♪ Music ♪
>> GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE.
FACULTY, STAFF, STUDENT BODY, I
WOULD LIKE TO WELCOME YOU TO THE
GREAT EVENT.
THE BLACK STUDENT UNION AND I
WOULD LIKE TO THINK THE WALK-INS
FOR HIS -- D. WATKINS FOR HIS
CONTRIBUTION.
>> THANK YOU.
WE ARE FORTUNATE AND PROUD TO BE
COSPONSORING THIS EVENT WITH THE
STUDENT UNION AND WE REALLY
APPRECIATE YOUR EFFORTS TO HELP
US HAVE THIS EVENT BE POWERFUL.
I WOULD LIKE TO WELCOME
EVERYBODY TO THE SYMPOSIA.
WE ARE IN OUR 12TH SEMESTER,
SIXTH YEAR.
BRINGING TO YOU STIMULATING
TOPICS.
BEFORE WE BEGIN, I WOULD LIKE TO
THINK THOSE OF YOU -- THANK
THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE COME
REGULARLY AND OUR PROVOST
MARGARET WHO IS WITH US TONIGHT.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
AND THE FACULTY WHO HAVE
ENCOURAGED THEIR STUDENTS TO
ATTEND AND ALL THE MEMBERS OF
THE GERMANTOWN I.T. FOR MAKING
THIS PROGRAM AVAILABLE ONLINE.
IN THE AUDIENCE TONIGHT, I WOULD
LIKE TO RECOGNIZE A SPECIAL
GUEST, AND SHE IS JUSTINE
FISHER, THE ARTIST OF THE
ART EXHIBIT IN THE HALL.
THE TITLE OF HER ART EXHIBIT IS
OPEN SEASON, SOCIAL MEMORIALS,
AND SHE HAS TOLD ME SHE WOULD BE
WILLING TO ANSWER QUESTIONS
ABOUT HER ART AFTER THE TALK BY
D. WATKINS AND AS YOU CAN TELL,
THEY ARE LIFE-SIZED PORTRAITS OF
PEOPLE SUCH AS FREDDIE GRAY,
JORDAN DAVIS, TO LIVE ON MARGIN,
AND XANDER BLAND, AND THEY ARE
RIGHT IN KEEPING WITH THE THEME
OF TONIGHT'S TALK OF SOCIAL
JUSTICE.
ONCE AGAIN, THANK YOU, JUSTINE,
FOR YOUR FABULOUS ART.
I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE A SPECIAL
THANK YOU TO THE PROFESSOR OF
HISTORY AT TAKOMA PARK AND WHO
HAS WORKED TO CONVINCE D.
WATKINS TO SPEAK TO US THIS
EVENING. WE ARE GRATEFUL TO THE
PROFESSOR, AND HERE HE IS.
>> THANK YOU.
BEFORE WE GET STARTED, I WOULD
LIKE TO THANK FOR ARTIST
MARGARET RIEMER AND FOLKS WHO
WERE INSTRUMENTAL IN MAKING
TONIGHT HAPPEN.
DEANS IN THE HUMANITY DIVISION.
I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE ANOTHER
THANK YOU TO YOU GUYS FOR
ORGANIZING THIS.
TODAY IS A SPECIAL DAY FOR
MONTGOMERY COLLEGE.
THIS IS OUR FIRST SIGNATURE
EVENT FOR OUR NEW INSTITUTE FOR
RACE AND COMMUNITY ENGAGEMENT,
WHICH WILL WE -- WE WILL BE
HEARING ABOUT IN THE MONTHS
AHEAD.
D. WATKINS IS AN EDITOR AT LARGE
FOR SALON, HIS WORK HAS BEEN
PUBLISHED IN THE NEW YORK TIMES,
THE GUARDIAN, ROLLING STONE,
AMONG OTHER PUBLICATIONS.
HE CALLED A MASTERS IN EDUCATION
AND MSA IN CREATIVE WRITING FROM
THE OVERSEER BALTIMORE.
HE FOUNDED THE WRITERS PROJECT
AND TEACHERS AT THE OVERSEER
BALTIMORE.
HE HAS BEEN A RECIPIENT OF
NUMEROUS AWARDS.
HE WAS FEATURED IN BALTIMORE
BUSINESS JOURNAL AS BEING ONE OF
THE TOP OR THE UNDER 40 TO
WATCH, AND HE WAS FEATURED IN
OPRAH MAGAZINE.
HE HAS BEEN AT GUEST COMMENTATOR
ON MEET THE PRESS, MSNBC, CNN,
AND NPR.
HE WAS THE AUTHOR OF THE NEW
YORK TIMES BESTSELLER THE COOK
UP, AND LIVING AND DYING WHILE
BLACK IN AMERICA.
HE LIVES IN EAST BALTIMORE.
A COLLEAGUE OF MINE AND LONGTIME
FRIEND, ERIC SINGER, TAUGHT D AT
THE UNIVERSITY OF BALTIMORE WAY
BACK WHEN.
HE USED TO TELL ME I HAD TO MEET
THE STUDENTS,, D, THAT HE WAS
SO REMARKABLE.
I MET HIM A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO
AND WE QUICKLY BECAME FRIENDS.
THERE IS NO DOUBT THAT D IS A
GIFTED WRITER.
IT IS WHAT HE CHOOSES TO DO WITH
HIS WRITING, WHY I RESPECT HIM
SO MUCH.
IF YOU GO ONLINE AND SEE EVENT
AFTER EVENT WHERE HE IS MEETING
WITH STUDENTS, MANY FROM
ECONOMICALLY DEPRESSED AREAS,
TEACHING THEM THE IMPORTANCE OF
READING AND WRITING AND HOW IT
CHANGED HIS LIFE, WALKED THROUGH
THE STREETS OF EAST BALTIMORE
AND YOU WILL HEAR ABOUT A MAN
WHO CONTINUES TO HELP HIS
COMMUNITY.
WE HAVE DECIDED -- IT IS HIS
GREATEST GIFT.
IT IS WHY I HAVE BEEN WANTING TO
BRING HIM HERE TO SPEAK WITH OUR
STUDENTS SINCE THE FIRST DAY WE
MET. IT IS MY GREAT HONOR TO
INTRODUCE YOU A WRITER,
PROFESSOR, TRUTH TELLER, AND MY
FRIEND, D. WATKINS. [APPLAUSE]
>> ONE MORE TIME FOR THE
PROFESSOR FOR SAYING ALL OF
THOSE GREAT THINGS.
IT'S ALL MADE UP. IT'S A JOKE.
ONE MORE TIME FOR JUSTINE AND
HER AMAZING ARTWORK.
IT IS SO BEAUTIFUL.
I WAS SO INSPIRED WHEN I WALKED
IN. IT WAS GREAT. [APPLAUSE]
>> ANY MENTORS IN HERE?
CLAP IT UP FOR THE MENTOR IN THE
BACK. [APPLAUSE]
>> I BELIEVE IN MENTORSHIP, IT
IS SO IMPORTANT.
WITHOUT MENTORS, MANY OF US
WOULD NOT BE HERE RIGHT NOW.
WE ARE VERY LUCKY AND VERY
FORTUNATE AND VERY BLESSED TO
HAVE SO MANY DIFFERENT PEOPLE
GIVING PIECES OF THEIR LIVES TO
MAKE SURE THAT WE PROPERLY
RAISED THE NEXT GENERATION.
IF WE DO NOT, THEN IT STOPS.
SOME OF US ARE LUCKY ENOUGH TO
HAVE FAMILY MEMBERS AND FRIENDS
WHO ARE ABLE TO SEE OUR TALENT
AND NURTURE THEM.
WITHOUT MENTORS, THERE WOULD BE
SO MANY LOST PEOPLE.
I'M LITERALLY STANDING RIGHT
HERE BECAUSE OF A FEW GREAT
PEOPLE WHO BELIEVED IN ME.
LATELY, YOU KNOW, THEY SAY, YOU
KNOW, AS YOU GET OLDER, YOU
BECOME YOUR PARENTS, AND I AM
ACTUALLY TURNING INTO MY
GRANDMA. [LAUGHTER]
>> NOT PHYSICALLY, BUT I FIND
MYSELF, I FOUND MYSELF USING --
I FIND MYSELF, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE
COME TO ME WITH PROBLEMS
SOMETIMES, AND HER QUOTES JUST
COME LIKE SHE IS SPEAKING THE ON
THE GRAVE AND INSPIRING ME.
SHE HAS BEEN DEAD FOR 15 YEARS.
I WROTE A COUPLE DOWN.
I WANT TO SHARE THEM WITH YOU.
ONE IS THAT FEAR AND FAITH
CANNOT LIVE IN THE SAME SPACE.
YOU HAVE TO GET OUT THERE AND
TRY TO A COLLEGE THOSE THINGS
THAT YOU DREAM ABOUT, AND
SOMETIMES, YOU ARE GOING TO
FALL, BUT IT IS OK BECAUSE THERE
IS NO SUCH THING AS FAILURE.
THESE ARE ALL LEARNING
EXPERIENCES.
THAT WAS MILES DAVIS.
TWO, WHEN YOU ARE LOST, EVERY
DIRECTION IS RIGHT, SO TRY
SOMETHING.
EVERY DIRECTION IS RIGHT WHEN
YOU ARE LOST, SO TRY SOMETHING.
THE MOST IMPORTANT, THE MOST
IMPORTANT THING SHE EVER TOLD ME
AS SOMETHING THAT MAKES IT INTO
MY WORK, SOMETHING THAT IS JUST
A PART OF MY LIFE.
YOU ARE NEVER SUPPOSED TO LOOK
DOWN ON THE PERSON UNLESS YOU
ARE PULLING THEM UP.
NEVER LOOK DOWN ON A PERSON
UNLESS YOU'RE PULLING THEM UP.
YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT THEY CAN
OFFER AND THEIR TALENT AND SKILL
SETS. D. WATKINS: AGAIN, WITHOUT
MENTORS PULLING ME UP, I WOULD
NOT BE WILLING TO DO SOME OF
THE THINGS I'M LUCKY ENOUGH TO
DO TODAY, SO I WANT TO READ ONE
CHAPTER FROM BOTH OF MY BOOKS,
BOTH OF THEM ARE REALLY QUICK.
JUST TO GIVE YOU AN IDEA OF SOME
OF THE THINGS I WRITE ABOUT.
THIS IS A PIECE OF THE
INTRODUCTION FROM THE B SIDE.
ONE NIGHT, I PARTICIPATED IN A
PEACEFUL PROTEST NEAR DOWNTOWN
BALTIMORE.
MY FELLOW PROTESTERS AND I WERE
STANDING IN SOLIDARITY WITH THE
CITIZENS OF FERGUSON, MISSOURI,
OVER THE MURDER OF MIKE BROWN,
THE TEEN ON HIS WAY TO COLLEGE
WHEN HE WAS CUT DOWN BY
POLICEMEN'S BULLETS.
IT FELT GOOD TO UNITE WITH WHOM
A DIFFERENT PEOPLE FOR THE SAME
CAUSE.
A DIVERSE GROUP OF HANDMADE
SIGNS AND A SHARED SENSE OF
OUTRAGE.
EVEN AS WE SHOUTED FOR JUSTICE,
I KNEW IT WAS NOT ENOUGH.
