Some prehistoric creatures had some
crazy-looking features.
Let's talk about that.
♪ (theme music) ♪
- Good Mythical Morning!
- Now, there are some crazy-looking...
...animals on the face of the earth today.
Take a look at the platypus.
It looks like a couple of toddlers got
hold of a beaver and a duck...
- ...and went to work.
- Beaver and a duck.
- Yeah.
- That's right, man. They mate...
...and make those.
That's how it happens.
No, I'm saying, like, Legos.
I'm not talking about...
- Mating?
- ...that. I'm talking about, like...
...kids, like, (high voice) "Take this,
and put this, and then put it."
- But that's not how animals are made.
- Yeah, they are.
- That's not how it works.
- Beavers and ducks, all day long.
- Like rabbits, man.
- But, if you go back in the day...
...before beavers and ducks were
mating like rabbits, animals looked...
- ...even stranger!
- Yeah, they did. I'm talking...
...about prehistory, right?
Prehistoric animals?
- You are. Actually, we're talking about it.
- (laughing)
Here's the thing that we have to do.
It's very important. This is a serious...
- ...thing. Stop laughing.
- Yeah, yeah, come on, people.
What we have to do is: we've gotta rank
the weirdest-looking animals...
- ...in prehistory today.
- We've got to.
Because no one's done it yet, in the
correct way, and we're gonna determine
it, once and for all,
in a segment we call...
- ♪ (distorted electric guitar) ♪
- ...RANKED: Craziest-looking Prehistoric...
- ...Creatures Edition.
- (crashing sound)
As you can see, we have five slots here,
upon which we are going to rank
from craziest-looking to not as quite
crazy-looking...
- They're all kind of crazy-looking.
- ...But still in the top five...
- ...in the world.
- And in order to make an...
...unbiased decision, we have asked for
the help of the crew. They each have
a representative animal that they will be
arguing is the craziest-looking animal...
- ...starting with Stevie.
- Yes, what you are looking at is...
...called the longisquama. I think that's
wrong, but we're gonna go with it.
- The what?
- (Stevie) Long-gwee-skwama.
- Long-gwee-skwama.
- (Stevie) Yes! At first glance...
...you might think "hockey decor,"
like very evil hockey decor.
- Yeah.
- (Stevie) Shoving those sticks right...
- ...into that lizard holder.
- It's like that lizard was killed...
- ...by a hockey team.
- But I know that hockey did not exist!
- (Stevie) Exactly!
- So that's not hockey.
(Stevie laughing) So I'm gonna tell you
a couple things about this guy.
At the time, millions and millions of
years ago, he was actually banned from
attending auctions that involved paddles,
because they couldn't tell.
- "Is he getting it or not?"
- Yeah, yeah.
Right. Caused a lot of trouble at the
prehistoric hockey auctions.
I don't think that's real.
I don't think that's real.
- There weren't auctions back then.
- She's trying to trick us.
- Yeah. Misleading.
- She knows we like a good...
- ...orderly auction, so she's...
- (Rhett and crew offscreen laughing)
- ...playing to our weaknesses.
- Yeah.
He also was just perpetually being called
on in class. You know what I mean?
'Cause it' just like... you got that one.
Do you see the [theme] that's...
- ...happening here.
- (Rhett clapping and silently laughing)
- So you raised a hockey puck paddle.
- (Rhett) Yeah.
What's it called, a hockey stick?
Jen's not in here.
- Hockey stick. It's a hockey stick.
- (Stevie) Hockey stick.
It's not a hockey paddle. You should be
paddled for saying that.
So you're saying you raised a hockey stick
when you wanted to answer a question...
- ...in class.
- No, it's like a hand.
Yes, more so that. Also, it was actually
like a walking bar situation, like those
things were taps. Unfortunately, when
you pulled on any one, the liquid that
- ...came out was not desirable.
- Oh!
Ugh. 'Cause it was, like, lizard liquid.
It was a bodily fluid of a lizard.
- Not the kind of thing you want to drink.
- It was specifically pee. We'll just go.
- Okay. Yeah.
- Maybe pee. Maybe you make...
- ...another lizard. Maybe it's venom.
- Yeah.
- Ugh.
- It's all on tap.
All those things were not true,
that I just said.
- Yeah.
- Did you draw this?
- Did I draw it? Yes. (laughing)
- (crew laughing)
- (Rhett) So this was a real creature?
- (Stevie) It was a real creature.
(Stevie) At first I thought that it
had something to do with a bird,
because I thought those things were
feathers. But they're actually not;
they're just really long scales,
which is what the name means.
And that's true. That's the only
true thing I've said. But also,
another true thing: it's really
crazy-looking. And it deserves to be...
- ...in the number-one spot.
- (laughing) Okay.
- Well, it could be now, because...
- It is right now.
