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The Journey So Far

Publishing-in-support-of,

EDUCREATION PUBLISHING

RZ 94, Sector \- 6, Dwarka, New Delhi - 110075

Shubham Vihar, Mangla, Bilaspur, Chhattisgarh - 495001

Website: www.educreation.in

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All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form by any means, electronic, mechanical, magnetic, optical, chemical, manual, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior written consent of its writer.

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Printed in India

The Journey   
So Far

An Inspirational Tale of Hope, Love & Life

S

EDUCREATION PUBLISHING   
(Since 2011)  
www.educreation.in

wapan Karmakar

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'This is a story of Believing in Hope'

'This is a story for Believers'

#Get Inspired & Stay Focused#

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For everything that had happened in the past, for everything that is relaying in the present:

-there ought to be a reason, there ought to be a lesson.

-an arrow is shot only by pulling it backwards. When hard times in life pulls you back-compose yourself, be calm, be focused, and keep aiming. Time will then launch you into greater targets in life. Remember; Universe conspires, only to launch us into happiness and greater targets in life no matter what.

#For the challenges thrown to us by life, this Universe conspires, only to destine ourselves towards happiness.

Get Inspired. Believe in Hope. Stay Focused #

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Dedicated To My Beloved Friend

"Late Ms. PIYALI DAS"

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The Prologue

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I never aspired to be a full time writer nor do I wish to. I always wanted to write that ONE story. The stories were always there right around me; some of them were finished tales while some other with an unfinished touch.

Not everyone has the courage to rewrite their past no matter how painful it was. Not everyone can regather, learn from their past and with focus, can build a blessed present.

Here I am, writing what I can ever write in my life time. It's not a fiction, it's not a reel of an upcoming movie, it may be not supreme but each story is from real-life experience, each character is someone you may know from your life.

Each of my tales is to touch your heart, for you to learn something from, for you to fall in love with the characters. I want you to connect with these characters, cherish your own childhood as you read through the stories.

I want you to find yourself in these journeys-the days of happiness, days of struggle, world of love, world of fear and the mistakes made and then the inspirations which kept you going. I want you to find yourself, in each character and someday to tell your close ones about "Your Journey So Far".

It's in fact the journey of self and few of my friends with whom somehow I lost touch after schooling but then the characters have started to meet each other by the time I turned 36 and it seems we are connected well to each other in an unbounded pattern.

For now, it's about..... The Journey So Far!

* * *
Part 1

W

'3rd Dec, 2016'....

"Air India announces, rescheduling of its flight AI-549 from Chennai to Port Blair due to technical reason and the new departure time is 09:30am."

'Having reached the Chennai Domestic Terminal at around 3AM, this delay of exactly 4hours and 45minutes meant it was going to be dull day for me.'

'I don't like these flight delays at all, especially when I am on a business trip, I never like it.'

'However nothing was in my control except the fact that I could control expressing my anger to some staff of Air India.'

My colleague Ipshita looked rouge after this announcement. 'This is disgusting-she said, getting irritated by the delay.'

'Take a seat and relax, Ipshita'- I replied trying to calm her.

'Let's have a cup of coffee and burger'-Ipshita replied.

So, we two went to the coffee shop near the Gate 3 inside the terminal.

The weather was quite pleasant outside but the inside buzzed with lots of travellers waiting for their boarding.

'Hey SK! Do you see that guy standing at the 'Coffee Day', doesn't he look familiar?'-Ipshita asked me pointing towards the man, dressed in Black-n-Checks, sipping his coffee while he conversed with couple of staffs from the Indigo Airline.

'Oh yes, you are right. He looks very familiar'-I replied to her and took out my cell phone and searched through the friend list of facebook account.

'Shubham, my childhood classmate and now FB friend, as I recall his facebook profile that has all the photos from our young school days'- I told Ipshita.

"Yes there he is....Shubham! In my FB list. Let's go and meet him"- I urged Ipshita.

While we had our shares of burger, I told Ipshita, "You know dear, when I look up to Shubham I feel that he deserves everything he has now on the professional front."

"He is one of the well known and respected faces in the airline industry."

"Neither is he a business tycoon nor some egoistic rude top management boss."

"He is one of his rarest prototype, admired by everyone he has met in his life so far and inspiration to many of us during our days of struggle for getting a job and career, very helping he was and a guy to share our secrets."

'But whatever he has achieved in the present wasn't a cake walk for him.'

'He has overcome so many hardships in the past to become what he is today.'

'Is it so, SK? Then you must tell me his story someday.'-Ipshita felt anxious to know more about Shubham.

'I have an idea, SK!'- Ipshita said.

'What idea?'

"Why don't you write about Shubham's journey in your novel?"

'Wow Ipshita! That would be great'. –I thanked and assured her that she will learn about his inspirational journey to success soon.

'But I hardly knew anything about him in detail.'

'This was a chance I didn't want to let go waste.'

'We finished eating in next ten minutes and started to walk towards Shubham who was then sitting on the chair near to Gate 7.'

'He was tapping his mobile every now & then, looked quite unusual to me.'

'As far as I remember he disliked being glued to cell phones.'

'Hi Shubham!'... How are you?

"O hi! Nice surprise, SK. It's so nice to see you here. After a long time, finally we meet out of facebook pages ha!"

'Although we had us, on each other's facebook friend list, we never had any chats in past two years.'

'The clock ticks so fast, doesn't it?'

'Shubham!' Meet Ipshita, my colleague.

'Hi Ipshita!'-he greeted.

'Great to see you Shubham sir. I have heard about you from SK'.-Ipshita replied.

"So? How come you have been in Chennai, Shubham? And you still travel a lot?"-I asked.

Pointing to the lady who was sitting next to him, he said, "SK, meet Avni-my wife and Nirvaan- my son. This time I was here for a minor surgery for Avni".

Namaste Bhabi! Hi Nirvaan!

"What about you, SK?" -Shubham asked.

'I? For my usual industry training plus I am planning to venture into book-publishing-printing business. So I was here to meet some of the publishing houses. We both got a week leave and our company has sponsored a leisure-trip to the Islands'-I replied.

'I and Shubham did our young schooling days together for few years and now we belong to the Airline Industry in India.'

'It's been almost ten years I know him but not enough.'

'He was my mentor at the RedHat Academy during the RedHat Training Program in 2005.'

'He has been inspirational for me and I always believed that there is an untold story behind this inspirational man.'

'Well Shubham, I must tell, you look the same person as you were then in school. You never changed for friends. You did great to keep up friendship with everyone. You are the only string who kept all friends tied together'-I thanked Shubham. He is still in touch with most of the ex-classmates.

'Thanks SK!'-he said.

"By the way, which flight are you boarding?"

Well, the delayed Air India -he said.

'Oh great, we too.'-I replied.

'SK, would you like to give me a company to the book shop?' I have to buy some books.

'Sure Shubham.' I will.

While Ipshita and Avni took their seats and started chatting, I and Shubham took a walk towards the book shop near Gate 10.

As we marched slowly, I asked Shubham, "So you have become Mr. Traveller, you interact with so many people, don't you?"

'Yeah, sort of'-he nodded in approval.

I was keen to write about him in 'The Journey So Far' and this was my chance to get everything extracted from him.

But if I asked him directly about his past life, he would have felt awkward.

'It seems you are fond of Chennai, isn't it true Shubham? Quite amazing, instead of a Bong Connection, you have a Chennai connection'.

Shubham laughed and said, "I never had a Bong connection and Chennai is like a second home for me.

Lots of friends from different fields of work, lots of young schooldays friends and I have a special bonding to this place".

'I learnt, that Shubham loves to explore. Explore the people rather than places, loves to interact with people from different walks of life, from different parts of state, country and religion.'

'He loves to explore about their thinking process, their experiences in life.'

'When he travelled for a business trip, airport lounges became his favorite place to explore-the air travellers. Loads of people, some tied to their smartphones as if they are the most techie guys in this world, some glued to the beauties out there, some talking the long walk with their children, some with their eyes stuck at the flight schedules, some wishing their flight was on time, some rushing from the washrooms as there has been announcements for them that their flight was about to leave and some like Shubham, who never wanted to leave the terminal and wished the flights were just delayed and delayed.'

We had still three hours to board the flight.

We started discussing about things related to our work as he searched some latest Novels in the book shop.

I asked Shubham-"I don't understand one thing; you were far batter student in school. You could have completed your engineering and got a highly paid job. But you chose the other way. Why? Is Avni, the same girl-your childhood friend? Actually I don't remember that girl's name. Which company are you working right now?"

On hearing all this, Shubham took a deep breathe and said that he was working with two of the leading Airline Companies in India, has his own Firm which works as PSA to those airlines. But at the same time he starts to avoid replying for my remaining questions....he kept his silence.

Then he said, "SK, Avni is not that girl, not my childhood friend.I got married to her five years back."

'He has married someone else and not that girl with whom he fell in love during the college days?'

'I was shocked at his revelations later.'

'When he later revealed his story, I learnt if anyone was to be his better-half, Avni was the perfect one.'

'Avni is his blessed present.'

'You were of a great help during RedHat India Exams.'

'It's because of you I managed to get the job I desperately needed that time.'

'I feel really happy for you when top brasses from our fraternity talk and praise about you.'- I appreciated his dedication he puts in his work.

My anxiousness to know about him was making him feel bit uneasy and inexpressible for unknown reasons rather known reason that I mentioned "that girl". He could sense, whom I was asking about.

To make the mood lighter for him, I said, "No issues if you don't want to share the rest...just relax."

'You like reading novels?' - I asked Shubham

'Well, I am not a big fan of Novels but sometimes it's good to get some inspiration from them.' – He said.

'Interesting! Will you read, if I write one?'

'Actually I am writing one and thought it would be best if I write down the real stories which can inspire others.'

'To be true and frank, an hour ago, Ipshita suggested me to start with your story.'

'Would you like to share if you feel comfortable with it?'

'Tell me about your journey so far, dear.'

Shubham didn't respond immediately.

He kept searching the racks for novels. He picked one and said, "Do you know this author, SK?"

'Which author?'

'Savi Sharma.'

'I have heard about her. She is the new sensation in literary world.' – I replied.

'Oh I see!'

This novel, it says "Everyone has a story", looks quite interesting.

'I must read it'-Shubham replied.

I don't know what he was thinking while he purchased the novel and read the first chapter.

Turning to me he said, "I too was thinking to write a story but I am not a good writer. In that case, you get the story"-Shubham replied ultimately giving a nod.

'You will feel comfortable sharing your past and the journey till now?'

For seconds he thought and then nodded in approval.

"That's great! Well in that case, tell me everything in detail. I want to start with your story"-I appreciated his gesture.

'Not many have the courage to relive and rewrite their past.'

'Here was a man, who had gone through so many storms in his past and still so composed, focused and down to earth.'

'Sure I will, once we reach the islands'- an optimistic Shubham replied. But right now let's enjoy the Airport environment.

'Ok done!' –he said and we continued discussing lots of issues prevailing in the Travel Industry and about the islands.

I requested the cabin crew for a seat change so that I can talk to Shubham. Ipshita luckily got the seat next to Avni.

Our flight took off on time after the delay. 2 hours journey felt like two days as my other side was eager to know and write about Shubham. Impatiently, I asked him, "what all had you done after XII std?"

'Well, nothing much-dropped out of college, did a joke of correspondence course but anyhow managed to perform well, worked in few IT companies and then became an Entrepreneur'-he replied.

'Shubham; The Entrepreneur, the Poet, the RedHat Guru and what not?'

'You have got so many skills.'

'You remember any special moments from any of you air travel?'-I asked Shubham.

I was trying to mould him into the story telling mode.

To my luck, he started to open up and he already sensed it that I was actually wanting him to disclose his stories.

He said, "You don't have to set me up SK. Let's begin and you better get these noted."

And that is how I came to know that, by the time Shubham turned 25 & later 36 this year, he had seen lots of highs and lows in his life- both in personal and professional part.

Those who left him by letting him down came back in his life at a point of no-return for him.

Time can change many things in one's life drastically. I realized as I read through every story of his journey later.

* * *
Part 2

W

"The Air travel, 2009"

'There was rush at the Chennai International airport.'

'Counters were getting filled in like the flood water.'

'I was dressed in black & light-blue formals, rolling my vision around the lounge and then my eyes scanned on a lady dressed in Pink top and blue Levis jeans- impatient to move towards the baggage screening.'

'I kept my eyes on her for an unexplained reason for a minute or two...then turned back towards the long queue for my turn to snatch the boarding pass.'

'A moment later, suddenly someone hits me from the back.'

'When noticed, I found the lady whom I was giving stares a moment back.'

'I understood that she ran to the check-in counter and in the process slipped onto me standing in the line with a backpack that looked packed with treasures of my belongings.'

'Careful Mam!'-Sighting her discomfort, I advised politely and gripped her hand to lift her up.

She stared at me for a minute as if she knew me in the past.

'Shubham was recollecting; is she the same traveller whom I helped to board her first ever air journey four years back?'

'As I approached to ask her name, her eyes had already noticed the ID card I was clipping on to my front pocket of the shirt, which read my name.'

'My brain was messy, to recollect her name as I comfort her to stand and move towards the counter to collect my boarding and approach the departure gate.'

By the time, she might have thought to speak further to me, I had moved on to security area and was quite nervous, this time to catch this lady as if my senses were telling me, "you know her who she is".

'I hardly noticed her anywhere in the crowded hall thereafter.'

'My heart wished, she boarded the same flight which I was about to travel.'

'Soon the bus arrived as if to take all souls to a heavenly journey.'

'Greeted by the cabin crew, I searched for my seat that read 13A on the boarding pass; 13A again?'

'Everytime I board a flight that's the seat by default for me.'

'But this time, it turned lucky.'

'After adjusting my cabin bag, as I conquered my seat to put the seat belt on, I turned to my right to surprise myself.'

'Hey Purnima?'-as I recollected her name and spoke greeted her. So here you are again.

'Sorry!' Do I know you sir? -She asked with a gentle tone.

'Well, you don't remember me it seems.' I am Shubham, the air-traveller.–I reintroduced myself.

'Oh yes yes, I vaguely recognize.