I DO HAVE AN IMMENSE AMOUNT OF
RESPECT FOR PROTESTERS, MARCHES,
AND ORGANIZERS, BUT IN THE END,
AFTER ALL THAT CHANTING AND
MARCHING, WILSON, THE COP WHO
MURDERED BROWN, STILL WENT FREE
AND COPS IN AMERICA STILL FEEL
COMFORTABLE KILLING INNOCENT
BLACK PEOPLE.
EVERY TIME A BLACK BODY FALLS AT
THE HANDS OF A COP, THE SAME
PROTESTS IN CAPS ON ONE SIDE,
AND THE SAME NAIVE VOICES ECHO
THE SAME NONSENSE ON THE OTHER.
IF THEY WERE INNOCENT, WHY DID
THEY RUN?
WHY DID THEY ATTACK AN OFFICER?
WHY DID THEY NOT OBEY?
I GET WHERE THESE CONFUSED
VOICES COME FROM IN A PERFECT
WORLD.
INNOCENT PEOPLE SHOULD NOT HAVE
TO RUN AND PROTECT THEMSELVES
FROM THE PEOPLE RESPONSIBLE FOR
PROTECTING THEM, HOWEVER,
AMERICA IS FAR FROM PERFECT, AND
AFRICAN-AMERICANS ARE ABOUT AS
SAFE AS A CHUNK OF STATE IN A
DEN FULL OF STARVING LIONS.
IT DOES NOT MATTER IF YOU STAY
OR FIGHT OR RUN.
EITHER WAY, THEY WILL MURDER
YOU.
FREDDIE GRAY IN BALTIMORE RAN
AND WHEN THEY CAUGHT HIM, HE WAS
MURDERED.
WALTER SCOTT WAS MURDERED, TOO.
OSCAR WAS FACEDOWN ON THE GROUND
WITH CUFFS DOWN AND THEY
MURDERED HIM.
JOHN CRAWFORD WAS MINDING HIS
OWN BUSINESS SHOPPING IN
WALMART. HE WAS MURDERED.
MIKE BROWN IN FERGUSON, WHO WE
WERE RALLYING THAT NIGHT FOR IN
BALTIMORE, PUT HIS HAND UP AND
THE COPS WHO HOLDS THROUGH HIM.
SEAN WAS JUST TRYING TO GET
MARRIED AND POLICE KILLED HIM.
ERIC GARDNER PLEADED FOR HIS
LIFE AFTER HE WAS IN CUSTODY, ON
VIDEO, IN PUBLIC HIM.
SEAN WAS JUST TRYING TO GET
MARRIED AND POLICE KILLED HIM.
ERIC, BROAD
DAYLIGHT, AND THEY STILL KILLED
HIM. IRVING WAS MENTALLY ILL,
PARTIALLY DEAF, HAD HIS PANTS
HANGING LOW AND POLICE TASERED
HIM TO DEATH FOR THAT.
COP SHOT HIM TO DEATH AS HE
REACHED OUT TO THEM FOR
ASSISTANCE.
TAMIR RICE WAS ONLY 12.
BEING A KID CANNOT SAVE YOU.
HE WAS MURDERED.
MCCARROLL AND THINGS WITH WAS
KILLED -- IN ST. LOUIS WAS
KILLED.
GRAHAM IN NEW YORK TRY TO RUN
INTO HIS HOME AND GOT HIM.
CATHERINE JOHNSON, SHE WAS
RELAXING AT HER HOME, AND POLICE
STAMPEDED IN MY COWBOYS AND
KILLED HER IN A BOTCHED DRUG
RAID.
HE WAS MINDING HIS OWN BUSINESS
WITH NO WEAPON AND WAS KILLED
FOR THAT. FOR THAT.
YOU CAN BE FROM AFRICA WERE
KNOWN AS A NICE GUY AROUND
BALTIMORE MIKE TYRONE WEST OR
ANTHONY ANDERSON.
IT DOES NOT MATTER.
NO BAD PERSON IS SAFE.
THESE KILLINGS HAPPEN ON MOST
EVERY DAY IN AMERICA, SO MUCH
THAT THE NEWSPAPERS SHOULD PRINT
A DAILY DEATH COUNT WITH PHOTOS
OF CASUALTIES LIKE THEY DO FOR
WARTIME BECAUSE IN BLACK
AMERICA, IT IS WARTIME.
ALL OF THESE OFFICERS WHO COMMIT
THESE HEINOUS ACTS ARE FOUND
INNOCENT.
THE OFFICERS BILL OF RIGHTS
EXISTS IN EVERY STATE.
IN MARYLAND, WHERE WE LIVE,
POLICE OFFICERS GET 10 DAYS
BEFORE THEY EVEN HAVE TO THINK
ABOUT -- SPEAK ABOUT THE
KILLINGS THEY ARE INVOLVED IN.
THAT WAS HALF OF THE
INTRODUCTION TO THEB SIDE.
WHEN I PUT THIS BOOK OUT, I WAS
DONE WITH PROTESTS.
ALL OF THESE THINGS, THEY TIE
THEM TO THE SAME DAY, SO FREDDIE
GRAY'S MURDER, HE WAS TAKEN TO
THE HOSPITAL AND
BALTIMORE EXPLODES.
I HAVE A FRIEND, A YOUNG FRIEND,
FULL OF ENERGY AND HE IS
TALENTED, A GREAT SPEAKER, AND
HE CAME ALIVE DURING THE
BALTIMORE UPRISING.
HE DECIDED HE WANTED TO DEDICATE
HIS LIFE TO ACTIVISM.
EVERYTHING WAS A PROTEST.
GAS PRICES GO FROM $2.50 TO
TWO DOLLARS TO THE TWO CENTS,
AND HE'S LIKE, WE HAVE TO
PROTEST.
I'M WORKING ON THIS BOOK, I HAVE
A LOT OF IDEAS, SO I'M WORKING
ON TWO DIFFERENT
PROJECTS AT THE SAME TIME AND I
GET A PHONE CALL FROM HIM.
YOU KNOW, AT THE TIME, I WAS ON
THE HEALTH KIT, TRYING TO GET
INTO HEALTHY FOODS, SO I HAD
CEREAL FROM TRADER JOE'S, AND
ALMOND MILK, YOU KNOW?
I PURCHASED THESE THINGS.
I HAD THEM SET UP AND
COLOR-CODED, AND TRYING TO GET
MY LIFE TOGETHER, AND CALLED ME
UP AND USE LIKE, " MEET ME
ON NORTH AVENUE AND 15 MINUTES."
THIS GUY IS 22 AND AT THE TIME,
I'M LIKE 33 OR SOMETHING.
I'M LIKE, WHY IS HE TALKING TO
ME LIKE THIS. THIS IS CRAZY.
I'M OLDER.
I MEAN, YOU KNOW, ADULTS KNOW.
[LAUGHTER]
D. WATKINS: SO WHATEVER, I POUR
MY CEREAL IN A BOWL, AND MY
FRIEND RINGS AGAIN AND HE'S
LIKE, "WHERE ARE YOU AT?"
WAIT, WAIT, WHAT'S GOING ON?
LOOK, MAN, WE ABOUT TO GO DO
THIS PROTEST, MAN.
I NEED YOU TO MEET ME ON NORTH
AVENUE ASAP.
THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT, ALL
RIGHT?
WEAR ALL BLACK AND MEET ME IN 15
MINUTES. HE HUNG UP AGAIN.
I'M LIKE, OK, WHATEVER.
I POUR MY MILK IN THE BOWL.
I'M HUNGRY.
I'M A WRITER, SO MY BUDGET WAS
REAL SLIM, MODEL SLIM, SO I HAD
TO BE CAREFUL WITH MY MONEY AND
BOUGHT BACK, SO I'M EATING MY
CEREAL, AND HE CALLS BACK AGAIN.
AND THIS TIME, I CUT HIM OFF.
"WHAT'S UP, MAN? WAS GOING ON?"
HE SAID, THEY ARE BUILDING A
KIDDIE JAIL.
WE ARE GOING TO LIE DOWN IN
TRAFFIC.
WEAR ALL BLACK AND MIMI IN SEVEN
MINUTES.
I SAID NO, MAN, I'M NOT COMING.
HE SAID, YOU WRITE A LIST OF
ABOUT WHAT IS GOING ON AND YOU
CAN'T -- HE GOES ON TO RANT.
IF ANYONE KNOWS ANYTHING ABOUT
TRADER JOE'S CEREAL, I PUT THE
MILK AND TWO MINUTES AGO.
YOU HAVE A 1.5 MINUTE WINDOW
BEFORE IT IS SOGGY.
NOW, I JUST WASTED LIKE SEVEN
DOLLARS IF THE LICENSE OF
CEREAL, -- $7.65 CENTS IN CEREAL
SO I HAVE TO HEAR THIS OUT.
THEY ARE BUILDING A KIDDIE JAIL,
WE ARE GOING TO LIE DOWN IN
TRAFFIC. I SAID, "BRO, IF WE LIE
DOWN IN TRAFFIC, WHY WOULD WE
WEAR ALL BLACK?"
BEYOND THAT, AND I WAS AWARE OF
THE STORY AND I KNEW ABOUT THIS
JAIL AND I KNEW WHAT WAS GOING
ON.
SO I SAID, "LOOK, I'M LIKE YOU.
I DON'T THINK THEY SHOULD BUILD
THIS JAIL, BUT I ALSO KNOW, YOU
--"
HE IS FROM SUBURB TYPE AREA AND
I'M FROM THE STREETS, AND I DO
WORK IN THE STREETS AND I WORK
IN THE COMMUNITY, IN THE JAILS,
THESE DIFFERENT PLACES, SO I
KNOW THAT A WHOLE LOT OF KIDS
WHO ARE LIKE 14 AND 15 YEARS OLD
WOULD BE FORCED TO BE HOUSED
WITH GROWN MEN BECAUSE THE
KIDDIE JAIL TO WERE OVERFLOWING
WITH YOUNG PEOPLE, SO IT IS NOT
ENOUGH TO GET THROUGH THE TRAUMA
OF BEING IN JAIL AS A MINOR, BUT
IMAGINE DOING THAT AROUND A
BUNCH OF MEN THAT ARE 35 AND 40
YEARS OLD AND YOUR 14,
15-YEAR-OLD KID, SO NO, I DON'T
WANT THE JAIL, BUT I DON'T THINK
THEY SHOULD BE HOUSED WITH
ADULTS, SO YOU KNOW, THE BIGGER
KIDS WOULD FIGURE OUT, HOW ARE
WE GOING TO KEEP OUR YOUNG
PEOPLE OUT OF THE SYSTEM AND
ALSO DON'T THINK LYING DOWN IN
TRAFFIC IS GOING TO GET WHAT WE
DESIRE. IT SEEMS LIKE A PLOY FOR
ATTENTION, SO NO, I'M NOT GOING.
AND THEY DID NOT GO, AND OF
COURSE, HE DID NOT GET MAD AT ME
AND THEY LIED DOWN IN TRAFFIC
AND EVERYTHING IS STILL ON
SCHEDULE.
