(Cues: Wiz & Boomstick - Brandon Yates)
Wiz: For years humans have gazed at the stars.
Contemplating the possibilities of first contact with an alien race.
Will we exchange gifts of peace?
Or weapons of war?
Boomstick: Weapons.
Definitely weapons.
Like these ones.
Wiz: Ben 10, Protector of Earth and wielder of the Omnitrix.
Boomstick: And Green Lantern, Galactic lawman bearer of the Power Ring.
He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who will win...
A DEATH BATTLE!
Wiz: Benjamin Tennyson was just your average ten year old boy.
He loved video games, hated school, and was prepared to have the most boring summer vacation ever.
Until destiny fell from the sky.
Ben: (screaming)
Upon discovering a strange crash landed alien device.
It stuck itself upon his wrist with secrets that it hid.
Boomstick: 🎶 Now he's got superpowers, he's no ordinary kid. 🎶
🎶 He's Ben 10. 🎶
Sorry Wiz.
I just can't help myself that theme song is so damn catchy.
Wiz: This strange device was the Omnitrix.
A portable library of intergalactic genetic data that can transform its user into a variety of different alien species.
Boomstick: Sounds like the perfect way to get freaky with some alien babes from all across the galaxy.
Wiz: Well you do you.
But the cosmic warlord Vilgax had something different in mind.
With the Omnitrix technology he planned to create an army of super powered aliens and conquer the universe.
Boomstick: Yeah typical villain stuff.
But old hentai face would have to wait 'cause Ben got the watch first and became a superhero.
Well okay first he burned down a forest.
But then he got busy with the hero stuff.
Wiz: The Omnitrix contains a built-in radio, universal translator, distress signal, a self defense pulse blast against anyone trying to force it off Ben's wrist.
And as a bonus.
It can tell time.
Boomstick: And whenever Ben comes across a new alien he'd like to cosplay.
He can scan their DNA so he can add them to his transformation collection.
And he's got a ton to choose from.
He's got alien forms that can control the elements like lightning, water, ice, earth and fire with his very first transformation ever.
Heatblast.
Along with some just beautiful fire puns.
Heatblast: I'm totally hot.
(laughs)
Boomstick: Ah you gotta respect the classics.
Wiz: As Four Arms he's strong enough to create shockwaves with mere punches.
As XLR8 he can run fast enough to dodge lightning.
As Diamondhead he can survive massive explosions like they were nothing.
But if you prefer brains over brawn like myself.
He can increase his intelligence with aliens forms like Brainstorm.
Who has an IQ of 1 nonillion.
That's a 1 followed by 30 zeros.
And more than 3 octillion times greater than highest recorded IQ in history.
Boomstick: He can fly as Jetray.
Duplicate himself with Ditto.
And eat his feelings away as Upchuck.
Wiz that's really not the healthy way to handle issues.
Wiz: You know you're right Boomstick.
Boomstick: Yeah you should really just stick to alcohol.
Though if he ever wants to suck for some reason he's got Walkatrout.
Which is a fish with legs.
And that's it.
Wiz: Probably Ben's worst transformation.
And that's saying a lot considering he has an alien literally named.
Boomstick: If old timey horror movies are your thing.
Ben can transform into every classic monster you can think of.
Because I guess zombies and werewolves were aliens all along.
I KNEW it.
Wiz: Through different forms Ben can manipulate the fundamental forces of the universe.
Like gravity, radiation, time and energy.
Feedback for instance once absorbed the entirety of the Big Bang.
And then fired it at a robot supervillain creating a time loop and saving the universe.
Boomstick: Yeah as he got used to hero work.
Ben's aliens startin' to get pretty insane.
Like Way Big who's basically a giant kaiju who can fire a cosmic ray from his chest powerful enough to hurt a being made of pure energy.
And let's not forget my personal favorite alien: Mole-Stache.
He's a mole who punches people with his moustache.
