

God's Laws:

Law Of Desire

By

Jesus (AJ Miller)

Published by

Divine Truth, Australia at Smashwords

http://www.divinetruth.com/

Copyright 2015 Divine Truth

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

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This ebook is a transcript of a seminar delivered by Jesus (AJ Miller) on 21st February 2010 in Buderim, Queensland Australia, as part of the God's Laws series. In this seminar Jesus discuss the fundamentals of the Law of Desire; how what we desire, we create, how following loving desires results in joy while following unloving desires results in pain, and how fear inhibits desire.

Reminder From Jesus & Mary

Jesus and Mary would like to remind you that any document produced by Divine Truth containing any information from Jesus, Mary or any other person includes only a portion of God's Truth that they have personally discovered.

It does not and cannot contain the entire of God's Truth since God's Truth is infinite and humankind will forever continue to discover more of God's Truth as we progress in receiving more of God's Love.

Please remember that due to these limitations information contained within this document may need to be revised in the future.

Many other ebooks have been published by Divine Truth, including ebooks translated into a variety of different languages.

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Table of Contents

The Law of Desire: Part 1

1. Introduction

1.1. Receiving God's Love is dependent upon the Law of Desire

1.2. Introduction to desire

1.3. The importance of understanding desire

2. Acting upon loving desires results in joy while acting upon unloving desires results in pain

2.1. An example of a participant feeling pain after speaking the truth

2.2. Different types of pain

2.3. Determining the purity of desire

2.4. The importance of acting upon desires

2.4.1. Reasons for not acting upon desires

2.5. An example of AJ saying he's Jesus

The Law of Desire: Part 2

3. What we desire, we create

3.1. An example of desiring money

3.2. An example of entering a relationship in order to be loved

3.3. Loving and truthful desires create joy, while unloving and untruthful desires create pain

3.4. An example of desiring money (continued)

3.5. Steps in recognising the cause of our creations

3.6. An example of a participant who had been embezzled

3.7. Being honest about our creations

3.8. An example of pushing away our soulmate

3.9. An example of creating illness in another person

3.9.1. Controlling others through emotional hooks

3.9.2. An example of a participant feeling guilty for potentially creating her husband's illness

3.9.3. An example of AJ creating illness in his life

3.9.4. An example of a participant feeling guilty for potentially creating her husband's illness (continued)

4. Fear inhibits desire

4.1. Desire grows with soul growth

4.2. Releasing fear exposes desire

4.2.1. An example of a participant who is afraid she is like her parents

4.3. The benefits of releasing fears and other erroneous emotions

4.3.1. An example of meeting our soulmate

4.3.2. An example of money issues

4.4. Recognising our fears

4.4.1. Being honest about not wanting to progress towards God

4.4.2. Praying to God to see truth

5. Audience questions

5.1. Pure desires do not require others to be involved

5.1.1. An example of a couple with different desires

5.2. Pure desires can manifest rapidly

5.3. Beliefs about desire on Earth

5.4. Naturally acting upon desires

5.5. Desire is a prayer to God

5.6. An example of a participant desiring to make women feel wanted

5.7. An example of a couple with different desires (continued)

5.7.1. Meeting our soulmate by following desires

The Law of Desire: Part 1

1. Introduction

If you want to enjoy your life, one of God's Primary Laws to understand is the Law of Desire. You could call it also perhaps the Law of Passion, and I don't use passion in the negative sense of crisis, but rather passion in the sense of having huge passionate desire. This law is a major part of our soul being activated and if we don't understand how it influences us emotionally and spiritually and influences our relationship with God, often we will flounder and many, many times be feeling quite despondent on the Divine Love Path. You receiving God's Love in fact is totally about this law.

1.1. Receiving God's Love is dependent upon the Law of Desire

Let's look at how that works: here's your soul and here's God's Soul. What causes God's Love to enter your soul? Having a desire for it. The desire for Divine Love causes the Holy Spirit - God's Active Force, is of the highest order and in fact it is the way God transmits Her Love to Her Children - therefore it's the highest possible force and that's why in the spirit world we call it the Holy Spirit, because it's the highest possible active force of God. That Holy Spirit connects to your soul through this aspect of desire - that's what it means to have a longing for Divine Love. It means to have a desire, a passionate desire to be loved by God and also of course to love God.

Now remember there were three things we need on the Divine Love Path to progress. Do you remember what those three things primarily are? A longing for Divine Love; a longing for Divine Truth and what's the third?

Participant: Humility.

Receiving Love from God requires a desire for Divine Love

What's humility? It's actually a longing to experience your own emotions - a passionate desire to experience your own emotion. Can you see in each case how much desire is in place? And can you see too if I don't have a desire for instance to feel my own emotions then straight away I'm blocking emotion. If I don't have a desire to experience Divine Truth then I'm blocking Truth. If I don't have a desire to receive Divine Love then I'm never going to able to receive Divine Love because it's desire that activates God's Soul. Your desire activates God's Soul. When your desire is harmonious with love, truth and emotion, your desire accesses God's Soul.

Now that's pretty powerful really to understand and ponder about because all of these people say how complicated it is and how much mediation you've got to do to connect with God and become blissful - you've got to medicate three to four hours - not medicate, meditate (Laughter) probably interchangeable words but anyway! - meditate three to four hours a day to receive Divine Love and so forth. In reality it's not about the meditation and the blanking yourself out or anything, it's about your passionate desire.

1.2. Introduction to desire

When you think about it, every time anyone around you has a passionate desire, don't you find it quite wonderful? Do you find that sort of resonates with you in your soul when somebody else has a passionate desire? For instance someone's got a passionate desire for their motor car. You just sit back sometimes and just smile at yourself when you hear them express their desire - don't you? - Because it just amazes: it's amazing the transformation of the person that occurs when they connect with that passionate desire.

That happens in all sorts of aspects of their life; for instance a passionate desire to have a family: now there'll be a high likelihood that this family will be brought up in a manner that's harmonious with love. If you don't really care about having children and you have one, how do you feel then? Not very passionately desirous of having the child so therefore there is this blockage to actually then having the child grow up with an environment of love. [00:06:26.11]

Desire enters every aspect of your being if you think about it. Now why do you eat something? Because there's this feeling inside that generates a feeling that I want to have something inside of me - food - to fill it. Now sometimes that feeling will be an emotional injury but it's still based around a desire that drives you: so in the end it's a desire that is driving even the desire to eat food because if you didn't have that desire, would you bother eating? Probably not.

Imagine if God made you so that you felt full all the time. You'd look at this great big beautiful platter of fruit, vegetables and other dishes, and you'd look at it and you'd go, "Okay" and then walk off. Now if your body needed food but you didn't have a desire for it at all, what's going to happen to your body eventually? It will just wither away and who knows - sometimes it depends on how connected with God - it might take a few years, but other times just a few months and you're pretty much a skeleton. That's what anorexia is all about: the resistance to food due to emotional reasons. So of course it's desire that generates even desire for food.

Of course we can have desires that are disharmonious with love and truth or we can have desires that are harmonious with love and truth. We can have either. Now when we act upon the ones that are disharmonious with love and truth, they have a certain flavour in terms of their result compared with desires that are harmonious with love and truth, and we'll talk about the different flavour that results from those two desires.

1.3. The importance of understanding desire

You can see how if we want to connect to - even to God - and receive Divine Love, which is the transforming thing that transforms our soul, we're going to need to understand desire. We're going to need to understand what affects desire, what controls desire within us, and how we can grow desire. We're going to need to understand those things, because if we don't understand those things, how are we going to grow this connection with God if it's all based on desire? So the Law of Desire is a really important thing to understand and desire and passion is something very important to develop within yourself.

2. Acting upon loving desires results in joy while acting upon unloving desires results in pain

Now a few weeks ago I asked you to actually have an attempt to feel some of your desires \- I know some of you did that - to feel some of your desires and start acting upon them, and one of the things you would have noticed is that when you started acting upon desires that were harmonious with love you automatically felt some more joy in your life as a result. This is something that we need to come to understand - that when we act upon our desires that are harmonious with love and truth then joy results: it's an automatic result when we act upon desires harmonious with love and truth.

So if we want to have joy or happiness in our life we must discover our desire and this proviso is that we want to make sure it is harmonious with love and truth, and then we want to act upon it. If we do all of that we'll have joy. So you could say joy equals discovering your desire plus making sure it is harmonious with love and truth and then acting upon it. We add those three together; joy will result in our lives.

Let's write another equation, pain equals discovering desire that is disharmonious with love and truth and acting upon it. Can you see it's almost the same equation with one primary difference? The primary difference is the harmony with Divine Love and Truth.

So if we look at this aspect of joy and we look at this aspect of pain, we see that God automatically created a feedback system. Do you understand what I mean by a feedback system? In electronics a feedback system is used to stop things from going into squealing at you. So for example you know the sound system here, this sound system has a thing called a phase lock loop amplifier, which is getting my voice and putting it into an electronic signal. And what it does with my signal is it amplifies my signal but to stop the signal from being amplified so much that it blows up the amplifier; there's a feedback system there that makes sure that it's kept within a certain range. This is what God has done with our desire; God has given us a feedback system so that we can actually see where the range of our desire that is safe to us and the range of our desires that is unsafe to us; and the feedback system is joy and pain. [00:13:01.01]

So when I'm feeling pain my feedback system is telling me that there is something about my desire here that is out of harmony with love and truth. So for example quite often people come up and say to me, "Oh we've just broken up from a relationship and I'm devastated, I'm devastated that we've just broken up. I want them to be with me but they don't want me and I feel really devastated." So would you classify devastation as a joy or a pain?

Audience: A pain.

Okay so we've got pain. So we know we're in the pain so straight away we know because of the pain that there must be something about a desire - that is disharmonious with love and truth - that I have, that would cause me to feel this pain. Otherwise I wouldn't feel the pain of this breakup. People then say to me, "That makes no sense to me at all." They say, "If I love them of course I'm going to feel pain." And I say, "Well no, that's not true at all because every time we have pain we are doing something in disharmony with love and truth. That can't be true: if you love someone it doesn't automatically result in pain, in fact if you love somebody whether they love you back or not, it should result in your pleasure."

2.1. An example of a participant feeling pain after speaking the truth

Participant: Well how does that work when you have a desire to speak truth? Last night I decided to speak truth to a guy that I've known for a couple of years and I decided to tell him that I feel he needs attention from me. So that was my desire to be more honest with him but then it resulted in me feeling pain in a way because he couldn't understand why I felt he was needy ...

So what we're saying is you tried this equation of "discover desire + harmony with love and truth + act upon the desire = joy" and what ended up was the pain equation for you. So the pain equation you started with what you believed was a pure desire, desire to speak the truth. Is that desire harmonious with love and truth? Yes of course it is. And you acted upon it, did you not? Yes. And yet you still got pain.

Participant: Is that just because I have got an injury within me that I need to release?

I'll tell you what's happening. The desire to speak truth was a pure desire and it wasn't that desire that caused you the pain. Because this equation of "discover desire + harmony with love and truth + act upon the desire = joy" always causes joy. You were in that equation, so the pain must be the result of another desire.

Participant: Now I wish I didn't ask this question! (Laughter) Oh no!

