Top of the morning to you laddies! My name is Jacksepticeye
AND WELCOME TO PORTAL 2 WITH BOB!
Jack: We're gonna try and science the shit out of everything
Bob: Hi!
Jack: Oh wait I have to gesture at you,
Jack: Can I , high five?
Jack: Um...
Bob: How do I- How do I gesture?
Jack: Q.
Jack: I'm gesturing.
Jack:  HELLO, MY NAME IS ROBOT.
Bob: I'm holding Q and the wheel is coming up but I can't pick anything!
Jack: oh..*laughs*
Bob: Why-why am I stupid?
Bob: can't believe I broke it before we were even in the game!
Jack: *laughs*
Jack: Quality content!
Jack: I think I played this with somebody online ages and ages ago...
Jack: But that was when the game came out.
Jack: I ca- can't remember any of this
Jack: OK! In we go!
Bob: I... I... I invited you to play this too. I have to say i'm supremely awful at this sort of game.
Jack: Ah great. heheheh...
Bob: I am absolute GARBAGE at puzzles.
Jack: I'm GREAT at the execution but I am not an ideas man..
Jack: Get in your pod!!
Bob: Oh.. Sorry.
Jack: God damn it
Bob: I.. If..
Jack : We have to get, um, absolutely dismantled before we go anywhere though.
Bob: Yeah why am I getting murdered?
Jack : *laughs*
Bob : Couldn't they just.. Transport us in like in a..a.. you know, like a elevator sorta situation or something?
Jack : Yeah.. Probably... Also be prepared for like... 400... Loading screens.
Bob: *giggles*
Jack : Like.. Every time you do a tiny little thing it's like.. LOADING SCREEN!
Bob : We should come up with a loading screen song..
Jack: ♪ This is the loading screen song ♪
Jack: ♪ Loading screen song ♪
Jack : ♪ We are loading ♪
Jack: ♪ Put the block on the laser beam.. ♪
Jack : ♪ Pick it up right nooowwwww!!! ♪
Jack : Was that a good song?
Bob : That- is that the song for every loading screen?
Jack : Hahaha! I-I hope not!
Jack : Cause I can't remember it!
Both: *giggle*
Bob : ♪ This is the loading screen song ♪
Bob : ♪ Loading screen song ♪
Bob : ♪ We are loading ♪
Bob : ♪ Pick up the block, put it on the thing right nooww! ♪
Jack :  ♪ Go over there and stand on the platform! ♪
Jack : ♪ Don't get your legs lasered offfffffff! ♪
Jack: Kay.
Bob : *giggling* Oh god!
Bob: Wait, this, is this gonna go
Jack: Okay, wait
Bob: Wait, this, is this gonna go
Bob: In the death water?
Bob: WHAT you doing to me?
Jack: What?
Bob: Just... I'm pretty sure this water kills me.
Jack : Ok.. Can you jump to that?
Bob : Am I supposed to jump across?
Jack : I think you can do it! I believe in you!
Jack: Oh wait.
Bob : Oh, you're gonna have to catch me with it.. Alright ready?
Jack : Ok.
Bob: thre- don't miss.
Jack: Ohhh.... Go Go Go Go! Go team!
Bob: thre- don't miss.
all: *screaming*
Bob : That didn't work.
Bob : Can we get more blocks?
Jack : No, that just resets the block!
Bob: Oh...
Jack: Have you never Portaled before?
Bob: Sorry...
Jack: Have you never Portaled before?
Jack: Oh shit....
Jack: Stop it!
Jack: Wait... We have fucking portal guns, why aren't we using them?
*Jackaboy laugh*
Bob: Oh...
Bob: Wow, that makes my brain sad inside.
*Jack laughs*
Bob: Alright, well...
Jack: It's a Portal game
Bob: You wanna do this then?
Jack: Yeah
Bob: I'll shoot the thing at the stuff and you do the regular walk around stuff?
Jack:...Okay
Jack: Okay.
Jack: You fire...
Bob: Go.
Bob: Go?
Jack: Yeah, go. Do that. Do that. Go.
Jack: It's going down
Bob: Do it.
Jack: Heeeeeeah!
Jack: I did it!
