

## The Shrew Untamed

### An unorthodox sequel to

### The Taming of the Shrew

By James Carter

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Smashwords Edition

Text - James Carter - copyright 2008

Cover art - Bonnie Van De Ven - copyright 2008

All rights reserved. No part of this book shall be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, magnetic, photographic including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior written permission from the author.

The author can be contacted at olympusworld@gmail.com

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Dedicated to Doreen, Freda, Desmond and George.

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The author is indebted to the following writers:

Mary Wollstonecraft

John Stuart Mill

Plato

William Shakespeare

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## Cast of Characters

Petruchio ~ A merchant from Verona

Kate ~ Wife to Petruchio

Grumio ~ Page to Petruchio

Bianca ~ Sister to Kate

Lucentio ~ A merchant from Pisa

Tranio ~ Page to Lucentio

Gabrielle ~ A merchant from Milan

Andrea ~ A politician from Rome

Maria ~ Wife to Gabrielle

Cupid ~ Angel of Love

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## ACT 1

### Scene 1: The road from Verona to Pisa: Morning

_Set design:_ The backdrop is a glorious view over the sun baked fields of Italy. In the center of the arena is a road-sign that bears the names "Verona" (with an associated arrow pointing in one direction) and "Pisa" (with an associated arrow pointing in the opposite direction). A tree stump rests near the stage edge.

_Note:_ the horses and mules that appear in this play are represented by broomsticks with carved animal heads attached.

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The curtains open as PETRUCHIO rides into view atop his trusty stallion. He is headed towards Pisa and has a small satchel strapped to his back.

PETRUCHIO

(Singing)

Come live with me, and be my love,

And I'll show you the world from up above.

The two of us will sail up high,

We'll dance and swoop across the sky.

The dapper Italian whistles his tune as he dismounts in the center of the stage, removes his satchel and extracts a blanket from it. Petruchio bursts into song once more as he spreads the blanket out on the stage floor and dances a jig around it.

If you will show me that you care,

I'll take you spinning through the air.

We'll make a bed atop a cloud,

And... I need a word to rhyme with cloud.

Shroud, proud, loud, oh forget it!

For once we're there we'll have some fun,

Making love beneath the sun!

The world below will hear your sighs,

And stare in wonder at the skies.

KATE rides into view upon her horse. The beautiful woman is engrossed in a book that she is reading, and she does not notice when her husband removes his cap and bows his head in a gentlemanly manner.

PETRUCHIO

Fair lady - you will pass me by if you continue to bury your eyes amidst those pages.

Kate looks up from her book and smiles at her companion as she brings her horse to a halt.

KATE

Petruchio!

Petruchio extends a welcoming hand to his wife.

PETRUCHIO

Upon this ground I have now spread;

A cloth for you to rest your head.

Come sit my love in this fresh air;

And gaze upon the valley fair...

Kate laughs at the silly rhyme as she dismounts, then allows her husband to kiss her hand.

KATE

Petruchio...

PETRUCHIO

Kate...

KATE

Would you care to know a little about the book that I am reading?

Petruchio pulls a ghastly face as he seats himself on the blanket.

PETRUCHIO

Alas my love, your reading tastes have always struck me as somewhat dry. I will pass.

KATE

Somewhat dry! Scholars regard this work as a monumental triumph.

Petruchio chuckles at his wife's expression of mock outrage.

PETRUCHIO

No book that is well regarded by scholars can be entertaining or useful. If you read aloud from its pages my mind will drift away with the breeze, only to return when the cover has been closed.

Kate drops her book to the ground and folds her arms in a stubborn manner.

KATE

I believe that I can share a certain tale from this book in a manner that will hold your attention. Are you interested in placing a bet?

PETRUCHIO

The usual my love?

KATE

I don't see why not.

PETRUCHIO

If I so much as yawn then you must concede defeat and offer your lips to mine.

Kate beams in delight as she strides over to a nearby tree stump and steps onto it.

KATE

My darling husband, I have five questions to ask you. For every question you answer correctly, I will remove an article of clothing of your choice.

Petruchio laughs heartily at the offer and rises to his knees with enthusiasm evident in his face.

PETRUCHIO

Madam, you play unfair!

Kate spins around on the remains of the tree trunk.

KATE

Absolutely any article of clothing you desire, as I stand here in full view on this stump.

PETRUCHIO

And how am I to know if you are being honest in your assessment of my answers?

KATE

Because dear man, the weather is warm, I am hot, and the removal of certain garments would be a welcome relief. I have no incentive to cheat.

PETRUCHIO

Very well: you may proceed with your interrogation.

KATE

Imagine an underground chamber with a long entrance open to the daylight. In this chamber are beings who have been prisoners there since they were children, their legs and necks fastened so that they can only look straight ahead. Some way off a fire is burning, and between the fire and the prisoners rests a curtain-wall.

PETRUCHIO

I see.

KATE

Imagine further that there are beings carrying all sorts of gear behind the curtain-wall, so that shadows are projected upon it.

PETRUCHIO

An odd picture and an odd chamber.

KATE

Tell me, do you think our prisoners can see anything of themselves or their fellows except the shadows thrown by the fire on the curtain wall opposite them?

PETRUCHIO

I shall answer no. How can they see anything but the shadows if they are prevented from moving their heads?

KATE

Nicely said. Name the article of clothing.

Petruchio laughs as he rubs his hands together.

PETRUCHIO

Show me your lovely left foot by removing its shoe.

Kate obliges and kicks her left shoe to the grassy ground.

KATE

You could have asked for the dress. Perhaps you are a gentleman after-all.

PETRUCHIO

I will never profess to be a gentleman! I simply appreciate that restraint is everything in this sort of game.

KATE

My second question to you sir: would these prisoners assume that the shadows they see are in fact real objects?

PETRUCHIO

Undoubtedly so: the shadows are the only reality they know. You may remove your other shoe now.

Kate laughs at her husband's impatience.

KATE

I have not yet indicated if your answer is correct.

PETRUCHIO

Lovely lady, even Grumio could have answered that question correctly. And I know him to be a simpleton.

Kate kicks off her remaining shoe as she shakes her head from side to side.

KATE

I am making this too easy for you. My next question will be a tougher nut to crack. Suppose a female prisoner was freed and compelled to walk, first towards the fire, and secondly, out of the cave all together. What change would come over her?

PETRUCHIO

My love, reality as she knows it would be transformed. For the first time in her life she would start to see things as they truly are. The process would be at once painful and wonderful.

Kate puts her hands on her hips and frowns at her partner.

KATE

I suspect that you have read my book before.

PETRUCHIO

Perish the thought madam! I think reading is a vile habit.

KATE

But you have been known to open one or two books in your life.

PETRUCHIO

Yes, when I was a young and misguided boy. But then I discovered that I already knew everything worth knowing. Goddess, remove that right hand glove of yours if you will be so kind.

Kate removes the glove in question and gingerly drops it to the ground as she resumes her questioning.

KATE

My fourth question: what to your mind is the central premise of the cave tale?

PETRUCHIO

Ah: we get to the heart of the matter. The tale indicates that the capacity for insight is innate in each person's mind. But to obtain that insight the mind as a whole must be turned away from the world of shadows until its eye can bear to look straight at reality.

KATE

Confess you lying rogue – you have read my book!

PETRUCHIO

I will admit to no such thing. Now kindly remove that left hand glove of yours this instant!

Kate laughs as she pulls off her glove and dangles it in the air for an extended period of time.

KATE

My final question: what would happen to our newly enlightened being if she returned into the cave and sought to share her insights with the cave prisoners?

PETRUCHIO

No cave prisoner will want to entertain the notion that they are ignorant and small minded. So they will ridicule your enlightened character, and perhaps even admonish or ignore her.

Kate claps in delight and then holds her right hand out expectantly.

KATE

An admirable effort: my gold coin if you please.

PETRUCHIO

I beg your pardon?

KATE

I have imparted a tale from my book and you participated in the lesson with robust vigor.

PETRUCHIO

Madam, you race ahead of yourself! You must first remove your dress!

Kate places her hands on her hips and pretends to be scandalized by her husband's command.

KATE

I will do no such thing. I am standing on a stump near a road!

PETRUCHIO

The payment of your coin will not be forth coming then.

KATE

As I suspected.

Petruchio laughs as Kate steps off the stump, gathers her clothing and sits down on the blanket. At this point GRUMIO rides into view atop his mule. Strapped to the page's body is a mountainous backpack.

PETRUCHIO

(Aloud)

Grumio - as jubilant and timely as ever!

Kate gently raps Petruchio over the knee with her book before turning to look at the page.

KATE

Grumio, I would be grateful if you would perform two services for your lady. Ride my horse to the home of my sister in Pisa and inform her that we will be calling upon her shortly. You must then make your way to the nearest establishment and drink to our safe journey.

Petruchio is genuinely shocked by his wife's orders.

PETRUCHIO

Madam, he shall do no such thing!

Kate immediately raps Petruchio over the knee again, only this time he yells out in pain.

KATE

Your friend is in need of some rest and revelry.

PETRUCHIO

Rest and revelry are two words that do not belong in the same sentence. Kate, I fear for your horse's limbs - Grumio is apt to be reckless with such a creature.

KATE

Grumio will treat my horse as he would treat a lady.

PETRUCHIO

Well now I fear for the animal's very life!

KATE

Grumio - be off.

GRUMIO

My lady, I will humbly oblige.

Grumio dismounts from his mule with an enormous grin on his face and hobbles across the stage. He mounts Kate's horse and rides off, leaving Petruchio to shake his head in genuine disgust.

PETRUCHIO

Madam, I must protest.

Kate starts to put her gloves and shoes back on.

KATE

If you must then you must.

PETRUCHIO

One should always display a unified front before servants.

KATE

Such advice has merit. But one should also look to bestow small kindnesses upon those closest to home.

PETRUCHIO

Ah, but madam - what of kindness to your horse?

KATE

Grumio will feel the brunt of my tongue if my horse encounters harm, and knowing this he will take care.

PETRUCHIO

Famous last words! Pray tell: who is to ride Grumio's mule into town?

KATE

Why sir, I volunteer my husband for such a task.

Petruchio roars with laughter.

PETRUCHIO

Your husband is either a remarkably kind man or a fool.

KATE

If you say so sir.

Petruchio jumps to his feet and gives Kate a hand up. He then folds up the blanket, packs it in his satchel and re-straps the bag to his back. Kate mounts Petruchio's impressive horse as he mounts Grumio's mule.

PETRUCHIO

Madam - one straw more and this poor beast's back will break.

KATE

Would you care to place a wager on that?

PETRUCHIO

Perhaps not: I do not wish to indulge your gambling habit.

KATE

HA! Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I will see you in Pisa!

Kate winks at her husband and gallops away from view.

PETRUCHIO

(Aloud)

Madam! I have decided that your husband is most definitely a fool!

The curtains close as Petruchio struggles to get his page's mule to take a step forward.

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### Scene 2: A drinking house in Pisa: Mid morning

_Set design:_ The drinking house sports the quintessential features of Italian architecture: terracotta colored walls, stone archways and tiled floors. In the background are 4 tables where the establishment's patrons are seated. Closer to the stage center is a bench covered in wine bottles and mugs.

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GABRIELLE and ANDREA sit in the middle of the drinking house and watch a waitress walk past them with a bottle of wine in her hands. Gabrielle whistles to express his approval of her figure, and promptly sets the other patrons off on a round of cat calls.

GABRIELLE

What would life be without a woman in sight?

ANDREA

I believe you are now drunk.

GABRIELLE

I am not drunk.

ANDREA

Indeed, you are. No sober man would find that waitress attractive.

GABRIELLE

Andrea, you would not know a woman from a horse. I on the other hand am an expert in female features.

ANDREA

Oh?

GABRIELLE

I have studied women with precision. If given the opportunity by God I would be able to create the perfect female without a second thought.

Gabrielle stands up and makes his way into an open area. Then, to the accompaniment of a silly tune and a ridiculous dance, he lays forth his views on the ideal female.

GABRIELLE

Hear me my friend, if God granted my creative wish...

(Singing)

I'd make her bounce,

In her blouse so trim and neat.

I'd make her sway,

As she walks down the street.

I'd make her dress,

In a revealing little gown.

I'd make her flirt,

As she glides through the town.

The other drinking house patrons cheer and whistle loudly as Andrea jumps up and stomps into an open area on the stage floor.

ANDREA

Hear me my friend, if God granted me your creative wish...

(Singing)

I'd make her sing,

Like a bird in the wild.

I'd make her laugh,

Like a happy little child.

I'd make her cook,

Like my mama back at home.

I'd make her sew,

Like my tailor down in Rome.

Gabrielle can barely contain his contempt for Andrea's stance.

GABRIELLE

(Singing)

HA! I'd make her wiggle,

In a dress made from lace.

I'd make her pout,

As she drops by my place.

I'd make her smile,

In a spicy kind of way.

I'd make her tease,

As men beg her to stay...

Andrea marches up to his friend and pokes him in the chest.

ANDREA

(Singing)

You describe a whore,

And not a woman sublime!

A simple piece of action,

To casually pass the time.

But I desire more,

For my domesticated queen.

I need a helper,

Who will wash, cook and clean...

Gabrielle throws his hands in the air as the drinking house patrons clap enthusiastically.

GABRIELLE & ANDREA

(Singing in unison)

Let's compromise,

And agree what to say.

We want angels in the kitchen,

And whores in the hay!

Let's have it all,

We're sure that's allowed.

Sing it from the roof tops,

Confess and be proud.

We want it all!

We want it all!

We want it all!

GABRIELLE

Agreed?

ANDREA

I like it!

The tipsy friends move back to their seats just as LUCENTIO walks into the drinking house. The handsome Italian merchant is surprised to see the two gents before his eyes.

LUCENTIO

I don't believe it! But it must be... Gabrielle and Andrea!