So what's the real desire that you felt the pain about? You gave the clue in your statement.

Participant: Oh maybe that he misunderstood me.

He misunderstood me. So what was my desire? I wanted him to understand.

Now is that desire harmonious with truth and love?

Participant: No.

Why?

Participant: Because that's me having an expectation.

Yes. And that was the cause of your pain. Can you see the difference?

Participant: Yep.

You see a lot of times what we do with our emotions is we think we're in this equation of "discover desire + harmony with love and truth + act upon the desire = joy" but the pain is telling us we're in a totally different equation. There are lots of realisations happening here, so that's very good.

You see a lot of times we want to tell ourselves that we're doing something with a pure desire and a lot of times we do actually act upon a pure desire but at the same time we have another desire playing that is not so pure and it's that desire that caused us the pain - not the truth desire.

You see this is why the feedback system is very good because we can see, "I'm in pain: I must have had a desire that was out of harmony with truth and love. I need to discover it. I need to know what that desire was, because if my desire was harmonious with truth and love I wouldn't feel the pain of it by its expression."

So you can start seeing now that oftentimes we tell ourselves we're in this equation "discover desire + harmony with love and truth + act upon the desire = joy" but the result is equalling pain, which is telling us automatically that we're not in that equation, we're in something else. [00:18:10.21]

2.2. Different types of pain

Participant: AJ I find that this area is very tricky because for a good part of my life I thought I was in the first equation. I would act upon certain desires that I would have to the best of my ability at the time. I thought I was in harmony with love and truth, and I'd act upon the desire and it wouldn't equal pain, it would actually bring results. It would bring positive results whether it was filling me up emotionally or producing results in the physical, but I realise the pain was suppressed.

Let's define pain. Pain is anything that causes you pain in your long term future, in your short term future, in your current state, in your physical body, in your spirit body, or in your soul. That's fairly comprehensive, isn't it? You see what we do most of the time on Earth is we only look at the physical or the immediate emotional benefits to what we do but we have very little consideration of the longer term effects. So how did I just define pain? As long term, short term, immediate, physical, emotional, spiritual or soul-based pain.

Now many people say to me, "Oh I'm doing everything in harmony with love and truth all my life and look I've got cancer now." Now that's telling you the pain is in this case a physical pain, and we're doing things out of harmony with love and truth. Whether we know it or not is immaterial. Or I've got an ache in my leg, what's that? A physical pain, so straight away I know I'm out of harmony.

Emotional pain might be you're in a relationship and the relationship breaks up. For instance I've been in the relationship for five years and I've just found out he was cheating on me. "We had such a happy relationship." I'm sorry but that's not true. That's what you'd like to believe for five years obviously but if he was cheating on you for five years your relationship was completely fake and therefore for five years we've been experiencing pain that we've been ignoring because the truth is if I was emotionally connected with this person - man or woman - I would know something's wrong. So therefore I wasn't emotionally connected with them, and I was ignoring the emotional connection because I'm ignoring my emotional pain, and sooner or later some other pain occurs and that shows me that I was in ignorance in the end.

2.3. Determining the purity of desire

So sooner or later pain will come to my life if I'm in a state of disharmony with something. You can measure it immediately only if you are in a completely open emotional state. Other than that you will never be able to measure the pain immediately, and in fact the majority of times you will even feel some of your pain is good because in the end a lot of us have addictions. We'll talk about addictions at another time for a full discussion. But the truth is that if I have an unhealed emotional addiction inside of myself I am already in a state of pain.

So let's say I'm alone and I've got no one in my life, and my addiction is I've got to have someone in my life, I've got to always have a man or a woman in my life for me to be happy. Now if I just sat by myself in this state where I'm alone, I would be able to feel that pain if I'm honest with myself but most of us are not very honest with ourselves because we want to avoid our pain. That's called denial, which is a totally different subject to what we're discussing about.

Denial is when we choose to avoid our pain in order to receive something. So if I'm in a state of denial what I will do is I'll go out and enter a relationship that I think I desire, I will think that my desire is harmonious with love and truth even perhaps, but it's not because it began from an addiction, which if I'd been sitting down by myself and just feeling, I would have felt it as pain.

You see a lot of the times we start to feel our pain and then what do we do with that? We want someone else to make it go away; and not just someone else. Why do you think alcohol abuse is such a big problem? Because we often choose something else or someone else to make our pain go away. The truth is if you were in a state of bliss do you think you'd want to go and take some ecstasy every night? Why would you want to do that if you're already in a state of bliss? Can you see I'm exercising a desire but the truth is right before I exercise desire I'm not even allowing myself to feel my own pain yet.

If I exercise a desire, even if I think it's harmonious with love and truth, and I'm starting from a position of pain, things are not going to work out so well because I'm going to be exercising a desire that's disharmonious with love and truth; because let's define disharmonious with love and truth - every time I deny my own soul's emotions I am in disharmony with love and truth. So I can think that I'm living in passion and desire but often not be living in passion and desire that's harmonious with love and truth.

Quite often we can have exactly the same desire and yet one results in pain and the other in pleasure. The reason why is if we begin the desire from a place of pain we will always result in more pain.

Let me illustrate that. I might have a desire to give you the Divine Truth. Is that a pure desire or not? Well it may not be, because what's my intention? See if my intention is to manipulate and control you for the rest of your life and make you dependant on me, for a start I'm not giving you Divine Truth anymore: but if that were my desire then the results are going to be pain. And yet I could say to you, "I'm here giving this love and truth to you, isn't this wonderful? Aren't I a wonderful person? It's so lovely," and all of those kinds of things and you could even begin feeling that and yet in the end I might have an intention that's damaging. And if my intention is such that I want to exercise my desire for my personal gain, in terms of my being glorified or whatever, then straight away my desire is out of harmony with love and truth and that will result in pain for me. [00:26:48.22]

So we need to actually allow ourselves to examine our desire and see the difference between it being in harmony with love and truth and being out of harmony with love and truth. Sometimes we can seduce ourselves. Do you know what it's like to be seduced? Some of you might have been sexually seduced in your life or seduced into a business that eventually went bad or seduced into doing something when you were a child. Remember during your teenage years when you went out and did something that later turned out to be pretty stupid and you felt pretty embarrassed about? Often we get seduced by peer pressure into doing things.

In the end what we really get seduced with is our own addiction. Every time we're seduced we are not in a state of love and truth and we're also not in a state of pure desire because we're just doing really what somebody else wanted us to do and that's pointless on this path.

What you want to do is work out what you want to do and then do that. If that's harmonious with love and truth then you're going to experience the joy of acting upon that and if that's disharmonious with love and truth you're going to experience the sorrow that results from acting upon that.

2.4. The importance of acting upon desires

Participant: Hi AJ. Something I've done a bit in my life, and I really don't want to do anymore, is having a desire probably in both of those equations, in harmony or out of harmony and not acting. Can you talk about that?

Yes. It's very important to act upon your desire for a lot of reasons. You see if you act upon a desire that you believe to be harmonious with love and truth, the effect part - pain or joy - will tell you whether it was harmonious with love and joy or not. But if you choose not to act at all, how are you ever going to know whether your desires were harmonious with love and truth at all?

Participant: Yeah that's a pretty painful place.

It is a very painful place. When we don't act, that is because of terror and fear and that is telling us that we actually do have terror and fear inside of us that we need to address.

2.4.1. Reasons for not acting upon desires

Now what would be some reasons or some fear-based reasons of why you wouldn't want to act? Do you want to give some personal feelings about that?

Participant: A fear of making a mistake or doing the wrong thing.

Let's look at making a mistake, that was the first one. Doing the wrong thing. Where would that have come from? What happened when you were little and you made a mistake? I know what happened to me - most of the time it was the corporal punishment system when you made a mistake. I was there at school, writing with my left hand and every time somebody caught me doing it, I received a whack across the fingers. So I had made a mistake, and I should write with my right hand now.

So straight away a fear of making mistakes comes from this feeling inside of me that I'm going to be punished and hurt. So that needs to be released emotionally from me before I'm going to act. Or you could choose to act and allow that fear to pop up straight away, because it will pop up pretty much straight away.

Participant: Yeah I'm hoping to do that in the near future, from now on.

So there are a few different ways you can handle the system, knowing that if you act there is always going to be a result. Now if the result is pain and we think we were acting harmoniously with love and truth, then there has to be some disharmony in there for there to be some pain.

2.5. An example of AJ saying he's Jesus

I'll give you an example. I've decided that I'm going to act in harmony with love and truth all my life so what I'm going to do is I'm going to tell everybody that I'm Jesus. This was a decision I made five years ago or so because that's who I am and so I've just got to tell everyone the truth. So I go to the first persons and tell them the truth: that was my boys - my two sons Tristan and Caleb - and they reacted pretty well. There was not too much drama there and Caleb said to me, "Yeah I think it's probably right actually." And Tristan said, "Well I'll give you three months and we can work it out." But either way it was pretty even handed, there was no physical pain for me. That was interesting. [00:31:38.01]

So I go along to the next person, tell them the truth, that's my mother, as she had come to visit, and now there's a fair bit coming at me. So there's some condescension and then there's worry, where I can feel her going into this state of, "Oh no he's going to kill someone or kill himself," or whatever, "There's going to be a Kool aid thing down the track somewhere." Like all those kind of things coming up for her inside of her emotionally, of course she never voiced any of these things aside from some of the condescension and some of the worry about my state of mind. I came away from that feeling that was quite painful. What was my problem?

The pain wasn't the result of me saying the truth, the pain was a result of me getting rejected. So I then had to go and feel the rejection because that's the emotional error that I need to release, and the pain was a result of me being treated condescendingly by my mother. So I had to actually go into that emotion because that's been there a lot of my life too. So I had to go into that emotion and release that emotion.

Another painful part of it was that she then decided it was too much for her to handle and she wanted to tell some other people about it, who then got her to tell some psychiatrists about it, who then got on to tell my doctor about it, who then, when I went in to get an insurance assessment so I'd get some extra loans, he denied my assessment, which meant that my business just went bang. That was quite painful.

What was my problem? Why was it painful to lose my business? Because I'd built up three and half or four million dollars worth of property, I thought I was going quite well and was going to keep going for a little bit longer and finish off some deals and whatever else. It was painful because I didn't want to feel all of that was a waste. I just didn't want to feel an emotion. So I had to feel that emotion and then I had to feel the emotion of being betrayed by my mother: I had to feel that emotion.

Can you see those painful emotions weren't the result of me acting in harmony with love and truth? They were actually the result of me having an unhealed emotional error in me that was confronted by the act of truth, and that was the result of the pain. So I had to feel the pain.

See a lot of times what happens is we go and tell the truth with the expectations that we currently have emotionally involved with that and when those expectations are not met we feel the pain of the expectation not being met: that's telling me that it was great that I told the truth but some of my other desires - the expectations that I had - were in this category of discovering desire + disharmony with love and truth + acting = pain. [00:34:35.09]

The Law of Desire: Part 2

3. What we desire, we create

The next thing I'd like to talk about with you is this principle that's a part of the Law of Desire, and that is: what I desire I personally create. Now of course this applies just as much to your desires that are disharmonious with love as it does to the desires that are harmonious with love because what you desire that's disharmonious with love you will also create.

