Hi, I’m the Space Quest Historian.
I’ve been keeping busy these past couple
of weeks playing through the Space Quest games
with the SQH Discord, ostensibly to capture
footage for a future series I’m doing — but
of course we couldn’t resist messing around
a bit.
For instance, a couple of weeks ago we were
playing Space Quest I and II, but after we
were done with that, we decided to mess around
a bit with Space Quest III, just for shits
and giggles.
So we got out the original floppy version
— not the Collection version, ‘cos you
can’t do this with that version — the
original floppy version with the original
setup program, and put the game into 4 color
CGA mode.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t recording at the
time, so I can’t show you the priceless
first reaction that some of the Discord denizens
had at seeing the game in this godawful hideous
mode, but here’s a somewhat accurate recreation:
So, after we sort of got over the shock, we
started messing around with the debug mode,
‘cos my mate PickledDog said, “If you
think this is bad, you have to see Phleebhut.”
But I didn’t have savegames for this version
yet, and I wasn’t about to go through the
whole garbage freighter bit in 4 colors, so
we were like, fuck it, let’s just pump that
shark and teleport there.
But we didn’t know what room numbers were
for Phleebhut, so we had to guess.
And of course we got it wrong, so we ended
up in Monolith Burger instead — more specifically,
at the clerk close-up.
And ... whoa, dude.
You feelin’ alright?
Oh, good god, your ... pupils had just sort
of ... detached from your face.
But they seem to be back.
That’s — very reassuring, I guess.
So, having seen that Eldritch horror show
unfold before us, of course we wanted to peace
out as fast as humanly possible.
So we hit up another teleport code, but this
one didn’t so much take us away as it just
added to the nightmare fuel.
Suddenly, The Two Guys themselves appeared
on the screen, floating beside the clerk,
chatting away to no one in particular.
In fact, this conversation they’re having
is the conversation that happens at the end
of the game, after you escape ScumSoft and
put the Aluminum Mallard into attack speed,
just before Elmo sends his Skull Fighters
at you — and yes, I realize what I said
right there was complete gibberish to anyone
who hasn’t finished Space Quest III, but
let’s face it, why are you watching a video
about this if you haven’t finished Space
Quest III.
Anyway, this conversation is on a timer.
In the actual game, when you’re watching
this conversation happen, you’re not supposed
to pay attention to it — you’re supposed
to immediately go into the nav screen, raise
the shields, and fight off the Skull Fighters.
‘Cos if you don’t, well, game over.
But in this horrifying 4 color instance, we
could sit back and watch the entire conversation
unfold.
And, right at the end, just before it looped,
this happened:
Did you see that?
Mark Crowe turned his head and looked at the
player.
So, you may be thinking, big fucking deal.
Scott Murphy does the same earlier in the
conversation.
Yes, but the thing is: No one has ever seen
this.
The Cutting Room Floor website states that
this animation of Mark turning his head is
unused, that it doesn’t happen in the game.
And, well, they’re technically right — if
you’re playing the game normally and watching
the conversation, the timer runs out before
it gets to Mark’s line, so you’re dead
in space before it happens.
But until now, everyone just thought that
Mark turning his head to address the player
was something that was drawn up but never
used.
This line of Mark’s, about how Roger has
been in deep space for too long, was actually
in the game all along.
They just fucked up the timer.
So, if we just set the game to run in 16 colors,
for the sake of everyone’s sanity ... there
we go ... we can use the pump shark teleporter
to simulate what this would have looked like
in the actual game.
Okay, that shell-shocking discovery aside
... has anyone ever sat back and actually
watched the Skull Fighters come at you through
the windshield?
It’s just a nice piece of animation that
I’m sure 99% of all players missed ‘cos
they were busy trying to crash-learn the weapons
systems.
So, anyway, Mark Crowe actually does turn
his head.
It’s not a completely unused animation.
The timer is just off.
And, oh, Phleebhut in 4 colors?
Yeah, It’s horrifying.
Look at this shit.
You can’t even see where the dunes begin
and end.
This is death by dithering.
Yeah, you’re welcome.
Thank you so much for watching - until next
time, I’ll see you around the chronostream.
Bye.
