

The Memory Thief

Book One

SARINA DORIE
Copyright © 2016 Sarina Dorie

All rights reserved.

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All rights reserved.

DEDICATION

To Charlie.
Table of Contents

Acknowledgements

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Afterward

Glossary

About the Author

A Sneak Preview of The Geari Wife

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

There is a lot that goes into a book, from the author, and everyone else in an author's life. It would have been easier if I had written a Japanese steampunk novel while I had actually lived in Japan, rather than seven years later. However, since I did wait, I am fortunate to have friends to go to for help. Corinna, I am so glad I have you as a resource to ask questions about Japanese culture and language.

Thank you, Charlie, for doing dishes and all the other household things so I could spend more time writing. Thank you, Mom and Laura for being my beta readers. Nina Kiriki Hoffman, Alex Bear and Kathy Oltion, you all have been helpful in the editing, formatting and proofreading process. Holly Lorincz, thank you for your encouragement as an agent and suggestion that I start selling my work on my own. You were the professional push I needed.

I appreciate all the feedback from Wordos, my critique group, and that of my previous critique groups who inspired me to keep going. Because of these writers, this story is what it is today.
Prologue

In the year 1513, Ponce de Leon sailed across the sea for the Americas, it is said, in search of the Fountain of Youth. What he found instead was the greatest archeological find of the last three hundred years; he stumbled upon a semi-intact warehouse of starships, star charts and blueprints abandoned by the explorers rumored to have set out from Earth millennia ago. With the recovery of the ancient technology of spaceflight, we have been able to craft steam-powered vessels to carry us to distant worlds. Each year that passes brings us closer to perfecting the technology.

—Charles Babbage, inventor, visionary and innovator of the steam-powered space craft

The thrumming of drums and chatter of voices swelled as the tree palace came into view. Wooden treehouses above us were linked with ladders, ramps, and bridges almost hidden in the dense canopy of leaves above our heads. I had never seen so many half-naked men and women walking about the jungle of the Jomon colony as I did at the gathering of the tribes. The captain and crew of surveyors walked alongside my younger sister and me, gaping.

The villagers around us in their colorful feathered skirts and leaf hats stared at us out of the corners of their eyes. Those of the visiting tribes stepped back from us, never having seen people with skin so pale or clothes so impractically extravagant.

My senses were overloaded with the sights and sounds around me. The aroma of meat roasting on spits made my mouth water and the fire smoke burned my eyes. Children who had met me on previous occasions called out greetings, though they still couldn't get my name and settled on "Heri-shichi" and "Furi-shichi" instead of Felicity.

My sister, Faith, diverted her eyes like a proper young lady. I made myself look straight ahead like nothing was amiss. Father gave up trying to cover my eyes and went back to fanning himself instead. He acted like his daughters hadn't seen or spoken with the villagers before.

He walked in the shade of an umbrella tree just ahead of me, sweaty and miserable in his off-world attire. His top hat did little to shield him from the sun, and he dabbed at the constant trickle of perspiration on his forehead and cheeks with his handkerchief before it soaked his beard. He checked his pocket watch again, probably grateful to look somewhere other than the bare-breasted old woman passing us. Faith walked beside him in her pale blue dress, looking just as uncomfortable in puff sleeves and her high collar. The lace of my own collar felt like a noose.

I was so busy staring about at the various tribes dressed in green loincloths or bodies painted with red dots that I didn't notice Taishi sneak up on us. He took my hand and yanked me off the path before Father could notice I was gone.

Taishi tugged me around purple ferns and through a frenzy of nose birds slurping nectar from tree lilies. His fingers were bronze and calloused compared to my fair skin. His long black hair whipped in my face several times, and I turned away laughing. I released his hand and panted against a tree to keep from falling over. Breathing the muggy air was like breathing syrup. My modern attire didn't help.

"Oh, you are caged. I forgot." He poked me in the ribs where the boning of my corset cinched my waist. His English was near perfect, his only grammatical imperfections having come from the United Worlds of America slang I had taught him.

"Indeed. Have you anything else for me to wear?" I asked.

"Yes, by the stream. But only if my Felicity-chan doesn't mind looking like an old man."

I rolled my eyes. My version of Jomon dress was far closer to what the elderly wore than the attire of a young lady my own age. What I was about to do would give my father enough of an apoplexy. I didn't need to show my knees and belly as well.

Taishi took my hand and we walked through the jungle at a more reasonable pace.

The chatter of people grew distant and the gurgle of water louder. We descended the slope to the stream bank. On a rock rested the woven tunic I had worn last time when Father hadn't been present in the village. I unbuttoned my blouse and threw it aside. I turned away and Taishi unlaced my corset. By now he was very good at helping me out of my corset and unmentionables.

He held my hands in his, staring for a long moment at the dark lines tattooed around my wrists. His black eyes twinkled. "Do you want to swim before going back?"

I glanced around the jungle. No one else was present.

He picked up the end of my long braid and tickled it against my cheek. "I'll guard for you." He ran back up the bank where he could watch the path.

I lifted my chemise to my knees and waded into the water. The chill was refreshing after the muggy heat of the day. I threw off my bloomers and chemise and sank into the water.

He glanced over his shoulder. "Am I allowed to peek?" The almond shapes of his eyes turned into crescents hugging his round-as-dumpling cheeks when he smiled.

I laughed. "Only if it doesn't distract you from being my lookout." I stood up and fetched my tribal clothes.

He didn't turn from the path as I dressed. I tied the loose tunic into place. It came nearly to my ankles, but the airy style did show off my shoulders and collarbone. When I joined Taishi at the top of the bank, he circled an arm around my waist. His smile was mischievous. "You know what else we could do?" He nodded toward the logs covered with memory moss on the other side of the stream.

From what I had read in the starship's computer, no other planet in the galaxy contained plants with the properties to transfer memories other than here on Aynu-Mosir. It had been nearly a week since we'd had the opportunity to slip off alone and share each other's memories as Jomon were wont to do when courting.

"You wagtail! You rake! Is that all you think about?" I teased. "Don't you think my father will be vexed enough seeing me dressed in Chiramantepjin attire? We'll be late. Are we to anger your mother too?"

He hugged me closer. "Yes. If we are both nails that stick out, neither of us will be hammered down as severely. Ne?"

I tucked my United Worlds clothes into a hollow in a tree. Taishi held my hand as we returned to the village. I savored the happy mood, knowing it wouldn't last long after we'd returned. The sultry air whispering through the jungle felt a million times lighter in these clothes. I kissed Taishi on the cheek and he pulled away.

"No, no. We haven't time," he said, making his voice stern despite the laughter dancing in his eyes. "We don't want to vex your father more. Tut tut."

The village bustled with three times as many people as usual. The native colonists walked on the wooden sky bridges in the tree canopies and hung out of hut windows in the boughs watching us. Tribes who had traveled for days—some for weeks—sat in the shade of umbrella trees, chatting amiably with the local villagers. The leaders and elders from the other tribes had come to meet my father. We were the first off-worlders most had ever seen.

I caught sight of Father checking his pocket watch. His face flushed redder when he saw me. Taishi gave my hand a reassuring squeeze before he slipped away to attend to his duties. Faith covered her mouth in horror at the sight of me and shook her head. Despite only being fifteen, she acted like she was a prudish old spinster.

My father fetched his bionical from his pocket. The bionic monocle fit over his eye and stayed in place due to the magnets implanted under his skin. The lenses flipped and the aperture widened to take me in. "What the blazes do you think you're doing? You will dress as a proper young lady and cover yourself!"

I lifted my chin. "You want to convince the Jomon to trade with us and give their consent for us to be here. Do you really think they'll see us as friends when we look so alien to them?"

"Diplomacy be damned! I will not have my daughter in such immodest dress, and I will not have you disgrace yourself with those." He nodded to the tattoos I had allowed the women of the Chiramantepjin tribe to adorn my wrists with. We had already argued about the tattoos earlier in the week when Faith had tattled on me.

"I'm old enough to decide what I want to wear, and if I'm going to be on the planet Aynu-Mosir, I will dress as the Jomon dress."

He raised his voice, drawing stares. "You are seventeen. You're too young to make such decisions for yourself."

I crossed my arms. "Is that what you told Mother when she ran off with you at the age of eighteen?"

He turned away in a huff and bid Faith to serve as translator for him. She beamed at the sudden attention. On the plus side, he didn't chastise me for disappearing.

It was only a moment before the Chiramantepjin leader, Taishi's mother, appeared, flanked by her attendants and the man who was their leader-in-training. Of all the times she had to approach, it had to be now while my father's temper was at its blackest? Taishi held a tray of refreshments. He gestured to his mother with a jerk of his head and made a face at me as if to say he'd been chewed out too.

The leader of the tribe bowed to us. Father bowed back, though not as deeply as Faith and I.

Nipa's gaze raked over the sweat stains under my father's arms and the perspiration trickling down his neck. She spoke in the Jomon language. "Maybe you should take off some clothes and make yourself more comfortable, ne?" She wore the sky-blue headdress of her tribe's animal, a shaggy beast's head with horns and tusks. Aside from her necklace of ume pits, her ceremonial skirt, and the geometric tattoo patterns over her arms, she was naked like the rest of her people. With her heavy headdress, she too was sweating.

Faith bit her lip. It was obvious she didn't feel comfortable translating. Father flipped through his book of phrases, attempting to sort out what she'd said.

"She wants you to take off your clothes and be civilized like them," I said.

Faith pursed her lips. She didn't correct my interpretation.

My father laughed, all smiles and diplomacy now. "Tell Nipa I will remove my hat when she removes hers."

She smirked when I translated. "Tell him that will only happen in my private chamber after sundown. He may come then, but my husband may not like him there."

Faith titled her head, absolutely baffled by the innuendo. I tried not to giggle. My father's cheeks flushed when I told him what she'd said.

Taishi muttered under his breath in English, no doubt so his mother wouldn't understand. "She doesn't even take off her symbols of office then. It's bad enough being in trouble with your mother, but having to be berated by the emperor in front of the elders is another matter."

Faith covered her smile. My father laughed. He liked Taishi, even if he didn't approve of me spending time unchaperoned with him. I could only hope he would like him enough that he wouldn't mind our relationship when we told him.

Nipa's eyes narrowed, no doubt understanding her son's insolent tone more than his words. "Son," she said sharply. She waved him forward to set carved melon bowls of cold tea in front of us.

Father tipped his bowl back and immediately drank. Faith and I exchanged annoyed glances. He'd already forgotten what we had told him about the etiquette we'd learned. She and I knew the Chiramantepjin customs better than our father and the rest of the ship's surveying party, since we'd been the ones to discover the native colonists of the planet. Faith held her cup out to the leader and offered her the first sip. I held mine out to Nipa's leader-in-training. He scowled at me and only pretended to drink. I didn't blame him after the way I'd passed on influenza to Taishi three years before.

Father checked his pocket watch before tucking it back into his vest.

Nipa bowed her head. "If you are refreshed, shall we go to our council room and meet with the other leaders? We have many great matters to discuss, ne?"

Faith translated.

I stared into Shoko Nipa's face, searching for a sign that she had considered my proposal and meant to speak to my father on the matter. Her visage was expressionless and stony like a good Jomon leader's was supposed to be. She was so much easier to read when she didn't wear her headdress and I could fully see her face. When she stepped into the role as Taishi's mother, I liked the warmth of her smile, so much like her son's. Donning the mask of her office, she was another person.

I spoke in Jomon. "Excuse me, Shoko Mama, er, I mean, Nipa." Drat! I bowed my head. I'd messed up already and used her name instead of title. Taishi locked eyes with me and smiled sympathetically. It gave me courage. "Pardon my intrusion, Nipa. During the meeting, will you—can I? Well." I cleared my throat. "Will it only be the business of the red diamonds and trade that are discussed, or will you also speak to your elders about the matter of permitting a union between our two peoples in marriage?"

"What?" Faith asked in English.

I shook my head at her. There was no point in her getting our father riled up over one more matter so soon after the fight about my attire. If he knew Taishi and I wanted to get married, and it wasn't the idea of the elders, he would forbid us to go about unchaperoned.

Father sighed in exasperation. "What has Felicity done now?"

Nipa didn't answer. She nodded to her son. "Attend to the guests' needs. See that the doctor, captain and other gaiyojin are entertained."

Taishi's smile disappeared and he trudged off. He was in trouble if she wasn't permitting him to come to the meeting.

We followed Nipa up the wooden ramp and ascended the tiers to her council chamber in the tree boughs.

Faith pinched my arm and said through clenched teeth. "Were you talking about Taishi and you? He wants to marry you?" Her eyes watered and she actually looked hurt.

"Don't tell," I said. Not that she ever heeded me when I asked this of her.

She huffed. "You could have told me."

Indeed, and have her tattle on me over one more matter? No, thank you.

Nipa bade us to sit to her right in the round room. Other tribes sat in a circle with us. No one smiled, nor did they look friendly. My stomach clenched. I told myself it was the mask headdresses covering the upper half of their faces that made them look more formidable. It couldn't be that they wanted us to leave their world.

Nipa bowed to the room and in turn, everyone bowed to her. She introduced each man and woman in the circle while Faith and I took turns translating. There were seven tribes in attendance. The Isepojin of the south wore white headdresses covered in a dozen colossal ears that might have resembled a rabbit's had they not been pink and scaly like a lizard's. Their accent was so thick I could barely understand the head man and woman.

The Tanukijin leader wore a green and purple headdress, which covered her face. The tusks and horns added to her formidable frown. She wore little else, nor were the elderly wise men and women from her tribe attired in much more. The Cikapjin wore giant wings and were painted in bright colors to resemble what I suspected was some kind of leathery bird. From the name, I knew the Cepjin were fish people or must have lived near the sea, but their clothes were made of red and yellow feathers. They stared openly at me and I wondered if they might have had different customs about eye contact. There were two more tribes who had traveled weeks to attend the meeting of the seven tribes, the Tatsujin and Tokkonijin, the dragon and snake clans.

Everyone butchered my name when they repeated it. It had taken months for Taishi to grow accustomed enough to the sounds in our language to pronounce my name.

Nipa bowed her head and said, "The tribes of Aynu-Mosir have gathered here to discuss a specific purpose today. We have gone thousands of years without contact with our home world of Earth. Do we wish to establish peaceful relations with these explorers or ask them to leave?"

I translated. My father mopped at his forehead with a handkerchief.

The breeze from the window brought with it a funny smoke smell unlike the campfires of meat cooking below. A metallic twinge mixed with ozone stung my nostrils and reminded me of laser cannon fumes. An old man nearest the window wrinkled up his nose. The smell was out of place in the forest, as was the sound that followed. The low rumble, a noise in between an engine and an animal, grew from a purr to a roar. Outside came a crack and loud popping. Something large crashed through the trees. Someone below the tree palace screamed.

I thought I heard someone yell the word tatsu. Dragon. One of the Isepojin turned to the dragon clan and pointed, shouting. "You vowed not to bring your leviathans into this province. You have betrayed us!"

The Tatsujin leader snarled something back.

Nipa jumped to her feet, her headdress falling to the floor. I stared in horror, knowing something had to be wrong if she was more concerned about what was going on outside than her all-important symbol of leadership. She pointed to the door and yelled something. I couldn't hear her over the screams. Blood pounded against my eardrums. The roof of the thatched hut above our heads exploded in fire.

The meeting of the tribes came to a premature end.

Chapter One

Upon the acquisition of the planet of Louisiana, in the year 1803, the government of the United Worlds of America directed its attention toward exploring and improving the new space territory. Soon we will be surveying other planets we have acquired.

—Meriwether Lewis, the Lewis and Klark Expedition, 1814 IS (Intergalactic Standard)

My stomach fluttered with a mixture of excitement and trepidation at the idea of returning to the planet I had once considered home. After months of travel I was here, and I might at last be able to retrieve my memories from the man who had stolen them seven years before.

When I set foot outside the spaceship, I expected to be greeted by the same jungle I had known as a little girl. Yet I hardly recognized the world before me. The mountains I recalled were flattened, and mounds of snow dotted a patchy forest. Icicles on trees glittered in the sunlight. The planet I had known had never been cool enough to freeze.

Captain Ford said from behind me, "I thought this planet was supposed to be tropical." His United Worlds of America accent was like my late mother's, only more of a coarse drawl.

I turned to the elderly man. "Are you certain this is the same region of the planet? This looks like the northern province."

He leaned against the doorframe of the ship. His weathered face looked haggard as he stared at the expanse of dead-looking land in disgust. The gothic-style arches around the door of the interplanetary steamship, solar sails and gleaming metal looked out of place on the alien world. The ticking of gears and hiss of air within jarred against the silence around us.

The starship captain tipped his cap at me, his vexing smirk in place. "These are the coordinates in your father's log."

My father. I slid a hand into the pocket of my skirt, reassured his pocket watch still ticked. Being on the planet where he had died was less of a cathartic goodbye than I had hoped. My chest felt tight and constricted. I wished more than ever to be free of my corset so I could, for once, breathe. The chilling wind sent goosebumps up my spine and loosened blonde curls from my bun.

Meriwether placed a hand on my elbow. His eyes held the same concern they always did after I had slipped out of his sight. "There you are, Felicity dear. Where is your cloak? You'll catch a chill." His British accent was crisp and clear, more refined than my own with its hint of the Americas from my mother. He waved his hand at his father's manservant. "Charbonneau, would you be so kind to fetch Miss Earnshaw's cloak?"

I tore my gaze away from the stretch of barren land. "Really, you needn't fuss over me like this."

"It's too much for you, isn't it? Do you need a minute, Felicity dear?" His green eyes were filled with such love and concern, it was hard to not feel affection for him. The cool wind tousled the brown hair tied at the nape of his neck and stirred the ruffles of his cravat. His elegant features and noble bearing always attracted the attention of ladies at balls—and sometimes the men as well.

I gave him a grateful smile. If there was one person who knew what I had been through it would be my fiancé, as he had been the first one to find me on the planet seven years before. Had it not been for the miracles of space-age medicine, I might not have survived at all.

"Are you two going to stand here dilly-dallying and making goo-goo eyes at each other, or are we going to get a move on?" Captain Ford asked in his usual grumbly voice.

Meriwether sighed in exasperation. He might have been appointed leader of the party, but it wouldn't have surprised me if Lord Klark had secretly hired the captain to ensure his son didn't get in a fix.

The party, made up of surveyors, prospectors and crystal ore experts, stood behind the captain. It had been no picnic traveling for the last year with this rough group of men, though I suspected I was far more used to the coarse talk of the working class than was my fiancé. The only one whom I trusted not to stab us in the back, if it profited him, was old Charbonneau, Lord Klark's personal servant.

Charbonneau handed me my bonnet and cape.

I shook my head at the laser muskets the men packed. "Should we encounter any first-world colonists, we would be seen as less of a threat if we brought gifts instead of arms."

"The only natives who still exist are in the minds of fanciful girls," said the captain's mate.

I ignored the remark. At the age of twenty-four, I was far closer to being an old maid than a girl. Even so, it was no surprise that my words weren't heeded.

The captain's mate remained behind with the ship to draw in the solar sails and rewind our launch mechanism should we need to take off again. The rest of us set out, intending to find the river where my sister and I had once found the stones Lord Klark coveted. Though my guardian assured me he could find no trace of indigenous people and they had died off, I wondered if we might cross paths with the Chiramantepjin tribe or any others. I loathed myself for hoping Taishi and his family were still alive. I hadn't decided yet if I wanted to see him. Not if he was the one who had stolen my memories. Yet if I was to retrieve what I had lost, I would have to face him. That was the only reason I had returned.

We traveled for several miles, well past the valley and into the area where homes had been camouflaged in the thick canopies of trees. The jungle was now sparse and charred. Miles away, the green of trees appeared out of the mist nearer the mountains.

"You've gotten us lost, haven't you?" one of the men grumbled.

I lifted my chin. "No, not at all. It's simply a matter of where the Chiramantepjin people now reside. You can't expect them to live in the exact same place after seven years." Especially if their climate had changed.

"Fourteen years," the captain corrected under his breath.

Indeed, I kept forgetting about the difference in time. Hyperjumps took seconds, but traveling to those launch points took over a year to get to from this world.

Meriwether lent me his hand as I stepped over a charred log. When he skidded on a slick patch of ice, I suspected he was more apt to need assistance over the rugged terrain than I. The men continued to grumble about my assertions.

"If I might be so bold," Charbonneau said. "Lord Klark reported that the savages left on this planet died long ago. All that remains is their ruins. What the first U.W.A., United Worlds of America, surveyors witnessed were modern colonists posing as natives in an attempt to assert a claim on the planet for their own. The British Empire of Planets has run these common criminals off the planet."

I frowned. The Jomon weren't actually natives or aliens, but humans like us who had set out from ancient Japan in the first era of spaceflight millennia ago.

Meriwether looked to me with a question in his green eyes. His perfectly shaped lips parted as if to dispute this, but I linked my arm through his, drawing his attention. I gave the slightest shake of my head. Even when cross, as he was now, he was unequivocally handsome. So much so that he was often accused of genetic modifications and surgeries. I knew I should have felt pleased to know he was my betrothed, yet I could only feel unsettled at our impending marriage. It was a feat in itself that I had delayed marrying for this long.

Captain Ford scratched his straggly gray beard and nodded whence we came. "I say we go back to the ship and land elsewhere."

Meriwether bit his lip, the gesture making him look even more boyish and inexperienced. "Well, um, I suppose we could do that."

"We need to find a river or a body of water," I said. "That's where you'll find red crystal ore."

"Indeed, splendid idea. Let's do that from the ship," Meriwether said, no doubt attempting to please us both.

The air chilled as we headed back. One minute it was cool and balmy, nothing a cloak and bonnet couldn't handle. If anything, the exercise along the steep valley trail made me insufferably hot. Storm clouds gathered in the sky and roiled above us, the air turning icy and wind picking up. Snow fell thick and dense so that within minutes we could scarcely see a few feet in front of us.

Charbonneau lagged behind and I placed an arm around him to keep the feeble old man from falling over in the wind.

"We have to hail the ship to retrieve us!" Meriwether shouted over the howl of wind.

The falling snow scattered the signal to our ship and we couldn't get word to the captain's mate onboard. Everything that could have possibly gone wrong did.

In a matter of minutes, we trudged through large drifts and my petticoats and skirt were soaked, weighing me down. We huddled together for warmth. The more we walked, the surer I felt we traveled in the wrong direction. I pulled my cloak more tightly around me and tucked my freezing fingers under my arms. One of the men lost his bowler hat in the wind.

When I heard the distant half howl, half growl of the chiramantep, a giant bear-like beast, I knew we were not just in danger of the weather, but predators. Another howl came, this time closer, and another on the other side. They were surrounding us and closing in fast. A large shape thundered past us on the right. Through the haze of the thick snow, a bright blue creature rushed closer. Atop was a rider.

A mixture of terror and hope alighted in my heart. Lord Klark assured me all indigenous people were dead, but I had known these people were survivors. His immense mining ships might not have had problems on the planet, but smaller, independent vessels were often mysteriously destroyed while planetside. I had suspected tribes still existed.

I now had a job to do. My true job, not as guide, but as translator.

One of the men fumbled for his gun. I could thank the cold for numbing our fingers, else he might have been quicker. Already the air smelled of ozone as they powered up the laser guns.

"Don't shoot!" I screamed and waved my hands frantically to get their attention. If anyone was going to help us in a snowstorm it would be one of the native people who knew the land.

"Lower your laser muskets," Meriwether shouted.

The riders circled, eyeing us warily. These chiramantep were far larger than any I had ever seen. And was it my imagination, or did their protruding incisors and hefty tusks look more lethal? The riders were bundled in green and purple furs, obscuring their features. I spoke in the native tongue, or what I remembered of it. "We have come seeking the tribal leaders for trade and friendship."

The deep gravelly voice of an old man said in the Jomon tongue, "Friends do not start conversations with weapons." He nodded to one of the other bundled figures in purple and green. "What say you, Yoshirou?"

The whistle of the wind carried away the other man's words, though the anger in his tone was not lost. The voice of a female warrior spoke out next. "What new diseases do these 'friends' bring us? Better to be rid of them now before they breathe their sicknesses on us."

My voice rose, high and frantic. "We're vaccinated. We've cleansed ourselves. And we bring gifts of medicine in our ship." Not that we had much in the way of vaccines with us at the moment.

"What are you saying?" Meriwether whispered.

I shook my head at him.

The warriors bickered for a long moment before the old man leading the party silenced them. "Give us your weapons and we will keep our chiramantep from gorging on your entrails," the warrior said.

Dare I repeat his words and invoke the hot-headed wrath of our party? In the time it would take for the men to shoot, the beasts would go into a blood frenzy and eat everyone.

I had learned long ago some words were better left untranslated. I bowed my head and spoke with the monotone used for polite, formal speech. "Pardon our rudeness. Please wait but a moment for me to explain and our party shall be happy to comply."

To the party, I said, "A gesture of friendship is needed. I advise you to lay down your arms."

The men shifted uneasily. A gust of wind blew against us. Snow found its way under my bonnet and collar. I shivered and ducked my head from the wind.

Meriwether eyed the natives. "Is that truly wise?"

"For crying out loud, I'm freezing my arse off," the captain said. "Whatever you decide, lad, decide it before my balls go blue."

Meriwether laid down his laser musket. His men eyed the Jomon warily. Old Charbonneau followed suit. It was the captain, though, who would determine our fate. Lord Klark's men were far more likely to follow the direction of a captain they had worked with than Meriwether's. Slowly, Captain Ford crouched down. He kept his eyes on the bundled figures as he lowered his laser pistol. I thought the rest of them might heed my advice.

One of the chiramantep jerked its head forward and sneezed, a ferocious sound the men were surely unaccustomed to. I opened my mouth to explain, but Mr. Murray leveled his laser musket at the beast and fired. A pulse of blue light shot from the weapon.

"No!" I screamed.

Meriwether slammed into me, knocking me into the frigid snow. He shielded my body with his. He shouted something, but what he said I couldn't tell over the droning buzz of laser fire and the roars of beasts and men.

The chiramantep snarled all around us, enraged. Bursts of light exploded above. Hearing the crunch of bones and the screams of men, I squeezed my eyes shut. Death by giant blue fuzz-beast was not the way I wanted to go.

The chiramantep growled and snorted for a long while before they sounded under control. My heart thundered in my ears as the growls and grunts died down. The only sound left was Meriwether panting in my ear. His arms shielded my face, cocooning me in warmth.

"Are you well? Did you get hit?" Meriwether asked.

"Get up," a rough voice said in Jomon tongue.

A rider hauled Meriwether to his feet. Crimson puddles stained the snow. One of the chiramantep buried its face in a man's entrails. A flap of human skin hung off the tusk of another. Old Charbonneau stood at spear point, hands raised. His face was as pale as the snow around us. The captain sat on the ground, holding his arm. From the charred sleeve, I took his injury to be a laser wound from one of his own men. I felt like I was outside of myself, watching a holo on a screen of someone else. All this death couldn't be real. Only when I realized I sat in a puddle of someone's blood did I move to scoot out of it.

My stomach clenched but it was Meriwether who vomited. The Jomon swore and stepped back.

One of the Jomon lay dead in the snow, another injured. The cerulean blue of chiramantep blood and the red of men's blood marred the beasts' pelts. I could now see they had numbered seven to our sixteen, though their beasts had been the faster and more ferocious.

One of the chiramantep snapped its jaws and moaned in bloodlust.

If only I had prepared the party for what could happen. If only I had told them more about the chiramantep and the Jomon on the voyage. Lord Klark had warned me what might happen if I shared what I remembered of my past. He'd been right. They scoffed and laughed at what I had told them. My pride had been too hurt to try again.

The Jomon searched the men, confiscating laser pistols, blades and electronics. A female rider nudged one of the bodies with her leather boot. Satisfied he was dead, she appropriated his coat and bowler hat. They bound the hands and feet of Meriwether, Charbonneau and Captain Ford. No one paid me any mind. I sat, shivering in the blanket of white falling over me. I wanted to let the snow envelop me until I became invisible to them, but I knew the lives of the others depended on my skills.

"What will you do with us now?" I asked. "Do you intend to punish us for the folly of the man who started the fight? It was not our will to create bad blood between our peoples. He didn't understand—"

"We do not kill unarmed elderly and children," the female warrior said.

I looked to the captain and Charbonneau. I supposed they were the old men.

Meriwether's eyebrows shot up, his face looking more boyish and naïve than ever. "What did she say?"

I shook my head at him. I addressed the head of their party. "What will you do with us?"

"You will be our guests," he said. Or at least I thought they used the word guest. I was a little rusty. Mayhap that was the word for captive. He bid me to hand him my possessions. My heart sank to new lows as they spotted the chain to the pocket watch hanging from my skirt and took that too.

There was argument over whether they would bind me in addition to the men. I wasn't sure if this was unusual. Women held equal rank to men, and I suspected there was no reason not to treat me the same as the men. I struggled to keep up with the quick words.

"Where will you take us?" I asked. "Do you know the Chiramantepjin province? They will know me. They will speak on my behalf and attest I come here in peace."

The woman snorted. "The people of the chiramantep clan are dead."

My heart sank. I didn't know if I would ever retrieve my memories if Taishi—or perhaps another of his tribe who had stolen them—had died.

The warrior's next words sent me into further dismay. "We need not ask who you are. I recognize you from the meeting of the seven tribes, Felicity, daughter of the star man."

Chapter Two

The courtyard and the streets were crammed when we went to the ball, and the anxiety of the people to see poor stupid me was very great, and I must say I am quite touched by it, and feel proud, which I always have done, of my planet and of the territories in space which I am to rule.

–Queen Victoria on her coronation in 1838, Earth Standard

Meriwether found me on the planet seven years, two months and eight days before my return. I lay in a small, crude hut, asleep. He crawled in to get out of the jungle rainstorm, hoping there were no natives or wild beasts within what he took to be a cave in the side of a hill. He came upon me instead.

He often said he felt like a fairytale prince. I suppose one might have mistaken him for a prince, with his fine clothes and smooth features. He wore his brown hair in a ponytail like an older gentleman, though he was young like me, mayhap seventeen. When he leaned down to kiss me, I woke, screamed, and slapped him.

I lay sticky with sweat and aching all over. My head pounded and I felt ill. I clutched my father's pocket watch to my chest, though I had no awareness of how it came into my possession. Disoriented and confused, I didn't know where I was or why I lay in a bed of woven vines and animal skins, clad in little more than a thin blanket that clung to my sweaty body. I covered myself as best I could, not losing all my wits. I noticed the full sleeve of Chiramantepjin-style tattoos on my arms. I had no idea how I'd come to be here. My last memory was the gathering of the seven tribes.

The mere effort of moving sent throbs of fire through my insides. My scream turned into cries of pain. I collapsed in exhaustion. My insides hurt, and sharp pain stabbed between my legs when I tried to sit up. Something bad had happened, I knew. It wasn't just my memory I'd lost.

"Are you ill? Injured?" Meriwether asked. "What do you need?"

The earth thudded with running feet outside. The man I later came to know as Lord Klark shouted, apparently thinking it was his adolescent son who had screamed. They practically tore the walls down getting in.

"My god! Clementine? What in the blazes are you doing here?" said a man in dripping finery that was out of place on this world.

I noted the way he used my mother's given name, but I was still in such a shock, and now more terrified than ever at being found by a group of men while in my naked and weakened state, that I hardly took any notice. Lord Klark threw his drenched cape over me and ordered his men to leave. Meriwether remained.

"Pardon my error. I mistook you for someone else." The gentleman kneeled beside me and took up my hand. "What is a young lady doing on this planet? What is your name, child?"

"Who are you? You aren't one of the Santa Maria's crew," I said. "Where's my Poppy?" I tried to remember where I was and why I was there. Surely I was still on Planet 157, the world Father had been sent to survey. I knew I was in a Jomon hut, though this one was far less elegant that those I remembered in the Chiramantepjin village. My memories went as far back as the gathering of the head Nipa from each of their provinces. There had been a great rumble of thunder, and the earth had shook. I felt something horrible had happened, but what it was I couldn't quite say.

I clasped the pocket watch in my hands, feeling grounded by the tiny ticks in my palms.

It took several minutes before we had it all sorted out. The man was a lord and prospector with his own party. He stared, looking as befuddled as I felt. "You are the only survivor of the surveying party? And you don't remember any of it? Not even your father's death?"

Tears stung my eyes and my throat closed so tight it hurt to speak. "I don't believe you." I didn't remember him dying anyway.

"Poor child, you don't know what happened?" At seventeen, I was hardly a child, but I didn't correct him as he went on. "There was some kind of meeting of the tribes. But the savages betrayed your father and killed him and all in his party. They destroyed the ship. Don't you remember?"

I shook my head. Taishi's tribe, and the others I had met, would do no such thing. At least, I didn't want to believe they could do such a thing. I remembered something about the Tatsujin and dragons, but their faces were a blur and I wasn't sure if it was a dream.

I smoothed my finger over the surface of the pocket watch, rubbing off the smear of crusted blood. "What of my sister?"

"Dead like everyone else. It's a miracle you survived. But truly, you have no recollection? Not even of the ship being destroyed? It wiped out half the jungle and killed most of the tribal people. You are the first trace of a living person we've found." He smoothed a hand over my hair like a father would have.

I fell back into to bed and sobbed. My muscles ached from fatigue and my head pounded worse than ever.

Lord Klark pressed a hand to my forehead. "Good god, you're feverish, child."

Meriwether patted my shoulder, trying to console me. I'm ashamed to admit, I might have elbowed him in the ribs.

"May I keep her, Father?" Meriwether asked. "We'll take her to the ship and I'll nurse her to health."

Lord Klark turned to his son. "I need you to fetch the ship's doctor. This girl is injured and ill. She may die if you don't hurry."

I felt like I was dying, anyway, inside and out.

Meriwether took off.

Lord Klark picked up a blood-soaked piece of fabric from the corner and dropped it. He leaned in closer and took my face in his hands. "Now that my son is gone, child, I ask you to tell me what you truly remember. You say you don't remember, but I think you don't want to remember. You must try."

"Truly I cannot. Someone stole my memories," I said. I then explained what I thought had happened, as much as it shamed me to do so. Though I left out the detail that I thought I had been physically violated, he warily eyed the blood under my fingernails and glanced at the rust-colored stains on the furs and woven clothes. Only, there was too much blood to account for. Could some of it have been someone else's? It was old and the entire hut smelled rancid.

I felt dizzy and leaned back and rested.

The doctor tried to examine me when he came, placing his hands on my knees to part my legs. Being a lady and unaccustomed to such boldness, I kicked him in the face. I don't remember him sedating me but he must have. Later I overheard the maids whisper while they thought I was asleep, that I was weak from loss of blood and sick with an infection. Had I not been found, I would have died. They had overheard the doctor tell Lord Klark I had been violated. From the evidence of the stitches holding the wound together, I suspected I had proof.

Still, I didn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it.

I was relieved Meriwether wasn't present as Lord Klark spoke to me in the cold, white hospital of the ship, especially since I later came to know his son so well. "This is most unfortunate. Why your father ever saw it fit to bring young ladies to an uncivilized world in the first place is a mystery to me. If people know what you've been exposed to, they will treat you as a pariah. Your reputation as a lady will be ruined. No man will ever have you if they know you have been left unchaperoned with savages. You must not speak of your experiences on the planet, lest people think less of you. Do you understand?" He took my hand. "I will, of course, do all in my power to keep you safe from such gossips while you are my charge. Such matters need not cause you worry."

I stared at the sterile walls, so plain and unnatural after the vivid color of the jungle. The smell was acrid compared to the musky perfume of the trees and earth. Tears slid down my cheeks as he ranted. I had no family and no home. If any of my Chiramantepjin friends were still alive, I didn't know if they were friends anymore.

Lord Klark stroked his beard, eyeing me through his monocle. "Truly, all your memories were stolen? You remember none of the attack?"

When I closed my eyes I saw myself running through thick foliage, others screaming and passing us by. I felt the heat of fire and choked on the thick smoke of burning flesh. I pulled my sister with me, trying to carry her, but when I tried to turn back to see her, there was no more memory. I retrieved a snippet of Taishi tugging me to the river, my heart racing.

The image that came to me next contained the box of herbs used for memory exchange by the natives of the planet.

In my five years on the planet, I had learned how the plants were used to remove memories and give them to someone else. When I closed my eyes, I felt my hands on warm shoulders, my memories wicking away. It wasn't just a few minutes' worth of memories, as was the custom in a memory exchange, but a great span of time. I couldn't imagine myself giving up these memories freely. I didn't know why, but someone had wanted to keep something about that attack secret, or perhaps simply the attack on me.

As much as I hated to consider the idea, there was only one person I would have been close enough to exchange memories with. The idea that the man I loved had stolen them was worse than the physical pain I was in.

But not by much.

There was one reason, and only one reason I was on Planet 157 serving as guide and now translator to Meriwether's surveying team. I wanted my memories back from the memory thief.

Of course, there was also the matter of tracking Taishi down and finding out if he had been the one to steal my memories. I didn't yet know how I would make him give them back—or even if he lived after what I had been told.

Dressed in vivid green and purple furs made from the hides of the raccoon dogs they called tanuki, the tribal people wore their clan animal with pride. Flickering flames from fires in pits along the walls danced over the stone architecture of the great hall and the Tanukijin warriors surrounding us. The elders placed offerings before the altar at the front of the room. Many of the warriors wore headdresses of the horned raccoon dogs, burying their true faces behind the monstrous ones. Only their bronze limbs were visible, hinting at their humanness.

The entire room stank of the dried fish hanging from the rafters of the ceiling, wood smoke and fermenting vegetables. My stomach churned from smelling the putrid body odors caused by eating such a diet.

Meriwether's pallor was green and I worried he might grow ill again. He covered his mouth and nose with his handkerchief. Charbonneau looked as though he were breathing from his mouth. Captain Ford might have been in too much pain from his burned arm and a leg wound to care.

The villagers sat around us, giving our party a wide berth. This tribe resembled the other I had known. People possessed the same black hair and swarthy skin typical of those with Jomon ancestry. A hundred pairs of almond-shaped eyes pretended not to study us. Only the children stared openly. I had long ago perfected the art of using my peripheral vision, and with this I studied them in return. Unlike the Chiramantepjin of long ago, these people were thin and emaciated. I thought of the space station Lord Klark owned and how well-fed all citizens were—even the poor.

I elbowed Captain Ford's good arm when I caught him ogling a young mother nursing her child. "Don't stare. The Jomon find it rude."

He loosened his cravat. "She keeps looking at me."

I didn't bother to argue that she was using her peripheral vision—which wasn't considered rude. I focused on the greater point. "You don't dress like anyone they have ever seen, and they think you're less than human. You're devils. Foreigners. Gaiyojin."

"I'm not human to them?"

Had the tribe been clad in waistcoats and top hats like citizens of the British Empire of Planets, or the women in frocks with puff sleeves and ruffles like mine, my party would not have found them so alien. But the calf-length skirts made of hides, fur-lined tunics and half-dressed women were a shock to those who had lived on asteroids, ships and space stations where such attire would be deemed scandalous. The appearance of the planet's natives bothered me far less than it once had.

I was more concerned with the men beneath the masks. The warrior who had taken us to the village had ignored my questions when I'd asked him if there were other survivors. Among these faces I could find none who looked familiar.

I kneeled in the same manner as the Tanukijin people in the large hut. I removed my bonnet and gloves before the stuffy room grew more stifling. Charbonneau and Meriwether sat cross-legged as our people were wont to do. Charbonneau kept rubbing his wrist where he had been bound. Captain Ford reclined as best he could with his wrapped injuries, as he had not only the shot to the arm, but a chiramantep bite to the leg. He eyed the spears and muttered complaints to Meriwether. I could only attribute his obliviousness to the danger we were in to the fact that he was in pain. Or he was a dolt.

Purple-and-green-striped pelts covered the windows and doors of the stone room, keeping the heat from the fires in and the raging blizzard out. I unfastened the clasp of my cape, letting it fall to the dirt floor. Truth be told, I would have rather rid myself of the cumbersome clothes of my people and worn the airy skirts and coverings I had grown used to in my teenage years.

When scantily-clad maidens set cups of steaming liquid before us, Captain Ford licked his lips. "Is it safe to drink? Would they poison us?"

More maidens set down platters of meat and vegetables and stepped quickly back. Now that we were no longer bound, it was difficult to tell if we were guests or prisoners.

"It depends what you mean by poison." I eyed the liquid, knowing from the strong smell that it was a drink of fermented grain called shochu. "They won't do anything to make us ill. If they wanted to kill us, they would have already. But—"

Meriwether lifted a spoonful of sticky greens with one of the hashi, a stick-like utensil on his plate. I placed a hand on his arm. "Have a care not to drink or eat anything until the chief thanks their local deities and he drinks his own."

"According to the guidebook, it says I am to—"

I kept my voice low, more because he would interpret my harsh tone as rudeness than the Jomon would. "Your guidebook was written hundreds of years ago about the Jomon descendants in Asia and North America on Earth, not the Jomon colonists as they exist today. Nor does it take into account the local traditions and regional differences of the tribes. Put that plate down before you offend our hosts."

Frowning, Meriwether set it down.

The captain leaned back again. "She isn't your superior, you know. If that was my woman, I'd put her in her place." He dabbed at his sweating face with his handkerchief.

I studied the staring natives sitting past the guards. Now wasn't the time for one of his diatribes.

Charbonneau bumped into Captain Ford's injured leg, which brought on a string of curses from the old star dog.

"Terribly sorry. I see you're still bleeding," said Charbonneau. "Might I rewrap that for you, Captain?"

Meriwether fidgeted and looked to me with apologetic eyes. He was too reticent for his own good. Another reason he made a poor leader for an expedition. Had I not been born a woman, my experience on the planet would have qualified me to lead the mission.

Captain Ford opened his mouth—which was never a good sign. "If you ask me—"

I was saved from another cutting remark when the drumming started. At last the tribal elders made their entrance. In the Jomon native tongue, an old, toothless woman in the raccoon dog headdress thanked the nature spirits and then their ancestors for their blessings. People around us bowed, first to the elders and then to the shrine beside the throne. I joined in the bowing, the gesture coming naturally and automatically after the years I had lived on the planet. Meriwether dipped his head and gave a confused, half bow.

"Miss Earnshaw, what's she saying? They aren't about to eat us, are they?" Charbonneau asked.

I shook my head and whispered, "That's one of the tribes descended from Sumerians on the Gearheart Colony in the Western Milky Way." I couldn't help adding, "Jomon hardly ever eat people." I tried not to laugh at his startled expression. I wondered if my father's party had been this ignorant when we'd come here last.

At the thought of my father, my breath hitched in my chest—and it wasn't just because my corset was too tight. I was reminded of the danger of this world. My father and sister had died the last time I had been here. I could have died earlier in the attack, and still might. I pressed my hand to my pocket, remembering too late my father's watch was gone.

I had begged to be part of this mission, wishing more than anything to find out what had happened to my memories the last time I had been on this planet. As I was a young lady in his charge, and his son's betrothed, Lord Klark had been reluctant to allow me to return. Meriwether had insisted my knowledge of the land and where to find the sought-after red diamonds might succeed where the mining operations had failed. Meriwether also knew that my knowledge of language and customs made me a better liaison and translator than any of his men who denied the existence of Jomon culture.

Only now, with the mob of natives seated around us, did I wonder if I was truly ready to be back. The idea of being in the den of my enemy unsettled me.

Dancing started. When the male dancers came out in loin cloths that left little to the imagination, Meriwether covered my eyes with his top hat. Probably best to let him believe I had never gazed upon nudity in my time here. He dropped his hat when women wearing skirts of furs and little else danced before the altar at the front of the room. Captain Ford nudged Charbonneau, who diverted his gaze and scratched at his wrists.

Meriwether cleared his throat. "The guidebook said Jomon attire themselves modestly." My fiancé busied himself, fussing with his cape. I didn't bother to repeat my opinion of the guidebook.

Perhaps to ensure he was enjoying himself, one of the women ventured closer and danced before us. Though she wasn't bare breasted as some, her tunic was so loose it showed off more than it concealed when she moved. One of the guards barred her from coming closer with a spear and uttered something I didn't catch.

The young lady must have held some position of prestige, as she simply pushed his spear aside and continued past. Her blue and white belt, a sign of rank, became visible as she ventured closer. She was beautiful in the untamed manner I had once grown accustomed to: her almond-shaped eyes full of unbridled delight, plump lips curving into a sensuous smile, and a lack of shame for the feminine curves of her body. Meriwether's jaw hung open as the young lady swayed her hips before him, and she laughed at his unconcealed surprise. I was glad for her mane of black hair falling in front of the scant tunic, the only barrier between the captain's leering and her body.

"I am Sumiko. What is your name?" she asked Meriwether in her language.

Immediately I noticed her informality, which was not the norm and knew something was amiss. "He's called Meriwether, son of Lord Klark, the master of New Campton Manor Space Station. He is a great leader of his people." A slight exaggeration. "I am Felicity, daughter of—" I stopped midsentence upon seeing Meriwether offer her his hand. "They don't know that custom."

Sumiko imitated his gesture, sticking her hand at his chest. Her arms were tattooed with double rings that resembled bracelets. They were similar to the ones I hid under my long sleeves, only mine also included geometric designs that stretched up to my elbows. Meriwether took her hand in his and kissed it, sending her into a bout of squealing. She yanked her hand back and wiped it on her skirt before a hasty retreat. The Jomon nearest whispered about "eating flesh" and "cannibals."

Though the masks the guards wore hid most of their face, their mouths were grim lines, jaws clenching. One of the warriors grabbed Meriwether and shook him.

"I apologize on his behalf," I quickly said before they could do more. "Among gaiyojin, that is a gesture of goodwill."

Eyes watched our every movement. I had the distinct impression we were on display more than the performers.

Meriwether shook his head and looked genuinely hurt. I placed a hand on his shoulder. "Jomon don't have the same customs we do. They don't kiss. She probably thought you intended to eat her."

His face turned red. "The guidebook didn't say it would be improper to greet a lady this way."

"That guidebook wasn't meant for courtship," Charbonneau said in a disapproving huff.

"I've kissed the hands of women from the Orient on Earth. They didn't act offended." Meriwether bit his lip. "I don't know anything, do I?" He scooted closer and spoke more softly, lest he be heard. "Father should have sent someone else to lead this expedition. Someone older and more experienced, like you said."

I cleared my throat. "So you overheard our conversation? Or did he tell you?" I prayed it was the latter.

"Your voice is hardly quiet when you're angry, dear." His eyes were sad. "I didn't know about the inheritance your grandparents decided should be yours until you brought it up. Honestly, I didn't know that was why he wanted us to marry. That isn't why I asked you to marry me."

"I know," I whispered. "I didn't know about it either." Not until I had "accidentally" read Lord Klark's correspondences.

"I just thought . . . well, I was the one who found you. I was in love with you from that first moment. It was my hope someday you might . . . ."

I glanced at the captain. He was too engrossed in the dancing to pay us any mind. Charbonneau leaned closer than I liked.

Meriwether took my hand. "He was set against allowing you to come, you being more valuable than me. He has other sons, but he hasn't another potential daughter-in-law with an inheritance that could purchase an entire asteroid. But I begged. I thought if you and I spent time together alone on this expedition, you might grow to love me." A bitter smile laced his lips. "But I supposed you had your own ways of convincing him."

I wanted to tell Meriwether how I had never intended to use him; he wasn't supposed to know of my agreeing to marry him to persuade his father. But now was not the time or place to discuss such matters.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I have grown to love you in the time I've known you, but I have never desired marriage. You know why I don't wish to marry." I swallowed the lump in my throat.

He clasped my hands to his chest. "Your past has never deterred me from loving you. I don't care what people will say. I hold you in the highest affection, and I will wait patiently until the day you wish to marry me of your own free will, whether that is tomorrow or another seven years."

I hardly deserved such adoration. My heart swelled with guilt and joy and love. Had we been in private I would have flung my arms around him and kissed him.

Charbonneau cleared his throat.

Meriwether winked at me. "We will speak on this again when we are alone."

I had no idea what else to say so I squeezed his fingers instead. Meriwether was one of the few people I could tolerate on Lord Klark's space station. For a long time I had considered him like a brother. Only recently had I entertained the notion I could love again. Or I thought I could once I had my memories back.

It was nearly a full hour of singing and music before the warlord chief deigned to join the celebration. He was simply called Nipa, the name and title bestowed on a tribal emperor. He wore the animal head of the vivid green tanuki raccoon dog mask like the tribe's warriors. All I could see of his face was the square jaw and sensuous mouth, similar to the female dancer and other Jomon. His chest was bare, revealing broad shoulders and scars etched into the muscles of his belly. His belt was made of the blue and white stripes I recognized as a leader's.

The female dancer who had entranced Meriwether placed herself beside him while the elders seated themselves at the bench on the opposite side of the shrine. Her informality now made more sense. She had no need to treat us with respect when her station was so high above us.

An old woman poured Nipa and the young lady I presumed to be his wife a drink. The leader in turn poured for the elders. After they drank, I nodded to the party. "You may take refreshments now."

As soon as I raised my cup of shochu, my eyes watered. I feigned a sip out of politeness.

Meriwether choked and coughed. Charbonneau sipped his.

Captain Ford tipped his back in one gulp. "Now that's some spirits!"

The Jomon watched us eat and drink, some laughing at our reactions. Even I tried not to laugh as Charbonneau stabbed at the slippery, cooked eel with his hashi, sending it sliding around his wooden plate. When the cups were refilled, Meriwether turned green.

"Just pretend to eat and drink if you don't like it," I said.

Captain Ford drank his refill of shochu and when Charbonneau wasn't looking, he gulped down his as well.

When we finished our food, Nipa spoke in the Jomon tongue. "I wish I could welcome you to the Tanukijin precinct in peace rather than in war. Not only do your people trespass, but you attack my people. If my scouts had not found you before the storm, you would be dead. It would seem your party owes me a great boon." The corners of his mouth turned up into what I took to be a sly smile, though too much of his face remained hidden under his mask to fully read his expression.

I translated. Meriwether sat taller. "Oh? Tell him we can hardly refuse him with his men pointing spears at us, can we? Must we suffer such indignities when we have traveled all the way across the galaxy to come to this world?"

The leader crossed his arms as if displeased. Since few Jomon knew our language, he must have picked up on the superior tone.

This would not do. I bowed my head and stared at the dirt floor as I spoke in the native tongue. "We humbly apologize for the inconvenience we have caused, and wish to atone for the actions of our impulsive comrades. We can only hope to be of service to you and provide distraction and diversion during these long cold hours of the storm. If it pleases your elders to consider us allies, perhaps they would allow your warriors to rest."

Two of the elder women chortled. An old man slapped his knee and muttered something I couldn't understand. The village of witnesses murmured quietly. I wondered if I had used bad grammar or said the wrong word. I remembered how I used to confuse the word in their language for "big toe" and "sweet potato."

Meriwether's eyes narrowed. "Did you tell them?"

"Indeed."

The leaders conferred and after a moment nodded. The warriors stepped back into the shadows of the walls, though they didn't sit, nor release their weapons. I noticed how they flanked the fur-covered windows and doorways. There was no way to escape should we have need of it.

Nipa inclined his head. "You speak well, in our tongue and without the usual . . . impoliteness your people are apt to possess." His chin angled toward Captain Ford ever so slightly, as though he thought he might be one of those people. "You have lived on this world before, ne?"

I nodded.

"Your accent is easier to understand than many outsiders."

The Chiramantepjin also had preferred the sound of the United Worlds of America surveyors than those belonging to the British Empire of Planets, though I suspected my own was somewhere in between after living so many years at New Campton Manor Station among the British. The glint of his eyes under his mask shifted to Meriwether. "Tell me your business in my province and I will tell you whether I shall permit you shelter. If your answer displeases me, we will turn you out into the snow."

After I translated, Meriwether said, "Tell him we wish to make a deal with them." He retrieved a cherry-sized, red diamond from his breast pocket. The light from the fires made it sparkle and shine. "In exchange for information on where to acquire more of these stones, we will pay handsomely for your land. Tell him that."

The villagers snickered and pointed to the red stone, though it was when I came to the part about us wanting more than everyone laughed outright. I thought I heard the word for "urine" repeated and suspected they were swearing at us.

"Maybe you don't speak Jomon as well as you say," Captain Ford said.

Nipa looked as though he, too, was trying not to laugh. When I finished speaking, he shook his head. "Ah, you wish for land like the others before you. And where will my people live? You have already pushed Chiramantepjin from our original home in the northern mountains. You've brought disease and endless winter to this world."

"What did he say?" Meriwether asked.

"Pardon me, Nipa, but what do you mean? How are we to blame for winter?" I couldn't keep the shock from my voice. The diseases I knew about. We'd been examined to ensure we were free of disease this time, and I'd insisted we bring vaccines for the supposedly non-existent natives—and existent livestock—should we spread disease.

Nipa went on. "Your sky ships bring death. They tore apart the jungle to plant crops that died after one season, and they destroyed the mountains for reasons we can't comprehend. Your weapons scarred the earth and changed our seasons. Others have come before you stating that you have destroyed your original world. Must you do the same to ours?"

My heart sank. I shook my head. So much had changed since I'd been here last, only now it was clear to me why. The colonists had been terrascaping, like they had with the Oregon territories, to make it more temperate like Earth, and the prospectors had been mining for resources which surely had altered their landscape and livelihood.

