 
## **Contents**

Copyright Info

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Quote

 Prologue

 Part 1

 I - False Start

 II - The World is a Vampire

 III - This Way Up

 IV - Strangers and Freaks

 V - It Never Rains

 VI - Friends and Acquaintances

 Part 2

 VII - Blackout

 VIII - Triple Trouble

 IX - Blindsided

 X - Pity Sleep

 XI - Into The Sea

 Part 3

 XII - Crazy Golf

 XIII - False Truths

 XIV - Pleasure & Pain

 XV - Lemmings

 XVI - Gluttony

 XVII - Shadowfall

 Part 4

 XVIII - Circles

 XIX - Horseplay

 XX - Godsmacked

 XXI - Rolling Thunder

 XXII - The Otherside

 XXIII - Indalo Man

JONAH THOUGHT HE WAS UNLUCKY

TURNS OUT HE WAS CHOSEN

JONAH is a work of fiction. Names, places, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously.

Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

First published by W.J. Webb, March 2017

Copyright © 2017 W.J. Webb

All rights reserved

W.J. Webb has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.

This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher's prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition, including this condition, being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

Paperback ISBN: 9781542972130

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

W.J. Webb was born in 1978 in the English town of Kidderminster, and this is his first novel. After leaving high school he found it difficult to settle into a career and at the age of 26 joined the British Army to train as a mechanic. Unfortunately, during a football training session he ruptured his right anterior cruciate ligament (knee) and was medically discharged. Now, at the age of 38, he lives in Weymouth, spends his time walking (sometimes running) along the Jurassic coast, looks for work, and occasionally tries to write a novel.

Facebook.com/WJWebbBooks

Twitter: @cobberwebb

Email: wjwebb@outlook.com

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Thank you A.R. WISE for inspiring me to start this project and for your guidance. Thank you TAMI HOLMAN for reading my dreadful early drafts, for the occasional nudge in the ribs when I was slacking, and for all the work you put in to help me get this done. Thank you to everyone at TALKINGSHIP, the greatest bunch of bastards I've come across on the internet, and where I creatively wrote for fun for the very first time. And a thank you to all my friends and family. I may not contact or speak to you often, but Facebook always reminds me you're there.

Murder is always a mistake. . . One should never do anything that one cannot talk about after dinner.

Oscar Wilde - The Picture of Dorian Gray

Prologue

Gunfire echoed in the distance.

"Friends of yours?" said a man in a black wide-brimmed hat.

A man in a white hat looked to where the gunfire came from. "Nah, just a nobody."

The midday sun cooked the sand, stone, and rock around the men. They walked in the barren land just outside town in no particular direction leaving their horses behind tied to a railing.

"What are we doing out here, man?" asked the man in the black hat.

"I like to walk, it helps me think," said the man in the white hat. He kicked a small yellow stone, a small cloud of white dust trailed him. "Women can vote in Utah now."

"So?" said the man in the black hat.

"They're making progress, however slow like I predicted."

"Social progress is one thing, evolutionary is another." The man in the black hat came to a halt. "Let's go back, man, I need a drink."

The man in the white hat removed his pocket watch and looked at the time. "I guess I should get back and check on the bar."

"You, a bartender. That still kills me."

"You know me, I like to watch people."

The man who wore the white hat slammed a shot glass of whiskey on the bar. His hat was now off and his long greying hair was tied back. "Happy now?" He leaned on the bar with both hands. "And take that damn hat off." The bartender poured himself a drink.

"Ah, I forget I have it on sometimes." The man in the black hat removed the hat and placed it on the bar. His hair was short, rough, and jet black.

"So, are you going to tell me why you've come to see me?" asked the bartender.

"Come on, Gregory, can't a buddy visit once in awhile?"

"Why now?" Gregory wasn't convinced it was just a friendly visit. He knocked back his drink and poured another.

The black man followed his lead and Gregory refilled the glass.

"Fine," said the black man. "Rumours are growing."

Gregory puffed out his cheeks, "What? That you really are the son of God?!"

"That's funny!" The black man knocked his drink back but Gregory didn't refill it. "Well?"

"Well what?" said Gregory.

"Refill please."

"Rumours, what rumours?" asked Gregory.

The black man pointed at his empty glass and Gregory reluctantly filled it.

"Shadows have been sighted," said the black man.

"I'm sure I can see a few from here. There, look. That horse is casting one right now."

"You know what I mean, Gregory. Demons."

"Impossible, we wiped-"

"Hey you!" someone shouted.

The bar became silent and everyone looked at the entrance: a few angry-looking men stood there, they were looking directly at the black man.

"Here we go," the black man said to himself. He downed his drink.

"Friends of yours?" asked Gregory.

"I don't have any friends, not white ones anyway."

"I'm hurt."

"You're not welcome here, get out!" yelled one of the angry men.

"First of all it's my bar, and second, he's with me," said Gregory.

"Get back to serving drinks, bartender," the angry man said.

"Are you going to let him talk to you like that?" said the black man to Gregory.

"Don't make trouble," said Gregory. "Gentlemen, please. I'm not going to throw him out, so just take a seat and I'll bring you a drink."

One of the men spat out thick brown liquid onto the wooden floor and then reached for his gun. He fired off one round and it hit the black man in the chest.

Gregory's head dropped. "Goddammit."

"It's not my fault," said the black man as he poked a finger through the bullet hole in his jacket.

"Why is it that when you visit I end up having to relocate?" said Gregory.

"Last time wasn't my fault either!"

The angry men just stared blankly at the two arguing. The one that shot the black man inspected his gun.

The black man continued, "I'm never gonna hear the end of it am I?"

"Then you shouldn't have resurrected!" said Gregory. "Come on, let's go. You can tell me about the demons on the way."

The other two men shot the black man, but it didn't hurt him. The bullets penetrated his clothes but not his skin. Gregory and his friend left the bar leaving its occupants confused.

"On the way to where?" the black man asked Gregory.

"England."

Part 1

Dreams & Nightmares

I - False Start

(40 years ago)

"Slow the fuck down!" screamed Sarah.

"Just let me drive!" yelled Myles. "I don't want this kid popping out on the back seat!"

"If you crash, you won't have a choice"-Sarah panted and tried to control her breathing-"And if that happens I'll strangle you with the umbilical cord!"

Myles took in a deep breath and decided he was, after all, driving a little too dangerously. He slowed a little, but still exceeded the speed limit.

With the hospital now less than two miles away and his wife in the back seat of the brown Ford Cortina breathing deeply, Myles's excitement grew, he was about to become a father.

Sarah stared into the rear view mirror with a look Myles knew all too well, her eyes said all that needed to be said: I need you. Those same eyes pierced his heart the moment they met in the supermarket three years earlier, and those eyes had lost none of their sparkle. Her long straight blond hair, her hourglass figure and long legs, and her full lips were all just little added bonuses. It was the woman inside that he loved, not the eye candy that everybody else saw. Myles never forgot their first meeting. He made a fool of himself in the supermarket thinking that his colleague, Mark, and Sarah were an item, even though Mark told Myles about his sister many times before.

Myles towered over most at 6' 3", but he also had brown permed hair which added another three inches to his height. Sarah liked tall men and immediately accepted when he asked her out to dinner and a movie. Sarah looked bored in the dimly lit theatre that night and Myles was about to suggest leaving when Sarah caught him off guard. She rested her head on his shoulder, gripped his arm with a warm hand, and she fell asleep. Myles felt his heart melt in his chest and knew then this woman would be his future wife.

"How far is it?!" asked Sarah, bringing Myles's focus back to the present.

"Almost there, honey. Stay calm."

The stress level rose in her voice, "I don't know if I can do this."

"Hey, I'm gonna be next to you the whole time," said Myles. "There's nothing to worry about. I love you." He looked at Sarah and smiled.

"I love you too," Sarah answered. "But please keep your eyes on the fucking road!"

Myles looked back to the road. "Okay, we're almost there. Hang on."

The Ford Cortina ground to a halt outside the hospital entrance, Myles leapt from behind the steering wheel, slid over the car bonnet, and opened the back door in one swift movement as if he'd been practising this manoeuvre for such an occasion. He was dressed in bell-bottom blue jeans and a shirt with orange and brown swirls which offended the eyes . Myles waited as Sarah swung her legs out of the car and as she struggled to stand he placed a hand under her armpit and helped her to her feet.

"You okay, honey?" Myles asked.

"Never been better," Sarah replied with sarcasm.

The hospital reception was quiet until the couple entered, the strawberry-blond receptionist immediately realised what was happening and called for a porter to attend to Sarah. A man soon arrived and was about to wheel her off to the appropriate ward when the receptionist called out. "Sir!" she shouted. "You can't leave your car outside the entrance. You need to move it."

"Damn it!" Myles blurted.

"Come back here when you've parked up, and I'll direct you to your wife," said the receptionist.

Myles bent down to Sarah, "I won't be a sec."

"Okay, hun. But please be quick, I need you."

Myles kissed Sarah's forehead and dashed to his car. He jumped into the driver's seat banging his head off the metal door frame in the process. "Mother fucker!" he cursed. Myles touched his head where it hurt and checked for blood. There was none. He reached into his pocket to find his keys, but they weren't there. "What the fuck?" Then he noticed they were still in the ignition. Myles slammed the door shut, started the engine, and wheel spun the car into motion.

The car park wasn't large and it didn't take Myles long to circle it five times to find there were no spaces. This was not what he needed right now. "Damn it! Not a single fuckin' space?" said Myles as he headed for the the exit.

The hospital was close to a residential area and he had no choice but to park outside of the hospital grounds. But as he soon found out, he was not the only one to think of this. The surrounding streets were crammed with vehicles parked on both sides of the road. Myles crept the car up and down the streets ready to pounce into an open space.

Fifteen minutes had now passed since Myles parted with Sarah and the distance between them was growing. It was going to take at least another thirty to walk back to the hospital, maybe ten if he ran.

"This can't be happening!" he said as he turned into another street.

A space finally appeared and Myles bumped his car into the gap hoping no damage was being done to either vehicle. When he was satisfied it was parked he jumped from the Cortina and ran for the hospital praying that Sarah was okay.

Out of breath and sweaty, Myles re-entered the hospital's reception. The receptionist looked up from her desk. "There you are!" she said. "I didn't think you were coming back. Thought you'd done a runner."

"Do I look like I'm in the mood for jokes?" Myles snapped.

"No, I suppose not. But it has been forty five minutes." She tapped her watch.

"I know that! I couldn't find anywhere to park. Please, just tell me where I can find my wife." His face showed desperation, he needed to be by Sarah's side.

"Calm down Mr..." she waited for Myles to finish her sentence.

"Burns, Myles Burns, God damn it!"

The receptionist was getting annoyed. "Your wife could be in labour for hours yet. So there is no need to panic or be rude. Okay?"

Something inside Myles snapped.

Time slowed, the fluorescent lighting shifted to a shade of orange, and the world became quiet. Myles turned his head, the few visitors that occupied the waiting area were motionless. The receptionist, a middle-aged woman and two small children, a priest, and an elderly man checking his watch, all were still. The lights shifted again, closer to red now than orange. A fly entered his peripheral vision and slowly flew past Myles's head, but before it was out of reach Myles grabbed it and squeezed. He turned his head back to face the receptionist and in an instant normality returned. Myles felt broken. He looked in his hand and saw the dead fly along with its insides now on the outside.

Myles rounded the desk and closed in on the receptionist's face until he could smell the coffee on her breath. He stared into her blue eyes and spoke in a calm but threatening manner. "Where can I find my fucking wife you useless excuse for a human being before I flatten that nose across your face."

Terror drained the colour from the receptionist's face and tears of fear began to blur her vision. Myles's face remained there, eyes close and unblinking.

The receptionist raised a shaky arm and pointed. "T-t-to your r-right, head down there th-then take a left at the end."

Myles turned his head to the right, turned it back, and then looked down at the receptionist's name badge. An abnormally wide smile stretched across his face. "Thank you, Gwen," said Myles. "You have been most helpful."

Myles wiped his hand on Gwen's upper arm to clean off the fly remnants, he turned and ran down the corridor leaving Gwen horrified and shaking in her chair as if she had just met the devil himself.

Myles reached the end of a sterile white corridor but something was wrong. "What the fuck? There is no left!" Myles looked around him. "That fucking bitch!" he cursed. Myles had no choice but to turn right and look for any sign of the maternity ward.

Thick stainless steels doors of an elevator behind Myles opened to reveal a man in a long white coat. Myles ran to him. "Excuse me doctor!" Myles said breathing heavy. "Where's the maternity ward?"

"Huh?" the doctor looked up from his clipboard and saw the tall, thin, panicking man. "Oh, yeah, right. It's this way, not far," the doctor explained. "Just carry on down there and look out for the sign pointing to the ward. It will be on your left."

"Thanks, doc!" said Myles.

"No problem. Congratulations?" said the doctor. But Myles was already gone.

As Myles disappeared down the corridor, more concerned at being at his wife's side than being polite to strangers, the thought of her being alone through childbirth was killing him. He had to be there, no matter what.

He saw the sign pointing to where he needed to be. "Finally!" he said as he turned left onto the ward. Another reception desk greeted him and as he halted he slammed both palms on the desk's wooden surface. "Sarah Burns?" he yelled out of breath.

"And you are?" a young black-haired woman asked from behind the desk.

Myles looked at the name badge. "Emily?" he said.

"Really? That's my name too!" said Emily. "But I've never heard of a man named Emily before."

"Myles Burns, my name is Myles Burns!" His face was getting redder and angrier. "Holy fucking God what's with you people!"

"Ah, okay. Just give me a sec." Emily cursed at Myles under her breath while she checked a piece of paper. She frowned, picked up a telephone and dialled a number. "Hello? Yes, I have Myles Burns here at reception... yes, her husband... that's right... okay." She replaced the handset.

"Well, where is she?" Myles asked.

"A doctor is on his way to meet you, Mr. Burns. He won't be a moment."

Myles stood there confused. "What the hell is going on?"

"Mr. Burns?" someone said.

Myles spun around. "Yes?"

A doctor almost as tall as Myles stood next to him. "Come with me please." The doctor walked away with Myles in tow.

Brown wooden doors appeared either side at regular intervals, the sterile white corridor looked familiar and he thought about what would happen if there were no signs at all in hospitals, you could be forever lost in one.

"My name is Dr. Millward." He stopped and looked around, no one was nearby. "Your wife has already given birth. You have a healthy baby boy." Dr. Millward poked the middle of his glasses and ran a hand through his light brown hair.

"That's great!" Myles's face lit up. "So where are they? Sarah is going to kill me for not being there but-"

"Mr. Burns, your wife, there were complications during childbirth." Dr. Millward looked into Myles's eyes. "She didn't make it. I'm sorry."

Myles's heart plummeted to the souls of his feet and his skin turned white. "I-I don't understand. Didn't make it? What do you mean?" A lump the size of a water melon seemed to be lodged in his throat.

"We're not sure what happened yet. She lost consciousness and went into cardiac arrest. We were unable to revive her." The doctor put a hand on Myles's shoulder. "We did everything we could. I'm sorry."

Myles slid down the corridor wall until he hit the floor, he leaned forward and placed his palms on the ground and screamed. The white walls bounced the tormented cries around the hospital, the echo escaped into the world outside where it evaporated unnoticed.

Two male porters helped Myles up from the floor and led him to a private room where his cries were somewhat muted. He sat on the bed, eyes red and sodden, his throat was sore. He thought about how his wife spent her last moments alone and in pain, his cries started again. How could he go on without her? She meant everything to him. Myles cried and screamed and begged.

An hour passed before Myles emerged from the room, Dr. Millward saw him and approached the defeated man with caution. Myles raised his head a little, his voice was soft, "Can I see her?" he asked.

"Of course," said Dr. Millward. "This way."

The walk to the morgue was silent, it was as if the whole hospital had become still, quiet and disconnected from reality again.

They entered the room. One wall was covered in stainless steel square doors and each of them was labelled and a single stainless steel table sat in the centre.

Myles shivered, he was unsure if it was a chill in the air or from the knowledge of being in a room full of dead bodies. Dr. Millward opened a container, pulled out the drawer, and then carefully peeled back the sheet to reveal Sarah's face and shoulders. Myles's smile only lasted a split second before the fall of tears returned. He reached out and felt her cheek with his palm, touch her forehead with his own and closed his eyes. "Sarah, I'm so sorry I wasn't there," he whispered. "I love you, please come back to me." He sobbed knowing he wouldn't get his wish.

The doctor needed Myles to focus on what was more important now so he placed a comforting hand on Myles. "Mr. Burns," said Dr. Millward. "Maybe you should see your son."

"My son?" Myles opened his eyes.

"Yes, he's going to need you."

Myles straightened up and reluctantly removed his hand from Sarah's cheek. He wiped away the tears and nodded. "Let's go and see my son."

Myles looked down at the fragile creature in the bassinet. His eyes were firmly shut, asleep without a care in the world. Then as if the child knew he was being watched he reached out with his tiny hands.

"Do you want to hold him?" asked the nurse.

"Yeah, sure. You know, since he's awake now."

The nurse carefully slid a hand underneath the child's soft head and then slid the other hand under his backside. She lifted the child and gently passed him on to Myles. The new born cackled and garbled but he didn't cry. The child's eyes were still closed and his dark hair looked as if it would blow away in the softest of breezes.

A sparkle returned to Myles's eyes as he looked upon the life that Sarah had left him with. A life that would never know how kind and beautiful his mother was.

Some motion around the room became obvious. Myles looked up as the door swung open and two police officers entered.

"Are you Myles Burns?" asked one of the policemen.

"Yes? What can I do for you?"

"We need to ask you some questions regarding an incident with a woman named Gwen Roberts."

"And she is?" Myles asked.

"The woman you threatened at the main reception desk," the officer quickly answered.

"What? When?" Myles had no idea what they were talking about.

"Please sir, you need to come with us."

"Oh for fucks sake!" Myles said as loudly as he dared. He looked at the infant in his arms. "Can you just give me a minute?"

"Okay," said one of the policemen. "We'll just be outside. Don't be long."

They left the room leaving Myles with his son and a nervous looking nurse. The nurse plucked up some courage. "Do you have a name?"

Myles looked at the nurse and then at the child. "Oh yes, we chose names in advance."

Myles felt tears starting to well up again, so he lowered the infant back into the bassinet.

"It's okay, you'll be alright," the nurse assured. "But you better deal with them though." She nodded towards the door and the policemen outside.

"Yeah. Suppose you're right," Myles said. He bent down over the bassinet, gave his son a gentle kiss on the forehead and whispered, "Jonah."

II - The World is a Vampire

Jonah shot upright on his bed desperate for air. He checked the corners of his dark bedroom for signs of movement. Nothing. He relaxed, lay back down, closed his eyes, and tried to remember the cause of his rude awakening and consternation.

He rubbed his face with his palm and muttered to himself, "Fucking video games." The dream was coming back to him: The enemy he tried to shoot dodged every attack. A Phantom. It was fast, agile, invisible, and armed with a deadly Japanese katana. The Phantom had plunged the katana into Jonah's chest.

The LED digital alarm clock on the other side of the room displayed 03:12 AM in red. He bounced onto his side determined to get back to sleep as fast as possible, but his bladder protested.

"Shit!" Jonah spat.

He tore back the bed covers and climbed to his feet. The wooden floorboards creaked in protest under his heavy six foot two inch frame as he made his way, in the dark, to the bathroom. He pulled on the cord dangling from the ceiling and illuminate the bathroom. The light blinded Jonah momentarily, but it was better than mopping up any mess from shooting in the dark.

"Happy now?" Jonah said to his penis as he shook off the remaining drops of urine.

As he pulled the cord to switch off the light it snapped. Jonah stood there, eyebrows raised in bemusement looking at his hand which contained a piece of dirty white thread. A huge sigh escaped from Jonah's lungs and he tossed the cord remnants over his shoulder. "My so called life begins today, does it?"

He stomped back to the bedroom, climbed into his bed, closed his eyes, and thought about the last forty years.

The LED clock displayed 06:51 AM and Jonah continued to lie in his bed as the loud alarm screamed at him. He hadn't slept a wink since waking earlier, his mind had refused to let him rest and instead, tormented him with memories of his past. He just hoped another one wasn't going to be made today on his fortieth birthday. The constant alarm finally took its toll so Jonah leaped from his bed and silenced it with his fist.

Standing in front of the bathroom mirror Jonah contemplated shaving off his beard again. It was thick, unkempt, and along with his messy long brown hair, he resembled a bear rudely awoken from hibernation.

He moved his head closer to the mirror and stared into his brown eyes, then he looked at his beard again and noticed something. "Really?" he said. "The day I turn forty, is the day I find a grey hair?" Jonah flipped a middle finger at his beard and plucked the offending whisker from his face. "Son of a bitch!" He tossed the hair into the toilet and checked the rest of his head and face for more. Jonah sighed in relief when none were found and continued with his usual morning routine to get ready for work.

Jonah thought about the huge decrease in income he had had to suffer with as he drove. The metallic silver BMW he was driving would have to go, the cost of running this car was too damn high. The fuel, the insurance, and the service it required cost a small fortune for a man now earning near minimum wage. But the job he had was the only job he could get at such short notice. He was a delivery driver for a small courier business and he was already bored with it. The only upside was that most days he finished his work by two thirty and he did as he pleased for the remaining couple of hours, which for the most part was taking a long nap.

Jonah pulled into the car park and climbed out of the low seat. He walked into the depot via the side entrance reserved for employees and pulled his phone out of his pocket to check the time. Fifteen minutes early as per usual, time to clock in and make a coffee before he loaded the van.

The canteen, or something that resembled a canteen, was dull. A few fluorescent tubes were missing as were the semi-transparent covers. Many of the white fibre ceiling tiles were now yellowing and blotched with water stains. The walls weren't much better, more magnolia dulled the light, a notice board, with no more than two scraps of paper pinned to it, hung in the corner.

Then there was Ted. Ted was sat at a nest of tables in the centre of the canteen, five metal lockers lined the wall behind them. Ted was small, fat, and balding. He was so short that Jonah honestly thought he was as wide as he was tall. Ted read his tabloid, page 3 to be precise, and sipped at his coffee.

"Mornin', Joe," Ted greeted. His eyes fixed on the paper.

"Morning, Theodore," Jonah replied. "Is it Friday yet?"

Ted looked at Jonah. "You look like shit. And no, tomorrow is Friday."

"Still the same joke every morning eh, Theodore?"

"It really isn't Friday, Joe."

"Hardy fuckin' ha."

Jonah didn't like being called Joe and Ted knew it. So Jonah responded with Theodore hoping he would get the message. He never did.

"Is Sue in yet?" Jonah asked.

Ted finally turned the page. "Yeah, but I'd keep away if I were you. She's trying to sell her collection of old boy-band CDs. She even has an Ebay store."

A dry smile crept onto Jonah's face. "She sells bullshit on the shit store."

Ted processed the comment. "Ha! That's a good'un,"

"Oh that reminds me," said Jonah. "Interested in buying a games console?"

"A what?"

"You know, an xbox."

"Do I look like someone who plays games?" asked Ted.

"Well..."

"No, I don't."

"Okay, okay! Unbunch your panties." Jonah found a piece of paper and a pen in a drawer and started to write.

"What are you writing?" asked Ted.

"I'm advertising the old fashioned way." Jonah walked to the crumbling caulk notice board and pinned on the note. He check the time again. "Right, I'm gonna go and load up. See ya later, Theodore."

"Okay, Joe."

The word Joe screeched through Jonah's ears like fingernails scraping the inside of an icy freezer. He snatched his time card from off the wall, punched in, replaced the card, and walked off hugging his mug. The mornings still had a sharp chill to them and Jonah was looking forward to when spring started to finally merge with summer. "I hate these cold fuckin' mornings," Jonah moaned into his mug.

The delivery company was very small compared to some of the major outfits nationwide and Jonah preferred this. He had seen couriers speed around like headless chickens, vans full to the roofs with parcels and on top of that, they worked 12 hours a day. Jonah knew this due to already applying for such positions. He looked over to his small pile of parcels and sighed with relief. His deliveries covered a large area, but there were fewer drops than the others and they were mostly always to the same addresses. The same people, places, and route every day.

Jonah grabbed his van keys which hung from a metal hook screwed to the outside of the canteen wall and then walked to his dirty grey van parked outside. A thin layer of ice had covered the large windscreen overnight, Jonah unlocked the driver's side door, climbed in, and started the engine. He looked over at the heating controls in the middle of the dashboard, he flicked the air flow and temperature to maximum, and then made sure that the heat was blowing onto the screen. Jonah returned to the building.

The depot was just a warehouse, half of it was separated into even sized sections where the driver could load up, the other half was for goods coming in to be sorted for delivery. He walked over to his section and quickly looked through the day's deliveries, about twenty in total, and saw that he recognised all of the addresses.

"Hmmm, looks like I'll be able to catch up on my sleep after all." Jonah grinned. He opened the large shutters, walked back to the van, reversed the vehicle to his section, and loaded the cargo.

The other drivers had all arrived by now and were chit-chatting in the canteen. There were only four of them in total, but Jonah wasn't interested in getting to know them. He just wanted to keep to himself, do his job and go home. Ted had forced himself as a friend but Jonah didn't mind him so much anymore.

The sound of heeled shoes bounced off the walls and a woman's voice soon followed. "Jonah?"

"Yeah?" Jonah answered. Sue emerged and stood at the rear of the van. She was young, blond (fake blond), blue-eyed, and in her early twenties. She was very pretty and she knew it. Today she was especially pretty, she wore a tight navy blue dress that amplified her curves.

Jonah faced her while still hunched over in the back of the van. "Oh Sue, you're sight for sore eyes," he said.

"Really?"

"Yeah really. Didn't get much sleep, the sight of Ted this morning almost killed me." Jonah smiled.

"Well thank you. Here, I wanted to give you this." She bounced on her toes, reached out with both hands and offered Jonah an envelope.

"What's this?" he asked.

"You know full well what this is. When the office staff were notified of your employment, I peeked at your application and marked your birthday on my calendar."

"Your calendar?"

"Yes, on my computer."

"So you do this for all the staff here?" Jonah quizzed.

"Well, no. It just looked like you were in need of cheering up this week." She looked around in search of something. "Where are the cakes?"

Jonah never liked that tradition, he thought his colleagues should buy him cakes on his birthday, not the other way around. "Ya caught me, I'm a cheapskate."

"With a car like that?" said Sue.

"That will be gone soon enough, can't afford the luxury any more, not on this salary."

"Is that why you've looked so down. Oh sorry!" Sue looked embarrassed. "It's none of my business, I should get back to the office."

Sue's face turned a little red which made her look even more beautiful.

"It's all right, I should try a little harder to cheer up." Jonah didn't like the fact she was looking uncomfortable. "I heard you're selling some CDs, right?"

"Oh you're interested? I thought that she sells seashells on the seashore?" Sue said not wanting to repeat word for word what she'd heard.

It was Jonah's moment to turn red. "Bollocks to hell that damn midget!" he cursed under his breath.

"It's okay, Jonah, really." Sue touched his huge upper arm. "I thought it was funny, and you don't have to pretend you're interested. My taste in music has changed a lot in the last few years, that's why I'm getting rid." She moved her hand down his arm and held his. "Have a happy fortieth, and don't get caught napping." She winked at Jonah and didn't let go off his hand until their arms were at full stretch. Sue walked off leaving Jonah with the sound of her fading footsteps.

Jonah looked at the envelope for moment then decided to open it. He pulled out the card and received a shock.

'My gift to you' headlined the card, and underneath was a photo of Sue in a thread-bare bikini. She was standing, leaning forward towards the camera so that her cleavage could clearly be seen. She was winking at him as she did just a moment ago.

Is she interested in me?

He opened the card and read the contents: To Jonah, I hope this card brightens up your birthday ;) love Susie oxoxox P.S. ask me out sometime.

That confirmed his suspicion.

But she must be at least 15 years younger than me!

Jonah shook his head to clear his mind, this wasn't the time to be thinking of new romances, he needed to get his life back on track first, if that was even possible. He slid the card back in its envelope, reached over and placed it on the passenger seat.

All the deliveries were ticked off and accounted for, he could finally get out onto the road. With all the doors secure he jumped into the driver's seat, started the engine, and rolled out of the depot.

By two o'clock all the deliveries had been made. Jonah found a quiet country lane, a safe place to park and as he closed his eyes, Sue's voice echoed: Have a happy fortieth, and don't get caught napping. Sue's image on the card filled his mind as he lay across the front seats of the van and fell asleep.

A phone rang and stirred Jonah back to consciousness. He dug into his pocket, found the device and answered it.

A groggy Jonah spoke, "Hello?"

"You sound like shit!" said Ted.

Jonah put on a bad Indian accent, "Thank you for calling. Mumbai Palace is open from 5PM to-"

"Nice try. Get up and get back."

"Just five more minutes?"

"If you're late back, they'll wonder why," said Ted. "Then they'll start testing the routes, and we'll be fucked."

"Is it Friday yet?" asked Jonah.

"Just get back, or I'll have Sue all to myself."

"Fat fuckin' chance!"

Ted hung up.

Even though the depot hummed with life, making a quiet getaway was easier than expected. He didn't want to run into Sue just yet as he wanted time to think about how to deal with the situation. Jonah clocked out and swiftly walked over to his car.

"Not sneaking away are you, Joe?"

Jonah knew that voice. "You got me, Ted." He closed in on the BMW. "Who told you? Sue?"

Ted shuffled from behind the car. "She might have whispered something in my ear."

"Doubt she got that close."

"As far as I can tell, I'm your only friend. I'm starting to see why."

Jonah contorted his face.

"Don't give me that look, Jonah," said Ted. "A joke is a joke, but constant put-downs wear thin."

Jonah stared at him for a minute. "You're right. Sorry."

They both leaned on the back of the BMW and it creaked under the weight, the sun was low in the sky behind them, their shadows stretched out in front.

"Don't take it too hard," said Ted.

"Oh I won't, but you're right though-"

"And let's leave it there," interrupted Ted.

Jonah understood, he didn't want a long therapeutic conversation about it either. He fancied a drink or two today and wouldn't mind a little company.

"So," said Jonah, "want to join me for a- shit!"

"Join you for a shit? Really?" Then Ted saw what Jonah saw: Sue was headed towards them. "Ah shit!"

"She looks mad," said Jonah.

"She looks like she hasn't had it in a while."

"Just stay quiet, I'll handle this."

Sue reached them, they didn't move or speak.

"Well this looks suspicious!" she said.

Ted didn't say anything.

"Move along please, miss, official business," commanded Jonah.

Sue put her hands on her hips. "You don't get rid of me that easily. So, where are we going?"

"Going?" quizzed Jonah.

"Don't give me that. Birthday drinks, and I won't take no for an answer."

"You heard the lady, Ted, where are we going?" Jonah looked hard at Ted.

"We?" Ted looked hard back at Jonah.

Jonah gave him a look.

"Well," continued Ted, "my wife is heavily pregnant so I'll only be out for an hour." He thought for a moment. "Maybe less."

Jonah jumped in, "Of course, and being a work night I can't get drunk and risk being over the limit in the morning. You understand."

Sue narrowed her eyes. "Okay ladies, have it your way. A few quiet drinks in the Rose & Crown good enough?"

"About eight o'clock?" Jonah asked.

"Good for me," replied Sue. "Ted?"

"Yeah, sure."

An awkward silence was interrupted by the sound of a car horn. It was followed by a voice from a young man hanging out the passenger side window.

"Need a man to show you a good time, babe!"

Jonah rose to his feet, he towered over Sue who was in front of him facing the rowdy young man. The expression on the young man's face changed, it wasn't fear, it was the look of someone who knew he was already beaten and realised his own inadequacy.

Sue saw the change in the man and then noticed the huge shadow on the ground, but she didn't turn to look at him. "Thanks, big guy." She walked away and headed back to the depot.

Ted pushed himself off the back of the car. "What was that about me staying quiet?"

"She had me against the ropes!" Jonah protested.

Ted snorted, "You wimp."

"How late is beyond fashionably late?" asked Jonah.

Ted smiled and drank some of his beer before answering. "Someone seems eager to see someone."

They both looked at the pub's entrance as the door opened, but it wasn't Sue. The grimy old establishment was small, and being a Thursday, empty.

Jonah spoke, "I'm just curious to see what she's gonna wear, that's all."

"When the hell did you start caring about women's fashion?" asked Ted.

"Oh I don't know." Jonah raised his eyebrows. "Sue has an interesting dress sense at work, I was looking forward to seeing what it's like on a night out."

Ted caught on, "I think you want to see what might pop out."

Jonah gave Ted a look. "You dirty old man." He drank from his pint glass before he continued. "And to think you're gonna be a father soon." Jonah also remembered something else. "And you're married? Where did all that come from?"

"It just shows what you know about me, and that you show no interest in my life," said Ted.

"God you sound like all my ex-girlfriends," said Jonah.

"Then maybe you should take the hint."

"When is she due?"

"Yesterday."

"First kid?"

"Yep."

"Figures."

The door opened again and the people who entered the pub a minute ago left.

"I guess it's not their kind of place," Ted said.

"Ted, we're the only ones in here, it's no-one's kind of place."

This time the door opened with force and Sue made a crashing entrance.

"Well that's one way to make an entrance," Jonah said.

"Very fashionable," added Ted.

Sue saw the pair sat at the table in the corner. "Cooee!"

They raised their eyebrows in unison.

"Cooee?" repeated Ted.

"I'm already regretting this."

"Who says cooee these days?" asked Ted.

"Drunk people."

Ted looked at his watch on hearing Jonah's comment. "It's only eight thirty!"

"She's... petite, it would only take a shandy."

They watched as Sue hung up her coat with difficulty.

"Jesus," said Ted.

"This should be interesting," Jonah said into his beer.

"Damn!" Ted started to search his pockets, he lifted his phone and pointed it at Sue so she appeared on the screen.

"No, don't," ordered Jonah. "I hate it when people do that."

"Do what?" Ted lowered the phone.

"Take advantage."

"So if she-"

"No I wouldn't," Jonah interrupted. He looked at Ted, "Would you?"

"Of course not!"

"So you didn't have to get your wife drunk before you got her pregnant?"

"You're such an asshole." Ted finished his beer and stood up.

"Oh come on, Ted, I didn't mean it."

"See you in the morning, Jonah." Ted placed a hand on Jonah's shoulder, "Good luck."

They looked at Sue who was at the bar. "You're really gonna leave me alone with her, aren't you," said Jonah.

"You know she wants it to be just the two of you." Ted crept out of the pub before Sue noticed.

"Fuck!" snorted Jonah.

Sue finally finished paying for her drink at the bar and stumbled over to Jonah.

"Ted gone for a pish?" Sue slurred.

"No, he left."

"Why?" she asked.

"It was something I said," he admitted.

"Did you huuurt his feewings?"

"Maybe."

"Yeah, you need to work on that," she said while stabbing him in the chest with a finger.

Jonah scrunched his face. "Not you too."

Sue wobbled into the chair next to his.

"How much have you had?" he asked.

"Only a few. I met with some fffffwriends." Sue rested her head on Jonah's large upper arm. "I'm actually glad it's jus' the two of us."

Jonah felt a hand on his thigh and he felt himself beginning to sweat.

Sue's birthday card sat on the computer desk in Jonah's living room in full view, not that it mattered, no one ever visited him. He rarely had phone calls except for the nuisance callers claiming he could claim a refund on payment protection insurance for a loan he had never taken out.

His phone's screen lit up accompanied by a message tone. He picked it up and read the message: Happy birthday, son. Myles.

That old bastard.

"Time to get a new number," he said under his breath.

He viewed some old photos of his father playing with him in a playground. His memories of this time were patchy at best.

My father, my creator. What a joke.

