

Sometimes, life hands you so many things at once. Like, once in your life you had nothing, you feel like you've hit rock-bottom, and then suddenly, things turn around. You get so many things on your plate, and though that could be a good thing, sometimes, you feel like you're being handed too much more than you could handle.

That's why, right now, I am so surprised to be in the company of a guy who is now kneeling in front of me, asking me to marry him.

1

There's only your life, how you mess it

up, and who is there to save you.

Or who isn't.

-Mitch Albom, "For one more day"

A few months ago...

Hi, I'm Miranda Larsen, I'm sure you know me as Mindy, the youngest sister of Kim, Leigh and Caroline, and Drake's elder one. The one who's been in and out of rehab, the one who constantly messes up, the one who's an illegitimate child and didn't find out about it until she was seventeen. Yes, you've heard about me, but really, do you know my story?

I was eight when I first realized I was different. It was Kim's 16th birthday party then when I heard my mom talking to her so-called friends about...well, me. I heard her say "Miranda is a mistake", "She would never be like Kim", "She'll grow up to be weird and unlike all my other daughters..." Well, tell you what: I never wanted to be like Kim or any of them. I was happy in my own little world. My mom and I have never really been close, but I had dad. I always had dad. Or so, I thought.

I was a daddy's girl: He bought me my first painting set, staged my first "exhibit" (it was just my paintings being shown to our relatives and some neighbors and friends), and brought me with him when he would go all over Europe. Dad was my rock, my bestfriend, the reminder that even though I'm not like my sisters, and my mom seems to hate me, I still belonged in our family.

But the unthinkable happened. A few days after my seventeeth birthday, my mom went on a hissy fit and because I got a belly ring. She told me in my face that I was a disappointment and that my father should've just taken me away with him. Everyone in the house were astounded. I mean, my dad was there, how would he take me away? Dad asked mom what was going on, what she meant. She didn't answer for a couple of minutes until dad became really angry and forced her to tell him, tell all of us. She finally shouted that I am not his daughter; that once upon a time, she had an affair with our then gardener, she got pregnant, he said he would stand up for it but when she refused to go with him, because he was just a gardener, he ran away, leaving me with my mom. She didn't tell dad the truth because she figured it would be better that way; there are things you have to keep for yourself. And then that fateful day happened. I was shocked, but dad was definitely the most surprised out of all of us. We all thought he would leave, but he didn't. "We'll save this marriage." He said and that was that. Things never really came back to normal.

Mom was often away, Kim burrowed herself in her studies even more (she was in law school then), Leigh kept herself busy with work, Caroline with school and her social activities, and Drake with sports. Dad, well, he became busy, too. He asked Kim to handle the family's business for her, and he spent all his time in the library, reading books over and over until he fell asleep. We never really got to talk again, and that killed me.

I started drinking too much, spending my nights with random people in bars all over the city, trying to see who passed out first, who knew how to drink better. Alcohol became my friend, and so did some anti-depressants. Prozac, Xanax, you name it, I did it. At first, it was alright, I was getting by fine. We tortured artists always had this weird aura, but soon enough, my sisters found out about my vices. It was Kim who hit the roof and sent me to rehab, saying that if only she wasn't the eldest, she wouldn't have done anything about it. Honestly, I couldn't care less. Rehab did nothing for me. When I leave, I give myself a few days or weeks, and voila, there I go again. It was hard battling your addictions. Old habits die hard, they say, and my drinking just went on and on.

Until some two years ago when my dad found me sprawled inside my bedroom, and along with Caroline and Drake carried me to the hospital. I don't remember much about that day except when he told me that he was sorry. I told him I was sorry, too. And then I went back to rehab, promising myself that it would be the last time I went there. I needed to get my life back.

So, after that final rehab stint, I decided I needed a breath of fresh air, I needed to live somewhere else. And now, here I am, in New Orleans, with my auntie Muriel (my mom's youngest sister, and the best she has. Seriously, she's nothing like my mom. She's an artist, a very great painter, and she has always inspired me). Actually, I just got back from New York two days ago, after my sister Leigh's wedding. I'd probably stay here for another week or two and then I think I'm heading back to New York, stay in Leigh's flat for a while (which now belongs to our only brother, Drake) and see what happens. I met someone here in New Orleans, her name's Belinda, and she owns an art gallery downtown. She's also planning to go to New York, explore the city and maybe put up a gallery, too. Well, we're planning to put up one together. Besides...I really do miss my siblings. Kim, not too much, but everyone else, yes. And dad (okay, he's not my real dad but...)...Though I have no idea what to say when I see him, I miss him, too.

Oh, you're probably wondering about my real father. Will I ever try to find him? No, maybe not. He left me. I just can't go looking for someone who doesn't seem to want to be in my life, anyway.

Back to my life now.

I was going to get out of Auntie Muriel's house to go to Belinda's shop. I found her at the living room, her back to me. "Hey, auntie," I said, "Just going to Belinda's...You need any—" And then I noticed she was actually talking to someone. A guy. I presumed he was my age, or maybe a year or two older, he had shaggy hair, some stubbles, and beautiful brown eyes. Oh, and a vibe that says "I'm an artist"; Believe me, I know one when I see one. "Oh, hi," I said when I saw the guy. I was never really friendly, but after my last rehab stint, I just felt a whole lot lighter, and somewhat more open to other people. Okay, well, just to some...

"Hi," The man greeted back. When he smiles, he looks like James Blunt.

"Finally," Auntie said and smiled, "Mindy, I'd like you to meet Paul, he's a son of my good friend Anne, and this town's famous jazz artist...He just came back from Florence."

Paul laughed, "Come on, Muriel, that's too much."

"Nah, that's the truth." Auntie said.

"Well, hi, Mister famous jazz artist," I said, holding out my hand for a handshake. He took it and saw my tattoo, which I got after I got out of rehab for the last time. It was a flower; the head and petals were in my hand, and the stem and leaves were up my arm. It reminded me that I was a flower, and maybe, just maybe, it was my time to bloom.

"Hi," he greeted back, "What a lovely, tattoo."

"Thanks." I smiled.

"Oh, so listen," He said, "I was just inviting your aunt to my show at the Cove bar, you know, just down the street, I'll be there tomorrow evening, around 9...I decided to put a show since I haven't been here for quite some time...I have no idea if jazz is your kind of sound, but, I'd love it if you'd come."

The way he said it felt like he really meant it. Uh, what am I saying? "Yeah," I said, "Sure. I'll be there."

"Great." He smiled.

"I'm sure Mindy will love your music," Aunt said, "She's an artist herself. A painter, you should see her work."

"Wow, that I'd love," He said, "Runs in the genes, I should say?"

I laughed, "Aunt's still better than me."

"No, don't believe her," Auntie said.

"So, uhm, I should go," I said, "Running to Belinda's, she's waiting for me..."

"Belinda?" Paul said, "Belinda Moore? Blonde hair, blue eyes, balck and white canvass artist?"

"Yes, that Belinda. You know her?" I asked.

"Yeah," He said, "We were classmates back in High School. Wow, tell her I said Hi, and come along tomorrow."

"I will." I smiled, "See you."

"See you." He smiled back.

2

"I'm a wildflower

growing in the sunshine..."

-The Jane Dear Girls, "Wildflower"

"Hey, you..." I said as I went inside Belinda's shop and gave her a peck on the cheek.

"Hey, Miranda..."

"Shut it." I said and we laughed. I started going around the shop to get new paint tubes, those in mauve and yellow, and some new large canvass papers when I remembered Paul.

"Hey," I said, "Paul says hi, by the way."

"Paul?" She said, probably trying to recall who it was, "Paul, the jazz artist?"

"Yes, him."

"Oh my God, he's back?" Belinda exclaimed, "Wow."

"Yeah, he was talking to my aunt a while ago, back at home, he's inviting us to this show he has tomorrow evening—"

"We're going," She said happily, "You've no idea how great the man is. He sings so well!"

I laughed, "Bells, you're talking like you like the guy."

"Nah, don't be silly," She said, "We were friends, back in High school. He was an upperclassman, but you know, we artists flock together. We've lost touch in college, though, since I went to Columbia and I think he went off to NYU or something, but he comes back here every now and then, puts on a show, and then last year, he went to Florence. In Italy. I bet he knows how to speak the language now and even sing in Italian...Imagine that."

"Sounds like a dream..." I said nonchalantly.

"He is," She said, "But not for me, I'm just glad he's back, I haven't seen the guy in ages! And as you know, I am happily engaged."

I smiled, "I know! Do you think your future kids would be artists, too?"

"Who knows?" She said, "Besides, why are we talking about kids! Dan and I aren't even married yet!"

I laughed.

"But seriously," She said, "We must go to the show tomorrow evening. You'll see when you hear him."

"Well, in that case, I'm excited." I winked and she laughed.

3

"Why go through life unnoticed?" - Aquamarine.

The following evening, we went to that Cove bar. I couldn't believe my eyes. It felt like I was back in the 1920's or something—the bar had these faux palm trees surrounding the area, even inside, and some of the ladies were even in total flapper wear! Curled hair, extra red lipstick (you know how Charlie Chaplin's lips look like, yeah, like that, just extra red), and those fringy outfits.

"Wow," I told Belinda, "this place is exquisite!"

She laughed, "Wait 'til you hear Paul." She said and we looked for somewhere to sit. We found a table near the stage, and saw the band set up. A few minutes later, Paul went out and we heard the people cheering. People were cheering behind me.

"Hey, goodevening, everyone," Paul greeted, "I can't tell you how great it feels to be back..."

People clapped.

"Thank you," Paul smiled and went on, "Anyway...While I was in Florence," He paused, "I fell in love...but...let's just say, things happened and it's over now. But still...this song is for her, and for all of you, as well." He said and then he started singing his own version of Norah Jones' "Don't know why". It was really heartfelt, and I realized why all these people adored him (my aunt and Belinda included)—it was because he was a real, genuine artist. Like, his talent is just born, not made. He sang every line so good, you would almost forget that it is actually someone else's song. And his eyes—man, he has the nicest, deepest, most expressive eyes I've seen. He sang one more song, and another, and then some more, doing a full set. After which, the crowd roared and cheered. He went down the stage, talked to some of the audience members and finally, spotted us (well, after Belinda called after him, that is.)

"Paul, over here!" Belinda called out.

He looked at us, smiled and went over, "Hey, Belinda," He said, "It's been forever!"

"I know!" Belinda exclaimed as they hugged, "Geez, you're still so good!"

"Don't flatter me too much," He quipped and saw me, "And Mindy, hey..." He smiled, "I'm so glad you stopped by."

Belinda nudged me and smiled playfully.

"I'm so glad I came, too." I told Paul and smiled back.

"So, how are you?" Belinda asked, "How was NYU?"

"Oh, barely stayed there," He said, "Actually...I got out of college two years ago..."

"No way..." Belinda said.

"Well, it's the truth," He said, "And it's alright, I mean, music's really my passion."

"Yeah, you're quite good at it." Belinda winked.

"So, what about you?" He asked her, "Got good grades at Columbia, I suppose?"

She laughed, "Not as good as I had in high school, but it was fine..."

"And...you?" He asked me.

"Oh, uhm," I said, "I didn't really...uhm...go to college."

"Oh," He said, "That's alright. I don't think you need college, you seem smart and okay your way."

"Even if I was in rehab a couple of times before?" I don't know why, but I seem to have just blurted that out. But, whatever, at least I've been upfront with the truth.

"Don't worry," He smiled a bit, "You're not the only one."

But before I could ask why, we heard Daniel's voice in the background. Daniel is Belinda's fiancé. He was supposed to meet up with us hours back but his mom was being her usual self, which is, being over the top about most things, and being so fishy with details about his wedding to Belinda, even if it's months and months away.

"Sweetheart," He said as he kissed Belinda, "I'm really sorry. You know how mom's crazy about everything regarding the wedding, I had to keep reminding her that it was our wedding, not hers."

Belinda laughed, "That's alright," She smiled.

"Hey, man," Dan said as he and Paul hugged a bit, "It's been a while, I'm really sorry I didn't catch your set..."

"That's okay," Paul said, "Congrats, by the way, I always thought you two would end up together."

"She couldn't let me go..." Dan joked and we all laughed.

"Hun, why don't we go to that table over there and give Paul and Mindy here some room?" Belinda smiled at Dan.

"What?" Dan said, "Oh, well, yeah, sure," He smiled after a bit, "Get to know each other well, okay?"

"Bells," I said.

She just tapped me on the shoulder, said she'd see me in a few, and went off with Dan. She went back after a few seconds and whispered to me, "He's safe, don't worry," She said, pertaining to Paul, "Dan and I will just be over there..." She pointed to a table by the back door and went away.

Paul and I looked at each other and smiled.

4

"why'd you have to be so cute,

it's impossible to ignore you..."

Imogen Heap, "Goodnight and go"

"You wanna go out?" Paul asked, "I mean, you know, get some fresh air..."

"Yeah, sure," I said, and he led me outside the bar. There were some unoccupied seats at the bar's exterior and we sat on one near a beautiful, lighted palm tree.

"Drinks?" He asked.

"No, I'm alright," I said, "I try not to drink anymore."

He smiled.

"This place is beautiful," I said, "It's very unique. And you're really talented," I said, "I enjoyed your show."

"Thank you," He said, "You have to show me your paintings!"

I laughed, "Oh, you remembered?" I said, "Yeah, sure, maybe sometime..."

