 
# Alayna

### By

### Amber Ivers

### SMASHWORDS EDITION

### *****

### PUBLISHED BY:

### Amber Ivers

### Alayna

### Copyright 2012 by Amber Ivers

### Cover Art by Kaylee McGill

### Smashwords Edition License Notes

### This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share with. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy.

Thank you for respecting the author's work.

# Chapter 1: The Fire

### April 26, 1997

What does a seven year old have to do to get some peace and quiet? This last week was a mess. Daddy's always busy trying to fix some stupid machine. Everyone knows that you can't go to the future. I bet Meril gets something cool for his birthday. We're best friends, sort of, and his mom is almost like my mother. Meril's lucky that he has one. Grammy and Pappy are there for me, I guess, but I have to come to the cemetery to talk to my mom.

"Hi, Mom! I came to tell you what Daddy got me for my birthday. You know those little balls that have different colored lights? He said that it used to be yours. I guess he took you to a pizza place with games. He told me that you were the master at skee ball. So, I have something of yours, which is cool, but I really wanted a bike."

"Alayna, are you here?" Meril yelled.

"Yes, why?"

"Do you want to play with me?"

"No. I want some peace and quiet. This is why I came out here by myself."

Meril came to sit by me and I glowered at him. He didn't seem to notice or to even care what I thought.

"Why?" he asked as he sat down.

"You." I replied hotly.

He looked at me startled. "What did I do?" he pouted.

I couldn't believe that he was acting like he didn't do anything. I know he knew. He's the reason that I left and I am so sad right now. He's the reason that I am sad about my gift.

"Why did you leave the party? Your dad seemed upset. Grammy wouldn't let him come get you."

I ignored him and sat staring at my mother's grave site. She had died the day that I was born seven years ago. Daddy would take me here every year after I was born. We live with my grandparents so Daddy can go to work and to school. He also needs time to work on his stupid machine. Uncle Allen, Meril's dad, comes over and helps sometimes. Uncle Allen is going to be a doctor. Meril thinks that his dad is cooler than mine. He told me so right before I left.

"Fine, be a pouty baby. I'm leaving!" Meril stomped off.

When he was far enough away from me, I muttered, "Who's the one stomping like a baby?" I know that I shouldn't have let him get to me like that, but I couldn't help it.

"I'm sorry Mom. He was so mean to me today. Grammy threw me a party today. Bernie, Charlie, Barbara, Richard, Grammy, Pappy, Daddy, Meril, Aunt Linda, Uncle Allen, my friend Betty, and my best friend Carly were all there. Grammy made me a beautiful princess cake. She said that it was hard to make because no princesses can be more beautiful than me." I smiled when I thought about that. It made me feel really pretty.

"But, I told Grammy, no-one can be prettier than her. Even with gray hair, she looks like an angel. Anyway, after Daddy gave me my present, Meril laughed at me. He said it was the ugliest thing that he ever saw. I tried to ignore him. I was just excited that I got something of yours. Betty and Carly gave me Barbies. Grammy sent them home because they got into a fight."

I yawned and decided that I was going to lie down beside her headstone. It felt cold compared to the sun. I lay there a few minutes before I continued to tell here about my party.

"The rest of the stuff was only cards with a dollar or two in there. Not even enough for me to get the bike that I wanted. Then Meril decides to pick on me. He says that Daddy is crazy and has his dad doing something stupid. He says that's why Richard hasn't been here. His dad told him all about when he grew up. Daddy never tells me anything, Mommy. He is always too busy. Grammy says that it's only because he still misses you. I miss you, too! It's not fair! When Meril told me that was why I've never met Bernie or Charlie before, I called him a liar. He just laughed at me and said that Daddy didn't care enough about me to get me a real present. That hurt my feelings, Mommy. He's supposed to be my bestest friend and he was mean to me."

I couldn't stop crying now. Telling Mommy made me remember how bad it hurt. If he comes over here, I'm just going to hit him in the nose. I better not tell Mommy that because she might tell the angels that I am naughty. I hope she tells the angels that Meril is being naughty to me. He is being a big fat meanie! I laid there and thought about Meril, Daddy, and my birthday present and cried.

I woke up to the feeling of being carried. When I opened my eyes, Daddy was carrying me. He must have felt me move because he looked down and smiled.

"Did you have a good nap, Baby Girl?"

"What time is it, Daddy?"

"It's only 2:30pm. Meril said that you were upset about something and that you wouldn't come to play with him."

"He said that you were crazy and that you didn't love me. That's why you didn't bother getting me a present. He knew that I wanted a bike."

"You know that's not true. He's only teasing you, Honey. Why would you let him do that to you?"

"He's a big meanie, Daddy! Do I have to play with him?"

"Alayna Marie, I told you not to talk about anybody like that. Besides, you two are best friends. You'll change your mind. What I am working on is something that we thought about doing together. I don't know how long it will be before it is finished but we will finish it. You were only asleep for an hour; do you want to finish your nap?"

"No, I want to go play."

Daddy set me down and gave me a soft kiss on the forehead. "Okay, no more fighting."

"Okay, Daddy!" I skipped away to my room. I stopped when I saw Meril playing with my Barbies.

"What are you doing in here?" I asked grumpily.

"You're my friend. I want to play."

"Not today, you're my cousin. Daddy says that I can't call you names, but I want to. You were mean about my Daddy and you made me think that he loved his stupid machine more than me."

"I'm not taking it back. You call it stupid too." Meril said with an air of defiance.

I rolled my eyes and muttered, "It's not the same thing." When he didn't say anything else, I plopped down on my bed.

"Do you want to play with me now?" he asked hopefully.

"Why? Do you want to play Barbies with me?"

"Eww. No, Barbies are for girls. Let's play the super Nintendo."

"I play first!" I jumped up and ran into the kitchen. "Grammy, can Meril and I play games?"

She didn't say anything for a minute and I thought that she was going to say no.

"Please!" I asked with a pout.

"No fighting!" she said.

"Oh, thank you Grammy!" I ran up to her and gave her a hug and a kiss. "You're the best!"

"I don't understand you kids today." she said shaking her head.

By the time that I got into the living room, Meril was already setting up the game. Pappy was watching him with interest.

"Here, Alayna, it's ready."

Meril and I took turns playing for a couple of hours before Aunt Linda came to pick up Meril.

"Mommy, you're back!" Meril hollered. He jumped up and gave her a hug.

"Whoa! Little one, did you have fun while I was gone?" she asked Meril.

"Yeah, Alayna and I have been playing games!"

Aunt Linda laughed and looked over to Pappy. "Looks like you helped Pappy take a nap!" she looked at me and said, "Alayna, I have something to show you. Can you please come with me?"

I jumped up, excited, and asked, "Where, Aunt Linda?"

She took off and led me to the garage. Before I got to the door, she stopped me.

"Before you go in there, I need to tell you something. This is from all of us, even your Daddy. Ok?"

I gave her a bright smile and I was vibrating with excitement. She smiled back and opened the door. In the garage, Daddy was standing beside Uncle Allen. Behind them was a 42 inch bike with a basket, kick stand, and pink and white pom pons. I shrieked with excitement and ran over to the bike. Grammy and Pappy came into the garage with smiles on their faces.

"Oh, thank you! It's exactly what I wanted."

I gave each of them, except for Meril, a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"I know that you were upset because I didn't get this earlier, but we had to wait for it to come in." Daddy said.

"They called while you were away, so I went to go pick it up. I had to go run some errands, anyway." Aunt Linda said.

"I'm glad that you like it, but it is time for dinner. You can test it out tomorrow." Grammy said.

"Awww!" I whined as I looked at the bike longingly.

Everyone laughed and said their goodbyes to each other. I forgot all about the bike when I smelled the fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and the watermelon. I went to grab a piece of watermelon and Grammy slapped my hand.

"You know better, Alayna. Sit down at the table."

"I'm sorry, Grammy." I sat down at the table and waited.

After we ate, I took a bath and we watched a movie. I wasn't ready to go to bed but Daddy told me that I had to. When Daddy left, I grabbed the spinning ball with lights and plugged it in. I used the light to see my book that I was reading.

### April 27, 1997

I woke up to feeling my arm being burned.

"Ow!"

I sat up real quick and saw that I had fallen asleep while reading. The globe of light had fallen over and was melting. Melting? That's when I noticed that my mattress was on fire and so was my book!

"Daddy! Daddy!" I yelled.

I didn't know what time it was, but as I hollered out his name, my sheets caught fire. I ran out of the room screaming, "Daddy, my beds on fire! Daddy!"

I saw him run out of his room. "What did you say?"

"My room is on fire. Help me!"

"Run outside, Alayna. Right now! Go next door and wake the neighbors. Tell them to call 911. Stay there, Alayna."

"Yes, Daddy!"

I took off outside, crying, and ran to the neighbors. I knocked on the door as hard as I could and looked at my house while I waited. My room was in full flames and I didn't see my Daddy, Grammy, or Pappy. The neighbors didn't answer so I ran to the next one. I knocked on that one in a panic. When they answered, I didn't even need to tell them what was wrong. I saw my Daddy carrying Grammy out of the house. I went to run over to him, but my neighbor grabbed me.

"Hold on, Sweetie. Help is coming. You can't go over there right now."

"That's my Daddy! Let me go!"

Just as I said that, my neighbor made a gasp and said, "What does he think that he is doing?"

I could hear the sirens in the background and I turned to see what she was talking about. Daddy wasn't there. I started searching for him but I couldn't find him anywhere. As the fire trucks pulled up, I noticed that Grammy wasn't moving. Then Daddy came out carrying Pappy, but he fell as soon as he was out of the house. I struggled against my neighbor but I couldn't get out. I heard her punching the buttons on her phone.

"Linda, this is Rachel. You need to get to the hospital. Linda, calm down. There is nothing that you can do here. There's been a fire."

I didn't hear the rest of the conversation because I had finally gotten free. I ran towards my house and, just as I was about to cross the yard, someone grabbed a hold of my arm.

"Hold on there, Lil' Miss." he said. "Where do you think that you're going?"

"Let me go!" I screamed. "Daddy! Daddy! Grammy! Pappy!"

I struggled hard against the police officer, but I couldn't move.

"Calm down, Lil' Miss. Is this your house?" I nodded. "How old are you?"

"Seven." I answered lazily. "What's wrong with Daddy?" I asked.

"I don't know what is wrong, Lil' Miss." He grabbed a hold of my upper arm and took his attention away from me. "Rhonda, come and take this kid. This is her house."

Rhonda looked at me sadly. When she reached me, she knelt down and gave me a hug. "In a minute, we are going to go for a ride. We are going to take you to where your Daddy is going. Okay?"

I nodded my head and she walked me to her patrol car. She shut the door and walked over to the ambulance that had just arrived. I watched out of the back window as they loaded my Daddy into the ambulance. Grammy and Pappy were being covered in white sheets. Rhonda wasn't in the car, so I couldn't ask why they weren't going to the hospital with us. The ambulance took off with Daddy and I laid on the backseat to wait for Rhonda. I must have fallen asleep because I woke up to Rhonda moving me. We were at the hospital. I could see the bright lights above us and hear an ambulance not too far away.

