

Dedicated to my ever friend PAVAN.

I'd have penned your Story, if your breath was still in ambience.

## Acknowledgement

I would like to thank everyone who gave me the words of encouragement and the boost up in confidence needed to complete this book.

However I especially wish to thank, Saleem and Rohith for lending me their laptops when I needed it, Rushi Raja for letting me know what

I can really do with my Pen.

Shravani for encouraging me in every aspect, Shamili for reading each and every line I have ever written, as well as Sunny Sharath, Raju for constantly providing constructive critiques.

A girl named Jockey for breaking my heart and for being a good memory.

A very special thanks to Script Band "Hall of fame" song for injecting all needed inspiration into my veins.

My parents for giving me all basic necessities to write it and the Café which provided me a good place and Irani-Tea to refresh my mind when I needed it most.

May this book enlighten someone, somewhere.

## Deeds

Meeting her

Walk to the Love

Destiny threatens reality

Reality battles Destiny

Stepping into Reality

Dealing with Reality

Life continues

First Love

Meeting of Present and Past

Reality and Love

Reality threatens Love

Reflections of Past Love

Reality without Love

A Magic

##   
Prologue

It has been said that "love shall be a state of being" whilst others insist that "Love is blind." Coupled with these sayings are beliefs in destiny and for some only objective realities.

It is these beliefs that allow us to meet different kinds of people in our lives. Some make us believe that bad exists, whilst others make us believe that good exists. Throughout the dichotomy of good and bad, there is love. It is perhaps for this reason that opposites attract.

However even in the face of love, there are ambitions, aspirations and goals that may at times pose a challenge to our love, hence this story has been penned.

A guy; who believed in reality, which was me indeed. And the girl; who believed in Destiny, had meant something for our Love. What we did to make our love a gem in the shell is penned down in the words you will read below.

### Meeting her

Gazing over the setting sun, with the tinge of rays over the horizon, I observe a flock of birds in unison seemingly joyfully directed to their nests. At the other corner of my eye, the palm squirrel is scurrying for the hidden nuts. It's their unique nature, in fact a nature gift. I also see a herd of water buffaloes walking back to their cattle field post grazing. Whilst leaving the clean streets with the excreted dung on the road remains and the people do not seem to take offence. As a matter of fact, the dung is left until it is dried and then it slowly fades away by sticking to the running vehicle tyres and leaving the owner of the car or bike in sorrow, when he discovers the "dirt" on the mud guard is not dirt, but in fact the source of the foul smell that accompanied them to their final destination. My mind's eye digresses and I see a raft of ducks swimming around swiftly in the pond to my left corner.

It seemed to be a pleasant evening with young lads playing around. The cycle races were the

Sole fear to the aged pedestrians, who love to walk for some fresh air. In the midst of all around this, I walked down the aisle with my loud sounding flip flops, sporting a messed up hair style with some low too shorts. It felt damn good to feel my sweat being evaporated by the slow breezes from the branches around. While perusing the nature, something unusual caught the corner of my eyes. My ears became attuned to the sound of someone's anklets. "It must be girl for sure" my instincts told me. I willed myself not to turn around but I couldn't help turning my eyes to look at her through the corner of my eyes. I could not help myself, for the first time, my eyes were not listening to me.

As she approached I thought, "Oh god...Where are these models being manufactured and I shall know the value of them... so that they never miss the sight or glance off me again."

Not paying any attention to my fear of public ridicule and not withstanding my shabby appearance, I rushed toward her. However, at some point I halted in my tracks, thinking whom am I kidding..? I am not like the boys who walk around with strong perfumes plastered to the skin. However, I dared myself to show some guts to approach her just the way I am, after all I thought she might like me exactly as how I was presented.

When I reached her shadow, she started walking quickly no doubt she was thinking that some idiot is following her. But I am no fool, or perhaps I am having made the decision to approach her.

I started to raise my hands vociferously, of course my voice followed suit and both were stuttering without co-ordination. "What do I do?" I thought miserably, "Curse this weakness that boys do have for girls...!! Nothing can be done to it."

Refusing to be daunted by my awkward moment, I crossed over to her so quickly that she almost broke a leg by stopping so abruptly. In response, not surprisingly she screaming loudly covered her ears with her hands and shut her eyes tightly in fear. Her screams were so loud that I too was forced to cover my ears but I would not close my eyes. I could not let the sight of this master piece diminish from before me for even one second.

I don't know if she recognised that I was not going to hurt her, but she stopped screaming and you could hear a pin drop in the silence in the lane. At that moment, the sunset started and made her seem even more like a goddess. The twilight rays fell down from her beautiful hair to her forehead, to her eyelids until the rays caressed her lips, chin and neck. Of course my imagination ran wild and so did the embers in my manhood.

"Stop! Get reacquainted with your limits," said my brain. In that moment, she opened her eyes and I was the only one covering my ears with my hand. However, all this time I was thinking of what I could say to her.

"Why are you closing your ears?" She asked.

I said, "Weren't you shouting...?" and in so doing, I answered her question with a question of my own. This amused her obviously, because her lips broke out the most beautiful smile I had ever seen. Whilst her smile left me stunned, she circled me to assess me so slowly, that the smell of her skin caressed my nostrils as it lingered in the air.

I was so surprised at my instantaneous reaction to her that I started trying to make myself angry at her.

"Yea, I did believe in destiny in the past but not now" I said to myself.

If it's written that she passes by me in this manner, it would be foolishness, to keep standing in the same place dreaming of her, coming back again in the same path.

So, in that moment, I decided that I am going to connect my dots by walking over her again and again and make her pass by me again and again. "May the stars be around her and even the odds be so... I don't care because. I am not teasing her or even digging in a womb of lust. I was just following my instinct which was prodding me so badly to follow her at that moment.

I continued following her and I was damn sure that she knew that I am being her shadow. That thought, made me more robust in overtaking her again and introducing myself to her. I crossed over to her again and just stared slowly, mesmerized by her beauty. I presume that out of frustration, she turned around quickly to meet my face, but in so doing she hit her toe which caused her to trip. By a stroke of luck I caught her, I was never good at any sport requiring catching, in cricket I used to miss every catch that came my way. But not this time, the catch was perfect and could not resist brining her close to me in my arms. She was so shy, she refused to look at me for a while.

We heard some Bullet bike coming from the back lane making the beat sounds they usually do and she used the opportunity to pull herself together. She continued her walk again as if she did know nothing by keeping her eyes down. At first I was shocked, because I am sure she felt the chemistry between us too, but I got hold of myself, of course she would pretend as if nothing was happening, it's the culture of our country. But nothing in public ah..!!

For the rest of that whole day thought of nothing except her fragrance which was Nina Ricci and the skin tone of her... Its milk made softie which made me desperate to touch her at least for one moment. Her eyes were like the stars, I was able to see myself in her eyes clearly, her eye lashes were neatly groomed and her lips got the wetness of the river side. I have to admit, she swept me off my feet at that moment. Of course, I memorized her address. Because I understood that it's going to be my adda from the very next day.

I returned to home so embarrassed that almost every girl, every uncle and mainly every aunt saw me in such a worse costume ever. I didn't know these all when I was walking with her or following her. May be, it's something... Which every hero feels to her heroine. "I've got my heroine for my coming picture ahead" I thought.

My mom and dad with the newly arrived relatives; all were eagerly waiting for me. You could have seen the reactions of them while I was entering into the room.

ROFL.... I was laughing inside like hell. But I could read the expression of my dad's eyes and could hear the snapping sound of his teeth, warning me; "Nani... You're so dead tonight". So, I just ran away into my room.

By the way, Nani is my nick name. Only a few are familiar with it.

That night passed with a lot of dreams about her, making me eager in anticipation for the next day to come. As we never know the time in sleep, I felt like, if I close my eyes at night... it would be morning by the time, I open my eyes. That's it.

But it's hard to believe that a lonely and lost person knows the duration of darkness.

How many hours it is exactly...How many minutes it is exactly...How many seconds it is exactly...How long the stars are shining....!!

Only a lost one knows it all.

I didn't realise it but eventually, I drifted into a pleasant sleep, and the first rays never woke me up in the morning but there is my mom who slaps me on my back to wake up and go bring the milk packet. I always felt like my timing is the same as a cow or buffalo. But they are quite useful to the humans giving milk, and we are the consumers. The Lazy consumers, who hardly feed them even after pulling the milk.

I went to bring the milk packet in the same shorts, same messed up hair style and with the same flip flops again the shop was just in the back street. As, I was not allowed to climb the wall through my back yard I had to go walking around the block. A few of my friends would go for a jog at that time... striving for their fitness and some others to burn that burgered fat bought in the food street with a debit card swipe

When I reached the shop, I felt the same scent and my eyes itched to rub to have a clear glance. The same curves were in front of me showing the back to me. I was jumping with joy telling myself that it's my luckiest day ever. Early morning, we don't even show our face to god without taking a bath. But how come I've seen a goddess without even brushing my teeth. Kewl...!!

Breaking my statue position, I went and stood beside her, a little closer. Neither one of us looked at each other. But when she was taking the change from the shop keeper, a coin slipped from her fingers. And it directly got into my lousy open little pocket. I knew it but didn't take a chance of opening my mouth about the coin for fear I might stutter. Instead, I waited for her voice to come up with "Excuse me...!" But the shop keeper was shouting "Nani... It fell into your pocket. Giver it to her"

Oh... damn...!! I thought, and immediately we both faced to each other with insistence to the shopkeeper booming voice.

I was going crazy looking at her again that closely.

"Ohoo.... It's you again...!" she said in a low and tempting voice.

"Yea... I am. My parents named me as Srujan. I never knew the meaning anyway. What about you...?? " I said, whilst I extended by hand for her to shake it.

She ignored it, as the shop keeper was watching us vigorously. I thought I am going to be the hot topic in the colony in the coming days. I took my milk packet and started walking with her again. Good morning" I said.

"Not at all... and why are you in the same weird costume all the time...?" she asked.

I was expecting the same question thinking... "She must be thinking, I was roaming in the same dress since the past day."

"But it's the home wear." I said it with an innocent face. She left a cute smile reciprocating to my innocence. That was the moment; where I dared to ask her name.

"I would love to call you with a name. May I know what your parents named you..?"

In the meanwhile, a girl came on a scooty who looked similar to her. I thought, she must be her sibling. She hopped on the bike with ease; ignoring my question.

The scooty sped away and I was left looking down, hitting the stones with my slippers. And I gave a look asking her to answer me. As the bike started wheeling up the sand and making the dust gush into air. I was clearing it out with my hand wave in the air and here she turns.

And shouts "My dad calls me as Kinjal...!" Smiling out the words, she disappeared.

"Kinjal..." I was whispering and laughing so slowly that my heart only can listen to it. And it meant soulful, what I was feeling at that moment.

Walking back to the home... I was framing my name with her.

"Srujan Kinjal"

"Kinjal Srujan"

How sweet...!! I entered smiling into the opened door.

As you know, mom is the first person who sees your behaviour, no matter what!!She knows when you are hungry and when you are thirsty. That's what she is called to be Mother. None can replace her and her love. She got my attention. And I observed her looking at me in a cunning way. She must be thinking that "I am onto something mischievous for sure."

I got freshened up and went to college. By the way I was in my Bachelors 4th year in a class of "No-girls". This is called Mechanical Engineering in this so called advanced and modern educational society. In fact, there were only two girls in our class. There by resulting in a loathsome war between the male categories. Leaving all the headaches to us...but the attention made the girls were so happy.

By the end of our 4th year, our class boys came to know that fighting over girls is foolishness. There after we had good times spending some quality time together recognizing that investing time in each other could result in something meaningful in our lives.

Two days after my lucky meeting with Kinjal, I went to visit home as my college was just 60km away from my home. I used to go back to home like a greasy factory worker. Finally, I got down from bus in the stop 3km away from my home. And a few of my friends threw a casual "hi and bye" to me in when I was near to reaching the car stand. From there I usually take a share auto or sometimes walk while having a chat with some friend or some neighbourhood.

But that evening, it was raining cats and dogs, so there was no car in sight so I gave up on the hope of getting a car and decided to walk home from the bus depot. Of course, I got totally soaked. As I was entering into the colony, I saw a scooty giving a girl trouble in the pouring rain. I couldn't recognize who it is in the first glance. But when my vision became, I discovered she is the girl whom I saw with Kinjal a few days ago near milk shop. "Hey. It's you ah..? What is the problem?" I asked.

"It's not getting started. I don't know might be due to rain water. It often happens." She concluded with a sigh.

"Oh... It's not safe to stop here though, buses take a fast turn where they can never stop in speed. Let's park it aside. I'll walk you home. Come on." I said.

"Then what about bike?" She asked.

"You girls na..!" I said with a nasty look.

"Oh... come on. Even Kinjal doesn't want to leave it here. She just went to home seeking dad help. Even our mobiles got switched off." She said.

"Really... then let's wait here only." I said unable to stop myself from smiling.

"You like her. Don't you..?" She asked as I kept smiling, and at the same time Kinjal came running to us.

"What happen? Where is dad?" Her sister asked.

"Wait... BTW what is your name?" I asked facing sister of Kinjal with a doubtful look on my face.

"Bhavya" She said.

"Yay... Good name ah..!" I replied

"Thank you bro." She said.

"Oh..! Wait you two... Dad is ill. So I couldn't ask him. I am sorry to say, but we have to push it to home" Kinjal said.

"Push..? It's 2km nearly. I can never do it with this energy." Bhavya just got leaned to the pole back to her in a weak mode.

"Me neither." Kinjal said.

"Then who will?" I asked.

Bhavya and Kinjal gave a head turn to me and I got a clear vision of myself dragging the Honda Activa over that steep.

"I never thought I would push a bike to a girl home keeping them beside me enjoying in rain water" I said.

After struggling to drag on the steep, there came a small slope.

"I got an idea" I said.

"Me too" said Bhavya.

"Wait. It's not what I am thinking right now. Na..!" Kinjal said looking doubted.

"Yes. It is. We will get on bike and go on a flow in slope along with running water. In the middle there is a flood of water. There is the real thrill. It will be awesome. Come on... Get on..!" I said in excited mode.

"Yay..! I am in." Bhavya said.

Kinjal is stumbling here and there, but she decided that she is not coming with us.

"Sissy... Come on. We did it with our bicycles in our childhood. Don't you remember?" said Bhavya facing Kinjal. In-fact she requested Kinjal playing her chin.

"Damn... You both are really mad and I'll kill you if we skid or fall into water at any cause" said Kinjal.

"Yay... It's an acceptance. Come on Bhavya and Kinjal. Let's go for a thrilling ride." I said.

"Huy... Game is on." She said.

Bhavya was very enthusiastic while Kinjal was in utter fear of skidding in the rain which often happens.

As I got on the bike, Bhavya was telling me; "Srujan... Let's stop in that still water in a dramatic scene."

I got the plan and I agreed. Kinjal got on the bike sitting back to Bhavya. That's it. I released the brake from my fingers. To my great surprise, we gained a speed of 30km/hour at ease with the slope gain to tyres.

As the still water kissed the front tyre and then the mudguard resistance made the water come out splashing out in two ways with speed leaving an enchanting smile on our faces. I and Bhavya were shouting aloud "Yahoooo..." where Kinjal joined us on the verge.

Bhavya pinched me on my hip reminding me to stop the bike. Ha Ha...! I couldn't control my laugh and you know... I did it.

I stopped it slowly while saying.

"Hayoo hayoo... It's getting slow. Come on come on. Let's move it forward by swinging front and back."

Bhavya was laughing while doing it and was yelling at Kinjal to join us in doing so.

How hard we did it. We couldn't make it out of the still water on road. Finally wheels got remained still in still water. I just said. We are done girls. Let's get wet. Bhavya was literally laughing from the gut. I felt her stomach movement as she is leaned to me so tight. I got down and water was almost kissing my knees. Bhavya also got down from front following me as it was a scooty. But Kinjal was sitting there only to the end catching hold of the rear rod.

"Sissy... come on get down. It's fun." Bhavya said.

"Shut up. It's not. I'll not." Said Kinjal.

"She loves that jeans." Said Bhavya slowly into my ears.

I was dragging the bike with Kinjal on the seat hardly making it through the still water with strong legs.

"Loose the balance... Loose the balance... Loose the balance..!" Bhavya was murmuring these words very slowly that I hardly heard it.

I dared so, I just did it shouting... "Kinjal Kinjal... It's slipping... its slipping."

As Kinjal was folding her legs almost up the pedal, she couldn't control or take support with her foot. That's it. She fell into the water as a free ball.

Bhavya started the engine of laugh and following her I started laughing too because couldn't control it. We were laughing so hard, we had to catch hold of our stomachs and Kinjal stood up in anger and running after us to hit us. For our bad luck, she got hold of a stick from somewhere but it ended as fun. Finally we dragged the bike out of water and reached their home with water drops slipping from our clothes and I parked it inside.

"Thank you Srujan..! For the help and a memory" Said Kinjal.

"Anytime." I replied and smiled at her, I gave a warm hug to Bhavya saying "never lose the spirit you have dear".

"I'll not. And don't lose the heart you have." said Bhavya.

I left her and closed gate with a smile on my face and I kept turning back to see if Kinjal was looking at me, but I couldn't tell it was dark up there.

"She might" said my heart.

.......................................................

Four days later, on my usual return home for once I was actually not thinking about Kinjal, but out of nowhere I heard someone calling, "Kinjal!" My whole body got so attuned to the voice calling her name, I ran to that building trying to find out where the voice was coming from. It was a middle aged woman calling it over and over again. In response a gate opened letting out somebody. I waited anxiously to see if it was her. But to be great chagrin, a little girl came walking out of the gate with an empty basket in hand. But she was so adorable, I couldn't help but smile back at her because she was very cute.

I left the street and began to walk down to my home which was a few houses above. Out of nowhere, a scooty stops in front of me asking me to get on. It was her.... Kinjal.....???? I doubted at first, but of course I am also surprised. Indeed her face was hidden in the scarf.

"Hi. Where are you going?" She asked.

"Hey, just heading home dear. What about you?" I asked.

"Somewhere pleasant, where I go often when I feel confused, happy or sad." She said.

"Oh... I don't know in which mood you are now. But do you mind if I join you?" I asked in desperation.

"Mmm...No" She said.