Bob: Alright, ready?
Jack: Keep that one going all the way up. 
Bob: We're gonna have to do this quick
Jack: Yep
Bob: I'm gonna have to... I'm gonna have to get this one to the right really quick and accurate
Jack: Okay, okay. Go! Go! (B: The wall goes up pretty high)
Jack: Oh, it does
Bob: Can I crush you on the ceiling, man?
Jack: Noooooo!
Jack: Don't do it! NOOOO!
Bob: What would happen if I...
Jack: NO.
Bob: What would happen if I crushed you on the ceiling?
Jack: We would fail the level and we'd fucking have to do it again. (Bob: Alright, whatever)
Bob: Look, I'll do it right. I'll do it right.
Bob: Or will I.....?
Bob: Or will I.....?
Jack: Yep. Bye~ Bob: Yeah, I will
Jack: You just burn my legs off
Bob: I can still zap you with this shit
Jack: Okay, see ya later! Bye~
Jack: OWWW
Jack: Okay...
Bob: Oh, god, I actually- I thought I couldn't shoot through there!
Jack: owww
Jack: That hurt me...
Bob: Sorry I'll stop shooting the laser
Jack: Okay, you need to go... (B: How do I get over there?)
Jack: You need to put the block on the laser and shine it over there
Bob: Over like this?
Jack: Yeah
Jack: And then you go under the thing and go through my portal.
Bob: Ohhhh I gotcha
Jack: And Bob's your uncle and also your name
Bob: Yeah, I'm not my uncle. I'm just myself.
Bob: Can we make that a phrase? Bob's yourself?
* laughter~*
GLaDOS: ... specified....
Jack: We did it, GLaDOS!
Bob: We solved it~
GLaDOS: ... when two or more people work together.
Bob: Is this...?
Jack: Oh, sorry, wrong pod.
Jack: This is your pod?
B: Oh.
J: Oh, okay.
J: Ohhhhh
B: I sort of wish it would close and be like: "You did it wrong."
B: "You're a fucking idiot."
J: Yeah, it just starts dismantling you wrong
*Bob’s laughter*
J: Taking you apart as the orange dude
J: It shows great promise, that the very first puzzle you use a portal gun in, we couldn't do...
B: I know! You're just like: "What's with these platforms...? I don't get it."
J: "What is the deal with these platforms?"
J: Aha, now over here!
B: Oh, shit
J: We actually have to use these for something.
J: Uh oh.
B: Do we have to like, go down here somehow?  Is there anywhere we can shoot a portal?
B: Oh, hey, look what I did!
J: Hey, you did it~
J: Good job
B: Insert disc, they say
B: (repeatedly) Where
J: Where would one find a disc?
J: Where, oh where, oh where is disc-o?
J: Oh wait
J: There we go
B: "Hold for Countdown?"
J: Wait, how does this work?
J: What? (B: What does that do?)
J: Ohhhh
J: There's another switch back here
B: We have to do them together.
J: Okay, 3, 2, 1!
J: Flip the nuke!
J: We did it!
B: Hey, it's just a door
J: Shit
B: Ah, fuck!
J: Are we supposed to shoot a portal through? Okay
B: We need to shoot a portal in there, yeah
J: Okay, you do the countdown this time cuz I messed it up
B: 3, 2, 1 go
B: Boop
J: Booper doop!
J: Booper doop~
J: I'm in here now~ (B: Yaaay!)
J: Booper doop
J: I got a disc! (B: We need a disc)
B: Oh, cool, that's what we need
J: Slink!
J: That's a giant disc
J: That's like a plate!
GLaDOS: You mananged to complete the....
ROBOT J: Calibrating...
GLaDOS: Oh, I almost forgot.
J: What?
GLaDOS: When you go outside the testing courses, the only way I can retrieve you
GLaDOS: Is to violently dissemble you and then...
*seductive music*
B: Oh. Yeah, is that a *scream*
B: Oh god
J: Why?
J: ♪ Loading screen, loading screen ♪
J: ♪ This is the loading screen ♪
J: That didn't meter out, properly
*giggles*
J: Yay, we're alive
B: Hey, we're back at the thingy
J: We did it
J: Team building
J: Why is there orange and... red, or, uh blue on them?
