Mark: Hello everybody, my name is Markiplier, and welcome to Golf With Friends*FART*, with Ethan and wade
You asshole! *Ethan-Wade laugh* Farting in my intro, ha ha ha, ah fuck it.
*Mark and Ethan laugh* Wade: Bob's not here, so someone had to do it.
Ethan: Clap
Wade: So... *is cut off*  
Mark: What? Oh, clap in three two one! *clap*
*non-synchronized claps*anish was here
E: Wait, do that again?   W: That was terrible! 
M: Nope, can't. Nooope.  E: That was so bad, do it again!
E: (through giggles) Okay   M: *laughs*
W: That's it, that's all you get.
M: Haaaa  E: Should I do an intro?
M: I don't know, do you feel like doing an intro?
W: You just went, why did you shoot if you were going to do an intro??
E: I don't know, because we're already in it.
M: I don't know.
M: Shit.  W: Oh why is my ball white? That's boring.
E: Fuck it, no intro.
W: Also, um, Ethan, just so you know, there's a POWERBAR.
M:  Yeah, I, there's a power bar.
E: No, I know that.
E: I realize.  M: You knew that!?
E: I got it in, I got it in in TWO, Wade!
W: That's good, that's very good.  M: Yeah, I mean - It's-
E: I know how to play this game, what do you think I'm a fucking amateur?
M: You guys are making FUN OF ME!
W: Well, I can't ever assume anymore.
M: This is BULLSHIT!
M: I didn't even get to-  E: How does it feel?! 
M: -I didn't even get to post that video! It's fucking stupid!
M: You guys are assholes!  W: It's okay, I posted it for the both of us.  M:  Oh, thanks, yeah. E: *chuckles*
E: Ready? Uh-Whoo!
M: Whee! Hole in one.  W: Ohwoo.
E: Hooole in one.  W: I'm finished with this.  M: HOW DOES IT FEEL WADE?!? TO SUCK?!?  E: Yeah Wade, how does it feel?
M: DONGER.
W: Well, it's been awhile.  M: Yeah it's been awhile.
E: Ha, it's been awhile.
M: I've moved on from this Let's Play.
W: To be fair I never get to play classic anymore,
W: I've always got stupid cubes and cylinders to work with.
M: Yeah, it's supposed to be a relaxing, fun experience. WITH friends.
E: Mhm.  M: Like that's the whole idea, right?
W: Woohoo!  M: Yay, Par!
Wade: Oh.  Mark: I did it, guys.
M: Oh, Ethan.
E: I'm suckin' dick on this one.
M: Yeah, you are, I see that, very much so.  E: Yeah.
W: It's okay.
E: Oooo!
E: Ahahahahahahaha.
M: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Mark and Wade: ooo!
M: Ahhh  W: How does it feel
Ethan and Mark...ohhh
* Giggles * M: Feels
Feels pretty good man I mean I don't know why you need to be so
antagonistic about everything.. I mean    E: I'd like it
if i got more support from you Wade because  it feels like
you're really trying to drag me down
M: I mean he gets that enough from me
W: ohh..uh excellent shot
there *Marks giggles*   E: Thank you.
E: Oh no, there's a..(giggles) There's a gap there.
M: Yep, it is a..
W: Mind the gap
M: Oh!!
W: (yelling)
Oo-ho-ho! Shit!
Hole in one baby! Hole in fucking one!  E: Gonna go.. And go again!
Ethan: Ahhh
M: Eat  a chode. hahahaha hahaha E: God damn it!
M: *deep laughter*
W: I- Ethan, I fully respect, you will be able to do it this time  E: You gotta use just enough power
E: Up! I'm on the platform so thats good. W: You almost screwed it up. HU HU HUH
E: HO! there. we. go.
M: Man, Wade just go back to insulting 'cause this is just weird W: *whispers* no
M: Be a NORMAL Wade~ GEEZ E: yeah.
E: Yeah, "normal" Wade
E: Why you tryna change yourself for us?    W: Uh, Does not compute
M: *in sarcastic tone* You've changed, Wade. *laughs*
E: Change
M: You've changed *laugh* W: Well money and power
W: will do that to you
M: Hahahahah. W: and I dont have either.
W: You gotta be kidding me. M: That's not good, that's not good. Hehehehe.
M: Seems like the only one who is doing well is ME. 
E: Excuse me
W: I know, I'm almost back to last place. M: Amazing!