The two loud-mouthed singers look in Lucentio's direction and recognize the trader. They both stand up and before long Lucentio is hugging the men enthusiastically.

LUCENTIO

Andrea - my old friend, resplendent in your politician's robe. How goes it with you? And Gabrielle, I trust you are well.

GABRIELLE

Indeed I am.

ANDREA

You must sit with us.

The three sit down at the table that Andrea and Gabrielle have made their own. Andrea quickly pours a mug of wine for the recently arrived gentleman.

LUCENTIO

(To Andrea)

And tell me - how does Rome treat you?

ANDREA

Rome is pleasant, and my wife is very happy to live there.

LUCENTIO

And how long will you stay with us in fair Pisa?

ANDREA

We are visiting my parents: they expressed a desire to see their grandchildren. I imagine we will be here until the full moon.

LUCENTIO

Ah - the man is a father! Congratulations. And Gabrielle - what brings you back to the city of your birth?

GABRIELLE

I have come to show my mother her grandchild.

LUCENTIO

God smiles upon you.

GABRIELLE

Have you any children my friend?

Lucentio's happy face immediately turns sour.

LUCENTIO

Unfortunately, no.

GABRIELLE

Ah - you are not married.

LUCENTIO

I am indeed married, to a woman named Bianca.

Gabrielle suddenly becomes very animated.

GABRIELLE

I know of a Bianca! A beauty unsurpassed. I first laid eyes upon her while traveling through Padua. And then I had the unfortunate experience of crossing her older sister's path: a wretched shrew if ever there was one.

LUCENTIO

You talk of my wife, and my wife's sister.

Gabrielle's mouth falls open in embarrassment.

GABRIELLE

I apologize unreservedly sir. I spoke of your family in a callous manner.

Lucentio can only laugh at his friend's mortified facial expression.

LUCENTIO

You have caused no offence my friend.

ANDREA

May I ask how long you have been married?

LUCENTIO

My wife and I have been living under the same roof for over a year.

GABRIELLE

For over a year! And no child! My good friend - the apothecary can solve your woes. He will present you with powders to enhance your virility and soothe your wife's aching head.

Andrea and Gabrielle burst out laughing at the joke, then cut their chuckles short as Lucentio springs to his feet and pulls his dagger into the air. For a moment it looks like the merchant will attack Gabrielle, then the stern expression on his face gives way to a mischievous smile.

LUCENTIO

Do tell Gabrielle: how is it that you know the apothecary can provide such powders? Do you visit him often for his assistance?

Andrea bursts out laughing again as Gabrielle rises to his feet indignantly.

GABRIELLE

I have no need for powders! My advances are to my wife what rain is to a desert flower.

LUCENTIO

Infrequent and insufficient?

GABRIELLE

No! Life-giving and sweeter than honey!

Lucentio roars with delight as he slips his dagger back in its belt holster.

ANDREA

You put the finest peacock to shame Gabrielle.

Gabrielle's pride has been seriously wounded, and the stern Italian glares at his friends with a hurt facial expression.

GABRIELLE

Both of you are invited to call upon my mother's house before I depart for Milan. You will see first hand the adulation that my wife bestows upon me.

ANDREA

I expect to see her run from the house with open arms.

GABRIELLE

Mark my words little man, you will.

LUCENTIO

My friend, I have an errand to attend to now, but I will stop by your mother's house this evening. Until we meet again, adieu.

ANDREA

Good bye Lucentio.

GABRIELLE

Powders I say. He's off to buy powders Andrea!

The curtains close on the scene.

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### Scene 3: Bianca's drawing room: Midday

_Set design:_ The domain of a self obsessed woman appears before the audience. Against the walls rest several portraits of Bianca in various classical poses. There is even a miniature bust of her placed atop a marble pillar. Furnishings include a dress mannequin, a comfortable sofa, an elegant mirror, and a small table where a couple may eat together.

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The curtains open to reveal BIANCA standing before her mirror in an elegant dress, the hem of which is being pinned up by TRANIO. The page works diligently away while Bianca admires herself.

BIANCA

Tranio, the hem line must be flawless.

TRANIO

Yes, my lady.

BIANCA

I live with terrible imperfections in my life: a less than perfect home, a far from perfect husband. This dress must be the exception.

TRANIO

Yes, my lady.

Bianca looks down at her servant and pauses for a brief moment.

BIANCA

I assume you wish to marry one day.

TRANIO

I do my lady.

BIANCA

I understand: after all, a man is nothing without a woman.

TRANIO

Indeed.

BIANCA

Take my advice Tranio: if you want a happy marriage ensure that you dress your wife well. A woman is nothing without decent clothes, and if a woman is nothing then her husband will amount to even less.

TRANIO

Well spoken my lady.

LUCENTIO suddenly strides into the arena with a stern expression etched into his face. He paces up and down briefly, never once taking his eyes off his wife.

LUCENTIO

Tranio, leave us!

Bianca spins around and looks at her husband in a cold fury.

BIANCA

Can you not see that the page is assisting me?

LUCENTIO

And I wish to speak to you alone.

Tranio stands up and beats a hasty retreat from the stage while Bianca folds her arms and impatiently taps her right foot on the floor.

BIANCA

Well?

LUCENTIO

Today by chance I happened to meet two friends from by gone days. One is a successful merchant, the other a politician.

BIANCA

This tale has a point to it?

LUCENTIO

Indeed it does. Both are content men. Their wives care for them as they should. They have children to carry forward their family names.

Bianca rolls her eyes to the heavens and turns to face her mirror once more.

BIANCA

You bore me Lucentio.

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

And you compromise my position with your insolence! Why must I return home to a wife offering no kisses, perfumed food or heirs apparent? A man such as myself should feel no shame in sitting down amongst friends and discussing the subject of family.

Bianca raises her nose into the air as she takes a few steps towards her furious husband.

BIANCA

(Aloud)

Tranio! Tranio!

TRANIO

(Off stage)

I come my lady...

Tranio bounds into view a few moments later.

TRANIO

You called...

BIANCA

Your master has returned home from a hard morning of labor. See to it that he receives a kiss and a perfumed meal.

Tranio makes no effort to hide his bewilderment.

TRANIO

A kiss my lady!

BIANCA

A kiss. I would ask you to also provide him with an heir, but a woman knows better than to bestow such a task to a man, even one as competent as you are.

TRANIO

My lady, I do not follow.

Lucentio's mood suddenly lifts, and he emits a forced laugh.

LUCENTIO

Tranio - she stings like a bee does she not? But like all bees, in stinging she shortens her own life. You may leave.

Tranio breathes a palpable sigh of relief, bows to his master and exits from the room. A pregnant pause follows as Lucentio and Bianca eye one another carefully.

Kiss me Bianca.

Bianca's face crumples with annoyance as she looks away.

Kiss me!

Lucentio unbuttons his shirt slowly with an expression on his face that puts the fear of God into Bianca.

BIANCA

I am not a pudding into which you dip your spoon when the urge takes you!

Bianca strides up to her dining table and grabs a knife as Lucentio throws his shirt to the ground. The lady of the house holds the cutting instrument up in a defensive position, but looks so ridiculous that Lucentio cannot help but laugh.

LUCENTIO

The city would pay to watch this performance.

BIANCA

How dare you mock me!

Lucentio stops laughing and takes an ominous step forward.

LUCENTIO

I do not like your tone of voice.

Bianca darts behind her sofa to place a barrier between herself and her husband.

BIANCA

Be advised: when I stab I will aim for a certain fleshy part of your body with no bone to speak of. Ask yourself Lucentio: "just how badly do I want children?"

Lucentio takes a step backwards and shakes his head: it looks like he has decided to back down. Then suddenly he leaps forward and jumps onto the sofa. Bianca screams in fright and dashes off stage, her husband in hot pursuit.

Almost immediately a familiar voice punctures the scene.

PETRUCHIO

(Off stage)

Hello the house!

Lucentio quickly runs back into view and scoops his shirt up.

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

Tranio! See to the front door!

TRANIO

(Off stage)

Yes my lord!

Lucentio puts his shirt on rapidly and almost makes it offstage again before PETRUCHIO and KATE appear. The merchant is stunned to see his relatives.

PETRUCHIO

Ah! Lucentio – it has been too long!

LUCENTIO

Petruchio! This is indeed a surprise.

Petruchio steps up to his brother-in-law, grabs him in a bear hug and thumps his back with a roar. He then stands to one side and gestures to Kate.

PETRUCHIO

You remember your sister-in-law of course.

Lucentio bows before his wife's sister.

LUCENTIO

My lady... To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?

PETRUCHIO

We are traveling to Rome and thought it courteous to stop by and greet our relatives.

LUCENTIO

I am thankful you thought of us. But you might have sent your page forward so that we could prepare for your arrival.

PETRUCHIO

Grumio is not here then?

LUCENTIO

Indeed sir, he is not. Nor has he ever been here.

Lucentio's response sends Petruchio into a rage.

PETRUCHIO

The incompetent dope! Performance of the simplest task overwhelms him. I will box his ears when I see him next!

KATE

You box his ears once a day and no change is brought about by the practice. Leave him be.

Petruchio scowls at his wife and then lets the matter rest.

PETRUCHIO

(To Lucentio)

I would like very much for you to show me your town Lucentio. Perhaps we will find my page during our walk.

LUCENTIO

It will be my pleasure.

Bianca suddenly strides onto the stage and walks up to Kate with a beaming smile on her face.

BIANCA

I heard my sister's voice and was never happier to hear it.

The two sisters embrace briefly.

KATE

I am overjoyed to see you Bianca.

Petruchio takes a bow before his sister-in-law but is completely ignored.

PETRUCHIO

My lady...

With reinforcements close to hand Bianca steps up to her husband and slaps him across the cheek, much to everyone else's surprise.

BIANCA

Tonight I will sleep in a guest room alongside my sister. Only a lunatic would dare take on the two of us.

Lucentio can barely contain his hurt and embarrassment.

LUCENTIO

Bianca, this is no way to behave in front of guests!

BIANCA

These people are family, so there is no need to feign pleasantries!

KATE

I fear we have arrived at an inconvenient time.

BIANCA

Oh do not mind such behavior my darling Kate. I slap my husband the way a parent slaps a naughty child. It may not be pleasant to see but it is necessary. You must be hungry. Tranio!

PETRUCHIO

He is seeing to our horses my lady.

BIANCA

Of course: Kate, you will join me in the kitchen?

KATE

I will follow you shortly.

BIANCA

As you see fit.

The lady of the house walks briskly from view, leaving Lucentio to repair the unfavorable impression she has left behind.

LUCENTIO

Allow me to apologize for my wife's behavior.

PETRUCHIO

There is no need to apologize my friend. Kate and I have witnessed far worse in our lifetimes.

LUCENTIO

I will see to your room myself. Please excuse me.

Lucentio bolts from the arena. No sooner is he gone from view when Petruchio tilts his head back and laughs gleefully.

PETRUCHIO

Splendid! We shall certainly be amused during our stay.

KATE

I do not find my sister's violent outbursts amusing.

Petruchio slips a hand into a breast pocket and extracts a gold coin.

PETRUCHIO

We must entertain you then with something that is more to your liking. I propose a wager.

Kate studies her husband with interest as he holds the gold coin aloft.

KATE

You have my attention.

PETRUCHIO

My lovely wife: can you bring about a reconciliation between your sister and her husband within 3 days?

Kate laughs in delight.

KATE

And you have the nerve to declare that I suffer from a gambling addiction!

PETRUCHIO

You will not take part in the wager?

KATE

I said nothing of the sort! This woman never turns down gold!

PETRUCHIO

Bravo!

KATE

I require some clarification though. By "reconciliation" do you mean that they must come to love and respect one another?

PETRUCHIO

I do indeed.

KATE

I am no magician. I cannot make a man and woman love one another if the seed for that love does not lie in their hearts. And "respect" is perhaps an even mightier challenge, for it resides in the head and is therefore less fickle.

PETRUCHIO

Very well: within 3 days can you convince your sister to treat Lucentio with courtesy?

KATE

Perhaps I should be convincing Lucentio to treat Bianca with courtesy.

PETRUCHIO

Either way my love, you must bury the apparent bitterness between them.

KATE

And what must I give you if I fail?

PETRUCHIO

I will settle for a kiss.

KATE

Let no one accuse you of being predictable Petruchio.

PETRUCHIO

You think I should choose differently madam?

Kate ponders this question for a moment and then smiles.

KATE

Allow me to choose your reward. But I will keep its nature a secret and will only disclose the relevant details in the unlikely event that I lose.

PETRUCHIO

How can I refuse?

KATE

How indeed?

PETRUCHIO

My love, let the game begin!

Petruchio returns his gold coin to his breast pocket. He offers Kate his arm, which she accepts, and the two exit the stage together.

The curtains close.

*^*^*^*^*^*

## ACT 2

### Scene 4: Pisa town square: Early afternoon

_Set design:_ A cluster of villa facades sit in the background while a courtyard fountain bubbles and trickles away near the center of the communal village space.

*^*^*

A beautiful woman carries a pail through the town square. She is MARIA, and she makes her way to the fountain. The lovely lady rests her bucket on the edge of the water feature and gazes at her reflection as a somber tune permeates the air.

MARIA

(Singing)

Ever since I was a little girl,

I thought marriage would be divine.

Now I'm older, and what can I say?

I don't want to speak a silly line.

It's not what I thought it was meant to be,

Now I hunger to be alone, to be set free.

But in this world it's hard to run away,

To start anew bears a price I cannot pay.

Maria walks to the stage edge and lets her voice rise above the audience.

Ever since I was a little girl,

I dreamed of a prince who would be mine.

Now I'm wiser, and what do I know?

Princes turn to frogs and lose their shine.

My husband's not what I think he should be,

And how I hate what he's doing to me.

But in this world it's hard to change a man,

To make a difference, succeed in a plan.

What must I do? What must I do?

Be unhappy, be sad and be blue?

Or should I fight to have my say?