You had helped me on my first air travel four years back at this airport'--with her memories intact, Purnima greets me.

And then she talks endless; I am so sorry, don't mind about me not recognizing you at once. So, how are you doing? And what's the purpose this time, Mr. air-traveller? --she asked as we exchanged smiles.

'As far as I remember- last time you were travelling after a tragic incident, in 2005, which you had narrated to me then, during our 2hrs encounter.'

'You were feeling very low and I could feel the guilt you had that time within yourself.'

You had said, "I won't be the same person again, my life will change hereafter."

'Anyways, I hope you have overcome it.'

'If there was any devil side of mine, it would have shut her mouth up for digging the past. But I wondered how well she remembered about our first meeting and more amusing...about the incident I told her.'

'On my return trip from Chennai after the RedHat Exams in 2005, I had met Purnima- a typical South Indian girl-5feet 2inches tall-fair enough-extrovert, travelling for the first time by flight.'

'She wasn't aware of the boarding procedures.'

'I knew her parents but not Purnima in person. She then became my very good friend and we were in touch for one year only.'

'Purnima inquired-Shubham, what was her name... aa .. ..aaaa....Piyali right?'

'Yes, Purni--Piyali it was, I replied taking a deep breath as I felt tears were about to flood me again and.... she went silent for a moment noticing me.'

'Tell me then Shubham, about your Journey So Far?' Purnima asked as if she was travelling for the purpose of only listening to me.

'It has been sort of ups n downs since then. But the best part is going to be my marriage in a year or two'-I reverted, with a feel of ease in my thoughts.

'That's great news dear! I would like to know, what happened all these years after 2005?'-Purnima asks as if to quench a thirst inside her.

'No no, leave all this. Tell, about your journey dear'- I replied frantically.

'Well I got married a year back, work as a software developer, husband too in the IT company and we are now settled in Madurai. I was here to meet my parents. So far it has been good.' -Purnima replied.

'20mins disappeared within seconds and I was feeling real hungry as the cabin crew announced to serve refreshments.'

'What would you like to have Purni?'

'A sandwich n a cup of coffee dear; she urged.'

'Oh great, me too!'

As the airhostess approached us to serve, "Purnima gave a nasty sweet look and ordered me, "can you please answer my question I raised?".

Taking a deep breathe and hiding every pain he carried, Shubham said-"yes sure" and he briefed Purnima about his journey so far.

'Purni, two years after Piyali left, I got a full time Technical trainer job in an IT firm. Then switched to another company this for few months however I had some health concerns and then resigned.'

'I have started working with a Travel Company recently and trying to establish myself in a better way.'

'At the start of this year I met this girl; Avni.'

'We like each other's company.'

'She is working in a government office in the city. At first instance of our meeting or call it a date, I dared to ask her for marriage. By 2011 we have decided to get married.'

'Oh great Shubham!' However I am a bit confused about your marriage part.'

'Oh yes! You liked someone else I guess?'-Purnima asked.

Shubham looks out of the window in the clouds and a bit lost in his own thoughts as Purnima continues to enjoy her in-flight refreshments.

Shubham was hiding a lot more than he briefed Purnima. He would not open up to everybody so easily.

Purnima knuckles him up on his forehead, "What happened Shubham, is everything fine?". You don't seem happy answering me.

Very slowly with his head down, he whispered, "I don't want to tell anything more right now. May be next time, may be never."

'As the flight took a sharp right turn, it went turbulent and his memories were shaken up flashing by bits and pieces and ran through his heart, crushing and bruising.'

What was it that Shubham was unwilling to speak out?

As I later came to know from his past, that he had lost his Mom & Piyali in his life forever.

Was it a grudge in him or was his life so emotionally twisted by their untimely death or was it something else?

By August 2005, Shubham moved to Chennai for completing his major IT training. By Dec,2005 he returned to his hometown. He joined a small IT

training company to work as a trainer. In the meantime his search for someone had begun in despair.

Not many of us knew about the Piyali incident in his life. Shubham never told anybody not even to his best friend except Dev and Jeet, who were his close friends and strange enough to Purnima too.

His best friend Sekher was on-job training for one year then.

I came to know that incident during the days of writing this book

'We touched down at the Veer Savarkar International Airport at 11.45am.'

'As we were waiting to collect our baggage, I requested Shubham to meet me at the Hotel Sinclairs; we were supposed to check-in so that I can learn about the rest of his story.'

'I and Ipshita left for the Hotel and Shubham with family to his home.'

'We finished our city tour the same day.'

'By evening, I and Ipshita were enjoying the raindrops as slight drizzle had started to pour in.'

As we relaxed in the lobby of the hotel, Ipshita said, "So SK, you got your story?"

'Yes, just began to write.'

'Ipshita read through the first part quickly and urged me to call Shubham for the lunch next day.'

The plan was to get more out of him. There were so many questions tormenting my mind.

'The next day; the weather was stormy but Shubham managed to reach our Hotel well ahead of the lunch.'

'We made ourselves comfortable at the restaurant

for the round table conference-the hotel had one. The Lunch was served.

'What's the story about you and Piyali?'– I asked Shubham sympathetically hoping that he won't get hurt.

'That's another chapter in my life.'

'First Mom left us when I was fifteen and then Piyali, the friend who changed my vision towards life-an everlasting symbol of friendship, love and sacrifice was she.'

'Sometimes we don't value the worth of someone until they become memories.'

'Her absence added value to my life more than her presence.'

'I will take your leave now, SK & Ipshita. I have some pending queries from my clients.'

'Rest of the story-I shall send you in email.'

'Keep me informed once you are back from the Havelock tour.'

'Don't forget to enjoy the adventure sports there.'-guiding us about reaching Havelock, he then left for his office.

Four days to go, lot of stuffs to finish-my mind aced against time as I relaxed for the morning tea at the Havelock Beach Island Resort.

They have provided a free Wi-Fi so I could go through the important emails quickly.

As I scrolled through the emails and found the one from Shubham.

Shubham finally started to email me mentioning in detail about his past and present, about his journey so far.

* * *
Part 3

W

"Piyali-the untold affair"

It was in April 2004. He was getting ready for the morning batch at Tata-InfoTech; the students at the training center were eagerly waiting for the first ever seminar.

He sipped through his coffee, while turning the pages of his technical guide.

He was anxious, his heart started beating furiously.

A ring on his cell-phone diverts his attention towards the unknown caller.

Reluctant to pick he disconnects.

He reached his training centre, the seminar went well, there were applauds in the room.

The seminar was a grand success.

This was Shubham's first attempt for an interview for a part timer job in the field of Information Technology.

By 5pm, he turns his attention on the messages on his cell phone, and there it was, the morning caller had left a message, "If you remember Piyali, your schoolmate, then please rush as soon as you receive this message."

"Piyali; her vitals are very serious. You must go and see her family once."

While he reads this, the success of the seminar didn't mean anything to him anymore.

Shubham has no idea, who was the messenger and what was happening suddenly but he is not a guy who forgets his friends easily.

He knew Piyali and her family however he was not in touch with them for the past three years.

Without wasting any time he heads for Piyali's home with great deal of fear- the caller had text him the address too.

On the way, his cell phone rang again, this time to be told by Piyali's younger sister Pihu, what actually was the chaos about.

"With a chocked voice and crying profusely, Pihu informed; Shubham da, Piya di had met a major accident at the airport in Chennai. She was taken to hospital. Maa spoke to one of the doctor over call and it did not sound good at all."

'Piyali' was his batch mate from XI std.

'A 5 feet 4 inch tall-milky white face-golden black eyes-brownish long hair till waist-simple-beautiful girl with a positive aura, who talked very little.'

'She was shy talking to boys.'

'Her smile would render life of fresh air to many in the school but her heart was never invaded by anyone, except the 5feet 7inches-tall-dusky-thin n lean boy who was studious, hard working, humorous and emotional at times, trustworthy, diligent, and moreover he never stared a girl, the other way.'

'He held himself to high standards for the way he spoke and behaved.'

'He always had high moral values.'

'On the other side, Piyali was very sober and authentic girl. She was true to her rare friends and never used them for selfish reasons.'

'And then to his surprise, the younger sister Pihu begs him not to visit their home. 'Shubham's brain could not work out the reason behind this.'

'In a very dejected state, he wandered for an hour around his training center and the park nearer to college.'

A day later...

A call from the same unknown number woke up Shubham at around 5 AM. Shubham picks up as soon as he heard it ringing.

'Hi Shubham!' Extremely sorry to disturb you at this time.

'Who is it?'-he asked!

'I am Diya, Piyali's friend and roommate from the hostel.'

Diya was Piyali's only roommate. Diya was doing her internship in Paramedics while Piyali was into PG Media & Mass Communication. They shared same room as paying guest.

Shubham wakes up from the den, he slept uneasy the whole night.

'Ok, hi!'-Is she stable now? What are the surgeons saying, Diya?-he goes on querying...

Suddenly, Diya fires at Shubham like anything with piercing questions----"why are you so bothered now Shubham? You were never bothered about her feelings. Am I right or wrong?"

Shubham was getting annoyed inside with the fumed tone of Diya.

He could only resist a bit but not for long.

'What are you talking about Ms. Diya? I have no idea.'—he fired back.

'Didn't you realize, she liked you from day one, you too were friends? Were you not aware she was too a shy and conservative girl to be anybody's friend accept you. How could you not understand all this, Shubham?'-Diya speaks out in frustration, that Shubham, then started to feel it was obvious.

'Ah Diya!' But I never eyed her with such a feeling.

'In fact if she knew me, I was not at all talkative or that frank with any girl in schooldays.'

'My values never let me indulge in looking a girl in that way.'

'I believed that school was such a pious institution to involve in affairs with anybody.'

'So you were that much busy in studies, you had your eyes closed about Piyali, huh? And by the by, you don't know that she fell in love with you straight after schooling?'--Diya freaks out at Shubham.

'Diya, it's today, that I came to know from you. You believe me or not, it's a truth!'--as Shubham replies, he sunk into the sea of regrets. It appeared as a crime he had done in past and was now getting the bitter punishment.

Diya continued; I am not here to scold you Shubham, but Piyali always liked and loved you and only you. It's very hard to believe that a beautiful and soft spoken girl like her will never have a friend or a boyfriend for that matter. Ironically it's true.

'You were her only friend, the best may be. She would always speak good things about you when we got a leisure time at room.'

'Not a single day has passed for Piyali without talking about you.'

'She was madly in love with you dear and I could see that she was broken too.'

'She knew you will never come up first to accept, had she told you in school.'

'She was waiting for the right time but the right time never came through.'

'A month back, when her sister informed, that you were very sick of the heart ailment and had been to Chennai twice for treatment, she then decided to go and see you.'

'She bought the flight tickets a week back and was about to travel yesterday but she met this tragic incident.'

'Hold on for a second Diya!'-how did her family managed to get my contact details and specifically about my ailment?

'Is it hard to get anybody's whereabouts in the city back there in the islands? It's a small place by the way, I know.'

'And those who really care for us, they find every means to get to us...isn't it?'

'You are not more than a silent killer Shubham, you will repent on this.'

'You.............!'-Diya Menon yelled louder as she cried and hung up the call.

Three Days after the Accident...

The Funeral-18Apr2004

Situation turned ugly for Shubham the day when Piyali's coffin was brought to her home in the Islands.

Pihu-the younger sister of Piyali, had text him to be at their home by 11.15. The message read-"Shubham da, be at our home by 11.15, Piya di has come".

As he gets to her home, the huge gathering surrounding her home makes his discomfort.

His senses were telling him that he was about to hear something very tragic, his heart and mind pretending that his instincts were wrong-that the race against life has come to an end for Piyali.

'As he enters closer to main door, he starts to fall apart, his feet resists to move an inch and his mind cluttered with series of queries.'

His mind racing and him thinking, "It was only four nights back, we spoke. You were almost reaching there, you were supposed to take the subway, you told me that you were alright, then how did it happen, how?"

With queries unanswered, He approached her body that was wrapped in white, rested, calm as ever, the face glowing in the sunshine as if a beautiful piece of art has been painted fresh depicting a deathbed.

'He held her hand, wanting to feel her one last time.'

'The unexplainable grief is so strong, he wonders why is he losing his loved ones one by one.'

'He closes his eyes as he feels the complete darkness, the uneasiness; he struggles to breathe in his sorrow.

Piyali's sister utters out of pain, "life isn't going to be the same for him from here on."

As the relatives, lifted Piyali's body for the funeral rituals, her mother and sister burst heavily in tears.

'A mother lost her most beloved belonging.'

'No words can explain the pain she went through that moment.'

'And there was Shubham-he could only watch the funeral procession receding, with tears in his eyes his soul felt an immense emptiness.'

'He could not gather the courage to see her body being consumed by the fire.'

He stayed there until the sunset when Pihu went to him in anger and said, "Leave, we don't want to see you again in our life....you are a murderer."

His heart sunk, his feet trembled as he took his exit.

Time travels, people change, life takes drastic turns sometimes for good sometimes for worse but for everything which has happened in this time there ought to be a reason and there ought to be a lesson.

He knew straightaway, he had mistaken Piyali's love as a casual friendship during schooldays.

'The dearth he felt was more than the depth of an ocean.'

'Indeed!' It was an untold affair.

'Piyali had never given him a single hint of her feelings to Shubham.'

But why didn't she express her love for Shubham, ever?

'Nobody, including Shubham could ever know how silently and deep she liked and loved him.'

'It was only when Diya revealed that Piyali would always talk about his health status and the things happening in his life more than she discussed about the subjects she studied in college lectures.'

'She never had any boyfriend in college, nor did she ever interact with anyone else that frankly as she did with Shubham in the entire school.'

'Once she finished her Senior Secondary schooling she disappeared in a blind hope without letting Shubham know about her feelings, only hoping that someday he would understand and bring her back.'

"How could he understand Piyali?" Shubham was impatiently searching for his first love then which wasn't her.

For all these years, Shubham held himself responsible for Piyali's tragic incident.

'His tears would gulp inside throat as he swallowed every blame he could take.'

He just kept sinking with only one question in mind, "Why to Piyali? How could this?"