"I'm looking forward to that." He smiled, "So," He paused and then, "How long have you been sober?"

"Wow, direct," I said, "Well...It's been sometime, two years or so...It's not so easy," I told him, "I've been in and out of rehab for quite a while, since I was seventeen..."

"What happened?"

"Well," I said, "I learned that I wasn't my father's daughter...That I was the product of my mom's affair with their former gardener. And so, my father, or rather, the father I grew up with stopped talking to me..."

"Sorry." He muttered.

I smiled a bit and shook my head.

"I was in rehab, too, you know?"

I was surprised, "Really?" I asked.

He nodded his head, "I...uhm...actually, the past year wasn't just spent in Florence alone, I was also in a treatment facility..."

"Whoa...what uhm...what happened?"

"Uhm...I...lost someone."

"Someone?"

"Selina. The girl I was in love with in Florence."

"Oh, that's really awful, I'm sorry."

"No, don't be, you didn't know," He said, "besides, it's good to talk about it to someone, you know, one who won't judge or anything..."

"What happened to her?" I asked.

"Skiing accident," He said, "We went to Scotland one Christmas break and...we were skiing, she jammed her foot into a pole, fell in this snowhill and hit a tree...it was really bad. I didn't think she'd die though. I didn't think she could die just like that. But the doctors said she was already dead when I brought her to the hospital. I wasn't able to handle it well. I couldn't even...I didn't go to her wake, or her funeral, I can't, "He paused and then, "I loved her a lot, you know? So, for quite a while, I didn't' know how to handle my pain so I turned to alcohol...And then I realized I was throwing my life away so I checked myself in to rehab."

"That must've been really hard."

"It was," He said, "Still is. I still have those nights when I think about her, think about that day and what I could've done...You know, maybe if I was able to bring her to the hospital sooner, she would still be alive, she might even be here with me right now."

"That's not fair," I said, "It wasn't your fault."

"Maybe," He said, "But sometimes it just feels like it."

Silence and then I spoke, "So...have you gone to her grave already?"

He shook his head, "No," He said, "I really don't think I can...I left Florence wanting to leave everything behind there. It's all just too painful. Death's not really the hard part, grief is. It's like this big thing hanging over your head, reminding you of what went wrong, of what you've lost, of what you still think you could keep. And sometimes, it's not so easy."

"I'm sure it's not," I said, "But at least you've managed to build your life up again..."

He smiled a bit, "I'm trying," He said, "Just taking things a day at a time." He paused and, "So enough about me...What about you? How are you and your dad now?"

"I...uhm...I really can't say we're okay, we're fine but, I don't know...I haven't seen him in two years."

"Oh. I'm sure it's hard for you both..."

I nodded my head, "We were really close. I was a daddy's girl."

"I'm sure he still loves you," He said, "Maybe, you're just both afraid to you know, talk...Both of you have no idea where to start. By the way, you're not really from here, are you?"

"Oh, no," I said, "I'm from New York. NYC."

"We'll if you're from there, you sure could make it everywhere." He smiled.

I laughed a bit, "Yeah, well...I like it here," I said, "Auntie Muriel's really wonderful, everything's so artsy, it's perfect."

"Sure is," He smiled, "But don't you miss New York?"

"Well, honestly, I do," I said, "I miss my sisters, and my brother..."

"And your dad?"

"Yeah, of course," I said, "I'm just not sure if he wants to see me."

"Of course he'd want to," He said, "He may not be your real father but you grew up with him so I'm sure he misses you, and that he wants to talk to you, too."

"We'll see..."

"Are you planning to go back to New York soon?"

"Actually, yes," I said, "I promised my sister, Leigh, that I'm going home soon...Maybe in a week or two. Belinda and Dan are coming with me."

"That's cool," He said, "Well, not really, coz, you know, you're leaving and we just met...but anyway, there's always communication, right?"

"Of course," I smiled, "And besides, you're not really gonna miss me, you have your life out here, this bar, your friends..."

He laughed, "Nah, seriously, Mindy, it was nice meeting you, talking with you here...To be quite honest, I haven't been friends with anyone since...since Selina died. I kept myself closed off and all..."

I smiled, "I know how that feels."

"So, uhm, when you get back to New York, what are you planning to do?"

"Well, Belinda and I are planning to start an art shop there, same as what she has here..."

"Awesome," He said, "I should be there when it opens."

I smiled, "You sure must be."

"And...what about your real father? Are you planning to look for him?"

"Oh, that, no," I said, "I honestly couldn't care less about that person. First, I don't even know him, and secondly, why would I look for him if he left me in the first place?"

"He's still your father..."

"But he's not my dad," I said, "Never gonna be."

He just nodded his head, but I have no idea if he agrees with me or not.

"So have you been singing for a long time now?" I asked.

"Yeah," He answered, "Since grade school. Music has always been my passion."

"You're good at it."

"You're sweet." He said.

"Nah, I'm serious, I'm surprised why you haven't got a record deal yet."

He laughed, "I haven't really been thinking about that," He said, "What matters is I'm happy with what I do, coz you know, if you're not, then what's the matter, right? You've got to do what your heart tells you to do."

"Wow."

"Wow?"

"I just never thought people like you still existed," I said, "But well...New Orleans proved me wrong."

He smiled, "By the way, I'm serious, when are you gonna show me your paintings?"

"You really wanna see them?"

"Of course," He said, "Why won't I want to? Will you be at your aunt's place tomorrow? Can I come by sometime in the afternoon?"

"Yeah, sure," I said, "Just don't laugh when you see them."

"You're sounding too humble," He said, "I'm sure you're great."

I laughed, "Well then," I said, "You shall see."

5

"She grew wild, wild yet innocent..."

-Keith Urban, "Stupid Boy"

"So, this is your room," Paul said the next day as he went into Auntie Muriel's house where I was staying. I led him to my room for he wanted to see my paintings. To be honest, I was kind of scared, my paintings have always been rather personal, but I felt like sharing them with Paul was a good thing. After all, he was also an artist.

"Yes, it is..." I answered.

"The mural's beautiful," He said, pertaining to the mural on my wall. Auntie was kind enough to allow me to do anything I wanted with it. Paul went on, "The flowers look real...they're wild and all, just like you,"

"Wild? Do I look wild?"

He laughed, "Sorry," He said, "I meant, you're like a wildflower."

"Oh," I said, "And why is that?"

"Well," He said, "For starters, you're not like anyone else. You're beautiful, and fragile, yet you have this very strong aura in you. You look tough, but inside, you're this little girl. And you go with the wind, even if sometimes you falter, you get back on track...At least, that's what I see."

I smiled, "You didn't tell me you were a poet, too." I said.

He laughed, "I'm not," He said, "you, however, are a very powerful painter."

"Powerful?"

"Seeing this mural, and those paintings you have right there, I think you know how to speak your mind too well. And that's good. Not all people have that talent."

"Can you understand what my paintings mean?"

"Well, we artists do have our own interpretations, don't we?" He said, "But I sure could try..."

"Let's see," I smiled, making my way to one of my paintings. It was this little girl looking at a house. It was in oil, and the girl was painted in black, like a shadow. "So," I said, "What do you think about this?"

He looked closely and then spoke after a few seconds, "Well," He said, "I think this painting is about you. You're the little girl and she looks shadowy because you feel like you're shadowed by what happened in your past. You're looking at the house because something inside is something you want, something you need to get back to. In this case, maybe it's your dad, your family, you want to get back to the old days..."

Wow. It was like he was reading my mind. How did that happen? "That was good." I said, "I made that recently," I said.

"It's beautiful." He smiled.

"Do you know that one time I had this black, white and red mural back at home? The words "pain", "I'm sorry" and all those stuff were on it?" I said, recalling my mural at Leigh's house.

"I assume that was during one of your lowest moments?"

I nodded my head, "During those times, I felt like I didn't know how to go on anymore. I felt like a helpless child, like I was just waiting for anyone or anything to save me from the pain I've been feeling. And...I was sorry."

"What for?"

"For being the way I am," I answered, "For disappointing them. For turning to alcohol—"

"We all have crosses to bear," He said, "And, as humans, sometimes we can't help but waver."

I smiled a bit and took a deep breath, "So, let's move on?"

He nodded his head and pointed to another one of my paintings. "I like that one," He said, pertaining to my painting of a face torn in half. The left side is this beautiful girl, looking like a child, looking innocent, while the other half looks much like a punk star, wild hair and all. He went on, "I think that depicts you."

I laughed, "Well, yeah, sort of," I said, "There's always two sides to a person, right?"

He nodded his head. "I think I'm a bird and a man."

"A bird and a man? Interesting..."

"Can you guess why?"

I bit my lip and then, "Hmm...Could it be because you fly off too much?"

He laughed, "Could be."

"You know a lot about art," I said, "I won't be surprised if you've done a few paintings of your own."

"Well, I did."

"You did?"

"In Florence."

"I knew it!" I exclaimed, "I must see them."

"I want to, but unfortunately, they're all ashes now..."

"Ashes?"

"I burnt them," He said, "I couldn't...keep 'em."

"Oh," I muttered, "Why?"

"Because," He paused and, "Most of them are portraits of Selina..."

"Oh," I muttered, "I'm really sorry."

"It's alright," He said, "I just...I can't keep them. I cannot be reminded of her. No, that's bull, she's still in my thoughts...What I meant was--"

"You didn't need any reminder of her in your face?"

"Yeah."

I nodded my head, "No one wants that."

"Well, I think I still haven't heard about your lovelife..." He said as he plopped down on the bean bag near my bed, "Well?"

"Well, there's nothing to say, really."

"Really?" He said sarcastically.

"Okay, two boyfriends, back in high school, but they were both jerks, and I was more in touch with art so it never worked out, and then a hook-up while in rehab...No, make that some hook-ups."

"Juicy."

"Shut up." I laughed as I sat down on bed. Talking to him felt like talking to a long lost friend. I know, I know, you've all heard that before, that's the core of every story out there, but really, that was how it felt.

"So, you've never really fallen in love?"

"Never."

"Really?"

I sighed, "Fine, there was this one guy, back in eight grade...We were twelve, I was infatuated...and then he got himself an older girlfriend."

He laughed, "Isn't that illegal?"

"Well, they're married now."

"Whoa."

"Hot stuff, huh?"

"I bet he doesn't look too hot, though."

"Yeah, you're right," I said, "He actually grew up to be one fat, greasy guy."

"And fat greasy guys don't deserve true artists like you." He smiled.

I smiled back. "Can I ask you something?"

"You just did." He said.

I laughed, "Don't try to channel Dumbledore. What?"

"Fine, ask away."

"What was...Selina like?"

He looked at me for a couple of seconds without saying anything.

"I'm sorry, you don't—"

"It's okay, you asked," He said, "Well," He went on, "She was a nice woman. She loved music, she sang with me in Florence, she's very smart, a math wizard, if I may say, but she's very timid when it comes to that. She always enjoys a good laugh, is very sweet, loves macaroons, and has this cute Italian accent. She has blue eyes, the color of the sea... My parents loved her, especially my mom..." He paused and I can tell that this was making him emotional.

I held his hand, "I'm so sorry," I said.

He shook his head, "I never really loved anyone before her. I was gonna ask her to get married, you know? After we went skiing, I was supposed to propose to her. And then...and then she was gone, just like that."

"I'm sure she's looking down on you right now and she's proud of what you've become."

"What?" He said, smiling a bit, "The part that I went into rehab?"

I smiled, "The fact that you got out of it and that you're trying to get your life back."

He took a deep breath, "I'm sorry for being an emotional wreck," He said, "I just...I never really talk about that with anyone."

"It's alright," I said, "You can talk to me."

"Thank you," He said, "So, well...I almost forgot, tomorrow's the Cove's anniversary, would you wanna come? There's free food and loads of jazz artists...Oh, and my parents are gonna be there, too, they're coming home from Florence, as well..."

I smiled, "That'd be cool. I'll be coming."

"I'll pick you up around 8:30, would that be okay?"

"Perfect." I smiled.

6

"sweet like candy to my soul

sweet you rock and sweet you roll

lost in you, i'm so lost in you

and you can come crash into me,

and I into you..."

-Dave Matthews band, "Crash"

The festival was in full swing. Singers took turns on stage, some of the audience members were dancing in their complete flapper gears, heaps of food were on the big table..."This really is a feast!" I told Paul happily as we went to a cocktail table.

"Sure is," He smiled, "Oh God..." He muttered.

"What?"

He pointed his lips onstage, "Those are my parents..." He said.

"What?" I muttered and then turned to look up on the stage, too. I saw his parents, and noticed the big resemblance. Paul's dad looked very much like him, except with gray hair, and his mom was beautiful—Paul obviously had inherited her eyes. She had long brown curly hair flowing down to her waist, and she was wearing a pretty blue dress and big chunks of necklaces. They were singing "All that jazz" from the movie Chicago. Both of them had wonderful voices. I found myself clapping and cheering for them. Soon after, they went down the stage, and found Paul and I. They kissed Paul on the cheek.

"So, mom and dad, this is Mindy, she's Muriel's niece, and she's also an artist," Paul introduced and his parents gave me warm smiles, "Mindy, this is my dad, Reed," Reed shook my hand, "and my mom, Cecelia—"

"Chi-Chi, dear," Cecelia said as she shook my hand, "everyone calls me Chi-Chi. It's so nice to meet you."

"It's so nice to meet you, too," I smiled, "And you were really good up there. No wonder why Paul has such great talent."