(laughs)
You can't write that.
Wiz: Truly a fearsome edition to Ben's massive arsenal.
But contrary to the show's various specific title.
Ben's Omnitrix doesn't just have access to 10 alien forms.
In fact it has 1,000,912.
Boomstick: 🎶He's no ordinary kid.🎶
🎶He's Ben 1,000,912.🎶
Yeah doesn't...
Doesn't quite roll up the tongue like Ben 10 does it.
Well let's see if I can take one of these babies for a spin.
Wiz: Where did you get that?
Boomstick: Don't worry 'bout it.
Wiz: Well the Omnitrix does have one drawback.
It usually has an automatic cooldown period for a few minutes between transformations.
Because overuse can permanently disfigure the user's DNA.
You could’ve said that four seconds earlier?
Now if you'll excuse me I need to pee out my face.
Wiz: (sighs)
I'll fix this later.
This cooldown would be ocurring issue for Ben.
Until he discovered Master Control.
A special code which when input into the Omnitrix just let him use however he wanted it.
Boomstick: And if he's ever on death's door, the watch would automatically pop in to whatever alien body think he needs at the time to survive whatever's happenin'.
Wiz: And there's one form that's almost always the best answer.
Alien X.
Born in the Forge of Creation beyond the multiverse itself.
Alien X is a Celestialsapien.
The most powerful species in the universe.
He's basically a cosmic god who can punch planets to bits, fly faster than light, duplicate himself, control minds, use telekinesis, reverse time, warp reality and even just straight up erase people from existence.
Ben (16 year old): It takes a lot to get their attention and that's fine.
We don't want it.
Ben (10 year old): Why not?
Kevin: They can just blink.
And we'd be gone.
Boomstick: Alien X is so tough he survived the destruction of the entire universe by the Anihilaarg.
And didn't feel a thing.
By his durability was so through the roof he didn't even realize total cosmic annihiliation was happenin' right on top of him.
Wiz: Based on rough estimance made by NASA's astrophysicists the total mass energy of the universe in jules it's 4.
Boomstick: Well that doesn't seem very impressive.
Wiz: Followed by 69 zeroes.
Boomstick: Oh there it is.
Wiz: And to top it off.
Ben has Alien X went and just remade an entire new universe identical to the old one.
Boomstick: First of all: How the hell?
Second: Since he just made a copy universe that's technically means that all those characters we watched through the whole show are still dead.
Damn dude!
Throw somebody a bone or somethin'.
Wiz: However Celestialsapiens are composed of multiple personalities.
And if they can't unanimously agree on one action to take which could take billions of years.
All that power is basically useless.
Boomstick: But Ben's conviced his extra personalities and that's really godamn stupid and he's should've had full control all the time.
So it doesn't matter.
Why doesn't he just go full Alien X all the time?
Wiz: Well a little variety doesn't hurt right?
Plus even without his alien forms Ben is pretty clever.
And has an act for getting himself out of trouble.
Even when things get...
...really weird.
Boomstick: And he saved the universe more times than he can count.
He's defeated Vilgax when he had the power of Cthulu god.
Ended the Highbreed conspiracy.
And whooped another Celestialsapien: The Galactic Gladiator.
By flyin' so fast he created a galaxy sized black hole.
Wiz: We can tell from the size of the black hole and relation to the galaxy's in the background.
As well as how long it took to create.
That Alien X must've been flying approximately 7 quadrillion times faster than lightspeed.
Boomstick: I get it Wiz.
Alien X it's totally overpowered.
But Ben doesn't keep many of those powers as a human.
Wiz: Not much of a problem when the Omnitrix can instantly transform fast enough to catch the Big Bang.
The only thing truly holding Ben back through his hero career was his immaturity.
Being a 10 year old and all.
Boomstick: Oh yeah.
Like that one time he messed with the Omnitrix and accidentally set it to self destruct.
