-Did you get your I.D. back?
I heard there was
identity theft.
-Oh, well, we're doing -- We did
a field piece on identify theft.
I didn't lose my I.D.
I lost my credit card.
-That's right.
-And the credit card company
do that thing
where they ring up,
and they go, "Have you given
your credit card to anyone?"
And I'm like, "Yeah,
everyone I buy something from.
[ Laughter ]
It's like,
"Protect your number."
They ring you up, "What's your
number?" "There's my number.
"What's the secret code
on the back?"
Oh, they'll never crack this
What?
I just give it. It's like
my Social Security number.
I give it out to --
I probably signed a contract
to be on this show.
"There's my number. Off you go."
You give it away. Off they go.
Anyway, but every now and again,
we got to travel around so much.
They do that thing where -
where they --
your credit card stops working
And they go, "Oh, your
credit card was being used
in Missouri."
And I'm like, "I'm in Missouri!"
"It was used to buy
a plane ticket in L.A.
And then it was in Missouri.
You bought a hotel."
I'm like, "That all tracks
That's meant to be happening."
Or they go, "You're in a casino,
and you're taking out
some cash."
What could I be
using it for, right?
[ Laughter ]
But every now and again --
Every now and again,
they ring you up,
and they go, "Did you do -
There was three transac--
There were two transaction
in Akron, Ohio."
They go, "Did you use your car
for two transactions
in Akron, Ohio?"
And I went, "No!"
And I go, "What were
the transactions?"
They go, "To get a car
out of the impound
and buy some baby formula.
And I went, "Ohh.
Uh, yeah, I did do those."
And I let them have the card
for two weeks
just till they got themselve
back on their feet.
I just let them -- [ Laughs
[ Audience "aww"s ]
And then they started
buying shoes.
And I went, "Ah, enough of that"
and got me card back.
-Just start buying
expensive things, yeah.
-Yeah, so, while they were
buying discount stuff,
I was -- "Alright.
Have a good time."
-They're buying flat --
[ Laughter ]
-About that, I want to --
"The Jim Jefferies Show"
is returning.
Anything new
that we can look forward to?
-Oh, well, it's the same thing
We're doing all these
international field pieces
-They're great.
-Each show,
we go around the world, and we
do -- We go around the world
and we do one field piece
in one city.
They actual way that's it's done
is that I just book a gig.
And then we find something
quirky about the town I'm in
to film during the day.
But I think the piece we'r
about to show is about how -
And this is going to happe
to you, America --
facial recognition.
And we're all going
to start getting scores.
Just like in China,
they're looking at your face
And then they're upping your
score like your Uber rating,
whether you're
acting good or not.
But it's not
for things being illegal.
It's like, drunk and disorderly,
you lose some things.
It's not illegal, is it?
Is drunk and disorderly illegal?
-No.
-Yeah.
-No, it's actually cool.
-Leave my score alone.
[ Laughter ]
-Exactly, yeah.
I want to show everyone a clip
Here's a look at a new episode
of "The Jim Jefferies Show."
Check it out.
-How accurate
is this technology?
Like, what if I had
an evil twin?
Could they murder someone?
I'd get blamed?
-You can't rule out
that possibility.
-What about, like,
plastic surgery?
-It won't match.
-Right. So, it wouldn't
have been able to tell
a young Michael Jackson
and an old Michael Jackson
-That would be like
two different faces.
-What would your algorithm say
just from my face?
-Oh, you look very angry.
-Have you ever heard the ter
"resting bitch face"?
-[ Speaking Mandarin Chinese ]
..."resting bitch face"?
[ Laughter ]
-He'd never heard that.
-No.
-Jim Jefferies, everybody!