Struggle and argue for my way?

I have to choose, I must decide,

Before I lose every ounce of my pride.

Pick a course, and follow through,

To find a world that is mine, that is new.

Oh hear me now... I'm tired of the tears,

I'm done with crying, done with my fears.

I'll take no more, I've had enough!

It's time to be strong, time to be tough!

Just watch this space and you will see,

This day is mine, I claim it for me.

I claim it for me, I claim it for me.

This day is mine and I claim it for me...

Maria dashes back to the fountain edge, picks up her bucket and retreats across the stage to a villa doorway. She slips through the opening and out of view just as GABRIELLE and ANDREA stagger into the arena. Both men are unsteady on their feet, and when they speak they slur their words just a touch.

GABRIELLE

Ah: we have arrived at my mother's home my friend.

ANDREA

And where is the gushing wife?

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

Maria! Come and greet your husband! Maria!

A few moments later Maria emerges on the balcony of the villa she disappeared into. The young woman is clearly furious with the commotion her husband is creating.

MARIA

Gabrielle, you are no angel! You have been drinking I see.

GABRIELLE

Open the door woman and let me in.

MARIA

I have warned you that I will NOT be bossed about by a rude drunk.

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

Open the door now!

Maria retreats indoors briefly and then reappears holding a bundle of clothes in her hands. She throws these over the railing to the street below.

GABRIELLE

Are those my clothes?

MARIA

Your observational skills are a marvel.

GABRIELLE

Woman! You are treading on dangerous ground!

Maria rolls up her sleeves as a defiant tune starts to play.

MARIA

(Singing)

You come home late, with a lousy excuse,

And you subject me to your verbal abuse.

I've had enough, and I'll take no more,

Tonight you'll be sleeping on the floor!

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

Open the door, open the door, open the door!

MARIA

(Singing)

This is not the first time, as I recollect,

That you have not shown me any respect.

I've had enough, and I'll take no more,

Tonight you'll be sleeping on the floor!

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

Open the door, open the door, open the door!

MARIA

(Singing)

You should know, that I bear a grudge,

And from my position I will not budge.

I've had enough, and I'll take no more,

Tonight you'll be sleeping on the floor!

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

Open the door, open the door, open the door!

Maria retreats back into the villa as Andrea bursts into laughter.

ANDREA

I came, I saw, and I will admit: the adulation that your wife bestows upon you is truly remarkable to behold.

The mockery only exacerbates Gabrielle's anger.

GABRIELLE

You laugh, but this is nothing short of a coup! Mark my words: I will not be cowed by a woman! Not today, not ever! Andrea, follow me: we must summon reinforcements at once.

ANDREA

We are off to a battle then?

GABRIELLE

Indeed! And this square shall be the front line.

The curtains close as the two men stagger off the stage.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 5: Bianca's kitchen: Early afternoon

_Set design:_ Salamis, garlic, vegetables, fruit and bread: all are in abundant supply within the home's most important room. In the background sits a fire heath and shelving for a multitude of pots and pans. Near the center of the arena is a coat stand with a cloak draped over it.

*^*^*

The curtains open to reveal BIANCA hard at work beside her kitchen table. The angry woman puts the finishing touches to a rudimentary face that she has carved into a pumpkin. The lady of the house then scoops up the vegetable, strides over to the coat stand and impales the hollow shell onto the top of it. The stand now resembles a scarecrow. Satisfied with her work, Bianca reaches into the coat and extracts a sword. She steps back from her creation with the shimmering blade, and goes about flexing the weapon. KATE walks into the kitchen moments later and watches her sister's bizarre behavior with alarm.

KATE

First you strike your husband. Do you now plan to murder the scarecrow?

Bianca looks at Kate with a venomous expression on her face, then returns her gaze to the scarecrow.

BIANCA

This is just a rehearsal my dear sister. Now tell me: should I aim for the neck, the chest, the stomach or the groin?

KATE

You will find the chest difficult to penetrate.

BIANCA

Very well: the neck, the stomach or the groin?

Kate walks up to the scarecrow and examines him more closely.

KATE

The answer to that question depends on your objective. Do you desire a death filled with excruciating pain or is your aim a clean and swift kill?

BIANCA

Excruciating pain has more appeal I think.

KATE

Then you must aim for the stomach or the groin.

BIANCA

I thought as much. I do wonder though Kate: is it possible to emasculate a man without killing him?

Kate peeps inside the scarecrow's coat briefly.

KATE

In this particular case there is not much to cut off. I believe the scarecrow will survive as a eunuch.

Bianca's resentment fades away momentarily, and she lowers her sword in a state of dismay.

BIANCA

I do not joke Kate. Lucentio tries to make me the instrument of an animal function contrary to my inclinations. At times I find it impossible not to loathe him.

Kate steps up closer to her sister and holds out her right hand.

KATE

May I have the sword?

BIANCA

Why?

KATE

I would feel safer if we placed it away before talking openly with one another.

BIANCA

I have no reason to stab you.

KATE

That may change.

Bianca relinquishes the sword to her sister before folding her arms and looking out across the audience. Kate places the sword inside the scarecrow's coat and focuses her attentions on the matter at hand.

KATE

I am sorry to hear that Lucentio imposes himself upon you.

Bianca throws her arms into the air and starts pacing up and down along the front edge of the stage.

BIANCA

Kate, you have not heard the half of it! I am confined to a cage like a bird. If I leave I can take nothing with me. And if he chooses he can compel me to return by law or by physical force. Only a court decree would entitle me to live apart from him, and they are only granted on the rarest of occasions.

KATE

So you are in a predicament. But will stabbing your husband rectify the matter?

Bianca stops in her tracks and places her hands on her hips.

BIANCA

How can it not?

Kate laughs at her sister's earnestness.

KATE

I hope you jest.

BIANCA

I can scarcely believe you are my sister!

KATE

And I can scarcely believe you are mine.

BIANCA

Where is the Kate who despised the very sight of all men? The Kate who wanted nothing except to be left alone to her own devices, just as I do?

KATE

That Kate passed away shortly after her marriage.

Kate's remark leaves Bianca looking visibly confused.

BIANCA

Passed away?

KATE

Indeed. It was suicide!

Bianca gives up trying to understand her sister's enigmatic language, and studies Kate with a scowl on her face.

BIANCA

Are you really as content as you appear to be?

KATE

I am as content as I can be.

BIANCA

Our husbands must be different creatures then.

KATE

They are not as different as you imagine.

BIANCA

I do not believe you.

KATE

Bianca, I have worked for my happiness. And I continue to work for my happiness every day.

BIANCA

I do not follow you.

KATE

I work as a sculptor: from morning to sunset, seven days a week.

BIANCA

What do you sculpt?

KATE

I chisel away at the granite block that swept me away from father's home.

Frustration takes hold of Bianca and she has to restrain herself from screaming.

BIANCA

Once again, I do not follow you!

KATE

Bianca, I speak in a figurative sense. The granite block is my husband, and I shape him into a worthy and decent man with artistic precision.

BIANCA

You shape your husband?

KATE

I use the tools at my disposal: namely my wit, my charms, and my body. And I adhere to 3 golden rules in virtually all interactions. Without them I would be no better off than you are. Indeed, knowing my husband's former ways as I do, I might be worse off.

A pregnant pause follows as Bianca tries to digest everything she has just heard.

BIANCA

And what is the first golden rule?

KATE

The first rule is simply this: whenever your husband demands or requests something, ask for something in return. This is the art of negotiation. By practicing it you will attain outcomes that are mutually beneficial.

BIANCA

And what do you ask for?

KATE

I always request books.

Bianca allows her mouth to fall open.

BIANCA

I beg your pardon?

KATE

I have nothing of my own except my mind. So I devote my time to developing it, and I accomplish this by reading philosophical books.

BIANCA

You never ask for gold, or clothes, or jewels?

KATE

If I receive any of those things I exchange them for books filled with ideas. Why hold onto material goods when they can be re-possessed by my husband whenever he chooses?

Bianca struggles to wipe away the ghastly expression on her face.

BIANCA

Very well: what is your second rule?

KATE

Reward good behavior. Men are deeply fond of pleasure, and will change their most stubborn habits over time if you dangle the proverbial carrot before their eyes.

BIANCA

In other words, make a prostitute of yourself!

Kate laughs gently at her sister's outrage.

KATE

You needn't bestow your rewards in the bedroom Bianca. Use your imagination. And act with care, for a reward that is tasted every day soon ceases to hold value.

BIANCA

And in what ways do you reward Petruchio?

KATE

I write him love letters, I laugh at his jokes, I flirt with him and I compliment him.

Bianca places a hand over her stomach and grimaces in an exaggerated manner.

BIANCA

Be still my churning stomach! And what is your final rule?

KATE

Exercise patience. An artist does not create a masterpiece over night. And a man is not tamed in the time that it takes you to wash your hair. Experience has taught me that this is the most difficult rule to implement.

Bianca walks up to the scarecrow, extracts the sword from the folds of its cloak and then holds the killing instrument up in the air.

BIANCA

End the suffering now Kate! Just kill your husband!

Kate laughs at her sister's serious demeanor.

KATE

I have traveled too far my sister. I will do no such thing.

BIANCA

I haven't the patience or the stomach for your tactics.

KATE

I beg of you: allow me to demonstrate the effectiveness of my approach. What does Lucentio desire of you?

BIANCA

A perfumed meal, a kiss and a child, or so I have been told.

KATE

Well, I see no reason why we cannot prepare him a perfumed meal this very day. You will see: the simple act of presenting him with a dish when he does not expect such kindness will have a noticeable effect on his demeanor.

BIANCA

I will call Tranio then.

KATE

And why is Tranio of importance to our plan?

BIANCA

He is an excellent cook.

KATE

My darling sister, you have failed to grasp an important point. The meal must be prepared by your own hands.

Yet again Bianca's face registers mortification.

BIANCA

But I do not cook.

KATE

That will change. You must have a herb garden outside.

BIANCA

We do.

KATE

Then follow me, and learn a thing or two about artistry.

Bianca glances at the audience as Kate walks offstage.

BIANCA

I pray her lunacy does not run in the family.

The curtains close as Bianca strides after her sister.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 6: A drinking house in Pisa: Mid afternoon

_Set design:_ As per Scene 2.

*^*^*

GABRIELLE and ANDREA stride into Pisa's main drinking house. 8 patrons are seated in the establishment, merrily drinking away. Gabrielle mounts one of the tables in the arena.

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

My fellow men: I ask for your help.

DRINKER

What is your trouble good sir?

GABRIELLE

My mother's home has been possessed by the most wretched of creatures!

DRINKER

You mean the tax collector?

ANDREA

No: he means his own wife! She will not let him enter his mother's domain and claims that he must sleep on the street for being drunk, late and inconsiderate.

The drinking house patrons burst out laughing.

DRINKER

Are you the man of the house, or a lamb in a gent's clothing?

Gabrielle is visibly stung by the insult.

GABRIELLE

So you will laugh at my misfortune will you? And refrain from providing support? Fools! Do you think you are immune from my predicament?

DRINKER

But naturally, for we know how to handle our wives!

GABRIELLE

Listen to me: no man can escape female deception. Heed my warning.

The drinking house patrons erupt into a chorus of whistles just as LUCENTIO and PETRUCHIO stride into the arena. Lucentio is alarmed to see his childhood friend standing on a bench.

LUCENTIO

Gabrielle! Why are you standing atop that table? Have you lost your senses?

GABRIELLE

I have not lost my senses sir!

ANDREA

In fact, he has lost access to his mother's home.

LUCENTIO

I beg your pardon?

DRINKER

Locked out by his wife good sir, for being a bad little boy!

The establishment patrons erupt into another bout of laughter while Lucentio struggles to comprehend the news.

LUCENTIO

Your wife has banished you from your own mother's home? This very morning you led me to believe you were happily married.

GABRIELLE

Ah, but I have been grievously deceived, have I not Andrea?

ANDREA

If you say so.

GABRIELLE

Lucentio, will you serve in my army? I require men to commandeer my mother's villa.

Lucentio's facial expression betrays his mortification.

LUCENTIO

I beg your forgiveness my friend, but I must entertain my guest.

Gabrielle suddenly seems on the verge of tears.

GABRIELLE

Never has a man been so completely forsaken: first by his wife, and then by the members of his own team! I hope that all of you may one day taste the bitter fruit I now eat.

The forlorn man jumps to the floor and strides out of the drinking house with Andrea at his heels. For his part Petruchio seems most amused with the proceedings.

PETRUCHIO

Does this town have a season for domestic warfare?

LUCENTIO

It seems that way sir. I know you must think badly of us.

PETRUCHIO

I do not Lucentio, for I understand that marriage is no easy undertaking.

The two men take a seat at a table while a waitress places two mugs of wine before them.

LUCENTIO

I will confess that I am relieved to hear of my friend's woes.

PETRUCHIO

Then he is not your friend.

LUCENTIO

You misunderstand: I am simply relieved that I am not the only man to be tormented by his wife.

PETRUCHIO

Aha.

LUCENTIO

I will drink to that...

The two men lift their wine mugs and tap them together.

The stage lights dim rapidly, plunging the arena into darkness. Moments later the lights rise up again, but now a hysterical Lucentio kneels before his brother-in-law and clasps his hands tightly.

LUCENTIO

Help me Petruchio!

A tipsy Petruchio struggles to focus his eyes, and his voice betrays a level of intoxication.

PETRUCHIO

You desire more wine? Waitress....

LUCENTIO

No! No more wine!

PETRUCHIO

Then how can I be of service?

LUCENTIO

Petruchio, I am married to a shrew!

PETRUCHIO

I am sorry to hear that.

LUCENTIO

Bianca's beauty conceals a cold and unforgiving spirit. She loves no one but herself... She only smiles when she looks into the mirror... She berates, and fights, and sulks and plots... I fear I may return home one day to find myself locked out on the street.

PETRUCHIO

The scandal would destroy your name!

