>> IN A RAMBLING ONE-HOUR PHONE
CALL TO "FOX & FRIENDS,"
PRESIDENT TRUMP DEFENDED HIMSELF
IN THE IMPEACHMENT HEARING AND■
CONTINUED TO SPREAD UKRAINE
CONSPIRACY THEORIES.
>> THAT WASN'T THE ONLY MORNING
SHOW TRUMP CALLED IN TO.
♪
>> HELLO, I'M BILL FLATEARTH.
WELCOME TO "CONSPIRACY TODAY."
TODAY ON "TODAY," THE CALL LINE
IS OPEN, WE'LL DISCUSS WHATEVER
IS ON YOUR MIND.
IS BIG FOOT JUST A WEREWOLF IN
CLOWN SHOES?
AND WHO GOT MY HAND STUCK IN
THIS STARBUCKS TIP JAR?
( RINGING )
GO AHEAD CALLER, YOU'RE ON
"CONSPIRACY TODAY."
>> GOOD MORNING.
OH, FRIEND OF THE SHOW!
PRESIDENT TRUMP!
WHAT CONSPIRACY ARE WE
DISCUSSING TODAY, SIR?
>> PERHAPS THE BIGGEST SCANDAL
IN THE HISTORY OF OUR COUNTRY.
>> DID THE GREY ALIEN INTRODUCE
GO-GURT TECHNOLOGY TO PREPARE
OUR CHILDREN FOR EVENTUAL TUBE
FEEDING ON THE CLONE FARM?
>> THEY HAVE THE SERVER.
?
WHO ARE THEY?
AND WHAT IS THEIR RELATIONSHIP
TO THEM?
>> CrowdStrike OR WHATEVER
IT'S CALLED, WHICH IS A COMPANY
OWNED BY A VERY WEALTHY
UKRAINIAN, AND I STILL WANT TO
SEE THAT SERVER.
>> AH, YES, THE SERVER.
WAIT... HASN'T THAT ONE BEEN
DEBUNKED?
FIONA HILL'S TESTIMONY WAS
FAIRLY COMPELLING.
>> WHY DID THEY GIVE IT TO A
UKRAINIAN COMPANY?
>> IT'S AN AMERICAN COMPANY, AND
THEY DIDN'T GIVE IT TO THEM.
>> I THINK THIS GOES TO THE
HIGHEST LEVEL.
>> OH, IT GOES TO THE HIGHEST
LEVEL.
WAIT, ISN'T THAT YOU?
>> I WANT TO SEE ADAM SCHIFF
TESTIFY ABOUT THE WHISTLEBLOWER.
>> OKAY.  I'VE GOT A CHUPACABRA
ON LINE TWO.
GOTTA GO.
LET'S MOVE ON TO SOMETHING MORE
BELIEVABLE.
WHY DID THE TRI-LATERAL
COMMISSION RELEASE CHEMTRAILS TO
MAKE ME GAIN WEIGHT IN MY
'50s?
♪
>> Announcer: IT'S "THE LATE
SHOW" WITH STEPHEN COLBERT.