She laughed a bit, "You are too nice," She said, "You know what? You look a lot like Muriel when we were young, we were classmates in high school..."

"So I've heard," I smiled.

"You're an artist, too?" Reed asked, "I assume, a painter?"

I chuckled a bit, "You and your son are both psychics!" I joked and they all laughed.

"She's a painter," Paul said, "A good one, at that."

"Wow," Cecelia said, "that's good to hear...I've always been telling Paul to start painting again, but—"

"Mom," Paul said.

"I'm sorry." Cecelia said.

"Uhm, I think dad and I should get some drinks...and food, we'll be back," Paul said and left with Reed.

"I'm sorry about that," Cecelia said, "He's still affected about—"

"Selina?"

Cecelia nodded her head, "So, he told you?"

"Yes."

"He never really wants to speak to anyone about her. I guess there must be something in you, and that's good. He's never gotten friendly with anyone after Selina died..."

"He loved her a lot."

"Yeah, and I know Selina did, too," She said, "But it's good that he's finally trying to move on. Can I ask you a favor, sweetheart? I mean, I know we just met but—"

"It's okay," I smiled, "What is it?"

"Keep an eye on my son, okay?" She said, "He really has been through so much the past year and...and it'd kill me to see him fall apart again."

I nodded my head, "I understand."

"Thank you," She squeezed my hand. "So, I've never really seen you before...You're not from here, are you?"

"Oh, no," I said, "I was born and raised in New York...I just moved here after uhm...well...I've been in rehab so..."

"I see," She muttered, "Well, at least you're okay now."

"Yeah, thankfully..."

"Your mom is...?"

"Mylena," I said, "Uhm, she's auntie Muriel's second eldest sister, you know her?"

"But of course," She said playfully, "everyone knows Mylena."

"Oh...why does it feel like it's not a good thing?"

She laughed, "Oh, no, sweetie, it's not like that...It's just...Well...Mylena has this reputation of being uhm...well, she's been with almost every guy out here back when we were young. And then she moved to New York and never visited, and last we heard, she got married to this really rich guy but they divorced—Oh, God, I'm sorry, I'm horrible, those are your parents I'm talking about..."

"It's okay," I said, "Honestly, my mom and I were never close...We're too...different."

"I can see..." She smiled, "You're more like Muriel."

I laughed, "I know. She's an inspiration."

Just then Paul and his dad came back.

"Looks like you two are getting along..." Reed smiled as he handed us some mojitos. Paul put down a large tray of food on our table.

"Thank you," I smiled and sipped some mojito, "Chi-Chi was just telling me about my mom."

"Who's your mom?" Reed asked.

"Mylena," Cecelia said, "Mylena Anderson. I'm sure you remember her..."

"Oh," Reed said, "Yeah well..."

"Yeah well?" Cecelia said, "You almost went to the prom with her!" She teased.

"That's not true," Reed said, "I mean, how would you know? We were fighting then..."

Cecelia laughed, "You had a crush on her."

"Not until I met you."

"Here they go again, talking like little kids..." Paul quipped and I laughed.

"Are you high school sweethearts?" I asked Reed and Cecelia.

"Yes, we are," Reed smiled, "She courted me."

"Shut up!" Cecelia said, giggling, "He asked me to get married when we were fourteen! Can you believe that?"

"And they tried to elope when they were sixteen but mom's dad found out..." Paul said.

"Wow," I exclaimed, "Why, you two are such lovebirds. Cute." I smiled.

"Do you have a boyfriend, Mindy?" Reed asked.

"Oh, no, I've been really busy with my art..." I said.

"Well, you know, Paul here's single..." He added.

"Dad," Paul said, "Sorry." He looked at me. I just smiled.

"Reed! Chi-Chi!" Someone called out from the background.

Cecelia turned to look at who it was, "Oh, those are some of our friends," She said and held Reed's hand, "We'll leave you two alone for a while..." She smiled and went with Reed to see their friends.

"My mom, the social butterfly..." Paul quipped as he drank some mojito.

I smiled, "I like your parents," I said, "They're nice. And sweet. And in-love. Unlike my parents and my dysfunctional family..."

"At least they have you," He said, "You're exceptional."

"Stop being too sweet." I smiled.

He shook his head and chuckled, "So...your parents...are they friends? I mean, after the divorce and all..."

"Well," I said, "They're okay. They're both dating some other people now...as far as I know, mom's been dating a different guy like, each month or so...and dad's with this girl named Dana...Leigh told me she's nice. I've yet to meet her, though..."

"And how does that feel?"

"How does what feel?"

"Your parents' situation."

"Oh," I said, "To be quite honest, it's good that way. At least, my dad got his life back, my mom's free to do anything she wants and I'm sure they're both glad this is how things turned out."

"Wanna dance?" He suddenly asked me as a Michael Bublé song started playing.

"What? Oh, no, I don't—"

But he already grabbed my hand and dragged me to the dancefloor.

"I don't do this, you know?" I muttered as I put my hands on his shoulders.

He chuckled, "You're blushing." He said.

"What? No, I'm so not..."

"You are," He smiled playfully.

"Because you're making me dance and I don't even dance!"

He laughed, "Fine," He said, "Come on, let's just go back to our table..."

"Aren't you gonna sing?"

"Well, I—"

"Paul wants to sing!" I shouted to the guy setting up the keyboard on stage.

"Hey, hey, hey, no," Paul said, "I wasn't really planning to—"

"Come on, you're a star!" I teased him.

"Go Paul!"

"We want Paul!"

The crowd was cheering and the man on stage called him up. I pushed him a bit, laughing. He went on stage unsteadily and looked at me.

"So, hey people," He started, "Happy anniv, Cove! Uhm...my friend over there," He pointed at me, "wanted me to sing this song for you..." He then whispered something to Mister Pianoman and went back to the mic. The first few notes of Savage Garden's "Animal". I couldn't help but laugh. Couples were dancing everywhere; some even said "hi" to me. Paul came back to me after his song.

"What the hell?" I muttered with a smile on my lips.

"What? You liked it."

I nudged him, "Shut up." I said, and we laughed. I bet my heart is even smiling in the inside, if that was possible.

7

"Sky falls, it's a beautiful day, don't let it get away..."

-U2, "Beautiful day"

"Good morning, sunshine..." Auntie Muriel greeted me the following morning as I found her in the dining room.

"Oh, God, I'm so sorry..." I said. What happened was this: I passed out last night due to the number of cocktails and mojitos I drank and when I woke up this morning, I found myself in my room. "I'm screwed," I went on, "Geez, I feel like a virgin drinker!"

Auntie laughed, "Well, Paul and his parents brought you home last night..."

"He was...he went here with his parents?"

"Yes, Chi-Chi likes you..."

Oh, maybe not anymore, I thought.

"She actually sent these strawberries this morning," Auntie said, pointing to a pack of strawberries on the table with a note pinned to it, "She said you need some fruits." She winked.

Geez, can it get any more embarrassing?

"Thanks," I muttered.

"Okay, Miranda, I'll just be meeting a friend, okay?" She said, "You think you'd be okay here?"

"Yeah, yeah, thanks."

"Call me if you need anything."

I just nodded my head and she went away. I sat down on a chair and pulled the pack of strawberries from the table, untangling the ribbon and shoving a piece in my mouth. I then opened the note from Paul's mom.

Hey Mindy,

Just thought of sending you some fruits, you passed out so bad last night, I feel responsible! It was nice meeting you...ring us soon 

Chi-Chi

Oh, man. Of all the things I could do in New Orleans, I became wasted in front of people I just met. Great, just great. I opened the fridge and got myself a glass of water. I then heard the phone ring. I went to the living room and answered it.

"Hello?"

Leigh's overly happy voice came booming, "Mindy! Hey, Neil and I are currently in Hawaii, I just thought of giving you a call, you know...We're heading back to New York tomorrow...How are you?"

"Oh, uhm, wow, that's...great...I'm—"

"Mindy? You sound so...wait...Are you drunk?"

"No,"

"Minds,"

"Okay, yes, but that was last night, I didn't do it on purpose—"

"Mindy! Why?"

"Leigh, calm down, believe me, it was an...accident? Well...I mean, I was with a friend and his parents, and we were all celebrating the anniversary of this legendary bar here and then...that's it. Honestly, after what seemed like an eternity of being sober, I feel like a first time drinker. My head hurts like hell right now and I sure wouldn't want another drink in the near future."

"I just don't want you to, you know, get down that path again. You've worked hard to be where you are now..."

"And where exactly am I now?"

"New Orleans." She joked and I laughed.

"Don't worry, Leigh, I'm okay," I said, "Nothing to worry about. So, how are you? Are we expecting a honeymoon baby?"

She laughed, "Who knows?" She went on, "So...you coming home soon?"

"Yeah," I said, "In a week or so, I guess..."

"Good," She said, "We miss you."

"You all just saw me at your wedding..."

"I'm serious, Minds, it's different with you not being here..."

I laughed, "Well, don't worry, sissy, I'll be there soon."

"Good."

Someone was ringing the doorbell.

"Wait a sec," I called out.

"Is that your doorbell?" Leigh asked.

"Yeah," I answered, "I think I better go. I'll see you soon."

"K," She said, "You take care, no more alcohol, see you."

"Yes, ma'am..." I said and we both clicked off our phones. I went over to the door and opened it. There stood Paul, his eyes gleaming, wearing this really nice preppy top and Levi's jeans. I looked at myself and my unflattering almost ragged sundress. One more time: Great, just great.

"Hello, Cinderella," He greeted.

"Excuse me?"

He laughed as I ushered him to come in. "You said you wanna be Cinderella..."

"No, I didn't..."

"Yes, you did." He said, "In fact, my mom was laughing so hard last night. You said, 'Oh, it's always Caroline who gets to be Cinderella at home'...and now she has her Prince charming, I want my own Prince Charming...'"

"Oh, no, tell me you're joking."

"I sure am not." He said.

"Geez, I'm screwed."

He laughed, "I didn't know you could get so red in the face when you drink!"

I rolled my eyes, "Your mom sent me strawberries."

"Oh, that, yes," He said, "Last night you kept going on and on about how you wanted your own strawberry farm!"

"That was my childhood dream..."

"Thought so." He winked.

"Oh, God," I sighed, "Just uhm...thank your mom for the strawberries, okay?"

"Sure will."

"I will never drink again."

He laughed, "You are too cute," He smiled, "Honestly, I'm sorry too, I mean, I shouldn't have allowed you to drink too much."

"It wasn't your responsibility, really."

"Anyway...I was just uhm...checking up on you."

"Thank you, I'm alright," I said, "Actually, my sister called a while back, asking me when I'd get home to New York..."

"And what did you say?"

"Maybe next week...After all, I promised her. I'm planning to go back by Sunday..."

He nodded his head.

"So, uhm...well...I just remembered, it's aunt Muriel's 43rd birthday on Friday, and since it's probably my last week here, I'm thinking of giving her a celebration...You know, so I could also say thank you for everything she's done for me."

"Sounds cool. I think my parents would wanna be there, and also Belinda's mom, and then of course, Dan and Belinda..."

"Yes, I was thinking about that, too."

"Great," He said, "Let's see...maybe we could, you know, give her some gifts? Like, personal paintings, or songs, you know, any artwork or so..."

"She'd love that." I smiled.

He smiled back, "I'll take your aunt out on Friday, tell her I need some advice on buying a...shirt?"

I laughed, "Whatever."

"Yeah, anyway, I'll take her out, then you, Dan and Belinda could prepare things here in the house."

"Aye, aye, captain." I winked.

8

Sometimes you have to lose your mind to find your freedom.

I never planned birthday parties before, but since it's auntie Muriel's birthday, and I'm leaving soon, I'm doing this. Belinda and I were preparing the cake we made all by ourselves, and Dan was cleaning up the living room, preparing the music and fixing the decors. Belinda's mom and Paul's parents soon arrived and by 7 pm, we heard Paul's car arriving. We closed the lights and waited for him and auntie Muriel to come in. Auntie Muriel came in first, opened the lights, and we all came out of our hiding places, "Happy Birthday!" We all shouted in our cheeriest voices.

"Oh, my," auntie exclaimed, "Wow."

I hugged her, "I just wanted to say thank you for everything."

"Hun, you didn't have to do this." She smiled, "I should have done a farewell party for you, since you're leaving like, tomorrow evening..."

"Nah, I'll visit you."

"Mindy's leaving?" Chi-Chi said, "Oh, why?"

"Oh, uhm, I...well, I promised my sisters..."

"Oh," She said, a bit saddened.

"Come on, this is supposed to be a celebration!" I said, "Come, let's eat. Oh, and no alcohol."

They all laughed.

***

After dinner was the gift giving portion that Paul and I thought about.

"So," I started, "we're all here to give you a piece of our minds," I went on, "And of course, a piece of our hearts." I smiled, "Bells?"

Belinda nodded and took out something from her bag. It was a box of a ring. She opened it and out came a pretty little ring with a Ruby gem sitting on top.

"I'm not really sure if you remember this," She said, "But when I was in sixth grade, and having the worst insecurities about myself and my art, you gave me this, and it cheered me up..." Auntie smiled and Belinda continued, "So, now, I'm giving it back. I mean, with Mindy going home and Dan and me coming with her, I know you could do with a lot of cheering up." She handed her the ring.

"Thank you." Auntie smiled.