LUCENTIO

Petruchio, I look to you for guidance. You married a woman whom many were afraid to even approach, and I thought you a fool at the time. But I see your logic now... You entered your marriage under no illusions, and knowing Kate as you did you were able to tame her.

PETRUCHIO

Yes! Father always said: "marry the woman who is an open book".

LUCENTIO

I received no such advice. I purchased a well sealed book promising poetry and delights to the reader. And upon returning home I found the pages to be eaten through by moths and termites. No vistas composed of words, no sketches to excite the imagination - only mould. I beg of you Petruchio: share your wisdom with me. How may I change my wife for the better?

Petruchio stands up and struts around the stage as he speaks. Lucentio meanwhile rises and seats himself on the bench left vacant by his brother-in-law.

PETRUCHIO

My friend, I married a creature with a tempestuous temperament. And we fought the way stray cats fight over a saucer of milk. But I looked upon the matter with a clear head and then modified my perception of the woman. I decided to regard Kate as a lump of clay that needed to be fashioned into a useful and pleasing vase.

LUCENTIO

And how did you go about shaping your lump of clay?

PETRUCHIO

I knew that in order to win the war between our wills I would have to arm myself with a strategy.

LUCENTIO

Of course!

PETRUCHIO

So I became a "living mirror". A shrewish woman who beholds herself in a living mirror cannot fail to change her ways. She sees with new eyes just how deplorable her temperament and actions are. Her vanity then overpowers her pride, and she reforms.

Lucentio jumps up, as if struck by a bolt of lighting.

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

I understand perfectly!

The stage lights dim rapidly, plunging the arena into darkness. Moments later the lights rise up again: once more a hysterical Lucentio kneels before his brother-in-law.

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

I don't understand!

PETRUCHIO

Which part?

LUCENTIO

All of it! How does a man become a living mirror?

PETRUCHIO

Well which of Bianca's mannerisms infuriates you the most?

LUCENTIO

That is a difficult question, for there is very little about her that I like.

PETRUCHIO

Splendid! Our canvas is large! Name any mannerism then.

Lucentio rises to his feet and starts pacing up and down on the floorboards.

LUCENTIO

The woman is obsessed with clothing: she must have the latest fashions before anyone else, regardless of cost and inconvenience.

PETRUCHIO

Then the plan of attack is a simple one. Feign an obsession with clothing and appearance before your wife's very eyes. Mirror her conduct.

LUCENTIO

And for how long must I continue this charade?

PETRUCHIO

Continue with the performance until she becomes repelled by the behavior. If she has an ounce of intelligence she will soon recognize her own flawed conduct in your actions and do away with her preening.

LUCENTIO

And the change will be a permanent one?

PETRUCHIO

A week from now you will not recognize your wife.

LUCENTIO

I can scarcely believe it.

PETRUCHIO

Kate is living proof of the strategy's robustness.

Lucentio steps up to Petruchio and hugs him enthusiastically. The men break apart.

LUCENTIO

I am indebted to you. I will become a living mirror as soon as possible.

PETRUCHIO

AHA! There is no time like the present. Marital bliss awaits you!

LUCENTIO

Let us go then.

PETRUCHIO

I follow your lead.

Lucentio bounds off the stage, while Petruchio follows with a more unwieldy gait.

The curtains close.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 7: Bianca's drawing room: Late afternoon

_Set design:_ As per scene 3.

*^*^*

The curtains open to reveal BIANCA standing before her mirror in yet another dress. KATE meanwhile sits on the sofa chair and reads a book.

BIANCA

Our soup will now be cold.

KATE

That is a small matter.

BIANCA

Tell me: are you always so forgiving when your husband is so late?

KATE

Sometimes...

Bianca loses her composure and spins around to face her sister.

BIANCA

Heavens! And just how am I to react upon Lucentio's arrival?

Kate pulls her gaze away from her book and smiles at her sibling.

KATE

You must re-heat his soup the moment he enters the front door.

Bianca cannot stop her mouth from falling open in shock.

BIANCA

I simply cannot understand how your mind works. You advise me to reward good behavior, but you now talk of rewarding lateness.

KATE

We are embarking on a long journey, and the first step demands that we sacrifice our pride and our principles.

BIANCA

Sacrifice our pride and our principles! Do tell me dear sister: are we required to make a similar sacrifice when we take the second step?

KATE

I am afraid I neglected to mention a fourth golden rule while we were preparing the soup.

BIANCA

Praise the heavens! There is another golden rule. And what might that be?

KATE

The fourth rule states that all rules are occasionally meant to be broken.

Bianca throws her hands up in the air in exasperation as Kate turns her attentions to her book. A pregnant pause follows until Bianca walks up behind her sister and peers over her shoulder.

BIANCA

What are you reading?

KATE

I am studying the fine art of birth control.

BIANCA

I knew it!

KATE

You knew what?

BIANCA

You guard your figure more jealously than I do.

Kate slams her book shut.

KATE

I do not guard my figure Bianca: I guard my liberty!

BIANCA

You know as well as I do that children destroy a woman's hips and breasts. Keep your pompous excuse for some other occasion.

Bianca strides across to her mirror and concentrates once more on her image.

KATE

I am curious to know sister how you have kept motherhood at bay.

BIANCA

As am I as far as you are concerned.

KATE

Perhaps some things are better left unsaid.

Bianca spins around to face her sister.

BIANCA

There is no need to be shy Kate.

KATE

Very well: I rely on a mixture of herbs, assisted by the pulp of the humble pomegranate.

BIANCA

My technique is more effective I think.

KATE

Oh?

BIANCA

I abstain altogether.

KATE

I do not think that is wise.

BIANCA

Why not?

KATE

The woman who does not invite her husband into her bed ends up inviting a prostitute into her marriage. Or worse...

BIANCA

I can live with a prostitute Kate, but I cannot live with a child. And you are a fool for thinking that Petruchio will not stray if you simply offer yourself to him on a regular basis. Men are incapable of fidelity.

PETRUCHIO

(Off stage)

Hello the house!

KATE

That will be Petruchio!

Kate stands up to greet her husband while Bianca seats herself on the sofa. Moments later PETRUCHIO staggers onto the stage looking very unsteady on his feet.

PETRUCHIO

Fair ladies: you both look ravishing.

KATE

My darling husband...

Kate walks up to her partner and kisses him on the forehead.

KATE

The wine in this part of the land meets with your approval.

PETRUCHIO

Indeed it does.

KATE

And where is Lucentio?

Petruchio looks over his right shoulder. He then spins around 360 degrees before fronting up to Kate.

PETRUCHIO

Madam, I swear to you: he was by my side a moment ago.

KATE

And have you found your page?

PETRUCHIO

Regretfully madam the scoundrel is still at large. But do not fear: I shall locate both him and your horse before we depart for Rome.

BIANCA

And how will you do that if you are drunk?

PETRUCHIO

With great difficulty madam! But let it never be said that I shy away from a challenge.

LUCENTIO suddenly marches onto the stage wearing the dress that Bianca had on earlier. He takes a seat beside his astonished wife while Kate gawks and Petruchio rubs his eyes. Bianca jumps to her feet in a murderous rage.

BIANCA

My dress!

Lucentio mimics his wife's action with alarming accuracy.

LUCENTIO

My dress!

BIANCA

My dress!

LUCENTIO

My dress!

Bianca waves a finger in front of Lucentio's face.

BIANCA

Don't you dare play games with me!

LUCENTIO

Don't you dare play games with me!

Bianca slaps Lucentio across the cheek, and is promptly struck herself. Kate quickly walks up to the pair and slides in between them.

KATE

Lucentio: your wife has prepared some aromatic soup. Come and be seated at the table while she fetches it for you.

Bianca storms offstage while Kate takes Lucentio by the arm and guides him to the dining table. As the lord of the house takes his seat Petruchio places a hand on his belly and holds the other up in protest.

PETRUCHIO

My love: I am afraid I can spare no room in my stomach for your sister's soup.

Kate glares at her husband with a murderous expression on her face.

KATE

Would you care to repeat that remark? I believe I may have misheard you.

Petruchio reconsiders his position, and then lowers both of his hands to his sides.

PETRUCHIO

I said that soup would be _lovely_. I can scarcely wait to try it.

Petruchio takes a seat at the table.

PETRUCHIO

Lucentio, why are you dressed in your wife's clothing?

LUCENTIO

Surely you see Petruchio: we discussed this matter earlier.

PETRUCHIO

We did no such thing!

Lucentio is gob-smacked by his brother-in-law's denial.

LUCENTIO

But you advised me to become a living mirror!

An argument is poised to break out, but at that moment Bianca reappears on stage with a large pot in her hands.

The furious young woman marches up behind Lucentio and empties the contents of the container over his head. Petruchio and Kate yell out in alarm and tried to avoid soup splatter while Lucentio sits as still as a statue.

BIANCA

(Aloud)

Enjoy your soup – all of you!

Bianca throws the empty pot to the floor and storms off stage. Moments later Petruchio's drunken state gets the better of him, and he starts laughing at Lucentio's appearance.

LUCENTIO

I see I have allowed myself to become the butt of a cruel joke!

Lucentio stands up in a huff and marches out of the arena. Kate promptly turns on her husband with an anger that is barely contained.

KATE

You are a meddlesome troublemaker!

PETRUCHIO

Madam?

KATE

I encourage my sister to prepare a meal for her husband, and to display courtesy and respect before him. And while I labor away you tell Lucentio to dress in her clothing and act in an offensive manner! I almost believe you are trying to sabotage my plans for winning our wager.

PETRUCHIO

Sabotage your efforts! Perish that scandalous thought. I am drunk and can bear no responsibility for my actions.

KATE

If you will not bear responsibility then who will?

PETRUCHIO

That is a perplexing question. But I shall find an answer for you within the next day or so.

KATE

Grumio will doubtless become your scape-goat.

Mere mention of Grumio whips Petruchio up into a lather.

PETRUCHIO

That man is the devil in disguise! He is the root of all evil!

Kate's demeanor mellows quite suddenly, and she adopts a somber stance as she heads for the exit.

KATE

I pity your poor page.

PETRUCHIO

Madam, what will you do now?

Kate stops in her tracks and looks back at her husband.

KATE

I shall have to re-visit my plan of action. But have no doubts Petruchio: I will win our wager. And when I do I will make you beg for mercy.

Petruchio chuckles in delight.

PETRUCHIO

Kate my love, I'm counting on it!

The curtains close as Petruchio jumps to his feet, bounds after his wife and pats her on the backside.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 8: Pisa town square: Late afternoon

_Set design:_ As per Scene 4.

*^*^*

GABRIELLE leads ANDREA and a POLICE OFFICER up to his mother's villa.

GABRIELLE

Officer, the wench is barricaded inside!

The policeman knocks on the villa's front door while Gabrielle strides into the center of the stage accompanied by a vibrant and silly tune. He is soon joined by Andrea, and the two friends launch into a ridiculous song.

GABRIELLE

(Singing)

Let it be said right from the start,

That in my home I stand apart.

I am the one with the guts and brawn,

Who protects the place from dusk till dawn.

ANDREA

(Singing)

All he asks from his young wife,

Is a family life free from strife.

Whatever happened to female grace?

This whole affair is a big disgrace.

GABRIELLE

(Singing)

Let it be known as I stand and sing,

That in my home I am the king.

I am the one who holds the gold,

And ventures forth in the world so bold.

ANDREA

(Singing)

All he asks from his young wife,

Is a family life free from strife.

Whatever happened to female grace?

This whole affair is a big disgrace.

GABRIELLE

(Singing)

Let it be clear till the end of time,

That in my home I rule sublime.

I am the one with the leadership skills,

And I am the one who foots the bills.

ANDREA

(Singing)

All he asks from his young wife,

Is a family life free from strife.

Whatever happened to female grace?

This whole affair is a big disgrace.

MARIA walks onto the villa balcony that overlooks the town square. She is joined by 2 female FRIENDS who stand beside her.

MARIA

Have you finished crowing Gabrielle?

GABRIELLE

Wench, you are to be officially charged as a criminal!

MARIA

A criminal!

GABRIELLE

Officer, read out the warrant.

The policeman steps away from the villa door, removes a scroll from his belt and proceeds to read its contents out loud.

OFFICER

(Aloud)

You are charged with the following misdemeanors: 1) neglecting to recognize your husband's supreme authority; 2) subjecting your husband to social embarrassment and; 3) serving as a bad influence to the women around you.

Maria and her friends burst out laughing as a lighthearted tune picks up.

FEMALE SPECTATOR 1

Oh.... He thinks he's got it tough and much too rough,

Why don't you spare us the flack? You don't know jack!

FEMALE SPECTATOR 2

Rough is feeding the kids 3 meals a day,

With no word of thanks and no sign of pay!

MARIA

Rough is washing clothes till your hands feel sore,

With no offers of help to even the score!

FEMALE SPECTATOR 1

Rough is kissing a man who eats garlic for lunch,

With a breath so strong it packs its very own punch!

FEMALE SPECTATOR 2

Rough is bedding a man who blows his load in a sec,

With no hint of remorse he leaves a mess on the deck!

MARIA

Rough is being ignored as your husband screws around,

With an enthusiasm that grows as you put on each pound!

FEMALE SPECTATOR 1

Rough is never knowing where you stand in the game,

With unending pressure you're made to feel shame.

MARIA/ SPECTATOR 1/ SPECTATOR 2

(In unison)

Just do us a favor and move right along,

End your gripes and petulant song.

Adios, farewell, ciao, and adieu!

Be gone, vamoose, shoo, shoo, shoo!

The police officer now becomes a touch irate.

OFFICER

Madam, if you do not surrender I will arrange for this front door to be broken down!

MARIA

The door belongs to my mother-in-law. By all means, break it down!

OFFICER

And the longer you resist your arrest the harsher your punishment will be.

MARIA

You forget that I am married officer. No punishment you inflict can be worse than that!

