake shrugged. "She's not going alone. And they likely won't talk if we go in guns blazing. You're right. Three of us should go."

"It'll be like old times," Brendan said. "But you should really let your wife know where you're running off to."

Drake glared at him before riding away.

"Come on," Brendan said. "You can ride with me."

I kissed Scarlet then left the carriage. I pointed at Bran. "You better watch over her."

He nodded, and I climbed atop Dubh in front of Brendan. He slipped his arms around my waist before I could stop him. "It's been depressing riding alone." He squeezed my waist. "You feel different."

I shoved his hands away, embarrassed. "That's because I've had a baby, you prick. Back off."

He laughed instead of snapping back at me. I had missed that about him. Almost everything rolled off his back, and he never dredged up old arguments. That was all that ever happened when Drake and I spoke.

"Tell me," he said, "why are you acting as though different means something bad?"

"Because. Just shut up."

He grasped my chin and turned my head until I faced him. "Do you honestly feel less than now?"

"I don't want to talk about it, okay?" I truly didn't feel the same since the pregnancy. I didn't recognise my own body anymore, and whenever I looked in the mirror, a stranger stared back.

The humour left his face, and he brushed his thumb across my cheek. "It's a beautiful thing to create a life. I think motherhood becomes you."

My stomach did a somersault. I couldn't bear it, so I looked away before I said something I would likely regret. Confidence wasn't something I wore well, and I was still getting used to the changes motherhood had brought. And according to a prophesying mirror, I wouldn't recognise myself in the future either.

It had been over a year, and Brendan still looked at me in the exact same way he had before I knew I was pregnant, before I spent time in Sadler's court, before my heart grew dark and mean. He was the only one who treated me the same as before, not as a victim or a murderer or anything else. I knew how to deal with failure and rejection; I couldn't handle anything else. Not as me.

Brendan cleared his throat. "What are you going to say to the water fae?"

"I hadn't thought that far ahead," I admitted.

His laugh was his usual one, which made me feel relieved. He never made life awkward when I pulled away from him. But I was never sure if that was because he really didn't give a shit or for some other reason. Sometimes, he could have fooled me.

Drake returned with a sour-looking Sorcha. "This is a stupid move," she said.

"It's our best chance to get a heads-up on those ships," I said.

"That's not what I..." She held up her hands. "Never mind. Go. If there's trouble, they all die."

"She means she'll send the soldiers in after us," Brendan whispered.

But I kept picturing Sorcha's face when she drew the life from the lineage consultant. I definitely didn't want to see that again.

The three of us trotted toward the river on the two horses until all we could hear was the rushing of the water and our own voices. Reaching the calmer part of the river where I had once met the water fae took us all afternoon, and I felt uncomfortably hot. I had crossed the river twice, both times chased by Darksiders. The memories and feelings and consequences came rushing back.

"This is weird," I said unsteadily. "I crossed this river in labour. How screwed up is that?" I shook my head. "I barely even remember..." I pointed at the water. "If we get up close, they'll come to us. Maybe."

Brendan nudged me. "Maybe?"

"It's not like I've done this often. Maybe I should have brought Fiadh or someone. She'd know what to do."

Brendan snorted. "She might as well be a pampered princess. She'd be no use."

"She's had it tough," I said. "Leave her alone."

"Do what you do best," he urged. "Figure out how to survive. You can do this. You don't need Fiadh or anyone else."

"Not even you?" I joked.

"You have everything you need already. I'm just the cherry on top."

I laughed, earning a glare from Drake.

We finally reached the water. There was no movement apart from the waves. The Hollows and the only visible source of the river stood on the horizon. We were miles away from the Hollows, but the current was still strong, perhaps even too rough for the water fae.

"Maybe it was farther than I remember," I said. Then I thought I saw something dart under the water. "Wait. Did either of you see that?"

We got off the horses and moved closer to the bank.

"I don't see anything," Drake said. "Are you sure about this?"

I shrugged. "If they want to talk, they'll show themselves."

"I remember you." The female voice came from across the river. Weeds over there moved aside as if they had a life of their own, and a tentacled woman appeared. She swam most of the way across. "Are you lost again, little girl?"

"I know where I am," I said firmly.

"And do you know where you're supposed to be?"

I decided to ignore that. "I need to ask you something."

"Is it about your beaten little scouts? They left days ago."

"Scouts?" Drake asked. "You saw them?"

"Yes," she said. "One of the Fox's pack led them to us, bloodied and bruised."

Brendan pushed his hair off his forehead. "What happened to them?"

"They went home, of course," she said, sounding offended at the question. "Do you think we have use for men who can't even breathe underwater? They headed to the main road to find their keepers."

Drake exchanged a relieved glance with Brendan. "Reynard must have let them go, and they probably tried to find us. We took a different route and missed them."

"Reynard would never let them go," Brendan said.

"The Fox's pack are not as loyal as he thinks," the water fae said. Giggles came from the reeds behind her.

"Thank you," Brendan said sincerely.

I just hoped the water fae was being truthful. "Do you still swear fealty to the Chaos Court?"

"We haven't rescinded our fealty, but—"

"Then that makes me your queen." I held up my hand. "And I want to stop this war before it begins. Before more people die for no reason."

The woman let out a laugh that bordered on hysterical. "How the fates play us. You can't stop a war."

"But you're water fae. So you know what's in the water. You know what Sadler is bringing here."

She seemed to shrivel before my eyes. "I know the whispers."

"Then you can be the first warning," I said. "As soon as you see them arriving, you have to warn us—you, your people, any kind of water fae who will cooperate."

"Warn you?" She looked at Drake and Brendan. "What is this? Kings and queens running around the Darkside as if there's no tomorrow." She sank halfway into the water. "And there may not be, at that."

"Whatever's coming across the water, from _under_ the water"—I gave her a meaningful look—"won't distinguish between one court or the next. Everyone will die. And they'll land here, so who do you think will be first?"

A number of splashes erupted in the middle of the water.

I held the water faery's gaze. "I need you, but maybe we all need each other. War is coming, and we need to do what we can to stop it. I'm going to face Sadler and find a way to stop his deals with his god, but I might fail, and it'll be up to you all to find help." I swallowed hard. "And to save yourselves before the end comes. I understand that you're loyal to Sadler, so I'm going to leave you with this request. If you see the ships, pass on the word. If they get close, tell anyone who will listen before hiding. Go to the human realm if you have to."

"Is it that bad?" she asked, her eyes filling with water that spilled over like a waterfall.

"It's worse."

Feeling that I had done all I could, I motioned at the two kings, and we mounted the horses.

As we turned to ride away, a lone voice cried, "I will do it!"

Another repeated the vow, then another, and another, until it seemed as if the land itself were crying out to be on our side. A shadow crossed my path, and I looked up at the sky. A white raven flew overhead then disappeared amongst the clouds.

# Chapter 22

The moment we crossed into the Darkside, I had felt the shift in the air, but nothing made the hairs on my arms stand up like the sight in the valley. There had once been tribes living there, but their huts were empty, blackened and broken, completely destroyed.

"What happened here?" I asked Vix. A crow flew past, cawing harshly.

"Sadler sent Reynard to burn out the Darksiders and force them back into the castle," she said. "Safest for him, but these people were no warriors."

"There won't be enough food to feed them," I said. "So what happens then? What does he plan on doing with them?"

"They'll be his first line of defence," Rumble said from behind me. I turned to see him holding Scarlet. She kept reaching for his helmet, but it was too heavy for her to move. "She woke up," he added.

"Thanks." I stepped away from the sight of the burned-out valley and took my daughter from him. I held her close. "They'll all die."

"They'll die of starvation or sickness before this war," Rumble said. "When you left, he stopped sending out for food."

We walked back to camp. The servants were still setting up the tents and building fires.

"Who did he expect to kill me if he didn't want anyone out of his sight?" I asked.

"Anyone but Darksiders." He sighed. "If I guessed, I would say he was hoping one of Brendan's people would do it and spark off something between the Green and Silver Courts."

"It doesn't matter anymore," Vix said. "We lose the power as soon as those ships arrive."

"The water fae said they would warn us when the ships arrived. We'll have time to figure something out."

"The water fae will betray you," she said bitterly. "They don't live on this land. Their water isn't tainted yet. They can move freely. They won't care about this."

"They sounded like they cared," I persisted. "And if there's no point to all of this, then why are you here?"

She shrugged. "Because miracles seem to happen around you." She gave me a mischievous smile. "And I'm dying to see your face when you realise you can't save yourself, never mind anyone else."

I patted her shoulder. "That's what I like about you, Vix, always with the optimism. See you two later." I went off to find Zoe.

As I strolled along the edge of the camp, I became aware of the cawing that seemed to accompany me constantly. I looked up and saw two crows.

"They're just scavenging," Brendan said from my left. "There's no need to worry."

I shuddered. "I feel like they're watching me."

He reached out and plucked Scarlet from my arms. "This child needs to walk. You carry her overmuch."

"Excuse me? Tell me all about your parenting qualifications, and then we'll talk."

He grinned. "Silly mammy you have there, Scarlet. You're strong, aren't you?" He set her down on the ground. She looked tiny next to him. He grinned as she took a few steps then stopped to pull up a flower. "Another Kelly with a flower obsession. You do realise people will call her Scar, don't you?"

"Don't you dare," I said.

Scarlet stumbled, but Brendan caught her before she fell.

"Ha!" I said. "Look who's mollycoddling now."

He sat on the grass and patted a patch next to him. "Sit and relax. There's nothing we can do. You make me nervous when you fidget so much."

I willed my hands to stop moving. "I don't fidget." I sat next to him and watched Scarlet toddle around in front of us. "Do you think anyone is still alive?"

"In the valley?" He shook his head. "Not now. There's no sign of life down there."

"Vix told me that Reynard was sent to destroy their homes to force them back to the castle. Sadler's going to use those people as shields."

"Coward," Brendan said sharply.

"That's the first time I've ever heard you sound like you blame him."

"I tried for peace," he said. "Really, I did. But it's impossible to appease a madman. There will never be a chance of peace. Not as long as we both live." He gave me a hesitant glance. "But my feelings have changed. The idea of peace no longer appeals. I find myself wanting to destroy him in the worst way. I wake up at night after dreaming of his suffering, and for a moment, I feel... happy."

"You said you didn't want to be that kind of man again."

"I warned you how the power changes us. It takes time, but it seeps into every pore until you lose yourself completely."

"I keep thinking about the mirror," I said slowly. "I looked as though I had lost myself."

He reached out and curled his fingers around mine. "Maybe we can help each other remember who we really are. Maybe all any of us needs is somebody to keep us tethered."

I gazed at him, surprised by how his words made me feel. The loneliness threatened to overwhelm me, and I squeezed back.

The harsh caw of a crow startled me. It dived straight at Scarlet. I launched myself in front of her and faced the crow as it hovered before my face. It opened its mouth, but no sound came out, and the look in its eyes was scarily intelligent. After what seemed like hours but could only have been a matter of seconds, the bird flew up into the air and was soon gone from sight.

I checked to make sure Scarlet was okay. Busy plucking flowers, she seemed oblivious to the odd event.

"That was fu—" I caught the swear word midway out of my mouth. I really needed to watch my language around Scarlet. "Um... that was really weird."

"Brave bird," Brendan said, but he looked unsettled. "I don't think we should stay here very long."

I didn't see another crow until later that day when we all sat around to eat. Six of the black birds circled overhead then darted down toward us, one by one.

Vix ran across the clearing and grabbed a bow and a quiver from one of Brendan's soldiers. The birds soared high then circled again. Suddenly, all six veered off in different directions as if by unspoken command. I briskly rubbed my arms in an attempt to shake off the chill, but nothing could warm the cold feeling I had inside.

Zoe and I played with the children after dinner. Zoe told Setanta stories about the human realm. He asked questions, and his cheeks flushed with pinkish tones.

"How are you feeling, Setanta?" I asked. "It must feel strange to come back home."

"My home's with you," he said, startling me. "Mother said we belong to you now."

"No," I said. "Nobody belongs to me. You're free people."

"Are we all going to die?" he asked in a matter-of-fact tone.

"You're going to live," I said. "You're wouldn't want to leave Eithne and Scarlet alone, would you?"

His smile was sudden. "Never. I'm getting stronger. I can use a dagger. I can protect them, even like this"—he waved a hand across his lower body—"and when I get older, my legs will work, and I'll be a soldier like Conn."

"I look forward to that," I said.

Conn came to take Setanta and Eithne back to their mothers, leaving Zoe and me alone with Scarlet. I had watched Scarlet for signs, but she hadn't once reacted negatively to being in the Darkside. In fact, she had taken her first steady steps there, amidst camp—much to the confusion of everyone else when Zoe, Anya, Bekind, Líle, and I began to cheer her on like lunatics.

"It feels weird here," Zoe said, "like something's crawling across my skin, something I can't see."

"Yeah, way to creep me out, Zo."

She laughed. "Sorry. It's just... new to me."

"I know. You'll get used to it. It used to bother me, but now it's nice and familiar."

She studied me. "Familiar like home?"

I shrugged. "It wasn't all bad here. And once I deal with Sadler, things will change."

" _Deal_ with him?" She shook her head. "Can I say something? You won't get that big soldier to behead me or anything, right?"

I shoved her good-naturedly. "Of course not, idiot."

"Good." She scooped up Scarlet and cuddled her. "I'm worried about you, Cara. You're like a different person here."

"That's because I have to be."

"But you expect Drake to do something different?"

I stared at her, dumbstruck. "That's not how it is."

"Isn't it? Avoiding him isn't going to make any of this easier for you."

"He's always with his wife. It's not like I can sit there and smile and pretend that everything is okay. He broke my heart!"

"You told me you weren't even sure if you loved him. I think you're just doing it again—pinning your hopes on someone unavailable because you haven't got a clue what to do with somebody who actually shows you how he feels."

"Are we really doing this right now? The world could basically end here, and you want to talk about my lack of a love life? _Again_?"

She continued as if I hadn't spoken. "You didn't even try to move on when you came back, but I'm finding it hard to work out who it is here that you're hung up on. Maybe you haven't noticed, but the chemistry between you and Brendan is ridiculous. I mean, what are you waiting for? Drake is married. He can't undo that. It's _over_. So why are you hanging on?"

To my horror, tears sprang to my eyes. I pulled my knees to my chest and hid my face. She was right. It _was_ over. I knew it. I hadn't exactly been in a relationship with him, ever. So why was I holding on to my anger and bitterness, dwelling on the idea that he had rejected me or owed me something? Why was I letting myself feel like some kind of victim? Was I really so comfortable with pain that I was happy to sit in a limbo of my own making instead of moving on?

I had my excuses, my justifications for feeling as I did. Everyone who was ever supposed to love me had rejected me by withholding their love or disappearing from my life, or in one case, even taken his own life, all because of something about me. But Zoe hadn't. She was still here, still my best friend. So why couldn't I focus on that instead of the negatives? Why did I allow the past to mark me so deeply that I couldn't let myself have a future?

Zoe rubbed my back, muttering apologies that I knew she truly meant because she really did care about me. She had always been there, and even knowing that I was planning on doing things she didn't agree with on any level, she was still with me.

"No," I mumbled. "You're right. It's over, except it never really started. He was clear from the start. He never promised me anything. He warned me about the way things were, and I just... I don't even know. And if you really knew Brendan, knew the things he was capable of, you wouldn't want that for me."

"I don't care about people's pasts, Cara. I care about how they treat my friends."

I raised my head and peered at her through teary eyes. "And if you really knew _me_ , you wouldn't be sitting there thinking of me as a friend."

"A friend isn't there just for the good times. They stick around even when it's tough and unpleasant. Someday, you're going to have to accept that somebody out there cares about you enough to do that, Cara."

"I know you care, but this place turns everything on its head. Here, you have to change, or you won't survive. _I_ have to change enough so that Scarlet doesn't have to. I have to become something I hate just so I can protect her." I sniffled. "But it's never really been about the men, Zoe. It's the realm I fell in love with, the magic and the danger and the secrets. That's what I'm holding on for."

"What does that mean?"

I shook my head. "I'm just emotional. Ignore me." I frowned. "You look really pale. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just tired. All of this travelling is wearing me out. And then the heat makes it worse."

"Go get some rest. We'll be leaving as soon as the sun begins to rise. You'll get better sleep here than on the road."

"You'll be okay?"

I plastered on a smile. "I'm perfect. Go rest. Share a carriage with me tomorrow?"

"Only if you promise to tell me later about everything that's bothering you." She stood and passed my half-asleep daughter to me.

"Agreed."

I smiled as she waved and turned away, but inside, the crushing doubt grew almost too much to bear. I cradled Scarlet. As if she knew I needed comfort, she settled in against me until she dozed off.

After a while, Brendan came over and sat next to me. We watched the sun go down, and I felt a little less alone.

A wrenching scream tore me from my dreams. I bolted upright and checked for Scarlet. She was still asleep. I then scrambled across the ground to Zoe. She was thrashing under her blanket, her eyes wide and unseeing.

"Zoe, wake up," I urged, thinking she was having a nightmare of some kind.

Líle joined me. "What's happening?"

"I don't know. Hold her arms before she hurts herself." I patted Zoe's face. "Please wake up."

Zoe screamed again. Her voice cracked and broke as if her vocal cords had just given up. More people began to stir.

"What's going on?" Brendan asked.

"I can't wake her," I said.

"Move aside," Grey Eyes said briskly. "You won't wake her. She's caught in a delusion. We need her to sleep. Sleep will protect her before the madness can take her."

"Madness?" I felt ill. "What madness?"

"Not now." Grey Eyes looked around. "I'll need another pair of hands. Not you," she added sternly, pointing at me. "Somebody calmer."

My hands were shaking. "Is she losing her mind? Is it this place?"

Grey Eyes took my hands in hers. "Yes, and if I don't help her right now, we'll lose her. Let me work."

"I'll help you," Fiadh said.

Grey Eyes nodded at Fiadh. "Water. Just enough to crush some herbs into a potion." She looked over at Líle. "You can help keep her steady. It'll be a long night."

"I'm ready," Líle said.

Brendan pulled me back. "Sit down back here out of the way. Anya has Scarlet, and I'll stay with you. You can watch them work and see that they know what they're doing. This is just the first seizure. It won't cause lasting damage."

I blinked a couple of times. "You know how it happens. Tell me."

"Sit, and I will."

I practically collapsed to the ground. He sat and put his arm around me. I relaxed against him, eager to share the worry.

"Tomorrow, she'll think it was a dream," he said softly. "And then you'll send her away because it's this place that's hurting her. It's too much for her already."

"I did this to her. This is all my fault. If it wasn't for me, she wouldn't even be here."

"She came to you. She could have left, but she's almost as stubborn as you are."

"Why her? Why didn't this happen to me?"

"We thought it did," he said. "The night you found the mirror. Drake insisted it was the madness. He was mad with grief and worry. I promised him you'd come out of it, that you would be okay, but I think that sealed the deal for him. He had to send you away for your own sake. He was wrong, but his feelings clouded his decisions."

Zoe shrieked as if she were being burned with hot pokers.

I winced. "I never went through this. This is just awful."

"It gets worse," he said. "It might be weeks until the second seizure, but it's always much worse. And then the others follow until the weight of it is just too much. Their minds can't cope, so they sort of shut down, shut themselves away. The seizures come less often then, but only a shell remains behind. It's no life."

"What about Ronnie?" I asked to distract myself from the violent way Zoe's body was jerking against Líle's hold. "Did she go through this?"

"Probably, but I think she was one who clung to sanity, who kept a smidgen of herself with her. That's even more dangerous than losing it all."

"I noticed."

People grew bored and went back to bed, many of them grumbling about the noise. Sorcha and Drake hadn't appeared at all. To my surprise, Vix and Rumble both offered their help to Grey Eyes. Even Bekind stayed close, ready to help if needed. Mostly, she paced, and I remembered that she had probably seen a lot of Zoe when she had watched over me. Brendan tried to smother a yawn.

"Most people are going back to sleep. You should, too." I swallowed hard. "I'll be fine."

"I know you will. But I want to stay here."

"I should be over there with her," I said, feeling a sob hiccup inside me. "She needs me."

"You'll just distract everyone." He took one of my hands.

"She's my best friend. I'd do anything for her. I love her." Surprised by my own admission, I repeated in wonder, "I love her."

"What?" he asked. "Did you not realise how you felt about her?"

"Sometimes I think I don't know how to love people. Like... that part of me is broken. Does that make sense?"

"Yes," he breathed. "More than you realise."

I looked into his eyes and felt a kind of kinship with him. He was probably playing with me out of boredom, but for once, I decided to think that he was being a friend, that he truly cared. For once, I let myself believe that people could be good, no matter what had gone before. For once, I let myself find comfort. And when Zoe cried out huskily as if she were in pain, I hid my face against his neck and let him hold me.

When Zoe awoke the next morning, she stretched then jumped with fright when she noticed me sitting next to her, staring.

"Creepy," she muttered. "What are you doing?"

"You don't remember last night," I said, my last spark of hope dying. Zoe was succumbing to the faery madness.

"What are you on about? Are you okay? You look exhausted."

"You had a kind of seizure last night. If you stay, it'll happen again and again, until one day, you won't wake up from it. So you have to go home. Today."

She sat up. "Home? Today? _Leave_ you?"

I kept my voice steady. "I'm sending you away. You don't have a choice. If you stay... never mind. You can't stay."

Her eyes filled with tears. "Then come with me, Cara. Don't stay here if it's so dangerous."

"It's not dangerous for me," I said. "I haven't had this kind of seizure." _Yet._

"You'll kill him if I leave," she whispered.

"You knew?"

"I guessed. I have to be here to remind you of who you really are. You'll turn into a different person if I go."

My own tears started to fall. "I know."

She wrapped her arms around me. "Come with me. Let's take Scarlet home and forget the fae. Let's just go back to being normal."

"I'm in too deep." I wiped my face on my sleeve. "I don't want to go back. I need to finish this. I need to do _something_."

"You're my best friend," she said. "I feel like I'm never going to see you again."

I gripped her hands. "No matter what, I'll always be there for you. I'll find a way, Zo. I'll come home."

"This is your home now," she spluttered. "You fell in love with the realm, remember?"

"Who says I can't have two homes? I'm going to see you again. We're going to be little old ladies together."

She shook her head. "You won't age here. You'll come back, and I'll be long dead."

"Then I'll find a way for you to live here. Just shut up and trust me, Zoe!"

"I do." She blinked away her tears. "I do trust you."

When Grey Eyes and Líle left to take Zoe back to the human realm, I felt a mixture of relief and regret. Zoe had protested, but I needed to keep her safe.

The carriage moved out of sight, and I realised Drake was looking at me with his old eyes. For the first time, I understood a little of what he had done. He had sent me away to protect me, just as I was doing with Zoe. I nodded at him, and his mouth curved into a sad smile before he turned away.

Despite feeling as though a piece of me had been torn away, I was glad Zoe was gone so she wouldn't see what I might do next.

# Chapter 23

Scarlet was grumpy from being cooped up in the carriage all of the time, so when the weather calmed, I rode with her on Dubh for a while. She babbled excitedly, obviously immune to the despair pretty much everyone else felt in the Darkside. That morning, a group of soldiers had argued and ended up in a physical fight before Drake could stop them.

We were close to the Hollows. My stomach filled with acid at the thought of passing through there again. But maybe all would go well since Sadler was keeping his people with him.

Sorcha rode up beside me and gestured at Scarlet. "She doesn't seem affected by the atmosphere. Not like the others."

"I was here when I was pregnant. Maybe that made the difference."

Her eyes narrowed. "Perhaps. Are you going to give her to Sadler then?"

I gaped at her. "No! Why would I do that?"

"I thought you wanted to stop this war. Besides, you've been walking around looking as though you were about to lose everything you own. I simply assumed it was the child."

"He can't have her!"

Her eyes widened, then she smirked. "Of course. You would be attached to it."

" _She._ Not it. And she has a name. Maybe you should learn it, seeing as you're her stepmother now." I squeezed my heels against Dubh to speed him up.

"I'll be a mother myself soon enough," Sorcha called after me.

I pulled on the reins and turned to face her. "You can't."

"Excuse me? Are you telling me what I—"

"No, listen. The mirror. I saw your death in the mirror. You died giving birth."

She barked out a laugh. "Am I supposed to believe you're concerned about my health?"

"I don't give a shit about you. But I'm not completely heartless either." _At least, not yet._

I caught up to Brendan, eager to get away from Sorcha and the thoughts she had planted in my brain. I couldn't let myself think about her and Drake together.

Brendan had dismounted to stretch his legs. When he saw us, he bent down to pick a flower. He handed it to Scarlet, who promptly shoved it into her mouth.

"Brendan!" I pulled the plant from her hands and flung the goopy mess away. "That could have been poisonous."

"Do you really think I'd give the little butterfly poison to play with?"

"As if you'd think that far ahead when it comes to a child. Have you ever even seen a baby before?"

He snorted and grabbed his horse's reins to walk next to us. "I've seen everything there is to see. And I knew enough to keep a puny human like you alive, so stop doubting me, woman."

I couldn't help laughing, but I sobered quickly. The Hollows loomed ahead. "How are we playing this?" I asked. "Last time didn't go so well."

"We have gold and food if a tithe is required. But we keep hearing how Sadler won't let his people leave, so there may be nothing to worry about."

A crow suddenly darted in front of Dubh. He started to rear up, and Brendan quickly reached out and grabbed the reins to settle the horse. Dubh snorted, his ears twitching, as the crow landed in our path and stared at me.

"It's a messenger," Brendan said slowly. "Who uses crows nowadays?"

"A message for who?" I asked.

The bird flew up and over Dubh's head, dropping a roll of parchment practically in my lap. I picked it up, but Brendan snatched it from me. When he showed me the note, it contained two words: _Reynard_ and _Hollows_.

Brendan said waved Drake over. The carriages behind us slowly rolled to a stop as we conferred in the middle of the road.

"What's going on?" Vix asked as she approached with Rumble.

Brendan showed her the note. Her face paled. She swallowed hard, her fingers trembling.

When she looked at me, there was a new hardness in her gaze. "Let him come. I'll take care of him myself."

"We're trying to get people on our side," I said. "We can't just go in on attack. Let him make his move, and then we'll know where we stand. We're prepared. We're ready. We have trained soldiers. The upper hand is ours."

"We could send in a small group to scout around first," Drake said.

"I'd rather not split up," Brendan said.

"He's right," I said. "This place always divides us. We have to go in together and see what comes. Vix, Rumble, you two stay in Fiadh's carriage with Scarlet. I'll ride out on Dubh. If they see me, they might not target the carriages."

"No," Drake said. "You stay with Scarlet, too."

"I'm riding out," I insisted. "Now let's get this over and done with before everyone gets too spooked to think straight."

Soon, the procession through the Hollows began. The guards stayed alert near the carriages. Vix lay on top of Scarlet's carriage, armed with throwing daggers that Bran had gazed at with longing. Drake and Brendan rode on either side of me, Sorcha on the other side of Drake. Bran rode directly behind me, and more soldiers circled us constantly.

The silence was chilling as we reached the Hollow Hills. Drake cleared his throat as if to make some sound, but it didn't matter. The emptiness remained.

"Sorcha and I have been talking," he said abruptly. "Perhaps, when this is over, Scarlet could stay with us for a time, and—"

"Yeah, sure," I said. "Give me a call when hell freezes over."

He gave me a look of surprise. "I thought you'd be happy about this."

"Oh, fuck _off,"_ I snapped, picking up speed because the proximity was turning me into a monster. Sorcha knew exactly what she was doing, all right.

I sensed a shift in the air and slowed the horse again. I held up my hand. "Wait a second."

Brendan stopped beside me, looking all around. A crow flying over the woods beyond the Hollows cawed loudly. Amongst the trees, I spotted a flash of movement.

"There," I said, pointing. "Somebody's there."

Drake's bodyguard rode forward then shot an arrow toward the tree line. Others spread out toward the hiding places within the Hollows. As those soldiers shouted that the area was clear, a shock of white hair appeared from the woods.

"Reynard," I spat.

Reynard approached, a smirk dancing on his lips. He held up his hands. "Peace. We surrender."

"Show yourselves," Brendan commanded.

About two dozen faeries came into sight behind Reynard.

Drake ordered a group of soldiers to scout the woods for more Darksiders. They returned a few minutes later, declaring the place clear.

"We should kill them," Drake said. "All of them."

"They could be an asset," Brendan said.

"They attacked our scouts."

Reynard shook his head and made a _tsk_ ing noise. "So sorry about the dead scouts."

Did he really not know the scouts were alive, or had the water fae lied to us?

"Ask Rumble for his advice," I said, then before anyone could stop me, I rode toward Reynard. I needed to face him. I didn't care about the other faeries with him.

Reynard looked me up and down with a lazy smile. "And here's our queen, friends. Back from... wherever she ran off to." He nodded at the soldiers behind me. "Think they'll stop what's coming? You haven't got a clue how this world works."

"I know what's coming," I said. "And I'm on my way back to that little castle we call home."

"With Green and Silver cunts," he snarled.

"And Darksiders," Rumble said as he moved up to stand beside me.

Reynard looked momentarily startled before quickly recovering. "Of course _you're_ here." His smile widened. "Ah, and here's Vix, too. How are you, bitch? It's been a while. Did you miss me?"

Vix casually leaned against Dubh, but I could sense her tension. Reynard's faeries began to whisper amongst themselves.

Reynard ran his tongue across his teeth, his eyes darting in all directions. "We already surrendered. What else do you want?"

"They're the ones!" Jackie cried, running over to us. "They're his enforcers, the ones burning the homes and all that."

One of the faeries looked uncomfortable, maybe even a little ashamed. "We were following orders." He ran his hand over his bald head, making a face when Reynard glared at him.

I dismounted. "Destroying your own people is an odd tactic."

"Better dead than to live as a traitor," Reynard spat.

"A traitor?" I asked in mock surprise. "These Darksiders are escorting their queen and princess back home. That's more than you ever managed."

His face lit up. "Princess?"

"A little untainted princess," Vix said, tossing a knife into the air and catching it with ease. "Turns out pure things _can_ grow in the Darkside."

Reynard swallowed hard. "Well, we can escort you home, too." He gave the carriage behind me a longing look. "Part of the queen's guard, we'll be."

Brendan made a scoffing sound from somewhere behind us, but I nodded and said, "That's a good idea. We're outnumbered by the other courts. I think we can find a place for all of you. But you follow my orders from now on." I mounted Dubh and turned him back toward our carriage.

Reynard asked, "Or what?"

I glanced over my shoulder with a smile but didn't say a word.

We made it past the Hollows without further incident, except for a lone crow circling us on occasion.

"You can't trust Reynard," Vix hissed as we unpacked that evening.

"I know that."

"Then why is he here?"

"Because the others will follow him."

"The fools. He makes me sick, and I know he sends your skin crawling away from your flesh, too."

I turned to look at her. "You either trust me or you don't. Make a choice, Vix." I went to spend some time with my daughter before my head exploded.

On my way, I noticed Reynard and his men lounging about while everyone else worked. There might have been servants, but everyone, even the kings, helped out when it came time to set up camp. One of Reynard's men threw something at a passing soldier. Most of the others burst into laughter. The bald one watched everything in grim silence. His aqua-blue eyes were startling against his deep-toned skin. When Reynard tripped a servant who then crawled away in fear amidst the cruel teasing, I knew I had to do something.

I stalked over to the group. "This is when we work. Move, or you don't eat tonight. And if you pick on defenceless fae again, you'll have me to answer to."

Reynard grinned at me but didn't move. When I turned away, I heard him describe very loudly what he liked to do to bitchy upstarts. I decided to ignore him.

Bran touched my arm. "I can deal with them. Just tell me what you want them to do."

I smiled. "I want to give them enough rope is all."

He looked confused, so I linked my arm with his and added, "Just make sure only the ones who work get to eat."

I secretly spied on the group after that. The first to get up was the bald man. Most of the others laughed at him, but a tall slender woman and an overweight young male with a multi-coloured mohawk soon followed him. The bald man moved so close to me that Bran reached for his weapon.

I held my breath as the man passed, but as he did, he whispered, "The scouts still live."

After dinner, everyone clapped as Brendan ran around camp with Setanta on his shoulders and a giggling Scarlet tucked under his arm. Little Eithne chased him with a wooden sword, smacking the back of his knees whenever he slowed enough to let her. I was pretty sure the faery king was going through some kind of second childhood.

"They're kind of sweet, aren't they?" Bran said. "The little ones, I mean."

"Well, I think so."

"They sort of make you forget how miserable this place makes you feel."

I gave him a sharp glance, wondering if one child in particular was the cause. Scarlet hadn't shown any ill effects from being in the Darkside so far. Maybe I had been worrying for nothing.

Reynard sat by the wheel of a wagon, staring greedily at the children, at Scarlet. His hands ran up and down his thighs. The look in his eyes was a warning I took note of. Something had to be done about the Fox.

I lay awake long after everyone else had fallen asleep. I kept my eyes on the crow sitting in a nearby tree and watching Reynard's group. Then again, I could have been imagining it. Maybe sometimes, a bird was just a bird.

I had finally started to doze off when a cawing woke me. I sat up with a start to see the crow diving off its branch. I spotted Reynard's white hair moving amongst the trees. The rest of his group was asleep in a tent; I could hear them snoring from all the way across camp. I slipped out of my pallet. Bekind stirred and watched me with cat's eyes. I held my finger to my lips then moved on. I was still dressed in my black riding suit, with my fenris-scarred dagger in its scabbard.

I avoided the guards then slipped between the trees to follow the Fox. He mumbled to himself as he half-staggered through the woods.

During dinner, without food to sustain him, he had drunk himself into a stupor. As Bran got involved in the children's play, and Reynard's look grew more desperate, I had realised exactly what I was going to do about the Fox.

We crept farther into the forest, him humming an off-key melody. He pissed against a tree, fortunately with his back to me. I could easily draw blood with my dagger, could easily punish a man who was capable of terrible things. A man I had watched eye my daughter with a sick kind of glee in his stare. A man who had turned even Vix into a ball of nerves. He had done something to her, I was sure. Reynard had to go, and I had to be the one to do it. But I froze, and the moment passed.

I leaned against a tree and held my breath. I couldn't do it. No matter how much I hated him, I couldn't kill him like that, not in cold blood. And if I couldn't deal with Reynard, then what the hell was I going to do about Sadler?

I turned back toward camp, wondering where Reynard was headed. I crept from tree to tree, feeling unsettled. Then I felt a whoosh of air behind me, and I was suddenly pinned against Reynard, my back to his chest. His palm pressed against my mouth, partially covering my nose.

"There we go," he whispered. "We've been dancing too long. I'm a bloody warrior. Do you think a little girl is going to creep up on me? I led you far enough away from camp that nobody will hear you scream your lungs out." He took his hand from my mouth. "Now what are your orders? Want to try telling me what to do again? I think it's time you learned who's in charge here."

"Is that you? Pathetic little creep."

He tried to slam his hand over my mouth again. I twisted my head before he made contact and bit down hard on the meat of his palm.

He yanked his hand away, spun me around, and backed me against the tree, his knee between my legs. "A stupid little tart until the end."

His rancid breath blew into my face, making me recoil. He laughed and reached up with both hands to squeeze my breasts. He leaned forward and bit my neck, his shoulders shaking with unbridled glee.

I closed my eyes, not even feeling the pain anymore. He slobbered all over me as he ripped my top open, apparently not noticing that I wasn't fighting back. I surreptitiously unsheathed my dagger and held it behind my back.

"You should have killed me when I was with Brendan and no guards were around," I whispered. "Those arrows didn't even come close."

"What are you on about now? Blathering on like an idiot. Quiet, now."

"I warned you. Back in the Dark Court, I warned you not to fuck with me."

He grabbed a fistful of my hair and whacked my head against the tree. "I'll knock out your teeth if you don't shut your mouth. There, now we've both been warned. Shut the—"

I brought the dagger forward and slid the blade into his stomach. I was surprised by how easily it slipped through the skin and flesh. He was wearing a cloth shirt that gave him nothing in the way of protection. His eyes widened, and he made an odd sound. I pushed him away from me, but he didn't fall.

He gazed down at the wound in surprise, then his eyes moved to the bloody dagger in my hand. To my surprise, he threw back his head and laughed. "You'll need more than that to get rid of me."

His fist flew out and caught me in the side of the face, though I moved in time to deflect the full power of the blow. As he swung again, I ducked and made a run for it. In the moment, I lost my way and ran away from the camp. He couldn't catch me. I was too fast, and he was injured.

Still, he came, his throaty laughter filling the air. He enjoyed the hunt.

Once I had put some distance between us, I scurried up a tree and moved out onto a low branch. When Reynard came blustering through the undergrowth beneath me, I gripped the limb tightly then swung my body down, ripping the skin from my palms. I kicked him in the back of the head with both feet. He fell to his knees. I jumped down next to him. In my peripheral vision, I caught sight of a crow flying low around us.

Reynard rose to his knees, and I kicked him again. He grunted but managed to grab my foot and yank hard enough to pull me down to the ground. I struggled to free my foot. He moved his hands up my legs and past my waist. Clambering on top of me, he pinned my hands. Breathing heavily, he let go to wrap his hands around my neck. Hands freed, I found his wound and shoved my fingers inside, tearing the cut even more.

He howled and reared back with one fist. I rolled, knocking him off balance, and he hit the ground beside my head. I scrambled out from underneath him and unsheathed my dagger. Swearing, he leapt at me. I swiped my blade across his chest as I spun to the side to avoid his charge. He flew into a rage, calling me every name under the sun, as he tried to catch me.

I led him in a circle. He grew slower by the minute, and weaker, judging by his panting. The blood had spread across his shirt and was starting to drip down the front of his trousers.

"You're going to die, Fox," I taunted. "An insignificant human bested you. Remember that when you're stuck in the Fade. The likes of you should never find peace."

When he roared, I waggled my finger at him. "You said it yourself. We're too far from camp. They won't hear you shout for help. Or mercy."

He dove at me, throwing his entire weight on me and knocking me to the ground with him on top. He gripped my neck again, his desperation and anger giving him strength. Struggling for air, I shoved the dagger into the side of his neck. He gurgled, his fingers reaching for my eyes. I yanked the knife away, and his blood spurted. He fell to the side, and I scrambled out from under his legs. As he lay dying, I cut away a chunk of his bloodied white hair.

He was still alive when I walked away, but he wouldn't last much longer. I had heard the slick, wet sounds of death approaching. I returned to camp, bloody and trembling, and went straight to Reynard's tent.

I found the bald man's pallet and straddled him, the dagger and the clump of hair in my hands. He woke up. In his eyes, I saw confusion give way to realisation, which was then replaced with a mixture of fear and respect.

I laid the hair on his chest. "He didn't obey me," I whispered. "Make sure I don't have to deal with any of you personally again."

"I follow orders," he replied. "And I despised the Fox. I'm yours now."

"No. You belong to the princess. But until she's old enough, I speak for her. Darksiders are going to stand alongside the Green and Silver soldiers. Fae like Reynard have no place there."

He nodded, still looking as though he couldn't quite believe his eyes. Exhausted, I left him and went to wash in the nearby spring. I was scrubbing at the blood, so I barely noticed Rumble approach.

"I would have done it," he said.

"Sometimes, it has to be me."

"It's a hard choice."

"It's not the first time I've had blood on my hands." I thought of the mirror again. "And it won't be the last." A crow cawed then flew away.

"In times of war, nobody's hands remain unbloodied."

I let out a sob as the blood stained the water with streaks of red.

# Chapter 24

I avoided holding Scarlet the next morning. I let Anya take care of her because I didn't want to taint her with my murderous hands. I sat alone and avoided looking anyone in the eye. I had gone after Reynard with the intention of confronting him, of causing him harm. I had allowed the darkness to take over and let myself become the person I was sure I had to be to survive. Bekind came over and mewled when she saw my face. She shifted into her human form and gingerly touched my cheek. I flinched a little.

"You're bruised," she said. "Why did you risk yourself?"

"I know what I'm doing."

"Do you?"

My shoulders sagged. "I'm okay, and I've shown those ignorant arsehole Darksiders what I'm capable of. They still think of me as just a human, Bekind. I have to prove myself." And I had to prove _to_ myself that I didn't need to be rescued.

"Where does it end?"

_With Sadler._ I gave her a weak smile. "If I'm going to pretend to be a faery queen, then I have to act like one some of the time."

She snorted. "As if a faery queen does her own dirty work."

"A powerless one does."

She considered that. "Next time, let me help you."

"Of course," I lied. "Now get ready. We've a long day ahead of us."

I knew she wasn't satisfied, but she left it alone. I walked around camp to make sure Reynard's faeries didn't cause any problems, but all of them were working hard. Most of them laboured sullenly, but at least they were on their feet. The bald one had taken charge. He wore Reynard's hair around his neck like a trophy. I thought that was weird but decided not to comment. Mohawk nodded at me when he passed then seemed to have second thoughts and executed a half-bow.

The sole female of the group approached me, keeping her eyes downcast. "Donncha wanted me to let you know that we're all available if you need anything."

"Donncha?"

"The captain. He's... um... replaced the old captain."

"What's your name?"

"Orlaith. I'm Donncha's second-in-command." She caught my eye. "If you don't have any objections," she added hurriedly.

"You're not one of Deorad's," I said, noting her fair hair.

"No. Sadler recruited us after the queens fell and the courts disintegrated."

"Any grudges against anyone here?"

"We're Darksiders now. Others are the ones with grudges."

"Fair enough." I gestured at the rest of her group. "Anyone need watching, Orlaith?"

"Donncha will deal with them," she said, sounding confident.

"What's the one with the mohawk called?"

"The boy?" She screwed up her nose. "That's just Oisín. He's nobody."

"No such thing as nobody." When she looked confused, I waved my hand. "Carry on. Looks like you'll all earn dinner tonight."

She gave me a fleeting smile before heading back.

Vix came over next. "Did he suffer?" she asked.

I refused to look at her. "Yes."

"Good."

And that was it.

"Riding again?" Brendan asked as he kept pace with Dubh.

"Yep." I didn't explain why I was avoiding my own child.

He pointed at my cheek. "That looks nasty. What happened?"

"Hit a branch in the dark. Stupid, eh?"

He frowned. "Have Bran take a lamp next time."

"I'd like a couple moments of privacy every now and then."

He smiled then looked behind us at where Donncha and the rest of the latest additions were marching. "They look uneasy today." He put a hand above his eyes to shield them from the sun. "Wait. Where's Reynard?"

"Gone."

He studied me for a moment. "One of Drake's?"

I kept my eyes straight ahead. "Nope."

"Ah." He relaxed. "A Darksider then."

"Yes," I said. "A Darksider dealt with him."

"Are you all right? You seem... uptight today."

"I'm a little nervous. We're getting close now."

Once we left the Hollows, we stayed near the River Garbh in case the water fae kept their word and brought us messages. The more time that passed, the less assured I felt of their loyalty.

He glanced at me. "We need to be prepared that this might not go as we planned. Are you sure you can handle that?"

"What's the worst-case scenario?"

"Everyone dies," he said dryly.

"Shut up."

"This won't be bloodless. Nothing ever is. We're not even sure we can affect the situation at all. I just want you to be ready to run if it comes to that."

"You won't run."

He grinned. "I wasn't talking about me, was I?"

I tried on a smile for size. "We're slowly stealing all of Sadler's subjects. What could possibly go wrong?"

Brendan launched into some anecdotes from his past.

"You were such an arse," I said after one tale, trying not to laugh. "How did anyone put up with you?"

"I was very charming. And, you know, royal."

"Oh, yeah. There's that. Pity it doesn't work anymore. Royals are dropping like flies."

He winced. "Let's hope we're not flies."

"I'm not royal."

"Like it or not, you're royal now. A king married you. Nobody will care about the circumstances after a time."

"What if I just went home again?"

He looked away. "Don't."

"Would anyone try and stop me?"

"No. But I don't want you to."

"Why?"

He glanced at me, a frown creasing the scar across his forehead. "Friends make this life bearable. Kings tend to be short on friends."

"You told me before that you would forget me."

"I don't remember saying that."

"Maybe it wasn't those exact words, but—"

"You were gone for over a year. Did I forget you?"

"You needed me."

His lips twitched. "Did I?"

"You needed the things Sadler wanted. He wants the things you need. It's a self-perpetuating, never-ending circle of madness."

"Are you angry with me?"

I sighed. "It's hard to be angry with you."

"You sound disappointed."

"It's kind of a pain."

The troop was quieter than usual. Jackie and his boys were hanging from one carriage. Bekind and Vix were atop Scarlet's carriage, the two of them sharing space in an uneasy silence. Rumble, Dymphna, and Conn rode alongside, and inside, the children were being taken care of by Fiadh and Anya.

I was trying desperately hard not to think about Zoe. I knew the Miacha would do what was best for her, but she had been gone hardly any time at all when I had succumbed to the anger inside me. I worried about my future actions without her human influence.

"I was lonely when you were gone," Brendan said abruptly.

I looked at him in surprise. There was no humour in his expression. I tried to laugh, but it came out unhappy. "Me, too."

"So was Drake."

"Stop it."

"He's changed."

"Every one of us has changed," I said. "Nothing ever stays the same."

"Is that such a bad thing?"

"You're the one saying it like it's the end of the world."

"Maybe I am." He sighed again, heavier. "He's angry with me. He blames me, I think. Whenever I'm near Scarlet, I feel his eyes boring into my back."

"Is that why you give her the time of day?" I demanded. "To piss off Drake?"

"No, I do it to impress you," he said with a grin.

"You're so full of it." But I smiled back. "And Sorcha informed me that she'll be a mother before long, so I doubt he'll care if you make friends with Scarlet."

"Did she?" He looked thoughtful. "And what did you say?"

"I told her how she dies. She laughed it off."

"Banshees aren't afraid of death. It's the ultimate gift, after all."

"The mirror showed her dying in childbirth."

"That's... unfortunate. Perhaps the mirror shows possibilities. Or maybe it's there to confuse and provoke. You should have smashed it when you had the chance."

"Maybe." Silently, I disagreed.

"He really did love you, Cara," he said softly. "He went a little demented when you were taken by Sadler."

"He didn't show it."

"A leader can't show weakness. It's the first step to ruin. You know that. I _know_ you understand that. But you encourage the anger. Why?"

"It's better than falling apart, Brendan." I took a deep breath. He was hitting too close to a nerve.

"Do you love him?"

"He's married to the banshee. We barely talk, never mind anything else. When we do speak, it ends in a shouting match half the time."

"That's not an answer."

"I don't have an answer." I urged Dubh to move a little faster, but Brendan kept up with us.

"I'm sorry we let it happen," he said. "I'm sorry about what you went through, but don't let it kill everything that makes you... _you_."

"What are you even talking about?"

"You're becoming more like us."

"And you're starting to sound like Drake."

"No, listen to me. Just this once, _listen_." He had never sounded so earnest. "This is a place of magic, Cara, and magic can manifest itself in ways you would never expect."

"Seriously. I'm not following you."

He looked exasperated. "I can't feel you anymore. The only time I feel anything from you is when you're with Scarlet. Maybe that's why I spend time with her. It's the only time Cara is present."

"You're being—"

"Let me talk. For once, let me say what I have to say without argument. You're burying everything you're feeling. I know you are. I should feel your anger and hurt and pain and everything else that you have to be feeling after what you went through. You just sent your best friend away, and you've barely shown a reaction since the night she had the seizure. You should be a font of emotion right now. But you're cold. You're acting like one of us, but you're not. You're human in all of the best ways, and if you keep shovelling those feelings down, they'll burst out of you in other ways. This is the world where nothing makes sense, and you're playing a dangerous game."

"I'm not playing a game," I said softly, "unless you mean that game where I do whatever it takes to survive just one more day. Because I'm getting pretty good at that one, and you're the one who encourages me to do it."

"Let me in sometimes," he said. "That's all I'm asking. Let somebody in and let those feelings go somewhere. Don't let them fester inside you like that taint in your veins. I'm afraid for you."

"I thought faeries don't have feelings," I said harshly.

"Turns out we do. We just need them coaxed out of us sometimes. And then there's nowhere for them to go when the people who do the coaxing box themselves away."

"You actually sound serious."

"That's because I am." He looked me dead in the eye and went in for the kill. "Don't you miss Zoe?"

"I'm trying not to think about her. If I start thinking of her, then I'll start thinking of my grandparents and home, and I won't be able to do what I have to do here."

"And what's that?"

I looked away. "Whatever it takes."

"A Darksider." He reached out and grazed my cheek with his fingers. "You."

I dug my heels in and urged Dubh forward.

"You don't have to be alone" were the barely audible words Brendan uttered in my wake.

Deeper into the forest, the air thickened with tension. There had been some kind of argument between Oisín and the bulky sullen-eyed faery with razor-sharp fingernails. The divide between the different groups of soldiers had widened, and it seemed as though everyone but Jackie was in a terrible mood. When we stopped to eat, I caught Drake staring at Scarlet a number of times. Maybe I was imagining the look to be calculated, but it sent a chill down my spine.

When we set off again, I rode next to Brendan. He had been right about me. I was trying to block everything out. It wasn't meant to be permanent, just something to keep me going for a while.

"I'm sorry," I said after a while.

"You've nothing to be sorry for," he said.

"I am mad at you," I admitted. "I'm kind of mad at everyone in some way. But I'm glad to be here, too. I'm not trying to ignore everything I feel. I'm just sticking a pin in it until I've time to process. Okay?"

"You always were the smart one," he said with a grin.

That night, when we set up camp, the crow returned. Or rather, _a_ crow showed up. I didn't know if it was the same one. Still, it set me on edge.

"I have a bad feeling," I told Rumble. "Stay close to Scarlet. I'm going to see if the scouts are back yet."

Rumble nodded. Out of everyone, I trusted him the most with Scarlet. He wouldn't try to save me instead of her. That was oddly reassuring.

I found Brendan rubbing down his horse.

"Hey," I said. "This might sound strange, but there's a crow hanging around. Shit seems to follow that bird, so I'm a little worried."

"You think it's the same bird?" he asked, looking amused.

"I'm thinking that there are no coincidences. Have the scouts gotten back yet? Is it safe here?"

He frowned. "They're not back. They should be. I'll—"

The crow began to caw loudly, startling everyone in camp.

Brendan glanced up. "That's one loud bird."

The noise of a horn filled the air. Immediately, the distinct sound of clashing swords echoed around the clearing.

"Ambush!" somebody yelled.

Soldiers moved into action as one.

"Run," Brendan said.

I sprinted toward where I knew Scarlet was, but the sullen Darksider got in my way, a knife gleaming in his hand. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Rumble and Vix amongst the soldiers guarding my daughter. The Darksider raised his arm and brought the knife down. Brendan came out of nowhere and caught the blade with his bare hand. Blood dripped between his fingers as he forced the weapon away from me.

I heard a wet sucking sound. The Darksider fell forward with a sword sticking through his gut.

With a look of disgust, Donncha pulled his sword out of the man's body and wiped it clean on the grass. "Apologies," he said. "I was too slow."

"What's happening?" Brendan demanded, flinging the Darksider's weapon away.

"The edges of camp were attacked. This one took advantage of the distraction." Donncha kicked the body. "I request only that the others aren't punished for our mistakes."

"You did good," I said. "I need to get to Scarlet."

"She's safe," Donncha said. "The rest of the Darksiders are watching over her, even the little ones who aren't warriors."

He was right. Jackie and his lads had surrounded the carriage, looking as fierce as they could despite being pretty diminutive next to the warriors.

The fighting was over almost as soon as it started.

"A desperate act," Donncha said. "I'll have my people clear the area, with your permission."

"Go with mine," Brendan said. "Double up in case there are more attackers out there."

Donncha looked at me for confirmation then left. A strange _pit-pat_ sound made me look down. The blood from Brendan's wound formed a tiny puddle on the leaves between us.

"Oh, your poor hand! What were you thinking?" I inspected his wound. It looked nasty.

"I was thinking, 'Brendan, today is the day to be a hero.' Was I wrong? Damn."

I laughed. "You're ridiculous. Come on. Fiadh has a rockin' first aid kit that Grey Eyes left behind."

"Do you call her Grey Eyes to her face?" He let me lead him to the carriages, making smart remarks all the way.

"Pathetic," Vix said when we reached the carriage. "I didn't even get to hit one person."

"Terrible," I said. "What's the world coming to? Is Scarlet okay?"

"Relax. Nothing came near us."

I leaned into the carriage. "They're just checking the area. Maybe stay inside until we know for sure it's clear, okay?"

Fiadh nodded. "I don't have a problem with that."

"I need some bandages and maybe that ointment for infections. Brendan's hand was hurt."

She pulled a basket out from under her seat and took out a package. "This should have everything you need. Can I help?"

"We'll be fine," I said. I smiled at my daughter. "She slept through it all?"

Fiadh nodded.

Conn opened the door. "We're clear," he said. "A bunch of bandits who overestimated themselves. We've kept some as prisoners. I'll question them later."

I took the medicine and went back to Brendan. Bran had already left some clean water.

Brendan looked uncertainly at the ointment. "Are you sure all of this is necessary?"

"Don't be such a baby." I bathed the cut and laughed at him when he winced. I reminded him of the time he and Drake had cut open my festered wound. "You don't want that to happen to you, trust me," I said. "So let me clean it properly."

"Yes, my lady."

"Don't torment the person who's this close to stinging the hell out of you."

The camp bustled around us, returning to normal pretty quickly. Weirdly, the tension that had been so prevalent seemed to lift. Defending camp together had somewhat united the different groups.

When I finished bandaging Brendan's hand, I held it in mine a bit longer than necessary. "No more being a hero, okay?"

"But it makes me look so good."

I took his good hand and squeezed, letting a little of what I had felt when he grabbed the blade slip through. I had been horrified and scared for him, and I allowed some of that to escape. A small gasp escaped his lips.

"No more," I said meaningfully, and then I left to spend time with my daughter.

# Chapter 25

For two days, we saw nobody outside of our group, and although it was clear people were apprehensive about what was to come, the different courts mixed together more often, even going so far as to play sports together. Late in the evening, when the meals and work were done, Donncha led the Darksiders in a hurling match against members of the Green Court.

Brendan bemoaned the fact that he couldn't play with his own team, and we both sat together to watch the somewhat friendly match. I winced as Jackie smacked one of his own sons across the back of the legs with an oversized hurley stick.

Jackie called to Brendan, "I can't believe your people brought hurls and sliotars with them to a war. What are ye like?"

Brendan grinned. "We knew there would be downtime. Can't go on a long trip without some entertainment. And if you don't consider either of those a weapon, then you haven't been to the right matches."

Oisín stopped a speeding sliotar with his forehead and fell to the ground.

"Oh, my God!" I cried. "Why are they doing this to themselves?"

Brendan leaned back against a giant tree. "They need to let off steam. Let them be. He's fine." He pointed. "Look He's up on his feet again."

I peeked through my fingers and saw Donncha ruffle Oisín's mohawk. "Lunatics, the lot of them. Why aren't any of Drake's people joining in?"

"He's paranoid about another attack. He's making them double up and take extra runs around camp. They'll be exhausted by the time we reach Sadler's castle."

"They're not the only ones. This dead heat is killing me. What the hell did you and Drake do anyway?"

"Stopped the rain," he said. "Maybe we did too good of a job. But it's better than thunderstorms and torrential rain."

"I could do with a little breeze."

He fanned me with his injured hand until I shoved him.

"Ha," he said. "We're winning." He sighed. "It's such a beautiful, violent game. I'm pretty sure a faery came up with it just to see humans get bloody."

I snorted. "Always taking credit for everything."

"Come closer," he said. "I'm wounded and need comfort."

I kept my eyes on the game. "He says to the only girl in the vicinity."

"That's not the only reason. Were you really so worried about me?"

"Don't push your luck!" I edged away from him. "I should go check on Scarlet."

"Don't go yet."

"Why?"

He smiled. "I'll think of a reason later."

"You're in one of your silly moods. It makes me uncomfortable."

"I sincerely apologise for being happy to be in your company."

"The sickly sweet thing doesn't suit you, Brendan."

"I can try the hero thing again."

"That's it. I'm going." I walked away, smiling as I heard his infectious laughter.

On the way, I saw Jackie limping toward the fire.

"Finished?" I asked.

"I've got a stitch, and I'm tired. I'm an old man, and..." He looked around and shrugged. "And I keep hearing things."

"Like, voices in your head?"

"No, woman. Like signals I haven't heard in a long time. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to smoke a pipe in peace."

"Wait. What kind of signals?"

"Jaysus," he said. "There's no peace in this place. Come on then. We'll investigate."

"Okay," I said, walking next to him. "But what exactly are we investigating?"

"The sounds. The signals. We have scouts, do we not?"

"Extra since the last attack."

He scoffed, "Attack, indeed. A suicide mission that was. And are you going to leave them in chains for eternity or what?"

"Sport makes you mouthy. I'd rather let them go, but they could have killed somebody."

"Have you seen them?" he asked. "I bet you haven't. They're a bunch of boys, so they are."

"Show me."

He shook his head. "No peace at all. The Silver ones are keeping guard. That big lad, what's his name? Oh, yeah, Conn. That one. They wouldn't let him near them. King's orders, they said. I heard him tell that lady all about it."

"Why didn't they tell me?"

"Nobody wants to worry you. You look sad so much that nobody wants to ruin the good mood you've been in the last few days."

That startled me. "Right then. Let's get Conn to come with us."

I steered him back toward the carriages where the others were relaxing. Conn and Fiadh were playing with the children while Vix and Rumble strolled around them. Bran sat apart, looking subdued.

"I'm going to see the attackers," I said. "If anyone wants to join me, come now."

Conn and Bran volunteered immediately.

"Pah," Vix said. "Put them all to death. Who cares for talking?"

"I'll stay with the child," Rumble said.

"Fine," I said. "Let's go."

Bran and Conn walked on either side of me as we followed Jackie. The old man put a finger to his lips as we neared the edge of camp. He pointed toward a thicket of trees and signalled for us to follow him. I could clearly hear the voices of a couple of soldiers joking together, but there wasn't a sound from the prisoners.

We entered a small clearing. Seven faeries were chained together, all of them bruised and beaten. They looked exhausted and half-starved.

"What's going on here?" I asked Drake's men.

"We're guarding the prisoners," one of them said. "In case they try to escape."

"They're not in any condition to escape," I snapped. "Get them food and water. Now."

"We were told to—"

"I said now!"

He looked at his companion and shrugged. Both of them left.

I peered at the dishevelled prisoners. "They're not soldiers."

"Farmers, maybe," Bran said.

"One of the tribes," Jackie said. "Starved and beaten into submission. Oh, a fine lot the king's men are."

I looked at Conn. "These are the big, bad attackers?"

He glanced away. "They seem an unlikely band of criminals."

One of the men raised his head, looked at us, and shrank away as if in terror.

"Oh, for heaven's sake." I knelt beside him. "Are you okay?"

He looked from one of us to the other and nodded. The soldiers came back with water, food, and a pair of kings.

I glared at them. "Don't just stand there. Give them the water. Feed them!"

The soldiers looked to Drake. He nodded, and they set to work. I moved out of their way and approached the kings.

"What the hell is this?" I asked. "They're not soldiers. They're not any kind of a threat."

"They did attack the camp," Brendan said uncertainly. "I was under the impression they were greater in number, and warriors besides." He turned to Drake. "You exaggerated a tad."

"They're the enemy," Drake snapped. "We can't be seen to show weakness."

"This isn't strength. It's cruelty," I said. "Jackie said they're probably tribesmen or something. So they were like him and his sons—on the run, in hiding, half-starved. How is keeping them chained up like this okay?"

"Cara," Drake said, "they attacked us. We can't take in every stray with a vendetta."

"A vendetta? Look at them. If they didn't hate us before, they do now."

"They came to our camp armed and attacked first," Drake insisted. "We were lucky they didn't know much more than how to conceal themselves."

I looked at Brendan. "Talk to him, would you?"

Brendan gave a sheepish shrug. "She does have a point."

"Enough of this," Drake barked. "Stop indulging her to earn her favour."

"Does it worry you?" Brendan asked smartly.

"You're letting her manipulate you. She'll get away with anything as long as she—"

"Think carefully on what you say," Brendan said in a low, dangerous voice.

Drake's jaw twitched. They faced off, both of them angry, probably partly because of the atmosphere in the Darkside.

I got between them. "Stop it, both of you. This is stupid."

"He insults me," Brendan said in a tone I didn't recognise. "He thinks to tell me what to do."

Drake sneered. "That's exactly what she asked you to do to me."

Brendan's hand moved to his sword.

"Brendan, stop!" I pressed both hands against his chest. "Stop it!"

"Is this what it comes down to?" he asked harshly. "Two against one?"

I folded my arms. "Well, if the two of you try to gang up on me, I'll just do what I want anyway. Fair warning."

His mouth twitched, and he gave Drake a smile that bordered on apologetic. "She appears to think we don't already know this."

"Humans," Drake said.

Brendan stepped around me and took Drake's hand. They exchanged a bemused look. I stifled my sigh of relief. The last thing we needed was for Green and Silver to go at each other's throats.

A bird call sounded, and Jackie cocked his head to the side.

"Was that the signal you've been hearing?" I asked.

Jackie spun around in a circle. "I think somebody is looking for these boys."

"More attackers?" Drake stiffened. "Are we in danger?"

"No more than these poor critters," Jackie said.

He cupped his hands to his mouth and made a long, soft sound. An answering call came almost immediately.

"There we go." He moved to the edge of the clearing.

I followed him. When we neared the brush, a familiar face appeared between the branches of a tree.

"You!" we both said as one.

An old man with incredibly pointed teeth dropped from the tree. He was the leader of a tribe, a man I had saved from death in the Dark Court. "You again," he said.

"And you." I grinned then regretted it when he returned the favour. "I'm Cara."

"We all know your name," he said. "They call me Bas."

Drake approached with his sword drawn, but he lowered it when he recognised the man. "You gave us hospitality once."

"And this one repaid it with my life," Bas said, gesturing at me. "So I'm surprised to see her taking prisoners."

"Not her," Jackie said indignantly.

Bas looked at Jackie with a curious expression. "You're a Darksider."

"Standing by my queen, I am," Jackie replied proudly.

"They burn your home?"

"Reynard," Jackie said. "But he's gone, and his men belong to her now."

Bas looked at me and sucked his teeth. "You shouldn't be here. It's too dangerous. Many are trapped at the castle with no way out. More are in hiding or on the run, attacking anything they run into in their desperation. What did these boys do?"

"Saw Reynard's man," the only conscious one said. "He burned us out of our village. We thought we could... we made a mistake."

"It's a nasty time," Bas said. "Scared folks. Never thought things could get worse, but it looks that way."

"What are you doing?" Brendan asked. "How many are with you? Where are you heading?"

"Mostly, we're running from Reynard's gang and struggling to eat. Living in fear and spreading rumours about what's coming. Mebbe two dozen of us left."

"You don't have to worry about Reynard any longer," Brendan said.

"As much as I appreciate that, I still have to ask. Why are you here of all places?" Bas nodded at me. "Last we heard, you were running from this place."

"It was time for me to come home," I said softly. "We're going to stop Sadler. You might be safer with us."

"We don't have the rations—" Drake began.

"Our hunters have been successful," Brendan said. "Food won't be a concern for a time."

"You're making a stand?" the old man asked thoughtfully. "Queen against king. Those odds aren't great."

I shook my head. "Queen and Darksider heir plus friends against mad king. Odds improve."

He smiled again. "I'll bring it to my people. It'll be up to them, but I'm willing to stand by your side. I'm too old for running anyway."

A soldier sprinted into the clearing, panting as she struggled to spit out what she had to say. "Water fae," she gasped. "A message came from the water fae in the river."

"What's the message?" Drake demanded.

"The ships are on the horizon. At least three dozen can be seen so far. Probably more to follow. The water fae are worried. They said something about a death fog? They said to tell the queen if she doesn't leave soon, there won't be any time left for her to escape."

"How long do we have until they land?" Brendan asked.

"A week, if we're lucky," she said. "Outsiders will be here within the week. And if they get here..."

She didn't need to finish the sentence. We were all dead if those ships landed. There was no other possible outcome.

I insisted the chief and his people join me, and they hadn't protested. They seemed too bewildered to argue about anything. I wasn't sure if they had lost their wits because of fear or hunger, but it didn't matter. They were Darksiders, and I had to be their queen if I wanted to beat Sadler at anything. I was just as desperate as everyone else.

The atmosphere in camp had shifted again. Word had quickly spread about the water fae's message, and some of the soldiers were angry that the prisoners were being protected by me. I took Jackie, Bas, Vix, Rumble, and Donncha into Fiadh's carriage to discuss the situation.

"I haven't been completely honest with all of you," I admitted.

Vix bristled. "And that means what exactly?"

"When Brendan asked me to come here, he had a plan. But I soon realised that everyone here has a different agenda," I explained. "Brendan wants to find a way to end this war peacefully, but I'm pretty sure the only method that will work is to kill Sadler. His death the only way to break the deal he's made, and it seems like it's too late to avoid that. Drake wants me to meet with Sadler, except he wants to send an assassin with me."

"And you?" Jackie asked. "What's your plan?"

"I... I want to deal with Sadler myself." The ensuing silence made me shiver. "Think about it. If someone from the Green or Silver courts kills Sadler, the Darksiders at the castle will feel obliged to fight back. They'll have no leader, and they'll be facing off against two other courts."

"They wouldn't stand a chance," Rumble said.

"Exactly. Even if Drake gets his way and the Darksiders _don't_ fight back, it'll still end badly. If Drake wins, he and Brendan will divide up the land. But Drake wants to eliminate the Darksiders, just in case. Brendan just wants his realm back. Even if he manages to stop Drake from destroying the Darksiders, everyone will have to be a part of the Green or Silver courts, the very places that rejected them in the first place."

Vix nodded. "Most Darksiders would rather die."

"But some would be willing to leave the Darkside behind," Conn said.

"Do you really think either king is going to take Darksider refugees into their nice clean land?" I asked. "They think the very presence of Darksiders is making the taint move in their direction." I looked around at each of them. "But if _I_ deal with Sadler, the kings will owe me. I can persuade them to do the right thing."

"We need a Darksider to rule us," Fiadh said softly. "That's all we need. And we have an heir."

I didn't want to think that far ahead. "I just wanted you all to know the real story. If you want to turn back now, go ahead. But if you come with me, you'll have to choose a side."

"Sadler is mad," Bas said. "Who cares if he dies?"

"Plenty of fae are still loyal to him." Donncha faced me and bowed his head. "But I'll stand with you if you think you can save us."

"I'm loyal to the Darkside," Rumble said. "It's my home, _our_ home. Sadler is trying to burn it to the ground. He's not himself anymore. He's under a dark influence, one that is intent on destroying us."

"It would be different if we weren't all starving to death anyway," Jackie said. "Look at my boy, weak as a lamb. Sadler called his madness upon us. I say we go with the lady and see what happens."

Murmurs of agreement rose from the small gathering.

"And if I kill him?" I asked. "Or if I don't succeed?"

Nobody replied.

I sat up late and watched Scarlet sleep. If I was wrong, she was in danger. I was gambling with our lives, and I could easily fail.

"Stop punishing yourself," Brendan said from behind me.

I almost jumped out of my skin. "Don't sneak up on me," I said, pressing my hand against my chest.

"I called your name. Twice. Don't obsess about the things you can't change. We make our own futures, remember?"

"So people keep saying. I'm not obsessing. I'm just thinking things through."

"Stop thinking. Relax." He held out his hand. "Come with me."

"Hell, no."

"Humour me. I have a gift for you."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "I don't believe you."

"Okay, it's a gift for me that I'm willing to share." He smiled. "Do you not trust me?"

"I should never trust you." I looked down at Scarlet, reluctant to leave her.

"Here. We'll just sit in the carriage. You'll see her from the window. You go ahead, and I'll be right back."

Shaking my head, I got up and moved toward the carriage. I waited for him outside the door.

He returned a minute later, holding something behind his back. "Get in and close your eyes," he scolded.

I obeyed because I was dying of curiosity. When he let me open my eyes, he was holding a goblet of a golden-coloured liquid.

"A drink?" I asked sceptically.

"This is the good stuff," he said in a conspiratorial tone. "The kind of stuff that needs no more than a sip. We'll reach the castle in two days. Most of us won't sleep tomorrow night. So why not relax tonight?"

"If this makes me loony..."

"It won't. It's just a taste. I'll take care of you."

"Yeah, that's what I'm worried about."

"Then don't drink it. More for me."

I rolled my eyes as he took a sip and made an exaggerated sound of pleasure. I accepted the goblet and took a tiny sip. The flavour spread across my tongue with a delicious warmth.

I sighed heavily. "I drank an entire cup the first time."

"And went back for seconds," he said. "I've heard that story."

"It's the best thing I've ever tasted."

"I'm sorry for you," he said, laughing.

"Don't ruin my buzz." I looked out the window at my daughter curled up next to a black cat. People who pledged their lives to protect her slept all around her, and yet she would never be safe. "Am I making a mistake?" I said, thinking aloud. "Am I just risking her life for nothing?"

"Of any of us, she's the safest from harm. Sadler won't risk her life. He needs her, remember?"

"What if she ends up trapped with him and all of us dead?"

"If she's anything like her mother, she'll find a way to escape."

"I hope she's nothing like me. I hope she grows up happy and independent but still capable of love and everything that goes with it. Mostly, I want her to be happy."

"I've seen you happy and independent and capable of love."

"I put on a good show."

"Is this the wine talking?"

I shook my head. The buzz had already died. "This is Cara talking. That's what you wanted, isn't it?"

He dumped the remainder of the wine out the window and set the cup on a bench. "It is. So what does Cara have to say?"

"Nothing important."

"I can listen to the non-important things just as well."

I smiled. "Mr. Reliable."

He saluted me. "If that's what you need."

"I'm scared," I said in a small voice. "I used to be a risk-taker. I used to have no fear. Then Scarlet came along, and all of a sudden, I'm terrified I'll die and leave her alone. I'm scared that I'll have to watch everyone die, that the things I do to avoid their deaths will be the very things that cause them. And there haven't been any white flowers in the Darkside."

"What?"

"Brighid's flowers. Maybe I'm being superstitious, but they haven't been leading our way, and that's freaking me out. When there's a flower, I always end up where I'm supposed to be."

"What if _you're_ Brighid's flower?" He looked embarrassed.

"That's the cheesiest thing I've ever heard."

"It sounded better in my head, I promise. But seriously, what if you're supposed to lead the way? Your luck or whatever it is that keeps you alive. What if that's how we win against Sadler and his army of dead things?" He shuddered. "We should stay out of it and let the gods sort it out between themselves."

"I wish it was that simple," I said, but his suggestion had me thinking.

"I'm not worried," he said. "You've already done something amazing. You've joined two courts with their sworn enemies, turned men against their own king. I think you really must be a kind of witch. Imagine the power your daughter will have."

"Will she have power? I mean, she's human."

"Will she?" He raised his eyebrows, and I knew for certain that he had seen Scarlet's tricks. "Besides, anyone can earn themselves some power. Why not her? She's already seen as special—the one untainted being in a chaotic realm. And with you as a mother, what could go wrong?"

I leaned back against the seat. "As much as I love these ego boosts, the truth couldn't hurt."

He turned to me. "Do you still think so little of yourself? Do you really think you've accomplished nothing? You entered the Fade and returned in one piece, even after the fenris attacked you. You passed through the Hauntings twice, were shot with arrows twice. You survived the curse of the summer wife, being married to Sadler, and living as a prisoner on the Darkside. You made it through the Black Marshes with your eyes closed. A _king_ cursed you with your true name, and you still overcame it."

"Well, when you say it like that, it sounds cool, but the truth is really—"

"Pah!" He flapped his hand at me. "If you can't see how amazing you are, then it's your problem."

I laughed at him. "I can't tell if this is an intervention or a chat-up line."

He held out his hands in mock impatience. _"Why_ must you label every little thing?"

He reached for me. I moved out of his reach.

"Every time," he said softly. "Every single time."

"What?"

"Why is that you close off whenever you let me see the real you? The closer we become, the more you turn from me. It's one step forward and four steps back. Before I was sent back to the Fade, you slept next to me, and you kissed me willingly. Now, after everything, you can't even bear my touch."

"That's not..."

Something in his eyes made me feel guilty, and his words just reminded me of Zoe's warnings. I remembered how close we had been before, and I knew why I was distancing myself from him.

His gaze softened. "If I die on this adventure, I want you to understand that—"

I moved closer to him and clasped his face in my hands. "Brendan, shut up." I peered into his eyes. "And don't die."

"I... will try my very best not to die," he said solemnly.

"Good."

Neither of us moved. I wasn't sure what I was doing. Being around Brendan made me feel good, but jumping into things because of the threat of death hanging over our heads never worked out for me. I wasn't sure that being lonely was a good enough reason either. But when he glanced down at my mouth, my stomach did a flip, and every nerve ending in my body flared to life. I was attracted to him, I couldn't deny that, but was it enough to risk ruining a friendship?

"You haven't said anything in a really long time," he said.

"I'm thinking."

"Please stop thinking," he whispered.

I ran my fingers across his scar and down his cheek. I had made so many mistakes. What was one more? But still, I hesitated.

Brendan moved to kneel in front of me. His large hands squeezed my thighs, then with one swift movement, we were chest to chest, and his lips were on mine. I forgot to worry, forgot to separate, forgot everything but the way my heart hammered in my chest as my body automatically coiled around him. I grew desperate to truly live for just a moment. I was already breathless when he pulled away, leaving me wanting.

"It shouldn't be this hard of a decision," he said, and then he was gone.

# Chapter 26

The castle was in sight. I swallowed hard as the memories of being trapped there engulfed me. I held Scarlet that much tighter when I thought of what would have happened if I hadn't managed to escape.

Brendan rode up next to the carriage window. My cheeks burned when he caught my eye, but he acted as though nothing had ever happened between us.

"It's not too late for you to turn back with Scarlet," he said. "I can send people with you to make sure you get back to the human realm."

"Are you turning back?"

"No, but this has always been my fight. And I've never liked the assassin idea. You gathered these people around you. What's a few more? There's still a chance we can solve this peacefully."

There really wasn't, but I would need to persuade the Darksiders to step aside in order for me to even reach Sadler. The Darksiders accompanying me could only help with that. "I'm going to need Dubh when we get closer."

He bobbed his head. "If that's what you want."

"I need to lead the way. They have to see me. I have to talk to them. It's the only way."

He reached through the opening to briefly touch my hand. "As you wish." He moved on, and I sat back in my seat.

Fiadh nudged me. "He's a decent king. Better than I expected."

"Hmm?" I realised I had been staring into space. "Oh. You need to stay in the carriage, and we could use more black flags. We need to make it obvious that we're declaring ourselves Darksiders." My hands were shaking. "I'll ride up front, and—"

"I'm riding with you," she said firmly, "as is Dymphna. Whatever the kings say, we three need to make sure that Sadler doesn't walk away from this." She gripped my hand tightly. "Promise me you'll do this for us, make our children safe."

The fanatical look in her eyes made me shiver. "Who will take care of the children if we ride out together?"

"They'll have Arlen and Anya, and even Bran. Not to mention all of the others. But you need _me_. I'm old blood, Cara. My station has never mattered to you, but it still does to many, even now, as diluted as Sadler has made my clan. I need to be seen. People there know me. I'll aid weight to any claim you make."

"I don't want to make a claim," I said. "I just want this to stop."

"Sometimes, we don't have a choice. We can change our minds tomorrow, but for today, you must be prepared for anything."

"Your husband is probably behind those walls."

"I'll face that when the time comes. We have more important worries to contend with first."

"I feel sick. Do you feel sick?"

She leaned back, closing her eyes. "When I was young, all I wanted was adventure. After everything that's happened, not much fazes me."

"You sound like you're looking forward to this."

"I have high hopes."

"You think this will work? That the Darksiders will just... let me pass?"

"We'll soon find out."

Too soon, I was on horseback and part of the lead group. I felt as though I were in a dream that was spiralling out of control. How had I managed to go from stuck in a dead-end human job to attempting to assassinate a faery king?

Behind me, the carriages followed in single file, black flags flying. The soldiers marched in parallel lines, and the rest of the Darksiders and servants brought up the rear.

I leaned forward to ask Sorcha, "Can't your god do something about Sadler's god? A deity death-match of some kind would really help."

"Don't you think a war would be highly rewarding for a god of death?"

She apparently missed the joke. I exchanged an amused glance with Brendan.

"Look at that," Vix said, pointing at the castle ahead. "He has every man, woman, and child incapable of using a weapon standing guard."

She was right. Lines of people stood outside the walls, most of them looking terrified.

"I have to ride ahead of the green and silver soldiers," I said. "With a small group of Darksiders."

"My assassin will accompany you," Drake said.

Brendan let out a little hiss. "That's a last resort. We give them a chance to surrender first."

"If Sadler doesn't die, then the ships will land," I said. "And the assassin can't be from a different court, or the people here will have no choice but to fight back. If one of us—a Darksider—assassinates him, then it'll be more acceptable to the people."

"Who?" Drake asked. "Who will do it?"

"I volunteered," Rumble lied. "It will be me."

"And I'm going in with Cara in case something goes wrong," Dymphna said.

"You don't have to do that," Sorcha said sharply.

"I'm a free fae, and I want to do this," the daoine sídhe retorted. "I want to look Sadler in the eye today."

"We will follow close behind," Brendan said. "Just in case."

I took a deep breath, nodded at my Darksider companions, and set off for the castle. If I was lucky, I would end Sadler before any of the others reached me. Then the deal would end, and Brendan and Drake would divide the land up between themselves. And I would have enough favours gathered to really help the remaining Darksiders... and my daughter.

When we grew closer to the castle, I realised I knew some of those standing outside the walls. I waved at Rat. The people around her stared as she gave me a pathetic wave back.

Could I really do it? I would be risking the lives of people like Rat if it all went wrong. I pulled on Dubh's reins, unable to continue.

"What's wrong?" Fiadh whispered impatiently.

I shook my head. "I just need... a minute."

"Where's Sadler?" Drake called from behind me.

"In the castle," someone answered. "Are you here to kill us all then?"

"You won't die today by our hands," Brendan answered.

Voices rang out in protest, some of them claiming they wouldn't listen to a king of a rival court. I urged Dubh forward and held up my hand, praying for the right words to come. Whispers surged through the crowd. I made an effort to relax and used that emotion. I pushed it out to everyone around me in an attempt to calm them.

I attempted a smile, but I feared it looked more like a grimace. "Don't you remember me?" I asked.

Most of the faces staring back at me were blank and hard. The rest held terror, their owners already accepting that it was their day to die.

I pointed at my group. "You can see the Darksiders amongst us, some of them soldiers, many of them forcibly expelled from their homes."

"Traitors!" someone shouted.

"We brought home our queen," Vix said scornfully. "How does that make us traitors?"

I held up my hand to display my wedding ring. "You know who I am. Your king forced me to marry him. I lived here as a prisoner, but many of you were good to me. I left to save my child from Sadler's madness. I know he's using Deorad's children to keep himself young. I couldn't let that happen to my daughter, and when I heard what he was doing, I knew I had to come back and stop him."

"A princess?" somebody asked, her voice filled with awe.

I nodded vigorously. "Yes! She's here with me, untainted, completely clean. That means there's hope for us. It's not over. The land isn't completely dead. She's a sign. We can't give up now."

"It's a lie!" a woman shouted. "Her child died. It was a monster, I heard. Deformed."

I gripped the reins a little tighter. "It's not a lie." I tried to keep my voice even. "I came back to plead with Sadler to end his deal with his god. Ships will soon arrive, carrying the dead to fight on Sadler's behalf. Who will die first? The people guarding Sadler's door." I crossed my fingers, praying they wouldn't try to fight. I could almost taste the bloodlust coming from the Silver army.

"He's our king," an old man said. "He knows best. He _has_ to know best."

"Then that makes me your queen," I said, "and my daughter your princess. Let me pass so I can speak to my husband."

"It's a trick!" another yelled. "A human is no queen."

"She's the one who fed you," Rat said. "She's the one who gave her own food to the tents."

"And the goddess's flower grew here because of her," the head gardener called out.

Voices murmured arguments and rumours. I looked back at Brendan. He didn't appear concerned. Vix and Rumble moved closer to me, causing more chatter. Fiadh's presence appeared to puzzle many of the fae. I heard Glic's name mentioned more than once.

"We can't stop her from returning," one man said.

"He's the king!" a second shouted.

"A king who murders us at will."

"How many more of us have to die?"

"We'll die if we betray him!"

Fiadh clapped her hands. "Make a choice! A mad king or a queen with an unblemished heir. My line stands with the latter."

Rat raced over to stand beside Dubh. "I choose the queen."

"Get behind the soldiers where it's safe," I told her. "And thank you, Rat."

She beamed and ran to join my group. Donncha and his warriors marched forward and lined up at Dubh's rear. The head gardener urged a number of people to cross over onto our side. Most refused, but after much persuasion, enough moved out of my path.

I rode Dubh closer, and the gates slowly opened. My hands were shaking uncontrollably. I was full of doubt, but when I thought of my daughter in the hands of Sadler, I knew I had to go through with it.

In the courtyard in front of the ruined castle, Sadler stood tall, surrounded by heavily armed soldiers. The last time I had seen him, he had been weakened, maybe even dying. He looked strong but more touched with the blight than ever.

"I hear my wife has returned to me," he called. "Along with the heir to my throne." He gestured at his soldiers. "Kill her. Take the child."

A group of armed men raced toward me. People on either side of the gates screamed and ran. Dubh danced backward a few steps. To my dismay, _my_ Darksiders rushed forward to meet the soldiers in battle, Donncha at their lead. He whirled, cutting down two soldiers, and then the fight moved too fast for me to see. But the battle would only end in senseless death. Drake, Brendan, and Sorcha raced forward to join me, and I knew it was all going wrong.

"Stop!" I shouted, sending my emotion outward to ensure the soldiers felt it. It was my best weapon against Sadler, and I had no choice but to use it. I had to step knee-deep into my emotions and wield them. "Stop it!"

Dazed, Sadler's soldiers backed away. My Darksiders obeyed, also.

"I didn't come here to watch Darksiders die!"

Sadler sneered. "Then why did you come?"

"I'm here to talk some sense into you before you have every Darksider killed for nothing," I replied.

"You're here as a mouthpiece for rival courts." He spat on the ground. "Look at them, Green and Silver pretending with their black flags."

"The black flags are for the Darksiders who ride with us. They don't want to die, not by the hands of the dead."

He looked momentarily startled, but as he recognised familiar faces around me, he relaxed. "All I see are traitors who defected because they're weaklings. Let them die. The strong stand by me."

"You're a terrible king," I said. "You're too consumed with hatred and bitterness to ever rule properly. You're going to sacrifice all of these people for what? What is your god going to give you? What do _you_ have to give?"

"I'll give everything to see that bastard squirm! I'll give a war and thousands dead to give Brendan the punishment he deserves!"

"You don't have thousands," I said. "Not anymore. You drove them all away. You'll lose a war long before the ships ever arrive." I prayed he wouldn't question my bluff.

"I don't care!"

"There doesn't have to be a war. We can negotiate peace terms with your people. You can end your deal with your god before you kill everyone here. The ships land on the Darkside. Do you really think you can control the dead?"

"I don't want peace. Why would I want peace? This is the court of chaos. We'll revel in the end of days."

"You misunderstand me," I said quietly. "You'll be punished for your crimes, Sadler, but don't let these people die for nothing. Let them leave. Let them look for safety. Stop using them as shields!"

"They belong to me. If I say they die, then they die!"

A number of people shuffled away from Sadler's gates and toward me.

"Kill them!" he roared at his soldiers. "Kill them all."

Some of the soldiers were still too dazed to listen, while the rest looked uncertainly at Rumble then at each other. Rumble had been Sadler's, always. And now he was mine. To them, that said more than having Fiadh on my side, more than any number of tribesmen chiefs.

"Don't do it," I said. "Sadler, you don't have to do this."

"I want to be remembered as the one who cleaned this land of the blight."

"The taint? We can—"

"The weakness!" He looked at his soldiers in disgust. "And what do I care for these people? They're servants. They're nothing. They have no names."

"They have names!" I dismounted and walked toward him.

"Careful," Rumble said from behind me. "Not too close."

"I have to get close," I murmured. "There's no turning back now."

The crowd surged forward, surrounding us with only a few feet on all sides. I faced Sadler, but he still had soldiers who could end me before I managed to put my hand to my dagger. Rumble and Vix would help me. I knew that, but my courage failed me yet again. It was just like with Reynard. I couldn't stomach killing someone in cold blood. I had to let him remind me of exactly the kind of monster he really was.

Sadler glanced at my stomach. "Where is the child, _wife_?"

"She's here," I said. "And she's not one of your tainted monsters, either. She's proof the taint can be overcome. The fact that Brighid's flowers grow in the soil proves that the land can be healed. The Darkside can be _saved_."

Another soldier moved from Sadler's side. If I just kept talking, I could carve out enough space to do him some damage.

"And... and these people aren't worthless. They have souls and minds of their own. They don't deserve to die because you're angry."

Sadler scowled. "They will all die because my god wills it so."

"You're wrong," I said. "They won't let you kill them."

I sensed more people joining my group.

Sadler's gaze shifted to Brendan, who pushed his way through the crowds to stand with me. "Still using bitches to do your dirty work?"

"Don't," I whispered as Brendan took a step forward. I sensed others breaking through the crowd, but I didn't dare take my eyes off Sadler to see who they were.

"Kill her!" Sadler shouted. "Now, before it's too late."

I stood still and held out my arms. I felt strangely calm, as if I could see every move, every outcome, before I even took a turn. "I'm one of them, Sadler. I'm a Darksider. You saw me in some mirror and made me one of them. But you're just a monster throwing a dangerous tantrum." I dipped into the well of emotion I had spent a lifetime blocking off. I let the anger and frustration, the fear and pain I had felt at Sadler's hands bubble to the surface. "And you are weak. You're a coward. You're afraid of a human, afraid of the other courts. You don't even have the power to stop your own addiction. You. Are. Nothing."

"She _dares_ ," he spluttered. "Kill her now."

"No," Rumble said, stepping ahead of me. "It's over, Sadler. You're done."

Sadler cackled. "And who will take my place? Eh? Who will rule the sullied?"

I moved my hand to my dagger. It was time.

"I will," Drake said, brushing past me to stand in the centre. "I will take your place."

I glanced at Brendan. He looked only slightly less shocked than I felt.

Drake turned sideways to address the crowd. "Deorad was my father, and Sadler's heir is my daughter. I'm a branded king in my own right. Who better to take over the Dark Court?"

Murmurs travelled through the crowd. A few heads bobbed as if in agreement.

Drake pointed his sword at Sadler. "Get on your knees and denounce your throne. Give up the crown, and call me your heir. I'll show you mercy, and then I'll take the Darkside into my own realm."

Brendan's people moved almost as quickly as Drake's. Sorcha ran to stand at Drake's back, her arms outstretched and her eyes a filmy grey as she prepared to invite death. Arlen held Brendan back, but the king— _my friend_ —struggled against his nature. He had hoped to regain some of his land, but all along, Drake had been working to steal it from him again.

"Do it, Sadler," Drake said, giving Brendan an anxious glance. "There's not much time."

"No!" I shouted. "This isn't how it's supposed to happen. There are innocent people in that tower giving him life. He's supposed to be dead. He can't just carry on forever, using the lives of others to prop himself up!"

"That's their choice to make," Drake said, refusing to look at me. "They sided with him. They must deal with the consequences."

"They didn't choose this!" I stared at him, searching for anything familiar in his face. "And the ships. Don't forget about the ships."

"Be quiet, Cara. This is none of your business."

Sadler laughed heartedly. "Ruthless. I appreciate that. A man after my own heart. Deorad got one thing right, after all."

"I'll grant you pardon," Drake said in a voice I barely recognised. "Just say the words."

Panicked, I looked at Brendan, but he had stopped fighting Arlen. It was no use. If he moved against Drake, the banshee would hit back. I bit my knuckle. Sadler was going to get away with everything he had done to me, to everyone. I couldn't bear it. Blood thundered in my ears, and dark spots dotted my vision. I shook my head. I couldn't show any weakness. I still had a job to do, for my daughter, for the Darksiders trapped in the tower, for Brendan.

I had been forgotten. All eyes were on Sadler and Drake. I inched toward Sadler's blindside, for the first time thankful I had damaged his eye.

"Pass the crown to you?" Sadler said as if considering the option. "We could rule together. Me as advisor. You could have it all. The entire realm."

Before anyone could stop me, I closed the space between us. Reaching up, I gripped Sadler's hair, yanked his head back, and sliced his throat. As crimson ran down his front, his eyes briefly widened with surprise before darkening. His face relaxed into a peaceful expression, and I hated that. The dying was quicker than I thought it would be. His body slid to the ground, and everyone stared in silence. His blood was warm and sticky on my hands, and I didn't care because it meant others lived. It meant my daughter was safe from him. I had done what was necessary, and by the look on Drake's face, there would be consequences.

The doctor came out of nowhere, raising his staff to strike me. Rumble stepped in his way and plunged his sword through the doctor's gut.

I watched the doctor fall, then I looked down at Sadler's blood. A crescendo of noise built in my ears. I realised it was the people around me, whispering, shouting, condemning.

Vix and Rumble flanked me, and Donncha and his soldiers formed a semi-circle around me. If the Darksiders attacked, we could all die.

"You shouldn't have done that," Drake whispered harshly. "You've made it so much harder for them to trust me."

" _I_ don't trust you," I said.

Drake dropped his sword and held up his hands. "You heard my words, but the human moved out of turn. I would have pardoned him, but now the throne is empty. _I_ can fill it. I can be your king. We'll merge courts and grow stronger together."

I kicked away his sword and pointed my bloody dagger at his throat. Gasps came from the crowd... and murmurs of approval. The fae had a long history of getting what they wanted through blood. And I was showing them how heartless I really was. The mood shifted. I was betting the crowd would back me over Drake, and from his expression, he was wondering the same thing.

Sorcha let out a howl of rage and stepped toward me.

"Stop!" Drake ordered.

Sorcha looked at him in disbelief. "She's going to take it from us. This isn't how it was supposed to end."

"Don't touch her," he said. His hands were shaking, but so were mine.

It killed the banshee to back off, but at his urging, she finally did. I knew by the anger in her eyes that this was one act she would never forgive.

"What are you doing?" Drake mouthed.

"I'm not letting you do this," I said fiercely. "I _can't_ let you do this."

Drake's soldiers pushed forward at Sorcha's swift command, but so did the Darksiders... without a word from me.

Drake held up his hands to stop his soldiers. "Cara, you're upset. You don't realise what you're doing. I understand."

"Then understand this," I said coolly. "I'm not letting you steal this. I won't let you spark a war with Brendan. And I won't let these people suffer under another fool who thinks they're worthless. You've told me they deserve to die. Just like Sadler. You will give up everything to satisfy your need for revenge. Just like Sadler. He was right about you. I don't even recognise you anymore."

"Calm down," he said gently, but I could see the impatience in the tightness of his jaw. "Let me deal with this, and everything can go back to normal. You can go home and feel safe again. You never belonged here, and now I can make everything right. I can end the Chaos Court. It was never supposed to exist."

"Neither was the Silver Court." I glanced at Brendan. His expression had tightened. I gave him a pleading look, hoping he would understand. He didn't react. He was just... waiting. "Sadler's dead," I called out. "That means his throne goes to his heir."

"And as her father, I should—" Drake started.

"She's _my_ daughter!" I cried. "You've never claimed her. You just want to use her, too. The people here deserve to be cared about. They deserve to find out how to end the taint in the soil. They deserve to have healthy children! I won't let you take what belongs to them just to raise yourself higher above them, above Brendan. This belongs to Scarlet. It's her right, it's her heritage, and I won't let anyone take it from her. This belongs to my baby, and I'll speak for her until she's old enough. And if you try to take it from her, I'll kill you myself, I swear."

"You've lost your mind," he said. "How can you run a court? You have no power."

"Because I care! I care about these people and what happens to them. That makes me the right person to speak on their behalf."

He gave me a pitying look. "You're naïve if you think that's all it takes to rule. They'll murder you in your sleep. You have no idea what you're doing, Cara. You're just a human."

"I'm more than that," I said fiercely, needing to believe it myself. "I'm _more_."

He lowered his voice. "Are you trying to punish me? Is this some petty revenge?"

"This is bigger than you and me," I said. "Can't you see what you're doing? What you'll stir up?"

"Then it's for him," he said coldly. "You're doing this on Brendan's behalf." His lip curled up into a sneer. "There's a monster inside of him, you know. It's only a matter of time before it shows itself again."

"I think there's one inside me, too," I whispered.

"This is your heir," Fiadh called out, riding up with Scarlet in her arms. I hadn't even noticed her leaving.

Scarlet was wide-eyed, but she looked perfect, like a little princess complete with a black ribbon in her hair. And in the sunlight, the veins in her temple glistened green. For the first time, I saw what everyone else saw. I saw a faery. My daughter had always been _more_.

Sounds of surprise spread through the crowd, then a burst of energy exploded outward as people began to yell and cheer. A crow flew lazily over our heads. A huge blue bird with a hooked beak and webbed feet dropped a white lily in the centre of the crowd.

"A peace lily," someone shouted from behind me, making me jump.

"The ships are sinking!" a man yelled from the back of the carriages. "The water fae are spreading the word. The ships are sinking because Sadler is dead!"

"She saved us!"

"Queen Badb! Queen Badb risen again!"

"It's time to go," Brendan said coldly. "The Darksiders have spoken and chosen for themselves. The child is their heir by law. Her mother is regent. Let us leave them be in their time of... celebration."

The Darksiders whooped and cheered and yelled, "Queen Badb" again and again.

Drake gripped my hand. He looked hurt. "You couldn't have trusted me?"

"You made it impossible," I said, breathless with fear and adrenaline.

He stalked off. He glanced back at me once, anger flaring in his eyes. He probably hated me, and I wasn't sure I even cared. Brendan turned away from me, but I caught his hand to stop him.

"Wait," I said urgently. "Let me explain."

"You don't have anything you need to explain." But there was no smile.

"I had to do it. We needed him dead. We all agreed there was no other choice. There was no _time_. The ships were too close, and—"

"I know," he said. "It was brave of you to take his life in front of so many."

"Don't look at me like that. _Please_. Let me explain, Brendan."

"You don't have to explain a thing. I understand." His voice turned cold. "I understand _everything_. You've been planning this from the start, and I've been so foolish and blind that I couldn't see what everyone else saw."

My cheeks flushed with heat. "I always planned to kill him. It was the only way to be sure that he wouldn't ever take Scarlet from me. But the other stuff... just happened."

"Was it Drake's idea?" he asked with enough scorn to send shivers down my spine. "Trip up Brendan with a human? Make him blind to her manipulation for long enough to steal land from right under his nose?"

"No! I never planned anything with Drake. You have to listen to me!"

He ran his hands through his hair. "All of those times I... you know, I'm almost impressed. You really had me fooled. I thought I saw the real you, but you're nothing but a conniving little—"

"Brendan! I didn't plan on taking the Darkside. I didn't know what Drake was going to do."

"I don't believe you," he said flatly. "I thought... I don't know what I thought." He gripped my shoulders as he studied my face. "Was it all a lie? And there I was, letting you build your little army because I saw your confidence grow with each soul who trusted you enough to follow you around. How _stupid_ you must think me."

I wrapped my arms around his neck. I needed to touch his skin, to make him understand the real truth. "I didn't do anything to hurt you. The only thing I lied about were my intentions for Sadler. That was all."

He brushed me off. "Go be with your people, Chaos Queen. Celebrate. You saved them today."

"You're my people, too," I whispered.

"You drew a line today." He gestured at Drake's retreating back. "It appears a lot of lines were drawn today."

"I couldn't let him do it. I couldn't let Drake use Scarlet any more than I could let Sadler."

"I understand that. I understand the desperate actions of a mother, but I never doubted you, and you fooled me. You're a dangerous creature, Cara Kelly."

"I'm not." A lump in my throat made it hard to speak. "I didn't want him to have more power than you. He would have let Sorcha hurt you if I didn't do something. Somebody had to do _something_. And you said it yourself. Power corrupts. The more power you have, the more you have to do to keep it."

"So you think yourself infallible? That it won't corrupt you?"

I shook my head. "I didn't want to be left helpless again. Can't you understand what I went through with Sadler? And my father? Can't you see I would do anything to save Scarlet from that life?"

A fleeting look of pity crossed his face. "I... I can see that nothing will get in your way when it comes to your daughter. But I would have done anything to keep her safe."

"But it'll be out of your control! Nobody can protect her like I will. Nobody else will care enough. I stole power to protect her, but I was trying to protect you, too."

He hardened his expression again. "As you say."

I understood a little of what was going through his head. He had been _the_ king, but he was pushed further and further away from power with every move Drake and I made. Even Scarlet may have stolen a little of his power, judging by that glimmer under her skin that was so like his.

I only had one card left to play, one way to make him understand. I let myself feel all of the pain and fear running through my veins, and I rose up on my tiptoes to kiss him. But when I did, when his hands automatically came around me, something else flew out of me. And for once, I didn't try to stop him from knowing how I felt about him.

He flinched then looked down at me as if stunned. "Now what?"

"I'll always be your friend, even if you can't be mine."

"Charmer." His eyes twinkled. He squeezed my shoulder. "Good luck, Cara. You'll need it." And then he left.

The Darksiders grew louder, pressing around us. I looked around for friendly faces and saw Vix giving me a bemused look.

"Oh, shut up." I took Scarlet from Fiadh. "Why are they shouting Queen Badb?"

"She was a warrior goddess," Fiadh explained. "She and the crow were linked, and she fought ferociously for her people. Just as you did today."

"I didn't know what I was doing," I said nervously. "I just knew it had to end."

"Well, it worked. You came at the right time, and the people responded."

"They responded to Scarlet," I said. "I'm just minding things until I can figure something else out."

Fiadh laughed softly. "They were only too happy to accept their queen back into the fold. We should get inside before the other kings change their minds." She patted my arm. "I'm glad you took my advice about charming him. He'll be easier to deal with, at least."

I didn't bother correcting her. I was falling for Brendan, whether I liked it or not, and the feeling was nothing like how I had felt about Drake.

Once all of the Darksiders were in the courtyard, some of the men began slowly sliding the gates closed. My non-Darksider friends stood with the carriages, watching as I was shut away from them. I could tell Anya was crying, even at that distance.

One by one, they turned away until Brendan was the only one left standing. I waved at him, feeling mournful despite the celebratory atmosphere. Bekind flew through the gates at the very last minute, and then they slammed shut.

Rat scurried up to me. "I'm glad you're back."

"Thanks," I said. I looked at Fiadh, who wore a smug grin. "So... what now?"

"Whatever you say. You're in charge." She gave a little bow, making Scarlet giggle. "You're the queen, remember?"

My hands shook so badly I clenched them. The magnitude of my actions hit me at last. I had just earned myself a broken kingdom, and I had no idea what to do with it. But Sadler was dead, and the ships were gone, at least for now.

"I think it's time to celebrate." I followed the rest of the Darksiders into the Chaos Castle.

_My_ castle.

# Introduction

Blight (Chaos #5)

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By Claire Farrell

Editing by Red Adept Editing Services

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As the blight spreads, destroying the land, Cara's new subjects turn on her, and Brendan and Drake are no longer there to help her. The Darksiders thought she'd be pliable, or maybe even a miracle-worker, and it's not as easy to scrub away Sadler's influence as she thought.

But Scarlet isn't her only priority any more, and once the ceremony to swear her in as regent is done, it'll be time for Cara to join forces with the kings, find a way to stop the blight, and prove to the fae that she can be the leader they need.

It took a Darksider to steal the throne; it'll take a faery queen to keep it.
Copyright © Claire Farrell

Claire_farrell@live.ie

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Cover by Yocla Designs

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Licence Notes:

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_All rights reserved. This eBook may not be re-sold_.

 Created with Vellum 

# Chapter 1

I sat on a cold stone throne and clung to my sleeping daughter, wondering what the hell I had just done. I hadn't been thinking. I had to go back and tell everyone I had changed my mind—I wasn't cut out to be queen of a stolen court. And yet my feet didn't move, and no sound came out of my mouth. I stayed there—a human perched on a faery throne earned through blood and betrayal—and watched Darksiders, _my subjects_ , milling about, rushing to clear the evidence that there had ever been a faery king in that broken-down castle. _My_ castle.

I looked down at Scarlet and whispered, "Our castle."

Bekind, my immortal ancestor, lay at my feet in her cursed form as a black cat. She had kept secrets from me in the past, maybe even deceived me, but I trusted her more than anyone else there. She stretched out her claws, looking more relaxed than I felt.

I gazed upon the Darksiders, seeking familiar faces. The heavily bearded Jackie and his four sons were getting drunk at the far end of the hall with Bas, the sharp-toothed chief of a tribe that had been on the run when we'd come across them on our way to face Sadler. The tribesmen celebrated as though danger didn't still hang in the air.

Rumble, one of the many illegitimate offspring of my daughter's twisted grandfather, stood by my side, his maimed face covered by a heavy helmet that revealed nothing. His presence helped me cling to the notion of safety. He had betrayed his mad king for me, but that was because he was loyal to the Dark Court—which meant he was loyal to me for as long as it benefited the Darksiders.

Sadler's terrifying tapestries were being torn from the walls by overeager Darksiders. The last time I'd been in the castle had been the night I'd fled for my life while in labour with Scarlet—the night Rumble had stood aside and let me leave, even at the risk of his own life. And when I'd murdered his king and stolen the court from Drake, who claimed a blood right to the throne, Rumble had protected me from harm because my baby had a blood right, too.

I had already been seen as Queen of the Chaos Court after I'd been forced into a marriage with Sadler. The Darksiders seemed to view my murder of Sadler and betrayal of Drake as some sort of initiation. I was truly one of them now, the bonus being my child, who was seen by many as an heir to all three courts and the only child on the Darkside to escape the taint on the realm.

Rumble's friend and relative, Vix, paced in front of us, her expression brooding. Strong and ruthless, she kept her true feelings under lock and key whenever possible. But as she rubbed her hand against the shorn half of her head, she caught my eye and frowned. Did she already regret siding with me? I had no idea what the repercussions of my actions would be.

To protect Brendan, I had betrayed Drake, but Brendan felt betrayed by both of us. Drake might have been Scarlet's biological father, but he had turned into something I didn't recognise. The last thing the Dark Court needed was a king who despised them as Drake did. But in one fell swoop, I had lost my allies. To safeguard my daughter, I needed to hold on to the throne of the Chaos Court, and that meant keeping people like Vix on my side.

I tried to get comfortable, but the stone throne only reminded me of Sadler's cruelty and madness. His wedding rings were still on my finger, but the current problems in the realm had started with Sadler long before I had ever been born. The days I had spent as his prisoner in the castle tower had been eventful, and the year I had spent back in the human realm had been dull in comparison. Perhaps I had underestimated the value of dull. Sadler hadn't been the only addict around—a great number of my choices could be blamed on my unending desire to be around the fae.

I breathed deeply, wondering how the hell I was going to take care of so many people in a land that refused to grow food, a place that tainted the children born within it until they became deformed monsters. All but Scarlet. The teardrop pupil in her left eye was the only sign of the taint. I, on the other hand, held the taint in the veins of my inner elbow.

But that was the least of my concerns. The frantic racing of the fae around me had given me a headache, and the gnawing feelings of regret kept growing.

I stood, balancing Scarlet on my hip. "Stop!"

Everyone froze and looked my way. There were so many fae. But so many more had already left. Those who remained looked to me for direction, for guidance—no, for orders. Fiadh—a tall, elegant noble from an old family who had encouraged my actions—was watching me closely, a smile curving her thin lips. Bart, a hunchback who may have come from an unreachable land, stood across the room and waited, his face alight with curiosity. Everyone expected me to have a clue about what I was doing, but I had made a mistake. I was just a human. I needed to go home.

But that wasn't what came out of my mouth. "Enough," I said. "We'll purge another day. Tonight, we eat. All of us. And tomorrow, we can deal with what needs to be done." I held up my chin. "I want to see the ones Sadler was using to stay alive."

"You don't want to see them," Vix murmured from behind my chair.

"I have to," I whispered back.

Rumble stepped forward. "You heard your queen. Prepare a meal." He nodded at Rat, my nervous maid from the time of my imprisonment. Her cheeks were no longer chubby and round, a sure sign that Sadler hadn't been feeding his people. "And ensure a room is ready for her, too."

"My old room will do for now," I said.

Some of the fae spoke excitedly under their breaths, shooting me awed smiles, but others watched me with eyes like those of Reynard, a dark-minded faery I had killed to protect my daughter. If there were more like him, I had willingly walked into the snake pit with my own daughter. I hadn't been able to trust anyone to protect her. I needed the power to do it myself, and maybe I finally had it. But could I keep it?

Rumble and Vix led the way to the staircase. Fiadh followed, leaving her tainted son with Conn, her bodyguard. The stairs were filthy, and the castle stank of neglect. What had Sadler been doing since I ran?

I stopped to look out a large window at the top of the stairs. In the distance, I could still see flags of green and silver spread across the landscape. Donncha, a hardworking soldier who had replaced Reynard, was still outside with his team, watching to make sure the other courts left for home. _Home_ : a word that held so much meaning yet had meant nothing to me.

But as we walked up the stairs—as we grew closer to the forbidden tower Sadler's troubled son, Deorad, had been held in—a strangely content feeling crept over me. I was where I was supposed to be. I'd done it. I'd stopped Sadler from hurting anyone else, and his doctor—a man who had tortured me—was gone, too. A huge weight was lifted from my shoulders.

Rumble hesitated by the door at the top of the tower. I nodded at him. He opened the door, and I stepped inside, holding back a gasp. I had been warned, but I hadn't been prepared.

A life of excess and a long period of time spent in the human realm, drugged on human emotion, had left Sadler old and frail—until he'd discovered a way to harness his own son's vitality with black magic. Sadler had been renewed until the night I escaped. My last act before leaving was to put Deorad out of his misery, stopping the same black magic that was tainting the realm.

But without his son, Sadler had found another way. Half the court was related to him through his son, and he had replaced Deorad with a dozen others. Twelve comatose figures lay on makeshift pallets on the floor. Unsurprisingly, they all had jet-black hair. They appeared lifeless, but a familiar-looking woman with straw-coloured hair tended to them.

The midwife looked up and gave me a wry smile. "You're back."

"And you're still here."

"Nobody was allowed to leave when you left." She rinsed out a blackened cloth in a dank bucket. "So I stayed here to take care of these. The ones who survived, anyway."

I peered at the unconscious fae. "I don't understand. He's dead. Why aren't they waking up?"

The midwife's smile died on her lips. "Before, they only lasted a certain amount of time before he had to replace them. Now that Sadler's dead, they're dying, too. They've been under for far too long."

My stomach flipped over. I thought I was saving them by taking Sadler's life. I had just doomed them. "Are they suffering?"

The midwife hesitated. "I can't say."

I handed Scarlet to Fiadh and knelt by the closest person. She was small and young, her skin a pretty shade of lavender. She looked more like a pixie than anything else. I took her hand and squeezed her fingers, feeling a deep sorrow as I remembered how I had left my own pixie friend behind.

"There's nothing you can do for them," the midwife said gently. "They were lost as soon as Sadler let the doctor near them."

"Get them out of this room." I looked up at Vix. "Tell the servants to clear out Sadler's rooms. Set up beds for all of these people, and organise experienced faeries to take care of them. If there's any change, come to me at once."

"They're dying," the midwife insisted.

"Then they'll die in more comfort than this." I frowned. "But help might come in time."

"Help?"

Ignoring her, I took Scarlet and left the room.

Vix followed on my heels. "Don't change too much, too soon."

"Change can't come too soon to this place," I said bitterly. "While you're at it, find Rat. Tell her to come to me."

"Rat? Why?"

"She's getting a promotion." I sighed. "Just do it, Vix. Please."

"Forget the manners," she said nastily, pushing Rumble out of the way to get ahead of us.

The headache was beginning to feel like a migraine.

"Where do you want to go?" Rumble asked.

I hesitated. I wanted to see Brendan, I realised suddenly. I wanted the chance to explain. But some things were more important than what I wanted. "I'm going to my old room. Help Fiadh find some quarters, and make sure Rat comes to me as soon as possible." I looked down at Scarlet. "And I need somebody to send a message to the Miacha." I thought of the retreating army. "Tomorrow. They can go tomorrow. On Dubh."

"I'll leave you to rest before dinner," Fiadh said. "I don't need help. I'll take back my old rooms. My husband isn't here."

"Be careful anyway," I said. "I'll see you this evening."

She left Scarlet and me alone with Rumble.

"Am I crazy?" I asked him. "Is this just the maddest thing that anyone has ever done?"

He escorted me toward my old room. "Not unless you're planning on raising the dead."

And a spark brightened in my chest. I had done the right thing. Sadler had made a deal with a mad god, one that would send an army of dead to destroy the faery realm. His death had ended the deal, and the war ships had disappeared—as far as we knew.

"Think the ships are really gone?" I asked as we walked along a corridor toward the stairs leading to my tower room.

"Gods aren't easily appeased. It may be that this particular god feels we owe him a debt."

"A shiny gift in a faery circle on a midsummer's day or a gift-of-blood kind of debt?" I didn't require an answer. I already knew that Sadler's god was cruel and bloodthirsty.

We reached my room. It looked exactly the same as when I'd left. Rumble began to light the fire while I shut the door and sat on the bed. Strangely enough, I felt more comfortable in my cell.

"There are larger rooms," Rumble said. "More luxurious ones. Are you sure this is where you should sleep?"

I looked around the circular room. "A bigger room will only make me nervous—too many places to hide. For now, we're better off here." I searched in the wardrobe and found maternity clothes. For some reason, that made me smile and think of my bump rather than the terrible things that had happened to me during that time. "What do I do now?"

"The people will want to reaffirm their fealty." Rumble turned to look at me. "Expect them to come to you tonight. They think that's what the dinner is for."

"It's just so they can eat. What do I do with the fealty pledges? I mean, how am I supposed to act?"

"Accept their loyalty with the grace they deserve." He turned back to his task. "The words don't matter. You're the one in charge. You set the rules. Do not hesitate, and all will be well."

"Where's the bad news, Rumble?"

He hesitated. "Always prepare yourself for betrayal."

"From the people who live in court?"

"From the kings."

I shivered. "I don't think they'll hurt us. They might try to use us, but we can handle that."

"And if they force you to take sides when they declare war on one another?"

That made me smile. "Then I'll have to bang their heads together to knock some sense into them. What about the fae who don't swear fealty? Do they stay or leave?"

"That's your choice. Think on your policy because you'll need to be prepared."

Rat scurried into the room. Her face fell when she saw that the fire was already lit. She took one look at my daughter and got on her knees.

"Rat," I said impatiently as she crawled across the floor. "What on earth are you doing?"

She cowered. "I just wanted to look at her. Only for a second. That's all."

"Get up." I deliberately softened my tone. "Don't do that. You can look at her."

She hesitantly rose to her feet, not looking directly at Scarlet. "She's..." Rat swallowed hard. "I can't help it. They say she's our reward for our suffering, that the goddess herself sent her to us. They say—"

"Why don't you get us some water? We've had a long journey."

"Of course," she said. "Of course. I should do that."

"And Rat," I said as she prepared to leave. "I'm going to need your help with Scarlet, so you're going to be spending a lot of time with us, okay?"

Her pink eyes clouded, and she nodded.

I lay back on the bed and squeezed my eyes shut as Scarlet clambered onto the floor to explore the room. I had to be roughly twice as crazy as Sadler if I thought this was ever going to work.

The meal was a meagre soup, but everyone had a taste, and that was what mattered to me. I had to send the message that they were all as worthy to me as each other. The so-called elite received the same food as the maids and gardeners and everyone else.

I spoke to Deorad's offspring as much as possible, pointedly asking their names to let the court know they were no longer considered unimportant or nameless. The atmosphere remained solemn. I sat on the edge of my seat, waiting for something awful to happen.

"It's time," Rumble whispered to me at the end of the eerily silent meal. "You'll need to take your place above them now."

He had talked me through it earlier. Some members of the Chaos Court were ready to swear their fealty to me, but others were not. Until an official ceremony declared me regent, they could easily overthrow me without any recourse. I was walking a delicate line.

Swallowing hard, I picked up Scarlet and walked toward the stone thrones. I sat on my own and avoided looking at Sadler's. A slender male faery walked toward me first. At first glance, his beady eyes looked cruel, but his lips naturally curved upward in a way that made him appear pleasant.

"That's Rafe," Vix said under her breath from my left. "He'll officiate the crowning ceremony. He's clever, but Sadler never had any time for him. You need him on your side. For now."

The faery bowed low at my feet. His long, curled hair was a copper shade, meaning he was probably not related to Sadler, and he had surprisingly small black wings veined with copper. The wings meant he was unlikely to be a noble.

His voice rang out as he spoke. "I am your servant. My life is in your hands. I belong to the heir and her regent."

But could I trust him with our lives? It was time for me to make things clear. I stood and handed Scarlet to Rat, who looked mortified. Rafe stepped back, a look of bewilderment across his face.

A murmur ran around the room, and I realised everyone was staring at Rat, the one who got to hold the heir. She blushed and hid her smile.

"Be careful," Vix hissed.

I ignored her. "Thank you for being the first, Rafe. And you are free to take back those words if you don't like what I say next."

His eyes flashed to Rat then back to me. "Oh... of course."

I faced the court. "I know fealty is something some of you need to pledge," I called out. "But first, we need to understand each other. I'm not Sadler. There will be no nameless, no unworthy in my eyes. No slaves to the court either. You're all free fae now. If you wish to go, you can go. I won't force your loyalty, and whether you give it or not, you're still free to stay or go. But we need to deal with the blight on this land, and if you stay, be aware that there is a lot of work to do to repair this place. Not just our land, but our relationships with the other courts need to be fixed. I'm here because if I go, somebody somewhere will force you into fealty. It's up to you if you want to stay with me or not."

I sat down and held my breath then felt the colour drain from my face when a number of fae left the room, avoiding my gaze as they slipped away. I took Scarlet back and tried not to look as distressed as I felt.

Rafe cleared his throat. "My pledge remains intact. In fact, I'm looking forward to negotiating with the other courts."

I nodded at him, unsure of what else I was supposed to do.

He moved aside, and Fiadh strode up to the throne. Whispers about the Baron's daughter rose and fell. Fiadh knelt low at my feet, but when she spoke, her words carried across the room. "My house aligns itself with the warrior queen." She looked up at me and smiled. "My father and grandfather would speak the same words if they had survived Sadler's treacherous reign."

I had no idea what to do, so I held my hand out and helped her to her feet. "Thank you."

"I offer myself in any capacity."

Conn followed and knelt with Setanta in his arms. In a thin, reedy voice, Setanta declared the same words as his mother. When I took his hand, Scarlet giggled and grabbed his arm. The boy smiled, his eyes a little brighter.

Conn spoke words of his own, and then everything became a blur. One by one, faces familiar and strange came before me and pledged their loyalty and faith. Each time they put their lives in my hands, I trembled at the significance of what they were saying. The words merged, the faces swam, and as I touched each hand, a feeling of triumph gripped me. It was overwhelming and terrifying, but some part of me revelled in it. In my head, I danced and ran in a haze of power. I belonged with the fae. Nobody could send me away anymore. They would love me, Scarlet would be safe, and everything would be okay.

But the warmth in the room was stifling, and the rush of excitement made me jittery. Across the sea of kneeling fae, I caught Bart's eye. His grin widened as he held my gaze, and I realised he hadn't knelt at my feet or declared himself mine. I couldn't break my eyes away.

Music began to play, distracting me from Bart. A band had started up, but they played something livelier than the last time I'd heard them. I looked for Bart again, but he was gone. The seductive blur of power was over, and I blinked fast, trying to tether myself back to earth again. I needed Grim. I needed Zoe. And when I thought of what had happened outside the gates—the way Drake had looked at me and how disappointed Brendan had been—I knew I had a lot to answer for.

I beckoned Rafe to my side. "I hear you'll be officiating for us."

"If that's acceptable to you."

I couldn't hide my smile at his attempt at humbleness. "And when will the ceremony happen?"

"As quickly as possible. The Winter Solstice is almost upon us. It will give us less time to prepare, but it's... safer that way."

The Winter Solstice was the occasion that had brought me to the fae in the first place. How far I had come—from a strange human to a warrior queen preparing for a crowning ceremony. Then again, Brendan had been due to be crowned and branded during Imbolc one year, but in the end, he hadn't made it. There were no guarantees.

I tried to keep my expression blank. "And will the other courts come?"

"That I do not know. But their actions will speak loudly. We'll know who our allies are soon enough."

"And our enemies?"

He surveyed the room and frowned. "Our enemies will show their faces in time. Patience is all we have." He looked at me. "You need to designate advisers. You can't do everything yourself."

I nodded, suddenly exhausted. "But not today."

"Enjoy your evening, regent. It's been most telling."

I watched him leave. The conversation hadn't been so telling for me. In fact, it had left me more confused than ever.

The fae celebrated, but I was busy thinking of my next moves. I had to make contact with the other courts. I had to send Conn to the Miacha healers for help with the sick people in the other tower room. I had to... do _everything_.

Vix sat on the steps by my feet. "Your room is too small."

"It'll do."

"It's not very royal."

"Meh. As long as everyone who stays has a place to sleep, I don't care."

"This won't please everyone," she said.

"Nothing ever will."

She gazed up at me, and her mask of hate finally dropped. "You killed him in front of everyone. Even I couldn't quite believe it."

"I'm sorry."

"You don't apologise for taking what you deserve." Her eyebrows furrowed. "And _he_ was going to take it from you. The Silver King expected you to let him take it."

"Well, he made a mistake. I won't ever let anyone take this from my daughter. Not even her father."

Vix grinned, her black eyes shining. "That makes me happier than you know."

And I forced the feelings of doubt away in order to smile back.

# Chapter 2

I rubbed my temples as the nagging headache returned. "One week? Are you sure?"

The cook nodded. "We'll barely scrape by for one more week. Our supplies ran out rapidly, and Sadler did nothing to ration them."

I held in a weary sigh. I had been meeting with members of the court for the last three hours, and I was exhausted from taking stock of the casualties of Sadler's mismanagement. I had already sent out emissaries to find allies, spread the word of my takeover, and check on Deorad's secret stash of children, who were probably better off wherever they were hidden than here at court. But dealing with the problems at home took up a larger chunk of my time.

"How soon can we get people into the human realm?" I asked.

The fae looked at each other. Over a dozen of them sat around the table, most with a number of issues for me to deal with. My headache was increasing at a dramatic rate.

"We can use the same portal as before," Vix said. "We can steal from the humans, and—"

"No," I said sharply. "No stealing. That's done. Humans deserve to be treated with respect."

"Then what do we do?" she snapped. "How do we feed our people?"

I drummed my nails on the beautiful wooden table that had been delivered that morning. "I saw gold and jewels hidden in the tower. We can pay for the food we take. No, wait." I bit my lip, feeling excited. "Even better, we can buy land in the human realm and plant crops, raise animals—anything that will help us here."

"It takes time to sow seeds and wait for crops to be ready for harvest," the head gardener said.

"I know, but we'll be another step closer to self-sufficiency next year. We don't know if or when this taint will lift. We have to think ahead. We can't rely on stealing from humans to support a kingdom. I need to speak with the other kings."

"They can't be permitted to visit until the time of the ceremony," Rafe said. "It'll look as though they're trying to pull a coup if they arrive beforehand. Even if they do attend the ceremony."

"We must have something they need that we can trade, even if it's just our friendship."

"The darkness in the land has spread," said Thistle, a new arrival with intricate facial tattoos. "The entire realm will need help. They can't help us if they can't help themselves."

"Then we're back to making our own way." I frowned. "We need to set up a steady supply of food and other essentials. We need to buy land in the human realm. It wouldn't do any harm to find a secluded place there for Deorad's sick children to spend time healing. And we need to find land in the Darkside that's useful. Survival first. Then we can concentrate on other issues."

"There have been liveable patches of land," Thistle said. "But even those are rapidly disappearing."

"Send out scouts to find the full extent of the damage." I nodded at Thistle. "You can organise them. It's best we know how serious this is."

She beamed at my attention.

I tried to focus on what that needed to be done. "Okay. We're getting somewhere now. Cook, you're going to make lists of the things we need to survive for the next few months, at least."

"It'll be a long list," she said, looking exasperated.

"Then you had better get started." I looked to the gardener. "Can you be the one who looks for available land that we can use on the human side? Good, versatile land."

"I... of course." He removed his cap and rubbed his bald head. "But who will work the land? Many of us are wary of the human realm." He sat up straight. "Not me, though."

I thought about it. There was no point forcing people into situations they feared. They wouldn't work hard if they were afraid. "Volunteers. Give preference to those with corrupted children who could use a cleaner environment. If the taint is spreading still, they'll be better off away from the Darkside. We can pass on any medicine the Miacha send us and figure out a trade with them, too. We should take stock of everything we have, everything we can use, and everything we can trade."

"I'll be happy to organise that," Rafe said.

"It's a massive job. Some of you should help Rafe with that. I want to look through Sadler's things myself. Hang on—is Brighid's flower still growing in the garden?"

The gardener looked proud of himself. "Despite Sadler's best efforts, it survives, a lone flower amidst death. Our pride and joy."

"Good. Protect it, nourish it, make sure it keeps growing. If a rare goddess flower can grow in this soil, then that's a good sign."

"We will. If we grow a plant in the soil surrounding Brighid's flower, it doesn't die as quickly as in other places."

That made me wonder. "Have you heard of the First Tree?"

"A myth," the glaistig said immediately. "A legend."

I narrowed my eyes at the blood-drinking faery. "What's the legend? Tell me the story."

She pulled her feathers close. "I don't recall it."

My temper flared, but I controlled it. "Then you're of no use to me." I turned to Rumble. "I think it's time we saw what's been happening since we all left."

The castle looked even more run-down than when Sadler had controlled it. Every corner was full of dust and dirt. I had been woken the night before by the sound of a large stone falling from one of the derelict towers. But life outside the castle was worse.

There were as many tents as the last time I'd been there but not as many people. Some languished inside the tents, their bellies swollen and their eyes lined with red. The smell was terrible.

"Get them beds in the castle," I said to a maid who had been shadowing me. "All of them need to be inside. Get rid of the tents. Feed them. More food is coming, so don't worry about running out. Just be careful not to overfeed them. Ask the midwife to help."

Faeries swarmed me, begging for a blessing, mostly. "Queen Badb!" they cried. "The warrior queen will protect us."

I wasn't so sure.

Fiadh, Rat, and Vix stood away from the tents with my daughter. When the crowd saw Scarlet, they ran for her, almost trampling me. Rumble kept me on my feet.

Vix stood protectively in front of Scarlet, a dagger in each hand. "Come get me," she snarled. "If you dare."

That made the crowd hesitate. Vix apparently had a reputation.

"We want to see the child," someone shouted, but there was a meanness in her voice.

"The heir!" a male voice cried. "We want to touch the little heiress to the throne!"

"They'll rip her apart!" I pushed my way through the crowd. I reached a belligerent man as he lurched out to grab Scarlet. I gripped his collar, tripped him, then pinned him to the ground, my fenris-scarred dagger in my hand. The man was thin and sick looking, and I saw terror in his eyes. Ashamed, I let him go and moved toward Scarlet. People parted to make a path for me. But others in the crowd grew angry.

Donncha's soldiers marched into the fray and beat back the fae.

"Enough!" I shouted, finally reaching my daughter. "Donncha, no more violence."

"It's all they understand," he said, but he ordered his soldiers to step back. They circled us, ready to fight off the crowd again.

"We're hungry," a disgruntled voice said. "We want to eat."

"Food is being sent for," Rumble said in his steady, reassuring voice.

"I wasn't talking to the monster," the same person said, sneering at Rumble. "I'm talking to the consort."

A woman elbowed him in the eye. That kicked off a brawl that Donncha and his soldiers barely managed to settle.

"They're worthless if they behave like animals," Fiadh said. "Let them kill each other."

"No. But they're going to work for the food they receive. Everyone here will work." I raised my voice. "If you want to eat, you'll have to work for it. Go to Donncha, and tell him your skills. He'll point you in the right direction."

I turned on my heel and headed for the gardens with Rat and Scarlet, but my hands were shaking from the confrontation.

"What are you planning?" Vix asked, catching up to me. "What are you going to repair?"

"Anything I can," I whispered back. "The castle, the people, the land. The other courts might come for the ceremony. We want them to think we're coping. Even if we aren't."

"This isn't a game," she said, not unkindly.

"I know." I looked at her. "But we have to play anyway."

The head gardener came to greet us. "We've been waiting," he said anxiously. He led us into the garden.

I set Scarlet on her feet and held her hand. She giggled and tried to reach for Vix's dagger. Vix watched her indulgently.

"I swear to God, Vix: if you ever let her play with weapons, I will throw you in the river Garbh myself."

Her smile was lazy. "All little girls should know how to defend themselves."

I actually agreed with that. "Yeah, well, we just need to do it right."

"That was a decent enough move back there, by the way." She moved out of Scarlet's reach. "With my help, you could be good."

"Too bad. I was planning on being great."

She pursed her lips. "Let's not get crazy."

I gestured toward the castle. "Too late."

"But you're interested in being able to protect yourself."

"I can't rely on anyone else to save me."

"Then we have some work to do."

"Here she is," the gardener said proudly.

I tried not to sigh. The gardens were as I remembered, full of wilting plants and disappointing failures. Some of the Miacha's herbs were struggling to grow under the shadow of a withered tree that looked as though it were reaching for Brighid's flower. And even _that_ was sort of pathetic and not at all like the flowers I had seen in the Great Forest or at Brighid's grove. When I saw it there, looking puny, my heart sank. Nothing would grow. If we didn't find a way to feed ourselves, we were finished. I wondered what either of the other kings would have done in my position. They probably would have evacuated or maybe even destroyed the land as best they could.

I looked up and saw a crow circling overhead. "We should get indoors. I've seen enough out here."

Inside, Scarlet and I shared a meagre lunch of bread and cheese with Vix and Rumble. The sooner we set up a regular supply of food, the better.

"Well," Fiadh said. "You've seen a lot today. What do you think?"

"I'm thinking I should send Scarlet back to the human realm."

She looked horrified. "You can't! The people want her. They need her. If you let her go back, we're all lost."

"She's just a baby."

"And what of my own son? I came here for you and Scarlet. We're nothing without her. She's more than a symbol. She will breathe life into this place again. We can't afford to lose her."

I looked at my plate and felt sick again. "My hold on the throne is that tenuous?"

"It's too soon to answer that question," she said. "It will settle in time. After you prove yourself, you can do as you like. But for now, she must remain. The ceremony hasn't even occurred yet, and we can't afford to let either of the kings get their hands on her."

"They wouldn't take her from me."

"One of them is her father. Who's to say what he would or wouldn't do? You certainly had no idea he would offer to let Sadler live."

I couldn't deny that. Drake had been so intent on vengeance that I thought nothing would get in the way of that. I had been wrong. His lust for power had grown until it surpassed even his anger. I hadn't known him at all.

We spent the afternoon looking through Sadler's possessions—mostly junk, but there were some pieces of art that were old enough to hold a great deal of value. I checked in on the new occupants of his quarters.

"Any change?" I asked the midwife.

"Were you expecting some?"

"I don't know. Maybe? Everything else has changed."

"They won't survive."

"Why would he do this?" Tears filled my eyes as I looked at each of their faces. One girl looked so much like Drake that my heart threatened to stop.

"He wanted to survive, too. Do you blame him for that?"

I felt fierce and angry and upset. "Yes. I do."

"What would you do to survive?"

That shook me. "Not _this_. Let somebody know if you need anything else."

I left for the tower room that was full of forgotten treasures. Even though Sadler was dead, most of the fae still feared entering the tower rooms. I decided to take advantage of that.

Scarlet was napping, so I was accompanied by only Rumble, who rarely displayed fear. The mirror that had seemed to tell my fortune had been in that room. Maybe it would show me more if I saw it again, but it had a habit of disappearing. My friends didn't trust the mirror, but I was weighed down with the fear of the unknown. Even an unreliable clue was better than nothing.

"Has the mirror been back?" I asked when I stepped into the room.

"Nobody came here to check."

"Apart from Sadler."

He nodded. "But as they say, in the end, he locked himself away most of the time."

"Are they going to kill us?" I asked in a small voice. "Am I just fooling myself?"

"It's my job to make sure that nobody succeeds at that."

That was oddly reassuring. "What did you think when I killed him?"

"I felt... relief. And a sense of sadness."

I looked up at him. He was still wearing the helmet. I reached up and removed it. He flinched and almost turned his head away from me, but I made him look at me, scars and all. His face was destroyed. The only identifying features that remained were his full lips and soft brown eyes.

"He hurt you, and you still felt sad?"

"He was still my king and my blood, even if he refused to acknowledge it."

"So is Scarlet. She's your family now."

He looked at me with sympathy. "You say these words, but you know not their meaning."

I gave him a wry smile. "I didn't have much of a family in the human realm most of the time, so you might have a point. Come on, let's look through this stuff and see what we can keep and use."

"Bart is searching for Sadler's secret stashes. We'll have an inventory in a few days."

"Good." I knelt at a chest and ran my hand through the jewels within. "What a waste."

"Sadler had no need of riches."

I moved on to another chest. "Do you think madness is hereditary?"

"Perhaps," he said hesitantly.

"Maybe everyone here is mad." I sighed. "Especially me."

We opened all of the chests and found a fortune's worth of treasures we could use for trading. My nails were broken and my hair covered in dust when I spotted a long, slim box under a pile of junk.

"Look at this." A sword was inside the box. The helm was plain and the blade dull, but my hand hovered over it, unable to move on. "There's something about this one."

"It looks old and badly made. A bit too plain for a queen."