E:  Oh wait no, I'm in- I'm in last. I was like "I'm doing well." No.. I am in last.
M: Oh shit, fuck. Oh no. God damn it. W: Guys, I got there in 2 strokes.
E: I got there in a few! M: Yeah, shut your f- NO!
*Wade and Ethan laugh*
E: Ahhhh! How's it feel to suck, Mar--
M: Hey! I'm- oh, I'm- god damn it, I lost the lead and I'm...
W: *talking over him* It looks like the only one who's doing well is me.
M: SHUUUT UUUP! YOU'RE MAKING FUN OF ME!
E: Oh! Oh, a hole in one for me! Thank you very much!
W: *high pitched* OOOO BABY!
M: Wait--WHAT?! I'm stuck on the fucking lip?
*Wade and Ethan laugh*
M: I'm stuck on the fucking lip!
M: What the fuck is that shit?!
*Sigh*
M: You dickbags got a hole in one?
M: FUCK YOOOOU!
E: I got a hole in one
M: FUCK YOOU
E: Okay Im gonna use some math here
To help me out
W: Three plus four equals
W: SHOOT THE BALL
E: Im back where I started. Whoopsies
W: Whoopsie Doopsie
Mark: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, NOOO
W: That was so close
M: NOOOOOOO
E: Here I go!
E: Uhhhup M: You know - *Wade laughs*
M: When ever I feel bad about my shots
I always just look at what Ethan's doing
And I remember how - E: Yup
M: much better I am E: I'm great at golf
W: I got a hole in one, I was trying to give him a tip and
he's like *Mocking Ethan* Oh I know how to play! *Mark laughs*
*Ethan and Wade at the same time* E: I know - I know what I'm doing! 
W: I'm already a professional!
*Ethan laughs* M: Just stop doing it so hard! *M giggles*
M: Just softly... 
E: Well if I do it too little -
E: There we go 
W: There you go 
M: Just caress it
E: Hey, guys! 
W: No pressure, but you've only got three shots
M: Hey, guys!
M: Crazy boys, here!
E: Crazy boys!
M:  What is up my Crazy Boys!
E:  What is up my Crazy Boys!
W: I'm LordCrazy777
M: Hey- Doishkee! Oh, shit.
E: Boo!
M: Fuck.
E: Hup! Ooooh! W: Isn't that full power? E: No! Goddamn it.
M: No not full power. 
E: I keep hitting the wrong-
M: Haiiii tadoshki!
M: *gasps* Yeeessss!
M: NOOOOOOOO!
E: Haha! 
W: It is full power!
M: Is it full power?
E: ah ha ha!
W: It's full power on the third, uhh- 
M: Ohhh!
M: On the third one, oH!
E: Huuuh- 
M: fuuuuuck-
M: WOOOOOAAAH! HEY!
M: Oh, fucking- goddamn it.
E: Woohoo! *words* 
M: I am in the EXACT same spot as you were
W: I know! I told you
M: *giggles*
W: You gotta hit full power on the third target, what did you expect? *laughs*
M: I don't know, fuck
E: heheheheh
E: Haha! Double bogey!
M: heAAAAA
M: huAA
M: huAAAAAH
M: woOOAH!
M: oh oH OH OH OH OH OH
W: oh oH Oh, man, nice
W: Very nice.
M:*loudly* OH
M: *even louder* OH
W: I thought that the last second
W: it was going to knock you out of the way.
E: Did you get a hole in one?
M: I GOT A HOLE IN O-O-ONE
W: Oh, did you? Very nice!
M: Yes, I-  hahaHaHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
M: How did that work physically?
That's physically impossible
E: There we go M: Ya did it W: You had to like... I don't know. I don't know how he did it
M: hole in ONE!
M: If i can just hold on to this lead W: OH, this hole is rough
M: IS IT THOUGH? E: Oh yeah
M: Oh yeah it is W: It was the last time i did it
W: They chan- E: Nope okay whoops he he he
M: HOY *yelling! WHAT??!?!? NO GOD THE BLADE E: There we go
M: The blaaaade E: OH NOOOOOO
M: The BLAAAAADE
W: The blade hit me too I bounced back so hard it took me here anyway E: NO DAMMIT Wait where are the logs going?
