DOMINANCE HIERARCHY (Echoing)
Have you heard of the
dominance hierarchy? A term coined by
Jordan Peterson? He's a man on the rise and he's got some really interesting takes I
think in perspectives on a lot of kind
of hot topics in the media right now. You
can tell the guy does a lot of thinking
for himself and it's not just
regurgitating "Yahoo articles," like most
people do but his belief and he talks
about this a little bit in his book 212
principles which I also read a couple
weeks ago that men are hard-wired to
look and tell where they fall in the
dominance hierarchy which just basically
means how do you stack up in terms of
dominance versus everyone else out there
and he talks about how we naturally in
our heads know where we rank and then we
just kind of know our role and we just
kind of accept it and looking around
this seems somewhat true to me it does
seem very true but the thing I don't
like about it is in his books and in his
lectures he talks about this and he
talks about how in different creature--
I think it's lobsters or crabs it's the
same way but he doesn't give any
practical tips on how to grow or how to
rise in the dominance hierarchy it's
almost like he thinks that the way that
you're born or once you get to a certain
point you're done kind of changing and
developing that you are where you are
you're kind of stuck almost like a caste
system which is not the case at all so
in this video I want to give two quick
ways that you can immediately rise in
the dominance hierarchy the way I like
to explain it is that in any social
interaction there's an interaction
equilibrium and that's where each person
sees themselves in terms of social value
versus the other person so for instance
after a rock concert the the the lead
singer is talking to a fan backstage how
do you think that interaction
equilibrium looks or dominance hierarchy
however you want explain it well like
this right the person has way higher
social value and the person down here
and they're gonna act like it right
what's the fan gonna do gonna be
screaming oh my gosh I can't believe I
get to beat you oh my gosh and what's
the rock star gonna be doing yeah cool
good to meet you awesome glad you came
appreciate it right in all their
communication they've accepted those
roles now that's an extreme example it's
hard to find an example more crazy than
that but what about like in the
workplace where there's just some guy
there who always kind of talks down to
you and acts like he's little higher
than you clearly he thinks he's higher
than you and the dominance hierarchy
what can you do I'm gonna teach you
there's so many different things you can
do but in this video I'm gonna teach you
two and the first one that's so easy and
so powerful just tweak your vocal
tonality so when you're talking to
someone like that go from a rapport
neutral or you see yourself as having a
rapport neutral tone which just means to
kind of quickly explain them rapport
neutral is how you talk to your friends
or appear just the way you normally talk
rapport seeking or supplicate if those
are the same tone that's like a fan to
the rock star oh my gosh I can't believe
you're here how is your weekend are you
we're poor breaking the best example I
can think of as a police officer talk
license and registration
right not trying to impress anybody they
have the authority they're bossing
around you how fast you were going okay
all I want you to do in this instance is
go from a rapport neutral to a bit of a
rapport breaking tone okay so if you're
talking to them maybe you're just at the
coffee shop and it's Monday or you're
the coffee area and you're here
corporation should probably go to the
coffee shop some guy who talks down to
you but you go up there and you're
talking about your weekend and say this
guy's name is Bill and he always talks
down to you a little bit well when
you're talking about your weekend go
from yeah we went out we were on the
motorcycles - yeah we went out we're on
the motorcycles it was a beautiful day
we went out there how about you how was
your weekend you changed that tonality a
little bit and all of a sudden
subconscious in their head likewise
barren talking like that he sounds much
more confident he sounds much more
high-value in high-status he's likely
not thinking through these things
logically but his subconscious is
telling him that and now when you
continue to do this every time you speak
to him you've taken it a touchdown to
rapport a little bit rapport breaking or
what you think is rapport breaking a lot
of people don't understand the way they
actually sound when they speak it they
think they're in a rapport neutral voice
they're actually too supplicating tone
but you take it down one step
immediately you're gonna rise in the
dominance hierarchy and rise in the
interaction equilibrium and displayed
you're basically saying hey bud you
don't have any higher status than me you
don't have any higher value than me and
I'm gonna communicate that through the
way that I talk it's gonna be tough a
lot of times when people first try to
use a bit more of a true rapport neutral
report breaking tone they find it tough
like oh do I sound like a jerk I sound
like this no you sound like you are on
the same level as this person you're
just used to talking in this other way
because the other person's higher than
you on the dominance hierarchy now the
power of your voice is so impacting on
every single level of your social status
and your social value and that's all I
want to talk about for that one in this
video but if you're looking to improve
the power of your voice so when you talk
people stop and they want to listen it
commands attention and respect I suggest
you go to vocal power boot camp comm you
can touch or click up here as well I've
got a video there that's gonna walk you
through more how you can improve your
voice regardless what kind of voice that
you're born with now the second thing
you can do is a body language technique
so in this instance all you're gonna do
is orient your body thirty five to forty
four thirty to forty five-degree thirty
two point five to seventy nine degrees
thirty to forty five degrees away from
the person so let's say once again
you're talking to Bill in the shop and
he's being you know just a little bit
like aloof and he's talking limit down
to you all you gonna do just turn a
little bit away and now you're talking
to him but you're just kind of like this
what does that communicate you could
probably picture in your mind what that
communicates right now not that
interested in what you have to say when
you're talking to somebody like the boss
you're squared up immediately yes sir
how do you do how was your day
and all of a sudden you're yeah yeah we
went out it was it was a nice day we
actually finally got to catch up on that
barbecue place that I'm not sure if I
told you about we were looking at it a
really good time how is that different
then yeah we finally got to eat that
barbecue place we're looking at has a
really good time totally different feel
and it communicates that you're higher
on the dominance hierarchy those are two
very easy ways to immediately boost your
level on that now what do you do when
someone actually tries to make fun of
you what if you're in a situation where
you're trying to
look really good it's important to you
and someone's trying to make fun of you
what do you do how do you handle it I
was out on a first date two days ago in
Dallas Texas and there were three guys
sitting to my right that tried to make
fun of me if you want I'll tell you the
full story right here and break down
exactly how I handled it so you know how
to handle if it happens to you if you
haven't checked out that video and the
Volkl power boot camp calm you can touch
right here to go check it out there I'll
talk to you soon no said not heard of
something good