Jonah continued to click through the images and then suddenly stopped. An image on the screen burned a hole in his heart.

What did you see in him?

He finished the glass of whiskey and slammed it on the desk. He passed out on his bed but the image of his mother lingered.

III - This Way Up

(32 years ago)

Jonah sat alone in the quiet school. He heard occasional footsteps echo down the halls as he waited patiently.

His father and headmaster, Mr. Harris, conversed in the office near him and hoped he wasn't in trouble. He had never been in trouble, never been in a fight, kept himself to himself, and most importantly, never stood out from the other children. The child heard mumblings emerge from the office but couldn't assemble them into words.

Jonah looked out the windows that lined the inner wall of the school. He scanned the small courtyard at the school's centre which was open to the elements and thought of the school as a giant square doughnut, the small courtyard being the hole. He decided to calculate the surface area of this 'square doughnut' to waste some time but could only give a fairly rough estimate due to not knowing any measurements. He then realised he didn't know the mathematical term for a torus that was square in shape or even if one existed. He decided to look it up the next time he and his father went to the public library. Jonah also looked at the various potted plants he and his classmates had carefully cared for, they were not mature plants but no longer seedlings either. Everything these plants absorbed mattered greatly at this time in their development and they reminded Jonah of himself and the other students of this school. He thought about a recent test he was made to do. Jonah enjoyed it, it was challenging, but he wondered why he was the only child to do it.

The shadows of the building became longer as he sat there alone. Imaginary monsters hid in the dark corners, the shadows hid the evil from sight. Jonah didn't believe in such things, but he imagined them anyway. He imagined a shadow moving in the corner of his eye so he blinked a long blink.

Jonah planted his feet in defiance and moved over to the water fountain a few metres away. He pressed down on the stainless steel button and took a big slurp of water, it was warm and tasted metallic. Echoing footsteps filled the air, but he didn't look to see where they came from. He finished slurping and turned to find a man dressed in black standing next to him.

"Hello, son," the man said in a deep voice.

Jonah jumped, gave out a small yelp, and then froze on the spot.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you," said the man. He smiled through his thick, white beard which matched his scruffy white hair. Jonah relaxed slightly when he thought of him as a thin Santa Claus dressed in black. All that was missing were the rosy cheeks.

"H-Hello sir," Jonah squeaked.

"You're not in trouble I hope," said the man.

"I don't think so," Jonah replied. "I never get in trouble."

"Oh? Aren't all little boys supposed to get in trouble?" the man in black asked.

"I... I don't know."

"Well then, you must have very happy parents."

Jonah faced the floor and didn't answer, he interlocked his hands and circled his thumbs around each other. He didn't like the clothes the man was wearing. This man didn't belong here.

The man continued, "Well I guess God doesn't have to worry about you if you continue to be good." The priest placed a hand on the child's head. "I have to go, but remember"-Jonah looked up at the old man-"It's okay to have fun and get into a little trouble sometimes, it's part of growing up." The priest knelt down on one knee and whispered, "Just don't tell anyone I said that, okay?" He winked at Jonah, raised himself, and walked off down the corridor.

Jonah watched the old man walk away and disappear around a corner which led to the staff room. Looking a little confused, he turned and sat down on the chair outside of the headmaster's office.

The office door finally opened and Myles emerged from the room, he towered over the child. "Time to go, come on," he ordered.

The child jumped to his feet, but before he took a step, a voice bellowed from inside the office. "Goodbye, Jonah, see you tomorrow!"

"Goodbye Mr. Harris!" Jonah replied.

He picked up his satchel from under the chair and caught up to his father who had already begun walking down the corridor. Jonah reached out and held his father's hand.

"Am I in trouble?" Jonah asked, breaking the silence in the car.

Myles hadn't spoken a word since leaving school which made Jonah a little worried. "No, you're not," Myles said.

"Oh."

The old Ford Cortina rattled away and so did Jonah's mind. The dodgy suspension might shake your head loose one day, Jonah remembered his father's friend tell him. He sat in the front passenger seat, the beige plastic dash was stained and various bits of interior hung down looking tired.

"Do you remember taking a test a few weeks ago?" Myles asked.

"Umm, yes," Jonah replied, "but I was the only one that did it."

"Do you think you are different to the other kids in class?"

Jonah's forehead wrinkled. "No, am I?"

Myles glanced over at his son and smiled. "A little, but not in a bad way."

The Ford Cortina rattled even harder as it hit a pothole in the road.

"Shit!" Myles grimaced. "Sorry, kiddo."

The steering wheel pulled to the left and the sound of metal being dragged on asphalt squealed in their ears.

"Oh what now?" moaned Myles. He slowed the car and pulled over. "Stay there, Jonah." Myles walked around the front of the car to Jonah's side, lay on his back and wriggled under behind the front wheel to get a closer look.

The sky became shades of pinks and oranges as the sun touched the horizon, Jonah thought about how he might be different to the others and that he didn't want to be different. He looked through the windows and saw nothing but houses, high-rise residential flats, and a few small patches of grass. He saw a climbing frame in a little playground over the road and counted how many steel tubes were need to construct it.

It wasn't long before Myles re-emerged. He climbed back onto his feet, wiped his hands on his blue jeans and then opened Jonah's door. "C'mon, it's knackered," said Myles. "We'll have to walk the rest of the way."

Jonah clicked the release on the seat belt, picked up his satchel, and jumped out of the stranded vehicle. Myles took in a deep breath, and looked around. He saw the small public playground across the road.

"Hey, you wanna go on the swings for a bit before we head home?" he asked Jonah.

Jonah thought of declining the offer, but the priest's words interrupted: It's okay to have fun and get into a little trouble sometimes, it's part of growing up.

Jonah looked up at his father. "Okay," he said with a big smile.

He held his father's hand and they crossed over to the playground.

"Ugh, everywhere I look," said Myles, "tarmac and concrete. I miss grass." Lone patches of weeds broke through the tarmac, Myles secretly rooted for them. "Hey, you know what I was saying before, about being different?" said Myles.

Jonah nodded.

"Well, it seems that you are smart, very smart in fact. After this year is over they want to put you in a special school so you don't get bored. How does that sound?"

Jonah thought for second. "Will there be others like me?" he said.

"Yep, they'll probably be older too. But that will only help you to become even smarter," Myles explained as they reached the swings.

Jonah didn't know what else to say. He let go of his father's hand and placed himself on the flexible black piece of rubber. The rubber curved around his buttocks under the weight and he grabbed onto each of the chains.

"Okay, hold on tight!" yelled Myles. He placed his large hands on his son's back, pulled him and then pushed hard.

The cooling air of the early evening flowed over Jonah's skin as he swung back and forth. The pinks and oranges of the sunset were coming more vivid.

"You okay?" Myles shouted.

"Yeah, great!" The adrenaline started to pump throughout his small body as he swung faster. "Higher!" Jonah screamed. "Higher!"

"Hold on!"

Myles pushed as hard as he could, sending Jonah perpendicular to the ground.

Jonah's grip on the chains failed. Myles watched in horror as Jonah fell back and land headfirst onto the tarmac below.

"Jonah!"

Myles ran over to his son's limp body, a pool of blood emerged and spread over the tarmac. He looked for the source and saw Jonah's head had been split open. The blood reached Myles and it soaked into his blue jeans. He screamed, "Help! Somebody help me, please!"

The feeling of dread and hopelessness overwhelmed him as it did eight years ago. Losing her child was not an option. Myles scream for help again.

A slight breeze pushed his hair, and then a voice followed.

"Don't panic."

Myles turned his head to look at the man. "Oh thank God! You need to to call an ambulance quickly!"

The man dressed in black placed a hand on Myles's shoulder. "It's already taken care of. God is with you."

IV - Strangers and Freaks

No sound could be heard, no light could be seen. Jonah floated in a black void of nothingness. A high-pitched shrill slowly grew in volume until it awoke Jonah from his slumber.

He opened his eyes. "Oh God no," he groaned while turning to look at his alarm clock.

The screen display 05:00 AM but it was not the source of the rude awakening. "Son of a bitch!" he cursed.

Jonah jumped out of bed and headed straight for the bathroom where he splashed his headache with cold water. "One of these days I'm going to give that shop alarm something worth crying about," he said to the mirror. The wind gave the building a little shake. "Every time the god damn wind picks up I have to put up with this shit!"

Jonah gave out a sigh and continued to stare at himself in the mirror. More grey had crept into his beard, and again he plucked the offending whiskers from his chin. Then he thought about his father. Was he turning grey at forty? No, he didn't show any signs of turning grey the last time he saw him. How many years had it been now? He quickly erased any thoughts of his father from his mind and returned to his bed.

Ted sat in the canteen motionless, he stared into his cup of black coffee.

"Mornin', Theodore, no paper this mornin'?" Jonah said as he entered. But no reply came. "Huh? Oh morning, Joe, lovely weather isn't it," he mocked. Silence still greeted Jonah. He poured himself a coffee then took a seat opposite Ted. He still sat there lifeless. "You okay, bud?" Jonah asked.

Ted looked up, which gave Jonah a little fright. "Whoa! Someone didn't sleep well last night," said Jonah.

Darkness surrounded Ted's bloodshot eyes and stubble covered is usually clean-shaven face.

"You look like hell, what happened?"

Ted's voice cracked, "My wife went into labour last night."

"Really? Congrats, bud."

"Please, Jonah," said Ted, "the baby, she was," he paused for moment, the words seem to be caught in his throat. "The baby was stillborn."

A few silent seconds passed as Jonah processed what he had just heard. "Ah shit, Ted! I'm so sorry"-Jonah frowned-"but then why are you here and not with your wife?"

"I just can't be at that hospital, Jonah"-Ted took in a deep breath-"Maggie was asleep when I left so she should be okay for a while."

Jonah exploded, "MORON!" The word bellowed like a clap of thunder from his lungs, his fist beat down on the table as if it carried the force of a sledgehammer. Ted trembled and looked up at him with wide-eyed fear, the grip on his mug tightened.

"What the hell are you thinking leaving her side? What if she wakes up to find herself alone?" Jonah stared at Ted awaiting an answer.

"I... I can't take it being there anymore!" Ted rose to his feet. "She looks at me as if I am the one to blame."

Jonah's presence in the room was overwhelming. "Then take the blame! If she doesn't blame you, then who else is there?" Ted looked confused and frightened. "She'll blame herself, Ted, that's who. Is that what you want?"

"Of course not!" Ted's eyes were now starting to fill with tears.

Jonah walked around the table and put his hands on Ted's upper arms as if he was going to squeeze him thinner. "Go be with your wife, Ted, she needs you. Be a husband, take all the blame. Even if it means she hates you for a while, but never leave her side. You got that?"

"Yes. You're right." Ted looked up from the floor only to see Jonah's chest. "Christ you're a lanky bastard."

"Everyone is compared to you, stumpy." Jonah lowered his hands.

"Did something like this happen to you?" asked Ted. "That was quite a surprise, your reaction."

"Something like this? Well... Maybe." A picture of his mother flashed in Jonah's mind. "Go be with your wife, I'll sort out your deliveries and explain your situation to the don."

"Cheers bud"-Ted grabbed his holdall-"you're a good friend."

"Let me know if you need anything," Jonah said as Ted left the room.

Jonah stood in the canteen alone, his hair fell in front of his face and his heart raced. The light tubes on the ceiling flickered. Jonah's head fell forward, his hands turned into fists, and the air became thick and electrified. A rumble grew into words, "Why. Must. Everyone around me, SUFFER!" his fist plunged into a metal locker next to him and the noise echoed longer than it should. Jonah drew in a huge breath, held it for a moment, felt calm re-establish, and released. "Forgive me, Ted."

One last delivery was all that was left before Jonah could relax and eat his lunch. All of Ted's deliveries were shared out between the other drivers, and this last one was one of his too. But this was also a brand new client, and finding the address was becoming an annoyance. It wasn't located in a busy industrial estate, but on a deserted country road that led nowhere. Jonah's grey van continued to pass through the never ending sea of trees, the road he drove on showed no sign of heading anywhere.

Jonah gazed to the parcel and re-read the address again for the tenth time: Nineveh Cottage, Near Enville. The trees parted and let in some sunlight for a split-second which focused his attention back to the road ahead. He almost didn't believe what he saw: A little girl stood motionless on the roadside, she looked slightly baffled, as if she'd never seen a vehicle pass down this road before. She watched as the vehicle passed by and was unmoved by the van's close proximity. Jonah checked the passenger side mirror and saw the child run off into the woods.

"Where the hell did she come from?" Jonah said. Immediately he found out as an old weather-worn sign confirmed he was entering Enville.

The woodland ceased, but now unkempt gardens and chocolate box cottages filled the landscape. He drove on and turned a corner, a huge church revealed itself from behind a row of ancient oaks. Why would a small village need such a large church? Jonah thought. He saw an opportunity to stop and get his bearings. In front of the elevated church was a large courtyard, it contained a large square of grass in the middle which was dotted with two chestnut trees. Four wooden benches faced inward from the edges and a large stone cross, two meters high, face the road. Wide yellow stone steps led up to the church's entrance with grass banks at either side. At the bottom of the steps, on the left, was a door. It was wooden, like the church's main entrance, but much smaller. Grey stone blocks outlined the frame, and grass from the bank softened the edges.

Jonah looked around searching for any signs of life, but there were none. He looked over to the wooden benches on the green. "Well, I know where I'm having lunch," he said with a smile.

He climbed out of the van and stretched out his arms, at the same time he looked up the towering church, a massive south facing stained-glass window overwhelmed his eyes. The coloured pieces of glass didn't form an image of a saint or any other religious figure like most churches. The huge arch-shaped window was a mosaic of random purples, yellows, blues, and reds. Jonah found the view beautiful. "What a waste of energy," he sighed.

"Some wasted it, others don't use enough. Which are you?"

Jonah spun around and saw a man kneeling on the ground tending a flower bed. "Oh. Hello, sir. Just thinking out loud, as you do."

"Is that so." The man slowly stood to face the visitor.

Jonah looked at the clerical collar, the golden cross dangling from his neck and decided to be polite. "It's a beautiful building, well, they always are. But I feel the energy would be better spent on buildings that weren't a place of worship for fictional beings." Fantastic job, Jonah. Showing great restraint there, an internal thought said.

The two tall figures stared at each other in silence. A breeze hit Jonah's hair, then it hit the priest's and his face grew a big grin, "Ha! Better watch yourself, son. You'll have the villagers chasing you with pitchforks." The priest squinted and he looked further into Jonah's eyes, "But, it seems that you have other things on your mind."

"Have we met before?" Jonah couldn't shake the feeling that he'd seen this scruffy white hair and beard somewhere else. This priest was not short either, only about an inch off his own height, but his slight build made him look taller than he was. If he was fat he'd look like Santa Claus, Jonah thought.

"Oh, I don't think I'd forget someone like you so quickly." The priest wiped his hands on a cloth. "So, as you've made it abundantly clear that you're not a religious man, what brings you here?"

Jonah felt the mood change. "Ah, yes. I need directions, Nineveh Cottage, do you know it?"

"I know the place, it's just outside the village, you can't miss it."

"Marvellous, thank you." Just before Jonah started to make his way back to the van he stopped in his tracks and turned back to face the priest. "Is it okay if I have my lunch here once I'm done?"

"Sure, just don't leave a mess."

"Cheers, padre!"

The priest went back to attend to his garden smiling and shaking his head, "This is gonna be fun."

Jonah jumped into the van and drove through the village to deliver his last order of the day, the darkness of this morning's events had all but disappeared.

Jonah grumbled to himself as he devoured his ham and cheese sandwich, the cold damp feeling that seeped into his trousers from the wooden bench didn't help his mood.

The priest had obviously taken some offence from my comments earlier, why else would he have sent me on that wild goose chase?

"Just outside the village, my arse," he mumbled. The address he was looking for ended up being a further seven miles down the winding country road. How is that anywhere near Enville?

A giggle came from behind a chestnut tree to Jonah's left. Jonah kept still, only moving his eyes to search for the offender. Another giggle. "I know you're there, come out with your hands up."

A small girl emerged, her arms stretched skyward, and her face wore a cheeky grin. Jonah recognised her, it was the same girl from before, the one on the roadside as he entered the village.

A typical eight-year-old girl, Jonah thought. Slight build, long blond hair, big blue eyes, and that cheeky grin.

"You got me!" she said.

"You can put your arms down now."

"What about my hands?"

Jonah thought for a second. "Well, if your hands remain in the air after you put your arms down, I'd call a doctor."

"If my hands were floating in the air, you'd call a doctor?"

Jonah took another bite of his ham and cheese sandwich, he couldn't decide if this girl was an idiot or not. "So who would you call then"-he made a gesture in the air-"if your hands detached from your arms and floated in midair?" Jonah now had his hands in the air, his fingers wriggled.

"Ummm..." Her head leaned back so she was now staring into the clear blue sky above her. A moment later her head snapped back, a movement Jonah would never dare for fear of whiplash. She looked at him seriously. "Harry Potter!" she screamed.

Jonah murmured to himself, "She's a fool alright." First the priest, now this idiot. "Hey, what's your name?"

"Mary! And you are Bearman!" The little blond girl ran rings around the wooden bench shouting, "Bearman! Bearman! Bearman!"

Jonah became instantly confused. "Bearman?" He thought about how he looked to others, never mind small children. He was actually surprised that she wasn't frightened of him. Jonah was starting to feel dizzy watching her run in circles. "What were you doing alone in the woods earlier?" he asked her.

She stopped running in circles. "Woods?"

"Yeah, I saw you, nearly hit you with my van," Jonah pointed to the vehicle.

It was Mary's turn to look confused. "I wasn't in the woods, I'm not aloud to go there on my own."

Was I seeing things? Jonah changed the subject. "Do you know the old man from this church?"

"I'm not allowed to talk to him."

"Are you aloud to do anything?"

Mary looked over to somewhere, her home maybe. "I have to go. Bye bye, Bearman!" She ran off and vanished from Jonah's view.

Well, that was weird.

With no sign of the priest's return, Jonah cleared up his mess and walked over to his mouldy grey van. Before he could open the door his phone rang into life, he looked at the caller ID, it was Ted. "Hello?" said Jonah.

"Hey, bud," Ted said.

"Hi, mate, how's everything going?"

"Could be better, but I'm hanging in there."

"You'll be alright, just don't push her, or yourself."

"She doesn't speak or do anything, she just lies there, looks at me with dead eyes."

"What did the doctors say?" Jonah asked.

"They can't do anything, there's nothing physically wrong with her, it's all in her head."

"Then just stay by her side, Ted, talk to her."

"I know... I know." Ted searched for something to say. "There wasn't too many deliveries to share out I hope."

"God no," Jonah almost laughed. "In fact, I've finished."

"Did I wake you?"

"Nope, I found a lovely little spot to hang out." Jonah punched his leg, he didn't want Ted knowing about this place, or anyone else for that matter. Not yet at least.

"Oh?" said Ted quizzically.

"You wouldn't like it, lots of tall things around, you'd feel like a Hobbit."

"Fine, keep your secrets."

"Nerd."

"Okay. Oh, how was last night?" asked Ted.

Jonah was confused, "last night?"

"Fucking hell, Jonah, did you drink that much that you can't remember?"

He tried to recall and then it hit him, "Oh the pub!"

"Did you... you know, with Sue?"

"As I said last night to you, I'd never do that, so no."

"Alright, alright, no need to take offence."

"She had a few and then I had to call her a taxi." Jonah recalled his short conversation with Sue this morning. "You should have seen her this morning, Ted."

"Why? Was she rough?"

"Not really, you know what it was like at that age. You could drink till morning then run a marathon. Sue looked at me with disappointment more than anything else."

"That's nothing new," said Ted.

"Thanks. I think she was hoping to wake up not in her own bed, so she punished me by wearing jeans and a t-shirt today."

"Ha! That's cheered me up. Okay, Jonah, I need to go."

"Go be with your wife, Ted."

"Cheers buddy. Have a good weekend."

They hung up.

Jonah turned the key in the ignition and looked at the wooden bench and area surrounding it. "Definitely my new secret spot." He forced the van into gear and drove off with the feeling that his life was finally heading on a new path.

V - It Never Rains

(25 years ago)

Jonah jogged with a person in tow. This person hadn't left his side for ten minutes now, if Jonah sprinted he sprinted, if Jonah changed direction he changed direction. But Jonah wasn't trying to lose him, he just wanted to tire him out.

The floodlights cast numerous shadows of Jonah as he moved about the pitch. The air was heavy with moisture, sweat drenched his wavy hair. He picked up the pace, forward ten metres, stop, backwards jog for five, always keeping an eye on his team mates with the ball. Jonah's tail, the opposing team's defender, was showing signs of tiredness, his breathing was laboured. After Jonah had scored his first goal of the game it was obvious the captain had told the defender to man-mark Jonah. This didn't concern him, Jonah was as fit as they come.

Jonah jogged towards the opposing half seeing that is his team-mate had the ball. He shot an arm up in the air, turned, and darted towards his target. Jonah's team-mate saw and immediately knew what to do. He gave the ball a mighty whack, sent the ball over the midfield players and over the head of Jonah and his marker. His plan had worked, the defender couldn't keep up. The ball dropped two yards in front of Jonah just outside the penalty area and the goalkeeper was now moving out, narrowing the sight on goal. None of the opposing team's defenders were in reach so Jonah bought the ball under his control and ran into the penalty area. A decision needed to be made. As the keeper made a challenge, Jonah dug his foot in and lifted the ball. With a perfectly timed jump, Jonah hurdled the helpless goalkeeper and side footed the ball into the net. Jonah punched the air above him and turned to his teammates who all cheered. Another goal by their star player.

"Brilliant! Great goal, my boy!" Myles shouted from the sideline.

Jonah turned to his dad who was applauding as he always did at his games. His father's over-eagerness had hit new heights today.

"Was that your kid scoring again?" someone asked Myles.

Myles turned to look at the man by his side, the man was well dressed and smoking a thick cigar.

"Yep," Myles said proudly, "he just seems to be getting better and better with each game."

"He's certainly a natural." The well-dressed man's eyes watched as the players kicked off again.

"Would I be correct in assuming that you're the one who set this up?" Myles asked.

"No, I'm just a spectator. But I do turn great players, like your son, into big stars." He puffed on his cigar. "Talent like that"-he nodded in Jonah's direction-"doesn't come along very often, I can assure you of that."

A linesman raised a flag, the referee's whistle blew.

"So you are here for Jonah," said Myles.

"Maybe." The man followed Jonah's movements on the pitch for a moment. "Of course I'll want to see him in action again." He pulled out a card from his trouser pocket and handed it over to Myles. "If he performs like this next week, we'll talk again."

"I like the sound of that," Myles replied. "I'll have to run it past Jonah first, of course."

"Of course."

Myles looked at the card illuminated by the huge floodlights surrounding him. "Thank you, Mr. Flemming."

"Please, call me Dan"-he held out his hand and Myles shook it-"I look forward to next week."

Dan Flemming turned away from the pitch and headed towards the parked cars, he flicked his cigar which bounced on the grass. Myles turned back to Jonah who was in the process of scoring again.

"You deserve this, my boy," Myles whispered.

Heavy drops of rain started to fall and it quickly escalated into a downpour. The pitch was already sodden from the day's earlier rain and puddles quickly developed. It became apparent to the coach in charge that today's exercise was over. He waved at the players and they all ran for the changing rooms. The spectators had already scattered for their cars for cover.

Myles caught Jonah's attention, "Hey, you looked a little slow out there today!"

"Oh ha haa, funny man. But really, how was I?"

They both had trouble seeing due to the amount of water running into their eyes from the torrent.

"Unstoppable, as usual"-he place a hand on Jonah's shoulder-"I need to talk to you about something."

"Can we do it in the car on the way home, dad? We're getting soaked!"

"Yeah, stupid me. Go get cleaned up, swamp-thing."

The car door flung open, rain poured in followed by a soggy, but now clean, Jonah. "Are we gonna be alright getting home in this rain? This car isn't exactly in its prime."

"Hey! This car is a member of our family, show some respect."

"Sorry, old gal." Jonah stroked the stained plastic dash. "So what did you need to talk about?"

"Hold on, let me get outta here first."

The rain relentlessly hammered the roof of the car, and the rough dirt track which lead to the main road now resembled a small river. The Ford Cortina bounced as Myles found deep crevasses in the track and breathed in through his teeth every time he sunk into a particularly large hole. Finally the car reached the edge of the field and Myles pulled out onto the smooth tarmac. Jonah noticed a small sigh of relief escape from his father.

"Thank God for that," Myles said. "I didn't fancy being stuck in there for hours."

"I guess not." Jonah was getting a little impatient, "So what is it?"

Myles concentrated hard on keeping the vehicle on the road. "Ah yes. You've been invited to play again," he paused.

"And?"

"If you continue to play as well as you played today, they'll want to make you an offer."

The windscreen wipers struggled to clear the rain and shuddered under the weight of the water.

"God damn rain!" Myles cursed.

"Then pull over until it stops, dad."

"I'll be fine"-he looked over to Jonah-"well, what do you think?"

"As long as I'm playing, I'm happy. And if that means earning buckets of money in the process, even bet-LOOK OUT!"

Bright light filled the interior of the car, Myles jerked the steering wheel to avoid the oncoming truck, but it only sent his Cortina into a spin. The truck connected with the car's rear side, spinning the car in the opposite direction until a wheel caught a tree stump on the grass verge. The Cortina flipped over and over and came to a rest hugging a tree.

The wipers continued to stroke the shattered screen, the one working headlight shined pointlessly into a neighbouring field, and steam escaped from under the bonnet. The engine was dead.

Jonah opened his eyes and looked over to his father, but he wasn't there. Was he thrown from the car? The driver's seat was now occupied by mangled metal, there was no room to fit a person there. Jonah came to the realisation that he couldn't move, the Cortina had formed around him only giving him enough space to breathe.

"DAD?!"

Rain still fell, but Jonah no longer had shelter from it. The passenger door window had disintegrated into tiny diamond pieces that were now spread in all directions. The one working headlight failed and darkness fell, Jonah was starting to feel frightened.

"Dad? Please help!"

Jonah started to feel something else, this feeling chilled him to the bones. He tried to move only to be met with unimaginable pain. Jonah tried to look around, but it was too dark. Jonah tried to reach his legs, but he was confined too tightly. Jonah tried not to panic, but the pain in his legs was too severe.

VI - Friends and Acquaintances

A silhouette of a large hairy man stood at a window in front of the low morning sun. He grumbled, "Noisy bastards."

The rubbish collectors continued to throw around the plastic bins, making too much noise. At a press of a big red button on the big yellow truck, the bins were lifted into the air, flipped, emptied, and laid back down on the ground in one smooth action creating even louder noises.

The weekend had dragged on and on no matter what he did to fill the time. He played video games, watched movies and TV. Maybe he should have gone outside now that he thought about it.

"It must be Monday." Jonah looked at his alarm clock, it signalled to him to wake up. "You, my friend, are becoming of no use to me." Jonah turned off the alarm and then opened a drawer and reached for some underwear.

"Wow, you look like shit," said Ted as Jonah sipped at his coffee. He pulled out a seat and sat opposite the tired looking man. A fluorescent light flickered and the canteen seemed more yellow and dank than usual.

"Morning, Theodore." He gave Ted a serious look. "How is she? And you?"

Ted took in a deep breath. "She's... okay, I think. She doesn't say much but I help out as much as I can."

"Stick with it, mate," said Jonah, "you'll both be stronger for it in the end."

"Maybe."

There was a moment of silence before one of them spoke again.

"You're not back here to work are you?" asked Jonah.

"God no," said Ted, "just showing my face and giving them a rough idea of how long I'll be off."

"They being dicks?"

"Surprisingly no, but I do have to take this time as holiday."

"Sounds about right," confirmed Jonah.

Ted held out a hand, "Jonah, thank you."

Jonah shook it, "Anytime, Ted. You have my number if you wanna chat."

Ted let go of Jonah's hand, "God, we're like a couple of girls."

"Then we'll go for a beer instead," Jonah offered.

"Sounds good," said Ted. "So," he paused, not knowing whether or not to poke the bear. "Why do you look like shit?" A smirk crept across Ted's face.

Jonah looked down at his coffee on the table, his long scruffy dark hair hung down by his equally scruffy beard, and then slowly he rolled his eyes upwards to look at Ted with menace.

Ted turned white. A few seconds passed which felt like an eternity.

Jonah finally smiled, "Why so serious?"

"You asshole!" Ted said with relief. "Do you know how scary you look? You look like Jesus fucking Christ jacked up on steroids who's been homeless for a month!"

"I was rudely awoken by the dustmen," explained Jonah.

"Well get an early night then... and a hair brush."

Jonah continued, "You should cut down on your porklife, mate, get some exercise."

Ted squinted, "Why do I get the feeling you're still fucking with me?"

Jonah added a cockney twang to his speech, "I feed the pigeons, I sometimes feed the sparrows too. It gives me a sense of enormous well-being."

Ted sighed, "Dickhead, don't you have work to do?"

"I'm not exactly rushed off my feet ya know."

"Well don't make it too obvious or I might find myself not returning at all."

Jonah thought about this. "Shit, you're right." He continued to sit.

"Sue?" a head emerged from behind the bathroom door. It hovered there like a cheap magic trick.

Sue looked to see where the voice came from and saw him. "Oh hey, you!" Her blood pumped harder.

"Are you alone?" whispered Jonah.

Sue checked the stalls. "Looks like it, no one here with their knickers around their ankles"-she gave Jonah a look-"but there could be," she winked.

Jonah pretended to play dumb, "I need a favour."

"I'm sure we could come to an arrangement."

Jonah's head was still the only part of him that was visible to Sue.

"Would you come in here!" she said.

"Into the ladies'?"

"Yes."

"What if someone comes in?"

"What if someone sees you like that? Peeking into the ladies room."

Jonah thought for a second and then entered. The restroom was small, dimly lit and only had two stalls, an A3 size mirror hung on the wall above a small stained sink. It was cheap and the bear minimum required by law, but at least it didn't smell like the mens did. Jonah took up a lot of room and found himself a little too close to Sue than he'd like. Sue's dress today was tight and Jonah found it difficult not to stare.

"You like it?" said Sue, "thought you might."

He could smell her hair, fruity and easy on the nose. "It's lovely," Jonah said, "but the favour?"

"Ah, yes. What is it, big boy?"

"The Nineveh delivery."

"Yep," Sue started applying red lipstick.

"I can do it even when Ted returns."

"Really?"

"It's on my way back to the office," Jonah explained.

Sue finish applying and smeared her lips together. "What's in it for you?" she placed her hands on her hips.

"What? Nothing!"

"I don't believe you," said Sue.

"It's the truth, and it's nice to get out in the countryside once in awhile." Jonah stared into her eyes.

Sue felt herself get a little hot. "Fine, but you have to do something for me."

Jonah was not sure he liked where this was going, but he played along. He stepped closer to her and she breathed a little heavier getting more excited. Sue's tight dress was low cut and Jonah could see too much, his blood started to pump harder also.

His voice was deep, "What do you want?" Jonah asked.

Sue put her hands on his chest and felt his pounding heart, "A date, this Friday."

"I look forward to it," he said with a smile.

Jonah would be driving on Friday for their date of course, last thing he needed was for Sue to get him drunk so she could have her way with him.

All for a delivery? You are losing it, old man.

The thought of losing the Nineveh delivery annoyed Jonah, it made him feel... uncomfortable.

The sun blinded Jonah as the trees cleared, he focused his attention back to where he was and to where he was going. All the stress he was harbouring drained away as he drove into Enville, he felt he belonged here.

He pulled over and parked in the shadow of the huge church, the last place he thought that he would feel at peace. The plan was to sit on the bench, eat, soak in the country fresh air and bird song, and then take a gentle walk to explore the village a little more.

Jonah sat and placed his plastic lunch box next to him on the bench, but didn't open it. He was being watched. He raised himself and nonchalantly walked over to the nearby tree.

"Mary had a little lamb," he said. Jonah heard a giggle. "Its fleece was white as snow." He paused, looking for movement before raising his voice, "But then a BEARMAN ate little Mary!"

Mary jumped out.

"And spat out all her bones!" With his arms raised, Jonah let out a bear-like growl. Mary screamed and ran with Jonah in tow. They circled the tree several times before Jonah stopped and gasped for air. "Okay, Mary, I'm done and a bit dizzy," he started walking to the bench. "I'm gonna sit and eat."

"Fatty, fatty, Bearman!" she sang. Mary skipped along beside him unfazed by the exercise.

"Fatty? That's very rude, shorty."

Mary didn't say anything, she just giggled and gave Jonah that cheeky smile. After Jonah seated himself she continued to skip, circling the bench.

"You're making me dizzy again, young miss." Jonah removed the cheese and ham sandwich from the lunch box and took a huge bite. He grabbed at his drink, but it wasn't there.

"Hey, Mary," Jonah said, "could you skip over to my van and grab the bottle of pop on the seat?"

She stopped in her tracks and stared at him.

"Please?" added Jonah.

"Okay!" Mary bounced to the van while Jonah continued to eat.

He looked around until his eyes followed a straight path which met the small wooden door next the stone steps. The door was again closed.

A storeroom maybe?

Jonah's eyes followed the stone steps leading to the church's entrance.

Never look backwards or you'll fall down the stairs.

Above the entrance the huge stained-glass window's beauty still dominated the structure.

Is there something different about you today?

"Here's you drink!"

Jonah snapped back to reality and stared at the girl holding something that wasn't his drink. "Are you trying to be funny, little girl?" It was not apple & blackcurrant squash like he had hoped, but diesel engine oil instead. "I have to put this in my van everyday to keep it from breaking," said Jonah.

"Wrong bottle?"

"Wrong bottle," Jonah confirmed.

Again, Mary skipped away. His thoughts returned to the church and then to the priest.

Are you going to hide today, old man, after tricking me?

Jonah looked at his watch, "Good, plenty of time."

Out of sight, the priest watched Jonah and Mary run around in circles. "Really, Jonah, chasing little girls at your age. You should be ashamed." The priest didn't move, even when Jonah looked up in his direction, he knew he couldn't be seen. He watched Mary run to the van and back to Jonah a few times. "What are you doing?" His eyes narrowed. "Well whatever, you can play with her for now. But I do have a much better playmate in mind."

"Who's she?" asked Mary.

Jonah looked and examined the birthday card in her hands. "Give me that!" he swiped the card from her grip.

"Is that your girlfriend? She's very pretty."

"That is none of your business," said Jonah, "and you still haven't fetched that drink."

Mary sang, "Bearman has a girlfriend, Bearman has a girlfriend!"

Jonah sighed, stood up, and strolled over to the van. He grabbed the bottle of squash, which was in plain view on the passenger seat, and took a hefty swig. Mary was still singing the taunt, spinning on the spot, hands raised in the air reaching at nothing. Jonah called to her, "Mary!"

She continued to spin.

"I'm heading up to the church, do you want to join me?"

She stopped with her back to Jonah. "I'm not aloud!"

"Okay, I don't know how long I'll be, but you can wait for me if you want."

Mary turned to face him, "I better go." She ran off waving a hand in the air, "bye, bye, Bearman!" She disappeared down a narrow road just wide enough for vehicles.

Jonah scratched his head, "Well that was odd." He turned to face the church and looked up. "Let's see if you're in, old man, I need to ask you something."

No one had answered his thunderous knocking on the great wooden door and so Jonah decided to circle the building in search for an alternate entrance. Old graves surrounded the church, Jonah stopped a few times to read the inscriptions on the rain worn stones, this last one was only just legible: A part of you will always be alive in me.

"Until you die at least."

"Do you specialise in the inappropriate, Jonah?"

Jonah looked for the priest and found him behind a grave stone, kneeling on the floor tending a flower bed.