"Hey, Honey. What's your name?" Rhonda asked.

"Alayna." I said shyly.

"Okay, Alayna. We are going to go in the hospital and sit outside the door, where your Daddy is. But we can't go in there until the doctors say so, okay?"

I nodded and we headed into the hospital. She took me to a room where doctors and nurses were running around. There were about five doors lined down the wall. We stopped at the third one. They already had chairs sitting in front of the door. Rhonda sat me down on one of the chairs and went to talk to the nurse. She didn't look happy as she headed back to me. Rhonda knelt down in front of me.

"Sweetie, we won't be able to see your Daddy tonight. He's very sick and needs his rest. Your Aunt Linda is on her way, so we will sit here and wait for her, okay?"

Tears filled my eyes as I nodded. Rhonda gave me a hug before she moved her chair closer to me. She wrapped me up in her arms and slowly stroked my hair. I closed my eyes and waited for Aunt Linda to show up.

I could tell when she made it because I could hear Meril whining down the hall. I didn't have the energy to move, even when I heard them running to me. Aunt Linda wrapped me up into her arms while Uncle Allen was talking to the doctors. I was confused about why Aunt Linda and Uncle Allen had to come and get me. I only saw Daddy being brought to the hospital. Where were Grammy and Pappy?

"Can I go home now, Aunt Linda? Grammy and Pappy are probably worried." I asked.

Aunt Linda looked over to Uncle Allen, who shook his head. "No, sweetheart, we can't take you there. You need your rest. We'll talk in the morning."

Uncle Allen grabbed me from Aunt Linda and carried me to the car. "Rest now, Little One. I'm going to stay here with your Daddy tonight and you can see him when you get up."

He gave me a kiss on the tip of the nose, closed my door, and went back in. Meril hopped into the back of the car. He looked interested in something but I was too tired to ask.

"So, what was it like?" he asked.

"What was what like?"

"The fire." he asked. The way he said it sounded like there should have been a 'duh' at the end of it.

"Scary, but I only saw my room on fire. I think it was my ..." I stopped because I realized that it was all my fault.

"What?"

I didn't even get to say anything because Aunt Linda got in. "Leave her alone, Meril."

"Aw, man!" Meril whined.

"Stuff it!" Aunt Linda snapped.

Meril sat back hard and crossed his arms. I laid back down and cried myself to sleep. When we arrived at my cousin's house, it was daylight. The glint of sunlight caught my eyes and woke me up. My face felt sticky and nasty. I sat up and saw Meril lying beside me. Aunt Linda turned the car off and turned around to look at me.

"Good morning, Sweetie! Let's get you inside so you can get some real rest."

"I've already slept, Aunt Linda. I want to see Daddy."

"No, honey, it may seem like you had sleep, but really you didn't."

"It's morning already." I complained.

"It was morning when the fire started, Honey. The police are going to want to know what happened and I want you to get some rest."

Aunt Linda looked so serious that I decided she was right. I climbed out of the car and waited by the door, while Aunt Linda lifted Meril out of the car. He never even woke up, even when she shifted to unlock the door. My aunt's house was a little bit smaller than my Grammy's and there were only two rooms. Aunt Linda put Meril in his room and took me to her bed. She gave me a kiss on the forehead and left.

I heard her talking to someone on the phone. I couldn't hear what she was saying and the yawn told me that I was too tired to listen so I closed my eyes. Aunt Linda came to wake me up for lunch. I had horrible dreams about Daddy and when I saw her face, I jumped out of bed.

"Whoa! Sweetie! You need to slow down." Aunt Linda said while grabbing a hold of me. "You need to take a bath before lunch because we are going to pick up your Daddy."

"Really?" I was so excited that I ran to the bathroom and started the water without a second glance back.

"You forgot your clothes." Aunt Linda said smiling.

She came in the bathroom with my clothes and made sure the water wasn't too hot. She left the bathroom and shut the door. I could hear her getting Meril out of bed and pulling out his clothes. I hurriedly washed my hair and made sure that I was completely clean. I grabbed my clothes, threw them on, and ran to the kitchen. Aunt Linda had made us some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with barbeque chips on the side. I ate them almost as fast as I took a bath. While Meril and Aunt Linda ate, I brushed my hair and pulled into a tight ponytail. We left shortly after I was finished.

Daddy was waiting for us, but he was in a wheelchair. I was so nervous that he was hurt really bad and I couldn't get myself out of the car fast enough. Daddy stood up and held his hands out to me so I ran into them. I started coughing when I smelled the smoke.

"Alayna, I'm so glad that you're okay." Daddy said into my hair.

"Daddy, I was so worried about you! Can you go home now?"

"No, honey, the house is ruined." He looked like he wanted to say more, but he didn't. I noticed Uncle Allen standing against the wall crying.

"Daddy what's wrong with Uncle Allen?" I asked guiltily.

"I will explain this to you a little later, honey. Right now is not the best time." He gave me a kiss on the cheek then he put me back into the car.

I was so glad that Daddy was beside me that I forgot all about Grammy and Pappy. I heard Meril ask but nobody answered. I laid my head on Daddy's shoulder and heard him talking about smoke inhalation, whatever that means. When we arrived at Aunt Linda's, Daddy took us into the living room. He held me to his side and waited for everyone else to sit down. Meril looked at Daddy with confusion. Uncle Allen looked down but wouldn't look up at anyone. Uh oh! I knew something was wrong. My leg started bouncing with nervousness. I looked over at Daddy and noticed that he was crying too.

"Daddy, what's wrong?" That's when I remembered Grammy and Pappy. "Daddy where is Grammy and Pappy?" I asked.

It wasn't Daddy who answered. "They didn't make it, Alayna."

I looked over to Aunt Linda. "They didn't make what?"

Daddy grabbed a hold of my shoulders but, before he could answer, Meril stood up and shouted, "You killed them, Alayna. You and your stupid birthday present. It's your fault and I _HATE_ you!" Then he stomped out of the room.

Aunt Linda stood up and ran after him. "Meril that is unfair. You get back out there and apologize to your cousin."

"NO!" he slammed his door shut and she went in after him.

"Daddy, what does he mean 'I killed them'?"

"You didn't kill anybody, Alayna. It's not your fault. Grammy and Pappy died in the fire."

It took a second for me to understand but, when I did, I sunk into myself. Meril was right. I did kill them. I jumped up and ran outside. I ran to the side of the house and sat against the wall. I heard someone walk out the front door but they didn't holler for me, so I ignored it. I wished that I was at my house so that I could walk to my mom's grave. Even though she wasn't really alive, it helped me to be able to talk to her. I heard slow footsteps approach me and I sat there waiting. I saw daddy's shoes and looked up to see his sorrowful expression.

"I'm sorry Daddy. I didn't mean to kill them." I could barely see his face through my tears.

Daddy sat down and slid down the wall to join me. "Alayna, it is important for you to know that it is not your fault."

"But I.."

Daddy stopped me before I could finish. "I know that you fell asleep with your disco ball. I saw you and I was going to move it but when I tried, you sort of pouted. I didn't...if I had known; I would have turned it off. I should have moved your book. None of this..." he stopped to make sure that I was looking. "None of this is your fault. Understand?"

I nodded, even though I wasn't sure what he was talking about. He held me tightly and sang me a little tune. It was a soft melody that was very soothing. I would have fallen asleep, if Daddy didn't stop.

"Your Mom used to sing that to you every night, to put you to bed."

"Momma died when I was born, Daddy." I said confused.

"Well, yes, of course she did. What I meant was every night, while you were in her belly. You were very active at night and it put you to sleep. It was almost like you could hear her sing to you. She knew that you were a girl. She said that this song was more of a girlie song."

He went back to singing the song and I listened to it until it calmed me down.

"Tomorrow we will go back to the house and get some clothes for the funeral and check to see what is not ruined. Do you want to stay here with Aunt Linda and Meril instead?"

"Yes, I don't want to go back to that house."

I shivered as I thought about looking at the house after the fire.

"Alright. Let's go inside. Uncle Allen and I are going to prepare for the funeral. I may be gone for a few days afterword. I need to find us a new place to live."

"No, Daddy. I want to go with you."

"We'll talk about that later, okay?"

"Okay, Daddy."

He stood up and helped me to my feet. I gave him a quick hug and we went back into the house. Meril was still in his room but Aunt Linda gave me a hug and told me that she was sorry. I didn't know what else to do, so I sat down and watched the TV. Aunt Linda changed it to cartoons and left with Daddy to talk in their bedroom. I couldn't really pay attention to the cartoons though. I didn't really understand what was going on and it didn't help that I kept thinking about Grammy and Pappy.

Meril wouldn't leave his room and Aunt Linda wouldn't let me go in. When Daddy was finished making plans, he turned on The Little Mermaid for me. He sang all the songs to me and I felt good for a few hours. Daddy bought us some KFC for dinner and talked about the conversation with the police. Apparently, that was not the first time that the disco ball, as Daddy called it, caught fire. Meril didn't believe Daddy and went back to his room. I felt bad because Meril's face was really puffy and he sounded like he could barely breathe. Daddy and I slept on the couch bed. I was glad when he was there to keep me from screaming when I dreamed of the fire.

"Shh. It's okay, sweetheart. It's alright, you're safe." Daddy said.

I lay back down and Daddy sang the tune that Mommy used to sing to me. I fell asleep before long and didn't have another dream for the rest of the night.

### April 28, 1997

I woke up to Daddy making pancakes. He was already dressed to go back to the house. My heart fell as I realized that Grammy and Pappy were no longer alive. I started crying and closed my eyes as I cried myself back to sleep. When I woke up, Daddy was already back from the house. He held up a black dress with blue flowers wrapped around the waist.

"None of your clothes survived so I went and bought this one for you. What do you think?"

"Oh, Daddy! It's beautiful!"

"The funeral is tomorrow morning. I'm going to go find a motel for us to sleep in tonight. Do you want to come? I bought you some clothes. If you want to come, go get dressed. The bag is in Aunt Linda's room."

I jumped up off the couch bed and ran into the bedroom. There was a really pretty yellow dress that I picked out. I threw it on and put on my flip flops then ran to my Daddy.

"Are you ready to go?" Daddy asked.

"Yes, Let's go!"

After a few hours, we finally found a Holiday Inn that we could stay at. Daddy unloaded our stuff out of the car and I went to play in the room. After Daddy was finished unloading, he handed me a bathing suit to swim in. We ate lunch in the Mexican restaurant, inside of Holiday Inn, wearing only our bathing suits. We swam for a few hours before Daddy decided to use their work out room and I played the Pacman game while waiting for him to finish. When he was finished, we went back to our room. Daddy took a shower while I got dressed to go eat. I was so full by the time we arrived back at the hotel that I fell asleep before I could change into my pajamas.

### April 29, 1997

Daddy woke me up early in the morning so I could take a bath and get ready for the funeral. After we were dressed, Daddy took us to McDonald's and to a flower shop. I picked out a few roses and Daddy picked out a whole back seat of flowers. We were the first ones to arrive and I watched as Daddy set up all the flowers. I stayed in the lobby, though because I was too scared to go in there. When everyone arrived, the service began.