J: What's that mean?
B: That's us, bro
J: I know that. Oh, that's level four. We don't need level four.
J: We need level two
B: Level two's over here
J: Whoosh
J: And.... whoosh!
B: I can't... I may have
J: NO
J: Can I push you off? Can I push you- Damn it! *laughter*
B: You can try. Here, push me off.
*Jack grunts*
J: Fuck you
*Jack giggles*
J: Ah, dude, they're hacking up there!
*beeping noises of teh hax* {cake hacks}
B: Who's hacking?
J: I dunno (B: Oh, shit)
J: We're good at video games
B: Yeah, why would I know how this works?
J: Really helping that whole stigma of let's players being bad at games
*the laughter of the Bob*
B:  That's my whole stick, man
B: If I was good at games,  it wouldn't be entertaining
J: Precisely. See, Bob gets it
B: I know what to do! I know what to do! No, you're doing it wrong!
Jack: Put a portal over there
Jack: You need to do both portals. Ok. Bob: Do it!
Jack: AHHHH- BOOSH
Jack: niceee.. now you can do it too
Bob: YAAAAAY!
Bob: Hey, I'm not in the right place.
Jack: GO! JUMP DOWN BRO!
Jack: Right there. Right There. Bob: Do I have to. Im afraid of heights
Bob: Hey I can see you! Look through the portal.
Jack: Oh Hi!
Bob: Hey! Jack: Wait! Wait! Wait! I've got a gesture.
*Robot Waves* Jack: Hello!
Bob: I still can't- I still ca- I still can't do it
*Jack laughs at Bob's failure to gesture*
Jack: Get Rekt! Bob: Why am I not allowed to gesture, This is bullshit...
Bob: Hey, Hey! *Jack laughs as he tries to trick Bob*
Bob: You fucker Jack: Okay.
*Jack laughs*
*jack still laughing*
Bob: Oh you fucking snite, you know what. (Jack: Okay seriously.) I'm just going to go over here. This- This is fine. I'll just stay in the corner.
Jack: I'm good, I'm done, I'm done sorry
Jack: Okay i'll put.
Bob:  Thumbs down.
Jack: I'll give myself a thumbs down
Bob: Thumbs down for me.
Jack: Okay go
Jack: Yeah
Bob: I almost missed the hole *Laughing*
Jack: You thought I was going to do it, didn't you?
Bob: I was pretty sure you were going to do it yeah
Jack: Naw. There's a, there's a fine night limit, on those things when they get really REALLY annoying
Bob: Yeah but the way to make it funny is to keep going until it gets super anoying and then keep going past that, (Jack: till it get's funny again) till you almost explode and murder each other and then keep going past that then it's funny
Bob: Where the fuck do we get the cube?
Bob: Where are you Companion cube dispenser?
Bob: what are you doin'?
Jack: Im up here now!
Jack: Wait there's things on the
Jack: Can I fly across somewhere?
Jack: is there a thing up here?
Bob: jack, here i got you
Bob: Go trough there
Jack: HeheheNHEEAH
Jack: Yeah i did it!
Bob: i think we need to go to the other side first
Bob: can you jump down?
Jack: HUP!
Bob: And shoot a Portal up where im looking at that thing
Bob: and then i'll fly across and then i can portal back where you just went
Jack: Aaah i getcha'
Bob: Wait no i can't, No i can't hang on hang on
Bob: Leave those there im ready!
*jack laugh*
Bob: Fuck Fuck Fuck me fuck, alright!
Jack: Whai whaa
Bob: we need to do.. i need to do that and then jump
Bob: and then i got your back *jack Scream*
Jack: aaaaaaahhhhhhh
Bob: and I said I was bad a puzzles, alright now you get your self up in that jumping hole
Jack: wait I don't...
J: Hupp B: And then i put..uh.. this...
J:Is that enough for me to get across?
B: Think so that's how we did it before isn't it J: I'm scared.
J: AHHHHHHH  GERONIMO
Woo yeah!  B: And than we push both these buttons
hup! yeah I got em' all (okay ash catchem) B: and fuck yeah!...is there fall damage?
J: No.
