Hello! This is Anwar Maqsood, welcoming you to Loose Talk.
The Loose Talk guest I have today is, Harmonium Nawaz.
Listen... Hello.
Hi!
Don't portray this in a political light.
Don't give it a political reference. 
Just say that I'm a harmonium player.
Someone who plays Shehnai is called a shehnai player, a sitar player is likewise called a sitar player.
You play a harmoinium and I reffered to you as that, harmoinium nawaz, the harmonium player.
Where is a political reference here?
What am I playing?
Harmoinium.
So yes, call me the harmonium player.
Don't give it a political reference.
Alright.
Harmonium Nawaz, just say something. 
I'll sing something.
Although I have never said such a thing, but I..
this harmonium.. I feel, as if your,
teeth, are just in rhythm as your harmonium. I really like them.
People have complimented them earlier too.
I get happy about this. I do.
The third black is missing here.
I have ordered that to be made.
Did you call me here to make fun of me or interview me?
Alright, do you like playing the harmonium?
What?
Do you like playing the harmonium?
You wretched man! Forgive me.
I get carried away when I'm angry. Of course I like playing the harmonium since I'm playing it.
But I have some other likes too.
What other likes do you have?
Next question please.
Why are you playing the harmonium?
Why are you playing the harmonium?
I'm making a tune.
What tune are you making? Which one?
I'm making a tune but..
I can't make one.
Why?
I cannot make a tune because.. I don't know how to play the harmonium.
I earn through this, so I won't lie. I don't know how to play the harmonium.
When you don't know how to play the harmonium, then why are you playing it?
I am playing this harmonium because my father, my dad that is, left this harmonium to me when he died.
Did your father played the harmonium?
No.
He ate the harmonium! You wretched man!
Mind your language.
Sorry. I get carried away when I'm angry.
You're a weird man. Of course my dad played the harmonium.
Where?
Where did he play?
Where did my father play the harmonium?
He played behind someone.
Behind who?
Behind a camel!
You wretched man! When he played the harmonium, forgive me I get carried away in anger.
Of course when he played the harmonium, it will be behind someone. He played behind a woman.
Did the woman sing? Did she sing?
No.
She was a newscaster.
She was a newscaster.
What?
You wretched man!
Mind your language.
Forgive me. I get carried away when I'm angry.
Of course, when my dad played the harmonium behind a woman, it means, she sang.
She sang thumri and ghazals.
Was she famous? Was she famous?
No. She wasn't much famous.
She was famous but for some other things.
Actually, the government of Pakistan, didn't award her with a medal to praise her singing.
But in fact a few people gave her a medal for the work she did.
And Yaseen told me, that your name was amongst those people.
Don't utter nonsense.
So I said,
when your name is amongst them so I came here. Otherwise I had nothing to do here.
You're talking nonsense.
You talk politics.
Just answer the question I ask you and don't believe the rumors you hear.
Alright.
I don't know that woman.
So its a rumor when it comes to you.
So you're making a tune these days?
Yes. I'm making a tune for a national song.
I'm making a tune for a national song but I cannot get it.
Who wrote this national song?
Who wrote this national song?
This song has been written by Tohmat Muradabadi.
Tohmat Muradabadi?
Who is he? Is he a poet?
He's the president of Russia!
The Russian president, Tohmat Muradabadi.
What are you saying?
You wretched man!
Of course when a man is writing poetry, he must be a poet.
Forgive what I say when angry.
Mind your language.
He's a poet.
He's a poet.
First we call you people in our program. But the language you people use..
No. The language,
A person shouldn't be a hypocrite. 
He should be what he is.
You people are liar. I've seen you in real life. Your foul language. We're like this. What we are, we are.
What are the lyrics of your song?
That's what the poet is not telling me.
That poet isn't telling me this. He has taken his full payment. I've paid him 170 rupees.
170 rupees for the song?
Yes. I told him to give me the lyrics, but he said no. He wants the tune first.
Now I cannot get the tune. I've been trying since morning.
I've been trying to do it. Here and there, every where. I've tried everything in my might but it just doesn't come.
Lets listen to what you've created so far.
I don't know how to play the harmonium. I'm learning. You'll see I'll learn.
Thank you. That's enough.
This is..
Do one thing,
It starts from here.
The music will play first then it'll come next.
Listen to me. Listen.
I want the lyrics.
He isn't giving me the lyrics. I get the tune but then lose it.
Alright.
Just forget the harmonium for a while.
Alright.
Forget that song.
Alright.
Lets talk about something else.
Something else. The woman that I mentioned. She had a daughter. Where is she nowadays?
Are you in your senses? What are you asking me!
Then ask me the questions you know the answer to!!
You wretched man! Forgive me. I get carried away when angry.
You said lets talk about something else so I asked about her daughter. Tell me, where is she.
I don't know her or her daughter.
This will make me complete my tune.
We're still in conversation.
The tune of the national anthem. This will come first.
Now I just want the lyrics. He isn't telling me.
We'll be back after the break.
The break is over now.
