On this episode of China Uncensored,
who says spies need to be undercover?
Hi, welcome to China Uncensored,
I’m your host Chris Chappell.
Can I just say what an awesome job
the Chinese Communist Party is doing in Xinjiang?
I mean, it’s basically like Cheers.
“Sometimes you want to go where everybody
knows your name.”
Only they don’t just know your name.
They know your face, too!
I mean, between the convenience police stations
on every corner…
and the vocational training camps
that promote stability and employment
through the use of police batons,
electric cattle prods, handcuffs, and pepper
spray,
I’m sure the ethnic Uighurs of Xinjiang
feel very safe
and well cared for by the Chinese Communist
Party.
Of course, it’s possible that some don’t.
But not to worry—the Communist Party
has a solution for them, too.
Because even though there’s all this fancy,
newfangled surveillance, facial recognition,
DNA-scanning, yada yada, technology,
the Communist Party hasn’t forgotten the
importance
of good old-fashioned people-to-people connections.
And by connections, I mean spying.
That’s why the Party has ordered a million
Han Chinese
to move into the villages and homes of Uighurs
across Xinjiang.
Now I know what you’re thinking.
That’s a terrible idea.
Won’t that lead to overcrowding?
Don’t worry, the Party is smarter than you.
It just so happens that,
with all those Uighurs in voluntary vocational
training camps,
there are a lot of empty beds and broken homes
to fill.
The Communist Party’s program is called
United as One Family.
And keeping with the family theme, the Uighurs
are required to call their guests “relatives”;
brothers and sisters.
Big brothers and sisters.
And the Xinjiang Communist Youth League
has posted a bunch of photos showing
how much all the Uighurs love this plan.
Whether it's sharing a bed with your two Han
Chinese sisters...
Reading together Xi Jinping’s report for
the 19th National Congress of the Chinese
Communist Party...
or making sure the kids are learning Mandarin
Chinese
instead of their native language.
There are actually many photos of people sharing
beds together,
which I guess is an important part of being
united as one family?
And hey, here’s a bit of friendly advice
for
all you Uighurs watching from Xinjiang.
“The government reportedly tried to promote
drinking and smoking,
because people who didn’t drink or smoke—
such as devout Muslims—
were deemed suspicious.”
So when your big brother offers to share a
drink with you, take it.
I’m kidding of course.
There’s no way Uighurs in Xinjiang are watching
this.
They’re too busy studying Marxism and Xi
Jinping thought.
But before you start hating on the Han Chinese
who are in Xinjiang occupying people’s homes—
you should know that many of them love
the Communist Party’s program
just as much as the Uighurs do.
I mean, they volunteered for it...
you know, like how Uighurs are
volunteering to be in those concentration
camps.
Concentration camps in the sense that
they have to really concentrate hard,
since they’re learning all those new job
skills.
But who are the Han Chinese being dispatched
to stay in Uighur homes for days or weeks
at a time?
At first, they were mostly Communist Party
members.
But now, since the Party has run low on those,
the latest wave of 1 million “relatives”
have been low to mid-level civil servants.
Imagine being a doctor in a state-run hospital
and then being told part of your job
is now spying on people every month.
In the far away deserts of Xinjiang.
Of course, some of the Han Chinese truly believe
the Party propaganda that they’re doing
a good thing,
and creating ethnic harmony with their homestays.
Like it’s Habitat for Humanity,
except with more spying.
For others, well, according to anthropologist
Darren Byler,
who wrote this ChinaFile article,
“Two of those [Han Chinese] I interviewed
told me that they,
or their friends who had been asked to go
down to the villages,
would have lost their jobs if they had
refused to participate in the monitoring program,
but they also said that by participating they
had been
guaranteed promotions upon the completion
of their tour of duty.”
And any Chinese people
who express sympathetic views towards the
Uighurs
might be in trouble.
Like Zhang Haitao, an ethnic Han Chinese,
spent years criticizing the policies in Xinjiang
on social media.
But at the end of last year,
“He was arrested and prosecuted for subversion
and espionage.
His punishment—20 years in prison.”
Meanwhile, Uighurs who have these people
staying in their homes feel afraid,
stripped of their dignity,
and like every aspect of their life is a political
test.
So clearly,
both Han Chinese and Uighurs love the United
as One Family program.
But perhaps some big brothers and sisters
may wonder:
What am I supposed to be doing here?
Fortunately, the Communist Party has created
a helpful manual for you.
Aww look!