"Okay, okay, my turn," Belinda's mom, Anne, quipped, "So, Muriel, we've been friends for years and...and you know we've shared everything, but one thing I wasn't able to share with you is," She said as she pulled a scarf out of her bag. It was a white scarf with Pink batik prints all over, "this!" she exclaimed and auntie laughed, "Okay, I know all of you here are probably wondering why...so...let me tell you. Once upon a time, when Muriel and I went to college, she wanted this scarf as a reminder of me. And I didn't give it to her, thinking she's being crazy, but now I realize why...Sometimes, we keep things because it reminds us of the people we love. And this scarf? It was made by Muriel's one and only love, Arturo, and I'm so sorry it took me so long to give this to you. I know he's gone, but this would be a reminder of how much he loved you."

Auntie's eyes filled with tears, "Thank you," She said as she hugged Anne.

Next up was Paul.

"Hey, uhm, well, Muriel here is really an inspiration to all of us. I mean, living here and having her drop by your house, her vibe is just...magnifique," He smiled, "and I thought of making a song for her...I'll sing a few lines."

Auntie clapped her hands. Paul then started singing.

She's beautiful,

And wonderful

She likes rock and roll

She makes you smile

Takes off your frown

She's the coolest aunt this side of town...

"You are amazing," auntie said as she clapped her hands, "You shall win a grammy."

"I'll keep that in mind." Paul winked.

"That was beautiful..." I whispered to Paul.

"You are." He said and I was surprised. It was the his parents' turn.

"We've known Muriel for years," Chi-Chi said, "And we know this will mean so much to her. No, this already means a lot and she deserves to have it." She handed auntie a parcel and auntie opened it. Inside was a painting—a portrait of Auntie back when she was young. I think she was around 17 or 18 in the portrait. I saw her eyes fill up with tears. The painting was beautiful; auntie was stunning—her long dark brown hair in curls, her eyes gleaming, she was holding a hat and some flowers.

"Oh my..." Auntie muttered, holding the painting.

"Arturo made that before he died in Spain," Chi-Chi said, "We bought it from a museum. You deserve to have it."

"Thank you, I just...I can't..." Auntie cried. I looked at her and smiled. "Thank you," She mouthed.

"Well, I still have my gift..." I smiled, "And though I know it won't hold any much value as that, and though I know it won't make up for everything you've done for me, I just wanna let you know that I'm really thankful, so, I made this painting just for you..." I opened a parcel in front of me. It was of auntie's face now, older, wiser, and for me, a whole lot more beautiful. "That's you, as you, because you seriously are one of the best people on earth. And I'm proud that you're my aunt."

She hugged me, "I'm proud that you're my niece."

I smiled, "To Auntie Muriel!"

"Cheers!" They all said.

***

"Thank you," I told Paul mush later that evening as he was about to go home, "This means a lot."

"Anything for you." He smiled.

We were quiet for a moment and then he spoke.

"So," He said, shoving his hands in his pockets, "You're leaving."

I nodded my head. "But uhm...I have something to show you. Can you come by tomorrow afternoon?"

"Sure," He said, "Of course."

I smiled, "Thanks," I gave him a peck on the cheek, "See you."

"See you."

9

"I'll spend forever wonderin if you knew, i was enchanted to meet you..."

-Taylor Swift, "Enchanted"

"Ready for my surprise?" I asked Paul the next afternoon when he came over to the house.

"I sure am," He said.

I smiled and we went up to my room. I closed the door behind us. There was an unopened parcel on the floor.

"So?" He said as he looked at me.

I picked up the parcel, noticing my luggage, which was now packed. I stood up and handed the parcel to Paul.

"That's for you," I said, "Open it."

He did and my painting, the one I did just for him came into view. It was a portrait of his face, John Lennon style, you know, with the glasses and all.

"Wow," He said, "Wow..."

"Do you like it? I'm sorry, it was rushed and—"

"Are you kidding me?" He asked, "This is beautiful. It's exceptional...Mindy, you didn't have to—"

"I wanted to." I smiled, "You were a good friend."

"Were?" He smiled, "Hey, not just because you're leaving does it mean you're losing me."

"I know," I smiled, "But still..."

He held my hand. Surprisingly, I didn't budge. "We'll still see each other," He said, "Besides, I have more to be thankful for. You helped me open up again...Well, maybe not to everyone, but...being with you, spending all these time with you, it was really wonderful. You're wonderful."

I smiled, "I'll miss you," I said, "And your parents!"

He laughed, "We'll keep in touch." He said.

"You must."

We sat down on bed and didn't say anything for a while. We just stayed there, enjoying each other's company, enjoying the silence. Enjoying what we had left.

"So," He said, "What are your plans? Is that shop with Belinda it?"

"I don't know," I said, "Who does?" I smiled, "Maybe, I'd even put up my own hole in the wall shop at home...Leigh's house, I mean. I'm staying there with my brother."

He nodded his head.

"What about you?" I asked.

"I don't know," He answered and smiled, "There's always the Cove..."

"Of course," I said, "They love you there."

He took a deep breath, "Will Belinda and Dan pick you up?"

"No, they're taking a later flight..."

"I see," He said, "So...uhm...well...can I bring you to the airport then?"

I smiled, "I'd love to." I said, "Just be sure not to cry, okay?"

He laughed, "You be sure not to cry."

"Shut up."

He smiled, and I smiled back. It was goodbye.

10

It's a funny thing about coming home—looks the same, smells the same, feels the same...You'll realize what's changed is YOU.

-The Curious case of Benjamin Button

"Are you sure they don't know I'm coming?" I said as I was speaking to my brother, Drake, on the phone. They were at Caroline and her husband, Robbie's place that Sunday lunch. I wanted to surprise them. After all, what's coming home without a blast, right?

"Positive," He spoke, "Where are you?"

"Near." I said, "K, I'm almost there...Wait for me at the gate, be subtle. See you.

The cab dropped me off in front of Caroline and Robbie's humble abode. It was beautiful—white picket fence, lots of flowers, two cute dogs. Home sweet home. I carried my luggage and found Drake by the gate.

"You have so many bags!" He said as he helped me off with one.

"Shut it," I quipped.

"Dang, I missed you."

"I missed you, too." I smiled, "Now, let me in."

He laughed, "Fine," He said and we walked to the front door. "Where's everyone?" I asked him.

"Dining room," He said, and I allowed him to lead me inside, leaving my bags at the living room.

And then, there they were.

Sitting in Caroline and Robbie's dining room was my family. Well, can I still call them that? They all looked at me and I couldn't tell if they were excited, or just shocked. I couldn't tell if they were happy, or if they just wished I was gone. Maybe, I'm thinking too much.

Mom was with this Latino-looking guy whom she was with at Leigh's wedding, feeding him cherries when I arrived. She almost crushed the goblet of water she was holding. Dad was with this girl, Dana, his girlfriend. Dana smiled at me, while Dad gave a...I don't know, it was this look he gave me at Leigh's wedding. A look of embarrassment? I don't know. And then there was Leigh, with her husband (and bestfriend, I always thought they would get married, Neil), Caroline with Robbie (who's probably scared of me up to this point. I mean, I was drunk out of my wits when we first met at Kim's wedding), and then there's Kim and Mark and their three little kids.

"Surprise," I smiled.

"You bitch!" Leigh joked, "Why didn't you tell me you were coming home today?!" She hugged me.

"Well, I wanted to surprise you guys," I said, "Except for Drake, of course."

There was laughter.

"Welcome home," Neil smiled.

"Thanks." I smiled back.

Caroline hugged me with tears in her eyes, "Finally," She said, "We all missed you."

"I missed you, too." I then looked at Robbie, "Hello..." I smiled.

"H-hi," He said, "Welcome back."

I then caught Kim's eye. We never got along. Well, none of us really got along with her before, but they all seemed to love each other now, I wonder if there's still a place for me left in this family.

"Hi," She said, hugging me. She never hugged me before.

"Hey," I said.

Her husband, Mark, smiled at me and I smiled back.

"Hello little kids," I said as I knelt to say hello to Mark and Kim's kids.

I stood up again and saw my parents and their, well, partners.

"Hi," It was Dana who spoke first, "We're glad you're home."

"Thanks," I said. She was a nice woman, or so Leigh said.

"Yeah, welcome back, sweetheart," Mom said.

Sweetheart? Eew. "Wow, sweetheart..." I muttered and smiled a bit, "Thanks..."

"We're glad you're back, Miranda," Dad said, without really looking at me.

I nodded my head, "You look uhm...good, dad."

"Thanks," He said, "You do, too."

"Sit down," Caroline said and offered me a chair next to her.

"Wow, so, uhm, you guys always do Sunday lunches?" I asked.

"Oh, just sometimes," Drake said, "but today Caroline said she and Robbie are gonna announce something..."

"Ooh, hot stuff," I said, "I guess I came home right on time, then..."

Caroline laughed and nudged me.

"Yes, Caroline, I think it's high time you tell us what it is..." Mom prodded.

Caroline took a deep breath, "Well," She started, "Uhm...I'm sure you're all thinking like...when would Robbie and I become parents or so...well...I could tell you that....that we won't be."

"What?" Kim asked.

"Carol, dear, you can't say that, you don't know what's in the stars for you..." Mom said.

"Oh, actually, we do," Caroline said, "Uhm...I'm...infertile. Robbie and I couldn't have kids."

"B-but t-that's fine," Robbie said, "I love her, and we'll...we'll just see what happens."

"Of course that ain't fine," Mom said, "That's...Well, the essence of being a woman is about having kids—"

"Of course it's not," I said. Oops, Mom Vs Mindy is back, "I think kids won't make you complete. I mean, it's not the only thing that could make you complete. There's always art, passion, love, or whatever..."

Mom sighed, "But—"

"I think it's fine," Dad said, "Caroline and Robbie is a functioning couple. There's always adoption, and if they don't want to, then that's their decision."

"Thanks, Minds, dad," Caroline said and smiled, "So, yeah that's it. Robbie and I are fine, and happy, and we just wanted to tell you the truth. Now, enough about us, why don't well all just turn the attention to Mindy...she just came back, we wouldn't want her to go away again just because we're dysfunctional, aren't we?"

I laughed, "Well, I'm the most dysfunctional one."

Leigh shook her head, "Nah, Neil is."

We laughed.

"So...you're...you are the one from rehab?" Enrique asked me, in full latino twang.

"Why, yes, I am," I said, "And I sure could tell you used to smoke pot before...No, no, make that last night?"

He blushed.

"Sorry," I said, "You have stoned eyes."

"Miranda," Mom said.

Caroline, Leigh and I laughed.

"I'm glad you're back," Leigh whispered in my ear.

I smiled.

"Excuse me," Enrique said, "I'll just be in the...bathroom..." He said and stood up.

"Enrique!" My mom called out and then looked at me and shook her head with a sigh. She followed him.

"Oh, little lovebirds," I muttered and smiled, "Sorry..."

Leigh laughed, "See? That's what we missed!"

***

"We're really glad you're back," Caroline said as she, Leigh, Kim and I were left alone in the dining room, after lunch.

"Yeah, it was boring without you," Leigh said, "And at least now, someone can babysit Drake..."

I laughed, "I'm sure he doesn't need any," I said, "How's that girlfriend of his? Cheska or something?"

"He keeps on saying they're just friends," Leigh said.

"Oh, like you and Neil!"

She laughed, "Well, that's different..."

Kim laughed and drank some water, "So," She said, looking at me, "How are you?" I could tell there was something different in her—like, she has this lighter aura, like, she's no longer miss busybody who's trying to prove to everyone that she's on top.

"I'm good," I said, "New Orleans was great. And Auntie Muriel was wonderful...It's so classy and artsy there."

She smiled, "For what it's worth, I'm glad you're back."

Wow, what a surprise. "Wow."

"Wow?" Kim said.

"I just never thought you'd be glad to see me back."

"Hey, you're my sister."

"I know," I said, "But I'm not like you."

"Well, no one's like Kim," Caroline said.

"Yeah, no one can be like Kim..." Leigh winked.

"Shut it, you two," Kim said, "I know I've been a bitch to you three growing up...but...I'm sorry."

"Oh, so you know?" I joked.

"Come on," Kim said, "You guys are way better than me."

"Kim being humble, wow..." I quipped.

We all laughed.

"Imagine if we all got along before..." Kim said.

"Well, then we won't be where we are now," Caroline smiled, "Things happen for a reason, ya know?"

More laughter, "So," I said, looking at Carol, "what are your plans?"

She shrugged, "We're just enjoying each other's company right now," She said, glancing at Robbie at the porch, "I love him he loves me, we're married and happy. Kid or no kid, we're alright. Actually, we're thinking of getting back to traveling the world...Okay, just Europe first, starting next month."

"Cool," I said, "Don't forget the souvenirs."

"We sure won't." She smiled.

I smiled back and looked at Leigh, "You know, I still can't believe you're married. I mean, you, of all people!"

She laughed, "I know," She said, "But well...I love Neil."

"Yeah, that's what I've been trying to tell you all those years back but you kept your focus of nasty Chris!"

"Well, at least, I learned." She winked, "Kim here's the surprise...I mean, she's so motherly now, who'd have thought?"

"Yeah, I never thought about that before..." Kim said, "But what can I say? Mark and I are passionately in love."

"Yuck!" The three of us said in unison.

Kim laughed, "Okay, seriously, those kids, are my life." She smiled, probably thinking of her darling children, "So," She said, "Mindy, what are your plans? I mean, with dad..."

I shrugged, "I'm not so sure about that."