I didn't understand anything that the preacher was saying. When everyone got loaded up, I noticed that half of the neighborhood was there. It felt like forever before we arrived at the cemetery. We passed Mommy's grave on the way there and I prayed a prayer to her.

"Mommy, please help me. I don't feel so well." I pleaded.

Of course, Mommy couldn't really help me but I felt some sort of comfort. It didn't last long because the realization that I was never going to see them again hit me. I started swaying and trembling and I felt someone grab my hand. I slowly calmed down and looked to see who it was. I was shocked to see that Meril was standing beside me. He was crying but when he noticed me looking, he wrapped his arms around me in a hug. I returned it and realized that some of my tension was from Meril being upset with me. As we watched Grammy and Pappy being buried, holding onto each other, we comforted each other. I handed one of my roses to Meril. He threw his on Pappy's grave and I threw mine on Grammy's. We watched as everyone but our families left. Uncle Allen, Aunt Linda, and Daddy were talking to each other. Meril gave me a quick hug.

"I'm sorry, Alayna." Meril said.

"It's okay, Meril."

We sat staring at their graves while tears fell down our faces.

"Goodbye, Grammy and Pappy." we said together.

I walked away from them and sat in front of Mommy's grave. Meril watched me leave, but he didn't come with me.

"Mommy, I'm sorry. I left your ball on when I fell asleep and now Grammy and Pappy are coming to join you. Take care of them for me and tell them that I love them. Tell them that I am sorry for hurting them. I guess Daddy was able to save his time machine. They are going to rebuild the house, so Daddy and I will be staying at the Holiday Inn. It's fun but I'm going to miss talking to you every day. I love you, Mommy! Oh! Daddy sang me the song that you used to sing to me."

I stopped talking because I heard footsteps. I looked up and saw Daddy standing behind me. He sat down beside me and held me in his arms.

"I love you too, Daddy!"

We sat there holding each other while Daddy sang to me. I listened with my head on his shoulder until tiredness overcame me.

# Chapter 2: Bullies

### December 20, 2004

Christmas vacation is coming. I can't wait for this day to end. My cousin Meril and I are going to the mall. Aunt Linda is going to watch a movie while we hang out with our friends. There is only one problem; Meril's current girlfriend. Rebecca is never nice to me but she has kept quiet since her and Meril started going out. I was skeptical at doing this but not enough to keep me from going to the mall with excitement.

I glanced up at the clock and it was only 2:45p.m. I'm already finished with my work. History was my favorite subject, especially the Eastern Hemisphere. I love learning about the King's and Queen's. Of course, what girl doesn't day dream about being a princess? I sat and thought about what I was going to get Meril for Christmas. He has wanted to get a basketball goal for two years. Daddy and I are going to get him one.

Thinking about Daddy made me think about the mall again. I plan on looking for his gift at the mall. I'm not sure what I want to buy him, yet. I thought about buying him a really nice watch but I'm not really sure if he will like it. While I was thinking of Daddy's gift, the bell rung. I jumped up out of the chair, grabbed my books, and rushed to my locker. Meril and Rebecca were waiting for me.

"Hey, Alayna, are you ready?" Rebecca asked in her fake friendly tone.

How could Meril not hear it? I asked myself while replying, "I guess." toning down my excitement.

"Good. Mom's waiting for us." Meril replied.

We took off towards Aunt Linda's car and she looked really anxious. Meril gave the front seat to Rebecca so I climbed hurriedly into the back. Meril smiled at me as I got in but it was a nervous smile so I ignored him. We were at the mall before I could even think about where I wanted to go.

"Okay, kids, I will be back here at five thirty. Have fun!" Aunt Linda said as she gave us each a kiss.

"Aw; only two hours. I hope that I can find something for Daddy fast enough." I complained after she left.

"You'll be fine, Alayna. See you at five thirty." Meril said.

Rebecca just looked at me and smiled but the look in her eye made me curious. I left without saying another word. I looked back after a few paces and Meril was buying Rebecca a drink. I took the opportunity to slip from their sight while Rebecca wasn't looking.

The first store that I came to was a shoe store. I didn't see anything that I thought Daddy would find interesting so I went next door to the clothing store. The clothing store took me forever to go through. I didn't find anything interesting in it either. I found an antique store on the bottom level and decided to look in there.

The store had several things that I found interesting but I only had a certain amount of money. Daddy was smart and worked for the government on scientific stuff so it was really hard for me to know what to buy. I don't really know what he would like but I was sure that I would be able to find it here. I got disappointed when I didn't see anything.

Just as I was about to leave, I noticed a little capsule made out of metal. When I looked closer, it was supposed to be a time machine. Daddy was working on a time machine with Uncle Allen and I thought that he would like this. When I went to purchase it, I noticed a pocket watch made out of gold. I decided to grab both of them and I left the shop happy.

With the Christmas shopping done, I decided to grab a drink and a couple of cookies. When I turned around to go sit somewhere, someone ran into me.

"Oops. Sorry!" Rebecca's friend, Tiffany, exclaimed.

The other three girls around her laughed. I knew that it wasn't by accident but I couldn't really do anything about it. These girls don't like me because I refused to hang out with them. Of course, it is obvious why I wouldn't, to me, but everyone else thinks that I am crazy. Now, I get picked on every time that I turn around.

"No problem, Tiffany." I said. I don't know why this made her angrier, but it did.

"You better watch yourself, Alayna." Tiffany said as she stomped off.

The rest of the girls followed her like lost puppy dogs. I still had thirty minutes before Aunt Linda came back, so I went outside. If I knew what was coming, I would not have left from inside. Out of nowhere, I felt my hair being pulled. I went to turn around but the grip got tighter and I was being pulled into a service door. I saw Samantha, one of Rebecca's friends, as I was being yanked around.

"I hear that you're telling Meril about what I've done to you." I heard Rebecca say.

"Where's Meril?" I asked shocked.

"Oh, we got separated when Tiffany said hello a second ago. We saw you come out here."

"Hello, again, Alayna." Tiffany said.

"Meril won't let you do this to me." I said. I heard all the girls laugh.

"Who's gonna tell?" Rebecca asked.

Before I could answer, she shoved me forward. I turned around to say something but was stopped by a fist in my gut. All the air left my lungs in a rush.

"That's for talking about me." Rebecca said.

Then I felt a kick in the back of my knees and I went down with a loud groan.

"That's for earlier." Tiffany replied.

"Stop!" I cried. I couldn't help the tears that were sliding down my face. "Why are you doing this to me? Because I won't join your little gang?"

No, it's because we can." Tiffany laughed.

I went to stand up and Rebecca kicked me in the shoulder. When I fell, she held me down with her foot.

"Stay still. We'll be done soon." Rebecca said. There was so much menace in her voice that it sent chills down my spine.

When I struggled to get up, Tiffany came over and grabbed Daddy's presents off my arm. I tried to keep her from grabbing it but I couldn't. She strode off and out the door and Rebecca picked me up and took me outside. I couldn't stop crying because all I could think about was Tiffany taking off with Daddy's presents.

"Please, give that back." I pleaded.

"What? These?" Tiffany asked.

"Yes. Please. They are for my Daddy."

"Oooh! Your Daddy." she laughed. "Well, okay here you go."

She reached over to hand it to me and, just before I grabbed it, she dropped it. I heard something break and they started laughing. I dropped down and grabbed the bag. The pocket watch had shattered but the time machine was still intact.

"Rebecca?" I heard a familiar voice say. I was too sad to even look up.

I saw Rebecca spin around on the edge of my vision. "Meril!" she yelled in mock excitement. "Have you been waiting for me too long?"

"I saw the whole thing." he answered to her hidden question.

"The whole thing of what?" she asked innocently.

"I saw you take Alayna into the service door. Then I see you tease my cousin. Mom went to call your mom."

"My Mom?!" she asked hysterical.

"Yep."

"I thought that I was going home with you for dinner?"

"Nope, not anymore."

"But.."

Meril ignored her and helped me to stand up. "Come on Alayna. Let's go home."

"But, Daddy's watch is broken."

"It's okay. We'll come back to fix it later."

Next thing that I know is I got kicked from behind. I flew forward but Meril caught me.

"If I catch you do something like that again, young lady, then I will call security." I heard Aunt Linda say.

I ran over to her and gave her a big hug. "Thank you, Aunt Linda." Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw the girls leaving.

"What? You're not thankful to me? I mean, I just lost my girlfriend for you." Meril teased.

"Of course, I'm grateful. My hero! What are you going to do when I don't need you anymore?" I teased back.

We all laughed as we climbed into the car and watched as Rebecca's mother dragged her into her car.

# Chapter 3 The Twins

### August 23, 2005

"Hurry up, Meril! We're going to be late!" I hollered through the door.

"It's not like they're not going to be there. Where else are they going to go?" he shot back.

"It's been a while since we've seen them. Aren't you a little excited?"

I didn't wait for his answer. I bounded back out to the car where Aunt Linda was waiting for us. When I bounded into the front seat, she looked exasperated.

"Alayna, how many times do I have to tell you not to slam that door?" she asked.

"Sorry, Aunt Linda, I'm just excited. I feel like it's been ages since I saw them." I said as I was calming down. Aunt Linda always seemed to bring me back down from my excitement.

"It's only been two weeks, Alayna. Bernie and Charlie aren't going anywhere."

"I know." I said soberly.

Just then Meril made it out to the car. He only looked half as excited as I did. I looked back at him and gave him my best smile.

"What took you so long?" I asked.

"Had to get my MP3 player. It wasn't where I thought that I put it."

I rolled my eyes and sat back down so we could go pick them up from the bus station. They were both sitting on a bench with their back packs in their laps. From a distance we couldn't tell them apart. But walking closer to them we could see just the smallest difference in their shirts. Charlie's was wrinkled but Bernie liked to have his clothes ironed. I walked up to Bernie and rolled my eyes.

"You're still having your mom iron your clothes?"

"No, I do it myself now. I think that it makes me look sharper." Bernie replied.

"He thinks that he'll get more girlfriends that way." Charlie teased.

"Shut up, Charlie. You're the one that flirts with all the girls that walk down the hall." Bernie snapped back.

"What's the fun in being so good looking and good at sports if I can't flirt with the girls?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes as Bernie punched his arm and Meril said, "Oh, brother."

"I'm just joking. Let's go." Charlie responded.

Aunt Linda, who had been standing off to the side, waved at us to come on. As we walked to the car, Meril and Charlie had a shoving match that turned into a wrestling match and ended up knocking me into Bernie. He caught me before I could fall on my bottom.

"Hey, cut that out!" I yelled at Meril.

"Oops. Sorry, Alayna." Charlie apologized.

"It's not your fault that you are stronger than Meril." I answered with my teasing grin in place.

Bernie and Charlie laughed at Meril's scowl. The ride home was full of catch up conversations. How was their mom, Charlie's girlfriend, school, teams, and all the necessary information that boys needed to exchange about games and music. I was thoroughly bored and sober by the time we reached the house. I bolted out of the car and heard Aunt Linda's warning shout just as I tripped over my own two feet. To my embarrassment, I ran into Bernie again.

