Four more shots please
So, how was your appointment with Dr. Drools?
Okay, so I was lying there with my legs wide apart..
And ooo! Woah that’s cold
Is that the clamp? or is it his
unusually long fingers?
And then, he told me-
What? Ya?
-to take a bath three times a day.
Wait, what?
With him right? Like can I come too?
Umang, you always take things in another direction
I’m Umang.
I’m a trainer,
Bisexual.
Looking for adventure..
I’m Anjana.
A lawyer,
a single mother,
and my vagina,
Just refuses to cum?
I’m Damini.
Super smart, super successful.
I also masturbate pretty often.
Much more efficient than sex.
I’m Siddhi.
I’m a virgin.
I want to get married to a
pure vegetarian Gujarati boy,
but I love non-veg.
Hey bartender!
Four shots please.
To freedom!
F***ing crazy drunk girls.
Jeh! What?! Oh my God
Hold on hold on!
I said crazy drunk girls are the best!
Big hearts and big bills.
Boris started censoring my stories.
Apologies and retraction.
Nothing else sticks.
And where are our readers?
Our audience doesn’t want to
read these heavy exposes.
But this isn’t some advertising agency.
We are a news site. We go after the
truth not the audience.
We are going to go all out,
with the kind of journalism
Investigator.com is known for,
Bold, shocking, ballsy f***ing news stories!
Sneha’s put me back on the keto diet
I told you you’ve put on weight Siddhi.
What is this?
And all your friends, are size zero.
I’m also size zero, except there’s a
one in front of it.
You know the kind of competition
there is in Mumbai?
The boy has to fall in love with her.
Ouu! what the f***?
Use this
oh my god no!
You want me to put this on my face?
It’s not used.
There’s a Kavya.
Varun is apparently very serious about her.
Wow baby, that’s beautiful!
Okay, so this is mumma? Dada? Arya? and
Kavya aunty. She’s dada’s friend
Tearing this family apart once
wasn’t enough for you?
You are the one who’s f***ing
moving on okay,
making a happy family and
home sweet home
and all that f***ing bullshit!
So you move on too.
I’ll f***ing show you what
moving on is a**hole...
I yelled at the Samara Kapoor in
the gym today,
and then I kept saying sorry,
it’s fine it’s fine
like It’s some new Punjabi pop track.
She’s my childhood crush, like I love her!
She’s easygoing, she’s pretty, she’s hot!
Hi.
Now you just...just have faith in yourself and
you’ll see it’s just going to be absolutely-
Did you...smoke up before coming here?
No...
What a shitty week man!
What a shitty week man.
I’m from Haryana.
Hot blooded,
That’s it? Session’s over?
Oh my God! Die you jerk!
Go die somewhere!
Bloody sisterf***er!
Umang?
There’s CCTV footage!
They could sue us for wilfully harming a person!
Please RTGS my this month's salary
I quit.
You’re beginning to worry me now.
Awww.
Don’t be worried sweetheart.
I’m just an overworked single mom
who’s ex husband
doesn’t contribute a single penny,
who till now thinks he’s 20 years old,
and has a new girlfriend every six months.
So I’m really sorry if I decided to relieve
myself of some of the stress.
Gossip?
That’s what the public wants Damini,
it’s what bring the hits.
Work with Akansha.
Double espresso kind of day?
Back off, back the fuck off!
This is my news site, built by me on
my reputation Amma.
This is not your news site.
If you don’t get married,
then what do you have Siddhi?
Do you even love me?
Why are you so ‘hush hush’ when saying vagina?
I mean, just say it it’s-
VAGINA!!!
Happy bithday weekend Damini!
Surprise!
Oh my God, you gorgeous idiot
Guys he’s Arjun, he’s my intern.
Ohh just like that movie
That one, the the...The Proposal!!
A hot young intern, older female boss
What? He murders her cause she’s
a horrible boss?
No no actually, they sleep together!
Hey! What the f*** ya?
Siddhi Piddhi?
Mihhu Pihhu?
Ohh f**k what a small world man?
Hi!
Hi hi!
You’ve just arrived?
Ya..
The food is over there so help yourself.
You know what I met someone,
we kind of hit it off
so what’s the problem?
Ms. Menon, the problem is you know
what you want,
but you don’t know what you need.
When you were eight years old,
Yeah?
I remember you were obsessed with water.
You remember that Holi? When you did this!
Siddhi
These pills are f***ing with my head
Nope.
It’s actually me.
You’re a goddess...
Happy birthday!
Siddhi Patel, can you come up and join me?
Siddhi piddhi, will you marry me?
Congrats
Welcome to the family
Thank you
Hey Kavya, all okay?
I’ll be back, I’m taking her to the hospital..
And I’ll book the cab for you okay?
I don’t have time Kavya,
I have to take her to the hospital now.
Samara! Ma’am! Samara!
So who is this mystery lover?
Please stop calling me.
Samara please...
Don’t ever call me again...please Umang.
I feel good with you, I feel better than good
I feel f***ing great and.
All I’m trying to say is that I want to
make this work,
I really f***ing do, okay?
Ever since I first saw ‘babygirl’ on that site,
I’ve been waiting for a chance to meet her.
You are sick!
You take your clothes off in
front of seniors right?
You bloody prostitute.
Break off your engagement to Mihir.
Arya please stay awake please stay awake! Arya?
