Crazy. Messy.
Wild. Timid. Scared. Unsure.
Doubtful. Idealistic. Passionate. Dumb.
Inexperienced. Young. Free.
How would you describe your 20's?
Some of us may remember their 20's
as full of fond memories,
while some may choose to look away,
cringing at the choices
they made. Although we had different
experiences,
whether we admitted or not, we all have
that share of regrets from our younger
years
that we all wish to erase from our
memories; and if we could,
turn back time to correct. How many times
did those horrid memories
make a flashback in our heads and make
us wish for earth
to swallow us whole? Did you also rehearse in
your mind what could have been the
perfect scenario
instead of those regrettable events? If
only there is someone who could have
told us to make better choices.
On the other hand, if we received a
warning, if only did we listen.
Is our 20's a time and place for our
mistakes,
regrets, and our "shoulda, woulda, coulda's?"
If you could magically talk to your
younger self, what advice would you give?
Everyone, it's me again, MissJoe Abuda
and welcome back to my YouTube channel.
I believe that mistakes are as valuable
as
the words of wisdom from people ahead of
us for there are things in life
that we can only learn through personal
experience. Before writing this blog,
I surveyed my Facebook friends. I asked
them
what would they say to their 20's self.
It became a fun activity.
A lot were thankful because they were
able to reflect on their younger years.
Among the several insightful answers
from my friends,
I made a list from their suggestions
that resonates with my personal
experience.
What are the things you should say to
your 20's self?
You are enough. We all have our share of
insecurities
that will always be parts of ourselves
that make us anxious.
Whether it is physical, a characteristic,
a skill, or a talent,
we all have that same issue about
ourselves that we wish we are better.
Stop comparing yourself to other people
because life
is not a race or a competition. The only
person that matters in your life
is you. It all begins with knowing who
you are
and being happy about yourself. Embrace
all your flaws and be grateful for all
the things that you have
because no one is better than someone. We
are just unique expressions of
life. As long as you measure yourself by
the accomplishments of
others, you will never be enough. The love
and happiness that you are looking for
are within you.
Learn to love yourself first and stop
chasing people.
When you are in love with yourself
enough, people will also fall in love
with you.
Take care of yourself. If there is one
thing that you will take away from this
blog,
this is it -- this is the one. Before you
start investing in other things,
invest first on your body. Part of loving
yourself is taking care of the only body
you have.
Taking care of yourself will save you
lots of money in the future.
Drink lots of water, moisturize, always
wear sunscreen,
exercise, and the most important of all,
learn to meditate. Although fast food is
tempting, always
choose to eat real food. Brush your teeth
properly,
do not forget to floss, and visit your
dentist twice a year.
Do not wait until you feel pain and find
out you have already accumulated
too many problems on your teeth. A
beautiful smile
can take you places, so really take care
of your pearly whites.
Spend wisely. Invest your money.
I know the thrill of finally earning
your own money
and spending your hard-earn cash. It is
so easy to spend with the thinking that
you deserve
all the shopping spree because you
worked hard for it.
Before you get too excited, get to know
your relationship with
money first. Yes, there is such a thing as
a "relationship" with money.
Your attitude towards money dictates how
you earn,
save, and spend it. You may not realize
that you have a fear of money,
something that you might have learned
from your parents or the environment
where you grew up. How many times did you
hear, "it is so hard to earn money?"
If you were programmed by your
surroundings to fear finances,
it is time to fix your attitude towards
it first. There is nothing to be feared
about money.
We all use it to enjoy life. The first
thing you need to learn
as soon as you start earning is how to
budget.
Before spending, make sure you allot
first towards your savings.
Invest -- do it now while time is on your
side.
Do not go by living on an "enjoy now, plan
later" attitude.
Instead, plan your finances so you can
truly enjoy it.
While you still have the energy, it is
okay to do multiple jobs
while you can. Time and energy are on
your side.
Make the most out of them. Collect as
many experiences as you can
so that by the time you go higher in
rank at work or want to start your own
business,
you are ready and wise. Continue your
passion.
Remember what you love to do when you
were younger? Did you have supportive
parents
or did they ask you to focus on your
studies instead?
Are you able to pursue your passion or
you had your heart broken because
someone told you you were not good
enough?
Your 20's is the best time to go back to
doing what you love,
to rekindle the fire, and to continue
what you are passionate about
regardless of what others might say. If
you spent your teens
following what others want for you, now
is the time to do
things for your sake, and to do them with
relentless passion.
Some jobs pay well but they can be soul
consuming.
On the other hand, you might not be able
to monetize your passion.
Do not get caught up believing that you
will never be able to balance
work with what you love doing. Finding
that perfect balance will never be easy
but you will get there. It is better than
wasting away
years on doing something that you hate
that will leave you soulless.
Read. Invest on yourself. Keep learning.
Having your car or house sounds fitting.
Owning your first high-end designer bag
or shoes
will make you look more accomplished or
sophisticated.