After chargin' up for a few days it would destroy the whole universe on its own.
So that's not great.
Wiz: Fortunately Ben grew into a reliable and wildly successful hero by the time he reached the age of 16.
He would continue his hero work into the future eventually adopting the name "Ben 10,000".
The world can rest easily with Ben 10 at his first and best line of defense.
Gwen: Sixsix and Vulkanus?
What are they doing here?
Ben: About to get their alien butts kicked.
That's what!
Goin' hero!
Wiz: Hal Jordan was just your average devilishly handsome ladies man and hotshot test pilot who discovered a crash-landed alien ship in the desert.
Okay so maybe he's not so average.
Boomstick: I'll say he found this guy Abin Sur dyin' in a crashed spaceship.
Who gave Hal a little green ring before kick in the bucket.
Wiz: And so by reciting an ancient oath Hal Jordan would become a Green Lantern.
Hal: In brightest day, in blackest night. No evil shall escape my sight, let those worship evil's might, beware my power.
Green Lantern's light!
Wiz: The Green Lantern Corps is the universe spanning law-enforcement organization founded by the immortal Malthusians.
Also known as the Guardians of the Universe.
Boomstick: Hey they're space Ompa-Loompas.
Wiz: More like Leprechauns.
Boomstick: Okay fine whichever mythical creature you want.
Wiz: No no I mean a group of them traveled to Earth centuries ago.
And literally evolve into modern day Leprechauns.
Boomstick: I knew they were real.
Wiz: Anyway the Green Lantern Corps has patrolled the known universe for three billion years.
Recruiting members of every shape and size.
Boomstick: Includin' a living planet, a sentient smallpox virus, some guy with an exploding volcano for a head, the living math equation and a squirrel.
Man even after all these years Wiz comics are weird.
Wiz: Imagine what it felt like for Hal when he began training on the Guardian homeworld Oa.
Over time he grew to be one of the cores greatest members and defender of the universe.
Boomstick: Just with that ring of his.
It might look tiny but a Mjolnir, Yoda and years of therapy have taught me anythin'.
It isn't the size that counts it's what you do with it.
Wiz: Um...
Right.
The Green Lantern Power Ring is actually one of the most impressive weapons ever made.
It's most well known for its ability to create hardened light constructs that function identically to what they're inspired by.
Anything from boxing gloves to machine guns to an entire solar system.
While a ring's wielder must be familiar with the object they're creating they don't necessarily need to know all the ins and outs for it to function.
Boomstick: The Ring's energy can boost Hal's strength and speed and also protect him with a force field.
He can shoot lasers, phase through objects, turn invisible, read minds, heal wounds and fly through space faster than light.
Wiz: The only true limit to a Power Ring's utility it's his user imagination.
In so far it's allowing the Green Lantern's bend the rules of the universe to their whim.
They can transmute matter, manipulate time, form pocket dimensions and warp the fabric of reality.
Boomstick: Even though Abin Sur went out like a bitch.
The ring makes a confident Green Lantern really tough to kill.
It has built in defenses against mind control and it can sometimes yank its owner out of harm's way all it's own.
Wiz: It can even defend against multiversal erasure events.
Like when Kilogow survived the Crisis of Infinite Earths.
Boomstick: That's right this guy tanked a freakin' redcon to the face.
Whatever in this rings I want it in my dune buggy stat.
Wiz: That would be: Pure Unfiltered Willpower.
Boomstick: Yeah how many miles does a galaghan think that--
Wiz: OKAY! Well Green Lantern's abilities stems from their own willpower.
The stronger their will is, the more the ring can do.
Boomstick: So willpower's green does that make fear brown?
Wiz: Yellow actually.
As dictated by the emotional electromagnetic spectrum.
An energy field which all emotion in the universe its arrived.
Boomstick: Kind of like the Force from Star Wars plus a rainbow of feelings.
And Hal's got more willpower bustin' out than anybody else.
