BILL, THEY SAY AT A DINNER PARTY
YOU SHOULD NEVER TALK ABOUT SEX,
POLITICS OR RELIGION.
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN INVITED TO A
DINNER PARTY IN YOUR LIFE?
ARE THERE THINGS YOU WON'T TALK
ABOUT?
>> I PROBABLY WOULDN'T BE
INVITED TO YOUR DINNER PARTY
BECAUSE WE'RE VERY OPPOSITE.
>> Stephen: REALLY, HOW SO?
HOW ARE WE OPPOSITE?
REALLY?
>> YOU'RE MARRIED AND RELIGIOUS.
>> Stephen: YEAH, I'M MARRIED
AND I GIVE RELIGION A SHOT.
>> I THOUGHT YOU WERE A
PRACTICING CATHOLIC.
>> Stephen: I AM.
DOESN'T MEAN I'M GOOD AT IT.
(LAUGHTER)
HONEST TO GOD.
I SUCK.
I SUCK AS A CATHOLIC.
DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T KEEP
DOING-- YOU WERE RAISED
CATHOLIC.
>> I WAS RAISED CATHOLIC.
>> Stephen: COME ON BACK,
BILL.
(LAUGHTER)
THE DOOR IS ALWAYS OPEN!
GOLDEN TICKET RIGHT BEFORE YOU,
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS HUMBLE
YOURSELF BEFORE THE PRESENCE OF
THE LORD, ADMIT THERE ARE THINGS
GREATER THAN YOU IN THE UNIVERSE
THAT YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND.
AND SALVATION AWAITS YOU.
TAKE PASS KAL'S WAGER AM IF YOU
ARE WRONG, YOU ARE AN IDIOTMENT
BUT IF I'M RIGHT YOU'RE GOING TO
HELL.
(LAUGHTER)
>> I DO ADMIT THERE ARE THINGS
IN THE UNIVERSE I DON'T
UNDERSTAND.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
>> BUT MY RESPONSE TO THAT IS
NOT TO MAKE UP SILLY STORIES.
(APPLAUSE).
>> Stephen: THEY'RE PRETTY
GOOD STORIES, SOME ARE PRETTY
GOOD STORIES, BILL.
>> OR TO BELIEVE INTELLECTUALLY
EMBARRASSING MYTHS FROM THE
BRONZE AGE BUT YOU BELIEVE
WHATEVER YOU WANT.
>> Stephen: WELL, YEAH, I MEAN
I HAVE A CONNECTION TO OUR
ANCESTORS BECAUSE I.
>> SURE.
>> Stephen: BECAUSE I.
>> THESE WERE MEN WHO DID NOT
KNOW WHAT A GERM OR AN ATOM WAS
OR WHERE THE SUNT WENT-- SUN
WENT AT NIGHT AND THAT IS WHERE
YOU ARE GETTING YOUR WISDOM.
ANYWAY, LET'S NOT-- .
>> Stephen: I LIKE IT.
>> LET'S NOT ARGUE.
>> Stephen: I LIKE IT.
I COULD EAT A BIG BOWL OF THIS.
THIS IS GOOD.
TASTY.
YOU SEE MY RELIGION TEACHES ME
HUMILITY IN THE FACE OF THIS
KIND OF ATTACK.
>> I SEE THIS.
YOU BROUGHT IT UP.
>> Stephen: I DIDN'T BRING
ANYTHING UP.
>> YOU GAVE ME A BIG LECTURE ON
COME BACK TO THE CHURCH.
>> Stephen: I DID NOT GIVE-- I
GAVE YOU AN INVITATION.
A LECTURE.
IT'S AN INVITATION.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THIS GUY GAVE ME A HUGE LECTURE
ABOUT GOING TO DINNER.
(LAUGHTER)
I WILL EAT WHEN I WANT TO, THANK
YOU.
>> I WILL EAT WHAT I WANT.
ITALIAN, ITALIAN FOOD.
HOW DARE YOU!
>> I'VE HAD MORE INVITING
INVITATIONS.