I smiled at him. "So, you agree I should use one?"

"You need a prettier sword than that because it'll remain an ornament so long as I'm around." He lifted the sword and whirled it in the air. "It's light, though. I can't tell what metal this is."

An odd feeling came over me. I wanted to snatch the sword right out of his hand. "I wonder where it came from."

"Perhaps... from another place."

"Like across the sea."

He put the sword down in a hurry. "Anything that comes from across the sea is cursed."

I smiled at his superstition and ran my hand over the blade. I had to keep it. "I saw the human realm across the sea. Does that count?"

"It should," he said with a hint of a smile.

"Rumble, you made a joke."

"Sort of."

We looked through the rest of the boxes and sacks as quickly as we could. By the time we were done, I was exhausted.

"Is there anything in particular you want to keep?" Rumble asked. "If not, I'll have the staff clear out the room and divide the items into those that can go into the treasury and those that are worthless."

I picked up the old jewellery box I had found the magical wooden weapon in so long ago. "I'll keep this. And I want to keep that sword. At least for now. I might get it cleaned up and give it to someone as a gift someday."

He looked at me. "A king someone?"

"Is that so bad?"

"No. It's smart. With three kingdoms, it will always be two against one. Ensure you're one of the two, and everything will work."

"We're not much of a kingdom." I used my forearm to wipe a cobweb from my cheek. "We've no food. The people are dying. The land is dying. We have the smallest army of all three."

"Have faith," he said. "As much faith as we've put in you."

I clasped the sword, and my confidence grew. I might not be the warrior queen they hoped for, but I had always been a survivor.

The entire court had been put to work. Sneezing was a constant sound as dust rose in the air. We were clearing out the old, preparing to welcome the new. Plans to pass through the human portal had already been established, and Donncha, the cook, and the gardener all had new volunteers. Most of the nobles quietly sneered, but some of them, including Fiadh, rolled up their sleeves and pitched in with everyone else. We were desperate for beds, and most of the court had to sleep on blankets on the floor, but at least they were inside.

There had been a number of violent spats since my arrival, which worried me. Was it Sadler's or the taint's influence, or was it just the true nature of my subjects? Worse, had my act of violence encouraged theirs?

I missed finding time to be alone. In my small room, Rat liked to fall asleep on the floor next to Scarlet, who had been acting as though she'd always lived in the castle. By the door, the blond warrior Orlaith kept watch in a comfortable chair until I ordered her to rest. Donncha himself had assigned her as my bodyguard.

As for me, I lay in bed at night trying to decide what kind of person I wanted to be and what kind of person the court needed me to be. I had to be ten steps ahead of everyone else, ready for when the fae would turn on me. Because the signs were there. Not everyone was happy with the new regent.

I wasn't a stranger to history. I knew how fickle people could be. How many queens in the human realm had been loved by their people only to end up beheaded? That couldn't happen to me. At least, not until Scarlet was old enough to take care of herself.

One night, after Orlaith had fallen asleep, I found myself wide-awake and anxious after a looping dream of whispered words and never-ending mazes. I slipped out of bed and snuck back up to the tower room. Most of the boxes of treasure and weapons had already been taken downstairs to be accounted for. The room was mostly empty, and it had been scrubbed well. And in the centre, back where it had been before Scarlet was born, stood a tall mirror framed in gold.

I held my breath as I approached, almost reaching out to touch it before remembering myself. The last time I'd touched it, it had seemed to steal a piece of my soul. This was the room it hid in, the room Sadler had visited on who knew how many nights, just to see one image in the reflection. The reflection had shown me married to him, and he'd gone out of his way to make that a reality.

I circled the mirror, wondering how it moved, how it reappeared then disappeared again. Where did it go when it was gone? I stood in front of the glass and studied myself. In the reflection, my black hair was shorter, but I looked almost the same. I rolled up my sleeves to see the likeness of the black veins in the crook of my arm. I watched in the mirror as the blackness spread across my arms and hands, creeping up my neck until it violated my face. My eyes darkened, growing hardened and cruel. My own dagger appeared in one hand, but it was stained with fresh blood. The blood dripped to the ground, and I heard it fall. I looked down at my arms in a panic but only saw the black veins on my inner elbow. But there was a puddle of blood on the floor next to me, and I had no idea how it had gotten there.

I was stepping backward when I heard a whisper in my head. The mirror had called my name. I took one last look and saw a bloodied crown perched on my head. Freaked out, I fled back toward my room. Bart was in one of the hallways. He gave me a knowing smile and waved his hand. I stared at him until he turned and walked away.

Back in my room, I couldn't sleep. The mirror was a terrifying reminder of the possibilities. I double-checked my arm but saw no change. I was still the same Cara. Except I wasn't. I was a queen now.

Out the window, a movement drew my attention. Small black spots shifted on the horizon. More dots materialised. I frowned, peering outward to see what it was. In the dusk, three crows appeared. They flew directly toward my window. I faced them, waiting, until they flew right over my head. They dropped tiny scrolls of parchment onto the floor then flew outside again. They were gone before I could look twice. I picked up one of the scrolls and unrolled it.

Orlaith jumped, suddenly alert. "What is it?" she asked, breathless.

"A list of names," I said. There were six unfamiliar names, and at the very end of the parchment were written the words, "Our lives are in your hands."

That strange feeling passed over me again, as though my skin were prickling under a sharp breeze. I shoved the scroll at Orlaith and picked up another. More names.

"Fealty," she said in an awed voice. "These are important houses, my lady. And they swear fealty to you."

I read the names until I learned them by heart. The fae were always watching, and some of them thought I was _worth_ watching.

To my surprise, I slept well that night.

# Chapter 3

I felt a massive sense of satisfaction as a group of muscular fae dragged the stone thrones out of the castle. I thought, _Take_ that _, Sadler_.

The castle was full of noise: shouts, arguments, banging, water splashing, and best of all, laughter. I had rolled up my sleeves and cleared out my own room before helping the midwife with Sadler's. The rest of the Chaos Court was busy cleaning and building and repairing and cooking and preparing for the ceremony. A large delivery of food had arrived that morning, and everyone in the court was in high spirits.

"We can break down the thrones and reuse the stone," said Marron, a fae with wings the colour of mud. His black hair marked him as one of Deorad's children, but he was more outspoken than most of them. He observed the removal of the thrones with keen eyes. "But we won't have enough material or bodies to finish the work before the ceremony."

"That's fine," I said. "We'll do what we can. We're not trying to impress anyone else. It's just for us."

He gave me an odd look. "Well, I should get back to it. The carpenter and the seamstress will have the new thrones ready."

I nodded as he left me. Rat was sitting in the centre of the great hall with Scarlet, Setanta, and a number of small, tainted children who had come with some new arrivals. They were well enough to work, but I wanted them to have some fun instead. The fae didn't approve, and I didn't care. Those of Deorad's offspring young enough to need caregivers were still far from the castle, but one day, they would likely return, and I wanted the fae to be used to children before then.

I wiped my fringe away from my face and wondered what the kings were up to. I had sent Sadler's twin emissaries to personally invite them to the ceremony, but there had been no reply as yet. I tried not to worry. It had been two weeks since I'd taken over the castle, and I hadn't heard from anyone outside. Food was being brought in from the human realm, so that was one issue I didn't have to worry about... until the gold ran out. I froze. We were using a portal into the human realm for food, so why couldn't I go see Zoe and my grandparents?

I practically skidded across the floor to reach Vix, who was watching over the children with a grim expression. She hated being the bodyguard of children.

"I have an idea," I said. "And I'm going to need your help."

"Unless I get to kill something, I'm not interested."

"Did I make a request?"

She grinned and looked me in the eye. "What are your orders?"

"I need to take Scarlet into the human realm for a few hours."

Her expression shifted immediately. "Are you crazy?" she huffed under her breath. "We can't leave the castle. You could be assassinated or seen as a runaway, or the kings could come here in your absence."

"Oh. And I always thought you were the sneaky one."

She pressed her lips together. "Fine. But we do it my way. Where are we going?"

I hesitated. "Home."

"This is a stupid idea. A stupid, stupid idea." She smiled again. "Let me fetch Rumble." She made arrangements with Rumble while I picked up Scarlet.

"I wasn't finished with my story," Rat said.

"She needs a nap. I'll watch over her—don't worry. Finish your story, then get some rest. I'll send for you when I need you."

She nodded and carried on with the story. As I left the hall, I felt eyes on my back. I looked over my shoulder and noticed Fiadh watching. I gave her a smile and went on my way. Rumble and Vix quickly followed.

"This is a bad idea," Rumble said.

"So I'm told. Now, let's go."

Rumble looked far too large for my grandparents' home. I hadn't realised just how tall he was in the high-ceilinged rooms of a castle, but in a two-bedroom semi-detached, the height thing was definitely noticeable. Gran kept giving him odd looks, probably because of the helmet. Then again, Vix was wearing her usual skin-tight black-leather clothing, I was covered in dust and grime, and Scarlet wore a ridiculous and pristine baby gown that Rat had gone gaga over, so we weren't exactly what anyone expected.

"Zoe's on her way." Granddad reached out to squeeze Scarlet's hand. "Your baby has grown so much."

"She hasn't forgotten this place anyway," I said as Scarlet headed straight for the toy box in the corner. "I'm sorry I haven't been back. It's been... crazy."

"Zoe told us some things," Gran said.

"This is Vix and Rumble, by the way. They're Scarlet's aunt and uncle through blood."

"We don't claim the same ancestry," Vix said. "We are the nameless, and she is a princess."

My grandparents exchanged bewildered glances.

I rolled my eyes. "Don't listen to her. She's always in a bad mood."

Vix snorted softly. An awkward silence ensued.

"Your mother's been asking for you," Gran said after a while. "She visits us every now and then."

"Have you had any trouble since we left?" I wasn't sure what to think about my mother, so I put the topic of her aside yet again.

"No trouble." Granddad hazarded a glance at Rumble, who seemed to be growing by the second by the way he was filling up the room. "I take it you're safe."

"Of course," I lied.

When Zoe and Líle arrived twenty minutes later, I almost collapsed with relief.

"You're both here," I said, hugging them. "You're both okay."

Zoe smiled, but she was still a little pale. When she had gone to the faery realm, she had almost lost her mind. She could never go back.

"Have you heard anything?" I asked as we all sat down. Vix and Rumble refused to sit.

"Very little," Líle said. "And I dare not believe the rumours."

"Rumours?" I said, stalling.

"Cara, just tell us what happened," Zoe said. "Your version."

I met my grandfather's gaze. "You're not going to like it."

"We're on your side, Cara," he said.

I pulled my knees up to my chest, feeling more vulnerable and human than I had in weeks. In the faery realm, I had been congratulated for my actions by most fae, while others were merely disappointed that I had taken away their chance of power. Nobody was sad or angry that I had taken a life. And in the real world, the one I was supposed to belong in, there was no context for my actions. I was a murderer. Therefore, I deserved to be punished. There was no way to sugarcoat it for humans who had rules I couldn't obey if I wanted to survive the faery realm. And there I went, making excuses again. It was time to be honest with my grandparents... and myself.

"I killed Sadler," I said in a small voice. "And I kind of... took over the Chaos Court." I felt their gazes on me and shivered. "It wasn't like I planned it. Not really. It just sort of... happened."

"It was an accident," Gran said hopefully. "You didn't mean it."

I curled my fingers into fists. "Gran, I meant it."

" _They_ wanted you to kill him," Zoe said in an angry tone. "Did they make you do this?"

I finally risked looking at her. Two pinpricks of red dotted her cheeks. "They didn't make me, Zo. Drake was going to spare Sadler and take the Darkside into his territories. But I... I got in the way and changed everything."

"Drake?" Líle asked, incredulous. "He was going to let Sadler live after everything he said and did?"

"He wanted power," Vix said bitterly. "All men are swayed by power."

"He doesn't care about the Darksiders," I said pleadingly, hoping my human family would understand. Líle would get it—I was sure of that—but the others lived by different rules.

"He wanted to kill them all," Zoe said thoughtfully. "I remember that. He was angry, and he was happy to take it out on innocent people. And you stopped him. How?"

I covered my burning cheeks. "I... threatened him with the same knife I used to kill Sadler. And the Darksiders kind of got a kick out of that."

Gran reached for my grandfather's hand. I hated causing them pain, but none of us were perfect, and they deserved to know the truth about me.

"Well, it was the child, too," Vix said when the room filled with silence. "The child with a warrior queen for a mother."

I scowled at her mocking tone. "They wanted an heir, and I was there with Scarlet, and they just... let me in. It was easy in the end. And the ships disappeared. I've no idea if they'll stay gone. Sadler's deal was broken when he died. But the people he was using to keep himself alive haven't woken up yet. The midwife thinks they're dying. I'm just hoping the Miacha come through for us in time."

"How did you get here?" Gran asked.

"We have no food, so we set up a path between the realms so we can buy what we need. We snuck away through the same path today."

"I don't understand," Granddad said. "What does any of this even mean? Are you coming home?"

"No," I said softly. "I can't come home. Not now. They need me. I'm... their queen now."

"But you're just..." Gran shook her head. "I was going to call you a child. You're anything but a child."

"Because I'm considered a serial killer in the human realm?" Sadler hadn't been my first victim.

A gasp escaped her lips. She couldn't look at me then, and I felt a twinge of regret for shocking her. It was so much easier to judge myself—and forget the brutality of the courts—when I was safe in the human realm. Away from the faery realm, it was harder for me to justify the things I'd done. But I was already on this path. I couldn't veer off, or all would be lost.

"Scarlet is our princess," Vix said huffily. "Cara couldn't leave with her even if she wanted to."

A shiver ran down my spine. That was too true. "Somebody needs to take charge, and I've survived, so it's me."

"You're a queen," Granddad said slowly. "In the faery realm. This is madness, Cara." But he laughed, and that set me off into nervous giggles.

"I know. It's crazy. But that's how things stand. There's going to be an official ceremony soon. I would invite you, but... it's too dangerous. For all of us. I can't have people I care about around me because they'll just be at risk. Scarlet's in so much demand that she's safe."

"Are _you_ safe?" Granddad asked.

"It doesn't matter as long as Scarlet is," I said firmly.

"You can't stay there forever," Gran said. "Not forever."

"I'm going to ride out this storm and figure out what to do from there," I lied. I couldn't imagine returning to the human realm for good and losing all of the magic and madness forever. Even sitting in that little house, I ached to go back. It would feel like going home.

"You would leave?" Vix began in a huff.

"Vix," Rumble said warningly. "Enough."

Vix glared at me.

"I'm not planning anything either way," I said. "We don't know what's going to happen."

We stuck to safer subjects after that.

"What happened when you left?" I asked Zoe.

"I don't remember much," she said.

"She had another episode on the way," Líle explained. "She was delirious. When we came back to the human realm, she calmed. We took her here because... well, questions."

"Yeah, I get that," I said. "No episodes since?"

Zoe shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. "Nightmares sometimes. Are you leaving Scarlet with us?"

I shook my head. "I can't. It's too dangerous to do that right now."

"It's a pity she can't have the best of both worlds," Zoe said.

I sank deeper into the chair. "Maybe someday."

"I'm going to return to the faery realm. I'll join you in the Dark Court as soon as I tie things up here," Líle said. "I should have come already, but..." She glanced at Zoe. "I swore to protect Scarlet, and I will continue to do that."

"You swore to do that while you ran with her. That's over now."

"It's just beginning," Líle said. "You need people you can trust around you."

I ran my hands over my face. "I don't know. It could be risky. For you, I mean. You've worked for both kings. People could get the wrong idea about you now."

"Let them." Her eyes sparked and glistened with fire, and a knot I hadn't realised was still in my chest loosened a little. I needed a familiar face in the Darkside.

"Are you sure?" I whispered.

She reached out and squeezed my shoulder. "I made an oath of my own. You may not realise it, Cara, but the promise you persuaded me to make saved my life. I know how things work in the Silver Court. You need all the friends you can get."

"They'll call her a spy," Vix said loudly.

"It's none of your business." Rumble nodded at Líle. "They'll see you protecting the child. That will be enough for them."

Zoe squeezed my hand. "I can't say I wish I was going back there, but I do wish you could stay here. Don't leave it so long next time. Come back to me, okay?"

I wrapped my arms around her and relished the contact. Zoe was human and full of love. There were no agendas. She cared about me and Scarlet, no matter what I did. "I'm sorry about everything. You will always be my best friend, Zo. You'll always be..." I hiccupped a sob.

Zoe held me tighter. "I know. I'm sorry if I sounded like I was judging you in the faery realm. I never got the chance to tell you that. I just worry about you, but it was never my business. I shouldn't have made you feel guilty for doing the best you could in the circumstances. You're right. It's a different world, and you have to do different things to survive."

"No, you were right." I pulled back and wiped a tear. "You know me better than anyone. I'm too much of a coward to ever put my trust in..." I squeezed my eyes shut. "It doesn't matter anymore. I'm just glad you're safe."

She held my face in her hands, her blue eyes glistening with tears of her own. "Don't forget who you are," she whispered. "Remember how far you've come by being yourself. Don't let them believe you have to be cruel. Don't forget to feel."

"But the mirror, Zoe."

"Fuck the mirror! It showed you an image, but maybe it was a metaphor. Maybe it showed how you'll end up if you keep blocking off your feelings. Maybe what you saw is just a possibility of how you could end up on the inside when you don't let yourself feel."

I pressed my face against her shoulder, trying not to fall apart completely. She would always know what to say to make me feel better. She would always anchor me to a world that was real. I needed that for Scarlet, too. I had to find a way.

"We need to get back," Vix said.

I knew she was right. We said our goodbyes, and I tried to control my sudden homesickness.

"I'll check the perimeter before we leave," Rumble said.

I nodded and turned away from my grandparents to wipe my eyes. When I cleared my vision, I saw Vix staring at me. "What?" I asked.

"It's just that—"

The clash of swords drew our attention. "Líle, stay here," I cried as Vix and I ran outside. And then I stopped short in surprise.

Rumble was wielding his sword against a familiar faery king on my grandparents' grass.

"What the hell is going on?" I demanded. But both men were too concerned with attempting to lop each other's heads off to pay any attention to me. Brendan's red-gold hair shone as he whirled around Rumble, faster than my bodyguard but not as bulky. With alleged giant's blood in his heritage, Brendan was taller than every man I knew, barring Rumble, and they appeared to be a good match.

Vix yawned and leaned against the wall. "I wouldn't have run so fast if I'd known it was _him_."

"Vix, help me stop them!"

"Why?"

Brendan jumped into a somersault and landed in a crouch, avoiding the swinging of Rumble's sword. Both men were large, but Rumble was broader. Brendan spun and swung, but Rumble parried.

"Stop it!" I called out.

"They'll get bored eventually," Vix said, sounding uninterested.

But Brendan's eyes were gleaming with bloodlust, and Rumble wasn't holding back. The fight continued for less than a minute. Then Rumble drew blood, and that provoked an intensified reaction from Brendan. I watched in awe as he moved faster than I had ever seen. There was something raw and frenzied about it all.

"You're enjoying this," Vix said in disgust.

I glanced at her long enough to show my disapproval. By then, Brendan was swinging harder, faster, and more aggressively than before. Rumble parried again, and they struggled, pushing sword against sword.

"That's enough!" I shouted, getting too close to them.

Rumble knocked Brendan's arm, and his sword came close to my chest, slicing a tiny slit in the fabric. I gasped in alarm, feeling every nerve ending go on alert. My skin prickled at the sensation.

Rumble disarmed Brendan, but the king pounded the top of Rumble's helmet. It cracked, and Rumble stumbled backward.

Brendan ignored him and searched me for injuries. "Did I cut you?"

With a huff of frustration, I shoved him away. "You big bully! Leave him alone."

" _Him_?" Brendan gestured at his bleeding arm. "The lunatic cut me."

"He defended his queen. You're lucky you still breathe." Vix spoke lazily, but one look at her told me she was cowed.

"Why are you here?" I asked. "Why are you fighting my bodyguard?"

"He's your bodyguard?" Brendan looked Rumble up and down. "Humph. A good choice." He settled his gaze on me then, and I got caught up in memories of events that felt as though they had occurred a century ago. "I told you I would protect your family. Someone is always watching. When I heard you were here, I thought I would... make sure nothing was wrong."

"I'm not running away, if that's what you thought," I said. "I just wanted to make sure everyone was okay here."

"The child is here."

I shrugged. "We snuck out."

"You're someone else's problem now. I had almost forgotten." His eyes narrowed, that bloodlust still firing. I had to calm him down if I wanted to talk to him properly.

I turned to look at the others. "Give me a minute, please. Inside. I'll be fine."

Rumble hesitated for only a second before shoving Vix toward the door. When they were inside, I turned to Brendan.

"I thought... I don't know. I thought I'd have heard from you," I said, trying to hold his gaze.

His green eyes roamed my face. "And I thought we'd said all we had to say. In my court, I've been busy dealing with the aftermath of your little display with Sadler. What you did actually affects my people, Cara, and you put a dent in their faith in me."

"I'm _sorry_!"

He looked startled. "I'm usually the one apologising."

"I didn't plan the way it went down. I didn't plan on being a queen or regent or whatever the hell it is I am now."

He ran his hands through his hair. "You didn't trust me to protect you."

"You _told_ me not to trust you. You warned me I was forgettable, that you would never want to keep me."

"I said that when—"

"It doesn't matter! I can't take that risk for Scarlet. I can't. I have to know she's safe, and the only way I can do that is to give myself an advantage in the faery realm."

"This obsession has clouded your already-selective memory," he said, frowning. "You remember the bad and never the good."

Obsession. That had always been my problem. I latched on to ideas that I thought would fix problems, make me happy, and change the world around me. I always aimed for goals that were out of my reach. Even my human friends used to joke about "Cara's latest obsession." I had been obsessed with Drake making things right, and lately couldn't stop thinking about Scarlet's safety. Brendan was right. He had given me more reasons to trust him than not, but I hadn't been brave enough to rely on him. More than that, I was terrified of being hurt by him because that would mean losing him.

"Drake would have been more powerful than you," I said, panicking. I had seen in a strangely quick flash that I didn't want Brendan to hate me. Ever. And his mood had clearly soured since I'd seen him. "He would have used that."

"You're angry with him," he said slowly. "That's understandable."

"What? That's not it! Didn't you hear him?" I seethed with anger at the memory of Drake offering to spare Sadler. "He would have taken it all, just to be more powerful than you. That was more important to him than even killing Sadler."

"He claims it was a trick to force Sadler to end his deals peacefully with this god. In fact, he says that you ruined his plan to the extent that you may have cursed us all."

My hands shook. Had I made a mistake? "No, he... no! I saw it in his eyes. He would have killed for that power. He would have done whatever it took, including saving the man who would have turned him against you."

"Don't pretend this act was all for me. Don't play with me like that. Not again."

And then I realised: he thought the feelings I had projected when I kissed him had been a lie.

"If you imagine I wasn't thinking about you when..." I touched his arm, and he winced. "I forgot you were hurt," I said, losing track of my argument. "Can I help?"

"I'll survive." He gripped my arms. "But will you?"

I relaxed at his touch. "I'm trying to."

"Look at you—always able to tell us what we need to hear." His sudden laugh was harsh. "Always the survivor."

"It's not my fault. I didn't want any of this, Brendan, and you know that."

"I bring a powerless human into my home who not only has a child by one king but marries and murders another and then steals his throne. Do you truly believe anyone suspects that this was not your plan all along?"

"Sadler _forced_ me. You know what he did to me. How can you talk like I wanted any of that to happen?"

His expression remained hard. "Does it matter? Do you think my court will ever trust you now? The great manipulator. From nothing to a queen. How she must laugh at the Green king's naivety."

"Brendan, stop this. Stop acting like we're not friends."

He let out a sharp breath. " _Friends_. Is that what we are, Cara?"

"You know the truth." I took his hands. "You know who I am in the ways that count. And I know who you are."

"Do I? Do I know who any of you really are underneath?" He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Or am I just outmanoeuvred by a..." He shrugged off my touch. "I hope you don't get yourself killed, Cara. I really do."

A lone tear rolled down my cheek as I felt another friend slip through my fingers.

He brushed it away from my cheek without hesitation, but he dropped his hand just as quickly. A sharp pain shot through my chest. I had experienced an instant attraction to Drake, but Brendan and I had developed what I thought might be a true friendship. And then I had ruined it.

But I couldn't let go so easily. "Please come to the ceremony. Please be there for me, Brendan."

"Goodbye," he whispered. He turned to walk away.

"I miss _you_ ," I called out after him.

He hesitated for just a second, and then he was gone.

# Chapter 4

The androgynous twin emissaries, Caellan and Fallon, returned to court and were met with a different kind of chaos. They looked bewildered as they were invited to join me at a table. The new thrones weren't finished yet, and I didn't see the point of looking down on people anyway—I had decided sitting across from people at a table was a better way to deal with the crowds.

Almost identical, the fae before me were slight and slender with a rich cocoa colouring to their skin. I wasn't sure if I could trust them, but before Grim knew who they were, he had remarked on how good they were at their jobs. For now, that was enough for me.

"We did as you said," Caellan, the one with the mole under his left ear, announced. "We separated and personally invited the kings and their trusted subjects to the ceremony."

"And the daoine sídhe?"

"She's in the Silver Court with her daughter. She accepted the invitation."

"Okay, tell me what happened when you approached the kings. Green Court first."

Fallon's shimmering wings twitched. "I was the one who met with the Green King. He saw me in his study, as a matter of fact."

"And who was with him?"

Fallon arched a brow before answering. "A brownie and the bodyguard-turned-general. I heard rumours that they are his trusted pair and that he will see nobody without them."

I resisted the urge to bite my fingernails. "So, what did he say?"

"I gave my speech, and he graciously listened. He then thanked me, and bade me to thank you, for the invitation."

"But did he say yes? Is he coming?"

Fallon hesitated. "He said he would send his reply in due course."

"He didn't say no."

"He didn't say yes, either."

"What does that mean?" I asked, frustrated.

"I assumed he wished to assess the risk with his trusted advisers."

I nodded as though I weren't disheartened. "That makes sense. How were you received?"

"Very well. I was fed and given a room for the night. It was more than adequate. I met up with my brother the following morning."

"How did the court itself react to you?"

He inhaled deeply. "They were neither rude nor friendly."

"How was the Silver Court?"

"A strange experience," Caellan said. "I was received in a large hall in what was once the Unseelie castle. The king and queen do not sit close to each other. Some subjects go to the king. Others plead to the queen. She sits with the leanan sídhe while the king sits with the daoine sídhe. The court, including the leanan sídhe, openly mocked me."

I groaned at my ancestor's rudeness. "I'm so sorry. Donella's a megabitch."

"Er... quite. The queen was embarrassed. The king sat very quietly until I finished my speech. He told me he would attend the ceremony. And then he picked one of his own subjects out to be made an example of."

"An example?"

"For mocking me, my lady. He killed him in front of me, and for the first time, the queen moved to his side to join him. It was... ceremonial. They offered their own subject up as a sacrifice to their god."

"Sacrifices," I whispered. When we first met, Drake risked his life to spare me from being sacrificed. How could he have changed so much? And I had been horrified by death. Now I caused it. How far I had lowered myself with the fae?

"I must admit, even though I was used to a king like Sadler, I found the process unsettling. The man suffered. The queen left the hall after that, and I was forced to remain until the day at court was over. I was given a place at the king's table and a bed in the servants' quarters and then sent on my way."

I frowned. "What do _you_ make of it?"

"There are power struggles within the Silver Court," he said hesitantly. "It is hard to predict the king's intentions."

"He might not come?"

He shrugged. "I do not know. He may send a representative in his place. The daoine sídhe sent her well wishes to you and the lady Fiadh."

We were interrupted by a number of crows whooshing into the hall. The fae chattered excitedly as a pile of scrolls was dropped at my feet.

"Fealty." Caellan sounded surprised.

I nodded grimly then picked up one of the scrolls. I read aloud from each of the documents. A number of fae cheered when they heard the names.

"Good families," Fallon said. "And more will come."

"Why?" I asked. "Why are they choosing us now?"

"Perhaps the tribesmen you dispatched are more diplomatic than my brother and I thought," Fallon said. "But I would guess the child is the draw."

I glanced over at my daughter. So much was being placed on her shoulders without her knowing it. "I'm going to select advisers today," I said. "Any suggestions?"

"Take some of the old bloodlines," Caellan said. "And at least one from the new families."

"What about Rafe?"

They exchanged an indecipherable look. "Rafe would be an excellent choice," Fallon said. "I would also suggest a warrior or a scholar to round out the depth of experience."

"And a pair of emissaries?" I smiled at their reaction. "Go. Eat and freshen up. We have a lot to do still."

They hesitated. "You have been busy in our absence."

I relaxed as I thought of the progress we had made. "There's no point sitting still."

"We have other news." Fallon's expression grew grim. "It is not our news, but it's news all the same."

"What is it?"

"The darkness that's killing our soil and our people has spread virulently into neutral territory and beyond. As we passed through the Great Forest, we saw many ancient trees withering. Death will come soon."

"Unless somebody does something," I murmured.

"Even if we knew how to stall the spread, the damage has already been done." He gazed at me with serious eyes. "The realm may never recover from this."

"Then we'll have to hurry up and fix it," I said, and I bade the next person to approach.

Scarlet toddled around the room, clutching a stuffed rabbit Zoe had given her, similar to one I had owned as a child. Bekind was inconveniently absent, as she had been for days. I was still staring at the clothes in my wardrobe, wondering what a queen wore when she met her new advisers for the first time. I barely knew most of them, and I worried the meeting wouldn't go well. I had grand ideas of the court becoming some kind of democracy, but that might be a step too far for the Dark Court right then.

"Come on, butterfly," I whispered. "We need to get ready. We've a big day ahead of us."

Scarlet looked at me and gave a smile devoid of cunning or cruelty. I knew I had to do whatever it took to preserve her innocence.

Fiadh had organised an official meeting room for us. The large oak table in the centre of the room was surrounded by comfortable chairs. The stone walls were covered in dark tapestries that had been retrieved from Sadler's stash of goodies. Shelves were stuffed full of books I had never seen. A display cabinet of oddities nestled in the corner of the warm-toned room, and an area for Scarlet to play in waited on the far side.

I traced my fingers along a Celtic symbol of four linked circles embedded in the table. "The round table," I whispered.

"The first of my name built it by hand many generations ago," Fiadh said. "It's beautiful, is it not?"

"Not that I'm not grateful, but why did you bring it here?"

"When Sadler encroached, my grandfather sent some family heirlooms away in case they were damaged. I simply took them back once I felt safe again. And that was when you took this court for yourself." She cocked her head. "Besides, we don't need the other courts to see us as their poor relatives. Many a war council has met around this table. We should start as we mean to go on—at the top of the food chain."

As I was about to protest, the advisers began to arrive. After taking a seat as directed, most gave surprised looks at the children playing in the corner of the room, but nobody commented.

I slipped into my seat and took a good look at those around me. Fiadh had helped, but ultimately, I had used my instincts when deciding whom to invite. Surrounding me were the twin emissaries, Caellan and Fallon—the obvious diplomatic choices—Donncha, who was in control of the army, and Rafe, who was amazingly skilled at managing logistics. Also present were Thistle—who took charge of our husbandry, farming, and household needs—and an ancient-looking scribe called Levin, master of lore and education, as well as Marron, who had innovative ideas about rebuilding the realm. And finally, there were Fiadh, who knew a lot about the noble families, and Bart, an odd character whom I wanted to understand. Truthfully, I took Bekind—whenever she showed herself—Rumble, and Vix as my own personal advisers, while the others were the kingdom's advisers.

"You're all here because you bring a unique perspective," I said. "You've seen this court, and this realm, from different levels. If we're going to be able to support and defend ourselves, then we'll need to consider every angle. We can _not_ afford a war, and we need to deal with the blight—because that's exactly what it is. This blight is spreading rapidly." I nodded at the emissaries. "Tell them what you saw."

Caellan nodded. "On our way to deliver messages to the other courts and potential allies, the land looked to be in a grave state."

Fallon added, "And on our returning journey, matters had already deteriorated further. The land is withering away, not only in our territory but in others as well. Something has happened to speed up the process."

"What can we do about this?" Rafe asked.

"When the other courts come to us for the ceremony, I'll ask the kings for their help in ending the spread. Someone in the realm must know what we should do."

"And if they don't?" Marron asked.

"Then there won't be a realm for much longer." I rapped my nails on the table. "And we'll have to move elsewhere."

"If this spread is truly quickening, there may not be anywhere else to go," Levin said.

"Then that stays in this room until we know more," I said. "But Levin, try to look into the old volumes of books we found. There might be records of similar cases in the past."

"I will," he promised.

"And when the other courts arrive, we need to present ourselves well. They can't know how weak we are."

"Do you suspect an attack?" Donncha asked.

I frowned. "A king would need to be sly about taking over this realm. But that's not my biggest concern right now. The doctor is dead. Sadler is dead. The ships are gone. But what if they reappear? We need to be prepared for anything."

"That can wait until after the ceremony," Bart said. "The sooner you are officially sworn in, the better. We can't brand you as a royal, but naming you regent is the next best thing. Your daughter will be part of the ceremony, of course." He glanced over at Scarlet, and his eyes narrowed. "So keep her well, my lady."

A representative of the Silver Court arrived with a gift of two young hounds. "They will guard you and your daughter." The unfamiliar fae bowed low. "And my court will be only too glad to come to the celebrations. We thank you for the invitation."

I nodded. "Of course." The pups were shaggy and wolflike. The black dog had piercing blue eyes while the smaller snow-white bitch had black eyes and a black patch of fur around one eye.

Drake's emissary lifted the pups in the air by the scruff of their necks. "They are a breeding pair. They will soon be large and fast—good hunters."

"And safe around children?"

"They are bred for protection. They will be fiercely protective of those who care for them."

I wondered if Drake assumed Scarlet and I would be the only ones capable of truly caring for the dogs.

The emissary brought the pups to my lap and knelt at my feet as I snuggled them. He lowered his voice. "The king in particular wonders if you need assistance by way of soldiers."

"Does he now?" I murmured. I raised my voice. "Tell your king that I thank him for the gifts. And your queen also, of course."

"Of course. I should tell you that we travelled far to find these pups. Their offspring will be very valuable and useful. Our king would like you to know that he would appreciate the opportunity to purchase a dog from the first litter."

"Of course. They _are_ beautiful." I waved a servant over to me. "Take the emissary to his quarters. He is our guest. Ensure that he has whatever he needs."

The emissary bowed again and followed the servant, leaving me with the puppies.

"What the hell do I do with these?" I asked, laughing, as the pups fought on my lap.

Some of my advisers crowded around me to take a closer look.

"This is an extravagant gift," Levin said. "A sign of great favour."

"A pair of dogs?" I asked.

Rafe gingerly lifted the black pup's ear until the animal snapped playfully at his fingers. "This is a cú sídhe. It's... very valuable."

"I've never heard of a white one before." Thistle frowned at the second pup. "It's a beauty, but a white cú sídhe?"

"It's defective then," Fiadh said crossly. "An insult. This is no breeding pair."

"No," I said softly. The patch of black hair on white reminded me of my daughter's pale patch through her dark hair. "It's not an insult at all. So, you've never seen a white one of these?"

They all looked at each other. "I've never seen a black one either," Fiadh said with a smile.

"Are they rare?" I asked.

"Something like that." Thistle knelt and stared at the white dog in the eyes until it growled at her. "They've been gone for a very long time."

"The emissary spoke truly." Rumble lifted the dogs out of my lap. "According to the tales, they will protect and hunt, and on the battlefield, they will make any warrior think twice. This is a good gift."

Levin let out a startlingly high-pitched laugh. "The Silver Court favours you still."

"Even though I stole the Darkside?" I murmured.

"Perhaps especially because of that," Thistle said with a mischievous grin. "Who wouldn't respect such an act?"

My cheeks burned. "I've never owned a dog before. How do I train them?"

"You don't train a cú sídhe," Rafe said, and the others laughed as though it were a great joke. "But you need never worry about an enemy sneaking up on you. This dog is mostly silent, but when a fully grown cú sídhe howls, the people of the world will feel the ground tremble beneath them."

"Don't exaggerate," I said with a smile. "Come on then, faery dogs. Let's go see what the children think of you. And try not to pee on me."

The white dog yelped as though it understood me, and I bit my lip as the others looked at the animals in wonder.

The children were in the garden with Rat and Vix. Conn still hadn't returned on Dubh, which made me nervous. Rumble carried the pups outside while I walked alongside Fiadh.

"What's the significance behind the gift?" I asked.

"That Scarlet's safety is important," Fiadh said. "And there is a concern from the Silver Court in that regard. I do wonder how they managed to get their hands on these pups. A breeding pair means they came from different bloodlines."

"Are they really so special?"

"Legend says."

We reached the children, who were digging in the dirt in their very own patch of garden. No plants would grow there, but at least it was an excuse for them to get out of the stuffy court and outside into the fresh air. Scarlet's hands were black from the soil, and my heart beat in double-time at the sight. Although a couple of the Miacha's herbs had managed to grow around Brighid's flower, most of the gardens were dead. But if Scarlet could help tainted children heal, then perhaps she'd be a good influence on the land, too.

I knelt by Scarlet and Setanta, trying not to think about the problems. "We got a present, Scarlet. Look."

Rumble dropped the pups next to us. They immediately rolled over for the children. Rat almost lost her mind over the pair, while Scarlet giggled as a pup gently nibbled her fingertips.

"A present?" Vix sounded dismayed. "Those creatures?"

"They're dogs," I said wryly. "Calm down. What do you think of them, Setanta?"

His cheeks were flushed. "They're beautiful."

"You can help me choose their names if you like."

He looked pleased. "Mother, may I have a dog?"

Fiadh made an oddly strangled sound in her throat. "Perhaps someday, when you're older."

"Maybe you'll have one of their puppies." A part of me felt uncomfortable about letting dogs breed, but if these were so rare, then perhaps we had to let nature take its course.

"Oh, no," Fiadh said hurriedly. "You don't understand, Cara. These dogs will be extremely valuable. You won't need to give them away."

"If Setanta wants one, he can have one," I insisted. "If you don't want to be responsible for it, we can take care of it with these two." I reached out and brushed my hand across the black pup's back. "They're still babies. We're talking about extremely hypothetical puppies here." I looked up at her and smiled, but her face had whitened. "Are you okay?"

She turned away to wipe her eyes. I was confused. What had I said?

"I am most grateful," Fiadh said after a moment. "You honour us with just the suggestion."

I turned my attention back to Scarlet and Setanta. They were both delighted with the pups. "He really likes the black one," I said thoughtfully. "Maybe he should—"

"No!" Fiadh touched my shoulder. "You cannot give away a gift. It would be an insult."

But I still wondered what Drake was thinking. Surely he hated me by now, so why was he offering soldiers? Perhaps it was a trick. I couldn't tell which version of Drake had sent that message.

Later that evening, Rafe had already arranged a place in the stables for the dogs, but somehow, they both ended up eating meat from my fingers under the dinner table, much to the fascination of everyone present. And that night, the pups slept on either side of Scarlet on my bed. I sighed as I watched them. Maybe they would protect her if I kept them close. They were sweet pups. It was a good gift.

A sound at the window caught my attention. A crow had landed on the sill, and it stared at me.

"It watches," Orlaith said.

The bird flew into the room and perched on the headboard.

"There's no scroll," I said.

"It's not a messenger," Orlaith said. "They say that Badb was followed by crows. They were a sign on the battlefield."

"A sign of what?"

"Death for her enemies and victory for Badb."

"Maybe there's a nest in the ruined tower." I looked at the bird. "Crows are smart. I read that they have good memories."

"They do," Orlaith said. "They have been here and watched us and passed on the stories to their young. They have seen it all, but they cannot speak to tell the rest of us about it. Some call it their curse."

I shivered at the idea of crows passing myths on to other crows. But it wasn't exactly weird compared to most of the things I had seen and heard in the faery realm.

I got into bed next to Scarlet. The black pup looked at me, laid its head on my stomach, and sighed heavily. I fell asleep dreaming of giant dogs and a crow that spoke to me in a woman's voice. I couldn't hear the words, but as I woke, the sentence "You're not ready yet" refused to leave my head.

# Chapter 5

"A horse!" somebody shouted from outside before dawn broke.

Waking suddenly, I climbed out of bed and went to the window. On the track leading to the castle gates, a couple of fae held up torches, providing enough light for me to spot Dubh trotting toward the castle with Conn on his back. I couldn't see past Conn's broad shoulders to tell if a short Miacha woman accompanied him. But at least Conn and Dubh had returned safely. I squeezed my eyes shut, dizzy with relief. Every day that had passed without Conn's return had increased my guilt and reinforced the point that I was completely responsible for every single Darksider.

I quickly dressed myself and Scarlet, ignoring Rat's offers to help. The pups lay sprawled across the doorway until I opened the door. They sprinted outside, only to get tangled up in Rumble's legs. I tried not to laugh as he extricated himself.

"Conn is back," I said. "Let's go see what he brings."

Rumble nodded and escorted me downstairs to where Vix was waiting. She shot a look of disgust at the dogs. I brushed past her and hurried outside with Scarlet in my arms and the dogs at my heels. The animals ran off as soon as we left the castle, but I was more interested in Conn. He had already ridden through the gates, past the waiting soldiers, and when he saw me, he pulled up close. He jumped off Dubh, his massive black wings kicking up dust and dirt. A short woman with wrinkled skin the colour of ripe hazelnuts nimbly leapt off before Conn could help her down.

"You're okay," I said, seeing no obvious injuries.

Conn gave me a puzzled look then nodded.

Grey Eyes, one of the Miacha healers, greeted me warmly and cooed at Scarlet in my arms. "I brought some gifts. I had already planned on coming here soon."

I rubbed Dubh's nose. He snuffled and nibbled at my fingers as soon as I wasn't paying attention. When he saw the curious pups approach, he snorted loudly and stamped his feet. The male pup ran, but the female crept closer, growling.

"Sorry, faery horse. You're not the cutest animal in the realm anymore."

"We passed a carriage bearing the colours of the Green Court along the way," Conn said, catching my attention again. "They should arrive today."

"Probably an emissary in answer to our invitation. How was the ride?"

"Disturbing," he replied. "The land changes on a daily basis now."

"That's partly why I wanted to come," Grey Eyes said. "Our home is dying. If we don't find a way to stop it, we'll have nothing left."

"We should go inside," I said, feeling sick to my stomach. "You can tell us what you know after you have something to eat."

As we stepped into the main hallway, Fiadh came running toward us. She stopped short, looking anxious and excited all at once. "You're back," she said, her eyes only on Conn.

He just stared back at her, and I felt uncomfortable. I guided Grey Eyes toward the kitchen to let Fiadh and Conn have their moment alone.

"Desperation isn't pretty," Vix said as she caught up to Rumble.

"Whatever you say," I murmured, dropping a kiss on my daughter's head.

Cook gave me a dirty look when we stepped inside the kitchen. "And _what_ have I said about dogs?"

"Something about feeding them scraps," I teased, helping myself to a scone.

I sat with Grey Eyes as she checked over Scarlet. "She seems well. Growing fast. No taint." She sighed. "Unlike the rest of the realm."

"What's happening out there?"

"Darkness," she said in a glum voice. "And it's spreading."

"We'll do what we can to stop it. Have you brought"—I lowered my voice—"the weapon?"

She nodded, but her eyes darted from side to side. "It's with me. But it won't help much, I fear."

"You never know. Can you take a look at some people?"

"Of course."

I led her upstairs to the tower, leaving Scarlet with Vix and Rat. Rumble stayed with me.

"Sadler was using them to prolong his life, give him strength," I explained as I walked. "I thought... I don't know. I thought they would be free when I... when Sadler died. But the midwife says they're dying."

"How did he manage this?"

"Some kind of dark magic, I'm told." I shrugged. "The men responsible are dead. We may never know."

"Both dead," she said softly. "And how are you?"

"I'm fine. I saw Zoe. She seems to be coping."

"You sent her away from the faery realm in time." She patted my arm. "She was lucky to have you. Most humans are hidden away when they start to lose their minds."

"Forgotten about."

She glanced at me. "Not all fae are the same."

I nodded then opened the door to the tower room. Grey Eyes walked around the room, rubbing her arms as if cold.

"What do you think?" I asked.

"I think... we have a lot of work to do, but it could still be too late." She knelt by a young man and touched his cheek. "This is unlike anything I've seen before." She got the attention of one of the attendants. "Do their bodies function normally?"

Grey Eyes spent an hour in the room, looking less confident with every moment that passed. "I need the help of my sisters."

"Invite them then," I said.

"I cannot. Nothing grows here. We need our garden. But..." She tapped her chin. "We could take them in. They won't fit in our home, but with your help, we could set up a sort of camp. They need cleaner air, away from the concentration of taint that lingers here. I can taste it in the air. No good will come of them staying here."

"I'll ask Rafe to figure something out," I promised. "We'll pay you and give you anything that you need. The attendants can go with you."

"I will return. I want to keep an eye on the children." She pulled me outside then, lowering her voice to speak. "We both know my medicine can only do so much for the children here, don't we?"

I nodded, trying to keep my expression blank.

"It's Scarlet," she said. "She's descended from the leanan sídhe, with noble blood from both sides, so it's only natural she should have some form of magic. But I can't tell if she's a kind of conduit that's increasing the influence of the medicine, or... something else."

"Something else?"

"You must have noticed. You have to have seen how much better people feel around her. She's a kind of tonic to everyone around her. Setanta thrives in her presence."

"Please don't tell anyone. They'll think she's some kind of miracle cure. She's just a child."

"You have nothing to worry about when it comes to me or my sisters." She patted my hand reassuringly. "But if you want those children to heal, then they must spend as much time with Scarlet as possible."

"What if taking away so much of the taint hurts her? And how is it even possible for her to heal people this way?"

"She's not hurt. We would have seen signs of it already. As for why and how, perhaps what they say is true, and you were blessed by a deity. All I know is that she arrived when we needed her." Her smile was warm. "As did you."

"If we find a way to end this blight, will people recover naturally?"

"Not completely, but they'll certainly improve."

"Then that's what I'll do," I said determinedly.

She went back into the room and looked over her shoulder. "I don't doubt it."

I made arrangements with Rafe, who thrived when he was in control of logistics. Over a meal, he had an enthusiastic discussion with Grey Eyes and Thistle, and I was pretty sure everything would run smoothly with their involvement.

Later that morning, the carriage that Conn had spoken of arrived. With a sigh, I sat in my makeshift throne and waited to greet the emissary. I had to treat Brendan's emissary as well as I had Drake's. But all notions of equality flew out of my mind when I saw who walked through the door.

"Grim!" I jumped off my seat and rushed to meet the grey-toned brownie who had always been wise and loyal when it came to me. A golden light flew around my head before finally getting tangled up in my hair—it was my sprite friend Realtín. I hugged Grim and held the sprite close to my heart until I realised half the court was staring.

"Come on," I said. "We'll go somewhere more private and talk."

I organised a meeting in the new study, away from prying eyes. I took Scarlet and the pups and told Fiadh to have Conn and Grey Eyes join us as soon as the woman had finished checking up on Setanta.

"Rumble, wait outside the door with Vix for a bit, okay?"

He guarded the door, and I finally got a moment alone with my first faery friends.

I embraced them a second time. "I didn't think I would see you again."

"We always come back to each other," Realtín scoffed as she darted around the room.

I grinned, feeling more like my old self than I had in ages. When I first met the sprite and brownie, I had been a naïve college student who thought the world held nothing for her. They had been loyal to me even when I didn't deserve it. "Sit. Relax. They'll send food for you soon. I just wanted you for myself first."

I laid Scarlet on the floor next to her toys. The pups rolled on the rug next to her, having a playful battle amongst themselves.

"The Darkside hasn't changed her," Grim said, looking fondly at my daughter.

"She's always happy. It's like she doesn't even feel it. The darkness, I mean."

"Can you still?"

I rubbed my arm. I felt the presence of the darkness at all times, but it had become familiar. It didn't hurt me anymore. "I'm aware of it."

He studied me while Realtín sat on the black pup's back. It struggled to dislodge the sprite until the white bitch attempted to take a bite of her wings, and Realtín flew up in the air and almost collided with the ceiling.

"Stupid creature! Where did you get these dirty things?" She dropped onto the white pup's head, rubbed her cheek against the fur, and giggled. "What are their names?"

"No names yet, and they're a present from Drake—well, the Silver Court, I suppose. They're supposed to be cú sídhe."

"Brendan won't be pleased," Realtín said with a snort. "He only sent you wine."

"It's good wine," Grim said, unable to hide his smile. "Drake's gift was too extravagant."

"Who cares about presents?" I said. "How have you two been?"

A look passed between them that I couldn't quite decipher. "We are well," Grim said.

"And?"

"We heard what happened from Anya," Grim said at last. "Brendan hasn't spoken of it much."

"He's so angry at me. I thought he understood, but he must have been brooding over it. I wasn't trying to harm him. I swear."

"I know," Grim said. "I'm sure he's more worried about Drake than you—even more so when he hears of this gift."

That left me confused. "Why would that worry him?"

He frowned. "It will always be two against one when three are involved. You and Drake have a relationship through Scarlet. Brendan is right to be concerned."

"Drake's married to Sorcha," I said scornfully.

"All of the courts know where his heart lies," Grim said softly.

"That's ridiculous. He sent me away, and he didn't claim Scarlet until he wanted to steal the Darkside. I did what I did to stop him from having power over Brendan. Why would he feel warmly toward me now?"

"He's still the child's father," Grim continued. "And you have a history of... making certain choices regarding Drake."

That stung. "I haven't done _anything_ to hurt Brendan."

"And Drake hasn't made any suggestions?"

"No! I haven't even seen him. I mean..." I hesitated. "There was one time on the journey to see Sadler. He said something about having the power to do what he liked."

"Which would involve you?"

I shivered, feeling uncomfortable. "I don't know what you're asking, Grim."

"Should I be concerned that I'm on the wrong side?"

My mouth fell open. "When did it come to that?"

"That's what I'm trying to find out. I'm worried about all of you. What happened shouldn't have happened. Dealing with Sadler wasn't your responsibility."

"Then what should have happened?" I said coldly. "What should I have done?"

"The point is that you shouldn't have had to do anything. None of this has transpired in the way it was supposed to. I'm worried about the motives of those around you, Brendan, _and_ Drake. Too many plans have gone off track. Be wary, Cara. Not everything is as it seems."

I choked out a laugh. "This is the faery realm. Nothing is ever as it seems. So, Green Court emissary, tell me why you're here, and I'll feed and water you and send you on your way."

"That's unfair," Realtín said. "You know Grim loves you."

"How many times have I been told the fae don't love?"

Grim bowed his head. "The king accepts the invitation to your ceremony. He will bring his favoured subjects as his guests, as you requested."

"Great. Fantastic. Now if you'll excuse me—"

"I'm here as a friend," Grim said. "My job is secondary."

"Is it?" I looked at him, upset. "Are you really here to be my friend, or is it on behalf of your king? Because you sound like—"

"Please, stop this!" Grim's shoulders drooped. "You're all so paranoid. I have no idea what happened on the trip—I wasn't there—but I will not be a part of the delusions of you or either king. I am a free faery. Don't drag me into this and expect me to take sides."

I sank into my chair, feeling sullen.

"We are still your friends," Grim said. "We always will be."

My throat tightened. "I know. Maybe I'm just... worried I did the wrong thing. But I felt as though I didn't have a choice. Drake was offering Sadler an escape and would have taken two-thirds of the realm. Brendan would have been... I just didn't want any of that to happen. I thought taking the Darkside myself would protect Scarlet and stop Drake and Brendan from getting into some kind of war."

"I have no reason to disbelieve you. You've always done what you thought was best. What are your plans?"

"Survival. That's it. That's all I have."

"Are you aware of the state of the land?"

"I've heard a lot of bad news. We need to find a way to stop the blight before it's too late. I really need to talk to Brendan and Drake. Between the three of us, we should be able to find a way to beat this."

"Agreed," Grim said. "And if we may, we'd like to remain here until the ceremony."

"You're always welcome here," I said hesitantly. "But why are you eager to do it now?"

"If we take a look around your territory, we might be able to figure out why this darkness moves as it does. Some parts of the land become ravaged much more quickly than others. I would like to find answers."

"Fair enough. I thought Sadler was responsible for the spread, but he's gone, and parts of the realm are being destroyed still. I'd like to find out answers, too. But wait—have your lore masters found any more writings about the time a god decided to destroy the realm? I mean, we could use all the information we can get."

Grim looked uncomfortable. "We have been... promised a look at more complete literature."

"What's the delay?"

He avoided my eyes. "There've been some issues with the negotiations. Brendan's made counteroffers that have been politely declined."

"I take it this literature is in the hands of someone who doesn't swear fealty to the Green Court."

"Or any other." He still looked tense.

Before I could needle him for answers, a servant interrupted us with food for him and Realtín.

The sprite squealed enthusiastically. "I'm half-starved."

I grinned as her light flashed with gold happiness. "Go stuff yourself then."

While they ate, I played on the floor with Scarlet. She hadn't displayed any obvious magic since our return to court, but that didn't mean she wasn't using it. There was no way to know how much power she was even capable of wielding.

Fiadh and Setanta arrived with Conn and Grey Eyes. I invited Rumble and Vix inside, too. My list of trustworthy fae was growing on a daily basis.

"Should I fetch the other advisers?" Rumble asked.

I shook my head. "Let's see how this goes first."

"Setanta has improved since I last saw him," Grey Eyes said.

I looked over at Setanta, who had taken my place next to Scarlet. "It'll be good for him to have Eithne for a visit, too. Do you think being back on the Darkside might slow down his healing?"

"There's no sign of that yet, but things can change. I'm more concerned about the state of the Great Forest."

Grim nodded. "It's not just the forest. We've heard reports of disasters all over. Crops have failed, water supplies are being poisoned, and tribes have had to move out of their homes. The spread has grown frighteningly quick, and it almost reaches the castles of both the other courts."

"Everyone says the Great Forest is the heart of the realm. If it dies, there's no going back," I said.

"Time is against us," Conn said. "It's true that the spread is quickening. It's aggressive."

"It could have to do with us entering the Fade to retrieve Brendan," I said, thinking hard. "But that doesn't explain the sudden surge."

"I've seen something like this before," Fiadh said. "Back in the beginning, on the lands that Sadler coveted. We wondered if he was using some kind of magic because the blight always went where he wanted it to go. The spread would be sudden and aggressive like this, and then it would go no farther, as if whatever was feeding it had died."

"But Sadler's dead."

"His god isn't," Vix said. "Sadler was a pawn. There used to be rumours in the castle about a geis on him that caused the darkness."

"A geis?" I asked. "Why does that sound familiar?"

"It's like a curse," Grim said. "An obligation to do something—or not do something, as the case may be. His dealings with this god could have provoked some kind of geis that forced him to destroy the land or prevented him from stopping the spread for long."

"What?" My cheeks grew hot. "Are you telling me Sadler was a hero now? That the spread is happening because he isn't here to stop it?"

Grim raised his hands. "We're discussing possibilities. That's all. Nobody's calling Sadler a hero or anything of the sort."

"But what if it's true?" Vix said. "What if he really did hold back the blight?"

"Sadler's dead," I said. "There's nothing we can do about him."

"But he might not be the only pawn," Rumble said.

I clutched the arms of my chair, trying to hold in my panic. "We've no way of knowing who the pawns are unless they make it obvious. But the big question is this: is there a way to seal the rift in the Fade to at least slow down the blight?"

"I have no idea," Grim said.

"Nor do I," Fiadh said. "Only a very old and powerful fae would know the answers to such questions."

"And Brendan's already made inquiries from most of the obvious choices," Grim said.

"Even the hedge-witch doesn't know," Realtín said scornfully. "And according to her, she knows more than any of us about everything."

"I've met old and powerful beings," I said, thinking hard. "The Watcher guarded the way between the Black Marshes and the Hauntings. He said he was neither human nor fae, but he's safeguarding a path that leads to the Fade. If _he's_ linked to the Fade, then maybe he knows more than we do."

"You would cross the Black Marshes again?" Realtín asked in disbelief.

"The Watcher took us another way that led into a forest beyond the marshlands. If we could find it again, we could reach the Watcher."

"You can't leave," Fiadh said. "There's just no way. You haven't even taken part in the official ceremony yet. It's too risky."

Would I always be so closely tied to the Chaos Court? "That doesn't mean we can't make plans. We need to work together with the other courts to stop this plague on the land before it's too late. There might be another way."

"The First Tree," Grey Eyes said. "If it still exists."

That tree had been the source of the weapon I'd used to kill Deorad. "The First Tree _can_ cleanse the darkness. I don't know how, and I don't know why, but it's a possibility. And if anyone knows where to find this tree, it's the Guardian of the Forest. I mean, he's practically a tree himself."

"Nobody has seen this guardian in a long time," Fiadh said.

"I saw him," I said. "He traded me directions for one of Brighid's flowers."

"Well, it would be a start." Fiadh gave me a pointed look. "We just need to get through the ceremony first."

"How can you be so sure it will even work?" Vix asked.

"It works," Rumble said.

I nodded at the Miacha. "Do you have the weapon on you?"

Grey Eyes looked at the others before nodding.

"Let's show them what it does."

She handed me the small wooden stick, whose pointy end had sunk into Deorad's flesh. Even holding the weapon caused a magical reaction. I squeezed the object then held it out for everyone to see. It absorbed the taint from my hand, the blackness swirling along the wood until it disappeared.

And from the corner, Setanta watched a bland little stick do the same thing to me that Scarlet did to him. He caught my eye and nodded, and I knew he would keep Scarlet's secret for a little while longer.

My bedroom was getting crowded. Grim and Realtín refused to stay anywhere else, and I was glad to have them close, even if I suspected they thought ill of me because of Sadler. I couldn't remember the last time I had slept alone, and I was sure I would start thinking about all of the future's terrifying possibilities if I did.

When the others had fallen asleep, Grim and Realtín sat on my bed and spoke with me into the early hours of the morning—unofficial gossip like the kind we used to indulge in so long ago.

"Brendan came back in shock," Realtín said gleefully. "You messed up everyone's plans, Cara. He never expected you to kill Sadler."

"I didn't either, to be honest. I thought they would kill me on the spot. But the closer we got to the castle, the more sure I was that I had to do _something_."

"Anya said they called you Queen Badb," Grim said.

"They still do sometimes. And crows are always around the place." I didn't mention that I had been feeding them.

"Where's Bekind hiding?" Realtín asked. "Didn't she come here with you?"

"Oh, she's somewhere." I waved a hand, unconcerned. Bekind roamed like a real cat. "Probably avoiding the dogs. How is Anya?"

"Upset," Grim said. "She's coming to the ceremony even if the rest of us won't. Brendan refused to allow her to come with us, and she's in a rage because of it."

"Stupid pixie," Realtín said, but there was an affectionate tone to her words. "She doesn't see he's doing it for Arlen. Our king is a secret matchmaker these days."

"I'm sorry I left her behind," I admitted. "Scarlet misses her. I've missed... everyone who isn't here."

"Did you _really_ threaten Drake's life?" Realtín pinched the backs of my hands. "Some believe Brendan made that up to look less... pathetic."

I covered my burning cheeks with my hands. "I did, but you should have heard him. All that time he was talking about killing Sadler and all of the Darksiders, and then he offered to let him live in exchange for his crown. Sadler was delighted with himself, thinking he could advise Drake from the sidelines. I couldn't stand the idea of it."

"Or the idea of Drake being more powerful than Brendan," Realtín said, bursting into a fit of giggles.

"That, too, smartarse," I said.

"Brendan has always been worried about your preference for Drake," she said, snorting. "But Brendan's too stupid to see the truth: you _love_ him."

"Oh, grow _up_!"

She cackled. "Some of us have long memories. I remember how worried you were about Brendan during the Provings. I remember how you gave him strength." She pursed her lips and made kissing sounds.

"Grim, lock her away before I banish her from the Darkside."

He smiled while she stretched out on the bed, her light shining a honey-coloured gold, a shade I hadn't seen her use before. "Not even you would try to convince me that you went into the afterlife for a man you don't love," she said.

I flicked her to the end of the bed. That just made her laugh harder.

"You don't get to torment me, shithead sprite," I said. "You weren't there. You didn't see Sadler's face or hear Drake's voice. It just didn't seem fair. Brendan was supposed to be _the_ king, and then the half-human solitary fae who never had anything suddenly took the majority of the land from him? I didn't trust Drake. I think his people have been lying about a lot of things."

"That doesn't mean they do it on Drake's behalf," Grim said.

"Well, they're all suffering for it now," Realtín remarked.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

Realtín sat up. "You haven't heard?" She frowned at Grim. "You haven't told her?"

"Told me what? Grim?"

"She just means it weakened their positions." Grim sighed. "When Drake and Sorcha returned, Donella had almost ousted them from their thrones already. Many of their court members are more loyal to Nella than their own king. The banshees are unhappy, and there is no sign of an heir. Drake's failure embarrassed the Silver Court, and the rumours about you have only made it worse."

"Ugh. I don't know how Donella and I can be related. Did he finally kick out Donella or what?"

"She's merely out of favour," Grim said.

"Drake's too chicken to send the leanan sídhe away in case she takes half his subjects with her," Realtín said, her tone turning nasty. "His only hope now is a baby."

I swallowed hard. If Drake had another child, he'd never care about being a father to Scarlet. And the mirror had shown death in childbirth for his wife. "Wait. Why is Brendan suffering now?"

Grim hesitated. "Before his death, the lineage consultant made arrangements for potential brides to visit Brendan. One family in particular is newly risen and has put pressure on Brendan. They'll offer loyalty and soldiers upon a marriage, but if there is none, they have made it clear they will turn to his rival instead."

Grim's earlier uneasiness made sense now. "That's who has the old books we need, isn't it?"

Grim looked apologetic. "I didn't want to tell you in case it came to nothing."

"I'm a big girl, Grim. I can handle it when grownups do grownup things. Is that it? Brendan's people want him to marry into this family?" I refused to ask what Brendan wanted to do—not after Realtín's teasing.

"They want him to be strong," Grim said. "The Green Court as a whole is unhappy and scared by the spread of the Darkside. They fear you will claim _them_ as your own, or worse, that you will side with the Silver Court and push Brendan out of power."

"I wouldn't do that," I said. "That's not what I want."

"You are an enigma to them. They can't understand how this happened. 'She must be ambitious,' they say, 'to have gained so much in so little time.'"

"That was pretty much Brendan's line the last time I saw him," I said wryly. "Does _everyone_ forget that I was kidnapped and forced into a marriage I didn't want? How can that be considered ambitious?"

"When they worry, the fae have short memories. They forget what you have done for the realm. They forget you returned their king to them, while others remember that they blame you for Drake's presence in the first place. There were altercations between the two courts on the journey home."

"Drake's soldiers are too arrogant," Realtín said with a yawn. "And Brendan's soldiers felt hard done by. So, they kicked up a fuss on the way."

Worry darkened Grim's expression. "So you see, we are a realm divided in every sense of the word."

"The way the Darkside is spreading and the chance that the dead army will come back are pretty big issues," I said. "Why are they worried about politics?"

"The system of rule is built on politics," he said.

Bored, Realtín settled on my shoulder and began to doze off.

"Then the kings aren't friendly with each other _or_ me right now," I said slowly. "Yet they're both coming to my ceremony."

"As an emissary, I would reassure you, but as a friend, my advice is to surround yourself with soldiers on that day," Grim said. "Brendan and Drake's issues could spill out into your court."

"And get my people hurt," I said fiercely.

Grim smiled. _"Your_ people. Are you happy here?"

"It's the first place I've ever felt like I had a chance at belonging in." I made a face. "Half of the people hate my guts right now, but I can't imagine going home after experiencing all of this. I just can't."

"And now you're a queen in your own right. You have the power to make important decisions that affect your personal life. How does that change things between you and Drake?"

"I never had Drake," I said softly. "He was never mine, and now he belongs to someone else. I'm not going to be anyone's second choice." And a lump formed in my throat as I remembered Brendan saying those exact same words to me. "So," I said as brightly as I could manage, "what do you reckon my chances are of getting the kings to work together?"

Grim smiled. "If anyone can do it, it will be you."

# Chapter 6

Líle arrived looking as though she had just wandered through a swamp. I was in the meeting room when she was shown in, dishevelled and exhausted.

"All we need now is for Anya to show up," I joked as I hugged her in welcome. "You're late, by the way. I thought you weren't coming."

"I chose a bad path." She shrugged off her muddy cloak and dumped it on the floor. "A landslide made the way impossible."

"A landslide? Is that normal?"

"No." She sank into a chair. "It's not a good sign, Cara."

I asked Rumble to send for food and Grim.

Líle yawned and ran her hands through her hair. "I'm exhausted. I walked for miles out of my way to see the extent of the damage. It's too close for comfort."

"Grim wants to check out the surrounding lands to see what's going on. Maybe you could direct him to the landslide?"

"I'll do better than that. I'll take him myself."

I plopped into the seat next to her. "Well, rest up first."

"Where's Scarlet?" she asked.

"Asleep. Don't worry. She's with Vix and Rat and Orlaith. And the dogs."

"Well, I don't trust Vix, and I don't know the others."

"Orlaith was one of Reynard's old soldiers."

She snorted. "Yet another I don't trust."

"She switched sides for me."

"That doesn't mean I trust her. Wait—what dogs?"

"Drake sent me a pair of cú sídhe."

"He did not."

"They're just pups." I shrugged. "I didn't know it was that big of a deal."

"What did Brendan send?"

"Wine, I think."

"Uh-oh. He's going to freak out."

I laughed. "He's not that childish."

"You don't understand. It's a sign of how close the courts are. Drake's gift makes a kind of claim on you."

I rubbed my arms, uncomfortable. I didn't need to be claimed by anyone. The door opened, and Rumble returned. Bekind slipped inside on all fours.

"There you are," I said. "Did you get lost or something?"

Her meow sounded slightly snarky.

The food arrived, and Grim and Realtín showed up shortly afterward. The dogs ran into the room with them. Bekind let out an inhuman yowl and leapt onto my shoulder. The dogs sniffed at the chair in curiosity. In her panic, Bekind shifted into her human form, kneeing me in the face in the process.

Realtín's giggles filled the air.

"Oh, ew," I said, getting away from Bekind.

"It was an accident," she exclaimed. Líle rolled her eyes and threw her muddy cloak at Bekind then moved to the table to join Grim so they could eat together.

I ushered the now-whining pups away from the chair until Bekind slid into the seat, her legs gathered to her chest and the cloak wrapped around her.

"You had to get them," she said, breathing heavily. " _Two_ of them."

"They were a gift," I protested.

"A gift who'll forever try to eat me. Do you know how painful that is when you're immortal?"

I sat next to her. "I'm not going to let them eat you, Bek."

"They'll grow. They won't be cute forever. And you can't boss around a cú sidhe. They're going to be like two Dubhs except more vicious."

Realtín perched on the black pup's back. "Oh, yes. So very scary."

I exchanged a weary glance with Líle.

"We don't mix," Bekind said.

"Yeah, well, maybe it'll be worth it to have them around if it means I get to talk to you on occasion. What's going on with you?"

Bekind snorted, keeping her wary gaze on the pups, who seemed to have forgotten about her. "I spy with my little cat eye."

"You don't have to spy anymore," I said.

"If you believe a queen doesn't need spies, then you're even more ridiculous than you sound."

"You should have spies," Grim said, looking up from his meal.

I shrank back into my seat. "Why can't things be easy?"

"Nothing worth having is easy," Líle said with her mouth full. "Your grandfather is amusing, by the way. He told me all sorts of embarrassing stories about your childhood. You were a very odd child. Are all human children so strange?"

"Yes, we're all oddballs." I released a heavy sigh. "Okay, then. Tell me why I need spies in my own home."

"It's not your home," Bekind scoffed. "It's your job. And the person in charge can't please everyone, especially when it comes to these kinds of people."

" _These_ kinds? That's a bit judgy."

"It's not a judgement—it's a statement of fact. The people here are steeped in tradition. Brendan may have a somewhat modern way of thinking, but most of the upper echelon does not. And when you please one person, you stand a good chance of making another an enemy for life."

"Great," I said. "I'm filled with confidence. And I'm supposed to do what—maintain a mediocre level of happiness amongst the entire court by following outdated rules?"

"If you want to play it safe." She grinned. "But when have you ever done that?"

"At least _try_ to play it safe," Grim said plaintively.

"Who have I pissed off so far? Besides Brendan."

Grim choked on his food. "I wouldn't call him pissed off, as such."

Realtín giggled loudly. "He destroyed his bedroom when he returned. Refused to attend court for three days until Arlen told him to snap out of it."

"Arlen said that?" I blew out a whistle. "What happened then?"

"Enough gossiping," Bekind said crossly. "We were discussing something important here."

"Were we?" I sighed again at the glare on her face. "Fine. Who have I insulted then?"

"Supporters of Fiadh's husband, for one."

"They left with him, I thought. Glic was gone before I even arrived."

"Not all of them left. Rafe has been an annoyance. Nobody's even heard of his family." She screwed up her nose. "I don't think he even _has_ a family. Marron's a child of _Deorad,_ for heaven's sake. Levin's ugly enough to give children nightmares, and have you heard that horrific sound he calls a laugh? In human terms, Thistle's basically a big hippie and—"

I couldn't stop the giggle that erupted from my throat.

Bekind waggled a finger. "You're listening to the cooks and gardeners before the old-bloods. The class system is being systematically destroyed. You're driving the nobles insane."

"Oh, who cares?"

"You should care," Grim said. "They're the problem in any court. But they're influential and powerful. You'll need them as allies if you want to succeed."

"They need my favour, too," I protested.

"The ceremony hasn't happened yet." Líle sounded serious. "There's time for it all to go wrong. You'll be regent, Cara. That'll last as long as they don't believe somebody else can control Scarlet's interests in your place."

"I'm her mother."

"And you betrayed both kings," she said softly. "How the kings behave at the ceremony will be telling, and all will be watching. If it becomes apparent that you've lost your strongest allies, then all may be lost."

"They should be worrying about finding out how to stop this blight before they write me off completely."

"They let you worry about that," Grim said. "And rightly so. How many of them would have the power or inclination to track down ancient stories that tell us how to put a god back to sleep?"

"Yes, he only sleeps," Líle said in a voice that wasn't quite her own. "There was no willing vessel to do otherwise."

We all stared at her until she dropped her fork.

"I... I misspoke," she said at last. "Some remnant of a memory that doesn't belong to me."

"Then _you_ know," Bekind said. "You can tell us more."

"No, no." Líle recoiled in horror. "It was just a flash. I can't..."

"It's okay," I said gently.

Travelling through the Hauntings to reach the Fade had left its mark on Líle. The Hauntings were full of the memories of the shades who protected the Fade. Another fae's memories had attached themselves to Líle, leaving her broken and demented. I didn't want to ruin her recovery by digging into them.

Bekind cleared her throat. "Well... Cara, there are murmurings that the blight is your fault."

"It started before I got here."

"Unless you expanded the rift while saving Brendan's soul from the Fade." Realtín stuck out her tongue when she saw my expression. "I'm just giving you their likely arguments."

"They'll conveniently forget that Sadler brought them poverty," Grim said. "Be wary."

"I'm always wary," I said. "That's my default state of mind."

"They expect you to marry a faery," Bekind said. "And perhaps that would solve some of these issues." She shrugged. "If it's the right faery, anyway."

I felt sick. "I'm not getting married. Not now, not ever. This court will _never_ have a king as long as I'm around."

"Oh, just marry Brendan and be done with it," Realtín screeched.

Everyone in the room looked directly at me, so I turned to Grim.

" _Anyway_ , you're here because there's been a landslide, which will also probably be blamed on me. You said you wanted to see the state of the land, and Líle's offered to take you. I'll send one of my advisers with you, just in case." But I desperately needed to change the subject. Taking power was one thing, keeping it quite another.

Conventions at court were far more relaxed than before, and most of the fae soon grew used to it. I noticed the occasional dirty look, but I could give a pretty good death stare of my own. Bekind continued spying, but I was starting to think I needed quite a few more spies than a solitary cat.

The Darksiders were becoming accustomed to the idea of sitting at a table and discussing their problems. Anyone with an issue sat directly across from me. Fiadh often sat with us, but she only interfered if I asked her opinion. Setanta and Scarlet played close by, carefully watched over by Vix, Conn, and Rat.

Realtín had decided to remain behind when Grim and Líle took the lay of the land. The little sprite was more of a distraction than anything else, but I liked having her around. Rumble was always near me, while Orlaith paced casually, maintaining an observant eye on the entire room. I was starting to feel safe. Which of course meant I wasn't safe at all.

My morning routine consisted of going for a run or a ride on Dubh then back to have breakfast with Scarlet well before court started for the day. Some of the courtiers muttered complaints about me having the audacity to take care of my own child like a commoner, but if that was their worst complaint, I was happy.

The morning Grim and Líle left was the same day Grey Eyes took the sick, unconscious fae back to her home with her. I rode out with the procession for a while before turning back. Rumble was by my side, and a dozen black-armoured soldiers had accompanied us, not including the scout who Rumble always insisted travel ahead whenever we left the castle.

It was a good morning to be outdoors, and I wished I could stay outside all day, but Scarlet and the court were waiting, so we headed back before long.

Close to the castle, right in the centre of the path, lay the body of the scout, right where we couldn't miss her. She wasn't moving, and I immediately jumped off Dubh to go to her.

"Wait," Rumble called out. "It could be—"

"She could be alive," I snapped. "We have to help her."

Rumble and four of the soldiers dismounted to follow me.

I reached the scout. Her throat had been cut. She didn't look as if she'd even put up a fight. Had she known her attacker?

"Now!" a voice in the woods shouted.

An all-too-familiar twang followed. Rumble raised his shield just in time to stop an arrow from hitting me.

"Thanks." I raised my voice. "Everyone into the woods. Before they shoot again." I grabbed my dagger. "You four on foot, stay with me and Rumble. The rest of you split up and try to find that archer!"

"We're going back to the castle," Rumble said.

"No." I grabbed Dubh's reins and ran into the shelter of the trees. "We're going to find whoever killed our scout."

"Warrior queen!" one of the soldiers cried.

The soldiers seemed pretty bolstered by my lead. Whoever had shouted the command hadn't stuck around to attack, so I ordered our three sets of soldiers to hunt their prey. The group with me grew excited, and it was contagious.

"Calm your blood," Rumble muttered under his breath. "They'll become reckless."

I didn't have time to worry about that. We raced through the woods on a track that had recently been used. I was faster than the others and took the lead, much to Rumble's concern. But it was so freeing to take control of a situation for a change that I couldn't slow down.

Soon, we heard the sounds of a group ahead. I slowed and signalled for the others to quieten themselves. I made to take the lead, but Rumble stepped in my way.

"Let us protect you," he said. "If you should receive even the smallest injury, these soldiers will be shamed."

I hesitated, looking at each of them. "If I'm injured, it'll be my fault," I whispered. "But I'll follow." _For now,_ I silently added.

Rumble took over, organising the four soldiers. He moved ahead, and I stayed with the group this time. We came into a clearing where a camp was being hurriedly packed away by seven fae. As my soldiers dove into battle, one of the strangers tried to run. Everyone else was busy fighting for their lives, so I ran after him and tackled him to the ground. He fought back, but I managed to elbow him neatly in the nose and knock a blade out of his hand. It was covered in dried blood.

Gripping his neck, a flash of the scout's body came to me. Enraged, I held my own dagger to the stranger's throat, and he cowered. His quick submission was confusing, but in the heat of battle, I didn't care.

I heard footsteps approach and prepared to strike out when I heard Rumble call my name. "It's over," he said. "They're all dead."

I looked up in surprise. A few minutes beforehand, my soldiers had been struggling. How had the tide of battle shifted so quickly?

The soldiers were all staring at me, maybe wondering why the man beneath me was still alive.

"He's the one who killed her." I glared at him. "You killed one of my people, and now you're going to tell us why."

"I'll make him talk," Rumble said.

I jumped to my feet to get out of the way. Rumble gripped the traitor's neck and lifted him into the air.

"Who sent you?" he bellowed before flinging the man to the ground.

Even my toes curled at the sound of Rumble's voice. I almost pitied our captive.

He advanced on the man again. "Last chance to answer."

"I'd rather die," the captive hissed. He jumped up and ran headfirst into a tree before falling to the ground, unconscious.

I rushed over. The captive's mouth was foaming.

"Don't touch him," Rumble said. "He had something in his cheek."

I looked up at him. "Poison?"

"Suicide to avoid betraying his master," one of the soldiers sneered.

"Any of you recognise these people?" I asked, looking amongst the bodies. Death didn't faze me as much as it once had. As my anger died, my empathy returned. The strangers had been people, too.

"We should get back to the castle in case they had reinforcements," Rumble said. "Donncha will send patrols out today."

"What about Grim and Líle and the Miacha's group?" I asked, suddenly anxious. "They could be attacked, too."

"Donncha will send an escort after them." Rumble glanced at the camp. "But those attackers wanted you, my lady, not the others."

We returned to the horses and found the others, who had picked off any archers they found in the woods. As we rode back to the castle, the soldiers began to sing a cheerful battle song. I couldn't help but get caught up in their happiness at the win.

"You did well," Rumble said. "You have these men's loyalties entirely after today."

"Great. How many more assassination attempts do I have to survive to sway the entire court?"

His low laugh surprised me. "It wasn't the attempt. It was the way you went after those who killed one of your soldiers. You pursued them rightfully, protected your own, and acted like the warrior queen you were professed to be. Sadler didn't fight beside them. I think you impressed them." He hesitated. "But please don't do it again. If you had died, the entire court would have fallen with you."

But even his warning couldn't dampen my spirits. The fae _could_ accept me. I would find a way to make them all accept me.

I had just promised an old tribesman sent by Bas and Jackie that I would send medicine for the sick children in his tribe, and circumstances allowed me a brief break. With Rafe organising the crowds, everything ran more smoothly. His presence may have irritated the so-called old-bloods, but I was finding him invaluable. I had watched him the first few days, and he treated everyone equally, no matter how they treated him. That was what I needed.

Then again, I had been feeling upbeat anyway since the assassination attempt. Many of the soldiers had warmed to me in a way they couldn't before. If something did go wrong, I was confident they had my back.

"You should take more breaks," Fiadh warned as I indulged in a long, satisfying stretch.

"I don't want to keep everyone waiting too long," I said, watching the children play with the pups. The animals had already grown noticeably since their arrival, but they were careful around the children and especially gentle with Setanta. I wondered what they sensed in him.

Setanta looked up and caught my eye. "Haven't you named them yet?"

Fiadh froze, as though afraid the child had misspoken.

"Not yet," I said. "I haven't been able to think of any good ones, I'm afraid."

"They do need good names. There's power in a name. Isn't that right, mother?"

Fiadh's face was flushed. "So they say."

"You're right. They deserve worthy names." I nudged Fiadh. "Calm down. Don't make a big deal of it."

She fanned her face. "It's partly because now he talks and partly because he dares talk to a queen as his equal. If people heard..."

"He's a child. What do they expect me to do to him?"

"It's not been long since we had a pair of queens," she said. "Their methods won't be forgotten any easier than Sadler's."

I squeezed her hand and pretended not to see her flinch. "I'm not them."

She met my eyes. "Sometimes, you'll have to be."

"But not today. And definitely not with a child."

"I don't mean to offend," she whispered.

"I'm not offended," I said, irritated.

Setanta frowned at the black pup. "You should give them names from the old stories."

I moved to sit next to the children. "What stories?" I asked as I pinned Scarlet's hair out of her eyes.

He hesitated and looked at his mother for reassurance. Fiadh nodded, and he seemed satisfied enough to continue.

"Mother used to read me old stories. Good stories."

"Do you want the queen to name her dogs for the old heroes?" Fiadh asked.

He reached out and fondled the white pup's ears. "They're a pair. They should have a pair of names like in the stories." His face flushed with his excitement. "Like... Tristram and Iseult. Or maybe Deirdre and Diarmuid."

"They were... humans, right?" I said hesitantly.

"The fae used to watch over humans with more care than we do now," Fiadh explained. "The stories of our legends often involve humans."

"And ours often involve the faery world," I said with a smile. "I was more interested in the faery stories when I was a child, Setanta. So, how did your stories go?"

"Mother, shall I tell her?"

"Perhaps another time," Fiadh demurred.

I laughed. "You have to tell me now."

"I can tell you." Setanta lowered his voice and spoke in a dramatic tone. "Once, there was a beautiful princess named Deirdre. She was betrothed to an old, powerful king who was loved by all. But on her wedding day, she met his most trusted soldier, Diarmuid, and fell in love at first glance. To free herself, she drugged the drink of everyone but Diarmuid, and she beguiled him into running away with her. A feud followed. Family against family. Friend against friend. Nobody could blame true love, some said. Others said that honour and a promise were far more important."

"What happened next?" I asked in spite of myself.

Setanta smiled. He knew he had me. "The king was part fae, and his faery relatives predicted that Diarmuid would eventually die from wounds inflicted by a boar. This king claimed to forgive the pair, and the wars ended. However, the king arranged a boar hunt, and he invited his old friend, Diarmuid. Sure enough, the soldier was badly injured. The king was the only one in the land who could heal his wounds. Deirdre begged him to help, but the king refused once, then twice, and Diarmuid lay dying. Deirdre went to the king a third time, promising him her own life if he would just agree. He took this bargain, but it was too late for Diarmuid—and too late for Deirdre, too."

I swallowed hard. "That sounds sad."

"Love is death," Setanta said as if it were nothing. "This is how we know that love brings death to the fae."

"What about the other story? Is that one any better?"

"Better?" He frowned. "I don't know. Would you like to hear it?" He sounded so doubtful that I had to say yes.

"There was once a beautiful Irish princess called Iseult. She was betrothed to a king from across the sea. The king's nephew, Tristram, arrived to take Iseult to his uncle for marriage. But the journey was long, and Iseult slowly fell in love with Tristram. Tristram was too loyal to his uncle to do anything but his duty, so he took her home and watched in silence as the two people he loved best wed each other."

I grew uneasy. The stories the fae told their children explained a _lot_.

"Iseult found the king to be a good, kind man, and a different sort of love for him grew in her heart. All three loved each other well, but Tristram and Iseult were soul mates. They couldn't stop loving each other, and even duty and honour faded in the shadows of their love." He met my eyes. "It's known that when soul mates meet, nothing can keep them apart. The king should have sent Tristram away, but he loved him too much."

"Well," I said, "it's hard to send away people you care about."

"This is how we know that love makes fools of even the wisest men, and lovers can never be trusted."

"I don't think—"

"You'll see. They weren't careful or clever enough to hide, and their betrayal was made public, leaving the king brokenhearted. By the laws of his own country, he was forced to punish them with death. But he couldn't bear to part them from each other, or even be parted from them himself. He buried them side by side in the garden so he could see the graves from his window. But even in death, they couldn't be truly separated. Vines grew from each grave and intertwined together for eternity."

Embarrassingly, a lump had formed in my throat. "Also sad. Fiadh, didn't you read him any happier stories?"

She laughed, thinking it a joke. "There are only tragedies. The fae aren't capable of remembering anything else." She shrugged when she caught the look on my face. "The stories are sometimes told to teach morals. Iseult wasted her chance of power and happiness to follow her heart, and it led to her ruin. Deirdre led a good man down a path he never wanted and lost him forever. As Setanta said, to the fae, love is weakness and death." She gave her son a loving look. "And that's why I'm glad I learned another way to live."

"It kind of explains why the fae have trouble trusting me. They've been raised to believe I bring death my way. The stories make it sound like human women cause all of the problems." I was only half joking.

"You're not a human anymore," Fiadh said shortly. "You're one of us, and anyone who says otherwise can easily be silenced."

"Steady on," I said laughingly. "Let's not execute the entire court just yet. Fiadh, can I ask you a question?"

She looked at me with surprise. "Of course. You're the queen."

"Not as a queen. As a person. I want you to answer because you want to, not because you're forced to."

Her smile was gentle. "I know. It's a force of habit to bring everything back to status. It's what we've been doing for generations. What is it you wanted to ask?"

"Bekind said the fae are expecting me to marry. Is she right?"

"You're not new to the ways of the court. All people of your rank are expected to marry, even King Brendan."

"But I have an heir already. And I'm only regent. Why should I be expected to marry anyone?"

She frowned. "Well, it might bring stability, or at least the appearance of it. And a partner from the right family might gain allies you wouldn't otherwise have. Alliances made through marriage and blood are more powerful than those formed through words. Nobody is going to force you to marry, not again, but it would be in your best interest to marry and marry wisely. You have your heir, but you need alliances of your own now, too."

"Who do they expect me to marry?"

She waved a hand. "They all have different expectations depending on their loyalties. If life gets any rougher here, you may need to consider it as a possibility. You can always have him sent away when things settle down."

"And take him out for special occasions?" I folded my arms. "I was already married to a madman. I'm not going there again. And certainly not for the sake of appearances."

"As I said, it's your choice." She gave me a knowing smile. "And I, too, know the problems of a bad marriage."

"At least Glic isn't here."

"But he's likely in my ancestral home. The land may be useless, but it's a point of pride. He took my dignity. I don't wish for even my blackened land to give him shelter."

"You sent people to look for him, didn't you?"

"They haven't returned." She sighed. "When things settle, I'll confront him once and for all."

Rafe led in the next person with an issue for me to deal with, but for the rest of the day, I couldn't stop thinking about marriage alliances and Setanta's stories. What kind of path was _I_ taking?

# Chapter 7

I rose earlier than usual because of shouting outside my window. I got up to look outside without disturbing the others. In the pale light of dawn breaking, the world outside appeared eerier than usual as though a tint overlaid the land.

When I had first arrived in the Darkside more than two years ago, I had been surprised to see how green it was, how beautiful the untainted parts of the realm could be. Looking out this very same window back then would have given me a spectacular view of a land with so much potential. Now, the landscape was marred by patches of blight. The only bright spark was the Brighid's flower in the gardens, but even that cut a lonely figure amid the despair.

A shiver ran over me as I caught sight of the source of the noise. A group of fae were fighting in the yard, shoving then kicking something I couldn't see.

"Stop that!" I shouted.

The group moved apart at my cry, and I saw a soldier on the ground, bloody and beaten.

"Orlaith, wake up," I urged. "Get Donncha. A soldier is hurt in the yard. Oh, it's all right. He's arrived."

Orlaith joined me at the window. "They're angry. They suspect us all of being traitors."

"Traitors to whom?" I asked.

"To you, to Sadler, to the little princess."

"But the soldiers haven't made a move against me."

She shrugged. "Those idiots out there just wanted to fight. They say they're free fae. They should be able to defend themselves."

"A group against one? Not bloody likely." My blood boiled with a sudden rush of anger. Orlaith backed away in surprise.

I took a deep breath to calm down. "Sorry. Just a reaction. Could you go and make sure that soldier is okay?"

Donncha's men were taking control of the situation, I could see that, but I still felt helpless. And then one of the attackers looked up at me and held my gaze as though he didn't care that I had seen him. His sneer was unsettling, and I had to force myself to remain in the one spot until Donncha dragged him out of view. I let out a breath I had been holding and sagged against the windowsill.

I had to deal with all sorts of fae with different issues. There were old feuds and bad blood, but some fae suffered a kind of bloodlust. I had seen it in Brendan, but it was different here in the Darkside, darker somehow. There had to be a way to cool them down; I just hadn't figured it out yet. And my rushes to anger weren't helping either. Was I influencing the fae and bringing them to violence? Perhaps that was why my soldiers had quickly won what should have been a tough battle in the woods.

Some of the Darksiders had been growing more sullen and mouthy since I'd arrived. Pleasing one group only ever offended another. I had given them freedom, but many of them appeared to suddenly resent me for it. What did they want me to be—another Sadler? Sometimes it felt that way.

I had tried to be kind and fair every day at court, but people constantly wanted more. The more I gave, the more they wanted from me. They were free to voice their opinions, and I was no longer the vulnerable human in their care while a harsh master set the rules. I was the one with the figurative whip, and they plainly resented me for it.

"Do you think I need to look more... queenly?" I asked Rumble after I had gotten ready a little later. "Maybe I look too human?"

There was amusement in Rumble's tone. "It's best you're comfortable."

"Yeah, but do you think people would respect me more if I wore a stupid gown? That's what I'm asking."

"Actions speak louder than... clothing."

I lifted Scarlet to kiss her pudgy cheek. "Hear that, Scarlet? Listen to Rumble when you grow up. He knows his stuff."

"Mocked by a queen," he said, his voice so low that only I could hear him. "My life's purpose, achieved."

I could only grin.

Our procession moved down the stairs and toward the dining hall for breakfast. The attack in the woods had nixed any rides for a while. I supposed it was better I spent more time with the fae anyway.

Rafe had organised the breakfasts in a way that made sure every group of fae got a chance to sit with us. The rotation had been a good idea, but some of the fae looked miserable at the idea of being in the same room as their queen, never mind the same table.

We passed by a group of workers. I smiled at them, but as we walked on, one of them groused loudly about needing more food.

After the morning's fight outside, my hackles immediately rose. I whirled around to face him. He cringed a little, but the others shoved him forward.

"What did you say?" I asked pleasantly enough, giving him a chance to shut the hell up.

"I said, we need more food." He pouted. "We deserve more meals."

I stared at him, exasperated. "Excuse me? You get more food than anyone."

"I've seen your plate," he sneered. "Save the best for your favourites, always."

I tried to force my sudden rise of anger back under the surface. "You were starving before I got here."

"Weren't worked this much, neither."

"If you don't like it, leave," I retorted, handing Scarlet to Rat, who whimpered at my touch. "Try and live off the land if you think you're better off elsewhere. We're getting as much food as we can from the human realm."

"We'd get more if you'd take it like you should."

I took a few steps closer to him, fighting back the urge to touch my dagger's hilt. "You mean steal it? Not going to happen. Humans are _not_ to be interfered with like that."

"You came here and told us we were free fae."

"If you live in this court, you accept our rules," I said sweetly. "That means humans are off-limits, and you have to work for your keep. And maybe try to keep the pathetic complaints to a minimum."

"Told us we were free," he muttered under his breath. "What freedom is this?"

"The kind I'm offering," I said in a dangerously low tone. "Take it or leave it."

"Ceremony hasn't happened yet," he said as I turned away.

This time, I really did grab my dagger, but Rumble was there first, his large hand wrapping around the faery's neck. The other workers backed away in a hurry, knocking each other over to get away from Rumble. Rumble squeezed, and the faery made a retching sound.

"Be careful of the words you speak," Rumble said calmly. "They can't be taken back."

The stench of urine filled the air as the faery's bladder emptied.

"Let him go," I said scornfully.

Rumble let go immediately, and the faery fled. The workers gazed at me, some in awe, some with anger glittering in their eyes. The black veins in my arm itched. And as I walked away from the big-mouthed faery, I wondered if I had been foolish to give them any kind of freedom at all. I strode onward, moving quickly to keep at a distance from Scarlet when I was in such a dark mood.

"You need to calm down," Rumble said under his breath, easily keeping in step with me.

"What now?"

"You're influencing everyone with your anger. You must be calm, or this will end badly."

"Don't you start telling me what to do, Rumble."

"Of course."

"I didn't mean that," I said, frustrated. "I just don't know how to calm it down. Taking over hasn't exactly been without its stresses."

"Then find a way to expend your emotions." He glanced at me for the first time. "Weak-minded fae will be influenced by even the briefest moment of anger from you, and when they swear fealty to their official regent at the ceremony, your influence will grow even stronger."

"I'm not magical."

"You have a power of your own. And you will live by the rules of this world, not the human one. The power of a court can make all the difference. If you don't control your temper before the ceremony, we're all in danger from you."

"I... I'll try," I said. But I needed to figure out how.

There had been murmurs of disapproval around the court, but the incident with the worker put an end to the most obvious complaints for a while. I tried my best to stay calm, spending even more time with Scarlet than before, but the black veins kept throbbing as if a bomb were about to go off. It had taken Rumble's observation to make me realise that the bomb might be me.

Líle and Grim returned a couple of days before the ceremony. I had been holding court as usual when they arrived, their faces glum. That was the last thing I needed. Everyone in court was stressed about the preparations for the ceremony, and the entire castle had been turned upside down in the process. I didn't even recognise the gardens. Thistle had arranged a delivery of plants and flowers from the human realm. Instead of planting them in the earth, we kept them in the pots. They brought splashes of colour where there had been none, but even though the flowers hadn't been planted, they were still dying—just more slowly than everything in the ground.

"Come back after lunch," I told the noble sitting before me. "We'll finish this then."

She nodded and left, much to my relief. I had half expected an argument.

"Well?" I said when Grim and Líle sat down.

Realtín perched on Grim's shoulder. Although I had mentioned lunch, which was usually enough to send everyone scrambling to the dining hall, half the court remained to hear what was going on. I had vowed to be open with them, and this was the outcome.

Grim and Líle exchanged glances. "It's not good news," Líle said.

"When is it ever?" I slumped in my seat. "What happened?"

"We examined the landslide, and it appears to have been caused by degeneration of the earth," Grim said. "The soil itself is wet with a black substance, and the layers beneath have weakened over time. There was no preventing it. And more areas will follow with the same outcome sooner or later. But that's not all."

I clutched the arms of my chair, bracing myself.

"A sinkhole appeared less than twenty miles away," Líle said, looking worried. "We investigated the area, trying to find the cause, but it was too dangerous to remain for long. It's spreading. Given enough time, it will eventually swallow the castle."

"How did it happen?"

"Deterioration under the surface perhaps." She lifted her shoulders in a shrug. "It's hard to say exactly. But it's this blight that's—"

"It's an omen," somebody shouted from the crowd of people lining the great hall. "The realm is protesting a human queen!"

The faery was shushed by those around him. I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed my temples. It wasn't the first time I had heard those words, and I was pretty sure it wasn't going to be the last. While many of the Darksiders were happy to work hard, some seemed intent on driving me crazy.

"You can't keep letting them get away with that," Vix warned from my side.

"I can't be Sadler."

"No, but you have to be a queen."

I looked at her, but she was staring straight ahead. She was right. Half the court was out of control, and the ceremony hadn't even begun yet. With news of the realm literally falling apart around us, I had no idea where to even begin. I was out of my league and probably out of my mind to even think I could manage to lead the Chaos Court in anything.

Donncha surreptitiously led the loud faery away without me needing to say a word. In the meantime, a woman ran up to the table. "I want to go home. I'm sick of this court, and I want to go home."

"You're all free men and women," I said. "I'm not forcing you to stay here."

"Reynard burned my home down to the ground. I've nothing left. I want to rebuild."

"As soon as—"

"You're building this castle back up, and for what? You'll either die, or another will take the throne right from under you. You're just a human. What can you do to stop anyone? I won't stay here to be murdered in the next battle or be swallowed up by the ground. I need supplies to go home, and you're going to give them to me."

"You have a place to stay here. You're not homeless," I said, my anger rising at her tone. "We're restoring the castle so people like you have a place to stay. I don't have to do that. Sadler had you all starving to death in tents, remember? When we're back on our feet, we can work on those who lost their homes, but right now, the spreading of the blight is the only problem we need to worry about."

"A blight you caused," she snapped. "Nobody talked about the realm destroying itself when Sadler was in charge."

"That's because he didn't care enough to check!"

"So you say. This court is poison, and you're the cause of it. We were better off with Sadler."

I rose to my feet. "Better off starving and terrified of being noticed?" My voice had risen, too. "I'm done. Court is over for the day."

"What about me?" the woman spluttered.

I brushed past her, only hesitating to say, "You have your answer. If I were you, I'd be more concerned about pitching in to help this realm than wasting time whining about things we can't change."

When I reached the door, I heard her mutter, "Oh, things can change."

I whirled around to face her again. "Did you have something else to say to me?"

She looked at me but held her tongue. Sullen, she shook her head.

I left the room, my blood boiling all over again. In the hallway, I leaned against the wall and tried to control my breathing. When the door opened, I expected to see Rumble, but it was Vix instead.

"You should have ordered her death," Vix said.

"For speaking her mind?" I sighed wearily. "Go watch over Scarlet."

"Rumble's with her. I needed to speak to you. You must act, Cara. They'll keep pushing until you push back."

"But I don't want to be like Sadler. I don't want them to fear me. I don't want to hurt them."

"Then lead them," she said impatiently. "But do it soon, or you might not make it to the ceremony."

"They need me if they want Scarlet."

"They have Scarlet," she explained as though talking to a child. "She's here. If you die, here she'll remain."

"Líle or Brendan would—"

"Do nothing," Vix hissed. "Líle would die if she tried, and you betrayed Brendan. Why would he help you now? And if you die, who's to stop the next ruler from declaring war on the Green Court? Who's to say it won't be the Silver King? Or worse, a second Reynard? This isn't a game! You're playing with our lives. Those of us who align ourselves with you will die if you go down. You'll drag us all with you. And Scarlet will be friendless, only influenced by those who murdered her mother. Is that what you want?"

"What the fuck, Vix? You brought me here, encouraged me. If you didn't think I was good enough to do this, then why the hell did you help me get here?"

"Because I thought you had the balls to get things done!" she shouted. She held up her hands. "See? You should have me whipped for that!"

"Whipped? You're an actual crazy person. I can't go around whipping people for raising their voices."

"Then you need to be prepared to defend yourself because sooner or later, somebody's going to think you're weak and come to take your life. And I don't mean foolish attempts in the woods while you're surrounded by soldiers. I mean an assassin who picks us off one by one until you have no protection. What are you going to do then, Cara, when we're all dead around you, and you're the only one left standing? What are you going to do when they use that moment to kill you?"

"I'm never going to let it get that far."

"How? With kind words and sympathetic glances? You're supposed to be the queen. Stop trying to be our friend!"

I stared into her soulless black eyes, and my anger fell away. "But you are my friend, Vix. I trust you."

"And when I'm the one holding the dagger against your throat?"

"You won't. You wouldn't do that."

She made a sound of frustration. "You can't trust anyone anymore. Why can't you see that?"

"I have ideas. I want to be able to protect myself properly, and I want more people like Bekind."

Her eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

I lowered my voice. "Spies, Vix. Bekind watches and listens and tells me what people are saying. But she's only got one pair of eyes. She can't be everywhere at once. And I know we don't exactly have a castle full of immortal cat ladies, but there have to be people who can and will work with us. I just need you to find them."

"Me?" She looked doubtful. "I thought my only job was to watch over Scarlet."

"And when she's older, that'll be a full-time job for somebody," I said. "But for now, it can be a cover for you. We need spies everywhere—in the kitchens, in the tribes, in the army, even in the other courts."

A slow, satisfied smile grew on Vix's face, revealing dimples that matched Sadler's. "That sounds more like it. You would really spy on them? Those men?"

I folded my arms across my chest. "You said it yourself, Vix. I can't trust anyone anymore. Not unless I have proof they're loyal, right?"

"You're playing me," she said with a laugh. "You're trying to distract me with this fresh new idea."

"Only a little." I grinned back. "But we do need help. And if the fae need a strong warrior queen, then that's what I'll be, but I'll also be smart and sneaky. So, are you in or out?"

A flicker of respect shone in her eyes. "When have I ever turned you down?"

# Chapter 8

On the day before the guests were due to arrive, a layer of apprehension covered us all. I could see it in the darted looks and sweaty brows of the workers and hear it in the whispered insults of the so-called elite. Everyone was in bad form, and I began to wonder if it was my nervous influence—because I was terrified. Not just of the ceremony or what would come afterward. I was absolutely shitting myself at the thought of seeing Brendan and Drake again. We weren't exactly on the best terms, no matter what their gifts might say. And if either of them turned against me, I was lost.

At dinner, Rat knocked over a pitcher of fruit juice. "I'll get another," she said as she hurriedly mopped it up.

"It's all right," I said.

She glanced at the table and shook her head. "It's only fair."

I shrugged and let her go. Scarlet sat next to me in a human safety seat attached to an old-fashioned faery chair, which looked kind of odd. Setanta was next to her in his new wheelchair, which we had recently procured from the human realm. The fae liked the strong and despised the weak, so I perversely wanted to take care of the weak to spite the strong. Fiadh was terrified of the wheelchair, but Setanta had quickly learned that he loved speed. Being carried around and babied wasn't good for him. He had come to life since he'd started spending so much time with Scarlet. Grey Eyes had even told me she suspected he would walk in a few years.

I chatted with him while gently persuading Scarlet that green vegetables were supposed to be swallowed rather than spat out in disgust. She ate a couple of peas with her preferred carrots, and I considered that a major win. I knew that those in court were doing their best to slip her sugary treats as soon as my back was turned. Whatever they felt about me, the court was in love with Scarlet for a number of reasons, least of which was the way she radiated joy, counteracting every negative emotion I was forcing on the room.

The dogs ran under the table, looking for scraps that might have fallen.

"Dog," Scarlet called, holding a piece of broccoli out to the black pup.

"No, that's yours." I shooed the pup away. "We really have to settle on names. I like Tristram and Iseult, but they're a bit of a mouthful."

"You could give them nicknames," Setanta offered.

"Tris and Issy perhaps," Líle said.

"They're just dogs," Realtín said, even as she stole meat from everyone's plates for the animals underfoot.

Grinning, I watched as the white pup waited patiently for her turn. But when the sprite threw the meat, the dog didn't even sniff it. For a second, I thought of poison. The pup sat down, held up her head, and let out a long, mournful howl. As one, we flinched at the sound.

"Somebody found her voice," Líle joked, but she looked unsettled.

But then the black pup growled at nothing. He joined in a second howl, and both of them screeched an awful wail that made my blood run cold. I had never heard anything like it before. Scarlet began to cry, a high-pitched shriek that sounded nothing like her. A glass on the table shattered, and a terrible dread clutched me.

"Death," somebody whispered.

"Where's Rat?" I asked sharply.

"She didn't come back from the kitchens," Vix said. Even she sounded troubled.

I rose to my feet. The pups stopped their howling and ran to the door. I followed, almost in a trance. I heard Rumble's armour clang as he moved after me, and other footsteps besides his, but I was too busy trying not to lose my dinner to figure out who the second person was. When I opened the door, the pups bolted as if they knew where they were going.

I ran along the corridor after them. They took two turns. Was it the kitchen? Had there been poison in the food after all?

But then a man stumbled out of a doorway ahead of me, closing his belt as he walked. His black hair was tussled, and long scratches had been dug into his cheek. The black pup growled at him while the white one ran into the room he had just left.

"Hold him here," I called out, pushing the startled man out of my way. I ran into the room with the pups and gasped.

Rat lay on the ground, her arms outstretched, and her legs akimbo. Her pink-tinged eyes were wide open and unseeing. Her neck had turned an ugly purple colour. Her cheek was swollen, and her clothes were in disarray. Rat had been the first to step over to my side, and now she was gone. Vix's words came to me—that the people who aligned themselves with me would die first.

"Rat," I whimpered, kneeling next to her. She was still warm, but no pulse beat in her neck. No thudding in her chest gave me hope. We hadn't had a chance at saving her. I closed her eyes, feeling the gamut of emotions, from pain and sorrow to anger and rage. This wasn't fair. This wasn't right. The fae had continually tested me, but this was too much. If they wanted a cruel faery queen, they could have her. I would use everything at my disposal to show them what I was capable of.

I got to my feet and turned slowly, black and red dots marring my vision. My grief had rapidly turned to an anger that manifested as a vibrating force around me, although I wasn't even sure if I was imagining it.

I left the room and found Rumble pinning the faery against the wall. I imagined my rage sparking and burning as I advanced on the man.

_"You_ ," I hissed in an unrecognisable voice. For once, I wished I were like a banshee, able to call death to me. But I was a queen, and I could call death in other ways. "What did you _do_?"

His expression of surprise turned to one of fear. "It wasn't on purpose. She got out of hand, and I put her in her place."

"In her place?" I said in the same dark tone. "She deserved this, did she?"

"Yes, but—"

I lashed my hand against his cheek so hard that my stomach turned with the shock of the pain vibrating through my wrist. My fingers clawed, my nails ripping his skin in the process, finishing the job that Rat must have started in self-defense.

He recoiled and covered his face with his hands. "You called us free men. Raised me up with the rest of the nameless. You said—"

"I never said _this_ ," I spat.

It was only then I noticed how many fae were surrounding us, eager to see what would happen next. Vix was right. I had to do something to make them understand that I couldn't be crossed. Poor Rat's life had been the cost of that lesson, and I was determined hers would be the last.

I breathed deeply and opened my palms as though releasing my anger. I hoped they all tasted it. "There are wooden stakes in the gardens," I said as calmly as I could manage. "The gardeners tried to use them for vines, but the vines died before the stakes were ever really needed."

The man nodded as if I were telling him a story. I swallowed my disgust and looked at Donncha. "Tie him to the stakes until I'm ready to deal with him." I looked back at Rat's body. "I need to take care of Rat first."

"But I didn't do anything wrong," the faery protested. "She was nobody. She was nothing. She was—"

"If he keeps talking, cut out his tongue." Even I was shocked by the venom in my words. I had to be a Darksider to earn the throne. I had to be a queen to keep it. It was too late to turn back. Hesitation would be our ruin.

Murmurs filled the hallway as Donncha and Oisín dragged the man outside. I didn't know what I was going to do to him, and I didn't care. It was Rat's time first.

Realtín was flying overhead, her light a deeper red than I had ever seen before. "Tell Vix and the others to bring Scarlet upstairs," I said. "Keep her up there."

Realtín hesitated before flying off, the dogs trying to keep up. I swallowed my grief as I looked at Rat again. She was so _small_. Her pink hair was untidy. She would hate that. I bent down, about to carry her myself, when the cook approached, milky tears running down her cheeks.

"I'll help carry her," she said. "She was just a... let me help."

I nodded, and between the two of us, we carried her body to the baths. More women followed, some I recognised, some I didn't. They watched over me as I cleaned her, and my sorrow must have leaked outward, because I heard more than one woman sob.

With all the tears, I couldn't see who was helping me prepare Rat's body. I chose a dress of my own for her to wear. I'd never worn it, but she had looked at it longingly more than once. I painted her nails a sparkling pink because that was the kind of thing that brought her joy.

It was my fault. My weakness had led to her death. I needed to make hard decisions. I needed to lead. And I needed to use every advantage I had over the fae. I needed to make them _feel_.

I let my grief and guilt spill outward and drench the entire castle. The fae were no longer sullen. Instead, I forced them to feel devastated. Brendan had said I'd been blocking my feelings, but now I was using them as a weapon. Since the Darksiders had begun pledging fealty, it had been so easy to douse them in my emotion. I'd tried not to because it had strange side effects sometimes, but in this case, it would be their punishment. _Their_ lesson.

And it had never been easier to share my influence. I knew I was making even my own friends suffer—everyone in the castle except Scarlet felt pain and regret because of me—but it was the only way to make them understand that I had a power they couldn't fight, a power I wasn't afraid to use. I wasn't going to grieve alone.

"What would she like to happen to her body?" I asked, finally wiping my face dry.

"She was afraid of being brought back," the cook said in a shaky voice. "She was afraid that a god like the one Sadler worshipped would use her. Necromancy, you know. I told her that god wouldn't want her, but she was afraid all the same. She'd want to be burned, in the old way, so her body would cease to exist."

"It has to be tonight then," I said. "Before the visitors invade."

"We'll take care of it," Thistle said gently, taking my hand. "You get something warm on. It's a cold evening."

I nodded, but I found a new fur cloak for Rat first. I wore my old cloak, the one the Watcher's wife had given to me on the way to free Brendan's soul.

In my room, Realtín was sobbing against Líle's neck. Grim called my name in a sorrowful voice.

"Don't," I snapped. "It's time _I_ picked a side, and I don't want to talk about it with you. Scarlet's asleep? Let her rest. We're going to say goodbye to Rat, and then I'm going to deal with the animal who did this to her."

"Good," Vix said viciously. I felt vicious myself.

Within an hour, I was standing in front of Rat's funeral pyre within the castle grounds. The wind whipped my cloak around me, biting at my skin as though it were made of glass. The weather had turned treacherous. The sky was a violet grey, and storm clouds hung overhead. Crows cawed, flying around us in circles.

Despite the wind, or perhaps because of it, the fire blazed almost out of control. Many of the fae retreated from the flames as if in terror, and I knew they saw the weather and the flames as omens, too. Sadler had often pushed his will on the weather, maybe unwittingly. I wondered what was causing this storm.

I stepped closer to the fire, so close that my skin threatened to sear. Rumble subtly held me back. I watched Rat burn, smelling the smoke and oils in the air, and my sorrow turned into an intense, dark rage the likes of which I had never felt before. Rat was innocent. Rat was gentle. Rat hadn't deserved to die.

The sky darkened, and the fire raged, and the flames of anger in my heart burned keenly. "You should go inside," I warned Rumble. "This isn't going to be pretty."

"I will never leave your side."

Something in his voice hit me like a hammer to the chest. I felt... but no, it was gone, and the rage returned. Every second I spent staring into Rat's funeral pyre fuelled my anger. The fae slowly began to retreat from me—all but Rumble. I didn't blame them. The anger kept growing, flying out of control as I seethed with it. And then it reached the point of no return, and my feet began to move.

Before I even realised what I was doing, I was striding into the gardens where the man who'd killed Rat had been uncomfortably tied to large pieces of wood. Those who dared, followed. I barely noticed them. All I could see was the man who had hurt Rat. He was one of the workers, and his muscles bulged as he strained against his restraints. I imagined him with Rat, towering over her, taking advantage of her, toying with her before killing her without remorse. And that hair. He was his father's son, and I would wipe his bad blood away. I wasn't thinking anymore, wasn't planning, wasn't even trying to survive. All I knew was that I wanted payback.

Somebody had taken my words seriously, it seemed. The man's mouth was full of blood, and although his lips moved, he formed no words I could understand. His tongue was gone, and I didn't feel an ounce of regret.

"You killed one of our own." I didn't have to speak loudly. My voice had taken on a life of its own, and it rang out so that everyone nearby could hear. "That makes you a traitor."

He shook his head, pleading with his eyes. But I saw Rat's eyes instead, and my anger deepened.

"You killed one my daughter loved." I gazed at him, throwing every ounce of my disgust into the stare. "And that makes you a fool."

I slid my dagger into his gut, and I twisted it, hoping that his pain was a thousand times worse than Rat's had been and that it lasted much longer. And as I watched the pain in his eyes, my anger melted away completely.

I could have asked for help. I could have told the fae to cut him down and save his life. But I didn't. I watched him bleed, and then I walked away, the Darksiders following in my wake. We left him to die alone, and I was glad.

At the doors of the castle, the pups began to howl, and I knew he was dead. I hesitated, feeling a tinge of regret, but deep down, I knew the truth: a queen could never hesitate. I could never hesitate again. And I would do whatever it took to control the fae so that Scarlet didn't have to.

When I washed the blood from my hands, I noticed that the blackness in my veins had spread to my wrists. I was well on my way to becoming the being I had seen in the mirror.

Rumble was the only one who followed me as I cleaned up. "Come with me," he said when I finished.

"Why?"

" _Please_."

I shrugged and followed, glad of the excuse to avoid returning to my room. I didn't want to face my old friends just yet, and I couldn't hold my daughter with death still fresh on my hands. Rumble led me to the back of the castle to older rooms so decayed they weren't in use.

"What's this about?" I asked warily.

"This used to be a training room," he said as he pulled a stuffed dummy into the centre of the room. He handed me a blunt sword.

"What's this for?"

He pointed at the dummy. "Kill it."

I shrugged and whacked the dummy with the sword. The thing was harder than it looked. I stabbed it through the chest, and some straw fell onto the floor. "Now what?"

"Keep killing it."

I threw the sword down in exasperation. "But why, Rumble?"

"You might have put on a scary display tonight for a reason, but I already warned you about controlling your temper. When Vix was a child, she was full of rage. Yes, even more so than now. She's tame compared to the feral wildcat she used to be. She suffered, and Sadler looked on without helping her because he wanted to make a monster out of her."

I winced. Poor Vix. She would despise my pity.

He gestured around the room. "I found her one day, spitting and hissing and cursing whenever anyone went near her. I decided to take care of her, and when I got to know her, I made her take her anger out on these dummies. She got stronger in mind, in body, and in spirit. She learned to focus her anger more wisely. Maybe this approach will help you, too."

"A miracle cure?" I scoffed. "I doubt it somehow."

"At least try. You wanted to be strong and be able to take care of yourself. Well, start with your own mind."

Tutting, I picked up the sword and started hitting. I saw everything I was angry about in that dummy, and I hit it until Rumble made me stop. By then, my arms were aching, and sweat rolled freely down my back.

"Okay," I panted. "It maybe helped a little. Take off the bloody helmet though, or I'll start hitting that next."

He hesitantly removed the helmet, letting me see his disfigured face. I reached out to touch his cheek. He flinched, but he stayed in place.

"Thank you," I said. "For helping, I mean."

"You're my queen."

"We're family. You're related to Scarlet. Stop acting as if you're not."

"By that standard, so is the man you killed today," he said. "He was Deorad's son, just as I was."

"I killed your brother."

"No, you killed Deorad's son. He's nothing to me, and he was nothing to Scarlet. But if you accept one of us as family, you'll be forced to take us all. Do you really want a man like that to claim a family connection with your child?"

I punched his arm and hurt my knuckles. "You're good at managing me without making me want to spit in your eye. If it wasn't tempting fate to marry yet another relative of Scarlet's, I'd think about making you marry me just to spite everyone else, Rumble."

He let out a surprised laugh. "Only if you wanted me to die young, my lady."

"There's that, too." I sighed heavily. "I'm sorry. I've let everything go too far. And right now, I'm too weak to be angry, so job well done, Mr. Bodyguard."

"Good. Take a bath, and then go to sleep. You'll need your rest. Tomorrow is a busy day."

"You should take the night off then. I think everyone's too upset to try and assassinate me tonight."

After my bath, I managed to grab a few minutes alone, so I took a bag of human possessions and headed up to the empty mirror room. The mirror was gone again, but Bart was sitting in the centre of the room.

"That was some display earlier," he commented.

"Go away, Bart," I said wearily. "I'm not in the mood for riddles or games."

He stood then bowed low. "Of course. What are your plans for this room, may I ask?"

"It's for me. Nobody is to come up here, including you."

"I see. Well, have a nice evening. We'll see what tomorrow brings."

When he left, I sat on the floor and took out a notebook and pen. Hitting things had gotten rid of the anger, but the sorrow was left behind with nothing to distract me from it. Maybe writing would help. I could turn the room into a kind of hall of shame, noting all of our mistakes, even mine.

Decided, I sat in the corner and wrote until my hand grew too tired. I wrote about the things that scared me and upset me and stressed me out. And I felt as though I'd released some of the bad feelings by the time I was finished.

I rolled up my sleeve and looked at the darkness in my veins, the way it had spread. Had my actions helped to spread it, or had the increasing darkness caused my actions? Maybe I would never know. A sound drew my attention, but it was only Bekind. The black cat jumped into my lap and let me cuddle her. Her purrs somehow calmed me, and I felt ready to sleep, hoping that the morning would bring us a better day.

# Chapter 9

Early the next morning, I addressed a subdued court. Even my old friends were on edge after my actions the previous day, so I made them remain with Scarlet while I spoke. There was an air of uneasiness that I needed to dispel before the guests arrived and a fear of my royal power to reinforce.

The realisation had come to me that I couldn't change the fae—instead, they had changed me. I was turning into a terrible person, and it had begun with Deorad's death. But if the fae feared me, Scarlet and I would be able to remain long enough for them to love her, and _she_ could change them.

"We need to clear up a few things," I said before the crowd. "Yesterday was a day I don't want to repeat. So don't force me to repeat it."

A few gasps of consternation followed, which I cut short with one decisive glare.

"If you want to stay with this court, there are rules you have to follow. You don't hurt each other or anyone else... _without permission_. If we're in a war, we fight. But turning on each other is the worst crime you can commit. Especially now, when two courts are on their way to inspect us."

I strode in front of them, catching the gaze of as many fae as possible. _All or nothing._ "We must wear our best faces if we don't want the other courts to think we're the waste of time they've always assumed us to be. This isn't just about me. This is when they decide if we're worth _life_. If you don't understand that, then listen well, because this week will be the judgement of us all. Swear fealty or don't, but never give them a chance to write you off. Yesterday happened in the presence of emissaries. Believe me when I say that it won't go unnoticed. We can't make another mistake like that. We have to show how worthy we are, and if we're going to fix this blight, then we have to work together with each other and with the other courts. That's my priority once the ceremony is over. We can't save the realm alone. Consider everything I've said. If you're still here tonight, then I'll assume you accept the rules set before you today. Now go. Impress them all."

I left the room abruptly to meet with Vix and Bekind. "I have to get ready," I said as we walked toward the baths. "But remember what I said about recruitment. They need to be intelligent and charming but, most of all, loyal and capable of defending themselves. And discretion is key."

"Don't worry," Vix drawled. "The numbers will grow. Our secret weapons will be ready when you need them."

The sound of horse hooves had us all rushing to the closest window. "Already?" I squeaked. "I'm not even close to being ready."

"Relax," Bekind said. "They can't see you until the ceremony, and you've plenty of time to get ready for that." She squeezed my hand. "We've made it perfect."

We had so many plans for the celebrations, but I had ignored the elephant in the room: the ceremony itself. I hadn't considered what it would take to go through with it, and what would happen if it went wrong and the Darksiders turned on me.

"Have I done enough? Will they behave?" I asked Vix urgently.

"Stop worrying. Everyone's terrified to make a wrong move after that little display last night." She made a face. "We really hate crying, you know."

"Good. I'll always hold that over your heads. Oh, God, I'm so nervous. I might throw up."

"Because of the ceremony or the kings?" Bekind asked slyly.

"Quiet, you." But at least she had made me smile.

We hurried to my tower room to fetch Líle and Scarlet. Grim and Realtín were already in their newly assigned room in the designated Green Court section of the castle, waiting for their peers to show up. I knew I wouldn't manage to grab another moment alone that day.

I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop—for some repercussion to occur—but everyone was too busy preparing for the ceremony to react to what I had done only a day before.

After bathing, I finally let some of the fae help me prepare. I would never manage the stupid corset on my own. I watched as Scarlet splashed in the water with a few servants, a huge smile on her face. That was what I had to remember. It was all for her. I wished Rat could have seen it. I could just imagine the wonder in her eyes as she took in the excitement of the day.

"Hold your breath," the seamstress ordered.

"I'd like to be able to breathe today."

"It's the one day." With a grunt, she yanked the strings of the corset tight. "You can change after the ceremony, but you must look your best this afternoon. The ceremony will name you as one of us, as a worthy ruler, so you had better look the part, young lady."

I laughed at her tone then sucked in my breath, groaning as the cords tightened.

"There. That's lovely now." She patted my backside. "You might even catch yourself a nice new husband."

"Are you _trying_ to ruin my day?"

Ignoring me, she prattled on. "And the weather's fine, too. It's a good sign. A great sign."

I glanced at the window. The storm clouds were gone, and the burning smell scarcely lingered in the air. I looked down at the dress. It was black, and heavy with layers, but the fabric was as translucent as a faery wing. The dress had no sleeves, so not only could people see my newly extended black veins, they would also see the green-and-silver bracelet I refused to remove. That might have been a mistake as well. In fact, the entire day was probably a mistake.

I anxiously scratched the inside of my forearm.

"Stay calm," Bekind said as a female faery brushed out her long golden hair. Bekind sat cross-legged in a chair, completely relaxed. As my ancestor, she was a part of the ceremony and had to be human and wear clothes for a change.

"I'm feeling the exact opposite of calm right now." I blew my fringe off my face. "It's the corset. It's too tight. I'll pass out in front of everybody then die of shame."

"The dress is fine, and if you pass out, you'll get back up and keep walking. This is happening, Cara. It's too late to back out now."

I made a yelp of alarm.

"I'll be right behind you with Scarlet," she said soothingly. "Everyone will be there."

That meant everyone except Zoe or my grandparents or even my mother. I touched my bare neck and thought of my brother. If he had lived, what would he think of his little sister now?

The seamstress added some sparkle to Bekind's hair, making it shine under the light from the window. "You look beautiful, Bek," I said in awe.

"Someone fetch my great-great-great-whatever-granddaughter a mirror, please," Bekind said, and there was affection in her eyes. " _You_ look like a queen."

I patted the back of my hair and posed. "Yeah, well, somebody has to." The pins holding up my complicated updo were already feeling stabby.

"The real star is the child," the seamstress said. "All that hair at her age, and she sits so nicely in her dress.

My daughter was looking very pleased with herself in her fancy new gown. The fae had curled her hair, and its silver patch looked like a decoration. Her large violet eyes gazed at everything in wonder. If only she had any idea of what I was getting us both into.

There was a knock at the door. "It's time," said Vix. "They're all waiting."

I swallowed hard, unable to force my feet to move.

"Get Rumble to carry her," Bekind said nastily. "That'll get her moving."

"Oh, shut up. I'm allowed to be nervous."

"You have nothing to be nervous about," Bekind said fiercely. "Nothing at all."

Easy for the immortal cat to say.

I stepped out of the room, trying to get used to the size of the skirt. Bekind followed, carrying Scarlet. Both wore black to signify their court.

"The shawl!" the seamstress cried. She ran after me to wrap a white shawl around me. "When you get to take this off, you really will be our queen. Now, good luck to you."

I took a calming breath then started the walk downstairs. Fae lined the stairwell, waiting for me. As I passed, they clapped. I kept my eyes straight ahead, focusing on walking without tumbling down the stairs. Scarlet giggled behind me, and the fae cooed over her. The dogs raced up and down the hallway as I headed for the main doors.

I stepped outside and took another deep breath.

"This is your time," Bekind whispered. "Don't be afraid, Cara."

"I can't help it."

Inside, I was panicking, and I was sure it was starting to show. Scores of faeries were waiting outside. I tried to find a familiar face but couldn't.

Beyond the crowds, a marquee had been set up. I was supposed to walk through everyone to get my crown. I reached the carpet that had been rolled out and froze to the spot. What was I doing? I was a human. I didn't know how to manage a kingdom. It was a dream, and it had turned into a nightmare.

Despite Bekind's urging, I couldn't bring myself to step onto the carpet. If I had been fae, the men in my family would have escorted me. But I had no one, and I wasn't sure how to take the first step.

Brendan came out of nowhere and took my arm. "You can do this," he murmured. "You can't stop now."

"I killed a man yesterday," I said, blinking to stop the tears from falling. "Rat is dead, and I killed the man who hurt her myself."

"We'll talk about it later," he promised.

"I won't make a good queen."

He looked down on me and smiled, the good smile that made it seem as if everything would be okay. "Yes, you will. True chaos will come if you walk away now. We need you to keep the Darksiders together. Drake and I need you to keep us in line, too."

I gazed at him. "You're mad at me though."

"It doesn't matter today. This is what the realm needs right now. This is what will be done."

"What if I screw it all up?"

"You won't. May I escort you?"

I inhaled sharply. "Yes, please."

"Then we should start walking. Today, preferably."

I bit back my smile as Drake approached. But his features were free of the haughtiness he liked to project, and his violet eyes were warm and encouraging. He greeted me with a rare _true_ smile, and it might have been Scarlet smiling back at me. "Come on," he said, taking my other arm. "Let's give the Darksiders their queen."

I gave him a grateful look. I hadn't expected help from either of them, but if they hadn't been by my side, I might not have been able to keep going.

"Everything is going to be fine," Drake said. "It will all work out."

I didn't try to work out what _it_ meant exactly, but my feet began to move. Fae stood as we passed them by, and I sensed approval in the air. The kings had given me their blessing when it counted. I could make it to the marquee. I gripped onto my friends as tightly as I dared as we walked, and before we reached the marquee, they slipped away to take their seats with their own subjects. I had to walk the rest of the way alone, but I was okay by that point. Brendan was right. There couldn't be any more upheaval. We couldn't afford it. We had a lot to fix.

Scarlet laughed again. I looked over my shoulder to see Bekind making faces at her. Smiling, I faced forward and finally stepped into the marquee. I recognised maybe one or two faces out of the twelve fae lined up in front of me. They were there to judge me, but they had been the ones who'd deemed Sadler worthy of his crown.

The hedge-witch was first.

"You care for Brighid's grotto," I said quickly under my breath. "Did the First Tree grow there?"

She made a sound of amusement. "Even I'm not so old as to remember that." She cut a branch from her hair and handed it to me. She smiled at Scarlet then nodded at me. "Good breeding."

I bit back a not-so-pleasant comment and moved on to the next fae. He turned his back on me. Grim had warned me it might be so. All I needed was for the majority of them to give their blessing.

Brendan had gone through an ordeal to become king, but Scarlet was blameless for my actions. As I would only be regent—a pliable one, many fae assumed—and none other had decided to stand against Scarlet, we could bypass the usual trials. I didn't think I would have managed otherwise.

I moved down the line. A tiny faery woman handed me a thimbleful of water, but her eyes were on Scarlet. In fact, everyone was more interested in my daughter than me, and that was a good thing. I was a means to an end, and most fae were grateful to be rid of Sadler after his threats against the realm. Still, if they knew more about me, they might not be so keen to accept my child.

Bekind had to help me carry the fae blessings. The next male faery handed me a thick, white candle. As he brushed against my fingers, the candle lit, and he nodded and let go. Next to him stood what looked like a child. She held out her palm to show me a flower. When I took it in my hand, she gripped my wrist to hold me still. The flower bloomed. She let me go without a word.

The next faery was a young woman with grave eyes, and hair that resembled a huge puff of orange candy floss. She studied me for a long time before cupping my face with her hand. She leaned in and surprised me with a long kiss. The kiss didn't end until the hedge-witch cleared her throat. The woman pulled away and kissed the top of my nose with a gleeful laugh.

I realised that no one was breathing. "What's the matter?" I couldn't help asking.

"We're waiting to see if she poisoned you or not," the next faery said, and he held out a golden coin. "Here—while we're waiting."

"Thank you. I'm feeling okay though."

"By the Goddess, why would I poison a queen who can kiss like that?" asked the faery with the cotton-candy hair.

The one with the coin rolled his eyes and shooed me down the line. More faeries turned their backs on me, and one even spat on the ground. But the last one gazed at me, her green-tinged face cocked to the side. "I'm the one who tells the secrets that wish to be heard. But as soon as they're spoken, the words are forgotten. Shall I tell you a secret?"

"Yes, please," I said.

She leaned in close and whispered, "Three kings prayed to three deities, and so a dying child survived."

Flustered, I moved to the end of the line so that Scarlet and I could complete the ceremony. The vote had been seven to five. We could proceed.

Bekind helped me remember the steps. She tied a black ribbon that joined my hand with Scarlet's. I kissed Scarlet's cheek and then, on a whim, kissed Bekind's, too. "May your people love you." I placed the coin in Scarlet's pocket and said, "May your people be rich in the things they need." I pinned the flower into her hair. "May your lands grow in abundance." I whispered the secret into her ear and forgot the words as soon as I had spoken them.

"My mouth will speak for yours. My hands will toil for yours. My mind will think for yours. My actions will perform for yours. And when your time comes, I will stand back and let you soar." I broke the branch in half and gave the larger piece to Scarlet. Unsurprisingly, she tried to chew on it.

Bekind used the candle to light the ribbon. As soon as it began to burn, she used the thimble to douse the flame. "May the elements be at your will."

She led us to our seats. I sat next to Scarlet and waited. Bekind laid my old black crown on my head. She laid a crown made of black roses and Brighid's flowers on Scarlet's head. A gust of wind blew against us, but the crowns remained in place, and the crowd breathed a sigh of relief. The gods didn't object, either.

Bekind knelt low at my feet and renewed her pledge of fealty. She kissed Scarlet's hand and moved on. One by one, the Darksiders came to kneel before us. Each of them gave Scarlet a kiss, and most of them missed the flicker of darkness swirling across the back of her hand. But two of them gave her hand a second look: Setanta and Bart. Setanta smiled at Scarlet then at me with a shrewd look in his eyes. Bart's smile unsettled me in ways I couldn't even explain. But he didn't say a word.

The other courts didn't kneel at my feet, but they brought more gifts and laid them close by. Drake brought seedlings for the gardens. Brendan brought a black rose bush. I made up my mind to somehow involve Scarlet in the planting to see if she made a difference.

I sat in that chair for so long that my backside ached. I barely noticed what happened next. The ceremony continued, and too many words were said. When the words were spoken, the entire crowd went silent. Rafe laid his hand on my shoulder, removed the white shawl, and officially declared me Queen Regent of the Chaos Court. A strange sensation ran through my body. I thought it was nerves, and the rest of the ceremony moved so quickly that I didn't give it much thought.

When it was finally over, a procession of female fae led us back into the castle. I looked for Drake and Brendan in the crowd, but I couldn't find them because most of the fae were on their feet, clapping respectfully.

Inside, I collapsed into a chair. "It's over," I said, relieved.

"We've a party to go to," Bekind said.

"Dinner first," I said with a groan. "Then Scarlet's bedtime."

We moved to our room upstairs to get more comfortable. Mostly, I needed to loosen the bloody corset.

"So," I said. "How did I do?"

"You were perfect," Bekind said sincerely.

"It did go well," Vix said with a sly grin. "And who are you passing that kiss on to? Because you certainly didn't give it away during the ceremony."

"Funny." I was too tired to think of anything else to say.

"It was a good sign," Rumble said.

"I can't remember the secret," I said, feeling frustrated.

"A pity," Bekind said. "By your expression, it was a juicy one."

"It was well of the kings to escort you," Vix conceded. "And a good sign for what's to come."

Scarlet sneezed loudly, drawing attention away from me. Until dinner, the others chattered excitedly about the success of the event, but I sat there thinking, "What the hell have I done?"

# Chapter 10

Dinner lasted for hours. At first, the room had been divided into three sections, one for each court. The tables in each section were pushed close together, but as the night wore on, the courts began to mingle.