Meriwether said, "Tell him we are prepared to offer him—"

"Silence! I have no patience for your bargains," Nipa said. "If you wish me to speak with you at all, you will enact the traditional form of diplomacy among the tribes of my planet. We will perform tsuma no kokan."

I raised my voice to be heard above the rising chattering in the room. "Please excuse my ignorance, Nipa. What do you mean by tsuma no kokan?" The word broke down into "wife" and "trade," or "swap," but the context wasn't clear.

"In the traditional ways of my people that we have practiced for over a thousand years, I wish to perform an act of goodwill by giving your leader my wife for a fortnight. In that time, your people will learn from her and she will teach you our ways. You must convince her of your sincerity and goodwill, and that what you offer us is of equal value to what we offer you." He gestured to Meriwether. "Tell him."

As soon as I did, Meriwether's gaze fell upon the pretty, young woman who sat beside the leader. His lips parted as if in question. She cast a shy smile at him and looked away. I might have accidentally elbowed him.

"My wife will become your wife and you will treat her with the respect and kindness a husband owes a wife. You will consummate your union in a bridal chamber and perform memory exchange as my people do to show the depth of their hearts."

The young woman looked from Nipa to Meriwether and pointed. Her words were too soft to hear over the whispers in the crowd. The leader nodded. She blushed and looked away.

After I translated, I advised Meriwether. "You know what happened to me. If you are to do this, you must proceed with caution. They could steal your memories and leave you befuddled. You won't even remember why you were here."

"Is that it? Or do you wish to keep Mr. Klark all to yourself?" Captain Ford asked. "If this is the way these primitive people do business, what right have we to interfere in their local customs and offend their simple ways?" He winked at one of the women and blew her a kiss. The gesture only confused those watching, which was mostly the entire room.

I threw up my hands in exasperation. More than ever I hated the captain, not just because he was uncommonly rude, but because he was right for once. I did wish to keep Meriwether to myself. Guilt churned inside me. What if he fell in love with a Jomon maid and realized how inferior I was?

Charbonneau stroked his wiry sideburns. "You must prove yourself to your father one of these days, lad. You might as well enjoy yourself while you're at it." He glanced at me. "No offense, Miss Earnshaw."

Meriwether couldn't tear his gaze from the young woman making flirty eyes at him. I couldn't completely blame him with the way he'd been sheltered onboard ships and British space stations, only seeing women with at least three layers of clothes. He cleared his throat and looked to me. "We are engaged. I would never do anything to injure our relationship."

The captain chuckled, looking especially chipper for his condition. "We can always say I'm leader of this party. I don't mind bedding exotic, planetside women."

I felt bad for the young woman if he claimed leadership. On the other hand, if she did wipe out his memories, there wasn't anyone else I could imagine who would benefit from a clean slate as much as he.

Meriwether rubbed his temple as he mulled over his options, thinking it over slowly as he was wont to do. Too slowly for the captain.

Captain Ford waved his hand in the air. "I will do this. In the name of diplomacy, I will bed as many primitive women as necessity dictates." He took another swig of shochu. Of my shochu. No wonder he felt so good.

"Fool," one of the guards muttered from behind us. The elderly shook their heads at him. A few nearest rolled their eyes. In their culture he behaved like a child.

I looked into the fresh, young face of the woman, trying to discern whether I saw deception. Her visage lacked the sneaky smile of Nipa beside her. She didn't look like a memory thief, not that I knew what one looked like. I tried to justify how it would be good for Meriwether to understand these people—and perhaps understand women. But in my heart I was no less jealous.

I placed a hand on Meriwether's arm. "You promised your father you would do anything for this mission's success. As did I. You are the leader. You must do this." I loathed that I had to be the one to tell him this, his own fiancé. "Don't let Captain Ford take your status as leader away from you."

Meriwether sighed. "Indeed. Tell the natives I will do it."

The leader's lips curled into a smile as soon as Meriwether spoke. He inclined his head at my blushing fiancé. "Your leader agrees, as does my wife. But what of your leader's wife? I must be given a wife in exchange."

Of all the nerve! My palms immediately began to sweat. I didn't bother to translate. "Meriwether Nipa hasn't a wife, so it looks like your wife-swap isn't possible."

"Has Meriwether-kun a woman he has spoken for?" he asked. I frowned at the title "kun," a reduction in status from emperor to simply a man. "A betrothed that he may trade while he samples mine. If no wife exists, a sister or mother will do."

There were snickers from the crowd at the word "sample."

"I will not be traded," I said, dropping all politeness and informality. "I am not one of your chiramantep heifers." The Tanukijin muttered around us. This tradition was not the way of the Chiramantepjin people that I had known. They valued women as equals and gave them a say in matters. They didn't sell people, nor arrange marriages for wives and daughters.

"Now you've done it. You've ruined everything, haven't you?" Captain Ford hiccupped. I scooted Meriwether's cup out of his reach.

The leader put up a hand and the crowd silenced. "We do not force our women, nor would it be our way to force yours. It must be your decision, not his."

Meriwether placed an arm around me. "I don't like the way he looks at you. He wants you in exchange, doesn't he?"

I blinked. "How did you know?"

Meriwether straightened. "I'm a businessman. I know how such matters work. One never gives something for nothing. Am I right? Fret not. When my father said we were to do anything in order to acquire the mines he wanted, he didn't mean this."

If there was anyone who was close to knowing what I'd been through, it was my fiancé. He understood why I wanted to come—and he knew my greatest fears. I leaned into him, appreciating his astuteness.

Sumiko worked her way through the crowd toward us. She stopped before me, extending a hand. I shook my head. "I do not consent."

She crouched before me and took my hands in hers, pleading in her eyes. "A private word with you, Felicity-san." She used the polite honorific for a woman following my name. "It will take but a moment and then you are free to join your party. Yes?"

Drumming started up. Scantily clad dancing men and women rose to their feet. Meriwether's jaw hung open as he watched a couple gyrate in dance. He was so naive it was almost endearing. He glanced up from the performers, to me and back to the entertainment.

"I'll be right back. I hope," I said.

She led me past the shrine and out of the hall. The drumming grew distant as I followed her through a drafty corridor. The only light came from the glow of a fire in one of the rooms up ahead. Sumiko beckoned me to follow her into a room. I halted in the doorway when I saw the man, his brawny arms crossed as he stared into a fire. He wore the Tanukijin mask like the others, but I recognized his confident demeanor. As I came closer I noted the striped blue and white pattern of his belt, confirming his rank as headman.

He didn't look up. "A word with you."

I hadn't even seen him slip from his throne. The dancers had served as distraction as well as entertainment.

Sumiko bowed her head and retreated to the other side of the room, busying herself with laying out their spoils of newly acquired guns, clothes and tools they had no idea how to use.

I stood, waiting. Questions burned within me but it was the Jomon custom that rank dictated who spoke first in such a meeting as this.

The firelight and our proximity afforded a better view of the leader's aspect. The muscles of his athletic physique bunched with tension. Only his lower profile was visible under the mask of the headdress. What I saw might have been considered attractive had he been smiling. Between his grim expression and the horns catching the light on his tanuki mask, he instead looked like a monster.

He turned to me. His lips parted as if he wished to speak, but no words were forthcoming. As an afterthought, I lowered my eyes and bowed.

"Have you anything to say to me?" he asked in Jomon.

I wasn't sure what he wanted to hear. I considered the events of the day. "I apologize for the impulsiveness of our party that led to the death of your warrior. I am sorry to hear of the destruction you have experienced at the hands of foreigners."

He frowned. He gave no apology for killing a dozen men from my party.

I asked, "Have you anything to say to me?"

"If it pleases you, I wish to make a deal with you," he said in my own language, though in the same formal tone used to indicate respect and diplomacy. His accent was heavy, but I understood his words. If anything, he spoke better than I did in his language.

It shouldn't have surprised me he spoke English. It made sense a leader of a planet that had become a recent hot spot of mining would have need to learn it.

I bowed my head, the customary gesture of politeness and respect, using the same formal tone. "Pardon me. As much as you honor me with your request, you have nothing to give me that is worth my virtue and honor."

"Virtue and honor?" He repeated the words as if confused. "What do these words mean?"

"Virginity." My face grew hot and I hoped he didn't see my embarrassment. "To sleep with a man for the first time. Among my people it is a kind of taboo to have an unwed woman." My voice grew hoarse and every inch of my being screamed that I was a liar. But Lord Klark had impressed upon me the necessity of not speaking of my past and the way I'd been violated. Even if I didn't care about bringing a scandal upon myself, I had to consider how it would affect Meriwether's reputation. I had no idea how a Jomon would react to my past. It had been too long since I'd been here last.

For the first time, Nipa turned to stare, his formality being exchanged for astonishment. He was young for a leader. If what I saw of the creases around his mouth and the hint of wrinkles at his eyes were accurate, I guessed in his late thirties or early forties.

In the corner, Sumiko giggled. The headman shook his head sharply. She caught herself and apologized for her rudeness. Apparently his wife also understood more English than she let on.

I tried to keep my voice neutral as formality dictated, but it grew high pitched with emotion. "The concept is foreign for you, I know, but it has great value to me. To my people, behaving so cavalierly with one's sexuality is not something women are permitted to do."

The headman retreated along the perimeter. He picked up a small metal object glinting in the firelight. Probably my pocket watch. My heart sank lower.

"Your headman says you are here for trade. I know that is not why you are here. You know our language. You know our ways. You have been to my planet before, ne? I also know you had something stolen from you that you value. I will return what you seek."

I held my breath. How did he know? Was it obvious half my soul was missing, my absent memories leaving a hole cut from my heart that only a Jomon would recognize?

I stepped closer, swallowing the lump in my throat. "How can you help me? How can you know what I seek?"

He continued farther from me, picking up another object and returning the first. At first I didn't think he saw me step closer, then it crossed my mind that he might not want to stand too close to me. I didn't remember this custom. Mayhap it was a Tanukijin formality. I couldn't believe I'd thought of myself as an expert on the planet's natives.

"I know where she is," he said.

As he glanced at me, he must have seen the bewilderment on my face.

"Your sister," he said.

A sudden cry erupted from my throat. I covered my mouth as if I could stuff the pain back inside. I swallowed the tears and calmed myself. It was a long moment before my voice worked again. "You're lying. My sister is dead."

From the fur pouch at his belt he removed a folded piece of paper. He opened it and held the paper out to me. On it was a crayon drawing of the jungle, plants and flowers depicted in vivid colors that only an artist could capture. FE was signed in the corner. Faith Earnshaw.

I shook my head. "Anyone could have drawn this. Anyone who found her crayons. And it's too advanced for her skills."

"Too advanced for the child you left, but not a young woman. This was drawn by Faith-san."

He could even say her name correctly. I wanted to believe my sister lived. Imagining her as an adult filled my heart with so much longing, I couldn't imagine refusing him. I folded the paper up and held it out to him. "If my sister is alive, you will show her to me first and then I will agree to your conditions."

He shook his head at the paper I held out to him. "She is too far. I will bring Faith-san to you after you agree and the weather is clear. You need only consent to the wife-swap. I will not take your virtue. We will only trade memories."

It was hard to say which I valued more, my virtue or my memories. I unfolded the paper and stared at the drawing again. I had come here to retrieve one lost treasure, only to be offered another.
Chapter Three

Upon arriving on an unexplored planet, it is important to look for signs of native alien life and colonists from the first era of spaceflight to make sure the planet isn't already inhabited. For details on classification, if you believe you have found a native tribe, skip to page 238.

—The Guidebook of Colonization and Interplanetary Relationships

The Jomon were one of five groups of colonists that had originated from Earth, emigrating to far away worlds during the first era of spaceflight millennia ago. As time passed, we had lost contact with these peoples and their advanced technology. Only in the last hundred years had we regained knowledge of space flight and ventured out of the solar system again, establishing space stations along abandoned hyperjump ports the first colonists had left behind.

British explorers, as well as those from the United Worlds of America, had found relics of pyramids and temples on planets and asteroids from the ancient Egyptian and Sumerian cultures. They discovered living descendants of Meso-American and African cultures on three inhabited planets.

Thirty years before the arrival of our party, the Nina and Pinta had probed the planet, found the poles teeming with oil, and commenced drilling. They had also put in word to the space stations that the mountains were rich with minerals waiting for prospectors to mine. The Santa Maria was sent by the commissioner of new interplanetary acquisitions of the United Worlds of America to determine whether the planet was habitable. My father cared far less about buying a share than my mother. It was through her persuasion that my father agreed to come to the newest discovered world, as they were interested in investing in the planet, should it be a good place to settle.

I was twelve and my sister ten when the Santa Maria landed on the unclaimed planet. Our ship carried scientists and surveyors who were to determine Planet 157's resources and potential for colonization. My mother had died two years before landing and my father, still grieving, busied himself in his work, having no time or heart to mind two daughters.

"Stay near the ship and don't go past where you can be seen," Father said, not looking up from his surveying maps outside the ship.

Every day for a month, Faith and I whined and pleaded to be allowed outside the ship. After the crew's numerous expeditions found no dangers and few animals in the jungle that could harm us, my sister and I were given more freedom to explore—so long as we stayed in earshot of the ship.

Faith and I sat in an enclosure of purple fern-like plants laced with bright yellow flowers, watching small avian creatures flutter from flower to flower. Their wings lacked feathers and they resembled the bats of Earth more than birds. The long noses that slurped up nectar from the red dots in the center blossoms made me think of the elephants in my electronic books. Faith sketched the brightly colored "nose birds," as we decided to call them, while I made lists and descriptions to accompany Faith's drawings.

Something rustled through the brush. The nose birds made excited yips and skittered off at the sudden movement. Faith and I exchanged annoyed glances, expecting it to be one of the ship's crew, probably looking for us—though no one called our names or chastised us for once.

We ducked lower into the purple leaves of our secret alcove, not wanting anyone to find our special hiding nook. A shape leapt over the ferns and into our miniature clearing, nearly tripping over us. It was a boy, clad in plants. With his bronze skin, purple leaf skirt and red dots painted over his naked arms and chest, he looked more like the flowers around us than like a human.

He stared at us dumbfound and we silently stared back. I had never seen a nearly naked boy before, and I was quite in shock. The first surveyors had said no one inhabited this world anymore; all that remained of the long-gone colonists were ruins. It took a moment to register that the boy held a pointed stick in his hand. I tugged my sister behind me. I was about to scream, but he threw his spear aside and dropped to his knees in front of us. He bowed, said something that we didn't understand, and waited. He performed the gesture again and repeated himself.

"Do you think we're supposed to do the same?" I asked.

Faith bowed and tried to repeat the gobbledygook he said. The boy fell back onto his bottom laughing so hard he nearly flipped over his skirt. I repeated the words I thought he'd said and this made him laugh even more. His laughter was infectious and soon we were all laughing. His eyes were almond-shaped and turned into crescents hugging his round cheeks when he smiled. Though his face was chubby, his frame was lean and wiry. I didn't know anything about boys, but I found him to be adorable in his aspect as well as his mannerisms.

With some trial and error, we found out his name was Taishi. He showed us how to drink nectar from the flowers and which berries were safe to eat. He gave my sister a pretty red pebble from a satchel at his belt and me a slightly smaller one.

"We need to give him something in return," I said. It wasn't that I was trained in the art of diplomacy, or that I had extensively studied the guidebook of etiquette for the original five peoples of Earth who had set out to colonize various worlds. It just seemed like the right thing to do.

I had nothing of interest in my pockets. Faith had a dried ration of nutrient bar.

She whispered, "If he takes one bite of this he'll probably think we're trying to poison him."

We tore our drawings from our sketchbooks and offered them to him instead. He took them, bowed and ran off. We were so excited, we ran off as well. Wouldn't our father be pleased! Surely this discovery was as important as any of his.

"Guess what, Poppy, guess what!" Faith said, tugging on his sleeve as he sat with the crew.

"Not now. We are discussing important matters."

"But we have to tell you the most exciting news. We met a person in the forest today," I said.

"I haven't time for your stories about imaginary friends," Father said in his coarse British accent.

Faith pouted. "It isn't like the cargo bay beast we made up. This is real."

I tugged on my sister's hand and steered her away.

When we next saw Taishi, he beckoned us to follow him deeper into the forest.

"What if we get lost?" Faith asked.

I studied the confident smile of the boy. If he had found us again, he must have known his way around the forest. "We'll be fine."

"But Poppy said we have to stay in sight of the ship," she insisted.

"As if he'll take notice," I said. No one had time to bother with children. Even the ship's robot, formerly operating under nanny mode, was now programmed for collecting specimens and analyzing data.

Taishi, growing impatient, skipped into the trees without us. I lifted the hem of my skirt and petticoats to follow, ignoring how it showed off my calves. Faith ran after us.

We skirted along the edge of the stream. Taishi pointed out the green and purple tanuki foraging along the water banks. If not for their horns, they might have been cute. The animals native to the planet were so much brighter and more interesting than the Earth animals we'd often heard about.

Taishi cupped his hands to his mouth and made a low whistle-like call. The animals lifted their heads and wagged their striped tails. They whistled in response. Faith and I tried to do what he did, but we ended up scaring them away.

He guided us to the edge of the jungle mesa where many streams from the uphill slope gathered into one as they fell from the cliffs. A herd of the furry bear-like creatures with tusks and giant teeth grazed in the meadow at the bottom of the waterfall. We had been to the ridge once before with the scientists, but they had told us not to approach the beasts since they had charged when the captain's men descended into the valley. The animals weren't able to leave the valley, and we had never tried going down. I hesitated when Taishi showed us how to descend the rocky ledge. In some places, steps were chiseled, in other places the outcropping of rocks appeared natural.

"We'll get in so much trouble," Faith said. "They told us we can't go where the big animals are."

I nudged her with an elbow. "That's why we aren't going to tell."

"But what if we get hurt?"

"We won't." My confidence must have calmed her because she followed me down.

At the bottom of the cliff, the air smelled pungent. Animal musk hung heavy in the air. Taishi rubbed his hand with red flowers until powder covered them and motioned for us to do the same. He slowed his buoyant step as he snuck up to the large fuzzballs. My heart thundered at the folly of this idea, but Taishi was so certain of himself, it was hard to imagine he didn't know what he was doing. One of them sniffed the air and stomped closer. It licked his hands and nuzzled his side. Before long they were doing the same to Faith and me. Taishi lifted Faith onto one of the animals and led her around to ride it.

Taishi pointed to the animal. "Chiramantep," he said.

After more gesturing, we decided this must be the name of the beasts. Chiramantep was better than "great, blue fuzzball," as we called them. We rode on their backs, and our new friend showed us how to make them obey us. They only listened if you tamed them with flowers and they grew accustomed to your scent. Chiramanteps weren't at all dangerous if they liked you. If they didn't, they might gore you to death and then go into a blood rage, killing anyone else with you. But I didn't know that at the time.

Over many months, he taught us the words for all the plants and animals around us. I tried to teach him our words but there were so many I didn't know how to explain. What we couldn't express in words, I drew in pictures. Faith was so much better at that. He actually could tell what she'd drawn.

Every day we ventured out together, learning more and sharing each other's language. I tried to ask Taishi, "Only you? Other family?" I hated the idea of him being all alone on this planet. There weren't supposed to be any survivors of tribes on this world.

"Yes, no," he said, not shedding any light on the matter.

If he were alone, it was only reasonable for him to return to camp and live with us. But he shook his head every time we tugged him close to the ship and he withdrew. Finally he brought more children to prove there were others like him.

The little girl he introduced us to screamed when she saw us, then ran back and touched our hair and brought her face close to stare into our eyes. Hers were black and shaped like his. Their eyes and skin tone matched what the guidebook said about the Jomon people who had left Earth long ago.

"Why are you always alone if you have friends and family? Don't they care where you are?" I asked.

"Busy. Father and mother busy."

"Our Poppy is always busy too," Faith said.

I nudged my sister with an elbow. "Say 'father.' He doesn't know the word 'poppy.'"

Taishi nodded. "Head man and woman always busy."

He must have known our father's position from watching. That night when the crew made a fire outside and ate dinner, I saw him spying on us from high in the branches of the tiaju or umbrella trees.

"Poppy, look!" Faith squealed, pointing.

My father looked up from his work. Taishi slipped into the shadows. Father scowled at me and shook his head. "It's up to you to mind your sister. You shouldn't let her imagination get away from her like this."

Two years before, when Mother was still alive, he would never have said that. He had crawled on the ground with us through the ship corridors pretending to be ship rats. He had let us blindfold him and play Marco Polo—much to the captain's annoyance. These days it wasn't just my mother I missed. It was my father as well.

Faith's eyes filled with tears. "But Poppy, I'm telling the truth."

"A good lady is quiet and meek and doesn't interrupt," Father said.

I crossed my arms. "Are you saying Mother wasn't a good lady?" It was hard to imagine her being subservient, considering she was the one who had led the mission.

Father's face darkened. He set his pen down, and a blob of ink splattered across the map he drew.

"I'm sorry, Poppy. I'll be good," Faith promised, slinking away.

I silently slipped after her and determined I wouldn't bother him with the discovery of our new friends.

Looking back on my childhood always saddened me as an adult; my world was full of regrets and ghosts of memories. With my father dead, I had no chance to make up for those years he had been grieving and we were invisible to him. Whether it was Taishi's tribe that had killed him or another, I didn't know. Those memories had been stolen. Now that I had returned to Aynu-Mosir, I intended to get my memories back, no matter the cost.
Chapter Four

In 1763, Captain Simeon Ecuyer brought smallpox infected blankets to the two planets in the Oregon territories, which he distributed to the native colonists. This resulted in an epidemic that killed ninety-three percent of the population and left the Sumerian descents vulnerable to invasion from British, French and Americans alike. Rather than face slavery, the Meso-Sumerians blew up their planets. Though there are explorers who support the F.C.F.W.P. (First Contact for First World's People Pact) among spacefaring nations, biological warfare is still thought to be used in the outskirts of the galaxy.

—Anonymous alien's rights suffragist

Sumiko led me back to the great hall. I clasped the crayon drawing to my bosom. The air of the hall was hot and stuffy. My corset felt tight and confining, more so than it had in years. My thoughts raced and I searched the villagers' faces, yearning to find one familiar amongst them.

Where was my sister? Had the Tanukijin enslaved her and punished her for what our people had done to their planet? I would do anything for my sister, but what if Nipa was lying and she was dead?

By the time I was seated beside Meriwether, I gasped for breath. I tried to calm myself and not to show my fear. The drumming died down.

Meriwether took my hand. "You're pale. Is everything all right? What did they do?"

"I'm well. It's just that I fear for my—"

There was no time to finish, as the Nipa asked, "Felicity, daughter of William Earnshaw Nipa of the star men, what do you say to our wife-swap?"

I bowed my head. "I agree to this."

"What says your leader?"

Meriwether placed my hand in the crook of his arm. "What is he saying? Where were you?"

I glanced at Meriwether, hoping he hadn't changed his mind. "He consents," I said.

I then translated. Meriwether shook his head. "No, I will not trade your virtue for a business deal." His eyes were wild, panicked in the same way they had been when the shooting had started. "My father would not want that. I should never have suggested you come." I had no idea how to console Meriwether other than to pat his arm and let him rant.

I doubted his father cared so long as I married his son and passed on my fortune to his family. He only let me come because I played my trump card; I finally agreed to marry Meriwether—if he allowed me to accompany him. But now I risked the friendship and affection of the one person I could imagine loving.

The leader's smile turned mischievous as he turned to the comely young woman beside him. "Sumiko, would you bring out my wife?"

Blast! Sumiko wasn't his wife? That clue and the laughter that followed signaled something was amiss.

"Felicity dear, you must undo this," Meriwether began, surely still fixated on my impending doom and not his own.

I waved him off with a far easier manner than I felt. "Stop fretting over my virtue. The leader simply wants my memories. He has no intention in bedding me."

He raised a finger. "Don't tell me not to fret. I know you well enough to know what an ordeal memory exchange will—"

From behind the shrine came a woman as tall as any of the warriors in spiked tanuki headdress—only she wore none. She strode forward, the laughing crowd parting. Her limbs were thick and her features . . . coarse at best. A dark blue line was tattooed over her mouth. From the gray hair and wrinkles, she must have been twice the headman's age.

She stopped before us, bowing before Meriwether. Her voice was hoarse and gruff. "Aren't you a beauty!"

Meriwether tugged on my sleeve. "What's happening?"

Old Charbonneau shook his head. Captain Ford lay on the ground laughing with the rest of them. They'd caught on, even if my fiancé hadn't.

Nipa inclined his head at the immense woman. "Allow me to introduce my wife, Tomomi-chan." From the roar of laugher around us, it was obvious we had been duped.

The woman scooped Meriwether up and flung him over her shoulder. He squealed, not unlike a baby buta. I watched in horror as she slapped him on the rump and carried him off. I leapt forward, but a guard caught me and yanked me back.

I suspected we were off to the start of a very bad business negotiation.
Chapter Five

New London Times Space Gazette

Arts and Entertainment, 1877

Whether you wish to curl up with a good novel before a holo-fire in the comfort of your space station or you are looking for a good book for star travel, consider purchasing a babbage card with one of these bestsellers hot off the press from Earth:

The Birds of the United Worlds of America by John James Audubon

The Clockwork Raven by Edgar Allen Poe

The Last of the Meso-Americans by James Fenimore Cooper

Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, a United Planet's Slave, an autobiography by Frederick Douglass

The Count of Alpha Centauri by Alexandre Dumas

Only in memories did I feel free. And even then, I didn't trust them to be true, with the way they blurred like dreams more than reality. What hadn't been stolen was a mixture of vivid sharpness and misty surrealism. Sometimes I forgot my mother's lullabies, other times I struggled to recall the sound of my father's coarse British accent as he attempted to sound refined, or American, or funny to impress my mother. Some mornings I woke to find I couldn't recall whether I had ever braided my sister's blonde hair or felt Taishi's hand in mine. Many days I couldn't see their faces.

Being on Planet 157 revived images that wavered like dreams, causing me to wonder if they were real or imagined. I closed my eyes and remembered. . . .

The cool, air conditioned interior of the ship was a welcome respite after the heat of the afternoon. I sat in the common room beside my sister, drawing my own map of the jungle we had explored, the way into the valley and the path to the village that we kept secret from the adults. My art was not as beautiful as Faith's drawings, but I suspected mine were more accurate than hers. Faith sat beside me, pressing flowers she'd found that day into her book. She tucked blonde waves of hair away from her face and continued to work.

She was by far the prettier of the two of us and looked more like our mother. How I envied her beauty.

I kept my own book angled so that it hid my sketch from Father's view. I hadn't yet labeled it, but I knew I would have to use some kind of code so the adults wouldn't discover our secrets. I was certain once they knew Faith and I had discovered something they hadn't, it would be taken away.

Under no circumstances would I allow them to take anything else from me.

Father looked up from where he sat at the table across from us. He set down his electronic steno pad. "Miss Osborn says it is time you are fit for a . . ." He cleared his throat. ". . . a corset and other garments appropriate for a young lady."

"And me?" Faith asked.

"What will she make them from? Tree bark and leaves?" I asked.

"We still have your mother's, ahem, undergarments." His face flushed red, I guessed with embarrassment more than anger at my insolent tone. This was a first.

"I am an explorer," I said. "How can I go on long treks and climb onto a—" I almost said chiramantep, but he didn't know we rode them with Taishi. "—tree if I'm wearing a corset?"

"I'll wear it! I want to look pretty like Mama," Faith said.

"Miss Osborn will speak with you on this matter. It's a subject best broached between—"

Faith tugged at his sleeve. As she did so, a red stone dropped out of her pocket. Father watched it sparkle as it caught the ship's artificial light. Though it lacked the luster it held in sunlight, even now it was incredible to gaze upon. Father stooped to retrieve it. He picked his bionic monocle out of his pocket—the one with the strange lenses and microscopic magnification. He locked the magnets into place so that it became part of his face.

"Remarkable," he said. "If I am not mistaken, this is a red diamond—the rarest of all stones. What a capital find!"

I cut my eyes to Faith. I gave her the smallest shake of my head to warn her not to say anything, lest she give our secrets away.

She didn't notice. Instead a hopeful smile crept over her lips. "Are you pleased, Poppy?"

Father put the monocle away. "Wherever did you find such a thing, girls?"

"Out in the forest," I quickly supplied, not giving Faith a chance to be a blabbermouth. "Sometimes we find pretty stones out there."

"This stone has been worn smooth by water." Father placed his fists on his meaty hips. "You two haven't been going into the stream I told you to avoid, have you?" From the smile creeping over his lips, I suspected he wasn't too angry if that was all he thought we'd done.

I hung my head in an attempt at shame. "I'm sorry, Poppy. We were exploring."

He quickly forgot our trespasses. He was too busy showing the crew his find. I hadn't seen him this happy in years. His face didn't look so haggard. The permanent creases next to his mouth when he frowned actually disappeared.

"Why, this diamond would be perfect for creating the orange rays needed for surgical procedures using lasers," the ship doctor said.

"No, no! Imagine how much a natural diamond that size would make if sold to the jeweler's market on Alpha Orion III!" said Miss Osborn. As a geologist, she would know.

Captain Monroe stroked his whiskers, practically drooling over the stone. "Place a diamond that size in the ship's laser and we could have the most powerful weapon in the galaxy."

"Imagine the terraforming and terrascaping that could be done on uninhabitable planets—ones unsuited for colonists like this one."

I didn't see what they needed terrascaping for. This planet had breathable air. It needed no changing.

"We've got to send word to the president about this."

They continued to argue amongst themselves about what should be done with it. They were so busy plotting the ways they would become rich that they forgot about making me wear a corset.

Father bade us to take him to the stream. The trickle of water running through the forest was an easy trek from the ship. Purple and green tanuki skittered away upon our approach. When no pretty stones turned up, he demanded, "Is this really where you found the stone, or did you go into the valley?"

I was good at recognizing his temper, and this had sparked it. "No, we wouldn't do that."

Faith paled and clenched her hands together. We needed to work on her poker face.

"You went down into the valley? Where those beasts are?" Father asked. "You could have gotten mauled! You know what one did to Mr. Price's arm before the captain shot the blasted thing."

A tragedy as far as I was concerned. The chiramantep could have been tamed by those who knew how. If Mr. Price hadn't startled a mother with a cub, I doubted she would have even taken note of him.

I was quick at supplying lies. "The animals were on the other side of the river."

When we took them on the longer trek into the valley and down to the stream, we were quite fortunate they actually were all herded to the other side grazing. All the adults were huffing when we reached the bottom of the valley. Miss Osborn rested against a rock, looking as though she would swoon. Mr. Price was quick to lend her his arm. Captain Monroe wrinkled up his nose at the pungent chiramantep odor.

The chattering call of a tree snail made me look up. I caught a glimpse of Taishi peeking out from behind a tree to spy on us. I was becoming better at spotting him with his camouflage of paint and leaf clothes.

Miss Osborn was the one to find the pea-sized, bright red stone near the banks of the river. Farther down, Mr. Price found another. I didn't know if this was where Taishi had found his stones or he had planted them there for our benefit. He never would tell us.

Father forgot to be cross with us. Miss Osborn neglected to fit me for a corset until another week had passed.

The corset was a trial in itself. I hated the horrid thing. I made them happy wearing it at the ship but as soon as Faith and I trekked out of sight, I threw off my dress and bade her to help me remove it.

"No, Miss Osborn says you have to wear it," she said. "It makes you a proper lady. You do want to be a proper lady, don't you? Mother was a proper lady."

It was a struggle to move my arms back behind me, let alone try to find the laces.

"Fine, if you won't help me, I'll ask Taishi."

"No! That's improper. I'll tell on you. Miss Osborn says—"

"What are you going to say? Your imaginary friend saw my undergarments?"

Faith sniffled and turned away. "I hate you."

"I hate you more." I felt lightheaded and sat down. Supposedly this wasn't even laced as much as it could be. Miss Osborn said that as I became accustomed to wearing the corset she would tie it tighter to give me an hourglass figure.

"I can hardly wait," I'd said in my most insolent tone.

Faith and I were still bickering when Taishi found us. Upon seeing him, Faith buried her face in the fuzzy purple leaves at the base of a tree. "I'm ashamed to be your sister."

Taishi unknotted the corset and loosened it enough for me to wiggle out of with his help. "Why put you in cage?" he asked.

"That's what they do with women from the stars. They cage us."

I threw it in the bushes, but Faith retrieved it and hugged it to herself.

"Give me look," Taishi said.

Faith bit her lip. "Taishi, you shouldn't gaze upon women's undergarments."

"He's just curious. His people don't have undergarments," I said.

Taishi gave my sister his best tanuki-dog eyes. She didn't argue as he took it from her. I giggled when he slipped the corset over his head and wiggled into it.

"I am star woman." He pranced around, imitating the way Miss Osborn walked. One side of Faith's mouth curved up. "I thinks my unko smell like sakura blossom and I talks like this." He scrunched up his face into her scowl and imitated her high-pitched nagging tone.

I fell over laughing.

Faith giggled. "You're wearing it upside down."

"Well, he's never seen one before," I said.

Taishi shook his head. "I seen on Osborn-san."

I smacked him on the shoulder. "You rapscallion! You saw her undressing? When?" I laughed.

Faith covered her mouth in horror.

"No mean to. I hears noise. Osborn-san eat man flesh." He made a face.

My sister was just as confused as I. "What do you mean?"

"She mate with red haired man, but strange. They eat each other's faces."

"Mr. Price?" Faith squealed.

Neither Faith nor I knew much about mating other than it caused animals to have babies. Any time we asked my father about such things he said we were too young to understand. Fortunately, the ship's computers were at my disposal and I had done research—until Father caught me.

I stood. "Do you think she's mating now?" Miss Osborn and Mr. Price were supposed to be gathering food provisions.

Taishi shrugged.

As many times as we tried to sneak up on them in the weeks that followed, we couldn't catch them. Even Faith was curious, but that was only because she didn't know any better. She couldn't even recall Mother kissing Father or the way he used to hug her—or us. Hugging and kissing were now gestures of affection that we only practiced with each other—and chiramantep when Faith could help it.

"Why you care? It no . . ." Taishi paused, searching for the word. "Interesting. Animals mate. See." He pointed to the nose birds. Faith and I watched for a whole half hour.

"Who is rapsyon?" Taishi asked.

"You mean a rapscallion? You are," I said.

"Hmmph! Faith and Felicity."

I leaned toward him and kissed his cheek. He scrambled back and rubbed his face. "You eat human meat like Osborn-san?"

It took a full hour to figure out Taishi thought we were cannibals because Jomon didn't know the custom of kissing. We used many words and pictures to explain we weren't. In the days that followed, I tried to kiss Taishi several times, no easy feat considering I now wore my corset and couldn't move the same.

The memories of my childhood faded in and out of my grasp. But they were true—at least I hoped they were.
Chapter Six

When the first prospectors came to Planet 157, the excavations were largely confined to the poles, where the richest oil and minerals were located and little life could be sustained. It is hard to believe my team of surveyors, seven adults in total, missed the greatest discovery on the planet. It is a discovery that two young girls found and I ignored. I don't know if this oversight makes me a worse prospector or a worse father.

—Entry from the journal of Mr. William Earnshaw, the Santa Maria

I sat in a stone tub of heated water. Sconces on the walls at the entrance and candles lit the onsen. Ghostly shadows of the attendants were cast on the walls of the steamy bathing chamber.

The water was so hot it stung my skin. "Are you sure it isn't going to boil me alive?" I asked.

The old woman laughed. I could barely see her or the other attendants at the counter with all the steam. I eased my way completely in as fast as I could, which was about as fast as a tree snail.

Nipa's trick with the wife-swap nagged at my conscience. The part of me that had lived on this planet for five years understood the cultural values of cleverness and wanted to laugh. Another part of me was too worried about the deceit behind this trick. The Jomon could not be trusted. If I was not careful, I might end up betrayed like my fiancé, or worse yet, like my father.

"Whew, she is a smelly gaijin," one of the female attendants said under her breath, using the derogatory name for outsiders and aliens.

"Shh! She can hear you."

I had forgotten how offensive the fragrances of our soaps were. I glanced over my shoulder at the woman cleaning my clothes in a wooden tub. Another ground herbs in a mortar with a pestle.

They were old enough to remember the Chiramantepjin tribe. I ventured, "I once had friends among the Chiramantepjin. Were there any survivors? Are any here amongst you?"

One of the old women snorted. Another said, "We are all Tanukijin now."

"There was a warrior who brought us here. Was he once of the Chiramantepjin tribe? He said he knew me."

"Horiuchi-san? He mentioned meeting you once before. Years ago, ne?"

I watched their indifferent expressions. "Does he know any Chiramantepjin? Does he know my sister? Do you know her?"

"So many questions from this one? She chatters like a tree snail." They cackled at that.

Two of the women stripped and joined me in the pool to scrub me down with cloths. Not wanting to insult these women, I tried my best not to cringe from their touch, but I was unused to such attentions. Gaiyojin didn't see this much of me, nor did the maids in the Klark household ever bathe me. The Tanukijin women didn't blatantly stare at the black tattoos on my forearms but they snuck glances. They were very similar to their own, though an oddity for a United Worlds citizen. I was relieved that these women were too polite to ask me how I came by them. I wouldn't be able to answer if they asked.

One woman smoothed a rag over my thigh and between my legs. I grabbed her hand.

"You must be clean for your husband," the maid said.

I had no intention of performing any wifely duties, but there was no point in correcting her on that note. "I can clean myself," I insisted. "You may leave."

The three women squabbled amongst themselves over the prudence of leaving me, but after a time slipped out. I soaked in the tub alone with the silence of the room and the rambling of my thoughts far longer than I thought they would permit me. I dried and dressed in the woven attush style robe they'd left. It was dyed with blue geometric patterns of interwoven lines and spirals—not so different from the tattoos on my arms. On the counter next to the robe was an oil smelling of green herbs and summer that I supposed was for me. I rubbed it over my arms and legs. With nothing else to do, I sat. Waiting in the swirls of warm vapor, I hoped to delay the inevitable for as long as possible. When Sumiko poked her head through the flaps of animal-hide noren style screen that covered the doorway, I knew I couldn't delay longer.

"If it pleases you, come with me. Your husband waits."

I followed her through twisting hallways and up a flight of stairs. My heart raced with anxiety as soon as I saw Nipa kneeling on the floor behind a low, wood table. Closer to the fire was a bed of animal skins. Along the wall were shelves. He wore the same style of woven attush that I wore. The V neck caused by the overlapping folds revealed a hint of muscular chest that was somehow more formidable than when his chest had been completely bared under animal skins. His purple tanuki headdress concealed his face as before. I kneeled behind the table across from him and allowed him to serve me tea. When he finished pouring, I poured his as custom dictated. The loose sleeve of my robe slipped back, exposing the tattoos I usually kept hidden.

He touched a finger to my wrist where the black lines began. "You are well acquainted with our customs, ne?" He spoke English. "I can see why your people would wish you to return to serve as translator and guide."

As casually as I could, I shifted my arm out of his reach and lifted my cup of tea. "It was never their desire for me to return. I came of my own accord despite my guardian's protests."

"Ah, but you came anyway. Is such willfulness typical of gaiyojin females? Your women are known for being . . . . What is the word? Submissive." A smile tugged at his lips and I had a feeling he was making a joke at my expense.

I crossed my arms. "You will be disappointed to find you've won a headstrong bride who will not be likely to do your bidding."

He shook his head, his steady smile filled with warmth. "You are so spicy with your words."

I sipped my tea tentatively, noting the familiar floral flavor. I bowed my head. "I beg you will pardon my ignorance, but what kind of tea are we drinking?"

"You need not speak so formally now that we are alone." He nodded to the teapot. "We call it night tea. It's a mixture of sakura blossoms, sweet tree bark and satsumaimo. The old grandmothers prepared it, hoping it would calm you."

I couldn't remember if "satsumaimo" meant big toe or sweet potato. I was hoping it was the latter. The sweet tree bark induced drowsiness. I set my cup down, wanting my wits to be about me.

He switched to his own language. "You are uncommonly quiet. You may speak freely now that we are alone."

"What have you done with Meriwether Nipa? You claim to have rules against men ravaging women, but you never assured me women do not force men."

He sat back and laughed. "Come, that was a harmless joke. No violence will come to your headman. You know our customs and speak in our tongue well enough to be aware humor and playful tricks are part of our culture."

"And you speak enough English to know you have been uncommonly rude in the eyes of my culture."

He sat forward, turning serious. "After the deaths your people brought to my province, the newest being today, the Tanukijin needed relief from their anger. Had I not shown your headman was meant to be laughed at, my people might have demanded further bloodshed from your party."

There was a Jomon logic to this that I could see, but I still wasn't satisfied. "You have lost one man and we lost a dozen. Yet you say your people need more bloodshed? Do you not think the ordeal we have been through is enough? We have seen people we know die, we have been tied up, poked with spears, been afraid for our lives, coerced into marriage, and laughed at." My voice rose and I checked my anger before I embarrassed myself. "How do I know you won't resort to deceiving me if it entertains you? How do I know you haven't already? You've already manipulated me into agreeing to your wife-swap with the offer of seeing my sister. Is there even such a thing as a tsuma no kokan or is that a trick as well?"

He fidgeted with his blue robe. I'd made him uncomfortable, either by the directness of my confrontation or discomfort over the content of those accusations. When he spoke, he confirmed the latter. "It was dishonorable to entice you to agree by offering your sister as a barter. I had instead hoped that you would agree on your own and I would surprise you by telling you of your sister. I do not regret the joke on Meriwether Nipa. I told you of its usefulness." He licked his lips. Plump lips that could have been young, but the creases around his mouth betrayed his age. He switched back to English. "I regret the dishonesty in how I convinced you. I have made you distrust me. Now you are afraid I have lied and I will go back on my word and injure your virtue. Is that correct?"

I glanced at the bed of furs waiting and nodded. That, and the deal to see my sister, and the notion he could steal my memories like the last man had. Oh, and I might as well include my life in there as well.

"I have told you that isn't the way of my people. In your time on this world, did you ever witness this kind of violence or a coercion of virtue? Or do you confuse the ways of Jomonjin with gaijin?" He used the derogatory word for alien, not the polite one he'd used earlier.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "I did not see—" It was hard not to glance at the bed. "The last time I was here in your province something happened to me when I was among the Chiramantepjin. My trust has been broken and I do not believe it can be repaired so easily."

"I don't understand." He waited for me to supply an answer. The crackle of the fire sounded too loud in the small room. I tried to make my mouth work, but no words were forthcoming. Lord Klark had drilled into me the shame it would bring me if I spoke of my past. Even now among the Tanukijin, whose ways differed from the British Empire of Worlds, I didn't know if I could trust him not to judge me.

"I have given you my word that all I will do is exchange memories with you." He slid an ornate box out from under the table and placed it between us.

I flinched back. "I don't want to exchange memories. I'm not ready. I—I can't do this." I inhaled deeply, trying to find a way to explain that wouldn't shame me. "Someone did something to me. I don't remember exactly. I didn't see it. Or I did, but now I can't."

He tilted his head. His silence was harder to endure than if he had argued with me.

"I do not wish to say more," I said. "It is too personal and I'm reluctant to confide in someone I don't know well."

I stiffened when he slid the lid to the box aside. It no longer surprised me for my requests to be ignored; I'd endured as much while living on the space station and traveling by starship. Meriwether was one of the few who listened to me.

Instead of taking out memory moss, Nipa scooped up a metal object. He cradled the pocket watch and chain in his hand. "I can see I've alarmed you in something I've said. There are many things I don't understand, including all you've been through, but perhaps I can make a small gesture to bring you comfort, no? I was told you were carrying this and were reluctant to part with it. If there is anything else you wish returned to you, please don't hesitate to ask."

He carefully placed it in my palm. I immediately felt better having the watch in my possession again. He covered my hands with his, sandwiching the ticking clock between us. His touch was warm and comforting.

He bowed his head. "I apologize for my presumptuousness. After all you've told me, I suspect a man in this chamber would be less welcome than I realized. I will send for my sister to sleep by your side tonight and in the nights that follow. She will be your guardian and guide. It is my hope that tomorrow you and I will be able to make a fresh start."

I bowed, feeling better already. Whether it was the strength of my father's watch or the kindness of Nipa's words, I felt reassured that tomorrow might be a better day.
Chapter Seven

Upon being introduced to the Chiramantepjin peoples, I had no doubt they were descended from the Jomon peoples of Earth. Though many of their customs are alien to us, I am beginning to see after two years of acquaintance how their religious rites could have evolved, their language altered from what is currently the Japanese of Hokkaido, and how the climate and geography could render their principles much more immodest than what the modern man is accustomed to when dealing with those from the Orient. I can only hope to spare my children from becoming too familiar with their indecent dress and ways so that they do not see such customs as the norm.

—Entry from the journal of Mr. William Earnshaw, the Santa Maria

With crystal clarity, I remembered my first memory swap. I couldn't always see Taishi's face, but I could hear his voice, cracking with adolescence and slowing to pronounce each word in English.

The memory moss had been growing over a section of fallen logs in the jungle Taishi and I had passed on our way to the creek. We swam in the water, splashing and playing. He wore nothing, whereas I kept my chemise in place lest we be seen. Had my prim and proper little sister been present, she might have swooned at the sight of either of us. As it was, I kept my eyes averted—mostly.

When we returned to the logs, we sat on the cushions of moss on the forest floor. The sultry air already felt more tolerable as the water evaporated from my skin. My chemise clung to my frame, providing less protection from eyes than I would have liked.

Taishi rubbed his fingers through the frills of fronds. I sat across from him, not entirely sure I had understood what he'd meant by the memory swap until he smoothed bits of green over my pale arms and I felt my first impression. I wasn't very good at quieting my mind, and it took several more trials before I understood what I was to do.

"It will be easier to receive memories if you remove your dress," he said.

"Oh? Would it? That sounds like something a rake would say."

"It's so I can rub the moss on your back." His English was almost perfect by that point since we'd been teaching each other for over four years.

I glanced around the forest, afraid my sister might find us, or any of the Jomon who would mention to my father what we were doing. Our view was partially obscured by the large fallen logs and thicket of tangled branches. I slumped lower, not wanting to be spotted.

"I will keep your clothes next to you in case someone comes," he said.

I turned away as I undressed. When I glanced over my shoulder, Taishi stared upward at the nose birds, not even looking at me.

"I'm naked," I said.

"Am I allowed to look?" he asked.

"Maybe." I giggled because it seemed like a silly question. He walked around naked every day, save his skirt—and sometimes he didn't even wear that. Nudity meant nothing to the Jomon, who were too practical to make themselves modest in the constant muggy heat. It surprised me he bothered to hide his eyes and not look for my sake when he saw every person in his village nude at some time or another.

"I'm sorry it's so hard for you to try this. I think this must be like what kissing was for me." He planted a quick peck on my cheek. His smile was patient and far more understanding than I suspected I had been with him.

I crossed my arms over my chest as I turned toward him. I drew up my knees to afford more covering. Taishi took my hands in his and gently moved them to my sides. I stared at the purple ferns growing beyond the log.

"Your skin is as fair as the moons." Admiration laced his tone.

I was sure my face was red as sakura fruit.

The bushes rustled. I swallowed and glanced around again. Nose birds yipped around each other, pushing through the leaves and darting about.

"It's just us. Have no worries."

He eased my shoulder back into the cushion of moss. My heartbeat thrummed against my rib cage. He planted a kiss on my lips. It had taken three years to get him to stop wiping off my kisses. Now he was the one kissing me. If he was willing to try my gaiyojin ways, it was only fair for me to try his customs as well.

His voice grew husky as he gazed down at me. "I have never seen you naked before. You are very pretty for my eyes."

I giggled, uncertain whether I was flattered or embarrassed. "I thought you told Faith and me that you spied on us bathing lots of times."

His lips curled upward in a mischievous grin. "I only said that because I knew it would make you angry and you would stomp around and use the funny words again."

"Swearing?"

"Yes, that's right."

He picked up the end of my wet braid and brushed it against my cheek. "I'd always wondered what color you were everywhere under your clothes. But I wouldn't spy on you." He tickled my hair down my neck and across my breasts. I slapped his hand away. It wasn't that he hadn't done this before, but I'd had my dress on then. It was easier to pretend we weren't doing anything scandalous if we both wore garments of some sort. This was another matter entirely. I hadn't felt such dangerous wanting before.

I shivered when we kissed again. Where my back and legs touched the moss, it felt as though tiny electric currents traveled into my body. My body buzzed and lightheadedness washed over me—only without the dizziness that usually accompanied it.

"Turn over and I will rub your back with memory moss. I will give you a memory and then you will give me a memory, yes?"

I adjusted myself in the bed of green. The moss smelled of citrus and mint and lavender all rolled into one. He plucked up a handful from the tree trunk and rubbed it against my skin. Immediately, warm drowsiness stole over me. This was far more intense than when he'd rubbed it on my arms. I sank into darkness, and when I surfaced, I was watching Taishi's memory. The sunlight filtering through the trees was shimmering and extra bright. I saw myself wearing my pale green dress. He held my fair hand in his dark one, reveling in the way the blonde girl absently rubbed a thumb over his knuckles. It was strange seeing myself and not being in my body. The transition from me to she and he to me became more natural as the seconds passed.

My eyes now saw what he saw. I felt his admiration for the golden hair that reminded me of dark sunshine and eyes as blue as chiramantep fur. The novelty of copper freckles, on what I imagined to be the most perfect nose, made her even more exotic. Her eyelids were so strange, but beautiful. It was hard not to stare.

Her lips parted, asking why she should bother with me if I was to wipe off all her kisses and complain when she hugged me too tightly. She didn't look at me as she spoke. She fidgeted with the white lace on her puffy sleeves. I hated the way I'd hurt her feelings. I squeezed her hand, wishing more than ever she would kiss me again and I could show her. I wouldn't be afraid this time. I would squeeze her as tightly as she squeezed me.

I waited for her to help me—she was so good at words—but she said nothing. I knew she wished me to speak, but I didn't know what to say. She rose and shrugged off my hand. "I shouldn't tarry. I'm going back to the ship."

She stepped away. Why did it have to be so hard for me to speak? She obviously liked me. I couldn't let her go without telling her how I felt this time. I chased after her and spun her to me. I planted a quick kiss on her cheek. She scowled. It must not have been enough to change her mind. I pushed down the demon of fear gnawing at my insides, telling me that if I went further I might mess it all up. I would kiss wrong and she would laugh. We would never go back to being the friends we had been before.

I pressed my lips to hers. She closed her eyes, and since she always had a better understanding of this than I did, I followed suit. The tension in her muscles melted as I hugged her to me and I kissed her again. Desire built up in my manhood, the throbbing between my legs too urgent to ignore. I pressed her against a tree, covering her face and neck and shoulders with these kisses she wanted so much from me. Her fingers wove through my hair. She moaned against me, sending fire to my loins. I wanted her the way the animals wanted each other, something I doubted she understood, even with watching animals. Nor had we spoken of this or union, and she hadn't yet spoken formally to my mother.

The wanting was torture. I waited until I couldn't stand it any longer, then ran off into the bushes and hid in the trees to alleviate my aching need on my own. It was only a few seconds before my pleasure burst forth and I was left panting and alone.

She called my name in the distance. I was so ashamed. How could I tell her? She stomped around using her funny, angry words. Would she kiss me again? Just the thought of her lips on mine sent a new surge of warmth to my limbs. My manhood throbbed with new wanting.

I ran back and kissed her more.

The memory faded into blackness. I slowly slipped back into my own body and my own consciousness. The ecstasy of release still pulsed in a phantom member between my legs and made me pant.

Everywhere my body touched the moss tingled with pleasure. The side of my face and neck, a path across my chest and belly and legs. My flesh prickled with the sensation of warmth and desire. My breasts felt hot, yet my nipples hardened as though I was cold. If I had been myself, I might have been embarrassed. As it was, I was too relaxed to feel my usual shame.

Taishi turned me toward him. His face was flushed. "Did you see it? Tell me."

"I was you. I saw what you saw and thought what you thought about me." I kissed him and wrapped my arms around his neck. He stroked me with hands that tingled of the moss. Every caress brought new waves of mounting pleasure. When his fingertips touched the spot between my legs, I gasped at the unexpected magnitude of sensation. I moaned as the throbbing peaked and then dissipated. I sighed into his chest and clung tightly to him.

"Now you will give me one of your memories?" he asked. "Something small that you can part with."

We exchanged many memories in the weeks that followed. Sometimes in the grove, and sometimes with moss that had been ground up and rehydrated with oils. He said it wasn't mating, but it certainly felt intimate. And I had no doubt if my father hadn't been too busy studying the Jomon to notice, he would not have approved.

Even so, I enjoyed these secret moments when Taishi and I shared ourselves with each other. Not only did I understand him better, but I understood his people and their customs in ways I hadn't before. Knowing me this way, he became part of me and I became part of him. There was no one in the world I trusted more.
Chapter Eight

The Jomon people, who left Earth to settle colonies in the galaxy, are thought to have evolved much like the Jomon culture on Earth in Korea, Japan, and arctic areas of North America. Because of the diversity on Earth alone, and because of the way the Jomon changed and adapted to various climates and socialized with already existing peoples, it is difficult to say if Jomon colonists on a planet may practice "wife-swap" and "kunik" (nose kissing) as Eskimos do. We have yet to establish if there will be raw fish eating, xenophobia, and enforced isolation as we see in the modern Meiji era of Japan. We surmise there will be formal and ritualized behavior such as bowing, removing shoes upon entering buildings and "saving face."