* * *
Part 4

W

The Accident--13April, 2004

'So how did this tragic accident happen?'-I desperately needed the answer and I knew Shubham will break his core if he revealed that part.

It was only left to one person then; Purnima had the answer.

So I dropped a message on her facebook messenger on the last day of my stay in the islands and after three days of wait Purnima replied with whatever she could iterate from the year April, 2005 when Shubham met Purnima for the first time and told this which Diya Menon had narrated, a day after Piyali's Funeral.

"On hearing from her sister that Shubham was going through a long illness due to his mitral valve ailment, Piyali could not resist herself planning to meet Shubham who was back in the islands. She called up Shubham at around 7.40 pm, on that fateful night".

'Hello!' Is that you Shubham?

'Yes Mam'-he replied as dull as he was very tired after having taken three consecutive training batches.

'You recognize me, my voice?' -Piyali wished he would guess it right.

Sadly, it turned negative.

'Nope!' Sorry I didn't.-Shubham replied.

'Oh ...you forgot me na?' - This must had been demoralizing for Piyali and to make it worse, Shubham hung up the call.

Few minutes later, she called again..."hey you! I am Piyali".

'Ok but I don't recognize you mam' -Shubham was so tired, he wished this could be last headache he wanted that day to end off.

'Listen Piyali mam, can you please tell me who exactly are you and who gave you, my number?'-an angry Shubham finally blasted her off.

Piyali was shattered a bit...she was silent for a minute, as Shubham held the line waiting for a reply.

As Piyali gathers courage to reply.... something struck in Shubham's mind...and then Shubham almost yells out--"Oh o...I m sorry...its Piyali Das -11th RBV Arts, right?

I am sorry dear...it's you ...how could I be such a fool, not recognizing your voice....don't mind. I am so tired after a long training schedule."

'Never mind, dear' -Piyali ignores his partial dementia but she felt happy.

'So, whats up Piyali? You disappeared like the extinct species'-Shubham asked as he felt happy to be talking to his ex-schooldays batchmate.

'First tell me, how is your health? Are you taking your meds regularly for the mvps?' -a much concerned Piyali inquires him.

'I am coming to the islands in a day or two...I want to meet you.'

Shubham was taken aback by the information Piyali had about his ailment and the health stats....and to know the answer he asked Piyali...

"Who told you, I am unwell and about the mvps".

'Although Shubham's mpvs-a mild ailment of heart, wasn't serious, but Piyali used to get scared by the thought of someone having a heart ailment has she lost her father due to similar ailment of the heart.'

'It's not important, who told me...instead tell me, are you feeling well now?'

'Listen, I am coming to meetmy family and will see you too'-Piyali never wanted to let him know her actual purpose, else Sbubham would have advised not to travel for a silly reason.

Piyali converses for next two minutes.-'I am starting from my room. Will reach by 11pm to thirusulam station, will get down and take the subway and check-in at the airport by 11.30pm probably'---and then Piyali bids a goodnight to Shubham for that moment.

On that fateful night, as Piyali reached the Thirusulam station-opposite to Chennai International Airport, by train. She found the subway closed for repairing work.

Piyali had turned brave and bold enough to travel at night in Chennai.

It was around 11.20 at night.

The only option left for Piyali was to cross the highway in front of airport to get to the other side.

Crossing that highway was too risky at night...vehicles were driven furiously at above 100kmph.

Piyali was waiting at the edge of road opposite to the Airport terminal, so that once the road cleared off trucks and busses, she would cross.

In few minutes, she found there were lesser heavy vehicles. One or two probably at around 200mts distance. So she decided to cross the broad highway.

But her trolley-bag got stuck in the sands alongside the road. She turned around and lifted the trolley and again turned right quickly, to cross the road.

Sadly, one of the mini-van loaded heavily with cargo had gained momentum by then and Piyali's judgment for crossing the road without noticing it properly, went completely wrong.

....and then,

'Bang!' The mini-van had hit her by the time it applied the brakes in full.

The vehicles stopped, the witnesses there gathered her damaged trolley and the handbag she carried from a few meters from the spot and without waiting for any ambulance took her to the nearest hospital.

Somebody was quick enough to find her cell phone that she had kept inside the trolley instead of the handbag. That person had called up the number that read "Friend for Emergency".

It was Diya's number.

Diya who had fallen asleep by 11 pm, received the call on second time when her cell rang.

She was shocked and in panic.

But she was a paramedic too.

She advised the caller to press the bleeding spots hard with some cloth and guided them to the Traumacare hospital 8kms away from the airport.

Diya left her hostel in no time, leaving a message to her warden about the accident and to Piyali's sister to call back.

At around 12:15 AM, Piyali was admitted to the Trauma center.

'She was in very bad shape.'

'She looked disintegrated.'

'The impact from the front meant she had succumbed to serious injuries on forehead and chest.'

'Her right collar bone, the femur and her right arm were all fractured. She was bleeding profusely.'

'Diya reached the hospital at around 12.55AM. As she was a paramedic intern, she could sneak into the OT where surgeons were trying hard for Piyali's survival but the vitals were just not good enough then.'

'At around 08 AM, doctors have shifted her to the Surgical ICU. Piyali was wrapped in bandages everywhere as if a woman hasn't lost her husband but was forced to wear the white saree forever.'

'Piyali was lying immovable and senseless in the ICU fighting with the cruel time that was never to be defeated.'

'Piyali would have never imagined in her worst dreams, that one day her anxiety, love and care for the person she loved the most will distant her away from him.'

'As Diya wiped her tears every now and then, doctors consoled her.'

'They did whatever they could. The senior surgeon had mentioned Diya; Call her family, she can anytime...leave us.'

'Diya broke down on the floor as she howled.'

At times, Time treats us like a butcher's knife. 'No Mercy at all'.

* * *

Part 5

W

From Piyali's Diary

'It's eight months now we joined XI std in a government school named RBV and I have only one genuine friend, the best amidst all-my Shubham!'

'Some DNA within me has strange issue of not making friends but it's like a mystery how he became my only boy-friend after he joined RBV.'

'Like every great friendship starts from schooldays and every true love stories starts from the most unexpected places, so as mine.'

'The friendship started from our few minutes of encounter under the Scooter Shed of RBV when the rear of my Scooty hit him on his knee as an attempt to pull it out by me and he was too modest to react.'

'And whenever we met under the shed after the school hours to avoid being noticed by others, our friendship has matured.'

'He is the best in Chemistry in the entire batch.'

'However, he does not share any chemistry with me yet.'

'For others he is a boring studious creature.'

Today, I was on stage for the assembly. It was 11th 'Art's" turn to conduct the assembly for the week. That includes quote of the day, news reading and the National Anthem. Students were slowly gathering in the prayer-ground.

'I went to get the sign of the school leader as a confirmation for assembly conduction.'

'Instead, I saw Shubham inside the music room.'

Our P.E.T has sent him to collect the Drum.

'Instead he picks up a flute, stares at it as if that was his lost property and smiles. He was singing at just audible voice, one of my favourite old Hindi songs.'

'I was amazed!'

'Amazed at his beauty.'

'He appeared like lord Krishna holding the flute, just getting ready to play that flute in the banks of Yamuna.'

I knew I was imagining what could never be the reality as far as I considered me with Shubham but I couldn't help it.

'When he opened his eyes with a heart piercing smile of his, I had no choice but adore him.'

I hope he didn't get me doing that.

'He signaled me to come closer.'

'I went mesmerized.'

'Has it ever happened in the history that a boy can be so amazingly beautiful to a girl?'

'He is just fair enough, thin and lean, breathtakingly handsome, extremely good in every subject except love and unknowingly the reason of my life.'

'I feel all the pure emotions flowing in me.'

'I can feel him as my own cute little baby, the ever wanting charming prince, my dream boy, a lovely husband, a caring friend, a responsible father, a truthful companion, god given soul mate.'

'I am always matured enough to know, understand, and feel. But when it comes to him, I feel lost. I feel pity for myself. Pity?'

Shubham was reading my face and he seemed happy to see me lost. I asked him to quickly rush to the assembly but with a mischievous smile he turned his back on me and started walking, ignoring me.

I don't know why but I followed him without even thinking where he was going.

We went to the 1st floor, to a small PT room that stores few recently brought drums and some stage decoration items.

He stopped and stood facing me. His tall-slender- perfectly sculpted physical form seized me.

'The time stood there. It was a magic.'

'I felt his rhythmic heart beats, his warm breath across my face from an angle due to his height, a magical bond held me to him. Blood was rushing to my brain.'

"Why are you following me..."-he demanded!

'Ha, what?' I need the sign of school leader- I was out of reasons to reply.

'I am not the leader, don't you know?' OK, breathe easy...you are not breathing since a minute- he advised!

Stored carbon-di-oxide in my lungs escaped with a heavy sigh. I gasped for fresh oxygen.

To see my reaction, he came very close to me leaving approximately four and half centimeter between us.

I stood pressing the wall behind me.

He gave his flamboyant smile-My favorite!

'Measuring the distance between us?'-he asked as if he read my mind!

Damn! How does he know?

'Don't worry. I don't do anything naughty or shameful...you know me na!'

I was surprised to find my lips parting, eager to touch his-that was the first time I had heard Shubham talk with sense of naughtiness to a girl!

But that's where he was different from most of us.

He knew the very thin line between Code of Ethics and Vulgarity.

'I understand I cannot afford him. I know very well that I love him enough to leave him and vanish-my heart spoke out. And there came my tough side into action.'

"Who said I am even going to be shameful too?" I asked him. The mixed feeling of fear and longing replaced by a tough expression.

'What? You think am gonna eat you up here?'--I knew he had no idea that infact my lips felt a lust to kiss his, for long and tight."

He was taken aback by my sudden change of emotions. The one he was not expecting.

'You are wrong. I will never.' I felt the bitterness in my own voice as words came out.

'Probably you will find someone better, who will stay with your stupidity Mr. Perfect...'

He stood guessing, what I meant by those lines.

For my classmates, I was an arrogant girl who never spoke or gave a shit hint of friendship to anybody else other than Shubham.

Many backbitched me as beauty with a bad attitude, probably a beast.

He didn't reply anything and kept looking at me in daze.

I walked out swiftly unable to face his questioning eyes. I knew I had slapped his pious heart with my words.

"I wonder if he understood my affection for him. I doubt if my guts would ever allow me to explain to him how much I love and admire his abilities and stupid things he does."

I ran towards the prayer ground wiping my tears in pain and read out the thought for the day.

"Will he ever accept me in his life as his life partner, if I tell him right now?"—it still remains a puzzle!

'I have not seen Shubham in his class for the past three days.'

'I inquired his classmates and they said, he was having severe throat infection with fever.'

* * *

A Day Later....

'How are you now? Is your throat still paining?'-I cornered him at the classroom door and asked as he came uphill the school gate.

I always get upset and worried whenever he falls sick. He complaints of chest pain at times whenever we met during recess breaks.

'Ya, am better today'- he replied and sounded very casual.

'Then Piyali, you tell... anything interesting happened while I was absent?'

'Nothing dear except that, some accident took place in the chem. Lab, yesterday.'

'Oh!' What happened?

'Not much detail I have. Go...ask your classmates'-I concluded and left for the assembly.

* * *

Jan 1998

Inter house competitions in our school have started. I am lost again in my dreams as I watched Shubham and Vinod play the final of carom championship against their own classmates from different school-house, Rabindra Pradhan and Navin.

Both Shubham and Vinod are good at playing the carom board. Well, all praised Shubham though ...why not? He is a multitalented who never shows off.

The game took 46 minutes to be exact, as opponents struggled to pot the "Red".

Finally, a masterstroke by Shubham!

Bravo! Bravo! –appreciates our P.E teacher.

He has never seen a shot like that

As Shubham keeps the striker on, at the edge of left corner on the baseline, hides his index finger behind the middle one and hits the diagonally opposite right side of the board at an angle of 45 degree. The striker then just kisses the "Red" at its right edge and it gets lodged in the pocket at the bottom-left-corner of the carom board, the side where Shubham stood.

I jumped on my feet and clapped, hurray!

I am so happy for him.

'He is the new carom champion.'

Ofcourse, Vinod too.

Had there been no one in the room, I would have hug him right then right there. I restrained the desires.

All the four looked at me, as I kept clapping at the door of PT room and then ran away.

Later I went and congratulated him while he was being praised by the ones who hated him.

I know who hated and who not.

'When we are in our schooldays, some or the other Teacher become our Idol.'

'For the first time in my schooling, it was a student. It was him, whom I admired as my Idol.'

He was among those students, who always shared knowledge with others, who never had jealousy with others; he was one who believed in competing with himself rather than with others.

He was equally good in each subject.

* * *
Feb 1998

Our final exam is just few weeks away. I will skip the classes to prepare at home.

'I have enough attendance to skip many. But the mere thought that I will miss Shubham a lot more than classes, freezes me.'

During lunch break-we call it recess period in school, I waited outside my classroom to see Shubham.

But there is no sign of him yet. The bell has rung, the classes continued till 2:45pm.

The school closed at 3pm. Everyone in his class is leaving as I impatiently wait at the scooter shed for him. He has a TVS champ.

'But today I can't find it.'

'Everybody gone.'

He was absent and for next two days again.

'It adds to my worry for him.'

'Should I go and meet him or not?'

'I don't have his number to make a call and ask about his health.'

'What will his Baba think if I go to his home?'-I struggled to find a solution as I go blank with the haunts in my brain.

'After a gap of four days, I saw him eventually in the school premises, way too early.'

'I would reach the school by 08.25am. He will by 08.15am. That day, we both reached at 08 am.'

'I wonder, if coincidences happened in real life too and if it did happen, will it be so pleasant always as it was in that moment.'-I have seen those in movies only.

'What happened, Piyali? You seem lost'—a knuckle on my head wakes me up, as I stood by the classroom entrance door with my head leaning towards right side,

lost in some happy ending tale.

'No, nothing like that'- I told Shubham. He then marched towards his classroom and I followed.

'Why were you absent for four days, ha?'-I demanded the answers.

'I had severe chest pain for two days. So I took rest'- he replied.

'Why do you often get this pain, Shubham?'

'Well, doctor says, it's a muscular pain that triggers out of overwork or stress.'