"Oh, hello again. I didn't expect to see you there, kneeling before me," Jonah smirked.

"A little below the belt, don't you think? But then again, you don't get much action down there now, do ya." The priest raised his head, looked up at the large man, and gave him a cheeky grin.

"Does everyone in this village have a cheeky smile? Plus how do you know how much action I get?"

"I don't, of course. But I do know that a beard and hair like that doesn't exactly say I'm ready and waiting ladies!"

The priest put a hand on top of the grave stone and lifted himself, he removed his gardening gloves and floppy hat. White hair exploded out in all directions. Jonah held in a laugh.

"Shut up," the priest knew he looked ridiculous, he patted away grass off the hat. "Your hair isn't much better."

"The church is shading you, why the hat?" Before the priest could answer, Jonah continued, "Wait, how did you know who I was before you looked up?""

"How did you know I was me before I looked up."

"Oh, you want to play? No problem," Jonah seemed to be enjoying himself, "The black dress-"

"Robes"

"-The huge cross dangling down your back," Jonah said. "Was it getting in your way when you were gardening?"

"Ah," the priest awkwardly swung the cross back to where it belonged. "A bit of a give-a-way."

"Just a tad," it was time for Jonah to get an answer. "So?"

"I saw you playing kiss chase with the Smith girl when I was on the other side of the church earlier," the priest explained. "And I simply forgot I had the hat on, which answers your other question."

"Well please put it back on. I'm about to piss my pants... That hair, it's awesome."

"Okay, okay, you've had your fun," he placed the hat back on his head and tucked his hair in. They started to walk.

Jonah's voice turned a little more serious, "How did you know my name?"

"Wow, you're dumber than you look," said the priest. "Wash your van."

"What?"

"Jonah, please clean me!" he stated. "I think someone is trying to tell you something."

Jonah thought for a second. "God damn it!" he couldn't believe he missed that.

"You say that in front of me again and I'll put you on your arse, understood?"

Jonah saw the seriousness on the priest's face. "Sorry, I bit my tongue."

The priest almost laughed, "This is too easy." He held out a hand, "The name's Gregory, Father Gregory."

Jonah admitted defeat and sighed, "Jonah Burns," he shook his hand. "So, Father Greg, where's Dougal at?"

"OH I get it! Father Greg sounds like Father Ted," Gregory explained. "You'll have to do better than that, Mr Burns. Try pulling Smithers from your arse, maybe he could do better."

Jonah realised how bad of a joke he made and tried to change the subject. "You seem to watch a lot of TV for a priest," said Jonah.

"Just because I'm a man of God, that doesn't mean I have to live in the stone age, TVs are permitted, you know."

During their conversation, Gregory had led them back to the front of the church and into the sunshine. He leant on a wall which ran parallel with the front side of the church, he looked down to the green square below. Jonah walked past the priest and lent on the wall the other side of the gap where the steps came to an end. The two tall men looked like gargoyles, guarding the church from anything that didn't belong.

Gregory broke the silence, "I saw you staring up here earlier, when you were eating."

"You were watching me?"

"That's what I do."

"Do you peep on people often?"

Gregory sighed, "Of course not, I was here before you arrived in that dustbin you call a van. I was just wondering what you were looking at."

Jonah turned and looked up at the window. "That, it's mesmerising. I was thinking it must look spectacular when the sunlight shines through it." Now that Jonah was closer the window looked even larger. "Any chance of taking a look inside, Father?"

"Ah, I don't have the keys on me, they're at home. But if you are around tomorrow I'll make sure to have them with me, I have plenty of gardening to do so I'll be here."

"You have another home?" then Jonah thought of something, "Oh wait, that door at the bottom of the step-"

"You don't think I live in there do you, boy?"

"Well..."

"Ha!"-Gregory pushed himself off the wall-"That's brilliant!"

"Okay, take it easy before you bust a lung." Jonah couldn't hide his embarrassment, "I'll be here tomorrow, thank you."

Gregory calmed down, "It's a date."

Jonah glanced at his watch, "I have to go. It was nice to meet you, Father Greg. See you tomorrow," they shook hands.

"It was a pleasure, Jonah. But before you go, let me give you a little advice."

"What, you want to mess with me some more?"

"No, this is serious," Gregory's face was completely unreadable. "If I were you, I'd keep my distance from Mary Smith, she's dangerous."

Part 2

The Lady's Man

VII - Blackout

(20 years ago)

"Happy birthday, buttmunch!"

"Thank you, Mark, fart knocker," Jonah downed his pint and the other three copied.

Four empty pint glasses thumped down on the grimy, wooden table. Ugly Kid Joe began another rendition of Everything About You, its fifth repetition of the night. "Are you fucking kidding me?" Jonah said. He looked to where the jukebox stood in the corner, the neon lights just visible through the choking cigarette smoke. "How many times have I got to listen to this shit tonight?"

"As many times as I tell it," Mark answered.

"This is your doing?" Lukas asked.

"Who cares! As long as it's not Arrested Development and Mr. Fucking Wendal," said John.

All four of them laughed and cheered in agreement. This was how Jonah liked to spend his birthdays, not with family members pretending to like them, but with real friends who he saw on a regular basis and were fun to be with.

The location was perfect too, The Queen's Head, a short walk from his house. It wasn't a god awful hall rented in a hotel with a talentless band playing, or worse yet, a fucking DJ. It was his local. It was dark, it was smoky, it smelled, it had atmosphere. It was perfect.

Mark was his closest friend and they had been since the first day of high school when they were sat next to each other. Lukas and John however were fairly new additions, they worked with Jonah, and Jonah soon found that they were perfect drinking buddies.

"More beer!" Mark demanded. He stood, fingered the empty glasses, and made for the bar.

John pulled out his wallet quickly. "Mark, wait!"

Mark halted.

"Here, get a round of JDs as well." John tried to hand him a ten pound note.

"You get em' you lazy bastard," said Mark. "I have my fuckin' hands full, are you blind?"

"Jesus fucking Christ"-John stood up-"fine."

The two remaining watched them walk towards the bar, then Lukas leaned over to Jonah. "They look like a couple of praying mantises, don't they?"

"Ha, yeah!" Jonah snorted. "Mark eats like a fuckin' pig and never puts on an ounce. It pisses me off actually."

"Oh come on," said Lukas. "Are you saying you think you're fat?"

"What? No! Do I sound like a woman to you?"

"Well, you are Mark's bitch!"

"Oh, so it is crushed skull you're looking for."

Lukas held up his hands. "Easy there, grizzly bear. I ain't messin' with no brick shit house."

A second of silence passed before Jonah bust out laughing. "God damn it, Lukas, when you say shit like that I remember you're black."

"Hey! You chattin' up my woman?" Mark placed the full pint glasses on the table.

"Damn that was fast," Lukas said.

"Helps to keep that piece of ass behind the bar in good working order, if you know what I mean."

"You didn't," Jonah said.

Mark took a sip of his beer and let out a satisfying ahhhh. "Now that would be telling."

"You're full of shit," Lukas said.

Jonah grinned. "Jealous, are we?"

"You know what? Fuck y'all." Lukas now took a large gulp of his drink and burped. "As far as I'm concerned, I'm the only one here equipped well enough to please a woman."

Mark and Jonah's eyes were drawn to Lukas's crotch.

"Hey!" Lukas protested. "If you want hookin' up, my bitches, I know some brother fuckers!" Lukas's attention was diverted directly behind Jonah. "Uh-oh."

"What is it?" Jonah asked.

Before Lukas could answer, a voice whispered in Jonah's ear. "It's time for your demise."

Jonah shot his head around to see John's face too close for comfort. "God damn it, John!"

John grinned as he lifted four shot glasses into view. "Here we go, boys. This is where the evening gets serious." He gave a glass to each of his friends and took a seat before raising his glass. "To Jonah, no longer a teenager!"

They all downed their shots then Mark added, "And by the end of the night, hopefully, no longer a virgin!"

Dave and Lukas cheered, "Here, here!"

"Thank you, and fuck you," Jonah retorted. He pulled out his wallet and slapped a tenner on the table. "Somebody get more!"

"Good show, old man," John said. He grabbed the money, steadied himself, and headed to the bar.

Jonah watched him. "Is he drunk already?"

"No surprise really," said Mark. "He's all skin and bones... Or a woman." He took a sip of beer before continuing, "So how is the old ball n' chain doin'?

Jonah's eyes narrowed. "Mattie?"

"No, Lukas's hand."

"Hey!" Lukas protested.

"Yes, dumbass, Mattie."

"We've never been better. Why?"

"Oh, no reason." Mark tried to look innocent.

Jonah became suspicious. "Mark. Why?"

"Well, you can be a miserable cunt sometimes ya know."

"Not this again."

"Oh, come on! You act like the whole world is against you."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

Lukas mockingly shifted his head side to side as each one spoke. He was smiling a wild smile like it was the best tennis match he had ever seen.

Mark kept on pressing Jonah, "Yes you do."

"Kiss my ass."

"Which cheek?"

"You'll be kissing my fist in a minute."

"Why you gotta hurt me so bad?"

"Go on, keep pushing."

"You know this pillow talk turns me on."

"That's it, time to bring the pain."

Lukas's curiosity got the better of him. "Whoa whoa whoa, am I missing something?"

Jonah gave Mark a stare.

"Here you go gentlemen!" John had returned with another round of JDs.

"Jonah was just about to tell us why he's such a misery ass sometimes," Lukas explained.

Jonah gave in. "Fine. Mark, go ahead."

Mark took in a massive breath through his teeth before speaking. "His mother died in childbirth, he fell off a swing cracking his skull open which somehow stopped him from being a genius. Exhibit A," Mark motioned at Jonah. Jonah complied and parted his hair on the top of his head to one side and revealed a huge scar. John and Lukas both winced.

Mark continued, "Then five years ago he was in a car accident which damaged his legs, preventing him from playing footy for Aston Villa. Jonah's dad blames himself and is now a drunk, and on top of that Jonah has a tiny penis. Did I miss anything?."

"That's about it. And I'm hung like an elephant, you bastard."

"Well sheeeit," Lukas said. "You need to stop living in the past, my friend."

"Is that so," Jonah said.

"You have a great job," said Lukas. "A beautiful white girl with a tight white ass, and if you keep moping around, you're gonna lose one."

"Easier said than done," Jonah said into his pint.

John broke his silence, "Shut up and let's drink. Y'all being too serious."

Lukas looked at John with wide-eyed anger. "Y'all? You think you a black motherfucker, muthafucka?!"

Jonah and Mark let John's arse tighten up for a few seconds before they burst out laughing. Lukas joined in which relaxed John and he finally saw the funny side. They all picked up their shot glasses and downed the brown liquid.

"Nothin' like a serious drink to lighten the mood, hey fellas?" Mark said. He wiped his mouth with his arm.

A high pitched voice yelled from the direction of the bar, "Hey, Mark!"

"What's up?" he answered.

"Phone!"

"Okay!"-Mark stood up-"I'll see you ladies in a minute."

"Who's phoning you here?" asked John.

"Oh gee, let me just use The fuckin' Force to find out." Mark put his fingers to his temples and closed his eyes tight, then opened them again. "Oh wait, I'm not a fuckin' JEDI!" He slapped John on the head and walked off.

John rubbed his temple with his palm. "Can Jedi even read minds?"

Jonah shook his head.

"I'm gonna give him such a pounding one day," said John.

"Now, when you say pounding, you mean-"

"Using my fist, Jonah, you fucking homo."

"Oh, fisting is your thing?" Lukas said.

John's patients was beginning to crack. "Fuck you. Both of you."

They all laughed and continued to drink.

Mark returned but he didn't sit down. "Sorry Jonah, I have to go."

"Where? It's only nine thirty!"

"Keep your pants on, I'll be back."

"Okay, but where are you going?"

"To my sister's, she had a fight with Derek again and I need to calm her down."

Lukas interrupted, "Shit, that bitch be crazy."

"Hey!" Mark protested. But then he thought for a second. "No, you're right, she is." Mark put a hand on Jonah's shoulder, "I'll be an hour, tops. Have a pint ready for my return."

Jonah raised an eyebrow. "For your return? Are you going on a fuckin' quest or something?"

Mark placed his fists on his hips and tried to do a Superman pose. "The mighty Mark is needed!" He left the pub while his friends covered their faces with embarrassment.

"Fuckin twat," Jonah said.

"Seriously, what the fuck?" John added.

"He does have his moments of madness." Jonah collected the empty glasses. "My round boys!"

"Fuck it! I'm going home." Jonah stood up with military precision.

"Dude!" Lukas raised his hand and wanted to add to his statement, but nothing else came from his mouth.

"Fuckin' light weights," said Jonah. "Can't even handle a bottle of JD between us."

"Well, the resh of us aren't over shix foot tall and fifty stone," John slurred.

"Fifty stone? Jesus, how fat do you think I am? I'm going home, I hate working hungover." Jonah grabbed his coat from off the back of the chair, threw it around, and inserted his arms effortlessly. "Tell that twat, Mark, he's a cunt."

John replied, "It hasn't been an hour yet, man!"

"Forty five minutes is long enough, I want to be sober for my special birthday treat off Mattie."

Lukas smacked his hands together, his eyes were barely open. "Hells yeah!"

Jonah walked around the table until he was between his two friends and placed a hand on each of their shoulders. "Thank you for coming out tonight, seriously, it means a lot."

"Shit, don't get all wet on us"-Lukas nodded to John-"he might just fall for y'all."

Jonah leaned closer to John and puckered up. John tried to resist but Jonah wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close.

"God damn it Jo-"

"C'on, just one kiss."

Lukas watched on in amusement. "Yeah, go on, John, just a quick snog."

Jonah backed off. "Okay, I think I've teased you enough for one night." He raised himself, towering over the two. "I'll see you guys bright and early, no excuses."

"No probs, my man. Just don't stay up too late doin' the nasty to Mattie," said Lukas.

Jonah raised his arm in acknowledgement as he reached the door and left the pub.

The night sky was clear which gave the air a chill. Jonah zipped up his jacket, shoved his hands into the pockets and started to walk. He crossed the road and headed into a dimly lit, narrow alleyway that lay between two semi-detached houses. Wooden panel fences on either side lined the alley, overgrown bushes and trees pushed the fences out not wanting to be confined to their borders. Concrete lampposts towered up in regular intervals, the dirty lamps overhead gave everything a spray-tanned orange glow and a slight buzzing could be heard from a nearby lamppost cavity. Fallen twigs, broken glass, food wrappers, dog mess, and what appeared to be a used condom littered the ground which made Jonah sigh and scrunch his face in disgust.

Jonah looked down the alley and saw his home in the distance. He stopped in his tracks. A bright white light shone above his door, the security lamp had been triggered. "Damn cats," Jonah moaned. He continued on.

Halfway down the alley he noticed two people standing in the doorway of his house, Jonah stopped once more. They were kissing. Mattie was standing in the doorway looking down at the man on the step below her, the man raised his hand and ran it through her long brown hair. She smiled.

"What the hell?" Joan muttered.

The man lowered his hand, Mattie leaned down and they kissed once more. Jonah was now taking backwards steps away from this nightmare. Mattie turned, entered the house, and closed the door. The man turned to the alley. It was Mark, his friend. Jonah hid himself in the shadows while his mind conjured up pictures of his best friend and Mattie together.

Why? We've been friends all this time! How long has this been going on? How could he do this to me?

How did you not see this coming, dumbass.

What?

It was pretty obvious if you ask me.

Who are you?

Ha ha ha, like you don't know.

I don't!

Just enjoy the ride, it's about to get interesting.

The sound of Mark's footsteps were getting louder. Jonah's eyes widened, his blood pumped faster.

What are you talking about?

The steps continued to grow closer, a twig snapped under Mark's foot.

Playtime!

Jonah became calm, his face expressionless. He lost himself, blacked out, became someone else, a monster maybe. Whatever it was, his friend was about to find out.

Jonah stepped out into the orange light and Mark jumped in surprise. "Jonah? Is that you?"

He didn't speak. Something buzzed in the lamppost cavity and the orange glow from the overhead lamp flickered which made Mark looked up. Two fists struck Mark's sternum simultaneously. Something cracked and the air in his lungs emptied as he fell to his knees struggling to breathe. The orange light continued to flicker.

"Please Jonah," Mark said when he found a breath. His speech horse, "Nothing happened, I swear!"

Jonah stepped forward and as he passed Mark he grabbed the back of his collar.

Jonah's voice was deep, and dark, "Let's go ask Mattie, shall we?"

Jonah dragged Mark effortlessly through the mess and litter like a sack of potatoes. Mark tried to break free, but he was too weak. They left the alley and Jonah continued to his front door not caring about the curbs and Mark's limbs hitting them as he crossed the road. Mark continued to try and loosen Jonah's grip on him, but it was hopeless. Jonah pounded on his front door and waited.

The door opened.

"I told you Mar-" Mattie's face drain of colour when she saw Jonah's face, she looked at what he was gripping. "Oh my God, what happened?"

Jonah entered the house, dragging Mark up the step with him.

"Jonah?" Mattie looked down at the step, the security light highlighted the blood from Mark's asphalt worn leg. She grabbed the phone on the table next to the door, but Jonah quickly let go of Mark and clamped his hand around her wrist. Mattie gave out a yelp. He reached over with his other hand, pried the receiver from her grip, and placed it back on the table. Tears were beginning to well in Mattie's eyes as Jonah placed his hand on the back of her head, the other still gripping the wrist. He moved her closer to him almost nose to nose. He stared into the eyes of the woman he loved, she looked up at him, her head was at an uncomfortable angle.

Jonah's voice grumbled, "You've upset me, whore."

Mattie looked into Jonah's lifeless eyes. "Why?" she squeaked.

"Don't you lay a finger on her!" Mark's breathing still hurt him.

Jonah let Mattie go, her knees gave way and she dropped to the floor terrified. He turned his head to Mark and smirked. Mark looked back in confusion.

"I'm going to make you remember this day for the rest of your lives," said Jonah.

Jonah returned his attention to Mattie, but before she could say a word Jonah thrust his knee into her face, a sickening crack came from her nose and she fell limp onto the floor.

"You bastard!" screamed Mark.

Jonah turned to him, grabbed his shirt with both hands and lifted him until their eyes were level. Mark tried to reach the floor with his toes.

"You're going pay for betraying me." Jonah crashed his head into Mark's and then let the body drop to the ground.

The sky was awash of blue, purple, pink, and orange as the sun drew closer to the horizon. Jonah's mind was a blur as he look at the sky from a wooden bench in a nearby park.

What the hell happened?

Don't worry about it.

Something's not right.

Something was wrong, and I made it right.

Why do I get the feeling that's bullshit?

As I said, don't worry about it.

Jonah made his way back to his house and watched on, out of sight, as the paramedics carried out the victims. The police entered the property as Mark and Mattie were each placed into their own ambulance clutching their wrists with a pained look, their faces bloodied. The police were now rummaging through bins and searching the area for something and someone.

Jonah then realised his was clutching something and opened his hand. The bloodied ring fingers of the victims lay in his palm. Jonah took in a deep breath, popped the fingers in the bin next to him and walked in the opposite direction towards the police station.

VIII - Triple Trouble

Jonah stared up at the ceiling and watched it bow under the weight of his upstairs neighbour. Her footstep pounded away and back again as if she was running around trying to stamp on a mouse. "Fat fuck," he said as he threw back the covers and climbed out of bed. Jonah reached for the curtains and whipped them apart, the morning sun shone on his naked body and he smiled. "Glorious day. I might actually enjoy going to work for once." He thought of Enville; it made him happy.

Jonah rummaged in the back of his van as he organised his deliveries. He couldn't read the labels very well as the van's interior light didn't work, and that annoyed him. It hurt his back having to hunch over in the small space and thought about how lucky Ted was for being so short, but he changed his mind quickly and shook the thought away. A lot of things didn't work on the van, it needed constant checking over and the management had no interest in fixing the problems unless it made the vehicle unlawful to drive. Jonah thought about sabotaging the van somehow as he threw a box into the corner. The contents rattled and protested, he made a face knowing he shouldn't have done that.

"Oh Jonah!" called a girlish voice.

"Sue?" replied Jonah.

"I'm coming in."

"Wait! I'll come out."

The van dipped slightly.

"Too late." Sue wrapped her arms around him, her breasts pressed against his back and Jonah felt her warmth.

"Oh, hey there!" Jonah began to sweat a little.

"I can't wait until Friday." She squeezed a little tighter.

"Oh, nor can I!" Jonah laughed nervously.

"You're gonna have to help me get through the week though."

Jonah shivered. "What do you mean by that?"

"Well..." She grabbed his hand and placed it on the small of his back, palm out. Jonah felt the warmth of her skin and her belly button.

"Please tell me you're not naked," Jonah said.

Sue crouched down further, his hand cupped a breast. "Wow, you have big hands," she said.

"Sue!"

"Okay, big boy, I think I've teased you enough, I've got my fix for the day." She let him go. "Don't turn around just yet."

"And why would I do that?"

Sue sighed, "You dick."

"What?"

"Any man would give his right nut to get a look at these, and you had to be a jerk and say that."

"I didn't mean it like that, Sue."

"You can turn around now."

Jonah cautiously turned and saw that she had indeed finished putting on her top. She placed her hand on his cheek, "I hope you learn how to talk to women by Friday." She gave him a quick kiss on the lips and jumped out leaving Jonah dumbfounded and alone in the dimly lit van.

It's different.

Jonah stared at the stained-glass window which dominated the south facing wall of the church.

Is it?

The colours and shapes still looked random, but less so. The sun shone again today which lit up the glass and saturated the colours. He became lost in the shapes, the colours started to swirl, memories of women fluttered in his mind.

A child called out, "Jobah!"

Jonah returned to himself and saw Mary running towards him. Her run looked out of control, arms flailed and he didn't think she was going to stop in time, but she did, and in a way that would dislocate knees if Jonah attempted it.

"Look, little girl, my name is Jonah, with an n. Saying it with a b like an infant doesn't make you seem cute."

"Sorwey, Bwearman," she continued the cute act.

Jonah turned his attention back to the window. "You see that window there?"-he pointed up to the church-"Has it always looked like that, or does it change from time to time?"

Mary looked confused, "Ummm."

Jonah gave her a second until he realised it was useless. "Never mind, we wouldn't want you to hurt yourself, would we."

"So this must be the Beardman," said a voice.

Jonah snapped his head to the left. A slender, blond-haired (real blond) woman stood over him, the sun behind her hurt his eyes. "Beardman?" he questioned.

"No, it's Bearman, auntie!" Mary shouted.

"Auntie?"

"This is my Auntie Jenny!"

"Oh, hi. It's Jonah actually," he offered his hand.

"I see." She put her hands on her hips, her green eyes glared at him. "And what are your intentions towards my niece, exactly?"

"What? No!"

Mary jumped onto Jonah's back, "Intentions! Intentions! Intentions!" He jumped to his feet while Mary was still attached and she yelled out, "Weeeeeee!"

"I'm just messing with you, Jonah"-Jenny relaxed her pose-"she obviously likes you."

"I think I'm just a plaything to her," Jonah sighed.

Mary wrapped her arms around his neck and let her body relax and dangle. Jonah started gagging, "Mary, you're choking me!"

Jenny let out a little laugh and Jonah tried to smile. Mary pulled herself up a little and wrapped her legs around Jonah's midriff, he clamped onto them with the inside of his arms so the weight was lifted off his neck. Mary was now officially getting a piggy back ride.

"Nice to finally meet you." Jenny reached and grabbed his hand and gave it a little shake. Her hands were soft and small, the top of her head only reached his chest.

"Bearman! Walk!" Mary ordered.

"Alright, alright, Miss Bossy." He slowly walked towards the church and Jenny followed at Jonah's side. He quickly noticed she wasn't wearing any shoes. "Do you always walk around barefoot?"

"Only on grass," she said, "I love how it feels on my feet."

"Ah yes, I know what you mean."

"So what brought you to Enville, Jonah?"

He gave a little thought to his answer, "Unfortunate circumstances and luck I guess."

"And to hit on little girls," Jenny added.

"Very funny. But no, a colleague had to go home sick, I did a delivery for him that took me through this place." He looked at Jenny, she wore a yellowish light summer dress which complemented her slim figure. Also Jenny was either was wearing very little makeup or she wore non at all, Jonah had always preferred the natural look. 'Nothing worse than a woman with a plastic doll-face and a complexion of an Umpa-Lumpa,' he use to say. Jenny looked like an adult version of Mary, Jonah guessed that Jenny and her sister looked a lot alike.

Jonah continued, "This green looked so peaceful I just had to stop and have my lunch, and I've been coming here ever since." He paused for a few seconds. "So how long have you lived here?"

"Oh, for as long as I can remember. Our house has been in the family for generations, it will be passed on down to Mary eventually." Jenny looked at Jonah, "It can get a little boring though."

"But it's quiet," Jonah stated, "I'd give anything for quiet right now."

"I better keep her away then!" she nodded at Mary. Mary was busy pretending to be riding a horse, she bounced as Jonah walked and made 'clip-clop' noises.

"She's fine, it's the kind of noise that wakes you every morning and boils your blood that's eating at me."

"Oh," Jenny said.

"No! Not that, I live alone," he explained. "Upstairs neighbours bouncing around and dustbin collections and alarm systems." And the nightmares, Jonah thought to himself.

"Sound horrific."

"Why did that sound like sarcasm?"

Jenny said it again with feeling, "Sounds horrific!"

"I'm surrounded by comedians!" he laughed. "Mary's not too bad. It's nice to goof around occasionally."

"Since Mary enjoys your company, I guess it's fine."

"Oh, I didn't realise I needed your permission," Jonah tried to joke.

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"Sorry."

"Wow, you are too easy." Jenny smiled again.

Jonah started to feel annoyed at being easily teased, but after a few minutes of idle chit-chat he relaxed a enjoyed Jenny's company. They reached the end of the green, stopped and faced each other.

Jenny looked at Mary, "Well I never."

"What?"

"She fell asleep... and she's drooling." She giggled which Jonah found cute.

Mary's head rested on his large shoulder, a trail of saliva oozed its way down Jonah's light grey t-shirt. "Oh nice," he groaned.

"What's the matter? Allergic to a little girl's drool, are we?"

"Ha ha, you're a funny woman!"

"She sure has taken to you." Jenny stepped behind Jonah and lifted Mary off his back. Mary wrapped her arms around her aunt and continues to doze. "Damn you've gotten heavy, girl." She looked at Jonah, "I hope you don't have this effect on all women, young man. You might find my drool on you next time." She turned away and walked towards the other end of the green, "See you tomorrow?"

Jonah was a little surprised. "Ummm, yeah, sure!" Again he found himself left alone and dumbfounded.

Sweet purple liquid quenched Jonah's thirst, he sat and enjoyed the peace and sunshine until a scraping noise attracted his attention. It came from the direction of the stone cross on the edge of the green, something he'd intended to take a closer look at. Jonah groaned as he pushed himself to his feet, his body protest the movement as it too was enjoying the relaxation. He approached the memorial cautiously, not wanting to disturb whatever it was making the noise. When he saw the offender he felt disappointed.

"Oh, it's just you, old man," said Jonah.

The priest was on his knees again pulling up plant life. "Damn weeds!" Gregory violently pulled the vegetation from the earth. "Weed killer my ass!" He then looked up at Jonah, "And you!"-Jonah flinched-"What part of she's dangerous didn't you understand?"

"Having a bad day?" asked Jonah.

"Are you even listening to me!"

"You missed one," Jonah pointed to a particularly small weed. He was enjoying getting his own back on the priest.

Gregory breathed in long and deep and centred himself. "I see you've taken my warning to heart," said the priest calmly.

"Oh yeah," the sarcasm was strong, "that liquid she drooled on me really stung, just like acid it was. Fuckin' bitch."

"I'm being serious, Jonah."

"So am I. Are you jealous? Are there no little choir boys around to-,"

"Don't you fucking dare!" The priest jumped to his feet and closed in on Jonah nose to nose. Jonah raised his hands in submission.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly, "bad joke."

Gregory sighed, dropped his weed fork and threw off his gloves. "Come on, follow me."

"Hold up, I wanted to check out this stone cross first."

"It's a war memorial, you've never seen one?"

"Of course I have." Jonah read the inscription on the base of the large stone cross: In grateful memory of our brothers who gave their lives in the Great War 1914 – 1919. Listed underneath were the names of around 15 soldiers ranging from Privates to Lieutenant Colonels. Jonah bowed his head in respect and then joined the priest. "So, where we headed?"

"You wanted to go in, didn't you?" he nodded at the church.

"Yeah, of course. I almost forgot. Anyone would have thought I'd been dropped on my head as a child." He smiled to himself at a joke only he knew. "So what's the deal with Mary and Jenny?" Jonah asked.

They walked side by side on the green towards the church as Jonah had done with Jenny earlier. The sun still shone, it warmed their backs and cast shadows in front of them.

"Look son, the Smiths are not to be trusted."

"Oh, come on," Jonah protested, "how can that sweet little girl be of any harm?"

"Okay, not the girl, but no good will come from you seeing that woman."

"Whoa, whoa there," Jonah said, "who said anything about me and Jenny seeing each other."

"Jenny?"

"Yes, fucking Jen-"

"Also not a good idea."

Jonah look annoyed, "Really?"

Gregory gave Jonah a shifty sideways glance. "But it's not my place to interfere."

"No, it's not," said Jonah.

Gregory smirked.

They reached the edge of the green and started to climb the beige stone steps to the church's entrance. A lone cloud blocked the sun for a few moments, the church's stained-glass window lost its luster, birds stopped singing.

Do you feel that?

"Father?"

"Yes, Jonah."

"What is this place?" Jonah stopped climbing, Gregory carried on for a few steps before stopping, he turned to look down on Jonah. "This village I mean," Jonah continued. "When I'm here I feel, content. All my stress and frustration is lifted when I sit down to eat my lunch on that green."

"Let me guess," said the priest, "you live in a noisy, cramped, built-up, car infested, concrete jungle. Am I correct?"

"Pretty much," Jonah agreed.

"And when you arrive here and sit down in this quiet, open, fresh-aired countryside village, you feel better?"

"Yep."

"Damn Jonah, you really were dropped on your head as a child." Gregory smiled to himself knowing that Jonah didn't know that he knew.

"But it's more than that," Jonah explained. "I can't describe it though. The last forty years of my life have been hell, that's all forgotten when I'm here."

"Look," the priest pointed up to the stained-glass window, the sun shone on it again which made Jonah squint. "The LORD has a big presents here. Isn't it only natural that you would feel enlightened in His shadow?"

"If you're not going to take me seriously, then forget it." Jonah continued his climb and past the priest who watched on in amusement.

"What? I was being serious!"

"You won't convert me, Gregory."

"Father Gregory to you."

The priest opened the massive wooden doors and they entered the church, their footsteps echoed off the towering walls.

"A little overkill considering the size of the village, don't you think?" said Jonah as he admired the internal structure.

"The bigger, the better, or in your case"-the priest looked at Jonah-"just big."

"Oh thanks."

"You're welcome."

They past eight foot long wooden oak pews as they walked on a red carpet down the central aisle. The pews had detailed crucifixes enclosed in arches carved into the sides, an elaborate carved crest of what looked like leaves topped the arches just beneath the armrest. Jonah raised an eyebrow at the lavishness of it all. They reached the front row of pews and turned to face the window. Beams of purple, orange, blue, green, and yellow projected onto Jonah.

"What do you think?" asked Gregory.

Jonah didn't answer, the massive mosaic of colour rendered him speechless, the light and colour seemed to shimmer, even sparkle like a star as the sun hit the numerous pieces of glass. A cloud floated in front of the sun, halting the rays of light temporary. "It's wonderful," Jonah finally spoke. "I'm thinking you guys have the best architects in the world"-he crossed his arms-"shame really."

"Don't start that crap again," said the priest. "Can't you just enjoy the view without opening that trap of yours."

Jonah could see that he'd got to the priest a little today. He cupped his hands together and raised them to his mouth, "HELLOOOOO!" the word echoed again and again around the massive building.

The priest's body hung in disbelief, "Are you a fu-child?"

Jonah laughed, "Ha ha, you nearly dropped an f-bomb in your church!"

Gregory was not amused. "You owe me for that." The priest thought for a moment before a Grinch-like wide smile spread across his face. "Follow me."

"I don't like that look on your face, old man. Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

The priest led Jonah back towards the entrance, and after they past the back row of pews, the priest turned to his right and Jonah saw where they were headed.

"Oh no, I don't think this is a good idea," said Jonah.

"You owe me," Gregory slid open the curtain so Jonah could enter the confessional. "Get in."

"Fine, but if I burst into flames, it's your fault."

"Stop complaining, you sound like a little girl." The priest entered his side of the box and Jonah his. "Okay, you may begin."

A minute of silence passed before Jonah spoke.

"Forgive me, Father, for I have sin- you know what, this ain't gonna work, old man."

"Just try."

"Honestly, it feels like I'm catching on fire right now."

"Stop being such a drama queen."

"Oh fine. It's been- no wait, I've never confessed before. Unless you count the time I confessed to the police."

"No, that doesn't count."

"Is masturbation really a sin?"

"And what he did was wicked in sight of the LORD, and he put him to death also."

"No shit!"

"Watch your language in here, son."

"Sorry, I bit my tongue."

"Well?"

"Oh yeah, confession. This is stupid."

"Do you want another forty years of Hell?"

"Ha! Hell would have been a vacation."

The confession hadn't help Jonah, if anything it had made him feel worse. He sat at his computer desk, the monitor was the only source of light in the room and the sweet smell of whiskey filled the air. He stared at the screen, displayed was a curly red-headed woman. Jonah swilled his drink. He recalled the confession: he had told the priest everything from his past, the bad luck, the humiliation, prison, and the pain of it all. As usual, he'd stayed composed, he'd stayed calm, he'd didn't shed a tear, he never did.

He lifted his glass and swallowed what was left. Jonah stared at the photo on the screen, the photo of his ex, the ex he was going to marry, the ex who left him for a much older man.

IX - Blindsided

(8 years ago)

A pair of huge feet wriggled in the fine sand, Jonah drew in a deep breath and relaxed as he soaked in the view. He looked up straight into the sky and then slowly tilted his head forward: The sky blue stopped and was replaced with the deep blue of the ocean, and as his gaze drew closer to the beach the blue turned to cyan, and then to yellow. "I'm really here, I'm in Hawaii," he whispered.

And it's too hot.

The sea water rolled over Jonah's bare feet gently teasing him to dive in, but someone was missing. He twisted around to look for his new wife. She was where she said she would be: at the bar, a stone's throw away from the ocean. Her wavy red hair seemed even more vivid here, but no less beautiful. Her back was to him and she seemed to be in a conversation with the barman.

So so hot.

A thirst struck Jonah, and so he strolled over to the Beach Hut bar. He placed a hand on his wife's curvy hip, "What are you two talking about then?"

She gave out a little yelp before turning around striking Jonah on the chest playfully. "Goddammit, Jonah! Don't sneak up on me like that."

"Sorry, wife"-he motioned to the barman and sat on a stool-"Pineapple juice please. Jess?"

Jess was sucking on a straw hard trying to finish her own drink.

Jonah got the message. "And another of whatever she's drinking," he told the barman. "So?"

"So, what?"

"What were you talking about?"

"Kimo here was just explaining to me to be careful when staying out late. Stay on the main streets to avoid local thugs and such."

"I think we'll be fine," said Jonah.

"Yeah, people think twice when they see your ugly mug," Jess joked.

"I sound just like your type then!"

Again she smacked him on the chest.

Jonah's attention meanwhile had been drawn elsewhere. Jess's outfit, or what she thought was an outfit. It only consisted of a few thin pieces of lime green material, which barely covered enough of her to be called a bikini. Her breasts seemed eager to jump out into Jonah's large hands.