—The Guidebook of Colonization and Interplanetary Etiquette

I woke to the sound of giggles. Sumiko was gone. Three children poked their heads under the curtain of hide hanging from the doorway. When I lifted my head to look at them, they squealed and disappeared. I had the sense I had slept for a long time or at least that I'd slept well. The room glowed with the light of the fire, but I suspected Sumiko or someone else had been in to stoke it. Cracks of light showed under the flap of hide serving as curtain in the window.

I nibbled at the cold vegetable cakes left on the low table. I wasn't sure what else to do. As a teenager, I had been free to roam where I pleased in the Chiramantepjin village, but this wasn't the Chiramantepjin, nor had I been a prisoner. For a while I studied the tapestries on the wall, weavings made of grasses and plants. Animal masks hung above the hearth.

I untied the flaps of animal skin noren that sealed up the window, letting in bright daylight. Powdery snow drifted downward. I stuck my hand outside to catch the snowflakes.

To the right of my room, the side of a gray turret jutted out from the wall. The chambers and buildings below my window resembled a mess of hatboxes stacked on top of each other. A surprisingly small amount of white powder dusted the ledges and rooftops compared to the distant piles along the banks of the icy river and the snow-covered cliffs rising beyond that. When I looked up I understood why so little snow touched the palace; a large rock overhang sheltered the buildings from the elements.

How had the Jomon adapted so quickly to the climate change? I could only speculate those who lived in the colder mountains of the north must have migrated south, while the local tribes had perished. In this time of change, my sister had somehow survived. I wondered if the weather was clear enough to travel to where she resided. Now that I knew she was alive, I missed her more than ever. I hated to think about all the times I had slipped off with Taishi to get away from her.

Did she feel betrayed that I had left her? Did she understand I would never have abandoned her? When I thought of Faith, my heart filled with inexplicable foreboding. I knew I wanted to see her, but part of me felt such anxiety it was difficult to understand what I was feeling.

When I grew too cold, I tied the furs back into place. I peeled the heavy furs from the door. There were no guards.

I ventured down the drafty corridor, pausing at a room of women combing plant fibers and weaving them into fabric. A few men sat in this room as well. A group of children ran over and greeted me by bowing. The women in the room stopped what they were doing and bowed. As custom dictated, I did the same. Sumiko looked up from where she tended the fire. "Ah, you are awake. Let me fetch my brother. He will wish to take lunch with you." She left me there.

The Tanukijin in the room stayed busy in their work, but they glanced at me out of the corners of their eyes. Only the children stared openly. I once had preferred this custom of not staring to what Westerners did on the space station. Now I found it unnerving in the way they pretended I wasn't different when everyone knew I was.

I introduced myself and then asked if anyone there had once been part of the Chiramantepjin tribe. The two nearest women exchanged bemused glances.

"Have you ever met my sister, Faith?" I said her name the way the Chiramantepjin had once mispronounced it. "Heisu-san?"

An old man pursed his lips and said something too low and too fast for me to understand. No one answered. I was certain I had said something wrong, but I couldn't understand what. I tried again. "Does Heisu-san live near your village?"

People diverted their eyes. The silence was unbearable.

When Sumiko at last returned, she bade me to return to the onsen with her to clean myself for the day. I halted at the entrance of the room. The windows were uncovered, letting in light. Many women and children sat in the large pool of hot spring water. I averted my eyes at the cavalier display of nudity. In daylight I could see the green tapestries on the walls. Upon closer examination—it was one of the few places it was safe to gaze—I saw the wall was covered in moss.

I edged closer to the door. "I still feel clean after my bath yesterday. Pardon me if I pass this time."

Her eyebrows furrowed. "But you need to be clean for your husband. What if he wants you again?"

"Ugh—that's not going to happen." I backed up toward the exit, bumping into a mother undressing her child.

"Sumimasen," I said, excusing myself with words as well as a bow.

Sumiko took me back to my room and showed me how to dress in soft fur skirts, a woven tunic, and a loose poncho-like jacket made from green and purple pelts. The airy design was more comfortable than the fitted clothes of home, and felt nice in the warm air. She showed me how to clean my teeth with a fragrant chewing stick. Unsure where to fasten my father's pocket watch, I hooked it onto my tunic and wore it inside so that the chain hung between my breasts. The metal of the watch bobbed against my belly as I moved.

"Come. Your husband waits."

His room wasn't far from mine. It was furnished with similar tapestries dyed with geometric designs. On one wall a mural of the jungle was painted with bright colors that reminded me of my sister's drawings. It made me think of happier times seeing the way the planet once was.

He bowed upon seeing me and I bowed back. He wore his purple and green furs and raccoon dog mask again. The horns were even more menacing in daylight. In the light of the open window, I could see his eyes under the mask more clearly. They were as black as ink and full of warmth I hadn't noticed before. I wondered what he looked like under the fur and horns covering his head.

He poured my tea with elegant, graceful movements of his hands that were like a dance. I did my best to imitate his gestures when I served his.

I dipped my head and looked at the table to show respect and formality. "Excuse my inquisitiveness, but where is the rest of my party? How are they being treated? As prisoners or guests?"

"Stop that. I am not your elder. I am your husband and equal." He tipped my chin up to make me meet his eyes. His English sounded well-practiced. "Your friends are being treated with hospitality. If it pleases you, we will visit them when we finish our meal."

I nodded. "And we will see my sister too?"

"You must be patient. She is to be informed of your arrival and sent for. We will speak of her again in a couple days."

"Oh." I was disappointed I couldn't see her that day.

We shared food from plates set on the table. The winter food was different from what I had experienced in the warm years before the climate change. The stringy vegetables, starchy roots and salted meats were not as much to my liking, but I made no complaint. Nipa spread a red spicy paste onto a slice of boiled root and held it up to my lips.

"It improves the taste, yes?" he asked in my language.

I chewed and did my best to swallow the sour concoction. I nodded, but the expression on my face surely revealed my opinion.

He chuckled. "I don't think so either, but I keep trying to like it."

I giggled too now.

He had a hearty laugh, and it made him likable if his humor wasn't at my expense. He took my hand. "I have been thinking upon what you told me last night. The purpose of wife-swap can be for many different reasons. Learning another tribe's ways, a way to gauge sincerity or friendship, and sometimes . . ." His eyes twinkled. ". . . simply for enjoyment."

I must have made a face, because his grin grew broader.

"Memories are exchanged to serve these different purposes in a wife-swap. I do not understand your reaction last night, but I can see the idea of memory exchange makes you uncomfortable. What alternatives can you offer me instead? How do your people see into each other's hearts?"

I was so surprised that he was willing to compromise that I hadn't any alternatives. "I don't know. We give each other our word."

He scratched his beardless chin, his smile sly. "Do you believe everyone who gives you their word?"

I couldn't help smiling. "No, of course not."

"Then what else?"

"We spend time with each other. We get to know each other through friendship."

His face lit up and he nodded. "This will work. I will keep you with me so that we might spend time together and know each other better. No?"

"Is this another trick?" It seemed far too easy to persuade him. If I didn't know better I would have guessed this was what he wanted me to say.

"Not at all." He took my hand. "Are you finished? Shall we see your 'not-husband,' as my people would call him?"

I pressed my hand against the furs over my pocket watch. The ticking pressed against my belly with steady rhythm. Nipa was not unkind, as I had first thought. It surprised me he should be so accommodating and permit me to refuse his customs. In all my time at the space station, it was rare to be given a say in my own life. For years I had felt as though I had nowhere else in the galaxy to go. I had been so indebted to Lord Klark that I had permitted him to choose my books and gowns, what events I would attend, and decide all the minutiae of my life. Even after I found out about my inheritance, I knew it wouldn't be mine to claim until I married Meriwether and he managed it for me. Marriage would be a loss of freedom, though with Meriwether it might afford more sovereignty than I had ever been permitted under his father's care. Yet when I thought of being that close to any man, I didn't think I could manage it. Even the idea of a temporary marriage, this tsuma no kokan in the name of cultural ambassadorship, was intolerable.

Nipa scooted closer. "Felicity-san, are you well?"

I swallowed. "You have chosen to enact tsuma no kokan but I have told you I do not wish to compromise my virtue, and you have agreed you won't expect that of me. Last night I told you I do not wish to perform memory exchange, and you have compromised once again and claim you will be satisfied to be friends instead. Will you truly permit me to refuse both your marriage customs?"

"If that is your desire."

I sighed in relief.

"The time you were here before on Aynu-Mosir, do you remember experiencing memory exchange? Did our custom disgust you?"

It wasn't an unreasonable question. Even so, my mouth went dry and I tried to swallow, but found I couldn't. How could I expect him to understand when no one on the space station would?

Nipa lifted the teapot to refill my cup, but the pot was empty. He slid his own cup over. I gratefully drank. He held his hand open toward me. I stared for a long moment before realizing he meant me to take it. I placed my palm on this ungloved hand and he held it. The gentle pressure of his fingers infused mine with warmth and reassured me he might not shun me if I told the truth.

His eyes searched mine. "Was memory exchange unpleasant for you?"

I nodded. My eyes stung with tears, but I wouldn't let myself cry. "It is more than that. I believe a man forced himself on me. If the doctor is to be believed, he violated my, um, my female parts with a knife. I was dying of an infection when they found me." As if the pain hadn't been proof enough, the stitches had convinced me.

He sat back as if he'd been slapped.

"Being violated was traumatic enough, but then he stole my memories, so I will never be able to identify him for certain. He might have stolen weeks or even months of memories." I didn't think it was possible for someone to force me to perform memory exchange, and Taishi would have been the only one I would do so with voluntarily. "I don't know. I think, well, I think it was a man I trusted, someone I loved who did this to me. He was the only one I would perform memory exchange with."

He sucked in a breath.

Why had I not kept my mouth closed as Lord Klark always advised? Was it my familiarity with the Jomon people of this planet that made me so free of tongue, or out of necessity that I'd told him? I was mortified at my lack of prudence. I cleared my throat. "I thought if I came back . . . maybe there's a way to retrieve my memories. One of the elders might tell me how. But your warrior, Horiuchi-san, said the Chiramantepjin are all dead."

His lips parted but no words came out. He shook his head.

"You don't believe me?"

"I believe your words. I'm sorry. This is a horrible thing." He rose and came to my side. I didn't think I could meet his eyes after my admission, especially after my previous insistence of being a virgin. My cheeks flushed with shame. He squeezed my hands. "Much has happened to you. You are a brave woman. When you agreed to the wife-swap, were you not afraid I would steal your memories too?"

I swallowed. "Yes. But I had no choice. Not if I wanted to see my sister." The tension in my muscles released and I exhaled, certain I'd let go of seven years of bottled up emotion. I rarely shared so much of my thoughts. It was more cathartic than I'd imagined.

A small smile curled to his lips. "Ah, an honest gaijin. How unusual. And I have become the dishonest Joman. I can see I've done everything wrong again."

I shook my head. If anything, he was the first person who'd done something right.

When he placed his hands on my shoulders, my spine instantly went rigid. He pulled me into his embrace. "I am not touching you as a man touches a woman. I console you as a friend. I give you my word, I will keep my interactions with you chaste and brotherly." He held my head to his chest so that I heard the steady rhythm of his heart. The scent of the baths lingered on his skin. He smoothed his hands across my hair and over my shoulders. If I hadn't been so on guard I might have found it comforting. It had been a long time since I'd been held this way. Even Meriwether, who I knew loved me, didn't touch me more than propriety permitted.

Nipa's deep voice grew hoarse with emotion. "I cannot give you your memories back. But I will help you find your answers, Felicity of the stars."

Meriwether sat in the great hall. Even with the windows uncovered, letting in light and fresh air, the entire room smelled of fish and fire smoke. Woven tapestries with beautiful patterns hung on the walls. By the looks of it, old ladies showed Meriwether how to weave plant fibers. He stood when he saw me. I dodged through groups of women toward him. He embraced me and covered my face with kisses. The gesture was so unexpectedly forward, a squeak of noise escaped my lips. It wasn't that I disliked affection—I had even tried to get him to kiss me on more than one occasion, but he was far more concerned with propriety than I was.

Purple circled his eyes, giving him the appearance of a raccoon dog much like the Tanukijin masks. A moment passed before he noticed what I wore. "My god, what the devil did they do to you? Where are your clothes?" He eyed my naked forearms.

Surrounded by so many women who wore tattoos such as mine, I had forgotten about the patterns of black. His eyes widened at the sight of my exposed ankles and he looked away. He had seen more than my tattoos and ankles when he'd first met me, but that had been years ago.

"I suppose my dress was dirty." I pulled away and hid my arms behind my back, shame striking me like lightning. After that subsided, a flare of temper rose up in me. Why need I feel shame for being comfortable? For a few hours I had forgotten to feel like a pariah, and now I was a foreigner among my own people again.

"Iya!" Nipa exclaimed, seeing us and switching back to Jomon to tell Meriwether he wasn't my husband and he could embrace me in two more weeks when I was his again. I translated.

Nipa was very good at sounding gruff and looking angry, but when Meriwether's back was turned, he grinned at me and winked.

Meriwether touched a hand to his forehead as though he had a headache coming on. "My sweet darling, please tell me that man hasn't touched you. I couldn't sleep a wink thinking of the horrors he must be inflicting upon you."

I patted Meriwether's arm. "I'm fine. No one touched me. Sumiko slept in my bed. I was more worried about you than myself."

"Indeed, it was dreadful. That ugly old woman carried me off to have her way with me. But she implied I smelled and stripped me down and scrubbed me. Can you believe it?

"She then dragged me into a bed. I tried to scramble away, but she pulled me back in. When she let go, I crawled away. After she plopped me in the bed again, I scrambled out. We must have done this a hundred times. Finally when she caught me and embraced me, she made a face again and held her nose. It was both horrifying and demoralizing. The only thing that kept me from fainting was knowing I had to be strong for you."

I patted his arm. "I'm sorry, that must have been hard for you. You do understand they were playing a joke on us, right?"

Nipa shook with silent laughter behind Meriwether. He translated what my fiancé had said to two elderly ladies, making them cackle. I didn't approve of them making fun of Meriwether.

My fiancé went on. "I didn't know the headman would have two wives. Miss Sumiko came to me today and told me she would help hide me from my wife. At least I think that's what she said. She only knows a few words in our language."

I shook my head. "Two wives? I think you misunderstood. Neither are his wives."

"I'm fairly certain Miss Sumiko is his second wife." He blushed when he said it.

Nipa raised an eyebrow, muttering in Jomon, "I bet he hopes she will hide him in her bed tonight, ne?"

A toothless old lady clapped Meriwether on the back. "Chinny, chin-chin man kawaii desu ne?" Her accent was so thick I had difficulty understanding her.

Meriwether smiled at the old woman and patted her weathered hand. "Yes, I will tell more stories again later."

I doubted he'd had much success communicating, as he had no idea what she'd said and I doubted she understood much of him either. I gathered she'd found him endearing from what she'd said, though half of her words made little sense. I suspected she spoke the Isepojin dialect—a tribe that had resided in the south.

Meriwether recounted his visits to Captain Ford and Charbonneau. Apparently the old star dog had thought he was going to bed with a naked woman and woke in bed with a dozing tanuki in the morning. Children had played a number of small tricks on Charbonneau, the most memorable a serving of live tree snails which he actually tried to eat. The captain was now resting after drinking a sleep concoction that took away pain. Charbonneau attended him.

"Meli-weza!" a booming voice called from the doorway.

Meriwether's eyes widened. "Oh no, she's back. And I haven't finished weaving our wedding blanket. She said this is all I get to wear tonight to bed. I've got to get back to work."

I looked to Nipa, speaking in Jomon. "I've got to tell him."

"No, let's see how long it takes him to figure it out on his own. He's so naive, he is great entertainment. He keeps spirits higher than I can in winter."

I wondered what would happen if I disobeyed and explained to Meriwether that they were jesting with him. Would it be a cultural taboo to ruin someone's joke? It had been so long since I'd been here last, and what I did remember, I wasn't certain I trusted. I resolved to explain the entirety of what I'd been told thus far as soon as we were alone.

They kept Meriwether and me busy during the day. As much as Meriwether protested he mustn't leave his weaving, Nipa insisted we go outside and enjoy ourselves. Bundled up in more furs, we watched demonstrations of warriors fighting with sticks and throwing spears in a snow-filled field outside. The practice area was situated below the cliff palace at the base of the valley river. There were female warriors—or I suspected there were, though everyone was bundled up so much it was difficult to tell. Both the young and elders practiced. Even an old woman threw spears.

Meriwether nodded to the small figure on the other side of a field. "Oh look, there's Grandmother Ami."

Over the gust of wind I thought I detected the word, "Chinny, chin-chin man."

It was amazing watching her throw a spear. She must have thrown over fifty feet, her hunched frame straightening and untwisting with each launch. Even some of the younger warriors couldn't throw as far.

My mouth must have been hanging open as low as Meriwether's because Nipa laughed at us. "It's funny how misleading looks can be."

Meriwether's "wife" pulled him to his feet to join in the fun. How I wished she had chosen me instead. But then, it was just as well. Meriwether probably would have protested that proper young ladies didn't practice combat.

"Please teach him gently. He isn't a fighter," I shouted to Tomomi-san in Jomon.

The blue line tattooed above her mouth emphasized her mischievous smile. I looked to Nipa. "She won't hurt him, will she?"

"Do you truly think we would beat potential allies visiting from another land?" Nipa asked.

At home when Meriwether practiced his marksmanship with a laser pistol, he was incredibly accurate, but he had never excelled in wrestling or sports involving physical combat. While his younger brothers played games with balls, he sat in libraries or the music hall. He studied medicine and took walks in the botanical gardens. He loved medicine. Or at least he loved nursing me to health and doting on me as though I were ill even when I wasn't. I could imagine he'd make an attentive husband and a good father someday. A father more devoted to his children than mine had been.

Tomomi showed him how to hold his hands on the stick and where to place his feet. She wrapped her arms around him and swung their arms down.

"Is this really necessary? I think this position might be, ahem, a little inappropriate," Meriwether said.

Tomomi made no indication she understood, nor cared to.

Nipa leaned toward me. "I can only imagine what he would say if one of our male instructors was teaching him. With his pretty face, it's hard to say if he would be mistaken for a woman, no? And then he'd say he felt more than a stick poke him—"

I covered his mouth with my hands, fighting the giggle inside me. "Hold your tongue."

His response came out muffled and unintelligible. He bit my finger—not hard—but enough to get me to move my hand. He shook his head at me. "I see how you gaiyojin treat the great leader of the Tanukijin. You try to silence us and keep us from being heard." His grin told me his words were in jest. Despite his age, he was a winsome man when he smiled.

Meriwether's voice rose. "Truly? We hardly know each other!"

They practiced several techniques with her arms wrapped around him. She was so massive she made him look like a child. My gaze strayed to the others practicing sundry techniques.

I nodded to a group I had taken to be girls on the other side of the field. "I can see how practical it would be for a young lady to learn to fight so that she would not be helpless if there was ever an attack on her person." Even in my childhood I had been allowed more freedom than most girls, and had played sports and play fighting with other Chiramantepjin children. Yet, had my father permitted me to throw a spear or fight like Tomomi, mayhap I would have been able to defend myself against the memory thief.

"Ah," was Nipa's only reply.

Either when Tomomi felt Meriwether was ready—or after she'd decided she'd made him uncomfortable enough—she let him swing the stick on his own with the motions she'd taught.

She went easy on him, her movements slow as she barked out orders that he had already forgotten the meaning of. I shouted out a translation here or there. I cringed at how horrible he was at blocking a stick from hitting him. Tomomi's movements were so controlled, and she could close in with such speed each time her stick came in contact with his torso or appendages, she only gave him a light tap. He tripped backwards several times, once falling over when he stumbled on a rock, the other time when he attempted to dodge Tomomi's stick. Worse yet, he struck toward her with such force that his stick bounced off hers and he hit himself in the thigh. I only hoped the thick fur leggings that covered his trousers afforded some cushion.

He laughed and shrugged it off. "Oh, I'm so clumsy, aren't I?" That was one of Meriwether's strengths; he could laugh at his imperfections and not fall into despair over them. I envied that quality, and it made my esteem for him higher.

Tomomi shook her head. Her voice rumbled like thunder. "By my ancestor's graves! He makes me look like a horrible sensei."

Tomomi used Meriwether's momentum to twirl his stick around in a circle. When it swung out of his hands, it managed to hit him in the face and the arm. I turned my face away, unable to stand it. Several of the other bundled figures stopped practicing to watch. I felt embarrassed for him and suspected they'd invited us out here to set him up to look bad. It wasn't fair to expect a man who had never had need of fighting to learn such skills in an hour.

He wiped the sweat from his brow and squared his stance. A group of young men pointed and laughed. That was it. I would not let them poke fun at him.

Meriwether's grin was broad. "I'm improving, aren't I?"

"Indeed. You should stop while you're ahead." I marched over to where he practiced and laid a hand on his shoulder. Meriwether swayed and it was only then I saw he had a split lip. "It's gallant that you always try your best. Perhaps you should give someone else a turn. Would you mind keeping us company for a bit?"

I took the stick from him and held it out to Tomomi. She bowed to Meriwether but made no move to take the stick. She beckoned me closer. A mischievous smile crossed her visage.

I thought I understood what she was about. She wished me to fight her? Fine. Let them laugh at me instead.

Meriwether plopped down in a mound of snow next to Nipa. He held a handful of ice to his split lip.

I looked to Nipa. "You will permit me?"

"It isn't up to me. It's your choice."

I waited for the "but" or the passive aggressive tone that would indicate a true lady didn't do such things. None came. And none would, I reminded myself. I wasn't on the space station. Meriwether cradled his head in his hands. I gathered he was in no condition to object.

If Tomomi made a fool of me, so much the better. Meriwether deserved to see he wasn't alone in his lack of skill.

Tomomi instructed me as she had Meriwether. I had the benefit of understanding what she said, but I was no less coordinated than he had been at first. The main difference between us was my ability to not stumble over my own feet. That, and I had practiced stick fighting with Taishi as a youth.

It was a pleasant change to feel like I could move. Had I been wearing a corset I doubted I would have possessed the same agility.

"I don't like this one bit. She's too fragile for this," Meriwether complained.

I glanced away from Tomomi to find Nipa's hand on Meriwether's arm, yanking him down when he tried to get up. Tomomi smacked me on the forearm with her stick, far harder than she had hit Meriwether. The jolt of pain returned my attention to practice. The curse words of a space sailor leapt to my mind, but I dared not say them.

"Look at me," she said.

She moved more quickly, forcing me to pay heed to her words. Not only did her speed increase, but also she thrust her stick out with more force so that I had to work harder. Several times I found myself laughing at the sheer joy of the exercise. By the time Tomomi was through with me I was sweaty and panting. I shed my outer layers and still felt hot in the outside air.

"You learn quickly," Tomomi said. "Tomorrow I will give you a second lesson."

I glanced at Meriwether's crossed arms and sullen expression. "We'll see."

She grinned, exposing a set of yellowing, crooked teeth. "Tonight, maybe I will give you a different kind of lesson."

I laughed and shook my head, hoping that I had misunderstood her meaning.

I enjoyed the day, feeling like I was somewhere I belonged. That all came to an end at dinner. My comfort wearing the loose style of Tanukijin dress dissipated when I sat down amongst my own people.

Charbonneau's eyes widened at the sight of me. "Dearest Miss Earnshaw, what the blazes have they done to you?"

I rolled my eyes. "I promise, they didn't do anything to me that I hadn't already done to myself."

He quickly redirected his gaze to his food. "They've turned you into a savage. Really, is that any way for a proper young lady—especially an unwed one—to dress? Master Meriwether, have you attempted to talk sense into her?"

Meriwether sighed, though I wasn't sure whom he was more exasperated with. He shifted his back toward me. No doubt he was still cross about me practicing. Maybe he was even vexed I'd done better than him—something I now felt guilty about.

Charbonneau glanced from Meriwether to me and tsked. The one time I had felt at ease in years, it dissolved in a few seconds of chastising. Between his vehement concern and Captain Ford's leering, I supposed I would have to go back to wearing my off-world clothes.

Nipa kneeled at the head of the table with me to his right. He wordlessly watched the exchange. With his visage so expressionless, it was difficult to read what he might have been thinking.

I picked at the stringy meat on my plate. I suspected it was raccoon dog, but wasn't sure. Nor did I want to ask. My desire for conversation left me. Had I been given the choice I would have preferred to dine alone where I didn't have to worry about which world I wanted to fit into.

Sitting at the front of the room, I found it hard not to feel on display. People snuck furtive glances at us. If I looked up, they looked away. Children giggled and pointed until their parents slapped their hands down. At one point, a naked toddler wandered over and tugged on the long, blonde braid that hung down my back.

I turned and smiled. He grinned and toddled off to stare into Meriwether's pale green eyes and poked him in the face. At least I wasn't the only curiosity.

My muscles ached and I would have liked to fall into bed in an exhausted heap, but Tomomi came to me shortly after I retired to my room.

"Time for a lesson," she said in her deep, gruff voice.

"Tomorrow," I said. "I'm too tired to fight."

"Good." She kneeled behind the low table and beckoned me to sit across from her. "We will work on your mind. You need to understand how to concentrate."

"Why? I'm no warrior." Nor did I have any intention of becoming one.

Her gruff exterior softened. "You won't be able to exchange memories unless you work on your concentration. Do you understand that?"

"I don't want to perform memory exchange," I said.

She raised an eyebrow. "I am told you want your memories back. How do you expect to do so if you don't prepare yourself, mentally and physically?"

It felt like she'd smacked me in the stomach with one of her sticks. "Nipa told you?" It wasn't like I'd sworn him to secrecy, but I'd expected him to be discreet.

"Not exactly. He told me what he wanted me to teach you. Someone else told me about your memories. Are you ready to have another try?"

"Wait! Who told you? Meriwether?"

She shook her head. "Concentrate."

She made me sit and clear my mind. As if I could easily do so now that I wondered whom Nipa had told. A small, nagging thought tickled my brain that maybe he hadn't told her. Maybe Taishi was still alive and had confessed what he'd done.

It was hard to stay still and think of nothing. My mind wandered back to dinner and Charbonneau's comments and Meriwether's disapproval. I thought of my sister and wondered how she fared. Every time my mind wandered, Tomomi smacked my arm.

"Focus," she said.

After the third time I asked, "How do you know I'm not focusing?"

"Your eyes shift. Now focus."

After a few more smacks, I wondered if I would have bruises.

"What is going on in your head that you have so many thoughts cluttering your mind?" Tomomi asked.

I told her some of the matters plaguing my conscience. She repeated Taishi's name when I said it.

"Do you know him?" I asked.

She rubbed at the blue tattoo above her upper lip. "No one knows Taishi."

I didn't know if it was her words or her meaning I didn't understand. "Does he live here among the Tanukijin? Are there any of the Chiramantepjin left?"

"The surviving Chiramantepjin were assimilated into our clan. Some went to the sea and joined smaller tribes. If you please our leader, he may help you find the keeper of your memories—if he lives. Have you had your fill of questions? Now focus."

"Does that mean Taishi is still alive? Do you know anything about my sister?" She smacked me, and did so again when my mind thought up more questions.

Wasn't I relieved when Sumiko came in and dismissed Tomomi?

Sumiko helped me out of my furs and into my nighttime attush and took me to the onsen, promising there would be fewer people. There were still too many to tempt me back into the water. I scrubbed myself down with a cloth in the corner, doing my best not to expose myself to curious eyes.

When I returned to my room, Nipa waited on my bed of furs.
Chapter Nine

#

It is my hope that through making my own fortune, and finding my own planet on which to settle, I will be able to impress upon my parents that a woman can support herself without the aid of their blue-blooded, old money. I see no reason a lady must marry for title and fortune when we are perfectly capable of making our own. Is that not what it means to be a citizen of the United Worlds of America? If there is one thing I hope my daughters will learn, it is the tenacity to make their own ways in the galaxy—whether others approve or not.

—Entry from the journal of Clementine Earnshaw, the Santa Maria

I must have gasped to see him in my chamber, because he turned away from the fire. He didn't wear his headdress, though with his face turned from the light, the shifting shadows of the room made it difficult to make out more. I could see he was handsome, though not in the perfect way Meriwether was. His eyes were slightly asymmetrical but nicely shaped. A scar marred his cheek, but even so, it didn't take away from the square, masculine jaw or high cheekbones.

"Pardon me, but where's Sumiko?" I asked.

"She is seeing to the other guests' needs. She will be here shortly. In the meantime, I will keep you company."

I lingered near the door, uncertain whether it was the best idea to be unchaperoned at night with a man who was practically a stranger. I knew how Meriwether would feel—as well any other British citizen of New Campton Manor Space Station.

He patted the blankets. "Sit. I will behave."

Tentatively, I stepped forward. I kneeled on the blankets, but left an adequate amount of space between us.

He leaned his back toward the fire and stared into the darkness. "You must think I turn into a different person when the sun goes down."

"You don't think men and women do?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "You gaiyojin and your ways are so different and interesting. I like learning about your customs." He smoothed a hand over his short shorn hair. "Tell me what else is different."

"Oh? Everything. You know our manner of dress is different."

"Oh, yes. I hear we dress like savages, while my people think you dress like caged birds." He grinned.

I ignored that comment. "Everything on the ship and in space is convenient. We have running water and indoor plumbing. There are water closets in our rooms—not outhouses with holes in the ground. There's electricity, and nearly everything we want can be designed, made and delivered by automatons. Machines—"

"Yes, yes, I know. Tell me about the people, about you and what you do with your time." He reclined and propped himself up on an elbow.

I considered what he was asking. "Most accomplished young ladies spend their hours at embroidery and sewing, painting and drawing, and singing and music. We are permitted to read books and watch holos if the subject is not too taxing or inappropriate. Young ladies live for balls and spend much of their time in preparation of clothes, hair and dance lessons. They enjoy social engagements and invitations to tea or dining at another household."

He covered my lap with a blanket. "Which of those things do you do?"

"None, if I can help it." We both laughed. I sat back and untucked my legs from beneath me, making myself more comfortable. He had a way of making me feel at ease even if it wasn't the way of my people to spend time together like this alone. "I take long walks through the servant tunnels of the station to avoid the company of others."

Lord Klark spared no expense when it came to my health and happiness. If I told him I didn't wish to go to the ballet, he silenced his flustered wife and let me stay home. He allowed me to retire early from balls. He warned me when he thought events would tax me or there would be unsavory characters he wished to shelter me from. I assumed his interest in me was because he pitied me. Or, dare I admit, that he might actually care for me like a daughter. I didn't know he had guilted my grandparents into giving me an allowance and a future inheritance when they died.

When I turned twenty, Lord Klark took me aside and said, "My youngest daughter is now sixteen and she is planning her coming out ball. Will you let me throw you a ball soon? Perhaps a small gathering without too big of a crowd?" He patted my cheek. "I simply must be allowed to show off my charge in all her beauty and splendor."

I'd reluctantly consented. Of course, next had come his hints at what a good husband his son would make. I didn't like to argue with Lord Klark after all he'd done for me, but I made it clear I would never marry any man by choice.

Nipa spoke, bringing me back to the present. "If you do not attend balls, what do you do?"

"I sit and read, especially about things I'm not supposed to." A smile curled to my lips when I thought of the many volumes on science, medicine, and engineering that I'd stolen out of Meriwether's room. He had purchased many books printed on babbage cards pertaining to psychology and memory loss. He never questioned me when the copies went missing. "During the hours I must join the company of Meriwether's sisters, I often sew or try to fill my hours with something practical. But much of the time I sit at the windows and stare at the stars."

"What do you wish to find there?"

"My past. My future. Answers. A home. Mostly I think I make myself miserable thinking about things I have no power to change."

He took my hand in his. The warmth of his palm pressed against my ungloved hand was reassuring. I found I didn't want to pull away. "I told you I would help you with your memories. I have spoken to Grandmother Ami and the other elders about your situation—"

I recoiled. "You told more people? How many know?" Lord Klark had always impressed upon me the importance of silence.

"I needed to seek counsel from those wiser than myself. You must prepare mentally and physically. The stronger you feel, the more you will be ready for what comes. It is good that you learn to fight with Tomomi Sensei, ne? You must feel that you are stronger than any man."

"You make no sense. What do you refer to? Is the man who stole them alive—Taishi? Is he here? There's a way to get my memories back?"

He sandwiched my hands between his once again, encasing me in his calm. He spoke slowly, impressing upon me the importance of his words, though I didn't completely understand them. "I cannot answer all your questions at this time. What I do want to impress upon you is this: if you want memories, you must not be afraid of memory exchange. The elders suggested that if Tomomi Sensei trains you, you will not be afraid of being alone with a man, and that is the first step."

I threw up my hands in exasperation. "I don't want memories. I want my memories and there's no point in training if the man who has them is dead."

"There may be another way to retrieve parts of memories, only you must be able to perform memory exchange. It is important not to feel fear. You must be able to defend yourself physical and mentally. Do you understand?"

"There's no point. I am smaller and weaker. Gaiyojin ladies do not—"

He held up a hand. "Felicity-san, I am sorry about your past. And sorrier still for what I am about to do." He sat up. In one fluid motion, he pushed me back into the furs and pinned my hands above my head. I let out a startled shriek. I tried to pull my arms away but he held fast.

"Use your mind. Outwit me," he said.

My heart raced and my vision blurred with the hot sting of tears. It took a moment to realize he wasn't pressing himself against me. He wasn't undressing me or making any attempt to injure me. He stared into my face, remaining perfectly still as he waited.

I blinked away the tears and reminded myself not to panic. He nodded. My heart calmed. I assessed what I could control. My legs. Before he could make a move to stop me, I lifted a knee as fast and hard as I could. It impacted with his inner thigh, not quite as high as I'd hope. Nonetheless, he released his grip on my wrists and I easily pushed him onto his side.

A few unintelligible grunts escaped his lips before he said, "See, I knew you could do it."

"How dare you scare me like that to make a point!"

The gasp at the door made me turn. Sumiko stared in wide-eyed horror. She turned to go and then came back. She hovered, undecided. I had no idea how much she had seen.

Nipa crawled to his feet and left of his own accord. He had, indeed, pressed upon my greatest problem. I wanted my memories and I had promised myself I would do whatever it took to get them back.
Chapter Ten

In the Tanukijin legends, the Jomon say they arrived here from the stars by dragons. Incidentally, the word for dragon, "tatsu," also means "to build." It's a pity they lost all that technology and now don't even know how to build a proper outhouse.

—Faith Earnshaw's private diaries

On the morrow, I ate breakfast with Nipa in his room. Sumiko joined us on this morning. I wasn't sure if this was at her request or his. It was just as well, for I scarcely said two words to him and conversed with her instead. I was still mad at him about the night before.

"How long do you intend to be angry with me?" Nipa asked in English.

"You have given me cause to distrust you. More than once."

Sumiko glanced from one of us to the other. "Excuse me, older brother," she said. She crossed to the other side of the room and busied herself with folding blankets near the hearth.

Nipa said, "If I had simply told you that you are capable of being clever, do you think you would have believed me? You already hold my words with so little esteem that you don't believe me when I tell you the truth."

I didn't answer. It was hard to argue when you couldn't disagree with someone. He took my hand and held it in his. "I promise to save further deception for the training arena. Yes?"

I nodded.

After the first meal, I trained with Tomomi Sensei until noon. Where her charge had gone off to I didn't know until Meriwether and Charbonneau helped Captain Ford hobble out to the snowy grounds.

"Really, where's the harm in a woman dressing like these savages if she's completely covered?" the captain said. I was so bundled up I doubted he would have even known it was me except that my long, blonde braid fell out from under my tanuki-style head covering.

I glanced over at them.

Tomomi Sensei poked me in the ribs with a stick. "Pay attention."

"Master Meriwether, I truly don't know why you allow this behavior," Charbonneau chided.

"If you ask me, I like a feisty woman who can hold her own—between the covers." Captain Ford was the only one who laughed at his own joke.

I endured listening to them until they wandered on. By that time, I ached all over and begged for Tomomi to let me rest.

"Go soak in the onsen," she commanded. "It is time for me to attend to that husband of mine anyway."

I went to the onsen, hoping I might find it empty. It wasn't. I thought I heard a badly pronounced version of my name but conversations stopped when I entered. I passed the moss-covered wall, considering whether I could get over the taboo of nudity. I placed a hand on the wall as I eased myself onto a stool. My fingers went numb, feeling asleep yet simultaneously awake. I wiped my hand against my robe. The friction flared like fire in my fingers. It wasn't just the one wall covered in green. Memory moss grew on nearly all the walls and the ceiling of the bathhouse.

I used a cloth to bathe myself and left without soaking. On the table in my room were laid a set of clean furs. I reached for them, but paused. Next to those rested my gaijin clothes. I preferred the warm and comfortable Tanukijin style of dress. Even so, I was not Jomon. I knew what was expected of me. I did my best to fasten my corset over my chemise. I rebraided my hair and pinned it up. When Sumiko came in, I beseeched her to tie my corset tighter.

"Iya, you really are wearing a cage. Why do you do this to yourself?" Sumiko asked.

"Geari," I said, using a word that had no translation in my language. It was something between social obligation, guilt and a gift you had to give others.

"Ah," she said.

"Have you ever heard of a man named Taishi?" I asked. "I knew him from the first time I was on Planet 157—er—on Aynu-Mosir."

"Taishi no longer exists. He lives as a ghost." Her voice was soft and she stopped lacing my corset and placed her hands on my shoulders.

I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. My memories were gone then. Taishi was gone. On days like this, when I could remember his crescent eyes and chubby cheeks, it was hard to imagine he would have stolen them.

"Faith-chan once told me he has your memories."

I turned to face her. "Faith? You know my sister?" Surely she knew her well if she managed to pronounce my sister's name. That and the use of "chan" lead me to believe she either knew her well or considered her like a child.

She turned her gaze downward. "I apologize. It isn't my place to speak on such matters. You must put all questions to my brother."

"Not at all. I just want to know if she's alive—if she's well. I want to see her."

Sumiko smiled, though her expression didn't reach her eyes. "Yes, you must miss her. She will be so . . . happy to see you."

The great hall where Sumiko led me was drafty and cold. I was glad I had my cloak to throw over my traveling dress. Daylight spilled in from the windows along with a few flurries. I admired the spiral patterns and stylized tanuki painted in blue and black dyes decorating the tapestries on the walls. Dried fish hanging from the ceiling swayed when a gust of wind blew in.

The men of my party sat together. Children gathered around as Meriwether animatedly told a story. He gestured wildly with his hands and occasionally Tomomi translated a word she understood. She didn't understand many.

I stood to the side, not wishing to interrupt. I ruminated on Sumiko and what she might be hiding. Was it that Faith wouldn't be happy to see me? That was ridiculous. Were they lying that she was alive? Perhaps someone had stolen her memories as well.

Meriwether said, "'Let me in, let me in,' said the big, bad wolf.

"But the three little pigs said, 'Not by the hair of our chinny chin-chin.'"

The children screeched with laughter. Sumiko turned away and covered her mouth. Tomomi laughed so hard, tears spilled down her cheeks. Even some of the adults glanced at each other and smiled. Charbonneau and the captain both looked puzzled.

The old toothless woman from the day before looked from me to Meriwether and pointed at him. "Chinny, chin-chin man."

Meriwether nodded. "Indeed, Grandmother Ami."

I hid my smile under my hand as her words from the day before dawned on me. I had forgotten that in Jomon chin-chin was children's slang for penis.

Nipa must have been watching the storytelling. I was aware of his presence when he nudged me with an elbow. "Tell him what he said in Jomon."

I shook my head. "No, he would be mortified."

"So?"

"So I care about his feelings."

He traced one of the horns on his headdress with a finger. "Why do you care so deeply? Do you love this man? I thought most gaiyojin women haven't the freedom to marry for love."

I didn't answer. My love life wasn't any of his business.

Meriwether sat taller when he saw me. "Good day to you, Felicity dear. You look more yourself today. How do you feel?"

I bowed my head, a Jomon gesture more than one he would recognize.

"They really like my storytelling." From his earnest grin I could see he didn't suspect he'd said something wrong. "They've asked me to recite the story of The Three Little Pigs several times already."

A child tugged on his sleeve. "Chinny, chin-chin." The boy burst into giggles and ran off.

I turned away, unable to keep a straight face as he finished the story. I felt guilty for laughing. If nothing else, he was my friend and he would be my husband someday. It didn't seem right a lady should derive amusement from jokes made at her fiancé's expense. Then again, making him privy to the fact he was the joke hardly seemed more becoming.

When the story was done, Charbonneau helped Captain Ford to his feet.

The captain nodded to Nipa. "How about that tour you promised, eh?"

Nipa eyed Captain Ford's bandaged leg and shook his head. He addressed me. "This man is not fit for a long walk."

I had to agree. I translated.

"You need not fret over my sake. I'm fit as a fiddle." He muttered under his breath. "And ready to make my fortune finding those red diamonds."

Nipa's face remained expressionless as though he hadn't understood. I had played enough whist and witnessed enough card games that I could imagine his poker face would be the envy of every other player. The notion of games lent me an idea.

I placed a hand on Nipa's arm. "What if you share some other aspect of the Tanukijin culture today and save the tour for another day? Perhaps we can share games or music, dance or some other art form. It could be a mental tour more than a physical one. A way to exchange cultures."

A strained smile stretched over Meriwether's face. His gaze was glued on my hand resting on the Tanukijin leader's arm. I promptly removed it.

Nipa bowed his head at me. "You are very wise, despite your youth, ne? I will consent to this suggestion. Give me but a moment to make preparations and I will retrieve you."

When I translated, Meriwether suggested another round of The Three Little Pigs. "How about Little Red Riding Hood instead?" I asked.

Meriwether leaned toward me, lowering his voice as we followed Sumiko through a drafty hallway. "Do you believe in ghosts? I think this castle is haunted."

I laughed nervously, pretending the word "ghost" didn't remind me of what Sumiko had told me about Taishi. "I think you must understand that the Jomon treat everything as a joke. It isn't that they're trying to be cruel, but they have different values than ours and one way they diffuse tension is to play harmless pranks. It is very likely someone is trying to jest with you. Just like they did with the wife-swap."

Meriwether frowned and shook his head.

We were ushered into a partially covered courtyard outside where bundled children played. Small drifts of snow were spread throughout the grounds. Save for a few trees and benches, the area was devoid of much.

Our guide for the first game was a girl of about eight, Little Ami—named after her grandmother—who showed us a pebble throwing game. I could see why Nipa had selected this game, as Captain Ford could sit and play. I was very bad at it, but I had fun watching Meriwether play with the children. He was going to make a wonderful father someday.

"Look, I won!" Meriwether was practically jumping up and down. Charbonneau clapped politely. He had refused to join in the games.

"That's because they let you win," Captain Ford said with a snort.

I regretted that it was true. I had actually heard the children conspire to let him win. Nonetheless, I didn't want the captain to put him down.

"Nonsense," I said. "The captain is simply jealous because he didn't win. Bravo, Meriwether."

I glanced around for Sumiko and Nipa but neither remained in the courtyard. Little Ami instructed us in ohajiki, another pebble game, hana ichi monme, a game like Red Rover, and beigoma, a top spinning game. We played with the group of children.

I knelt amongst a group of bundled-up girls. I let them pat my blonde hair and showed them my pocket watch. One of the girls whispered to another. "She looks like Heisu-san and Michi-chan. Maybe all gaiyojin are this way." They both giggled.

Heisu was the closest most Jomon could come to pronouncing my sister's name. I returned my gaze to the pebbles before us, doing my best not to act too interested in hearing about my sister. "Who is Michi-chan?" The name was Jomon, but if she looked like me she must be another foreigner.

The girls whispered amongst themselves. Their expressions became guarded. They lacked the diplomacy to smile and pretend everything was all right like Sumiko had.

"Daughter," one girl said.

"Oh." It hadn't occurred to me Faith might have a family

"Have you met Heisu-san?" I asked. "She was my sister. She was so pretty when she was your age. She looked very much like our mother." I couldn't actually see her face that day, only a blur. Perhaps if I succeeded in reclaiming my memories, all past recollections would be clearer.

No one answered. All smiles were gone now.

Ami wandered over from where she watched Meriwether play with the boys. She placed her hands on her hips. "How about another game of hana ichi monme?"

When I suggested the idea in English, Meriwether nodded.

"Not so fast. It ain't a cultural exchange unless we teach them a game in return." Captain Ford rubbed at his sideburns. "Hmm. How about we teach them boxing?"

"No!" Meriwether and I both shouted.

Charbonneau coughed. "Might I instead put forth the suggestion of tag?"

In the evening, Tomomi Sensei gave me another lesson in concentration, and Sumiko assisted me in undressing.

She made idle chatter as she unlaced my corset. "I think you are a good vacation for my brother. I have never seen him rest, nor take a moment from his duties. He even takes his eboshi off before you. I think you are an enchantress. Do gaijin have women who cast spells on men?"

"Only in stories." I laughed. "Surely you exaggerate. He must relax sometimes."

"No, he is too serious. He never rests. Winter is an anxious time and brings us sorrow, so this time of year is usually the hardest."

The winter my people had caused with our machines. The thought discouraged me.

I went to the onsen on my own to scrub myself and massage oils into my dry skin. Fewer women lounged about, for the hour was late. When I returned, Nipa kneeled on my bed. He sat with his back to the fire, staring into the darkness as if waiting for me.

I leaned against the door frame. "I begin to think your sister finds ways to busy herself simply so you might spend the evening with me."

Nipa shook his head. "Quite the opposite. Because my duties have shifted to entertaining guests and spending time with you, she must do more than usual. I am fortunate my sister appreciates how important it is for us to get to know each other and she is willing to help without complaint."

I padded closer. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize we were a burden. You should let us help with chores." It was bad enough my people had made the lives of the Jomon worse, but my guilt swelled knowing we had given them more day-to-day work since arriving.

He patted the blankets beside him. "You have a generous heart, Felicity-san. I will consider this for tomorrow."

Reluctantly I sat. The logs popped and flinched. He didn't seem to mind the silence, but I did. "When we are alone like this, you wish me to be less formal?"

He nodded.

I cleared my throat. "The Chiramantepjin custom was for a woman to call a man 'husband' in private. I am not quite sure if that is appropriate. What am I to call you when you aren't acting as leader?"

"Since taking up the eboshi of leader, I have never been anyone but Nipa. In hard times as now, I am always leader." He drummed his fingers again his chin. "You can call me anata." A smile tugged at his lips.

That was the equivalent of "sweetheart." I laughed at that, but stopped when I saw he was serious. I bowed my head in apology. "Gomen nasai."

"Until you decide you wish to call me something more intimate, call me Hoku Nipa."

"Hoku," I repeated. I'd heard that name once before back in the Chiramantepjin village. Using his name was like when we called Taishi's mother Shoko Mama or Shoko Nipa depending on whether she wore her eboshi or not.

He took my hand in his. I resisted the temptation to pull away. I told myself to be in the moment, not in the past, like Tomomi Sensei had instructed earlier in the evening. I focused on the texture of his calloused fingers smoothing over the back of my hand. I contemplated the beauty of shadow and light dancing over our skin. There was something both enticing and attractive about Jomon features. I stared into the depths of his black eyes, feeling as though I could fall into them.

Mayhap that was a little too in the moment.

"How will you help me retrieve my memories?" I asked. "Will you search for Taishi?"

"There are matters more basic that must be dealt with first. Grandmother Ami tells me there are ways to retrieve thoughts about your memories—though not the memories themselves. For example, think of breakfast this morning. Did you like the side of berries in the little bowl?"

I nodded. The morsel of fresh fruit had been the favorite part of my meal.

"If you were to give me that memory, you would not have that memory inside you, but you might have the thought from just now that you liked the berries. You would still know you enjoyed breakfast even if you couldn't taste the berries any longer. Do you understand?" His hand was warm on mine, inviting and reassuring.

His gentleness made it easier for me to speak. "Except if someone took my memories of all day. Then I wouldn't have the memory of this morning, nor the reflection that I had liked them."

He nodded. "True. It is possible you may still have reflections. If you learn to feel more comfortable around Jomon—and, dare I say, me—we might revive some of your reflections. A memory from long ago that we think we have forgotten can become vivid and clear, and so it is with the feelings around memories. You may have more inside you than you know. We won't be certain unless we try memory exchange to reveal them."

Memory exchange was asking a lot. Then again, I supposed it was asking something of him as well. He was the one who had to be patient and put up with my resistance. "Why are you willing to help me?"

"I am the leader of the Tanukijin. It is my duty to take care of my people as well as atone for my people's actions."

"What do you mean? Are you talking about the meeting of the tribes and the attack? Were you there? Did you see what happened?" All I remembered was the fire and the accusations that the dragon clan had been behind it. I opened my mouth to ask more.

Nipa held up a hand to stop me from asking more questions. "I was not leader then. Nor have I the power to remedy the darkness of that day. What I can do, as leader and as your temporary husband, is attend to your needs. Returning your memories is your greatest need, ne?" Even with his back to the fire I could see the depth in his soulful eyes. "It is my duty, but more than anything, I cannot stand for such a thing to have happened to any human being." A mischievous grin transformed his face, making him look younger. "That and it does benefit me, does it not? For the future wife of my planet's conqueror to be happy means she might rule over us wisely and have mercy on my people."

I laughed. "Truly you don't think we're conquerors, do you, Hoku?"

He smiled and blushed. I wondered if it was from the use of his name. "I haven't decided yet. But enough of tomorrows. Tonight, tell me something of your life." He placed a blanket around my shoulders.

I was of two minds. First the comfortableness I felt around him. Then, how he was getting too close. The wife-swap gave him liberty to act familiar. I thought of the maneuver Tomomi Sensei had taught me earlier that morning. It involved an elbow to the gut. Of course, such a gesture would hardly have proven an ability to trust him. And that was what I needed to be able to do if I was going to allow him to help me. Nipa placed a separate blanket around his own shoulders and remained separately cocooned. Immediately, I felt better. And simultaneously worse.

I was tired of my suspicious nature keeping people at bay, even the most friendly and innocuous. It was hard to imagine how I would even marry Meriwether. If I didn't at least try to retrieve my past as I'd set out to do, would I ever be able to trust anyone?

"Tell me of a happy time you remember and then I will tell you one of mine," he said.

I considered what I could share that didn't bring me pain. I wasn't sure there were any memories not tainted by Taishi's presence. I sat for so long thinking that he asked, "Are you willing to share yourself with me this way?"

I smiled at his courteousness and dipped my head. "My memories of my mother are my happiest memories. Back when I was a child, space travel was slower and it took three and a half years to get here from the hyperjump point, whereas now it takes only one. She died along the way. Prior to that, I had two parents who doted on my sister and me. My mother was an heiress—or a former heiress. She was meant to inherit a large sum of money upon her parents' death. Her parents had picked out a man they wished her to marry—a man they said owned three asteroids and a space station. A man wealthy enough to buy a planet." I untucked the section of blanket where I had hidden my father's pocket watch and retrieved it. The comfort of the constant ticking reminded me I was alive, even if he wasn't.

"Like the Klark Nipa?" he asked. "It is said he wishes to purchase this planet."

I frowned. "No, I think Lord Klark is even wealthier." And Lord Klark couldn't purchase the planet. After the fiasco with the Oregon Territories, the United Worlds and British Empire had agreed to only allow uninhabited worlds to be purchased. At least, they only allowed worlds they knew to be uninhabited. Most people, even those on the voyage to Planet 157, denied the possibility of people living here. If they knew about the Jomon, surely they wouldn't try to buy up plots of land, as that was against our agreed-upon laws. The idea they didn't know unsettled me. When we returned to the ship, we had to contact Lord Klark. Or better yet, someone in charge of planetary acquisitions in the British Empire of Planets.

Nipa touched my shoulder, bringing me back to the present. "I beg your pardon. I interrupt your story."

"My mother didn't want to marry the man her parents chose for her. She wished to choose for herself. She eloped with my father, a lowly cartographer who was not of noble birth. Her parents expressed their displeasure by revoking her income and future wealth."

"It is rare to marry for love? Do you marry Meriwether for love?"

I was too tired to explain my reasons for marrying Meriwether, nor was it any of his business. "My mother decided she would make her own fortune. She borrowed money and hired a crew. Unlike most ladies, she had been raised to be business-minded and excelled in bossing people around."

Nipa laughed at this. "Ah, like you, ne?"

His mirth was contagious. "Yes, but she somehow made my people listen to her. She convinced a man like a Nipa—only he was the leader of many stars—to hire her to survey a newly discovered planet. A business man from a different star sector had rights to the mining operations in the poles, but the Nipa told her he would grant her choice of territories on the planet when she completed her mission. Only she died in space and my father had to finish for her. He had no heart in it and he wanted to leave. I think he only stayed for the potential to earn a living." I tried to remember one of the happy moments with her. "My mother used to read to us and tell us stories. The computer was full of educational texts, and though there were stories of Earth and its people, none compared to the way she told a tale. She taught us lullabies and waltzes—that's a kind of dance." I pictured her radiant face in my memory, her long blonde hair pinned up in a bun and wisps of hair escaping. Hair that was much like mine, only I didn't think my face had the same classically elegant proportions. Nor was her complexion marred by freckles. My sister had been so much more beautiful—so much more like our mother.

I yawned and closed my eyes, trying to imagine the way she'd looked when she was healthy and strong—before the cancer had made her sick. Her face was still fuzzy today. "I stopped being able to see her clearly after my memories were stolen."