E: Okay I'vE GAHHH Okay the logs are taking me with them
E: Okie doke W: *says no repeatedly very rapidly*
E: alright i've got a clear shot. Mark: NO AHH WADE LOGS NO
E: YES HAHA ooooo ooo that was close
M: HAHAHOHO NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
E: I got some good shit on that hole
M: *makes hopeful noise* Oh FUCK W: EASY E: oh wow
E: Mark you're terrible at this game
W: AHHHH ONE POINT AT THE END M: AHHH NO
M: NOOOO
W: And then there's... Ethan right there
E: I'm closer M: I-It's cause you got the advantage from the saw we both got hit by it why did you get out of it alive? W: *laughs*
W: Because I was a second late
M: FUCK YOU E:  I did pretty good on that one
M: Yeah Ethan- W: That saw blade was AWESOME
M: -It was expected that you were gonna be terrible, but I can't believe myself E: WHY WAS IT EXPECTED
E: THAT I was gonna be terrible? M: IT WAS EXPECTED
M: I don't know... E: WHY M: I just always expect that out of ya
E: *laughs* W: What do you guys wanna see next? E: expect that I'm gonna be at
M: I don't know E: horrible at everything that I do
M: Wait what's haunted? Yeah I haven't seen haunted E: Yeah do haunted
M: EEWWWWW that goat sneezed and or jizzed
M: *laughs* W: Both simultaneously we call it the "snizz" E: That goat is covered in semen
M: *laughs more* E: GHOST SEMEN
M: *laughs even more, but also louder*
M: My game is crashing apparently
M: Oh there we go we're good
E: OH
M: OH FUCK E: It's all glowy W: Welcome to the haunted mansion
M: Oh my gohahahod E: oh I'm an egg
E: OOHHH BOY OH BOY
M: Is low gravity ON?
W: A little bit, but not high enough to account for that E: Yeep
M: Haaiiya o jumpin'
M: Oh oh oh  fuck
E: Are we all the same shape or are we different? W: No
W: It's random each M: Okay E: Oh good M: Don't fuck up
E: OH NO
Mark: Ah no! I'm right there! Fuck me! E: How am I
E: being launched in the air so much?
M: I'm right... look, I'm right there guys
M: I'm right... awwww... fuck.
E: Aw! Jesus...
M: Oh no... W: NO M: come on, just get in the god damn hole... Come on...! Yes! E: It looks like we're all eggs.
M: Fuck yea! How did I get a bogey? I did that in like, 2 shots! E: Ehhh, ehhh, ehhh-ahh
W: Double bogey M: How'd I get a bogey? E: Okay, okay, yes, yes, yes, ready W: I don't know. E: There-there we go.
M: Nice. W: You apparently shot three times. E: Seven. *laughs* M: I don't know. That was a bunch of crap. E: How'd you only shoot three times?!
M: Oh no. W: Oh God. M: Oh no. W: Who's the cube? Okay, it's Ethan. E: I'm the cube.
M: Wait, oh I'm- W: Mark's a baby cube! M: I'm a tiny cube! E: You're a Tiny Box Tim M: I'm the baby, gotta love me-woaa woaah woah woah
M: Bouncy bouncy bouncy boUNCY NO NO OH W: No no NO NUUU M: *mocking Wade* NUUU E: *mocking Wade* NUUU
W: *high pitched* STOP BOUNCING I'M JUST TRYING TO SHOOT M: AAAHH fuck
E: With the cube you can slide a little bit. It's kinda nice. W: Ah-ha! No, NOO E: Fucking god damn it.
E: There. M: NOOOO W: Oh I hate cylinders M & E: *laughing*
W: Ugh M: Hiiiya. Nuuhahahaoo E: You can not make it up that hill.
E: I believe in- M: Hah ah ah uh ah E: There you go! You were close, you were close, you were real close. W: No No NO NO NO NO NO NOOO M: Wade, what's goin' on?
E: WHERE? WHAT? M: Shh. E: DID YOU JUST GO through the wall?
M: NO W: Oh come on! M: *high pitched excitement* YES YES E: There you go! M: Oh fuck. Ha Wade. W: Don't do it! DON'T DO IT
M & E: *laughing at Wade* M: Wade *still laughing* Eat a dick
W: NOOAHHAO
M: Oh man! W: OH-OH NO M: Oh no. W: GET BACK IN THERE E: Where are you going!? M: *laughing*
E: Why are you jumping so much?! W: I'M GOING TO THE HOLE M: He's desperate. It's is last stroke.
M & E: *laughing* W: NO! Well E: You didn't make it. W: I noticed, thank you  M: Oh you suck E: Hey, I'm not losing right now. It's good.