"Oops, sorry, again." I said blushing.

"No problem. Are you okay?" He looked at my face to make sure that the impact that it took on his shoulder didn't bruise it.

"I'm fine, really. Let's go eat. I'm hungry."

Bernie looked for a few more seconds and then said, "Yeah." a little shakily.

By the time that I got into the house, Charlie and Meril were making fun of Bernie about something. But it stopped as soon as they saw me standing in the living room.

"Lunch is ready!" Aunt Linda yelled from the kitchen, before I could ask what was up.

It was a race to the kitchen and I chose to stand back and watch. I had the feeling that the boys were laughing at me about something and I couldn't figure out what it was. I hated the feeling of being the odd person out so I decided to eat my sandwich outside.

The tree in the backyard made the perfect shade for me to eat and think under. Just a few years ago, Meril and I barely even noticed the twins. We would hang out with them but Meril and I were inseparable. We were like twins ourselves. We still are, but lately the twins have become more and more into a tighter circle. But I am the only girl so it should be no surprise to me that the boys don't tell me everything. Most of the time I simply ignore it but something felt off about my entrance.

I didn't have much time to think about it though because my ex-boyfriend, Michael, was approaching me. Since it was only yesterday that I broke up with him, I was surprised to see him. I dusted off my clothes and went to see what he wanted.

"Hey, Michael. What are you doing here?"

"I just came to see how you were doing and to tell you that I was sorry." he answered.

"I broke up with you yesterday because of the lies that you told about me. I don't need or want your sorry."

"Listen, I was only trying to be cool. I only told Tyson and I didn't think that he would spread it around."

"It doesn't really matter. You said that we did some stuff that I would never even think about doing. Stealing clothes from the mall and going to second base with you are just two of them. I haven't even kissed you, yet, let alone go to second base."

By now my voice was loud enough for the boys in the house to hear and Michael was looking flushed and shocked. He was about to respond when the back door explored open and Meril came running out.

"I told you not to come here again, Michael. What do I need to do to convince you that I was serious about it? After what you did to my cousin, what's to stop me from hurting you right now?" Meril asked in a voice that was colder than ice and sent a chill down my back.

Michael took a step back from the menacing look in Meril's eyes.

"Meril.." I started to say but Meril cut me off.

"Don't try to defend him, Alayna. Ninth grade is hard enough without the help of a lying junior jerk that likes to humiliate girls."

"I didn't mean to.." Michael started.

"What did you think was going to happen?" Meril snapped.

"Meril.." I tried again a little louder.

"Bernie, take Alayna away from here." he demanded.

"No! I'm not going anywhere. Stop right there Bernie." I snapped back. Bernie stopped and held his hands up in surrender then I rounded back on Meril. "I already broke up with him, Meril. This is between Michael and me. Stay out of this."

"So, it's okay for the whole school to think that you and him went to second base? You expect me to just let him get away with it? Meril asked me sarcastically.

"Yes, I do, because this is my business. You believed the rumor too, remember? I do. I remember being cornered, by you, at my locker with a crowd around us. You are just as guilty as Michael is with the rumor spreading. But you don't see me throwing a fit at you, do you?"

"But I...we..." Meril started but was unable to finish.

"Are cousins? Yes, we are and best friends, which is why I forgave you. Michael is my _ex-_ boyfriend. I don't need your help on this."

Meril looked shocked that I wouldn't take his help. As he started to turn and I was about to tell Michael to leave, Charlie came out of nowhere and punched Michael in the mouth.

"Charlie!" I shouted stunned.

"What? I wasn't a part of it and you're practically family. Why would I not get to show how I feel about it?"

I ran over to Michael and looked at his bleeding mouth. I was secretly pleased that Charlie had done it but I was trying to prove a point.

"You best leave, Michael. It seems that we are not allowed to talk." I told him as I helped him up.

"Yeah, see you around school." he said and then leaned down to kiss me on my cheek. He straightened up quickly. "Maybe." he added as he hastily left.

I turned around and noticed all the boys trying to stand innocently. I narrowed my eyes at them and stomped off. Before I could get very far, Meril grabbed a hold of my arm.

"Alayna, wait, I'm sorry for everything, really. I'll fix everything at school somehow."

"Whatever, Meril, it doesn't really matter. People will believe what they want to believe." I smiled at him and looked at the boys. "Do you want to play football?" I asked.

There was a chorus of yes's and Meril took off after the ball. Charlie and I were on one team and Meril and Bernie on the other. Nobody scored after two times of trying and we called it the first quarter. While we were taking a break, our fathers came out of the garage.

Daddy is trying to create a time machine as a hobby. All of our fathers are working on it. Apparently, they were science fiction fans growing up and they thought about doing it for a long time. Sometimes, I got to go watch Daddy when we were at our house and no one else was around. But when all the guys were working on it, they didn't let us near it.

Right now they were taking a break and, since the twins hadn't seen their dad in two weeks, they ran over to see him. Meril and I watched them for a few minutes and then decided to say hi to our own fathers.

"Hi, dad!"

"Oh, hi, Alayna! Are you kids having fun today, sweetheart?"

"Yeah. Well, Michael came by. Meril kind of yelled at him and Charlie punched him in the mouth."

"Oh, really!! How do you feel about that?" he asked with a grin on his face.

"Well, it felt kind of good to have someone defend me, other than Meril. Michael deserved it."

"Well, good for Charlie then." Daddy said with a bigger smile. "Looks like the boys are waiting on you, honey. I'll see you at supper. Right now we are going over to our house to work on the time machine." he bent down and kissed my forehead and rushed to where Uncle Allen was waiting.

The boys were waiting impatiently for me and when I got over to them they rolled their eyes.

"Girls!" Charlie said but he apologized right after because Bernie smacked the back of his head.

"This isn't just any girl, this is Alayna." Bernie said with a wink.

I blushed but said, "Let's play ball."

Meril and Bernie scored their first try but Charlie and I couldn't make it. By the time half time came, I was tired and exhausted. Aunt Linda had laid out some oranges for us to snack on and Charlie joked that maybe the stickiness would help me hold on to the ball. Bernie elbowed Charlie and a wrestling match ensued.

Charlie and I were behind by only one score by the time it was fourth quarter. He decided to pass it to me on a hail mary. I ran all the way to our end zone and watched as the ball came flying toward me. I jumped up to catch it and, just as I reached up for it, Bernie jumped up to intercept.

We collided into each other and his elbows accidentally struck my chest; knocking out my breath. Meril was shouting that they won but I couldn't seem to breathe and the world went dark.

I woke up to three anxious boys kneeling over me. Bernie had tears in his eyes and I sat up confused.

"What happened and why is Bernie crying?" I asked.

"Alayna, I'm so sorry! We ran into each other and I think that you fainted." Bernie answered.

"Oh, yeah that sounds like me. Don't cry Bernie. It was an accident."

"I thought that I killed you!" Bernie exploded.

Shocked; I just stared at him. Why was he being so defensive?

"Okay." I said as I slowly stood up.

I allowed Bernie to help me up so it could ease his guilt. What happened next was a shock. As soon as I was standing, he looked at my face carefully and then leaned over to lightly brush his lips against mine. They were as soft as butterfly wings and, for a second, I just stood there shocked.

He stepped back and apologized but then I grabbed him and kissed back but not as gently. It was my first kiss and I wasn't sure what I was doing. He stood shocked for a second and then wrapped his arm around my waist as I wrapped my arms around his neck. We kissed softly and slowly until we heard Meril and Charlie laughing.

I stepped back, blushing furiously, but Bernie didn't remove his arms. Instead he leaned down and kissed my cheek and whispered a 'thank you' into my ear before turning and taking off for his brother. I watched for a second still stunned by my first kiss as Meril came up to me. I could tell that he was going to say something sarcastic by the way that he was standing so I gave him a glare that changed his mind.

"Well, things are going to certainly be different now." he said instead.

"Hmm? Oh, I don't think so." I replied watching and realizing for the first time how gorgeous Bernie was.

"Well, Mom says that, when best friend become boyfriend and girlfriend, it changes things."

"Who said that we are going to be boyfriend and girlfriend? It was just a kiss." I snapped back furiously. The truth was that the idea of things changing because of the kiss frightened me.

"Well, that kiss didn't look like 'just a kiss'." Meril teased.

I punched him in the arm, looked at the twins wrestling on the ground, and went in to talk to Aunt Linda. She told me that it would change things but maybe it wouldn't if I stop it from going farther than the kiss. She didn't look too sure so I knew what I had to do. Before I could talk to Bernie, Daddy came to get me. I told Bernie that I needed to talk to him the next day. I thought about what I needed to say until I finally fell asleep.

Morning came by fast and, when we got to Aunt Linda's house, the boys were getting ready to leave with their dad. After saying goodbye to Charlie, I pulled Bernie off to the side. He didn't look too happy.

"I know what you are going to say." he said. "I don't want things to change either but I can't help how I feel."

"Bernie, you are my best friend and you always will be. Because of that, I love you. But I enjoy your friendship and I don't want any of that to change."

Bernie looked at me for a second. "I love you, too. If that's the way that you really feel then I will leave it the way that it is. Goodbye, Alayna. See you next time." he said expressionlessly. He bent down and lightly brushed his lips against mine and then slowly got into the car beside Charlie.

"Bye." I said softly as I watched the car roll away. I barely noticed the tear that slid down my face. Was I doing the right thing? Or did I just destroy a teenage boy's heart, someone that I care about.

# Chapter 4: Apologies

### June 21, 2006

I woke up in a very bad mood. As I lay there, I tried to remember why. My dream was a very vivid one and it took a minute to remember the night before. Meril came stomping in the movies, where I was on a date, and dragged my boyfriend up by the hair. I can't believe that he actually punched him. I mean, granted I wanted to do the same thing, but I don't think that it was any of his business. I never felt so humiliated by two boys before.

Tyson, my date, was offering to take me to his car and do more than just kissing. I wasn't really as shocked as I should have been. After all, he was one of the ones that started a nasty rumor about me a couple of years ago. I thought that he had changed, but the fact that he had the nerve to ask me to do what he wanted, made me furious.

Before I could say or do anything about it, Meril had come out of nowhere and punched him. I got popcorn and soda all over me. The boys got some on themselves but it didn't stop them from fighting. Then I got grabbed by security and removed from the building. As soon as I was left outside, I turned around and ran into my old nemesis; Rebecca.

The smile on her face made my hands ache to hit something. I was still furious about Meril showing up and yanking my boyfriend up by the hair. I don't know how I got popcorn and soda on me, exactly. As a matter of fact, I think that Meril must have already had it all over him. While I was thinking about it, Rebecca was making a comment about it. When she smirked at me, I just smiled. I didn't really hear what she said anyway.

"Hey, is that your mom coming?" I asked.

Rebecca spun around and looked in the direction that I was pointing at. When I started laughing, she spun back around but was unable to say anything because security was dumping Meril and Tyson down on the curb. The boys were still trying to get a hold of each other. Rebecca stood frozen for a second before she regained her composure.