So for example if I desire to control and manipulate you, and that's a real desire within me, then I will finish up creating that: in other words what will happen is the people who will be attracted to me are people who desire to be controlled and manipulated and I'll be perfectly happy with the situation - and so will they, in many cases.

If I desire in a pure manner, in a loving manner and based on truth, then whatever that desire is will be created.

3.1. An example of desiring money

Then people say, "I desire lots of money, how come I haven't got that?" Because what I desire I create. Can you see it's like a feedback system for you as well? You say you want plenty of money but what you desire you create, so if you really did desire plenty of money, then you would have already created it.

Let's look at that issue, which is part of the Law of Abundance, which is a different law, but let's look at how it works.

If I made the statement, "What I desire I create" and let's put in, "What I truly desire I create"; remember the desire is not something that you can manufacture in your mind; desire has to be a pure thing coming from your soul. When I say a pure thing it doesn't have to be based on harmony or disharmony with truth - it can be either: it can be in harmony with truth, in disharmony with truth, in harmony with love, or in disharmony with love. It doesn't matter whether it's harmonious with love or truth, what matters is that it's a real feeling you have. Is it a real desire that you have and if it's a real desire it is what you truly desire at the soul level, so let's include that in our description, "What I truly desire I create (at the soul level).

So if right now I am not creating enough money for me to live on, but I'm doing what I feel is everything harmonious with love and truth, then I mustn't really desire money. What might be some of the reasons why I might not desire it? Well I might have a belief that money is control and I don't want to control people. Can you see that belief will be actually affecting my desire? I might have a thing where I believe money is power, and I don't want to have power, and so therefore I will reject money. I might have a belief that money is evil: this is a very big Christian belief, that money is evil. Do you know that the Bible actually says, "The love of money is the source of all evil"? It doesn't actually say that money is evil but anyway most people miss out the love bit and turn it into just the money being evil.

Now can you see that if I have those belief systems that are a part of my soul, so they're what's truly in my soul, what am I going to create? I'm going to create a lot of lack of money in my life. So you can actually find out through this Law of Desire what your true desires actually are by seeing the results of them in your life. So if we say then - there is another law called the Law of Cause and Effect that I haven't talked about much with you – but let's say here is the general principle: what I desire I create. So you could say then the creation is the effect of my desire. So if what I desire I create, then if I look at my creations and if I'm unhappy with them, I need to have a look at how my real desires are affecting these creations. [00:06:11.02]

So we can use examples in a lot of areas of life with this with regard to our desires and passions. You see a lot of times we say we have a pure desire for something but our desire is actually very, very different to what we believe it to be.

3.2. An example of entering a relationship in order to be loved

For example many people enter a relationship in order to be loved: what they do is they find a person who is willing to love them and then they shower them with all of their love - now obviously this relationship may or not be a soulmate relationship but most people think it is one - but the truth is what's creating it is this desire to be loved and that's going to create a situation where I'm loved in the manner in which I want to be loved, which in most cases is not actually real love. So that's going to be my creation. I'm going to feel quite happy about it until the guy goes off and cheats on me. And then I'll realise that I wasn't as loved as I thought I should be, and then I go and get rid of him and find another guy who will give me the love that I want, or another girl - just replace the gender.

Now in each case what I'm not understanding is what I truly desired I created. Firstly I created a relationship that was all about me being loved; I also created his infidelity through my actions. When I say created - obviously he had a part of that - but I created the attraction of a person who was going to be unfaithful to me. In most cases this is what's going on and then on top of that I then had another creation which was to expel him out of my life and go and get another guy who would love me the way I wanted. In all of those things I am creating what I truly desired.

3.3. Loving and truthful desires create joy, while unloving and untruthful desires create pain

So if I change my desire I will change my creations. You see most of us don't want to do that because most of us have a feeling that we don't want to bring our desires into harmony with Divine Love or into harmony with truth. So what we want to do is hold on to our distorted desire because we want to feel that that's the real thing we want, and we don't want to change those distorted desires to suit what God designed us to have. So what we finish up then doing is creating a whole heap of things - as per our previous equation - that cause us pain. And if I'm honest with myself and say to myself, "Alright what I desire I create," then obviously if I'm creating things that cause me pain or cause other people pain, my desires are out of harmony with love and truth. It's quite simple, I can feel that.

A desire that is disharmonious with love and truth creates pain

The opposite also is the truth, and that is if I have a desire that is harmonious with love and truth I'm always going to create things that are going to bring me joy. So the result is going to be joy under those circumstances.

A desire that is harmonious with love and truth will create joy

Now that means then that you have complete control over the joy you experience; not using the New Age methods of changing your mind, but rather by actually bringing your desires into harmony with truth and love. That's how you create joys in your life.

So if I'm in a state where I'm not feeling very joyous in my life, I need to start examining my desires and start looking at the desires that are not harmonious with love and the desires that are harmonious with love, and all the reasons why I don't want to act upon my desires. Because if I act upon my desires I will always create something and if that thing I created brings me joy then it was obvious that it must be harmonious with truth and love in that particular moment: that's the thing that I need to understand with regard to desire.

Desire is so important in every aspect of your life, even your relationship with God is based upon it, as we've seen just in the previous part of our discussion. And if you look at it, your relationship with your partner is also totally dependent upon desire. [00:11:01.13]

3.4. An example of desiring money (continued)

Participant: I think where I get unstuck is what you said about the truth of my desire but also my belief. I have a belief that I don't deserve money because when I was about eight I asked my dad if I could have some pocket money and he screamed at me and said, "How dare you ask me for money! Don't you get everything that you want?" And of course as a little girl I didn't have the gumption to turn around and say, well no, that's why I'm asking you for pocket money. But it did set me up very strongly that I didn't deserve money and I wasn't allowed to ask for more money.

Participant: So once I found that out then I realised that just having a desire to have more money wasn't going to do it but I still haven't been able to get right into that causal, even though I really don't want a lot of money. I don't know whether I've ever had a true desire to have heaps of money but I would like to have a little bit more than what I've got so that I can go and have some fun occasionally.

You see, you're not telling the truth.

Participant: Yeah well see this is the thing, the time before last you talked about God's Truth and our truth.

Well you're not even telling your truth.

Participant: Yeah, and I'm stuck trying to tell any kind of truth. That is the truth.

The truth is (laughter) - now you've told the truth - but the truth is this about the money issue for you. What you currently have created is what you wanted. That's the truth. So if that's the case, what you've got now is a lack of funds isn't it?

Participant: Yes.

Okay so what I've got now is a lack of funds - a lack of money shall we say. If that's what I have created, under this law basically what I'm saying is what you truly desired you created, so what you truly desired is a lack of money.

Participant: So how do I get to the causal to get rid of that?

It's really easy, all you've got to do is ask yourself this question, "Why would I do that?" (Laughter) What are the reasons that you can see straight away why you'd want to create a lack of money?

Participant: It's probably a comfort zone, it's what I know.

Okay, so you're basically saying fear is one way, you're actually afraid of having more. Okay so that's one, but go on.

Participant: I really don't know - if I do know I don't know how to express it.

Yeah you do know.

Participant: Do I?

Yeah, yeah, everybody knows the reason why.

Participant: Okay. I don't deserve it.

Okay there's another good one. So I don't deserve it, okay. Any others you can feel? [00:14:44.15]

Participant: Well it feels like I didn't receive the response that I thought I was going to get from my father ...

Now you're getting more closer. What was the response you got?

Participant: Well anger.

So what's the relationship between wanting money and a father's approval?

Participant: Well there was none. I was shocked with the response that I got from him.

So daddy doesn't love me if I want money.

Participant: Yeah, but then on the other hand he was the one who yelled at me again when I left my husband and said, "You've just thrown your security away!" (Laughter)

Yeah but that's a whole different issue to money isn't it? Now you're raising a separate issue. This is what we often do by the way. We throw in a furphy to get us away from the real issue.

Participant: Okay well we'll forget that furphy.

I'd call that one a furphy. It might be an issue you have emotionally, true, but it's not an issue related to this specific problem. This specific problem is: you have a lack of money and you desire it. You've got to own that you desire it before you can ask yourself the question of why would I desire it? And when I ask the question of why would I desire it, I start listing the reasons why I desire a lack of money. These reasons need to emotionally leave me before money will come into my life. And anything else you do - you can work your guts out, have three jobs, do whatever you want - at the end of the day anything else you do will cause a continual lack of money or your own exhaustion, one of the two. Because obviously if you feel like you have a lack of money, often people get driven into being a workaholic so eventually they get money but what happens in the rest of their life? That all falls to bits too. So you don't want that happening either, you want to have abundance but also happiness, don't you?

Participant: Yes.

Okay, so this Daddy doesn't love me if I want money issue is a very big one for you. So let's translate that into - God doesn't love you if you have money either. This is a big multigenerational injury on the planet. "Happy are the meek since they will inherit the Earth." And you know what a lot of people interpret that to be? Happy are the poor since they will inherit the Earth. Now there's a whole big difference between the word meek and the word poor. We don't often understand the difference and often it's mistranslated as a difference as well and so we come up with these beliefs. You have a lot more beliefs about money. "Money is evil. I'm evil if I want it."

These are all beliefs; they are all emotions that need to be released before abundance will appear. So with myself I had heaps of them. Then I did the whole intellectual thing for a while. So what I did for a while was I was always fine with spending money. (Laughter) In other words I'm generous when I have it, so if I have it I spend it usually on other people generally, so I have no problem with spending it.

By the way a lot of you do have problems with spending money. A lot of you get it and then you want to hoard it. Why? You might have a hundred grand sitting around, why do you want to hoard it? That hundred thousand dollars could be creating things for you, really beautiful things in your life, lots of different things in your life if you spend it. And you want to hoard it. Why do you want to hoard it? Because you're afraid of your own financial insecurity, that's the only reason why you want to hoard it. So look at that emotionally, there are emotions there. But then a lot of us also have a rejection of money, in other words we're fine spending it, but we're not fine getting it.

Participant: I lost my key card the other day so I reckon this one's up for grabs because I went to buy some bikkies and stuff to bring here today and I had no money, I couldn't get at my money.

Okay. So this is definitely something for you to look at emotionally. There are some deep childhood, mum and dad emotions involved in a lack of money.

Participant: I understand now that when I did ask dad about the pocket money, his response was from fear because he didn't have any spare money and he was in a great deal of fear at the time around money.

And you don't get daddy's love if you ask for money. But there is also for many people an equation of if somebody gives me money it means they love me.

Participant: Yeah I'm concerned about that too at the moment, that I'm doing some things for the wrong reasons.

Where you're giving some of your money away trying to get people's love.

Participant: Yeah I've done that a lot with my kids. To my detriment I've given them money but now on the other hand I'm feeling like the motive behind a relationship could be security and I don't want that to happen either.

No that's not true either.

Participant: Okay. I want it, that's why I'm creating it.

Exactly.

Participant: But I want to get that emotion out of the equation.