That instant, the colour went from my face, leaving tungsten eyelids down hanging loose in air. The disappointment I felt was very obvious. She was still in front while I looking towards her heel. As she was moving to leave, I said, "Hey wait, whatever the mood might be it is, hope it turns to happiness when I am with you." I could see her expression change, which signalled that her answer was now yes, so I asked, "Think I can get on now?"

She actually laughed and said, "No questions get on or I'll go on."

"Damn... Thanks a lot. I won't." I replied in relief and I thought to myself, "If you're with me... I don't even want to know where I am sailing to, any Island is a heaven for me when it is with you." But I didn't actually tell her because I didn't want to scare her off, so keeping my mouth shut I just got on the bike. The route she took actually went past by house, but as I was sitting so close to her, my mind was wrapped up in the thought of her and nothing else.

Many must have seen me going on a girl scooty, but she was safe as she was covered with the Indian girls' safest weapon, the scarf, so I had nothing to worry about. However somewhere in the back of my mind I thought, if my mother sees me I'll be damned! But I brought my mind back to the present and noticed that she was driving out to the other colony which is connected to ours. There is a temple in the east corner of our colony, which is located on a small hill, she stopped the scooty there and I had to lay my hands on her shoulders to get down, I was hoping that this would not make her feel uncomfortable, but she actually did not respond.

I got down and she was trying to remove her scarf painstakingly, but in vain. She turned her back again to me asking me to untie it. I was speechless. I thought, there is lot more to learn from the silence of a girl. I untied the scarf slowly and she turned back to me in an equally slow motion. Looking into her eyes, I felt like I was seeing a beautiful full moon through her eyes and at the same time, she herself shone in the moonlight like a golden jewel. Her eyelashes were batting quickly, I could tell she felt the tension between us.

"Kinjal...." I said murmuring.

"Ha.... Srujan" She replied

"Why are you this beautiful..?" I murmured again.

She smiled and blushed, and I summoned the courage to take her hand and she turned and we walked to the temple. I could see clearly that she was happy, a total change in her mood when I first went on her scooty not too long ago. I could also feel the chemistry between us, I know right there and then that I felt something for this girl and I only wished that she would give us the chance to explore it, because I knew she felt something too.

As we got to the main door of the temple, I could see a lake which mirrored the moon and the dense bushes around it. All this time, I held on to her hand, but I could not help but ask, "Why are we here?"

She responded by asking me, "why are you here?" This took me by surprise, so I stammered, "Because, I...!" She smiles and says, "You....?"

I took a step forward to gather my thoughts because I knew she would think I was the dumbest guy on earth if I fell speechless after asking her to accompany her to wherever she was going. So I told her, that I am just a I am a normal guy with the average life, living for my parents even though, unsure of what I want for myself, and that I am only here because of her.

She was all ears to me and so I took the opportunity to ask, "what about you?"

"Me...?? What should I really tell you now if anything at all..?" she replies.

"Yep. Go ahead. Now, I am all ears." I replied.

She tell me that she was born and bought up in Gujarat. Her dad got transferred to Hyderabad 3years ago. He works in an MNC company. I think of myself as a free soul, but this is only a feeling because in reality this is not so. I am bonded in a cage of strict people, she tell me, but the presence of love is always there in each breath around our walls and that is what sustains me. And after saying that, she held my hand tighter. At that moment, I realised that I had fallen for her the first day I met her, but how could I tell her that? The last thing I wanted to do was scare her off. I have seen many friends get slapped for moving too quickly and I didn"t want to take a slap from her at any cost. I decided not be over smart.

As she was so open with me, I decided to tell her about my past so I said; "I had a girlfriend in my teens, but it ended up as every teen love story itself. It took me two years roughly to get over it. And now here I am standing beside you, being held in your hands." This made her blush, and I felt the urge to know more about her. It is as if she felt the same feeling at the same time that I did because she said, "I want to know more about you".

It was a jaw drop moment for me because I did not expect that from her, but of course I regained my composure and said, "For sure...in the coming days."

"Smart ah..!" she said.

"How long will you hold this hand?" I asked boldly.

"How long can you be held?" She asked reciprocating to me.

Smiling at her I said, "May be for a month, may be for a year, may be for a couple of years, may be for a life time."

"I loved the last option. But if any of the first three options ever happen, I will kill you for sure. I will end myself too." She said.

"You're a bit bossy, did you ever know that..?" I said.

"Yea, that's one of my negative angles. Good to hear from you. Better mind it." She said.

I didn't know whether I should take her words as a proposal or proposal acceptance or warning. But I sensed a lot of love in it but that made me a bit wary, because nothing came easy in my life. If it did, it never lasted and I went into a bit of thought for a while. Not realising that my mind was drifting from her, she snapped with her fingers in front of my eyes asking me to come into this world from the interpretation of dreams. I looked at her and before I could stop myself, I said,

"Kinjal I am in so love with you dear. No girl, stood beside me for such a long time by holding my fingers. Every girl used to ask me, to take to shopping or for a movie or pub or some fun filled lustful themes. But you are someone who led me to a temple and asked me to hold this hand for a coming life. The moment I saw you on that day, I've fallen for you. No matter what you think, I have to speak to you. That's all I had in my mind. You are the one who made me know who I am."

Tightening my hand, she looked right at me and I can see how hard she is trying to stop the tears. But the thing with tears is that they have to come out when they have to,

"Why is it raining in your eyes?" I questioned leaving a smile smoothly drawing her closer to me. "I don't know" and I pull her close to me holding her tightly in my arms and with that my thoughts were going in a wayward direction, "It is temple right...?" I murmured in her ear.

She realized and so dragged me to the inner side of the temple, she positioned herself like she was going to pray, so I said to her, "I don't know what to do in a temple. I have been reading the Holy Bible since my child hood. We go to church every Sunday, but that's about it." She looked at me, urging me to pray by joining my hands together. I didn't know what mantra to spell, but I just held my both hands together and closed my eyes and silently prayed "God, I visited the temple many times since my childhood. But I never asked anything as per my concern. This is the prime one, Please give

whatever she is praying for. Thank you."

I unfolded my hands and when opened my eyes I saw her standing in front of me.

She was smiling and eagerly asked me "what I have prayed for?" At the same time, the priest came with the plate in his hand. He gave us the "harathi" to take the vow and placed the **shathagopuramon** both of our heads in line, "Blessing us to be a couple for the rest of eternity." We both looked at each other and smiled with a smile that reached our very eyes.

Although we climbed the temple stairs to go up very quickly, it took us nearly half an hour to get back to the scooty.

"Kinjal ..!" I said. "Ha..!" she turned to me.

I didn't know what to say, so I said, "Oh... what is the meaning of your name "Kinjal "..?"

"Mmm... You're the first one who asked me this question. Fortunately I was prepared for this question. Its "Sweet water" or "River bank" But I like the first one." She said.

"Me too." I said.

"When shall we meet again?" I asked.

"Let us see. Destiny is what I believe in. It should make us meet. And when you feel to meet me... Just go out for a walk. When I feel to meet you, I will come out. If at all it's in the even time. We shall meet or else, it's a sign that we are not meant to be." With that she left with a smile.

That smile has many meanings, I thought.

I watched her drive down the lane, she was so cautious I saw her laying the break, even in the absence of speed breakers so many times it made me chuckle. I was hoping she would stop, but she just continued slowly and in walked back all the while whispering her name in my mouth. By the time I got home, it was almost 9 pm and everyone was waiting for me to join them, but I couldn't eat and I insisted I was full and didn't have even a glass of water.

By the time I reached home it was 9pm almost. All of them were waiting for me to join the dinner with them. But I insisted. As I was stomach full. I didn't even feel to have a glass of water.

By the time I went to lay down in bed, I was mad at her and confused by her, I spent the whole night thinking, what should I do, how can I make this relationship progress? I contemplated the things that people usually do and decided that playing games was not the way to go, or else we would end up like every other couple that broke up. I considered the roots of relationships, the positives and the negatives and I decided to write them down in my personal diary, because that is what we do as writers. I even blog frequently because I just love to write, no matter what the subject matter is, at times, even the poetry comes from a broken heart and soul.

This is when I got a brilliant idea, I would write her a love letter and because she set destiny as our scheduler, I knew I would have to do it quickly and in a manner that was well timed. I was so nervous, my first five attempts were terrible but I kept trying even though nothing seemed to be good enough.

Then it occurred to me that,

You cannot write when you want to,  
It usually happens when you feel to.

With that I lay the pen down and rested my head right there on my desk.

My mom scoldings were my alarm for the day. She was always a wonderful mother, raising her children to be a useful citizens, teaching the facts of life in all the means of human. Since my childhood, I remember so well almost every deed. Whenever I fell on the road or come to my home with a rash on my skin or any fresh wound on flesh Na... I would get my ass beaten like anything. She used to beat us, constantly harping to us that to keep our eyes on road, never to be careless in our lives. Later she used to cry by sitting beside us by caressing our hair, after we fell asleep. As we would know that she would do so, we loved her more and more from the start. Here I am referring **'we'** as me and my sister. Her name is Shamili.

Finally, as I got up. My mom came rushing to me asking, "Is anything wrong in your bedroom? Did you do anything to the bed sheets?" She loves the utensils, clothes, bed sheets and curtains. If anything is done to them in any means Na..! She would reverse the broom stick. Which is the greatest weapon for mothers in 90"s especially. I told her that everything was fine, I just fell asleep writing something.

She picked up the crushed papers her with hands and asked me, "why did you crumple the papers, what did u write in them..??

For a moment, I panicked but quickly told her, it's the answer sheet. Thankfully, it seems she was satisfied with my answer and she resisted opening them. I thanked my lucky stars for that, because in this situation, you can be caught by your dad but never to a mother. Whatever it is...!! Remember this.

Once I took a bath, my perspective of my looks had a drastic change. I felt to be more stylish. Because the way you dress can determine the level of respect you get, "you get the respect in return to the way you get dressed." It was one of the wise words I heard from my grandfather. So I got my shirt tucked in, added a little gel to my wet hair, deodorant and combed my eyebrows. I didn't realise my mom was watching me all this time and as I turned back... she was there staring at me. She asked me "To where is the modified horse going even on a Sunday?"

Damn...I forgot that it was Sunday.

To cover myself, I said I was going for a movie.

"Go for church and pray so that your sins be cleansed." She hesitated and left to go to the kitchen.

Now I was in need of money. Convincing a mother to get the bucks you need is tough but not impossible. It applies only for boys, girls do obviously take it on fathers' weakness. My sister was watching me with cunning look that said "How did you get the money you wanted from mom?"

I grinned with a look that said, "Well, I got it" Beating my hand in the air bending down in front of my sister. She was so jealous. Ha Ha..!! I laughed and went out.

I don't know where I was going and there was no bike so I stood at the bus stop with nothing in mind, not very long after standing there, I saw a bike coming and it turned out to be one of my friends. I stopped him and asked him to borrow the bike so I could go by her lane and I intended to honk until she came out. I wasn't going to wait on destiny, I remembered what she said the previous night, but I believed that you reality is what you made it and if it wasn't going the way you want it to, then you have to take steps to make it so. I refused to be one of those people who cried, get depressed and then commit suicide, that's not the life I envisaged for myself.

As I drove by her lane blowing the horn, she came out in a pale blue night gown obviously surprised, but she tried to pretend like she was keeping it cool. She signalled that I should wait in the park in the colony next to ours and she would be there shortly. I asked her why I could not just come straight to her house.

"What if I ask you the same question?" She shouted. I kept calm and gave her the thumps up sign and head to the park.

#

# Walk to the Love

I was sitting right in front of the pond in the park watching the ducks swim, fishes drew near to the shore in search of some food and pigeons were flying away from tree to tree settling for the shelter which is much needed in a hot noon. It was 1o"clock, I think. After a while, I sat down in the garden down to the tree shadow. It was cool and pleasant for a complicated person like me.

The environment made me to forget the time in which I am waiting for my love. I forgot that I had a watch on my wrist as I was lying on the grass by keeping my wrist down to my head. I saw a paper made toy aero plane flying on top of me. I ignored it thinking it as some kid play. When it flew in the second time, I felt that it would be her. I felt a light kick in the stomach by her, which made me sit straight in front of her as she settled down in-front of me. I smiled whilst looking at her, I could tell she was a little nervous but she was trying to hide it you could see the sweat on her neck. I asked her to come and settle down in front of me and she did so.

"Kinju.... "What happened? Why are you nervous?" I was caressing her hair and writing something on her spine and felt her clothes were so wet with the sweat underneath. Her response was a little different, so I turned her toward me and when I did, she was all in tears.

"What happened?" I asked utterly confused.

"She grinned widely, did you think it was real, I was just kidding. I am sweating because I came walking in the hot sun as my vehicle is not working." She kept on laughing leaving me in a silent shock.

"Don't you kid with me in such a way...! I thought something terribly bad happened to you." I replied.

"Oh... you're in so love with me ah...!" She plays my chin.

I just felt to lay my head in her lap. Without any permission, I did so. I could tell that she felt so happy, she kept on caressing my hair with her fingers. I can see her eye lashes blinking very low. Her lips were moving up and down and with the tongue making wet. But I asked...

"Can you make my lips wet?"

"If you can make my eyes wet, why can't I make your lips wet..?" She replied by bending down her head to me. She was in me by playing with my lips. Her fingers are under my head holding the hair tighter. And caressing my right ear with her tongue was cutting my nerves down to her. I can feel her warm breath mixed with my one. Her Exhale was my inhale and my exhale was her inhale. This is what a clear respiration means I thought to my mind.

Unlike every other girl, she didn't close her eyes. They were wide open watching my eyes. I was only observing the eye ball movements. We were so damn fully in love. What more can I say...?? She swept me off my feet.

Losing my hair, she fell on to the grass in the same way, still keeping my head on her hip. "You know...It's my first kiss and I loved it." She said. I was smiling as she and I knew it's not my first one. But she is different and I felt it.

"Yay..! Shall I kiss you again? You taste damn good." I said.

He... he..! Not now. And come up Srujan.

I crawled back to her face. We just lied down to the tree. And by making the signs in the air, we made the sky our board. I told her some I wrote, which made her impressed. I always thought "A writer can only impress a reader but not a girl." I thought only a great poet like Pablo Neruda and William Shakespeare made it happen in the real world. I never wanted to be them or like them. I wanted to be myself. I wanted people to know my own name and my work.

She asked me to hear some more poetry penned by me and was curious to know how I felt when I was with her. She wanted to hear it in poetry "When I am with you..?" I asked her.

"Yep, I'd love to hear it." She replied smiling and asked me to hear it.

# When I'm with you....

My;

Eyes follow your moves.

Eye lids freeze out.

Cheek bone warms up.

Ears are keen at your vice.

Nose sniffs your body scent.

Throat hardly remembers thirst.

Lips always get wet.

Tongue spells your name as numerous.

Hands move in air finding a chance to touch you.

Shoulder has quite attraction towards yours. Foot taps to feel your legs in response.  
Fingers scribble to touch your hair.

Palms struggle to lock in yours.

Skin suffers from Goosebumps.

Head wants to relax in your laps.

Body wants you to hear my heart beat.

Heart jumps with joy every millisecond.

My soul alarms me to keep you safe in my heart.

When I'm with you...

I am just with you, Kinjal.

She was amazed and was blushing while listening to me. Her outlook is that she never wants to know how much I loved her, because she felt that if you knew everything at once, life could get boring. But I felt she should know how I felt at that moment, after all who knows how long we have to live anyway? We don't know whether we will be alive for the very next morning, but we set the Alarm and go to bed. Pity us humans I thought.

After listening to me, she made me promise her that I would never stop writing, then she asked,

"By the way, what do you do?"

"I am in 3rd year of my Bachelors in Mechanical

Engineering." I replied

"Ooh..! Kewl. I am in my 3d year but it's Dental in Malla Reddy Medical College." She said. "Girls must be damn good in your college" I said.

"Yes, I'm indeed" she replied, in a matter of fact kind of way.

I was folding my lips by closing my eyes and looking at the sky, so she came near to me to play with my chin and told me to stop being naughty. This caused me to grin at her and show my teeth to request a dental check-up. She laughed but closed my mouth with her hands and said with a wink, "not now but in private for sure."

Later on, it was almost 4"O clock in the evening. We were gossiping about something, and one of my friends was passing in that way snooping. I ignored him at first. But watching him pass by us, trying to snoop made me angry.

Out of my temper, I stood up and yelled by his name.

"Sanjay..! Sanjay..!"

He turns around and replies "What?"

"What... what? Why are you roaming here and there... looking at us? Is there any problem?" "Nothing, I was just walking. I do it daily in this time to reduce my fat." He replies and goes on his way in the same way.

Weird idiot, I thought and returned back to my girl.

"Who is he?" Kinjal asks me in fear. "Don't be concerned about him." He is an old friend of mine.

"No. I saw him roaming in my lane many times. Whenever I saw him, he was always on a walk." She replied.

"Isn't he following you?" "Ha...!" I asked in confused state. "How would I know?" She replies.

"Ha... Better, forget him. Where were we in the world of romance?" She kept blushing and those dimples on her cheeks were gaining my attention. I kept my finger in one of her dimple and said it's beautiful.

She made my finger go deeper by smiling more. I asked her, "how come you girls get these dimples?"

"How come you boys get beard?" She reciprocates in a satiric way.

"Genes may be the reason" she said doubtfully

"Aha...!! Cool, I always wanted to have them, as girls do love boys with dimples" I said.

Na...!! She resisted it.

One has to be manly. With a rugged look, I love it that way. She claimed, so I was indeed proud with a rugged look for that day.

She laid her hands on me crushing my head down with love and walked the garden and playing for a while. I was tickling her hips, which was the best way cause her to let her guard down.

Every woman has a weak point. A guy should know it well and clear. You got to be presuming every deed of her at prime. So that you would never face the problem of standing by directing the floor or shoes and hear her screaming out something which you never wanted to.

From then on we had a completely different life.

My timings changed. Every morning I began to wake up on my own without any indulgence of my mom, running to the milk shop for an early morning darshanam of my angel.

Sometimes she wouldn't come to the shop. I would go walking in her lane, and many times I've got seen by her dad who was always walking in the veranda, at that timing for my ugly coincidence.

Whenever I complain about her dad seeing me na... Kinjal would react so smoothly and Say "Chodnayaar...!! Kya bigda abhi..?" with a vulgar angle in her.

I used to speak many vulgar words.

In the past days, whenever I felt a sudden pain or fell down or something happens terribly to my body which causes instant pain na... the prime word which comes from mouth was "Amma...!" (Mother in Telugu)

Some times as "Oh God..!"