I was surrounded by Darksider elites, the cream of the crop—at least, according to them. And it was the dullest conversation I had ever witnessed. I struggled not to yawn as I pushed food around my plate, eyeing a glass of golden wine with longing. The room was sweltering, and the noise levels kept increasing. Every Darksider took the opportunity to fawn over Scarlet, who sat in a seat next to me and giggled every time a person so much as bowed in front of her.

She sneezed a couple more times. As I wiped her nose clean, I surreptitiously watched my acquaintances from both of the other courts. Neither king looked exactly happy, but at least my old friends seemed to be enjoying themselves.

The food before me looked amazing, but I knew there were plenty of faeries in the kitchen who'd be stuffing themselves with the leftovers. We'd only have one night for feasting, but I was more concerned with landslides and sinkholes than various roasted animals.

A gentle hand tapped my shoulder. I looked around, and Anya was standing there, looking shy.

"Hey," I said. "I thought you would have come over sooner."

"I had to wait." She looked at Scarlet longingly. "Is she well?"

"See for yourself," I said, puzzled by her reticence.

"May I?"

I nodded, and the bronze-skinned pixie knelt by Scarlet's seat and kissed her hand. The child gave a smile of delight and pushed wet baby kisses against Anya's face.

"Oh, she looks so beautiful," Anya cooed. "And so big, too."

"She's missed you," I said. "I'm sorry about what happened, Anya. I wish we could all be together, but..."

She sighed. "Nothing will ever be the way it was."

I avoided my instinctual glance at a king. "I know. But maybe things can get better."

She bit her lip. "May I take care of her for a time? She looks exhausted. I could put her to bed and watch over her."

I tried to smile. Even my friends were more interested in Scarlet than in me these days. "After dinner, you can take her to my room. It's too loud in here for her, and it's only going to get worse. Vix and Orlaith can go with you."

"Two bodyguards?" She smiled. "Is that necessary?"

I thought of Rat, and any humour in my expression dropped. "Yes."

Startled, she backed away, nodding. "I'll be with... my court."

I held her gaze for a few seconds before she turned her back on me. I looked at Scarlet as she let out another sneeze. She had eaten some dinner, but she really did look tired.

"Do you want to go to bed?" I asked her.

She raised her arms to me in answer.

"Will Anya put you to bed?" I asked as I snuggled her.

"Na-Na," she said, making me smile. She had sounds for everything now. Sometimes I worried I didn't talk to her enough, but then I'd hear Setanta chatting away, and I knew she would always have someone teaching her words.

I stood, nodded at Rumble and Vix, and slowly made my way to the Green Court section. My entire table rose, too, and most of the room watched me. I knew that there were guards everywhere, but I still felt like a target as I held Scarlet close.

The pups followed at my heels. I had been the one feeding them because I was afraid the fae would forget, and the dogs had become attached to me. They saw the children as playmates, but despite being double the size they had been on their arrival, the pups were always careful not to hurt the children.

I saw Arlen walking between the tables and smiled, but he returned a withering glare. Apparently, he hadn't forgiven me for taking the Darkside from Brendan. Or for coming between him and Anya.

Anya waved me over. She was sitting next to Líle amidst a number of empty seats as her companions mingled.

"She's going to fall asleep on her plate if I don't send her up to bed soon," I told Anya with a smile. "I think she's coming down with a cold. But finish your dessert. I'll wait here, if you don't mind."

Anya beamed. "You're always welcome with us, Cara. No matter—"

Her voice died away as Drake casually joined us at the table. A brief panic struck me as I felt people staring, but Drake's expression was mild and unthreatening. "The dogs look well." He ran his hand over the white pup's head.

"Oh. Thank you for them." Why did every exchange with him have to feel so _awkward_? "You shouldn't have gone to so much trouble though. I heard they're rare."

"I wanted one for myself. And when I sent out word, both arrived from two different breeders in a short time. They got on so well, and when I saw them together, I thought..." He looked away, pink dotting the centres of his cheeks.

"Scarlet loves them." I kept my voice flat. I had only recently threatened his life, and I was pretty sure he had seriously considered taking Scarlet from me.

"I'm glad." He cleared his throat and nodded at her. "She must be tired."

"Yeah, it's past her bedtime."

Scarlet's head was against my shoulder, and I knew she had been staring at Drake, but when she reached out her hand to touch him, even I was surprised. He froze, a mixture of longing and fear on his face. Scarlet's fingers flexed as if she were asking him to take her hand, but he didn't move. My stomach sank at his open rejection of our daughter.

Brendan appeared out of nowhere and took Scarlet's hand instead.

"And here's where the little butterfly's been hiding," he practically bellowed. He rubbed her palm against the stubble on his jaw, sending Scarlet into hysterical giggles. He took her out of my arms and held her up high, making her body twist with delight.

"Oh, no," Anya said crossly. "Don't get her overexcited right before bedtime."

"Did you hear that?" Brendan asked Scarlet, handing her to Anya. "Even kings get told off in this court." He patted my daughter's head before taking his seat at the table.

I turned to Drake. His mouth was opening and closing as though he were trying to find words that didn't exist.

"Well," I said. "Enjoy your dinner."

He gripped my arm then let go just as suddenly. "I'm sorry."

I wasn't sure what he was apologising for, but I was feeling a little guilty myself. "Just so you know, I wouldn't have used the sword."

His thin smile made me uncomfortable. "I was hoping we could talk tomorrow."

I nodded, feeling my cheeks burn for no real reason. "Of course. I, um, I should say goodnight to Scarlet before Anya kidnaps her."

He nodded, and he looked almost exactly like the faery I had first met. But his beautiful wings were folded inside his clothes, and as he walked away, I saw them move as if desperately trying to free themselves. I pitied him for creating his own prison.

Scarlet was being doted on by Anya and those around her. "She's grown so much," Anya said, her eyes shining. "I almost didn't recognise her."

"She's growing fast," I said. "I expected her not to."

"Never expect anything in the faery realm," Brendan said lazily from his seat at the head of the table. "Or didn't you know?"

A woman with mermaid-length lavender hair touched Brendan's arm. "She'll learn."

I gazed at the woman, trying to place her. Nobody introduced her, but her words seemed to kill the conversation.

"Well," I said, confused. "It's Scarlet's bedtime. Anya, I'll walk you upstairs." I gestured at Orlaith to let her know she was needed upstairs, then Anya and I headed away from the dinner.

Realtín perched on my shoulder. "Don't worry, Cara. I'll take care of Scarlet when the pixie is too stupid to notice her running away."

Anya's cheeks deepened in colour. "That was cruel, Realtín. You know I take good care of Scarlet."

Realtín's only reply was a mischievous cackle. She really could be mean, but I still loved her.

"Okay," I said under my breath. "You won't be alone in the room. Orlaith and Vix will be there, and the dogs, too."

Realtín groaned. "Not the dogs."

"Yes, the dogs. Now, if they howl, lock the door. Don't even ask. Just do it. And Realtín, please don't bother Vix. I love you too much to see you squashed under her shoe."

"She wouldn't catch me," Realtín said, flickering red and gold.

"Don't even risk it. Hey, who was that woman back there?"

Anya and Realtín exchanged a glance.

"What?" I said. "Should I know her?"

Anya shook her head. "The lineage consultant made some arrangements before he died. It seems some of them didn't end with his death."

Realtín pinched my neck. "Yvette is the willing bride up for sale. If Brendan makes her a queen, her family will be his biggest, richest supporters. And if he doesn't, then Drake will have some new best friends."

I glanced over my shoulder. "Ah. That's the one Grim mentioned. So, is he engaged now?" It surprised me how sick I felt.

"Brendan's pretending he doesn't understand the rules of this game," Anya said. "But Yvette's pixies have told the entire court what will happen. Brendan can't not know."

"Good thing I don't need him to protect Scarlet anymore," I said as lightly as I could manage.

"It's a great deal more serious than that," Realtín said.

I tried to laugh it off. "It'll make no difference to me."

"Has Drake been much of a friend to you since he married?" Realtín asked. "Do you think Brendan's wife will be any different?"

I looked at Anya for confirmation.

"Life will change," was all she said.

The thought of both kings acting like Drake made a shiver run down my spine.

# Chapter 11

I stepped into the hall alone. The noise was almost deafening. Dinner was over, and the party's music had already started. The musicians played songs I knew, but that just reminded me of a time when Brendan had done the same thing. I shivered as I looked around the room. Maybe the others were right. Maybe I would lose another friend. Maybe that was why I felt so alone.

It was too hot. My fringe stuck to my forehead. I grabbed a goblet of wine from a passing tray and took one sip. The golden wine warmed my tongue and my insides, but the whispers around me grew louder.

"She can influence the kings, and we'll..."

"One of them will kill her soon enough..."

"Who will really lead?"

"Whoever controls the child, controls the..."

"She's a witch. That's what we..."

I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. When I opened them, the room appeared clearer. I shoved the cup into the hand of the faery next to me. He stuttered something in response, but I was already leaving.

I strode across the hall as if I owned the place. And apparently, I did. But maybe the fae had chosen me because I was replaceable and suggestible. When I looked at the group of Darksiders in the centre of the room, I saw no friendly faces.

I headed to my throne instead of joining them. Rumble was nearby, but he was walking through the crowds, listening to what was being said. I didn't envy him. The thrones were at least comfortable now. Somebody had decorated them with flowers, and the smell grew sickening as the petals slowly decayed. I gripped the arms of the chair and held on as the room spun.

I breathed through my mouth and watched the room, trying to pick out familiar faces. Drake and Sorcha sat side by side. They barely spoke and never smiled. My ancestor, the leanan sídhe called Donella, was nowhere to be seen, possibly because she was out of favour but more likely because she resented me accomplishing what she couldn't. Bekind, my other ancestor, had gone missing again. I wished, just for one day, she had stuck by my side and made me feel less alone.

I kept searching the faces around me. Dymphna and Fiadh were having a discussion in the corner of the room. I briefly wondered where their children were. I caught Bran's eye and waved, pleased to see him looking well and as pastel coloured as always. He bowed, but he gave me a sly wink. Grim and Líle were speaking together at the side of the room. They both looked worried. They glanced over at me then turned away just as quickly. Even my old friends were becoming secretive with me. Could I trust anyone anymore?

And then I found the face I had been saving for last. Brendan was holding court at his table, his hand on Arlen's shoulder as he regaled those around him with one of his many charming stories. He had barely spoken to me since he arrived. I missed the way we used to be comfortable together on occasions like these, when I'd sit by his side, trying not to laugh as he kept me amused. And now it was over.

A voice loudly called out for silence, and I was forced to look away to find out what was going on. The musicians had stopped playing, and everyone was looking at the group of beautiful faery women posed in front of them.

The woman with lavender hair, Yvette, stretched out her arms with a smile. "Where I come from, women are trained in many arts."

I frowned. And that meant what exactly?

"Many of you have never met me before because our fathers keep us secluded for as long as possible." She glanced at the woman to her right and smiled. "So, we prepared a little introduction, a gift for the newly crowned... regent." She looked at me, and her smile was calculating. "May your daughter's reign be long and peaceful."

Why did that sound so threatening? My fingers clenched the arms of the chair.

The musicians played a different melody then, one I didn't recognise. Yvette slipped her dress off her shoulders along with the rest of her group. Under their clothes, the women all wore silky material that was wrapped around their bodies in strips, revealing enough skin to display their tattoos.

Yvette led the others in a seductive dance, making serpent-like movements as she approached the tables. The women spread out, drawing attention from the closest tables. Yvette made a beeline for Brendan. He watched her, entranced, and my stomach threatened to heave. As Yvette danced, her tattoos seemed to swirl, and her movements grew more and more sensual until I couldn't look anymore.

As I gazed about the room, I saw that almost all the fae were as entranced as Brendan. Rumble was ever watchful. Bart and the glaistig were having some kind of argument in the back of the room. She stamped her cloven feet before storming off.

And Drake was staring at me. He caught my eye and lifted his shoulders in a shrug, a bemused look on his face.

I mouthed the words, "What the hell?"

He grinned mischievously and mouthed back, "Should we get them a room?"

I snorted with laughter, breaking the trance. As all eyes turned to me, I covered my laughter, pretending to cough politely instead. Brendan glared at me, and I hurriedly waved at Yvette to carry on. Her shrewd gaze chilled me so much that I had to look away.

Bart moved to my side with another goblet of wine. "You look as though you need something to get you through this."

"Am I that obvious?"

"You're one of the more transparent people here. It's refreshing, no?"

I stared at him. He was one of the most interesting faeries I had ever met. His skin was blacker than any other shade in the Darkside, and his overly large pupils were surrounded by sky blue instead of the chilling white that had once been there. His back wasn't as hunched as it had been when Sadler ruled, but nobody else seemed to be aware of the changes. And he had saved my life.

"Well, you're right." I took the cup from his hands. "This isn't how I expected tonight to be."

His fingers stayed my hand. "Don't drink too fast. It takes getting used to."

I smirked. "Don't I know it." I pulled my hand out of his grip. "Aren't _you_ enjoying the show, Bart?"

He sneered as he looked over at Yvette's renewed efforts. "In some places, this kind of show is a last-ditch effort."

"What kind of place is she from?"

He hesitated, his eyes changing colour as I watched. "A place long forgotten." He sounded mournful.

"Do you know her or something?"

He shook himself out of his sudden sombre moment. "Of course not."

I observed him over the edge of my cup, interested in finding out more about him. "Where are _you_ from then?"

His gaze snapped to mine, his eyes alight with amusement. "Somewhere you'll never go. Think yourself lucky."

"Am I ever going to earn your story?" I meant to tease, but the words came out sounding serious.

He frowned. "Not every story should be heard." He looked up at my crown. "Is it as heavy as they say?"

"They don't exaggerate." I tried to smile, but my faery-wine buzz was fast dissipating. I gazed at the cup in my hand. Maybe one more sip.

"Cara," Bart said gently.

I looked at him, wondering if I had missed something.

"Nothing," he said after a moment. "It matters not." He bowed low then, and it felt mocking. "Enjoy the celebrations. I'm sure you'll want to make this night last. After all, tomorrow the real business begins."

I took an absentminded sip as I watched Bart walk away. He frequently left me feeling as though I were missing some very important piece of information.

Bored, I nibbled on grapes from the plate next to me. My next sip of wine was interrupted by Rumble. He took the cup from my hands. "Don't trust everyone who speaks sweetly to you."

"Bart?" I fanned my face. "He saved my life when I escaped from Sadler. He got me out of here and almost died doing it."

He beckoned a servant over to take the cup away. I blinked as a haze came over me. My fingers started to feel uncomfortably numb.

"Sometimes even bad deeds work in your favour," Rumble was saying, but the words echoed around me.

The heat became claustrophobic, and Yvette's music gave me a headache. The way she pawed at Brendan made me want to vomit. He turned to look at me and frowned. Had I said it out loud or something? Then a flash of silver hair got in the way as Drake spoke to Brendan. The dance continued, but the movements made me feel seasick.

"I need some air," I muttered.

Rumble's hands were gentle as he helped me up. "Some air." He sounded far away. "And then you must sleep."

"I don't want to sleep," I said, trying to push him away—to no avail. "I need to celebrate. Tomorrow we have to fix the realm."

Rumble sighed and muttered something under his breath. He urged me toward the doors. I heard concerned voices, but Rumble sent them all away.

I stumbled outside, and the cool air hit me like a slap. I shivered, but the heat of the wine kept the worst of the chill away. Rumble steered me away from the soldiers and toward the gardens. I leaned on him at first, but his grip on me was too strong. I felt suffocated. "Let me go."

"If I let you go, you'll fall."

"I won't fall. I know how to walk, Rumble. Comhaill. Rumble. Comhaill-Rumble. Rumble suits you better."

"As you say."

We reached Brighid's flower. I squeezed out of Rumble's grasp and half fell into the dirt. I pretended I had intended to do that and sank my fingers into the soil. "How is she supposed to fix _this_?"

"Who?" Rumble asked.

"Um, Scarlet?" I threw a clump of dirt at him for being so stupid. "My daughter's magical, but how can a baby clean all of this? What is she supposed to do? Chew every bit of dirt and spit it out like some kind of... some kind of human-faery earthworm?"

Rumble was staring at me as if I had lost my mind.

"Oh, forget it," I muttered. "I hate this stupid flower. It causes all of my problems." I reached out to touch the petals. Maybe it hadn't caused _all_ of my problems. "I'm human," I told the flower. "How can a child be so powerful if her mother is just a human? What did you _do_ to her?"

"We should go inside. Before anyone hears you."

"Hears me, shmears me," I rattled off.

"How did this happen?" Rumble muttered to himself.

I let him help me to my feet, but then I stumbled away from his side, my limbs strangely heavy. I ran from the castle, gasping for air because the wine had made my lungs constrict into dry, shrivelled things incapable of taking a deep breath.

Rumble called out for me to stop, but I spun in a circle instead, my arms stretched out wide. Oh, God. Drake couldn't let himself love Scarlet, and Brendan was going to get married to a bitchy mermaid with legs, and everyone expected me to stop the blight, but it was really Scarlet. She had to save us all. My stomach flipped over, and I ran to escape my fear.

I came to a sudden stop, terrified of what was going to come next. Even though I stood still, the world kept spinning. It lurched upside down and made the ground smack me in the face. I gasped against the grass as a sharp pain twisted my ankle.

Rumble swore and came to get me, so I scrambled onto my hands and knees and crawled until the wine lovingly wrapped around the pain and made it go away. Why was Rumble so slow, anyway? I glanced over my shoulder. He was keeping his distance as though afraid to come too close.

Well, screw that. I got up and ran, knowing nobody could catch me, and I laughed, but I couldn't remember what was funny. It didn't matter.

I stopped when I came to the pond. Ronnie had been there before—a human tortured by the fae until she lost her mind and was sent back, rejected. She'd been jealous of me because I was kept longer. I wondered where she was and whether she'd died. Would I turn into her?

I didn't care anymore, but my feet burned, and the water looked cool and inviting. I slipped off my shoes and lifted my skirts then stepped into the pond. The mud squished pleasantly between my toes. I heard voices arguing in the distance. Stupid voices.

Yawning, I decided I was too tired to take another step, so I sat on the grass, my feet still in the water. I lay back and gazed up at the lilac moon, my fingers twisting the blades of grass at my side.

"The moon is always the same," I murmured. "It never changes." But I changed.

"Cara." Brendan's voice spoke harshly.

I squinted as he peered over me. "How did you do that? How did you turn into _him_?"

He frowned, and it looked funny upside-down. I giggled again, wrapping my arms around myself.

"What happened to her?" he asked somebody behind him. "I've never witnessed wine having _this_ effect on her before."

"Only two sips that I noticed," Rumble's voice said. "It's likely there was something else in the wine."

"Who would dare? She's sneaky when she's feeling stubborn. She may have had more than you thought."

"Aaaah, there are two of you." I giggled at the sound of my own voice.

"This isn't funny," Brendan said sharply.

"Oh, boo," I said. "Maybe tomorrow, I'll help you find your sense of humour."

"It's time to go inside," he said.

"Nope. I'm the queen. I don't even have a bedtime."

Brendan made a sound of exasperation. "This isn't the way it goes."

"I'd take her inside," Rumble said, "but it's getting stronger. I don't trust myself."

"I'll take her in," Brendan said.

"I don't trust you, either."

"I'm used to it. She has nothing to fear from me."

"What are you even talking about?" I kicked the water and winced. "Stop keeping secrets, everyone."

Brendan knelt next to me and sighed. "You hurt yourself."

"No, I didn't." I turned to look at him more closely. I felt tiny next to him.

He brushed my bangs off my face. His hands were gentle. I held his gaze. I had always liked how he looked. Something warm grew in my chest, and it made me smile.

His oversized pupils enlarged until I could barely see the green. "Stop doing that, Cara."

"I'm just cooling my feet," I said indignantly. "What's wrong with that?"

"You're _feeling_ entirely too loudly."

"I don't feel, remember? Make up your mind." I stretched my arms into the air. I couldn't even feel the wind anymore.

"I'm going to take you inside now."

"I don't feel like walking."

"Then I'll just have to carry you."

"No, thank you," I said brightly.

Muttering under his breath, Brendan heaved me into the air and against his chest. It wasn't so bad there, so I curled up against him, sleepy and happy.

"This is bad," Brendan said. "Go on ahead. Clear the top floor, and make sure nobody gets past you."

"Understood," Rumble said. "We'll watch the stairs. That woman will be enough of a distraction for a time."

"Hurry. She's shivering." Everything went quiet, and Brendan held me tighter. "You're so cold," he whispered.

I was warm, or at least, I thought I was. But when I looked at my hands, they trembled, and they looked bluish under the moon's light. I opened the top buttons of Brendan's shirt and slipped my hands inside to warm my fingers before they froze right off. He inhaled sharply as my cold hands touched his warm skin. His heartbeat was steady and soothing and loud, and I relaxed completely, my mind empty of everything but the beating of his heart.

Next thing I knew, I was in a bed being covered by a blanket. I reached for Brendan and pulled him close. "Where did you go?"

"I'm right here," he said, bemused.

"Oh. I'm glad. I like your face." I touched his hand. "And your hands."

He arched his eyebrows. "Thank you. I like your face, too." His fingers closed around mine. Everything was going to be okay.

"I just remembered. You have to help me fix everything."

"Fix what?"

"The blight. You and Drake have to stop hating me and each other, or everyone will die. Promise you'll help me."

"I promise."

I felt sleepy and yawned. "Vix said I had to pass it on."

"Pass what on?"

I kissed him. "You taste like summer."

"And you taste like trouble." But his eyes sparkled with humour.

"I _am_ trouble. I did something bad."

"We've all done bad things."

I blinked. "Bekind told me it was Donella's idea, what you did to Sadler's wife. So, it wasn't even your fault."

"No," Brendan said softly. "That was all my fault. Never forget it."

"Yeah, well, I did lots of somethings bad. But I did them for Scarlet. Does that make it better?"

"When are you going to start doing things for yourself?"

I sat up. "Anya says... she said that everyone here turns bad without something to anchor them."

"Stop listening to what other people say."

My stomach was turning again. "But what if it's true?"

He made me lie down again. "Don't you remember? We agreed to keep each other's feet on the ground. You have nothing to worry about."

Sighing, I traced the scar on his forehead then held him still while I kissed him. The world spun again, but this time I liked it.

He broke away. "Go to _sleep_ , Cara."

I could barely keep my eyes open. "Fine. Go get a lap dance off your new best friend."

"Foolish girl," Brendan whispered, pulling the blanket up to my chin. The last sound I heard was his laughter.

I woke up with a fright, unable to figure out where I was. I sat up slowly because the room was spinning. Something was on the tip of my tongue, something I was supposed to remember. There was water on the bedside table, and I drank heavily. I ate some grapes and felt different. Not better. Just different. I was in somebody else's room, but I was fully dressed. I searched for clues and found Brendan's clothes. I vaguely remembered speaking to him. Snatches of memories returned, but my head was too hazy to figure them out.

My ankle hurt, I realised, and I saw that it had been wrapped in a bandage. I lifted my leg and twisted my foot. There was a pain, but it was numb and distant, and I couldn't bring myself to care. I left the room, expecting to walk into a soldier. The hall was empty—no, not completely empty.

Voices came from close by. Limping, I followed the sound until I saw Brendan and Drake playing a form of chess in an alcove. The alcoves, once empty, had been prettied up. There were paintings on the walls, I noticed, reaching up to touch them as I passed. The men stopped speaking as I neared. I was too entranced by the images to pay them any mind. Places I had never seen, faces I didn't know—so many stories must have lain behind the pictures.

That reminded me of something, and I stopped, frowning, trying to figure it out. But it was gone, just like every other thought that flitted in and out of my brain. That wasn't right, but it was hard to worry when a smooth, warm feeling engulfed my entire body.

I reached the alcove and brushed against Drake. He held my arm. I thought he was looking at the bracelet, but he brushed his lips against the black veins that had reached my wrist.

"What have we done to you?" he murmured, agony in his gaze.

"Don't touch her," Brendan said sharply. "It's worse when you touch her skin."

I pulled out of Drake's grasp and moved to Brendan. He looked anywhere but right at me. I sat on his lap to spite him.

"Who's winning?" I demanded.

"The queen," Brendan said, and I heard the smile in his voice.

"That's wrong then," I said. "Didn't you know? The queens always lose here."

"Trust me when I tell you the kings aren't winning," he said so quietly that I barely heard him.

"At least you aren't killing each other," I murmured.

"For now."

I met Drake's eyes with a venomous glare.

"Don't _look_ at me like that," he pleaded.

Ignoring him, I held up my hand and stretched my fingers. The black diamond on my ring finger didn't shine. It looked matte.

"Isn't it weird?" I said, laughing when I wanted to cry. "Sadler gave me this because I made him remember the rules. What a strange little man he is. It's so heavy, but I can't take it off."

"Why?" Brendan asked. "Why are you still wearing it?"

"If I take it off, I might forget."

He looked down at me. "What will you forget?"

His face blurred in front of my eyes. I tried to touch him, but he brushed my hand away.

"Is this a dream?"

"You drank too much wine," Brendan said.

"Why did you drink so much?" Drake asked accusingly.

"I drank more the first time. I drank a whole cup back then."

"I remember," he said. "And you weren't like this."

"Her guard didn't see her drink that much," Brendan said slowly. "He mentioned the idea that something else was in the wine, but I thought he was just protecting her."

Drake's wings fluttered. "If that's true..." He said something I didn't hear.

I blinked at him. He was so pretty that I smiled. "Your wings," I said triumphantly. "You're not hiding them."

He exchanged a weary look with Brendan. "It's not wearing off."

"Soon," Brendan said. "She needs more sleep."

His fingers on my waist burned though my clothes and into my skin. I sighed and relaxed. I liked the wine. It made everything come to the surface.

Drake stood, his eyes sparking with anger. "I'll take her back. In the morning, it'll be over."

"Where's Rumble?" I demanded. "What did you do to Rumble? He's supposed to keep me safe. When they force me to marry, I'm going to marry _him_."

"You are safe," Brendan said, pushing me off his lap. "Rumble's keeping them all away."

"Who?" I frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"You feel too much," Brendan said. "It'll be over in the morning."

I brushed the pieces off the board. "Nobody makes _sense_ anymore."

"Is it just me, or is it getting worse?" Drake asked.

Brendan's eyes were dilating again. "You're right. Did you drink more wine, Cara?"

"There's no wine anywhere. Stop talking about the wine. I drank the water and ate the grapes."

Brendan froze. "What grapes?"

"The ones next to the water."

Brendan looked at Drake. "I saw none."

"Perhaps she's dreaming. If not, who could have put them there?"

"One of yours or hers."

"Or yours," Drake said. "It wouldn't be the first time you tried to trick her."

Brendan winced. "Don't. I wouldn't hurt her. I learned."

"We both know the truth though, don't we?" Drake took my hand. "Let's go."

"Where are we going?" I looked over my shoulder. Brendan was far away already. Something was wrong, but I couldn't figure out what. Drake squeezed my fingers.

We walked for a long time, but everything looked the same. Drake's hands were warm. The warmth spread from my fingers up my arms and all through my body. I tripped, and he held me up, his gaze firmly set on me.

"Drake," I said, seeing violet eyes instead of emerald green. "You're back."

Then we were in another alcove, a darker one, and Drake's lips were against my neck. He held me tight, and I couldn't breathe.

"What's happening?" I asked in a small voice. Something was wrong. Something was _not_ right.

"Quiet," he whispered. "They'll know." When he looked at me, his eyes were glazed over, just like the first time we kissed.

I kissed him back. He would save me. He would get me outside before the smiling faery killed me. I just had to stop eating the apples.

Apples? My hands clutched at him, and he pressed me against the wall, murmuring against my lips.

We were in Brendan's bed, in a pocket of magic in the human realm, and everything was perfect. But no, that wasn't right. We were on the way to the Fade to _find_ Brendan, and Drake was almost mine again. He gasped against me. But didn't Brendan come home from the Fade?

We were on horseback, rushing to safety, and Drake was telling me he loved me; he would always love me. Then he used my true name to send me away.

I let out a sharp cry and pushed him away. Drake grabbed me fiercely, his fingers ripping my bodice as he ran his tongue across my breasts. What was it I had to remember?

He married Sorcha. He was married. We had a daughter that he didn't call his own. And I didn't _love_ him.

"No," I murmured. "This isn't a dream."

And even if it was, I didn't want the snatches of stolen affection he could give me. Time fast-forwarded in my mind as memories raced. Brendan and Drake and I. I had left, and then I'd come back and changed everything. I couldn't go back again—not to a time of feeling inadequate. I needed to feel good enough.

He pressed his lips against mine, his tongue forcing its way into his mouth. _Sorcha_.

I bit him until he let me go. "Stop it! She loves you," I gasped. "And I _don't_." I pushed him aside and ran from him. I looked back and saw Deorad's face, heard Sadler's voice. With a cry of fear, I raced around the corner and right into Brendan.

"Sadler's going to kill me," I whispered. "We have to run!"

"Sadler's dead." He held my face in his hands. "He's dead, Cara."

"I knew that." I held on to him, shaking, as clarity broke through the madness. "What's happening to me?"

"I don't know," he said. "Maybe there really was something in your wine."

"Poison?"

"No. Something else."

"I have to go home," I said weakly. "I don't belong here, and I need to go home."

"Okay," Brendan said. "I'll take you home."

I hadn't known I was crying until he brushed the tears away. His eyes were glazed, but he looked sad, pitying even.

"I'm scared."

"I know." He held on to me.

"Am I affecting everyone?"

"Yes, but it's not your fault."

"Then why are you acting normal?"

"Trust me, I don't feel normal. Besides," he said with a laugh, "I've had a lot of practice. Come on. Let's get you home."

We walked and walked and walked, and all the while, whispers and apparitions spun around me.

I held on tight to Brendan's hand. "Please be real," I whispered.

"I'm real. I'm here. It's almost over. Just a little while more."

We stepped over broken chess pieces, and I found it easier to breathe.

Slowly, the shadows and the voices faded, and he didn't need to help me walk anymore.

"Brendan," I said in a small voice. "I'm so sorry."

"Everything's okay," he said soothingly. "Your mind is getting clearer. It's easier to be around you now."

"I thought... I was back in the past."

"I felt it, too. It was a cruel trick. It wasn't Drake's fault. He was wrapped up in the magic, too."

"You always protect him." I looked up. "And me."

"Don't worry about that now."

I held on to him and focused on taking one step at a time, shielding my mind against everything else. Then we were before a door I recognised.

"Home," Brendan said. "Go on in."

"You aren't coming?"

"You don't need me anymore. Scarlet's waiting for you. Everyone is waiting for you. You won't hurt them now. Go in and get some sleep, and everything will be fine in the morning."

I slipped my arms around his neck and gazed at him.

"Go." His voice sounded hoarse.

I let go and faced the door, hesitating, but his hand on my back pushed me forward. I remembered a lot of things all of a sudden.

I looked back at him, my hand on the doorknob. "If you get married, I'll still be your friend even if you can't be mine."

I slipped inside my bedroom and closed the door on him. My room was full. Grim, Realtín, Anya, and Líle were all asleep in there. I crept into bed beside my daughter and soon fell asleep, but a horrible feeling in my chest warned me that the trouble was only starting.

# Chapter 12

Scarlet pinched my nose and woke me. I sat up with a gasp, trying to figure out where my nightmare began and ended.

The sharp pain in my temple sent me back down, groaning. "Ow. Ow. _Ow_."

Scarlet launched herself onto my belly. Moaning, I sat up and gave her the attention she so desperately wanted. And that was when I noticed some of my friends gathered around the end of the bed, looking at me as if waiting for something.

"What?" I asked.

Anya and Líle exchanged relieved glances.

"How are you feeling?" Bekind asked, Realtín sitting on her shoulder.

I gingerly touched my temples. "I have a raging headache. What the hell happened last night?"

"We thought you might know," Anya said. "Things got a little wild, and we think it might have been because of you."

"Either that or your Darksiders really know how to throw a party," Líle said. "I mean, _wow_."

Realtín burst out laughing. "Everyone thinks Cara's the one who had a good time."

I honestly couldn't remember. There were blurs and flashes but no concrete memories.

"My mouth is dry, and I need a bath. Then we can talk." I got up and almost fell over. "Shit. What did I do to my ankle?"

"We have no idea." Líle bit her lip as though trying not to laugh.

"Nobody saw you for most of the night," Bekind said. "And then suddenly we were all ordered to stay away from you. We certainly felt your presence, and both kings mysteriously went missing, too. There will be rumours about this."

"Biiiiig rumours," Realtín said, and a giggle finally escaped Líle's lips.

"Did I ruin everything?" What the hell was wrong with me? I knew the entire night had been as important as the ceremony.

"You didn't ruin anything," Anya said carefully. "But you were very... influential."

"She should know." Realtín hovered over Anya's head. "I saw her and Arlen sneaking out to the stables together like human teenagers."

Anya tried in vain to grab Realtín out of the air.

I groaned. "I don't even want to know what happened. Has Scarlet eaten yet?"

"It's noon," Realtín scoffed from on top of a wall lamp. "She's about to have some lunch."

"I missed her breakfast? Why didn't you wake me?"

"I _tried_. You threatened to behead me with a bread knife."

Líle broke down completely, her eyes streaming with tears as guffaws wracked her body.

Ignoring her, I tried to run my hands through my hair, but it was still full of pins. "I should have a bath before someone sees me like this. Do I look like shit?"

Realtín opened her mouth to answer.

I held up my hand. "Never mind." I kissed Scarlet and left to have a bath.

Orlaith was standing outside the door and accompanied me. Usually, she chatted because she was a morning person, but as we walked, she kept her mouth shut and avoided my eyes.

"Oh, stop thinking about it," I snapped. "Nothing happened." _Stupid, gossipy fae._

She stuttered a response, but I went into the room and slammed the door in her face. _Stupid, reckless human, more like._

I bathed alone and tried to figure out what the hell was going on. I didn't feel hungover. I _did_ have a kicker of a headache. Why would I have let myself get so drunk? I squeezed my eyes shut and forced myself to concentrate. I remembered Anya taking care of Scarlet in my room. I remembered going back to the party. And I remembered a lavender-haired woman who planned on marrying Brendan. Snatches of other memories came back, but I wasn't sure what parts were dreams and what were reality.

A polite knock on the door drew my attention. A faery, accompanied by Orlaith, offered clean clothes and help with my hair. I sent both of them packing to give me more time to think, but it was no use. There were empty spaces in my memories.

I headed back to my room, wondering where the hell Rumble was hiding. I heard footsteps behind me and turned to look. Drake approached, his fingers twitching with anxiety. I gazed at him, wondering why he looked so solemn.

"Wait a second," I blurted. "Did I see your wings last night?"

He nodded, his cheeks awash with colour. "Brendan wants us to meet right now. May I walk you down?"

I hesitated. Why was he being so awkward? "Okay."

"I've just been to your room looking for you," he said, avoiding my eyes. "The others are watching over Scarlet for you—don't worry."

We walked down the hallway, staying a couple of inches apart. "Cara, wait."

I stopped in surprise. He was the old Drake all of a sudden, the old, earnest, _good_ Drake. "What's wrong?" I asked.

"I'm so sorry about last night. I don't know what you remember, but..."

The words fell away as it hit me. We had kissed, and I had told him I didn't love him. And he had been... unpleasant. My hand flew to my mouth as more memories returned. I had basically brought the entire castle on a bad trip. "What the hell _happened_ last night?"

"Perhaps it was the ceremony. Perhaps there's more of the fae in you than we thought."

"What do you mean?"

"We felt... something, and you were gone, so we went looking for you. When Brendan found you, you were... overly emotional and projecting it strongly."

"I've gotten that much from Realtín," I said wryly.

He cleared his throat. "We separated you from everyone else in an attempt to stop... incidents, but I... was affected. I'm so sorry. I wasn't expecting it. I've done my best not to feel anything for a long time, and your emotion was... too much. It manifested badly within me, and I have to apologise to you for the way I behaved. If Brendan hadn't been there... you have to understand. That's not _me_. I would never... I never intended to—"

"Oh, God, please stop talking about it. I feel bad enough as it is." The back of my neck prickled. "I'm sorry I made everyone... uncomfortable."

A flash of mischief brightened his eyes. "As far as I'm aware, nobody has complained."

"Except you."

"Nothing ever follows the plan, does it?" His expression changed instantly. "I have to admit I held on to the hope that you would understand me, Cara. I thought we knew each other; I thought you would forgive me for the things I did or at least understand it was all part of a larger plan. I didn't expect it to come to this. If I had known how everything would turn out, I might have..." He shook his head, a pained look in his eyes.

"We never really knew each other though, did we?" I said gently. "It was a flash of attraction in the heat of the moment." I saw everything with older—maybe even wiser—eyes.

"It was more than just a flash," he whispered.

"But we had barely met when Brendan's soul was pushed into your body. It was already confusing, and between the three of us, we made it so much more complicated. I was pulled from one of you to the other without really knowing either of you. I just mean... we didn't get the chance to learn how to understand each other. If we'd had more time, or..." I bit my lip. "Well, other things have always gotten in the way, haven't they? And if you ever understood me, you would have known that some actions go too far."

"Like marriage?" he asked bitterly.

"For one. I know you never promised me anything, but I couldn't help viewing your marriage to Sorcha as a betrayal."

"And Brendan was always there to butter you up," he said bitterly.

"Don't do that," I said. "It's small and nasty and doesn't suit you. Brendan's never hurt me."

"That's because he's the great king Brendan, making the rest of us look bad." He tried to pull off a joke, but it just sounded pathetic to me.

I made a sound of frustration. "There you go again! It's time to take responsibility for your own actions, Drake. You chose to send me away, you chose to marry Sorcha, and you're choosing to act like a stranger to Scarlet. _You_ hurt me. It has _nothing_ to do with Brendan, but if we're bringing him into it, he has always cared about you and done what he could to protect you."

"No, he's always come between us."

"Unless I bloody well married him behind your back, then it doesn't compare. How would you have felt if you gave me your heart and then, without any warning, discovered I had married someone who hated you?"

"I was trying to protect you. I swear it."

"But you sent me away from my friends, and I felt like I was being punished for something I didn't know I had done. Seeing you with Sorcha was you sticking the knife in, and the way you acted around Scarlet just twisted that blade. A part of me will always remember how you made me feel. The bad times started to outweigh the good a long time ago."

"I don't know how to be around her." He looked agitated. "She's a beautiful child, and my favour could harm her. You would never forgive me then, would you?"

I stared at him, unwavering. The brittle part of me couldn't soften for him. Not anymore.

"I don't know how to be a father. Not to her."

"But you'll be one for your real family." It was my turn to sound bitter and resentful. "With Sorcha."

"You don't know what I've sacrificed for you and Scarlet. You don't know the things I've done to protect you." He reached for me then dropped his arm. "I didn't lie when I told you I would always love you, but it's dangerous for me to show affection to anyone."

Tears rose in my eyes. "You have a wife who actually loves you despite it all. She knows everything, and she's still capable of loving you. That's not me. I can't be that person. I can't forgive or forget. I grew up with a father who made me feel like nothing I ever did was good enough. I'm old enough to stop letting people make me feel that way."

"If I hadn't married her," he whispered, "what would have happened between us?"

Brendan's smile flashed before my eyes, and I felt a sharp pain in my chest. "I honestly don't know. Nothing ever happens the way I think it will."

"This is life," he said sardonically.

"Brendan will be waiting for us. This is it now. We have work to do, right?"

"Right." He looked at me searchingly. "Maybe when this is all over, we can be friends again."

"Of course." But I didn't really mean it. I followed him down to the study.

Brendan was poring over an ancient-looking book. When he heard us enter, he looked at one of us then the other. "Everything all right now?"

I smiled. "Looks like."

"Good," he said briskly, "because we have a lot to talk about. The realm is dying, and the only hope we have is to work together." His lips twitched as he caught my eye. "Well, I did promise."

"Shouldn't we talk about what happened?" I asked.

"Last night?" Brendan glanced at Drake. "I don't think—"

"No, I mean about... the day I killed Sadler."

Both men let out a hiss.

"I just don't think it's a good idea to let the bad feeling fester," I continued. "And if—"

"I don't want to talk about it," Drake said.

"Of course you don't," Brendan muttered under his breath.

"At least I had a plan," Drake snapped. "You wasted how long trying to convince us that we could make peace with Sadler?"

Oh, God. Why had I opened my mouth?

"Yes, I remember your plan," Brendan said nastily. "The one where you steal even more of my realm from me."

Drake said, "Some of us take what we earn; some of us try to live on the good old days. How's that working for you, Brendan?" The two men squared off.

I got between them before they could come to blows. "Enough, the pair of you." I laid a hand on each of their chests. "This isn't what I meant. Brendan, _I'm_ the one who stole the Darkside, not Drake, so take it out on me." I glared at Drake. "And if you don't realise that you have what you have because Brendan is _letting_ you keep it, then I pity your stupidity."

They bristled, but I wasn't done yet. "This blight is bigger than us—bigger than anything we've ever imagined. It's destroying everything. The Great Forest is the heart of the realm, and it's dying. The taint is even in the human realm. We're running out of time, and the longer we spend bitching, the quicker this disease wins. What happened with Sadler was a mistake. It shouldn't have happened, but it did, and we can deal with it properly after we save the people depending on us." I met Brendan's gaze. "Are you with me?"

He nodded, but the expression in his eyes made the hair stand up on the back of my neck.

I turned my back on him and faced Drake. "Are you with us?"

He looked from me to Brendan and back again. "Yes," he said hoarsely. "I'm with you both."

I traced my hand across the map in wonder. "This is everything? This is the entire realm?" It was much larger than I had ever expected.

"This is our world." Brendan moved my hand aside. "This area was the first to succumb to the Darkside's spread."

I studied the markers on the map. "So, it's not actually spreading. It's jumping around almost. Scattering. How does that make sense?"

"It doesn't," Drake said. "And people are terrified."

"Can't say I'm feeling too brave either." I tapped the section of the map that marked the Darkside. "There's a sinkhole in this direction, I think. Líle and Grim have both seen it. If _that_ happens under this castle, then we're all screwed. And another could occur anywhere. I mean, we had no warning."

"That would be a disaster," Drake said. "We've already lost plenty of fertile land to this darkness in my territory."

The randomness was what I couldn't figure out. There were gaps between the marked areas. "It's like a disease, but the spread isn't natural. Maybe it was before, but I've heard about the way Sadler worked. When he needed to get someone out of the way, their land miraculously succumbed to the blight almost overnight."

"But Sadler's dead," Brendan said.

"His god isn't." I sighed. "And I ruined that god's deal with Sadler. Maybe this is his vengeance."

"It's a possibility," Brendan said. "But the fact is we played with nature when I escaped from the Fade. It's likely we stretched the rift and caused more problems."

"But if a god is interfering, we need to find out how to stop him. In the meantime, we must find a way to seal the rift and then find a way to remove the blight," I said slowly. "And there might be a tree that could cleanse the land."

"A tree that might no longer exist," Drake reminded me.

"The Guardian of the Forest should know," I said. "We have to do _something_. And the Watcher could help us with the rift. He knew more than we thought he did, I think."

"Agreed," Drake said. "So, which problem is more urgent?"

"We can't waste time," I said. "We could split up and deal with both matters separately, but one could lead us to the other."

"What do you mean?" Brendan asked.

"Maybe this is _exactly_ what happened before. Why else would a tree be capable of cleaning up this mess? Whatever the Watcher tells us could lead us back to the Guardian and vice versa."

"The Watcher is closest," Brendan said. "At the very least, we could send a party to search for the tree. Best-case scenario is that the tree is already cleansing the earth by the time we fix the rift, and that we're wrong about a god's interference. If we're lucky, the blight was caused by the rift rather than a god."

He and I exchanged a knowing glance. We had never been _that_ lucky.

"Can any of us afford to leave our lands while we go on what could be a wild goose chase?" Drake asked.

I looked at him. "Do we have any choice? We won't have any land left if we let this go on for much longer." And I needed a solution before someone figured out exactly what Scarlet was capable of and decided to sacrifice her to some god in an attempt to clean the land. "I'm going. With or without you both."

"She's right," Brendan said. "And perhaps Cara is safer away from the courts."

"Why?" I demanded. "My court isn't dangerous."

"Somebody tried to harm you last night. Drake and I are agreed on that. Perhaps 'harm' is a strong word, but you were certainly sabotaged. You weren't in control of yourself, and the instability of your emotions affected all of us."

"I just drank too much wine."

He looked as though he might explode. "Anyone could have hurt you last night. Would you even remember now? Emotional instability is dangerous for anyone, but more so for someone in your position. And as we don't know where the perpetrator came from, you might be safer on a journey through the realm."

"And while we're gone?" Drake asked. "Who will control in our stead? Who will make sure our people are fed?"

Brendan nodded at me. "How are yours surviving?"

"We've been using the human realm," I admitted. "We've bought some farmland and sent farmers to take care of it."

"Bought it with what?" Drake asked.

"Anything that has value in the human realm. We've used gold and gems and managed to exchange them"—I shrugged—"with the help of a little magic. In a year, we might have some results. We've brought soil across, too, in case we can do something with it here. We haven't found a way to make it work yet, but we're not giving up."

"What about short-term options?" Brendan asked.

"We're buying food, too. It's been tougher than you'd expect actually. But if you need to trade, our doors are open."

"I'm impressed," Brendan said.

I tried not to look as pleased as I felt. "I have enough advisers running around this court that they won't even miss me here. My problem is Scarlet."

"Take her with you," Brendan said immediately. "If we succeed, she'll always be remembered for taking part."

"And if I put her in danger?"

"Then we send her back to the human realm for a time." He looked at Drake. "What do you think?"

"I think the Darksiders won't be pleased to lose their heir, but they may understand how necessary it is to keep mother with daughter. I think the child should travel with us." He gave me an odd look. "It may be more distracting to constantly wonder if she's safe at home."

"I'm not sure I want her so close to the Fade. Or here, if there could be blight-related disasters. At least, if anything happens to me, there's still Scarlet as long as she's safe. Can I name someone as her guardian in case of my death?"

Drake and Brendan exchanged a glance.

"It's an option," Brendan said.

"Then I choose Bekind and Grim," I said, and they both looked surprised.

"You'll need to make some kind of official document," Drake said abruptly. "If we're done with the preliminary discussion, I'll go fetch the others. Who do you want here?"

Brendan and I gave him some names, and then he was gone.

"Bekind's an immortal relative, so I understand that, but why Grim?" Brendan asked when we were alone.

"Because I trust him."

"Can I ask you a question?"

I swallowed hard. "Yes."

"Do you feel safe around me?"

I frowned. "Of course I do."

"You trust me with your life but not your heart."

And that heart stammered in my chest. "What do you mean?"

He stretched out in the chair. "Scarlet. You don't trust me with her."

_Oh._ "Maybe I chose Grim because if I'm dead on this trip, it probably means you are, too."

"Clever answer," he said with a grin.

"Me, clever? I'm just a human. Listen, I'm sorry about last night. How I behaved and... you having to take care of me... again."

"It wasn't your fault. It was a devious twist of magic that affected you badly. No need for apologies."

I moved into the seat next to him and faced him. "I'm still not sure what was real."

He patted my hand. "Then don't think about it. Nobody else batted an eyelid."

"You had to keep everyone away from me."

"Just in case. It was merely a precaution."

I looked away, mortified. "Realtín reckons there are rumours about what happened. Why all the royals vanished and stuff."

His laugh was warm and reassuring. "Oh, Cara. There have always been rumours about us three. I don't worry about it, so why should you? The fae will be speaking about this celebration for years because they had a great time. The gossip is just an added bonus."

"You didn't have a great time. You had to babysit the idiot again."

He laughed. "I had an interesting evening. I always think I know what you're capable of, and then you go and surprise me again."

"Speaking of last night, have you seen my bodyguard anywhere? I didn't get him killed or anything, right?"

"The one you call Rumble." He grinned. "According to you, he's a strong candidate for your future marriage."

I covered my face with my hands. "Oh, God. What have I done?"

"Don't worry. You didn't embarrass him to his face. He was concerned, so he stayed away from you. Which is good because he might have taken Drake's head if he had been present. Nobody's as tolerant as me anymore."

"Stop _joking_ about last night."

He wrapped his arm around me and squeezed, a delighted look on his face. "You look so uncomfortable. It's highly amusing."

I moved out of his reach. "And you look entirely too comfortable with the situation. Anyway, Rumble's not like everyone else. When Sadler almost killed my baby, Rumble was able to hold me when nobody else could stand up straight. He was fine."

Brendan leaned toward me, finally getting serious. "This was different, which is why I'm concerned. And I am concerned, Cara. If someone in this court is trying to destroy you, you have to find out who before it's too late."

"I don't think it's someone from this court."

He frowned. "Why do I sense that I'm about to hear information I won't like?"

"Because I'm about to tell you information you won't like?" I grinned at his pissed-off expression. "It's not that big of a deal. There was an attempt on my life outside the castle. We dealt with it, but nobody present was familiar with any of the attackers. They were warriors, though."

His jaw clenched. "Was anyone hurt?"

"I lost a scout. We got all of the attackers."

"We?"

I kept my expression blank.

"This isn't good." He ran his hands across his face. "At least this Rumble person seems to be a decent soldier—a decent man, even. I believe he would never harm you, nor even give himself a chance to do it unwillingly."

I felt sad. "I haven't seen him all day."

"He's watching at a distance," he said matter-of-factly. "Just in case."

"Are you kidding me?"

"No. He's lingering somewhere outside as we speak." He grinned. "Your face has gotten quite red. It's annoying being disobeyed, isn't it?"

I made a face at him then skipped out of the room and shouted Rumble's name as loudly as I could. He came around the corner, looking sheepish even with the helmet on.

I met him halfway and hugged him. "I'm sorry I scared you, but you don't have to avoid me."

He cleared his throat, clearly uncomfortable. I let him go and tutted.

"There are lines that can't be crossed. Last night threatened to overcome me."

"It won't happen again," I said.

"Next time I'll be more vigilant."

"It was an accident. With everything that was going on, something messed up the air. That's all. Maybe it was the music or the dancing." I smiled. "Or a bad glass of wine."

"That's the problem. There were so many opportunities for people to interfere. We forget how vulnerable you are because you're strong. Next time, I'll be more aware. But I do remember it was Bart who handed you that glass of wine."

Fear curled in my gut. "He wouldn't hurt me. He helped me."

"I don't trust him."

"I'll confront him about the wine. Come on then. We're still having a meeting."

"I'll wait outside."

I knew he didn't want to get close to me, so I let it go. "I'll talk to you soon."

I rejoined Brendan.

"You found him?" he said, looking up from the book he was reading.

I flopped into the chair next to him. "He's totally scared of me now."

"It's understandable. You were particularly... influential last night." He smiled. "How is your ankle?"

"Sore. What did I do to it?"

"Fell over." He raised his brows. "Did you really forget so much?"

"It's a blur." I peeked at him shyly. "Most of it is a blur. I remember you helping me, and I should probably apologise for being, um, pushy."

He threw back his head and laughed. "She calls it pushy. Ah, Cara, I had forgotten how much I—"

The door opened, and he stopped abruptly as the others filed in. Vix handed Scarlet to me, looking distasteful. "She doesn't like me. She keeps crying."

I looked at Scarlet in surprise. She snuggled against my chest, avoiding looking at anyone else in the room. That wasn't like her.

"It's just her age," I said at last. "She's making strange with people. That's normal."

The room was soon full of people trying really hard not to look me in the eye or make any reference to the night before.

"All right, enough," I said at last. "Yes, last night some kind of magic screwed up my brain and everything else, and yes, the rest of you bore the brunt of it. Can we please get past that now and move on to what's important?"

Brendan rose to his feet. "We're going to need to leave soon, and arrangements will have to be made."

He and Drake quickly explained what we had agreed on.

"Why not send a delegation?" Fiadh asked. "Why do you all need to travel together?"

"The realm needs to act as one," I said. "And we don't know what we'll be facing. This could take a few weeks or even months. But if we don't act, we'll be ruined. We've had enough bad luck. It's time to deal with the Darkside problem. It's time to heal the rift and cleanse the land."

And when I said those words, far too many people in the room looked to my daughter.

# Chapter 13

My advisers were _not_ happy with me. We sat around the meeting table, going over the same points again and again.

I rubbed my temples. "I'm going to the Great Forest, not another planet. I won't be long." The sullen expressions didn't change. "For the love of—would you rather I let you die?"

"And what happens to us if _you_ die?" Rafe asked.

"Then Grim and Bekind will become Scarlet's guardians and help you all take care of the Darkside until Scarlet is old enough."

"The _brownie_?" Vix sounded horrified.

"Yes. I'm the human. He's the brownie. Have we all caught up?"

"What if it's a trap of some kind?" Fiadh asked. "A way for the other kings to come and take Scarlet or the throne while you're not around to stop them."

"That's the last thing on anyone's minds right now," I said. "The land is dying. Rapidly. We have a chance to stop it. Coveting each other's crowns won't mean much when there's no realm."

Rumble agreed. "The blight affects the Silver and Green courts, too. It's not just our problem anymore. The rulers must be seen to take charge and do something to stop the spread."

"Finally, somebody gets it," I said.

"Perhaps we should be appeasing the gods," Thistle said.

"What, with sacrifices or deals that raise the dead?" I shook my head. "We can't afford the price tag. This is our best option. I can outrun anything on Dubh, and do you really doubt Rumble's abilities?"

"No, but—"

I held up my hand to stop Vix. "This has to be done. We have to find a way to stop the spread of the blight."

"But why should you be the one to go?" Fiadh asked. "It's dangerous out there."

"Because I might have caused it. And I'm the only one who's seen the Guardian of the Forest. I have to go. Besides, it's not so dangerous anymore."

"There are still enemies out there," Fiadh said. "Nature is against us, for one. You could fall into a sinkhole yourself. And there will always be people who want you dead. Sadler's death didn't stop that. You know this. You barely escaped an attack already."

"I wasn't in that much danger," I said lightly.

"But there are obviously those who want what you have, and what the kings have, too. There are those creatures who are so twisted and demented that they don't even know what they fight for. And there is old magic that doesn't obey what a ruler might say. Don't fool yourself into thinking that it's safe out there."

I tried not to shiver. "There'll be six of us. That's not enough to draw attention to ourselves, but it's enough to defend ourselves if we do get into trouble. I'm not as helpless as everyone likes to imagine, you know." I hesitated. "But I'm worried that something will happen while I'm gone—something that will damage the integrity of the castle. In light of that, I propose we send Scarlet and the other children to the human realm for a while."

"Nobody's going to agree to that," Vix scoffed.

"I will," Fiadh said. "If something should befall the adults, at least the children will be saved."

"But the human realm?" Thistle said doubtfully.

"We can do what Brendan did," I said. "Take over an empty house and cover it with protective magic. We can do that, right?"

"A glamour?" Fiadh nodded. "That would do."

"All right, then. Most of the children will be taken to homes in the human realm. Half of the court is in and out of the human realm as it is. It won't be hard to have everyone else ready to move if disaster strikes." I looked at Fiadh. "I'm sending Scarlet back to my grandparents. It's easy to secure the way there if someone goes after her. Dymphna's already agreed to send Eithne. There's not much room, but Setanta can go with them, too, if you want."

"I'm happy with that plan," Fiadh said.

"Vix, Orlaith, Líle, and Bekind will be with them."

"Me?" Vix complained. "I should be coming with you."

"I need you with Scarlet." I gave her a meaningful look.

"Conn can accompany them," Fiadh said.

I shook my head. "You'll need him. Be prepared to evacuate if anything does go wrong. I need you all to take care of things while I'm gone. And if something happens to me, look to Bekind. She'll know what to do next. But I'm coming back. As soon as we figure out the next step to make, I'll be here. In the meantime, just lock down everything and try to keep things going." I tried to smile. "And be prepared to celebrate when I get back."

All I got were doubtful looks. After another fruitless discussion, I dismissed everyone. Bart remained in his chair.

"You weren't very talkative," I said, sitting across from him.

"I wouldn't want to be seen as too influential. That's what earns you enemies around here."

"Is it?" I sighed. Being queen was so complicated.

"I believe you wanted to speak to me."

"Oh?"

"Every time your gaze falls on me, you get this look in your eyes. As though you're wondering about something." He stretched his arms out. "So. Here I am."

He wasn't wrong. "What's your take on what happened on the night of the ceremony?"

The corner of his mouth curled upward. "My take? I believe somebody tried to make a fool of you. Or perhaps they wanted to see what you're made of. Either way, I don't believe they succeeded."

I stared at him in surprise.

Bart threw back his head and laughed. "You don't really think that's all you're capable of, do you? Not now that you have the power of a court behind you."

"Did you want to know what I'm capable of, Bart?"

He sobered and leaned forward, his palms lying on the table. The backs of his hands were covered in fresh scratches. "I'm _desperate_ to know what you're capable of. But that isn't the way I would find out." He reached across the table, inches away from touching my hand. "And you've been kind to me. I don't think I'd like to make a fool of you either."

"You gave me a glass of wine, and now people think that you put something in it."

"They are beyond foolish when it comes to the things they don't understand." He leaned back in his chair. "They think of me when anything goes wrong. It wasn't me. I didn't interfere with your glass."

"Then who did?"

"Who says it was your wine?" He lifted his shoulders in shrug. "The fae are imaginative, my dear queen. But if you're looking to blame anyone, look elsewhere."

On a whim, I asked, "Why were you arguing with the glaistig?"

A flicker of surprise crossed his face but was gone just as quickly. "She planned on leaving that night. I told her it was a bad time."

"She's gone? Could she have done it?"

"She is gone, and she could have done it, but perhaps she just didn't like the company."

"I didn't realise you two were friendly."

"Friendly?" He sighed. "No, not friendly. But sometimes it's better to deal with the devil you know."

"As opposed to?"

"The devil you only know by reputation." He smiled. "I will personally look into this on your behalf if only to clear my own name."

"I'm not going to blame you without proof."

"I know." He cocked his head to the side. "I can't tell if that's noble or just plain foolish."

Scarlet was crying, and the entire court was in an uproar.

"I can't leave yet," I snapped at Drake when he asked for the umpteenth time. "Scarlet's sick."

"Children often get sick," Drake said. "We still need to leave as soon as possible. We agreed."

"Well, I can't! So you're going to have to wait."

He looked at me as though I were the most unreasonable person in the world, but I had never heard such a cry from Scarlet's mouth before. I hushed her as I held her close to me, terrified that she was somehow succumbing to the faery madness that humans were often vulnerable to.

Her cries grew high-pitched, and everyone in the room flinched. "I'm taking her upstairs," I said crossly. "Somebody watch out for the Miacha woman."

Tears rolled down Anya's face as she followed me upstairs. "I've never seen her like this before."

"Me either. She's... she'll be okay."

But Scarlet's anguished cries filled the castle, and the staff we passed as we swept up the stairs looked anguished themselves. Was she spreading her emotions outward, too? Was that why people were usually so much happier around her?

In my room, I paced up and down with Scarlet as fae kept coming to the door with ridiculous suggestions, such as putting a moss-covered stone under her pillow or making her drink the blood of various animals killed under a full moon.

"Everyone out!" I shouted at last, unable to take it anymore. "All of you. Leave us alone!"

And Scarlet kept crying. I couldn't console her. Her cheeks were flushed, and black locks of hair stuck to them. She was agitated and unsettled, and I couldn't soothe her. I felt like the worst mother in the world and utterly helpless.

"I would take it from you if I could," I told her. "I'd take it so you didn't have to feel this way."

She howled in my ear as I shushed her. She was exhausted. Her eyes were red-rimmed and sleepy, but whatever she was feeling kept her awake.

Sweat rolled down my back. Babies cried. Small children cried. It was usually nothing. But how would I know what was normal?

Servants kept bringing me things intended to soothe Scarlet, but none of them worked. And by the expressions on their faces, my anxiety was getting out of control. I tried to lock it down, to be cool and logical and emotionless, but that was my daughter crying in my arms. I couldn't do anything but panic and _feel_.

I heard a horse outside and moved to the window. The cool breeze dried the sweat on my brow. Brendan had just returned on Dubh. He must have been hunting. I wanted to scream at him for hunting while Scarlet was crying nonstop. There wasn't a rational bone left in my body.

I had to leave the faery realm. I had to take Scarlet to the human realm and get her to a real hospital. The blight would have to wait, and if Scarlet used magic in front of a human, I would figure out a solution later. I had waited too long.

I hurried to the door, desperate to find somebody to help me prepare to leave, but Brendan was standing there instead, his hand in the air, poised to knock.

"I'm sorry!" I cried. "I have to take her to a hospital. I have to bring her to a real doctor because I don't know how to fix her, and I don't trust anyone else to help."

He looked taken aback for an instant before ushering me back inside the room. "Calm down. Children get sick. It doesn't mean they need the hospital."

"You don't understand. She never gets sick! She never, ever, _ever_ gets sick. Or cries. She just doesn't cry like this. And I've checked her for everything I can think of. She has no spots, no rash, no broken bones, no freakishly high temperature, nothing. She's just... crying, and I'm freaking out. I'm not prepared. She's not supposed to get sick. I got her vaccinated to stop that!"

He made an expression that I took for disgust.

"Don't judge me," I snapped, bouncing Scarlet in my arms. She was exhausted, half-asleep, but still distressed. "It stops kids from catching dangerous diseases."

"It doesn't prevent faery fever. And I'm not judging anyone anyway. Why do you always assume—"

"Shut _up_." I stopped moving. "What the freaking hell is faery fever?"

He held up his hands, his face creasing with regret. "It's not... it's probably not real."

"You said it. You wouldn't have said it if... just tell me!"

"There are old stories that say changelings and half-breeds would catch the faerie fever. And if they survived, they were strong and worth having. They became known as fae if they passed that hurdle."

"Why the _fuck_ has nobody told me about this before?"

"Because it's a story. It hasn't happened in years. It may not even be real."

"Oh, my God," I whispered. "I did this. I protected her from human diseases, and then I brought her here and exposed her to faery germs!"

"Okay, you need to relax."

"I need to take her to a hospital."

"All right," he said. "But not until you calm down. What if your anxiety is making her feel worse? You have everyone in the castle wound up, and you'll do the same to the human doctors. And if they're wound up, they're not going to take good care of Scarlet, now, are they?"

I shook my head slowly, trying to see the sense in his words.

He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly. "You go and take a bath while I order the servants to prepare for the journey. I'll watch Scarlet, and if she isn't better by the time you're done, then I'll go with you."

"You will?"

"She's still my heir," he said in an odd sort of tone. He took Scarlet out of my hands. She was so tired that she barely noticed. But I was sticky with sweat and tears.

"Okay. I'll get cleaned up, and then we'll go."

"And calm down."

"Right. I'll calm down. I'm... I'm sorry."

"I'll have someone prepare everything," he said soothingly. "Just trust me."

I reached out to touch Scarlet then dropped my hand in case Brendan was right, and I was accidentally hurting my own daughter.

The bath helped. Being away from Scarlet's crying had... wait. I couldn't hear her crying. Inwardly freaking out, I quickly dried and dressed.

I hurried back to my room, but I couldn't hear Scarlet's cries any longer. I burst into the room, panicking, but I stopped short when I saw the scene before me.

My hand flew to my mouth to cover my smile. A giant faery king was asleep on top of my bed, a pink-cheeked toddler nestled against his chest. She snuffled in her sleep. I closed the door gently behind me and approached them. On the bedside locker, a sticky spoon lay next to a popular, human over-the-counter medicine for small children with temperature and pain. Scarlet had never needed it before, and it hadn't even occurred to me that something like that would help with such cries.

I pressed my hand against Scarlet's forehead. She was already cooler than before. Her ears were red tinged, and some discharge had come out of one ear canal. I sighed with relief. An ear infection. And now it was over, or at least, she was done crying. The worst part was I knew about such infections, but when they didn't happen to Scarlet, I forgot that they existed. And faced with a crying child who had never been sick, all logic had flown out the window. What an idiot I was.

Scarlet's lips moved in her sleep, and her tiny hands clutched Brendan's shirt. He smelled like grass and fresh air. I yawned, absolutely exhausted. I climbed onto the bed on the other side of Brendan and curled into his side. I fell asleep almost instantly.

Dawn was breaking when I awoke next to Scarlet. She giggled as she tugged on my hair to wake me. Brendan was nowhere to be seen. Gazing at my child, who showed no sign of the previous day's illness, I couldn't help giving a smile of relief.

I waited another day to make sure, but once I was convinced that Scarlet was okay, I took her, Eithne, and Setanta to my grandparents' house. Many of the children of the court had already been relocated, so that was a relief. Word had been sent ahead, so my family and Zoe knew to expect me.

As soon as I saw Zoe, I pulled her into a hug. "I've missed you so much."

"I missed you, too. Hey, my little lovebug. How you've grown." She held Scarlet lovingly. "I heard you were sick, but you look all back to normal now."

"Yeah, she seems fine," I said. "I kind of panicked. Turns out it was just an ear infection."

"Poor thing." She looked at me. "I hear we have a full house. I'd love to stick around, but I'm back in college. I can chip in on the weekends, though, so don't worry."

"I'm not expecting you to."

She caught sight of the hounds. "What the hell are they?"

"Scarlet's bodyguards in training," I teased. "They were a gift, and they're too young to come with me, so I need them here to make sure they get fed. I don't want them going hunting and forgetting to come back."

"They look like freaking monster wolves in training. If I get bitten, you're a dead woman."

"They won't bite," I said impatiently. "I don't have much time. We're still organising exactly who gets to be in charge while I'm gone. Bekind will keep you updated, I'm sure."

"No Anya?"

I shook my head. "She can't keep giving up her life for us. Besides, she has a wedding to plan."

Zoe smiled. "Really?"

"Hopefully."

We spent the morning getting everyone settled in. "I have to check on the other children before I get back," I said regretfully. "I'll be home soon enough, honey." I kissed Scarlet then said my goodbyes. But I bade Bekind and Vix to walk me out for a private chat. Once we were alone, I asked, "How are we getting on with the recruitments?"

"Very well," Bekind said.

"Just remember," I said, "we need women who can be subtle, charming, and yet still capable of ripping out a man's throat if needs be."

"And can you be all that?" Vix asked.

I stared right back at her. "I'm capable of a lot of things, Vix."

"Are you certain this is what you want?" Bekind asked.

"It's necessary. I'm doing things so Scarlet doesn't have to. And you're immortal. You can take charge of this for as long as she needs, right?"

Bekind hesitated before nodding. "I will always stand by the two of you. You know that, Cara. But actions like this will change you."

"I have to change. If we're to survive, then I need to be the one to change. Have you found anyone with the knowledge to drug me?"

Vix shook her head. "Not the drug we're looking for."

"It's still not certain you were drugged," Bekind said softly. "It may have been a side effect of the ceremony."

"Or a desperate Darksider looking for another hit of your personal drug," Vix added.

"Or someone wondering how far they can push me. Just keep looking. For spies, for assassins... and most of all, for traitors."

# Chapter 14

Six of us left on horseback the following morning. I took Dubh and Rumble, Brendan brought Bran, and Dymphna volunteered to accompany Drake. Darksiders lined the road through the forest to salute us as we passed. I briefly wondered which one of them would be likeliest to stab me in the back.

Dubh was eager to run, so we indulged in some galloping away from the others until I remembered that Rumble's job was to keep up with me. When I rode back to the others, my cheeks felt hot, my heart raced, and my mind was clear of any cobwebs.

"You look happy," Dymphna said with a smile.

"I haven't done this in a while, not since somebody tried to shoot me with an arrow. Again. I've been cooped up for too long. Poor Dubh. He's missed this, too."

"And all it took was a blight," Brendan teased.

"I sometimes wonder if Sadler planned this to happen after his death," Drake said.

Brendan snorted. "It's more like something a scorned god would do."

"If that's right," I said slowly, thinking of Thistle's suggestion, "can't we just appeal to a stronger god for help?"

"Who would want to provoke a god like that?" Bran asked.

"Oh, brony," I teased. "Are you scared?"

"I'm too smart to be anything but scared," he said.

I laughed. The kid was sweet, and I was glad he was on the journey with us because everyone else was acting as though their mothers had just died.

We had decided to visit the Watcher first in case he had information on where to find the Guardian. Everyone was agreed that my meeting with the Guardian had been a lucky coincidence, and I wasn't entirely sure I could find him or the Watcher again. The kings were both fairly certain they could find the Watcher's underground tunnel, and Dubh was another sure bet, so I wasn't worried.

"Can we see the sinkhole?" Brendan asked.

"It wouldn't take long to detour," I said. "It's close to the castle. But I wouldn't want to hang around."

"I'd just like to see it."

Rumble led the way. He knew the land better than I did because I hadn't had much of a chance to explore. Most of my time in the Darkside had been spent hiding, running, or desperately trying to figure a way out. And yet, I had willingly come back. I definitely had issues.

But it felt good to be on Dubh's back and able to go wherever I liked without a gang of people watching me. The Darksiders could be intense sometimes. Rumble, on the other hand, had a knack of disappearing even when he was right next to me. He never crowded or bugged me. Drake was too concerned with his own thoughts to bother me, and Brendan had begun to treat me as though I were more on par with him. He had always been indulgent, but he had accepted that I was in charge of my own people even before I killed Sadler.

"Are we in danger in the Darkside?" Drake asked, interrupting my thoughts. "Are there still rebels running around?"

Rumble looked at him. "Aren't there any in your territory?"

Drake glared but didn't respond. Hiding my smile, I urged Dubh forward to ride next to Rumble. We moved out of earshot of the others.

"Don't let him get to you," I advised. "Thanks to Deorad and Sadler, the Darksiders scream enemy to him. He'll get over it someday."

"I don't care what he thinks," Rumble said.

I wondered if he thought about the fact that he and Drake shared the same father. "You don't have to wear the helmet all the time, you know."

He jerked in the saddle. "Perhaps I want to."

"All of the time? Sometimes, you might be more comfortable without it."

"But others might not."

"I thought you didn't care what other people thought."

"Not all other people." He glanced at me. "I don't want to disturb my queen or princess."

"You wouldn't. I don't care, and Scarlet wouldn't even notice. She needs to know you. You're her uncle."

"You shouldn't say those things."

"Why not? It's true."

I rode on, leaving the others in my wake again. I relished the speed of Dubh, how he moved effortlessly. "Good boy," I whispered, holding on tight.

I leaned forward and let him take over. Riding was the only time I felt truly free, apart from when I ran, and I didn't get much of that lately. Before long, I grew guilty for leaving Rumble behind with the others, so I pulled the reins and forced Dubh to a stop. He shook his head and huffed, stamping his feet as he walked on. Something was up.

He wandered off the worn track and into the trees. It was eerily quiet. Even Dubh barely made a sound. A whimper sounded nearby, but it was quickly silenced. It occurred to me that there might be trouble, but Dubh generally led me _away_ from people trying to kill me.

"Hello?" I called out. "Is anybody there? Do you need help?"

Nobody answered, so I let Dubh lead the way. He suddenly made a lot of noise, almost as if he didn't want to creep up on whoever it was.

And then I saw her. At the base of a tree, a woman crouched, holding a baby in her arms. The baby's floppy arms and legs were stained with black pockmarks. It whimpered again, and the woman held it tighter.

I slipped off the horse's back and knelt by the woman. What on earth was she doing in the woods with such a small baby? Not that I was one to talk. I'd given birth in a forest.

She kept her head bowed. "Are you all right?" I asked. "Can I help?"

"Run," she said hoarsely. "Get out of here." She looked up at me then, and her bruised eyes widened.

"Who did this to you?" I asked, and then I realised I knew her. "Marie, right? You came from Fiadh's home to ask for a blessing. It is you, isn't it?"

"It worked," she said hoarsely. "I had a baby, but the child is sick, and I thought to take her away. But he followed. He's angry. He won't let any of us leave, so I snuck away, but someone must have told because he's here."

"Who? Who won't let you leave?"

"The master," she whispered. "He's out there, hunting me. He'll take the baby. He has others, but he wants them all."

My stomach turned. That man sounded like Sadler. "Who's the master?"

She blinked. "Glic. He tried to kill the queen, he said. Needs more men, so he's raising an army of his own. But look at my baby. She's sick. They're all sick. And we're starving. There's no food, no hope. I lost my way, and he's out there, in the woods. He'll kill me. You should run. You _must_ run. He wants you _dead_."

That explained a lot. No wonder the assassination attempt had failed if the hapless Glic had been in charge. "I'm not running from the likes of Glic. We're going to get you fed then send you back to court. Fiadh can take soldiers and deal with Glic. I'll find someone to help the baby. But don't worry, Marie. We'll figure this out. You don't have to be scared anymore."

A horn sounded. Marie burst into tears. "It's him. It's him already. He's coming. Run, please, run!"

"Get on the horse. Nobody can outrun Dubh."

"I can't," she whimpered, paralysed with fear. "I can't get up on that."

"Come on and walk then. We can't just stand here and wait for him to find us."

She was too frightened to argue any further. I helped her to her feet and led her by Dubh's side. Dubh was agitated, and I knew whoever was behind us was closing in. I just hoped Rumble and the others would find us first. I wasn't completely defenseless, but I was just one person.

The sounds of horses drew closer. My skin crawled. We were caught.

"Hide," I whispered. " _Now_ , Marie."

She crawled behind a tree and hid next to a thick fallen branch. I held Dubh's reins and waited, wishing the others would hurry the hell up. I might be better with weapons than I had been but not if I was massively outnumbered.

Glic burst into the clearing, closely followed by three others. All of them had been in Sadler's court. The fact they weren't in mine told me everything I needed to know.

When he saw me, Glic's mouth widened into a grin. "I go looking for vermin and find me the queen of them. It must be my lucky day."

I gripped my dagger tight. "Ready for that duel?"

He looked unsettled at this reminder of his past humiliation. "A duel?" he said at last. "This will be a massacre." He jumped off his horse, holding up his hand so the others wouldn't follow. "And she still thinks she has a chance. You may fool the idiots back in that pathetic excuse for a court, but you can't fool me. You're a human dressed up to be something you're not. And you destroyed my life, so it's only fair I take yours."

Dubh stamped his feet next to me. I let go of the reins as Glic stalked me. Dubh reared up, and Glic flinched.

"It's okay, Dubh," I said softly. "No need to scare him. He's already terrified."

Shouting with rage, Glic forgot himself and lunged at me with a short sword. I sidestepped out of his way then stepped toward him and sliced his wrist with the dagger before neatly moving out of his reach. With a cry of pain, he dropped his weapon, swearing as he backed away from me.

His men leapt off their horses and advanced on me. Then a whizzing noise sounded, and Glic's head rocked back in one violent movement. One of Bran's daggers was embedded in his throat. His eyes were unseeing as he dropped to his knees. Dubh ran in front of me and kicked with his back legs, knocking one of Glic's soldiers onto his back. Rumble reached us, and the soldiers forgot about me.

Silently, which was somehow much more intimidating, Rumble jumped to the ground and swung his sword in a single swift motion, fatally wounding one soldier and disarming the second. The third jumped on Rumble's back. Rumble backed up against a tree as hard as he could. The sound of bones breaking made me cringe. A fourth came for me, whirling her two-handed sword as if it weighed nothing.

I braced myself, but as she swung, so did Dymphna from her horse. The swords clashed and vibrated. I kicked the soldier, and she stumbled, still trying to balance her sword. "Thanks," I called out to Dymphna as she leapt to the ground and advanced on the soldier.

"Not a problem." Dymphna knocked the soldier's legs out from under her and ended her life with one heavy thrust into the woman's chest.

The fight was over before Brendan and Drake could even dismount. Brendan looked dissatisfied. He needed to release his bloodlust. My emotions were all over the place, so I likely wasn't helping. I made a concerted effort to calm down.

I nodded at Bran. "So you do come in useful, after all."

He grinned, pleased with himself.

"How do you manage to find trouble wherever you go?" Brendan asked harshly.

"It's a gift. I found an old friend who needs help." I called out for Marie, telling her it was safe, but she refused to budge until I helped her up. "Glic thought he was going to build himself an army and take over," I explained to the others. "He's also the one who tried to have me killed. Anyway, Marie escaped and got this far." I squeezed her shoulder. "That was so brave of you, Marie. We're going to sit here and feed you, and then we're taking you back to court where you'll be safe. Okay?"

Brendan tutted, still agitated. "We don't have time."

"We're going to the sinkhole," I said. "While we do that, Rumble can take Dubh and bring Marie and her baby to court. He can meet us back here. It won't take long on Dubh."

"I can't," Marie whimpered.

"You can," I said firmly. "You have to. Your baby needs shelter and medicine. You're going to do this for me because Fiadh needs to know what Glic's been doing in her absence. She has to take back her home before somebody else steps up. I need you, Marie."

"No, I can't see Fiadh." Her hands trembled so much that I took the baby from her. "She knows what he's done. She'll know everything."

"Fiadh's a mother, too. She'll only know how to help you with your baby."

"You don't understand." Tears rolled down her cheeks, leaving streaks in the dirt stains. "This is Glic's daughter. Fiadh will kill us both."

"Fiadh wouldn't—"

"Please don't send me to her. _Please_."

"All right," I said gently. "Will you go to the human realm instead? If I send you to my daughter, will you feel safer?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "Anything but the lady herself."

I sighed, wishing Marie understood that Fiadh wasn't anything like Glic. "Right. Change of plan. Rumble will take you to my family in the human realm. Then he can warn Fiadh about Glic and come back to us. When it's all done, we'll sort everything out with Fiadh." I gave Marie a warm smile. "Don't worry. I won't let any harm come to your baby. What's her name?"

"I... I didn't give her one. Glic said we shouldn't, and—"

"Forget him," I said, seeing her grow agitated. "You can figure out a name while you spend time with my family."

"Thank you." She took the baby back and smiled. "My grandmother's name was Liliana. You wouldn't know it to look at me, but she was known as a great beauty. Maybe... would that name be all right?"

I patted her arm. "It's a lovely name."

"She's half-starved," Dymphna said. "She can't feed that child if she can't even feed herself. I'll prepare a meal for her."

Rumble took me aside. "I'm not comfortable with this."

"It won't take you long. Not on Dubh."

"But you'll be alone."

"There are four other people here. I'll be fine. Don't you trust me?"

He grunted. "I _will_ do it. I just wanted you to know I'm not happy about it."

"Okay. Eat before you leave. I know Marie's a nervous wreck, but we can't leave her out here with a new baby."

"Fine," he said abruptly then left me standing there alone.

Shaking my head, I made to join the others, but then I saw Brendan wander off into the woods alone. I followed him. "You okay?"

He clenched his fists. "I'll be fine."

"Go hunt something if you need to."

He looked at me. "Am I so obvious?"

"Yes." I grinned. "And next time, get to me faster."

Brendan gave a little growl and advanced on me, pinning me to a tree. "Fast enough?"

My heart raced at the proximity and the dark look in his eyes. "No," I said teasingly.

A smile crept across his face. "I always knew you were trouble. Do you have any more dances with death planned on this journey?"

"Well, I have to keep you on your toes, or you might get bored, so who knows?"

He leaned closer, that wild look he got whenever he was restless flashing in his eyes. "There are other ways to keep me entertained."

"Like what?" I reached up and tapped his chin.

He blinked a couple times, his eyes dilating. "You really have to stop doing that, Cara. It makes it hard to think straight."

"I'm not doing anything."

Brendan looked down on me suspiciously. "Are you sure about that?"

"Pretty sure," I said, cheeks burning. "Not on purpose anyway."

His smile grew delighted. "Ah. Is it the rush from the danger then?"

I bit back a smile. "Why? Are _you_ dangerous?"

He pinched my chin, his expression shifting again. "Only sometimes, Darksider queen."

Standing up straight, I leaned into him with an attitude of defiance. "Are queens a problem for you now?"

He grinned. "Only sometimes."

Dymphna called out my name, and Brendan let me go. "I'll hunt," he said. "If you leave, I'll follow and catch up to you."

Then he was gone, and I couldn't wipe the smile off my stupid face.

# Chapter 15

Marie worked up the courage to speak after she had filled her belly. Her baby mewled but didn't cry properly. I wasn't even sure if the Miacha could help her, and I wished Glic would come back to life so _I_ could kill him. Who were these men to think the world owed them something? When Marie had first come to me, she thought she wasn't a real woman because she couldn't get pregnant, and now it had happened, and her child was dying because of the blight. None of it was fair.

"I can't believe he's dead," she said almost under her breath.

I leaned closer to hear her better. "He can't hurt you anymore. You're safe now, Marie."

But she didn't believe me. I could see it in her eyes. "He was planning your death," she said, gazing at her child's face.

"It's over now."

"Someone will always think they can do a better job than you." She looked up at me. "You're not safe, either."

"Didn't you see Rumble fight? Nobody's safer than me." I smiled. "And he's going to protect you for me."

"For now."

I couldn't bring her out of her unhappiness, so I packed her off with Dubh as soon as I could. Rumble held Marie secure, and she clung to her baby.

I touched her hand. "Next time I see you, you can tell me her name."

Marie's smile was weak, but at least it existed. I touched Rumble's arm. "Keep her safe for me, no matter what. We'll meet you back here tomorrow."

Rumble nodded. "Sleep with one eye open until I return." He dug in his heels, then Dubh was off and away, soon out of sight.

Bran made a snort of indignation. "'Sleep with one eye open.' Who does he think he is?"

"My bodyguard," I said, sinking next to him.

"You didn't die on _my_ watch."

"That I didn't." I exchanged an amused smile with Dymphna.

"Rumble is good at what he does," Dymphna said. "He has seen things you haven't, Bran."

Brendan returned. "I already ate," he said when Drake offered him some food. "We should move on. We won't want to camp for the night anywhere near a sinkhole."

He was calmer than he had been when he left. There was so much I had to learn about the faery realm. I didn't understand why bloodlust and other impulses existed.

We packed up and moved on, five of us this time. The Darkside always seemed to separate my friends. It was strange how we kept letting it.

"She seemed scared of Fiadh," I said as we rode along a narrow path through a forest. I was unable to shake off a strange, uneasy feeling.

"She was very concerned," Dymphna said.

"The father had her terrified," Drake said. "Glic probably filled her head with all sorts of notions."

"Poor Marie." I shook my head. "Fiadh knows better than to blame the woman for her husband's actions. It's not like they love each other."

"Enough about love," Brendan said with a scowl.

"What's up with you?" I asked.

"Nothing."

I frowned and urged my horse on, but he was no Dubh, and Bran was able to keep up with me.

"I told you," he said with a broad grin on his face.

"Told me what?"

"That I know how to use my weapons."

I laughed. "Oh, that. You did well."

"It was only because you hesitated," he said.

"I did not hesitate."

"You could have killed him, but you merely defended yourself. You hesitated when you should have taken the advantage."

"Maybe I'm sick of having blood on my hands, Bran."

"Maybe you should get used to it."

I sucked in a breath. "Go away."

"No."

"Loser."

"Very mature, Queen of the Darkside."

I reached out and slapped the back of his head before he realised what I was doing.

He rubbed his head. "So ladylike, too."

"Must I separate you?" Dymphna joked as she matched our pace.

"He's just so annoying."

"She's just mad I saved her life," Bran said.

I was mad because I really had hesitated, thinking of the blackness in my veins spreading farther.

Dymphna nodded. "I've noticed she doesn't like that."

"Shouldn't you two be shadowing your kings?" I asked snappishly. "You might catch the blight off me."

A gasp escaped Bran's lips as he moved ahead of us on the path, getting in my way. Thinking he'd done it on purpose to annoy me, I urged my horse past him and almost fell off in my shock as the forest abruptly ended.

Stretched out ahead of us was a large, empty space in the ground, at least two miles long and broad.

"Look at it," I murmured. I moved as close as I dared.

Brendan got off his horse and inched toward the edge. Stones crumbled down. "I can't see the bottom. If this keeps happening, there will be mayhem."

"Then let's get to the solution as soon as possible," Drake said.

"The gardener told me the land rots from underneath and that this place was abandoned a while back because of that. We're still not sure if anyone was here when it happened." I shuddered as I looked at the gaping hole. "I hope not."

"They wouldn't have suffered," Drake said. "They couldn't have survived the drop."

A smell slowly emerged from the hole.

"What _is_ that stench?" Bran asked, wrinkling his nose.

"Whatever's beneath us," Brendan said. "It might be too late to save this land."

"We won't know until we try," I said. "Let's take a quick look around and see if there are any other signs of impending disaster, but then we should return to camp and rest for the night. Rumble will be back tomorrow, and we can find the Watcher's tunnel after that."

The others moved on, but Brendan hesitated. "You should never have come to the Fade for me. If I had known it would cause this..."

I gazed at him, trying to imagine the world without him. "I would still have done it, Brendan."

"Then you're a fool." He looked pained.

I forced myself to smile. "So they say. Now can we go?"

He gripped my horse's bridle. "You're a good friend, Cara."

I laid my hand on his, wishing I could be more than a friend to him. Neither of us moved until the horse whinnied, and Brendan seemed to snap out of a spell. "You're right. We should move on."

We set up camp for the night in the same spot so we could wait for Rumble to return.

"This feels like a waste of time," Brendan said as Bran started the fire.

"We need to wait for Comhaill."

"Comhaill?"

"Oh, that's Rumble's real name. I used to call him Rumble in my head because his voice is all... rumbly, and it kind of stuck."

Brendan gave me an astonished look. "Why didn't you just ask him his name?"

"Deorad's children have no names," I said without thinking. "He barely remembered the name his mother gave him. The children would give each other nicknames. Like Vix."

"Deorad was a madman," Brendan muttered.

"He was a product of Sadler's influence," I said. "Sadler encouraged him and probably even told him what to do. He was punishing Deorad. He was punishing everyone."

Brendan scowled.

"But it worked out in the end. I know Scarlet's safe in the Darkside because half the court is related to her."

"You call them relatives," Drake said scornfully. "They're nothing."

"So Sadler told me," I snapped. "Tell me more, Drake."

"Don't start." Drake gazed at the fire. "Those people are nothing to me."

"Your loss," I said smartly. "They're everything to me."

"People wonder how you do that," Dymphna said. "How you can care for the savages."

"The fae are the fae to me," I said. "All shades of the same colour spectrum. I saw savagery on my first night with the fae, back at the festival. Not a lot can top that."

"I can see that," Dymphna said. "But your capacity for forgiveness always surprised me."

"I should have reached full capacity after you tried to kill me," I said wryly. "But we have to get over ourselves now. There are more important problems."

"Will this Watcher really be able to help?" Bran said. "Who is he?"

"He watches," Drake said in a faraway voice. "He stops the Hauntings from flooding the realm. He's neither human nor fae, so it stands to reason he has information the rest of the realm doesn't."

"He's certainly an enigma," Brendan said. "I just worry how far this journey will take us."

"I prefer this to sitting at court listening to people argue." I slipped off my boots. "I don't know how you two haven't lost your minds."

"It can grow tedious," Brendan said with a smile. "But I'm sure you're manipulative enough to manage."

"They let me off easy because I gave them Scarlet. It's amazing what an heir does." I looked at Drake and cleared my throat. "But, um, there's no rush, right?"

He stared back, looking uneasy. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just that... maybe people should wait to have children until this blight situation is sorted."

Drake's expression was still suspicious.

I raised my eyebrow at Brendan, who added his voice to mine. "Cara has more experience with these suffering children," he said. "Perhaps you should listen this once."

"This once," Drake scoffed. "The two of you would tell me what to do for the rest of my life if I let you." He stormed off into the darkness.

Dymphna rose wearily to her feet to follow.

"You too," Brendan told Bran, who reluctantly headed after Dymphna. "What is it?" Brendan asked, moving to sit next to me. "What are you afraid of?"

"The mirror," I whispered. "I saw Sorcha dying in childbirth in the mirror. It could come true."

"Why would you care?"

I pulled my knees to my chest. "I don't know. It just seems wrong to let it happen. I told her, but she doesn't care. Maybe she doesn't believe me. I don't know. But her child will be Scarlet's sibling, and as much as I love to be angry with Drake, I don't want his wife and child to die."

Brendan looked taken aback. "You truly amaze me sometimes."

"Maybe you need to spend more time in the human realm then. I've been told they're trying for an heir, and I think she loves him."

"The banshee?" He raised a brow. "That's unlikely. She loves power."

"Remember when Cathal poisoned my wine? Drake drank it, and Sorcha was devastated. She killed that lineage consultant arsehole in front of everyone because she was so upset. I'm telling you, she loves Drake."

"And what about you? I seem to recall you were upset, too."

I blinked. "Not upset enough to kill anyone." I thought of Rat's murderer and looked away.

"What's troubling you?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

He slipped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer to him. "All right."

I couldn't help leaning against him. "I'm not the same as I was, Brendan."

"Nobody stays the same."

"I'm not _good_."

"The fact you're worried about that makes me think you are still the same Cara," he said gently. "If you weren't good, why would it even concern you?"

I smiled. "And you call me manipulative."

"I'm not lying."

"I know." I resisted the urge to sink into his arms and stay there. My feelings had been changing so slowly that they had surprised even me. "Do you ever wonder what would have happened if he hadn't been able to hold on to his body, or if you had been summoned to a different body instead?"

"All the time."

We sat there in companionable silence until we heard the others. I was starting to understand that he had always been there for me when I needed him, but I'd waited too long and lost the courage to make anything happen between us.

When I woke up the next morning, Rumble was asleep next to me. Dubh was gnawing on grass, and everyone else was still asleep. I debated waking Rumble, but when I sat up, his eyes opened.

"Hey," I whispered. "You're back early."

"I didn't wait."

"Is Marie okay?"

He nodded. "I left her under the care of Líle and Vix. The Miacha woman is caring for the baby, but she didn't seem hopeful."

"Did you go to court?"

"I warned Fiadh of what was happening in her territory. As far as I know, she's planning to return this week to root out any remaining traitors."

"Okay. Was everything else all right?"

"No problems as of yet," he said.

"You must be exhausted."

"I never need much sleep. Was all well in my absence?"

"Yeah." I shifted positions to get more comfortable. "We saw the sinkhole. It was all kinds of terrifying. It could happen anywhere."

He nodded. "You're sure we can solve these problems before they cause more chaos."

"Chaos," I muttered. "Do you think this god of Sadler's is doing all of this?"

"Yes."

"Me, too. Does that mean we have to fight him to get this to stop?"

"Perhaps."

"So, how do we stop a god?" I asked.

He stared at me. "I have no idea."

"Try to rest. The others will be up soon."

He closed his eyes. I tried to relax, but it was pointless. I had too much on my mind. Defeating a god seemed out of the realm of possibility, even if some old stories and a random comment from Líle made it seem as if we had a chance.

As the morning brightened, I snuck away from camp to bathe in a nearby stream. Dubh followed and grazed close by after inspecting the water. I floated, remembering all the journeys I had been on before in the faery realm. Maybe I was too stuck in the past. I stepped out of the stream. It was time to look ahead.

Dubh suddenly neighed as though furious and ran at something. A voice shouted out in pain. I quickly dressed then went to see what was going on.

Dubh had a hold of Bran, who was looking sheepish. "I was just looking for you," he protested. "The horse is crazy."

"He's a good horse," I said.

Dubh released Bran, who rubbed his shoulder and glared. "We're having breakfast and then leaving." He turned and headed back to camp.

I patted Dubh's nose. "The best horse," I whispered.

Dubh and I strolled back to camp as I plaited my wet hair as best I could without a mirror. The smell of breakfast had my stomach growling. Everyone was up, and Bran was still scowling.

Brendan gave me a quizzical look. "What did you do to Bran? I merely sent him to find you."

"Well, Dubh objected to him spying on me while I bathed," I teased.

Colour flooded Bran's cheeks. "I wasn't spying! I didn't see anything, I swear!"

I giggled at the look on his face. "Relax. This is the kind of glorious payback that happens to people who bother me all day long. Dubh just has a sense of humour, and you apparently don't."

Bran grumbled under his breath—something about never bringing treats to contrary horses again. Within an hour, we were back on the road, this time looking for the entrance to the Watcher's tunnel. Brendan and Drake didn't remember the way as clearly as they'd both imagined they would, but I eventually caught sight of a familiar copse of trees.

"I think it's this way," I said, leading the others. Dubh snorted as if in agreement and upped his pace.

Brendan kept pace with me. "This is the longest Bran has gone without speaking, I'll have you know."

I glanced over my shoulder and laughed. "He'll get over it."

"Will that woman's baby survive? It looked so ill."

"That's how most babies on the Darkside look. I hope she'll be okay. The Miacha have been pretty good at helping."

"I'm sorry for them," he said. "There's no reason for children to suffer like this. I see now why your Darksiders see Scarlet as something of a miracle."

"I should thank you for what you did for her. You were kind of amazing."

He let out a surprised laugh. "Haven't I been telling you how amazing I am since we met? But really, I did nothing."

"You stopped me from acting like a demented person. Scarlet suffered because I wasn't thinking straight."

"You can't protect her from everything."

I kept my eyes straight ahead. "I can try."

Soon, we reached a familiar hillside. If I stood on Dubh's back, I would be able to see the castle and the Hollows.

"This isn't going to be pleasant," I warned the others when they caught up to us.

"It was never pleasant," Dymphna said.

"It'll be worse now. We'll all be alone, remember." I looked at Bran. "If you feel miserable or scared or anxious, it's because of the tunnel. It goes underground, so the worst of the blight affects it. Before, just one cave part of the tunnel was bad, but this time, the entire thing could be shitty. Are you ready?"

"If everyone else can do it, I can," he said.

"Rumble, you'll be most used to the sensation. I'll lead, and you take up the rear in case anyone gets the urge to run."

They all protested, but I remembered how low everyone had felt in the tunnel the last time we had been there. It had to be worse now, and I wasn't taking any chances.

"You'll take the rear," I repeated.

Rumble nodded, and before anyone could stop me, I headed to the mouth of the tunnel with Dubh. I drank in the sunshine and tried to remember how happy Scarlet made me. We would need to remember inside the tunnel.

"Just think of happy things," I said, stalling. "When you feel like killing the person in front of you, just think of a memory that makes you feel good and concentrate on that until we come out the other side."

I took a deep breath.

"We can do this," Dymphna said.

"I know," I said. "We should just get through it as quickly as possible."

I gripped the reins, and Dubh walked right into the tunnel. We all held lit torches, but the light couldn't penetrate the darkness no matter what we did. The shadows twisted and darkened. I urged Dubh to step as quickly as possible through the narrow tunnel, and I tried to take my own advice. As misery crept across my skin—a clammy sensation that made me instantly depressed—I thought of my daughter and the happiness I felt when I first saw her face and the joy of holding her and watching her smile. It helped through the first part of the tunnel, but I was surprised by how many times the face of a golden-haired king popped into my mind, too.

# Chapter 16

My torch died. As if by the same gust of wind, so did everyone else's.

"Just keep following me," I said. "Dubh will lead the way."

The others were so silent that I was afraid they weren't there anymore. Looking back wouldn't help because the cave was pitch-black and suffocating. It tasted like mould and felt like drowning. I knew all about drowning; I had almost accomplished that often enough.

Brendan started to hum a song that had been on my mp3 player. It seemed ridiculous in a blighted cave underground on the Darkside of the faery realm. I burst into nervous giggles.

"Really, Cara?" Drake said.

I heard the amusement in his voice, and my edgy nerves relaxed another inch.

"Sorry." My anxiety switched off as the giggles took over. And I knew exactly what to do. I pictured Scarlet in my arms, and I sent that feeling outward. It echoed against the walls and shrouded all of us.

"What are you thinking about?" Brendan asked, a strange note to his words.

"Scarlet, and her little face, and her little fingers, and her little chubby arms, and her little legs, and her little—"

"We get it," Bran said dryly.

"And that patch in her hair is adorable. I don't care what anyone says. And her funky little eyes." My voice died away as I remembered that the person who had given her those eyes was three horses behind me. "Anyway, I was thinking about her."

"What else?" Drake asked, his voice almost choked up.

Hesitating, I held on to the reins a little tighter. "She still has a baby smell. I can't get enough of it. I sniff her hair all the time. It's so weird, but she smells so good, like... like home."

"Where is home?" Brendan murmured.

I smiled in the dark. "Wherever she is. Once, back when we were staying in my grandparents' house, it was warm, so we went to the beach. And every time she touched the sand, she would screw up her nose like it was the grossest thing ever, but then she'd try to eat it a second later. And the water was kind of cold, but we went paddling, just where the waves lapped in, and she kept making this squealing sound whenever the water touched her toes. Anya was panicking because she thought Scarlet was crying, but she was laughing. It was like... she was so excited and nervous about the water that she couldn't get the laughter out quite right."

"I once brought Eithne to a zoo," Dymphna said. "With my husband. He said every child goes to the zoo, so we went, and it was awful. The animals were so depressed that I thought about setting them free."

I burst out laughing again. "Did you go to the farm?"

"Yes. It was very odd. Did you know there's a fake cow there?"

"I'll have to take Scarlet when she's a bit older."

"That's what I liked about the human realm," Dymphna said wistfully. "Parents do things with their children. They don't send them away or ignore them. They expect to love them, and they try to make them happy. When Eithne hugs me, I feel like something inside of me is melting, and I want to do whatever I can to make her happy."

"There are so many fun places to take them," I said. "We should take the girls on trips to the human realm and bring Setanta."

"Isn't it lovely and warming how we're not invited," Brendan said, but I was too interested in the sudden light ahead of us to care.

"We're here," I said eagerly. "That was quicker than I remembered." I reached the entrance first, eager to get into the sunshine.

The Watcher rose from his seat on a fallen branch and tipped his cap at me. "Here at last. I've been waiting all day."

The Watcher's house was just as I remembered it. The Wife ran around making sure everything was just so for our dinner. The pale-pink twin pixies giggled and fluttered their eyelashes at the men. The Watcher's hound snored in front of the fire.

"How did you know we were coming?" I asked, digging into the stew as if I hadn't eaten in days.

"The birds." The Watcher winked. "They tell us many stories. How is Líle?"

"She's slowly getting better."

"Maybe someday, she'll be herself again," he said. "She suffered, that one. But she had the strength of will to hold on when others would have given up."

"Does she still have the other memories?"

"She'll always have them."

A shiver ran down my spine. Líle knew more than she let on.

"You know why we're here then," Brendan said, "and why we came to you."

"You want to know about the rift." The Watcher puffed on his pipe, much to the Wife's consternation. "And I'll tell you as soon as you're done eating. Wife, leave them be."

He went into the living room. The Wife grabbed the pixies by the ears to lead them out of the kitchen.

A scream sounded in the distance, and Bran jumped.

"It's okay," I said. "You'll get used to it. It's just the Hauntings."

"I wish we didn't have to pass through it again," Drake said.

He had been quiet since the cave. I wondered if I had made him feel as though he were missing out on Scarlet. The cruel, hard part of my heart hoped he felt awful. The logical side told me to let go of the bitterness, but I wasn't sure how to exist without it anymore.

"Let's hope the Watcher can tell us something we need to know," Brendan said.

"The cave wasn't so bad," Dymphna said. "I expected it to be worse."

"Cara helped." Drake stared at his full plate. "If you're all finished, let's talk to the Watcher and get moving." He rose and left us.

"Finish eating," Brendan said. "He's just in a mood."

When we had finished, we headed into the living room, where the Watcher was waiting by the fire. I had slept in that room, felt a great many different emotions in that room. The Wife had brought in chairs so that we could all sit around the Watcher in a semi-circle.

"This blight is a problem then," the Watcher said when he was done with his pipe.

"Just a little," Bran said shortly.

"Did we cause it?" Brendan asked. "Are we to blame for the rift widening?"

"Yes and no." The Watcher reached down to fondle the ears of his lanky hound. "The rift widened, and that is cause for alarm, but it couldn't have caused this much damage in such a short time, or I would never have let you pass in the first place."

"Then what is it?" Rumble asked. "What's destroying the land?"

"Something is accelerating the problem," the Watcher said.

"Like a god?" I asked.

The Watcher nodded, shifting uneasily in his seat.

"Can we close the rift?" Drake said. "Is that possible?"

"It could be." The Watcher closed his eyes for a moment. The Wife returned to the room, and he opened his eyes again.

"Tell them," she said. "Tell them about the Lia Fáil."

The name was familiar. "The monument thing?" I asked. "The stone landmark?"

"It is a stone," the Watcher said. "But it's not the same as what you seek."

I frowned, confused.

"What do we seek?" Dymphna asked.

"The stone of destiny," the Wife said. "The real Lia Fáil."

"Real," the Watcher echoed.

"I don't understand," Bran said.

The Watcher heaved a great sigh. "There's a monument in the human realm known as the Lia Fáil. They say it sings when a true king of Ireland stands on it. But it's a rendition of an imagined treasure."

"So it's not real," Drake said flatly.

"As with most things, fae treasures are not what they seem. Someone dedicated a monument to the Lia Fáil, but the true stone of destiny looks... common at first glance. It's a small stone, one of the legendary treasures, and it has a great deal of power."

"How does it work?" Brendan asked.

"The stone is of the earth," the Wife said. "It could stop the rift. It would use up vast amounts of its power to do so, but it could seal the rift forever."

"In theory," the Watcher added. "We don't know for sure. The treasures are dangerous and contrary. They won't be handled by those they dislike, and only the true ruler of the realm can reveal their real power."

I glanced at Brendan and Drake. Which one was the true ruler? "So, where is it?"

The Watcher smiled. "That I do not know. They say the treasures were hidden in four corners of the realm to stop any one faery from consuming all of that power. Those four treasures combined would change the world."

"Could they beat a god?" I asked. Everyone looked at me.

"She asks good questions," the Wife said, her ruddy cheeks lifting into a broad smile.

"The _human_." The Watcher smirked. "They say four gods hid four treasures to protect themselves, but nobody knows for sure. Many have tried to find all four treasures. Did none of you ever hear the stories?"

Brendan nodded. "But they're myths. Nobody has seen any of the treasures in a long time. Why would anyone believe them to be something other than children's stories?"

"Fairy-tales," I murmured.

"What makes you think they even exist?" Drake asked. "Or that we could find them? How could a stone seal the rift?"

"The legendary treasures are no ordinary objects, even though they may seem so at first glance. They are glamoured to protect themselves."

"Then how will we find them?" Bran asked.

"And why do you believe this stone could work?" Rumble asked.

The Watcher hesitated for a moment before looking at his wife. "Bring it to me." She left the room, and he went to the display cabinet and pulled out a piece of paper and a pencil. He drew on it then showed it to us. It was a kind of Celtic knot overlaying a cross.

"Those four circles are on an old heirloom of Fiadh's," I said.

"They represent the elements," the Watcher explained. "The fae were much more attuned to the world around them in the past. Many of the old ways have been lost. _This_ is an ancient image, a replica. The original is sentient, living. It represents the realm and its power, and it changes constantly."

He sketched an outline of the realm around the image to demonstrate. The cross touched all three courts, as well as neutral territory. That had to be a coincidence.

The Watcher tapped the page. "The cross is the centre of the realm. Some say that area used to be known as the crossroads. Each loop represents one treasure: earth, fire, air, or water. The white space on the page is the void. It's energy at its purest."

"What does that tell us?" I asked, fascinated by the image.

"For those of us who Watch, it tells us everything important."

I frowned at the phrasing. "Exactly how many things do you Watch?"

He lit his pipe. "She's right. You do ask good questions." But he didn't answer.

The Wife returned and held up what looked like a painting in a frame. It was the same image, but the white space was filled with black splotches, and the lines on the cross were wobbly in some places and smudged in others almost as though they were being slowly rubbed out.

"This is the original," the Watcher said, "and it tells us that we are suffering from a blight that will swallow up all of the energy and power in the realm."

"The magic is being lost?" Brendan asked.

Drake's expression darkened. "Or stolen?"

" _We_ are being lost to a void of darkness. Look at the circles of the knot. Air and water are almost completely overwhelmed, but the blackness never touches earth and fire."

"That's why you believe the stone will work," Drake said.

"Exactly. Fire may burn the darkness away, but earth chokes it. Fire needs to be created and wielded whereas earth exists all by itself. The stone is earth and therefore the greatest chance."

"But even if we find the stone and close the rift, the existing blight will remain," Rumble said.

"Unless it's dealt with," the Watcher said.

"If the stone is earth, can't it cleanse the earth?" I asked.

"Too much power will be lost when the rift is sealed. The stone of destiny will take centuries to recover from that."

I looked at Brendan, who nodded encouragingly. "I found a stick that cleans the darkness from people. Just holding it sort of takes some of the taint away. The Miacha told us the wood comes from the first tree, so we thought if we could find such a tree, then—what?"

The Watcher's face had turned red. "She found a stick, says she."

"It couldn't be the Sleá Bua," the Wife said. "How could she just fall over something like that?"

"The Spear of Lugh," the Watcher said with a laugh. "The fire element. A legendary treasure with the means to burn the void away. Yes, the tree could work."

"It's not a spear," I said. "It's just a pointy piece of wood."

"Perhaps you haven't looked at it carefully," he said. "The treasures won't reveal themselves before it's the right time. That's not how the magic works."

"Then how does it work?" I demanded. "Because I don't understand any of this."

"Where did you find the spear?" the Wife asked.

"Sadler had it."

"Then it can't be the Spear of Lugh," Drake said. "She found it in the Darkside, the very place that's been destroyed by the blight."

"It's how it's wielded that counts," the Wife said. "But you're mistaking fire for earth. Fire is used. Someone would have to use the spear to make it work. Earth, on the other hand, is always there. The tablet will naturally clean the earth around it."

A thought struck me. "Was Sadler trying to collect the legendary treasures?"

"For himself or his god?" Brendan muttered.

"We need to find that stone," Drake said. "We need to seal the rift before this void completely engulfs us. If Sadler's god is using it against us, then we need to take that power away."

"What part of the realm is untouched by the blight?" Dymphna asked.

Brendan stared at his hands. "Yvette's home hasn't been affected."

"And nobody thought this was weird?" I shook my head. "Wait. What if it really is in the human realm?"

"If we can't find the stone, we'll go to the human realm," Drake said. "But we should make use of this clue. The stone can't be harmed by the void, at least not yet, so we should look at the obvious places."

"I need to speak to Yvette about those old books anyway," Brendan said.

"We're going to have to travel to the Great Forest to meet with the Guardian," I said. "She can't be that far from there if she's in a part of your territory."

He nodded. "Is there anything else you can tell us?" he asked the Watcher.

"I'm sure there are plenty of things." The Watcher frowned. "The stone of destiny has a strong relationship with the land. And there was once no separation between the realms. The faery realm and the human realm coexisted for the good of all. Back then, the land was called Inis Fáil. We were one. We were many."

"The island of destiny," I said. "Just like the stone."

The Watcher smiled at me. "That's it. And they say it was the _stone_ that separated the realms. But the stone's power isn't just division of places. The stone heals and replenishes."

"If it can divide the faery realm from the human world, it could properly separate the Fade from this realm," I said.

"Some say four gods created four treasures," the Wife said, "but we only know for sure that Brighid was the _cause_ of that creation. She represents fertility and growth—healing, as it were—and your aim is to repair the rift. These treasures should protect the realm."

"Brighid's the one who separated the realms and doomed the fae," Brendan said darkly. "She took our power because we didn't deserve it, and she used a treasure to do _that_ , not protect us."

"Perhaps there was a lesson to be learned there," the Watcher said. "But the fae are always slow to learn their lessons, are they not?"

Brendan fell silent under the Watcher's knowing gaze.

"The stone and the island are linked," Drake said. "This is why you believe it will work."

"Well, the stone separated one world from another, and the Fade is a world, of sorts. The stone is my best suggestion."

"What about the other two treasures?" I asked. "What are they?"

"There's the Claíomh Solais. That's the sword of victory. He who wields it—and is worthy, mind you—can never fail. That's air. Water is the Coire Dagdae—Dagda's Cauldron. Some say a mortal once drank the blood of so many enemies out of the Coire Dagdae that he turned into a god."

I shuddered. "Can any of those help us?"

"I'm sure they could if they were easy to find. You're lucky to have one."

"If it's the right one," I said. "Could the spear cleanse the earth?"

"I think the spear was intended to cleanse the body."

"I used it for that. Black liquid was repelled from the man's body."

"Really now," the Watcher said, eyeing me carefully. "That's interesting. And did he die?"

"He was already dead. He was being kept alive by magic."

"A dark magic then," the Wife said. "The dead don't belong in this world."

"No, they don't," the Watcher said. "But we've heard stories."

"The ships?" Drake asked.

The Watcher nodded. "And if it's a god you've angered by using the spear, then you had better hurry before he figures out it's the stone you're after next."

"And if he comes at us again?"

"Then you'll need all four treasures just to stand a chance."

We slept in the Watcher's kitchen that night, but we stayed awake for a long time trying to digest what we had been told.

"It's a lot of maybes," I said. "But we've no other options."

"It makes a twisted kind of sense," Dymphna said. "For all we know, this stone separated the Fade from the rest of the world in the first place."

I felt myself growing excited. "I think we can do this. But the spear. Could it really be that pathetic-looking stick?"

"The stick you used to kill Deorad," Drake said in a flat voice, "was a legendary treasure."

"I dread to think what would have happened if she had used a dagger." Brendan looked at me. "You truly have the strangest luck."

"What happens to the stone when we've used it?" Rumble asked.

We all looked at each other. Four treasures with immense power existed while three kingdoms struggled to maintain their own power. The treasures could change everything.

"We... we'd have to hide it again," I said. "If somebody with the same desires as Sadler finds all of the treasures, the rest of us are screwed."

"If we found them all, we could each keep a treasure," Drake said, "and leave the last to be hidden by the Watcher."

"Do we trust each other enough with a treasure?" Brendan asked.

"We might have to," Drake said. "If we don't find the stone, we'll die. All of us—humans and fae."

"Is this why you hate Brighid?" I asked Brendan. "Because she separated the realms?"

He frowned. "There are many reasons to hate Brighid, but that one is as good as any."

I shivered at the coolness in his tone. What if we used the stone and managed to piss off Brighid? Then I thought of another possibility. "Anya's always saying that Brighid had a plan for me, for us. What if this is it? What if we were all led to this point just to clean up Sadler's mess?"

"Then why couldn't she have stopped Sadler in the first place?" Bran asked.

"Free will," Dymphna said. "The options are put in front of us, but it's up to us to make the choice. For right or wrong, our choices led us here."

We were quiet after that, and one by one, everyone fell asleep. Brendan sat up and stared into the fire the longest. I watched him as I nodded off. And when I slept, I dreamt of a goddess with three heads whispering to me to hurry up and find the stone of destiny before it was too late.

# Chapter 17

The plan became this: travel back through the tunnel to the Darkside, go to the Great Forest and look for the Guardian whom nobody really believed I had met, find out where the First Tree came from, and then go to Yvette's home—wherever that was—to seek out the stone that probably wasn't there. I had a strong feeling that if the stone were connected to Brighid, it would be hidden in the human realm. But everyone else was dead set on the stone being in the faery realm.

"What if he's lying?" Bran asked as we approached the tunnel.

"He's not," I said firmly, moving ahead. I didn't wait for the others.

The journey was worse this time, partly because I was too busy thinking about what the Watcher and his wife had told us. When I ignored everything around me, the misery didn't touch me at all, but I had forgotten about everyone else.

We reached the other side in silence. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Bran trembling. I looked at him in concern. The way the periwinkle in his veins had dimmed worried me. He toppled off his horse even as I was dismounting to go to him. I reached him first. He shook violently, his lower lip trembling and his hands clutching at his arms in an attempt to warm himself up. His teeth chattered. I pressed my hands against his cheeks and felt how cold he was. One of his wings was bent awkwardly beneath him, so I pulled him into a sitting position.

"It's over," I said, wrapping my arms around him. "It's over, Bran. I'm so sorry. I didn't think. You're okay. You're going to be okay."

He didn't say a word, and I concentrated on every time I had laughed and felt warm. It came easier this time, as though practice made it second nature to use my emotions and memories as a tool.

I murmured words in his ear, and he wrapped his arms around me, too, holding on tight. Colour returned to his wings, and the shivering gradually stopped.

"You okay?" I asked, pulling away to look at him. What had Brendan been thinking by bringing him with us?

Bran nodded, his face young and vulnerable and shocked. He looked over my shoulder and cleared his throat then made to get up. I realised I was basically sitting in his lap, so I moved aside and helped him to his feet. I noticed everyone else watching.

"What?" I said, brushing imaginary dirt off my trousers. "Let's go."

I didn't wait. I climbed onto Dubh's back and let him lead us out of there and away from that awful tunnel.

We rode until late. We had almost reached the Hollows when we stopped.

"It's strange," I whispered, "how different everything is since the first time we came here."

"Everything has changed," Drake said. "I sometimes wonder what would have happened if we hadn't taken that journey."

I looked over my shoulder, but the others were out of earshot. "What do you mean?"

"I would be king of the realm. Sadler wouldn't have had a chance to get branded. I wouldn't have married... who I married."

"But Brendan would be stuck in the Fade."

"Brendan," he said bitterly. "The one who always wins."

"He's suffered," I said, surprised by the anger in his eyes.

"And he's been slowly taking everything from me since he returned."

"You took a chunk of his kingdom," I said. "And his banshee. And his daoine sídhe. He hasn't taken anything from you."

"If you can't see what he's doing, then you're a fool."

"You always want to blame other people. Have you ever stopped to think about everything you've given away?"

I rode on, desperate to be away from him and my complicated feelings toward him. Sometimes I hated him so much, and then I felt guilty because of Scarlet. His sadness made me feel guilty when I warmed to Brendan or when I was happy or when I got to have the things he hadn't wanted. It was easier to never be around him. I worried he might never stop warping everything I felt just by his presence.

I slowed at the mouth of the Hollows. The twin mountains rose up around me. Every time we had passed through them, we had been attacked. There was nothing but death at the Hollows, and that had to change. I stepped onto the path on my black faery horse, wearing my black riding clothes, and I held my head high. The Hollows belonged to my family now, and I had nothing to be scared of. But there were still eyes in the pockets scattered across the mountains. The Hollow Hills was a hiding place for pathetically deformed creatures who had been transformed by the blight, although now they saw me as their leader. It was probably too late to save them from their fate, but I could stop the same thing from happening to anyone else. I thought of Scarlet and Setanta and Marie's limp baby. Never again would the children of the Darkside be forgotten.

I called out to whomever was left, "There's food at the castle. Tell them I sent you." But even as I said it, I knew they wouldn't go. And nobody wanted to see what Sadler had done. I would have to force myself to look at them.

I was halfway through when the others caught up. I halted Dubh and waited for them. A whisper sounded across the hills, but it died down when Rumble reached my side. We carried on in single file, each court represented, and we reached the end unmolested.

"Well," Brendan said when we were clear. "That was a first."

"We can camp nearby," I said as the first peek of a lilac moon began to appear. "It's late."

We settled down in a place where I had camped before. It was seemingly untouched by the blight, but when we made a fire from wood we found close by, a tart smell rose from the black and sticky embers.

I made sure to sit next to Bran, who was still looking shell-shocked. "You doing okay?" I asked as I passed him a cup of tea.

He nodded, staring into the fire. He wrapped his fingers around the cup. "I've never felt anything like it." He looked at me as though for the first time. "Thank you."

"There are some advantages to having a human around on the Darkside," I said with a smile.

"You heard the Watcher," Brendan said, eyeing us over the fire. "We were meant to be as one. It's no coincidence that humans have borne the fae some of the strongest offspring."

I couldn't stop myself from glancing at Drake when I heard that.

"If it wasn't for Cara, we would never have made it past the Black Marshes," Dymphna said.

"If it wasn't for Cara, we wouldn't have journeyed to the Fade at all," Drake said, in the same bitter tone he had spoken with earlier.

Brendan raised his cup. "Then I am grateful that humans are the most loyal creatures in the realm."

"Apart from sprites and brownies," I said.

He laughed. "And the occasional special pixie."

"To humans," Bran said. "For... the things they can do that we cannot."

"Shut up now." I was grinning. "We can't even do proper magic."

"Magic is overrated." Brendan sounded as if he might even mean it. "So," he added after a moment, "where do we go first?"

"The Guardian kind of found me last time," I said. "I was on the run from what I think were clurichaun, and I kind of bumped into him. But he took Brighid's flower from me and planted it by his tree. If we can find the flowers, we'll find him. If not, we can just ask every tree we pass."

"Why do I get the feeling she's being serious?" Dymphna asked.

"Because she is," Rumble said. "It will be a long journey."

"Wouldn't it be great if the first trees happened to be right next to the stone?" I yawned. "Where does this Yvette person live anyway?"

Brendan raised his brows. "This Yvette person lives at the very corner of the realm, a place that wasn't even liveable in my day. Her entire clan lives there, and they've built up quite a fortress to protect themselves."

"How come nobody knows them?"

"They are a private people." But a glimpse of uncertainty crossed his face.

"There used to be a library there," Bran said. "I remember hearing stories of it as a child."

"The tower," Brendan said. "I had half forgotten it. It was huge, more like a temple than a tower. It housed artefacts and ancient books."

I perked up. "A perfect place to keep a legendary treasure. And those old stories about the treasures."

Brendan shrugged. "One would hope. But it's a library no longer. They may have kept everything in the library intact, but it's a home now."

"It sounds more like a kingdom," Dymphna said. "A fortress, an army, a clan nobody really knows. Where did they come from? What bloodlines do they belong to? What kind of power do they have?"

"The lineage consultant assured me that they've been rooted there for a long time. They've established themselves. They have wealth and power and a fertile piece of land." He frowned again. "But it wasn't fertile before. I remember visiting once with my parents. We were on a tour of the realm, and my mother wanted us to see the library."

"What was it like?" Drake asked.

"The land was a rock in the middle of the ocean. I remember thinking it looked as though someone had arbitrarily pinned it there. It didn't seem like a part of the realm. One foot in a certain direction, and you found yourself in a permanent thunderstorm. The sea lashed against the rocks as if trying to destroy it. I don't know how the library could have been built because we had to walk up uneven steps cut in the rock to reach the building. It was almost like a lighthouse. My mother told me that on a clear day, you could see the entire realm from the top of the library. That was why it was so special. But it was perched there, as though it could topple over at any time, and I thought it was a terrible place to house the realm's most prized possessions."

"What was inside?" I asked.

His eyes glazed over. "I don't remember."

I didn't believe him, but I didn't push the issue.

"How could a thriving clan survive on a rock?" Rumble asked.

"That was a long time ago," Brendan said. "Most of the land has changed. Perhaps my memories of the old maps are wrong."

"How will we know where to look?" Bran asked. "How will we even know if we see this stone of destiny?"

"In the old tales my people tell," Dymphna said, "the treasures disguise themselves from those seeking power and show themselves to those on a noble quest." She smiled. "This is a rather noble quest. Perhaps the treasures will make themselves obvious."

"The spear didn't show itself to me as anything but a piece of wood," I said.

"Then why did you use it on Deoard?" Drake asked.

"It's hard to describe." I frowned as I thought back. "I was drawn to this little jewellery box. There were bits of crap inside, and I just felt like it was important. When I touched the stick, I felt strange, and then I saw it." I held out my hand and flexed my fingers. "I left a black handprint, and the wood just soaked it up."

That sparked another memory I had forgotten. "Ronnie once told me that the fae's greatest treasures look plain and ordinary. That they keep their weaknesses close. I got it into my head that Sadler was keeping the stick for a reason, so I took it. And when he noticed, he freaked out. Bekind hid it for me, and Sadler went on a rampage around the castle. He thought Ronnie had taken it, I think. She was living in the castle because he was letting her torture Deorad. She thought I was having her child. It was really weird. Anyway, when Sadler sought her out, she was already gone. That's how I knew the stick was important. And it had to have something to do with Deorad or he wouldn't have gone crazy looking for Ronnie."

"Maybe the spear didn't want him to find it," Bran said.

I shivered to think of the little wooden stick having a mind of its own.

That night, I slept between Rumble and Bran. Away from the court, all of the separation rules had melted away, and we were back to camping together like seminormal people.

I dreamt I was in Brighid's garden again. Three women were running and giggling as I chased them. "Wait!" I called out. "I can't remember the rules!"

A hand on my shoulder froze me to the spot. I couldn't see the women anymore.

"The stone," one of them whispered into my ear.

"The sword," the second said from somewhere behind me.

"The cup," the third said from my feet.

I couldn't move anything but my mouth. "There's a spear," I said. "You forgot the spear."

"You already know it," they said as one. "It's already ours. Three more, and then it's done."

"Then what's done?" I asked, but I already understood in the dream.

"The power will be ours, and you will choose your reward."

I suddenly realised I wasn't alone in the garden. There was someone else hearing the same instructions.

"The child?" the new voice said. "That's all it will take?"

"Everything we want will be ours."

I blinked, confused. Had they ever been talking to me?

"No," a voice whispered in my head. The other conversations looped as if on repeat, but the voice in my head was different. It spoke only to me. "No," was all it said. "No, no, no, no, no..."

I sat up straight, my heart racing. Screw the faery realm and the messed-up dreams it gave me.

"Bad dream?" Brendan asked from the fire.

My mind cleared as I looked around me. Camp. Right. Everyone was asleep but Brendan.

"Want some tea?" he asked, giving me a curious look.

Nodding, I climbed over Bran's wings and joined Brendan at the dying fire.

"It's late," I said.

"Did you dream?"

"I think so. It was weird. It didn't make sense."

"There must be something in the air out here that gets into our minds without us realising." He handed me the cup. "I dreamt of your hounds. Those animals were growing before my eyes, I could swear it." He glanced at me. "It was a good gift."

"You gave me a good gift, too."

"I had another at first, but it didn't seem appropriate. Although when I heard of the cú sídhe, I wished I had stayed with my original idea."

"What was the gift?"

The corner of his mouth lifted. "Perhaps I'll give it to you in the future instead."

"You didn't need to give me anything. But I appreciated it. I thought maybe you wouldn't show up to the ceremony."

"We've all come too far to give up on one another now."

I took a sip of hot tea and burned my mouth. I looked at Brendan. He was in a pensive mood. "Are you looking forward to seeing Yvette again?"

"That's an odd question." He didn't meet my eye.

"It sounded pretty normal to me."

"Odd for _you_ to ask."

"They told me what will happen if you marry her, and what will happen if you don't."

His lips pressed together in a line before he replied, "I'm sure they did."

"You told the lineage consultant that you would never marry."

"I did. And I meant it then."

"But not now?"

"You must have learned by now that a crown is a prison," he said softly. "My decisions and actions have to come from a place that is good for the realm and for my kingdom before I do what's good for me personally."

"None of us want to be miserable forever. Your parents loved each other, didn't they?"

"They did, and they kept it a secret as much as possible. It was a badly kept secret, to be fair, and it was why the realm was eager for them to move on despite their popularity. They thought I would be a better king because I was the heartless one. How foolish I was instead."

"Do you think they regretted anything?"

"No," he said. "They were so consumed with each other that it became harder for them to rule. They wanted to consider each other's feelings before the realm, and that couldn't be allowed. Even I thought ill of them, the sentimental pair. Sometimes, I think I felt left out, and that made me... opposed to their way of life. I didn't understand."

"Marriage sounds terrifying either way."

"At last, we agree on something." He took my hand. "And I'm sorry you're the one with experience."

I squeezed his hand. "Marriage is pretty bad when you hate each other. There's never a moment when you can be content or feel safe. At least, if you trust the person, you have someone you can talk to who will listen to you."

"Will you ever forget how badly Sadler treated you?"

"I don't think I _should_ forget it. If I forget, I might turn into him."

"That would never happen. Your conscience is too loud."

I stared at the rings on my finger. "Even before I knew about the fae, I knew marriage wasn't for me. Having to spend so much time with another person—I imagined I would turn into my mother, lose my identity completely." I sucked in a breath. "And the rest."

"You would never let anyone hurt Scarlet."

I was the only one hurting people lately. Brendan looked depressed, and I wanted so badly for him to smile again.

"People don't fall in love straight away." I avoided his questioning gaze. "Sometimes, it builds up over the years and kind of creeps up on you."

"Does it?" he asked softly.

"Maybe, if you married her, that would happen for you. Maybe you would learn to love each other, and it wouldn't be so bad. What's good for the realm could be good for you, too."

"Is that what you really think?"

_No_.

"I'm going to bed. I'm tired." I leaned over to kiss his cheek. "You deserve to be happy. You've earned it. _That's_ what I really think. If marrying her would make you happy, then I'll be the first to wish you luck."

I didn't look over to see his reaction because I was too busy hiding mine.

# Chapter 18

Two days later, we found ourselves still fruitlessly searching the Great Forest for a flower that didn't seem to exist. Brendan and Drake decided to lead us to the place where they'd found me after my solo adventure.

"You must have some idea," Brendan said. "Look around. Does anything look familiar?"

"Everything's been looking familiar for the last two days," I said. "Let's just walk and see if anything... let's just go."

"The Guardian may not want to be found," Dymphna said as we walked on foot, leading the horses behind us.

"If the forest dies, where does that leave the Guardian?" I asked. "He has to want to help us."

But there was no sign of him or his tree spirits all morning.

"It's too hot to walk anymore," I complained.

Drake stretched out his silvery wings. "We'll stop as soon as we come upon a good place for the horses to drink."

By mid-afternoon, we were all done. We rested until the day grew cooler. We ate then relaxed, and the only sounds were the leaves rustling in the trees and the lapping of water. But there was something in the atmosphere that reminded me of the Darkside.

"I can feel it." My voice was loud in the relative silence. I sensed the others turning to me, but I stayed on the ground, staring up at the patches of sunshine and green. "It feels like the Darkside. The blight is here."

"I feel it, too," Bran said. "It reminds me of that tunnel."

"It's not that bad yet up here," I said, "but anything that lives underground must be suffering. Although the Watcher said that water and air were weakening. Maybe we're breathing in the blight and drinking it."

"He also said a stick was made of fire," Bran said. "Am I the only one who sees how little sense that makes?"

"It's figurative fire," Dymphna said. "The kind that can burn the blight from your body without a flame."

"We need to find the Guardian," Drake said, sounding frustrated. "Are you sure you met him, Cara?"

"He called himself the Guardian, and he came out of a tree. What more do you want? I gave him the flower, and he sent me to find you. They're listening."

"Who?" Dymphna asked.

"The trees." I lay back down. "They're always listening, and they talk to each other." I closed my eyes. The rustling sounded more like whispers, echoes of words we had said to one another. "If we wait, someone will come. We'll help each other. Everything will work out."

"I think she's had too much sun," Drake said. "Or someone slipped her some wine."

"Smartarse."

"Uh." Bran jumped to his feet. "Maybe you should all look at this."

I sat up and looked in the direction of his pointing finger. A transparent woman was hanging out of a tree, beckoning us to her. "Get your things," I said. "This is what we've been waiting for."

We were ready within minutes. The woman was gone by then, but a couple of trees down, another was waiting. As we approached, she reached out and touched the next tree then shrank back into her own. Another spirit-like woman came out of that tree, and so it went on until we came to a patch of land that felt free of the blight and was covered in Brighid's flowers.

"What now?" Brendan asked as the women disappeared.

"Wait," I whispered.

"This is all I have left," a deep voice said.

I turned my head and saw the Guardian move toward us.

"This is the last patch of pure land, and it's because of the flowers."

"The blight is spreading," I said. "That's why we're here. We need your help."

"I'm the one who needs help," the Guardian said miserably. "I'm the one who's dying."

"There's a way to stop it," Drake said. "The First Tree. It cleans the darkness. Where is it?"

"The First Tree?" The Guardian hesitated. "Yes, it could be the key, but it's been lost to this place. Those trees couldn't exist here, not after the change."

I had no idea what he was talking about. "Then where can we find one? If we find them, we'll bring some back to the forest to help you restore the land. All we need is to know where."

"Across the water. That's where they came from, and that's where they'll be."

Brendan and Drake exchanged a worried glance.

"You mean across the sea," Rumble said. "The forbidden lands."

"So far away, yet not far enough for some," the Guardian acknowledged.

"Will it work?" Brendan asked. "If we find the trees, will they grow here?"

"For as long as they're needed," the Guardian said. "But it may be too late. It takes time for the earth to replenish, and most of us don't have that kind of time. Not anymore."

"We have to try." I looked at the Guardian. "Don't give up yet."

"Bring me the tree, and I won't have to." He retreated and disappeared, and I was looking at a tree once again.

"Well," I said. "That was interesting."

"We don't have ships," Drake said. "How are we going to get across the water?"

"We could build one," Bran said doubtfully.

" _Buy_ one from the human realm," Rumble said.

"Yvette's family has a ship," Brendan said. "She made a point of telling me. I'll broker a deal with her if they don't offer it to us when we reach their land."

"We can't all go across the water," Drake said.

"No," Brendan said. "Only one of us should go. The others can bring the stone back to the rift, once we find it."

"Who goes on the ship?" I asked.

Brendan bowed his head. "I have no child or wife keeping me here. I will go across the sea."

My heart raced. "But it's dangerous."

"Living is dangerous," he said, smiling. "It will be an adventure, and the realm needs us to act. We need both the stone and the trees."

That was if either of them even worked. We were relying on the words of beings we assumed knew more than us.

"What if you can't find the First Tree?" I asked.

"I won't return until I do."

And I felt a piece of my heart crack at the words. If he left, he might never come back. But he was doing it so Drake and I didn't have to go.

I awoke feeling as though I were missing something. I sat up, frowning, and got up because I wasn't close to going back to sleep. Dubh had gone wandering, and everyone else was sound asleep.

I grabbed my bag and moved away from the others to rummage through my things and try to figure out what wasn't there. But everything was accounted for, and I even came across something I'd forgotten: the sword from Sadler's room of treasures and junk. I couldn't recall packing it.

"Looking for something?" Brendan asked, sitting next to me.

"Did I wake you? Sorry."

"Everyone else is asleep. What are you doing out here?"

I realised I was a good ways from camp. "I don't know. I woke up feeling weird, like I'd forgotten something. But then I found this."

"A badly made sword?"