M: Well, I mean, you're losing to me. E: What? W: What is that!? M: What IS that? E: I'm a-I'm a- I think I'm a Christmas tree ornament.
M: Oh, you are. Oh no, you've got a nub on you. W: Get off of him. E: Oh no, that's not me. W: Am I the ornament? M: Oh no, I'M the Christmas tree ornament.
M: Weeeeee. Weeee we we ahaha hi guys. E: I'm a-I'm a uh W: *With disappointment* I'm a cube?! WELL. M: Ok
E: Eh W: OH AHAAHAH OH M: Ooh AAHH E: There we go! Woo!
M: WHAT THE FUCKING FU-DID YOU HIT ME?! E: Ha haha W: Yeah..
E: You can't hit each other can you? W: Oh you can! M: You fucking hit me, you bitch! Did you fucking HIT ME?
M: FUCK YOU! Where is the uh E: Oh what the- M: Where-where is the...?
E: Yeah, you gotta go far on this one. M: Oh no. E: Oh no, I went to the side. M: What do I-what the fuck? E: You- fuck. God
M: How do I... W: Why can't we touch the ground? 
E: Don't hop over don't hop over don't hop over don't hop over M: AAHHH THE WRONG WAY
E: There we go M: NOOOO
M: Fuck W: STOOOP E: There we go!
E: I'm doin' pretty good. M: Okay, alright, okay *high pitched* NOOOO
M: *singing* Thhaaat is NOT RIGHT W: Bounce
W: BOUNCE SOMEWHERE
M: *Still singing* OOooh it's a BAD NIGHT. oh fuck
W: YOU'RE AN ODDLY SHAPED  THING BOUNCE E: There we go-OH GOD DAMN IT I fucking keep bouncing over walls. There we go
M: HO yes-NOOO W: WOOOAH E: OOh, ooh I'm close, oh I'm close M: *softly* fuck off. W: Where is the end of this level?
E: OH NO GOD DAMN IT WHY DID I DO THAT? I fucking boun-ah. I bounced out
M: I'm not gonna make it, guys. E: How did you do that Wade? Are you an acorn? M: Guys.
W: I don't know what I am-NOO NOO  M: Wait, how do you only have four strokes?! How in the FUCK- E: Yeah, what the hell? *giggles*
M: How in the tits do you only have four strokes?! E: I ran out of strokes.
E: You still o-oh wait, no, nevermind. W: TEN SECONDS 
E: Oh, can you get it? M: Better get in there.
E: Better get in the hole. M: Better get in there. W: STOP BOUNCING E: Oh boy. Oh boy. 2, 1
M: OOhohohohooh ho ho ho, OH eat a dick! E: AHAHAHA yeah, that's why
E: Oh I'm a star?
E: I'm a STAR. M: Woah woah woah woah woah woah easy up
M: Easy up, easy up. W: STOP BOUNCING
*lightning sounds*
M: Woah, man, the lightning is intense guys. *more lightning*
E: Okay M: Woah boy that's not good. This is the opposite of good.
E: There we go! I did good, I got a birdie. I did real good. M: Shut the fuck up ya asshole! E & W: *soft laughter*
M: If I wanted to know what the fuck you did, I woulda asked. W: WELL
M: AH E: What the fuck are ya doing? M: NOOO fuck oooff
W: PLEASE? M: NOOO E: Hahaha
E: I like this game. W: WHY AM I GOING STRAIGHT UP? I'M A CUBE M: NO
E: This is a fun one!
M: Shut up, you'll get yours! W: YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. E: Ooh
E: Ooh
W: *screams*
M: FUCK
E: Hah M: Uggghhh
W: OKAY WELL HERE I AM HUMPIN' A CHAIR M: Were-were you-were you-were you just a ball? Were you a ball? E: No, I was a star. M: Oh
M: Ah, fuck you anyway. E: Ah shit, you gotta...
*lightning sounds*
M: Ah shit guys. W: I better not be the cylinder again. M: Where do we go? W: Oh that's a THAT'S A BAD E: Oh shit, okay.
M: Where do we go? That way? W: *Slaps self in face* 
E: Euh M: Fuck
E: Oh no, nonono M: Woah, okay, alright, that's not good. E: Do you gotta be...
*lightning sounds*
M: Ah fuck
E: How did you stay on there? Ooh
W: AAH E: Ooh, close.