He nodded. "When too many memories are shared it can affect the ones you still keep within you." He placed an arm around my shoulder and squeezed me to his side. "I see you are tired. I will leave you thinking of those happy thoughts. Tomorrow you shall teach us waltzes." He pulled away as though he would go.

"No, no, tell me one of your memories. Can you tell me about my sister? How you met her? What she is like now? No one will tell me anything about her."

"If it pleases you. Let me think . . . your sister. At first it was very difficult for her here. She did not fit in, nor did she wish to be here alone without you."

"She blames me for leaving her?" My throat tightened.

"Not at all. If anything, she blames herself for not protecting you. But those are matters best shared between sisters, and it is not my place to speak for her. I wish to tell you about her accomplishments. It took her a long time to figure out where she fit amongst the survivors of the Jomon. Much of her identity for so long was based on her living in your shadow. When she came to the Tanukijin, she was lost and had no idea how to be herself without being an outsider."

It broke my heart to imagine my fragile, little sister struggling on her own. She had never been independent. She had always needed me.

"Faith-chan, ano, Faith-san was very shy and quiet." He stumbled over the honorific and I wondered why. Did he think of her as a child because she was an off-worlder? Did he know her well and that allowed him to use a familiar title? I puzzled over it as he went on.

"It was hard for the Tanukijin to get to know Faith-san. After a time, her hands came to speak for her when her words weren't forthcoming. She came to be known for her artistry, not only in drawing and painting, but she sketched designs for weavers and sculptors. One time, a woman from the Isepojin clan—back when there was still a tribe of Isepojin in the south—came all the way from the mountains to see if Faith would design the tattoos for her arms. She wanted Faith-san to create something that represented the trials she had faced as a woman, and she thought your sister to be the only artist worth consulting. Now all the women go to Faith-san for her counsel in tattoos. And when there are matters of great importance regarding the gaiyojin colonists or ships, she is the first that my tribe and smaller groups go to for advice."

I smiled at the idea of my sister doing well enough to earn the respect and admiration of the Tanukijin.

"And her children? Her husband?" I asked.

He shook his head. "She has no children."

I crossed my arms, letting the blanket fall from my shoulders. "I'm aware her daughter's name is Michi."

A furrow creased between his brows. "Who told you that?"

My voice rose. "Why is it is such a secret? Why won't people tell me about her?"

"Faith-san doesn't have a daughter." The warmth in his voice hardened. "You will learn about your sister's life here when she speaks with you herself."

"When will that be? Where is she now? You said you would send word to her and she would come."

"You must have patience."

"You are avoiding answering me!"

"Yes, because I don't have an answer." His voice rose now too. "How am I supposed to save face when you demand an answer and I have none to give? I have sent for her. That is all I can tell you. I feel shame there isn't more that I can tell you about her. Do you doubt that I am being insincere when I tell you this?"

From the wounded expression on his face, I didn't doubt my question caused him pain. There was so much more to the mystery of my sister that I didn't understand.

The fourth day passed much as the previous day. In the morning, I had my training while dressed in the native style of clothes. This time Tomomi Sensei taught me hand-to-hand combat. In the afternoon, I was dressed like a lady again with Sumiko's assistance so that I could teach games and waltzing to the Tanukijin. Meriwether was a better teacher than I, and he hummed the tune as he instructed the curious youths who wanted to learn. In the evening, Tomomi Sensei taught me to focus my thoughts and clear my mind. When I said I couldn't clear my mind with the way I fretted for my sister, she only grunted. I didn't get as many smacks in the arm, so I suspected I was improving. Nipa joined me in my room again afterward.

"Tell me another happy memory," he asked.

My other happy memories involved Taishi. I didn't want to talk about him. Certainly I had memories with my sister, but many of them also included Taishi in some way.

"Perhaps you are tired and cannot think of something at the moment. Shall I share with you instead?" Nipa asked.

I nodded.

He wrapped the blanket around our shoulders. I didn't move away when he left his arm on my shoulder. He held the blankets close around us to keep the heat in. My heart raced at the idea of being so near a man unchaperoned. The logical part of my brain knew what he was doing; each night he made sure we knew each other a little more and that I learned to trust him.

This was practical, I told myself. My trepidation had nothing to do with the fact that he was handsome, or I enjoyed his humor. It most certainly couldn't be because I enjoyed spending time with him. I was betrothed to Meriwether. That was real. This tsuma no kokan was but a temporary bond, and I would do well to remember the British citizens of the New Campton Manor Station would see it as scandalous if they found out I had compromised myself in this way. I was fortunate Meriwether trusted me.

Nipa rubbed his shorn hair absently. "My favorite memories are of my wife. I think all my happy memories were of her. It was not love at first sight, but love at second sight. I had known her for many years and she was a dear friend." The calm lullaby-like tone of his voice calmed my nerves. I found myself leaning my head against his shoulder as the tension released from my aching muscles. "After knowing her for a time, one day I saw her differently. It was a slow kind of love, like the blossoms on the sweet nut tree. They open gradually and they stay as fragrant blossoms so long you don't notice the green fruit budding underneath. The flower lasts for months, and then suddenly the petals fall off in the wind and a ripe fruit is there with the sweet nut inside."

I liked this better than Meriwether's love at first sight, which I suspected was the love of an idea. He wanted an exotic princess raised by savages whose heart he could tame for the romance of it. I knew as much from reading his diary, something he'd be mortified to know I'd done. Later I'd felt guilty about it.

I imagined Nipa growing up with a girl in his village and slowly growing to love her more and more with time. Perhaps I liked this idea because it was so similar to my own experience with my first love.

I touched his hand holding the blankets closed. He released it to lace his fingers through mine. "I loved her for her strength. What might have made one child cry, drove her to anger—and then to action. She was different from the other girls—and she was so different from me. She spoke her mind in ways I could not and brought out opinions in me when I thought I had none. She was more generous than I was, and I wanted to be what she was and possess the qualities she had. I think she taught me how to be a better leader and how to be clever enough to be a leader to outwit my foes."

"Hoku Nipa," I said. "What happened to her?"

"That is not a happy memory." He paused so long I thought he meant not to answer but he continued. "So many bad things happened when the gaiyojin came. First it was disease. Then they attacked our tribes when they came together to meet."

I interrupted, "Lord Klark told me the natives attacked during the meeting. I assumed it was the dragon clan."

Nipa snorted. "It was the gaiyojin who tore apart the mountains and flattened them. They destroyed the jungle and diverted the river for their homesteads. Much of our livelihood from the land disappeared. We experienced famine and drought. The last blow to us was the flying machine that changed the shape of the earth. It caused great clouds of dust to rise and linger in the sky. Our seasons changed. Tribes from the north migrated south where the weather was still tolerable. Only because many tribes became one with the Tanukijin and we knew the ways of the mountains and cold could we survive.

"With every hardship my people experienced, my wife was at my side, keeping me strong. It was hard for her too. Members from both our families died. She endured with me, but over time she grew more and more depressed. It was after she had our baby that she became . . ." His voice cracked and he swallowed. "Became ill."

He turned away from the firelight. It was too late. I'd already seen the tears. I crawled in front of him and wrapped my arms around his neck and enveloped him in the blanket. He slipped his arms around me.

My heart felt as though it were breaking all over again. Not for him, but for my own sorrows, for having lost those I loved. I kissed the wet streaks on his cheeks, wishing someone would kiss away my sorrows. I remembered my faux pas too late.

Jomon did not kiss.

Reluctantly, he pushed my shoulders back. "This is too much closeness right now. I do not want you to think I intend to harm your virtue. And at this moment, I cannot stand for you to see mine."

I didn't think he quite grasped the meaning of the word. I suspected he meant vulnerability, but I didn't correct him.

He cleared his throat. "I must be a good husband and stop thinking of my sorrows and think of yours. Tomorrow I will do something I have been dreading. In order to help you with the problem of your memories, I will let you beat me with sticks on the practice field."

We both laughed at this joke.
Chapter Eleven

There is a small problem with your plan. The captain has informed me that the planet is already inhabited.

—Mr. Foster, first mate, in a private message sent by hyperspeed mail to Lord Klark

I woke to the sound of children giggling again, wondering if this would be my alarm clock during the next nine days. Nine days. . . . I touched the ticking pocket watch hidden under my blankets. Would this be enough time for me to revive reflections of memories? I didn't want to leave until I understood what had happened during my past. And I most certainly wasn't leaving until I saw Faith.

I saw Sumiko for all of two minutes. She came in to dress me in my corset, explaining she would have no time to assist me later, and then fluttered off to her other duties. I instantly regretted my decision five minutes later, but there was no one to help me out of the corset by that point. My muscles ached from practicing with Tomomi Sensei the day before and the corset made no improvements to my condition. With the window open, letting in the diffused sunlight, I bundled in furs over my high-collared blouse.

I took breakfast with Nipa, today pickled vegetables and jerky made of dried fish. He sat next to me rather than across from me, demonstrating how to eat the meal. I imitated the way he broke the fish into thin strips before chewing a piece. He nodded approvingly. In the silence of our chewing, I gazed at the mural of a summer jungle painted on his wall. I'd never seen Earth, but I imagined the jungles that had once existed must have been very similar.

Nipa held up a pickled fruit with his hashi and offered it to me.

I appreciated the way he had permitted me my privacy and didn't insist on staying in my bed the night before even if my customs were alien to him. He made no rebuke that I chose clothes other than those he provided. If anything, I was the one vexed that he should always be wearing his tanuki mask.

"Do you always wear your headdress during the day?" I asked. Even Taishi's mother hadn't worn her chiramantep headdress as much as this. I knew he was handsome from the glimpses I'd seen of his chiseled jaw and straight nose. By firelight he was winsome, but firelight made everyone look their best. If I was to know him, to trust him, I would have liked to see more than a mouth and chin by daylight.

He set down his tea. "Only when I must be a leader for my people do I wear my tanuki eboshi. I cannot wear it when I sit in the onsen or sleep because I cannot be leader at those times." His lips twitched into a devilish smile. "I am lucky it is not summer, for I would never wish to be leader. The eboshi is too warm."

I considered the times Taishi's mother removed her ornamental belt and her blue headdress. She had said she didn't wear it when she served in her role as mother. In their treehouse among family, she only dressed in her skirt and jewelry like the other women.

"Must you be a leader in your own private chambers as well?" I stretched my neck, trying to loosen the aching muscles.

He leaned forward. "I think you are trying to have a peek at my stunning face. Am I right?"

My face flushed with heat.

He laughed when I didn't answer. "Your face turns a pretty pink when you are embarrassed." He took my chin in his hands, angling my face toward him. His lips were mere inches from mine. "I cannot be tempted to remove my eboshi so easily. If I do, you will surely be like other young ladies and lose all sense when you gaze upon me. I shall not be a good leader if I have maidens throwing themselves at me. You will have to work much harder if you wish me to remove my attire."

I rolled my eyes. He was a little too confident for his own good. I'd always found Meriwether's humility and modesty to be annoying. It wasn't just experience he lacked, but self-assurance. Now I suspected I was seeing the other extreme. Even so, this was more enjoyable to laugh at.

I wrenched my chin away and covered my mouth to hide my smile. "It seems that if you are to be a husband, you cannot be a leader at the same time. When you are in your private chambers with your many wives, which do you choose to be, leader or husband? How can I call you Hoku when you are dressed as a nipa?"

"My many wives? You are so funny, Felicity-san." He leaned back and laughed. "I think you are right." He tapped one of the horns on the headdress. "These horns would get in the way of intimate time spent with my many wives. If it is your wish for me to be a husband in my private chamber, then I will let you remove my attire."

I shook my head. "I have no desire to remove your clothes. Only your eboshi." I raised a hand, hesitating when I saw the twinkle in his eyes. He made no move to stop me.

I grasped the horns and slid the headdress back. It was heavier than I had expected. I set it on my lap.

The leather underneath the mask was smooth, but folds and creases from the underside had pressed lines into his cheekbones and nose. The weight of the horns left impressions on his forehead. He rubbed his hands over his face, which did little to alleviate the creases and only made his skin rosy.

Even with the lines from the mask, he was ruggedly handsome. His wide jaw and lean face made him look so much more masculine than Meriwether's soft, baby face or Taishi's chubby cheeks. I had always favored the black eyes and high cheekbones of Jomon features. Even Nipa's visage, so different from other men I had gazed upon previously, was beautiful. I doubted he was joking when he said women threw themselves at him.

"Well, what do you think? Was it a mistake? Am I going to have one more woman attempt to rip off the rest of my clothes?" A touch of silver threaded through his short hair, something I hadn't noticed in the firelight.

I shook my head. "I can resist."

"How disappointing." He sighed overdramatically. "I will have to wait another nine days for Tomomi Sensei to become my wife again so that she might fully undress me, ne?"

I giggled at the ridiculousness of the idea. I handed him his headdress, which he replaced. His eyes lingered on my lips. It was unnerving he should stare so intently. I busied myself with tearing off another strip of jerky. I chewed, finding it especially tough.

He refilled my cup from the pot. "It softens if you put it in the tea."

I soaked it. A minute later I chewed it. When I took a sip of tea I did my best not to make a face.

He winked. "Of course, now you have fish-flavored tea."

I gulped it down anyway.

"I wish we had something more palatable to offer you. I think you're used to our summertime fruits and fresh meats. We've already used most of our stores of fruit and vegetable preserves. We can only forage between storms."

"It's a good example of your hardships." With modern technology, we had been fortunate in our ability to grow any food at any time on the temperature-controlled space station. "I'm sorry we've caused these changes to your world."

He took my hand. "You understand better than most gaiyojin."

The sensation of his thumb rubbing against the back of my hand distracted me from what else he said. I bethought of the way I had forgotten myself the night before and kissed his wet cheeks. His arms had been warm and welcoming. I could easily have compromised myself if he had been any British citizen of the galaxy who would have read more into that kiss than it meant. At least, I told myself, it hadn't been anything more than a way of comforting him.

The room suddenly felt intolerably stuffy, even with a window open.

After breakfast, Nipa hooked my hand through his arm, a gesture very much like a true gentleman. "I will escort you to your training," he said.

He watched me practice as Tomomi instructed me in the arts of self-defense. Immediately I noticed the way my corset restricted my movements. When I fell over into the snow, I couldn't right myself without Tomomi's help. My skirt was drafty and soon became soaked and heavy.

The third time I fell over, she wouldn't help me up.

"You are a horrible pupil today. You move like something is wrong with you. What ails you?" She nodded to Nipa. "Has your husband had you too many times last night?"

I shook my head. "No! It's my corset. It's hard to move in gaiyojin clothes." I rolled over onto my side and pushed myself into a kneeling position.

She shouted, drawing looks from the youth practicing in the distance. "Why have you need to concern yourself with gaijin clothes? Do you think you will be wearing anything at all during memory exchange? If I had my way we would be wrestling indoors where it is warm and we would have no need of clothes." She very much looked like a wild woman with her thick hair blowing in the wind and her face contorted in rage.

Nipa cleared his throat. His feet crunched over soft mounds of white. "Tomomi Sensei, I will finish Felicity-san's instructions for the morning. Please entertain your husband." They bowed to each other. She stomped off, muttering to herself.

He lent me a hand to help me up. "Do not be angry with your teacher. She has been given the impossible task of instilling a lifetime of knowledge in you with only a few hours to practice a day for a few days."

I supposed that had to do with the limited amount of time we were expected to stay. Nine more days and she was supposed to teach me all the self-confidence and skills that their warriors possessed.

Nipa said, "Will you permit me to show you ways to get out of holds and locks? I think you will find them less difficult in your gaiyojin attire."

He was gentler than Tomomi. With every move, he showed me by example on himself first. He placed my arms around his waist, pinning his arms to the sides.

"I think I remember you saying you would save your deception for the training field," I said. "Is this how you convince young ladies to embrace you?"

He laughed. "Just so. Now pay attention so you will understand when I do this to you."

If Meriwether had seen us, I was certain he would have fled in vexation. As it was, Nipa and I were both so bundled up, there was no threat of intimacy in the moves. We practiced until I shivered with cold.

He tugged on my long, gold braid and took me in to warm myself before the fire in his personal chamber. In the bright afternoon light I could fully see the size of his room. The hearth was huge compared to the one in my room. He placed a log on the glowing embers.

Crude sculptures made of clay decorated the top of an open cupboard. They looked like animals made by children. I hadn't noticed them in the morning shadows. The mural of the jungle was so much like what I had once experienced, though perhaps more idealized, like my sister's drawings.

He closed the hide curtain to keep the draft out, returning the room to gloom once again. He crouched to stoke the fire. It would have been practical to change out of my petticoats and skirts, but I had no extra dresses to wear and I didn't think I could handle hearing about my lack of proper attire today.

I scooted closer to the fire. Nipa sat beside me and stroked stray strands of hair from my face. The motion was soothing and made me drowsy.

I nodded to the mural. "Did my sister paint your wall?"

"She designed it. She only painted part of it. I asked her to remind me of summer. It is interesting to see how my world looked in her eyes."

I smiled at that. She was always good at seeing details I had missed. "When will I see Faith?"

"When the snow starts to melt and the storm has passed. I imagine a few days. I should show you some of the weavings on the walls of the great hall that she designed for others to weave. We have a larger mural outside as well. I will take you on a tour of the cliff palace and show you all our art. Some of it is left from the time of our founders."

"Tell me about my sister."

I was glad for the cheery chatter, as I was too exhausted to speak. I leaned my head against his shoulder. Drowsiness tugged at my eyes. I yawned.

I opened my eyes, not realizing I'd closed them. I found myself lying under a furry, purple blanket. Nipa still sat staring into the fire, stroking my hair. For all the grappling he and I had done earlier, this simple gesture held far more intimacy. He smiled, seeing me awake and leaned closer.

Being well practiced at ruining romantic moments, I sat up and patted my skirts. The half that had been facing the fire was warm and dry.

"Are you done with your nap? Your not-husband will want you to teach waltzes with him again."

It was too cold to go outside to the children's courtyard, but I didn't want to complain. Large flakes of snow drifted down and the brightness of the world hurt my eyes after the respite indoors. We played with the children and adults who were curious and wished to join in. The captain moved around more easily today and Charbonneau even joined in the games with Meriwether.

We were all shivering with cold by the time Nipa said, "Come. It is time to warm yourselves indoors. My sister will entertain you with more of our simple, savage ways." He winked at me. "Make sure you use those exact words in your translation."

We sat in a small room warmed with an immense fire. I would have liked to dry my skirts by the fire, but I expected I would have to do so after we were done eating at the low table.

A young woman played a wooden flute in the other corner. Sumiko carried in a pot of tea. I was relieved she wore a blue attush, similar to my bedtime robe, under her layers of furs. I hated the idea of the captain ogling her as he had before.

Nipa sat by my side at the low table. Sumiko served us tea and snacks, her hands dancing in the air like nose birds as they fluttered in a ritualistic choreography. Another young woman came in who performed on another musical instrument as we ate.

"How splendid you have such accomplished young ladies," Meriwether said.

"I wish we had a way to play our music for you," I said.

"If only there were a pianoforte for Felicity, she could show you how accomplished our young ladies are as well." Meriwether's adoration shone clearly in his voice.

I should have felt flattered—even if his admiration was unfounded. I had never played for him once.

Charbonneau grumbled. "I suspect it is more than a mere lack of instrument that keeps Miss Earnshaw from playing."

I cringed. I hoped he wasn't going to tell them how I drove away the tutors Lord Klark sent by throwing books at them. I'd only done that during my first two years in my guardian's charge. I supposed I had been something of a wild thing back then. My lack of gratitude that Lord Klark should try to raise me with the same advantages of his own daughters embarrassed me. He could have had me committed to an asylum for some of my behavior, especially after the fit I'd had when the history of the galaxy teacher told me there was no such thing as living Jomon. The only tutor I'd tolerated was the pianoforte teacher because he let me stare out the portal window at the endless expanse of stars while he played.

Meriwether looked from me to his manservant in confusion. "Miss Earnshaw did study music."

"Indeed, and singing and painting. Or your father paid for the tutors to try to teach her anyway." Charbonneau scowled, looking unusually sullen. He must have caught Meriwether's jaw hanging open in dismay. "Excuse me, Master Meriwether. I apologize for speaking so freely. I must be overcome with fatigue after watching all that pebble throwing. I meant no disrespect upon your intended." He scratched at a raw, red rash on his wrist. I would have inquired of his injury, but I was in no mood to be kind after his slight.

Apparently I wasn't the only one to note the way Charbonneau apologized to Meriwether but not to me. Nipa leaned forward. "Why do you let them talk to you this way?"

Now I felt doubly humiliated. "This is the manner of the gaiyojin. Women are expected to be quiet and well-behaved. Already they think I speak out more than I should." Between my mother's independent, American ways and the influence of too much freedom with my mouth as a youth, I was ruined for polite, British society.

Captain Ford slapped Meriwether on the back. "Tis not an important matter how accomplished a lady is if she doesn't have what's important." He winked and laughed at Meriwether's complete dismay.

I didn't want to know what he thought was important.

Nipa nodded to the captain. "This is what I mean. You are like a caged bird, in body and soul. Are women only meant to be a man's object of pleasure? How can you tolerate it?" His voice rose in vehemence. "Why do your women not club these men over their heads?"

"Men are bigger and stronger than most women," I argued. "British scientists claim men's minds are the more intelligent." After all, anyone—even a dim-witted young lady—could play the pianoforte, take up painting, or fill her hours with embroidery, but only men could handle the logic and complex mathematical equations needed for space flight, improve upon laser cannon designs, manage money, and other such "important matters." I wondered if I had lived in the United Worlds of America, would I have been taught otherwise, or was my mother a rarity there as well?

Nipa's voice rose again. "Are there not as many women as men in your world? How is it they do not unite together and prove themselves to these baka? Is this what you live with every day on other worlds? Is this what you look forward to? Why do your women not choose to leave their own worlds and colonize another?"

My blood boiled in my veins. "Mayhap first world colonists people attack all the off-worlders who try to settle on the planets they go to."

Nipa gestured with his hand, spilling his tea across the table. "Or is it that you—"

"Silence!" Sumiko shouted. It was then I noticed Meriwether's wide-eyed stare, the captain's smug smile, and Charbonneau's even grumpier expression.

Sumiko lifted her chin in challenge, though her voice was quiet and cloying. "You will be polite and not insult our guests, big brother. Not every gaiyojin is bad. After taking a foreign bride, you would do well not to insult her people."

Captain Ford cleared his throat. "She's upset them, hasn't she? I knew it would be folly to have a woman translator."

I shook with rage by that point. With the delicate grace of a lady, I lifted my tea cup and splashed it in the captain's face. I picked up my petticoats and left.

Sumiko's voice whispered behind me. "Leave her be."

I walked off my anger, a trick I had learned long ago on the space station. There were servant tunnels, not just in Lord Klark's estate, but for miles through the rest of the station. In some places on the station the gravity was heavy and oppressive compared to Planet 157, though the areas where laborers carried carts and robo-butlers traversed with heavy loads felt closer to what I was used to. Maidservants and space station engineers hugged the other side of the wall as I passed, quite aware of my temper as an American and a reputedly mentally unstable young lady.

I walked without seeing in the cliff palace, slowing as my black mood calmed. I wandered the cliff palace for hours. I didn't know where anything was and the dark hallways were nigh indistinguishable from one another. Eventually, I wanted to sit someplace warm and rest. I peeled back a hide door covering, hoping to find sanctuary in an empty room. Instead I got an eyeful of a man's bare behind as he mounted a woman I presumed to be his wife and she moaned in pleasure. I quickly dropped the skin and backed away. In hindsight, I should have listened for the sound of grunts before entering.

When I built up the courage to try another room, I waited outside for a long moment lest I stumble upon more carnal acts. The room was empty of people. It looked well lived in, with tools, toys, clothes and ornate carvings on shelves. I stole over to the embers, stirred up the coals with a stick and warmed my hands.

One would have thought the space station to be a treat after my time with the Jomon. Lord Klark had generously showered me with gifts and spared no expense on gowns and jewelry. Other young women in my situation without family or home might have become maids or ladies' companions or some other sort of servant. Yet Lord Klark had treated me like another daughter—perhaps better than he treated his own daughters—as they did little to try his patience.

Despite Lord Klark's kindness, I had hated every moment living on the station. True, I hadn't wanted to be on the Jomon world, not after what had happened. But I didn't want to be stuck on a space station where there was neither natural sunlight above, nor earth under my feet. I didn't want to live in a society where I was forced to be laced in corsets every single day and I was constantly chided for almost every word that came out of my mouth. Even if I had escaped to a United Worlds of America colony, I doubted my situation would be much improved.

I had no home, no family, and no real friends. The fact that I had an inheritance was relatively new news, but even so, it mattered little when I had no say over my own money, and Lord Klark was quite adamant that I shouldn't leave his care. Over the years I had written my grandparents several times, hoping they might condescend to meet me, but my mother's elopement with my father had surely tainted their view of me. Just as they had disowned my mother, they apparently had abandoned me as well. I untucked my father's pocket watch from my skirts and smoothed my fingers over the metal exterior.

I was back on Planet 157, feeling no more at home than I had on the space station. I hated the feeling of being caught in the middle, not knowing where I belonged.

The sky grew dark outside the window. My introspection was brought to a close when a young mother walked into the living quarters with her children, gasping when she saw me.

I hurriedly stood and bowed. "I apologize. I was lost and cold."

She bowed, keeping her eyes low. "Please sit. Let me put another log on the fire and I will make you tea." She busied herself with closing the hide curtains over the windows and making tea.

She unrolled a ration of fish jerky and handed it to me. "You missed supper," she said. "You must be hungry."

"Sumimasen," I said, a word that had no exact translation in English but meant, "I'm sorry, thank you and excuse me," all wrapped into one.

She bowed again to me, her tone formal and polite. "Tell me, does Nipa know where you are?"

"Well, um, I don't even know where I am. I just . . . I just needed a break."

She bowed her head again. The children stared openly. One looked about three, the other six. The woman turned the eldest of her children to face the door and pushed him toward it. "Go tell Nipa the star woman is here."

I cleared my throat. "Were they angry with me? For disappearing?"

She set a kettle on a kind of gridiron over the hearth. "They?"

"Sumiko-san and Nipa."

She shook her head. "No. They said nothing of your absence at the mealtime. Only, the star man Nipa looked . . . worried."

Indeed, that would be Meriwether.

She poured me a cup of green tea that smelled of ume blossoms and warm weather. I held the cup in my hands, blowing on it to cool. When she raised an eyebrow, I remembered that blowing on food and drink was considered rude and I stopped.

"If it wouldn't be an imposition, please tell me about the stars," the young woman said.

The three-year-old wandered over and plopped herself in my lap.

"So sorry," the woman said and reached for her child.

"She's fine. I don't mind." I patted the little girl's mess of hair.

Her mother scooped her up anyway. "Please tell your story."

"Well, I live in a kind of palace in the stars. It's as big as the mountains and sits in space in a province that is well traversed as a point of trade. Everywhere in the palace are magic machines that make food hot, or cold, or cook the food and stir it so you don't have to. We have plumbing, electricity, marvelous foods and incredible technology. There are automatons that move like magic, which weave and dye cloth so that we don't have to. We have no chiramantep, but we have a contraption that we made which serves the same purpose to carry us from point to point."

The woman's eyes grew wide. "People do not weave? How sad. I would miss it."

I smiled at that. "There are also many good things. Few people grow ill on the space station, and if a child is born ugly or disfigured, medicine can fix that. There is more than enough food for everyone. Ladies don't have to work or practice fighting with sticks." Yet it seemed I wanted to do these things anyway.

Nipa and another man entered the room, followed by the little boy. From the way the stranger looked at the woman with warmth and the child ran up to him, I assumed he was her husband.

The woman bowed to Nipa. "Will you join us for tea?"

He dipped his head. "I would be honored." He kneeled beside me. "Thank you for keeping my Felicity-chan warm and safe."

He exchanged niceties with the couple. I blew on my tea and sipped it.

One side of Nipa's mouth turned up in a smile as he turned to me. He spoke in English. "I think your not-husband would murder me if I didn't ensure your safe keeping. I might think him a knave, but his one good quality seems to be that he cares about your welfare. He was beside himself with worry."

I set down my empty cup. "I'm sorry. I just needed—"

"Please. Don't apologize. You owe me no explanation. You are allowed free rein of the cliff palace. I told him no one would harm you here." His tone wasn't angry when he spoke of my absence. If anything he sounded sincere. He stood and extended a hand to help me to my feet. The man and woman bowed and Nipa did the same. Remembering myself, I hastily added my own bow. I must have been too tired by that point to remember politeness.

He parted the curtains of the door as he exited and held it to the side as I ducked under. I shivered in the chill of the dark hallway. He tucked my hand under his arm. "Felicity-chan, if any apology is due it is from me. I . . . shouldn't have let my anger carry me away. That is not the quality of a good leader."

"Oh—I, well, thank you, Hoku."

I couldn't see anything in the darkness save cracks of light coming from under the coverings of doors. He stopped. I waited, sensing he was about to say more. Instead he hugged me to him. He held me against his chest and stroked my hair. Even through my corset and layers over it, I felt the warmth of his hand against my back. I relaxed when I realized that was all he meant to do in this less than private hallway.

"I'm sorry," he said again. "I will endeavor not to insult your people."

I nodded. "Apology accepted."

"So formal." He laughed. He held me away from him. His hands on my waist shifted. "Ah, you wear your metal cage, ne?"

His words reminded me of the sensibilities expected of me. I stepped back.

"To your room. You must be hungry." He found my hand and tucked it into the crook of his arm.

No doubt my grumbling belly had given me away.

A bowl of broth waited for me, along with fish cakes and yam noodles. Nipa bowed. "I will take my leave so you may sup. Sumiko-chan should be along shortly."

I bowed. I enjoyed the fish cakes, and the brothy soup was more to my liking than breakfast had been. I supposed the dried ume fruit was meant to be my dessert. I cleaned my teeth with the chewing stick and washed my face while I waited for Sumiko. When she still didn't come, I undressed down to my corset and chemise. I tried to unlace the corset myself but it was impossible. Unfastening the hooks at the front meant the corset had to have enough give to push the clasps closer together before unhooking it. The corset was so snugly laced there was no give. Nonetheless, I still tried.

"Gomen kudasai!" Nipa called out in greeting. He stuck his head through the flap covering the doorway, his mask in place. "My sister is indisposed. She will be—"

I lifted the blanket to cover myself. "Have you ever heard of knocking? I'm undressing. Get out."

He ducked outside. "Sumiko-chan is tending to a sick woman. I thought I would come tell you."

He said no more and I assumed he left, so I didn't respond. I continued trying to push the hooks closer together. Finally I heard from the other side, "Are you done undressing?"

"No. I need Sumiko's help."

"You do realize, I see far more skin on a daily basis than what I just saw of you."

"Yes, well, you haven't seen mine and that's what counts. That, and it isn't proper for a man to see a lady's undergarments." I wanted to cringe when the words came out of my mouth. How I sounded like my prim and proper sister.

"I could help you uncage yourself. As your husband, I should think it not so improper for me to do that."

I continued to try at the hooks. "You are not my husband, at least not that kind of husband. If you want to be useful, fetch Sumiko."

He sighed in obvious frustration. "Cover yourself. I'm coming in."

I snatched up the blanket again and held it to my bosom. He plopped beside me before the fire. "Tell me, why can you not bear the idea that any man should see you in less than neck to ankle attire?"

I swallowed. "Gaiyojin have taboos against provocative dress."

He tilted his head to the side, his eyes regarding me from under his mask. "Have you never broken such taboos? Are you such a highly proper gaiyojin that you have never done as Jomon do?" His gaze swept over my tattooed arms.

I frowned. There had been plenty of times in my life I had acted as a Jomon. I had dressed as they dressed, gotten tattoos, and I observed many of their customs despite how scandalous they were. Some of those customs felt natural to return to. I suspected the possibility that alarmed me at the moment was not so much that a Jomon might see me in my corset, but that I was alone with an attractive man I had willingly kissed—and he might see me.

I swallowed. "If a gaiyojin man saw me in so little clothes, it would be construed as an invitation. It is hard to get over that notion, as I have been living that reality for the last seven years."

He held a hand out to me and I reluctantly took it. "I am sorry gaiyojin men have so little restraint that they turn into isepo in heat every time they see a naked woman. Please do not unjustly lump me into the same place in your mind that you put Ford-san and Charbonny-san?"

I giggled at his mispronunciation. The tension between us dissolved. Perhaps it was the laugh that allowed me to give him admission to stay. "I will allow you to help me take off my corset but that is all you will see. Do you understand?"

I lowered the furs. He reached for the hooks in the front.

I smacked his hands. "No, no, untie the back."

I turned away from him. He unlaced my corset. The relief was immediate and I breathed deeply. He kept on loosening it until I could wiggle around in it. His hands came around my waist to the hooks at my belly.

He managed to unhook a few before I put my hands on his to stop him. "I can do the rest myself." I did so, setting the corset aside.

"Iya! By my ancestor's graves, there is a naked gaiyojin woman before me! She shows as much skin as Tanukijin women in winter." Nipa held his hand over his eyes in feigned shock. "There is too much white skin and white clothes! It has blinded me like sunlight on a plain of snow. I have become insensible. I can no longer be a fit leader." He flung off his headdress in a dramatic gesture and fell onto the blankets.

I couldn't fight the smile tugging at my lips. I poked him in the ribs and his stomach muscles contracted under his robe. He squirmed back from my hand. He covered his eyes and thrust my attush at me. Seeing he made no move to leave, I wrapped it over my chemise.

He sat up and scooted closer. I didn't object when he wrapped my fur blankets around me. He covered his bare feet. "If it does not displease you, I will sit and wait with you until my sister comes."

I nodded.

His smile turned shy. "Will you allow me to put an arm around your shoulder if I promise not to do more?"

It tickled me this was the first he had asked me. "Suddenly you are now the gentleman?"

He dipped his head. "I have been observing your customs and trying my best not to offend you. I do not wish to push you to do more than you are comfortable with."

"You may put your arm around me." I scooted closer. Just saying it made my heart race with excitement. I was engaged, and such behavior was inappropriate for both Americans and British no matter how you looked at it. And yet, I didn't want to refuse him and it had nothing to do with ambassadorship.

He placed an arm around me. "Tell me about Meriwether-san. Does he truly come here in search of red stones or was that a ruse?"

"Indeed, he has. Why wouldn't he?" I leaned against the warmth of his side. It had been years since I'd felt comfortable enough to trust someone to sit this close. I might have with Meriwether if his British etiquette hadn't compelled him to keep me, an unmarried lady, at an arm's length.

"Meriwether-san asks for our garbage. Only children would want such things."

I laced my fingers through his. "It isn't garbage for my people. The stone is quite valuable. And I don't think all Jomon think it's trash. A friend, well, he was a friend at the time, gave one to me. It was a gift, or maybe a trade, I'm not sure."

"Perhaps your friend was playing a trick on you and thinking he got the better bargain."

I laughed at that and shook my head. He rubbed his thumb over my palm. The sensation was like a tickle, only I didn't want it to stop. I was so distracted I had difficulty focusing on Nipa's words. I could only think of the kiss I'd given him the previous night. My gaze rested on his perfectly plump and kissable lips.

Nipa said, "I did not think Meriwether-san was earnest . . . about many things. I did not think his love for you was real. After today, though, I can tell he cares for you. I wonder why you haven't married him yet."

I closed my eyes and listened to the crackle of fire. "I don't want to marry anyone. Most of the time I wish everyone would leave me be. I want to be, well, I don't expect you to understand this, being a—"

"A Jomonjin?" He frowned.

"A stranger." I bumped him with my knee and rolled my eyes before returning to what I had been saying. "I would like to be more like my mother. She was smart and brave and independent. She was a leader of sorts. Only, I don't know how she managed to make men listen to her. I don't know if it was her parents' money, or her confidence, or her United Worlds upbringing." I tilted my head from side to side to stretch my neck.

Nipa kneaded his fingers into the aching muscles in my shoulders. "And you feel you will never live up to the dream of who you imagine she was?"

The sensation of his touch was so pleasant I forgot to answer. He nudged my shoulder.

"Oh, yes. Something like that. I don't think any man I marry could allow such autonomy." It was easy to be open with him. After keeping many of my thoughts secret for so many years, I felt compelled to release my burden. Perhaps because he was Jomon and his customs were less oppressive, or because he was simply not one of the many nobles or servants in Lord Klark's employment, I felt as though I was free to speak my mind. And free of Lord Klark's critical eye.

"I suppose my other reason for not marrying has to do with my memories—or lack of them. I have feelings and vague impressions of horrible things happening. Sometimes I will be in a crowd at the theatre and smell a perfume that reminds me of the flowers of the jungle and I will think I can hear my sister's voice and see . . . something, but it is always out of my grasp. I'd never considered she might be alive because whenever I try to think back, I know something happened to her. There are so many lingering feelings that haunt me, like the almost-memory of dreams upon waking."

"I do not understand how this causes you not to marry Meriwether-san."

"The lack of independence and perchance the bad feelings I have about my past—about my virtue—are why I don't want to marry anyone, but not the reason I haven't married Meriwether. If I am to marry, he is the practical choice. He cares about me and is considerate. He wants to make me happy. I have grown fond of him. But I fear with any man I marry, the affection would be one-sided. It wouldn't be fair to him. Yet Lord Klark is intent I marry before I become even more of an old maid."

Nipa kneeled behind me and rubbed my shoulders more deeply. He found aches I hadn't known were there. It was strange being this close to a man in whom I felt free to confide my secrets. And stranger still that I had believed him when he said he would not do more than what I was comfortable with. It was the trust that he would stop if I asked that made me feel safe enough to allow him to continue.

"And you worry Klark Nipa will be angry if he knows someone has taken your virtue?"

"Oh, I don't know." I wasn't sure if he referred to the present or the past. "Lord Klark certainly knows of my past. Meriwether probably has guessed as much about me. His father wants my money, but he does his best to keep my scandalous past from ruining his son's reputation." I turned to look at him over my shoulder.

He leaned closer, so close I thought he might mean to kiss me, but of course, that was silly since that wasn't a Jomon custom. His eyes intently searched mine. "Is that why you think he wants your past a secret? Out of concern for your reputation?" His breath, smelling of sweet berry tea, whispered against my cheek.

I tilted my chin upward. "What other reason would he have?"

"Do not ask me. You know him better than I."

My heart felt as though it lurched in my chest when I thought about how close his mouth was to mine. There was no denying how much I wanted to taste his lips. The realization filled me with guilt. But not enough guilt to overpower the longing to feel close to someone.

I cleared my throat. "What do you think about . . . what I mean to say is, ahem, last night I kissed you. Do you know what a kiss is? Did it offend you?"

He slipped his arms around me and hugged me to him. "I understand it is how you show affection. I am willing to try your gaiyojin ways." Grinning, he offered me his cheek.

I gave him a quick peck. The chaste gesture didn't at all satisfy the craving to kiss him.
Chapter Twelve

I have but two regrets in my life: not immediately pursuing the love of my life before she made a regrettable and irrevocable mistake, and not bringing greater weapons to Planet 157 when I arrived the first time.

—Lord Klark's private diaries

Upon the morrow, I considered the merit of wearing Jomon clothes. I sat with Nipa eating breakfast in my room in my attush, my gaze flitting back and forth between the two sets of garments folded in the corner. Why bother to pretend to be proper? Tomomi had a point about my need to move freely in practice. On the other hand, I couldn't help wondering if I wore my corset again, would she give up on my training early and I'd be forced to train with Nipa? The notion that I wanted to spend time in his company sent a flush of warmth to my cheeks.

"What ails you?" he asked. "Do you not like the pickled daikon?"

"No, it isn't that. I, um. . . . Are you too busy today to give me more instruction like you did yesterday?" I asked.

"I will never be too busy for my wife." He leaned closer, offering his cheek.

Reluctantly, I kissed him. From his grin, I suspected he was quite pleased with himself. He probably thought this was some deeply meaningful gesture of gaiyojin affection. It was quite vexing. He was almost as clueless as Meriwether—only in a different way.

After breakfast, I dressed in furs, telling myself I would change before dinner. I enjoyed morning exercise with Nipa so thoroughly I forgot to change into my dress when I accompanied him to a council meeting. The tribal elders wore their ritual headdresses of purple and green furs. I was also expected to wear one.

They met in a warm room off the great hall. It was stuffy from the fire, even with the windows letting in the light. I think I hated the headdress as much as I despised my corset, but I said nothing. I sat by Nipa's side, and he translated an occasional word I didn't know.

There was discussion of food sources and places to forage for fresh game and vegetables as the current location where they sought provisions was depleted. I did my best to follow along, but their conversation was quick and the seven elders spoke over each other at times, making it hard for me to understand.

After the first matter had been decided, they moved on to another. They spoke of a young woman who had died during childbirth two days before. The baby was also dead. Although losing her was tragic, the greater problem now was of her three-year-old asking for his mama and not understanding her absence. Her husband would have comforted and cared for the boy had he been able. Unfortunately, he had been part of the scouting party who had encountered Meriwether's party. He was the man who died.

Hearing of his death and the impact was like a blow to the gut.

No one looked at me as they spoke on this matter. The way the elders carefully skirted around how he had been killed and who had shot him was not so much out of respect, but a way of blaming without saying the words. I had observed such conversations in my time on the planet before.

"No one needs another mouth to feed. We should leave the boy out in the snow," one grandmother said.

The grandfather to her right said, "There is the mother's mother. She would care for the child."

"How can she do that when she cannot care for herself? If only Kimiko's sister would take the baby. But she is still angry Kimiko won Hideki's love, not her."

"We should ask her again. She may change her mind if she knows there is no other option."

I shifted from kneeling to sitting cross-legged and back again. I pressed my hands to the pocket watch ticking under my clothes, tapping with every second I sat in silence. When four out of the seven elders agreed to infanticide, I shook my head and frowned. My heavy headdress shifted forward and I pushed it back so I could see.

Nipa leaned close to my ear. "You are permitted to speak at this meeting as my wife. Have you something you would like to say?"

I nodded. He held up his hand and the elders' voices trickled out. All eyes turned to him. As much as I hated how my words were not heeded at all on the spaceship or space station, it was unnerving to be given such attention now.

"I, well, that is. . . . Is there no woman in the village who might want a child, but cannot have one?"

They shook their heads. "The women have been asked."

"Or, if not a woman, a man?" I asked.

"Ayumu," one of the grandmothers said. "He lost both wife and children from the fever last year. He has been lonely and no longer has purpose."

"Can he not be given the boy to raise?"

Nipa bowed to me. "My clever wife," he said. He laced his fingers through mine. "The next problem on our list: I am told one of the gaiyojin avoids the onsen and doesn't bathe. How can we solve this problem of modesty and shyness?" His lips curled up into a mischievous smile.

I'm sure the flush of my face was visible in the muted light. "Perhaps she should be permitted to bathe at night when no one is present so she will not feel so embarrassed."

"Or perhaps she should be accompanied by her husband to ensure she scrubs herself properly. No?" He winked.

The elders laughed at this. I would not allow him to have the last word and for them to see me as the less clever. I ran a finger from his ear to hairline where the raccoon dog headdress obscured his neck. I examined my finger and scrunched up my nose as if in disgust. "I think it is more likely the husband needs a wife to teach him how to properly clean himself."

The elders slapped their knees and rocked back and forth with laughter.

"She is too smart for you!" said a grandfather.

A grandmother smacked my shoulder. "This clever one will be pulling the tanuki hide over your eyes! Watch her." From her toothless smile and thick accent, I suspected she was Grandmother Ami, the same old woman who found Meriwether to be so diverting in his stories.

Nipa wrapped an arm around me and pulled me closer to his side. The liquid black of his eyes danced with merriment as he stared into mine. If he hadn't been Jomon I would have assumed he'd try to kiss me, even with people watching. The warmth of his breath tickled against my cheek. A shiver of wanting opened up inside me and I did my best to ignore it.

"I don't mind having a clever wife. If anything, I should at least get a bath with you out of this."

In the afternoon we joined in soup making in the kitchen. Nipa and I chopped roots alongside others. "Each day we take turns with some of the less pleasant duties. Even leaders and elders must clean privies and cook when it is their turn," Nipa explained.

Though I hated the idea there were no maids to clean privies, I didn't think it was such a bad idea for everyone to share in unpleasant chores. I had helped with ship chores as a child and village chores in the years after. Only in recent times while living with Lord Klark, did I feel like I had no purpose and nothing to do, with maids and machines doing it all for me instead.

When the first batch of soup was ready, he bundled me up in furs and we brought supper to the men guarding the cliffs. My tanuki headdress was warm, though too big, and kept slipping over my eyes as we ascended a winding path. The sharpened bone attached to my fur-lined boots helped my feet dig into the slush and ice on the slope. Melting ice splattered from rocks above and made the path even slicker.

"The snow is melting. Will it be gone soon?" I asked.

"It comes and goes. We will likely have a few clear days," he said.

"Have you sent for my sister yet?"

"She knows of your arrival. She will come to you when she is ready, but I cannot force her to see you."

That stopped me in my tracks. I set down the shoulder yoke, careful not to spill the covered buckets of soup. "What do you mean, you can't force her to see me? Why wouldn't my sister want to see me?"

He kept walking under the weight of his heavier yoke. "You will have to ask her. It is not my business."

Why would my sister not want to see me? Did she blame me for leaving her? Was she ashamed of something she'd done? I considered the inklings of almost memories I sometimes thought I recalled. When I thought back to that void, sometimes I felt shame when it came to my sister. This unsettled me.

"The reason she doesn't want to see me . . . it has something to do with her child?" I asked. "People refuse to tell me about her because of something pertaining to this?"

He continued up the slope.

"I want to know what happened between Faith and me." I picked up my yoke and hastened my speed. "I need to remember. Must I go through training with Tomomi Sensei each day? I need to learn to get over my fears faster."

"That's up to you, not me."

I groaned in exasperation. I hated to admit he was right. I was the one not willing to perform memory exchange, not he. Tsuma no kokan was for a fortnight and already I had already squandered days avoiding memory exchange. What would happen when it came to an end and I still didn't have my memories back?

Halfway up, Nipa set his shoulder yoke of soup down and turned me to see whence we had come. The palace was made of compartment-like boxes carved out of the stone cliffs. The way it was nestled below the overhang protected it from the majority of the falling snow. It was so different from the jungle palace of the Chiramantepjin with their huts hidden in tree boughs, but no less beautiful.

"Your people made this?" I asked.

"Tanukijin ancestors did. We're lucky these cliffs were overlooked by the starships."

When we reached the top of the mesa and delivered the meals to the sentries, I could see how well-hidden the cliff dwellings were. The Isepojin had lived underground in caverns. The Chiramantepjin hid in houses that blended into the jungle. I suspected I saw a theme in the dwellings of the Jomon tribes. These people worked to stay hidden. Perhaps it was a fear of outsiders as the guidebook had suggested.

My mind was cluttered with thoughts on the return to the cliff palace. I considered how reclusive the Jomon were and why that would be so, why my sister had become a recluse as well, and what people were hiding from me.

Once inside the great hall, I shed layers of fur. Low tables had been brought out from their resting places along the walls. Dinner was served in shifts. We put away our outdoor gear and waited for the second seating to join the diners, weaving over to Sumiko and the rest of my party at the head of the room.

When Meriwether saw me, he leapt to his feet and extended his arms to hug me. His gaze slid over to Nipa. He didn't bark out his displeasure for once. Meriwether embraced me until I stepped back. It wasn't that I was so proper as to avoid public displays of affection, but I didn't want to demonstrate my feelings here amidst a crowd of Jomon. At least, that was the reason I told myself.

No one made mention of my lack of propriety and unladylike clothing. Captain Ford's eyes were bloodshot and his breath smelled of strong drink. Again. Charbonneau scratched at his wrist and absently watched the diners.

"Are they keeping you busy, captain?" I asked.

"Aye. We spent the day assisting with the process of fermenting tubers into ale. And there were quite a few samples along the way."

"How diverting!" Meriwether said, sounding in good spirits, though I doubted his day had been as favorable. I'd been told Tomomi had made him assist her in cleaning duties. He didn't look like someone who'd spent a day in drudgery.

I leaned closer. "What were you up to today?"

"Oh, nothing of importance. Entertaining children with my stories. A little cleaning." He blushed.

I'd known Meriwether long enough to pick out a lie. I tried not to laugh. "Spending time with Sumiko?"

He shook his head. "I would never—not in that sense—we were chaperoned."

"Has she been dancing for you again?" I teased.

"No!"

Sumiko looked my way from where she sat on the other side of her brother and smiled. No wonder he hadn't come out to watch me practice. He'd found his own diversions. We were engaged and I should have felt jealous that she'd caught his eye, but I could only manage to feel a sisterly pride that he was making friends and charming someone who might appreciate him.

Charbonneau set down his bowl. "Tomorrow we are to go on a tour. At least I think that's what they said."

Captain Ford lowered his voice and leaned in. "It will be a capital opportunity to look for mines."

I glanced at Nipa. He acted as though he hadn't heard.

"Felicity dear, ask if I can go on the tour," Meriwether said. "My wife told me I couldn't."

"Are you talking about Sumiko or Tomomi?" I asked. "Neither are your wife."

Meriwether's ears flushed red. "Well, he isn't your husband either. Not by our standards. Just ask him if I can go."

I made a show of translating, though I knew perfectly well Nipa understood.

He stroked his chin as if thinking it over. "Tell him it will be a hardship for him to be separated from his wife for so long."

I frowned. "I cannot abide your cruelty to him. Permit him a break from his supposed husbandly duties."

He leaned back, his pose cocky and self-assured. "If it means so much to you, I will barter with you. What will you give me in exchange for this favor?"

"Let's start with me not punching you in the nose. That, and you will have my gratitude."

He gave a hearty laugh that drew stares from all around. "If his happiness means that much to you, I will permit this." He nodded to Meriwether

Meriwether immediately looked to me. "He agreed I could go? Will you—"

Nipa dismissed him with a wave of the hand. "Yes, yes, tell him you will all go."

"Why do you not tell him yourself? You can speak English."

Nipa cleared his throat and spoke in a heavy, almost indiscernible accent that revealed nothing of his true ability. "Meliwezer come tour."

Meriwether nodded in enthusiasm.

"Wife no touch," Nipa said. He placed an arm around me and hugged me against his side.

I pushed him away. "You're incorrigible."

"Not as much I plan to be later," he said with a wink.

After I was given time to myself in my room to rest and change, to meditate with Tomomi and mostly be bored, Sumiko came to fetch me. "Your husband wishes your presence."

I followed her, passing his room, climbing up one set of steps and down another. The route was familiar enough that I suspected where she headed.

I groaned when she pulled back the curtain of furs hanging across the door. A wave of warm vapors rolled over me. The flickers from a torch danced behind the thick mist.

She shooed me into the room. "You need not be shy. The women do not come this late."

I whispered, "He's in there, isn't he?"

She pursed her lips, the first sign of vexation I had seen from her. "You are married, no? It is normal for a married couple to bathe each other. Go wash yourself and then sit in the pool." She let the flap of the noren screen drop between us.

I considered sitting in the steam out of spite. It wasn't that I didn't want to bathe. I just didn't want to bathe with an audience. I fumbled through the vapors until I walked into a stool with a washcloth on it. I scrubbed my body before feeling my way over to the pool. I could barely see a foot in front of me, so I at least felt assured the mist afforded some modesty.

After I had climbed in, I found one of the carved stone seats and sat.

A splash of water sounded across from me. Either he was getting in or coming closer. I couldn't tell in the steam.

"Are you ready for me to sit with you?" Nipa asked.

"It depends. Are you only going to sit? Or do you intend to ogle?"

"You are so funny, Felicity-chan." He used a less formal honorific to address me. "I do not know whether to be insulted by your suspicions or laugh." He waded through the water toward me, the level coming to his waist. Thank goodness his brawny chest was all I saw. I diverted my gaze from his muscular frame. I didn't know what was worse, the impropriety that I had seen it or that I had found it so aesthetically pleasing.

He sat beside me on the stone bench. He patted my shoulder and then my arm, which he took up and scrubbed.

"I've already cleaned myself," I said.

"Not well enough."

"Ugh, you're doing this because of what I said earlier. You want to embarrass me and this is your revenge."

"Not at all. I am performing my husbandly duties—just as Meriwether Nipa did earlier today for his wife."

The image of that made me laugh. Then I stopped when I remembered Meriwether's mixture of happiness and embarrassment. "Wait, you mean he and Sumiko bathed, don't you? Not he and Tomomi."

Nipa stopped laughing now. "What? My sister? With him? I hope not."

Nipa rubbed the cloth across my arms and I turned away for him to clean my back. In the gray swirls of mist I couldn't make much out other than his dark eyes and elegantly sloped nose. I trusted that he wasn't going to see much if I could barely see him.

He rubbed the cloth over my belly, but I placed my hand on his when the cloth ventured higher. "I would like to do the rest." In truth, it felt too pleasurable to let him do more. This act may not have meant anything to him, but that didn't mean it had no meaning to me.

He dropped the cloth into my hand. "I am sorry you distrust."

Was it distrust? Was this what prevented me from allowing him to revive my memories? I distrusted myself more than anything, perhaps.

He said nothing more. The quiet was peaceful after so much noise earlier. After scrubbing, I tried to hand the cloth back to him, but he shook his head.

"Now it is my turn to be cleaned, no?"

I snorted. "Indeed, something you've been waiting for all day."