OFFICER

(Aloud)

I will have you locked in solitary confinement for your impudence!

Maria's defiant demeanor suddenly gives way to a look of enthusiastic anticipation.

MARIA

Solitary confinement! You should have mentioned that sooner. I would relish some time to myself.

Maria disappears indoors, much to her friends' consternation. Moments later she opens the villa's front door and steps out into the town square.

GABRIELLE

Confine her to a cage and throw away the key!

OFFICER

As you wish.

The policeman takes Maria by the arm and leads her off stage while Gabrielle and Andrea rejoice with a silly little jig.

GABRIELLE

(Singing)

What did I tell you, what did I say?

I'd make her sorry, I'd make her pay!

I'll take no rudeness, I'll take no bile,

No temper tantrums, no mood that's vile.

ANDREA

(Singing)

Let no one claim that he's a sheep,

This house is his, his to keep.

If you don't like him then move along,

He's in the right, she's in the wrong.

GABRIELLE

(Singing)

Hooray for justice! Hooray for me!

A happier man I cannot be!

I claim my victory, I claim the gong,

Farewell Maria, goodbye and so long!

The curtains close on the dancing buffoons.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 9: Lucentio's bathroom: Early evening

_Set design:_ Lucentio's bathroom is a no-nonsense affair with little to show in the way of beauty or style. A giant tub sits in the center of the arena while windows in the background overlook a garden covered in a pink sunset.

*^*^*

The curtains open to reveal LUCENTIO splashing about in a foam bath. The Italian seems genuinely dissatisfied with the state of his life.

LUCENTIO

Marry they said! Take a wife, procreate, be fruitful and happy. But where was the warning? Where was the clause, "Oh Buyer Beware"? The outrage of it all! The unfairness! A tragedy such as this deserves a poem, or a play... I can even imagine the title right now: "The devil wears a dress!" And the general description for the public: _the despicably sad tale of a man with handsome features, and money, and education, who is denied the last decoration that would make him complete_... Expressing it aloud hurts my chest and squeezes down on my throat. I dare say my life would be better if I were ugly, and poor, and stupid enough to work in the fields. At least then I'd never be expected to amount to much.

KATE tiptoes on stage and makes her way up behind Lucentio as he continues to complain to himself.

Vile, cantankerous wench... _I am the Queen of all I see and I am not your sweet to eat_... Blah, blah, blah... One might as well live with a dog!

KATE

Ahem!

Lucentio is so shocked by the sound of Kate clearing her throat that he nearly jumps right out of the bathtub.

LUCENTIO

Kate!

KATE

Lucentio!

Lucentio slaps his hands over his pectorals as he struggles to contain his discomfort with the situation.

LUCENTIO

Kate, I...

KATE

Oh don't be embarrassed brother-in-law. I frequently talk aloud in the bathtub.

LUCENTIO

What are you doing in here?

KATE

I wish to speak with you of course.

LUCENTIO

Can it not wait?

KATE

I regard the subject matter as somewhat urgent.

LUCENTIO

If Petruchio were to walk in now...

KATE

Petruchio is asleep.

LUCENTIO

And Bianca...

KATE

My sister has no desire to see you naked, I can assure you.

Lucentio spots his towel on the floor beside the tub and tries to reach for it without exposing himself any further.

LUCENTIO

Please allow me to change first...

Kate rolls her eyes to the heavens, then scoops up the towel and daintily hands it to her brother-in-law.

KATE

Continue your bath Lucentio: I am not embarrassed by your present state, and neither should you be.

Lucentio drapes the towel over the tub, even though the foam on the water surface does a perfectly adequate job of hiding his lower extremities.

LUCENTIO

Kate...

Kate sits herself down on the rim of the tub and studies Lucentio's face with earnestness.

KATE

My sister is a difficult woman, is she not? She spends her hours immersed in self adulation, and when you appear before her she flares up in a temper.

LUCENTIO

Kate... I...

PETRUCHIO

(Off stage)

Kate!

Both Kate and Lucentio jump at the sound of Petruchio's voice. A sense of urgency now possesses the pair.

LUCENTIO

You said he was asleep!

KATE

Lucentio, listen to me. I know my sister's character in-depth, and I am in a position to help you transform her demeanor for the better. Will you meet with me tomorrow in the garden to talk further?

PETRUCHIO

(Off stage)

Kate – where are you?

LUCENTIO

Kate, this is...

Kate quickly places her hand over Lucentio's mouth.

KATE

You will have no regrets, I can assure you.

Lucentio nods his head until Kate stands up and steps away from him.

LUCENTIO

Very well: 11 o clock by the statue of Cupid. Now please leave before your husband enters and kills us both!

KATE

Tomorrow then! Sleep well Lucentio.

Kate beats a hasty retreat, leaving Lucentio in a state of disarray. The lord of the house clutches his towel close to his chest, as if in need of comfort.

LUCENTIO

My wife is a witch and her sister is a lunatic. I'd feel safer living in a house packed with barbarians!

The curtains close on the disgruntled gentleman.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 10: Bianca's drawing room: Morning

_Set design:_ As per Scene 3.

*^*^*

BIANCA paces up and down in her favorite domain. The shrew is lost in thought, and almost doesn't notice TRANIO as he bounds into the room with the dress that Lucentio recently donned.

TRANIO

My lady, good news! I have rescued your dress.

Bianca snaps out of her reveries, but is momentarily confused by her servant's remark.

BIANCA

Rescued my dress?

TRANIO

The one that had soup spilt over it.

The lady of the house fails to prevent a look of contempt from appearing on her face.

BIANCA

Do you think for one moment that I will wear that thing again?

TRANIO

It is clean my lady. You cannot even detect an aroma.

BIANCA

I do not want that garment back Tranio! What I desire is something altogether quite different.

TRANIO

May I keep this then? For my sister of course...

BIANCA

I do not care who you give it to. I do not care if you wear it yourself!

TRANIO

Thank you my lady... My sister will be most grateful.

Tranio bows and looks set to turn and leave.

BIANCA

Tranio.

TRANIO

Yes my lady?

BIANCA

I am interested in your views on a certain subject matter.

TRANIO

Yes.

Bianca approaches her hired help and starts to circle him.

BIANCA

Assume for the moment that you have a household of your own. By law you would be the sovereign ruler of this domain, and those living under your roof would have to do your bidding. Do you follow me?

TRANIO

So far my lady.

BIANCA

Good. Now answer this question: under what circumstances would you share your sovereign power with your wife in an equal manner?

TRANIO

I cannot think of any my lady.

BIANCA

If you loved her: would this not be a good reason to share your power with her?

TRANIO

A man can love a woman and still be her master in all respects.

BIANCA

I have another question for you: in your opinion would it be possible for your imaginary wife to steal your sovereign power from you over an extended period of time?

TRANIO

How might she accomplish that?

BIANCA

By offering certain rewards to you in exchange for certain concessions. Over a matter of time, mind you, and without you being aware of the process.

Tranio cannot conceal his confusion, and he scratches his head in an absent minded manner.

TRANIO

What rewards do you speak of? And what concessions?

BIANCA

I shall leave those particulars to your imagination. Now answer my question.

Tranio considers the matter for a few moments before answering in a thoughtful manner.

TRANIO

If my wife were particularly cunning she might indeed usurp my power.

BIANCA

Does that concern you?

TRANIO

No my lady.

BIANCA

And why is that?

TRANIO

Because any powers that I may cede to my wife can be immediately repossessed at any time.

Bianca considers Tranio's remark for a moment before responding.

BIANCA

Tell me: would you be angry if you discovered that your wife had been manipulating you to her advantage?

TRANIO

If I loved and trusted her I would be outraged. And if I despised her I would then have more reason to do away with her.

Bianca strides to the edge of the stage and looks into the distance.

BIANCA

You have been more helpful than I anticipated Tranio. You may go.

Tranio exits, leaving Bianca to herself. The sinister young woman smiles a devilish smile and proceeds to talk aloud to herself.

I do declare it is time for a little sport. I may be made a fool of, but let it not be said that I take insult and injury without retaliation.

The stage lighting dims as the curtains close on the lady of the house.

*^*^*^*^*^*

## ACT 3

### Scene 11: Lucentio's wine cellar: Mid morning

_Set design:_ Barrels stand stacked up against the rear of the stage, while stone pillars support a high vaulted ceiling over the arena. A cobbled floor is the final touch to the set.

*^*^*

The curtains open as LUCENTIO fills a glass with red wine from an oak barrel. BIANCA walks into view moments later and claps her hands loudly. Lucentio promptly drops his glass onto the ground, much to his wife's delight.

BIANCA

The strength of your grip is a variable thing I see.

Lucentio glares at Bianca and seems ready to physically attack her.

LUCENTIO

I fear the rodents in this cellar are growing too large. I need a bigger cat – perhaps a lion.

Bianca delivers a forced, sarcastic laugh.

BIANCA

Before your lion eats me will you ask him to spare my dress for your wardrobe?

LUCENTIO

What do you want Bianca?

BIANCA

I have come to tell you how fortunate you are to have me as your wife.

Lucentio laughs at the outrageous comment.

LUCENTIO

My ears are deceiving me!

BIANCA

We may fight tooth and claw, but at least our relationship is an honest one. I cannot say the same for my sister's marriage.

LUCENTIO

I see there is no love lost between you two.

BIANCA

Sisters talk to one another to an extent that brothers do not. I know all of Kate's secrets – all of them. She lets Petruchio believe she loves him when she cares not a stitch for his body or soul. And he does her bidding without realizing that she controls him in the way a master puppeteer controls a figurine.

Lucentio shakes his head from side to side, disgusted with his wife's pettiness.

LUCENTIO

The idea that your sister can be happy has ignited a burning envy inside your hollow chest. Now you resort to idle lies and gossip.

BIANCA

You think I lie!

LUCENTIO

Can you prove your assertions?

BIANCA

I can do more than that. I will bring Kate down here to talk further about her marriage. You must hide behind these casks and listen to our conversation. Then later you will quietly thank the heavens that you do not walk in Petruchio's shoes.

LUCENTIO

Very well: I await your return.

Bianca exits the cellar.

Tranio!

The household page bounds into view a few moments later.

TRANIO

You called my lord?

Lucentio points to the broken wine glass on the floor.

LUCENTIO

Behold – the mess that a woman can make.

TRANIO

I have seen worse my lord. I can recall a recent incident involving soup that was far larger.

LUCENTIO

To think that I pursued Bianca with so much vigor...

TRANIO

To think that I helped you...

LUCENTIO

Hindsight is a wonderful thing my man. But foresight is better.

TRANIO

I agree my lord.

PETRUCHIO walks into the arena before Tranio can start to clean up the broken glass.

PETRUCHIO

Ah – Lucentio!

LUCENTIO

Petruchio – do you require something from my cellar? Or perhaps you have come to apologize to me?

PETRUCHIO

Neither. Bianca mentioned in passing that you wished to talk to me down here.

A moment of stunned silence passes before an expression of understanding flashes across Lucentio's face.

LUCENTIO

I might have guessed.

PETRUCHIO

Guessed what?

LUCENTIO

I hear approaching voices. Both of you must stand behind this row of casks.

PETRUCHIO

For what reason?

LUCENTIO

Kindly reserve your questions for later.

Lucentio ushers his brother-in-law and page behind a row of barrels moments before KATE and BIANCA step into view. Kate immediately spots the wine glass on the floor.

KATE

Bianca, is it customary in your home to leave glass on the floor?

BIANCA

When you live with my husband then the answer is clearly yes.

KATE

I see.

BIANCA

Kate, I wish to express my dissatisfaction with your counsel.

KATE

Oh?

BIANCA

How am I to apply your 3 golden rules when I live with a man who wears my dresses and seeks to mimic my every move? I think it is beyond reasonable.

KATE

Bianca, you must understand that Lucentio was simply following Petruchio's drunken advice.

BIANCA

Your husband gives out strange advice, even for a drunk man.

KATE

That may be true. But it is also true that you failed to rise to the occasion.

Bianca flares up at the criticism.

BIANCA

I failed! How would you have reacted if Petruchio had entered the room in one of your dresses?

KATE

I would have joked with him.

BIANCA

Even if you had felt nothing but anger?

KATE

Even so. To survive in a marriage it is necessary for a woman to become adept at hiding her true feelings. You have much to learn in this regard. Your husband must believe you love him, even if you do not. Your husband must believe you find him attractive, even if he repulses you. Your husband must also believe that you take delight in his conversation, even if he is a bore. I say this because men hold almost all of the power within a home, and they are more apt to use it against you if they believe they are unneeded and unwanted.

BIANCA

Kate, is there any honesty at all in your relationship with Petruchio?

KATE

Of course there is honesty.

BIANCA

But not a great deal I take it.

KATE

There is enough to get by.

BIANCA

Do you love your husband?

Kate considers this question carefully before responding.

KATE

What I feel for my husband is not a static thing, so I cannot give you a succinct answer.

Bianca emits a laugh that betrays her inner contempt for the proceedings.

BIANCA

You have always felt the need to complicate simple answers.

KATE

And you have always presumed to know more than you actually do.

BIANCA

If that is the case then why have I sought further counsel on the application of your marital tricks?

KATE

I have no tricks to impart to you: only techniques and principles.

BIANCA

A trick by any other name is still a trick Kate.

KATE

I am sorry you feel that way, and perhaps I can show you otherwise this afternoon. Please excuse me for now: I have another matter to attend to.

Kate exits the cellar, leaving her sister to silently gloat over the morning's events.

BIANCA

Lucentio: be sure to have this wine and glass cleared off the floor. You may wish to live in a pig sty but I do not.

Bianca strides from the arena with a definite sense of triumph about her. A few moments later Petruchio, Lucentio and Tranio emerge from behind the column of casks.

LUCENTIO

This is a sad state of affairs, is it not?

TRANIO

It is my lord.

