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This book is purely a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents contained within this body of work are not related to or portraying anyone living or dead. Any similarities are purely coincidental.

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Danielle

(Heavy On My Mind)

By

Candace Mumford

Danielle

What a completely shitty day, I thought as I burst through the front door of my home. My shoulders sagged and ached under the weight of my purse hanging heavily on my right shoulder. Attaché' in my left hand, all while balancing a piping hot, extra-large meat-lovers pizza with a large coke slushy on top between my hands. Kicking the door shut with my designer clad heel, I quickly reached over and managed to enter the code to my security system before leaning against the door closing my eyes with a loud sigh.

I was exhausted. Physically and mentally a sista was worn out. Thankfully it was due to high demand and my salon being busy. Lord knows it could be the opposite. I didn't want to complain too much. I tried to always count my blessing, but it didn't take away from the fact I was running on empty right now. This weekend I definitely aimed to recharge myself mentally and physically.

All afternoon I'd methodically plotted my entire weekend starting with this exact moment. The second I entered my home. I was locking myself in, while locking the world out. I'd already let the ladies. And men working at my salon "The Cutting Edge" know that short of the place burning to the ground, do not call me! I wasn't answering my phone and I dared anyone to show up on my doorstep unannounced.

"Home sweet home." I slowly murmured to myself looking around my place. It was truly my haven. Everything in my home was a piece that made me feel good. It made me smile. From the tufted navy-blue sofa and love-seat, down to the cream colored Flokati rugs. Accented gold framed abstract artwork stylishly adorned the walls. I prided myself on having painstakingly decorated every inch of my four bedroom, three and a half bath home myself. My Mother thought I was crazy buying a place like this all on my own at 27. "Why should I wait?" I asked. The first thing out of her mouth was for a husband. I was too independent in her eyes. What man was going to want me if I already had everything? She asked. "A man wants to feel needed." My Mama constantly chided.

Well too damn bad.

Any man with an ego so egg-shell fragile, that he couldn't handle me being a homeowner, wasn't man enough for me already. Shit if it made you feel less than a man, upgrade me! Get me a 10-bedroom mansion if you needed too. I wasn't going to complain. I was a lot of woman in more ways than one.

I kicked off my heels and made my way to the kitchen. The smell of lemon scented cleaner brought a quick smile to my face. I could tell Magdalena my twice weekly cleaning lady had been in today. I need to get Magdalena a gift certificate. Her birthday is coming up, I thought to myself. I'd barely laid my pizza on the counter when my cell phone went off. Even though I had no intention on answering, out of habit I glanced to see who it was. Lord this fool. My week had been so hectic, I'd ducked and dodged my favorite cousin's phone calls for the last three days. I was shocked she hadn't just come to the shop to see me. La'Toria's work schedule at the moment was very, very flexible. Which of course was my nice way of saying she didn't have a job.

"Hey Pooh!" I said with a sudden burst of energy. Her name was La'Toria but everyone in the family had called her Pooh since the day she'd entered the world. Or so I'd been told.

"Don't Pooh me! I've been trying to reach your ass all damn week!"

"I know girl, but this week was miserable for me at the shop. I've been there until damn near ten every night this week. I don't know what's going on around town, but it seemed like everyone had money to spend on their hair this week. I guess they're cutting these tax refund checks and everyone has money to get bad and bougie all of a sudden! You know it's already in my business plan, but I'm seriously considering opening up a second shop sooner than I'd anticipated. Hell, I was so happy to see Friday I didn't know what to do. Matter of fact, instead of being mad at me, be glad I picked up now. Because as soon as we get off this phone I'm officially off the grid for the rest of the weekend. No phone-calls, nada! Don't even text me. The only person who is going to lay eyes on me are the delivery men knocking on my door. I don't even plan to cook for myself this weekend. I'm strictly sipping and sleeping."

"Oh, hell no Danielle! You better get in the kitchen and drink you a Red-Bull, Monster, coffee... shit smoke some crack! You're coming out with me tonight, you promised!"

"Crack! Really bitch? I think you called the wrong cousin."

We both burst into a fit of giggles. Our cousin Terica was the known crack head of the family.

"You damn right! You know I told you last week Mark's cousin was coming into town and we were going on a double date. I asked you about this already."

I held the phone away from my face staring quizzically at it for a few seconds before snapping back to my senses.

"Wait a minute now. I remember you asking me and I distinctly recall telling your ass I wasn't interested. For one, I can barely stand your man. Facts. So, I can only imagine myself feeling the same about anyone sharing a gene pool with his donkey-brain ass. Two- You know damn well I don't do blind dates and the reasons why. So please stop with the bullshit right now."

Pooh was holding me up with this irrelevant ass conversation and my damn pizza was getting cold! I made my way over to the fridge and pulled out an ice-cold bottle of my favorite sweet, red wine. I loved it with a nice hot slice of pizza. I popped my slushy in the freezer for later.

"Dani please!"

I could practically see Pooh's lip stuck out through the phone she was so predictable.

I flipped open my box of pizza as I nestled my wide hips on a comfortable bar stool and took a hearty bite. This is heaven on earth right here, I thought to myself. Pooh was saying something but I zoned her out as I relished the taste of tomato sauce, pepperoni and sausage in my mouth. My eyes literally rolled back in my head. I barely contained the moan that escaped my lips.

"Eww! What are you over there doing? Better not be what it sounds like! I know your ass ain't had a man in a minute...you need to be jumping to meet Mark's cousin tonight. Ol' lonely ass."

"Pooh what the hell are you so worried about a double date for? I'm sure Mark's cousin is not excited to be set up either. What made you feel like this was a good idea? Plus, if he is that eager to be hooked up with a date, that's a red flag for me. He must be ugly as hell. Just as broke, busted and disgusted as your man is. So, I don't want his ass either. Done came to town broke as hell and is laid up on a relative's couch. As for his potential looks, shit your man over there looking like a yellow Harambe the gorilla. I'm sure primate runs all through their damn family." I said frowning my face up.

"Whatever bitch! My man is fine, and you know it. Not to mention I already told you Mark lays the pipe like no man ever has on me! I wish y'all would get over all this old animosity between you two. We're all grown now. I know he's cracked a few big girl jokes but don't act like he's saying something you never heard before. So get dressed Danielle. Come on now I need you. Don't make me look stupid in front of my man and his favorite cousin. I'm kind of trying to impress Mark's family. I think he's ready to propose."

My eyes rolled, I moved the phone away from my mouth while I sucked my teeth. Why did she always require me to be the bigger person? I'd bet money she'd never told her man to just leave me the hell alone. Yes, I'd heard more fat jokes than I cared to hear over the years, that didn't mean they were acceptable coming from her man.Especially since I went out of my way not to say a single, solitary word to him. I'd even stopped with the fake hellos. I didn't feel it was necessary. La' Toria was my favorite cousin but sometimes she had me all the way fucked up. If Pooh thought getting me to go out on a date with his cousin would win her points with Mark's family, those were some easy to please muthafuckas! Simple as hell. How about get a job? A place? Some credit. Far as I knew, Pooh didn't even have a bank account anymore she'd ran so many hot checks through it. My Auntie paid a grip of money just to make sure her ass wasn't sitting in Bexar County Jail. Pooh and I had always been close, so much so in fact that our mothers were twins and our birthdays were only a week apart. I was younger by exactly one week and one day.

That's where our similarities ended.

I had the rich chocolate complexion of our mothers and La'Toria was the light butterscotch skin-tone of her Father. La'Toria was short and with a slightly boyish build...she thought she had more of a banging body than she actually did if you asked me. I was 5'8 and stacked. Stacked may have been pushing it a little in some people's eyes but I think the term fits my body perfectly. Yes, I could stand to shed a few pounds off my size 22 body (on a good day 20!) but I'd long ago shed the cycle of obsessive yo-yo dieting that used to rule my world during my teen years and early twenties. After a short stint with modeling during that time, I'd finally stood up to my mother and let her know that walking the cat-walk was her dream not mine. If it wasn't plus-sized modeling, I wasn't interested. Of course, my Mama took that to mean I wanted to be fat and sloppy for the rest of my life. Which of course was a sad stereotype my Mama and the public in general chose to believe just because I was at peace with the extra pounds I carried on my body. Anyone who knew me knows I'm far from sloppy. You could call me fat if you wanted too. I was past taking offense to that word. But sloppy? Use that in reference to me and we have a problem.

My attitude these days was fuck anyone who had a problem with my body. It was mine to love or hate and believe me when I say, it had taken a little time to get myself into this head-space, but I was completely in love with myself. For the most part. I mean what woman was completely at peace with her looks? The most beautiful woman in the world could still find fault with herself.

As long as my doctor gave me a clean bill of health the rest of the world could kiss my fat ass. Literally.

"Look Danielle, it's not like his cousin is pressed for a woman...,"

"Then why are you bothering me about it? Shoot how do you know?" I cut in sharply. Shit this was not how I'd planned to spend my evening, arguing on the phone.

"Because Danielle! Look I was supposed to plan a little welcome home get together for Mark's cousin. But damn when I checked my bank account last week uh-uh! That's when I came up with us going on a little inexpensive double date! Come on, I think it will be fun. Mark's even springing for dinner." Pooh coaxed.

Mark? We must be double-dating at McDonalds if he's paying! I laughed to myself. I just kept my mouth closed. Here Pooh was begging me to tag along, how come her man didn't give her the money to throw a little get-together for HIS cousin? I guess that sounded too much like right and was totally escaping my cousin.

"Welcome home? Did the Negro just get out of the penitentiary or what? Nope! I can't do it." I said adamantly. Surely my own cousin didn't think just because I was a big girl I'd be happy to have any Black man leaving the penal system? I sure hated to flex my pedigree on folks but if I had to I surely would. Please believe I had some standards. Not that a man who had been to jail was off limits, anyone had the ability to change their life for the better but damn, a man fresh out of jail wasn't never going to be my first choice!

"No! He's just been living in Virginia for a really long time. I think his Dad was in the Navy or something and they moved there when he was like ten. So the whole family is just really excited to have him back here." La'Toria said huffing like a fire breathing dragon into the phone. I didn't care. I was on my second slice of pizza at this point and now that my hunger had subsided a bit and the wine had me feeling a bit more mellow I was feeling a bit more amiable.

"I still don't get why his family can't just deal with him. Why is your broke ass is offering to throw a damn party and you still stay with Auntie? Mark hasn't even proposed yet and he's delegating you to plan family parties and shit? His own family should be throwing something not you."

All I heard was a long ass sigh on the other end of the line. Pooh hated for me to remind her she was wasting some of her best years on a man who had already told her straight out she wasn't the type of woman he would marry. I was ready to come unhinged and shoot up this man's house when Pooh told me that mess! So I had no earthly idea what made her think he was ready to propose. Granted my cousin wasn't the most motivated person in the world but she was good at heart and deserved better than his low-down ass. They were on the same level financially so pot meet kettle.

"Well I could be rooming with you! How am I your favorite cousin and you won't let me move into that bad muthafucka you over there laid up in? Don't even get me started on the fact you won't hire me on at the shop. Because you're foul as hell for that. Every time I think about it I get mad all over again. Shit, I could be over there washing those folks raggedy ass heads!"

I couldn't help bursting out laughing.

"Whatever. January 2013 through January 2015. No need for me to say more." I said cackling loudly as I reminded her of the two years I did live with her. The two years she never had all her rent or bill money. That was my first and last experience with a roommate. It made me even more determined to stack my coins so that I never had a need for one again. I didn't want anyone living with me, on top of me or under me. I required complete solace. As for working for me? My business was something I wasn't playing with at all. I was not about to write paychecks for my cousin to sit on her ass and not do anything. Before I even opened my shop, I knew I wouldn't have Pooh in there working in any capacity. She'd made one too many slick comments about being able to get over since she was my cousin. Already making assumptions that she would have a position. The nail in the coffin was word got back to me that she'd lied and told someone she was a co-owner.