But now, whatever the cause may be.... If I fall down or my skin gets sensed to any burn or any shit thing..!

"F***....!" It would be the prime word from my mouth.

It's happening in our country. Yes, we are changing. The probability of getting laid is greater than being loved. After all we are in a Democratic country.

From then on we sat back in a bush... hiding ourselves to get wet and reduce our stress. The only place which lovers or couples opt for romance in India mainly. You can hardly find a bush space empty in a park. Mainly during evening time, they are un-stoppable.

Some guys or media people arrange some secret cameras to expose the secrets of bushes. Some get succeed and some get caught. It often happens.

As we were sitting under the bush, we felt quite comfortable. We were not even touching our hands. We sat linear, playing with our legs. A watchman came and

Bowed his head down in to us and said; "Bow...!" As if he is playing hide and seek with kids.

"F***... what do you want?" I asked with anger.

"What do you expect what I want?" He asked. I know he came for the money. One has to bribe him else he does what he does. Rubbish thing for which girls do fear and be aware of. Because most of the girls in the park are damn concerned about their social safety and on other hand they need their things to be done under the bushes. "Crazy bushes...!" I thought.

Without insisting, I put my hand in my pocket. Shit... I forgot my purse.

"Purse poindha thammi...?" (You lost your purse ah Brother...!) He left a counter in a boom voice in Telangana Telugu slang.

Telangana is a newly emerged state in India (i.e., where I was born & Live) and the slang of Telugu language here is pretty unique and people love to imitate the language in fun.

Helping me out with it... Kinjal took the money from her purse and gave it to him addressing him as "Anna...!" (Brother in Telugu)

"Thanks chellamma (Sister in Telugu). Teach him how to satisfy..!" He left leaving a double meaning dialogue to our ears.

"Ugh.... I know that idiot. He used to be our watchman in our schoolings. They fired him for his drunken behaviour in school timings." I said.

She felt relieved and tried to rest on my chest. I gave her more space by cuddling firmly.

"Nani... what are you going to do if someone comes and tries to molest me?"

"Is it a question to ask in such a romantic position?" I countered.

She gave a look at me with her lower lip out.

"Oh honey...!! Why would I let that happen...? First of all, why I would I leave you from my arms. I always wanted you to be here listening to my heartbeat. They say that heart beat speaks. But I never felt so. Do you believe in it..?" I asked with doubted face.

She sat on her knees and took my head towards her chest. Laying my head on her heart so that I could listen to her heartbeat. It was beating at a high pace and of course I felt the softness.

"Honey, why is it beating so ghastly?" I asked being in the same position.

"When I am with you, I too feel the same way as you do. You express it by writing and I don't. But still, I feel in sync with you." She took me up and placed a kiss on my forehead. She must have caught a whiff of my shampoo because she asked, "what shampoo do you use idiot?"

I said "clinic plus" laughing out in desperation and showing my teeth.

"But it's a girl shampoo, right..?" Yea, it is my moms. I said.

"Shee shee... no shame at all." She teased by beating on her mouth with her lined four fingers.

My mom used to rinse my hair by using soap nuts. If I cry, she would kick my ass for no doubt. But it's hard to not let the foam water from entering into eyes. If they entered in some way, one has to cry with itch and pain.

Didn't you ever use them?

"I am a Gujarati girl. Why wouldn't I? I've used them till my teens, but no more ah..!!

"Kewl... Lucky girl." I said.

"How is your mother in nature?" She asked for the first time about my family which I never did. I could only tell her that she will know her only when she actually gets to know her. As every Indian mother, she always tends to select a girl of her choice to me. Which indeed is a tradition that came from her parents, as they did the same to her at a very early age. She got married at the age of 19years. When compared to us, we were done with our high school exactly by that age. She had taught us good things, some even in a bad way. But we got the difference in both ways. That's if we take in a positive way.

On the negative side, she is mad on dowry like every mother. She has a plan to take it from her coming daughter-in-law i.e.., you, but I am against the dowry tradition. If at all the girl really has something, her parents should be allowed to keep it, because, even they are getting older in age.

What about you, "what is your opinion about dowry?"

"The girl has to go with some gold and money with her, so that she shall have some respect in all the ways. If she comes empty handed being in a middle class family, at some or other juncture, she has to bear that word of coming empty handed to the new home. No girl wants to hear it." She gave her opinion.

Based on her response, I knew that she was more of a realist than a believer in destiny, even if she was not ready to admit it.

"Unless we keep on trying for what we need, we don't get it." That's what I heard more and more times from my teachers in school. It just got rooted into my brain. It shall be between me and Kinjal though, I thought.

That day ended up as dusk, leaving us in the nature womb. We still held hands when leaving, although usually, my hand finds its way around her neck or hip and she always puts she own hand around my hips.

###

### Destiny threatens Reality

"If something has come to you and you accept it with all your heart. Then, think its destiny." She said that this was the wise word which came from her mother's heart ever and the only remembered one so far. I had no answer in response.

When I came to know about her strong will and belief in her theory on destiny, I was astonished and I thought, if she is fixed on to something,

She will never draw back. No matter what...!"

For many days I forgot the world. As she was the vision and mission I had, all the time. The good thing is that she felt the same. Every minute and every second updates would be exchanged. We do have our Facebook accounts and Gmail accounts. But we never had our passwords exchanged as most of the lovers did. In-fact, we never got the chance for it. Not even a thought of it. I always wondered why lovers keep exchanging the passwords of social media accounts which they own. After break up, the party doesn't end. They do fight again for the passwords. Crazy... I thought.

Kinjal.... A smiling face, a kind heart, but a blind vision, wisdom on reality is all she lacked in. Whatever I did to her, whatever I spoke to her, whatever I gave to her, whatever I wrote to her, whatever I left to her, she received all of them, as the gifts of destiny. Whenever, there was a problem, I sought her help. It used be our problem at the end of the day. She did everything I asked for. There by, naming and blaming it as the act of destiny. She took all the positivity out of my negativity. Thinking it as the role given to her, by the destiny in changing me... over to this world again. I would go by her side time and time again. Yet, I always thought that she lacks wisdom because of her strong belief in destiny. But sometimes I think I was wrong. I don't know.

In the early morning hours, I've dreamt of having a break up with Kinjal, it was a nightmare, I couldn't bear it for a second, even in the dream it severely pained by heart. I got up in fear, shock, heart racing and sweating all over. Knowing Kinjal, if a quarrel came in between us and one of us said "Let's break up" she would do it, taking it as an act of destiny. It got me thinking, what if her father blackmails her in an emotional way to marry another guy, would she give into it as an act of destiny? I couldn't bear these raising questions in my mind with the rising sun on that pleasant morning... Not even for a millisecond. I had to change her, I had to bring her to the reality show her real examples that she could not deny so that she could see the flaw in her theory.

#

# Reality battles Destiny

I texted her, to meet me in the Golconda Fort the last time we met was two weeks prior by the time I reached the Fort, she was waiting for me. She was in jeans with a scarf covering her face with shades on. In eagerness after not seeing me after a while... she ran to me giving a tight and warm hug, planting a gentle kiss on my cheek. I used my hand to distance myself from her and asked her to look at me. She does as she is told, but through her smile you can see that she is surprised.

"Pay attention... Please" I said, to which she stood up straight and listened.

"You believe in destiny, right...?" I asked.

"Yea... off-course." She said abruptly

"I will ask you a few questions. Answer me with a pleasant mind, please." I requested.

"Ok sir...!" She salutes in army style and laughs.

I controlled my laugh... correcting myself to be serious for God sake.

"Kinjal... I love you so much. You are all I had in my head and heart. Now hear first and answer next." She shook her head in agreement. "Ok... here we go."

"What if someone kills me today evening on my way to home? What if your father or mother dead warns you and dead swears on themselves not to marry me...? What if I am cheating on you and you never know? What if I become abusive after marrying you? What if I demand you to give all the money as dowry without leaving anything to your parents? What if I keep an illegal connection and marry your cousin or someone?

I was looking at her face. There were many variations in her expressions and a tear falls down her cheek. This makes me said, but I have to continue to make my point.

"Kinjal... Honey...Please be patient. Let me complete what I need to say. Then you will know what is what. All these might be and will be hard to your ears and heart.

But my direct question is... If any of these happen in reality... Would you consider all these acts as destiny?"

"No... No... No..." She said, yelling and crying.

"If a tiger comes to attack you... You should run to keep yourself safe and alive. Right...? Instead, you can't stand erect in the same place and be a meal to it...thinking it as an act of destiny. By thinking it as your dooms day probably defines the lack of wisdom and people call it as foolishness in general, do you realize that...?" I shouted.

She wept bitterly and I thought that she might be seeing my point but of course her beliefs were from her mother, they were the only memory that she had. If she abandoned those memories, it is as if she would have nothing left from her mother.

# Stepping into Reality

" **Destiny always leaves you with ransom choices. Your instinct should elect/opt for the one... matching up the reality." I said to her as she fell asleep in my lap. I just let her sleep and happened to watch her face... eyes, lips, nose, hair... every bit of her.**

After a while, I saw her eye balls moving so rapidly. I can see the eyelids moving underneath the eyelash skin. That is what which often happens when someone is dreaming. If you read "The Interpretation of dreams" by Sigmund Freud... you can get a long possible glance on dreams and their interpretation. As I was closely watching her by bending on to her face with a low mere centimetres distance... She opened her eyes all of a sudden, giving me heartbreak.

She got up tensed and was humming;

"Mummy... mummy...!"

I hushed her by taking her onto my chest and tapping her shoulder. Pleasing her to cool down.

"A worst nightmare in the daytime..!" she said with a high voice.

Srujan, I should tell you this thing. We lived in a middle class colony in Gujarat. As we had a huge recession in our business, out of nowhere we saw the dung on the roads/flies all over/etc. When my dad went for work... a guy used to come to our home. After he left... my mom never left the bedroom. Instead she would keep crying. It was her Ex-boyfriend from her college days. But she was being blackmailed by him for many years. As that person has her pictures and love letters... she didn't want our pleasant life to get disturbed because of her past. The blackmailing guy sometimes took the money, and sometimes her body as consolation. When I got older...It was in my ninth standard. It was a dark night. My mom took me in her arms and was telling me to study well and be an asset to the family in all means.

She said, "You got to fear...When you don't have the guts to face the reality, when you don't have the guts in obeying the mistake and when you don't have anything to lose... Nothing, but the flesh of you. You have to believe in Destiny. "It does what it wants... no matter what you do" she said. And that night, "She hanged herself to the tree in the backyard..." My father never knew the reason behind it. He neither dared to ask me. "She died being a gem in the shell of our family." I know her. Whatever may be the past of her, she always thought I am her future. She believed in it though. That's why I say she is mother. As, Kinjal completed and left a sigh of sorrow in her face.

I was stunned and speechless, tears were all over my eyes dripping off my cheeks.

She didn't turn to me, and I did not move. For a while... silence was the biggest gap with an increased vacuum in between us and in our minds.

Taking a deep breath, "Kinjal...." I called.

She turned to me very slowly... with a red cheek, red nose and blurred eyes. When she cries in despair or thinks a lot and deeply. She suffers from headache... probably called Migraine in medical terms.

"Are you ok...?" I asked.

"Not at all." She replied.

"Come here honey... let me make you warm in my arms." She took my invitation and came in to me.

"Srujan...."

"Ha... tell me honey, what is it?"

"My past told me to believe in destiny. But my present tense is haunting me not to go with it anymore, hat shall I do?" she asked.

"Simple honey... Follow your instincts." I replied.

"I don't know how it can be to me. And I am shivering Srujan." "Yea, I know. I can feel it honey. Just be here." I said.

A couple of hours with me bought back her mood to normality, on the way back to home... she was tightly bonded to me by sitting back to me. It always feels good riding with a soul bonded back to you... by laying that one hand from your right shoulder to the chest. I don't know whether she keeps that hand of her on my heart to feel the heartbeat or to ensure that it beats for her only. Even I am well ensured of her heartbeat because; her heart is directly leaned to mine connecting the beats. Soulful beats sound melodious.

There was always a chance for me to kiss on her fist. And to her there was always a greater chance to kiss my shoulder/bite my ear. Which obviously makes a man horny..! And even she can feel it.

One need not to touch it in direct, to feel the heat.

The warmth always made a sweat in between... making a sticky layer to make the bond even stronger.

And sometimes, I felt her hand on my thigh. You know; it may go further down in secrecy.

(She is going to hang me for sure when she reads this) making organs of me harder and filled with that high boiled blood.

At that moment, I feel to stop the bike and go on an endeavour. But you know... Public makes it as the sensor board.

I got dropped out of our colony, which was of course a bit far from her home. And I never let go off her to my conscience. Literally, tears would roll in parallel to the waving hand.

The absence of her used to be in the form of presence of her voice. Which would always made my soul intact with hers. The only received call would be from her and the only message filled with all the love and vulgarity would be from her. Probably, she has it all in her mobile which was from my side. Phone bills were always paid by her with no regrets.

I began the walk to my home and I felt to have a smoke. I stopped at the tea stall in the way of mine. When I asked for a cigarette, I got an answer; "From when did this new habit get formed?"

Damn. I heard that voice somewhere before.

When I turned back it was one of my uncle.

Oh shit, I thought. "Uncle...! No... Yes." I was saying all the words which came to my mouth.

"Take care of your health son." He said and left tapping my shoulder.

For a while, I couldn't do anything. None of my family members know that I am smoking.

The Tea staler was giving me the cigarette calling "Brother... Take it" Damn. No thanks bro.

I just left the place silently worrying that uncle may complain about it to my dad or mom. But after five steps, my thinking had a drastic change. There by mumbling the words as "whatever let him complain. I am not a kid anymore."

My mobile was vibrating on my thigh. I took out see that it is...

"It's Kinjal"

"Hey honey. What happened? Reached home

Na..!"

"Yes dear, I did." But I want to invite you for to dine with me. Can you?" She asked.

"Wow...! Really? Wouldn't there be any problem with your parents?" I asked.

"Yea. It would be if there were in home." said her laughing out loud.

"Damn. That's awesome. I'll get ready and be there in twenty minutes. OK na..!" I said.

"20 minutes? Shut up. I want/need you in 2minutes. I am feeling to hug you and kiss you." said her and was showering all the flock of kisses on her mobile mic.

"Oh Dear. Please don't turn me on. I may do whatever I want and I may go places matching this generation, I am telling you." I said in a romantic voice over.

"Oh really..! It's all granted Mr. Lover of Generation. But Punctuality will be awarded something highly reputed thing. Come and get me." She hung up the call with a lustful voice and I was literally I was going mad.

I gave a call to my mom and said her that I will be staying over at my friend home for the night.

She refused at first but you know, she is mom. Pleasing her will melt her at any situation.

I went the way I was walking to her home. It was an apartment in which her flat was in the 5th floor which was indeed the last one. Fortunately the elevator was working thereby saving my energy.

I gave her a ring, to signal to her that she should open the door. She opened the door in quirk as she was literally waiting for me standing behind the door itself.

"Oh good god..!" I thought when I saw her in the skirt which was struggling to cross the knees down.

"Woo... You're damn hot. I..." I was in the verge of telling something and she dragged me inside. There by closing my mouth following the door.

"Just don't talk. Kiss me..!" She murmured in my ear.

I flipped her to the wall and started the flow by planting a stream of kisses moving from forehead, eyes and cheeks to neck and down and down.

"Young blood... Nothing was in our minds. Except the speed..!"

She asked me to carry to her bedroom. I never carried her or any woman in my arms. Not for a bedroom even.

I did it and I made her lay on the bed in gentle.

I took back a step and removed my shirt at ease.

While she was undressing herself... 'Stop' I said.

"Why?" she said in a surprise.

"I will do it." I said hitting with a wink.

"Mmm...

It's yours.

Be gentle." She whispered.

Lousy skirt is dropped by our kissing foot from her thighs and legs. Her skin tight top was way high attractive. But I unclipped it and those hooks so easily. The knowledge I got by watching the tutorial of unhooking the bra in YouTube in my pre-school days was just rooted in my brain.

"Honey... this night is all ours." I said.

'Wait...' She said.

'Ha...'

"This is our first time right..! We will do it in the candle light." She said.

"Wah..!

Candle lit romance..!" I watched that scene only in the movies but never got a chance of it.

She brought the candles from the drawers of her desk and I took the lighter from my pocket.

I lit every candle, where she carried it and placed in some safe corners far from us. I turned off the light when she was diagonal to me.

Those short steps of us paced our heart beat in an enormous way. "Kinjal ... I just love you..!" "I love you to the moon. These candles shall be the eyewitness for our love and its making." She said in that incandescent glow of those crying candles.

We saw ourselves nude for the first time.

From the forehead to the barefoot, we touched, caressed with our fingers.

In the incandescence, our shadows started making love, by embracing each other, leaving the bite marks and nail scratches, in the midst of love, which is all love, pain is there, but its ecstasy. Enjoying the nature in a natural way is nature, where happiness is granted as it's owned. Exhale is inhaled, Inhale is exhaled.

"Kinjal ...this night shall last forever, in the dream of staying young forever." I said.

A moan with a sticky kiss on my neck was the reply I've got.

"Honey bee pollinates, Nature is the reason.

She as an ice, me as a coal,

My heat ye... melted her,

In the dew bath,

Our warm bodies were wet, blending in sweat..! A cell from my flesh was dropped, in her flesh of blood.

Virginity be a taboo..!

"You are beautiful" I said.

"You are fit and strong" She said.

Dipping me into the ocean of beauty was her part. Taking over her to the ecstasy was my part time shall not know the hunger. Darkness shall never cross the leap, over the horizon. Me to her, her to me..!

Those moans from her in a sweet pain made me go way into her. Sweat crawled to slope from our bodies, warm bodies..! Kissing over the sultry bodies never mattered to us. Instead drew into another galaxy of stars. Sometimes biting is sweet. But I hankered after a big stream of kisses. Pleasure was the treasure for that night. That thrust, that pain that pleasure..! The night ended with our sweat and blood. They say... One will get sleep post sex. But we couldn't sleep that night at all. But our thrust had no limit.

Early in the morning at about 5 o'clock we were both exhausted.

"Honey... look how destiny made us do it..!" She said. I thought, oh... she is thinking its destiny again and I felt bad for a second.

"Hmm yea. When we are together it is destiny.