FOR ME, IT WAS A BIG TAKE AWAY
FOR ME, BECAUSE YOU KNOW, I
REALIZED THAT MY JOB IS TO GET
YOUNG PEOPLE THINKING CRITICALLY
, TO PUT THE STORIES AND IDEAS
IN BOOKS AND INTO THEIR HANDS SO
THEY CAN FALL HIM UP WITH
READING AND TELLING THEIR OWN
STORY BECAUSE IF YOU LIVE IN A
SOCIETY WHERE YOU ARE NOT ABLE
TO TELL YOUR DOOR IT, YOU'RE
GIVING THEM THE SPACE TO YOU
ALIVE.
WHY WAS TAMIR RICE AND MIKE
BROWN KILLED AND 15 SECONDS, 20
SECONDS -- IN 15 SECONDS, 20
SECONDS?
YOU COULD ONLY DO THAT TO A
PERSON YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND OR
PERSON YOU DO NOT EVEN SEE OTHER
PERSON.
THAT IS ONE OF THE FUNDAMENTAL
THINGS THAT IS MISSING FROM OUR
CLASSROOMS THAT I WANT TO WORK
ON AND THAT I TRY TO WORK ON, SO
I AM MORE POWERFUL FIGHTING THAT
SYSTEM.
I'M MORE POWERFUL FIGHTING THAT
SYSTEM THAN I AM LINED DOWN IN
THE STREET.
YOU KNOW, BUT SOMEBODY ELSE
LIGHT ON IN THE STREET.
I SHOULD NOT BE LYING DOWN IN
THE STREET.
I SHOULD BE USING SOME OF MY
RESOURCES TO GET YOUNG PEOPLE
EXCITED ABOUT READING AND
TELLING THEIR STORIES.
I AM MORE POWERFUL THAT WAY, SO,
YOU KNOW, THAT WAS A BIG TAKE
AWAY FOR ME.
I WILL TELL YOU A LITTLE BIT
ABOUT WHAT I AM DOING NOW AND
GET INTO MY OWN PERSONAL STORY.
RIGHT NOW, I HAVE LIKE 30 JOBS.
I DO THESE TALKS ALL OVER THE
COUNTRY.
I ACTUALLY JUST GOT BACK FROM
CUBA LAST NIGHT, WHICH WAS COOL.
YOU GUYS SHOULD GO OVER THERE.
BUT I DO THESE TALKS ALL OVER
THE COUNTRY.
I'M DEVELOPING A TV SHOW WITH
A&E.
I'VE BEEN GOING DOWN TO FERGUSON
A LOT TO WORK WITH MIKE BROWN'S
FAMILY ON A PROJECT, POTENTIALLY
A FILM.
EDITOR IN LARGE FOR SALON.COM.
I TEACH AT JOHN HOPKINS
UNIVERSITY IN THE GRADUATE
SCHOOL OF CHILDHOOD EDUCATION
AND I'M ON THE STAFF AT
UNIVERSITY OF BALTIMORE TEACHING
CREATIVE WRITING COURSES, SO I
GET TO PUBLISH IN A LOT OF
DIFFERENT PLACES SO I'M VERY
LUCKY AND FORTUNATE AND BLESSED.
IT WAS NOT ALWAYS LIKE THAT, SO
IT GIVES YOU THE FIRST CHAPTER
TO TALK ABOUT SOME OF THE
THINGS.
EVERYBODY IS GOOD, RIGHT? OK.
TECHNOLOGY MAKES THINGS
DISAPPEAR.
WE USED TO CARRY BOOKS AROUND
AND WE USED TO HAVE RECORDS AND
NOW, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE
MUSIC COMES FROM.
IT IS STORED ON A FILE SOMEWHERE
IN SPACE.
IT USED TO BE LIKE -- IT USED TO
TAKE UP SPACE ON YOUR PHONE AND
NOW IT IS IN THE CLOUDS AND
DIFFERENT PLACES.
IT IS SO INTERESTING.
THIS IS THE FIRST CHAPTER OF MY
BOOK, "THE COOK UP."
I SAW BULLETS RIPPED THROUGH THE
FACES OF ADOLESCENCE, MOTHERS
ABANDON THEIR KIDS, I SAW
FATHERS KNOW OUT FOR MILK AND
NEVER RETURN, I THOUGHT KIDS
TURNING TO KILLERS, COPS STILL
-- GRANDPARENT RAISING INFANTS
AROUND HERE. I SAW THE DEVIL.
I THOUGHT A GUY SHAKE THE GUYS
HAND FOR WHIPPING OUT HIS GUN
AND MAKING THAT GUY PUT HIS
HANDS UP.
WE GO THROUGH MIDLIFE CRISIS IS
AT 15 AROUND HERE.
I SAW FRIENDS KILL FRIENDS, I
SAW FRIENDS KILL FRIEND AND THEN
ATTEND THEIR WAKES.
I THOUGHT TEACHERS TELL KIDS
THEY WOULD DIE LIKE A PARENTS OR
SIBLINGS.
WHAT DOES HOPE LOOK LIKE?
I SAW BAGS FIRST, THAT STILL,
BRAINS ON THE CURB, LIMBS
KNOCKED OFF, FACES REARRANGED,
AND FLESH CHUNKS.
I SAW FLESH SIZZLE LIKE ST EAKS.
WE ALSO MEDICAID AROUND HERE.
I SMELL MURDER.
I SAW BAREFOOT FAMILIES.
I SAW ALL TYPES OF DREAMS SPARK
AND FADE.
I SAW HOUSE RAIDS, FAMILIES OF
IT DID, AIDS SPREAD, THOUSANDS
MADE AND LOST IN THE MIDDLE OF A
PLACE WHERE COPS ENFORCE,
TERRORIZE, AND COLLECT.
I SAW IT ALL.
THAT IS EAST BALTIMORE.
THAT IS MY SOCIAL CONTEXT.
THAT IS WHERE I AM FROM, THAT IS
WHAT MY IDEA OF NORMALCY IS
PURE TO A CERTAIN EXTENT, YOU
KNOW, -- NORMALCY IS.
TO A CERTAIN EXTENT, THERE IS A
LOT OF LOVE BURIED.
PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW THE REALITY.
AGAIN, YOU HAVE TO BE ABLE TO
TELL YOUR STORY SO PEOPLE CAN
UNDERSTAND YOUR PERSPECTIVE AND
WHERE YOU COME FROM.
MINE REALLY STARTED FOR ME
BASICALLY WHEN MY BROTHER LEFT
HOME. HE WAS 17.
HE WAS A SLICK GUY, TALENTED,
FUNNY, ONE OF THOSE GUYS WHO
NEVER REALLY SAID TOO MUCH, BUT
WHEN HE OPENED HIS MOUTH,
EVERYBODY LAUGHED OR WOULD NOT
IN AGREEMENT.
DASHWOODN -- WOULD NOD IN
AGREEMENT.
EVERYBODY WANTED TO BE LIKE HIM.
EVERY WOMAN WANTED TO DATE HIM.
OUR FRIENDS MOM'S.
THEY ALL HAD THEIR CALENDARS
MARKED OFF, SO THEY HAD A LOT OF
LOVE FOR HIM AND I WANTED TO BE
JUST LIKE HIM.
IF I'M GOING TO BE LIKE HIM,
THEN I HAVE TO GET OUT ON THE
CORNER AND PARTICIPATE IN THE
DRUG TALK, SO COME OUTSIDE WHEN
I WAS 12 YEARS OLD, 13 YEARS
OLD, I WOULD ROLL MY SLEEVES UP
AND SAY, "WHAT'S GOING ON OUT
HERE?"
AND HE WOULD SAY, "GO IN THE
HOUSE. THIS IS NOT FOR YOU.
YOU ARE NOT A TOUGH GUY.
YOU NEED TO BE THE FIRST PERSON
IN THIS FAMILY TO GO TO COLLEGE.
YOU NEED TO ACTUALLY GO."
AND I WOULD SAY, "YOU ARE NOT IN
COLLEGE."
HE WOULD SAY, I DON'T KNOW ALL
THE ANSWERS, BUT THIS AIN'T IT.
THIS IS NOT IT.
AT FIRST, I DID NOT GET IT
BECAUSE LIKE I SAID, EVERYONE
WANTED TO BE LIKE HIM.
SOME OF MY FRIENDS WHEN WE
TURNED 15, THEY STARTED MIXING
IN WITH DIFFERENT CREWS AND
SELLING DRUGS, TOO.
AND THEN I SAW THE REALITY OF
WHAT MY BROTHER WAS TALKING
ABOUT.
I HAD FRIENDS WHO WERE LIKE 15
YEARS OLD, 16 YEARS OLD, WORKING
90 HOUR WEEKS AND HE DID NOT
REALLY HAVE THE MONEY TO SHOW
FOR IT.
"YOU WANT TO GO TO THE PARTS,
RIDE DIRT BIKES?"
AND THEY'D SAY, I CAN'T.
I WOULD COME ON THE BLOG LIKE, I
MET THIS GIRL TALK SHOW, SHE HAS
A SISTER.
YOU TRY TO GO TO THE MOVIES, YO,
I KNOW HER SISTER, I CAN'T GO.
I HAVE TO FINISH MY SHIFT.
YOU HAVE KIDS WORKING THE
FULL-TIME JOBS.
PAUL RYAN SAYS THAT PEOPLE DON'T
WORK. [LAUGHTER]
D. WATKINS: YOU HAVE THESE KIDS
WORKING THESE FULL-TIME JOBS AND
I WOULD SIT BACK AND SAY SELLING
DRUGS IS THE MOST HORRIBLE THING
IN THE WORLD A PERSON CAN DO.
WHY WOULD ANYBODY IN THEIR RIGHT
MIND WANT TO DO THIS?
I CAN SAY THIS BECAUSE MY
BROTHER WAS OUT THERE AND HE
USED TO BUY ME ALL OF THESE, YOU
KNOW, WHATEVER, A KID THAT IS 15
YEARS OLD, FOR WHATEVER
NEIGHBORHOOD.
VIDEO GAMES, I WOULD GET MY
FRIEND BAGS OF CLOTHING, AND HIS
OLD STUFF, AND I HAD SOME OF
THOSE THINGS, BUT I LISTENED TO
HIM. YOU KNOW WHAT, HE IS ALWAYS
RIGHT BECAUSE HE IS HIM.
I FIGURED OUT HOW TO GET A
MEANINGFUL EDUCATION IN MY
BROKEN PUBLIC SCHOOLS.
I DID NOT GO TO THE BEST
SCHOOLS, BUT YOU KNOW, I HAVE
LOVE FOR THEM AND THE TEACHERS
WHO WOULD WORK WITH THE STUDENTS
WHO WANTED TO WORK WITH THEM,
AND THIS IS HOW I GOT THROUGH
IT. I WOULD GO TO SCHOOL AND IF
THERE IS A CLASS WHERE THERE IS
60 STUDENTS IN THEIR OR 45-50
STUDENTS IN THERE, AND THEY
JOKING OR PLAYING DICE, I WOULD
GO AND TALK TO THE TEACHER WHO
HAD THE LITTLE MICHIGAN STATE
POSTER ON THE WALL OR THE
TEACHER WHO HAD PICTURES OF
THEIR COLLEGE COLLAGES AND I
WOULD ASK HOW DID YOU GET THERE,
HOW DID YOU DO THAT?
TELL ME WHAT I HAVE TO THE TO
GET THERE, AND THEY WOULD TELL
ME -- THE BEST IS I HAD A MATH
TEACHER, AND THIS GUY HAD A
BREAKDOWN ONE DAY BECAUSE
EVERYONE WAS IN HIS CLASS
PLAYING, AND HE WAS THIS OLD,
WHITE DUDE AND YOU LOOK LIKE
THE GUY ON THE CARE SEE BOX,
BALD UP TOP.