I'd confronted her about it she tried to cover it up and say she was just playing around with the girl. If it was a joke. I didn't find a damn thing funny. Nope. I was not about to mix my family with my business. I'd even had to be firm with my Auntie when she called asking if I could find a spot for Pooh at the shop until she found something stable. Luckily for me I could honestly say I had a full staff already.

"I was going through something then. You should have been a little more understanding is all I'm saying. Look Dani do me this one favor. Especially since I already told him you were coming." Pooh pleaded.

"WHAT!"

"Yeah girl, he was over Corey's house earlier and I talked to him on the phone. I mean he sounds good if that's any consolation. Plus, he's related to Mark, so you know he can't be too bad looking!"

I almost choked on my wine. Primate.

After clearing my throat with several coughs, I sucked my teeth loudly and bit my tongue. In a nutshell I found her taste in men to be lacking and Mark was disgusting to me in more ways than one.

"Ugh! Look I'm already telling you I'm not into this tonight but since you're my favorite cousin I'll do this. I will meet y'all somewhere. That way if I'm not feeling it, I can leave without waiting on anyone to take me home. Hmm, on second thought I'm already sipping so I'll just take a Lyft there and back."

"You have to stay at least three hours!"

"No the hell I don't. Look don't press your luck. Text me where and what time. Now bye. Damn let me at least get a nice soak in the tub. You messed my whole night up." I grumbled.

"Thank you cousin..." La'Toria cooed, "...I owe you big time."

"Yeah whatever." I said before I hung up on her ass. Pooh was good for saying she owed somebody and never had any money and hardly paid back with favors.

Chris - Later That Evening

"So, Chris tell me what brings you back to San Antonio?" My cousin's girlfriend Pooh asked.

Why? Is the first thing that came to mind.

What the hell kinda fucked up ass name is Pooh for a grown woman? I bit the corner of my lip to keep from laughing because ol' girl had been skinning and grinning in my face from the moment we were introduced at the house. I could spot a hoe from a mile away and I knew from the jump my cousin had his hands full with this one. Not to mention the fact she was batting her eyes damn near a hundred times a minute it seemed with those long ass, fake eyelashes on. These females killed me now days. Just fake head to goddamn toe. Instead I played it cool.

"Nothing in particular. This is where the majority of the family is and for the most part we stick together. My Mom moved back five years ago when she retired and she's getting older you know. I can't have her out here by herself. I also had a good job opportunity." I answered politely trying to back this hound-dog up off of me. I glanced across the table at my cousin Mark, but this nigga was too busy stuffing rolls down his throat he couldn't see his woman was trying to eye fuck me something fierce.

"Well my cousin Danielle should be here any minute...,"

"Oh, she can come or not come. We're all just eating here as friends." I said quickly cutting her off. I have no idea whose bright idea it was to set me up on a blind date, but I wasn't with it at all. I couldn't wait to dig into this niggas ass later on about trying to set me up on a date.

"Well you know I thought it would be fun for us to double date since you're basically new to the city and all. I know how hard it can be moving somewhere new."

Who told her I like to have fun?

"So, you've moved around a lot Tori... umm Pooh?

"It's La'Toria. No, I've lived here all my life...,"

"So, you really don't know anything about moving somewhere new since San Antonio is the only place you've ever lived. But I do get what you're saying." I cut in quickly. I couldn't stand a phony bitch. Maybe she was trying to be nice, but just in case I decided to sprinkle a little sarcasm on my comments. I'll bet her ass would slow all that damn blinking down now.

"So, where your fat ass cousin at Pooh? Shit the minute you said free food I thought she'd be on deck! Just so you know, you are helping pay for this too. Since this ain't what I told you to plan anyway. I wanted a relaxed kick-back at the house. Your ass ain't slick, you just wanted to go out to eat." Mark managed to say after demolishing the entire bread basket.

"Nigga the way you just ate all the bread up from everybody I think you wanted to eat out too." I said cutting my eyes at him. "I'll be back in a second I'm going to the bar." I needed a drink to calm my nerves and make it through this "date". If I wasn't hungry as hell, I'd dip out on their asses right now, I thought slipping through the crowd.

This nigga got me fucked up.

How my favorite cousin gon' set me up with a fat chick? I mean it ain't like I consider this to be a real date or no shit but damn. I made my way through the crowded steakhouse. Brazas, was located on the River-walk so needless to say it was packed as hell on a Friday night. The smells wafting throughout the place had me ready to chew my own arm off. I wasn't up to drinking too much tonight, so once I landed at the bar I ordered myself a top-shelf margarita along with a beer. Let me calm my ass down and stop being rude too, I thought. My Mama didn't raise me like that. I didn't have to come. I could have said no, so no sense in being rude no matter what this woman looks like. I maneuvered my way towards our table but stopped dead in my tracks. Damn! Is this ol' girls cousin? I stood back a few minutes longer to get a better look. If this was Tori, Pooh or whatever the hell she called herself cousin, she was a big girl no doubt. Larger than women I'd been with in the past, but she definitely wasn't bad looking. Not bad looking at all, I thought my eyes taking a slow stroll up her body. DAMN! How is she even carrying all that ass and thighs on those tiny stiletto heels? Her toes were painted a shade of hot pink that complimented her dark complexion. My eyes slowly raised up to the thick curve of her calves and up her thighs in the form-fitting pair of skinny jeans she wore. A white, lacy top peaked from under a short, black jacket. Damn ain't nothing like a sista. Get it together nigga, I thought stepping forward and approaching the table. I was 6'4 in height, in heels this sista was about 6 foot her damn self.

"There this nigga is!" Mark stated loudly. I knew he'd probably been heard two tables over as I cringed inwardly. Hell, I was trying to cut down on my personal use of the word but the last thing I would ever do was speak it in public conversation and loudly at that. "I thought maybe your ass ran off. I know I would if I saw this big linebacker standing here." Mark stated loudly chuckling to himself.

I exhaled deeply through my nose. This ignorant Negro right here. I cut my eyes quickly at my cousin, but this nigga was too busy with a beer turned up to his lips, he didn't catch my look to see he was starting to piss me off. How many beers had he drank already? We'd only been here a good thirty minutes at the most and this was about his fourth beer. Shit I'd already checked myself about prejudging this woman and here she was fine as hell, now here this dumb nigga (yeah, I said it, but it was in my head) was acting up and embarrassing me before we'd even had a chance to be introduced.

Danielle

See this is exactly why I did not want to be anywhere near Mark's childish ass. I failed to see what my cousin saw in him. Though if I was really honest, they were a perfect match.

"Negro you're the one sitting over here looking like a yellow silver-back gorilla. Are you sure the two of you are related?" I asked the fine brotha now standing by my side. He laughed lightly shaking his head as he sat his drinks on the table.

"Unfortunately, yes. Nice to meet you, I'm Christian. You can call me Chris." He said extending his hand to me. I accepted his hand and damn if the manly roughness of his large hand engulfing mine didn't send a slight tingle up my spine.

"Well damn sit ya' big ass down so we can order! Took you long enough to get here. I'm ready to eat. See if you can squeeze all that ass in the damn booth." Mark barked sucking his teeth loudly.

"Mark you do not have to be so rude to my cousin! I don't appreciate..." Pooh started.

"Did I ask you what you appreciated? Be glad your ass is out to dinner for a change instead of trying to embarrass me in front of my family behind your fat ass cousin." Mark said pinning his eyes angrily on my cousin.

I was on the verge of coming undone right then and there but I quickly composed myself and looked at my cousin. Surely, she was going to check her so-called man about speaking to me this way. Hell speaking to her that way! There this bitch sat with her eyes in her fucking lap. Mark is gonna fuck around and make me slap his ass tonight and believe me when I say it's a long time coming. Nope. I'm not even stooping to his level tonight. His cousin is good-looking, but I did not step out of my house to be disrespected tonight by anyone. Besides, Pooh seemed to act like she couldn't ever check her man when he got out of pocket which he did on the regular. What could I expect though? Mark didn't have any respect for Pooh so ain't no reason in hot hell with the rocky past between us, that he would have any for me. I damn sure was not going to be part of this side-show tonight.

I turned to Chris.

"It was very nice to meet you, welcome back to Texas but I will not be joining you all for dinner tonight. My cousin here may enjoy being disrespected and verbally abused but it's not my thing. Never has been, never will be. You all enjoy your evening." I said turning to leave, I glanced over at Pooh and she looked like she was mad and wanted to say something. I paused to look at her, eyebrow raised to give her the opportunity to get cussed out in public if she wanted too. I loved Pooh like the sister I'd never had but we'd gotten into it before. If I had to cuss her out so be it. She'd just have to get over that shit. She pursed her lips tightly then spoke. Really bitch? Two seconds ago, her ass was mute.

"Oh, come on Danielle! Just sit down. You know you and Mark always go back and forth like this. Stop acting like you can't take a joke. You're already here. May as well enjoy the free meal." Pooh said. All of a sudden, she'd found her goddamn voice.

"Actually, Mark and I don't do shit together because I can't stand to be around him, and you damn well know it. I have plenty of damn money so unlike you, I'm not beat to have some man pay for my meal. Since I came all the way over here, I have every intention of enjoying dinner. I just won't be doing it with you all."

With that I turned and walked over to find a waitress. Shit, I'd already paid for the Lyft, used my good makeup and put together a quick outfit for the night. I was not about to waste all that. I may as well have a drink and Brazas was one of the best steakhouses in San Antonio. I was damn sure getting something for my time and effort coming all the way here.

Chris

"Man, what's your damn problem being so rude to that woman?"

Mark waved me off.

"Man, she ain't shit. Danielle think just because she got a house and that shop her fat ass can talk down to people. Fuck her big ass. Nigga I done seen the type of females you role with. Hell ya' baby mama even. You wasn't gon' do nothing with her big ass. You ain't missing out on shit."

Granted I didn't usually pay much attention to plus size women, but I didn't appreciate another man, family or not, thinking he knew what type of woman I liked. I felt like I was the type of brotha who could switch it up with any type of woman depending on my mood. Hood-rat to the boardroom. Besides, what did my past women have to do with him openly disrespecting a Black Queen regardless of her size?

"Man miss me with all that. This shit right here is making me be a third wheel. I'm about to go find your cousin and apologize for my cousin's bad behavior." I said glancing over at La'Toria before I grabbed my drinks and left. I could already hear my cousin cussing her out even though he was the one who ruined the night.

Boom! There she is, I thought making my way through the crowded dining room where Danielle had somehow managed to get a small two chair table towards the back by a window facing the river-walk.

"Excuse me Ms. Lady, would you mind if I joined you for dinner despite my cousin's rude behavior? Trust me when I say it doesn't run in the family." I stated. I even threw in a wide smile for good measure. Shit a nigga didn't know a lot but I did now I had a Colgate smile. All thirty-two teeth were straight and white than a muthafucka!

Danielle peered at me through narrowed eyes as she took a long sip of the drink in her hand. She took so long to respond I was starting to get a little nervous. I did look a little odd standing in the crowded dining area holding my drinks.

"Look at this begging nigga right here." I heard from a group of sistas sitting at the table next to Danielle.

"Look please don't feel obligated to come over here and make nice or anything. I know you were put on the spot with this whole double date thing just like I was. Why don't we just leave it at that?"

Goddamn! Was she really gonna leave me hanging? I took it upon myself to take the other seat across from her. Besides, the hens at the next table were drilling a hole through me they were staring so damn hard.

"You're right. I wasn't pleased with it, but I figure since we're both here and hungry. Why not make the most of it? Plus, I think we can do a better job of this blind date situation without any help from our cousins."

Danielle burst out in a fit of giggles, paused and rolled her eyes at me.

"Well okay then. Since you already sat your ass down anyway. And stop with that cheesy ass grin. I get it, you have a nice smile and some pretty teeth."

"Oh, you caught that huh? I wanted to make sure you noticed." I said grinning even wider if that was at all possible.

"How could I not? Standing over me looking like the damn Joker."

"Oh, you got jokes I see." My lips pulled down into a frown.

"I do a little something every now and then." Danielle said flashing a smile of her own.