"Hey there, mister. What you thinking so hard about?" Jess quizzed.

Jonah turned to the barman who was trying hard to keep a straight face. "Do you serve melons?"

Kimo's face showed signs of a growing smile before Jess interrupted, "Jonah!"

Jonah lifted his glass and drank the sweet juice in one go. "Come on, let's take a dip in the sea. I'm sick of the hotel pool."

"Good idea," said Jess. "You should have those more often."

Jonah jumped off his stool and wrapped his huge arms around Jess, "I love you."

"I love you too," said Jess. She whispered into Jonah's ear, "This swimsuit is easier to take off in the sea."

(6 months earlier)

"Jonah! You lucky son of a bitch!"

Jonah shifted on his bar stool. "I think you're confusing me with someone else."

"Oh shut up, we're celebrating," the man slapped Jonah on the back and joined him at the bar. A loud chatty atmosphere filled the pub as well as cigarette smoke.

"And what are we celebrating, Chris?" asked Jonah.

"Your god damn engagement, what else?" Chris winked at him.

"She told you, what a fucking surprise." Jonah was not surprised, Chris and his sister told each other everything, that was something Jonah had learnt to live with.

"She tells me everything, you know that."

"That she does."

Chris caught the barmaid's attention and ordered a couple of beers along with some shots.

Jonah rested his hand on Chris's shoulder, "She tells you a little too much, if you ask me."

"Your secret bedtime shenanigans are safe with me, buddy." An unnatural smile crossed Chris's face, "I'll tell you about mine if you wish," he winked.

"That won't be necessary." Jonah really hoped he wasn't about to go there.

"Oh? Don't you want to hear about my skills at packing fudge?" said Chris.

"I can't believe I have to tell you that I don't want to hear about that," said Jonah.

"You hurtful bitch!"

"Oh stop," Jonah mocked.

They laughed and grabbed their shots. "Cheers!" Jonah and Chris yelled. They tapped their glasses together and downed their whiskeys, after pulling a face they slammed the tumblers on the bar.

"So, do you have a date?" asked Chris.

"Nothing set in stone, but we're thinking October."

"Really?" said Chris. "October? Strange time to have a wedding, plus that's only six months away, not a lot of planning time. You know how fussy she is."

"Oh don't I know it."

"Then again, I've heard you're pretty fussy too, if you know what I mean," Chris winked.

Jonah handed Chris his beer and then grabbed his own. "Yeah, yeah. Shut up and drink your fucking beer."

"Oooooo! Somebody's an angry drunk"-Chris took a sip-"So what's really up with you tonight, pissy pants."

The noise level in the pub dropped, but the atmosphere seemed to thicken. Jonah looked into his pint glass. "Ever get the feeling something bad is about to happen?" he said.

"Jonah, I'm gay," explained Chris. "I get that feeling all the time."

"Can you keep a secret?"

"Not really, no. Did you kill someone?"

"Of course not"-Jonah drank some beer before continuing-"I'm probably the unluckiest man on the planet."

"Oh behave! You're engaged to my beautiful, and not let us forget, wealthy sister," Chris boasted.

"That's just it," said Jonah, "it's too good to be true. I already told you that I spent time in prison, right? But I didn't tell you why." Jonah turned to Chris. "When things are going well for me... the devil appears and fucks me over!"

"Now you're just being silly." Chris was beginning to feel uncomfortable.

Jonah continued, "It all started the day I was born..."

(Hawaii)

"Jonah!" Jess's eyes darted from side to side hoping she hadn't caught anyone's attention. The restaurant was quite busy, but all the patrons and staff were too interested in themselves and didn't notice Jess's outburst.

Jonah poked his fish to see if was alive, he sighed in relief when it didn't move. "What? I swear it moved!"

"It's sushi, have you never had sushi before?"

"Oh sure! All the time, can't get enough of it."

Jess wasn't impressed by his sarcasm. "Just eat it and stop acting like a child." She looked to the ocean, doors lined one side of the sushi bar, they were open and revealed the moon-kissed waters.

For a long minute Jonah failed to pick up a chunk of fish with his chopsticks and decided to stab at it instead. Jess sank into her chair a little more. He finally impaled a chunk and put it in his mouth. His face quickly drained of colour, Jonah stopped chewing and spat the flesh back onto the plate. "Oh dear God that's disgusting!"

"This is not happening. I'm going to another table."

"I'm sorry Jess, I can't eat this."

"Fine, you drink. I'll eat. You can get a pizza on the way back to the hotel."

"Sounds good to me, babe."

Jess gave Jonah the evil eye.

It was Jonah's turn to slump in his chair. "I love you?" he said.

"Shut up."

"Sorry." He watched her eat and scrunched his face at a particularly nasty looking piece of sea-life on her plate. "Is anything wrong? You've been off since we got back to the hotel after our dip in the ocean," Jonah asked.

"I'm fine, just a little tired," said Jess.

Jonah looked at his watch, "Is there anything you want to do tonight?"

"Can we just have a few quiet drinks? A small club maybe," Jess pleaded. "As I said, I'm tired."

"Of course, anything you want," said Jonah.

Easy listening music filled Jonah's ears as he sat in a quiet club. He desperately tried to show that he was having a good time in front of Jess, he had annoyed her enough for one night. They sat next to each other on a round wooden table in the middle of the open-air room and Jess was finally smiling. Jonah didn't recognise any of the songs the band played, but he didn't say or do anything that would possibly spoil her mood. The song finished and a round of applause followed immediately after, Jonah joined in.

"Did you even know what they were playing?" Jess asked him.

"It doesn't matter does it? They did a good job of it."

"Job? They're performers not plumbers, Jonah."

"Here we go," he said under his breath.

"What was that, dear?"

"Nothing, my little piranha fish," Jonah said.

The band members began to pack their gear away, Jess finished her drink and checked her watch. "Ready to head back, light of my life?"

"John Cleese would be so proud," Jonah said. He kissed Jess on the cheek, then they both left their seats and headed out of the club.

"You do remember the way back, don't you?" Jess asked.

"But of course!" He held her hand and headed in the direction of what he though was the right way.

After too much silence Jonah spoke, "You don't regret it, do you?"

"Regret what?" Jess asked.

"Getting married."

Jonah felt Jess's grip tighten.

"Of course not, what kind of question is that?"

Go left.

Jonah led them down the next street on the left and continued his train of thought. "It's just I get the feeling I irritate you a lot."

"Yeah, so?"

"So..." Jonah didn't know what to say.

"Look, you do piss me off sometimes, but that's the way I am."

Jonah slumped.

"Stop sulking, you big baby. Everybody pisses me off, not just you." Jess rested her head on his large arm.

Next right.

Jonah led them down the next street. There were very few people around, the buildings seemed to close in around them, and the street lights had become sparse.

"You're lost, aren't you," said Jess.

"Shhh," Jonah hissed.

Three men approached, Jonah kept a close eye on them as they passed, but the men continued on. Jonah relaxed a little until one of the men called out, "Are you guys lost?"

(6 months earlier)

The huge black iron gates at the entrance of his fiance's house were still closed. Jonah repeatedly pressed on the remote his fiance had given him, but the gates didn't respond. "Shit!" Jonah cursed. He closed his eyes and composed himself. "It's just a dead battery," Jonah told himself. He looked to the side of the gate at a brick pillar and saw the intercom. Jonah shoved the remote in his pocket, exited the vehicle, walked over to the intercom. He pressed the button, "Hello?" he said.

No one answered.

He pressed it again, "Hello, it's me, Jonah. My remote is not working, can you let me in?"

Static came from the box along with a voice, "**** *old** *n****"

"Piece of shit," Jonah muttered.

Ten minutes passed with no sign of anyone coming to let Jonah in. He paced back and forth like a caged tiger. The gates was connected to an eight foot high stone stone wall which surrounded the grounds, a sign screwed to the wall announced: Warning! Anti-climb paint. Jonah wasn't going to find out what anti climb paint did or how it stopped you from climbing. The black gates were a bad idea too, he didn't fancy being found skewered like a kebab by the gate's many vertical iron spears.

Dark clouds rolled in threatening to give way at any moment. Jonah started to feel that familiar dread in the pit of his stomach as he search the grounds beyond the gates. No sign of anyone.

It's happening.

Shut up!

"HELLO?!" he roared. Jonah headed over back to the intercom and pressed the button again, not even static greeted him this time. He punched it with the side of his fist and the plastic case cracked. "Shit!" he yelled.

"Hello, Jonah," a woman's voice said. But it didn't come from the intercom.

Jonah looked over to the gate and saw his red-headed fiance on the other side. "Carla! There you are. Are you going to let me in?" asked Jonah.

Carla didn't look at him.

"Hey, look at me, what's wrong?"

She was obviously uncomfortable and needed to force her words. "Jonah, I- I can't let you in," she said.

"Why? I don't understand." He grabbed onto the gate with both hands and stared through the bars at Carla.

"It's over. The wedding is off," she said as the words started to come easier. "I don't want to see you again."

"What? Why?"

You're a psycho.

"I can't trust you," Carla explained. "I know all about your past, why you went to prison."

"Chris, that bastard!" Jonah yelled.

"No! He defended you, but I just can't take the risk."

"I'm not that person anymore, I never was that person. I wasn't in control-"

"Which is even more frightening," said Carla.

Jonah's grip on the bars tightened, his knuckles turned white. "It was years ago, it's never happened since!"

Carla stepped closer, "It doesn't matter anymore, it's too late."

"Why? Why is it too late?" Jonah's heart was in his feet, he felt sick.

"I started seeing someone, a while ago."

The bars groaned as Jonah pulled on them, "What! Who?"

"I can't-"

"WHO IS IT!" Jonah's voice boomed like a clap of thunder making Carla jump.

"Hello, Jonah." The man's voice came from behind the opposite brick pillar from the intercom. Jonah couldn't see him, but something felt familiar.

Oh this is gonna be good.

"Who are you? Show yourself!"

The man emerged, he was tall and thin, and a lot older than Carla. He walked over to her and put his arm around her.

Jonah couldn't believe what he was seeing. "Is this some kind of joke?" he really was going to be sick, "Dad?"

(Hawaii)

Jess screamed as she was torn away from Jonah and held hostage at knife point.

"Hey!" Jonah yelled. "Let her go!"

"Take it easy, big man, or her throat gets it," the man holding Jess ordered.

Jonah faced the three men and his wife. Jess was in the middle, the man behind her held a knife to her neck. "What do you want?" Jonah asked.

The man on his right spoke, "What do we want?"-he crossed his arms-"Let's see now. Your wallet might be a good start, hey boys!"

"Fine! Take it." Jonah reached for his pocket.

"Slowly now," the man on the right ordered.

I can take them, I know it! But I need to get Jess safe first.

Jonah pulled out his wallet and held it in front of him.

"Throw it down, there." The man pointed to the ground just by Jess's feet. Jonah did what he was told and threw it, the man quickly retrieve it and checked the contents. "Shit, man. That's not gonna cut it." The man on the left checked through Jess's bag and found nothing of value either.

"It's the end of the night, what did you expect?" Jonah explained. "We could go to a cash machine if you want."

"No," the man on the right interrupted, "I have something more fun in mind." He faced Jess square on, blocking Jonah's view of her.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Jonah didn't like where this was going.

The man grabbed hold of Jess's dress with both hands and ripped it open to reveal her bra underneath.

Jess screamed again.

Laughter from the men echoed off the building as one of them ripped off Jess's clothes. Her screams were muffled by her captive's hand, the other still held a knife to her neck.

"Don't try anything, buddy, or she gets it," the man with the knife said. "Watch him, Des."

Des rubbed his hands, "She's got a nice bod!"

The nearby lonely street lamp flickered, it gave the scene an eerie strobe effect that slowed the movement of the men trying to rape Jess. Des looked up and then looked at Jonah to check on him. Jonah's head was facing down to the ground, his fists were clenched at his sides.

"Don't do anything stupid." Des turned and took a step closer to Jonah. "There's nothing you can do."

Jonah's body relaxed, his eyes rose to meet Des's.

"That's right, relax," said Des. He turned to see how his friends were getting on, the two men were struggling to keep Jess under control. A noise drew Des's attention back to Jonah. All he saw was the whites of Jonah's eyes and then the pain from having a knee forced into his stomach. As Des doubled over, Jonah swung his open hand sideways into Des's neck, breaking his windpipe. He crumpled to the floor gargling.

The man trying to pull off Jess's underwear turned to see what had happened, but before he could react, Jonah pulled him away from Jess. He grabbed the man's arm, and as the arm straightened, Jonah thrust a fist into the outside of the elbow causing the arm to snap and bend in the wrong direction. Jonah silenced the man's scream with an uppercut. He was out cold before he hit the floor.

"S-stay back!" the man holding Jess hostage voice trembled. The knife was visibly shaking, he was in shock from seeing how powerful Jonah was. Jonah took a few steps closer to them and stayed silent.

"Jonah?" Jess said looking confused, her face was covered in black mascara. "What are you doing? He has a knife to my neck."

"I said stay back!" the man yelled.

The street lamp still flickered and Jonah continued to take small steps closer.

Jess screamed, "Jonah, please!" She looked into his eyes, but he wasn't there.

The man's arm holding Jess let go and looked for something tucked in his trousers, so Jonah pounced and reached for the knife. He took hold and pulled it away from Jess's neck, she broke free in the struggle and fell to the ground a few feet away.

Jonah gripped the man's hands which held the knife and slowly drew the blade across the man's chest looking to penetrate the shoulder.

"No! Noooo!" the man cried, but Jonah had no intention of stopping and forced the knife in. The man screamed in agony, and as he did, Jonah stepped behind him, twisted the man's head and snapped his neck. The limp body hit the floor.

Jonah was motionless except for his heavy breathing, four lifeless bodies surrounded him. The street lamp stopped flickering and it was quiet.

A sound of metal hitting the floor came from Jess's direction. Jonah blinked and looked at the scene, "What's going on? What happened?" he turned to find Jess and found her in a pool of blood. "No!" he shouted and ran to her. There was a bloody knife by her side and blood oozed from a wound in her abdomen.

He knelt by her, "Jess, sweetheart?" he said as he placed a hand on her.

"Jonah?" her gentle voice was barely audible.

"It's going to be okay," Jonah said. He looked up around him for an open window, "Somebody help!"

Jess's breathing became laboured, she struggled to speak, "Why? Why didn't you stop?"

Jonah called out again, "Please, someone call an ambulance!"

Jess held Jonah's bloodied hand, "You asked me if I regretted marrying you."

"You were the best thing that ever happened to me," said Jonah.

"You were the worst," she said as she faded away.

X - Pity Sleep

A monotonous beat thumped away in the darkness, the dance music sounded muffled as if Jonah's head was submerged in water, Jonah opened his eyes but saw nothing. Spots of light faded in and flashed in different vivid colours and the room started to rotate slowly. In a flash his vision and the music became clear, he was in a place he would never go: A nightclub. It was completely empty except for two female figures dancing on the dance floor, the spots of light stained them as the colours changed. They faced away from Jonah, and no matter how fast he moved around them, he could not see their faces.

The beat stopped, and so did the girl's dancing, he moved a little closer and now saw that their faces were featureless. A single bass drum kicked and Jess's face lit up on one of the figures. Another drum sounded and this time Sue's face showed on the other.

Sue? Why Sue? I don't understand. I don't understand any of this!

The beat continued again and the women returned to their dancing. Jonah floated away without moving until blackness enveloped him.

Jonah's eyelids twitched in time with a drumbeat until he opened them. He looked at his alarm clock, the big red LEDs displayed 02:15AM. "You gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me!" he moaned. The bed covers took flight as he whipped them back, angrily threw on some underwear, and marched into the living room. He parted the curtains, swung open the window, and glared down at the street below seething. He immediately saw the noise maker: A single car parked outside his flat and had its doors wide open, music blared from within. Two men in their early twenties were standing on the path next to the car eating fried chicken from the take-out close by. One of them noticed Jonah hanging out the window.

Jonah took this opportunity, "Hey, you!" he bellowed.

The young man ran his hand through his short brown hair, ignored him and went back to his chicken. Jonah continued to hang out the window, the chilly air of the dark night unfazed him, he was boiling over. The man with brown hair looked up again.

"Oi, arseholes!" yelled Jonah.

This time the other male looked up too. He ran his hand from the back of his neck over the back of his shaved head. He extended his middle finger -which was now pointing down- ran it down his face, and then extended his arm out while tuning the hand gesture the right way up.

That was an elaborate middle finger, are you going to take that?

No.

A crazy little laugh escaped from Jonah as he turned and marched himself out of his flat. He skipped down the steps to the ground floor, flung open the front door, and stepped onto the street.

A baseball bat had already been equipped by the brown haired man who approached Jonah and took a swing. Jonah was too fast, the end of the bat passed his face harmlessly, and as it did, Jonah stepped in and landed an elbow onto the man's nose.

"Nice Y-fronts, old man," said the skinhead, who was barely audible over the din of dance music coming from the vehicle. The young man with the bat was kneeling, nursing his nose.

A voice from above called out, "Kick their asses!"

Jonah looked up and saw a female neighbour with long gothic black hair. She hung out her window, which was on the same floor as his, and cheered him on while pointing a phone at him.

The skinhead pulled out a small knife.

"You'll regret that, boy," Jonah warned.

"Go fuck yourself!"

Jonah put his hand to his ear, "I can't hear you, you want to get fucked?"

He slashed at Jonah, but again it passed harmlessly through the air, this time Jonah stayed back in kicking distance. He quickly jabbed out a bare foot which connected with the side of the man's knee, it gave out and bent inwards. His pained scream echoed off the buildings and over the thumping beat coming from the car. The skinhead didn't look like he was getting up again anytime soon.

Jonah walked over to the driver's side of the car, bent down and looked inside. A young scantily dressed girl watched him wide-eyed in fear.

"It's alright," he reassured, and went about looking for the volume control for the stereo. He found it and turned it anticlockwise until the music was silenced. He looked to the girl again who still looked scared stiff, "I'm not going to hurt you," Jonah said. He saw puncture marks on her skinny bare arms and decided to give up trying to reason with her.

The brown haired man nursing a bloody nose was rising to his feet again looking to regain some pride. Jonah noticed and approached him, "I'd stay down if I were you," he said.

"Fuck you!" he spat blood on Jonah's hairy chest.

Jonah looked down at the mess and shook his head in disappointment. He gave the kid a quick hard jab to the nose, which now resembled roadkill, and the bloodied man returned to the ground.

Jonah looked up to the woman watching on, "When you're done recording, could you please call them an ambulance?" he asked.

The office air filled with a pungent chemical smell as Sue spread neon blue polish on her nails.

"Do you have to do that in here?" asked Barry. "It stinks the place out."

"Stop being a baby, Barry," said Sue. She thought for a second, "Ha! That's your new name. Baby Barry!"

Barry was not amused, but he laughed anyway. He was the boss's son and fresh out of high school, he also had a huge crush on Sue. Of course Sue knew this and took full advantage and teased Barry at every opportunity.

The phone rang and Barry threw himself at the handset. "Good morning, DTS Courier Service, how can I help you?" said Barry. He listened to the caller and then lowered the handset. "Sue, it's for you. Bridget, again."

"Thank you, Barry," Sue said in a melodic tease.

"Your wel-"

Sue had already picked up another handset, "Bridget my tart!"

Barry let out a quiet groan.

"Was that Barry?" asked Bridget.

"It sure was," said Sue.

"Does he still want to bend you over the desk?"

"Judging by the bulge, yes."

Barry turned away, stood up, and left the office.

"Aaaannnnnnddd he's gone," said Sue.

"He's such a wimp," said Bridget.

"Yep, he has no chance. Not with Jonah around anyway." Sue twirled the phone cord around her finger.

"Two days to go, you slut!"

"I know! This week is taking forever."

"Did you get your fix today?"

Sue was more than a little disappointed at not seeing Jonah before he headed out this morning. "No. I might have to go and get it some other way."

"Have Barry do it."

"Ew no! But I do have that pic on my phone of Jonah remember."

"Oh yes, you stalker," said Bridget.

Sue took out her phone and looked at the photo she had secretly taken: Jonah was standing, holding a large parcel on his shoulder which made his arm muscles bulge. Sue started to feel flush. "God he's gorgeous!" Sue said.

"You're looking at that picture right now, aren't you," said Bridget.

"Oh yes."

"Just don't get too carried away, Sue."

"What do you mean?" asked Sue.

"You know what I mean, you get too attached, too quickly."

"That was the old me."

"I hope so," said Bridget. "The last guy that dumped you really messed you up."

"That was different!" said Sue. "He cheated on me, that arsehole. Jonah's not like that, he doesn't have anyone else."

"If you say so, girl."

"I do say so." Sue noticed her boss's expensive car roll onto the staff carpark. "I better go, the boss is here. See you tonight?"

"Rose & Crown?" asked Bridget.

"You know it!"

Jenny tapped on the van window, but Jonah didn't stir. He lay on the seat in an awkward looking position fast asleep.

"Jonah!" Jenny yelled at the driver's side window. She tapped the window again a little harder this time, but still no movement. She tried the door and it opened. "Hey, wake up," said Jenny.

Still nothing.

"Mary, look away please."

Confused, Mary did as she was told and spun around.

Jonah started to snore.

"Oh for God's sake." She thrust her hand into his crotch and squeezed.

"Holy balls!" Jonah yelled as he woke up.

"Are they now," she let go. "Damn, Jonah. You look like crap."

"What?" He looked around trying to get his bearings.

"You scared Mary." Jenny looked to Mary who was still facing the other way, "It's alright now, the bear is awake."

"Yey! Bearman is awake! Bearman is awake!" Mary bounced to the open door and looked in.

Jonah tried to stretch out but hit the insides of the van, "Owww," he said as he hit the roof. "Oh, hey little one. I was just hibernating." He climbed out and reached for the sky.

"Come on, tell me all about it," Jenny said.

"Tell you about what?" Jonah followed her to the familiar bench.

The sun shone and the tree branches gently rustled in the cool breeze which felt good on Jonah's skin. Jenny was again barefoot and she seemed to float as she walked.

"Looks like something good happened last night," claimed Jenny.

Mary held Jonah's hand and swung it.

"It's not something a young one should hear," he said and nodded in Mary's direction.

"You can whisper the naughty bits in my ear, if you like."

"Naughty? I think you have the wrong idea about what happened last night."

They sat on the bench.

Jenny looked Jonah in the eyes, "I'm all ears."

"Fine," Jonah said. "As per usual I was rudely awoken..."

"...That poor girl must have been scared stiff!" Jenny half laughed.

"That poor girl was high as a kite," explained Jonah.

"Damn, she probably saw a bear, not a man!" Jenny said. Her mind quickly wandered elsewhere and she scanned Jonah's body discreetly.

"Very funny," said Jonah.

"I mean you were practically naked, and from what I can see of you, very hairy."

"Again, funny."

"Alright, mister grumpy, one last question," said Jenny. "Why aren't you locked up right now in jail?"

"Easy, my neighbour recorded the whole thing on her mobile," said Jonah.

"Her?"

"Yes, her," said Jonah. He thought he'd better quash any misunderstandings right away. "And, no, I'm not going to fu-thank her."

"I had no such thoughts in my head!" Jenny cheekily smiled and they both laughed.

Jonah looked to see where Mary was and found her in the shade of a beech tree tying daisies together. "Anyway," Jonah continued. "The police had no reason to hold me, and when they did release me, it was past 5am. I walked home and got ready for work."

"You should have called in sick," Jenny said.

"Can't afford to."

"Ah," Jenny said. She went quiet and looked deep in thought. "When was the last time you had a good night's sleep?" she asked.

"Not sure, why?" replied Jonah.

"You need one," said Jenny.

"And you can provide it? How?"

"Really? You don't know?"

"No, I don't. And I'm afraid to guess."

"Mary!" Jenny called out.

"Yes auntie!" Mary replied.

"Would you like it if Bearman stayed with us tonight?"

Jonah looked at Jenny in surprise, "Wait-,"

Mary shot to her feet and ran over to the couple on the bench, "Like a sleepover?"

"Yes Mary, like a sleepover." Jenny looked at Jonah and laughed at his expression, "I'm not sure if that is surprise or fear on your face."

"I'm not sure if this is a good-,"

"Now before you get any ideas, you will be in the spare room. You're there purely for rest and an uninterrupted night's sleep. Understand?" Jenny explained.

Jonah looked at Mary who had her hands together praying, "Please-please-please," she said over and over without taking a breath.

Jonah gave in, "Okay, okay! Looks like I don't have a choice now, does it?" he said. Then he grinned, "So I get to spend the night with two beautiful ladies, lucky me."

"Three ladies!" yelled Mary.

"Mary? I'm a man, you do understand that right?" Jonah said.

Mary lifted a hand in the air and hanging from it was a daisy chain. She lifted herself onto the tips of her toes, reached up and placed it on Jonah's head. "Princess Bearman!" she announced.

He rose to his feet and growled, "Grrrrrr! Princess Bearman hungry!"

Mary ran from Jonah screaming a joyful scream. The screams turned to laughter as Jonah caught Mary and he tickled her.

Jenny watched on and smiled at the two goofing around, but her smile quickly faded. She noticed the priest also watching from the top of the stone steps. Their eyes met. He looked at her for a few seconds before turning away, he disappeared into the church through the large wooden doors.

"Mind your own business, priest," Jenny whispered.

The cottage Jenny and Mary lived in was cosy and welcoming, but Jonah felt like he was in a home built for the size of children. He'd hit his head a number of times on the door frames and ceiling beams. Thankfully he was mostly covered with hair and any bruises would be hidden.

Mary greeted Jonah when he arrived and pulled him from room to room causing the head trauma while the smell of Jenny's roast, fit for Christmas day, filled the air. The girls teased Jonah at the dinner table but Jonah felt at home, he felt he belonged.

"Oh my word!" Jonah collapsed onto the sofa. "That apple pie and custard nearly killed me, nobody poke me for an hour or I might explode."

Jenny entered the living room. "Poke you? Why on earth would anybody want to do that?" she asked.

Mary's head popped up above the side of the sofa. "I wanna poke!" she shouted.

"Then prepared to be barfed on, little one," said Jonah.

"Eww!" Jenny said while visioning the messy scene in her head.

They joined Jonah on the sofa, Mary sat in the middle and cuddled up to Jenny. The evening was spent entirely watching TV and Jonah felt completely relaxed, halfway through Wall-E Mary swapped Jenny for Jonah, her head rested on his thigh and she fell fast asleep. He looked over to Jenny who motioned to him to pick her up. Jonah scooped Mary into his arms with ease and followed Jenny upstairs, he lay her in her bed and watched as Jenny tucked her in. It dawned on Jonah how amazingly fast this had all happened: Finding Enville, meeting Mary and Jenny, and now he was in their beautiful home being treated like one of the family. Where was this going? Jonah suddenly felt that familiar dread but tried to ignore it.

Jenny grabbed Jonah's hand and led him to a door further down the hall. A sign above the door read: Bless and not curse them.

"Jen, I don't think this is-"

"This is your room"-she looked into his eyes-"and thank you," she said softly.

Jonah scrunched his face. "For what?" he asked.

"For being so good with Mary."

"Oh right. She's a good kid, sometimes a smart kid."

"Her father left when her mother was still pregnant," said Jenny.

Jonah was caught a little off guard by this announcement. "Oh," he said.

Jenny's head turned to the side as she remembered someone. "Her mother, my twin sister, died."

Jonah's heart dropped. "I'm so sorry, that's terrible, Jenny," He thought of his own mother but decided against saying anything about it. "Look, Jen, you're doing a fantastic job of raising Mary, but if you need anything at all, just ask. Okay?"

She looked at him again, smiled, raised herself on her tiptoes and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you"-she turned away-"Sweet dreams, Bearman," she said. Jenny headed back downstairs leaving Jonah deep in thought.

So you're going to destroy their lives as well.

Fuck you. Not this time.

Jonah entered his room after banging his head on the door frame again.

"I swear, I'll have him eating out of the palm of my hand," Sue said as she entered the noisy Rose & Crown pub closely followed by her two friends.

"Don't you mean he'll be eating you out!"

They all cheered.

A scantily dressed red-head formed a 'V' sign with her two fingers, poked her tongue through and wiggled it at Sue.

She pushed the red-head's hand down, "Oh stop it, Bridget!"

The other girl tried to say something, but couldn't be heard over the din of the music and people chatting.

"What?!" Sue asked.

"What's his name?!"

"Oh, Jonah! Jonah Burns!" Sue yelled as loud as she could.

A hand fell on to Sue's shoulder, "Excuse me, Miss."

Sue span around to see who it was.

"Did you say Jonah Burns?" the man asked.

Sue looked at the grey-haired bearded old man, "Yes, do you know him?"

"Oh yes. I know him well."

XI - Into The Sea

(1 year ago)

This doesn't look right.

Jonah stared at the monitor unable to look away. The computer-aided design drawing on the screen etched numbers into his eyes and concluded only one possible outcome: a whole lot of money down the drain. Jonah had worked too hard for it to end like this. His car, house, and lifestyle were all at risk, and his new boss was not going to be happy. He already butted heads with him about his scruffy long hair and had to now tie it up in a ponytail while in the office. Jonah hated shirts too, ties, suits, along with sensible hair cuts, but the money this job paid more than made up for it.

"Damn it!," he yelled. Jonah clicked away on his mouse and opened some other files. "That son of a bitch!"

Someone knocked on his office door and entered. The ginger-haired man had a face that people liked to punch, especially when it spoke. "Hey, big man."

"Good morning, Ben," said Jonah. He minimised the windows on his screen. "Looking very ginger today."

"Hardy fuckin' ha!" Ben sat on the end of Jonah's desk. "So, have you seen him yet?"

"Seen who?"

"Prince fucking John, Robin Hood, who'd ya think?" said Ben.

"Ah, no. Trying not to"-Jonah leant back in his chair-"I'd like my anger to remain at a level where blood doesn't spurt out my ears till at least lunch time."

"Just be careful, it is his company now."

"Don't remind me." Jonah looked at the monitor. "Hey, Ben."

"Yeeeaaaasssss?."

"Who has access to the Waterman files?"

"Just you and our new boss, I guess."

"Gary has access?" asked Jonah.

"Of course, he has access to everything now," explained Ben.

"What about before he took over?"

"Don't know. Why, is there a problem?" Ben jumped off the desk.

Jonah thought before answering, "Maybe, I need to look into it."

There was another knock on the door which was already open, "Knock, knock!" said Gary.

"Oh hey there, mister boss man!" Ben said.

"Now now, Ben. If you get any further up my ass I'll be pulling out ginger pubes from my mouth."

Jonah couldn't help but laugh even though he despised the man. "How's the big office?" Jonah asked Gary.

"I'm not sure it fits me like it fitted my father, but I'm sure I'll grow into it."

Gary looked around Jonah's office with his beady eyes, he looked nothing like his father, George, and certainly didn't command respect like him either.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Jonah asked, He really didn't want this man around right now.

"Oh sorry, was I interrupting something?" said Gary.

Ben jumped in, "Of course not, I was just about to leave and get back to crunching numbers." Ben headed to the door.

"You do that," said Jonah. "My God you're so..."-he looked for a word-"ginger. Yes, that's it, ginger."

"You need some new jokes, my friend," said Ben as he left and closed the door.

"Ha! Ginger jokes never get old," said Gary.

"No they don't." Jonah felt something off with this situation.

Gary's voice raised in pitch a little, "You know, Jonah."

Here it comes.

"I had a strange conversation with my father before he passed. It was about you actually. He liked you a lot, a little too much if you ask me."

"He was a good man, he'll be missed," Jonah said.

"Yeah, whatever." Gary put his hands on the desk and leaned in. "I know what you did, what you've done. People like you don't belong here."

"I don't follow." Jonah stared back at Gary and didn't blink.

"I guess not." Gary pushed himself off the desk and headed to the door. "Keep up the good work," he said. Gary confidently left the room.

Jonah went back to his work and studied the CAD drawing again. "Fuck."

The Mercedes cruised along the M5 Northbound effortlessly. Jonah wasn't in a good mood, he had one of those bad feelings which usually meant a life changing event was about to unfold. And it was never a good life changing event at that. Should I fight or just roll over and take the inevitable sucker punch, he thought. It didn't matter, he knew who had changed the numbers and there was nothing he could do about it. Gary, you're nothing compared to your father.

Jonah's mind drifted and he thought about his own father: the traitor, the gold-digger. He hadn't seen him since that day at the black gates with his greedy arm around Carla, Jonah intended on never seeing him again. He wished he could've done something though, but Jonah was in too much shock at the time.

A gush of wind hit the side of the car, Jonah looked to the sky and saw a dark grey blanket of cloud over him. He looked at the green LED clock embedded in the dash, 18:24PM, he should be home in twenty minutes.

The traffic was now light, by now most of the rush hour travellers had reached their homes and were relaxing with their families. Jonah had no one, he didn't need or wanted anyone to come home to. They would only get hurt, or even worse, killed, he thought. All he had was his work and even now that was under threat, he felt like another storm was coming to swallow him whole.

Jonah pulled the Mercedes into the drive, he locked the car and entered his home: a newly built, semi-detached, two bedroom house on a nice estate. He immediately switched on the laptop on his dining room table and continued to the kitchen to make himself a coffee. Jonah threw a frozen pizza in the oven, finished making his coffee and sat at the table. "Now, let's see if my memory is still of use to me," Jonah said.

He double clicked a few icons and waited for a file to load. Jonah sipped at his coffee while he examined the screen. Jonah remembered that he had some old save files on his own computer, and this computer had never been connected to the company network. These files couldn't be tampered with.

"Son of a bitch, I was right," he said and leant back in his chair. Jonah's eyes stayed glued to the screen. "But why change it?"

He couldn't figure it out, why would Gary sabotage an account worth hundreds of thousands? The part had already been manufactured and would be completely useless with the new specs.

Jonah didn't like Gary, but he didn't want the business to fail. He gave up on trying to figure out the reason why, he would just have to get an explanation from Gary himself in the morning. Jonah shivered at the thought.

The sound of heavy rain suddenly filled Jonah's ears. He close the laptop, closed his eyes and tried to relax.

I know what you did, what you've done. People like you don't belong here. Gary's voice rang in Jonah's mind.

The doorbell rang. It wasn't a melodic tone, more of a get-your-ass-up-and-answer-the-door-before-they-ring-it-again tone.

Jonah stomped to the front door and threw it open. He saw the top of a very wet dirty-white, wide-brimmed cowboy hat as rain bounced off it. The person looked up slightly but didn't reveal his face.

"Good evening, sir, I'd like to talk to you about something very important," the man said.

Jonah looked the man over: soaking wet, dressed all in black, holding a book, a large golden cross hung from his neck. And then there was the collar. Grey hair sprung out from under the hat that was still being bombarded by rain. "I'm sorry, padre, I'm busy right now," Jonah said.

"Do you do well to be angry?"

The smell of hot pepperoni filled the air, Jonah's hunger for food and retribution hit a peak. "Yes, I do well to be angry, angry enough to die." Jonah slammed the door.

The priest didn't move and just smiled to himself. "That went well," the priest said.

The next morning Ben greeted Jonah as the door to Gary's office opened.

"Please come in, Jonah," said Ben.

"Ben? What are you doing here?" Jonah asked.

The man at the huge desk at the far end of the office called out, "Jonah, please." Gary held out a hand which motioned Jonah to a chair.

Jonah entered and made his way towards Gary, him sitting there looked all wrong, this was George's office, not this snivelling shit.

"You wanted to see me?" said Jonah.

Ben closed the office door and joined Gary's side. Jonah sat in the seat opposite them.

"Jonah, you are an asset to this company," said Gary, "but this situation with Waterman is not good." Gary sounded like some corporate douche bag from the eighties as he spoke.

