 
[NADIA} Kaye, I have gone through your cupboards and got some ingredients
[KAYE] A gin and tonic...
[NADIA] You have the best gin.  You bloody do.
[KAYE] I'm  good at that
[NADIA] It's mid week
Don't know what to cook. Nothing in the fridge. Mind you that's the same for any day of the week in your house
Nothing in the fridge. Mind you that's the same for any day of the week in your house
and I've got these together and this is the easiest, most delicious, if you're
throwing it together, dish that you can do.... done in minutes
[KAYE] Ok.
[NADIA] Ok.
we've got tuna, sweet corn, you can use
frozen, pine nuts, lemon, pesto, avocado and
pasta already cooked
[KAYE] If you cook pasta and then let it cool down and heat it up again
 
Apparently it's really good
because it makes it a complex carbohydrate
and you don't have os much sugar in it
 
[NADIA] So, I'm just going to put this pasta in the bowl
You like this dish don't you Mark
[KAYE] For how many people?
[NADIA] This would be four to six portions
[KAYE] ... because Tuna is quite expensive...
Two tins...
[NADIA] You can use one
No, no, no, no!
Leave it on
and then take it over to the sink
drain it and squeeze it because that
kind of the little details which make your food
food awful... is that you'll sort just bung the tin in with half the water still in it
Show me what you do with your tin
[KAYE] Right, don't be condescending I know how to drain bloody tuna
[NADIA] Show me what I just showed you
[KAYE] Oh god.
[NADIA] That's it. Squeeze it.
Squeeeeeze it.
[KAYE] I like some tomato sauce on my tuna usually
[NADIA] Honestly this is so good this dish
[KAYE] See I usually use fresh ingredients in mine
You just go pretend do you?
[NADIA] This is a store cupboard emergency
Right sweetcorn
Same thing. Get rid of all that water otherwise it will ruin the dish
 
[KAYE] I'm really enjoying this
[NADIA LAUGHS]
 
[NADIA] What's nice about this is you can put in a big bowl in the fridge
Put it in .. and then people snack on it or you can put it in school, school, school packed lunch box
[MARK] In school what?
[NADIA] P..P...P...Pack Pack Pack
[NADIA SINGS AN AWFUL TRIBUTE TO THE WORDS "PACKED LUNCH"
[KAYE] That's going to catch on.
[KIKI] Don't sing.
[NADIA] Sorry darling
Ever since I've had children I've never ben allowed to sing
[KAYE] No, I'm not allowed to sing either
 
[NADIA] That's the only thing I truly loved about
Big Brother, being the Big Brother house, is that I could sing my heart out
[KAYE] I know.
I am quite sad about that in the car
[NADIA] Pesto..
[KAYE] All of it?
Well I tell you what..
I need to be convinced of this one
[NADIA] Okay
[KAYE] I think I'd rather have my Quorn burger with roasted squash
[NADIA] We need our avocado and if your kids don't like avocado, just don't put it in
[KAYE] It's very salty that Pesto
[NADIA] Yeah, but we've got so much pasta
[NADIA] Avocado, glug of olive oil
[KAYE] Are you sure?
[NADIA] This is a massive dish. Look this
could feed ten people
[KAYE] It started off as four to six...  and now it's ten!
Is it the magic porridge pot or what?
[NADIA] I'm tribal. You watch. You'll be eating this all week.
[KAYE] This dish
could feed sixteen to eighteen
or put the avocado in and this dish could feed
46 to 50
 
Very sleek. That's the way I do it.
[NADIA] Yeah, right.
God, this is vast
[KAYE] How may do you think it'll feed
[NADIA] Twenty people!
[NADIA LAUGHS]
[KAYE] It's a metaphor for your life  this dish..
.. you exaggerate about everything
[NADIA] I do.
[KAYE] ... so wildly
[NADIA] Have you got any black pepper?
Not yet!
Don't eat it yet
Zest of a lemon
 
Scent of a woman
[MARK] Zest of a Lemon, I love it
[NADIA] Zest of a Lemon
[KAYE] Zest of a Lemon, Scent of a Woman
I think I put a whole packet of pasta in when I was supposed to put half...
[KAYe] We're going to put
this pasta on eBay
[NADIA] This is what happens when I drink gin before i've actually started cooking
[KAYE] That was a very expensive bag of pasta I gave you there
[NADIA] It was lovely
[KAYE] It was very good quality
 
 
[NADIA] I bet your kids don't eat pine nuts do they..
[KAYE] Yeah! She's getting better actually with that
[NADIA] I think I should take some out
 
 
You don't have to toast these if you can't be bothered
 
[KAYE] Are you going to use them all?!
[NADIA] Just to annoy you
[MARK] We are feeding 18
[NADIA] It is dinner for 30.
You haven't got any olives have you?
 
Okay so now I'm going to put the pine nuts... okay that was a lot of pine nuts
 
 
Voila. Done
[NADIA] Ten minutes
[KAYE] That's not bad
That's lovely parmesan, that.
[NADIA] Go on then, try it.
Make sure you get a bit of everything
Bit of olive,
bit of pine nut, bit of avocado
 
 
 
[NADIA] Did you get an olive?  Pop an olive in your mouth too
[KAYE] Do you just serve this hot or cold?
[NADIA] She says reluctantly... Hot or cold. As I
say I do a big bowl of that and they take it for packed lunches
How many do you think this would feed?
[NADIA] Four hundred and fifty two.
