

### Relationship with God:

### Humility

### By

### Jesus (AJ Miller)

Published by

Divine Truth, Australia at Smashwords

http://www.divinetruth.com/

Copyright 2014 Divine Truth

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

Thank you for downloading this ebook. You are welcome to share it with your friends. This book may be reproduced, copied and distributed. If you enjoyed this book, please return to Smashwords.com to discover other works by this author. Thank you for your support.

### This ebook is a transcript of a seminar delivered on the 14th November 2009 in Buderim, Australia, by Jesus (also known as AJ Miller) as part of the Relationship with God series, focusing on Humility. It describes how humility is essential for our spiritual progression and our relationship with God.

### Reminder From Jesus & Mary

### Jesus and Mary would like to remind you that any document produced by Divine Truth containing any information from Jesus, Mary or any other person includes only a portion of God's Truth that they have personally discovered.

### It does not and cannot contain the entire of God's Truth since God's Truth is infinite and humankind will forever continue to discover more of God's Truth as we progress in receiving more of God's Love.

### Please remember that due to these limitations information contained within this document may need to be revised in the future.

### Many other ebooks have been published by Divine Truth, including ebooks translated into a variety of different languages.

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Table of Contents

### Humility: Part 1

1. Introduction

2. The three basics for receiving Divine Love

3. Humility is a sincere and passionate desire and longing to experience all of our own emotions

4. Humility is seeing ourselves as God sees us

4.1. Humility is not humiliation

5. Humility is being as we truly are

5.1. The reasons for families' resistance to the Divine Love Path

6. The importance of humility for our progression

7. Anger is a sign of a lack of humility

8. Judgement is a lack of humility

9. Giving and receiving truth

10. Friendship

11. Fear of truth impedes humility

12. The importance of Divine Truth

13. Being overwhelmed enables the soul to grow

14. The power of growing in love

15. Lacking faith impedes humility

16. Emotional processing in men and women

16.1. Emotional processing in gay couples

17. Truth "police"

18. Judgement and processing emotions

### Humility: Part 2

19. Humility is having the desire to be taught by God

20. Humility is allowing ourselves to be overwhelmed

21. Humility is an ability to receive direct and indirect counsel

21.1. Differences between emotional progression on Earth and in the spirit world

22. Humility is seeing ourselves as we truly are

22.1. Ways that we avoid seeing our true soul condition

22.2. The Law of Compensation, the Law of Repentance and the Law of Grace

23. Humility is taking responsibility for the harm we have perpetrated towards others

24. Humility is taking responsibility for all emotions within our souls

25. Humility is essential for our progression

26. Spirit influence towards the people on the Divine Love Path

26.1. Dealing with negative spirit influence

26.2. Spirits can pretend to give us Divine Love

26.3. Spirits can pretend to be assisting us

26.4. Spirits constantly surround us

26.5. Positive spirit influence

26.6. Humility protects us from negative spirit influence

27. Closing Words

Appendix: Seminar Outline

Humility: Part 1

1. Introduction

Well how are all of you feeling today? Challenged? Glad to be here? Some of you! What I feel from many of you is that there is still a real struggle with emotions and sometimes getting into the emotions, sometimes into the anger and sometimes into the fear.

Well I thought I'd first tell you how I'm feeling. I'm feeling terrible today actually. I really wanted today to be a really good session for everyone, because of all the subjects I can speak of, the subject today is one of the most important subjects in terms of your own progression with God. And the subject today by the way is, "Relationship with God," and I'm focussing on the area of the relationship with God called, "Humility". It's one of the big three things in terms of your progression, humility. It's one of the three big things. Remember the first thing is Divine Love, the next one is Divine Truth and then the third one that we always look at is humility, and so it's one of the three big issues that you need to face in your own life, if you want to come to God. And because of that I wanted to present it in a nice easy flowing manner, but Mary and I have had so many emotions come up this week, and I've gone through so many emotions in the last few days that I've gone into this little hurt childlike state that I'm still in. So I'm finding it very hard to even feel what the subject's all about, and so I don't know how today's presentation's going to go. To be frank with you! I hope that somehow we'll work our way through it and hopefully some of God's Truth can flow as it normally does, but I can't promise that today. And fortunately I've typed up an outline of what was meant to be done today and it's downloadable on the internet, so if you want to know what I should have said today, then you can go and download that.

When I get into this state usually what I do is stay home, but staying home means cancelling the session and cancelling the session usually means a few hundred people, who have made plans, get all their plans all harmed. And we were down here already before this emotion came up for me, it came up yesterday and we were already down in Brisbane. By the way we were down there seeing 2012. Anybody seen that yet? Interesting don't you think? So obviously a movie like that is going to bring up all sorts of different subjects for you in terms of emotional triggers. So a few weeks ago we said how are you going with your fear? How's everyone doing with that? Starting to focus on dealing with some of those fears or, you still confronting them? "What fear? I haven't got any fear!" And so hopefully what tomorrow's subject will be, will be focussing a little more on how to help you with your fears, so tomorrow's subject is, "Fears, Emotions and False Beliefs," and what I want to do tomorrow is demonstrate the linkage that we have inside of us, in our soul, between the false belief that we actually hold on to, and the emotional reason why we hold on to it. And so hopefully it will help you actually identify some of your fears, if you are struggling to identify your fears. All you need to do is look at your false beliefs and you'll soon find your fears, and so it's a way of discovering some of your fears and working your way through them.

2. The three basics for receiving Divine Love

So that will be tomorrow, but today's subject as I said is, "Relationship with God – Humility". So what I'd like to do first is just have a few reminders about how God's Love flows into your soul. So remember how God's Love flows? So here's God, here's your soul (AJ draws on the whiteboard), your little soul's getting round now it's no longer oval, that's me; that's my true self. So how does God's Love flow into our soul again? It's through this connector that happens, isn't it? So that connector is called the Holy Spirit. Now that connector, can you see that, that connector is like an energetic connection between God and yourself and it's a conduit. It's not a person; it's a conduit for love. So when that connection occurs, the Divine Love, God's Love, can flow through to your soul, but there are three primary requisites for the Divine Love flowing into your soul. What are they?

The first thing is a longing or desire for God's Love. Now many of us have not too much trouble with that concept that we need to long for Divine Love to receive it. A lot of people though have the assumption that they are receiving it even though they are not longing for it, and that's not a truth. But once we start understanding the importance of longing for love inside of us... and when you think about it, it's a bit like a relationship isn't it? When you're in a relationship you long for the other person's love, don't you? You long for them to love you when you are in that relationship, and you long to give them your love, so there's a common thing that get's set up in terms of desire. So most of us don't have too much trouble with that longing for Divine Love, with the exception of those of us who have a bit, or a lot, of unworthiness to deal with and obviously we feel unworthy to long for love. That's one of the impediments we have in that level.

The three requirements for receiving Divine Love from God into our souls

The second thing though is what? Longing for Divine Truth. Now that's a lot more difficult for most people, longing for God's Truth, why is that so difficult? Because most of the time we are heavily emotionally invested in our own error. In other words we want to believe that our error is true, so we are heavily emotionally invested. When we are heavily emotionally invested, what do we finish up doing? We start disallowing truth from entering our soul and tomorrow we'll talk about that, how we go through this process of stopping truth from entering our soul.

We also, whenever I've had a talk about Divine Truth and the qualities of Divine Truth, many of you have become very, very upset with the talk and I don't know if you've noticed that. Whenever we start talking about the importance of truth in your life, right across the board, what happens is many of us get really upset and angry. Now, that's a very good indication that we still do not understand the aspects of Divine Truth, the importance of actually seeking truth.

So you can see here (AJ points to the whiteboard) that we're having a longing or a desire for God's Love. Here (AJ points to the whiteboard) we're having a longing or a seeking for Divine Truth. We want to know what God's Truth is no matter how much our life is going to change, even if every single person in our life leaves our life, we will still have a longing for God's Truth. Because when we have a longing for God, our longing for God finishes up taking us over in a way and what happens is, this desire that we have within our soul takes us over so much that it's the most important thing in our life. And I'm not talking about a religious thing here I'm talking about a personal relationship with God that becomes the most important thing in my life. And I am perfectly okay with losing every friend, every family member, my job, and my home, everything just for that relationship. That's how much desire we need to have for truth.

Now the truth is that oftentimes we don't lose those things, it just depends on our Law of Attraction and what kind of emotions we have to work through as to what we lose. But in the end we may have to lose those things because other people around us may judge us, criticise us, and condemn us for what we do and all those kinds of things. And many of you have already seen that happening in your own life, haven't you? Where somebody says, "You know this is all getting to look like a cult," and whatever else. What happens then is you start feeling doubts, and all these different things start coming up for you. And then you start reconnecting with God because this is what it's all about. It's, not about you and me connecting together, although that's part of what will happen, it's actually about God connecting with you and you connecting with God directly, without anybody else being around, that's what it's about. And longing for Divine Truth is a very essential part of that. The third part is the part that everyone finds the most difficult, and that is humility.

So many of us will come to admit to ourselves, "Yes obviously God does love and God therefore must have the highest amount of love," logically speaking. Even if we look at it intellectually God must have the highest amount of love, if all love came from God. And it doesn't matter how much love I have it's going to be a subset of what God has. And if we add this all together, no matter how much love we can generate all together, it's still going to have less love as to what God has, because God is infinite in love. So therefore we have no trouble with the love part generally.

Often we start having trouble with the truth part because we want our truth to be Divine Truth. We want God to come to our point of view. Can you see that happening sometimes in your life? How many times have you been angry so far with God on this path? Now if you're honest with yourself and if you deal with some of your emotions, you'll find that you've been angry with God quite a lot, because quite often what we're doing is saying, "Why has God made is so hard?" Well the truth is the God never made it hard at all, God made it simple; a child can do this. By the time we get to an adult we're finding it hard because we've lost all of those skills as a child, which is to feel its emotion as it goes, to automatically be humble about Truth. A child comes along and says to you, "Mummy how do the stars get created?" and you look up to the heavens and you can say, "Well there was this great big dragon a long time ago and what he did, he had a heap of fire coming out of his mouth, and he dropped a heap of fireballs and they became the stars." Now your child will believe that at that point; why? Because the child is so humble that it doesn't question what it's getting told. Now later in its life it will look back and say, "Well that's obviously not right, dad or mum had problems with that one." But initially they believe pretty much anything that is coming to them. Now the beauty of that from God's perspective is that God is always going to give us truth, so if we're in a child's state and we are emotionally open and accepting, Divine Truth is just going to flow into us like a pipe pumping out water, that's how it's going to be when we're little. But by the time we're grown up what's happened? We've all become jaded, we've all become feeling like you can't trust anything on this planet, you can't trust anybody's motives, you can't trust what anybody's going to do with the truth that I tell them about me and so on. And we become so mistrusting that we can't accept any truth actually, because all these emotions inside of us are blocking the truth from coming into my life emotionally. The way to open all that up is humility and that's why humility is so important.

3. Humility is a sincere and passionate desire and longing to experience all of our own emotions

Now what have I been defining as humility to you? A sincere and passionate desire and longing to experience all of your own emotions, no matter whether they are painful or pleasurable. Now when it comes to the pleasurable ones, many of us have no trouble with those, right? But when it comes to the painful ones, now most of us are having a lot of difficulty. So that's one aspect of humility. I've been saying that to you because that is probably the most important aspect of humility, but today what I'd like to do is discuss with you other aspects of humility as well.

4. Humility is seeing ourselves as God sees us

The second one I'd like to discuss with you is, humility is seeing yourself as God sees you, "warts and all". So quite often when we go up and look in the mirror... and historically of course, if you're a lady, you might go up and look in a mirror and see a few blemishes and what you finish up doing to them if you're going out to dinner or something? You paint them over don't you, many times? And this is what we're used to doing in our personal life; we're so used to painting over our blemishes so nobody else can see them. We sort of hold them really tight and in fact in the end we don't even want to see them, and so we finish up living a life where not even we ourselves are seeing our own blemishes.

Now if we want to become closer to God, and this aspect of humility is this aspect of actually seeing ourselves as God sees us, then I'm going to have to see everything that God sees. Frankly there are a whole lot of very truthful and pure things that God sees within your soul, and by the way that's even in the worst of what we would call evil souls. Of all the people who are evil, God can still see the parts that God created in their soul. Often we can't, can we? We look at a murderer who's just murdered and raped twenty five people... how many of you ladies would have difficulty looking at that person's soul and actually finding something in them that you might find attractive? That would be pretty hard wouldn't it? And even for the men that would be hard too. But the issue often is that we are so focussed on what's external and so focussed on the actions of the person, that we can't see the good inside of the person many times, particularly if that person has personally harmed us in their own life. But then there's this other aspect and that is seeing all the warts, seeing all the ugly bits of ourselves, God sees them too.

Now to God they are not really a part of yourself. So all of these good bits that God can see, God knows God created them and God created them as a permanent part of yourself that you can grow through your own desire. But all of these, let's define them as "bad bits," that we judge as bad bits inside of ourselves, this whole group of bad bits, what happens to those is that God sees them and God knows that one day you won't have them. And by the way, it doesn't matter whether you are on the Divine Love Path or not, one day you won't have them. The day will depend on your longing and desire. The day in terms of how long in the future that is going to be, will be totally dependent upon how much you desire that state to be. So if I don't desire it at all and I take no notice at all about my soul, and take no notice about what's going on in my life, and I don't take any notice of my Law of Attraction, I might take thousands of years to get to that point where those, what we would call evil or badness within us, is all gone.

But if I have a really strong longing and desire to be my pristine self, and I have a really strong longing and desire for God's Love, and a really strong longing and desire for God's Truth... and when I say really strong, I'm saying it's going to be the thing that is the most important thing in your life. Once that happens, you can get to a point very rapidly where none of that damage that has happened to your soul is there inside of it anymore. But the way to get there is via this quality of humility.

Now every time we have a tendency to look at ourselves, we either do one of two things generally. What we do generally is we either start to judge ourselves very negatively, which is actually going to be quite damaging to us in our own progression towards God, or we judge ourselves as if we've got no problems and that also is going to be very damaging in our relationship with God. Can you see we go from one polar opposite really, one to the other; we swing around from one place to the other place when it comes to humility? And to be frank with you, judging yourself as really bad is just as much as a lack of humility, as judging yourself as if you're really good with no problems. Can you see why? Because both are not what God sees in you and if we look from the point of view of the second point, the point of humility being that God sees us completely as we are, then we need to come to see ourselves the same way as God sees us. If I can keep that in mind, then that's going to help me a lot to become humble.

4.1. Humility is not humiliation

Now what's another definition of humility? Is it humiliation? No. So a lot of times when we hear the word humility, we have these negative connotations associated with it because we think we're going to be degraded, but God doesn't want to degrade you, God wants you to be the best you can be. Also, humility isn't sort of like a false thing, like a false representation of how I really am.

5. Humility is being as we truly are

In the first century you used to be walking down the street and on the corner there would be a Pharisee. He'd be kneeling on the ground, tears rolling down his face with his eyes directed heavenward, praying to God out loud so that everyone can hear him on the street corner; that's what they used to do. And everyone used to honour them as a result of that. Now that's what I call a false humility where we are trying to make out that we're humble, when really we're not. And we're doing it for some other reason. In the Pharisees' cases they were doing it for was for glory, they wanted other people to look up to them and they thought this was one way they could achieve it.

Now when you reflect on that today, many of us do the same when you think about it. How many things do we do because somebody else will think we're good doing it? We've got to give up all of that as well, if we're humble; we'll give up all of that, we'll give up defining ourselves through other peoples' eyes.

So in the end when you progress on the Divine Love Path, you may finish up having no friends for a period of time. Trust me it won't be for a very long period, but you will have it. Now why does that happen? Because all of the old friends don't get you anymore. They're saying, "What are you talking about you want to connect to God, God doesn't even exist, what are you trying to do?" What was that book we read about recently? Richard Dawkins book, "The God Delusion".

God doesn't exist. God is a delusion of your own mind. So you'll get your friends saying that. Or you get a lot of your friends projecting at you that you should be a part of their religion or their faith or whatever it is. So you have this interaction that gets set up of emotions where you get condemned for the path you take.

So that might happen for a period of time and are you prepared for that? If you're humble, you are prepared emotionally to experience everything, and if that mean experiencing what it feels like to have no friends; that's one of the things you'll be humble enough to experience. And then you have your family coming along. Now it's great when your family is on the same path as you, but often that doesn't happen at all. Often what happens is the first member of the family has the most difficult time, whoever discovers the Divine Love Path. So what happens when the first member of the family discovers it, everyone in the family get all the literature out about cults, and they hammer you about that. Then they get all the literature about emotions and intellect, and then they hammer you with that. And then they get all this literature out... and you've got a lovely library in the end of all of these different fears that you can deal with, but the truth is that most of the time all they are trying to do is keep you in the same emotional space that you've always been in. And on the Divine Love Path you are an ever expanding soul. So this soul, remember what is it full of? Emotions, passions, desires and longings. Now what's going to happen to that soul? It's going to expand. How does a soul expand? You know the only way a soul expands? By being overwhelmed, by being overwhelmed. Well if you think about it, if you're merrily plodding along and nothing really fazes you is your soul changing? Not really is it? It's when something challenges you and pushes you to another level, that's now when changes occur.

Now your soul on the Divine Love Path is going to have an ever expanding emotional capacity.

5.1. The reasons for families' resistance to the Divine Love Path

Participant: I just wonder why your family members can put out so much resistance to your changing, even if you're looking better and so on.

Where did all of your emotions that you're dealing with come from? Mostly from your environment and your environment is mostly your family. So whenever they see you make a change, there's a feeling change inside of you, and as soon as that feeling change happens, your family feels that change. You don't have to say a word; they're now feeling something different from you. They are now no longer feeling you're the same person. How many have had said to you, "You're not the same person anymore"? Yes many of you; isn't that wonderful! But for some reason when it comes to your family, it's not wonderful, is it? The reason why is because your family have a certain emotional set that is your environment and you grew up in that environment, and now somebody who grew up in that environment is challenging that environment. Of course the first person, who does it, is going to get the most pressure and that's what happens. The first person in any family who's doing it on the Divine Love Path gets the most pressure to get off it.

Now of course after a while you may work through different emotions and then they may notice, "Wow you're actually happier now". Many of you don't feel this is possible still do you? Because you're still miserable right? Many of you will get to the point when you're happier now and they'll notice changes in you. They'll notice even changes like, your Law of Attraction is changing for example. All of a sudden things that you weren't doing before seem to be rapidly changing now in your life and they'll notice that and then what will happen is, they'll start asking questions but up until that point, they hammer you to bits. That's what it feels like and we need to be humble enough to take it in the end.

Participant: When my sister writes to me she always asks me if I'm better now.

How many of you once you started connecting with some of these emotions inside of you that, let's face it, have been there for all of your life... how many of you now get these condescending comments given to you, like, "Are you better now? Are you still doing that? Are you still feeling that?" My mother says that to me quite often, although she's stopped recently, very recently doing that to me, she's saying, "How's your emotional processing going?" That's what she says now. What she said before was, "I don't see how this is helping you at all, I don't see..." Well of course you don't see because you don't see me. But the truth is they don't notice until you are well and truly on your way, and in fact many of you will not get to the place where you are relatively happy for some time after you start. Now the reason why that is, is because starting is the hardest. In starting what's happening is we're chipping away at all of our emotional blockages, and some of our emotional blockages are intense, like really huge, that we don't even notice, but they are really big emotional blockages within us. And what we need to do is allow ourselves to chip away, chip away at these emotional blockages and our emotional blockages are this castle that prevents us from being humble, prevent us from feeling all of our emotions as they occur.

