Hello, everybody! My name is Markiplier and welcome back to "Sort the Court."
Now this has been updated, ~INCREDIBLY~
because the previous version that I played
was only a Game Jam demo. This a full released version of the game
with MORE interactions, MORE arrivals of people that want to join or destroy
your village, and, possibly an ending. I have no idea
I killed the dragon last time! But I'm going to play it.
I'm going to try to only showcase the new stuff in it.
So we'll see what happe- *BURPS* oh my god! Blegh!
Apologies. I don't know why I get so burpy.
I understand, goodbye! Farewell!
Wait did you say something about a council? Counci- OoOooOOooOh, not you.
It usually works out well for me so I'm going to do that
Well, eat ten dicks and call me Sally!  This is not going to go well.
We're off to a BAD start...
Alrighty then.Well, let's try this again shall we?
HellooOOOO!!
YAAASSS let's do it!
Well suck my ten thousand dicks, eat a fuckin'...piece of garbage you...  Cock!
Ok so this isn't going very well to begin with but that's okay.
"My boat's too-" Gah.. *disappointment* yeah.. you can..
I know, I know you're good for it I know you are
I know you're gonna be good I thought you'd come later in the game but good god.
Ugh, yeah sure you can build more houses .
Oh god dammit.
I'm out of money on day ONE!?
And PEOPLE are sssssssaad.
What happened to me?
Man I just got done playing Reigns, the same thing!
Alright eat 'em.
I need mo-
I need money. Thank you that's a lot of gold.
Im a bad king.  Alright you better not dick me over this time you son of a shit!
Yes! Finally!
Alright good, it's about damn time
Should I go for double or nothing? Hell yeah I will, I like to--Fuuuuuuuu...
Euugh death and misery for everybody.
We-he-hellllll. We-he-he-he-helll. Ha-ha-HA
Im gonna get a game - oh fuck you in your curly butt.
Sa- people's souls for my gol- yeah sure gimme the gold.
If I'm gonna go down in a sinking ship  we're gonna sink hard  into the very bottom of the ocean.
Well...p-poopy butts.
Grandma? "Can I borrow some coi-" You know what what Grandma?
Apparently this is the video playthrough where I'm- I'm a dick so...
..fuck you grandma..
ooh ch- ooh my oooOOh no Ooooh noOHOHO
Oh, how could I do that to Grandma?
I'm such a dick!
Are you- if if you- i swear..
OH COME ON!
UUGH
Well.. shit
Alright no more gambling, no gambling, no gambling
I don't recall you but maybe you came around. "Plants are interesting".. sure
Open up a garden
Ok that's fine everybody's happy so we're gonna get more population anyway and thats gonna be-
NOOO!
..Alright I'm a little, I'm a little, a feelin' a little spooky, just a little spoop
WaaAAY HEEEY CMON!!
DIIIIICK!!!
Oh hey. I remember you from waayyy later in the game, L-D 3.4.
Yeah I'll try to fix you. I don't know if I can- HOH MY GOD
That was a lot of gold. You had- "I am become fixed" You better "am become helpful" to me. Better come back when you're all better.
I remember you had a log on your legs.
"Name's Molder. If you want to know the truth about everything you're gonna want to hire me." Is that-  a reference to X-FILES?
Yeah ok alright
"I'm gonna go investigate something" Alright ok alright SEE YAAAaAaA!
*high pitched* yyeaaaa? okaaaayyy yeeeaaa??
*screaming* YAAAAY
OH I'M NEVER GAMBLING AGAIN I DONT NEED TO HAZAAAAAHH
This is going well for me. Oh HEY L-D 3.4
"I am truly sorry about earlier. Myyyy circuits were fried. I offer my thanks for your help."
Thank you. Thank YOU
Ohhh thank you! You better be of more help laterrr *becomes spanish and rolls r's*
Oh hi.
"You ever see a treasure chest do a backflip?" N- honestly no. Like honestly and truly
If I'm asking- answering this question honestly- no I have not.
"Well you're not-" oh. *disappointment*
fffFUCK youuuu you little shiiiIITT
"There's been a brawl at the tavern should we arrest
those responsible for starting it?" Now
that's an interesting question, I haven't
seen this before.