...it's the only thing. But we're gonna
put it down here. Thanks for all those...
- ...lies. You thoroughly confused us.
- Yes. Moving on to Kevin.
- (Rhett) What do ya got, Kevin?
- (Kevin) I'm gonna give you some...
- ...truth right here.
- (Link) Look at this!
(Kevin) This is the platybelodon.
Platybelodon means "flat teeth."
Yeah, he's got a couple of flat
teeth down there.
(Kevin) He has two of 'em right
there on the bottom.
(Kevin) That's his mouth that
you're looking at there.
- (Rhett) Yeah.
- That's an elephant with a mouth.
- I didn't think it was the anus.
- No, that's the front end.
So this guy lived in Asia, Africa,
and North America.
- Okay. Large swath.
- He was an herbivore. What he did was...
...he would use his bottom mouth to
shovel food into his whole mouth.
- That make sense?
- That is a crazy-looking elephant!
I mean, the thing is, I know how elephants
work nowadays.
- You do?
- Yeah, man. I studied the heck out of...
- ...elephants in photo form.
- Okay.
- I fed an elephant once.
- Yeah, we both touched an...
- ...elephant's tongue before.
- And,, you know, the tongue was...
...under the truck in a separate thing.
The mouth was totally separate.
You can't trick me. The mouth is not
part of the trunk.
No, no, no. I'm not tricking you.
I have proof.
Link, this is not an elephant.
This is a precursor.
- A lot of time has passed.
- Do you want some proof that...
- ...this is real?
- I'm not questioning that these...
- ...and just sketches.
- (crew laughing)
- I mean --
- I'm assuming these are all real...
...prehistoric creatures: that fossils
have been found.
This is crazy. This looks like something
out of a Pixar movie.
- (Rhett) Right.
- (Link) "Let's make elephants talk...
...to one another," like they made
cars talk.
- Right.
- Like, put a human mouth on an...
- ...elephant trunk is what they did.
- You've seen a human with a mouth...
- ...like that?
- I mean, it's human-esque.
It's an anthropomorphized
elephant face.
- Here's the thing though...
- (Rhett) Kevin, continue.
- ...I got a video.
- (Rhett) Thank you.
- I'm gonna play it for you.
- (Drew doing a voice) Hey, hey. Hey.
(Drew) What do you call a dinosaur that
likes explosives?
- (Drew) Dino-mite!
- (Link and crew laughing)
- Kevin!
- He's also really bad at telling jokes.
- Kevin. Kevin, you got...
- That's the thing about this guy.
- You animated... He Pixar-ed it!
- I actually wrote that joke, too.
- (laughing)
- Was that your voice or Stevie's voice?
- Uh, that was the voice of the creature.
- (Rhett) Yeah, man. Maintain the...
- ...frickin' illusion!
- (Link and crew offscreen laughing)
- It was Drew's voice.
- Oh, it was Drew's voice.
- It was Drew. Oh, it was nice, Drew.
- Well, I can wait my turn.
Okay. (laughing) Well, you know what?
It is your turn.
- Oh, great.
- (Link) that's crazy.
(Rhett) So what do you call that
thing again?
- The platybelodon.
- Okay, platybelodon. All right.
- Talking elephant.
- Moving on to Drew.
(Link) Now let's be real.
You did draw this.
Oh, come on! I didn't draw that.
It's very Napoleon Dynamite-looking...
- ...but I did not.
- (Link) Yeah, it's sketch-ish.
- (Drew) This is the embolotherium...
- (Rhett) Embolotherium.
- ...which means "wedge beast."
- Uh-huh.
Now this guy, he lived in Mongolia
around 30 million years ago.
That's what they call me at the
steak restaurant.
- Wedge beast?
- Yeah, 'cause I get that wedge salad.
- (Link and crew laughing)
- "Oh, the wedge beast is back!"
- You go beast on that...
- Uh uh uh uh! (laughing)
You go beast on that salad. (laughing)
This guy eats wedge salads?
Sure, yeah. He loves
a good sizzler salad.
- (Rhett) Yeah.
- He is obviously a mouth breather.
(Link) His nose is clogged up
with a shoehorn.
(Drew) Well, that's the thing: he's got
this ram that's attached to his face,
which makes him look pretty cool, I think.
And it looks like he sneezed in the
cold and the snot just kinda came up
and froze to his face.
- I doubt that's what happened.
- Is that... is that possible?
- (Rhett) No.
- (Link) For humans?
- Sure. Yeah. Yeah, happens all the time.
- (Link) In Fargo, or something?
- Yeah, it happened to me in Boston.
- (Rhett) In certain climates, yeah.
All the time. So he kind of looks like
a rhino on steroids. But his ram thing
would probably be better suited if he
played jai alai.
It's like a hammock for a
prehistoric man.