LUCENTIO

(To Tranio)

Tell me: if you had the choice between my hostile marriage and Petruchio's marriage, which would you take?

TRANIO

My lord, I am not in a position to answer.

LUCENTIO

Speak up my man! Your answer will not be held against you.

TRANIO

I would take neither my lord.

LUCENTIO

You would rather live alone?

TRANIO

Yes my lord.

LUCENTIO

And what do you say Petruchio?

Petruchio cannot look his brother-in-law in the eye, and wears an expression of hurt rage on his face.

PETRUCHIO

I think you are a wise man Tranio. You would be wiser still to avoid eavesdropping with your master. If you indulge in the practice you will become cynical, and the cynical are known to live miserable lives.

TRANIO

Yes my lord.

Petruchio stomps off the stage.

LUCENTIO

Please clear this wine and glass from the floor.

TRANIO

I will my lord.

The lights dim and the curtains close as Lucentio exits the arena.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 12: Lucentio's garden: Mid morning

_Set design:_ The backdrop presents a garden of exquisite design. Flower beds are carefully maintained and lead up to a man size statue of Cupid (replete with bow and arrow). A stone bench is located nearby.

*^*^*

KATE stands beside CUPID and glares at the man-like angel.

KATE

Tell me angel: where is your magic when I need it? Where is the arrow dipped in love potion that will pierce Bianca's heart and then Lucentio's? I think it rather unfair of you to leave all the hard work to me, especially when I have a husband who seems intent on undermining my efforts.

Kate pauses and looks out towards the distance, seemingly concerned about something. She does not notice LUCENTIO as he quietly steps up behind her.

Something is amiss... I can sense it in my bones. My sister cannot be trusted. Nor can Petruchio. Even Lucentio for that matter... What a fine crowd of people I find myself surrounded by... Well you mark my words angel: I shall persevere.

LUCENTIO

Ahem!

Kate jumps in fright and turns to face her brother-in-law.

KATE

Lucentio!

LUCENTIO

Oh don't be embarrassed dear lady. You are not the only person in this house to talk aloud to themselves.

KATE

Indeed. I thank you for coming, and I ask you to take a seat beside me.

LUCENTIO

I will stand thank you.

KATE

You believe I will bite?

LUCENTIO

No Kate. I believe you inflict pain in more subtle ways.

Kate is momentarily stunned by her brother-in-law's remark.

KATE

On what grounds do you hold such a view?

LUCENTIO

This very morning I heard words from your mouth that would ignite a fire in any married man's stomach.

KATE

Oh?

LUCENTIO

You spoke with your sister in my cellar.

Kate suddenly puffs her chest out, angry at the position she now finds herself in.

KATE

Is it common practice to eavesdrop in your house?

LUCENTIO

You have counseled my wife in the art of deception Kate. And now you wish to draw me into the web of lies that you are dexterously spinning. Your father has truly done a disservice to mankind by raising two daughters so lacking in virtue.

KATE

You judge me without knowing my motives.

LUCENTIO

And you adopt an inappropriate tone Kate. By all rights I should throw you from this house, but I will leave that task to your aggrieved husband.

Kate's defensive demeanor collapses, and she reveals an inner desperation.

KATE

Leave him be! I beg of you.

LUCENTIO

Leave him be? Oh Kate, I do not need to speak words into his ears when your lecherous sibling has taken care of such matters already.

Lucentio turns his back on his sister-in-law and marches from the garden. Kate's composure is now at breaking point, and she takes her head in her hands as she struts up to the edge of the stage.

KATE

(Aloud)

Bianca! Meddlesome trouble maker! Why? Why did I not foresee this?

Cupid suddenly comes to life in the background.

CUPID

(Aloud)

That is an easy question to answer.

Once more Kate receives a fright, and she quickly turns to face her surprising companion. The sight of the statue moving about leaves her astonished and confused.

KATE

You talk!

CUPID

Don't we all?

KATE

This is nonsense... I need to rest my head.

Cupid tiptoes towards Kate and starts to circle her with dainty movements.

CUPID

No fair lady... There is no time for that.

KATE

Stop moving about!

CUPID

But I have been standing still for decades. A little exercise will be good for the joints.

Kate seems ready to collapse, and clasps her forehead with her right hand.

KATE

I will lose my senses if you do not return to your place.

CUPID

Do you not want to hear your answer then?

KATE

Answer?

CUPID

To your question: _why did I not foresee this?_

A surge of impatience grabs hold of Kate.

KATE

Very well, give me your response.

CUPID

You are a creature of intellect and wit, and such beings fall prey to arrogance when they have enjoyed success for too long.

KATE

You think me arrogant!

CUPID

I do!

KATE

You are most rude for an angel!

Cupid chuckles at the reprimand like a cheeky school boy.

CUPID

My lady, bestowing flattery upon me will not do your cause any good.

KATE

I do _not_ seek to flatter you! Nor do I think much of your assessment.

CUPID

Kate the cat, hear me now: you are that rare creature that can recognize happiness and hold it in the palm of her hand. But you have dropped the prize, and if you do not tread carefully you will lose it down a crack. Choose your actions wisely.

Cupid hops back to his low pedestal and resumes his posture upon it. Kate eyes the motionless artwork for a few moments as she digests what she has just heard.

KATE

Very well then: I will admit to your charge of arrogance. But know this cherub: I do not lie down and play dead when I am the victim of deceptive conduct. This woman bites back!

The curtains close as Kate marches away from view.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 13: Pisa town square: Midday

_Set design:_ As per Scene 4.

*^*^*

The curtains open to reveal GRUMIO lying fast asleep, propped up against the fountain in the town square. He has a bottle of wine clasped in his hands. Moments later PETRUCHIO walks into the arena and spots the page. He treads up to his servant, kneels down beside him, and cups his hands around his mouth before yelling out loud.

PETRUCHIO

Grumio!

Grumio wakes up in an instant, wide eyed and alarmed.

GRUMIO

(Aloud)

What? Who? Where? Why?

Petruchio slaps his page on the back of the head.

PETRUCHIO

You are a thief and vagabond and deserve nothing less than a lashing! Where is Kate's horse?

Grumio tries to focus his eyes for a few moments.

GRUMIO

In a stable my lord.

PETRUCHIO

At least there is a small ounce of common sense in your thick head.

Petruchio sits down alongside his page. He snatches the bottle of wine out of Grumio's hands, notices that it is half full, and takes a big sip.

PETRUCHIO

You are a fortunate man not to be married Grumio.

GRUMIO

Am I my lord?

PETRUCHIO

You are not shackled to a woman filled with spite and hurtful intentions. Or to one that is adept at deceiving your heart.

GRUMIO

Yes my lord.

PETRUCHIO

Is it better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all? Do not believe what the poets will tell you on this point. They romanticize and forget too easily the price that love commands.

Grumio tilts his head back and starts to snore loudly. Petruchio looks at his page in annoyance just as KATE walks onto the stage and spots her husband.

KATE

Petruchio! I have searched high and low for you. I see you have found Grumio.

Petruchio avoids eye contact with his wife and remains silent as she approaches him.

What is troubling you my lord? Or tell me how I may brighten your mood.

Petruchio sulks in silence for a few moments more before looking up at Kate with a desperate expression carved into his face.

PETRUCHIO

Free me from the grasp of uncertainty Kate.

KATE

And how may I do that?

PETRUCHIO

Lower the mask that you presently wear and show me what hides beneath.

Kate smiles and pats her cheeks.

KATE

My lord, I wear no mask.

PETRUCHIO

I do not believe you Kate!

KATE

Perhaps you would care to pat my cheeks yourself.

Petruchio places Grumio's bottle on the ground, rises to his feet and sweeps Kate up in a bear hug. Kate laughs at the gesture.

If you desire to hold me you should ask.

Petruchio presses his wife closely to his chest, right to the point where she stops laughing and grimaces.

Petruchio, you press too tightly!

PETRUCHIO

And Kate, you lie too well!

KATE

My lord, I....

PETRUCHIO

To survive in a marriage it is necessary for a woman to become adept at hiding her true feelings. Her husband must believe she loves him, even if she does not. Her husband must believe she finds him attractive, even if he repulses her. Her husband must also believe that she takes delight in his conversation, even if he is a bore!

The bitterness in Petruchio's voice is matched only by the anger in Kate's.

KATE

How dare you eavesdrop on a private conversation! Release me at once!

PETRUCHIO

Aha! I suspect the mask is falling away. Perhaps if I squeeze more tightly!

Kate squirms about in Petruchio's grasp, desperate and afraid.

KATE

I cannot breathe!

PETRUCHIO

Kate, have you deceived me with false whispers of love and shallow signs of affection?

Kate gasps for air as she looks into her husband's murderous face. She tries to push away but cannot break free.

KATE

My lord, those words only apply to Bianca's marriage.

PETRUCHIO

Is that so?

KATE

Have you forgotten our wager? Is it not reasonable for me to encourage Bianca to hide her true feelings? Feelings which we both know she expresses too freely...

Petruchio suddenly releases Kate and steps back from her. His anger has dissipated but his emotions are still volatile.

PETRUCHIO

Your sister asked if you loved me, and you would not provide a clear response. Well you must answer now Kate: do you love me?

Kate clasps her rib cage in pain and glares at the man before her.

KATE

I will say again that there is no simple answer to that question.

PETRUCHIO

Then I do not ask for a simple answer!

Kate pauses to gather her composure. After taking some deep breaths she speaks her mind.

KATE

I love the idea of a certain man Petruchio. This man respects me as his equal and treats me as a friend. He guides me and follows me at the same time, and never takes more than he is prepared to give. He forgives my vices when it is necessary to do so, and tolerates them even when it is not. And if he hurts me it is only by accident.

Petruchio is visibly stung by his wife's words.

PETRUCHIO

Leave me be Kate.

KATE

I beg your pardon?

PETRUCHIO

Never touch me again! Never whisper another lie in my ears! Just leave me be.

Petruchio turns and strides away, and in doing so enrages Kate.

KATE

You pathetic excuse for a man!

Petruchio stops in his tracks and spins around quickly.

PETRUCHIO

What did you just call me?

KATE

You heard me perfectly well!

PETRUCHIO

You betray my heart, and now you stomp what is left of it into the dirt!

KATE

My word but your ego is a fragile thing.

PETRUCHIO

And still you continue... Well damn you woman! That idea you love... the idea of a perfect man... why do you not think that I am him? Do I not treat you with respect? Do I not allow you liberties that few other women have? Do I not tolerate your strong will and your thirst for self improvement?

KATE

You do all of those things.

PETRUCHIO

Then why can you not answer me straight? Why can you not say you love me?

Kate swallows hard and loses just a little of her fiery demeanor.

KATE

Because... the kindnesses you show me are kindnesses that I have had to fight for. They have not sprung from your nature by themselves. I have had to coax them out, draw them out, nourish and sustain them even when my pride demanded action to the contrary... I have _paid_ for every liberty extended to me... I have _worked_ for my respect. You want a simple answer; well I will give you a simple answer: _only now am I learning to love you_. And I cannot say if there is an end point to the journey...

Kate turns her back on her husband and walks towards the edge of the square.

PETRUCHIO

Kate...

The tone in Petruchio's voice makes Kate stop in her tracks: it is both desperate and pitiful.

KATE

What?

PETRUCHIO

Kate... I want you to love me with all your soul. I want you to love me because I love you...Ask of me what you want and I will give it over gladly. What must I do for your affection?

Kate turns around to face her husband, and now there is a sly smile on her face.

KATE

Oh no, no, no... Winning over my heart will not be easy good sir. If I have to struggle for my rewards then so should you!

Petruchio throws his arms into the air in complete exasperation.

PETRUCHIO

(Aloud)

Whoever created the female mind? It is incomprehensible!

Kate bursts out laughing.

KATE

If you want my love dear man you must hold onto your sense of humor and your patience. God knows you will need both to survive me!

Petruchio looks at his wife in stunned silence, then suddenly erupts into a fit of laughter himself.

PETRUCHIO

You feisty wench!

KATE

Yes! Feisty would be my middle name!

PETRUCHIO

Know this woman! I will win your undying devotion, if it is the last thing I ever do!

The lovers move closer together, their moods greatly improved.

KATE

I am pleased to hear that. Now would you please stop making a spectacle of yourself in such a public place?

PETRUCHIO

Aye. And Kate...

KATE

Yes?

PETRUCHIO

You must know that it was never my intention to spy upon you. Your sister directed me into the cellar before your arrival and Lucentio urged me to conceal myself behind a wall of casks. My better judgment failed me.

KATE

My better judgment has escaped me too. I have interfered in a marriage that can never be a happy one. Lucentio desires a wife who will cook for him, clean for him, and raise children for him. And my sister desires nothing more than to primp and preen before a mirror each day.

Petruchio laughs out loud and shakes his head from side to side as he takes Kate's hands in his.

PETRUCHIO

I think it best if we depart for Rome within the hour.

KATE

We must cancel our wager then.

PETRUCHIO

Madam – I will happily pay you your gold coin now.

Petruchio reaches into his breast pocket, but Kate holds her right hand up in protest.

KATE

Keep your coin. But in exchange you must help me present a certain gift to my spiteful sister.

PETRUCHIO

A gift?

KATE

One that shall be remembered, though not with any degree of fondness.

Petruchio chuckles and pretends to sniff the air cautiously.

PETRUCHIO

Ah... I can smell it... It has just come wafting in on the breeze.

KATE

What do you smell?

PETRUCHIO

Mischief my lady...

KATE

I did not know mischief had a scent.

PETRUCHIO

But it does, I assure you.

Kate folds her arms and looks at her husband in mock surprise.

KATE

Perhaps you are above trickery then?

Petruchio roars with laughter at the notion.

PETRUCHIO

Above trickery! Why madam, _I lie beneath it_ , almost every night!

Kate joins in her husband's laughter.

KATE

I am glad to hear it. Follow me!

PETRUCHIO

And what of Grumio?