I can't even lie, I kinda felt myself blushing a little on the inside and happy as hell she didn't turn me away. I mean I didn't want to toot my own horn but for the most part, most women liked me. I was above average height standing 6ft4 inches tall. I had a muscular build, I'd always participated in sports my entire childhood through college. Smooth caramel brown complexion, the perfect blend of my dark-skinned mother and light skinned father and fuck it why beat around the bush? I just looked good period. It was like God sent my father's most perfect sperm to connect with the best egg my mama had, and I can say that with no guilt since I'm an only child. I was the spitting image of my father. Which according to my mother was a blessing and a curse with all the hell he gave her regarding other women.

A waitress came over, took our order and the conversation between us flowed effortlessly. The only interruptions were two phone calls I received but once I checked my caller ID, I quickly sent those to voice-mail. Before we knew it, damn near three hours had passed. We were both full. The entire time we'd kept the drinks flowing to our table since neither of us were driving that night we'd both decided to indulge.

"Despite the start this was nice Christian, I'm glad you joined me. Excuse me for a moment please. I'm going to run to the ladies' room." Danielle said before excusing herself from the table. Our waitress came by and laid our bill on the table before asking if we'd like anything else. I told her we were fine. I could see by the now thin crowd in the restaurant, Danielle and I were among the late-night stragglers. I reached over and grabbed the check. Granted we weren't on an official date or anything but as a man I felt obliged to pick up the tab. Besides, I could only speak for myself, but I'd thoroughly enjoyed her company. Though I got the feeling she did too.

Goddamn! My eyes bucked looking at the two-hundred-dollar bill. That didn't even include a tip. Damn! It ain't like I didn't have it but still.

"Is everything okay?" Danielle asked sliding back into her seat. "I think we're about to close this place down. Let me call for my ride." She said grabbing her cell-phone out of her clutch. After a few minutes of pushing buttons she looked up.

"Is that our check? Here let me see."

"Nah don't worry about it, I got it." I said waving her off as I reached for my wallet.

"Absolutely not. This wasn't a date. Hell, we aren't even friends so let me pay for what's mine." Danielle said adamantly.

"I said I got it." For good measure I snatched the check from her grasp and gave her fake mean mug before I pulled my wallet out and threw a few bills in the check folder.

"Well I really appreciate it. Maybe all the men in your family aren't like your cousin after all." Danielle quipped.

"He's a good guy. I mean he has his ways but he's my favorite cousin."

It didn't escape me that she pursed her lips tight and cut her eyes at me. Danielle looked down at her phone.

"Well my ride is here. Thank you once again for dinner Christian. I'll have to return the favor one day."

"Well let me walk you out and get your number. I'm new in town and I'd love a home-cooked meal." I said as we walked towards the exit.

Danielle stopped so suddenly I rammed right into the back of her before she whipped around with her hands on her ample hips.

"What do you mean by that?" She asked. Her nostrils held a slight flare.

"By what?" I asked confused as hell.

"You said you'd like a home-cooked meal. I guess you assumed since I was a big girl I just stay in the kitchen slaving over pots and pans huh? Why would you even say that? If I was the same size as my cousin, you wouldn't be suggesting we go eat." Danielle said swinging the door of Brazos open and stepping into the warm, balmy San Antonio night air. Even through it was late and we were near the water it was still a bit humid out.

"Hold on now. Look if you got some insecurities about your weight, do something about it I...,"

"I am not insecure about my weight! I just can't stand the stupid shit that comes out of some people's mouth."

"What the fuck did I say? I don't even know your ass and I just dropped two hundred dollars on a meal with you! I make a comment it would be nice to get together and enjoy another meal and it's a fuckin' problem?" I asked throwing my hands up in the air.

Danielle stalked over to the waiting Lyft and opened the car door.

"It's the way you said it asshole!" Danielle screamed before getting in the car.

I stood there several minutes dumbfounded. So, cooking dinner at home is an insult? What the fuck. I ain't never heard no shit like that before. Is this just for big girls or what? I had no idea but if it was, I was done! I liked me a woman who could throw down in the kitchen. Shit, I didn't mind dining out but damn, you can't eat out all the time.

Danielle

I pulled into my parking space in the front of "The Cutting Edge" Monday morning tired as hell. Damn I should have stayed my ass home today, I thought grabbing my purse, attaché and the piping hot breakfast of link sausage, grits, eggs and toast I'd picked up at the Soul Cafe' on my way in. What should have been a peaceful weekend of relaxation for me had turned into one of pure misery. Damn Pooh! This was all her fault.

That Friday from the second the Lyft drove off I'd berated myself for overreacting about the home cooked meal comment. Had I completely overreacted and made a fool of myself in front of that man? A fine ass man at that. I mean it's not like I wanted him for anything. The last man I would be interested in would be someone related to Mark, but I certainly didn't make a habit of acting foolish. It nagged at me all weekend long. Even while I was having my session of mindless TV and catching up on Love and Hip Hop, my mind kept drifting to Friday night at Brazos. I walked in and locked the door back. I was always in before everyone else, so I had a good hour to go before my stylist Tara came in. She always had early morning clients, preferring to set her schedule that way so she could be done before 3:30pm when her kids got out of school.

Oh well fuck it. I began to eat my breakfast and chose to put it out of my mind. It ain't like I'm going to see that man again anyway. He was fine though. I damn sure can't front on that. I'm over it. With that, I went on about my day. Even though it was a Monday the shop was just as crowded as if it were a Saturday. I was blessed. Busy but blessed. As the day wore on, three stylists came in and one of my barbers were in starting the day with me. I had a total of ten chairs available in my salon not including my own. I was fortunate in that at this point I didn't take walk-ins myself, I booked by appointment only and had made a name for myself by doing some of the best weaves in San Antonio and the surrounding areas.

I had one of my regular customers in the chair when the door chimed, and a female stormed in like a raging bull.

"Oh, Derrick you really think you're going to ignore my calls? Keep sending me to voice-mail? Nigga you got the wrong baby-mama for that bullshit" She roared. My eyes shot over to my barber Derrick who looked like he wanted the floor to open up and swallow him. It was 11o'clock and we had a full house. Most shops were closed on Monday's but not us. The demand for our services was too high.

"Umm excuse me...," I said quickly stepping away from my client, "...we don't do that type of drama in my shop! No ma'am. Not today. Not ever."

"KiKi take your ignorant behind home! I told your ass I was coming over when I got off to take my daughter shopping."

"Well I'm here now so just give me the money!"

"I said OUT!" I seethed. Derrick leaned down and said something to his client before quickly escorting his irate baby mama out the door. I was going to have to call him into the office before the end of the day because what I could not have going on in my shop was shenanigans! This was the third time an incident like this had happened. With each of his baby mamas! Now Derrick was a fine, young tender and provided a bit of eye candy for the ladies in the shop. He also had a roster of clients that did come in just for him, but I was not going to have that type of disruption in my place of business.

I went back to my client's weave.

"I guess these lil young hoes be all over that boy huh?" My client Theresa observed.

"Girl you don't know the half but I ain't putting up with that mess in here." I said as my hands wove magic throughout my client's hair. Theresa's edges had long ago been snatched bald but when I got done with her, you couldn't tell. I had a technique I used to recreate snatched edges as if they'd never gone missing. As always, she was impressed with the job I'd done and praised my hands. It made me feel good to help my clients keep their confidence up in regard to their appearance. Granted all my edges were intact but I knew what it felt like to have self-esteem issues. I'd been there. Bitch you still there after the way you bit that man's head off on Friday! I quickly thought. No sooner had I said my good-byes to my client did Pooh come sashaying her po' tail through the door. With Mark and Christian trailing right behind her. Speak of the damn Devil and he shall appear, I whispered under my breath.

I groaned internally. I didn't want to care how I looked to Christian, but I couldn't deny the fact I did. I was dressed down in a pair of leggings and comfortable shoes since I was taking clients today and of course I had my custom smock on. I ordered my personal smocks from a lady on Etsy. I loved having my things blinged out. My hand flew to my head and slowly smoothed up the loose ponytail I'd thrown in my head. My saving grace was I always left my house with my face beat. Not that I had anything against women who didn't care for makeup, but I happened to love it.

"Hey y'all." I said mainly to Pooh. I gave Christian a quick glance and Mark a cold stare. I couldn't help wondering why the hell Pooh had even let him come in. She should have made his ass wait in the car.

"Well ain't no one heard from you all weekend. Then Christian said y'all had a nice time at dinner but you left before he had a chance to exchange numbers with you. So, when I was over Mark's I heard him saying he was looking for a barber in town. You know damn well I was gonna tell him to come over here. Derrick can hook him up."

"Yeah running your goddamn mouth too much." Mark cut in looking at Pooh like he wanted to slap her.

I swear to God I had no time for mess today. The incident with Derrick already had me at my daily quota! My nerves were shot just with them walking through the door. Then I was trying not to be obvious, but I was finding it hard to tear my eyes away from Christian. This man's arms were tatted in full sleeves on both arms and Lord knows I loved a man who was inked up. Definitely no jail-house raggedy tats on this man. Everything was perfectly placed and cohesive and the colored tats were done perfectly to pop on his brown skin.

"So, can I speak to you in private for a minute?" Christian asked.

I rubbed my hands nervously on my thighs and looked around the shop. When I didn't see any reason to turn down his request I nodded my head and turned to walk towards my office at the back of the shop. On the way there I spoke to a few ladies who were relaxing in the T.V room I had set up for clients who were waiting to be seen.

"Damn! Who is that?" I heard one of them say.

I stepped into my office with Christian right on my heels, I was a bit shocked when he took it upon himself to close the door. Who said I wanted to be boxed in with you like that? I had been kinda rude. This man could have been stewing mad all weekend long, so I hurried up and spoke.

"Look Christian, I'm actually glad to see you today. I wanted to apologize for how badly things ended on Friday night. I know I may have jumped the gun a little." I managed to eek out before I was struck silent when I saw he had me pinned down with a death stare.

"A little? No, you jumped the gun a lot. You were rude, arrogant, made assumptions about me and the whole nine yards. In turn you made me say some things that I may not have said. All weekend long I've been trying to figure out exactly what I said to offend you in the first place? Explain yourself."

All I could do was hang my head I was so embarrassed. I must have come off as an insecure fat girl, with no manners who'd never had a handsome man treat her to dinner before. My hand flew to my forehead where I rubbed it softly. What did I say to him, so I wouldn't come off like an even bigger fool?

Christian leaned against the closed door staring at me with his arms folded across his muscular chest.

"Oh, today you're at a loss for words but Friday night you had a lot to say didn't you?"

I stood there mute.

"Y'all women kill me. A nigga can't win for losing. Look don't take what I'm about to say offensively or anything I just say what's on my mind straight up. Me making the comment about having a home-cooked meal with you wasn't meant to be a jab at you. That was my way of saying I'd like to break bread with you again. I enjoyed your company and wanted to see you again. I don't know how you took it any other way? I mean I bugged the fuck out! If you can't cook I ain't gon' lie and say that ain't a major turn-off to me personally but we ain't nowhere near that anyway, we just met. I personally like good food as you very well could see that night. Your cousin told me you're a career woman and all. Cooking may not be your thing."

What the hell? This man was standing in front of me rambling on about how I must not be able to cook? I couldn't even be mad.

"Christian I can cook. Actually, I'm an excellent cook if I do say so myself." I said crossing my arms.

"Well why did you blow up on me like that?" He asked genuinely baffled.

I decided to just be honest.

"I thought you were just saying that because I'm you know...a little fluffy." I said softly.

A blank look came over Christian's face.

"Fluffy? What the hell is that?" He asked confusion written all over his handsome face which only served to embarrass me all the more. Good Lord, was this man really going to make me give him a breakdown of big girl terminology?

"You know, I mean I'm not like my cousin or anything...,"

"You mean fat? Is that what big girls are saying these days? Fluffy?" Christian asked before he started laughing. I wanted to slap his goddamn face off!