I held it out, my arm steadier than it had ever been. Something about holding a weapon imbued me with confidence. "It's so light. It's perfect. I forgot all about it."

"Why do I want to touch it?"

His voice sounded so strained that I looked at him. He flexed his hands, his gaze on the sword.

"What are you on about?"

"I want to touch it so badly it hurts. Is it cursed?"

"Of course not," I scoffed.

"It might be cursed."

"Coward," I whispered because I was curious, too.

His eyes met mine at the dare. "I keep telling you you're trouble."

He laid his hand over mine, his larger fingers reaching the shaft. And then the sword changed.

I made to let go, but Brendan held on tight, his face full of wonder. The sword lengthened, widened, and sharpened, but it remained light to hold. The blade shimmered green, and the hilt became a jewelled masterpiece.

"This is it," he whispered. "This is the sword, Cara. This is the Claíomh Solais."

"The sword of victory? How could it be?"

"Didn't you see it? Didn't you just want to hold it? It woke us both, Cara. We felt it. It _wanted_ to be seen."

"This was Sadler's," I said under my breath.

"He must have been collecting the treasures."

"He had this and the spear. What if he had the stone, and I got rid of it?"

"It would have called to you as the other items did. Besides, the stone would have ensured fertile land around your castle."

"My castle," I said with a surprised giggle. "Still sounds so crazy. What do we do with _this_?"

Brendan reluctantly let go. "You keep it, and when I'm gone, I'll know you're safe with this by your side."

"You don't have to go. We could send a group of soldiers on that ship."

"How can I ask other men to do something I'm afraid of?" he said gently. "Besides, you and Drake and the others risked your lives numerous times to save me from the Fade. The least I can do is a little life-risking of my own."

I looked at the sword. I didn't want to give it up, and maybe that was exactly why I needed to. "Take the sword with you. We don't know what kind of danger you'll face when you leave. At least take the sword and have a chance. Whoever wields it will never lose. We can't afford for you to lose."

"Only the worthy can wield the sword," he said flatly.

"You're worthy." I nudged him. "I know you are."

"Says she who refers to herself as _just a human_ more often than not."

"Only to people stupid enough to listen to me. I don't want you to go, and you're going to go anyway, so don't turn me down twice. Take it." I held the sword out to him.

He gazed at it for a moment before giving me a mischievous glance, like a child about to do something wrong. Then his face fell. "I know where the spear is. I can't have this."

"What are you talking about?"

"We agreed one person can't have all of the treasures. It would be dishonest if I took this now."

I grabbed his hand and made him hold the hilt of the sword. "I trust you."

"You trust me with your life and with the treasures but not with your heart," he teased, but the look in his eyes was serious.

His attempt at humour fell flat. "I never learned how to do that, and when I tried, I got hurt. I believe you would never intentionally hurt me or Scarlet. That's enough for me."

"So you do trust me," he said as if looking for confirmation.

"I trust you—maybe more than anyone." It was myself I didn't trust. I didn't believe I would know when people meant what they said or if they wanted more than one night with me. I didn't trust myself to understand when I had been hanging on too long, or to have the sense to walk away at the right time. I wasn't equipped with those tools, so I didn't put myself in a position of needing to use them.

He frowned. "You used to speak your mind constantly. Now I have to figure you out. I find it troubling."

I pushed against his arm. "You already know me. Don't be silly."

He finally took the sword. It looked right in his hand. "But I'll be going soon. Out of sight, out of mind."

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

His eyes glittered in the moonlight, and I was suddenly terrified of what I was feeling. For a moment, I thought he was going to kiss me, and when he didn't, I felt disappointed—me, who had always been the one to push him away. But I wasn't the only one who had changed.

He stood up to leave. I reached up, took his hand, and held on, staring straight ahead of me. He waited.

"Be careful when you go away," I said. "It's better to be safe than brave."

"I'll have the sword, remember? What can go wrong?"

"Then don't forget to come back."

He squeezed my fingers and let go. He went back to camp, taking the sword with him. I wouldn't tell the others about it unless he did. I doubted Drake would understand. I was taking a lot of chances with Brendan. Maybe a small part of me was giving him enough rope to hang himself with. Maybe I was setting him up to disappoint me so I'd turn my back and harden my heart against him. But a growing part of me felt sure he wouldn't do anything to let me down.

We briefly separated so that Drake could check on his court and Brendan could organise a small force to accompany him across the water. He wasn't certain of volunteers, but he wasn't going to force anyone to travel with him. Rumble and I pressed on, unwilling to wait.

"What do you think?" I asked him as we rode. "About the treasures and everything else."

"Many fae are obsessed with old stories, myths, legends, and prophesies."

"Sadler once told me Deorad had some obsession with a prophesy. Maybe he had so many children because he thought one of them would turn out to fulfil it."

"Whatever reasons he had for doing the things he did, I doubt he truly understood them himself."

"Do you hate him?" I asked.

"No. I feel nothing for him. I was told early on I was nothing, attached to no one. He never played much of a part in my life."

"Do you hate Drake?"

He hesitated. "No, but I can't say I understand his actions."

"Join the club. I have to admit, I had hoped you two would get to know each other. You are half brothers, after all."

"It means nothing to him. And the more I know of him, the less I like him. Besides, you can't claim a family you've never known."

"I claim you," I said stubbornly. "You and Vix and everyone else. You're all Scarlet's family, and she's mine, so that makes you all mine, too."

His amusement came through in his voice. "You have a strange logic."

"I've been told. Here looks as good as anywhere."

We set up camp and waited for the others to find us. Rumble removed his helmet.

I smiled. "It's because I reminded you I own you, right?"

"I don't feel like a possession. At least not today. You gave him the sword, didn't you?"

I froze. "How did you know?"

"I suspected it might be _the_ sword. I'm not so surprised that you gave it to him. You are..." He looked away.

"I am what?"

"It's not my place."

"I'm asking you what you think!"

He looked at me seriously. "I think that you find it hard to see the wrong in that man. I've heard the stories."

"Sadler's stories."

"And others. Be careful."

"He's always been a friend to me," I said, "when others weren't."

"Do _you_ hate Drake?"

"Only sometimes. The more time I spend here, the more my anger dies away. I'm not sure why."

He didn't look convinced. To change the subject, I said, "Do you think the court even needs a queen? Why can't people vote on what happens? Why can't the advisers take care of everything?"

"You don't mean to return?"

"I have to return. I just mean... what do I know about running a kingdom that the rest of them don't? Nothing, that's what. It seems pointless even having me there when the advisers are the ones who figure out what's going on."

"I don't remember that happening. Perhaps, when we return, you'll see why you're needed."

"What does that mean?"

He shook his head. I meant to press him, but Drake and Brendan returned with four soldiers, plus Dymphna and Bran. I tried not to look concerned.

"Four?" I said. "Only four want to explore the world?"

"Five," Brendan said. "Bran's coming, too."

"You're taking Bran?" I said, aghast.

"It'll do him good. You mother him so."

"I do not mother him."

Bran looked from one of us to the other, his face flushing. "Can we not do this in front of everyone?"

I laughed at his obvious discomfort. "Sorry. Are we ready to get started then?"

"We might as well," Drake said. "We've a long journey ahead of us."

We moved on as a larger group, but I worried for the rest of the evening—about the court, about Brendan, about Scarlet, about all of us. The realm was dying, and even though we were trying, we still might not solve the problem in time.

It took us almost a week to get to Yvette's home. By then, the atmosphere between us had shifted into something less than pleasant.

As we approached Yvette's lands, Brendan held up his hand for everyone to stop. "Much has changed. This is nothing like I remember."

"Let's go and barter for a ship," Drake said impatiently. "I want to get this over and done with."

"Desperate to send me off?" Brendan asked sarcastically.

"There are worse things," Drake retorted.

"Don't you ever feel greedy?" Brendan asked, looking at Drake with a dangerous glare. "No matter what you have, you still want more."

"Okay!" I called out. "We're here. Let's do this before it gets dark. There are gates ahead, and we don't even know if we're welcome. Can we put whatever this is aside until later? _Please_."

Scowling, Brendan rode on in the lead. A huge wall rose up before us right in the middle of the forest. We rode to what looked to be the only gate. The sky grew dusky as we approached.

"Halt," a soldier on the wall said in a deep, commanding voice. "State your business."

As Brendan announced us, I peered through the gates. Brendan had described a craggy rock-edge of a place, but beyond the gates were lush fields. A road meandered toward what looked like a beautiful castle. And surrounding the castle were the shores of the realm. The sea brushed against the rocks as if in a caress, and the one longship in the bay barely moved against the current.

The soldiers opened the gates and welcomed us through. We made our way along the road, ready to meet Yvette's clan. I tried not to vomit.

# Chapter 19

On either side of us lay fields in the midst of exceptional growth. I smelled fruit.

"An orchard perhaps," Brendan said, noting my curiosity. "That wall stretched on out of sight. Who knows how much land is here?"

"And nobody knows where these people come from?"

"Offshoots of other families," he said, unconcerned. "Families spread and move on. It happens."

"I thought the fae didn't procreate enough for that."

"In the time I've been gone, a lot has happened." He pressed his lips together as if to say the conversation was over.

Well, whatever. If he wasn't going to be even the tiniest bit suspicious, I would do it for him. And it had nothing to do with any kind of jealousy.

We made it halfway down the road to the castle when Yvette came to greet us, accompanied by three of her women. She kept her focus on Brendan. Her eyes were sky blue—unnatural even for the fae—and her long lavender hair was in ringlets down her back. A riding cap was perched on her head at an angle, and as she rode sidesaddle on a silver-haired horse, the bracelets on her wrists chimed, sounding like an actual instrument.

"Greetings," she said pleasantly. "I wasn't expecting a visit. You've caught me unawares."

She didn't look as though she had been caught unawares. I frowned. I really needed to give her a chance. I couldn't afford to have another friend's partner hate me. A realisation hit me: I had rarely ever been liked by two halves of any couple, fae or human—even my own parents.

"You weren't exaggerating about the fruitfulness of this land," Brendan said. "It looks as though the blight never existed, and that's why we've come. We're told a stone may exist here that is keeping the land cleansed. We need to use that stone to heal the rift in the Fade. If you know its whereabouts, we would be most grateful to hear about it."

"A stone?" She smiled as if delighted. "I've never heard of a stone being here. You're welcome to search in the library, of course. I assume that's where a treasure would be kept."

I shifted in my seat. He'd mentioned a stone, not a treasure.

"I thank you," Brendan said. "Is there any one place here that's purer—noticeably purer—than the rest?"

"Only our lady," one of Yvette's women declared as the other giggled.

_Ugh_.

"Our land is equally clean," Yvette said softly, holding Brendan's gaze.

"We also need a ship," I blurted.

Yvette blinked. She looked at me then quickly back to Brendan. "Oh?"

"We're in search of a certain tree," he explained. "We've been informed it exists across the sea. I intend to search for it myself, but I need a ship."

"My ship." Somehow, Yvette had moved closer to Brendan without me noticing. She reached out and curled her fingers around his hand as he gripped the reins. "Only if I may accompany you."

"It's dangerous," Brendan said. "We have no way of knowing when I'll return or even if I'll return."

"I'd like to travel. That's my offer. Take it or leave it. You're all welcome to stay in my home while you search for the stone."

She turned abruptly and cantered back to the castle, closely followed by the other women.

"Well," Brendan said slowly, looking a little stunned. "We should follow her."

We headed down the road, barely keeping up with her retreat. I didn't want to watch Yvette wrap Brendan any more tightly around her little finger.

Yvette's castle was bigger and better than all the others, especially mine. I hadn't gotten a close look at Drake's home, but I had been told that Brendan's was the best in the land. Maybe a lot of fae hadn't seen Yvette's home.

Yvette asked her women to escort us all to our rooms, where we could rest and bathe. She personally led Brendan to his quarters in her wing of the castle.

Bran followed Rumble and me to our rooms.

"You get lost?" I asked.

"Brendan sent me. He doesn't need me here, he said." Bran looked desolate.

"Of course he doesn't need you. They want to marry him off to Yvette, not kill him." I tried to believe my own words.

The rooms were larger than mine had ever been, anywhere. I carried an unsettling feeling in my stomach. I couldn't pinpoint it; something just felt wrong.

The three of us ate together. I had a bath, and then a servant came to escort me to the library to begin my search. I couldn't keep track of the numerous turns and staircases. We moved from warmth straight into the bitter cold when we stepped from one hallway to the next.

"This is the old library," the servant finally said. "The rest of the castle was built around it."

Dymphna was waiting outside the door, her lips pressed together in a grim line.

"Rumble, Bran, wait with Dymphna," I said. "Watch out for anything weird."

"You're suspicious?" Dymphna asked, although she didn't sound surprised.

"Just..." I glanced over my shoulder as a prickle of apprehension ran down my back. "Let's be careful."

Inside the library, which turned out to be a multistoried maze, I found Drake.

"Where's Brendan?" I asked as he pored over an ancient-looking book on a massive table.

"With Yvette. It's just us."

The room was covered in shelves, and there were a number of staircases leading upwards. I stepped on one to look up, and I tried to count the levels. It seemed endless. Maybe I should have asked the others for help inside the library. At the rate I was going, we'd grow old and die in Yvette's library.

"Massive, isn't it?" Drake said. "I wasn't quite expecting this. Perhaps we should take a quick look now and find a way for the others to help without us getting in each other's way."

I shivered as a draught lifted my hair. The room was much colder than my quarters had been. I moved to the fireplace. The fire in the hearth was the same colour as Yvette's hair.

"I don't trust her," I whispered.

Drake closed the book with more vigour than necessary. "That's because she's taking Brendan's attention from you."

"No, it's because she's suspicious."

"Kings marry, Cara. That's how it works."

"Yeah, I've noticed." I dropped my gaze. "I'm sorry."

When I looked at him again, he was clutching the mantelpiece. I decided to try again.

"Don't you think it's a _little_ odd how this place used to be an unliveable ruin, and now it's the only blight-free part of the realm?"

His violet eyes darkened. "No, I don't think it's odd."

"How she suddenly turns up with money and power behind her, but nobody really knows who these people are?"

He let out a weary sigh.

"She called it a treasure," I said. "She knew what Brendan meant when he said we needed to find a stone."

"Many nobles are familiar with faery lore."

"She just makes my skin crawl."

He clutched at his chest. "You are _jealous_."

"I'm a freaking queen," I said lightly. "What do I have to be jealous of?"

"You want him," he persisted. "And this is driving you crazy."

"Or maybe I don't want it to end up like you and me!" I blurted. "I hate this. We were friends. More than friends. And now we can barely have a conversation together. Your wife hates me, and everyone's always watching to see what we'll do, and every time I look at my daughter's face, all I see is you!"

He moved toward me. "You know how sorry I am."

"Sorry isn't magic. It can't fix how I feel—how I'll always feel. I made friends here, and now I've lost them all. Zoe's in the human realm. So are my grandparents. I have to keep away to protect them. Grim and Realtín are part of a rival court. I only get to see them when something is wrong. Anya's going to marry Arlen, who's decided he hates my guts, and Líle was so depressed she wanted me to give her a suicide mission, for fuck's sake."

"What did she—"

"It doesn't _matter_! The point is that I can't talk to you or Brendan, and the people in my own home want a queen, not a friend. I can't even feel happy without feeling guilty. Bekind's the only one who never goes away, and she spends more time as a cat than anything else. And I can't see her now because she's with my daughter. And I miss everyone. I miss Scarlet"—my voice broke on her name—"and I miss the way everything used to be. I'm so... so _lonely_."

He reached out for my hand. "We're all lonely. Brendan is. _I_ am. The crown is a curse. I tried to protect you from it, but you misunderstood me. You thought I wanted the power."

"You acted as though you wanted the power."

"It's all an act. Haven't you learned yet? I have to hurt people and be cruel and distant. I have to stay away from people I care about because I need to be in control, and one small off-balance step could destroy my entire court. You feel like I've hurt you, and I'm truly sorry for every moment of pain I've caused you, but it's nothing compared to what the alternative could have been."

I slipped into a seat. He joined me at the table—the old Drake, for a change.

"I don't know what I'm doing," I admitted. "They wanted me for the wrong reasons. They think I can force you and Brendan to follow my lead, but I can't, and I don't even want to. They think I'll be pliable, that I'll sway when they ask for things. They bitch and moan, and I don't know who I can trust. The people who used to be on my side look at me the way they looked at Sadler. It's like... I think I'm doing my best, that I'm making good decisions, and then it backfires, and I'm the one to blame. I can't win."

"There are no winners. It's not as easy as Brendan makes it look."

I laughed, wiping away a stray tear. "They do seem to respect him most of the time."

"You earned a kingdom. They must respect you for that."

I blew out a shaky breath. "Do you remember when we asked Sadler's people to change sides?"

He nodded.

"The first one was a servant. She was probably the shortest, most terrified person there, and she was the first to walk over to my side."

"I remember her."

"When I was trapped with Sadler, she used to bring me food. She was so nervous of me, but she was sweet. I thought I could give her a better life this time. She slept in my room and took care of Scarlet and the other children. She made me call her Rat because she didn't have a real name. I still don't know why she was called Rat."

"Was?" he said softly.

I licked my lips, but they tasted like shame. "I told the court they were free men and women and said that Deorad's children were no longer nameless. I thought I was doing something good, but one of those free men decided to rape Rat when nobody else was around. She fought back because I'd told her she wasn't worthless, and he killed her. He killed her for no reason other than she stopped him from getting what he wanted. He thought he was entitled to her body because _he_ was free."

"What did you do?"

I traced lines in the table, slowing down the admittance of guilt, as if that would change what had happened. "I cleaned her body myself. I cried. I made them all feel sorrow, and I made them sorry. And all the while, that man was outside, tied to stakes meant for the garden. I made him wait—made everyone wait—and then I marched out there and cut him open with a knife. My dagger. I held his gaze as I twisted the knife, but I didn't finish him off. I walked away and let him die slowly out there. And nobody tried to stop me. Nobody said a word about it." I looked at him. In for a penny... "And I didn't care. I was happy he died. It didn't feel right to let him walk around after what he did."

"How do you feel about it now?"

"I don't know. I think... I'm still glad he's dead and that I was the one to do it. I'm glad nobody stopped me. I was in control, I was in charge, and that felt better than I'd expected. And a part of me felt relieved. I didn't feel relief when Deorad died. He was too pathetic. I couldn't equate what he had done with the body lying on that bed. It was just his shell I'd destroyed. The real Deorad was long gone. Did you know I was the one who killed Reynard?"

He looked taken aback as he shook his head in answer.

"Well, I did. I chickened out, and he attacked me, and when I finally got the better of him, it felt right, as if I had made the world safer. And then I pretty much forgot he'd ever existed. With Sadler, I was too scared to feel anything. I panicked, and I couldn't let him live. I couldn't risk being trapped with him again—or worse, Scarlet being under his influence." My fingers trembled.

"I should have realised my mistake." He laid his hand on mine. "I should have warned you. I wanted information. I didn't truly want him to live. I made a lot of mistakes that day. If I had but spoken to you..."

But I still didn't think I could have let him take the Dark Court.

"Three enemies—three people I had good reason to hate—died by my hands without me feeling much of anything," I said softly. "Then this one faery, whose real name I didn't even know, died, and it felt like my world was suddenly complete. I was relieved and frightened by my own hate and a million other emotions I can't even begin to describe."

"Delayed reaction," he said.

"It looks like you were right about me. I _have_ changed. I _have_ lost the things that made me human."

"I wasn't right. Perhaps, in some part of your mind, you were killing men like Deorad and Sadler again and maybe even your own father."

"Biological or other?" I asked wryly.

"Both?" He squeezed my hand. "I know how much guilt you feel about your mother. How her life changed because of your birth—and even your conception. That man raped her, and you grew up to change the lives of all of them—your brother, your mother, and the man you knew as your father. Perhaps you were killing all of those memories when you took the life of Rat's murderer."

"Killing people isn't really a legitimate form of therapy, you know."

"We're in a dying realm that was cut away from the world that gave it life. You've had a lot of adjusting to do and a lot of guilt you needed to let go of."

"I just earned myself new guilt," I said. "How can that ever be good?"

"New guilt hasn't had years to chew you up."

The door opened, and he pulled his hand away and smoothed his expression.

"You really need to teach me the straight-face thing," I said under my breath.

The corner of his lip twitched. Bran stood at the door. "They've sent word that dinner is ready. We're to join Yvette and Brendan for the meal."

I exchanged a look with Drake before nodding, and we stood. "Thanks," I said before we left. "It was good to... talk."

He smiled, a glimpse of the real Drake shining through. "I had missed it."

I desperately wanted to tell him what I had seen in the mirror about Sorcha, but I just couldn't.

As we were led down winding corridors to have dinner, Rumble touched my arm. "I'll taste everything before you eat it."

"That's kind of rude."

"Better to be rude than dead."

"And who's to protect me when you're dead?"

He nodded at Bran. "The boy. The daoine sídhe wouldn't like to see a motherless child either."

I smiled. "It would be really stupid to poison me here in front of the kings."

"Or very clever, if you planned on getting rid of one of those kings, too."

"Brendan would be pissed," I said. "He wouldn't stand for that."

"He may not have a choice," Rumble murmured. "There are more soldiers in this castle than the Darkside. Imagine what's outside, patrolling the rest of their land. This is a place of great power and magic. Can't you feel it?"

I nodded. The library had cleared my head. The atmosphere had felt normal in there. Walking through the rest of the castle felt like a dream. I entered the dining room to see Yvette leaning over Brendan's shoulder and decided maybe "nightmare" was a better word for it.

Yvette looked surprised to see us. "I had almost forgotten we weren't alone."

"Find anything?" Brendan asked me.

My cheeks burned. "Uh, not yet."

He gave me an odd look. The dinner began. We, the guests, were the only ones at the table apart from Yvette and her women.

"Where are the rest of your family?" I asked as Rumble began the job of tasting everything in my cup and plate. Brendan watched him with a great deal of curiosity. My cheeks burned hotter.

Yvette tore her gaze away from Brendan long enough to wave her hand at me. "Oh, travelling."

"Will you wait for their return before you let Brendan take the ship?" Drake asked.

She frowned a little then gave him her attention. "I'll be taking the ship as soon as Brendan is ready to leave."

"I need to know we've found the stone first," he said.

"The library is huge," she said dismissively. "It'll take them an age to find anything in there."

I stiffened. Was that what she wanted? Maybe Drake was right. Maybe I was being too hard on her because of my own issues.

She smiled at me then, but it was a sly smile, the kind that hid something vile. "I trust the library was... comfortable enough for the both of you." Her tone was full of silent accusation, as though she thought she knew something about us.

"What?" I asked sharply.

She widened her eyes innocently. "The chairs. They are comfortable, aren't they? If not, I can send alternatives for you."

"They're fine," I managed to eke out through my clenched teeth. I wasn't being too hard on her. She was trouble. "Thank you, Rumble," I said loudly, drawing attention to the fact we didn't trust Yvette.

Brendan studied me with a condemnatory look. He was already turning against me. Sighing, I picked at my food. Finally, I rose to my feet. "I'm going back to the library. The sooner we find that stone, the better."

"She's so right," Yvette was saying as I left. "But finish your meal. I still have to give you that tour, remember?"

With clenched fists, I left the room with Rumble and Bran, having the awful feeling I was leaving Brendan in the den of a she-devil. But he was a grown-up, just like the rest of us. It wasn't my business. I just had to keep reminding myself of that.

# Chapter 20

The next two days were spent exploring the library. Brendan was still occupied by Yvette's company, but since the bookcases stretched over numerous floors, the rest of us, including Brendan's team of soldiers, searched their length and breadth. The place was full of artefacts and books, and all of them existed in a castle Brendan hadn't even known existed until recently.

"How come they get to keep all of the cool stuff?" I asked as I poked at the glass case housing an eyeball that was larger than my head.

"Because they preserved it, probably." Dymphna stuck her head around a stack of books to look at me. "The queens were never interested in this, as far as I'm aware."

"Was Yvette friends with the queens then?" I wondered aloud.

"Gossiping again?" Brendan asked, startling me.

I looked at him, concerned by his red-rimmed eyes. The vitality was gone, and he looked weary.

"You look exhausted," I said. "Why do you look exhausted?"

"Because I haven't been sleeping." He frowned. "Why are you looking at me that way?"

I shrugged.

"And why have none of you come to dinner?"

"We're not invited," I said.

"Food simply appears here," Dymphna added.

"Besides," I said a little bitchily, "some of us don't have time for dinner dates."

Dymphna made a sound of agreement.

"Well, if the women are angry, I must be in the wrong," Brendan said, giving me his most charming smile.

I made a face and walked away, but he followed. "Haven't you found anything yet?"

"Haven't you seen the size of this place?" I gestured toward the staircase and upward. "We haven't seen Bran since yesterday. He's probably wandering around the book stacks, crying for help."

Brendan's eyebrows furrowed.

"She's joking," Dymphna called out. "She does that often."

Brendan's lips twitched. "I noticed."

"I don't think the stone is even here," I said, wiping sweat off my brow then realising I had just smeared my dusty hands all over my face. "Can't you sense how different this library feels from everywhere else here, Brendan?"

He sighed. "It does seem rather... uninspiring."

"We're supposed to be drawn to the stone. I'm not drawn to this place at all. In fact, I can't wait until we get back to the blight."

Brendan grinned. "How long have you been in this room, Cara? You sound quite demented. Besides, I won't be getting back to the blight. As soon as we find the stone, I'm getting on a ship, remember?"

My heart sank. I had almost forgotten.

"And if we don't find it?" Dymphna asked.

Brendan sighed. "I don't know." Then he entered into the search and got stuck in it along with the rest of us.

I opened countless boxes and bags and display units, but none of them held a stone of any kind, never mind the stone of destiny. Entire bookcases were empty as though the place had been cleared out long ago, but plenty of books and artefacts remained, and I spent way too much time flipping through old books with missing pages.

I found a glass case that contained a massive book that looked as though it were bound in skin. Intrigued for no other reason than extreme boredom, I lifted the glass lid and took a peek.

Archaic writing at the front of the book informed me that it was divided into sections, one of which was named, "The time the seas ran black."

I flicked to the last section only to find the pages had been torn out. I started to turn away but then saw that a small scrap remained. I read the words and shivered.

* * *

_... Chaos. And all that remained was his reflection trapped in a golden mirror. Without a vessel, they could only send him to sleep, but She..._

* * *

My heart raced in my chest. I tore out that scrap and shoved it into my pocket. Did it mean _my_ mirror? And Líle had mentioned a vessel. But how could I ask her for more information without sending her back into the same dark state she had entered before? There had to be a way. It was becoming clear to me that the information we needed had been deliberately removed. But how could I blame Yvette with no proof? Brendan and Drake already thought I was being bitchy and jealous. And they might be right. Anyone could have torn pages out of an ancient book.

I wandered off, thinking hard, and came upon a narrow staircase I hadn't spotted before which hadn't been marked as searched. Sighing, I headed up, wishing I could fast-forward through time. The stairs led to a tiny room that only had enough space for one bookshelf on either side. Between those hung a floor-length painting covered with black cloth. Unable to stop myself, I pulled the cloth aside.

The painting was of a tall, muscular woman with red hair. She was a giantess with strong features and lifelike green eyes that saw into my soul.

"Wow," I whispered.

"Do you know who it is?" Brendan's voice came from behind me, making me jump.

I shook my head. "She's... I don't have the words for it."

"That's Brighid."

I made to turn around, but he held me in place, leaning his chin on top of my head. Brighid, the goddess. She looked strange and familiar all at once.

"I can't stop looking at her," I admitted.

"Nobody can," he said.

"Is that why they had the picture covered up?"

He laughed and held me tighter. "No. They just can't remove the picture from the wall. Only a follower of Brighid would let this go uncovered."

"I wouldn't cover it up."

"You're halfway converted," he teased. "You're Brighid's daughter, as far as some are concerned."

"It's not right that you banned a religion." I frowned. "Do you still do that?"

"I can't get away with it with you around. Everyone would just leave my court for yours, and I won't give you the satisfaction of taking them in."

I elbowed him in the gut. "You're so annoying sometimes."

He wrapped his arms around me to stop any further violence. "Oh, I wish you knew how annoying you were, Cara Kelly."

I relaxed against him. "Why was Sadler trying to collect the legendary treasures?"

"To give himself or his god more power," Brendan suggested. "Or perhaps to destroy another god. We'll never know."

"He's still controlling us," I said bitterly. "He's dead, and we're still twenty steps behind, trying to figure him out."

"We have a plan. I'll get the tree. You and Drake will find the stone. We'll seal the rift, and we'll plant the tree, and if we're lucky, we can do it all before the realm is destroyed."

"If we find the stone, we'll have three of the legendary treasures. That'll leave just one more. We could deal with Sadler's god for good."

"You're ambitious." He pressed me against the bookcase to face me. His bulky presence made the room seem like a wardrobe. "It's not so easy to find all of the treasures. If it was, Sadler would have accomplished it already. And a god could destroy us before we ever even—"

"Unless he's not free," I whispered urgently. "Grim told me there were old stories about the legendary treasures."

"He had our scribes searching for information, and Yvette has agreed to let them come here to further their research," Brendan said. "What of it?"

"I've been looking. There are references to it here, but I found nothing about the stories themselves because the pages are missing. It's as if history's been wiped clean."

"What are you saying?"

I gripped his shirt. "I'm saying be careful on that boat in case we're being purposely delayed."

"Yvette is helping us, Cara."

"She's holding an ultimatum over your head!"

"That's her family," he said. "Not her."

"Oh, yeah, her mysterious large and fertile family who are nowhere to be found. Don't you find any of this suspicious?"

"I'm finding you a little bit paranoid, to be truthful."

"And you keep going on about me trusting you?" I scoffed.

His bemused expression turned irritated. "Don't throw this back at me. You're the one who stole a third of my realm from right under my nose."

"Are you serious?" I pushed him away. "I've already explained that to you."

"You also told me you'd wish me luck if marrying Yvette made me happy. Now you're sabotaging it by trying to make me doubt her."

"I just want you to be safe. Is that so bloody terrible?"

"Maybe it is," he said under his breath, "if you can't make up your mind what you want from me."

"I know what I want from you," I snapped. "And I know we should be concentrating on fixing the mess we made, but if you're going to be so unreasonable then... why the hell are you laughing at me?"

He really was laughing. He choked it down, but he couldn't hide it. "Oh, nothing. I just realised something," he said, still laughing. "Never mind. Now let's get out from Brighid's gaze."

When lunch came, the servant seemed surprised to see Brendan. He hit the gong to alert even those on the uppermost floors of the library that food had arrived. Then he left us alone, but I wasn't too surprised when a couple of hours later, all of us got the summons to join Yvette for dinner.

Dusty and sweaty, we found our way to the dining room with Brendan's help. I couldn't get used to the maze of hallways—not that I particularly wanted to.

Yvette wrinkled her nose at our appearance. "Looks like you worked up a sweat," she said to me in her nasty-sweet tone.

I bit back a smart remark and nodded, taking a seat across from Drake.

"Oh," Yvette exclaimed as if she had just discovered something momentous. "Am I keeping you both?"

I gave her a puzzled look.

She lowered her voice conspiratorially. "Oh, we all know about you two. Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me."

"What secret would that be?" Everyone turned to look at me. I avoided their eyes, even when somebody murmured my name as if in warning.

"When the cat's away," she said softly. "I don't judge. Of course, I'll be more... loyal when I'm married."

My nails raked the table. "If you have something to say, spit it out."

Her smile turned deadly. "Well, you bore a child for him while married to another, and you killed your husband. You obviously have unfinished business together."

Drake slammed his glass on the table.

"Have some fucking respect," I spat, getting to my feet.

"Cara," Brendan said, but I couldn't look at him.

"I'm going. This is pointless."

"Where?" Yvette enquired as if she cared.

"To look for the stone."

"We'll all go back to the library in the morning," Brendan said.

"No," I said. "I mean I'm looking elsewhere. The stone isn't here, and I'm not going to listen to _this_ for a moment longer."

"She's right," Drake said. "It's time to move on."

"The ship," Yvette said in a different kind of voice. "I'm taking it. Brendan, you're welcome to come with me."

"But the stone," he said.

"They can find the stone. They make a good pair, do they not?"

Brendan gave me a questioning look and waited for me to make my decision.

"We all have to do what's best for the realm," I said. "Thank you for the... hospitality, Yvette. I'll be sure to return the favour someday."

"Perhaps when I travel the realm on my honeymoon," she said, smirking.

I forced myself to smile. And then I had to leave the room before I punched Brendan's future queen right in the nose.

I was ready to set out early the next morning. We didn't have much to take with us. Rumble was as eager to leave as I was, but Bran seemed torn.

"He's your king," I said softly when he took a pack of supplies outside to load up on Dubh. "You volunteered to go with him."

He bit his lip. "It's different now. Everything's changing."

"We all have to make sacrifices. The blight can't last forever. We have to do things now to stop it."

He nodded and kissed my cheek then left. When I heard footsteps a few seconds later, I thought he had returned.

"Stop worrying, Bran," I said without looking. "Brendan will make sure you all come home safely."

"Thank you for the vote of confidence."

I whirled around to face Brendan. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to say goodbye, of course. Or am I in the bad books again?"

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'll try not to hate your wife in future, I swear."

He smiled. "For a moment, I thought... never mind."

"When are you leaving?"

"In a couple of days. Yvette is surprisingly eager to set sail now that you all are leaving."

I twisted the bracelet around my wrist. "You'll be careful though, right? The sword might look cool, but it won't make you invincible. No running into fights you could just as easily avoid."

"I'll try to remember that."

My stomach twisted. I inhaled sharply, feeling a sudden lump in my throat. "Maybe we should all go."

"If something happens, we'll need leaders safe at home," he said.

"Nothing will happen," I said, suddenly anxious.

For an instant, fear crossed his face.

I threw my arms around him. "I have to go."

He held on to me. "We'll meet again. All of us." He made a sound of dismay. "Are you crying? Why are you crying?"

"Usually, we don't get to say goodbye. I don't like goodbyes."

"Neither do I. So let's not say it."

I laughed through my tears and looked up at him. When he was around, I felt as if at least one of us knew what to do. Even when Brendan didn't, he acted as though he did. And now he was going away on a trip that very few fae would ever dare to do, with an awful bitch whom he would probably come home married to.

"You're really crying," he said in amazement. "Look at those tears."

I hiccupped. "Shut up."

He brushed my fringe away from my face with a smile. Before I could chicken out, I reached up on my tiptoes, drew him closer, and kissed him. He responded softly before pulling away and saying my name.

"It's okay. I know." I turned, grabbed my bag, and walked to the door. I hesitated in the doorway. "Don't get hurt."

And when I left, he didn't follow. But at least I had let him know I cared. It might not be good enough, but at least he would know if we never met again.

As soon as we left through the gate, I sighed with relief. We hadn't been welcome inside, and it was good to be out of there.

"Where are we going?" Dymphna asked.

"We can split up," I said. "We wasted too much time already. Drake, where were you thinking of going?"

He shrugged. "There are other clean spots on that map. Maybe the stone isn't as powerful as we thought, and one of the smaller patches is hiding it."

"I'm going to the human realm," I said, ignoring his surprised look. "I'm going to the Lia Fáil."

"The Watcher said it's a fake."

"Exactly. The best place to hide something is in the first place people brush off as being impossible. So what if the monument itself is fake? That doesn't mean the real thing isn't hidden there, too."

"You said yourself that the human realm is tainted," Dymphna said. "What makes you think the stone is there at all?"

"I just feel like I should go back. Besides, the taint hasn't affected the land the way it has here. Maybe that's because the stone is actually there."

"And you want to see your daughter," she said with a smile.

"Don't you?"

She nodded. "I would like to go to the human realm. Of course."

"We'll all go," Drake said. "If we don't find anything, we could try an old scribe who Donella claims has spent so many years writing down stories that he may have an answer to this question somewhere."

"Where is he?" I asked.

"In southern neutral territory. It won't take us long to find him."

"Should we go there first?"

"Your instincts have always been good. I'd like to see this monument, too," he said. "Dymphna, any idea where the nearest portal is?"

She took out a map she carried everywhere. It was pinpointed with the exact locations of portals and territory lines. "It's closer than neutral territory." Dymphna winced. "But it might be dangerous."

"How dangerous?" I asked.

"We'll almost certainly have a fight on our hands." She made another face. "We'll need to cross the blackthorns."

"Is it the only way?"

"If we want to save time. The second choice is safer but will take much longer. We'll end up walking in circles if the bogmen have anything to do with it."

"Unless we plan on sacrificing one of our group." Drake looked at me. "Are you willing?"

"Wait," I said. "What are the blackthorns?"

"A... less than welcoming place."

"Is it worth it?"

He smiled. "If you want to see your daughter tomorrow."

That did it. "Then let's go."

# Chapter 21

Reaching the blackthorns was like stepping into another world. We walked off a patch of lush grass onto uneven, desiccated earth that burned under heat that appeared to come out of nowhere. Cracks had formed in the dirt. In all directions lay little mounds that opened up as though something had exploded. When Dymphna's horse stumbled, almost throwing the daoine sídhe, we got off and led the horses on foot.

"We're going to have to leave them here," Rumble said.

"I know," I whispered, not sure why it felt so wrong to raise my voice.

"Look at this place." Drake blocked his eyes from the sun to look around. "I was here once. It wasn't like this. It's as if every bit of moisture has been drained for miles."

"The sooner we leave here, the better," Dymphna said uneasily. "It feels like there are eyes on my back."

The back of my neck had been tingling since we'd stepped onto the cracked earth. I knew the feeling well.

Rumble's foot sank into the ground, sending dust upward. He wasn't hurt, but his misstep pointed to how difficult the terrain was. "We need to go back," I said. "The horses will die out here if we abandon them."

"We can rest ourselves, too," Drake said. "It's going to be a long walk."

"When we return, the horses will be long gone," Dymphna said.

"Someone will find them," Drake said. "They're good horses."

We moved back to the grassland we had left behind and took our loads off the horses.

"I have to leave you," I whispered to Dubh as I rubbed him down. "Stay safe."

He nibbled my hair, and I wondered how long he would wait for us. He was smarter than the other horses. He would survive even if they did not. I felt guilty, nonetheless, and I was glad Brendan's beautiful golden horse wasn't with us still.

When we sat down to camp, nobody was hungry. We picked at our food in silence.

"Can a single boat make it across the water?" I asked as the horses grazed.

"It will have to," Drake said.

"It's a sturdy-looking boat," Dymphna said reassuringly. "There's no reason they can't make it there and back unharmed."

"The lady Yvette seemed confident about the boat," Rumble said, giving me a meaningful look. "As though she had used it before."

"She hardly travelled across the sea," Drake said.

"Then why does she have a sailing boat?" Rumble asked.

"Dymphna, your people came from abroad originally. How far is the journey?" I asked.

She shrugged. "Nobody remembers. Perhaps nobody alive knows."

"Some of the Darksiders think that Sadler went across the sea."

"To do what?" Drake asked.

Rumble answered for me. "Sadler lived in the human realm and aged because he was addicted to human suffering. He forgot to go home. Somebody brought him back from there and cleaned him up, but he was never the same. He disappeared again, and when he returned, he was joined by the doctor and some others, and his heart was full of darkness. His veins were black, and the land began to turn black, too, more quickly than before."

"But the blackness came from the rift," Drake said. "Are you saying it came from Sadler first?"

"No," Rumble said. "Some say Sadler was baptised in the darkness and that he's the one who started the spread. But the Darkside began before Sadler's descent into madness. Perhaps he gave the darkness life and strength. He sent others to gather up Deorad and his children. Deorad was only too keen to help his father. Sadler was favoured by the queens, both of them, and they didn't notice when he made his home in the Darkside. Nobody knows the truth for sure, but some say he didn't come home alone but brought a demon with him. All I know is that he died a different man than he was when I first arrived."

"Do you believe in that story?" Drake was frowning, trying to digest it all.

"About a demon? No." Rumble removed his helmet and glanced at me. "But I believe he may have been under the influence of a powerful geis, enacted by a god. Perhaps Sadler asked for his grief to be destroyed or his guilt to be removed."

"What grief?" Dymphna asked.

"He grieved for the man he was and the woman his first wife had been. He grieved for the life that was, and the life that could have been. Some of the older members of court claim he even grieved for his old friend, Brendan."

Despite my hatred of Sadler, I thought that was pitiful. "The doctor goaded him and encouraged him, maybe even had a kind of power over him. There was one time, in his room, when Sadler seemed high on my fear. He said something about finding women that looked like his first wife but that it was I who reminded him of her. And he seemed so sad about that. There were moments when he acted like he had just remembered how he used to be, how he was supposed to be, but they never lasted long."

"Mostly, he was angry and spiteful, ready to punish the world. But you're right." Rumble looked at me. "At times, I saw the shadow of a decent man in there. But that man was slowly being destroyed by something far more dangerous and powerful."

"And yet you were loyal to him." Drake sounded disgusted.

"If it wasn't for Rumble, I'd be dead," I said sharply. Drake didn't even look at me. He was too busy studying Rumble's face.

"He was all I had," Rumble said. "I had nowhere else to go. And I wanted to live. I knew the time would come when I could perhaps help him. His worst enemy was his own reflection in the mirror."

"What do _you_ believe is the truth about this god?" Dymphna asked.

"The god of death draws power from the dead." Rumble's voice had strangely softened. "The goddess of fertility draws power whenever a child is born. The god of the sea draws power from the waves themselves. And the god of chaos draws power from mayhem. There's never much more in the way of mayhem than a mad king who helps destroy the realm. That's the ultimate power for a god of chaos to siphon."

"How do we beat a god?" Drake muttered.

"With four legendary treasures." And I had just sent one across the sea. "Wait. Rumble, you said Sadler was accompanied by others when he returned. Who?"

"The doctor," he said. "The hunchback. The glaistig, if the rumours are to be believed. There were five, but I wasn't there. I never saw the others, and I'm not sure they were ever part of the court. They could have been killed, or they could have left."

"Wait, two more people from across the sea could be roaming freely?"

Rumble gave me a steady look. "And another is your adviser."

And the glaistig had vanished on the night I had acted as though my drink had been spiked. That shed some light on my conversation with Bart. I gazed at the fire. I had already known that Bart was from afar, but who did that leave, and were any of them loyal to this chaotic god?

"The doctor was the one with the power," I said. "He was the one in Sadler's ear, encouraging him. He was the one who hurt me."

"True," Rumble said. "But the ones from across the sea are capable of lies."

I shivered. "Did the mirror come from across the sea?"

"I don't know," Rumble said. "It simply appeared. And it disappears at will."

And for a sudden moment, I couldn't wait to get home and look at my reflection again. I thought of the scrap of paper in my pocket. Had the image staring back at me ever been _my_ reflection?

The cracked earth was uneven and hard to walk on without tripping or catching a foot in the gaps. The heat was sweltering, even though it was night.

"We haven't seen anyone in a long time," I said, just to fill the oppressive silence.

"It's no wonder. This place is dead," Dymphna said.

It was dark, and the moon was clouded, which made the way even harder to move through. After two hours, we reached the first blackthorn tree.

"Are they supposed to look like this?" I wondered aloud.

"Definitely not," Drake said firmly.

The tree resembled upright firewood. The branches were spiky and parched. The wasteland continued into the blackthorn woods. The earth was less dry than in the area we had just passed through, as though all moisture were drained to this spot in order to keep the trees alive. But the trees were barely living. The first trees we passed were parched and white as bone. Some misshapen sticks lay beneath them, one twisted into the shape of a clutching hand. Shivering, I moved on, eager to reach the portal and get back to the human realm.

I took a sip of water, and the closest trees seemed to bend toward me as if gasping for a taste. With a fright, I dropped my water, and it spilled along the ground. The moisture was instantly drawn beneath the earth as if a mouth were directly under the surface, sucking it down.

There was a strange sound, as if a dozen twigs were cracking at the same time, and six figures leapt out in front of us, barring our way. Startled, I stepped back, right into Rumble. He gently lifted me out of his way and positioned himself so as to guard me.

The creatures looked as though they were made of wood. Their feet were blackened and rotting, and their arms were dry, cracked twigs. One tried to run at us and broke, falling in twisted pieces. It sank its wooden arms into the ground to haul itself closer.

The clouds passed, and the beam of a full lilac moon sent a sheet of glimmering light over us.

"The lunantisídhe," Drake whispered. "They don't remember me."

The earth we stood on was full of the blight. Dried black stains marred many of the wide cracks. The lunantisídhe came closer, aggressive in their dying state.

"Hold," a woman's voice said. "She gave the forest a gift. We don't harm the generous, not even now—not even if they didn't intend the gift."

Beyond the spiky stick men, in the shadows of the trees, a woman's shape slowly formed before my eyes. Her tangled white hair reached her feet, and the curvature of her spine made her look tiny. She gripped a walking stick, and a massive albino raven sat on her shoulders.

"A witch," Dymphna muttered under her breath.

"A witch, am I?" the old woman called out. "So some say. Others call me a guardian. But few call me anything anymore. My blackthorns are forgotten, and so the realm dies."

Drake held out his water with a steady hand. He let it spill to the earth. The lunantisídhe moved out of our way. Dymphna followed suit, but Rumble stepped past them and offered the water to the woman.

She took it, a strange smile on her lips. "Come, children. We have guests." She beckoned us forward.

The others hesitated, but I was dying to know more, so I took the lead.

"We're looking for a portal," Drake said when we reached the old woman.

"And I'm looking for answers," the woman said smartly. "My needs shall lead to your desires."

She led us deeper into the forest. "You have horses."

"We left them on the plains," Drake said.

She reached up and touched the raven. "Make them stay. We'll take care of them." The raven flew up into the air and was soon out of sight.

We reached a little hut. The land was as black there as anywhere I had seen. The woman settled into a little chair and beckoned for us to sit at her feet. Rumble and I did so willingly. Drake and Dymphna hesitated.

The woman looked at me. "You're the one who will answer me. And tell me no lies. I'll smell them."

"She's a queen," Drake said in a haughty tone. "You won't direct her."

"She's a human first," the old woman said, locking gazes with me. "And I know her face. I saw it in the moon. I saw it in the leaves when we had some. I see her face in my death. And in the blackthorn's reawakening." She stretched out her arms. "We sit under the branches of the first blackthorn tree. If it dies, so do all the others. When trees die in the faery realm, the end of days approaches."

"Nonsense," Drake said, but he didn't sound sure.

"What do you want to know?" I asked.

"Are you going to end the blight?"

In her eyes, I saw a world stretched out beyond. I blinked rapidly, and I only saw her beady black eyes again. "I'm trying to. We're looking for the Lia Fáil, the stone of destiny. It could close the rift. Our friend is looking for the First Tree, the one that can cleanse the earth."

She tutted. "Treating the symptoms not the cause. The First Tree won't grow here. Do you know, I saw Sadler once."

"In the leaves or the moon?" Drake asked scathingly.

"Face-to-face." She turned her head and looked at him. "I saw you, too, when you were a lost little boy. You still haven't found what you were looking for, and now it's out of your reach."

"My father is dead. It may not have been by my hand, but I found what I was looking for."

"Symptoms," she said with a snort. "Some things never change." She turned to me again. "Sadler came here to destroy me because he knew my tongue could give him away. He cut off the water, poisoned the earth, and made sure nobody wanted to venture here again. Then he locked himself away in his little castle and played with his toys."

"I'm sorry," I said, unsure of what else to say.

"I don't want sorry," the old woman said. "I want a promise. Treat the cause, Cara Kelly. One way or another, treat the cause."

"I don't know what that means."

"Then may the goddess help us all." She stood abruptly. "I may be dead by the time you return. Until that day, I'll take care of the horses as if they were part of my forest."

"Why don't you leave?" I asked. "Go somewhere less tainted?"

"This is where I belong. I could survive outside of here, but the woods would die as soon as I left. We're as one while I'm here." She drank deeply from Rumble's water. "And I thank you for the extra few days." She pointed a hand. "The portal is an hour in that direction. Everything out there is dead, so you'll come to no harm."

My companions stood and followed her direction, but she grabbed my shoulder before I could move. Her black eyes turned white, and her grip felt as if it would bruise my skin. "Hard choices," she murmured. "Always choices. That's your punishment, a punishment you're not even old enough to have learned. You'll have to choose between friends, between enemies, and between outcomes. And you can't avoid the paying a price for your choices. Our fate lies in the hands of humans, as it always has. But beware the voices. They will mislead you. The words will spit from the mouths of those you trust and those you don't, and the words you listen to will be the ones that change our fate. We are dying, and the voice we need is silent. The gods have already played their hands, and now we wait. We wait for—" Her head shot back, and her eyes turned black again. When she looked at me, she said, "Well, what are you waiting for? The portal's that way."

Unsettled, I ran after the others. The old woman didn't even seem to realise that something had happened. Neither did anyone else. It was as though only my eyes had seen it. The stick men crept after us, but none of them came close enough to harm us with those pointed wooden fingers.

Still, we hurried after that and made it to the portal in record time. It blurred at the edge of a cliff with a dangerous drop. If it didn't work, we were all doomed.

"Any idea where we'll come out?" I asked.

"We'll find the stone first." Drake gave me a look I didn't recognise. "And then you'll get to see your friends again."

Dymphna passed through soundlessly. One second she was there, and the next, she was gone. When the wind blew, I thought I saw a glimpse of her form through the portal, but it might have been my imagination.

I could barely see the portal, so I gripped Rumble's sleeve and closed my eyes, letting him lead me through. A rush of air lifted my hair, and a shiver ran down my spine as I half expected to drop off the cliff, but then we were through. Dawn was slowly approaching, and we were in a field, surrounded by flowers I didn't recognise.

"This way," Dymphna said excitedly. "We need to go this way."

I pulled my hood up over my hair and hoped we would make it before the sun finished rising.

# Chapter 22

We set foot on the hill of Tara when the sky was dashed with red-and-pink light. And as soon as we stood on the grass, I knew that the stone of destiny _had_ to be here. Something in the breeze vibrated. Drake's eyes were bright and eager, and I knew he felt it, too.

"It's not just me, right?" I sensed the same pull that the so-called spear and the sword held over me. "It's here, and it wants to be found."

"We're on the right path," Drake said, his eyes closing in a moment of relief.

I knew how he felt. Wondering if I was doing the right thing had become a solid part of my daily routine.

We proceeded, and I drew in a breath to steady myself, knowing that ancient beings had stepped on the same piece of earth as we were walking on. A part of history surrounded us. I wondered if there had been a time when Tara existed in the realm of the fae.

The Lia Fáil was also known as the inauguration mound, a place where kings, perhaps human _and_ fae, had stood for their crowning. It resembled a massive sundial. When we stood around it, nobody said a word for a moment.

"Do you think this could be it?" Dymphna asked as the wind picked up, sending my hair across my face.

I reached out, intending to touch it, then dropped my hand in dismay. It was awe inspiring, but I felt no magic. I walked around in a circle, and the back of my neck prickled. "It's somewhere here. I just know it is."

Drake and I stepped forward as one, coming to a stop on the slabs circling the monument.

"No singing," he said lightly, but I caught a flash of disappointment in his expression. "It used to sing for true kings."

"Neither of us belong here," I whispered.

He reached out and brushed his fingers against mine then stepped to the other side of the stone, looking around for some sign of a hiding place.

"It's here." Kneeling, I slid my fingers across the slabs. They were cold and lifeless, as expected. Drake did the same on his side, and we continued until we met up. My hand touched the final slab, and I jumped away, shocked.

"What is it?" Drake touched the slab, but he withstood any shocks he might have been experiencing. He pushed hard, and as if set on a spring, the slab slid neatly upward.

And under the slab was a plain, moss-coloured stone. Drake lifted it out and hefted it in his hand. He glanced at me and shrugged. It looked so... ordinary.

But I understood what Brendan meant about the sword. My first view of the stone had been disappointing, but as soon as Drake held it in his hands, an ache had formed in my chest. I wanted it. I _needed_ it.

I reached out, and even as I was moving, I felt the stone calling me to it. Drake opened his palm flat to let me touch it. When I did, it changed shape. The stone flattened and stretched, even changed colour, until it looked like an ancient tablet. Engravings spread across the surface as we watched. At first, they were hard to make out. But then I realised flashes of images were morphing into something different before we could even register the original shapes. I thought I saw a green sword and maybe an underwater cave, but it was hard to focus when the movements were so fast.

The last image was of the monument we were kneeling next to. And then the tablet cleared, and across the blank surface, one black line slowly etched out a new picture. Drake and I exchanged an excited glance. What would we see?

Finally, the image developed into the exact same picture the Watcher had shown us except that underneath the cross extended a series of squiggles that I eventually realised were roots of a tree. The others came to see, and before our eyes, the roots turned black then broke away. Dark flakes fell off the tablet. And then it shrank back into an unassuming stone.

"That was... something," Dymphna said.

Drake looked at me. "We did it. We found it. You were right, Cara. It was here all the time."

The wind howled, making me uneasy. "We should go. If we're going to see everyone before we return, we need to be quick."

He helped me to my feet as the others stepped away. "Take it," he murmured. "Take the stone."

I thought of Brendan with the sword and shook my head. "You can hold on to it." I blinked a couple of times, unsettled by the intensity in his violet eyes. "I trust you to take good care of it."

A breath rushed out of him, and I realised he was relieved.

"You believe me," he said. "You understand the things I did."

"I'm not sure I'll ever understand everything, Drake. But I don't think you're going to gather the treasures and become a faery dictator, either."

"I'll take it when the rift is closed. You'll be on Dubh. If anything happens, at least you'll be able to get away with the stone. For now, that's more important than anything else."

"Then you'll have it when we're done. Take good care of it."

His smile was wistful. "Thank you. Not for the stone—for not hating me."

I felt sick. "As soon as we go back, you'll be the same again. Worse, even. And if you have a child with Sorcha..."

"Scarlet won't be in danger," he said firmly. "I promise you."

Faery promises meant nothing and everything. "Let's go. I need to hold my baby."

But as we travelled away from Tara, out of Meath, and back to Dublin, something bugged me. The sword didn't reveal itself until Brendan and I were both holding it. The stone didn't reveal itself until Drake and I were both touching it. And the spear hadn't revealed itself to me at all. Did that mean we had to wait until the thing was ready to show itself, or that we needed two of us to unleash the power? If the latter was the case, perhaps that meant Drake and I were true royals, and even the legendary treasures accepted us as well as Brendan.

I ran to my grandparents' front door, leaving the others to catch up. It opened before I even reached it. Arms welcomed me inside, and the hounds nibbled excitedly at my ankles, but I only had eyes for one: Scarlet. She was bigger already, and her hair had even lengthened. How long would I be away from her? I held her close to me, ignoring her struggles to get onto her feet and walk. I inhaled her scent and felt I was home because home was wherever she was.

"I'm sorry. I need a few minutes with her. I'll be back." I ran upstairs and let the others deal with the storytelling. I just wanted a few selfish moments with my baby—that was all. I sat on my old bed and just looked at her for a moment. The teardrop in her eye hadn't changed, and her readiness to smile hadn't lessened. She babbled something that sounded like real words, and I knew that the next time I saw her, she would be a completely different child.

"I'm doing this for you," I whispered as she tried to take my dagger out. I took her hand and kissed her fingers. She laughed and threw herself at me. She loved everyone, and I wasn't sure sometimes if she loved me any better than anyone else, but I didn't care. I only had eyes for her.

A soft knock at the door came a few minutes later. "Come in," I said, annoyed.

To my surprise, Drake walked in. I sat up straighter.

"I'm sorry," he said. "Can I just... can I just watch her?"

I held on to her, shielding her from the pain he would bring her, and then realised that wasn't fair. I moved aside and gestured for him to sit. At first, he sat at the edge of the bed, but then he inched closer.

"Let her see your wings," I said, trying not to smile. "She likes wings."

He smiled. "Like mother, like daughter." He knelt on the bed and released his cloak. His wings sprang to life, glittering in the dull light. Scarlet's eyes immediately locked on to the pretty sparkling, and she tried to grab him. I caught her hand just in time.

"Softly," I said. "Be gentle. There, there." I showed her how to touch them without damaging them. She copied me as best she could, and when I looked up at Drake, he had tears in his eyes. "Are you okay?" I asked, feeling a lump in my own throat.

He shook his head, still kneeling there, frozen to the spot. He looked so lost and overwhelmed that I felt sorry for him.

I moved onto my knees, lifting Scarlet into my arms. She was too fascinated by the rapidly moving wings to protest. "Do you want to hold her?" I asked, even though it felt like cutting out my heart and handing it to him.

He nodded although he seemed unsure. I held her out to him, but he wrapped his arms around both of us and just held us to him. Tears filled my eyes as he spoke in the most heart-wrenching voice I had ever heard. "She was right. The witch of the blackthorns knew me better than I knew myself. The symptoms, not the cause."

I had no idea what he was talking about, but I stayed silent.

"I really wanted a family," he admitted. "Unconditional love and trust... but I _thought_ I wanted to kill those who took it from me. I thought revenge would make the pain go away. I didn't realise that I made my own family, and I gave it away." He trembled with emotion. "She'll never call me father. She'll never be proud of me or look up to me or even respect me."

"You don't know how she'll feel. She might be better at understanding than I am."

"I thought I was doing right by you, but I've made the worst mistakes, haven't I?"

"It's done now," I said gently, actually able to move past the anger. "We never really knew each other. It couldn't have worked. I know that now."

"The king can't love her," he said, his voice shaking. "The king can't love either of you."

"We love each other enough. We don't need a king to take care of us."

"I've never seen anything like her. And if I favour her, others will use her to hurt me." He let out a harsh laugh. "What kind of child will a banshee give me? Not one who smiles but one who brings death. How can I love a creature like that?"

"Don't say that." I pulled away. "You can't blame children for the mistakes of their parents."

"That's what happened to you," he said dully.

"Forget that. You can't be that person, either. You'll love any child Sorcha has."

"What if I can't? What if I only want this one?"

His words were scaring me. "You can always see Scarlet," I said. "I won't stop you from getting to know her. I won't ever ask you to keep away. That'll be her decision to make when she's old enough. I want what's best for her, and I know what it's like to not understand where we come from. You do, too."

"I thought you didn't want me to have a child with Sorcha because you loved me. But I was wrong. You don't want me to replace Scarlet."

"You won't do that," I said firmly. "And I already love her enough for the two of us, so she won't be missing out even if you aren't there for her. Just don't make her promises you can't keep."

He nodded and let go of me to wipe his face dry. "No wonder we think love is weakness," he said unhappily.

"You can change things. Look how much we've already changed in the last couple of years. If you can't be her dad, then maybe you can be her friend someday."

"And you? Can I be your friend someday?"

I had gone through so much that I couldn't say no. I didn't want to lose any more friends, and I knew he couldn't make any promises, but that was okay. I couldn't promise him anything, either. But maybe between us, we could give Scarlet what she needed.

We headed back downstairs. I hugged my grandparents then Bekind and finally turned to Zoe. "I'm glad you're here."

She made a face at Bekind. "Yeah, I'm glad you're here, too. Something happened."

"What's wrong?"

Vix made a sound of disgust. "That fae you sent to us ran away, leaving her baby behind."

"What? Marie left the child? Here?"

"Stop it," Zoe said to Vix. "You know as well as I do that she was terrified."

"Terrified? Of what?" I asked.

"Fiadh, of course," Vix said. "She thinks the child is safer under your care."

"Where's the baby?"

"Here." Líle came into the living room and handed the child to me.

She was so light, so small, and the taint had gripped her thoroughly. Her eyes were dull grey, and her hair was almost as dark as Scarlet's. "Poor thing," I said. "I don't know why Marie's so scared. Is postnatal depression a thing for faeries?"

Vix rolled her eyes. "Are you being purposely foolish?"

"Vix," Rumble warned, "watch your mouth."

"But she doesn't get it," Vix complained. She looked at me. "Where's Fiadh now?"

I frowned. "At court? Or taking back her land."

"And how do you think she's going to do that?" Vix asked.

"Glic is dead. It won't take much." I rocked the baby in my arms. "She just needs to show up."

"Show up." Vix snorted. "And what about all of those children of Glic, the ones with claims on Setanta's heritage?"

"It's Fiadh's home."

" _Was_ Fiadh's home," Bekind added. "Sadler gave it to Glic. Any one of his children could make claim to it."

I held the baby a little tighter. "What are you saying?"

Vix looked exasperated. "She's gone to kill them all. Every one of them. That's why Marie ran. She'll die, too."

"She thought the child would be safe here and that Fiadh wouldn't think to look here for a child of Glic—for a contender to what should be her son's," Bekind said gently.

"She wouldn't kill a baby," I said. "She's a mother."

"She's a Darksider," Drake said.

"She's a faery," Bekind said.

Vix shot both of them a dirty look. "She's a _noble_."

My insides roiled. "We have to stop her. Why didn't I see this?"

Dymphna shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "I admit, I didn't think Fiadh capable of killing babies, but looking back, I see how she would go down this path."

"It's too late to stop her," Rumble said. "She was already planning to leave when I left the court."

I sank into a chair, still staring at the child in my arms. "We can't let her kill _this_ child then. If I'm too late for the others, I can still save this one."

"She might die anyway," Vix said brusquely.

"Do you ever shut up?" I snapped.

"She's been ill," Bekind explained. "Her legs trouble her, the Miacha have said."

"Can they help her?" I demanded.

"Only so far," Bekind said.

"Scarlet helps her," Zoe said. "She's happier when Scarlet's nearby. It's like... she forgets the pain or something."

"Right." Of course Scarlet helped her. Scarlet helped everyone. My baby was the freaking miracle cure. And this baby would die if we didn't help her. "There's only one thing for it then."

"What's that?" Líle asked.

"I'm just going to have to make this baby my daughter, too."

"Cara," Zoe exclaimed. "You can't just go around picking up stray children."

"You said it yourself. Scarlet makes her better. She can be her playmate, her companion, and if she's mine, Fiadh won't dare touch her."

"That's a wonderful idea, my dear," Gran said. "But are you sure you want to look after another baby?"

I gazed down at the weakly child in my arms. She wasn't pretty or endearing like Scarlet. There was nothing easy and loveable about her. And that brought out a protective instinct in me. Nobody else would love this child, so I was determined to. For better or worse, if I wanted to teach the Darksiders how to behave, I had to lead by example.

"I'm keeping her," I said, "until Marie comes back for her, and then we'll see what happens."

"She doesn't even have a name," Vix scoffed.

"That doesn't mean I can't give her one." I pursed my lips. "Marie talked about the name Liliana, so we'll call her that. As soon as I come back, I'll sort everything out."

"We should go," Drake said.

"At least stay for dinner," Gran said pleadingly.

I looked at Drake, and he shrugged. "An hour or two won't hurt."

Setanta was napping, and Dymphna spent some time alone with Eithne. I managed to grab a few minutes with Zoe, Bekind, and my grandparents in the kitchen. I sat on a chair, Scarlet on my knee and the newly named Liliana in one arm. The hounds lay at my feet, uncomfortably heavy. They had definitely been fed in my absence.

I sighed at how comfortable I felt with two children in my arms. "This got strange quick."

"I take it that's Scarlet's father out there," Gran said.

I nodded, suddenly exhausted.

"I can tell him to leave," Granddad said.

"It's okay. I'm all right with him being here. I can handle that at least."

We caught each other up on what we had missed.

"No trouble here, thank God," Zoe said. "Scarlet's been good as always, but little Eithne is the ringleader. She's the troublemaker."

I laughed. The normality of it all was so comforting.

"You're really going to keep that baby?" Zoe asked. "She cries a lot, you know."

"Babies tend to," I said dryly.

"Scarlet didn't," she retorted.

"Scarlet will always have people who love her." I held Zoe's gaze. "This one needs all the help she can get."

"I feel bad for her," Zoe admitted. "But it still seems strange to just take her in."

"What else am I going to do? It's just until I can sort out this situation with Fiadh and Marie." I just had to figure out how.

Before long, we were all squashed around the kitchen table for a shared dinner.

Líle looked at me. "You said you left with Brendan and Bran. Where are they now?"

I tried not to frown. "They've gone across the sea. With Yvette. On her boat."

Líle gave me a curious look. "Across the sea is not the usual honeymoon destination."

"Yeah, well, life's gone a bit crazy. We heard the First Tree might be there, so he's going, and he's not coming back until he finds it. I think that means a brownie might be in charge of the realm for a while."

To my surprise, Bekind laughed aloud.

"What?" I asked.

She shook her head, but she had to wipe tears from her eyes. "Nothing, nothing. Carry on."

"Anyway," I said with a scowl, "we have to go to the Fade again and see if we can figure this stone out."

"If it works, will the realm be fixed?" Anya asked.

Dymphna wrapped her arm around her daughter. "Let's hope it goes a ways to healing the land."

"At the very least, it could prevent more of the blight from spreading," Drake said. "But we'll need the trees to clear the existing blight."

"And then what?" Gran asked. "Does everything go back to normal?"

"Likely not," Rumble said.

I went to the sink to pour out a glass of water. I was starting to worry that the stone wouldn't work on the rift without Brendan.

A hand on my shoulder startled me—Bekind. She led me out of the kitchen and away from the others. "You're upset because he's gone," she said in a scolding tone.

"What? No! I'm just... worried."

She cupped my cheek, and I could see she worried for me. "There was a time when I thought he would be good for you—the big, brash king, as you called him. But you chose Drake, and you let yourself get heartbroken. I've watched you suffer all this time. I've watched a piece of you that came to life on the very night you realised the fae were real wither and die because you learned that there are no happy endings. Don't let another one do the same to you. Don't let yourself be crushed when you see him with a wife by his side."

I blinked back sudden tears. "There are more important things going on right now, Bekind."

"I know," she said softly. "But you and your precious girl are the most important things to me. I love you both, and I don't want you to feel any more pain because of me."

"How is it because of you?" I was astonished that she was talking about love in that tone of voice.

"I let them take you. I wanted them to take you. I wanted there to be a child. I needed you to be a part of that world. And I regret it. I've put you in so much danger. After Sadler, I thought you would never smile again, but you did, and you got back on your feet, and you hardened yourself. Now, after a short time with Brendan, he has broken through again. In another life, it would be meant to be, I think. But in this life, it can only bring trouble if he's supposed to marry someone else."

"I haven't gone near Drake," I said. "I let him go. Why wouldn't I do the same with Brendan?"

She gave me a knowing smile. "As much as people like to forget, those two were never the same. Not even close. You have to remember that she is intent on marrying him, and if she's with him, away from home, then she will do everything she can to keep him. As soon as he stepped onto that boat, he was gone."

I swallowed hard. "I know, Bekind. I don't want anything from him or anyone."

"You tell me that, but we both know it's a lie. Give yourself time. There's so much to see in the world. You don't have to set your heart on any one thing or person or place. You can travel with Scarlet and me. When the land is healed, there'll be so much to see."

"Are you scared I'll leave you or something?" I said, trying to tease but coming off harsh.

" _Yes_. But you're so young, and you haven't had peace ever in your life. You're going to live a long time in the faery realm, and you'll need to find your place in both worlds when this is over—your place and Scarlet's. Find _you_ before you give your heart away completely."

I was able to smile then. "I've given it away completely already. To her. To Scarlet."

She bit her lip. "Everyone needs a different kind of comfort sometimes. I just want you to know that I'll be here for you when things get hard. When Scarlet's father claims another woman's child, and Brendan's not there to dry your eyes, you should know you have me and so many others."

"I thought I wanted you to open up, but your emotional side is terrifying me."

We laughed and hugged, and she drew me back into the kitchen with the others. But I couldn't forget her words. When Drake had his "real" son or daughter, and Brendan had a new wife, where would I be? Left in the Darkside with people who would be disappointed that the kings had forgotten me. And then what would happen to us?

# Chapter 23

The others pretended not to notice my tears when we left, but Drake held my hand as we stepped through the portal back to the blackthorn forest. In the human realm, we had gathered up bottled water for the witch or guardian or whatever she was. She watched us approach. The stick men were all gone.

"Only on a full moon," Dymphna said in answer to my unspoken question. "They only come to life under the moon. And even then, they looked to be dying."

"You could make it rain," I whispered to Drake as we walked. "You can alter the weather and help them."

"I can't." He looked doubtful. "That was with Brendan, and I struggled."

"That's because you were fighting against Sadler's magic."

"The old woman said Sadler's magic caused this drought."

"But he's dead. He's not maintaining it. It just _is_. You could change it for them."

He gave me a sideward glance. "Why do you always want to help everyone?"

"Why don't you anymore?"

He sighed as I pushed ahead of him.

We gave the old woman the water. "Don't waste your time on the dying," she said even as she looked longingly at the water.

"You're not dead yet," I said firmly. "I'll find a way to get water to you."

"We could try," Drake said, surprising me. "You and me together. We could maybe make it rain for a little while."

"Me?" I touched my throat. "I don't have that kind of magic."

"You feed us with your emotions. And you have the power of the Darkside behind you. We could do anything together now."

So, I fed them. A regular mother of the people I was turning out to be.

"The blight will kill us eventually," the old woman said. "But the drought will be quicker."

"She already told you she was going to find a way to stop the blight," Rumble said.

"And I believe she'll try," the old woman said. "But she might be too late."

"I don't like to give up." I grinned. "I'm optimistic that way. It's one of my human faults. Let's do it, Drake."

He pulled me away from the others.

"But, um, how exactly do we do this?" I asked.

He laughed. "The confidence is gone already? We'll figure it out. I'll try to start, and you just... I don't know, support me. Add to it. Flood me with emotion. This will only last for as long as we're here, but it'll be something."

He rolled his shoulders back and flexed his limbs. When he caught me staring, he tried to smile, but I could see how tense he was. He was terrified of failing without Brendan, I realised. How tightly the three of us were connected, whether we liked it or not.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath then held his hands out, palms upright. I hesitantly placed mine against his and followed suit. I sensed the others watching, but at least if we made fools of ourselves, we had a small audience.

It seemed as if nothing was happening, but then I felt a tingle in my palms. I imagined I could smell fresh rain, but the air was as warm and dry as always. Everyone kept saying I had the power of _my_ fae behind me, but I didn't know how to wield it—at least, not deliberately.

But I did know how to feel. Maybe if I imagined feeling the rain, it would help. "It rained the day we went to the beach," I said under my breath.

"Hmm?"

"The day I talked about in the tunnel. There was a sun shower. It was warm, almost like this, and the rain was cool against my skin. Scarlet and I danced in the rain while Anya hid under a canopy. The raindrops felt like kisses. They tickled. It was—"

I gasped as I felt a few drops of water on my cheeks.

"Hold on," Drake said, laughing. "It's just starting."

He held my hands as I threw back my head and looked up at the sky. The rain was cool and clean, and we had caused it to happen.

"See?" I cried as the rain drenched my hair. "You didn't need him."

The shower grew heavier, and I let go of Drake to twirl around.

Dymphna was laughing, and the witch held out her hands, a look of rapture on her face. I expected the ground to get soft, but it had been so hardened that the rain barely had a chance to wet the surface before it was sucked under.

The air shifted when Drake stopped projecting his magic, but the rain still fell. The old woman cooed to the trees, completely ignoring us.

"We should move on," Rumble said.

We were all in agreement. We headed back toward the horses.

I looked over my shoulder to see the white raven return to the woman. She didn't look so old anymore. She lifted her hand as if to acknowledge me. Drake asked me a question and distracted me. When I looked back a second time, the woman was gone.

My feet were blistered, but the cool rain stopped me from sweating at least. It died away, but not before the blackthorns had gotten a badly needed drink. I was determined to maintain a supply of water for the witch until we fixed the realm. We had to do something to help the fae who were suffering because of Sadler's actions. Maybe, when everything was over, I would take Bekind up on her offer to travel the realm, if only to get to know the place and its people a little better.

"We need to reach Grim and let him know we have the stone and what became of Brendan," Drake said as we walked. "And then we must get to the Fade. We'll have to cross the Hauntings again."

I nodded, determined. "We can do it. We'll all be together, and we'll do it."

"I have no doubt," he said. "But it won't be easy to go so far."

"We'll be safe on the Darkside," Rumble said.

"I'm not worried about the Darkside," Drake said in a low voice. "Not anymore. I'm worried about the valley. I'm worried about the Fade. And if Sadler was really collecting these treasures, it's not outrageous to think his followers might be trying to finish the job. I won't feel comfortable until we're safely back in our territories with the rift sealed."

He didn't say he was worried that the stone might not work, but he might as well have screamed it. There were so many unknowns.

The horses were exactly where we had left them, but the idea that I would be away from Scarlet for longer than I'd expected was growing stronger by the moment. Scarlet had been content in Zoe's arms, and I should have been grateful for that, but I was too selfish. Part of me wanted to be missed, to be the only one for her, but maybe my daughter was teaching me a lesson that Grim had tried to gently pass on to me: I couldn't rest my happiness on the shoulders of one little girl. It wasn't good for either of us.

Dubh didn't bite when I reached him. He leaned his chin on top of my head, and it was comforting. "Stupidly big faery horse," I whispered as he whinnied too close to my ear.

We loaded up again and moved on, not going anywhere near Yvette's land. We passed through tiny villages where the locals welcomed us with awe in their eyes. We carried no flags, but everyone knew who we were and what we had set out to do. In every place, people stopped, fed, and fawned over us before allowing us to leave. The fae had spent too long being terrified of their leaders. We had suddenly become approachable. As Dymphna had hinted, perhaps they saw us as heroes on a noble quest. We couldn't let them down.

"Nothing's secret around here, is it?" I asked wryly after another eventful day.

"Not a lot," Dymphna said.

We camped close to a village that night but away from prying eyes. Drake and I huddled together around the fire, our backs to the freezing night air, trying to plan for failure.

"I think we should go down to the cave alone," I whispered. "Just you and I. With the stone, it's like we both have to touch it for it to work, and maybe I'm wrong, but I don't want to test that theory."

"You're right." He hesitated. "Have you thought of what will happen to the realm if this goes wrong, and we both die?"

"Only all of the time." I rubbed my hands together. He made to cover them with his, but I gently pulled out of his reach. "Scarlet will need a new regent, and Sorcha will be in charge of the Silver Court." I looked at him. "Will she try to kill Scarlet when you're dead?"

"I don't think so." He looked uncomfortable. "She's not... who I thought she was."

"It's okay," I said gently. "I know she's capable of love, and I'm sure she has more layers than just dark and evil. I'm over the past as long as she doesn't try to harm Scarlet. You don't have to pretend you hate her on my account."

"I don't... _hate_ her. Sometimes I pity her. The Silver Court isn't pleasant, Cara. They call her barren behind her back and laugh to her face. There's only so much I can do. Donella doesn't help."

"I can imagine."

"She fills Sorcha's head with ideas and makes her think they're her own. And Sorcha plays right into her hands, so Donella can turn to the others and ridicule her bad sense."

"So, get rid of Donella."

"If I truly lose her, I'll lose half my court."

I sighed with frustration. He would never learn. "What does Donella want?"

"A crown." He gave me a pathetic look. "I haven't touched her."

"I didn't say anything."

"Your eyes said everything. She knows that Brendan despises her, and she missed her chance to befriend you, so she turns to me, seeing me as the weakest of the three, the one who needs her most."

I frowned. "I thought everyone saw me as the weak one."

"Perspective. Brendan thinks the same about himself. That's why he even entertains the idea of marriage to Yvette. He feels obligated."

"What about me? Am I going to feel obligated? Or worse, is Scarlet?"

"You've already provided an heir. Unless there's some male fae with an army and a huge parcel of land to share with you, then no, you won't be pressured into anything."

"But Scarlet will."

He gave me a fierce look. "We've plenty of time to change the rules before the children grow up to be affected by them."

I held my hands closer to the fire, unable to get the warmth into me. "Maybe they already are affected. I've been thinking about this whole thing with Setanta and Liliana. Even you and fae like Rumble and Vix. You're half siblings, but you can't be a family. The rules make you enemies at birth. You and Brendan could have children who might become Scarlet's rivals someday—like the queens. They were twins, and they despised each other."

"We won't let that happen. We'll fix our mistakes with the next generation."

"And if Brendan gets married to Yvette and her massive army and decides he doesn't like the way we've taken his realm?"

"Then you and I must stick together to defend against him."

I opened my mouth to protest, but he held up his hands to stop me.

"We were given what we have," he said. "Circumstances might not be ideal, but Brendan deserved his punishment. He wasn't a wise or worthy leader the first time around, and he lost some of his responsibilities."

"He's wise and worthy now."

"We don't see him through the same eyes. But he's made a great sacrifice for the realm, so perhaps you see him through clearer eyes than I do."

And that was probably the best I was going to get from the faery whose body had almost been stolen by the returning king.

Dubh reared and whinnied, his eyes wide with alarm. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes as the others leapt to their feet, expecting trouble. A group of soldiers burst through the undergrowth and surrounded us. Their leader was dressed in the same slate-grey armour as the others, but his sneer reminded me of a certain Fox.

"What do you mean by this?" Drake demanded as Rumble and Dymphna unsheathed their swords. I moved to Drake's side, trying to look furious when what I felt was terrified.

The soldier circled us slowly, and I spotted an insignia on his saddle that looked vaguely familiar. I couldn't place it, but I still considered it a bad sign.

"Trespassers deserve death," the man rasped, his eyes on me. Why did everyone always look at the human when they talked about killing things?

"Trespassers," Dymphna scoffed. "Do you know to whom you speak?"

"I don't care." The man was raising his sword when a young, eager voice commanded him to stop.

The soldier's face wrinkled into one of weary impatience. "What now?"

"Leave them be," said a young man with brown hair.

A blonde rode into the clearing after him, looking startled when she caught sight of the scene. "Aiken? What's happening?"

"Who are you?" Drake asked.

"You're talking to the only daughter of MacKenzie," the soldier spat, "so why don't—"

"Enough," the woman said, steeling her voice in a way the man beside her couldn't. And I realised I had seen the pair of them before. In the woods, on the way to the Fade, they had passed with a carriage. According to Grim, MacKenzie wasn't someone I wanted to meet.

"They're trespassing," the soldier said almost pleadingly.

"They're royalty," the young man said. "It _is_ he, isn't it?"

The young woman slid off her horse. "I must apologise. My men are overly vigilant when it comes to protecting my father's most prized possession." She said the words in a sarcastic tone. "You are the king and queen of the Silver Court, are you not?"

Drake nodded, but I held up my ringed hand. "I'm the Darksider, actually."

"Silver and Chaos together," she said, her eyes gleaming. "Father will be most interested. We had heard there was a secret mission the royals were attending to."

"It's not a secret," I said. "The three of us set out to save the realm. And we'll continue on our way if your trained dogs here will step aside."

She smiled as if encouraged. "Well, now that we've officially met, I'll have to invite you to my home to meet my father."

"We're in a hurry," Drake said.

"Come for dinner," she said, almost pleading. "That's all I ask. Father hasn't vowed for any one court, and he is a worthy ally, I assure you."

I bit back a remark about adding even more cruelty to my court.

Drake looked interested, however. "We can eat with you, but we must move on by morning."

"Of course." She looked at me with a great deal of interest. "I've heard so much about you. It's a pleasure to finally put a face to the name."

I gave her my best smile, which, under the circumstances, was more than a little pained. We were stuck following her after that. In less than an hour, we reached a mansion.

"Plenty of hunting land," the young man was saying to Drake, sounding proud even though the land wasn't his. Maybe it would be someday.

"I'm Leonora, by the way," the girl told me. "Although I'm often only known as the daughter of MacKenzie."

"That's okay. I'm often only known as the human."

Her tinkling laugh might have made me smile if I weren't so grumpy. She seemed pleasant enough, but if her father was a figure of terror, I didn't want to linger in her home.

We reached the buildings, and our horses were taken by groomsmen, which made me uneasy. Leonora seemed to sense that and reassured me that they would be treated well and returned to us when we needed them. Then she took us inside and directed servants to help us get cleaned up.

The stone mansion was stark and cold. It wasn't showy like a castle, but inside, the rooms were huge. In all honesty, I was glad to have a bath. When I was done, a clean dress had been laid out for me, and my cloak was gone. My heart raced in my chest as some pixies prepared me for dinner. I barely paid attention to them, and I groaned when I caught sight of their creativity in the mirror. They had made me look like a freaking geisha with super pale skin, red lips, and heavy kohl around my eyes. I was called for dinner, so it was too late to clean the crap off my face.

I met Drake in the hallway in a panic. He looked startled by my appearance.

"Not a word. The stone is gone," I whispered. "They took it."

"They won't even know what it is. Don't worry."

Before I could argue the point, we were escorted into a huge dining hall where a lavish dinner had been supplied. Large fires burned in fireplaces on either side of the room, and dozens of candles lit the space.

Leonora rushed to greet me. She took my hands and led me to her father. He stood and studied me. He wasn't tall, but he had a commanding presence, and his cold gaze made me forget I was supposed to be a queen.

"This is MacKenzie. Father, this is the Darksider Queen."

"Cara," I added, embarrassed by his thorough inspection of my face.

"Did you ask for this?" He waved his hands over his face.

"I did not," I said indignantly. "Your pixies went to town without my knowledge or consent."

His grey eyes narrowed. "Guests are generally more polite to their hosts."

"Hosts generally don't steal my clothes while their pixies turn me into a living doll."

He arched one grey brow. In fact, everything about him was grey. Even Leonora, blond and normally pretty, looked washed out and ill next to him. The blood-red dress I had been given to wear was the only saturated colour in the room, and for whatever reason, that made me uncomfortable.

"It's hard for the little pixies," he said. "The last time a woman was in the house, she was going through a phase of all things human."

"Father, I'm a woman," Leonora said impatiently.

"No, you're my daughter." He looked me up and down, not a trace of subtlety in the action. "And fetch the queen her clothes before the realms think us petty thieves," he shouted at someone while holding my gaze. He held out an arm. "Let's have dinner, shall we?"

I hesitantly put my arm in his. MacKenzie was evidently king of _his_ castle. He made me sit next to him at the table. He barely ate, focusing most of his attention on me, which made me too uncomfortable to eat much. I shot a wide-eyed look at Drake, who shrugged.

"You've journeyed long." MacKenzie tapped his hooked nose. "The secret lives of the royal and infamous."

I opened my mouth, ready with a smart remark of my own, but a servant approached the table with my cloak.

"Ah, the queen's belongings," MacKenzie said, wiping his mouth before making an exaggerated attempt to take it out of his servant's hands.

"Thievery," he said mockingly, peering at the frayed edges. His hand slipped into the pocket and took out the stone. He eyed me with fascination.

"I like geology," I said, snatching it back and praying it wouldn't transform into a magical tablet again.

"Interesting." He gestured toward his daughter's friend. "Perhaps Aiken can give you a tour of my land. He likes dull objects, too."

Leonora flinched as though he were referring to her.

"We have to move on quickly," Drake said, sensing my growing need to bite back hard.

"Everyone is fascinated with moving quickly these days. My dear Leonora, do you _really_ have to stare?" he added with startling hypocrisy.

"I never see humans," she gushed, and I derived the added words _or anyone_ from her tone.

"I've seen you and Aiken before, actually. We didn't meet—don't worry." I gestured at Drake. "It was around the time of his coronation. You were travelling through the Great Forest with Aiken. There was a carriage behind you, and you heard me move."

"Move?" MacKenzie leaned forward as though fascinated. "What were you doing in the forest?"

"Hiding," I said matter-of-factly. "This was before I had an army of my own."

He chuckled then waved at me to continue.

"You were worried we were bandits, I think. Aiken warned us that your father was close by."

MacKenzie snorted with a cold kind of laughter. "Warning the little human that Daddy would hurt her if she approached?"

"Well, he didn't know who we were," I said. "And according to those _in_ the know, he might as well have been warning us for our own sakes because a bloodthirsty hunter once loyal to a mad queen was following. We waited until—"

"We?"

"A sprite, a brownie, a cat, and I," I deadpanned.

"Simply terrifying," he uttered, and a tiny part of me started to like him despite myself.

"We waited until you passed, and I felt glad I wasn't Drake, who had to accept fealty from such people."

Leonora had gone pale, but after Sadler, I didn't intend on being cowed by anyone ever again.

"Ah, but I must disagree. I didn't actually pledge fealty that day," MacKenzie said.

"So, you accept that you're a bloodthirsty hunter once loyal to a mad queen."

"The human did trick me."

"I think you'll find it was a queen," I said.

"Well, Queen of Chaos, tell me more."

I picked up my fork and began to eat, feeling everyone's eyes on me. MacKenzie was a big man in his own castle, but he didn't own the world, and he certainly didn't own me. I wasn't in danger. _Yet_.

Leonora and Aiken began to speak loudly as if to distract from my cheekiness.

"Look at her," MacKenzie said under his breath after a few moments. "Silly little airhead. I thought to marry her to the Green king, who I hear is pleasant enough to look at, and she said she would rather die. Daughters, eh?"

"I was forced to marry my daughter's crazy great-grandfather," I said dryly. "Do I really look like the sort of person who approves of girls being compelled to marry?"

"Ah, of course." He touched the green-and-silver bracelet on my wrist. "You believe in love as all humans do."

"Love is a lie." I allowed myself a tiny smile. "But it's a good lie all the same."

"I should marry again just to spite her," he said. "Not that she'd care. Too busy with her head in the clouds—she and that Aiken."

"You haven't sent him away," I said, remembering how Donella had wanted to separate her son from poor Bekind.

"I like it when she smiles more than when she cries." He handed me my cloak. "Perhaps you want to keep all of your secrets to yourself, my lady, but I find I'm very curious."

"Curiosity killed the cat."

"Some cats never die," he said softly. "Or so I hear."

I gave him a stern look. "Good for them."

"As you say. And I heard you were on a journey with two kings. Did the second displease you as much as your husband?"

My stern look turned into a glare. "Brendan hasn't risked the realm yet. Let me know when you do."

His laughter surprised everyone—even he looked startled. "I understand it now," he said, half under his breath. "Sometimes one tires of always being agreed with." He stabbed his meat with his fork. "And is it true about this other king? Is he really a woman's dream?"

"He's very handsome."

"Not like me."

I met his eyes as I struggled to hold in my laughter. "Not like you at all."

He relaxed in his chair. "But if he's deserted you on your quest, then he's surely not as brave as they claim."

"Actually, he's braver. He's gone across the sea on a mission of his own."

That surprised him. He sat up straight. "Across the sea? On a boat?"

"That's generally how it's done," I said dryly. "His future bride is in possession of a boat, and they've gone together."

He screwed up his face. "Which future bride owns a boat, of all things?"

"Her name is Yvette. She lives—"

"I know who you mean." His cheeks flooded with a wash of pink. "I wouldn't expect him to return anytime soon."

I gave him a sharp look, but his conversation turned more conventional. Yet I couldn't settle. There was a dark, quivering anger lying just under the surface of that man, and he was ready to unleash it when he felt it necessary. But something made me respect him. Maybe it was because I now knew how difficult the hard choices were. Or maybe it was because he'd echoed my misgivings about Yvette.

Before dinner was over, I offered to host Leonora at my home. I wasn't altogether serious at first, but when her eyes lit up as though all of her birthdays and Christmases had come at once, I knew I had to force the issue.

"She can, can't she?" I asked MacKenzie.

Leonora looked surprised when he said yes without hesitation.

After dinner, I excused myself to clean off the pixies' heavy-handed work and change into my own clothes before checking on Dubh. At the stables, a giant black dog got in my way.

"Don't worry," MacKenzie said from behind a nearby tree. All I could see of him was a shadow and a wisp of smoke. "He won't eat you."

I tried to disguise my fright. "Is that a cú sídhe?"

"Ah, I forgot. The Silver king gifted you the one we sold him. I made Leonora send him the white runt. If I'd known it was your gift, I would have given you a beauty."

"I happen to like the white runt." I moved toward the fully grown cú sídhe in awe. It was almost as tall as me, even on four legs. "Will mine grow to this size?"

"This one's a brute, the biggest I've seen, but even a runt will be larger than any dog." He approached me, putting out a cigar, which surprised me.

"It's not just the women who are into human things," I said.

He looked at me and smiled. "Correct. And are _you_ fleeing in the night from the dreaded MacKenzie then?"

"No. Sorry to disappoint you. I'm just checking that my horse hasn't killed anyone."

"This getup suits you better than your pixie dinner attire," he remarked. He took my arm and guided me into the stables. When I reached for Dubh, MacKenzie chuckled. "Of course, that one is yours."

I hid my smile.

"I hear your daughter is strong and healthy, a boon to the dark court."

I turned and faced him, feeling fierce. "And what is it to you?"

He smirked. "You've met my daughter. Weak. Simpleminded, even. Not bad for a child, but for my child? A disappointment. I _like_ her, but she can't lead in my stead."

"She seemed to have control over those soldiers who came upon us."

"Those fools would piss themselves if I so much as looked them directly in the eye. I blame her mother. She was pretty but ridiculous." He rolled his eyes. "An utter fool."

I stared at him, wondering why the hell he was telling me his life story.

"I want something better. I've always wanted more from life, and I look at you, someone who has made more from life. Together, we could do astonishing things."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm proposing," he said. "I want to marry you."

I blinked rapidly. "Um, we just met today."

"I'm not looking for your heart."

"Then what are you looking for?"

"What all men seek: power. When the time comes to take sides, I want to take yours. You're young and strong, cunning enough to survive anything, and you've already produced a good child. Marry me, give me a son, and I'll give you knowledge and an army that would make either of those pathetic kings weep."

"I've been married."

"To Sadler. A weak-minded, suggestible fool who barely understood what was going on. I can be your general. I can lead your troops. I can protect your daughter and you. Between us, we have the traits needed to rule the entire realm, not just the Darkside. We would be an unstoppable force."

"I'm flattered." _Sort of_. "But—"

"Think about it." He touched my waist. "I could make you untouchable."

"I'll... think on it. But we're leaving in the morning."

"Of course," he said. "Perhaps I'll visit you with Leonora."

He left me then, and I shivered. The cold didn't leave me until we were all safely away from MacKenzie's home the next morning.

"What's wrong?" Dymphna asked as we rode.

I blinked. "Who said something's wrong?"

"Well, I've called your name four or five times, and all I've gotten is a grunt in response. I'm guessing there's something on your mind."

I looked over my shoulder to make sure the others were out of hearing distance. "Something weird happened last night. MacKenzie... proposed."

She didn't even look surprised. "I thought he might."

"What? _I_ didn't!"

"You're the most eligible woman in the realm." She laughed when I made a face. "And you could do worse than a man like MacKenzie." She hesitated. "If Brendan married Yvette, then someone like MacKenzie could be your safety net if everything goes wrong."

Great. Yet another detail to worry about. Who knew life as a queen would be so complicated?

# Chapter 24

We finally reached the Green Court. Even at a fair distance away, familiar green flags could be seen flying proudly from the rounded turrets. The ivy-covered castle was like something from a little girl's dreams of being a princess. My castle was derelict in comparison.

Grim waited at the gates to greet us. A good chunk of Brendan's army lined up in the courtyard, too, which made me feel uncomfortable. Realtín flew at me and wrapped herself around my neck. At least some things hadn't changed.

"We can't linger," Drake said. "We just wanted to update you."

"Come to the study," Grim said.

We made sure the horses were being taken care of then followed him inside. As soon as we sat in Brendan's office, Grim leaned forward, giving Drake a keen look. "What has happened?"

"Brendan took Yvette's ship, with Yvette on board, to find the first trees across the water."

Grim looked taken aback. "How odd. Have you come straight from there?"

"No. We found the stone of destiny in the human realm."

"The human realm. Of course," Grim said thoughtfully. "And you're now on your way to the Fade."

"There's no other course to take."

"Anything else I should know about?"

As Drake filled Grim in on our journey so far, I couldn't helping noticing that a Green Court adviser stood in the place of the friend I had expected to see. I realised I might never find a way to have all my friends around me again. My inner circle was broken up and separated. I had only been able to draw them together when I was just a human. A queen couldn't perform the same task.

Before we left again, I pulled Grim aside. "When it all goes wrong, if I don't come back—"

"You're going to come back."

"If I don't, I need you to be a friend to Scarlet. I need to know you'll care about her. You and Bekind are the ones I trust with her. Has that changed for you?"

"Nothing has changed."

"Grim." I tried on a weak smile for size. "Everything has changed. You were right about Brendan's marriage. He won't be my friend when that happens. He'll be the king of a rival court. You didn't pledge fealty to anyone. You're here because you choose to be. Will you choose to watch over Scarlet?"

He took my hand and squeezed my fingers. "She won't need me to, but if she does, I promise to be there. Scarlet won't come to any harm."

"She needs to visit the human realm regularly. She can't be raised to think that murder is normal. She has to know Zoe and my grandparents... and my mother."

"Your mother?"

"I think they deserve to know each other. I think that I can't let Scarlet carry my issues with her. She has to decide for herself, and when she's old enough, she can make so many decisions. She can choose where to live and who to have in her life. But it's only fair to give her all of the information first."

"Why are you thinking in this way?" he asked, sounding almost distraught.

"I have a bad feeling," I said, remembering the mirror. I would die alone, full of darkness. "You were right about something else, Grim. It's not fair to put my happiness on her. That was wrong of me, and I see it now."

He blinked a couple of times.

"There's one other thing," I said. "There's a baby left in my care. Liliana. I need you to make sure that she gets treated like Scarlet's sister until her mother returns. If that means protecting her from even a Darksider, then I need you to make sure it happens."

"Cara, why—"

"Goodbye, Grim."

It took us too long to reach the Hauntings. First, a group of soldiers from my court met us at the Hollows for news. They verified that Fiadh had gone to her ancestral home and that they hadn't heard from her since. I gave them news to pass on to the rest of my advisers.

After all the delays, we hadn't dared hesitate too long with the Watcher. One way or another, we needed to know if we could use the stone without Brendan. But after Drake had managed to call forth rain, I thought we stood a good chance.

At the Hauntings, I took the lead, remembering how badly our previous attempts had gone.

"Should we walk?" Rumble asked.

"Yes. The animals will be fine," I said. "They don't get caught up in the memories like we do. We all need to touch. We can hold hands. Don't break the chain, no matter what." I looked at Rumble. "It'll be worse for you because you've never done this before, but ignore everything you see. It's not real. Keep your eyes down as much as possible. I don't get caught up in the memories, so keep a tight hold of my hand."

He nodded his agreement. We all dismounted and stepped into the Hauntings.

As soon as we did, I felt a difference. Something I didn't understand lingered in the air, but there was a familiarity, too. I had felt this before; I just couldn't place it.

Drake and Rumble's hands tightened on mine as one, and I knew they saw a memory, but all I saw was mist.

"Hold on tight," I said, gritting my teeth as a gust of wind almost knocked me over. I looked up and frowned. There was a figure ahead of us. I squinted, but I couldn't make out any features. It didn't seem like a memory, but there was something dreamlike about it.

"Fire ahead," Rumble muttered.

"It's not real," Drake said.

"Keep walking, even if you have to pass through it," Dymphna said.

I felt heat, but I saw no fire, only that same figure. It beckoned me, and I had to put my head down to ignore it in case it led us somewhere we didn't want to go.

And then I heard a voice whispering. Shadows surrounded us. The others didn't appear to notice, so it was just for me. Old fears of the madness of summer wives jolted me.

Drake glanced at me, but I kept moving, determined to get through the Hauntings. My feet sank into the ground, and the whispers grew louder. _The only way to save her is to close the portals_.

Frowning, I listened harder. The voice continued. Sometimes, I made out only parts of sentences.

_Death comes..._

_Humans will die._

_The blight creeps on._

_Death haunts..._

_Close the portals._

_Blights can't be stopped._

_Death wins..._

_Save yourself._

_Save yourself._

_Close the portals._

_Cut off the realms._

_Death stops..._

I tried to shake off the words, but they kept coming, growing louder until they were shrieks right by my ear. And the shadows grew darker until I wasn't sure I was leading anyone anymore.

By the time we made it through, I was the only one shivering. The horses were waiting on the other side. Dubh gave an anxious stamp of his feet, and I ran my hands across his face, trying to calm myself as much as him.

"That was intense," Drake said, "but easier than before."

_Easier_? I nodded absentmindedly. "You doing okay, Rumble?"

He said something, but I had caught sight of movement on the water. I ran to the cliff, almost stumbling over the edge and then falling onto my backside in my struggle to regain balance.

"Careful!" Dymphna shouted as the others followed.

I was pointed outward. Across the water was a beach in the human realm complete with a quaint lighthouse. And in the distance sailed a boat I recognised as Yvette's. A green flag flew highest at the mast.

"It's Brendan!" I cried out, wondering how far he was from reaching whatever was across the sea.

"He's made it this far," Drake said.

"If anyone can do it, he can," Dymphna said.

I nodded, unable to speak. The worlds were so close that—I froze. That was what the voices meant. To stop the spread into the human realm, I needed to cut the realms off from each other completely. I could save Scarlet, but only if I condemned everyone else in the faery realm. I couldn't do that. I wouldn't even know how.

The stone was heavy in my pocket. It had been used to separate the realms, and we were about to seal up the rift. The stone of destiny could theoretically be used to cut off the human and faery realms from each other forever. But then I remembered the message had come from the Hauntings. Nothing was real there.

We camped at the summit of the Frozen Valley that night. The earth was more black than red, and when my hand moved off my blanket and onto the ground, it came away a blackened ruby colour. The stories about the Frozen Valley said the blood of fae buried there made the dirt red, but the blight had darkened it since my last visit.

"It's gotten bad," I murmured. I knew the others were still awake. None of us could sleep, but in the darkness, the descent was too risky.

"It'll get worse. It can always get worse," Drake said.

"It'll be over in the morning," Rumble said. "One way or another."

That night, another dream haunted me. I saw a trio of demigoddesses, whispering and giggling about giving _her_ back her gift. Had they been speaking to me in the Hauntings? But no, the new message was different, more confusing.

And then a voice said, "Cara, wake up," and I sat up, confused. I rubbed my temples, trying to figure out what I had been dreaming.

"Are you well?" Rumble asked in the darkness.

I got up and moved next to him. "No. I feel like I'm losing my mind. What did you see in the Hauntings, Rumble?"

He leaned forward, his shoulders hunched. He stared into the dying fire and shrugged. "I saw faces I recognised. I saw death. I saw... heartache. Is it always that way?"

"Usually."

He gave me a sharp look. Every scar on his face was highlighted by the glow of the fire. The more I looked, the more I saw beauty in it—a landscape of memories and strength. I was starting to see the faded stretch marks on my belly in the same light.

"What did you see?" he asked.

"I don't know. A person, calling me. I heard rather than saw. I heard voices—or one voice—telling me what to do. And I'm terrified that maybe the realm has finally gotten to me." I looked at him. "Maybe all I've ever been is a summer wife, after all. If something goes wrong, you have to leave me. You have to go back to the castle and make sure that everyone understands what has to happen next. And you and Vix have to make sure my daughter grows old."

"Needless panic," he murmured. "Hysterics. I thought you above all of that."

"Then you overestimated me."

He gave me a steady look. "I didn't."

"You're going to stay outside the cave. You and Dymphna. Drake and I already agreed. If it gets bad, both of you need to take the horses and run. If you stick together, you'll make it back through the Hauntings. If you reach the Watcher, he'll help you if you've gotten caught up in the memories."

"But—"

"Tell me you understand."

He didn't hesitate. "I understand."

"Good," I whispered.

The descent was difficult because the earth was wet and seeping. The horses slid, even Dubh.

"We need to climb," Drake said, peering over the edge. "If one of the horses falls..."

I immediately got off Dubh. "Stay," I commanded him. For a change, he listened. "Dymphna, you need to stay up here, too."

"I do not."

"Look at the way down. It's practically vertical. We're going to need you up here with a rope. When we go down, we're going to flatten it even more. We'll need help getting back up."

Drake nodded. "She's right. Rumble can hold the rope into the cave. We'll need you both for our escape."

He started to climb down even before Dymphna had organised the rope. I followed, but Rumble waited, perhaps worried he would crush one of us. I half slid most of the way, my fingers falling through the watery earth. Drake's face was splashed with red and black, a stark reminder of the accident he'd had the last time we'd made that same descent.

We reached the bottom without many problems. The stains on my hands were black rather than the berry they had been before. Rumble descended carefully, close to the rope. Dymphna was steady. The rope was attached to both her and the horses. It should hold if Rumble fell.

I moved to the spring to wash my hands and sighed. Last time, it had been pinkish. Now it was grey and purple.

"Are you ready?" Drake asked.

"No. Are you?"

He smiled and urged me toward the cave. It was darker than I remembered. No Realtín lit our way. "At last, I'll get my chance," he said. "What was it like? In the Fade, I mean."

"Terrifying. It felt like we could get lost in there forever, and the fenris was just... unreal."

"You still have the scars." He looked down at me, but my leg was covered. "They talked about you."

"Everyone keeps saying that."

"It's true. The gossip in the courts is always ridiculous, but you were the one constant—the human who changed everything. The one who kept two souls in one body. The one who freed the wrong soul. The one who went to the Fade to bring back the true king. The one who carried an heir. The one who managed to outsmart Sadler. The one who got away. The warrior queen. And now this will be spoken of for lifetimes. Our great-great-great-grandchildren will know Cara Kelly's true name. Don't you know how special that is?"

"I'm the upstart who stole a crown and caused the blight to worsen," I said snidely. "The one who ruined everything for everyone, and now I'm known for going back to the places I've already visited in a weak attempt to fix my own mistakes."

"Now you're just fishing for compliments."

I laughed, surprised to find myself still able to. "And you're still... _you_ somewhere in there."

He gave me a pained look.

Rumble joined us then. "Are you ready?"

Drake and I exchanged a look and nodded as one.

Rumble let down the rope. "I'll go first," I said. "I've done this before."

"No," Drake said.

"Yes," I said firmly. I was over being told what to do by faeries. It was motherhood, rather than being regent, that made me exasperated with being treated like a child.

I lifted my leg over and climbed into the cave. This time, I wasn't as reckless or determined as before. Without Realtín's light, the cave was scarier. I held on to the rope, trying not to put too much pressure on it. The water that dripped down the wall stung my eyes and left black spots in my already poor vision, but still, I lowered myself. Eventually, I made it to the bottom.

Drake followed. His wings were loose, the light in the darkness, just as he had looked the night we first met. He moved steadily, more sure-footed than I had been. I remembered the last time I had been in the cave, and I suppressed a nervous giggle. The scar on my calf itched as though the proximity of the rift irritated it.

Drake jumped to the end and reached for me. "Now for the hard part."

"You have the stone, right?"

He gave me a long, weary look before I told him I was kidding.

"How do we do this?" I whispered as we moved into the back of the cave, following the eerie green light that announced the rift's presence.

"We'll wing it," he replied, his eyes on the gap. "This is... not what I expected."

The green was as I remembered it, but in the light, I saw veins of black across the cave walls. I shivered at the thought of the cave being a living, blighted thing.

"The gap sort of sucked us through," I said, bending my head. "Let's hope we don't have to pass through."

"What if the stone doesn't work?"

I gave him a sharp look. "Shut up, Drake."

We crawled next to the rift. "Don't touch it," I said. "You might get pulled through."

He took deep breaths as I lifted the stone out of my pocket. It lay in my hands, a plain piece of rock—nothing special, nothing important—and I panicked. "What if—"

Drake pressed his finger against my lips. "You can shut up now, too."

He dragged his finger down, pulling my lower lip with it. And there it was again, that spark of attraction when we were in the face of danger. I jerked back then squeezed my eyes shut and held out my hand. I only opened my eyes when I felt his touch. He laid his hand over mine, and the two of us touched the stone together. Almost immediately, it transformed into a tablet. This time, it drew what was left of the blackthorns and then a cú sídhe before ending on the same image the Watcher had shown us.

"Is it just me, or is the blackness spreading across the drawing?" I whispered.

Drake nodded, his pale skin a sickly green in the light. "Can you feel that?"

I could. The tablet was pure. There was something cool and reliable about it. The darkness that shrouded us seemed to shrink away. I gestured at the wall. "Look at that." The veins of black were vanishing.

"We should hold it close to the rift," Drake said. "We need to hold on tight."

We gingerly held it toward the green rift in the Fade. The tablet seemed to sparkle in the darkness. The green light wavered than reached out and smothered our hands and the tablet.

"Hold on," I cried as the rift tried to suck in the tablet and ourselves. We braced ourselves, leaning against the walls even as our arms shook with the effort of holding on.

The sensation increased, and my shoulder wrenched with pain. "Something's happening!"

The light and the tablet were shimmering. For a moment, I worried that the Fade was breaking through, but the tablet warmed in my hands, and the green light shrank. The wall began to seal itself.

"It's working!" Drake shouted.

But our hands were still there; we were at risk of being trapped.

"At the last moment, we pull back, Drake."

I felt the tablet working. The stone of destiny was sealing the pathway between worlds just as it had done before. It grew almost too hot to hold. The rift decreased and transformed and shook around our hands. We inched back slowly, still feeling the pull. The rift was closing, but it wanted to take the tablet with it.

As the rift was reduced to only a thin line of colour, we pulled back. The tablet stuck fast, along with our hands.

"Pull!" Drake cried.

I leaned my feet against the wall and used my entire body to pull. With a strange scream, the rift let us go. We fell back, the tablet too hot to hold, and the rift was gone, leaving us in darkness.

I felt Drake reach for my hand. We held on to the tablet, even though it burned, because we knew how close we had come to being stuck forever.

My eyes adjusted to the darkness, and Drake's wings gave off a faint shimmer as he bent to pick up the tablet, which had turned back into a stone. He wrapped his arms around me. "We really did it," he whispered in my ear. "We closed the rift."

_Brendan had better not get sent to the Fade again._

The thought came unbidden, and I shivered. The rift was closed, and there was now no way to get into the Fade, bar death. In the future, if any of us were sent there, we would never leave.

# Chapter 25

The task was done. I'd given Drake the stone for safekeeping. All that was left for us to do was wait for Brendan to return with the trees we needed. The blight couldn't continue anymore, not with the rift sealed.

Unless a god made it so.

The four of us headed back as quickly as possible. The ship was long gone when we passed the cliff with the sea view. Weirdly, the sky over the beach was black and stormy, while ours was clear and blue. I desperately hoped I hadn't lost another year. I hadn't entered the Fade this time. Perhaps that made a difference.

Again, I heard whispers in the Hauntings, but they sounded disappointed. I ignored them.

We finally made it to the Watcher. He looked us all over with a great deal of concern, but finally, he gave us the all clear.

The Wife took me aside as we prepared to head for the tunnel. "We felt something," she said under her breath. "Heard something different in the Hauntings."

"Me, too," I said, but neither of us could explain what it had been. At least I knew I wasn't crazy. I wasn't the only one hearing the voices.

"Be wary," she said abruptly, pulling my cloak tight around my shoulders. "There's an evil wind blowing."

"We closed the rift."

"Then perhaps the rift was never the biggest problem."

All the way through the tunnel, I kept going over everything in my head. Something was off. I couldn't pinpoint what exactly. As we exited the tunnel, I happened to look up just in time to see a white raven fly overhead.

We rode together until we came across an exhausted rider who had apparently been searching for Drake. "The queen," she gasped. "She's ill. They sent me to find you."

The little colour Drake had drained from his face. "I have to go."

"Go," I said. "We've already done our part."

He reached out and squeezed my hand. "Thank you. Be ever watchful."

"I'll accompany you," Dymphna said, worry lines forming on her face.

"What do you want me to do about Eithne?" I asked.

"If you take her back to your court, I'll come for her as soon as I can," she promised.

"I will. Good luck, both of you."

We parted ways. I breathed out a sigh. "It doesn't feel quite real."

"You did a great thing," Rumble said. "It will feel real to the realm."

"Unless it doesn't work. Come on. I need to speak to the water fae."

"The water fae?" But he followed me without hesitation.

"I'm not going to be able to relax until I ask them something."

We rode until we made it to the banks of the River Garbh. I called out for the water fae. Only ripples appeared in the water at first. Then a young woman with a fishlike tail burst through the surface, somersaulting in the air before diving back in with a splash. When she lifted her head above water the second time, she was grinning. "She comes again."

"You all helped the realm once," I said. "But it's not over. We've sealed the rift in the Fade, but there's a ship on its way to find the First Tree. Across the water."

Murmurs from underneath the water made the river ripple.

"The trees will clean the earth, and the water, of the blight," I said loudly. "If the ship doesn't make it back safely, we're all dead. Can you guard it? Or watch for it to return? Anything?"

The mermaid-looking fae disappeared under the water. I waited impatiently for a few moments.

What looked like seaweed rose from the water to reveal a bare-breasted woman covered in grey-green scales. I knew that faery better than the other water fae.

"This is the last favour," she said, bobbing at the surface.

"It's not a favour," I said. "It's survival. Do it or don't, but the water is affected by this just as much as the soil."

The dozen or so tentacles that made up her lower body curled up from the water, revealing blackened tips. "We'll watch for the ship." She sank under the water again.

Relieved, I turned away. I wiped my eyes as I mounted Dubh. Rumble was watching me, but he didn't ask any questions. We rode on in silence, resting only when we had to, until we reached the castle.

We were greeted joyfully—the news had reached the court, and everyone knew that we had succeeded in sealing the rift. As the fae in my court congratulated me, I realised just how exhausted I was.

I spotted Rafe and waved him over. "Has Fiadh returned?"

He shook his head.

"Have you heard from her?"

"Only rumours."

"Rumours in which many children were murdered?" I asked coldly.

"I warned her not to be foolish," he said. "I told her that it would displease you."

"Send someone to find out what happened. If she harmed one child, she's not to return here. I don't want to see her. It's up to her whether she wants Setanta to stay here or be sent to her. I won't punish him for her actions." I hesitated. "And make sure she understands that if any harm comes to my foster daughter, it'll be on her head."

"Foster daughter?"

I sank into my throne and closed my eyes. "You'll meet her soon enough. One of Glic's children escaped before Fiadh got there, and I'll be taking care of her. She's to be treated as Scarlet's sister." I opened my eyes. "Understand?"

"Of course," he said in a quiet voice. "I think you've earned our loyalty by now, my lady."

I tried to smile. "Start organising transportation to the blackthorns. They're in desperate need of water." I yawned. "I'm wrecked, Rafe. Organise a party for everyone, but Rumble and I need to rest."

"Oh, before I forget," he said, "a package came for you from the Green Court. It's in your room."

"Grim must have discovered something. Thanks, Rafe. I'm glad you're here. It looks like everything went smoothly while I was gone."

He bowed. "Surprisingly so. I believe Levin has news for you, too, but we can talk more tomorrow."

I left him and went upstairs to have a quick soak in the bath. My tension left me in the water, and the reality of the situation finally sank in. We had accomplished so much, but there was so much more to do.

I headed back to my room. It felt empty without Scarlet and our entourage. On the bed lay a long, thin package with an envelope sealed with green wax. I opened the envelope first. It was just a short note.

* * *

_I n case I don't get another chance._

_B._

* * *

Puzzled, I opened the box. Inside was a slim silver bracelet set with green and black stones. In the centre was one large scarlet ruby. All of the colours of my world. I ran my finger across the bracelet, my eyes filling with tears. That was a goodbye if ever I saw one.

I replaced my frayed fabric bracelet with Brendan's gift. He understood me more than most did. And he had the sword of victory—he would be okay, no matter what happened. Drake had the stone, while I possessed a spear that looked like a prop from a vampire film. I checked the locked box under my bed. The spear was still there.

Some spear. I lifted it and squeezed my hand around it. The wider end was encircled by a band of brass while the pointy end was covered in black webbing. When I let go, a black handprint appeared on the wood and disappeared just as quickly. Maybe I should have taken the spear with me on our mission. Maybe then my heart wouldn't be so dark.

Two pieces of jewellery were in the box with the spear. I hadn't been able to bear wearing them. I couldn't be a queen while I wore Darragh's old medals and the locket my mother had given me. I opened the locket and gazed at the old picture of my brother and me. If he could only see me now. All my good intentions had been twisted into something dark and nasty.

I put on the necklaces and locked the spear away to keep it safe. How was I going to explain to Setanta that his mother was banished? The woman who had helped put me on the throne had thought nothing of murdering children to keep her son's prize. Maybe she had been following my lead. I felt ill. If I had been a better queen, none of those things would have happened. My mind was clearer than it had been in months. Things had to change. _I_ had to make them change.

Sighing, I picked my cloak up from where I had dropped it. My best times in the faery realm had always been when I was on a journey. And the last journey had been interesting. I smiled as I remembered MacKenzie's ridiculous proposal. And Yvette's— _the library_. I had half forgotten the scrap of paper I'd found there.

I read it again, a few random words about a golden mirror with a trapped reflection—something that had misled Sadler _and_ me and led us straight into a chaotic path. And I knew what I had to do to change that.

I left my bedroom and found a sledgehammer in one of the areas that was being repaired. I headed back up to the old treasure room in the tower. The mirror was there.

"You're the one that's poison," I whispered.

The reflection immediately shifted. It showed me a sinking boat, a drowning king, a bed full of blood, and—

I closed my eyes before it could show me any more death—before I grew foolish enough to be led astray again. I didn't need a manipulative mirror to tell me my future. I made my own future.

I hefted the sledgehammer as music from the party began, and I smashed the glass to pieces. With each strike, the mirror screamed in the voices of my friends, but I had no mercy. The mirror was darkness, and it had to die.

A god was next on my list.

# Introduction

Kings (Chaos #5.5)

* * *

By Claire Farrell

* * *

Set between books five and six in the Chaos series, Kings is a brief look into the lives of Drake and Brendan.

* * *

After sealing the rift, Drake hears word of his wife's sickness only to find that the cause is exactly what unites his enemies against him.

* * *

Brendan's journey across unexplored waters is only beginning, and if he finds what he's looking for, he'll owe a determined woman a throne by his side. But can he do it?

* * *

Whatever course of action is taken next, they _will_ change their world.
Copyright © Claire Farrell

Claire_farrell@live.ie

* * *

Cover by Yocla Designs

* * *

Licence Notes:

* * *

_All rights reserved. This eBook may not be re-sold_.

 Created with Vellum 

# Chapter 1

_B rendan_

* * *

The thrill of adventure combined with the beauty of an unfamiliar open sea was only marred by the sounds of Bran's violent retching over the side of the boat.

"Get it all up," Brendan said soothingly, trying his best not to sound amused.

"This is..." Bran gasped and looked up at his king. "This is _hell_. That madwoman has brought us straight to hell."

"Look on the bright side. Your face is so green you could be a mascot for our court."

Bran responded with a heave that turned even Brendan's stomach.

"I'll leave you to it." He patted Bran's back. "Try not to fall in."

Brendan strolled across the deck, the thrum of the sword of victory by his side. Whoever wielded the sword couldn't fail—as long as he were worthy of the honour. His human friend and Darksider queen had given it to him, even before she knew he would leave for unknown lands. She thought he was worthy. He couldn't let her down. Not on this journey.

The fae _never_ crossed the sea, and what lay beyond was a land they only knew from horror stories. Some terrible unnamed menace lived across the massive expanse of water, but it was also the possible location of the First Tree, the one object that might actually cleanse the realm before the blight swallowed them up completely. The land was dying, and a trip into unknown terrors was worth the risk to save the faery realm.

The wooden deck creaked underfoot as he walked, but the well-kept vessel appeared sturdy. Brendan found his way to the captain and navigator who had no problem steering the ship. In fact, none of the crew came across as anything but familiar with the boat. The only ones who looked uncomfortable were the group of soldiers from his own Green Court who had volunteered to accompany their king. Four young soldiers, plus Bran, were all he had taken with him. He was beginning to feel outnumbered.

"You look concerned," Yvette said, approaching him with her favourite woman before he could query the captain. Her bracelets jingled as she moved, yet she had managed to sneak up on him. _Again_. "You're not scared of a little water, are you?"

"On the contrary." He forced a smile to his lips. "I was thinking how safe I feel with your crew. You wouldn't know this was their first journey on water."

"Oh, we've used the ship as a fishing boat. We often transport supplies along our coastline. They're used to working together." She gestured around her. "This is just the next logical step, really."

"I wish my own men were as comfortable on water."

Her tinkling laugh set him on edge. "They have been poorly, haven't they? They'll recover as soon as we land."

"And then what will we find, I wonder?"

She sighed heavily. "I imagine we'll find a land full of people trying to survive, people fearful of what's on _our_ side of the water."

"The daoine sídhe were run out of that land. If even giants ran scared, I doubt we have anything back home scary enough for their concern."

"We do have a human queen," she murmured.

She gazed up at him from beneath long lavender eyelashes, ignoring his sharp, warning glance. Her thigh-length wavy hair matched, and her eyes were bluer than the ocean. Her voluptuous body was covered in tattoos designed to draw eyes to all the right places. And if he didn't marry her, then her family, her army, and her fortune would align themselves with his rival. Or maybe even his enemy.

She was exactly what his kingdom needed. But she wasn't what he wanted. It didn't matter now. He had a duty to his kingdom. He had let his subjects down the first time he was king. They were still suffering for his mistakes. He couldn't be selfish a second time.

"You must allow me a touch of jealousy." Her smirk couldn't hide a certain darkness behind her eyes as she reached out to touch his arm. Her long pointed fingernails were painted prettily, but they still reminded him of claws.

"You don't look like a woman who needs to be jealous of anything," he commented lightly and moved out of her reach.

She followed him to the rails. "We're going to be married, Brendan. We need one another. But we barely know each other, and you have such a close relationship with another woman. I'm afraid that people will talk after we're married if you spend so much time with the Darksider queen."

"Cara isn't a threat." He gripped the rails. What was it about women pushing the point when he clearly wanted to avoid the subject? "We will always be friends."

She gave a surprised laugh. "How naive you sound. Once we save the realm, the other courts will work against us. The Silver King and Chaos Queen share a child, you know."

He knew. And such a child—even her smile was capable of making the fae fawn over her. He had long sensed she was full to the brim with growing power that might one day be used against him. Despite that, he had fallen for the little girl. Scarlet had made him long to be a father, and that had been a shock. He had always imagined fatherhood to be a duty rather than a need. He just wasn't sure if it was the child or the mother who had changed his point of view. But it was far too late to ponder such things.

"Without my help, they _will_ encroach," Yvette continued. "It's only natural they would want their child to inherit the entire realm. We can't blame them. But we can't allow them an inch."

"That child is my named heir," he reminded her. "Scarlet is the one ensuring peace between the three of us."

She ducked under his arm and pressed her chest against his. His back stiffened at her touch. Yvette would be his duty. He couldn't imagine anything on the contrary.

"Perhaps our circumstances will have changed by the time we return," she said softly. "But be prepared for a fight. There's no knowing what Silver and Chaos will have gotten up to in our absence."

"Drake and Cara are my friends," he said.

"Of course they are. But they're also rulers. You yourself understand that the realm comes first. And your court would never understand if you made the wrong choice."

"I haven't—"

"You're used to being in charge, but have you ever managed to control the human? She'll never submit to you, you know. Never allow you to swallow up her court. Even if you somehow managed to get the blessing of the Green Court and the Darkside, it would never work. You both wish to take the lead. That could only end in disaster." She peeked over his arm and nodded at someone behind him. "Dinner is soon, my dear. You should join us. My girls are so bored that they've come up with a new dance to entertain you all with."

She walked away and left him there. She had picked at every fear and concern he had. Yes, he considered Drake and Cara his friends, and Scarlet, his heir. But how did they see him? Absence changed everything. Drake needed power to keep his court, and Cara... well, she was still a mystery to him. Every time he thought he had her figured out, she surprised him again. Yvette was right about one thing: Cara Kelly liked nothing better than having control over her own destiny. And there was no place for him in her life.

While he was on a dangerous journey to find the First Tree, Cara and Drake were on an impossible one, finding the elusive stone of destiny, yet another legendary treasure like his sword. The stone could theoretically seal the rift and stop the spread of the blight. The tree could cure the land. Together, they could save the realm. Together, they could reunite their old affections. Cara acted as though she were over Drake, but given enough time alone with him? He wasn't certain of the outcome.

He headed down to the kitchen where someone was playing a fiddle. He found Bran in the corner, sweating still as he nursed a bowl of clear broth. He sat next to his bodyguard, and friend, relieved to find a face he trusted.

"Still dying?" he remarked as someone set a bowl of stew in front of him. He tore a piece of bread from the plate in the centre of the table and dipped it into the gravy. At least Yvette had thought to take a decent cook along. Of course, it wouldn't be long until they were eating more fish than anything else, but he would enjoy the fresh meat and fruit while it lasted.

"Pretty much." Bran nodded at the women dancing on the other end of the room. "They don't seem affected at all."

"No, they look quite comfortable," Brendan admitted.

"I've never met fae like them," Bran said slowly. "I've no interest in women, you know that, but even I prefer the ones back home. Cara is a breath of fresh air in comparison to this constant... attention seeking."

Brendan's stomach curdled. His marriage would be entirely free of fresh air; that was almost certain. He frowned as he noticed his other soldiers, huddled in the corner, also looking green. The sea around Yvette's castle had been surprisingly calm. How could her people be so used to the rocking of real waves on the open sea? He had been forced to put himself and his people into the hands of a woman he barely knew; could he trust her? Could he truly rely on anyone? He glanced at Bran. Their numbers might have been small, but there _were_ those he trusted.

"Bran, no matter what happens, you have to make sure one of the First Trees makes it home again."

"Are you expecting trouble?"

"We're crossing the sea that nobody crosses," Brendan said with a laugh. "What better place to find trouble?" He looked up at his future wife and sighed. What better place indeed?

He dreamed. He was on a raft in the middle of the ocean, playing chess with a man. His opponent's chest was bare and heavily tanned. He almost looked human but for the larger black pupils in his sea-green eyes. His silver hair curled and met his elbows, and his muscles were tight and threaded with pulsing veins.

"You have a good stomach," the man said as he made a move. He was a stranger, but Brendan felt comfortable in his presence, almost as though he had known him once.

"I think the sword must be helping me." The familiarity of home surrounded him like a cloak. "I should be scared of all this water, but it's too... soothing."

"It won't stay that way."

A wave splashed over the side of the raft, wetting Brendan's bare feet. His toes curled from the frigid water. "This doesn't feel like a dream."

"Does it matter?"

Brendan laughed. "Likely not."

"Where are you going with the sword of victory?"

"To find something that will save the realm from the blight." He glanced around him, saddened at the thought of what could be. "One day, this will all be black and poisoned if I don't."

"Not all of it," the man said. "We made sure of that. It's a noble quest, all the same."

Brendan's hand lingered over the queen piece on the board. "Yes. Noble."

"How bad is the blight this time?"

"This time?"

"History has a habit of repeating itself."

Brendan watched the man make his next move. "It's not good. The Green Forest is dying. Landslides and sinkholes are showing up all over the place."

"Already," the man muttered as though to himself. "I thought for sure there would be more time." He met Brendan's curious gaze. "'Ware the shaking of the earth. That's when he starts to wake for good."

"Shaking of the earth? What do you—?"

"You entered my waters without permission, but you may pass."

Brendan woke with a start and ran his hands through his hair. Damp. He licked his lips and found they tasted of salt. He rolled over on a cot that was too small for him, but he couldn't fall back asleep, despite the gentle rocking of the boat.

He headed up to the top deck instead for some air. The boards were damp, the wind almost completely still. Yvette stood by the rails, mournfully gazing out at the water.

He joined her. She didn't seem surprised.

He inhaled deeply, the scent of brine filling his nostrils. "Are you up late or awake early?"

She shrugged, her face wan and peaky. "Up early. I had a dream about... well, a foretelling of my death."

"And was it a good death?"

She let her hair fall forward, covering her expression. "I was told I would die by the blade of my brother. I heard it once before, a long time ago. I didn't think I would hear it again."

"Well, then. If it hasn't come true by now, you must be safe."

"I made sure of that," she said so softly, he wasn't entirely sure she had spoken.

He gazed up at the sky. Dawn had yet to hit, and the sky was grey and lilac. He wished Cara could see it.

"Why are you awake?" Yvette asked. "Did you dream, too?"

"I think I dreamt of the god Manannán," he said.

She inhaled sharply. "Did you? And did he give you permission to pass?"

"Yes, actually." He looked down at her. "How did you know?"

"Manannán judges the travellers," she whispered. "He chooses if the way will be easy or difficult."

"The travellers? Because so many fae cross the sea?"

She faced front again. "I... read it in the book. Perhaps more fae crossed than we know."

"A book from your library," he said. "Cara seems to think there is a lot missing from your library."

"And yet I'm the only one in the realm capable of finding a book with images of the First Tree within. The library has been standing a long time. Of course things get lost. Cara seems to think that anyone who doesn't fall at her feet is your enemy." She glanced at him. "She's dangerous. I know you don't want to hear it, but she's a danger to our alliance."

"There's no danger," he said gruffly. That was a lie, and they both knew it. What would he do if Cara begged him not to marry Yvette?

"You know as well as I do that there will always be a danger there. If not your heart, then consider your life, Brendan. She's out of control. We all saw that at her ceremony; she lost herself to the magic completely, and everyone suffered. I've heard stories of her actions at court. She uses her emotions as a punishment. We can't fight against that. If her own actions don't kill her, then your affection will. I'll not be disrespected by either of you."

He glanced down at her, surprised by her fierceness. "Was it you then? At the ceremony. Did you do something to Cara that night?"

"I found out how dangerous she is," she said in a low voice. "And it's worse than I ever thought. You cry out against chaos, but what is more chaotic than that human?" She hesitated. "Haven't you ever considered the possibility that Chaos _wants_ her around? Sadler went after her for a reason. His god was never as strong until she showed up."

His fingers clenched into fists. "You will not repeat this, Yvette."

"Does she know how fearful you are on her behalf, I wonder?" She turned and laid her hand on his arm. "I have no quarrel with her as long as she doesn't interfere with us, but remember this, Brendan, you're the one with the power to make her my enemy. If you are weak, she will be the one who suffers for it."

He moved out of her reach, but it was too late. The cold was inside of him now, reliving the old fears. He had always been the most dangerous person in the realm when it came to Cara's life. And he had already been too reckless. As a youth, he had learned too late to respect the lives and hearts of humans. He had been paying for his mistakes ever since, and the last thing he could bear was Cara paying the punishment in his stead.

He couldn't face being alone with his thoughts, so he stood there in silence alongside a woman who could easily destroy every part of him. Dawn soon broke, the sky shedding its grey shroud in favour of pink and purple.

"We'll soon move into open sea," Yvette said.

He decided not to ask her how she knew that. He stared at the remains of land in the distance. They had been having a strange few days, partly why his soldiers were ill. One moment the way was calm and clear, the next, it grew stormy. And so it went. Interspersed with the weather, sections of land came and went, some he recognised, and some he didn't.

"That lighthouse," he said slowly. "Where is that?"

"It's the human realm," she said. "This is an intersection. Can't you feel how close the worlds are here?"

"We've been travelling in and out of realms?" he asked in wonder. He hadn't considered that possibility. "Without a portal?"

"The portal will come soon. Everything was connected, once."

"Until the gods interfered," Brendan said bitterly.

She glanced at him. "It wasn't just the human realm that was taken from you. Your... our realm was disconnected from everything. These intersections are the only remaining links beside the portals. Make the most of the view. This is the last time we'll see land for a long time."

"How do you know all of this?"

"I studied hard," she said sharply before leaving him there.

Disconcerted, he stared at the land in view. He had seen that lighthouse before, on a journey from the Fade. The Fade was a terrible place, a purgatory for trapped souls until they lost themselves and became monstrous shades. But Cara had done the unthinkable and rescued him, and on the way home, she had pointed out the human beach she used to visit.

But she had shown him the lighthouse from the cliff by the Hauntings. That meant he should be able to see the faery realm, too. But there was nothing, and soon, even the lighthouse seemed to recede. He kept watching, and as a cloud shifted, the shadow of the cliffs he sought out momentarily appeared. He squinted, trying his best to focus. The cliffs appeared then disappeared as though flashes of magic revealed the location.

His heart skittered. For a split second, he saw the cliff clearly, and the flutter of a black cloak above. As quickly as it appeared, it was gone, and no matter how much longer he watched, he saw no other sign of land. But he was almost certain he had seen something on the edge of the cliff, a figure soon shrouded in mist. Could it be have been Cara?

Of course not. How could it be? They couldn't have found the stone of destiny already. _Please let them find it_ , he prayed silently to Brighid, a god he had openly shunned. He prayed to her in moments of desperation on behalf of those he cared for, but never himself. _Please let them find the stone. And keep them safe. All of them_.

# Chapter 2

_D rake_

* * *

He pushed his horse as fast as it would go, travelling through an unwelcome forest to get to his sick wife. If she died, the balance of power shifted unfavourably. All would be lost.

And a piece of him—a piece he kept well buried—worried for her sake, too. She was his only companion, the only one who understood the pressure of running the Silver Court, the only one as tortured by fear as he. Too many in his court still thought in terms of Seelie versus Unseelie, of pain equalling power. Sorcha had been the one who caused pain in order to give _him_ power. He wasn't ready to give that up so soon.

After the joy of not only finding the stone of destiny, but using it to seal the rift in the Fade, being told of Sorcha's illness was the ultimate anti-climax. What was the point in saving the realm if he was going to lose his kingdom?

The daoine sídhe, Dymphna, rode behind him, the muscular brunette loyal in her concern. The messenger who had come to fetch him struggled to keep up. She quickly fell behind, her horse already exhausted from her search for her king.

Drake's horse skidded on a patch of soiled earth. He could have sworn the land had grown even more blackened since the last time he had passed that way.

His sole consolation was that he had found the stone. The rift was sealed. His side of the job was done. But did he have a court left? Banshees didn't fall ill... had Sorcha been poisoned? Attacked? The Silver Court was mysterious and secretive. It was likely his courtiers knew exactly what was wrong with Sorcha but hadn't allowed the messenger to tell him in front of Cara. Without Drake there, Sorcha obviously hadn't remained in control.