HE SAID, "THESE RICH KIDS IN THE
COUNTY PAY ME BIG DOLLARS TO
TEACH, YOU KNOW, THE STUFF YOU
CAN JUST GET THROUGH DON'T YOU
WANT TO GO TO COLLEGE?"
HE TURNED ALREADY AND HE RAN OUT
OF THE ROOM AND I'M LIKE, "DA
MN, HE ALMOST LOST A BOOKING
STOCK."
I CAUGHT HIM WHEN HE WAS COMING
BACK IN THE CLASSROOM AND I
SAID, "HOW MUCH THOSE KIDS PAY
YOU?" HE'S LIKE WHAT YOU TALKING
ABOUT?
AND I SAID, KIDS PAY YOU FOR SAT
TEACHING?
HE SAID, IF YOU COME, I WILL DO
IT FOR FREE.
NO, I WANT TO PAY THE FEE.
IF YOU GIVE IT TO ME, I'M NOT
GOING TO APPRECIATE IT.
HOW MUCH DOES IT COST?
HE GAVE ME THE PRICE. I DID OK.
I WAS NOT DOUGIE HOUSER.
I WAS NOT THE SMARTEST KID IN
THE WORLD, BUT I ALSO, YOU KNOW,
SCHOOL.
IF YOU GIVE ME DIRECTIONS, I
WILL WRITE IT DOWN, LOOK AT IT
TWICE, MEMORIZE IT, TAKE A TEST.
EITHER MATH, LOGIC, FIGURE OUT
WHAT TO DO WHEN I SEE CERTAIN
EQUATIONS, WHATEVER.
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT BUT A LOT
OF TIMES, I THINK WE QUIT OR GET
FRUSTRATED OVER THE MOST
PEDESTRIAN THINGS.
LIKE, IT IS NOT THAT DIFFICULT.
ALL OF YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO
GRADUATE AND DO GREAT IN MY.
I BELIEVE IN YOU.
SO, UM, MY BROTHER USED ALWAYS
SAY, WHATEVER YOU GO TO COLLEGE
FOR, JUST MAKE SURE YOU ARE
TAKING COMPUTERS.
HE'S TELLING ME THIS.
I'M A TEENAGER IN THE LATE
1990'S AND HE'S TELLING ME THAT
IF I GO TO COLLEGE FOR COMPUTERS
BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO BE
USING COMPUTERS FOREVER, AND
AGAIN, I DID NOT BELIEVE HIM.
THIS IS AROUND THE TIME A
DESKTOP WAS $50,000.
EVERYBODY IS GOING TO HAVE ONE
OF THESE?
WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT?
I HAVE A SEGA GENESIS.
I DON'T HAVE A COMPUTER.
HE SAID, LOOK, ONE DAY EVERYONE
IS GOING TO HAVE ONE.
OK, SO THAT WAS GOING TO BE MY
FOCUS, AND I APPLIED TO A LOT OF
DIFFERENT SCHOOLS AND FIGURED I
WOULD GET INTO ONE.
I GOT INTO A COUPLE.
YOU KNOW, SAT SCORES WERE PRETTY
SOLID, ESPECIALLY COMING FROM MY
AREA, SO I'M SET, OFF TO
COLLEGE, AND THIS IS FOR MY
WHITE PEOPLE IN THE AUDIENCE.
WHEN YOU ARE BLACK PERSON FROM
MY NEIGHBORHOOD AND GOING TO
COLLEGE, IT IS A BIG DEAL.
THERE IS PARTIES, FESTIVITIES,
CELEBRATIONS.
FROM A FAMILY, IT WAS LIKE,
"HE'S GOING TO COLLEGE."
SO HE'S GOING TO COLLEGE AND IT
WAS A BIG THING AND AS I AM
COLLECTING LETTERS, I GOT
LETTERS FROM A COUPLE OF
DIFFERENT SCHOOLS.
I'M GETTING READY TO HIT MY
BROTHER WITH THIS PACKAGE OF
MAIL, AND I'M CELEBRATING WITH
MY MOM AND MY AUNT AND THEN I
GOT A KNOCK ON THE DOOR.
I OPENED THE DOOR, AND IT IS A
CRAZY DUDE FROM THE NEIGHBORHOOD
NAME RON.
NOBODY REALLY LISTENS TO HIM.
HE ALWAYS HAS A STORY THAT DOES
NOT ADD UP.
HIS STORIES -- HIS STORIES NEVER
ADD UP, NEVER AT UP.
HE GOES TO THE STORE, YOU GIVE
HIM $100 TO GO TO THE STORE AND
HE BRINGS BACK A RECEIPT THAT
SAYS THERE IS A MUST BE $80 AND
CHANGE. HE HAS LIKE $50.
IT NEVER ADDS UP.
HE SAYS, "YO" -- I WILL NEVER
FORGET THE LOOK ON HIS FACE
BECAUSE IT WAS HEAVY.
I NEVER SAW HIS EYES SO FOCUSED
AND WALKED IN BECAUSE HE WAS A
DRAINING KIND OF GUY.
HE'S LIKE -- DREAMING KIND OF
GUY. I SAID, MAN, YOU CRAZY.
I TOLD MY MOM AND MY AUNT LIKE
HE SAID SOMETHING HAPPENED, LIKE
HE IS CRAZY.
THAT IS NOT A REAL THING.
THAT IS NOT A REAL THING.
SO MY AUNT IS LIKE, WHAT YOU
STAY IN THE HOUSE?
LET ME GO OUTSIDE AND SEE WHAT
IS GOING ON SO I CAN GET TO THE
BOTTOM OF THIS.
SO I WENT OUTSIDE AND I'M
WALKING THROUGH THE LOBBY AND I
GET OUT FRONT AND I SEE A GROUP
OF PEOPLE STARTING TO GATHER AND
EVERYBODY IS LOOKING AT ME LIKE
I WALKED IN CLASS LATE.
THEY WERE JUST LOOKING LIKE --
AND PEOPLE STARTED SAYING, YOU
OK, YOU GOOD?
LIKE, WHAT'S UP WITH YOU?
AND I'M LIKE, YOU ALL CRAZY, GET
OFF OF ME.
PEOPLE STARTED PULLING ME AND
THEY WERE CRYING AND IT WAS WILD
.
AND THEN I SAW HIM RIGHT THERE,
LAID OUT.
HE WAS STARING AT SOMETHING
BEYOND ME.
HE WAS LOOKING INTO HEAVEN.
HE WAS GONE.
HE WAS RIGHT THERE, DEAD.
EVERYTHING JUST DROPPED FOR ME.
I WAS NOT REALLY THINKING ABOUT
COLLEGE I WAS NOT THINKING ABOUT
ANYTHING.
THIS IS THE PERSON WHO, YOU
KNOW, WHO WANTED ME TO READ SO
BAD THAT HE BEAT ME UP OVER
READING A BOOK.
I READ THE NARRATIVE OF
FREDERICK DOUGLASS IN HIGH
SCHOOL BECAUSE, AGAIN, HE WANTED
ME TO BE GOOD AT SCHOOL, AND
THIS IS A PERSON WHO GAVE ME ALL
OF THE SKILLS THAT I NEEDED TO
BE SUCCESSFUL, AND NOW HE IS
GONE, AND I AM JUST STUCK,
SITTING HERE LOOKING CRAZY, AND
I DID NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.
SO I DID NOT GO TO COLLEGE.
YOU KNOW, I STAYED HOME.
A LOT OF MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY,
THEY WERE COMING OUT, AND THEY
WERE LIKE YOU SHOULD GO.
YOU SHOULD STILL GO TO COLLEGE.
ALL THESE PEOPLE, WE WANT YOU TO
WIN, DO GOOD, SO YOU SHOULD TRY
TO FIGURE THIS OUT AND GO TO
SCHOOL.
I SAID, YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GOING
TO GO TO SCHOOL.
SO I WENT TO THIS SCHOOL.
I WANTED TO BE CLOSE TO MY
FAMILY, BUT I WENT TO THE SCHOOL
LOYOLA, AND IT WAS INTERESTING
BECAUSE WHERE I'M FROM IN EAST
BALTIMORE, THE NEIGHBORHOOD IS
LIKE 750% BLACK.
EVEN WHITE PEOPLE ARE BLACK.
WHITE PEOPLE NAMED TEYVON.
SUCH A BLACK NEIGHBORHOOD AND
THE ONLY WHAT PEOPLE COMING UP
WERE HOUSING POLICE AND SOCIAL
WORKERS LIKE MICHELLE PFEIFFER
ON DANGEROUS MINDS.
I NEVER REALLY MET -- I NEVER
MET LIKE A YOUNG WHITE PERSON
WHO WAS 18 YEARS OLD.
WANT TO GO TO THE BASKETBALL
COURT?
I DID NOT KNOW THOSE GUYS, SO
COME YOU KNOW, I GO TO THIS
COLLEGE WHICH IS LIKE THE
WHITEST SCHOOL IN AMERICA, AND
IT'S AL -- I SAW ALL OF THE
THINGS I HAD NEVER SEEN BEFORE.
PATTY SACHS, ACOUSTIC GUITARS.
I'M HEARING KIDS TALK ABOUT THE
GRASSY -- DEGRASSI.
I'M NOT EVEN TRYING TO BE FUNNY.
I NEVER HEARD OF THESE THINGS.
SO I THINK THAT WITH THE WAY I
THINK AND NAVIGATE, I COULD HAVE
FIGURED OUT MY OWN WAY TO
UNDERSTAND THE CULTURE OF THE
SCHOOL, BUT AT THE TIME, I WAS
SO MESSED UP THAT MY BROTHER WAS
GONE THAT I WAS JUST LIKE, YOU
KNOW, I HAD A WALL BUILT UP ON
EVERY SIDE, AND NOBODY WAS GOING
TO PENETRATE.
YOU KNOW, I WAS SO, LIKE, SO
UPSET AND FRUSTRATED AND
DEPRESSED THAT I COULD NOT EVEN
THINK PAST THAT, SO I SAID, YOU
KNOW, I'M GOING TO HANG IN HERE
AND GIVE SCHOOL SHOT.
I GOT A FRIEND AND HE DROPPED
OUT OF IS GREAT.
HE WAS A FUNNY GUY GOOD I MISS
HIM.
HE WAS ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS.
HE WAS THERE FOR ME A LOT WHEN
MY BROTHER DIED.
HE EVENTUALLY GOT MURDERED, TOO.
BUT AT THE TIME, I CALLED HIM
UP, AND I'M LIKE I NEED HELP,
BRO.
I SAID, I NEEDED TO HANG OUT
WITH ME AT MY SCHOOL.
-- I NEED YOU TO HANG OUT WITH
ME AT MY SCHOOL.
I SAID THIS SCHOOL IS REALLY
WEIRD, I DON'T REALLY UNDERSTAND
IT. I DOES NEED TO BE AROUND
SOMEBODY I KNOW, AND YOU KNOW,
GET THE BALL ROLLING AND
EVERYTHING. HE SAID, OK, COOL.
YOU GOT A PROBLEM, YOU ARE A
PROBLEM WITH THE PRINCIPAL, I
WILL PUNCH THEM IN HIS MOUTH.