My hands flew to my waist, I was quickly over being embarrassed he was fuckin' rude as hell!

"You know calling people fat is very rude!"

"I see that now. Y'all say fluffy. I'm sorry bae I don't know all the lingo. I'll get it straight but damn work with a nigga. Shit I don't care, or I wouldn't be standing here right? It ain't like you're the 500lb lady who can't get out her damn house! You got a few extra pounds on you but it ain't like you're outrageous or anything. Also calling someone fat ain't rude if it's true!"

"You know what? If this is the best you can do at an apology you can keep it." I stated loudly.

"Well I actually wasn't necessarily apologizing to you. I was more of trying to get an understanding of what I did to piss you off. Now that you've told me that in fact you were the only one making assumptions you damn sure ain't gettin' one. But just to clear the air, I wasn't referencing your weight in any way. You're not the type that usually turns my head, but you did turn it which is why I'm standing here talking to your crazy ass."

I was stumped. What did I say to that? Should I be offended or was that a compliment? It was a backhanded compliment for sure. I inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly trying to compose myself. This was all starting to feel like too much plus the scent of his cologne was wafting up to my nostrils and I had a weakness for a good smelling man. Christian was overwhelming me. It was something I hadn't felt in quite some time.

"So, what do you want from me Christian? I'll be the bigger person and apologize for my behavior Friday. Now what?"

"Well thank you. See we can get along if you just stop trippin'. I just wanna get to know you. I'm new in town, all I know is family so shit, the last thing I want to do is piss off the first pretty woman I meet. When are you off?"

"I'm the boss. I can be off whenever I want to be."

Christian broke into a grin.

"Damn. I like that boss shit. Well let me take you out to lunch sometime this week then. I have a lot of running around to do getting settled in but let's hang out. Grab something to eat. No pressure or anything. I need people to talk to other than my cousin around here."

Hmm, he sure went out of his way to make sure he said just friends, didn't he? Just as soon as that thought crossed my mind I chided myself for thinking there was anything wrong with that. This is exactly how women jump the gun and get caught up trying to rush things. What was wrong with just being casual? I couldn't deny the fact when we were alone at Brazos he was cool as hell. Why not? Granted I enjoyed my solitude, but male company would be nice sometimes as well. Even in a just friend capacity.

"Okay you're on. Put my number in your cell and call me. But keep in mind I don't do short notice. I have a business to run and I also take clients. My time is precious so if you make plans with me I expect you to keep them." I tartly responded as we traded cell-phones and entered each other's information.

* * * *

Two days later I was sitting across the table from Christian at Bayseas. I had a taste for seafood and even surprised myself by calling and inviting him to lunch. Bayseas was just a casual family style spot. No hardcore seafood dishes but it was tasty. They greeted everyone who walked through the door with a warm welcome and made you feel like family. The night before while I was home relaxing I'd decided to give him a call and extend an invitation. Our phone conversation flowed surprisingly well and reminded me of the laughs we had the first night we met at Brazos.

"Damn it smells good in here. Thanks for the invite." Christian said gazing up at me through his long, thick lashes that would make any woman jealous.

"Well I'm glad you could make it on such short notice. I don't usually do things like that but a client had to cancel so I decided to ask in case you were free."

"Not a problem. I don't start work until tomorrow. I've just been running around, getting unpacked all my stuff finally got here from Virginia, so that's kept me pretty busy the last few days. I'm glad I can stop living out of suitcases and shit. Plus, don't get me wrong, I love my family and appreciate their hospitality, but ain't nothing like having your own space. Know what I mean?" He said with a laugh.

"I damn sure do. I've only ever had one roommate in my life. My cousin Pooh and even though I love her to death, never again." I said shaking my head. We'd already placed our orders and were waiting on our food.

While waiting I asked about what he did for a living and found out he was a Physical Therapist and would be seeing patients at several of the local hospitals.

"Hmm, I can see that. I mean you're obviously into physical fitness." I said trailing off suddenly embarrassed. Damn can you make it any more obvious you're checking him out?

"I mean I do workout and all that, I actual have a personal training business on the side as well. At least I did back in Virginia. I hope to take on some clients here as soon as I check out the scene around here and see what's going on. You should check me out on YouTube. I have a pretty popular channel. I do videos, advise, meal plans and all that, but my work is more than that. If you don't use it, you lose it as they say. Plus, lots of things happen to people you know? Accident victims, people lose a limb and have to recover from that. All sorts of things. Remind me to give you a card later." Christian explained as the waitress was setting our order on the table.

"Well it sounds interesting. Give me some of your cards. A lot of women at the shop talk about getting in shape. You're free to leave some cards there is you want. I also have a bulletin board in the hall."

"Thanks I appreciate that. How long have you had your own shop? Damn this catfish is on point!" Christian said quickly taking a bite of a piping hot hush puppy.

I started to laugh.

"Slow down now, ain't nobody gonna take it from you."  
The next hour passed quickly with plenty of laughs and us learning more about each other. I was a little nervous about asking certain things because I didn't want to seem too nosy. I mean after all this was a casual lunch date. At the same time, hadn't he said I was attractive? I didn't want to not ask personal things and be left in the dark.

"So Christian, you didn't leave anyone special behind in Virginia?" I asked. Fuck it. Why beat around the bush?

Oh shit. Here this nigga goes wiping his damn brow!

"To be honest I did."

My heart sank to the tips of my toes. I fuckin' knew it! No wonder he was making it clear we were just going to be friends.

"I see. So how is that going to work? You being here in Texas now." I asked nosily.

Christian picked up his napkin and wiped his mouth. Look at his ass trying to think of a good lie, I thought leaning back in the booth and folding my arms across my chest looking at him. I was suddenly ready to go! This new "friend" had taken up enough of my time today.

"Honestly it was a hard decision to make leaving her. But things just weren't working out the way I wanted them to and the opportunity for work was too good for me to pass up. I can take care of her better out here than there. But I plan to fly her out here as much as I possibly can. She's going to have to come here initially because being new on the job it will be a while before I can leave to visit there but she's worth it so I'm going to make it work."

Damn! He's dead-ass serious about this woman too. Talking about he takes care of her and paying for flights back and forth. I can't knock that sista, this brotha is fine and taking care of business?

"Well I guess so. You have to do what you gotta do I guess." I replied curtly as I dug around in my purse to pull out a piece of gum and my wallet. UGH! Here I was treating this man to lunch and now I found out he got a whole other woman on the East Coast. Oh yeah, this nigga got over today but it will be the last time!

"You wanna see her?" Christian asked reaching for his back pocket and pulling out his wallet.

Dude are you really fucking serious? What do I need to see a picture of your woman for? It wasn't like I could say nigga not really, that would really make me sound like a salty bitch. Instead I pasted a fake ass smile on my face and took the wallet he'd shoved in my face.

Seconds later I knew my face was cracked and looking confused as I gazed at a picture of what looked to be about a three-year-old female version on him. A beautiful mocha skinned little girl with the two of the largest afro puffs I'd ever seen on each side of her head smiling in a yellow sun-dress.

"Uhhh huh! I know what you were sitting over there thinking." Christian said openly laughing at me.

"Well why didn't you just say you had a kid instead of making it sound like that?" I asked exasperated.

"I did answer you. Danielle if I was in a good relationship back in Virginia, that's where I would be. The only person I regret leaving behind is my baby girl Kiana. I wish I could have brought her with me but her mama ain't trying to hear that even though she likes being in the streets more than sitting her ass at home. Besides, I wanted to prove a point...you need to stop jumping to conclusions when it comes to me.

I could detect the tone of bitterness creeping into his voice concerning his baby mama, so I was not about to ask about anything that wasn't my business. I did like the fact he seemed to be an involved father.

"I'm sure you miss her...,"

"I do. But I can take care of her better here than there. Anyway, I'm done talking about her for now."

"Wait...you didn't tell me her name."

"Kiana, she just turned three. Okay what about you? All in my business. Where is your man at? Baby Daddy? How many kids you got?"

I busted out laughing. It took me a few seconds to get myself under control.

"First of all, I wasn't being that nosy. Second, I have none of thee above. I'm a woman all about making my money."

"Fuck all that. I'm about my money too but I still have needs. Everyone does. So, who you got taking care of yours? You may not have a man but somebody sliding through and handling your needs."

I was caught off guard with how ugh, how bold he was! I kinda liked it though.

"I feel what you're saying but I've been rolling solo for a while. Getting my business off the ground and I'm also trying to get a second location going. I'd rather not have the distraction."

"So, you trying to stay like that or what?"

"Oh my God. Christian are you always like this?"

"Like what? I said something wrong?"

I exhaled deeply.

"I mean no. Not really but you're kind of blunt. Brash."

"Brash? Baby I don't even know what you're talking about. I mean I went to college and everything, but I don't even talk like that. All I know is if I wanna know something I gotta ask right? For me it's like this, I spend all my time at working being politically correct and making proper conversation, making sure my patients are comfortable and at ease. Honestly, I don't have time for that in my personal life. I don't think I'm straight rude like you wanna make me seem. I just like to get to the point."

I didn't mean to make him feel bad or anything. Shit maybe I was so used to men lying, the very thing I wanted, an honest guy...or so it seemed was sitting right in front of me and I couldn't handle it. I wonder what happened with him and his baby mama? Truth be told, I wanted to be real nosy. But I knew it wasn't my place.

"Well to answer your question, I'm not going to say I like being single. But I do like my peace."

"A man can't bring you peace?"

"If one can I haven't met him yet. All I've had so far is confusion and someone trying to change me and make me feel like I'm not enough as I am."

"I see. Well I know you need to get back to work and everything." Christian hailed a waitress and asked for the check.

"Wait this is my treat. I invited you."

"Nah I got this."

Christian paid the check and walked me to my car. It was awkward for me to say the least. I mean what should I do? Shake his hand? Lean in for a hug? It had been so long since I'd been on anything resembling a date I had no idea what to do. Before I could drive myself crazy wondering, Christian had grabbed me into an embrace and planted a simple kiss on my cheek. I slowly exhaled, that was perfect I thought as he slowly released me.

"Do you mind if I call you later on tonight?"

"Not at all. I'd love to hear from you." I said. Christian was looking into my eyes and I was seriously melting inside. I felt giddy. Dang, I haven't felt like this in such a long time.

"Okay, I'll talk to you later. Thanks for lunch." I said quickly closing my car door. My hands were shaking so bad I thought I might hit the car next to me trying to back out. To make matters worse Christian was still standing there watching me! What the hell was he thinking?

Christian

My doorbell rang, and I looked up from the box I was unpacking in the kitchen. Who the hell is at my damn door? I don't even know anyone here, I thought placing the stack of dishes on the counter and making my way to the front door. As soon as I walked up I could see my cousin Mark peeking through the window on the side of the door. I'ma have to hurry up and cover these up, I thought frowning.

"Nigga you heard of calling first?" I said scowling as I opened up the door and let him in. I mean we were family, but I was funny about people just popping up at my spot unannounced. Granted Mark and I had kept in touch throughout the years, he'd even made two trips out to Virginia to see me, but I could already tell from his conversation since I'd been back, visiting and living around each other were totally different. For one, it didn't seem like he was even working. From talking to my Auntie this nigga was out here living pillar to post. Or laid up with this Pooh chick. Who didn't seem to have much going for herself either. The few times I'd been around her she spoke highly of Danielle, but it didn't seem like she was following in her cousin's footsteps at all. When I'd inquired as to what she did for a living in casual conversation, she claimed she was "finding herself" Huh? Where the fuck they do that at? I wasn't aware being lost and "finding yourself" paid any bills.

"Man, if you don't let me up in here! You see I brought you some house-warming beer." Mark said holding up some damn no-name beers I ain't never heard of before.

I cut my eyes at him.

"Whatever nigga come on in but you gotta leave in a little while. I start work in the morning. I'm just in here unpacking some of these damn boxes. My shit got delivered yesterday."