Else it is not..!" Think so... I said.

"Hmm...

Anyway, come here I want to hug you..!" She said.

I stayed there with her till 6 AM and I left her door. While walking to my home, I texted her; "The night will be a memorable one in our heart. I left a note on your spine. Check it out."

"Idiot; when did you write it? Wait, I should go for a mirror." She said.

I was laughing reading that message. My phone was buzzing with in a minute. I was expecting a message from her to be frank.

"Umm Kinjal. A very good morning and what is your spine telling you? Can you read it? Ha... ha... ha..." I was asking her in desperation.

"Oh honey. First tell me when did you write it and then I'll tell you what it is written. Ok na..!" she said with such a sweet voice in order of convincing me.

"Umm... How could you forget dear darling? You took a small nap when I was busy in washroom. When I was back, I felt too good looking at the way you were sleeping.

So I felt to write it and I did it. Now tell me what it is written. I am all ears." I said. "My darling wrote it as, 'You are beautiful however you are'." She said.

Yes you are honey. I will tell the same line even in our 50's if we are alive by that time.

"You know Srujan. Today when I was under you, I felt as a woman comforting her husband." she concluded with an electronic voice kiss which are heard by ears and felt by my heart wreaking my nerves and bringing a smile on my face.

Whenever she hung up the call. She comes back to me as a message. Love symbol with a smooch smiley came to my mobile for that moment. In turn I sent a smooch smiley.

Till the day she had that robust feeling on destiny; we discussed nothing of our caste, religion, status, aims, goals, family details, our past, etc.., etc.., because what all we ate, drink and swallowed was love. Just love.

But since the day that robust belief of her was eroded by me indirectly... the above all discussions were raised in an enormous way. We thought it is our right to know each and every bit of our past life, even the cultural life and social life.

Chatting was our biggest weapon, which was continued even though we were in our washrooms. It didn't matter. Because it's just a mobile phone (It cannot sense smell or see something right...?)

It was around 10' O clock in the dark. My phone buzzed when I was in the middle of a family prayer meeting. Which we had occasionally, when our church father visited our door. I couldn't resist from taking out the mobile and reading the message from her. But you know, my mom eyes were damn sharp on me. Because she knew it that I became a mobile savvy.

But I had to reply her; my brain winded me. I got up by signalling with my little finger up which means I need to take a piss very urgently. All of them around me saw it unfortunately. And they laughed by closing their mouth.

"Damn..." I said in my mouth.

I came out and closed back my door because our house owner doesn't like the sound of the crowd singing psalms. In which we always took care of.

And I took out the mobile from my pocket with eagerness thinking it was from Kinjal but you know, it was the customer care for my death sake. Forgetting that I came out of a prayer meet; I scolded all the vulgar words which came to my mouth on the spot.

And when it was in my hand itself, it buzzed again. This time for my fortune, it showed as "Message from Kinjal ". I forgot all the words which came in the past few seconds.

I opened it.

"What is my hero doing, when heroine is feeling bored?"

"Hero is in a prayer meet with family singing psalms together." I replied.

"What are psalms?" She replied with a jaw drop smiley.

"You know, we do have prayers occasionally when our church father visits us to preach gospel." I replied.

"Oh...! So, you are a Christian?" she replied with exclamation.

"What is there with the religion anyway? Love is enough for two hearts in gratitude." I responded.

Before that we never had a chat regarding our respective religions or something like that. But that day, I had a strange feeling that, she did think something weird about it. I felt to know that.

"Why didn't you ever mention your religion?" she pinged me after a while.

"Honey, we never had that chance to such conversations" right...!

"Why are you regretting for that at this point of time? What is the matter?" I replied.

"You know, we as a family go to temple." "And your family goes to church" right...?

"Yea... what's there in it?

Why are we having this discussion?" I replied.

"No... nothing. Leave it. I will text you later" She replied.

That was the most irritating and confused moment I've ever gone through. Girls always break the conversation in the middle of something important and freak out the guy. Why does it always happen? Isn't she consistent? I asked for myself to ask her.

That night I had a recall from my family members. And I re-joined the prayer which was on a final prayer.

That night, I didn't get any text from her. That was the night I knelt down and had a prayer with folding fingers tighter with the chin leaned to the chest. I just made it "not to make her away from me in any case."

I fell asleep immediately after I was done with the prayer.

The next day morning my phone was buzzing and that was my alarm for the day. I couldn't find it though. I finally discovered that it was under my pillow. I dragged it and for a morning wish, I can see that was from Kinjal.

I received; wishing... "Good morning honey... Love you and a few kisses which were audible

to her ears very clearly."

"Good morning honey... Still on bed? Lazy idiot. Come on... get ready and come out. I am waiting for you in the car which is parked in front of your house." She rocked and I am shocked.

"What what...? Why are you in front of my home? My mom must be out there. She is going kill me if she finds you." I shouted.

Stop yelling darling. You do always come to my lane and horn the hell out signalling me to come outside. Right...? Now it's my turn.

"I'll give you five minutes. Else I'll step out and walk right away into your door." She warned and cut the call.

I was in a hustle of getting myself ready and get into that fucking car. But you know, it always happened in our home. I went and sat in my washroom. I discovered the worst part of it as "water is not running". "Oh... shit." I nuzzled.

Mummy... Mummy..! I shouted like hell. And you know, she is too busy having a chit chat with my owner aunty and the neighbour one. Their subject would always be the previous day Episode of a boring serial. Damn... I am fucked for today. I thought for myself.

I can hear my phone ringing. I know that must be Kinjal. I am so dead today. I was getting frustrated and pulling my hair.

I heard the main door opening geek sound. I am totally fixed that it must be my mom. "Mom, the pipe is blowing the dry air, but not water. Ask owner aunty to switch **on** the motor. Else place the bucket of water right in front of the bathroom door and please go out. I am in the middle of something shitty." There was all silence in the room and breaking it; I heard the bucket getting filled manually. And, I heard that bucket was placed in front of the door and handle of bucket left loose from a fist. Finally the door got locked. At-last I stood up in some awkward position.

"Wish there was tissue paper at least." I thought.

I opened the door to drag the bucket.

I saw a leg shaking down to the table. I got up and looked in shock. It was Kinjal... I was damn nude in such an awkward moment. She was laughing hell enough void to controlling the laugh by closing her whole mouth with her hands.

She finally got settled on the floor and was laughing on laughing. I got nothing in mind but a shocked moment though.

I picked the bucket and closed myself in the door. Had myself cleaned in hustle followed by a quick bath. Dressing up rugged, I rushed out of my home with an embarrassed face.

After complaining to my owner that the overhead tank is empty, I went directly to the car while my mom came out of home desperately to watch where I was running. I opened the car door and closed it rough and nuzzled a bit.

"Had a clean bath?" She asked in a funny mode.

I couldn't control myself and started laughing. She joined me and started the car. We just passed by my mom. But she couldn't signify who was beside me in the car, as it was tinted.

First question I raised was; "what the fuck were you doing in my home?"

"What the fuck were you doing in that awkward state raising the bucket?" She countered.

I feel so embarrassed Kinjal. Stop it please.

Be a man Srujan... we even had sex. We both have seen ourselves in nude.

"But not in that shitty position, right...?" I said. "Ok... tomorrow you can see me." Is it ok...! She replied with amazement.

What...?

"Really? You.... Will...."

Stop. That was a joke. Don't fly in the dreams now. She countered.

"Uff... any way, didn't my mom see you walking into the door?" I asked.

No, I saw her going to the neighbour home. They locked the door. I observed that and saw this was the chance.

"You are lucky." I replied.

"No idiot. You were lucky." She countered pointing her finger.

"How is that?" I asked with a determined look.

"You could have ended up in between the four walls for no doubt." She said.

"Oh...!! Please let's end this talk for god sake." I said.

"Ok... ok....! Honey... kiss me please." She said moving her cheek towards me.

How could I resist...? A chance to kiss her in the middle of traffic. For note; the glass is tinted.

I did it so firmly that she almost got away from the clutch and jumped the wheel to a 2 wheeler.

She apologized with a cuter expression she ever had by sliding the window down. He said sorry to her in return and left with a smile on his face.

"Damn... If, I was in hold of the steering. There would be a big crowd in no time." I said.

She was laughing. "It's just tact to get pleased by the opposite gender. As the attraction goes on needed for the human life." She said.

"You are right... As long as guys do have those oozing hormone, it goes on." I said.

Don't be a philosopher for now. Please Srujan. My neck aches, please give me a smooth massage.

"Onto which side did you sleep last night...?" I asked while pressing her neck.

"As I was alone in the bed, I had to sleep on the floor with a double pillow down to head and watch football." She said.

"Really... who won last night?" I asked desperately.

"She gave a head turn" and said "I thought you would ask me why I put 2pillows or why on the floor...?" "He He...! I showed my teeth."

She kept calm.

"You didn't tell me who won last night...!" I asked again to make her angry and laugh.

She stopped the car and asked me to drive.

"Is it the revenge?" I asked. "Whatever" she said.

Hm... I sighed and agreed to skip places by on condition of not stepping outside. She took it as a romantic trial by me and agreed for the task.

Such moments would always be a memorable one to think and to generate a smile from heart. I always had it and enhanced the option of creating as many as possible.

Coming to the situation, I asked her to hop her leg onto my side at prime. She did it. Now it's my turn to step, and I did it. I was catching hold of her hip so firmly that she almost got a nerve break down. Out of balance, we just got settled over there itself.

She got settled on my..... You know.

I took a deep breath. Hot exhale was blowing onto her skin on the neck part. This always drives a woman crazy. My fingers are doing their part in going places. They are doing what they tend to do. She was in a 3/4th skirt on my interest. I love her in it.

She was trying to turn to me in an anti-clock wise direction but in vain. We felt little uncomfortable due to lack of boot space and our extended thighs.

"Honey... I think rear seats are very comfortable for this thing. What do you say?" I said.

She just shook her head and dropped her head down with that lousy hair covering her all face. I can see in the rear mirror clearly.

"Yes, it is. But not here. Let's go to some place private. I want to speak to you even." She said.

Cool. Right away I released the hand break and hit the gas as fast I can.

We have gone for a highway. Which we called as a blind ride (long ride with no destination in mind) obviously. In a time of 2 ½ hours we have reached Kunthala Waterfalls which was 200km away from our place.

During the 2hours journey we had sung together along with the speakers in the car with an amplifier. We both enjoyed time together always.

Consequently, post reaching the place. We parked our car under a tree and went on for a walk to the water falls. Descending the rocks which were slippery was the tough part but it helped us to show the care which we have for each others. I was watching over her and she was in-turn. Walking side by side holding the hand was quite good.

Reaching the place we had some photographs, so called selfies. Some guys said we adore each other. That made us to hold together tighter mainly in front of them.

After a while I bought a coconut with a straw in it for both of us. We sipped it with little concentration by making sound of sucking the water drops from the pipe and coconut shell. Little children were laughing and teasing us by our weird sounds. In-fact we had a lot of fun.

We spent 2hours over there walking around and watching the scenic place. Breaking the wall, "do you read bible daily?" she asked.

"Pardon...!" I said.

"What your ears listened is what I exactly asked." She said.

"Do you read the Holy Bible daily?

What kind of question is that?" I said.

"What is wrong in it?

I questioned a right one. Is there anything to hide in this?" she said.

"Ok. Ok. I do read. I do pray daily. What is the point in it?" I said.

"How could you find not anything in this? It is a sensible issue. Do you think my parents will agree to marry a Christian guy?" she said with a moody face.

"Do you think that my parents will agree to marry a Hindu girl?" I countered.

She remained calm for much of a time... which she always does it in distress and confusion. I understood that something was eating her brain and sucking the love of the blood from her heart.

"Honey... Please. We never discussed about our past/ religion/ status/ goals, etc., we never even had that much time in such topics. Because we were mad in love.

That's all I know. I know your face. Your name. Your heart. Your habits. Your hobbies. Your cell number. Your apparels and costumes. What all, which is related to you, is all saved in my brain so clearly. I don't care about our families or status or religion or caste or something in the worldly pleasure. What all I care about is You. That's it, please let's bury this thing about religion and all here itself." I concluded it neatly.

"No... this is not the girl in destiny anymore. I want to know each and every thing about you in all the perspectives like religion/caste/status/ family/goals. By the time of sunset, I shall get acknowledged clearly about you. You can ask and know about me in turn, if you needed." She said.

"Ok. Start Kinjal. Start the questionnaire. I am right in front of you." I said.

"Are your parents converted? As your name is Srujan.

How come is that possible?" She asked me with a doubted mind and eyebrows up.

"My grandparents converted on their interest. Consequently my parents were in their shoes. It came to us even. But I am not against any of the religion. I follow my religion. Respect the other one. Nothing to be deceased in our love on this matter." I said.

"Ok... For instance, just think that our parents have agreed for our marriage. Then as per which religion shall we marry? Is it in a church? Or is it in a temple?" Tell me Srujan.

"If we get married somehow and later on our kids shall ask us which religion they shall follow. What are you going to tell them? Every Sunday take them to church and every morning I'll give them harathi. Is that fine for you?" she said.

I was calm for a while. "You know Kinjal. There is no reason to be raised in love. Don't care about your surroundings. Don't care about the people who don't give a shit when you are in deep shit." I said.

But Srujan, I am concerned about culture and traditions of our family. As my mother always keep telling me and grooming me. I shall be concerned about them in reality for sure. Are you getting my point?

"Yea... yea. I am." I said.

"Hmm..." she sighed.

"Shall I tell you a story of theory? Don't think as a philosophy lecture, but you will get the point for sure. Trust me." I said.

"Ok... I am all ears." She said.

"Ok, here goes....There was a Girl who belonged to an upper caste in town. She was least concerned about the caste and religion but her parents had it in blood. She fell in love with a guy who belonged to other religion and caste. They always were deep throbbed in love. They always worried about the way to convince their parents. Finally, the day has come. The girl dared to convey the whole matter to her parents. She summoned all the strength from the guy by speaking to him on call and went to her dad. She stood in front of her dad. She conveyed the matter about the love. But nothing about caste or religion. Her dad invited the guy for a formal meet in the house.

The girl went with flying colours to the guy and conveyed the news very happily. He took that everything is going swift and took it for granted. When the guy reached her house, he was neatly dressed in a formal way with a tucked shirt. He introduced himself to her dad and they spoke for a while on further goals and issues. Finally, breaking the throat, the girl father asked the guy; "what is your caste?"

"It is not the same as yours uncle." Guy said.

"As per the way you stood in front of a harathi, I can tell you are not even on the same platform of religion. Right...?" said the girl father.

"Nice observation uncle. You are absolutely right.

Are you insisting of marrying you daughter because of these reasons?" Guy responded.

"You are smart and fair in human and personality. But marriage is something beyond them. An inter-caste marriage doesn't last for long. I have seen many. You may please forget my daughter and leave this room and her heart in empty." Girls' father warned him swiftly

The guy left the home without any word with due respect on elders. There was no contact with the girl for a couple of months. An early morning the guy got a call from a local hospital requesting him to donate blood stating the emergency of his blood group. The guy rushed towards the hospital. He went on that track and t-shirt in which he was. When he went and dialled the number from which he got call, "it was a doctor". He met him and the doctor was asking him rush to the top floor. The doctor stood right outside the lift door. As the door opened, the nurse in the lift dragged me out. It is a rare blood group; we need white blood cells for her. She lacks in them and it is very urgent.

"Who... who is she?" Guy asked.

Ooh...! Just wait. We are walking to her itself. As, they entered into the ICU section... The doctor called a middle aged person who was standing in front of the door. As he turned, the guy was shocked to see; it was the girl father. Even the Girls' father left jaw opened in front of him and his generosity to the society.

"You are the one with this blood group?" the father asked.

"Yes sir. Unfortunately" the guy said.

"Why is it unfortunate?" father asked.

"You must have expected blood from a person from a relevant caste or religion according to your interest. Sorry sir, I came here and disappointed you. I would never do that again. It's my word." Guy said and was stepping back from him.

Doctor tried to stop the guy and convince him as it is his duty, to save a life. He knows the value of a life.

"I thought, I came to donate blood for a human sir. Not for who act to be so.

"Wearing a being human t- shirt doesn't make you human, in-return tells you to be so when you face a mirror."

The Girls' father was left speechless for a while. What all he can do is to please the guy. But the guy turns back as his instinct tells him that it's not time to take revenge.

Ok... come on doctor. I will give blood to my soul-mate. But I don't want to see this man who asks caste certificate for a marriage... until I complete the blood transaction. I may not marry her but at least my blood shall be pumping in her heart until her last breath. I would be grateful for that. The girl's father thinks much, as he walks down the stairs. He will be having a smoke and the guy comes down after the process is completed with the doctor. He unlocks the car which is right beside the car of girl father.

"Oh...! Why every unfortunate thing is happening to me only this day?" Boy thought.

Girl father walks to him and apologizes for what he has done. But he doesn't talk about marriage or something.

Boy leaves by telling sorry from there and pitying the mind set of that father.

"See Kinjal.... This is what happens. When it comes to the matter of life or death, caste and creed are nothing" I said.

"Hmm... Great story. Please try to tell this one to my dad." Kinjal said.

It was a counter. But I ignored.

"Ok. Please let's have something for our stomach." I said.

Okay... What shall we eat?

"Fish? Please today morning I sensed the roasted smell from a neighbourhood. Since then saliva is racing in my mouth." I said.

"Fish...? Damn... I don't eat it." She said.

"Really...?" I looked with a surprise.

"Great... Now don't tell me that you never know that I am a Vegetarian." She shouted.

Really...? I said gazing with a bit more surprise.

"Go to hell. I am leaving." She yelled at me and was walking away from me.

"Stop there you filthy woman..." I shouted.

What did you say?

"Damn... nothing, nothing. Just a joke. Idiotic joke." I said.

"But in practicality, do you know that I am a Non-vegetarian?" I asked.

She stopped her walk right there and turned to me.

"I am sorry Srujan. I was a bit rude." She said.

"Yea... yea. I know. Leave it. Come here give me hug." I said.

Without any insist, she gave it warmly. It was the only medicine which we had for each intention and feeling without any prescription from a doctor.

Doctors suggest one to laugh more to be happy. But we hug more in finding happiness. Fare to be fair. We had corn and sprouts. Do you have anything more to ask?

"Yea... yea... many more." She said.

"Did you make a list or what?" I asked in amusement.