"Situation?" asked Jonah.

"It has been brought to my attention that there has been an error in the design of part number 476843."

Brought to your attention, was it?

Jonah looked into Ben's eyes, Ben's eyes averted his.

Coward.

"We're going to have to recall and re-manufacture it to the correct specification at our expense"-Gary's voice grew in volume-"the reputation of this company is now in my hands!" He paused then leaned forward, "I'm sorry, Jonah, I have to let you go."

Jonah knew this was coming, but his anger swelled anyway. "You son of a bitch!" he yelled.

"Now, now, Jonah," Gary said almost smiling. "I know we've never seen eye to eye-,"

"Fuck you! I checked my personal copy of the drawings, and they are correct"-Jonah stood and thumped the desk-"You changed them!"

"Why on earth would I do that?"

"To do exactly what you're doing now. You never liked how close I was to your father, and now you're getting your payback."

Ben had been still and quiet until now. "Jonah, that's crazy!" said Ben.

"Ben, you cock sucker." Jonah walked around the desk to face him, "What did he offer?"

"What–"

Jonah punched Ben in the face.

"Fuck!" Ben cupped his face with both hands.

Gary was in the process of dialling a number until Jonah grabbed his shirt and pulled him to his feet.

"Now Jonah, don't do anything you'll regret," Gary pleaded.

Jonah was beyond caring, he slammed his head into Gary's, knocking him out cold. Gary dropped back into his seat like a rag doll. Jonah turned to face Ben once more. "There's nothing worse than a traitor," Jonah said. Ben lowered his hands which was a mistake. Jonah took the invitation and continually punched Ben's face again and again until his nose was a bloody pulp. Jonah let go of Ben's shirt and he dropped to the floor.

Gary stirred, Jonah snatched a pencil from a stationary holder and plunged it through Gary's flat hand pinning it to the desk. Gary screamed in pain. Jonah wiped his bloody hands on his ex-boss's white shirt and proceeded to leave the office. Gary's screams could be heard all the way as he walked to the elevator. Jonah untied his long brown hair and shook his head so that his hair fell down to the sides. He entered the elevator, turned around, and gave the onlookers an evil grin as the lift doors closed.

That's gonna cost me.

But damn it felt good.

(2 months later)

The Rose & Crown became Jonah's regular 'watering hole' after a failed job interview. His past was finally catching up with him, he was near unemployable. He felt depressed, he had nothing, all that he possessed had been taken away to pay for fines and compensation claims. Jonah sat at the bar, slumped a little lower, and looked to the bottom of his beer glass for an answer.

A loud group of young women entered the pub, they chatted at full volume making sure the whole place knew they were out to party.

Jonah looked at his watch. Only eight o'clock, fuck it, drink until I drop. He finished his pint in one gulp and ordered another. The girls were now next to him at the bar ordering bottles of Smirnoff Ice, their voices grew in volume with each passing sentence.

"God I have to work with a bunch of losers!" one of them said.

"Here we go," said another one.

"They all flirt with me and make disgusting innuendos!"

"In-your-end-oh!"

"Exactly!"

The girls laughed in unison.

"Honestly! There's one guy, he's like four feet tall and four feet wide. And I'm like, eww, gross!"

Jonah groaned.

I could snap their necks, I'm sure I would be forgiven for ridding the world of these morons.

"The good news is I've been told I get to interview the next driver we need, so at least I can get someone in that doesn't resemble a piece of slime."

God help us all- wait, they need a driver?

Jonah span on his stool and stood up.

"Excuse me, Miss?" Jonah tapped the girl on the back.

The girl looked around and saw a man towering over her dressed in a suit. "Oh, hello?" she said. The more she inspected him, the more impressed she was.

"I couldn't help but overhear, are you looking for a driver?"

"Ah, yes. A delivery driver. Are you interested?"

"Very much so."

"Okay then, Mr?"

"Burns, Jonah Burns," he held out his hand.

The girl held it, "Sue," she said and smiled, "I am very pleased to meet you, Jonah."

Part 3

Jack

XII - Crazy Golf

"Why are you here, Jack?"

"Good question, Doc." Jack looked around the room: boring paintings, brown furniture, floor to ceiling window with a boring view, bookshelves containing boring books.

"Do you know why you've come here?" asked Doctor Collins. He scribbled on his note pad.

Jack lay on the couch. "What did you write then, Doc?" he asked. Jack put his hands on his head and messed his brown hair up a little.

"Just noting your name, Jack," the doctor lied.

"Ah." Jack's awkward smile remained. He glimpsed at the car keys on the desk. "What kind of car do you have, Doc?" He already knew: a boring car, probably with a boring brown beige interior.

"Car?" Doctor Collins sighed.

"Yes, do you put your briefcase in the boot?"

"No I don't, Jack. Why don't we talk about you."

Jack leaned forward, swung round, placed his elbows on the tops of his thighs, and rested his head in his palms. "Am I annoying you yet, Doc? I am told I can be quite annoying," he said.

"Relax, Jack, you're not annoying me." Doctor Collins scribbled in his pad again. "So why have you come to see me. Do you think you need help?"

"You are such a smooth talker!" Jack raised his legs and swung his lean body back down onto the sofa. "I guess I should tell my story."

"Any family, Jack?" asked Doctor Collins.

"Parents, dead. Women, insane. No friends," said Jack.

"Okay, Jack. Where would you like to start your story?"

"Oh that is easy. My birth, and the death of my mother."

Doctor Collins continued to write on his pad for another minute after Jack finished his story. "That's quite an eventful life so far, Jack." He stopped writing and looked at his patient.

"So, Doc," said Jack. He reached into the air and returned to an upright position on the couch. "Am I crazy?"

"No," the doctor quickly said. "But I do think you should see me again next week."

"Is that so?" Any playfulness disappeared from Jack. "How many sessions do you recommend, Doc?"

"It's not a matter of how many-"

Here we go, the same old spiel.

"-each week I'll assess your progress, and we'll take it from there." Doctor Collins pushed himself off his armchair and onto his feet. "So, same time next week?" he said.

"Sure thing, Doc!" answered Jack. He slapped his hand on the couch's armrest, jumped up, and shook the shrink's hand. "It has been an absolute pleasure and I cannot wait until we talk again." Jack let go of the hand and turned to the exit. He walked straight past the awaiting assistant who looked at Doctor Collins in surprise, Jack headed to the elevator with purpose.

He will assess my progress each and every week! And I am absolutely certain it will be worth every penny. I will talk, he will take notes, I will bang the assistant, he will scold me, I will get bored, and I will kill him. Or, I could just do the latter.

After hitting the button Jack spun round. "Same time next week, my dear!" Jack called to the assistant and waved. She waved back and then turned to see Doctor Collins looking sternly at her. The assistant stopped waving and turned a little red-faced with embarrassment.

Easy listening music filtered through the tiny speaker in the cramped elevator, one by one the floor number lit up as it descended down the ground floor. Jack remained still as a mannequin, his hands were together behind his back as he stood at attention. Jack's expression looked unnatural, it looked like invisible hooks were pulling back the corners of his mouth, which gave the impression his mouth was exceptionally wide.

The lift doors parted to reveal the lobby, Jack walked past the large circular reception desk and exited the glass building. He stopped and looked at his watch, 4:00pm, he then looked around. Jack found what he was looking for. He headed to a car park on the opposite side of the road, a sign at its entrance confirmed it was for staff of the Glade House, the building Jack had just left. The only security visible was a mechanical barrier to stop unauthorised vehicles from using the car park, no human element at all.

Jack wandered through the parked cars and walked over to one in particular: a Jaguar, the only one, "Well hello there! What a boring car."

Doctor Collins let out a sigh of relief when he turned the key and the engine silenced, a final whiff of exhaust left the garage.

Traffic had been unusually heavy and all that he wanted to do now was eat and read, wife permitting of course. He grabbed his briefcase, climbed out of the Jag, clicked the remote for the garage door to close, and enter the house via the connecting door.

He found his plump wife at the cooker stirring something in a saucepan. Doctor Collins placed his briefcase on the dining table, sneaked up behind her, and placed his hands on her hips. "That smells nice, what is it?" he asked into her ear.

She didn't jump in surprise, she always knew when her husband was close by. "Just a stew from some leftovers in the fridge," she said.

"Really? Next you'll be turning water into wine."

"I wouldn't be able to keep up with demand, dear." She liked to occasionally remind him about how much he drinks with a friendly jab or two. "Anything interesting happen today, or just the usual?" she asked.

The doctor turned back to the table and picked up his briefcase. "Mostly the usual, except for one who was a little eccentric," he said and walked into the next room. A waltz trickled from the radio in the corner. He continued, "Poor chap's been through something terrible- well when I say something I mean somethings. Had a run of unfortunate happenings." He scanned the coffee table, "Honey? Where's that book I've been reading?" Doctor Collins put the briefcase down by the side of the sofa. "Honey? Where's that Ayn Rand book gone to?"

No answer.

"Honey?"

He re-entered the kitchen and saw his wife's legs lying on the floor sticking out from behind the kitchen counter.

"Catherine?" As he rushed to her aid something hit the back of his head and he joined his wife on the ground.

Jack leaned over the doctor's still body, "Whoops! I think I might have just cracked his skull." Jack raised his hand and looked at the tyre iron, "Naughty tyre iron!" he said. Jack dropped it and pulled out a chair from under the dining table. He lifted the unconscious doctor and sat him in the chair, then he proceeded to do the same with Catherine and placed them back to back, hands tied behind them.

Jack watched and waited.

The world was out of focus and his head felt like he'd drank his weight in Glenfiddich. Muffled screams focused Doctor Collins's attention. He tried to shout out, but his mouth was full. He tried to move, but his hands and feet were tied. All he could do was look side to side. He was still in his kitchen.

"Ah, welcome back, Doctor Frank Collins."

That voice was familiar, he'd heard it earlier that day.

Jack's face appeared very close to the doctor's, "Hello again, Doc!" A slightly insane smile was plastered across Jack's face. "I have been having fun in your absence," said Jack.

Jack dropped something on the doctor's lap. His eyes widened in horror when he saw his wife's wedding ring complete with finger. The horror quickly turned to anger and he tried to yell, but only muffled moans escaped his gag.

"What was that, Doc?" said Jack. He cupped his ear, "You do not think it is fair that your wife has no wedding ring anymore and that you want to give her yours?"

The doctor didn't understand and the way Jack spoke didn't help either. A lot of things about Jack felt unnatural.

Jack crouched and reached for Doctor Collins's hand which was tied behind the back of the chair. The doctor moaned in protest while trying to free himself, but it was useless. With his free hand, Jack reached for his back pocket and pulled out a pair of bloody garden snips, they had recently been sharpened. "You really should keep your tools in tip-top condition, Doc," said Jack. "It took quite a while to get these blades sharp." Jack placed the doctor's ring finger between the blades and squeezed hard. The cutter's blades eased through flesh and bone with a blood curdling crunch. The severed finger hit the floor.

Doctor Collins screamed and cried through his gag.

"Well, old man, you took that rather well." Jack picked up the digit and placed it on Catherine's lap. "What is mine is yours, and what is yours is mine," said Jack.

Catherine looked at the finger and screamed in realisation.

Jack looked amused. "Oh come on now, Mrs. Doc, it is only fair!" He dropped the cutters, looked at his victims, raised a finger to his mouth and tapped his lip, "Hmmm."

Blood dripped to the tiled floor from the husband and wife's hands, they slumped forwards almost unconscious from the pain.

"Oh, I know!" exclaimed Jack, excitement filled his eyes. "I want to play every doctor's favourite sport!" Jack disappeared into the garage.

The doctor tried to see Jack but he couldn't turn far enough. The pain radiating from his hand was unbearable, but it overwhelmed the pain in his head from the earlier blow. Fear grew every second for himself and his wife at the realisation of how crazy this man was. Early retirement was now a no-brainer when this was all over. Doctor Collins was sure he could still tee off with one missing finger, and would certainly be the centre of attention amongst his peers with this amazing story in his armoury.

Jack arrived back in the kitchen clutching a new object, he showed it to Doctor Collins. "I have never played golf before, Doc." Jack lined up the driver with Doctor Collin's ankle and posed as if he was about to tee off. "I could not find any balls though," said Jack. He wiggled his body trying to mimic the golfers he'd seen.

The doctor shook his head in protest.

"What is it that golfers yell before they swing?" Jack lifted the club, "FORE!" Jack yelled. The club came down and connected with the Doctor's ankle square on, the bone crumbled on impact. The shock travelled up the shaft of the club and Jack lost his grip, the driver clattered to the ground while Jack made little jumps and shook his hands. "Ow ow ow ow!"

Doctor Collins once again screamed and cried in pain through the gag, his body looked like it was being electrocuted, agony shook his body. Catherine now started to make noises as well.

"Oh, I am sorry, wife," said Jack, "are you feeling left out?"

Doctor Collins somehow heard what Jack said to his wife and feared for her.

Jack moved into the living room and picked up a framed photo off the shelf above the fireplace. "Is this you, wifey?" asked Jack. He showed Catherine the photo and she nodded. "Wow, you were hot." He looked her up and down and tutted, "I see you have put on a few, I think we should see if we can do something about that," Jack said. Again he tapped his lip with his finger. "We need music," he announced. Jack saw the small stereo on the work surface near the electric kettle and walked to it. Beside it was a small selection of CDs. He chose a CD and a track and hit play. Jack smiled his unnatural smile. I Want To Break Free began to play. "Fitting, do you not think?" he said. Jack turned and disappeared into the garage once more, but reappeared quickly, he proudly displayed an upright vacuum cleaner he'd found. He unclipped the hose and connected an attachment. Jack checked the walls for the nearest power socket and plugged in the machine. "This should do the trick," Jack said while removing a paring knife from the wooden block.

All the time Jack was preparing for whatever he had in mind, the doctor and his wife looked on in painful confusion and dread. A pool of blood formed and grew under their chairs.

Jack faced Catherine, "This might sting a little," he said.

Her eyes widened as Jack pulled up her blouse to reveal her slightly flabby stomach. And then he sliced it open with a horizontal slash. Catherine screamed and Doctor Collins struggled in his seat at hearing her muffled cries.

"Get that fat, sucked out!" announced Jack. "The all new and improved fat-o-suck from Dyson!" Jack plunged the vacuum attachment into the incision and stamped on the power button. The air was now full of Queen, muffled screams, and a vacuum cleaner sucking out the fat from an ageing housewife. Jack's voice joined Freddy's and they sang in harmony.

As the music from the stereo came to an end, Catherine's body became still. Jack looked a little confused and looked down to where he'd inserted the tube. "Oh dear. I may have pushed it in too far." He pulled the attachment from Catherine's stomach to find intestines were jammed up in the opening. "Whoops!" Jack turned the vacuum cleaner off. "I may need some training, Doc," Jack said. "I am not exactly certified for this kind of procedure." Jack removed the gag from the doctor's mouth. "One way conversations are a little dull, do you not think?" he said.

"Fuck you, you lunatic!" yelled Doctor Collins.

"Yes, Doc! Let it all out!" Jack looked as though he would burst into song again at any moment, he skipped and spun around the kitchen. "You know, Doc, everything I told you about me earlier was true."

"So? That doesn't excuse you for this!"

"My mother dying in childbirth, my father drowning trying to save my sorry arse."

"None of that was your fault!" Doctor Collins had to talk him down, he tried to calm himself and ignore the excruciating pain running through his body. "Tell me everything, I'll help you."

Jack jabbed doctor Collins on the nose and it began to bleed. He leaned in close and looked serious. "I was smart, damn it. I too, nearly drowned out there. But I am alive! A few I.Q. points left in the sea, but hey, you cannot have it all. Besides, by my late teens I figured it out, my bad luck had a cure."

"By torturing people?" asked Doctor Collins.

"No-no-no," said Jack. "Just give others a little misfortune once in awhile." Jack walked over to the knife block and pulled out a large chef's knife, "This extra mile I go? Is for fun."

XIII - False Truths

He'd figured it out. Jonah had been transported into a Disney cartoon. The birds were singing, the sun was shining, and he could hear a little girl giggling. There were no cars, no people shouting, no loud noises to be heard whatsoever. He looked out the window at the calmness, the blue sky, the still trees and the large structure behind them. His mind cleared and he remembered where he was when the church's multi coloured stained-glass window shone through the branches.

"Damn, this is peaceful," Jonah whispered. All his pain and heartache had disappeared in one peaceful night's rest. But was it the sleep? Was it this village, the church, or even the people here? Or was it as the priest said: That he lived somewhere with constant background noise, that's claustrophobic and polluted, and that coming here was as if he was being cleansed of that environment.

Someone knocked on the door. "Jonah, are you awake?" asked Jenny.

"Yes, I'll be down-"

The door opened and Jenny entered. "What was that?" she asked. Jenny stopped in her tracks when she saw the large hairy, naked man facing the window. Jonah didn't turn around to face her and waited for Jenny to leave, but the sound of the door closing didn't come.

"Are you just gonna stand there and stare?" he asked.

"Well..."

Fast little footsteps approached the room. "Is Bearman awake?" asked Mary.

"No Mary!" Jenny yelled and she slammed the door closed.

Jonah sighed, "Thank you, little one."

The smell of a fried breakfast hurried Jonah to get dressed, he entered the kitchen with a great big grin and eagerness to get the day started.

Mary jumped into the seat next to Jonah. "Are you trying to make Bearman fat, auntie?" she asked.

Jenny looked at the pair opposite her, Jonah was just staring at the mouth watering food. "Mary dear, look at him."

Mary did as instructed and stared at Jonah.

"He looks like an obedient dog, just waiting for his master's permission to devour his meal."

Mary giggled.

"Jonah," Jenny said, "go ahead."

"Yes ma'am!" Jonah said. He dug into his breakfast with pleasure and Mary began to eat her cereal.

Jenny's face blushed a little as she remembered something. "Sorry about earlier," she said.

Jonah knew exactly what she was talking about. "Are you? It seemed to me that you were enjoying the view," he said and then shoved some bacon into his mouth.

"I was doing nothing of the sort!" Jenny protested.

"What happened?" Mary asked.

"She saw my fur."

"Jonah!"

"I wanna see!" said Mary.

"Well you can't," Jenny turned redder.

Jonah was finding it hard not to laugh and had to cover his mouth so his food remained in there. Mary looked a little confused and went back to her cereal.

Jenny changed the subject, "Did you sleep okay?"

"I don't think I've ever slept that well before. It took me a while to figure out where I was this morning."

"I'm glad."

"Thank you so much, I really needed it."

"You're very welcome."

Mary turned to Jonah, "Can you stay again tonight?"

"I think I've taken advantage of your auntie's hospitality enough already."

"You're welcome to stay longer, if you want," Jenny interrupted.

"Pleeeeeeeeease!" Mary begged.

"Oh I don't know," Jonah remembered about his date with Sue tomorrow and he didn't want to overstay his welcome tonight, he'd only just met these people. "I have plans, but Saturday is free," said Jonah.

"Saturday it is then," Jenny confirmed.

Mary jumped from her seat and ran circles around the table yelling, "Bearman, Bearman, Bearman!"

"Mary Smith!" Jenny shouted, "you get back in that chair and finish your breakfast."

Jonah mocked Mary, "You're in trouble," he said with a melodic twang.

Mary stuck out her tongue at Jonah and reluctantly sat back down.

Jenny shook her head at the two, "Kids!"

A wide grin was smeared across Jonah's face as he drove to work, it remained there even as he loaded his van. The grin grew a little wider when he found out Sue was not there, that she was AWOL. Jonah hoped she was sick, and sick enough that she wouldn't be able to make it to their date tomorrow. He thought about Jenny until Sue's face flashed in his mind as it did in a recent dream, Jonah ignored the image and the old familiar feeling. This time it would be different.

The Priest looked down onto the green from the the top of the steps, Jonah was lying on the grass with his hands behind his head. "Someone looks relaxed," Gregory said to himself.

Jonah was enjoying the warm glow from the sun, nothing today could dull his mood.

Someone shouted at Jonah, "Hey bum! You can't sleep there!"

That old codger, Jonah thought. He opened one eye and saw Gregory up in the distance. Then his gaze moved to the stained-glass window. "What the hell?" Jonah pushed himself up, his eyes fixed on the coloured glass. "Hey, old man!" Jonah called.

"Yes, homeless man!" said Gregory.

"Wait there, I'm coming up!" Jonah felt like an unfit Rocky Balboa running up the steps, he reached the priest out of breath. "When did that happen?" Jonah asked.

"When did what happen?"

Jonah pointed, "The window, the patterns have changed."

"Really?" Gregory looked wide eyed and turned to the object in question.

"Yes! You sarcastic-"

"Careful now."

"-old man, what's going on?"

Gregory leaned on the wall and looked out over the village. "You're not ready," he said.

Jonah folded his arms, "Try me."

The priest could see Jonah was not going to take no for an answer. "I'm not just a priest, I'm a guide, of sorts."

"A guide?" asked Jonah with a quizzical look.

The priest poked Jonah is the chest, "Your guide to be precise," he said.

Jonah was already losing the old man, "Riiiiiiight."

"Yes. And you, my boy, are my knight."

"A knight. Okay?" Jonah's eye twinkled. "So you're a princess! It all makes sense now-"

"See, you're not ready."

"-the long hair, the dress."

"Are you done?"

"This is a fun conversation," said Jonah, "but reality is calling. See you around." Jonah started to head back down the steps.

"You can't ignore this, Jonah," said the priest. "It doesn't matter to me if you die, I'll find someone else." Gregory didn't want to find someone else; it had taken too long to find Jonah. "We met when you was a child, remember?"

Jonah stopped to face Gregory. "Did we now!" he said. Jonah was a few steps down below the priest, the stained-glass window sparkled in the sunlight directly above him.

Gregory continued, "Yes, at your school and the day your father dropped you on your head."

"What did you say?" Jonah was now angry, he returned to the priest and poked him in the chest this time. "My father didn't drop me. It was my fault I fell off the swing!"

"No it wasn't, I saw everything. Your father pushed too hard, you lost your grip, and you fell," explained the priest.

Jonah frowned at the old man and thought for a minute. It could be possible. My father had been dishonest about something as big as my ex-fiance, it wouldn't be a stretch to think that he could have been lying about this too. "Okay I'll play alone. You're a priest, a guide of sorts. Why?" asked Jonah.

"As I said, you are my knight and I need you to fight for me," answered Gregory.

"To fight? Against what?"

"I don't know yet."

"Well shit! Ain't that a bitch!"

"You can't escape this," said the priest. He needed to hook him in, "Your luck will change if you fight. No more hell."

"Look, old man," said Jonah, "you think you can talk me into confession and then scam me?! This has been fun but I gotta go, There's another stalker waiting for me in the next village."

Gregory crossed his arms. Jonah was already heading back down to the green. The priest smiled to himself, "Boy are you gonna be surprised when he gets here," he said. Gregory opened the large wooden door and disappeared into the church.

Guide? A knight? He's a fucking lunatic!

He's full of shit.

You stay out of this.

Jonah reached the bottom of the steps, Mary popped out from behind the nearest beech tree to surprise him. "Ah!" he yelled in fake surprise. "It's the idiotically happy one!" said Jonah.

"Idio-? Idioticaty-?" she tried to repeat the word.

"Alright kiddo, don't hurt yourself." Jonah knelt down, "I don't suppose you have my mobile phone do you?"

"Na-ah," she said shaking her head. Her blond hair whipped him in the face.

"Gee, thanks." He rose up and held her hand, "Come on then, let's go back."

"Yeay! Bearman is going to my house!"

"I'm sure you acted older when I first met you, Mary." Jonah remembered the girl in the woods, Was that her?

They walked across the green and then across the main road through the village. When they reached the other side Jonah stopped and looked down at Mary. "Don't you go to school?" he asked.

"No, auntie teaches me," Mary said.

"She doesn't work?"

"No, mom left her money."

"You know about that stuff too I see." Jonah started to walk again. "Sorry, you don't need to answer that, I'm being nosey."

"Yes you are," she said.

Jonah looked at Mary in surprise, he didn't know if it was his own inexperience with children or if Mary was not like other kids her age. He remembered something, "I heard about your mom, I lost my mom too."

"Really?"

"Yep"-he looked at the little girl-"but I didn't have a wonderful auntie to look after me."

"She can look after you too!" Mary swung his hand.

Jonah turned a little red at the thought and decided not to comment.

They reached the front door and Jenny was already there waiting for them. Jonah's heart jumped a few beats and he smiled.

"You have to stop bringing these wild animals back with you, Mary," Jenny said.

"Why?"

"Yeah, why, lady?" Jonah added.

Jenny put her hands on her hips, "Because they smell and eat all our food!"

Mary giggled, "Smelly bear!"

"Very funny you two. Did I leave my mobile phone here?" he asked Jenny.

"Yes you did, it's right here." Jenny grabbed the phone off a small wooden table just inside the doorway.

"Ah, thank you. Not that I get many calls, but ya know, just in case." Jonah checked the display, "Oh, I did miss one."

"I thought I heard it buzzing earlier, anyone interesting?"

The displayed showed Jonah that Ted had called. "My one friend, I'll call him later." Jonah put the phone in his pocket. "Can I ask you something?" he said.

"Of course, what is it?"

Jonah looked down at Mary and then at Jenny.

"Mary, sweetheart, could you go inside? I need to talk to the bear alone for a minute."

"Okay!" Mary ran inside.

"She's such a good kid. You've done a great job."

"She's never been trouble, I've been lucky. Is that all you wanted to talk about?"

"No." He turned to the church and the stained-glass window, he never did get an answer about the change in the pattern. "The Priest, Gregory. What do you know about him?"

"The grey-haired old man? Nothing really. I've said hello in passing, but we've never talked. Why?" asked Jenny.

"Oh it doesn't matter. I've spoken to him a few times and he just seems a little odd. That's all."

"Yeah, I got that vibe too. I don't like Mary getting too close to the church without me. But I know she goes up there sometimes to see her mom's grave."

"She does?" Jonah didn't like the idea of Mary being up there alone at all.

"I like to think that she talks to her."

"Do you go up there, talk to your sister?" Jonah winced a little knowing that was a very personal question.

Jenny saw that Jonah knew he shouldn't have asked that. "Oh Jonah, I'm not telling you all my little secrets so easily. You'll have to earn them."

"Oh I see." He didn't. Jonah looked at his phone and noted the time. "As much as I like being teased, I have to get back to work."

Jenny turned and faced the house, "Mary! Bearman is leaving!"

A window above opened and Mary's head popped out, "Bye bye, Bearman!" she yelled.

"See you soon, Mary"-Jonah waved to her-"I'll see you Saturday," he said to Jenny.

"Yes, I'll see you then. I'll be in all day so don't worry about a time."

Jonah smiled and started the walk back to his van, but he still felt a little uneasy and confused. Why was that priest trying to warn him off from those two. What was that nonsense about being a knight? Was Gregory really there when he was a child? It was giving him a headache. He moved his thoughts to his upcoming date with Sue. He hoped she was sick.

XIV - Pleasure & Pain

Jack sang. The box set of 101 Best Driving Songs was a great find in the glove box as he cruised down the A51 towards Nantwich. Jack decided to travel South keeping off the motorways for the time being, he hated motorways; they were so boring and made him sleepy. Turning Japanese erupted from the speakers. "Driving songs, my arse!" he shouted out. Jack laughed, he was still in a good mood from the previous night's events. He'd discovered a nice bounty in a shoe box under the master bed at Doctor Collins's house, enough to purchase a small car and a hotel for the night. A little bit of fortune usually followed his questionable actions, it's why he did them.

The early morning sun had risen over Jack's shoulder, breakfast was tickling his thoughts and poking his stomach. A hot sandwich bar sign drew his gaze to the side of the road, he kept a lookout and slowed the vehicle when the food van came into view. As he exited the car the smell of hot bacon grease and coffee filled his nose and tempted his stomach. He slammed the car door shut and headed to the white trailer taking in a deep breath. "Mmmm, I love the smell of a heart attack in the morning," he said to himself.

A lonely cloud covered the sun momentarily and the temperature dropped quickly, Jack looked up to the sky and noted mostly blue. A jacket will not be necessary, he thought, the warmth from the trailer would help fight off any chill.

A slim curvy figure slowly became more detailed, she was the cook and a welcome surprise. Jack was expecting a heavy-set brute of a man serving in such a place, not this young brunette. She was no more than 25 years of age and her smile stopped Jack in his tracks. Well well, what do we have here?

"Good morning!" she greeted.

"Well hello there, young lady. Are you not just the brightest thing I have gazed upon this morning," said Jack. He grinned is best grin.

"Ha! I guess you don't need cheese with whatever you're havin'!"

"Ouch! That is a sharp tongue you have there." He looked into her big brown eyes, her face shined, a mixture of sweat and oil coated her skin.

She spoke again loudly so she could be heard over the clanging of kitchen utensils, "Ya know, I have to put up with those crappy pick-up lines all day from sweaty old fat lorry drivers, so you can drop the charm." She stopped flipping bacon and rotating sausages, and leaned over a little. Jack smelled a hint of fruit. "What would you like?" she asked.

Jack cleared his throat, "Bacon and egg on crusty, and a coffee please." As Jack watched her, he wanted to add her to that order too.

"You betcha," she said, "I have to admit though, it is nice to have a customer that hasn't been pummelled to death by the ugly stick for a change." She prepare his food and poured him a polystyrene cup of old coffee. "I'm Laura by the way."

"Jack."

"Nice to meet you, Jack. Going anywhere interesting?"

"Good question."

The golden glow of the morning sun kissed Jack on the back as he lay on the ground. Long grass rustled in the wind and birds chirped in a lone oak tree. Jack didn't want to move, he could not move, his will had left him. His strong teenage body refused to accept this life any more, it would lie here until it ceased to beat. This life be damned.

"Good lord, Laura. For once I am speechless!" Jack bit into the unstable sandwich; it was disgustingly delicious.

"Then why are you talking?" She wiped the surface of the food prep area with a questionable cloth. Jack didn't answer and just looked up at her, grinned, and chewed on something that was probably bacon.

"Another coffee?" Laura asked.

Jack was about to give her the thumbs up, but thought better of it, he didn't think one hand grasping the sandwich would be enough to keep it from collapsing into an eggy-bready mess. Jack nodded.

"I love these quiet moments before the onslaught of misogyny from cerebrally challenged fat bastards," said Laura. Jack frowned at her and swallowed, but before he could say anything Laura continued, "Present company excluded of course. No need to look so offended."

"You certainly have a way with words, my dear," said Jack. "and I am not offended. Misogyny is wasted on me, I hate everyone, not just women." He waited for her reaction knowing it would make or break her opinion.

"Ha! You're alright, Jack," she said.

He smiled, Jack still knew how to reel them in. "Then how about we go for a drink later, what time do you get off?"

A shadow passed over Jack's still body as a cloud blocked the sun, the wind grew a little stronger and subsided again. Then another shadow rolled over, but this time it was of a tall man towering over him. Jack tried to move but his body still refused to co-operate.

"You look a little down, Jack."

Jack didn't look at him, "Who are you and what do you want?"

"I'm here to help you, I'm a friend."

"I don't have any friends."

"You're young, you have lots of time to make friends."

"Life sucks, people suck. Misery is my friend and I'm giving up."

"Instead of giving up, why don't you give your misery to others?"

Jack turn onto his back to face the silhouette, "What?"

'I'll be in the Red Lion around eight,' was all that Laura gave Jack before an army of large men rolled out of their trucks and forced poor Laura to slave over them.

Jack stood outside the pub and hoped it was the right place. She never told him where it was and in which town, so Jack had to use his trusty mobile phone to locate the nearest matching location. He also hoped she was alone.

Jack was about to step inside when the door flew open and a group loud people fell out.

"There you are!" Laura yelled, "C'on, let's go somewhere private." She turned to the loud group, "Later, nerds!" Laura shouted. She grabbed Jack and led him down the street away from the noise.

"Hold on, where are we going?" asked Jack.

"It's a secret."

"But I am hungry."

"Yeah? I could eat," agreed Laura.

"Then we do that first, my treat," said Jack.

"Okay, where?"

"I have not a clue, I do not live here."

Laura scrunched her face, "You talk weird, you know that?" she said, but Jack didn't respond. "Let me think." Laura put on stern look.

While Jack waited for Laura to come up with somewhere, he noticed how she looked: stunningly elegant. She wore a simple black dress that hugged her figure, shiny black high heels that could pierce your groin, and long wavy brown hair which reached the middle of her back.

"You look fantastic by the way," said Jack.

"Oh, thanks. You look very dashing yourself."

Jack wasn't sure if she was being serious, he obviously hadn't put in as much effort as her. He kept it simple with a white shirt and matching back trousers and jacket.

"Were those friends of yours?" he asked trying to do away with an awkward silences.

"Kind of, well, they like to hang around and try to cop a feel."

He wasn't sure how to respond to that. "So, where are we dining tonight, ma'am?"

"Ma'am? That makes me sound old!" She was about to swing her little black purse at him, but Jack quickly threw up an arm in defence.

"Sorry! Miss!" He grabbed her and held her close.

Laura felt the warmth from Jack's body. "Vinos. This way," she said gently. Laura hooked her arm through his and led him down the cobbled street.

"Chip!" a young voice called out.

Jack bolted upright, he looked around for the source of the voice but vegetation blocked his view.

A small dog emerged from the tall grass and sniffed around Jack, it wanted to relieve itself.

"Don't you fucking dare," Jack muttered.

The young voice called out again, "Chip?"

"Is that you?" Jack asked the dog.

The dog ignored him and began to raise his leg, aiming for Jack's arm.

A voice echoed in Jack's mind, 'Give you misery to others.'

The dog started to urinate on him. "You little shit!" Jack grabbed the small animal and broke its neck.

"Did you really want to go to Vinos?" Jack asked.

"Of course, it's somewhere I've never been and always wanted to go," explained Laura as she took a bite into her seafood pizza.

"I am surprised no one has burnt the place to the ground if that is how they speak to customers." Jack bit into his pepperoni slice.

"Yeah, sorry. I should have realised that we'd need a reservation."

"And a fat wallet, no doubt," Jack added.

Laura nearly spat out pizza from laughter. The night air was turning colder and Jack's behind was beginning to feel the cold from the metal bench. The pizza boxes were their only source of heat as they warmed their laps. Jack move his box onto the bench, removed his jacket, and placed it on Laura's bear shoulders.

"Oh, you didn't have to," she protested.

"I insist. I know goose-pimples when I see them."

"Thank you."

They continued to eat their food under the yellow glow of an overhead street light, the town centre cobbled street was eerily quiet. A pub's door opened in the distance and a few noisy men stumbled onto the street. They started to head towards Jack and Laura either in search of food, a taxi, or another pub. They were obviously enjoying their night on the town. One of the three noticed the couple, but most of all Laura, and he closed in on them. "Hello, b-e-a-utiful. How's about you ditch the old fart and hang with me?" he said with a slight slur.

Laura immediately responded, "No thanks, dickless."

His two friends laughed at him and mocked the dickless remark. Jack gave out a little sigh, he knew where this was headed.

"Dickless?!" The man went to grab Laura but Jack was already moving and blocked his advances.

"I think you should move along before you make a fool of yourself," warned Jack.

"Step off, old man, before I beat you!" It wasn't much of a warning as the man was already taking a swing at Jack. The swing missed so Jack took a swift step towards the man and pushed him into his friends. They all ran off down the street.

"Thank goodness they saw sense," said Jack. He watched them disappear round a corner and then turned to face Laura. She was already standing close to Jack and before he knew what was going on, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him on the lips, hard.

Jack ran from the kid looking his the dog. He reached the edge of the field and stopped, Jack heard crying. What he'd done hit him, Jack had never killed an animal and he almost started to cry himself.