I dragged the cloth over his back, feeling the powerful muscles under my fingers. There was no doubt he was physically formidable. I should have averted my eyes but I found myself squinting at the contours of his frame, curious and oddly awakened by such a sight.

His stomach muscles bunched and contracted as I brought the cloth around to his chest. I paused, wondering if I had aroused him. I had no idea what he'd do if I had. Or perhaps the problem was I had no idea what I'd do. It then occurred to me as he snorted and pushed my hand away he was ticklish. I scrubbed his chest, pausing to wiggle my fingers against his side. He barked out a laugh and then cleared his throat.

"I see you're human after all," I said. "You do have a weakness."

"Yes, but only one."

I moved on to his legs, working my way to his knee and foot. He jerked back when I tickled the arch.

"Ahem," he said. "I notice you skipped the most important parts."

I threw the rag at him, laughing when it flopped flat across his face and stayed there for a long moment before sinking into the water. "I think you mean the dirtiest parts. You can take care of your chin-chin."

He felt around for the cloth and finished washing himself. "That's the children's word. You must learn the adult words for man-sized parts."

"No, I'm pretty sure I don't need to learn those." I hoped to convey the sentiment that I doubted he was big enough for adult-sized words. If he couldn't see my expression, my tone would communicate my meaning.

"You wound me. If I hadn't promised to not offend your virtue, I would gladly prove to you how man-sized these parts can be."

I snorted. "You are what my people call a flirt. Do you know what that is? It's a man who likes to tease many women with words of romantic promises."

He reached behind me and dropped the cloth on the stone wall. "Does a flirt keep his promises?"

"I don't know. I avoid flirts."

"That is probably for the best. I think a flirt might break hearts." He circled an arm around me and scooped me onto his lap. The water came to his neck and just below my collar bone. My first instinct was to slide off his lap and retreat, but he kept his arms firmly around my waist.

"Sit here with me like this for a moment. I have given up the mental pleasures of memory exchange and physical pleasure of husbandly duties, but I would like to keep the companionship and joy you bring me. It has been a long time since I had a wife, permanent or temporary." He loosened his hold on me so that his hand rested gently on my side. It would be easy to move away now. Certainly, that was what propriety demanded. Yet I felt no threat by the gesture as I would have with most others. Thus far, Nipa had been forthcoming with me.

If anything, I thought I was the one far more likely to be tempted by this intimate gesture.

"You will permit me to refuse you?" I asked.

"Are you asking about sitting on my lap or something else? The answer to either question is yes." He removed his hands from my waist. He leaned back against the stone and closed his eyes.

I resisted the part of me that wanted to move away. I made myself focus on this moment and the warmth of the water. There was a comfort in being close to another human being again. Even Meriwether, with all his doting, rarely touched more than my hand or elbow, as if he was convinced I would break. I doubted he would ever take a bath with me even after we were married. The notion disappointed me. Again, I couldn't imagine how we would marry.

The torch flickered and dimmed.

"Perhaps you would consider meeting my daughter in a few days," Nipa said.

The suddenness of his question surprised me as much as the fact that he had a child. "Yes, I would be honored. How old is she?"

"Fourteen."

He was older than I'd realized if he had a teenage daughter. I tried to find the definition of age on his visage but it was too dark.

We were silent for a time. I shifted, trying to subtly scoot to the edge of his knees. "Why haven't you taken another wife? A headman like you, and one who knows how to flirt, surely would be approached by women."

He laughed. "You are so full of funny words. Yes, my position affords me many women who are interested. But no woman can bring me the joy my wife once did, so I have waited." After a moment he sighed melodramatically. "That and I find it better to be free of a wife and simply perform wife-swap with every man who has a pretty wife who wanders this way."

I elbowed him. "I hope that's a joke."

"The first half about the wife-swap is. Not the part about you being pretty." He turned his face away, his smile embarrassed.

For all his clever jokes, I wondered if he was covering for shyness. Or if he was shy around women. Meriwether was like that, though in a much more bumbling way.

I slid toward the edge of his knees, but he scooped me closer again. "Stop squirming or else you will make my chin-chin man size."

I shook my head at his joke. His arms holding me close were more comforting than constraining. He rested his jaw against my shoulder. I closed my eyes, focusing on relaxing tension in my muscles. After a time, I wiped away the sweat building up on my forehead where it threatened to drip into my eyes. I don't know how long I sat, but I realized I had dozed when my head nodded forward and I jerked upright. I was unused to so much physical activity during the day, and it made me tired.

"You are sleepy. It's time for me to take you back to your room. I will wait as you dress yourself." He held my elbow as I stood. I turned his chin away to look toward the wall. I appreciated the way he stayed looking that direction.

My muscles were languid and my body relaxed as I climbed out of the tub. I was so warm, the slight chill felt nice. I dried myself and dressed in the blue attush. "I will wait at the door," I said.

The hall was cold and drafty. Goosebumps rose on my skin and I wrapped my arms around myself.

When Nipa lifted the flap of hide to come out, a waft of warm air caressed my skin. I leaned in, savoring that bit of heat. He nearly collided with me coming out and laughed as he caught me from stumbling back.

He placed my hand on his shoulder. "I think it's best for you to follow me. I will walk slowly."

I followed him down hallways, up a set of stairs and down another set. The stone floor froze my feet, the cold sinking into my bones. In my room a fire blazed in the hearth. By that point my teeth chattered from the cold.

It took but a moment to realize the lumpy shape on the floor before the hearth wasn't my bedroll and blankets. Sumiko lay asleep next to my bed.

Nipa walked me to my blanket. "I will—what do you gaiyojin call it?—tuck you in," he said.

I might ordinarily have refused, but I couldn't imagine he would try anything now, after all the time we'd spent in the onsen—especially considering his sister slept in the room.

I slipped under the warm furs. He swaddled the blanket around my feet and tucked it around my shoulders. I was relieved he didn't grope—or pretend to accidentally grope like the old aristocrats at balls. I had long ago learned the hard way that an elbow to the face of an overly friendly dignitary was far more effective than a slap.

Lord Klark had been beside himself with humiliation over what I'd done to his guest's nose. His disappointed response had shamed me more than his lecherous guest's.

Nipa cupped my face in his hands and looked very much like he would lean forward and kiss me. Instead he patted my head like I was a chiramantep.

I giggled and he did too. His smile was so warm and genuine, it was hard not to like him. Sumiko rolled over in her sleep.

He offered me his cheek. I turned his head so that his mouth was in front of me. He didn't move away when I pressed my lips to his.

"I must be careful not to allow you to eat my flesh," he whispered with a wink. "What will my people think if I have a cannibal for a wife?"

Without another word he left. I snuggled into my blankets, a smile on my face. It occurred to me I might not just be learning how to trust, but to feel desire.
Chapter Thirteen

The guidebook never said anything about the planet being filthy, about the mortality rate of women in childbirth, the lack of technology after they'd come all this way with their great spaceships, and how every day the work would be grueling in order to survive.

—Faith Earnshaw's private diaries

During our tour of the carved cliff palace the following afternoon, our party viewed various homes and the uses of different rooms. People stopped weaving, tanning hides, or preserving food to bow to us. In some rooms all I could smell was the overpowering stench of fish. Meriwether held a handkerchief over his mouth and nose. Children followed us, peeking around corners and watching.

"I will now take you to my greatest treasure," Nipa said.

Captain Ford elbowed Meriwether. I, too, wondered if Nipa was about to show us a mountain of red diamonds. The only gaijin who had known where to find them had been my father, and he had taken that secret to the grave.

We entered a partially sheltered courtyard with a pool of bubbling water. Steam rose from the ground and the temperature became more comfortably warm. Although we were outside, there was no snow. Jungle plants grew in the garden. A bench overlooked a large basin of sand with intricate patterns drawn within. On the dark gray rock of the wall were painted white spirals and designs.

Nipa nodded to the art. "Faith-san painted this."

Why did her very name fill my heart with sorrow? Was it the idea she might not want to see me? When I tried to slip into my memories, or reflections that were left, I only knew there was dread associated with my sister.

Moss grew on the walls and up the sides of a stone bench. I sat, admiring the serene beauty. "I wouldn't mind coming to this place more." How I wished time would slow and I could stay here forever. I held my hand to my fur tunic, pressing the tick-tick-ticking of the watch into my belly where it reminded me that time never stopped for me, nor anyone else.

Meriwether studied a tree heavy with winter berries, humming to himself. The song was vaguely familiar, maybe something my mother had once sung.

Nipa passed a stunted tree barren of leaves. A little stream from the bubbling pool meandered past the tree and shrine, disappearing into a hole under the mossy wall. Nestled in a shrine stood a giant raccoon dog statue carved from wood. The animal's tongue lolled out of his mouth and his stomach was so round, he appeared to be pregnant. It was simultaneously cute and frightening.

"This is a symbol of my province and clan. He represents virility and strength. This is a sacred place and a treasure to my people," Nipa said. I translated.

Charbonneau huffed in obvious disappointment.

"Why does his tail drag on the ground like that?" Meriwether asked.

The captain smacked him on the back. "That's no tail, lad."

I immediately turned away to study the ripening berries on a branch of bush, pretending I hadn't heard to lessen the sting of his embarrassment.

Meriwether continued staring for several more seconds. "Oh, I see." He looked to me. "This is a rather inappropriate sight for a young lady's eyes, wouldn't you say?"

I shrugged. "If you think this is . . . exaggerated, you should see tanuki during mating season."

His eyes widened and he shook his head as if to clear the image. For someone who studied medicine as a hobby, he remained embarrassingly unaware of sexual anatomy.

We saw the distillation room next, and then the kitchens. There were three different bath houses and a place they did laundry. Rooms had been built around areas the hot springs naturally emptied into. Green moss grew on the walls of the humid rooms.

I brushed my finger over a patch. The slight tingle told me what it was. Nipa watched, a smile tugging at his shapely lips. When he took up my hand in his, he rubbed a thumb against the side of my palm. My breath hitched in my chest. A shiver skated up my arm. He did it again. This time the caress sent goosebumps across my flesh. An ache built in my core. The sensation was somewhere between arousing and a tickle. I considered tugging my hand away. Letting him continue would send the wrong message.

Even so, I didn't want him to stop. When Meriwether's attention was diverted by children in one of the rooms, Nipa brushed my hand against the stubble on his cheek. I sighed at the pleasure of it. If I hadn't caught myself I might have giggled. I glanced at Meriwether, knowing he would ask what we were doing if we continued on in this way.

The thrill of being improper, and the danger of being caught, enticed me to continue. I swiped at a patch of moss and rubbed it on Nipa's hand. It was hard not to laugh at his attempt to keep his voice controlled and face neutral as he spoke during our tour.

He pointed down a corridor. His voice grew husky. "To my next greatest treasure."

We descended down a flight of steps, passing a room with the chatter of women coming from within.

I paused at the hide covering the door. "What is this room?"

Nipa grinned. "Tell the men it is where I keep my greatest treasure."

I did so, fighting a smile as I noted the gleam in the captain's eyes. He hobbled closer toward the flap of the fur noren curtain, listening.

"Inform him that he mustn't go in there. Meriwether's wife will surely be undressing and he doesn't want to make her cross—or aroused."

Meriwether looked up, hearing his name. "What did he say?"

He blanched when I told him. "My Jomon wife is his greatest treasure? Miss Tomomi?"

"I'm more curious if this holds another shrine of a giant raccoon dog with genitalia dragging on the floor," I said.

Charbonneau looked to me sharply. I realized after I'd said it that I hadn't spoken in Jomon. Blast!

Nipa beckoned for us to follow, but the captain still lingered. Nipa nodded to Captain Ford. "Tell them the room is off limits. It is the private chamber of my many wives."

I laughed at the ridiculousness of the idea.

Meriwether glanced back in horror after I'd explained. "Truly? The Jomon take more than one wife."

The captain cackled. "He has yours right now."

"Just how many wives do you have?" I asked in Jomon.

He lowered his voice, though he spoke in his own tongue. "Only a geari wife. A woman I care for as though she were one of my household. It is out of duty, since she is unfit to marry. My geari wife is a very sad woman and she does not often leave her chamber. That is where she resides."

"Will you introduce me to her?"

"Not today. We have other plans."

"Why are you socially obligated to this woman?" I asked.

Nipa tucked my hand into the crook of his elbow. "You tell me why one might have a geari husband."

I had a sense he was asking something greater than he let on. If he meant to imply Meriwether, the notion was ridiculous. "I suppose a woman might be obligated to a man if he has done something for her—a debt that cannot be repaid. If he has rescued her from disaster, loaned her family money, saved her virtue or done any other number of noble deeds. Has this woman done something that makes you indebted to her?"

"Has Meriwether done something to make you indebted to him?"

"Felicity dear, what's he saying?" Meriwether asked.

I crossed my arms. "Is that what you think? I might love him for all you know."

"Yes, you might. But it is hard to grow fond of someone who embarrasses you and whom you think so little of. No man ever wants to marry a geari wife because he will resent her more and more with time. It is lucky on the rare occasion that he grows to love her, ne?"

I hated that he could see me so clearly. I kicked at the stone wall, growling in pain when I stubbed my toe.

"Felicity dear, what did he say?" Meriwether asked. "I heard him say my name."

"Never you mind. He's just being vexing."

Nearly everywhere we went, Nipa hinted that each place contained his greatest treasure. It was in the chiramantep stables that he said, "This is where you will find my greatest garbage and perhaps what has given me the greatest sorrows." He bid us to stay on the dry earth where we wouldn't get dirty while he trudged outside through smelly slush. He kept his gaze on the ground, toeing the earth every so often until he found what he was looking for. He picked up a brown stone. When he wiped the brown sludge off it, I noticed the way it sparkled red in the sunlight.

"Capital!" said Captain Ford.

The captain and Charbonneau practically pushed each other out of the way to get to it. When Captain Ford reached him first, Nipa tossed it back over his shoulder into the piles of chiramantep droppings and mud with a wet plop.

Meriwether studied the stable. "However did a precious stone get here of all places?"

"Let's see if they figure it out. I will wash for lunch." Nipa offered me his arm. "Tell them they may stay down here if they wish." From the knowing smile on his face, he was aware they would be there for a while.

After supper and my lessons in meditation with Tomomi, I sat in front of the fire in the quiet of my room, considering the events of the day. I didn't understand why there would be precious stones in the mud near the stables. It surely had to be some kind of ploy. Even so, Captain Ford and Charbonneau collected enough to fill their pockets. And what smelly pockets they now were. Meriwether at least had the good sense to wash, as he didn't smell nearly as bad.

"I will allow them to search my grounds tomorrow if it pleases them," Nipa said.

They might not have found a mine, but part of their purpose for coming to the planet had been fulfilled. I wished I could say the same for myself.

Nipa sat down beside me dressed in his evening robe. "Shall I serve us tea before bed? Or would you like to try your first lesson in memory exchange?"

I watched the way the flickers of the flames cast shadows across his face so that it was never still. "Tell me how you plan to help me get my memories back."

"I think you misunderstand me." He shifted from kneeling to sitting cross-legged. "I believe I told you I would help you with your problem. It is possible some of your memories are not completely lost. Or perhaps you need memories to fill the void where old ones once were. Regardless of this, what you need most is to learn to trust so you can accept memories. You will not be able to receive any memories—your own or anyone else's—if you don't learn to master your fear of memory exchange."

"Sumiko said Taishi is dead. So how can I get my memories back?"

His eyes narrowed. "Are you certain my sister said that?"

"She said he's a ghost."

He nodded. "That isn't the same. A ghost lives on, but is changed from before. The man who has your memories will return them. Willingly. But first you must practice memory exchange."

My heart skipped a beat. "Taishi is alive? And you know he has my memories? Why isn't he here?" He dipped his head down in a nod but made no reply. I went on. "Is he with my sister?"

"He has kept her safe. If you can wait two or three days, all this will be explained. You are my wife and I wish to please you, but I have known your sister far longer. She made me give an oath that I would not insist she see you until she's ready. I promised I wouldn't speak of her secrets. Can you understand the position you put me in when you ask me questions about matters that aren't my place to share?"

There were many things I didn't understand, but I could understand that. I nodded.

"I ask that you permit me to do the one thing I can do for you. I can prepare you for memory exchange. Will you allow me to do this?"

I swallowed. "You're going to ask me to give you my memories, aren't you?"

He shook his head. "No, we will find a different way." He stood and offered me his hand. "Shall I show you my greatest treasure?"

I crossed my arms. "I suspect that might be a euphemism."

"Ah, my clever wife defeats me with her words again. No, I will show you something that is treasured by all my people—not just by my many wives."

He led me in the dark through the twisting corridors without faltering once. When we came to a wooden door that opened to the outside and my exposed skin was greeted with cool air, I knew where we were. The air turned warm again as we entered the courtyard. My feet crunched over leaves in time with the bubbling music of the hot spring. I gazed upward and admired stars peeking out past patches of clouds. One of the moons was visible as the clouds shifted. Although this place was surely serene, I didn't see what made it a great treasure. He headed toward the statue.

"Why have you brought me here? And what does this garden have to do with memory exchange?" Surely it wasn't to show me the virility of the tanuki carving again.

He chuckled. "We are not there yet." With his hand on my elbow, he guided me past the shadowy impression of the garden, the bent tree and dark mass of the tanuki statue. "Did you notice what grew here?"

"Fruit trees and moss."

He opened a plant-covered gate and led me to the other side. "Yes, what kind of moss?"

The only moss that I knew the name of was what Taishi had taken me to experience in the forest. "Memory moss."

"Do you understand how memory moss works? How we apply it?"

The trickle of water sounded nearby. "You grind it up and rub it on the body of the person you want to give memories to?"

"More or less. Fresh moss is the most potent. When the herbs are green and juicy, the oils in the tiny leaves release when they contact skin. Fresh moss can help youth overcome fear. Old grandmothers whisper that young lovers should always have each other's memories for the first time in a grove of moss. Special occasions should use fresh moss if one can find it. Painful memories should only use dried moss, otherwise it would be too intense."

He sat me down on a moss-covered bench. "We will bathe here and open our pores before we use the fresh moss."

I could see little in the darkness aside from the stars above. The air smelled of blooming flowers and minerals from the hot springs. From the rustle of clothes, I guessed he was undressing. I stood, fumbling with the ties of the robe. I left it on the bench and tentatively stepped forward.

My outstretched arm brushed against his naked flesh. He found my hand and placed it on his shoulder to guide me as I shuffled forward. He kept a hand on my forearm as I eased into the water. Unlike the smooth, carved stone in the indoor onsen, this one was made up of many large rocks to form a bench. I scooted around until I found an area that wasn't too lumpy and angular to sit on. He sat beside me, his thigh pressed against mine.

Be in the present, I reminded myself. Stop thinking about Taishi and my sister. Taishi with my sister. Could that be her secret? The idea of her with him instead of me sent a flare of jealously through my heart. How odd that the idea of Meriwether and Sumiko, the man I was engaged to, hadn't inspired possessiveness, yet a man I hadn't seen in seven years could.

Nipa hooked an arm around me and brought me closer. "Comfortable?"

"Yes." Be in the moment, I told myself. If I could get this memory exchange practice out of the way, I would be able to move on with my life and become complete again.

I rested my head against his shoulder and inhaled the fresh fragrance of citrus-mint from the memory moss and spicy-sweet flowers in the night air. My eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness. The silhouettes of blossoming trees and bushes heavy with fruit became more obvious.

Heat Heat rose up in my face and soon I was sweating.

"Are you going to take me to a different place to bathe each night?" I teased.

"I'd let you have your way with me in the laundry room tomorrow, but I don't think those cleaning the next day would approve."

I poked him in the ribs where I suspected his ticklish spot was and he squirmed away and chuckled.

After we'd sat in silence for a time, he asked, "Have you relaxed enough? Will you have my memories now?"

The mere mention of memory exchange made my body tense with panic. "I will try."

He took me by the hand, guiding me to the shallow side of the pool where we climbed out. The chill of the air prickled against the water on my skin. My feet padded over rocks and cushions of moss. The fragrance of mint grew stronger. Blindly, I edged forward.

He touched my arm. "Sit here."

I crouched down, patting the spongy tendrils as I determined how large of a space there was on the ground. There was enough room for two to recline in comfort. I sat and attempted to calm my speeding heart. I consoled myself with the fact that this act would not hurt me. I would lose no virtue and he wouldn't take anything from me. This would help me accept memories.

He sat beside me and patted my damp hair with a cloth. It looked like he had come prepared on that account. Despite the warmth of the humid air, I felt chilled. Still, I understood the need for being wet. The way moss interacted with water had been explained to me in the past.

Nipa rubbed his hands up and down the moss near me. "Where will you have me touch you?"

I considered the merits of various places on my body. On my back I would feel too exposed and on my belly I would feel vulnerable.

"May I have a towel to cover myself?"

He handed me a dry cloth. I rolled onto my belly and tucked the fabric around my hips and legs. As I laid across the moss, my body pressed into the tickle of plants, I was reminded of my first time performing memory exchange. I pushed the thought away and returned my mind to the present before my heart grew sad.

Nipa placed his hands on my back below the shoulder blades. "You are probably aware it is considered impolite to take a memory without giving back. In your case, you have had much taken from you. I will give you a gift of my memory and not ask you to give me a memory in return." He smoothed his palms over my shoulders and down my back. I tensed in anticipation. For all I knew, he'd set me up out here in order to grope me and push my legs apart to have his way with me. How I even knew of such things led me to believe I might not be the virtuous young lady I told myself I was.

Despite these fears surfacing to my mind, I doubted they were well-founded. If there was a man I could trust, it would be him.

I forced myself to concentrate on my senses as Tomomi Sensei had instructed. His fingers massaged my muscles. Where the plant oils touched droplets of water, my flesh buzzed with an electric charge.

Warmth spread from his palms over my skin. I closed my eyes and sank into the black void. I was suddenly aware of sunlight shining through a canopy of giant leaves, casting the world in brilliant light and colors too vivid to be real. Nose birds yipped through the trees and tree snails chattered above my head. The jungle smelled of wet wood after rain and fragrant flowers. I held a red fruit speckled with seeds. I peeled back the tough skin with my teeth, spitting out the bitter seeds from the exterior when they fell into my mouth. I lapped up the sweet juices of the inside with my tongue. The word "sugar fruit" came to mind. I bit into the tender flesh, a flavor in between cherries and pineapple bursting on my tongue. The fruit quenched my thirst and settled the rumble of hunger in my belly.

The memory was so fresh and alive it felt as though I was experiencing it in that moment. The image faded and I blinked my eyes open. My body felt languid and serene. My arms and breasts tingled where they remained in contact with the memory moss.

Nipa leaned close to my ear. "Part of me is in you now. You know what I know." Warmth radiated off his body and I yearned for him to lean closer. Jomon politeness dictated I responded with a nicety I had once learned, but I could no longer remember what it was.

I still tasted the tangy, sweet juice on my lips. "You no longer have any trace of that memory?"

He used my robe to cover my upper body, shielding me from the chill. "Correct. But it matters little. I have eaten sugar fruit many times. I have other memories that are similar." He swept my hair out of my face and positioned it on the other side of my neck.

"What if I should be given the only memory you have of something? You would be like me and wouldn't know yourself."

"If I gave you something only I know, then you will be a little bit more me. And if you give me your memories, I will be a little more you. We will not be the same people who we were prior to this. Do you understand why my people are careful in picking who we wish to share with?"

I nodded. "Someone would know intimate details about you they could use against you." Could that be what had happened to me? Someone had wanted to find something out, like the whereabouts of the diamonds, and Taishi removed my memories to help me. I wanted to believe he wouldn't steal my memories. Of course, that didn't explain being violated or why I'd been dying in a hut when Lord Klark had found me.

Thoughts floated in and out of my mind like idle fancies. It was hard to grasp them in my state of languidness. I threaded my fingers through the moss near my head. My skin prickled pleasantly. I felt drowsy and simultaneously revitalized and awake. I had forgotten how relaxed and peaceful I could feel in body and mind after memory exchange.

"How do you feel? Will you allow me to share again with you?"

"Maybe one more, but I need a moment first." I scooted the attush down so that my back was once more exposed.

I rolled to my side and pressed my back into his chest. My nipples hardened in the absence of warmth. In the darkness where there was no one to chastise me, I felt no shame. He smoothed his hands up and down my goosebump-covered arm. I drew his arm over me and snuggled into his warmth. When I pulled the robe higher to cover my chest, my feet became exposed and I had to kick the cloth towel lower so my feet didn't chill. Nipa laughed and tugged the first robe over my shoulders and another around my feet.

He leaned into me so that I was sandwiched between his warmth and the hot-cold prickles of moss on my bare skin. My breasts puckered, and my nipples ached to be touched.

"One more?" he asked again. "Then I will bring you back to your bed."

"Yes." Once, twice, a dozen times more. I could have kept basking in his memories all night. I closed my eyes and slipped more deeply into the darkness.

He peeled back a section of robe to smooth his hands over my back. He exhaled and I exhaled. He inhaled and I inhaled. We sank into harmony with each other. The pressure of his hands increased slightly. A tingle of warmth surged from his fingers. Now that I was more relaxed, I could focus on the sensation sweeping over my back and up my shoulders. The memory soaked into me like water into a sponge.

I closed my eyes. A feather light touch brushed across my lips. Emotions coursed through me that I knew weren't my own. My heart surged in a mixture of excitement and trepidation. My palms were clammy and head light. I was so in love I would do anything for this girl. I squeezed her to me and let her kiss me as I tried not to do anything that would ruin this moment. When I kissed her back, her lips parted and her body melted against me. The memory slipped away and all too soon I was myself again.

I blinked, returning to myself and my own body. The twin moons in the sky illuminated the lush garden around us. Citrus-mint greeted my nose and grounded me. The detail of Nipa's memory had been so simple and yet so intimate.

Nipa pressed me into the moss. His breath was ragged and his heart beat wildly against my back. I squirmed under his heavy frame. As comfortable as his warmth felt, there was a reason unwed ladies didn't do this. I just couldn't bring myself to think about why it was at that moment.

Nipa kissed my shoulder before adjusting the robe over my back. Although pleasant, there was something about that gesture that felt unnatural.

As his weight shifted and his chest lifted from mine, his pelvis pressed me into the grove of moss. My breasts and belly tingled where the moss stroked them. I would swear I felt hands teasing my nipples, but perhaps it was only the wanting of touch that I felt. It had been so long since I had entertained the notion of desire. The blanket of green beneath me warmed, then cooled, then warmed again. My body couldn't make sense of the contradictory sensations.

He leaned a hand on the small of my back as he pulled away. I moaned with pleasure as I sank more deeply into the moss. He lifted himself from me and adjusted the robes to cover my back. I shivered from the loss of his warmth.

"What is it?" he asked. He leaned in again, a leg pressing over mine. His breath tickled against my cheek.

I ground my pelvis into the moss, forgetting all propriety. He chuckled and kissed my ear. "Oh, I see. You like memory moss."

He leaned his chest against me, pushing me more deeply into the welcome embrace of the green moss. His hips pressed against mine. I cried out as a quick, little spasm pulsed inside me.

"Felicity-chan, do you wish to go back? I did promise to return you to your room after this." His tone was teasing. He nuzzled his face into my neck. "Or do you wish to stay?"

I heard his voice, but didn't trust myself to answer intelligibly.

"I see. You must wish to leave and sleep beside my sister." He rolled off of me.

A wave of cold washed over me. "No, don't stop."

His weight returned. He rocked his hips against mine. His erection pressed into the robe covering my legs. I trembled under the trail of kisses he left down the back of my neck. I gasped as he tilted his pelvis against mine again. My flesh buzzed with sensation. I dug my fingers into the moss. When he shifted his weight again, the pleasure building between my legs released. I cried out as the spasms exploded inside me. Colors flashed before my eyes and I thought I was slipping again into another memory. When none came, I suspected the synesthesia was all me.

I loosened my grip on the moss. The tension in my muscles relaxed. I was suddenly embarrassed at the way I was panting like an animal in heat. He rolled off me, though he still remained close. He continued to stroke my hair.

I turned to face him. He laid a palm against my cheek.

"Tell me, did my memories suit you?"

"Mmhmm," I managed. I turned to nestle into his neck.

He enveloped me in his arms and tilted my chin up to kiss me. My lips parted and I allowed his tongue to slide across mine. He squeezed me so close that I could feel his wanting. I was surprised by how much I liked it. I didn't think I had ever experienced desire like this building in myself. At least not that I remembered.

I was so relaxed it took a long moment to realize what was amiss. He kissed me.

I pulled back. "I didn't think Jomon kissed."

He cleared his throat. "We don't. But . . . we have had gaiyojin on this world for over thirty years. I have learned many things from your people."

I snorted at that. "All in the name of diplomacy."

"No, it was for the sake of love. But that was long ago. This is in the name of diplomacy, yes? Your betrothed agreed to this exchange in the hope of finding pretty stones." He kissed his way down my neck.

My muscles went rigid. It wasn't just the thought of Meriwether, but all of reality that came crashing back down on me: diplomacy, my reasons for returning, and my reasons for agreeing to the wife-swap. I pulled away and fumbled for the sleeves of the robe.

"Did this evening not please you?"

"It wasn't that. It's just. . . ." I sighed in exasperation. Finding the sleeves, I put the robe on and tied it. I suspected it was inside out, but I didn't care.

"Do you feel I have stolen your virtue by kissing you?"

"Yes. No. I don't know. I don't like to lose myself like I did. I don't want to put myself in the same kind of situation as before. Especially not with someone whose reason for doing this is . . ." I struggled for the right word. "Diplomacy."

"You are offended by pragmatism, even though it is your own motivation?"

I drew my knees up to my chest. No matter what I said, it would make me feel no less the fool.

He rubbed his warm hands over my cold feet. "What if I said my motivation for tonight's memory exchange was to help you, not because of what I want Meriwether to give to me in return? I have put aside any hope of learning about your people's true character and motivations through memory exchange. What remains is simply for us to share."

There was so much more to it. How could I accuse him of ill-using me when I was the one who used him to help me?

I listened to the rustle of clothes as he dressed. I struggled to find words to express the disgust I felt at myself. My throat felt tight and it was hard to get the words out. "Memory moss makes me into a strumpet."

He pulled me to my feet. "Strumpet? I do not know this word in your language."

"A strumpet, a harlot, a whore. It's a woman who would mate with any man, usually for her own personal gain."

"Isn't all love for a kind of personal gain?"

"No, I'm not talking about love. I mean lust. And usually the personal gain is money. Or a kind of barter, like pretty stones."

He guided me along the path and through the gate in the wall, into the adjoining garden, and back inside the interior hallway. I had forgotten how warm the air of the courtyard was until I grew chilled away from the heat.

"There are no pretty stones involved in this exchange between us. So you are angry with yourself for feeling lust? Or lust without love?" There was a smile in his voice. "This would be so much easier for you if you forced yourself to fall in love with me and then became my permanent wife. That is the gaiyojin way, ne?"

I didn't laugh at his joke. It was too close to the truth. I chided myself for my stupidity. How could I marry Meriwether after this?

He tucked me into my bed that night, just as on the other nights, and left me to battle my personal demons.
Chapter Fourteen

Dearest Clementine, it isn't too late to return to the United Worlds and marry me. Despite the scandal it would cause marrying a divorced lady in the territories of greater Britain, I think you will find New Campton Manor Space Station remote enough, and my influence great enough, to silence any gossip that might occur.

—Lord Klark in a private message to Mrs. Clementine Earnshaw, date undetermined

Upon the morrow, Nipa asked, "Will you have me train you outside this morning? Or Tomomi?"

"Neither." I set down my fish breakfast. "I want you to help me learn something practical to retrieve my memories. I don't think combat has any value in memory exchange."

My thoughts since waking had been of the night before, our conversation and the memories he'd chosen to share. I pined for Taishi and Faith, and I wanted to understand what had happened. Shame erupted in me every time I thought of the way the memory moss had seduced me. I doubted I would ever feel for Meriwether what I had felt in those brief moments with Nipa. And as much as I hated to admit it to myself, those feelings for Nipa were nothing compared to what I still felt for Taishi.

The next time Nipa and I practiced memory exchange, I wouldn't let myself get distracted by the physical enjoyment of the experience. I needed to focus on the reason I had wanted to do memory exchange.

He absently drummed his fingers against one of the horns on his mask. His eyes regarded me warily. "Do you think you are ready to give me a memory? That is what it will take. I will need to sort through the thoughts around your absent memories and give them back to you."

I swallowed.

"We will need privacy. Have you finished eating?"

I ate the small serving of tart winter berries in the bowl in one bite. I wasn't going to let fresh fruit go to waste. "I'm ready," I said.

He rose and went to the door. He found hide strips secured to the wall that he used to tie the flap in place.

"Turn away and remove your robe. I will not look as you cover yourself with the blankets." He moved to the window and untied the noren curtain so that it fell closed. The room darkened.

Awkwardly I sank below the furs, aware of the goosebumps stealing across my flesh. I placed a hand over the lump in the blankets where I hid my pocket watch. The muffled tapping against my hand gave me something to focus on. I kept my mind on the present, lest I slip into the past.

He placed another log on the fire. "Roll onto your side so that I may touch your back."

I did so, hating this vulnerability. This was so much worse than the night before when he'd said he would give to me and expect nothing in return. I might actually lose memories this time.

His shadow danced over the floor as he removed his slippers and cloak. When I saw the tanuki headdress on the floor, I turned to look at his face. His eyes were kind. He placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Focus on relaxing," he said.

I stared into the golden embers in the darkness of the room. Clothes rustled behind me. He slipped under the blankets. His naked chest pressed against my back. There was no memory moss, but my skin tingled against him nonetheless. I didn't know which made me more nervous, the idea I was alone with a naked man I had kissed, or that I truly was going to perform memory exchange.

My heart beat so hard against my ribs it felt as though it would burst.

He circled an arm around me, hugging me close. "I will not surprise you. Everything I do, I will tell you first. I will give you a memory, then you will give it back."

I nodded. It was hard to focus on his words with the way my body responded to his touch. More than anything I wanted to melt against him and surrender myself as I had the night before.

He shifted away and I turned to see him lift a wooden box from behind us, which he placed next to my head. As soon as he opened the lid, I smelled the citrus and mint of the moss within.

"This is fresh. I picked it yesterday. It doesn't need to be ground and hydrated yet." He plucked a piece out and rubbed it in his palms. I positioned myself so that I faced away from him. The moment he rubbed his hands over my back, my skin warmed and prickled. I closed my eyes and let the darkness swallow me. The memory came more quickly this time than the previous night.

Pale moonbeams shone down on rippling water in front of me. In the reflection of the stream, the moons looked like mismatched eyes. The jungle was warm and muggy, pleasantly mild compared to the heat of the day. Still, it was hot enough that the coolness of the water didn't daunt me. I stepped into the refreshing current and let it cleanse the sticky sweat from my body. I ducked my head and submerged myself. I came out, water dripping into my eyes. A hand touched my shoulder. From the gentleness of the touch, I knew who it was. Surely she had to be naked if she was in the water. Even in the cold current, my body desired her.

The memory faded. I heard the crackle of the fire before me and opened my eyes to gaze into the flames. My body couldn't make up its mind whether I was hot or cold. I leaned into his embrace and hugged his arm more securely across my chest.

"Tell me what you saw."

I did.

"Good. Now you will give it back to me." He turned away, and I rolled over to face his back.

I broke off a piece of moss and crumbled it in my fingers before pressing my palms to the muscles over his shoulder blades.

"It works best to rub it into the skin."

I massaged my fingers into the muscles of his shoulders. The mere sight of his body made something deep inside me clench. Feeling the contours of his back, I wanted to hold him closer.

He moaned and sighed. "Are you . . . ano . . . think of memory?" His voice grew drowsy and he was hard to understand. I closed my eyes and recounted the memory, much like when I'd told him about it out loud. The memory was bright and shimmery even though it was at night. Only when it was over and I slipped back into myself did I realize I couldn't see any of the memory. I could remember telling him what I'd seen and the thoughts I'd had about it. I wondered if he would see exactly what I had seen or if he would interpret it differently. The pictures themselves were gone, but inklings of feeling remained. I rested my head against his shoulder. I wanted to sleep. Or cuddle. I smiled. It has been so long since I'd done this.

He turned to hug me. "You are relaxed enough that I think you will be able to feel comfortable doing what we are about to do next."

I giggled. It sounded like he was talking about something scandalous. I kissed him.

He laughed and squirmed back. "I will not let you distract me. Much." He kissed my nose. "I know this isn't easy, but I must ask you to give me one of your own memories. Choose one of joy that you are not afraid to part with and I will give it back to you."

It was hard to think of anything that didn't involve his lips pressed against mine. After several attempts, I thought of the time I'd met Shoko Nipa in her private tree chamber to speak with her about permitting me to marry Taishi. I wondered how reliable my memory of this experience had been and how much my trepidation might have tainted it.

He stroked my hair from my face. "Have you decided? Tell me about this moment so it will help you remember after you give it to me."

"It's about Shoko Nipa, the Chiramantepjin leader. She was intimidating when she wore her chiramantep headdress. She became strict and formal. When she wasn't playing that part, she was like a mother to me—and to her son. The problem was, she so rarely went without her Chiramantepjin eboshi. I didn't know what to expect when I went to her."

"That's enough. Now share this memory." He shifted and turned his back to me.

I broke off a little piece of the memory moss and crumpled it up in my palms before placing my hands on his back.

I closed my eyes and concentrated. Mama Shoko sat before me dressed in her skirt and jewelry made of seeds and pits. She served me tea. I nearly forgot to pour hers in return and when I did, my hands shook. Her smile was warm and genuine.

"I'm in love with Taishi," I blurted out. I had never been very good at holding my feelings in.

She nodded. "Have you told him?"

"Yes. We have told each other many times."

A sweet smile played across her lips. "Have you given yourself to each other?"

I wasn't sure what she meant. "Do you mean memories? Indeed, many times."

"No, no," she laughed. "That is good, but I mean physically. You must love each other in body and mind."

I shifted uneasily. How could I speak of such things to his mother? "People from the stars don't discuss intimate matters."

She took my hand in her dark, weathered one. "If you are to marry my son, are you going to live among the stars or on Aynu-Mosir? If it is on this world, you must adopt our ways. You must learn to speak of such things, ne? Right now you are a girl with fanciful dreams. If you are to marry my son, you will dress as Chiramantepjin and adorn yourself as a woman like myself." She nodded to the pale skin of my wrists. "Come back to me to discuss this matter again when you have the markings of a woman."

My mind wandered to the pain of the old grandmother pricking my skin with blue pear stems and rubbing ash into the wounds. It hurt so much and took hours for her to finish the double black lines on my wrists. It itched as it healed and I fretted the scratching would give me away, but it was Faith telling on me that got me in trouble.

I saw myself before Taishi's mother again. I wore a grass skirt and a woven top made from plant fibers. The tunic was reserved for the elderly or special occasions, but I hadn't felt comfortable going bare breasted. She didn't chide me for my compromise. Instead she smiled and took my hands. "Now tell me, child, have you had each other?"

"No, not in the way I think you mean. If I did, I would be insulting the traditions of my people and disobeying my father. Taishi agreed to wait until after we are married. But we have heeded your advice and been physically close in other ways. And look." I held up my tattooed wrists with pride.

Had she been wearing her headdress, I don't know if her answer would have differed, but in her role as mother she squeezed me to her side. "You are a good child, true to your elders and yourself. I cannot deny you when you are motivated out of respect, not fear of new traditions. Have you told your father your intention to marry?"

I gulped. "He doesn't know Taishi and I are in love. I think he will be more likely to say yes if you approach him. If you say it is in the interest of our people uniting. He wants diplomacy. He will do anything for the secret of the red diamonds."

She shook her head at me. "You must prove to him you are worthy first. Then I will speak with him."

My mind traveled to my father's angry words when I did speak to him. I thought of—

A cold jolt washed over me. Something changed and the memory was gone. My mind wasn't connected to Hoku Nipa. I was aware I didn't know what I'd been thinking of. Something about my father being angry. Wasn't I supposed to give Nipa happy memories? Blast!

I shook the strange jittering feeling from my hands. Nipa turned to me. His eyes were drowsy and he yawned. "That wasn't one memory. More like four."

"I apologize, Hoku Nipa. I haven't done this for a long time."

"There is no need for apologies. It wasn't intentional. What you did is very rare, but comes easily to you. It is a condition my people call dosha kuzure, or mudslide. It's the inability to stop yourself from sharing too much. You need to focus when you give memories so that one cannot take too much."

Focus, like in Tomomi's lessons.

A tickle of almost memory surfaced inside me, a hint that I might have felt guilt for giving too many memories before. "Could I have given Taishi too many of my memories? Is that how he might have so many?"

"You tell me."

My stomach clenched. I had blamed him for stealing my memories. But he was alive and he would give them back. I would see him and he would explain everything to me. I felt more hope than I had in a long time.

He laid his head on my shoulder. "I want to know what you remember."

"I made my father angry. Perhaps it was because of the memory exchange. I think Faith told him."

"What else do you think you remember?"

His choice of words didn't go unnoticed. Had I gotten it wrong? "There was something about the Chiramantepjin Nipa. Yes, that was what I wanted to show you. I went to see her." Inklings of embarrassment, pride and then anger came to me, but I didn't understand their origins.

"Those are good guesses, but not exactly correct. It is important you understand how to interpret what remains behind when memories are gone. Sometimes what you assume is not so." He broke off a small bit of moss. "I will give these memories back now."

I turned away. No sooner had his hands touched my back than the memories came flowing into me. I saw all I had given him; Mama Shoko, my tattoos, and our conversation. The memories slipped back into me until my mind was once again full and there was no more to drink in. I became aware of the pop of a log on the fire, the fur blankets, and Nipa's hands on my naked back. I turned to snuggle closer and circled an arm around him. I had been wrong in what I thought had happened. My father had never known about Taishi and me sharing memory moss. Why had I thought Faith had told him that? For the briefest moment, I wondered if Nipa could have altered my memories, but that didn't feel true. I wasn't very good at interpreting the shadows memories left behind.

Safe and secure in Nipa's arms, I closed my eyes. I wondered what else I had been wrong about.

He kissed my face and brushed his lips against my jaw. I kissed him deeply, threading my fingers through his short hair and wrapping a leg around his. He hardened against me. I giggled.

He pulled his body back a few inches and tucked my head under his chin. "If only you would kiss me like this when you have not had memory moss clouding your judgment."
Chapter Fifteen

Everything the guidebook claims about the Jomon is wrong. If you wish to establish peaceful trade, I highly suggest you learn the language as your first step. Even so, don't expect that to get you very far. You will always be an outsider to the Jomon as long as you act as an American, dress as an American, and are an American. It can be quite infuriating to be unable to keep your own culture.

—Faith Earnshaw, recorded by a colonist of the United Worlds of America upon meeting with a local tribe and their resident artist

I might have dozed longer except for Sumiko excusing herself as she attempted to enter. "Gomen kudasai."

I sat up with a start, clutching the blanket to my chest. Nipa stirred. I was naked and unchaperoned, which would be the ruin of my reputation if a British citizen found out. If I was about to earn the reputation of a harlot, I would have liked to have done more than kissing and falling asleep. Well, part of me wanted that anyway.

The door cover rippled. The impression of her hand pressed into the hide. "Felicity-san, are you in there?"

Nipa yawned. "Little sister, come back later. She's taking a nap."

Sumiko's friendly tone disappeared and her angry sister tone took over. "Felicity-san missed her lesson with Tomomi Sensei. And now she has missed lunch. Is she to miss waltzing and music today? Her not-husband has already asked for her no less than three times."

Nipa wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer. "Tell him she's busy with wifely duties."

I could hardly stand to think of what Meriwether would say to such words. It was one thing to reclaim my almost-memories. It was another to enjoy doing so. I was a horrible person and unfit to be his fiancée.

"I will be presentable shortly," I said.

I slipped from Nipa's grasp. I hurriedly dressed in my furs and fumbled for the door ties. Sumiko waited in the hall. A strained smile was plastered across her face. The moment she set eyes on me, she said, "You are not presentable. Today you will go to the onsen. I will not take no for an answer."

She must have known I would object because she ran a finger over my cheek and showed me it came away grimy and green.

Of course she would make me go during the most crowded time of the day.

Had the memory of my conversation with Shoko Nipa not been so fresh in mind, I might have refused. When on Aynu-Mosir, do as Jomons do, I told myself. I had once been willing to wear what Chiramantepjin wore, more or less, and had adopted many of their ways. I had even allowed a young man to whom I wasn't married to see me naked. Surely a bathhouse with women was less scandalous.

In the onsen, I undressed and scrubbed myself in a corner, pretending I didn't feel self-conscious. I fixed my gaze on the moss-covered wall even though I saw people watching me. Before heading to the stone enclosure full of hot spring water, I picked out a place where fewer women and children sat and climbed in. Sumiko was already undressed and sitting on the far end with a group of ladies. I would have been happy to sit where I was for the obligatory amount of time, but Sumiko waved to me, indicating she wanted me to join her.

Reluctantly I stood, exposing myself to walk through the hip deep water. My skin chilled in the transition from hot water to cool air. I fought the urge to cover myself. I told myself there was no scandal in this, but after living on a British space station, it was hard to unlearn my prudishness. That and it added to my self-consciousness with the six women near Sumiko staring openly.

"Oh! She is very curvy," one of the women said.

"Yes, like a nursing mother."

My face probably flushed ten shades of red. It was a relief to sit down again and be covered up to the neck by the water. Steam rose from the surface around us and I fixed my eyes on the swirls of vapor.

Sumiko dipped her head in a slight bow to me. "See, the onsen isn't so bad."

"I have never seen him want any woman. No wonder he favors her," a young woman said. She touched my hair and smiled. "Such a different color."

One of the women whispered, though still loud enough to overhear. "So much less shy than Heisu-san."

One of the women elbowed her.

I smiled as though I hadn't heard her say my sister's name and my heart wasn't squeezing in response. I managed to make my voice even and calm. "Are there other foreigners you've met besides my sister and me? I have heard about Michi. Does she not come here with my sister as well?"

All eyes looked to Sumiko. Her lips stretched into a forced smile. Someone coughed. No one said anything. I tried to think of something to say to lessen the tension in the air, but I could only wonder what everyone was hiding.

An old grandmother shuffled down the steps into the water and plopped herself between Sumiko and me, forcing me to scoot over.

"How many times did he have you last night?" the old woman asked.

I wasn't sure how to answer. Of course, I also didn't know what she was actually asking. "Have my body or my memories?"

"Both!"

The younger women giggled and the tension lifted. I didn't know which was worse, them talking about me as though I wasn't there, or the questions that bordered on rudeness. Then again, Shoko Nipa had once asked me such things. She had assured me they weren't rude.

"How many times did you have him last night? Which memories did he share with you?" another asked.

This was all so intensely personal. I didn't want to share any of this with them. I also didn't want to be rude if this was their version of normal. I told them about the lesser of the two evils—about the memory in the cold stream on the hot night he shared. Though, I did leave out the part about him feeling desire. There was only so much sharing I could stand.

"He only has you for seven more nights," a young woman said. "Why would he share those things?"

"He is courting her," Sumiko said with a sly smile. "He has a fortnight to win her heart. Tell us what you shared with him."

"What do you mean, win my heart?"

The women looked at me quizzically. Sumiko bowed her head. "Sumimasen. I forget you are unaccustomed to this tradition. Tsuma no kokan is temporary in order to learn about another tribe's intentions or to learn more about a particular matter. But sometimes a wife prefers her new husband and wishes to keep him rather than her old one." Her smile was sly.

I wasn't sure if she thought I might change my mind—or hoped I would, so that Meriwether would be single and available. The old women nudged each other.

Whatever Sumiko's motives, a permanent arrangement wasn't going to happen. I was already engaged. I could only imagine how heartbroken Meriwether would be that I'd agreed to marry him after all this time, only to forsake his love for someone else.

"How many times has he shared himself with you?" one of the younger women asked.

I wondered if the times we had told each other about our lives counted or they only meant with the memory exchange. "I don't know. I didn't count."

This answer brought on more giggling.

One of the old women asked a question, but her dialect was hard to understand. She was of the Isepojin province, I guessed.

I asked, "Are you asking about my other husband? No, Meriwether isn't my husband yet."

She pointed to the tattoos on my arms, similar to their own. I made out the word "who" and "husband" and looked for Sumiko for help but she was turned away, grabbing a clean washcloth on the stone ledge behind her.

"I have no husband. I've never been married."

The youngest woman laughed like I told a joke. The older women tsked and clucked their tongues. Just when I thought I was getting good at translating.

The wife-swap was the closest thing I had experienced to marriage. I had shared more of myself with Nipa than any man—possibly even Taishi. Even after all the years I'd lived shut up in Lord Klark's household, Meriwether didn't know my body or mind this well. It would be torture to have to go back to my gaiyojin ways after finally feeling like I'd returned home.

No, this wasn't home, I told myself. This planet didn't have running water, electricity or modern medicine. How could I tolerate a simplistic life after such a pampered one on the ship and space station?

If Taishi wanted me after all this time, would my answer still be yes?

I thought on this when I joined Meriwether to watch contests of strength and skill outside. Fortunately he'd opted to sit out this time. He tugged me over to a mound of snow that children had sculpted into frozen benches and sat me down. His expression was serious. I swallowed, afraid someone had told him of my indiscretion.

Meriwether leaned closer. "I don't know if you realize this, but we've been duped. That large woman who carried me off—Tomomi Sensei—I don't think she was meant as my wife at all."

I raised an eyebrow. "Didn't I already tell you as much?"

He went on unfazed. "She's really a kind of guide and bodyguard meant to keep me safe. Isn't that sweet? They were looking after me. They just like to have a good laugh at our expense. I hope the wife-swap affair didn't give you too much of a start."

I shook my head.

"Who served as your bodyguard?" he asked.

I glanced across the expanse of snow at Nipa watching us. "The leader has been my guide. Though Sumiko has been the one sharing my bed to keep me company at night." That was mostly true, but it tasted like a lie in the mouth upon uttering it.

"Capital," he said. He stared off in the distance with a smile on his face, his usual expression more day-dreamy than usual.

"Have you been enjoying your time here?" I asked.

"Mmmhmm."

"Is everything all right?" I asked.

"Indeed, Felicity darling." He patted my hand.

It wasn't like him to be so frugal with his words. It seemed everyone was keeping secrets these days. I had too many other thoughts on my mind to inquire further.

At dinner I asked Nipa quietly lest other Jomon hear. "How long must I wait tonight before you join me?"

"Do you not want time to yourself?" He set his bowl of soup down. "How soon do you want me to come?"

"As soon as you are able."

His lips twisted his into a cocky grin. "Either you want to pursue more memory exchange or you cannot wait to ravish me. Which is it, Felicity-chan?"

The only light in the dim room was firelight. Alone, I threw off my fur clothes and fumbled in the blankets for my attush. I stood when I spotted it on the table.

"Gomen kudasai," Nipa called from the other side of the curtain. He even knocked on the wall.

It would have been easy to tell him not to come in, but I hesitated. He lifted the hide and ducked under, halting midway through. "Oh. Ano . . . should I . . . ? You're, ano, ahem." He backed out, eyes diverted.

"You've seen me naked. We have that out of the way." I swallowed, hoping the depth of my self-consciousness didn't show. "You might as well come in all the way and tell me what you think." I tried to make my voice sound light and nonchalant. I didn't think I managed.

He stepped forward. The flap of the noren fell closed behind him. His lips parted and he looked as though he would speak. I held my breath, aware of the way my heart sped up. He circled slowly, his eyes appraising every inch of bare flesh.

Goosebumps rose on my flesh. My nipples puckered and hardened in the cold.

He lifted his Tanukijin headdress and dropped it to the floor. "I am unfit to wear this when I cannot concentrate on my duties as leader. Right now I definitely cannot think of anything other than husbandly duties."

"I didn't think nudity was supposed to be . . . romantic."

"Not naked children. And not partial nudity for adults. But none of you is covered. You keep so much of yourself hidden it makes the wanting to see so much stronger." He stepped in closer. Close enough to kiss me, though he refrained. Part of me hoped he wouldn't—that small voice of gaiyojin reason. Another part wanted him to kiss me, the part that knew I'd already gone much further than was decent and ladylike—the part that wanted more.

He licked his lips. "What would you do if I took off my robe right now?"

"I don't know what I'd do. It would make me more uncomfortable than I already am." I tried to laugh but it came out as a choked cough.

His mouth widened in a grin. "I will endeavor to make you more comfortable." He took my hand and held it away from my body. He placed the other on his shoulder and rested his hand on the small of my back. "Meriwether-san said this is a method of courtship among your people." He hummed and stepped to the side and back. He was off key and the tune wasn't quite right, but I recognized it as a waltz. His box step lacked the perfection of those who had danced at balls all their adulthood, but he made up for his lack of ability with his generous smile.

This wasn't how I would have made a naked young lady more comfortable, but he did make me laugh.

"Uh-oh. I just stepped on your foot," he laughed. "Charbonny-san says that is very bad and ladies do not like that."

My legs became twisted as I attempted a side step on the wrong foot. I nearly lost my balance and stumbled into him. "I think we're even. I just stepped on yours."

He lifted me and twirled me around in his arms. "I am told that is a more advanced move. I hope you can keep up."

He leaned in and planted a quick kiss on my lips before continuing the box step again. His eyes looked everywhere in the room that wasn't my naked body. "Are you more comfortable now that I have performed some of your courtship ritual?" He hummed his alien waltz.

