Hi.
Ben. I actually did come dressed as
Elizabeth
Warren today.
I'm a divorced mom of four
children and because of personal
tragedies
in my life I'm raising two boys
who have a distinct lack of positive
male role models in their life
and I'm wondering what can women in
my situation do to
foster a sense of positive male
identity.
In this climate of
toxic anti man hate.
I mean I do think it's a great
question.
Good good for you for number one
good for you for
worrying about that issue because
there are too many people who don't
think that you have to make an
active
attempt to find people who you think
are good positive
male role models and put them in
your son's life.
And I think this is true by the way
even if it were a
two parent family you want to
surround your kids
with good people who can have a good
influence
on them. There is a fascinating
study
about single motherhood in the
United States
and what actually showed is that the
single best
predictor of whether somebody was
going to succeed
or fail was not single
motherhood per say it was actually
the number of single moms in a
particular
area.
Meaning that if you could find a
surrogate father figures
then you did OK if you're living in
a heavily married area
with a lot of men around to model
particular behavior
you OK. So there's certain areas
of of life that men male
father figures still predominate.
Sports is obviously a big one.
Religious Institute excuse me
religious
institutions are obviously another
big one.
But you know I don't know whether
grandparents are in the picture.
You can give her the mic back for a
second
No my
father recently passed away.
oh i'm sorry to hear that
Her paternal grandfather
lived six hours away.
would
he be moving or is it not a
possibility.
And he's not like t.
that side of the family name calls
a lot. They call the kids retards
stupid.
Yeah that's not good.
But what I would suggest
is I mean are there men in your life
who you
feel are would make for good role
models.
Well in my church
we don't at the ages my kids are out
they're not around a lot of men.
But we have male missionaries.
They're 19 to like in their
early 20s so I have them over for
dinner
twice a month
and I try my best.
I just want.
can your sons be involved in any of
these groups where they're around
other men who
can provide a good example for them.
I have been trying to get men
into the children's organization
that they currently go to activities
for
and it looks like we will be getting
some
male leaders there.
That's great. Well I mean I think
that the fact you're
even thinking about it means that
your sons will be OK
because if you continue to seek this
out you will find
it.
So it's big.
I think the bottom line is good for
you.
I mean because again if.
Because being proactive in seeking
good
male role models is absolutely vital
for them. So again I have nothing
but praise for you. Thank you for
doing that.
Thank you.