J:Yeah high five *pfft* B: Hi-hi... i pushed Q it's-it's not doin it
J: Hahaha you can't gesture haha
B: Fucking how about this can you do this?
(B: Point to this!) J: I can point really well!
J: Huh? huh? how would you like it if I point at cha!?
J:Awwww I can't gesture on the loading screen thing... );
J: Just like going into the thing like HELLO
J: Were good at this!
B: yeah I nailed that one i'm the best at puzzles turns out!
J: Bob has a brain inside his head
B: I'm a puzzle master
J: well...~  J: Okay here we go figured it out did it!
B: Uhhh actually i think that is what we need
J: Okay yeah. that I told you that's what we needed to do!
B: Go somewhere and shoot out of here while...
...someone's holding that button where we
jump off from okay you need to look
forward to the Bologna and above think
you're ready for this shit
yeah oh god oh you're fired get out and
look at the top of my own hey man look
all right you need to get rid of the top
one
yeah I got you I got you i'm having a
cents are quite glad this is there a i
I press the button and you do it
who ya.. J:Oh got it's timed go!
it's oh I throw first okay okay very
often
yeah oh yeah oh yeah I don't know that
Wow yes oh I can
yeah but that's a good eyeball you got
their boss and sweaters to go through
another loading coming up just do like a
bunch of them all at once
click support of your absence you're
crazy and I'm laughing she would be kind
of cool actually what we could just jump
down to it we can travel instead of it
how much can you like what did you hurt
your ankle
no you just close this is low-impact
exploration with this is she saying
something to us i don't care what's the
floor goes away haha hey right you need
to come right here
yeah i was just about to say I think you need to
gesture me to come down
alright and then I can't get up there
How in  the shit I don't know man
hahaha mobile access even turning right
now all I know what to do but I know
what to do first
come up here right here bc i'm pointing
my
up here and put your portal here tonight
thinking that walked around
yeah and then I'll start fallin and then
you launch me
okay that's okay i trust you Bob are you
following trust unit i'm falling full
speed is very sound like you find it
shows me on my screen I got
picture-in-picture I just your gesture
i'm doing gestures at the air
oh I really shit while I really slammed
into the can you can you do that yeah
yeah and then I'm gonna drop you cut
your vital valuable things alright I
gotta ball you like my balls i do that's
very nice ball not going to destroy its
registrated I mean to drive up beautiful
take it
yay ball ball ball ball ball when you
got all ball sits a ball you can get
without idiots after all
yeah that's when we redeem ourselves we
be level for assistance with this world
to level 40
I mean I'm not one to brag but what up
rest of the world we got the same thing
going on here again can't let you know
how we got there I dude I got you bro
homie g how this will work
ok go through the thing over to purchase
one of these I got you you ready
you have to press the button when you
come out of this I'm at full speed let's
do it
oh god what you got got it
ok alright come back and do another one
for me
Oh read more and more momentum of a mess
it up
alright i'm at full speed let's do this
shit
yeah i got the buttons did I not get the
other side
no it's what I know it do I know what
you need to do
okay i don't like to do but i'm not good
at timing it
oh wait i know i know i love in the air
you just need to put the platform on the
other thing yeah yeah
oh god get it got a second have fun
things like no I get your own I got my
own
yeah really ball soccer fashionable
enough i think our ball together people
who look I'm multiplying the balls that
we have that's actually really fucking
weird isn't it and yeah was like Eric
what if I just mix it up with these
crazy balls-up off and break all your
balls bitch i just make more of them
damn it really keeps your this place
sucks
baton taps i'm out i like that we have
to look at each other being dismantled
as the real good look at me look at me
get this assemble not looking to do you
know who you're lucky here we could be
that you can hope can't shoot you but I
could use that I bet you can't I bet you
can't wait to see I've the smart out I
brought you know you can't get through
well I can't do it yes away its again
oh I'm going to shave a sad emoji all I
bet you have Wi-Fi
I just involuntarily high-five you yeah
can control board so far away can I do
that Rob where bitch no damage to focus
on cod and half is Camilla yeah
Cookson's nobody la you're face is
writing my dust when yeah that's such a
non-consensual hope they clog up the
flat biggest one
hey I understand the puzzle I figured it
out first I'm smart to see you happy