W: NOOO
E: There we go, there we go. I'm doing a lot better this game. I might win this one.
M: NOOOO E: Look out!
M: St-Stop!
W: NOOO M: Eh, eh, eh, NO NOO W: Mark! Bump me! BUMP ME M: AH AAH FUCK NOOO E: You just get- you're just jumping
M: NOOOOOO
M: *screaming* NOOOO  E: Wade, you're so-you're so close, Wade!
W: I KNOW! I KNOW! E: It's right there
E: And on your last stroke! W: YES I'M AWARE
M: Fuck man. E: And both of you ran out of time. OH, look who's in the lead. M: Oh, fuck this shit. W: *sarcastically* Oh good, we're cones.
M: I'm a mini cone at least. E: Ooh, ooh, don't
M:  No, I'm a Christmas ball. W: WHAT? I hit the-Are you kidding me?  E: Oh no, oh no, oh no. M: What the fuck?!
E: There we go. NO. God damn it, FUCK. W: It wouldn't let me bounce over!?
M: Yeah, it wouldn't. Live with it Wade! E: FUCKING- M: Why don't you just- E: GOD DAMN IT M: Oh, oh, now you're feeling the pain, HUH ETHAN HUH? E: I'M FEELING THE PAIN M: YEAH!
E: I KEEP- M: EEEEAAAT IT E: I CAN'T MAKE IT UP THE RAMP OR I FUCKING GO OVER IT W: OH SUCK IT PAIN FEELER M: YEAH FEEL THAT PAIN FEEL MY PAIN
M: FEEL IT, RUB MY PAIN E: Uhh, ooh. rub it? M: Rub it! Rub my pain! E: I don't want to rub your pain. M: Rub my pain!
E: Do I have to? M: Rub it! I gotta big ball. Rub my pain. 
E: Uh, oooh. W: You've got a normal ball though M: I am a big-ah fucking hell. E: Fucking
*more lightning*
W: DO NOT YOU-I'M STUCK IN A BOX M: NOOO WHAT THE FUCK? WHY DID I BOUNCE? I'M A FUCKING BALL
E: No! WHY? FUCKING UH, W: I did the same stupid thing. E: I KEEP GOING OVER Every fucking time!
M: Ohhh. E: I'm bouncing, it's really hot in here. *softly* No, stop. M: No!
M: *groaning* W: Well, here we go! Can Wade make the perfect shot? E: WHY? Don't hit me. M: Didn't mean to
W: Nope, the answers NO. I'M A SUCK A DOODLE DO COCKTAPUS!--cocktapus?
Mark and Ethan: *cracking up*
W: I called myself a cocktapus
M: Oh I ran out of strokes. I was the ball and I ran out of strokes. I was a normal golf ball.
E: Okay, I have-I have one more. I have one shot.
W: And there it goes.
E: Oh fucking god damn it M: You're a real cocktapus ain't ya?! Huh Ethan? Stop being such a cocktapus
M: Here I go. *badly singing* Here I go again, on my own. E: I'm just slowly falling down the stairs. M: What the fuck is this?
M: What the fuck is this? Wha-oh my GOoOoD
W: NO E: Where did you go?!
M: I WENT BACK
E: Why did you go backwards? M: I HIT THE FUCKING ROOF FUCK YOU
E: What shape are you? M: THAT'S FUCKING WHY
E: *laughing* M: FUCK OFF
W: Ah E: AAHHHH
W: Golf With Your Friends, map 1 versus map 2. E: I can't make it over
M: Oh my god
M: I... get up, *sighs* W: Oh I'M AN EGG BOUNCE LIKE ONE
M: Oh, fuck. If I could stop being a god damn cube. Do you know how many times I've been a cube?
M: FUCK
M: Just... CAN I GIVE UP?
M: fuck. You CANNOT GET THE CUBE UP THE RAMP. MY CUBE STOPPED ON THE RAMP. YOU CAN NOT SHOOT A CUBE OFF A GOD DAMN RAMP W: please. No! NO NOOO
W: AAHHH M: Just die, just die.
E: Stop bouncing. Stop bouncing! I'm just bouncing M: Stop bouncing, please. E: STOP M&E: *laughing*
M: St-stop! W: No, no, Wadey loved you, Wadey loved you egg. GET IN THE HOLE E: IT'S SO HOT IN HERE *takes off sweatshirt* IT'S A-IT'S A MILLION DEGREES
M: OPEN A WINDOW YOU IDIOT. I know you have windows, open them.