It's true that you want to change that. That's very, very different than you saying I don't want it. So understand a lot of times when people say in these discussions that we have, when I say to you, "No that's not true." The true state is the emotion that's in you right at the moment. I understand you do have some desires to change it. But before you can change anything you need to admit the state you're in. And the state you're actually in is quite different. You do want to have a man in your life for security reasons because you can't create your own security - financially - you're struggling to create your own financial security. [00:21:04.09]

What you need to do instead is address the reasons why you want to have this lack of money, and have a lack of financial security. There are a lot of things in this. One of the things is if a man comes along and rescues you, isn't that going to feel wonderful? It's not going be wonderful! But it feels that way.

Participant: Yeah I know that's right. I don't want it to be a false thing, you know.

So intellectually we have a desire at this point to change the emotion, so that's really great. But we must first, before we can change the actual emotion, recognise the truth of the emotion. The truth of the emotion is I desire a lack of money. And the reason why I desire a lack of money is I want some white knight on his steed to come around. He rescues me and picks me up, chucks me on the horse and off we go into the sunset and we live happily ever after; and he's going to give me all the things that I can't create for myself.

Participant: That's it isn't it. Not what I desire, what I can't create for myself.

Exactly. So what I'm saying to you is the reason why you haven't created it for yourself is because what you truly desire is a lack of money so that you can have this other thing fulfilled, which is the man come along and do it for you. You see what I'm saying?

Participant: Yes I do.

So we need to be really honest with ourselves and examine the reason why. We also really need to be honest and examine the reasons we truly desire, and that is what I've created I did desire. So if I come to understand, I've created this lack of financial security, why would I create such a thing? I must have some very strong emotional addictions to this to create it, if it's something I'm thinking in my mind that I don't want. I must have some very, very strong emotional reasons. This is where we get down to people saying, oh you know there's the subconscious mind and the conscious mind and the subconscious mind is not the same as the conscious mind. Forget all that. All it's about is you're not recognising that you have a true desire in your soul to create a lack of money for very good, although not very beneficial, childhood emotional reasons. [00:23:33.14]

Participant: Yeah, okay. Like I said there was a belief system I knew that was stopping me from moving forward.

3.5. Steps in recognising the cause of our creations

Yep, so if we had to make some steps about what's going on in my life, why am I getting some painful events in my life, the first step is: look at what I created, look at the creation. The second step is: state the truth about it. Third point: own it - a very important point. How can I ever change if I don't own the fact of what I've created? I can't ever change, so I need to own it. Once I've owned the creation and I've stated the truth about the creation, I've owned the creation so now I'm going to emotionally own "I do not want money". My life is a shambles and a mess and it's illustrating to me how much I don't want money actually. It's telling me everything I need to know. Own that. I don't want money.

Always then ask why; be honest about the why. You'll be surprised how many times you'll be really surprised of what is the result of the why because most of the time we've avoided that most of our life. Why would I create such a thing? Instead what I do is I go in my mind and go, "No, no, no, that's not what I want; I really do want to have money in my life. What's AJ saying? He's a stupid, stupid man. You know I really do want money. Why would I not want money for?" We go down that track but in reality we're not understanding the basic principle of the Law of Desire and that is, what I desire I create.

3.6. An example of a participant who had been embezzled

Participant: Five years ago I was in New Orleans when Hurricane Katrina blew in and I was asking myself, what's my internal hurricane? I discovered it a month later - I had been embezzled. As a result of that I had to ask myself what had been my initial intention for becoming involved in this investment. I came up with – I thought it would give me freedom. The emotion that finally surfaced for me about the embezzler was that I'd been deceived. So then I asked myself, well hang on how have I deceived myself about how I get freedom? And it isn't through an embezzlement. As a result of that I had to sell my house. Can you help me with this?

I think you've answered pretty much most of your questions haven't you?

Participant: Oh okay, if that's it I'm ravelled then.

Yeah the embezzler's emotion is he wants to rip everyone off. In other words he has an issue with money, does he not?

Participant: Yeah.

If he wants to rip everyone off, wants to have a quick buck. There's you. What's your hook? Your hook into him is?

Participant: Easy money.

Yeah, notice how it's very much the same as the embezzler's motive.

Participant: Yeah.

Easy money. This is often the case, by the way. Our motive is often very much the same as the embezzler's motive, which causes the Law of Attraction. So here I am, I want easy money, so I listen to his words. There must be some other things playing too: he's a male, so how did you come to hear about all of this, was it through the net or was it personally?

Participant: Through friends.

Through friends, okay.

Participant: Who also went down the same track.

Who also lost money, okay. So what caused them to investigate it all? What was their motive? You see it was probably almost the same: some easy money and so forth. You can see how the Law of Attraction is just bringing all these people together for a big trigger about money and financial security and so forth.

Okay: that obviously comes from inside of me, an unhealed emotion that "I can't create for myself". You needed somebody else to create for you. You had your own money, didn't you? Otherwise you wouldn't have had anything to invest, would you? So you had some of your own money and you could have created something for yourself with that money, could you not? [00:28:30.00]

Participant: Yes.

But you decided that you couldn't. So what's the emotion there? "I don't know what I'm doing, I'm stupid."

Participant: Lack of faith in myself.

Lack of faith in myself.

A woman who attracts a man who rips her off has unhealed emotions within herself

You can see you list quite a few and you need to list quite a few and then what you do there is you go through that list and start working through those emotions one by one. Allow yourself to feel about all of those emotions as to why you didn't have any faith in yourself, why you didn't believe in yourself, why you felt you had to give someone else your money to create more. All of those things because basically it all came from your hook and that is you believed inside of yourself that you weren't good enough to do it for yourself. And someone came along, easy money, you give him some money, he lost it all and probably it's all somewhere in an offshore bank account.

And every one of those people who were attracted to the easy money is now out of money because every one of those persons had a true desire. So what was there true desire?

Participant: More money.

No see that's their intellectual desire, that's what they acted on, but the result is that they actually lost all their money. So what was their true desire?

Participant: To lose all their money.

To lose all their money: that's their true desire. Now why would a person want to lose all their money? There have got to be some pretty big emotional reasons to want to lose all your money, can you see that? There've got to be doesn't there? So it might be: 1) I don't feel worthy of having any money. 2) It might be that I'm quite angry about money and so therefore every time I think about money I'm upset and angry and frustrated, and that's going to reject money. 3) I might think money is evil and bad.

Participant: That's an old message from my mother.

Yeah, and so forth. I might have been manipulated by money in the past and now that I've got some, I feel manipulated by it. I feel controlled by it so I want to get rid of it all again.

Participant: Could it be also from guilt from having pinched money as a child?

Very much so.

Participant: Yeah well I'll put my hand up for that one.

How many children have pinched money as a child? Pretty much all of us have done that one. I did it once with my grandmother. I can remember I felt so guilty afterwards I had to go and own up and give it all back but what I did was I went to her purse and put all of the money in some plasticine that I had - bad idea! (laughter) - It took me ages to get it all back out again. But see this is what we do: we feel guilty, there are all sorts of emotions at play, right down to emotions regarding love, love of a parent, love of other people. [00:31:36.22]

You look at how many people in Australia are honoured if they have lots of money? It's alright to have sort of some money in Australia, isn't it? But if you've got lots of money it's a totally different thing isn't it. There are a lot of negative connotations in Australia generally, and by the way in other countries it's even worse in many cases. So there are also even cultural and environmental factors that would cause us to want to reject money.

How do all your friends act when you have plenty of money? There might be jealousy projected at you and you might be rejecting that; there might be the issue of feeling like they want to bring you down, that projection that people have at you and you feel terrible about that, so get rid of some money and that makes you feel better. There are lots of emotional reasons why you'd want to do that and the key is again to go back to what I'm creating I really desired.

It's a very powerful thing to understand - what I'm creating I really desired - because if I understand that I can look at all my creations and be really honest with myself about how they got to be; but if I neglect that, if I neglect what I create and I just say, "No, no, I didn't want to create that, don't be silly" if I say that to myself, now I'm neglecting the fact that I've got all these desires in me that created it, and you know what the rest of my life's going to be like? It's going to create all those things I think I don't want but actually I'm not being honest about. Remember it's what you want at the soul level, which is at the emotional level, not what your intellect is telling you that you want, but actually what you feel you want inside of yourself.

3.7. Being honest about our creations

Now many of you have come up to me and have said, "I want a really loving relationship." And I ask, "Are you in a loving relationship?" And you go, "No." So you don't want one. Be honest about it. Come up to me and instead and say, "I don't want a loving relationship. How do I get a desire to have a loving relationship?" That's more honest. Rather than coming up and saying to me, "Oh I want a loving relationship," but you're not in one.

Many of you come up to me and say, "I want my soulmate." Go away! No you don't! (Laughter) If your soulmate is not there right in front of you then did you want her or him? No you don't. Why wouldn't you? Because I have some very deep emotional reasons why I don't. One of them might be, "What happens if he's not what I want?" That's a big emotional reason. What happens if he comes along and he changes my life? Whoa. What happens if I actually give him my heart? No it's better to have control of your heart. Got control of your heart, you've got control of your life, you can control everything then, you don't need to give anybody your heart. Or it might be, "What happens if I'm open and vulnerable and he knows all of my secrets?" Whoa! You can see how there would be lots of emotions at play with regard to why I'm rejecting my soulmate from my life. [00:35:14.27]

So we need to be very honest and the way that we're honest is we go, alright, what I have right now is what I created. I created it because I truly desired it. The Law of Desire is always at work and I created it because I truly desired it. What distorted desire would cause this creation? What unloving desire in me would cause this creation? And then when I start digging deeply I can be honest about a lot of my desires. "Wow I don't want to be open and vulnerable to the opposite sex." Why would I want that? "I don't want to be in a loving relationship where I feel like I'm being controlled. I don't want that. I don't want to have to give up my life for some fellow, I'm sick of that. Let's be honest about the emotions that are really there because they're the emotions that I'll need to step through and release you see.

So what I desire I create. That is a very, very important principle and I can't stress that enough to you. It gives you a lot of control ironically over your life, in a soul-based joyful way, in the sense that you can look at your creation and say, "Wow I created that, isn't this wonderful?" (Laughs) "I created that, I created this lack of abundance; I'm a pretty powerful creator! I created this lack of abundance and it's because of all these emotions that I have that I created this lack of abundance. There's an emotion that if I had anything else that daddy wouldn't love me anymore," and so forth, whatever is going on.

3.8. An example of pushing away our soulmate

"I created this: "no soulmate in my life". Ah, I'm a powerful creator hey." You've got to be pretty powerful to create no soulmate in your life. Let me illustrate that for you. Remember I said to you that there are two halves of the soul and I said to you in the soulmate discussion that the most powerful force that you are ever going to experience besides love between you and God is going to be the attraction between the two halves. That's going to be far more powerful than any attraction to any child, any other relationship you have, any business partnership. This attraction is the most powerful attraction that God created.

The soulmate attraction, between two halves of the same soul, is the strongest attraction that God has created

Now if you're not with your soulmate you're a very powerful creator in the opposite direction. You're struggling with all your might to keep you apart because if you weren't struggling with all your might to keep you apart, you'd already be together, because the Law of Attraction between the soulmate halves - and I'm not joking - is the strongest possible force you can encounter. So if that's the case you can see that my desires must be very powerful to even keep the strongest possible Law of Attraction that God has created apart; that's how powerful your desires are; that's how powerful even your negative desires are, let alone your positive ones. So that's a very interesting thing to think about.