"Is it true? You are courting me?" I asked. "This temporary marriage isn't just about diplomacy or aiding me in getting my memories back?"

"You decide." He released my hand and wrapped his arms around me as he leaned in.

He smelled of fire smoke and musky earth as he held me closer. I lost myself in his scent. He brought his mouth close to mine, though he didn't kiss me. I circled my arms around his neck. I lifted my chin so that my lips were closer to his. He moved a hairsbreadth back and smiled. I craned my neck toward him but he pulled back, his grin growing broader.

"You're teasing me?" I asked.

"Of course." He planted another quick kiss on my mouth.

I turned my face away. Two could play at this game. From his devilish grin I knew he enjoyed such play. When I leaned in to kiss him the next time, he let me press my lips to his. He held me close and wove his fingers into my hair. I closed my eyes and drank him in. He tasted of spicy tea and sweet summer memories. His tongue dipped into my mouth. My skin flushed, and warmth radiated between my legs.

He broke away. "Now, another kiss or memory exchange?"

I hated myself for being too much of a coward to say what I really wanted. "Memories," I said. "Maybe another kiss afterward."

At the absence of his arms, cold skated across my skin. He retrieved the box from the corner and planted himself on my blankets. "Do you kiss Meriwether?"

I kneeled beside him. "Not if I can help it." I was vividly aware of my nudity, not quite accustomed to feeling comfortable with it. Yet, being alone with him was less humiliating than enduring the ogling women in the onsen. Nipa didn't ask embarrassing questions or make a commentary on my appearance.

"Truly you feel no love for him?" he asked.

"I didn't say that. Love is more than kissing."

"For some, yes, but for you I think there can be no love without kissing." He leaned in and touched his lips to mine. His mouth trailed across my cheek and down my neck. I held onto his arm, desire building in me. As he brushed his lips under my collarbone, I gasped from unexpected pleasure.

The warmth of his breath left my skin. He opened the memory moss box. Citrus mint tingled in my nose.

"Are you ready for memory exchange? You may want to turn away for this." He untied his robe and waited.

I didn't turn away. I watched with a mixture of embarrassment and eagerness as he shed his robe. The shadows of the flickering firelight cast definition over his chiseled muscles. I smoothed a hand against his chest and belly. His muscles contracted.

His voice turned husky. "You are dangerous."

I laughed. "Me? Why is that?"

He lifted me and set me on his lap. A thrill rushed through me. It was hard not to want this beautiful man who so obviously wanted my affection in return. The fact that he hadn't pressured me made me regard him with even more respect.

He kissed my nose. "You do not know it, Felicity of the Stars, but you are in love with me."

I shook my head. Surely he jested. Then again, maybe he was right. How was it conceivable I would allow myself to be naked in a man's arms whom I didn't hold in such high affection? I trusted him. I drew my finger along the line of his square jaw.

He squeezed me tighter. Finding that not enough, I turned to straddle him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and drank in the feel of his skin against mine.

I brushed my lips across his ear, eliciting a shiver from him. "Who is that more dangerous for, me or you?"

"Me." For once there was no mirth in his voice. I pulled my head back enough to find his visage serious, save for the smile, but it was sad, like when he spoke of his late wife.

I touched his cheek. "Indeed. Because you are still in love, Hoku?" I kissed his temple and brushed my fingers over his high cheekbone and into his hair.

"Because you bring pleasure to my heart."

I glanced down into the shadows between us. "I doubt it's only your heart I bring pleasure to."

His devilish grin returned then. He cupped my derriere in his hands and tilted my hips closer. From the hardness of his erection pressed against my belly, I knew I was right.

I was aware of the throb of my own pulse deep inside me. Desire built, and I felt slick and wet between my legs. I wanted him as I had never wanted any man. I feared my body would give my lust away, and then where would I be? The concept of chastity felt remote and abstract at the moment.

We were so close, I wondered if he would take me right then if I asked him to compromise me. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, I felt no anxiety over the idea of losing my virtue. My only fear was of myself. I had unfinished business with Taishi. My heart was too conflicted to let my body give in to lust.

He buried his face in my hair. "I would do anything for your happiness. If you asked me to give up all my treasures for you, I would, and then where would I be? The wife-swap will be finished in less than seven days. When you leave here, I may be the one who will experience a broken heart again."

I suspected he was as bad as Meriwether, thinking he'd fallen in love with a woman at first sight. And yet, I felt simultaneously flattered by the attention, for I had never wanted Meriwether's heart, whereas I found I craved Nipa's.

I kissed his lips. He enveloped me in the warmth of his arms.

Holding me with one arm, he opened the box with his other hand and tore off a piece of moss. "Shall I have you like this?" His smile turned mischievous. "Your memories, I mean."

Chapter Sixteen

I gave up everything to be with the man I loved. There isn't one day that goes by that I don't think about how miserable I would be if I had married Lord Klark as my parents wished.

—Entry from the journal of Clementine Earnshaw, the Santa Maria

Nipa and I shared each other many times in memory exchange. He had me in my room that night and again upon the morrow in the private courtyard. The following night we shared memories in my chamber. Each time I felt myself surrendering a little more to him. He adorned me with a garland of kisses as he removed my robe. His mouth moved lower, plucking at my nipples and making me cry out in pleasure.

I loved and hated the way I felt after the memory moss, relaxed and full of wanting. I curled into him as though it were the most natural thing in the world and we had done this a thousand times. He stroked my back first, then belly with memory moss, and my breasts when there was no more fresh skin left to soak the memories in. The place between my legs throbbed and I ached for him more than the last time.

Each time, he pressed against me, his manhood hard and insistent, though he made no attempt to go further. "I have promised not to steal your virtue, but I think we can please each other in other ways, ne?" he said.

My body already languid and relaxed, and his fingers tingling of memory moss, he parted the folds around my maidenhood and slipped his finger inside. The pleasure was so intense I cried out. My voice echoed so loud in the night air I thought people would come running. Propriety must have truly left me because I didn't care and bade him to keep going.

With every kiss, I forgot more of the world around me. His fingers grew slick from the wetness inside me. He found the sensitive knob within my lips and stroked it until I forgot myself and mewed like an animal. I dug my fingers into the flesh of his shoulders and arched into his fingers. I shuddered with pleasure. With every jolt of ecstasy coursing through me like fireworks, I lost a little more of myself. If he was trying to court me, his methods were working. I was long past denying my feelings for him and long past denying my feelings in general. For the first time in years I felt alive, and dare I say, happy.

I lay in an exhausted heap in his arms, cold with sweat as I snuggled against his warmth. "Anata," I said, using the endearment he'd wanted me to call him days before.

The little smirk on his lips told me he was pleased with himself. "Tell me how wonderful you think I am," he said.

I nuzzled into his shoulder. "Very, very, very wonderful."

"A wonderful what?"

I trailed my fingers down his belly, bringing them up again when I heard his breath catch. I threaded my fingers through the thick hair separating me from his manhood. He moaned with pleasure as I grasped his swollen erection. "A very, very, very wonderful husband." To say the words sent a forbidden thrill though me. Even if this was a valid relationship to the Jomon, it was not to the United Worlds of America or the British. And what did it matter what gaijin thought? No one needed to know but Nipa and me.

I stroked and squeezed him.

He removed my hand and pinned it against the ground. I arched my spine toward him, thrusting my breasts closer. His gaze fell on the puckered skin around my nipples and he plucked at them with his mouth, elongating them and making them swell. Desire built in me again. I struggled against his grip but he held fast. The longing for him was almost painful. I could hardly imagine how he controlled himself.

He kissed me again before breaking away. He shook his head. "You would drive me to distraction and make me forget my promise to you." He kissed my fingers and released his grip. "We have shared enough happy memories. It is time for more serious ones. Are you awake enough for this?"

I nodded.

"Close your eyes and think back to the time just after you lost your memories," he said. "Tell me what happened."

I told him of Meriwether finding me and Lord Klark's dismay to come across me in such a state.

"Now go back before that. Think to your first thought as you woke." He lay beside me and circled his arm around my waist. He rested a hand on my arm. My skin still tingled with pining. I wanted him to touch me like he had earlier in the night.

He pinched my rump. "Concentrate," he said.

I wondered what it was that had given me away. Perhaps the tilt of my pelvis.

I refocused. I was almost certain my first thought had been feeling befuddled finding Meriwether trying to kiss me. I said as much.

"Think back to when your mind was dark right before you opened your eyes. Do you have any feelings? Impressions?" When I was silent he asked, "Imagine someone specific you knew. Imagine your sister."

At the mention of Faith, my yearning slipped away. My heart felt heavy with shame but I didn't know why. I felt sorrow and pity, some of it directed at myself but some at her. There was something more there, something I could almost grasp, but it was out of my reach.

I sighed in exasperation.

"I want you to send these feelings into me. I will see if I can sort through them and give them back to you. Sometimes we see things differently the second time around."

I laughed, thinking he could be talking about my own journey to Aynu-Mosir, or a second chance at love. So many second times in my life were better than the firsts.

I applied the memory moss to his chest and thought of my sister and all the feelings built up around her. I slipped a little deeper in the reflections. She hated me. I tried not to be cross with her for being miserable. But I had made her miserable. I hurt her and it was her right to hate me. It was only fitting she should wish ill to come to me in my weakest hour. She probably wanted me to die. Pain ripped me open from the insides and I cried out. I opened my eyes and was once again in the fire lit room. My loins ached but I didn't know why. What had I seen?

Nipa stirred. His eyes were scrunched up and pained. He pulled me closer, his breath ragged in my ear. "I think I see."

He rubbed the moss on my skin. The memories soaked back into me, but with a new kind of clarity. When it was over, I struggled for words. "Lord Klark said—well, his doctor—and the maids overheard, so I assumed—" I tried to get it all out, but my thoughts tumbled over each other like waves. "I think Faith did something to me right before I lost my memories. I don't know what. She tried to hurt me. She did hurt me." I was suddenly glad I hadn't seen my sister yet.

"No, that isn't quite it," Nipa said. "But I think you are closer. We will try again and see if you can find new thoughts and meaning."

"But she was there. You felt that, didn't you? When I lost my memories, she was there."

"Yes," he said. "But it is important not to jump to conclusions. There is no context for these thoughts. And Faith-san didn't know how to trade memories. Understand, she was not capable of taking anything from you. There is more to the past than what you can collect in reflections."

Yet she had been there. I wondered what role she had played.
Chapter Seventeen

A journey of a billion miles starts with one spaceship.

—Ancient Jomon proverb

I entered the great hall, clad in the Tanukijin style of dress. Nipa was meeting with the elders and I was given free rein to do as I pleased. Meriwether and Charbonneau sat with Grandmother Ami in the nearly empty great hall. Captain Ford stared out the window, apart from the others. Meriwether kneeled near a fire trying to communicate with Grandmother Ami despite the barriers of language. She imitated a cough and held up a long green leaf.

"Capital! I think she means this one is used to treat coughs. Write that down, will you?" Meriwether said to his servant.

Charbonneau scribbled something in a notebook with a pencil. How he had contrived to get his supplies back I didn't know.

Meriwether glanced up. An attempt at a smile twitched his mouth before he returned his gaze to the leaves Grandmother Ami sorted. The warmth drained from my face. Did my guilt show? Did I look too happy?

I didn't want to hurt Meriwether, but I had never wanted to marry him either. He was too much like a brother. More than that, he belonged to a different world than I did.

Charbonneau picked up a long white root caked with dirt and tried to say the word for sore throat in Jomon.

Captain Ford poked at a dripping icicle at the window and sighed. I had never seen him so sullen, nor free of the stench of alcohol. I wondered if someone had cut off his supply of spirits.

I wandered closer. "What's wrong, Captain? Still haven't found the secret hiding place to the Jomon treasures?"

He turned. His eyes were bloodshot and his usually jovial expression somber.

"Are you well, Captain?" I asked. I prayed to my non-existent Jomon ancestors that no one knew what Nipa and I had been up to. But when I thought how lacking in discretion we had been on many nights—venturing out to his onsen while giggling in the corridors, not tying the door cover closed, and making far too much noise—I felt ill at ease.

"I had a bit much too drink last night and believe I might have insulted one of the maidens here. Oh bollocks, I know I insulted her."

I blinked, startled by his admission. My own lack of propriety faded from my mind. I could hardly keep the anger veiled in my tone. "What, pray tell, did you do to insult her?"

He stared out at the gray clouds above the cliffs. "I, uh, might have sat her on my lap and kissed her. Blast! You weren't jesting when you said they don't like that."

"Oh? What did she do about it?" Hopefully dropped some hot coals in his lap.

"Everyone made a fuss and I apologized. I don't think she understood what I said." He grunted and I thought that was the end of his story, but he went on. "She came to me in my bedroom in the middle of the night. I thought she meant to show me there were no hard feelings."

Revulsion crept under my skin and made me shiver. How he could be so dense was impossible to understand. I hoped she had done something horrid to him.

His voice lowered to a hoarse whisper. "It was the oddest thing. She slathered some chucky massage oil on my back and all of a sudden, I experienced some kind of drug-induced hallucination.

"I wasn't myself any more. I was this maiden—the one I'd kissed—living in a mud hut as a girl. Suddenly a bunch of white men like us came and killed my brothers and bashed my baby sister's head in. They did unspeakable things to her—to me—I mean. Some of it involved . . . kissing." He shuddered. "Every terror and loathing she felt, I felt. I was her and there was no separation between her and me. It made sense when I was experiencing the vision, but now it becomes jumbled up and I'm not sure if it was her, or me, they did these things to.

"I saw death. I saw our terrascaping machines used for things they were never made for. I lived weeks, no—maybe months—of this young woman's life as she was tortured and ill-used. The worst of it, I saw Captain Percival Cook, the first captain I'd served under—a man I had respected as a lad—at a sort of labor camp, raping girls who hardly looked as if they'd reached puberty and picking out slaves to sell on the black market.

"The horrors in these visions lasted forever. In this dream, the Chiramantepjin tribe came and rescued the refugees. They killed our people and I actually didn't feel angry about it. I was glad." Tears spilled down his face. "That's the memory exchange, isn't it? Those weren't hallucinations. They were real?"

I chose my words carefully. "It is possible, but I didn't think Jomon were permitted to exchange memories with someone who didn't consent."

He snorted. "Oh, I consented, I just didn't know what I was consenting to."

I wondered if that had been my undoing as well.

"I tried to tell Miss Sumiko that, but there was a big fuss about it this morning and they dragged the woman off. I think they mean to hang that girl. I feel awful about it now."

Is that why they were in such a somber mood? The injustice of it swelled inside me. This girl didn't deserve to be executed. She'd already been through enough. Without another word, I ran off to the counsel room. I threw back the curtains of the noren. Nipa sat with his sister and the elders in the stifling warmth. Both siblings wore tanuki headdresses.

"Sumimasen," I interrupted. I gave a curt bow before plunging on in Jomon. "Have I come too late? Have you already tried and executed that poor girl? It wasn't her fault. Captain Ford needed to understand what the people here have gone through. He invited her to be intimate with him, though his form of intimacy differs from that of the memory exchange."

Nipa tilted his head to the side, studying me.

Sumiko rubbed the bridge of her nose and sighed. "Felicity-san, what is it you speak of?"

"I'm sure he deserved it." I cringed at my words. I couldn't help wondering if someone else felt I deserved the opposite—that my memories should be taken away. Was I a hypocrite?

"The girl who gave Captain Ford her memories. He said she was dragged off to be executed. It's not fair. She didn't do anything that bad. I know it's a taboo among your people, but . . . ."

The elders muttered and shook their heads. I caught the words "impulsive" and "meddling." At first I thought they meant the maiden—or even Captain Ford. It took a moment to realize they meant me.

I opened my mouth to say more, but Nipa put up a hand to silence further words. "Akeme has been dealt with already. But be aware, her punishment was just. She was told she is not permitted to join in festivities for the following four days while your party is here, nor is she allowed any more contact with Captain Ford other than doing his laundry as her consequence." He stood. A hint of a smile laced his lips. "I appreciate your concern. Shall I talk to you in private to reassure you?"

Sumiko said a little too sweetly. "I am sure you would like another opportunity to spend time alone talking with your wife, but you have duties to perform, older brother, and I do not speak of husbandly duties. Sit."

Had a British woman spoken to a man in such a way, I was certain she would have been struck, but here no one acted as though it were out of place. The two elderly men nearest Sumiko cackled. Nipa himself laughed, though his face reddened under his mask. He looked from me to the elders, as if torn by which duty was more important.

I realized my mistake, as well as the way I distracted him. I cleared my throat and bowed my head. "Sumimasen. I shall take my leave of you." It was hard to say whose face was redder, mine or his.

"I will go reassure your wife," Sumiko said. She removed her headdress and gracefully rose. She linked her arm through mine and guided me from the room.

Her cheeks were flushed, though I didn't know if it was from anger or the warmth of the room.

"I apologize," I said. "I didn't mean to interrupt. I just thought she would be executed and—I suppose the captain was a little melodramatic. Sumimasen."

She led me down the drafty hallways to a balcony that overlooked the children playing in the courtyard.

She patted my arm. "No harm is done. If anything, my brother will be sure to endlessly brag about your concern for the welfare of his people." She rolled her eyes in a gesture I had often seen on my sister's visage when she grew vexed with me. She glanced at me and smiled. "I am glad my brother is finally happy. He deserves someone like you."

I hugged my arms to me, chilled in the frosty air. Sumiko seemed unaffected. Out in the bright daylight her cheeks were crimson. She watched the children throwing snowballs below. My teeth chattered.

I stared at the goosebumps on my bare arms. The black tattoos were vivid against my pale skin out here in the light. Yet the longer I stayed and dressed as the Jomon like I had long ago, the more I felt at home rather than out of place.

Sumiko rubbed her temples and closed her eyes. Only one set of black lines decorated her arms.

"Sumiko, why do you not have tattoos like many of the other women?" The double band on her wrists could have been mistaken as bracelets.

"I do have tattoos. These mean I have come of age. It is a sign of maturity, a way to show I am old enough to marry."

Yes, Mama Shoko had told me it was the tradition to show I was a woman in this way if I wanted to marry. I had seen a few other girls with only the black parallel lines tattooed on their wrists, but hadn't thought much about them. Sumiko must have been close to my age, so it seemed like her arms should look like mine. Yet age must not be the only consideration. There were also girls younger than she who sported the full sleeve of patterns from wrist to elbow like mine.

"Is it impolite to ask why yours aren't full like mine?"

She leaned against the wall, looking tired. "The double bands at the top mean a woman is married." She glanced at the parallel lines just below my elbows. "I will not marry because I do not wish to bring children into this world. I refuse to grow attached to children who will die of disease, nor can I let myself love a husband who will be killed defending our home as so many others have. To marry is to have hope, and I have none." Her beatific smile remained in place as she said this. I only now realized how that smile was a mask, much more so than Nipa's headdress.

I stared at my own arms. A lattice of geometric designs in such a deep blue that it almost appeared black covered my skin. At the top were a second set of double bands. A prickle of memory surfaced in my mind before sinking again. I had intended to marry Taishi but I hadn't. Or had I and just not remembered because those memories had been taken away?

Surely this had to be the reason the woman in the onsen laughed at the idea I had never been with a man. And why Sumiko had laughed when she had chaperoned my first conversation with Nipa. Although I wasn't sure if my tattoos had even been visible then.

Sumiko rubbed at her temples as though her head hurt. "The patterns in between can represent many things. It can be filled with swirling patterns that represent trials in a woman's life. Some women choose a decoration that represents children. The most popular of late has been geometric designs that ward off evil."

I studied my geometric designs. "I wanted to ward off evil?" Goosebumps rose where flurries of snow drifted down and touched my skin.

She shrugged.

"I've been married before, haven't I?"

She took in a sharp intake of breath, which turned into a cough. "I cannot say. You will have to draw your own conclusions from the evidence of your past, ne?" She bowed. "I beg leave of you. I have a headache and am unfit company."

I bowed in return and she left.

My past was full of surprises. First my sister, then Taishi and now marriage. How did it relate? Even when Nipa helped me sieve through my almost memories of Taishi that night, it grew no more clear. My feelings for him had been of love and sorrow, but never suspicion and hatred. As for my sister, the reflections were more complicated.

The flicker of firelight made shadows dance over his face. When Nipa kissed me, it took all my will to pull away. "What if I'm already married to Taishi?" I asked. "What then? I cannot kiss you and pretend I don't feel guilt."

Nipa stroked my hair and tucked my head under his chin. He held me in the security of his arms as I grew drowsy. My last thought before I drifted off was whether Lord Klark had been wrong about what had happened.

I was so wrapped up in my own problems, that I was caught off guard when Nipa woke me at dawn. "Felicity-chan, I need you to come with me. We have illness in our midst."
Chapter Eighteen

At some future period, not very distant as measured by centuries, the civilized races of man will almost certainly exterminate and replace the savage races throughout the galaxy.

—Charles Darwin, The Descent of the Species, 1854

I sat before the sick child. A woman applied a compress of snow and herbs to his forehead. Her cheeks were rosy and sweat dotted her forehead despite the chill of the air. She bowed upon seeing us.

I recognized the boy as one of the giggling children who had woken me many mornings with his friends. My heart dropped down to my stomach. He lay curled into a ball, moaning softly as he grabbed at his belly.

"We did this? We brought sickness here?" I asked. "But we came vaccinated. We made sure none of our people were carriers."

"His parents died of a similar fever five days ago. It is possible it was due to their contact with traders." Nipa bowed his head. "This boy is quarantined to stop the spread of the disease, but we don't know how to proceed."

That lessened my worry, but not by much. I was no doctor, but I examined him as best I could. The fever, sore throat and headache might be attributed to anything. "Tell me of his parents' conditions?"

The fever, sore throat and vomiting could be sundry diseases. If they had scarlet fever, typhoid, or smallpox, then I was immune, though none of the people in this village were.

"Who else has been exposed?"

Nipa swallowed. "My sister helped nurse the mother and father in their ill health."

Her face had been flushed and she had complained of a headache the night before. Surely she had been in contact with the rest of the village.

I looked at the old woman applying cloths to the boy's forehead. "Can you keep this woman and boy quarantined? Can Sumiko room nearby should she fall ill? They should have someone who is resistant to gaiyojin illness to care for them. I can do that."

The first epidemic had been my fault.

Taishi's illness came on suddenly. We already had been living on the planet for over a year and a half. He had little exposure to off-worlders, other than Faith and me, for I still kept him a secret from my father. One might have expected him to become sick in that time if he was going to, but it was only when I introduced a new element that he took ill. As our romance blossomed and he allowed me to kiss him, I passed on sickness.

Taishi said he was fine in the morning as he visited us in the valley riding chiramantep. I could tell right away he was tired from the dark circles under his eyes and his desire to sleep under a tree instead of swim, build mud huts, or tame animals. By afternoon he was feverish and vomiting. Being closer to our ship than the village, we half carried, half dragged him. The only reason he permitted us to take him there was because he was delirious.

Wasn't Father surprised to see us bring a native into our encampment? Dr. Smith was professional enough to take a blood sample and set to work despite my father's ranting at us. The doctor immediately concluded influenza was the cause. He carried Taishi into the sick unit.

"Why did you not tell me you had met savages?" my father demanded. "They could just as easily have given you disease as you did them. And that's not taking into account that they might have been hostile to our presence."

Faith said in a small voice, "I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't listen."

That took the air out of my father's vehemence. He sat between us girls and put an arm around Faith and me. "Oh, bother. I haven't listened very well, have I? I've been wrapped up in everything else."

"It's all right, Poppy," Faith said. "Shoko Nipa tells us that as long as you learn from your mistakes, and don't keep repeating them, it makes you a better person."

My father sighed. "And who, pray tell, is Shoko Nipa?"

"Taishi's mother. She's one of the Chiramantepjin people. Nipa is the word for a great leader, like an empress. We call her Mama Shoko when she chooses to be a mother instead of a leader."

He jumped to his feet. "Good lord, he's the leader's son? I'm going to have an entire village of savages descend on us if I don't do something about this."

By doing something, I thought he meant cure Taishi. What he meant was a mass of questions regarding the tribal people so he could look up the original colonists during the first age of space flight in his books and figure out which one Taishi's people might be. When he came to the Jomon section, he grunted.

He paced, muttering to himself, and then stopped to examine more text. "I suppose my next course of action is to send word to these people that we have their son in our care. The listing of phrases doesn't quite cover that, and even if it did, a language is bound to change after a thousand years."

"Father, Faith and I know how to speak in their tongue." More or less. I nodded to my sister. "You should take a chiramantep and go to the tree palace to tell his mother. I shall stay with Taishi."

Faith ran to the door to grab her bonnet on its hook.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Father said. "Just where do you think you're going? And what, may I ask, is a kooo maaa?"

Faith and I exchanged annoyed glances. After we had explained, he shook his head. "Most certainly not. I will not permit my daughters to ride wild beasts. And certainly not alone."

By now, fourteen hours had passed. I stayed by Taishi's side, holding his hand and speaking to him softly as he wove in and out of consciousness. Father, Mr. Price and one other man followed Faith to the edge of the cliff. They had only ascended part way down when the Chiramantepjin came riding across the valley on their chiramanteps. Shoko Nipa led the search party, dressed in full regalia. Not only did she wear her headdress and ornate blue and white belt, but her chiramantep was decked out in ornate ribbons and painted with white designs.

Faith served as translator and diplomat between the two cultures. When the Nipa arrived, I thought to step out, but Taishi's mother bid me to stay and pray to their ancestors with her for his health. She removed her furry blue headdress and stepped into the role of mother.

With their consent, the ship doctor took blood samples and inoculated those who came to our ship. He shook his head in disgust. "It's only a matter of time before others are sick. We've got to give everyone vaccines so no one can be carriers of disease." He pointed at me. "You did a selfish thing keeping these people secret. Imagine how many deaths you might have caused."

The shock of it rattled me to the core. "Can you prevent the other Chiramantepjin from getting sick?"

"Of course he can! He's only the most brilliant doctor in the galaxy," Miss Osborn said in her hoity toity way. She may have been biased since he was her second cousin. I would have believed her words too, except that she started sobbing. Father told me later than her own parents had died of an epidemic long ago.

I explained the problem I'd unwittingly caused to Shoko Nipa. Our care of Taishi and attention to prevent future illness warmed Shoko Nipa's heart. The doctor accompanied her back to the village to vaccinate the rest of their tribe. When Taishi was recovered and himself again, his parents returned, this time in bright costumes with festive feathers and their bodies painted with red dots. His mother came in her role as Chiramantepjin leader and bowed to my father. She asked, "Of all the treasures in my province, what can I give to you as thanks from my people?"

I don't know who was more surprised that my father should hold up the red stone and ask for more, the Nipa or Taishi. My friend rolled on the ground laughing. His chubby cheeks turned pink and tears rolled down his face. He was well enough by that point to be laughing that hard and his laugh made me laugh, though I didn't know why it was so funny. He simply had a way of infecting others with his mirth.

Whereas I had a way of infecting people with disease.

His mother's nose scrunched up in disgust. When she asked if my father jested, I translated for his benefit.

My father shook his head. "Not at all. We would like to find more. Do we ask for too much?"

Nipa threw up her hands in disgust. "If you knew where they came from, you wouldn't want them. We will collect them for you all the same."

She gave him forty-two stones of various sizes and hues of red. From that day forth, the tribe became dearest friends to my father and the crew. Though, when we visited in the village the stones were a joke among the Chiramantepjin.

From this incident and others in the years that followed, I was no stranger to disease. I now had the foresight to predict an epidemic. If only I wasn't too late.
Chapter Nineteen

Scenes of blood and cruelty are shocking to our ear and heart. What man has nerve to do, man has not nerve to hear.

―Harriet Beecher Stowe, Uncle Tom's Space Station

The stuffy heat of the Tanukijin sick room became oppressive as panic rose up in me.

"We need to get medicine for this boy. And this woman also will need medicine if she catches what he has." I said. I didn't want to make Nipa's worry worse, but he had to be made aware of all the factors. "I fear your sister has already contracted this disease. In the room you took me to the first night, there were gaijin tools. I need those medical supplies."

He nodded and left. A short time later, Meriwether came in with him, his arms loaded with cases and bundles. He wore a long nightshirt and nothing else. I turned my gaze away from his naked legs, not wanting him to feel uncomfortable.

Nipa stood in the doorway, arms crossed. He frowned and shook his head as if gaijin medicine was the last thing we needed. The room was already crowded and the old woman went into the hall. Out in the cold she coughed. My stomach clenched at the idea she would soon be sick like this boy.

Meriwether plopped the supplies down next to the child's bed. "What's this about an epidemic? Nipa bade me carry all our medical supplies down here." Meriwether leaned closer to me. "By the way, I think he speaks better English than he lets on."

I explained the situation.

Meriwether's usual bumbling evaporated. With expert precision, he put together a machine that would prick a finger and analyze the blood. He tested it on himself first to show Nipa how it worked. As expected, his analysis of himself came back clean. The boy's results showed he was positive for typhoid fever.

I covered my mouth, trying to contain my shock. Never in my time on the planet previously had typhoid fever been a problem.

I searched through the vials. We had antidotes and antibiotics. There were vaccines for hepatitis, pox, herpes, and others.

"Which one do we use?" I asked.

Meriwether shook his head. "None of these are for this bacteria. Typhoid bacillus is highly contagious. It only kills twenty percent of adults, but. . . ." He frowned at the child curled up in agony. "We need to go to the ship to get vaccines. And someone needs to stay with those who are ill. All in our party have been vaccinated against typhoid. You should stay and care for this child."

Still standing in the doorway, Nipa nodded.

I looked to him and said in Jomon, "Meriwether and Charbonneau need to travel back to where the ship landed and fetch the medicines. Do you think they can make it in this weather? We can then administer the medicines to the Tanukijin so they won't become ill."

Nipa turned away without answer. I followed him into the hall. He paced the length of the dark expanse. I grabbed his hand. "Speak to me."

"I don't trust the men in your party to come back," he said. "I would rather go myself."

"There is only one man at the ship, and he will not let you in. Take Meriwether with you. He will return if I'm here. You can trust him."

He took me by the shoulders. "Do you not see? It benefits the gaijin if my people die." He used the impolite label for my people. All traces of diplomacy were gone and I saw his true anger now that the mask of politeness was removed. "Your Klark Nipa cannot be trusted. Do you know what he did to this planet? He would exterminate us all to plant new people on this world given the chance. Do you think his son is different?"

I didn't know what Lord Klark had done, but it wasn't true he would exterminate those on the planet if he could. The United Worlds of America and British Empire of Planets treaties didn't allow prospectors to lay claim to inhabited worlds. They were to report indigenous peoples so that diplomats could establish peaceful relationships for trade and commerce—and leave the people of the planet alone should they wish it. Nipa's comment nagged at my conscience, but I had no time to ponder matters of diplomacy at the moment.

I said, "If the weather holds, we can call the ship and tell them our location. It would be quicker and—"

"No! That ship will not come to my province." He was even more vehement about this. "Ships have weapons that can kill."

I stared into his eyes. "A gaiyojin must accompany you to the ship or you will not be given access to the medicines. Let me go with you. Do you trust me to return with you? Do you trust me not to let your people die?"

He gave me a curt nod.

I assumed the ship would be waiting where we had left it, though finding it in the endless expanse of snowfall would be the greater challenge.

We set out, bundled in furs and wearing leather goggles with slits in the eyepieces to keep us from going blind in the brilliantly bright world. The sunlight reflecting off the snow was dazzling even with the goggles. I rode atop my own chiramantep and led Nipa on his to the ship. The wind blew so hard it whispered its way under my furs and shifted my goggles so that I had to hold them with mitten-covered fingers to keep them in place lest I go blind. I could see how even the sun was an enemy in this land of winter.

The chiramanteps' feet crunched through the top layer of ice and into the powdery drifts, burying them up to their chests and slowing their speed. My beast, the smaller of the two, struggled to keep up. I was thankful for their warmth.

Several times we stopped to allow the animals to rest. When the sun sank behind dark clouds and the horizon and sky blended together into a gray gloom, I lost my bearings. Everything looked the same and I wondered if I was leading us astray.

Nipa pointed to a spot on the horizon. "That is your ship, no?"

"Maybe," I said.

The snow thinned and in some of the thinner drifts we saw hints of plants and ground. When the snow started to come down in flurries again, Nipa bid us to push our beasts faster. In a matter of minutes, the initial flakes grew in size and number. The wind picked up and the sky darkened. My ears ached in the cold, even with my warm tanuki hat. The scarf across my nose and mouth froze to my face. My limbs felt heavier as we moved and my clothes stiffened where snow had melted and refrozen. The pocket watch against my belly within my furs burned with cold.

I could no longer see the ship, but Nipa kept us going. He pointed to our left and I followed. I didn't realize how close we were until I saw the wall of metal in front of us.

Nipa shouted over the howl of wind. "Can the chiramantep rest and be given food and water where it's warm?"

I could only imagine what Captain Ford would say about wild animals being brought aboard his ship. I would have to deal with that later.

We circled around to the back where the bay doors were. I left him so that I could go within and open them. I entered the code next to the arch of a gothic doorway. Stepping inside the heated ship was a welcome relief from the cold.

The tap-tap of footsteps on the metal grate of the ship floor sounded as a man approached. Mr. Foster stopped in his tracks upon seeing me stomp the snow off my boots in the entryway. He spilled his coffee across his hand, not even seeming to notice. "What in the blazes?" One of the peculiar quirks about the crewman was his immense handlebar mustache, which had a tendency to twitch when he was nervous, such as at times like these.

"It's me, Miss Earnshaw," I said through the furs muffling my face. "I need you to open the shuttle bay doors."

"Where's Captain Ford? And Mr. Klark? I thought something must have happened to you in the storm, but then the captain called me and told me he thought you might be able to make this a successful mission even if—"

"How did he—never mind. Open the bay doors." When he didn't move, I poked him in the chest with a gloved hand. "Now."

My furs left melting puddles of water in my wake. I met Nipa at the doors and guided the chiramantep inside. They shook off their bright blue pelts, making them look like the fuzzballs I remembered from my youth. One of them tried to gnaw on a bulkhead. Another urinated on the floor.

Mr. Foster stared dumbfound. For once his mustache was perfectly still.

"Set out some food and water for them. But don't get too close. They'll tear you apart and eat your insides if they don't know you," I said.

Mr. Foster's mustache twitched.

I left him in the doorway of the cargo bay and walked down the corridor. I threw off my hat and mittens and unwound the part of my scarf that wasn't stuck to my face.

"Slowly," said Nipa. "You will take off chunks of flesh if you aren't careful."

I couldn't stand wasting more time. Our journey had taken us hours. We had more ahead of us if we were to return in a timely manner.

He helped me out of my jacket and snow pants, and left the scarf for last. By that point enough of the ice had melted for me to remove it. I was exhausted and more than anything I wanted to sit in the heated water of the onsen in the Tanukijin palace, but now wasn't time for rest. I immediately went to the medical room. Nipa stared at his warped reflection in the metal walls and squinted at the unnatural lights.

The room smelled harsh and pungent from chemicals and cleaners. After the natural aroma of wood and people and earth in the cliff palace, the medical room left an itch deep inside my nose.

I made a pile of supplies. I scrounged for antibiotics, anti-virals and vaccines, and dragged the heavy machine we needed for creating more vaccines. "We need bags to carry these in," I said, more to myself than to him.

I didn't know if he had a way to strap the vaccine-making machine to a chiramantep. If I was to make more vaccines, that would take time. And what if I guessed incorrectly and brought the wrong ones? I had never studied medicine like Meriwether.

"How much time do we have?" I asked. "Will we bring the supplies back with the chiramantep as soon as they're rested?"

Nipa kneeled on the floor before the pile, his shoulders sagging. "We must wait until the storm is over. We will lose time, but there is no choice."

"Oh." I, too, felt defeated now. "Shall I offer you refreshments? I can give you a room to rest."

He offered me a half smile. "Yes, I will accept your hospitality."

Mr. Foster grumbled as he assisted with dinner. "I'm not a kitchen hand. I'm an officer. Tea and dinner are woman's work."

I gave him my iciest stare and he returned to warming up stew in the oven unit. By then I had redressed in an extra day gown from my room. Lacing the corset up on my own meant the fit was off and I hid my unseemly middle with a jacket, despite the warmth of the room.

We heated the captain's private provisions of rehydrated beef stew, bread thawed from the freezer and cherry cobbler for dessert.

"The captain will be furious when he finds out what you've done." Mr. Foster pinched the ends of his handlebar mustache into points. "Especially to provide dinner for a savage."

"Our esteemed guest is a nipa. He is like an emperor. He treated our party with the highest courtesy and hospitality. It is only fitting we should do the same and give him our best."

Mr. Foster grunted and glanced at our guest again on the monitor where he sat in the mess hall. Nipa's back was stiff and he looked out of his element. If only he would remove his tanuki mask he would look more human and approachable. But I supposed if ever there was a time he might feel the need to be formal and perform his role as leader, it would be in the den of those he assumed were his enemies.

At dinner, Nipa ate the stew with relish. He tasted the cherry cobbler, though only managed a few bites. When he didn't think I was watching, he spat the coffee back into the cup. I covered my smile with my napkin.

I turned to the crewman. "Now tell me, Mr. Foster, how did the captain call you? I didn't think he had a communication device with him."

Mr. Foster glanced at Nipa picking apart his bread and back to me. His mustache bobbed as his lips twisted back and forth underneath. "He had it hidden upon his person in a place I dare not mention in the company of a lady. I, er, how does the party fair? Was there trouble? It sounds like there was trouble. Is that why you're here?"

"Yes, the first was brought on by the storm. The last trouble was brought on by disease, which is why we must bring medicine back." I didn't know how he'd react to the middle trouble that I left out about the death of at least a dozen men he'd gotten to know on the long voyage to the planet. He said nothing about it, so I hoped the captain hadn't been able to communicate this detail.

Mr. Foster tried to offer polite conversation, but he couldn't bring himself to look upon Nipa. For the Jomon, this meant he showed respect. I knew otherwise. From the amount of nervous mustache bobbing happening, it didn't surprise me when Mr. Foster excused himself early from supper.

We had no extra rooms aboard, so I decided my room would be best to offer Nipa and I would take Meriwether's. I showed him how star men slept in beds high off the ground and our use of the water closets for privies.

Nipa studied the pink lace covering the bed and the frills of the duvet. "What kind of animal does this come from?"

I laughed. "It's all human crafted. The fibers are sewn together to make it look that way."

His gaze darted to the framed watercolor paintings on the wall, to the striped wall paper, and to the crocheted doilies on the imitation wood dresser. "This is where you live? It is different from what I imagined."

"It was decorated by Meriwether's housekeeper, not me. Is it too, um, feminine for you?"

"You misunderstand my meaning. I don't disapprove. Only, I am unused to such gaiyojin homes." Nipa bowed. "I will be happy to sleep in your bed."

I laughed. "I did say I'm going to sleep in the room next to this, yes?"

"You are welcome to change your mind."

I showed him how to work the handles in the water closet to take a cold shower.

What Nipa didn't understand was our lack of privacy. The surveillance cameras of the ship not only saw any movement outside our rooms but would also record it. I could only imagine how incriminating it would be if I went unchaperoned into the private chamber where a supposed "savage" slept. I made sure he had need of nothing before I retired and fell into an exhausted sleep.

My eyelids felt like sandpaper when I woke. My muscles ached and my back was stiff. I drank a glass of water and checked the time. Daylight wasn't for many hours yet, but I covered myself with my wrap and padded down the halls to check on the chiramantep. They'd settled down in the darkest corner of the cargo bay. One of them moaned pathetically. I didn't blame him. I dimmed the lights. I hadn't considered they would need darkness, but now it only seemed natural. Mr. Foster must have been asleep, for the bridge was empty.

The snow still raged on.

I retired to Meriwether's room again. A squeak escaped my lips when I realized Nipa sat on my bed. Only the light from the desk across the room remained on. I saw Nipa's naked face more clearly in the white light than I had seen it before. His features were well-proportioned, his nose an elegant slope like so many other Jomon. His cheekbones were high and well-placed. Even across the room I noticed how handsome he was, despite his age.

I cleared my throat and bowed.

"Do not bow to me. You are my equal."

I remained in the doorway, uncertain how to proceed.

"Please, sit with me. I cannot sleep in this place. There are strange noises and stranger silences, ne?" He held out his hand to me.

I hesitated. If Mr. Foster caught us in my room together he was sure to make a fuss. Meriwether might or might not react, considering he was part of the wife-swap himself, but I had no idea how Lord Klark would take it that his future daughter-in law had spent time unchaperoned with a "savage." Again. I could only imagine what Charbonneau would tell him he had witnessed on the planet. Only now that I was staring at this foreign sight of a Jomon in the familiar world I had lived in for the past seven years, did I feel the full weight of my actions.

I bethought myself of my very first conversation with Lord Klark and his advice to keep my unchaperoned times with the Jomon a secret, lest the polite society of the British Empire shun me. Even under his care, some had treated me as a curiosity, others a pariah. At his many balls on the space station, he invited the most elite families in the galaxy, though he spared me from attending due to my delicate disposition. At the time I had thought he had understood my dislike of crowds and he genuinely cared about what I wanted. But after learning he'd kept knowledge of my inheritance from me, I distrusted his motives. More likely I'd been an embarrassment to him. The Jeffersons, cousins of my mother, had visited his station once. Because they loathed the sight of me so deeply, Lord Klark had suggested I not attend that ball, as the mere sight of me might spur their anger.

I didn't want to cause Lord Klark problems with one of the most prominent American families when politics were already strained between the British and the U.W.A. Meriwether had refused to attend if I wasn't going, and spent the entire evening with me in my room playing chess. He wasn't very good at the game, but he knew I liked it and was willing to play for my sake. He wasn't a bad person. Any other young lady would have been envious he'd bestowed his interest on me. He was a logical choice for marriage. Only he just wasn't . . . Taishi? Was that the reason I'd never allowed myself to love him?—Some part of me knew I was already married.

And then there was Hoku Nipa who had taught me to love again. My heart ached. I didn't know whom I wanted. Nor could I decide until I resolved my past.

I might not have loved Meriwether the way I did Nipa, but it didn't mean I wanted to make choices that would hurt him and cause his family shame.

Nipa sat, waiting for my response. Finally, I said, "Can I interest you in a tour of the ship?"

"I do not like your harsh lights. They sting the eyes like sunlight on a plateau of snow. I need my goggles to leave this room."

I laughed at his analogy. "Let me fix that." In the hallway I set the lighting controls to dim the hallways and rooms I intended to take him to.

Nipa didn't step outside my room. "It is night outside, yes? This is still too bright for this hour. This artificial daylight will confuse my body." I programmed a thirty percent reduction in light but he shook his head.

I reduced it another twenty-five percent, more as a jest than because I thought it would be to his liking. With this setting he at least ventured out. "This will do."

I patted his cheek. "Indeed? I think at this rate I will never have the chance to swoon over my geari husband's face." I meant it as a joke, for there was no name in English for a temporary husband and the word for social obligation in Jomon was the closest I could come.

His smile vanished. He held my hand to his cheek. I stared into his black eyes, seeing sorrow and something else I couldn't place. His eyes were the kind one could fall into and never want to leave.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I don't always know the correct words."

He squeezed my hand. "And sometimes your clever tongue finds the right meaning regardless."

Our tour started in the kitchen with a midnight snack and moved on to each of the closets, storage rooms, quarters and bridge. Nipa studied every riveted seam on the ship's steel walls, the double-plated, three-inch-thick windows, and the grates on the floor in the hallway. He was fascinated by the workings of our lighting, heat, air conditioning and refrigeration.

"I had forgotten this is what your world is like. So full of magic," he said. "It's no wonder a gaiyojin would want to return to it so badly."

I wasn't sure about that. "There certainly are conveniences onboard. But we take a lot for granted. We have machines and automatons to do our bidding and that frees our time to spend it fretting over trivial matters like acquiring more rosettes for our gowns or asteroids to build colonies on."

He patted the metal wall. "Or mines to build more ships like this, ne?"

I stared at my warped reflection, a blonde woman dressed in a ruffled nightgown and housecoat who didn't resemble the person I thought I was.

When I showed him the ship's engines under the bridge, I pointed at the cogs and gears, the boiler and the steam chamber. He gravitated to the laser in the glass casing in the wall. At the focal point was a pea-sized, red diamond faceted in a cut that ended in a sharp point.

He inclined his head at the stone. "It's so small. It's what Meriwether Nipa wants, yes?"

I nodded. Only this one was from the Orion colony's mining operations.

"He wants it as a tool for your ship's weapons?" he asked.

"He doesn't personally. But others do. How'd you know?"

"You also wondered how I knew about kissing. I'm ever the diplomat, remember?" He pressed his palms against the glass, squinting at the machine within the encasement. "Why does this stone work and not a smooth one?"

I flipped on a light switch to illuminate the laser. "I don't understand, work for what?"

"For the weapon. Why can a smooth stone not work?"

"It has to do with light refraction." Although such subjects were considered unfit for a young lady, I had been drawn to science when the tutor covered such subjects in Meriwether's education, mostly I suspect because it was forbidden. Lord Klark always suggested I stick to embroidery or the pianoforte with his daughters. Meriwether had been the one to leave electronic book cards out where I could poach them.

Nipa tapped the glass wall. "It's very small. Can you tell me what would happen if a larger one was used in the place of this one here?"

I swallowed. I sensed he meant something deeper with his inquiry. "It would be more powerful. It could create more damage." If it was cut correctly. If it wasn't, the beam might not be focused enough or light might go somewhere unexpected.

I stared at the laser and for the briefest of moments I experienced deja vu. Before me I saw another laser with a large, round diamond like the one Taishi had given me. In the distant fog of my mind, I sank into a sense of desperation and fear. Great pain and anguish washed over me. My head spun. I blinked and the image was gone. My knees wobbled.

Nipa caught my arm. "You are tired and I am keeping you from resting."

He circled an arm around my waist. I was more tired than he knew. Not just in body, but in mind. I was tired of my life not being my own, of having to live between two worlds where I belonged to neither. I was tired of other people deciding my fate and telling me how I would live, whom I would marry, and what I was to wear.

I wanted to be free of my cage.

Nipa escorted me to my own bed. "Rest. We have more hours before it is safe to travel."

"Truly, Hoku, I'm not that tired." I threw off my slippers and sat on my bed anyway. He looked wearier than I felt.

"I know what will make you sleepy," he said.

I crossed my arms, thinking he meant to say memory moss or some such thing, but instead he strode over to my dresser where I kept my hair brush. He untied the ribbon from my long braid and loosened the plaits. I tucked myself under the blankets while he brushed my hair. This did relax me just as it had when Faith and I had brushed each other's hair long ago. Taishi used to watch in awe, as our hair was so different from his own. He used to tell me he wished to cut off my braid and steal it so he could have it for himself. It was one of his many jests to make me laugh.

I closed my eyes and leaned against Nipa. I didn't remember falling asleep but I must have. I opened my eyes to find his arms around me. He spooned against me. The steady rhythm of his breath made me feel secure. For a short time, I forgot to worry.

Nipa held the canvas bag open as I arranged the boxes of syringes and vials of vaccines within. I knelt as close to the bag as possible, for my corset wouldn't allow me much movement. It was so uncomfortable after having been without it for days. One taste of freedom had ruined me.

Mr. Foster leaned against the doorframe watching for a time before he excused himself to attend to "ship's duties." I suppose he might have felt some reservation leaving a lady unchaperoned with a man he considered a savage—though not so concerned that he would miss lunch for it.

Every time I gazed out the window, the snow still fell. Time was being wasted. My inability to do anything was maddening.

"Are you sure we can't fly the ship closer to your palace?" I asked. "We would still have to wait out the storm, but after that it would save us time. We could bring more supplies too." I nodded to the vaccine machine.

He looked up, eyes wide with hope. "Can you fly this ship?"

"No. I've never flown. But Mr. Foster has a pilot's license." I flicked my long braid over my shoulder and smoothed stray hairs out of my face before packing another box of vaccines in the bag.

Nipa shook his head. "That will not do. Your people will then know where mine reside." He paced the floor. "We must wait and then take the chiramantep."

"But we already know where your people live. You took Meriwether, Captain Ford and Mr. Charbonneau to your palace."

"Yes, during a whiteout. Do you think they will have any idea how to return to the ship—if we allow them to return at all? The elders have listened to my idea to bring them back blindfolded, but the matter hasn't yet been decided. It's bad enough they know we live. Gaijin will now search until they find us to kill us."

I sighed in exasperation. "That isn't the way it works. The British Empire of Planets and United Worlds of America have a system in place. When a planet is discovered to have colonists from the five original tribes living on it—or any indigenous peoples of unknown origin that we find—we are to report our findings to our government. They send diplomats and protect your planet from colonization. They want peaceful relations." Or so my father had said. My mother's parents had been important leaders in the government of the United Worlds. Even if my father despised his in-laws for the pain they had caused my mother, I had heard him on more than one occasion proclaim how they protected the cultures of indigenous people. It was the same with the alien suffrage movement in British Empire.

I stared into the polished metal of the infirmary walls, a warped reflection of myself staring back. I had never met any of the Jeffersons to know if they truly were the advocates my parents had claimed. Even so, I despised them for the way they had disowned us all. Could it be that they were so spiteful they would wish to see this world destroyed because my father had been the one to survey it? Or had he not reported that the planet was inhabited?

Nipa set a box down with a thud. "Diplomats? Like Nipa Klark? Since when is tearing up our planet and killing my people diplomacy and peace? When my people don't kill first, we regret it later. The hatred of gaijin is so great that most of my people wish we killed all those from the Santa Maria the first time aliens came to this province."

The horror of the statement stole across me. "So the rumors are true. Is that why you kill all gaijin now? You massacre every ship that lands?"

"Do you truly think we have the means to destroy starships? It is always the gaijin fighting amongst themselves that saves us from facing as many foes. Just as the bigger tanuki eat the smaller raccoon dogs, bigger ships destroy the smaller ships. How many of those bigger ships do you suppose are Klark Nipa's? We only kill for survival. He kills for lust."

I rose. "What are you implying about my future father-in-law?"

"I need not imply. I tell you outright that your Klark Nipa is an evil man. He hunts us so he might have this world to himself. His son is no better. He probably brought disease here on purpose."

My anger flared and I found myself shouting. "How dare you say such things about the people who have cared for me! You are a liar."

"I speak the truth. I can show you my memories of his deeds." He snapped the pouch he wore around his neck and emptied the contents of green powder into his hand. He spat into the mound and rubbed his hands together.

I stepped back. "No. I will not perform memory exchange with you." Not in anger. It felt too dangerous, too vile and unclean after all the happy times we'd shared.

"Then you will never know. You will not have the chance to refute my claims and you will always wonder if I was right."

I hesitated. I needed the memory moss on my own hands in order to give him memories. If he gave me his own memories, I had nothing to lose . . . if I was right and Lord Klark was innocent. I didn't want to think about what it meant if I wasn't.

He held his hands palms up as he stepped closer. My shoulders hunched up automatically and my spine stiffened at the realization I had to undress in front of him here in the ship. There was nowhere for him to place his hands if I didn't. I unfastened the bone buttons on the front of my blouse and shrugged it down enough to expose my back. He circled his arms around me, taking care not to smear green into my braid. He rested his palms above my shoulder blades.

The pleasant tingle wasn't as intoxicating as the bed of moss we had shared ourselves in, but it still made me lightheaded and calm. I closed my eyes, sinking deeper into myself and then into someone else. The darkness opened up and I was in the jungle as it once had been. The humid air pressed in on my skin and the sound of nose birds trumpeted to each other in greeting. A feathered raptor snake slithered through the air ahead of me, chasing after the smaller birds. The air smelled green, but tainted with smoke. I watched through the leaves of a lacy fern as a gaijin plowing a field was stopped by another in uniform. The uniformed man argued with the other over claims to the land on the planet. Another gaijin in uniform drew a laser pistol and shot the farmer. I watched in frozen horror as men in uniforms burned the home of the settler, his family trapped inside.

The memory slipped away. I sank deeper into the blackness to find myself watching a large ship hovering in the sky. It rained down laser beams at a smaller ship attempting to take off. It exploded and peppered fire over the forest. The screeches of tanuki in pain rose over the crash of trees. The air smelled of burnt meat and chemicals. My stomach churned.

I ran through the forest, away from the ship and the fire.

The darkness enveloped me again. For the briefest of moments, I thought I was coming back to myself. I was able to reason that this destruction was horrible, but it had nothing to do with Lord Klark.

I slipped deeper into the past. My chest tightened in anger and I found it difficult to breathe. I gripped a spear in my hand. High in an umbrella tree I crouched above the gaijin men. A man in a top hat and a monocle surveyed the land. Even with his hair still brown rather than speckled with gray, I recognized him as Lord Klark.

He stood at the edge of the cliff overlooking the valley of chiramantep below. "If only Clementine had lived to see this world. She and I could have ruled here happily."

A man in uniform half carried, half dragged an injured man to Lord Klark. From the red whiskers waxed into neat curls and his bushy sideburns, I recognized Mr. Price right away. He had served on the Santa Maria.

Mr. Klark raised an eyebrow. "You've disappointed me, Mr. Price. I thought you meant to keep me informed about the assets of this world. You mentioned nothing about treasure, only the natives."

Lord Klark held up a stone as red as the blood dribbling out of Mr. Price's leg. It took a moment for me to notice the belt around his leg. His foot was missing.

Lord Klark nodded to the man in uniform. "Leave us."