Now as we're chipping away at this castle; we're really chipping away at my family's castle. Now families are not too impressed with that because they've spent years, generations in fact, developing that castle, whatever the castle is, and so when we start chipping away at it, it's like we're committing the worst crime possible against the family. And so that's why we get a lot of attack generally, and a lot of pressure to give it up. And the pressure always comes the most when you are potentially in the most doubt, which is always in the beginning of anything, isn't it? So if you start playing the piano and you've never played the piano before, and you start playing the piano, the first time you start playing you're like, "Ding, ding, ding," you know it's really quite basic, isn't it? And you're trying to read the music and know where the notes are on the piano keyboard. Now if someone comes along right then and there and says to you, "You know you're really useless at that, aren't you? You're always going to be useless at that. Don't you think that you should give it up now?" Now that's the worst possible time to say that isn't it? Because you've just had a fledgling desire that's just beginning. Then you get all this pressure and the emotional pressure is often so great and connects with certain emotions within us of unworthiness, or that I'm never going to be able to get it, or all of these other emotions that are within us. And so what happens then? We just give up then and there. That's what happens on the Divine Love Path for many as well.

So there's literally thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of people on Earth right at this moment who have received information about the Divine Love Path, but there's not thousands of people that are doing it. Why is that? Because many of them had that initial honeymoon period, you know the first four weeks where everything sounds really good. Remember that period? For many of you, do you remember that, that was way back then. Remember that? And then there's this period where we are chipping away at the emotional blockages coming up, remember to that cliff point, you know the point of jumping off into God reliance. Now that's a pretty stressful period; not only is it a stressful period, it's the time when my humility is going to be tested to the max, it's the time when my desire for truth is going to be tested to the max. Once I get over that period and fall into God Reliance, once I'm into that space, what happens then? What happens then is I start enjoying the process. So if you're not yet really enjoying the process, then that's telling you where you are in the process.

Now when we step into full humility, that's also the time when you'll step into really starting to enjoy the process, having a real strong Longing for Truth.

Quite often some people come up to talk to me and they say, "AJ I've got this particular problem, could you tell me a bit about it.' So I tell them a bit about it, many of this has happened to you and then their initial reaction is, "No I don't agree with that, that's not true, how dare he say that." Then I get usually over the next week a few emails from you, this has happened for many of you, a few emails, "I didn't agree with that that was wrong, I don't see how you can say that." And then I say a few things back or whatever. So can you see how initially it's very hard for us to just accept like a child what's being said to us, and then allow the emotion that get's triggered about what's been said about us to come up. Instead what we want to do most of the time is we want to fight the process.

6. The importance of humility for our progression

So today what we want to do is talk a lot more about is humility. It is the single most important quality aside from longing for God's Love and Truth; it is the single most important quality you will need on your own progression. So you know we can have all these fascinating conversations about spirits and how they interact with you, and we can even do some mediumship, and isn't it wonderful? We can even do all these different laws and some of the laws are really like quite fascinating to find out about, and we can discuss about all of those things. We can talk to all these different people about all these wonderful metaphysical things that occur, but to be frank, all of those things mean nothing compared to these three things. And humility is where you are blocking God. Here is where you're desiring God, firstly Her love and secondly Her truth, but the lack of humility is where we're blocking God. And it's that area that we have the most difficulty with.

7. Anger is a sign of a lack of humility

So let's focus on this Humility. So the first thing we need to remember about Humility is that it is a passionate desire and longing to feel and experience all of my own emotions. So what questions can I ask myself about that? Whenever I get an emotion triggered inside of me, what do I do with it? Do I firstly project it at somebody else? Do you know what I mean by that? So let's say something comes up in me, I get hurt by somebody, it could even be by me, you get hurt by me, you feel hurt by what I've said or done, what do I do with that? Well what I will do if I'm not humble, I will instantly get angry with the person, so that's a good indicator – how often am I angry? If I'm angry quite a lot then that's a good indicator that I'm yet to actually fully choose to be humble. Now, I'm not saying to not feel the anger because you do need to feel the anger, so please don't think that I'm saying if you're angry you're bad or naughty. What I'm saying is anger is an indication that I'm not being humble.

Now to be frank with you, anger with God is the biggest indication that you're not being humble. So you know those times when we have a good yelling session at God. You know we're sick of one of God's Laws, let's say the Law of Attraction and we just totally don't want that law at all. Why did he create that law? It's cruel, it's bad, it's this and it's that and we go on and on and on about it. What we're really doing is just yelling at God, we want God to change Her plans. And do you think God's going to do that? Well God hasn't for a long time, so I don't think God's going to and particularly for you; if She's got to change it for you that means She's got to change it for everybody, and that's not going to be very helpful for your long term development.

So a lot of times we have a lot of anger and rage so let's look at anger. Anger is annoyance, slight frustration, irritation, then it goes into anger, then it goes into rage, and then it goes into hatred. So what would you define hatred to be? For me hatred is when you desire to destroy something. So it could be a person or it could be a thing even, but that's hatred. So anger has this huge slice of emotions involved with it, but all of those emotions are indicating that we're not actually being humble in our relationship with God. So if you find yourself frequently getting upset or annoyed with others, then that's a very good indication that you are not being humble; you are not owning your own emotional feelings, your real core emotional feelings.

Now some of the core feelings are very difficult to feel aren't they? For instance, if you have been hurt when you're a little child and abused and you don't understand why you've been abused or hurt, then that's going to be a hard emotion to work your way through. There's also some emotions like, most of us have grown up in our family castle believing that the family loves us. Trust me; you will really see when someone loves you if you don't do what they want. Then you'll really see if they love you. And the majority of times what happens is they get angry with us when we don't do what they want. That's an indication that they don't love us by the way. You see a lot of times what we're doing is we're telling ourselves these messages about love that we want to believe so that we don't have to feel what it feels like to feel the opposite thing. And this is one of the things we do with the lack of humility. In other words, I don't want to feel that mum and dad didn't love me, so what I do is I construct this whole world where I believe they love me. If somebody says... and you hear it all the time... I was talking with Anna this morning and you actually said something to me in this interaction that we had, where you were trying to make me believe that Mary's brother was loving Mary even though he was in a rage with her, and the truth is he doesn't love her in that state.

We're told the family truth not God's Truth, we're told the family truth; the family truth is the family is always going to care for you, always going to love you, always going to stick by you as long as you tow the line. That's the family truth. God's Truth is, "I am going to stick by you," this is God speaking to you now, "I am going to stick by you no matter what you choose." That's God's Truth. "You can even choose to hate my guts," this is God's Truth, "but I will still love you." That's God's Truth. You might not feel my love in a state of hatred but God will still love you in that state, and does God get angry with you? Well most of us believe He does because all of our life we grew up with our family getting angry with me whenever I did anything that was outside of their boundaries and so I grow up feeling, from these two parents, that love is punishment, love is anger, love is rage, love is... I have all of these definitions of what love is inside of me and so I then attribute all of them to God. But all of those things are caused by me not being humble, because if I was humble I would go into my emotions. When you were three or four or five and you got a belting, in that moment did you feel love? Mum or dad is there saying, "The Bible says spare the rod, spoil the child," and so what do they do, they are smacking you and saying, "I don't really want to do this to you but God says I've got to." What are we just getting told? God's a punishing God who's going to inflict pain on you whenever you do anything wrong. This is why many of you are so afraid to progress, because you are so afraid of doing anything wrong. Because what happened when you were child whenever you did anything wrong, you got pain. So now you have, mistake equals pain. What am I going to finish up doing then? We don't want to make mistakes do we, because we know there's going to be pain so we do one of two things. One of the first things we do is we give up doing anything. So in other words we don't take any responsibility for anything in our life because if I get it wrong then somebody's going to punish me for it. Or I just go and do my own thing and blow the consequences, which is also not a very self loving thing to do because there are always consequences with God's Laws too.

So we finish up through this aspect of not feeling the truth. The truth of that particular example that I gave you, mum and dad were not loving me when they were punishing me or getting angry with me or in a rage with me, or any of those other states... and by the way every time you as a parent right now, if you're a parent now doing those things, you are not loving your child. That's one of the reasons why we get resistive with humility too. We recognise that what I'm crying about with my mum and dad I've done hundreds of times with my own child, and so we don't want to come face to face with the personal feelings about how we've damaged others. And so what we then do is maintain the fiction that what we're doing is loving, when it's actually not. Instead it would be better for us to face the fact that what I'm doing is not loving and what my mum and dad are doing is not loving and the generations before them, what they did was not loving. We've all got to grow up and start to be loving, that would be a more powerful thing to do, but we often don't do that.

So anger is a really good indication that we're really folding down and shutting down our connection with God. You see when we're humble we don't get into anger very much, if at all. When you're at-one with God you won't get into anger at all but before you at-one with God, if you get angry frequently, it means that you're still in a state of resistance. And instead of trying to punish yourself which is actually worse, it's going to make the situation worse, it's far better to talk to God about why you're so resistant. Now remember we said the other week that anger is always covering over fear? So there are some fears that you are not facing when you are in an angry state, and you need to start talking or looking at them. So for any of you who feel that you don't have fears, do you have anger? Well if you have anger that indicates that you have quite a lot of fears but you're just covering them over with anger.

Participant: Is it possible that there's another step to that where some people feel so unworthy that they can't even get to the anger stage?

Yes that is a potential issue in that a lot of us actually don't allow anger because we feel so unworthy to even have anger and I've personally been in that state. Where I've had so much unworthiness that when somebody treats me badly and I just think that's what I deserve so I don't even get angry, but that's still a self delusion and it's also a denial of the truth inside of yourself. So what I had to do myself is go into the pain of getting treated in that way and allow myself to feel the hurt. Many times what we do is if someone treats us badly, we justify their treatment of us. "They treated me badly because I did the wrong thing, or they treated me badly because I confronted them with Truth," or, "They treated me badly because of whatever," and as soon as we do that we are actually getting out of the emotion that we feel, which is the hurt emotion inside of ourselves.

8. Judgement is a lack of humility

Participant: I'm just thinking of judgement, of being judgemental, and wondering if being judgemental is in a sense a projection and avoidance because of the feelings we have when we're humble? Or it's a scapegoat; it's in effect a projection outwards, the opposite of humility?

It is the opposite of humility but we have to define judgement in its proper term as well because a lot of people say that judgement is one thing when... A lot of people say that telling the truth to somebody is a judgement for example, that's not, actually that's an act of love, that's not a judgement. Judgement is, and we talk about this later in the outline, judgement is an emotion that's projected at a person that they are lower than ourselves, or an emotion projected at ourselves that we are lower than someone else. So, we can be self judgemental or we can be judgemental of others and both of those are avoidances of really, really deep emotional pain in both cases.

Participant: And both of those can exist in the same person?

At the same time on different subjects or even on the same subjects. Yes, dead right. And in fact many times we judge others as lower than us when in reality we have exactly that emotion within ourselves. Have many of you seen the movie American Beauty? Do you remember the Kevin Spacey character, I forget his name now in the movie, remember he was working out and his next door neighbour was a male who had homophobic tendencies. And the whole sequence of events that occurred through the movie was actually about that man's judgement of his own condition then being projected on others. And that's what happens with judgement a lot.

But judgement is certainly a lack of humility. In fact I'll be giving a four hour talk on judgement coming up in the future because it is such a terrible emotion to actually dump on other people, and it's also a terrible emotion to dump on yourself. It actually doubles up all of your own personal processing, so it actually makes every single personal emotion that you are going to need to work twice as hard, but it also does the same when you do it to others; it actually creates more of a burden or baggage on the other person about them dealing with their emotion. So for instance if you come up and say to me, and quite a number of you by the way have come up and said this, "When I was a bit younger I aborted a child." And you've heard I've said in one of these sessions that actually doing that is an act of murder. Now that's not a judgement by my saying that, it's just a statement of truth. So what a lot of people do, they come up to me and say that and then are surprised that I give them a hug and then ask them to deal with what was the emotion. What was the emotion that caused you to do that? Most people are actually expecting that the statement of truth will then result in a judgement that the person is lesser. And this is something we've got to stop doing inside of ourselves, and when we have become humble we will stop doing this.

Often what we do is we, inside of ourselves, take a statement of truth and because of our own suppression of our own emotions, we take that statement of truth as if it's a judgement of ourselves. Now many of you have done that when you first met me about lots of different subjects that I've brought up, and you don't need to do that. You see truth is just truth, judgements are to do with now putting yourself or another person as lower than you, and that's actually an untruth. So you can say the truth of what happened in your life. You can say, "When I was young I was really promiscuous, I actually took a lot of drugs and I was a prostitute for a while and then I must have probably had sex with a thousand people. I don't know and I don't even know how many people." Now for most people if somebody said that to them there would be judgements starting to come from them. But they're just stating the truth and there are just emotions in all of that, and they're just as loved by God as you are, even if you hadn't done any of those things. So why do we judge it? We judge it because of all sorts of emotional things going on within ourselves and that's what we need to do, if we're humble, we won't get into judgement.

Participant: If we judge the actions rather than the person, is that any much better?

No it's no better really. We can state the truth about the actions. So let's state the truth; if I get angry with you and I start yelling at you, am I being loving to you? So you can say to me, "AJ you are not being loving now." That's the Truth. But if you went down one step further and said, "You're lesser than me," or you've had a projection of an emotion saying, "Ah, boy, look at him he's angry, isn't he an idiot?" that kind of thing coming from you, then straight away you are now in judgement of me and that means that you've just committed a sin, if you like or a disharmonious action, an action disharmonious with love by being in judgement of me. So it's really important to see that the judgement is actually an emotion towards the person, it's not just a statement of truth. So we're allowed to state the truth and in fact God desires for us to always state truth all the time. Now you notice you get into a lot of trouble when you start doing that but it's a very important place to be in, to always state the truth.

9. Giving and receiving truth

Participant: I'm finding that when you do state the truth, even when you are trying not to project judgement, people are feeling judged by what you're saying.

Very much so and that's one of the reasons why we stop saying the truth. But as soon as we stop saying the truth, we actually close down our throat chakra and we'll start causing all sorts of physical harm to our own bodies. The way God made your body even was that it must say truth. When it gets shut down either by your own choice or by somebody else's actions and then you're responding to those actions, when it gets shut down, your own body enters a state of harm towards itself. When you shut down truth.

But you're right; when you say truth to people most people take it as a judgement. Why is that? Because they have their emotional filter on. Their emotional filter is... you might say to me, "Ah you're angry," and I might say, "I'm not angry, I'm not angry." I've got my emotional filter on, in that I'm already denying some stuff within me and I want to stop you from exposing my emotional truth in that state. And all I'm doing is projecting back at you the anger that you're saying that I don't have. You're saying I have and I'm saying I don't have. And in most cases what's happening is that we often, when we say truth, get a projection back because the person has entered a state of judgement themselves of that truth, and this is something that happens very frequently and it's something by the way, if you want to live in truth, which remember was the second important thing that we have to do in relationship with God. If we want to live in Truth, we're going to have to weather that storm initially.

Participant: So even when you know a person is feeling judged and you are still sharing that truth with them and saying, "No this is how it really is," we're not actually being unloving by stating that truth, even though they feel you don't love them very much at that very moment?

Exactly, you are actually being the most loving you can be to them compared to before.

Participant: Is there anything you can do or say that will alleviate their feeling of being judged?

Yes you can remind them that you love them even though you are stating this truth, and of course if depends a lot on your feelings and emotions coming from you. So if you're saying a truth to a person and you're really saying it just to make them feel terrible about themselves, are you judging them then? Of course you are. If your purpose is to make the other person feel bad, or put them down, or be condescending to them or any of those purposes, then you are actually out of harmony with love now and they are going to feel that. But if you have a feeling of love coming towards the person, you can say then, in truth, "I love you but this is an issue, this is an issue for you, and to be frank with you, I would love you to do the same with me when you notice an issue with me." Do you know what I mean? Exactly the same thing. Be truthful. And so once you enter that and also continue to treat the person in a loving manner, then of course things change over time, but initially most people will respond negatively to truth because they believe they are being judged.

Participant: What about, is there a truth you can get away with not telling people...?

This is a common question, Brian.

Participant: Like if it's not going to hurt them but is that still harmonious with love.

Not telling the truth always hurts somebody. So the way God designed Her Universe was that when you don't tell the truth it's always going to hurt somebody. But it hurts them a long time into the future. When we don't tell the truth, we're actually harming every single person around us. I'm not just saying telling the truth either by the way. I'm saying when you are not truthful about your emotions with the person; you are actually harming them too.

Participant: So even if you think it could be damaging towards you.

Well that's the reason why we avoid telling the truth, and this is the emotion we have within ourselves about truth. We avoid telling truth because we are afraid of what the person will do to us about that truth.

Participant: So the comment in the Bible, "Don't cast pearls amongst swine," is that something you said, and if it was what is that about?

Certainly it was something I said. What I was talking about there was a whole different aspect and that is, let's say you come up and ask me for a truth and your desire at that particular time is that you want to know the truth, then of course it would be right for me to say the truth to you from that perspective. But if you went away and you were then really angry about that and you got upset about it and you projected all this rage at me about it, and you did all those things with that truth. Do you think the next time you come up and ask me for some more truth that you're really in a ready place to receive the truth? So if you've gone ahead and just projected huge amounts of rage at me for receiving the truth the first time and you're still in that state and you still haven't done anything about that, and you haven't been repentant in your actions towards me, in other words sorry that you did that with me. Then why would I then give you the truth the second time?

Participant: So in effect why would you spend the time?

Well I'm not now being loving to myself if I do that. So I will always speak the truth unless it's a situation where speaking it would actually be unloving to myself. Now you've got to be careful here because when I say speaking about being unloving to myself, I mean obviously speaking the truth is always correct, but in this case what I would say instead is, I would say to you, "No, you do not to want to know the truth about this particular subject, you need to know the truth about repentance." Because I'm still speaking the truth, but not the truth that you want to necessarily hear. So can I illustrate that more perhaps, because I can feel a bit of that confusion?

Emotions transactions between a truth giver and truth seeker

So here's a person, this person here, we've got two people, this person here is the truth seeker shall we say, the truth seeker and this person here is, let's say, the truth giver. So the truth seeker comes up to the truth giver and asks for some truth. So the truth giver, because the truth seeker wants to know this truth, tells them the truth. Now this is an emotional transaction by the way, it is not an intellectual one. So many of you get told truth even when you haven't asked for it yet, and that's because your soul is already asking for it; this is all soul based transaction. So the truth seeker has a longing for truth, and the truth giver comes along and tells him some truth. If the truth seeker then gets into an uproar about the truth they've just received, what are they doing with the truth they've just received?

Participant: They're not accepting it?

Not just not accepting, what else are they doing?

Participant: They're going into denial of what they're really feeling about their own emotions.

Yes, what else? They're judging the truth as wrong as bad, right? Now they're actually in a state of rejecting truth now.

When you get into a state of anger you are now rejecting truth, and the projection will be at the truth giver, "I'm angry with the truth giver because of what he/she said." Now when this person is in a state of rejecting truth, they then often go through weeks and weeks of doing this and doing that, going through different emotions sometimes, and then they usually get into a state of intellectual denial that they are now in that state of anger. Then they come back wanting to know some more truth. Now in that state what's coming from their emotions? They are still in a state of rejecting truth. They are still using their freewill; remember the soul is about free will, they're using their freewill to deny truth. Now in that state if you give them more truth, all they are going to do is give you more anger.

If the truth receiver is angry they are using their free will to reject truth

Participant: So also it's unloving to tell the truth to someone who doesn't want it as well. Is that part of the meaning of that?

Yes well this is part of it. If the person is rejecting the truth already but then saying to you I want to know more truth, but their actions and emotions are that they in a state of anger about the previous truth that they've been delivered, then they no longer want to hear truth anymore. If I love them I will honour their free will to not hear truth, and point out to them what they are doing instead. So some of you have had that happen in interactions with me where you have come up to me and asked me for something and I said, "Actually you don't want to know," so you say, "Yes I do" and I say, "No you don't." "Yes I do, yes I do." "No you don't, you don't want to know." Because if you knew... when you did know in the past, you got angry when something was told to you, you got angry so therefore you don't want to know. That's your free will really.