3.9. An example of creating illness in another person

Participant: I'm not sure I want to bring this up but it's sort of with me. Can you create an illness in another person?

You can create an illness in another person but not without their approval at the soul level. So let's look how it happens. So here's me, and I have a feeling towards another person, that are not very nice feelings towards this person - by the way all of you have heard of witch doctoring in Africa, and also here in Australia, you've heard of voodoo in the Americas and so forth - all of these are principles that are true and work on this same principle that I'm going to illustrate to you.

What happens is my desire then attracts spirits to me who feel much the same as me and are willing to try to act out this particular desire upon that person. If the person has some kind of emotional connection to one of those spirits who can cause an illness, the person will actually attract the spirit through that emotional connection and now that spirit can cause a physical illness in their body. [00:40:05.14]

Spirits with one person (left) can create an illness in another (right) if that person is open to an attachment that creates an illness

Participant: Yeah but that's assuming that you don't like the other person. But if that's who you're married to, and you figure and think you're happy, can it still operate?

Well it can still operate, yes, but it has to have the approval of both parties in terms of their emotional approval. Remember - what I desire I create.

So let's say my male partner is getting a sickness of some kind. Now if my partner is hooked into emotional approval from women, hooked into giving the woman everything she wants, and I have a demand upon the male that he gives me everything I want, can you see that I'm going to assist him in the creation of his own illness? You see I'm demanding something from him, which he has an illness about, he has an emotional connection with, and then therefore he starts giving to his own detriment, which causes an illness in his own body.

A woman fostering a desire in a man to do everything she wants can create an illness in the man

So yes I can assist the creation of an illness in my partner or in my child or anybody else for that matter, just by my demands upon them. Now that doesn't mean that they're not responsible because they are obviously responding to those demands, and if they loved themselves they wouldn't be doing that.

3.9.1. Controlling others through emotional hooks

Participant: But do you have to be demanding of them for them to?

Yes there has to be some emotion; remember it's not a physical or voiced demand; anything I place upon you is emotional, not physical. I can assist it with physical things; so I can speak my demands to you but I can be quite controlling of you in different ways.

For example, I could be in a relationship with you, and every time you do one particular thing that distresses me I can just cry. And if you have some kind of emotional hook into a man crying, you will definitely stop doing what you do. But you'll also feel controlled when you stop. It's really easy for me: all I need to do is cry and you're controlled; cry again, you're controlled; cry again, and you're controlled.

Now let's reverse it: it might be anger. All I need to do is feel angry, go out and kick a car; every time you notice my anger you feel very stressed out about what you did; I don't even have to aim it at you and I can control you if you have the opposite hook inside of yourself.

This is where people amaze me when they say I try to control people because if I was trying to control you the majority of you would be really, really, controlled because I know most of your emotional hooks. So if I really wanted to control you I could easily control you. But the thing is as you get more love and you can feel more emotions from people, you feel less desire to control.

So now what's happening in many relationships is one of us has an emotion and the other one has what we would call a sympathetic emotion, which enables them to be controlled by the original emotion. But when that happens, inside the person often an illness will generate if they feel like they shouldn't do that at some level. And again if they look at it, what they desired they created. They desired an illness. Why would you desire an illness? Can you do as much for another person while you have an illness? You can't, can you? You can only do a lot for another person if you're well. So if you have an illness what starts happening then? You start getting some of the control back. The other person starts noticing and saying, "Oh well you're sick, so I'll do that." [00:44:27.07]

3.9.2. An example of a participant feeling guilty for potentially creating her husband's illness

Participant: If I unconsciously wanted to be single would that have any effect? I don't have any awareness of wanting to be on my own again but ...

Why do you ask the question though? It's a strange question to ask for somebody who's never considered it.

Participant: Well I'm really wondering because ...

Because your partner is dying?

Participant: He has died. I can remember one time he commented to me about a symptom he had. My background is in nursing and we were preparing for a dinner party at the time, and I was distracted, but I never thought of it again and he never brought it up again.

What did he say? You said he said something to you.

Participant: Oh he said that he had a bit of blood in his urine, he had kidney cancer and at that time my response was, "Well I guess if it happens again you should see a doctor." The topic never came up again and I never thought of it at all until after he had died and thought, could there be a connection there? I had never thought of this before either until you're talking about it now.

Well firstly the questions that you're asking are being driven by guilt. So let's have a look at that emotion. So we want to see why you're asking the questions: firstly they're been driven by a feeling of guilt. You're afraid that you might have assisted the creation of his illness.

Participant: Well that's why I'm asking the questions because I'll dwell on it if I don't ask you.

Well I think you need to dwell on it much, much more then and feel your way through this guilt because there's obviously something under it. So what's the guilt driving it? Is it a feeling you didn't care enough for him? What's the feeling that's there that drives it?

Participant: Well I guess I'm feeling that our marriage could have been better than it was and part of that was my fault, I guess, to how I reacted.

You need to allow yourself to go into these emotions because that's what's prompting a lot of your questions. The answer to your question, not your emotions, is that actually yes, through our emotional desires we can certainly impact upon another person if they have a corresponding emotional injury that they'll respond to. And yes, that can certainly cause an illness and even their own death by responding to our desire or our demand - let's call it - because desires are never demanding. So let's call it a demand.

So if I have an emotional demand, like an emotional addiction, an emotional demand on the other person at some point, if they have an emotion where they will actually feel that demand and respond to it, then that can certainly create an illness in their own body. So in a way I have assisted in the creation of their illness. Obviously they needed to be a party to it, otherwise I couldn't. So I can't take full responsibility for the fact that they created the illness because remember what they desired they created. They created the illness for a reason and a lot of times we create illness so that we can get off the hook for something. [00:48:10.19]

3.9.3. An example of AJ creating illness in his life

I know in my life, I used to get sick on average every month for one week solid, and when I say sick I mean sick - I was like bedridden for a whole week every single month, for the majority of my life, from the age of about eighteen to thirty-three. The reason why I created that - and it's my creation - was because I would be doing so much for everybody else the rest of the time that I had not a single amount of time to even take any space for breathing for myself basically. So I needed a week off every month and I created it by getting sick.

Now the instant I realised that, I stopped doing all these other things that were creating this busy, busy, busy, busy life and ironically from that moment, I never got sick again unless I had some other issue going on but for nearly seven years I didn't get any sickness after that moment. The only time I did was when I was in denial of another emotion.

So I'd gone from eighteen to thirty-three, for fifteen years getting sick every month - just to get out of doing things for other people because that's what I was doing the rest of my life and I created it. And the instant I realised it and the instant I actually allowed myself to feel about the emotional reason for that - which was lots of things about hooking into desire for approval, desire for acceptance, desire to be doing the right thing and all these other hooks that I had into that and I started dealing with those emotionally - I never got sick for seven years. Now that's a big change, isn't it? It blew me away. If somebody had told me before that time that all of my sickness was self-created I would have laughed at them.

I'd been sick from the moment I was born basically from what I can remember. I can remember being in hospital at two years of age having a bowel operation, to have part of my bowel removed because I was so sick all the time, and then just a series of things going on all through my life where I was always sick; I always had a runny nose. The reason why I carry a hanky around now still is because what would happen was I needed this hanky and I used to carry four around with me because one was never enough in a day. My nose would be constantly streaming. Mary laughs at me sometimes because whenever she goes to cry I just hand her the hanky. (Laughs) I used to take these medications, I don't know if you've heard of them, they're old medications called Zadine or whatever it is. Those of you who've had runny noses years ago would probably relate to it and they used to dry up everything, not just your nose. (Laughs) So I'd either be popping one of these things or be out with a hanky. That was my life for most of life.

The whole lot of that stopped when I started allowing my grief to flow. It was all just about me not wanting to feel grief - the whole lot. The instant I started allowing my grief to flow I didn't have to do that anymore either. So I haven't taken any medication since then. That occurred thirteen years ago and I haven't taken any medication since that point in time.

At the time I was as sick as a dog all the time and I created it. If I had remembered this particular thing at that time I would have gone, "Wow." But that's what caused me to see, what's going on with me, why am I doing this? I always had this belief inside of me that God created a perfect system here - this body - a perfect system. So if a perfect system isn't working properly there's got to be a reason.

Why is it that your body can expel millions of germs a day and you breathe them in every moment? Right at the moment you're breathing in millions of germs. Right at the moment you're doing it and your body says alright, I don't want that one, don't want that one, don't want that one, and gets rid of them fine. So why do you catch one of them then? Well because you wanted it, that's why. There's an emotion that's saying, "I want this" somewhere and we need to look at it because what we desire we create.

3.9.4. An example of a participant feeling guilty for potentially creating her husband's illness (continued)

So yes, your husband created this as well, and yes there is a possibility that because of the projection from you he actually responded to that projection from you and that created some of his problem. But it's not the only problem because he must have wanted that emotion from his childhood. So it's an unhealed childhood emotion that would have caused all of these things. The issue for you emotionally though is that you feel a heap of guilt and you need to allow yourself to feel your way through the guilt.

Participant: Yeah because I think it was quite strange that neither of us ever mentioned that symptom that he reported again. Not even when he was actually diagnosed, which would have been two or three years after that, when it had already metastasised or whatever. But the subject never raised its head again, so to me that was what I was more wondering about - was I somehow repressing that thought?

Of course.

Participant: Because ordinarily I would have been on his tail to go off and see a doctor but I never thought of it.

But of course you would have been suppressing it.

Participant: But I never thought of it.

So there's an emotional reason why you would have suppressed it. You see a lot of times the emotional reasons are not as bad as what we think, in the sense of negative as what we think. The emotional reason might have been just a simple one of you didn't want to come face to face with the fact that this was a life threatening illness. It could just be as simple as that. Like a lot of times people who are living in a happy situation or relatively happy situation don't want to be confronted with the fact that it might change. So when a person says something that could have a lot of connotations to it, we ignore it because we don't want to change our current environment. It's like, I'll bury my head in the sand and then everything will go away. [00:54:42.10]

Participant: But I mean it was never even thought of, that was the curious thing that it never surfaced.

Yeah that's called burying your head in the sand.

Participant: Yeah. (Laughs) Okay. Well I feel better; I don't feel quite so guilty.

Well I didn't do it to make you feel less guilty. (Laughter) You need to feel your way through your guilt because there is some guilt driving you and the questions that you're asking.

4. Fear inhibits desire

Now let's get back to the desire - what I truly desire I create - now what we want to do is focus now for a moment on what inhibits desire, because if what I desire I truly create and I want to create all these lovely things, there must be some things that also inhibit my having a desire that can create those things.

4.1. Desire grows with soul growth

You know what will happen in the future, we've often talked about the spheres and soul progression, right up to what I've called the twenty-second sphere. So there's a first sphere, second sphere, third sphere, fourth sphere and so forth, right up to the twenty-second sphere. Now remember what I desire I create in a negative or positive way. So this applies whether my desires are harmonious with Divine Truth and Love or whether they're disharmonious with Divine Truth and Love. If they're disharmonious it's going to create the pain, and if my desires are harmonious it's going to create the joy.