E: No, there's no time.
M: N-no. *dramatically* I can't do that, Mark. You don't understand.
M: Fucking what?! E: God damn it, I didn't. E: Ooh I might've hit the bouncers.
M: In what world-in... E: Ok, I'm in a bad situation. Oh no, oh, uh oh no I didn't do it.
M: IN WHAT WORLD IS THAT HOW THAT WORKS IN PHYSICS?
W: Uhh
W: This one? M: THE EGG CANNOT GO, GUYS, THE EGG WILL NOT GO OFF THE RAMP, I'M DOING FULL POWER
W: NO M: *slowly sinking* GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS E: I'm going back to the same spot.
E: Go! NO, don't go over it!
M: NOO GUYS IT'S FUCKED ME IT WON'T GOoO
E: WHY AM I-I ran out of strokes M: GUYS W: YESS I GOT IN THE HOLE
M: GUYS IT WON'T GO E: AHH M: WADE SPECTATE ME LOOK W: I'm watching! E: I'm done. W: Full Power M: THAT WAS FULL POWER
M: GUYS
E: What kind of dark magic... M: IT WON'T GO
W: Oh no, that's so sad
M: I HATE THIS GAME I HATE IT I HATE THIS GAME
E: I think I'm a normal ball. Do we have to-there's the goat that we've been searching for.
E: Oh, yep I'm a normal ball. Okay, where is it? M: It's the-it's the spizz goat.
W: Woah, STOP NOO. E: Oooh W: STOP BOUNCING
E: Promising, promising, very promising. M: OH, I'm in-that was the wrong, that was not the right course.
E: Okay. Stop M: Okay, alright. E: Stop stop stop!
M: No, NO NO NO W: Ethan, don't you screw me
M: Aye yai yai E: *humorless* Hahahahahaha W: I mean, thank you for the boost I guess? E: You're welcome
E: Ah, Mark- W: GET IN THE HOLE, YOU PATHETIC LITTLE LIFE FORM E: *laughing* Mark's still at the fucking beginning. M: SHUT UP
M: DO NOT SPECTATE ME RIGHT NOW This is fucking bullshit.
M: *sternly* Do not spectate me W: Good job Mark
M: Do not! W: Alright. M: Hole in one W: One shot. M: Hole in one, fuck yeah
E: Yeah, hole in one. M: *high pitched* oOH NO IT WAS RIGHT THERE OH E: Just keep bouncing
M: OH AH AH AHH NO FUCK oh
E: Oh there you go W: Hey, at least our scores are close
E: Yeah M: Yeah, that's what matters.
W: Oh I'm a cone?! M: Oh it's a spizz gorilla.
M: We gotta get through it's legs? Is that we gotta do?
E: God damn it I'm a fucking ornament again M: Fuck, well there's its head.
E: S-sTOp bOuncing-
E: The ordaMent just continuously bounces!
E: Every time I try and make a shot.
W: *chimp noices* E: Keee nO don't- go over it.
E: Don't go over it... W: *More chimp sounds* M: Eh~
E: *sighs* M: Fucking-why-Really??
M: Really???
E: Oh no W: *muttering please*
M: Really- NOOOOO!
M: OH YOU'VE GOT TO BE DICKING ME-
M: IN THE DIIICK
E: I can't- geT oveR
M: *Snaps* OOOHH YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!
E: Full power! Yes yes! M: Oh nooooo
W: *Coughing*
M: You got to be dicking my dick! E: WHY-
E: I can't get through the fucking gorilla!
M: ooHH FUCK Off!
M: *Manly screams*
M: *More screaming*
W: Ah.
M: *Still screaming*
E: FuckinG-
E: WHY?!
E: There's a baby's head here!
M: It's a dolls' head- It's okay.
W: Oh man.
M: Oh my god W: Well done everybody
M: I hate this.
E: Did you make it Wade?
W: Mak- YEah I did.
E: 'Did-did you make what?' Is that what you were about to say?
E: You were like 'Did I make what?'
M: *Happy mark giggling*
W: I thought you were asking if I made the game or the level or something- E: You know full-
M: 'You know full well!'
E: *laughing* You thought, I was asking you if you made the game?!
W: You- Shut up!
W: I was too busy celebrating my awesome existence!
E: GoD DAMN IT! M: Fuck
E: I keep hitting the shelves! W: I can't get through the hole!