I'm gonna say... (high pitched) EEEEEEEEEH, brawls happen
Who am I to say- oh "But they're sure to
cause more trouble if left-" Oh...Well
shit, I did bad that was not the right
call. Well we're growing and that's good so it IIIS
referenced to X-FILES maybe, yes...No, I
don't know--I don't know Molder at all...
OKAY! So now we've made it a good long
way, so now we're going to get into the
thick of it so that was just me getting
to a point where I've made some progress
and maybe seeing a few new things on the
way but now, it's going to start getting
more interesting here, and we're gonna
get to the new stuff, and find how to
beat this game. "By the way, remember
earlier when I mentioned the Council of
Crowns?" Okay, yeah there was something
about that i thought you said "Council of
Crows" but apparently you meant the "Council
of Crowns." What is that?
"I've heard a rumor that one of their members
has been searching the land for a new
ruler to join them."
"Perhaps they're aware of our progress-" I
am a KING! I am a KINGLY KING!
OH, YOU'RE SO CUTE! Ohh, I don't want you to
scare anybody, if I recall something
about that. That's bad for my people!
I don't need you to scare nobody, thank you very much!
Okay, goodbye! "I'm back. I discovered an
alien conspiracy to cover up large
amounts of gold. Do you believe in aliens?"
Yes I do, cuz one just walked in my
front door why do- would I not? "Good to know
there are other believers out there."
Okay goodbye, Molder! Oh, hi! "It seems your
court is without cake" - "I'm a cake chef" Yessss
YESSSS. Oh, you're cakeful - you're grateful
You're cakeful! I love it.
Oh hey!  "Hey pal, you've been a real great
sport. I wanted to give you this, no strings
attached.
Really." Why don't I trust you? The devil
in Reigns was not nearly as nice as you are
Thank you? Oh, hi. "I'm hungry, can I eat
some folks?" - you've got plenty of gold.
We do have a lot of people and they are pretty happy...
ALRIGHT, okay, you can eat some people. AWW,
they didn't even lose any happiness!
Ah cool! Thanks man, oh you're so good.
Aww, of course I'll pat your belly!
Mr. Boots! Aw, what a little cutie [quieter] what a little cutie...
GRAAANDMAAA! Heck yes! You open up all the soup shops you want!
Ahh, grandma! It's a good day, it's a good day,
That was a good day!
Oh, of course! Welcome 'em in. I like this day we
ended up with a plus - surplus population
and even Chestie ate some people!
Goody, goody, gumdrops...
"I accidentally ate some folks out front,
can I just pay you back with gold?" Yeah, okay
Alright, okay. "Thanks for understa" -
I mean, you already ATE them, I mean I can't exactly
say NO to that, I mean what's the point
in disagreeing -- ah, live and le - luh - eatin
okay... "I've got a friend from witch school
looking to move into town. Could I get a
couple gold to help her move in?"
You want a lot of gold. Alright, fine, as
long as that actually - oh, that's not - OH,
that's fine!
oh that's great, everyone loves witches
apparently, there's a lot more diversity
like to build a granary? Okay - okay - aw that's
fine! I love granaries!
I'M A GREAT KING! HELLO -
Alright, tell a story. "A yellow bird meets
a green bird in the sky. Does the yellow bird
soar higher than the green?" ...Yeeeess? If the
yellow bird is the Sun - "The yellow bird
wheels through the sky! She shimmers in
the sunlight
Oh ho! How lovely!" "High up in the sky, the
Yellowbird meets a bluebird. Does the yellow
bird stop to sing with it?" ...Yeeeeess? "Oh ho! The sweet
musical notes of the two new friends
fill the air. The singing attracts a
flock of nearby birds of all shapes and
colors
the sky is filled with song. What a
lovely ending this story, don't you think?
Albert liked it." I - I imagine that's Holly
right there. "I will have to come visit
you again sometime, kingly person. It's
fun to tell stories with you." It's fun
when I get gold from it, apparently! "Hey there
bud, interested in something a little
bigger? Maybe some kind of devilish
ritual, something along those lines? Lot
of souls would get used up. Like a lot
Guarantee you can afford it, though. I'm not gonna
wipe out your whole city here! Just... lots
of folks. But on the other hand, you'll get
a crazy amount of money. Like, I'm
talkin' serious gold heaps here. I gotta
do it tonight. Moon's special right now. One chance only.
What do you say?"
Well, you know, I-I have a feeling
this is like, the make or break decision
for this game, and you're talking heaps
of gold. I got lots of people, and you
don't say you're gonna wipe out
EVERYBODY, and the moon is right, you did
give me 25 gold, how can I say no to that?