The twin castles rose up on the horizon. Two cliffs, two castles, and at one time, two queens. Twin sisters who had hated each other so much that they rarely met and conversed even less. They glared at each other, safe within the shelter of their castles, and waged a pathetic war using the weather as their weapons. Drake had born witness to their cruelty and foolishness during his vengeful search for his own father. Their people had suffered from the siblings' hatred, the fertile lands had been neglected, and the soil itself had been irrevocably changed.

Since then, the land had been rapidly eaten by the blight, and the fae had been forced to turn to the human realm to feed themselves. He'd been encouraged to go to great lengths to cover that particular fact when it came to many members of his own court who disdained humans but appreciated the show of deceit.

When he and Sorcha had made a pact to marry, they had each taken a castle for their own. The Silver Court appeared destined to repeat the same suffering until a bridge had been built between the castles. Slowly, husband and wife had moved everything to the larger of the two castles, but there was still a distance that could never be crossed. He could never _love_ Sorcha. And as it turned out, Cara, the mother of his only child, could never love him. He was cursed in every part of his life, fated to be miserable since the age of six when his faery father had murdered his human mother and taken him home to the realm of the fae.

As he neared the castle, he and Dymphna were greeted by a groom with fresh horses and water.

"Saw you coming," she explained. "Looked like you were in a hurry."

"What's happening?" Drake panted.

The groom shrugged. "Nobody's been told anything. The queen is locked in her chambers with some banshees and the daoine sídhe. Nobody else is allowed in. It's all quiet. The leanan sídhe has been holding court."

"Of course she has," Dymphna said, a deep frown creasing her broad forehead.

Donella was Cara's ancestor—and Drake's natural daughter's ancestor—who desired power above all else. Her alliance with him gave him much, but he feared for his life because of her, too.

"It's good to have our king back," the groom said, one of the few subjects who were open in their loyalty to Drake. She had once known the terror of serving the Seelie Queen and thought him an improvement.

"We should hurry," Dymphna said.

"You don't have to come with me," Drake said. "You must miss your daughter."

"With every fibre of my being," she admitted. "But Eithne is safe under Cara's care. Scarlet is, too," she said meaningfully. "When I know that you're safe, I'll leave again."

"Thank you," he said gratefully. He meant it. A daoine sídhe favoured by the other courts gave him an advantage. As long as he managed to keep her on his side. If Sorcha died, he lost the banshees. If Donella left, she would take half the court with her, and if Dymphna abandoned him, the rest of the daoine sídhe would likely follow. He had been playing a delicate game since his unlikely coronation—one that had primarily been a case of mistaken identity—and he wasn't sure when, if ever, that would change.

On fresh horses, they galloped the rest of the way to the castle. A lone banshee stood by the front doors. Like Sorcha, her banshee sisters were all beautiful but sullen, and he knew they were only loyal to him for the sake of power. They had risen with him. They all had to stay on top to survive.

"Take me to my wife," he called out as he dismounted and handed the reins to a groom. "I need to see the queen."

The banshee beckoned him to follow.

"What happened?" he asked. "What's going on?"

"You'll see," she said cryptically.

Dymphna followed him up stairwells and along corridors, ignoring fae who bowed as they passed, but the banshee made her wait outside Sorcha's quarters.

"I'll be right here," she told Drake.

He nodded and followed the banshee into his wife's quarters. Closed shutters sealed the room from the rest of the world, and the rich tapestries that hung along the walls had dulled in the darkness. Incense burned in every corner, but it couldn't hide the stuffy smell.

"What happened?" he demanded. "Tell me what's going on!"

" _She_ wants to tell you," the banshee said dully.

She lit a candle and handed it to him. The shadows danced around her face, reminding him she was of Death. His stomach twisted with unease as he took the candle.

He reluctantly moved to the bed and held the candle over his wife's form. He gasped in surprise. Sorcha's cheeks were raised in a rash of spots and pimples. Her eyes were closed, cupped with dark bags. Her lips were dried and cracked. Her hair was greasy, of all things. His normally beautiful wife looked extremely sick, and for the first time, a true flash of concern for something other than a loss of power reached him.

"Sorcha?" he said softly. "Sorcha, are you all right?"

Her eyes fluttered open. Her black eyes were filled with apprehension, but when she recognised him, she smiled. He took a step back, for it was her eyes that reminded him what she had made him lose in exchange for his crown.

Her face fell, and he forced himself to sit on the bed. "What did they do to you?"

"Nothing." She licked her lips. "Let us be alone."

"Water!" he shouted. "Get her some fresh water. Now!" His temper flared, the pain blinding him as he shouted at the banshees to get out.

He turned back to Sorcha when the room had emptied, but his rush of anger hadn't calmed.

She touched his cheek. "Red again," she whispered. "We mustn't let them see you like this, Drake."

He made an effort to shrug off the weight of fealty and calm down, just as she had taught him. He hadn't imagined the suffocation he would feel as king, the pressure and pain as powerful fae swore fealty to him. His skin seemed to stretch, almost as though the power would explode out of him, but his wife often assured him it was just his mind weakening, that he would grow strong enough to contain it all one day. Sorcha was the one who kept him sane when the darkness threatened to drown him.

He swallowed hard, pushing the panic to the back of his mind. "Tell me what's going on."

She reached for his hand and squeezed. "It happened. We're having a child. I'm... I'm giving you an heir."

He gasped as though the breath had been knocked out of him. They rarely shared a bed beyond the nights he suffered most, when she comforted him and hid his weaknesses from the court. "Are you... sure?"

Her expression softened, which was somehow even more bizarre than her appearance. " _Yes_."

"Then what is... this?" He gestured at her skeletal fingers. "They told me you were sick. You look ill, Sorcha."

"This is what happens when a banshee is pregnant." She tried to smile. "Don't worry. When it's over, this will end."

"The baby is poisoning you?"

"Something like that. I'm just very tired. I'm sorry. I tried to take care of everything, but I—"

"It's over. I'm back. You get rest and whatever else you need." But fear had taken him. She looked as though she were dying. He wasn't sure what he needed more: an heir or a queen.

"Did you do it?" she asked. "Did you use the stone of destiny?"

He nodded. "We did. It worked. The rift is sealed. The blight will surely end. And Brendan will bring back the First Tree and heal our soil. We're winning, Sorcha."

"He will," she said firmly. "He'll find it. He'll bring it back. We'll all be saved. You did it. You and Cara. I hated her, but she's saved us so many times."

"Hush. Don't think about that now. Sleep."

"Will you come back?" She sounded scared. "Will you visit me?"

"Of course." He tried to smile, and then he got out of that room as quickly as possible.

In his own quarters, Drake washed, ate, and then sat on his bed and tried to figure out how he felt. He let a flame flare in his hand, a foolish waste of finite magic, but releasing the power made him feel in control of it, let him focus the pain on something other than himself. Sometimes, it made him feel less alone. This time, it just wasn't enough.

He had a child with Cara, a beautiful child full of life whom he couldn't love because it would put a target on her back. A child with a banshee, on the other hand... He imagined his child growing up as sullen and apathetic as the other banshees and shuddered. How could he have fathered a child of death?

He pressed his fist against his mouth. Nothing had turned out as he wished. Nothing would ever go his way. He was cursed as a child of Deorad, the son of a depraved monster. The Chaos Court was full of his blood, of half-siblings and other relatives who hid their father's madness in their veins. Just like Drake. And yet his daughter appeared to be safer there than with him, he who needed a banshee to hide his inherited madness. What would Scarlet inherit?

_I've been alone most of my life_. He sucked in a breath as the air grew thin.

_I know nothing of being a father_. The skin on his fingers burned.

_Cara told me I'd move on with Sorcha_. He flexed his fingers.

_She doesn't care anymore_. Pain shot up his arms as he formed his hands into fists.

_She doesn't love_ —

His bedroom door burst open, startling him out of the episode.

Donella sashayed into the room. "Well, look who it is." Her eyes gleamed. "I couldn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes. You're back." She shut the door behind her. "You've heard the news, I take it. Your _wife_ is expecting a child."

He bristled, his heart racing. "How did you know?"

"Oh, you know how I am. Always hearing the juiciest gossip first. So you're having a banshee child."

"My _heir_." The word felt too big for his mouth.

"I didn't think her capable." She faced him, as smug as always. "You must be so... _proud_."

"Of course," he bit back.

Her eyes appeared to darken. "And did you succeed on your mission?"

"We did. Cara and me both."

"Of course _she_ was there. She gets her sticky little fingers into everything."

He frowned. "She's been essential to our plans."

She waved a hand. "She's the one who tore the rift open wide enough to quicken the blight in the first place. I wouldn't call that _essential_."

"If Cara hadn't gone into the Fade, you would still be stuck there. But enough about the past. All you need to know now is that the realm is on its way toward being healed."

She strode closer to him. "Are you sure?"

"The rift is sealed. We just need Brendan to return with the First Tree."

She waved a hand. "He's impossible to kill. He'll show up again, I'm sure. But that doesn't mean we can't play our advantages in his absence."

"Stop it." He turned away. Sometimes he hated Brendan, raged against him in Sorcha's presence, but they were connected. Harming Brendan would sever a piece of himself, too.

Donella wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned against his back. "You could have it all. The entire realm. Don't you want all of that power?"

_Yes_. No matter what he earned, it wasn't enough. He constantly longed for more—ached for it. With enough power, he wouldn't need to depend on alliances, wouldn't require the banshee to teach him anymore. None could touch him. He could control everything. But hadn't Brendan once thought the same? His soul had been trapped in the Fade instead. Drake could do with learning from Brendan's mistakes.

"Enough, Donella," he said with a sigh, pulling away from her grasp.

"Come," she traced her finger across the back of his neck. "Aren't you lonely after your journey? Perhaps Cara opened her legs for you, but don't mistake her. She's just waiting for Brendan to return. She used you to get to him. Everyone knows that."

All of the elements under the surface of his skin that he tried so hard to ignore pulled together, forcing him to suck in a breath just to steady himself. His sudden rage was so intense that he saw red spots in his vision.

He whirled around and faced her. "Don't you dare."

"Dare tell you the truth?" she said coquettishly. "The entire realm talks about how they spend their nights. After all, he's virile, a champion among men." Her gaze turned dark. "She's a mere human. From what I'm told, she's crawled after him since they met. And then there's the rumours about the child. She may have your eyes, but wasn't Brendan in control of your body when she was conceived?"

He pinched her shoulders and violently shook her. "Never speak of them!"

Her features creased with pain until he released her.

He had left finger marks on her beautiful shoulders. "I apologise," he said gruffly, forcing himself to swallow the blazing fire in his soul.

Donella's calculating smile returned as she ran her hand from his throat to his belt. "Don't you need some comfort?"

"With you?" he said with a sneer.

"Why not? You surely know by now that I offer a far more significant alliance than Sorcha or Cara. I have the power and the persuasion, the influence and the allies. I have what it takes to be a queen. Together, we can rule it all, take back what they took from you. They'll always call Brendan the true king if you don't stand up to him, and Cara? She stole the Darkside from right under your nose! You haven't yet recovered from that mistake."

He hadn't. He knew it. His shoulders slumped at the memory. If she had just trusted him...

"Drake, I can help you make it right. Nobody will rue the day we get rid of a banshee queen, and they'll all celebrate when I step into her shoes."

"You're stepping very close to the line of treason," he said sharply, partly because he was tempted by the easy path. But without Sorcha, he would lose all of the threads that kept him sane. Donella would cut them to gain an advantage.

She slid her dress off her shoulders. "I can look like _her_ if you want. I can wear her face whenever you want. But if you don't make a move soon, you'll lose everything I have to offer."

As he watched, she glamoured herself. Her face rippled, her hair deepened, even her skin darkened. And then it was Cara's face staring back at him, Cara barely holding her dress over her breasts.

"Don't," he said pleadingly. "Don't do that."

She moved closer. "It's all right. Everything will work out."

Gods, she even sounded like her. She ran her hands up through his hair and pulled him close for a deep, passionate kiss, even managing to mimic Cara's aura, that distinctive power that set him at ease whenever he touched her. It was a cruel joke, but his body reacted before he could think. He forgot everything else. He lifted her into his arms, relishing that scent that tortured him whenever she was in the same room. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he carried her to the bed, thinking of nothing but the peace he would feel once inside her. He tugged at her dress.

She broke away to help him release her corset, but she wore a smug, triumphant sneer that had no place on Cara's face. _Cara_ would never be his.

He finally broke free of the daze, terrified by Donella's strength. She could rule him if he let her. "Get out," he whispered, panting over her.

"What?"

He got off the bed and refused to look at her. "Get out!" he roared.

She reached for him, her self-control never faltering. She expelled desire that he wanted, that his brain tricked him into needing. But none of it was real. She was more dangerous than anyone. He shoved her away in a panic.

She fell back on the bed. "Oh," she said with a grin. "Is this how we play it?"

She slipped off the bed and crawled across the floor, her dress rustling as she moved. At his feet, she reached for his belt, still looking up at him with Cara's face.

He couldn't take a moment more. "Get away from me," he said weakly.

"You want me."

Even the sound of her voice was a lure he found hard to fight off. He fought through her magic, his anger building around him like a fortress. She touched him again.

He slapped her across the face without thinking. The sound echoed horrifyingly in the air. Looking as shocked he felt, she held her cheek, wearing her own face again, thank the gods.

"I warned you," he growled, reaching his limit. He roughly gripped her arm and pulled her to her feet. He held her steadily as he led her to the door. He yanked it open and shoved her outside. She tripped on her skirt and fell clumsily on the ground, revealing her breasts to everyone in the hallway.

"Never come to my room," he bellowed. "Not now, not ever, you disgusting little witch."

Her cheeks flooded with colour, and hate sparked within her eyes. She would never forget that indignity, he knew. And in that moment, he didn't care.

"Have some pride," he said scornfully. "If you think I can be tempted by a glamour, you're more foolish than you look."

He turned on his heel and slammed his bedroom door behind him. He laid his back against the door and breathed deeply. He had just made a powerful enemy.

# Chapter 3

_B rendan_

* * *

Brendan mentally cursed Cara for putting her paranoia into his head. She hadn't trusted Yvette, and now he found it impossible to do otherwise. He watched Yvette's crew closely. Nobody could gain that much experience from sailing on the coastline. Not to sail on open waters so well. Then what was he accusing them of? Nothing, he decided. It was worry, a constant whirring of anxious thoughts, that made such ideas stick. The same self-preservation that had once caused him to make drastic mistakes in the name of _what if_.

The air had been growing warmer for days. The sun reflected off the calm ocean like a mirror. The back of his neck burned, the skin on his nose peeled, and sweat glistened his arms. If this kept up, he wouldn't be capable of staying above deck.

He waved over one of his soldiers, the eldest of the group. "Where's Bran?"

Pól nodded in the opposite direction. "Hiding out." He laid a hand on his stomach. "Do you think we'll be on this vessel for much longer?"

"I've no idea," Brendan said. "What made you volunteer for this, Pól? Momentary madness or needing to run from something?"

"I could ask you the same question," Pól said with a grin. "Restlessness, perhaps. It's been a while since I left home, and I'm tired of the speculation back at court."

"About our chances of success?"

Pól smiled wryly. "More like Yvette's chances of success."

"Ah."

"We need an heir that doesn't belong to another court." Pól dropped his gaze. "I apologise, I—"

Brendan clapped his hand on the man's shoulder. "Don't worry about it. You're just saying what everyone is thinking. But we've bigger concerns right now. There won't be any courts if we're not successful."

Pól straightened. "We're all agreed, my lord. We'll do whatever it takes to succeed."

"Thank you," Brendan said.

He left Pól and found Bran in a shaded corner of the deck, the man looking as though he were trying not to breathe too deeply. To Brendan's amusement, Bran's periwinkle colouring was slowly transforming to green.

They had been on the boat for almost two weeks, and they hadn't seen land in at least five days. It was hard to keep count sometimes. Nobody apart from his own men seemed concerned. He sat next to Bran who grimaced.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Like death."

"You haven't thrown up in two days. That must mean you're getting used to all of this."

"I'm supposed to be your bodyguard," Bran said glumly. "I haven't done an awful lot of guarding."

"There's little to guard me from at the moment," Brendan said confidently. "Besides, when we land you'll likely have to do your fair share of fighting."

"We both know I'm just for show," Bran said. "You're more than capable of defending yourself. Cara was right. You should never have brought me here. I'm useless."

"Nonsense," the king said. "That woman is just protective of her favourites. You don't know how good it is to have a friendly face with me. There are few people I can trust, but I believe you're one of them."

"I'm no Arlen." Bran grinned, a glimpse of his old, light-hearted self peeking through the green tinge. "I can't imagine him throwing up."

Brendan smiled back. "You'd be surprised. Why did _you_ decide to come, Bran? You know I would have left you behind if that was what you wanted."

Bran stared at his hands. They were cracked and dry from the constant spray of sea water in the air. "If we don't bring home the First Tree, everyone we care about will die. Cara would have come if you'd let her. Even Grim and little Realtín, too. It's just... the right thing to do."

"But don't you remember the days when fae never concerned themselves with the right thing to do?" Brendan asked.

"And look at how bad things got. You weren't there, Brendan. You don't understand what it was like when the Seelie and Unseelie Queens ruled. They were awful." Bran shrugged. "Times have changed. We're all better now."

"Why is that, I wonder?"

The young bodyguard met his gaze. "You know quite well why. A human came and changed us."

"Bent us to her will, more like," Brendan said.

Bran gave him a sly look. "Some of us were very willing victims, weren't we?"

"We must have been if we were so easy to change." Even miserable with sickness, Bran could hit the point. "At least you're no longer afraid to speak to me."

"I've seen the great and terrible king berated by a human," Bran said frankly. "You're not the cold-hearted man from the stories I grew up hearing."

"I hardly remember him myself," Brendan said, his hand moving to his chest as though to cradle the ache there. "But I remember enough to wonder why the gods gave me this second chance."

"You were a young king," Bran said loyally. "You were given that gift too soon, and you had a lot to learn. You've learned your lessons the hard way. From adversity grows greatness."

"I'm not a great man," Brendan said. "I thought I was, once, and by the time I realised the truth, I had slid too far to fix it all. And I tried. Nobody remembers that, but I did try. It was like scooping up water with a sieve and far too late besides."

"You're fixing it now." Bran gathered his knees to his chest. "You won't be remembered for your mistakes."

"I hope you're right." Brendan glanced at his friend. "But I don't think mistakes should be forgotten. May some other leader learn from my errors in judgement before he makes his own."

They sat there in companionable silence as the heat grew intolerable. They could have sought shelter below deck, but that place felt like a hole underground compared to everything else. Brendan didn't want to feel trapped anymore. The pair watched as some of the crew pulled in a small net of fish from the sea. The fish were puny, but they dashed their tails and flopped their bodies, desperate to live.

"If we don't find land soon, we'll be living solely on those things," Bran said, wrinkling his nose in distaste. "I eat fish even in my dreams."

"At least we won't starve," Brendan said. "Dying of thirst might be unpleasant though."

"There's a storm coming," Bran said. "Can't you feel it? The heat will break, and rain will come, and we'll survive a while longer."

Brendan didn't say what they were likely both thinking: the storm might best the ship altogether.

The air grew heavy, clinging to their skins, and Bran's stomach turned again.

"Come on." Brendan helped him to his feet. "Let's go watch the sea."

They stumbled over to the rails where Bran looked even greener, but he didn't throw up. The waves lashed against the boat a little harder than usual, sending frothy spray right up to their faces.

"At least it's cool," Bran said.

"Oh, is he sick again?" Yvette's bracelets jangled as she joined them. "It's a shame."

"You've had no problems then," Bran muttered.

"Good breeding." She smiled across the water than frowned. "What in the heavens is that?"

They followed her gaze. There were dark spots in the water moving incredibly fast parallel to the boat.

"Something's out there," she exclaimed.

Brendan sensed the fear in her voice. "A fish, perhaps," he said reassuringly.

"So large?"

Something burst from the water and sailed in an arc before going under the surface again.

"Not something. Some _one_. Lots of them," Bran said, sounding amazed.

What had broken through the water had been a water fae, scaled and shining and naked.

"Why are they following us?" Yvette said anxiously. "What do they want?"

"Are you all right?" Brendan asked politely.

"What if Manannán sent them?" she said. "What if they're here to stop us from passing?"

"Why would a god send them to stop us?" Brendan asked, keeping a close eye on Yvette's reactions.

"Manannán didn't send them," Bran said. "Cara did." He waved at the water fae and cried out a greeting. A hand reached up from the water to wave back.

Brendan relaxed. "So she did."

Yvette turned on her heel. "I'm tired. I'm going to rest in my cabin."

She stalked off without another word.

"She seemed terrified," Bran said.

Brendan could only agree. "And these water fae won't approach us."

Their oceanic guardians never came close, merely swam close by for a few more hours, but then it was as though they had crossed some invisible line. The water fae hung back and watched their boat leave.

"I'm sorry to lose them." Bran looked up to the heavens and laughed as a great drop of water landed on his face. "It's raining!"

The rain was hot and heavy, quickly drenching the deck. Brendan's concern grew as the sky darkened.

"We should take cover," he said, but he lingered nonetheless.

He and Bran watched in awe as the first crack of lightning appeared to break the sky, quickly followed by the rumbling of thunder. The crew were terrified, muttering of omens and bad luck.

"If they're nervous, I'm petrified," Bran admitted.

"It's a little disconcerting," Brendan said in agreement. "Even the air smells different now. This is going to be a big storm."

A massive wave rose up and crashed against the boat so fiercely it almost sent both of them over the rails.

"We need to go below now." Bran escorted his king, positioning his body as though to shield Brendan.

They slowly moved across the deck as the ship tried to unbalance them time and time again. The rain dashed against them, making it hard to see. The sky frequently lit up with lightning, the storm growing closer by the second.

A loud crack sounded. "Watch out!" somebody shouted.

Bran shoved Brendan aside with great force. The king slid across the deck, safely out of the way as a mast broke and fell. Bran's swift action put himself in the way of the fall. He was struck squarely on the head and landed flat on the deck, witless. Brendan scrambled back to him. Bran lay there, his face so pale that the blood on his temple looked stark and terrifying.

"No, no, no." Brendan heaved the mast off Bran. "Someone help me!" he cried. He couldn't let the boy die. Not now, after everything they had been through. The boy had to see what was across the sea first.

Pól rushed over and helped Brendan lift the massive piece of wood while a second Green Court soldier dragged Bran free. Brendan dropped the mast and knelt by Bran, struggling to stay by his side as the boat rocked incessantly. The storm wasn't showing any sign of lessening.

"Get inside," he told his soldiers.

"Not without you," Pól said. "We came to find you. We need to stick together. Now more than ever."

"Bran, wake up!" Brendan slapped the boy's cheeks, but there was no response. He hefted Bran into his arms and carried him toward shelter, struggling to stay on his feet. His soldiers offered to take his load, but he was the one responsible. Bran had only been hurt trying to save his king.

The water and the wind combated against him, but he finally made it inside. He brought Bran to his own cabin. The rest of his soldiers gathered into the room, all of them concerned. Bran was well liked amongst them.

Brendan lay Bran on his own bed. The boy didn't stir, but he still breathed. One of Yvette's women came to help.

Yvette herself huddled in the doorway, her hair wet and stuck to her head.

"We'll make it through this," Brendan said to reassure her.

She nodded fervently and tried on a weak smile.

Brendan turned to Bran, but the boy still wasn't responding. Brendan's gut twisted at the thoughts of losing him for good.

# Chapter 4

_D rake_

* * *

From an engraved silver throne, Drake gazed out at his court, at the narrowed eyes and whispering mouths, the changes in disposition and favour. The mood had changed in the castle, and he had never felt so alone. The fae had once concealed their contempt—sniggered behind their hands, perhaps—but lately, the ill feeling had simmered to the surface.

It was all so frustrating. He had closed the rift. Surely they all should be grateful. But Donella was slowly poisoning his court against him, and he was too scared to send her away. He lived in fear on a daily basis, a fear of the fae turning on him, of others taking his power from him.

Sorcha had done her best to hide her pregnancy from Donella, but the leanan sídhe had spies everywhere. Everyone knew by now, knew that time was running out to remove him from his throne. An heir would strengthen his position, turn some of his opposition back to his side. If Donella was smart, she would kill Sorcha before his wife gave birth, and that was why only the banshees were allowed to feed her in case of poisoning. He wouldn't sleep until the child was born.

A number of fae knelt before his throne, backs bent over in supplication as they tried to persuade him they weren't responsible for destroying a painting of himself and his wife. He hated that painting, despised the regal and haughty expression he held in it, but it stood for something. The fact his subjects dared to defile it was a worrying sign. Brendan's subjects would never have dared, and that burned more than the act itself.

Drake made a show of relaxing in his throne, keeping his expression as blank as possible while those before him babbled about their innocence. It didn't matter who did it; somebody would be made an example of. That was the only way, whether he liked it or not.

"Fine," he said at last, finally prepared to lose yet another piece of his soul. "If none of the suspects admit to the crime, we'll just have to kill all of their families to ensure the culprit is punished."

A murmur ran around the court. The hall was stark and cold, always cold. At nights, Drake warmed his hands over the fire in his room for a long time to push the chill out of his bones. He had never been less comfortable, and he could never show that kind of weakness. His court was made of ice, and it wouldn't do for him to act as though his heart was any warmer.

"Wait," an old man cried out. "I... I did it. It was me. Please spare the families."

Drake was sure the old man wasn't the culprit. He was just too old to maintain the cold exterior the rest of the court worked so hard on. But he didn't have the energy to investigate.

"And we have a winner," he said. "Hang the old man at noon tomorrow. Tie him to the gallows today so he can get a good view of his impending death." Drake stood. "Court dismissed."

He strode out of the hall with Dymphna, willing his hands to remain steady. An old man would die to save his family, and the fae would be cowed for a few moments longer. And every day, the stakes grew a little higher; as did the price he paid.

"He's old," Dymphna said loyally. "He is a willing sacrifice."

"But a sacrifice all the same." He glanced at her. She knew what he gave to his wife and her god, yet she never judged him harshly. Freeing her had earned him a lifetime of her loyalty.

"You need to get rid of the leanan sídhe," she warned under her breath when they were out of hearing distance of the crowd of fae who were still hanging around the doors of the Great Hall.

"And you know I can't. At least, not yet." He sighed. "I'm going to check on Sorcha."

"Is she still ill?"

"She says it's normal, but I... I don't know."

Dymphna flashed him a sympathetic glance. "I'm sure she'll be fine. I should congratulate you."

"For fathering another child?" he asked sharply then deflated. "I apologise. I haven't been in the best mood of late, I know."

"We should be celebrating," she said. "You did it. You sealed the rift and made headway on saving the realm. These people have no idea how lucky they are. They have the leader they need."

Or the one they deserved. Many of them were as cruel and insane as the queens they had once served. "As long as they look out the window and see evidence of the blight, it will mean nothing. Brendan will be the one who cleanses the land. He'll be the hero, yet again."

"If they wanted him to rule over them, they would be part of the Green Court," Dymphna said.

Except they thought of the Green king as weak, susceptible to the faults of humans. Drake, on the other hand, had set aside a human to be a leader. If only they knew...

Dymphna sent a questioning servant packing as they strode up the stairs together, instinctively seeing that he wasn't ready to deal with the court so soon after sentencing a man to death.

Drake trusted her. He had helped her out of a hopeless situation, been part of the process to reunite her with her daughter, and even helped repair her relationship with the other daoine sídhe after she left them for a human. His mad grandfather had murdered her beloved husband, and yet Dymphna was the only person in court completely on his side. Apart from Sorcha, he conceded. No matter what he had thought of the banshee when they married, she had been by his side through everything. She had shown she was made of more than her heritage. Just like him.

He hesitated at a narrow window to look at the sea. It crashed against the rocks as though trying to destroy them in a rage. He had never seen the water calm or gentle, and now the foam was tinged with black, a sign the blight had reached the water. How could anyone sail across the sea and survive?

"If Brendan doesn't return, there will be an awkward period," he said.

"Scarlet is still his heir. She'll technically inherit the Green Court."

"My illegitimate daughter will have more power than I do." Drake shook his head. "Fate does like to twist and bend what we think will come next."

"Better Scarlet than someone like Sadler or Donella," Dymphna said. "Cara is too sentimental to allow Scarlet to be your enemy. Donella would encourage it."

"Don't make too big an enemy of her," Drake warned.

"Anyone who aligns themselves to you is Donella's enemy," Dymphna said. "Surely you've noticed the whispers."

That he had. Donella had refused to attend court since he humiliated her. She was likely spending every waking moment turning his court against him, one fae at a time, and there was little he could do about it. He had too few allies, too little control over the power of the court. He hadn't learned to wield his magic to harm others and control it at the same time. He was effectively powerless, maintaining an image as a cold, cruel ruler to quiet the rumours.

"Perhaps if you rewarded the loyal subjects rather than punishing the rest..."

Drake bit his lip. "I must be seen to be consistent."

"Then perhaps it's time to make use of your close connections to other courts," she said meaningfully.

"I'm not using Scarlet and Cara," he said firmly. "Not for this."

"Donella's supporters wouldn't dare overthrow you. Not if they were sure the Chaos court wouldn't respond in kind. Your daughter is related to Donella. If even her own family aren't on her side, then it would speak volumes to the people here."

"It's too risky. Donella may be related to Cara, but I haven't even claimed Scarlet as my own."

She glanced at him. "Maybe it's time you did."

"I can't risk her. You know that better than anyone."

Dymphna was the only one he confided in about Scarlet. She herself knew what it was to decide between love and strength. Not even Cara understood the extent of his regret and pain over his lack of a relationship with his firstborn. He had never desired a child, and he had watched his mother die because she wanted to keep him. "If my enemies targeted her to punish me, I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

"One day, she's going to wonder why. Even if Cara didn't tell her the truth about her father, someone in the realm would. She'll come to you someday and ask you to explain yourself."

"Perhaps by then, the realm will have changed." Telling his firstborn why he had never been a father to her was something he had nightmares about. He could only attempt to protect her from afar and hope that her mother loved her enough to make him obsolete.

They finally reached Sorcha's doors. Drake swallowed hard. Somebody had drawn a red X on the door.

Dymphna ran her finger through the substance then sniffed it. "Blood."

"Set some of the daoine sídhe to guard Sorcha at all times," he said gruffly.

"I can take care of that myself if you wish."

"No." He shook his head. "I need you with me."

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to quash whatever this is as soon as possible." His hands curled into fists. "They dare. They actually dare." He punched the wall and swore loudly. After everything he had worked for, everything he had sacrificed, he was about to lose it all because he had scorned a woman who was more powerful than he dared suspect. He had to deal with her. Somehow, he had to get rid of her without being dragged down by the consequences.

"Drake." Dymphna's voice brought him back to earth, tethering him to his body. "This might not mean anything."

"And if it does?"

"Then we'll face it together. I came here to help, and I will." She glanced at the blood and sighed. "I'll organise a permanent guard right away." She left him abruptly, and for an instant, he felt completely alone—and more importantly, vulnerable.

How dare they take so much from him? His home, his security, and curse the gods, even his soul. The highs weren't worth the lows. He seethed, sick of second-guessing himself, of being "managed" by the women in his life. _He_ was the king. He deserved respect. Consumed with the thoughts in his head, the ones that lovingly whispered to him that death was the answer, he fought a war with himself in the hallway before storming into his wife's bedchamber.

"Why is it so dark in here?" he demanded of a banshee standing in the corner. "Why is there no life?"

He strode to Sorcha's bed. She was watching him with wide eyes. She looked worse than ever. The thread holding his sanity together tautened, close to snapping.

"Get my wife fresh water," he commanded. "And fruit. Lots of fresh fruit. Force her to eat if she refuses."

"Drake," she said softly.

"No." He pointed at her, pretending to himself that his hand wasn't trembling. " _No_. You can't carry a child if you're as weak as a babe yourself."

"Calm yourself," she whispered. "Eyes are always watching." She took his other hand and uncurled the fist. His fingernails had pricked the skin, leaving bloody crescents behind. "Oh, Drake."

He moved to the window and yanked the curtains open. "Let there be light," he said shakily.

The light cut through the darkness in the room, and he wished he hadn't done it because now he saw clearly the true extent of Sorcha's condition. She looked as though she were dying, and as often as she reassured him, nothing could persuade him that it was normal.

Death terrified him. Since the day he witnessed his mother take her last breath, the thought of getting close to someone crippled him because he imagined their deaths. As soon as he felt himself falling for Cara, the nightmares had started and never stopped. Death by drowning, an arrow through the heart, a slit throat, pushed out of an ivory tower, poison. That one had only been the last to almost come true. He had taken the poison himself instead. But Cara hadn't been the one by his side, nursing him back to health. He had almost died for her, and she had sought comfort elsewhere.

And as distant as he forced himself to remain from Scarlet, he often dreamt of her being suffocated in her cot. There was no way around it. Love and affection weakened him. He had to do better, gain power, and become more like the king his court really needed.

"Did something happen?" Sorcha asked.

He shook his head. "I ordered an innocent man to death, and then there was... It doesn't matter now."

"It is I who need death," she said softly. "You only order men to death to sustain me, to feed _me_ , to give me strength. This is my death, not yours."

He looked at Sorcha, his sin-eater, and wondered how he would exist without her to take responsibility for his burdens and guilt.

He faced the window to avoid looking at how haggard the banshee had grown. But something grabbed his attention, someone approaching the castle. A large, bulky faery horse. _Dubh_. Did that mean...?

His heart jumped in his chest. Had Cara come to him? Right when he needed her? But no. He deflated. The queen of the Chaos Court would hardly be riding alone into strange territory. It was a messenger. Important, no doubt, if they arrived on Dubh.

"I must go," he said. "Stay well."

He left the room and met Dymphna in the hallway. Two tall, muscular daoine sídhe were now stationed outside his wife's room. One less thing to worry about.

"Dubh is on his way," he told Dymphna. "Let's take a look at my room before going to see what the message is."

"Do you think it's trouble?" Dymphna asked worriedly.

"Likely so. Why else would she send Dubh?"

They strode quickly down the hallway to the quarters he now lived in. He and Sorcha had slowly moved closer together, a literal sign of their relationship transforming into a shaky friendship.

"I'm worried about Sorcha," he admitted as they walked. "She doesn't look well."

"When I was pregnant with Eithne, I spent three months throwing up everything that passed my lips," she said. "And remember how Cara would weaken and faint?"

He nodded, but Cara had been capable of riding a horse at the time. Sorcha couldn't lift up her head without help.

They reached his room and stared at the red X on his door, too.

"Bastards," he murmured.

He caught hold of a passing servant. She shivered in his grip, her eyes darting in every direction but the door.

"Clean this mess up," he commanded. "And let it be known that someone will lose their hands for this."

Subdued, she nodded and ran when Drake let go of her arm.

"Come on," he said with a heavy sigh. "Let's go see what went wrong this time."

News had apparently travelled fast. Whispers followed the pair wherever they walked, and Drake couldn't be sure if it was the messenger, the bloody X's, or the pregnancy rumours that had his court in such a tizzy.

A group of fae, servants and nobles alike, had gathered outside. Drake and Dymphna bypassed the crowd. He ignored the fawning and the cold stares alike to stand apart. More of the daoine sídhe blocked him from the crowd as if by magic. It was slowly occurring to him that he took charge of very little in his own court. The commands were known and accepted, and he never had to say a word. Initially, he had thought it a sign of his power, but now he wondered if he were being managed instead. Perhaps that was how he had ended up with bloody warnings on his bedroom door.

Dubh finally came to a stop before them, the black faery horse's muscular body sweating from the vigorous run.

A short, squat, wrinkled old woman with blue eyes hopped off the horse's back and heaved a weary sigh. "These journeys are so uncomfortable," the Miacha said, one of many near-identical healer sisters.

"What's happened?" Dymphna asked.

"Does Cara need help?" Drake said.

Blue Eyes blinked a couple of times in confusion. "Well, no. She's in good health."

"Then why are you here?"

The Miacha looked surprised. "Was she wrong?"

" _Who_?" Drake asked through gritted teeth. Why wouldn't the woman just spit out why she had arrived?

"Cara sent me." The Miacha began to unload her bags from Dubh who stamped his feet crossly.

"Somebody take care of the horse," Drake commanded. "Carefully. He bites."

A groom approached warily, but Dubh behaved as he was led away. When they were out of sight, the groom screamed with pain. Some things never changed.

Drake tried again with the old woman. "Why did Cara send you?"

The Miacha's eyes narrowed as she focused on him. He shifted uncomfortably under her gaze before repeating his question.

Blue Eyes scratched her chin. "Why, for the baby, of course! There _is_ a baby, isn't there?"

His stomach bottomed out. Cara knew. Drake glared at Dymphna. "Did you tell her? Did you actually go behind my back and send word to Cara about Sorcha? Damnit, Dymphna. I wanted to tell her myself."

"Me? Of course I didn't. I wouldn't do that. Maybe rumours spread to her from the court. You know the fae here are wondering about Sorcha's illness."

"Oh, I doubt anybody told her," Blue Eyes said. "Cara knew Sorcha was sick, and she sent Dubh to us with a message saying that she suspected Sorcha was with child, and if so, she needed the best of care."

Drake couldn't have been more astonished if she had spat in his eyes. "You're telling me that Cara somehow guessed my wife is with child and sent you here to help?"

"Exactly," Blue Eyes said brightly. "Don't worry. I'm good with children. I helped Cara give birth, after all. We decided I was the best candidate. I have herbs and potions with me, probably too many, but you can never be too careful. Now I've never been a midwife to a banshee before," she prattled, patting his arm. "But I'm confident that this will be like any other delivery."

"She's... she's not ready to deliver yet."

"Good," Blue Eyes said. "It'll give me more time to settle in and help her."

"You don't understand," Drake said. "She's very sick."

"Oh, never mind that. Men always think pregnancy is an illness."

"In this case," Dymphna said, "I think he's right. She does seem to be quite unwell."

For the first time, the Miacha faltered. "Well, then." She raised herself up to her full height. "It's a good thing I'm here, isn't it?" She frowned at the astonished Silver King. "Now, now. Hurry up. Show me the queen. We need to get started."

And the king swallowed hard, pushing the bubbling emotions back in their places. Cara hadn't come, but she had sent something even better in her place.

# Chapter 5

_B rendan_

* * *

Bran's eyes fluttered open two days later.

"Well, it's about time," Brendan said lightly, gesturing to one of the soldiers at the door to go fetch fresh water. He had been truly concerned, but he didn't want Bran to worry unnecessarily.

Bran tried to sit up, blanched, and then fell back against the pillow. He attempted to speak, but couldn't, so Brendan bade him to be silent. When the soldier returned, Brendan made Bran drink some honey and water. Bran spluttered his way through the first sip then drank deeply until Brendan took the fluids away.

"I'll bring you some clear soup soon," Brendan said to fill the silence.

Bran rested his head on the pillow, looking exhausted. "Where am I?" he asked after a few minutes.

"My cabin."

"Your bed?" Bran's eyes widened, and he tried to get up.

"Don't be foolish," Brendan said. "You saved my life, Bran. The least I can do is let you sleep in a better cabin."

"I don't remember what happened," Bran admitted.

The king joined his hands, twining his fingers as if holding his strength together. "There was a terrible storm. I thought we would be lost at sea. A mast cracked and fell. You were hit in the head pushing me out of the way. Enough of the heroics, Bran. You've been in here for two days. On the plus side, you haven't thrown up."

"I'm feeling better," Bran said. "Any sign of... anything?"

"Not yet. Soon though. I'm sure it'll be soon."

He _hoped_. He was tired of the boat, of the motion, of the taste of salt on his lips. Exhausted by Yvette's constant hints. It wasn't right to marry yet, not on such a journey. Not when... He knew he was making excuses. He knew it, but he didn't care. He had goodbyes to say before he finally agreed to Yvette's requests.

His kingdom expected a sacrifice, desperately needed one to feel safe, and he was the only person who could give it them. It was his duty. But that didn't mean he couldn't hold off for as long as possible. It didn't mean he couldn't find a sliver of joy first. His shoulders slumped. Cara would hate him if he married, even if she didn't mean to. She couldn't be friends with Yvette, and he would be as miserable as Drake. When had he become so morose?

The soldier at the door cleared her throat. "Shall I fetch him the broth? Saves you..."

She didn't have to finish the sentence. Even his soldiers sensed his willingness to avoid Yvette.

"Please," he said.

When she returned, he took the bowl and allowed the younger fae a few mouthfuls. "We don't want to overdo it."

Bran yawned loudly, his periwinkle veins fading slightly. Unlike some fae, Bran freely displayed his wings. They stretched out beneath him like a halo. As a child, Brendan had wished to know what it was like to have wings. After a number of months in Drake's body, he could safely say he never wanted to go back.

"Get some rest."

"I've been asleep for two days."

"That was healing. Now it's time for resting. Listen to your king, boy."

Bran obediently closed his eyes. Soon, his breathing slowed.

Brendan left him to go to the upper deck for some air. He stalked the deck, growing more restless by the second. He needed a release. He needed to hunt, to kill, to do _something_.

"You look stressed," Yvette said from over his shoulder. "Is Bran still unwell?"

Brendan stifled a groan. He realised there was a limited amount of space on the boat, but the woman showed up everywhere he turned.

"He's improving." He forced himself to smile when he turned to face her. She was perfectly pleasant, beautiful to look at, and rarely argumentative, so what was his problem?

"I know how you feel," she said, making him flinch. "I'm restless, too."

He laughed. "I admit, I could do with a decent hunt on a good horse. I miss steady land, and the Great Forest, and... so many other things."

"We'll find land soon. From the stories, the daoine sídhe who fled were in a smaller boat than this. They couldn't have made it much farther."

He gazed out at the sea. Unless the storm had blown them far away from land. He fought off that thought. The last thing his soldiers needed was his pessimism to bring them down.

"Well." Yvette gently touched his chin to make him look at her. The heat in her eyes likely matched his own. "There's plenty of entertainment for you here, too. Just follow me to my room and see."

He watched her leave. He was tempted. It was a couple of years of stress that he needed to work off. He ran his hands across his face. If he had any sense, he would follow Yvette and play nice. If he had any sense, he would never have had a _human_ in his company long enough to—

A shout from the crow's nest drew his attention upward.

"Land ahoy!" the sailor cried out joyfully.

Brendan's legs weakened. They had made it. Finally, they had crossed the treacherous sea.

It took another two days to reach land. Brendan, accompanied by Bran and the four volunteers, gathered at the stern and watched as the island grew before them.

One of the soldiers, a petite female named Alyss was trembling. "I never thought I'd see it," she said. "My grandfather died wishing he could cross the sea, and now I've done it."

"Do you think we'll find what we're looking for?" Bran asked.

"We must hope," Brendan said. "Are you up for an adventure, Bran?"

"Always," Bran said resolutely.

As they neared the shore, he turned and called out to Yvette. "I'll go first, taking three of my people with me. I think the rest of you should stay in the boat while we investigate."

"If you think that's best," Yvette said.

That surprised him. She had been so focused on getting across the sea that she had bribed him with the boat, and now she was satisfied with remaining behind. It made little sense.

"Bran, Pól, Alyss... with me. Take as few supplies as we can manage. We want to travel light." The trio ran to prepare. "Be ready for anything," Brendan murmured to the two soldiers left behind. "Stay constantly alert." He hesitated. "Trust no one."

The pair nodded faithfully.

When the others returned, Brendan said, "We have no idea what's out there, but it was enough to drive the daoine sídhe away, and they're _our_ giants. We all need to be careful."

Yvette called for the ship to be anchored at an excessively long distance from the island.

"Here?" Brendan said in surprise.

"Oh, maybe I just want to see you work your way across," Yvette said. "We don't want to get too close to the island. It could be rocky under the surface of the water. The last thing we need is for the ship to sink."

Brendan and his soldiers hefted their supplies onto their backs and waited while the ship was anchored. Yvette stood by Brendan's side as her crew released a small rowing boat that had been strapped to the side of the ship.

" _That's_ what came to mind when you told me you had a boat," Brendan said to fill the silence between them.

She rested her hand on her hip. "That little thing. I don't do things by halves."

He rolled his shoulders as a cold feeling crept up his spine. Everything sounded ominous to him of late. He had to blame the lack of dry land. He touched the sword of victory before leading his soldiers onto the rowing boat.

He and Pól took the oars. The group moved quickly through meek waves.

"It looks beautiful here," Alyss said, dipping her hand into the lapping waves. "Nothing like the sea at home."

Brendan didn't disagree. The sea was aquamarine, the beach full of soft golden sand. Beyond that was a vibrant forest in every hue of green. At least they would have cover.

They came to shore and left the rowing boat wedged in the sand.

"It's so good to be on land again," Brendan said with a grin as he stretched his long arms. "And now for our next adventure, we should—"

A strange sound echoed right before a massive boulder hit the sand next to their rowing boat.

Stunned, the soldiers gaped at the oversized projectile until Brendan gathered his wits and commanded them all to run for the trees. A second boulder landed, this time in the water.

"The ship!" Bran cried. "They're trying to destroy the ship!"

"If they succeed, we'll never get home." Brendan knew how vital it was that they returned. "Go!" he shouted at the ship. All four of them waved and gestured for the ship to move. The anchor had already been raised, Brendan realised. The ship moved out of reach of the third boulder just in time. A howl of rage sounded in the distance.

Another boulder crashed against the rowing boat, effectively destroying it. Brendan looked away, unable to watch.

The group hid amongst the trees in silence lest there was an army hidden in the midst of the forest. No more boulders were flung, but the ship was already out of sight.

"There goes our way home," Alyss said mournfully.

"Good thing the ship was so far from shore," Pól said.

"Good thing?" Alyss's voice trembled. "We're _stuck_ here."

"We're not stuck," Brendan said firmly. "They won't abandon us." He hoped. "There won't be anything to go home to if we don't succeed. We must find the First Tree, and we must bring it home, even if we have to build our own bloody boat, or everyone we know and care about is lost." He gazed out at the boulders. "And I don't want to stay here a moment longer than we have to."

"We not even sure what the First Tree looks like," she protested.

"We've all seen the images from Yvette's book," Brendan said. "We cannot fail now, no matter what kind of monsters we encounter here."

The ground shuddered. Brendan felt it under his feet.

"What was that?" Bran hissed.

The vibrations increased, accompanied by other unrecognisable sounds.

"Whatever it is, it's coming this way," Alyss said.

"It almost sounds like trees being uprooted," Pól said, barely containing his horror.

"This way," came an unfamiliar voice from above. "Quickly, before you're seen."

Brendan looked up. It took him a second, but he found a figure hunched on a branch, every inch of their skin painted with mud. The stranger leapt in front of them, tall, but feminine. She beckoned them to follow, then took off in a sprint.

Brendan looked at his doubtful soldiers, then shrugged his acceptance.

"Come on," he commanded. "I'd rather take my chances with this one over whatever's behind us."

They raced after the camouflaged woman, struggling to keep up. A number of times, Brendan lost sight of the person leading them—his gaze skating over the green and brown amongst the foliage—but she would reappear if they fell behind.

The shuddering underfoot soon lessened, and Brendan wondered what had caused it. But he felt alive, running through that strange forest on solid ground.

They finally left the safety of the trees and quickly crossed an overgrown meadow. The grass was waist-high, even for Brendan, who was well over six foot tall. Alyss, barely over five foot, struggled until Brendan jokingly offered to carry her on his shoulders. She determinedly pushed through the grass after that, gaining on the men.

The group ran down a slanted patch of land, and then their leader vanished, disappearing right in front of their eyes. The four of them came to a stop, panting.

"Where did he go?" Pól said.

_"She_." The woman popped up from what must have been a secret hole in the ground. She grinned, and her teeth flashed white. "Follow me."

"To where?" Bran asked.

"The mounds," she said as though he were foolish. "We're going underground to see my people." She shook her head as she gazed at them. "It's been a long time since we saw anyone like you all. I saw your ship. That surely means only one thing." She disappeared again.

"Wait!" Brendan cried, too late. Had she been expecting them?

His soldiers investigated the secret entrance. "There's a long tunnel here!"

Bran looked at Brendan. "What are you thinking?"

"We don't have a choice. Whoever lives here will know more about the boulders and the First Tree. Maybe they'll give us a map of the island. We've lost the ship for now, but we still need to continue with our mission."

They all agreed. Brendan made to enter the tunnel first, but Bran got in the way. "I'll go first," the boy said so firmly that Brendan didn't have the heart to stop him.

Bran jumped down, followed by Brendan once the boy shouted up that he was okay. The tunnel was part of the earth. Brendan imagined forgotten fae digging into the dirt to escape... what, exactly?

For a time, the tunnel was so dark that they were forced to use their hands to feel their way. The earthen walls were moist at first, but the farther they travelled, the drier the dirt became. It smelled old and dead, but it was still healthier than the soil back home.

As the tunnel widened, flickering torches appeared, giving them some light. The tunnel itself was long and winding; they passed by a number of sections that had apparently collapsed.

"Not feeling so safe right now," Bran said shakily.

"Come on!" a shadowy figure shouted from ahead, her voice echoing. The tunnel veered right then split. The strange woman waved her hand then ducked into the left fork.

Instinctively, they all increased their speed. They ran through the tunnel, past the fork, and took another couple of turns before they were finally able to stop. What they saw made them all gasp.

Underground, in the... _mound_ was a village of sorts.

"What is this place?" Bran asked, looking about him in wonder.

Pillars—both stone and wooden—and planks of wood kept the earth above their heads from falling in. The curved walls were plainly carved out of stone.

"It was a quarry once," the woman said, hopping from one foot to the other. She was absolutely filthy. Her hair had been braided back and covered with mud. Even her fingernails were completely darkened by dirt. "I'll take you to the elder. You can tell her everything. Hurry!"

As they walked between huts, people peeped outside to stare at them. The place wasn't lit by torches, likely because of all the wood, but rather, little glass jars full of fireflies were hung in every possible location—over doorways, from planks of wood, even their path was marked with jars.

"This is so strange," Bran whispered under his breath, awe glittering in his eyes. "It's like a dream."

They slowly followed after the girl until they reached the largest home at the far end of the little community. The girl was beside herself with excitement. She urged them inside the home made of stone. Inside was one large but stuffy living space with a makeshift fireplace, and a fire. Smoke moved through pipes upward, likely outside.

Despite all of the wood outside, there was none in the home. A pile of mattresses made up a bed against one wall. There were no chairs or tables. Every possession was laid out on the floor.

An old woman sat on a rug before the fire, grinding herbs in a stone bowl. The back of her bald head was covered in tattooed marks that Brendan couldn't begin to decipher. She looked up, entirely unsurprised by their presence.

"Finally." She set down the bowl and stood. She was almost as tall as Brendan. "They sent you."

Brendan frowned, too confused to reply.

The woman continued. "You're here to defeat the Fir Bolg for good, aren't you?"

"Fir Bolg?" He shook his head. "No, we're here for the First Tree."

The woman glanced at the girl who had led them there. "Eira, these are the people from the ship?"

"Yes," Eira said. "The ship left because the giants flung rocks. These are the only ones who came ashore."

"And they're so small." The old woman sounded disappointed. "Too small to be our kin." Her eyes lingered on Brendan. "But I was so sure."

"Dafina, is it really true?" Eira asked in dismay. "Are these not the ones?"

"Who were you expecting?" Bran asked.

The old woman, Dafina, sat and picked up her bowl again. "Many generations ago, some of our ancestors left to find aid. The rest of us were driven underground."

"By these Fir Bolg?" Brendan asked.

She blinked in surprise. "Where are you from that you know not of the Fir Bolg?"

"Across the sea," he said. "Where are we? There's a blight in our land. We heard of a tree that might help us cleanse the earth."

"They're talking about _our_ trees," Eira said. "They are, aren't they?"

"Perhaps," Dafina replied.

Brendan looked at the elder woman. " _Your_ trees?"

"The _Crann Bheatha_ ," Eira said dreamily.

"The Tree of Life." The old woman pressed her lips together so tightly that they disappeared completely. "Perhaps you should tell us your story."

"Only if you'll tell us yours," Brendan said quickly.

She allowed him a smile.

"Are you daoine sídhe?" Bran asked.

Dafina exchanged a surprised glance with Eira. "You know of _us_?"

"Daoine sídhe fled to our land a long time ago, running from beings they described as giants. Nobody's crossed the sea between our lands since," Brendan said. "Where are we?"

"This is Banba. You don't look Formorian, so you're not from Ériu. That's the closest land to us."

"They must be from Inis Fáil," the girl said enthusiastically. "It's real, Dafina!"

"It was once known by that name," Brendan said, "until the land was divided by Brighid."

"Brighid escaped the mad god?" The old woman brightened. "Then it's not too late."

_Escaped_?

"Who are you waiting for exactly?" Brendan asked.

"Our history is long and tragic," she said. "The Fir Bolg were the last to come to destroy us. We couldn't defeat the giants, and most of our gods had already retreated to the Otherworld. We followed the gods known as Tuatha de Danann, and you must, too, if you know of Brighid, for she is our Danu's granddaughter. We tend the trees you seek with the _uisce bheatha_ , the water of life, and we worship the crows who protect our fate."

That caught Brendan's attention. "Crows? Why?"

"The crows are a sign that we are not truly lost. As long as they remain, we know that one day, Badb will return to defeat the Fir Bolg for good."

"Badb?" A shiver ran down Brendan's spine. "The warrior queen? That's who you are waiting for?"

"Yes. When she reaches her true potential, she will be known as the Morrigan, and when she has been resurrected three times, she will be accepted into Mag Mell as her reward."

"What's Mag Mell?" Alyss asked.

Eira pursed her lips. "They know so little."

"Mag Mell is the Delightful Plain," Dafina explained. "It's the true afterlife for those deserving, where heroes and gods alike roam in splendour and contentment."

Brendan felt ill. The Darksiders called Cara Badb. And if two different lands had stories of her...

Bran opened his mouth, his eyes bright with excitement. Brendan nudged him and gave a brief shake of his head. Nobody could connect Cara to these people's problems.

"You say there is a blight on your land," the old woman said, her eyes narrowing. "What caused it?"

"We're not completely sure," Brendan admitted. "We thought it was from a rift in the Fade, but there's evidence that a god came into play, that perhaps this happened before, and our people allowed themselves to forget."

"Ériu had a blight," Eira said. She had knelt by the old woman to help her grind her herbs. The people who had watched them from their huts had all been dirty, but the old woman was spotless.

"It did," Dafina said. "But the Formorians who caused it were banished. Perhaps they found a way to your land. When Brighid didn't return from her final great journey, we thought her lost."

Brendan's stomach twisted. These people seemed to be closer to the gods than his own had ever been. What journeys had Brighid gone on?

"In our land, the daoine sídhe are champions," Bran said. "We're kind of surprised that anything could defeat your people."

"We are strong, yes, warriors, yes, but long wars dwindled our numbers, and the giants are no easy foe. It will take great magic and sacrifice to defeat those creatures. They are only concerned with destruction." She gazed at Brendan. "You have noble blood. You could be one of our own."

"My mother's line shares daoine sídhe blood," Brendan said.

"He's a king," Bran said proudly.

"But not _the_ king," Brendan added with a smile.

"You have the look of a god about you," the old woman said wistfully. "For an instant, I thought you were a child of Danu reborn. The gods will one day return. I hope I am alive to see it." She bit her lip. "But perhaps my true journey lies elsewhere. You seek the trees?"

"Yes, we need them to cleanse the blight from the land. It's unusable until we do," Brendan explained. "The blight has destroyed our land, and children afflicted with this taint turn into deformed things."

Eira spat on the floor. _"Formorians_."

The elder woman patted her arm. "Not necessarily." She nodded at Brendan. "We will give you some of the trees, enable you to take them with you should your ship return."

"You would let them take the trees?" the young girl said, aghast.

"If they can reach them, they deserve to take them. Perhaps this is part of the true path, my dear."

"We don't want to take all of your trees," Brendan said. "Just enough to heal our land."

"I will agree to this as long as you permit me to go with the trees. I will tend to them in your land as I have in mine."

"You want to come with us?" Brendan glanced at the others. "Our land is dying. We might be too late, even if the ship returns for us."

"I'm willing to take that chance. I wish to find out what became of our ancestors. Our histories need to be reconnected. So much has obviously been lost over the years. We have books, old stories, lore, predictions. I can take many useful items with me."

"We do need information," Bran said. "Especially after Yvette's library turned out to be a complete bust."

"Where are the trees?" Brendan asked.

"Too far for you to find alone," the old woman said. "And you'll need our help distracting the giants." She waved a hand. "But you've come a long way. You'll want to eat and rest. In the morning, you can tell us your decision."

Thanking the old woman, Brendan followed the young girl out if the hut.

"You'll have to split up," Eira said.

"We'd rather stay together," Brendan said.

She tutted. "There's no room big enough."

"Then we'll sleep outside or above ground," Brendan said.

"I'll figure something out," she said grumpily.

"I'm sorry we're not who you were expecting," Brendan added, sensing the source of her disgruntlement.

She shrugged. "I suppose it's not your fault."

She led them in the direction of a delicious scent. A man was standing on top of one of the huts, using a cooking apparatus that was partly through the ground.

"Food for another four," she called out. "We have visitors."

He looked down at them all. "Are they...?"

"No. They're not. But they're staying here tonight. Where shall I put them? They refuse to split up."

"They can have my place," he said. "It'll be a tight squeeze, but they're small."

Brendan bristled. He was at least as tall as the man on the hut.

"Thank you," she said. "Follow me," she added gruffly to Brendan and his men.

They followed her to a stone hut. "It's so strange, being part of the earth like this," Bran said, touching the wall.

The girl looked surprised. "You don't live like this."

"People generally live above ground where we're from," Brendan said.

"We live in a castle," Bran boasted.

The girl's eyes lit up. "A real castle? I thought they were just in stories. You must tell me about it. I'll get your food. Wait... wait there."

She ran off.

"She seems hyper," Bran said.

"She's young," Alyss said. "Poor thing was probably born underground."

"Are you really thinking of taking that woman with us?" Pól said doubtfully. "We can't trust them."

"We can't trust anyone but ourselves," Brendan said. "But sometimes, we have to have a little faith. We don't know this land, and that woman had a lot of information."

"They worship _crows_ ," Pól said with a snort. "They're either crazy or foolish." He glanced around the small room. "I'd say both if they choose to live like this."

"They don't choose it," Brendan said. "You saw those boulders like the rest of us. Whatever threw them was powerful, more powerful than us. And we're desperate for those trees. If it takes a new travelling companion, then that's a tiny price to pay."

"What if it's not the right tree?" Alyss asked.

"They know about blights," Brendan said. "They knew exactly what we meant by a tree that could cleanse the earth."

"The Darkside is full of crows," Bran said slowly. "Do you think—?"

"No," Brendan said firmly. "These people have stories, that's all. It's fancy and legend, nothing at all to do with anyone back home."

"What if the ship doesn't come back?" Bran asked.

Brendan made an effort to look relaxed. "Then we'll build our own ship."

Bran laughed. "I have no ship building skills, I'm afraid."

"These people sent their ancestors off in a boat. If they're so knowledgeable, then I'm sure they still have some shipwright skills."

"You never give up," Pól said in awe. "Sometimes I feel as though you can do anything."

Brendan unsheathed his sword and held it up. It gleamed green. "This was a gift from the Chaos Queen. It's one of the legendary treasures."

"The sword of victory," Alyss whispered.

"Exactly," Brendan said. "Whoever wields the sword of victory can never fail. We have this on our side. We've already beaten the odds just by arriving here. We've made peace with the indigenous race who are willing to give us the trees."

Pól looked terrified. "But—"

Brendan made sure his smile was full of confidence. "I escaped from the Fade twice. We're in possession of legendary treasures. We were _meant_ to succeed."

And as he gazed back at those trusting faces, he prayed he wasn't leading them to their deaths. He gripped the sword a little tighter. They needed a big victory if they were to save everyone back home.

# Chapter 6

_D rake_

* * *

A sharp rap at his bedroom door disturbed Drake from his breakfast. He wiped his mouth, dropped the napkin on the plate, then answered the door. A servant he had noticed being enthralled by Donella's stories on more than one occasion stood at the door, his red-rimmed eyes insolent and sullen.

His slouched stance immediately sent Drake on edge. "Did you want something?" he barked.

"You're wanted by that healer." The servant sniffed. "It's _important_."

"Get back to work," Drake snapped, slamming the door shut. He had only spoken to the Miacha earlier that morning. If Blue Eyes wanted to see him again already, it had to mean bad news.

He strapped a sword to his waist and hid daggers in a number of places. The casual clothing styles worn in the other courts were more comfortable, but the pretentious, formal modes of dress his court preferred made it easier for him to conceal his weapons. His hand hovered over a dagger; easier for an assassin, too.

Fully armed, he left his room to visit his wife's quarters in the next hallway.

He nodded at his male bodyguard, a large daoine sídhe whom Dymphna enthusiastically vouched for. Dymphna herself had vowed to spend as long as it took looking for the culprit. Painting a bloody X on the bedroom door of one's sovereign wasn't a pledge of loyalty. Drake sighed as he realised he would have to put yet another subject to death. Perhaps the sacrifice would give Sorcha some vitality. He could have sworn her eyes looked brighter after the old man was hanged two weeks previously.

The halls were conspicuously empty. The absence of staff made Drake nervous. He changed his mind, instead intending to make one other stop before he reached Sorcha's quarters. He hesitated outside Donella's room. The smart choice would be to bed her and convince her of his loyalty to her. The smart choice would be to allow her to remove Sorcha so she could step into the queen's throne, and he would keep his own.

He had never been smart.

He didn't knock. He violently pushed open the door. Donella, sitting at a dressing table in just a corset, turned to look at him. Her hands were stained as she smeared crimson liquid from a jug onto her skin.

Shocked, he almost took a step back. "Is that _blood_?"

She gestured toward the jug. "Is Sorcha in need of a skincare treatment?"

"Sorcha doesn't need anything you're selling."

She let out a scoffing laugh and turned back to her mirror. "That's not what I hear."

"Maybe stop listening to gossip and start considering your precarious position in his court," he said coldly. "If there's one more incident, you're gone, Donella. I won't tolerate anything else from you."

"You'd banish me?" Her voice was mocking. "Whatever would my friends do?" She turned in her seat and sucked her thumb clean. "I suppose they could always come with me."

"Last chance," he spat before leaving and slamming the door behind him. Dealing with Donella left his skin crawling on a regular basis. And his daughter was descended from her line. That was about as worrying as Scarlet being descended from his own demented father.

He strode angrily toward his wife's quarters, wishing he had never stopped by Donella's room at all. Blue Eyes was waiting for him outside Sorcha's room, politely chatting to the broad daoine sídhe guarding the door until she noticed the king approach.

She took him aside. "We must speak," she whispered urgently. "Time is of the essence."

"What is it? Is she ailing still?"

Blue Eyes gazed up at him as if judging him. "I've already spoken to her about this, but I feel compelled to speak to you, too."

"Well? What is it?" His anxiety burned in his throat like bile. What was going on?

"This pregnancy is not safe for Sorcha," the woman said. "This castle isn't safe either, for that matter. There's no fire in her room, and the food that arrives for her is unappetising at best. She needs better care than this, Drake."

"I understand." He bit down on his fury.

"You should send her to one of the other courts," she began.

"No," he snapped. "I can take care of my own wife. I'll do something about the servants."

She hesitated. "Even that may not be enough. Her body is rejecting this pregnancy."

"The baby?"

"The baby is surviving, but that's the problem. It's time to consider ending this pregnancy."

His fingers curled into fists. "End it? Did _she_ suggest this?" He knew that sacrificing royal blood gave great power, but he didn't think she would stoop so low as to destroy her own child for it.

"No. In fact, she's refusing to end the pregnancy. Even if she survives, she will be weakened for a long time. She may never recover. I'm asking you to persuade her to stop this before it's too late. I'm very concerned."

"But what's the problem?" Cara hadn't had problems with Scarlet, and she was human. Surely a fae, a follower of a god, would be stronger.

"She's a banshee. She stands for death. She's not supposed to give life. Not like this."

"I don't understand."

"Then maybe you should discuss this with her." She glanced at the daoine sídhe. "Are all of these bodyguards truly necessary?"

"Yes," he said firmly. "And I'd advise you not to wander the castle alone either. This is a bad time."

"I see." She shook her head. "It's of no matter. I'll stay in her quarters and make sure she's being cared for properly. The other banshees don't appear to be very... caring, do they? You could send for Anya. She may be a pixie, but she has experience with—"

"No," he said abruptly. He didn't want news of Sorcha's illness to spread any farther than it already had.

"Will you at least speak to Sorcha?"

"I will," he said. "Immediately."

"Good. I'll busy myself getting the fire going." She reached up to pat his arm. "We'll save her."

If Sorcha died, he would be free. And what would happen then? He thought of Cara and Scarlet, of joining two courts to make one large, strong kingdom. And then he remembered bloody X's and shuddered. He could never bring Scarlet or her mother near the place. Not like that.

And without Sorcha, he would be lost. She helped him when the pressure of the fae depending on him grew too heavy. She took his sins and made them hers to lighten his load. Only she understood the toll the crown was taking on him. A solitary half-breed was never meant to hold so much power. So why wasn't Cara suffering, too?

He went inside and almost recoiled. The room smelled fetid. He moved to the darkened windows and pulled open the curtains. The banshees kept closing them, preferring to keep the room stuffy and dark. He pushed the windows wide open then went to a set of drawers to find an extra blanket for Sorcha.

Three banshees looked on disapprovingly. He ignored them and the pair of daoine sídhe standing on the inside of the door. Sorcha was awake, watching him with dull eyes. He pulled the extra blanket over her, making sure she was warm, but the tips of her fingers looked blue and lifeless.

"The Miacha spoke to me."

To his surprise, Sorcha set her jaw stubbornly and tried to roll over.

"Stop," he said, gently preventing her from turning away. "We should at least talk about this."

"Not in front of them all," she murmured.

Understanding, he sent everyone outside the room. "Now, we're alone. We can speak freely."

"Then tell me what's going on. Why are the daoine sídhe always here?"

"Because I don't trust Donella," he admitted. "I embarrassed her, and she somehow knows about the baby. I think it's best if we take precautions until she calms down."

"What happened?" She squeezed her eyes shut. "No, I don't want to know." A tear dripped from the corner of one eye and ran down the side of her face and behind her ear.

"Nothing happened," he said, worried. She rarely showed such emotion, even when they were alone. "And Donella's not important. The Miacha believes you should end the pregnancy, Sorcha."

"She's wrong," Sorcha said.

He barely recognised her. Not because of her appearance, but because of how defensive she was of the pregnancy.

"You don't have anything to prove," he said.

"I'm not trying to. I just believe that the child will be born safely."

"At a cost to you."

"I don't care. This child _will_ be born."

"But it's a risk to you," he said. "Don't you understand?"

"You'll be free of me then," she said, pouting like a child.

"Stop that."

"I don't want to let go of this," she admitted. "It's a boy, Drake. A son. That's why it's so much trouble for me. Banshees only ever birth daughters."

A boy. What kind of son could he raise? "Then a daughter may come in the future. End this before it's too late."

"No," she said stubbornly.

"I don't understand why. Children are distasteful to you."

"Other people's children are distasteful," she said coldly. "I can feel this one, and it's changing me. I don't know why, but there's something about being linked to another being by blood, a being who doesn't know anything about power or loyalty. It just _is_. It's alive. It's... different. He's _ours_."

"Would a sacrifice help you?" he asked.

"I don't want Death near him," she said, sounding panicky.

"I don't understand you anymore," he said. "Are you _trying_ to be contrary?"

She stared upward then finally nodded. "A sacrifice may help me. Death will boost me, but it may not last long."

"Good," he said. "I need you back on your feet before Donella causes even more damage." He cleared his throat. "I'll leave you be."

She gripped his hand before he could walk away. "Can't you love me? Even a little? Can't you want me to live because you can't bear the thought of me dead?"

He flinched. She had never spoken those words before. He could even imagine that she still detested him. Not anymore. Not when she spoke like that.

"Don't," he said. "You knew my heart was already taken when we made a deal to marry."

"Was it?" Her voice grew unsteady. "Or are you just saying that to give yourself an excuse to shut yourself off?"

He met her gaze. "You understood how it had to be. Besides, husbands and wives who love one another don't make good kings and queens. You're the one who told me that."

"I didn't force you to marry me," she whispered.

"You may as well have," he said bitterly. "I warned you that I wouldn't let you forget the things you had done."

"Accept your side," she said. "I _know_ you. I see through you. You sent Cara away because you feared you had already lost her to Brendan. You wanted him to lose, to punish them both because you saw how they were together. You knew you couldn't compete."

"Stop it."

"We all saw her falling for him. You couldn't bear to watch her love him, so you sent her from everything she wanted. I'm not the cruel one here. I'm not—"

He made a sound of disgust and tried to leave, but she clung on to him, desperation in her eyes.

"Drake, _please_. I'm the one who gave you everything I had. I haven't given up on you once. I saw something in you, a strength Brendan didn't possess, and I... And _Cara_... Everyone knows _she's_ moved on. Why can't you?"

"I said, stop!" he bellowed, his voice full of pain and rage.

She shrank back against her pillow, dropping his hand. "All right."

He felt disgusting, like a monster, an animal, but he walked away and left her there anyway. "Get back inside," he ordered the group who were waiting patiently beyond the door. "You," he said, addressing his bodyguard. "It's time for court. Be on your guard."

And as he walked away, he fervently prayed for his fingers to stop trembling.

The court was full. It seemed as though everyone in the castle had bundled into that one, large hall to watch him avoid glancing at the empty throne on the other side of the room. He and his wife had begun their marriage divided, and the entire court had followed suit. Even now, pressed against each wall, two factions grew apparent.

Gathered on his side of the room were the daoine sídhe in their suits of armour and the banshees with their displeasing pallor and dark clothes. There were other fae with him, most of them dressed in poor fabrics closer to modern human styles. Those fae were loyal to him for other reasons. Many had once been solitary and craved to be part of something that was led by a man who knew what it was like to be alone. _King of the Underdogs_.

The other side of the room was filled with Donella's supporters, most of whom were wealthy and noble. Some were more open with their affection than others. Many were genuinely in awe of her. She was cruel and ruthless, but she knew how to charm them. And he saw his own daughter doing the same with her people. What kind of adult would she be? His throat ached.

He needed to oust the leanan sídhe from his court for good. Some of his people would leave with Donella, certainly. But others were only concerned with power. Surely, if she were banished, they would fight amongst themselves to take her place. He released a sigh of relief. He was doing the right thing. Donella had spent her time at court undermining the queen while flirting with the king. He had only tolerated her for so long because she brought many nobles with her. He had reached his limits months ago.

He tried to concentrate on the problems his court brought to his feet, tried to keep his temper even and his judgements fair, but all he could think about was Donella's bloody face and the way Sorcha had looked when she asked him to love her. It was impossible. Love had no place in the games kings played. The women were foolish to think otherwise. Even Brendan was going to marry that awful woman, Yvette, for her army. And one day, the Darksiders would push Cara into a marriage she didn't want, too. It was their way, and nothing could change that now.

How foolish he had been, grabbing the opportunity to steal a kingdom with both hands, thinking it would solve all of his problems. Reality had quickly set in, sweeping away his precious ideals. Sorcha had taught him how to hold on to his court, but even she hadn't realised how dangerous their lives would become.

The doors burst open, and Dymphna strode in, hauling a pleading servant behind her. Five daoine sídhe followed, keeping wary eyes on the whispering crowd. The tension thickened, and Drake shifted uncomfortably in his seat, trying to watch every faction at once.

Dymphna dumped the fae at Drake's feet. "This is the one who dared defile the doors of this castle. This is the one." She spoke loudly, kicking the fae at her final word. She made the fae stand. "He claims to have worked alone."

"Of course he does," Drake murmured. He gazed down at the servant and recognised the same sullen eyes he had witnessed only that morning. "You again. Kneel."

"No," the man said loudly.

"Kneel for your king." Dymphna kicked the back of the man's knee so that he collapsed to the ground.

He spat on the floor. "That's what I think of your king." He jumped to his feet, his eyes wild, and his voice excited. "I refuse to accept the authority of a king who stole the crown. I swear fealty to a true noble, Donella, the leanan sídhe, creator of the royal bloodline that rules the Darkside!"

The room fell silent. A trickle of sweat ran down Drake's back. So this was it. This was her play. Instead of leaving and taking half his court with her, she was simply going to take his court and his throne from him.

Donella tittered, looking completely relaxed in her seat. "Me? Why, I'm flattered. It's true I'm related to the Chaos queen, and also the heir of the Green Court."

"Do you think Cara lays claim to you?" Drake scoffed. "Do you think my daughter will ever view you as a relative?"

"Your daughter? I don't remember you making a claim on any child. It is the Green and Chaos Courts who are entwined. And I can easily link the Silver Court to their great reigns."

"You can do nothing," he said loudly. "Take the culprit before me to my wife's quarters to be sacrificed for his crimes of treason."

"Treason?" Donella stood. "Didn't you hear him? He doesn't accept you as king. He sees _me_ as his queen, and he hasn't acted treasonously toward me. In fact, I'm sure he's not the only one with the same view."

Drake rose to his feet, a reaction to the movement in the room. The crowd had clearly divided and taken their sides. All of the daoine sídhe unsheathed their swords as one and surrounded him in a protective shield. Many voices near Donella proclaimed her to be the true queen. Too many.

"Death to the pretenders on the throne!" somebody screamed.

Drake drew his weapon amidst cries of protest and accusation. His court had turned on itself because of that woman, that evil leanan sídhe.

"Calm them," Drake commanded. "Stop them from fighting." If the fae lost control, only senseless deaths would occur.

"Let them kill each other," a banshee called out. "It will strengthen Sorcha."

Drake hesitated long enough for the condemned man to jump up and attack him with a small blade he had hidden in his clothes. Dymphna cut through him before Drake could even raise his weapon. First blood had spilled, and that was a signal to all.

The crowds surged toward each other, filling the room with sounds of clashing swords and cries of pain. The stench of death. Drake held his sword, momentarily shocked. The entire court had been more prepared for civil war than the king.

Drake caught sight of Donella across the room, a wide smile across her face as she observed the chaos before her.

"I'll kill her," he spat, and he lunged toward the fighting crowd to reach the leanan sídhe.

Dymphna got in his way. "You cannot. Any blade could kill you before you ever reach her."

"Then I'll die fighting," he snarled.

_"Think_. Sorcha needs us. She's the weaker link. Donella could be using this distraction to end the banshee before she can bear you an heir."

Drake swallowed his rage long enough to see sense. "Daoine sídhe, with me to protect the queen."

Dymphna stayed by his side as her people fought a path to the doors. But the fighting wasn't just going on in the great hall. The stairs were full of warring fae, disgruntled servants sneakily attacking loyal subjects in the midst of the mayhem.

Drake stepped over dead fae who had obviously been on the wrong side. Enemies came from every hallway, splitting up the soldiers, and leaving them all weakened.

"There's too many of them," Drake said as he ran his sword through an unfamiliar faery who had charged at him.

"We need to get upstairs," Dymphna said, shepherding him toward the nearest staircase.

Drake fought his way up a flight of stairs, Dymphna at his back. Most of the daoine sídhe who had accompanied them were stuck on the bottom step, surrounded by foes.

"We should help them," Drake said.

"They're warriors. They will survive. We must reach the queen's quarters." Dympha shook Drake. "If she dies, this is over, Drake. Hurry!"

Forgetting he was a king, he followed her in the race to reach the queen. Along the way, they rescued a number of soldiers who gratefully accompanied them the rest of the way.

"If we reach the queen's room, we can bottle-neck the corridors and stairs and keep the floor contained," he said.

"Drake, I sent for help," Dymphna called out as they defended against yet another attack. Donella had been more successful at persuading his people to turn against him than he thought.

"What are you talking about?" he shouted, raising his sword to meet an assassin's blade. He knew the woman. She smiled at him every day. He had no regrets as he plunged his blade through her heart.

"I knew you wouldn't, but I felt uneasy when I knew that Donella had discovered the pregnancy, so I sent word to the other courts."

"Why?" he demanded angrily as they pushed on. "You make us look weak, Dymphna."

"We _are_ weak! We're in the worst position possible. The king is running through the castle, fighting off his staff, in order to save his queen. This isn't how it should be."

He leaned against a wall during the momentary reprieve. "Did you receive a reply?"

"I fear I sent the messages too late," she said. "It'll be days at least before any help arrives."

His stomach sank. He couldn't hold off Donella's followers for days.

They finally reached Sorcha's level. To his horror, there were bodies everywhere. The Miacha stood outside the door, covered in blood, while Sorcha leaned against the doorway, looking pale and haggard. Her stomach was slightly rounded. He hadn't really looked at her body when she lay in the bed. His son was in there, a son she refused to give up, a son whose mere existence threatened her life in more ways than one. An unfamiliar flicker of warmth lit up in his chest.

"What are you doing out of bed?" he demanded, coming to his senses.

"They killed one of the guards. It gave me enough strength to help," Sorcha said, panting. She almost collapsed. He caught her in his arms. She looked up at him with complete trust.

He gazed down on her, his stomach twisting into knots. Her faith in him might condemn her to the slaughter going on elsewhere in the castle. "Donella turned on us. She's trying to take the crown."

"We should have dealt with her long ago. I'll kill her," she swore. "I'll take her life for you."

"No, you'll get inside this room and let me deal with it." He frowned at Blue Eyes. "You, too."

The woman nodded and helped Sorcha inside. Dymphna was dragging an injured daoine sídhe inside, too, when Drake heard footsteps, many footsteps. A group of soldiers rushed around the corner. The leader immediately beheaded one of the soldiers loyal to Drake.

With a howl of rage, Drake rushed at the group. The remaining daoine sídhe ran, too, whooping war cries. The other soldiers were forced to hold off more traitors on the other end of the corridor. Drake slashed and spun, barely feeling his own injuries as he showed the traitors what a king was made of. He would kill them all.

A song of victory filtered up the stairs, and it bolstered the traitors enough to push back the king's men. Dymphna reached Drake's side, her eyes filled with bloodlust and fury. She nodded at him, and they dove into the traitorous pack, slicing, wounding, and eventually killing them all. Drake leaned against the wall, panting.

Dymphna wiped sweat from her brow. "We need an escape route. For you and the queen."

"They've blocked every conceivable route," a tiny scout said. She had already volunteered to risk her life to check for viable exits before meeting them outside Sorcha's room.

"We need to do _something_."

"We'll win this," Drake said stubbornly.

"Can't you hear them?" a daoine sídhe asked. "They already think they've won."

"Then we'll just have to prove them wrong," Drake insisted.

The scout rushed to the window and looked outside. "They're burning bodies out there." She flinched and squeezed her eyes shut as screams filled the air. "Not just bodies. Some are alive." She lifted her bow and shot the remainder of her arrows outside.

Drake swore under his breath. Donella had prepared for this. "We're in a good position. They can't attack us at full strength in narrow hallways."

Dymphna squeezed his shoulder. "Drake, this is hopeless. The castle is lost. We need to find a way to run. You can escape to Cara's castle, or even Brendan's. They'll give you shelter."

"How can I leave the others here who are fighting in my name?" Drake asked. "How can I run while they're being burned alive? The other courts may avenge us, but for now, we're on our own. We are lost."

Shouts came from nearby—enemies hunting them down. And when the footsteps began on the stairs, bringing with them the clinking sounds of well-armoured soldiers, Drake's heart sank.

"We're doomed," a soldier said. "They'll kill us all."

Drake looked up at Dymphna with regret. "I'm so sorry. You shouldn't even be here. Your daughter..."

"Eithne is in good hands," she said firmly, her eyes glassy with emotion. "I'm in exactly the right place. It was an honour fighting by your side, Drake. You'll be remembered for sealing the rift, I guarantee you that."

No, he would be remembered as the weak solitary king who lost his castle in a single morning.

"This is the end," he said. "This is our last day."

"Then at least we'll go out fighting," she replied.

And they stood shoulder to shoulder, waiting for the end.

# Chapter 7

_B rendan_

* * *

Brendan stretched out his legs as best he could. For "giants," the daoine sídhe had created severely cramped living quarters. He looked at his soldiers. Alyss and Pól were in the middle of an argument about exactly how many days they had been at sea. Brendan had lost count himself. Bran looked paler than usual, his normal hyper-activity subdued by the injury he had suffered on the boat.

Eira came running into the hut, her eyes bright with excitement. "I saw it! I saw your ship!"

Brendan breathed a sigh of relief. Cara was wrong. Yvette could be trusted.

"It didn't leave?" Bran asked.

"Of course not. They want to marry themselves off to the king," Alyss said with a snort.

"Enough," Brendan said gently. "You are sure you saw our ship?"

The young girl looked puzzled by the exchange. "Yes, they're sailing along the coast, likely waiting for a sign from you."

"And will your people be ready to lead us to the First Tree today?"

She nodded vehemently. "May I come? The elder won't let me, but if you said something..."

"I have a far more important job for you," Brendan said gravely. "But it's dangerous, so if you're—"

"I'll do it," she said instantly. "I can do it."

Brendan allowed himself a smile. Unlike the rest of the daoine sídhe, on that island and back home, she was young and eager, not yet as world-weary. "I need you to signal to the boat near a safe place for them to anchor and wait for us. Then you'll likely have to lead us there with the Fir Bolg on our tails. Can you do this?"

She nodded slowly. "I know everywhere. They don't like me to explore, but I need to. I can do this." Her face fell. "You're not going to let me come with you on the boat, are you?"

"This is your home."

She looked around the stone hut and sighed. "I wish it wasn't."

"One day, you'll explore the world," he said. "But not on the first boat. Not when it's so dangerous to travel." He shook her hand. "But may we meet again on a different land."

Satisfied, she left.

"I can't wait to go home," Bran said. "I'm starving."

Pól unsheathed his sword to maintain the blade. "They don't overfeed us."

"They don't overfeed themselves," Brendan said. "It's a pity we can't take all of them with us."

"It's enough that we're taking that elder with us," Alyss said. "Yes, it's great that she'll take care of the First Tree, but she's bringing with her all of that nonsense about gods and the like." She looked at him quizzically. "None of it is true, is it?"

"I don't follow her doctrine, but we can't judge her for believing something different to us," Brendan murmured. When they all gave him an exasperated look, he shrugged. "What? I've changed." Yes, he had outlawed the worship of Brighid in part because he considered it outdated and dangerous, but now he wanted his people to have the comfort they so desperately sought.

"What if we bring back the trees and the others haven't found the stone?" Pól asked.

Bran snorted. "I will bet anything that Cara, I mean the Chaos Queen, will find it."

"She does have a knack," Brendan said with a smile. When Alyss gave him a knowing look, he hurriedly cleared his throat. "We'll simply search for it ourselves. There are only a couple of places it could be. The stone of destiny will be found."

"It's in Inis Fáil," Dafina said from the doorway. "I'm sorry to overhear your conversation."

"You know of the legendary treasures?" Bran asked.

The elder looked astonished. "Know of them? Our ancestors once guarded one of them."

Bran frowned. "Which one?"

"The spear." Her eyes turned sad. "But it disappeared."

"We have the spear," Brendan said. "I mean, it's in my land."

"It's safe." Dafina's eyes glistened with unshed tears.

Brendan unsheathed his sword. "And this is the sword of victory."

"That was once hidden in Eriu," she said, looking as if she might faint.

"Then where's the last one?" Brendan asked. "Where is Dagda's cup?"

"Manannán hid the cup under the sea so nobody could ever again steal immortality."

There went Cara's ideas of using all four treasures against the god of Chaos.

"My people will be uplifted to discover the spear is safe." Dafina stretched out her arms. "I came to tell you we are prepared to leave. Are you all ready?"

"Yes," Brendan said as the others jumped to their feet. "And we thank you for your kindness."

"Your blight may well become ours someday. It's no kindness."

They followed her out of the hut and into the main area where a group of daoine sídhe had already gathered. A small group had been camouflaged.

"This is Aneurin," Dafina said, introducing them to a large, broad-shouldered male with no markings or stains. "He's our greatest warrior, and he will be in charge today."

Aneurin faced Brendan, eye-to-eye as though taking his measure. "This will be difficult."

"We wouldn't know what to do with a simple task," Brendan replied.

Aneurin nodded. "We're safe in this area. There's little here for the fir bolg to be interested in. And the trees are high up on a steep mountain. We have a route that the fir bolg are too large to take, and one or two people can easily slip up and down to tend to the trees there. But a large group of us? And also taking trees with us? That's a much more difficult job. The fir bolg will be interested in what we're doing, more will come, and they'll try to follow us."

"What do you need from us?"

"My people will get you your trees," Aneurin promised, "as long as you can distract the fir bolg long enough for them to get out of plain sight."

"We confront the fir bolg," Brendan said.

"No," Aneurin said hurriedly. "Battles rarely end well. You're taking the biggest risk, so I'll be accompanying you. With my help, you'll hopefully remain out of their reach. We must lure the fir bolg, make them think we have something they want. Just your appearance will intrigue them, and they will follow. We must lead them on a merry chase and finally make it back to your ship. My daughter told me the task you set for her." He lowered his voice. "And I thank you for it."

Brendan nodded. "We serve as a distraction long enough for the trees to get to the ship, and then we follow. It doesn't sound complicated."

"That's because you've never seen a fir bolg," Aneurin said with a smile like Eira's. "They cause destruction, even without meaning to. Our spoken stories, the ones that come from our ancestors, tell us that they eventually came here after destroying their own land, although some stories infer they were given this land after a great service. Either way, the fir bolg are not to be taken lightly."

"What should we watch out for?" Bran asked.

Aneurin's jaws tightened. "Avoid staying out of their reach, mostly. They move slowly, but their strides are long. They carry massive slings with which they fling large rocks. They're strong enough to throw boulders with their own hands, but the slings move the rocks farther along. If you're hit, we leave you behind. Do you all understand?"

Brendan looked at his companions who all nodded. "We understand the risks."

"Perhaps you don't. They were built to hunt and destroy. Stay far enough away, and they may forget they ever saw you, but if you get close, you could trigger a frenzy in them."

"A frenzy?" Alyss said scornfully.

"When the frenzy hits, their muscles bulge, their eyes turn red, and they become unstoppable. They'll hunt to the point of their own death. Even if the fir bolg doesn't stone you to death, if one gets their hands on you, they'll literally tear your body apart. We are nothing compared to them, and you've said our people are the champions of your land. If that doesn't convince you, then nothing will. They carry sacks on their hips, and our elders say they like to take the remains of their victims and shove them in the bags to eat later." He folded his arms. "Are you still certain you want to do this?"

Brendan straightened, offended by the question. "My companions may do as they wish, but while I hold the sword of victory, I cannot fail. And I can't go home without those trees. Our land is depending on us. I couldn't live with not trying. I'd rather die failing."

"Then we'll leave immediately," Aneurin said. "We'll travel with the others for a time, and then break away when necessary." His lips twitched. "I hope you can run fast."

Brendan mentally thanked Cara for provoking his interest in the activity.

They left soon after, traversing the narrow, claustrophobic tunnels again. Bran hummed under his breath without realising it, which amused Brendan.

"This is your chance to be a hero," Brendan said, trying to keep the mood light. "And you're preparing for it by singing human songs."

"I was not," Bran hissed back.

Brendan teased Bran out of his fear by the time they reached the surface. The sky was startlingly blue, and it surprised Brendan how hard it was to look in the light. It took his people a few minutes to adjust.

"This way," Aneurin said, and they all set off in small groups, spread out in case they had to run.

Brendan and Bran stayed close to each other. The heat was oppressive, and Brendan's shirt was soon damp with sweat. They travelled away from the underground mounds and toward a cliff face where they were forced to climb.

"We're almost at fir bolg territory," Aneurin said, annoyingly capable of breathing normally despite the exertion. "Be ready at any moment."

And then they reached the peak, and it was as though they had entered another land. Brendan gazed across the horizon at a sun-scorched plain that was pitted with holes. A strange rumbling sound seemed to attack from all sides.

"What happened here?" Pól asked.

"This was once a forest, but the fir bolg destroyed it," Aneurin explained. "They say the First Trees gave life to the world, and if they die, we all die with them. That's why we keep some where the giants can't reach."

"Why have they done this?" Alyss whispered. "This desolation is disturbing."

"Not everything they do has a purpose." Aneurin shrugged. "These creatures sleep restlessly, and that's how the holes are made. They upset the earth as they toss and turn. Even if they didn't want to, they'd destroy by accident. It's quiet now. This is the time of day they like to slumber, but they're easily disturbed."

And it was then that Brendan realised that inside the holes, giant men slept, their limbs sinking into the dirt as though they were formed from the earth. The sound of their snores filtered across the air like thunder. They were massive, long armed and limbed, and those limbs were as thick as tree trunks. Brendan spotted at least two dozen of the creatures, all fast asleep in the holes they had destroyed the land to make. But then one of them rolled over, and piles of dirt flew up into the air. The giant disappeared into his hole. They really were large enough to ruin the earth in their sleep.

Aneurin held his finger to his lips then beckoned them to follow him. The rest of his people took a different route. Aneurin pointed, and Brendan followed the gesture to see a single patch of unspoiled nature on top of the odd-shaped mountain. He was glad he wasn't the one climbing up there to get the trees. He shuddered as he took another look at the fir bolg. There were no good jobs on this mission. He just hoped Eira managed to signal to the ship in time. If they missed their chance, they likely wouldn't get another.

They crept down a winding path cut into the mountain. It was too narrow and steep for the fir bolg to climb, but Brendan didn't fancy his own chances at getting back up there either.

Some stones skittered down the mountain from the other group, and the nearest fir bolg stirred.

"Hurry," Aneurin urged under his breath.

They moved more quickly, but Pól slipped and skidded a few feet as he desperately struggled to stop his fall. Aneurin grabbed his collar and held on tight as Pól found his grip again. As Brendan followed, he noticed blood stains on the rock.

At the foot of the mountain, he took Pól's hands to inspect the damage. "You've torn them to ribbons."

"I can still hold my sword," Pól said resolutely.

"Not like this you can't." Brendan tore strips off his own shirt and wrapped them around his soldier's hands. "We'll clean the wounds when we get back. I'd rather we make it home with all of our limbs intact."

That earned him a wry smile from Pól.

Aneurin led them toward the giants, ready to make noise if any noticed the removal of the trees. Brendan's confidence grew. The giants were practically unconscious. If luck remained on their side, they would make it back to the ship without any encounters.

Alyss slipped and hissed out a swear word. The closest giants all turned over, flinging earth into the air. It rained down on their shoulders, even at a distance of close to a mile away. Brendan's shoulders tightened with tension. On the ground, the fir bolg looked larger than ever.

They were quietly moving past the restless one when a single large, protruding eye opened and focused on them. They froze to the spot, but the eye closed again. A shudder ran through Brendan. The eye was as large as a human head and eerily familiar.

"Run," Aneurin whispered, racing off without hesitation. Brendan followed, his soldiers hot on his heels.

They ran past the slumbering fir bolg and onto a sandy area before slowing. Aneurin cast a glance over his shoulder. " _No_."

The restless fir bolg was on his feet, his gaze on the mountaintop. Two of the daoine sídhe were swiftly removing a tree in plain view. The giant released a sound of rage that woke the closest of his kin. Some rolled over and went back to sleep, but half a dozen rose to see what the commotion was about.

"We have to distract them," Aneurin said, already moving toward the giants.

Bran held him back. "With noise, right? I doubt we want to get too close."

"My daughter's out there," Aneurin snapped.

Alyss shot an arrow at the giants. A couple noticed, and when Brendan shouted, they turned their attention away from the daoine sídhe and toward the group on the ground.

"Wait until the chase begins," Aneurin murmured, his entire body taut with tension.

Brendan watched as a couple of giants lumbered in their direction, but it wasn't until Alyss shot another arrow that the first giant roared and ran toward them. Three of the other giants followed.

"Now it's time to run," Aneurin called out, sprinting off.

They ran for an hour, weaving through a damaged field and coming out onto a sandy area, the pounding of the giant's footsteps never letting up. But the sounds appeared to diminish. Brendan looked behind him.

"Only one left," he called out, but if he wasn't mistaken, the giant was catching up. His group had tired, but the giant hadn't grown winded yet.

"Yes," Aneurin replied. "But this one is focused on catching us. Even if it broke its leg, it would still follow."

But the steps ended abruptly, and Brendan let out a sigh of relief, his lungs fit to burst. And that was when the first stone flew through the air.

"Don't run in a straight line," Aneurin called out. "Don't make yourself an easy target!"

They raced on, farther onto the sand, until they could see the beach in the distance. The ship was out there. Brendan was sure he caught a glimpse of her. The giant slowed on the sand, and Brendan's heart rate eased a little, but the second rock hit Alyss in the legs.

She collapsed into the sand, her leg crushed under the weight, and her face pale.

"Keep running!" Aneurin shouted.

"I can't leave her," Brendan said. "I can't let him take her."

"He's in a frenzy," Aneurin argued. "You won't win in a fight against him, no matter what name you give your sword."

Brendan stood over Alyss with the sword unsheathed, and the giant man stopped looking for rocks to throw. The creature ran at them, heading straight for Brendan. One of Bran's daggers flew through the air and struck the creature right in the eye. The fir bolg howled with pain and tried to grip the dagger, spinning in a circle in his attempt to catch something so small with his over-sized hands.

"Quickly," Brendan said. "Help me get this rock off her."

The others, including Aneurin, gathered to push the rock off Alyss. Sweat beads ran down her face.

"That was a great throw," Brendan told Bran who grinned then shoved harder at the rock.

The stone finally moved, and Alyss was free, but her leg was broken. It was obvious to everyone.

"Just leave me," she wept. "I'm the one who woke them."

"I'll carry you," Brendan insisted.

"Wait, look!" Bran cried.

The giant had gotten frustrated with the dagger. He dug his fingers into his eye socket instead, yanking free his own eyeball in the process. He screamed with rage and flung the eye away, blood pouring from his empty socket. He came at them again, this time ferocious in his pain. His flabby stomach shook as he ran, and Brendan resisted a natural urge to run. But then he glanced at his injured soldier, and a rage burned through him, too. They had come too far to fail now.

Brendan stood his ground, the sword of victory gleaming in the incessant sunlight. The fir bolg was filthy, his massive dirt-encrusted hands holding an axe that he waved in the air as he ran. His arms were thick with muscle, and Brendan could feel the earth shake with every footstep, but still, he held his ground. His own battle rage came over him, the one that made it hard to focus on anything but his prey. He couldn't allow himself to be hunted. His blood burned to fight back.

"Get her out of here," he ordered Aneurin. "The others will help you. I'll hold this creature off as long as I can. Get them to the ship."

But Bran refused to leave his side.

"Bran, leave," Brendan commanded. "Cara will bring me back from the dead and kill me again if I let anything happen to you."

Bran gave him a steady look. "I'm your bodyguard. This is my place."

There was no time to argue. The fir bolg had reached them. He struck out with his axe, but Brendan met the strike with the sword. The metal clanged, but the sword of victory gleamed brighter, and the axe broke. Furious, the creature dropped the remains and swung out his large fist. His strike connected with Brendan's shoulder, deadening it, and the king almost dropped the sword.

The creature came back for seconds, but Bran distracted him with a dagger to the back of the neck. The fir bolg spun awkwardly, trying his best to free himself from the weapon. When he couldn't reach it, he howled and lunged for Bran who skipped behind the creature's back again.

Brendan recovered and swung his sword. He connected with a fleshy thigh, but the creature didn't seem to notice, too concerned with something in the distance. Brendan pulled his sword free just in time. The creature took off in a run, right toward Aneurin and the Green Court soldiers.

"Watch out!" Brendan roared, fired up with bloodlust. He raced after the fir bolg and slashed at its thick hairy legs to try to slow it down. The giant paid the king no mind. Bran barely kept up. Blood ran down the creature's legs, but his strides were so long that he pulled out of their reach quicker than Brendan liked.

Aneurin had heard Brendan's warning shout and was trying to help carry Alyss out of the giant's path, but the fir bolg paid them no attention as he passed them by.

"The ship!" Pól cried out in alarm. "It sees the ship."

_No_! They couldn't let anything destroy the ship.

"We have to stop it," Brendan said, reaching the others.

"Go," Alyss said. "Help the ship. Get on it. Make it home. The realm needs you."

"I'll carry you," he said.

"I'll show you a shortcut," Aneurin said. "And then I'll come back for her."

" _Go_ ," she repeated, her eyes full of tears. "You're the only royal with experience. They need you."

"She's right," Bran said.

"I'll stay with her," Pól said. "I'm not as fast as you and Bran, and we can't leave her here alone. I'll keep her hidden until he comes back to help us."

"I'll come back for you when the blight is over," Brendan said.

"Don't," Alyss said. "It's too dangerous a journey to risk twice. We'll survive here if we know we did everything we could to save home."

"A glamour," Brendan said. "A glamour might fool the giant and give us time to—"

"Don't waste magic on us," Pól said gruffly. "We'll survive. You'll need everything you have to make it home."

"You have magic?" Aneurin whispered in awe. "It exists in your land?"

"It's not infinite." Brendan touched both of his soldiers on the shoulders. "Your names will be honoured," he said, his voice full of emotion.

"We have to hurry," Aneurin said. "Let's go."

He gave them no more time for goodbyes.

Brendan's heart felt ripped to pieces as he left his soldiers behind. That wasn't how it was supposed to be.

Pól and Alyss hid in a nearby cave while Aneurin led Brendan and Bran through a quicker path to the ship.

"My daughter told me where she would be signalling," he said. "And as soon as I find her, I'm leaving with her. I can't risk her falling in the hands of the fir bolg."

"We understand," Brendan said, panting as he ran. They climbed another cliff face, practically fell down a steep hill, and then raced across a valley. On higher ground, a fire burned.

"That way!" Aneurin said. "I'll leave you here to find my daughter. Keep running, and you'll come out on the beach. The sand will slow down the giant, and you should come out ahead of him. If you don't, you'll miss the boat. Get on the ship as quickly as possible because there are rocks in that area that the giant can throw. The trees and Dafina should already be boarded. Good luck to both of you. We'll take good care of the people left behind."

Brendan thanked Aneurin then sprinted away. If he had to, he would slow down the giant himself to give the ship enough time to get away.

"You'll go ahead," he told Bran. "Get on the ship and make sure the trees get back safely."

"You heard the others," Bran panted as they sprinted through the valley. "There's no way to avoid it. You have to come back. The Green Court will disappear without you."

"Cara will take care of everyone."

They ran faster, hearing the giant nearby.

"Cara is what the Darksiders need. You are what the Green Court needs. You came back from the Fade twice for a reason. Do you think the gods would allow that if you weren't supposed to be king?"

Sometimes, he wondered. And he didn't want to stay. He wanted to get back, to see Cara and Drake and all of the people who had enriched his life since he first returned. He had changed because of them all, become a better man, and he just couldn't give up now. Not when there was still so much to do. The thought of leaving either Cara or Drake at the hands of some of the remorseless fae back home made up his mind for him. He had to return.

They burst out of the valley and onto sand, immediately slowing down as their feet sank into soft sand. Brendan chanced a glance over his shoulder. The giant was behind them, thankfully. But it could still catch up. As he watched, the creature stopped running to find a rock to throw.

"Careful," Brendan called out to Bran. "Watch out for the rocks!"

But the first rock was aimed at the ship they were gaining on. As the rock landed in the water with a huge splash, the crew began to pull up the anchor.

"Hurry!" Bran shouted, but Brendan wasn't sure who he was talking to.

A second rock landed in the sand in front of them. They ducked around a pile of rocks and jumped into the ocean as one. Brendan swam against the current toward the ship. He could hear his soldiers on board urging him on, full of joy to see him. That was what he inspired. They dropped a floating buoy, and let it trail behind the ship as it sailed away.

Bran was slowing down. The next rock landed too close to him, shoving him underwater with the force of the impact. Without hesitation, Brendan dove under after him. Bran struggled to make it back to the surface, trying in vain to swim against the current. Brendan gripped his arm and pulled him up, determined not to leave anyone else behind. They broke through the surface, sucking in ragged breaths.

"I... can't," Bran gasped.

"You're coming home," Brendan said firmly, urging Bran on toward the buoy.

With Brendan's help, they both made it, Brendan gripping Bran's shirt as well as the buoy in case the boy slipped underwater again.

The soldiers above cheered and threw a rope ladder over the rails. Heavy with seawater, Brendan pushed Bran up first. He gripped the ladder himself then and began to rise when the final rock landed, sending a wall of water crashing against them, almost knocking them both back into the sea and causing some damage to the ship.

Brendan ignored it and kept climbing, finally clambering over the rails and landing on the deck. As the crew slapped him on the back, he only had eyes for one thing: a set of two dozen trees gathered neatly in front of him, cared for by the elder, Dafina. They had done it. They had taken the trees. All they had to do now was make it home.

# Chapter 8

_D rake_

* * *

All was lost. The soldiers hunting them would soon reach their floor. Drake steeled himself for the end. He had plenty of regrets.

A horn sounded in the distance. The scout, still by the window, peeked outside then frowned.

"What is it?" Drake asked. "More of them come to support Donella?"

"I don't... I don't think so. I think it might be help for _us_."

Drake exchanged a glance with Dymphna then rushed to the window. Two sets of troops were approaching the castle, briskly cantering parallel to each other. The smaller troop, made up of less than one hundred soldiers, carried a black flag at their lead. The second troop was larger, maybe triple the size, and carried a green flag.

"Help from both courts," Drake said under his breath. He looked over his shoulder at Dymphna. "You did it. You called, and they came."

"It's not possible," Dymphna said. "Not unless they were already on their way."

Drake gazed out the window again. Cara had known about Sorcha's pregnancy, too. Was she _spying_ on him?

The footsteps that had been approaching raced back downstairs as a call came from within the castle to regroup outside.

"They'd be fools to face the Green and Chaos troops," the scout said.

"We should find a better position," Drake said. "We'll need to communicate with whoever's coming. Especially if a battle begins."

"What if they're here to join Donella?" one of the soldiers asked.

"Cara would never align herself with Donella," Drake said confidently. "She hates the leanan sídhe, but especially so on Bekind's behalf. There's no way they're here to support Donella."

"The leanan sídhe was always trouble," Dymphna said. She moved to Drake's side to watch as Donella's supporters gathered out front.

"She found out about Sorcha's pregnancy," he said. "That's what started all of this. She knew it would weaken her chances if an heir was born." He nodded at the scout. "You and the others should scout the castle and see if there are any survivors on our side. We'll meet you at the front doors."

He and Dymphna headed straight down to the Great Hall, gathering any allies they could find. They had been scattered and unorganised in the mayhem, but there was a decent number remaining. If only he hadn't underestimated Donella. He had been too proud to share his worries with Cara or Brendan. Even though Brendan was away, the Green court had still sent help.

When the scout and the other soldiers returned with a group of willing fighters, Drake organised his people himself. "They may attack us before the troops arrive," he warned after he was done. "We just need to hold our ground long enough. Donella likes the sound of her own voice, so I'll try to drag it out as long as possible. Do not rise to her accusations or taunts. Let them come after us."

He led a small team outside, but he could see that half of Donella's supporters were already unsettled. Donella herself was pale, but she kept the show going with a flourish of her arm.

"Ah, are you here to welcome the troops of my old friend Brendan, and my great-grand-daughter, Cara?" she called out breezily.

"Brendan's never claimed to be a friend of yours, and your relation to Cara is far more distant than that. She's hardly going to stand against the father of her child."

"A child you've barely acknowledged," she scoffed. "Are you really so certain that she wouldn't like to punish you for what you've done to her?" She addressed the crowd. "Imagine, instead of a barren banshee, we could have had a worthy queen in her own right as his wife. An heir already born. How unlucky we are that our king is so foolish. Here comes my own blood, my own people. I am the only one with enough ties to protect us from either court, the only one capable of establishing a close alliance with both."

The troops gained ground.

"Enough," Drake called out. "Not even the most foolish of your supporters could honestly believe those lies. You are only in this court because you're so hated elsewhere. You have no place anywhere else. And my wife is with child. That's the only reason you started this foolish game, but you see, the other courts had already received word of your leanings toward treachery, and this is how they respond."

"Kill the false king," she spat. "Before he has a chance to cause us further damage."

Some of her supporters were more enthusiastic than others, but most unsheathed their weapons in order to attack before reinforcements arrived.

But the new arrivals had given him time to round up enough to people prepared to fight back. Drake had strong fighters by his side, but the rest of his people were divided into two more groups that he had instructed to leave the castle through different doors in order to surprise Donella's rebel army. While the first skirmish began, the other teams surrounded the traitors, evening the odds of survival.

Drake sought out Donella in the crowd, but he couldn't see her face.

He fought off two attackers at once, ending as the victor, but injured in the process. His wounded arm stung, but his blood was hot with fury and anticipation. Perhaps he wasn't as alone as he thought. Perhaps things weren't as dire as he suspected.

He fought his way to the edge of the battle, still looking for Donella. If she wasn't dead, then she had fled already, he was sure. And who knew what trouble she would cause elsewhere. The Chaos army was racing their way, closely followed by the Green troops. A warning signal was blown, and as the news spread of Donella's departure, most of her followers lost their will to fight.

The fresh troops intercepted those who tried to flee, while Arlen led a small number into the fray. The new additions quickly ended the battle for good. Bloody and sweating, Drake stood there panting as Donella's supporters were rounded up.

"You came," he said when Arlen greeted him.

Arlen smiled. "Of course. My king is ever a friend of yours." He lowered his voice. "Whether you see it or not."

Donncha, head of the Chaos army, joined the pair. "My queen offers her apologies. She couldn't come herself because her adopted-daughter is unwell, but she sent us in her stead and hopes that will be enough."

"It was more than enough from both of you. Thank you."

"This seems to be everyone who remains," Arlen said, nodding at those his men had trapped.

"Any sign of Donella?"

"Unfortunately not," Arlen said. "She may have escaped, but she won't remain that way. She is lost."

"I have a terrible feeling that this won't be the last we see of her," Drake said. "She'll conspire from afar before returning."

"What do you want us to do with her supporters?" Donncha asked.

"I'll need to consider the matter. If I kill them all, I'll have a bare court, but if I pardon them, I'll live in fear of my wife's life." He nodded at Donncha. "Tell Cara she was right, and to thank her for sending the Miacha woman. Sorcha is indeed pregnant and unwell, but we are hopeful that she is improving." He gestured to Arlen. "Has there been any word from Brendan?"

"Nothing," Arlen said. "We haven't heard of any sightings of the ship at all."

"My queen asked the water fae to keep watch," Donncha added. "As far as we know, the ship passed safely through a portal but has not returned."

"How is the land on the Darkside?" Drake asked.

"Still poor," Donncha said. "We have incidents on an almost weekly basis now. You may have sealed the rift, but most of the damage was already done. We're just experiencing the repercussions of years of damage."

"We need those trees," Drake said.

"And we need our king," Arlen said worriedly. He flushed. "Anya and I have plans to marry when he returns."

"Congratulations. I wish you every happiness." Drake was half-surprised to note that he actually meant it. Perhaps he had bathed in bitterness for long enough. "I invite you all to stay and refresh yourselves."

"Our troops can set up camp outside," Arlen said. "I think it's best if we stay for a few days in case any of Donella's supporters find themselves feeling a little too brave."

"The same for my people," Donncha said. "We can help lock up these traitors until you decide what you want to do with them."

"Thank you," Drake said. "I invite you, too, and your generals, to stay inside the castle. Dymphna, can you make sure they're taken care of? I must check on Sorcha."

Dymphna nodded then chatted to Donncha about her daughter, Eithne, who was still in the Chaos castle with Cara.

"She is very well," Donncha was saying as Drake left them.

He strode into the castle, still angry with himself for letting things go so far. He should have gotten rid of Donella a long time ago instead of dealing with an insurgence instead.

Upstairs, he reassured the daoine sídhe guarding Sorcha's door then let himself into her room.

"The other courts sent troops," he explained at Blue Eye's questions. "It's over. Is Sorcha well?"

"She seemed to gain strength, but she's weakened since. She's in bed again."

"I'll see to her if you would be kind enough to make sure the kitchens are running. We have a lot of guests to feed."

"Of course," she said. "She'll be happy to see that you're well yourself."

He allowed himself a small smile then moved to Sorcha's bed to see her. She was still pale, but red dots pinpricked the centre of her cheeks.

"It's over," he said.

"I heard an army approach," she said. "Was it Cara?"

"The troops came from both courts," he explained. "Arlen and Donncha led them."

"And Donella?" she said hopefully.

He shook his head. "She disappeared."

Her face fell. "It's a pity. She's a danger to us."

"We'll find her. At some point, she'll get what she deserves. It's what to do with her supporters that I'm unsure of."

"Spare only the valuable," she said. "Either enslave or kill the rest. Leave Donella friendless to keep us safe."

"I'll do as you say," he said. "I expected you to be up out of bed. Didn't the deaths help? Do they need to be sacrifices?"

"Perhaps. I'm tired, Drake."

He held her hand. "I'll stay until you fall asleep. I think I know what we should do with the prisoners."

"Hmm?" Her eyes closed, and she gently squeezed his hand. "What's that?"

"I think I should take them up here one by one, and... are you awake?"

There was no answer. Sorcha's breathing deepened.

As he gazed upon her, the seeds of pity sprouted in his heart. She suffered for him. "I'll sacrifice them all to you," he said. "We'll make you well again. It's the least I can do."

He wished he could solve all of his problems so easily.

# Chapter 9

_B rendan_

* * *

They celebrated with a fish stew, and nobody complained about having fish again. They were just glad to be away from that gods-forsaken island.

"The fir bolg are the ugliest creatures I've ever seen," somebody proclaimed loudly while they ate. The rest of the crew laughed until someone came up with the idea of naming all of the ugly women they had slept with.

Brendan rolled his eyes. "Must I travel with children?"

"They're just happy they have their king back in one piece," Yvette said. "And with those trees to boot. How lucky are we?"

But she didn't look happy.

Brendan didn't feel exactly happy either. His pleasure at the success was marred by those he had left behind. "I'd feel luckier if we had all of those we left on this journey with," he said.

"They made their choices for the greater good," she said dismissively.

He gave her a hard glance. "For a woman, you're not very sentimental."

"As opposed to?" She shook her head. "We've been on this ship for too long if you and I are getting nasty with each other."

"You really wouldn't be concerned if your people had been left behind?" he asked.

"They were just soldiers," she said with a tinkling laugh that grated on his nerves. "They're unimportant."

"They were important to me," he said. "And I left them behind."

"They chose to stay behind. They chose to come on this trip in the first place. We all knew the risks."

"None of us knew about the fir bolg," he snapped angrily.

"You should have said sooner if you wanted your wife to have premonitions of the future, Brendan. We did what we had to. The small sacrifices are worth it for the greater good. On this, I have no regrets."

"Well," he said, getting to his feet. "I'm glad not all of my acquaintances share your views."

Her responding glare was stony. "You do recall that it will be me sitting next to you when we return. We had an agreement, and I expect you to keep it."

Without a word, he stormed out of the room and headed to the top deck for some air. Bran was already out there, looking only a little green.

"How are you feeling?" Brendan asked him.

"I'm fine." Bran sighed. "I just wish we could have done more for the others. I should have offered to stay with Alyss."

"There was no need," Brendan said. "Perhaps someday, we'll go back and bring them home."

Bran smiled. "I'd like that." He turned and gestured toward the trees. "What a haul, eh? I can't wait to see everyone's faces when we return with this load."

"I just can't wait to see everyone's faces. We're quite outnumbered on this ship, don't you think?"

"I just ignore that," Bran said. "I wonder will the children remember me when we return."

Brendan laughed. "Their oversized playmate? How could they forget? I can't wait to get back and eat a meal that isn't made of fish. I've never been so fed up of food in my entire life."

"Have you spoken to Dafina much since we left?" Bran asked. "She seems to keep to herself, more content with those trees than spending time with the rest of us."

Brendan recalled Yvette's disgust at the new addition to their crew. She hadn't been keen on the elder coming back, but he wasn't sure why.

"Not much," he said. And he wasn't sure if he could trust _her_ either.

"She's going to get a shock when she realises she'll have to live above ground. I've never been so excited to go home. I'm going to get the cook to make me about a dozen of those crumbly apple things he likes to bake after Lughnasadh. And I can't wait to ride on a horse in the forest."

Brendan listened to Bran list all of the things he missed from back home. But as he gazed out at the strange sea, there was one face above all others he longed to see, one voice he wished to hear again, and it was the very one Yvette would do her best to stop him from seeing. His people didn't realise how much he would be giving up on their behalf.

"What are you thinking about with such a solemn face?" Bran asked.

"Cara," Brendan said unthinkingly.

"You care for each other," Bran said assuredly. "So why all this with Yvette?"

"It's not what I want that matters. I have so much to atone for." He gripped the rails. "Although I find myself feeling more distaste at the prospect as time goes on. I can't imagine going through with it. In fact, I—" A sound from behind them interrupted him. He turned to see one of Yvette's woman scurrying away.

"She was listening," Bran said, looking worried.

"Most likely," Brendan said. "I'm never free on this boat. There's always someone watching, someone listening. It's ridiculous."

"What are you going to do?"

"I must do my duty," Brendan said. "Yvette's right about some things. I don't see clearly when it comes to Cara and Drake, but I know that she'll never give up the Darkside. She'll never play second fiddle to my court either."

"You're both frustrating people," Bran said. "What's wrong with just being happy?"

"Nothing, but happiness in the faery realm doesn't come without consequence, Bran. We hold too many lives in our hands to dabble in happiness. Even if I free myself of Yvette, I can't see a way for me to—"

"Portal in the distance!" a voice shouted from the crow's nest.

"Almost home," Bran said excitedly. "This is it."

But something else had grabbed Brendan's attention. A ripple through the water was enlarging by the second. Something was circling them. No. A lot of somethings were circling them.

"What _is_ that?" he asked.

Bran leaned over to peer more closely. "I'm not sure."

Brendan thought he saw the flick of a tail before a sea creature lurched out of the water, aiming for Bran's head. Brendan pulled him back with a shout while Yvette's crew called out warnings.

A similar creature leapt out of the water and landed on the deck where it flopped ineffectually. It had a head like a fish, but a human-like torso. Its bottom half ended in two fish-like tails. Without a second thought, Brendan ran through the creature with his sword. It stopped moving, bleeding what looked like green goo rather than actual blood.

And then the boat was rammed. Brendan almost fell over at the movement. "What the hell is happening?" he shouted.

"They're trying to stop us from reaching the portal!" one of the crew members screamed. "We should never have taken the trees!"

Dread filled the pit of Brendan's stomach. He raced to the side of the boat as it rocked dramatically again. The creatures had piled on one side of the boat, doing their best to destroy the ship with their bare hands while others threw their bodies at the vessel.

"This is insane," Bran cried.

"I'm going down there," Brendan said. "I have to get them off the hull before the ship sinks. We need to make it through that portal."

"Wait for me to get rope." Bran ran to help his king.

Brendan wasn't going to wait. "Too late," he said.

Yvette's crew were trying to force the ship to move faster, but the creatures in the water ruined every attempt. He found some rope first, tied it to the rails, and climbed over to make his descent. Gripping the rope with one hand, he held the sword of victory in the other, adrenalin rushing through his body. He would kill those creatures before they stopped him from returning home. That was a promise he could easily make.

Using his feet to balance himself, he held tight then stabbed with the sword. He knocked two of the creatures away from the hull, but four more climbed up in their stead. They were truly ugly and completely unafraid of his sword. He stabbed again and again, his blade stained with green. The creatures communicated in a high pitched language, but they still moved in the way of his sword as though misunderstanding his intent.

His repeated attacks exhausted him. Despite his attempts, the creatures had finally caused some damage. Enraged, he renewed his attacks with increased vigour as bloodlust rushed through his body.

One of the creatures gripped his ankle, and the others keened with excitement. They clambered over each other to weigh him down.

He kicked them free, his arm straining at the extra weight. He twisted the rope around his arm, feeling it burn as more creatures climbed onto him. They didn't care that he stabbed them, didn't care that it brought them death, they continued to try to bring him down, all the while others attempted to destroy the ship. His sword arm grew numb as he chopped and stabbed inelegantly, missing fatal hits more often than not. Seawater splashed him, drenching his clothes and weighing him down.

He heard Bran shouting his name, knew his friend was trying to pull up the rope, but he ordered him to stop.

"Enough!" he roared. "If I come up, they'll take the entire ship down. We need the trees to survive."

He beat back the creatures with every word. He couldn't give up. Not yet. Not until they passed through the bloody portal. At least then they stood a chance at getting home, even if they had to land on human shores in the meantime. He rallied himself mentally. Everyone needed him to succeed. He couldn't possibly allow himself to fail now.

His grip on the rope slipped, but still he sliced at his foes. He sensed the portal mere inches away from the boat as he finally lost hold of the rope. He kept his sword in his hand, and despite being dragged underwater, he still fought them off, giving the boat the chance to pass through the portal. One second it was there, the next it was gone, and as the creatures pulled him down, he ran out of air.

Something heavy hit him on the back of the head, but the creatures stopped trying to kill him and disappeared as though he had been forgotten. He blinked a couple of times in the murky water, but he couldn't see anything bar the light of his sword. The green glimmers were said to foretell victory, but he had already lost. He tried to swim to the surface, but his head pounded, and the water around him was coloured red with his blood. Debris from the ship had hit him, he realised. And then his fight for air had to end because he couldn't even see the surface anymore. His vision blurred as he began to lose consciousness. He held on for as long as he could, never letting go of the sword entrusted into his care.

He thought he saw a mermaid's tail swim past him, and something underneath him buoyed him, but everything was darkness, and he was already dying. The pressure on his lungs was gone. He saw Cara's face as he opened his mouth and let the ocean gush in. Saw her smile, felt her touch, and knew regret. But this time, he knew they would meet again in death, and his life didn't matter anymore. He was cradled in warmth, soothed by the release of his fears, and he found peace.

As he died, as the darkness completely shrouded him, a strong hand gripped his and pulled tight.

# Preface

Sacrifice (Chaos #6)

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By Claire Farrell

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The final book in the Chaos series.

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As a king's life hangs in the balance, alliances are made then broken. Only trickery can help Cara protect those she cares about, but when her enemies show their true face, she realises the truth: every distraction feeds Chaos. Cara's not the only one searching for a legendary treasure, not the only one reaching for power. The journey's not over, but at the end of every path lies Sacrifice.
Copyright © Claire Farrell

Claire_farrell@live.ie

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Cover by Yocla Designs

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Licence Notes:

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_All rights reserved. This eBook may not be re-sold_.

 Created with Vellum 

# Chapter 1

I leaned low to avoid overhanging branches. Dubh's muscles strained beneath me as he galloped, weary from the breakneck pace he had been forced to maintain. We had been trailed at every turn once we'd reached the territory of the Green Court, following the exact path Bekind had pinpointed, and time was swiftly running out.

The sound of the latest set of horse hooves behind us died away, and I exhaled with relief. They had followed us for too long. My fingers were clawed from clutching the reins. Every part of me ached, and it wasn't long before more voices shouted a warning. I held in a sigh as Dubh galloped onward, outpacing anyone who tried to follow.

The Green Court was prepared for war; we had been marked as enemy by those who had once been friend. And it was up to me to end the betrayals for good. We couldn't have known what would happen when Brendan left on Yvette's boat six months ago, but I wished there was another way to fix the mess that had been thrown into our laps.

Dark clouds almost completely covered the lilac moon—a dire warning, some said. The shadows of the forest reached out for us, but I closed my eyes to them all and focused on the path ahead. The cloudy vial hidden in my cloak was a dead weight I wanted to be rid of as quickly as possible.

Eventually, we came upon the meadow in neutral territory. Beyond that grew the willow tree. If I could just make it that far, we might still have a chance. I smothered a scream as Dubh reared on his hind legs, then I looked down to see what had spooked him. We had narrowly avoided tumbling into a dark hole that had formed when a metre-wide section of earth had collapsed inward, leaving only a blistering black substance behind. The miniature sinkholes were all across the realm and spreading fast, faster than the land could be cleansed by the trees that had been brought back on the ship all those months ago—the ones we had been allowed to keep, anyway.

Dubh set off again, though more carefully, and we soon neared the willow tree, unencumbered by trackers despite being so close to Green Court territory. I pulled hard on the reins to slow the horse to a standstill. An unnatural darkness instantly gathered around us. Dubh snorted, agitated, but I slipped off his back nonetheless.

"Go," I urged him. "Lead them away, then outrun them. I'll find a way home."

He hesitated, biting on my hood in his own fae horse way of telling me to come with him, to be safe. But I was about to sneak into the court of my enemy, and there was no turning back. That particular threat had to be stopped before the realm tore itself apart.

"It's time." I slapped his rump and ran toward the tree as the horse raced away. Hopefully, any patrolling soldiers would follow him and not me. He had a better chance of getting away.

I had just reached the willow tree when I heard Brendan's voice behind me. "Cara! What are you doing here? Wait for me!"

Shivering, I brushed away a sudden tear then bent under the boughs of the trees without even a glance over my shoulder.

"Cara!" His voice deepened, suddenly closer. Wraith-like hands grasped my wrist, pulling me away from the safety of the tree.

I lifted the spear, a legendary treasure, and swung the weapon at Brendan's form. It easily slid through him, and the vision evaporated. A shout of alarm sounded nearby, and footsteps came running.

Swearing under my breath, I ducked under the tree to kick at the roots. In my eagerness, I missed the right spot and had to try again, losing precious seconds. Then the entrance swung free, and darkness invited me inside. I stepped into the dark and was blinded. Keeping my eyes closed to avoid the dizziness, I felt myself descend deep into the earth. But the voices were close by, and I knew they had found the way inside after me.

The movement stopped, and I ran down the secret corridor, each light on the wall brightening then dying as I passed them. My first time through the tunnel had been with Brendan. My chest ached at the memory.

Eventually, I reached the end, but the footsteps were gaining on me. I reached up and groped the wall in the darkness until I found the lever. I pulled it and passed through the newly revealed path, hoping I remembered the rules correctly. I continued on my journey, chilled without another person's touch leading the way.

The footsteps had almost caught up, but evidently those behind me didn't know to touch the lever because screams of pain filled the air before cutting off abruptly. A disturbing silence followed.

"Only one shall pass," I whispered, relieved that the trick had worked. Bekind's spy had been right; the Green Court had been watching for my arrival.

I ran up the stairs, hearing voices and murmurs from somewhere above. I could smell something cooking, and my stomach rumbled. I hadn't eaten in a day, not daring to stop long enough to rest. Despite the aching of my legs, I kept running, praying I wasn't too late.

Finally, I reached the end of the path and felt the warmth of the hearth on the other side of the hidden entrance. My hands trembled. I was so close. I opened the way and stepped through the fireplace into a set of living quarters in the Green Court.

Bran's wan expression greeted me as I fell into the room, barely avoiding the dying embers from the fire. He gathered me in his arms and held me up.

_"You_ ," he whispered. "Why is it you?"

I embraced him. "It's been too long, Bran."

"You shouldn't be here."

"It had to be me," I said plaintively. "You know why."

"It's too dangerous for you to be here. If they find you, I won't be able to protect you."

"I know." I plastered on a confident smile. "Everything else is ready. Our armies are waiting to attack. Where is he?"

"In the bedroom," he whispered. "But, Cara, I—"

"We've no time!" I ran past him and into the bedroom.

Brendan was lying on the bed, his face waxy and pale. His hair stuck to his forehead, concealing his scar completely.

I stopped short, stunned at the sight. "He looks..."

"Frozen in time?" Bran rubbed his upper arms as though drawing comfort. "He needs no sustenance, and his condition never changes. It's eerie. A living death."

I quietly approached the bed, removing the vial from my cloak. It took me too many tries to unstopper the lid. Bran made to take it from me, but I pushed him away.

"Will it kill him?" he murmured.

I refused to answer as I stood by Brendan, my entire body shivering. There was a chance it could go wrong, a chance I would fail and ruin everything.

"Are you sure about this?" Bran asked from behind me.

I shook my head. I wasn't sure at all, but in the months since the ship had returned from across the sea, we had run out of choices.

I used my thumb to gently move Brendan's lower lip and open his mouth. His skin felt clammy. I emptied the bottle into his mouth then held his lips together again. Nothing happened that I could see.

Taking a shuddering breath, I impulsively leaned in and pressed a kiss against his lips. I tasted the bitterness of the Miacha's latest potion and prayed it would work. The healer women hadn't stopped trying to figure out how to help Brendan, even when others had given him up as lost.

"Light the incense," I said. "The ones from last time will do."

Bran moved around the room, and soon a pungent scent filled the air. "Is that it?"

I shook my head. I got up and opened the window, but I already felt light-headed from the incense. I took out the jar of honey-coloured balm that Bart had instructed the Miacha to make. It was our last resort, our final idea, and if it didn't work, Brendan would be lost to us. If it did, then the hunchback had a lot of explaining to do.

I twisted open the balm and scooped some out on my fingers, trying to recall Bart's instructions. After warming the balm between my hands, I rubbed the oily substance on Brendan's temples, from his nose to his mouth, behind his ears, and on his throat.

"Can you open his shirt?"

Bran hesitated before obeying. "You shouldn't have come here, you know."

"And you should have left this court when you had the chance." I nudged him out of the way to draw circles over Brendan's heart and navel. "We both have our reasons."

I stepped back, a desperate ache in my throat. Bran handed me a cloth to wipe my hands. He closed the buttons on Brendan's shirt, his fingers trembling.

I traced the king's cold fingers as they clung to the sword of victory. "No change here?"

"Never even loosened," Bran said thickly.

"Think it's keeping him alive?"

"I've heard whispers. They're ready to take... drastic measures."

"I can't figure out if his luck is good or bad."

Bran held my hand. "He's lucky. He's here for a reason. We just have to hope..."

I nodded, my eyes filling with tears because Brendan's hand was still ice cold. Warmth would have been a good sign, at least.

"Nothing's happening," Bran said in a flat tone.

A wheezy sob escaped my lips. I gripped Brendan's free hand in mine and knelt on the floor, pressing my face to the back of his hand. I prayed to any god that might be listening, but mostly to Brighid. I begged for her to forgive him, to help him. There had to be a reason fate had saved him from the Fade—twice. It couldn't all be for nothing.

"Please work," I whispered. "Please just let this work."

Bran squeezed my shoulder, a font of sympathy and reliability. "You should leave. Before you get caught."

"I can't fail," I said aggressively.

"You tried your best, Cara."

"Not if he dies. We sealed the rift to the Fade. If Bart was right and this curse was designed to gradually send his soul to the Fade, then he's lost to us forever. I can't go back and get him this time. This has to work. He can't _die_ , Bran. It would be so pointless if he died _now_." I blew out a shaky breath. "Besides, we need all three rulers to have a chance at beating Chaos. Queen or not, Yvette won't work with us. We need Brendan."

We continued our silent vigil for a few more precious moments, gazing at an impassive face. My heart fractured as the truth began to sink in. Brendan wasn't waking up.

If I could use my emotions as a weapon, then why couldn't I use them to heal, too? I kissed the back of his hand, imagining my body's warmth flowing into his, wishing it were that easy. _If only_.

But then his fingers twitched beneath mine. I jerked up and gazed at his face.

"What is it?" Bran asked.

"I thought... I thought he moved." I shrugged and rose to my feet, unable to look at Brendan and be disappointed again.

"Wait! Look!" Bran cried.

I dared look. Brendan's eyes were fluttering open, his expression full of confusion and weariness. A buzzing in my ears almost set me off balance, but it wasn't the time to freak out.

"Sit him up—carefully," I commanded, moving quickly to pour out a cup of water. "He'll need to drink a lot. For the next three days, you'll have to make sure he takes a few mouthfuls every couple of minutes or his organs might wither and die."

"That was the risk?" Bran asked in a panicked voice as he adjusted Brendan.

"Let him take a few sips, and then rub his arms. I'll take his legs. This'll hurt for a while, Brendan."

Brendan made a sound as though trying to speak. I pressed my finger against his lips. "Not yet. Drink first, and then be quiet. We need them to think you're still asleep. Bran will explain everything soon."

He seemed totally confused, and rightly so, but he obeyed, trusting me. And I smiled, filled with a glorious warmth that had been missing for months. He was alive. He was okay. Everything could go back to normal. Or rather, maybe we'd actually have a chance to finish the job we'd started.

He sipped then spluttered. Bran laid down the cup and followed my lead, briskly brushing his hands up and down Brendan's limbs to help the blood warm him.

When Brendan was able to flex his hand and rotate his ankle, I made to leave, but his hand gripped mine tighter than I would have thought possible, and I sat on the bed next to him instead. He looked at me pleadingly.

"I'll wait," I said.

Finally, he was able to talk again. "What... happened?"

I glanced at Bran, wondering how I was supposed to begin explaining what had happened over the last couple of months. Brendan hadn't been conscious for any of it, and if it hadn't been for Bran, most of the realm would have believed he was dead already. But the king was awake and talking, and he had a right to know what was going on. And I had to know if the one rumour that haunted me was true.

"Did you..." My voice was trembling already. "Did you marry her?"

Brendan blinked rapidly. "Excuse me?"

A wave of relief ran over me.

Bran nudged me. "We were right. It couldn't be true."

"What couldn't be true?"

I looked away to gather myself. A lot of people had put their trust in my instincts, and if Brendan had truly married Yvette, then armies had prepared for war for nothing.

Brendan sat up a little more. Angry colour rushed to his cheeks. "Would either of you tell me what the hell is going on?"

I nodded at Bran. "Can you keep watch at the door? I need a minute alone with him."

Bran nodded dutifully. "I'll be right outside if you need me. Just don't forget, Cara. You don't have much time. You have to leave."

"I know."

I waited until he left the room before starting. "How do you feel?"

"Confused," Brendan said grumpily. "And I don't like it."

"What do you remember?" I asked, trying to weed out the truth from the lies.

"I remember..." He frowned. "I was on the ship. I was, wasn't I?"

I nodded. "Go on."