"I see! Damn cuz! I didn't know you was living like this." Mark said walking around the living-room. I'd rented a really nice house on the North-East side of town from a military family that had to go out of state. I'd really lucked up on the deal because they had a short time to find a tenant and I'd passed all their requirements as far as income and the credit and background check. Three-bedrooms, formal living-room, family room and two and a half bathrooms. I think the realtor said the house was less than three years old so in rental terms I was living in basically a brand-new house.

"Living like what? An adult?"

"I mean I thought you were going to be at Aunties for a while at least." He said twisting open a beer.

"Nah. Not me. I love my Mama to death but I gotta have my own spot. I need my own privacy. I'm a grown man and do grown man shit. I can't do all that in my Mama's house. Plus, I have Kiana, even though she doesn't live with me full-time I need her to feel comfortable when she is with me."

"Well damn cousin, how many bedrooms is this? Three? Maybe I can help you take some of the load off and move in here with you. I do need to get out of my Mama's house too."

"Oh, nah man. I don't do the roommate thing."

"What are you gonna do with all this extra room?"

"Live nigga! Didn't I just tell you my daughter needs a bedroom?"

"Well you still got an extra one...,"

"Not that it needs explaining but that's going to be my home office. I told you I do personal training. I'm going to get back into it here too. Man don't you have like three kids now? Last you told me some chick was having another baby. You need to have your own shit. Auntie stays in that apartment, where do your kids sleep when you have them...do you even get them?" I asked. I'd barely heard Mark mention his little boys since I'd been back.

"Man, times been rough for me out here. That was Pooh who was pregnant, but I hurried up and got the money together for her to handle that. Courtney would have killed me if I showed up with a new baby. I have a hard-enough time taking care of my sons. Truth be told, I was thinking about linking up with you and going out to Virginia to see what was poppin' out that way since you seem to be doing well. Then you called and said you were coming out this way."

I rubbed my hand over my head, for once trying to bite my tongue because even though this nigga was like a brother to me, he could get downright ignorant sometimes. Mark tried to make it seem like I had always lived on easy street with shit being handed to me which had never been the case. It was like he refused to acknowledge the work I put in to have the life I wanted. I went to college, he didn't it. I wasn't looking down on him for that because you didn't necessarily need a degree to make it. Years ago he'd said he was going to trade -school. I think he started but dropped out after the first semester. I also had always wanted to own my own business. Yeah, I did the personal training which surprisingly brought me in a good bit of side money, especially once I started posting on my social media sites. That was just one aspect of my business. I also wanted to branch off into my own mobile physical therapy sessions. I was still in the research phase of it but once I was well connected in the community I was going to make moves to bring it to fruition. Sadly, these were conversations I just couldn't have with my cousin because for whatever the reason, he wasn't motivated to do anything. If he actually had a true passion for doing something with his life, he'd yet to share it with me. I learned a long time ago you couldn't drag people up with you.

"You really don't want no roommate nigga?"

"Not at all. Shit if you wanna leave Aunties, why not move in with ol' girl? Pookie, Pooh, whatever that fucked up name she calls herself is." I said laughing and walking back into the kitchen. Mark popped his ass over when I was just making headway in the damn kitchen. I'd already cleaned it out really good, mopped and lined my cabinets to start putting my dishes up. He was just going to have to sit and watch me work. I was giving him two hours before I put his ass out!

Mark sucked his teeth loudly before taking a long swig of his beer.

"Man Pooh ain't about shit. If she had her own spot do you really think I'd still be at my Mom's? I love her, but you know she stay on my ass."

"What do you mean she ain't about shit? She ain't got no job either? Damn my nigga. What the fuck are you doing? The pussy must be A-1 to you and your dick must be the same for her since neither of y'all asses is bringing anything else to the fuckin' table. I hope she ain't the reason you left Courtney and your boys."

"Nigga you already know!" Mark said laughing as if I'd actually given him a compliment. He never answered my last question.

"I'm about to get my shit together though man. I just need to talk to my baby mama to see if she can hold off on putting the white man on me with this damn child support. I have two interviews set up for this week. I'm trying to get my shit together. And I'm thinking about dropping Pooh's sorry ass. A nigga out here struggling the last four months and she ain't helping none. Shit I drove her to an interview last week and she didn't get the job. Nigga you right! I need more than pussy. I need a woman who's going to be my backbone while I'm down and out. Thing is, Pooh ain't even gotta be out here struggling. It's that fat ass cousin of hers fault." Mark said finishing off his first beer and reaching for another.

"Man don't drink too many of those, you gotta drive home in a little bit."

"Damn nigga I'm good! I know my limit."

"So, what her cousin do?"

"Man, you seen the shit for yourself the other day. Danielle big ass over there making money hand over fist. Bitch gon' have the nerve to tell Pooh she had to let her go because it wasn't working out with her working over there. Shit they family. Pooh should have been able to go over there and just stand for eight hours and still get a check. You don't do family like that!"

"I wouldn't say that. Danielle is running a business and if you're not pulling your weight you gotta go. Family or not. So, we're going to have to agree to disagree on that shit." I called out over my shoulder as I slid the last of the glasses into place on the shelf.

"I even had Pooh go ask Danielle's big, nasty ass for a loan and she told her no. They supposed to be like sisters and she wouldn't even help her?"

"Well why the fuck should she? She must have known the money was for you. But anyway, that ain't none of my business, and Danielle's money ain't none of y'all business either if you wanna keep it one hundred. I saw her today matter of fact." I said casually.

"Who? Danielle?"

"Yeah. We met up over at that place Bayseas."

"Figures. Anything she does would involve food."

I stopped mid-air putting some plates in the cabinet and turned around. I wasn't one to go caping for women that didn't belong to me, but I did like to think of myself of having a certain level of decency towards people. I damn sure wasn't one of these brothas out here who allowed Black women to be drug through the mud for no good reason. Shit even if you thought you had a reason, keep that shit to your damn self. I was not with the blatant Black woman bashing that seemed to be so prevalent these days. Especially on social media. Don't get me wrong, if a woman regardless of color needed cussing out, I was more than capable of doing that. There just needed to be a justified reason for it. I cussed my baby mama out on the regular...always warranted. But one thing I would never do is drag her publicly or talk about her to other people. Our issues were between us.

"Mark why is every word out of your mouth concerning that woman is big this, fat that, bitch all that type shit. I'm pretty sure after all this time you know her name. Also, just to be very fuckin' clear Danielle may have some extra pounds on her, but she's one of the baddest I've seen since I hit San Antonio. Real talk my nigga. I'm pretty sure her weight ain't a problem for a lotta men, myself included. So, if you just can't handle what she got, that's on you my nigga. It ain't a problem for me and a lot of other men too. Also, unlike her cousin, who seem like all the fuck she got going for her is the fact she's thin, I mean if you consider that an asset...,"

"It is!" Mark yelped sounding indignant.

"How is it? I mean yeah, she's slim, but she ain't got no shape on her. At least not to me. I like a thicker more hour-glass shape which she definitely is not. Pooh kinda built up like Wendy Williams if you ask me. Ol' P body shaped ass. And she ain't got no place, or a job? Oh yeah, my man her cousin is winning in all areas of life if you ask me. You should have played your cards right and you would have had a woman that had ya' back! That backbone you're speaking of? Cousin Danielle got all that!"

"Whatever nigga! That big bitch can't do nothing for me but maybe cook me some food! I hope you ain't seriously thinking about messing with her rude ass. Shit what I don't like about her more than her just being a big sloppy bitch is the fact she's rude and think she knows everything. Danielle faking the funk in front of you because her ass probably wants some dick...nigga I hope you ain't seriously thinking about sliding your dick in-between all them folds! Shit Kiana's mama must have done a number on you! Got you lowering all your damn standards I see."

"You know what? Time for you to go! Take these cheap beers and get the fuck out my house." I said walking out of the kitchen after I bagged back up the rest of his measly six-pack. Nigga claim he brought them for a little house-warming present, but he was drinking them all himself!

"Here gon' home to ya' Mama's house."

"Damn nigga I was trying to sip with you. You can't seriously be thinking about fuckin' with Danielle. Watch ya' self cousin. I heard that big bitch was out there. Fuckin' everything moving on the Eastside."

"If she is that's her business."

"Well damn, call me when you get off tomorrow, so we can chill." Mark said trying to take one last sip of beer before I snatched it out of his hand and threw it in the trash.

"Nigga I don't chill after work. I get ready to go back in that muthafucka the next day like your ass should be doing. I chill on the weekends, so you might not even hear from me until Friday evening, if you hear from me then." I said before pushing his ass through the front door.

Damn! I just can't take too much ignorant talk. I can't lie though, he did raise a few questions for me about Danielle. It's not like I knew people in town who I could drop her name to and get a feel for her. So, I was just going to take her at her word that she was the woman she said she was and who she presented herself to be to me. Right now, on a scale of one to ten, ten being the highest level of crazy, Danielle was sitting at a solid three. I could handle a three.

Danielle

The rest of my day flew by after having lunch with Christian earlier today. Here it was almost nine and I was just walking through the door. Unlike other days, today I felt light on my feet and wasn't dragging at all. The minute I got back to the shop people started asking me where I'd been and why I was smiling so much. I hadn't even realized I was. The one thing I did notice was that I could still feel Christians soft full lips on my cheek. His hands on my back and I felt warm all over. Goodness, is this what the slightest bit of attention from a man did to me these days? Maybe I had been off the dating scene a little too long. I should start going out more, I thought to myself. Pooh was always trying to get me to go with her, but Pooh tended to want to frequent places I found to be a little low class. I mean every once in a while was okay, but I just felt like if an establishment couldn't afford a liquor license, I don't want to be there 24/7. Shit I could afford to buy myself a nice mixed drink if I wanted one. Shoot I may be a big girl, but yes... I will admit to being a little bad and bougie. I liked nice things and I wasn't ashamed of that.

No sooner had I reset my security alarm did my cell-phone ring. I pulled it quickly out of my purse and prayed the sudden pounding of my heart at seeing Christian's name flash across the screen didn't relay to my voice. I quickly tried to clear my throat before answering but mouth was suddenly desert dry.

I croaked out a hello as I made my way to the kitchen for a drink.

"Did I catch you at a bad time?"

"No. Not at all, I just walked through the door actually. I'm grabbing something to drink in the kitchen, how was your day?"

"It was good. I guess. I came home cleaned and started unpacking some of these boxes. Trying to get organized a little. I'm done for the night though, I just got out of the shower."

Oh Lord! Why did my mind immediately imagine this man butt naked? Or maybe he's laid back on the bed with a towel wrapped around his waist? Nope. No towel. Fuck a damn towel! Damn! It has obviously been way too long for me. I took a gulp of juice and ran my hand across my forehead. A bitch was over here sweating off imagination alone!

"So, my cousin was over here earlier."

"Umm. Okay." I answered dry as hell. I couldn't stand Mark's yellow ass.

"So, let me ask you something."

"Go ahead."

"Why doesn't my cousin like you?"

I paused before answering while I walked into my living-room and sank into my couch. I was a bit taken aback by the question. I wanted to say the real question is why I don't like your cousin, but I held my tongue.

"Christian you're going to have to ask your cousin that. There was a time I was nothing but nice to Mark. I actually knew him before Pooh. They met through me. So, you will have to ask Mark why he feels such animosity towards me. I can't answer that. At this point I just give as good as I get from him. But it's really getting old. I'm actually avoiding doing things with my favorite cousin because if he's there...and he usually is, I don't want to be anywhere around him. It's weird too because it's like he gets off on trying to embarrass me in front of people talking about my weight and shit like that. I'm over it." I said exhaling loudly.

"Okay."

"Okay? That's it?"

Christian started to laugh and damn if this man didn't sound sexy as hell.

"Yeah that's it. I had a question, I asked you about it. You answered me honestly didn't you?"

"Well yes...," I stammered.

"You sure? You don't sound sure now."

"I am!"

"Well, there's nothing more to say on the topic then. You made a little more sense than he did but as far as I'm concerned that negative shit is between y'all. As long as it doesn't interfere with anything we're trying to do that's all that matters right? Besides, I think your cousin is as much of an idiot as mine is, so we don't need them involved in our business at all. That whole double date shit didn't go too well so it's not like we need to revisit that do we?"