So I know through the feedback system that if I'm in a place of pain - and this applies to all the spirit friends who are listening to us at the moment, because there are quite a few who are very interested in this discussion - if I'm creating pain and I still have some pain in my life it's because of my desires that are disharmonious with love and if I'm feeling some blissful emotions it's because of my desires that are harmonious with love.

So if you think about it, what's happening here in your soul growth, down in the 1st sphere you can say you are a midget soul. I'm not making any derogatory remarks to a person who is small, but rather just that you're a tiny soul. As you grow you're learning a lot of things and remember I said up in the twenty-second sphere your soul is like a giant merged soul. It's like a giant.

Now one of the things that is growing in this space - between these conditions - is you're receiving Divine Love, that's the way you do this, and so therefore as you're growing what happens is your soul is expanding with love. But that's not the only thing your soul's expanding in; your soul is also expanding in its expression of free will: in other words when you're in this twenty-second sphere state you're able to express your free will in a much more instantaneous manner than when you're in this 1st sphere state.

Now not only that, your soul is growing in desire. So when you begin in the first sphere, it's like "Where's my desire? I don't know; I haven't got any desires." You're in that space. Then when you get up to the 22nd sphere you know every passionate desire you have and you're fulfilling every one of them.

Soul growth from the first to the twenty-second sphere involves growth in free will expression and desire

Ironically some of you are going to have passionate desires to create a planet: not on the Earth but in a different dimension, and you'll create them, just from a desire. Some of you will actually have a desire to create a living animal that's never been created before, and you will actually create it through your desire.

4.2. Releasing fear exposes desire

We have no idea how powerful desire is on this Earth and the reason why we have no idea is because of another problem that we face here on the Earth, and that problem is this problem of fear. [00:58:37.14]

Now remember I've given a talk, where I said, "Fear is your friend" (20080823 The Human Soul \- Fear Is Your Friend). Fear is your friend because what you fear you cannot desire. So if you can list all your fears it's actually going to help you expose your desires, and once you own and acknowledge your fears you will start seeing what your true desires are. Fear is one of the most powerful influences on your desire and in particular upon you acting on your desire, even if you recognise them. And a lot of times we don't even feel we have a desire while the fear exists.

Now Mary's already told you in previous discussions that when we first met, initially for a little period of time a desire wasn't there and then when all of the feelings came in about the big picture stuff, remembering some things about our first century life, then feeling like well maybe she is Mary Magdalene and all these kind of things that came up for her emotionally, she just went straight into fear. And in that place what happened to desire? There was none. None. And I remember we went out to dinner one night when we were in our separated phase and Mary told me how little desire she had for me and I could feel that there was just all this fear speaking, just heaps and heaps of fear.

The truth is that you are not going to be able to recognise many of your own desires while you retain many of your fears. So fear is very, very important to you in this equation of desire. Because if you can release some of these fears and terrors you have, you will finish up exposing your desires. Then you'll also need to release the fears about acting on your desires, and then you'll realise the power of creation because that's how creation is made, by actually creating from your desires.

4.2.1. An example of a participant who is afraid she is like her parents

Participant: AJ I was just going back to the creating money in your life and I was just wondering about my own fears of money being evil. It took me back to I fear really being like my parents. They fought all the time about money and if I fear to be like my parents then I can't desire. That is why I can't desire money.

So let's put up our hands, how many of you don't want to be like your parents? Ah, that's almost everyone actually. I should ask how many of you do want to be like your parents? (AJ's son Tristan puts up his hand) (Laughter and Applause). There's a couple. Why is everybody laughing?!

You see what's happening a lot is that these are very big emotional injuries that we face; the big emotional injuries are related to our parents; so a lot of times if my parent had a certain mannerism or a certain characteristic that I hate and judge and therefore I won't want it in myself and but if it is in me anyway I'll squash it to pieces rather than recognise that it's present. The problem is most of the time it is present because I was influenced emotionally by them in my development. So a lot of times it is actually present in some way. This is the problem we face: we're so judgemental of the people who brought us in to the world that in the end we finish up judging every unhealed emotion that's related to them and we suppress that but that eventually controls the rest of our life. [01:03:03.06]

Participant: So AJ is that meaning that to create desire in my life for this instance, it is to process that emotion that is making me afraid?

Exactly.

Participant: Because that's very big because there are a lot of things involved with my parents.

Of course.

Participant: So that means I'm not going to have money for a long, long time.

No for two hundred years you're never going to have money, trust me. (Laughter) What do you want me to say? (Laughs) No what it means is that you'll find that you'll release one emotion and then there'll be a bit of improvement; you'll release another emotion there'll be some more improvement; release another emotion there'll be more improvement and so forth. That's how it happens obviously and the more you're willing to connect to and release, the more improvement there'll be and the more rapid it will be; so it depends on your desire as to whether it takes you two hundred years - and by then you won't want money anyway because you'll be up there - or whether it's going to take you ten months or one month, it really just does depend upon your desire. So the key is to focus on that and allow yourself to see the results. [01:04:14.04]

4.3. The benefits of releasing fears and other erroneous emotions

This is where I see many of us are feeling quite negative about our emotional processing work but our emotional processing work is very exciting; it's so exciting because what we're doing is we're releasing these things we're afraid of, which now allow us to have a desire and now our creation is going to be totally different - so it's very exciting. Every emotion you release, I feel like wow they're going to really notice that.

4.3.1. An example of meeting our soulmate

We were talking the other day about somebody, I can't remember who it was, and we're saying, "Yeah they're going to meet their soulmate in the next week or so." And the next discussion that we had with them they told us they knew who their soulmate was." Oh that was you Neena, wasn't it? So what happened was like we could feel in Neena the emotions that were being released regarding this blockage towards her soulmate. We could feel them slowly dropping off and a different one dropping off, a different one dropping off and eventually Mary and I said - and it was a few weeks before Nina come to talk to us - "Oh she'll meet her soulmate pretty shortly." And lo and behold...

Participant: I haven't met him.

You haven't met him but you know exactly who it is. But you did meet him didn't you, years ago?

Participant: Oh yes, years ago.

So you know who it is but the issue is that we could feel that because of the emotions that have dropped off - now that's exciting, isn't it? You see most of us are looking at our emotions and going, "Oh that's a terrible emotion, another one to deal with, oh aren't I stupid, aren't I useless, aren't I worthless ..." And in reality what we can be saying to ourself is, "Wow this is such an exciting journey because I now have the power to control my creations and I know how to do that. Before I didn't know how to do that and now I know how to do that." That's amazing isn't it!

How many times in the past have you been totally frustrated, that you get this, you try as hard as you can and it doesn't work out? How many times have you been frustrated or disappointed about something not working for you? Goodness me it's like my whole life was littered with that; but as soon as you start focusing on the fact that you know what to do, and that is you know that you need to have a desire to create - that desire causes all my creation - and I know that my fear is the thing that prevents my desire, and I know that if I focus on my fear - fear's my friend - it can tell me exactly what's blocking me up. [01:06:41.13]

Some of you have looked at your soulmate many times and you've never even seen them, you've never even recognised them. You don't even know that they are who they are yet and that's because of your fears, your fears that need to be released. And one day you'll be walking along, and you'll have released quite a lot of fears about the opposite gender and about control and manipulation by the opposite gender, all these other things about childhood and sexual stuff and whatever and you've been working your way through these things and you'll just look at this person and you'll go, "Hmm, that's my soulmate. Wow." That's an amazing time to actually come to that place.

4.3.2. An example of money issues

Then there are also other things where you're walking along in your life and you realise, "Wow, I haven't thought about money now for months. I haven't even thought about it. I don't even think about it when I go shopping anymore." You know what it's like, I've been shopping with people like this, I'm riding my trolley around, and I can feel they want that particular thing - that one there on the aisle there - but they're not putting it in the trolley and I'm going, "What's going on here with this person?" I can feel in them this thing of, "Oh it's too much, I shouldn't do that, maybe AJ won't like it in his trolley"; all these hundreds of different things going on inside of them emotionally that cause them to do that.

When Mary and I went shopping initially, which was I think for the first time we were in the UK, it was quite funny really. I could feel a lot of these desires Mary had to put this particular chocolate in, but no, no I don't know if I can do that, and all of those kinds of things happening. It's because of our fears that these things happen. The more I release, I can go along and just bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, picking items off the shelf and putting them my trolley. Alright, next aisle, and so forth and that's what shopping is.

How many of you have a joyful food shopping experience? It's like, "Oh do I get that? Or do I get that? Oh that one's three cents more than that one but I like that one, but that one's three cents more. No it feels too guilty; I'll put that one back and put this one in the trolley." That's what we do; because of we don't let ourselves have our desires because of fears that we have.

If I said to you tomorrow get all the money you have in your bank, whatever that be - whether it's ten cents, fifty cents, one dollar, or one hundred or one thousand dollars - get all your money out of the bank, put it in your pocket, and then sit down and write a list of what you would like to do with it. Then go and do it. Now trust me that's going to bring up lots of fears. "But where's my next dollar going to come from?" is one of the first fears isn't it? That's what happens. You see what the problem is, is that every time we are so focused on fear we shut down our desires.

Now what I try to do instead of doing that is I allow myself to have my desire and when I have no money I then have a big bawl about why I have no money and why I created that. I let myself feel the emotion that created that - and as long as my desires are harmonious with love and truth, we're going to be fine. That's what's going to happen; everything will be fine as long as my desires are harmonious with love and truth. If they aren't, I'll feel the pain of it and then I'll be able to identify the emotion and that will be good too, because this emotion is preventing me from being at-one with God in the end. So I need to deal with this emotion anyway, otherwise I'm not ever going to be at-one with God, which is what I really, really, really desire. "Oh, but AJ said what I desire I create, so if I really desired being at-one with God, then I'd already be at-one with God." And that's true too. So can you see I must have a whole list of reasons why I don't really desire to be at-one with God that also I would need to allow myself to feel about and be honest about? [01:11:06.17]

4.4. Recognising our fears

Participant: If you've lived all your life with these fears, how do you recognise them?

Oh in other words all these fears are now real to you ...

Participant: Yeah well forty-five years, and that's your life basically isn't it.

Yep.

Participant: So I don't even know what my fears are, let alone my desires sometimes.

With fear please don't tell yourself that you don't know what they are, because that's a lie. You know exactly what they are but you don't want to know. You see the problem with our fears is we don't want to know what they are: that's why you're not able to list them.

So when I started this process if somebody had said list your fears, I would have written down two or three things. I've asked many of you to write down your fears and I went up to one lady in one of the workshops we had when we were up at Maleny and she had four things written and I'm feeling her fears and feeling like she could have written thirty pages and still not ended it. The reason why is because most of us don't even want to have an intellectual awareness of what our fears really are.

Now with anything that happens like that, the first thing we need to do is pray, so the first thing we need to do is pray, "Please God give me the ability to see my fears because I want to start seeing my fears, not just ignoring them anymore and denying them anymore and making out they're not there anymore and all those things. What I want to do instead is see them for what they are." As soon as you start having a true desire towards God to create a list of your fears, guess what you'll have? A list of your fears; until that point you won't have a list of your fears.