"He He... yes I did. Wouldn't I get proper answers or what..?" she said.

"Anytime at your service." I said.

It's getting late Kinjal. Shall we start to home? It's cloudy though. I know you have many things to ask but I am ready to answer at any cost. Even you know that.

"Ok... I think we can talk while driving also. You handle the steering. Punishment." she said.

Hmm... Can hero resist heroine words...? Never.

I took on the steering and hit the gas.

"We should enter the city before it's too late." I said.

"Why? Are they closing the entry to the city after sunset? Tell me I say." She countered.

"Sense of humour ka tho kuch Kum naye" I said in a low voice.

What? What? You said something. Tell me now.

Ha Ha... nothing, nothing. I said the clutch is play.

"You never know how to lie Srujan. Tell me, else I'll bite right away." She said. Wow... If it is on lips, it would be grateful. Either way, they are dried; see... I turned to her with a pre smooch look.

Acha... See, my hero's Romantic mode is always ON.

Will you shut down the mode for now...? Why am I sweating? She tried to increase the AC but I held her.

Oh... honey. See, the climate is so pleasant. I slid both windows down. Such a fresh air blew her hair and there was an instant smile on her face and eyes which in-turn made my heart smile.

She guided her head out of the window for a half of it. And I monitored the left mirror slightly to see her face and the happiness in it. She was beautiful.

The setting rays were making her skin shine. Blowing air was driving through her hair, not giving a chance to beat her eyelashes. Her hands were playing in the air. Ear rings were dancing.

I slowed down a little and she forgot all the things discussed. She turned to me to say something and out of nowhere a truck blew horn to wake us up to the real world. We got shivered for a second.

I saw the truck in the rear mirror, which was back to our ass.

I just steered to the left by signalling the left indicator. He moved on. Crazy truck drivers I thought.

Kinjal was in a shock that we almost got hit by it.

I was laughing by looking at her expression, which I used to do it all the time towards my sister's expressions anyway.

She gave a head turn to me; my laugh held a disc break "Are you OK honey?" I asked.

"Srujan, I love you so much."

There was silence filled in the car. After the truck left us a shock, I closed the windows. I stopped the car to the left under a tree in random. And you know, drizzling started.

I felt it as the scene from many movies. But you know, movies are made from reality. I confronted myself.

"Honey... come here, give me a hug. Are you afraid or in a shock?" I rubbed her back slowly. "No Srujan, at that second when horn blew I was completely gone blank. I felt something was happening to us. I felt it was drawing you away from me."

"Sshhh... Sshhh...Calm down... calm down...Nothing happened dear. Many trucks go by this way as its highway. And at that moment, you drew my attention. So I ignored the rear mirror. Sorry honey... calm down now. See, you're as safe as I'm bonded in a hug of warmth."

"I love you. I love you." she said.

"I know honey. I do love you more than this world." I said.

In the meanwhile, I felt a drop on my neck. As, I was in a round neck t-shirt. I felt the drop so fast.

I released her from me and took her jaws in my hands. Is my angel crying? Even when I am with her. How come is that possible?

"Nothing... Nothing ... Srujan. Just a flow. I never know." She said.

I always wondered, why girls cry by hiding something in their heart... It confused me though."

"It's hard to predict a heart of one." I thought.

"What are you thinking?" She asked.

Nothing honey. Nothing, I said in a hurry burry.

"No, there is something which you aren't telling me. You never know how to lie. I know you." She said.

"Shit... I thought. If I spell out what I felt, she is going to kill me." I thought.

"Nothing honey, it was just a casual thing. I think I forgot my lighter in the pant of mine, which I left hanging in my room. What if my mom gets it.... that was running in my mind." I said.

"baad me jaa..." She scolded in Guajarati.

"Keeping girlfriend beside and your thinking of the lighter which is left in some bugger pocket...?? LOL." She said and unlocked the door to step out of the car.

I caught her hand tight stopping her from stepping out of the car. "What...?" She asked in hesitation.

"It's not some bugger, it is my pant and my pocket." I said.

By the way for your kind information, it's raining honey." I reminded her again.

She got angry with that word, thinking it as satire on her. But I didn't mean it at all.

"Get off me you lighter." She yelled and stepped out of the car and slammed the door.

"Shh... relax Srujan. Count the numbers now. You got to tackle the situation patiently." I said for myself.

I stepped out of the car. Rain has stopped, but the left out drops from the leaves and branches are being sprinkled on us randomly with the blowing wind.

Kinjal.... what's with you?

Come on. Let's get inside of the car. We have to reach home before the rain gets worse as it's dangerous to drive by the steep way ahead.

"Aha...! What happens? Are we going to die for just an accident? If is it so, I would be grateful for the fucking life and fucking love. I don't have any clarity in any of the future of the relationship. Do you? If so, get my ears some clarity please." she said.

"Ha... OK OK. Done. We will have all of them discussed? But tell me what's bugging your brain and heart?"

"You think my heart and mind is bugged by some chaotic words or worldly pleasures? Pity you Srujan. Pity you." She just shouted on my face and walked onto the car hitting the ground in frustration.

I just stood there looking at her angry deeds and innocent mind-set by keeping my hand opposing the head light vision.

###

### Dealing with Reality

I just took a deep breath and I am all wet. I get easily attracted to the cold in response to getting wet in rain.

I got into the car after a while and closed the door. Looking out of the blurred window, I was all silent thinking something which I never know. I didn't even look at her. As she must know what it is, else these silly fights may lead to worse and there comes a failure in solving them.

In view of breaking the silence in the car, I switched on the wipers to do their job in showing us a clearer view in that restarted heavy rain.

She just got jolted for that sudden sound of wipers and held her hand on me. And I didn't respond to any of it.

"I am sorry Srujan. Look at me, I know it's hard for you but you know; something is really bugging me off." She said.

"Aha... what is it honey?" I asked while I got relaxed towards her.

Her phone was ringing... But we can't find it. Finally Kinjal found it under the seat.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"It's Shravani." She said and answered the call in hurry.

I was thinking so deep, who might be Shravani...!

"Oh man...! Come on... you are sitting beside your girlfriend." Said... the soul.

She finally hung up the phone and immediate question from my mouth was...

"Who is Shravani?"

"She is my best friend. She promised me that she will introduce me to her as a Poet/Writer who is my Lover" she said.

Wah...! Wah...!

"Then, when are we meeting?" I asked in excitement.

Hmm. Soon Srujan.

But be careful with her ah..! She is a mind reader and a very close one to my family also. I always think that she is the one who can speak and handle my dad in convincing about our marriage.

"Oh...! So she is a very important player in our game ah..! I will tackle her in my way." I said.

"Let us see..." she said.

"Come on... let's go. It's getting late." She said.

I was happy that she forgot the previous discussion.

We drove with the joy in singing together and finally reached our place. Leaving me in-front of my home... She drove away.

As I was getting near to our gate... I heard someone running. I turned back and it was someone with a great body.

"Excuse me...!" I said.

"Yea... excused for now. But next time you are ass is going to undergo a kickass scene. Mind it...! Don't be shocked. I was referring to the matter of the Girl with whom you are in love with. She is my only cousin sister. Don't you dare hurt her...!" He said and left the place by running.

Ushh....! **"** Why do girls with curves have brothers with muscles...?" I questioned by looking at the sky.

Whilst opening the gate, my sister stood up back of the tree stem and left me scared for a second.

Hmmm... Did you listen everything?

"Yes... every bit of it." She said.

"Ok... I have had enough for this day. And how much you need to hide it in the roots of this tree?" I asked.

"500bucks." She said.

"You got to be kidding me...!" I said.

Come on... I am grown up now. Even I have some expenses brother.

"Ok ok... Take it, I have 400 only. I'll see the change later." I said and left to my room.

"Where did you go nani?" My mom questioned.

"Ah...! It was Just with friends for an outing." I said.

"And... who was that in the car today morning?" She asked. I expected this question. But not in-front of my father. He tells nothing but just kills with his looks. Damn... I should find the answers from them.

I refused the conversation as I had much for the day and I went to my room to refresh myself.

Had a shower and slept instantly in a zig zag way in my style.

#

# Life continues

Cuckoo woke me up the next morning with its natural given gift of song. I don't know why but I felt to have a smoke. I seldom have smoke in mornings.

Dad must have left to office. It was late already, so I configured that mom went for the milk packet herself.

So, I fit myself into the track and left to the Tea stall in the centre of our colony. I ordered lemon tea and lit the cigarette. Leaving the smoke into the air made me feel relaxed. Almost it was dragged to half, then; I saw two ladies walking towards me in the same road. I felt both of them as familiar ones.

Done with the fag and left the filter tip on to the ground and crushed it under my feet.

Sipping the hot lemon tea... I was curiously watching the ladies who were walking towards me. Finally after a few seconds, I found who they are.

Shit... One was my mom. Other one was Kinjal.

What...? I was damn confused and left the glass in tension. It broke into pieces. I apologized to the tea stalker. As I knew him since many years, he said nothing. But I left the money for him on the desk.

Damn...! What am I seeing? I was pulling my hair and scratching my skull with my grown up nails.

I ran to my home in utter confusion and fear. I don't know what I was doing but, I started brushing by the time our gate sound creaked.

I saw Kinjal walking in... "What the fuck am I watching?" I thought.

I couldn't be silent or shout in joy...

But there was a type of feeling, in which fear/doubt/happiness are dwelt in much.

I was standing in veranda. My brush stopped touching my tooth anymore.

That's it...!

They both went inside. And my brush slipped from my mouth.

"What's happening here?"

I was dying to know what's happening with utter excitement and fear. By goggling my mouth with water. I ran inside to see with my own eyes.

Kinjal was sitting on the couch and mom was in kitchen. They both were speaking void having/keeping a wall in between them.

I signalled to Kinjal; "what is happening?"

She was teasing me with a tongue outside and with some variety expression. I was left laughing instead of the utter fear which was until the past few minutes.

Mom came into the hall. "Nani... come, she is Kinjal. Because of her I am alive today. Thank her first; she is the goddess for us from today." Mom said.

"Wo wo wo... what happened to you mom? Why did you go the market? You could have waked me up for the milk packet Na..!" I said.

"Cool down... Nothing serious, Bus break failed and losing control the driver made it to the market directly. Someone pulled me and in the forecast of the bus coming, I pulled your mom. Even I didn't know what was happening for a few seconds.

Everyone was shouting. And fortunately we both are alive." Kinjal said.

"Thank god. And thank you so much Kinjal. I hugged her in front of my mom with tears in my eyes." I forgot my mom who was standing over there...

"Cool down now Srujan... We are in your home, don't forget that." She murmured in my ear.

Oh shit...! I said in my mouth and pushed her back by conveying my apologies to her in front of my mother.

My mom didn't mind it luckily.

"Ok... I'll be right back" I said and left into my bedroom.

My mom and Kinjal were having a chit chat sitting in the hall room. My mom shows the photo album to every special guest who visits our home. And the album has all the photos since our childhood to the present one. My dad used to take us to the photo studio for every birthday. In the same R.R. Photo Studio, Raju uncle was famous and he was the one who snapped every picture of our life time in the colony. It was the only photo studio in our colony. So, almost all my friends do have the same background in the childhood pictures.

One of the nude photos was there in the album which was snapped when I was a 9months baby, which I tried to tear apart many times. But my mom used to be in tears, whenever I tried to do it. So, it was all clear in the album which I will be like showing my little thing to all of the guests. They used to laugh while seeing it, so I was always pretending to play outside whenever my mom took the album outside. It was a little embarrassing moment.

And coming to the room, Kinjal also saw it. She was laughing, while she was asking my mom. "Aunty, is this your son?"

"Ha ha...! Yes... That's him. He cries all the time, seeing this photo. He tried to tear it many times. But I was quite sentimental to this picture, because, we never had any photos in our childhood. At least my children should have them as memories to show them to the coming generations." Mom said.

"Don't worry aunty. I hope he will never do so. Ok... aunty, it's getting late... I should go to college. I have an exam today." Kinjal said.

"Aha...! Don't worry dear... Nani will drop you at college. You just have these fruits." Mom said.

I was sitting in my room but my ears are all in the main room. I was jumping with joy that something is going to work out, after all.

"Nani..."Mom shouts.

"Ha... mummy, I am coming."

"What your parents does Kinjal?" My mom asked.

"Dad is a government employee and mom died in my early teens." Kinjal said. "Oh...! I am sorry Kinjal. Hope everything is okay now." Mom said.

"Yes, aunty... It's been a long time but her absence is always a loop in our home." Kinjal said.

"Don't worry beta... Everything will be alright. You can come; visit our home anytime from now on." My mom said.

"Wah...! Kya baath hai...! I love you mom...!" I said and started dancing in my room.

Kinjal starred at the watch again. My mom understood that it's getting late.

"Nani...! Come fast na...! It's getting late for Kinjal." My mom says.

"May be... my mom would have understood well without my word out, if she was also alive." Kinjal said.

"Oh... honey. Come here. Don't feel so. Whatever happens, there will be a reason. God bless you and be with you all the time." Mom showered her kindness and blessing to Kinjal.

I was dancing like anything listening to the conversation. After listening to my tenth result, this is the time I danced for something which my ears laid attention to.

Finally, I entered into the main room. And they both were waiting for me eagerly. "Ok...lets go Kinjal" I said.

"You remember the name very well ah..!" Mom said.

I showed my teeth to her and was walking out. "Wait... wait... Kinjal...! My mom said and

ran into the bed room."

Kinjal turned to me and lifted an eyebrow with folded lips out asking... "Why..?" I too reciprocated with the same expression to her telling, "I've no idea".

Mom came out with a Dress material in her hand. Take these Kinjal, it's a token of your kind heart.

Kinjal couldn't refuse it and held them safe in her hands. "Thanks a lot aunty. See you soon. You have a great heart too." Kinjal said.

We left out of home and I started the bike which was my cousins, which he parks it in our home whenever he goes to village or any camps.

Luckily, the very before day he left it in our home.

As soon as we crossed our colony, Kinjal hugged me tight from back side. "Oh... Nani, today I am so happy."

"Aha...! I too honey. I was on the cloud nine when my mom hugged you with a kind gesture. She doesn't like everyone. Once she loves, she never leaves." I said.

"Yea... You are lucky to be her son." Kinjal said.

"Yes... I am being her son."

Finally, we have reached college. She got down and planted a kiss on my cheek in front of the main gate. I was shocked and was feeling proud in getting kissed in public by her. It's an every guy day dream.

"Nani... Tomorrow I will bunk class. Are you free?" "I have a lab tomorrow." I said.

"Shit... Then how?" she said.

I'll think of it and let you know. You just run to your class. It's getting late. "Ok ok... bye honey. Take care." She left.

#

# First Love

The following day, I texted her to wait at the Depot and she was on time but she came by car. I was on bike. I was thinking, what to do... All of a sudden, I saw Bobby... sitting in the bus stop waiting for the bus. He is my best friend, whom I met in my pre-school life.

I said hi and offered him the bike to have it for the rest of the day. And he accepted it very happily. I said I will take it tonight and requested him not to go by the lane of my home. He showed his teeth and disappeared from my sight.

"I got into the car. It was such a romantic perfume.... I was dying to sniff her whole body. She was laughing, come on idiot... It's depot. Let's run from here first. Later you can sniff." She said.

"Ok... do you know where are we going now?"

I asked.

"Nope... any surprise?"

"Yep... Stop in the next turn, I will drive." I said.

She did it happily. I took the wheel and sped away out of city as soon as possible.

Then I slowed down, because it was a pleasant road at those early hours.

"Let me guess... are we going to your college?" She asked.

"Brilliant you are. That's a yes." I said.

"Wow... I have never been in this route. These running places are pretty cool. Shall I slide the window down?" She asked.

"Why not? It's your car.

You can do whatever you want... Even get naked for my sake ;) "I said.

"Ha ha... stop being naughty Srujan. Ok come on tell me...!

I want to know your past. I mean, did you love anyone? Any first love?" she asked.

"Ha... wait.

I remember you telling me in the initial days that you had some girl in your teens. Am I right..?"

Seeing me blush, she got confirmed and was raising the excitement and playing the hands in air.

"Ok honey... I will. But assure me that, it shall never affect the future of our relationship...!

Promise me...!" I asked.

"You have my word darling." She said by posing as an idol.

"Hmm..." I sighed and taking my smart phone out of my pocket, I asked her to go and open my blog. Where; I have posted about my First Love in fair and clear.

She happily took the phone and I didn't know how to take her excitement. But I just smiled at her void to giving it.

She started reading and when someone is reading my works; I love to stare at their face expressions. As I get a live update on how they are feeling my penned works. It's just a feeling though. She began to read.

First Love:

Love, the magic which happens once in a life time. You may ask me, why once in a life time? There is something called "First Love".

"First love", a true feel with no ego's, no hatred, no nothing.... what all emerged in it is a true feel called LOVE.

Me, myself had a love story. There is a saying called "Love is blind". I don't know who said it or why the hell it was said.... But the way it was said resembles in some or others' Lives.

As per my concern, why it was said in that way means- None can say when can it happen, on whom it may happen, what for it may happen... Irrespective of caste, creed, colour, height, age, etc.., it just happens, only once... At this juncture you will dare for anything.

One more important thing is, "I do know that I am good for nothing". But my heart says to do something which is not intimated by my Brain. Whatever be the thing it is... You just feel to do... that's it.

If you come to know that it's the stupidest thing, which you have ever done... In that case, you would tell to yourself that "Good Job, dude....You have done something which other person shrinks to do or other person fails to do"

Whatever be the factor, you will make it into positive one.

"Shall I tell you some deeds in my first Love?" "Yes please." She said lovingly. So I listed them-

  * Listening to each others heartbeat by sitting hours together.

  * Holding one's arms, looking into eye and saying "I Love you sweet heart".

  * Catching the flying kisses, where it may fly and come.

  * Eating only half of my meal, leaving the rest half for her.

  * Enjoying the silence of her.

  * Pre planning the dress codes for the weekends.

  * Spontaneous reactions as per her seating during study hours.

  * Passing on the love letters without any fear.... damn blindly before teachers itself by folding them in a closed book.

  * Reading the same love letter by keeping it in between the Text books.

  * Creating Miss calls phobia for parents.

  * Going early to school and being late to home.

  * Enjoying the cycle rides together.

If I go on tell you in this way, there are many more Kinjal, I loved her in such a way that "I even would enjoy the silence of her". Every tear of her would create a tsunami in my eyes and earthquake in my heart.