You still haven't told me what you do.
You wretched...
Mind your language!
Mind my language?
Yes.
I think I should tear off the drums of minding myself and put them in this harmonium.
Mind myself?
Have you seen the condition of our country and yet you're asking me to mind my language?
Whatever you're saying is correct to an extent.
But tell me, is there any country that is in a good condition?
Tell me the name of one country where the situation is good!
Islamabad!
Islamabad isn't a country. Its the capital city of Pakistan.
We neither have food, or clothes nor a house and you want me to mind my language?
A lot of people don't have these things and yet they don't let go of their manners.
Which party did you vote for?
Who did you vote for?
Muslim League K.
Muslim League K? Which party is it?
Muslim League K doesn't exist. That's why I voted for it.
Please keep it aside.
Is my harmonium troubling you?
No.
I have no problem. I mean,
this is a new government and they're making some decisions.
And things will get cheaper. Situations will change.
They're making decisions?
Yes.
They're making decisions?
Sitting in foreign countries, eating what they please and they're making decisions.
They wear expensive clothes, have 8 houses everywhere. They have musical programs at their homes,
and for a poor person, the bread has become expensive!
The government is new and surrounded by problems.
Don't play the harmonium. Don't play the harmonium. Don't play it.
And the way they've played the harmonium of this country?
You don't say anything to them, but you complain when I play the harmonium.
I have no objections but didn't you yourself say you don't know how to play it.
You said yourself that you don't know how to play the harmonium.
Does this government know how to play the harmonium?
Do they? They don't and yet they're playing it.
Its the public's selection in power.
How many times?
Be careful. Be careful.
What happened?
I'm crying.
Why?
I haven't eaten meat since two months.
I haven't eaten meat since two months.
Since two months?
But its good for health.
You tell me, we cannot buy bread, no rice, no flour. And yet they tell us that this country is developing?
What sort of development is this?
You look like Kamran Akmal.
The cricket player. Tell me do you have a wife and children?
Does Kamran Akmal play the harmonium too?
No.
Do you have wife and children?
I?
I have two wives and 8 children.
Do you see your earning and your deeds?
What do my deeds have to do with my marriages?
Two wives?
I didn't even need a single wife.
But what can I do, the two wives, with their 8 children,
They're very ill-mannered.
They have hit me with this harmonium so many times.
See I have got this repaired after paying, so many times.
Once, my 8th child, just destroyed me, I mean my harmonium.
The conversation is on.. You people..
Please shut this down. Please.
The second break is over.
The second break is over?
You have 8 children and two wives.
Yes. Actually...
I don't know how you fulfill the needs of 8 children and two wives in such expensive times.
Don't try to be over smart.
My first wife was selected for me by my father.
It failed.
It failed. You have three children from your first marriage.
A marriage is an exam and my wife failed that exam.
I was forced to appear for a supplementary.
So you left her?
How could I leave her?
I don't have money to buy a drawstring, how could I have paid her off?
You don't have money to buy a drawstring and yet you married twice?
Tell me one thing, why have you now focused my wives rather than inflation?
I mean, a person should only spend as much as he can afford.
When I spend, I can make room for a third one too. I am thinking about it now.
Why did you come to my show?
What?
Why did you come to my show?
I heard that whoever comes to your show, becomes a hit?
What?
I heard whoever comes to your show becomes a hit, so I came here.
You don't even know how to play a harmonium.
Remember that we can educate ourselves and learn to play harmonium regardless of age.
I am worried about your eight children.
What?
I'm worried about your eight children.
You don't have to worry about them.
 I am there to worry for them.
You worry about me.
Will you work? Do a job?
What sort?
Any job. Even a laborer earns 6000 rupees now.
No. I cannot pick up weight.
I cannot pick up any weight. I can just wake my wife up when she's sleeping.
By the way, if an MD of any organization isn't working well, can you get me in his place?
I'm serious and you're joking.
Do you want to work?
Do you know how to drive a car?
A car?
No. I just know how to use my hand. 
But if you're actually serious,
then you can get me some work. Maybe I can be the male model in Sindhi media.
What?
Get me the role of a male model in Sindhi songs.
In fact, I'll give you a little bit of that.
In fact I'll give you a demo. Can you be Marvi for some time. A girl?
Are you crazy?
No. Think of yourself as beautiful, once.
Think as if you're a beautiful woman.
Have you lost your mind?
Yes I know I've lost my mind. But humor me. 
Take your glasses off.
Take your glasses off.
What do you call glasses? Take these glasses off.
What are you thinking? Glasses are glasses, just take them off.
Now, I'm started to sing and you have to be the female model.
I cannot.
I beg you. It'll be fun.
What should I do?
You just act. I'll sing and come close to you.
Amazing. Great. Keep it up. 
Hide the face.
God forgive me.
 You look hideous. Let it be.
You look hideous. You spoiled my mood.
Alright people...
How did you do this? Do it again. Once.
Its enough.
You look hideous. Like a dacoit.
That's all for today. There are people like him in this country.. Good bye.