The two hands holding each other make a heart.
This can’t be sinister!
After all, how sinister can it be if it’s
from Shutterstock?
Back to the daily routine for the Han Chinese
“volunteers.”
In the mornings,
you can take your Uighur hosts to sing patriotic
songs
at the daily flag-raising ceremonies
outside the village Party office.
At night, take them to classes on Xi Jinping
thought.
The rest of the day is your typical mix of
watching
state-approved television shows,
singing more patriotic songs,
and of course, asking questions!
For example, you can ask them:
Do you have any relatives living abroad?
Have you ever attended a mosque outside the
village?
How’s your Arabic?
And if any of their answers,
“felt incomplete, or if they seemed to be
hiding anything,
the children should be questioned next.”
See?
The Communist Party is even thinking of the
children!
The Chinese regime has declared Islam a contagious
disease.
So while these Uighurs might act friendly
and secular,
they might secretly be trying to hold onto
their religion and culture.
Here’s how the Party says you can find out.
Offer a member of your host family a cigarette
or a sip of beer.
Provide random bags of ground meat for dinner.
Find ways to make physical contact with a
member of the opposite sex.
If any of that makes them uncomfortable,
you should “report any resistance” to
the relevant authorities.
That way, your hosts can be sent off to one
of
the many vocational training camps to receive
training
on how they should ditch their religion
for Marxism and Xi Jinping Thought!
Oh, and here’s another tip for dealing with
resistance:
Try to convince your new family
that you already know everything about them.
“The manual instructs the relatives
to tell their ‘little brothers and sisters’
that they have been monitoring all Internet
and cell phone communication
that is coming from the family,
so they should not even think about lying
when it comes to their knowledge of Islam
and religious extremism.”
Look, this policy is incredibly disturbing.
The Chinese Communist Party is creating a
system where,
in the name of ethnic harmony,
they are pitting Han Chinese and Uighurs against
each other.
Of course, ethnic harmony is a good thing.
But the way to get there is probably not
to force one group of people to help destroy
the families
and communities of another group of people.
China Digital Times translated this article
from a Han Chinese university student in Xinjiang.
He talks about living under the growing security
state,
watching his Uighur teachers slowly disappear
into the camps,
and about how no one could talk about it
for fear that they would also be reported
to the Party.
That student realized that he was being trained
to be part of the security apparatus
and managed to leave the country.
But most people in Xinjiang aren’t so lucky--
especially the Uighurs.
Like this ChinaFile article says,
“Citizens of totalitarian states
are nearly always compelled to act in ways
that deny their ethical obligations.”
No one is allowed to think about what they’re
doing.
I know, this all sounds like so much fun for
everyone.
So between all the hair combing
making probably non-halal dumplings!
and putting up Pictures of Xi Jinping
….the Han big brothers and sisters and their
Uighur hosts
have important work to do for their country.
So what do you think of the Communist Party’s
plan to force Han Chinese to live with Uighurs?
Leave your comments below.
And now is the moment you’ve all been waiting
for!
When I answer questions
from a member of the China Uncensored 50 cent
army—
the fans who make this show possible
by contributing through the crowd funding
website Patreon.
Karan Joshi asks,
“Could the People's Republic of China
ever split up like the Soviet Union?
A very interesting, politically sensitive
question!
As this lovely gif shows,
the territory of what we call China
has changed a lot over the centuries.
If or when the Communist Party falls,
the reaction could be different in different
places.
And there are some big question marks over
certain regions.
Xinjiang is known by Uighurs as East Turkestan.
Some people there might want to break off
into their own country.
Same goes for Tibet.
Although doing that would not be as easy as
it sounds.
Other places are harder to say.
Would Taiwan want to rejoin a Communist free
China?
Would Taiwan lead a Communist free China?
Or would Taiwan get to finally call itself
a country?
What about Hong Kong and Macau?
So it could be similar to the fall of the
Soviet Union,
where some of the outlying parts do break
off
to become independent countries.
Or the non-People’s Republic might survive
largely intact.
But either way,
there’ll still be a very large country
that calls itself China.
Thanks for your question.
And if you’d me to answer your question,
join up in the China Uncensored 50-army.
We have a very low mortality rate.
And for only a dollar or more per episode,
we’ll give you some cool perks
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that I could answer right here on the show.
So head over to Pateron.com/chinauncensored
to learn more.
Thanks for watching this episode of China
Uncensored.
Once again I’m your host Chris Chappell,
see you next time.
