>> I WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP
FOR A FEW YEARS,
AND I THINK IN THE TIME
I WAS IN THE RELATIONSHIP,
ALL DATING COMMUNICATION
WENT EXCLUSIVELY TO TEXT.
YOU CAN'T CALL ANYBODY ANYMORE.
IF YOU CALL SOMEONE,
THEY'RE LIKE,
"WHAT? ARE YOU ON FIRE?
THEN QUIT WASTING MY TIME.
TEXT ME THAT SHIT."
AND I DON'T LIKE TEXTING PEOPLE,
ESPECIALLY GIRLS.
THERE'S ALWAYS MISCOMMUNICATION
THAT HAPPENS.
THIS IS A SITUATION
I GET INTO ALL THE TIME.
I'LL TEXT A GIRL,
SHE TEXTS ME BACK RIGHT AWAY.
I TEXT HER BACK RIGHT AWAY,
SHE TEXTS ME BACK RIGHT AWAY,
I TEXT HER BACK RIGHT AWAY,
SHE TEXTS ME BACK RIGHT AWAY,
I TEXT HER BACK RIGHT AWAY,
SHE TEXTS ME BACK RIGHT AWAY.
THEN I'LL SAY SOMETHING LIKE,
"ALL RIGHT, COOL, SO YOU WANNA
GET PIZZA ON TUESDAY?"
AND THEN I DON'T HEAR ANYTHING.
AND I'M LIKE, "WHAT
JUST HAPPENED?
I KNOW YOU READ THAT SHIT.
YOU RESPONDED TO 20 OTHER
THINGS I JUST SAID.
WHAT, DO YOU NOT
LIKE ME ANYMORE?
YOU DON'T HAVE TWO SECONDS TO
SAY, 'YES, I WANT
TO GET PIZZA,'
OR, 'NO, I DON'T WANT
TO GET PIZZA'?
WHAT, DID YOU CHECK
YOUR PHONE INTO A LOCKER
AND GO RIDE A ROLLER COASTER
FOR A FEW HOURS?
WHAT'S THE DEAL?"
AND AFTER A FEW HOURS OF
NO RESPONSE, I GET REAL UPSET.
AND I JUST WANT TO SEND A TEXT
THAT SAYS SOMETHING LIKE,
"WELL, GUESS WHO JUST GOT
UNINVITED TO THE PIZZA PARTY.
YOU DID,
'CAUSE I HATE YOU NOW."
GIRL ALWAYS WRITES
SOMETHING BACK.
"SORRY, I WAS AT MY NIECE'S
BALLET RECITAL.
WE HAD TO TURN OFF OUR PHONES."
"WHATEVER.
WE'RE DONE.
I FINISHED THAT PIZZA
HOURS AGO.
I WENT WITH MY FRIEND BRIAN.
HE'S NICE TO ME."