Yeah, alright. HOOOOOOHHH! YEAH!
OH YES! Hoooh-hoo!
I don't care how many people just died horribly,
how many families were br - oh my god! There's so
much gold! "Wo ho ho yoyoyo moboBO! Souls
for money make it so-" oh my god.
"Enjoy your riches, maybe I'll see you
around again sometime who knows?"
Thanks Georgie "Louis was giving out free
cake much to-" oh! oh, that's so nice! And we're
growing! We're still happy!
How is that possible? I'm the greatest
King ever! "My friend from witch school wanted
to thank you so-" OH you made magical
cookies!
It doesn't matter how many people died, I
still get cookies! And cake! I love it!
Oh! Oh no o-oh, a dragon's come!
Oh god! You want to eat my people? Or
you'll take my gold? Oh god what will
no- EAT MY PEOPLE. I sacrificed a
hundred for them.
Take it! How about fu- take- take a pair
of these and then go fuck yourself with
them!
No, I don't give a shit! 30? PFFT *high pitched* WHAT DID THAT DO TO ANYBODY? FUCK YOU!
I've sacrificed more for that "Sir I
heard about the dragon," yes, please
craft it. Yeah, do that. Ok, few hundred, fine,
if it means I get more gold later, I'm ok
with that. "There's a bunch goblins," yeah
kill the goblins, I don't like- I don't like
goblins. Don't like em, nahh.
Hate goblins. God dammit, you ate some
people again!?
all right Chester you u- this is your second
strike though. Ahh, who am I kidding, you
can eat as many people as you want, okay
sure we're all good here. Only 5? That's
a light snack, Chester. You're okay in my
book. It's all an accident, everybody, oh
hi!
No don't chase it away! Ahh, what a cutie.
There's a party god, there's a- everyone
is so damn happy in my kingdom! I love
it!
Everyone is so happy, I am the greatest
King that ever lived! That ever will live.
Ohh, Skully and Molder. I-I think I made
that connection before. Ehhhh... my guys are
already pretty happy, Georgie and, um, we did
already make a deal. I don't wanna spare any of
my gold. Ah, you know what I never got
anywhere by not trusting this guy. I'm gonna trust ya.
Yeah, sure, make me happy. (That's what she said)
that's actually pretty good deal. That's
a lot of happy. "Doesn't matter if it's
good or bad, honestly! I just love making
deals!" Dammit, Georgie's such a good guy, even
though he killed a hundred people. What a- what a
nice, upstanding, whatever he is. (A devil, literally)
"I've got news for you sire the sir- yaaay!
We're 500-strong. There's a festival!
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Let's keep working hard, oh heck yes. I'm working
so hard. "Hey, hows it going? You and me... we really get
along, I wanted to tell you a secret
I actually humans because of a curse a witch
put on me. I'd stop if I could but, you
know, curses... You think you can help me
break the curse? I don't want to keep
eating people forever..."
Aww! Chester, I knew you had a kind soul
down in there! I mean, you probably ate it
and then it's staying trapped, inside but
yeah, sure, I'll help you break the curse.
Oh, keep an eye out for any magical folks
who might be able to break the curse.
I know of a goblin slaying hero. My
partner Skelly told me you have
information about an alien life-form. If this
is true, it could change everything. I'll be
launching my own eblehmbemehmehmehmemehmemhremhmem
Oh, hello you are new I am Yarno of the
comfy kingdom.
You may not believe this, but I am the
Royal assistant of King Pin himself.
Indeed, the very same! I've been noodling
around this kingdom of yours and I-
Oh, wait! What's that over there!" Uh...
Button Boy! Good sir did you happen to see a
blue fellow come through here just now?
Strange noodly limbs? Made of yarn?"
...Yeah? "I knew he was around here
somewhere! I'm gonna find that darned Yarno!
He's been running around claiming to
be King Pin's royal assistant, which of
course, he is not. In fact it is I, Button Boy,
who represents the company kingdom in
the esteemed Council of Crowns.
Have you heard of the Council of Crowns?"
Yes, I've uhh... heard a lot about this amazing
council. "Then you surely you've thought
about joining! perhaps we could work out
a bit of a deal... That Yarno's been giving
me nothing but trouble. If you could
somehow put a stop to his shenanigans,
you might be able to get you meeting with
Pia, the advisor of the Celestial
Kingdom. If anyone would be able to
induct your kingdom into the council, it
would be her.