"Well, yeah, that's complicated..." Leigh said, "But one of you has got to have some nerve to say something."

"Oh, let's just cross the bridge when we get there..." I said.

Leigh drank some water, "Hey, by the way, you told me last time that...you know, you were at a party with someone and his parents...Is he a guy?"

"Gossipmonger!" I quipped and we all laughed.

"Come on, spill!" Leigh said.

"Well, yeah, he's a guy," I said, "And we're just friends."

"Yeah, like we haven't heard that before..." Caroline said sarcastically.

"I'm serious," I said, "He's nice, and attractive and charming, and he's a singer, but...well, that's that. And he's still in love with his ex-girlfriend who accidentally died in a skiing incident in Scotland."

"Oh," Leigh muttered. "But still...we'd like to meet him sometime." She winked.

"Yeah, we sure do." Caroline added.

"Well, fly to New Orleans then."

Leigh said, "You know, I have a feeling he'll follow you here."

I just laughed.

"We should go out sometime," Caroline said, "the four of us, you know, girl bonding or something...We haven't done that before. I mean, well, the three of us did for sometime, and then there was just Leigh and I, but Kim, we never did it with you..."

"Well—" Kim said.

"Well," Leigh said, "I'm in, and you should be, too. I'm sure Mark wouldn't mind."

"Fine," Kim said.

"Let's get it on," I smiled.

11

"iI lived in stories

but inside i kept a mystery"

-Mandy Moore, "Extraordinary"

"Mindy?" Drake called out from outside my bedroom in Leigh's house the following morning, "Uhm, some people are outside looking for you, they said they're your friends from Orleans..."

Oh, God, I thought. What time is it? I glanced at my bedside drawer and noticed that it was already 3 pm. 3 pm! I never wake up like this anymore. But well, maybe because I'm back in New York, and I went out with my sisters last night so...

"I'll be downstairs in a bit," I told Drake and hurriedly got out of bed.

"You're here!" I said as I saw Belinda and Dan downstairs.

"We are!" They exclaimed and we all hugged each other.

"Come on in," I said and closed the door behind them. Drake was in the kitchen.

"So, this is you here..." Belinda said, "Nice place."

"Uh-huh," I smiled, "It's Leigh's pad but she's married so Drake and I are allowed to use it...Where are you two staying, by the way?"

"Chateau Marmont," Belinda smiled.

"No way, seriously?"

"Stop messing around, B," Dan smiled, "Nah, just some apartment out there...It was my cousin's but since he's in Chicago, he said I could have it, til we find a house."

"Awesome," I said.

Drake came out of the kitchen and brought us some juice and cookies, "I'll just be outside," He said.

"Fly away," I smiled.

"So..." Dan said, "We were thinking..."

"Yeah, we were," Belinda said, "And..."

"And?" I said.

"And we think that maybe...well...maybe you'd want to sell your paintings."

"My paintings?"

"Yeah, you're a really good artist, and you know, maybe you could do it online, put them on etsy, or create your own website, start right there..."

"Whoa, so you wouldn't want me as a business partner anymore?"

"It's not like that," Belinda said, "It's just, you're more than that, you know? You're more than selling easels or something. You need to show the world what you can do, and we know you're perfectly fine at doing that in your own home. And...well...Dan and I are planning to get married here like, real soon, like next week. In Vegas. And we're bringing you there to see us get hitched."

"Wow."

"I know," Dan said, "But...I can't wait for B and I to have our own family."

I smiled, "Okay, okay, I understand."

"Please don't be mad?" Belinda said.

"Are you insane? Of course, I ain't mad." I smiled, "You two should've been married ages ago!"

They laughed, "Don't worry," She said, "We'll still be around for you."

I smiled, "I'll be alright," I said.

Belinda smiled, "So," She said, "You and Paul?"

"What about Paul and I?"

They looked at each other.

"Aren't you two together already?" Dan asked.

"What? No, of course not..."

"Whoa..." Belinda said.

"Why?" I asked.

"Nothing, it's just that...we thought you two hooked up! And...well, you look perfect together..."

"Why, thank you but we're just friends."

"Oh, please," She said, "The chemistry's like, so obvious!"

"Okay, okay, chill," I said, "Paul and I...we're both just trying to get our lives back, you know? Love can't come into play..."

"Whatever," Belinda said, "So...anyway, we'll just book our flight, get you your Vegas ticket and we'll all be there next weekend, k?"

"Like I have a choice..." I said sarcastically and Belinda shot me dagger looks.

"Fine," I said, "I was just joking. Chill."

12

"It's a beautiful night,

and we're lookin' for something dumb to do,

hey, baby, I think I wanna marry you..."

-Bruno Mars, "Marry you"

Vegas.

You know those cheesy Vegas weddings with a fake elvis? Yeah, this was one of those. And, yeah, I always thought those weddings were crazy, but seeing Belinda and Dan getting married...It's like, actually, they're like, too in love to be doing this. And yes, it may be crazy, but hey, do you actually know a couple who's not so crazy to be in love? I couldn't help but smile and clap for them.

After the er, wedding, the three of us went to the Bellagio, with Belinda's mom and Dan's parents. We went up the elevator and went inside a really grand room, lit up with...disco balls. Some people were there, too, though I barely recognized them. Wow, It clearly is a party, huh?

"Congrats, you two!" I greeted them.

"See who's playing the sax..." Belinda winked at me.

I looked up front and saw who it was. And of course, I couldn't be wrong: It's Paul. And he's here in Vegas, too. He was playing this jazzy tune and boy, was he good at it! After his set, he congratulated Belinda and Dan and he saw me. Those eyes are piercing, I'm telling you. In a good way, though.

"Hey, you," He smiled as he saw me.

"Hey," I shot back, "That was bloody good," I smiled, "You really are jazzy."

He laughed, "Who knew I'd be playing in Vegas?"

"You could play anywhere!" I exclaimed.

"I missed you," He said.

"I missed you, too." I told him.

"I never catch you online!"

"Oh, uhm, right." I said, "Sorry, I was just..."

"Thinking that I would never get in touch with you?"

Whoa. He's reading my mind again. Was I that obvious? "Well..." I muttered.

"I sent you a couple of e-mails." He admitted.

I smiled, "Fine," I said, "I'll check 'em. So...how long are you gonna stay here?"

"Oh, I'm going home tomorrow, what about you?"

"Yeah, just until tomorrow, too," I answered.

"How's being back in New York, huh?"

"To be honest," I said, "I didn't expect it would be good. You know, my sisters and I went out last week, it was amazing! I never thought I'd enjoy a night-out with Kim being there..."

"That's good to hear," He smiled, "And your dad?"

"Oh, uhm...we still haven't spoken—"

"Why not?"

I just shrugged.

"Look, it's really none of my business, but I think someone has to say something, you know? Make the first move and all...I mean, you can not just stay away from your dad forever, and he can't do the same either..."

"I know," I said, "But I just don't think I...could...I don't know if I could do it alone."

"I understand," He said, "You know what? I think I could come with you. But I need to go back home first, then probably come to New York next week or so—"

"You really don't have to, I don't wanna take so much of your time..."

"It's okay," he said, "I want to. It's the least I could do."

I smiled, "Well, in that case then...thank you."

He smiled back, "Come, let's eat, there are loads of food here...all for that lovey-dovey couple there...Who knew they'd want a Vegas wedding?"

I laughed, "They're crazy in love, ya know?"

"Sure are!" He shot back and held my hand, leading me to the buffet table. It was gonna be a good night.

***

The following morning, Paul and I were at the airport with Dan and Belinda's parents. Dan and Belinda wanted to be left alone. Of course. A honeymoon in Vegas? Perfect.

"So, see you next week?" Paul said.

I smiled, "But, really, no pressure..."

"Relax," He said, "It's all good."

"Thanks."

"So...bye again?"

I nodded my head, "I'll be seeing you."

"You sure will." He winked.

13

Where would we be if we couldn't dream?

One of the first things I did when I got back in New York was check my e-mail for messages. Paul's messages. And yes, there they were, a couple of them.

From: paulspears@gmail.com

To: mindy_larsen@gmail.com

Hey...you in NY now? How's it goin? I just wanted to say...thank you, for everything. You are exceptional, and the painting...it's amazing, thanks, really, thanks a lot. I wish I could make it up to you. So yeah, keep in touch, okay?

I miss u already.

He missed me? Wow. And then, there was another one.

From: paulspears@gmail.com

To: mindy_larsen@gmail.com

Hey minds...was just wondering if you got my e-mail? Come on, tell me stuff. I love new Orleans, but meeting you, it made this place some kinda boring. And I am not bluffing.

Hope you're havin a fun time! Hollaback.

Boy, was he sweet. There were still a few more—it was like, he –mailed me every day since I left! Wow. And then suddenly, this little box on the left side of my screen buzzed. Googletalk.

Paulspears: hey pretty lady.

Mindy_larsen: paul! Hey you...back in NO?

Paulspears: sure am. Early mornin' and you're online, huh?

Mindy_larsen: I just wanted 2 check your uhm, messages.

Paulspears: hahaha. 

Mindy_larsen: why?

Paulspears: nothing.

Mindy_larsen: so...you missed me?

Paulspears: I believe I told u that last night.

Mindy_larsen:  honestly, paul, I missed u, too. It was good seeing u again last night.

Paulspears: and good thing u didn't drink! Hahaha

Mindy_larsen: oh, shut it. Haha

Paulspears: so what r u doin?

Mindy_larsen: drinking ice-cold coffee at the dining table with my laptop in front of me because I'm talking to a true blue jazz artist ;)

Paulspears: u flatter me, u know? Wait, ice-cold coffee?

Mindy_larsen: uh-huh. I'm not a big fan of hot coffee, actually.

Paulspears: figures.

Mindy_larsen: hahaha. What are u doing?

Paulspears: well, I'm still in bed...with my laptop, talking to an enchanting visual artist.

Mindy_larsen: enchanting. I like that word. Reminds me of fairies.

Paulspears: do u believe in fairies?

Mindy_larsen: seriously, hunny, when alcohol's in your system for so long, u believe everything...or maybe, nothing.

Paulspears: hahaha. Fairies in strawberry fields...sounds like a dream.

Mindy_larsen: u just gave me an idea about a painting 

Paulspears: that I'd love to see.

Mindy_larsen: now you're putting pressure on me!

Paulspears: I can wait forever. ;)

Mindy_larsen: u sly romantic!

Paulspears: I didn't know u knew that word.

Mindy_larsen: what? Sly? :D

Paulspears: hahahaha. Seriously, u make me laugh.

Mindy_larsen: good. Laughing's good for ur body ;)

Paulspears: so, have u had breakfast already?

Mindy_larsen: i'm not really fond of breakfast...not when I usually wake up at 3pm.

Paulspears: I didn't know that!

Mindy_larsen: hahah well, that's because I never did it in Orleans.

Paulspears: oh. Why?

Mindy_larsen: well, for starters, Orleans is a pretty busy place, and well, my aunt's pretty busy with all those stuff she has to attend to, as u may know...and yes, NY is the city that never sleeps, but Orleans is the place that never really made me sleep...in a good way 

Paulspears: because...of me?

Mindy_larsen: assuming much? :D

Paulspears: I was just joking ;D

Mindy_larsen: hahahah I know :D

Paulspears: so, Cinderella, what are u planning 2 do today?

Mindy_larsen: oh, idk yet. But let's see...after coffee, I'd probably take a bath, then sit in front of my laptop again...try 2 do some painting...yadda yadda, nothing too exciting

Paulspears: doesn't matter. U yourself already are exciting.

Mindy_larsen:ooh...are u flirting with me, mister?

Paulspears: I guess I am ;)

Mindy_larsen: hahahah no, you're not.

Paulspears: I am.

Mindy_larsen: whatever ;D so..what abt u? plans for the day?

Paulspears: well...my mom's dragging me and dad to this play this evening.

Mindy_larsen: oh! I miss your mom. Tell her I said hi, okay? And what play is that?

Paulspears: her play.

Mindy_larsen: chi-chi acts? Wow!

Paulspears: hahaha oh believe me, u wouldn't wanna see her.

Mindy_larsen: u are such an unsupportive son. Bleh.

Paulspears: hahahahaha bleh.

Mindy_larsen: u can't bleh back!

Paulspears: who said so?

Mindy_larsen: me.

Paulspears: and why should I listen 2 u?

Mindy_larsen: because u love me.

Paulspears: hahahahaha gossip girl?

Mindy_larsen: pls don't tell me u watch gossip girl, too.

Paulspears: uh, no, not me, it's my mom.

Mindy_larsen: penn badgely is hot. Oh, shit. I wish I didn't say that.

Paulspears: I'm not jealous.

Mindy_larsen: hahaha it's not about u. I just remembered my sister's ex looks so much like penn! But he's a douche.

Paulspears: oh. Douchebags. Screw them.

Mindy_larsen: ikr?! And get this, he and my sister got back together for a time last year. Glad it didn't' work out. She's the one who's married to her former bestfriend now.

Paulspears: good for her. What's it like having four sisters?

Mindy_larsen: well, it's not nice being compared to them, however, growing up, leigh, carol and I always got along. But kim was a horror! And seriously, I still can't believe she's changed now. Really. But oh well...motherhood has its wonders, I guess.

Paulspears: haha I always wanted to have siblings.

Mindy_larsen: hahaha I always wanted to be alone!

Paulspears: u weird little girl.

Mindy_larsen: hahaha like you're not weird! ;D u know, if I get to have a daughter, I'll name her Wednesday...