You see a lot of times we go up to ask a person a question and then, do you know what we really want from them? We really want some commiseration and consolation, so that's what we really want. Yes you're doing fine, isn't it wonderful. You don't want to hear, "No I'm sorry I don't agree that you're doing fine," you don't want to hear that most of the time.

So, most of the time, our desire is actually not even humble. So we say we have a desire for truth, but in reality all we've got is a desire to feel good and we want the other person to tell us, "Yeah I feel good," from their comment. Now a person who's living in truth won't do that with you. When you want them to tell you that you're good, they will actually resist telling you even if they think that you're good, because that would be just feeding your emotional error.

Now when I said, "Casting pearls before swine," what I was talking about was feeding a person's emotional addiction, and you would never do that if you loved them. And you'll never tell a person more truth when they've just got angry with you for the previous bit of truth that you've given them. And also what would happen with the Pharisees is they would come up and ask me a question, but they'd ask the question because they wanted to catch me out all the time. So what's the motive for them asking questions? Isn't it an unloving motive? They have a motive of trying to cause harm to the person that they're attacking. So quite often the truth seeker is not actually a truth seeker in reality but often a pseudo truth seeker, a "truth seeker" in quotation marks, I would put them. In other words what they are often doing is they come up to you under the guise of seeking truth, but in reality they have the desire to put you down or treat you condescendingly or be belittling to you, or whatever. Now a person who's doing that is not seeking truth and that would also be like casting pearls before swine. You would have to actually point out to them what they're doing, which of course they're probably going to resist.

So in the first century I would often say, "I will answer your question as long as you answer first one of my questions." One time I remember they came up to ask me about some questions about my personal life and I told them I would answer their questions as long as they answered my question. My question was, "How was it that King David called me his Lord," which is a Bible verse that they knew. They couldn't answer it one way without getting trapped and they couldn't answer it another way without getting trapped so in the end they said, "We don't know," and I said, "Well I don't know the answer to your questions either," and walked off. Now, they knew what I was saying; you understand everything that was going on was at a soul level. They knew what I was saying to them. I was saying, "Actually, you've just done all of that with the wrong motive and I am saying to you I am not going to engage with you in that wrong motive."

10. Friendship

Participant: AJ this is a really interesting point for a lot of people here, because we're in a position to be given this truth and we're on this path. But I would think that I would probably speak for a lot of people here in as much as we all have friends and family who don't want to be on this path, and you know that I'm pretty game in putting it to people and I do frequently, and I get a lot of knock backs, but that's fine. I still have those people as friends and I accept that they don't want to know that truth. So I have friends that tell me stuff like you have just talked about, how they've had abortions and they've been prostitutes and all this. I recently had this experience and I said to this person, "How do you feel about that? Do you feel that's okay?" And she said, "Yes that's fine. I'm perfectly fine with that." So I feel that as a friend I want to keep her as a friend, I don't feel that... I'm speaking for other people here... I feel that it's okay to have my friend and feel compassion that she feels that way without judging her for that. Is that..?

Yeah, but there's a part of that that you're skipping over and that is: Why don't you want to say what's God's Truth is about the issue?

Participant: She's clearly told me in the past that she doesn't want to know.

Okay, so how do you feel about getting shut down when speaking about God's Truth?

Participant: Well, I feel that I'm not ready to wipe out all my friends who are not on this path...

I never said to you to wipe out your friends, but it's interesting where you are going with your answer.

Participant: Yeah I did, I really want to put this out there because I just want to ask it.

Can you feel yourself wheedling yourself out Carol?

Participant: That's alright, go for it.

Go for it... what's going on inside when I ask that question?

Participant: I guess it's a feeling that in the past I've had a lot of religious people trying to force their religions onto me and I think we've all probably felt this, I felt it anyway and at the time I sort of thought, I don't want to hear this. I feel that I really love this path and it makes so much sense to me but it's the path I want to walk on. And I put it to my friends and when they tell me, "No it's a load of crap and you're in a cult." And now they're starting to say, "Well it's obviously working for you so it's okay. We'll let you be in it now." They're good people too.

I'm not saying they're not, by the way.

Participant: Yeah, I know you're not. I'm just saying that I think a lot of us are in a position where we have good people as friends who are saying that to us, that don't want to hear the truth and how you feel...

You see you have to be very careful Carol about your definition of a friend for a start, and this is something that many of us don't want to acknowledge. Is a person being a friend to you when they tell you that they don't like what you are doing and they don't allow you to say what you feel? In particular if they don't allow you to say what you feel. So in other words if I've got to modify myself to be in your company, then what am I actually doing? Can you see that I'm being unloving to myself? Now as soon as I do that I'm going to harm my own relationship with God, in other words I'm never going to become at-one with God in that state.

So remember I said at the start of this that your relationship with God needs to be the most important thing you'll ever do? Now when your relationship with God is the most important thing you'll ever do, I will want firstly to never harm or never do anything myself that's going to harm my relationship with God. And one of the things that will harm your relationship with God is when you deny yourself and your own emotions; that always harms your relationship with God. Now if a "friend" is asking you, and I'll put a friend in quotation marks, is asking you to deny yourself when you're with that "friend". Are they being loving to you in that particular situation? My answer is no, your answer is yes they could be. My answer is no.

Participant: I don't think my friends ask me to be any different when I'm in their company. What I'm saying...

But you are different when you are in their company. You talk about what that friend wants you to talk about and you stay away from the subjects that you would like to talk about, but that friend won't allow you to talk about without getting upset with you, or rejecting you, and that is an emotion inside of yourself. I agree that you need to work your way through the emotions because in the end what will happen is you will not enter or engage in friendships that cause you to have to do that, because you can't be unloving to yourself and keep your connection with God. So in the end you will not compromise yourself and what you're being asked to do by your friends without you being really aware of it. You're being asked to compromise yourself when you're in their company. Now a good friend will not do that to you. You don't ask them to compromise themselves when they are in your company do you? Like they are still allowed to be a prostitute in your company aren't they? They are still allowed to be a drunkard in your company, they are still allowed to drink in your company, and they are still allowed to smoke in your company perhaps. Although smoking is a little different when they are blowing it in your face and there's a love issue there for yourself. But can you see you don't want to change them, you don't want to stop them from feeling their emotions and it would be an unloving act to stop them from feeling their emotions, but why do you then engage with friends who want to stop you from feeling yours?

Participant: But if a friend tells you something about themselves, not asking you for the truth of what you think... this friend didn't ask me to tell her, she was just telling me a story. I had to really stay out of judgement, I felt I was trying to stay out of judgement on that and say to her...

If you love them you will stay out of judgement, Carol. I'm not talking about judgement, I'm talking about there's a burning desire in your heart to say what the truth is about the issue; God's Truth, not your own. And you're not responding to it because you are afraid of what's going to happen to the relationship if you do. So it's a fear that you have and any fear is going to prevent your at-onement with God.

Participant: So where does that sit with throwing pearls in front of swine... because you know they don't want to hear it?

If that person doesn't want to hear it and I've told you they don't want to hear it, then what you do is an act of love for yourself. Why do you remain in the company of people who are shutting you down emotionally? The only answer is that you don't love yourself enough yet.

Participant: Okay.

That's the only reason why you would stay in their company. So when I'm saying, "Don't throw your pearls before swine," what I'm saying is love yourself enough to be yourself with everyone around you all the time, and if they're unhappy with that, don't spend time in their company. If you're spending time in their company when they shut you down, you're not being loving to yourself.

And remember on this path it's not just about love of God. Because what God's teaching you to do as you progress towards God is you're coming to love yourself as well. And you see most of us don't want to give up the areas or the addictions we have about how we define love of self. Most of the time most of feel that we're loving to ourselves when everybody else wants to be loving to us. In other words as long as I've got fifty friends all being loving to me it must mean I'm a good person, it must mean I'm a happy person, it must mean I'm a... whatever we define as 'good' in that interaction. The truth is that you can actually have a relationship with God and be completely happy, and not need a single other person in your entire life. Now in that state you will have hundreds of people in your life ironically because you're actually staying in truth, and you're staying in love, and you're staying in humility and that will actually draw people into your life. But initially you may have to go through losing current friends and gaining new friends in that process.

Now I'm not saying to reject your friends. What I'm saying is to be very sensitive about when they're rejecting you and causing you to reject yourself, and work through the emotions inside of you that cause you to go along with that treatment. And that's a whole group of emotions about love of self that we need to allow ourselves to focus on.

Participant: I had a recent experience like that with a good friend who I have been really open to what he has been saying over the years. He does a lot of this access work and he's really open to what I talk to him about, like you and things like that, but I just find he keeps asking questions all the time. He wants to know more even though he doesn't want to go down the path, he's still... it's still coming from within him...

Yeah and he's still not judging you for doing it. He's not trying to stop you from doing it and he's not trying to stop your emotions when you're interacting with him. So that's a lovely friendship; you both can be on totally separate paths and be in a really good friendship in that state. I have many friends in the spirit world in particular that are in that state with me, where they are in the sixth sphere state or whatever and we're friends. But they allow me to experience my emotions, they just don't feel it's for them, and that's fine. It's when they project at you to stop feeling your emotions in their company, now you're not being loving to yourself by remaining in their company. Can you see that? And unloving to you might be from condescending right the way through to in a rage, remember? If I'm condescending towards your emotion, am I loving you? No, whatever that emotion is, I'm not loving you if I'm condescending towards it. Now if I'm in a rage about you feeling that emotion in my company, or talking about one of your favourite subjects in my company, do you think I'm loving you then? No. Why would I be in a rage with you experiencing your desire for anything?

This is what happens a lot. We finish up compromising ourselves on the Divine Love Path so much that we never become at-one with God, and do you know what we're really doing? We're basically saying that our relationship with our friend is more important to ourselves then our relationship with God. That's really what we're saying. Or we're saying that our relationship with our friend is more important to ourselves then our relationship with myself. That's often what we're doing; we're sacrificing ourselves for those friendships.

Now, you can and do have the capacity to be friends with every single person on this planet even though they are on widely variant paths to you. However, you may not be able to do that and if you realise as soon as you start compromising yourself, you are no longer being a friend to yourself, you may not be able to enter into friendship or reactions with those people.

So there are many people at the moment who are very, very angry with me, personally angry with me and upset with me. I do not spend time with them and I just say, "You're very angry with me and I'm not loving to myself if I spend time with you in my personal life." I'm perfectly happy for those people to come along to these groups and many of them don't of course, because they are angry with me, but I'm perfectly happy for them to do that. And I think of them with love, when I feel about them I miss them, but I'm not going to compromise my love of myself to spend time with them when they are still being unloving towards myself. And that's something to bear in mind. So hopefully that sort of answered that question for you, Carol.

11. Fear of truth impedes humility

Participant: Hi, I'm afraid of the truth big time and actually...

I reckon join the club; it's called, "The Afraid of Truth Club."

Many people have a fear of receiving truth

Participant: But I actually push everybody away and I push all my emotions away to the point that I'm actually pushing God away. So when you say pray to God and I am really scared of the truth and I'm scared of you, how can He hear me if I'm not feeling my emotions?

That's right He can feel you but you won't feel Him if you're not feeling your emotions. God will still love you but you won't feel that love while you're shutting down emotionally. Let's look though at the issue of being scared of truth. This is a major impediment to humility.

If we allow ourselves to understand that when we're scared of truth, we're actually scared of love and we're scared of bliss, then we can start examining what's underneath it emotionally. So let's look at our beliefs about truth. What do you believe truth is? Why are you so scared of it in other words?

Participant: Why am I so scared of truth? Can I say I don't know?

You do know.

Participant: I don't know...

Let's start again...

Participant: It's pretty shitty...

Why is it shitty, what happens? What happens when you speak the truth, every time?

Participant: My whole body feels weak.

So you go into a state of fear, so what are you afraid of?

Participant: Exposing myself?

Why would you... just have a think about this for a moment. Why would you get to a point when you're shaking at truth? I've done this myself; many of you have done this. Why do we get to a point when we're shaking, you know you sit down and you know you've got to talk about the truth to a friend and you know that it's going to be a hard discussion, you know this right? And you can feel all this anxiety come up in your tummy and you start shaking, and you're breathing and it takes you weeks. You settle on it for weeks and you're still shaking after weeks. Then you go say the truth and you shake so much you can't say it... why would that have happened to you? What would have happened when you were young? Punishment, it has to be some kind of huge terror base, because it's terror that you are experiencing. You have a terror about the truth from your childhood. Now the first thing to do with any terror, about any matter, is to acknowledge that I'm terrified. So acknowledge that I am terrified of, in this case, speaking the truth.

For some people there is terror about speaking the truth

Now why would you be so terrified? It can only be because there was a lot of pain associated with telling the truth at some point in your childhood, or your parents' childhood for that matter, because it can be a multigenerational thing. Now the only way to actually bring this terror up out of you would be to actually tell the truth and experience bodily the terror while you're doing it. That's the way to deal with the emotion; to actually go ahead and tell the truth and actually feel the shaking and the trembling inside, and breathing. And start breathing diaphragmatically as you're doing it; that's the only way you can release these terrors, is actually to experience them. So allow yourself to do that. So tell the truth and then experience all of the terror that comes up as a result, and when you do that you'll actually find out what events caused you to feel so much terror, but you won't find out before then. You won't even be intellectually able to go back in your life and say, "What would it be? What would it be? What would it be?' For most of us we've got so much terror associated with feeling what it is that we won't have a memory of it at that point, and it's only when we allow ourselves to experience the terror and release some of it that a memory of what's it's about will come to us.

Participant: I've actually really gone out of my way to keep saying the truth now, and I'm really causing a lot of trouble.

And how are you finding it?

Participant: Oh I'm getting a lot of fear and I go into the shakes and I really get into it, but I keep having it every time...

Let's talk about your Law of Attraction with truth. The majority of you are still afraid of truth. The Law of Attraction means then that when you speak the truth something negative will happen to reinforce your fear of truth, and this is something we need to work our way through. Some of you have worked your way through that emotionally... where's Peter at the moment? There he is. Pete, you're not very afraid of truth, honestly? You often just go, "Bla bla bla" and what happens around people around Peter generally, they all have a tendency to listen or not listen, but it doesn't seem to bother Peter much either way. And a lot of you have heard out Divine Truth because of his desire, why is that? Because he's not that afraid of truth. He's afraid of other things but not afraid of truth.

Peter has other problems with different matters but not a problem so much with the truth. So he has definitely a problem of living in truth with everyone around him, that's a different matter. I'm talking about the Divine Truth, telling the Divine Truth. So the beauty of that means that whenever he tells the Divine Truth a lot of people listen, because his Law of Attraction is that he doesn't need to be triggered all the time about his fear with telling the truth. And you'll find that when you have that shift emotionally inside yourself, all of a sudden a lot of people start listening to you who weren't listening to you before. And it's because you've now dealt with the fear of truth inside of yourself.

I was talking before to Daniel. That's what happened to you about this coming up to Queensland thing, isn't it really? You've never told the Truth in your life, you were saying to me. And you're the same are you? You'll confirm that he's never told the Truth in his life. So what happened was that you just thought you had to tell the truth about why you came up didn't you?

Participant: Yes we were looking to come up to Buderim to look for a house and the people that we were staying with are over here now with us. We went into the house and looked around. And it all felt really good but I'd just watched a video on truth, one of your DVD's, and something just didn't feel right. I just had to say, "Look the reason we're really up here is that we want to come and see AJ," and Joyce, who we live with, grabbed her daughter's arm and screamed, "AJ, where?! When?" and they'd been living here for some time.

And you hadn't come to one of the sessions before had you?

Participant: No, and out of all the houses in Buderim... so that was my experience of telling the truth.

So you were compelled to tell the truth under that circumstance and you did. Then what happened was that now there's other people involved with hearing the truth and so forth, just from your desire to tell the truth.

Participant: Yeah, exactly.

That's a pretty good lesson to remember for a person who's never told the truth in their life, isn't it? So can you see the importance... quite often, we don't trust God very much in the end. Oftentimes when we're in such deep fear about truth, we're not trusting God at all, we're not trusting God's Laws at all. We don't believe that when we tell the truth, everything will eventually happen for the best. We don't believe that and because we don't believe that, we then don't tell the truth and of course all of our worst nightmares are realised generally as a result.

So, the key is to understand that when you bring your life into harmony with God's Laws, then all of God's Laws and universe will actually act for your benefit. As soon as you break one of God's Laws, now God's Laws are acting against you. Can you see the difference? Now I don't know about you but I'd rather have God's Laws with me and no one else with me, than God's Laws against me. That's something that eventually you will have a realisation about.

12. The importance of Divine Truth

Participant: Does that then mean that coming to know truth because we are in a state of injury is a gradual process as we release emotions?

Coming to know truth is always going to be a gradual state, but the decision to live in truth as you know it is like a realisation process. You'll go through a process of realising how important it is to God and to you, and to your relationship with God. Now once you go through that process of realising how important truth is, you'll start longing for truth in your life all of the time. So you know when you come up to me, many of you still come up to have a discussion with trepidation in your heart, if I can say it that way, because you're worried about what next instalment of truth you're going to get right? Now that is an indication that you're still not yet longing for truth, and the reason why is there are still some humility issues to work your way through. You see when we long for truth we have a strong desire to feel all of our emotions surrounding it. In fact that helps grow our humility, if you think about it. When I decide to actually keep truth away from me, to repel truth, the only reason why I would ever do that is because I'm afraid of something emotionally. And so what I need to do is, instead of being afraid emotionally, I need to look at the emotion. Why am I so afraid of truth? What is it in my childhood that caused me to be so afraid of truth? I need to experience that emotionally and release that from me because that is one of my barriers to God. I need to release that feeling of I can avoid the truth.

Now many of you have come up to Mary or myself over the past six months and asked us questions and been given an answer, and then you've gone ahead and avoided the truth. And many of you have done it because of friendships. Let's put you in a scenario. Let's say a friend of yours has done something unethical and you know about it, nobody else knows about it, why wouldn't you tell the truth? Maybe you're in an organisation where people are wondering who did it and all those kinds of things? Why wouldn't you tell the truth? The only reason why you wouldn't tell the truth is because you are afraid, and the only reason why you're afraid is because you'll be afraid of your friend's emotional response. So let's go even deeper. You're actually afraid of your response to your friend's emotional response. That's really what you're afraid of. So if I'm afraid of my own emotion, am I in a state of humility? No, because remember what humility was? It's a passionate desire to feel and experience all of my own emotion whether it's pleasurable or painful.

If I'm actually taking a step to avoid my emotion, I am not in a state of humility. And remember I said at the beginning of this discussion, that when I'm not humble that is the biggest impediment to my relationship with God. So what I'm really doing is I am using my free will to construct the block towards God. I am basically saying to God, "My relationship with you isn't that important. It's not as important as my relationship with Mary, it's not as important as my relationship with James." That's really what I'm saying. I'm saying that my relationship with Mary or James, or the people that I'm worried about upsetting, are more important than actually staying in this connection with God.

I'm now suggesting to you start considering flipping that over, flipping that over and saying, "Alright, I want my relationship with God to be the most important thing in my life and if that's the most important thing in my life, then every other relationship is going to fall second to that relationship I have with God." And that also is going to mean that I am going to be in the same state of truth with God at all times, which means feeling my emotions, my really truthful emotions, you know the warts and all emotions, with God at all times.

Now if I stay in that state, I will progress really rapidly. What causes us to stagnate on the Divine Love Path is always when we use our will to avoid humility, we use our will to avoid our emotions.

Participant: If I have an expectation that I'm going to be heard, or an expectation or an agenda of any kind, does that then dilute the Truth?

As soon as you have an expectation of being heard for example, basically that is an addiction and the addiction being satisfied is always an avoidance of an underlying emotional truth.

Participant: So then do you not speak the truth?