E: uuGGH
E: I'm the fucking hockey puck this should be easy!
M: I- nO, the hockey puck-
M: I was the hockey puck in the last one! It was perfectly spaced,
M: To hit the LEAF!
M: The LEAF-*Ignores Wade's and Ethan's screaming*
M: The LEAF of- on the opposite of the gorilla.
E: Guys-
E: Pleeease- M: I'm on the book shelf.
E: I-I KEEP-
E: I keep hitting hitting the shelf!!
E: Everytime!
W: Yaaay- nO no no No-
W: NOOOO!
M: Okay, guys I made it to the other side.
E: Yes, finally! Me too, me too, me too.
M: I'm bouncing like a son-of-a bitch but I made it!
E: It's fine it's fine- I'M OUT OF GOD DAMN STROKES
E: I finally make it, and I'm out of strokes!
M: OKay.
M: OkaY
M: OKAy
M: NOPE- That was my last stroke nevermind.
E: Your fine M: I'm out.
M: Nope, I'm out- I'm out guys.
W: Oh my goodness M: Guys I'm out.
M: I'm out guys.
E: Oh good, the cone my favorite- my favorite shape!
W: The finest of Earths' creatures.
E: Can't wait-oh god I'm in the perfect spot too. W: OH come on!
E: Oh go- IT's LeavinG me?!
M: No thank you- OkaY
M: Okay guys-
E:-fUCKed, I'm fucked!
E: I'm fucked! I'm at the tip- M: I've got some potental here
M: Yes! I got a birdie! I got a birdie! E: I'm at the edge of the rim-
M: I got a birdie! (3x) E: How??
M: I got a birdie- guys,
M: I did it I  got a birdie! W: *Raging*
E: I'm on the edge of the ra-  ooH K- I 'm going up there now.
E: Okay- alright, please don't put me back.
E: I can stay up here right? Yep, thank you.
E: No, don't go- ffffFFF
M: aaAHahahahahAHAHAHAHAHA
*Mark you okay there?
W: I- CAN'T- GO- ANYWHERE!
*Mark continues to laugh*
E: eUGAH
M: Alright, I'mma watch Wade- Wade why are you- W: More momentum!!
M: Wade, how the fuck did you get so high?!
W: The cauldron!
M: OOOHHH
W: I don't want to go straight up-
W: I wANT TO GO FOWARD!
E: Oh nooo
W: WELL that doesn't flippy-dippy-dippy-do matter, I'm here!
M: I got a birdie guys! Look, I got it in two strokes!
E: How?! Whats shape were you?
M: I was a disc.
E: I'm the the fucking not ball.
M: That baby isn't too happy. E: I'm the thing that looks like a ball,
E: But I'm not the ball. M: Fuuuck
E: I love it.
M: Yeah, the paper mache?
E: Yeah, it's fucking bullshit.
M: It's fuking bullshit guys.
M: Guys its fuckin- W: Are you kidding-
W: You better be joking!
M: Heh, YOu better- you better be joking me!
M:  I-I don't appreciate your jokes and candor.
W: OH my- I want to put the babies in a blender!
M: I mean, if you put the babies in the blender its not going to do you any good for-
W: Don't- wWWHYY?!
E: I can bounce my way there. I can make it,
E: I've got-
E: *starts breathing faster*
M: I've-I've got time, guys! I've got- I've got time.
E: I've got time!
E: GOd damnit I'm giving up, I'm giving up.
E: Theres no point!
M: There's NO point.
M: aAAUgh
M: AAuggh I'm so close, I've got one stroke left!
M: AAw nO, I'm pointed in the wrong direction,
M: Aren't I??
M:Ah- AUGGH OH I made it in!
M: Oh I did it! I did it, oooh.
W: Yaaaay
E: I'm lost at sea!
E: I'm a lost traveler!
E: I can never make it back!
W: You got fifteen seconds.
M: Grab on to the babies head in a jar!
M: Grab on! W: He's just kidding-
E: nnOOOOOOOO
E: Go- Back-
E: Yes, you can make it- hUGghh
M: You can do it! I believe in you!
E: Please, please!
M: Stop tryin-Stop trying to ramp it off there.
M: You could- you could make it if you didnt ramp.
W: My goodness. E: Yeah, I could make it if I didn't ramp. I know FULL WELL what I could've done.
*Mark giggles.* Wade: I think Mark's birdie is gonna be the difference in the game.