Paulspears: hmm...sounds good to me. Our daughter will be Wednesday ;D I assume, that's because of addam's family? 

Mindy_larsen: u got that right. I was thinking of morticia but that's too...morbid.

Paulspears: Good God, good thing u noticed that.

Mindy_larsen: hahahaha I am mortician... boo!

Paulspears: and I'm Gomez

Mindy_larsen: u sure look better than Gomez

Paulspears: I know I do ;)

Mindy_larsen: hahahaha

Paulspears: ooh. And there u go, fallin in love with me even more. ;)

"Minds?" My brother Drake said, interrupting my chat-a-thon with Paul.

"What?" I said.

"Can I borrow your laptop?"

"What? Why? You have yours."

"It just crashed. And I have a presentation at school today, please, I mean come on, I'll be late. Please. I'll go home early...and besides, you never use that...until now. Whoa."

"But I'm talking to someone."

"Oh, please, it's just for a couple of hours! And who's this, by the way? A boyfriend?"

"None of your business, dummy!"

He laughed, "Come on, please, lend it to me."

"Fine," I sighed, "Just wait a bit.

"Great. Thanks."

Paulspears: u still there?

Paulspears: ok...1...2...3.....2000

Mindy_larsen: hey!

Paulspears: ok you're still alive.

Mindy_larsen: haha I'm afraid to say I'll have to just ttyl

Paulspears: oh, why? Hot date?

Mindy_larsen: oh, no, hunny, it's just my dear brother. Apparently he's laptop crashed & now he has to borrow mine for this school presentation.

Paulspears: I see...be a good sister then and let him borrow the laptop.

Mindy_larsen: of course I will. Be sure not to miss me, ok?

Paulspears: that I can't be sure of. ;)

Mindy_larsen: ttyl, paul 

Paulspears: sure, bella.

Mindy_larsen: I don't like twilight.

Paulspears: hahaha no, not twilight bella, "bella" in Italian...you know, beautiful ;)

Mindy_larsen: oh. 

Paulspears: come on now, your brother must be very mad.

Mindy_larsen: hahaha k. later.

Paulspears: later.  take care.

And then I shut down my laptop. "There," I told Drake, "All yours." I smiled.

"Thanks."

***

paulspears: you up?

Mindy_larsen: obviously  how was the play?

Paulspears: it was good, mom was a drag queen.

Mindy_larsen: she played the part of a drag queen? Wow!

Paulspears: haha yeah yeah. So how was your day? Glad your bro gave back your laptop in one piece. ;)

Mindy_larsen: I know! Hahaha well, I've been planning about this online store...

Paulspears: and how's it going?

Mindy_larsen: well, I'm thinking of you know, a site where in people could write me what they want as a painting...or uhm, where they could contact me, and so when we meet, I could do the paintings they want me to do.

Paulspears: cool. That'd be good. Have u already thought of a name?

Mindy_larsen: unfortunately...no.

Paulspears: hmmm...what about morticia's gallery? Hahaha

Mindy_larsen: hahahaha and let them think it's a mortician's gallery? Hell no

Paulspears: haha let's see...fairiesandstrawberryfields?

Mindy_larsen: I like the sound of that. Why not? 

Paulspears: cool. I deserve a thousand bucks for that name.

Mindy_larsen: kiss.my.ass.

Paulspears: oh you'd want that name?

Mindy_larsen: hahahahahahahaha but on second thoughts...

Paulspears: pls don't.

Mindy_larsen: HAHAHAHAHA

Paulspears: kissmorticia'sass

Mindy_larsen: hahahahahahahaha why are we talking about asses?!

Paulspears: idk lol

Mindy_larsen: hey..btw I discovered something, you sly guy.

Paulspears: what?

Mindy_larsen: you actually have a myspage and youtube page! Why didn't you tell me? The songs u have there are great!

Paulspears: well, u didn't ask...

Mindy_larsen: the idiot. Haha. Seriously, I wonder why these record companies still ain't getting u

Paulspears: competition's fierce, m'darling

Mindy_larsen: well, yeah...I know it is. But well, some of them poptarts can't even sing!

paulspears: haha masses love them.

Mindy_larsen: I love u.

Paulspears: what?

Mindy_larsen: oops. I love your music, I mean.

Paulspears: haha u told me u love me.

Mindy_larsen: oh quit it.

Paulspears: I love u too 

Mindy_larsen: hahahah shut it, sweetie

Paulspears: shut what?

Mindy_larsen: hahaha whatever

Paulspears: so are u planning to start the website now?

Mindy_larsen: yeah, guess so...

Paulspears: do it on tumblr, you'll be more popular there.

Mindy_larsen: if u say so.

Paulspears: I'll stay up with you.

Mindy_larsen: u will?

Paulspears: why not?

Mindy_larsen: aren't u goin to the cove or something?

Paulspears: nah, not tonight. Besides, I'd rather talk 2 u.

Mindy_larsen: now ain't that sweet? 

Paulspears: haha I am sweet.

Mindy_larsen: oh bugger off. Hahahaha wait, lemme do this tumblr thingy...

*an hour later

mindy_larsen: hey, Gomez, u up?

Paulspears: I sure am.

Mindy_larsen: it's done. Check it out and tell me what u think: fairiesandstrawberryfields.tumblr.com

Paulspears: lemme see...

Mindy_larsen: so, what do u think?

Paulspears: it's beautiful, although I think you should make your background something more u...you know, a scanned copy of one of your paintings or something. I think you could use the painting u gave me, I'll take a photo of it and send it 2 u so u could be inspired. ;)

Mindy_larsen: hahaha shut it. I think I could do with some of the stuff I have here...or make a new one. Fairies and strawberry fields...

Paulspears: now that's what I'm talking about!

Caroleverett: minds! Wow, u are online!

Mindy_larsen: I sure am, sister.

Caroleverett: wow. U never go online! This ha something 2 do with that guy u met on Orleans, eh?

Mindy_larsen: hahaha u could say that...

Caroleverett: I wanna meet him!

Mindy_larsen: oh I'm sure u will, he might be here next week, I'll let u know

Caroleverett: oh don't be silly! We can meet now. Chat conference, u know?

Mindy_larsen: oh ok, wait up

Mindy_larsen: paul? My sister caroline's online, she wants 2 uhm, meet u via this chat conference thing

Paulspears: oh that would be cool, I'm ready when u are

Mindy_larsen:  ok wait

Paulspears has joined the conference.

Caroleverett has joined the conference.

Caroleverett: hello paul! I've heard about u from my sister

Mindy_larsen: oh trust me paul, it's not much!

Paulspears: hello carol! It's nice to uhm, meet u

Caroleverett: it's nice 2 meet u too, paul! How's Orleans?

Paulspears: great, but it was better when mindy was here 

Caroleverett: aww ain't that sweet? Saw that, minds?

Mindy_larsen: haha don't bother trying to impress her, paul, she's married

Paulspears: u know I meant what I said, mindy.

Caroleverett: I know he did, mindy  God, u two should get together!

Paulspears: 

Caroleverett: oh! Did I say something wrong?

Paulspears: no, of course not. So, how are u and your husband?

Caroleverett: we are very happy. We can never have kids, but we love each other, and that's enough. More than enough.

Paulspears: now that's love...

Caroleverett:  so, what about u? uhm, I mean...are u better now? Have u already moved on from what happened 2 ur uhm...then girlfriend? I'm sorry about that. It must've been tough.

Mindy_larsen: that's enough, c.

Caroleverett: oh God, I'm really sorry, really, sometimes I can be so tactless and--

Paulspears: it's okay...

Caroleverett: I'm really sorry. Pls don't get mad at my sister.

Paulspears: I won't

Caroleverett: I should go. Hope 2 see u soon. Really sorry.

Paulspears: it's alright.

Caroleverett has left the conference.

Caroleverett: minds, I'm so sorry 

Mindy_larsen: u and ur big mouth!

Caroleverett: I know, I didn't mean 2 do it, I'm sorry

Mindy_larsen: yeah well...

Caroleverett: tell him I'm sorry, ok?

Mindy_larsen: yeah yeah. Go get some rest.

Caroleverett: yeah thanks. U too.

Caroleverett has logged off.

Mindy_larsen: paul? I'm really sorry about that. Sometimes caroline could really get to be tactless...and I'm sorry, I didn't mean 2 tell her about what happened to selina, it was just that leigh thought u were my boyfriend and—

paulspears: it's ok.

Mindy_larsen: it's my fault. I'm sorry.

Paulspears: don't be. I'm fine. Besides, I trust u.

Mindy_larsen: thanks. It won't happen again.

Paulspears: it's ok.

Mindy_larsen: u miss her, don't u? and now I made it even harder...

Paulspears: don't say that.

Mindy_larsen: sorry.

Paulspears: it's alright, I told u. u know, maybe we should just call it a night.

Mindy_larsen: yeah...I think so, too.

Paulspears: goodnight, bella.

Mindy_larsen: goodnight, belissimo.

14

Life is made up of meetings and partings. People come into your life for a few months, some a year, others a whole lifetime.

-Cecelia Ahern, "Thanks for the memories"

The following day, I was busy tinkering with my tumblr page, or more so, the page I created for my business. It's been good, so far a number of people left me messages with their particulars, wanting to get paintings of some sort. One wanted a shrimp—she said she was fond of collecting anything with shrimps on them. Another one wanted a self-portrait, he e-mailed me a scanned copy of his picture. I'm supposed to meet them tomorrow for a meeting about the cost and what else they want to happen with the paintings.

My sister, Caroline then came inside the house.

"Minds!" She said as she saw me plopped down on the sofa. She instantly hugged me, "I am so sorry," She said, "I didn't mean to say that to Paul—"

"Relax," I said, "It's okay."

"You're not mad?"

"Like I could..."

She laughed, "Oh, Minds..." She muttered as she sat down beside me, "Whoa, hey," She noticed my tumblr page, "That your page?"

"Uh-huh..."

"And you're selling paintings?"

"I guess I am."

"Geez, I'm so happy for you! This is awesome!"

"Just living by your example..."

She laughed and nudged me, "I like the name...Fairies and strawberry fields, reminds me of your childhood dreams..."

I smiled, "It was Paul's idea."

"It is? Wow..." She said and smiled, too, "You know, Minds, I think he likes you...but...But I think he's also still stuck-up in the past."

"You mean, the love of his life who died?"

"Exactly," She said.

"C, she died. He loved her, of course, it's gonna be hard."

"I know, I know," She said, "I'm not saying it's easy, it's not. But he has to cry his one last cry and move on."

I sighed, "I don't think he really did cry that way."

"What?"

"He never went to her grave, or anything. He can't."

"Oh," She muttered, "That's....even harder."

"I know."

"Do you like him?"

I looked at her.

"Minds?"

"I don't know."

"Of course you do. It's obvious."

"Fine," I answered, "I guess I do. Or maybe, I don't. Maybe I really just like talking to him, being his friend. We get each other, you know? He's a jazz musician, I'm an artist. Together, we're perfect. But I'm not sure if that means we're perfect for each other. What if we're bound to be just friends and I ruin this?"

She nodded her head, "Are you scared?"

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and answered, "I guess we both are."

15

Love happens accidentally—in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.

Paulspears: hey you.

Mindy_larsen: hey...I thought u would never talk 2 me again

Paulspears: that's not gonna happen

Mindy_larsen: if u say so...

Paulspears: so how's the site?

Mindy_larsen: good. I'm meeting some clients 2mrw  then I'll be visiting Belinda and dan after.

Paulspears: I knew u'd do good. 

Mindy_larsen: that's bcoz u believed in me.

Paulspears: well, I have some news for u

Mindy_larsen: oh! What is it?

Paulspears: an agent from this top recording company told me that they might want to produce an album for me...

Mindy_larsen: oh my God! That is awesome! I'm so happy for u, paul!

Paulspears: thank u...I still have to send them an original demo before I go there in NY

Mindy_larsen: I'm sure u could do it 

Paulspears: I know. I've the perfect inspiration. 

Mindy_larsen: u have to let me hear that thing...or at least, see the lyrics?

Paulspears: of course I will

Mindy_larsen: can't wait 

Paulspears: I should start writing tonight...I'll hit u up soon, ok?

Mindy_larsen: break a leg!

Paulspears:  give my regards to dan and b

Mindy_larsen: I will...'night, paul

Paulspears: 'night, mindy...

***

"Oh my God, that is just the coolest thing ever!" Belinda exclaimed after I told her about Paul's offer from the recording company when I visited her in her new apartment the following day. Dan was out, looking for a job. "Finally! It's just about time!"

"I know," I smiled, "He sure deserves this."

"So, how are you two?" She asked as she drank some juice.

"We're good, still friends—"

"Friends my ass." She said, "Come on, I'm sure you're subtly flirting or something..."

"B, you know he's still sad over some things..."

"Well, whatever, he has you now."

"It's not that simple."

"It should be that simple," She said, "You love each other, what else is there to prove?"

"Let's just see how it goes. Anyway, he's coming here next week."

"Wow! See? That's what I'm talking about!"

"Oh, sorry to burst your bubble, sweetie, but again, it's not like that. He's just...going to accompany me to...see my dad. Well, the one I grew up with."

"Oh." She said, "Are you...nervous?"

"Honestly, I have no idea how I'm feeling. I mean, it has been a while since we last talked."

She nodded her head, "You'll be alright. Paul won't let you down."

I smiled a bit.