No if you have an addiction to being heard, always examine your own motives before you speak. So when you speak and you have an addiction to being heard and the person is not hearing you, the Law of Attraction will be that people won't hear you right? If you have an addiction to being heard, the Law of Attraction is going to be that people won't listen to you and then when you get upset with them for not listening to you, straight away I note, "Ah, I'm not being humble here, I'm not feeling this 'I'm unheard' emotion again which comes from some kind of childhood experience."

Participant: Okay, so then how do I find truth if I recognise I come majorly from a place of error? How do you find it?

Well you've already found it, Jen, so it's an interesting question that you ask! But remember it's always the three things we've mentioned. If you have a love for God first, more important than anything else, and you have a desire for God's Truth more important than your own truth and more important than any other relationship, and you have a desire to feel and experience all of your own emotions at any one time, you will always come to truth, always. Truth will be attracted to you; you'll be like a magnet for truth.

Now many of us become a magnet for truth and what do we do, we become so frightened of the whole process because there's so many emotions like... I have this emotion... then I have this realisation... "Argh, I didn't know I had that problem, and I didn't know I had this problem. Argh!" And before I know it I'm getting snowed under, what I feel is snowed under, with all this truth and then I start not being humble you see. Remember I said at the beginning about the soul; remember I said how does this soul get bigger? Here's the soul, how does it get bigger? By getting overwhelmed!

13. Being overwhelmed enables the soul to grow

The only way you are going to get bigger in your capacity to experience Divine Love and bigger in your capacity to experience your desires, is by this soul being overwhelmed emotionally with truth.

Our souls grow when we are overwhelmed

Now that's an interesting way to conceive things isn't it? You actually start to enjoy being overwhelmed emotionally, can you see that? You start going, "Wow this is so good. When I look at last week, or last month, or last year, wow I can cope with so much more now. I can actually cope with a million spirits projecting rage at me now without falling in a mess." About three years ago I could cope with one person projecting rage at me before falling into a mess because I had to release all of these different emotions about why that was the case. The feelings of hurt and all of that kind of stuff. So now the soul has expanded in its capacity, and also it's expanding in its capacity to experience love.

14. The power of growing in love

To give you an idea where you're headed because a lot of times we forget where we're headed; we had a very interesting experience, or I should say Mary had a very interesting experience this week. I hope you don't mind me mentioning it about the kangaroos? Mary started channelling spirits about four weeks ago or so, and because she's pretty open to it and obviously had prior experience, it's happened pretty rapidly. So the other day Mary was sitting out on our porch, we've got this little two bedroom shack, I suppose you'd call it in the middle of nowhere, and there's always kangaroos around us but they never come up generally close to us. There are a few that do come up relatively close, but they never sort of bound up really close to you. What they do is... you walk outside and they might be a few meters or ten meters away and depending on your emotions they'll usually leave. Anyway what happened this day was Mary decided to sit down and do some channelling. The instant she sat down she got a connection with some of her Celestial friends, one of the joeys and his mother bounded up to her, right up to her and stood on the concrete in front of her and looked at her. Mary got so shocked that she just got out of the connection, and as soon as she got out of the connection, they bounded off. Then Mary decided to get back into the connection with her spirit guides. As soon as she did that again, they bounded back up to her right in front of her again and there they stayed. It's pretty amazing isn't it?

Now why did they do that? They did that because the love of the Celestial Spirit is so strong that it's going to attract absolutely every living thing to it, and that's where you're headed. So you'll be able to walk out in the wild with all these afraid animals and they'll actually come up to you because you're in that state. That's the state of being at-one with God, that's what it's like. So it's not about taming them or anything like that, because these are wild animals that came up to Mary. They are in the wild, they are not tame, they've never been hand fed or anything like that, and so they're wild animals.

Now I've had the same experience with a bird. I know some of you have had simular experiences where you've been in the state of connecting with God, or you've been in a state of connecting with a Celestial spirit. This one lady I know had a willie wagtail come and just sat on her shoulder while she stayed in the connection and then as she lost the connection it went away.

Why that happens is because that's what love does in its full expression, it attracts everything. So many of us are so worried about where we're headed; "I'm going to lose all my friends, I'm going to lose my family, I'll lose this and I'll lose that," and that's because we're going through this transitional phase. That's all because in the end you'll gain a hundredfold family, friends and many other things too if you continue with firstly your relationship with God. Do you see what I meant when I said those words in the first century? You'll gain a hundredfold, you'll gain so many friends and so much family and everything you'll wonder what the hell you were worried about in the first place. You'll think, "Why was I worried about that one person who just couldn't accept me being myself?" You'll look back on it and think what a silly thing to do because you'll have understood what can be attracted to you.

15. Lacking faith impedes humility

You see the problem most of us have, the reason why we're not in the state of humility most of the time? It's because we have very little faith. We don't really think that what's being presented to us is going to happen in reality and so what we do is we go down this stage of then not wanting to... we reject the emotion of everything, because we feel inside of ourselves that it's not true. "You know, yeah, you know how AJ says that in two or three years I can be at-one with God, what a heap of crap, honestly. I've tried it, I did it for six months and after six months what happened? I was in such a mess emotionally, I was crying every day, I don't know what was going on, all of my friends said I was a weirdo now, and my family didn't want to speak to me anymore. Some of them wanted to commit me." And in the end this is where we go, "And in the end it's dangerous. It's just downright dangerous". And so now we start working our way through a lot of our fears, when I say working our way through I don't mean working our way through them, what we're doing is living in them. We start voicing all of our fears to our self and in the end; "I want nothing to do with him anymore." So that's where we go. Many of you have actually been in that state for a week or a day at least and then you get through that emotion, because in the end that's just an emotion too, of something we're avoiding, of something that we're not being humble about and we get through that.

16. Emotional processing in men and women

But many by the way don't. As yet, to be frank with you, there has not been one woman on the planet who's yet worked through her fear about truth. I have not yet met one. Now when I say one woman, there's about three men that I know of who have. I feel it's got something to do with what happens. Women have this huge capacity to experience emotion which is your advantage over a man, and that half of the soul has a huge advantage. But there's one down side to it, and that is when you're afraid you think your fear is real, that's the downside. Men have a lot of trouble getting into their emotion, you look at them and many of them do. But one of their advantages is that when they do get into their emotion they're generally not quite as afraid, because they have had less multi-generational fear to deal with.

You look at what happens. Who goes to war? The men, up until recently, even though they were afraid they still went. So what happened multigenerational men often have less emotional investment in fear, but the problem is they also have less emotional investment in emotions, so that's their limitation. So, many of the men are not allowing their emotions to flow very easily. Many of the women allow their emotions to flow very easily and they get in the swing of the Divine Truth, they progress but then they hit one of their major fear barriers, and that's when many women stop processing. We'll talk more about this tomorrow.

Now remember every time you do that, we're just not being humble. You see if we were humble, we'd have a passionate desire to experience every emotion within us, even if that emotion is terror. Even if it's terror!

Now of course many men are not being humble too because they're not experiencing their emotion. They're okay with getting through some of their terrors in many cases, but they're not experiencing their emotions, they're still shutting down that. And this is where you start understanding that each half of the soul has its own beautiful parts, and there is a certain beauty to masculinity and a certain beauty to femininity that, when the two of us work together, we can work through a lot of things emotionally.

So if we're in a partnership, a husband and wife or someone in a partnership, what the man can bring to the partnership is this feeling that even though he's afraid, he'll still do it, and that's a good thing for both the man and his partner. What the woman can bring to the partnership is; emotions are of utmost importance to deal with. "I'll show the man how to actually process my emotions at the causal level if he's having trouble with that." And that's what she can bring to the partnership.

The problem that we face is that one or both of us finish up living in the state, so the man finishes up living in his denial of emotion, so he goes into his intellect and starts shutting down his emotion quite a lot. Of course that makes the woman really upset generally because you want a nice connected man, and now what you've got is some kind of man that just lives in his intellect and sort of seems a bit like a zombie half the time. On the man's side, he can bring this really beautiful quality of not being afraid of his fear because that's what many women are doing, being very afraid of how afraid they are. They are afraid of their terror so they don't even let themselves experience it or when they get into it, they believe that it is real, and it is not real. Remember fear is "false expectations appearing real," so your fear isn't real and you need to be reminded of that. So let your fellow remind you, if you've got one. Remind you that fear is not a real thing to experience, you need to get under the fear, and you need to get further down than just staying in this fear place; that will help a lot.

Both genders, both males and females, have huge benefits to bring to the table of emotional processing and when you start seeing the benefits and start working with each other, you can help each other stay in the state of humility. And this is where many of you... and we haven't had a talk yet about soulmates. Oh by the way I want to ask the question, how many of you would like to have a talk about soulmates soon? Okay, we'll have a talk about soulmates soon. When I define soon, before the end of December is that soon enough? Earlier!

One thing we haven't talked about with soulmates and this is something that's really handy is that if you are not humble, when you meet your soulmate, you are going to have terrible strife in dealing with the emotions that arise, because your soulmate is going to trigger you. If you think you're getting triggered now, think again because when you meet your soulmate, you are going to get full on emotional processing happening. It will just ramp up if you're open. The problem for many of us is that we are not open to it and that's why some of us definitely prefer to remain single, because you get into that relationship and what happens? Everything starts happening and before you know it... and if you can stay humble to it, you can progress really rapidly. So that's one thing myself and Mary are really focussing on, on trying to stay humble to everything that comes up in the relationship, because it just opens both of us up and expands both of us each time.

16.1. Emotional processing in gay couples

Participant: I just got a bit triggered, AJ. The gay stuff, the sort of combination of the masculine and the feminine that you were talking about.

The same happens in a gay couple where one half of the gay couple will generally be less afraid of dealing with their terror than the other half, but one half will be better at emotionally processing than the other half. So it's the same principle and many times with a gay couple, this happens to a lesbian gay couple or a homosexual gay couple, many times both of them are more in tune emotionally and that's a part of the gay soul, or that one whole soul before it splits in two. So there's often a higher propensity towards dealing with emotion.

Participant: And one of the things then that seems to happen is that we trigger a lot of homophobia around the place because this stuff is going on.

Another reason why you trigger a lot of homophobia around the place is because you're not accepting God's morals; you understand what I mean by that?

Participant: No.

No? Well God's morality is that you would only have sexual liaisons with your soulmate.

Participant: Now I get it.

Now what often happens in the gay community, particularly the male gay community, is that sexual liaisons are very indiscriminate, and a lot of times without love at all, and you know that to be the case. Now as that happens, what's actually happening is you're breaking a lot of God's Laws and that brings a lot of pain to you and your relationship. So one of the major issues that particularly gay men face is this issue of actually understanding of how morality affects their happiness in relationships.

Participant: And that will have to do with AIDS then, won't it?

Of course a lot of the diseases that we see associated with all sorts of things in the world are due to the fact that we're not looking at the Law of Attraction that's occurring. And the Law of Attraction always indicates that something is wrong at the emotional suppression level. So AIDS is not a punishment of God upon the homosexual community. What AIDS is instead is an indication that the homosexual community generally, particularly the male homosexual community, is not getting one of the basic principles about love that causes suppression in their body, and then their body's immune system. So their immune system can't work anymore. So when they actually work through that issue emotionally then you'll find the AIDS problem will just disappear.

Participant: Yes it sure does.

So the key for many gay couples and particularly male gay couples is to deal with the issue of morals. But from the issue of emotions and humility, both halves usually have this male/female balance a lot more even. That means often a gay couple can progress very rapidly on the Divine Love Path and that's why the apostle John, for instance, his soul couple is gay and they were the second soul to enter the soul union state in history. So that's because of the specific qualities of the soul that often are associated with gay couples. Of the fourteen, two of the couples... of the seven souls that returned to Earth, two of those souls, so four people were gay couples. So two souls were gay souls.

This is God's demonstration if you like that every single person has the ability to reach at-onement no matter what their sexual orientation, but it requires that we actually look at all of the areas of our life and not just at the areas that we think we want to focus on. And one of the areas that is very difficult for many homosexual men to focus on is the area of promiscuity. And to be frank there are a lot of spirits involved in this process of promiscuity in the gay community.

17. Truth "police"

Participant: Yeah, I was going to start off by saying I have confusion around sharing your truth with others and then I realise that's not truthful; I actually have firm ideas about it.

So let me hear your firm ideas about it.

Participant: I just feel what right do we have to be the Truth police in a sense in another person's life? And that may not be what you're talking about, but there's an element of danger in what we're hearing I think.

Well, can I just address this emotionally for you? A lot of times our words tell us our own emotional injuries so let's look at the words "truth police". What does that feel like to you when it's repeated back to you?

Participant: It's in imposition of ... imposing...

So this police part is imposing on free will?

Participant: Yes and taking a higher position and not being humble actually.

Okay... condescending?

Participant: Yes, judgement. All that, yep!

Right, judgemental... I can't spell that, my other half of the soul got that bit.

Participant: I'm seeing that the two can't exist... don't belong together.

Exactly!

Participant: And I'm seeing that people can perceive that they have a moral obligation to impart truth upon others where they see falsehoods, for example somebody steals something, and "Okay I need to speak up about that." What right do I have to speak up about that when I've just gone out for dinner and eaten and spent enough money that could have fed and saved five peoples' lives that live not far away?

Now you're actually mentioning another injury that we all have many times. I notice myself doing something then I think, "Mmm". Then I notice somebody else doing something and that's bad. In other words a lot of us allow ourselves to get away with what we condemn in others and we don't understand that yes, a lot of times what we are doing ourselves is what we're creating, and what we're condemning in others. So I condemn a person who's a stealer but a lot of times I won't give him enough to eat. I'm actually helping create him so a lot of times this is what we're doing.

Now obviously if I'm acting in harmony with Love I won't do those things. The second thing is that this police idea comes from the fact that when we get truth given to us, a lot of times it's given to us through, and we receive it through, some filters and the filters are, "I'm getting attacked, I'm getting hurt, I'm being judged." and, frankly, a lot of times you are getting judged by that particular person or hurt by that particular person. But understand that that's not what God means, and that's not what I mean when I say you must tell the truth at all times. What I mean is that you won't have these feelings in you towards that person. So often you hear me say, "Do you want to hear the Truth?" to a person. Many of you hear that, and most people say, "Yes". And sometimes they actually mean, "No" but they say, "Yes" because they think that's the right thing to do. But often it's not, because it's not how they feel. But what we try to do is when I say, "Do you want to hear the truth?" "Yes." And then I'll say the truth so then when they get angry, I'll say, "Do you want to hear the truth?" "No." So next time, say, "No, I don't want to hear the truth." You're allowed to do that, but the problem we have here on the planet is that free will is often not respected in all sorts of transactions.

And in your own life, Kim, free will hasn't been respected. In other words I mean other people have, when you were little, imposed upon your free will so much that now there's this terrible feeling inside of you whenever free will has the potential of being harmed. And that's an emotion that causes you to then use the term "truth police".

I would never feel that I could ever police your life. You have complete free will and are totally able to do whatever you decide; that is God's gift to you. However, my relationship with God means that I have a desire to state the truth at all times, even if that means you are going to get angry with me. In other words, I love you enough for us to finish up not having a relationship because of your feelings towards me for me speaking the truth. Does everyone get that?

Let me state it a different way. If I love a person, I will tell them the truth no matter how they react to it. But I won't ever do it in a judgemental or condescending way, or by imposing on their free will. Now many of you I could come up to and tell you a long list of truths about your life. But have I done that? What have I done instead? Many of you have come up and asked me and so I tell you. Some of you have even said, "AJ, I want to know everything" and so I tell you everything. Jen, you've done that with me haven't you? And you've regretted it now, haven't you? But you did say that, and so I take you at your word and I tell you everything. Every reaction and every interaction, even if it's public or private, bang Jen get's the Truth from me because that's what she asked for, and so I give it to her. Now there are times when Jen has been angry with me and when you're angry with me what do I do? I just say, "No, Jen you've got to stop now and go away, because I don't want to spend time with you now because you're angry. You asked me to do this, I'm doing it but now you're angry with me and this is unloving." And Jen has gone away in a huff sometimes with me, sometimes for a month or so and then worked her way through the emotion of it and when you've worked your way through the emotion of it, Jen has always come back to me and said, "AJ I'm really sorry for that projection of anger," and often she's been crying and saying she's sorry and I give her a big hug and said, "No worries, Jen, let's go on to the next Truth." And the beauty of doing that is that gives you the capacity to actually get more truth in your life, but the majority of us don't want to do that, so the majority of us instead have this terrible viewpoint of truth.

So my suggestion is the truth always needs to be said but the motive in which you say it is very important. If your motive is to be condescending, judgemental or imposing on the other person's freewill, you're demanding them to change, then you are now not in harmony with love, and instead of speaking the truth you need to stop and start to focus on your own truth as to why you are not in harmony with love. When you get yourself back into harmony with love, now truth is so important to say, and it's always loving if it's delivered with a loving motive. In fact, truth is the only thing that is going to set everyone free, the only thing.

Now I've said this to you over and over and over again, and in the first century I said it over and over and over again. The truth is the only thing that is going to set you free. If you dislike the truth, how are you going to ever be free? If you view Truth negatively in any way, how are you ever going to be free? It's going to be very difficult isn't it? Can you see that?

So can we continue with the emotions? Kim, so you're right, can you see that the word police and the word truth don't really belong together?

Participant: Yes I can.

And can you see how, because you put them together there must be some emotions of a fear of these emotions from others? And that's what needs to be dealt with inside of yourself.

Participant: I will explore that.

So there's been many times in the past that people have harmed your free will, have been condescending towards you, been judgemental towards you and when you release those, what will happen is you'll get to think of truth just without the police on the end. You will think truth is so important and you will start saying it yourself, and practising it yourself completely and loving it when other people do it with you.

Participant: Yeah, okay but when we get the truth of our own failings, of our own denial, our own patheticness, and own... you know... come on... it's big, big stuff, who are we to possibly look at another person and say, "Mate I'm sorry but you're just missing..." That's what I'm talking about as well...

And again, you see you're coming from the point of view of having been judged, you see I don't look at it like that at all. If somebody comes to me with truth, I feel really blessed that they've told me those things.

Participant: So it's to do with your own intention... your own feelings...

It's to do with your own emotion about how truth has been used against you in the past. You see, if you're coming from a loving motive you don't want to use truth against a person, you're trying to help them with truth to get closer to God. So you're actually in a loving space with them with regards to truth.

In your past, and to be frank in most people's past, people have been harmed with truth by actually having an unloving motive. So in other words you tell a friend a secret and before you know it the whole world knows it and what did you feel? Embarrassed, and you didn't want to feel the emotion of embarrassment and then you got angry with your friend and all of these other things come up, but if you release this emotion of embarrassment within yourself, would you be afraid that anybody knew any Truth about you? You wouldn't would you? It doesn't worry me what truth you know about me. You can know I was a Jehovah Witness in the past, that's fine by me. You can use it against me if you want, you can actually think that of all these teachings that I'm teaching come from that religion if you want; you would be wrong of course. In fact you'd be so wrong. There are only probably three things that I've ever taught that have actually come from that religion that actually has as Truth in it, but you can believe differently if you want. You can judge that if you want. You can then call me a cult leader if you want, which is also a judgement as well. You can do all of those different things, but if I'm in a state where I'm willing to feel all of my emotions about that, it won't matter to me. I may get hurt and I'll feel my hurt. I may get attacked and people are getting angry with me because there's lots of people swearing about me on the internet, I'll feel hurt about that, but I won't attack in return because I'm in a state of humility.

(AJ Speaking to Mary) You were going to say what I've just said? I must have been channelling you for a moment then because goodness knows I'm not doing anything else! (Laughter)

18. Judgement and processing emotions

Participant: I went to the car and just had a huge breakthrough about fear of truth. It was when I was a kid, my mum accused me of stealing some money out of her purse which I never did, and so I went into a big fear about that. So do I have to come and see you about a release? Because I've been working on this...