"Meril? Tyson?" Rebecca questioned. Then she looked at me with a glare that would have frozen normal people in place. They both had been her boyfriend at one point in her life and she blamed me for losing them both.

Meril, who had the on and off relationship with her, froze and turned around looking nervous. Tyson tried to take advantage of the distraction but security caught his arm and said that, if he didn't calm down, he was going to be going home in the back of a police car instead of in his Dodge Magnum.

Rebecca and Meril were having a conversation when Tyson came over to me. He grabbed me around the waist but I stepped out of it.

"Come on, Alayna, don't be like that. It's not my fault that your crazy cousin attacked me."

"I don't know why Meril did that to you but it was what I wanted to do to you." I snapped back.

He looked a little taken back. "Why?"

"Why? I seriously have to answer that question?" I said as I started walking away.

"Wait, wait, wait. Alayna, wait." he reached me before I even made it to the curb. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm an idiot. I just thought that, you know. I love you, you love me, right?"

I looked at him and I was shaking with fury. "I don't know what I feel right now. But what makes you think that I want to, you know?"

"I'm leaving tomorrow, for college and all the training camps. This is the last time that we will be able to even spend with each other."

"So, I'm just supposed to give you a goodbye present?" I asked incredulously. "What kind of girl do you think I am?" I shoved at his chest, broke away from his grasp, and spun on my heel to leave.

"My love, I think that you are my love." he was shouting at me.

"No, I'm not!" I yelled as I rounded on him. "You are eighteen years old and heading to college. I am sixteen still going to high school. We've only been going out a couple of months. You must think that I am stupid as well as easy. Sorry, Tyson, I had hoped that you had changed. Now I see how stupid I was."

I pulled out my cell phone to call a cab. Just as they answered, Tyson walked over and planted a solid kiss on my mouth. I couldn't help what happened next because he was so good at it. I dropped the cell phone, heard it shatter, dismissed it, and wrapped my arms around Tyson's neck. After a few heated seconds, he pulled back and smiled.

"Don't dismiss my feelings for you. I have always liked you. You turned into somebody that I thought that you weren't." he looked at me for a second. "Maybe I'll see you next summer." He gave me a soft kiss and, just at that moment, Meril strode over.

"Get away from my cousin, Tyson."

"No worries, Meril. I was just saying good bye. Good luck with the team next year."

Tyson took off towards his car without looking back. I picked up the broken pieces of my cell phone and turned to leave. Meril grabbed a hold of my arm.

"Have you lost your mind?" he whispered furiously. "You told me that you and Tyson broke up on the last day of school. Your dad said that you were on a date with a sixteen year old, not Tyson. Why did you lie?"

"You know why. You and dad were riding me about him leaving for college. The only way to get you off my back was to tell you that we broke up. I didn't want to hear Daddy's lecture about long distance relationships again."

"I had to find out like that? With his tongue down your throat and whispering things that I don't want to acknowledge?" By the time he was finished, he was flushed and I was furious.

" _You_ had no business coming in there and hitting my boyfriend. How did you know that I was here?"

"It doesn't matter! The point is that he just turned eighteen and he was practically in your _lap_!"

"That is none of your business!" I snapped back. "What I do is not your business. I could handle myself. Or did you really think that I was going to do it?"

He blushed and then regained his composure. "It is too my business. You're family and my best friend. I'm the one that has to pick you back up when you fall."

I didn't hear what he said because I was still stuck on the blush. "You did, didn't you?" I asked very quietly.

"Huh? Did what?" Meril asked confused.

"You thought that I was going to go into his car! You assumed that I was going to..."

"No! No I didn't, Alayna."

"Yes, you did. I saw your face when I asked. And if you thought that I would, no wonder Tyson thought that I would."

"Alayna.."

"In fact, maybe I should have." I said with a slight raise in my voice.

"No, Alayna..." Meril was sounding panicked.

"Yes, maybe I should have. That way, at least, I earned the opinions of others, especially the ones that I considered to be my best friends."

I spun on my heel and left. I was too furious to care where I was going. It wasn't the first time that Meril thought that way about me. But it still hurt. Tyson's last comment to me had confused me. He went one minute trying to seduce me to the next minute saying that I wasn't what he expected and saying good bye. Did he break up with me because I wasn't easy?

That didn't make sense. Was it a test? He didn't seem to be upset when he left. He actually seemed to be happy. Come to think of it, when we were arguing his face was a little off and he seemed a little off when he was suggesting taking the activity to the car.

I was vaguely hearing a sound beside me; a soft engine sound, but I was too busy thinking. I tried to examine all of Tyson's facial features, trying to analyze the way his eyes looked compared to his tone.

"Alayna! Earth to Alayna! Come in space cadet!" I heard someone calling.

I slowly turned to find out what the person wanted and it was Tyson. I started and almost fell on my bottom but Tyson jumped out of the car and caught me.

"Whoa, love, calm down. I didn't mean to scare you." he said as he wrapped his arms around me.

I rested my head against his shoulder. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything!"

"Shh, don't worry about it, baby. Besides the fight was a good distraction." he teased.

"I'm not apologizing for Meril! I'm apologizing for over reacting."

"Who said that you were over reacting?" he asked

He said it so sincerely that I stepped back a little. "What are you saying?"

"Nothing, I'm just glad that we didn't make it to the car. I allowed my hormones to lose control. You're the only one that knows the truth about me and I am glad that it is still intact. I do love you and it was never my intention to take advantage of you."

Now I was really confused. "Were you or were you not serious?" I asked bluntly.

"Well, I was half serious." He turned around so that I couldn't look him in the eyes. "Listen, I am a guy and we make mistakes, you know? I know that you're not that way but I wasn't thinking with my head. I have never done it before and I was nervous. I don't think we would have made it to the car, even if Meril hadn't stopped us. You would have or I would have snapped out of it."

"Why did you assume that I wanted to do it because 'I love you'?" I asked.

When he didn't answer, I walked around to face him in the front. "Well?"

"Um, well, you seemed so upset. I wasn't sure why. I thought that maybe I had been wrong and you did want to finish, so I was giving you an option to do it without feeling cheap."

He turned away again and I was about to respond when he continued. "It's not like I could say no to you. Even now, looking at you, I can imagine the feel of you in my arms, the softness of your kisses, the speed of your breathing, and it drives my hormones crazy." he shuddered a little. "But, I was nervous. I mean, I could go to jail, with you being only sixteen and I am eighteen. But I was glad that you didn't because, if we do, I wanted to do it right."

"You say that you love me, but did you not break up with me because I wasn't easy?"

"No!" he said that so vehemently that I stepped back, even before he turned around. "No, I didn't break up with you and I'm glad that you're not easy. I've always loved you, even when we were just kids. I did some stupid things that hurt you and I regret every one. There are things that I have been told, about you, that made me think that you were easy. That is what I meant when I said that you weren't what I expected, and that is what made me love you more. I leave tomorrow for summer camp at college and I didn't think that I would get to see you again."

He grabbed a hold of my hands and locked gazes with me. I could feel my heart kick up speed as he bent slowly over me. When his lips touched mine, my knees almost gave out. My mind is telling me that I should be mad at him for humiliating me but my body wasn't listening. He broke it off, slowly, and smiled at me.

"As a matter of fact, Alayna, I was coming to your house. I didn't want that to be my good bye. I was going to give you this over Christmas but I can't wait."

I just stared at him for a minute; confused. "Give me what? Your dodge magnum?" I teased.

He just smiled at me and pulled something from his pocket. "No; this!"

I looked at the small object that he was holding. I was thinking that this is not as romantic as I thought it would be, but before I could say anything he continued.

"It's not an engagement ring. It's a promise ring. It is a promise, from me, to be faithful, to you, while I am at college unless you decide to break up with me. It is also a promise to me, from you, that you will be faithful to me. It is sort of a pre-engagement; engagement ring."

I just stared at it for a second. I was too shocked. He looked at me and his smile faltered.

"Don't you like it?" he asked sounding unsure.

His tone snapped me out of my shocked state. "Of course, I like it, Tyson. I'm just shocked."

I threw my arms around him and gave him a solid kiss and nearly knocked him over. He wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug. I could feel his shaking and then I could feel his determination as he shifted a little. I pulled back and took the ring from him and put it on my finger.

"I promise. I promise to be faithful to you, while you are at college. I promise to watch all of your games, even if you don't play and I promise to be here for you at Christmas vacation. You better be here, too!" I said in an excited rush.

"I'll be here, I promise." he replied. "Are you ready to go home? I can take you. Your dad is going to kill me."

"Don't worry about him. I'm too happy to be scared." I kissed him on the cheek. "Let's go!" I said as I reluctantly pulled away.

I always like riding in his car. It was so comfortable and big. We didn't talk on the way home, but we never let go of each other's hands. When we pulled up to the house, I reached over and gave him a short, soft kiss. "Bye, Tyson. Be careful and come home as soon as you can."

"I love you, Alayna. I'll call you when I make it. Good bye, love. Meril's coming, you better leave." He added after looking over my shoulder.

I climbed out of the car, watched him drive away with tears rolling down my face, and then turned around to go talk to my dad. Meril had something else planned.

"What do you think that you are doing? Why were you in the car with him?" he asked with his jaws tense.

I simply looked at him and said, "It is none of your business, Meril. Get out of my way; I need to go talk to Daddy."

Meril laughed. "Oh, your daddy's been waiting to talk to you, too." he said smugly.

I didn't like his tone but I sucked it up and went in for my punishment. I would take it with pride.

# Chapter 5: Some Promises Are Made to be Broken

### December 25, 2006

I sat on my bed, in my black dress, spinning my ring around my finger. It was Christmas but it didn't feel like it to me. Four days ago, I was eagerly waiting for my boyfriend to show up. When he never showed up, I started pacing. He called before he left and told me that he had a surprise for me. He wouldn't tell me over the phone and said that he had to show me. I wasn't sure if it was going to be him breaking up with me, after breaking his promise, or not. It didn't help that he didn't show up when he said that he would.

Charlie, Bernie, and Meril tried to distract me but I was too nervous. He never showed up and I went to bed crying. Meril said that his parents hadn't heard from him since he called to tell them that he was halfway home. He stopped answering calls after that.

The next morning, I woke up to a light tap on my bedroom door. I thought that it might have been Tyson, so I jumped up real quick and answered the door. But it wasn't him, it was only my dad and a wave of disappointment hit me in the gut. My dad looked at me with pity and I couldn't help asking,

"What is it, Daddy?" He didn't answer, so I tried another question. "Is Tyson here, yet?"

He shook his head and tears filled his eyes. "No, sweetheart, Tyson isn't here yet."

"Did he break up with me, then? Is that why he isn't here and his parents won't answer the phone?" Daddy went to answer but I had interrupted. "If this is the way that he is going to break up with me, then I feel like an idiot for wearing this ring."

I started taking the ring off but Daddy stopped me. "Alayna, he didn't break up with you, honey. He can't make it. There's been an accident..." Daddy paused because I had nearly fainted and he had to catch me.

"Accident?" I asked. "Tyson or his parents?" I was barely able to ask because I was afraid of the answer.