I SAID IT IS NOT THE PRINCIPAL,
IT IS THE DEAN.
I DO NOT KNOW HIM, SO IT IS ALL
GOOD.
HE SAID OK, COOL, I'M COMING UP.
HE HUNG AROUND CAMPUS AND WE
AGREED, MAN.
THIS IS NOT WHERE IT IS AT.
SO I DROPPED OUT OF SCHOOL AND I
STARTED HANGING OUT IN THE
NEIGHBORHOOD A LOT AND AT THAT
TIME, I FELT LIKE THE BEST PLACE
AND THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE WAS
IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD, SO I
STARTED SELLING DRUGS.
I JUMPED IN HERE FIRST AND I DID
NOT JUMP IN -- I DID NOT JUMP IN
LIKE -- I JUMPED IN WITH THE
INTENT TO WIN.
I WANTED TO MAKE A BIG SPLASH,
SO I DID THAT, AND IT JUST WAS
NOT ME. IT DID NOT WORK.
THE DEEPER I GOT INTO IT, THE
MORE I REALIZED THAT, I THINK
PART OF IT, TOO, WAS I MADE ALL
THESE FRIENDS AND SINCE I LOST
MY BROTHER, I WAS IN SEARCH OF
FAMILY, PEOPLE TO CONNECT WITH.
WHEN THE MONEY WAS GREAT,
EVERYBODY WAS MY FAMILY.
WHEN THE MONEY WAS FLUCTUATING,
GOING UP AND DOWN, THESE FAMILY
MEMBERS WOULD BE LIKE WHERE IS
EVERYBODY?
IT'S LIKE 20 FIND AN ENRON
EMPLOYEE -- TRYING TO FIND AN
ENRON EMPLOYEE.
I REALIZED I DID NOT WANT TO DO
IT ANYMORE.
PEOPLE ASKS, HOW DID YOU STOP,
WEREN'T YOU INTO DEEP?
97% OF THE BLACK PEOPLE WERE
BORN IN PARTICULAR WHEN A DRUG
DEALER WALKS AWAY, THERE IS 100
PEOPLE WHO WANT THAT JOB.
IT DOES NOT TAKE A LOT OF PEOPLE
TO FILL THE POSITION.
IT IS A CITY LIKE -- THIS IS NOT
ME -- 40 YEARS OF RESEARCH ON,
LIKE, 800 DIFFERENT POOR WHITE
AND BLACK FAMILIES.
HE BASICALLY FOUND THAT A BLACK
PERSON WITH SOME COLLEGE WHO HAD
NEVER BEEN IN JAIL HAS LESS OF A
CHANCE OF GETTING A JOB IN
BALTIMORE THAN A WHITE PERSON
WITH FELONIES.
IT IS LIKE SELLING HEROIN IS THE
ONLY PLACE THAT IS ALWAYS
HIRING.
SO I DID NOT WANT TO DO IT
ANYMORE.
I'M NOT THE SHARPEST GUY IN THE
WORLD, BUT I SAVED MONEY AND
BOUGHT A LIQUOR STORE.
I HAD A SIMILAR EXPERIENCE WITH
THE LIQUOR STORE.
IT IS LIKE THE SAME THING BUT
LEGAL.
I WOULD SEE THE SAME PEOPLE, AND
MAN, YOU KNOW, SOME PEOPLE, IT
IS LIKE ALCOHOL IS THE BEST
THERAPIST FOR SOME PEOPLE, BUT
NOT REALLY, BECAUSE AS SOON AS
YOU SOBER UP, THE PROBLEMS COME
BACK, SO I BOUGHT THIS LIQUOR
STORE BEFORE I DECIDED.
THE STADIUM WAS LIKE, WE USED TO
CALL IT AN OLD BAR BECAUSE A LOT
OF PEOPLE USED TO COME IN THERE
AND THEY WOULD LIKE, THEY WOULD
DRINK AND HIT THE JUKEBOX AND
PLAY, LIKE, YOU KNOW, THOSE
OLDER SONGS LIKE "YOU MAKE ME
HAPPY," ALL THAT STUFF.
I DON'T KNOW THAT SONG, EITHER.
I KNOW IT A LITTLE BIT, BUT
EVERYBODY, THEY WOULD PLAY THESE
SONGS AND I DID NOT MAKE ANY
MONEY, SO THIS GUY CAME IN THE
STORE AND TALKED TO ME ABOUT --
TALKED ME ABOUT POKER MACHINES.
HE TOLD ME THAT IF I PUT THESE
POKER MACHINES IN THE STORE, IT
WAS GOOD TO CHANGE MY LIFE.
UP AT THE POKER MACHINES IN THE
STORE AND I FELT LIKE I COULD BE
RICH IN ONE YEAR.
I MEAN, PEOPLE PLAYED THOSE
MACHINES.
I DON'T KNOW IF YOU GUYS HAVE
EVER BEEN TO THE INNER-CITY AND
SEEN THE DUSTY LITTLE MACHINES
IN THE STORES.
AS A KID, I DID NOT KNOW WHY
PEOPLE PLAYED THEM.
I THOUGHT PEOPLE LIKED TO THROW
MONEY AWAY.
I DID NOT KNOW THE GUY BEHIND
THE COUNTER WAS PAYING OUT.
LONG STORY SHORT, LONG STORY
SHORT, YOU KNOW, THE WOMAN WHO
WAS WORKING BEHIND THE BAR COPY
ONE NIGHT AND SAID SHE NEEDED
$3000 AND I WOULD LIKE THIS IS
MY FIRST WEEK.
I SAID, THAT IS CRAZY.
I DON'T EVEN HAVE $3000 ON ME.
SHE SAID, THEY ARE NOT LEAVING
UNTIL YOU BRING THE MONEY.
I SAID, MAN.
I GOT THE MONEY TOGETHER AND I
PAID THEM AND I CALLED THE
MACHINE GUY.
COME GET THESE MACHINES.
I THINK THEY BROKE.
HE COMES TO THE STORE AND OPENS
THE MACHINE AND IT IS LIKE
$16,000 IN THERE.
I MIGHT, THIS IS LIKE --
I'M THINKING, THE CAPITALIST AND
ME IS LIKE, THIS IS LIKE, I'M
LIKE, WARNED BUFFETT -- WARREN
BUFFETT'S COUSIN.
WHEN I STARTED SPENDING TIME IN
A STORE, I SAW HOW DISRUPTIVE
THEY WERE, AND ONE NIGHT, I WAS
PUTTING SOME STOCK AWAY, AND
THERE WAS A WOMAN PLAYING THE
MACHINE AND SHE WAS PLAYING A
MACHINE AND SHE HAD LIKE A
HOUSEKEEPING UNIFORM, LIKE SHE
WORKED IN A HOSPITAL OR
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, AND WHEN I
LOOKED AT HER, SHE LOOKS LIKE
SHE WAS ABOUT TO CRY.
WHAT'S WRONG?
AND SHE SAID, UM, "I WORKED 80
SOME HOURS AND I PUT MY WHOLE
$800 IN THIS MACHINE.
THIS MACHINE THE BAD TONIGHT."
AND I SAID, WHAT?
MAN, THAT IS CRAZY.
I WENT TO THE BACK OF THE STORE
AND I HAD A LITTLE STASH, LIKE
THE HUNDRED $50, 400 DOLLARS,
AND I GAVE IT TO HER.
I SAID, LOOK, TAKE THIS AND PAY
ME BACK WHENEVER YOU GET IT.
DON'T EVEN MATTER.
SHE SAID, THANK YOU, BABY.
PEOPLE SAY THAT YOUNG PEOPLE.
I GO BACK AND I FINISH PUTTING
STOCK IN THE MACHINE, COME BACK
OUT, AND SHE PUT MORE IN THE
MACHINE.
I SAID, I CANNOT DO THIS NO
MORE.
THAT IS WHEN I WENT TO SCHOOL.
JUST THE CONDENSED VERSION, I
DISCOVERED WRITING AND
STORYTELLING, AND I READ SO MUCH
THAT I REALIZED I WORKED
OVERTIME.
WHEN I FOUND OUT THERE WAS A
WRITER PUTTING IN SIX HOURS A
WEEK, I PUT IN 600.
I FOUND OUT SOMEBODY WAS READING
X AMOUNT OF BOOKS A WEEK, I HAD
TO WORK UP TO ALL THE TIME I
LOST.
THAT IS MY STORY AND A SHELL.
THANK YOU. -- IN A NUTSHELL.
THANK YOU.
SORRY, I TEND TO BLABBER, BUT WE
CAN OPEN IT UP TO QUESTIONS IF
YOU GUYS WANT TO TALK ABOUT
ANYTHING I DO NOW WITH LITERACY
PROGRAMS OR BASICALLY WHATEVER
YOU GUYS WANT TO TALK ABOUT.
I HAVE SOME INSIGHT.
I KNOW HOW TO NAVIGATE THIS
WORLD A LITTLE BIT.
>> [INDISCERNIBLE]
D. WATKINS: COOL, OK.
GIVE A CLAP FOR THE BRAVE SOUL.
[APPLAUSE]
D. WATKINS: THE FIRST QUESTION
IS ALWAYS THE TOUGHEST ONE.
THANK YOU.
>> [INDISCERNIBLE]
>> WHAT KIND -- CAN YOU EXPLAIN
ABOUT SOME OF THE PROGRAM THAT
YOU ARE INVOLVED IN, THAT YOU
KNOW ARE BENEFITING KIDS IN
BALTIMORE AND ALL OVER THE
STATES?
D. WATKINS: THANK YOU, YES, SO
IN BALTIMORE, I STARTED TO BE --
I STARTED THE BE MORE WRITERS
PROJECT, SO THESE YOUNG PEOPLE
ARE CONTROLLING THE NARRATIVE.
INSTEAD OF REPORTERS COMING INTO
THEIR NEIGHBORHOODS AND TELLING
THE BITS AND PIECES OF THE
STORIES THEY CAN ONLY TELL FROM
SPENDING FIVE SECONDS IN THE
PLACE, YOU HAVE PEOPLE WRITING
THESE STORIES AND GETTING PAID
TO PUBLISH THEM.
THAT HAS GOTTEN OFF TO A SLOW
START.
I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT THAT ONE
BECAUSE IT IS IMPORTANT.
I DID NOT KNOW A COLLEGE
PROFESSOR, I DID NOT KNOW A
PERSON WHO WORKED IN TELEVISION,
AND I HAVE DONE ALL OF THESE
THINGS NOW, SO I'M ACCESSIBLE.
I REALLY FELT LIKE IT WAS MY
RESPONSIBILITY TO SHARE THESE
SKILLS WITH YOUNG PEOPLE AND IT
GIVES THEM SOMETHING ELSE TO
LOOK FORWARD TO.
I PARTNER WITH PLACES IN BC AND
BOTH MORE WRITERS IN SCHOOL THEN
WE DONATED THOUSANDS OF COPIES
OF BOOKS.
THE SCHOOLS ALL OVER THE
BALTIMORE, D C AREA.
IF YOU HELP ME RAISE MONEY TO
DONATE THESE BOOKS, I WILL GO
INTO THE SCHOOLS AND TEACH
WORKSHOPS FOR FREE.
SOME OF THE PICTURES, THANK YOU.
IT'S A LOT OF WORK.