KATE

He appears content enough. Leave him be...

The curtains close as the couple walks from view.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 14: Gabrielle's nursery: Midday

_Set design:_ A humble cot sits in the center of a room devoid of fancy decoration. A window overlooks the rooftops of Pisa.

*^*^*

The screams and cries of a baby propel GABRIELLE and ANDREA into the nursery. The men position themselves on either side of the cot before Gabrielle lifts his child up and tries to soothe it. The man's efforts only make the infant cry louder.

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

This infernal racket! It will strip me bare of my sanity.

ANDREA

Where is your mother? Can she not soothe the child?

Andrea's questions only agitate Gabrielle further.

GABRIELLE

Where is my mother! _Where is my mother!_ I will tell you where she is! She is at the city prison visiting my cantankerous wife. Maria has duped the old raisin into joining her side.

ANDREA

I must take my hat off to your wife. She would do well in Rome as a politician.

GABRIELLE

Would you like me to box your ears?

ANDREA

No.

GABRIELLE

Then do not stand there and salute my enemy. Tell me how to silence this bundle of noise and stench.

ANDREA

There are a number of actions you might try. You may feed the child, change its clothing, sing to it or read aloud.

GABRIELLE

And which of those actions must I perform first?

ANDREA

Start from the top of the list and work your way down. One option is bound to be the necessary solution.

GABRIELLE

Very well: I will feed the child.

The two men exchange quizzical looks for a moment.

On second thoughts, it might be more appropriate to change the child's clothing.

ANDREA

A wise choice!

Gabrielle lifts his baby up and smells its diaper. He cringes in disgust.

GABRIELLE

My friend, the obvious solution is to sing to the child.

ANDREA

Do you know any suitable songs?

GABRIELLE

I fear not.

ANDREA

Then reading aloud will certainly do the trick.

Suddenly and inexplicably the baby stops crying. Looks of relief wash over the faces of the two men on stage.

GABRIELLE

Andrea, I believe the child simply wanted to be held!

ANDREA

You may be right my friend.

Gabrielle gently places his baby back in the cot. The two men look at the child for a few moments and then tiptoe away. As soon as they have exited the arena however the infant kicks up a ruckus once more. Gabrielle and Andrea run back to the cot with their nerves clearly frayed.

GABRIELLE

Now what do I do?

ANDREA

Allow me to try.

Andrea lifts the crying baby out of the cot and cradles it in his arms.

ANDREA

I will talk of politics if you do not cease to cry. I will speak freely of Rome's senators, its laws, its factions and its institutions. I will expound on political truths and theories, and...

The infant suddenly shuts up, much to the joy of its caretakers. Andrea places the baby back in the cot, and once more father and friend tiptoe away. As if on cue a piercing scream tears through the air the moment Gabrielle and Andrea exit the nursery. Once more the men have to run back into the arena. The two friends look into the cot with frantic expressions on their faces: then both throw their hands into the air.

ANDREA

(Aloud)

Fetch the mother!

GABRIELLE

(Aloud)

An excellent suggestion!

ANDREA

But wait! What will you say to her?

GABRIELLE

Whatever do you mean?

ANDREA

What is your game plan? This is war remember?

Gabrielle rolls his eyes to the heavens.

GABRIELLE

I do not need a game plan Andrea! I will simply drag Maria back here and bring an end to this nonsense.

Andrea shakes his head from side to side to register his disapproval.

ANDREA

Very well then... But be advised: I accompany you as an observer and not part of the cavalry.

GABRIELLE

Oh enough talk! I want silence.

The two men stride off the stage as the baby continues to wail. The curtains close.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 15: Bianca's drawing room: Early afternoon

_Set design:_ Gone is the orderliness of Bianca's favorite room. Her mirror has been shattered and her mannequin is dress-less. Her portraits are lopsided, and her bust lies on the ground in two pieces. Sofa cushions lie scattered on the floor, as do the room's dining chairs. The main table also sports a broken leg.

*^*^*

PETRUCHIO and KATE stand in the center of the stage area and kiss each other passionately. Seconds tick by, and then BIANCA and LUCENTIO walk into the arena. The lord and lady of the house both stop in their tracks and gasp at the damage before their eyes.

BIANCA

My drawing room!

Kate and Petruchio disengage from their embrace and look to their relatives.

PETRUCHIO

Please accept our humblest apologies. I fear that Kate and I have failed to contain ourselves.

Bianca gestures hysterically towards the broken table.

BIANCA

My table!

LUCENTIO

You fought?

KATE

Oh no!

PETRUCHIO

The exact opposite good sir.

BIANCA

My paintings!

Kate holds her head, as if recovering from a slight migraine.

KATE

A moment of blind, reckless passion... dazzling!

Lucentio's face suddenly betrays a look of complete horror.

LUCENTIO

You mean you...

Petruchio nods his head in the affirmative.

PETRUCHIO

Yes, we mean exactly that!

LUCENTIO

On my sofa?

PETRUCHIO

Aye! Followed by the table!

LUCENTIO

You jest!

Bianca recovers from her shock, and now expresses her murderous rage in her vocal tone and arm movements.

BIANCA

Where is my new dress?

KATE

Petruchio my love, can you remember what you did with my sister's new dress?

PETRUCHIO

Madam, I am embarrassed to speak of the matter.

KATE

My mind is cloaked in a fog of its own. It will undoubtedly be found Bianca, though we cannot vouch for its condition.

Bianca gasps loudly and then puts her hand to her mouth.

PETRUCHIO

We will of course pay for all damages.

Petruchio digs into his pants pocket and extracts a sack of coins which he then tosses on the sofa.

KATE

My darling sister, Petruchio has just received an urgent message from Rome and we must depart immediately. Once again, please accept our apologies for this destruction.

Kate blows her sister a kiss while Petruchio takes a bow.

PETRUCHIO

My lady, I thank you for your hospitality.

The couple from Verona makes a hasty retreat while Bianca and Lucentio struggle to come to terms with the day's events.

BIANCA

I don't understand.

LUCENTIO

No – you wouldn't! See that this mess is cleared up.

TRANIO bounds onto the stage at this point. He is deeply shocked by the destruction that he sees before him, and immediately suspects that his employers have had a major fight.

TRANIO

My lady, are you hurt?

BIANCA

No I am not, but I require your assistance clearing this room.

TRANIO

As you wish my lady.

Tranio covers half the distance to Bianca before Lucentio speaks out.

LUCENTIO

Walk no further Tranio. I require your assistance with my horse outside.

Tranio stops in his tracks and looks to his master.

BIANCA

Tranio, I requested your assistance first!

TRANIO

Yes my lady.

The page takes a step towards his mistress.

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

Halt right there! I am the master of this house. You will attend to me first!

Poor Tranio now looks absolutely torn, and he takes a step back in Lucentio's direction.

BIANCA

(Aloud)

_Do not move one step more!_ You scorn me at your own peril Tranio!

The household page looks to the heavens and throws his hands in the air.

TRANIO

Very well – I will help neither of you!

The servant spins around and stomps off stage, leaving Bianca and Lucentio to confront one another.

BIANCA

(Aloud)

Now look at what you have done!

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

I will not repeat my orders - see that this mess is cleared up!

The curtains slowly close as the couple goes to war.

BIANCA

(Aloud)

How dare you bark instructions at me!

LUCENTIO

(Aloud)

Woman, I hold you in such low esteem that if you say one more word you will slip beneath my contempt!

BIANCA

(Aloud)

Well you may rest assured that I will always despise you, regardless of how many more words you throw into the air!

LUCENTIO

Goat!

BIANCA

Peanut!

Lucentio's rage gives way to a moment of confusion.

LUCENTIO

Peanut?

BIANCA

I refer to the size of your brain!

The curtains close fully on the angry duo.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 16: Pisa prison: Early afternoon

_Set design:_ Prison bars form the backdrop of an arena entombed by stone and slate. To the sides of the large cell are benches where inmates may sit. Two small stools rest by the edge of the stage.

*^*^*

MARIA sits on a stool near the edge of the stage and uses a quill to write out a contract on a piece of paper. She is kept company by 3 jailbirds who study her intently from the sidelines.

PRISONER 1

Ever seen someone look so serious before?

PRISONER 2

Can't say that I have... This wench means business.

PRISONER 3

What are you scribbling lady friend? Do tell...

Maria looks up from her writing and directs her focused gaze at her companions.

MARIA

I am preparing an agreement to govern my marriage.

PRISONER 3

I'm so sorry I asked.

MARIA

Do not be sorry my man! Be grateful for the warning.

PRISONER 2

What?

Maria rises to her feet and holds her contract up with an air of triumph about her.

MARIA

This is your future if you do not treat your wives the way you would like to be treated. If you disrespect or abuse or neglect them, show no real love or any inclination to share the burden of daily life, then you will find yourselves alone and out of pocket.

Before the jailbirds can respond the local OFFICER leads GABRIELLE and ANDREA up to the cell bars.

GABRIELLE

Maria, your child cries for you. Will you return home and resume your duties in an obedient manner? Answer quickly woman!

Maria walks over to her husband and holds out her written agreement.

MARIA

I will return home once you have agreed to my conditions.

Gabrielle snatches the contract from Maria's hands, peruses it briefly and then scrunches the paper up into a ball.

GABRIELLE

Officer, kindly lead this woman back to my mother's home.

MARIA

Be aware Officer that when I next lock him out he may ask you to lead me back here. We could walk to and fro many times, but perhaps you enjoy my company and do not object to the exercise.

The policeman turns on Gabrielle.

OFFICER

Do you mean to waste my time sir?

GABRIELLE

It is not my intention to waste anybody's time!

OFFICER

Good! Then sign the paper and bring an end to this petty feud.

Gabrielle flares up like a wounded bull.

GABRIELLE

You have no jurisdiction to order me about!

OFFICER

No! But I may imprison you for disrupting the peace with your domestic bickering.

Gabrielle folds his arms and digs his heels in.

GABRIELLE

No intelligent business man signs an agreement without reading it.

OFFICER

Then read it. Now!

MARIA

Allow me to recite its terms Officer...

A feisty tune permeates the air as Maria and her 3 cell mates launch into a cheeky dance routine.

MARIA

(Singing)

You had this coming, straight down the line,

Now I've got you where I want you, you are mine!

You will help out, with my daily chores,

And know that I will tally up the scores...

You had this coming; it was plain to see,

The shakeup that would split you and me.

From here on out I expect a weekly wage,

Commensurate with my skills and age...

You had this coming, there is no doubt,

So don't dare to sulk and brood and pout.

You will give up those habits I detest,

And strive not to be a household pest...

And if by chance you go and break your word,

Turn against me and everything you've heard.

I'll take the house, the children and your plough,

Your vineyards, horses, goats and cow!

You had this coming, what can I say?

For all your sins you'll now have to pay.

Here's the contract printed neat and fine,

So kindly sign on the dotted line...

The officer pulls a quill from his shirt pocket and hands it across to Gabrielle. The cornered Italian scowls heavily, then opens up the contract once more and signs it with more than a little hesitation.

OFFICER & PRISONERS

(In unison)

Sign it! Sign it! Sign it! Sign it! Sign it!

Sign it! Sign it! Sign it! Sign it! Sign it!

Sign it! Sign it! Sign it! Sign it! Sign it!

With the agreement finalized the policeman opens the gate to the prison cell and allows Maria to step outside. Maria takes the quill and signed contract out of her husband's hands and passes these to the warden.

MARIA

Be so kind as to initial this document as a witness.

The policeman does as he is told. Maria then reclaims the document, rolls it up and tucks it in her blouse.

I thank you for your hospitality Officer. I pray we do not meet again.

Maria saunters off the stage while her former prison mates whistle loudly and Gabrielle succumbs to bitterness.

ANDREA

There is far more to your wife than meets the eye Gabrielle.

GABRIELLE

You state the obvious, do you not? Perhaps you should wonder if the same expression applies to your own wife.

Gabrielle stomps after Maria, and is followed closely by the local Officer. Andrea meanwhile ponders his friend's question aloud.

ANDREA

Does the same expression apply to my wife? Almost certainly... and I wouldn't have it any other way. After all, where is the sport in living with a woman who is completely transparent?

Andrea winks at the audience and then bounds off stage as the curtains close.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 17: The road from Pisa to Rome: Late afternoon

_Set design:_ The backdrop is a sun drenched view over fields of grape vines that stretch to the horizon. A road-sign bears the names "Pisa" and "Rome".

*^*^*

PETRUCHIO sits atop his horse by the roadside and gently strums a mandolin. The tune is a little romantic and a little melancholy at the same time. After a short wait KATE appears in view atop her mount. She is reading yet another book, and it seems that she will ride past her husband without noticing his presence. Petruchio stops playing his musical instrument and shakes his head from side to side in amazement.

PETRUCHIO

Tsk, tsk, tsk. Always with your head buried amongst some pages.

Kate looks up from her reading material and comes to a stop.

KATE

Oh! There you are.

PETRUCHIO

As always, waiting you for my love.

KATE

I am glad we have stopped. We can allow Grumio to catch up.

PETRUCHIO

Ah yes... the slow poke. Doubtless he is exaggerating his fatigue.

Kate laughs at her husband's relentless persecution of the page.

KATE

I do believe it is time for another wager.

Petruchio is flabbergasted by the suggestion.

PETRUCHIO

Another wager! After all the mischief the last one provoked!

KATE

I am willing to bet that you and Grumio will be the best of friends if you walk a mile in his shoes.

PETRUCHIO

And what do I get if I win this wager?

KATE

You gain a friend of course.

PETRUCHIO

And if I lose?

KATE

Then my respect for you will be a touch diminished.

Petruchio considers his options briefly.

PETRUCHIO

Very well wench: throw in a kiss with my inevitable victory and the game will commence.

KATE

Aha! Such confidence! I accept your terms sir.

A brief pause follows as Petruchio tunes his mandolin.

