Good morning, Hank. It's Monday.
Labor Day, 2010!
I got attacked by a baby.
So Hank, I'm totally in love with your video from Friday
where you explored the relationship between privatized risk and public regulation.
And Hank, there was something about your intelligence and your passion that made me think:
"I need to start talking about the issues that are near and dear to my heart, even when they're controversial."
So I'm gonna do it, Hank. I'm just gonna say it. I HATE PENNIES!!!!
So Hank, in the United States of America, we have money,
which we use to facilitate the exchange of goods and services.
The smallest unit of American money is the penny,
which is worth one one-hundredth of a dollar.
So Hank, here's the deal:
Because of inflation, in 1972 a penny was worth what a nickel is worth today, and yet in 1972
our economy managed to function JUST FINE without having a coin that was worth one-fifth of a penny.
Here's what bothers me, Hank:
It costs the United States Mint 1.7 cents to make a penny,
which means that every year, 70 million dollars
of federal tax money goes to subsidizing the existence of the penny.
Now, Hank, we could solve that problem by using steel instead of zinc to make pennies.
But that wouldn't address the underlying problem, which is that PENNIES ARE WORTHLESS.
No, they aren't.
They aren't?
No, because things that are worthless are worth nothing,
and pennies are worth much less than nothing.
So there's this very important idea in economics called opportunity cost that I'm
not going to explain, but basically anytime you are doing something
you could be doing something else.
But several studies have proven that the time Americans spend fiddling with pennies
COSTS US MONEY!
As much as a billion dollars a year.
So every year American taxpayers pay 70 million dollars
to have the opportunity to LOSE a billion dollars in productivity costs.
There is no legitimate argument in favor of the penny.
Many studies have shown that it wouldn't raise prices.
It wouldn't cut charitable contributions.
The only institution in the world that benefits from the existence of the penny is a company in Greeneville, TN
called Jarden Zinc Products.
For everyone else in the United States,
pennies are not just worthless but incredibly expensive.
But that is not even the ultimate reason to get rid of the penny.
The ultimate reason is that, as I said in the beginning of this video,
money exists to facilitate the exchange of goods and services.
And pennies don't do that effectively!
All the places we usually use coins, like parking meters and vending machines,
DON'T ACCEPT PENNIES, BECAUSE THEY ARE WORTHLESS!
I AM TURNING INTO A GIANT SQUID OF ANGER!!!
You know the only thing I hate more than pennies, Hank? Nickels.
A nickel, which is worth five cents, takes more than nine cents to produce.
Imagine if you will, Hank, a situation
in which you walk into a bank and you say,
"I have here this nickel. Would you like to give me nine cents for it?"
And the bank says, "Yes."
That's what's happening with the US Mint.
The real solution is that we have three coins:
A dime, a fifty cent piece, and a dollar.
If we did this, we would save billions of dollars annually,
enough to pay for many of the job creation programs that politicians are fighting about on television all the time.
But we won't, Hank, for two reasons.
First, because we're a species of sentimentalists.
The only reason we have pennies is because people LIKE pennies, and they grew up with pennies,
and they like Abraham Lincoln.
But let me tell you, if Abraham Lincoln were alive today,
he would say, "Why is my face on a coin that is worth
"one twenty-sixth of what a penny was worth when I was president?"
And, second, because it is not an issue you can really fight about.
So, like, about half the major advocates for coinage reform in the last ten years have been
Republicans and about half have been Democrats, because it's not a political issue.
It's just a rational issue.
It's not the kinda issue that fires up your base or gets you reelected.
It's just something that's gonna save Americans billions of dollars
and create lots of exciting efficiencies in our economy and eliminate these DISGUSTING, bacteria-ridden
discs of suck that fail to facilitate commerce.
All right, but speaking of commerce, Hank,
just a reminder to Nerdfighteria: a vlogbrothers shirt
designed by nerdfighter Vondell Swain
is available for pre-order at dftba.com, link in the dooblydoo.
It's only available for one more week; if you want one, get it now.
We take PayPal, credit card, E-check... Really anything.
...Except for pennies.
...And nickels.
Hank, I'll see you on Wednesday.