Why do you have to come...? This is not about me and you. This is about you and God.

Participant: I know, but I haven't been able to do this and then I just go out to the car and in two minutes bang...

Well, yeah, a lot of you will notice that when you come and talk to me or see me or whatever, all of a sudden some emotions come up that you've been struggling with for a month or two; many of you have found that. Many of you find when you come up to me you can't even get your words out because you're crying already, and you've been struggling for a month before to cry. Now the reason why that is the case is really simple, I don't have any judgement about you feeling this emotion and you can feel that from me. So for those of you who are processing in that way and you come up and we talk and all of a sudden you're crying when you've been struggling, it's because you're feeling that I'm totally okay with you feeling how you're feeling, and totally okay with you and the emotion that you are experiencing, or need to experience. And I don't have any judgement of you for crying. In fact I'm here on the sidelines going, "Yeah, yeah, yeah! Go for it! Yeah, yeah, go for it!" when in fact most people are actually going, "What are you doing crying?" You think about your environment generally, what is your environment saying? "Get yourself together. How dare you do this? I want my food on my table at the right time," if you're a wife with a husband or whatever, "you can't cry like this all the time, there's something wrong with you. You need to go and get a pill or something." How many have you had that said to you? I've had that said to me before quite often. "You need to go and be put on medication because you're too emotional." And how many times when you were a child were you told you were too emotional? Yeah, a lot of women have had that history.

So we're shut down all the time. When you meet a person who isn't shut down towards their emotions, it feels like a relief inside of you. Quite often I have people come up and they tell me all their secrets and then say, "I've only just met you, why did I tell you all those things?" The reason why is because they can feel there's no judgement coming from me about those things, and I have a desire to know them; not some fictitious them, false masked them, but the real them. And so they feel drawn into the discussion. This will happen with you as you deal with these judgements as well. Judgements of truth and judgements of emotions and everything. You'll start noticing people coming up to you, if you haven't already noticed. People coming up to you wanting to talk to you about their feelings when before they wouldn't. Why do they do that? Because they can feel the change in you!

Humility: Part 2

I don't know about you, but I know my emotions affect these presentations a lot, and as I said to you earlier, the way I feel is very much like a hurt child type of emotion today. It's really got me in the guts as well, so I'm having lots of pain as I'm speaking with you through the unworthy type emotions. So that's having an effect on the presentation of course. But I'm also noticing that quite a lot of spirits with us are in the same state as I am, so unfortunately that's causing a little bit of the depression, if you like, of our session today. So what I think I will do is I will do this humility presentation another time in the future when I'm feeling buoyant, and hopefully that will mean I can present the material in a much more stronger fashion that it deserves.

19. Humility is having the desire to be taught by God

That all being said, I'd still like to say a bit more about humility. Humility is a lot like having the desire to be taught by God so can I just write that down: having a passionate desire to be taught by God.

One of the things I really love about getting taught by God is that when you get taught by God, God knows everything, and that's a real big advantage. You see when we get taught by others... so if you connect with a guru here on Earth what happens is that they have a limited amount of knowledge; a limited amount of soul-based truth that they can give you. But if you have a passionate desire to connect with God and get taught by God directly, then of course that opens up all of these possibilities for you. But most of the time we don't have a passionate desire to be taught by God because God sees us warts and all. And because God sees us warts and all, and we don't want to see our own warts, we then go down the track of feeling like we want to reject God's Truth, or reject getting taught by God. When we reject getting taught by God, then God's Laws start to teach us, and trust me, that's a much harder process. You see it's like, now the Law of Attraction is going to have to teach me what God can't teach me directly.

20. Humility is allowing ourselves to be overwhelmed

So if I'm open to be taught by God and I'm longing for Divine Truth and longing for Divine Love and I'm humble, I'm going to receive Divine Love into my soul. When I receive Divine Love into my soul it expands my soul and I automatically seem to understand things that I didn't understand before. That comes as a natural occurrence, but when I can't do that, I have to then get taught by God's Laws and God's Laws are uncompromising. This is why many of you feel that you have been knocked around by the Law of Attraction, for example, because God's Laws are really uncompromising. What happens is as soon as we notice what's going on in our lives generally, we start getting hammered from all of these quarters and we start getting quite worried about it. We start getting quite stressed out inside of ourselves about all of these different things that are coming at us. And then we start wanting to shut down the process, and many of you have experienced this where you've had a period of a week or so where you feel overwhelmed emotionally, and then you get so overwhelmed emotionally that you're starting to want to control the whelm, if there is such a word. You want to control it, so that you're not overwhelmed but you're just whelmed! I don't know if that's the word but anyway.

And so what happens is instead of allowing yourself to be overwhelmed emotionally, allowing all of your emotions to come in just be overwhelmed with those emotions and let the soul expand naturally. Which it does automatically when you're connecting with God. What we do then is we start to try to cut it down, cut it down and cut it down and get it back under manageable control. The problem with that is we get it back under manageable control, but now our soul's errors are radiating to the universe at the maximum amount which actually ramps up the Law of Attraction, which pulls in all of these events to tell us that were actually in denial of our emotions. And that's all caused by us not wanting to be taught by God, but rather wanting to control or shut down the process.

God knows how much you can cope with. You have no idea how much you can cope with. You can cope with a lot more than what you are currently coping with, trust me; you can. But often we don't believe it because what are we trying to do? Here's our soul and we're trying to keep our soul that big, because when it gets bigger... the only way it's going to get bigger is to be overwhelmed and we don't want to be overwhelmed.

Our soul is a certain size when we begin our progression

So what we try to do is squeeze it all back down to how it feels comfortable. We want to feel comfortable. Trust me, you've got to get used to being uncomfortable. A place of permanent progression is a place of always being uncomfortable, and you get comfortable with being uncomfortable. You'll notice the switch in you in time. You see at the moment what happens for many of us is that we are very uncomfortable being uncomfortable and so what happens is that we have a lot of resistance to the discomfort. Therefore we have a lot of resistance to being overwhelmed. Now in that state, because of that resistance and that control that we have over the process, now all of our denied stuff gets reflected to the universe like a radiator attracting all of this stuff, and our Law of Attraction seems to have ramped up. Of course it's ramped up, your soul progressed remember? Remember your soul started out this big and then you learned some Truth and when you learnt some Truth your soul expanded to this big. Well that means your Law of Attraction's going to expand too to that big. When you exercise your desires in harmony with love and truth, your Law of Attraction will be really, really powerful. When you exercise your desires in disharmony with love and truth your Law of Attraction is going to be really, really powerful, but in a negative event type of way to correct you. And that's because your soul has expanded too.

So what we want is this soul of ours to just keep getting bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger; that's what we want. We want it to get bigger and bigger and bigger and just keep growing. Infinitely, it's capable of growing infinitely.

The soul can expand to bigger and bigger as we grow in love

But most of the time, what we're trying to do... this is what's God's trying to do... God's trying to pour us full of more stuff, more stuff. "This person's really resistant. I think that I will just..." God doesn't do that, but what happens is we expand to a certain point and then we've now got ourselves back under control, that's what it feels like to us, "Ah I can breathe a sigh of relief, I'm now back under control." But in that state you are now stagnant and when you're stagnant your soul's not expanding, and therefore it's not changing and therefore it's not getting closer to God, to the place you want to be in the end.

But you see a lot of times what's we're doing is resisting the process of expansion, and one of the ways we do that is by resisting being taught by God. So then God's Laws all kick in and because we've already expanded in learning some of God's Laws, naturally our Law of Attraction is expanded as well. So whenever we go into denial of God's Laws, we seem to get a really quick response. Have you noticed that happening in your own life sometimes now? Where before something would go on and you didn't even notice it really, but now when you deny something, it gets right in your face. That's a result of your soul expanding, that's the beauty of it, if you think about it. It's a beautiful thing getting hammered when you're out of harmony with love. Can you see why? Because it's telling you straight away, "I'm not learning something about Love there." And isn't that why we're doing this, so that we can learn about love?

21. Humility is an ability to receive direct and indirect counsel

There's another aspect I'd like to talk to you about and that is receiving a direct and indirect counsel and criticism.

Now what is an indirect counsel or indirect help, indirect assistance? Well, indirect assistance is what you are receiving right now today. I am being indirect in the sense that I'm not singling out one of you and saying, "You've got this, this and this, and away we go." I'm not saying that. So what's happening in one of these sessions is indirect counsel or assistance, and many of you enjoy that because you come along to the group, you get some more knowledge of truth, and more knowledge of love, a lot of pennies drop and you start realising some things you didn't realise before. That's what attracts you and so you can feel that indirect counsel applies to yourself, and that's a beautiful thing when you do that.

But a lot of times you know what we do instead of that? We go, "Hmm, that doesn't apply to me. Hmm that doesn't apply to me either. There were only one or two things today that applied to me." When really sometimes the whole session did! But I think that only one or two things applied and that's because I am very, very resistive to indirect help or assistance. Now why would I be resistive to indirect help? The only reason why really is because I don't want to be humble enough to see that this applies to me. And so you know what God does then if you still think you've got a desire to progress? God starts giving you some direct counsel and criticism, or what you'd call assistance. And of course our reception of indirect and direct help is very much a determining factor in your progression.

You see if you have to have direct help before you progress, then you are actually going to progress much more slowly than if you allow yourself to receive indirect assistance. Can you see why? You see indirect assistance is really happening in your life every single moment and if you can actually say, "Ah that's me. That's me. Ah that's me again." And the key is not to be overwhelmed by the whole process; in the sense that I get into this fear-based state, but rather allow your soul to be overwhelmed by the emotional processing of it all. If I'm resistive to indirect counsel or indirect assistance, then already I am not being humble. You can see why can't you? Because I'm not actually applying what the Law of Attraction is bringing to me.

You see a lot of times we come along to a session like this the first time and we hear a lot of things, half the things we hear we don't agree with probably, and so we get into this state of going, "I don't know whether I really want to go back there again, you know, I couldn't agree with a lot of that stuff, a lot of it sounds like some Christian mumbo jumbo and a lot of it sounds like it's pretty out there and unreal. Particularly stuff about him being Jesus, now that's pretty out there!" And we go through the process of saying these things to ourselves when in reality we just received huge amounts of indirect truth and we become resistive to the indirect truth. And for many of us that's the time when we could easily go off on another course at any point. What's happening is we receive some indirect truth, didn't like what we heard and so we go off and try to get what we like to hear from somebody else. And if you're only getting what you like to hear, is your soul expanding? Not like it could be.

21.1. Differences between emotional progression on Earth and in the spirit world

You see if I'm only getting what I'd like to hear, then it's only if I like to hear a bit more that my soul expands. If I'm open to receiving everything that I can possibly receive from God, then what's going to happen is my soul is going to expand to its most elastic possible way that it can expand, and that's pretty rapid by the way. In the spirit world it's so rapid that within nine months a person can get from the first sphere of the spirit world to the Celestial spheres. Now why is it so rapid there and not rapid here? Because we're the same soul? There can only be one answer to that can't there? We are the same soul; it's got to be something to do with the environment doesn't it? If our soul is struggling for years and years here, and up in the spirit world we can progress to at-onement in nine months, then what's going on here? Something's going on here. What is that? We've got a physical body but that doesn't make any difference, our physical body is just a tool of the soul. What did you say, Alex?

Participant: Distractions.

What happens is we are constantly getting distracted from our soul here. We are constantly getting distracted from our true emotional condition. The big difference between here and the spirit world is that you cannot manufacture your condition. Let me illustrate that in another way. You cannot look different to how you really are in the spirit world. You see when you pass, the moment you pass one of the things you'll realise is this; I'll pass and all of a sudden I look in the mirror and see myself as I really am. Now that for many people is a terrible shock, because how they really are is with all of this ugly thing on their face, and these warts all over them and all this terrible scrunched up face and emaciated body; that's how many of them really look actually when they pass into the spirit world. There's a lovely message in the Judas Messages on the CD or on the download from the Divine Truth website, where Judas talked about what he looked like when he passed, and I recommend you read that actually.

Participant: If we process our emotions so much quicker in the spirit world, wouldn't we want to get there sooner?

Well what I'm actually saying to you is why are we not processing our emotions so much more quickly here? The truth is you can process your emotions just as quickly here as in the spirit world, but most of us don't because of the facade we are addicted to, that's why. So what happens is, as we become addicted to this facade, we are addicted to the false appearance of ourselves and so what happens when we pass, and many of the spirits who are here with us today have experienced this, when you pass you have a terrible shock. Now that shock opens yourself up to the potential of your own condition, you see. So many of you who think that it would be preferable for you to pass, when you pass you'll find a whole group of emotions about how shocking your appearance looks compared to what you thought it should look like. And that's what we need to deal with here. If we can deal with that here then we can progress just as quickly here as we can in the spirit world. Can you see that? That's all we need to do, all we need to do is deal with the fact that we are not seeing ourselves truthfully.

22. Humility is seeing ourselves as we truly are

Now the reason why direct and indirect counsel and criticism is so important is because that tells how we really are. But most of the time we ignore it. Don't we? "Whoops that went over my head, whoop that went over my head. That went over my head." And then we have all these reflections from our children. "Yeah, flipping children, I wish I never had them, you know, they create so much pain and turmoil in my life," not realising that it's my Law of Attraction. I'm getting shown the reflection of what is inside of me by my children, in particular. And then I go to work and I get the same reflection shown at me. I go to school, if I'm that age, and I get the same reflection. In my relationships with every single person I get a reflection, and most of the time we don't want to look in the mirror of that reflection. That's the issue we have. But in the spirit world, you're forced to look at it and that's the big difference. Can you see the big difference there? I'm not saying you're forced to look at it if you're a murderer or anything, what I'm saying when you have some knowledge of the spiritual things, which all of you have, when you have a knowledge and a desire to progress, which all of you have otherwise you wouldn't even be here. What happens is that you pass over with still that desire within you and that causes you to want to look at yourself. And then you look in the mirror and, "Whammo!" it's this terrible, terrible shock.

If we're prepared for that now on Earth and we can really see how we are right now on Earth this is never going to happen to us even when we pass into the spirit world. You'll go, "Yeah I knew about that, yeah I knew about that, that's no worries. And I know what to do and I know how to progress, I know how to work my way through these things." That gives you a lot of power, but if you're resistive and not being humble then what's going to happen is you're going to want this thing that you see in the mirror right now (on Earth) to be the truthful condition inside of yourself, and that's going to help you avoid a lot of emotions.

So part of being humble is seeing yourself truthfully. In the Bible there's a very good quote from me. It says, "A man needs to look at the mirror and see the person he really is. But if you go away and forget the person you are, then you will never progress." It doesn't actually say that part but it suggests that.

The problem that we face here on Earth is that we are often very distracted from the person we truly are and we like it, we are addicted to it, we are addicted to seeing a different image than what's really there. So when someone comes up and says, "Ah you projected sexually at that person". "What, no I never projected sexually, I'm married I love my wife I don't project sexually." Now in the spirit world you actually see this coloured cord going from you to that person you projected sexually at, so when they come up to you and say, "You projected sexually," you say, "Yeah I noticed that." But here on Earth you say, "No, no it never happened." And here on Earth you say, "You're very angry right now." "No I'm not, no I'm not." In the spirit world, you pass over, and there's this reddish orange arrow going over towards the person you're angry with and so what you say, if you know about it, is "there's that one as well".

You see here what we do is we're often telling ourselves lies about ourselves and that's such a dangerous thing to do. The worst person you can lie to is yourself. You can try to lie to God but God knows all the truth, so you can lie to God as much as you want and it's not going to be very damaging to God. But if you lie to yourself, that is going to create the most damage in your life. And that's where most people come to grief on their spiritual progression.

So we come down then to all this New Age stuff which a lot of it is about lying to yourself. Like, "Ah, my mum and dad really did love me, I know they abused me, my father sexually abused me and molested me, but I'm pretty sure he loved me. He was just mixed up and he was just this and that." That's not what you feel. You feel really hurt that you were sexually abused. You feel really... like you were raped, let's be honest about it. How does an adult woman feel when she's raped? Well what do you think a child would have felt being raped a hundred times? Can you see we've got to get real about the emotion rather than just justifying what's going on and saying it was okay, because of whatever reason that we want to justify to ourselves.

What about when your family is angry and upset with you? "Ah well that's just their stuff, they're still my family, I still love them." These are the things we tell ourselves. Get real, how do you feel when your family does these things to you? You feel hurt and sad and alone and all of these different things are getting triggered that you're not allowing yourself to experience. Humility, remember, is a desire to feel those emotions, wanting to feel them. When you feel them, you'll release them. When you release them, they'll no longer be carried around with you and you will get into a state of true forgiveness after that point, but only after that point. You see many of us are trying to manufacture it so that we don't have to feel the emotion. We've got to get away from that. In the spirit world you can't do that because in the spirit world you manufacture it and you've got all these spirits around you saying, "Yeah, yeah that's just fake. That's just fake." They can see you but on Earth we're so used to not being seen, we can cover over ourselves, how I truly am, can't I? I can cover it over and feel the cover over but when I do that what happens inside of me? I am actually covering over my own possibilities; I am actually stopping myself from being the person I truly could be; like covering over all of these other things.

You see when we accept all of the ugliness along with all of the beauty, that's when we progress the most rapidly. But when we just accept the beauty, we are going to get to a point of stagnation because we're not accepting the ugliness yet, and so we're just going to stop there. Stop there and stop there until we use our will, our free will, to actually move from that point and to start seeing ourselves as we truthfully are.

Now the reason why it's a bit easier for a spirit is because if you see only the beauty and you don't want to see any of the ugliness, you'll pass into the first sphere. You'll arrive in the spirit world in a lot more shocking condition than what you believed yourself to be, and then you'll know the ugliness is there. And if I'm aware of spiritual principles, I'll then want to work on that ugliness and when I work on that ugliness, obviously I'll progress and obviously part of my desire to work on the ugliness is, "Boy do I look ugly? I want to look better."

On Earth here, we judge everything through the material all the time and we're not seeing the feelings that are inside of us a lot of the time, we're not feeling them. So we're not feeling that rage and that hatred we have towards that person, and that rage we have towards that person. That terrible grief we have towards this, and that terrible feeling of sexual shame or something that we have towards that person. We're not seeing them all or even allowing them to be present, because we judge them or we condemn them in ourselves or whatever it is. So we don't allow ourselves to see the truth of ourselves. When we pass in the spirit world, we can now see the truth of ourselves.

Now I'm suggesting to you to not pass before you see. What I am suggesting is allow yourself to see what is truly there right now and it's going to be okay. God still loves you even though all those things are there. It's going to be okay for you to see them and when you see them you'll have some emotions to feel and I'm saying; be humble and feel them. Allow yourself to feel those emotions. Let yourself have those emotions come up in you.

22.1. Ways that we avoid seeing our true soul condition

But instead what we do here is we go, "No, no I don't want to do that." So we go into this thing that we often call denial and we often intellectually deny. We do things like we justify, "Yeah I'm angry but everyone's angry." Does that justify? You're basically justifying why you're not at-one with God and living in bliss. Is there any point to that really? Wouldn't it be better just to say, "Alright I want to see my anger because this is one of the emotions I have that is preventing my blissful feelings. I want to see it, I want to experience it, and I want to get underneath it. I want to get to that grief that's underneath it."

What about when we minimise?

"Yeah, I yelled at my children this morning but frankly a lot of people yell at their children and they deserved it." Well what did we just do? We just justified or minimised the fact that we were unloving. I've heard this so many times. We've talked about the meat issue quite a lot in terms of eating meat, and many of you don't like me talking about the subject and that's fine. But I'm going to talk about it some more because this is a free session and I'm up the front, and when you're up the front you can talk about something different. But what's actually happening is that for many of us we are justifying an unloving act. We're saying, "But my body needs this." What you're body needs an unloving act? How can you believe this, that your body need an unloving act in order to sustain itself? Of course it doesn't. Also, we go, "But everyone else is eating it, it's not bad for me, it's not bad for me at all." What? Something that's unloving is not bad for you? Of course it's bad for you. Do you see what I'm saying? Killing an animal is bad for you; it's an unloving act so it's bad for you. It doesn't matter how it's affecting your body, it's bad for your soul. So allow to see when you're doing unloving things.