Which makes him really damn powerful.
And really damn reckless.
Green Lantern: Green Lantern got this.
Wiz: His enormous power has led to his possession by Parallax.
An entity of fear and caused entire planets to fall.
But its been said knowing true fear made Hal's will even stronger than before.
Boomstick: Like when he up against this blue dickweed: Krona.
Who took control of all these space animals gods that embodid the different rainbow spectrum of emotions.
Wiz: Including Ion the green basking shark of willpower.
Yes.
I know.
Hal was able to overturn Kronos' plan which meant overpowering the literal embodiment of all willpower in the universe with his own willpower.
Bomstick: That sounds...
Impressive?
Wiz: Impossible?
Wiz and Boomstick: Impressible.
Boomstick: Hal's been knocked down through a planet.
Blasted by a supernova and punched by the reality shatterin' Superboy Prime.
Wiz: He was fast enough to fly to Earth from a planet at the edge of the universe.
And facturing how DC's observable universe it's at least 100 trillion light years in diameter.
Hal must have been flying well over 1.5 quintillion times the speed of light.
And without the Ring Hal once had to pilot a ship traveling over lightspeed manually.
As in the where planets and stars his way and Hal had to steer.
Boomstick: And since he can match the God of Willpower.
He can pull off crazy will feats other Green Lantern's had done.
Like whn Kyle Rainer held back a Big Bang.
Wiz: But to be fair the Power is not perfect.
It does carry a finite charge and should he spent too much energy too quickly.
He'll need his Power Battery to refuel.
Boomstick: Also if his opponent can ruin his willpower or even just his believe in himself.
Hal won't be able to use the ring.
Which is lame.
Wiz: Yeah these powers are pretty complex.
Batman once had a plan to trick Kyle into thinking he was blind.
And because he believed he was.
The ring reacted to his thoughts and actually made him blind.
Boomstick: But Hal's too badass to let a little sadness to take him out for good.
Hell he's got the cojones to arrest God.
But Wiz I gotta trusty yellow elephant in the room.
Why the hell are Green Lanterns weak to yellow?
Wiz: Ages ago, yes the Green Lanterns couldn't affect anything yellow because Parallax messed with their power source.
But that it's no longer the case.
So Hal isn't held back by colors.
And really that not even the worst weakness a Green Lantern ever had.
Boomstick: Oh yeah.
Way back in the day a Green Lantern went rogue and tried to takeover a planet of people with crude wooded weapons and so the great little f u.
The gods decided to make him weak to wood right before the blows started landin'.
Good thing it's not a problem for Hal.
Whether it be brightest day or blackest night all should respect the ember light of the Green Lantern.
Or he willpower you to death apparently.
Green Lantern: Give up?
Please say no.
Ten of Spades: You'll never catch me Lantern!
Green Lantern: Bang!
Wiz: All right the combatants are set.
And we've run the data through all possiblities.
Boomstick: But first...
Chad: Hey I'm Chad I play Boomstick.
Ben Singer: I'm Ben and I'm sick.
Chad: Yep.
Uh but we did wanna tell you guys about our event that we put on every year called: RTX in Austin Texas.
It's a super fun convention where we got a million things going on.
We've got video games and meets and greets and panels and sign-ins.
And lot's of fun stuff to do.
We hope you wil join us there.
Ben Singer: We can't wait to see you there.
We've got a couple of panels that we're gonna be doing.
Uh there's one on saturday.
The DEATH BATTLE one: It's time for a DEATH BATTLE.
We'd do it as often as we can.
It's always fun having you guys there.
To talk about DEATH BATTLE.
And matchups and...
Chad: Q&A.
Ben Singer: To take questions things like that.
It's great.
Uh we got a sign-in right after that.
And then on Sunday we've got our second panel.
Which is about a Secret Project we've been working on for a while now.
Can't wait to share it with you guys.