The guard dumped Mr. Price onto the ground. The crewman tried to sit up and failed. He lifted his head and reached out toward the standing man. "Water. Please, my lord."

Lord Klark lit a cigar. "I came to this world to settle a debt and what do I find instead? You've gone native and changed alliances. I cannot have an employee double crossing me, now can I?" He puffed out smoke rings.

"I didn't change alliances. I was always true to you. Always, my lord."

"And yet you defied me and sent word to the United Worlds that this planet was inhabited."

"No, not me, Lord Klark. It was Mr. Earnshaw. I couldn't convince him—"

"Don't lie to me. Your name was on the interstellar message." He grabbed the man's face, smushing his fingers into his cheeks. "Did you not think I would have friends within the United Worlds who work for me as well? Or did you think my influence only reached within the British Empire?"

Mr. Price closed his eyes, his mouth turning slack. Lord Klark struck him in the face. Mr. Price opened his eyes and sucked in a breath.

"I can forgive some of your trespasses, but the matter that concerns me the most is the treasure. You told me there were laser grade diamonds. Where are they? It isn't too late to tell me. The ship surgeon can still reattach your foot."

Mr. Price made a choking noise. He spat in Lord Klark's face and closed his eyes again. Mr. Price shuddered and his breath came rattling out of him.

The ferocious cry Lord Klark made would have rivaled any chiramantep. "Tell me!" he demanded. He kicked at the unconscious man, but he couldn't be roused. When shaking didn't work, he grabbed Mr. Price by the shirt and hefted him over the cliff. A string of curses left his lips.

My heart beat wildly in my chest. I hated this man with a fury I had never felt for any person before. He'd killed my people, stolen my beloved from me, and would kill more people before he left.

He was alone and unprotected by his guards. I raised my spear.

"Father?" a small voice asked from below.

A fair-skinned boy of no more than fifteen edged out of the trees. He carried a bouquet of flowers. "Is everything all right?"

"What are you doing out here? I told my men to keep you in the ship."

"You told them William and I could come out to view the sunset."

Lord Klark cleared his throat. "So I did." He wiped his hands on the ferns near his feet.

The boy went on. "And since Miss Felicity is confined to bed rest, I decided to pick her flowers."

Felicity. My heart clenched at the name. I could wait no longer. I aimed my spear at the gaijin's heart. The leaves of the tree rustled as I threw. Lord Klark looked up and ducked just in time, pushing his son down. He aimed his laser pistol at the trees, shooting blindly. One beam seared my arm and I fought to keep from screaming out. Tree branches caught fire above me. I lost my grip on the tree and fell. I landed hard on my feet, one of my ankles giving out. Pain shot up my leg as I stepped, but fleeing was my only option. Agony lanced through my body with every step.

The memory slipped away. The pain faded into a dull ache in my leg and arm. Finally all I was aware of was the pleasant tingle of the memory moss on my back. My breath came out in ragged huffs and my body seized with trembling. I felt dirty inside and wanted to cleanse the horror of the memories from my mind. It took a moment to understand why my surroundings smelled like sterile chemicals instead of ume trees and earth. I blinked my eyes open against the harsh light.

I kneeled on the white tile floor of the infirmary. My cheek lay against a shoulder of solid muscle. I dug my fingers into soft fur. Hands held me closer, stroking my back. The sensation was pleasant, oddly arousing after all the dark scenes I'd witnessed. The side effects of memory moss were the last sensations I wanted at the moment. I drew away, landing on my behind.

"What did you see?" he asked.

He would have no memory. He would have to trust me to tell him what he'd given me.

"I saw death."

At last I understood.
Chapter Twenty

If you do not enter the tanuki's cave, you cannot catch its cub.

—Ancient Jomon proverb

I thought back to my every memory of Lord Klark and how my current knowledge made his motivations clear. I was valuable for my fortune, yes, but only if I stayed in his care so that his son married me. All those parties he'd held where I was ushered off before my relatives could shun me; the time I'd seen my grandparents across the theatre and caught them gazing at me with their opera glasses, only for me to be escorted away before the first act had even started; the way he'd "sheltered" me from prying eyes who might gossip—it hadn't been to protect me. It was to protect him and his assets.

Aynu-Mosir was only valuable to miners, settlers, and slave traders so long as the United Worlds and the British Empire of Planets didn't know it was inhabited. Leaving my guardian's care meant I might make my knowledge of the planet known—something he couldn't keep secret if I didn't marry his son and remain under his supervision. It would only be a matter of time before he would surely arrange for me to have an accident after that. Likely after I'd given his son a few heirs to carry on their line.

I bit my lip, considering all this and more. There was so much to summarize for Nipa in these memories. "Lord Klark was behind the attack on the Chiramantepjin village. He knew the tribal leaders would be meeting there because Mr. Price was his informant." I wondered what had ever become of Miss Osborn. Had she known? Had she died in the attack? A tugging of almost memory crept over me. There were few other women who came to this planet. Had Nipa's wife been Miss Osborn? Or another settler? I shook my head.

"You finally understand Klark Nipa's nature."

"Why didn't you show me this sooner? This is the first thing you should have told me—or showed me. Why did you wait until now?"

He placed an arm around me and brushed a stray strand of hair out of my face with the back of his hand. "I told you only moments ago and you did not believe me. And this was after you had grown to know me, and I like to think, to trust me. Think how you would have reacted that first day if I had shown you. You didn't even want to permit me to exchange memories with you."

I nodded, understanding the wisdom of his words. I loathed how I was like my father, unwilling to listen to others.

There was something else I had seen, but my thoughts were jumbled in confusion. He had recognized my name. He knew me? Ice prickled down my spine.

"Do you understand why I insisted on the wife-swap now? You are one of the few living gaijin whom Jomon once trusted. I did not know the nature of your character when you came to this planet with Meriwether-san, but I had hope you were the same. I knew if there was one I could show the truth to, it would be you, and you might know what to do." He cradled my head against his chest. "There are many more memories I will need to share with you, ne? But they are not the sweet ones of love and joy as I have given you in our times together. I must show you more tragedy so you will truly understand." He kissed my forehead, sorrow speaking in his frame, in the tight line of his lips, and the tremor in his tone. "When you return with me, I will give you more of what I hold inside me. I will take you to my chamber and you will know what I know. Until then, I must share one more memory with you."

He picked up the fallen pouch and emptied the remaining traces of green powder into his hand. He tried to spit into the dust but his mouth was dry. I spat into his hands. He bowed his head.

After the last memory, I had a suspicion, but I needed him to confirm it. I didn't want to utter my hopes, only to have them crushed.

He circled his arms around me and held one hand to my chest just above the collar of my chemise. As I looked up into his eyes I knew I trusted him implicitly. He had exposed every lie I had believed, and there was something about that which gave me more comfort than the gentleness of his touch or his concern for me. I continued staring into the black depths of his eyes as the darkness overpowered me.

The jungle rose up all around me. The smell of wet earth and dusky trees wafted like perfume through the heavy air. Immediately I felt at home in this memory and at home in this body. I was myself.

Nose birds zipped through the rainbow of flowers, and tree snails chittered above our heads. There was nowhere else I wanted to be more. I ran, free for the moment. I picked up the hem of my dress lest I trip like my sister.

"Slow down," Faith said, giggling as she chased after me.

I took her by the hand, so I wouldn't leave her behind. I turned my face toward her to see her smile and then turned back to the path ahead.

Something large swung toward me and I ducked back. Taishi swung upside down from a tree, startling both of us. Faith fell onto her behind and whimpered.

I laughed and shook my head at Taishi. "Always the trickster?"

Faith wailed. I patted my sister on the back. "Look, it's just Taishi."

Faith's shouts startled a flock of nose birds that darted from their hiding places and flew off. "Why must you always play jokes on me? Look what you did! You made me dirty my dress!"

"Such a cry baby! How old are you? Ten?" Taishi said.

"I'm thirteen!"

He imitated her crying.

This made her cry even louder. Tree snails twittered with anxiety. He tugged on one of her braids. "Oh, shush."

I slapped his hand away. "You aren't helping. You must be nice to Faith—even when I'm not—and treat her like your own little sister."

"I do. That's why I tease her, ne?"

"Well, maybe your little sister doesn't want you to tease her and make her cry either. Promise me you won't make Faith cry. Please."

He nodded, his cheery expression solemn for once. He took Faith's little hands in his. "Sorry, little sister. Forgive me?"

She nodded and dried her eyes on her sleeves. "If only you were a true gentleman who carried a handkerchief."

I was relieved Taishi didn't answer. I rolled my eyes and handed her my own.

He took up my hands now and stared into my eyes. "Angry?" he asked. I suspected he apologized to Faith for my benefit more than hers.

I shook my head. "I'm not angry."

He tugged Faith to her feet. She stretched out her arms and he groaned. "I'm not your chiramantep." He allowed her to climb onto his back anyway, and he carried her to the cliff.

"Will we ride real chiramantep again today? I want the baby one. He's small like me," she said.

I wondered if the chiramantep would be enough to distract my sister. Would I have to take Faith with me into the women's hut where Taishi's mother was bound to be? Just thinking of the Jomon words I would say, and inevitably the way I would fumble the meanings, made me nervous. What if she told me I couldn't have her son for my betrothed? I was certain she would tell me I was too young. Or she would ask me what my father said and I would have to admit I hadn't spoken with him yet. Or she would refuse because I was a gaijin and I had no soul like the elders whispered.

It still hurt when I bethought what the elders had said of us on our last visit.

My vision dimmed. I held onto the image of the forest and clung to where I had been, but it was over all too soon.

I slipped back into myself. The memory had been my own. I blinked awake, the sterile room grating against my senses. I closed my eyes against the harsh light. Nipa rocked me back and forth as though I were a child. I was so relaxed I didn't want to question how he had come to possess my memory to give it back to me. I didn't want to think about my sister. The world was too cozy to think deeply.

He kissed my hair and face. The minutes slipped by and the drowsy allure of the memory moss faded.

"I will return the rest of your memories when we are home," he said.

The weight of his words sank in. He would return my memories.

I sat up. "You have my memories?" The meaning of what I had just experienced came back to me. My stomach clenched. All and sundry emotions welled up inside me: relief, anger, fear and hope. I stared into his black eyes and smoothed a hand over his jaw. I searched his face for some resemblance to the boy I had once known, but found he was too different to recognize. There were no round cheeks, nor the constant smile. Nor could I even picture Taishi's face in my mind.

"There is a reason I have kept your memories safe, but not for any of the reasons you had guessed." He swallowed. "I think 'trauma' is the right word for what you experienced. I couldn't stand to see you in pain. You asked me to help you. I did in the only way I knew how." He smoothed his hands up and down the tattooed surface of my arms.

I wasn't sure if he referred to the attack or a different matter. I remembered the blood and the pain I'd been in when Lord Klark had first found me. Someone had injured me. Looking into the black pools of sorrow in Nipa's—Taishi's—eyes, I couldn't imagine he had been the one to harm me.

He had been the boy I loved and the man I had come to love again.

I stared at the double bands just below my elbows. "You and I married long ago."

He nodded.

"When I arrived here at your cliff palace, how long before you knew it was me?" I asked.

"The first moment I saw you. Your face is unchanged. Horiuchi, the leader of the hunting team who found you, told me he recognized you. The warriors might have killed your entire party had you not been in it."

It broke my heart that the trust between our peoples was so shattered that it was safer to shoot first and ask questions later rather than the reverse. But after seeing the horror of his own memories, I understood why.

"I was surprised that you should not know me," he said. "I thought when we spoke in private you would admit you knew it was me. That first meeting I had thought to embrace you and proclaim my love for you all over again, but then I realized you didn't know me. And it looked as though you were in love with another man. I planned to tell you who I was the following day after I had time to recover, but once I realized you thought I had stolen your memories and done something horrible to you, I was afraid you wouldn't listen."

I traced the shape of his plump lips and square chin. He didn't resist when I tugged off the tanuki mask in the bright light of the medical room. Even if I had seen his face, I wouldn't have known it. He had changed so much, not just with the lines of age around the eyes and mouth, but the shape of his jaw was now defined. The bridge of his nose was thicker and I could see in the harsh light the asymmetry that suggested it had been broken. A scar marred one cheek, etching a pink line into his hair. No longer was he a thin, lanky boy with a round face, but a man whose muscles had filled out.

The biggest difference was the easy smile I had once seen so often, now replaced with grief caused by years of hardship.

My breath caught in my throat. This was not the man I had left seven years before. "How is it that you have aged so much?" I immediately regretted the bluntness of my words, for it sounded like I was saying he was old or ugly, which wasn't my intention.

He laughed and shook his head. "How is it that you stayed so young? Faith says it has to do with star travel. Your time is different."

"Faith! Where is my sister?"

"Safe and in hiding. She will come to you after you have all your memories, but no sooner. She has her own secrets to keep and wishes you to know your own before you would hear hers."

That was suspiciously vague. When I thought of Faith, guilt and anxiety blossomed in my chest. Did these almost memories have something to do with my trauma? Had we parted under less than amiable circumstances?

"I kept her safe for you. Like I promised," he said.

He kissed my temple and wrapped an arm around me, careful not to touch my dress with the green goo on his hands. I laughed and took his hands in mine, wiping them on my skirts, not caring. He chuckled and kissed me. With his expression merry and light, his eyes crinkled into half moon shapes and I could see the resemblance to the boy he once had been. The lines of his eyes reminded me of his mother's eyes.

I smoothed a hand over his cheek and kissed his lips. When I focused, I found they held the same love I once had known. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer.

"My husband," I said, trying the words on my tongue. They felt natural.

I ran my fingers over his muscled chest, kissed his scars and hugged him again. He slid my blouse down my shoulders and unbuttoned my skirts. I fell on top of him, nibbling my way down his chest. He had just unlaced my corset and thrown it on the floor when Mr. Foster came in the room.
Chapter Twenty-One

If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter.

―George Washington, former president of the United Worlds of Planets

Mr. Foster's jaw fell open and he staggered back at the sight of us. "Good god!" He looked from one of us to the other. "Miss Earnshaw, do you need assistance in getting this savage off you?"

At the moment, I was far more on Taishi Nipa than he was on me. That reply, of course, would not suffice. "I believe I was overcome with a fit of . . . um, fainting, when the Tanukijin emperor thought he could assist by removing my corset." I covered myself with my blouse and stood. "Ahem. I'm much better, I assure you."

Mr. Foster's eyes were still wide and his mouth gaped like a fish. He stared at the tattoos on my arm, his mustache twitching. "I just, um, pardon me. I came to tell you there's a problem with those beasts in the cargo bay."

One chiramantep paced back and forth, letting out an occasional cry. The other, the smaller one I'd ridden, writhed on the floor, kicking out at the wall and then falling into a motionless stupor.

"If you need me to put those animals out of their misery, I have a laser gun and I know how to use it," Mr. Foster offered.

Upon hearing his voice, the mewling chiramantep growled and reared up on his hind legs.

Nipa pointed at the door and spoke in Jomon. "Out." His word needed no translation.

Mr. Foster eyed me doubtfully. Even fully dressed and assuring him thrice that I was quite well, he didn't believe me. He grudgingly withdrew.

"If only I had more memory moss," Nipa said. "We use it as a painkiller on areas that ail them." He circled behind the blue fuzzball and stroked the animal's head. The chiramantep whined, a pathetic sound that broke my heart.

"What's wrong with him?" I asked. There was no injury that I saw.

Taishi Nipa nodded to the gnawed-on bulkheads. "As you might have observed, chiramantep eat anything and everything. They especially like memory moss, but memory moss doesn't like them. Sometimes they find a patch we don't know about and this happens." He gestured to the animal.

The ailing chiramantep kicked out at the wall again. Taishi stroked his head, avoiding the horns and incisors. The animal abruptly stopped and whimpered. The air became acrid with an odor I associated with chiramantep excretion and sure enough, a pink puddle pooled out from the back end. The whimpering intensified into a shrill, ethereal screech. Tears welled up in the chiramantep's eyes. A metallic thud echoed in the room, though neither of the chiramanteps had kicked out.

Taishi backed up and grabbed my arm. The animal rolled over and shook itself, splattering pink urine on the walls. Captain Ford would be ever so pleased with me.

The chiramantep pranced over to his friend and licked the female's cheek.

In the pink puddle on the floor lay a red stone.

"Is that what I think it is?" I asked.

Taishi stepped over, nudging it out of the puddle with his boot. "We call them chiramantep stones. The animals get them if they ingest memory moss. Children sometimes collect them for their pebble game." He picked it up and wiped it on his pants. "Your red diamonds." He held it out to me.

I shook my head and laughed. If there was a planet out there where animals excreted diamonds, then surely there had to be a world where trees were made of chocolate or the people made out of peppermint. I didn't know which was more dangerous, candied people or diamond excretions.

Taishi bowed his head. "As I told the men in your party, if they knew where the stones came from, I doubt they would have wanted it."

An hour later the snow stopped.

We were now faced with choices that might determine the fate of the remaining Jomon people. We could take the chiramantep with what we could strap to them, or we could fly the ship closer. If the ship was nearer to the settlement, their location would be known, just as Taishi Nipa feared. Even if I erased the ship logs, a task I was quite capable of doing, I had no doubt records still existed in the babbage cards in the ship's brains. It was hard to imagine what the consequences would be. Would all who remained of our original crew be forced to live with the Jomon, lest they give the location away? Or would it be better that the indigenous colonists' location was known? Who could I contact in the United Worlds who wasn't likely to be under Lord Klark's thumb?

I laid a hand on Taishi's arm to stop him from strapping the bags to the chiramantep . "I know you don't want to take chances, but I believe I must share your existence with the United Worlds. The government of the United Worlds must know who you are and your plight. We must tell many people so that one man, no matter how powerful, cannot be allowed to exterminate a species."

He shook his head. "This is a great risk. It is difficult to put my people's fate in the hands of gaijin nipas."

I stared into his black, somber eyes that had once been continuously smiling. "These are my people. I know their ways."

He smoothed a strand of blonde hair from my face. "I will listen to your words and do as you advise."

"Mr. Foster will fly the ship closer to save time. I will then notify the United Worlds."

He frowned, clearly uneasy, but he didn't object. The ship took longer to warm up and ready than it did to fly to our destination. The flight was so smooth and quiet, the chiramantep remained happy in the cargo bay munching on the captain's private reserves of raspberry tarts, lemon custard and filet mignon.

Taishi Nipa and I packed the remaining supplies into bags. Mr. Foster assisted lugging the bags into the cargo hold. I readied the chiramantep alongside Taishi Nipa.

I bowed to him. "I will stay and send the message. I can descend the cliffs on my own after I finish."

He looked as though he were about to refute this.

"Go. Your people need you. I will be along shortly."

He kissed me goodbye. "We will meet again soon."

It was a long walk from the cargo bay to the bridge. I was alone in an almost deserted vessel, but I felt as though a thousand eyes watched. I glanced up at the camera mounted on the ceiling. The red eye tracked me as I moved.

With growing unease, I seated myself on the bridge in the captain's chair. Unlike the private quarters with their ability to record, but not send messages without first going through the ship's comm station, the bridge could send messages directly to other worlds and space stations. There would be a time delay as the messages bounced from hyperspeed stations, but it would be five seconds at the most.

I scanned the electronic directory for the president of the United Worlds. His line was, naturally, busy. The comm-bot asked me to leave a message. I was assured the serial number of my sending post would be known and if I was a princess, ambassador, or general, my message would be forwarded to the front of the queue.

Had I not been seated where I had access to the entirety of the ship monitors before me, I might not have noticed Mr. Foster lock the ship doors.

I pressed the button for the ship intercom. "Mr. Foster, what are you doing? Nipa might need to come back for more supplies."

His voice was tinny and metallic over the ship speakers, leading me to wonder where he was. Probably the engine room. "Yes, and if that savage returns and we wish it, we can choose to unlock the doors. Or if the captain sees the ship and wishes to return to it, he knows the access code from the outside. Only friends will be able to get in."

"The Jomon are our friends. I say we leave the doors unlocked."

He snorted. "Not according to Captain Ford's message. He left me in charge of the ship and I will do my job to protect it."

"Captain Ford isn't in charge of this mission, now is he? Lord Meriwether Klark is." I added a white lie, hoping it would help. "And he appointed me to carry it out, therefore my seniority outweighs yours."

"I sincerely doubt that, miss."

I wasn't sure what vexed me more, that he implied I was a woman, therefore I could never outrank him, or that he thought Meriwether wouldn't leave an important deed in my care. Then again, if Meriwether was in on this entire plot with his father. . . .

Mr. Foster's voice came in clearer now. "What if a tribe of them come to kill us in our sleep? Or worse yet, destroy the ship. You do know how the Santa Maria was destroyed, don't you? Someone took out the faceted diamond in the laser and replaced it with another stone. The light refracted the wrong way and destroyed the ship."

I remembered Taishi Nipa's questions about the ship laser. I didn't think he would have destroyed the Santa Maria, but he had wanted to know the answers to his questions for a reason. Had someone intended to use the laser as a weapon, but they had destroyed the ship instead?

Mr. Foster's implication did little to ease the unsettled churning building in my core. I didn't know which scenario was worse, that he should be right and the Jomon—or a few of them—truly were our enemies, or that I might be locked in the ship alone with one of Lord Klark's men. Surely Mr. Price hadn't been Lord Klark's only infiltrator over the years.

I attempted using the manual controls of the bridge to override the lock. When that failed, I had no other choice but to allow Mr. Foster control.

"Very well," I said.

The doors to the right of the captain's chair swished open and Mr. Foster entered with two cups of tea on a tray. "Sugar?" Milk?" he asked. Suddenly he was now serving tea and performing "a woman's duties" voluntarily?

I bowed my head to him as though he were Jomon, but stopped myself midway through. "Thank you, I'll have mine later. I need to send a message. If you don't mind, I need a moment of privacy."

"Oh, for Lord Klark?" The smile plastered across his cheeks looked more like a sneer than any gesture of merriness.

I bowed my head. "As you can imagine, it is a delicate matter that ought not be overheard."

Mr. Foster's mustache twitched. He left the tray of tea and slipped out from the room.

I could only hope he wouldn't interfere with what I was about to do next. I scanned the directory, attempting to contact a number of different ambassadors and leaders, none of whom had the time to speak with someone sending a message from a lowly captain's comm unit.

At best, I could record a message and send it to many, hoping it would get through to at least one of them soon. On a lark, I looked up Mr. and Mrs. Reginald Jefferson, my mother's parents, and cc'd them.

"Hello, my name is Felicity Earnshaw, daughter of William Earnshaw and Lady Clementine Jefferson Earnshaw, also known as Felicity of the Stars to the indigenous people of the Jomon tribes here on the world we call Planet 157. I have a story to tell to those who will listen. I must start at the beginning so you will understand my dilemma. . . ."

I began with my mother's death and my father continuing in her footsteps, and moved on to my sister and me discovering and befriending inhabitants who were descendants of one of the original tribes who set out millennia ago. I explained the circumstances around the rare, red diamonds and how valuable they were deemed to be.

The part about Lord Klark was more difficult to describe, as I didn't know what crimes he had committed. Even sticking to the facts of what I had witnessed and the destruction of what I had seen in Taishi's memories—my memories now—I had to backtrack to explain how some of my memories had been wiped away and some returned. Several times I reversed the recording and started over to clarify details for someone unaccustomed to Jomon. I told of my first meeting with Lord Klark and my upbringing in his care, including the way he forbade me from going out in public lest people gossip about me.

I paused the recording when Mr. Foster entered. "I forgot the cookies," he whispered, setting them on the tray. "Don't mind me."

Not sure whether to be vexed or wary, I waited until he left. I didn't have access to the entirety of the ship's controls, but I did have the ability to lock the bridge door and I did so.

I continued my recording. "I don't know if a reason was contrived to excuse me from meeting my family or if they have chosen not to contact me. It is my hope that my sister and I will both have a safe place to go among family should we have need of it. I can guess that if my mother's elopement brought Lord and Lady Jefferson's disapproval, then my own marriage to a Jomon emperor might bring an even greater divide. It is my hope that you will not spite the people of this world for my choices and instead aid them when they are on the brink of extinction at our doing. If you cannot bring yourself to do so for me, it is my hope you will for these people." I ended the recording, leaning back in the captain's comfortable chair. What a relief it was to tell someone the entirety of my story. I considered whether I had said all that needed to be said. As it was, my message was twenty minutes long.

The sizzle of ozone registered, but I thought nothing of it. I lifted a finger to press send.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

I turned to see Mr. Foster aiming a laser pistol at my head.
Chapter Twenty-Two

Cautious, careful people, always casting about to preserve their reputations . . . can never effect a reform.

—Susan B. Anthony of the United Worlds of America

Mr. Foster's mustache twitched up and down as it was wont to do when he was agitated. "Put your hands up where I can see them, Miss Earnshaw."

I stayed frozen, my hand hovering over the send icon. "You are Lord Klark's informant?" I asked.

He chuckled. "Do you think he has only one?"

"How did you get in without my noticing?" The door had never swished open.

He nodded to the adjoining meeting room. The door to that chamber was open, as was a hatch in the ceiling. I glanced around the room to see if there was anything near that I might use as a weapon. Aside from the tray of tea, there was little.

"Put up your hands. I will shoot you if I have to." His mustache twitched again.

"I believe I'm more valuable to Lord Klark alive than dead. After all, his son isn't likely to inherit a fortune if I die."

"Alive is preferred, but not vital. Should you become maimed, I have no doubt Lord Klark will forgive me. You don't need both your hands anyway." He shifted his aim from my head to my hand. "Step back or I shoot."

I withdrew my hand and scooted to the far side of the captain's chair. Mr. Foster trained his gun on me as I crossed over to the tea tray. I stared at the steaming pot, thinking of Tomomi's lessons, but it was Nipa's that came to mind. I had to be clever with what I had.

My heart thundered in my ribs. I poured two cups of tea. In my corset I could scarcely breathe. I had to weigh my priorities. A planet was at stake. I would do the Jomon little good if Mr. Foster destroyed my message. Lord Klark would kill the natives and I would never forgive myself. If I was permitted to live.

I added a lump of sugar to my tea.

Mr. Foster's mustache twitched. "What are you doing?"

"Do you take sugar, Mr. Foster?"

He said nothing. His eyes shifted to the communication pad to the right of the captain's chair. As he stepped forward, I threw the teapot at his head. He dodged, but not in time to stop a splatter of hot liquid from splashing across his face. He screamed and lunged forward. I anticipated he'd move toward me and threw the remainder of the tray. I dove toward the send button.

He squeezed down on the trigger. I yanked my hand back. The first bolt of red light shot out of the gun. The sound crackled in the air. The pulse of beams hit the computer. I dropped to the ground to avoid the spray of fire and metal.

Another bolt of light hissed through the air, though this one was from behind us. The stench of fried flesh filled my nostrils. Mr. Foster's mustache twitched. He stared down at his singed uniform and the smoking cavity in his chest. His mouth formed a perfect "O" as he toppled over.

Hanging upside down from the trapdoor in the other room was Meriwether, of all people. He threw down his gun and made an ungraceful landing onto the conference room table.

I rushed over. "How did you get in?"

"I used my security code on the doors outside when I saw they were locked." He took me by the shoulders and looked me over. "Are you quite all right? What happened? Why would Mr. Foster attempt to shoot you?"

One of my sleeves was singed and a small cut bled on my knuckles, no doubt from the exploding computer. I let out a quaking breath.

My subsiding fear gave way to suspicion. "Why are you here?"

"I saw the ship and thought something must be wrong if you were landing it closer. I've learned how the Jomon value their secrecy. When I saw Nipa descending the cliff path without you, I began to fret even more. After getting in, I tried to enter the bridge but that was locked too. I grabbed a laser pistol from the captain's room in case I had need of it. Then I saw the chair below the open hatch in the ceiling outside and put together something wasn't right. I climbed in to investigate. When I heard the tail end of the conversation, I drew the laser pistol and took aim. But why would Mr. Foster do such a thing? Was he mad?"

I threw my arms around him and kissed his cheek. Surely Meriwether wasn't in on his father's plot if he'd killed his father's informant.

"Oh, um, capital," Meriwether said. His face flushed red and he cleared his throat. "Now you'll have to tell me what all this is all about. Why was one of my father's men about to kill you?"

I swallowed, uncertain how Meriwether would take the news. "I attempted to send a message with some . . . sensitive material within. I was notifying the United Worlds that this planet was inhabited and explained some of the past events."

Meriwether adjusted his cravat. "That is very well and all, but I can hardly see how that warrants an attack on your person."

"Your father knows the planet is inhabited. I saw it in my . . . well, I have some of my memories back. The information in my report will not paint your father in the most flattering light."

Meriwether's eyes widened. "Your memories! Capital! I know you've always hoped to retrieve them. Sumiko told me her brother would help you with that."

I laughed and shook my head. Perhaps Meriwether had been told more than I had.

I took Meriwether's hands in mine. "You must understand, what I have to say to the United Worlds will affect your father, his businesses and his fortune. I don't know how it could tarnish you or your reputation."

He shook his head in dismay. "I need you to tell me the entirety of what you refer to."

"It would be so much easier to show you the recording that just got blown to pieces." I threw up my hands in exasperation.

"Oh?" Meriwether crossed over to the other side of the bridge, walking all the way around Mr. Foster's prostrate form. He tapped at a few keys on the wall to bring up backup data. "These new-powered ships have virtual babbage cards to store data so that everything is saved in a cloud, so to speak. I'm sure it must be somewhere." He sorted through lists of numbers that made little sense to me. How he knew which one to select baffled me. But then I had not been given leave to study the science of automatons and machinery as he had.

Finally Meriwether found what he was looking for and played my recording. I tensed, uncertain how he would react. His cheery demeanor diminished when my recording told of the tragedies that had overtaken the Jomon world, tragedies his father had played a key role in creating.

When it was over, he closed his eyes. His breath was shallow and his pallor waxy and gray. "You must send it." He didn't look at me as he spoke.

"I don't want to—"

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "You must speak your truth."

I pressed send.

He swallowed several times before he managed. "Is it all true? What you said . . . you are already married?"

When I returned to the cliff palace, I found that Meriwether and Charbonneau had been caring for the ill child, the old woman who soon became ill, and Sumiko.

I couldn't help smiling when Meriwether took credit for bringing her back from the brink of death.

Meriwether set up an easily accessible medical station in the great hall. Little old ladies sitting and weaving winked at him. "Chinny, chin-chin man. You have returned to tell us more stories?" they asked in Jomon.

I translated the polite part of their sentence.

He bowed his head, imitating their gestures and asked me to decline on his behalf. He showed Charbonneau and me how to administer vaccines using a needle spray. The specialty syringe detected the age and size of the patient, in order to administer the appropriate amount. Nipa sounded a gong outside, calling in his people.

"We've got a long line of patients to get through," Meriwether said. "We need to be organized and thorough if we're going to prevent illness from spreading."

I laced an arm through his and patted his hand. "You truly are my hero."

"If only that were true." His smile was sad and full of longing.

"Would you two stop necking and get a move on," Captain Ford said, tromping over. "I insist on being your first patient." This was the second time I'd seen him sober. What he lacked in inebriation he made up for with his black mood.

"You've already been vaccinated. We were all vaccinated before we set out," Charbonneau said coolly. "Now stand aside." He tugged at the cuffs of his sleeves.

I watched the exchange warily. When I had asked Mr. Foster if he had been Lord Klark's spy, he had implied Lord Klark wouldn't dare have merely one. He also had mentioned the captain secretly calling him.

"Yeah, well, disease works both ways. If they can get our illnesses, we get theirs. And I would swear I've got some kind of pesky parasite from the way my bowels are stirring about."

"Good lord, save the details for a time a lady isn't present," Meriwether said. "Come here and I'll test you."

I clenched a syringe in my hand, ready to stab Captain Ford with it should he try to turn the table over and destroy our means of providing health to the natives. Meriwether pricked his finger and ran it through the micro-analysis machine.

"It isn't such a bad idea to see if our bodies are tolerating their environment," Meriwether said.

"I did carry a disease here once—though I was quite unaware of it at the time," I admitted. "Mr. Charbonneau, you shall be next." I said. "Then I'll test myself."

He held up his palms. "Me? No, I'm fine. Look, the first children are here for their vaccines." He pointed to the children crowding in the door, too shy to come in.

Captain Ford's voice boomed over Charbonneau's polite protests. "How can my test come back negative? I swear an Orion bowel worm has taken residence in my gut!"

Meriwether whispered. "Consider a slight deviation to your diet and adding fiber to your next meal."

I held out my hand for Charbonneau. "It will take but a second."

"You may test me after the others. The children come first," he said firmly.

By now, most of the people had crowded into the hall, curious and wide-eyed. Nipa made a great show of being the first to be vaccinated to prove how safe the process was. People shifted uneasily. I didn't think the distrust had been this great when I was a teenager. Then again, perhaps it had, and I had been blind to it.

An old woman ushered an adolescent girl holding hands with a little boy to our makeshift counter.

"Step right up," the captain said. "See if they'll give you a cure for worms up your arse. They wouldn't for me." He plopped down between Meriwether and me. I'd always assumed his obnoxious personality was due to strong drink. Now I wondered if it was simply innate to his character.

Meriwether sighed in exasperation. I handed him an electronic clipboard. "Make yourself useful and take names."

He swiped his fingers across the screen, muttered curses under his breath, and then shoved it at Charbonneau. "You figure out how to use this thing. I'll use the machine."

"You haven't been trained," Charbonneau said.

He climbed over the table and scooted Charbonneau aside. "Aye, I have. I'm a ship's captain. I'm trained in everything. Except data entry."

I nudged Meriwether with an elbow and nodded to the captain. Mr. Foster hadn't been Lord Klark's only spy. Surely the captain was in cahoots with Lord Klark. Meriwether waved a dismissive hand in his direction. "Oh, he won't hurt anything as long as he doesn't break the equipment."

I hated how trusting he was. He didn't look up when I tried to catch his eye. He busied himself, completely oblivious to any danger that might occur.

Charbonneau took down names, muttering the entire time that we shouldn't let drunks play doctor.

It took the better part of the day to test and vaccinate. Only two other people had the beginning symptoms of typhoid. Five had various forms of staphylococcus aureus. A little girl had a rash she kept itching. Four carried polio.

"No worries. Many people are carriers without ever developing symptoms," Meriwether said. "They might have even had this before we came here. We have more than enough antibiotics to go around." Meriwether hummed to himself. I'd heard him humming the same song days ago. Only now did I recognize it as a lullaby my mother used to sing.

A little boy sat down in front of me and held out his arm. I smiled reassuringly and set to work.

The tests and inoculation were tedious and time consuming. I was relieved when the only other people in the room were a few old men soaking fish jerky in pots of water and old women cutting vegetables.

"Is that it? We got them all?" Meriwether asked.

Nipa stared out the window at the darkening sky. Even with his tanuki mask on, I could tell his brow was furrowed from the way his eyebrows bunched close over his eyes. "Most."

"Who's left?" I asked.

"My daughter and my geari wife. Tomorrow," he said with finality. He nodded to me and left the room.

"And myself and Charbonneau," I said.

"Hello, chinny, chin-chin man," an old, toothless woman said to Meriwether. Ah, Grandmother Ami.

Meriwether waved. "We're done now. I can tell you another tale of my people if you want."

I waited for Charbonneau.

He crossed his arms and stuck up his nose. "No. I'm anemic. I'll bleed to death."

A bead of sweat trickled down his neck into his collar. With the windows open to let the smoke from the cooking fires out, the hall was a few degrees below balmy. Either he was feverish like Sumiko had been or he was nervous.

I held out my hand. "You will let me test you. Now."

"C'mon, old chap. Be a man, eh?" Captain Ford slapped him on the back. "You can do it yourself if you like." He pushed the machine toward Charbonneau.

We all waited for him. He swallowed and pricked his finger. He looked into my eyes and I read the guilt there. He was a carrier and he knew it. I suspected what the data would say before the verdict came out.

Captain Ford squinted over the other man's shoulder. "It looks like you're positive for typhoid, polio, staff-locoo cus au—"

"Staphylococcus aureus," Meriwether said. His face paled. "How can this be?"

Charbonneau straightened his cravat. Enough of his sleeve fell back to reveal the rash I'd seen him scratching at earlier.

Charbonneau ignored Meriwether. He locked eyes with the captain. "Lord Klark expects us to fulfill our duty to him. Failing is not an option. Are you with him or against him, captain?"

"What? You can't possibly mean my father would use you as biological warfare!" Meriwether protested.

I glanced about for some manner of weapon. There were no sticks or spears. I eased my fingers around the heavy machine used for making vaccines, uncertain I would even be able to lift it from my seated position.

Captain Ford spat. "You dirty son-of-skilamalink. I was hired to captain a starship and not to ask too many questions. All the diamonds in the galaxy wouldn't convince me—"

Charbonneau overturned the little table so fast it pushed Meriwether and me over backward. The vaccination machine landed on my chest and rolled off. It knocked the breath out of me and I lay stunned. Captain Ford dove for Charbonneau, but he ended up tackling a pot of jerky soaking in water instead. Charbonneau pushed the elderly aside and leapt over tables, stumbling and righting himself. He ran like a youth a fraction of his age. He had almost reached the door when Grandma Ami shuffled over to the upturned pot. She grabbed it by the handle and hurled it at Charbonneau. It arced through the air and came down in his head. The ring of it cracking against his skull sounded like a bell. He fell to his knees and he the swayed before hitting the ground.

"Now chinny, chin-chin story?" Grandma Ami asked.

After our party escorted Charbonneau to the brig of the ship, I was exhausted.

I was impatient to see Taishi—Taishi Nipa. I paced my room and when he didn't come, I went to his room. He was in the process of laying out our vaccines on the table. As usual, he wore his mask.

"Are you going to make me wait all night for you?" I asked.

He opened his arms and I went to him. One of the tusks tangled into my hair but I ignored it.

"Tonight you will give me back the rest of my memories?" I asked.

He slipped a hand inside my robe, smoothing his fingers over my hip. "That's why you come to me so excited and insistent? You want memories, not my chin-chin?"

I smacked his shoulder.

He laughed and pulled off his headdress. "Do you wish me to give you your memories back now? I already gave you painful ones today. It will be even more difficult for you to experience those I hold because the reason you asked me to remove these memories in the first place was so you wouldn't have to think about them. I never had intended to keep them this long. We will go slowly, to only start you with a few so it won't drive you mad with sorrow as it once did."

I ran my fingers through his shorn hair. The prickle against my fingers was like touching memory moss. "I do want my memories back. I need them back."

He squeezed me closer. "You will be so sad, ne? I hate that I must be the one to do this. I hate that just when I have you back again, you will be taken away from me by this burden."

I nodded. "Perhaps then we could have one night as husband and wife before that?"

He winked at me. "You are my very clever wife."

I kissed his nose. "And you are my very handsome husband."

He lifted me and carried me to his bed. He undressed me slowly, teasingly, drawing out each movement as though he were performing otemae, the art of serving tea. With every button unfastened, he planted a kiss on the corset and chemise beneath. The warmth of his breath penetrated through the layers of garments. I breathed more deeply when he unlaced my corset. He unfastened each hook and eye, his fingers brushing against my belly and breasts. I tugged at the ribbon on the collar holding my chemise closed to loosen it.

Taishi teased his face across my cleavage. He cupped my breasts and rubbed a thumb over my nipples to make them stand erect. When I could stand it no more, I snared my fingers through his belt and pulled him closer to untie his attush.

Grinning, he lifted the hem of my chemise and tugged it over my head. I felt no shame at our nakedness. If anything, I basked in the way admiration shone in his eyes.

The warm glow of the fire danced over his features. There were moments I saw the boy in his eyes and in the plump shape of his lips. Other moments I saw the man I had come to know. I loved both. It was a blessing not to have to choose between the two.

I reclined back. He dipped his head to kiss me. My heart sped up the way it had when I'd kissed him for the first time. Only these kisses weren't stolen. He gave them eagerly now.

I wrapped my legs around him. He kissed his way down my neck, over my collar bone and across my breasts. His hand slid down my hip and up my inner thigh. Each time he dared a little higher, brushing the hair between my legs with his fingers and stroking closer to my maidenhood.

I savored every kiss, hungry for each one I had missed over the years. With the way time had passed, it was a wonder he'd been able to wait this long. He grazed his teeth against my ribs and made me shiver with a half-tickle, half-sensual touch that he apparently knew I enjoyed better than I did.

I was as relaxed and comfortable as any lover having used memory moss when he brought his mouth down on my breast. I arched into him, the sheer pleasure of it nearly sending me over the edge. When he leaned in to kiss my face, I bit his lip. He pulled away, laughing like a young man again.

From the way he kissed me full and deep, one would never have guessed this gesture to be a Jomon taboo. His fingers parted the folds of skin between my legs, the warmth wet and willing. I tilted my hips into his hand. I had no memory of him doing this before, but I was certain from the way he knew my body we must have. He slipped a finger inside me and I shuddered with pleasure.

His smile was mischievous. "Who's the better kisser? Me or Meriwether?"

"You!" I groaned and pulled him toward me.

"I thought you would say that." He laughed and kissed me again. He leaned into me, his erection hard against me. "And who is the better lover?"

"You know I haven't been with him." I yanked him closer by the front of his open robe and took hold of his erection.

He moaned and sank closer. It was now his turn to shudder as I stroked him.

"Tell me anyway. Tell me who's the better lover." He panted into my ear.

"Probably Tomomi."

He lifted his head and bit my neck. I shrieked with laughter. He was laughing too. He rolled over onto his back and pulled me on top. I knew what I was meant to do. I hesitated, staring at his engorged penis. He and I had petted each other and touched in the jungle many times, mostly through our clothes, but I didn't ever remember him looking this big.

I eased myself onto his erection, slowly letting my body adjust to his width and length. I clenched around him and shuddered. There was such tenderness in his eyes as he gazed up at me, that I knew without doubt he loved me.

I had the sense that at last I was home.

I woke the next morning in my husband's room, his arms snug around me. He nuzzled his face into my hair.

"Good morning," he mumbled against my neck. "I shall bathe and then get us some breakfast."

I wrapped the attush around myself again to relieve myself in the privy and brushed out the snarls in my hair in my room. If there was a morning I needed a washing it was this one, so I gave myself a quick cleanse in the women's onsen.

Of course, nothing was really quick with old women squabbling and demanding to know how many times my husband and I had each other the night before.

"I think about ten," I said.

"No, really," one of them said.

"Maybe twenty. I lost count." I went back to scrubbing, trying not to laugh at their awe-struck reactions. Of course, I was kidding, but they didn't have to know that.

Taishi Nipa was gone from his room when I returned. I served the tea, practicing the slow, elegant movements that looked like a dance of hands that he had performed in days past.

He came back with a tray and set it down in front of us. "We were in luck. There were two ume ripe on the tree in my secret garden." He kissed my cheek and commenced to cut apart the fruit.

I noticed a movement behind one of the woven tapestries on the wall. I glanced at the fur that had been lifted from the window to air out the room. I felt no breeze. When I noticed the tapestry waft in an invisible wind, I said under my breath, "Someone is in here watching us."

Taishi glanced over his shoulder. "It's only the wind." He served me a portion of pickled root.

Still feeling uneasy, I glanced at the hides of animal skins and tapestries woven with designs that resembled the patterns on my arms. When Taishi made a joke and I heard a giggle, I leapt to my feet and threw back the skins. My breath caught in my throat. A little blonde girl, looking to be twelve years of age stared up at me.

Taishi scolded, "Michi, I told you to stay with your auntie. I said I would bring the visitor to you when I thought she was ready."

"I'm sorry, Papa." She hung her head in shame. However much shame she felt, it wasn't enough to keep her from speaking her mind. "It's just that you've made me wait so long. I've been hearing about her my entire life."

I dropped to my knees, staring at the girl's creamy complexion. Freckles dotted her upturned nose and her pouting lips were my sister's. Faith had always been the more beautiful of the two of us, and this little girl was even more beautiful than she. I smoothed a hand over her silky hair. My heart seized in my chest. This wasn't possible.

Then I realized how a twelve-year-old might be possible. His daughter. His wife—his geari wife.

I stood, breathing steadily to keep from crying. I glared at him for keeping this secret from me. Once again I had been deceived.

Taishi eyed me warily. "Michi, go to your room," he said.

I held my anger in check long enough not to say something I would regret in front of this child.

He toed the stone floor, not meeting my eyes. "Do you understand now? Do you know whose child this is?"

My heart clenched as I said the words. "You married my sister after I left."
Chapter Twenty-Three

The people who only love once in their lives are really the shallow people. What they call their loyalty, and their fidelity, I call either the lethargy of custom or their lack of imagination.

—Oscar Wilde, author of Lady Windemere's Spaceship

Betrayal cut through me like a chiramantep bear's claws. "Faith is your other wife?"

He flinched. "She is my geari wife. Do you have almost memories about the last time you saw her?"

I shook my head, unable to think about memories for the moment. "All that talk about love and kissing and your exploits of being with a gaiyojin woman. You weren't just speaking of me, but my sister?" I couldn't keep the disgust from my voice. "Can you possibly understand what a taboo this is in my culture? You've lain with two sisters? She isn't a day's walk away either, is she? She's here and you're hiding her from me. Does she even know I'm here?"

He frowned. "The star men have poisoned you with so much suspicion and heartache you cannot see the truth. I love you." He reached out to hold me but I stepped back.

"You will take me to see my sister this instant."

He reached for the box of memory moss. "Let me share with you what happened first."

"No, I don't want any more of your sharing until I've spoken to Faith. Take me to see her."

It was a long walk down the pathways where he led me. Though he wore his mask and kept his mouth expressionless, misery hung on his frame like a heavy cloak, weighing him down. People called out to us and he nodded, but said nothing.

When he pulled back the hide to a room of women and children, the room silenced. "Everyone out. Felicity-chan wishes to see her sister," he said.

Michi lingered in the corner, weaving a basket as the others filed out.

"You too, daughter," Taishi said.

Only when the room was empty did I see her. She wore a poor imitation of off-world finery. Tanuki hides had been sewn to resemble puff sleeves and a fitted waist. Her skirt was long and covered her ankles. Her long blonde hair obscured half her face. She was still beautiful, more beautiful than I had ever been, though she was now older than I. She bit her lip, more pensive than pleased to see me.

I threw my arms around her and kissed her. Whatever had happened, I knew I could forgive her. I was so relieved to see her at last. For the first time since returning to Aynu-Mosir, I allowed myself to cry freely. "All these years I thought you were dead. I wanted to see you as soon as I found out you were alive but—" As I pulled away, I noticed what her loose hair obscured. The right side of her face sagged and was pink with lumpy scars. Her eyelid drooped so low I wasn't sure she could even see out of it. The shock must have shown on my face.

She turned away. "I am a disappointment," she said.

"No, no, not at all. You're my sister. We can be together again." I kissed her smooth cheek and then her scarred one. "What happened? Is this why you didn't come to see me when I first arrived?" I touched her cheek. "Why did you stay here instead of returning home?"

She looked over my shoulder. "Haven't you shared with her?"

Taishi shook his head. "She wouldn't let me. She saw Michi and . . . I think you must explain to your sister what happened after the attack."

"Who is to blame? Did Lord Klark do this?" I asked.

"No." She looked down. "You did."
Chapter Twenty-Four

Trust takes years to build, seconds to break, and forever to repair.

—Ancient Jomon proverb

My sister, once the younger, more beautiful one, kneeled beside me aged and scarred. She took my hands in hers. "There is so much to tell, I don't know where to begin. With the first attack, or the second that resulted in this." She waved at her disfigured face. "Or with Taishi. . . ."

With just the two of us alone in her remote chamber, I felt as though time was meaningless. I pulled the long chain of the pocket watch from my skirt pockets and placed it in my sister's hands.

I closed my palms around hers. "Tell me what happened to you, to us—about Michi. Tell me everything."

She took a long moment to collect herself. "The meeting of the elders was supposed to be a celebration day. You, Taishi and I didn't get to celebrate with the other children because we were translators for the adults. Poppy's team had been learning the language, but they were little help. To make matters worse, Mr. Price disappeared and Miss Osborn was beside herself with worry.

"Do you remember how Poppy hoped to help the Jomon come to an agreement about whether they would permit trade amongst our two peoples? He thought that coming up with these rules and helping them set limits to the ways their lands could be used would be to their advantage."

This noble man didn't sound like the father I remembered, but I held my tongue for once. This was not my story to tell.

"The meeting had only just begun when I smelled that funny odor of ozone from lasers. At first I didn't understand what the hiss and crackle noise was, but then the roof of the tree house exploded in fire. I knew I had to get away. Poppy stood and shouted. I couldn't even hear him over the screams. One moment he was there, the next he was this sizzling mass of cinders.

"Everything was on fire and we were being shot at. I was frozen with fear and I probably would have died if you hadn't thrown me through the hole in the wall to outside. We fell onto the ground below and I hurt my shoulder, but you picked me up and made me run. I think you hurt something in your foot, at least that's what you told me later, but you didn't feel it then. Taishi came running after us, directing us to the stream that flowed away from the village. There was so much smoke I was blind and choking. It smelled like burning human hair, and at one point I stepped on someone's charred skull. It caved in and squished."

I cringed at the image. I recalled the beauty of the elegant houses hidden in the boughs of trees. The branches and greenery they were made from blended them in so well with the jungle that I still hadn't seen them the first time Taishi had pointed to them out to me. Only now in my mind, I saw it all aflame and being destroyed.

Faith inhaled and placed a deformed hand over her heart as if that could keep it from breaking. "We kept running and running and we only stopped when Taishi took us to a cave. We spent the night there shivering, despite the heat. We all had burns that we cooled in the river, but that could only do so much. We were alone and didn't know what to do. Those who had survived had fled in all directions. Taishi led us to the Isepojin, a tribe that lived underground like the savanna's rabbit-hogs we used to see in the valley. They gave us food and salves for our burns but they wouldn't let us stay. They said you and I were bad luck and we'd brought death to their world. Taishi, they said, could remain with them.

"He wouldn't leave us, so we hid in the jungle. We stayed away from the men in their spaceships—ships that dwarfed the Santa Maria. We spied on Lord Klark's men as they tried to get into the Santa Maria. They ended up cutting out the side to get in because they didn't have the code. They stole the basket of red stones Shoko Nipa had given Poppy. We didn't see that ourselves—Taishi told us. But there were quite a few times we lay hidden in hollowed logs or behind rocky ledges watching our enemies, holding our breaths that they would pass and wouldn't find us. So many times you wanted to rush out and fight but we had nothing of consequence to fight with—only spears and rocks and Jomon tools. Everything about them is so primitive compared to millennia ago when they came to this world.

"We traveled from tribe to tribe—or what was left of the Jomon tribes. Some of them offered us kindness for a time. One of the wise women gave you the tattoos. Another tribe married you and Taishi. But we weren't welcome anywhere for long. We were foreigners without souls and bad luck."

Faith's blonde hair fell over her face, hiding her blemished skin. For a moment I saw her as young and my little sister again. "You were so angry and so inconsolable, you sometimes scared me. But not Taishi. He always managed to calm you. He was the one who gave us hope that there would be better tomorrows . . . even when there weren't.

"The ship remained, vines growing over it in some places. It loomed like a tombstone over so much death. You had the idea to return to it, to see if there was anything of value that hadn't been pillaged by the other foreigners. Much of the equipment was still there and we snuck out all manner of things. It was the laser that interested you the most. You knew the red diamonds could be used for lasers. Some of the ship computers still worked well enough for you to read up on light refraction. You thought you'd found the answer.

"Many of the chiramantep had fled the valley, so it took a while before Taishi was able to find a chiramantep stone, but when he did, he brought it to you."

I leaned forward with interest. There had been something about Nipa's questions that led me to believe he had meant something more than he let on. I had almost experienced a memory. Every word she uttered rang with truth.

"You examined the red diamond under one of those monocles—or bionicals—as Poppy called them. You showed us how it wasn't really smooth. It was faceted with a million tiny surfaces. And when you shone a dull light at the stone, it even focused into a red beam. You were convinced this would create a weapon we could use against the big ships. We had no way of testing it without drawing attention to ourselves, so we waited until one was directly overhead. You directed an intense beam of light into the diamond. Only it didn't behave like an Earth-mined diamond or an Orion crystal or anything man-made. It created a hundred intense beams, most of which were directed upward. The ship in the sky did come crashing down, but we blew apart the Santa Maria while we were trapped inside."

Her breath came out in a shudder. Mine mirrored her own. Faith shook her head. "I don't blame you for getting him out first. I was buried under smoldering metal debris and you didn't even know where I was, let alone if I was alive. Taishi was there and he was breathing. He was the father of your unborn child. I would have done the same."

My heart broke for her and I hugged her to my side.

Her voice was high and frail, on the verge of tears as she had so often been as a child. "He was burned and there was a cut on his face—you can still see the scar today—the one on his cheek. He was only half conscious. You dragged him out and had to wait for the heat to die down before you came back in for me. I don't know if it was the laser or the hot metal that melted my face off. Later I tried to tell you I didn't blame you, but you always knew I did.

"You hated yourself and blamed yourself for everything. I think you went mad with grief, and even Taishi couldn't console you. He was afraid for you and afraid for your baby."

I thought about the girl I had met, the child whom I had assumed to be Faith's. Could it be she truly was mine? But she looked too young. Then again, Faith and I had always looked younger than other children.

I wanted Michi to be mine. Yet if she was, I had unjustly accused Taishi of marrying and bedding my sister. I hated myself for my rash words.