"Tyson."

"Oh, God! How bad is it?" I asked panicked.

"Very bad, Alayna. He didn't make it."

It was a good thing that Daddy had a hold of me because I could no longer stand up. The world started to spin and all I could see were images of Tyson. The first time that we met when we were kids, the look on his face when I yelled at him for starting rumors, the way he used to look at me before we dated, the way that he was nervous when he finally asked me out, and the last time that I saw him. When I opened my eyes, I realized that I was lying on my bed with my Dad hovering above me.

"What happened?" I asked him.

"You passed out in my arms." he explained carefully.

"Huh?Why? Is Tyson not here, yet?" I asked.

My father glanced behind him and looked back at me worriedly. "Umm, honey, I'm sorry. I think that maybe you need to rest a little longer." he said.

"No, I slept too long; I need to get back up. I must've over worked on the decorations." I started to get up but Daddy stopped me. "I'm sorry that I scared you, but I need to get ready. He's going to be here any minute."

"No, he's not, sweetheart."

"What? Why?" I asked. "Is he too busy?"

"No, honey, he's been.."

"No! Don't say it, please. Please tell me that it was just a nightmare. Please, Daddy, please tell me that I just had a nightmare."

I kept pleading but he just held me. I don't know why but it just made me angry. I didn't believe him and I shoved him away. "No! No! I won't believe you! I won't believe you because he promised me. He wouldn't break his promise! He promised that he would come back for Christmas!"

"Alayna, calm down, honey." Daddy said as he wrapped his arms around me. "Please, calm down." I could feel his tears hit my hair but all I could do is mumble my denial. "He was in a very bad accident, honey. He didn't break his promise." He tried to comfort me but it wasn't working.

"So, it's my fault, then. Just like Grammy and Pappy. He was coming..."

"No, Alayna. It's not your fault. Please calm down."

He held me tighter and dropped a quick kiss on my head just before he started humming my mom's lullaby. It always calmed me down. His third time through, I started to shake and my breathing slowed but tears slid down my face in torrents. My mind slipped into an ongoing movie of memories. I remembered the flashes, and more memories of Tyson, even some of the ones where I secretly watched him. The last time that we talked, he told me that he liked me for most of our lives. I never told him that I felt the same way for most of my life. I had some years where I hated him but, most of the time, I crushed on him.

I'm not sure how long Daddy held me, while I cried, before my tears dried up. When they did, I just laid in Daddy's arms until I fell asleep. I had a dreamless sleep and I didn't wake up until the following morning. When I opened my eyes, Daddy was lying in a chair beside my bed. I quietly crawled out of bed. My body was very weak, so I used a wall to keep myself up. I was almost out the door when Daddy woke up.

"Alayna? Where are you going?"

"I'm starving. I was going to the kitchen. I didn't mean to wake you, Daddy."

He was moving towards me and reached me just as my legs gave out. "No, you need to lie down or sit. I will go get you something to eat. You haven't eaten in twenty four hours."

He laid me on my bed and rushed off to get me something to eat. I stared at the ceiling, thinking about nothing. I didn't really want to think. I could feel the sharp pain pressing down on my chest. Daddy came back with a couple of scrambled eggs with cheese and a piece of toast on a plate and a glass of orange juice. The food looked really good and I nearly made myself dizzy jumping up to grab it.

"Whoa, calm down, sweetheart." Daddy said. He handed me the plate, then helped me lift up so I could eat.

"Thank you, Daddy." I took a bite of food and finished it quicker than I thought possible. "Mmm. That was really good. Did you make this?"

"No, Aunt Linda is here. She's helping me clean the house and taking care of you. When you collapsed, I nearly had my own nervous breakdown because I couldn't get you up. So, that's when I called her. Meril is downstairs, too."

I looked at my dad and wondered if I had come close to dying or was he just over reacting. "Meril? He doesn't clean houses, remember? He's a football player that thinks that it will ruin his arm." I reminded him.

Daddy chuckled. "No, you're right. He's not here to clean. I didn't ask him to come here. He came for you."

I guess I had a sour look on my face because Daddy scowled and said, "You better be nice. He feels awful and he loves you. He's your cousin and he is convinced that you won't see him."

"I won't!"

"Alayna! I taught you better than that. I know that you remember how you felt when he treated you this way."

"The difference is that I didn't treat him like a jerk before they died. Or tell him that he couldn't talk or write to them. I didn't have people at school talking about him."

With every word my voice was rising and my father was getting redder. "Alayna, that's enough! You are being unfair and you know it."

"Am I?" I asked angrily.

"Yes, you are young lady. You know that Meril and I both only wanted to protect you. He's never once tried to stop you from writing to Tyson. I am sure that he is not the one telling people to talk about you. As a matter of fact, I am sure of that because he nearly got suspended twice defending you."

I heard enough excuses and I was in too much pain to care anymore. I rolled my eyes and lay back down.

"Thanks for the food, Daddy. May I go back to bed now?"

"Sure. You think about what I said. It is not Meril's fault that Tyson had the accident."

I heard him leave and I lay there with my eyes closed. He was right, it was my fault. He was trying to keep his promise to me and that is why he was driving here. He was probably too tired and fell asleep at the wheel. His parents are going to hate me! I closed my eyes and cried until I fell asleep thinking about him. When I woke back up, Meril was sitting beside my bed looking a little reluctant.

"Hey, Cousin, how are you feeling?" he asked.

"Why do you care?"

He recoiled like I had slapped him. "I do care about you. Please don't act that way." When I didn't respond, he muttered to himself. "I knew this was a bad idea. Uncle Dennis was wrong."

"Wrong about what?"

He gave me a side long glance and chewed on his bottom lip. "Well, he thought that you wanted me up here. I told him that I thought he was wrong but he insisted. Now here I am; looking at you stare at me with hateful eyes."

He sighed and leaned his head against the wall. I didn't really want to look at him but Daddy was right; I need to stop blaming him for it all. It was my fault anyway. I sighed and braced myself for the day.

"It's not your fault." I said.

Meril jumped slightly. "What?"

"I said that it isn't your fault. It's mine and I need to stop blaming you. I am sorry. He was coming here for me so it is really my fault."

"Is that what you think? That it is your fault, Alayna? Not everything is your fault. You're not perfect and you have to stop feeling responsible for everything."

I rolled over to face away from him. He was probably right about that too. "Can you please leave so I can get dressed?"

"Sure, no problem, Lanie."

I waited until I heard the door shut and went to get dressed. The problem was that I didn't feel like getting dressed; I didn't feel like doing anything. But I know that I had to. I pulled on a pair of sweats and one of Tyson's football jerseys and left to face the day. When I got downstairs, Tyson's family was in the living room. Tyson's mom, Belinda, rushed over to give me a hug.

"We are having his funeral in two days. Even though you weren't married yet, I would still love for you to sit by me. You will always be considered as my daughter. Will you do that for me?" she asked.

"Yes, ma'am." I said hugging her back.

"Well, I just wanted to let you know. I must be going now." She gave me a quick kiss and left with her husband.

I stood there; stunned. I felt honored but, at the same time, like a piece of me was missing and never going to be whole again. I looked up at Aunt Linda.

"I need a dress."

"Absolutely. Let's go get you one, honey." she replied.

We spent thirty minutes looking for the perfect dress. For those thirty minutes, I imagined that I was dressing up for Tyson and I actually forgot that it was for his funeral. After that, for the next few days, I couldn't bring myself to do anything but eat, sleep, and cry.

Now here I am, in my room, dressed and waiting. I still don't know what he planned to tell me. I guess that I will never know what he planned to tell me. I can hear everyone downstairs getting ready. Not sure what time it is, I decide that I need to get up and go downstairs. Everyone stopped moving and looked at me like I was a zombie coming back to life.

"Is it time to go now?" I asked.

"Yes, I was just getting my keys." Daddy said.

Meril walked over to me and offered me his arm. "May I?" he asked.

I linked my arm to his and nodded. I will need the support. I can already feel my legs shaking. I leaned on him for more support and I saw him grin. It made me feel a little better to see that I had made him smile, especially since I haven't been nice to him since the fight at the theatre.

"Meril, I'm sorry! I know that it wasn't your fault. I just needed someone to blame, I guess. That's no excuse and I am really glad to have you here."

"Don't worry about it, Lanie. I know how much you loved him. I'm just glad to see you up moving around. I thought that you would hide yourself in your room and that your dad and I would have to come get you. I should have known that I was wrong. You have always been the stronger of the two of us."

I managed a weak smile. "Did I just hear you say that a 'girl' is stronger than you?"

"Yes. If you repeat that to anyone then I will deny it."

I rolled my eyes and crawled into the car. "I am glad that you are my best friend."

He ducked his head into the car to make sure that I was buckled up then he made his way to his side. "More like; I am your only friend." he teased as he climbed in.

My uncle was at work so he was unable to make it but he bought me some flowers to lie beside Tyson. When we got there, the chapel was packed. Belinda came and ushered me away from my family. She took me over to the side to tell me something.

"Alayna, I know this is going to be hard for you but I need to talk to you."

I don't say anything so she continued. "They found this in Tyson's car and I believe that he was going to give it to you." she said as she pulled something out of her pocket. It was a black box and my heart started pounding while tears started streaming. I went to grab it but she held up a hand. "Wait a minute. The reason that I am sure this is yours is because, a month ago, I helped him put down a down payment on a house for the two of you. He was going to ask permission for him to marry you this summer. But you were not going to know about the house until after you turned 18."

"What?" I was very confused.

"He wanted to marry you because he loved you. He purchased a house close to the college so, when you graduate, you will have a place to live with him. I guess he assumed that you would agree and join him at his college."

"I would have, if I could get into college." I said dazed.

She smiled. "I know you would, honey. We need to go. Here is your ring." She handed it to me and planted a kiss on my cheek.

The ring was gorgeous. It was a thin gold band with a princess diamond in the middle. I took it out and replaced my promise ring with it. When it was my turn to pay my respects, Meril came with me to keep me steady. Tyson looked peaceful and he was smiling. I told him that I loved him and put my promise ring in the coffin with him. The rest of the service went by in a dreamlike state. The ride to the cemetery, I spent thinking about what might have been and after the service I pulled Belinda aside.

"Thank you! What's going to happen to the house?"

"I'm going to keep it and, if you ever decide that you want it, you can have it. You will always be considered my daughter, even though it was not ever made official."

I hugged her and sobbed. "Thank you! I love you, too. Take care of yourself."

"I will, honey." She looked into my eyes. "You take care of yourself too. Promise?"

"Yes, ma'am."

She kissed my cheek and walked off. Meril came to my side. "Are you ready to go, Lanie?" he asked.

"Yes. I need to go home and start planning for my future. I want to make Tyson proud. Look at my gift."

"Wow, that's pretty! So he was going to ask you to marry him? You would have said 'yes'." He smiled and I nodded. "Yeah, I know. Hey, Lanie?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"Letting me help you. It helped me, too. I love you, cousin, and I'm sorry about Tyson. He was a semi friend of mine but only because of you and he was a great guy."

