- Hey, guys, this is Austin
and today I'm eating lunch.
Uh, how is this mystery tech?
(whines)
What, the HAPIfork?
Eat slowly, cut calories,
and improve digestion?
I thought a smart fork was a spork?
Can I ask how much this was?
- [Ken] 65.
- $65!
At least I get a delicious salad out
of the deal so I can't
really argue too much.
- [Ken] $5 for the salad.
- The fork has a USB port on
the bottom because, naturally.
Should I clean this before I eat with it
since it just came out of the package?
Nah.
Alright, so I would like to start eating.
So I'm gonna grab a
nice bite of salad here.
(crunching)
Mm, great timing.
I agree.
Mm, take another bite.
Oh, just vibrated at me.
Not happy.
In like five more seconds.
Okay, let's do it.
I can't really test the HAPIfork
because it takes so long to chew salad.
(laughs)
Let's see if I can trick the HAPIfork.
Oh, look at that!
It's actually not falling for it.
What if I actually grab something though?
I have something on the fork.
Oh, wow!
(laughing)
I'm legitimately impressed.
I thought this was gonna be total (bleep).
Wow, that's quite loud.
This, my friends, is the
Smartphone Magnifier.
Wait, what?
(laughs)
Oh, wow, that's, that's a magnifier.
Wait, so this whole thing is cardboard?
I mean, I appreciate that they're trying
to make it look all
cool, but this retro TV
definitely didn't have S-Video in.
How much was this?
- [Ken] 30.
- $30.
Oh, wait, stuff's falling out.
Oh.
Oh, that's pretty cool.
Alright, I'll give them props.
They've got their retro
vibe totally on point.
So I guess what you do is
you put your smartphone
in the tray and then just drop it in.
There's also gonna be a
little rubber mat maybe?
Okay, so if I slide it in like this.
There we go.
That's the look right there.
As far as actually using it,
you can see absolutely
nothing until you're
looking at it directly on point.
Besides that, it gets very sort of warped
and you're sort of looking
at the top or the bottom.
But it doesn't even sound that bad, too.
Listen to that.
[Austin's Voice] And now
there's gonna be a second
generation version of that
which supposedly, again--
This is kinda cool, I gotta say.
It is a lot better than I expected.
Now, it's a total novelty,
but it kind of sounds alright.
I mean, there's some holes
for the speaker to come out.
Alright, man, alright.
I'm aboard.
Oh, man, what?
(playful music)
Ken, why do you just have a giant pillow?
I think I actually know
what this is though.
Is this one of those sequin pillows
where if you move it, oh, yup, yup.
It creates something?
Oh, no.
Oh.
I don't like where this is going.
Is this a pattern?
What is this?
It just all looks brown.
Oh, no, wait a minute.
Oh, no, this is my face!
(laughs)
Oh, wait!
No, it's Nick Cage's face!
Wow!
Where did you find this?
Oh, well, let me guess, Amazon?
- [Ken] Yes.
- Of course, it is.
So you've got your Nick Cage
face when it's party time.
When it's not party time.
Don't worry.
No Nick Cage here.
Now you see him, now you don't.
Now you see him, now you don't.
(laughs)
If Jake does not own this pillow,
we need to give him this pillow.
Jake Roper, my friends, has
multiple Nick Cage shirts.
I've seen him wear at least two of them.
I don't even wanna know how much this is
'cause it's just gonna make me upset
that money was wasted, but also.
$10?
Oh, okay, I feel much less bad about this.
Yeah, not really feelin' it.
Kinda.
Kinda hard.
Um, but it is nice to know that I'm
laying on Nick Cage's face so.
- [Ken] You're actually not.
(Austin clears throat)
- How 'bout now?
Headphones?
Okay, wait, what?
Headphones that have a
detachable cable like earbuds?
How much?
- [Ken] 150.
- $150, not a lot for Ken Bolido.
Don't worry about it.
So these are the Final
E4000 Hi-Fi earphones.
Can I take a wild guess
in that you are going
to be the proud owner of these headphones
as soon as the video is over?
- [Ken] Maybe.
- That's what I thought.
They're very lightweight.
They don't feel particularly premium,
the cable, the actual
headphones themselves.
But they do have this kind of weird shape.
Why, did my phone just
slide off the table?
- Yeah.
- It literally just slid off?
Okay, okay, that's fine.
(laughs)
Okay, bass, it's there.
Damn!
So it is going to be a
little bit more optimized
for hip hop so if you have something
that does have an accentuated bass
it's really going to punch here,
but I've never heard headphones
that have this kind of
bass that are so small,
and they also have such a wide soundstage.
You're not getting these back.
These are mine now, you realize?
Piggy Pro, the premium phone stand.
It's razor thin and infinitely adjustable.
Why is it called Piggy Pro?
There's a mirror on the inside
so if your phone stand
also wants to function
as a mirror to see like a
postage-size stamp of your face.
Postage-size stamp?
Postage.
- [Matt] Stamp-size.
- Stamp-size postage?
No, wait.
- [Matt] Nope, just stamp-sized.
Just stamp-sized, yeah.
The postage is probably
not necessary, is it?
- [Matt] Stamp is postage.
- Stamp is postage.
It's maybe not the most
color-matching thing in the world,
but let's see how this
actually works as a stand.
Oh, look, my phone stands up.
(laughs)
Nerf?
The Zombie Strike Crossbow.
This isn't tech.
I know a pillow wasn't tech,
but this definitely isn't tech.
- [Ken] It was an office recommendation.
- Oh, so I just get to shoot you
with Nerf darts now, that's?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
I mean.
- [Matt] Therefore nothing.
- This is not a normal mystery tech item.
But, I gotta say, at least
it's not a robot dinosaur.
Can't really complain about that.
Where's Roboraptor?
(Roboraptor shrieking)
My nemesis has arrived.
Wait, actually, should I
be shooting Roboraptor?
I feel like Roboraptor should be my
ally in this particular fight.
Roboraptor, are you ready?
(Roboraptor roars)
Yeah, you are.
Oh!
(laughs)
No, go away!
Ah, I missed!
It's okay.
High five.
(laughs)
Wes would not be happy
you just let me do that.
(laughs)
[Austin's Voice] Wes would not be happy
you just let me do that.
(laughs)
- Are you happy, Wes?
(Austin laughs)
- No.