What do you say? Will you help me catch that darned
yarn?"
Well, I know of a certain grandma that'd
probably stick a needle in that Yarno
of yours.
I'll help. Don't worry. "Once Yarno is out
of the way I'll set up a meeting with
Pia. Thank you for your assistance in
this matter, good sir. I'm sure we will meet
again soon." Thanks Button Boy
Grandma, have I got a job for you!
oh oh grandma don't worry about it
grandma everything's gonna be okay it's
alright it's ok it's the same Mouse from
before is he offering me somethi- yes
mousey he found five coins
thank you
it's running wild should we try to
capture it
Oooooh! Boots is gonna find Yarno ah that
must be it i'll need to provide plenty
of tuna but surely it will be worth the
cost
yeah! Find Yar- wow I think I paid that cat a lot of
gold to find Yarno, but okay alright okay I'm
good for it
oh you can break a curse yes yes oh wait
no wait whoa whoa whoa wait whoa what
you're gonna curse him
wait did that did that say that you were
going to curse him because that's just
gonna make him more ravenous and make him
eat more people three
I don't know about this hello the
gardens done it only took you freakin'
forever i'm very pleased very pleased
your king is pleased some plant people
have sprouted in the gardens are we
allowed to make them official citizens
Yeeeeessss? Are they going to pay taxes are
they gonna rise up and revolt like the
tree trunks did before
I'm gonna go with yes and then I'm gonna
try not to kill everybody my broom's all
worn out and it's my birthday... Bwah! Boohoo!
alright better not be expensive
Oh god, it's expensive. Uggggh.
Ah, hello... devised the blueprint for a
gold generating machine it will take
some time and many resources but it'll produce
gold steadily for the rest of eternity!
Alright i got the gold
Alright ok let's see where this goes
ok oh hey "I'm working on a video game
this new thing I came up with think
it'll catch on?" Hell yeah! alright okay
sell it and give me the money its game
you play with others to go around
killing monsters you get a sword
yeah okay so it's great right when you
slay a monster you get experience points
and hey, are you still listening
yeah yes i am good well thanks for
listening to my idea thanks for the gold
I suppose scientists have constructed a
large factory for their work on gold
generation pollution becomes a problem
for nearby homes who cares they're happy
enough as it is they could sacrifice a
little happiness
oh hey hello I'm from a neighboring
ocean kingdom what a lovely castle you
have although it's quite dry
have you ever been to the ocean kingdom
no no i haven't i see not much of a
swimmer are you I can't fault you for
that
oh alright bye I want to go all right
i'm gonna leave the kingdom now to
pursue my dream of becoming a game dev
goodbye
alright goodbye was lovely to have you
whoa maybe our paths will cross again
one day probably not though take this
cock to remember me by
oh that's so sweet he's gone forever
wow nice guy
yay were over a thousand now we've made
a lot of progress we met some new people
but we got a lot more to do we still
have to kill that goddamn dragon we
gotta make that gold-making machine
yes oh geez additional funding hundred
gold
alright fine
this better be a lot of golden generates
not just one a day to generate know the
boundary of your expanding city is
beginning to conflict with the border of
my nation
more specifically your workers begins
constructing offense in my backyard is
made even more fronting by the fact that
my backyard is underwater
I demand that you cease construction of
this fence and maintain your border at
its current position
yes good novel excuse me I've got some
cleaning up around my property I don't
know what that did or what ramifications
that had oh I'm retrieve the Western ok
ah oh-oh no oh-oh
ah I so much gold i killed so many
people for this load but they caused me
such a problem
ok go okay this gold-making machine
better work i will speak be speaking
with your mason immediately regarding
matters of sustainable wood land
harvesting you've done the right thing
here my good three focal respect that
spider woodcutters aggression with this
I bid you good day maybe Richard trip
and strong alright thank you for not
being a little shit oh ah no ah ok
no not today little Fang and a bad i
gotta 1i gotta kill this dragon number
two my gold making machines got to be
done
number three I need a sandwich yeah a
couple t actually very nice what the
curse has been lifted I'm not hungry for
humans anymore this is great I feel so
free maybe i can find something better
to do with all my money now like charity
work or something
the whole new Chester well check no way
out just with just her i like the fact
that you
gave me money alright just her okay just
did okay just do it better be done it
better be done it better be door your
loyal move him women now more mouths
hope
did you get him did you find your know