The sun re-emerged and something shiny caught his eye in the undergrowth. Jack looked around him and saw no one, he reached and grabbed the object and again he looked for signs of movement. Jack looked at the metal container, it was heavy and about shoe box sized with a dial on the front. Some kind of safe? Jack tried to open it, but it was locked.

Cries continued in the distance, no doubt the dead dog had been found. The long grass kept Jack hidden, but Jack was now distracted by this possible bounty. He turned the dial clockwise, and then anti-clockwise and back again. The box opened to Jack's disbelief. He shoved the valuable contents in his pockets and ran.

The drive back to Laura's place was tense; they knew what was going to happen. Nothing had been said for a while now, but it was uncomfortable. Jack entered the property and was immediately jumped on by Laura, her lips firmly attached to his. After a few passionate seconds she let go and led Jack to the bedroom where she began to undress. Jack needed no help in understanding the situation and followed her lead. Laura kicked off her shoes, lifted her dress over her head, and surprised Jack by already being naked. He'd only just managed to get his trousers off. As Jack started to unbutton his shirt Laura came over and smeared lipstick all over his penis. Jack hadn't felt this good for a long time, Laura knew what she was doing and it felt incredible. Light crept in from the street outside, it illuminated the room just enough so that they could see each other.

Jack removed his shirt and revealed his toned abdomen as Laura continued to pleasure him. Laura looked up, saw his body and felt even more turned. She stood, wrapped her arms around him, jumped, wrapped her legs around his waist and moaned as Jack entered her.

"I wanted you the moment I saw you," she admitted.

"You could have saved us some time if you told me that in the lay-by."

"Shut up and fuck me," she said and kissed him with force. Jack lowered them onto the bed and he started to thrust, he fondle her ample breasts and Laura moaned with pleasure.

Jack lifted her legs so they pointed to the ceiling and pushed them together to the side. Laura knew what he wanted and moved herself onto all fours. Jack grabbed her hips and began to thrust again, this time with more vigour.

Laura grasped the bed sheets as she felt her body begin to glow, he reached deep inside her making Laura believe she had never felt this good. Jack's hands moved from her hips to her breasts and he massaged them. His hands then gripped onto her shoulders, he pulled and thrust deeper into Laura which she didn't think was possible. Laura was going to cum at any moment, her vision blurred and her body shook. Then Jack's hands moved again, his hands gripped and squeezed her neck, hard.

Jack continued to thrust as he strangled her, Laura tried but she had no hope of breaking free. The pressure on her neck stopped any sound from escaping as she tried to scream. Jack felt the climax approaching and squeezed even harder. Laura was no longer on all fours, she was still on her knees, but her chest was flat on the bed while her arms flapped around searching for Jack's grip. Jack climaxed. He moaned out loud and clenched his hands, Laura gave out a final breath and she became limp. He let her go, breathed heavy for a moment, and removed himself from Laura.

Jack stood at the end of the bed and looked at Laura's naked body. He felt nothing. Jack looked down at his own body and then wiped his penis with the bed sheet. "On a first date?" He turned to get dressed, "Slut."

He left Laura naked on the bed with her buttocks elevated in the air.

XV - Lemmings

Muffled voices and a steady beat seeped through the ceiling, boards and joists creaked and bowed under heavy weight. Jonah was wrapped in bed covers from head to toe, an attempt to soundproof himself from the outside world which failed to stop the noise from reaching his ears. The over-eager-eater in the flat above did as much as possible to annoy him, though probably not on purpose. This was not his saviour from the other night the one taking videos with her mobile, she lived in the flat next to him, not above. Jonah hadn't thanked her yet and made a note to make sure he did before his date with Sue tonight.

The bouncing and music continued.

I think you should go up, and with force, demonstrate why you shouldn't annoy your neighbours.

I'll stay friendly and ask they keep the noise down during certain hours so I ca- what time is it?

Jonah peeked out from under the covers and glanced at his alarm clock. I'm gonna be fucking late!

Ted leaned on a police car waiting for Jonah to turn up. Thanks to Jonah's 'talk' his relationship with his wife was saved, he just needed to be with her, even if that meant Ted was to be a verbal punching bag. It was not all over yet though, they still had a funeral to get through.

Jonah rolled onto the car park, but Ted didn't move and continued to lean on the police car. The policemen themselves were inside unaware of the little man's rebellious action on their vehicle.

"Welcome back," Jonah said to Ted, "the place couldn't cope without you."

"Funny as always, but you should go," replied Ted.

Jonah raised an eyebrow.

"Did I ever pick a day to return to work!" said Ted. He slapped the car and winced at the pain in his hand. Ted continued, "You really should go home, Jonah."

"Why? Was there a break in? Am I a suspect?"

"That's what I'm trying to tell ya. It's Sue-"

"Sue?" interrupted Jonah.

"Jonah, she's dead," said Ted.

Jonah's attention suddenly focused. A bloody Sue flashed in his mind, then Jess's, then his mother's. "What did you just say?" asked Jonah.

"She committed suicide. The police are here looking for you," said Ted.

"But I was suppose to go on a date with her tonight!" Jonah sat on the bonnet of the police car, the suspension springs protested. "When did she?-"

"Not a clue." A few seconds passed silently before Ted spoke again, "I guess we all have our demons."

"You don't know the half of it," said Jonah. He got back on his feet and started towards the building.

"Where are you going?" asked Ted.

"To work, where else. You coming?"

The two colleagues entered the building and immediately saw that everybody else was chatting in the loading areas. Their attention was drawn to Jonah when he entered and two male police officers approached him.

"Jonah Burns?" one of the officers asked him.

Jonah smiled, "That's me. Anything I can help you with, fellas?"

"We need to have a chat. Down at the station."

"Can it wait? I have work to do."

"Jonah Burns, you are under arrest..."

Gregory looked on at the scene from beside a silver birch tree unnoticed. He watched as Jonah exited the building with his hands cuffed together. Gregory smiled as Jonah was escorted to the police car. An officer stretched to reached Jonah's head, he pushed it down and Jonah entered the police car. Gregory watched and smiled and whistled as Jonah's colleagues congregated outside to watch. A female colleague broke down into tears, she picked up a stone and threw it at the police car as it drove away. It didn't hit, so she yelled and screamed obscenities, then she saw Jonah's car and decided to throw stones at it instead. Her co-workers try to calm her and ushered her inside. Gregory turned and walked away and smiled and sang:

"...I got a bird that whistles

I got a bird that sings.

But I ain' a-got Corrina

Life don't mean a thing."

"Rape?!" Jonah felt numb.

"Yes, Mr Burns. She wrote down..."-the middle aged officer looked over his notes containing the details of Sue's suicide-"ah, here it is, that you forced yourself on her when you asked her into the back of your van."

Jonah thought about this for a second, something was off. "So I raped her at work the other day," he said. "We arranged a date for tonight after the apparent crime, and when she found out I stayed at another woman's house, where nothing happened by the way, Sue killed herself?" Jonah looked into the officer's brown eyes and saw a faint spark, "No, I don't think it makes sense either."

What was off was how the hell did she find out about Jenny?

I smell a rat.

The officer looked a little annoyed. "It doesn't, but we have to check." He removed his hat, ran his hand through his brown hair, and stood up. This police officer didn't have any confidence or presence about him, Jonah thought. It seemed he hardly wanted to exist, but Jonah did have that effect on people, his presence usually overwhelmed anybody else's. The officer was also a full foot shorter than Jonah and had no muscular definition. Jonah felt like he could pick him up with one hand and throw him like a javelin. He suppressed a smile at the thought.

"We're looking into a few things to see if your story can be corroborated," said the officer. "Until then, get comfy." He left the room leaving Jonah on his own.

"A bottle of scotch wouldn't go amiss right about now," Jonah said to himself. He leaned back on the chair and stared at the ceiling. The light pulsated once.

You never learn do you. Another relationship, another death. How long until THEY kick the bucket.

There was no relationship with Sue though, just a one-sided attraction. She was physically attractive, but that didn't mean that I-

Sure, you keep telling yourself that.

The thought of another woman dying because of him was starting to sink in. His life was looking brighter lately but he somehow knew the shit was about to hit the fan again.

Jonah tried to focus on Jenny and Mary, he tried to fend off the incoming depression. Why was it that no matter how hard he tried, he could never just brush off the so called bad luck. Jonah could never anticipate what was going to happen, he knew something bad was coming but it still hit him hard.

His head flopped to the table and the cheekbone connected with the table with a thump. "Here we go again," he said. Jonah tried to sleep.

You should probably wake up now, they're about to release you.

Jonah slowly opened his eyes and tried to remember where he was. His face was flat on a desk, a small pool of drool had coalesced around his open mouth which was smearing the table surface.

As his consciousness aroused so too did his realisation of his situation. Jonah became alert quickly, he bolted upright on the chair and wiped the drool from the table and his face.

The officer from earlier re-entered the interview room. "Good news, big guy," he said, "you're free to go."

Jonah looked at the clock on the wall. "Wow, that was quick. It only took you 3 hours," Jonah said in a dull tone.

"Yeah, I know, but we had to be sure," said the officer. "After studying CCTV footage carefully we concluded that Miss Stone entered the vehicle of her own free will, and she removed her shirt before hand."

Carefully studying her removing her shirt were you? How very attentive of you.

Jonah remembered the feeling of Sue's breasts pressing on his back. "Well yes, it's as I said, officer."

"Sorry to keep you for so long, and please, Mr Burns, try to keep out of trouble. You're becoming a regular."

Jonah pushed himself up, "I'll try, officer, but trouble does follow me around occasionally." He headed to the door, "Now if you excuse me, I need a stiff drink or two."

"Mr Burns?"

"Yes?"

"None of this was your fault"-the officer placed a hand on Jonah's shoulder-"she obviously had issues-"

"You didn't know her," Jonah interrupted.

The officer removed his hand. "No, sorry, I didn't," he said.

"And neither did I." Jonah took in a deep breath and placed a hand on the scrawny officer, "Thanks."

Jenny used her forearm to wipe sweat from her brow and tried to avoid smearing earth from her gloves to her head. It wasn't a particularly warm day, but she had let the garden grow wild a little and now it needed more attention and effort than usual. A shadow loomed over her suddenly. She stopped pulling weeds from her flowerbed and looked at the tall silhouette. It was Gregory, the last person she wanted to see. Jenny resumed the eradication of unwanted vegetation.

"What do you want, priest," she said with venom.

"Now, now, Jennifer," said Gregory. "No need to be so rough so early in the morning."

"Morning, afternoon, night, it wouldn't matter what time of day it was." She pulled at the weeds more violently.

"I get the impression that it's not weeds you're seeing in that mind of yours, but my head instead."

"Your head, priest? No. Something much more delicate."

Gregory winced a little at the thought.

"Get to the point or leave," she demanded.

"Very well"-he took a breath-"Jonah is going to need you."

Jenny stopped her pulling and almost sighed. "What did you do?" she asked.

"Me?" Gregory over reacted to this accusation, "Why would you think that I did anything?"

Jenny's curiosity turned to anger, "Because it's always you! You're the cause of my misery, Mary's misery, no doubt Jonah's misery, and god knows who else's." She climbed to her feet, "You say it's for a grand purpose, but my trust in you was lost a long time ago. Now I won't ask you again"-she prodded the priest in the chest-"What. Did. You. Do?"

"Just one question first," he pleaded, "do you love him?"

Jenny thought for a second. "Mary's very fond of him and that's all that matters," she said.

"I see."

"Shut up and spill!" Her feelings for Jonah were not on the table for discussion. She didn't know herself how she felt anyway.

"Ah yes, what did I do." Gregory put his hand to his chin and held it. "Nothing really. I just gave him a little push to get things moving."

"Shit!" Jenny cursed. She threw down the gardening tool on the grass. "Knowing you that means Jonah's fucked, and he's about to do something stupid."

"He's stronger than that and you know it," said Gregory. "But he will need you. And Mary."

"I'll be here for that big-" Jenny's mind drifted to yesterday morning and blushed. "Just go would you, so I can get back to these weeds." Jenny felt hot all of a sudden.

"Are you okay? You're turning a little red there," said Gregory.

"I'm fine, just go."

Gregory smiled and left Jenny alone in her garden.

Jenny smiled too, but it quickly vanished. "Be strong, Jonah, we need you."

"Could you wait for a minute? I just need to make sure my car is alright," Jonah said to the taxi driver.

The floodlights had already been triggered by their presence which saved Jonah from stumbling around in the darkness. He thought he'd best not return while the day staff were here, a few of Sue's colleagues had made it very clear that Jonah was the villain.

He approached his car and saw the damage: they'd gone to town on the paintwork, scrawling obscenities on the bonnet plus a few other unsavoury words like rapist and pedo.

"Pedo?" Jonah wasn't sure why that word was used.

Because you're an older man attracted to a young woman, doesn't matter if she was at legal age. You really are stupid.

The windscreen was a cobweb of cracks, he looked at the driver's door, the window was smashed through. Jonah climbed in and put the key in the ignition, turned it, and the engine started. He gave the taxi driver a thumbs up and watched as he drove away.

Did you check the tyres first, dumb dumb?

Jonah climbed out, slammed the door shut which showered more glass onto the seat. He checked the tyres which were luckily free from slashes.

Good luck getting much for this pile of shit now. You should sue them for damages, whatever happened to 'innocent until proven guilty'? They're all the same these office girls, all talk and bitch'n behind each other's back.

Something grumbled in the air like a distant thunderstorm. Jonah raised his hands in the air, and with the force of an elephant landing on a theatre stage, he brought down both fists onto the BMW bonnet. "ARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!"

Well, that's not going to help, is it now.

"Shut the fuck up!" Jonah thundered.

He climbed back in the car and drove away.

The road was still visible through the damaged windscreen, but since there was little left of the driver's door window, a cold wind blew through the car as he drove. Jonah stopped at a 24 hour supermarket and purchased a few bottles of Jack Daniels, he acquired a few stares from onlookers who'd seen him leave the car. He also had no intention of going home to that magnolia monstrosity of a flat, Jonah wanted to go somewhere else, somewhere he felt he belonged.

The alcohol kept Jonah warm, he fell back onto the wooden bench which faced the big old church.

You can't silence me here, or with alcohol.

He couldn't tell if the stained-glass had changed again due to the darkness, or more probable, the alcohol content in his blood. Jonah tipped the bottle upright, swallowed the remains, dropped the bottle on the grass, and passed out on the bench.

XVI - Gluttony

Tiredness was becoming Jack's enemy. He cruised down the M5, choosing the quickest way south from the north-east where his last victim lay. It wasn't a choice he made lightly and he realised quickly why he didn't make this choice on a regular basis: It was boring.

The grey of the motorway and overcast sky merged in the distance, the only indication of movement was the passing of white road markings that almost sent Jack into a trance. He glanced through the passenger side window: he was passing an orchard. On the closest row to the motorway, a buzzard sat perched on top of a tree and watched the traffic pass by.

The road noise hum changed tone as the car rolled onto a different shade of tarmac, Jack's attention was brought back to the road ahead for a moment. The new tone of hum settled in and relaxed Jack once more. His eyes closed for a second, his head bounced, the right hand wheels hit cats-eyes. Jack startled back to life, "Fuck!" he said and shook his head like a dog. "I need coffee." He looked at the time and wound down the window for some fresh air. Jack pressed the radio into life and turned the volume up hoping it would help keep him focused.

A sign informed oncoming traffic of impending roadworks, the mortal enemy of all road travellers.

I need to get off this motorway.

Jack left the M5 at the next exit and drove in a random direction until he found a small cafe. It popped out from nowhere and overlooked the road from its elevated position. Jack parked and exited his vehicle. He stretched and took in the beautiful landscape before him: Green, brown, and yellow fields patchworked the landscape with a large river cutting through it, great old trees sporadically lined the river like giant guardians protecting the water from an encroaching malevolence.

He turned to face the cafe which was a rectangular, white, wooden building, and took in a deep breath, "Ahhhhhh, bacon."

Jack ordered his food and coffee, took a seat in the corner with his back to the entrance and peered out at the view through the large window next to him. "Shame about the weather," Jack whispered and sipped his hot beverage.

It was busy in the cafe and he felt lucky to find table, but then someone loomed over him. His senses tingled, Jack tried to ignore it and continued to peer out the window, but the looming presents spoke.

"Excuse me, young man."

Jack looked at the tall, old man dressed in black. "Can I help you, padre?"

"Is it okay if I sit here?" asked Gregory. "No empty tables left you see," the priest gestured to the other tables which were mostly full. Jack noticed the table that weren't full and saw they were cluttered with plates and cups not yet cleared away.

"Sure," Jack said reluctantly, "but no God speak. I have no interest and cannot be turned."

The priest slid into the seat with a smirk, "Turned? What a strange way to put it. Sounds like you're on the dark side."

"Sure, whatever you say," Jack said dismissively.

An ageing woman dropped a plate on the table in front of Jack. "Bacon, eggs, fried bread, beans, and tomatoes," she said.

"Thank you, my dear," said Jack.

The priest's eyes grew large. "That looks fantastic!" Gregory drooled, "I'll have the same please, Miss."

The woman scribbled in her notepad and walked away with the enthusiasm of a sloth.

"I guess my excitement was too much for her," Gregory said.

"I guess," Jack cut a piece of bacon in half and swallowed it.

"What? No brown sauce?" Gregory asked.

Jack raised his eyes and sighed in his mind. This priest will not shut up. "Not just yet, I like to taste the food before I drown it."

"Fair enough!" The priest put his elbows on the table and rested his chin on his hands, almost praying, "Any good?"

"Good enough," Jack said. He thought about how playful this priest was, not monotone and colourless like the ones he'd come across before. "I get this feeling that you are not like most priests."

Gregory sat up straight in his seat, "I maybe a little livelier than most." A mischievous smile crept across the priest's face. "Do you get feelings about people often?"

"What the hell does-"

"-Watch your language in my presence please."

"In your presence?" Jack was amused by this. "Oh excuse me, you worship! Never again will I soil the ears of the great priest of where-ever-the-fuck-we-are again!" Jack boomed.

Gregory let out a small laugh. "Oh wow," he began to clap a slow clap. "Bravo. Bravo!"

The cafe had fell silent, but it quickly returned to its former din.

Jack raised an eyebrow then continued to eat his fried breakfast for a minute before adding a dollop of brown sauce to the side of the plate.

The miserable ageing woman returned with Gregory's food, she also refilled their cups with coffee. "That was quite a show, there's no problem here right?" the old waitress asked.

The priest gave her a smile, "Oh no trouble at all, I'm sorry if we caused a scene."

The waitress smiled back at Gregory, "No trouble at all, just checking. Enjoy your food."

Jack had ignored the whole conversation and continued to eat. The priest watched as the waitress walked away and then said a prayer and dug into his food.

"Are you not adding sauce?" Jack asked.

"I thought I'd give your way a try," the priest chewed on a piece of warm bacon, scrunched his face and swallowed. "You lied," he said.

Jack didn't say anything and just continued to eat his own.

Gregory didn't like the silence, "Travelling anywhere interesting-" he paused for a second, "I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name! I'm Gregory."

"Jack"-they shook hands-"and no, I am not going anywhere in particular, just heading south."

Gregory only just managed to hold in a laugh. He didn't think half-chewed chunks of bacon would suit Jack's attire.

Jack internally sighed again, "What?" he was visibly annoyed.

"Like a bird flying south for the winter?"

"Yes, so?"

"I'm sorry, it must be my old age. I was imagining you flying in the air, flapping your arms," the priest flapped his arms.

"Did you take your crazy pills this morning, old man?"

The priest closed his eyes and concentrated on something. "I called out to the Lord, out of my distress, and He answered me!"

"I guess not." Then Jack's mind wandered to a time long ago: He lay in an empty field of long grass when a sudden shadow loomed over him. "Hey, crazy priest. Have we met before?" Jack asked.

Gregory didn't answer for a minute until Jack was about to ask again. "I don't think so, Jack." Gregory didn't look up and continued to feed his face.

Jack finished his food, looked out the window to the countryside and river below and shook the past from his mind. He sipped at his coffee. "I need a challenge," Jack whispered.

The entrance to the cafe swung open and a fat man walked in. He wore a black tee with a picture of a white wizard on it, his sweat pants looked like they had been slept in for a week, and the bottom of his gut showed; it wobbled as the man waddled to the counter.

"Gluttony, such an ugly sin, don't you think?" Gregory motioned at the fat man with his fork, Jack turned to look at him. The priest continued, "I bet he collects all kinds of apparel from those movies he obviously loves so much."

"What do you mean?" Jack asked.

"You know, swords and stuff, from the movies?" Jack's face was blank, "The Lords of the Rings?" Gregory said.

"Oh, never seen them. Any good?"

"They're okay, if you like that sort of thing. A little on the violent side."

A minute of silence passed while Gregory finished his food. The fat man had taken a seat at an empty table and a plate barely able to contain its contents was delivered. The priest pulled a face at the mountain of grease soaked, processed, toilet breaking breakfast food the fat man was about to devour. Gregory was thankful when Jack spoke again.

"So where are you headed, Greg?" asked Jack.

"Oh nowhere, I come here every now and then just for the view," the priest lied.

"Really, and you have never had the food before?" said Jack.

"Nope. I've been missing out," Gregory said with a hint of sarcasm, "But someone obviously likes it here."

Jack turned to look where the fat man was. "Someone should educate him," he said. Jack looked back to the priest with his eyebrows raised.

"Me!?"

"Why not?"

"Look, Jack, my job is not to lecture those who have already lost their way -as he obviously has- but to gently guide those who need direction."

"What a load of crap," said Jack.

"Haha, you got me," Gregory held up his hands in submission. "I'm just old and tired. Can't be bothered any more I guess." He lowered his hands, "Non believers see a priest and automatically put up a barrier, it gets exhausting. Maybe I should get an assistant."

"Do not look at me, old man." Jack looked at the priest in the eyes, "I do not believe a word in that bullshit book you call the Bible."

"Careful now, Jack," Gregory's face became serious, "I'm not so old and tired that I can't kick your ass into next week."

They looked at each other for a moment.

Jack broke the tension, "Ha! You are alright, old man." He slapped the table then pointed at Gregory, "For a priest that is."

Gregory relaxed, "Thanks, I think." He slid in the seat and stood up, "I need to get back and tend to something, but if you ever need someone to talk to, you can find me here." The priest wrote on a white napkin, "The village is small, and some of the residents are quite, how to put it? Challenging."

Jack raised an eyebrow again, "It feels like I just picked up a girl in a bar," he said to himself.

The priest continued, "And I do think you should educate that young man for me." Gregory placed a hand on Jack's shoulder, "I have a feeling you'd get through to him."

Gregory left the cafe leaving Jack deep in thought. The ageing woman returned once again and slid a small plate next to him: the bill. Jack looked at it for a moment. "Son of a bitch!"

Water started to fall from the sky, the sound of raindrops bouncing off the car's metal body filled the air. He'd reluctantly paid for the priest's meal earlier and decided to forget all about him and wherever he was. But something itched at Jack, an itch Jack hadn't felt before. He sat in his car still frustrated from being bested by that old man and kept an eye on the rear-view mirror, visibility was bad due to the rain and the wiper on the rear window didn't work either. He glanced at the dash for the time: 10am. The door to the cafe opened, which drew Jack's attention. A blob of a person ran for his car and Jack recognised him, no one else could be a blob that big.

"Finally! Did you eat a whole pig, you fat fuck?" Jack said. He watched as the fat man in the Lord of the Rings tee ran for his car, and continued to watch as the suspension almost failed under the fat man's mass.

Jack started the engine and followed him.

So you want me to educate him, priest.

"If only you knew what my idea of education is, old man."

"Forgive me, Father, for I am about to sin."

"Just do it, arsehole."

"I am joking of course. You really do not think I am religious, do you?"

"Wouldn't surprise me."

"I like your basement, by the way."

"Oh, thank you, all is forgiven!"

"Dark, damp, cool, and most importantly, soundproof."

"Were you born, or did you congeal in a gutter somewhere?"

"Clever! But you can not anger me."

"Oh for crying out loud."

"You have some interesting ornaments. I particularly like this one. What is it exactly?"

"It's Narsil, a sword from the Lord of the Rings movies."

"Is that so. I really like the Japanese katana you have, but this one is more suited for what I am about to use it for."

"Please, just make it quick."

"Oh, I am afraid not. I am going to feed it to you nice and slow."

"Please God no!"

"Open. Wide."

XVII - Shadowfall

Whiskey lingered in the thick air. Early morning light struggled through the curtains and gave little illumination to the spare room of Jenny's cottage. Snoring that resembled growls grew louder from a lump on the bed. It didn't move, only breathed; nothing or no one could stir him.

You're pathetic.

It wasn't my fault!

No, of course not. She accidentally hung herself.

Shut up.

Why don't you just give up?

You know why.

Oh yes, your mother. That old excuse again.

She gave her life for mine. How could I ever ignore that?

I think she'd understand.

It doesn't matter.

I don't think YOU understand.

What?

I own you, I always owned you. You are a slave, a slave until you die.

I am not your slave!

Drown, drown, drown.

Shut up.

Spend, spend, spend.

Get out of my head!

Repay, repay, repay.

You don't exist!

Pretend to live.

You. Don't. EXIST!

Survive and breathe,

"Bearman?"

breathe in our breath.

Mary?

Eat your daily bread,

"Are you awake?"

bread from your dead.

I swear if you touch her!

You mean if YOU touch her.

I'll kill you!

You'll kill yourself.

"Ted?" Maggie searched for her husband. She started to panic, the house around her closed in. "Ted?!"

A muffled voice eventually answered, "I'm in the garage!"

Maggie opened the connecting door, but she couldn't see Ted. Boxes upon boxes blocked her view and the smell of damp cardboard filled her nose. "What are you doing in here?" she asked.

"Oh just tidying up a bit." Ted's head popped up over a short stack of boxes. He looked at his wife in the doorway and saw how frightened she was. "What happened? You okay?" asked Ted.

"Oh nothing, I'm fine," she smiled. "I just, I just got a little worried when I couldn't find you is all."

"Well, worry no more. Super-Ted is here!"

Maggie let the awkward silence linger a little before she said something, "Idiot." She shut the door and moved back into the living room.

Ted felt like an idiot, and he probably looked like one too.

Tending to his wife had taken its toll, it was now the weekend and he just wanted to keep his mind off things and tidy the garage. But it was difficult, Ted hadn't heard a word from Jonah since he was taken away by the police. Add the loss of his child and Sue's suicide, it had been a few weeks to forget.

Jonah's advice had been spot on. Ted stayed at his wife's side; she blamed him, she shouted at him, she hit him. But still Ted stayed. He now understood how important his task was, if he'd not been there he feared Maggie would not be here with him now. Ted had been the perfect husband; Jonah would have been proud.

Music suddenly bounced around the garage. Hound Dog didn't sound good coming from his mobile phone and Ted usually only had to listen to a few seconds of it before he answered, but this was different. Ted couldn't see his phone and scrambled in the cardboard jungle for it, he knew who it was, this ringtone was only assigned to one person: Jonah.

Ted hit something with his foot and it slid and hit an open box containing an old Nintendo games console that Jonah had given to him. He pounced on the phone and answered, "Hi, Jonah? They let you out already?"

A woman's voice answered, "Ted I presume?".

Ted looked at his phone, the caller I.D. showed it was Jonah. "Uh, hello?" Ted said bemused.

"Oh Jesus," Jenny already knew this was an idiot. "Is. This. Ted?" she said clearly as possible.

Ted began to nod.

"I really hope you're not nodding your head," Jenny said.

Ted looked around his garage suspiciously.

Jenny snapped, "Oi! Focus. Speak. Are you Ted?"

"Y-yes," said Ted.

"Good. Well done. Get a pen."

"What? Why?"

"Because I need to give you my address. Jonah is here and he needs your help."

The body on the bed had morphed from a snoring lump to a stiff board-like mannequin staring at nothing on the ceiling. Jonah was and wasn't awake, he didn't feel the pain in his head the hangover brought; he didn't feel anything.

Are you going to talk to her?

I want to, but I can't.

Go on, you know you want to.

No.

Get nice and friendly. Hell, become her daddy, and then watch her die.

No one else is going to die because of me!

Then who will protect them?

Protect them from who?

Anyone.

WHO!

The priest?

Why would he...

Kill them?

He wouldn't.

He might, if it meant your obedience.

Fuck you!

I am you!

Mary's head appeared from behind the door and she looked into the room. She saw Jonah lying on the bed, he looked dead and the smell of alcohol still lingered in the air. She cautiously entered only letting the door open six inches before she she could get through, her gaze never left Jonah's still body. She could see his eyes: unblinking and staring into nothing. Mary crept up to the bed. "What are you looking at, Bearman?" she said and looked up to the ceiling. He didn't respond. She leaned in closer and looked at his chest and watched it rise and fall. Mary climbed on the bed and lay next to him, and like Jonah, she stared up at the ceiling.

Mary began to sing softly:

"What would you think if I sang out of tune,

Would you stand up and walk out on me.

Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song,

And I'll try not to sing out of key.

Oh I get by with a little help from my friends,

Mmm, I get high with a little help from my friends,

Mmm, gonna try with a little help from my friends."

Jenny looked up at the stained-glass window from the grass square below. The patterns in the glass remained unchanged as they always had, but her mind always saw something different from time to time, and this was one of those times. Jenny didn't like what she saw.

"What do you see?" Gregory surprised Jenny, he sat next to her on the wooden bench.

"Oh, it's you."

"Were you expecting someone else?"

She didn't answer.

"So, what do you see?" asked the priest.

Jenny sighed, "I'm not sure, but I don't like it." She continued to stare at the window which made the priest curious.

"Oh?"

"A shadow, maybe," she turned to Gregory, "and what do you see, priest?"

He smiled at her. "An open window into your mind."

"Oooo, clever!" Jenny turned back to the church, "So, a Rorschach test."

"You'd have to ask those who built it, but I think you'll find that there was no such thing as a Rorschach test in the middle ages."

Jenny wrapped her thin light blue cardigan tighter around as a stiff breeze hit. "The window could have been replaced," she said.

"You know, we could talk about this windows all day," said Gregory. "What's really on your mind, Jennifer?"

Her shoulders slumped a little. "It's Jonah, he hasn't said a word," she explained, "he just lies there on the bed staring at the ceiling."

"I see."

Jenny dropped her head in disbelief, "That's it? I see?!"

Gregory felt the tension rise and Jenny's anger made her swell.

"What exactly did you do, priest? You-you- whatever you are," she said.

Gregory stayed his calm self, "I told Jonah the same thing as I told you, I am a guide-"

"Oh shut up with that cryptic bullshit! What. Did. You. Do?" Jenny's patients was no longer present.

Gregory saw her eye twitching, "Okay, okay! I can see I'm losing my audience her so here it is."

Jenny crossed her arms knowing he'd probably only tell her what she needed to hear.

"Let's see," the priest tapped his finger on his lips, "ah, yes of course. From the beginning."

"From the beginning of what, old man?" asked Jenny.

"Of Jonah's life, an unfortunate life."

"Well be quick, it's cold."

"Do you want to cuddle?" joked Gregory.

"Do you want a knee to the groin?"

"I'll take that as a no." The priest continued to the point, "First of all, I need to tell you about Myles, Jonah's father."

"Oh, fuck me," Jenny's head fell into her hands. "Is this really necessary?"

He ignored the comment, "He was a good man, but on the night of his son's birth something happened, something that changed Myles. Something inside him snapped, he lost control of himself for an instant. And this was before he found out his wife had died."

Jenny looked at Gregory in surprise, "Jonah's mother died in childbirth?"

"Yes, the first woman to die because of his existence." The priest took in a deep breath, "And of course we know it's not his fault, but unfortunately, that's what Jonah believes."

"I see," said Jenny.

"That's it? I see?" the priest mocked.

"Really, Gregory? Jokes?"

"Sorry."

"You said that was the first woman to die?" Jenny said.

"Ah yes, but I'll get to the those in a minute," said Gregory.

"He didn't actually kill these women, right?"

"Of course not. Now, let me continue..."

"What do I do when my love is away,

Does it worry you to be alone.

How do I feel by the end of the day,

Are you sad because you're on your own.

No, I get by with a little help from my friends,

Mmm, get high with a little help from my friends,

Mmm, gonna try with a little help from my friends."

"...and after she found out he stayed here with you, she hung herself. Jonah blames himself."

A minute of silence passed as Jenny finished absorbing the story. She rose to her feet, faced the priest, and slapped him in the face, hard.

"Hitting a priest?" he said cupping his check, "that's a bit low don't you think?"

"You're no priest! I don't know what you are or where you came from, but all you've done is cause my family misery. And now? Now Jonah is suffering."

"I need him. We need him," said Gregory.

"We? I hope you haven't been doing this for my sake!" The thought terrified Jenny.

"Well, not just you."

"Go fuck yourself."

"That's rather difficult at my age."

"More jokes? How old are you anyway?" She wasn't sure why she asked that. Jenny knew that he'd lie.

"I'm in my 50s," answered Gregory.

"Really, and how long have you been in your 50s?"

"I think a better question would be: How long have I been known as Gregory."

"Would you believe in a love at first sight?

Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time.

What do see when you turn out the light?

I can't tell you, but I know it's mine.

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends,

Mmm, I get high with a little help from my friends,

Oh, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends."

Jooooonaaah! Jooooonaaah!

What.

She knows.

Who knows what?

She knows you're a monster.

Jenny?

And now you're in bed with a little girl.

You're sick.

I'm sick, you're sick, everybody's sick. Including the priest.

Gregory?

Yes him. You remember what he called you, right? A knight.

And he, a guide.

Sounds like there's more to him than meets the eye.

So what?

How did Sue find out that you spent the night here exactly?

The priest?

The priest.

The small car's engine screamed. Ted finally noticed and changed gear, the car relaxed. Ted, however, was not relaxed. It had been hours since Jenny called him and he was worried about his friend.

The SatNav spoke, "In 100 yards turn left."

The sun kissed the horizon, a wash of blue, pink, and orange spread in the sky.

"Turn left."

"Shit!" spat Ted. He hit the brakes and turned the car, the tyres protested but he made the corner in time.

Ted was grumpy after having to deal with Maggie's parents. He couldn't leave his wife home alone and so opted to drag her mom and dad over for company. This had proven more difficult than expected. They had barely shown any support for their daughter in recent events, so when it was Ted that needed them it was like pulling teeth. But somehow he'd managed to get them over to keep Maggie company for a while.

Again Ted let the engine rev too high for too long before changing gear, the peaceful wood the road cut through sounded like it was being attacked by a one ton chainsaw.

Ted saw the weather-worn sign ahead of him. "Finally! Enville huh? I never knew this place existed."

He slowed the car as he entered the village. "Hold on, buddy, I'm nearly- holy crap how big is that church?!"

"Do you need anybody?

I need somebody to love.

Could it be anybody?

I want somebody to love."

"Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends,

Mmm, gonna try with a little help from my friends,

Ooh, I get high with a little help from my friends,

Yes, I get by with a little help from my friends,

With a little help from my friends."

"Mary?!"

Nothing but silence. Jenny found the quiet unnerving when both Jonah and Mary were in the same building. The silence was interrupted by an angry sounding vehicle. It became quiet again, a door slammed, quick footsteps became louder, and then knuckles rapped at the front door.

"Who is it?" yelled Jenny.

"It's Ted!"

Jenny looked at the clock on the wall. "Took you long enough," she said under her breath.

She opened the door and Ted looked up at Jenny, she seemed to glow. Ted snapped his jaw shut.

"H-hi!" said Ted.

"About time." Jenny tried to not look surprised at his small stature. "Come on in."

Ted stepped in and wiped his feet. "So how is he? What happened?"