"We found... land, giants, daoine sídhe, too. They gave us the trees, and we managed to escape from the giants. On the way back, right before we reached the portal, we were attacked. But with the sword, I couldn't lose. Except... I was knocked into the water." His face screwed up. "I thought I was dying. Did I... how long has it been? A day?"

"Months," I said solemnly. "You're still holding the sword. They couldn't pry it from your hand, Bran said."

He looked down at his right hand, still securely wrapped around the hilt of the sword of victory. He slowly let go, alarmed.

"The water fae were watching for me. They were waiting at the portal. Bran leapt into the water after you to help. He pulled you through the portal, except he was exhausted, and you both needed saving." I took his shaking hand in mine. "The water fae brought you back to the ship. You were both unconscious by then. But you were on the right side of the portal. The ship was falling apart, barely made it home."

A muscle in his jaw ticked. "Who attacked us?"

"I... we're not quite sure. We thought maybe Yvette managed to set up the attack, but it could just as easily have been bad luck—those creatures may have hunted in those waters or been guardians or something."

"How has it been months then?"

"All I can tell you is what I know. Would that do?"

"Yes, yes," he said snappily. "You were... finding the stone. Did you?"

"Yes. It was on the Hill of Tara all along. But it looked ordinary until Drake and I touched it. It changed into a tablet and showed us all these images. I think at least two of us have to be present to see the true forms of the legendary treasures. Anyway, we sealed the rift, and we headed for home. Then we got the word that Sorcha was ill, so Drake and I separated. She's pregnant, and when Donella realised, she organised a coup. But I'd already heard that something was going on, so Arlen and I sent troops to help. Donella's vanished, but the Silver Court is all right now."

He was staring at me curiously, then his face fell. "The trees! Were all the trees lost?"

"The daoine sídhe elder that you brought back on the boat managed to escape with two trees to the Silver Court." I grimaced. "But they didn't work. Or rather, they haven't worked fast enough. The blight has gotten worse, Brendan. It's almost as though it's reacting to us, or maybe this Chaos god has just earned himself a few powerful followers. All we know is that we have to face him. He's the source of all of our problems."

"Well, then I need to get up. I need to help."

"You need to take back your kingdom first," I said softly. "When they brought you back, you were unconscious. We heard rumours you were already dead. It was..." I looked away. "But you were under some kind of curse or poison, because you didn't wake up. We think you were cursed to die little by little and that perhaps the sword of victory helped you survive longer. You've been lying in this bed for months. This is the first time I've seen you since you left on the boat."

He frowned. "But why?"

"Yvette said... she claimed that she'd married you. When you didn't wake up, she declared herself queen."

"And Arlen just let her?" he exclaimed.

I shook my head. "He was accused of treason and sentenced to death."

"No," he whispered.

"We got him away."

I shivered at the memory. I had sent a crew of Darksiders to engage in a midnight rescue before I'd known exactly what was going on. If it hadn't been for my spies, I might never have had a warning.

"Arlen's with Anya in the Darkside. Grim, Realtín, anyone loyal to you had to either leave or..." I stared at my hands. "Bran was able to remain behind. He plays both sides now, and it's risky, but so far, it's worked. Bekind comes to check on you and try different antidotes to see if they work. She and Bran took some of your blood, and she brought it to the Miacha. They've been working constantly to try and find out what's wrong with you, but it's something they'd never seen before. They ran out of options, but someone in my court had a suggestion. It was our last chance, and I wanted to be the one to bring it here. But I'm not a cat, so it was tricky. I used your secret corridor. I hope you don't mind, but it saved my life tonight."

He was staring at me blankly, looking as though he wanted to throw up. "Thank you?"

"We could have killed you, Brendan. We think your soul was slowly separating from your body. We didn't know if you would have a reaction to our solution, or even if this fae was actually telling the truth. It was a huge risk that we took with your life, but we had to do _something_."

He nodded. "I didn't even dream. How is it possible never to dream?"

"Some kind of curse. A dreamless sleep that sort of froze you in time. I'm sorry to bring the bad news, but your people are divided. Some side with Yvette because of her gold and army; others refuse to accept her. We think that perhaps... perhaps there's a chance she has something to do with Sadler's god. The doctor wasn't the only one to come here. If there are others, they're the ones causing mayhem. And Yvette certainly has. Marrying her was one thing; letting her kill Arlen and the others was quite another. I may have caused more harm, but there was no way I was going to let it go that far."

"I need to take back my kingdom," he said in a quiet voice. "I have to."

"You do. And we have troops waiting right outside your territory. I just have to give them the sign. When you stand at this window, your people will be forced to make a choice between you and Yvette, so wait for the right time. "

I picked up a lamp and moved to his window. Soldiers, led by Arlen, were awaiting my signal. I dampened the light a number of times to make a series of flashes. After a moment, the signal was returned.

"They're going to march soon," I said. "Now that they know you'll be here to greet them." I looked at him. "You can't show yourself until they arrive, Brendan. You can't barge out there demanding your kingdom back. She might have you murdered. I don't know what she plans, and I don't care. I've done what I came here to do, and now I have to get back."

"In a hurry?"

"Yes. My troops are out there, too. I have to return to them."

"And Drake?"

"His soldiers are standing by mine and yours. We both know we have to stick together to help the realm. It's too late for power plays."

"Are you leaving me already then?" he asked teasingly as I set down the lamp.

I smiled at him. "I have to go. You should eat only soft food and keep drinking water. The first of the soldiers will reach you within two days. Arlen will be watching your window for you. Stand there if you're able when you hear the soldiers approaching."

"Was it all for nothing?" he asked. "Did I go across the sea for nothing?"

"Not nothing. The trees _do_ work, but something has gone wrong. The blight is pushing faster and harder against us. Those trees are surrounded by the cleanest soil in the realm, but they've had their work cut out for them."

"So what do we do next?"

"We only have one option." I hid my clenched fists behind my back. "The god of Chaos was trapped a long time ago, somewhere in the realm. But he's freeing himself somehow. Some part of his power has returned. And we have to find him and kill him, or at least put him back in his box."

His eyebrows pulled together into a deep frown. "And how do we kill a god, Cara?"

I kept my tone confident. "We just need to find all four of the legendary treasures. We have three already. And when we have the fourth, we'll figure out a way to use them against this god before he destroys everything."

"And if we don't?"

"Then it'll be the end of this place, of all our homes." I looked at the moon. It was time to leave. "Brendan, I'm sorry. I have to go. You'll have to pretend to sleep if anyone checks on you. Bran said that they rarely do, that he's the one who takes care of you, but you never know with our luck lately."

"Let me at least walk you out."

I smiled gently. "You need to rest and eat and get up the strength to face everyone. We still have a job to do, even after you deal with Yvette." I looked at my feet. "However you want to deal with her."

He pressed his hand against my cheek. "You do realise you've saved me once again? In the stories, it's the prince who saves the damsel in distress, yet you're the one who keeps coming to my rescue."

"Those stories are old-fashioned. Who cares about princes and damsels when I'm a bloody queen?" I said with a grin. "I'm just glad it worked. There's a strange kind of magic around here, Brendan. Even the air feels different. You need to be careful now."

"Me? I'm always careful." He glanced down at himself wryly. "Except when I get sent to the Fade or fall off boats, that is."

"The water fae protected you as best they could. But they didn't realise the enemy was on the ship with you."

"Nor did I," he said thoughtfully. "Is there any way this is a misunderstanding?"

I bit my lip, wanting to scream at him that it was obvious. "That's for you to decide, Brendan. This is your court. They follow your rules, whatever you say those rules might be. It's not for me to judge for you. All I had to do was make sure you were awake to deal with the consequences here."

"You risked your life to come here? Truly? Why?"

"Because I had to," I said simply. I had been in wretched pain, wondering if he was going to survive. I'd had to see for myself one last time.

"How are Scarlet and everyone else?" he asked, holding my hand again to stop me from leaving.

"They're all fine. We'll talk when this is over." I leaned over and kissed his forehead. "I'm so glad you're okay. I was afraid..." My voice broke.

He pulled me to him for a hug, and I held on, my eyes filling with tears of relief. I had cared about him for a long time, and the thought of never seeing him again... it hadn't been pleasant.

As I left, I bade a silent goodbye to Bran. Outside, by the willow tree, Dubh was back and calmly grazing as though nothing was wrong. I let him nuzzle my neck.

"He's going to be okay," I whispered. "Now let's go kick that devious bitch's arse."

# Chapter 2

I rode back to camp, giddy with relief. Since the ship's return, I had been in a constant state of panic. The thought of losing Brendan forever was too much, and the strength of that feeling had shocked me. I had been busy with other things—my court, the children, trying to lead by example, working on ways to find the final legendary treasure and defeat the blight—but Brendan had been on my mind every single day. And it was time to win him back his kingdom.

It was as though the closer we got to winning, the harder it became to stay on the right track. Between politics and nature, all of the kingdoms were on shaky footing. Sadler had lost his to me, Drake had almost lost his to Donella, and Brendan had been well on the way to losing his to Yvette. All men outmanoeuvred by women until their friends had come to help. Except Sadler. He had no allies bar a sleeping god. If he had befriended the other courts, I would never have had the chance to rule. Maybe we had learned from his mistakes, after all.

I clutched the reins as Dubh galloped on in the darkness, never faltering in his step. I mentally thanked Brighid and anyone else who had been looking on us favourably—even Bart, whose idea had been shoved aside for others by my suspicious companions until we had had nothing left to try. Bart, who came from across the water, had come up with the one solution that worked against Yvette's curse.

I felt sure that her curse had been born out of desperation. Bran had passed on messages through Bekind since their return to land. On the ship, Brendan had spoken of his doubts about Yvette, and he had been overheard by one of her companions. The boat may have been attacked by outside forces—that was still unclear—but something else had happened in the meantime, and Brendan hadn't woken up from his relatively minor injuries. Before Bran had regained consciousness, the remainder of Brendan's loyal soldiers had been forced to flee, and only Bran's quick thinking and subterfuge in his support for Yvette had kept him by Brendan's side.

Friend had turned against friend in the Green Court. They all believed what they wished, and Yvette had gained herself a solid position by pitting herself against those Brendan was known to favour. Other fae happy to take their places had risen up in their stead, and those of us outside the court gave anyone who left shelter. Bekind had infiltrated the Green Court and found Bran, the pair passing messages between both courts as frequently as possible. Arlen had been convinced Bran had betrayed us, but I knew better. He had just done whatever he had to in order to protect his king.

We had been preparing for months in case Brendan woke. Four armies were ready to force Yvette down, to allow Brendan to step up to his throne. The fourth was the strongest, led by a man called MacKenzie because he thought I would marry him if he helped. And according to my advisers—all but Bart—it was a proposal I should take. It was the smart path to take. Smarter than pining for a king I couldn't have anyway. Grim had spent half his time trying to convince me that there was no way a king and queen of two opposing courts could make a life together without causing the kind of upheaval that would lead to assassination or even war. Even if we both survived the blight of Chaos.

Dubh suddenly reared, almost throwing me. I barely stayed on his back, but as he calmed, I saw why he had freaked. A scout stood a couple of metres ahead of us on the path, his eyes wide open and staring. He looked at me, at my black cloak, my black outfit, and my black faery horse, and turned on his heel and fled... toward the Green Court.

I urged Dubh after him. The scout turned and knelt, whipping out a short bow and rapidly shooting off an arrow. Even though I was already moving for the light shield strapped to Dubh's side, I barely cut it free in time to block the arrow. The scout scurried out of Dubh's way and into the woods. Still holding the shield, I leapt off Dubh and raced after the scout, soon catching up to him.

I threw my shield at him, sending him tumbling. I ran, picked up the shield, and unsheathed a dagger from my boot.

The scout faced me, indecision flickering across his face as Dubh burst through the trees to flank him. The scout threw down his bow and pulled out a dagger. He was quick and roughly the same height as I was, but there was no way I could let him warn Yvette. Not after the way she had treated my friends.

And thinking of that made me angry.

The scout rushed at me, thrusting with his dagger three or four times in quick succession. I used my shield to keep out of harm's way before rolling past him, holding my shield over my head to stop his last desperate attack. I stabbed low with my own dagger, connecting with the side of his knee. The scout collapsed instantly. Dubh stepped on his back with a large hoof, keeping him in place.

"Drop your weapons, traitor," I commanded him.

" _Never_ , human."

My anger spiked, fuelling the darkness in my veins. I pressed my hand against the back of his neck. "You people won't get the chance to kill him."

I projected everything I was feeling, focusing it all into the creature beneath me. I saw my father, Sadler, the doctor, the man who had killed Rat... I saw them all, felt the frustrations of being unable to fight back so many times, and I nurtured that bitterness until it became a weapon the faery couldn't fight.

The scout released a whine of fear, instantly drawing me back into the real world. He let go of his dagger and laid his palms flat on the dirt, his fingers trembling. I was shaking, too, after playing a dangerous power game I didn't truly understand.

"You're going to ride back to my camp." I wiped sweat from my brow. "And if you try _anything_ , Dubh will break your skull. Do you understand?"

We all froze as something dashed through the undergrowth toward us. I relaxed when I heard panting. A shaggy cú sídhe, his long spindly legs well camouflaged in the darkness, rushed onto the path, almost running into Dubh. I saw an overgrown pup unable to contain his excitement, but the scout squealed in terror, so he obviously saw a monster come upon him.

"That's my dog," I said brightly. "He likes to hunt things that run."

"I won't do anything," the scout said. " _Please_."

Sighing, I hauled him onto his feet. "Just get on the horse."

The scout quivered, shrinking back from the fae animals. "Not that creature."

"If you don't, I'll just have to tie you to the saddle and make you run behind. The dog does so like things that run."

The scout made a weak attempt at getting onto Dubh, who kept stamping his hooves a little too close to the man's feet. Few people understood the horse's sense of humour; the scout wasn't one of them.

I had to help him climb on, then I mounted, too. The scout did his best not to touch me. Not that I wanted to be touched so soon after wallowing in the taint that marked my veins.

"Tris, come," I called, and then we were off.

Dubh galloped without any more impediments—speeding up when the scout cried out with fear because he liked to show off—until finally, we made it back out of Brendan's territory and onto neutral ground. Tristram, the hound, ran alongside us, easily keeping up. Bekind had likely sent him to seek me out. I hadn't dared bring either cú sídhe with me on the way to Brendan's castle in case they refused to outrun any confrontation we might have faced. They may have been puppies still, but they were growing rapidly in strength and speed. I had witnessed them hunt and knew not to underestimate them.

We headed for our base camp, the place so many of us had gathered to work together as we strived to take back the Green Court. I wasn't the only one loyal to Brendan. There were many smaller camps—systematically and regularly moved to avoid detection. Yvette had sent out a couple of small forces in an attempt to push us back, and I had gotten some experience in battle strategy as a result of watching people like Arlen and Donncha plan for any possible event. But it wasn't until MacKenzie joined us, bolstering our units and providing sound stratagems as though he thought of them in his sleep, that I truly began to feel that we could win.

Surrounded by soldiers, base camp was likely one of the safest places in the realm, and as soon as we heard the welcomes of the first group of soldiers on patrol, I felt safe again.

Farther along, Arlen waited for me with a group of men. "You did it."

"Not over yet." I slid off the horse and gestured toward the scout. "Found this eejit on the way."

"I'll deal with him." Arlen's upper lip curled into a sneer. "I know him." He nodded toward the tents close to the watchtower. "The others are waiting for you. Try not to tell them everything before I get there."

The tents were bigger than most people's houses. I headed toward them. The group of allies within consisted of many friends I had made since I'd first arrived in the faery realm. The children were back at my court under the watchful eye of Vix, Orlaith, and a number of others I trusted. Armies separated my court from Yvette; she would be a fool to lower her defences to attack the Darkside now.

Rumble and Rafe had both accompanied me to the base camp, leaving the rest of our advisers behind to take care of court—apart from Bart, who had promptly disappeared after we'd agreed to try his idea as a last resort. Rumble had hated being left behind while I'd travelled to the Green Court, and I spotted him waiting impatiently outside the tent. I waved at him, and he held open the fabric to let me enter.

Inside, Bekind waited at Grim's feet in her cat form, Realtín sitting on her back, absent-mindedly kneading with her tiny knuckles. Bekind wore her human form more often lately, only resorting to the cat when she wanted to protect herself from pesky things like feelings. The scars on Grim's bald head looked irritated, as though the brownie had been anxiously scratching in my absence. Realtín's red light swiftly turned gold when she saw me enter.

"You're back," the sprite cried in delight, flying over to curl up against my neck.

Anya stood to embrace me. The pixie worried for Brendan constantly; he was one of her favourite people. Líle greeted me from her place at Grim's side, the red embers in her veins and wings glistening with anticipation.

I greeted Dymphna, the daoine sídhe, then looked at Drake, the father of my child, breaker of my heart, and king of the Silver Court.

"He's going to be okay," I said, knowing he worried for Brendan almost as much as he resented him.

Drake ran his hands across his face. "Good. We can move on soon."

And then the questions started.

I held up my hands. "Let's wait for Arlen." Yawning, I collapsed onto a fur, too tired to stand for a moment longer.

Drake got up to pass me a cup of coffee. "You look exhausted."

"I haven't been sleeping."

A fleeting look of hurt crossed his face. I hadn't been sleeping because I was so concerned for Brendan. But I was too tired to think about sparing his feelings.

"Any word from Sorcha?" I asked to remind him he was married to someone other than me.

"I hear she is improving daily," he said, masking everything as he transformed back into the cold, unfeeling Drake.

"I'm glad." To my surprise, that was the truth. When I had heard through one of my spies that she was sick, I had sent help, and again when my ancestor Donella tried to kill them both and take over the court. I knew some people had wondered why I'd acted so, but I had changed, and so had all of our circumstances. Sorcha was carrying my daughter's sibling in her womb, and I had lately been able to set free my old grievances and move on. Some things weren't meant to be, and it was too late for Drake and me to repair whatever we'd had that had resulted in a reckless night and a child he hadn't wanted to claim as his own.

"Did you have any trouble?" Grim asked, worry furrowing his brow. "There's blood on your face."

"Oh." I rubbed at my cheeks with the edges of my cloak. "Not mine. We were followed on the way there, but the secret tunnel took care of any who kept up. On the way back, we bumped into a scout. I brought him back with me. It's probably his blood. He kept trying to run away."

Drake smothered a sound at my nonchalance, and I gave him a sharp look, but his expression was once again impassive. I knew he hated when I acted fae, but if it kept me alive, I didn't care.

Arlen joined us, accompanied by two short, Darksider men. Jackie had joined us with his sons on our way to confront Sadler, while Bas, the chieftain of a small tribe, felt he owed me his life.

"You're back," I said in surprise. "I didn't expect to see either of you for a while."

"We brought along a few reinforcements," Jackie said. "My boys are still recruiting, but we heard things were heating up this way and thought we'd have a nosy around."

Bas wrapped his arm around Jackie's shoulder. "This one's more persuasive than you think. Are we too late for the battle?"

"No," I said with a grin. It was good to know I still had the loyalty of some of my own subjects.

Arlen looked at me expectantly. "What happened?"

Warmth spread through my body as I relaxed and indulged the memory. I couldn't quite hide my smile.

"It worked. He's alive; he's _awake_. He woke up thinking he had just been on the boat, and he's a little confused, but he'll be fine. He and Bran are locked in his room and safe for now. When the time is right, he'll appear at his window and influence his people. There will still be a battle—I can't imagine Yvette just giving up—but hopefully, it won't be anywhere near his room."

"Did he..." Anya flushed as she tried to come up with the right words. "Was she truthful about the marriage?"

I shook my head. "Bran was right, I think. His doubts were made known to Yvette, and she did... whatever the hell she did."

A collective sigh of relief sounded around the room. We'd had our doubts—taken risks because of our feelings—but it was good to know we hadn't been in the wrong. We had been helping our friend for the right reasons.

"We need to rest tonight," Dymphna said. "We have a big journey to undertake in the morning."

"There may not be a battle at all," Líle said. "The woman would have to be foolish to go against our numbers."

"She was foolish in any case," Jackie said as he puffed on his pipe. He nudged Bas, his unlikely new best friend. "But aren't we lucky the MacKenzie man is so taken with the Chaos queen?"

I glared at him for the reminder. Drake and I had met MacKenzie during our journey with the stone of destiny. The man had proposed that night, and I had offered to let his isolated daughter stay with me for a time. I hadn't truly expected to see him again, but when Leonora had arrived for her visit, her father had accompanied her. He had pushed his presence on my subjects, spreading word of his strength, wealth, and proposal around my court. After the news about Yvette had broken, members of the Green Court had begun to turn up, looking for sanctuary. MacKenzie waited only a brief amount of time before publicly offering his army as a favour to his future wife. To save Brendan, I had willingly taken MacKenzie's assistance, ignoring the consequences. The fae were right. Love _was_ weakness. And I still didn't care.

I forced myself to my feet. "We leave before dawn. Anyone who remains behind at this camp should be safe. I'm going to get some sleep."

"So early?" Bas ran his tongue across his sharpened teeth. "Don't you want to celebrate?"

"I'll celebrate at the wedding." I nodded at Anya, who smiled shyly. "Night, everyone."

I went outside and drank in the cold night air. It was summer in the human realm, and my daughter was about to turn two. I felt as if I had squeezed lifetimes into the last three years, but to the fae with their selective memories, it was as though I had always been around.

My own court had stabilised, and the fae were slowly forgetting that they had once shunned and feared us Darksiders. My people were a part of the realm now, battling side by side with their old enemies. Even the human realm was returning to a version of normality since I had forbidden my fae from harming humans. I couldn't control all of the fae in the human realm, but it was a good start.

But the blight still hurt us, and we were running out of time. We had researched every story, every scrap of information we could find, and there was only one thing we were sure about: we weren't the first to seek out all four legendary treasures in order to beat a god into submission.

The black cú sídhe accompanied me to my tent. The other half of the pair was at home with Scarlet and Lily, my foster daughter. Lily's real name, Liliana, was such a mouthful for Scarlet that we had all taken to calling the child by the shortened form. We hadn't found her mother, and I had long since stopped wanting to. It was safe to say the court was still adjusting to her presence. They refused to treat her in the same manner they did Scarlet. But between her wet nurse and me, and weirdly enough, Vix, she received plenty of love and affection.

Lily was weak with the effects of the blight, and it had been touch and go for many months, but she was gaining strength, possibly from Scarlet's presence. Lily was six months old, and she showed no sign of crawling or sitting up, but she smiled at me when I looked at her, and we exercised her every day. She would likely end up in a wheelchair like Setanta, but at least she had survived. Scarlet was the perfect big sister, absolutely delighted with the new baby.

Dymphna's daughter Eithne wasn't as kind, and she spent more time with Setanta than she had before. She had already reached her fifth birthday, which seemed crazy to me. Time was slipping out of my hands like water.

In my tent, I lay on a thick fur and curled into a foetal position, Tristram at my feet. Bekind, who had slowly gotten used to the idea of the dogs, slunk in afterward and lay down next to my stomach, letting me wrap my arms around her. The relief was so strong that I couldn't cope with it. Tears were the only release.

Brendan was all right, and I loved him, but there would be other Yvettes, other matches that his court needed from him. Kings and queens from two opposite courts could never be together and still behave in the best manner for their people. Even Brendan had told me that, thinking of his own parents, who had tried to forge a joining of the realms. They had been too consumed with each other to think of their people, and I could easily see that happening to me. I had already made reckless alliances for the sake of a love I'd been denying for far too long.

I quickly wiped away my tears as Realtín flew into the tent and cuddled against my neck. "Poor Cara," she cooed. "You were very frightened he would die."

I tried to laugh. "We have to deal with the god of Chaos. We need all of the kings we can get."

I fell asleep quickly that night, completely exhausted by months of stress and sleepless nights. One problem was almost solved, but we had plenty more battles to fight.

# Chapter 3

I felt renewed as I rode Dubh at the head of my troops, accompanied only by the hound, Rumble, and a flag-wielding Rafe.

I turned to Rafe. "You should turn back soon. They need you at camp."

"Soon. I just want to see this for a while longer."

And it was a sight to see—four armies marching toward Green territory in the breaking light. I could only imagine Yvette looking out of her bedroom window and seeing us coming for her.

I giggled at the thought. Even the blackened soil we rode upon couldn't dampen my mood.

Rumble, helmeted as always, gave me a sideways glance.

"Let me have my glee," I said happily.

"Some would call such joy unbecoming of a royal."

"Some should shut their mouths. This is karma at her greatest."

"Yvette should raise a flag of surrender," he said. "If she wants to live."

"She'll know we need to talk to her first. Besides, the castle's pretty solid. If she doesn't realise that we managed to wake Brendan, then she could be confident we won't get in. And it _will_ take a while to break down those gates."

"We can infiltrate in other ways," Rafe said.

"We want to keep loss of life to a minimum. The best way to achieve that is if Brendan shows himself and his own people open the gates." My entire body trembled in anticipation. _Was that what bloodlust felt like for Brendan?_ A gust of wind lifted my hair and cloak.

"An ill wind," somebody behind me murmured.

I ignored that as best I could. Odd things had been happening in the realm, and I really hoped Yvette wasn't confident because she felt sure some god would act on her behalf.

A dappled grey mare rode toward us, the rider in steel armour that had been painted black. I groaned inwardly. MacKenzie had some kind of radar when it came to my whereabouts.

He pulled the reins in front of us and nodded his head politely. "I wear a blackened armour to honour you today."

I bit back a smart remark. "Thank you."

"My men would like the honour of striking first against this usurper. Our trebuchet will make quick work of the gates."

"We'll wait as long as we can before we use that thing," I said. "But take care of the archers when we get close. We need to make it to the gates. Brendan may not be able to help us, but that's the outcome we're counting on. If his people can open the gates from the inside, we can take care of everything else with ease."

"I'll move my men on ahead then." He left us abruptly.

"He's keen," Rafe remarked.

"I don't know how he managed to keep a lid on his usual smug superiority," I said under my breath.

"He wants honour and glory, most likely," Rumble said.

"And to impress our queen," Rafe added slyly.

"I don't want to be impressed."

Rafe grinned. "I don't believe he realises this."

MacKenzie wasn't the only faery who suddenly wanted to be my friend. Even Donella, my faery ancestor who hated me, had sent me letters begging for friendship. She wanted to join my court because Drake wanted her dead. I had refused her first letter and ignored the others. I didn't need that kind of poison in my court. Donella had inadvertently caused her own son's death because he'd fallen in love with Bekind, who she had then cursed. There was no place for her by my side.

Rafe soon left us, and we continued on the uncomfortable journey, slowed by decaying soil made worse by lashings of rain.

I anxiously glanced up at the darkening clouds. "Does this mean the gods aren't with us?"

Rumble made a sound of disgust. "You're the one who tells us we make our own destinies. Are you going to fall for superstition now?"

"It's not superstition if it's true." I wiped rain from my face and tried not to flinch when my hand came away grey. The blight was everywhere.

"We'll find the cup," he said. "And the king will survive to help unlock the power of the treasures. This world has changed completely since you first joined the fae. There's nothing that cannot be undone."

I hoped he was right. Some of the soldiers—those who were ridiculously loyal to me because of past events—began to sing a warrior song. As we rode, morale improved, and even my heart beat faster with excitement.

By the time we reached the gates of the Green Court, MacKenzie's troops had taken care of the scouts and the first line of defence. They had already settled in, using wooden palisades to create structures that blocked the other soldiers' arrows and even their sight. We weren't safe, but it was the next best thing.

"He's laid siege before," Rumble said, a note of worry in his tone.

"That's why we need him."

We sought out Arlen and Drake. Their soldiers had helped surround the Green Court, forcing Yvette's soldiers to barricade themselves inside the walls.

Arlen found me, and together, we made our way to Drake.

"Brendan's going to be pissed he missed this," I said.

Arlen barked out a laugh. "He'll get to play his part."

Drake came toward us, and even in the distance, his features looked stern and cold. He had once been my lifeline, but we had drifted so far apart. His marriage, Scarlet's birth... everything had conspired against us, but on our mission to seal the rift in the Fade, I thought we had mended some bridges. Sorcha's pregnancy had divided us once again, and he had been acting strangely lately.

"I admit I doubted him at first," Arlen said. "But he's repaid us in full."

"You doubted me, too," I reminded him.

He glanced at me, a note of agitation in his expression. "I still believe you could be Brendan's downfall. It just so happened that this woman beat you to it."

I rolled my eyes. For many reasons, Arlen would never be my best friend, but we had worked together for Brendan.

Drake reached us. "Are you both ready?"

I nodded. "It's time." I turned Dubh around. "The realm needs to work together to survive. It's the only way."

The three of us rode toward the gates, Drake and Arlen on either side of me. Rumble and the black hound followed us closely. MacKenzie's troops separated to let us pass. Despite our numbers, the silence was palpable. The Green Court had made no attempt at communication. It was time for us to bring the fight to them.

We reached the closed gates, and I kept my posture straight and steady under the gaze of the watchers on the walls.

Arlen held out a horn and blew a warning signal. It ran long and loud and vibrated through my limbs. There was no turning back.

"Traitors!" somebody shouted, and it was as if a switch had been flipped. Both sides of the Green Court immediately began to exchange insults, and the tension ratcheted upward.

I gazed at Brendan's window, willing him to appear. We couldn't contain the violence much longer. That was clear. MacKenzie and others like him were looking forward to war; I preferred to think of the resolution.

Brendan and Bran finally appeared at his window. The king was pale, and I realised that Bran was doing his best to hold Brendan up.

"Your king is watching!" I called out to the remainder of the Green Court army. "He looks as though he has something to say."

A flurry of activity inside the walls drew attention away from me. The iron bars of the gate had been shielded with a large wooden structure, covering most of what was happening on ground level. From what I could tell, Yvette's people were hurrying outside to plead with the soldiers to ignore us and the king, probably claiming he was delirious and in a fevered frenzy.

Brendan's voice sounded weak as he shouted out of his window, but I heard nothing but him.

"At last!" he cried. "Help has arrived from our friends and allies. I've been... trapped here for months, under a curse, and you have all fallen for lies and manipulations. Open the gates, let my friends in, and we can rid ourselves of this traitor."

The sound of an argument followed, and I spotted a soldier dash toward the gate, but she was knifed in the back before she could reach it. Her body lay splayed on the ground, her blood pooling in the rain puddles.

"They're fighting," one of MacKenzie's men called out from the trees nearby.

Something collided with the wooden structure, making it shudder. Some soldiers flung rocks toward it, and it fell. A number of soldiers collapsed under it, having been brawling on the other side. But at least our line of sight was completely clear now.

The Green Court subjects inside the gates had turned on each other. Yvette's women clung to one another, screaming, and she was nowhere to be seen. I sucked in a breath, horrified by the sudden violence. By the _chaos_. Was the battle feeding the god we needed to defeat, giving him power?

A flash of black fled by us, and my heart sank as Bekind slipped through the bars of the gate in her feline form. She wasn't supposed to be there, but I should have known she would follow. She transformed into her human form and pulled the levers to release the gate. It slowly began to swing open, but a spear sailed through the air and violently impaled her.

I screamed and rode toward her. A bloodied faery trod over her in his attempt to close the gates. But MacKenzie's men managed to block it, leaving a big enough opening for a small number of soldiers at a time to pass through.

I was the first through, but others followed, all intending to help Brendan's loyal soldiers. But I forgot all about the king as I tried to reach my friend, my immortal ancestor who had become the sister I never knew I needed. I crossed swords with our enemies a number of times before I reached her body.

I slipped off Dubh and knelt next to her, surprised to find her still alive, still conscious. But the dark blood pooling under her body provided no hope. She gave me a crooked smile. "This hurts more than you'd believe."

"I'm so sorry," I whispered, holding her hands. "What happens next?"

"Someone needs to remove the spear," she said softly. "And then I'll appear to die. But I'll wake up again. I promise. I always come back. Donella made sure I would never find peace in death."

"I'll do it," Rumble said. I hadn't heard him approach, but I wasn't surprised by his presence. He rarely let me out of his sight without an order.

Bekind nodded then winced. The hound nudged her face, whining. She clutched my hand tight as Rumble cut off the handle of the spear.

"I'm sorry for this," he told her. "I'll try to be quick."

With one swift movement, he yanked the spear free. Bekind's back arched as an awful scream erupted from her lips. I gathered her in my arms, tears in my eyes at the pain she must have been enduring. Her eyes rolled, her body stilled, and she relaxed in my arms as though dead. It was terrifying to watch, despite knowing she was cursed with immortality and would awake again.

The hound let out a vicious growl as a soldier lunged to attack us. I held Bekind tighter as Rumble stepped forward to deal with him, but Tris leapt into the air and fiercely tore out the soldier's throat in one quick motion. He stood over the body, baring his fangs, and no one else came for us.

"I'm needed," Rumble said. "Stay behind the dog."

He disappeared, and I held Bekind while I watched the scene. Brendan and Bran were gone from the window, and the courtyard was full of soldiers fighting a needless battle. It hurt to see those wearing green uniforms attack their old allies.

I caught sight of lavender hair as Yvette ran across the courtyard, looking for an escape. If she reached the gate unencumbered, I would be forced to leave Bekind to stop her. But I didn't have to. MacKenzie came out of nowhere and got in her way.

She gazed up at him, panting. _"You_. Where did you—?"

He slid his sword through her throat, cutting off the rest of her sentence. I looked away, disturbed by the sight.

I pulled my cloak free and wrapped it around Bekind's broken body. I had to be there when she awoke. I couldn't bear the thought of her coming to cold and alone.

The battle continued for a few more minutes until somebody shouted the king's name. I looked up and saw Brendan walking through the front doors, supported by Bran and Rumble. As the soldiers noticed him, they dropped their weapons. One by one, warriors who had just been fighting on Yvette's behalf knelt before him. Brendan stood taller, pain in his eyes as he forced his stiff limbs to move freely.

I sighed with relief as every sword was lowered and the sounds of battle ended. Dead and wounded bodies were scattered around the courtyard. Our task was done. We had gotten rid of Yvette, and the true king of the Green Court was back to lead his people. We had the rightful leaders. All we needed now was one final legendary treasure.

# Chapter 4

My eyes closed of their own accord in the warm, cosy bedroom of the Green Castle to which Rumble had carried Bekind to recover. I had stared at her on the bed, fascinated, as the wound through her chest began to heal. I'd cleaned the blood as best I could then wrapped her in a warm blanket. I'd planned on waiting next to her until she woke.

When the door opened, I sat up in a panic. Brendan walked into the room, slowly, but on his own two feet. He held a plate of food. "Thought you might be hungry. Bekind, too, when she wakes."

"You shouldn't be walking around. You've done enough already today."

"Not nearly enough." He pulled an armchair next to me and sank into the seat. "My muscles didn't waste away, I didn't weaken. I almost feel quite all right again. It was an odd kind of magic over me."

I took the plate and set it on the bedside locker. "Listen, I'm sorry about Yvette."

"You're sorry you were right?"

I turned in my seat to face him. "I didn't want to be right, and maybe I wasn't suspicious of her for completely unselfish reasons, but I'm still sorry about... everything."

"I hear your new ally killed her." His searching gaze pierced me. "I hear that the battle might have been harder fought without his numbers bolstering ours. What made him send out all of his men for you, Cara?"

I looked away. "He wants to marry me."

"He's a quick worker."

I flashed him a quick grin. "He asked me after knowing me about two hours. I didn't get too excited. He told me straight out he just wants power and a son. His daughter's staying in my court. He had planned on marrying her off to you."

Brendan looked startled. "How many wives do these people expect me to have?"

I giggled. "Just be grateful they aren't looking at you like you're a broodmare."

He made a face. "It feels strange that so much has happened that I'm not aware of. What next, Cara? We tried to end the blight, and apparently, we've failed. What do we do?"

"We take down a god," I said firmly. "We have many people working on theories. According to Drake, the elder you brought back on the ship has been helpful in drawing links between half-forgotten stories. The thing is, while you were gone, Rumble told me that Sadler brought five people to court with him when he returned from what we suspect was a journey across the sea."

"Five." He seemed to turn that over in his head. Then it dawned on him. "You believe one of these people to have been Yvette."

"That doesn't necessarily mean she was working on behalf of Chaos. But the blight did worsen while you were cursed."

"It's a pity we can't ask her," he said wryly. "Did your suitor have to be so diligent?"

"I know someone I can ask. And this time I'm going to get answers. When Bekind is okay to travel, I'm going home, and I promise you, I'm going to figure out how to defeat this god if it's the last thing I do."

"Don't tempt fate. Apparently, I need you around to keep me safe. How many times have you saved my life now? I don't know why I ever let you out of my sight."

His lighthearted grin was back, as though nothing had changed, but I hadn't seen him in months. I'd thought about him daily, obsessively, but seeing him was making me nervous. "It would be a little awkward whenever we were each needed in separate places."

"And you're always scampering off to do your own thing."

"What was it like?" I asked. "Across the sea?"

"So strange." He closed his eyes for a moment. "They have their own belief system, their own ideas about what's going on in the heads and minds of the gods. Have you spoken to the elder?"

"Not personally. She's staying with the daoine sídhe in the Silver Court."

"Good. Don't."

I was taken aback by his vehemence. "What's that about?"

He sighed. "Ignore me. I'm just worried her stories will have half the realm building boats in a bid to get over the sea and champion their causes."

"I have no interest in crossing that sea. Don't worry."

"Glad to hear it. I had to leave good people behind."

"I know." My heart warmed. "You feel guilty."

"Is that what this is?" He shrugged. "I feel as though I didn't do enough."

"You saved everyone on that ship. Bran told Bekind what happened. You were going to die, for them, for _Yvette_." My eyes filled with tears. "I would have been so pissed at you, just so you know."

His expression softened. "That ship almost drove us all insane. I thought of you, Cara. Often. I feared I would never see your face again. If you had been with me, it would all have been different."

"I'm not a miracle worker," I teased.

He grinned. "No, you're just my lucky charm."

I leaned over to hug him, and he pulled me onto his lap. I held on, my face pressed against his neck, until I felt reassured that he was back, that he was okay, that he wasn't going to disappear again. "Sorry," I murmured against his skin. "I just..."

"I know." His voice tremored. "I know it."

I raised my head. Our faces were inches apart. "Do you?" I asked, my heart racing.

"Time and distance don't matter to the likes of us," he said.

I was only aware of the warmth of his hands, and the look in his eye, and the way I felt as though I were in the right place at the right time. I ran my hand through his hair. "It didn't even grow much."

"I bet the little butterfly has grown."

"She's two next week."

He faltered. "I keep forgetting time has moved on without me again."

"Nothing moved on without you," I said. "But children grow."

He cupped my cheek. "She's an old soul like her mother. Age means nothing."

I snorted. "Old soul indeed."

"I must find her a present."

"You don't have to do that."

"I hear we're all invading your home for a wedding, so we may as well be there for the birthday celebrations, too." He sighed. "If only to start on the next part of the plan."

"We all have a lot to discuss. But if you don't make it, I'll save you a piece of birthday cake."

He ran his hand around the base of my spine, his fingertips finding skin where my shirt parted from my trousers. I hissed at the sensation. It had been so long since I'd felt the kind of comfort that his touch might bring.

He smiled as if at ease, but it had always been that way. There was a certain intimacy between us that never died. "Did you miss me this time?"

I traced the scar on his forehead. "Not just this time."

Bekind moaned, and I jumped.

"Go on then." He gently pushed me away. "Help her recover."

I moved to the bed, only sparing a glance over my shoulder as Brendan left the room. Everything felt less scary with him around, which made it easier to forget my troubles. But I couldn't depend on him. For all of our sakes.

Bekind moved carefully, and I sat next to her.

"Hey," I said. "How are you doing?"

She winced. "I hate when that happens."

"I'm so sorry."

She opened her eyes fully and tried to smile. "There are boons even to a curse. I'm glad you're here this time."

"I'll always be here for you. We're family now."

"Are we going home?" she asked hopefully.

"Yes. It's almost time to go home."

She ate a little food and rested, listening as I described the rest of the battle to her.

"So all's well." She sat up, colour flooding her cheeks. "I think I've recovered."

"So quickly?"

"The process is painful but rarely lasts longer than a few hours." She dressed quickly. "I'm fit to travel. How is Brendan now?"

"It's as if nothing happened to him."

"Good. We have a lot of work to do."

"Yeah, there's a lot we still have to figure out about this god, and—"

"I meant the wedding," she said sharply. "And the birthday party. It'll be one big Lughnasadh celebration, seeing as no one could enjoy the festival properly."

"Half the court is in the human realm toiling on the land we bought. It's not like they can all just... stop."

"I know this, which is why I've only arranged for those with children to return." She smiled dreamily. "Scarlet will have a birthday fit for a princess, and the realm will have something to celebrate for a change."

It made me sad to think that my family couldn't be there, and sadder that Drake likely wasn't planning on attending Scarlet's birthday party. But she would be surrounded by people who adored her. It would be one brief day of light in the impending gloom, and we all needed an excuse to relax. We wouldn't have more than a day.

A heavy insistent knock sounded at the door.

"Ignore it," Bekind purred as she stretched.

But the knocker didn't wait for a reply before barging in. I bristled, but it was MacKenzie. That was his way.

"Are you leaving soon?" he asked briskly, barely glancing at Bekind.

"I hope to leave today," I said, wishing he would just go away.

"And do you need the accompaniment of my soldiers?"

"I'll be fine. Thank you though."

He closed the space between us to take my hand. His grey eyes were clear and calculating. "And when will we wed?"

"I don't think—"

He squeezed my fingers so tightly it was an effort not to wince. "I've done everything you've asked of me. I gave you an army, I gave him his kingdom, and I took her head."

"I needed her alive."

"You didn't need to hear what she had to say." He sneered. "It would have made no difference."

I pulled my hand out of his grasp. "I thanked you for your help. Now please leave while my friend gets ready."

"Are you dismissing me?"

He sounded so astonished that I might have laughed if I wasn't so unsettled by him.

"Our business is over for now. There's no need for—"

His expression shifted into something uglier. "How dare you? You made me believe you would marry me as soon as the king regained his throne. Are you really so—"

"I never said I would marry you," I said, my voice firm. "You offered your assistance, and I accepted."

"You knew why I was offering my troops. You knew what I wanted. I would never have helped this king if it wasn't for that."

"I know," I said kindly. "And I'm sorry if you feel misled, but I went to the Fade for that man. I would do anything to know he was safe."

"You fool," he spat. "You could have had everything at your feet if you weren't so... human."

I touched the locket around my neck. "That's the biggest compliment you could give me."

"You'll regret this day."

"I don't believe I'll ever regret this day," I said, holding his gaze.

He broke away first and stormed out the door, only pausing to say, "Send my daughter home at once."

He slammed the door. I shivered.

"What an odious man," Bekind said.

"He's intense." I sat in a chair and sighed. "He's right to be angry, but I could never marry him."

_"That_ would be a regretful day. But he's the wrong enemy to make, Cara. I wish you hadn't involved him at all."

"I had to be sure that it would go well today. As quickly and painlessly as possible."

She made a face. "Painless for some."

My shaky grin fooled no one. "It's all over now. We should get ready to go. It's going to be a long journey home, and I'm exhausted."

By the time we headed downstairs, MacKenzie's troops were already marching away. I observed their departure as my general, Donncha, organised our troops. MacKenzie was angry, maybe his pride was a little hurt, but he would get over it. I'd been forced into a loveless marriage once; I wouldn't allow it to happen again.

There was such chaos in the Green Court that I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to anyone. We had to stagger our departures to avoid causing horse and carriage traffic jams all over the realm. Overwhelmed by recent events, I got swept up in the crowd, but as we set out on the road, my heart broke a little. Brendan would see his homeland for the first time in half a year, and it certainly hadn't improved.

Drake and I had sealed the rift in the Fade that had been blamed on the spread of the blight, but even though what was left of the so-called First Trees that had been rescued from the ship had been planted, the land had deteriorated further.

As we rode through the once-verdant Great Forest, a lump formed in my throat. The trees were dying; those still alive had withered black leaves and black spider webbings along their bark and branches. The Green Forest was turning into the Darkside, and that was why so many of Brendan's subjects had been willing to side with Yvette. Anything was better than risking succumbing to my rule. I didn't want any more land, and I certainly didn't want to steal from Brendan, but to people bred on power and deceit, I was their most dangerous enemy.

With Brendan recovered, I could focus my attention on ending the blight for good, no matter what it took. The only problem was that we still weren't sure exactly what it _would_ take. No followers of Chaos had claimed credit for the recent natural disasters. We didn't have an enemy to fight against, apart from a god who may or may not have been trapped somewhere in the realm. What we really needed were answers, and soon.

After a long, arduous journey, we reached the old base camp, but it had been packed away, and everyone within had moved back to my castle. Nobody wanted to sleep on earth that was damp with disease.

We rode on, but we had to rest eventually. As my group slept, I dreamed of voices telling me to make a choice, and when I woke, I was reminded of the witch in the blackthorns. She had predicted I would make hard choices. I wished the worst of them were behind me.

When we came close to the Hollows, we were able to see how the River Garbh had changed. The waters were still as powerful as ever, but the river was slowly turning black, and all of the water fae had been affected. They would leave the realm soon, to travel to the human realm to live in the sea there instead. But that was only a temporary fix. Eventually the blight would take over the human realm, too.

The Hollows were quiet as we travelled on the narrow path between the hills. Many creatures still lived in the hidden burrows and tunnels. I knew because I had taken to visiting them with food and treats. They didn't speak to me, but they accepted my gifts and had started to appear when I showed up. As I watched, I glimpsed movement under the lilac gleam of the moon, but none of those poor deformed creatures came close. It was strange to feel pity for beings who had once tried to kill me, but I understood everything a little more clearly after all that had happened. I was trying to be a better person—a worthy queen—and I constantly carried the spear of Lugh on my person to cleanse my soul. Whether it was working was another matter.

We continued on our journey but were greeted by a welcome party before we reached the castle.

"It's good to be nearly home," I said. Those who came to greet us brought refreshments with them. The thoughtfulness made me smile, and I thanked them.

"They're happy to have you home," Rumble said as the servants moved on to the weary soldiers. "You've won over so many of the Darksiders. You should be proud."

"But not all," I said. "Though I'm glad to have so many on my side, even if I haven't solved the problem of the blight yet."

"You did everything you could."

Bekind purred on my lap as though in agreement.

"I'm not done yet," I said.

Later that night, we arrived in the courtyard of the castle. I let a groom take charge of Dubh while I headed inside with Rumble and Bekind.

The children were already upstairs in the new nursery. I had finally left my old cell of a bedroom and moved into a proper room next to the nursery. I felt safe in my own castle, but that shift in perspective had happened so gradually that it still surprised me. I had sought to change the Darksiders too quickly, and when that had failed, I had been too tough on them, severely punishing them. That hadn't helped either. Since then, I had been doing my best to find the balance between indulgence and discipline, but the times I had succumbed to cruelty had permanently changed me.

I ran upstairs to see the children. The nursery was sectioned into two areas: one for play and one for sleeping. Paintings of magical forests decorated the walls, while the room itself was furnished with plenty of comfortable furniture and even more toys.

I stopped short, seeing Vix cradling Lily while Anya read Scarlet a story.

"Hey," I said softly. "Not in bed yet?"

"We waited for you," Vix said.

Scarlet squealed and ran for me, her arms out wide. I picked her up and held her to me, relishing how freely she gave her love.

"I missed you," I whispered, kissing her face. She happily returned the favour. "Come on. Let's hear the end of your story."

I sat in a rocking chair and held Scarlet on my knee. Vix reluctantly placed Lily in my arms. She was still half awake, her eyes opening and closing slowly. Her irises had become an odd mix of brown and grey, broken up with what looked like tiny crystal-white veins. Her skin was bruised with the taint, but she struggled to sit up when she noticed my face. I helped raise her head, kissing her cheeks affectionately. She might not have been my baby, but I felt like her mother.

"She hasn't slept all day," Vix said. "It's as though she knew you were returning."

"She's just getting older," I said. "She needs less sleep now."

"She tried to crawl while you were gone."

"Clever girl," I whispered, rubbing my nose against hers. Her eyes widened, and the corners of her mouth lifted upward, almost into a smile.

Scarlet leaned over and kissed the baby, petting her hair as tenderly as a toddler possibly could.

"You look blissful," Anya said, a note of envy in her voice.

"I'm just glad to be back with them."

I relaxed while Anya finished her story. When the girls had fallen asleep, I settled them in their cribs and headed out to check on the other children, who had their own rooms. Eithne was already asleep. Her unruly curls were tangled, and she clutched a wooden sword to her chest. Smiling, I took it away and covered her with a blanket.

Setanta, on the other hand, was still awake in his room, sitting up in his bed, holding a book. Conn sat on a chair next to him, reading a book of his own.

"Hi," I said quietly. "Everything all right in here?"

Setanta glared at me. "When is Mother coming back?"

I sighed. Fiadh, his mother, had been banished for ordering the deaths of children like Lily, children who had been fathered by her late husband, Glic. She had feared they would challenge her son's claim to her family's inheritance. I had learned from Fiadh, but her actions had shaken me into clarity. I knew then that I could never be that kind of queen, could never be lenient with that kind of courtier. Fiadh had begged to return to court and later pleaded for her son to stay with Conn in my castle. I wasn't about to turn a child away, but Fiadh was never going to get near Lily if I could help it.

"She's not coming back here," I said. "I've already told you this, Setanta."

He pouted and flung the book away. "It's because of that ugly baby, isn't it? She won't come here because of her."

I folded my arms, irritated. "Your mother isn't here because she committed a crime. She's lucky to be alive, Setanta. And if you're talking about my youngest daughter, I wouldn't." I nodded at Conn. "Make him understand. She's a princess now. She's to be treated with the same level of respect as Scarlet."

Setanta let out a sob and rolled over in his bed. I pitied him, I did, but I couldn't let any harm come to Lily.

Conn nodded, his expression blank. I knew he missed Fiadh, and he probably hated me for banishing her, but in spite of all that, he always treated me with respect. "I'll speak to him," he said.

"Good. Because he doesn't want to miss Scarlet's birthday party."

"Perhaps I should take him on a trip to see his mother after the party," Conn said. "It might help him if she explains it all to him."

"And what will she explain, Conn? How Lily is his enemy? You should make _her_ understand, too. The old ways don't work anymore."

He bowed his head. "Of course."

I left them feeling sad. Fiadh had helped me earn my throne, but she had flung our friendship away over pride and power. She was no better than Donella.

When I returned to my own room, I relaxed, keeping the door open so I would hear the girls when they awoke, although Orlaith was with them and would call me when they were up. I lay on my bed and sighed. While sealing the rift had been a big achievement, we still had so much to do. But with Brendan back, our luck might just turn again.

# Chapter 5

I rose early the following morning to find the entire court caught up in an anxious flurry of preparation. The Chaos Court wasn't the ideal location for a wedding, but it was the one place that had been free of bloodshed in recent months. And with a little planning and a dash of magic, my people could come up with something memorable. Darksiders still needed my council, and I was forced to hold court in a bid to return to normality. Visitors would soon arrive, but in the meantime, I had to address our own issues.

Per my instructions, Rafe sent for Leonora and her friend Aiken that afternoon. The young man had blossomed while free from MacKenzie's domineering attitude, and Leonora was probably the only person whose health had improved on the Darkside. Colour had returned to her, and I knew she was happy in my court. But her father wanted her back.

I met with them both in my office, a meeting room that had an area where the children could play. Bekind curled up between both cú sídhe while Anya supervised Scarlet and Lily. Rumble stood quietly by the door while Vix settled next to him and cleaned her dagger.

"I don't think either of them is going to try to assassinate me on MacKenzie's behalf," I said drily as we waited.

Vix raised her brow. "You never know."

"And shouldn't _you_ be off pampering yourself?" I asked Anya.

"I need to take my mind off the wedding." She lifted Lily onto her lap. "I didn't think I'd be quite so nervous."

"You're happy though, right? This is what you want?"

"After everything that's happened, this is what we both want. He understands now, I think, that a wife is not a possession. That I want to be more than the rest of the realm sees in me. That it's all right to strive for change."

"If he forgets, I'll give you a loan of Rumble to set him straight."

Vix snorted.

Leonora and Aiken arrived before Vix could let her smart mouth get her into trouble.

"Rafe, stay," I said before my adviser could leave again. "I need you to hear this, too."

I invited them to sit at the meeting table and sighed as I thought about what I had to say. Leonora fidgeted with her long blond hair until Aiken took her hand.

"MacKenzie didn't return with you," he said.

"No. Leonora, your father wants you to come home," I said. "He's angry with me, and he doesn't want you to stay here anymore."

"I'm to leave forever?" Her voice trembled with fear.

"I don't know. I told him that I'm not going to marry him."

Rafe rubbed the back of his neck. "He didn't take the rejection well."

"I know you all think it would be for the best, but I can't marry him. He's not... he wouldn't be right for us."

"For us?" Rafe shrugged. "I don't disagree in theory, but there's no denying we could use his troops."

"Let's hope we won't need them again. Right now, we have peace. All three courts are working together to fix the blight. When the kings arrive, we'll come to some agreements and head on from there. But Leonora has been called home."

"I can't go back," she said, gripping Aiken's hand. He looked distraught himself. "Eventually, Father is going to arrange a marriage, and I fear what he'll do to get Aiken out of the way."

"Aiken can stay. He'll be safe here." I was beginning to regret bringing up MacKenzie's words at all.

"Then let me stay, too," she pleaded. "Let me marry Aiken. You're a queen. My father can't... please don't send me back there. I'll die there, just like my mother. I'll waste away. I'm not like him, and when he does marry again, he'll have little use for me."

I exchanged a weary glance with Rafe, who shook his head. "He'll take this as another slight," he warned.

"I know." I held Leonora's gaze. I couldn't send her away. "It's your choice. Go or stay. I won't force you either way, and if you want to marry Aiken, I'm not going to stop you. But you have to face the consequences. I don't know what your father will do."

"We don't care," Aiken said, his blue eyes shining with daring. "It's time, Leonora. We've always planned for this day, for the chance to be free of him."

"I'll be giving up everything," she said solemnly. "For you, for us. But you'll be the one he'll blame for this. Are you sure you can take that burden?"

He kissed her, and my insides melted a little. "Anything he does will be as nothing, Nora. I've put up with him for years for you. What's a few more?"

She couldn't hide her smile. Anya cooed in the corner, while Vix's disgust was clear.

"Go on then," I said. "Get out of my sight before you tangle me up in any more drama."

Leonora knelt at my feet. "Thank you. We'll never forget this, I promise you."

As soon as the pair left the room, I winced. "Don't tell me. I know this is a mistake."

"Two fools," Vix declared. "And you're no better. Have you turned into such a romantic?"

"MacKenzie will calm down eventually."

"Are you sure?" Rafe asked. "He seems like a man who could hold a grudge."

I ignored the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. "If she wants to stay, I'm not going to force her to go just because her disgruntled daddy told me so. Who am I to get in the way of true love?"

"That would be unlucky," Anya said with a smile.

Vix growled. "But—"

"The queen has given the pair permission to marry," Rumble said, interrupting Vix. "Even MacKenzie should not disagree." But I noted he said _should not_ rather than _would not_. But I would deal with MacKenzie's tantrums later. First, we had a wedding to pull off.

A surprising number of guests showed up for Anya and Arlen's wedding. Anya thought she had risen in regard because of Arlen, but many of the fae who had come to see her as more than a giggling pixie to be used for pleasure or pain had done so because of Anya's own actions.

I kept Anya company while she hid from Arlen, superstition keeping her away. It felt great to think about something other than war and blights for a change—and maybe even to act my age for a while.

The night before the wedding, some of our female friends gathered together to share a drink in honour of Anya.

"For fae, your stag and hen parties are pretty low-key," I remarked as we gathered in my room.

"What are those?" Orlaith asked.

"Kind of like wild last-night-of-freedom parties humans have before they get married."

Líle's smile grew sly. "Exactly how wild?"

I thought about it and held up my hands. "Maybe let's not go there. Don't want to give anyone ideas." I held up my goblet of sweet golden faery wine. "Let's just wish Anya the best and go to bed."

"Is there someone _you're_ trying to avoid?" Líle asked with faux innocence.

I waved away the question. "Anya needs her rest. We're up early in the morning."

I ran the others off and fulfilled a promise to Anya to stay with her on the night before her wedding.

"You seem calmer now," I said as we got into my bed.

"I think I was half afraid that something would stop the wedding," she admitted. "Now I'm really starting to believe it will happen."

"I hope you're happy with him. Not just now, but forever."

"I will be. I'll choose to be happy, no matter what happens."

"I wish I could be like that sometimes." I heaved a sigh. "It's so easy to let the past drag you down."

"Don't wish away your past if it led you here to us. I don't think I could have escaped my life without you. And it's not so bad for Brendan's pixies—don't think I don't realise we could have had it much worse—but I wasn't... _free_. People are starting to see me as more than just a pixie. I'll never be much, but with you, I'm more than I ever was." Her lower lip trembled. "I just wish I could stay with you."

"You can stay with us whenever you like." I reached out to hold her in my arms. "No matter where we are. This won't change anything. You'll always be one of us, and maybe, when the blight is over, we can try to set up a grotto to pray to Brighid here in the Dark Court. Chaos won't always reign, and maybe a place for people to get close to the grotto will help us all move on."

"I'd like that." She brushed away a stray tear. "Líle would approve, too."

"She seems so much better lately. For a while there, I thought we had lost her for good."

"We've all survived when the odds were against us. I can't help but believe we were all brought together for a reason."

We chatted together until Anya fell asleep, and I lay awake hoping we'd manage to give my friend a day to remember. The realm might not survive long enough to have another occasion to celebrate.

The morning of the wedding began calmly. The Green Court was kept well away from Anya so she would have the entrance she deserved. We didn't have much in the Chaos Court, but my people did me proud. Elements of human and fae styles combined to create something familiar and unique at the same time.

The wedding was held outside, and when I looked out my bedroom window, I saw an archway leading down an aisle between two rows of chairs. Faeries from all three courts already filled them. The realm had come together to celebrate the marriage of a pixie. The world really had changed.

"It's time," I said.

Anya stood and smoothed her skirt. She had chosen a wedding dress in a modern human style. Ivory lace set off her bronze skin. I had never seen her look so serene or so beautiful. "Let's go then," she said, taking a deep, calming breath.

Downstairs, I held up her train. My own wedding day had been dangerous and horror-filled, but I refused to think of that madman any more than I had to. As we strode toward the faery-made altar, Arlen and Brendan walked parallel to us down an aisle of their own that I hadn't even noticed before. Arlen kept his eyes on Anya the entire time.

We reached the first row of seats, and the pair made their way to meet, Brendan and me following. Arlen reached out for Anya first, and she took his hand. They gazed at each other until the hedge witch cleared her throat.

The pair stepped up to the altar in front of the hedge witch, who began the ceremony. She had been there for many of the significant events I had been a party to, and it seemed right to see her again.

I barely heard the hedge witch's words. I was too busy watching Anya. She gazed up at Arlen with so much love and trust that I felt a sting of jealousy. I could never give myself away so easily, so I would never feel that same happiness.

Brendan reached forward on the hedge witch's command to tie a green ribbon around Arlen's wrist. He passed the ends of the ribbon on to me so I could do the same to Anya, knotting the pair together.

When it was done, we both stepped back, and I looked up to find Brendan staring at me. I smiled, and he grinned back. I hadn't gotten a good look at him since he'd arrived, but he appeared as he always had: strong, tall, and vital. His red-gold hair had been neatly trimmed, and his face was clean shaven. He had dressed in a white shirt and green leather trousers, just as he had at the Provings. His hair wasn't long enough for plaits this time, but this look suited him better than Drake's body had.

It was his green eyes—gazing at me with a marked gentleness—that got to me. My insides seemed to turn to liquid, and I had to resist the urge to move closer to him, to wrap myself up in the content feeling his presence gave me. I had to be the biggest idiot in the realm to be the last to realise how happy he made me. Or just so damaged that I craved the familiarity of the one who had hurt me instead. After all, the ones who hurt me growing up had been the only ones who'd stayed; that kind of influence had crawled into my soul and festered until it had twisted every good experience. But I'd worked on myself, on healing the broken, distrustful parts of me, and had begun to believe that I was actually worth something better.

The first time we'd met, Brendan had been trapped in another body, and I had thought of him as an enemy. How quickly that had changed. How quickly _we_ had changed. While he had been fighting against tradition, he'd still found time to work on the walls I'd built around me. He'd chipped away at my fears and worries, and I'd been so concerned with freezing my heart that I hadn't even noticed it was already lost until it was too late. Love had grown because he'd been the reliable friend who slowly taught me that I could trust him, even when others let me down. He'd been there all along, boosting me up, and by the time I realised I had fallen for him, my actions to protect him had already ensured I could never be with him. We were tied by the trappings of a crown, and even his parents had failed to make that kind of relationship work.

The ceremony went on, hopefully beautifully, but I wasn't paying it much attention until Brendan and I had to participate again, passing each other two rings that we then handed to the happy couple. When his fingers briefly touched mine, a spark ran through my body, and by his flinch, he felt it, too. It was hard not to giggle like a teenaged girl at the surprise written all over his face. I made an effort to subdue myself, and soon, the ceremony ended. The guests clapped, and Anya blinked back tears. When I had first found the fae, a love marriage would have been scorned at best. A pixie could never have married the king's second-in-command.

The newly married couple stepped past us, arm in arm. Brendan held his out to me, and I took it. We followed Anya and Arlen down the aisle, and my mind wandered into an elaborate daydream of my own wedding day.

"What are you thinking?"

My cheeks burned as Brendan's words cut through an imagined kiss. "Nothing," I said then quickly tried to change the subject. "We haven't had sunshine like this in months. Are you doing this?"

"It's not me." He held his face up to the sun and closed his eyes. "It feels good though."

I held his arm a little tighter. "They look so happy. I don't think I've ever seen Arlen go for so long without glaring at me."

He looked down at me. "They are happy. I envy them."

"Me, too, actually."

"Will you come somewhere with me?" he asked. "Just for a little while. I want to thank the water fae who helped Bran and me survive."

I looked over at Bran, who was playing peek-a-boo with Scarlet. "I will. But we need to get back before they cut the cake or throw the bouquet, or Anya will be mad at me."

"Bouquet?"

"I made the mistake of taking her to the human realm to visit my family. Gran decided to remind her of all of the human wedding shows she watched on television while we stayed with my grandparents. Nothing but the best is good enough anymore."

"I am... intrigued."

"We have time while she and Arlen go... celebrate alone. You know what they're like. But the reception party will be soon, so we should hurry."

I made sure that Scarlet and Lily were well taken care of while Brendan organised Dubh. He hadn't seen the point in taking a horse who had no chance of keeping up with Dubh, so we rode together to the River Garbh.

Dubh, with seemingly endless energy, galloped to the river. Upon our arrival, we dismounted near a small stream then walked toward the loud, rushing river.

"It's turning black," he said sadly. "So much of the realm is dying. My journey here was a stark reminder of the larger problem."

"We're doing everything we can to find out how to stop it. It's just a matter of time."

"And has your mirror given you any new insight?"

"I destroyed it." I ignored the tight feeling in my chest every time I thought of it. "It was leading me astray. I couldn't trust it, but I couldn't get what it showed me out of my head either. It had to go." And I had a strong suspicion that the mirror had been closely connected with the god of Chaos. "We don't need the mirror. We can do this ourselves."

He looked at me. "I'll just have to trust you. That's steered me well so far."

We reached the river. One of the water fae I usually met there was already waiting, bobbing on the water, streaks of black winding around her tentacles.

"We're dying," she said. "Your plan didn't work."

"It wasn't our only plan," I said. "But no, it's not working. At least, not fast enough."

"Why are you here?" she asked.

"I wanted to thank you," Brendan said. "For saving me, and my friend."

"Your friend," she said. "Not your subject, not your slave, but your friend."

"He is my friend. And both of us owe your people our thanks."

"We'll accept that thanks when you stop us dying," she said before diving under the water.

He shrugged. "Looks like I'm not the most popular ruler this side of the realm."

"They're abrupt with everyone. It drives Rafe mad when they disappear in the middle of a conversation, but they keep their word. And they're suffering, too."

We strolled away to find Dubh, who had wandered off.

"It's not just the water fae. My own people decided to side with a stranger."

I slipped my arm under Brendan's. "They were scared. Yvette seemed like the best alternative in a bad situation."

"She admitted to me that she was the one who affected you that night after you were named regent. She wanted to see what she was up against."

I nodded. "Makes sense, I suppose, but I don't get why she helped you get the trees if she wasn't going to let us use them."

"Perhaps she changed her mind on the journey." His gaze grew distant. "I doubt I gave her cause to grow fond of me." He cleared his throat. "I've been impressed by the changes you've made around here. The castle is almost unrecognisable from Sadler's time."

"I had a shaky start, but I feel like they've started to accept me."

He stopped walking and faced me. "You're a leader. More than that. You've brought so many changes to all of us. You're our lucky charm."

"I don't know. A lot of terrible things have happened since I first arrived here."

He cupped my cheek, brushing his thumb across the corner of my mouth. "It's not all been bad, has it?"

"Not everything."

"But nothing is simple, even now." He studied my face. "I hope you know now that I truly care about you."

"I do." It was the scariest sentence my mouth had ever formed. But a weight lifted from my shoulders as I acknowledged his feelings. I had stepped off the edge of a cliff, and I was flying.

"Then you understand that it's not a trick; it's not magic. We've all been wrong for so long. We _can_ feel, Cara. We just have to be taught how."

"I had to be taught, too." I covered his hand with mine. "There's always been this thing between us, and I'm not going to pretend there hasn't. I care about you, too, but even you said your parents couldn't rule their own courts fairly. And you were left to pick up the pieces before you were ready. There's so much fear and distrust in this realm already that we can't just abandon everyone to do what we want, so I don't know where we can possibly go with this."

"Then what do we do?" he asked.

"Concentrate on ending the blight." I bit my lip. "Then figure out a way to be happy afterward." But my thoughts went back to that mirror, to the death within the reflection. I had lost hope that we would all survive.

He leaned in and laid a soft kiss on my lips. "Agreed." He held out his hand. "We'll do that together."

Our hands remained joined until we found Dubh, and as we rode back to the castle, he held me tight. I didn't know what would happen if we ended the blight, if there would ever be a way to bridge the many things that kept us apart, but a restlessness inside me had settled.

# Chapter 6

The party began soon after we arrived back at the castle. Unlike at the ceremony which had named me regent, I felt a part of the celebrations. I wasn't alone, I saw friendly faces everywhere I turned, and I felt a weird sense of contentment so unfamiliar that it almost scared me. I had my daughters and I had my friends. Brendan and I had come to an understanding. And Drake wasn't there to make me feel guilty.

But there was still the matter of the blight to contend with, and although they had kept secrets, I knew that a couple of people in my court could answer many of my questions. I found Líle drinking a glass of wine with a pretty young pixie who flirted outrageously with both of us until I pulled Líle aside.

"Listen," I said. "I wanted to tell you that you can go back to the human realm if you want to. You don't have to stay here."

"This is my home." She frowned. "This is where I belong."

"But you and Zoe..."

"It was time for me to come home. We both knew that when I left."

"You left her?"

"It was her decision."

"I... I'm so sorry."

"Sorry?" She looked genuinely confused. "Why? We enjoyed our time together. It's over now, but that doesn't change the good times."

"Oh. Well, that's a good attitude, I suppose." And perhaps it was one I could learn from. I fidgeted with my sleeve. "Líle, I really need to ask you about something. I've put it off for so long, but it's time we knew everything about the blight."

She blinked rapidly. "What do you mean?"

"We visited the Watcher again on our way to seal the rift. I _know_ you still have the memories that clung to you in the Hauntings. A while back, you let slip to some of us something about a vessel? We need to know everything."

The colour drained from her face. "I _can't_."

"The realm is dying."

"I know. It's just... hard. If I let myself see those memories, it's tough to get back to me again."

"I'll help you. I'll keep you safe from those memories, Líle." I grasped her hands. "Keep looking at me and concentrate. Compartmentalise that other life. What do you see in those memories? Anything that helps us with the blight."

She blinked rapidly, and her fingers tightened around mine. Her eyes glazed over, and the light in her veins dimmed. "It's... there's not much I can tell you. This happened before, or something like it, and a few faced the god of Chaos, but without a vessel, they only sent him to sleep."

"What's a vessel? What does that mean?"

"I... I'm not sure. I don't see... I mean, I didn't hear... I just know that Chaos attacked before, and he couldn't be defeated for good. They knew it wasn't good enough, but they had no choice."

"And now he's rising again?"

Her hands trembled and slipped out of mine, but I caught and steadied them. I held her gaze. "We're going to beat this. And I'm not just talking about the blight. You and me. We can keep you whole."

"It's not as bad this time," she said shakily. "Being here, surrounded by everything I know... it makes it easier to separate the memories. But I don't want to go back. I don't want to remember. Please don't make me remember anymore."

"I won't. Now let's get back to the party. Sit with Scarlet until you feel stronger. I know she'll help you."

She nodded gratefully, and I led her to our friends. Around one long table sat Arlen and Anya, Grim and Realtín, Dymphna, Bran, Vix, Rumble, Conn and the children, Bas, Jackie and his sons, Bekind, and Brendan. Amidst the noise and love and happiness, Líle couldn't lose herself. Not anymore.

But I had someone else to find, and I was certain he was back. A number of times during the day, I had caught a glimpse of him out of the corner of my eye. And I knew exactly where to find him.

As I passed Brendan, he reached for my hand and pulled me closer. "Where are you off to?" he asked happily. "Sit and relax. Enjoy the fun."

"I will," I said. "I just have something important to do first."

He let me go as someone else spoke to him, and I headed out of the room and up the stairs, signalling for Rumble to let me leave alone. At the top of one of the towers was an old room that had once held Sadler's treasures and a mirror that showed me many terrible images, images I had accepted as fate for too long. I'd destroyed the mirror and made the room my own, a place to write down the mistakes we had all made in the hopes future generations wouldn't do the same.

And it was in that room that I found Bart, reading passages from one of my notebooks.

"You're not kind to yourself," he said without looking up. "You see yourself through critical eyes."

"You came back."

"Of course I did. I had to see for myself that it worked."

I dragged a chair across the room and took a seat directly in front of him, forcing him to look at me. "It's time. I need the truth now, Bart."

"I know." He set down the book. "You've earned that much."

"You're finally prepared to talk?" I asked suspiciously. "Why now?"

"Because it's gotten so much worse." He paused. "And because you smashed the mirror and freed me from a tie I didn't want."

"A tie to the god of Chaos."

"A tie to my very own father." He sighed at the look I gave him. "My true name is Abarta. Some think me a god."

"A god of what?" I asked, trying to hold my temper.

"Mischief. Mayhem."

"Chaos?"

"I'm no true god," he said in a low voice. "Neither was my father, not until he hunted the gods themselves. He was the one who took Dagda's cup and drank the blood of his enemies until he gained immortality. This isn't the first blight he's wrought on those who didn't deserve it. And unless someone kills him, it won't be the last."

"How do we kill him?"

"You don't." He looked at me pleadingly. "Don't you see? This has all happened before, and nobody but another god even knows how to kill a god."

"So _you_ kill him then."

"I'm no god! Besides, I don't know how to kill an immortal. But what I do know is this: he will destroy this realm and everything in it no matter what you do."

"Then what _do_ I do?"

He lowered his voice. "You run. You take your girls, and you go to the human realm. You forget this place, and you let it die."

"The blight is spreading to the human realm," I reminded him. "Going there won't save us."

His hands clenched in his lap. "It will if you seal the portals behind you."

"Seal the... with the stone of destiny, you mean." I leaned back in my seat and glared at him. "Was it _you_ in the Hauntings?"

"Forget the Hauntings. The stone will save you and your daughters, even the one that isn't yours. It's the only way to guarantee your survival."

"The stone has no power anymore. We used it up on the rift."

"There's a way to give it power," he said. "To... recharge it. All it takes is the power of kings. Who better to take their power than you?"

"You don't know me at all if you think I'd do that. There's another way. I'll find it."

"My father has followers who will do their best to take you down if they think it will benefit them. It's not worth it." He pointed at his chest. " _We're_ not worth it, Cara."

"Why are you even telling me this?" I asked.

"You were kind to me even though it didn't benefit you. I willingly repay debts of those kinds."

"Followers." I folded my arms across my chest. "The glaistig is a follower, isn't she?"

"She won't hurt you. Like me, she wants to escape her past. We only have a taste for survival. Don't punish us for that."

"But at my ceremony—"

"It wasn't the glaistig who cast magic on you."

"I know. It was Yvette. But did she do it for your father?"

"No. At least, not then. She did that to assess a situation, to see if the rumours about you and the Green king were true. What happened to him was her way of prolonging her rise to power. She had no interest in Chaos unless it suited her, and her mistake was growing too desperate." He grimaced. "That was always her failing. But don't mistake us. Whether we like it or not, Chaos walks behind us. We have no escape from him."

"Why haven't you all tried to free him? Like Sadler."

"Sadler was controllable. The doctor wanted to use him, and perhaps even free my father, but the rest of us, we've only tried to escape our pasts. We all want to survive. The blight benefits none of us."

"That leaves one more follower," I said.

"He's not loyal to anyone unless they can bring him power." He wrinkled his nose as though in disgust. " _He_ won't help Chaos."

"Unless it gives him power." I bit my lip. "It's MacKenzie, isn't it? He killed Yvette to stop her from telling us who he is. I wondered why."

"We came here because we were forced to leave our homes," Bart said. "But MacKenzie didn't side with Sadler. He left to make his own life, as did Yvette, and he didn't serve Chaos to get it."

"Except MacKenzie hates me now."

"Men like him despise what they can't control. Will you leave?"

I gave him a tired look. "You know I won't."

His face fell. "I had to try. I shall leave. I don't wish to watch the blight take you, and my presence will only bring more harm than good."

"Go, then. Unless you can be of any more help."

He stood and paused before speaking again. "All I can tell you is that all four legendary treasures are needed to defeat him. One will guide you to his resting place, and the others will help you defeat him but only when all four are in the hands of the rightful ruler." He cocked his head. "In this case, rulers."

I looked up at him. "And then what?"

"I have no idea. I did not witness my father's fall, and I only came here because of old binds I couldn't shake." He reached out a hand then dropped it. "If nobody has succeeded in ending his life, then why do you think you will?"

"Because I'm not alone."

I blinked twice, and he was gone. I wasn't surprised. I had what I needed: confirmation of rumours and a step in the right direction. We had three legendary treasures. We just needed one more: Dagda's cup, the very thing that turned Bart's father into a god in the first place.

I wandered back into the party. The celebrations were still in full swing. I spotted Leonora and took a seat next to her.

"It's so beautiful here," she said enthusiastically, gesturing at the ceiling covered in twinkling lights. Aiken was by her side, chatting with a faery to his right.

"Your father sent another letter, Leonora," I said. "He wants you to go home."

She paled. "You promised."

"I did." I glanced at her. "Where were you born?"

She blinked, confused. "In my home, of course."

"Here. In this land."

She let out a surprised laugh. "Where else? In the human realm?"

"What does your father worship? A god?"

She shook her head. "He believes in nothing but power. I've never known him to pray."

"He's a dangerous man."

"He's... well, yes, he is. Living in that house with him is a nightmare, my lady. He'll marry me off to earn some power, and it doesn't matter what I think. I can't laugh or sing or be happy there." She lowered her voice and gripped my hand. "Have you changed your mind?"

I shook my head. "Don't worry, Leonora. I won't let him take you."

But I had a feeling that it wasn't the last I had seen of her father.

Most of the visitors left before Scarlet's party, but everyone I cared about remained. I had passed on word to Bekind about MacKenzie, and she sent someone to spy on him. She and Vix frequently amused themselves trying to think of names for our group of spies. The group was small but trusted, and that mattered.

On the morning of Scarlet's birthday, I spent some time with her and Lily alone in the nursery, having a perfectly normal birthday morning suited to a toddler. Later, things would likely get ridiculous, and Scarlet needed to know that she wasn't just a princess.

Two years before, I had been fleeing for my life and forced to give birth on the forest floor. Now, we were the official royal family, connected with everyone in the realm. Things had changed so quickly that it sometimes made me dizzy to think of it. I had grown so much older and was no longer trying to find my place in the world. I had made my own way, but I could lose it all to the blight if I didn't find Dagda's cup in time. But this wasn't the day to think of such things. This was the day of the heir's second birthday, the heir the Darksiders had been waiting on, proof that there was life beyond the blight.

But poor Lily was the reminder that the blight would take their children and harm them. I held Lily close, praying that just the proximity to Scarlet would improve her health. I had to end the blight for children like Lily, harmed for the sake of a terrible god who thrived on pain and chaos.

I dressed the girls carefully then called for Vix, who was waiting impatiently outside.

"It's about time," she said, picking Lily up.

"You care about her," I said, lifting Scarlet into my arms. "Even more than you do about Scarlet. Why?"

She blinked a couple of times as she looked at Lily. "I suppose... she could be me." She met my eyes. "I didn't have a saviour like you, but I had Rumble, and people like the cook, who made life bearable. Lily will have a wonderful life, but..."

"But I won't always be watching," I said.

She nodded, and a brief look of vulnerability crossed her face. "And I can take up the slack."

"See? Told you that you're family."

She made a sound of exasperation and followed me to the birthday party set up outside for Scarlet.

I sat in a chair and tried not to yawn out of boredom as trinket after trinket was brought up to Scarlet. She didn't seem to realise they were for her, but she appeared to be pleased by the attention and the shiny objects. The two cú sídhe lay at my feet, Bekind curled up between them, and Realtín hovered over Scarlet's shoulder, more excited about the gifts than she was. Lily cuddled against me, interested but intimidated by the many different faces.

The day was hot, and I grew uncomfortable in the chair. Drake hadn't sent a gift for Scarlet, whether because he forgot or because he wanted to make a statement, I wasn't sure, but I felt bad for Scarlet all the same. She didn't know now, but she would understand in the future that her real father hadn't been there on the days she would remember best.

And then it was Brendan's turn. He stood before us excitedly. "I have a special gift for the little butterfly." He clapped his hands loudly, and Bran appeared, leading a miniature golden-haired pony under the marquee before us.

"Oh, no," I said, laughing. "You didn't!"

"Why wouldn't I? I can teach her to ride if you don't want to."

I shook my head with a smile. "What are you like?"

Bran looked delighted as he paraded the pony in front of us. "Isn't she beautiful? Trained for a child, with a special saddle. Scarlet will be able to go riding." He hesitated before adding, "And Lily, when she's older."

I got up with Lily as Brendan held his arms out to Scarlet. She went with him willingly, and he settled her on the pony, never letting her go. She giggled as Bran led her in a circle.

"It's cute, isn't it?" Brendan called out to me.

"It's freaking adorable," I said. "You should be ashamed of yourself."

He laughed heartily, but a soldier came running to me. "An urgent message just arrived," he said, handing me a piece of paper.

I read it and frowned.

"What is it?" Brendan asked.

"It's from Sorcha. She's asked me to go to her. Immediately."

# Chapter 7

I prepared to leave that night.

"Why are you going?" Brendan asked as I mounted Dubh.

"I have a bad feeling." I looked at him. "I told you I saw Sorcha's death in the mirror."

"The mirror you smashed because it was leading you astray."

"I don't expect you to understand, but I know what it's like to be pregnant and terrified. Donella tried to take over Drake's court because she realised Sorcha was pregnant. That made Sorcha a bigger target than even Drake. Their enemies can't afford an heir to strengthen their position, so Sorcha's probably not had a good night's sleep since then."

"And the fact she's tried to kill you herself means nothing?"

"She also saved my life. Look, I know Sorcha and I have... issues."

"That's putting it mildly."

"She did help us get you back from the Fade. For a while there, I thought maybe she had softened up. Aren't you even a little worried about her?"

"She made her choices, but she's been caught up in the demands of her own heritage, so I'm glad you're looking out for her." He patted my knee. "I just hope you're not running straight into trouble."

"I have Dubh. There's no trouble we can't outrun." I stuck my fingers in my mouth and whistled. The black cú sídhe came bounding out of the shadows to join us. "And I have Tris to guard me. We'll be fine."

"I'll be here when you get back."

That surprised me. "What about your own court?"

"I'll send Grim and Realtín home in my stead, but I feel I must remain. This is the Darkside. The blight was here long before Sadler's games. It grew slowly until Sadler returned. Something caused that."

"Something that may be gaining in power."

"The answer must lie in the Darkside," he said.

I nodded. "I'll see you soon. Try not to boss my people around too much."

"Boss them? I'm having a holiday with the children."

Grinning, I called out my goodbyes and urged Dubh onward. I wasn't too surprised to meet Rumble on a horse outside the gates.

"I knew you went missing for a reason," I called out as we galloped.

"And I knew you would forbid me from joining you if you had the opportunity," he replied shortly.

I was probably the safest person in the realm with him around. I wasn't worried about Scarlet either. It took me a while to realise that was because Brendan was with her. Brendan could be trusted, yet trusting him with her made me feel as though I were walking a tightrope. The simpler life became, the more confused I felt.

We rode through the night, barely stopping to eat and rest. We walked off the strain of the intense riding as we ate cold meats.

"Your horse won't last the journey," I said, concerned by how exhausted Rumble's horse seemed.

"He'll make it. Are you sure you want to reach the Silver Court? People will see this in an odd light."

He wasn't wearing his helmet. In fact, he rarely wore his helmet while speaking to me. At first, the court had kept their distance from him, but as Scarlet never seemed to notice his scars, they forgot to fear them, too. He was a reminder of the old ways to some, but for most, the old ways were being rapidly forgotten.

"People see everything in the exact light they _want_ to see it, no matter what intentions I have."

We washed our hands and faces in a spring. "Look at this," I said. "Clear water."

"But for how long?"

"Just what I need—Mr. Optimistic. Stop being so cheerful, Comhaill. You're giving me a headache."

Rumble smiled. "I apologise. I'm merely concerned."

"The entire realm is searching for Dagda's cup."

"On the word of Bart, a self-proclaimed son of Chaos."

"You and I both know nobody can choose their parents. Besides, Bart's never steered us wrong. He's given us options, but he's never pushed for them, and he's always been right. The realm would be in a worse state if we hadn't used Bart's idea to help Brendan, and he's tried to help me more than once."

"Forgive me," he said, "but if _you're_ going to be so trusting, then I must be cynical on your behalf."

I stared at the water. I had almost been drowned by a siren's call on one occasion; on another, I had almost lost myself to oblivion waters. Maybe it was naïve to force the entire realm to search for a missing object on the word of a man nobody trusted. Visiting my daughter's stepmother in the dead of night just because she'd called probably wasn't any smarter.

"Being unable to trust anyone made me unhappy," I admitted. "I don't want Scarlet to grow up the same way. I want her to see that a ruler doesn't have to be heartless or cold. I'm going to Sorcha because I'm afraid of what will happen if I don't."

"Such as?"

I shrugged. "Every move I make means something, has an effect on someone other than myself. People keep telling me I've changed everything, but I've made so many mistakes along the way. I've been reckless and foolish and gotten myself tangled up in complicated situations that might have gone differently if I had been smarter."

He rose to his feet and held out his hand to help me up. "You saved the Darkside. How you got there is of no consequence anymore."

"I lost my way," I said meekly. "I lost myself. Power corrupts, and I let more than just power corrupt me. I punished the fae for being themselves, and I expected them to change overnight. I enjoyed moments I should have regretted, and I let the darkness in because I wanted to change myself." I pulled the spear of Lugh out of my belt, squeezed it, then opened my fingers again. The black handprint was dark, but it quickly disappeared. "I carry this around to keep me clean."

"And Scarlet?" he asked.

I gave him a sharp look. "It's not Scarlet's job to stop me from turning into a monster."

"She's powerful. More than anyone I've met. Faery children rarely display power at such a young age. She's no ordinary child."

"But why? Is Anya right? Has she been chosen for something?" I exhaled shakily. I'd been told that sacrifice would come. What if it was meant for my daughter? "I tried to hide what she can do, but everyone can feel it, and I'm scared that she'll grow up badly because of the way they fawn over her. I thought that if I did the terrible things then she wouldn't have to. But someone so powerful shouldn't have me as an example, or she'd grow up to be just as awful."

"You see yourself with different eyes than the rest of us. You've been good to us. And you've had to exert your will over us. We expect that." He gave me a pointed look. "Some of us _need_ that."

"I just want to find a way to keep Scarlet grounded and good. She's a spoiled little princess, and it hasn't affected her too badly yet, but what about when she's older?"

"She's loved," he said. "The court piles their affection at her feet because they love her, and that's new for us all. Surely that cannot hurt."

Indulging a child was one thing; indulging one whose power grew every day was quite another. Who kept the powerful in line?

We rode toward the Silver castle in darkness. It was my first time there, and a shiver of apprehension ran down my spine at the prospect. I wasn't certain why Sorcha had sent for me, but she had to be nearing her time. My daughter would soon have a half sibling, and I wasn't sure what to think about that.

Two soldiers raced our way on horseback.

"What if it's a trap?" Rumble murmured.

"Then we'll find a way out of it," I whispered back.

"Halt!" one called out as they drew closer.

Luckily, the second recognised me. "We weren't expecting you," she said apologetically.

"Your queen sent for me. I was in a hurry, or I would have sent a reply first."

"Of course," she said politely.

Her companion flashed a light to signal the castle. It was so dark that I could barely make out what was in front of me, but I heard the sea close by. Drake's castle had once been the Unseelie queen's, and it sat on a cliff facing its twin. Years of history were hidden in those castles, a history that I feared would somehow be repeated when Drake's children were fully grown. I had to find a way to prevent it. And maybe that's why Sorcha was calling for me, because she had finally come to the same conclusion.

The soldiers escorted us to the castle. Drake met us at the gates, his face pale with worry. "What's happened? What's wrong?"

I exchanged a confused glance with Rumble. "Uh, nothing. I'm just... well, Sorcha sent for me, so I came."

The soldiers behind the king exchanged puzzled looks.

Drake swallowed hard. "I see. Well, I'll have a room organised for you, and in the morning, we can see if she's... well enough to see you."

"Well enough? Is she still... is she okay?"

"We'll speak in the morning." He turned away abruptly, leaving me to the mercy of his servants.

We were given two rooms, but Rumble insisted on sleeping in a chair in mine.

"You don't have to stay with me," I said. "We're safe here."

"Something is off. The Silver king had no idea you were coming."

"Maybe I really should have sent a message ahead of us." I didn't exactly like the atmosphere in the Silver Court either.

Early in the morning, I stirred when I heard a soft knock at the door. Rumble opened it before I could get up. I was pleased to see Blue Eyes in the doorway. I welcomed the Miacha healer into the room with a hug. I hadn't seen her in a long time.

"You're still here," I said. "I'm glad to see you."

"I'm glad to see you, too, but we must hurry. I heard you arrive last night, and the queen bade me to send for you as early as possible. The king may... well, let's just go, and Sorcha can explain everything."

Baffled, I locked Tristram in my room before accompanying Rumble and Blue Eyes to a room on one of the upper levels. A pair of daoine sídhe guarding the door stepped aside for us. Inside, two banshees glared at me, but I could barely see them in the dim room.

"Our queen has summoned the Darksider queen for a private meeting," Blue Eyes said. "Please leave."

The disgruntled banshees took their time leaving.

" _Your_ queen?" I whispered as they gathered their things.

"I've grown fond of her," Blue Eyes replied. "They close the windows and curtains constantly, leaving us in darkness, no matter how many times the king comes to open them again." She lowered her voice all the more. "Be prepared. She's not what she was."

Puzzled, I waited until the banshees had closed the door behind them. Blue Eyes opened the curtains to let some air in. I hesitantly moved to the bed, almost afraid to look.

Sorcha lay there, the covers kicked away. Her once-glossy hair was greasy and knotted, her lips cracked and dry, and her eyes were ringed with dark circles. Her skin had broken out, and her cheeks were gaunt. Her arms and legs looked skeletal, making the roundness of her stomach seem to protrude even more.

"Sorcha," I said softly. "I'm here."

She opened her eyes and glared at me. "Open the windows then. I'm suffocating."

"I'm doing it," Blue Eyes called out cheerily. "No need to complain."

Sorcha blew her hair away from her face. "I've never been more uncomfortable in my life." She looked at me uneasily. "I didn't think you'd come. Not after everything."

"What's going on? Drake seemed surprised to see me."

She nodded at Blue Eyes. "She sent the bird secretly. I needed to speak to you before... before it's over."

I froze.

"Come closer," she said. "It hurts to speak loudly."

I sat on the bed next to her, feeling uncomfortable myself.

"You saw how I die," she said, "so you already understand what will happen."

"The mirror isn't a guarantee," I said hurriedly. "I smashed it."

"Good. But, you see, I already knew this would happen, even before you warned me."

"What are you talking about?"

The veins in her neck strained as she tilted her head and squeezed her eyes. A tear ran down her cheek. I couldn't have been more shocked if she'd given birth to a sheep.

"It's a boy," she said in a quiet voice. "I'm a banshee, Cara. We don't bear sons. We bear daughters, and we sacrifice our sons to death."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Death takes our sons before they're even fully formed. That is our sacrifice. Daughters are useful, but boys? They're only good for one thing."

"Your baby is fully formed," I said, gesturing toward her heavy stomach.

"That's because I made a deal." Her voice shook. "I couldn't bear it, Cara. I started to care about him. Me!"

"I know. I know you love Drake."

"It's worse than that," she whimpered. "I love his son more. The son I won't cast eyes upon. I felt different while pregnant, imagined being a mother. I see how happy you are with your daughter, and I wanted something of my very own, too. Because _he_ won't love me, no matter what I do. But a child always loves its mother—that's why the fae send their babies to be raised elsewhere. Just this once, I wanted to know what it would be like to be loved."

I wiped away a tear of my own.

"But it was a boy, and I knew what would happen, but I couldn't stand the idea of letting _his_ son die either. I gave the child a face and a name, and I couldn't let go. So I... I made a deal with my god. My life in exchange for the boy's. I will die, and he shall live."

"Sorcha, wait," I said, speaking past a lump in my throat. "There has to be a way to save you both. We could pray to Brighid, or some—"

"I can't pray to Brighid." She spoke to me as if I were a child. "I'm a daughter of Death. I walk in Death. I'll become Death. When I die, I will accept dead souls into the afterlife. That's what a banshee does. It's too late for me. But it's not too late for him." She rubbed her stomach affectionately.

"Sorcha, I'm so sorry. I know we weren't exactly friends, but I wouldn't wish this on you."

"I know." She smiled through her tears. "It sickens me, but I knew I could depend on you. I knew you would come because you sent the Miacha woman to help me. And now I have favours to ask of you."

"Anything," I whispered, moved.

"I don't want to die alone." Her eyes were wide with fear. "Death is for me, but I don't want to leave alone."

"Drake would—"

"He won't even look at me. He can't stand to touch me, to see me. I'm not sure how I managed to conceive. It wasn't... he won't watch me die because he wants no part of me. Please, will you stay with me for the birth?"

"Yes," I said, although I was terrified myself. "I'll stay."

"Thank you." She sniffed and gathered herself together. "There are other requests. You won't like them. When the child is born, you mustn't let the banshees near him. They will end him if they get the chance. They will hate him for being a boy, for making me choose my own death over his. They won't love him. Nobody here will love him, especially not his father. Can you... can you sometimes watch over him? I know you took in that deformed child as your own. Couldn't you just give him some of that, too?"

"Sorcha, I'll... he's my daughter's brother. I know we have a lot of baggage between us, but I love my daughter more than I hate you. My brother was so important to me that I'd never take hers away from her. He'll always have a family with her. I promise you that."

"There's one last thing." Her gaze turned cunning. "You must _never_ let Drake name Scarlet as his heir."

I shrank back at her vehemence. "Scarlet doesn't need the Silver Court, Sorcha. And Drake has never truly claimed her. You have nothing to worry about."

"We both know that's not true. When I'm dead, you can have him, if you still want him, and he'll love _her_ more than his own son. You can't let him favour her over my boy. Promise me that my boy will get the kingdom he's owed."

"I swear that Scarlet will never rule this court," I said solemnly. "None of us want that, Sorcha, least of all me. No Kelly will ever be queen of this castle."

She sank back into her pillow with relief. "It will be soon. I have days left at best. I... I want him to be called Morgan. Can you make sure he names him Morgan?"

That made me feel wretched. Once, back in the human realm, when I had been busy considering ending my own pregnancy, my best friend had bought a book of names and called dibs on the name Morgan. I had never needed Zoe as much as I did standing by Sorcha's bed casually discussing what would happen after her death. "Of course," I said hoarsely.

"I'm tired," she said abruptly. "Leave me."

She choked out a sob as I moved away from the bed.

"I dare not leave her side for long," Blue Eyes whispered as we walked to the door. "Will you come back tomorrow?"

I agreed, although I was still reeling from the conversation I had just had with Sorcha. I had never seen her so vulnerable yet so determined. She was bravely facing her own death to save her unborn son, and I couldn't help admiring her, despite how manipulated I felt. She had broken the mould completely, turned her back on her own kind, and embraced a love she had discovered all on her own. Brendan was right about the fae; they were capable of as much love as humans.

"Why isn't Drake here?" I whispered.

"He's repulsed by the sickness and pregnancy. I advised him to convince Sorcha to end the pregnancy early on, but she refused, and I now know why. She's confided in me, but she's forbidden me from revealing the truth to him." She sighed. "But he must know she's dying. She's so lonely here, and I wish he'd visit her more often, if only to scare off those damned banshees. They terrify me sometimes."

"I'll be back," I said, "but if you need me at any time, just send for me."

Rumble and I left the room then, and the banshees skulked back into the bedroom.

In our room, I paced.

"Be wary," Rumble said. "You're getting in between a king and queen in their own court. And if you're there for the birth, you may be blamed for her death."

I clenched my fists. "What the hell is he thinking, ignoring her so that she has to beckon me? He didn't show up for Scarlet's birthday or Anya's wedding because of his sick wife, but it turns out he's avoiding the hell out of her! What a little—"

"Are you angry on Sorcha's behalf, or yours?"

"I don't know! Both of us! All of us! Scarlet's missing out, and Sorcha's convinced that this little boy will miss out, too. She's prepared to send him to my court. Mine! She hates me. That says a lot for the way she's been treated here. I mean, I had some idea, but I didn't think it was this bad."

A knock sounded at the door. Enraged, I opened it and barked out a "What?" to Drake, who stood there looking confused.

"I only came to ask if you wanted to join me for breakfast and a tour of my lands. Perhaps, later, Sorcha will be well enough to see you."

My fists balled, and without thinking, I punched him right in the nose.

He immediately dropped his King Drake act and held his face, looking at me in horror. "What the hell do you think you're doing, Cara? You could have broken my nose!"

"I wish I had!" I hissed.

Rumble pulled me away from the doorway. Drake stormed in and slammed the door behind him.

"What's up with you?" He grabbed a napkin and wiped a drop of blood from his nose.

I should have hit him harder. "I already went to see Sorcha," I managed to snarl through clenched teeth. "How could you treat her this way? And Scarlet! And even Arlen, who saved your bloody arse. You couldn't make time for the wedding or the birthday party because you were too busy looking after Sorcha, but it turns out you haven't been looking after her at all. Nobody has! Except for the Miacha _I_ sent here. Your wife is dying, you idiot! And she called me here because she's terrified of dying alone, terrified that someone will murder her son while she's lying there dying in her bed."

"Cara, you don't understand—"

"I do understand! You're a selfish moron, and she's up there suffering because of it."

"You hate the banshee," he snapped. "What do you care?"

"I care because I'm a human being with a heart and a soul! This isn't helping anyone, and if you don't cop on, next time I'll make Rumble hit you instead of me. I guarantee your nose will break then!"

"Get out! Get out of my home before I lose my temper. You don't get to come here and dictate to me!"

"Somebody has to! You've lost the run of yourself. The rest of us are doing whatever we can to stop the blight, and you're in here pretending nothing is wrong. 'Oh, let's go on a tour.' Are you for real? Face up to the facts! The realm is dying, Sorcha is dying, and you've yet to man up and help with either of those situations! And if we don't find Dagda's cup soon, then—" I stopped, appalled.

Drake, Silver king and father of my child, had collapsed into a chair and covered his eyes. "I know," he said in a shaky voice. "I know."

"Then what are you going to do about it?"

"I don't want to see her die. And if I leave, they could kill her anyway." He looked up at me, his eyes filled with tears. "Please, help me."

# Chapter 8

The Silver Court was by far the most fucked up of all three courts. My place was a paradise in comparison. Drake had been sacrificing subjects, Sorcha had been hiding in her room, and nobody seemed to know for sure if she was even pregnant. I picked up all that and more by the following afternoon.

Rumble and I wandered outside, stared at by various members of court as we walked. We were the darkness in the court of light, yet we were the most normal creatures in it. We walked to the clifftop together, shivering against the bracing winds that blew hard so high above the sea.

"It's hard to imagine two sisters living in opposite castles just glaring at each other," I said. "Not to mention trying to outdo each other with the weather."

"They were raised as rivals," he said. "Two sick little girls in a rotting court."

I rubbed my arms. "I dread to think how our children will see each other. Setanta already hates Lily."

"He'll grow up. And he'll be forced to kneel at her feet eventually."

"I wish I didn't have to force anyone."

"You knew what you were doing when you brought her to court. It comes with risks, but it's the safest place for her."

I glanced at him. "Do you agree with my decision?"

He guided me back from the edge as a particularly strong gust hit us. "I think that some people are more inclined to take home injured birds than others. I... appreciate the fact that you leave no one behind."

I shielded my eyes as I gazed outward at the castle where Drake had once lived separate from Sorcha. "I used to think Drake was that way. He saved me for no reason at all when we first met."

"Everyone has reasons."

I looked at Rumble in surprise; he was no fan of Drake. "I don't even recognise him anymore."

"You always tell us that power corrupts."

"What if it's not the power?" I turned my back on the Seelie castle. "What if it's something in the blood? The blood of Sadler, Deorad. Scarlet has their blood, too. What if she grows up to be a queen who sacrifices her subjects to please the god of death?"

"Scarlet isn't a daughter of death. She's a daughter of Brighid, if anything."

"Then where is Brighid?" I asked angrily. "Where is she when the realm is dying?" I strode back the way we'd come.

Rumble caught up to me. "We could go home. This court does nothing good for your mood."

"I promised Sorcha I'd stay."

"I don't understand why."

I sighed. "Neither do I. Once or twice, I thought maybe we could move past the bad feeling between us. It just hasn't happened that way."

"You don't owe her anything."

"Maybe not, but we owe our children. Why shouldn't Scarlet know her half brother? And if the cost is making a few promises to her stepmother, then I'll gladly pay it." I picked flowers on the way back. "And I truly pity Sorcha. She has what everyone seems to think I wanted, and I couldn't be more repulsed by her life."

"You have your own problems." He plucked a red flower that was out of my reach. "Did you know that Bart had left?"

"He told me he was leaving and urged me to do the same."

"Why?"

"He said there's no way to get rid of Chaos forever, that it would be better to seal the portals and save the human realm instead."

"Save _you_ instead," Rumble said.

I patted his arm. "You're so much smarter than everyone else, Rumble."

He smiled. "Not smart. Observant. He watched you too often to be anything but obsessed with you, and if he wasn't trying to kill you, then he must have been trying to save you."

"He's gone. There's no point talking about him anymore." I returned my attention to the flowers, unable to process exactly how I felt about Bart now that I knew the truth.

"The little woman is hanging out of a window to try and get your attention," Rumble said after a moment.

I looked up in surprise. Blue Eyes was indeed halfway out a window, waving at me. I waved back. "I meant to bring these flowers to Sorcha anyway."

We hurried inside and up the stairs to Sorcha's quarters. Blue Eyes was waiting at the door, anxiously hopping from one foot to the other. "It's starting."

"How far along are we?"

"Not long," the Miacha said. "But perhaps you could fetch the king?"

"Will do." I checked on Sorcha first. She finally had some colour in her cheeks.

"Can I get you anything?" I asked.

She shook her head, looking miserable. "It hurts. You're not as weak as I thought, human."

I smiled. "I'll be back soon."

Her eyes closed as she began to doze off. "I'll go get him now," I promised Blue Eyes.

Rumble and I raced to Drake's quarters after a servant told us he wasn't holding court. I banged on his door until he opened it, looking bleary eyed. He stank of sour wine.

"It's happening," I said, deciding to ignore his appearance. "Sorcha's in labour. You're needed."

"Needed? For what?"

"Support?" I said, baffled by his reticence. "Labour is pretty freaking scary, Drake."

He avoided my gaze. "You gave birth in a forest. She's in a castle. What could she possibly need me for?"

I gazed at him, aghast. "You dick."

"Don't," he said warningly.

"I don't know why I waste my time. You may have been pretending to be cold before, Drake, but now you're frozen for real."

I turned on my heel and headed back to my room to change. I needed to be comfortable if I was going to support through childbirth a woman who hated me.

Back at Sorcha's quarters, Drake was sitting on a comfortable chair in the hallway, reading a book, his bodyguards surrounding him. I shot him a brief look of disgust before going inside. Before I shut the door, Sorcha let out a screech of agony, and Drake visibly flinched. I slammed the door and hurried to the bed.

"Just cool her down with some wet cloths," Blue Eyes said. "Everyone else has abandoned me."

"Banshees hate childbirth," Sorcha said with a cackle. Sweat rolled freely from her temples. "They'll kill my son in his crib."

"I won't let them," I said, but she turned her face away from me. "She's so hot," I whispered. "She's feverish."

"If you could open the window," Blue Eyes said. "That might help."

I moved to the window and swung it open. A bitter wind gust blasted me back. The sky was darkening, a storm setting in. I looked over at Rumble by the door. "Ask them for ice or something cold for her."

He was gone for a while, but he came back with chips of ice that Sorcha happily crunched on through the pain. She wasn't just experiencing labour pains; she was in the throes of death. I could almost see the life leaving her every time a contraction hit. Death was a shadow in the corner, looming larger with every contraction.

"Does Brendan hate me?" Sorcha panted.

"Of course not," I said. "He's worried for you."

"He was always soft," she said darkly. "I resented him for it, but— _Oh_ , this pain will end me before the babe will."

"You can do it."

But by the time night fell and the first of the rain set in, I wasn't sure if Sorcha would live long enough to give birth.

She sobbed and reached for my hand. "Don't let them kill him."

"I won't. I'll keep your son safe."

"My husband," she said, gasping for relief. "Don't let them kill _Drake_."

My heart chipped a little at her desperation. "You have nothing to worry about. Brendan and I will protect him as best we can."

She looked at me sadly. "It'll always be you two against him. You dug your claws into Brendan before he left Drake's body. My husband doesn't stand a chance."

"It doesn't have to be that way."

Her nails pierced my flesh. "You don't understand his pain. You've never understood his suffering. He needs someone to keep him healthy, to stop him from—"

Her eyes closed, and her limp hand fell from mine.

"Sorcha?" I shook her. " _Sorcha_!"

Blue Eyes leaned over and slapped Sorcha's cheeks. "Wake up," she whispered. "Wake up, my dear."

"You can't take her yet!" I shouted at an unseen god. "You made a deal!"

The banshee gasped and opened her eyes. "The realm is dying." She arched her back as another pain hit. "I can feel it dying with me. So much death. It's not a beautiful death. None of this is the way it should be." She gripped my hand so tight that my fingers grew numb. "I pity you having to watch the realm die like this. I'll welcome you all to the Nether soon enough."

"She's delirious," I said.

"I know." Worry laced Blue Eyes's voice. "Her body is killing her."

"There has to be a way to save her."

"Death comes, and Death takes," Sorcha said, laughing. "Death is the only winner in the end." She let out a scream that cracked and broke, and still her mouth hung open in a silent cry, her eyes wide with terror.

Blue Eyes moved the blanket, revealing bloody sheets beneath Sorcha. She propped Sorcha's legs up and used her hands to inspect her. "The baby's breech. That makes our job that much harder."

I rolled up my sleeves, trying not to focus on the bluish colour of Sorcha's skin, how skeletal her limbs had become.

"Father's here," she whispered to me. "Father's waiting for me, beckoning me to him."

"Tell him to go away!" I brushed away a tear. "You have to see your son first, right?"

She looked at me then. "I _want_ to see him. Can I see him?"

I clasped her hand. "Stay with me long enough, and you will. Fight it, Sorcha. Maybe we can win this time."

"You can't win every battle." She panted. "But there's a peace waiting for us. Someday soon, none of this will matter."

I found the way she was speaking disturbing, and I moved away to help Blue Eyes instead. I cleaned some of the blood away, hoping my stomach stayed steady. There was a lot of blood, just as the prophetic mirror had shown me. I shuddered at the memory and kept going, determined not to give up.

The contractions appeared to slow, but when one hit, Sorcha screamed as if her skin were being peeled away, one strip at a time. Even my gums hurt, my nerves were so tight.

Blue Eyes pulled me away from the bed. "I can't save her, Cara. You must prepare yourself for the worst."

"The baby?"

"I don't know if I can safely remove the baby. Her body is fighting it."

"What do we do?"

"I'll have to cut her. She's already lost so much blood that this will likely kill her before her god decides to take her. Will you tell her the risks? Explain it to her?"

I nodded, but I really wanted to run. "I'll be right back," I promised. "I just need a minute."

"Get some air," she said. "I need the child to move farther down the birth canal first."

I left the room and found Drake still sitting in his chair. He stared at my bloody hands in horror.

"Are you comfortable there?" I asked. "Are you at ease? Go inside and help her! You won't get another chance."

"It's not my place to be in that room."

"Of course it's your place! Did she make the child alone? Drake, she's dying, and we might not be able to save the baby. Talk to her before it's too late."

"No." He looked down at his book.

"You make me sick. If it weren't for you, she'd live to see tomorrow."

The book shook in his hands, but he refused to look at me. I stormed back into the room, my heart aching with rage and sorrow and regret. He had told me once that death terrified him, that he couldn't cope with it, but how could he sit outside the room and listen to Sorcha scream without saying one word to her?

Furious, I sat next to Sorcha.

"He won't come," she said. "He told me he would remember what I did to you both, that he'd never let me forget. Oh, how I wish I had never set eyes on your face, Cara Kelly. You've been the ruin of me."

"Sorcha. Concentrate. The baby seems to be stuck. Blue Eyes will have to hurt you to get the baby out, and—"

"As if I care any for pain," she scoffed. She stretched out her arms. "I'm a daughter of death. I suffer now to—" She screamed as a contraction ripped through her body.

"Push," I urged. "Push the pain away and keep going. The baby will die if you don't keep pushing."

"Not him." She wasn't looking at me anymore. "You promised. Me for him. It was a true deal."

"Push!" Blue Eyes commanded.

Sorcha let out a little cry as she bore down. Blood flooded the bed, and my stomach sank. She couldn't last much longer. Loving her child was killing her.

Blue Eyes had ordered boiling water, and when it arrived, she told Sorcha to brace herself. Sorcha bit on a leather belt and clutched my hands as Blue Eyes quickly dipped a knife in the water then sliced Sorcha open to give the baby more room. Sorcha groaned, but she was too weak to scream.

"Doesn't hurt so much anymore," she whispered to me after letting the belt fall from her lips.

"One more push," Blue Eyes said.

"Push," I said, holding Sorcha's gaze. "He's almost here."

She bore down with the last of her strength, her fingers limp in mine. Blue Eyes gripped the baby's feet and pulled him free. She immediately wrapped him up and handed him to me while she did her best to stop the bleeding. But Sorcha was fading fast in a bed of her own blood.

Her eyes were closed, and if it weren't for the shallow breath lifting her chest, I would have thought her dead already.

"Meet your son," I said, and her eyes flickered open.

I placed the baby in her arms, and she made a sound of surprise. "Morgan." She kissed his forehead. Then she said, "Take him. Take him away from Death before it takes him, too."

I held him in my arms. His head was covered in a cowl, and his face was stained, but he looked perfectly healthy, despite his traumatic birth. Sorcha watched him in my arms with a dazed smile.

"He looks like you." I smiled at her, but her gaze was empty and unseeing. "She's gone." I felt sick.

Blue Eyes stopped moving and looked at Sorcha. "There was no hope." She wiped her cheek against her sleeve. "I'll wash up then check on the child. You should probably tell... someone that their queen is dead."

I held the child and staggered to the door. Rumble held his hand under my elbow to support me at the door. A group of fae were gathered outside, Drake among them.

"The queen is dead," I said. "But you have a prince. She named him Morgan."

All the fae knelt at my feet—except for Drake, who stared at me with blank eyes. I turned my back on him and went inside. Blue Eyes took the baby to clean him and check him over. I washed my own hands then started to clean Sorcha. What a waste of life.

Drake came into the room and stared at her body and the blood-stained sheets on the floor. He opened his mouth as if to speak.

"Don't you dare," I said fiercely. "You didn't come when she needed you, when she was desperately scared and alone. You abandoned her. You don't get to come in here and look at her when she doesn't need you anymore."

"Are you talking about her—or you?" he asked, his words slurred.

"Get out," I snapped. "Sober up before you come in here."

He stumbled out of the room. I carried on, my hands shaking.

"He's suffering, too," Blue Eyes said. "He just has a different way of dealing."

"She needed him, and he just deserted her because he's a coward. She should have tricked Brendan into marrying her. At least he wouldn't have let her die alone like that."

"She wasn't alone," Blue Eyes chided. "She had us, and she got to see her baby."

"She hated me." I took the child from her as he started to cry. "We need a wet nurse for him. He could share Lily's, but what do I do until then?"

"There must be someone with milk in the castle," she said. "I'll go find out."

I sat on a chair next to Sorcha, thoroughly exhausted. It could have been me in that deathbed, and maybe that was why I felt such a searing pain in my chest. Or perhaps it was the motherless little boy in my arms. I sighed as I looked down at Sorcha's son. His hair was a single tuft of black on his crown, and his eyes hadn't really opened yet. I wondered if he would look anything like my daughter.

"Poor little guy," I cooed. "Everything's already messed up for you." I kissed his forehead. "Don't worry. I'll look out for you. You have a sister who's going to love you. It's going to be okay." I shushed him as he cried. "Everything's going to be okay."

The banshees came to deal with Sorcha's body, throwing looks of disdain at little Morgan.

"He's under my protection," I warned.

"We want nothing with him," one said, the sneer on her face matching the one Sorcha had once worn, before she had discovered how to care.

I was relieved when Blue Eyes returned with a wet nurse from the kitchens, Vanys, who had been weaning her own child.

"I'll come with you to your court," she said. "For the right coin."

"You'll be paid well, but what about your own child?" I asked.

"She'll stay here with the old women. Too old to be coddled by me now."

With that attitude, I was glad she wouldn't be needed for long.

We stayed in the castle for two more days, but Drake never came to see the baby. I took care of Morgan because of the promises I had made to Sorcha, but I quickly grew frustrated and eager to leave. The Silver Court was the most depressing place in the realm, and while the courtiers pretended to grieve, the king stayed out of sight. I just wanted to get away.

Blue Eyes helped me organise some loyal Silver subjects to accompany us to the Darkside. Sorcha may not have been popular, but she had provided something important—an heir. At least her child was wanted amongst most of the court.

"I'll have to let Drake know I'm taking Morgan with me," I told Rumble. "Keep an eye on the baby. I won't be long."

Rumble was reluctant to let me go alone, but I was insistent.

"Maybe I can talk some sense into him," I said. "He's still in there somewhere, trapped behind that stupid crown."

I hurried to Drake's room, but when he didn't answer my first couple of knocks, I let myself in.

"Drake?"

I heard water running in the bathroom and knocked on that door. "Drake, are you in there?"

When I didn't hear a reply, I got worried and pushed the door open. Drake was sitting in the shower, letting the water run over his head. I could smell the alcohol from the door.

"Get up, you idiot." I switched off the tap. "What are you doing? You have a court to run, children to get to know!" He let me pull him to his feet. I wrapped his dressing gown around him and helped him into his bedroom. He tightened his arms around me, pressing me close to his wet, naked chest.

"It's over. I'm free." But his voice wobbled, and I knew he was upset.

"There's no such thing as a free king," I said, breaking away from his embrace.

"My wife is dead. I'm here for the taking."

"Stop that!"

He tried to kiss me, but I pushed him away, and he stumbled.

"What's stopping you now?" he said loudly. "Isn't this what you wanted? You hated me for marrying her, for deserting you when you needed me, and now it's over. I'm back. What's the problem this time?"

I shoved him toward the bed so hard that he slipped and fell. He sprawled on the ground, drunker than anyone I had ever seen. "Stay with me," he pleaded, grabbing my ankles. "I swear she comes to me at night to keep taking my sins away. I see her ghost. I hear her voice. Stay with me. Help me send her away."

"Stop it, Drake!" I helped him up. "Get on the bed."

He obeyed, to my relief. He fell rather than lay down, and he clutched at his stomach as though in pain.

I pulled the covers over him. "You _should_ feel guilty. But this isn't the answer. Sorcha made me promise to take Morgan away from here because she feared for him. So I'm doing that today, okay? I'm taking your son to my court to stay with my daughters for a while. When you can cope again, when you're feeling better... you can come and take him home. For now, he's better off away from here. It's not safe yet."

He nodded glumly. "Scarlet can be my heir now. You can send her back to me instead of the boy. I don't want him."

"Don't say that! Scarlet is _never_ going to be your heir. I'm going home, and we're going to keep searching for Dagda's cup. And when we find it, we're going to need you to man up and come with us."

"Why? What could you possibly need me for?"

I felt like stamping my feet in frustration. "We're going to beat the god of Chaos, remember? We need all four treasures, and you and me and Brendan have to use them together." I held his hand. "I'm sorry I was angry with you. I know you care about Sorcha. I know you're only sad that she's dead, but—"

He covered his ears with his hands.

"Drake." I pulled his hands away and sat on the bed. "It's okay to feel. It's okay to be upset. You need time to grieve, and we'll give it to you, but you can't just drink yourself into oblivion and push everyone else away. That's not good for you."

"Then stay with me. I need you."

"You never needed me. And I never needed you. We were foolish, and we've paid the price."

"Don't love him," he whispered, his voice choked up. "Not him, Cara. Anyone but him. I can't bear it."

I sighed heavily. "Drake, you need to sleep, and I need to go. Promise me you'll be at her funeral. Promise it."

He nodded, and his eyes filled with tears.

I was able to pity him, and that was easier than anger somehow. "Good. Goodbye, Drake, and I'm sorry for your loss."

I left him there alone so I could take his son away with me.

# Chapter 9

Vanys struggled to feed the baby. I stared out the window as Morgan whimpered, out at the Great Forest which was in an even poorer state than it had been when we'd arrived at the Silver Court.

When Sorcha had sent a message asking me to come, I hadn't had any idea of what would happen next. I never imagined taking yet another child into the Darksider nursery. I could only hope there was news on Dagda's cup by the time I returned, and that Drake would have recovered when we needed his help. Because I believed Bart. For the first time, I had seen honesty in his eyes, and it had been when he'd explained how the treasures worked. We could put the god of Chaos back in his box, but would that be enough? There had to be a way to truly defeat him.

Morgan's whimpers turned into a full-blown new baby cry, and I sighed at the wet nurse's panicked expression. She was absolutely clueless. I didn't know how she had cared for her own child, but she looked at Morgan as if he were some kind of alien.

"Give him to me," I said, holding out my arms.

She handed me the boy. I stared down at him, trying to find resemblances between him and my own child. He was just a sweet little innocent, like any newborn, and his mother was already dead. Pity burned in my chest, and I held him tighter and whispered in his ear until he fell asleep from the rocking of the carriage.

While he slept, I handed him back to Vanys with a smile. "There's something about new babies. Impossible not to fall in love with them."

Her noncommittal grunt made me roll my eyes. I couldn't wait to get Morgan home to Lily's wet nurse, Penny, who treated every child as though it were her own.

"You seem restless," Blue Eyes said, yawning as she woke up from a nap.

"I am. I might ride Dubh for a while. Will you be all right with the baby?"

She patted my arm. "We'll manage just fine. Go, get it out of your system."

I waved at Rumble out the window, and he slowed the carriage so I could get out and ride Dubh. I was stiff from sitting all day.

Dubh had been rambling alongside the carriages, and he snorted eagerly when I mounted him to gallop ahead for a while. Rumble joined me, and we raced lengths up and down the road, making sure we stayed close to the carriages. The hound loped around us in lazy strides.

Suddenly, he stopped and froze, his body tensing. His lips curled into a snarl, and he looked anything but a pup. He dashed off, refusing to come back when I called. Dubh's nostrils flared, and he galloped after the cú sídhe. I gripped the reins tightly, barely holding on. Rumble followed, but he couldn't keep up.

Dubh continued until we came to a small camp. A scout sat there, caught completely unawares. He wore no obvious colours, and by the look on his face, he wasn't happy to see a Darksider. He gazed at us for less than five seconds before making a run for it. But he ran straight into Tris, who growled, the hair rising on the back of his neck. In the darkness, he looked like a monster.

"Who are you?" I demanded, getting off Dubh's back.

Rumble caught up and dismounted, aiming his sword at the scout's neck.

"Nobody," the slight faery said. "Nobody at all."

"Then why did you run?"

"Woods are dangerous," he said, his eyes darting in every direction.

"You're not wearing the colours of any court," Rumble said.

At that, the scout's eyes gleamed. "Not yet."

"Who is your master?" my bodyguard demanded.

"MacKenzie." The scout held up his chin. "He's coming to fetch his daughter with his new wife."

"New wife? That was quick," I said. "Who is she?"

"Donella, the leanan sídhe," was his proud reply.

I burst out laughing. I couldn't help it. I should have guessed the answer would be just that ridiculous. "Best of luck to both of them."

"How many troops is MacKenzie bringing to take his daughter?" Rumble asked, and I sobered.

The scout sneered at me. "All of them will face the pretenders."

I strode over to him, my dagger aimed at his groin. "How far behind are they?"

"I don't know. How could I know? I'm scouting ahead for danger. That's all."

"Days or hours?" I asked.

"Hours." He spat at my feet.

Rumble sank his sword into the faery's neck. The scout gurgled and was dead within seconds, his eyes wide with surprise. The cú sídhe sniffed the body but decided on picking at the scout's dinner instead.

"That was a little hasty," I said. "He might have had more information."

"We know what we need to. Our enemies have joined forces, and they are currently marching on us. MacKenzie's armies far exceed our own."

"Why would they do this now? The entire realm is busy trying to fix the blight!"

"That's exactly why they do this now."

"But Bart said MacKenzie doesn't act on the behalf of Chaos. Why would he...he also said they bring Chaos without even meaning to. And that he would use Chaos if he needed power. What better way to feed his god and gain power than with a war against the person fighting against Chaos?"

"Then his daughter is a ruse. He comes only to take what's yours. Perhaps you should have married him."

I shivered at the thought. "He and Donella are the perfect match."

"If his troops are advancing, they'll catch up to our carriages. You must ride ahead on Dubh."

"The baby," I said, suddenly terrified. "Donella wants that child dead. They could practically disable two courts in one attack. And Brendan's still at my castle!"

"You see how clever this play is?"

"The people we took with us will die. I can't ride ahead on Dubh."

"Take the child." He mounted his own horse. "Ride for our castle and warn our people. Despite his army, it's harder to take a castle than to defend it. I will escort these people to the home of the Miacha and seek refuge there. Then I will ride back to the Silver Court and warn them, too. We could flank MacKenzie's army with the Silver's."

I paced in front of him. "It'll be too dangerous for you, Rumble. You could run right into the army."

"It's easier to hide one man than two. But it's risky for both of us. There could be other scouts ahead. You yourself could run straight into trouble."

"Dubh can outrun anything." But Rumble's horse couldn't. He might not even make it all the way to the Darkside on his weary stallion. "Fine," I said. "When you reach the Miacha, ask them to send word to all three courts in case one of us fails. When you reach the Silver Court, have them send word to the Darkside and the Green Court, and when I get home, I'll send word to Silver and Green. At least one message should get through in time."

We agreed on the plan then raced back to the carriages to tell the others what was happening. We had two daoine sídhe and some servants. Too many to hide, too few to protect us.

"Rumble doesn't need to escort us," Blue Eyes said as Vanys tried to give Morgan one last desperate feed. "I can hide these people with my sisters."

I glanced at Rumble, who nodded. "Fine," I said. "Just hurry, and send word to all of the courts when you get home in case Rumble and I don't make it."

"Best of luck to you," she said. "The leanan sídhe would make a terrible queen."

She helped me strap the baby to my chest. "As tight as you can," I said. "It'll keep him warm and secure, and hopefully, I won't drop him."

"His cries may give you away."

"Dubh will just have to beat his record for getting home," I said, forcing confidence into my voice.

Soon, it was time to separate. Rumble went back the way he'd come, disappearing into the woods. The Miacha led the others down a stream, all of them walking barefoot in the water in case MacKenzie's cú sídhe were hunting in the woods.

And I rode straight for the Hollows on a faery horse, with a faery prince strapped to my chest, and a faery dog running next to us. I looked up and saw a crow flying off toward the Darkside. Pity they couldn't talk.

When I reached the top of the valley before the Hollow Hills, I looked back on the Great Forest. Thousands of lights lit a warning, some of them too close for comfort. There was a chance some of MacKenzie's army was ahead of us, too. For a brief instant, I wondered how we hadn't received word of the army's approach, but MacKenzie probably had hunting parties cutting down witnesses and messengers.

We pushed on, reaching the Hollows. Morgan's whimpers echoed in the air, and I slowed Dubh.

"There's an army coming!" I cried out. "Stay hidden. They are our enemies!" I wasn't sure how much the deformed creatures in the Hollows could understand, but hopefully, they would survive the pillaging of a travelling army.

Dubh raced on, Tris somehow managing to keep up. We raced through the forest as dawn broke, and I prayed we would come across some of our own soldiers. I was exhausted, and the baby was hungry and restless. Dubh was sweating and panting, struggling at the pace I kept urging him to keep. Tris moved silently, and I wondered how much further he could go.

The woods were quiet, too quiet. Dubh's ears kept pricking up, and I knew something was out there. We were so close to home that I could see the towers of the castle in the distance through gaps in the trees. The baby stirred again, eager for a feed. I shushed him, praying he would keep quiet just a little while longer.

Tris grew tense and kept closer to us, while Dubh slowed to make less noise. I held my breath, realising something was near. But what, exactly?

My skin prickled with anticipation, but I didn't hear anything approaching. And then the baby let out an awful wail. Almost instantly, a howl sounded close by. The howl of a cú sídhe. To my horror, Tris sent out an echoing howl. If the hunting dogs hadn't realised where we were before, they certainly did then. Dubh broke into a desperate gallop, but I had seen how easily Tris kept up to my horse. The dogs were fast.

The baby kept crying, making us a moving target. Cú sídhe crashed through the undergrowth after us, rapidly gaining on us as they followed our trail.

I held onto the reins with one hand and a knife with the other, praying the ties securing the baby to my chest would hold. We would have to fight our way home, we would likely fail, and I couldn't figure out a way to save the child that had been entrusted to me. Donella had wanted him dead since she'd learned of his conception, and now she had a new husband with a massive army to help her. I could only hope that the others made it to their destinations in time.

We raced on, the sun slowly moving higher in the sky. Sweat dripped down my back. Morgan's face was bright red with hunger and upset. The growls behind us grew louder by the minute.

They came at us from both sides, two massive hounds circling to block our escape. One leapt to take a bite out of Dubh's haunch. He jumped and kicked back, knocking a cú sídhe in the face before its teeth could sink into his flesh. Tris let out a terrifying sound then fearlessly dove straight for the animals. Dubh whirled around in a circle, the whites of his eyes showing in his panic. Both of MacKenzie's dogs were larger than Tris, who was still practically a pup, albeit a large one, and they dove at my dog as one.

He was thrown on his back, snapping and snarling as one of the pair went for his throat.

"Dubh, help him!" I cried. If they killed the dog, they would just come after us, and Dubh was exhausted. We wouldn't make it home. We had to fight and hope for the best.

Dubh jumped and stomped at the attacking dogs. One separated from the fight to come at us while Tris struggled with the other. Blood splatters decorated the grass and fallen leaves, and my poor pup struggled against his attacker.

The second dog looked more like an oversized feral wolf as he went for Dubh's legs, biting as Dubh screamed and bucked to kick him off. Then the baby cried again, and the dog looked up instead. He released Dubh and leapt up, right for the child.

I tried to shield the baby with my arms. The cú sídhe sank its teeth into my forearm, almost pulling me off the horse as he fell to the earth. I didn't know how I kept my seat. I held out my knife to ward the animal off as it leapt again and again, reckless in its blood frenzy. Dubh spun around, kicking outward as he tried to keep the dog away from us. Finally, the dog succeeded in leaping for the baby again, but my knife was in just the right position to slice him from mouth to chest. Dubh bucked, knocking the dog to the ground. The creature whimpered, attempting to crawl away as it bled out. Dubh stomped on the dog's head until it stopped moving.

I shivered as adrenalin pumped through my body. The baby's shawl was covered in blood, and he kept crying, but he seemed unharmed. Tris was losing the fight against the larger cú sídhe, but Dubh interfered, giving Tris a chance to get back on his feet. Dubh kicked the larger dog in the gut, and the hound attacked Dubh instead, viciously sinking his fangs into Dubh's leg. I couldn't reach them with a blade, couldn't get off the horse without risking the baby, but Tris managed to jump on the back of the dog. The dog's jaws released Dubh, who promptly stood on the animal and held it there, even as it ripped the flesh from his foreleg. Taking advantage of the distraction, Tris tore out the animal's throat.

It was over. It was done. But our injuries meant we couldn't run anymore. Dubh limped on, and Tris looked as though he might collapse at any minute. The pain in my arm intensified as the rush of battle left me.

"We just have to get home," I whispered. "We're almost home."

Soldiers were behind us, tracking their hounds. I heard them come after us, and I ignored them. I had to. We kept moving, kept trying to reach home. It was too late, but we didn't stop. We couldn't stop, couldn't give up.

And then the sounds came from in front of us. I was too weary to think about anything but what a shame it was that we would lose so close to home.

A streak of white flew past me, but before I could figure out what it was, a group of soldiers came into view. They wore black and surrounded us protectively. My people had found us. I looked over my shoulder and saw the enemy burst through the clearing, but my soldiers blocked their way.

Donncha raced past me, shouting something incomprehensible.

"You're hurt," Brendan said. I hadn't even recognised him. "A baby!" he exclaimed. "Cara?"

I blinked a couple of times, trying to come to my senses, but the fight behind us was a distracting reminder of the hounds' attack.

Morgan mewled sorrowfully, and I recalled my mission. "MacKenzie and Donella are on their way. Be careful of the cú sídhe."

"Get her back to the castle," Brendan called out to Bran, whom I noticed for the first time.

"I'm fine," I said. "I can get back."

"Bran will help you," he said, touching my cheek. "I have to help your soldiers here."

Bran helped me get off the horse as Brendan raced into the fray. He called for another soldier to lead Dubh home. "Throw the hound on the saddle," he commanded. "The poor thing did its job."

I looked back at the fight as Bran helped me onto his horse with him. Issy, the white cú sídhe, was amongst the fighters, even more ferocious than Tris. The baby kept crying, and Bran rode quickly away from the danger.

I was so exhausted, my eyes began to close of their own accord. Dubh limped home behind us, but Bran refused to slow down.

"I'm sorry to rush you when you're exhausted, but I may need to get back out there," he said.

"How did the messenger reach you so fast?" I asked, yawning.

"There was no messenger. The crows were acting strange, and Vix convinced the king that it meant trouble. Then the white dog howled and raced away as if there was a war going on, so a group of us followed to investigate. And we found you, half dead, with a baby."

"Don't overreact. I'm not half dead."

"Half asleep then," he teased. "What's with the baby though?"

"It's Drake's son. Sorcha died in childbirth. Before that, she asked me to take him away from her court, to keep him safe. And Drake wasn't... himself, so I did. I left with Rumble, one of the Miacha, two daoine sídhe, and a couple of Silver Court servants. We found a scout who told us that MacKenzie married Donella and was on his way to my castle with his entire army. We all separated and headed for different places in the hope one of us could warn all the courts of the danger." I heaved a sigh. "I really thought I was going to get the baby killed."

"It was close, but you made it. That'll be some scar on your arm though."

I looked down at my arm. The wound was nasty, and more than just blood oozed out of it. The black stain of the blight was there, too. I concentrated on looking straight ahead. Seeing the castle felt like coming home.

"I'm just lucky I had Dubh and Tris," I said, trying my best to hide the trembling of my lower lip as I held on to the baby. We had both come too close to death.

We were greeted at the gates by many surprised Darksiders who looked horrified by my wound—and puzzled by the appearance of yet another child.

"Back off," Bran called out. "We need to get her inside so she can rest."

"I need to warn everyone first," I said. "Somebody fetch the wet nurse for this poor child."

Inside, Polly took Morgan without question and fed him while I updated the waiting court members.

"The child is Morgan, Prince of the Silver Court," I announced. "Before she passed away, not long after giving birth to him, Queen Sorcha asked me to bring the child here for a time, to be part of the royal nursery and get to know his sister. On the way home, we discovered that MacKenzie's army is on the move. He married the leanan sídhe, and now they want to take over the realm, starting with us."

Grey Eyes tended to my arm as I spoke. I ignored the pain as she cleaned the wound. "We need to prepare our defences, but if an army should break through, the children need to be protected at all costs. If there is a way to sneak them to the human realm without drawing attention from the encroaching army, then take it, but for now, it's best we lock down the castle's defences and prepare for a siege. Send word to the other courts, and somebody check on the portals in case MacKenzie has taken them, too. Rumble is still out there. Enquire of his safety from the Silver Court."

Leonora ran over to me and knelt at my feet, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I swear, I didn't know my father was going to do this. Forgive me, please."

"You couldn't have known," I said. "You're free to leave before he attacks, Leonora, you and Aiken."