So someone else can come up and tell you, "Oh I think you're afraid of this, I think you're afraid of that, I think you're afraid of this and I think you're afraid of that," and some of that might resonate, some of it might not but at the end of the day unless you really want to know what you're afraid of, you won't want to do anything about it anyway.

So my suggestion is if you have no idea what you're afraid of, start asking God to tell you what you're afraid of, and develop a desire to know what you're afraid of because remember - what I desire I create. If I don't know what I'm afraid of, that's because I don't want to know what I'm afraid of. The same principle applies - what I desire I create. So if what I created is "that I have no idea what fears I have", I want to have no idea of what fears I have. And that's the thing I need to change if I want to grow.

4.4.1. Being honest about not wanting to progress towards God

This is the beauty of being honest with yourself - often we tell ourselves all these hidden messages that are totally untrue. We say, "I do want progress towards God", but no progress is happening. So I look at that and I say, "No progress is happening," I need to be honest with myself.

I've had periods of time in my own progression where no progress happened. None, for months, like for three or four months, nothing. What did I want? I desired no progress because that's what I created. Why would I desire no progress? Because I'm afraid of something. Do I desire to even know what I'm afraid of? No, because I don't want to know what I'm afraid of. It must be pretty big; so I'm probably terrified rather than afraid, so then I have to go into my terror. I need to go into my terror, what am I terrified of? I'm terrified that I might die, or I'm terrified that this might happen wrong or I'm terrified that I might be gaoled or I'm terrified I'll lose my girl ... whatever I'm terrified about and then I start getting honest with myself about my feelings, and now I can see my blocks to desire and now I can start progressing again.

You see what we get is what we wanted, in our heart - not intellectually. So we need to be honest about that truth. If we're honest enough about that truth, we can then take the next step which is; why would I want it? What am I afraid of? What is my real emotion? Because it's my emotion that creates everything. [01:15:56.22]

People come up to me and say, "I've got no idea how to progress." The answer to that statement is you don't want to have any idea how to progress. Right at that moment you don't want to, emotionally; you don't want to have any idea how to progress. Now why would you want to create that? There must be some very good emotional reasons. Go for them, find them, let yourself experience them and release them.

4.4.2. Praying to God to see truth

So my feeling is that if you allow yourself to pray to God about wanting or having a desire to know your fears, usually within a few days you'll know quite a few of them because God definitely answers pure desire prayers. You'll find them through your Law of Attraction, you'll be driving along, you get cut off on the road, you pull off to the side - "Oh I'm afraid of an accident." That kind of thing will happen through your Law of Attraction. You'll see what you're afraid of. "I'm afraid of dying, I'm afraid of being injured", and away you can go with your fears. Then with your emotional fears you'll start noticing things happen, like maybe a little fissure in a relationship with a person or a fissure in a relationship with a friend and you'll start going, "I'm afraid of losing this friend, I can see that now, I never saw that before, I can see that now." Pray to God about seeing it and you'll soon see it happen.

You see a lot of people have suppressed their desires so much that they have no desire to feel their own truth. What I desire I create. So that being the case I would actually be saying to myself, if what I desire I create and I don't have any feelings of any emotional injury in me, that's because I don't want to know, and look - lo and behold. And if I say I've got no emotional injuries and I'm not yet at-one with God and I'm not in a state of pure bliss and love all of my life, and I'm saying to you I've got no emotional injuries, am I speaking a truth? No, but I am speaking my own truth in that I think I've got no emotional injuries and what I desired I created. I created this belief inside of me that I've got nothing to work on. Why would I want to create that belief?

Can you see there are a lot of emotional reasons why I'd want to create that one? You imagine if I start seeing myself as I truly am, how's that going to feel? I'd rather not do that, what I'd rather do is make this big fictitious image of myself that I can look at and admire, and say, "Yeah he's a nice fellow," so that I don't have to see myself as I truly am. We do this all the time because we don't want to see what's inside of us. God wants us to see what's inside of us if we want to become at-one with God because you will be at-one with God, so therefore you will see yourself as you truly are at that point. So this is part of this growth, is seeing yourself as you truly are, "warts and all" as the saying goes.

5. Audience questions

5.1. Pure desires do not require others to be involved

5.1.1. An example of a couple with different desires

Participant: What do you do if you have opposing desires in a relationship?

So we've got one person in the relationship, Alex, and there's the lady in your relationship and let's say you have a desire to go out tonight to party, so that's your desire, her desire is to stay home.

Participant: It was actually the opposite a few weeks back.

Oh okay. (Laughter) Sorry.

Participant: Which was spirit influence by the way.

That's okay. So your desire was to stay home.

Participant: Be a good boy and process. (Laughter)

Yeah sometimes I get it mixed up. What happens is I can feel what it's about a lot of times but a lot of times if I say exactly, people don't connect as much. What I'm trying to do is help you see the other person's perspective all the time as well.

So one person desired to stay home, and the other person desired to party. Okay. Everything's fine up until this point, this person who wants to stay home, and is perfectly able to stay home whereas the person who desires to party, is perfectly happy to go party. So what's the problem now? So now say what the problem really is. [01:20:58.20]

Participant: I had no problem with that.

Why would you ask the question?

Participant: It's when it pertains to material things or where we're going to live.

Okay, but it's the same question isn't it? When does the problem begin? At the moment there's no problem; both people have their own desire and they're allowed to act upon their own desire, are they not? If they have free will and honour each other's free will and honour each other's desire, they're able to act upon their desires are they not? Yes, so we have no problem at this point, do we?

But what we also have when we have desires is these things called unhealed expectations. This person who desires to stay home wants the other person to stay home with them, and this person who wants to go and party wants the other person to go party with them. Now our desires are disharmonious with love. My desires don't involve you.

Having opposing desires is in harmony with love provided there is no expectation for the other person to share the desire

Very few of you got that, so I'm going to say it again. My desires don't involve you or any other person in this universe, if they are pure. It is when they're impure and they're tainted; now they probably will start to involve other people.

So for example, my desiring my soulmate in my life and my desiring to love my soulmate are two different things. One of them places an expectation on my soulmate to be in my life while the other one just gives her the gift of love, whether she's in my life or not. You see when we exercise desire disharmonious with love, or disharmonious with free will, then we are not exercising a pure desire anymore and that's the principle we need to remember.

The same principle applies to the Law of Free Will too. If I exercise my free will in a manner that harms your free will, then I am no longer exercising my free will in a loving manner anymore. In this case, with your desire to stay home, and someone else's desire to party, each person is allowed to have their desire but as soon as I project my expectation on the other person, I am now no longer owning my own desire fully; I am now in another addiction emotionally. I want someone else to experience my desire with me, and that is not loving.

So I desire to share the truth to the world, none of you have to respond to that. That's my desire. Now if my desire and your desires at some point in the future match, then both of us will finish up sharing, or three of us or five of us or ten of us or hundreds of us or a thousand of us will finish up sharing the truth with the world because our desires match each other. Our desires that match are a part of our Law of Attraction. So as our desires start matching, we start attracting lots of other people who seem to have similar desires. One of the desires that has brought you and I together is a desire for truth. I have the same desire and so you have that desire, and so we're attracted to each other. That's how the Law of Attraction works. So at some point you must have a pure desire for truth, because what you desired you created.

5.2. Pure desires can manifest rapidly

Can you see how a lot of our desires are really beautiful aren't they? And see how rapidly you created some of your desires. Like many of you have started exercising this principle of desire in your day-to-day life and many of you have started to experience how you have a desire and within a few moments a lot of times it's created. That's how powerful your soul is. When you get to the twenty-second sphere of your development, you'll instantly create all of your desires that are harmonious with love.

By the way it's a terribly frustrating thing to have to come back down to Earth and have that not happen. So that's one of my emotions that I've had to heal, is that I exercise a desire and it doesn't happen for weeks or sometimes months or whatever. That's something that I've had to actually heal within myself because I'm so used to having desires that are harmonious with love and truth instantly met. [01:26:20.07]

But as you grow and as you get more and more Divine Love flowing through your soul again, you'll find that you will get to that place of instantly creating you desires. It'll get to the point even where you instantly want to go from here to say the USA, and you'll go and you won't need a plane to do it; you won't need anything else to do it other than just you. Passports are going to be a bit difficult then aren't they! Like where's the border control? So you can see that if people knew these truths, the world would change quite rapidly too as a result of exercising desire.

5.3. Beliefs about desire on Earth

One of the most difficult things to teach a new spirit who passes into the spirit world is desire because desire is suppressed so much on this planet that almost everybody who passes has no idea how to exercise their desire. Many of you have seen the movie "Ghost"? You remember there was this nasty spirit going along kicking a can or something and it was flying around and the other guy, Patrick Swayze I think it was, he tried kicking the can and he couldn't? That's all part of this desire thing. You see most spirits when they first pass don't even know how to kick a can in terms of having a pure desire to do it. So how are they going to exercise a pure desire to change their soul if they can't even do that?

And this is part of our problem here on the planet is we are so detuned from desire. Desire in fact is condemned. It's condemned by religion, it's condemned by the government, it's condemned by all the systems that you see - the monetary system and everything - it all condemns desire. It's very rare for us to talk about desire in a very open manner and actually exposing our desires, whether they are harmonious with love or even not. It's very rare to discuss the issue because every desire is often thought to be bad. What's the whole Buddhist type new age philosophy? Detuning from your desire is the only way to be happy and I'm saying totally the opposite of that; I'm saying if you don't recognise desire inside of you, you will never experience joy and bliss but the desire has to be harmonious with love and truth. So that's the principle we need to keep remembering.

5.4. Naturally acting upon desires

Participant: I'm a bit muddled up between self-reliance and God-reliance. If I sit in my desire do I then go out and build it to create it?

Of course.

Participant: Or do I sit in my desire and wait for God to bring it to me?

If you sit in your desire and wait for God to bring it to you, then you don't have a desire. Like if I say, "I want a cup of tea," and then I sit down on a chair and wait ... (Laughter)

Participant: Yeah but hang on a minute ...

God's not bringing me one at the moment obviously.

Participant: Yeah but I've watched Graham, Graham creates a desire and I watch it happen, it walks in the door.

Of course.

Participant: It's given to him.

Of course.

Participant: Okay, so there goes my question. Do you sit in your desire and then go out and work it and create it? Like if you want a bank balance you go to work and earn it.

No you're missing the point of my illustration.

Participant: Obviously.

What's the point of my illustration? If you really had a desire you would not only have it drawn to you, but you would also feel like you want to create it and you would do something to create it. It's a mixture of both, Jenn. You can't just sit and have a desire and expect everyone around you to create it. [01:30:46.13]

Participant: So like I said I'm muddled between self-reliance and God-reliance. So could you talk about how desire has to do with that? I just don't get it obviously.

Mary, you wanted to say? Mary's going to join me now because she feels so passionate about this subject.