Jenny explained the situation, Ted removed his coat and they headed upstairs to the spare room. Mary must be in her room, Jenny thought, listening to The Beatles again. They stopped at the spare room door.

"Do you think you can help?" she asked.

"Honestly?" said Ted. "I don't know. But I owe him big time."

She opened the door and looked to the bed where Jonah lay. She covered her mouth with her hand in shock and a tear ran down her face as she stood in the doorway.

"Hi there. There seems to be a life form of some kind attached to me," Jonah said.

Jenny laughed and noted the life form: Mary was fast asleep, her head rested on Jonah's shoulder and her arms reached as far as they could around him.

"How are you feeling?" Jenny asked.

Jonah let out a huge sigh, "It feels like every emotion possible is eating at me," his expression changed, he thought of Gregory. "And I need to speak to a priest."

Jenny approached the bed and sat on it. "Ah, I'm guessing you already have a priest in mind?" she said.

"Oh yeah. That mother f-" he held his tongue just in time, "that priest, I need some answers from him."

"He's not all that he seems."

"Tell me something I don't know," said Jonah

Ted joined the conversation, "Well there's apparently a few things I don't!"

Jonah tilted his head to look behind Jenny. He saw a short round person in the doorway.

"Ted?"

"God damn it!" yelled Ted.

Mary covered her mouth with both hands and snickered.

"Please try and remember there's a child in the room," said Jenny a touch irritated.

"Sorry ma'am," said Ted.

Jonah shook his head knowing what was coming.

"Ma'am?" Jenny glared at Ted.

"Ma'am!" yelled Mary.

"Don't you start, young lady!" Jenny pounced on Mary from the sofa and tickled her on the floor. Mary screamed and laughed.

Ted dropped the controller. "You're too good, Jonah. When it comes to video games you'll always beat me."

Jonah placed his controller on the small coffee table in front of him. "I can't believe you still had this old thing. I thought you'd flog it as soon as I gave it to you."

"Why do I get the feeling you just wanted to dump your sh-, this"-Ted examined the console-"Nintendo Entertainment System."

"Mary?" said Jonah.

"Yes?" Mary answered.

"Would you like to keep this here to play with?"

"Umm, okay!"

Jonah looked at Jenny, "Is that okay with you, ma'am?"

Jenny resigned to being called ma'am, "Fine, it can stay. It might actually keep you two quiet and from wrecking the place."

"Good," said Ted as he stood up, "one less thing in my garage. I should get back to Maggie."

"How is she doing?" asked Jonah.

"Oh, almost back to herself. She started calling me an idiot again."

"That's good." Jonah raised himself and held out a hand, Ted grabbed it. "Thank you for coming over, friend."

Ted squeezed Jonah's hand tighter. "It was a pleasure." Ted looked at Jenny, "And it was interesting, finding out about your little secret life here." He let go and made his way to the front door. Jonah and Jenny followed, Mary grabbed a controller and started playing Double Dragon.

"Thank you, Ted," said Jenny.

"Thank you for the call, ma'am."

"Oi!" Jenny protested.

Ted hugged her, patted Jonah on his huge arm, and walked to his car.

"We'll have to get a beer soon, old man." Jonah yelled.

"First round is on you!"

The living room was abnormally quiet while Jonah waited on the sofa for Jenny and tea. Mary was now in her own bed and with Ted gone the house was too quiet. He sat there in silence, the beating of his heart pounded at his chest as he waited. Jonah still felt like shit, he was surprised that he was alive after the consumption of that much whiskey. He needed proper sleep where he was torment free, he needed a priest; a priest that could explain a certain suicide. Jonah rubbed his temple, his mind swam, his head hurt.

Jenny appeared, "Here, some aspirin and a cup of tea. Looks like you could use both." She sat next to him and sipped at her own tea.

"Thank you, Jenny. You've done so much for me, I don't deserve it."

"Oh Jonah"-she placed a hand on his thigh-"look at me. What happened with Sue, it wasn't your fault."

"You know what happened?"

"Yes, Gregory told me everything."

"Everything?" Jonah wasn't sure he liked the sound of that.

"Yes, everything." Jenny place a hand on his cheek, "I like you, Jonah, a lot."

Jonah's heart became heavy, tears welled up. The warmth of her palm comforted him.

"Mary obviously loves you too, so I suppose, what I'm trying to say is, that we would like you to be a regular visitor to the house."

Jonah now looked a little confused. "Visitor?" He loved her, he had to tell her, "Jenny, I think I lo-"

She leant in and kissed him on the lips, Jonah embraced her, he hugged her tightly.

"Before this can go any further, we need to get your head straight."

"Yes ma'am."

"The spare room is all yours for now," Jenny said. "I'm tired. I'll make you a big breakfast in the morning." Naughty thoughts entered her mind, "Oh, and I would appreciate it if you wouldn't stand in front of the window naked."

An embarrassed Jonah smiled, "Of course. We wouldn't want any peeping Toms staring now, would we?"

Jenny coughed, "Yes well, good night, Jonah."

She left him alone on the sofa. Jonah's eyes watered, he was conflicted, he was happy, sad, angry. But most all he was scared.

You've done it now, Jonah.

What? They love me, and I love them.

So, you know what that means, don't you?

Shut up.

Go on, say it.

SHUT UP!

They're all going to DIE.

Part 4

Life

XVIII - Circles

A crow cawed, a breeze rustled the trees, Jack shivered. He grabbed at the loose covers in the darkness and wrapped them tighter around him. His knee hit the handbrake lever so he straightened out his leg, but then his foot hit the glove box.

For once luck had not been on Jack's side. He struggled to find this place, the place where the priest was. His phone was useless -with no signal of any kind- and this car was too old to have any electronic technology installed. All he found was this forest, a forest Jack would be happy to cut down with his bare hands.

He'd slept in cars before of course always being on the move, but he always swore it would be his last, it never was. This was the worst part of never staying in one place for long. Jack didn't do routine, he didn't want a steady job that barely scraped a living for his wife, kids, and mortgage. It mortified him. He was sure it mortified everyone else too and was happy to help them let go of the mortal coil.

It had been a week since his encounter with the priest and the fat man, no other opportunities had presented themselves since then and so he'd ran out of money and food. The fat man didn't have much in the way of cash, just a living space full of trinkets, memorabilia, and action figures in which too many were of cartoon looking little girls. Jack did keep the Japanese katana, it was an impulse buy of sorts, he saw it and immediately knew he had to take it even though it was blunt as a butter knife. But that was no longer the case, after spending twenty minutes a day on it for the last week it was now worthy of being called a sword. Jack kept it hidden in the boot of the car, in its scabbard wrapped in a sheet.

Jack hadn't travelled too far away from the cafe in search of 'opportunities', he felt he needed to remain close to the priest somehow. Something attracted him to this place, to this address written on a napkin, an address he couldn't find.

A crow cawed again and other birds now joined the song. Jack peeked a looked but it was still pitch black to his eyes, maybe the birds up in the trees saw a faint glow of the coming day. A strong wind hit, the car rocked slightly and the tree's rustle increased in volume. Then another rustle sounded, but it was close, it was of footsteps. Jack opened his eyes, still no sign of any light. He wiped the closest window with his forearm to remove the condensation, but saw nothing. Jack heard nothing, not even the birds or the trees. He waited motionless; the footsteps didn't return.

The kitchen clock ticked, Jenny looked at it and frowned. "Mary?!" she shouted.

Someone in the living room squeaked, "Yeah?"

"Could you get that lazy, hairy bear out of bed for me, honey?" Jenny asked.

"Okay!" Mary jumped to her feet.

"And don't forget to knock the door first!" Jenny reminded Mary. Jonah's tradition of walking around naked in his room still continued to Jenny's annoyance. Maybe it was time to upgrade his room by moving him in with her, Jenny felt like the time was right.

Mary bounded up the stairs with no effort, her legs had a natural spring to them. When she reached the top, she seamlessly transformed the bouncing into skipping which continued until she reached Jonah's room. She knocked.

No answer.

She knocked again, "Bearman! Breakfast!"

Still, nothing.

"Are you hibernating?" Her head cocked to one side and she frowned. She placed her hand on the door knob, squeezed and turned. Mary opened the door enough for her to put her head through, she examined the contents. Jonah was nowhere to be found. The room was tidy and the bed was made, there was no evidence of anyone staying in the room at all.

The great wooden door to the church was locked again, then again Jonah had never seen it open except for the time the priest had led him in. Jonah pounded his fist against the door, but it barely made a noise, the solid oak door was too massive. He groaned in frustration. For four days now he walked up to the church hoping to confront the old priest, if that was, what he was. But Jonah wasn't quite sure what he was going to say to him. 'Hey priest! You ruined my life!' perhaps.

"Fuck! Where are you, old man?" he leaned on the door with out-stretched arms.

"Still no joy I see," Jenny said.

"Oh hi, where did you come from?" said Jonah. "And no, no joy."

"He'll return"-she put a hand on one of Jonah's arms-"he always does." Jenny ducked under the arm and faced him so Jonah had an arm either side of her. "Breakfast is ready and Mary is worried about you."

"Alright, I'll come back later." Jonah let out a sigh, "Does he usually disappear like this?"

"You make it sound if I know him." Jenny placed her hands on Jonah's large chest. "All I know is that he disappears from time to time, and then he's back, pulling up weeds in his big floppy hat."

Jonah smiled, "Oh god, that hat. I almost forgot."

"So let's just enjoy the peace and quiet while he's gone, shall we?" suggested Jenny.

"I just can't say no to you, can I?"

"Absolutely not. Now let's get moving," she ordered.

"I like it when you're bossy," Jonah leaned in and kissed her on the forehead.

"That's it?" Jenny grabbed the back of Jonah's head, pulled him in, and kissed him on the lips.

Jonah felt a shock and pulled away. His heart beat hard, his vision pulsated, and his skin tingled. He stumbled a little, but his balance returned quickly. Jonah looked around him, and then down at the green below.

"What is it?" Jenny asked.

Jonah's eyes continued to scan the area. "I-I don't know." He felt on edge. He'd had bad feelings before but this was different, the feeling was almost tangible. "I have a feeling."

"What kind of feeling?" asked Jenny.

"I know it sounds like a cliche but, like we're being watched. But it's stronger than that."

"Can you walk? Are you dizzy at all?"

The early disorientation had complete subsided, Jonah's feeling was more of an extra sense than a sickness.

"I'm fine, it'll take a lot more than whatever that was to knock me down."

Jenny grabbed his hand and pulled him down the steps. "Come on, we're going home."

Jack ducked behind the crumbling wall after seeing Jonah's suspicion.

"He knows you're there, Jack."

Jack wasn't easily surprised, but this caught him off guard. The priest shadowed over him.

"Where the hell did you come from, what are you doing here?" Jack said.

"My, my. Aren't you full of questions this early in the morning," Gregory said.

"Duck down, they can see you!"

"They're already gone, Jack."

Jack quickly looked to confirmed they were gone. "Did you feel it? Did you see?"

The priest kept a blank expression, "What?"

Jack peered over the crumbling wall again and saw no sign of the couple. What he felt had also gone and probably best kept to himself. "So, what are you doing here, old man?" Jack asked.

Gregory pointed at the church, "That, Jack, is my church."

"It suits you. Old and ever present." Jack pulled himself up and brushed himself down.

"Hey! I'm not that old," Gregory protested. "Anyway, you forgot colourful," he pointed to the huge window.

Jack stared at it and frowned, it looked as grey and lifeless as most of the people he met on his travels. "So, what did you mean exactly when you said 'he knows I am here?'" He remembered the priest's unorthodox greeting. This priest is sly, he could be playing you again.

"Oh nothing really, he probably saw you."

"You like pissing people off, I can tell," said Jack.

"And you like, how should I put this, playing with people, Jack."

Jack looked around him, he felt uneasy, this priest made him feel uneasy.

"Don't worry," said Gregory. "I'm a fan of your work, Jack. You're different, and so is he." The priest turned his head to where Jonah and Jenny were earlier.

"You are not exactly normal yourself now, are you?" stated Jack.

The priest laughed, "No, you're right. You're both different and you both have a connection. A curse if you will."

"A curse," Jack confirmed. "And who cursed us?"

The priest didn't expect that question. "Maybe you were born with it, but anyway, you've found a way to nullify it. A way to turn misfortune into fortune."

Jack noted how quickly the priest brushed off his last question. Now he knew this priest was trouble, but he played along. "So he does not know how to-"

"No."

"Are you going to tell him?"

"No."

Jack thought for a moment. "But how did he know I was here?"

"Your connection to each other," the priest answered.

Jack now looked annoyed, "Are you just taking me around in circles?"

"Yep."

"Fucking Christ."

Gregory slapped Jack up the side of his head, "Watch your language!"

Jack didn't flinch and just looked at the priest with dead eyes, "Watch your hand, old man."

Gregory moved chest to chest with Jack, he was taller than him, but only by an inch. They continued to stand there, there eyes connected unblinking.

Jack spoke first, "So why did you bring me here?"

"You wanted a challenge? Well now you have one." Gregory again motioned to where Jonah and Jenny had been, "You won't find anyone else like him."

"Yeah, like you said. We were born different."

The priest smiled, backed off and started to walk away. "Oh, and you should probably get a sleeping bag to keep you warm if you're going to sleep rough like that."

"That was you creeping around my car?!" yelled Jack. Then he remembered the cafe, "And you owe me a breakfast!"

The green square looked like a completely different place at night to Jonah. This place now looked foreign, the welcoming trees and soft green grass looked fake, it looked like a set from a terrible horror movie. He was half expecting to see a pale black and white vampire, sporting slick, gelled, black hair combed back tight.

Jonah was still waiting for the priest to show. He made his way up to the massive oak door and saw that it was still shut.

"Fuckin' God damn it!" he slammed a fist down on the stone wall opposite.

"Didn't I tell you to watch your language around here?" said Gregory.

"Gregory! About time you showed your face," Jonah faced the priest.

Where the fuck did he come from?

"No more bullshit, old man, who are you?"

"I've already told you," the priest remained poker-faced.

"You're no priest, that's for damn sure."

"Oh?"

The priest's insistence on being vague was starting to raise Jonah's blood pressure. "Why did you tell Sue about me being here?"

The priest raised an eyebrow, "Told you, did she?"

Jonah didn't hold back, he thrust his hand towards the old man, taking a grip of his neck, and he pinned the priest to the huge church door. Gregory saw the anger in Jonah's eyes.

"No more games, Yoda," Jonah growled. "If you don't leave me- us alone, you will leave me no choice."

The priest remained calm. After a few seconds Gregory smiled.

Jonah reacted, "I'm not joking any more, priest."

"I don't think you understand your position, Jonah." Gregory gripped the hand that gripped his neck, "You seem to be under the impression that you have a choice." The priest squeezed Jonah's hand.

"What the?" said Jonah.

Pain erupted in his fingers and then spread into his arm as Gregory squeezed. Jonah grimaced and tried to release the priest's grip on him, but it was useless. Gregory seemed to have a strength beyond any he had experienced before. The old man pulled Jonah's hand away from his neck, he squeezed a little harder and Jonah found himself starting to kneel.

"Alright, alright!" Jonah protested.

Gregory's voice was deeper now, grander and booming, "Are things becoming a little clearer now?" He squeezed Jonah's hand tighter, something cracked.

"Argh! Clearer? Not really, no!" Jonah cried in pain.

Gregory let him go, Jonah stayed on the floor and nursed his hand.

The priest's voice returned to its normal cadence, "Go and get that looked at, and when I am ready to talk, I'll contact you," he said.

Gregory opened the church door and entered leaving Jonah broken and confused.

The door closed with a deep slam and Jonah looked at it in disbelief. "This is fucking nuts!"

The cold running water from the tap didn't ease Jonah's pain or humiliation. Jenny however didn't care about that and continued to hold the bruised hand in the sink, the swelling didn't seem too bad.

"What's the verdict, nurse? Will I live?" asked Jonah.

"First of all, buddy boy, I don't think a nurse is qualified to answer that. Only a doctor should be diagnosing injuries."

"I think some nurses would disagree."

"Yes well, just because you have a fantasy about a sexy nurse tending to you doesn't mean I become one when you do something stupid," said Jenny.

"But that old man was mean to me, and I really want a sponge bath," Jonah whined.

Jenny ignored the comment, "Are you really going to tell people an old man beat you up?"

She knows who he really is, why haven't you asked her yet? Are you scared?

"Do you know who he really is?" Jonah asked.

"No," she quickly responded.

"He's no old man, that's for sure-"

Go on, say it!

"-In fact I'm not even sure he's a man at all."

That caught Jenny's full attention, "Not human you mean?"

"Maybe."

This alarmed her. "A fucking alien, Jonah?!"

Jonah's eyes looked to the ceiling hoping Mary hadn't been awakened. "I have no idea. It's scary, I know."

"Yes it is. Just please don't say anything to Mary," Jenny said.

"Why would I do that?"

"It's just sometimes you two go off in your own little world together and get carried away. It's not a bad thing, I love how close you two are. But she doesn't need a sibling, she needs a father."

"I hear you loud and clear." Jonah leaned on the sink and looked closely at his hand, "What's the verdict, nurse?"

"It will have to come off."

"That bad?"

"Yep, I'll just go and get the axe from the cellar."

"You have an axe?"

XIX - Horseplay

Maggie lay on the sofa and used Ted's lap as a pillow. "Let's go out a do something today," she said.

Half of Ted's attention was on the morning news, a depressed reporter reported about some pointless local story about over-sized vegetables. Ted's answer resembled a groaning zombie, "Yeah?"

"Would you listen!" Maggie elbowed Ted.

He placed a hand on her arm, "Sorry love, coffee not kicked in yet."

"I was saying let's do something, let's get out of the house," said Maggie.

"Yeah, sure." Ted's eyebrows raised, he was surprised at this suggestion. "Did you have anything in mind?" he asked.

Maggie answered quickly, "Actually yes."

"Oh?"

"You haven't seen Jonah for a few weeks have you?"

Ted frowned, not from annoyance but from confusion. "No. But it looked like he was in good hands."

"Call him, see if he wants to meet up for lunch," Maggie suggested.

Maggie wanted to meet Jonah? Ted thought. It wasn't like her to want to meet new people. Ted did want to keep in touch with Jonah and if Maggie liked him it would certainly help.

"You sure you up for it?" asked Ted.

"Yes, Ted, I'm sure," Maggie said. "I'd like to thank the person that turned my man into a better husband."

"Damn it, where did those two run off to?" Jenny heard a crash and tried to see where it came from. "Oh please don't let that be them." Some voices became audible and a commotion was on the rise not far from where she was standing. Jenny crept forward, looked around the corner, and bore witness to the disaster unfolding. The offending couple came into view, but instead of intervening, she walked away choosing not to get involved.

Jonah lay in a heap with Mary on top. Cans of various vegetables surrounded him, including one with a rather large dent, the one that probably hit him on the head. A few people had gathered around the fallen, but Jonah only noticed one person, that person was now walking away in embarrassment.

"Are you okay, Mary?" said Jonah.

"I think so. What happened?" said Mary.

"Ummm," Jonah tried to recall, "we tripped."

"You mean, you tripped."

"Maybe."

"When you were spinning on one leg."

"Possibly."

"With me in your arms."

"Ah-ha."

"Upside down."

"As I said, slipped, and that's what I'm sticking to." Jonah gave Mary a look and she understood and giggled.

"Are you okay, sir?" a store assistant with a panicked face asked.

Jonah noted the name tag: Kevin. "I slipped," he rubbed his sore head.

Mary started to cry which nearly sent the ginger-haired assistant into shock. "Oh no, I-I'll get the manager." The kid ran off not wanting to get involved in such matters.

Jonah looked over to Mary who stopped crying, and winked.

Jenny heard Mary cry, she stopped what she was doing and looked in their direction, "Mary never cries. What are they up to?"

"And I thought food shopping was dull!" a man said.

Jenny quickly turned to look at him.

"Oh, I am sorry, ma'am. I did not mean to startle you," he said.

"No, it's okay. I've just had my fair share of excitement for one day."

"Sounds interesting. I would love to hear about it."

"It would bore you, I promise, and I do have someone waiting for me." Even though the current man in her life was sometimes more of a child than Mary, she was very happy. This younger man was strangely attractive, but she wanted to make sure he didn't get the wrong message.

"I understand. It was nice to meet you," he offered his hand.

"Jenny," she shook it.

"Jack."

"Hmm?" Gregory balanced on the step ladder holding a feather duster. "What do we have here?" He closed in on the Virgin Mary's face, looked into her eyes, and then closed his. "You're a bold one, that's for sure." He tickled the statue's nose with the duster and then suddenly froze for a moment. "A-choooo!" he sniffed and then wiped his nose on a white handkerchief. Gregory started to hum and then broke into song.

"Say your prayers little one..."

"Bless you!" Jonah said.

"Thank you," replied Mary.

"Where did that come from?"

Mary thought for a second, "My bum!"

"Why you little-" Jonah tickled her sides and Mary burst into laughter unaware of the crowd around them.

They still lay in a heap on the supermarket floor when someone coughed to grab their attention. Jonah stopped tickling Mary and looked up at the confused man.

He looked dead, not thin and skeleton like, but so pale that his complexion was grey. He was short, round, bald, wore glasses and a grey suit, he looked like he took his job far too seriously. The name tag showed that he was the manager of the store. "Excuse me, sir. Are you okay?" he asked.

"Oh yes, thank you," said Jonah. "I just slipped on a wet patch and fell," he lied.

The manager didn't look amused, "Well, you two seem to be in good health, so if you excuse-"

Jonah touch his head, "Ouch!" He picked up the tin of peas that hit him on the head and examined the dent (which he pressed in a little more, making it look like it fell from the height of the Eiffel Tower). "That's quite a lump. I better go to the hospital in case I have concussion."

The manager sighed and forced a smile, "I do apologise. Of course we will compensate you for any harm that may have been done."

The loud laughter of a child startled Jenny, she quickly recognised the voice and the reason for it.

"What are they do-"

"Are they with you?" Jack asked.

"Uh? No, I don't think so." It was starting to get harder to hide the embarrassment.

"Sounds like they are having fun."

"A little too much fun, if you ask me."

"I did not realise you could have too much fun." He was finding it harder to hide his amusement.

"There's a time and place, and this is not it."

"I see."

"And grown men should not run around the streets after being dressed and made up by an 8 year old girl."

"Around the streets you say?"

Jenny just realised what she was saying, "oh, sorry. Please forget I just said that."

"Ha ha. Of course."

"Well it was nice to meet you, Jack, but I have to go."

"Sure thing, but before you go," Jack moved a little closer to Jenny, "I'm visiting someone close by. Do you know where Enville is?"

"...Exit light. Enter night. Take my hand!"

Gregory dusted the statue's chest. "We're off to never never land."

Gregory paused.

"What are you up to, Jack?"

You've been more like a stalker than a killer lately.

Footsteps echoed through the church. The doors were locked so Gregory knew it wasn't someone local.

"Let me guess," said the priest. "Jesus."

"Giving my mother a good rub I see, you always were very fond of her." Jesus walked to the base of the Virgin Mary and leaned on it.

Gregory looked down at him. "Nice suit, last time I saw you, you looked like a cowboy-"

"And you went to sea," said Jesus. "I still don't understand why you moved on from America, you seemed to be having fun there."

Gregory found it a little difficult to see Jesus in the dim church, his suit was black, his shirt was black, his tie was black, he was black.

"I'm surprised you stayed," said Gregory. "Even after the ordeal of being crucified you decided to come back for more. Then you stay in the U.S. during THAT time." -the priest pointed the duster at Jesus- "I'm beginning to think you're a masochist."

Jesus clapped, "Ah man, it's good to see you again." He put his hands on his hips. "Would you stop dusting Mary's tits and get down here!"

Gregory eased himself down off the step ladder and hugged Jesus. They patted each other's backs and Gregory led them to the closest pew where they sat.

"So," said Jesus. "Have you seen anyone else recently?"

"Nope, not a single one of em'"

"Really? Not even Odin? You guys were tight."

"I'm sure they've got their own little projects," said Gregory. "Just like me. What about you?"

"Yeah, I hung out with someone for a while until about fifty years ago."

"Who?" Gregory asked.

"Aphrodite."

The priest looked at Jesus and studied him for a few seconds. "You didn't," said Gregory.

"What?" said Jesus.

"You did, didn't you."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

Gregory shook his head in disapproval, "You've always had a soft spot for her."

Jesus just smiled and remembered something, the smile disappeared.

Gregory continued, "So, why are you here, Jesus?"

The large arms of the large man were crossed and the manager felt very insignificant in the shadow of Jonah. No wonder, he thought, that the little girl seemed very secure around him.

"A fifty pound voucher?" Jonah asked.

"D-did I say fifty? I meant one hundred," coward Dave the manager. He needed this to be over quickly.

"Thank you, Dave." Jonah offered his hand and Dave reluctantly shook it. He looked a little relieved when he found that Jonah had a gentle touch, he was even more relieved that Jonah had taken the offer. Dave left to retrieve the vouchers.

Jonah looked at Mary, she spoke without looking at him, "You're a bad bear."

"Now, now. Don't judge me just yet."

"Buy me a treat," she demanded.

"Blackmail? And you say I'm a bad bear!"

The supermarket suddenly blurred and shook, but only to Jonah. That feeling had returned, the feeling of being watched, and this time it was much, much stronger. He felt dizzy and Mary noticed his attention drifted to somewhere else.

"Bearman?"

He didn't answer. His senses were bombarded: noises, smells, and even his skin became hyper sensitive. He felt the temperature drop a fraction when the supermarket doors opened, he could now smell milk past its prime located in the back room, and he could hear the checkout staff conversing with the customers from the other end of the building. Finally a voice came into focus, a voice he knew: "Well it was nice to meet you, Jack, but I should go."

"Jenny?" Jonah muttered. He listened to more: "Oh sure, but before you go. I'm visiting someone close by. Do you know where Enville is?"

A terrible screeching sound filled his ears and Jonah fell to his knees, he pressed the sides of his head to try and block the sound.

Mary looked panicked, "What's the matter?!" she touched his arm which was still sensitive.

"Ah, ha ha haa!" Jonah was as surprised as Mary when he laughed, but he couldn't help it. Mary's touch tickled him tremendously, even though he'd never been ticklish. She took her hand away and gradually his senses calmed and returned to normal.

"Bearman? You're scaring me."

He opened his eyes and saw a scared little girl. "It's alright, Mary. I'm okay now," said Jonah.

"What happened?" she asked.

"A sudden headache. That's all."

"You scared me."

"I'm sorry." Jonah drew Mary close to him and hugged her, "That's never happened before, I was scared too. But I'm okay now."

"Will it happen again?"

"I don't know," but he knew who to ask. "Do you think I should see the doc?"

Mary nodded.

"Me too kiddo."

Dave the manager had returned and waved £100 in store vouchers at him. "Again, sir, I apologise for any harm or inconvenience. I'll personally-"

"Please, don't worry about it," Jonah took the vouchers, "and thank you."

Dave smiled and left, another employee turned up and started re-shelving the cans knocked from their place.

"Shall we see what your Auntie Jenny is up to?" Jonah asked.

Mary nodded so furiously that Jonah thought that her head might fall off.

"Not many of us left now, is there?"

Gregory stood up, "Don't worry, I don't plan on going anywhere."

"Who's worried?" Jesus joined him. "I know you're up to something, Gregory."

"What are you rambling on about now?"

"I didn't forget ya know. All that nonsense you spouted about humans." Jesus looked up, "You earned your name that's for sure. They won't surpass us."

"I never said they would!" said Gregory. He let the words settle before speaking again. "Are you planning on going anywhere yet?"

Jesus breathed heavily, "Maybe. I'm not sure. But I'll come see you first."

"You better. It was good to see you again, old friend."

"Don't forget what I told you," said Jesus. "Watch your back."

They shook hands and Gregory headed back to the Virgin Mary statue, Jesus headed to the massive oak door, and walked through it.

"Auntie!" Mary became one with Jenny's leg.

Jenny hadn't moved since Mary had last seen her, she was still next to the fruit & veg examining tomatoes.

"There you are!" said Jenny.

Jack bent down, "Well hello there, I am Jack."

Mary didn't say anything, she hid behind the leg and hugged it a little tighter.

"Don't be rude, Mary, say hello," Jenny said.

"Hello," the word was only just audible.

Jack straightened up and found Jonah towering next to him. Jack looked up to Jonah's face and made eye contact through Jonah's scruffy long hair. Jack stayed cool and calm, "Ah, you must be here with Jenny. I am Jack." He offered his hand and Jonah took it firmly and shook. The lights in the supermarket flickered, which made Jenny jump.

"Jonah," he said with a deep voice that resembled a growl.

Jenny felt the intensity between them and welcomed Jonah's protectiveness. Jonah felt a different intensity however, he felt it in the supermarket only moments ago, and at the church when he thought he was being watched. Time seemed to slow, his senses increased in sensitivity. This Jack was emitting the signal, he was the cause, but Jonah didn't know why. The lights in the supermarket continued to flicker.

Something moved below Jonah, something dark. He looked to the ground and saw Jack's shadow. It wasn't the shadow of a man, it was the shadow of a monster. Jonah blinked and the shadow returned to Jack, the lights in the supermarket stopped flickering, and his perception of the world returned to normal.

Jonah turned to Jenny, "Are you ready? We need to get going."

"Um, yeah. I think so," Jenny said checking her list.

"It was nice to meet you, Jack." Jonah ushered Jenny and Mary away.

Jack didn't reply, he just watched them checkout and leave. "Jonah, my brother, when we touched, my heart skipped a beat."

The priest stood at the altar with his arms outstretched. "At last! I have my knight!" The word knight seemed to echo for an eternity before the thick brick walls swallowed it. Gregory faced the Virgin Mary. "Thank you, my dear. You have been most helpful." The priest bowed to her, turned on one heel, and jumped down from the alter. With the grace of a ballerina, he twirled down the aisle towards the exit leaving the building without opening a door.

"So are you going to tell me what's going on or what?" Jenny asked.

Jonah tried to rush them to the car.

"I'm not sure myself, but what I do know is that Jack is a very dangerous man. I need to talk to the priest."

"Jack? Are you sure? He seemed nice. He's visiting some-"

"Trust me, he's not what he seems."

Jenny chose to go off topic, "Okay, forget Jack. Tell me about that crashing sound, the laughter, and those vouchers."

"Oh damn!" Jonah did a one-eighty and headed back towards the store, "Hang on!"

Jenny and Mary watched on as Jonah walked up to a homeless man and handed over the vouchers.

Jenny was not quite sure what had happen, but Mary fully understood. "Good, Bearman," Mary said.

The lingering dread still occupied Jonah's thoughts as they approached Enville. He'd been silent for the entire journey, which worried Jenny. "What is wrong with you two? Normally I can't shut you up!" said Jenny.

Mary could hardly keep her eyes open and Jonah was still deep in thought, he gazed at the fields beyond the hedgerows. "I'm getting that feeling again," he said.

"What feeling?"

"That feeling before something bad happens."

"Well, can it wait?" asked Jenny.

"What? Why?" said Jonah.

"Oh, just the small detail of Ted and Maggie coming over for dinner."

Jack watched in the darkness. He stay out of sight in the shadows and still as a predatory cat. He watched Ted and Maggie arrive. He watched them have a good time, he watched them eat, he watched them play, Jacked watched as Ted and Maggie left and drove away. Jack returned to his car nearby, he started the engine and followed his prey.

XX - Godsmacked

The sun wasn't up yet, but that didn't bother Maureen, it was time to get up and take her dog, Chaps, for his daily walk. Chaps dragged old Maureen to the nearby park as usual, she removed the tennis ball from her coat pocket and threw it with the aid of a ball launcher, Chaps chased it and returned the ball to her. Chaps squatted and defecated, Maureen took out a baggy and cleaned up after him as usual. Daylight emerged as they played, the early morning exercise tired Maureen and Chaps and so they headed back to their home. Most of the houses on their street had a tree in the front garden, some were small and complemented the gardens, but some were huge and unkempt and dominated, even blocked, the view. As Maureen and Chaps passed the trees, birdsong greeted them. Chaps stopped and barked, he barked at one particular tree. It was a large tree and a large branch hung low over the path to the front door. Chaps barked at two bodies hanging from the branch. Maureen saw the bodies, she saw the blood, and then she keeled over clutching her chest.

The TV sparked into life. Mary gripped the remote and bounced onto the sofa, her eyes were already fixed on the screen. She was about to change the channel when Jonah walked in and stood between Mary and the TV, he looked at her seriously.

"Did you eat your breakfast?" he asked her.

"Yep!" she barked.

"Did you wash?"

"Yep!"

"Did you brush your teeth?"

"Yep!"

The news anchor yapped away in the background, a few words caught Jonah's ears: Murder, Theodore, Maggie. He turned to face the TV and watched. Jonah couldn't believe his eyes and ears. Ted and Maggie, they were dead, they had been murdered.

"I wanna watch telly, Bearman!" shouted Mary.

"Shush," Jonah raised a hand, "please Mary, I need to listen to this."

Mary pouted, but Jonah didn't see, he was fixed to the news. They continued to talk about where Ted worked and that, not long ago, another employee had died, had committed suicide.

Jonah quickly changed the channel so Mary wouldn't see, he flopped down onto the sofa beside her, "This can't be happening," he said.

Oh it can, and you KNEW it would.

"What's the matter?" Mary asked.

He didn't say anything. Jonah pulled Mary in close and hugged her. He felt it, yet he did nothing. Once again he'd let everything carry on as normal until the inevitable happened.

"Did something bad happen?"

Jonah swallowed, "Yes Mary, it did."

"Will something bad happen to us?"

Absolutely it will, you will ALL die.

Jonah pushed Mary away so he could look her in the eyes. "No, I promise," Jonah said. "I would never let anything happen to you."

Jenny was leaning on the door frame leading to the kitchen, "Because we have the great and mighty Bearman to protect us," she announced.

Mary giggled.

"Jonah?" Jenny said. "Could you give me a hand for a minute?"

"Yeah, sure." He winked at Mary and she giggled again.

Jonah pulled himself off the sofa and left Mary to her cartoons. Jenny closed the door so they could talk.

"What's happened?" she asked.

"It's Ted and his wife. They're dead."

"What? How?" she covered her mouth with her hand in shock. They'd just had a lovely night together and couldn't fathom how they could have been killed.

"My hunch?" Jonah didn't want to admit this, "It was Jack."

Jenny processed this for a few seconds, "How could you possibly-"

"Know?" Jonah held her, "I can feel it. Him. Jack. Every time he is close, I can sense him."

Jenny frowned, "Since when?"

"Remember when I said it felt like we were being watched up by the church door?"

"Yeah?"

"I got that feeling again, but much much stronger when we met Jack in the supermarket," said Jonah.

"Why didn't you say anything?" asked Jenny.

"I don't know what these things happening to me are, or what they mean." Jonah thought about how Ted and Maggie were put out on display. "Shit."

"What is it?" Jenny asked.

"Jack, it was a message from Jack," said Jonah.

"What was?"

"He hung Ted and Maggie from a tree outside their home, he's taunting me."

Jenny covered her mouth again, but then grabbed both of Jonah's arms. "But why? What does he want?"

"I don't know," Jonah admitted.

"Fucking Gregory!" she exploded.

"You think it's his doing?" Jonah knew it was. He was sick of the priest's vagueness, Jonah had to get to the truth whether he liked the answers or not. "I'm going to figure this out. I can't believe I have to find that priest again."

"Go find him," Jenny said, "and kick him in the nuts for me."

"As much as I dislike that old man, I don't know if I can kick a priest in the nuts."

Because you're scared of him!

Jenny put her hands on her hips, "Fine, you can go back to sleeping in the spare room again."