I burst out laughing.

"No, we don't. Leave my cousin alone Christian, she's just a little lost right now. She's going to find her way."

"Yeah right. With my cousin? The blind leading the fuckin' blind. Anyway, enough of them. So, when can I see you again? With me starting work tomorrow I can't really do the whole meeting up for lunch thing. I mean unless you wanna bring me lunch up to the hospital, or you could meet me up there and I can treat you to the best hospital food you ever had in your life. It's up you. But I mean you being a big-time boss and all, you can come and go as you please." Christian teased.

I don't know why but as good as he was making me feel with the conversation, I had a sudden bout of insecurity as well.

"Why me?"

"What do you mean? Why not you?"

"Christian come on. You know what I mean...,"

"Actually, I don't. Explain to me why you would ask me that."

"You're attractive, new to town, you're going to meet all types of women. Why are you wasting your time on me?"

"You know what? I think this discussion is one best had face to face. So I'ma ask you again, when can I see you? If you don't want to see me again Danielle, I'd prefer you just said that instead of all this extra dumb shit you just said."

I sat up straight on the couch at the harsh tone of his voice.

"I didn't mean to make you..., hold on, are you mad at me?"

"So, you don't wanna see me then? Since you're not answering the question. You have a good night Danielle."

Before my mind could register what had just happened, the call was disconnected, and I was sitting there staring at my phone dumbfounded. How had that conversation gone into left-field that quickly? Was I wrong to ask him that? I genuinely wanted to know. I'd been down this road before with guys acting like they were so attracted to me, the next thing you knew they were trying to change me. Get me to go on diets or inviting me to workout. If I wasn't really his type I just wanted to know.

I sat there for a few minutes trying to decipher exactly what the fuck just happened? What it that big of a deal? Why not just answer me? I sat there beating myself over the head for coming off as nothing more than an insecure fat girl. I guess the question I really wanted an answer to was Negro am I really your "type". I can't honestly say how I would have felt knowing that he was a straight up chubby-chaser, but I did want to know. I liked to think I was attractive enough to compete with any woman. Even if I wasn't your usual cup of tea I wanted to know you occasionally drank from a cup my size. Why didn't you think of this before? I thought picking up my cell-phone again and pulling up Instagram. I'm going to answer my own damn question. Damn, I hope he doesn't have one of those crazy IG names. I typed in Christian Lawrence and a whole slew of names came up. I began clicking on each profile looking for a picture of him. It took me several profiles but the last profile I clicked on had a picture of the little girl with the enormous afro-puffs he'd shown me earlier. Here his ass is, I thought gleefully and began to stroll and click on every picture being careful as hell not to double-tap shit. I wish they would make it to where you could turn that damn feature off. Christian had a ton of pictures on his Instagram! Three rows down I even saw that he'd taken a picture of the meal he'd ordered the day I met him and had tagged the restaurant in the pic. The caption read "A delicious dinner with a beautiful woman in my new city." I didn't even recall him snapping a picture but evidently, he did. I was cheesing hard as at what he'd said about me.

The smile didn't last long because as I got into some of his older posts I saw tons of pictures of him with different woman. Some slim, most thick and shapely. None of them were carrying the extra weight I had that was for damn sure. I also knew that the women were after his break-up with his baby mama because on a few of his pics he referenced dates and getting "back out there" I of course clicked over to their pages just to get a better look if their page wasn't private. This nigga must have women on Instagram sliding into his DM's 24/7! I went back on his page and continued to stalk it a little more. There wasn't any use in trying to sugar-coat what the hell I was doing. It was level 10 stalking behavior.

I paused on the picture of his little girl posing with a gorgeous sista. She was rocking a low haircut and you could see she had naturally curly hair, light-skin, green eyes and her body was bad as hell. She put me in the mind of Nicole Murphy. Basically, she was the opposite of me in every way fathomable. It was obvious I'd come to the timeframe in his stream where they were still together because there were loads of picture of them together and with their daughter. My heart felt heavy as hell. I put the phone down, I'd tortured myself enough for one night.

Then another thought crossed my mind.

If Christian did also date bigger woman, how come they hadn't made it to his Instagram page? Was he ashamed of them? This was something a lot of plus-sized women dealt with. Men wanting to date them behind closed doors. If this was how he did things, he definitely wasn't the man for me.

* * * *

The rest of my week crawled by at a snail's pace and for some reason the conversation with Christian and my own stalkerish behavior afterward left me in a sour mood. Now everyone in the damn shop was asking me what was wrong. "You were so happy a few days ago!" I wanted to tell everyone to shut the fuck up and do their damn jobs. All in my damn business and here it was the weekend and we were full to capacity. There wasn't an empty chair in the building.

I could admit I was snapping at folks a little more than usual, but it was because I hadn't heard from Christian since he hung up on me and I was berating myself for ever having asked him the what I now realized was an insecure question in the first place. I felt like an idiot. I didn't want to talk to Pooh about it because I didn't want her all in my business especially if there was a chance she'd open her mouth and say something to Mark's ass, but I was curious if she'd seen Christian. I also didn't want to talk to Pooh about it because if I told her what happened, it would open the door for yet another topic I didn't want to discuss with her. My weight. I'd spoken to her but refused to bring up his name and all she could talk about was the fact Mark's ass had finally gotten a job. I don't know what delusion Pooh was under, but I guess she felt like since he was starting a new job he was going to be her sole provider now. I quickly tuned all that talk out because I knew better. Granted Mark never kept a job but when he did have one Pooh was always left in the same position. Broke.

"Hello how you doing? Can I get in with the barber please?"

The second I heard the voice I knew it was him.

"Ouch!"

"I'm sorry Crystal, bend your head for me." I said absently, trying not to stare. Our eyes met for a second but Christian quickly looked away and took and stood to the side in the waiting room. Seconds later I saw him walk past me. Fuck me! I silently screamed. Was he really going to come in my shop and not speak to me? Really? Wow. I guess he is. Derrick had several customers to do before Christian walked in, so he was in for a wait. I finished up with the last customer I was going to do before taking a lunch break. I spent the entire time I was straightening up my work station seething. I was rubbing the counter hard as hell taking my frustrations out on the counter before I made the decision to speak to him first. I washed my hands and took a quick peek in the mirror before going to the waiting room. I knew my hair was in place because last night I'd stayed late and had Tasha one of my braiders do me an intricate cornrow style. It was cute, two French braids going back but each side was made of really small braids flowing into two larger braids. My makeup was on point and of course under my work smock I was cute and casual. I always made it a point to look good at work. I never wanted to be a stylist whose head was looking a hot mess because I was so busy making everyone else look good. Besides, I was an owner. I represented my shop at all times.

I looked over to the receptionist desk and saw her talking all animated on the phone. I quickly stepped over to the desk.

"Deja honey? I hope that's an appointment you're making and not a personal call. But it can't be business call if you're on your cell-phone, right?" I stated my voice sugary sweet. "I don't pay you to talk."

"Yes ma'am! That was my Mama asking me something really quick."  
I cut my eyes at her, my lips turned down. Lying ass. Deja had been yakking at least 15 minutes.

"I want you to offer the customers in the waiting room a beverage and then wipe down the display cases. We also have a new cosmetic display that needs to be set up. You can start on that during your down time."

"Yes Ms. Danielle."

Deja was one of my two little teenage girls I employed on the weekends since we were so busy. She was a good kid but every now and then I had to keep her on task. I took a deep breath and walked to the other waiting room. Look at this shit! There this man sat flanked by women on each side being the life of the fucking party. I cleared my throat loudly and all three of them stopped laughing long enough to pause and look up at me.

"Sorry to interrupt but Christian can I speak to you for a moment please."

"Yeah go ahead." He replied dryly.

"Privately if possible."

"Look I might be up next. I've been waiting long enough. I don't want to lose my place in line."

"I'll make sure you don't. I kinda have a little pull around here. Don't you worry about that." I said before walking out of the door and going over to let Derrick know Christian was in my office if he came up in the cue. Derrick said it would be at least another 30- 45 minutes before he got to him.

I turned around to find Christian standing there but didn't say anything, I just walked to my office because it was clear to me Christian intended to make this difficult for me. When we got to the door I ushered him inside and closed the door behind us.

Lord this man is so fine, I thought to myself. It wasn't like he was even dressed like anything today. It looked like he was on his way to workout, his hair didn't even look like it really needed to be cut yet but I knew from the occasions I'd seen him, he kept his hair tight.

"Did you ask me back here to ogle me? If that's all you wanted you could have sat your ass in the waiting room and looked right along with the rest of the women in the shop."

My jaw dropped! Why this arrogant sonofabitch! What was I doing thinking he ever deserved an apology? My jaw was moving but the words racing through my head refused to come out.

"Nothing to say? Man, I ain't got time for this shit." Christian spat as he made a move to open the door.

I finally snapped out of it and sprang in front of the door blocking his exit.

"Can you just wait a minute? I just, I mean, can you...,"

"Can I? No can you. Can you learn how to answer a simple ass question without asking me a dumb ass one in return? I asked you if you wanted to see me again the other night. You didn't have shit to say. Matter of fact I asked you twice. Your response was to ask me some dumb shit. So, it's clear to me you didn't want to. Why the fuck are you holding me hostage back here now Dani?"

"It's Danielle." I said quietly. Everything about this man was throwing me off.

"Dani, Danielle, Dingy. Who cares at this point." He said exhaling loudly standing back a little way to look at me.

"I do want to see you Christian." I said softly eyes on my feet. I felt so stupid I couldn't even bring myself to look at him.

"Can you please look at me when you're talking. What the fuck am I in the twilight zone or what? Look do you have some type of low self-esteem issues you're dealing with or what? I asked you the last time we found ourselves in your office, but I need to know now. Because if you do, baby I'm sorry for you but I just don't have time in my life for that right now."

"No! I don't."

"Are you sure because it seems like you do. Why would you ask me why you? Why not you? Unless I got it totally wrong the few times I've seen you, I thought you enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed yours so why not you? You're a beautiful one woman, you have to have some level of intelligence to run your own company and have employees, dress your ass off, hair always laid and my personal favorite, you always smell so damn good. So why ask me why you? It's a dumb fuckin' question to me."

"I asked because I'm big okay! I said it. Do you normally date big girls? I mean is that your thing? Because I don't want to start anything with no man who just has a big girl fetish. There I said it, because there are a lot of mean out here like that who think dating a big girl is going to be easy because she feels so lucky to have a man. I don't want a man like that. So I thought I was saving us both the trouble by just being straight up about the shit and just asking. That's all. Why me? It was a simple question to me. You're the one who had to blow it all up instead of just answering me." I answered hotly. I was not going to stand here and take his abuse any longer. Christian wasn't so fine he couldn't get cussed out too.

I was already leaning against the door but when Christian stepped forward and caged me in by placing his hands on each side of the door, my bodied stiffened and my breath hitched. This nigga wasn't crazy, was he? After all he was related to Mark. Christian leaned down until his forehead was pressed against mine.

"Baby come on now. Don't insult me like that. Do I come across like the kinda of man that preys on low self-esteem, overweight women? Is that how you see me? More to the point, is that how you see yourself? I'ma be honest with you. I'm 29 years old. I have absolutely no past experience in dating a larger sized woman, but I wouldn't say it's because I don't look at them. I've seen some bigger women I found to be attractive. But for the last six years I was in a relationship anyway, so it wasn't like I was out here looking at women like that, you know what I mean?"

I licked my lips and lowered eyes slightly. He was so close to me I could barely stand it.

"I mean are you questioning if I'm really attracted to you? I am. I really am."

Suddenly his nose was grazing the crook of my neck and my legs felt like jelly. Oh God.