SOME OF THESE I GET GOING TO THE
SCHOOLS AND I GET TO TEACH
WORKSHOPS FOR FREE, AND IT IS
FUN.
BROWSE A KID, I THOUGHT I HATED
READING.
IF I'M LIVING DOWN THE HILL, I'M
SEEING ALL OF THIS CRAZY AND
AMAZING STUFF AND THEY GO TO
SCHOOL AND THE ONLY BOOK YOU
HAVE FOR ME IS HUCKLEBERRY FINN.
NOTICE THAT TO MARK TWAIN OR
ANYBODY.
THAT BOOK MAY HAVE WORKED 50
YEARS AGO, BUT OFFERED MY
GENERATION.
MARK TWAIN DID NOT HAVE
GIRLFRIENDS OR YOU KNOW.
THAT WAS NOT A JOURNEY THAT
RESONATED WITH ME OR ANY OF THE
YOUNG PEOPLE FROM MY
NEIGHBORHOOD.
A LOT OF THE PICTURES OF BLACK
PEOPLE IN THOSE BOOKS WERE
SLAVES.
WE ARE LIVING IN THE AIR OF
BEING FLASHY AND BODY AND
SHOWING OFF THE THINK YOU HAVE.
I DON'T THINK THE ONLY TUNE OF
THE PERSON THAT LOOKS LIKE ME IS
JUST A SLAVE WHO ONLY KNOWS, YOU
KNOW, WHO IS MONOSYLLABIC, ONE
SYLLABLE WORDS.
YOU KNOW, IT DID NOT SPEAK TO
ME. IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO GIVE
YOUNG PEOPLE BOOKS.
YOU WANT TO SEE BITS AND PIECES
OF YOURSELF IN A STORY, AS IF
YOU DO NOT, IT IS LIKE YOU'RE
BEING TAKEN OUT OF THE GAME
BEFORE YOU GET A CHANCE TO PLAY.
YOU HAVE GOT LITTLE GIRLS
READING BOOKS.
WHEN YOU SEE SOMETHING IN PRINT,
IT BECOMES A DEFINITIVE RULE,
UNIVERSALLY ACCEPTED.
WHATEVER THAT DEFINITION OF
BEAUTY IS, YOU HAVE TO OWN THAT.
WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF
INTELLIGENCE IS, IT IS IN THE
BOOK.
YOU HAVE TO FEEL LIKE YOU HATE
READING, TOO, WHEN READING IS AS
IMPORTANT AS WATER.
WHEN YOU ARE NOT READING AND
GROWING AND DEVELOPING THE
COMPLEX THOUGHTS, YOU LITTLE
LIFE BASED ON SOMEONE ELSE'S
THOUGHTS AND WILL NOT BE ABLE TO
ACHIEVE THE THINGS WE CAN
ACTUALLY ACHIEVE. SO THAT IS --
[APPLAUSE]
>> I HAVE ANOTHER QUESTION FOR
YOU. D. WATKINS: OK, COOL.
>> WHEN WAS THE FIRST TIME YOU
REALIZE YOU WERE BLACK?
THERE WAS A PODCAST RECENTLY
ABOUT IT, SO I WANTED TO HEAR
YOUR TAKE ON IT.
D. WATKINS: THE FIRST TIME I
REALIZED I WAS BLACK, I THINK I
WAS PLAYING LITTLE LEAGUE
BASEBALL.
LITTLE LEAGUE BASEBALL WAS MY
ONLY EXPERIENCE WITH WHITE
PEOPLE AS A YOUNG PERSON.
MY NEIGHBORHOOD HAD NO WHITE
PEOPLE, BUT YOU KNOW, THERE WAS
THIS GUY AND HE CAME AND GOT A
BUNCH OF KIDS FROM THE
NEIGHBORHOOD BECAUSE HIS TEAM
WAS NOT DOING THAT WELL IN
PATTERSON PARK, SO YOU KNOW, HE
IS LIKE, WE NEED A BLACK
ATHLETE.
WE NEED SOMEBODY TO RUN THEM
BASES.
I WAS LIKE, YOU KNOW, I CAN TRY
BASEBALL OUT.
MY COUSIN WAS GOOD. I SUCKED.
HE THREW ME OUT.
IT FELT LIKE THE END OF THE
GAME, CHARITY WORK, LIKE ALL
THAT.
WHEN I GOT OUT THERE, WE STARTED
HAVING ALTERCATIONS ON THE FIRST
DAY.
YOU KNOW, I WOULD COME OUT THERE
AND I'M A LITTLE KID, I WOULD
COME OUT READY TO PLAY BALL, AND
YOU KNOW, WE GOT DIRTY LOOKS AND
SOME PEOPLE, THEY SAID SOME
WORDS TO US, AND IT WAS NOT LIKE
A GOOD SITUATION.
THAT IS THE FIRST TIME I
REALIZED I WAS BLACK.
IT DID NOT HAVE LIKE A BIG
IMPACT ON ME BECAUSE -- ANYBODY
HERE FROM BALTIMORE?
WHEN YOU ARE IN BALTIMORE, YOU
DON'T LEAVE YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD
REALLY.
I KNOW PEOPLE WHO NEVER LEFT THE
PROJECT UNTIL THEY TORE THEM
DOWN, AND THEN WHEN THEY TORE
THEM DOWN, THEY GRABBED A BRICK
FOR A SOUVENIR.
I'M NOT EVEN JOKING.
MY GRANDMOTHER GRABBED A BRICK
TO KEEP FOREVER, YOU KNOW WHAT
I'M SAYING? SO PEOPLE DON'T EVEN
NEIGHBORHOOD, SO I DID NOT GET
THE NEXT BIG SHOT UNTIL WHATEVER
TIMES I THEN RAN THROUGH THE
SYSTEM AND WHEN I GOT TO LOYOLA,
LOYOLA WAS THE BIG THING FOR ME.
LOYOLA WAS LIKE THERE IS A WHOLE
OTHER BALTIMORE YOU WERE NEVER
SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT AND THEY
EAT A LOT OF MAYONNAISE.
[LAUGHTER]
D. WATKINS: MANAGE DISPENSERS.
CRAZY. IT WAS OUT OF CONTROL.
-- MAYONNAISE DISPENSERS. CRAZY.
IT WAS OUT OF CONTROL.
[LAUGHTER]
>> I KNOW YOU COMMENTED ABOUT
HOW YOU ARE SUPPOSEDLY DONE WITH
PROTESTS OR IN THE WAY OF
ADVANCING CIVIL RIGHTS, YOU WANT
TO PUT YOURSELF IN A PLACE WHERE
YOU ARE MORE POWERFUL.
GROWING UP IN THIS COUNTY, I
FEEL LIKE THE FOCUS ON CIVIL
RIGHTS AND THE FOCUS ON I WOULD
SAY THE COVERAGE OF THE CIVIL
RIGHTS MOVEMENT WAS MORE FOCUSED
ON MARTIN LUTHER KING, THE WAY I
LEARNED IT IN MY YOUTH, AND AS I
GREW UP, I LEARNED MORE ABOUT I
GUESS, I COULD SAY, LESS
SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE TRAINS OF
THOUGHT.
WE DO NOT COVER AS MUCH OF THE
VIEWPOINTS LIKE MALCOLM X., "BY
ANY MEANS NECESSARY," THAT SORT
OF THING.
WOULD YOU ARTICULATE AN OPINION
FOR ME OF, IF ONE HAD TO GO OUT
THERE AND PROTEST, LIKE IN THE
CONTEXT OF MODERN PROTESTS, LIKE
BLACK LIVES MATTER AND ALL THAT,
DO YOU THINK THERE IS A MORE
RIGHT OR WRONG WAY OF DOING IT,
AND HOW DO YOU FEEL THIS
COMPARES TO THE DIFFERENT CAMPS
WE HAD?
D. WATKINS: ONE THING I DO IS
LIKE, SO, I DO THINK THAT
PROTESTS CAN BE IMPORTANT, I
JUST DO NOT THINK IT IS
IMPORTANT FOR ME.
I DO NOT THINK THAT IS WHERE I
CAN BE MOST POWERFUL.
SOME PEOPLE FEEL MORE POWERFUL
WHEN THEY ARE MARCHING IN THE
STREET AND THAT IS A BIT OF A
THING, BUT I THINK THAT, YOU
KNOW, FOR ME, I FELT LIKE I DO A
LOT OF WORK AROUND BOOKS AND
LITERACY AND TEACHING PEOPLE HOW
TO READ, AND YOU KNOW, TRYING TO
GET GOOD BOOKS TO SCHOOLS AND
NOT JUST MY BOOKS, BUT OTHER
BOOKS, TOO. THAT IS MY THING.
I KNOW OTHER PEOPLE WHO WORK
WITH FINANCIAL LITERACY, HOW TO
TAKE A DOLLAR AND MAKE IT.
I KNOW OTHER PEOPLE WHO DO THE
SAME THING WITH NUTRITION.
LIKE, THE PEOPLE WHO TAUGHT ME
ABOUT ALMOND MILK.
I WAS JOKING EARLIER, LIKE, YOU
KNOW, I DID NOT EVEN KNOW ALMOND
HAD NIPPLES, LIKE THIS IS CRAZY.
ALL OF THESE PEOPLE ARE
IMPORTANT.
IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE THE WORLD,
IT IS NEVER ABOUT ONE PERSON,
ONE PERSON CONTROLLING THE
NARRATIVE AND SPEAKING FOR
EVERYBODY.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A VOICE FOR
THE VOICELESS, JUST PAST THE MIC
-- PASS THE MIC.
I DON'T WANT TO GET IN FRONT OF
A STAGE AND GIVE MY IDEAS TO ONE
MILLION PEOPLE BECAUSE THAT IS
NOT THERE.
YOU KNOW, I CAN WORK WITH A
SMALL GROUP OF PEOPLE, I CAN
HELP THEM, YOU KNOW, -- IF
FREDDIE GRAY WAS ALIVE, HE COULD
WALK UP TO ME AND SAY LET ME
HOLD $20.
HE COULD COME UP TO ME AND SAY,
LOOK, HOW DO YOU FILL OUT THIS
RESUME, I'M TRY TO GET A JOB?
I'M POWERFUL IN THAT WAY.
I'M NOT POWERFUL -- IF I TALK TO
ONE MILLION MIDDLE-CLASS RICH
WHITE AND BLACK PEOPLE IN THE
BIG AUDIENCE AND I, AND GIVE
FIRE AND BRIMSTONE AND GIVE THIS
WILD SPEECH AND EVERYBODY IS
CRYING AND WOMEN ARE THINKING
AND KIDS ARE COMING YOU KNOW,
YOU KNOW, AND EVERYBODY GOES
HOME, THEN ONE IS THE POINT?
-- WHAT IS THE POINT?
IF YOU WANT TO HELP AND MAKE A
DIFFERENCE, GET IN THE
COMMUNITY, FIGURE OUT WHAT
PEOPLE NEED, FIGURE OUT WHAT THE
VOID IS, AND WORK THERE.
I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO ARE
LIKE CELEBRITY TYPE PROTESTERS.
THAT IS A REAL THING.
CELEBRITY TYPE PROTESTERS OR
CELEBRITY ACTIVISTS AND ALL
THAT, BUT THEY DO NOT EVEN KNOW
ANY PEOPLE.