22.2. The Law of Compensation, the Law of Repentance and the Law of Grace

Do you think yelling at your children is bad for you? Yes it is. You know there's going to be a Law of Compensation emotions associated with that. You're going to have to feel it at some point and do you know that the Law of Compensation emotion is about that? You're going to have to feel every bit of the emotion that your child felt when you got angry with your child, every one of them and if you child thirty years later is still feeling that emotion, you will still feel some of that, just from that one act. Is that worth that? Isn't it better not to justify and minimise it and just say, "I was unloving there," and if I'm saying, "I was unloving there," I can then say, "why was I unloving there? What caused me to yell at my child like that, what caused me to be condescending to my child or berate my child? What caused me? What emotion inside of me created this?" And let myself examine that emotion without judgement. I need to look at this emotion. I need to feel this emotion. I need to release this emotion from me so that it never happens again. So that I can be loving now.

Participant: AJ I've had five children and they're all grown up now so I know there's years and years and years of lots and lots of incidences which I can't possibly remember, let alone begin to guess at all the affects that I had on them, and you're saying that I will?

You will yes. It's a scary thought isn't it?

Participant: Well, no I'm willing to face that, I just didn't know how to get there.

Ah, and that's brought me to the important point. When you're willing to face that, now God can help you experience it. You see most of the time with our Law of Compensation emotions; we are not willing to face them. What we do instead is we deny that we were ever like that, "I did my best." That's one of our pet excuses isn't it? "I did my best, I only knew what I knew," another pet excuse, and so forth. So we go through these pet excuses as a parent, I've done the same; go through these pet excuses as a parent without being honest and truthful. What we need to do instead is say to ourselves, "No, no, no this isn't on anymore. There is no justification for my unloving treatment of another person, none. That person can actually even threaten to kill me, they can rape my wife, they can kill my children; there is still no good reason for me to be unloving towards them." Phew, that's a pretty big statement isn't it? But it's a statement of truth. There is still no reason for me to be unloving towards them. So if that's the case, and I'm willing to go through every emotion that these things bring up, now God can help me. And that's when the Law of Repentance kicks in, and that's what you call grace kicks in. Until that time, the Law of Compensation is what's present.

So what happens to many spirits, and we'll be having a talk later in the year about the Law of Compensation versus the Law of Repentance. What happens to many spirits is that they are so locked into not feeling sorry that they spend hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years going through every single little thing they did to harm another person. Now if you've harmed people and most of us have harmed quite a lot of people in our life if you think back on it, with some damaging things. Every single one of those instances is going to need to be felt, and your involvement in what that person did is also going to have to be felt as a result of what you did to them. Now that's like... can you feel that's a heavy burden?

Now when you're willing to feel that, and you can talk to God about that, now the Law of Grace kicks in, or the Law of Repentance kicks in, because I am humble and willing to experience the Law of Compensation in its complete degree. And I'll talk to God about that. Now the Law of Grace kicks in and removes from me the cause of why I did it by me being open to that experience. So whatever the childhood cause within me as to why I then damaged others gets removed, and so I will never damage another person in that same way again, once it's removed, ever again. I don't even have to try because the whole cause of what I did has been removed from me, and if the cause is removed then I don't have to try to do it right I automatically do it right from there on.

Participant: Do you still have to recall every incident, every situation?

You have to be willing to recall, there's a big difference between having to recall and willing to recall. Can you see? Most of us are not willing to recall and so therefore grace cannot help us; God cannot help us while we are unwilling. God can only help us while we are willing; this is why humility is such an important aspect. While I am willing to feel all of the emotional reasons as to what I created in my life, all the responsibility of what I've created damaging in other peoples' lives. What that does for me now is it opens up this pathway where God can reach in and actually alleviate the causal reason why I did it. And that's going to be an emotional experience; I'll cry for an hour, or two hours, three hours and then it will be gone and I will never do it again, and your Law of Attraction will change instantly from that place; you'll notice your Law of Attraction just change instantly after that, on that particular issue when you do that.

23. Humility is taking responsibility for the harm we have perpetrated towards others

And this is the key. Often what we do instead is we get into denial, we justify, we minimise and another thing. We often shift the blame, we like that, "Yeah it's your entire fault that I did that." So we shift the blame and these are all just things that we do to avoid our Law of Compensation emotions.

Now remember in the past when I've talked about emotions, I said that there's a whole group of causal emotions within us that need to be released. There's a causal emotion where other people have done damage to me, you remember that? Then there a whole group of emotions where I, because of these emotions within me, have done damage to others and they are what are called the Law of Compensation emotions. Now what I find is that most people have no trouble at all feeling the damage that other people have done to themselves, humble in that state, "Yes I can feel that James hurt me the other day," and I feel that, and then I get into that and have a good cry about it and eventually I release that and I've forgiven James in that state. And now I feel good, and now he feels that I am no longer projecting anger and rage at him. That is the way I can deal with that emotion so I deal with that and often I do deal with those kinds of emotions, many of us are like that.

But the whole group of emotions we are very resistive too is the group of emotions where we have harmed the other person. I am constantly hearing from people, "Ah, but it was your Law of Attraction." What?! You're going to justify to me being unloving to me because it is my Law of Attraction? How unloving is that?! What about, I've heard some people say, "You would have felt forgiveness from me so I didn't have to say it." What? Yes, I can feel you haven't repented yet. I can feel you haven't repented yet just by you saying that. Let's just say I did something to Nina and I was really sorry, I would actually feel impelled, would I not, to go and say to her I'm really sorry, wouldn't I? If I knew that I had done it, and I could feel it, wouldn't I say it? What would cause me to go, "No Nina will feel it, and she'll feel I'm sorry." Am I sorry? No, of course not! Otherwise I wouldn't have had that resistive emotion within me about the issue. Can you see if I were really repentant, I would be saying to Nina, I might even be crying when I'm saying to Nina, "I'm so sorry that I did that to you" can you see the difference?

One is a state of pure Humility, a pure feeling of wanting to feel all of your own causal emotions inside of yourself. The other is a state of saying... well it's still a state of anger really. Now I've had so many people say, "Ah you know you don't talk to me anymore." I say, "Yeah." "Why is that? I'm sorry for what I did in the past." I say, "No you're not and if I continue having a relationship with you, you're going to do is do it again, and I don't want that in my life. So what I've had to do is deal with the underlying emotion, get to a state of forgiveness of you which I've done so I no longer feel angry or upset or anything like that with you, but I'm not going to spend time with you while you are going to keep projecting anger at me." Can you see? Because if I love myself I wouldn't do that! Now often the other person then justifies their position and says, "Ah, but it was your Law of Attraction," or "I'm really sorry and you would have felt that." And they say it like that by the way. Of course I don't feel it because you're not really sorry, otherwise you would have come up and said how sorry you were and you'd have felt it.

Now let's reflect upon that with our family and our situations in our life. Now I've sat my two boys down, they were eleven and thirteen when I first had some worries about some different things and different problems that I was facing. The damage that I'd done and I said, and I was crying. I said to my boys over a period of about an hour that I was really sorry for all of the damage that I had done to their life, and that I recognised they would still probably be in their twenties even before they could release it. And the truth is that my eldest son is twenty five and he is still dealing with emotions that I created in him. And my younger son is twenty three and he is still dealing with emotions that I created within him. His Law of Attraction is still being governed by those emotions that I helped create in him. And I don't know about you, but I still feel fairly bad about that feeling; it's a terrible feeling to feel that you're so responsible for all these traumatic events in their life.

So what we need to do is get into stuff where we're willing to feel about that and when we're willing to feel it that's when God's Grace can come in and take away from us the reasons why we've done it. So lots and lots and lots of the reasons why I did what I did have now been taken from me. So my boys can see that, but that doesn't change the pain they're going through in their life unfortunately, and I have to take responsibility for what I've created. Now when you're willing to take responsibility for what you've created and willing to feel it, now God can help you. But God can't help you while you're unwilling because it's all about will, all about your free will.

So, my suggestion is to have a good look at the things that you feel ashamed of doing in the past, all the things you feel ashamed of. Write them all down because there are huge emotions in them. So you know when you had that sexual liaison with that person that you were ashamed of? And you remember when you had that... and you're a heterosexual... but you remember when you had that homosexual affair you're ashamed of? Remember when you harmed your children that way, when you belted them? Like in one case, for myself, I belted one of my sons seventeen times in a row. He stuck his knife in a power socket and each time he did it, I gave him a smack and then he looked at me and he stuck the knife in the power socket again, and I'd give him another smack. I did that seventeen times before he stopped. When I look back at it now, it feels terrible. No, it wasn't better actually; you see that's the thing that's the thing we tell ourselves, but it's not better than having him pass from sticking his thing in the power socket, because in that act he learnt from me a lot of damaging things about love. Whereas, if he'd just passed he would have learned none of those things.

You see we're so addicted to maintaining life on Earth, because of our fears about what it means to pass over into the spirit world, that we think that we can belt our children just to protect them. We justify unloving violence towards our own children, we justify it. That one statement, "It was better than him dying," is justification of my violence. The truth is there's no justification for violence, even if it means that somebody dies. Can you see that? It's better for my son to have passed, he would have passed instantly into his state, he was in the Summerland state. He would have had a wonderful time and he would not have learnt a lesson about love which was actually not about love at all, that he is now still undoing. He's undoing this for twenty two years. So for twenty two years that lesson has stuck with him. Now that's a terrible thing to have to come to terms with don't you think? And what was I doing? I was acting on my own fear. Now my fear of that has gone so I'd never do that again, because the cause has been taken out of me. But when I reflect upon the situation, it still troubles me that I was capable of so much physical violence towards a three year old child.

So it feels really upsetting, doesn't it, when you think of it that way? So let yourself feel about these things. Let yourself be humble to these emotions, allow these emotions to flow in you, let yourself see the damage that's been done and talk to God about this damage. Because when you talk to God about it, the process of forgiveness is something that you can work through with God then, and God's Love can help you through that entire process, and in the end clears away a lot of the causes of why you did it. So my cause, which is a fear of my son passing, is now being released; I'm not afraid of my children passing. I know they'll both pretty much enjoy the process. So that doesn't worry me at all now.

Participant: I just wanted to ask a question about forgiveness. In the past I've been in relationships that have been violent and when a person says that they're sorry and then they do the same thing again, you learn very quickly they're not sorry. Simon and I've had similar relationships that I've been in. He was on the phone with me sharing with me that he was asking for his ex-partner's forgiveness, and it triggered me immediately. I guess what I'm asking is, how do you forgive a person when you know they're not sorry?

I've already talked about that subject in one of the presentations called "Forgiveness, Repentance and Mercy". So my suggestion is have a complete listen to that presentation because there's a lot more than we can go into it now. But part of it is going to be being humble to the emotion that you feel within yourself of not wanting to forgive. So in other words feeling, firstly, the anger and the rage, then stepping down into the grief that was created in that relationship, and actually feeling the grief in that relationship. Once you get through that, you can get into a state of forgiveness, even if the other person is not sorry. However, you won't spend time with them probably until they are sorry. So you can forgive a person and be in a state of love towards them but no longer spend time with them because of the harm they will still bring to you.

Participant: AJ, with regards to having dealt with striking your son many times because of your fear that he might get electrocuted, what about going back beyond that; why was that physical violence perpetrated by you on him? Were you physically beaten by your dad?

Yeah.

Participant: So that was an acceptable discipline?

There were a number of beliefs that I had; one was that. The other was that in the Bible it says, "Spare the rod and spoil the child" and all of those kinds of justifications that I had. In the end I just wasn't connected to my soul, but I've had to feel the remorse of what I did.

Participant: And does that feeling go back another generation, like to feel it through completely; not only your feelings with regards to your son but also your own feelings as a child with regards to your dad? Or does that not go to that level?

Yes it does go to that level because my parents obviously justified the same justification that I had with my own children. So yes, it went to the level of having to feel what it felt like having violence perpetrated against myself, and then thinking in the end, or being told in the end, that it was loving. There were a lot of lessons of love if you like just in feeling it, going through the feelings of the process. And when you come out of that, you then arrive at a new state of love, where you understand that love is never going to be violent and there's no longer any justification for violence towards another person in any situation, including if they were violent, towards you. And so when you get into those states, you've released those emotions and that's what I've had to do in the case with my boys.

24. Humility is taking responsibility for all emotions within our souls

Participant: AJ, what's the line then between what am I responsible for in terms of my Law of Attraction, and being treated unlovingly?

Remember that the Law of Attraction is about your emotions. So they are all operating on your soul condition, so it's not just your emotions, it's your soul condition. So here's your soul condition, your soul condition is like this great big radiator that is radiating out to the universe that has reflected actions coming back to actually trigger your soul condition. But who created your soul condition? Isn't it your environment? If your environment was loving, what's the chances of your soul condition being unloving? Like, they're much, much less than most people here would think actually. In fact in the spirit world, when love is always given, so in the case of the first sphere situation if love is always given, it always results in positive things, never in a negative thing.

You see here we have so many distortions of love that we believe our childhoods were loving, when they really weren't, and we believe that love creates pain, and it doesn't; we have all these beliefs. But the truth is that if we're all in the state of love with our children, our children would never have an ounce of emotional damage to deal with. And that goes back for generations. So that applies to me and that applies to my father and my grandfather and so forth. However, there get's to be a time when you are responsible for the emotions inside of yourself. Not so much for their creation, but responsible for their release and this is where many of us have trouble, because we have so much anger about having to release emotions that other people created. You felt that right? How do you feel about having to release something that your mum and dad created? Often you would feel, "I would really like them to do that for me." And when I say that, most of the time it's, "and f them and f God and f everybody because I'm having to deal with this emotion within myself."

And this is the thing I've got to come to terms with; the fact is that this is why we can have a lot of humility but also have a lot of non judgement. In the end, you and I got damaged from our environment and they got damaged by their environment and the choices that they made. All of us got damaged by our environment at some point, but the emotion is now in me and the only person who can get it out of me is God and me. The only way God can get it out of me is if I'm willing to get it out of me. So in the end I have total control of this emotion leaving me. I'm the only person who has control.

So you know every single person who has ever harmed you can be so sorry and repentant and cry and do all the things they do and you know you can still retain the emotion inside of yourself. And so in the end you learn that actually the only person that can release this emotion, or the person who has control of the release of this emotion is myself.

Now on the Natural Love Path I have to release the emotion all by myself. I have to get to a point where I no longer remember the things that I've done, or remember the things that were done to me in an emotional way. Now that can take hundreds of thousands of years. You imagine being a person who's done a lot of damage, someone like Stalin, who they suspect, and this is only suspicion, killed over 40 million Russians. They know for certain he killed over eight million Russians through his actions. Now you just think about that. How many lives were damaged in that? Can you imagine having to work through the Law of Compensation of that without God? It's just horrific to think of. But now if we involve God in the process, it can be a much simpler task. But I have to be willing, and so Stalin would have to be willing to actually go through the emotion of all the damage he did.

Now you talk to some of the spirits in the spirit world about this. You remember Caesar... you've heard of Caesar? I'm not talking about Jules Caesar here. Caesar, it just makes me laugh sometimes when I say that because Caesar views himself as a first Caesar, and everyone else is just a copycat sort of thing. But anyway, when he first came to the knowledge of Divine Truth it was only about a hundred or so years ago. For nearly two thousand years he was in the hells of the spirit world working through different emotions. Initially when he arrived, the other spirits in the spirit world who were in the hells loved him, when I say loved him; they sort of almost worshipped him. You know how you get a picture from the Bible how you've got Satan and his demons, the devil and his demons, well if you can imagine Caesar was viewed as the devil by these other; in other words the worst of the worst. A thousand years he spent just working through pain, physical pain from what he did to others. If you can imagine screaming every day for a thousand years, that's what he went through. He did that without God. He got to a state where he was still in the first sphere by 1914. He got to the state when he was still in the first sphere but had done a lot of emotional processing, and then he heard about the Divine Truth. He is now a Celestial Spirit in the spirit world. So he lives at the moment around the thirteenth sphere of the spirit world, and he's a Celestial Spirit. It took him hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years just to work through the layers of the hells; 1900 of those years went past, and then it's taken him a hundred years to get from there to the Celestial Realms.

Now the first part was the Law of Compensation, the second part he actually invoked the Law of Repentance. The Law of Repentance is about coming to a point inside of yourself where you want to feel everything that you've done. And you want to get through that, and when you do that, when you're brave enough to do that, things change very rapidly then.

The reason why I've mentioned that is that there's many spirits with us today who are really in a dark state and are in terrible conditions of pain, what you would feel as physical agony and want to know how to get out of it. Can you imagine how hard it is to even hear somebody when you're in that state? What do you feel like when, I don't know if any of you have had an open wound and somebody puts their finger in it, its agony, isn't it? If somebody has ever felt that! Can you imagine being in a state where somebody is putting their finger in it and you're trying to listen to truth at the same time. Can you imagine that? Because that's what it's like being in one of the hells, being in such physical agony and yet still wanting to know how to get out of it, but trying to hear something when in such physical pain.

And so one of the reasons why the fourteen returned was to stop this from going on so that when people pass over at least they don't pass over into the hells. And at least they'll be able to be taught some truth about the spirit world rather than being in total agony, and not even being able to hear. Well you know yourself when you are in physical pain, how hard is it to go into the emotion of it? Sometimes it's so hard, isn't it; being in the pain itself and you just feel in the agony.

And humility is the thing that's going to help us all get there. Where we are totally open to seeing ourselves as we truthfully are right now, and frankly, you can understand why God requires this? You imagine what this world would be like, and what the universe would be like, if there was none of this that was going on. You could actually do huge amounts of damage, and one of the New Age philosophies is actually this; that I am here and I am Stalin, and I am here so that all of you can learn your lessons. You've heard that one? Like, Stalin was there so that forty million Russians who passed could learn their lessons. Is that why Stalin was there? It's not why Stalin was there. That is one of the furphies we tell ourselves so we don't have to feel the emotional pain that we have within ourselves when we damage other people. That's why it's there because we're not humble enough to actually accept that we have harmed others.

25. Humility is essential for our progression

Humility is such an important thing in your progression. It's essential to your future life. If you can be as humble as you possibly can and feel all of your own emotions and love the truth, and love to even feel all of the things that are exposed to you, what will happen is you'll progress so rapidly that in a year's time you won't even recognise yourself. And you are able to progress this rapidly here on Earth, but like I said, we are so addicted to the picture that we see in the mirror that we like to be better than what it really is. We don't want to come face to face with our own issues and problems and are our own things that we've done to harm others.

So I've had to do that and Mary has to do that, and every single person on the Divine Love Path is going to have to do that, come to see what we truthfully are. So I'm suggesting to you, don't judge that, but allow yourself to do that, let yourself look at yourself. Let yourself see what's really inside, allow yourself to see who you truly are. When you're humble like that, you won't get into a rage, you won't get into anger when someone points something out to you, you won't even get into anger when they are condescendingly pointing something out to you, because you'll automatically just go into looking at the emotions within yourself.

So you're notice over the last few months in particular, there are lots and lots of stuff now appearing about me on the internet, if you've been looking. Lots of stuff about what I've so called done with Mary and done with my life and done towards these other people, most of which hasn't of course occurred. But I have to feel my emotions about that. So you don't see me writing back to these people trying to tell them the truth of what really happened do you? Because I'm too busy trying to feel my emotion about that, about what they are saying because I just see that as a Law of Attraction event. It's a Law of Attraction event, "Ah that's what it's about, it's about getting criticised for the things I didn't do. There you go," and I can connect to that emotionally and I can grieve about that. In my first century life I was killed for that and there are huge emotions in me about all of that, so I have to work my way through those emotions; can you see that? Allow yourself to do it. Allow yourself to be humble and work through those emotions.