"Let me stay here and marry Aiken," she blubbered. "Let me free myself of my father's name and join a new family. I'll pledge for you, and I swear I'll—"

"Leonora, I don't have time for this right now," I said impatiently. "You're free to do as you wish, but—"

"They're back!" somebody shouted from the door.

I pushed my way to the front doors to see if Brendan was all right. Most of the soldiers were bloodied but still in fighting condition.

Brendan found me in the crowd and held on to me. "You're all right?"

"I'm fine. I have to tell you something. I'm so sorry, but Sorcha died in childbirth."

His expression clouded. "The child is hers?"

"A boy. Morgan. She asked me to take him, to protect him."

"And Drake didn't protest?"

"He wasn't up to a whole lot when I left," I said under my breath.

"Didn't he—" He looked around at the crowd. "Right, we can discuss this later. The group we fought was just a team looking for their dogs. They're all dead. We managed to get one to talk before he died. He told us that MacKenzie plans on taking over the entire realm."

"You can't leave, unless you plan on avoiding his army and crossing the desert."

"I wasn't planning on leaving at all," he said, looking surprised. "I'm going to fight with your army. Not many of my soldiers are here, but we'll join your forces."

"What about your own court?"

He squeezed my shoulder. "I'm staying, Cara."

"Thank you. We've already organised warnings to the other courts."

Conn approached. "If you send word to Fiadh, she will give you however many soldiers she has with her."

"I banished her."

"You're still her queen."

"Send word if you want," I said. "I don't expect anything."

"How's your arm?" Brendan asked.

"Fine. Come on. We don't have much time. We have to make sure we're ready for his first attack. Somebody send my advisers to the meeting room. We need to plan our victory against MacKenzie!"

The crowds roared their approval, and I knew I had to keep acting as though I knew what the hell I was doing.

"Find whoever you want to attend the meeting," I said. "I'm going to put Morgan in the nursery and introduce him to Scarlet. I won't be long."

Brendan took my hand and held my gaze in one long, penetrating look. "I'm glad you're back."

I smiled then left him there, urging Lily's wet nurse to carry Morgan upstairs because my arm was injured. In the nursery, the children were playing together while Anya and Vix distracted them.

"This is Morgan," I said brightly. "He's a prince, and he's your half brother, Scarlet. Look, you have a little brother now."

The children cooed over the new baby, but I knelt in front of Setanta instead. He looked afraid.

"There's an army coming," I said under my breath. "We're going to leave soldiers with you during the battle, but if they say you have to sneak away, then do exactly as you are told. It's important. Now, I need you to keep the others happy and distracted when the sounds of a fight come to you. Can you do that?"

He nodded, looking more determined now.

"Good. I'm depending on you, Setanta. I want you to stay safe, too, okay?"

I left him and went down to a meeting that would need me to figure out what to do in a war. I had no idea. And I definitely didn't know if this coming battle was just a distraction to keep us from finding the final legendary treasure. But Chaos was going to learn he needed more than an army to stop our alliance.

# Chapter 10

The meeting room was full. Most of my advisers, some of Brendan's people, and a bunch of my friends were already waiting for me. Anya was watching over the children in the nursery along with Grey Eyes and Orlaith. Vix was with me, her eyes full of fear for Rumble.

"We'll get him back," I reassured her. "We _will_ hear from the Silver Court, and they'll tell us he's fine."

"And if that monster king decides to sacrifice him?"

The room fell silent. I took my seat, carefully debating my words. "That won't happen. Drake's not... in the position to sacrifice people to a god. The banshees have deserted him now that Sorcha is dead. And I'm almost certain that some of MacKenzie's army will cut off to attack Drake's castle. He'll desperately need Rumble to help him. We all have time. It's a massive army, but it moves slowly. Yes, there are bands riding separately, but that might work for us."

"We can pick off the isolated bands," Donncha said. "We know the land better than they do."

"Cara, tell us exactly what happened," Brendan said. "We need to make sure we haven't missed anything important."

I took a deep breath. "We waited a couple of days after Sorcha's death, but I wanted to get home, so we took some daoine sídhe, some servants, a wet nurse, and one of the Miacha with us. The wet nurse was having issues feeding Morgan, so we were rushing to get home." I looked at Vix. She kept clutching her hair as though she wanted to yank it right out of her scalp. "Rumble and I rode a little while the baby slept. The cú sídhe was with us. He heard something nearby, so we investigated. It was a scout travelling ahead of the main army, probably one of many."

"He told you about MacKenzie?" Arlen asked. "Are you sure it's the entire army?"

"I can't be certain. But he told us that MacKenzie had married Donella, and he was on his way to get his daughter. He was bringing his entire army with him because the realm was in the hands of pretenders. There are a couple of issues here. Donella is a sore point for all of us. She hates me, Brendan, and Drake, and she has supporters everywhere. MacKenzie was angry with me because I refused to marry him, but Bart warned me that MacKenzie was once a follower of Chaos." I met Brendan's gaze. "As was Yvette. MacKenzie killed her, likely to stop her from talking, but I offended him. I may have just pushed him back into the arms of his god. MacKenzie and Donella together? Big problem."

"We could send his daughter back to him," Fallon said.

"Dead or alive," his twin, Caellan, added.

"I'm not going to murder a guest."

Fallon frowned. "If she simply goes to him then—"

"Leonora doesn't want to go back to her father. Besides, this isn't about her," I said. "All MacKenzie wants is power. And the realm is in the perfect state for him to take over. The Silver Court just lost their queen, their heir is vulnerable, and their king is not... in good health. The Green Court is still getting back to normal, and their king is right here. Our court..." I sighed. "We're seen as weak. We have the smallest army, and the land is dying more rapidly here than anywhere else. We're still repairing the castle. I don't know how long we can hold out in a siege, and if there's an army and hunting hounds out there, it's too late to evacuate the vulnerable."

"We heard earlier that the portals are blocked," Rafe said. "MacKenzie couldn't have passed us to get to the one we use, so his people must have entered from the human realm."

"Which sounds like he was already prepared," Brendan said. "He's moved too quickly for this to be a scheme come up with at the spur of the moment."

"More likely that he planned for every event." Rafe ran his hands through his curly locks. "He won't back down easily."

"Let's hope a sinkhole opens up right beneath the bulk of his army then," Vix said harshly.

"We need to think about the fact that this could be a distraction," I said. "To stop us from seeking out the final treasure. We could be going up against the power of a god."

"I still hold the sword of victory," Brendan said. "And you have the spear of Lugh. With two legendary treasures, we must be unstoppable."

"And the Silver Court? The Green Court? How long will they last against MacKenzie's troops? If I was MacKenzie, I'd send a small force to infiltrate Drake's castle, then I'd come for me, wipe out the heirs, and either settle here to recover or march straight on to the Green Castle."

"You could abandon the castle," Brendan said gently. "I could lead an army to meet MacKenzie's, and the rest of you could flee."

"To where?" Vix asked.

"To the Watcher," Brendan said. "They won't know the path."

"I could lead a force into the marshes," Líle said shakily. "If I could lure MacKenzie after me, he would be lost forever."

"Nobody's going into the marshes," I said firmly. "And I'm not abandoning my castle."

"None of us will," Marron the builder said. "I can repair some old siege engines, maybe even come up with a few new methods of defence, but I'll need some time. If we can keep the army busy for a while, it would help."

"I'll lead anyone who wants to join me," Vix said fiercely. "We can hide in the trees and ambush small groups as they pass. We Darksiders were raised on guerrilla tactics."

"We need to know how long it'll take the main force of the army to get here," I said.

"We've sent messages everywhere we can think of," Bas, the tribesman chief, said. "We can wait for replies, but I'd rather head back out and gather support."

"The lights can give us an estimate," Donncha said. "A quick look from the tower told me the main force will reach the Hollows within two days."

"But it'll take forever for them to get _through_ the Hollows," I said. "It's too narrow for an army to pass." I clenched my fists on the arm of my chair. "Unless they're planning on building bridges to cross the river Garbh."

"That's what I would do," Brendan said. "A trained army would have no issues crossing that river with the right organisation, not now they're more familiar with the perils of the Darkside."

"We can't defend the entire length of the river." Vix knelt at my feet. "You know I don't ask you for things, but please, let me do this. Let me take soldiers and get rid of some of the smaller scouting groups and the hunters. I have to kill something, or I'll think about him."

I stroked her hair. "Only if you promise to return if there are too many of them."

Her face brightened. "I swear it. I'll leave tonight."

I gripped her hand as she rose to her feet. "Leave tomorrow, and I'll go with you."

The room grew loud with protestations, but Vix only had eyes for me. " _Yes_."

I turned to Brendan. "She's right. We need to pick off those small bands. They're gathering information for MacKenzie. We want him to come at us blind. If we clear the way, we can set up points of attack instead of waiting for him to lay siege. We can have a force at the Hollows, picking off those who try to pass. We can patrol the river for passable points and defend them if the army tries to cross. They'll be on the side of the desert. It's a weak point. We'll have the cover of trees on our side of the river. And we have the water fae. They'll make it harder to pass. If we take back the portals, we regain new supplies and communication. We can do this. We can make this fight fairer."

The others kept talking, arguing about time and logistics. "Send out scouts and messengers tonight," I said. "Tell them not to risk their lives. We have so much to do. If MacKenzie hasn't attacked, the other courts may be able to flank his army, or at least separate it, maybe even lure some of his forces to the landslides. But we still have to figure out a plan of action if they manage to break through, and let's face it, they have a massive army. All we'll do is slow them down, but it may give Marron time to improve our defences. Are you all with me?"

Brendan was the first to say yes, and I looked to him with grateful eyes. He stared back at me with an unreadable expression. One by one, everyone in the room called out their agreement to my—likely rash—plan. But I didn't see any other way. How could we sit back and wait for MacKenzie to come to us when there were so many other advantages the Darkside gave us? We had to use them. Until we beat MacKenzie, we couldn't find Dagda's cup or reach Drake, whom we needed to complete the process. And maybe that was exactly what MacKenzie wanted.

After the meeting, I went up to the nursery because I couldn't face the speculation downstairs. The others were passing word of the plan around, and I knew the fae were scared, but I needed confidence, if only to influence them with it. Polly was feeding Morgan when I arrived, and Scarlet and Eithne were playing on the floor next to Lily, who watched them with interested eyes. Setanta sat in his wheelchair, his hand gripping a wooden sword tightly. His mother would come, I realised, when she heard that her son was in a castle about to be sieged. I smiled at him, but he was too scared to smile back. If anyone got into the nursery, I would never forgive myself.

I scooped Lily up and held her close. She responded to me with affection. I sat on the floor next to the girls until Brendan stuck his head in and asked to speak with me. Polly was done with Morgan, who was fast asleep, finally content.

"Where's the other wet nurse's child?" she asked.

"In the Silver Court, I think."

"That must have been hard." Polly's child had been stillborn.

"Let's just say Morgan's lucky we found you for Lily." I handed Lily to her and went out into the hall to find Brendan.

He leaned against a wall and studied my face with grave eyes.

"You think I'm mad," I said.

"I think you're brave," he said. "We could all die here, and you haven't faltered once."

"There's no point."

"Can we speak in private?"

I nodded. "My room's through that door." I headed over, only pausing to tell Polly to call me if she needed me. Anya had gone to share a meal with Arlen, and Orlaith was always close by. The entire castle was bustling as everyone had been given a job to do. The cook had to make sure food was rationed, Rafe was in charge of pretty much everything else, and I was trying not to think about what would happen when MacKenzie's advance army arrived.

I led Brendan into my quarters and closed the door. "What's wrong?"

"I wanted to talk about what happened with MacKenzie. And Drake."

"Do you want to sit down or—"

"No."

Startled by the steel in his voice, I stood still as he paced in front of me.

"This man is sending an army to destroy you because you turned down his marriage proposal," he said. "That sounds beyond ridiculous, even for a fae, even for a possible follower of Chaos."

My face burned. "I... may have embarrassed him."

"How? What could you possibly have done to warrant this level of anger?"

I swallowed hard, staring at my feet. Telling him made me sound like a terrible person, but I didn't regret my actions. I lifted my head and met his curious gaze. "I made him think I would marry him."

"That doesn't sound like you. Why would you do something like that?"

Didn't he get it? "I made him think I would marry him if he took his army to your court and helped us get rid of Yvette."

"You told him?"

"I let him think it. If you were alive and safe—and he was the cause of it—I let him think he would be rewarded with a throne."

"Why did you do that?"

"Because I was scared we wouldn't have enough of our own," I said in a low voice. "I wasn't prepared to take the risk. I wanted the entire ordeal to be over with as quickly as possible. I didn't want him to kill Yvette. He did that himself, but I used him."

He shoved his hands deep into his pockets and continued pacing. "Sorcha sent for you."

"You saw the note, Brendan."

"I did. I just didn't understand why she would want you there."

"She was terrified for the baby. Donella had already targeted her, I had warned her she would die in childbirth, and she fell in love with her unborn child. She knew he would kill her, and she knew the banshees would kill him after her death. So she looked to me because she knew I was the one person in the realm who could be trusted with her child."

"And Drake let you?"

"He was drunk when I left," I said. "He didn't even go to her when she was dying. She was terrified, and I was the one with her instead of him. He was so weak, and she suffered for it."

He stopped walking and faced me. "Did he ask you to stay with him?"

I held his gaze. "Yes."

"And what did you say?"

"No, of course."

"But he could be a father to Scarlet. You could have what you so desperately seek."

I gaped at him. "Are you being serious?"

"Yes." He sounded stressed. "I thought that once you went to him... that would be it."

"I didn't go to him. I went to Sorcha. And I came home. To the Darkside, to my court, to _you_."

"We've spoken about how we wouldn't work." He closed the space between us. "We talked about my parents and their weakness."

"Right. You're saying we won't be together. Will it change anything? We've never been together. I still feel how I feel."

"How do you feel?" he whispered. "Tell me."

"I took an arrow in the chest for you. I was with you at the Provings, helping you. I could have gone home, but I stayed. With _you_. I went to the Fade for you. I brought your soul back from the afterlife. I took this bloody crown to stop anyone from cheating you out of it. I'm scared of having feelings for you. I won't pretend never to have cared about Drake, but for a long time now, it's only been you."

The look on his face pained my heart. He wrapped his arms around my back and held me close. "My parents—"

"So we won't get married. We'll have our own homes, and our own responsibilities, and if we survive this, then maybe we can consider a way to make time for one another." I raised my hand to touch his face. "But I won't ever go back to him. Too much time has passed, and I've grown up too much to sabotage myself like that again." I pulled him closer and kissed him. "You would never have let Sorcha die alone. You would never have ignored Scarlet. And you would never have hurt me."

"I'm not perfect. I've made terrible mistakes with you, too."

"You didn't marry someone else," I said with a laugh. "That's a tick in your box."

"What now?"

"On my way home from Drake's court, I sat in a silver carriage and imagined being here with you. I'm sick of... having regrets." I thought of Líle's attitude toward Zoe. "Maybe there's no way we can work out, but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy our time together. I don't need you to keep me, Brendan, but I'd like to spend some time with you."

"I should never have said that," he said with a groan. "It always comes back up in conversation. I didn't mean it, not really. You were so vulnerable, and I was so afraid of repeating my mistakes that I—"

"It doesn't even matter now," I said. "That was a different time, and we were different people. You were—"

He kissed me, and I wrapped my arms around him, desperate to warm my soul. I was still scared of giving myself away, but I had learned that never seeing Brendan again scared me more.

He ran his hands through my hair, and I curled my body against him, my hands clutching his collar to tug him closer. And there were no regrets. For the first time, I truly believed that I _deserved_ to be happy.

I pulled back to look at him, and to my relief, his gaze was completely clear of the daze I had so often seen in the eyes of the fae when they grew close to me.

"What is it?" he whispered.

"Just making sure I haven't overwhelmed you with my pesky feelings," I teased.

He grinned and kissed the tip of my nose. "I told you I'm used to you."

"I've been figuring out this emotional weapon thing I have going on. I can focus it now. Stupid Darksiders keep making me practice everything." I held up a calloused palm. "I'm going to be able to beat you in a duel at this rate."

"No doubt." He kissed the corner of my mouth. "You changed while I slept, Cara. I've never had you in my arms for this long without you running."

"Líle said something that made me think about being happy for the good times, no matter the outcome."

"I should thank Líle then." He sat by the fire and pulled me onto his lap, twisting a lock of my hair around his fingers. "It was hard to watch you leave that day on Yvette's land, but I'm glad you didn't come with us. Giants, Cara. Real giants almost killed us. I left people behind because of them."

"I know you wouldn't have done that if you'd had a choice. I'm sorry about your people. Maybe we can find a way to get them home someday."

He seemed to think carefully before he spoke. "You're the first person I've met whom I truly believe would care for me just as much if I hadn't been born into royalty."

The sincerity in his eyes made me uncomfortable. "Stop looking at me like that."

"I can't," he said. "You're everything I've wanted for the longest time."

"You're so cringey," I whispered, but I couldn't stop looking at him either. It felt almost as though it had been forbidden before, and now we were secretly indulging. "I wish I had been braver sooner."

"You were brave," he said. "You just weren't ready. Are you ready now, Cara?"

"I've been ready for a long time. I just have more responsibilities to worry about now."

"You were always a worrier. I would never hurt Scarlet, if that's what you fear. I would treat her as my own if you let me. And poor Lily."

"You would only spoil them." I brushed his hair away from his face. "You're a soft touch when it comes to the children."

He turned his head to kiss my blackened wrist, his stubble tickling my skin. "Do you remember the Provings?"

"How could I forget?" I shivered at his touch.

"You came to me and demanded to know why I didn't tell you how you could give me strength. And when you kissed me, it was different. I lost my heart right there and then. I wished we had somehow met first, that it had been me you were so protective of."

"You were a good kisser," I said, trying to keep the mood light. "Pretty odd for somebody trapped in the Fade without a body for a gazillion years."

"It was not a gazillion years," he said lazily.

"Might as well have been. I still remember that comment you made about women being almost as good as men."

He groaned. "You never forget a thing."

Someone pounded on the bedroom door. "My lady!" a voice cried. "Come at once! There's been a messenger from the Silver Court!"

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously?"

He dropped a sweet kiss on my lips. "Our work never ends."

# Chapter 11

We went downstairs to read the message from Drake. Rafe handed it to me at the bottom of the stairs, a group of fae gathering around him, impatiently waiting to hear what it said.

I unrolled the parchment and relaxed against Brendan in relief. "Rumble made it. He's okay. He got there in time to warn the Silver Court, and they were able to evacuate to the other castle before MacKenzie's forces came anywhere near them. They cut the bridge, and..." I skimmed the letter. "They're planning on flanking MacKenzie's army as soon as they deal with the small force that came for them." I looked up with a smile. "They couldn't tell us the plan in case the message got intercepted, but Rumble did it!"

Many of the fae cheered, and I looked up at Brendan with relief. Drake's army would help us.

"The message came quickly," Brendan said.

"But no news from the Miacha yet."

"Give them time. I hope to hear from my own court soon." He rested his hand on my lower back. "You need to eat. You'll collapse if you don't get some fuel into you."

"My stomach's too sick to eat."

"Try," he said firmly. "Eat with the children to ease your mind. We have a lot to do tomorrow."

"Or tonight. Maybe we should be heading out already."

"Rest first. Dubh won't be able to ride."

"I'll have to take a different horse. My poor dog and horse are both in pretty bad shape." I clapped my hands. "Okay, everyone back to work. We have a lot to do, but at least we know we have allies by our side."

The fae left willingly to attend to their assorted tasks.

I looked up at Brendan. "I need to check on things."

The corner of his mouth lifted. "Of course you do. Would you like some company?"

"Yes, please," I said, unable to hide my smile. I slipped my hand into his and led him on a tour of the castle.

I brought him to the kitchens, where the cook was desperately trying to figure out a way to ration our supplies. She waved at me, red-faced and sweating. "We're in the middle of a month, and with the little one's birthday, and the time of year, we should be a little low, but the harvests have been good, and our stores are full of _some_ things." She bit her lip. "Severely lacking in others though."

"Just do your best to make ends meet," I said. "I'm relying on you."

She mopped the sweat on her brow. "I'll stretch it. We'll be eating on stews thickened with flour rather than meat, but I'll stretch it."

I smiled. "I know you will."

We found Marron outside, sitting on the boundary wall and yelling orders at the fae below him. "I finally found a good use for the old thrones," he shouted when he saw me. "We'll give those bastards a fight, all right!"

I laughed at his enthusiasm. "Good luck, Marron."

His mud-coloured wings fluttered in response.

"Is he...?" Brendan began.

"One of Deorad's," I said. "Yep."

Rafe found me, his copper curls stuck to his face in his exertion. "All of the scouts and messengers have left. We should hear from the water fae soon and have some idea of what we're facing."

"Good. Make sure everyone in charge of operations has enough people under them. Oh, and organise it so that every child in the castle has a place to hide—and a way to escape if it all goes wrong."

"If it goes wrong—"

"Don't," I said, holding up my hand. "We're going to win. We have to."

Brendan and I walked on. "Maybe we should go over the river ourselves."

"That's what he'll expect," he said. "It's the quickest way to my court, which is the first place he'll think you'll want to go. He may not realise that I'm here."

"That's probably what's going to save the Green Court."

He took my hands and made me stop walking. "We're in this together. We always have been. We didn't know what we were fighting against at first, but we know now."

"It's just crazy," I said, shaking my head. "All of the terrible things that have happened were all set up before I ever set foot in the faery realm. It was all supposed to happen."

"Except you and I changed things with Drake's help. Sadler and his god never planned on our interference. They tried to make the most of it, but they weren't prepared. And we'll make sure that MacKenzie isn't prepared for whatever we throw at him."

We checked on Dubh, then Tris, and I made sure we spoke to all of our friends, everyone who had a large responsibility on their shoulders. Brendan and I connected with as many people as possible, and I saw their confidence grow. Brendan and I could do great things together, even if we never attempted to join our courts.

Finally, exhausted, I let him lead me to the nursery, where we ate a late meal with the children, who were still enamoured with the baby even though he had slept almost the entire time since he'd arrived at the castle. Conn stood from his chair when we entered the room.

"My lady," he said, taking a bow. "I wondered what you would have me do. Am I to join you on the runs you plan to make into the forest?"

I glanced at the children. "I'd love to have you with me, but I think Setanta needs you."

"No," Setanta called out. "We don't need Conn here. He's a great warrior. He should protect our queen."

I knelt next to the boy. "You and the other children need protection, too."

"You won't let them get us," he said, holding my gaze.

"I'll think about letting Conn go," I said at last.

I spent the next hour with the children, and my friends turned up, too. Vix gazed out the windows, her expression fierce with determination. Arlen and Anya stayed close together, taking care of Morgan. The newly married couple couldn't have children of their own, but Anya was the mothering type.

Bran was busy entertaining Scarlet and Eithne. Bekind curled up at Setanta's feet with the white cú sídhe, who was quietly ignoring Realtín's attempts to ride her like a pony. Grim, Líle, and Dymphna were having a whispered discussion about MacKenzie's army.

I sat close to Brendan on the rug in front of the fire, Lily resting in a baby bouncer in front of us. She watched the king with severe little eyes as he tried to make her laugh.

"Nothing works." Then he yawned, and she broke into giggles. "There we go," he said, sounding pleased.

"She's not foolish," I said. "She won't give away her smiles to just anyone."

"Not foolish at all, our Lily." He ran his finger down her nose until she reached for his hand. "How lucky she is that you found her that day in the woods."

"Imagine how differently things would have worked out if it hadn't been me who ended up gate-crashing the festival in the first place."

He wrapped his hand around mine. "No, thank you. You might no longer need us, but we still need you."

"No, you don't," I said softly. "But I'm glad you still want me around."

"I was an arrogant boy," he said with a laugh. "Thinking a human like you could be easily forgotten." His expression turned serious. "We're building the fae a good future."

He looked into the fire then, and I wondered if he were thinking about the possibility of Brighid returning to reward the fae for their growth. Because _I_ had been.

That evening, after everyone went to bed, Brendan made as though to leave, but I gripped his hand and nudged him toward my door. "Stay with me," I murmured. "I won't sleep otherwise."

He kissed the top of my head, and we walked into my room. Bekind was sitting on the bed, naked except for the sheet around her. She glared at Brendan. "If you break her heart, I will make your life a living hell," she said. "I'm immortal. You can never get rid of me. I'm like the mother-in-law from hell as far as you're concerned. If you're not prepared to—"

He held his finger against her lips. "Hush, kitten. I know what you're capable of. There's no need to be frightened. There's more chance of _my_ heart being damaged."

Her face fell. "She's _mine_. I've let the fae hurt her enough. I can't let any of you do it again."

My eyes watered at the pain in her voice. I wrapped my arms around her. "It's okay, Bekind. I forgive you for anything that came before. You don't have to worry about me anymore."

"I will as long as I live," she said scornfully, but her voice broke on the final word.

"We'll just have to find a way to make sure that isn't forever."

"I have a plan to end this war quickly. I'll sneak into MacKenzie's camp," she said. "I'll kill him in his sleep."

"You'll do no such thing. Donella has probably told him you're immortal. His people will torture you. You're forbidden from sneaking off and killing MacKenzie."

"His army is so very large."

"And you're so very important to me. You're my family. I'd only get myself killed trying to save you."

"How dare you try to manipulate me?" She smiled. "You get that sneaky streak from me."

"Go get some sleep," I said. "We'll win a few battles tomorrow just to cheer you up."

When she left, I yawned, exhausted.

"Come on," Brendan said. "Your cat relative scared me thoroughly. Can we sleep now?"

I nodded, thinking there was no way I could sleep with his body next to mine. But I fell asleep almost as soon as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to his chest.

I awoke feeling as though there was something I was supposed to do. And then I saw Brendan lying next to me, his eyes open, and I remembered everything.

I rolled over. "Hasn't anybody told you how creepy it is to watch someone sleep?"

"You make funny little faces in your sleep." He slipped his warm arm around my waist. "I was about to wake you."

"Can't somebody tell MacKenzie to come wage war some other day?"

"We won't see MacKenzie today."

But there were so many other things to deal with. The Miacha had sent a message saying the people I had sent to them were safe, save one who had run in fear and disappeared before reaching the house. The daoine sídhe had even picked off a couple of rangers in the forest. If they could be of any help to us, they would. The water fae had given a vague reply about doing what was necessary. I really hoped that meant they were still on our side.

The Green Court verified that they had not been attacked but would travel to the Silver Court to see if they needed assistance. Hopefully, Drake would send them to flank MacKenzie along with his troops.

Fiadh had sent a long, grovelling message about being honoured to be chosen to fight for her queen and her kingdom. She would already be on the move by the time the bird arrived with the message and hoped to please me with additions she gathered along the way. She was planning to travel to us by avoiding the Hollows, and I hoped she didn't come across the bulk of MacKenzie's army on the way, even if I never wanted to see her face again.

Some scouts had returned with reports. All of them had spotted MacKenzie's rangers shooting messenger birds out of the sky. The messages likely had been updates from the Silver Court or duplicates sent in case of just such sabotage occurring.

After having breakfast with the children, I got ready to leave. Only a few groups were heading out to do battle. We were confident that we could clear the path and stop the rangers from shooting down the messenger birds. We needed to send dispatches of our own. When I left the castle to speak to those riding out, I was surprised by the number of crows flying overhead. I had been feeding them in one of the towers, hoping their appearance would reassure the Darksiders, but far more than usual seemed to be hanging around.

"A good sign for us," Donncha said, strapping a sword to his horse.

"Let's hope," I said. "How many in each team, would you say?"

"Depends on their make up. Each should have a scout and a couple of sword fighters. An archer might come in handy."

"I have my own team. Brendan, Dymphna, and Líle are the sword fighters. Bekind can be my scout. Vix and Bran can both throw arrows. And Issy the cú sídhe can be my secret awesomesauce."

He faltered for a second as he tried to keep up. "That's... a lot of people for one team."

"And me," Conn announced from behind us. "I also will accompany the queen."

I studied him before nodding. "All right. We'll try it. We can always split in two, Donncha, and circle the band we're hunting."

"Are you sure you should be out there?"

"Why should these people fight for me if I'm not willing to?" I asked. "You know I've been training. I can fight."

* * *

He ran a hand over his bald head, looking stressed. "But MacKenzie's men have likely been fighting since childhood. They anticipate any move a person could make before they make it."

"Then I'll just have to fight dirty. I haven't just been training in sword fighting, you know."

He smiled. "I worry needlessly, I know. You'll be the safest woman in the realm today."

"I'm just sorry you can't come with us."

"I have a lot to do here. We need to strengthen our defences and plan some dirty fighting of our own."

I grinned at him. "Good luck."

"We don't need good luck." He gestured at the birds. "We have the warrior queen Badb on our side."

Brendan flinched at that.

"It's just something they say," I said, laughing it off as Donncha jumped on his horse and rode to the walls. "It doesn't mean much."

"It means something to these people," he said. He bent low to give me a deep, lingering kiss.

"Maybe we shouldn't be on the same team today," I said. "No saving me."

He tweaked my nose. "Shouldn't I be the one saying that?"

We prepared to leave first. My team headed out together, Bekind jumping into trees in her cat form and Issy sticking close to me. The horse I rode was no Dubh, but she would have to do.

Brendan and I led the group, with Bran and Vix flanking us. The others took up the rear.

"It's a pity the black pup is injured," Brendan said as we rode. "He looks impressive."

"Issy's impressive, too," I said. "Drake's gift saved my life."

He reached out and touched the bracelet he had given me. "But mine makes your wrist look elegant. Surely I win." He grinned when I rolled my eyes.

Bekind soon reappeared and shifted into her human form, reaching up to take the clothes I was holding for her. "There's a group close by," she whispered. "They have a dog with them, but it's as small as Issy. There are about ten of them, but six appear to be resting. Four are hyper-vigilant. It would be best to split up and take them from both sides. One side may alert the watchers, but they won't expect the second group in the scuffle."

"We'll do that," I said. "I'll lead, draw them out while the second team flanks them."

"I'm with you," Brendan said.

"They'll be suspicious at just the two of you," Conn said. "Let me follow you both."

"I can go and throw a dagger or two before they get their acts together," Vix said.

I nodded. "The rest of you go with Bekind and flank them. Issy will show us the way."

Bekind let Bran help her onto his horse. "Ride swift," she whispered to me.

The others raced off.

"Go, Issy," I commanded, and the dog followed the trail Bekind had left. Since Bekind had gotten over her fear of the dogs, she had been trying to train them for such an event.

The dog crept off, far more warily than the male would have. But he was harder to spot. She was snow white apart from a black patch around one eye.

Brendan and I followed at a distance, with Conn and Vix behind us. I had to admit I was curious to see his technique. His massive wings had to get in his way.

Soon, we found Issy crouched down low. When we listened carefully, we could hear the soft chatter of a couple of soldiers. We waited a few moments to ensure the second team was in place, then Vix climbed a tree to get a better view. No matter how hard she had tried, she couldn't teach me to aim her daggers. It both frustrated and pleased her because dagger throwing was second nature to her.

She signalled me to be ready then placed a dagger between her teeth. She wrapped one arm around a branch then pulled a second dagger out of her boot. She flung it, grabbed the dagger between her teeth, and flung that one, too. We heard a moan and a thud, and then we rushed into the camp to confront the soldiers there.

As Bekind had predicted, we caught most of them unaware. One was dead and another injured from Vix's daggers. Brendan held the sword of victory high as he pushed his horse into the camp and neatly beheaded a soldier reaching for his sword. I barely blocked a sword aimed at my leg because I was almost as dazzled as the enemy at Conn's appearance into the fray.

He flew off his horse, his dark, feathered wings slowing his descent to the ground. He looked like some kind of avenging angel as he elegantly swung his two-handed sword. The second group rushed into the camp, and the fight continued in earnest. We made quick work of the soldiers. My blood was rushing, and when I caught Brendan's gaze, I knew we were both feeling the same high. He rode over to me and wiped a smear of blood from my cheek.

"As if you need to be saved," he said with a snort.

I grinned. "I wasn't cut out to be a damsel in distress."

Bran held down the only soldier who had survived the fight. Even their hound was dead.

"How many?" Bran asked the soldier, who kept his mouth shut.

"Kill him," Brendan said. "He's never going to talk."

I looked away as Bran cut the soldier's throat. I didn't like war, I decided.

"It's a poor camp," Líle said.

I looked around and agreed. MacKenzie didn't take good care of his soldiers if their meagre supplies were representative of the whole army's.

I wiped my blade clean and put it back in its sheath. "This is just the first band," I said. "Look at those bows. They weren't even proper soldiers. They were only here to take down our birds."

"This is a win," Brendan said.

"A small one. We need to communicate with those on the other side of MacKenzie's army. This is just the beginning. Everyone, back on your horses. We have a lot of work to do today."

Other bands of soldiers waited out there, more rangers ready to cut us off from the rest of the world. We all mounted our horses and prepared to carry on with our mission. We would clear MacKenzie's forces out of my forest and reach the Hollows if it was the last thing I ever did.

# Chapter 12

We fell into a routine, quietly signalling to each other as we sought out the rangers in our forest. My blood ran hot, and I felt anything but human as I rode with a faery king by my side. Our lives were thrilling and dangerous and fantastically impossible. But when it was all over, what would be left?

Brendan and I kept watch by a stream while the others dealt with two tiny camps quite near each other. We were waiting for runners.

"Brendan," I whispered. "I need to ask you something."

He nodded without looking at me.

"I need you to promise me you'll make sure Scarlet and Lily, and even Morgan, are taken care of if something happens to me."

He did look at me then, this time with genuine surprise in his eyes. "But nothing's going to happen to you."

"The leader of a gigantic army kind of wants my blood. There's a chance that something will happen."

"I'm here." He held up the sword of victory. "I can't lose. It even saved me from drowning."

"Please. I really need to hear you say it."

He took my hand and made a solemn vow, his gaze never faltering from mine. "I swear that I will protect those children as if they were my own." His expression softened. "Whether you're alive or dead."

I reached over to kiss him.

Vix made a sound of disgust from nearby. "Is _nothing_ sacred anymore?"

I moved away from Brendan, hiding my smile. "Did you take care of the camps?"

"Yes," she said smartly. "Those were the last. Next up is the Hollows."

I could see the Hollow Hills from where I stood. A murder of crows flew over the peaks. "We should move quickly. I have a feeling that MacKenzie plans on holding a position at the Hollows to stop any of us from fleeing."

The three of us mounted and joined the others. Bekind was nowhere to be found.

"She's gone to scout ahead," Líle said when she noticed my worried expression.

When Bekind returned to confirm that she couldn't find any more bands of rangers, Vix released the bird from the cage strapped to her horse. It flew for home, a direct message that it was safe to communicate again. We stopped to have a brief meal, and then we continued on to the Hollows. We rested that night, all of us exhausted.

We didn't dare light a fire, but the night wasn't cold, and we had each other. Brendan lay his rug down next to mine.

"Too close?" he asked.

"We've often slept this close," I said, rolling over to face him. "Since when does that bother you?"

"I don't want to scare you off," he said frankly. "We all know how brave you are when faced with violence and yet how cowardly when faced with... affection."

I grinned at his teasing. "Don't start thinking I'll let you get away with anything just because I kissed you."

He ran his finger across my lips. "You couldn't have had better timing? Like, for example, when there wasn't a war interrupting our every moment alone?"

"It's that brave coward thing. The war is making me brave enough to forget how to be a coward."

"And when the war is over?" he asked gently.

I rolled onto my back and gazed up at the lilac moon. "I've no idea. It would be easier if I wasn't a queen, I suppose."

"You won't always be a queen," he said, poking my side. "Scarlet will reign someday."

I looked at him. "She's a baby. Can you really wait until she's ready to rule?"

I meant it as a joke, but he answered "yes" so seriously that I reached out to cup his face. " _Brendan_."

"There's plenty of time to speak of such things. We need to rest. The days, the weeks, the months, maybe even the years ahead will be tough, tougher than either of us expect. As long as we both know, should disaster strike, that we didn't leave things unsaid, then I'm content."

I inched closer to him and wrapped my arm around his broad chest. We lay together, and I slept well, but my dreams were as persistent as ever. The words kept changing until they grew meaningless, and when I woke up stressed, I had an awful feeling that I was forgetting something.

We left our camp before dawn and continued on to the Hollows in the dark.

It was still dark when our quiet procession reached the Hollows. In the path between the hills, bodies of soldiers lay dead and unmoving. Beyond, we could plainly see a large camp blocking the way of anyone who tried to escape the Darkside.

"More than I thought," Dymphna said. "But who battled here? Who killed the soldiers?"

"Those who live in the hills," I said. As I watched, quick movements drew my attention. "Thank you," I called out. "But you should hide. There are too many of them, and they'll try to pass again."

There was no reply, but I hadn't expected one.

Bran called out from the upper branches of a tree. "MacKenzie's army beyond the Hollows is massive, but there is a large camp to the west of here."

"MacKenzie's?" Brendan asked.

"They wear black," Bran replied.

"It could be a trap," Dymphna said.

"Bekind can investigate," I said. "Bran, do you mind hanging out in the tree for a while?"

"They seemed to be settled for the night," he said. "But dawn will soon break. It'll take Bekind a couple of hours to get there." He made a face at me. "And, yes, I'll hang out in the tree."

"I'll swap with you when you need a break," Vix said. "There's no need for you to be our only lookout."

By Bran's expression, he wasn't planning on showing any signs of weariness.

"Well," Vix said. "While he's being a big brave boy, I think I'll climb the hills and see if I can cause any mayhem in MacKenzie's camp."

"Don't you dare do anything alone," I said fiercely.

"I won't. _Mother_."

Before I could stop her, she was climbing one of the steep hills as though she did it every day.

"I'll follow her," Conn said. "She may get herself into trouble she cannot back out of."

"You mean like every other day?" I said. "Go on. Try to rein her back in."

The rest of us settled the horses and our equipment in a dense woods. We roamed the area, watching for trouble, chewing on dried meat, and waiting for Bekind to return.

Vix and Conn arrived first, running across the hills as if their lives depended on it. Vix's face gleamed with excitement and mischief, and I sighed.

The camp at the other side of the hills was in an uproar. A number of soldiers ran toward the path, but they flinched as they looked upward. Apparently, Vix had caused trouble from above.

"We should have brought means to attack," Vix said when she jumped down the last foot of the hill.

"For once, I agree with her," Conn said. "They are in a beautiful position, but they're weak to an attack from higher ground."

"We'll let the troops who come here know." I looked wistfully toward the camp. It would have been nice to make a dent in MacKenzie's armies.

Soon after, Bran called out a warning. "Bekind's coming, but she's not alone!"

Brendan clutched the sword of victory and strode out to meet Bekind and her companion. I hurried to catch up, and the others followed, moving out to circle us at a distance.

Bekind was walking in her human form, a black cloak wrapped around her. Her companion was a young male I didn't recognise. His wings were small and turquoise. Bekind whispered something to him, and he immediately fell to his knees.

"My queen, we have heard from the lady Fiadh of the devil who dares to attack the Darkside. She sent us word before she left to march with her own armies. We are to meet her here."

"Fiadh sent you?" I asked.

"We've all sworn loyalty to you," he said. "We are your servants, and there's no Darksider who will stand by and let an intruder hunt our queen. Our troops are here to bend to your will."

"And Fiadh's bringing more?" Brendan asked.

"They have a good number of soldiers," Bekind said.

"Any archers?" I asked.

"Of course," the faery said.

"Then I do have a mission for you. You and Fiadh must guard the Hollows. So far, the creatures in the hills have stopped any push by MacKenzie's troops, but I'm told they're ripe for an aerial attack. Your archers will need to climb the hills under cover of darkness, but you could use fire and anything else at your disposal to disrupt MacKenzie's army. He has a large force out there. Can you help us diminish it?"

"We will be glad to. And the lady Fiadh?"

"Tell her to stay here," I said coldly. "I don't want to see her, but I'll be happy for her soldiers to help you."

Brendan moved closer to me. "It's an important task. Are you sure you can trust these people?"

"They're Darksiders," I said. "They don't just fight for me. They fight for their land. And we all know that the sooner this war ends, the sooner we can continue our search for the final legendary treasure. I'll take all the help I can get."

"Surely MacKenzie is trying to stop us from finding it," Brendan said.

The strange Darksider bowed even lower. I had originally thought him foolish, but when he looked up at me, his fierce gaze was terrifying. "We'll shed the blood of every enemy who tries to get in our way. No army will pass these hills."

"Good," I said. "But watch out for Darksiders and even fae from the Green and Silver Courts seeking refuge. Some may pass this way."

He stood up straight. "You can depend on us. The way we've come from is clear and free of enemies."

"Then we can move on with our plans. We've gotten rid of the rangers who were shooting down birds, so your people can send messages to the castle if you need assistance. Be wary of MacKenzie's birds, too. And good luck."

I gathered my friends, and we headed back to the castle, this time passing the bridge to the mountain path. A team of Donncha's soldiers were taking down the bridge and building trenches at the passable points along the river. I warned them about the troops at the Hollows, and they swore to watch for any signs of battle and send word to the castle of the outcome.

"Are you being reinforced?" I asked, concerned by their small numbers.

"More are following," Oisín told me. "But they're bringing supplies, so their journey is slower. The water fae have helped us as best they can." He looked at me seriously. "I think your plans are sound. We have a good chance. Eventually, some section of MacKenzie's army will find a way through, but they won't be able to pass in great force. There's just nowhere broad enough."

"Be careful out here. Don't be afraid to avoid loss. I want you all alive, and if that means you're forced to retreat behind castle walls, then so be it."

His mouth curved up in a smile. "I don't think I could persuade any one of these soldiers to retreat. They're yours for good. We're all in this together."

We stayed to speak with the soldiers for a time, shared a few words with the water fae, who appeared to be pissed off by all of the commotion, and then headed back to the castle. When we came upon the troops carrying supplies, we accompanied them for a time to reassure them and boost their confidence.

But even I could clearly see MacKenzie's forces approaching from across the water. They would bully their way across, and they would come for us. My run-down little castle wouldn't stand a chance if they made it that far. But if the Green and Silver Court armies could at least distract some of MacKenzie's army, and if we could limit their advance by blocking the Hills and the best parts of the Garbh's banks, then the odds of our survival improved.

# Chapter 13

I checked on the nursery for the seventeenth time in an hour.

"Calm yourself," Vix said lazily from a chair by the fire. "His army is hardly going to storm the castle while our backs are turned. He's throwing everything at us. We'll see him coming."

And we were watching. MacKenzie's troops had been moving closer all morning, preparing for battle.

"This is the last time." I looked out the window at the fae moving supplies from the courtyard to the troops stationed outside. "After this, I'm getting ready to leave."

She raised a brow. "So soon?"

"I need to lead. I have to be at the forefront. I'll face MacKenzie, and I'll show everyone I'm not afraid to. And if I can, I'll stop this war of his before we bear the brunt of it. He has to see that this is ridiculous. The realm is dying. What's he going to accomplish?"

She folded her arms across her chest. "He's going to take everything he can from us. If you and those kings die, then MacKenzie will control the entire realm, whether on behalf of his god or not. If not, he'll only need to find the final treasure and use it himself to end the blight. He won't need to depend on a love-sick idiot or a grieving madman to help him. He can do it all alone."

"And if he's working on behalf of his god?"

She sighed. "Then he wants this place to die and his god to wake up for good. Either way, you suffer. Are you sure you want to face him? His forces haven't surrounded the castle yet. There's a way out. You'll have to take the children close to the Hauntings, but—"

"That could destroy them," I said. "We can't just stay with the Watcher and wait for the blight to get us either. No, it's too late to run. If we're caught..." I shivered at the idea of Donella or MacKenzie getting their hands on the innocent children in the nursery.

I watched them play, Setanta the only one who really understood what was at stake. He knew the blight could kill him, knew that he was still alive only because Scarlet's passive magic seemed to cleanse the blight around her. The rumours about her had been flying around the court, but nobody had dared to mention offering her as a sacrifice to end the blight. There had to be another way, and I would find it, if we survived MacKenzie.

Eithne giggled as Scarlet made a toy car drive across the room without touching it. Dymphna's daughter had been kidnapped before, to be raised to marry Drake's crazy father, who was obsessed with the colour of her hair. I shivered at the thought of Scarlet being raised for a similar purpose. And Lily had no value to anyone but me. Who would protect her if the rest of us were dead? And the baby... Morgan didn't stand a chance. Wiping out the nursery would weaken all three courts, even if Drake, Brendan, and I survived. We had to protect the children at all costs, and as my soldiers had yet to take back the closest portals that were heavily guarded by MacKenzie's men, it would take a miracle to leave now.

A lump formed in my throat. "I should go."

I said goodbye to the children and went downstairs, followed by Vix. "Will Orlaith be enough?" I asked.

"She won't be alone. There will always be others guarding the castle and those within. You've made sure of that. Stop doubting your plans."

"I just... I have a bad feeling. What do I know about war, Vix? MacKenzie is experienced. He has a well-trained army that's way larger than mine. It might be easier to defend, but what if I've missed something? What if I haven't thought of everything? What if—"

"You're not alone," she said, less harshly than usual. "We all want to survive. We're not going to let you mess this up by missing anything obvious. If we fail, it won't be for lack of trying. And if we fall, we fall fighting for ourselves. Don't you understand? We're finally proud of our home. We have this place that was like a prison. We hid, and we snuck around, and we were hated by the rest of the realm. Now they're fighting by our sides as though we're worth something."

"You were always worth something, Vix."

She bent her head for a moment, and when she finally looked at me, her eyes were glassy. "Not until you came here."

On a whim, I hugged her, and she hugged back for about three seconds before breaking away and making a sound of disgust. "Seriously! Humans!"

She stormed off, leaving me smiling. Whether she liked it or not, Vix was a softy deep down.

I went outside to find Donncha for an update. As the general of the Darkside's relatively tiny army, he was constantly receiving reports from various bands around the Darkside. Many of our soldiers were travelling to join us and might not even turn up in time. I had never realised just how dull waiting for battle could be. It took an age for any sort of action to happen, and when it did, it was generally far away from us, more of a skirmish on the outskirts of our territory. Waiting around for something to happen was slowly killing me. We could have been searching for Dagda's cup, but instead we were waiting for a bully to try to destroy us.

Donncha looked worried when I found him. He and Brendan were in the middle of a heated discussion.

"What's going on?" I asked. "What's happened now?"

"The teams who left for the portals haven't sent back any communications," Donncha said. "We don't know if they tried or were ambushed."

"They could be in trouble," I said. "We can send a larger group to investigate."

"I don't think we can afford to risk any more men on the portals."

"MacKenzie's troops have been separating and marching," Brendan said. "And they're about to attack us at every angle."

"We can't fully defend every point of attack." Donncha cast a wry glance at Brendan. "No matter how many times we discuss it."

"Then get me in front of MacKenzie," I said. "Let me talk to him, try to agree to a truce. There has to be a way to persuade him. If we can get him to back off long enough to deal with the blight, then—"

"And if he refuses to talk?" Brendan asked. "What then?"

"Then we'll have to fight," I snapped. "But at the very least, I can try to save the soldiers who'll get in the way. We're outnumbered and outmatched on every level. We could be defeated before reinforcements even arrive. And if he gets near those children—"

"We won't allow that to happen," Donncha said firmly. "We'll protect the castle with—"

"You said yourself we can't spare enough soldiers. Worst case scenario is MacKenzie's forces getting past us and into the castle. It isn't just the heirs I'm worried about. There are families living in my court, families who came to us for protection. They're still arriving, and we have their children trapped in a castle we might lose at any time. I have no choice. I have to face MacKenzie. There has to be something he wants."

"And if it's power?" Brendan demanded. "A crown or two? To free a god? What then?"

"Then we deal with him some other way," I said fiercely. "And his army will fall apart around him."

"He may hesitate if she tries to parlay," Donncha said. "But he won't trust us."

"He'll know how desperate I am," I said. "He thinks me being human is a failing, and he'll try to take advantage of that."

"We could use his daughter as leverage," Donncha said with a frown.

"I already told you that won't work," Brendan said. "MacKenzie knows Cara isn't that cruel."

"Do you know where MacKenzie is?" I asked Donncha, ignoring his big idea. It wouldn't work because MacKenzie didn't give a crap about his own daughter, not when it came to gaining power. Not when he thought the leanan sídhe might give him a son instead.

"We haven't pinned him down yet," Donncha admitted. "There are rumours of sightings in various camps, which is an impossibility. He can't be everywhere at once."

I frowned. Bekind had given me a similar answer when I'd asked her how our spies were getting on in our enemy's camps. They were taking a massive risk, and so far, it had been for nothing. Few of MacKenzie's soldiers knew what move they were to make next. Their orders came late and urgently, and even fewer of them knew whence the messages came. It was entirely frustrating.

"Where's Bekind?" I asked.

Donncha rubbed his bald head, looking uncomfortable. "She's gone out to find the missing patrols."

" _Alone_?"

"She's just checking some of the trails. If she finds trouble, she'll turn back." Donncha shrugged. "She refused to listen to my advice. Said she couldn't rest easy today."

"Typical." I just hoped she remembered her promise not to go after MacKenzie herself.

MacKenzie's armies moved swiftly before dawn, attacking our points of defence with everything they had. By the time Donncha pinpointed the main force heading for the castle—the one most likely to involve MacKenzie, who liked to lead his men—the sun was already high in the sky. My general persuaded me to hold off on leaving the castle until we were absolutely sure of MacKenzie's presence.

I rode out on an unfamiliar horse with Issy the following morning. We had received word of numerous sightings of MacKenzie on his dappled grey horse, leading the charge, and I hadn't been able to wait any longer. Too many Darksiders had already died in battle. I had plenty of protection around me, but still, I felt uneasy. I wasn't sure how to approach MacKenzie, how I could manipulate him into ending a war he would almost certainly win.

The main force had broken past our defences far too easily at one section of the river, but they camped on Darkside land instead of marching to attack the castle. I hoped that meant MacKenzie was open to negotiation. If not, his actions had given my army a chance to prepare.

I rode ahead with a small team of soldiers. I was about to talk MacKenzie down or I was about to be bait, but either way, my people were prepared. Brendan and the others were arranged in small teams, ready to flank MacKenzie if it all went wrong. Vix and Bran and others like them were positioned in the trees, hoping to take a shot at MacKenzie from afar if they could.

A messenger headed toward MacKenzie's camp, and we waited impatiently for him to return. He had volunteered, but my heart raced as he neared the camp, wondering if they would kill him. But he appeared to be safe, and a small party soon approached us as requested.

My injured arm was bothering me. I hoped I wouldn't be forced to fight. Or flee. Dubh was back in the stables, supposedly resting. But I had heard his neighs of protest as we left without him. I half expected him to kick down the stable door and chase after us with Tris, the injured hound.

I squinted in the sunlight as we rode to meet the others halfway. They stopped before they reached us. I recognised MacKenzie's dappled grey mare, his armour, but to my eyes, it didn't fit.

"Wait," I said, confused. "Something's off."

"Think it's an ambush?" Rumble asked.

"I don't know." I urged my horse forward a couple of steps. MacKenzie looked injured. He was holding his sword in the wrong hand. And it wasn't his family sword. It was shorter and thinner and—

"That's not MacKenzie!" I cried out.

The soldier behind my messenger reached around and slit his throat. A brief silence followed, then suddenly, chaos ruled. Shouts and cries and commands filled the air as more soldiers rode into view. Our own troops flooded the area from the east, following yet another of MacKenzie's bands. Their skirmish apparently had been routed to our location, causing even more confusion.

Fake MacKenzie kept back from the battle, and I got separated from Rumble as the fight began.

I gripped the reins in a panic. If that wasn't MacKenzie, then where was he? My stomach dropped as I recalled the missing soldiers Donncha had mentioned. We had been led away from the castle for a reason, and I doubted MacKenzie had ever been with the bulk of his army.

I turned the horse around and rode back to the castle, struggling to make my way past my own troops.

"What's going on?" Vix shouted from where she was hanging upside down in a tree.

"Wasn't MacKenzie!"

I rode on, my thundering heart drowning out her answering swears. Sweat trickled down my back in my panic. In the distance, near the gates, I saw bodies, and I knew. MacKenzie had gotten into the castle. He was already there. I was too late.

I dug in my heels, and the horse kept galloping. The bodies weren't those of my soldiers alone, but I recognised some who had been left in charge of protecting the castle. I jumped off the horse inside the walls, managing to catch the last of a battle between one of my soldiers and MacKenzie, who wore no armour. He turned to laugh at me as my soldier died a painful death.

MacKenzie wiped the sweat from his brow. "There she is. And injured to boot."

"Get away from my home," I snarled, my heart beating so fast I felt faint.

He whirled his sword in the air. It glinted as he aimed the point at my heart. "In case you hadn't noticed, I really don't like being told what to do."

# Chapter 14

MacKenzie advanced on me, his sword longer than my leg.

"You hid, you coward," I said. "You snuck through the portal from the human realm and you hid."

"Misdirection," he said lightly. "I don't need to defeat an army when I can murder a couple of children in their beds. I thank you for your convenient appearance, by the way. I appreciate the opportunity to kill two birds with one stone."

"Is this for Chaos?"

He hefted his sword in his hands. "I'm more of a leader than a follower."

I stepped back to put space between us, but I unsheathed my own weapon. I wouldn't go down without a fight, no matter how afraid I was of the man.

"A duel," he proposed. "He who wins, wins all."

"You're another fool who underestimates a queen," I taunted. "I don't lose."

"You lost the moment you tried to trick me." With a growl, he rushed at me, his sword raised. I waited as long as I could stand to before ducking under his strike. I felt the wind of the blade and almost fell as my fear momentarily overtook me.

Ducking away from his second attack, I ran until I was before the castle doors. He came at me, but I couldn't let him pass. No matter what, I couldn't let him pass.

He struck again. I managed to block him, but his blade was far heavier than mine, and I struggled to hold him off. He wasn't even trying, and the realisation hit me that I could never beat him in combat, no matter how much I had learned.

The sound of horse hooves distracted him long enough for me to break away and try to sink my blade into his side. He deflected the strike without even looking, lashing out to knock me back against the wall.

But Brendan came racing through the gates on his golden horse. He leapt off the animal mid-gallop and landed on his feet like a cat, his expression a mixture of determined focus and uncontained rage. I thought I had seen him angry before, but _this_ vibrated from him like something tangible.

MacKenzie laughed. "Look at your face," he said to me. "You actually believe he'll rescue you."

I was faster than him and moved out of the way as he swung at me. The tip of his sword cut my cheek, but I barely felt the pain. With two of us, the children stood a chance.

Brendan unsheathed the sword of victory. "Coward," he spat. "Fighting an injured human who hasn't been trained since infancy in swordplay. Come try me, follower of Chaos."

MacKenzie sneered, moving to keep both of us in his sights. "I'm more than Chaos could ever be. I know how to take his power. You haven't even figured out that much. This realm is wasted on you fools."

Brendan moved as though hunting him, his body tense and on high alert. I inched closer to him, waiting for my chance to help.

MacKenzie looked at me, no trace of worry in his expression. "I'll battle any of you, but I've accomplished what I set out to achieve today. My assassin is already in the nursery, and I'll soon have your legendary treasures in my possession."

Brendan didn't even look at me. "Cara, go. I'll take care of him."

I didn't hesitate. I turned and raced into the castle, hearing the clash of metal against metal behind me.

Inside the main hall, the corridors were empty but for a handful of bodies, and the echoes of multiple battles scattered around the castle hung in the air. Fear crept through my body as I ran. I had wasted too much time on MacKenzie. I heard somebody bellow in pain from somewhere above, and my legs went numb as I burst through a set of doors and toward a staircase.

Donella turned and stared at me from halfway up the stairs, her eyes full of surprise and apprehension. She quickly recovered and plastered her usual sneer across her lips.

"Don't you regret it now?" she asked. "Shunning me when you could have had it all? _I_ landed on my feet. I married a man who'll soon be a god."

"Oh, you mean the man Brendan's about to kill?"

She hissed through her teeth. "Have you wrapped him around your finger so tightly? I'm not surprised. After all, I managed to persuade him that taking Sadler's wife was his idea. He wanted to help his poor, misguided friend, but he should have known that any man who slights me _will_ be punished."

"Get the hell out of my way before I cut you down."

A mocking smile curved her lips. "You're scared. I'm not surprised. You should really be more careful with your precious things. You're too late, I'm afraid."

I raised my sword, willing my arms to stop shaking. "Not yet."

She pulled back her elbows and prepared to send some kind of magical attack at me.

I didn't know what she could do, but I held my ground, gathering my emotions around me as I prepared to attack with my own brand of magic. I had enough fear and anger roiling around inside me to do some damage.

But a black cat bounded through the window, startling both of us. Bekind transformed into her human form and leapt onto Donella's back, grabbing one of the large pins holding up her hair.

"Making me immortal was just one more horrific mistake," Bekind hissed as she pierced the side of Donella's throat with the pin.

Donella gurgled, clutching her neck as Bekind released her and violently stabbed once more. "That's for Cormac."

My dying ancestor's eyes widened in shock as she fell down the stairs, her blood staining the stone.

"I found the soldiers," Bekind panted. "Came back as fast as I could when I realised MacKenzie was already here."

"We need to get to the nursery!"

Bekind, her golden hair damp with crimson blood, turned on her heel and ran, but I outpaced her, faster on two legs.

I sprinted up the stairs in record time, raced down the corridor, and jumped over the body of one of the children's bodyguards. Distraught, I burst through the doors to the nursery.

I couldn't see most of the children. Polly must have hidden them, but she was still struggling to drag Setanta to safety. His wheelchair was broken and lying on its side. An enemy lay dead next to it, a wooden sword through his throat. Setanta's trembling hands were covered in blood, and he panted hard, his eyes fixed on the body.

On the other side of the room, Orlaith was valiantly fighting off two more attackers, but her strikes were weakening, and she limped with a bad injury to her leg.

With a cry of rage, I rushed at one of the soldiers, who tumbled out of my way so quickly that all I managed to do was whack him in the nose with the hilt of my sword. He fell back and accidentally kicked the sword out of my hands. While I reached for it, he grabbed me and held me to his chest on the ground. I elbowed him a couple of times, and Bekind turned back into a cat to scratch his face. I kicked out at Orlaith's other attacker, who got too close to us, and rolled away from my opponent. He had let me go to fling Bekind away from him, his face covered in bleeding scratches.

The soldier tripped over my foot and stumbled, giving Orlaith the opportunity to end her life. My attacker gripped my hair and pulled me back toward him. I kicked and scrambled to my knees, but Orlaith shouted at me to duck. I dropped in time to see Bekind claw the man as he swung at me. He missed me completely.

That sword was meant for my daughter, I remembered, for all of the children, and red clouded my vision as I let my anger absorb me completely. I couldn't think, only act.

Both the soldier and Orlaith took a couple of steps back as if my anger had hit them a physical blow. Bekind was still hanging on to him, and I grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and flung her at Orlaith, who freaked out and fumbled the catch. I cut the man's wrist with my dagger as he shakily lifted his sword, and he dropped his weapon.

The taint in my body burned my veins as I succumbed to the darkness inside me, the part of me that revelled in Chaos, the part of me that came from Chaos in the first place. It gave me strength—and madness—but at that moment, I didn't care.

I lashed out with my dagger, cutting his neck—not too deeply—then kicked him with such force that he fell against the window. The glass pane cracked, and the man clutched at air in terror as he fell backward. He landed with a thump on the stone pavings outside.

Appeased by a sense of vengeance, I looked out the window, satisfied by his lifeless body. But then I caught sight of Brendan and MacKenzie still locked in battle, and the darkness seeped away in a rush that made me grip the window ledge to steady myself.

Brendan was exhausted from the recent battles—had obviously overstated his recovery from the curse—and was struggling against MacKenzie, who, having hid from his army and therefore the majority of the battles, still appeared fresh and light on his feet.

"Where are the children?" Bekind was shouting at Polly.

I turned to see the young woman point toward the bedroom, tears running down her cheeks.

I rushed over to my bedroom door and knocked on it loudly. "Are the children all right?" I called out.

Grey Eyes unlocked the door. "They're well. They're all unharmed."

I breathed a deep sigh of relief. Morgan was asleep, and my girls were crying, but they were safe. Eithne was standing right by the door with a wooden sword in her hands.

"Look at you," I said. "Protecting them like your mother would. I'm proud of you."

Eithne's lower lip wobbled, and she allowed her tears to fall.

Orlaith helped Polly lift Setanta. I gripped his shaking hand.

"Eithne tripped him," he said. "And he fell on me, and I..."

"Thank you," I whispered, quickly dropping a kiss on his cheek. "All of you, lock yourselves in the bedroom. I'll be back."

"Where are you going?" Bekind asked frantically.

"To Brendan."

I fled before I could change my mind. I met Bran and Vix on the stairs, pelting upward. Vix's face threatened to crumple when she caught sight of me. I realised I was covered in blood.

"They're okay," I said without pausing in my flight. "Check on the other families. I have to go!"

"Our armies are beating back MacKenzie's," Bran called out after me.

But in that moment, I didn't care.

I raced back down the stairs, my heart beating out of my chest. The children were safe, but Brendan was not, and I couldn't handle that either.

I rushed outside, but Brendan and MacKenzie weren't in the main courtyard. I panicked until I remembered the nursery window looked out over the gardens and lake. I raced around, past the stables where Dubh was kicking in an attempt to free himself, until I found MacKenzie standing over Brendan, who lay in the grass, bleeding from a cut to his thigh.

Unthinkingly, I ran straight for MacKenzie and drove my dagger into his spine. He gasped in alarm and turned, trying to run me through with his sword. Brendan lifted the sword of victory and cut MacKenzie's fingers away, sending the sword flying. MacKenzie stood there for a moment as if frozen.

"There is no honour in this," he spluttered.

"I'd rather have _him_ than honour," I said fiercely. I yanked my dagger free and tackled MacKenzie to the ground, managing to sink the knife into his heart in the struggle.

I didn't even realise the man was dead until Brendan lifted me away and sat with me on the ground a few feet away.

"It was just a feint." He held me close. "I had him, Cara."

"I don't care." I wrapped my arms around him. "I was terrified."

He brushed my fringe away from my face and kissed me. "Everyone is all right? I heard glass breaking and someone falling. Was it one of ours?"

I shook my head. "The children are fine. Bekind killed Donella on the stairs, but she was just a distraction. There were soldiers in the nursery. They're all dead now. Bran and Vix arrived, so they'll help clear out the castle of any other intruders. And now I have to go back out."

"You're not serious," Brendan said.

"I have to grab Leonora then go lead my army to victory. Now that I know you and the girls are safe." I planted a brief kiss on his lips. "This is my battle, and I'm going to finish it. We're not going to be anybody's pushover. I have to do this. Don't you see?"

"I understand," he said, "but I don't like it."

"Will you stay with them? So I know they're safe?"

He hesitated for a second before nodding. "I'll protect them."

By the time I managed to drag Leonora away from an injured Aiken, Dubh had already freed himself and was waiting outside with Tris. It was time for MacKenzie's daughter to reclaim her rightful heritage.

# Chapter 15

Leonora and I joined the army, spreading the word about MacKenzie and Donella's deaths as we moved. She had seen her father's body before we left, but her only reaction had been a soft _oh_ that was full of relief rather than sadness.

The news of his death had a positive effect on morale, and Leonora's presence changed the tide as many of the leaderless soldiers turned to her for command instead. We spent the afternoon driving those still loyal to MacKenzie back from the river. Disheartened, many of them began to separate in an attempt to flee. But most of them ran right into our reinforcements, including the armies of the Green and Silver Courts.

When my people shouted their victory cries, I was there in the middle, rejoicing with them. I belonged. I was part of them, part of everything that made us who we were, and I was finally in a place I was meant to be. I was _more_. And the people I cared about most were safe.

The only thing that could ruin my happiness was the blight.

The remainder of the enemy army was in pieces, scattering across the desert—where they would likely die without supplies—and into the forest—where they would be rooted out like rats if they refused to give Leonora their loyalty. The major battles were done.

"Donncha!" I called out to my general. "I'm heading back to the castle. Find those close by, but don't waste time and energy chasing the others. We can take care of them later. But watch out for Rumble."

"I'll send someone to meet with the Silver army," he said.

I returned to the castle with the cú sídhe and vowed never to take them with me again. They would have protected the girls far better than any soldier. I had come too close to losing everything through sheer stupidity. MacKenzie and Donella had almost outplayed us.

Back at the castle, soldiers were still trampling up and down the stairs, making sure no other enemies remained. The injured were in the Great Hall, where Grey Eyes and Anya were doing their best to help. I saw Orlaith run across the room and stopped her. "Where are the children?"

"In the meeting room. We thought it would be safer until the castle has been cleared."

I nodded and headed straight there. Brendan was sitting on a chair, his injured leg bandaged. Bran and Vix stood on either side of the door, watching over the children, who were being taken care of by Bekind and Polly.

"No more drama here then." I took a seat next to Brendan. I would have killed for a shower.

"How is it out there?" Brendan asked.

"The army's broken and scattered. Your people and Drake's caught them unawares, and when they heard of MacKenzie's death, they just fell apart. About half turned to Leonora. We'll have trouble from the others for a while, I think, but the main battle's over. We can move on to more important things. Like finding Dagda's cup."

"Not even a day to rest?" Brendan sounded exhausted. "Dafina, the elder we brought back from over the sea, mentioned something about the treasures on the island. I believe she told us that Manannán was responsible for hiding the cup."

"Manannán? Isn't he another god?"

"Is he even real?" Vix asked.

"On the boat, I dreamt of him. He told me I was allowed to pass. On that same night, Yvette had a nightmare. Perhaps he told her differently, and that was why we were attacked." Brendan shrugged. "He's said to be the god of the sea. If she's right, and she might not be, then the cup could be hidden underwater."

"But where?" I asked. "Is it even in this realm?"

"I think it must be," he said. "Are you certain it's not in the Darkside? Perhaps that's truly why MacKenzie invaded."

"Maybe the water fae will know," I said. "Or the Watcher. Or the hedge witch. Or the guardian witch of the blackthorns. Maybe the mention of Manannán will help Levin in his research, piece together shreds of stories or something."

"Everyone with knowledge is out looking for information," Bran said. "It's only a matter of time before one of them finds something that can help us."

"I don't want to wait," I said. "I want to feel as though I'm doing something." And I wanted to see the guardian witch again in case she had another prophesy for me. "If we keep waiting around for someone else to do the work, some other disaster will befall us in the meantime. Something doesn't want us to find the cup, and that's exactly why we have to."

I looked at the children in the corner. Lily and Setanta were both badly afflicted, and even Morgan was wan on the Darkside. I needed to end the blight and protect their futures.

Mayhem filled the castle for the next couple of days. Bodies were removed, blood cleaned, enemies tracked down, and dozens of messages sent and received. Rafe was happy to give me all of the news as he heard it.

Blue Eyes finally got a message through letting us know they were well, and as soon as everything died down, I planned on sending an escort to fetch to my home the Silver Court volunteers who had intended to accompany Morgan.

The battle at the Hollows would be legendary, if the reports were true. Fiadh's gathered troops had unleashed hell on the enemy soldiers, raining fire down on them and destroying their camp. Some had tried to cross the Hollows only to be cut down by the creatures within. The rest had retreated, likely intending to join the rest of the army.

Fiadh sent small groups after them to pick them off in the forest. They proceeded to do so until the enemy ran right into Drake and Rumble. The Silver army had taken care of business then turned to the west of MacKenzie's main camp. Having coordinated with the Green Court on the way, they launched a midnight attack on the largest camp they came across and effectively won that battle. When the army moved against us, they followed and waited for an opportunity. The water fae had destroyed bridges, scared off warriors, and even drowned some of our enemies. Stories soon spread of small tribespeople lying in wait in the forests, setting traps to trick the soldiers. Even the tunnelers were said to have destroyed a camp in the desert—although that likely wasn't on our behalf.

Finally, we heard that the Green army were camped out, waiting for their king to join them. And Drake was on his way to visit my court with Rumble, having sent the bulk of his army after the retreating soldiers.

I spent the next day dreading his appearance. I was watching an obviously traumatised Setanta stare off into the distance in the new nursery when Brendan found me.

"You look worried," he said, taking a seat to rest his injured leg.

"Just thinking about how to help the kids forget what happened here."

"Is that all?"

I made a face. "No. Drake will be here soon."

"That bad?"

"Things didn't go well the last time I saw him. What if he takes Morgan away?"

"The child is his son, Cara."

"But he won't take care of him. I mean, what's wrong with Morgan staying here and growing up with the other kids? If he goes back, we may never see him again."

He held my hand. "We'll make sure we repair things with Drake."

"He's not going to be happy when he sees this," I said, nodding at our hands. "He has a massive chip on his shoulder as it is. This will just make it worse."

"If you want me to leave before he arrives, I will."

"That's not what I want at all." I grasped his arm. "Don't leave. Not yet."

"I must go soon. You know this."

My shoulders drooped. "I know. It's hard, loving a king."

He tipped my chin with his finger to hold my gaze. "Do you really love me?"

"You know I do."

He ran his hands through my hair. "I love you, too, but what if that's never enough? What if this just slips through our fingers when we're separated?"

A shiver of apprehension ran down my spine. "We were never going to have a normal life though, right?"

"Is it so bad that I desperately want normal? That I feel I could give up the power and magic for happiness? This isn't my imagination. It isn't a trick or magic. It's true, and it's real, and it feels everlasting. But it's not for us to take and hold and keep. Not without harming others."

"Just because we won't have the happiest ending doesn't mean that it won't be happy. Maybe we'll appreciate the time we spend together more because of the distance."

He ran his fingers down my back. "You really are my punishment. Always just out of reach."

"Before she died, Donella claimed that she was the one who came up with the whole idea of taking Sadler's wife away. You thought you were helping him, but she really wanted to punish him."

"No. I've told you before that I own my sins, Cara. I can't blame anyone else for the things I've done. Does it bother you? My past?"

"Not as much as it should." I bit my lower lip. "I couldn't imagine you doing the things you did... until I saw you with MacKenzie. You looked... capable of anything. And I'm not scared or repulsed or anything, but I know what it's like." I lowered my voice. "The taint is in me, Brendan. I can feel it coming alive when I get angry or... or..."

"Or act more like us fae?" he offered.

"Exactly. I'm scared that it'll be all I am someday. That it'll control me. The mirror showed—"

"The mirror's gone. It sought you out for a reason, and that was to cause chaos. And some believe you're the most chaotic thing to have ever happened to the fae. All of the followers of Chaos have come for us in one way or another, but we're winning."

I looked away. "Until we find that cup, we're doing nothing but playing a waiting game."

"We'll find it. The whole realm is seeking it out."

"MacKenzie said he knew how to take his god's power. Do you think somebody else might try to do that?"

He made a sound of disgust. "Who would dare?"

"Drake's surprised us before," I said quietly.

"You'll have to trust him. You cared for him once. Can't you see the good in him anymore?"

"I don't know that he has any anymore. He scares me sometimes."

"The old me would have scared you, too," he said sadly. "I would have disgusted you."

I glanced at him. "Did you love her? Sadler's wife, I mean. You said your feelings changed when you spent time with her. That you felt sorry for her."

His cheeks flushed. "I don't like to remember. It wasn't love. Perhaps lust, but more likely a wish for... something more." He held my hand. " _This_ is more than lust. This is when souls meet souls and intertwine. Your soul touched mine and made me a better man. And now my soul wants more."

"You're a secret romantic," I scoffed in mock horror. "That's how we can tell it would never work between us."

He grinned as he held me closer. "Don't they say that opposites attract?"

Bran popped into the room to tell us that Drake was on his way. He grinned at the sight of us embracing. "The lookouts can see him approach."

"Thanks." I reluctantly let go of Brendan. "I suppose we should get the kids ready to greet him or something."

Bran left, and while the others prepared the children, Brendan leaned against me to whisper in my ear. "Go easy on him, Cara. He's not a happy man."

I wished Drake could care for Brendan the way Brendan cared for him.

By the time Drake arrived, we were all waiting impatiently outside. Vix jumped from one foot to another in anticipation of seeing Rumble again.

When the first horses arrived, Rumble was amongst them, hurrying to get home. He dismounted and knelt at my feet.

"Oh, get up, you big fool," I said, pulling at his arm to force him to his feet. "We've missed you around here."

"I was best suited elsewhere," he said, allowing himself a small smile.

Vix slapped him on the back in greeting, and a number of Darksiders called out greetings, which appeared to surprise Rumble. Once, he had been a bit of an outsider himself.

I inched closer to Brendan as Drake approached. He looked thinner, older, harsher than before. I wondered how much he remembered of my last visit, and I ducked my head in embarrassment at the memory.

"Dada," Scarlet said from her place at my feet, and I looked up in surprise.

Drake gazed at her with wide, hopeful eyes that contained a spark of what had made me fall for him the first time we'd met.

But Scarlet's hands were out for Brendan instead. I froze, horrified, as she said the word again. She didn't know, didn't understand. The other children in the nursery didn't have fathers either, but the children who had come to the castle for safety did, and she had picked up lots of new words and phrases recently.

Brendan scooped her up and swiftly changed the subject, but the light in Drake's eyes had already faded.

His lips twisted into a dark, sneering smile, and I knew we had just taken ten steps backward. "Does my heir still live?" he asked coldly.

I beckoned Polly to bring Morgan to him, but he didn't even look at the child.

"He's thriving," I said. "And he—"

"I'll take him back to the Silver Court as soon as the blight is over."

"Drake," I said, taking a step toward him. "Why not leave him here with the other children? He'll get—"

"I'll take him back when the blight has ended." He held up his hand as if to silence me. "Have we information?"

I rubbed my arms, feeling a chill from the ice in his tone. "Everyone in the realm with knowledge of the old stories is on the search right now."

"From what we've been told, we likely won't be able to kill this god of Chaos," Brendan said. "But we may be able to send him back to sleep with the help of all four legendary treasures."

"To sleep?" For a second, Drake's expression lightened with curiosity. Then his gaze fell on me and hardened again.

"The god was sent to sleep lifetimes ago, and his followers worked hard to help him regain his strength. We think that all of this drama with Sadler has just been a way to feed the god. The blight is a sign of his growing power."

"We need the final treasure then. Where is it?"

I held my hands behind my back, trying to hide how they shook. "We're trying to find out, but if you could—"

He turned on his heel. "Send me a message when I'm needed then. I'll do my own research."

"Drake, wait," I said.

He stopped.

"I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you, the way I acted, in your court. I was upset and scared and could have handled it better."

He turned to look at me coldly. "I have no idea what you're talking about." His upper lip curled. "And you're someone else's problem now."

He kept walking, and I made to follow, but Brendan held my arm. "Give him time to adjust."

"He married somebody else. He had a child with her. How could this possibly hurt him?"

He looked at me pityingly. "Because he didn't love her."

We went inside. The court was slowly returning to normal, but I had moved the nursery and my quarters to the other side of the castle. I felt that Setanta needed his mother, so I'd decided to send him with Conn and a troop of Donncha's men to visit her at the Hollows before she returned home herself.

Brendan had to leave, too. "I'm going to organise people to travel to Yvette's home and clear it out," he said. "There may be something useful hidden there."

"Good luck," I said. "Although you'll probably get lost in there."

He reached down to kiss me. "You'll just save me, right?"

"You know, some men would feel emasculated by having to be saved by me all of the time."

He grinned. "Good thing I'm as cocky as you always make me out to be."

Laughing, I waved him off. Others left, too, those who had come to us for safety as well as those from the other courts. With so many of my friends gone, the castle felt empty, so I decided I needed a distraction before anything else went wrong.

I gathered a large group with me to travel to the human realm with my children. Aside from a visit to our farms, I took them to see my grandparents and Zoe, who were delighted to hear from us.

While my grandparents cooed over Scarlet and pretended not to notice when I avoided talking about my mother, Zoe and I settled on the sofa with Lily.

"She's come along a lot," Zoe said. "I worried about you, taking on not just somebody else's baby, but a sick one, too."

"It's not like I'm alone." I sighed. "I don't get to spend as much time with them as I'd like."

"Maybe it's time you came home then. I could help you look after the girls."

I took her hand. "Zoe, I'm never going to come home for good. It's too late for that."

"But everything is so dangerous back there. What if you get hurt?"

"What if I don't? I can't just leave now when we're finally getting somewhere."

"It doesn't sound like you're getting anywhere. You're still looking for the same bloody cup you haven't been able to find for the past six months."

"Other things keep getting in the way. Besides, what am I going to do here? Get a nice little office job again? Then die of boredom?"

"You always did have a death wish," she muttered under her breath.

"Just get your camera out and take some photos of the kids, please." I nudged her. "If that's not too much trouble."

She made a face. "Trying to give me something to remember you by?"

"Of course not!"

"What's this in aid of then?"

"I want to send some photos to Drake. He hates me so much he'd rather stay away in order to avoid me."

"Why? Because of Sorcha?"

"It might be more to do with Brendan," I said shyly.

She looked at me, agape. "You didn't."

"We're not together." I shrugged. "But we're not _not_ together either."

"What the hell does that mean?"

I grinned. "When he was gone, I felt like my heart was being torn out of my chest. I couldn't stand the idea of not seeing him again. And having him home but still being unable to see him was unbearable. I couldn't take it. When I saw him lying in that bed while I waited for him to wake, I just... I forgot the reasons I was scared to get close to him. We can never be together properly while we run two different courts, but that's the price we pay."

"That sounds kind of painful."

"Well, what did you expect?"

She sighed. "I don't know. You're happy though, aren't you?"

"I'm scared of how happy I am right now," I said. "I feel like it's going to send me hurtling into disaster."

"Try not to jinx yourself," she said, rolling her eyes.

I stayed there for a day, trying to trick myself into forgetting that I missed Brendan. But I did miss him. Then again, I always had. His appearances had always been the highlights of my life. And I had always felt a relief when he returned that was different than the high I got from Drake's touch. It was different, and I was glad.

We arrived home to a changed castle. "Wow," I said, in awe of the clean surfaces. "Somebody's been working hard." There had been so much blood, so many bodies, and now it looked as though there had been no battle at all.

"They wanted to surprise you," Rafe said. "Give you a gift that nobody else can give."

I smiled. "I'm just grateful to be home."

"Is it home to you?" he asked.

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be." My face fell. "But I have to leave again soon. If we don't find the cup..."

"We all know you'll find it. You've accomplished everything you set out to do. It takes time to uncover four treasures, and you already have three. That's more than anyone could ever have expected."

"Did Sadler have any hiding places that I don't know about?" I asked, trying to dispel the worry that Bart or the glaistig had taken the treasure with them when they left.

"We're certain we've uncovered them all," he said sadly. "I'm sorry, my lady."

"Don't be. I'll need to leave for the blackthorns tomorrow. Can you organise my trip please?"

"Of course," he said. "Who's going to leave with you?"

"I'll need Vix and Bekind to stay here with the kids, and Dymphna probably won't want to leave Eithne already, so it might just be Rumble and me. If Dubh's well enough, I'll take him. I could go alone, but—"

"Please take a larger group with you," he said. "In case there are attacks. Many enemies are still out there, my lady."

"We'll see," I said, yawning. "I'm going up to the children. I'll talk to you tomorrow, Rafe."

Upstairs, Bekind and Vix were sitting in the nursery with the children. I joined them, picking up Lily for a cuddle after Scarlet had given me a whopper of a hug.

"Where's Orlaith?" I asked.

"Sleeping," Vix said. "She's exhausted."

"I don't think we need her anymore," I said. "Not all night."

"Do you finally trust us?" Vix asked.

"With my heart," I said with a smile.

Bekind was in her human form for a change. "Let's put the children to bed. You all look exhausted."

"I'm leaving tomorrow," I said. "I'm going to the blackthorns to speak to the guardian witch woman there. She might know something."

"Wouldn't she have told you already if she was going to?"

"Last time she kind of went into a trance and had a bit of a prophetic seizure," I said. "Next time I'll be prepared. I forget half of what she said, but maybe if it happens again, it'll make more sense."

"We could send for her," Vix said.

I shook my head. "If she leaves the blackthorns, the trees will die. I promised her I'd find a way to save them."

"Then you will."

After we settled the children into bed, Bekind joined me in my room. Instead of curling up next to me as a cat, she sat on the bed and talked as a woman. "You look as if someone switched on a light inside you."

"Maybe they did." I sighed. "I knew I cared about him, Bek, but I didn't realise how content I'd feel just... spending time with him without wondering about his motives."

"He's very handsome. And he's strong and masculine. I'm sure those are attractive qualities, but—"

"It's more than that. I mean, we haven't exactly gotten a moment alone together lately. So far, it's probably the most chaste relationship I've ever had."

She looked taken aback. "Brendan? _Really_?"

I couldn't help but laugh at her expression. "He's one of the greatest friends I've ever had. He listens to me, and he respects me, and he doesn't act as though I can't accomplish things. He doesn't freak out when I think for myself. He treats me like... an _equal_ , and I appreciate that from him. He doesn't have to be so attentive. He's as stressed as I am. But he's always been there for me, even when I didn't realise it. There's always been chemistry between us, but this _is_ something more."

"And where will it go from here? This won't be the last time you're separated."

"I know. And I'm not going to pretend to like it at all, but if the lonely spells are followed by bright patches, then it will be worth it."

"You really do love him, don't you?" Her shoulders shook, and I wrapped my arms around her. "I still remember how that feels, and I'd hate for you to endure the pain that came afterward."

"Oh, Bek," I whispered. "I'm so sorry."

"I killed her," she said. "I killed the woman who destroyed my life, and I thought it would make me feel better, but it doesn't. I feel the heartbreak as keenly as if it had just happened. I don't want that for you. I never want you to feel this sorrow."

She lay in my arms that night, and I comforted her as best I could, but I couldn't help thinking about Bekind and how I would feel if I, too, lost my daughter and the man I loved.

# Chapter 16

In the end, Rumble and I left with a small team of soldiers. Most of them had been with me when we had once hunted our scout's murderer. That event had made me certain of their loyalty, but I hoped we wouldn't run into any fleeing enemy soldiers. I was sick to death of blood. I was tired of journeys, too, weary of leaving my home behind. I just wanted to settle down and have a normal routine. I was missing out on important time with everyone I cared about.

We rode hard and fast, taking every logical shortcut along the way to bypass anything that might slow us down. We rested only when we had to, deciding to aim for an inn and switch horses there.

A shiver of nostalgia ran through me when I caught sight of the crooked little building off the side of the road. There were more animals and a larger stable than the last time I had been there.

A man named Ivan ran the inn. A friend of Bekind's, he had helped us on our way to rescue Brendan from the Fade by giving us food and a certain faery horse.

Ivan, an obese man with a gleam of sweat ever present on his bald head, met us outside the inn, clutching a heavy shawl around his shoulders as though he might perish with a chill. "We heard you were passing this way. We dared hope for a visit."

I gestured toward the buildings. "You've expanded."

He tittered behind his hand. "I may have let slip that royalty has taken refuge here on occasion."

"And I thought you were good at keeping secrets."

His eyes widened. "I have my tongue, you see."

Unlike some of his servants.

"We need to exchange some horses if you have any to spare. We'll swap back on our way home."

"Of course," he said enthusiastically, delicately patting the sweat from his brow with an embroidered handkerchief. "I have enough for all of you." He eyed Dubh wistfully. "That horse never returned to me."

I glanced at Dubh, surprised. "Was he supposed to?"

"That kind chooses his owner," Ivan said. "Don't expect him to be yours forever."

"Oh." I gripped the reins as though Dubh were about to run off that very second.

"We'll take care of the horses." Ivan rubbed his hands together. "Now let's get inside. You might as well have a decent sleep and some food before you leave again."

We followed Ivan inside the building. He did his best not to touch any of us, recoiling away as though we were diseased. I didn't take it personally. He led us through the door to the right and into a large dining room. It was half full, and when we entered, the noise and chatter in the room went silent only to be followed by a great deal of whispering.

I looked around then chose an empty table for myself and my soldiers. "Feed them well," I told Ivan. "We've a long way to go still."

"I will." To my dismay, he performed a dramatic bow at my feet. "Anything for a queen."

I exchanged a knowing glance with Rumble then took my seat. Before long, goblets of wine were pressed into our hands by pixies who, inevitably, flirted with the soldiers. One attempted to flirt with Rumble, but he scared her off with a glare.

"Meanie," I said. "They're just having some fun."

"Fun is not on our agenda."

"Haven't you ever thought about settling down?"

He allowed a small sound escape his lips. "Not with anything so frivolous."

I observed the other guests while we waited for our food. They were all staring at us, gaping as though we were some kind of spectacle.

"Of course they stare," Rumble said when I mentioned it to him. "Most of them have never seen anything like you, and never will again."

"What, a human?"

He smiled. "A queen, my lady. The way we live isn't the norm."

The pixies returned with steaming bowls of stew. The attention from the rest of the room never faltered. Although many fae watched us with curiosity or even awe, one group in the corner kept shooting us irritable looks. And when my soldiers noticed, they glared back. It was probably better for us to carry on than cause trouble in Ivan's home.

He came to us when we finished. "I've organised the best rooms for you."

"I'm sorry," I said, "but we should keep moving. Perhaps on our way home," I added when he looked disappointed.

I had intended to leave Dubh at the inn, but he refused to be stabled, and I decided it was safer to take him with us. Although his leg was still healing, he showed no signs of slowing down.

Ivan waved us off sombrely.

"He enjoyed showing you off," Rumble said. "He could easily have fed you in a private room, but he wanted everyone to know the Darksider queen had visited his inn."

"Not everyone seemed impressed."

"Can't please everyone. I believe he suffers from a curse of some kind. He's to be pitied."

I looked over my shoulder. Ivan was still standing there, watching us. "Maybe that's how Bekind knows him, how he had Donella's horse, because she cursed them both."

"Bekind is to be pitied, too. She leads a lonely life for an immortal."

We continued on our journey, avoiding villages and small tribes. But we did pass a surprising number of little camps, recently used.

"I don't like it," Rumble said as we investigated the latest one.

"It's just a camp," I said impatiently. "We don't have time to stop at every single one so you can feel the warmth of the embers or whatever the hell it is you're doing."

He ignored my irritation. "MacKenzie's men could easily have made it this far by now. I don't like the idea of leading our queen right to them."

"The camps are tiny. It's not like an army is roaming the forest. Anyone could have camped here." I grabbed Dubh's reins in order to mount him again. "We've come this far. We may as well see what the witch has to say. We've been helping her, so there's a chance she'll tell us more this time."

"But can we trust her words?"

I sighed. "We don't have much choice."

When we finally arrived at the blackthorns, the witch's dusty domain was slightly less arid than before. The moon wasn't full, so the creepy stick men hadn't come to life, but it was still eerie to walk amongst the dying blackthorn trees. The water hadn't been enough, and I wondered if I was too late to save the blackthorns, too.

The white raven squawked overhead, as though following our journey. My soldiers grew uncomfortable, and I understood. The area was so desolate that it felt hopeless, as though nothing we did could save the realm.

We found the old woman. She might have been a guardian or a witch; all we really knew was that she was the final life source for the blackthorn trees.

She sat on a stool in front of her hut, gazing upward. She must have known we were there, but she ignored us.

"Wait here," I told the others. "I want to speak to her alone."

"Are you sure?" Rumble asked warily.

"I'm safe. Don't worry."

I left them waiting while I headed over to the witch.

"Back again already," she said without looking at me. "Cleaning out your closet, one skeleton at a time."

"I'm going to finish this for good. I just need to find Dagda's cup."

"The cup? Oh, is that all? Good luck with that." She looked at me, folded her arms across her chest, and huffed. " _Just_ , indeed."

I knelt at her feet. "I have three legendary treasures. I need one more. Do you know where it is?"

"Know? How would I know?"

"Any ideas then? There has to be some story, some memory, something that could help us. Something to do with Manannán maybe?"

"Don't speak of the gods so casually." She gripped my arm. "You must—" Her black eyes turned white and drew me in as her voice became mesmeric. "Seek the lagoon for the cup. And then four treasures will lead one soul through the gate of the gods for judgement. Temptation holds many choices. Realm, parent, child, love, soul. The vessel must sacrifice." As quick as it began, it was over, and the woman's eyes were normal once more.

She let go of my arm, looking momentarily confused.

"The lagoon," I said, trying to keep my composure. "Does that help?"

She froze.

"What is it?"

She waved a hand. "A legend. A tale whispered to children to help them sleep."

"If I've learned anything in the faery realm it's that _everything_ is possible. Tell me what you remember."

"But it's so..." She covered her cheeks with gnarled fingers. "I had half forgotten, it's been so long. There is one place, a lagoon, but I'm not certain it even exists."

"Where is it?"

"How should I know?" She chewed on her lip and lowered her voice. "But of course. It would explain so much. How could we have forgotten the legends?" Her eyes glittered with excitement.

I had never seen her so animated before. "So you do know something about the cup then?"

"If it's anywhere, it'll be in the lagoon. Of course it will. The hidden lagoon, where the mermaids are guardians. Under the water is a cave, and they say a god hid there once, that there are untold treasures hidden within. Perhaps they meant _actual_ treasures."

"But where is the lagoon?"

"Past the faery stones," she said as though I were stupid.

"Faery stones?"

"Twelve mermaid princesses sought a spell that would give them legs. They exchanged secrets with their father's enemy in order to achieve their greatest wish. Every night, they shed their scales like an extra skin to dance on grass. Before dawn broke, they dressed in their scales again and jumped into the water as mermaids. But their father discovered their treachery and said if they were so ashamed of their scales, then they could go without. He followed them one night, and while they danced, he hid their scales where they couldn't reach them. They froze in the middle of their dance. Their father took the rest of his people and left, cursing his daughters to forever guard the lagoon."

"Did they happen to turn to stone?" I asked wryly.

"You've seen them?" she asked, surprised.

"Let's just say I've bumped into them."

"What is it about humans..." She waved a hand. "Well, then, you already know. They guard the lagoon that may hold the cup you seek."

A rush of relief ran through me. Finally, we were getting some answers. But when had anything ever gone the way we'd planned? "And if it's not there?"

"Then we are lost."

"Let's hope it's still there." I glanced around and frowned. "Has the water we've been sending you not helped?"

"The water prolongs our death," she said sharply. "The realm has been poisoned for too long." She held my gaze. "Chaos strengthens with every twist of your journey, and with him, his blight. It's growing in you, too. Soon, you'll be lost, and the rest of us will follow. It's gaining power, feeding from you."

I shivered. "The taint is feeding from _me_? How do I stop it?"

She shrugged. "End the blight."

"Can I kill a god?"

Her expression rooted me to the spot. "Nobody knows what you're capable of. Now go find your lagoon and look for the cup. Let's see how many more turns you can take."

Unsettled, I returned to the others, who were waiting impatiently.

"Did she tell you what you wanted to hear?" Rumble asked.

I was about to say no, but I had gotten what I came for. "She thinks the cup was hidden under a lagoon. And I think I know _exactly_ where."

On our way back, we stopped at the inn once again, but although smoke twisted from the chimney, nobody came out to greet us.

"We'll get our horses back," I began, but Dubh stamped his feet and refused to go any farther.

"Hold," Rumble said. "Let me take a look around."

He dismounted and headed to the stables. When he returned, his expression was grave. "No horses. There's a body. Beware, all of you."

We investigated the inn. To my horror, Ivan's body had been nailed to a wall. Every room we searched was full of corpses. There had been a massacre after we left the inn.

"What the hell happened?" I murmured, trying not to look at a wide-eyed pixie whose body had been torn apart.

"In here!" one of my soldiers called.

I ran into the kitchen with Rumble. More bodies. More blood. And one pixie moaned, miraculously still alive, despite her injuries.

I hurried to feed her a leaf for the pain, but even I knew she couldn't be saved. "What happened here?" I asked. "Can you tell us?"

After a sip of water, she made an effort to speak. "When you left, some of the guests revealed themselves as... your enemies. Ivan protested the way they talked of you. They spoke about ambushing you in the woods, and our other guests were horrified. It... they drew swords. They attacked _everyone_ , stole our belongings, and left."

I looked at Rumble, my lips clenched tight. It was our fault it had happened at all. "We'll find them," I said after a moment. "We'll punish them for what they did here."

She nodded and relaxed. "It doesn't hurt so much anymore."

"That's good. You should try to sleep for a while."

"I'm so tired." She closed her eyes, never to open them again.

In the meantime, the rest of my soldiers had finished searching all of the rooms. The gory scenes confirmed the pixie's story.

"We can't go home yet," I said.

"What about the cup?" Rumble asked.

My skin prickled, reminding me of the twists and turns in my journey, but I didn't see any other choice. "We have to find the ones who did this. They must belong to MacKenzie."

"It could take days," one of the soldiers said.

"Then we had better get moving," I snapped.

"We'll easily catch up to them," Rumble said. "It's been raining. Their tracks will reveal them to us."

"Let's go," I said, furious at the needless deaths. "Why couldn't they have forgotten MacKenzie and put themselves at Leonora's feet instead?"

"Some men can never let go of what drives them. And it's MacKenzie's wishes for chaos that drive these men."

For the thousandth time, I was grateful I hadn't married that madman. But was it madness to crave power? If I had given the Darkside to MacKenzie and Donella, it would have saved a war, deaths, and I would have been free to go where I wanted. But I doubted the pair would ever have allowed that.

We gathered our horses and followed tracks our scout found in the woods nearby. We kept on riding until we caught up to the group who had attacked the inn. By then, they had gotten drunk on stolen wine.

I rode into their camp on Dubh, knocking over their bottles. They all managed to find their feet and their weapons, but my soldiers had already surrounded them.

"You should have sided with Leonora," I said without pity. "Kill them all for their crimes." I didn't feel guilty, and I didn't hesitate either. These people had destroyed lives for nothing, and that made _their_ lives null and void.

I turned my back on the dead bodies even before my men had cut them all down. "Take the horses," I said, and I rode on, this time, for the Green Court castle.

# Chapter 17

On the way to Brendan's castle, my companions seemed invigorated by the battle. I understood it, but I tried not to encourage it. I had to be careful of the emotions _I_ put across. Foster the wrong sentiments, and everything would be lost.

"Are you well?" Rumble asked as we rode. "I know you were disturbed by what you witnessed at the inn, but you were quiet even before then."

"Just thinking about the cup," I lied.

"You have a lead."

"That nobody else has thought of?" I shrugged. "Doesn't quite seem possible."

"Sometimes it's about asking the right person the right questions."

"I love it when you're sensible."

He smiled, a warm, loyal smile that reminded me why I was roaming around the faery realm when I could be hiding in the human one. But would people like Rumble remain loyal if I revealed what the blackthorn witch had told me? If her words were true and I was unwittingly helping Chaos, then maybe everyone would be better off if I wasn't around.

We continued our journey, meeting the occasional traveller along the way, more as we neared Brendan's territory. At one point, I saw a bird fly up from within the woods, and I knew someone was sending a message that the Dark Queen was riding through the Great Forest as if it were no big deal.

Even farther along, I thought I saw a flash of green rushing past. I wondered if it was a scout. It likely was, because before we even caught our first glimpse of Brendan's castle, he came galloping toward us with Bran and a group of soldiers.

"What are you doing out this way?" he asked when he grew near.

"Getting info," I replied. "What did you think I was doing?"

He pulled up next to Dubh and grinned. "I couldn't even imagine. Did you find anything out?"

"Maybe. Have you heard a story about a lagoon guarded by mermaid princesses?"

His forehead creased. "A lagoon? Perhaps. But it's a mere story."

"Except what if it isn't? The witch told me about it, said it may be an old truth, that there's a hidden cave with wondrous treasures inside. I'm thinking _the_ treasure."

"Even if it is true, how would we find it? I grew up in this realm, and I never came across any lagoon."

"But _I_ have! I've been there before. When I was lost in the desert, I ended up at the stone statues, remember? Well, the blackthorn witch said that they guard the lagoon."

His expression shifted into one of excitement. "I remember. Could it really be?"

"I'm going to find out either way," I said firmly.

"Good work getting the witch to talk," he said, turning his horse to trot alongside me. "I know my own people tried to connect with her and failed."

"I sort of did her a favour."

"Why am I not surprised?" He thought for a moment. "But that doesn't mean the cup is actually in the lagoon."

"I know. But at least we have a place to look now. Better than sitting in our castles waiting all day."

"I work hard," he protested. "Were you coming to visit me?"

"I thought you should know about the lagoon." I yawned. "We're on our way there now."

"It can wait another night, surely. Let the horses rest." He gestured toward the extra horses. "All of them. I'll travel with you on the morrow. If we find the cup, we can go to Drake together and save time."

I had to admit I was relieved at the thought of a good night's sleep. "Sounds like a plan."

We rode back to his castle, where we were greeted by a standing guard and a sprite. Little Realtín flew around our heads, her light shining that soft golden colour I had seen only once before.

"You're here," she squealed. "We missed you!"

"I've only been gone an hour," Brendan joked.

"Oh, you!" She flew onto my shoulder. "I like when you're where I can see you."

I laughed at her, secretly pleased. "You're an idiot, Realtín. Where's Grim?"

"Inside. He has his nose in dusty old books as usual." She wrinkled her own nose. "Brendan's made him boring."

"See?" Brendan said. "I get the blame for everything."

I grinned at him, and I must have held his gaze for too long because Realtín let out a little shriek. "Cara Kelly! Have you been—"

I muffled her words by plucking her off my shoulder and stuffing her down my top. "Shut up," I whispered.

She peeked out of my shirt to glare at the king. "You had better not—"

"I know, I know," he said. "If I hurt her, all her friends will come torture me. I've gotten the lecture already, thanks."

We went inside to his office, where Grim was waiting. I greeted him warmly, delighted to see him again. It always felt good when all of us were together, even if it was only for a little while.

"I have news," I told him. "A possible link to the cup. We could find it very soon." Only then did I realise how tired he looked.

"Good," he said. "I can't wait."

"Everything okay?"

"We're having some trouble of our own," Brendan explained. "We lost good grazing ground two days ago. We may have offended Chaos."

"That just means we're on the right track." I tried not to think about the witch's words. I wasn't ready for any of us to make a sacrifice—whatever that really meant.

We ate together as we caught up on each other's comings and goings. When I told them about Ivan's inn, Grim appeared saddened.

"He helped us," he said. "It's a shame that led to his death."

"What about Leonora and Aiken?" Brendan said. "Are they still in the castle?"

"They're preparing to go home. Or rather, to take MacKenzie's home as their own. They'll have to fight for it, and they've lost the bulk of their army, but they still have loyal soldiers. I think that Leonora's more relieved than sad about her father. She doesn't hold it against us. At least, not yet."

"Let's hope that doesn't change," Brendan said.

Grim spent the next hour relaying stories he'd found that may or may not relate to the god of Chaos, but I was soon yawning. "I'm sorry," I said. "I just haven't had much sleep lately."

"Of course," the brownie said. "You should rest."

"We're going to travel into the desert to start our own search for the cup tomorrow," Brendan said. "I told Cara that if we find it, we'll travel straight on to Drake."

"With so many angry soldiers around?" Grim looked worried. "I hope you'll take a large troop with you."

"Perhaps," Brendan said lightly. "Cara, I'll escort you to your room." He stood and held out his arm. "You look exhausted.

"I feel exhausted." I took his arm and said goodnight to the others.

Brendan led me upstairs. "Do you want a bath or to sleep?"

"Bath. I feel grimy."

"And would you like some help with that?"

I grinned. "I'll be fine by myself."

"Tragic."

He left me with Anya, who hadn't been told I had arrived. She squealed when she saw me then insisted on doing my hair. I let her brush out the tangles when I got out of the bath. We talked about the children, but I was really dying to go to my room and sleep.

Brendan was stoking the fire in the room when I slipped inside.

"Hey," I said. "I didn't actually expect you to be here."

"Full of surprises," he murmured.

I moved to his side, and he swept me up in his arms. "This is your room, isn't it?" I said with a groan.

"King's room. King's rules."

"You dick."

He laughed and threw me on the bed. "Get in and sleep. You look exhausted. I'll try to wake you for dinner, but if you still wish to rest, that'll be fine, too."

"Thanks." But when I crawled into bed, my eyes remained open. "Will you stay with me for a bit?"

"Of course." He lay on the bed next to me. He usually brushed my hair with his fingers, but as it was wet, he stroked my bare arm instead. "Are you excited about looking for the cup in the lagoon?"

"Excited and nervous." Although I was more anxious about the sacrifice I kept hearing about. What exactly would I have to do, if I chose to walk through the gate?

"It's good to look forward," he said. "To think of the days when the blight will be just a bad memory."

"If we manage to find the cup and do whatever else needs to be done."

He kissed my cheek. "You've always found a way. Why would that stop now?"

"I keep thinking of the children. They'll never be healthy unless we pull this off. We don't really have a choice, do we?"

He slid lower in the bed until we were face-to-face. "You really love them."

"Of course I do. I love the Darkside, too. It's my home now, and I don't want to go back, but I don't want to lose the human realm either. I want both."

"There's nothing wrong with that." He ran his hand across my cheek. "And perhaps one day we'll figure out a way to have _everything_ we want."

"I have to tell you something."

His hand stilled. "What's wrong?"

"The witch didn't just tell me about the lagoon. She also said some things about me."

His expression blanked, becoming unreadable. "Such as?"

I took a deep breath. "I'm a problem, Brendan. I'm feeding this blight, or Chaos, or something. Every time I get distracted from what we really need to do, he just gets stronger, and I—"

He relaxed, and the look of relief in his eyes unsettled me. "Is that all? We're all likely feeding Chaos, Cara. This realm has been chaotic for years. It's not _you_. It's life. And the path before us is straightening every day. We're going to win. Don't let a witch's metaphors make you think otherwise."

"But what if—?"

"Let her words go, Cara. As long as the three of us work together, we can do anything."

I wanted to ask him about sacrifice, but I was too afraid to hear his answer, so I changed the subject instead.

Brendan's voice was so soothing that my eyes tried to close, but I fought to keep them open. We spoke for a while about the future—one free of sickness—and when I fell silent, Brendan carried on talking, making me relaxed and sleepy. When he stopped and tried to move, I curled against him. He stayed with me until I really did fall asleep. But my dreams were full of voices screaming at me to make a choice, and when I woke up alone, my heart was pounding.

# Chapter 18

We set out early with a troop of soldiers on horses laden with supplies. There would be no luxurious marquees or carriages for us on this trip. I had instructed Grim to send a message to my court informing them of my whereabouts.

We would be forced to step onto desert land to find the lagoon, and I only hoped I would remember the way. I had been close to what I hoped was the lagoon only once, while on the run from Sadler's men. I had been riding Drake's horse until I was shot in the shoulder with an arrow. I had fallen down a steep cliff and into the desert. Those on horseback couldn't follow, and Drake and Brendan had led them away from me. I'd walked along the River Garbh, had my first encounter with the water fae, and even hid in a tree from Caellan and Fallon, who had since become my advisers. So much had changed. So much still would.

From the river, I had followed the water fae's directions and walked until I came to a crossroads of sorts. The flowers of the goddess Brighid appeared to be leading me, but I had left the path more than once. On one of those occasions, I had come across the grove where twelve stone statues had stood, poised as though in mid-dance. They weren't as still as I had thought, and I had fled with the hand of one of those statues. Once I'd realised this, I'd dropped it, and the thing had crawled back to its owner. I hadn't looked back a second time.

We needed to find a route that would take our troops and horses as far as possible before the terrain grew too bad to traverse on horseback. But there were plenty of reasons the fae avoided the desert as much as possible. Tunnelers—tiny, vicious creatures who were too wild to swear fealty to any court—hid beneath the sand. The heat was yet another obstacle.

Most of our soldiers likely hadn't ventured so far into the desert before, but with sufficient water supplies and protection from the relentless heat, they would survive—I had, after all. But if my court happened to send people to help, so much the better.

"We shouldn't take everyone with us," Rumble said as we rode. "We should set up relief points so we can constantly pass water down the line."

"Sounds a bit inefficient. I mean, I made it through the desert with no supplies."

He gave me a wry look. "Your luck is beyond any of ours."

Grinning, I urged Dubh on. He rode as though he had never been injured. With Rumble following, I reached Brendan and Bran. "It gets pretty hot out there, Bran. We'll have to get you a pretty sun hat to protect your complexion."

He shot me an exasperated look. "I don't burn."

"Everyone burns." I had gotten some pretty epic tans in the faery realm during my time there. I hadn't wanted them, but I knew my face was currently as deep a shade of brown as my arms.

We followed the route Brendan and Arlen had figured out based on my tale, and by the time we finally grew near to the desert, everyone was getting uncomfortable.

Finally, the heat grew too much for most of the soldiers to bear, and Brendan ordered a stop right outside the desert. "We'll rest during the day and move at night," he said. "I think that'll be best for all of our sakes."

I was impatient to keep going, but the soldiers appeared to be so relieved at Brendan's suggestion that I couldn't argue.

We set up camp, and most of the soldiers dozed or at least lazed in the shade. I, however, was restless.

"Come," Brendan said. "I'll teach you to hunt."

"I'm not killing a defenceless little animal," I said.

He laughed at my expression. "But you'll eat it."

"Well, it's already dead then, isn't it?"

"At least let me teach you how to shoot an arrow, seeing as how half those in the realm seem to have your name written on them."

"Vix has already tried," I said, but I got to my feet nonetheless. "Like a million times."

He nodded at Rumble. "Maybe tell your bodyguard to stay behind this time."

I bit down on my grin and did as I was told for a change. We wandered into the forest together.

"Why is there even a desert here so close to the forest?" I complained.

"They say a godlike sea creature was once the recipient of so many sacrifices that he grew large enough to swallow an entire ocean. So the fae drained the sea away to kill him, but still he survived, dried up in the pit of a giant hole. They covered him with earth instead, and he sucked all of the moisture from the dirt, leaving sand behind."

"You don't have to make stuff up, you know."

He laughed and wrapped his arm around me as the trail narrowed. "How would you even know the difference?"

"Are you really going to try to teach me?" I was suspicious.

"If you like." He looked at me. "Or we could go for a swim."

It was so hot that I was constantly sweaty. "A swim would be acceptable. As long as neither the water nor anything that lives in it tries to drown me."

"I'll be there. There's nothing to worry about."

But as we walked, he gave me pointers on the bow and arrow anyway.

"I just have no aim," I said. "I can't make it go in the direction I want it to."

"Nobody can on their first try. That's why you practice. My mother made me practice every day. Archery, sword-fighting, dancing—"

"She made you dance?"

"Yes. It's why I'm such a beautiful dancer now," he said sarcastically. "She wanted me to be well-rounded. I had a teacher who taught me to paint, another for music—"

"You play?"

"About as much as you interrupt people's sentences. I haven't since... I came back. I wouldn't know where to begin."

"I'd like to hear you. I don't want to hire a million teachers for Scarlet just because she's an heir to a throne. Why can't I just hire you for everything?"

"You don't have to hire me. I'm already here."

I looked up at him in surprise. He always had been.

"There." He pointed ahead. "There's a large spring. Big enough to swim a little, at least."

The trees were too thick to see the water yet. "One day I'm going to visit every bit of land here. I want to see everything."

"Nobody sees everything. Where would the mysteries be then? I mean, we're already ruining a lot of great stories by tracking down this lagoon. It's supposed to be a myth."

"Why?"

He moved a low-hanging branch out of the way and gestured for me to go first. "A place where gods bathed or some such nonsense. The lagoon is known as the waters of immortality in those stories. In others, a broken-hearted human was forgotten by the faery she fell in love with and wept until her tears filled the lagoon and drowned her. In that story, it's known as the waters of sorrow. On the island I landed on to find the first tree—which is called the tree of life there, by the way—I was told they use the water of life to care for the trees. To us, this lagoon would probably be the equivalent of that."

"Think it's the same thing then?" I asked. "Could the water from the lagoon help the first trees survive here?"

"We have stories for everything, Cara. It doesn't mean any of them are right."

"Let's hope some of them are. Or we're just wasting our time here."

"We'll make our own story in that case. And one day we'll be legendary."

"You and that ego again," I said lightly. "You haven't talked much about your trip away. I thought you'd be full of stories."

"I assumed Bran would have spoken about everything worth hearing already."

I glanced up at him. "Was it really that bad?"

"I left people behind in a land where daoine sídhe are so frightened that they live underground like ants. We barely made it out of there, and when we did..." He sighed. "It wasn't an easy trip in any sense of the word. The more we learn, the less we understand. Sometimes, I wonder if any of this is true. If there really is a sleeping god just waiting to be awoken or vanquished."

"Don't give up on me now," I said gently. "We're almost there."

He smiled. "I truly hope so."

We reached the spring. The air was suffocating. "It's so freaking hot. I can barely stand it."

"Stop wearing black and you won't suffer as much."

"I'm the mascot for my court. I can't wear anything else." I stripped off my top and flung it aside, eager to get under the water.

"Steady on," he said mockingly.

I pulled him closer to me then lifted his shirt over his head. His skin glistened with sweat, and when we had slipped out of our trousers, he grabbed my hand and made me run with him. We leapt into the spring in our underwear, likely cannonballing half of the water back out again. It was warm but refreshing against my heated limbs.

"This is the best," I said before I dove underwater. It was ridiculously clear, and I could see water flowers swaying at the bottom. But no monsters, and hopefully, no oblivion.

I broke through the surface again. "Seriously, the best."

Brendan did a lazy backstroke along the length of the spring. He looked as though he belonged there.

"Did you have a swimming teacher, too?" I asked, following him.

"No, but I used to play with the water fae in the river near my father's home when I was a child."

"That sounds dangerous."

Treading water, he let me catch up to him. "I was the golden child, remember? Everyone loved me."

"Everyone loves Scarlet," I said worriedly. "Does that mean they'll turn on her when she grows up?"

"Not everyone turned on me." He pulled me closer to him. The water wasn't deep, but it was surprisingly buoyant. "My people mourned me when Sadler banished my soul to the Fade. I had a clever enemy who needed the help of a god to ruin me. Most people respected me, even when I didn't deserve it. That was probably the problem. I never learned. They just accepted that I knew best. Sometimes I think Sadler did me a favour by teaching me a lesson. I came back wiser."

"You deserve respect now."

"I'd rather have some uninterrupted time with you." He

ran his hands from my shoulders to my wrists, his gaze smouldering with intent. My skin warmed from more than just the heat of the sun.

"We're alone now," I said, holding his gaze. I moved my hands to his hips, across his stomach, and to his chest. His body was battle-scared, just like mine.

He gathered me to him, brushing my wet hair over my shoulder as he leaned in to kiss me. I eagerly met his lips, but a flash caught my attention.

A flicker of light or something. I broke away and rested my cheek against Brendan's neck as though about to whisper in his ear, all the while surreptitiously glancing at the forest beyond the stream.

I kissed his neck. "Don't freak out," I whispered, "but somebody is watching us."

He ran light fingers down my spine. "Where?"

"Behind you. There's a bunch of ferns between two pine trees. He's hidden there. I saw his sword glint in the sun, and now I can see his outline."

"Maybe it's Bran or Rumble," Brendan said. "And I _will_ kill them."

"Watching us? I doubt it."

"You stay here. I'll make sure he's alone and then sneak behind him. Can you swim with him looking at you?"

I gave him my best smile. "Of course I can."

"Fine," he said loudly. "I'll prepare a picnic, and we can stay here longer."

Shaking his head, he left me in the water. He swam to the shallow end then walked off, disappearing quickly. Humming to myself, I floated on the water with my eyes half closed. My heart beat fast, and I kept a wary eye on the undergrowth surrounding the stream. Whoever was watching us was still there, waiting like a creepy little weirdo. I hoped Brendan knocked him on the head and cracked his skull. I fumed as I floated, unable to relax.

And then there was a loud crash, and two figures came flying through the undergrowth. Brendan rolled over with our little stalker, and they both fell into the stream. I swam closer, intending to help Brendan, but both men sank under the water, and neither of them appeared to be coming back up.

I ducked under the surface to see what was happening. Brendan was attempting to pin the man, who had daggers in each hand. I swam down and stuck my fingers in the man's eyes. Brendan twisted one of the man's wrists, and he dropped one of the daggers. I grabbed it before it floated away, then held it to the man's throat. His face had turned red as he struggled to breathe. But Brendan was able to manoeuvre the man above the water. The three of us burst through the surface, gasping for air.

"Who are you?" Brendan said with a snarl, shaking the man.

"A soldier," the man spat. "Get your hands off me."

Brendan looked at me, almost apologetically. "I'll have to kill him."

"Wait!" he shouted. "I was one of Donella's men. Some of us escaped from the battle. We've been hiding out less than a mile away. It was my turn to hunt, but I got... distracted."

I climbed out of the water then nodded at Brendan. He lifted the man into the air and flung him out of the pool. I knelt over the man. He'd lost his other dagger at that point. "Creep."

"I didn't see anything," he protested.

Brendan joined me and hauled him to his feet. "We should take him back with us. Go get dressed, Cara. I'll watch him."

I dressed quickly, practically already dry from the sun. Brendan dragged the man over to his clothes. While he dressed, I kept close to the man in case he tried to run. A sudden crack sounded nearby, catching my attention. Taking advantage, the man kicked my leg, knocking me down, then ran. I scrambled to my feet and chased after him, Brendan close behind. For some reason, I didn't want Brendan to be the one to catch him, so when I sensed Brendan catching up, I threw myself at the man, full-on rugby tackle style, and we both went flying into a bunch of dead leaves and bushes.

I heard Brendan's laughter, and I took it out on the man struggling with me. I punched him and tried to pin him. When Brendan came over, the man relaxed, knowing he was well and truly caught. We hauled him back to camp, Brendan constantly teasing me. When he noticed me limping, he asked what was wrong.

"He kicked me, remember?"

"I had forgotten." Brendan thumped the man's thigh. "Now you're even."

The man shouted in surprise and pain. I shook my head at Brendan, amused.

"I never hit her so hard," the man cried.

"What a wimp," I scoffed.

"We should kill him just for betraying his friends," Brendan added.

The man whimpered.

We were soon back at our camp, the man thrown into the centre of a circle of our soldiers. He looked around in fear.

"He tells us he belongs to a group of traitors not far from here," Brendan said. "How many of you are there?"

"Twenty, tops," the man said, eager to please.

"He's going to lead some of you to them," Brendan said, lifting the man to his feet. "Aren't you?"

"Y-yes, of course," the man spluttered.

"Tonight, when it's dark and cool," Brendan said. "Until then, watch him closely."

He dropped the man and strode off. I followed. When we had both sat down next to our things, he said, "That wasn't the most relaxing swim I've ever had."

"At least it gives us a chance to get rid of yet another group of arseholes," I murmured. "This heat makes me so lazy. I don't want to move."

He rested his hand on my knee. "You can sleep until later."

I relaxed against my rug. "So can you."

He lay down and rolled on his side to look at me. "I wasn't sure, you know."

I blinked at him. "Sure about what?"

"You. I wasn't sure that you were certain. About me, I mean. We've come so close to being more to each other many times, and it's never played out. I thought of you a lot when I was on the ship, and I knew what I wanted. I knew I couldn't have it, but I knew what it was. And I didn't believe that you knew, that you were yet ready to decide what you wanted."

"Until?" I pressed.

"Until I woke up, and you were there. The look in your eyes as you gazed down on me." He reached out and touched my cheek. "Nobody's ever looked at me like that before."

"It was the first time I'd seen you in months, and I wasn't totally sure that I hadn't just killed you. It was kind of an overwhelming moment."

"I'm not prepared to let go of this so easily. If you change your mind..."

"Stop. I know I was afraid before. Between Scarlet and Drake and my family, I felt as though I had to be extra careful, to protect myself from anything that might hurt. A part of me will always be wary of Scarlet's heart, never mind mine, and that's my issue."

"So what changed?"

"I changed, so slowly I didn't even notice it really. By the time I did, it seemed as though it were too late. I hated every moment of thinking that you were going to marry Yvette. Though it didn't matter who it was. If you were married, you wouldn't be my friend anymore. That's just the way it works here. I spent a long time too scared to move on, but I've also known I had no future with Drake, and that I didn't want one anymore. By the time he sent me away, you had already gotten under my skin. And he had already cracked whatever had been between him and me. When I saw him with Sorcha, it died completely. I realised I couldn't hang on to it anymore, not for the sake of my daughter having a 'real' family. Because what's real? What other people think is normal and right? Or what makes you happy?"

"Do you regret how everything happened then?"

"I regret... the pain we've all put each other through, and the time I've wasted... _fixing_ myself, but I don't regret not ending up with Drake. Whatever we had between us just wasn't healthy. Not for either of us. He's not okay, Brendan, and I need... I need someone who's okay enough for both of us." Then I gave him a mischievous grin. "Of course the stealthy making-her-child-love-me plan probably worked for you, too."

He grinned back. "It's not so hard to like a child. They're small and sweet and they say and do humorous things. But caring for Scarlet has nothing to do with caring for you. I love you for you, not your child or your crown. I've told you things I've never told another soul. When I was trapped in Drake's body, everything was confusing, but I learned a few things."

"Like what?"

"Like that the king thought he needed to taste the world to be whole, but he really needed to keep the girl to show him how to live again. I don't want to be the king, but there's something so satisfying about doing this right the second time around that it eases the guilt of what I did wrong on my first try."

"You're going to need a real heir of your own someday," I said softly. "You're going to be under pressure every day because of it. They won't accept Scarlet, not if it means the Darkside is part of the package."

"Putting an end to the god of Chaos, and thus, the blight, will give me a lengthy grace period."

"You're such an idiot sometimes." I reached over to kiss him. "I'm pretty grateful for that. I might actually start taking myself seriously if you weren't."

"Happy to please." He covered his yawn with his hand. "Come, rest against me. We've still got far to go."

And promises to keep, I thought as I fell asleep next to him.

I accompanied the group that left that evening, along with Rumble, Bran, and Brendan. The rest remained behind to maintain camp and seek out alternative sources of water while scouts went on ahead to see if the way was clear.

Donella's traitorous soldier was still shaking, but something cocky rested behind his eyes, maybe an assurance that his people would win the battle. The camp was where the man had said it would be, but there were twice as many men. Still, they were caught unawares—and without a leader—so our people soon won the battle. In the meantime, the man who led us there had been killed by one his own. Not that I blamed them.

Those who surrendered were taken alive. I could have shipped them back to Leonora at her father's home, but I thought that perhaps they would come in useful in the desert.

We forced them to walk, carrying their own supplies. We cleared out their camp of anything useful and headed back to our own.

On the way, a messenger bird burst from the trees at roughly the place our camp had been, and that bothered me.

"Rumble, get somebody to go ahead and find out what that message was," I said.

"Concerned?" Brendan asked.

"Just wondering if we've missed anything important."

But there was no message. It had been a cry for help, or more likely, a warning. Our soldier who had gone ahead released two arrows into the air.

"That's a warning signal," Rumble said.

"Something's happened," Brendan said.

I looked back at the captives. More than one of them wore a smirk. "We need to get back."

A large number of our soldiers had forged ahead. The rest of us were left with the captives. We hurried them on, desperate to see what was going on.

When we returned to camp, we discovered that a number of scattered soldiers had joined up with a second branch of traitors—likely part of an earlier agreement—and attacked our camp once the bulk of it had left. We lost some good warriors, but our troops annihilated the majority of our enemies before they could run again. We had taken down two groups of rogue soldiers, but there were likely still more in the forest.

Our night was spent sorting out captives, organising watches, and setting up better defences. We established a base camp, and from there we would head out in small groups to find ways to the lagoon. That night had been wasted, but at least we had more supplies and horses.

By dawn, we were still working on arrangements. Travel would likely have to wait for yet another night. I was exhausted, and when Brendan gently coaxed me to my mat to rest, I was more than willing. He lay next to me and stroked my hair until I slept, but I soon woke to discover him gone. He had covered me in his cloak and left to work just as hard as any other soldier. Smiling, I closed my eyes and fell back asleep, but again my dreams were assaulted by things I wasn't sure I wanted to understand. I woke before darkness fell, hungry and grumpy, and wondered how much longer my journey would be.

# Chapter 19

"Are you all right?" Brendan asked as we trudged through soft sand in which we sank up to our ankles. "You seem quiet."

"Just conserving my energy."

I had been thinking about the blackthorn witch and her stupid prophesies. Sacrifice had been the buzz word on my very first night with the fae, and I had a feeling we were about to come full circle.

I was tougher and stronger than the last time I had been through the desert, but I had to move slowly so the rest of the group could keep up. The pace made me restless, while the heat left me mentally exhausted. Combined with my worries about sacrifice, traitors, the taint in my own veins, and the fate of the children back home, I was weary of everything.

"Is there something bothering you?" he asked. "You've been decidedly pensive lately when you think nobody is looking."

I glanced at him. If he was worried, then I had to at least give him a half-truth. "I'm just thinking about what will happen when we have all four treasures and are led... wherever we're going to be led. Don't mind me."

"I worry, too, but I feel that you were brought here for a reason, Cara."

"Don't," I said with a laugh. "I'm not the chosen one."

"Perhaps we're all chosen. Or rather, given the chance to be chosen. Perhaps the rest of us have only failed in the things we were meant to do."

"Now who's being pensive?" I teased.

He grinned, and his entire face lit up. "It's catching, Darksider."

I saluted him and sped up. We had left the horses at base camp to rest them, and walking seemed so tedious in comparison to Dubh's epic stride.

Little camps had been set up in anticipation of our arrival, and we stopped for short rests, especially when the heat grew oppressive.

"Doing okay there, Rumble?" I asked on one such break. My loyal bodyguard had been quiet for a long time, and he hadn't so much as cracked a smile at any of the stupid jokes I had made on the journey.

"May I speak to you?" he asked.

"Of course."

We drew away from camp to speak alone.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I must know. Are we to be absorbed by another court? Are you going to give him the Darkside?"

I blinked a couple of times, startled. "What are you talking about? You can't give away a kingdom."

"Then what will happen? There have been rumours about you and the Green Court for many months, even before we met. I suspected it myself, but now I see it, see how you feel, and I wonder, what will happen to us?"

I shook my head. "Rumble, you don't understand. We're not changing our courts. We're not joining together or anything else. We know that wouldn't be appreciated, and we've never planned on anything remotely like that. We care about each other, and we enjoy spending time together, but we're not, like, getting married and dissolving the Dark Court. That would be ridiculous."

"And when he needs an heir?"

My face fell. I had wondered that myself. I couldn't give him a child only to have it taken away to another court, and Scarlet couldn't be his temporary heir forever. He would have to turn to someone else eventually, and the thought of that made my skin crawl.

"We've both agreed that doing what's best for our courts is our priority. And right now, our priority is to target the god of Chaos and end him once and for all."

"You mean send him back to sleep," Rumble corrected me. "Nobody knows how to kill a god."

"Maybe we'll do one better this time. Come on, let's get back into the shade. It's sweltering out here."

But as we returned to camp, I did wonder how the hell Brendan and I ever thought we could be happy _and_ responsible.

The veritable oasis in the desert was exactly as I remembered it. The golden arch of russet and orange leaves overhanging the pathway looked spectacular.

"It hasn't changed a bit," I whispered, in awe at the thought of being so close to the very thing we needed to save the realm.

"This is where you wandered?" Brendan asked. "Of all the luck." He shot me a sardonic glance. "Again."

It was true. We had been wandering for two days trying to figure out the route I had travelled. And then suddenly it had appeared as though a mirage in the desert. In fact, I still wasn't sure how we had missed it. A huge forested area bordering the desert, and yet we hadn't been able to see it. In fact, we had appeared to be surrounded by sand only five minutes beforehand. Magic had to be at work.

"It must be a glamour of some kind," Bran said. "This just wasn't here before."

"Maybe it only shows up at certain times of day. Like your brains."

He glared at me for as long as he dared. "Now that's just rude."

I reached up to ruffle his hair. "I know. Should we check it out?"

"We've come this far," Brendan said warily. "Perhaps not all of us should pass, just in case."

We took our bodyguards and half of the soldiers with us then stepped under the natural arch. The leaves hung low, glossy and luscious, and an earthy smell hung in the air. Somehow, it reminded me of my first night with the fae.

My skin prickled as we walked along the path. I had considered seeking refuge in that place once before, and I had run in terror from it before long. Sucking in an anxious breath, I led the way to the clearing. Just as before, the grass was cut neatly, as though regularly shorn, and in the centre stood a ring of statues that sometimes moved.

"Dancing princesses." Bran stepped onto the grass and flinched. "Did you see something move?"

"Just be careful," I said. "If the stories are true and they're guardians, then they're not going to want us to spoil the lagoon or take the cup, right?"

" _If_ the cup is here," Rumble said.

"At least we'll know. Either way, it'll be another option ticked off."

"Let's go," Brendan said. "This place leaves me uneasy. Let's find the lagoon, get the cup, and be gone from here."

He looked a little pasty. Was he afraid? I had to admit there was an eerie atmosphere, but that might have been because I'd actually seen the statues move once. We carried on nonetheless. As we approached, I noted that the statue I had accidentally broken last time looked whole again.

"There's another path beyond the statues," Bran said, squinting. "We should try it and see if it leads to the lagoon."

"You first, Brony," I whispered, growing uneasy myself. I felt as though the statues were very slowly shifting to get a good look at us. But they hadn't stirred at all. _An illusion_ , I told myself. We passed the statues without any issues. I breathed a sigh of relief. I couldn't handle anything else coming to life.

We reached the path.

"Here we go," Brendan said, his eyes shining. "This is—"

One of the soldiers let out a shriek of fear. As soon as we'd stepped onto the path, the statues had begun to move, slowly at first, but then quickly, aggressively, as though about to kill us all.

"We'll hold them off," Rumble said. "You two, go for the cup, and then we can all run."

I didn't hesitate. I gripped Brendan's hand and ran down the path. There was no way I wanted to jump into a fight with creatures made of stone, princesses or no.

"Huh," Brendan said, stopping to take a second look behind him. "I would never have bet on that story being true."

" _Brendan_!"

"I'm coming!" We raced away, Brendan outpacing me, until we reached the end of the path and came out to more sand and a wide lagoon that seemed to reach out to the sea.

"That's impossible," Brendan whispered. "The sea is miles from this place, surely."

"Magic," I said, waving my hands.

"Old magic." He sounded awed. He spun around in a circle. "Do you see? Not a sign of the taint anywhere."

"Think that's down to the cup?"

"Perhaps." He grinned at me. "Or perhaps this is simply another world, or at least part of one, stuffed in the back of ours."

"What, like money down the back of a sofa?" I said sarcastically. When he looked confused, I shook my head. "Never mind."

"Where would you hide if you were a cup?" he asked.

"Nowhere. Why would a cup want to hide?" I tutted in exasperation. "We need to stop messing around. The others are getting in front of moving statues for us. Let's go under the water and find this bloody cave."

"The lagoon is huge. How are we going to find it?"

I was about to answer when I heard a splash. I looked to the water and met the gaze of a sorrowful woman. No, not a woman—she had gills and fins, and a mermaid tail. Her hair was long and flowing, and her skin so translucent, it was almost blue.

"Are you guarding the lagoon?" I asked, ignoring the way Brendan's mouth had dropped open.

She shook her head.

I moved toward the water.

"Careful," Brendan murmured.

When my feet touched the waves, the woman sighed, tears rolling down her cheeks. I felt her breath in the waves and shivered. This was some magic.

"I'm not a guardian," she said at last. "I'm a mother, mourning her children."

"What happened to your children?"

"He turned them to stone to punish them. And he keeps their salvation just out of my reach, to punish me."

"The twelve statues are your daughters?" Brendan asked.

"Yes." More of her tears fell. "And their scales are close by. My daughters would be restored if they could just touch those scales again." She looked even sadder. "But they would die before they reached the water. Woe is now my only name."

I exchanged a glance with Brendan and nodded.

"Where are these scales?" he asked.

"In a cave. There's no water. I can't reach them, and I'm forbidden from entering the cave. My daughters suffer while I wait, while I—"

"Is there anything else in the cave?" I asked.

"Many things. But none more important than the scales."

"What if we went to the cave and got them for you? We'd like to check out this cave."

"And we'd be more than happy to return the scales to your daughters," Brendan added. "We're not alone. Our soldiers could carry the girls to the water in time to save them."

"You would do that?" she asked. "But why? I've nothing to offer. I've no deals to make."

"Sometimes, there doesn't need to be a deal," Brendan said.

When the woman looked suspicious, I said, "You can show us where the cave is. That can be the deal we make."

She considered that then nodded. She dove under the water then popped her head back up a moment later. "Come on, then," she said impatiently.

Brendan and I exchanged a glance then shrugged. We stripped to our underwear and jumped into the water. We were both strong swimmers, but the waves had seemed to still when we'd made the deal with the woman. It was as though she breathed through the lagoon, made it move with her.

We swam down, and the water remained clear, letting light shine through to the bottom. It was an odd sensation, but I didn't feel short of breath, no matter how long I was under. Was the water even real?

The woman looked even more beautiful under the water, her hair floating behind her and her fins glistening as her tail moved gracefully. Finally, we reached a little gap that—according to the mermaid's insistent gestures—we had to climb through. The way was narrow, too narrow to swim, but we made it through, out of the water and into a cave. It was lit from a couple of streams of sunlight from somewhere so far above that I couldn't make out how high the ceiling was.

Brendan and I stepped into a treasure trove. It was like Aladdin's cave, full of gold and jewels and boxes and chests. There were paintings, though how they'd gotten there unharmed, I couldn't imagine. There were old coins, gold mostly, and even women's clothing that looked as though it came from many centuries before.

"Do you know what this is?" I said, panting. "This is a freaking pirate cove, a pirate's stash. How did it all get here?"

"I've no idea," Brendan said, touching the helm of a golden suit of arms. "But there's plenty of it. It's worth a fortune."

"So where's the cup? And the scales? Gross, by the way."

"I think the story is rather beautiful," he said. "I wonder if they really are princesses."