'I am a bit worried now, Piyali, as this might trouble me in exams too.'

'I don't know how to deal with this.'

'Medicines just make me feel sleepy and if it arises in the middle of any exam, I will be done with it...finished.'-a sense of fear grips upon him.

'Quickly, I apologized—sorry!' I did not mean to distress you. But you must take care of your health.

'Don't study too hard in 11th. You better preserve your energy for the Board exams next year. 60% will be sufficient this year for you.'

'After all, you want to become a doctor, isn't it?'

He gave a nod and said, "Yes I will consider your suggestion". Thank you!

I scampered towards my classroom in fear as soon I noticed its 08.20am on my watch.

Others will start to enter this classroom.

'I never want anyone to know the passion this bond of friendship has between him and me.'

'I don't know exactly if Shubham pretends, he is unaware of my feelings so that someday I disclose myself to him or does he only treats me as just a casual friend?'

At some point earlier, when our friendship blossomed, he did tell me, he has nobody called the best friend yet but he wanted someone to be.

'Was he indicating to me or someone else? Is it gonna be boy or a girl?'

'If it's a boy , I would not mind.'

'If it's a girl, then what, what about me?'

'He is 'just frank' with me but not much.'

One thing I surely knew that he shared most things with Shanti, his raakhi sister in the little islands.

'Was he pointing to her?'—God knows or may be he himself.

I dropped him at his home that day on my Scooty, as he didn't bring the TVS champ.—coincidence again, same company two wheelers.

He was so shy to be seated behind me still maintaining a distance of good 15cms to be precise.

"Love is a dangerous proposition when it is one sided"-I agree with my Maa.

However she won't mind, if Shubham becomes my husband in future.

'Definitely not!'- My instinct replied.

'Maa will happily accept him and we live happily ever after'.

'After all, he belongs to a reputed cultured Bengali family; his father being a teacher in Govt. school and he has a cute younger sister.'

'He has all the qualities to be a good loyal husband and a responsible father later.'

'He is so talented he can do a job or business. Small family happy family is a possibility if Maa accepts him as ' Jaamayee'.'

Maa once advised me-to focus in life, to be independent, to raise myself to face any odd situations that may come as storm.

'How can I tell her, Shubham is that odd storm and I want to go along with it being dependent on him.'

'That he is my life.'

'I realized quickly, how deep the parasite of Love can infest that it can make believe that my family is nothing in front of my love.'

But anyhow I was convinced that such infestation cannot separate me from my Maa and sister and also for a fact that Shubham will never let it happen that way, which is just my weird imagination.

* * *

Three weeks to go for final exams.

'I met Shubham after the school hours.'

'He looked quite disturbed.'

'When I asked him the reason, he said he wasn't happy with the quality of teaching in RBV.'

'His concerns were obvious.'

His physics teacher-Kadar Batcha, taught his own physics way too different from the CBSE books. The notes never matched any chapters.

Biology and Math teachers were just good but not excellent.

Chemistry teacher Reddy sir was the one, good enough and serious about teaching properly in the class.

'He isn't a mug-up typo.'

'He knows basics well in each subject and he possessed an extraordinary skill.....if someone gave him a line from science book, he could tell the chapter name, the page number and the paragraph location too without opening the book though.'

'Wow that's really a magical wand'—his brain.'

'But he is not the same now...his Maa's accidental death just before the X results was none less than a shock. He turned very silent thereafter. He always looks in pain and sorrow as if the dense moisture laden clouds never wanted to leave his vicinity.'

At the same time he was a self motivator too else he would not have performed well in 11th or in his life. He is a broken yet a self-elevated-brave fighter for me.

* * *

March 1998

The days passed so quickly. Our final exams have started. It's unlikely that I will see Shubham. Papers are going well for me. I wish he too wrote well.

I went to school purposely to meet him on his final paper day which was mathematics. I waited in the scooter shed till he came. He was astounded to find me there.

Instantly he inquired-"why are you here Piyali? There is no exam paper for you today, right?"

'I have come for some consultation and notes, Shubham'-I replied as I made an excuse by giving him a reply that I went to consult fine arts teacher about some topics and was about to leave in few minutes, suppressing my devil desires to avoid embarrassing him by telling the truth that I went to see him only. He believed my words.

I asked him about his math paper. He said, it was tough but he will score a 70 plus.

Then he asked about mine. I said, "Mine went good".

I got the advantage point when he asked me to drop him at his home as he didn't bring the champ.

Instead I took him to the beach side. He was confounded this time.

Fresh air blowing away his stiff hair from forehead to back, touching his cheeks as he stood with his two arms, folded and pressed to his diaphragm.

I was just lost within the admiration of the way he stood firm in that speedy wind like he was telling them; "hit me hard and I will show you what I am".

Silence prevailed till he turned his eyes on me.

I remember- he said, "Don't give me those looks, I will vanish".

I was confused if to take that comment as complement or he was trying to mock at me.

'I m flattered', I replied.

'Why did you bring me here?'-he asked.

He needs a valid reason else he will fire me...I murmured.  
'I thought, you will feel better relaxed as you like the sea, as I sensed you are not in good mood. You look dull too'-I replied trying to make him feel that I was there for him to take out the pain he carried with in his thoughts.

'Umm...right!' He said.

For the first time, I saw Shubham coming out with a girl on the beach without any hesitations. Something was surely wrong with him-I was damn sure.

So I started to take him in my stride.

'Shubham!-read for me, a beautiful poetry please'-I urged.

He is too good in writing Hindi poetry.

I used to ask him favours for my Hindi subject and he will lend me his poems.

After a momentary pause, he read out—

"Ye safar abhi thama nahi, mujhe shaakh se jode rakhna. Main na lauta yahan toh mujhe duaaon mey yaad rakhna".

I was stunned at his amazing ability to write instant poems that always touched my heart.

I took a glance at his eyes, it read some pain.

I wanted to hug him tight, I wanted to tell him that I love him and that my love will never diminish for him ever in lifetime, that I would engulf all his pain, that I wanted to be his life partner till the last breathe. But I restrained.

Before we left the beach, I asked him if he liked any girl, someone special.

He replied to me giving away a bit fake smile, that he wasn't sure whether it was special liking kind of feeling or else.

I too did not bother to ask him further as that would mean loss of advantage point for me. But my heart felt jealous and shaken up.

That moment-I never imagined, would be my last meeting with him in RBV. That, by saying those two lines of poetry, he hinted on something which I didn't understand.

* * *

The Exam Result Day

I successfully passed out in the finals with good percentage.

I took my report-card and was waiting inside the shed again to meet Shubham.

By the time it was 12.10pm, every classmate of his left for their home. But I could not see Shubham anywhere.

I went to his classroom. He wasn't there too.

There was no one, whom I could ask about his whereabouts if he came to collect his result card or not.

So I thought to better ask Reddy sir who was 11th science class teacher then.

Sir told me that he stood 1st in the class and he was the first one to take his result.

So I knew then, he went home before me.

And that also meant, I will see him once he comes back to join 12th std in April.

But he never came.

My heart shrunk in pain.

Why didn't he join back in 12th? He never bothered to inform me?

How could he inform me by the way- he never had my contact number? But then, he could have once met me in RBV itself.

Maa had told me, that there will be a phase in the chapter called Love, when we have to part away from the person we love the most and that we have to respect and accept the separation for some time to make sure that's really a True Love-but only if one felt the longing forever.

He never turned back to RBV. It was obvious from the mere fact that he was not happy with the teaching standards.

Neither was I.

After he left RBV, I wasn't able to bear that emptiness he created for me.

I had no one to talk. I felt too lonely and lost.

The school appeared a haunted place to me.

I finally decided to leave the school and then joined KV1 in July, 98.

I didn't dare to meet him at his home, nor did I call him.

'He was my first and last emotional possession.'

'I had faith that someday he will like me, love me and accept me.'

'But once he left without bothering to tell me, I felt very insecure about myself.'

'I knew that he did consume me completely.'

'The pain of separation started engulfing me.'

I joined English tuition centre which was in the housing colony where Shubham lived.

This was the only subject, a weak point for in my academic.

A month later, I dared to meet him by bunking my class. 'Bunked a class for him? Look what you have done to me, Shubham?'-I amused myself while I drove to the Annapurana cafeteria where I had asked Shubham to meet me.

Though I felt unwanted and detached from the world around me, I wanted to have a good time with Shubham.

'Hey champ! You took such a big decision and didn't tell me huh?'-I confronted him with ferocious looks. 'By the way, which is your new school?'-I toned him up.

He looked quite dull and unwell.

'He was silent like a year old kid who has exhausted entire energy playing throughout the day.'

'His dull but otherwise cute childish appearance made me forgot all my momentary anger and fall in love with him again and again.'

As we chatted over the lunch, he told me that he took the TC from school in the month of august. However he did not join any other school that year.

He told me that, he suffered chest pain quite often in past two months and decided to skip a year of schooling.

Moreover he decided to rejoin his previous school; GSSS Model.

It was clear that I would pass out XII before him. And I will miss his company of friendship too.

'Maa was correct; it was time to part-away for good reason.'

But that never meant the end of friendship or the happy days.

'But indeed those were the days when loneliness took me over.'

'My nature from a goody-girl was changing to a real adamant and arrogant girl. I was not talking with anyone at home until the day my younger sister Pihu advised me that I should tell Shubham, straight forward, what he meant for me.'

'But I simply could never.'

'What if he rejected me as soon as I tell him the truth? What if he loves someone else?'

What ifs were a lot and the fear of losing him as a friend was so horrific that I decided not to tell him anything till he felt atleast something for me.

And this is where I have done the biggest mistake of my life.

Days turned weeks and week turned months. I got caught up in studies and he too didn't speak to me for months.

Although he never initiated any talks with me, I wished he did. However I left it that way.

I believed one day he will feel different about me, he will miss my absence. But I was far too optimistic about my possession.

In fact I could not hold on any longer this part-away phase.

My board exams were three months away.

'I never wanted to let myself fall in the hands of love-is-painful kind of ocean.'

'I believed, Love is more powerful!'

'It has magic to do wonders, to take care of little imperfections in us and mould us into a perfect being.'

I never took the liberty of visiting him although my tuition centre was just a minute walk from his home.

One day, as we encountered near the colony gate, I told him that once I finish XII, I wanted to do a degree in Media & Mass Communication or a degree in Journalism.

He looked quite happy at my futuristic planning.

I also told him that, we will have a lunch/dinner feast if I scored an 80% plus in board exam.

He predicted that I will score 85% and to my surprise I did score around 87%. He helped me a great way by arranging many practice papers for the board.

'I owe him everything in my life.'

'It was time for a feast, after the Board results were declared.'

'I made up my mind to assure myself that Shubham was not in relationship with any other girl and if he thought our friendship can ever go a mile further.'

'I wanted to overcome my fear of losing him. I wanted to get rid of the insecurity.'

'I had a gut feeling that he will open-up over the treat.'

On that penultimate day, it was only me and him at the lunch feast at 'The Ananda' hotel.

Shubham has just come back from the tour of Little Islands; where, the people, the friends, the school & everything meant special for him.

He had spent 13years of his life in the little islands.

We ordered the lunch and I started to ask him about his stay in the little islands.

He looked very happy and excited.

He told me that he met few of his old schoolmates; he enjoyed their company, even stayed at Jeet's home for few days before leaving.

'And then he told something which I always feared and wished that God gave me strength to bear it.'

'Piya'-I am feeling, something is changing in me. At times, I feel lost in some world of fantasy where I see a girl walking beside me in the storms, holding my hand, and then leading me to another world where I see nothing except a sunrise. The touch of her hand gives me a sense of inner peace.

As I turn to ask her, she disappears and then a moment later, I hear a whisper in my ear-"Mou"- his smile widened slowly as he started to unfold the secretes, rather the signs of true love.

'Congrats, you have just broken my heart!'-that's what I wanted to tell him-I resisted.

'Congrats dear! You have fallen in love, a true love as I see. May I know who the lucky girl is?' – holding onto every tear my heart wanted to expel.

I asked him in fact... 'Her name is Moumita, right?'

I knew as he had once told me about his Little island schoolmates.

With a blush and little hesitation, he said, "Yes her name is Moumita. She is from the little islands."

"We studied together in IX std for two months, before I left the school to join Model school."

'But I am not sure if it's exactly what you just told me,-True Love.'

'I need to give myself time to be sure.'

'I have never felt different about any girl before, like I felt on the last day in that school leaving IX std and then during this short stay in the little islands when I met her twice.'

'I like her for sure but just not sure enough to be as pious as love. We don't share the bond of friendship even.'

'Then how can I verdict that it is a true love or just a preoccupation of my mind.

'My heart was pierced by his revelation.'

'Time seized for me.'

'That instance just sealed my fate, every hope

I believed about my love and possession, about Shubham.'

'My voice choked. Every fear that came in my dreams, during the days of our school-friendship, they all started to come true.'

'I knew, I had just lost my prince charming to a stranger.'

'In-fact, it was a true friend, I lost that day, not because our relation will ever break....because, he, who consumed me within his soul unknowingly, will now be possessed by someone else like I was possessed by him.'

'You prepared yourself to face this...didn't you?'

'You setup this lunch treat to clear your doubts and fears, you wanted to know if Shubham felt the same as you feel for him, isn't it? And now since you have got your answers, don't you have the courage to accept and live with it?' - Time asked questions of me.

'I felt, his heart was falling for Moumita, he was very slowly getting inclined to her-like the way I fell for him. Whenever he uttered Moumita, I could see a grin on his face.'

'Inside; my heart tasted jealously for that instance.'

'Lunch was going to be over soon, so as my undisclosed love-story.'

'I composed myself to face it and let Shubham feelthat I felt very happy for him.'

If sacrifice was the need of that situation, I was happy to sacrifice myself, my desires to see Shubham nourishing his life with whatever he wanted.

'So, shall we move out now?'-I asked him.

'Yes, we should. But before we leave, I thought to present you a gift'–he replied, still feeling the vibrant touch of love.

'No, I don't need any gifts. Our friendship and your presence is the best gift ever in my life. Just be in touch as I will move to a college in Chennai in few weeks to join a course in Media & Journalism'-I disclosed to him with a heavy heart.'