"I don't know what the hell this perfume is you're wearing but it drives me crazy." He said before planting his lips on mine Our lips latched on to one another and we just fit. There was no first kiss awkwardness at all. His tongue grazed my lips and my mouth parted welcoming him inside. I wanted to suck this man's entire soul inside of me he tasted so good. His hands ran down my body caressing my breasts and rounded my back until his hands lowered and cupped my ass pulling me as close to him as possible. My panties were soaking wet and the hardness I felt pressed against my belly made me want to throw away any shred of dignity I had left at that moment and have this man take me right on my office desk. I knew for damn sure it was solid enough to hold the both of us. Handcrafted solid oak baby! I was willing to throw all that shit on the ground.

"Shit Dani." Christian hissed as he broke our kiss and buried his head in my neck. I caught the tail end of several other curse words, but I was too busy trying to control my own body. It had a will of its own right now and my nipples, one of my most sensitive spots were so hard they hurt. They needed attention bad. It hit me then just how long I'd deprived myself. Christian took my hand and pressed it to his groin. Dammit all to hell! I want all of this... right now.

"Damn Christian." I couldn't stop myself from moaning.

"Danielle, as we get to know each other, we might fuss about a lot of shit. Just please don't question if I'm genuinely attracted to you. I like your conversation, your whole vibe, that pretty smile. This ass, damn girl this ass got me like....," Christian took my hand that was still on his dick and placed it inside of his sweat pants and boxers ran it up and down the entire naked length of his hard dick several times. I ran my thumb over the huge head of his dick circling and smoothing it over with the pre-cum that was leaking from the tip, "... damn do you feel how you got me?"

"Okay now you're embarrassing me. Stop." I whispered.

"Nah ain't no embarrassing to this shit. Since you questioned me now I'ma make sure you always know. Look at this right here tho...," Christian said running his hands over my breasts and giving my nipples a gently graze. "I like this. But let me be good shit. You got me back here thinking about doing some things we don't even need to be thinking about right now."

There was a sudden loud bang at the door that caused me to jump.

"Tell Christian Derrick said he's ready for him. He's just stepping out to smoke real quick give him five minutes." Deja called through the door.

"You gon' have me walking out here looking crazy, shit." Christian said grabbing his still hard dick through his sweat pants.

"Look, there's a bathroom in here. And another thing. Don't come in my shop again acting like you're not speaking to me. I didn't like how it made me feel. Don't wear those damn gray sweat pants in here again either. You have way too much...meat to be walking around like that. Y'all niggas know what y'all be doing." I said cutting my eyes at him as I quickly adjusted my clothes. Christian started laughing as he went into the bathroom to get himself together.

When he walked back out, he seemed to have everything back in order.

"So, let me ask you one more time. When can I see you again?"

"Well I know you're probably busy, what about next weekend?"

Christian's head jerked back, and he scoffed.

"Damn you really ain't fucked up about seeing me are you? Next week huh? Well I guess if that's all I can get I have to take it."

"Whatever Christian. Stop acting like you really wanted to see me."

"There you go assuming shit again. There are barber shops all up and down this street. If I didn't want to see you, I damn sure would have went to one of them." Christian said winking at me on his way out the door. I went into the bathroom, washed my hands and sat down.

I sat there damn near squirming in my seat the next hour. I wanted to run out of my office to see what he was doing and what women were trying to talk to him, but I heated up the lunch I brought from home and willed myself to stay seated. An hour later I walked out for my next appointment and he was gone. Damn he could have at least come and said good-bye, I thought frowning. I flew through the next four heads I did with every single thought consumed by Christian. I could still feel his lips on my mouth, on my neck. I could still feel his pipe in my hand if you really want to know the truth. Why the hell did I say NEXT Saturday? What the hell was I thinking. Shit! My mind was all over the place by the time I was ready to leave. I needed a damn drink. I called Pooh to see if she wanted to go have a drink somewhere.

"Ummph! What got you wanting to leave the house all of a sudden? I usually have to beg you to go somewhere. And you're treating? You know damn well I ain't saying no! What time you want me to be ready shit? I need to get in the shower now."

"Okay decide where you wanna go eat. I'll pick you up about 8:30." I said before hanging up. Damn. Next Saturday couldn't come quick enough. How stupid would I look if I called him and said let's go this Saturday?

Christian

The entire time I sat in the barber's chair earlier I can't even lie. I was in my feelings. I felt like a sucka. Next Saturday? So, she wasn't pressed to kick it with me on no level. I get it, but I bet you that will be the last time I go running after her ass too. I felt like since the day I met this woman I was chasing after her. Enough was enough. Yeah, she had my interest, but a lot of other women could have it too. I ain't even gonna lie. I wasn't used to having to work this hard for a woman's attention. Besides, I was just recently getting back on the dating scene anyway. Samiya, Kiana's mother and I had been apart a little over a year now. One hellish year at that. I really didn't like people all in my business, but it was one of the reasons I'd decided to make this move back to Texas. As soon as I was done with the courts and had established all my visitation rights I was out.

Samiya was determined to make my life a living hell after we broke up. Even though she was the one I walked in on with another man in our home. Ain't no second chances on disrespect over this way. Which was yet another reason why I wasn't to down for all this chasing and whatnot. My cell-phone rang, and I saw my daughter's picture flash the screen bringing an immediate smile to my face. My baby was calling to face-time.

"Hey baby. What are you doing us? You should be asleep by now."

"Hi Daddy...,"

I was suddenly pulled out of my happy place. Samiya's ugly ass face popped on the screen. Now Samiya wasn't nowhere near ugly but I'd taken to calling her that due to her bad, ugly ass attitude. I no longer found anything attractive about this woman. We'd fallen out so bad Samiya couldn't even get my dick hard.

"What do you want Samiya? Is anything wrong with Kiana?"

"You know what Chris, I'm a little offended that you're always asking me that. Like I'm a negligent mother and you can't trust me to keep her safe."

"Well you have had a few questionable incidents and your judgment ain't always been the best. Starting with fucking up our family. Besides as of late, our communication ain't worth a damn so if you have anything to say to me concerning Kiana, I need you to email it to me so that I have it in writing."

I probably should have hung up the phone instead of taking it there with her again, but it always got to me when Samiya tried to act like she didn't know why I no longer wanted to be with her anymore. She was actually under the impression I should forgive her. Samiya swore up and down nothing happened with the guy but the simple fact he was in our home at all was enough. The nigga ran out before I could lay hands on his ass. I was ready to go to jail that night.

"So, I was calling because I wanted to know when you want me to bring Ki-Ki out to visit. You leaving has been really hard on her you know. She's used to being able to see her Daddy anytime she wants too."

"I don't plan on ever having you bring her out. I'll let you know when arrangements are made. Via email. You know damn well we can't just have a simple discussion no thanks to you. Plus, if I can't do it myself I'll have her fly out with my mom. She's still taking care of some things there, so she plans on making a few trips."

"Uh-uh nigga! If you think I'm letting my baby go to another state and I don't even know how you're out there living you are out of your mind! So if you don't want me out there you must not want to see your baby as much as you say you do." Samiya said hotly. I could see her pouting through the damn phone. On God she made me sick. Sometimes I couldn't believe I'd actually made a baby with this bitch, but Kiana was the light of my life.

"Okay bet. If that's how you want it to be fine. As long as you know you pay for your own ticket here and back. You need to find a hotel to stay in while you're here. Since that's the only place you're going to be. Not in my home sitting up under me... Do you have money for all that? Last I knew your ass wasn't even working just living off Ki's child support check. Also let me remind you of some shit. If you just plain want to be in the same city as Kiana, that's your damn business. But let's not forget, it ain't none of your fuckin' business where or how I'm living. We have joint custody. You talkin' like I have supervised visits with our child or some shit. You not running nothing but your mouth. We'll talk about this later. In email I'm busy. I'll call Ki tomorrow." I said before hanging up on her ass. I should have listened to my Mama six years ago when she said Samiya wasn't the girl for me, but I thought I knew it all and couldn't see past her bangin' body and pretty face. I was all in for more years than I wanted to admit to. As soon as I started to wise up to her selfish ways along came Kiana. I still loved her, but I felt kind of trapped at the same time.

If this man doesn't hurry his ass up. Mark had called me earlier and asked me to meet him over at some damn Mexican place called Chacho's. I didn't have anything else planned and it was Friday, so I figured why not? I needed to make some friends here quick. There was a knock on my window and there this fool stood grinning like the joker.

"Come on man, let me get in here and get some food, margaritas and check out these hoes!"

I just shook my head. This fool right here. But I was hungry, and this place was packed. It was a little confusing because it was huge, and music was playing. It had the vibe of a club, but it was a restaurant. There were even some families sitting around eating. Whatever, these Texans are on some different shit. We placed our orders, got our drinks and took a seat.

"Do you brothas mind if we sit next to you?"

I looked up to see two bad ass females standing next to us with their tray of drinks. A fine ass brown-skinned sista and her Mexican friend.

"You damn sure can!" Mark said jumping up from his chair and pulling out a chair for the Mexican chick to sit down. I cut my eyes at his ass real quick. Shit the least he could have done if he was going to be hopping up was made sure the sista sat first. I waved her on over to my side of the table to sit next to me.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Christian."

"I'm Nikki."

We all sat around having a good time talking. The ladies were actually pretty cool, and Mark seemed to be on his best behavior. I think he was in a good mood because he'd finally gotten another job at some warehouse. He claimed the pay was decent and he'd have full benefits in 90 days. It just goes to show he could talk all the shit he wanted but he knows damn well a grown ass man is supposed to work and handle his business. Mark had to be feeling good about himself right now. I just hoped he was able to hold on to the job.

"Well now that you're a Texan, Christian I do expect you to start following our NBA team you know. I have tickets to a Spurs game next Friday, you should let me know if you're interested. I'd love to show you a little southern hospitality."

"You know what Nikki, I just may take you up on that. We'll exchange numbers and talk about it later."

Come to find out Nikki was a nurse at the same hospital I'd just started working at. It kinda made me pause for a second because I damn sure didn't want to talk up a workplace stalker. Then I had to check myself. I'd just been saying I had to meet some more people around town and off the rip here I was turning a perfectly nice woman I'd just met into a stalker. Chill nigga!

"So where are y'all headed after you leave here?" Nikki asked, "We're hitting up club Atlantis, you and your cousin should follow us over there." She said smiling over at me.

Before I could form an answer, I heard a bunch of loud talk behind me.

"Pooh no! Stop! Just leave it alone and talk to him later. Don't do this in front of all these people. Please!"

I turned around to see Danielle struggling to hold her cousin Pooh back from barging over to the table. She was unsuccessful.

"Oh, I see how you do Mark. Nigga get a job and the first thing you can think to do is be all up under a Mexican bitch! All the time I been holding you down and putting some money in your pocket when I didn't even have it to give and this is how you do me?" Pooh screeched before reaching over and throwing the nearest margarita on the table in Mark's face. They began arguing back and forth. I didn't have shit to say. That nonsense didn't have shit to do with me but I can't even lie, Danielle with all her indecisiveness about even seeing me had me feeling stand-offish with her ass. I simply said hello and went back to my conversation with Nikki. We quickly exchanged numbers and I was out. I told Mark I was leaving especially when I saw security walking towards us. I definitely didn't have time for that and I reminded him he didn't either. Out in public arguing with a hood-rat when he just started a new job. No sooner than I'd reached my car I received a text message.

"Oh, you can't speak to me in front of your date I see." - Dani

I just shook my head, got in my car and left. I didn't even feel like the text deserved a response for the simple fact I had spoken to her. It wasn't even midnight and I was wide awake by the time I reached my house. I stripped down to my boxers and laid on the couch watching Netflix when my cell rang. Who the fuck is calling me? This better not be Nikki stalking already! It wasn't. It was Danielle.

"Hello."

"Oh, you can't answer my texts?"

"Are you drinking or what?'

"As I matter of fact I have been drinking... a little."

I threw my head back and groaned. Why me?

"Okay so what's up?"

"Why did you leave when I got there?"

"I didn't necessarily leave when you got there. It wasn't about you Danielle. I just didn't want to have anything to do with our cousin's drama. No more, no less. Did they end up getting kicked out?" I asked.