I didn't respond and we walked silently to the car. When Meril got in, I scooted over and laid my head on his shoulder. It was a comfort to know that I was not the only one of us that would miss him. When we reached the house, Daddy got out and walked me back into the house. Before I went upstairs, I gave him a hug and told him that I loved him. I lay down in bed and smiled as I thought about Tyson's smile. With the ring, I will always have a part of him with me. My favorite Christmas present ever came on the worst day of my life.

# Chapter 6: Goodbyes

### June 21, 2009

"Going to college in a few short months. I'm going to be away for a while, so I'm sorry that I won't be able to talk to you every day anymore. I've already said good bye to Grammy and Pappy. So, technically, you are the third one for me to say good bye to. I'm going to tell my mom next. I decided that I didn't want to go to state. Your mom isn't feeling too well, so I told her to sell the house to help her with the bills. Wait, it looks like I wasn't the only one to see you today. You have a flower in your bucket."

I reached over and grabbed the flower out of the bucket. It was a plastic rose with a note strapped on it. I pulled the paper out of the rubber band. I was expecting it to be from his mom or dad but it wasn't. I definitely did not expect it to be what it was. It read:

\--------------------------------------------------

Tyson, I will always love you.

Alayna 2040

P.S. She doesn't know that I am writing this

but she comes here every year now that she

remembers you. Oh, Alayna, I love you. Derek 2040

\--------------------------------------------------------

"Oh my gosh, Tyson. Do you know what this means? I have to go, Tyson. I love you and I'll see you next year."

I left the rose but grabbed the note and took off to my house. I was hoping that he was home. I was exhausted by the time that I got there and nearly ran into Bernie.

"Whoa, Lanie, what's the rush? Why is it that you are always running into me?" he teased.

"Where's the fire?" Charlie teased.

I was in too much of a hurry. "Is Daddy here?"

"Yes. He picked us up." Charlie said.

"Are you not..." Bernie started.

I flew past before he could finish. "Daddy! Daddy! Where are you?"

"Out here, sweetheart."

I ran to him "Look! Look what I found!" I yelled excitedly as I thrust the paper towards him.

He read it, his eyebrows rose, and a smile spread slowly across his face. "Where did you find this?"

"We'll, it is obvious, Daddy. It was wrapped around a rose at Tyson's grave."

"Is today the twenty first?"

"Yes."

"Hmm. I wonder who Derek is. Oh well, we know that this is going to work. I have to call Allen and tell him. Oh! I picked up the boys. They are waiting for you."

"I know." I said but he didn't hear me because he was already thinking hard. I went off to find the boys. "Bernie, guess what!" I yelled to him.

"What?" he asked.

"Come on, Lanie, you know that Bernie doesn't have any brains!" Charlie teased.

I heard him grunt and then lots of noises coming from the living room. I made it into the room to see the boys wrestling around on the ground.

"Come on boys. Stop destroying my house!" I said exasperated.

"Yes, ma'am!" They both snapped.

"What do you want me to guess?" Bernie asked as he straightened up.

I held the paper out to him. I watched a range of emotions cross his face. First there was shock then came disbelief, jealousy, and then anger. I was confused at the last two emotions but, before I could ask what was wrong, he handed it over to Charlie. Charlie was as excited as I was and nearly bounced on his feet.

"Derek. Who's Derek, Alayna?" Charlie asked.

I watched Bernie walk off and thought about that one kiss; years ago. "How should I know? That is twelve years from now. It says that I come here every year, but this is the first time that I saw anything there."

"Maybe someone removed them the last couple of years." Charlie suggested. "But who cares! This means that our dads are not wasting their time! They actually build a time machine! Maybe it is finished in 2040."

"You're right! Maybe it will be. We need to tell Meril!" I started to run out the door, and then I remembered something. "Hey, how come Daddy had to pick you two up?"

"Mom needed the car." Bernie answered as he came in looking gloomy.

I grabbed his hand and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. He smiled and walked me out to my car.

"Do either of you know where Meril is?" I asked.

"Check the gym. He has that fancy football scholarship to uphold." Charlie suggested.

"What? Are you not satisfied with your brainiac scholarship?" I asked. "Doctors, huh? Both of you? They say that twins share everything but I think that the two of you over do it." I teased.

"Not girls!" Bernie corrected.

Charlie and I both chuckled, which caused Bernie to blush. We jammed out to the radio until we got to the gym. The boys jumped out of the car before I could even turn off my engine. They had Meril out of the gym before I could even get halfway to the door. Bernie was carrying his gym bag while Charlie was dragging Meril out.

"Hey, Lanie, how's the treadmill coming?" Meril asked.

Since the movie theatre incident a few years ago, Meril and my relationship has been strained. I hardly talked to him for a year and after Tyson's death it got worse. That and the fact that he was working on his scholarship caused me to get closer to Daddy. During that time, I gave Daddy the idea to design his time machine as a treadmill. For the last year, our relationship has almost gotten back to normal but Daddy still won't let him help with the project.

"It is coming along great! Guess what?" I looked over towards Charlie. "Don't you dare tell him."

Charlie stuck his lip out in a pout and I glared at him.

"What? Bernie asked you out?" Meril teased. Bernie shoved him with a punch to the shoulder. "No, I suppose not." Meril replied. "Tell me Alayna. I'm too tired to guess."

"You're no fun sometimes, Meril." Charlie complained.

I handed him the note and watched the same shock on his face that Daddy had. "Is this for real?" he asked.

"Yep. Do you think that it is the treadmill?"

"Probably. That's awesome! 2040, huh? Do you suppose that is the year that it is completed?"

"I guess so. Maybe that's why I wrote it; to let us know."

Meril wrapped me up in a hug and twirled me around. "You're a genius, Lanie! I have so many places that I want to visit." He looked at the twins. "We can be famous explorers."

The boys carried on with their exploring dreams while we walked towards the car. I felt like an outsider and kept my mouth shut. Bernie sat in the front beside me and the other two sat in the back.

"So, what are you going to do when it gets fixed, Lanie?" Bernie asked.

"I'm going to go back to the past and get a better understanding of history."

"Really? Sounds cool. Maybe you can come with us."

"No, that's okay, Bernie. You guys will be going for different reasons. I would only slow you down."

He nodded and looked out at the window. "Boston University, right?" he asked.

"What? Oh! Oh, yeah. I couldn't bring myself to join you guys in Oklahoma. But I am proud of you guys. All of you."

"Yeah, I wish Meril was coming with us. Apparently Oklahoma University has all their players."

"Well, at least it will make watching the games interesting. I have three teams to root for."

"Which team are you going to root for, when we play against each other, Lanie?" Meril asked.

"You really have to ask? Geez I thought that you knew better than that."

This got the conversation rolling about colleges. Meril is going to be going to Oklahoma State, the twins are going to Oklahoma University, and I will be going to Boston University. I couldn't go to state and I don't want to live so far away from my Daddy. This is the last time that we will see the boys before we all head off to college.

When we got to the house, Uncle Allen and Richard were in the garage with Daddy. The boys jumped out and ran to their father and wrapped him up in a three way hug. Daddy and Uncle Allen stopped working and strolled over to me.

"Hey, kiddo! I hear that you found an interesting note. Can I see it?" Uncle Allen asked.

"Sure, you guys can have it."

While Daddy and Uncle Allen discussed the note, I went to check out the treadmill. Daddy had all his notes spread out all over the floor. I picked them up and read them. There was a lot of scratched off sentences and some corrections and I lost interest in reading it. To my surprise, I heard Daddy tell Meril that he could help with the machine tonight. When the boys protested, their father invited them too.

"Wow, you are actually going to let us help you?" Charlie asked.

"Why not? I won't get to see you for a long time and I want to spend some time with my sons. I did have plans to go to an amusement park or something like that. But this might be entertaining. What do you think?"

"Yeah, definitely." Bernie said.

We all worked on the project for a couple of hours before we started getting in the way. Instead of kicking us out, Daddy stopped working on the treadmill.

"Are you kids ready for college?" Daddy asked.

"Yes, sir." all three boys responded.

"You boys are lucky that you got a year off from school. You must've been impressive."

"Well, Bernie and I did and internship last summer at a nursing home. It was our excuse to wait for Meril."

"Hey, not all of us are as smart as you Charlie!" Meril snapped.

This brought chuckles from all of our fathers. We spent the rest of the evening playing games. I lost to Bernie on Uno, Meril beat us all on Monopoly, and Charlie won Risk. I think that our fathers were purposely losing but it was one of the best nights of my life. We finished out the night watching the Resident Evil's. The boys were always trying to make me jump but I had watched the movies too many times already.

I was dreaming about Alice being trapped in the hospital when I felt the shaking. It started out slow and then became violent. I jerked awake and accidentally struck someone with my fist.

"Ow! You didn't have to punch me!" Charlie complained.

"What's going on?" I asked. I was tired and irritated. "Why are all of you in my room?"

"We want to go to the beach. Wanna come?" Bernie asked.

"No! I want to sleep!" I cried lying back down.

"Aw, come on, Lanie! Please!" I looked up and saw his puppy dog eyes. "Please, we won't be able to go for a long time. Please. please, please?"

"Oh, alright!" I cried. "Go away so I can get dressed. What time do you have to leave to go home?"

"Not until after dinner." Meril answered.

The boys filed out of my room and I jumped up to pull on my bathing suit. It was a black two piece with a skull on crossbones on the top. I threw on my shorts and a shirt and ran out the door. The boys were outside tossing a beach ball back and forth while they waited for me.

"Hey, what are we going to eat?" I asked.

"We'll worry about that later." Meril said.

"Hold on, I'll be right back."

I ran into the house and grabbed myself a granola bar. The boys left their bowls of milk on the counter. No wonder they weren't hungry. Halfway to the beach, my car broke down.

"Oh, come on! Lanie you are two months late on the oil change." Charlie complained.

"Sorry!" It was all I could think of to say. Meril and Bernie walked to get help.

"Well, now we are spending the day in the sun, _away_ from the water."

Charlie stripped off his shirt and I lay on my towel. "We can get a tan. Get over here and lay out with me." I said.

"I don't think that a good idea."

"Get over here and get your head out of the gutter. Besides Bernie and I made an agreement a long time ago. You boys are more like my brothers."

He muttered something under his breath that I couldn't quite catch before he responded. "Speak for yourself. You may have agreed but I don't think that he has."

He sat down beside me. "I can't help that. I don't really know what to do. I do love him, just not the way that he wants me to."

"If you do anything now then he will know that I told you."

"Well, I don't know what to do. Maybe he will find someone in Oklahoma."

"Maybe."

We sat in silence for such a long time that I almost fell asleep. The sound of tires approaching kept me from falling asleep. Charlie was asleep and I had to nudge him to wake him up. Meril strolled up and smirked.

"Having fun?" he asked.

"Oh yeah, because sweating to death with no water is so much fun." I answered.

The mechanic was looking at the engine; making strange noises while he was looking. Bernie was asking him questions. After a few minutes, Bernie came towards us and shook his head.

"It's busted. He has to take it to the shop. You broke it pretty good, Lanie. Looks like going to the beach is out."

