(electronic whirring)
(upbeat music)
- See you tomorrow, Tao.
- Oh, actually, if you
guys are free tonight,
I'm gonna be broadcasting on Twitch
as Azn Invasion,
that's A Z N,
around 7:10, if you guys are free.
I'm gonna be playing The
Lion King on Super Nintendo.
It's notoriously hard.
- I'll meet you downstairs.
- Okay.
- Oh, you should be a guest on it,
we could play that Daddy
Dating Simulator game.
It's a game where you find
the best daddies in your area
to date and hopefully have sex with.
- Tao, I've been in your position before,
so I want you to listen
to me very carefully.
(suspenseful music)
Your Twitch stream will fail.
(scoffs)
- Screw you, man.
Why are you being such a.
- Because you think the world
needs another Twitch stream.
You think that you're so interesting
that just watching you play video games
counts as entertainment.
- But I am fun to watch.
I make jokes about the
games while I play them.
- And you think that's funny?
Making little quips about the
absurdity of video game logic?
- Yeah, like, isn't it funny
that a mushroom makes Mario big?
I mean, what if a shiitake
mushroom made me big.
(inhales)
(dramatic music)
It'd be wild.
- Tao, that's hack.
- But I'm good at the games, too.
I can beat Ocarina of Time in 12 hours,
with just three hearts.
- There are people who
can beat it in 17 minutes,
blindfolded, solving a Rubik's Cube,
why would anyone watch you?
- Because I'm hot.
I mean, creative, creative.
I was thinking of role playing
as a post office worker
in GTA V, and like, drive around
pretending like I'm delivering mail.
You know, instead of killing people.
- Tao, listen to yourself.
- It's fun and whimsical.
- It's not only sad,
it's been done by thousands before you.
- It's just fun, I'm
just having fun online.
- What's fun about it?
- I just love playing video games,
I wanna share that with my friends.
- So just do that.
Why does it have to be a Twitch stream?
- Because I wanna be
an influencer.
- Is that really what you want?
You wanna take a once pleasurable activity
and turn it into a non-stop
slog of begging for subscribers.
You wanna constantly be at
the mercy of what's trending.
You want every single
embarrassing thing you say,
and you will say them,
to be preserved and
re-watched for eternity.
Wouldn't you rather just lose at Fortnite?
- Yes.
(crying)
Yes.
- I know.
Now, if you'll excuse me.
What's up, Instagram?
It's Grant O'Brien coming at you live.
(electronic whirring)
Tao, tell them why you're crying.
- I wanna be a Twitch influencer.
(crying)
- Isn't that stupid?
(electronic whirring)
- Hey everyone, thanks for watching.
Now I know I just wrote a sketch
about why you shouldn't
start a Twitch channel,
but now I'm actually going to plug
Dropout's newest Twitch channel,
where we'll be streaming at
least three times a week.
So go over there and subscribe,
and feel free to roast me in
the comments for this plug.