I knew he wasn't good at all in buying gifts for any girl not even for himself.

"Shubham, I hope you find true love in someone who will make you smile in hard days, who will never leave you behind and never take you for granted, who will always standby you when you are right and when you are wrong, who will be by your side at your worst times, who will hug you when you are cold and kiss you in the rains and would not have it other way, with the one you find your heart, your inner-self at peace with your mind. And above everything, whatever you do in life-never lose hope, never underestimate yourself and always focus on your abilities. -I wished him with all my heart and this was the ultimate day when I and Shubham have last met".

He stood silent for few seconds and then told me; 'goody-girl; when you find your true love, I should be the first one to know. Be in touch and call me before you leave for Chennai'.

We then bid goodbye to each other and headed towards our home.

'I locked myself up in my room; lying on the bed, face crushed on the pillow, crying the entire day and night and kept blaming myself that I had missed what I shouldn't have.'

'I should have expressed my feelings straight to him without any fear of the consequences, earlier in RBV.'

I learnt a lesson, 'When you are in love, every minute is a right time. If one waits for an opportunity without trying, you have to face bitter facts at times. Never hide your feelings just for the sake of holding on to any relation...just express it. Holding on to emotions and stretching the strings of relation above friendship knowing the fact the love blossomed in my heart, only landed me breaking it like my heart-break that day.'

'Meeting Shubham was the most memorable part in my life, becoming his friend was my choice, falling in love with him was beyond my control, losing him this way will be my fate. I got addicted to him and I can never ever fall in love with anybody with the same passion.'

A month later, sometime in June mid of 1999, I spoke to him over phone and told him that I was leaving the city to join the college in Chennai in two days. Neither he nor I insisted to meet in person.

'I believed if it's a true friendship we will be reunited once and forever.'

'It was time for me to face the storm that he brought unknowingly in my life.'

'I had to move on but my love, my feelings for him never changed and day after tomorrow when I will meet him after so long, I will again fall in love with Shubham as I had fallen every day in the past five years.'

'The only difference is that, he does not know that I had a spy on him all these years and he still is the only boy-friend I have.'

'I have treasured his absence all these years and wore the pain of separation only to become strong.'

'His possession changed my life for good and my love for him transformed me into a better person ever.'

....End of Piyali's diary....

* * *

After going through Piyali's story, I left a message for Shubham on his whatsapp messenger.

'Hi Shubham!'-As I read Piyali's story, I felt it was very tragic for her and on your part as well.

Don't blame yourself for whatever had happened. I am sure, if you had any hint of her feelings, you would have never let her go this way.

These are all those experiences in life which you have found strength from.

I hope there are lots of better things that have happened in your life since then and I am eagerly waiting to listen to those.

Do revert.

We are leaving back day after tomorrow for Chennai and then to Mumbai.

Keep me posted through email about the rest of your story.

For two weeks there were no reverts from his side.

I requested my company manager to arrange me an official visit to the Islands.

I must know the rest of his story. I decided to meet Shubham. So I left him an email, inviting him to meet me as soon as I landed there in the islands.

Finally I met him a day after I reached there at the LH Restaurant in the vicinity of a beautiful entertainment park near the sea shore, near to the college where he still finds memories of his love and the scar that he has told me that day.

'Why were you not responding Shubham? Is everything fine with you?'-He looked so upset that his misty eyes were immovable.

Wiping out, he said-"I lost Moumita once again".

I was stunned.

'Where and when did you find her?'

* * *
Part 6

W

The Scar....

People change with time, so as friends. People part away for one or the other reasons, so as good friends. Sometimes we let them go even when we never wanted so, sometimes they leave us right during schooling or college or for the sake of career.

Everyone does leave at some point of time. We cannot hold them forever with us. What remains with us, is just memories associated with them.

However Shubham was very lucky to be in constant touch with many of his childhood friends, and with few them he used to talk over a sip of tea or a lunch regularly or do a facebook chat.

07 Oct 2016

That day was a regular routine day for Shubham.

He was already late for his office. He was about to shutdown his laptop and was thinking to rush like a biker. He was a usual 'facebooker'.

As he was about to sign off for that time-being, his eyes rolled over the friend request.

Quickly he checked and a hidden smile popped up on his face. He accepts the friend request and reluctant to go for his routine job, he sits on the chair and loses himself on to a different world.

'The world where he could see the flashbacks of 16yrs of his past in bits and pieces.'

After few minutes a message pops up; 'How are you?' It has been long time. It's good to reach out and see old childhood friends again.

The message was from one of his childhood friend Tisha.

Shubham woke up from his flashbacks and replied; 'Yes, indeed. I am fine dear!' How about you Tisha?

Tisha-'I m good Shubham, settled in Kolkata, a proud homemaker, have a 10yr kid.'

As he continued his chat with Tisha, his heart and mind took abrupt diversions and the surroundings got invaded by the smiling face of "MOUMITA"-his unfixed Love! Shubham felt wistful longing for those reminiscences.

'Are you in touch with any of our classmates, Tisha?'-Shubham asked curiously.

Tisha replied-'yes, with Ishita and Moumita.'

'Moumita, where is she now? How are her parents? How about her life, what she does, when did they leave from the islands?'

-Shubham was selfishly expecting if this could be the answers for his search that turned defeating in 2005 and 2008 then.

Without delay, Tisha replied-'Moumita and her parents are settled in Kolkata. Moumita is working in Healthcare.'

'Oh Ok! Has she got married or not?'-Shubham asked.

'No Shubham, she didn't.'

'I and Ishita met her last year when Ishita came here to meet us'-Tisha replied.

And then, the Scar that left Shubham immensely in a depressed state once many years back, only got deeper and deeper as his seven years of search for his escaped friend and love has just reached the destiny.

"Behind every scar there is an untold story of survival."

The Scar; only made Shubham a better person, a lone warrior.

"I should have tried hard, I should have...to find her....I deserve this pain"-Shubham felt so low and torn apart again.

Was he thinking of getting back to Moumita? ---Never... He can't...He won't.

'Why were you so depressed after chatting with Tisha?'-I asked Shubham as I could see his expressions swung healthy to depressing.

'At some point I lost hope that I would never hear about Moumita in years to come.'

'All these years I have turned to facebook pages several times to know about her whereabouts but how could I miss searching Moumita's friend Tisha & Ishita who could have given me the lead back in 2008 to find whom I was searching for? Was I so blank that time?'

'Did I get caught up in my own ethics? Everything still remains unfixed SK'-he replied

'I understand how you must have felt, Shubham.

'However one has to move on.

'You can't keep blaming yourself for everything which has not happened in your favour in the past and I guess it had happened for a good reason otherwise you would not have met such an understanding life partner, I mean your wife.'- I consoled Shubham and he agreed completely.

But there was lot behind his unfixed love story

And I urged Shubham to tell me in detail everything about him and Moumita and whatever had happened after his friend Tisha told him about Moumita

Then, I came to know about his true unconditional love for Moumita which still remains unfixed.

* * *

Part 7

W

"MOUMITA- The Unfixable Love"

Very often Shubham will ride through the road in front of the degree college, then to his best friend's house onto another lane where his childhood friend and classmate, Moumita used to live with her Maa, Baba and two brothers.

But all he could find in vain was the lock that had sealed that flat for ever where once he could watch this special friend, giving a hypnotizing smile and waving a bye to him.

The silence of the flat had the sweet voice, echoing of "Moumita"-The girl who always meant special to his heart, whom he loved so much that he had let her go for ever without letting her know, how deep it was.

'For almost ten years SK, a strange dream has disturbed me very much every night. I had never slept a peaceful night.'

'In that dream, I find myself in an aircraft, that will start of the runway under a pleasant and calm weather but as the time passed, the aircraft would go through many storms and finally It will crash but just before it descended to crash, my eyes will open to see a bright sunrise and a shadow image of Moumita and a moment after the crash I will find myself in a placid sea, lost forever; every night-same dream.'

'But the day I heard about Moumita from Tisha, the dream has disappeared too. She too does not come to my dreams anymore.'

'Am I getting rid of the past or is my brain trying to reject to allow her within my nerves?' I am confused.

'Does this happen when we let our love go, crushing our desires? Desires to remain bonded in a way, stay in touch as long as our heart permits.'

The questions started piling up and Shubham was getting choked by sea of emotions.

I could sense, his mind started talking to the heart as he continued his story-

'It's never easy to let go a person we love from the core of our heart and expecting that some day they will come back to us. It was never easy to break my own heart.'

'It all started in year 2000, as I pushed myself towards the ICU but then withdraw myself only to end up sitting lonely at the shore, praying for her survival, believing that she will and when she would open her eyes slowly, her life will change for better.'

'I never had the courage to see her state of agony, the time she was fighting with, for every breath she took.'

'Her body rested unconscious but I could feel the tortures she was bearing when all the drips and the tubes of the machines , the needles, the injections were pricked into her beautiful lean hands and the doctors kept checking her stats every half an hour to make her come back to life.'

"What's happening to me? Am I falling in love? Am I falling for her? Why am I not able to watch her on that bed?"

The sunlight wanes as Shubham wiped the tears and realized, "Yes, he loved her. It could be nothing except a true love".

That's more than he admitted to himself that moment.

For next three days he bound himself at home praying for Moumita's recovery and for the first time Shubham started trusting the almighty.

I interrupted Shubham and asked what exactly had happened to Moumita.

I had to ask Shubham to calm his mind.

'One of my IX classmates had informed me that Moumita tried to hang herself.'-he told.

As shocked as Shubham, I too, asked –"you mean, she tried to commit suicide?"

'Yes'-he replied!

'But why such a step?'-She was a mentally tough girl as you told.

'I can't imagine she could ever do that to herself. I never inquired about the reason.'

'But I heard at hospital from Naveen-one of our classmate that somebody rumored; she was having an affair with someone in the school and that her parents came to know this and scolded her very badly.' -Shubham replied and continued.....

'I knew something like this was going to happen, the day I met her family back in Little Islands.'

'When I went twice after clearing secondary and then senior secondary exams; I could not take it well that the lively and bubbly girl who used to talk a lot with friends in school, always smiling, full of naughtiness had suddenly turned so silent and selfish for herself.'

'I felt her family had put too many restrictions on Moumita. It is quite obvious that every conservative parent would never want their child specially a girl to get too much involved with friends but for Moumita it was too harsh.'

'Such a strict attitude might have let Moumita feel separated from her family and that might be the reason she took such a step.'

'I felt this, every time I met her family after they had shifted to the capital and lived here till Moumita finished her college; that she was very aloof very silent very reserved.'

'Days passed by, she got recovered within a month or two.'

'Her family had shifted to the capital, she joined the degree college.'

'But I never met her until I came back in 2001 discontinuing my engineering from Orissa then.'

'Discontinued engineering?' –I asked him in a state of shock.

One of the talented student of my time left engineering?

'Well SK, engineering was not my cup of tea or that I hardly enjoyed learning those subjects. I always wanted to do a degree in medicines.'

'My hopes were shattered when I could not join either MBBS or other disciplines of medicines even after I was on the top of the merit list in almost all branches of medicinal degree courses.'

'It was very strange and tough for me to digest that lot of confusions regarding the scope of courses other than MBBS had kept me and family guessing which course was better then.'

'I had no choice but to surrender as I was dependent monetarily on my parent.'

'Anyways I was a self motivator.'

'So I tried to get admission in Comp sc, in the same degree college of my hometown where Moumita was in 2nd year of BSc.'

'So, did you get admission? Got a chance to meet her?'-I asked.

'No, I did not join that college either. All seats were filled up by the time I returned and applied.'

'I and my friend Naresh were making a plan to join some college in Chennai but I ended up joining a Degree course in computes in distance mode and Naresh went on to join Engineering college.'

'I hadn't had the opportunity to live the happy days of college. I never had a college life.'

'I could never imagine that a student of my calibre would have such a messed up academic.'

'Everybody of my X and XII school batch would tell me, how tragic it was to get the talent wasted, like me.'

'Why not?' Everybody believed I would do great and shine in whichever field I chose.'

'May be I did not have the courage to go against the tide, my family and the decisions they took for me, that time. Or may be I didn't have the courage to hold onto those high expectations.'

'It's all about right time and right decisions.'

'I and Moumita were so close yet so far. Distance never separated us but feelings and attitude did.'

'I wished, I had not turned back to see the shy smile of Moumita, on the penultimate day in IX std.'

'At times I think, had I stayed and studied till XII std in that school, things would have been different today.'

'What exactly do you mean by that? Are you saying, if you had remained in that Little islands, you would not have fallen for Moumita and life would have been different now for you or are you telling me that you would have fallen for her and life would have been different?'- I asked Shubham in a state of confusion.

At the mention of "Little Islands" changing the topic himself, Shubham said, "you know, I have very sweet memories of the Little islands and the school where I had studied and rediscovered myself."

Shubham has a terrific memory of remembering his childhood.

I understood he loved and missed the Little islands more than anyone else.

And more than that he missed his school where he had spent eleven years growing from an average to a better student.

Shubham left the Little islands during the 1st term of IX std, that was in Sep 1995.

But those eleven years of schooling there, were the most Happy Days of his life in GMSS Little Islands.

He became emotional as his reminiscences.

His eyes went numb at the memory of his school where he had built solid foundations for nine long years. The school was nothing less than a home to Shubham.

How could he snap all bonds?

'When I think of my childhood and specially the schooldays, I find the bright faces of my teachers and friends, flashing through my mind which gives me immense pleasure.'

'I can clearly identify the yellow painted school building, the brown painted tall pillars and glass window panes of the class rooms, the PT room, the library, the classrooms, the long corridors and even the small room of the school peon just at the start of dense forest next to the six roomed wooden structure building that occupied students of Class 1 to 4th.'

In a flash, many faces crossed his mind—the firm but friendly face of the Principal, the encouraging faces of the teachers, the strict eyes of the PET Mr. Suraj, the bushy moustache of the school peon Ram-Uncle as everyone addressed him and the fresh face of Sasi-his first crush with whom he had a cold war till XII std, Shija-the most descent and introvert girl of his batch, Saawan, Gopa, Dilip-who always used to fight in class, Shreya- his cousin whom he trusted more than himself.