AND YOU GOT ALL THEM LANGUAGE IN
THE WORLD ABOUT WHAT NEEDS TO BE
DONE THIS COUNTRY BUT YOU DON'T
EVEN KNOW THE PEOPLE YOU ARE
SPEAKING FOR.
AND THE PEOPLE WHO YOU ARE
SPEAKING FOR NEVER HEARD OF YOU.
YOU JUST POPPING ON THE
INTERNET, MSNBC, BUT YOU DON'T
KNOW ANYBODY.
YOU DON'T KNOW ANYBODY.
I WAS TALKING TO THIS GUY ON CNN
AND WAS LIKE, "YOU SOUND STUPID,
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, WHO
HIRED YOU, HOW DID YOU MAKE IT
TO TELEVISION?"
I REALLY HAD TO GO OFF ON THIS
GUY, SLICE THE INTERVIEW UP.
IT WAS LIVE, THEY CUT IT, AND I
HAVE NEVER BEEN BACK.
YOU KNOW, BUT AT THE END OF THE
DAY, YOU KNOW, AT THE END OF THE
DAY, LIKE, COME ON, LIKE YOU
KNOW, LIKE THERE'S PEOPLE OUT
THERE -- OK SO I DID THIS IN THE
MIDWEST SOMEWHERE, THIS LADY
CAME TO THE MICROPHONE AND SHE
SEEMED LIKE A NICE LADY, BUT SHE
IS LIKE, YOU KNOW, LIKE "YOU
KNOW, I'M JUST A WHITE WOMAN
FROM SEATTLE WITH A BIG HEART."
AND I SAID, OK, COOL.
THAT'S GOOD.
SHE SAID, "I CARE ABOUT THESE
ISSUES AND I WANT TO HELP."
AND I'M LISTENING TO HER AND I
THINK SHE WAS SINCERE.
SHE SAID, "WELL, YOU KNOW, I
DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN DO, BUT I
TOOK PICTURES OF FERGUSON AND
PUBLISHED THEM AND I TOOK
PICTURES OF THE BALTIMORE
UPRISING AND PUBLISHED THEM, AND
I DON'T KNOW HOW I CAN HELP."
I SAID, MAYBE INSTEAD OF TAKING
PICTURES OF PEOPLE IN PAIN, YOU
CAN PULL SOME OF THEM ASIDE AND
TEACH THEM, YOU KNOW, HOW TO
WORK ONE OF THEM $5,000 CAMERAS
AND TELL THEM THAT, YOU KNOW,
YOU CAN BE A PHOTOGRAPHER.
THIS CAN BE A PROFESSION FOR
YOU.
YOU KNOW, SHOW THEM SOMETHING
DIFFERENT.
IT DOES NOT TAKE MONEY, JUST A
LITTLE BIT OF TIME, A LITTLE BIT
EXPOSURE GOES A LONG WAY.
THAT DOES NOT MAKE HER A
REVOLUTIONARY ADVOCATE THAT
MARCHED 30 MILES, BUT SHE IS
POWERFUL BECAUSE SHE SHOWED
THESE KIDS A REALITY THAT NEVER
CAME TO THEM.
SHE WAS ACCESSIBLE, SHE SHOWED
THEM THE SKILLS, AND NOW THESE
KIDS ARE GOING TO GROW UP AND
THEY COULD BE SHOOTING FOR ESPN
OR NEW YORK TIMES OR SOMETHING.
IT IS THAT SIMPLE.
I FIND MORE VALUE IN THAT.
THAT IS MY THING.
AGAIN, SOME OF MY BEST FRIENDS
LOVE TO PROTEST.
LIKE, THEY, YOU KNOW, ALL SHE
WAS HAVE HOLES IN THE BOTTOM.
THAT IS GOOD FOR THEM, IF THAT
IS WHAT THEY LIKE.
I FEEL LIKE IF YOU REALLY WANT
TO MAKE THIS COUNTRY A BETTER
PLACE, THERE IS SO MANY
DIFFERENT POSITIVE THINGS WE CAN
DO.
YOU CAN HAVE PEACEFUL PROTEST,
BUT YOU CAN ALSO HAVE, YOU KNOW,
SEMINARS THAT HELP PEOPLE FIND
EMPLOYMENT OR ENTREPRENEURSHIP,
OR WHAT TO DO WITH MONEY, OR HOW
TO ACTUALLY CREATE THIS WEALTH
AND HIRE SOME OF THE PEOPLE
LOCKED OUT OF THE SYSTEM.
THERE IS SO ME THINK YOU CAN DO
TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
PROTEST IS JUST ONE THING.
-- SO MANY THINGS YOU CAN DO TO
MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
PROTEST IS JUST ONE THING.
>> GOOD EVENING, SO MY QUESTION
IS, YOU HAD TO STOP AND START
WHEN IT CAME TO COLLEGE.
I WANTED TO KNOW WHAT YOU
MAJORED IN IN UNDERGRAD AND WHAT
TOOK YOU TOWARDS EDUCATION,
SPECIFICALLY?
D. WATKINS: SO, I WILL DO A
QUICK. UNDERGRAD, UM, I HAD ONE
CLASS THAT I SWITCHED MY MAJOR
FROM CRIMINAL JUSTICE -- I WAS
TAKING CRIMINAL JUSTICE -- I
SWITCHED MY MAJOR TO HISTORY.
[LAUGHTER]
D. WATKINS: I LOVED IT.
I LOVED IT, AND I WANTED TO GO
TO JOHNS HOPKINS BECAUSE IT WAS
RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER FROM MY
HOUSE.
THEY HAD A PROGRAM, LIKE A FIVE
YEAR PHD PROGRAM, AND IT PAID A
STIPEND.
THESE ARE ALL THE THINGS I NEED
TO GET MY LIFE TOGETHER.
SO I APPLIED TO THE PROGRAM AND
DID NOT GET IN, SO I WAS OUT OF
TOWN SOMEWHERE.
I GOT THE LETTER IN THE MAIL AND
MY LITTLE BROTHER CALLED ME AND
SAID YOU GOT A LETTER FROM
HOPKINS.
I SAID, I'M GOING TO GRAD
SCHOOL.
HE SAID THEY DID NOT LET YOU IN.
I SAID STOP LYING.
CLOSE THE LETTER.
I WILL DEAL WITH IT WHEN I GET
BACK.
I SAID, LOOK, LET'S FIGURE IT
OUT. SO I CALLED UP THE GUY.
AND I SAID, LOOK, MAN, I GOT A
LETTER IN THE MAIL AND I THINK
YOU GUYS ARE MAKING A HORRIBLE
MISTAKE.
AND HE SAID I REMEMBER YOUR
APPLICATION.
COME IN AND LET'S TALK ABOUT
THIS.
AND WE HAD A GREAT CONVERSATION.
HE SAID, IF YOU WANT TO PUT
THESE THINGS IN AN APPLICATION,
YOU WOULD HAVE DONE A BETTER
JOB.
YOUR ESSAY IN THE THINGS YOU
PRESENTED WERE HORRIBLE.
I SAID, MAN, I AM IN A REALLY
WEIRD PLACE IN MY LIFE.
IF I DON'T GO TO SCHOOL NEXT
SEMESTER, I DON'T KNOW WHERE I
WILL END UP.
BECAUSE I DIDN'T REALLY KNOW.
MY FRIENDS HAD JUST GOT
MURDERED.
I WAS KICKING BACK INTO THE SAME
CYCLE OF, YOU KNOW, TRYING NOT
TO GO CRAZY.
AND MY FRIEND WHO WAS MURDERED,
HE WAS TORTURED. IT WAS BAD.
HE HAD A CLOSED CASKET FUNERAL.
THEY BURN HIS EYES AND
EVERYTHING.
IT WAS A BAD SITUATION.
AND THE GUY SAID, LOOK, YOU GOT
PRETTY GOOD GRADES AND I THINK
YOU ARE A PRETTY SHORT KID.
WHEN YOU HANG AROUND CAMPUS AND
WE WILL TRY TO GET YOU TO THE
PROGRAM NEXT YEAR.
I NEED TO DO SOMETHING.
LET ME THINK ABOUT THAT.
HE SAID, I THINK IT YOU SOME
SCHOLARSHIPS TO GO THROUGH THE
JOHNS HOPKINS SCHOOL OF
EDUCATION.
I SAID, THAT'S CRAZY, I REALLY
WANT TO TEACH.
I TOOK A CLASS ON TEACHING
CHILDREN HOW TO WRITE MEMOIRS.
I LOVE THE CLASS SO MUCH, IT
BLEW MY MIND.
IT FELT LIKE MY MISSION.
MY MISSION IS TO DO SOMETHING
INVOLVED WITH STORYTELLING.
I'M ADDICTED BEFORE I EVEN, YOU
KNOW GOT STARTED.
I DOUBLED UP ON MY CLASSES AND I
FINISH THE TWO-YEAR PROGRAM IN A
YEAR.
WHEN I WAS IN SCHOOL AT HOPKINS,
I WAS ALSO IN AN MFA PROGRAM, TO
GRADUATE PROGRAMS OF THE SAME
TIME. THEY DON'T TALK.
[LAUGHTER]
I KNEW I WANTED TO BE A
PROFESSIONAL WRITER AND NO ONE
WANTED TO TEACH WRITING.
THIS IS WHAT I WANT TO DO.
I HAD A CLEAR FOCUS.
I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT
ANYTHING MONETARY AT ALL.
I WAS FLAT BROKE.
BUT I WAS SO INTO THE BOOKS I
WAS READING.
AND WHAT I WAS TAKING FROM THEM.
I FELT LIKE I WAS BEING FED.
THAT'S ONE OF THE BEST DECISIONS
I EVER MADE. [APPLAUSE]
>> I HAVE TWO QUESTIONS.
WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT FREDDIE GRAY
IN YOUR BOOK, CAN YOU EXPLAIN --
YOU SAID HE WAS KILLED BY THE
POLICE.
BUT CAN YOU EXPLAIN HOW FREDDIE
GRAY WAS ALREADY -- I SHOULDN'T
SAY DEAD, BUT HE WAS ALREADY
BROKEN, FROM A BROKEN SYSTEM,
FROM A BROKEN SCHOOL SYSTEM.
BLACK AND BROWN GO FROM
OVERCROWDED SCHOOLS TO
OVERCROWDED PRISONS.
THE NEW TALK ABOUT HOW FREDDIE
GRAY DIED FROM NOT REALIZING HIS
FULL POTENTIAL?
AND HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE
HORSESHOE CAN SAY NO, THOSE WHO
ARE SPENDING THEIR HARD, EARNED
MONEY IN THE CASINO FOR A HOPE
THAT THEY WILL NEVER GET?
WHICH IS RESPONSIBLE FOR ITS
CAPTION CONTENT AND ACCURACY.
VISIT NCICAP.ORG] --
D. WATKINS: THANK YOU FOR THAT.
HE KIND OF ANSWERED IT.
BUT THANK YOU FOR THAT.
THAT'S GREAT.
CAN WE GET A BOO FOR THE CASINO?
THE CASINO WAS SUPPOSED TO BRING
MONEY FOR SCHOOLS.
THEY WERE ABOUT TO LAY OFF A
THOUSAND TEACHERS AND CENTRAL
STAFF MEMBERS. A THOUSAND.
CLASSROOM SIZES WERE ABOUT TO
DOUBLE IN SCHOOLS WERE ABOUT THE
CLOSE.
