(clapping)
- Thank you, thank you.
We're all familiar with
Howard Hughes, I'm sure.
He's been in the news again,
he's running around the country.
His mother and I
are worried sick.
No, because I'm not his father.
Howard Hughes, I think
the most exciting thing
he has ever done was in 1966,
and this was right after
he moved to Las Vegas.
He made, in one morning, the
largest single transaction
in the history of the
New York Stock Exchange.
He sold TWA, he owned it,
he owns 6,800,000 shares of it,
and they were going to take
him to court or something
and he didn't want to be seen.
So he picked up the
phone and sold it,
and I think after
taxes he received
something like $387 million.
And then he watched The
Who, What and Where Game.
I don't know what he
did the rest of the day.
Well, I was thinking Howard
Hughes has been known to do
some very strange things.
What if he, just
to have some fun,
decided to make this
transaction with the smallest,
dumpiest little stock
brokerage house in the country
and the smallest, dumpiest
little stock broker
just to see how that
man's morning might go?
I'd like to take you
right now to that company.
(phone ringing)
Is that the phone?
Oh, yeah, that's what
that little light is.
Morning, Crown, Craig and Fritz.
Long distance?
Is it paid for?
All right, fine, I'll accept it.
Morning, yes this he.
You'd like to make
a transaction?
Fine, fine, you have
an account here?
All right, well we'll just
have to open up a new one,
and then we can go ahead
and do some business.
Could I have your
your last name?
Huge, Hughes.
Want to spell that out for me?
H-U-G-H-E-S.
Fine, let me put a comma
so I know it's over.
All right, first name?
Howard?
Just go ahead and spell it.
H-O-W-A-R-D.
Your friends call your Howie?
(laughing)
Mr. Hughes, all right, fine.
(laughing)
I'll make a note of that.
Where do you live, Mr. Hughes?
The desert,
in hotel?
You live in a hotel?
(laughing)
Every day, every week,
every year, you live there?
Well, I stayed in one
once, I never lived there.
That's exciting, does a
maid come up every day.
You eat in your
room and everything.
Well, isn't that exciting?
A guy's living in a hotel.
Well, where is this hotel?
Las Vegas...
Nevada.
You live in a
hotel in Las Vegas!
Boy, oh boy, you gamble?
(laughing)
Got to watch your step,
a friend of mine went
out there Christmas,
almost lost his shirt.
Alright, just some friendly
advice, do what you want.
Alright, the account's
as good as open.
What do you want to do?
You want to buy
or sell or trade?
You want to sell
your shares of TWA.
Oh yes, that Travelers
Western Trans World Airlines.
Oh, an airline!
We like the airline here
at Crown, Craig and Fritz.
Good stock!
Fine, I'll look that up for
you, where would I find it?
It's on the big board,
which one's that?
(laughing)
New York!
Oh, sure, I know, I just
know a lot of the slang.
Let me look it up here for you.
Yes, just minute.
(papers shuffling)
It's gonna rain.
(laughing)
Here we are!
T-T...
86, Mr. Hughes, $86 a share!
Well, that's exciting!
Every share you have,
you're gonna get $86!
What a good day to do
some business, $86!
Well, well, all right, fine.
How many of your shares
you want to sell?
All of them?
You want to let all your shares
go when the stock's at 86?
Well, that's pretty stupid.
You hold on to five or
10, if it zooms up to 90,
that's 50 bucks thrown
down the drain, you know?
Alright just don't call
me back tomorrow and say,
"Phil, you didn't
tell me," that's all.
You're the boss.
How many shares do you have?
(laughing)
(phone clatters)
Oh, my God.
(gasps)
It's Howard Hughes.
(laughing)
It's the man with all the tools.
(laughing)
I didn't recognize his voice!
How could I?
I've never spoken to him.
Oh my goodness, Howard Hughes.
Oh, I hope I wasn't rude.
Oh my goodness, I
want to be killed.
Mr. Hughes, I hope I
wasn't rude to you.
I'm probably rude right now,
I'm talking into my hand.
(laughing)
The phone's on the floor,
and the millionaire's
on the floor.
I'm coming, oh my
goodness gracious.
Hi, I didn't recognize
your face, I never saw you.
Okay, let me mark this
down 6 millionaire,
six millionaire.
No, it's not an alarm,
I just can't say it.
Six millionaire,
well, I can write it.
Six millionaire shares.
Fine, now as your
broker, what do I do?
I don't know.
(laughing)
Multiply that times 86?
All right, fine.
Let me let me put down
the phone, all right?
Hold on a second.
6 million times 86.
Six and six is 12, 12 and
12 are 24, and 24 and 48.
I'm just adding that has
nothing to do with anything.
(laughing)
Two times two is four,
four times four is eight.
I'm multiplying, I don't
know what I'm doing.
I'm not gonna be
able to do that.
You're an honest
man, I'll trust you.
What does it come to?
(laughing)
That's a lot of money.
300 and, oh!
Let me write it down three...
Now I'll send that
into New York,
and they'll send me back
a check here for three...
Fine, I don't think I
have to mail that to ya,
my family and I can
move into the hotel,
it's not inconvenient.
All right, I'll drop
it in the mail, fine.
Well, thank you so
much for calling,
it's such a good day to do...
Oh, oh, you know, Mr. Hughes,
we do have a policy here
at Crown, Craig and Fritz.
Any 100 shares traded
in any one day you get
a pen and pencil
set you might be...
You can get an awful
lot of them, you know?
All right, I'll keep 'em.
I don't know what I'll
do with all of 'em,
but I'm not going
to do that with 'em.
(laughing)
I'll just keep them.
Thank you very much.
(clapping)
(upbeat classical music)