You know I do remember each and every walk I had with her. Did you ever see, someone laughing with eyes. I saw it in her eyes

(Actually this dialogue was used in

"Yeto vellipoindhi manasu" Gautham Menon

movie, but she wrote this line in a love letter she gave me and I remember it very well.

"It's enough for a life time." I thought. I won a girl's heart in 54 days. It was like a "Life time achievement award" for me. Obviously, "My heart was jumping with joy."

It's almost like taking a ride with her on a Flying horse.

Love, anger, romance, sacrifice, kindness, sorrow, laughing... All types of emotions. If you have gone through all these, then I will bet you..... "You got a lesson for sure". If not, you didn't take up in the right way....

"Lots of happiness, lots of Love"

It was going swift.

Everything crashed in a few days.... 4 years Love, why the hell we broke up...??

I will tell you one thing, when a girl is in deep throat full of love with a boy, She doesn't care or consider... how many mistakes he does... because, she needs him in any way. She doesn't dare to lose him. I will agree, some girls give their Jaan (life).

But if once she loses faith or love on him.... "Even a small mistake by him would bring a drastic change in the Relation."

I don't say that, there is no mistake from my side.

Yes, there is.

Yes, there are.

Even I am a human.

I do mistakes.

But giving the chance of rectifying makes the real sense.

At the end of the day, I am all alone and the girl is planning for marriage.... That's the Wonder.

I, the Love Einstein...

Is really being so....

I believe in a saying which I saw in a movie....

"Whatever may happen, life goes on"

And I want to confess one thing for myself.... For instance, just imagine... These are my FACEBOOK Status updates.....

  * Parents searching for matches.

  * Roaming around Matrimony companies.

  * Match is being fixed.

  * Getting married.

After that.....??

Damn, I hardly know her....

Time span, seeing her face - 2 weeks.

"How the hell would I get laid with a person (Girl), whom I hardly know...?"

After marriage, there will be only bonding....

Love till the end..?

It's a myth.

I always do feel to marry a girl, whom I know very well (Or)

With whom I am fond of.

Expecting Love from a person for a life time is a damn foolish thing.

But,

"Loving, indeed is not impossible" It's the matter of heart.

One my friend says all the time that;

  * Don't take everything to heart.

  * On the contrary don't take everything to brain. Better know,

"Which matter should be dealt by whom...?"

Then life becomes easy. I thought.

Once upon a time,

"My eyes would always search for a girl..."

Knowing that she masked her Heart, so blindly... My eyes stopped searching for her....

I had such a Break up; either I said that my heart stopped beating 4 her by looking into her eyes or she did.

She will not even dare to....

That's Our LOVE....

First Love is First Love" I concluded.

"Beautiful. Really, it's beautiful Srujan. I loved

it."

"That's it Kinjal, that's was all it is. It will never disturb you, they are just memories. They are safe as a paper in my diary and even in my heart and brain. Never mind." I said.

Kinjal was speechless, she just kept calm for 4km. Tuned on the song from the Aux connected phone. It was "Love you for thousand years" by Christina Perry.

Wah...! What a song... I was singing and I was including the name Kinjal after every stanza.

Kinjal was all smiles with a grace on her face. "Oh...! My dear Love Einstein, when you know how to love. You should also know how to forget. Hope you did it. And now I am the one in your life, in-return you are the only one for me. Got it...? Better remember these and the kiss which I am going to give you now.

Stop the car aside." She said. Why not...? I rushed the car to the left.

She just dragged me to her, catching my hair so firmly... she kissed the upper lip and then the lower one. And just bit me on my neck at the end.

"Ouch...!" I grunted.

"Remember this also... Hope it will remind you." She said.

"For sure... I can take those marks as many as you wish to leave on my skin. Thanks in advance." I said.

"Don't you want to know my past?" Kinjal asked me.

"Aha...! I want, but I don't." I said.  
"Be clear idiot." She scolded in funny mode.

"If at all it can make any sense in erasing the bad from your past, you can tell me. I will listen. I want to know you but not your past. It is safe with you always. Keep it as it is." I said.

"This is why... I love you Srujan."

Umm... Baby...Her cheek ended up with ample kisses from me.

## Meeting of Present and Past

By the time we reached our college, it was 8:45AM. Almost every guy and my fellow students were going crazy after Kinjal. When we parked the car in the centre of our

College under the tree and getting out of the car was like a rock star entry. All of my buddies shouted my name in a rhythmic way. And I introduced her to my batch at first as my Friend. They understood very clearly but none dared to come up with what they think.

So, I was showing her our college by walking around. "So, what's the plan?" She asked.

"Plan...? For what...?" I asked again.

Don't kid with me right now, are you going to the exam or what?

"Hell yea. I am. Don't you worry; I am going to be back within an hour. I will finish off as soon as possible." I said.

"Ok. As you say." She said.

This is our library and this is the place where you are going to stay for an hour with my best buddies. As we walked into the Library, all of them were in utter shock. Even my HOD was sitting in the library. But he couldn't resist to open up his mouth. We are the final years and that's the power of a student.

I walked to the corner of the library, where ECE friends of mine were sitting. For the fortune of Kinjal, they are all girls.

I was about to introduce and leaving me shocked for a while; Kinjal ran to the group by shouting the name "Shravani..! Oh my god... you are here?"

They were screaming all the girl stuff. They were exchanging tears, smiles, F words, etc.., I couldn't close my ears instead got fucked up for a few minutes.

"Ok... Now let me guess...! You both were School friends...? Right...?" I asked with an eyebrow up expression.

"WTF...! How did you know honey?" Kinjal came to me with all the surprise on her face.

"Ha... Ha...! That was a blind hit. And fortunately I got promoted." I said.

"That's cool... and BTW this is Srujan, my... my... my...!" She stammered like hell. I don't know why.

But we were in a blush mode in an extreme high way that whole library shouted in a tribal way.

HOD... shouted. "What's happening?"

All of them rested in their places including us. HOD sir couldn't get a thing and he left to his place.

"Ok honey... now here is the deal. I am so happy that you girls know each other. I have a lab external to attend. It's getting late. You both take care. I will be back soon." I said.

"No problem Srujan..! Take your own time. Do well in the exam." She said.

I gave a determined look.

"Girls are girls." I said and left the library hall.

I entered into the examination hall. All of them were ready to pen down the theory part. And it was our Mechanics lecturer, he was the toughest and most respected in our college. No chance of copying even. I thought, I am so fucked for the day.

"May I come in sir?" I requested.

"No." he said.

That was the rudest response I ever got. "Excuse me sir, I am just 2minutes late. If you don't mind, can I come in?" I asked again.

"No." he says again.

My anger got no limits. It was the final year and this lecturer is messing with me. "What shall I do?" I thought.

"That's it. Guys... This lecturer is not letting me in. Is this the right thing?" I questioned with a loud voice.

"No...! Every one booed him on the spot."

"Excuse me sir, this is the last time I am asking. Shall I come in?" I asked with humbleness.

"No." He said again.

All of the guys from our batch were waiting for his rude answer.

That's it. Come on guys. Let's rock and roll. Let's boycott the exam. Every one rushed out with the answer sheet in hand, shouting for justice. And they made me stand in prime.

I was leading them to the Administration office. Because it was not the first time that professor has done it. Because of his strictness, many of our guys failed in the labs, who are still writing the supplementary exams.

"I don't want to be that guy." I said.

Every guy who failed in the lab exam due to the lecturer negligence came forward shouting for justice.

As were passing the library, all of them came outside. I saw Kinjal. She was laughing in happiness. I don't know... why.

Later on the Dean came down and apologized on behalf of the lecturer.

"Please go to the examination halls right now. Everything will be rectified for sure." He said.

Some of our guys were expecting News channels for our Boycott. But for their kind information, Our College is 60km away from the centre of the city. It's a day dream guys. Let's go to our desks and fill up the theory part and accomplish the practical in success.

Everything went swift. We did great.

I was walking to the library for Kinjal. It was around 12"O clock.

Someone tapped my shoulder from back, it was Shravani.

"Hey...! Where is Kinjal?" I asked.

"She is in the last room of the last floor. She asked you to come over there immediately." Shravani said and left smiling.

"Damn... what's happening?" I thought.

Hmm..! I had to rush for the washroom as my bladder was so tight.

I did my nature call thing and climbed for the last floor. Everything was so silent.

There was no one in the floor. I walked to the last room and opened the door. It was the hell of a bloody surprise; whole class was standing in the room with Cake in the middle and a lot of foam spray bottles. All of them shouted leaving me stunned at that place.

"Happy Anniversary..!" shouted the whole class.

Uff...! I was jumping and shouting. Kinjal came to me and gave a warm hug. All of the boys were starring with a wide open mouth. "But how did you convince all these guys?" I asked Kinjal.

"They came to me introducing themselves as your classmates. I got the idea when they said about you." She said.

"What..? What..? What did they say about me?" I questioned.

"Aha...! Don't tell him Kinjal. We got him here.

Now it's our time." Vijay shouted from back side.

"Uffooo... you guys are so dead in my hand." I said.

"Leave all of it now. Please cut the cake. I am hungry." said Vijay.

"Hmm... Come honey. It's time." I said. We cut the cake and had a blast in the class room.

All of them were trying to impress Kinjal by saying something good of me. And there were many lies in them also. I was laughing like hell.

And the day passed, Kinjal offered a lunch treat for all of them at once.

I was so shocked.

"It's going to cost a 2 month pocket money of mine." I thought.

All of them hailed our names. Ha Ha..! I was all smiles.

"So, let's meet at the dhaba in town." I said.

"Srujan... Why not in the city?

Are you worried about the money? She asked.

Although I know that; it was one of the factors. I said; "no honey... Many of them live here in the hostels. So, that's the best thing for their convenience. We will go by car but what about them? They should travel by bus. For a biryani who would travel to city? It will cost them more than that for sure." I conveyed my opinion.

We were done with the class and left to the parking area to start up. She took out the phone and was trying to someone.

"Who is it for?" I asked.

"Shravani..." She said, she will come with us. "Kewl. Wait I will call her." I said.

"Wait. So, you know her number?" Kinjal asked in surprise.

"Yes. Off course, she is my only best friend in Engineering." I said.

"Wow...! Really...!

That"s the mother of coincidence. She is even my best friend." She conveyed it very happily and asked me to request her to come down quickly.

I gave a call, she came down and we all had a nice lunch at dhaba. We reached city with a joy in our journey.

Since then, we often met as 3 members. We went for movies, resorts, plays, etc..,

It went on for another 6months in the same way. It was all jolly tenure. I was done with my graduation. I got job in the campus placement in GEM Corporation. It is a trading company with huge profits at present in market.

# Reality and Love

On the occasion of my Job placement, we had a big party. We got drunk on that day together in Shravani home as their parents went to village.

On that day, we had a discussion on Goals and Future plans. Shravani raised the topic.

Kinjal overtook the topic as it seemed quite interesting to us. We had Magic moments that night. It was all in a nashi. The chat was all fun.

"I want to write; Kinjal."

"Then write Na..! Who is stopping you?"

Kinjal said pointing her finger towards me.

But I want to help my parents also. I have many responsibilities on my shoulders as an elder son.

"Aha...!" she said.

"I should have gone to Germany for masters by this time. But things are tough in home. So I had to drop." I said.

"Germany? Masters? Why you never said this to me?" She grunted.

"Oh... I never took it serious to tell you. Leave it. It didn't work out anyway. See I am right here. Laying my legs in your lap and drinking with you." I said.

Such a night ah..! I love this day Srujan.

"Me too." Said me and Shravani together in a coincidence.

"Do you both speak with minds?" Kinjal gave a determined look.

"LOL. You are high." I said.

Yea yea.

"Srujan... Ask me what I want to become..!" Ha... What you want to become honey?

"I want to become a dentist." She said.

Ok... First clean my mouth and then go for others.

"Hey Srujan... there is something struck in between my teeth" said Shravani.

"Oh... Don't you worry! Our Kinjal is here." I said.

Shravani started laughing by rolling on the floor. I too joined her unintentionally. I didn't mean it. But it just happened as a situational joke.

"Crazy... idiots. I will not speak to you guys. I will leave right now. I am going to my home. See, I am on my feet. I feel like flying Srujan." She said and slipped down. Fell on the couch fortunately.

I got rushed to her. Even Shravani came crawling as she was also out of order. "Kinjal... what happen ma? Are you okay?" I asked.

Srujan... I can see your face as very large one and close to my eyes.

Come kiss me...! She held my jaws and dragged me to her.

A gentle kiss which was so passionate made my hormones ooze.

Shravani was right there, sitting beside us.

Ha Ha...! She felt so embarrassed. I asked her to bring some lemon juice. She went inside and brought a lemon. I looked at the lemon and Shravani a couple of times indigenously. She was all out for no doubt. I thought drinking with girls was an awesome and romantic thing ever. But it is the worst thing ever. I gave a taste of lemon to Kinjal by squeezing it directly into her mouth. She was hanging out the tongue with some critical expression for which I automatically laughed. Held her to have a sip of water and made her sleep on the same couch. I just sat over there, with her only holding her hand.

I asked Shravani to go and sleep in her room. She left to her room. I just slept on my knees by laying my head near her chest. She was all warm. The next morning I was feeling her fingers playing in my hair. It feels so good. Honey... I said. "Ha... dear. Tell me." She said. "I love you honey" She kissed my head in response. "Hmm... Tell me something na..!" I said. "Why didn't you sleep the on bed?" she asked.

"I felt to stay with you here in your arms all night. So, I did." I said, giving her a smile.

I crawled up into her bed-sheet and cuddling her made our bodies warm.

In the meanwhile, Shravani came walking like a zombie. I was murmuring in Kinjal ear that; see our zombie friend is coming to us.

Kinjal was laughing with a sweet creaky sound.

"Rey... Last night you slept on the couch ah..! But I saw you sleeping by kneeling on the floor and laying your head on her." Shravani said.

"Hm... You got a great lover Kinjal. He was with you only whole night. You were bolt with vodka last night. He gave you lemon I think." Shravani was telling and I was cuddling her more firmly telling "It's all for my girl." "Lucky both ah..!" Shravani winked.

We spent our time by watching T.V and cleaned all the room. Prepared breakfast and made our energy levels increase.

I and Kinjal left to our respective homes by that noon.

That was the day where we had to exchange our Facebook passwords. Sometimes, she used to be online from my one and I used to be online from her account. It's kind of a play she enacted for. But I literally got the point in it as every couple has in their relation. It is for our own security I thought.

###

### Reality threatens Love

I started blogging with an idea heard from my friend Phani. They named him sadist but he's got a heart. He gave me a boost up to create the blog and I did it.

I was getting some good reviews from my friends and other people also. That gave me the spirit to write more and more. In the meanwhile, I started writing poetry also.

After a few days, I wrote an article named **EPIC ARTICLE** which is penned below **.**

### Article:

A girl asked me once...

What do you boys think of girls in private..?

Billion way answered question.

And this one was asked so humorously after a long chat with her.

I was just dumb for a while and my chat box was popping up so badly.

The crazy part was,

"I just dared my ass off to reveal the truth to her."

Nonetheless, that even I was in the mind-set of flirting with her.

Luckiest part was... she was well aware of that thing ;)

I kept silent for a while and my humour was taunting me so bad that "I am going get laid to night."

Breaking the silence...

I just gave a sigh... "Tell me dear...I was on a call. Sorry for the delay"

"I'm on hold for answer" she replies.

"OK. Do you mind if I tell you a story..?" I replied. "Yep... Go ahead. But be brief" she pings.

What is the probability of a Girl looking at boy in a crowded market? You can say a 'couple of times' or aah...depends..!! We never know.

And if you ask about, what is the probability of boy looking at a girl in the same market? Now, that's a question which gets an **answer**.

1. If the girl gazes at-least once by mistake. Boy vigorously continues to get her attention. 2 .For instance, if she leaves a smile na..!!

He is going die with happiness and her footsteps shall be his pathway..!

The girl and the boy thing;

Technically speaking... its just **magnetism**.

Sorry...I promised you to tell you a story, right..?

OK. Come on.

This guy, Srujan.

For instance... think I'm itself him. So called; Srujan.

I was influenced by the opposite gender very much since my teens. In my school days,

  * I would move on and get ready for cycle rides with them.

  * Scratching the leg of beside sat girl, with my own leg.

  * Robbing a girl notebook and returning it to her itself by visiting her home, post school hours.

  * Being late to leave the class rooms in breaks to spend time.

  * Fighting with friend to sit beside her.

The stunning part was...

These all; happening before puberty period.

It may mean "stupidity" if I do think of these things now after puberty.

And it was all fine until the period of maturity. But post maturity. I've got drenched in the crowd of scum bags, pretty well.

I got into such a group... am telling you; if you are with them, you would have fun out and out. And if it's any lecture period/class... there is no answer in getting beaten up because of them.

That fun...

That sorrow...

I always had a positive impact on girl until and unless I got matured mentally.

The idiot who gave initiative voluntarily to spoil my impact/vision on a girl was Mr.

XYZ.

The only idiot friend of mine, who introduced porn to our school.

In the earlier days of 7th standard, I have seen some CD's being exchanged in between my friends.

I didn't bother about them much. But later on...On a calm and pleasant evening I was just walking down the lane and I heard a bicycle tyre skidding so badly... making that rusty sound when the rubber and sand goes on with fiction leaving out the dust to air.

I just gave a rapid head turn to see who it was. It was Mr. XYZ

He just asked me to get on back. We rode to his home directly without any halt.

To my surprise, all of my friends were over there itself. T.V was on, with some Hindi songs channel.

There was a fight for remote as usually. Then it rested in the hands of the superior one as expected.

Fingers pressed down on the buttons and eagerness in finding an English channel.

What it can be other than HBO and Star

Movies. The all-time favourites...!!

All of them were desperately waiting for the expected scene including me.

Out of nowhere... here comes Mr. ABC...sliding out the curtain with a book in his hand seemed so energetic.

I thought it was just a book. But proving me wrong, he opened the book and took out the C.D with the index finger in middle of it.

All of them were shuffling seating positions on a hurry note going to the front row.

XYZ points out that index finger of him towards me and says... "It's a new movie, wait for the surprise."

The CD was rolling in the C.D player and on the CRT screen here comes the picture.

No... That's a **Motion Picture**.... filled with nudity all over the screen.

That was my first time. Literally, I felt it as a big Sin.