Chad: RTX it's July 5th through 7th again in Austin Texas.
Head to RTXEvent.com and hopefully will see you guys there.
Ben Singer: I promise I will not be sick.
Chad: You better not be.
Ben Singer: I hope not.
Chad: Stay away from me.
Ben Singer: It's probably a good idea.
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Ben: Huh?
Green Lantern: Hello.
Green Lantern, best looking guardian of Sector 2814, at your service.
Ben: I can give you ten good reasons right now to let me go!
Green Lantern: Sorry kid.
Seems you're carrying a Class-A galactic super-weapon.
I'll just take this.
Okay.
That's interesting.
Ben: You're not the first doofus to try to take this!
It's hero time!
Four Arms: FOUR ARMS!
Green Lantern: Lights out, Punchy!
Come on kid!
Let's stop this before it gets heated.
Heatblast: Too late!
Hey! You ever seen a supernova?
Green Lantern: Several, actually.
I...
Heatblast: Ha.
You're so lame.
I bet I can even beat you as Grey Matter.
Grey Matter: What?
I didn't mean literally.
Green Lantern: Cute.
Way Big: Eww.
I stepped in loser.
Alien X: Yawn.
This is Alien X.
He controls all of reality.
This is over.
Green Lantern: I don't care what kind of power you got.
In brightest day, in blackest night, no evil shall escape my sight, let those worship evil's might, beware my power.
Green Lantern's light!
I don't care what kind of pow--
Alien X: Reality includes time.
Green Lantern: Time huh?
Thanks for the tip.
Ben: You're not the first doofus to try and take this!
It's hero ti--
(screams)
Green Lantern: Ew. I stepped in loser.
(laughs)
(coughs)
Oh it hurts to laugh.
Don't ask.
Announcer: KO
Boomstick: Well that's another minor on our board of death.
Wiz: Ben's absurb versatility and ingenuity put a stellar fight.
But Hal had the tools and skills needed to ensure victory.
Boomstick: Well the Omnitrix is millions of aliens and its just nuts.
He can only ever use one at a time.
While Hal always has access to all of his powers.
Wiz: Even with the flexibility of Master Control this meant Ben was always playing catch-up not a great position to be in considering Green Lantern's might.
Boomstick: Ben's Diamondhead form was tough sure but he wasn't survivin' a planet explodin' in his face.
XLR8 was wicked fast, but not fast enough to cross the universe in an hour and Way Big was really strong but he didn't hit as hard as a supernova.
Wiz: Hal simply outclassed all of Ben's options except for one.
Boomstick: Yeah how the hell did Hal beat Alien X?
That thing is basically omnipotent.
Wiz: Well not exactly Celestialsapiens are extremely powerful.
But they can beaten in battle and have failed in the past like the time Alien X recreated the universe.
He only did that because he couldn't stop it from being destroyed in the first place.
Alien X could definitely match a lot of Hal's power.
But Hal had defenses against all of X's.
Mind control?
The ring protects Hal's head.
Mess with time?
Hal can do that too.
Tryin' to wipe him from existance?
Please Green Lantern can survive an entire universe being erased.
Wiz: Likewise Alien X has never shown any defenses against the same kinds of things that Hal could replicate.
Like mind control, transmutation and time manipulation.
Ben and his alien forms put up a great fight and Alien X is easily one of the most powerful combatants we've ever seen on DEATH BATTLE!
However Hal had the speed, versatility and literal willpower neccesary to claim his victory.
Boomstick: Guess you could say Hal is definitely the ringer for this fight.
Wiz: (groans)
Boomstick: Aw Wiz don't be green with envy that pun was 10 out of Ben.
Wiz: The winner is Green Lantern.
Sam I'm Sam, He's Luis.
And neither of us are Wiz and Boomstick.
But don't go anywhere just yet because we're about to announce the next matchup.
Luis: And if you want the battle music you can click the download link below.