hey you got me that catches wouldn't
leave me alone until I came back here
was a button boy was on the cat has been
trying to steal my position as advisor
for years he claims to be the true
advisor but it's just the lie is only a
button after all I yaar know the blue
and the true advisor to the comfy
kingdom accept no substitute
what's got her on okay yeah okay
guards see that yarn well done sir i'm
not sure how about how much apart you
actually played in this with yarn has
been found
I'm in a generous mood so I'll set up a
meeting with advisor Pia the celestial
kingdom
she's quite pretty but you should expect
her to come by soon make sure this
castle is nicely clean you'll want to
impress her
ok no no wonderful to see you again
kingly person although on the bit sad
Albert and I are going to be leaving we
like to wander and besides we must not
overstay our welcome
we'll be on our way tonight but might we
have your blessing before we go
yeah I'll be sad to see you go was so
lovely to have met you I wish you
nothing but happiness
oh if only you knew how many people I
killed for money all my kingdoms done
nice oh you better have it done
300 300
it
yeah oh god someone gave me called
someone give me go right now right now
yes
ok roof rafter we need that money yeah
we need that money we can do without
people fuck yeah but good god we needed
that money who i was close i was way too
close
hey all right we got enough happiness
okay okay
climbing back from the brink you know
what let's roll the dice let's see what
happens
oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah okay Lady Luck
is smiling on us once again
oh the dragonblade Oh purchase some
top-quality but we need you you do your
thing because if we can kill that
goddamn dragon then we're gonna get some
goddamn money and king of keep our
goddamn kingdom in line all grandma
thank you i'm gonna take that morning
I'm gonna take it
oh no you would let her know you're fine
come on you're fine forgive me Oh kind
and gracious Lord bless you
you're fine dude I need you to kill the
dragon anyway man that council better at
that goddamn gold-making machine done
this cost me like fucking 12-under gold
if there be lots of room
oh hello oh it's advisor Pia greetings
I'm peer advisor to King and dramatists
of the celestial kingdom a beautiful
castle you have here everything is
spotless
I was just wandering through your city
and was quite impressed with your
citizens you know the Council of crowns
is searching for a fifth member is that
something you'd be interested in hell
yeah oh yeah oh yeah yeah yeah oh my was
that the woman from the celestial
kingdom
oh you know it is is so exciting the
celestial King sits at the head of the
Council of crowns any connection with
them will surely do as well in the
future i know i know it i'm aware i know
it
oh good job man you're doing great I
just gotta kill this dragon
yes
feel very lucky oh that's not right i
didn't need to do that juice
dude you oh god fine workers you can
take you can take workers that's fine
you can take people that's fine just
give me my goddamn gold dude get this
gold-making machine done and I won't
kill you have been asked by a warrior
tribe to the south to supply great
number of weapons have your permission
to supply them i'll need them extra gold
to fill the order
yeah okay hope they don't attack us with
your weapons
make way make way for King Andromeda's
lord of the celestial kingdom he is here
to bless us with his astral oh my god
you're floating you don't always need to
make such a fuss about my entrance via
anyway yes hello good king I've heard
about you and your people in the
counselor quite impressed with you and
would love to induct you that's just one
small issue before the existing council
members must be present to induct the
new member but I'm afraid Queen
chanterelle and Queen Sara they're
having a bit of a fight at the moment
will need to calm them down and settle
their dispute before you can join the
council you should be hearing from their
advisors shortly i'm entrusting you with
the task of reconciling the two queens
best of luck to you and afterwards that
seat on the council shall be yours
ok so this is interesting
I'll keep an eye out for the advisors
from the ocean and plant kingdom sir i'm
sure we can settle whatever is troubling
their Queens so this is this is
interesting ok I've been playing for
nearly an hour here all God you put on a
show we're already happy enough shut the
fuck up
but this game now has a save mechanic so
on the horizon
I need to slay a dragon finished
gold-making machine reconcile two queens
and then join the celestial kingdom or
not the celestial kingdom the Council of
crowns so hopefully I can get to that
but this is just getting a bit too long
for one episode here so i'm actually
gonna finish this up in another one so
thank you everybody so much for watching
and as always I will see
you in the next video bye
ok