It was 8.45AM. Shubham had to return home and I with Ipshita, went back to hotel to dine.

The next evening:

Year 2016 is going to end on a high note. Winter season has started. The pleasant cold breeze was having a soothing effect on my writing. I felt writing is not that easy but Shubham made it look so finer and easier for me with his narration.

'So tell me more about your most memorable and happy days Shubham. We can always come back for Moumita's and your story. Isn't it? -I urged him to relive his schooldays.'

'Where shall I start SK....it has been a tremendous journey for me having lived in the Little islands for almost 14years.'

* * *

Part 8

W

The Little Islands - The Happy Days

"Look at me beta; don't cry. See, lots of children here. Don't cry. Play with them."

'It is the day when every child gets introduced to the world of education first time. It was Shubham's first day of School life.'

'His mother had left him in safe hands of the Nursery class teacher-Kutty Madam at the FCNS, three kilometers away from his home.'

'As we all do when left alone by mother at the age of three to strangers and the unfamiliar gathering, I too kept crying until Ayyamma-the lady peon who kept cheering and playing with everyone, came and gave me a hug.'

'She held me in her arms and made me sit on a small tricycle.'

'Like teacher, every single kid in that nursery was a stranger but as the time set off, we started to learn, we started to mingle with each other mostly during playtime.'

'I hardly have any special memories of the nursery except that it was the foundation of my education.'

'I made friends like Mahesh, Saawan, Kavitha, Shubha, Aneesh, Shuben, Simmy, Ancy who did study together till X standard.'

'From FCNS, I moved on to GMSS-Hutbay to join First Std and continued schooling till IX std. It was one of the best and top schools of my era.'

'That school has given me a lot, which I deserved being a student-love and affection of teachers, their - blessings, their appreciation, great and lovable friends.'

'That school taught me to believe in hope, hope for a better tomorrow, to stay focused whenever I felt and feared of darkness in my life, that after every darkness, the sun rises again.'

'It has taught me, how to survive my own fears, to trust in self when there is no one to support.'

'I have lots of treasured memories of that school, of those nine long years.'

'You will find funny and be surprised to know that from class 1 to 4, I was below average student in terms of studies. I never scored appreciable marks in any subject.'

'But when I was in class V, an accident did some magic to my brain I guess and my academics improved by leaps and bounds.'

'Till class IV, my cousin Shreya stood first. I was nowhere in the ranking. When we progressed to class V, I had met a major accident.'

'That's quite interesting, Shubham!'

'Yeah!' Sort of.

'Back in the Capital-Port Blair, my grandfather's condition was quite serious.'

'It was during Diwali holidays 1991-my family went to see grandfather.

His house was located on a hilly area, very much accessible to the main road.'

'On the day of "Bhai-Dooj", I was burning crackers outside when my grandmother called me in and asked me to bring something from shop which was opposite of that main road.'

'I went down the hill and was waiting to cross the road. At some distance on my right side I saw a Taxi was very slowly moving in my direction and from the left there were lot of vehicles coming uphill.'

'It was too much traffic to cross.'

'I waited for few more minutes having a look on the left side and then suddenly I heard somebody shouting and telling me to move back.'

'That Taxi gained too much momentum and was furiously coming towards me.'

'The next moment, I opened my eyes in pain, there were lot of fishermen surrounding me asking, where was my home, where were my parents.'

'I tried to get up, I couldn't. I felt my right leg was too stiff and separated.'

The bone was fractured into two pieces.'

'My eyes felt darkness as I tried to get up second time. I could see fresh blood oozing out of my right leg. Someone from the crowd started shouting to call the ambulance.'

'Lying on the road helpless, I was noticed by my mother who had rushed out of the house to see the chaos. She had probably noticed my red t-shirt and she rushed from the hill-top towards me. Mother shouted so loud crying out that my father and uncle heard it inside at home and they too came to the spot.'

'I was hit by that Car.'

'The last thing I could remember was that the car came at very high speed, may be losing the breaks and had hit me.'

'The driver tried to escape after hitting but was grabbed by one of the shopkeepers there, as told by the eye-witnesses.'

'I was taken to the hospital in the same taxi.' 'Surgeons operated the right leg and I was hospitalized for a month.'

'Maa used to sit beside my bed without having proper food for all days and nights and took care of me.'

'Then one day, fearing an epidemic, doctors discharged me.'

'I was taken back to home.'

'The next day onwards there were severe pain and my right leg swelled gradually. Later when x-ray was done we came to know that while I was being shifted from the stretcher to ambulance, the operated leg got dislocated.'

'Within a week we flew to Kolkata for another surgery. There I was operated three more times, first at Kolkata Medical College, then at NRS hospital. Both attempts failed due to mere negligence of doctors.'

'Finally I was admitted to a private nursing home in Ganesh Chandra Avenue near Sealdah.'

'After all those trials, I learnt to be strong enough to bear every pain. I learnt to be self composed facing whatever hurdle, life was testing me with.'

'The surgeon of the Nursing home was very pleased and surprised to see that I never cried out of pain from those surgeries.'

'He had appreciated my courage and told me to be very strong and to study well.'

'That was the first time I self-realized, I can cross every barrier with my will power if and whenever I wanted to. That was a major turning point in my life at the age of 10.'

'I was discharged within two weeks. We came back to the islands, back to home.' But there was a major challenge-how would I go to the school and sit for seven hours? So the Principal sanctioned special permission for me so that atleast math and science teachers were allowed to teach me at my home after school hours.'

'My father who was also a teacher in the same school taught rest of the subjects.'

'For next three months my home was my school. I self studied for the exam and after a long gap of five months I went to school only to appear for the exam.'

'I had to use the 'baisakhi' to walk.'

'It took me a year to recover and walk properly.'

'When the class V final exam results were declared, I stood first with 100% marks in most subjects and everybody in my school appreciated my will power and hard work.'

'So, the accident got better out of you, isn't it Shubham?'

'Yes, SK.' I never looked back after that. I studied well enough and stood top in class VI and VII too. The competition was with me.'

'I overcame my inabilities turning them into my strength.'

'My classmates were very supportive. They never felt jealous of me neither do I.'

'My classmates Dilip, Gopa, Mahesh, Anish, Shuben, Labeesh, Finny and I were quite a gang of good friends in the school. Dilip was too descent but he and Gopa always used to fight a lot. One will lock up the other during recess in the class while other classmates played outside.'

'Finny, Mahesh, Anish, Shuben and Labeesh were good in playing cricket apart from studies. I performed well in the sports too.'

'Even though my right leg was not cent-percent fit for sports activities, I got silver in Long jump in annual sports of my school, then the best bowler commendation certificate in the school tournament final wining the cricket match taking 5 wickets in one over. We had defeated senior team by 3 runs.'

'Those encouraging moments gave me determination in life to stay focused no matter how tough times were.'

'Well done Shubham!'

'So after that everything went well ha?'-I had to appreciate the way he carried himself after that accident being a kid, was inspirational.

'Not everything, SK'-he replied. I went off-track when I was in VIII std.

'I always trusted and respected my classmates. More than that I blindly had trust on my own cousin, Shreya.'

'But, one incident defamed me overnight in the entire school. I was equally responsible too.'

'In VI std, we had one new girl student-Sasi. She had come from VKV school as her parents got transferred to the Little islands.'

'She was very pretty.'

'Most of my classmates hovered around her as she was the only one well versed in English speaking. We hardly knew spoken English.'

'I hated her because after she had joined, many things started changing.'

'Teachers forced us to speak in English always.'

'During the play time, earlier all girls and boys played together maintaining the decorum.'

'But her entry stopped that trend. Boys and girls were made to play separately.'

'There was superior and inferior complex getting into us. Sasi would always avoid talking to boys.'

'If any boy, by mistake collided with her, then that used to be a punishment day for him.'

'But somehow, I had a crush on her.'

'She was an excellent classical dancer.'

'I was always an admirer of art and classical dance although I don't know the abc of it.'

'I could never let my eyes off her whenever she performed. The more she performed, the more I got attracted to her beauty.'

'Gradually, I started finding reasons to talk to her; be it asking English notes or a Hindi to English translation or requesting her to play basketball with me.'

'I started doing silly things.'

'I used to wake up early at 5 am and sitting on my study table, I would watch her from the window hiding myself enough not be noticed by her-she used to clean the backyard of her house, every morning at 5.30am.'

'Everytime I saw her, I felt that she was so down to earth girl.'

'Shreya and few others were noticing this little drift in me.'

'One day, Shreya asked me if I liked Sasi. I agreed with her but that was very casual reply.'

'Then Shreya told me, if I liked her; it meant I loved her too.'

'I was too immature to differentiate the thin line between crush and love.'

'Shreya gave me a two hours lecture about crush love and related every change in me to my liking for Sasi-basically it was a mindwash which I later learnt.'

'I was amazed at Shreya.'

'When she told me about the love–shuv things, I foolishly believed that if she was excellent in studies, might be she was true.'

'So, I just followed her instructions and next day in school, during the recess-I wrote a chit mentioning "I love U" and gave it to Shreya which she handed over to Sasi and I went to the playground.'

A moment later, our class-monitor came running and said, "Shubham-please go to the staff room immediately. You have been called upon by Sasi's mother."

'I trembled in fear but anyhow I had to face whatever was up there.'

'When I entered the staff-room, I saw Shreya standing with her head down, Sasi wiping her tears and our class-teacher, my father and Sasi's mother all staring at me in anger.'

'The very next moment-blows of slaps on my face left my throat choked with tears.'

'It took just few seconds to realize that Sasi had complaint the matter to our class teacher. Sasi's mother asked Shreya and Sasi to leave the room.'

'You come from a cultured and educated family, to do this, to bring shame to our school and your family?'-Vijaya mam yelled on me.

'I kept my silence because even if I had uttered the truth it wouldn't have bothered anyone-the damage was already done.'

'My father could not stop beating me until Chaaya mam-our Hindi subject teacher came and stopped him.'

'I felt very ashamed.'

'After that incident, except Jeet and Mala nobody spoke to me.'

'There was hush-hush laughter in my class. Most of them avoided sitting with me.'

'I became the bad-bad boy for them, became the talk of the town. I felt so cheap inside.'

'Two things had died that day.'

'First; the blind-trust I had on Shreya.'

'Second; the brave side of mine.'

'It seriously affected my studied.'

'I moved down to third position in class VIII final exam.'

'Thereafter, I maintained distances, surprisingly from every teacher and friend.'

'At home, Maa was the one who believed that his son could not do such nuisance.'

'Whenever I tried to tell her the truth about that mistake, I felt so choked with fear and nothing came out of me.'

'I was holding a fake face at home pretending to be fine while my inner peace was taken away.'

'Back in the school, I could never make direct eye contact with Sasi's mother or my class teacher. Even I choked to wish them.'

'The guilt of that shameful act was so much that I had lost friendship with Sasi too.'

'I too, never tried to explain to anybody. I left for Time to heal this wound and hoped that others too sooner or later will discover the truth behind it.'

'There were drastic changes taking place within me. The class appeared empty to me even though I had great friends.'

'I felt, I was going to the school for name sake.'

'Then in IX std first term, I had got border-mark in Math subject.'

'I started losing self confidence.'

'In the meantime, there were many new admissions in IX std which I skipped noticing.'

'I had strictly restrained myself to stay away from the company of girls forever.'

'But it just turned a promise to be broken soon.'

'So, you could not resist the crush, isn't it Shubham?'- I asked him.

'The crush had already suffered a death as soon as I was in IX std. But you see, when we wish for everything to settle or go our way, destiny always has some surprise for us and the most unexpected ones too.'

'On 11th Sep, 1995, there came a tragic news.'

'In the 5th period, I was told by my class teacher to go back home.'

'When I reached home I saw gathering of the school teachers and friends of my parents stood in silence.'

'As I approached my bedroom, Maa hugged me tight and kept crying a lot. My younger sister was sitting beside Maa.'

'She was just 7 years then. Then someone from behind whispered into my ears that my grandfather had expired suffering a cardiac arrest.'

'Everything went dark instantly.'

'When I regained consciousness, I could not stop crying.'

'Grandpa loved me a lot. He was the tallest in

our family; around 6feet 5 inches tall.'

'Like his height, he always held a high stature in the society because of his intelligence, knowledge and wisdom.'

'He was an excellent artist, a great harmonium player and his English writing; grammatical and speaking skills were far superior although he was only a matriculate from the British era.'

'When I was a kid "Dadu" used to take me for a long walk on his strong shoulders. He was muscular at 56.'

'He was my great friend too.'

'My Maa always said that I had inherited the physique, the intelligence, the grace and ability to hold the head high in tough times from my grandpa.'

'It was the month of monsoon storms.'

'We travelled 10 hours by ship in rough sea conditions to reach the capital city as my father had to carry out the last rituals.'

'After thirteen days we were back to the Little islands.'

'In the meantime my father had applied for transfer to the capital city. This news added to my injury.'

'I was attached and addicted to the school where I had lived and cherished my childhood.'

'I requested my father not to shift to the capital city but he argued that since he had to take care of grandma, it was a must.'

'He also convinced me and Maa that I and my sister will get better schooling and later, better career options in the capital. I could not take this argument well.

'My school was also competent enough.'

'We had experienced and talented teachers.'

'But Maa told me that I was not an adult to take correct decisions that time.'

'I wasn't happy with Maa either.'

'She too loved that place. She had spent 15yrs of her life and had seen me growing up there.'

'Today when I look back, I wish we had never left the Little Islands.'

'The shifting did a collateral damage, beyond repair. Had we stayed few more years in the Little islands, things would have been different.'

'Why so, Shubham? Didn't you get a better educational, schooling and a steady life what your father had convinced you before shifting?'-I asked him in desperation.

'The capital city took away everyone I loved, everyone I had treasured till then leaving me alone to confront with time and destiny.'

Shubham's Last Few Days in IX Std  
at GMSS Little Islands

'As soon as the school reopened after two months summer vacation on 1st July 1995, there were few new faces in the IX std. We had only one section with around 28 students.'

'Look at the 3rd bench, last row-the tall girl'-said one of my classmates, pointing towards a 5feet tall Bong-girl, the new-comer.