After a while, I left to home.

I should tell you... It was rolling in front of my eyes like a 3-D movie.

Since then, I got analysing some girl in my own 3-D way.

I had many friends from the opposite gender as every guy from my school. But it happened only sometimes because I knew my limits.

But I have to say...

"Impact is Impact.

No matter good or bad."

Including me... I was successful in getting a girlfriend by the age of 14.

That's cool... Right..?

We used to meet in private as a group...

Itself..!!

You know there were times like guarding a couple for some cheeky naughty things for their pleasure.

Not to mention the names... I was guarding a cupid couple. Later on I saw someone coming by the main gate. I signalled them with a low profile whistle.

He was so quick... like,

He just came out of the classroom walking normally and shouting out my name... Srujan, Do you have the book or not...??

I was murmuring inside like...

''Em jeevisthnaav ra...!" (What an acting man..!)

He just came followed by laying his hand around my shoulder and dragged me for his speedy walk.

Which he always does....

After reaching down stairs, out of curiosity, my question was like... "What did you do? "He was blushing like anything... I took a lot of answers in random.

But I being a boy felt to know how that feels in the company of a woman? Or how it feels in a hug or something?

Idiot... recklessly said his whole act, the next day in a physics period. Because instead of sleeping we felt to be wise enough.

From that day; I heard many "Cupid Romance Stories". But Not "Sex" ah...!! Because it's a big task to even think of it. Age matters right...!!

But those little things made our day. There were nearly 5 to 8 love stories in our school. But today... none of those are on float. All of them are drowned in just a wash of tide called "Time". Some had disasters. Some even cry till date, thinking of that particular girl. When in relation; what all a boy thinks or concentrates on is the **Flesh** mostly. "Getting pleasure in leisure" was the hymn... all the time. That's all we have known at that time. We never even thought of good/bad thing. "Just did it". Sometimes, we got "ass kicked." Sometimes we got excused.

But that impact created a big loop in my career till some graduate level.

Trying for some wrong numbers in order to trap a girl by feigning love, was a famous trick of all times mainly in the past decade.

I did it.

I got lucky.

Many got it.

Many got lucky.

But there was No-Love in it.

Orkut was wholesale destiny to get in touch with new friends. But we made it a sex shop. Hunting for girls... sliding pics, etc., etc.

The active voice was telling me to be a good guy.

But the passive voice was haunting me to go for the opposite gender... To have fun or something...!!

But I should tell you.

For the question asked by her.

What do boys talk about girls?

I'll tell you.

At times, the things which my eyes saw, my ears listened and have got experienced many "Drunken parties."

When the 2 bottles or 3 pegs of whisky are emptied; the show starts.

1st guy: I have kissed my girlfriend.

2nd guy: That's it...??

1st guy: Who said? There's a lot more which I had done...!!

2nd guy: I am all ears. I will tell in my next chance.

1st guy: come on bro... Be a Man..!!

The discussion goes on.

We can hear the Real voices.

Real intentions.

Real personalities.

Finally... Unveiling a real demon which was hiding under mask called friendship/culture/society.

But my 1st love taught me some moral values.

And keeping the memories safe; to never let them fade away with the coming life breezes or passing clouds.

I just kept them safe beneath my soul.

Every guy has been with some girl at some moment.

If it's a mutual understanding. It's up-to you. Your wish. Your life.

Do whatever you feel like...Have sex or take selfies together. Whatever!

But what is the point in unveiling them in public...??

Some idiot takes the nude pictures while making love and uploads them on Net; post break up. Shame...!!

Remember... It's the freedom she gave you... idiot...!! That's her love... offering herself unto you in between four walls. Better **keep** that way.

Instead... we see headlines about suicides on the mask of blackmails.

And in the final days of my graduation; I was having some best friends among girls too.

We would buckle up for a ride. Go for a movie. Had some best moments of all time.

But in some conditions, the male in me would ask for something more.

I would kill that idea then and there itself. Unfortunately, once...I had conveyed it so badly that.

She just hung up the phone.

Never spoke to me again. Never saw me again.

She didn't dare to lose her self-respect.

And I am proud of her...!!

And I am ashamed of myself...!!

For many of us; the male in us may ask, to fill the thirst.

But friends should remain friends; in formal.

If you really do have feelings towards her; "Propose her..! Marry her..!"

But if you have some sex appeal;

"Bury it underneath brother." Undoubtedly, it can spoil the relation.

At prime, choose the type of relation.

Don't hang on to the word called Lust with every girl.

Get some clarity...!!

If not; ask me.

"Never make piracy of her privacy,

And keep up your legacy..!"

That's it.

-***END***-

When I heard the news that the article got published on that day morning edition in the writer's column and is getting some good reviews, as a happy feeling I gave an immediate call to Kinjal and asked her to come out.

We met near the bazaar and I said the news to her. She felt too happy for me seeing me happy.

"Let's eat" I said.

"Dokhla..?" She asked.

"What? I never saw the image of that food item to be nude." I said.

"Oh... Damn. You missed it. Having a Guajarati as partner and if you say someone that you never had dokhla Na... It's a shame on me." She said.

Come on. Let's go.

We had it. I loved it.

###

### Reflections of Past Love

Unexpectedly I heard someone knocking my door. I thought it was bobby but proving my senses wrong, it was Kinjal in-front of me.

"Why is home so silent? Where is aunty?" She asked.

I explained that my mom left to cousins home. She won't be back till evening. I'll ask you a few questions. Will you answer me?

Yes. Why not? You just ask me, I say.

"Who is the best friend from Epic Article?" she asked.

"Vidya, she is my school friend." I said.

But, she throws away the paper on to me... shouting; "Liar... Liar..!

It was Shravani, right? You, cheater.

Shameless."

"Oh... Let me explain Kinjal. Please. There is nothing like you think. I just felt it. So I conveyed it. I know it's wrong.

"Oh... That's so sweet of you Mr. Boyfriend. It's been two years with you and you've gone for a new girl in lust. Great..! Thank you..!" She said.

"Oh come on Kinjal. Anyway she never agreed for that right..! Didn't you read that from the article?" I asked.

Oh... It's Shravani. That's why she never agreed for it and she will never also. That's my girl. But what if there was some other girl in her place and she agreed for it? You would have gone for it right..! Wouldn't you? Moron..! Get out of my way... my life!

Get lost! Break up is the word of the day for you & me, because there is no more **us**. She said while leaving and while crossing my door, she turned back. I thought she changed her mind. But you know..! She didn't.

Srujan... You remember, a fine day you said something to me like; "We human never know whether we will be alive till the next morning or not but set the alarm and sleep." "Ha..! You were wrong about it.

That statement is applicable for a careless wreck like you for sure. But not for the one who feels responsible and loyal to his/her loved ones. A real human sets the alarm with a hope of living for their family and loved ones, to keep them safe, feed them and raise them." She said and was leaving me in the room of vacuum love. "Oh wait. Tell me one thing, how did you know it was Shravani..? Did she complain you about this?" I asked.

"Oh... Mr. Dumb Ass that was literally a blind hit.

Anyway over is over. Digging in the lust is a game for you guys. Goodbye." She said leaving walking away from me.

Every time when she drops me somewhere, our hands would wave with tears in eyes. But that day when I did yelled her name with tears in eyes, instead of a waving hand, her middle finger saluted me. Even she was in all tears.

With the shame of sexual desire on best friend and after getting caught to Kinjal, I didn't know what to do. I felt ashamed of doing so and I was speaking in mouth with the help of my heart as "I am sorry Kinjal, I let you down. I let the trust go away which never reverts back in the matter of love. But if it comes back to me walking again, I'll never break it."

I apologized to Shravani many times. But I never got a reply. Instead, she chose some options on me as below;

Facebook = Unfriend

WhatsApp = Blocked

Twitter = Unfollow

I apologized to Kinjal in all means. I even went to her the same day. Her brother almost had a fight with me, where her sister was all tears seeing me. But they knew my pain and pain of love.

He just pushed me to go away and never to come into their home and into her life.

I was walking away from her home. Everything is blank in my mind. Walking legs and crying eyes. Walking legs and crying eyes knew no path. Out of nowhere, Bobby skid the bike in front of me. I felt like a sudden shiver in my body.

"Nani... Get on the bike" He said.

I answered nothing instead Ignored him and resumed my walk.

He tapped my shoulder vigorously. I refused to turn to him even. He pushed me hard and shouted;

"OK..! Fuck off...! Go to hell. But at the end of the day, you should reach home only. Don't forget that. "If you do anything, I am going to kick your ass, even if you are lying as a dead body.

We lost a friend of us, remember Pavan..!

I don't want to lose another friend of mine. Please stop. He shouted and yelled. When he said; Pavan... my walk held a break as if ABS is fixed.

I turned back and rushed to him and punched him in the face. Don't you say that name or that word...! "Neither you will lose me, nor will I. "There was all silence for a while in between us. I just backed off from him. Staring at the sand, I stood over there for a while. "Sorry bobby...!" I said and knelt down crying the hell out. He just fell on to me and hugged me tight. He was shivering. It's his symptom in tension/distress/ sorrow. "Stop shaking idiot." I said.

Come on... let's go. We got on bike and our next destination was the bat

Until 3-pegs I was all OK. But after the completion of 4th peg; I was coming out slowly. And I started crying like a baby. Bobby didn't stop me. But said, "cry... cry... cry the gut off..!"

"Leave all the pain of sorrow, leave all the mistakes." "Just forgive yourself Srujan... Else you can't ask for forgiveness to her or anyone."

"Bobby... Did you love anyone? Sorry... Do you have a girl in your life? I mean for now, at present." I asked.

Probably, when in drunk even a small question is asked in a most typical way. Especially for me. My tongue doesn't move in proper when in drunk or have cold water.

He was laughing out loud for the way I was stammering to ask a question. "You know I am also in a relationship." he said.

"Wah... You tell me how you met your dream girl..! I don't need her name anyway" I said." Eh... No ma..!" He said blushing.

"OH... Bobby is blushing. If one more peg is lifted then the whole matter crawls out in flow." I said and mixed the peg uneven.

"Another peg..? Damn... To tell how a love blossomed there is no need of liquor brother.

But to tell a break-up it is as needed as a fuel for an engine. To let the pain flee. I'll tell without touching this peg. See... It's a challenge." He said.

"Yea done. Then I am happy. Play the disc." I said.

It was on Sankranti eve, when I discovered her on a beautiful evening. That sunset brought me a sunrise to my heart. Every guy gets a shot from some girl with her seductive and powerful eyes in a bullet speed. And that evening it was my turn to take the shot, directly into my eyes thereby dropping through neck and finally settling in heart. Literally, this is an often used dialogue/line but "I saw her somewhere". That glow on her face and that spark in her eyes, which looked so familiar to my memory. She was standing in line parallel to me in the ladies queue to buy the entry pass. But within a few minutes, I saw her doing something unusual where on the contrary, I got flashed a similar thing which was seen and experienced by me in childhood just like that.

"Really..? What was she doing exactly?" I asked.

"She was biting her nails and dropping them in the bag of the person standing before her." Bobby said.

"Eww... Really? What kind of habit is that?" I said with a weird look on my face.

"Hahaha..! Probably that's way weird, I know that. But I saw her doing it with my own eyes." He said.

"Uff... Nasty girls ah..!" I said.

"No brother. Beautiful girls. They look beautiful no matter what they do. I mean...

Some, not all.

Okay..! Now leave that dirty look on your face." He said.

"Ha ha..! Ok. Then what happened?" I asked.

I found her interesting and switched on my video camera and made her steps my way to turn her acts a memory safe in my eyes and as a video in my handy cam.

When I was walking in her route, she discovered some boy crying over there with a broken tooth in his hand. She rushed on to him asking what happened. He showed

His broken tooth in his hand with some blood on it in the midst of crying. She offered him water and asked him to goggle and spit out eventually. The little boy did it and

Then she asked him the broken tooth in return.

He gave it to her immediately and asked her "What will you do with it sister?"

"Aha..! You want to see..? Come here." She said and asked him to settle down on his knees as she did a little beside the tree.

I was curious to know what she is going to do. And then surprisingly she rigged a little wet sand out and buried the tooth underneath safe and clean.

"Why did you do so sister?" The boy asked.

Literally... the questions which were in my mind were being asked by the little boy itself.

"If you bury the broken tooth in the ground, it turns to gold after some years. If not you, someone will be benefited by it. From now on you also do the same. Be a good boy always." She said and left the place.

But when I was thinking, I got remembered that the same thing happened to me also in my childhood with a girl. I couldn't remember the girl name and face properly but the memory is true for sure.

I was feeling hungry by that time and I just went wandering for something which can satisfy my stomach and all of a sudden a friend of mine pulled me aside asking where exactly was I. By the time I convinced him that I'll be back in a while, I found that I missed the girl in the crowd.

Folding off the video cam, I searched here and there but in vain. My hunger was punching my stomach in all means. I saw a Chat bandar stall to the left corner. I just directed my walk to it and asked for 'pani-poori'. The guy who was there kept a paper cup in my hand.

"Pyaaz daalo bhayya..." I said.

"Paani nakko bhayya..." she said with a husky voice.

"What..? Panipoori without paani (water)...? Who eats so..?" I was questioning myself in doubt and weirdness.

I turned my head to the left and discovered the same girl who was showing her right side to me and requesting the stall keeper not to put the water.

On the spot I got remembered of a girl from my childhood.

### 6th class:

Me: Shall we eat panipoori?

Girl: Yes, we will.

Me: Bhayya, pyaaz daalo..!

Girl: Bhayya, paaninakko..!

Me: What? You don't want water in it?

Girl: Yes, health hazard it is. You should also try it.

Me: Not now. Please.

Girl: oh..! You have to take care of your health. Try it and you will get habituated.

Me: Ok Ok. But just with you.

That was in my 6th class. Is she the same girl..?" This was the same question running in my mind. I was just staring at her, to study her face cuts and all.

That evening ended up in a feel of love and the memory of her. If she is the same girl from my childhood, it would be so nice. I thought. But I never know how destiny brings up a thing and takes back it ruthlessly. In-fact I was worried.

The next day, I was sitting dull and playing the same video of her acts the before day. I was repeating the same thing. Sunny brother was watching me do it the whole night and leaving satires in all means from every corner he is standing. Vinay came to room and was shouting at me to get ready as it was Vamshi Birthday and we have to attend the treat.

Vinay: Its Vamshi birthday and he is coming with his fiancé also. Idiot, get up and fresh up as soon as possible.

Sunny: Our hero saw his heroine yesterday and he is playing the same video over and over.

Me: Oh..! I think it is her, the one from my childhood.

Vinay: What girl? What childhood?

Sunny: Ask him only.

Me: I can't tell you the story now. See this video.

Vinay: ok give it to me and by that time please freshen up. Didn't you bath? You stink idiot.

Me: Shut up... Who said so? I will now.

Vinay: Yuk..!

By that time I was back in a fresh mode. Vinay was all smiles at me.

Me: What happen?

Vinay: Nothing, you must be in love ah..!

Me: He He..! Shut up.

Sunny: Bobby... If she is your property, destiny will lead her to you.

I don't know whether it is true or not but that line sounded damn good to my ears.

We went to Bakers Inn and greeted Vamshi. In return he introduced his fiancé to us. Actually, Vamshi is 2years older than us. But he never shows that age difference. I was still dull and kept thinking of her only, my dream girl. In the mean while sunny and Vinay said the whole matter to Vamshi and her fiancé. I left a plastic smile onto them.

I was looking around, up and down, covering all the directions. Everything seemed special to me. All of a sudden, I heard a gang shouting and singing birthday greeting song to a girl diagonal to our table. For my utter fortune, when the birthday girl sat in her chair after cutting the cake, a girl left standing beside her appeared to me as a rainbow out of clouds. My heart was jumping in joy. I don't know what to do.

Oh shit..! What's happening... what to do now...! Each and every line as a question ran in my mind at a high speed.

I stamped the table with my fist in happiness and said; "Guys, that's the girl from my memory and past"

Vamshi' fiancé name is Radhika.

Radhika: Go and speak to her then.

Me: It doesn't make sense if I do so. I'll be remembered as a friend only if I really did that. Sunny did say something about destiny. I loved that line. Let it happen to me or I'll walk away alone and silent.

Sunny: Uff..! Everything has its time bobby. If you desperately need it to be done right now, where is the meaning of destiny here? What all I can see is, your wish.

Me: May be... But I have to tell this. There is one more weird habit of her which gives me an instant result for the answer; is it the same girl or not..!

Radhika: What is that?

Me: She has a habit of distributing cakes or chocolates for her best friend birthday.

Sunny: How can you be so sure?

Me: Because, I never distributed cakes or chocolates in my 6th and 7th standards.

Vinay: Hard luck ah..!

Me: May be. But not now..! Now if she does it. She is the girl and I am going to propose her in person and right here in front of everyone.

Vinay: Let's see.

Our whole table was watching their table. They were cutting the cake into pieces. They were placing them neatly in a plastic plate including some chocolates in a corner. While we were watching only, the birthday girl stood up with the plate in hand.

Seeing that, "oh no...!" I grunted and lied onto the table in front of me.

Sunny: Bobby... "10seconds before whom you thought is not yours is coming to you walking, to be yours" Get up man. See this.

Me: A glow lit on my face and all of my friends were looking at me only.

If she comes to our table, I would be the first one to take the cake. So, I asked Vinay to switch the seats with me, so to be the last one to take it from her with a plan in my mind.

Every step of her towards me raised my heartbeat enormously.

Finally, she did come to us.

"Excuse me, it's my friend birthday and she is busy spending her quality time with our friends. So, we are offering cakes. You can please accept it with a smile on your face." She said.

Vinay, Vamshi, Radhika, sunny... All of them were saying Thank you... Thank you. Everyone took it calm but sunny did something you know..?

Sunny: Thank you so much and your sweet name please..?

Girl: It's Shravani.

Sunny: Very nice name. Thank you.

Me: I stepped on his shoe so hard indicating that it's enough.

She moved the plate to me in the sequence. I looked at her once and I moved back my hand instant from the plate, even though it looked like I was taking the cake.

"Excuse me..! You can take as many as you wish. No problem. Please accept it." She said.

"I don't want to touch it but I want to eat it." I said.

"Ha..! Pardon..!" she said.

"Will you feed or shall I grab..?" I said it once again parallel to opening my mouth.