"So...uh, these things he's sad about, have you been talking about them?"

"No, not really. I mean, sometimes I just don't know how to ask him. He's a strong person...I really couldn't...I don't know."

"Paul never really talks about his emotions," She said, "He tends to uhm...run away. Focus on other stuff. His music, you know..."

"Yeah, I think I saw that."

"Maybe you should prod him on it," She said, "He trusts you."

"I'll try my best."

***

A few days later, I found an e-mail from Paul.

From: paulspears@gmail.com

To: mindy_larsen@gmail.com

Hi minds. Here's the song I wrote. Tell me what you think.

"Fairies and Strawberry fields"

She's a wildflower,

She blooms through the summer

She makes me swoon, takes away my gloom

she's a fairy, living in strawberry fields

she's Cinderella who found her own shoe

she sees me through

she's a ray of sunshine,

glimmering on the run

she has a tattoo,

oh, she beats you

I could tell her I love her

But I have no idea how to

She's fragile, and strong

She's lost, and found

She's you and me

And yet she's she...

She's the fairy who loves strawberries...

There was a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. The song just felt so...real. That was the first time when I knew I had fallen in love with a guy named Paul Spears.

16

A very few times in life, if you're lucky, you meet someone who was exactly right for you. Not because he was perfect, or because you were, but because your two combined flaws were arranged in a way that allowed two separate souls to hinge together.

Paulspears: u got it?

Mindy_larsen: yes.

Paulspears: what do u think?

Mindy_larsen: it's beautiful. Really beautiful.

Paulspears: it's for u.

Mindy_larsen: wow..uhm...thank u. I just...the song, it almost made me cry, paul, no one has written something like that for me before. It's special.

Paulspears:  glad u like it.

Mindy_larsen: thank you.

Paulspears: no, thank u. I gtg for a bit, I have to send that to the recording studio...I'll see u soon, ok? Like, real soon, really.

Mindy_larsen: take ur time. 

Paulspears: take care, Cinderella.

Mindy_larsen: take care, paul.

***

Some two days passed and I woke up with a call from an unidentified number.

"Hello?" I greeted into the receiver as I tried to get up from bed. It was 7:30 in the morning.

"Did I wake you up?" It was a familiar voice. A voice that unmistakably belonged to Paul.

"Paul? Is that you?"

"It sure is, Morticia," He said, "Good morning."

"Hey...where are you?"

"I think I'm in Central Park..."

"In New York? You're here?"

"I think I am."

"Oh my God, you are here!"

He laughed, "Yes, sweetie, I am. I got into this hotel in the wee hours of the morning, took a short nap and now, I'm here."

"Geez, you didn't tell me today was the day!"

"I wanted to surprise you."

"Well, you surprised me, all right."

"Can you see me today? But no pressure, I mean, anytime will do. It's still early, anyway...I just wanted to wake you up."

"Are you kidding? I'll be there in a bit."

"Okay, I'll just have a pretzel and wait for m'lady..."

I laughed, "I'll see you."

***

A few minutes later, I was there. I wore this light blue dress with some chiffon trimmings and some really large necklaces. And I saw him. He was wearing this black trenchcoat, a white tee and denim jeans.

"Paul!" I called out.

He looked at me and instantly walked to my direction.

"You are here!" I exclaimed and we hugged, "God, I'm sorry..."

He laughed, "I missed you." He said.

"I missed you, too."

We were sitting on a bench while eating hotdogs and some soda.

"Can you believe that I've never been here in New York before?" He asked me with a smile on his face.

"Wow. Why not?"

He shrugged, "No reason to. And besides, I always thought New Yorkers were snotty...until I met you."

I smiled, "And here you go, flattering me again."

He laughed, "I'm serious." He paused, seeming to remember something and then, "Selina wanted to go here, though."

"Oh."

He took a deep breath, "It was one of the things I regret. Not bringing her here."

"You didn't know what would happen."

"Yeah, but..." He took another deep breath, "Anyway...do you want to go to your dad's place today?"

"I was thinking that maybe you'd wanna visit Dan and B first..."

He fixed his gaze on me and held my hand, "We have all day to do that. And don't worry, I already called them after I called you."

"It's still early."

He shook his head and smiled, "Fine. After lunch, then?"

"Yeah." I said unsurely.

"Okay, let's go to Dan and B's first...let's go buy some food."

"Let's." I smiled.

***

"Are you kidding, man?" Dan said while the four of us were eating burgers at their apartment, "Those recording people would be crazy to turn you down!"

Paul laughed, "Well, whatever happens happens."

"We sure you'd make it," Belinda said, "And well, while waiting for that, there are a few bars out here...Wait, how long are you planning to stay here, by the way?"

"I don't know, really," He said, "Maybe, a few weeks? Months? We'll see."

"Man, you could stay here at our place, it's much cheaper than a hotel..."

"Thanks." He smiled.

"So, okay, you two are going to see Mindy's dad later?"

"Yes," He said, "I just wanna do the right thing, you know? They deserve to talk."

"Hello, I'm here..." I muttered and they all laughed.

"You think you're ready to face him?" Dan asked.

"Maybe, I don't know, we'll see." I answered.

"Yes we will." Paul muttered and squeezed my hand.

17

She understood what it was like to stand

right in front of people you loved, even though they could not see you.

-Jodi Picoult, "Second Glance"

"You look nervous." Paul told me as we got out of the cab and were now standing in front of my dad's house. My old house. The house I and my siblings grew up in. It felt like forever since I've been here.

I tried to smile a bit, "I guess I am."

He put an arm around my shoulder, "Don't be. I'm here."

I looked up at him, "Thanks." I smiled.

I took a deep breath, "Okay, this is it," I said as I rang the doorbell. I wonder if dad will come out, or if a maid will. Who knew if he had a maid? Or maybe, Dana's living in with him. I didn't really know. Seconds later, someone opened the gate.

Daddy.

I saw the look of surprise in his eyes, how his mouth opened but no words came.

"Hi," I muttered.

"Mindy," He said.

"Good morning, mister Larsen," Paul greeted.

"Hi, you are?" Dad extended his hand.

"Paul," Paul answered, "I'm a friend of Mindy's from New Orleans."

"Oh, hello." Dad said, "Come in."

He led us into the house and it felt familiar yet unfamiliar. This was the house I grew up in, and yet, I feel like a stranger. Like I never really belonged here.

Dad told a maid to make us some drinks then he told us to sit down. It was a new couch. Maybe, dad didn't want to keep any memorabilias of years gone by.

"So, what can I do for you?" He asked.

"Go on," Paul told me silently.

I couldn't speak for a few seconds until I decided I had to. "I just...uhm...I wanted to...to talk to you," I said, "I'm sorry. For everything."

"Mindy, you don't have to," He said and took a deep breath, "I'm the one who should be sorry. I didn't take it in all well...I didn't know how to handle it all, I stopped talking to everyone, to you, and believe me, I didn't mean to. It's just...It was just that during those moments, seeing you...seeing you reminded me of your...father."

I nodded my head, "I'm sorry mom did what she did."

"It wasn't your fault," He answered, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you that before."

"It killed me, you know?" I started crying, "Because...because you and I have always been close. You always got me, you were my rock...and then...and then suddenly, it all changed and...I felt alone."

"I didn't want you to feel that way."

The maid came and put the drinks down on the table.

Dad held my hand, "I'm proud of you, Mindy." He said, "I'm proud of how far you've come, of who you are now...And I'm so sorry for not being there for you all these years, for not being there when you needed me the most." He then stood up and hugged me and I hugged him back. I feel like a little girl, holding on to her father, wishing and hoping that everything will get back to the way they once were.

He looked at me after we hugged and smiled. I smiled back.

"You can stay here if you want to," He told me, "This house is empty now."

I smiled, "I'll visit whenever I can." I told him, "Wait...what about Dana? Isn't she living here?"

Dad shook his head, "No, she's living alone...We both think it's a big thing to move together."

"Oh," I muttered. "Dad..well...can I still call you dad?"

"Of course," He said, "You'll always be my daughter. Always. That is, if I could still be your dad."

I laughed a bit, "You're my only dad."

He smiled, "So...have you seen Manuel?"

"Manuel?"

"Your father."

Cripes, I didn't even know my real father's name. "Oh, no," I answered, "I mean, I don't intend to..."

"Why...not?"

"He ruined our lives," I said, "And besides, I'm fine with knowing you and I are fine."

He nodded his head and took a deep breath, "Wait a bit," Dad said and stood up and made his way upstairs.

Paul took a deep breath, "I'm sure a heavy weight has been lifted off your chest..."

I smiled at him, "Yeah," I answered, "Thanks."

"He seems like a good man."

"He is." I answered.

"You grew up here?"

I nodded my head, "Yeah, this was home...Well, at least back then. Leigh and I loved playing hide and seek here, I mean, it's a ginormous house!"

Paul laughed, "Yeah, yeah, it is."

Just then my dad came back and handed me an envelope.

"What's—" I said and then saw what was written on it.

Melinda Larsen

My mom's name and our address was written in a loopy handwriting. Beneath were two addresses: the address of this house, and the address of someone named Manuel Aspel.

Manuel Aspel.

Manuel.

My father.

"He sent that here while you were in rehab," Dad spoke, "He probably thought your mom still lives here. I didn't open it and nor did I give it to your mother. I figured this day would come," He looked at me, "And...I thought that maybe, it's best that you give it to her...and visit him, if you'd want to. It's your decision."

I nodded my head, "Thanks..." I muttered.

"Dad," I started again, "Aren't you mad at him?"

He smiled a bit, "I was," He said, "But then I realized he was the one who lost something. He didn't see you grow up, he didn't have the moments I had with you."

I smiled.

"You could have dinner here, I'll ask Isa to make you your favorite dishes—"

"It's okay, dad," I said, "But I think I'll pass...for now."

He nodded his head and I knew he understood.

***

I opened the door of Leigh's house and saw Drake and his friend (well, that's what he said) Cheska plopped down on the couch, watching a movie. It was "Valentine's Day", I think.

"Whoa, hey," Drake greeted.

"Hi," Cheska smiled.

"Hi," I shot back, "Guys, this is Paul. Paul, Drake and Cheska."

"Hello guys," Paul greeted.

"Hey, man," Drake shook his hand and so did Cheska.

"You guys already ate? Should I call anyone, anything?" I asked.

"Oh, we're fine," Drake answered, "There's still pizza in the oven, you can heat it up..."

"Thanks," I said, "See you." I then made my way to the dining room with Paul following me. I sat down on a chair, still holding the envelope.

"Mindy, you're tense." Paul said.

"I know I am."

He held my hand, "Look," He said, "It will be fine. Listen, why don't I come by tomorrow and we can go to your mom's place, wherever that is...What do you think?"

"Yeah, yeah, you're right," I answered, "Strike while the iron is hot."

***

The following day, Paul and I were in a cab, on the way to mom's apartment somewhere near 5th Avenue. Mom living in an apartment. That's quite a shocker.

When we finally arrived, Paul and I went up the stairs and knocked on room 3-C. A couple of knocks later, Enrique, the stoner, mom's boytoy, opened the door. He was only wearing a wifebeater and some boxers.

"Oh, hi," He said.

"Hey, Enrique, right?" I said, "Is my mother—"

"What is it, love?" I heard mom's voice.

"Your daughter's here." Enrique said.

"Oh, who? Wait—" Mom came rushing to the door, her hair in curlers while she was wearing a tight pink robe. "Miranda?" She said when she saw me.

"Yeah, it's me." I said.

"Oh," Mom said, "Come in."

Paul and I went inside and she told us to sit on the couch. She sat on a chair near the center table. I couldn't imagine mom living in a place like this. Okay, it wasn't bad, really, but compared to our old house, dad's house, this looks like a rat's hiding place.

"Who is this guy?" Mom asked, eyeing Paul.

"Sorry," I muttered, "Mom, this is Paul, we met in New Orleans. Paul, my mom."

"Pleasure to meet you," Paul extended his hand.

Mom just smiled, "Yeah, you too," She looked at me, "Miranda, what are you doing here?"

I took a deep breath and opened my bag. I handed her the letter from my father.

I saw how mom's eyes widened at reading what was written on the envelope, "How did this—"

"Dad gave it to me." I said.

She looked at me then opened the envelope and read the letter inside. I didn't know what was in there. After a few minutes, her eyes started to well up with tears. She couldn't look at me for a while.

"Mom?"

She took a deep breath and stood up, "Come with me, Miranda." She said and I followed suit. She led me to their back porch, with a view of some of Manhattan's shops and café's. She looked at the surroundings for a little while without saying anything.

"Mom—"

"He has cancer," She said, "This...this letter was dated over two years ago. He has cancer...He said he was sorry, he wanted to see you..."

"He...what—"

"I didn't know," Mom stifled a tear, "I didn't know..."

My father, my real father has cancer. And he might even be dead by now. It's all too much to take in.

Mom kept on crying and I couldn't say anything for a while.

"I'm sorry," Mom said, "It's just...I....didn't know..."

I nodded my head, "Did you love him?"