'She had a dusky complexion, long blackish hair that ran just below the shoulder-height and her dark-black-cozy eyes were very appealing like they had decades of stories to tell.'

'There was some invisible attraction in her.'

At first instance, my heart said, "Just step forward and say hi."

The next moment my mind said, "Don't ever, you already learnt a lesson last year."

'I never made any desperate attempts to speak to her in those three months, not even till the day I left the school when my father was transferred to the capital islands.'

'I was scared, of repeating any mistake like I did in VIII std.'

'It sure was tough but not impossible; after all I was a rarest prototype when it came do a friendship with any girl.'

Those moments, are just a memory that I laugh off now.

I remember the last day in that school-'The school for the day was going to be over by 2:45pm. I was sitting beside Jeet and Naveen.'

'The last period was English but the teacher left early wishing me a good future and asked me to bid goodbye to everyone before I left the classroom.'

'It was very emotional moment for me. I wanted to say goodbye to everyone in the class, but I was speechless.'

'I stood up and had a look at everyone's face.'

'Some were talking, while few smiled and raised their hands to wave a bye.'

'Then the bell rang.'

'Among the girls, Vasanti and Mala came forward to see off but nobody moved out of their benches till I stood the classroom door.'

'And for one final time, I scanned the school buildings, the playground and everything around it as I held my tears from bursting out.'

'As I was about to exit, I heard laughter from within the classroom.'

'I turned back and my eyes got stuck on her cozy-eyes and the shy-smile.'

'She was standing beside Tisha and Ishita.'

'Three of them were mocking on some boys.'

'I was mesmerized by her.'

"One day I will make friendship with you-my mind and heart whispered synchronously."

'I didn't even understand that I had started liking her, every time I saw her talking to someone.'

'Yet I couldn't talk to her.'

'I knew that I had to control myself and just do what I was supposed to do-Focus and Study well.'

'I wanted to make sure it's not the infatuation again at the adolescence that might ruin my academics.'

'I gave myself a long term break of four years to be exact.'

'But she kept coming back every year in some related incidents.'

'I still blame myself for that one moment when I had turned back to see that girl with those magical-attention seeking-smile that lit some bulbs in my heart.'

'Who had ever known, that my life was going to be controlled by her possession for two decades. A possession which she would be unaware of.'

'This girl was Moumita, right Shubham?' - I asked knowingly.

He nodded in approval, expelling all the pain he had that moment from his memories.

'Which school did you join after your shifting to the city?'

"GSSS Model" and there I regained my lost Focus and learnt to survive among stiff competition.

* * *
Part 9

W

The first day in GSSS Model, IX –Section E, when I could not reply back in English to the English teacher, the comment from one of the classmate tasted bitter. Anvesha mocked at me, "Jungle se aaya hai, isko angrezi bolna nahi aata mam."

'There was huge difference.'

'At GSSS Model, English subject was course-A with comprehensions and passages mostly whereas my previous school had Course B that dealt with grammar and literature only.'

'Mid-term results were declared in Dec-95. I scored 33/100 in English.'

'Next day, my father was called upon by the subject teacher in Principal's office and she didn't leave a chance to insult me.'

I heard her saying, "Your son doesn't know to speak in English. Moreover he has scored only 33, just passing mark. He is not fit to study in our school".

'That was rude and insulting.'

'But my father had belief in his teachings. He had taught me basics strong enough to compete. He firmly assured my English teacher that, I will score 100 in the final exams and top the class.'

'Father handed over a handwritten note to the English teacher and asked her to show the answer after two days.'

'Shockingly after two days, she apologized to my father for being arrogant the other day.'

'My teacher later had shown me that paper.'

'My father had asked her to translate a para from Hindi to English and one para from English to Hindi.'

'She couldn't.'

'Now I had a point to prove that my foundation was strong enough and better than just scoring marks.'

'I worked hard on translations.'

'To learn spoken English, I started listening to cricket commentaries; newspapers etc and then I did extremely well in the final exams.'

I agree with Shubham.

I had met his science teacher from the GSSS Model once and she couldn't stop praising Shubham.

'She had told me, that he was one of the best students that school had from the 1995 to 2000 batch.'

'Many students from other sections used to come to him with complex questions in science and math when he was in X std.'

Life changes every single moment. Life gave a chance to Shubham to prove a point, to prove himself and he was up to the task. Time is everything. If something is meant to happen, be it favourable or unfavourable, it will happen at the right time and for the right reasons.

'But time had more challenges to offer to Shubham.'

'Both Sasi and Shreya had joined the same school in Class X. Shreya and Sasi were in A section whereas Shubham was in X-E.'

'His past has chased him.'

'He and Sasi used to take the same bus to their school every day.'

'One day, both Sasi and Shubham came face to face in the assembly area.'

'Sasi tried to avoid him and as she started to walk away, Shubham said, "I am sorry for whatever had happened.

But it wasn't totally my fault alone. You will come to know the truth someday Sasi. If possible, forgive me".

'Sasi stood silent for a minute, turned back and gave: you-better-be-sorry look to Shubham and walked away to her classroom.'

'The very next day, when they travelled in the same bus after school, Shubham took the seat just behind Sasi's.'

Intentionally, he told Sasi's friend, "We should not judge a friend from just one bad experience. Give them a chance to clarify or you go a step forward to know the truth".

'Sasi felt something in his words and two days later she wrote a note for Shubham and gave it to her friend to hand it over to Shubham.'

"You shouldn't have done whatever you did in VIII std. Mala told me the truth after you left the school in IX but I was waiting to see if you would ever apologize to me or not."

"You did. I forgive you. But we cannot be friends anymore. Be happy. Don't think too much and don't trust blindly on anybody" – Sasi wrote in her note.

Shubham felt relieved and he concentrated more and more on his studies.

His X Board exams went extremely well. His board results were about to release by the last week of May.

Meanwhile he made a visit to the Little Islands.

This time he met 'Shanti'.

'She had an amazing aura about her.'

'She became his rakhi-sister.'

'He met few friends from his old school and on two occasions he also went to Moumita's home.'

I asked Shubham about this visit, "Did you make friendship with Moumita?"

'No, SK.' She wasn't that frank either in the presence of her parents. Otherwise she was a bubbly girl who spoke nonstop at times in the school.

'I met her because I wanted to know more about her.'

The second shocking incidence took place just before his X board results.

'Shubham lost his mother.'

'She suffered a renal failure.'

'Doctors could have saved her life but it was one unfortunate day when the Medicine required to keep her kidneys functional were out of stock and the flight by which the substitute was sent from Chennai, was cancelled due to heavy rain.'

'This loss was unbearably intense.'

'He gradually turned silent and remained cut-off from family, relatives and friends for months carrying the huge emotional burden.'

"Have you thought of those orphans who have lost their mother just after birth or in some accident? Don't they live and move on in life? You should be thankful to the God that you could spend a long innings with your mother. You have to be bold and brave Shubham here onwards.

Your sister will also look up to you as her emotional strength"- his Math teacher Mr. Maiti offered him words of comfort and reassurance.

'After his mother's death, Shubham's father took good care of both; him and his younger sister.'

'Soon, he realized that the only way to pay tribute to his mother was to follow her last wish.'

'He could never forget his mother's last words on the death bed-"take care of everyone, never disobey your father, study well, never lose hope and be a good human being".

'When results were declared, he had scored 78% and he held the 2nd position in his school in science subject.'

'His science teacher, Mrs. Nirmala Iyer praised him a lot and encouraged him to be focused despite the hardships he was going through.'

'Shubham shifted from Model school to RBV.'

'Every teacher and his then classmates were surprised to know when he took a TC.'

'Some rumors got his attention that in GSSS model, XI std teachers never taught well in class and they compelled students to come for private tuitions else they will be given only border marks.'

'It did surprise me too.'

'I have heard from one of his Model school friend that he stood among top five in the school in X.'

'However he dropped out of school after completing XI from RBV for a year to rejoin Model school.'

'It was immediately after his mother's sad demise; he developed a minor heart ailment. The accident had triggered it actually.'

'But for Shubham, the Storms kept coming every year.'

'We don't get everything we desire in life.'

'He always wanted to be a Doctor.'

'He had scored 82% overall in the Senior Secondary examinations.'

'He was among the top 15 candidates to be qualified for the MBBS course but he missed out by 0.6%.'

'He had come this far in the competition yet he was losing the ultimate battle.'

'But his name was on the top in every other course of medicine field-BHMS, BAMS, B.PHARMA etc and he was at third position in the Engineering category.'

'He had told his father that he would go for the BHMS or B.Pharma.'

'Surprisingly and unfortunately the colleges that were supposed to give a final go-ahead for the number of reserved seats, delayed the confirmation.'

'His relatives had mind-washed him and his father that other courses were useless and had very rare scope of getting a government job.'

'In those days it was a matter of pride, if a child wasn't getting MBBS seat, the only option left was Engineering and then to get into rat race for the Govt. jobs.'

According to our society, if you are good at studies, you have just two options - become a doctor or an engineer!

So, if you're not very good at studies, you're lucky!

'You could be anything. Because then, you are free from the burden of expectations.'

'He had opposed his father's and relative's point of view but not enough to make a firm stand.'

'He was forced into Engineering.'

'He went on to join UCE, Burla in Sambalpur-Orrissa but there he started falling sick due to his heart ailment and he could not continue the college.'

'He got confined to the fact that he was too good as a student to join Medicines degree and engineering was like a hell for him.'

'Within a month he had surrendered.'

'He was broken. He was low in confidence.'

'Ultimately he came back dropping out of engineering college.'

'After that he had done degree in computers but never got the chance to study in a regular college.'

'In 2001 he did clear the JIPMER medical entrance but when he got the call letter it was too late-the counseling was over.'

'Quite a tale of hard times and tragedies, Shubham!'

'And to an extent, I agree with you that life would have been different had your family not left the Little Islands.'

* * *

Part 10

W

'MOUMITA'

"His Unfinished-Unfixed Story"

'So you had met Moumita after you were back to the islands?' – Without Moumita, the chapters in his life would have never been completed.

'Yes I met her.'

'I wanted to assure myself that I really loved her and that whatever I felt for her earlier wasn't just a momentary desire.'

'When she was in degree college, I would go and see her often; not necessarily meet her. Nobody had any objection as I always visited the college during lunch intervals.'

'Moumita wasn't that friendly with me. She would reply to my queries as if she was forced to. She was a different girl after she had recovered from the incident.'

'She had become more reserved. But selfishly, I kept trying to make her feel I was there for her.'

'I started noticing more and more of her whenever I skipped my classes to get her one glimpse.'

'I paid attention to every single detail about her- the way she talked, her laughter, her expressions while chatting with friends in the class and hallway.'

'At times I would just glance at her from distance. At times her eyes met mine in close encounters.'

'When you understand that if you fall for some girl but go speechless when you see her facing right into your eyes, no worldly treatment can cure that. What else can you do?'

'Her presence always had given me an inner peace, the peace, which I desperately needed.'

'She was like those raindrops in scorching summer that soothed my body and soul.'

'So I decided to hope. Hope for the better. It didn't take much time to become friendly with her parents, specially with her mother.'

'Occasionally, I started visiting her home, used to chit-chat with her and her parents as well.'

'May be for good reasons, her parents never had objection regarding my visits.'

'Initially, Moumita would refrain herself talking to me both in college and at home. She wouldn't even come out of her room to see me, she wasn't bothered much. Sometimes she would talk to me arrogantly.'

'You know SK; Bong girls are the most beautiful ones when it's about physical appearance.'

'It's not that she possessed the skin-beauty but I liked the way she was. For me it was never about the physical attraction.'

'I loved everything about her. Even if she avoided me at times, it never made be behave differently with her.'

'Two years had gone by like this and still I wasn't sure if I and Moumita shared the bond of friendship.'

'She was in her final year of degree.'

'Neither I knew about her likes and dislikes nor I knew about her feelings for me.'

'Might be she wasn't interested in; what I felt for her.'

'Whenever I tried talking to her she would either pretend to be too busy or she would simply walk away without uttering a word.'

'I could sense that deep inside she was hiding something but I never got a chance to ask her.'

'At times I wondered what I meant for her; just an ex-classmate or an unauthorized friend whom she won't allow to access or share her personal life but at the same time keeping me as an option.'

'We met almost once in a month at her home.'

'I did most of the talking and she would keep the silence listening to me, smiled sometimes and then suddenly she would behave as if I didn't even exist.'

'It made me feel that she never knew how to be polite and behave with friends but I loved her little imperfections.'

"That's what true love is all about- accepting the person even with their flaws, mistakes, giggles and their unlovable side. And a true love not necessarily mean both have to feel the same way or love each other.

'She always occupied my mind whenever I felt alone, whenever I was far away from her.'

'The most beautiful thing about her was her Smile.'

I would die and live thousands life, whenever I saw her heart throbbing smile and kept asking myself, "Will she ever let me to be the reason of truest happiness in her life? Will she ever treat me more than just a friend?"

'At times I felt jealous and possessive when I used to see her talking to the boys in the college ignoring me completely but I never wanted to bind her to my sentiments.'

'She was happy enjoying the freedom and little liberty within limits, she got out of home.'

'There was an unseen bond between me and Moumita which I could feel and she was unaware of.'

'All I wanted from IX was to make good friendship with her.'

'My expectations got wings as soon as I realized how much I loved her but I could never fix it.'

'I was getting consumed by both her absence and presence.'

'The lesser I visited her at home or college, the more I fell in love with her and she had no idea about how deep it was.'

'Might be she knew why an ex-classmate would regularly roam in her college without any other reason but never approached asking me about it.'

'Might be she never wanted to exploit herself with the side effects of being loved.'

'I loved her so much that the idea of proposing her always scared me of losing her.'

'Did you ever propose her or expressed your feelings to her, Shubham?'

'Yes, I did. I had to tell her.

'I did not want to waste any more time. I wanted to see if she thought me, more than a friend.'

'It was her final year in college.'

'One afternoon, I was waiting outside, for the college hours to be over.'

As she reached the exit gate, I interrupted her and said "Moumita" – I need to talk to you. It's important. Shall we walk together to your home?

"What happened, Shubham?"-she asked.