"No. They calmed down when security came over. Pooh ran that Mexican and your little friend off now they're over in a booth arguing of course. Hold on Christian."

I could hear her going back and forth with who I could only assume was her cousin.

"I'm back. Every time I come out with Pooh I remember why I try not to fuck with her ass. Now her and Mark booed up again and she wanna leave me to go off with him. I didn't really even want to come to Chachos ." Danielle pouted.

"Well you may need to sit your ass down because you sound tipsy as hell. You don't need to be driving in that condition."

"Christian take an Uber over here so you can drive me home. Please."

My eyes rolled to the back of my head. First you wanted to wait an entire week to lay eyes on my black ass again but now I can be all kinda damn chauffeurs? What kind of sucker did she really take me for?

"Nah. I ain't doing all that. Besides who's gonna drive me back home after I get you there?"

"Don't worry about all that. I'll pay for your Uber over here. You can either stay the night with me or I'll pay for your ride home. Come on. You're up anyway."

I sucked my teeth loudly.

"Maaaannn I'll throw my clothes on. Send the damn Uber, I'm texting you my address now!" I said raising up from the couch before I ended the call. I sent Danielle my address and threw my clothes back on. I cussed my own self out the entire time I was waiting. What in the hell am I doing?

Danielle

During the ride to my house I couldn't help sneaking a million glances at Christian. He was trying to act like he was really put off, but he wouldn't have come if he didn't want to.

"Is this you right here?" Christian asked easing the car up to my small circular driveway. I hit the garage door opener.

"Pull in. I never sit my car outside." I said suddenly nervous. Did I really just invite this man into my personal space?

I walked throughout the house clicking on the lights.

"So, it's just you living here? Your place is nice but it's big for just you isn't it?"

"Not really. I mean yeah, it's just me but I bought the house I could afford. I might as well be comfortable."

"I feel you. Damn where do I sit? You got it damn near like a museum up in here. I'm scared to sit down!" Christian said laughing.

"Whatever. Come on, my family room is actually upstairs. I appreciate you doing this for me. Are you staying the night, or will you be leaving?"

Christian stopped mid-step and stared at me for a few seconds before answering.

"You can run me to the house in the morning. Just don't be trying to touch all on me while I'm sleep."

My eyes bucked.

"Boy bye! There are two extra bedrooms in this house I won't be anywhere near you. If anything, don't be trying to touch on me!"

"Extra rooms? I'm sleeping in the bed with you. I don't know this house or this neighborhood. Anybody could try to run up in here. As shady as you act, a whole other nigga might run up in here trying to kill me behind your ass. Your ass is gonna be right there with me." Christian said laughing at me as we reached the top of the stairs. He'd already kicked his shoes off and was pulling his shirt over his head. I almost lost my shit right on the spot when he went for his belt buckle.

"Excuse me what are you doing?" I asked panicking.

"Getting comfortable. Where is your room at? It may take me a minute to fall asleep, but those drinks are getting to me now. We can watch a little T.V. before we fall asleep." Christian was popping his head into various rooms I guess until he found the master bedroom. Before I could say a word of protest Christian had walked in my bedroom and headed straight to my bed.

"I really don't understand why you women always have a hundred damn throw pillows! It takes ten minutes just to be able to pull the damn covers back. Where do you throw these? On the floor?" He said holding up a pillow in each hand.

I decided not to even make a fuss.

"Just toss them in the corner over there. They look cute on the bed Christian."

"I know but God Bless, is that what the bed for?" He grumbled as he tossed all the pillows to the side counting them as he did. "This don't make no damn sense. 16 little ass pillows on the bed."

I'd already decided to leave him alone. Christian wasn't running shit but his mouth. I'd walked into my private bathroom to wash off my makeup and brush my teeth. I heard the T.V come on and laughed. This man was really making himself comfortable! What should I wear to bed? It had been so long since I'd had a man in my home, let alone bed, I didn't know how to act. Especially since it's not like we're dating or having sex. Christian gave zero fucks and had already stripped down to his boxers. Not a shy bone in his body. I walked back into my room and shuffled around in my drawers looking for something to throw on.

"What in the world is taking you so long to get in the damn bed?"

I immediately cut my eyes over at him.

"Nothing, I'm just trying to find something to wear, since you're here and everything." I slightly stammered.

"Danielle, what do you usually wear to bed?"

"Nothing usually. I sleep naked."

I saw a sneaky look pass over his face before he busted out laughing.

"Well shit, far be it for me to change your habits just because I'm here. Sleep how you normally sleep. Strip!" Christian coaxed patting the empty side of the bed.

"You're a mess. I am not about to sleep in the bed naked with you. You're lucky I'm letting you in here at all. And you need to move to the other side because you're in my spot."

I wasn't going to sleep naked but damn near. I went into my workout drawer and pulled out a racer-back t-shirt. That and my panties would have to do. I did have lingerie to wear but I thought if I pulled one of those out it would definitely be sending the wrong message. I was obsessed with bathrobes but I wasn't going to sleep in one. I turned to go back into the bathroom.

"Uh-huh. Stop right there. You done took like twenty minutes with all that beating around the bush shit. Put that shit on right here and get in the bed."

Oh My God! I felt nervous as hell but something in Christians tone suddenly made me feel brave. I got the distinct feeling he was challenging me more than anything. Trying to punk me in my own damn house. It was time for me to let his ass know he did not intimidate me in the least. I mean he really did, but his cocky ass didn't need to know that. What do I have to lose? Not a damn thing. But I hope he doesn't think he's getting any ass tonight because it's a hard no for me, I thought to myself. I turned around and pulled my shirt over my head, took off my bra and quickly pulled the t-shirt over my head. I unbuttoned my jeans and did a little shimmy dance to get them down from my round ass. I could feel his eyes pinned on me and my cheeks heated.

Christian

Damn! I should have kept my mouth closed when Danielle started to make her way to the bathroom, but I wanted her to get over the shy girl act. The few little spats we'd had so far all seemed to revolve around her weight. Though she tried to portray a tough-girl act when it came right down to it, I could sense a little insecurity on her part. She didn't have to feel that way, at least not around me. I was attracted to Danielle in every way. Well expect that nasty ass attitude that popped out every now and then, but I thought she was pretty as hell. She was a 10 in my eyes. Shit the way my dick was starting to rock up underneath these covers her ass might be a 13!

My hand gravitated towards my dick to adjust it real fast and I felt Danielle quickly slip under the covers.

"Where is your head-rag at?" I asked

"Excuse me? What just because I'm a Black woman I have to be getting in the bed with a rag on my head? What exactly are you trying to insinuate Christian?" Danielle spat twisting in the bed to stare at me through narrowed eyes with her arms folding defiantly across her chest.

Really Danielle? I took a moment to compose myself because here I was out of my element, over on the North-West side of town and it took us damn near 45 minutes just to get to this muthafucka. I know one thing, her ass bet not ever ask me to do shit for her ass again. What the fuck did I say this time? Even White men out here laid up with sisters know Black women tie their damn hair up at night with a silk scarf. Danielle is a damn hairdresser and salon owner but I'm outta line? As much as it was killing me to do so I decided not to even answer her ass. Instead I put on a show of fluffing up the pillows, turned around and gave her my damn back.

The air conditioner was kicking, and she had the ceiling fans going so shit, I was chilly. I snatched her damn comforter over my body too! Ungrateful ass.

"Oh, you're just going to ignore me? I mean I just think it's rude of you to ask me that."

"Go to sleep Danielle, ain't nobody trying to argue with your ass."

"I'm not either. Just answer me."

"Why the fuck would I answer that dumb ass question?" I answered flipping over on my back and throwing my hands up.

"Oh, so now I'm dumb?"

"Ain't nobody dumb but if you really wanna know the truth you're asking some dumb ass question." I raised all the way up in the bed and turned to face her. Goddamn! Here I was trying to have a chill, relaxing night but she wanna see me act a fool evidently.

"Dani., I see you just got ya' little braided style done cuz it wasn't like this last week when I saw your ass. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't wrap that shit up with a silk scarf every damn night. Gon' head Let me see how fast your ass is gonna lie."

"I do but still...you didn't have to bring it up. Like I'm walking around looking like Aunt Jemima or something." Danielle replied pouting, lips stuck out because she knew she was dead as wrong trying to argue with me about nothing.

"I never said shit about you looking like the pancake lady. All I wanted you to do was feel comfortable in your own home. Shit just because I'm here ain't no reason to fuck up your fly style. I thought I was being cool about the shit. Trying to let you know it didn't matter to me if you put it on. Instead you felt the need to attack me for whatever the reason. I'm kinda digging you but I promise you I ain't with the shits. I've been there and done that. So, if this is what you do for the sake of doing it. I don't want no parts of it baby. Now I'm already in this bed, I left my home to come help you out in a bind and I'm a guest. This is my first time in your home and I feel like I'm being treated shabby as hell! So why don't you go to the guest room and at least let me get a good night's sleep?"

Danielle's mouth was hanging open, but I was dead serious. Leave me alone!

Danielle

Oh My God. Did this man really just ask me to sleep in the guest room of my own home? Now I realized full well how dumb I just sounded about the whole head scarf but Negro really?

I was shocked. But if I really kept it one hundred, I felt like busting out laughing.

"So, you ain't with the shits huh?"

"Absolutely not. Now are you getting in this bed and shutting your mouth or going in that guest room? I wanted to watch a show, maybe talk a little bit before we fell asleep, but you got my mood all outta wack. Not in a good way either."

My cell-phone rang causing my shoulders to jump. Who the hell is calling me this time of morning? No body but Pooh I'll bet. I reached for the phone and sure enough it was her.

"Hey Pooh."

"Ugh! If you're gonna be yakking with your cousin, you really need to take your ass to the guest room." Christian said sucking his teeth loudly and turning his back on me again. I was really going to have to put my foot in his ass!

"Who is that I hear in the background? Girl you have a nigga over there? You didn't even tell me you were dealing with anyone!"

"It's just Christian."

The line went quiet.

"You mean to tell me you're laid up in the bed with Mark's fine ass cousin?"

"Believe me it's not how it sounds."

"Sound like ol' boy is laid up under you is what it sounds like to me. You sneaky freak! Trying to act like you're Ms. Goody -Two Shoes in my face and busting it wide open behind my back. Mark told me he heard you was an undercover freak."

The mere mention of Mark opening up his mouth to say anything about me set me off.

"The only pussy Mark need be worried about is where the fuck yours been. What are you calling me for anyway?"

"Anyway...," Pooh drawled, "...girl why have I just been outside my mama's house fussing with Mark? Why this nigga don't wanna do right by me Dani? I do everything for this man. I cook, clean, fuck this nigga any way he wanna be fucked. I've even done threesomes with him because he wanted me to! Why won't he do right by me?"

My lips were turned down at this point.

"Pooh please tell me you ain't over there licking pussy just because this man wants you to do it?"

All of a sudden, I felt Christian pushing me closer to the edge of the bed.

"You really gon' have to get out of here with all that talk!" Christian mumbled placing a pillow over his head.

"Be quiet and go to sleep." I said pushing him back.

I did end up leaving the bedroom and walking out to the family room to continue to let Pooh talk my ear off about her sorry man. Why I subjected myself to it at all was beyond me. I didn't give a damn about her relationship and it was hard for me to be sympathetic about her situation because she was allowing herself to be treated this way. I definitely understood getting caught up and feelings becoming involved but it's not as if Mark had really switched up on her. He'd always been an asshole. I was pretty positive he would continue to be one.

A good thirty minutes passed with Pooh droning on about this wack ass relationship of hers before the lights in the family room came on momentarily blinding me.

"Hang up on her goddamn ass! If your cousin can't talk to her man about her issue with him at this time of night she doesn't need to call herself having a man." Christian seethed.

"What did Chris say?" Pooh asked nosily.

"Girl look I can't really talk right now. Let me call you in the morning. I might be late going into the shop. I haven't really decided yet." I said hurriedly as I got off the phone.
