Hi beautiful people, Charisse here, your
online therapist.
This is a weekly roundup to just go
through the posts that i
posted this week why i did that and some
final thoughts just to bring it all
together
so i introduced you to what is anxiety
what is depression and what i wanted to
add to that is these two are often very
linked and they feed in and out of each
other
so the negative thinking of anxiety
is also linked to depressed mood so when
we're feeling low and we're feeling
depressed
obviously we're going to think negative
thoughts and then this can create a
degree of anxiety
and so these two things really can feed
into
each other and likewise when any of
those things are happening that will
also impact our relationships
conversely if we're struggling with our
relationships a little bit
that sure as hell is going to be
impacting our mood and we may begin to
be anxious or depressed as a result
so it was really important for me to
include all of this stuff
this is how i work with my clients it's
kind of we don't just talk about these
one things
i'll always be asking them about their
relationships about their lifestyle
about their mood
about their reactions to things because
this isn't about a condition
it's about us as humans this is how we
are
if if we are like this in one area we're
probably like this in all our areas
you know this is about our relationship
with the world and this is about our
relationship with ourselves
so um these things all are interlinked
and are often very very much
at play and that's also why i introduced
adult children into the mix um to go
along with the codependency which is
just such an awesome subject that we all
need to know more about
um these relationship things are crucial
and key
and then some of the things that happen
because of that like people pleasing
um or you know not taking time out to
look after ourselves
and all that kind of thing is really
really important
so one of the things that i focused on
this week as
a tool and something for us to try was
to say no if we are people pleasers can
we say no
i think some of us um had some success
at that i know i did
and then i also introduced this idea
which is going to be a massive idea and
kind of the theme
of the account in many ways which is how
can we begin
to go a little bit more slowly in our
lives
because if we were to look at everything
all of these subjects
and the dysfunction in those subjects or
the pain and the difficulty in those
subjects
for me a lot of them are maintained
through
speed we go too fast
we don't think we we don't give things
the time that it needs so i
really spoke this week about we need to
learn how to breathe
we need to take time to breathe
for me many years ago when i first heard
this i remember thinking
as if breathing is going to help with
anything
i'm dealing with i've got important
stuff to be tackling
um and we all now know of course that
meditating and breathing
are so crucial and so key and i would be
lost without it
so just beginning this idea of taking
time
out to breathe especially if we're
triggered another big thing that i'll be
exploring more next week but
especially if we're starting to get
upset if stuff is is is
being hard for us we have to
learn to take a step back and we have to
learn
to breathe and this then ties into what
i'm saying about
we as people have to start to go slower
this is what the world needs so much
right now
we are all running we're all
fighting we're all in survival mode
most of the time and if we're anxious or
depressed and have relationship issues
we are in survival mode we are
negotiating we're fighting we're
freezing we're
we're sort of negotiating sorting it's
kind of it's this relentlessness and
even if we're not really doing anything
it's still
endless and relentless up here it's
constant
and so we have to begin to slow down
we have to begin to slow down because
when we're in survival
we can't do the things that are going to
make us well
we can't stop and reflect
we can't take a moment to formulate
what we're trying to say we can't think
about
someone else and practice empathy
so these things are imperative in our
lives for us to lead fulfilling lives
for us to have the kind of relationships
that we're wanting to have
and this is the stuff of therapy you
know therapy helps us stop
it helps us reflect think things through
experiment with ideas make connections
realize where we're going wrong if we
don't take the time to do that
it's very then hard to remedy the things
that are tripping us up
so breathing saying no this is all about
making space
making space for ourselves our mental
health
relies on that so i brought all of these
things together this week i'm going to
be developing it every week
as you know keep sending me your
feedback thank you for your messages as
you know i read all of them they're so
important to me
and that then helps me know what to be
bringing next
but all these ideas adult children the
codependency
the strategies and tools anxiety
depression relationship stress
all of this is going to be developed on
every single week so
stick around for the ride we're just
going to learn more and more and more
and together we're definitely going to
be stronger
thanks and see you soon
