So you're having some difficulty
catching THIS FUCKER
because his bitch ass won't stop
running away,
even if he's SLEEPING?
You know what you need?
You need a MOTHERFUCKING GALLADE
And hold onto your dicks because
this ain't just any Gallade,
If you wanna catch roaming
legendaries
you need to learn some BREEDING.
First thing you need is a Gardevoir.
So go catch yourself a
motherfucking Gardevoir,
or Ralts/Kirlia fucking whatever.
What's important is that she is going to
be FUCKED by this guy:
So catch yourself a Haunter as well.
That's right, it's basically just some fucking
Pokemon fanfic.
But we're not just making them fuck so we
can fap to it. This is serious shit.
Make sure the Haunter/Gastly is MALE, and
the Gardevoir is FEMALE.
This is important for non-sexy reasons:
At level 8 Gastly learns a move called
Mean Look.
Breeding him with a Gardevoir means his babies
will know Mean Look too.
You use Mean Look on a roaming legendary, and
HIS BITCH ASS AIN'T GOING NOWHERE.
If your Haunter doesn't know Mean Look,
realearn it at the Move Realerner.
Anyways, throw these two in the Daycare with
each other,
and they will start FUCKING within minutes.
The old pedophile that runs the Daycare will
give you an egg.
Inside that egg is an extremely dope Gallade
that will hunt down and capture for you
all the pokemans you could ever want.
Unfortunely, when he hatches, he will look
like this little turd over here:
IMPORTANT: If your Ralts isn't male,
THROW IT IN THE BABY PIT LIKE A DEFORMED
SPARTAN BABY.
ONLY MALES CAN BECOME GALLADES.
Okay trainer, now you've got some level grinding
ahead of you.
The next important move your Gallade needs
to learn is Hypnosis.
If you think paralyzing a pokemon is a
good way to catch it,
you need to learn your shit, because sleep is
TWICE as effective as paralysis.
At level 20, Ralts will evolve into Kirlia.
Congrats now you have a gay ass balerina.
At level 30, Kirlia will try to evolve
into Gardevoir.
DO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN.
PRESS B ON THAT SHIT.
Keep grinding until level 42, at which point
Kirlia will learn Hypnosis. AWESOME.
Now give that bitch a shiny stone.
What!? Kirlia is evolving!
Congratulations trainer. You're moments away
from the Gallade of your dreams.
Grind that motherfucker to level 50, he'll learn
False Swipe, his third important move.
The last move is up to you, but it's a good idea
to give him Taunt,
So he can shut down assholes trying to use Roar
or recover health.
Congratulations, trainer. You are now the proud
owner of the ultimate catching tool!
So go catch some shit.
P.S. Gallade is, so far, the only pokemon that 
can learn all four of these moves.
If you even say Smeargle I swear to God I will
cover you in butter and rape you to death.