In the end they're helping you, all these people who are being condescending towards you and angry with you and upset with you, they are all actually going to be helping you. Helping you work through one more emotion that's preventing you from being at-one with God. And that's the way I look at it myself because the thing I want the most is my relationship with my Father back. I miss that. And that's what I want. So the way I feel about all of these different things is all I need to do is focus on my feelings about what's being created. And later on the truth is going to come out, but I don't even have to think about that or even feel about that; what I need to do is I need to feel what it feels like in this situation to be attacked, or feel what it feels like to be unjustly accused, or feel what it feels like to have people who don't even know me think they know all about my life, and they've never met me. Feel what it feels like for my beautiful soulmate to be attacked. All these different emotions I've got to work my way through and to be frank, we all do. We need to work our way through all these kinds of emotions.

So what I'm suggesting today is to, if you're having trouble being stagnant or if you're having trouble getting into anger, where you get into anger all the time and you can't get deeper, then look at this issue of humility, pray about humility, pray to God about learning to be humble, learning to really feel my emotions about every situation. Let yourself experience the emotions rather than focussing on what's going on and trying to correct it.

You see most often when you're attacked what do you feel like doing? Defending, so what we do is we put all this energy into defending the attack, don't we? 'I need to tell them the truth. That's not what really happened," and so forth and so forth and away we go, don't we? "It never was like that; it's not fair that they said those things," and all of those kinds of things. But all that is, is just surface layer stuff that doesn't help you become at-one with God.

The stuff that's really going to help you be atone with God is the bit that's underneath all of that which is, "I'm being attacked," What does it feel like to be unjustly attacked? Remember those times when I was little when I was being unjustly attacked and unjustly accused of things? All that unhealed grief in me that I have that I'm carrying around still creating all this Law of Attraction. That's what I need to feel and when I feel that, I'll be closer to God and for a start my Law of Attraction will change, but even if those people want to continue to denigrate me and pull me down, am I going to feel it? Not at all! You'll get to a state where you can have the entire world denigrating you and pulling you down, and you will still feel happy.

Now that's a pretty freeing state isn't it? You imagine that nobody in your life, no matter what they do to you negatively is going to help make you unhappy. And it won't be because you're intellectually skipping over that or avoiding that person or dodging that idea, it won't be any of those reasons; it will be because you feel it inside of yourself. I said to Mary yesterday, "I just feel absolutely rotten about myself," that's the emotion I'm working through at the moment, and I said to her, "I'm just looking forward to the time where I can feel that I'm an okay person again." Just imagine that to feel that you're an okay person, not even a good person, to feel happy and content with yourself rather than feeling like I've got this still. I've got shame still and all these different things still, and when I look back at the contrast between what I was and what I am now, there's so much grief in me about that. So much grief, and I've got to feel that too and I've been avoiding that, feeling that grief of the contrast of those conditions.

And my relationship with Mary when I look at what it was and what it is now, it's nothing like what it was. There's so much grief in that and my relationship with God, and I look at what it was and what it is now and there's so much grief in that. I need to allow myself to feel that grief and once we feel this grief that we have within us and be humble to experience it all, it will all be past and those things that we've lost will come back to us but in a totally different way, back into a more pure way that God intended them to be in the first place.

So what I'd like to do over the next month or so is remind you that whenever you are getting angry, upset towards other people, blaming other people or any of those things, I'm going to remind you that you're not being humble. Is that okay? And I want you to try and remind yourself, to notice in yourself whenever you're being angry, upset, blaming of others, in a rage, having feelings of hatred towards others and so forth, I am not being humble. And whenever you do that, pray to God about being humble. My most common prayer to God is prayer about being humble, because that's the fastest possible way back home to God. So let that be one of your most common desires and goals.

Now when that happens, then all of this desire you have for God and all of this desire you have for truth is just going to flow through you so much, and because you're humble your allowing all these emotional experiences. What's going to happen is you'll flick into this place in your own progression where it's no longer this great big chore that you will actually feel the changes happening in you. You're going to have firstly days and then eventually longer periods where you're actually feeling very, very happy, even with yourself, because you can be proud of yourself for being in a state of humility. I know this sounds strange but that's what you will feel. You will feel a sense of togetherness within yourself that is a state of being happy about yourself, you don't need it from anyone else, and you'll feel it within yourself. When you're happy about yourself and you'll feel that because you'll know that you're now allowing this seeking desire you have for God's Love, you're allowing this seeking desire for God's Truth, but you also know that you're now allowing and wanting all of your own emotions. And once you get to that stage, from there to being at-one with God is very rapid progression. It's only our resistance that ever prevents us from getting closer to God. It's only our resistance.

Anyway, I know it's not exactly what I had on the outline, so when you download the outline you'll see that it was probably a fair way away from the outline, but I wanted to talk to you about humility because it's such an important quality to develop inside of ourselves. And you know our shame that we have and our guilt that we have about ourselves, and then we also have a lot of sometimes pride about ourselves, where we think we're better than we really are and things like that. Unfortunately those things prevent us from being closer to God. So you know we need to let go of these things, we need to get into a state where we are actually desirous of all of these emotions that we have within ourselves.

Now I'm finding for myself that I'm getting right now down to real core grief, and it's a very relieving process for me now. Whereas, before I was still getting into shame, into other emotions that weren't as relieving. I'm now getting into these real core issues with my soulmate, with God and this grief that I feel, and now I can feel my body starting to change at last. I'm starting to feel different pains and aches and everything starting to go, and when I'm in the emotion it's all there heavy, heavy, very childlike in its experience and I can feel it leaving me, and I have a sense of hope now of where I'm at in terms of my progression. I can feel that things are getting much closer now because these are the core issues within myself that I need to deal with. And I know that when these core issues are released, things are going to change so much around me and in my own Law of Attraction. And I'm really looking forward to that. In fact I'm going to have a celebration of that.

A spirit friend said the other day, "Ah you should be celebrating more often than that," and that's probably true too, but the feeling I have is just that I want to have a huge party; I don't care about birthday parties very much as you know, but this is going to be a celebration. A personal one perhaps but it will still be a celebration that I can enjoy. But every one of us will get to this faze where you start realising, "Wow I'm at the core of my stuff now," and you know when you're at the core of your stuff, things are going to change shortly after that in great huge ways, just by being at the core of your stuff. So that's something to look forward to as well.

26. Spirit influence towards the people on the Divine Love Path

One other thing I'd like to mention to you before we go though is how much spirit attention we're getting now as a group. A lot of the spirit attention by the way is very negative and I'd just like to talk to you about that for a few minutes.

What's happening a lot is that in the spirit world, in the hells of the spirit world, there are still spirits who are doing bad things, doing evil things. And what they do mostly is they try to influence the Earth because that's one area that they do have access to. Now in doing that, what they do is they focus their attention on anyone who's getting better. In other words anyone who's growing in their condition of brightness, they wish to destroy and pull back down into the mud, as it were. If you can think of it like a resentful person whose resentful that you've got some money for example, what do they want to do? Well they feel like they deserve your money, they might even steal from you to get your money and so what they do is they impose their unhealed emotions upon you, and many of the spirits are now doing this. So this whole group of spirits now who are actually focussing on different people on the Divine Love Path and trying to pull you back down.

Now I talked about this in the first century a lot as well. In a way it's a battle for your soul, and this is where a lot of these movies and stuff, you know books come from, the battle of the soul-type things. There's one called "The Devil's Advocate", have you seen that? Where you remember the man, I think its Keanu Reeves, and you remember the devil, which was Al Pacino, they were constantly looking at his flaws. Do you remember that? They were constantly examining his flaws and trying to pull his flaws and draw him in through his flaws, into a more debased condition. It's a good movie to see if you haven't seen it.

And what happens is this is exactly how our spirit friends work with us. Many of the ones who are in a dark condition what they're trying to do is look at our flaws and they say, "Oh yeah, you know AJ he's got that unworthy feeling there particularly with women; so how can I affect that?" Now there are only two ways that that can be effective, one is I have angry women come at me and I feel sad about it, or the second way is that I have a woman project sexually at me and I feel like that's a good thing. There's only two ways that I can be influenced really with that emotion. And the spirit goes, "I can do some things with this." And if I'm not loyal to truth and loyal to love and humble, those three things that we mentioned right at the start; I can have a spirit having total pleasure in destroying my life. And many spirits take total pleasure in destroying your life.

Participant: Like in "The Devil's Advocate", can these spirits actually give you some good things to lull you into a false sense of security before they try to pull you down?

Of course, that's exactly how they work many times and so what they do is... so your mediumship starts to develop. We had a spirit come to us the other day, to myself and Mary, and the spirit was trying to encourage us to break up. They said a heap of things that sounded really, really logical. I said to Mary after it had finished, "That all sounds logical, but it's not very loving." Then we went through and analysed what was being said and you could see that it was quite unloving actually. In fact they went right down to actually telling us that we should break up, claiming to be a Celestial spirit.

Because we were in an emotional state working through things together, we could easily follow that advice and we could easily have said that was the advice of our spirit friends even, but when we analysed it they were trying to impose on our freewill. They were telling us what to do, which I've never seen a Celestial spirit do. They were telling us to break up, whereas when we're together we actually trigger our emotions more than when we're broken up. So actually what they're trying to do is slow down our progression, and so forth. And once we started listing down all of the different things that they were trying to do, it was quite easy to see who it was.

And this is the trouble you see. A lot of times we follow along with these things because we are easily manipulated here through our emotional condition, and this is where if you're in a state of love, and in a state of seeking truth, and in a state of humility, it is such a protection for you to stay in that state.

Now in a few weeks time up in Mackay I'm giving some talks about spirit relationships and one of the talks is about attractions; why spirits are attracted to us. So when you get to hear that talk at some point, it will be as a download, as an mp3 on the net. Hopefully it will give you a bit more background about what's happening with some spirit attractions that are going on around you. The next day I'm going to talk about the damage done to the human condition by these spirit attractions, and that will give you a lot more background about what kind of damage is done, physical body damage as well as spirit body damage, and also mostly soul condition damage.

26.1. Dealing with negative spirit influence

Now the reason why I'm doing those talks is that I can feel these spirits have ramped up their effort to harm you and some of you may have been feeling that oppression. My suggestion is to allow yourself to be humble. You know the truth, the love, be humble and pray a lot about receiving Divine Love, because that's the protection that you actually have for these things occurring.

Now I'm not trying to frighten you. I'm just giving you a heads up that many of you are going to be influenced negatively over the coming months away from what you originally believed was the right path, because of your emotions being hooked into these spirits' conditions. And what I wanted to do is give you an advanced heads up that that pressure will be coming upon you, and just to allow you to see that when these events occur what's actually going on. You see a lot of times we don't have a problem here on Earth as much as having a problem with a heap of unseen people who are influencing our life through our Law of Attraction.

Recently two spirits left me who have been with me ever since the time I was a child. Those two spirits were hooked in to my pleasing women emotions and they were really upset with me pleasing women. What they were doing was influencing me a lot, and eventually I got to talk with them and speak with them about what was going on. Then I recognised this emotion in me which is, I wanted somebody to protect me from women. Many of us have these emotions towards the opposite gender when the opposite gender has harmed us. We're looking for protection from the opposite gender. And so there are literally hundreds of thousands, millions of spirits who have a lot of inter-gender emotional issues. So when I have a feeling that I want protection from men, I'm going to get a heap of women spirits, if I'm a woman, attracted to me. If I'm a man I'll get a heap of men spirits who wanted protection from men attracted to me, and they will influence a lot of my decisions; that's what will happen through the Law of Attraction.

The reason why I wanted to give you that heads up is because if you remain humble and remain open to all of your own emotions, those attractions don't get created. They only get created when we suppress the emotion and therefore the soul is in a condition where we are in a condition of addiction, and when we have an addiction, it's not just the people, the people you see around you who respond to your addictions, it's lots of people around you who you don't see who respond to your addictions too.

And for that reason what I'm also going to do at the end of December, just before Christmas, is I'm going to be giving a talk about the Law of Compensation and the Law of Repentance. Then the next day I'm going to have a question and answer session for spirits. So all of you who are mediums or whatever, if you feel a question from a spirit I would like you to put your hand up and tell me the question. Also anyone that you've heard questions from, and you want to write them down I'm perfectly happy to get those questions. What we'll do is we'll do a question and answer session for spirits to help these spirits who are surrounding us to progress so that they can move forward.

Now myself and Mary have had some really interesting experiences with this over the last four weeks, because we've had a lot of spirits around us who have been really, really angry and in a rage, haven't we? Then within a half an hour's discussion they are in a totally different state. We had a group of four male spirits who were actually first century disciples who came to me. They'd been in the hells for two thousand years, and the reason why they were there was because I had a relationship with Mary. So what happened was I was alone obviously for a while in the first century after I began my public ministry, and then I met Mary and then we began a relationship. Because we began a relationship and the way in which I began the relationship with Mary was that I treated Mary in the same way as I treated any other person, and sometimes a lot better of course because she's my soulmate. I'd kiss and hug her and take her to bed, which I wouldn't do with any other person. But what happened was they were triggered about that, and angry with me. For two thousand years they stayed in that state of anger with me and rage with Mary, and then we had them come and talk and within about an hour they were on the Divine Love Path.

We had a group of nuns who come to speak with us who were with Mary, and when I told them who I was we had a long discussion about why I couldn't be Jesus, because I was having sex with Mary. We had to work through lots of different issues with them regarding sexuality, their bodies and all sorts of things before they would actually move forward. But that happened, they moved as well and they realised what had being going on for them. A lot of times we can help them, they're just people who we can help but if we don't notice what's going on, then you can't.

So what I'm saying to you is take notice of what's going on around you and then ask yourself what in me created this Law of Attraction? If you suspect a spirit is with you that has created an event, ask yourself what is within me, what was my denial, what was my lack of humility that created this action? Let yourself ask yourself that question, and then you'll be fine; you'll work through the issues. But if you keep denying, keep denying sooner or later they will hook into some issues that will cause you lots of triggers and they will use that issue against you, against your own progression, and there's many spirits in the spirit world who have a desire to do this.

So what we're going to do is we're going to start to really expose these spirits. A lot of people think I'm biting off a dangerous thing, but I feel the way to help them is to expose the truth of what's going on. Then talk to them about why they want to do it. So that's what we want to do over the coming months.

26.2. Spirits can pretend to give us Divine Love

Participant: AJ is it possible for a spirit to be pretending to give you the love of God?

Yes, totally.

Participant: Because I seem to be getting into causal sometimes and then getting pulled out of it very quickly like the love of God comes over me...

God doesn't do that actually so that's a spirit who's with you trying to get you out. God doesn't ever try to get you out of your emotions. God tries to keep you in your emotions. God wants you in your emotions a hundred percent of the time; that's where God wants you. So anything that helps you get out, that's spirit motivated or spirit generated, and is generated by a spirit who doesn't want you in that condition. So bear that in mind whenever those events occur.

Oftentimes what will happen is sometimes we interpret love to be different things. You see some of us interpret approval to be love, so when you receive an emotion of approval from a spirit, you then assume that's love. It could be just that you're addicted to the emotion of approval and when somebody gives it to you, it feels good and so you then interpret that to be, "Oh God gave me some love." It doesn't happen that way.

Participant: So how do we... how do I know sometimes...? I'll be processing say a feeling of being unloved for four days and then get to the end and, like Alex said, feel a lot of love and bliss; how do I know if I've released the causal emotion?

Well that experience is far more conversant with Divine Love experience than the one Alex just mentioned. The one Alex just mentioned was, he starts getting into the emotions and then he feels like somebody gives him some love and that sort of takes him out of the emotion. Now God doesn't do that, because God wants that emotion out of you completely, and so what God does is allow you to do through the experience until you get to the cause, and then God can work with that cause. So that might take three or four days and then God gets to that cause and now it comes out of you. Then you experience real bliss or real loving experience with God and you'll feel the difference between those two experiences.

Participant: But if you hit the causal, can that happen really quickly?

It can happen really quickly too yes, but just be very aware that you are very, Alex, very spirit influenced. You're a very mediumistic person and so there are spirits around you who want to get you out of your emotional work. That's something for you to be aware of personally, it might not affect the person who's not as mediumistic in the same way as it is affecting you. You just need to bare that in mind. Mary you had something to say?

Mary: I just wanted to point out that it is possible to receive Divine Love while you are processing a causal.

Yes, totally.

Mary: But it wouldn't take you out of the causal.

No. So anything that takes you away from the experiencing of the emotion generally is motivated by some other spirit who's trying to help you get away from the emotion. You've also got to ask yourself what is my Law of Attraction to that? So there's something inside of yourself that would attract such an event.

26.3. Spirits can pretend to be assisting us

Participant: Can there be spirits that believe themselves to be on the Divine Love Path and feel like they know what we should be doing, and influencing us to do what they feel we should be doing, but actually they're in quite a dark place?

Yes, certainly. And the only way you'll be able to tell again is if you're open emotionally, and you're always communicating with God. Remember that when you're longing, having a longing for God's Love, God always hears you and you need to learn to trust that. So the key is if you focus on your relationship with God firstly, everything else will sort itself out, you'll understand what was going on. Spirits will often try to falsify your condition or falsify their condition in order to get a connection. Many of them don't even do it for malevolent reasons; many of them do it because they're thinking that they're actually helping you. The group of nuns that were with Mary were feeling that they were helping Mary. They were helping Mary by detuning her from having sex. That's what they believed was pure and holy, all their life that's what they believed. The only way to get to God was to not have sex, so they'd connect with a godly woman and try to get her to not have sex. In the past many of these nuns have influenced women to not have sex and to become a nun just because of this influence. "This is how I get closer to God." So they think they are doing them a favour but in reality they are actually detuning them from a person's body, so therefore they're not doing them a favour.

Participant: And with respect to the Sanctuary with me falling off the backhoe and stuff, some people felt that I was pushed. It felt to me like there were some spirits who believed they were on the Divine Love Path and they feel they were actually helping me to learn lessons, and yet they're willing to hurt me for me to learn the lessons.

Yea, so obviously they're not on the Divine Love Path. So the key is, it's a Law of Attraction event still so you need to see what's going on. We talked about that emotion that drove and finished up with that action, you and I together, but in the end we've also got to notice that if somebody is doing that, how loving are they? Is that a suspicion I have? Then go with the suspicion, but ask yourself how loving are they doing that?

Participant: In actual fact they whispered in my ear, "This is to teach Graham a lesson." Then the backhoe broke down, the battery then went flat, then we went to fix the backhoe and he fell off, and because I don't hear voices normally, I don't get messages that way, this spirit went from me not being heard which was my emotion that they hooked into, and then went to Graham and he fell off and got hurt.

But again, it was a Law of Attraction event so you need to look through the emotion inside of yourself. But yes, those spirits believe themselves to be helping you when they are actually not helping you. This happens all the time. In day-to-day life how often does a person try to help you and is not being very helpful? You notice that in your day-to-day life, don't you? How many times do your mum and dad try to help you and they're not very helpful; they want to save you from yourself. How many times does that happen? It happens a lot. So many spirits pass with the same thing, "I'm helping the person, I'm not listening to what they want of course, but you know they're a bit deluded they don't really know what they want." They think something like, "Alex, he doesn't know what he really wants, I'll help him. He thinks he wants to feel his emotions. He doesn't want to feel his emotion; I'll just help him get out of those emotions." Do you know what I mean? And while that might be true, you might not want to feel your emotions to the causal level in that particular instance that I'm giving, the truth is they are not helping you by helping you do what they feel you really wanted. This happens a lot, so bare that in mind.