Jonah sighed, "Fine. I'll kick a priest in the nuts."

The great rolling countryside passed Jonah by. He needed to clear his head in the wake of this mornings events. He wouldn't be able to attend the funeral, there would be a number of ex-work colleagues attending, and the last thing he wanted was to cause more grief even though he was innocent.

Jonah was seething, boiling inside, engulfed in distress at the killing of Ted and his wife. The temperature in the car raised and Jonah cracked open a window when he notice they started to fog.

Summer felt like it had begun, it was warm and bright, only a few clouds floated around in the big blue. Jonah now drove with the window fully open, his arm dangled out which diverted some fresh air into the car.

He had questions: Who the hell had told Jack about them? Is this who Jack is, a killer? Why is Jack doing this? And most importantly, is the priest involved? Jonah's hunch is that he was, may be he was to blame for everything bad that happened in Jonah's life.

His visit to the church earlier had been an unsuccessful one, which was no surprise to Jonah. Gregory had a knack for not being around when he was needed. So Jonah just drove; he drove in no particular direction, passing field after field. He was starting to get hungry.

A cafe popped out of nowhere. It was elevated compared to the road and looked like it could fall over at any moment. Jonah parked the car and approached the rectangular, white, wooden building.

He entered and looked around. "Son of a bitch!" said Jonah.

The priest heard his voice, looked around, and smiled. "Well look what the cat dragged in!"

Jonah sat down where Jack had sat before, "So this is where you hide, is it?"

"Hide? I never hide." Gregory sipped at his tea.

"I need answers." Jonah recalled their last meeting, "I felt my hand break when you squeezed it, but a few hours later, it was fine."

"That's your most pressing question?" the priest was amused.

"It's one of many, old man."

"Fine," said Gregory. He placed his cup of tea on the saucer. "I un-broke it just before I let go. I need you in good shape so I just left it a little bruised."

This left Jonah with more questions, but compare to everything that was going on, it was minor. "Okay, not like that's even possible," said Jonah. "But if you're capable of that, then who the fuck are you?"

"This again?" said the priest.

"No more bullshit," Jonah lightly hit the table with his fist. "I want to know who you really are and where-"

"A god," Gregory said, "I am. A god."

Jonah rubbed his face with both hands, "You're God."

"No, not God. A. God."

"And who decided that?" asked Jonah.

"Decided?" Gregory was puzzled at the question. "No one decides to become, or who becomes a god, my boy." The priest took a sip of his tea, "Look, maybe I'm exaggerating a little, but you humans do see us that way."

"Oh please don't you dare say you're an alien next." Jonah felt battered and beaten in a match where no punches were thrown.

"Well, no. We were here first."

"Oh really."

"Right," said Gregory. "Name some gods. Right now, and I'll tell you if they exist or not."

"Okay, I'll play along." Jonah thought for a second. "Thor."

"Real."

"Zeus."

"Yep."

"Ra."

"Real."

"You're just gonna tell me they're all real, aren't you," said Jonah.

"Loki isn't," Gregory leaned in a little. "Look, most of the famous characters in religious folklore are gods, Jesus being the most famous. He came to see me just the other day."

"Wow, I feel lucky just being near you!" said Jonah. "But tell me this: is Gregory your real name? I mean, it's not exactly a name that comes up a lot, if at all, when gods are discussed."

"Oh I'm there. Well, I'm know as The Grigory, the eighth order of angels."

Jonah just looked at Gregory with a blank expression.

"No? Never heard of The Watchers?" said the priest.

"No," said Jonah.

"Of course not." Gregory felt a little deflated but he wanted to see how much Jonah would accept. "Anyway, we evolved well before humanity came along and many of our people left Earth to explore the galaxy. Technology far beyond your imagination gave us abilities and eternal life, and those who remained here agreed to lay low to watch humanity flourish, to learn from them."

Jonah was obviously starting to get lost, but Gregory was now having fun so he carried on. "As you can imagine it was getting hard to keep ourselves entertained, so some of the guys started, how should I put it, started to misbehave."

"What?" said Jonah.

"Well, the easiest example would be Jesus. He just had to reveal himself and show off. And don't get me started with Hercules!"

"Okay stop. You're giving me a headache," Jonah rubbed his temple. He needed something easier to tackle. He did hear everything Gregory just said, but it just seemed to bounce off him, he couldn't absorb it. "Can you tell me who Jack is?" he asked.

Gregory smiled, "Oh that's easy. Your destiny."

"Mother fucker!" Jonah's fist hit the table hard this time.

An ageing woman appeared next to them, "Sir? Can you not yell and please watch your language."

"Oh, I'm sorry, miss," said the priest. "He's had some rather bad news today."

"Can I get you anything?" she asked.

Jonah scanned the menu, "A BLT please, and a pot of tea. Thank you."

"Coming right up," said the waitress and she left.

"Bad news is an understatement," Jonah said. "And I don't need you to apologise for me."

"Fine, I just thought it would sound more sincere coming from a priest," Gregory said.

"Anyway, you-pain-in-the-ass," Jonah continued. "Can't you give me a straight answer?"

Gregory recalled their conversation before the interruption, "Not a believer in destiny, Jonah?"

"Does it matter?"

"What matters, Jonah, is what you believe-"

"Here we go."

"-Do you have a destiny? Do you only have one purpose in life? I know it's asking YOU a lot. But, the question of whether we have a destiny, is a personal one. Don't you think?"

"What I'm thinking, old man, is how can so much shit come out of one mouth?" said Jonah.

Gregory's calm was starting to waver, "Don't push it, Jonah. I won't take your ignorance forever."

Jonah sighed, he was tired, "Fine." He needed an answer, any answer, "Why is Jack my destiny?"

"You have the ability to save people," Gregory said. "Jack, kills people."

"So it's true, isn't it. He killed Ted and Maggie," Jonah's eyes sparkled. "Can I save them?"

"No. It's too late for them."

Jonah slumped in his seat.

"The time will come," the priest said.

"What do you mean by that?"

"You, my knight, will face Jack. And kill him."

"Bullshit! You can't possibly know all this," yelled Jonah. "And stop calling me your knight, it makes you sound like a damsel in distress."

The ageing woman dropped a plate onto the table, the BLT sandwich looked like it had a sword fight with the chef and lost. Then she put down the pot of tea and a cup and saucer. The waitress asked Gregory if he wanted anything, but he declined and the waitress left them alone again.

"I'll leave you to digest what I have told you today," said Gregory.

"Was anything you said true?" asked Jonah.

"Um," Gregory looked up and tried to remember everything he'd just told him. "I think so, yes."

Jonah picked up half his sandwich, bits of bacon, lettuce, and tomato fell to the plate leaving that half of the sandwich only half filled. "Do you know how annoying you are?"

"Oh yes." Gregory left his seat. "Enjoy your slashed sandwich."

Jonah took a bite, "Oh, if you run into Jenny, tell her I kicked you in the nuts."

Confusion was becoming a too familiar companion to Jonah. As usual, he felt none-the-wiser after questioning the priest. Just more nonsense about saving people, gods, knights, and now, destiny.

Jonah was outside the cafe heading to his car. He saw someone between him and his vehicle, someone, he was told, that he'd kill, and Jonah hadn't sensed him this time.

"We meet again!" said Jack.

Jonah remained calm until he was within reach. He grabbed Jack by the throat with one hand and slammed him down on the front on the car. Jonah's power overwhelmed Jack, he absorbed it; he revelled in it.

"You seem angry, Jonah!" Jack struggled to say.

Jonah's voice thundered, "You murdered my friend!" He punched Jack in the face.

"What? The shrink?" said Jack. Jonah punched him again, Jack wasn't sure he could take another but continued to joke anyway. "Or was it the fat guy?"

"You know full well!" Jonah bellowed, "Ted and his wife!" He dragged Jack off the car bonnet and held him up with both hands gripping Jack's shirt.

"Ah, I did not know-"

"Bullshit!" Jonah thrust a knee into Jack's abdomen.

Jack coughed and struggled to breathe. "But the priest did."

Jonah released him and looked to the cafe. A few people had taken note of the conflict. Jack doubled over, rubbed his neck with one hand and covered his stomach with the other.

"The priest told you to do this?" asked Jonah.

"Not exactly," admitted Jack. "He just gave me information."

That priest has been playing Jack as well as you!

"He gives me information too," Jonah said.

Jack straightened up and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He looked at the small amount of blood. "Oh yeah? What like?"

"He told me, I'd kill you," said Jonah.

Jack smiled, "That is a bit dark!" He looked over to the cafe as well. "I will be on my way then. It seems I have caught you in a bad mood."

"You think I'm just gonna let you leave?" said Jonah.

"Yes I do, a scream from me and those dining in the cafe will be calling the police in a jiffy."

Jonah looked and saw that Jack was right.

Someone opened the door and yelled, "Is there a problem over there? Should I call the cops?"

Jonah walked to his car furious.

Jack put up a hand to the curious diner, "No thank you, just a sibling squabble!"

Jonah jumped in the car and left, gravel kicked up in his wake. Jack nursed his abdomen and leaned on his car feeling a little bruised.

Red mist descended on Jonah.

Gregory has to die too, you know that right?

Jonah boiled over, he revved the engine and sped down the road too fast. He growled and screamed and punched the roof. "I'll kill them both!"

XXI - Rolling Thunder

Everything was dark except a pathway lined with the orange glow of street lamps. Below, the floor was perfectly smooth and matt black, above was out of reach and infinite. Distance couldn't be judged in the darkness so the only inevitable way forward was to the orange light.

Jonah walked forward, each lamp dimmed and faded as he past. He could see no end in sight.

"Bearman?" Mary's voice whispered from the darkness.

He looked around him: behind, just blackness, only forward did the path continued.

"Mary?" Jonah called.

No answer.

Every lamp shut off.

"Hello?" said Jonah.

"Jonah?" Jenny answered.

"Where are you?" asked Jonah.

"Jonah... Jonah... JONAH!"

The floor lit up white and Jonah's shadow was cast across it. The shadow moved although Jonah didn't. One end remained connected at his feet, the shadow shortened, then rotated around Jonah, then it elongated into the distance before returning to normal again. The shadow shivered, and then it shuddered violently and morphed into a shape, a shape that could only be described as monstrous. The floor went black and Jonah was blind in the darkness.

A blood curdling scream filled the void and as the echo faded the street lamp lined path eased into life once more.

Jonah felt different so he looked at himself. He was naked, he was wet, he was wet with blood from head to toe. The blood dripped to the floor where it merged and disappeared into the blackness.

An orange street lamp shut off in the distance. Then another, and another. One at a time the lamps failed until there was only one left.

Jonah stood alone, naked, and covered in blood under the orange glow of a single street lamp.

Then the lamp died.

"Jonah?"

"Mmm..."

"Jonah?" Jenny said, "Are you awake?"

"Hmm?" he moaned.

"I think you were having a nightmare."

Jonah felt her soft lips on his, "That was nice," he said as he reached for her. It wasn't just her lips that were soft.

"Oi!" she protested. "Those are not there to relieve your stress."

Jonah gentle squeezed the breast, "But they work so well."

Jenny lifted the bed sheets a little and looked at Jonah's naked body. She dropped the sheets and ran a hand across his chest and then down his abdomen.

"Well, I guess Mary won't be up for a while yet."

She climbed on top of him.

Rays of sun shot down from the woodland tree-line, life kept itself hidden from the hairy man strolling beneath it. There were no paths, no directions, and no signs of any civilisation.

Jonah wasn't exactly sure why he had entered the woods, all he knew is that he wanted to think and he just walked where his legs took him. Now he was possibly lost.

A large beam of sunlight illuminated a fallen tree, moss, fungi, and various other flora grew from its trunk. Jonah sat on the ground and leaned back on the tree, he thought about his nightmare, and he thought about his murdered friend. Jonah thought about Sue, about his ex-wife Jess, and he thought about his ex-fiance Carla. Jonah thought about everyone in his past until he thought about his father, he wanted to stop thinking because he knew where it would lead. Then Jonah cried.

"God damn it!" Jonah said as he left the police station.

Gregory stopped the out-swinging door before it hit him and surprised Jonah. "What did you expect?"

"What? So now you're gonna show up when I don't need you?" Jonah bounced down the stone steps away from the station's entrance. "I tried to tell them about Jack," he said.

"I know," said Gregory.

"Of course you did."

"What's Jack full name?" Gregory asked.

"I dunno."

"Where does he live?"

"Yes, yes, they already beat that dead horse. I get it." Jonah hadn't pushed his luck in the police station, he didn't want to become a suspect himself.

"You look grumpy, let's go for a drink," said Gregory.

"I'm driving."

"I'll pay for a taxi, come on."

Jonah grew suspicious. "Okay? Do you have somewhere in mind?"

"In fact I do."

The pub where Jonah met Sue was empty except for two twenty-something males in the corner.

"You're sick," said Jonah. "You know that, right?"

"Here you go, Father Gregory," the barman said while placing the beer on the bar.

Jonah frowned. "How does he know you? I used to be a regular here and don't remember seeing you."

"As you said, you used to be a regular," said Gregory. "I must've started coming in here after you stopped."

A flash came over Jonah. "This is where you told her about me and Jenny, wasn't it."

Gregory took a big gulp of ale and didn't answer. He could see Jonah putting the pieces together.

"I ought to kill you where you stand," Jonah said whilst poking the priest with his free hand.

The priest squinted at Jonah.

"You also told that psycho about Ted, didn't you," Jonah continued.

Still the priest drank his beer.

"Why did you bring me here, old man?"

Finally Gregory spoke, "Good question! Let's sit down and talk."

The daylight dimmed, large grey clouds rolled in and rain began to fall. Jonah watched from his chair in the pub.

"Looks quite the storm," Gregory said.

"Storm?" said Jonah. "It's only rain."

"Give it a minute."

"One of your powers is it?"

"What is?"

"Predicting the weather."

A clap of thunder shook the pub and Gregory smiled to himself.

"Alright, smart arse," Jonah said.

"Looks to be heading for Enville."

"Oh really!" Jonah was feeling fed up with all the none-answers. "Would you please just fucking be straight with me!"

The priest looked Jonah in the eye, "This storm has been brewing for awhile now."

"What are you talking about?" asked Jonah. "Did you or did you not tell Jack about Ted?"

"I. Did. Not." Gregory was surprised Jonah hadn't figured it out yet. "It didn't occur to you that he might have followed you home from the supermarket after you met?"

Jonah thought before speaking, "How did you know-"

"Come on Jonah, I'm a god," said Gregory.

"Fine. So Jack followed us home, then what?" Jonah felt cold all of a sudden, his blood drained to his feet, fear took a hold of him. "What did you do?" Jonah grabbed the priest with both hands.

"We're doing this again?" Gregory said.

"I'm done with your riddles, old man!"

"For a smart man, you really are dull."

"It's Jack isn't it."

"Oh there it is, that's the spark," said Gregory.

He let the priest go and faced the window. "Where is he?"

"Do you really need to ask?"

Jonah slowly turned to face Gregory, "You! You led him to us," his eyes searched for the answers, "to me, to Jenny," everything came into focus, "to Enville."

Jonah ran from the pub, he ran to his car as fast as his legs could carry him. Horrible thoughts filled his head.

A photo of Ted and Maggie hugging each other displayed on Jenny's phone. She didn't want to look at it and pressed a button. A video played: Mary had taken the phoned and recorded them playing Monopoly, there was lots of laughing, lots of wine, and lots of food. The video ended so Jenny hit next and another video started. They were all seated getting ready to watch a movie, Jonah asked Mary to switch off the light and to stop recording. Mary switched off the light, the video went dark except for the street lamp showing through the window, then the video stopped.

Jenny put the phone down. "Mary dear?" Jenny called out from the kitchen.

The TV held Mary's gaze, "Yes, auntie?"

"Can you check around upstairs for dirty dishes for me please."

"Okay!" Mary pounced off the sofa and ran upstairs.

Jenny smiled, "Such a good girl." Something itched in her brain.

She left the sink and stepped into the living room and searched for anything else that needed washing.

Window.

Rain hit the windows followed by a distant rumble of thunder.

Mary returned and handed over two mugs, "Found these!"

"Thank you, sweetheart," she patted Mary on the head. "You can go back to your cartoons."

Mary bounced onto the sofa and re-engaged the TV.

Street lamp.

Jenny entered the kitchen and headed back to the sink. She washed up the few remaining mugs.

Man.

Jenny quickly dried her hands on a tea towel and grabbed her phone. She played the last video she saw and paused it just before it ended. Jenny pinched out to zoom in on the window which now filled the screen. The street lamp was not alone, the orange glow illuminated someone below it, someone that appeared to be looking right at her.

"Quite the helpful child you have there," said Jack.

Jenny let out a yelp and dropped the phone in the sink. "Jack? Where did you-"

"Come from?"

She nodded, her eyes darted to the living room.

"Oh, I have been watching you and Jonah play happy families for a while now," said Jack as he took tiny steps towards her.

"Why are you here, Jack?" asked Jenny.

"You know," said Jack, "a shrink asked me that very same question once."

"Yeah? How did you answer?" asked Jenny.

"With a knife," answered Jack.

"I think I see the problem," Jenny edged closer to the knife block.

"I can see what you are doing."

"What do you want, Jack?"

A louder rumble of thunder boomed, the rain hit a little heavier.

"I want to bring you misfortune," said Jack.

"W-was it you?" Jenny trembled.

Jack tilted his head. "Was what me?"

"Ted and Maggie, last night."

"Oh this is boring, I have already had this conversation with Jonah," Jack said.

"Bullshit, he would have pulverised you," said Jenny.

Jack almost laughed. "He did try, but he got distracted." Jack paused. "That priest is an interested man."

Jenny's eyes widened. "Fucking Gregory-"

"Oh, you know him? Well whatever, I have some blood to spill," said Jack.

Panic took hold of Jenny and she started to cry, "Please, don't hurt Mary."

"For my life to become worth living, you all have to die," Jack explained. "Something that Jonah has apparently not figured out yet."

"What? I don't understand?"

"Jonah and I are the same," Jack explained. "We are both unlucky in life, but I figured out how to negate said bad luck." Jack closed in on Jenny. "I gave my misfortune to other people. Death, torture, retribution. I have done it all."

Jenny covered her mouth to try and silence her fear, "Please. Don't."

A voice called from the living room, "Auntie?"

"I'm okay, hun!" Jenny's eyes darted to the door and back to Jack again. "Stay there and watch telly!"

The door to the living room opened and there stood a confused little girl.

Jack ran and took hold of Mary, Jenny screamed, "Get your fuckin' hands off her!"

The car cut through the heavy rain, flashes of lightning lit up the sky, thunder clapped, Jonah stared at the road ahead with laser-like focus. The afternoon was dark due to the storm, the windscreen wipers failed to keep up with the rain, but Jonah kept his foot down.

Slow the fuck down! You're going to crash!

I have to save them!

You should have killed him back at the cafe!

Then I'd be in jail, how would that have helped?

So you'd rather them be dead than you in jail?

NO!

I told you they were going to die!

I'm going to save them.

You keep telling yourself that.

The priest said I can save people.

And you believe him?

I have to.

And why is that?

Because I have nothing else.

You have me.

You are me.

And we make a great couple.

If it was just you and me left, I fear we'd be more of a monster than Jack.

We'd be a god.

...

I have to save them.

He reached Enville and parked outside Jenny's cottage. Jonah ran inside, "Jenny!" he called. "Mary!"

He checked the whole building but they were nowhere to be found. Jonah sat on the sofa to think, but he didn't have to think for long. He ran from the cottage and headed for the church. Jonah came to a stop in the middle of the green, the rain fell heavy on his shoulders, his clothes were soaked through. A flash of lightning revealed the small door next to the foot of the steps. It was open.

"Found you," Jonah said.

He looked up to the church and saw a new image in the stained-glass window. An image resembling Jonah was at its centre, the purples, greens, and blues had all gone, they had been replaced by shades of yellow and orange. This huge arch shaped window now pictured a silhouette of Jonah, on fire.

"He knows you're coming," said Gregory who was standing behind Jonah.

"Everything bad in my life, was that because of you?" asked Jonah.

"Everything? No. But you have bigger fish to fry right now, don't you think?"

"What about this other me I hear in my head?"

"Don't let it control you, that's all you need to know," said the priest.

"WHAT IS IT!"

"It's something we've been fighting for a long time. A Demon."

"Gods and Demons, huh. Figures. He has one as well, doesn't he." Jonah looked to the open door, "Ready or not, Jack," he said. "Here I come."

XXII - The Otherside

The passageway was dimly lit by the occasional overhead light. The red brick walls curved in and arched over Jonah, the floor was rough and uneven, cement crumbled underfoot. The dim lights provided little illumination, he was reminded of a recent dream, a nightmare. Faint noises echoed in the distance but he couldn't understand them. Jonah walked.

An echo grew louder, someone called to him softly, "Jonah?"

Silence.

A woman's voice shouted, "Jonah!"

Jonah spun to see a woman standing next to him, Jonah fell to the floor and when he looked back up she disappeared.

"Mom?" uttered Jonah, but he wasn't sure. He calmed himself, "It's that fuckin' priest!"

Jonah brushed himself down and continued down the passageway. More voices echoed, he knew them.

"Jonah, my boy, why do you ignore me?" a voice said.

"Because, dad," said Jonah, "you stole and married my fiance." Jonah didn't stop walking, "Oh, and you dropped me on my head, and crashed a car which nearly paralysed me. Do I need to go on?"

"Why didn't you love me?" asked Sue.

"I know this is you, priest, you can stop these silly little tricks."

Jonah felt something in his hand. He open it and looked at the bloody dismembered finger in his palm.

"Good trick!" Jonah said. "Is that Mattie's or Mark's?"

"You were the worst," said Jess.

"Oh, now you've done it, old man." Jonah's patience had gone, "After I'm done with Jack, I'm coming after you."

Jonah walked into something solid, the passageway had ended. A closed wooden door prevented him from going any further. He heard voices on the other side. Jonah pressed an ear to the door and listened.

"There you go, all strapped in," said Jack. "Shall we begin?"

Jonah's eyes widened, he stepped back and kicked door. Wood splintered and gave, the door flew open.

Jenny was lying on her back gagged and strapped to a gurney, Jack looked down on her face. Then Jonah saw Mary, she was also strapped to a matching gurney on the opposite side to Jack. The wheeled stretchers formed a 'V' shape and Jack was at the point at the other end of the room.

"Jonah, my friend!" said Jack.

"We're not friends, Jack."

"But we are brothers."

"Oh, I don't think so," said Jonah.

"But we are the same, do you not see?"

"I see alright, you're delusional."

"Come on now, what else could I have done?" Jack said.

Jonah started to inch his way towards Jack. "You could have not killed them."

"And had a life like yours? No thanks." Jack saw Jonah was completely clueless. "You still do not get it, do you?"

"Get what?" asked Jonah.

Jack faced Jonah head on and placed a hand on the nearest corner of each stretcher. "Your misfortune, your bad luck, your curse. It could be nullified, negated, by simply giving it to somebody else."

"By killing people?!" Jonah took another step closer. "I don't even think we have a curse, Jack. I believe it's that damn priest and his god like powers he says he has."

"God like powers, you say?" said Jack. "And what are those may I ask?"

"He says he's a god, did he not tell you that?" asked Jonah.

"I will make sure I will ask the next time I see him."

"There won't be a next time, Jack," said Jonah.

"Come on now, I told you how to discard your unlucky nature," said Jack.

The diffuse ceiling lights in the room cast very faint shadows, Jack's shadow shifted, it seemed to struggle.

"I managed in the end," said Jonah as he took another step. He noticed his own shadow, it shifted like Jacks.

"Did you? Really?" said Jack.

"I have no regrets in life anymore."

"Well, my brother, I am about to end that life for you," said Jack.

"You're welcome to try," answered Jonah.

Jack moved his hands behind his back, grabbed something tucked into his trousers and then his hands in the air. He held a knife in each, they hovered over the heads of Mary and Jenny.

Jonah called out, "No! Don't!"

Something hit the back of Jonah's head and darkness overcame him.

Wow, that was spectacular!

What happened?

The way you kicked down that door! Right out of an action movie.

Shut up.

Problem is, you're now unconscious.

What?

And Jackie boy over there, is about to put steel through the girls.

I have to wake up!

And do what exactly?

Stop him.

How? He's armed to the teeth.

Gregory said I can save people, so I'm going to save them.

Ooooooh! Gregory said. Since when did he start telling the truth?

Truth or not, I have to try.

So be it. Wake up.

Jonah's head hurt. He blinked and blinked again until his vision became focused. He tried to say something but he was gagged. He tried to move but he was tied, tied to a chair which was bolted to the floor, his hands were tied behind him and behind the chair.

He shook the hair from his eyes to get a better view. This room, now that he looked at it, looked medieval. Grey stone walls, a stone floor, various hand tools and blades hung from the walls.

The chair didn't make sense to Jonah, why was it bolted to the floor in the middle of the room?

Jack was nowhere to be seen, Mary and Jenny were still gagged and tied to the gurneys, Jenny on the left and Mary on the right. But most important was that they were still breathing and still alive. Again Jonah tried to make some noise but the gag was painfully tight.

Who knocked you out?

What do you mean?

Well, Jack was in front of you. You were hit from behind.

You think there's two of them?

What? No! The priest, you idiot.

Gregory? I know he's manipulative, but he's not a murderer.

Who said he's a murderer? I just think he's helping Jack. I could help you, if you want.

How?

A voice came from behind, "I have to give it to you, Jonah," Jack said. "You are more of a man than I."

He moved nonchalantly passed Jonah and ran a long sharp blade across Jonah's right cheek. The cheek split and bled.

Jack spoke again, "I see them you know, the shadows, our shadows. They are not normal, do you know what they are?"

Jack looked at Jonah for an answer, but all that he could do was shake his head and grunt.

"I did not think so. I will have to ask the priest if he knows anything."

Jonah looked at the blade Jack carried: A Japanese katana.

Jack saw his interest in it, "Oh this old thing?" He lifted the blade and studied Jonah's blood. "Just something I picked up on my travels."

Jonah continued to struggle in his seat.

"It did need quite some sharpening." Jack walked until he was in between Jenny and Mary again, where Jonah had first saw him when he opened the door.

Mary's eyes were closed, she seemed unconscious. But Jenny was now awake, and tears flowed from her eyes. She turned her head to the side and she looked at Jonah. He wanted to say it was going to be alright, that he was going to get them out of this.

Jack spoke, "If there is one thing I hate, it is using blunt instruments." He lifted the katana and thrust the blade down into Jenny's chest. The blade protruded through the bottom of the gurney. Jenny's eyes screamed in pain, her bodied jerked, and then she became still. Life left her eyes.

Jonah's eyes bloodshot. Screams of pain, anger, and despair were muffled by the gag. His body trembled as he tried to break his bonds. Blood ran down his face from his cheek wound.

I can help you, Jonah. Just. Let. Go.

Jonah's shadow trembled and shuddered. It shifted into countless shapes.

Jack noticed and became curious. "What is the matter, old man?" said Jack. "You look irritated." Jack gave Mary a quick look. He saw the desperation in Jonah, his misery, Jack would surely profit from this act.

Jonah slowly shook his head, he pleaded to Jack with every muscle in his face not to do what he was about to do. Jack smiled, and slowly, Jack pushed the blade through Mary.

You can still save them. Do not let the sun go down on your anger. Let go.

I'm not angry, and I don't have to let go. I'm in full control, Jack is already dead.

Jonah's senses lit up and his muscles bulged. He squeezed and stretched until the chair splintered and dismantled, the ropes that bound him fell apart. He rose to his feet and removed the gag. The shadow that once shuddered and morphed around him on the floor had completely disappeared. Then Jonah saw that it hadn't gone, it had moved onto his body. The shadow shimmered all over Jonah, on his skin, clothes, and hair.

Jack removed the blade from Mary's chest and held it ready. He looked at Jonah fascinated. "You look taller!" Jack said. "And darker. How did you do that?"

Jonah saw a new world, it moved slower, he saw light he couldn't see before, he smelled smells beyond human senses. He looked around and embraced this new world, then he saw them. There was something new about Jenny and Mary's still bodies, there was something coming out of them. Orange light seeped out of every pore, then the light gathered together at the abdomen of each body and disappeared up through the ceiling, like smoke rising from a candle.

"You know it is the priest you should be angry at," said Jack as he rounded and stood on the far side of Jenny's table.

Jonah looked to the walls where the various tools hung and moved to a nearby long blade. It wasn't the sharpest and it was also rusty, but he just needed good length to take Jack down.

Jonah kept moving, he slowly walked towards Jack.

Jack decided to go on the offencive. "I am sorry, Jonah, but I will have to chop you into little bits now."

Jack swung the blade down towards Jonah's head. But Jonah had time with his new vision to sidestep the attack. Jonah swung his blade, Jack was quick enough to bring his katana back up and block. The blades clashed. Jonah continued to played with Jack, it took no effort. Every swing was slow and drawn out to Jonah, Jack posed no threat to him.

You know you have people to save, right?

Gregory?

Jack swung a massive two-handed side swipe, Jonah took a step back and avoided the sharp katana, then in a blink he stepped towards Jack and landed a sledgehammer of a fist to Jack's ribs, they crumbled into dust. Jack tried to take a gasp of air as he fell to his knees and Jonah dropped his rusty blade seeing that Jack was immobilised. Jonah was already behind him when Jack's vision cleared from the hit, and before he'd realised, a trunk of an arm had been wrapped around his neck. Jack struggled, but his strength had left him and Jonah's power overwhelmed his.

Jack tried to speak, "You're a sore loser, Jo-"

Jonah squeezed and with a jerk, Jack's neck snapped, his body instantly became limp. Jonah let him go and Jack fell into a heap.

An orange glow emitted from Jack's body just like Jenny's and Mary's had.

"That, Jonah," said Gregory, "is life."

Jonah couldn't see the priest anywhere.

"Is this how I save them?" Jonah asked and motioned to the tables.

"Only one can be saved," said the priest, "you've taken one life, it cannot be share by two."

"God damn it!" Jonah screamed.

The priest decided to let the curse go this time. "Hurry, Jonah, you don't have much time."

Jonah placed a hand on Jack's body, the orange light shifted, it moved like the shadow moved, but it had direction. The light gathered at Jonah's hand and spread over his body. The meaning of the stained-glass window became clear, it wasn't fire that surrounded his silhouette, it was this 'life'.

Jonah stood between Mary and Jenny as Jack had done. He glowed as he looked over them, their still bodies extended away from him. Jonah turned to Jenny and placed a palm on her cheek, he bent over and touched her forehead with his. He whispered to her, "Why did you have to be so perfect?" Jonah cried. "You'd never forgive me, if I chose you." Jonah kissed Jenny's forehead and reached out behind him, he placed a hand palm down on Mary's closed eyes. Jonah glowed brighter and through his hand, life entered Mary. Her wound healed, then her heart started beating. Then Mary took a breath.

"I'm sorry, Jonah," said Gregory.

"No you're not, priest."

Jonah unstrapped Mary from the table and lifted her into his big arms.

"There was no other choice," Gregory said.

Jonah didn't respond. With a look that could cut through steel he left the room and Jenny behind.

XXIII - Indalo Man

"Mary! Are you ready?" yelled Jonah.

No answer came.

"Mary?"

Jonah stomped from the living room to the bedroom in his flat to find her.

"What is she doing?" he said to himself.

He opened the bedroom door and saw Mary facing the other way.

"I look stupid!" Mary said.

"Don't worry," said Jonah, "you'll all look the same, you'll all look stupid."

Mary span around and ran to Jonah giggling. Her school uniform was a little on the big side.

"How long do we have to live here?" asked Mary.

"Not long." Jonah hugged her. "It takes time to find a new place to live."

"How long?"

"Too long." Jonah pushed Mary back, "are you ready? Do you have everything?"

Mary nodded her head so hard Jonah thought it might fall off.

Jonah wanted to be rid of this place, he hated it here. The green square, the stone steps, the stained-glass window, the big old church, and the door to the passageway. He hated the sight of it all. The stained-glass window had rearranged itself back to its original form of random shapes and colours. Gregory hadn't been seen or heard from since that day, which pleased Jonah, but he did need to settle some things with him.

"About time you showed," Jonah said.

"I was busy." Gregory sat next to Jonah on the wooden bench.

"Do I need to worry about the police showing up on my doorstep?" asked Jonah.

"No," Gregory confirmed. "You're in the clear. And everything that Jenny owned now belongs to Mary and her guardian, which is officially now you."

"Good," said Jonah. "She doesn't remember anything. Mary."

"Probably a good thing."

"Tell me something," said Jonah. "Could I have saved them both? I saw life leaving them before I killed Jack."

Gregory looked at Jonah. "No. Jack killed them. You can only take the life from those you have killed."

"You can only take the life from those you have killed," Jonah repeated. "You know how dumb that sounds, right?"

"Since when did gods make any sense?" said Gregory.

"Ha! And since when did they ever tell the truth." Jonah rose to his feet. "Then that's it."

"That's what?" ask the priest.

"You think I'm gonna hang around after everything you've done, old man?"

"You think you have a choice? That's funny."

"Goodbye Gregory." Jonah started to walk away.

"You don't know what you are, Jonah!" said the priest. "We have work to do."

Jonah turned and closed the gap between them in an instant. He was nose to nose with the priest. "Because of you, too many people died. You made my life a misery, and god knows who else's. I want nothing to do with you!" Jonah had the impression that Gregory no longer had an advantage over him. He somehow felt his strength was now greater than the priest's. "I think you're scared of who I am," Jonah said.

"Don't let it consume you, Jonah. You can't escape if it does."

"Nothing will consume me, priest, because I'm never going to use it again." Jonah started to walk away again.

"Okay!" Gregory called to Jonah. "I'll let you have a break for a short while. You can run if you want, but you'll see me again."

Jonah jumped into his car and left Enville.

Gregory watched as Jonah drove out of the village. He sat down on the wooden bench, stretched out both arms on the backrest and tilted his head back. "You can come out, I know you're there!" yelled Gregory.

Jesus emerged from behind a tree, he was still wearing the same all black suit as before.

Gregory looked at him and raised an eyebrow. "Don't you get sick of wearing black?"

"I like black," said Jesus. "But there's something more important to discuss other than the colour of my clothes."

"Let me guess," said Gregory. "The President's top ten tips for giving your immigrant wife an orgasm."

"This is serious! I felt it and I'm damn sure that the others did too." Jesus folded his arms in an attempt to amplify his tone. "You've woken a demon."

"It's under control-"

"Oh really!"

"Yes really," Gregory showed Jesus absolute confidence. "This human is in control of it. I saw it myself."

"Well, it's not just me that you have to convince," said Jesus as he nodded to movement around him.

One by one people arrived onto the green outside the church. They all approached and gathered around Gregory. The green filled with people from different cultures and race, and once everyone was accounted for they walked up the stone steps and entered the church without opening the door.

Mary and Jonah cuddled on the sofa as they watched TV in the magnolia living room. Mary's eyes grew heavy, she started to breath a little deeper and entered dreamland.

Jonah felt a light itch on the back of his neck and scratched it. A black mark appeared where he scratched and it spread. The black mark drew a male stick figure a few inches high and when it was complete, one last line was drawn: a line connected one hand to the other that arched over the figure's head. The stick figure that resembled a man with outstretched arms holding a rainbow glowed orange for a few moments before turning back to black. It remained there, like a tattoo.

Jonah managed to reach for the TV remote on the coffee table without disturbing Mary and flicked through the channels until he found the one he was looking for. The lottery results were being called out so Jonah carefully dug into his pocket for his ticket. He watched and listened as the numbers were being drawn, his eyes darted from the TV to the ticket and back again as all the numbers were displayed. Jonah checked the numbers again.

"Son of a bitch!"