Faith squeezed my hand, misreading my expression. "You have to understand that he wanted to do something for you so badly that he would have done anything. So when he asked if you would let him take away one of your painful memories, we saw it was the first relief you'd had in months. Then you asked him again and again. It weighed his heart down to take on your sorrows as well as his, but he did it because he loved you.

"When you were birthing Michi, I didn't know anything about delivering a baby. I wasn't a midwife and I had no help except Taishi, who had birthed chiramanteps and watched animals birthing. I hated every minute of being on this wretched planet where there are no doctors, there's no indoor plumbing and no electricity. Women actually die in childbirth on this world and I feared you would as well. Then where would I be? Alone on this horrible planet. I wasn't like you, enjoying the customs and alien etiquette.

"But I digress. Your labor was long and painful and you kept saying you wanted to die. The baby didn't want to come out. Taishi told me I would have to cut you to make the opening bigger. I was so afraid. My hands were shaking and I didn't know what I was doing. I was so afraid for you—and for me that I would do everything wrong and you would leave me."

My almost memories toward my sister made more sense now. I'd felt pity toward her because of her face. The anger that she had somehow hurt me, my feelings that I deserved it, and what the doctor had related to the maids about the knife were all because of childbirth, not because I'd been violated. I shook my head to clear it and focused on her words, on her pain and not my own.

"After the baby you weren't yourself. You grew ill with infection. Taishi distracted you from your pain with memory moss. He eased your burden. With every memory you gave him, your anguish was lighter and his heavier. I don't know if you meant to give him all your memories or he took them on purpose. He only told me later than he intended to return them slowly so that you wouldn't have to experience them all at once again."

I remembered how only days ago I had inadvertently given Taishi Nipa four memories instead of one. It was possible I had done the same before, only on a larger scale.

Faith sucked in a quivering breath. "As it was, it was too much for Taishi. It drove him mad. I didn't trust you with the baby so I held her. I dragged him out and kicked him into the stream to sober him up. Then he almost drowned because he was practically catatonic and I had to set the baby down to pull him out again. When the men from the starship came, it was everything I could do to keep him quiet. I prayed they wouldn't find us. That they wouldn't find you.

"So much for prayers.

"When Taishi was himself again, he asked for you." She wept against my shoulder. "What kind of sister was I to let them take you? I told myself over and over I should have slit that boy's throat before he screamed for his father."

I shook my head and shushed her. "No, Meriwether wasn't to blame. Nor were you. You kept my daughter alive. And my husband as well." I squeezed her hand in mine. When she said no more, I suspected she was done, yet I still had more questions. "I must ask one more thing of you. I want to know about this business with you being his geari wife."

She half choked, half laughed at that, but sobered seeing my serious countenance. "You misunderstand the meaning of such a relationship. He was never my husband in that sense. Even so, there was only once I tempted him, and I admit it was completely my fault. I was so sad and lonely after you left. As if it wasn't bad enough that I was a gaijin, I also was deformed and ugly. Children were scared of me, and warriors dared each other talk to me or sit next to me because they thought I was so grotesque it would prove their bravery. Some of the women, the survivors who knew me, were kind. Taishi's sister, for one. He was so happy when he found her among the Isepojin.

"Perhaps my face would not have kept people away if I had learned to adapt and adopt their ways like you had. But I never was like you. I didn't enjoy speaking the language or eating their foods. I didn't find their customs charming and had no interest in learning about them at expense of losing myself. Taishi said I made myself an alien, but I didn't care. I didn't want to become Jomon.

"Eventually Taishi came to be leader and was respected among his people. He convinced them I was to be kept in the tribe and that I brought a unique skill to his people—my art. Though I think for many, my being sister of his wife and raising his daughter was enough to make me his geari wife. It kept away the advances of women who assumed his love for his first wife had been replaced by a second—though I can assure you that was never the case.

"When Taishi became leader, he was busy and I was even lonelier. Even so, each night he sat with me before the fire and put his arm around me. Sometimes we sat speaking of you, sometimes other matters. When we didn't want anyone else to know our words, we spoke in English. As a result, he remained quite fluent. One night when we were all alone I kissed his cheek." She blushed and looked down. "I knew he loved only you and wanted no other, but I would have given anything for him to love me. And you had left us both. We didn't even know if you lived. I mean, I didn't. He never lost hope.

"He looked at me uncertainly. When I kissed him again and started to remove my blouse, he stopped me. He said, 'Little sister, you are lonely, but you don't want me. And you know me well enough to know there is only one woman I want.' I cried and he bundled me up in a blanket and rocked me like a child. I thought for sure he would never speak to me again and I had lost my closest friend, but he came to me the next night and he sat by the fire as if nothing was amiss between us. He badgered the other men into talking to me, playing matchmaker and seeing if there was anyone who pleased me.

"There were a few who could tolerate my face and would forgive me for being alien and for my strange ways, but none of them loved me. In truth, I didn't let anyone get close enough to do so. I wanted the impossible. I wanted what you and Taishi had. I wanted a man who would take away my sorrows if he could."

Now I knew her sorrows as well as Taishi's. But I hadn't yet experienced my own.

I spent the day with my sister, taking lunch with her and doting on her in the same manner I had when we were younger. Faith raised an eyebrow when Michi came in carrying a tray of tea. "You're pushing your luck, little mei." Faith used English for all her words but her endearment of "niece."

All the breath went out of me upon seeing her angelic face. I felt as though I were in a dream. For once it was a happy one.

Michi responded in Jomon. "Poppy says I'm very good at that." She bowed to me. "Will you allow me to stay, Mother? I will sit and listen and promise to be quiet."

Faith snorted. "Your father often says you aren't very good at that either."

Michi's grin widened. "He says I'm like my mother."

She made me laugh in the same way he did. I bowed my head. I spoke in Jomon because that was what my daughter used. "I would be honored for you to have tea with us."

She bowed back, polite and formal. I threw my arms around her and embraced my daughter.

It was settled we'd have a private dinner with Taishi Nipa, our daughter, my sister, Sumiko and Meriwether. I grudgingly asked Captain Ford to join us, but he insisted on guarding Charbonneau in the brig of his ship. In truth, I think he simply wanted his reserve of ship food again.

I escorted Meriwether down the stairs and into the lower levels of the cliff palace. We passed uncovered windows. The evening sky was a dark azure. Snow levels had dropped and water dripped from icicles.

With the two of us at last alone, it was time to speak to him of one of the matters on my mind. "I must warn you about my sister. . . .I have told you of her beauty, but she has been much changed. I don't want you to say anything accidentally that will hurt her feelings."

He looked at me, puzzled. "Have I ever made a comment to a lady that would make her cry?"

I smoothed a hand over my tanuki hide tunic. "Let's see, there was the time Lady Ambrose was wearing that funny hat and you asked—"

"I was seventeen!"

"Then there was the time Duke Wellington introduced his daughter to you at a ball and you later told her you wouldn't dance with a girl who kept stepping on your toes."

His cheeks turned scarlet. "I don't recall." He busied himself with straightening his cravat.

"Oh, did someone steal your memories? What about the time you asked about my tattoos at that dinner party?"

He glanced at the tattoos fully exposed on my arms and then away. "I think that made my sister cry, not you."

I laughed and nudged him with an elbow.

He offered me an arm. He made an effort to keep his eyes forward and not stare at my legs exposed under the skirt or the way the collar of my tunic shifted as I moved, sometimes exposing hints of cleavage he was unused to seeing.

He said, "I beg you will forget my indiscretions and trust I have grown to be more diplomatic with time."

Upon reaching the room, we found all were seated at the table, save for my sister who played the stringed tonkori in the corner with her intact hand. She sat with her scars facing the wall. She nodded to us when we came in. I waited for her to break away from her music but she continued.

It took a moment for me to realize what was amiss. She wore my dress with my corset underneath! How she had contrived them, I could only guess. Of all the vexing things sisters could do. . . . No, it was not vexing. I had never felt at home in those clothes. She was always the one who wanted to dress like a lady.

Meriwether closed his eyes and swayed to the tranquil music of the harp. "What a lovely sound. I simply must bring one of those back home with me."

Taishi barked out in Jomon, "Is he referring to the instrument or the girl?"

I rolled my eyes. Faith's cheeks flushed red.

Michi bounded up to my sister, tugging on her sleeve and making her twang out the notes in a less than harmonious manner. "Auntie, my mother wishes to introduce us to someone."

Reluctantly Faith turned from the wall, keeping her face angled away so her scars wouldn't show. She stood before us, eyes downcast.

"This is my sister Faith," I said.

Faith bowed, then midway she stopped and curtsied.

Meriwether managed to close his gaping mouth. "Indeed!" He dropped to one knee and took her hand. "It's you, the ghost from my dreams. I knew you were real." He pressed her hand to his cheek.

Faith slipped her hand out of his and turned her eyes back to the floor.

I tugged Meriwether to his feet. "What are you going on about?"

He looked from me to Faith, his face flushing even redder than when I'd mentioned his tendency to say the wrong thing. "Pardon me. As you might already be aware, I'm Lord Meriwether Klark. I'm pleased to be formally introduced to you."

Faith bowed her head.

"Hmm," I said. He hadn't answered to my satisfaction, and I suspected he didn't intend to.

Taishi Nipa locked eyes with me, a question in his eyes. Whatever secret the two of them shared, he didn't know either.

I gestured to Michi. "And I would like to introduce Michi, my daughter."

I waited for the hurt in his eyes. I had forewarned him, but he could be so sensitive.

"A pleasure to meet you, Miss Michi." He bowed and kissed her hand. My daughter made a face and wiped it off on her skirt. We all laughed.

Meriwether sat between Sumiko and Faith. My sister seated herself with her good side toward him. He stared more than ate. Taishi nudged me a couple times when Meriwether did something he found worthy of poking fun at. Once it was missing his mouth and pouring sake down his chin instead.

Meriwether dabbed at his cravat with a napkin and laughed at himself. "Oh, I'm so clumsy sometimes."

This even made Faith laugh and she forgot to hide her face from him and looked at him fully. While he gaped at her even more, he spilled his wine in his lap and she tilted back her head and laughed. More of her throat was exposed for the briefest of seconds and I saw the raw, pink patchwork of scars that sank below her collar.

Faith dabbed at his cravat with her own napkin.

"I bet he wishes she'd pat down the other places he spilled sake, ne?" Taishi Nipa whispered in my ear.

Faith frowned and gave him a sharp glare, no doubt hearing what he'd said.

Meriwether's fingers lingered on hers as he took the napkin. There was a second when I thought I detected a hint of chemistry between them. Then he had to open his mouth and ruin everything. "We have very good doctors on our space station. They could reconstruct your hand. And it wouldn't take much to fix your face."

I coughed. When he looked at me I shook my head.

Faith returned to her corner to play music. After dinner, Sumiko joined her.

"Your sister is an accomplished lady," Meriwether said. "Why, you told me she knows drawing, but you never told me she had musical talent as well."

"Yes, and auntie sews and weaves." Michi spoke slowly, enunciating each English word. "But she will not dance. She says she will only dance to waltzes. Also she sings most beautifully."

Meriwether rested his head in his hands, a dopy grin on his face. "Perhaps she will sing for us tonight too."

Michi shook her head. "Auntie will not sing. Father says the only time she ever sang was lullabies when I was a baby."

"Indeed?" Meriwether asked. He lowered his voice. "I will have you know I've heard her sing. Though there is a chance I was dreaming." He called out to Faith. "Miss Earnshaw, will you sing for us tonight?"

Faith shook her head and whispered to Sumiko. My sister tilted her head so that her hair shielded her face from view. My throat tightened every time I saw the way she hid herself. Taishi squeezed my hand. Did he know the guilt that already had begun to eat away at my heart? Surely he did with my memories inside him.

"I will sing," said Sumiko.

Faith played the harp. Meriwether closed his eyes and listened.

Taishi leaned close to my ear. "Someone has fallen in love with your sister."

I shook my head. "No, he looks like that all the time." Most of the time, anyway. I'd seen another side of him caring for patients and responding to the situation with the seriousness it deserved. Even so, it was a challenge not to think of Meriwether's natural state as something other than daydreaming or acting silly. The idea he might experience love at first sight with a different lady raised by savages shouldn't have been such a surprise. Only she was so much older than he. I could hardly imagine they'd have anything in common.

Taishi nodded to my sister. "Even so, I'm betting Faith has enough sense not to fall for him."

I stifled a laugh.

Meriwether clapped loudly when they were done. "Lovely, just lovely. Miss Earnshaw, would you be so kind to sing for us?"

She shook her head and stared at the floor.

"You know I think highly of your voice. Please sing for us. Please. For me?"

She blushed. She almost succeeded in keeping the smile from her lips. As soon as she began to sing, I knew the song. It was an Irish lullaby my mother had sung to us when we were children. The memory came to me unbidden. How funny our minds are that they might contain things we don't even know we can remember until something sparks it for us.

Michi hugged my arm and smiled up at me. I ruffled her blonde hair.

The tune was the same, but Faith had changed the words to Jomon. I could only guess so my daughter would understand. On the second refrain, Meriwether joined in. I was just as surprised as everyone else in the room. Not only did he know the song, but he could speak Jomon? It took but a moment to realize he couldn't understand the Jomon words he sang with the way he strung them together and separated them in the wrong places. Still, I gathered he'd heard that song enough times to memorize the sounds. I was now more curious than ever.

His voice was a perfect tenor to accompany my sister's sweet soprano. They made a harmonious duet.

The song put Michi to sleep in my lap. I stroked her hair away from her face. A daughter. I still hadn't gotten over the idea of that. Surely Lord Klark had known once his surgeon explained my condition. I tried not to hate him for Meriwether's sake. But it was impossible knowing everything he had taken from me.

I looked at Taishi's face. He placed an arm around me, seemingly content. Even after apologizing a dozen times earlier, it didn't make me feel any better than I had accused him of being unfaithful. How was it he could still love me? I didn't deserve him.

Michi sighed in her sleep.

Taishi scooped Michi up like she was a rag doll. "I'm taking this one to bed. I'll be back for you in a few minutes." He kissed my cheek.

When the song was over, my sister bowed her head. Sumiko took out her flute and said something to Faith I couldn't hear. My sister arranged her tonkori before her again and they played together.

I watched Meriwether's eyes flicker from my sister to me. His smile turned uneasy. I had known Meriwether well enough in the last seven years to detect guilt, try as he might to hide it.

I kicked him under the table. "You've been keeping a secret from me, haven't you?"
Chapter Twenty-Five

No man is good enough to govern any woman without her consent.

—Susan B. Anthony of the United Worlds of America

"Oh, Felicity dear, I didn't mean to!" he said. He lowered his voice. I scooted around the table so we would be close enough to keep our voices confidential.

"It was the second night here that I heard her singing outside. She was like a ghost in my dreams. I wandered out of my bed and followed the sound of her voice to a little garden—you know, the one with the raccoon dog statue with the—ahem—and I sat there and listened. It was warm and peaceful and I liked the sound of the song. The notes were sad and pretty and expressed the loneliness I felt at that moment. She sang it over and over until I memorized it.

"The next morning I wondered if I had dreamed it and sleep-walked out there. My wife—the wife-swap wife—the one who is really more of a bodyguard, knows a few words here and there. Enough to tell me how displeased she was that I'd wandered off. She made Sumiko tell me how the ghost of a woman as pale as mist wanders around the cliff palace at night singing sad songs and strangling men in their sleep—if they don't do as their wives bid them."

I covered my mouth to hide my smile. He was so easy to play jokes on, it seemed cruel.

He gazed dreamily at Faith playing in the corner. "I heard her the following night again. You know me, I don't believe in ghosts—much. I was scared, but I still had to find her because I was so intrigued. I went to the garden again and listened. At one point she stopped singing in Jomon and sung in English. When she had finished, I asked, 'Are you a ghost?'"

I laughed at Meriwether and he shook his head at himself and laughed too. "There was no answer at first, but then she did answer and she said she was. I asked her if she was there to haunt anyone particular and she said something along the lines of being the voice for all the lost Jomon who were killed on Planet 157. She told me sad stories and I listened." He sighed. "Then the following day while I was hiding from—er, I mean, taking a break from my 'wife,' the children dragged me to some little room to have my fortune told by the wise woman. She was wrapped in furs and her face was covered with scarves. I only saw the vivid blue of her eyes. I leaned closer, thinking for a moment that she was you, but then I saw her eyes were different. One of her eyes . . . well, sagged. I allowed her to tell my fortune. It wasn't a very pleasant fortune. She told me of my past—about how I had found you—and she told me some of who you had been before I came to meet you and how I had stolen your happiness away. I didn't believe many things she said, about you being married and having a family of your own. She told me horrible things about my father." Meriwether swallowed. "I didn't believe these either, only I now know it all to be true."

I took his hand and squeezed it, sorry for the disappointments he surely must be experiencing. Not only had he lost a fiancée, but he'd also lost the ideal of who he thought his father was.

He cleared his throat. "Anyway, I knew from her voice that she was the ghost woman. That night I went early to the garden. I tiptoed as quietly as I could and stole into the shadows. I fell asleep, but woke when she eventually came along. Her feet crunched over fallen leaves and my eyes followed her black silhouette to a door to enter another garden. She didn't sing that night. She wept. I didn't think I could sneak into the garden with that creaky door, so I climbed up the side of the wall.

"The moonlight from the double moons was so pale and bright it illuminated her every feature. And it made her look ghostly and quite striking in the light. It must have caused me such a shock that I fell from the wall and into a soft cushion of plants. She jumped up from the water and was quite startled."

"Wait a minute. You fell down from the wall because you spied on my sister while she was naked in the bathing pool?" I asked.

He glanced at my sister across the room. "Um. . . . Anyway, she was furious. I think she would have slapped me if I hadn't hit my head. Well, I don't remember hitting my head, but I must have. I was dizzy and woozy and I felt drunk."

I shook my head. He'd landed in the memory moss.

A smile spread across his face as he spoke of it. "She started tugging on me and my clothes and before I knew it, she pulled off my shirt. Or maybe I took it off. I can't remember. Then she did something strange to me. Unless I dreamed it from hitting my head." His face sobered and he glanced at her where she played.

I wondered if my sister had intentionally given him a memory or she had been trying to get him out of the bed of moss. Either way she must have given him something memorable. Probably something sad. Of course it wouldn't matter what she'd given him, they would both feel a strong connection to each other afterward. I knew how memory moss relaxed my body. I could only imagine how Meriwether might take it to find a naked woman limp in his arms after the experience of their exchange.

Still, I couldn't imagine they'd done anything more than that. This was my prim and proper sister and even more scrupulous former fiancé. Then again. . . .

Faith continued playing the tonkori but when she looked up, pink tinged her cheeks.

I didn't ask if they'd stopped at an exchange of memories.

"She's the most beautiful woman in the galaxy," he said. "It wouldn't offend you if, well, ahem. I think I may have . . . that is to say. My heart will always be true to you, but. . . ."

Captain Ford chose that ill-timed moment to stomp in uninvited. "Someone has been using my comm unit. And that someone has twenty-two messages from various Jeffersons across the galaxy as well as a few from the U.W.A. And might I add that quite a few of my tri-tip steaks are missing."

I listened to each of the messages with my sister, Meriwether and Taishi. Captain Ford grumbled about how many of his sub-space minutes these messages used up. On the plus side, incoming messages in Captain Ford's comm station were now classified as a priority in the most elite and noble families in the galaxy. He wasn't even a princess.

Many messages were from cousins, aunts, uncles, and distant relatives, some whom expressed surprise that my sister and I were alive, others that they wondered if they had seen me in the distance at a ballet on New Campton Manor Station, or thought they caught a glimpse of a woman who looked like my mother. Many didn't know that I had even been born. More importantly, they all offered support in establishing Planet 157 as its own independent planet, and aid to keep the native colonists from extinction.

It was my grandmother's enigmatic message that simply said, "Call me at once," that both excited and alarmed me.

I reached over to press the button to move on to the next message.

"Well?" Faith asked. "Aren't you going to answer that one? She said 'at once' and that means at once."

"We still have sixteen more messages to listen to. Don't you think we should at least see if one of the leaders from the United Worlds has more important news?" I asked.

Meriwether and Taishi exchanged bemused glances.

"What?" I asked.

Taishi winked. "You've just been reunited with your sister and you're already squabbling like children, ne?"

"We are not!" Faith said.

Because I knew it would vex her I added, "Are too!"

She scowled, but seeing me giggle she couldn't keep a straight face and laughed. It was nice to see her happy. It reassured me to see her lose her self-consciousness for a few minutes.

"Call them back," Meriwether said. "I'll wait out in the hall to give you privacy with your grandparents. They might not welcome the sight of me after they learn, well, what you've shared with them about my father."

Taishi cleared his throat. "I will stay if you wish it, but I do not want to intrude. They may not speak as freely if the leader of the Jomonjin is present." He bowed his head and followed Meriwether out.

Faith and I looked to Captain Ford.

"What?" he asked. "Surely they won't mind a captain being present. It is my ship."

Meriwether entered the bridge once again and escorted the captain out.

"Well, I never! This is my ship. A captain has a right to be on his own bridge."

I swallowed. My sister squeezed my hand. She positioned herself so the more presentable side of her face was angled toward the screen and her hair fell over the other half.

I called Lady Petunia Jefferson. She took but a few seconds to answer. Her image came onto the screen, a genteel-looking lady in her seventies. Her silver hair was piled on top of her head and ringlets framed her face. I'd never paid much attention to gowns, but I had a feeling hers was uncomfortable. Her waist was so small and bosom so wide, she surely achieved the perfect body that Meriwether's sisters strived for with an extremely rigid corset.

"My goodness!" she exclaimed. "You both are present." She sat up taller and put on her spectacles. Her lips parted and her eyes filled with tears. "Oh, dear me! You look just as your mother when I saw her last." I glanced at Faith who kept her good side turned to the screen. In truth she looked far more like our mother than I did with my freckles and darker shade of blonde hair.

"Allow me to introduce myself. I am Lady Petunia Jefferson, wife of the newly elected president of the United Worlds, chair of the alien suffrage movement, and mother of the late Clementine Jefferson."

There was a pause. I realized she waited for us to say something. Faith bowed her head in the Jomon style. "It is a pleasure to meet you. My name is Faith Earnshaw and this is my sister, Felicity Earnshaw."

Another pause. I thought maybe she wanted us to say more. I forgot about the slight delay as the message bounced through hyperspeed points. We all started speaking at once. With the delay in speech, it only made matters worse.

"You first," she said.

"No, you."

"Very well." Lady Jefferson said. "I would like to first explain that I pursued contact with you at an earlier date, but it had been made known to my husband and myself that Faith and Clementine were deceased. I was told by Lord Klark that you, Felicity, wanted nothing to do with us for, well, ahem, to put it bluntly, for disowning your mother. In fact, on the occasions that I did send messages, letters and gifts, they were never acknowledged."

Another pause.

"Nor were they received," I added.

She nodded. "In light of the facts I now possess, this makes more sense. I queried Lord Klark many times about your health and if you would see me, but he explained how fragile and traumatized you were, what with the ordeals you went through on the planet, being attacked by men he said were posing as natives. He was kind enough to show me photos and even videos of you and . . . I must profess you did appear sullen and in quite a depression. He assured me that with time, he was certain you would want to see us. In fact, he even scheduled a date I was to come visit, but you took ill—or so he said—and then he scheduled another, and he had that emergency business trip." Her lips pressed into a thin line, making her as formidable as Shoko Nipa. "You can quite imagine my displeasure with the man."

I nodded.

Pause.

I bowed my head, then stopped myself from executing the Jomon gestured I'd grown so accustomed to and made myself sit up. "Pardon my forwardness in asking, but I must inquire about the political status of the planet. I don't know what Lord Klark will do once he finds out that I have contacted—"

She waved me off dismissively. "Yes, yes, your grandfather is seeing to that. He has the fastest ships in the fleet on the way to set up borders in space around the planet. What I would like to know is when we can visit? I would like to see my granddaughters."

I smiled, "And a great-granddaughter."

Her expression didn't change.

When she did receive my words through the delay, it was clear by her wide eyes. She tipped out of view of the screen and there was a thud. A lady's maid came rushing over.

She must have fainted. That did tend to be a side effect of properly fitted corsets.
Chapter Twenty-Six

Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence.

―George Washington, former president of the United Worlds of America

Taishi kneeled before me and held my face in his hands. "What memory should I give you first?" He covered my face in kisses, his every touch tender and loving.

I felt content and happy. I didn't want this moment to end, but I knew it was time for my memories. I couldn't let Taishi keep carrying his burden and my own.

"I want to see my daughter's birth. I want to understand what happened that last time I saw you."

"Very well."

I untied my robe and reclined on the bed of furs. He planted a final kiss on my lips before placing his hands on my chest just below the collar bone. I emptied my mind and allowed the darkness to close in on me.

I stretched up to reach a banana berry in a high branch and felt a warm wetness between my thighs. Liquid poured out of me. I stared in confused embarrassment. Faith's eyes were round with shock. Surely she thought I had lost control of my bladder. Indeed, I thought I had as well. She giggled in nervousness, her scabs stretching tight over her mouth and eyes. With half of her face in bandages and what was exposed crusted and dark, it was hard not to see her appearance as monstrous. Even now, in my strange predicament, I couldn't stop being aware of her face and how I hated myself for being the one to have caused it. The two of us stood there, not knowing what to say or think, when the first stab of pain doubled me over.

The second lance of pain was intolerable.

"I think you're having the baby," Faith said.

Somehow I managed sarcasm. "No. Do you think?"

She helped me to my feet. We made it halfway to the hut when another pain came. Every minute the contractions left me panting and crying. My sister left me and fetched Taishi. I tried my best to be quiet so as not to draw the attention of animals or men, but the pain was unlike anything I'd ever felt.

I didn't even notice when they returned and busied themselves with herbs. I only knew something had changed when Taishi applied the memory moss between my legs and the pain lessened. After hours of labor, though, even that couldn't help. I screamed and said bad words that my father had told me good young ladies didn't repeat. I cursed myself and the baby, and babbled about how I thought I was dying. All the while, I focused on my sister's deformed face, thinking how I'd created a monster. My pretty little sister was ruined because of me. What else would I ruin?

At one point I was aware she held a knife and she kept sobbing. I thought she meant to kill me. I hoped she would kill me to put me out of my misery. After all I'd done, I was convinced I deserved to die.

I was delirious with pain for what felt like an eternity, and then it was over. I fell back in an exhausted heap. Faith washed the baby and made cooing noises at her. She kept talking to me but I didn't listen.

My sister tried to hand me my baby, but my arms were too tired to move. She helped me hold my little girl, positioning my hands where she thought I should support the baby's head. The baby was beautiful and healthy. She had the shape of Taishi's eyes and lips and my chin and nose. Yet I felt no joy in looking at her. I only felt despair. What good was it to bring a child into this hostile world? How could I keep her alive when I didn't know if I could even keep myself alive? I hated myself for every moment I didn't fix what I'd brought upon Taishi's world.

I shoved the baby toward Taishi, wincing at the pain of moving. "I should have taken the medicine the wise woman gave me to get rid of her when she was still in my womb."

Taishi cradled the baby against his chest. He shook his head at me. "You don't know what you're saying. You're in pain. You—"

"I don't want this baby. I can't take care of her!" I began to sob.

"You need to stop. You're making the bleeding worse," Faith said. She unfolded a clean cloth and held it between my legs.

Taishi handed the baby to Faith. He stroked my hair and kissed my face but I turned away. My black mood grew worse over the next few days. Between the depression and the infection that set in, I was inconsolable.

"Let me die," I said. I already felt like I was dying.

Faith pressed a damp cloth to my forehead but it was warm like the air around me.

Taishi took my hand. "Let me take your pain away."

I shook my head. "You can only take away the past. You can't take the present away."

A moment passed before he turned me toward him. He applied a paste to my fingers. I was too tired to resist.

He pressed my hands to his chest. I closed my eyes and slipped into nothingness. For a few seconds I felt peace as I pushed away all the hopelessness. I relived the birthing of my daughter, the hours of the painful delivery, the constant mantra of self-defeat I told myself I was destined to follow. I went back further to the next painful memory and the next. I gave him my sister's accident, every time I had gazed upon her and felt pity for her and self-loathing. Taishi's love radiated before me, sopping up all my sorrow and mistakes. He drank my past away and my black moods slipped into him.

Even when his mind was full and he could stand no more, I kept giving and he continued accepting. With every memory that I released, the load on my heart lightened. At last I relaxed and knew peace.

The empty black world opened and I was once again myself in the stone, Tanukijin palace. I blinked. My limbs felt heavy but not relaxed. The weight pressing on my chest made it difficult to breathe. My heart ached so strongly I thought I must have been physically injured. I placed a hand on my chest to make sure I was really whole.

Taishi Nipa squeezed me to him and I melted into his embrace. My skin was slick with sweat and chilled me in the night air. The oily salve of the memory moss rubbed off on Taishi as I hugged him. Somehow I got it on my cheek. He wiped it off with a finger.

"I'm sorry," I said, choking on the words. "I shouldn't have pushed all that on you." Tears spilled down from my eyes. I couldn't believe I had blamed him. How could I have thought he would do something to hurt me? His every action had been out of love, and I had reacted with suspicion. He must have experienced such disappointment upon my return. Such heartbreak.

I pressed my face against his chest and cried. "I'm so sorry."

"I shouldn't have said yes to more than I could stand." He kissed my nose. "What's done is done. The important thing is we have each other again."

I nodded and kept hugging him. I didn't want to let him go now that I had him.

"There's more memories left," I said. "More sad ones."

"Yes, but I don't need to give them all to you at once. Little by little. Let me give you one of your happy memories now." He reached across me and applied green paste to his hand and held it against my back.

My skin prickled with fire and ice. Warmth spread into my muscles and down my spine. I closed my eyes. Already I could spell the perfume of midori melon and sakura blossoms. The air was warm and humid, but my world was dark. Soft yielding lips planted kisses against mine.

I was certain what kind of happy memory this would be.
Chapter Twenty-Seven

The highest compact we can make with our fellow is: Let there be truth between us two for evermore.

–Ralph Waldo Emerson, Earth Colony VI

After a celebratory day that included feasting, dancing and play fighting, Taishi Nipa donned his tanuki mask and sat before the assembly of his people. I sat in the front row with Captain Ford and Meriwether. I would have liked for my sister and daughter to sit with me, but they sat with Sumiko to Taishi's left. The elders insisted on the formality.

One of the elders announced, "It is now time to determine the results of the wife-swap. Nipa, do you wish to establish trade with Meriwether-san?"

Taishi bowed. "Based on the information I was given by my temporary wife, I would say that Meriwether Nipa's intentions are honorable and respectable." He emphasized the word for leader, which indicated he considered Meriwether an equal. "With his gifts and goodwill he paid my tribe with many favors in which we are indebted to him. We would consider bartering with his people in the future and will welcome him back again."

I translated.

The elder asked, "Does Meriwether Nipa still wish to pursue trade with the Tanukijin and from there, the remaining Jomonjin tribes of the planet?"

Meriwether did his best at a bow while cross-legged, a slightly ungraceful if well-meant gesture. "If our presence doesn't disrupt the culture of the Tanukijin, my people would be honored to continue peaceful relations. We would like to return to our ship and offer more goods and services at a future date."

Taishi Nipa nodded in approval after I had translated.

A hint of mischief showed in the old man's eyes. "Now that the business of the wife-swap is complete, we come to the matter of the wives themselves, no? Have you anything to say about this Nipa?"

"As great a loss as it would be to lose my present wife—" At Taishi's words, Tomomi came forth and stood beside Taishi. "I must concede that I would prefer the company of Felicity of the Stars as my wife for the rest of my days." He stood and held a hand out to me. "It would make me the happiest man in my province if she would come forth and accept me as her husband."

My heart soared at his words. I felt like a girl hearing him profess his love for me for the first time again.

I started to rise, but Meriwether grabbed my arm. "What did he say?"

"He has formally asked me to be his wife."

"Oh, I see. It wasn't anything about making her my permanent wife?" He nodded to the bodyguard.

Taishi stifled a laugh. Tomomi's blue lip twitched.

I squeezed Meriwether's hand. "No, his words were only about me. I'm sorry, Meriwether. I know that—"

"Go to him," he said. "This is where you belong." His smile was full of sincere warmth.

I walked to the front of the room and took Taishi's outstretched hand. More than anything I wanted to kiss him, but I knew it would not do in front of this crowd when such an act was unheard of.

The elder bowed. "Tomomi Sensei, wife of our great leader, what do you say to the matter of a permanent marriage to Meriwether Nipa?"

Tomomi nodded. The crowd gave in to giggles.

Meriwether's eyes narrowed. "What? What did they just say?"

I was laughing too hard myself to translate.

He shook his head ferociously. This only made people laugh louder. Meriwether crossed his arms. "I will not be given a woman who was not mine to have in the first place. I know she is not Nipa's true wife, nor a blood relative, and for that reason, the transaction is void. The exchange was meant to give one of equal value to the one who was taken from me."

Taishi Nipa looked from me to him.

"I know you can understand me. Don't pretend you can't," Meriwether said.

I translated for the benefit of the crowd. Some people laughed. The elderly nodded appreciatively.

"Clever," Sumiko said with approval.

Meriwether sat up taller. "If Taishi Nipa is to have my intended wife, then it is only fair that I should be allowed his geari wife for a period of one fortnight. If I determine her to be to my liking and I am to hers, then I might agree to a permanent wife-swap." He smiled in triumph.

I translated. All eyes turned to Faith.

"What say you to this?" the elder inquired.

Faith stood, tall and proud as any queen. Meriwether rose. His eyebrows arched high in hope.

She stopped before Meriwether. Her hair fell back from her face and she made no move to hide herself from him. She spoke in English. "You would promise to love me? All of me?"

He took her hand and nodded.

She lifted her chin higher, a stubborn determination crossing her aspect that I well recognized from our youth. "I will not consent to be any man's temporary wife. I find the tradition of tsuma no kokan to be detestable and scandalous."

Meriwether dropped to one knee. "What about my permanent wife? Do you think you could find it in your heart to condescend to loving me?"

She laughed and nodded. "There would be no condescending. I am quite sure I have fallen in love with you already."

My heart warmed at the idea that two people who I cared about dearly would come to esteem each other so highly. They both deserved someone who would love them.

Meriwether stood. "And you would be willing to leave your home to come with me?" He held her hand to his heart.

What? I had only just been reunited with my sister. I hated the idea that she should be taken from me so soon. Faith looked from me to him, as if to ask for permission. I pushed down the tears and nodded to her. She smiled, her face glowing with radiance.

She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. The nearest Jomon moved back. Children squealed and covered their eyes. Adults shook their head.

"She eats man flesh!" one woman cried out.

Faith had finally found her white knight who would love her unconditionally, and Meriwether had found his exotic heiress who would appreciate being rescued. My heart was near to bursting with happiness for them both.

Taishi Nipa waved at the musicians and they played a rowdy tune that incited laughing and dancing. Taishi tugged me toward the wall. He pushed aside a woven tapestry of geometric designs much like those that covered my arms. On the other side he kissed me.

"And you, my Felicity of the Stars?" he asked. "Will you condescend to love me?"

I nodded. "I loved you when we were young, I loved you across the galaxy and I fell in love with you again, not even knowing it was you. More than anything, I wish to be with you for the rest of my days." I smoothed a hand over his square jaw. "Though, I hope you won't mind a compromise on the inclusion of electricity, plumbing, my frilly bed covers, and a comm unit to make intergalactic calls."

"I am willing to make any compromise you request." He made a face. "Only . . . you are in jest when you speak of those unnatural bed covers, no?"

I wrapped my arms around his neck and planted kisses along his jaw. "And if another tribe comes who wishes to enact tsuma no kokan, will you consent to trade your wife for a fortnight?" I teased.

"It always must be consensual with the wives." His expression turned serious. "I suspect Tomomi will not mind, ne?"

I tilted back my head laughing. He dropped his mask to the floor. There was no memory moss involved, but my entire body tingled as he kissed me again.

The End

Afterward

The ideas in the Memory Thief series were percolating in my head for years before I got around to writing the novel. I have always been fascinated by foreign cultures and was inspired by my Freshman science teacher, Mr. Tebor, who served in the Peace Corps. I wasn't able to study abroad while in high school or college, and I knew I didn't have any valuable skills to offer the Peace Corps since I graduated with a BFA in illustration, so I pursued the dream to go abroad by teaching English in South Korea and then later in Japan. Because I am originally from the Portland, Oregon area and Sapporo is Portland's sister city, it was a logical location to apply for a teaching job. Plus, I had a friend already in the JET Program in a city nearby. It felt a little less scary to go to the island of Hokkaido where there was someone I knew. I didn't know much about Japan, aside from pop culture, but I had heard of Sapporo's snow festival years before when I had a teacher in college who had participated and gave a presentation on it. I soon learned that while Hokkaido was temperate like Oregon from May to September, the rest of the year it snowed. And snowed.

And snowed.

While other _gaijin_ (foreign) English teachers were out buying manga, partying and singing karaoke, I was going to museums and attending tea ceremonies. (Okay, so I also was going to breakdance classes too, but that is a different story.) I loved learning about the ancient culture and history of Japan and the local people who predated the second wave of Japanese who immigrated to the islands. When I went to the Ainu village in Hokkaido as a tourist, I was fascinated by the idea of indigenous Japanese who were Japan's version of Native Americans. The plight and cultural extinction of these people inspired and influenced my writing.

The Jomon people in our world immigrated to Japan 14,000 years ago, though some sources suggest they may have done so as far back as 30,000 years ago. The Jomon became the Ainu of Japan, spread to the Pacific Islands and became the indigenous peoples of North America. Today's Ainu are known for unusual, non-Asian characteristics such as fair skin, being harrier, having bigger noses or other European characteristics—some even having blue eyes. Archeologic evidence of skeletal and facial characteristics have shown the earliest Americans also had more European characteristics, and more recently, genetic evidence has shown the first Americans may have been more European than Asian.

Anywhere from 2,000-5,000 years ago, the second wave of immigrants called the Yayoi, spread to Japan and the Americas, slowly assimilating and destroying the first wave of peoples, not so different from what the Europeans did to the Native Americas in my own culture.

Living in Japan has influenced my writing greatly and I often find I am writing about experiences of feeling like an alien in another culture. The Jomon of The Memory Thief series are a mixture of Jomon and Yayoi, a blend of modern Japanese and Korean cultures with the Ainu of Japan and the Inuit of America.

Glossary of Jomon Terms for The Memory Thief

The Jomon language in the story is influenced by Japanese, Ainu and Chinese language.

Anata—"you," also is a term of endearment like "sweetheart."

Ano—"um" or "well" or "uh." When I lived in Hokkaido, which is the island in Japan where Ainu still live, this was used more than "eeto" used elsewhere in Japan.

Attush—a kind of robe made of a handspun fabric in the Ainu language.

Aynu/ Ainu—people native to Japan who immigrated during the Jomon era.

Aynu-Mosir—land of the humans in Ainu language.

Eboshi—a kind of hat, in the story it is a ceremonial headdress.

Baka—an insult like fool.

Beigoma—a top spinning game for children.

Buta—pig.

Chan—informal honorific used to address a child or a cute woman.

Cep—fish in the Ainu language.

Chin chin—child's term for penis

Chiramantep—bear in Ainu, in the story they are blue with tusks and claws.

Cikap—bird in Ainu, in this story they are leathery.

Dosha kuzure—mudslide, in the story it is used to describe someone who overshares in memory exchange.

Gaijin—derogatory term for foreigner.

Gaiyojin—made up world meaning "other world people" based on the existing term gaikokujin.

Gaki—a brat.

Giri/geari—social obligation, in the story the geari wife is a woman one is obliged to care for.

Gomen nasai—excuse me.

Hana ichi monme—a game similar to red rover.

Hashi—chop sticks.

Hebi—snake, in the story a creature like a snake.

Heri-shichi or Furi-shichi—how the name Felicity would translate into Japanese.

Heisu—how the name Faith would translate to Japanese.

Hoku—husband in Ainu,.also called hoku-yuk

Isepo—rabbit in Ainu.

Iya!—Expression of surprise.

Jin—suffix added to a word that means "people." Example Cepjin means Fish People.

Jomon—people from an era in Asia named after their rope braiding impressions left in clay vessels. This might be between 14,500 and 300 BC, though some sources suggest up to 30,000 years ago.

Kamuy—spirit, soul, demon in Ainu.

Kawaii—cute or adorable.

Kun—informal honorific used to address a male child.

Mei—niece.

Midori—green.

Ne?—Right? No?

Nipa—chief/leader in Ainu.

Noren—a kind of curtain used to cover windows and doors, usually with a vertical slit going down the center.

Ohajiki—a pebble game for children.

Onsen—a hot spring or hot bath.

Otemae—or temae, the art of serving tea. O is an honorific given to this art.

Sake—sweet wine.

Sakura—cherry blossoms or a flower like them on the world.

San—honorific added to the end of the name like Mr. is added before a name in English.

Sama—formal honorific used to address someone of honor.

Satsumaimo—sweet potato.

Sensei—teacher.

Shochu—whiskey (in our world made from rice).

Sumimasen—"excuse me" or "sorry" or "thank you and I'm sorry to cause you so much trouble on my behalf."

Tadaima—I'm home or here I am: it is how people greet one another when entering their own home.

Tanuki—raccoon dog/badger, in the story they are green and purple and have horns and tusks.

Tatsu—dragon, to build, to stand, or erection: there are many uses for this word and the wrong meaning is used in Japanese puns.

Tiaju—a kind of tree, in the fictional story they look like umbrellas.

Tokkoni—snake in Ainu.

Tonkori—a stringed instrument played by Ainu women.

Tsuma no kokan—a made up term meaning "wife swap."

Ume—plum.

Unko—feces.

If you enjoyed The Memory Thief please leave a review on the online retailer where you purchased this collection. You might also enjoy free short stories published by the author on her website: http://sarinadorie.com/writing/short-stories. Readers can hear updates about current writing projects and news about upcoming novels and free short stories as they become available by signing up for Sarina Dorie's newsletter at:

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Other novels written by the author can be found at:

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# About the Author

During her childhood, Sarina Dorie dreamed of becoming an astronaut/archaeologist/fashion designer/illustrator/writer. Later in life, after realizing this might be an unrealistic goal, Sarina went to the Pacific NW College of Art where she earned a degree in illustration. After realizing this might also be an unrealistic goal, she went to Portland State University for a master's in education to pursue the equally cut-throat career of teaching art in the public school system. After years of dedication to art and writing, most of Sarina's dreams have come true; in addition to teaching, she is a writer/artist/ fashion designer/ belly dancer. She has shown her art internationally, sold art to Shimmer Magazine for an interior illustration, and another piece is on the April 2011 cover of Bards and Sages.

Sarina has sold over a hundred short stories to markets like Daily Science Fiction, Fantasy and Science Fiction Magazine, and Orson Scott Card's Intergalactic Medicine Show. Sarina's novel, Silent Moon, won four contests through various chapter of RWA. It is now published by Soulmate Publishing. Her YA fantasy novel, Dawn of the Morning Star has come out with Wolfsinger Publishing and Urban Changeling is available online.

Now, if only Jack Sparrow asks her to marry him, all her dreams will come true.

Information about Sarina Dorie's fantasy novels Silent Moon, Dawn of the Morningstar, Urban Changeling, and short stories can also be found at:

http://www.sarinadorie.com

A Sneak Preview of

The Geari Wife

The Japanese word "giri," or "geari" originating from Earth, refers to guilt or social obligation. When the Jomon spacefarers travelled from Earth millennia ago and established a colony on Aynu-Mosir, we believe their culture evolved in such a manner that many old customs became blended with new ones. One such example is the idea of a "geari wife," a wife one marries out of social obligation."

—excerpt from Meriwether Klark's message to the publishers of The Guidebook of Colonization and Interplanetary Relationships, Fifth Edition

The starship loomed like a tombstone on the barren plain above the Tanukijin tribe's canyon palace. The brass rivets holding the solar sails in place and the gothic archways around doors and portholes were as alien to this world as I was. I supposed I must have looked like a picturesque embodiment of an American bride in my long gown and puff sleeves. Yet more than ever, I felt I'd gone so far native I'd never be able to fully return to my own culture. After being on the planet of Ayunu-Mosir for fourteen years, I should have been happy to finally be able to depart with a handsome fiancé who would someday inherit a space station.

Indeed, whenever anyone looked upon my visage, I did my best to smile like a star-struck, ugly duckling turned Cinderella about to live happily ever after. If only that were true.

A commotion of natives bundled in furs made a bucket brigade-like procession down the snowy slope to the cliff palace below, handing off boxes of vaccines and provisions of the food from the captain's stores onboard.

"Have a care not to drop that one. It's full of glass vials," Meriwether, my new fiancé, said to one of the native colonists as though the man might understand.

Meriwether was a handsome man, of no more than five and twenty years. His face was unblemished and pale as the snow that plagued the planet.

He smoothed his long brown hair from his face and secured his top hat on his head when a gust of wind threatened to dismount it. He pointed to another crate. "Capital. I see you've found our supply of—" He tripped over his own feet, soliciting a laugh from watching villagers. "Dear me, I'm so clumsy, aren't I?" His façade of cheery mirth didn't match his unsmiling eyes.

I lingered just within the ship where it was warm, but I could observe Meriwether's interactions outside. There was one reason I had agreed to marry Meriwether Klark, a man I thought so little of, and that was for revenge. My motivation painted the world around me in a dark gloom, like a dark wash of oil paints that only I could see.

The captain of the spaceship ran past me and chased after two men heaving a crate of frozen food out the door. I ducked back before I was run over.

"Not that! That's my private supply of beef brisket." Captain Ford pulled at his wily, gray whiskers in vexation as men carried off packages from the freezer. His accent was American, though more coarse than my own.

I pretended to examine clicking gears exposed in the hallway. Two dark-haired women worked to pry the metal wall covering loose and pillage the metal out from under the captain's nose. Such a trick would bring them honor among their tribe. I did my best to keep my face blank and not smile at their mischief.

Captain Ford poked a finger at Meriwether's chest. "Order them to bring it back."

"I will, of course, pay handsomely for everything we gift the Tanukijin." Meriwether fidgeted with his top hat and affected an air of sympathy that I didn't believe for a minute. "And if you wish to ever return to this planet and be granted more of the red diamonds. . . ."

He didn't have to say more. The captain turned away and assisted the men in selecting finer cuts of meat.

The greed of star men disgusted me.

Once all the goods and livestock were packed up in the cargo holds, and the machines and medical supplies for the Tanukijin had been carried off, it was time for goodbyes. I had spent an intimate breakfast with my dearest family and friends in the morning, followed by a departure speech to the entire tribe in the afternoon. Now I had to say a final good bye.

My sister wore the Tanukijin style of dress. Felicity clad herself in loose furs that exposed her arms and legs. Her long, blonde hair fell to her waist in thick waves, wild like her nature whereas mine where tied tight in a braid behind my head.

When Felicity had been kidnapped from the planet fourteen years before, I'd thought I would never see her again. And now that we were at last reunited, she'd been the one to stay, whereas I'd known I would have to go.

Felicity kissed my cheek—the unscarred side of my face and smoothed my hair out of my eyes. Her forearms were black with the ink of new tattoos—something that would have made our father roll over in his grave if he could see them.

Already she was falling into the Jomon lifestyle, whereas I had taken up the off-world style I'd longed to return to. The pink dress from her wardrobe I wore was slightly large, but I didn't mind. She hugged me again only hesitating slightly before kissing the scar tissue over the right side of my face.

It was hard for her to look upon, not merely because half my face was raw and shiny from the old burns, but also because she had caused the accident in which I'd received these scars. I turned my pretty side toward her so she could gaze on that instead.

I squeezed her fingers. "When I am living in the stars, I will think of you as I advocate for the Jomon. I will fight for your cause," I said. After all, if I failed, my own sister would be left behind to suffer the same fate I had in all the years I'd been left behind. She deserved better than being left with so little.

She cupped my cheeks in her hands. "You don't have to be alone anymore. We have the tools and supplies to install a communication device on Aynu-Mosir. You and I can use up all the captain's subspace minutes calling each other back and forth." Her laugh ended in a choked sob.

I hugged her one more time. I determined I would not cry. She was now the younger one, the damaged sister who had lost so much. Still so young due to the slowing of time during her space travel, she was naïve and fragile. I would be the strong one and make it up to her. That's why I had to leave. It's why I had to kill Meriwether's father, Lord Archibald Klark for all the vile things he had done, if not for me, for her. And if not for her, for the people of the planet who had suffered so much at his hands. For as long as I could remember, I had dreamed of murdering Lord Klark. I would make sure his cruelty never touched these people again. Nor would his son's.

Of course, it would have been nice to know exactly why I hated Lord Klark. There was a time when I'd known, but those memories were no longer with me. They'd been taken from me using the Jomon herb, memory moss.

I would, of course, get them back from Meriwether Klark. I didn't know how just yet, but I would have to contrive a way. It was a little difficult to plan on assassinating his father without knowing why I had always wished to do so.

Taishi Nipa stood next in line to say good bye to me. He wore his eboshi, the headdress that represented his rank. The eboshi was made of a tanuki head, a green and purple striped raccoon dog, which concealed the upper half of his face like a mask.

He bowed to me, low and deliberate, a gesture he bestowed to few as leader. He spoke in Jomon. "It has been an honor to know you. I wish you luck in your new life."

"Thank you, Nipa." I said, using his formal title. "And good luck to you and your future happiness with your new bride." I returned the Jomon custom of bowing. It felt paltry in comparison to all I wished to say to him.

"Ha! More like old bride," he said with a wink. Perhaps reunited bride would have been more accurate.

Meriwether cleared his throat from behind me, no doubt impatient for these final goodbyes to be over. I ignored him. I wasn't going to be rushed.

Sumiko, Taishi Nipa's sister, waited behind them. She was alone. She was the only one who didn't look sad out of all of them.

Nowhere in sight was my niece. I dropped the formalities. "Where's Michi?"

I looked to my sister. Tears filled Felicity's eyes and she shook her head. The absence of the niece I had raised in my sister's stead stung me like barbs of the yellow needle bush.

Taishi supplied the truth, as he was often wont to do. "My daughter is gaki, ne? She couldn't have her way and then refused to see you off."

"What did she ask for this time?"

Taishi's mouth turned up in a half smile. "Michi demanded I order you to stay."

I laughed to hide my hurt. More than anything I would have liked to stay and protect her, to see her grow into a young lady, but she had a mother again. She didn't need two. What she needed was someone to advocate on behalf of her planet so she would have an adulthood. So all the Jomon would.

Taishi circled an arm around my shoulder and hugged me to his side. "I will miss you, little sister."

Sumiko clasped her hands together waiting patiently. Her usual beatific smile played on her lips, giving away no sign of what she truly felt. She wore layers of fur over the woven bark fiber attush robe, though such attire must have been sweltering on the ship. As soon as I was done saying goodbye to Felicity and Taishi, she drew me aside.

Taishi turned his back, as though giving his sister privacy. Either that or he was cross with her about some matter. He spoke quietly to my sister, Felicity. What he said to her, she must not have liked because her spine went rigid.

Sumiko threw her arms around me and buried her face in my blond hair. Tears filled my eyes, despite my effort to be stoic. If there was one I would miss more than any others, it would be my best friend.

She spoke in Jomon. "Don't cry, Faith-chan. I will always be with you, ne?"

"And I with you." I dabbed at my eyes with my handkerchief.

A sly smile snaked across Sumiko's lips. "Especially since I'm coming with you on your trip."

I gasped. "No. You can't. Who will care for Michi? And my sister? You must stay and take care of Felicity."

Sumiko took my hands in hers. "My brother will take care of Felicity. Who will take care of you?"

I glanced at Meriwether who was stumbling over his feet in the entryway. I tried not to let contempt cross my countenance.

Sumiko snorted. "Exactly." Though she spoke in Jomon, she lowered her voice, lest she be overheard. "You don't love him. I don't know why you've got it in your head you have to do this, but you aren't leaving here on your own. I'm coming with you."

"You don't understand. I have to do this . . ." My throat tightened. "Alone."

"So you can make trouble out there in space without any friends? I think not."

Meriwether placed a hand on my shoulder. "Are you almost ready? The captain wishes to depart before anyone carries off the engine." He chuckled at his own joke.

I looked to Sumiko and shook my head before she said anything.

Sumiko nodded to him. "Do you expect me to keep silent and stow myself away?"

"No, I expect you to stay where it's safe."

"Nowhere is safe. Besides, if you think space is the more dangerous and that is where you will be, so shall I." She lifted her chin.

Meriwether looked from me to Sumiko, eyebrows raised.

Sumiko held herself taller. She spoke in English, her words heavily tainted by her accent. "I am Nipa's sister, a Jomon princess. You will need an ambassador representing the planet of Aynu-Mosir on legal matters, no?"

Meriwether rubbed at his smooth chin. "If I am to understand you, you wish to leave your home and come with us?" He stared off into the distance, his eyes narrowing in thought. As much as I wanted to refuse Sumiko, if he should do so, I determined I would insist. "Does Nipa know of your plan?"

Taishi Nipa turned and bowed upon hearing his title.

Meriwether threw up his hands in exasperation. "Why am I always the last to know everything?"

"What? We're to have one more aboard?" Captain Ford demanded, coming in from outside. "There won't be enough food. Where are those packages of beef brisket? Tell the natives to bring them back."