"Idiot..." She said and was walking away from me showing her back to me. I stood up immediately, Hello Ms. Shravani madam. Listen up... I never thought you would forget me.

  * You bet your nails and put in my bag.

  * You buried my teeth underneath in the sand.

  * You ate pani-poori without paani (water) and made me do it telling as health hazard.

  * You ate all my sweets, telling it's good for health.

Now, you are not even feeding me the cake.

Great..!

That day when you were leaving the school in 8th standard, you were right..!

We can recognize one with odd habits but never the one with even one.

See, I did recognize you. Destiny made me found you. In-fact, I never searched for you. But it showed me your habits before you. Now please turn back. And one more thing;

  * You asked me to tell something if we ever met in our life either in young age or in old age.

"What is it..?" She asked standing in the same manner.

  * If in old age it's; **I miss you.**

"Then what about now in this young age?" She asked in a shaking voice.

**"Ha... I Love You"** I said with all the tears dripping from the verge of eyelids.

At that moment, silence had the dominance. She turned to me, wiping her tears. I thought she would come directly running to me but she came walking to me slowly with that plate of cakes in hold.

"Aaa anu..!" she said.

("Open your mouth" she said)

As I did, she forcibly fed me 2cake pieces at once. As I was looking at her with a mouthful expression.

"Remember my name?" I asked.

"It used to be Bobby in those days. I don't know what it is now." She said.

We both exchanged heart-full smiles for a moment.

"If you keep that plate aside, there will be a chance of a hug or a kiss." I said low voice.

"Hug..! It's ok for now. But Kiss...? Not now. Let's see. Destiny has its role in our lives. Let it sail us through the waters to the shore." She said and hugging me tight in laughing tears.

All of them in the bakery applauded with some huge claps which we heard for a pretty long time. So, in that way, our love blossomed in a bakery, which invited us in single and sent us out as pair. We love it.

That's it Srujan. Give my peg now.

"Awesome bobby, such a nice love story ah..! But didn't you feel it a bit cinematic?" I said.

"Ha Ha Ha..! Yes, even I keep wondering about it. I never tell it to anyone thinking of the same question in return." He said.

"Leave it man. I am sorry." I said.

No problem. Happens. You know. This bar is to be remembered for two things;

  * Your break up

  * My patch up

He said and kept laughing but I started crying.

Bobby, you know...Literally for the first time and only for once... I am feeling bad thinking why I changed her mind-set from destiny to reality. I mean it.

"Whatever Srujan..! Destiny or reality... No need of discussion, once the ship is sunken. Get out of it." Said bobby.

**7** th **Peg**

Vodka... was so amazing.

"It can make you do anything... even break your own head."

The next day I had a massive head ache, by the time I woke up.

I was in sunny room.

"Why am I here?" I asked.

"Ask vodka" He said in sarcastic mode.

"Oh... shit..! Why am I having such a massive swell on my skull?" I asked. "Ask Vodka", he said again in the same mode.

"Come on man... tell me." I said feeling exhausted.

"Last night you hit your head to my bike head light in an enormous way telling that it is your opponent head in the boxing ring.

Ah..! That's all a big mess... Don't ask me...!" Bobby said.

Just go home, it's already 10AM.

"Oh... fuck, I am so dead." I thought and left his room.

It was Sunday actually and by the time I reached home, all of them left to church.

Aah..! I felt relaxed.

I had my bath and finished my breakfast. The day passed somehow.

The very next day; Monday... I went to office and asked for a sick leave faking that I had to undergo a surgery.

I worked it out by producing some fake medical documents.

I configured to the office that the treatment is in Kerala.

I was desperately in need of a break from place and life.

I went to Kerala...

I took a room for rent.

Ajith was the only friend I ever had in Kerala.

Soon in a few days, I lost concentration and focus on my life.

I got habituated to Weed at ease.

Boozing in leisure and smoking at times was the only work I ever had. My beard was pretty cool.

I spent moving all over the state. I saw rich... poor... middle class.

Beautifully built churches and temples. I loved the canals and boat houses.

The most shocking moment was, when I asked for a tea... He gave me a big glass of it. That was my second visit to Kerala. But I didn't have tea in my first visit.

The nights in weed were pretty awesome. I kept writing in all moods as poetry.

#Dew weed...!

Those nights, when I sat up tight on an empty stair case...

Smoking a Joint of nude-weed, ignoring that dry cough and wet floor.

Nothing stopped me from smoking it.

At the same time...

The odds were on my side; hitting me to have it more and more.

I was polluting the air... with a polluted heart and polluted mind..!!

It was like doing my part in tearing out the ozone layer, wishing that harmful sunlight to hit on the ground, to kill the declined,

Hatred,

Soul-less and me in certain.

The clothes on me were absorbing the smoke out of a lit rolled joint... to make me dizzy, even more in a wrap.

I didn't get a grip on my soul which was asking me, to loosen-up the grip of the filter held in between my fingers.

Instead, haunt to emulate it and enact.

The dried throat reminds me of a famine.

It's more dried up than a lost one's in an empty desert.

Gazing at the sky;

With head leaned to the floor, the beauty of stars in the darkness, take turn into an illusion.

Just drives you to a new galaxy.

Asking you to open up,

Shout louder the name of the one,

Engraved on your heart.

Cry out loads in the memoir of your lost one.

Just that smile, tipping up the happiness in you.

The eyes be wet, missing that glory... it used to have.

The star in the sky is named as Star by this greedy human.

Just ignore it...!!

Name the same star after your loved ones,

Missing one's and lost ones.

Watch it daily, call it daily,

Talk to it daily.

Shout your throat nerves out....

I miss you as I loved you

And

I do...!!

The smoke is never going to reach the star and the star is never going to miss your sight...!!

This deceptive world always reminds you to Behave.

But Weed is wise enough, which murmurs in your ears to be-you.

Just do what you like,

The real happiness comes from an act of kindness.

Smoke hard, die hard...!!

One night,

One drag,

One life...!!

# Getting out..!

The sands are calling you, the waters are sailing you...!

Go for a play in sand, go for a swim in water...!

The empty heart is looking for a soul in, the dark night is looking for the soul to break in...!

Every heart got to beat, every nights got to heat...!

The play of clay was memory, the game of dragonflies was memory,

All the memories of play times are of nostalgia...!

Presence of absence is illusion, just take a resolution...!

The blood is to be pumped in heart, the flood is to be washed in eyes...!

Fingers be shaken, heart be broken...!

Glimpse of her walk made me lose me...!

The gravity did work the gravity did work...!

I am back to her, I am into her...!

Getting out of her is getting out of me...!

# With Love..!

I love the moon in the sky,

I love the clouds in the sky,

I love the stars in the sky, I love the way we stared at the sky.

Which, always made us feel to fly, now in return makes me feel to cry. I miss that feel to fly.

One day, I will make you fly into the sky and never let you go

#### Reality without Love

It has been nearly one and a half month coming to this place. While coming I bought nothing with me except my notes and pens along with the luggage.

On one side; I was flooded with calls from bobby, on the other hand calls from daddy and mommy. Ultimate pressure from my office. Text messages from my sister.

What made me move was; my need to the see family.

It made me think not twice but it made me wise. I booked my ticket to Hyderabad. In the meanwhile, I took care of all the works I can through online which belonged to the office. I neither remembered Kinjal, nor forgot her.

All of my friends were sending some consoling messages like;

Break ups are normal bro, cheer up.

_Be a man and go get another_.

Oh... god. Many, many and many.

Two days passed and it was time for departure to Hyderabad. I flew safe and clean to my hometown, Hyderabad. From the very next day, it was back to life with no love nothing, everything is gone. If it would be back, it would have reached me by this time. But it didn't. So it will never.

I fixed myself mentally. My parents welcomed me warmly when I was home. No matter what, whatever place you travel; Home is always home. I felt good that night. I slept very peacefully. I read the bible. I prayed with joining hands and knelled knees. No dreams, nothing. Peace at peaks.

The very next morning, I saw my mom sitting beside me. She just moved my head to her lap. "You know, a lap is a cradle of getting rid of sorrow and pain. I love you beta (son).

She said. "Me too mom" I said.

"Forget her nani... It's her hard luck.

You're not this. It's eating you. Either spit it out or let it digest in the time lap." She said. I kept listening her.

The day went on by keeping me just in home in-front of TV. The same night bobby gave a call to me saying;

"Srujan... I have to tell you something. Can we meet..?" "Yes... Of course. I'll be at Cafe. Come soon." I said.

I went on driving dad bike. For a time of ten minutes, I had to wait and well, he was there.

"Hey man..!" He gives me a tight hug. Bobby: How are you Srujan?"

Me: I am fine bobby. How about you?

Bobby: I am fine. Thank you.

Me: So, what is it you want to talk to me?

Bobby: Yea. It is about my girlfriend.

Me: Oh..! Now, don't tell me you had a break up ah..! Please, I can't bear.

Bobby: Ha Ha..! Not so but I almost had it because of your Epic Article.

Me: Wait... What? Because of that article? What are you talking?

Bobby: Ha..! Yes... I am honest with you always right..!

Me: Fortunately, Yes. But how is my article related to your love story?

Bobby: Your best friend from the article is my girlfriend.

Me: Oh...! Mother of co-incidence. Literally, you're not kidding me right..?

Bobby: Nope. I'm not.

Me: Oh..! Shit..! I am sorry bobby. Really, it just happened.

Bobby: Oh..! Come on Srujan... I know you na..! Anyway I didn't come here to accept your apologies. I came here to tell that I and Shravani are getting married soon. Our parents accepted our love proposal in our homes.

Me: Damn..! I am so happy for you bro. Please convey my hearty apologies to Shravani. I tried a lot but in vain.

Bobby: No problem. I handled it already.

Me: What? Really? How did you know that it was Shravani? Kinjal would have never said to anyone. Shravani neither. Who said to you?

Bobby: Yea. I know. It's you.

Me: What? Really? When is that?

Bobby: That one drunken night made us vomit all the things. I remembered you spelling Shravani name many times and being sorry for her. When I asked you, you said she is of your college. I never said you about my relation with her thinking it may spread out in your college. And I neither know that you both are best friends since a long time. Neither I asked her about you nor did she tell about you.

Me: Oh..! Damn..! Then how did she react about it? Did you ask her about this?

Bobby: Yep. I went that day evening to her. I hit a blind stone on her. "Shravani, are you the girl from epic article?" "Article...? What article..?" She said.

"Come on Shravani... I know you when you're lying. It's bad to see you this way." I said.

"Ugh... Yes bobby..! That was me. I have known Srujan since the past 6years. It's just the age. Our young blood..! He just conveyed it though. Please leave this bobby. I don't want to erase the good in Srujan by making it public. It increases the hatred on me in him. That's the reason... I never let this matter out. It's zipped and almost forgotten." She said.

"And how did you know about this..?" She asked in amusement and shock.

"Answer is Srujan..! I know him since my teen age." Shravani understands the whole matter in a panorama click.

"OK. How is he? I mean Srujan." She asked.

"He is fucked up literally. I couldn't see him in that way." I said.

"Why..?

What happened?" Shravani asked.

"It's LOVE" I said.

"Love..?" Shravani gets terribly shocked.

"Why..?

When..?

Oh..! What happen in between Srujan and Kinjal?" she asked.

"Wait... How do you know about Kinjal ..?" Bobby enters the cage of utter shock.

"Umm... I've known Kinjal since a very long time." She said.

"Uff..! Till the last second I was like WTH..!

But now...

It's WTF..!" I said.

"Ha... ha... ha..!

Don't get involved. You will hang yourself..!" she said.

"That's how it ended and tell me Srujan.

What's next..? Are you planning any move towards Kinjal?"

"Nope... Nothing. I don't know. Leave it bro. From tomorrow a new life, I think." I said.

"Never lose the hope bro" she said.

"When it's hopeless... building up the hope is stupid" I said and the topic ended calm and clean.

We left to our homes with a warm hug telling each other; "Take care"

###

### A Magic

After the break up, I spent my life recklessly much like common lover struggling to forget and move on. One fine day however, I decided I needed to get back into the real world. Back to the office and work I convinced myself that everything was quite happy and that I was fine.

There was a new colleague at the office, so there was a welcome party and everyone did their best to make her feel welcomed. She asked me about my Facebook profile name and almost immediately sent me a request. Before leaving for her cabin, she reminded me to respond. This actually reminded me that I had a Facebook account because I hadn't used it for about two months. Anyway, I tried to log in but each time it came back as, "Incorrect password". Of course this made me irritated because even though I had not used it for a while, I knew my password. Then it dawned on me like a ton of bricks, "Kinjal!"

"Did she change it?" I shouted with shock and doubt, because really I was not sure but at the same time that was the only logical explanation. So I took my car keys and walked out of the office with due permission to take two hours from the manager. By this time, I was fuming with anger. "Why did she change my Facebook password? How dare she did it?" These were the only questions which were running in my mind and coming out of my mouth. All of a sudden, I got reminded that even I knew her Facebook password. So I brought the car to a very harsh stop and tried to log into her account with the password I knew but in vain. "Everything is ruined and now she wants to play with my personal life...?" I shouted whilst taking out my anger on the steering wheel by banging it.

I hit the gas pedal and made the trip to her flat, a destination I knew so well that it was as if my brain went on auto-pilot to find it. I was so upset, I could not even get the elevator to work which made me even more upset! Going up the stairs was no easy task either.

"What the fuck am I smoking...?" I am unable to climb even these steps for god sake.

I rang her door bell and got no response so I knocked the door rapidly. I was bloody frustrated.

But when she came and opened the door, I froze happened to me only god knows but I was damn silent. Like the first time I saw her, I was bowled over by her beauty, it melted my heart. She didn't question me, nor did she slam the door on my face. Instead, she welcomed me in.

"Who is it?" her father shouts.

"Friend dad...!" she shouts.

We stood there, looking at each other and the silence in the room was as thick as a wall. She saw that I was sweating like hell and so she turned the A/C on. This helped to relax me and she went into the kitchen and came out with a tray (Glass of water and some sweets).

She placed them on the Table and said; "Have it".

"Thank you" I replied by drinking water.

With utter satisfaction and relaxation, I asked;

"Why sweets?"

"Sweets... ah___!" she stammered.

"Wait, are you getting married? How the hell can you! It's just been a couple of months.

That's it." I said angrily.

"You girls Na...!" I murmured again and I would not give her a chance to speak.

"Stop it." She shouted.

"They are just sweets. Sweets are not only meant for marriages but also for birthdays." She said, sounding exhausted and determined.

"Oh... shit." I thought, but I proceeded to say,

"Ok... whatever, did you change my password?" I asked her, the anger being evident in my face, which made her break down.

"Yes, I did the very next day of our break up. I expected you to knock on my door the very next day. But it took you two months" She said with a sad face and tears in her eyes.

"I...." At this time, I stammered because I simply did not know what to say

.

"I am sorry" I completed with much difficulty and got up from the chair I didn't know what to say, so I figured it may just be best to leave

"Don't you dare? Enough is enough. It's been two months." She spat at me angrily "No call or nothing! What the hell did you think? I would marry another one and name the child born after you...!" she said.

"My name...?" I stammered again.

"Yea... bloody name. God must be crazy. He made me meet you and I don't know where he is now when I am all alone missing you." She said wiping the tears on her cheek.

"Kinjal.... Please. I am sorry. I thought it's all over. It took me two months to feel close to normal again. This is my first day to my office after two months of sick leave." I said in an agitated voice.

"Sick leave...? What happened to you? Were you drinking out that bloody whisky whole time?" She slapped me hard without any hesitation and cried loudly.

That slap on my right cheek, stunned me and at the same time, I felt ashamed that I did not recognize her love all these agonizing weeks and that I did not even try to contact her once.

I dragged her into me and hugged her so tightly that all the sorrow from us got evaporated that second.

"Sorry honey. I will never make you fall apart, or hurt you I'll walk with you to the ages." I murmured in her ear.

In the mean while her dad was hearing the conversation, but he did not interrupt, he only stood back to the curtain, but I could clearly see him. He was patiently waiting to see the magic of love and he did.

Kinjal and I got married the very next year without any regrets.

The Facebook password did all the magic.

This was the end of the sorrow in our life and a welcome card for a new beginning. We were the only couple who made a meaning for the reason behind exchanging of passwords as per my concern.

"Anything can happen anytime" is all we have learned from our own story.

After a long time Shravani called us. She seldom visits us; as we are long away from her place. However, she did come and by that time Bobby was in our place only.

Shravani questioned us about the clarity in between the destiny and reality; which made her think a while about the answer she got from Kinjal.

"We don't know about the destiny or reality. What all we knew was "To love and to forgive". If not that day, the other day... Srujan would have definitely come to me and knock my door. Because, I changed all his social media and email account passwords..." Kinjal replied and Shravani gave a head turn to me; to see the look of shock on my face.

Up to that point, I didn't know because Kinjal didn't open up about that, she had kept that ZIPPED this whole time.

Of course, Shravani was laughing like hell along with Bobby.

"You know, the pillow fight begins?" She said and in that moment all I could say was

Oh...Kinjal..!

### Epilogue

Bobby: What kind of love is this?

Me: This is love of generation, take it as an updated version.

As generations change, the way of loving alters in all senses. In-fact, this novel is a love of generation. Use of social media or technology doesn't make it so, but rather how truly you love is what all matters.

Love in generation is expressed in two ways;

(a) A love of generation which is gained by worldly pleasures and ends up as vanity.  
(b) A love of generation which is gained by the soul, indeed in all the senses and keeps growing due to loyalty.

In our story, we did nothing to make our love a Gem in the shell, except to love and love..! (A present continuous tense is always good for a relationship as it signifies a state of being)

### Author

**I P Tarun** , born and grown up in Hyderabad, India has always loved writing articles, stories and poetry. It is no surprise then that at only 22 years old, he has taken the challenge to pen the love story of one of his colleague, whilst adding his own flavour which is inspired by poetry.

He is an avid believer in the power of love, a philosophy that over the years, has lost popularity in contemporary world, where so many people get distracted with mundane things, greed, alcoholism and divisions along religious and caste lines.

I P Tarun believes that the power of love is able to inspire solutions for every problem and he hopes to inspire you, the reader to remember how powerful love can be. He believes in **containment** and **infotainment.** Where philosophy is engraved with entertainment to save some souls.

The best way to contact him is

puchakayalatarun@gmail.com

Facebook Page: **I P Tarun**

I don't know why

But

Thank you _Vinay_.

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