r/AskReddit: [Serious] Autistic people of
Reddit, what do you wish more people knew
about Autism?
Something I wish my teachers knew when i was
growing up; me avoiding eye contact doesn't
mean I did whatever they accused me of, nor
does it mean I don't feel sorry, and it's
certainly not meant to be disrespectful.
It's just that I don't do well with eye contact.
Also; I know my social skills aren't the best,
and I do try to work on them.
But not telling me when I do something wrong
and thinking the mere fact you're upset with
me should lead me to realize what I did wrong
and how to do it better instead of just telling
me isn't ducking helping.
Every case is different, you cant just assume
it's the same with every person.
It feel like everyone thinks people like us
are just all socially awkward, but it can
be a lot more then that
For example I have quite mild aspergers syndrome
and to most people I seem like everyone else,
but I've met people with more severe cases
that cant even speak and need constant help.
Never assume every person with autism is the
same.
I wish people knew how much different autism
is on girls.
Researches on this topic are just beginning
to be made.
I'm not from the US, and in my country there
isn't any research being done nor available
in our language (so far I've only found resources
in English), so there is A LOT of misinformation
even between psychologists and other professionals.
I wish more people understood how terrified
I (and possibly others) are that it will bar
us from jobs, opportunities and relationships
- a normal life - because other people see
us as lesser, as difficult/not worth managing
or as broken.
I feel like things are often harder just because
people view me that way; it perpetuates itself.
We don't "look autistic."
And telling us that is not a compliment.
A lot of people with autism show no outward
signs of it.
One of your friends, coworkers etc. could
be autistic and you’d never notice anything
strange about them.
Maybe they’re a bit shy or awkward in certain
settings (in my case group conversations),
but nothing major.
For those people autism isn’t necessarily
a disability.
As such, there would be no reason to treat
them any differently than others even when
you do find out they are on the spectrum.
As a general rule of thumb, don’t assume
anything about an autistic person.
Find out what they’re like and respond appropriately,
don’t assume they have the same strengths/struggles
as your autistic nephew or an autistic celebrity
or whatever.
Laughing at me when I’m expressing happiness
instantly makes me unhappy.
Autistic kids grow into autistic adults.
Just because we get better at not showing
out autism doesn't mean we've "grown out of
it", as many people think.
It just means we've been forced to hide part
of ourselves to fit in and oftentimes it comes
at the cost of being able to fulfill all of
our needs, or hell, even just being ourselves.
edit: I don't want to do the typical thing
and be like "Thanks for karma!" so I figure
I ought to share some helpful resources.
The Aspergian is a really great website written
by aspies and other neurodivergent folk for
aspies and other types of NDness.
They have a lot of stuff relating to issues
dealt with when you're on the spectrum as
an adult in regards to symptoms, interaction,
relationships, etc.
And they also promote autistic artists as
well.
And Special Books By Special Kids is a really
good channel with interviews with people of
all abilities, including things like autism,
ADHD, etc, as well as physical stuff too.
It's a pretty great way to learn more about
other people and how they want to be treated.
As well as how they live their lives.
We have feelings, we have empathy.
‘You don’t look autistic’ is not a compliment.
Telling us ‘everyone is a little autistic’
doesn’t help.
It's kind of hard depending where an autistic
person is on the spectrum.
So for example, if you encounter an autistic
person that has problems with socializing,
don't consider them as this antisocial person
who wants to be left alone.
Because they probably might want people to
hang out with, they're just too shy when it
comes to asking.
Just because I can act "normal" a lot of the
time does not mean that my autism doesn't
affect me.
The majority of my time spent with others
is literally an act, and it's extremely mentally
exhausting and emotionally draining to the
point that I have frequent meltdowns when
I'm finally alone and able to be myself again.
This world wasn't made for me or people like
me.
When I work in customer service my bosses
think I'm the perfect employee.
I'm genuinely nice, always doing my best,
a quick worker...
They don't realize I had multiple panic attacks
before work and that when I get off I'm so
drained I go home and cry.
It's so hard to keep up the act of being a
"normal" human to the point that I don't know
how much longer I can do this.
99% of "representations" are absolute bullsheet.
If you really want to know how to deal with
an autistic person, ask the autistic person.
It's so easy.
We are as diverse as neurotypicals, but simply
our thinking pattern is bit different.
You don't recognize us on streets because
autism doesn't effect our looks, you notice
it once you start interacting with us, just
like you wouldn't recognize a left-handed
person until they start writing or doing other
activities with their hand.
Edit: something I want to add after reading
a question about "isn't autism by definition
not-normal" I replied to the person with this:
"The word "autism" comes from the Greek word
"autos," which means "self."
It describes conditions in which a person
is removed from social interaction.
In other words, he becomes an “isolated
self.”
" - WebMD website
Its actually something I wanted to add to
my original comment is that people say "we
struggle socially" but no, we are fine being
alone and lesser social.
What we really struggle with are overstimilations
which are the causes for our meltdowns.
autism speaks are the PETA of autism. and
they spread a lot of lies about autism because
those lies create fear and that fear earns
them money.
I wish people would understand that being
Autistic does not mean we are stupid.
It's very frustrating to be treated as a being
of lesser intelligence just because we think
and maybe act slightly different than someone
without Autism.
It is highly annoying when people think that
we are stupid and incapable of using logic
and common sense.
It's also difficult for a lot of us to read
body language and understand tones of voice
and facial expressions.
I wish I didn't have to explain this as much
as I do, it's very tiring.
We’re not emotionless drones.
If anything, we feel more emotion than the
average person.
Depending on the person, that will be shown
more or less.
Autism is a spectrum disorder and can be different
for everyone.
I’m fine with the internet generalizing
this, I do it often too.
Some people might not be fine with it, and
that’s okay.
Acceptance is what
we
really want.