Mary: I was just going to mention there's a lovely passage in "Through the Mists". I don't know - have you read, "Through the Mists", Jenn? No. There's a part where the spirit Aphraar has just passed and he goes to a sleeping place and then a lot of souls who have passed who have physical deformities come in and a whole group of people gather together to help heal these people. What happens is they're led by this very powerful spirit in a beautiful song that creates colour and all of their emotion, and in doing that the spirit leading asks for God's help in that. What they're demonstrating is their heartfelt loving desire to heal the people and they are giving in that sense and because they have faith in God, God assists in that very pure loving desire. Can you see how that relates to your own life?

Participant: So you sit in the desire and the space of love ...

Mary: Yeah you don't have to sit though. You just hold that desire within you, and that might influence your actions, and very often does. Like if I had a desire for AJ and I just sat at home, I wouldn't really be experiencing my desire would I? I would want to be near him, going to see him, talking to him in whatever way I could. And if it was coming from a loving place I wouldn't be damaging his free will in doing it but I would be acting, because the desire was very heartfelt and within me, I would naturally begin to act.

5.5. Desire is a prayer to God

Participant: So into the mix you would then start to pray to God to make the actions that you're taking ...

This is something to understand, Jenn - the desire is a prayer to God, the desire is the prayer; this is why desire is so important. You see we think, "Oh I have a desire so I've got to pray about it." No - you're already praying about it. The moment you actually have a pure desire, or even an impure on, you are already praying about it. The impure one is not going to be answered of course in the sense that God's not going to assist you in it but the pure one is definitely going to be answered every single time because God's going to assist you every single time. [01:33:53.13]

Participant: So as soon as you move into desire, God's there, with you.

Spot on.

Mary: If you have a relationship with God. That's why at the chorale in "Through the Mists" they were acting in their pure desire and it was their faith in God that helped God act. So that's why developing your relationship with God is so essential. Working through the emotions that block your relationship with God impacts upon every area of your life.

But that being said, even if you don't want a relationship with God, every spirit in the sixth sphere has learnt this Law of Desire; so they've learnt the Law of Desire but they've learnt it without God. In other words they have their desires but because God isn't involved in any of their desires at the heart level, they're actually limited to the sixth sphere in their development. But when you exercise your desire that is when God feels it - God feels it straight away - and if it's harmonious with love and truth, God will act upon it straight away no matter whether you're on the Natural Love Path or on the Divine Love Path.

The thing that I just said is something to really understand, and that is that every time you have a desire that's harmonious with love and truth, you are already in prayer. You are already in prayer and that's why it is so powerful. Because you are already in prayer and you're already being assisted.

Participant: Thank you for your patience.

And yours for having your hand up for some time. (Laughs)

5.6. An example of a participant desiring to make women feel wanted

Participant: Well I just went and did a bit of processing in the room downstairs and I think that maybe I had a breakthrough but I wanted to confirm that because it feels a little strange. It's about the woman I was here with a few weeks ago. She and I split up. We're still communicating through email and phone calls and I've been getting a lot of really needy emails from her, which I love of course because it makes me feel good if she needs me. So I've been trying to deal with that and realising why do I still want this and why am I still attracting this into my life? I had to deal with a lot of that, but I came to the conclusion that "I don't want you," and I had to repeat that a few times - "I don't want you. It's not that I don't love you, but I don't want you." That feels so wrong to say that but at the same time it was so liberating. I realised in so many relationships in the past I felt this need to make the woman feel wanted regardless of how I felt about it. So is that okay? (Laughter)

What you're asking me is "it's okay to not have a desire"? Isn't that what you're asking? You're saying is it okay for me to not want to have a desire for her? The answer is yes of course that is okay. But it's not okay to not love her in the sense that if we're talking about what is harmonious with truth and love, it wouldn't be okay to not love her but it is okay to not want her in your life, it's okay to not want her at all, it's okay for you to not be in a relationship with her and it's okay for you to decide that you don't want that particular person in your life. Why is that not okay? [01:37:55.10]

Of course we need to look at some emotions behind it as to what's driving it, and there could be some emotions of feeling controlled by her, feeling manipulated by her and so forth, which we would need to allow ourselves to feel but we are allowed to not want to do something. Totally. And while it might sound terrible to the rest of the audience, you are perfectly able to not want somebody because I don't want you guys, I'm sorry but I don't. This person here – Mary - now that's a different matter - she's my girl and I do want to have her in my life. That doesn't mean I feel like she has to be in my life, and Mary knows very well that she can leave my life at any time she desires, but I do desire her in my life. I desire to express my love to her, which means that for her to feel she'd need to be in my life. But I don't want you. So you're allowed to not want me too and that's fine isn't it? What's wrong with that?

Participant: Would you recommend that this is something I should communicate to her?

Of course.

Participant: But that will hurt.

Why?

Participant: I mean it will hurt her.

Why?

Participant: Because she wants to be wanted.

Ah, yes she has an unloving expectation of you, and she's only hurt by her own unloving expectation. You see what she's placing on you is she's saying, "Want me." Really it's that love me thing (AJ sings) - "Love me, love me say that you love me." A lot of people have that going on but that is a projection of an expectation on to another person, which is actually unloving. So of course when you say to her, "I don't want you," she is going to feel hurt but she is only going to feel hurt because her desire is disharmonious with love.

It is not harmonious with love for a woman to place a demand upon a man for him to want her

Is your desire disharmonious with love? No. You're allowed to not want somebody. So that's not disharmonious with love but her desire to want to be wanted by you is certainly disharmonious with love. That's the irony you see: the irony is that oftentimes we think quite the opposite. We're saying to ourselves, "Oh if I say that to her I'll hurt her." No, no, no, at the moment she's hurting you by projecting at you an unloving projection, which is not harmonious with love or truth. Up until now you've gone along with it to your own pain, your own detriment.

As soon as you acknowledge the truth to yourself, "I don't want this lady, I don't want her," now you can disconnect from that pain because now you're in a state of truth realising, "I don't want her, wow, this is so liberating, I don't have to want somebody." And when you tell her it's going to liberate her too, perhaps. She has the choice of course - she can choose to go down the track of blaming you and getting angry with you and getting upset with you and doing all the other things, which is all denial of her own emotion - or she can go down the track of saying; "Yeah I'm in pain because I have an unloving projection at this man." [01:41:42.09]

So what you're doing by saying firstly to yourself, "I don't want her" is perfectly harmonious with love both of yourself and her. Because up until now what's happened? You've not said it, but you've lived in this sort of semi relationship thing going on, having to give all these things you don't want to go give. Is that truth? Is that loving? It's not. So now that you've recognised that I don't want her, the best thing to say to her is, "I don't want you. The truth is I don't want you. It feels so good for me to say I don't want you. I love you, I care about you and I care about everything but I don't want you. I don't want you in a relationship, maybe down the track as a friend, maybe, but I don't want this relationship," for whatever the reason is. And stating the truth of that is not an unloving act. Sorry, yes there's two negatives there - that is a loving act, I should say, so it is a loving act to say that. What hasn't been a loving act is for her to have the expectation that you want her. That's a very unloving act and it's placed all sorts of demands on you. You have felt controlled and manipulated by those demands and hence you've felt quite a lot of personal pain. Is that not true? Yeah.

Can you see often - sometimes - we get so mixed up on what society accepts and what everyone else around us will accept and all that stuff and before we know it what's going on? What's going on most of the time is we're so far away from love that we don't even know what love is anymore. Love does not sacrifice yourself for the other person, never ever sacrifices yourself for the other person: it's such a hard thing to learn. We've been brought up from day dot, ever since we entered this planet, with this belief that you're there to love somebody else; you've got a job before you began; most of us have had this job before we began and that is we have to do things a certain way so that other people can be loved. Many of us have grown up in families where the parents have this emotional investment in us loving them. You try it, just say to them, "I don't love you anymore" and see how they react. Or, "I don't love how you treat me", and see how they react to that. A lot of times you'll see what the emotional investment is.

5.7. An example of a couple with different desires (continued)

Participant: Sorry this question sort of has been hanging because other people went before me but I'm still caught up with the couple here. I wonder if in fact if they keep on following their own desires and one goes out and one stays home, and yet we're not meant to compromise either, how are they going to not finish up in a divorce? In Australian statistics just recently, Queensland leads and there were ten thousand divorces in Queensland last year and I don't want these two divorcing.

(Laughs) Well it's pretty hard considering they're not even married (laughter) and that means nothing from God's Perspective for a start. Love is the binding factor anyway so straight away as soon as you're in love with somebody there is a relationship established and from God's Perspective there is a soul transaction going on, that's what's happening.

Mary: I was just wondering about the emotion that drove the question.

Yeah, we'll talk about that too. You're worried about people divorcing and you're worried about how much compromise has to happen to keep them together - well really what you believe is that you should compromise to stay together. And I'm saying to you if you've got to compromise to stay together, why are you together? You're only together because you're holding on to this principle of a marriage. Why stay in a marriage if both of you are not having your desires met? What's the point in staying in a marriage? What you want is this person needs to have their desire, this person needs to have those desires and if the desires match they'll spend time together and if the desires don't match they'll go their separate ways. [01:46:15.06]

Mary: Think about the difference in the quality of the bond. If AJ and I are living together and every day I squash a desire just to make him happy, and every other day he squashes a desire just to make me happy, and we do that for twenty or thirty or forty or fifty years, at the end of that we'll be sitting there in front of the television resenting each other because we're not expressing who we truly are. Now compare that to the bond that we would have which is what is capable in a soulmate relationship because your personalities are the same - we're the same soul.

Yeah.

Mary: As we work through our emotional injuries our desires become closer and closer together so there's a huge synergy between us and it's focused on love and desire. We're not going to be sitting in front of the television at seventy years old; we're going to be off climbing a mountain and creating the universe or something. What would you prefer?

I'm not going to be, I'm going to be on the bed making love. (Laughter)

Mary: That's after lunch! (Laughter)

Oh okay! That's after we do the other things is it?

Mary: And in the meantime when I have a desire or one of us has a desire that's not matching the other, if we each follow our own desires but we're humble and on the Divine Love Path, our error is going to be exposed. But if we squash it, how are we going to find our error? How are we going to confront that emotion?

Yeah don't stay in a relationship just because it's a relationship, just because you've got a piece of paper saying you're married and just because you've been married for twenty-five years or one year or one month. Stay in a relationship because you both desire each other and you desire to grow together and you desire all these different things.

5.7.1. Meeting our soulmate by following desires

For the soul halves, as Mary's pointed out, it's very important to understand that the soul halves mean that once you meet your soulmate ... and by the way one of the ways you'll meet your soulmate is by following your own desire. That's one of the only ways you can meet your soulmate actually. [01:48:32.23]

Soulmates get drawn together by common desires

If I'd never followed my own desire I would never have met Mary, ever. It was through a whole series of events of following my desire that brought me closer and closer and closer to Mary. I would never have met her if I hadn't followed my desire.

Now the beauty of one half of the soul following its desire - and if it's desire is harmonious with truth and love, and as long as it follows it in harmony with truth and love - the other half of the soul will be drawn to it. And if the other half of the soul follows its desire, these two in the end will merge because of their combined desire, which is in the same direction. So it's very important to understand that even with regard to the soulmate relationship the way it gets merged together is through your desire: that's how it happens, it's such a powerful thing to understand that that's how it happens.

Alright so we're going to have to finish. (Applause)