haha oh you fucking bitch
oh gods are no yeah-oh the public input
lucky man
oh he's been another one why we fly
oh I got it what
ok I don't get it haha yes
wait what perhaps maybe go back
ah good tips fucked up okay you enjoy
doing so you go you jump through there
and then shoot blue
no yes shoot we'll put in front of you
know dark blue you're watching flood
like this
ok i left now that is i think i have to
put one on this and then you go flying
further know you want you want to do
this we're going to wait just gotta go
at the asia i didn't know the back on
advise the end yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
he out
oh fuck there's another thing here hot
cheese that gosh how in the shits mac-10
just want a thing on this but how
no wait i know i have it do i do I don't
trust your know your things
wait no wait i figured it out i truly
did alright same setup as last time I
don't think I figured it out
can you leave a portal on the jump pad
and then put the orange one on this yet
that's the thing that's what I had
figured out all right I get it I get it
now so I think you're going to it
bounces you back out there are you ready
yeah you're doing orange now go through
the jump pad
oh yeah we get 0 and this and then I
just give it the old huh yeah
hey quite i/o body their army of going
to happen it's ok i could give you all
of it huh what does this button do it
opens up a thing two platforms but oh
can't you can launch itself in there now
oh wait wait very honest I got all you
get that yeah I see how he was doing
there
I see you need to hand that up to me I
get it now
I can't whoa oh ok bro
and yes if you got it
and he got it he got it yeah I McGee
neress now you just like this bro and
it's no big deal no big deal bro you
just go to victory bro
yeah but we're from there fuck all right
now do that and then i will i will
launch you further will you
well Wow truly will is their portal of
some sort over there is a wall can you
shoot anywhere down
yeah shoot your other one but yeah yeah
that makes sense i'm going to have to
launch you just have to walk through do
this
hey oh my god yes would be shit did you
gesture turn know down here that's fine
I thought that looks till your arms are
so long
except this time we're going to play the
game now
yeah Crouch run through only a look look
at your dumb face
we can you play your dumb self what you
fuck you I'm leaving okay i like the way
by shit what's up how there's a
launchpad IC ok now if I just don't be a
fucking dingus
here we go don't be one of that here we
are shit I got you bro come out
don't walk backwards go in the hole go
in the hole bro
ok I needed to launch further though you
you needed to bring a cube with you is
the whole thing where is the cube i
don't know and i think i think this up
here is the cube dispensers and it that
big up there
oh yes how do we open that shit white
you
me and my buddies over here oh I'm going
off shit the buttons over there
alright I think about that or even get
yeah yeah got it and then we put that
under think you're down here breath but
got gotti not gonna elevator you off
no I think you're gonna I think that
just opens the door I think you still
need to do the things for me know why
did they jumped down okay well I that
same shit and i had got it I got it
thank you
you doing alright so then i'll go do
this and you you hook me up with that
same day I'm dude I got you I got you
like it up little kids we give me your
six churches
yeah they got you holding it at all here
you come here you go my boy racer all
just all the matter the hour oh okay
jeez I high specific sweet today with
some clever and smart and ultimate
tournament everyone wishes they were us
yeah but it i think is the same blue
gems
oh god oh god oh god oh well I made a
box oh no the box flew away blank tipica
she's been kind of sending towards you
and I got ideas that idea how I got
there we go there we go you have to put
another one here
yes yeah back across we have the time it
ok and what
that ok a problem my god that it's
called me i could not have been
perpetually already you're ready
yeah it's too much it's all those people
sorry i got your attitude i doing you
want to get you guys
well I got put better sooner I said yeah
you can buy that got off lucky I got
your back to Russia love ya
oh my god we fucking don't did pop up
that was amazing
ok whatever homie but i find something
to grow up coming from inconsequential
row casually I don't know specifically
good night that was brilliant
you have got one of you were doing
something like with a fucking pieces
yeah yet
ok finally I'd like poison bouncer to
him as well
the voices you hear what happened in
motion without of existence my whole
solving it was everything was about am
excited out Subtitle credit Ethan Pinto Bean
 