Sure, you can buy them. But in the long
run,
are they worth it? If you check their
value over time
versus your capability to afford, are
they worth your investment?
Your value can never be measured by the
material things that you can buy
but by the number of experiences and
knowledge
that you collect. All the nice things in
this world can wait.
If there is one thing worth investing,
that is your self-improvement.
Read more books. Never stop learning.
Acquire as much knowledge as you can.
Make self-improvement, not just in skill
but in character, your number one
priority. This way,
whatever might happen or whatever life
may take you,
you will always be of high value. Stop
trying to impress other people. When you
go out into the world and meet new
people,
you will discover that there is a social
ladder that most people try hard to
climb.
Although the sad reality is that there
are things in life that you will achieve
easier with the right connections, this
should not be your objective to succeed.
If you follow the habit of seeking other
people's approval,
you will eventually lose who you are.
Learn when to say
no. There will be occasions when we find
ourselves
trying to please others at the risk of
doing things
that we do not like. Do not be too quick
on arriving at decisions
or answers to please others. Listen to
your instinct
and know when to agree or disagree. There
are social protocols that you must
follow
but that does not mean you have to
pretend to be someone you are not.
If you change to please others, you are
only creating an artificial image of
yourself.
There is a saying that goes, "Those who
mind
don't matter, and those who matter don't
mind."
Evolve to a better version of yourself, not
to an
image or likeness of somebody else. Don't
waste your time on the wrong people.
All of us desire true happiness but
going through pain is necessary for us
to grow.
Falling in love and experiencing
heartbreaks are all part of life's
journey.
We can read different life-lessons about
love and relationships
but only going through various
experiences can we truly learn
valuable lessons. Understand that people,
including
friends and lovers, come and go. Learn to
see red flags early on
and know when it is time to let someone
go.
When you get yourself heartbroken, it is
natural to be sad or cry,
but do not take too long to the point
that you no longer enjoy
the many things life has to offer. If you
spend your time chasing other people,
you will only chase them away; not
noticing the people who know your value.
Be the first person to know your worth.
To move on is an essential ability that
you should learn in life.
Holding on to unnecessary people,
situations,
and memories will only cause stagnation.
Pain
is inevitable but suffering can be a
choice. Do not
give other people power over your
happiness because
you are the only person responsible for
your own destiny.
Enjoy now and stop fearing the future.
There is no one formula for a successful
life. All of us are living our unique
journeys,
making life beautiful. Therefore, there is
no point in comparing your life to
others.
some may achieve early success in life
while some may take their time.
There will always be uncertainties, and
no matter how you may try to plan
things, there is no assurance that it
will go your way. But that does not mean that you should
live in fear and give up.
Living in the past causes depression;
living in the future
causes anxiety. Only by living in the
moment can you achieve
happiness. There is no deadline in life.
Do not live in suffering
by constantly comparing your life to
others. As you grow old,
things will get better, you will be wiser,
you will be stronger. Enjoy living in the
moment
and collect as many experiences as you
can.
Forgive. As you go out in life,
collect memories and friends, not enemies
and regrets.
You will never experience the true
meaning of success
if you do things out of revenge, grudge,
or trying to prove something to others.
You will find it difficult at first, but
forgiving people will be the best
decision you can make.
You are not only releasing those who
hurt you, but you are also freeing
yourself from pain.
No one is supposed to know how to live
life on their first try.
You will make several mistakes, but do
not live
life in regret. some people go out with
their everyday life
without awareness of their self-hate.
They lash out on others because deep
inside
they want to heal. Be kind to yourself.
Forgive
all your past mistakes and know that you
can always start again.
As Aaliyah said --
"dust yourself off and try again." Express
your love. Do not live a life where it is
easier for you to say the words
"I hate you" than "I love you." Value those
people who love and support you,
especially your family, and never miss a
chance to show them how much you love
them.
As you turn the pages of your life, you
will realize
how fast time flies. Life is so short to
live in pride,
hate, and regret. Do not waste years by
letting hatred steal away
time you could have spent on being
happier,
more loving, and more grateful. Be brave
enough to say
"I love you" and mean it. Before we end,
let's review our list. One -- you are enough.
Two -- take care of yourself. Number three --
spend wisely, invest your money. Four --
continue your passion. Five -- read,
invest in yourself, keep learning. Number
six --
stop trying to impress other people.
Seven --
don't waste your time on the wrong
people. Eight --
enjoy now and stop fearing the future.
Number nine --
forgive. Ten -- express your love. We do not
want to live life in regret.
Instead, we want to value the lessons we
were able to learn over the years.
Although we cannot turn back time and
correct things
that we have done, what is important is
we have evolved
for the better. The purpose of this list
is not to remind us of
what could have been, but to let us
appreciate
how much we have grown; to congratulate
ourselves for
making it out of our crazy 20's. We
may never be able to start all over
again,
but we can always continue with a better
mindset,
stronger will, and a more loving heart.
Thank you for watching and listening. If
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Let's grow together -- Love and Light,
MissJoe