- Like, I'd crawl up in that.
- He's just kinda rock you to sleep?
- How big to do think this was?
- It's like a cradle.
Or how little do you think prehistoric
men were?
- (crew offscreen laughing)
- That thing's huge, man!
Tell 'em, Drew. A prehistoric man
could climb up in that hammock...
- I don't think so.
- ...and could be rocked to sleep.
- Of course.
- I don't think this one...
... -- I mean, honestly, sorry, Drew.
I don't think this one is that weird.
- Originally I thought that the...
- (Drew) Hm. That's weird.
...trees were part of its body, and then
I thought it was weird. But then when
I realized it was just like one of those
weird creatures that's down in
South America just with a thing on
its nose, I was like, "Kinda weird...
- ...but not super weird."
- You're expecting a rhino.
You're expecting to see a rhino, but then
it's not a rhino. Right?
- (Rhett and crew laughing)
- All right, Drew. Keep trying, buddy.
- You know, dig deep.
- Lizzie, what do you got?
- (Link) Look at her!
- Well, look. I would like to begin...
...my argument by saying I think that
impracticality is tantamount to...
- ...craziness. And this thing is...
- (Rhett) Uh-huh.
...the most impractical thing I've
ever seen. It has a circular saw for
a jaw. I don't understand how its mouth
closes. I don't think it does.
It's just, like, perpetually on a slide at
a water park where it's just getting
tons of water down its throat
at all times.
So it can't go (sucking noise). It can't
unfurl and...
- (Lizzie) No! No, no, no.
- ...and close?
What that is: it's called a tooth whirl,
which sounds like something a
hillbilly dentist might
call its practice.
- (Rhett and crew offscreen laughing)
- "Welcome to the tooth whirl!"
"I don't know what to do,
But I'll give it a whirl!"
- (Stevie laughing)
- "Take a spin!"
It looks like... the face of a shark
mated with a snail.
- Yeah.
- (Lizzie) It does!
- Is currently mating with a snail.
- Is that what happened?
(Rhett) A snail and a shark mated just
like a beaver and a duck.
- (crew laughing)
- Unclear, but I'll buy it.
Because any two animals can mate.
We already known that.
Absolutely. Donkeys and...
What's a mule?
- (everyone on and offscreen laughing)
- "What's a mule."
- That's a question for another day.
- (Lizzie) This thing...
It's actually teeth. Its old teeth get
pushed toward the middle of this
thing, and its new teeth come out at
the top, so it's just constantly producing
teeth. But I don't know how it
chews anything.
- It's like a tooth belt.
- Yeah! It's like a tooth belt.
- I'd like one of those.
- Well, here's the thing:...
...they're not exactly sure where
this lived, and some theorize
that the tooth whirl was inside
of its throat. So it was just...
- biting itself at any given moment.
- Oh, maybe there was skin on...
...the outside of this, but we don't know
because we just found a fossil.
- (Lizzie) Sure. Yeah.
- It looks like it'd be hard...
...to swim with that thing hanging off
your lip.
(Lizzie) Yeah! I'm telling you, it's
just water at all times.
Well, how do we know it wasn't
a land dweller?
- (Link) Good question.
- Well, it was found everywhere...
- ...from Idaho to China.
- I've had cold sores on my...
...bottom lip that have totally changed
my life for a few weeks, so I'm...
- ...feeling for this guy.
- If a cold sore turns nto...
- ...a tooth whirl...
- (crew offscreen laughing)
- All right, Alex. What have you got?
- (Alex) I man, take a closer look.
- (Link) What is this thing called?
- Well, how crazy does that look?
- (everyone on and offscreen laughing)
- I mean, it's real freaking crazy, man.
Do you feel like you're
hallucinating, maybe?
Yeah, like I'm seeing something in
a mirror that's in a mirror...
- ...that's in a mirror.
- Yeah, man. That's hallucigenia...
- ...you're looking at right there.
- Really?
- (Alex) That's its name, yeah.
- No.
- (Alex) Yeah! I don't know why!
- It's like a...
- (laughing)
- Is this like a prehistoric...
- ...comb for prehistoric small men?
- No, it's just the scariest looking...
- ...Easy Mac you've ever seen.
- What's the scale?
- It's about 3 centimeters long.
- Small.
Those little pre-mees, they call 'em --
prehistoric men --...
- (Alex) Yeah.
- They would comb, slick that back.
They comb their hair, and then they
go and get in their little nap sack...
- ... on that other beast.
- Right.
The wedge beast. And then
[inaudible] eat a salad.
- (crew onscreen laughing)
- Get wedged, eat a salad.
- That's a nightmare.
- This thing is, I mean...
- This is like a prehistoric caterpillar.
- Could be.
- (Link) With hooves. It' got hooves.
- (Rhett) Yeah.