SO STUDENTS WHO COULD NOT GET
INSPIRED IN 2017 WITH NO AC IS
ABOUT TO BE IN THE CLASSROOM --
I WAS NO AC IN 2017.
WHERE'S THE MONEY FROM THE
CASINO?
EVERY TIME I WALK THROUGH THE
HORSESHOE, THERE'S WALL-TO-WALL
PEOPLE IN THERE.
SO MY NEXT BIG THING IS WHAT ARE
YOU DOING WITH THE MONEY?
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MONEY FOR
SCHOOLS?
WHY IS IT WHEN YOU NEED THE
COMMUNITY FOR SOMETHING COME YOU
TELL THEM WHAT THEY WANT.
AND WHEN IT'S TIME TO DO YOUR
PART, THEY DISAPPEAR?
I THINK THE CASINO IS HORRIBLE.
I THINK THEY'RE HORRIBLE.
THEY BREED ADDICTION AND THEY
DON'T HELP.
AS FAR AS FREDDIE GRAY, I CAN'T
FRONT.
BEING YOUNG AND BLACK, A YOUNG
BLACK PERSON FROM BALTIMORE IS
TOUGH BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT JUST
FIGHTING AGAINST -- YOU'RE NOT
JUST FIGHTING AGAINST ONE
SYSTEM.
YOU ARE FIGHTING AGAINST SO MANY
SYSTEMS BECAUSE YOUR SCHOOL
PROBABLY IS UNDERFUNDED,
FAILING, DON'T HAVE THE
RESOURCES YOU NEED SO YOU CAN
COMPETE WITH A KID IN THE COUNTY
SCHOOL.
YOU COULD GET MURDERED IN YOUR
NEIGHBORHOOD.
YOU COULD GET MURDERED BY POLICE
OFFICERS.
SO THERE'S TO DO FOR PEOPLE THAT
CAN TAKE YOU OUT OF HERE AND OF
THEM ARE GOING TO GET PUNISHED
FOR THE CRIME.
THERE'S A LOT OF DEAD PEOPLE
WITH NO KILLERS WALKING AROUND
OUT THERE. IT'S TOUGH.
EVERYTHING AROUND HIS SAW.
IT TAKES A MONTH TO DRIVE TO GET
ONE APPLE AND YOU'VE GOT TO
SHARE IT.
YOU ARE DEALING WITH THAT
SITUATION, TOO.
AND THEN A CULTURE AND EDUCATION
THAT DOESN'T REALLY EXIST.
YOU GET PEOPLE WHO THINK HIM IF
YOU SEND KIDS TO SCHOOL, THEY
LEARNED THAT IS IT.
THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT
SCHOOLS ONLY GO FOR 15% TO 20%.
THE REST HAS TO HAPPEN AT HOME.
SO YOU GET ALL THESE DIFFERENT
THINGS GOING ON ON TOP OF THE
FACT THAT PEOPLE OUTSIDE THE
NEIGHBORHOOD ARE LOOKING AT YOU,
THINKING YOUR CRAZY.
THEY THINK YOU'RE CRAZY.
I HAD AN EVENT AND I COULDN'T
FIND THE ADDRESS.
I SHOULDN'T LAUGH AT THIS
BECAUSE IT'S NOT FUNNY.
THERE WAS A 30
SOMETHING-YEAR-OLD WHITE WOMAN
WALKING DOWN THE STREET AND
MAYBE I WASN'T DRESSED NICE -- I
WAS DRESSED NICE.
I LOOKED IN THE MIRROR TWICE
BEFORE I CAME OUTSIDE.
I THOUGHT IT WAS GOOD.
I SAID, EXCUSE ME, MISS, IS THIS
-- JUST LIKE THAT.
SHE LOOKED AT ME AND SHE TOOK
OFF RUNNING.
SHE STARTED RUNNING AND I WAS,
LIKE, WHERE SHE GOING AT?
I GUESS SHE LAPPED AROUND THE
BLOCK.
I FOUND THE ADDRESS ON MY OWN
AND I GO INSIDE.
FIVE MINUTES LATER, SHE WALKS
THROUGH THE DOOR AND SHE IS THE
PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR MAKING
SURE THAT I HAVE A CHARGER FOR
MY FOUND IN MY CODE IS HUNG UP.
AND SHE APOLOGIZED.
JUST UNDERSTAND, I DON'T WANT TO
ROB YOU OR KILL YOU.
I WANT TO SELL BOOKS ARE IN AND
THEN WE ARE DOING IT UPSTAIRS IN
THE NEXT FIVE MINUTES.
[LAUGHTER] SHAMELESS PLUG.
WE HAVE TIME FOR ONE MORE
QUESTION.
IT HAS TO BE THE BEST QUESTION
IN THE HISTORY OF QUESTIONS.
THERE'S A LOT OF PRESSURE ON
THIS LAST PERSON. FLIP THE?
-- FLIP THE QUESTION MARK
AROUND.
>> THAT'S A LOT OF PRESSURE.
D. WATKINS: I BELIEVE IN YOU.
>> WHEN IT COMES TO
EXTRACURRICULAR, WRITING THINGS,
DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT WORKING
WITH YOUNGER KIDS?
I MAY FIRM BELIEVER THAT, LIKE,
THE GENERATION IS GROWING AND,
NOWADAYS, WITH EVERYTHING GOING
ON, FOR CHILE, IN OUR GENERATION
, THAT WE ARE IN -- FORTUNATELY,
IN OUR GENERATION THAT WE ARE IN
RIGHT NOW, THE WHOLE UNISON
PRETTY MUCH.
MY SONS GOT RAISED BY MY AX.
SHE IS AFRICAN-AMERICAN.
HE THINKS HE'S BLACK. [LAUGHTER]
SO HAVE YOU THOUGHT OF WORKING
WITH YOUNGER KIDS?
THEY ARE THE ONES THAT ARE
SPONGES.
THEY LISTEN TO EVERYTHING.
THE OLDER ONES, OF COURSE, BUT
THE YOUNGER ONES WOULD HAVE MORE
IMPACT?
WHICH IS RESPONSIBLE FOR ITS
CAPTION CONTENT AND ACCURACY.
VISIT NCICAP.ORG] I'M JUST 1 --
D. WATKINS: I'M JUST ONE GUY.
I'VE BEEN A PROFESSIONAL THREE
YEARS NOW TOPS GOOD I'M STILL
FINDING MY WAY THROUGH ALL OF
THIS. I WOULD LIKE TO WRITE A
CHILDREN'S BOOK ONE DAY.
THAT'S WHAT IT'S ABOUT.
WHEN YOU TRY TO DO EVERYTHING,
YOU DON'T GET ANYTHING DONE.
YOU HAVE TO REALIZE THAT YOU'RE
NOT THE ONLY PERSON.
YOU'RE JUST ONE GUY.
I GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO GO TO
SO MANY SCHOOLS.
I GOT TO WORK WITH SOME HAVE AN
COMING WRITERS, PEOPLE WHO ARE
GOING TO HAVE BOOK DEALS THIS
TIME NEXT YEAR.
ABLE WHO ARE TRYING TO GET
PUBLISHED IN MAGAZINES.
SOMETIMES I CAN HELP.
SOMETIMES I CAN'T.
BUT I'M ALWAYS THERE AND ABLE TO
PROOFREAD AND CRITIQUE AND MAKE
SURE THAT, YOU KNOW, THAT THEY
HAVE A PERSON TO SUPPORT THEM
THROUGH THIS PROCESS.
TO BE HONEST, I DON'T KNOW ANY
CHILDREN.
I DON'T KNOW A LOT OF CHILDREN.
ELEMENTARY SCHOOL KIDS, THE
ENGINES, YOU KIND OF MEET ME
AROUND SIX GRADE.
ANYTHING UNDER THAT, I DON'T
HAVE -- I LIKE THEM, I JUST
DON'T MEET THEM.
I SPEAK AT COLLEGES AND HIGH
SCHOOLS AND SOME MIDDLE SCHOOLS.
THEN I SPEAK IN SOME JAILS AND
THEN I EAT DINNER AT MIDNIGHT
MOST OF THE TIME.
I SLEEP THREE OR FOUR HOURS A
DAY. I'M NEVER IN SPACES TO MEET
KIDS.
EVERY TIME I NEED A KID, IT'S
INTERESTING.
IT IS A NEW PERSPECTIVE FOR ME.
HOW IS IT DOWN THERE?
HOW ARE YOU GUYS RESPONDING TO
THE STRENGTHENING?
-- THIS WHOLE TRUMP THING?
AND THEY ARE ALL, EH, EH, EH,
EH. IF I DON'T, I BET YOU THAT I
WILL GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO HELP
SOMEONE.
THAT WAS A GREAT QUESTION.
THAT WAS GREAT AREA THAT WAS
GREAT. [APPLAUSE]
WE HAVE TIME FOR ONE MORE?
THE BOSS SAYS WE CAN DO ONE
MORE. WILL DO TOMORROW.
WILL DO BOTH.
>> HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO
DISTANCE YOURSELF WHEN YOU
STARTED STUDYING FROM THE BAD
ENVIRONMENT?
>> I ACTUALLY DIDN'T.
D. WATKINS: AS LONG AS I AM
ALIVE AND LIVING IN THE STATE OF
MARYLAND, ON GOING TO LIVE IN
EAST BALTIMORE. I AM.
THE FALSE NARRATIVE THAT WE PUT
OUT THERE -- IT'S NOT ALL BAD.
THE BEST PEOPLE ARE, THE FUNNIES
PEOPLE, THEY ARE IN MY
NEIGHBORHOOD.
WE LOVE THE PEOPLE IN OUR
NEIGHBORHOODS.
OUTSIDE OF THAT, I AM A PART OF
THAT JOURNEY.
I JUST FOUND A DIFFERENT WAY.
>> HOW DO YOU FIND MOTIVATION
AND WILLPOWER TO DO EVERYTHING
THAT YOU DO.
I KNOW AS YOU DO THINGS OVER
TIME, IT GETS HARDER.
SO HOW DO YOU MOTIVATE YOURSELF
TO KEEP GOING AND HOW MORE
PEOPLE? D. WATKINS: WHEN I GET
FRUSTRATED OR BURNED OUT, I GET
EMAILS FROM PEOPLE WHO SAY THAT
SOMETHING THAT I WORKED ON OR
SOMETHING A DID OR IN SOME WAY
THAT I HELP THE HAD CHANGE THEIR
LIVES TO SOME OF THESE PEOPLE
ARE 13 YEARS OLD.
THERE TONY AM DOING SOMETHING
THAT IS HELPING THEM DO WHAT
THEY WANT TO DO.
I DON'T FEEL LIKE HIM A LEADER
OR SOME TYPE OF GIANT.
I'M JUST A SERVANT.
I WORK FOR YOU.
THAT'S WHY I LIKE WHEN PEOPLE
ASK QUESTIONS.
I TRY NOT TO HOG THE MIKE AND
ALL THAT.
I'M STILL LEARNING MY TIMING
WITH THIS. I WORK FOR YOU ALL.
THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.
AND IF PEOPLE ARE GROWING, THEN
I'M DOING WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO
BE DOING. THANK YOU A WHOLE LOT.
I WILL MEET YOU UPSTAIRS.
[APPLAUSE] ♪