A little smile crept up her face, "He was my first love," She answered, "We went to high school together, back in New Orleans, and then we went here. And then...and then I met your dad. He was every woman's dream—rich, good-looking and he was very nice. And so...I left Manuel." She paused and then, "Then years later, when I was pregnant with Leigh, he came back. His dad met him in this agency and got him as our gardener. Funny how the world works, huh?" She smiled at me but there were tears in her eyes, "I saw him and the very first thing I told him was that he needed to go away. He told me I was being irrational, he needed a job. I told him I'll pay him just so he could go, he told me he didn't need my money. And so he stayed and your dad, he didn't know about Manuel's connection with me. I got pregnant again, this time, with Caroline, and by then, your dad was extremely busy with work, therefore, I spent most of my time with Manuel since he was at home. After Caroline...that's when things got rocky between me and your dad. I realized that...that we really had nothing in common, but who was I to throw it all away?" She looked at me, "I know you might not believe me, but I care for my family." She sighed, "And then it happened. One night, while your dad was away yet again on a business trip, Manuel and I came to talk. He said he still loved me, he wants to make me happy, he'll do anything...anything to make our dreams come true. We were supposed to get married, you know? We had all these plans but...I met your dad. Manuel cried to me that night. And then...and then, we made love." She paused, "I was so mad at him the following day, but it was then that I realized that I still loved him, and I was mad at myself for throwing everything we had away. Btu it was too late, I didn't wanna leave your dad. He had everything, we had everything, Mindy. Manuel told me he'd keep us safe, he'd do anything if only I would come with him. But you know what I did? I pushed him away, I told him to leave. I told him that I didn't wanna see him again, not ever. And so he went away and I never saw him again. Your dad didn't find out about what happened between me and Manuel, until your seventeenth birthday...and believe me, Mindy, I'm sorry. It's just that...that my resentment crept all the way up that day." She fixed her eyes on me, "I didn't mean to ruin your life."

I merely nodded my head, "Did you love dad?"

"Yes," She answered.

"But not as much as you loved Manuel?"

"Yes." She said honestly.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, "Did you love me?"

She looked at me for a couple of seconds, "Your Manuel's daughter," She said, "Our daughter. How could I not love you?"

18

We've all lost something along the way.

An hour or so later, Paul and I were standing in front of this apartment in the Bronx. My father, Manuel's apartment. I couldn't even knock on the door.

"He might not even be alive," I muttered as Paul's hand was on my shoulder.

"Well, at least we came," He said, "I'll knock on the door for you."

I just nodded my head. Seconds later, a woman with her hair in shambles, opened the door. She was beautiful, only her face was smeared with grease. Paul and I looked at each other.

"I'm Miranda Larsen," I told her, "We're looking for Manuel Aspel—"

"Are you his daughter?"

I nodded my head.

"Come in," She said and led us inside the house.

"I'm Lyla," She introduced herself as she wiped her hands on her apron, "I'm Manuel's wife."

I couldn't say anything. There were two children, a boy and a girl respectively, whom I assumed were 8 and 10 playing a train set near us.

She smiled as she realized I was looking at them, "They're your siblings. Tyra's eight and Milo's ten."

"Oh," I smiled a little. "Where's—"

"He's dead," She told me, "He died two years ago. He waited for...for you but...you never came."

"I'm sorry," I said, "I didn't know. I was in rehab, and in New Orleans and...I didn't know."

"It's alright," She said. "He loved you, you know?"

"I wish I met him." I said earnestly. I couldn't even believe it.

"You still have your siblings." She smiled.

I smiled back, "Can I?" I said and she nodded her head. I made my way to the children and Indian-sat near Milo. "Hi," I smiled at them, "I'm Mindy, I'm your sister. Can I play with you?"

"Would...would you want to?" Milo asked.

"Of course," I answered and looked at Tyra, "And you?"

She smiled and I realized how much we looked alike when I was a kid, "I'd love to."

I smiled at them knowing finally, one chapter of my life has been cleared. Yes, Manuel maybe dead and I may not have met him, but at least, I still had my siblings. These two little kids who are, and always will be a part of me. And though I haven't been here for them all their lives, I know it's never too late for a start.

19

Once upon a time, in a galaxy not so different like our own, there was a girl. She was, by her own estimation, a relatively simple sort, yet she believed that she was cursed. Because, for as long as she could remember, boys had always been a disaster. They either fell too hard, too fast, or they didn't, at all. That's why she was so surprised to find herself in the company of a boy who made her feel as if the curse had been lifted.

-Dawson's Creek

Paul and I went down in front of Leigh's house.

"You wanna come in?" I asked.

"No, it's alright," He smiled.

"Thank you," I told him, "For everything."

"I love you." He said.

I was surprised, yet it all felt good. Like, it was supposed to happen anytime soon. I smiled, "I love you, too." I said.

He smiled and held my hand, "Listen, Minds, the people from the recording company called me up and they want me to start recording the first few songs for my album, in LA—"

"Oh my God, that's wonderful!" I exclaimed and hugged him, "I'm so happy for you!"

"I want you to come with me." He said.

"What? To LA?"

"Yes," He said, "Please? It's just for a couple of days..."

"Well..."

"Please?"

I smiled, "Of course I'd come with you." I said.

"Great," He smiled, "Do you want me to tell your family? Ask for permission or something?"

I laughed, "Well, in that case..." I trailed off then remembered something, "Oh, I remember, Leigh called me up last night, she wanted to have Sunday lunch with us, you know, at her and Neil's brand new house...Do you wanna go?"

"I'd love to go," He said, "Then we'll tell them about LA."

I smiled, "I love you." I said.

He kissed me, "I love you, too."

***

Neil and Leigh's house was beautiful—it was a mansion. Okay, maybe not really ultra big, but it was undoubtedly beautiful, and grand. Lots of tulips in the garden (you know they're expensive...), a large front gate, an antique Moroccan door, and a lovely living room will greet you as you walk in. Neil and Leigh, however, decided to make lunch a little more homey, and relaxed, so they decided to set up this picnic set at the backyard. I thought Paul and I were the last ones to come but surprisingly, mom still wasn't there. I introduced Paul to everyone and they all welcomed him warmly. Caroline hugged him.

"It's nice to finally see you in person," Caroline smiled, "I'm really sorry about the last time—"

"No worries," Paul said, "It's alright."

"So, you're the guy Mindy was with in Orleans that night she got wasted!" Leigh quipped.

"Oh, please, Alicia..." I muttered.

Paul laughed, "Yeah, yeah, that sure was me..."

"Paul's a good guy." Dad smiled.

"Wow, a nod of approval, eh?" Kim smiled.

I laughed and Dad held up a glass of water with a smile, as if proposing a toast. Just then, mom came to the backyard, alone. She was holding a big Gucci bag.

"Hey," Kim greeted and gave her a kiss.

"Where's Mister Stoner?" Caroline said with a wink.

"Enrique and I are over." Mom declared with finality. She gave me a little smile.

"Whoa," Leigh muttered, "Sorry 'bout that."

"Enrique doesn't deserve mom," I said and knew they were all surprised. Mom just smiled at me and this look of understanding came between us.

"So, Paul," Dad said, breaking the tension, "You're bringing our Mindy to LA?"

"Yeah," Paul answered, "Just for a few days, I'll just be recording some songs."

"My sister's going to Hollywood," Caroline quipped, "Wow."

"I-I'm s-sure Carol would want an autograph from M-mark Salling..." Robbie joked.

Everyone laughed.

"Oh, honey, you're the only one that I want," Caroline winked at Robbie.

"Geez, get a room!" I laughed.

"You and Paul should get a room, in LA..." Caroline smiled.

Paul smiled, "I'll take care of her, don't you guys worry."

"I know I can trust you," Dad said, "And you too, Miranda."

"Wow, thanks." I smiled cheerily.

"Eew, what has happened to this family?" Leigh quipped.

That's when we all cracked up.

20

"You gotta feel what you need to feel—even if it hurts."

-Sandy Cohen, "The OC"

Posh hotels, stars everywhere...that's what LA was. Paul and I were staying in a room at the famous Beverly Wilshire hotel and I even brought along some stuff for my painting. Paul was usually out, as he was in the recording studio. We were happy.

Paul went inside our room one evening after his recording session and greeted me with a hug.

"Hey, bella..." He smiled and kissed me.

"I missed you," I smiled, "How did it go?"

"Great," He said, "We can head back to New York tomorrow and come back here again when the producers say so. I'll be working with Rodney Jerkins on a track, can you believe it? Wow."

"You deserve it," I smiled.

He squeezed my hand, "Thank you," He said.

"Nah, thank you," I said, "You know what? I think I finally know what I can do to repay you for everything."

"Really, huh? What?"

"We should go to Florence."

He looked at me curiously, "Mindy, what?"

"We should go to Florence, visit Selina's grave—"

"Mindy, we don't have to do that."

"Look," I said as I held his hand, "You helped me clear up so many chapters of my life. You helped me with my mom, and dad, and with my real father, even though he turned out to be dead. Paul, I love you, and I know you love me, but I think the only way this would all be better is if we put an end to things that bother us. And you did that, for me. Now I just wanna do the same—"

"We're not going to Florence."

"Paul, denial won't help—"

"I am not in denial."

"Then why don't you wanna go to Florence?"

"Because we have no business there."

"Paul, you need some closure. You need to say goodbye to Selina."

"And who are you to tell me how to live my life?"

"I'm just concerned—"

"Hell yeah? Then stop with the Florence thing!"

I took a deep breath, "I let you help me with things in my life, I let you in my life, all I'm asking is for you to give me even just a little space in yours—"

"I don't wanna hear it."

"What is wrong with you?!"

"What is wrong with me?" He said, "What is wrong with you?! We're fine, you know? We're both fine, and now what are you doing?"

"I just wanna help—"

"You wanna help? Fine," He said, "Help yourself."

And he got out of our room without looking back.

21

"The time between meeting and finally leaving is sometimes called falling in love..."

-Lis aLoeb, "Falling in Love"

My feet were plopped up on the center table while I was holding a bowl of popcorn in one hand and a remote control in the other. I was watching the entire third season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians on DVD. I figured some other people's "Real" lives are better to watch than mine.

Paul didn't go back to our hotel room that night in LA and so I had to go back here in New York alone. It's been a few days and he hasn't sent me an e-mail, a text, a call...anything. Maybe it was over.

Okay, yes, yes, it does hurt. Why would I watch some reality show if I'm totally okay, right? But somehow, I wanna believe that it's really not the end of it all. That maybe, just maybe, he'd comeback.

Or well, maybe not.

I sound pathetic.

"Wow, a Kardashian marathon!" Caroline said as she went inside the house and sat down beside me. She placed down a grocery bag on the table.

"Why, you are here..."

"I'm sure misery loves company," She winked and nudged me, "You okay? I mean, I didn't know you were into the Kardashians..."

I laughed, "This is how we artists roll, sister."

She smiled, "I'm sorry for what happened."

"Oh, don't mind it, maybe he's just not ready to let go of her," I answered, "However, this Kardashian show is quite funny, don't you think?"

She smiled, "I love Khloe!"

"She's my favorite too!" I said, "Fierce, feisty...and crazy!"

She laughed, "Just like you..."

I took a deep breath, "I didn't really know love could hurt like this. It's insane."

"You'll be okay," She said, "Trust me."

I smiled. Just then, someone rang the doorbell.

"I'll get it," Caroline said and stood up.

I looked back after a few seconds when Caroline wasn't speaking and realized why.

Paul was there, just inches away from me.

I stood up, "Hey," I said.

"Hey..." He shot back.

"I think I shall leave you two alone," Caroline said, "I'll just be outside."

"Thanks, C!" I called out and took a deep breath as I looked at Paul. "So," I muttered, "You're here."

"Yeah, and I'm sorry," He said, "I shouldn't have left just like that. Actually, I shouldn't have left at all."

"You didn't have to come here—"

"I wanted to," He said, "I'm sorry, I've been an ass. I knew you just wanted to do the right thing and I over-reacted. Mindy, I'm sorry."

"I just want you to be happy," I said, "To recover...."

He then took something out of his jeans pocket. It was a small box. He opened it and out came a ring with a fairy on top. He knelt on the floor.

"Whoa, hey, Paul—"

"I already had everything when I had you," He said, "And I've been such a fool. I had the best, you know? You're the best and I'm an ass. And I'm sorry...please forgive me. I promise to make you the happiest girl on earth, to give you your strawberry fields, to search the world for fairies...to love you with every breath...Mindy, will you marry me?"

Epilogue

Poetry, beauty, romance, love...that's what we stay alive for.

-One Tree Hill

"Mindy?" Paul said, still kneeling down, "Say anything?"

I looked at him and thought long and hard about his question. I gazed into his eyes, took a deep breath and knew the answer.

"Mindy? Will you?"

"No," I answered, "Not yet, at least..." I smiled.

He stood up little by little, "No?"

"Not yet," I said, "Well, we might, one day, if you could wait..." I smiled and held his hands, "Look, Paul, I love you, you know that, but I don't think marriage is in the cards right now. However, if you may, I still want us to be together, but," I paused and went on, "we'll do things slowly, rightfully. We'd go to Florence, I'd help you start painting again, you'd help me with the shop..."

I saw a smile creeping up his face.

"...We'll be happy," I said, "Face it, we're not ready for marriage yet. And we have something so beautiful, so beautiful that it would be stupid to just make hasty decisions and throw it away like that."

He kissed me, "You're right," He said, "I guess, I was just wanting to make this right but I didn't really know how to."

"And now we have all the time in the world to make this world." I winked.

He laughed, "I like the way your mind works," He said, "So, what's the plan?"

What's the plan? Who knows, really? The possibilities are endless and this is only just the beginning.

I smiled and led him to the chair, "For now, let's just watch the Kardashians..."

He smiled back.

~♥~