(Alex) There's a slight caveat though:
scientists aren't sure it's actually
an animal. It might be
an appendage...
- (Rhett sputters in surprise)
- ...of another animal.
- (crew laughing)
- How crazy is that?
You know what? That makes it
better in my mind.
- That's what I'm saying to you.
- "You're so crazy-looking, I refuse...
...to believe that you exist
on your own."
- That's what I mean.
- "You've got to be attached to...
- ...something else."
- Can you tell what's the...
- ...top and what's the bottom?
- I can tell what's sharp and...
- ...what's not.
- Neither can the scientists, though.
They don't know which way. Look at
its head there, too.
(Alex) I really need you guys
[to get that].
- What do you mean by head, dude?
- That's what I'm saying.
Scientists aren't sure. The blob-like
head may actually be a stain that...
- ...appears in many specimens.
- A stain?
Yes. It's got a stain head. It's got
spike legs. It's got it all.
- (laughing) "It's got a stain head."
- (Alex) Absolutely insane.
(Link) This is like something that would
hold firewood.
(Alex) Three-centimeter firewood,
like a matchstick, maybe.
- (Rhett) Yeah.
- That's pretty much it.
Well, you guys have given
us a lot to think about.
Hm. Shall we retreat to our
layer of um... deliberation?
Decision? Our layer of deliberation,
I guess.
- Layer of deliberation. 
- I'm sorry, Drew. This one's...
- ...gonna be last.
- You put it in 1.
- Oh, thanks. I love that.
- (crew laughing)
Yeah, this is like something from
a kids' coloring book.
Yeah, I mean, color in the lines.
We gotta give merit for that.
- And, I mean, Stevie...
- Come on!
...you did a great job, but I feel
like this is a lot like a lot of...
- ...other things that I've seen.
- I thought that this was going...
...here until I head Alex talking
about it. And an confused as...
- ...the scientists are, that's gotta...
- (Drew) It's not even a real thing.
- ...count for something.
- You gotta put it at...
- ...number 2.
- I feel like that's at least...
...gotta go to number 2.
It could go to number one.
(Lizzie) Hold on. Scientists are
confused on mine, too.
They don't know where its circular saw
jaw went. That's pretty bad.
- It really comes down to these two, Link.
- I know. Even though the...
- He did an animation.
- Yeah... I took points away...
- ...for that.
- Yeah.
What's the difference between Kevin's
guy and my guy?
You guy's not in the running.
That's the difference.
- (laughing)
- Think the reason why this is...
to me, the weirdest looking thing
is because it's anthropomorphized.
There's a human-esque mouth and
teeth on something that otherwise
we would think of as normal. And that's
what makes that look weird, too.
I think that it's the same reason that
goes into both of the, but I'm
saying I think that this one is
craziest.
Well, this doesn't look like a human
mouth to me, Link.
- Which means that should be 3.
- Okay.
- And this should be 1.
- (Lizzie) No. No!
- Heyyyy, dino-mite!
- (crew offscreen laughing)
All right, even though you made
that video and I took points away,
Kevin, you have officially determined
the craziest-looking prehistoric animal.
- Is that talking elephant.
- Ladies and gentlemen...
...Mythicals Beasts everywhere, here
you have...
- The definitive list.
- Yes. Agree with us in the comments.
Scientists, we'd love to hear your
opinons. Not really.
Thanks for liking, commenting,
and subscribing.
- You know what time it is.
- My name is Ashlyn...
...and this is my sister, Anna.
And we're from Bremen, Georgia.
(both) And it's time to spin
The Wheel of Mythicality.
- Look out for Buddy System!
- (crack) Ow!
- You okay?
- (crew offscreen laughing)
- I really...
- Oh, I'm sorry, Link.
Did you hear that? That was
my forearm.
- Yeah. something broke.
- Episodes 1 and 2 of...
...Buddy System come out tomorrow!
You can see episode 1; everybody...
...can see it. Episode 2: for YouTube
Red subscribers.
I think I actually did break something.
It's really hurting.
- You gonna be okay?
- Show goes on, man.
- Do you need to watch...
- Click through to Good...
- ...a beaver and a duck?
- Mythical More, where I Google how...
- ...to put a stint on my arm.
- (Rhett) "Extras in a pirate movie."
- Arrr?
- No, hey...
- (crew offscreen laughing)
- Arr!
- Is this part of the act?
- Arr, no. You're just an extra, matey.
- (crew offscreen laughing)
- But are you really hurt?
- (laughing) Don't touch it.
- Because they have an on-set medic.
(stammering) And you could get good
heath care. 'Cause I know you don't
have any. Well, I can look at you and
tell you don't have any.
(laughing) They pay in gold?
- (Rhett silently laughing)
- (laughing) I pay.
[Captioned by Kevin:
GMM Captioning Team]