I looked up from a music box made of ivory and pearls to glare at him, but he was already laughing at me. Shaking my head, I set myself the monumental task of searching every box in the cave. It took us a while, but eventually we found the scales.

Brendan held them up in surprise. "I think this is it." The scales were like chain mail made out of what I imagined dragon scales would look like.

"So they just... put them on, and hey, presto, they're a mermaid again? That does not seem legit."

"If that's how the story goes," he said. "Let's keep looking for the cup."

But there was no longing for me in the cave, no feeling that we should be there. "I don't think it's here. We'd sense it if it was."

We kept looking for a while, but in the end, worry over our people we'd left fighting stone statues prompted us to leave.

We clambered back out of the cave and down the narrow exit. Brendan had found a bag and put all of the scales in it. He carried the bag in his hands as we swam. The woman tugged it out of his grasp, opened it, and began to cry—which made the waves build again.

She swam rapidly to the surface, and we followed her as fast as we could. Above the water, she was waiting impatiently. "Here." She pushed the bag toward us. "Get my daughters. You promised."

"What we were looking for wasn't in the cave," I said. "It was a cup that—"

"That wasn't the deal," the woman said sharply.

After everything we had done...

"Fine," Brendan said as I opened my mouth to protest. "Cara, let's go help her daughters."

We got out of the water and struggled to pull our clothes on over wet bodies.

"You don't have to help them," Brendan said. "She didn't help us."

"She showed us the cave. What would you do?"

"I wouldn't miss a chance to see twelve princesses," he said with a sly smirk. "You?"

"As if I'd deprive you. Let's go deal with this, then it's back to the drawing board to figure out our next move."

We took the scales with us and jogged back to the others. They were unharmed but having a great deal of trouble defending against opponents they couldn't hurt.

"We have their scales," Brendan called out. "Help us give them back their skins. When they turn, they'll start dying out of the water, so we must carry them back home."

One by one, soldiers grabbed scales and threw them over the stone statues. Slowly, the statues stilled then seemed to melt away. Underneath it all were very pretty mermaid girls, and when the men carried each of them back to the water, I followed to see the reunion between mother and daughters.

The waves crashed against the shore, stirred up by the faery woman's anxiety. When she saw her children, she cried out in a high, dolphin-like pitch, and one by one the girls replied in weak, screechy cries that seemed to reassure their mother.

When she had gathered all twelve around her, she looked at me and shouted, "The cup was here, but a woman came and took it. She promised to help me, but she lied."

And then she turned in the water with a flip of her tail and swam out of the lagoon, followed by her daughters.

"Well," Brendan said. "I guess we should get back to camp and finish this up."

We left the lagoon and the grove and found more of our soldiers waiting in the desert. Their mouths gaped in wonder at our appearance. "You came out of nowhere," one said.

"What are you talking about?" Brendan said impatiently. "We just stepped out of the grove."

"What grove?" Bran said in an odd tone.

I looked behind me, and sure enough, the trees were gone. We walked around for a while, trying to find a way past the magic. So much for using the water to tend to the trees of life.

"It's truly gone," Brendan said. "It was only here while the twelve mermaid princesses were cursed. Now that's all over."

"One lead down, only, oh, a million or so to go."

"Ever the pessimist," Brendan said. "Let's return."

"Where?" I said glumly. "What do we do next?"

"Track down the cup," Brendan said, sounding surprised. "What else?"

"Didn't you hear her?" I demanded. "The cup's gone. Somebody already took it."

"Took it?" Rumble said, sounding shocked. "Who?"

"Yvette, most likely," Brendan said. "I am personally going to visit her home and ransack the place. The cup must be there. Not in the library, or she would never have let us roam about so freely in there, but perhaps in her personal quarters. The cup is out there, and I'm not giving up until we find it."

"I have to go home," I said. "I need to see the children and check if Levin has come up with anything."

"We'll communicate by bird," he said. "That seems to be the fashion all of a sudden. When you leave, perhaps send a bird to Drake updating him on the situation. It might be better coming from you."

"I doubt he wants to hear from me." But perhaps the photos Zoe had taken would make him forget he hated me.

We travelled back through the desert and finally made it to base camp. The soldiers there were disappointed to hear what had happened but eager to travel onward with Brendan.

"Rumble and I will find our own way home," I said to Brendan before I left. "Now be careful."

Rumble and I took our soldiers and travelled along a shortcut close to the desert to traverse the mountain path. Our people had been busy restoring the bridge for us, and we crossed with ease.

Back at the castle, I had a tearful reunion with the children then received updates from my advisers. Everything had gone smoothly in my absence, but we had no further leads.

While the children napped, I headed up to the broken tower, where I fed the crows. They stuck around, fuelling my reputation as the reincarnation of an old warrior queen.

As I watched the birds fight over the feed, I thought about something the Watcher had said to me once before. I'd asked him how he knew things, and he had said something about the birds keeping him informed. I had assumed he meant with messages attached to their legs, but what if he meant he could actually communicate with them? After all, he was hidden away, this mysterious being who was neither human nor fae. And he'd said he Watched many things, so what if he meant he watched through the eyes of the birds themselves? Even one of the Miacha had mentioned the birds knowing our every move, insinuating that they passed the information on somehow.

Thrilled by the connection I had made, I cleared my throat, feeling a little stupid because of what I was about to do.

"Crows," I said. "If you can understand me, can you find Dagda's cup? It was in the lagoon of... sorrows, and somebody took it before we arrived. We need it to heal the land. If you find who took it, and you can communicate with the Watcher, let him know. Maybe he could tell us."

One of the birds looked up at me, but the others ignored me. And when they all flew away as one, I stared after them, feeling as though I had failed again.

# Chapter 20

With no other choices immediately available, I settled back into court life. But it was a frustrating stasis when others continued to search for something that might shed light on our problems. The crows disappeared for a time, and I dared to hope that they were helping us, too. Faery animals seemed to understand plenty that we didn't, so maybe there was still a chance.

Blue Eyes finally turned up, along with the Silver Court members who had been stranded with her—all except for Valys.

"She ran in a panic when we were on our way to the Miacha's home," one of the daoine sídhe explained. "We found her body later."

"I'm sorry for her." I mentally started planning what I could do for the child she had left in the Silver Court.

"She was a fool," the daoine sídhe said haughtily. "She would have been safe with us."

"Are you going to stay with us?" I asked. "Or are you all returning home?"

"We'll stay until we can escort the child home." She paused for a moment then said, "Unless we are called back to court sooner."

Soon Conn, too, returned, with Setanta. He cut through the crowds waiting to see me so he could greet us.

"You're back," I said. "I wasn't sure if I'd see either of you here again."

"His mother thanks you for the chance to see her son, but she fears for his health away from court." Conn's gaze darted toward Scarlet as he spoke.

My daughter almost certainly kept the tainted from death, but I'd begun to wonder if Fiadh's aspirations included her son marrying a princess someday. I decided to watch Setanta more closely after that, but with everything else going on, I couldn't keep watch all of the time.

I was on my way upstairs with Vix the following afternoon when I heard cries of pain and a loud crash from the nursery. _Not again._

Everyone in the corridor froze for an instant at the sound, as if it heralded another war. Then I was running, Vix close behind me. We burst through the nursery doors, and then I was the one rooted to the spot as I took in the scene.

Lily sat in her bouncer, her cheeks red and wet from her tears. Scarlet stood in front of her, her palms wide open, and an unsettling look of ferocity in her eyes that I had never witnessed before. She glared at Setanta, who had been knocked from his wheelchair, a bruise already marking his left eye. Eithne stood between them as if to shield the boy, and a nursemaid from the Silver Court cowered in the corner, Morgan clutched in her arms.

But all of that was nothing compared to the electric current of magic in the room and the sight of every piece of furniture, including Setanta's wheelchair, floating in mid-air.

"Stop this," I said firmly after a moment's hesitation. Nothing happened. " _Scarlet_."

Scarlet closed her fists, and the furniture fell, every piece swerving to miss the people in the room. Nobody had been hurt, but my heart raced nonetheless.

"What happened here?" I demanded.

"An accident," Eithne said quickly. "It was all an accident."

And that was all I could get out of anyone, including the nursemaid. I took Morgan from her. "If you can't take care of them, then get out," I snarled, frustration calling to the darkness swirling inside me. I shrugged it off before it could take hold. "Leave. _Now_."

The young faery mumbled something before fleeing. I was certain I saw relief in her eyes. I looked at Vix, who shrugged.

"Some don't have the backbone for this job," she said. "Can't tell the truth for fear of offending old blood, most likely." She lifted Lily, who had already calmed, into her arms and checked her over. "A bruise on her arm."

"This won't happen again," I said, addressing the children.

Setanta looked sullen. "I didn't—"

" _Never_ again." I called for Conn. "Take Setanta and Eithne outside for a while."

He obeyed without question, but I wondered what he would have done if he had been in the nursery.

I sank into a chair once the three of them had left. Bekind jumped onto my lap and purred before running off again, likely to spy on Conn and the others.

"What am I supposed to do?" I said aloud.

"Find better staff," Vix said. "Take Lily. I'll put Morgan in his crib. He's exhausted."

We exchanged children, then I beckoned Scarlet to me. She came willingly, but there was a defiance about her that I wasn't used to. I hugged both girls then sat back to look at Scarlet.

"You can't hurt people. It's dangerous."

She stared at me, and I wondered if she understood.

"But you're a great big sister." I kissed her forehead. "When everything goes back to normal, we're going to have a holiday. We're going to be normal."

I bit back on the temptation to make it a promise.

Dymphna returned to us and spent a lot of time training Eithne—sometimes with the visiting daoine sídhe. The mother and daughter had a tight, strong relationship, despite the many absences. That gave me hope for me and the girls. And Morgan, if he was allowed to stay with us. I didn't think of him as Drake's child, or even as Sorcha's. I saw him as Scarlet's brother— _her_ family—and I wanted her to have the chance to know that family. And I feared if I didn't love Morgan, then nobody else would think to.

Dubh had fully recovered from his leg injury, and the cú sídhe were both back to full health and able to be around the children at all times. The destruction from the battles with MacKenzie was being repaired, but there was little anyone could do about the damage to the land caused by the blight.

Vix and Bekind came to me every evening to discuss what our little network of spies had learned around the realm.

"Nobody appears to know where the cup is," Bekind said. "And they're all talking about what comes after the blight, which means the realm is generally confident that their rulers will deal with this issue promptly."

"We've found a number of locations where MacKenzie's army had been hidden by sympathisers. We're rooting them all out, one at a time," Vix added. "And we've verified that Leonora has gone home and taken charge without any issues. She's content with swearing fealty to you. She has no ambition, and Aiken has even less. She still has a substantial guard, and she'll be useful if there are any more uprisings."

"But keep her sweet," Bekind said wryly. "Just in case."

"Tell her about the books," Vix said.

Bekind grinned. "Brendan went to search Yvette's castle, but our ladies had already raided a number of useful pieces of literature. They were sent directly to Levin, who is on his way home to tell us exactly what he's found on his travels."

"There's been talk about Scarlet," Vix said reluctantly. "And Lily."

I froze. "What have they been saying?"

"People wonder what power Scarlet has. There are rumours she's powerful, and some wonder if she's powerful enough to rid us of the blight herself."

I shook my head slowly.

"Some refuse to accept Lily as a princess. Others claim that Lily is Scarlet's replacement should it all go wrong," Vix said.

"Do something about this," I said. "People can't think Scarlet is the key to ending the blight. They'll kill her in their attempts to save themselves."

Bekind squeezed my hand. "We've already sent out counter-rumours. There's nothing to worry about. You'll end _this_ war before anyone even comes up with an idea."

I looked up at the two of them. "What if they're right? What if she's the only one who can do it?"

"I swear to you that nobody will get past us to reach her," Vix said.

"Are you prepared to die for her?"

She answered without hesitation. "Yes. We need an heir. She's a symbol of that bright future you keep promising us is out there. She's what's keeping this court together, whether you like it or not. Let those in far-off places have their rumours, but if they come, we'll be standing in their way. You know this."

"I'm afraid for her," I admitted. "We don't have time to wait for her to grow up and fix this. That's if she even can. We're placing a lot on the shoulders of a toddler."

"And if we have to, we'll move to the human realm and wait until she's old enough to fix the land here," Bekind said reassuringly. "But we won't need to. Once you find the cup, you and the kings can put this god back to sleep. Then he'll be someone else's problem when you're all long dead. _I'll_ be around to watch for him to wake again."

I stared into the fire. Putting a god to sleep wasn't enough.

I waited impatiently in a full meeting room for Levin to return. The children were playing in the corner, supervised by Conn, Vix, Rumble, and Bekind, who was in cat form. Sitting in chairs surrounding the table that Fiadh had left us were Líle, Dymphna, Rafe, Thistle, Marron, and the twin emissaries. I fidgeted with my bracelet.

Levin was finally announced, and I breathed a sigh of relief. He had to have news.

He entered the room and took his seat. He had a laugh like a hyena, but I was glad to have him back at court.

"Have you any news?" I asked.

He exhaled loudly. "I've found plenty of stories, but none are a perfect fit. I've taken bits and pieces and tried to reconstruct them, but you know how we embellish. It's possible that none of these stories are true. I have trunks of books on the way to the castle. You're all free to look for yourselves. There's nothing coherent, and that makes me worry about what you'll be walking into with the four treasures."

"We still have to find the fourth," I said glumly.

"Most of the realm is seeking the cup. It'll turn up."

"But in whose hands? The mermaid told me that a woman had taken the cup. Brendan thinks it was Yvette. It had to be someone very knowledgeable to know to seek the lagoon and then to find it, too."

"Send us back out," Fallon pleaded. "Caellan and I can personally visit more households and tribes in an attempt to find the truth. Somebody somewhere in this realm knows something."

I nodded. "Fine, try again. It's possible the cup was taken after your last visits."

I gestured toward Levin. "Can you give us the gist of what you've found?"

"It's complicated," he said. "But I'll try to give you all the clearest view I can. I've heard tales of Dagda's cup being a cauldron that never emptied of food, but I also read about a ruthless man gaining immortality by drinking the blood of his enemies from the cup—there's more about the blood of a god granting immortality, but do gods even bleed?"

"That could be why the treasures were hidden," I said. "To stop anyone else from doing the same thing."

"Or to stop them from freeing Chaos with yet another god's lifeblood," Levin said wearily. "I've pieced together stories of what happened when this man—whether human, faery, or a mix of the two—gained immortality. Some called him a god, others a pretender luring followers who unwittingly pledged fealty to him until he gained the power of a god."

"Are there enough fae alive to grant immortality?" Fallon mused aloud.

"Brendan visited one land over the sea, but he was told there were more. There could be so many more fae out there that we don't know about," I said. "Has anyone found the elder daoine sídhe who returned with him?"

Caellan shook his head. "The last we heard was a rumour of her leaving with the trees that Yvette kept for herself. Supposedly she was on a search for somewhere to plant them. If she helped the Silver king with information, we haven't heard of it."

I glanced at Vix, who subtly shook her head. Our spies hadn't heard about the old woman either. But so far, Levin's theories had confirmed enough of the truth in Bart's story for me.

"Anything is possible," Levin continued, "but Dagda's cup was never meant to be used in such a way, so a curse befell the man. The blood grew tainted, twisting him from the inside. But he had become a god in his own right by then, and he spread his poison everywhere to force more people to follow him."

"Why is this not a common story?" Rafe asked.

"Stories get lost in the past," Dymphna said. "Even my own people lost their true origins."

Levin nodded. "So much gets distorted."

"But what happened to the man when he became a god?" I asked impatiently.

"I read a reference to the cup having the ability to undo his immortality—which makes sense, considering the cup caused it."

"Could the cup be poisoned?" Líle asked. "If it never empties, and the blood he drank from it tainted itself, could it be that the cup was ruined, too?"

"Let's hope not," Levin said. "But it may be why the god was never killed. From what I can tell, a group banded together long in the past and attempted to kill him for good."

"But there was no vessel," Líle said slowly. "They could only send him to sleep."

"Er, yes," Levin said. "They used the legendary treasures to do so, although again, how they did that is unclear. Perhaps the cup failed in its intended use."

"But they hurt him," I said. "They sent him away."

"Yes. And then the god slept. The sleep of a god is akin to death, so that could explain how the blight came from the Fade. But there must be another source as well."

"His body?" Marron's mud-coloured wings fluttered as though agitated. "Does he even have one?"

"He must, if he's waking up," I said. "He's regained some power because his followers kept his word alive, and then they used Sadler to really crank it up."

Levin's arthritis-curled hands gestured toward me. "Enough has happened in the last few years to feed a dozen gods."

"A god can't sleep forever," Thistle said. "Strength is always renewed, and power always returns."

"This is incredibly frustrating." Rafe paced the length of the room. "We know so little about our own true history."

"We need to ensure this never happens again," Levin said. "Future generations must remember our mistakes."

I thought of my little tower room. I had already made that deal with myself.

We spent the afternoon going over Levin's story, and a lot of it basically confirmed what we'd already suspected. But even if we managed to send the god back to sleep again, then what? He would come back, maybe even in our children's lifetimes. I couldn't let that happen. But perhaps another god knew what had gone wrong last time—and how to fix it.

"Again?" Bekind closed my bedroom door so the servants wouldn't hear then laid her hands on her hips. "You can't be serious!"

I shoved an extra set of travelling clothes into the open bag on my bed. "I just need... to be sure."

"Gods don't speak, Cara. They may not even exist in the way we believe. The girls need you. We need you. You can't keep leaving all the time."

"But don't you see?" I hid a dagger in my boot. "I don't have a choice. I have to act. The crows are gone, Bekind. They haven't come back."

"So?"

"So it won't be long before Darksiders stop associating me with Badb. They'll think she's deserted our cause."

She reeled back in disgust. "Since when are you so superstitious?"

I threw my cloak on the bed and ran my hands through my hair. "Faeries are the superstitious ones, not me. You and Vix said it yourselves—people are talking. If I'm moving, if I'm doing _something_ , then the focus will be on me, not on what Scarlet can do."

"What are you going to do?"

"The crows may be gone"—I gathered the cloak around my shoulders—"but Brighid's flower is still growing in the garden. I'll be seen returning to the grotto. Maybe nothing will happen, but maybe these people who need me to lead them will find something new to believe in."

"I don't want to see you disappointed, Cara."

I laid my hands on her shoulders. "We lose a little more hope with every day that goes by that we haven't found that cup. We need a miracle, and maybe we'll find the hint of one in Brighid's grotto."

"What if you run into trouble? This pilgrimage might—"

"I'll have Rumble and Líle with me. Dubh is raring to go. We'll be fine."

"Líle's not herself. She could be a problem."

I turned away. That was my fault for dredging up things Líle desperately needed to forget. "She'll be fine with me. Maybe she needs a visit to Brighid's grotto, too."

"She's so different now that she may not be able to pass."

Frowning, I met her gaze. "What does that mean?"

"Not everyone can go there. You saw what happened when you did—which is why I'm worried about this trip, by the way. We can't afford the queen to be unconscious for an undefined period of time. This other person's memories in Líle's mind has changed her. She hasn't been to the grotto since because she's terrified she won't be able to enter."

"I had no idea."

"Well, you've been too busy running around the realm to concentrate on the little things."

That stung. "That's not fair, Bekind. You know I'm only doing what I feel I have to."

"And I'm just letting you know that if you take everything by the reins, you won't have time for anything else."

"It's just until—"

"The blight is over. We _know_."

The dissatisfaction on her face discomfited me. Bekind had always supported me through everything. And she had a point. "I sound like a broken record lately, I suppose."

She snorted. "Just a tad."

"I know that Chaos is my main focus right now."

"When your focus isn't Brendan," she said snarkily.

I rubbed the back of my neck. "I care about so many of you, Bek. Everyone's been telling me I'm here for a reason, and I'm desperately trying to find out what that reason might be. If I have a purpose at all..." I sighed. "What if Brighid didn't bring me here? What if Chaos did?"

Her face contorted into indignation. "Why would you say something like that? Chaos has nothing to do with you!"

I rolled up my sleeves and made her look at my blackened veins. "Chaos has a lot to do with me. I just keep thinking that if I go to the grotto, if Brighid gives me a sign, then I'll know what it is I'm supposed to be doing. It'll wipe the fear away. I'm holding on by a thread, you know? There's so much pressure, and I have so much more to lose than I ever had before. And I... I don't want to lose any of you."

She wrapped her arms around me, her anger gone. "You'll never lose us."

That just didn't seem possible anymore.

Rumble and Líle had little in common, and as a result, our journey together was long and quiet. As a Darksider, Rumble didn't quite care for Brighid as much as others might, and as a daughter of Brighid, Líle was used to keeping her beliefs under wraps. So when we neared the grotto and were forced to dismount and cut through a ridiculous amount of reeds, the conversation didn't improve.

"Stay close," Rumble said. "I'll cut you a path."

"She should fight for it herself," Líle grumbled. "Otherwise, what's the point?"

"Why should she fight for a goddess who turned her back on us?"

"All right, that's enough," I said, getting between them. The tension was bad enough without those two attacking each other. "Rumble, stay with the horses. I'll be fine. I promise."

"Anyone could be lying in wait..."

"I don't think that's how it works," I said. "Trust me. I've done this before. Besides, if you don't believe in her, you might be stuck outside waiting. There's no point in you exhausting yourself only to have to wait for who knows how long. Set up a fire here, and have some food. We'll be back."

For the first time, Rumble took his time obeying. His lips twitched as though he wanted to argue, but finally, he nodded.

Líle moved away wordlessly, her sword in her hands. I followed suit. Soon, sweat rolled down my back as I cut my way through to the entrance.

"You seem grumpy," I panted when we were out of earshot of Rumble.

"I am not _grumpy_."

"Ooo-kay."

After a few moments, she stopped chopping and looked at me. "I'll stand guard outside the arch. Just as before."

"Nope."

"No?"

"You're going to be with me. Inside the grotto."

She looked appalled. "I _can't_."

"We'll find out, won't we?"

"I don't think—"

"So don't. Think, I mean. Just step through and see what happens. If you can't do it, at least you'll know."

"I don't want to know," she murmured before aggressively slicing the air with her sword.

"There are things I don't want to know, too."

She shot me a curious glance. "Like what?"

"About me, about Scarlet. We're both changing, and not in the same way. Do you think it's possible that living here has made us... more fae?"

"I've thought about it. I mean, it would make sense after everything you've been through. Perhaps it's more the fact that the fae in your blood _shines_ here."

"I like that."

We soon made it to the arch. Líle trembled next to me. I took her hand.

"I'm scared, too, you know. But at least we'll both know for sure."

She nodded, and when I gestured, we both took a step inside the flower-covered arch. I felt dizzy for a moment as I crossed the wall of magic. The world unbalanced and resettled until all I could smell were Brighid's flowers, all I could hear was the water from a fountain, and all I could feel was the warmth of Líle's hand in mine.

"We made it," I said.

"You sound surprised," Líle said wryly.

"Yeah, well, you never know." I took in a deep breath. The air felt beautiful—and clean. "It feels so good in here."

"I know what you mean." The veins in Líle's wings burned a golden red. "It's a pity we can't all hide in here."

"Hiding isn't living. Last time I was here, I sat by the fountain and talked, and the water froze, and I felt... _something_. What if we try to talk to Brighid about the blight?"

"What if nothing happens?"

I sighed. "Then at least we tried."

"I'm not good at talking."

"Then just hold my hand and listen." I smiled at her. "At the very least, we get this nice little break here." I reached for a flower and stuck it behind Líle's ear.

She touched it thoughtfully. "The other memories are quiet here. It's peaceful. A relief I didn't quite realise I needed."

We moved to the fountain and knelt in front of it on the cushions that rested there.

"We're here to talk to Brighid," I called.

Líle sniggered.

I elbowed her. "I feel like enough of a muppet without you carrying on."

She bit her lower lip. "Sorry. You just look really serious talking to that fountain."

"I'm not talking to the—oh, shut up, you oddball. Look"—I got to my feet and hauled Líle up after me—"we need to know how to get rid of Chaos. We just want to know if we're on the right path, where the cup is, and what to do with it. There has to be a way... oh."

I squeezed Líle's hand as the water from the fountain turned black.

"That can't be good," Líle whispered.

"Oh, my God." The flowers in the garden all rotted as one, the sweet, fetid stench filling the air and choking us.

"You don't need the cup," a woman's voice said.

I turned around, but nobody was there.

"Cara," Líle whispered. "We should leave."

"Wait. Just wait a minute."

"You already have what you need," a second voice said.

"It's the demi-goddesses," I said. "Brighid's priestesses. They're here."

"Yes," a third voice said. "And you were given a gift. It's time to return it."

I glanced at Líle, confused. "A gift? What are you talking about?"

Líle shrugged. "When they saved you, did they change you? Perhaps you really are more fae now. Because of them."

"What was the gift?" I demanded. "Did you do something to me?"

"Not us," the first voice said. "Brighid gifted you with a child. It is time to return her."

My blood ran cold. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't you see?" the second voice said. "You changed the path, got in the way of Chaos, and had a pure child."

"Brighid's child," the third voice said. "And when you sacrifice that child to the blight, Brighid will return to save us all."

Líle's fingers crushed mine.

"No," I breathed. "That's not true. It's not happening."

A violent wind blew around me. The three voices spoke as one. "Return her gift. The child was born to die, to save _us_."

"No!"

"Cara," Líle said, but I couldn't see her anymore, couldn't breathe against the wind battering against me.

I choked against a wall of air, went blind in a sea of darkness, feeling only the clutching hands of the priestesses as they tried to compel a promise from me.

"She's not a sacrifice!" I screamed, pushing back against the force around me. Pain shot through me, and then I fell.

I awoke hearing voices buzzing around me.

"You can't tell anyone about this," Líle was saying.

"You know I won't," Rumble said. "But how will we explain it if she doesn't wake up?"

"She'll wake. She did last time."

"Last time wasn't—"

"I'm awake," I mumbled. "Shut up already. Just can't open my eyes yet." I rolled over and groaned. "What the hell happened?"

"The grotto is tainted," Líle said, sounding miserable. "And the priestesses are... evil. I've lived a lie. What kind of god would demand the sacrifice of a child?"

That brought everything back to me. I sat up too quickly and forced my eyes open. My stomach turned. " _Nobody's_ sacrificing Scarlet."

"We know," Líle said, horrified. "We're not monsters." She paused. "Not all of us, anyway."

"I'm sorry," I said. "How did we get out of there?"

"I dragged you out. The priestesses separated us. They had you trapped. It... it reminded me of the hauntings. I was terrified."

"But she got you out of there nonetheless," Rumble said.

She gave him a grateful smile. "We made it through the arch, but everything died around it." Her lower lip trembled. "Nobody will need to fight their way to the arch ever again."

I pointed at the flower behind her ear. "Not everything died."

Shocked, she reached up and released the flower. "I had forgotten. It's perfect. But why?"

I tapped it. "Maybe it's a sign."

"Of what?"

I shrugged. "No idea. I'm sorry I dragged you out here. It was a waste of time. Except now we know we can't trust the priestesses to help us. They weren't like that last time, when they separated Drake and Brendan. Everything's changed."

Líle gazed at the flower for a long time. When I felt less shaky, we made our way home. Before we reached the Hollows, I noticed crows flying overhead. They had returned, after all. But all I could think about was the sacrifice. There was no way Scarlet had been born just to die for the fae. It couldn't be possible, and I wouldn't let it happen, no matter what it cost me.

Back at the castle, I trudged up to the broken tower room, unable to face anyone. As I climbed the steps, I felt as though the weight of the world rested on my shoulders. If I didn't find the last legendary treasure soon, the priestesses would find some other way to get their message out, and the entire realm would know they intended Scarlet to be the sacrifice that would save the realm.

All we had to do was find one lousy cup. How had that proven so impossible? But two of the other treasures were only in our possession because we stole them from Sadler. He had likely been preparing to free his god for good, sending the rest of us down with him.

I paced in the tower room, listening to the crows squawk and fight over the food I'd left them. I had to think of something. There had to be a way. My daughter couldn't pay the price for the rest of us. She just couldn't.

And then a crow landed at my feet, dropping a paper scroll. She squawked once before flying away. I read the scroll then sank to my knees with relief. The birds had scoured the realm and found the woman who'd stolen the cup. The Watcher had even drawn me a map. I didn't know who the Watcher really was, or what the crows stood for, but they might have just given me a way to save my daughter's life.

# Chapter 21

A groom led two more horses into the courtyard for my travelling companions.

"Why not wait for Brendan?" Rafe said. "The king will surely provide protection, and—"

"I have a daoine sídhe with me." I leaned down from where I was sitting on Dubh and patted Rafe's shoulder. "I'll be okay." When he didn't smile, I winked at him. "Relax. Between Dubh, Rumble, Dymphna, and Líle, nothing's going to get near me."

He used his hand to shade his eyes from the early morning light. "But we don't know who took the cup."

"It doesn't matter who took it. All that matters is that we're going to get it back."

"Are you certain it's wise to trust the word of a man nobody knows anything about? One who claims to be acting on the advice of birds?"

"Is it better to sit around reading books written by long-dead fae who did their best to wipe out their own history? We don't know anything for sure, but the more of us who are out there looking, the better."

"I didn't intend to offend you, my lady."

"I know." The others were ready and waiting for me. I tried to hide my impatience with Rafe behind a smile. "Just send Brendan a message to tell him I'm following a lead on the cup. Send one to the Silver Court, too."

He nodded, bowed, then went back inside.

I looked at the others. "Are you sure you want to join me?"

"The Watcher helped me," Líle said. "I owe him my life. I trust him."

"And I'm curious about what we'll find," Dymphna said.

Rumble shrugged when I caught his eye.

"Okay," I said. "Let's go out on yet another limb."

We left the castle and rode through the forest, following the odd little map the Watcher had sent us. It was full of landmarks and rough distances, but no names or anything the fae could fully understand. But we kept going, confident that it would at least lead us to a clue.

We ended up on neutral territory near the coast, but we were nowhere near Yvette's castle.

"Perhaps someone from Yvette's army moved the cup," Líle suggested.

"Perhaps it was never in Yvette's possession at all," Dymphna said.

A cold prickle ran down my spine. I thought we had identified all of our enemies. This development hinted that there might be more out there, getting in our way. A part of me wondered if Brighid could be the mystery woman.

"We'll soon find out," I said, urging Dubh onward. I kept my hand on Lugh's spear, the small piece of wood that I kept attached to my belt at all times. Nobody noticed the unassuming weapon because it was so plain and ordinary, but it was almost certainly a legendary treasure.

The sun was hot when we finally arrived at our destination. We ended up on the edge of a low cliff that hooked over the sea, a crooked tree there matching the landmark on our map.

"There's nothing here," I said, disappointed. "That's what I get for trusting birds, eh?"

"There has to be something," Rumble said.

"The Watcher wouldn't have sent us here if it wasn't important," Líle said. "He knows what we're trying to do. He wouldn't waste your time."

"Maybe he trusted the birds too much, too." As if one had heard me, a crow flew overhead then dove downward and didn't come back up.

I got off my horse and peered over the edge. Rocks jutted out of the water below, but right against the bottom of the cliff was a tiny strip of beach. "There might be a cave. A hidden cave or something down there that we just can't see from up here."

"Then how do we get down?" Dymphna asked.

"I can climb it," I said. "If we tie a rope to the tree, maybe."

"It doesn't look so secure," Líle said.

"Then you three can lower me down."

The others exchanged doubtful glances.

"I'm the lightest one here. If there's danger, I'll yell, and you can all pull me back up again."

"I'm not sure we should let you go alone," Dymphna said.

"We're here now," I said. "We have to at least try."

Rumble found a rope in our supplies. He tied one end around my waist and the other to the tree. "I'll hold you. If you really want to go."

"I have to."

"Shout at the first sign of trouble," Líle said.

"I know, I know. I'm not a martyr."

They slowly lowered the rope as I climbed over the edge and made my way down, careful not to think about how high up I was. Sharp rocks jutted out from the cliff-face, providing me with hand and footholds.

I kept climbing until I reached golden sand. Looking around, I noticed that someone had erected a couple of sticks and hung a wet towel from them. Still holding the length of rope, I moved away from the cliff, but the rope tightened, and I untied it, waving up at the others to assure them I was okay.

I moved out of their line of sight, shuddering as a chill ran through me. I found the entrance to a deep cave, partly underwater. Fishing nets lay at its mouth. I stepped over the nets and into the cave. The damp sand beneath me rose upward and out of the water. Fish bones lay scattered all around.

It took a moment to adjust to the sudden darkness, but I sensed movement within, and I finally saw her. The woman who had taken the cup. She was whispering to it, cooing over it as she rocked to and fro.

I recognised her immediately, although she looked completely different than she had the last time I'd seen her. Under her torn shift, her body was rail thin, and her arms and legs were tight with lean muscle. Her once-blond hair was white and had been roughly and unevenly cut. The walls of the cave were covered in notes and paper.

Ronnie had been a professor in my university until she'd followed me to the Provings. She had been studying faery lore for years; I should have known she'd be the one to figure out the puzzle that had confused the rest of us.

In her youth, she had been driven mad by Drake's father, and she had been the one who'd lured me in while I was pregnant so Sadler could kidnap me. She had been convinced that I was carrying her stillborn son, and she had vanished from Sadler's castle long before I managed to escape.

I sucked in a breath at the sight of the rough raised scars on her bare arms and legs. My daughter's grandfather had inflicted them on her. She heard me and looked up, but she didn't seem surprised.

"It told me you were coming," she said. She was missing half of her teeth. The cave smelled bad. I wanted to vomit.

"I came for the cup," I said gently. "We need it or the realm will die."

"You always take from me. You take my baby, my life, my Deorad. You take it all, and now you want more. When will it end?"

"Ronnie, you need help. If you come with me, I can help you."

"You can't even help yourself," she said, her voice dripping with scorn. Then, suddenly, she screamed, "Where's my son?"

I flinched. "Come with me, and I'll show you."

"I don't believe you," she ground out. "And if you come any closer, I'll kill you."

"I'm not going to let you do that. I don't want to hurt you, Ronnie, but I'm taking that cup with me, one way or another."

She dove at me, her teeth bared, and I braced myself for the attack. We fought, but when I had the chance, I grabbed the cup from where she had dropped it and ran out of the cave.

I sprinted across the sand and gripped the rope, the cup tucked under one arm. Ronnie was close behind, and I didn't have time to tie the rope around me. I climbed instead, and the others tried to pull me up. Ronnie caught the end of the rope and yanked hard, hauling herself up after me.

The sudden added weight pulled the others forward a few inches. Rubble dislodged by their feet fell down on me. I held on, kicking away from the cliff wherever a particularly sharp rock jutted out. My arm burned from holding on to the rope, and still Ronnie climbed, reaching for my ankle. Using my knees and one arm, I kept trying to pull myself up the length of the rope without dropping the cup, but Ronnie was determined to get the treasure back.

The others had almost pulled me up to the surface when Ronnie clutched my leg and let go of the rope. I screamed as a terrible, sharp pain ran up my thigh.

"Kill her," Líle said urgently as the others pulled on the rope, helping me to the top of the cliff.

"No, wait! Ronnie, take my hand!"

Ignoring the pain, I reached for Ronnie to help her, but she gripped the cup instead, completely letting go of me. The force yanked me over the edge again as I tried to hold on to the cup. Rumble grabbed my legs before I fell. I had two hands on the cup, fiercely holding on even as Ronnie's hands slipped.

"Ronnie," I cried. "Grab the rope before you fall!"

"I'll never let you take it," she hissed, and she wriggled, obviously hoping her weight would yank the cup from my hands.

"We need it more than you do," I said and pulled back.

Ronnie's hands slipped, she let out a sharp scream, and then she fell, her body hitting the rocks on the way down before coming to a stop at the base. The sand around her turned red. Ronnie was dead. But we had the cup.

# Chapter 22

"I didn't want her to die," I said sadly as I peered down at Ronnie's broken body.

"She was insane," Dymphna said.

"And the cause of half of your problems," Líle added.

Rumbled laid his hand on my shoulder. "Perhaps now she'll find some peace."

I nodded and examined the cup. It looked like a plain metal pitcher—nothing special about it except the sensation in my fingers that I _had_ to touch it. It would remain unassuming until I found a king. Ronnie hadn't unlocked the power of Dagda's cup, but I could feel the magic tremble against my skin.

"We should get this back and let the kings know it's time."

We untied the rope then mounted our horses to head home. As we rode, I noticed a difference between the treasures. The cup was brimming with a power I didn't sense from the spear. I wondered what would happen when the kings touched it.

By the time we arrived home, I had gotten used to the sensation, but I had to wonder if the cup felt different than the other treasures because of the way it had been used.

Rafe greeted us at the gates. "The Green king arrived three days ago. He's spent a lot of time with the children and insisted he wait until you return."

I couldn't hide the smile threatening to cross my face. "Thank you, Rafe. Spread the word that we have good news. I'll have to leave again very soon."

His copper curls bounced as he bowed, his shoulders twitching with excitement. I liked Rafe. His eyes might have looked sly, but he wasn't devious, and he tended to wear his heart on his sleeve. In fact, I had grown to like and respect all of my advisers. They had taken to me, and now that we were down two advisers, having lost Fiadh and Bart, we were a closer-knit group during our meetings.

Inside the castle, I slipped off my cloak and headed upstairs, closely followed by Rumble. Having people watch over me all of the time used to bother me, but I had grown used to it. Rumble was wise and cautious, and that was a good balance to my tendency to recklessness.

In the nursery, Brendan and Bran were telling the children a story. When Brendan looked up at me, he grinned. "Back at last?"

"I wasn't gone so long," I said, stooping to kiss Scarlet and Lily. "Ronnie took the cup."

He frowned. "Where is she now?"

I straightened. "She didn't make it."

"I'm sorry."

I looked at him in surprise.

"I know you wanted to save her," he said. "But sometimes you can't save people from themselves."

My face crumpled a little, and he got up to embrace me. Then he sucked in a gasp. "Is that the cup I feel? It's... wow."

"I know," I said, relieved by the change in subject. "It's crazy powerful. Maybe the stories were right about it giving a man immortality."

"How bizarre," he said, but I knew he was only half-listening. The cup was crying out to him to be touched. I held it out. "Go on then."

He bit down on a short, sharp laugh then reached out to touch the cup. The entire room went silent as we waited to see what would happen.

Slowly, ever so slowly, the plain bronze cup transformed into a tall, elegant goblet gleaming in gold and rimmed in crystals.

"It's beautiful," I said.

"Magnificent," Brendan whispered. And when he took his hand away, it quickly became a plain little cup again.

"We should let Drake know," I said.

"We'll go to him. You and I have three of the treasures. He has the last. It's time we reunited all four so we can see what they do."

A mixture of excitement and apprehension spun around in my stomach. "I'm up for that." We were getting closer to the end game. At last, I could see a finish line. And it all depended on Drake helping us. "And I think it's time to send the kids back to the human realm. We don't know what's going to happen when we bring the treasures together. I can't risk my family or anyone who's come here for safety."

"That'll be a big upheaval, Cara," he said.

"I know, but the last thing we need is for me to be worrying about the kids while we're dealing with... whatever comes next."

"Then I'll help you."

We spent the next few days sending messages to the other courts and organising moving the vulnerable into the human realm. Plenty of Darksiders were already there, away from the worst of the blight. I didn't know what was going to happen next, but I had an awful feeling that Chaos—and whatever was left of his supporters—wasn't about to let us win easily.

Saying goodbye to the children was hard, but I hoped it would be for the last time. While Rafe handled the logistics of moving the rest of the Darksider families who wanted to leave, I left the court with a small troop of soldiers and a number of my close friends, including Rumble, Vix, Bekind, Dymphna, and Líle.

Our trip was uneventful, and when we arrived at the Silver Court, Arlen, Anya, Grim, and Realtín were already waiting.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, hugging Anya in greeting.

"We wanted to be here in case we were needed," Grim said.

"You didn't think you could leave us behind, did you? We started this together!" Realtín squealed in my ear.

Brendan looked around. "Where's Drake?"

"He hasn't been attending court," Arlen said. "We haven't seen him yet."

I exchanged a worried glance with Brendan. "Bekind, can you find out what happened to Vanys's child? I want to make sure she's taken care of."

She agreed, and Arlen escorted us inside, where our procession was greeted with excitement and questions about Morgan.

I finally managed to slip away with Brendan. "Let's go shake him out of this." I winced. "But maybe you should take the lead. Last time I sort of punched him in the face."

"Excuse me?"

"It's a long story. Let's get this over and done with."

We went alone to Drake's room. He was already half-drunk, and he groaned at the sight of us. "Not again."

Brendan locked the door behind us. "We found the cup, Drake. It's time we finished what we started."

"Oh, do it yourselves," Drake said, taking a sip out of his own cup. "You'd much rather do it together anyway."

"Don't be ridiculous. The three of us are in this together. We need each other."

"I don't need you two," he said bitterly. "Not after everything you've done to me."

"Everything _we've_ done?" I cried, placing my hands on my hips.

Brendan laid a warning hand on my arm, but I ignored him. "What have we ever done to you? Look at what you've done, the children you've abandoned, the people you've hurt! All in your quest for what? You don't even know anymore!"

Drake rose to his feet, his cheeks flushing. "I had to watch you fall in love with him!"

"Oh, big deal," I said nastily. "I had to watch your marriage to Sorcha, watch you ignore my daughter, hear about your sacrifices and everything else."

Brendan took Drake's seat and poured himself a drink.

"What are you doing?" Drake demanded.

"Waiting for this ridiculous tit-for-tat to end," Brendan said calmly. "Perhaps it's time you two got everything off your chests so the rest of us can move on." He waved a hand. "Any day now."

I deflated. "He's right. This is ridiculous. Ancient history."

"It's not ancient for me," Drake said, his voice trembling. "It's every minute of every day for me."

"I'm sorry you're hurt," I said, taking a seat myself. "But we've all been hurt, Drake. Stop clinging onto it and giving it life. You're not upset because of me and Brendan, and I think that deep down you know that."

Drake fell into a chair and stared sombrely at the fire. "I knew from the first time you kissed him that this would happen. I had to watch, Cara, had to feel what both of you were feeling, and I was stuck behind an invisible wall, unable to do a thing."

"You didn't even know me..." I began, but he held up a hand in disgust.

"Everything you said to him while his soul was in my body, I heard. Everything he learned about you, I learned. We both fell in love with you because we were both there. Can't you understand that?"

"I never really thought of it that way before," I said, feeling uncomfortable. While I had been getting to know Brendan back then, growing to like him, I had thought of Drake as absent. I had never really considered how it had been for him.

"And yes, I sent you away, but it wasn't just to protect you," he continued, but the harshness had disappeared from his voice. "I sent you away to protect _me_. I knew that it was only a matter of time, and I couldn't stand the idea of watching you with him. Even if you had been with me, he would have taken you eventually. There was just something between you two that neither of you could resist."

I exchanged a guilty glance with Brendan.

"I couldn't compete," he said. "I'm still the solitary fae who's worth nothing."

"That's not true," I said. "Of course you're worth something."

"Just not as much as a real king, eh?"

"Stop that!" I clenched my fists in frustration. "Stop making out like that has anything to do with it."

"You wanted me until he came along." The bitterness had returned to his voice. "I risked my life for you, my _soul_ , and you threw it away to go to the Fade for him."

"I owed him," I whispered.

"Then what did I owe you?" he asked, sounding more sober.

"Not a thing. I know I acted that way, but I was a different girl when we met."

I had been a wimp then, unable to deal with real life. I'd given off the appearance of being tough and strong, but inside, I had been weak. I had been broken. I had blamed my problems on my parents, but I had allowed those problems to defeat me. Nobody else made me give up on life and love and happiness. But with the fae, the creatures who professed not to feel at all, I had discovered myself. I had found love, and strength, and a will to truly live. "I wasn't ready to be happy back then."

"You acted as though you were happy with me until he came between us."

"But you never wanted me to be myself," I said gently. "You wanted the ideal, and I could never have given that to you. I'm not the person you remember. You wanted to keep me human and good and innocent, but you can't protect people from life, Drake. We all have to spread our wings, or we'll never know who we really are."

"I didn't know how to... he lets you run wild, and I couldn't. I still can't. If I could send you away now, I would."

"And that would be unforgiveable," I said. "You can't just hide your problems away and hope they don't find you again. Sending me away was the worst thing you could have done."

"I couldn't bear it. I was about to be stuck in a marriage I didn't want, and he was free to flirt with you, to treat you, to indulge you again, to win your heart."

It was then I realised how like the old me Drake was acting: desperate for the one thing he couldn't have because it allowed him to wallow in his misery instead of moving on. It was as though a light had come on, and I saw everything clearly for the first time.

"I didn't fall for Brendan because he indulged me," I said, a little more sharply than I had intended. "He's a good man who respects that I can't be controlled, that I'll never be perfect. He lets me be me, and it was never meant to be between you and I. It would never have lasted. We were both intent on running in different directions in life. It couldn't have worked."

"And Sorcha actually cared about me," he said as though he couldn't quite believe it. "She was prepared to give me everything I needed, and I didn't have the courage to accept it. Everything I love gets taken away. I can't bring myself to... I can't love again. You've ruined it, Cara."

Tears ran down my cheeks at his words. I hadn't meant for any of it to happen. But he wasn't the man I'd thought he was, and he had likely never been. He was broken in a way I couldn't fix, and in the end, we had both just damaged each other further.

"A lot has happened that we can't change," Brendan said at last. "And we have a chance to change one thing that affects everyone. We need to join all four treasures together, Drake. Are you willing to help us?"

Drake sighed glumly before nodding. "It's not like I have much of a choice."

"We'll give you time to... prepare," Brendan said, gesturing for me to leave.

"Well, that sucked," I said under my breath on the way out.

"When did you two start bringing out the worst in each other?" Brendan asked as we made our way back to the others.

"Are we really that bad?"

He let out a bark of laughter. "Just a tad."

"I thought it was getting better, but it all seems so raw again. I'm not even sure this is about me anymore."

"Sorcha's death has affected him, and the situation with the children hasn't improved his mood. The sooner his son is returned to him, the better."

"And if he never treats him like his son?"

"Then we'll just have to make it up to the boy whenever we can."

"I don't know how you can say that."

"The child is his, Cara. We don't have a say in how he raises him. You can't control everything."

I stopped walking and looked at him in surprise. "Where did _that_ come from?"

He leaned against the nearest window ledge and gazed outside. "You can't bend him to your will or force him to be the way you want him to be. That's exactly the same thing you accuse him of doing to you."

"Then what am I supposed to do?"

He looked at me. "Move on. Accept that he gets to decide what happens in this court, whether you agree with it or not."

"We didn't do that for Sadler."

"Drake is not Sadler."

I lowered my voice. "He could be, one day."

He frowned. "So could Scarlet. Choose your battles wisely, or you may be the cause of the things you fight against."

My mouth dropped open. "How could you say that?"

He took a step closer to me. "Most of us fall into that trap. You worry he won't be there for Scarlet, but if you keep pushing him, you'll be the reason why."

"Are you on his side now?"

He looked pained. "Are there sides?"

I leaned against the wall, subdued. "It feels like it."

He touched my arm. "Only when you both decide to take offence at everything the other says. You've both hurt each other, and this is the fallout. It's how you get through this period that defines the outcome. Punishing each other won't make it any easier."

"I have to go," I said, and I left him there to go surround myself with people who wouldn't say uncomfortable things I wasn't ready to hear.

# Chapter 23

I opened the door of my quarters the following evening and found Brendan standing there, looking sheepish. We hadn't spoken since our... I wasn't even sure I could call it a row.

"Drake has called for us," he said. "It's time we joined the treasures together."

He turned to walk away, but I reached for his hand. "Wait."

He stopped, and I pulled him into my room. "Drake is waiting."

"He can wait an extra couple of minutes," I said sharply. "Maybe we should talk about yesterday. I mean... I think we should."

"You're the one who walked away. You're the one who always walks away."

"I need time to process things," I said. "And when my initial reaction is to feel defensive, isn't it better that I step away to think about things?"

"Is it?" He ran his hands through his hair. "I'm not interested in being the one who patches things up with you and Drake. It's not my place, and I don't enjoy bearing witness to those kinds of conversations. Do you think I like hearing his pain? Or yours? You're a knot that needs to be undone, and I'm not the right person to do that. I'm trying to see both sides, and it's turning you both against me."

"I'm not against you." I cupped his cheek. "I'm just prickly when things hit too close to home. I don't want to be the reason Scarlet doesn't have a father. I don't want the blame for that, and it's easy for all of us to lash out and play the blame game. Drake and I need time, but I don't want my time with you to become all about him."

He exhaled loudly. "It's been the three of us from the beginning. We're so closely tied that I'm not sure how we'll rearrange ourselves into anything healthier."

"Me either, but I still want to try. Do you?"

He dipped his head to kiss me. "You know I do. We're all exhausted and worried, so it's for the best if we push relationships aside for now."

He said that, but he held my hand extra tight as we walked to Drake's quarters.

Inside, Drake was waiting with the stone of destiny, his eyes clear and sober. He avoided meeting my gaze, but when I walked into the room, I held out my hand to him.

"I'm sorry," I said. "There's so much we've glossed over, but the realm needs us to trust one another. We have to work together, for all of our sakes, and I'm prepared to do it. Are you?"

He shook my hand, and the embarrassment in his eyes made me pity him. "What now?"

"I think we should all three of us touch each treasure and see what happens. Bart said that two of us can unlock the true form, but all three of us could recharge the power or something."

We set the four treasures on a table. They all looked plain, bar the sword of victory. For some reason, it never returned to its plain form.

"The cup is..." Drake whispered.

"I know," Brendan said. "It's the missing piece that connects them all. Can you feel how the power has changed now that they're all in the same room? It's dizzying."

The treasures hummed as though seeking each other out.

"Do you hear that?" I whispered.

"They're supposed to be together," Brendan said. "This is a game changer we have here."

"Then we should thank the gods that Sadler wasn't able to put all four together," Drake said.

"Are you both ready?" I asked. "There's no going back once we start. We have to finish this, no matter what happens."

The men exchanged a hesitant glance before nodding their agreement. I was the most eager, and perhaps that was because I was most drawn to the power. The tips of my fingers itched to touch the treasures.

First, I held out the small stick that was supposed to be the spear of Lugh. It was the one treasure I worried about. It didn't sing in the way the others did.

Brendan laid two fingers on the wide end of the spear, and Drake pressed his finger and thumb into it as far away from ours as possible. A rush of power surged through me, making it difficult for me to keep my balance.

Brendan reached out to hold me up. "Don't let go yet."

"It's hard to hold on," Drake said. "It feels like insects running through my veins."

To me, it was more like an electrical shock. And as the sensation hit its peak, the sky outside lit up as though shocked, too.

The stick instantly transformed into a long, sharp spear. Bands of engraved silver covered the narrow wood. We all had to change our grips just to hold on. The silver bands all lit up, and black threads ran through the indentations before disappearing.

"That's definitely a treasure," I gasped.

"Next one," Drake said, setting down the spear with shaky hands. It remained in its true form, and it vibrated against the large table beneath it.

Brendan picked up the sword. It was already beautiful, the blade gleaming green in the light. I touched the hilt, and Drake followed my lead, our skin touching. A spark of something new ran through me, something that wasn't the sword at all.

It was _us_. The three of us were connected on some ethereal level. I glanced in surprise at Drake, who looked as though he might feel sick. I felt a sorrow that I couldn't explain.

And then the sword crackled with power, distracting me. Thunder rumbled in the distance.

"Something's changing," Brendan said. "The land is reacting to the treasures."

"We have to keep going," Drake said, although he looked wan. He picked up the stone. When I touched it in his palm, it quickly shifted into its tablet form. Brendan stared, entranced, because he had never witnessed its transformation before. The tablet skidded through a collision of images, and at the end, it created the living picture the Watcher had shown us, making it clear that the realm was more choked up with poison than ever.

Brendan touched the mostly malignant tablet, and the floor beneath us trembled. I closed my eyes as a rush of emotions ran through me. They weren't mine, and I wondered if the stone could mimic emotions as well as the images it somehow witnessed.

The windows blew open then slammed shut, and we set the tablet down next to the sword and the spear. The weapons rolled toward the tablet as though trying to touch it.

"This is kind of terrifying," I said.

"If we keep going, we'll be the ones who have to deal with the consequences," Brendan said.

"It must be done," Drake said resignedly. "I don't think I can stop myself from touching these pieces. They want me to hold them."

"I know exactly what you mean." Brendan sighed. "No wonder they were separated. I can barely stand it."

"So it's just one more," I said. "The cup, and then we're done. The tablet will lead us to wherever we need to go. Are you both ready?"

"No," they said as one, and I laughed nervously.

"Me either."

But I lifted up the cup when the pair of kings seemed reluctant. "This cup, and then we leave to fight a god."

Brendan's fingers trembled as he extended his hand toward the cup. Drake reached out, too, and they touched the cup at the same time. It transformed into a heavy golden goblet, but the world beneath us seemed to tilt, and the three of us stumbled to one side, struggling to remain standing.

Magic swallowed up the oxygen in the room, leaving us all breathless. I tried to speak, but the sound was lost in the dizzying ripples of magic flowing outward. Unable to cope with the sensation, I let go of the cup, and the feeling ended as quickly as it had begun.

Brendan and Drake set the beautiful goblet down next to the other pieces. All four of them flew together as if through magnetism. A blast rushed away from the treasures, heating my cheeks and knocking me back.

On the floor, I shook my head dizzily. Brendan and Drake had fallen, too. A massive rumbling sounded from somewhere beneath our feet. Every piece of furniture in the room rattled.

"What is that?" I wondered aloud.

"An earthquake?" Drake offered.

" _'Ware the shaking of the earth_." Brendan unsteadily got up off the floor. "I believe that might have been a god waking up."

We held on to each other for support as we stood over the table of legendary treasures. Outside, lightning lit up an unnaturally dark sky.

"That god seems pissed," I remarked as a painting fell off the wall. We heard screams from the floors below. The event clearly wasn't limited to Drake's room.

I tried to move to the window, but Brendan held me back. "You could be knocked out. Perhaps we should separate the treasures."

"He's right," Drake said. "It's not time to keep them together."

I reached for the spear, but it stuck fast to the other treasures. "Uh, newsflash. The treasures kind of like being together." I winced as another quake shook the earth. "And I'm guessing we've just broadcast our plan to Chaos."

Brendan helped me, and as soon as we separated the treasures—with great difficulty—the worst of the trembling beneath our feet stopped, and the world seemed to right itself.

"That's screwed up," I said. "That's what's going to happen when we get to wherever we're going. We'll have to put the treasures together, and the world will feel like it's destroying itself."

"Look," Drake said. "They've gone back to normal."

All of the pieces appeared plain again, even the sword. I let my hands hover above them. "But the magic is still there. It's almost giving me motion sickness."

Drake found a bag. "We need to keep them together. In this form, they can touch."

"Except the tablet," I said. "We need that to guide us."

"I had forgotten."

He shoved the other treasures in a bag then lifted the tablet. Brendan and I touched it, and the stone turned into a tablet again. But it didn't draw lots of pictures. This time, it drew a kind of map.

"That's just outside the castle," Drake said with a frown. "Let's go see."

We ran downstairs, but as we did, the map on the tablet moved, too.

"Look." I pointed at the map. "That little dot is us. It wants us to follow the markers, but we won't know where we're going until we get there."

Drake looked up at Brendan. "We may never come back from this."

But I think we had all known that from the start.

And then a horrific scream sounded from across the fields.

"Someone must have gotten hurt when the world shook," Drake said.

The three of us tried to find the injured person, but as we crested a hill, we looked down and noticed a person shambling toward us. A familiar, _dead_ person.

"Oh, my God," I said, taking a step back. "Not him."

"What is this?" Brendan whispered. "What do you see?"

"Sadler," I said just as Drake said, "Sorcha."

We looked at each other. "What?"

"I see Sorcha," Drake said insistently.

"That's clearly Sadler," I said, wondering if he had hit his head.

"I see someone quite different," Brendan said in an odd sort of voice.

I took another step back. "Are the dead coming to life, or are we just imagining it?"

"I don't care," Drake said. "I'm so beyond done with this."

Before we could react, he ran toward the figure. I saw Sadler reach for his grandson only to vanish before the blade of Drake's sword ran him through. Drake stood there for a few moments, baffled.

"What was the point of that?" I asked. I pushed Brendan when he didn't respond. "Brendan!"

He shook his head, looking confused. "I don't..."

"Come on," I said, pulling him toward Drake. "Are you okay?"

Drake looked at me in surprise. "Up close, she was like a dream. I don't get it."

"There's more of them," Brendan said, pointing behind us.

More figures were shambling toward us, but this time, I saw Sorcha leading them, looking exactly as she had when she'd died.

"I think this is real," Drake said.

"How?" Brendan asked, as he drew his sword.

"Chaos is reanimating the dead," I said. "It's Sadler's idea all over again, but this time it's actually working."

"Banshees don't burn their dead," Drake said.

" _What_?"

"We burn most of our dead. Some, like Sorcha, ask to be buried. That's who's coming toward us. People who were buried."

"They're literally rising from their graves?" Brendan asked.

I shook my head. "Poor Sorcha."

"I'll have to kill her again," Drake said, swallowing hard. "I'll have to watch her die."

"I'll do it," Brendan said, but Drake held up his hand in protest.

"It has to be me," he said, and he set off at a run again.

Brendan signalled toward the castle then followed Drake. I couldn't move. The dead had truly risen to fight us. That was the price we were paying to fight Chaos. But would it be the only one?

Soldiers rushed past me, but I still couldn't move. I couldn't watch as Drake cut down Sorcha's form, couldn't listen to the sounds of fighting. And then I realised something and ran back to the castle.

"Send messages!" I cried out to anyone who would listen. "Send messages all over the realm. Warn them! This could happen everywhere!" The likes of Donella and MacKenzie could rise again, getting in our way to stop us. We couldn't let it hold us back this time.

# Chapter 24

The smoke from the dying embers of the pyres stung my eyes. Enough dead had arisen to delay our leaving for two days. The dead were mindless puppets, used by a god we were slowly waking, and although they fell easily, it was harder than I would have thought for experienced soldiers to strike at someone they had already watched die once. Afterward, we'd burned twitching bodies, and the Silver Court had mourned.

We'd heard little but rumours from the rest of the realm, and I had no idea how badly my own court had been affected, if at all. In my experience, bodies were burned rather than buried, but there were always exceptions, and the initial hallucinations were almost as bad as the real thing. Half the court had almost lost their minds because they imagined they saw the dead UnSeelie and Seelie queens roaming the castle. Realtín was still shaking like a leaf at the memory.

"We can't be delayed anymore," I warned Drake and Brendan, who had both been subdued by the fighting. "We need to follow the map on the tablet."

It was clear to the three of us that the tablet was trying to lure us to some mysterious location, and it had become apparent that Chaos would do _anything_ to stop us.

"But do we trust it?" Drake asked impatiently.

The ground shook for the fifth time that morning. I gave Drake a tired look. "What other choice do we have?"

"The earth itself is turning against us because we're using these legendary treasures," he insisted. "It's too risky."

"No, a pissed-off god is throwing his toys out of the pram because we're doing the right thing. Believe me, all I want to do is go home and check on my people, but we said it ourselves before we used the treasures: there's no turning back."

Brendan laid a supportive hand on my shoulder. "This journey requires the three of us, Drake. It started with us three, and it's up to us to finish it."

"My people watched me kill their already-dead queen two days ago. How can I leave them to face this again alone?"

"I haven't even heard if my children are—" My nose prickled, and I couldn't speak past the lump in my throat. I covered my face and shook my head.

"They're safe," Brendan said gently. "The human realm isn't going through this."

"The blackthorn witch made it sound like... the delays, everything that's stopped us from finishing this... maybe it's just helped Chaos get stronger. We've started this. We put the treasures together. We have no choice but to finish what we started."

"I'm in," Brendan said.

"Please, Drake," I said. "Don't fight it now. The realm needs all of us."

"I have requests to make," Drake said. "And then I'll go."

I looked at him in surprise. "Like what?"

"If Scarlet can't inherit my kingdom, then she can't inherit his either." He looked at Brendan. "Denounce her as your heir."

My instinct was to argue, not because I wanted Scarlet to have Brendan's kingdom, but because Drake's request sounded so petty.

But his expression turned desperate rather than cunning. "I'll beg you not to join your courts if I have to. It would be the end of mine."

"We're not," I said without hesitation. "We would never intentionally do anything to hurt you, Drake. It's not like we sit around thinking of ways to get rid of you. We all see the sense in separation. The realm just isn't ready for anything else right now. Maybe the next generation will do better, but we're working with what we have."

"I did a rather poor job of holding the realm together on my first try," Brendan said sheepishly. "Do you really think I haven't learned from my mistakes?"

Drake gave me a pointed look. "Sometimes I wonder." But then he shrugged. "I'm going to come. I'm just saying that it's a risk."

"It's all a risk," Brendan said. "But what else can we do in times like these?"

While the castle bustled in preparation, Drake found me outside. I had been standing on the ramparts, chilled by the sharp wind assaulting my face. Ash-coloured clouds darkened the sky in every direction.

"The superstitious ones are seeking out shelter already," he said. "All because the waves are cresting higher than usual. They think the castle might be swept into the sea."

"Is that possible?"

He shrugged. "Who knows? I once thought the dead couldn't rise again."

"Sorry about that. It must have been horrible." I shivered at the memory of seeing Sorcha's body shuffling toward us.

"You imagined you saw Sadler. That couldn't have been pleasant."

I wrapped my arms around myself. "At least he wasn't actually there. The worst part is this god being able to manipulate us so easily, making us see the people we fear most, and then following that up with the actual dead walking around." I shrugged. "I'm not sure which was scarier."

"We could face worse things before the end."

"It's a pity more gods aren't interested in backing us up."

We stood in silence, inches apart, but we were more like strangers than ever. A pang of regret formed in my chest. We should at least be friends.

"Is he well?" he asked. "My son. I hear I should thank you for saving his life."

"Actually, it was Dubh and one of the cú sídhe who protected us. So technically, your gift to us saved his life." I wanted to reach for his hand, but I didn't dare. "Anyway, Morgan's doing great now. He's so sweet," I continued when Drake didn't interrupt. "He's feeding well, fattening up a little, and Scarlet loves him. He's the new favourite in the nursery."

He gazed at me. "Does he resemble Scarlet?"

"I... he has dark hair, like her."

"His eyes then. Are they like hers?"

I shook my head. "It's hard to tell when they're babies, but his eyes are dark."

"Like his mother then." He sounded disappointed.

"She loved you and him. It's not such a bad thing that he looks like her."

"She tried to kill you. Why act as though you were friends?"

"Sorcha hated me, and I wasn't a fan of hers either, but everyone is more than one shade of grey, Drake. All of us. She died so your son would live. How can I bad-mouth her for doing something so brave and unselfish? She swallowed her pride and asked me for help. We both know what that took."

"Perhaps she was just trying to embarrass me."

"I don't think so. She truly learned to care about you. I couldn't have done that with Sadler—or MacKenzie, for that matter. And Fiadh tried to kill all of her husband's other children to protect what was her son's. Sorcha could have hurt Scarlet to benefit herself and Morgan, but she didn't."

He didn't answer.

"Look, I know you have to take Morgan home eventually, but I hope he can spend a lot of time with us. He's Scarlet's brother. It's important to me that she knows him. My brother was everything to me."

His expression softened, and he resembled the Drake I used to know. "You still miss him."

I touched the locket around my neck. "I'll never stop missing him. It broke my heart when he died. It'll always hurt." I shoved my hands in my pockets, pushing the sadness back where I had buried it. "I have a photograph of Morgan and Scarlet for you, if you want it. I thought you might like it. I was going to send it with the messages, but I wanted to give it to you myself."

"Thank you."

"I'll get it for you before we leave."

"You look happy," he said after a moment. "I know it doesn't seem like it, but I never wanted you to be unhappy."

"But I had to _choose_ to be happy, Drake. You can do this too."

"My chance is gone. I'm not sure I even deserve it anymore." He swept away before I could disagree.

Two dozen soldiers accompanied my friends and me as we set off together the following morning, all of us heavily laden down with supplies because we weren't sure what we would need. We kept an eye on the tablet, following the path marked on the ever-changing map, but we still had no idea what our final destination would be.

With every step we took, the horizon grew darker. Dark clouds whirled across the sky like chocolate swirled into milk. It was like nothing I had ever seen before.

Realtín, who had been so excited when the journey began, huddled beneath my cloak. It was cold, and the rain poured down heavier than ever before.

"Looks like Sadler had help with his rainstorms after all," Líle shouted to me over the howling winds.

Apart from a few remarks, we barely spoke as we rode, concentrating on protecting ourselves from the violent rainstorms. And when we rested, we were so exhausted that we mostly ate in silence before falling asleep. Brendan and I avoided sleeping next to one another in an unspoken attempt to protect Drake's feelings. But for some reason, that seemed to make him angrier, and the tension only grew.

After a particularly rainy day, we found shelter in a large cave high on a hill to keep us above the rapidly rising water levels. Some of my friends and I gathered at the mouth of the cave to watch the storm. We couldn't light a fire, so we chewed on cold, dried meat. We were all cold and miserable, but I was surrounded by some of my favourite people, and I had to focus on that one bright spot.

I repeatedly nudged Bekind, who sat next to me in her human form, her normally beautiful golden hair hanging in damp straggles down her back.

"What is with you?" she demanded. Of everyone, she most despised being wet.

"I just love you," I said, grinning.

"That's it." She raised her voice. "Who gave the queen faery wine?"

A ripple of giggles ran through the group.

"Our Cara has always been full of love," Anya said affectionately.

Vix let out a low snort of derision.

"I love all of you," I declared. "Yes, even you, Arlen, so you can stop rolling your eyes."

That earned me a slight twitch of his lips.

"I've just been thinking about everything," I said. "We've been through so much together. Half of you have wanted to kill me at one stage or another, yet here we are, trying to save the world together. I'm just... I'm glad you're here with me."

"We've plenty of stories to tell the children, at least," Brendan said.

The group began to reminisce about all of the things that had happened to us so far. There were so many, and yet we hadn't lost anyone to war. In fact, our group had grown. Surely that said something for us all. And then my face fell as I remembered that Sorcha had been a huge part of our adventures. She might have hated me, but she had swallowed her pride in the end to make sure her child would know love. The fae were so much more complicated than even they realised.

Brendan moved to my side, his arm dangling around my shoulder as he regaled everyone with a humorous story. Soon, most of our friends and the accompanying soldiers were laughing hard.

Drake slipped past us when the rain eased. He had been so quiet and morose that I worried about leaving him on his own. Nobody had been able to help my brother, but there was still time for Drake to let go of the things that made him miserable.

I squeezed Brendan's hand. "I'm going to check on him."

"He might need some space."

"I'm worried about him, Brendan. I think he's grieving for Sorcha but doesn't want to accept it because that'll hurt more."

"She was my friend once. I grieve for her, too, in my own way. But I have you to comfort me. What can you do for him?"

"Listen to him talk? Do you want me to stay?"

"No. He _has_ been quiet."

I left to find Drake. I knew Brendan loved Drake as much as I did. I wished Drake could find a way to accept that we could care about each other and him, too. The fae liked to tell stories about soulmates, but what happened when soulmates came in greater numbers than just a pair?

Drake wasn't on the hill, so I followed his footprints until I caught up to him. He was sitting on the rotten stump of a tree trunk, staring off into the distance.

"Hey," I said as I reached him. "You okay?"

"Why did you follow me?" He stood and moved a few steps away.

"I still care about you. I'm worried about you."

"I'm not like you. I can't surround myself with favourites and make myself feel better. I'm not like Brendan, who can just tell a funny story and cheer everyone up. I can't... I can't be like that."

"I know, but you could talk to me," I said. "I'll always be there to listen to you."

"I don't know what to say to you anymore. What the point is in talking."

"It might make you feel better. I lost my brother because he bottled up his secrets. I couldn't let that happen to you, too."

He glanced at me. "You're a good person, even now when you're more fae than human. When we met, I finally remembered what it was like to think about something other than revenge. You probably saved my life in a way." He looked away, his shoulders drooping. "I really did love you. I know you don't believe that, but I did. Sending you away broke my heart, Cara. You were all I thought about for so long."

"If we'd loved each other enough, we would have found a way to be together," I said gently. "I'm not blaming you. Our lives just took different paths."

"If I had let her, Sorcha and I would have had a happy marriage. If I had been able to let go of you, the _idea_ of you, then we might have been happy."

"And she still would have sacrificed herself to have your son," I said. "It's not your fault that she died. I'm sorry I was so angry with you."

"You were right to be frustrated. You can't understand what it's like inside my head. I think... I think Sorcha understood me better, and it's my fault that she suffered."

I took a step toward him, encouraged by his words. "So make up for it by loving Morgan the way I love Scarlet. Come to my court and see them together, and—"

He shook his head. "I don't think I can watch you and Brendan. It makes me physically sick to see you smile at him. I don't think I can ever—"

He hesitated as a strange rumbling sounded from somewhere underground.

"What was that?" I whispered. "Another earthquake?"

"I don't—"

The earth collapsed beneath him as a sinkhole suddenly formed.

I screamed and reached for him, barely managing to grab his hand. I fell on the ground, one arm around the tree stump, the other burning with the effort to hold on to Drake. The earth continued to collapse, almost taking us both down with it.

Drake's face paled as he hung over the edge. The earth had just disappeared, and there was nothing to grip but me. He tried, but the wet dirt just slid between his fingers.

"Climb up!" I cried. "I can't hold you much longer."

"It's too dangerous! If I keep pulling on the edge, it could collapse beneath you, too. I'd drag you down with me."

"Just hold on then!" I shouted as loudly as I could for help.

The stump loosened, and I let out an alarmed yelp.

"Cara," Drake said, too calmly. "You're going to fall. You have to let go of me now."

I squeezed his hand even tighter. "No!"

"Let me go before you fall!" he roared. "Just let me go!"

He tried to free himself from my grasp. Just when I felt I couldn't hold on any longer, Brendan reached down and gripped Drake's arm.

"Cara, get back," he said as he slipped in the mud. "It's too heavy with the three of us."

I scrambled backward onto sturdier ground, my heart in my throat as two of the people I loved best risked their lives at the edge of a sinkhole.

With a grunt, Brendan hauled Drake onto the surface again. They clambered away from the edges as the sinkhole grew. Brendan helped Drake up, and they both stood there, staring at each other, their limbs trembling. I was shaking, too, horrified by the close call.

"You didn't have to help me," Drake said, gazing at Brendan.

"You're my friend," Brendan said. "The brother I never had. Of course I had to help you."

I wasn't sure who moved first, but they both hugged each other, and a hard little knot in my chest loosened. "We need to get away from here," I said. "It hasn't settled yet."

I led the way, and when the two men fell behind, I waited for them.

"I know you're upset about Sorcha," Brendan was saying to Drake as they came closer. "She was loyal to me for a long time. I wish she still lived. But you have to let yourself feel it. You can't pack it away this time. It's killing you, Drake. All of this is killing you. There's no shame in feeling, no shame in hurting."

Drake's shoulders shook, as though in a silent sob.

"Mourning her isn't a weakness," Brendan said, gesturing for me to leave them alone.

With tears in my eyes, I obeyed. I had always known that Brendan cared, but with this, even Drake couldn't ignore that fact. We were a team, an extended family, and even if Drake rejected us, we would always be there for him. Satisfied with that outcome, I made my way back to the others.

"Where's Drake?" Dymphna asked.

"With Brendan. They're just... dealing with their issues."

"It's a man thing," Bran added.

I gave him a hug and settled in next to my friends. "Maybe it's a king thing."

# Chapter 25

Once Brendan and Drake had cleared the air, the atmosphere within the group relaxed even further. But the devastation to the earth continued, and we saw it firsthand as we rode past destroyed villages and dismembered bodies. I wondered if the dead had risen elsewhere and if we were seeing the aftermath of that, too.

"What if the treasures don't work?" Realtín whispered in my ear as she flitted from one horse to another.

"They will," I said firmly.

"But what if it goes wrong?"

"Then you're just going to have to get used to the human realm again."

She tutted and flew over to Grim, who was riding with Líle.

I rode on ahead, feeling the need to hurry the others. We hadn't made enough progress, and the tablet showed no signs of depositing us at our unknown destination any time soon. Brendan was in the rear, still talking to Drake, and Rumble was scolding Vix over something. Bekind had turned back into a cat and rested on his saddle.

I had the tablet and all the other treasures bar the sword. Something about holding that amount of magic in our hands was tiring, so we took turns carrying the tablet. We weren't sure what it was, but it exhausted us all the same.

I was watching the tablet, letting Dubh run as fast as he liked, when I heard an odd noise behind me and the panicked shouts of my friends. I looked back to see the others waving frantically. A massive crack had formed in the ground between us, separating me from them. I tried to reach them, but Dubh refused to jump over the fissure. He inched back as another crack sounded and the fracture widened.

I planned to ride around it, but the crack kept growing, miles in each direction. As it widened, I remembered I only had three of the treasures. Without all four, they were each worthless.

"No!" Bran shouted.

I looked up in time to see Brendan running toward the fissure on foot. He fearlessly leapt across the chasm, very nearly falling to his death but managing to establish a grip on the edge at the last moment. He climbed up, the hole in the ground still widening. Dubh rode toward him, barely slowing enough for Brendan to grab the saddle and swing himself up behind me before galloping away from the still-shifting destruction. The ground kept shaking, lightning lit up the sky, and by the time the event ended, the crevice was so wide we would never find a way back across to the others.

Our friends gestured wildly that they were going to try to find a way around.

I waved mournfully and watched them all ride parallel to the chasm as they sought a place to cross. When they were almost out of sight, I turned in the saddle to slap Brendan's arm. "What the hell did you do that for? You could have been killed!"

He unsheathed the sword of victory. "Legendary treasure number four."

"Treasure number four could have been lost forever if you'd fallen, you big show-off."

He sheathed the sword and wrapped his arms around my waist, his voice suddenly desperate. "If you think I was going to leave you out here alone, then you must be insane. I've lost you too many times, Cara Kelly. It's not happening again. It can't."

I turned to kiss him, suddenly glad he was there. I wouldn't have liked to be alone, even though Dubh was with me. "I'm glad you made the jump. I wasn't looking forward to fighting off all the zombies on my own."

"I'm glad I made it, too. I'd hate to be remembered for falling into a hole."

We rode on to put the chasm far behind us.

"You were right about this god being angry," Brendan said. "We still have a long journey ahead of us, and he's already managed to separate us once. That's it now. We're never leaving each other's sides again."

I thought about tormenting him about the logistics of that plan but decided to let it go since he had risked his life for me and the realm. "Should we wait for the others to find us?"

"The entire realm could be split in two. Let's just carry on and hope they follow. We may need all the help we can get."

We didn't dare stop to rest until it grew dark.

"Is everything okay between you and Drake now?" I asked as we ate from our meagre supplies.

He was silent for way too long.

"What is it?" I asked.

"He's... in a bad state. He's upset about so many things, and he feels he has to be strong to be a good king."

"But does he hate us?"

"He hates seeing us together. Perhaps we shouldn't... be close in front of him."

"We can't hide how we feel."

"That's the point. So perhaps in future we should see him individually rather than together. It's rubbing his face in it otherwise."

"I had to see him with his wife often enough," I said huffily.

"Don't be petty. It doesn't suit you. He wasn't happy to be married, and you know this. You and I being happy is the worst punishment he could ever have to endure. He's seen it, he's felt it. Now, can we stop reminding him?"

"Fine," I said grumpily. "If it's that important to you."

"It should be important to you, too, if you care about him."

I deflated, all of my anger leaving me. "I do care about him. He's our friend, he's Scarlet's father, and he's a part of our story. We're connected—I just wish he could see that."

"You can't force him." He laid down a blanket for us both. "Not everyone wants to be a part of what we have, Cara. You're going to have to understand that. You can't push him if he isn't ready."

"But this whole thing about Scarlet being your heir was—"

"His way of protecting himself and his son," he said. "And likely protecting the chances of his relationship with Scarlet. My affection won't harm her. He feels his might, so he backs away while I bond with her. He's already lost out on so much."

"But your court is going to be pissed that you don't have an heir. They're not going to tolerate me, of all people. They'll push you to marry again, bribe you like they did with Yvette, and then what will happen?"

He pulled me onto the blanket and rested his hand on my stomach. "Who's to say we can't give them an heir? And if you don't want that, then I'll just have to find a child who'll make an excellent leader and adopt them instead."

I laughed at his lighthearted tone. "You're an idiot."

"Maybe so. But we've been through too much to let tradition hold us back now." He lay on his back and closed his eyes. "One life-altering problem at a time is enough for me right now."

He fell silent, and I prodded him, but he had fallen asleep already. I curled up next to him, wishing I could be so self-assured.

# Chapter 26

"I feel like we've been here before," I said, looking around me in confusion.

I wasn't exactly knowledgeable about trees, but there was an atmosphere in the air that felt familiar. The trees appeared taller, older, and more vibrant than elsewhere. The worst of the taint had bypassed the place, and that in itself was unusual.

Brendan urged Dubh to stop. "That's because we have. I could have sworn we were miles out, but we're near the Keepers' village, I think. I wonder if they moved on."

"Maybe we're following a leyline," I said.

"But why? Surely it would be easier to follow a direct path instead of this backtracking nonsense."

"But leylines get used up. Maybe the map is just a route that's possible right now, but it doesn't know beforehand. It just follows the lines."

"And if there were no leylines?" He sighed. "It doesn't seem like the best use of our time."

"There must be a reason."

"Let's hope it's a good one."

I nudged Dubh with my knee, and he set off again. "I hope the others are all right."

Brendan brushed my hair out of the way to kiss the back of my neck. "They'll take care of each other. They don't need you there to remember that."

"This path's been so quiet that it makes me worry about what they're facing. I wonder if we'll pass that village again."

"You remember the place fondly."

I covered his hand with mine. I hadn't been sure of my growing feelings for Brendan then because I'd been so caught up in Drake's will-we-or-won't-we drama. So much time had been wasted, but I couldn't regret it. Some things were meant to be.

"That night we stayed in the Keepers' village was one of the best I've ever had. It was the way I always imagined the fae to be. No cruelty or pain, just... fun. They lived so simply, but well. None of the court intrigues or politics or secrets to spoil everything. It was more entertaining than any big party or ball."

"They don't celebrate every day."

"No, but they did for us, and it's a good memory."

"I'm glad," he said. "That you have good memories, even from back then."

"I remember how I felt back then," I said wistfully. "How confused everything became when you were freed from the Fade. I was so desperate to stay in the faery realm. I was terrified of losing it all, my memories of you and Drake and everyone. I thought it would be you who would take it away. But it was him. If I paid more attention, I would have realised sooner."

"The faery realm will always be yours," he said under his breath. "Never think—"

We froze as someone yelled from nearby.

"We should help," I said.

With a grunt, Brendan urged Dubh toward the sound.

"Help!" a young boy cried, bursting out from thickly knotted trees and right into our path. "Help us!"

He was too excited to do much more than point, so Brendan dismounted and sat the boy on top of Dubh with me.

"It's all right," I said soothingly.

The boy shook his head. "Help _him_."

We investigated, letting the boy lead the way. We came upon Dwyer, a tracker and one of the keepers, sitting with his back to a tree trunk as three dead Darksiders advanced on him. Dwyer looked too astonished to move, and Brendan took on the dead alone, quickly ending the confrontation.

"We need to burn the bodies," Brendan said.

"I saw my father," Dwyer said, inspecting an injury to his leg. "He wasn't real, so I thought these weren't either. What's happening to us?"

"A god is over-reacting somewhere," I said. "It's over now."

Dwyer looked up at the boy. "Take them to the village and tell somebody to come help me burn the bodies." He nodded at Brendan. "And thank you."

"Just repaying a favour you once did for us," Brendan said. "And I'll help you with the fires while she rests in the village."

Dwyer agreed, and the boy helped me find the village. By the time we arrived, his story had expanded until he was the hero surrounded by dozens of terrifying dead. I let him have it.

The village was odd. Buildings had been carved into ancient trees, and the place was circled by even larger trees that protected them from view—unless you already knew the way.

A group of women greeted us, eager to hear the boy's story. A young woman with freckles pushed her way through the crowd to greet me.

She grinned. "I knew I'd see you again someday."

"Tayla," I said, happy to see another familiar face. "You're okay."

Her face fell. "For now. Tell me you know how to stop this poison. Nothing we do is helping. It works too fast, destroying roots before they've even taken hold. We were protected for so long, but in the last few weeks, we've all realised that our home is dying as rapidly as the rest of the realm."

"We're on our way to do something about that," I said. "We just happened to come across Dwyer on the way."

"So you're staying for the night?" She sighed with relief. "It's been so miserable. I could use happy news. Come on. We'll wash and eat, and you can tell me everything."

_Everything_. Where did I even start?

The keepers of the forest had convoluted rules which meant I would spend the afternoon with Tayla and wouldn't see Brendan again until that evening when the bonfire was lit.

I wasn't sad to spend time with Tayla, but I wished I didn't have to waste time away from Brendan—just in case. It was nice to bathe in a clean pool though. Tayla and the others spent a lot of time braiding my hair like theirs. They saw the darkened veins on my arms and acted as though they hadn't, but the atmosphere drooped after that. I was a reminder that their way of life was dying.

"I'm going to fix it," I whispered to Tayla. "This isn't the end."

She smiled, but her concern was clear. "It feels as though it's too late. As though we're saying goodbye."

"You could go to the human realm."

"If we leave, it really will be the end. We won't ever leave this place."

I remembered a village of bones and wondered if those people had thought the same thing.

As the sky darkened, the bonfire burned brighter than ever, and it was time for the evening's celebration to begin. The little girls led me to the bonfire, but the lightness in their step was gone.

The village had a tradition of hosting a celebration when visitors arrived, playing sad music that acknowledged the loneliness of the stars—who were always watching. Upbeat music would then follow so the elders could choose their dance partners first—and there were no refusals—to entertain the stars.

So I was fully expecting the heart-breaking whine of the violin and the drumbeats that played a rhythm on my soul. But I hadn't expected the villagers to be so depressed that they just couldn't bring themselves to celebrate.

"The music comes from the earth." Tayla gestured to the drum snares that were partially embedded in the ground. "If the earth weeps, so should we. The stars will understand. They will watch us die and weep for _us_ when we are long-forgotten."

I wrapped my arms around my knees as a little girl pinned freshly plucked flowers into my hair. The flowers were already wilting, and the little girl's hands were stained with grey. The blight had affected everyone in the realm in ways large and small.

Brendan soon approached us, his hands in his pockets. "The elder is in no mood for dancing, and as I'm a gazillion years old..." He held out his hand. "May I have this dance, Cara Kelly?"

I grinned and took his hand. He pulled me to the bonfire and held me close.

"I'm afraid it's not quite how you remember it," he said. "This is no celebration."

"They're all so very sad. What about you? Did you burn the bodies?"

"Yes. And I'm wondering if perhaps we are the ones causing the bodies to rise—if they are following in our wake. Is this god trying to spy on us or stop us?"

I shivered at the idea of the dead watching us. "Maybe he's trying to see what we're made of."

His lips curved upward. "I think we've been holding back, personally." He ran his thumb across my lips. "You look most beautiful in places like this, Cara. With no shoes on your feet and flowers in your hair. There's no way we can fail. Not us. We've managed the impossible together too many times. These people shouldn't be so miserable."

I stopped dancing and reached up onto the tips of my toes to kiss his cheek.

"What was that for?" he asked, looking pleased.

"You and your ego boosts again." I leaned in as some more couples joined us. "Is it just me or is the music getting faster? A little less, _woe is me_?"

He forced me into a twirl, making me laugh. "Your good mood must be catching."

"Think I can make them all happy?"

He slowed to kiss my forehead. "I think you can do anything you dream of."

I wrapped my arms around him and smiled. "I'll try to be sneaky about it then." As we danced, I slowly leaked out some of the happiness I was feeling. And it was easy. Easier than anger or pain or sorrow. At some point, I had decided I was allowed to be happy, and when the darker moods touched me, they didn't survive for long. I shared my happiness with the village—just enough to ease the sadness that had shrouded their celebration.

By the time Brendan and I needed to take a break from dancing, everyone was on their feet, giving the stars the show they liked to promise them.

Brendan and I sat with a group of children who were listening to stories told by the older women. The light of the fire danced on their awed faces as they heard tales that made them shiver and laugh in turn. Once, I would have listened with them, but now I watched their hopeful expressions instead, committing them to memory in case I needed yet another reason to keep going, no matter what it cost me.

It was hard to think about loss next to a king. His fingertips ran up and down my arms, and the air crackled with more than the heat from the fire. When the stories ended, the children giggled and danced around the fire in a ring to avoid being sent to bed. The old women chased them, scolding them with smiling eyes, and soon, Brendan and I were alone, sitting in the shadows as we watched the village return to life.

"You did this." He kissed my knuckles then touched the black wedding ring on my finger. "Isn't it time you took _this_ off?"

"It doesn't remind me of Sadler," I said. "It reminds me of the day I married the Darkside and made _them_ my family. I can't let go of them, Brendan. Not even for you."

"I know. Watching you care for even those forgotten fae... I fear for how things would have turned out if you hadn't been there when I returned, Cara." His gaze turned wistful. "I fear for the fate of my soul."

"You were already different."

"Perhaps not different enough." He studied my face. "Your sadness once reminded me of Sadler's wife, and I felt as though making you smile would wipe my sins clean."

"Did it work?"

"I will always wear those sins," he said softly. "I'm not ashamed to acknowledge the wrongs I did. But making you smile did something to me that I can't even explain. You smile often enough on your own now, but I still like to be the one who earns them."

"I wish you were with me every day." Every time I let myself feel, I shed a little more fear. Not even the thought of what might come next could force me back behind the walls I'd built so long ago.

"The time we spend together will be sweeter for the absence." He sounded as though it were a promise.

"Then we should start making the most of it."

I took his hand and led him away from the bonfire and into the forest that protected the village.

"Where are we going?" His voice sounded husky in the darkness.

I stopped moving to kiss him. "Bed."

He picked me up in one slick movement. "I'm fairly certain this isn't the way."

"Shut up." I kissed him hard. "And follow me."

Grinning, he let me down, and I felt cold away from his arms. "I love it when you boss me around," he teased.

I took his hand and pulled him after me, only stopping for brief kisses beneath ancient trees that sighed as though they felt our touch themselves. Leaves lightly fell around us, swirling in the wind at our feet. I felt them, felt everything, as though we were a part of the forest itself.

I pulled away and held him still. "Every time you kiss me, I feel the entire realm is watching. Waiting for... I don't know what."

"For me to fall, perhaps." Shadows fell across his face as he studied me, his gaze as intense and heated as when he needed to hunt. "Except... last time, the land warned me, and I didn't pay attention to the signs. This time..." He glanced around.

I held my breath.

"This time, the land celebrates with me." A ghost of a smile curved his lips. "And so the girl turned the foolish king into a man."

"Don't make fun," I whispered.

"I'm not." He brought me to his lips more urgently, brushing my fringe away from my face as though it would pull him closer to me. A gust of wind enveloped us, pushing us together, and I knew what he meant. It felt as though the realm had given its blessing.

I found my way under his shirt and pinched his sides to make him jump. "We'll never get there at this rate."

"But where is there?" His smile was light-hearted, but his breathing was ragged.

I sucked his lower lip into my mouth and delighted in his reaction. "You'll see."

It took us an age, but we finally reached the stream I had washed in earlier that afternoon. There was a beautiful clearing right by it that was hit by the sun during the day, and I knew it would give us the perfect view of the stars.

"Is this..." He sounded confused. "Are those _our_ things?"

I smiled at his surprise and threw some dry kindling on the still burning embers of a fire. "I set up camp here earlier to give us space away from the others. The boy who called for help kept the fire going for me until he got distracted by the dancing." I tugged on his hand. "Sit down already."

Shaking his head, he obeyed, his eyes bright with mischief. He belonged in the forest, far away from the dullness of court. He sat on a flat rock then pulled me down in front of him and wrapped his arms around me. For a long while, we sat there in the darkness, hearing nothing but the rustling of leaves and the crackling of the fire as a new born flame licked the fresh tinder.

"Listen," he whispered. "The trees don't care that we're royals."

"I hate to break it to you, but you don't often act royal in my company."

"Hush." He nibbled my earlobe. " _You_ just don't like authority."

"But I like you." I squeezed his thighs. "I don't care if you have a crown."

He sighed and held me closer.

"I thought you wanted to be part of the celebrations."

I leaned back against his chest. "I am." I reached up to touch his cheek. "I want to be alone with you tonight."

"Except for the stars," he teased, but his grip on me had tightened. The air already hung heavy with anticipation.

I turned my body to kneel before him. "Let them watch." I kissed him, relishing the warmth of his embrace as he wrapped his arms around me, drawing me closer. His touch was firm and sure, and we moved around each other as though we had been together for centuries.

"I could glamour it all," he whispered between dropping kisses on my mouth and chin. "Make you see a beautiful bedroom with sheets made of silk."

"I don't need the lie." I had spent far too long holding on to a mistake in case giving up diminished everything I had gone through. "The truth is all I want."

"I'm glad." He ran his finger from my lips to my throat. "I tired of the glamour." He unbuttoned my shirt—holding my gaze the entire time—then slid it off my shoulders, his fingertips skimming my collarbone. Delicate kisses followed. My skin prickled as I shrugged the rest of the way out of the fabric. He traced the bumps on my skin. "You're shivering."

I laughed. "I _know_." I ran my hands through his hair and pulled him closer to me. "Now kiss me."

He held back, his eyes sparkling with humour. "I thought I enjoyed the chase, but _this_..."

I gently bit on his lip to shut him up. But still there was something making him hesitate; I felt the tension in his limbs. I remembered another night when we had been drunk on magic, when everything had been wild and confusing. When I had chosen Drake. But we weren't drunk on magic anymore.

"Brendan," I said shakily. "Are you willing?"

His breath hitched. "Always, for you."

Holding my gaze, he carried me to the blankets and gently lay me down. He leaned over me, his face inches above mine. The light from the fire hit his hair, making it look more golden than red. I eagerly helped him pull his shirt over his head, letting my hands linger on the hard muscles of his body until I knew the shape of him by heart. Laying there, so close to him, felt right in a way I hadn't anticipated.

When he kissed me, his hands constantly caressed my skin, and my heart felt close to bursting. The rest of the world had faded away, and with it, our problems. There was only us. It had always been us; I had just been too stupid to realise it.

He drifted lower, whispering words of love, and a lump in my throat formed. I shook with a silent sob that sent him back to my face. "What is it? Why do you look so sad?"

"I'm not sad, I swear. I just wish... I hadn't wasted so much time."

He brushed his nose against mine. "My soul is yours. Nothing else matters."

"I'm sorry I made you wait."

He pressed a kiss at the corner of my mouth. "The point is that I waited, is it not?"

I wriggled out from under him and flipped him onto his back to straddle him. "I'm so freaking glad you made that jump."

Grinning, he sat up and kissed me, our limbs hooking around each other as if they knew the moves better than we did. My nerve endings burned in the best way as his warm tongue explored my mouth. I dug my fingertips into his skin when he brushed his hand through my hair, sending a rush of sensations throughout my body. I wanted him badly, and he could feel it, but his eyes hadn't glazed over. It was real. All of it.

We spent the night exploring each other, undressing slowly to reveal a little more skin at a time. But there was only so long we could hold back. Soft kisses grew heated, loving touches grew eager, and the night slowly burned away as

we put on a show for the stars.

I didn't hold back anymore. I gave him everything I had. And in the heat of the moment, when my breath caught in my throat and the world stood still, I held his loving gaze and trusted that everything reflected back at me was true. Even if it all went wrong, I would always have that night—and so many other great memories with him.

We watched dawn break together, our naked limbs entangled, and my heart still racing like a hummingbird's wings. Brendan kissed my back then propped himself up on his elbow to look at me.

I tried to stretch, but I still felt wobbly. "I hate to feed your ego, but that was totally worth the wait."

He ran his fingers across the tattoo on my hip until I shivered. "Do you think the stars are pleased with us?"

I grinned. "They should be. That was years of build up right there. It's not going to be like that every time."

He stopped moving. "Challenge accepted."

Laughing, I rolled over to face him. We had a world to save, but not for a few more hours.

# Chapter 27

We travelled for days, snatching only a couple of hours of rest at a time. Occasionally we would pass a small tribe or village and be welcomed with offers of shelter and supplies. But in between, we rode on, never daring to wonder what would happen at the end of the never-ending rainbow.

The tablet kept drawing our path, marking landmarks and giving us clues about the landscape. We saw no more dead rising, but the weather grew stormier the longer we travelled. The landscape changed, and the sun stopped shining altogether. Nights lengthened until there was barely any day left, and I worried that neither of us would never find our way home again.

"Do you have any idea where we are?" I asked Brendan, barely able to keep my eyes open.

"None at all," he admitted. "But the map seems to be slowing down. I think we're almost there."

"I'm so scared," I whispered.

"We're all scared. When has that ever stopped us?"

That evening, we were forced to squeeze through a narrow path into a deep valley. I gazed upward, feeling incredibly small and insignificant. About halfway through the valley, the tablet cleared, and all of the treasures began to hum again.

"What is this place?" I asked.

"I've no idea. I have a feeling we walked off the edge of our maps a long time ago."

I squinted as something caught my eye. "There's something over there, in the earth. Something shining, I think, but I can feel it, even from here. Think it's some kind of mega powerful leyline?"

We urged Dubh on until we reached a wide expanse of power. The humming grew louder. The earth looked murkier there, and yet gleamed at the same time. It reminded me of the portals we passed through to get to the human realm, but they never led underground.

"It's a gateway," Brendan whispered.

"The blackthorn witch mentioned the gate of the gods. Any idea what that is?"

"Perhaps a portal?"

But a portal to what? "What now?"

"We go through," he said. "And hold on tight to each other."

But I remembered what the blackthorn witch had said. Only one of us would wield the treasures.

"Wait," I said, tugging his arm as he dismounted.

"What is it?"

He helped me off Dubh, and I stood there, swallowing hard, trying to figure out how to tell him without telling him. And then I decided not to tell him at all.

"I'm just so tired," I said. "And we don't know what's going to happen. It's been... I can't just walk in."

"Then I will." He took my hands. "You don't have to risk your life. You and Drake have children to worry about. I have none." He gently squeezed my fingers. "I never meant for you to take on this responsibility, Cara. Sadler was my problem, and I'm the one who should clean up his mess."

My heart warmed as I gazed up at him. "Sadler brought all of us into this. It's not just on your shoulders anymore. And if there is a risk, can't we just have one more night together first?"

He seemed about to protest, but then his gaze turned tender. He held my face in his hands then pressed a kiss to my lips. "I would love that."

We camped in the valley, keeping our distance from the portal. The power it held made me shake inside, and I didn't want to see it when I spent my last night with Brendan. I didn't know what would happen when I stepped inside the portal. I might be too late; it might be a trick. So much could go wrong for us.

Brendan built a small fire before darkness hit. I felt his gaze on me, heavy as a touch, and I settled next to him. We sat together, holding hands, until I shivered and he drew me to him. I felt his heartbeat, his breath against my cheek, and I wanted to cry. But that would waste time. I needed to savour every second.

I looked up at the lilac moon and saw stars crowded together. "Do you think the stars are still watching?"

"What else in the realm is as interesting to watch as you?" he murmured, leading me to our blanket. He whispered of dreams of the future in between loving kisses, and it was all I could do to keep the tears at bay.

"You're a good mother," he said, running his hand across my stomach. "I was half-joking before, but I want you to be the mother of my heir, Cara. There can never be anyone else."

"But what if—"

"Can't you feel it? Our souls are intertwined." He grinned. "We can't truly be separated. We've proved that."

"Setanta told me the story of Tristram and Iseult," I said.

"Ah, that explains the names of your dogs." He kissed my shoulder. "I should have known you would choose melancholy names."

"Setanta said they were soulmates. That everyone knows soulmates can't separate. No matter what, they find each other again. Do you really believe that?"

"As a youth? No. Now, very much so. There's something that connects you to me, an invisible thread that can be pulled taut but never snapped. From early on, I just knew, somehow, that we would always be a part of each other's worlds. It makes more sense now than it did then, but I always felt I knew you well, even before I truly did."

He kissed me then, and I gathered him to me. Every touch, every movement, every kiss I held tight in my mind in case it was our last.

Later that night, when he was safely asleep, I quickly dressed in silence. I grabbed the treasures and ran, sprinting toward the portal. I was a few feet away when I heard him shout my name, distraught. If I looked at his face, I would give up, I knew.

"I'm sorry!" I cried before leaping through the portal and leaving Brendan behind. It was too late to change my mind.

# Chapter 28

My stomach somersaulted as I fell through the portal and into another world. It wasn't the faery realm. At least, it didn't feel like it, but it was an extension of the magic.

I stood on a long, lonely road. A haze surrounded me, so I couldn't see far into the distance or make out what was on either side of the road. But when I looked over my shoulder, I couldn't see the portal either. There was only one way to go, and that was forward.

Every nerve in my body thrilled as I started walking, each step one closer to the end of the fae's problems. Unless I had been fooled. Unless my instincts were wrong. Unless I had left Brendan behind for nothing.

I was in my bare feet and wearing a long white dress. Just like my very first night with the fae. That wasn't a good sign. White was never a good colour for a human in the faery realm. A queen now, I scolded myself, but my hands trembled all the same.

And then the voices came, whispering to me, shouting at me, commanding me to choose, to decide. I heard the three priestesses telling me to give Brighid back her gift. They reached for me out of the haze, but I couldn't tell if they were real or not.

I covered my ears and screamed "No!" as forcefully as I could. My throat ached, but the voices of the demi-priestesses disappeared.

But other voices came, telling me to choose a sacrifice. Faces appeared, hands grabbed at me. My mother, my daughter, my love, the realm... or my soul.

I couldn't lose any of them. I couldn't. I wanted family and love and the fae, and I desperately needed to keep my soul. I had let the darkness and the power corrupt me before. I couldn't again.

The journey continued, but my feet were bleeding, the hem of my dress was frayed and dirty, and a train was beginning to form in my wake.

Ahead of me was one of Deorad's sons. The man who had killed Rat was standing on the road, staring at me, his stomach bleeding profusely. Blood slid from his mouth like tar.

I couldn't look at him. I walked around him, avoiding a touch that never came.

"You called me a free man," he said as I passed then he spat out his tongue.

MacKenzie was next, my dagger still in his heart. "Liar," he spat. "Manipulator. There's no honour in you."

Donella was next, trying in vain to stem the bleeding from her neck. "My true ancestor," she said, cackling.

I kept going. I couldn't regret either of their deaths. The alternative was just too horrible.

Sadler was there, the cruel doctor behind him, holding the mirrored staff against Sadler's back as though he were the puppet-master. Sadler's laugh sounded truly happy. "You turned into me. I chose the right wife, after all."

Reynard knelt at my feet, still bleeding from the wound I had inflicted on him. I glared at him, unable to feel any shame for his death, and he faded away.

I saw Deorad, cradling his wings in his arms, and Rat, who turned her back on me because I had failed her.

Unfamiliar faces gathered. Deaths I was responsible for. I saw fae still living, their ghostly forms curled up in pain because I had used my emotions against them.

Sorcha stood there, covered in blood, holding my gaze as I passed her. She shook her head and moved her mouth, but I couldn't hear the words.

And then I saw my human family. My dead brother stood alone, staring at me as though trying to figure me out. Or perhaps he didn't recognise what was left of the little girl he knew. My parents clung to each other, their pain clear in their eyes. The man I had called father avoided my gaze, and my mother scratched her cheeks the way she had the day she sent me away.

And I hadn't forgiven her. I'd forgiven fae who had tried to kill me, but I hadn't forgiven my own family, and that regret was a revelation.

By then, tears were running down my cheeks. From the haze came black-veined hands that almost touched me. I kept walking resolutely ahead. It didn't matter what happened to me. I had to make it to the end. I had no choice. The fae were relying on me. I was the one holding the treasures, and I was the one who had stepped through the gate. It was up to me, and I couldn't afford to fail.

The next part of the road led up a steep hill. I was exhausted. The dress grew heavier and heavier, growing with every face I passed. I ended up on my hands and knees, sweat running down my back as I crested the hill. And at the top of the hill was another land, a place that didn't seem real.

Brighid's flowers grew everywhere, interspersed with forests of the First Tree. And before me, standing proud, her hands gripping a spear, was a tall, muscular woman. _Brighid_. The name came to me at once. I had seen a painting, and it bore a resemblance to this woman, but the real goddess was indescribable. It was hard to look at her. She gleamed with power and goodness, and the land itself was fertile at her feet. I felt vile in comparison to her.

She took two steps forward, white flowers sprouting where she had stepped.

I couldn't breathe. I just stared up at her, completely overwhelmed.

"Is it really you?" I whispered. "Are you... are you Brighid?"

"Yes," she said, and every emotion was spun in her words. They were warm and scolding all at once, and I wanted to cry for no reason at all.

"You never abandoned them," I said tearfully. "You didn't leave them at all."

"I did," she said softly. "I came here to guard the way. A terrible god sleeps behind me, and he's waking up. When he awakes fully, I will be the first thing he destroys. And with me, the realm will truly die."

"But we can stop it. I have the treasures, and—"

"The treasures," she scoffed. "You have the treasures, but can you wield them? With all you have to lose? You've come a long way, Cara Kelly. A lot of humans have been led to the faery realm, but I believe you're the first to build your own kingdom."

"I didn't build it. I stole it."

"For power," she said, her voice hardening. "And have you been a good queen, Cara Kelly? Do you deserve the loyalty you've earned among the fae?"

I stared at my feet for a moment before meeting her gaze. "I've made a lot of mistakes. I know I have, but I've tried to do what's best for them."

"Do you know the path you walked? That was your judgement. Only the pure may pass me. Nobody comes this far without being judged, and I'm afraid you've been found lacking. You've driven a wedge between two kings, murdered a third, and ruled his court with an iron fist. Do you deny it?"

I hung my head. I wished I could. "No." But then I met her gaze with a fierceness of my own. "I've done what I had to do, and I think the consequences would have been worse if I hadn't interfered."

Her gaze softened. "Sadly, we cannot see the alternatives."

"Are you going to punish me?"

She came closer and lifted her spear. I flinched as she brought it down, but suddenly, the unbearable weight was gone. Brighid had cut the train of the dress away, cut me free.

"I wasn't the one who judged you," she said gently. "You judged yourself, carried your sins, and still, you made it here with all four treasures. You wore your sins well, but now you are clean again. You stand before me pure. You've earned the right to pass, but what do you plan on doing next, Cara Kelly?"

"I want to stop the god of Chaos. Is it even possible?"

"It's possible, but that does not make it easy." She took a couple of steps away from me. "I've watched you."

"And now you want me to sacrifice my daughter," I said bitterly. "Your little priestesses told me. Well, I don't accept that, and if you even try, don't imagine I won't use the four treasures on you before I reach Chaos. There's _always_ another way."

"There's always another way. But for the power to make a god sleep, a price must be paid." Her face remained expressionless. "You could sacrifice a king."

"No," I snapped. "Never."

"You killed Sadler."

"He wasn't a king. He was a crazy murderer who had been manipulated by despicable beings. I put him out of his misery."

"Perhaps. The father of your child is his descendant. Perhaps he should be the one to pay for his grandfather's crimes."

"No," I said in a shaky voice. "He might have made mistakes, too, but Drake does not deserve to die. I won't offer him up to you either."

"And Brendan?" she asked lightly. "He's escaped from the Fade twice now. His next deal with death will be his last. Isn't his time up?"

"Leave him alone," I said, terrified she would pick him because he hated her. "He's a good man and a great king. I won't let you hurt him."

"Can you truly stop me?" She raised her brows. "Of them all, I would hate to see _him_ die. He's the last of my kin, and his son could lead the fae to greatness."

"His son?" My heart threatened to stop.

Brighid smiled kindly. "I only know of possible futures. Great things will come from Brendan now that he's learned his lesson." Chairs appeared out of nowhere, and we were both suddenly sitting, facing each other. "There are more options. The parents who raised you were not good to you. You're angry with them. I can taste your displeasure from here. Who would it harm to let them be punished?"

I squeezed my eyes shut. I hated the man I called father, but not enough to kill him. "No," I said in a quiet voice.

"It would be the easiest choice."

I refused to answer. Hate had gotten hold of my heart, but I was still human. I already knew what I had to do.

"You could always seal the portals and save the human realm by letting the faery one die. If Chaos self-destructs with nowhere else to go, many lives will be saved. You could even flee with those you care about first. Without the crown, you and Brendan could be together. Your daughter would have a normal life. You would have everything you ever wanted."

"I want the fae to live," I said passionately. "I want to save them all."

"I see that you don't understand. We need power to stop Chaos."

"I don't have much of that." I shivered. There was one thing. "Can you take my... feelings?"

She cocked her head to the side. "In a way. There is some power in your emotions, but there is power in the love of any human. I believe the love you feel for those you care for is your most powerful gift. A love offering indeed. If you give up a piece of your heart, your sacrifice—and the grief you will feel—will give us the power to send him back to sleep for a time. It will hurt, but—"

"How do I kill him?"

She leaned back in her chair, the corners of her mouth lifting. "You think to kill a god?"

"If Bart was telling the truth about sealing the portals, then he was telling the truth about everything else. I know there's two ways to do this. You need a vessel or something."

"You don't understand what a vessel must do," she said. "The vessel must take the darkness of Chaos into her own body, endure suffering like no other. The vessel then uses the sword of victory on themselves to stop the sickness before it takes hold. It's the only sure way to end the darkness."

"So somebody has to die?" I asked. "Why? What is this game?"

"The game is over. I see what you are made of, and I am satisfied. Last time, there was no vessel because the intended one died before the end, but in truth, he was never willing."

"A willing sacrifice," I said. "That was always my destiny then."

She shrugged. "There are few who can be the vessel. You see, true gods don't die. They are reborn, a piece at a time, in the souls of their descendants. Only those with a piece of a true god inside them can even attempt to withstand the poison long enough to kill Chaos."

"You said Brendan was your kin," I whispered. "He was supposed to be the vessel?"

"There is no _supposed to_. You make your own choices. And while it's true that Brendan has enough of my father in his soul to make this sacrifice, there is another. Babd herself was reborn into your kin."

"You mean Donella? She's descended from a god?" I ran my hands through my hair. "She's dead. We... we killed her already. And Sadler. He said... he's dead, too."

"No," she said. "Neither of them came from us. I'm talking about your father's side of the family."

I was confused for a moment, but then realisation struck. "You mean the man who raped my mother."

"And if he hadn't, you wouldn't be standing here today, preparing to save the world. We all have our sacrifices to make. I've had to watch my world slowly die. Chaos killed those I loved. They will be born again, but he took the forms I knew. And a piece of a true god lies in your soul, as with Brendan."

"I don't understand," I said, wanting to cry. "I don't have any power. I can't kill a god because you think some distant relative had the power of a god. I don't even understand what that means! My soul is _mine_!"

"Everyone has power. I want to cry because you want to cry. If that's not power, then I don't know what is."

"You've got this wrong," I insisted. "I don't have anything to do with any gods."

"You are a true child of Ireland. The fae have forgotten what that really means, but I have not. You have ancient blood, carry the remnants of a lost god, and you _are_ capable of beating Chaos for good. But you are unlikely to survive, and the choice is always yours to make."

I sucked in a deep breath. "How do I beat him?"

"Even though you know you'll likely die?"

"I can't send him back to sleep. Not if he could return. It's too risky."

"Then you'll need the treasures," she said. "The tablet will lead your way again, but it isn't far. You'll find his body, bound to an altar, and then you will pierce his side with the spear. You will fill the cup with his tainted blood, and then you'll drink it." I must have looked alarmed, because she hurried to continue. "You need to take his immortality away, and then you can kill him with the sword. But you need to survive the taint long enough to use the sword at the right time. You may not. This could all be for nothing."

"But if I take his immortality away, will _I_ become immortal?"

"You will be... changed. Containing what is in Chaos will..." She ducked her head, but I thought I caught the sight of a tear glistening in her eyes. "Before the tainted blood can twist you into something terrible, you will turn the sword on yourself and end the blight forever. The death will destroy this place, but the realm will survive."

"I have to kill myself," I said solemnly. "After everything, that's what I have to do."

"You will suffer most horribly, but you will save the realm, and free me from my task. And when I am free, I will deal with the hypocrisies of my corrupted priestesses. Every child is indeed a gift, and gifts are not meant to be returned." She lifted me from my seat and rested her hand on the nape of my neck. "I will reward you for your selflessness, Cara Kelly, for freeing me and refusing to sacrifice that which you love instead of yourself, but you must hurry. We're almost out of time."

# Chapter 29

She kept her hand on me as I walked into the forest behind her.

"What happens if I succeed?" I asked.

"I'll be free, Chaos will die, and the realm will have a chance to heal."

I looked up at her. "And if I fail?"

"Then those you love are destined to meet again in the Nether."

"Do humans go to the Nether?"

"The Nether is just the beginning. We all end up in the same place. There are no faeries and humans—only souls. And every soul has the opportunity for peace."

"I'm going to die in here either way."

Her touch tightened. "You are not scared?"

"I don't know how I feel. But when I die, and you're free, can you watch over them for me? Everyone I care about?"

She smiled down on me then, looking more like a mother than a warrior. "I have always watched through the eyes of others, and I always will."

My entire body trembled.

"You're not alone," she said kindly.

"I don't want to die."

"All mothers want to see their children grow."

But I had to die so they could live. "Is there a risk I could survive but become evil? Like Chaos?"

She didn't answer, but I already knew what would happen if it went wrong. That great big spear in her hand would run me through.

We reached the end of the path.

"You must continue underground from here," she said. "Chaos is caught in a liminal place between living and death. He's almost free. If I could do this myself, I would, but if I took his poison into me, I would surely become just as terrible. You will make a safer vessel."

"Because I'm only human," I said wryly.

She took my hand. "You are a valiant warrior descended from the gods. You may look and act human, but your soul is fierce. Never forget that. Keep walking, Cara Kelly. May your heart stay brave."

"Did you lead me here?" I asked, faltering at the top step underground.

"You're here because of the path you chose to walk. Because your soul knew it was meant for greater things."

I winced. My soul wasn't feeling very brave just then. I had never been so scared in all my life. I had too much to live for. I had found a place in the world, finally, a place I belonged. I had found love and friendship and family, and now I had to leave it all behind. I didn't want to step down into the darkness, didn't want to face a god, but I did it anyway because there was nobody else. And if I couldn't have the things I had found, then I at least wanted them still to exist without me.

As a goddess watched, I stepped into the dark to face a waking god.

At the bottom of the steps, a dark tunnel stretched before me. I kept walking, the bag of treasures in my hands. The path forked and screams of pain sounded from every direction, but I followed the map on the tablet and soon came to a cavernous room. On a massive stone table lay what was once a man. He was tall and broad and almost entirely blackened with the taint. It drained from his eyes, curdled at the corners of his mouth, even crusted under his fingernails. And he murmured constantly, twisting against invisible bonds in his waking sleep. He breathed misery, and it engulfed me like living chains. But it couldn't suffocate me because I knew true happiness, and I wore it like a shield.

I dropped the bag and took out the rest of the treasures, laying them neatly next to one another. I wanted to vomit, but I kept moving. The treasures were all alive and awake and waiting to use their power. I hefted the spear into my hand. It had transformed as soon as I'd picked it up as though it were ready for its true purpose.

I climbed onto the stone table in the space between his outstretched legs. He was bare chested, and I saw a clear area on his hip, an area somehow untouched by the blight, a truly living piece of him. That was my target, I decided. I sank the blade into his flesh with all of my might. His murmurs grew louder, and his fingers flexed. I was running out of time.

I hopped off the table and picked up the cup, shuddering at the thought of what I had to do next. He bled black taint, not blood, and I held the cup under his wound to collect it. And when the cup was full, I lifted it to my lips and drank. His darkness smelled sweet and rotten at the same time.

I gagged on the taste, but the visions were worse. I saw his life, his evil, his horror. I inhaled the terror he had wrought on the world. As I drank, the blight touched my veins and hardened into place. I filled the cup again, whispered words coming from over my shoulder, invisible hands clawing at my skin.

Determined, I drank a second cup, this one worse than the last. I wanted to yank my own tongue out, but I kept thinking of the faces of those relying on me, and that kept me grounded long enough to drink another cup, and then another. It was the only way I could keep bringing the cup to my mouth.

When the blight wrapped around me too heavily, I thought of Brendan's touch, and it eased the pain a little.

I kept drinking, and it grew harder to pick the cup back up. The blight weighed me down, made me nauseous and sweaty. A darkness surrounded my heart, twisted in my blood. I saw the sword and wished I could use it on myself because the pain was surely killing me. I heard my brother's voice, screaming at me to stop, heard Scarlet and Lily crying, heard Brendan begging me to end it all. I kept drinking.

It felt like hours, and I could barely move with the weight of it. White and black spots appeared in my vision, and I struggled to stay on my feet. I filled the cup one more time, and then the taint stopped pouring out of Chaos.

I drank the final cup as fast as I could. My head felt light, my body almost weightless. Power crackled at my fingertips. I dropped the cup and stared at my hands, feeling magic the likes of which I had never felt before. I could use it, wield it, grow in power, and—

A hand grabbed my wrist, and I screamed with fright. But I saw the scream, like rays of power released into the world. When it stopped, I realised Chaos was sitting up, his arm covering his face as though to protect himself.

He dropped his arm, and his eyes were as white as snow, his lips a blackened red. He snarled then reached out to hit me. I ducked, striking out wildly with magic that I didn't have a clue how to use, but he avoided my attack and took hold of me again. The magic hit the ceiling, and it started to collapse. I struggled out of his grasp, but he was faster than me. He leapt on me as I dove for the treasures, and both of us crumpled to the floor.

I was terrified, and I used that against him. With one hand reaching for the sword of victory, I half-turned and laid my hand on his face. I conjured up every fear and pain I had ever felt and pushed them at him. Perhaps it was the power I stole from him, but he screamed in fear, his eyes wide with terror. I gripped the sword and scrambled out from under him. Before he could recover, I stabbed him then pulled the sword out of him again. He looked at his wound as though confused, then he withered and died as I watched.

My triumph didn't last. Without Chaos, his prison started to collapse. I threw up black vomit and suddenly felt very weak, barely able to hold the sword. If I died, the blight would die with me, and the cave would hide us both.

I trembled at the sight of my blackened skin and positioned the sword point up in front of me. I closed my eyes and thought of the people I loved. I burned from the inside out, and I knew I would die a good death, with the memories of my loved ones behind my eyes, and the pretence of Brendan's taste on my lips. I would make them all safe. Smiling, I fell on the blade. Strangely, the back of my neck seared with a heat that scorched hotter than the bite of the sword, fierier than the burn inside my lungs and heart. The ceiling began to fall, and as black liquid poured from my wound, I closed my eyes for good.

# Chapter 30

I was flying, and the scent of flowers filled the air. The light made it too hard to open my eyes, and I couldn't remember anything of what had gone before.

"What did you do to her?" a man asked. He sounded like Brendan, but wrong somehow, as though he had been broken and put back together.

"I gave her a fighting chance," a woman replied. _Brighid_ , a voice in my head said, but I couldn't recall why that was important. "I've done what I can with the wound and her soul. I owed her a favour in this life and another, but I can do no more. Her survival may depend on how much she wants to live." Her voice shifted into a more commanding tone. "If Cara Kelly cleanses this world, she will see her children grow."

"Please wake up!"

I blinked my eyes open. The cavern was gone, Chaos was gone, Brighid was gone, the portal was gone. I was in Brendan's arms in the middle of nowhere, and tears were streaming down his cheeks.

I tried to say something, but I turned my head to vomit black taint instead. It was real. It was in me, and it was real.

"Cara, Cara, speak to me."

I looked at Brendan, still trying to figure out what had happened. "I'm supposed to be dead. Did I fail?"

" _No_!" His eyes were bright green, glistening with tears. I wanted to comfort him, but I didn't know how. I felt... dead inside. "You're alive. I tried to get to you. Why did you go without me? I could have taken this pain in your stead."

"I'm not in pain."

"You were screaming," he whispered. "I heard you screaming, and I couldn't do anything to help you."

"Only one." I squeezed my eyes shut as I suddenly remembered the pain. "Only one could go in."

"Then it should have been me. Brighid brought you to me, but then she vanished."

"I saw her," I said. "She spoke to me, told me things. She said she'd reward me, and maybe that's what she meant. I was dying. I felt it. I _was_ dying. I was meant to die. That was the point."

"You're alive," he said shakily, taking me into his arms. "You're here, and you'll see your children grow."

"I killed him." I blinked. My vision had gone black. I wiped my eyes and looked at my hand. They were streaked with black from my eyes, and my veins were thick with black taint. It was just like the mirror. I had become the very thing I'd dreaded. I had sacrificed, after all.

I leapt out of his arms and moved away from him, hiding my face. I felt my neck, the hardened veins, and let out a sob.

He touched my shoulder, but I recoiled. "Don't look at me."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm disgusting. I'm the blight. I drank his power, and now it's in me. I'm everything we fear. I was supposed to die. Why didn't she just let me die?"

"No." He made me look at him, his gaze determined and strong. I couldn't look away. "Stop this."

"Can't you see it?" I whispered hopefully.

He held up my hand and traced a blackened vein. "I don't care about that, not any of it. You look a little different. So what? You're still Cara. You still have the same soul."

"This is my punishment for being bad," I said in a small voice. "This is what I get for not doing things right, for making a mess of everything."

"A _mess_? You've saved the realm. The earthquakes have stopped, Cara. The storms have stopped. The portal is gone. The treasures are gone. It's just you and me and the land. Look around you. Really look. There's no blight here. There was before I found you. You're doing it, Cara. _You're_ cleansing the realm."

I stared at him in confusion. What the hell had happened? "I... I don't understand."

"Understand that I love you," he said urgently. "Promise me that you won't leave me again. I don't care about the courts, Cara. I care about us."

"But we can't—"

"We can find a way to work around it," he said impatiently. "We'll build a castle between our courts, and we'll live there. Or we'll make a home in the human realm. We can do everything. We have time. You're here, and the blight is over. You saved us. I _love_ you."

"How can you love me like this?" I whispered. "I look like a monster."

He licked his fingers and rubbed at my wrist. " _Look_."

"It's... the taint." I shivered. "It's awful."

"No, look properly." He held my arm in the air, and in the sunlight, the hint of green glistened through the darkness. "Look at what you really are."

He kissed me, kissed the taint in me, and I started to cry. The tears were black as soot, which only made me cry more. And Brendan's mouth was black.

"I can't do this," I said. "I can't ruin you. I have to... I have to hide somewhere. Keep away from Scarlet, and—"

"Does Scarlet care about Rumble's scars? Or Setanta's disability? Or Lily's weakness from the taint?" He shook me. "We love you. We don't care what package you come in. Have you never listened to a word I've said to you? You are so much more than this. Don't let it hurt you."

"You're supposed to have a son who will do great things. Brighid told me. I can't be the one to take that from you."

"I don't care about any of that!"

I hiccupped. "But you will."

He held my chin and forced me to look at him. "Brendan Rossa Aden."

" _What_?"

"That's my true name," he said. "You own it now. I know yours, and you know mine. We're equal. Bonded. You could use it to send me away, but I'm asking you not to. I'm asking you to let me see you, to allow me to be a part of your life. If I didn't want this, I could easily walk away, but I don't care about the taint. You are... _everything_ , Cara."

I wrapped my arms around his neck then, and he gathered me to him, murmuring comforting things in my ear. "I love you. Forget everything else."

"I'm scared of myself."

"I'm with you," he said. "How many times have I told you there's nothing we can't achieve together? This isn't an end, Cara Kelly. This is our beginning."

We sat like that for a while until I gathered myself. "I told you that you were getting sappy."

He laughed at me. "There's my girl."

I still found it hard to meet his eyes. "I need to clean up. I feel disgusting."

"There's a stream," he said. "Can you walk?"

I couldn't. He helped me. The water was grey when I stepped in, but as I moved through it, my veins appeared to pull the murkiness out of the water and into me. That only made me cry again.

"You'll feel much better," he said, cleaning me when I made no effort to do it myself.

"What am I?" My bare arms and legs were covered in a pattern of darkness, like spider webbing on my skin. But that gleaming green that marked me as fae shone there, too. "What did she do to me?"

"Tell me what she said to you."

"She said that gods are reborn, that pieces of them are attached to the souls of people like you and I. We can be vessels, so I agreed, and she told me what to do." I dry retched as I remembered. "I had to use the spear, then I had to drink his blood from the cup until he became mortal again. The sword finished him off, and then I had to use it on myself."

"Did she say you had to die? Maybe it was a figurative death."

"I... I don't know. I can't remember the exact words. She said the blight corrupts people. That's why she couldn't do it. She was guarding him. All this time, she's been guarding him. And now he's gone. So why am I alive? I should be dead." I looked at him closely, but nothing in his eyes made me feel less than. "Can you glamour me?"

"You don't need to glamour yourself in front of me." He moved my hair away from my neck to wash it then gasped.

My stomach turned. "What is it now?"

"A brand. You have a true queen's brand on your neck, Cara."

I felt the back of my neck. It burned under my touch. "I don't understand."

"You're not regent. You're a true faery queen. Nobody can deny it now."

I was too tired to understand the significance.

"We should go," he said.

"Where are we going?" I asked, exhausted.

"Home. We're finally going home for good."

Brendan dismounted at the gate of the Dark Court then lifted me into his arms. I had been drifting in and out of consciousness the entire journey home, barely able to do anything for most of it except throw up black vomit.

I squeezed my eyes shut as he carried me toward the doors, sensing the weight of my Darksiders' gazes on my skin.

"Look at them," he whispered. "Look, Cara."

I opened my eyes and watched the members of my court kneel in respect as I passed them.

"Let me walk," I said, ashamed of my self-pity. Too many people in my court had been afflicted by the poison in the earth for me to show disgust in it now.

He set me on my feet but wrapped his arm around me in support. I walked slowly, my head high, and I heard gasps as I passed my people.

"Look at your feet," Brendan said in awe.

I looked down. Everywhere I walked, the taint lifted from the earth and came into my body. I felt it, grew heavy with it, but still I walked. The taint was disappearing from the land because of me. Was that what a vessel was really meant to do? Absorb and contain the sickness? But where would that leave me?

At the door, Orlaith held Scarlet and Lily in her arms. I hesitated, but Brendan urged me on. I came face-to-face with my daughters, who didn't bat an eyelid at my appearance. And why would they? I had taught Scarlet to behave otherwise, and Lily was too young to care. And as they reached for me, excitement clear in their eyes, I felt something inside me relax. I was truly home. I touched Lily's hand, too tired to hold her, and I felt the taint within her come to me instead. I looked into her eyes, and I knew I could never regret the sacrifice I had made.

# Chapter 31

I signed my name at the bottom of a page filled with beautiful script, resisting the urge to rub the still-burning brand on the back of my neck. Fae came from everywhere to see me, the living embodiment of Chaos and a permanent reminder of past mistakes, with the only goddess-given brand in the realm.

The fae who had gathered in the great hall of the Chaos Court in order to witness history being made all clapped politely as I passed one treaty to Brendan and took the next from Drake. Drake mostly couldn't look me in the eye anymore, but when he did, I saw pity in those violet depths. He thought me unfortunate, a casualty of the machinations of the fae. Maybe I was, but I had thrown myself in with them every step of the way.

I wasn't sure if my appearance was a punishment, or if I had lost a part of my humanity when I'd conquered Chaos. After a lot of thought, I had come to the conclusion that a vessel was supposed to lie under the earth and cleanse it, but Brighid had given me time to see my daughters grow to adulthood.

All I knew was that the sickness in my veins wasn't killing me, or those around me, and it no longer accidentally came to life when I grew angry. The brand was stronger than that. My reward from Brighid could have been power over the darkness inside me, or I may have misunderstood our entire conversation.

I did know that I no longer cared. It had been months since Chaos had died, and everything had changed already. The weather had begun to regulate itself—the earthquakes and storms ended almost immediately—the landslides and sinkholes had subsided, the River Garbh was almost completely clean, and even the blackthorns were said to be thriving again.

I had visited the Miacha—who couldn't help me look any better—and while most of the Darksiders they had been tending had died, I hadn't been too late for all of them. Sadler had tried to live on by taking what was theirs using the darkness of the taint, but at least a couple had survived the process.

Fae had begun to flock to forgotten grottos to praise Brighid, and rumours of a rapidly growing crow-worshipping sect in the southwest had sprung up everywhere. Some whispered that _I_ was a goddess sent to test and save the fae—but I laughed those particular rumours off. The black, glistening brand on my skin was more than a title. I had real power at my fingertips—power I was too scared to use in case the taint warped it. I no longer dreamt of things I didn't understand, but sometimes I thought I heard the singing of the treasures again. They hadn't been seen since I'd killed Chaos, and I wondered where they had gone and if Brighid had dealt with her priestesses.

Brendan had taught me to glamour my appearance on the condition that I only use it in the human realm. We were slowly figuring out a way to be together, to give the children a normal life, and that appeared to be possible only in the neutrality of the human realm. The treaties we were signing were pacts of peace among all three courts, as well as agreements to protect the human realm. It would no longer be acceptable for fae to use tricks and cruelty to harm unwilling humans.

The sickening children in my court had already begun to improve, and someday those who were forced to live in the human realm would come home to a cleaner, safe realm. Brendan had no heir, but he refused to discuss it with anyone. His court had eased off the pressure for a time, more consumed with fixing the damage that had been done to his territory. Many tribes were still roaming, looking for new places to settle, and all three of us had agreed to help them. Bas and Jackie, amongst others, travelled in search of unhappy nomads, supplies in hand to help them find suitable new homes.

Bekind and Vix continued to train our spies in case a new enemy came to the fore. Anya had taken responsibility for many orphaned faery children, along with other daughters of Brighid. Líle, on the other hand, was on a mission to restore the original grottos around the realm. Grim and Realtín, along with my twin emissaries, were about to set off on an important journey that would help Levin repair faery history. Dymphna had returned to the Silver Court to be Drake's official bodyguard. Polly had adopted Vanys's child and would soon leave to set up home elsewhere. Almost everyone I knew was starting a new journey of their own. I glanced at Brendan who winked at me. Including us.

We finished signing all of the treaties and stood to shake hands. So much had improved, but we still had more to achieve. This was just the first step.

Brendan smiled warmly at me, while Drake's handshake was brief and limp. That didn't matter anymore. It was Brendan's hand I sought, his side next to which I wanted to stand. He saw the true me, as he always had, and he loved me even when it was difficult. But more importantly, he had taught me to value myself. He liked to joke that I had saved his soul, but he had saved mine, too.

On my bad days, I looked in the mirror and saw a monster staring back, but Brendan reminded me that there was more to me than that. I was mother and queen, friend and hero, human and fae, and I had never given up. The faery realm had once been spoiled, but we—all of us, I thought as I met the gazes of my many friends—had managed to save it. And I remembered the girl I had once been and knew that the fae had saved me, too.

# Afterword

If you're reading this, then you've probably made it through the entire series. (And I salute you!) I want to thank you for sticking with me (and Cara). These fae are particularly close to my heart, and I don't regret the sleepless nights and occasional tears I put into them—no matter how much I complained at the time (hint: an awful lot).

The Chaos series is over, and while I can't see Cara leading a new series, there are plenty of other characters with stories of their own that I'd like to tell someday, so feel free to nudge me with your favourites.

Thank you again for reading. A book is nothing without readers, and I'm always grateful for the support!

~Claire

# About the Author

Thanks so much for reading Cara's story so far. The journey continues with the 4th book in the series, Usurper, but for better value, try the Chaos Volume 2 box set which includes the bonus novella, Kings.

For more information, check out Claire Farrell's blog or email the author. Sign up to be notified of new releases or like the Facebook page for more regular updates. Click here for an updated series reading order.

Contact Me:

  *     @doingitwritenow
  *     clairefarrellauthor

www.clairefarrellauthor.com

claire_farrell@live.ie

# Books by Claire Farrell:

**C haos Series:**

One Night with the Fae (Companion Prequel)

Soul (Chaos #1)

Fade (Chaos #2)

Queen (Chaos #3)

Usurper (Chaos #4)

Blight (Chaos #5)

Kings (Chaos #5.5)

Sacrifice (Chaos #6)

* * *

**A va Delaney Series (Completed):**

Thirst (Ava Delaney #1)

Taunt (Ava Delaney #2)

Tempt (Ava Delaney #3)

Taken (Ava Delaney #4)

Taste (Ava Delaney #5)

Traitor (Ava Delaney #6)

Awakening (Ava Delaney Volume I – Books 1-3)

Uprising (Ava Delaney Volume II – Books 4-6)

* * *

**L ost Souls Series:**

Tainted (Ava Delaney: Lost Souls #1)

Tethers (Ava Delaney: Lost Souls #2)

Tithes (Ava Delaney: Lost Souls #3)

Ava Delaney: Lost Souls - Volume 1

* * *

**V BI Series:**

Demon Dog (VBI #1)

* * *

**C ursed Series (Completed):**

Verity (Cursed #1)

Clarity (Cursed #2)

Adversity (Cursed #2.5)

Purity (Cursed #3)

Cursed Omnibus (Entire Cursed Series)

* * *

**S take You Series (Completed):**

Stake You (Stake You #1)

Make You (Stake You #2)

Break You (Stake You #3)

* * *

**S hort Story Collections:**

Sixty Seconds

A Little Girl in my Room

* * *

**O ther:**

Death is a Gift (A standalone banshee novel)

Zombie Moon Rising (A Peter Brannigan Novella)

Ghost Moon Rising (A Peter Brannigan Novella)

Crucible (A Phoenix Novella)

Bind (An Esther Novella)

Relativity (A Lorcan & Lucia Novella)