Participant: It's funny because the last few days Daniel and I have been travelling around and feeling that we've been followed a lot and we slept one time just out by a cemetery. But last night I was in extreme fear, which I am not usually at night. Usually I go, wherever I go I go and I knew it was unusual because I had flashes of pictures constantly. I had my eyes shut but they were awful, they were grotesque.

Sort of grotesque figures and grotesque events. Some of you have had really gross horror movie base types things presented to you and things like that.

Participant: And I couldn't sleep and it's so unusual for me that behaviour. When I woke up in the morning, some of the other girls in the house who are very similar had the same happened to them, and it was our first night in the house and it was... oh God... but...

So again look at your Law of Attraction. There's obviously fear in you of spirits...

Participant: Absolutely, it's just terrifying.

So let yourself connect with that and let yourself deal with it at an emotional, at a humility level. But don't then go and believe, "Ah I'm not meant to be here because I've got all of these attractions," this is just spirits who are in a bad place trying to influence you and...

Participant: But there seem so many of them though.

Oh there are; there are billions of them. There's billions of spirits on the Earth plane who are trying to influence Earth and many of them are in a very dark condition, but they only have power over you while you don't focus on dealing with your emotions. So you could wake up saying, "That was a terrible dream, that was a terrible experience we're not meant to be here, we're not meant to be here," and go off into this panic, and off you go somewhere else and they're just going to go, "Yeah that was easy wasn't it?" You know, somewhere that could have been good for you, "That was easy, it just got you out of that and into another place that might be a lot worse."

And this is the trouble, whenever you feel that your desire is being influenced by someone in the spirit world, it's because they are unloving. Spirits don't try to influence your desire negatively. When your desires are harmonious with God's Laws of love and truth, let's say you have a desire for music, art or whatever; a spirit wouldn't try to get you out of that desire. So if your desire was to come up and learn more about God, a spirit is not going to try and get you out of that desire who's loving. Only an unloving spirit would do that, and that's the thing to bear in mind. Alright I've got some unloving spirits around me. I get afraid about that, I go and deal with my fear stuff, I tremble and let myself work my way through the emotion. Hire out the "Emily Rose" movie or whatever, and really go into the emotion and trigger it and be humble and let yourself experience the emotion completely. Then those spirits will go, "Got to give up on that one, let's go try and find someone else who we can do that with." And eventually they'll run out of people; these are my hopes. And when they run out of people, then they're come face to face with their own emotions, and when they're face to face with their own emotions, that's when they'll progress.

26.4. Spirits constantly surround us

Participant: I just want to know what happens if you don't actually feel spirits around you?

Whether you feel spirits around you or not they are around you, that's the first thing. If you don't feel it, there's usually emotional blockages inside of yourself to feeling, which are usually fear-based. So the key is to ask yourself what are my fears about feeling spirits? Well you image if you felt spirits, you might be standing in the shower naked and having a shower and feel a spirit next to you, how uncomfortable is that going to feel? It's not going to feel very comfortable is it? Or you might be making love to your husband or wife and then you see some spirits there, that's not going to be very comfortable either is it? And then you might go into your child's bedroom after they've had a nightmare and feel the spirit that's just tried to harm your child, and that's not going to feel very comfortable is it? So you tell your child there's no such thing, you tell yourself there's no such thing and you try to tune out of it during sex or whatever, and that keeps it all away. But that's how we close ourselves down. The key is to open ourselves up, but do it in such a way that's humble and connects with our emotions. Open up emotionally as well. When you release the emotion, the attraction disappears so that's when we're actually benefited. So if you not actually feeling influenced by spirits then that's fantastic.

Participant: Can I just say though I used to be scared of spirits but since all of this I can watch anything to do with spirits it doesn't bring up any fear, so does that mean I've sort of released something?

Yes, but it doesn't mean you've released everything because you've yet to feel them.

Participant: When do we ever release everything?

You do, yes that's a false belief just stated there; you will release everything. On the Divine Love Path guaranteed you're going to release everything. Isn't that good? And it doesn't have to take a long time. So don't ever go down the track of saying, "Ah, I'm never going to release everything." Because all that does is slow down your progression. Let yourself have your desires.

26.5. Positive spirit influence

Participant: I guess I'm expressing a deep desire; can we talk about some of the spirits that might come around that will help us, that are Divine Love spirits I need to hear that please.

No, no I want to trigger your fears. (Laughter) Literally every one of you has sometimes ten's and even hundreds of Divine Love spirits surround you. The problem we face is that most of the time you don't feel them, just like we don't feel God most of the time, and that's because of our emotional injuries. But often they are there just trying to urge us on to live in truth, live in love, feel your emotions and they are often trying to give you a wall of protection, but they won't do it. You'll read this in the Padgett Messages that many times Divine Love spirits will step back when there's other spirits being attracted all the time. The reason why they step back is because if you're not dealing with the emotion, the fastest way to get you to have that emotion triggered is to have those spirits surrounding you to trigger the emotion. And so what they do is they step back and wait for you to work through the issue.

Now if we're humble, if we're listening to our indirect counsel and assistance and if we're humble about that, they won't need to do that very often, if at all. But what often happens is that we're not humble and then, of course, they need to step back from us and then we have a few negative spirit influences that trigger us emotionally and then we get through that emotion, and then they can help us again. But it's only when we're resistive that they step back from us.

26.6. Humility protects us from negative spirit influence

So understand that every single time that you stay in a state of humility, openness to your own emotions, every time you are seeking truth and every time you long for Divine Love, that is your most protected state, and there are literally hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of thousands of Divine Love spirits on the Divine Love Path trying to help you. Many of them will be surrounding you as your processing an emotion; they're also holding the space for you. So let them do that for you. So they have your best interest at heart and they will help you deal with the emotions. But as soon as you go resistive, they will need to step back and let you work through what it is you are resisting. And they'll try and help you in other ways, try to arrange things for you in such a way or try to prompt you intellectually by giving you little messages that seem to pop out of nowhere in terms of helping you stay on the path. But they are not going to do, and they are not going to feel your emotions for you, because nobody can.

So understand that all of you are being greatly assisted as well. But often because of our emotional addictions, it's the hooks to the spirits who are affecting us negatively that affects us the most. So we just need to learn to give up the addictions.

Participant: Recently on two separate occasions whilst I was asleep, the first spirit came in and showed me into a library of books where we stayed in the library and shared all the books that they loved, and he told me he was a librarian. On the second, a couple of nights later I had a chef come to me who showed me into his kitchen created in the spirit world and then cooked for me and I watched and smelt. Both of those experiences were very different to anything that I have ever experienced before. So could you shed some light? I know I have a love of knowledge and I have always wanted to be in a library, and I know I certainly have addictions with food and the smell of food, is that what's that's all about?

Everything is a Law of Attraction event, even your dreams and any visions you have had and any interactions with spirit you have had are all Law of Attraction events. So rather than me tell you what they are, the key is to now pray about what they are. Because remember this is not about me telling you things, this is about God telling you things in the end. Basically what I'm trying to do now is start to wean you off of me. I'm not a nursing mother so what I'm trying to do now for many of you is wean you off me, so that you can focus on your relationship with God directly. That will bring us all more and more together as we go through this process, so we'll all come together in love whilst we do that. But it's very important now to start asking these questions of your heavenly Mother. So you'll find in future more and more I'll be weaning you off of you asking me personal questions.

27. Closing Words

Alright, well thank you very much for your time today. Hopefully I'll work through a few emotions so that tomorrow is a better day and I'm sorry if today hasn't been as good as you would normally expect, but that's the way it goes. Bye for now and we'll see you tomorrow for those who are coming.

Appendix: Relationship With God: Humility Seminar Outline

### Introduction

Spiritual development is not about knowledge, but rather about love

Reminders of the two forms of Love

Natural Love – the love that comes from within yourself and is expressed to others

Divine Love – the Love that comes from God, and which enters and transforms the human soul

Reminders of how to progress spiritually on the Divine Love Path

1. Pray to God for Divine Love

2. Pray to God for Divine Truth

3. Be Humble

This discussion is part of a series about your relationship with God

Humility is the most important personal quality that you MUST develop if you want a relationship with God

True Humility cannot be arrived at by "trying", we must deal with the EMOTIONS that prevent humility

My 1st Century Experience

Reasons for my very direct statements of truth towards the Priests, Pharisees & Sadducees

Reasons for my very direct public statements about people who were acting in disharmony with Love

What I do now

Reasons for my very direct public statements about people publicly acting in disharmony with Love

Reasons for my public discussion of people's public displays of emotions disharmonious with humility

### What Is Humility?

Dictionary definition of "being humble"

Having a lack of false pride, unpretending, meek, defining characteristic of an unpretentious and modest person, someone who does not think that he or she is better or more important than others, free of illusions of self-deception

Jesus' definition of Humility

Having a burning desire and willingness to feel and experience ALL of your own emotions, whether those emotions are painful or pleasurable.

Having a burning desire and willingness to see yourself as God sees you

Having a burning desire to be as you really are, NOT as you hope you are

What Humility is NOT!

It is not deprecating one's own sanctity, gifts, talents, and accomplishments

It is not having a false modesty or humility, falsifying for the sake of receiving praise or adulation

It is not underestimating your true worth, nor an inability to see or talk about our own or others virtues

It is not humiliation

### Why Humility Is Essential (Aspects of Humility)

God's Love flowing into my heart depends upon my wholehearted desire to feel & experience ALL emotion

When I desire passionately to experience all of my own emotions:

My longing for God's Love becomes stronger than my longing for any other experience

My desire to feel my own emotions becomes my focus of attention in my personal life

I never attempt to use methods or techniques that shut down or dampen my emotional experience

I never get angry, resentful or afraid about having to feel my own emotions

I never feel that I am giving up anything or losing anything because I have chosen this path

Am I willing to lose family, friends, property, position, power etc just to receive God's Love?

Am I willing to look foolish & stupid in the eyes of those around me but continue to receive God's Love?

Am I willing to feel all the emotions about what I may lose on the path to at-onement with God?

Am I willing to feel all the emotions about being alone, being attacked, being belittled just to be me?

"Seek first God's Love and ALL these other things will be added to you" Jesus

"No one can come to God who is not first willing to lose everything; father, mother, sister, brother, friends, position, power, glory for the sake of their relationship with God" Jesus

God's Love flowing into my heart depends upon my WILLINGNESS to take responsibility for, experience & release fully without reservation all the error within myself that prevents God's Love from flowing

When I desire to take full responsibility for the experience all of my own errors, I:

I have a strong longing within myself to feel all of the personal pain inside of myself

I take full responsibility for all of my actions, & never blame others for my unloving actions

I desire with all my heart to experience the Law of Compensation for what I have done to others

I desire with all my heart to experience the CAUSAL emotions of what happened to me in the past

I desire with all my heart to abandon ALL of my anger, justifications, minimizations & denial

I desire with all my heart to experience my FEAR about becoming a trusting child again

Do I have a tendency to justify my anger or fear to God, others or myself?

Do I have a strong resistance about feeling my personal fears?

Do I use my intellect to tell myself that "I am over that now" when all indications are to the otherwise?

Do I resist seeing the damage I have done for others, and refuse to take full responsibility for the effects?

Do I have a tendency to deny, justify, minimize or shift the blame onto others for my feelings?

Do I resist seeing my own body shape, body pains or illnesses as indications I am in denial?

"God resists the proud, but gives His Grace to the humble" James 4:6.

"When he was being reviled, he did not go reviling in return. When he was suffering, he did not go threatening, but kept on committing himself to the one who judges righteously." 1 Pet 2:23

God's Love can only flow into my heart when I am willing to be as I truthfully am

When I am being REAL:

I always admit to others & myself what emotions I have within me no matter how others criticize

I am always truthful, & I never avoid telling the truth in any situation no matter what the result

I am always honest with God & myself about my flaws & I never justify them to others or myself

Do I desire passionately to be the person I truly am inside, no matter how bad that looks to others?

Do I desire truth AT ALL COSTS, no matter what the price may seem to be?

Do I desire passionately to DO what I know to be Truth, rather than just listen to it?

Do I often shrink away from personal truth, and misrepresent my true feelings in my actions with others?

"For if anyone is a hearer of the word, and not a doer, this one is like a man looking at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself, and off he goes and immediately forgets what sort of man he is." James 1:23, 24.

"But he emptied himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in the likeness of men, and in habit found as a man. He humbled himself, becoming obedient unto death." Phil 2:7, 8.

God's Love can only flow into my heart when I am truthfully willing to be taught by God

When I am completely willing to be taught by God:

I no longer feel self-important or self-reliant

I do not feel emotions of criticism of God's Laws or methods of teaching me

I demonstrate respect for God & Her Laws by instantly attempting to practice those I learn

I do not ignore or justify my own unloving thinking, words or conduct

I do not attempt to avoid my own unloving behaviour, nor to continue it knowingly

Do I love, respect and practice ALL of God's Laws of Love?

Do I excuse myself from practicing what I know to be Divine Truth?

Do I arrogantly feel I am better than God, and that God should bend His Laws to suit my desires?

Do I love my Law of Attraction (LoA) & feel my emotions WITHIN myself that create my LoA?

Do I often get angry with God, or angry when I hear about God's Laws?

Humility enables us to receive both Direct and Indirect emotional assistance & counsel

Direct Assistance is when:

Someone else with a loving motive & desire tells us directly what error is within

Someone else with an unloving motive & hurtful desire informs us what is "wrong" about us

Indirect Assistance is when:

A child acts around us a certain way that exposes denied emotion within us

Any animal around us acts in a certain way that exposes denied emotion within us

Any person around us acts toward us in a way that exposes denied emotion within us

Other people around us have discussions about matters that we believe we have resolved

Events that happen to us always indicate what we are denying in our soul condition (LoA)

God is constantly giving us direct and indirect assistance to help us become at-one with God

Most of the time, we reject both direct and indirect assistance from God because of a lack of humility

When I am completely humble and able to be taught by God:

I always look at the emotions inside myself when I get direct assistance

I always refer everything that is happening around me to attractions caused by my soul condition

I never blame others who have hurtful desires for taking actions that cause me pain

I always see that God is constantly trying to show me my own blockages to experiencing bliss

Do I receive direct exposure of my emotional condition with Joy or with Dread?

Do I long for others to tell me what things within me cause my disconnection with self or God?

Do I react with coldness, rage, anger, resentment, denial, etc when my emotions are exposed?

Do I recognize that even when others around me discuss an emotion there is something there for me?

Do I listen to people's comments to me as direction for me, or do I regard the person as lowly?

### Opposition To Humility

Arrogance

Arrogance comes from a basic untruthful emotion that I feel I am better than others:

Arrogance; an offensive display of superiority or self-importance, overbearing pride

I am automatically judging others as lesser than myself

I am setting myself up as having authority over others, usurping God's position

I am blasphemous & treating God's children as lesser than myself

Releasing arrogance is VERY difficult emotionally, & arrogance betrays a VERY dark condition

Arrogance is therefore an indication that I am not being humble

Ego

True Ego is the centre of self that God created within you

False Ego is the centre you have within yourself that society (parents, environment) has created for you:

Please see http://deoxy.org/egofalse.htm

Ego is the false impression of myself created by my environment

Both my environment & I wish to retain ego so I do not have to feel myself as I truly am

I am unwilling to see myself as God sees me, & retain a view only as society or I see myself

I become addicted to feeling good by doing what others want, or avoiding what others ridicule

Ego causes us to become addicted to admiration from others, & may even cause "false" humility

If I wish to retain my false Ego, & resist its exposure, I am not being humble

Judgment & Criticism

More will be said about judgment in another talk "The Human Soul – Dangers & Pitfalls Of Judgment"

The Judgment being discussed here is not:

Discernment; noticing the truth & then acting on that truth in a loving manner

I must openly state emotional Truth to all people who I interact with

The statement of Truth about situations or people is a requirement to remain at-one with God

e.g. I can state you are not being loving, that may be a Divine Truth, and is not judgmental

Judgment is the action of deciding that someone else is lesser than me, or I am better than him or her:

It is the emotional treatment of someone as more lowly than myself

It is the emotional treatment of myself as if I am superior to others

When I am belittling, condescending, snobbish, denigrating, patronizing then I am judging & not humble

Intellectual & Emotional Denial Of Unloving Thoughts, Words & Actions

More has been said on this subject in the talk "The Human Soul – Denial Of The Soul"

Intellectual & emotional denial of my own unloving thoughts, words & actions causes me to:

Justify; "I know that happened, but everybody does it"

Minimize; "I know that happened, but it's wasn't really that bad"

Shifting The Blame; "I thought/said/did what I did because of you"

Deny God's Laws; basically explaining to myself that I don't have to follow God's Laws at all

Deny God; my own opinion of what is right is more important to me that God's Truth

When I intellectually or emotionally deny my unloving thoughts, words & actions I am not humble

Anger With Others

More has been said on this subject in the talk "The Human Soul – Anger Is Your Guide"

Anger projected towards others is usually:

The result of the denial of my own fear or sadness,

The result of personal expectations or desires I feel others should satisfy for me,

An indication that I wish to blame others for my own painful emotions

An indication that I wish to blame others for my own personal desires not being met by others

Anger is therefore an indication that I am not being humble

Hatred Towards Others

Hatred or resentment towards others is usually:

A severe projection of blame aimed towards others to help me avoid my own painful emotions

I hate because I feel others must fix my own severe emotional pain

A desire to annihilate a person, place or thing because of the emotional pain it brought myself

A desire to cause as much pain to another person in order to avoid my own emotional pain

A desire to destroy the source of my own unhappiness or pain

A very strong emotion resisting Love (either from God or from others) from entering us

Hatred is therefore an indication that I am not being humble

Living In Fear

More has been said on this subject in the talk "The Human Soul – Fear Is Your Friend"

Living in terror or fear usually:

Is an excuse I use to prevent myself from feeling deeper much more painful emotions

Is holding onto a belief that the false is True & resisting the emotional release of the false

Is projecting damage to all living things around us & therefore not taking emotional responsibility

Living in fear, or working around fears in our life is therefore an indication of a lack of humility

Doubt

Living in doubt, rather than allowing the emotions under the doubt to surface:

I seek other people who are in doubt in order to support my own condition of doubt

I seek to cause other people to doubt to avoid my own fear of action

Doubt prevents us from living the Truth by giving us an excuse to avoid action

Doubt prevents us from acting on Truth we already feel in our own heart, which is a lack of humility

Seeking Power, Position, Glory, Respect or Value

Giving of yourself to others only for a feeling of glory, being noticed, respected, valued:

Often our motives for so-called "loving" action are totally selfish & self-focused

I seek emotions from others in order to feed my false ego, feed my false opinion of self

I seek emotions from others to avoid my own deeper causal emotional experience

I am avoiding the emotion of powerlessness, or being alone, no-one noticing me

This is a major emotional cause for our children to seek addictive substances

It is oppressive emotionally for others to always be required to emotionally support us

Giving of self only to get something emotionally in return is not a position of humility

Jealousy

Being unhappy, angry, resentful or in a rage that others are happy:

I project anger or needy emotions at others when others have things that I do not have

I am unwilling to experience the deeper emotions within myself about myself

I do not desire the best for others, but rather feel upset when others have success or joy

I feel that others should not be successful or joyous unless we also can be the same

Jealousy is an indication that we are not being humble

Commiseration

When we want others to commiserate with, agree with, or support our emotional state:

We grumble for the sake of attention

We complain about how "hard" everything is

We want others to agree with our own assessment of things

Commiseration is not taking responsibility for our own emotions & therefore not a state of humility

### How Do I Know I Am Being Humble?

I will feel a passionate desire to feel & experience all of my own emotion without damaging others

I will feel a passionate desire to take responsibility emotionally for everything happening in my life

I will have a passionate desire to be as I really am with everyone around me

I will have a deep desire for God to teach me everything I need to know

Divine Truth's will enter me easily without a struggle

I will receive direct and indirect counsel, criticism & assistance without resistance

I will enjoy being childlike even when those around me judge me or treat me condescendingly