M:I think so, yeah. Woaahoaho.
Ethan: Where are the magi--tHIS IS A RAMP!
Why'd I hit the edge and bounce BACK?? Wade: Yes! That's very observant of you.
No, but I BOUNCED off of the edge, when I tried to-- Mark: Oh no. [x5]--Why am I BOUNCING?? WHY?!
*'Oh no' continues.* Are you having the same issue?
Mark: Well, I am an EGG.
Ethan: Why am I bouncing back?!
I don't know, man.
E: THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. *goes on to miss another.* STOOOOP.
Please, I'll give you my first-born child. Mark: Oh fuck.
If you let me finish this fucking course.
M: Woah, what the FUCK did I do?
Oh fuck--Y'know, I've realized something, guys.
Life isn't about being angry. Life is about ENJOYING experiences as they come.
And when it--OHHHH, I'M AT THE BEGINNING?! [Wade barks ferociously.] NOOOOOOO!
W: Enjoy it as it comes. E: Mark, life isn't about being angry--!
I-I fUCKING L--I FUCKING LANDED BACK IN THE BEGINNING!
I WAS FUCKING GOING ANYWHERE. I was ACCEPTING my FATE.
[Ethan releases a breathy laugh.]
And it fucking PUT ME BACK.
Wade: At least our scores are still close.
M: Yeah, two more, guys, two more. We got this.
E: Two more M: This is funny right? This is funny. People like this? This is funny, right?
W: AH E: I HIT THE ONE FUCKING JAR IN FRONT OF ME
E: I wa... ugh M: Just stop bouncing stop bouncing stop bouncing euah
M: EuAuh E: I had so much potential. I had so much potential.
M: Where the fuck are we going?
E: You gotta ride the web M: Whaat W: WHY DO I HAVE TO BE A CONE EVERY HOLE?
M: I'm not in the right place. WHERE DOES THE WEB GO?
E: I don't know. M: I don't see where the-where's the web go?
E: Oh I got it. Oh I got it, okay W: I'm down here
M: Where are you?!
E: Ride the one that looks like a ramp M: I see it but where does it go?
E: It goes down. You gotta hit- W: *screaming* M: OH , uh uh uh uhh
M: Okay. E: I've got one shot.
E: One
opportunity
E: Oh no. M: You did-you didn't make it You didn't make it *Fake accent getting stronger with each word*
You did not make
E: I didn't make it and I was a ball 
M: YEEAAAH
I made it guys, I made it, guys, I made it! Guys, I'm doing great!
Guys!
Guys?
Guys, I did it!
I think I'm gonna win!
Guys! I think-I think I'm gonna win! Games are fun to play with your friends!
Guys!
M: Aw fuck W: Oh good, I get to finish with a cylinder! Woohoohoo!
M: I'm uh, I'm not any better off.
E: Which way do we go? There's two ways
M: It's a choose your own aDVENTURE.
M: I can't make it up either of these.
E: I have goosebumps M: NOO! Oh good.
M: Ugh I love goosebumps
E: I love goosebumps, sorry, oh no.
E: Where am I? M: Oh fuck me, fuck me. Okay
M: Oh, the babies are back
Ooh
Fucking
E: Oh, here we go, here we go, stop bouncing. Stop, stop stop. M: No, don't jump, don't jump. okay.
M: Alright, I just gotta make it through this, right? AAH
M: Oh uh, fuck me
E: Babies.. No I'm out of strokes!
M: *Singing* I'm gonna make it, guuuys! Oh fuck me in the fucking butthole.
E: You went up a little high there.
E: A little too much.
M: Oh NOOOO
W: NOO CRAP
E: That was a little too much pizzaz for that hole.
M: Okay, it's all up to you Wade. Wadey poo. Wadeybaby. 
E: You've got it. Fulfill the prophecy
W: I'm here.
M: Fulfill my prophecy
W: I'm here to fill it
M: Fill it, fill it baby
W: OoOH AAHH
E: Fill it!
M: Fill my pro-woaaah nooo
E: Fill it, FILL IT NOO
W: No NOO
M: Alright, come on, come on.
E: Wade, you've got two more chances.
M: Fill that prophecy baby
W: I've got two seconds
M: Fill it, fill that prophecy!
W: One second! NOO
W: *screaming*
M: Aw...
Mark: I WIN!
I WIN!
I WON
E: Go fuck yourself
M: I will! I will gladly do that.
Yeah!