'I can't tell here. Walk along with me.'

She agreed.

We both were silent as we walked slowly towards her home.

Then breaking the silence, I said-"Moumita...I really like you, more than a friend. I have fallen in love with you....more than a friend."

'Moumita stopped. Her face reddened.'

Frowning and looking away from me, she replied-'Shubham, look-you are my good friend. I don't want to answer about this, please.'

'Moumita, we know each other since IX std but hardly we know about each other's likes and dislikes.'

'Inspite of all these, we meet, we talk.'

'May be you know, why I come every day to college; you never told me to stop seeing you. Moumita, you mean so much to me.'

'I really want to know if you feel the same for me.'

'Don't you think we can add a new dimension to our friendship, go one step ahead?'

At this she started walking without answering. I followed her.

'Stop Moumita!' You have to answer.

'You can't always avoid things; you can't avoid me by simply walking away.'

"I need time to reply"- she said and walked away.

I couldn't say a word. "Should I feel happy about her last reply that I can still hope, she will reply positively- I thought". I said to myself- let her go; let her take time as long as she wants.

But "the time" never came.

'After that day, I went three or four times to her home as usual. I never asked anything related to my proposal.'

One day, her mom said, "I know why you come here, Shubham."

'I was not surprised. I always felt her mother could sense the reason for visiting their home frequently.'

I replied-'Aunty, when you know why don't you ask Moumita about it. I really like her. But without her or yours permission I don't want to take next step. Don't you think I am a match for her?'

'Her mother gazed at me. I will discuss with Moumita but listen Shubham- within next two years we might move to Kolkata and we are planning to get Moumita married there.'

'This is was a warning for me.'

'For a moment my dreams of making a life with Moumita had crash landed but I controlled myself and told her mom that I will wait for her reply.'

'But I never got the reply- neither from aunty nor from Moumita.'

Those were early days.

'Love needs unexpected sacrifices.'

Three days later I went to Moumita's home.

'Unfortunately, it was the day when I met Moumita for the final time.'

'She was quite busy at home.'

'I decided to wait.'

I was not willing to quit the last lone battle. I desperately needed to know many things.

'I had to overcome the insecure feeling of losing her.'

'Mou? Come on dear, I know you are pretending to be very busy but I won't go without a final talk with you.' –I shouted. Her mom appeared instantly from the kitchen and said, "why so loud Shubham? Wait! She is coming."

'A few minutes later, she came and sat beside me; dressed in a pink top and a fancy skirt; like the one she wore during the picnic of IX class. She looked so beautiful and fresh like the morning dew drops when the sun shines in the winter.'

'She was silent.'

'You look gorgeous, Mou!'- I complemented.

'Well, I was expecting you will come and fire me up for I shouted on you just now.'

'I was surprised; she was so calm like a placid lake. I had never seen her so composed in the past.'

'Show me your right palm'-Mou insisted me.

As I was going to rest my right hand on the edge of the sofa we occupied, she gripped the thumb of my right hand.

For the first time ever a girl has touched me with her tender hands.

'She wasn't any other girl.'

'She was the one whom I wanted to do so.'

'I felt shivers.' I didn't resist.

'I wished she always held it like the way she did that moment.'

'Fold the thumb, Shubham'-she ordered.

With her eyes still fixed on my folded right thumb, she told, "the letter appears to be 'S'. I predict that either you will marry to someone whose name starts with the letter 'S' or after your marriage someone whose name starts with 'S' will bring lots of happiness in your life which you can't imagine right now."

'Are you kidding me, Mou? When did you become a Palm reader? These things do not work'-I replied in disagreement.

'No Shubham, you have my word and believe me' she reassured with her magical eyes.

'Why can't it be you, Mou? Why not us?'-words were dying as they came out bearing the pain. I sensed and asked myself, 'has she rejected the proposal?'

'Look Shubham!' I don't want to answer.

'I don't have any, for your questioning eyes.'

'Forget me and forgive me please.'

'Someday I will answer all your queries.'

'But for this moment spare me.'

'She looked deeper into my eyes.'

I could sense, she wanted me to leave without asking anything further and I had to leave else I won't be able to let her go; let her be happy with whatever she wanted in life.'

'Take care of yourself and always be happy like this, Mou! This isn't the end rather a beginning. Be in touch. Have a good life. I will see you soon'.

'She stood firm without letting any emotions to slip out of her eyes and she raised her hand with the same smile I loved.'

I never imagined was for the final time I watched her in that verandah in that flat.

'SK!' after chatting with Tisha after 13 years, that day on facebook, she gave me Moumita's number.

I felt like calling her and talk but a fear was forcing me not to go ahead.

'What kind of fear, Shubham?'

'How would she respond? I wasn't aware of her present situation. Will she not be hurt by facing people from her past? Will she even recognize me? Will she not avoid me as she did after my proposal? Will her parents allow Moumita to talk to me?'

'You had lost Piyali-the girl who would have always loved you if she lived on this mother earth but you were unaware of her dedication.'

'You loved Moumita so much yet you had let her go without trying atleast once, to make her feel what she meant for you.'

'What kinda love is this? Why did you mess up things for yourself?'- I asked Shubham while I felt the pain he carried all these years for loving Moumita unconditionally.

'SK, even if she never understood the feelings I had for her, it wasn't the end of faith I had on us together.'

'I never tried hard-for her to want me, make her feel the same way for me as I felt for her, for her to love me in return.'

'Letting her go was never easy for me but I had to.'

'Her happiness meant more than my own selfish desire of having her as a life partner.'

'The love was always a one sided affair between me and Moumita.'

'What I wanted, was to see her always being happy with the decisions she took her life; knowing the tough times she has gone through during schooling and the conflicts of ideas and values she had within her family.'

'I knew she was ruining her life, she wasn't that happy but she was never ready to share her problems with anyone.'

It's not that she did not have friends but she was never a good speaker within herself nor to her friends. The pain she had in layers been deeper and thicker that I could feel in her eyes whenever they met mine.'

'Gathering courage, one day I had left a message for her; "Moumita, how are u doing? How about your parents?" There wasn't any reply from her for next three days. Again, I had resent the message and her reply left me in tears.'

'What did she say, Shubham?'

Her message read-"after so many years, today and now I understand, when someone loves the other and that person goes beyond our reach with no imprints of him or her left behind to trace, that pain is so much, I understood today. Please be happy always. I realized everything very late. I hope you will understand my pain"

'SK, I don't know whom she referred to but my heart said, Moumita was carrying a never ending pain'.

'Did she refuse my proposal because she had someone in her life that time and now is she regretting for not answering my proposal?'-my instincts were forcing me to ask her but I left it on time and Moumita to answer this.'

'What did you reply, Shubham?'

'I had no words to console her as I wasn't sure if she was feeling the pain because she took me for granted and rejected my proposal or whether she was trying to tell me something else.'

'But I was unable to control my emotions after hearing her voice when she called on my number one day me to talk.'

'That day I told her everything which she never knew about.'

'I tried to reassure her, we can be good friends always.'

'She had told me that, she can't continue friendship with me because then her past will keep coming back irritating her.'

'May be I was an irritating subject for her. May be she has some repentance.'

'You know SK, the day I had left IX std from the little islands, rest of my classmates went for a picnic. I missed that enjoyment.'

'A month later, one of my classmate, sent me the picnic photos.'

'I had specifically mentioned to get the girls gang photo from the picnic.'

When I received it, I had shown it to my mother and pointing to Moumita in that picture I said, "Maa, I want to make friendship with this girl, I like her". Maa replied rather cautioned me, "if you like some girl and later if you fall for her, be ready to struggle and bear the pain in love if it turns out to be one-sided". I didn't reply her back.

'SK, I never was a part of her private and personal life. Nor we had any affair ever.'

'Then how the hell I remind her of her past every time?'

This question was killing me and I asked her the same question one day but she never replied.

'She started avoiding me again. I had a gut feeling that she was confused too, if to keep this so called friendship or break away and on 07 Dec 2016, she had bid a goodbye to me through a message.'

'If we remain bonded by friendship, my past will keep haunting me. Better we keep ourselves out of touch'.-that was her message.

Shubham had lots of answers to get from Moumita.

Shubham's professional commitment brought him to Kolkata in 2017 and to his luck, Moumita had also asked him to meet for once.

Moumita had to settle few things and that's why even after she decided not to be in touch with Shubham, she actually was, indirectly.

Avni and Shubham regularly inquired about her well being so as Moumita about them.

Sometimes she would reply and sometimes she ignored.

But more than Moumita, Shubham desperately needed only one answer; there were many decisions in Shubham's life which were aftermath of Moumita's disappearance in the year 2005.

'At the Rene towers-on the busy streets of East Township, South Kolkata, he waited for two-long hours, outside the entrance in cold keeping his eyes focused on the exit door.'

As soon as the office got closed, Moumita came towards him and she repeated the same thing; "Better we both not be in touch ever. We both will get hurt"

'As she spoke her lips shivered, eyes appeared heavy.'

Shubham realized that her heart mind and the arguments were not in sync but he listened patiently and promised her that she will never hear from him again but when Shubham asked her, "why she thought that only he, reminded of her past and not Tisha and others as all of them were friends from the same school?"

Moumita didn't answer and again she walked away bidding a final goodbye.

'Shubham tried to regain strength has tears let him in complete darkness on those luminous streets of Rene towers.'

"This world is not enough to engulf the pain of the scar that Piyali and Moumita has left in Shubham's life from the past and the past is not enough to instigate a rein of dark hours in his present. Shubham is a self-motivated person. I know he will survive this storm too."

"Sometimes it is better to leave some stories at that point where one feels that even if one sided, true love is always immortal."

"My love for Moumita has a separate space that Avni only understood and Moumita could never. She always walked away leaving behind everything unfinished and unfixed. Today I have a lovable and supportive family. I am well settled. I have earned respect and affection of industry people. When Moumita had left, I tried searching her in 2008 in Kolkata twice but I wasn't successful".

My efforts went in vain.

One night at the Baruipur railway station was horrible because I had a clue that Moumita's family lived in that area but later I came to know it was a wrong address.

I left my IT job in depression in 2008. In Jan 2009 there was pressure from my relatives and father to get married.

My father was ageing. By 2008 end, I lost hope and faith in myself that I will never be able to search

Moumita and what if she had got married by then".

'So I decided to get married. One day I met Avni, 5feet tall-brownish complexion-polite girl.'

'On the very first meeting, I had asked her if she would marry me because I had a mindset after unable to find Moumita that I don't want girlfriend-boyfriend scenes. I want a true, lovable, understanding life partner who will always be with me during my hard times, who will always be my strength and I will be able to give her place and space she will expect from me as a husband.'

'And Avni is that blessing of my present apart from my professional achievements.'

Does Moumita, ever regret for rejecting Shubham's proposal in college days? That; only Moumita has the answer. Moumita still remains a mystery, the unfixed love of Shubham.

Moumita could never gather courage to face Shubham. If she wanted to, she could have erased Shubham out of her mind many years back itself. She didn't. For good or bad reasons, but she remembers everything about Shubham from her past.

Will she ever disclose the truth? Only time will tell. But Moumita still remains his one sided-unfixed love and how deep it is that only Shubham and Avni knows.

-"I thought I have moved on and time will heal the wound that I carried since Moumita eloped but it was myth. I knew Moumita never loved me, but then she never forgot me too and that one feeling is enough for me to keep moving in life with a ripple of hope that someday she will feel that 'True Love Is Immortal and that Believing in Hope can do wonders leading to a blessed present.'

"Time travels, Time heals but Time has left me with her memories forever."

But on the other side of coin, if Piyali and Moumita had not been in my life in the past, I would have never met 'Avni'-my blessed present.

* * *
Epilogue

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Shubham is a well known figure in Airline Industry especially in the islands. Despite his failures, he has achieved respect from everybody, not only in Airline but IT industry too because of his hardworking attitude, his self belief and faith on time and that he believe in hope. Although he regrets for leaving the RedHat Job in 2006 because of his heart ailment, he never looked back.

He achieved internationally recognized and appreciated IATA certification with distinction in 2012. He is happy being with his small professional life and his family.

He always thanks to those who had left him or criticized him badly once in past. His failure in love life and few illogical and impractical decisions in the early stages of his career do let him down but the lessons from those failures only made him a better and stronger person.

When nobody supported him, he had self motivated himself. But he remained focused and inspired in some or the other way. He believed in his own abilities. More than that, he believed in hope and hard work.

He has come off the ages now. He always says, whatever Piyali wished for me, came true. And whatever Moumita didn't feel, Avni did.

Avni has given Shubham reason to smile that he had lost in the past. Avni has given him the reason to survive among tragedies.

Avni is a true life partner and I feel he is blessed to have Avni as his soulmate.

* * *

# harsh situations, tough challenges in the past thrown towards you can end up being Blessings for the present only if you have the composure, focus, will power and attitude to get inspired and move on in life no matter what. Every storm is temporary. Learn from the Past to build a blessed present #

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THANK YOU!

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Readers,

For connecting with this and reading the story.

This is my first attempt in storytelling. And without your support it won't be possible to move ahead and write the next one, to write something inspiring again.

Do share your feedback.

Connect to me on Facebook:

@storytellingSK.

Thank You All!

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Acknowledgements

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Foremost, a special thanks to 'S. Kanagapriya', for tossing up the idea to write something inspiring.

I would like to sincerely and heartily express my gratitude to my schooldays friends; Sekher, Karthik, Shajeeda, Shanti, Chitra, Arya, Vinod, Abhilash, Vidya and Prem, who stood by me and kept encouraging me to keep writing at my first attempt.

I specially thank those people from the past who had left from my life at most unexpected times when I needed them the most, making me a stronger and better person.

Thanks to those who provided support, offered comments to help finish this book.

I want to heartily thank my family, my wife Jostna and my best friends Biswajit & Sekher and a special thanks to Pihu, who kept inspiring and believed in me that I can write a Tale from Real Life.

I sincerely and specially thank my childhood friend-Rajshree who helped a lot me in completing this story. Without her, the story would have remain an unfinished tale.

Most importantly, I want to thank Ms. Savi Sharma; the author of "Everyone Has A Story" who inspired me to write this story.

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