PETRUCHIO

Kate, I have been meaning to ask: do you not fear for your sister's safety?

KATE

My sister's safety?

PETRUCHIO

It occurs to me that her stubbornness will lead to a beating one day.

KATE

Lucentio would be well advised not to harm my sister, for she will retaliate.

PETRUCHIO

She has a venomous bite, does she not?

KATE

It can be deadly.

PETRUCHIO

Then I shall fear for your brother-in-law's safety instead.

Kate laughs at the joke.

It has just occurred to me that Bianca is much like your philosophical cave prisoner: shackled to a wall and unable to see anything around her except shadows projected onto a curtain.

KATE

Am I then the enlightened individual who attempts to guide her out of the cave towards the good life, only to be ignored and subjected to abuse?

PETRUCHIO

Perhaps _enlightened_ is too strong a word.

Kate chuckles as she reaches across to her husband and pinches him playfully.

KATE

You have some cheek!

PETRUCHIO

I have inherited that trait from my wife, I assure you!

GRUMIO staggers into view atop his mule. Once again he has a large backpack strapped to his back. He stops when he sees his employers and wipes his forehead with his sleeve.

KATE

Grumio – I am happy to see you have caught up.

GRUMIO

You are not half as happy as I am my lady.

PETRUCHIO

Allow me to assist you with your baggage Grumio.

Grumio's mouth falls open in shock as Petruchio moves up to him. The page then realizes his employer is serious and quickly slips his backpack off his shoulders. Grumio holds onto Petruchio's mandolin while the baggage transfer takes place.

KATE

Grumio, I propose we race to the next town.

GRUMIO

A race my lady!

KATE

Indeed! I want my lazy husband to fall as far behind us as possible. What say you?

GRUMIO

My lady, I would happily die for you right now.

PETRUCHIO

HA! You two rogues deserve one another.

Kate laughs as Petruchio snatches his mandolin away from his page. Grumio immediately spurs his mule into action and charges across the arena.

GRUMIO

HIYA!

KATE

My husband, we shall see you when we see you. HIYA!

Kate propels her horse forwards and whoops with joy as she chases after Grumio. Soon Petruchio is left all alone.

PETRUCHIO

(Aloud)

When will I learn? I ask with tears in my eyes!

Petruchio laughs at his predicament, then cradles his mandolin in his arms and starts to strum a romantic tune. The lights dim and the curtains close.

## THE END

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Resources for directors and producers

### Synopsis

"The Shrew Untamed" picks up Kate and Petruchio's story a year after their infamous wedding. The Shakespearean couple travels to Pisa to visit Bianca and Lucentio, and the most noticeable thing about the two is how much they've both changed. Kate, who used to be shrewish, is now a radiant and flirtatious intellectual. Petruchio meanwhile has morphed from an overbearing bully into a love-sick gentleman. Somewhere along the line a miracle must have taken place. Upon arriving in Pisa the happy couple discovers that Bianca and Lucentio are engaged in a bitter marital war. Petruchio, who is in the mood for some amusement, ends up placing a bet with Kate. Her objective is to reconcile her sister and brother-in-law within 3 days, and if she succeeds in her task then she will receive a gold coin. Kate likes the challenge and accepts Petruchio's terms.

With time being in short supply Kate outlines to her sister 3 golden rules for re-molding an undesirable husband into the perfect companion. Bianca misinterprets the advice and decides in her mind that Kate manipulates Petruchio through the art of deception. The ill-tempered young woman doesn't object to devious behavior in principle, and with a little arm twisting agrees to follow a plan laid forth by her older sister.

Meanwhile, at the local tavern, a slightly drunk Petruchio encourages his brother-in-law to mimic Bianca's shrewish behavior: after all, he used the approach on Kate and it seemed to crush her rebellious spirit. With both parties to the bad marriage now scheming it becomes inevitable that chaos will unfold, and when it does the results are slapstick funny.

If only Bianca had a sense of humor. Infuriated by everyone around her she decides to strike back by revealing Kate's 3 rules to Petruchio. Using a little deception this bitter woman turns the tables on the key players with dramatic consequences: Kate finds herself branded the "bad guy" while Petruchio slips into a state of outraged devastation. It seems the perfect marriage will now fall apart at the seams, and Kate has to use her survival skills to convince her husband that she feels genuine affection for him. Disaster is averted at the last minute, and with their commitment to one another reaffirmed the couple sets about playing a prank on their relatives. Deception or no deception, these two people share a bond that transcends the battle of the sexes.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene descriptions

"The Shrew Untamed" contains a central narrative strand and a supporting narrative strand. The supporting story dramatizes the battle of the sexes in a musical fashion. The lyrics poke fun at both sexes and their perceived flaws, while serving to place the main narrative within a broader social context.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 1: The road from Verona to Pisa: Morning

Kate and Petruchio travel to Pisa to visit Bianca and Lucentio. The journey is a long one and they stop for a rest along the roadside. Kate, who has become something of an intellectual, entices Petruchio into a short philosophical discussion by performing a striptease before him. It is clear that the two enjoy each other's company and frequently enter into competitive bets as a form of amusement. When Grumio catches up to the couple Kate instructs him to ride ahead into Pisa and warn Bianca about her imminent arrival.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 2: A drinking house in Pisa: Mid morning

(Musical subplot & main plot merged)

Gabrielle and Andrea are childhood friends who have recently returned to their home town of Pisa in order to visit relatives. The two are in a relaxed mood and soon break out into a song and dance routine in which they express their views on the idea of "the perfect woman". Gabrielle sees her as a flirtatious sex siren, while Andrea regards her as a hardworking domestic servant.

Lucentio then enters the establishment and recognizes Gabrielle and Andrea as old acquaintances of his. He greets the two men warmly, but soon finds himself the butt of a virility joke when he confesses that he is childless after a year of marriage. Gabrielle hijacks the conversation with a boast about the enormous love his wife (Maria) feels for him. The pompous man invites Andrea and Lucentio back to his home to witness the adoration that Maria bestows upon him: Lucentio understandably declines the offer.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 3: Bianca's drawing room: Midday

Bianca stands before a full length mirror and admires her reflection as Tranio pins up the hem of a new dress she has on. Lucentio interrupts Bianca's reveries moments later. He castigates his wife for not greeting him with a kiss or a perfumed meal, and then complains bitterly that his friends think less of him for being childless. Bianca, who has become the shrew that Kate once was, cruelly dismisses her husband's grievances. Petruchio and Kate arrive on the scene just as Lucentio attempts to force himself on Bianca. It is clear to the couple from Verona that they have entered an unhappy household, and it is equally apparent to Lucentio and Bianca that their relatives are happy together.

Petruchio, who is in the mood for some amusement, places a bet with Kate once they are alone. Kate's objective is to reconcile Bianca and Lucentio within 3 days. If she succeeds in her task then she will receive a gold coin.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 4: Pisa town square: Early afternoon

(Musical subplot)

Maria introduces herself to the audience through a song that reveals her unhappiness with her marriage. The woman declares that she has reached the end of her tether, and is now prepared to fight for a better life.

Gabrielle and Andrea arrive outside the villa where Gabrielle is staying, only to find themselves locked out by Maria for being drunk and late. The angry woman stands on the balcony above the front door and castigates the pair in a defiant song. War is declared, and Gabrielle retreats from the square to gather his supporters.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 5: Bianca's kitchen: Early afternoon

Kate joins Bianca in the kitchen and listens to her sister rant and rave about her disagreeable marriage. Bianca then turns to her sibling and questions whether she is genuinely content with Petruchio. Kate calmly declares that she is molding Petruchio into a good husband, and Bianca may do the same with Lucentio if she adheres to 3 golden rules. They are as follows: (1) whenever Lucentio demands something of Bianca she must ask for something in return; (2) Bianca must reward Lucentio's good behavior; (3) Bianca must exercise patience.

It is evident from Kate's speech that she takes nothing for granted and views marriage as a battlefield where only the fittest and smartest survive. To Bianca's mind Kate's ideas sound like onerous work, and she reluctantly agrees to try and implement the 3 rules. To get the ball rolling Kate instructs her sister to cook some soup for Lucentio as a goodwill gesture.

*^*^*^*^*^*

### Scene 6: A drinking house in Pisa: Mid afternoon

(Musical subplot & main plot merged)

Gabrielle storms into his favorite drinking house, followed closely by Andrea. He begs the drinkers present to support his campaign against Maria, but soon finds himself being laughed at. In a fit of anger Gabrielle stands on a table and launches into a bitter song about the deceptive games played by women. Lucentio and Petruchio enter the establishment just as Gabrielle finishes his musical diatribe. Lucentio is surprised to learn of Gabrielle's marital difficulties, and like everyone around him declines to get involved in the spat. Gabrielle retreats from the tavern in a foul mood.

As Lucentio and Petruchio get down to the business of drinking they open up and talk about their respective marriages. Lucentio begs his brother-in-law for advice on how to tame a shrewish wife: in response a mildly drunk Petruchio declares that he molded Kate into a good wife by deliberately mimicking her bad behaviors. The tipsy man encourages Lucentio to mirror Bianca's most annoying mannerisms to the point where she capitulates and reforms her demeanor.

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### Scene 7: Bianca's drawing room: Late afternoon

Petruchio and Lucentio arrive back from the drinking house, and in an effort to mimic Bianca's vanity Lucentio slips into one of his wife's dresses. A farcical scene unfolds when the unhappy husband and wife come face to face. Bianca disappears from the drawing room momentarily, then returns and empties a pot of soup over her husband's head. Lucentio storms from the room in disgust, leaving Kate to berate her husband for trying to sabotage her plans.

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### Scene 8: Pisa town square: Late afternoon

(Musical subplot)

Gabrielle and Andrea lead a police officer up to the villa that Maria has commandeered. A verbal and lyrical battle takes place before Maria makes a calculated move and surrenders to arrest.

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### Scene 9: Lucentio's bathroom: Evening

Kate shifts her attentions onto Lucentio in order to save her chances of winning the wager. She deliberately walks in on her brother-in-law while he is bathing and initiates a conversation about Bianca's temperament. Before Kate can address the subject matter fully she hears Petruchio call out for her in the distance. Kate makes Lucentio promise to meet with her in the garden the following day.

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### Scene 10: Bianca's drawing room: Morning

Bianca is still sulking about the previous night's debacle, and with spiteful intentions in her heart she decides to engineer a scenario where Petruchio finds out that he is routinely deceived by Kate.

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### Scene 11: Lucentio's wine cellar: Mid morning

Bianca surprises Lucentio in his cellar, and gleefully informs her husband that Kate's happy marriage is little more than a sham. When Lucentio challenges Bianca to provide proof of this fact she instructs him to listen in on a conversation between herself and Kate. Bianca rushes off to orchestrate her scheme, and soon sends Petruchio into the cellar on a false errand. Lucentio quickly realizes that his wife also wants Petruchio to overhear the conversation that is about to take place. He decides to play along and ushers his brother-in-law behind some casks. Moments later the two sisters enter the cellar, and Bianca carefully words a request for advice. In responding to the request Kate talks of the need for married women to hide their true feelings from their husbands. Before they leave Bianca asks her sister if she loves Petruchio: the response given by the former shrew is not one that can give her husband much comfort.

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### Scene 12: Lucentio's garden: Mid morning

Lucentio meets with Kate and sharply criticizes her for encouraging Bianca to act deceptively. Kate soon realizes that her recent conversation with Bianca was overheard by her brother-in-law and her husband. Before stalking off Lucentio gives Kate the impression that she will be expelled from the house by Petruchio. The news leaves the former shrew in a state of disarray, and she realizes that she may have a fight on her hands to preserve her marriage.

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### Scene 13: Pisa town square: Midday

Petruchio takes a seat in the town square and bemoans the loss of his marital trust. Kate enters the scene shortly after and tries to cheer up her husband. Petruchio stands erect, wraps his arms around Kate and squeezes her in a bear hug while he makes it known that he overheard her conversation with Bianca. An almost breathless Kate defends the advice given to her sister by referring to the couple's wager. Petruchio releases his wife and demands to know if she truly loves him. Kate cannot answer "yes", and this fact enrages Petruchio even more. It seems the two will split apart, but Kate is able to salvage the relationship by telling her husband that she is learning to love him. The more he treats her as an equal the closer she holds him to her heart.

After reconciling the two decide to cancel their wager and leave for Rome. Before they depart however Kate must exact revenge on her meddling sister.

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### Scene 14: Gabrielle's nursery: Midday

(Musical subplot)

Gabrielle and Andrea are forced to care for the former's infant son. The two are completely inept at babysitting and in the absence of help from a female they decide to have Maria released from prison.

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### Scene 15: Bianca's drawing room: Early afternoon

Bianca and Lucentio walk into their drawing room to find the furniture in a state of complete and utter upheaval. Kate and Petruchio stand in the center of the room and kiss passionately: when questioned by their relatives as to the appearance of the room they pretend that they both lost control during a passionate bout of love making. Kate and Petruchio then excuse themselves, leaving Bianca to ponder why her malicious scheme failed. It isn't long before she and Lucentio are engaged in another shouting match.

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### Scene 16: Pisa prison: Early afternoon

(Musical subplot)

Gabrielle approaches Maria in prison and instructs her to return home so that she may resume her parental duties. Maria refuses to move from her cell unless Gabrielle signs a contract which grants her additional rights and prohibits some of his bad behavior. When Gabrielle resists the deal put forward to him the local officer steps into the fray to bring the petty dispute to an end. Maria is released with a signed contract in her possession, and her triumph is conveyed through a vibrant and defiant song.

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### Scene 17: The road from Pisa to Rome: Afternoon

Kate and Petruchio stop for a rest by the roadside as they head towards Rome. Amidst idle banter they discuss what the future holds for Bianca and Lucentio: both believe it will be a state filled with much unhappiness. When Grumio eventually catches up with the couple Kate calls for a race to the next town, and the happy trio sets off with laughter ringing in the air.

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