"Does he have a cell phone, Bernie?" Charlie asked. "Because I don't want to sit here forever."

"Yeah, call Dad because Dennis and Allen are not going to be home for a while."

Meril and Charlie walked off. They both seemed very upset with me. Bernie stood, in front of me; looking a little nervous. "Can I talk to you?" he asked.

"Sure." I said, even though I didn't feel right about it. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to be sure that I get to say good bye without the boys making fun of me. I know that you don't feel the same about me as I feel about you. I can live with that as long as you are still my friend."

"I know. I'm going to miss you, too, Bernie."

I grabbed him and gave him a big hug. He squeezed back; holding tight like he would drown if he did not.

"I don't know when I will be able to make it back to see you. So I just want to say that I will always love you. I will always be here for you; no matter what happens."

"I love you too, Bernie. You will always be a brother that I never had. Hopefully, you find yourself a cutie in Oklahoma and invite me to your wedding."

"Yeah." He said with tears in his eyes. "Maybe; and you better show up." He leaned over and kissed my cheek.

I noticed, a few feet up, the boys trying to look busy. I suspected that they were just giving us some space. Bernie grabbed my hand and tagged me along to his brothers' side.

"While we are saying good byes, I want to let you know that I will miss you." I said. "I'll still see you, Meril, but Charlie I don't know when I will get to see you. You better behave and take care of your brother."

"Are you guys an item now?" Meril teased.

"Shut up, Meril." Bernie snapped.

Charlie and Meril both chuckled. "Of course I will, Alayna." Charlie said. "I'll miss you too, Lanie. I love you!"

"Oh, good! I love you too, Charlie!" I felt Bernie's hand tense as I said it. I glanced at him and pulled my hand out so I could give Charlie a hug.

Charlie returned my hug. "You take care of yourself too, Lanie. I really am going to miss you. I want you to know that Bernie is not the only one that loves you in more ways than one. I have always felt the same but, after your reaction to Bernie, I never said anything. I am extremely jealous of Bernie because at least he got to kiss you." he whispered in my ear.

Right at that moment, Richard showed up. He honked his horn and we all rushed to get in. I was a bit shaken by Charlie's confession but sat in between the two boys anyway. I grabbed both of their hands and held onto them until we got home. That was the last time that we got to talk before the boys left. Richard took them for the rest of the day and we only got to say good bye one more time as they pulled out of the drive way. Meril blamed me and was mad at me for the next few days.

# Chapter 7 Treadmill

### June 21, 2013

Today is the day that Daddy is supposed to be finished with his machine. He said that it was for the anniversary of Tyson's death. I still haven't found anyone that I love near as much as him. I thought, for a while, that my boyfriend Teddy came close but he ended up being a jerk. For the last few years, my closest friends have been at different colleges. Right before he left, Charlie told me that he loved me but never told me because of what happened between Bernie and me.

I felt guilty for a while because I didn't feel the same way. But now I can't wait for them to come home. I sent a letter to Meril letting him know that the time machine was up. But I want to go back in time today. Uncle Allen is here helping Daddy finish it up. I sat and thought about where I would go while I was supposed to be cleaning up the house. I decided that I would go tell Tyson about my trip.

I spent a lot of time talking to Tyson and my mom at the cemetery. Talking to my mom always made me feel better but Tyson was going to be my husband. I still wear the ring that he gave me on a necklace. I don't think that I will wear it when I go on the time machine.

I peeked in on Daddy and Uncle Allen but they were too busy to notice. I left a note on the counter; telling Daddy where I was going. I don't want to miss out on the opportunity. They seemed to be working on some sort of remotes. Daddy hasn't really told me what they were for.

The cemetery was very quiet and it was a nice day. I stopped by the flower shop and grabbed a flower to put in his bucket. When I got there, a note was in his bucket. I picked it up expecting it to be the same as every other year; some guy named Derek declaring that he loved me without me knowing that was he sending his messages. But that isn't what it said. I opened up and read it.

Alayna,

It's me, or should I say, you. Today the time machine will work. You have to get on it, no matter what anyone says. You find someone that you love more than Tyson. If you do not get on it, like you plan on, you will not get to meet him. There is going to be some really bad things that are going to happen to you. They make you want to try and stop yourself from going. You even try to warn your dad. Don't listen to him. It is important. Have fun and good luck. Oh yeah, leave your ring at home.

Alayna 2045

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I sat down; unable to stand up any longer, and stared at the letter. This time Derek didn't say anything.

"Good afternoon, Tyson. It looks like I am going to be going for a trip today. I'm pretty excited. Daddy finally fixed the time machine. He is making some sort of remote controls to go with it. I wish that you were here with me. My future self says that I find someone that I love more than you. I doubt it, but I'm going to go anyway. Meril isn't here either. He is taking some sort of tests. I don't know why he isn't just coming home. I can't wait to tell him all about my trip."

I sat back for a few minutes and listened to the soft wind. The feel of the wind felt like a gentle caress and I embraced it. I was a little nervous about what would happen to make me try to stop myself and why I would need to tell myself not to listen to anyone. But the excitement was too great and I wasn't worried for long.

"Well, goodbye Tyson. I'll see you next year, I guess. It seems like I am going to be busy. I'll always love you, Tyson."

I spent a few more hours saying good bye to my mom and grandparents. Then I went home and got ready for my trip. I heard Daddy and Uncle Allen chatting excitedly. I crept up to see if I could catch what they were excited about.

"See, look Allen. All you do is push this button and it will bring you right back here. No matter where you are. What do you think?"

"That's pretty cool. They're small enough to put in your pocket too. So, who is going on it first and what do you plan on doing?"

"Well I am going to send something to the future and then wait for its return. I need to be sure that it works."

I stepped into the room. "Hey, Daddy, what are you doing now?"

"I'm about to test the machine to see if it works."

"Can I be here?"

"Yes, of course." He planted a kiss on my forehead and I left to get dressed.

I put my favorite outfit on and put my hair up in a ribbon. If I am to meet my future soul mate then I need to look pretty. I went into the kitchen and made us all lunch and I heard Daddy scream out. I jumped up; afraid to find him seriously hurt, and ran to the room. When I got in there, he was shaking his hands but not bleeding.

"What happened?"

"I was trying to move the treadmill and I strained my wrist."

"Sprained? Do I need to take you to the hospital?"

Uncle Allen started laughing and I glared at him. "He said 'strained', Alayna." He started laughing again. "The look on your face, honey. You looked like he just lost his arm. Your dad is fine."

I eyed my dad for a minute and saw his smile. "How is the treadmill coming?" I asked.

"It's finished. We even finished these!" he showed me the little remotes.

"What are they?"

"Portables." Uncle Allen answered. "When you shift in time, you take these with you. Then when you are ready to come back, you just push this button and it will bring you back."

"To here?"

"Well, to your original starting place. Which would be to here because there isn't any other treadmills, that I know of anyway." Daddy answered.

"Wow! They are little. Can I see it?"

"Sure. Uncle Allen and I are going to finish this manual."

He handed the remote to me and I studied the remote. It was tiny, black, and had only one button on it. I could easily put it in my pocket. I smelled the food burning and jumped up to grab it off the stove. I was too late to save it, so I just made sandwiches. When I returned to the room, Uncle Allen and Daddy were arguing.

"You have to tell her." Uncle Allen was saying.

"No, I can't. If I do, it will mess everything up. Now, give me that piece of paper back. She needs to know that she will be okay. She needs to know that none of it is her fault. Go keep her company."

"You don't know what you are doing."

"Yes, I do. Now when I finish this give it to Richard. Tell him that he will know when the time comes. Oh and tell him not to forget to pass it on to his kids. Now get out of here before she comes back."

I stepped into the room with the sandwiches. "What's wrong Daddy? You seem upset. I made some sandwiches for us."

"Oh nothing is wrong, honey." He put several pieces of paper down behind him.

"I thought that I heard you two fighting."

I knew that he was lying, I just couldn't figure out why. "Daddy what are you not telling me?"

"Well he isn't telling you that something happens. Something bad happens when you leave. We got several letters and your dad seems to think that you should still go."

"I am."

"Alayna, be reasonable!" Uncle Allen snapped. "Did you not just hear what I said?"

"Yes. I'm still going. Finish your letter, Daddy. I'm going to finish eating. I have some history to learn."

"You're going to let her do this??"

"I don't see why not." He went back to writing his letter and Uncle Allen went back to the manual while muttering that it was a big mistake.

I left the room with my heart pounding. Uncle Allen was probably right but that letter from myself kept rolling in my head. The closer it got to me being ready, the harder it felt to breathe. I heard Daddy say, "Oh, no!" and Uncle Allen say, "I told you so!" come from the room. I tuned them out and concentrated on where I was going to go in the past. I decided on England during the 1700's. That would be interesting to see. I plan on staying out of sight and using the woods to gather information. I was mentally ready and just waiting on Daddy to tell me that he was ready. Daddy came in a few minutes later and I saw that look on his face. Uh oh!

"Hey, Daddy! Are you ready?"

"Well, Alayna, I have decided that you shouldn't go."

"What?"

"I just received a note from Meril. It said, 'Don't let Alayna leave. Danger!"

"I'm still going, Daddy. You can still go with me or not. But I am going."

"No, Alayna. I'm not going and neither or you."

"Yes, I am!" I snapped as I got up. I looked at his face and thought about the note. "I'll be fine, Daddy! Trust me! Think about all that I can bring back. All the information that history classes teach us that is wrong."

"There is danger, Alayna." Uncle Allen cut in.

"You keep saying that but it is my choice. I will be fine."

"What if the danger is not to you but to your dad?" he asked.

I paused and thought about that for a minute. I looked over at Daddy. "He's right. To leave is my choice and my decision to take the chance. You can stay here Daddy." I went over to give him a kiss. "I love you, Daddy!"

"Alayna, please don't go! I'm scared for you. At least wait until you have someone to go with you!" he begged.

I started to walk towards the room with the treadmill and as I passed by Daddy; I paused. "I love you, Daddy, but you raised me to do what I feel is right. We have a chance to tell events that happened centuries ago. Things that weren't recorded can be recorded. I don't want to drag someone else with me. I won't be gone for long. I promise."

"Please, you don't understand the dangers. You don't have anyone going with you. Anything can happen and I wouldn't even know." he begged.

"I can take care of myself. I will be careful and try to stay hidden."

I continued my way to the treadmill; feeling a little guilty because one of the reasons that I fought so hard against Daddy was because of what I wrote to myself in 2045. I punched in the buttons. I heard Daddy scream out "Wait!" just as the blackness crept in. I was scared and felt like I had just killed myself until I opened my eyes to green everywhere.

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I hope that you guys enjoyed this book. Try my other book Discovery . If you enjoyed either one let me know on twitter or email me.

http://twitter.com/mohawkguy28

mohawkguy28@yahoo.com

Note about the author.

I am a mother of five children and have been married to my wonderful husband for 15 years. I have written only a few stories for my kids. We have a dog and two conures. We are originally from Oklahoma and have recently moved to NW Arkansas.

This book is dedicated to Terry, my children, and to my friends, and my mother.
