
Spanish: 
CBS
!NET1cWKJHDLate Show With Dae
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English: 
CAN YOU TELL I HAD A GREAT
WEEKEND?
CAN YOU TELL?
I HAD MY FIRST CONJUGAL VISIT
WITH MARTHA STEWART.
(  APPLAUSE )  
BUT YOU KNOW, SAD, ON FRIDAY
MA THAT STEWART ENTERED PRISON,
SHE'S GOING TO BE GONE FOR
LIKE FIVE MONTHS AND THE FIRST
THING THEY DO, AND THIS IS
TRUE, THEY STRIP SEARCHED HER,
AND IN DOING SO, YOU KNOW WHAT
THEY DID, THEY CONFISCATED APPL 
WINNER GETS IT ALL.
HERE'S MY FAVORITE STORY ABOUT
THE DEBATES, AND YOU PROBABLY
SAW THIS IN THE NEWSPAPER.
PEOPLE NOW, THERE'S A RUMOR
GOING AROUND THAT PRESIDENT
BUSH IN THE FIRST DEBATE HAD
SOME KIND OF LISTENING DEVICE
AND SOMEBODY WAS FEEDING HIM
ANSWERS TO THE QUESTIONS FOR
THE DEBATE. AND THEY ACTUALLY
HAD A PHOTOGRAPH OF AND THERE
WAS A BULGE IN HIS JACKET.
I WAS THINKING WELL, YOU KNOW,
THAT'S AN IMPROVEMENT OVER THE

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LAST GUY WHO HAD A BULGE
(  APPLAUSE )  
THANK YOU VERY MUCH, NICE TO
SEE YOU, PAUL.
>> Paul: HAPPY TO SEE YOU
DAVE.
>> Dave: I WAS TELLING THE
AUDIENCE THIS STORY, ME AND MY
SON ARE WATCHING THE BALL GAME
AND SHE'S JUST DISPOSED OF
THIS CUP OF MILLING AND HEAVES
IT ON THE FLOOR, LIKE WHEN
HE'S DONE WITH IT JUST HEAVES
IT.
I WONDER WHERE HE GOT THAT.
THEN HE'S GOT THIS TASTELESS
TEA THING HE'S SUPPOSED TO EAT,
SO HE WOULD GET IT ALL NICE
AND GUM MY, AND EVERY NOW AND
THEN, HE WOULD STICK IT UP
INTO MY MOUTH LIKE THAT, AND
LET ME CHEW ON THAT GUMY
AWFUL.
YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT IF IT WAS
ANYBODY BUT YOUR SON, WOULD
YOU?
ANYWAY, WE HAD A VERY NICE
TIME.
LET ME TELL YOU WHO'S ON THE
PROGRAM TONIGHT WHAT A GREAT
SHOW.
MELINA KANAKAREDES IS ON THE
PROGRAM.
(  CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )  
FROM CSI NEW YORK.
LOVELY WOMAN.
IT'S ON WEDNESDAYS RIGHT HERE
AT 10 P.M. ON CBS.

English: 
AND ALSO, I GOT TO TELL YOU
SOMETHING, WHEN YOU SEE GENIUS
YOU HAVE TO CALL IT OUT.
YOU KNOW THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL?
IT ONE OF THOSE CABLE THINGS.
>> Paul: YES.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> David: AND WE ALL LAUGHED
AT IT BECAUSE DISCOVERY
CHANNEL AND CABLE, YOU KNOW,
IT'S LIKE A WAY TO GOUGE AN
EXTRA HUNDRED BUCKS OUT OF YOU
FOR NOTHING.
WHAT'S IT GOING TO BE LIKE
REAL CLOSEUP FOOTAGE OF
INSECTS?
THAT'S WHAT WE THOUGHT IT WAS
GOING TO BE, AND WHO WANTS
THAT HONESTLY.
IT'S THE GO GO 2000, WHATEVER.
>> Paul: IT'S THE NEW
MILLENNIUM.
>> Dave: EXACTLY.
THAT'S WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR.
BUT THESE PEOPLE AT THE
DISCOVERY CHANNEL ARE GENIUSES,
WHAT THEY DO NOW, THEY HAVE
SHOWS 24 HOURS A DAY OF GUYS
BUILDING MOTHER CYCLES.
>> Paul: YES INDEED.
>> Dave: UNBELIEVABLE.
AND I WAS SKEPTICAL AT FIRST,
THEN I STARTED WATCHING THEM
AND I CAN'T STOP WATCHING THE
DISCOVERY CHANNEL.
AND THE GOOD THING ABOUT BEING
MY AGE, YOUR MEMORY IS SO BAD,
EVEN THOUGH YOU KNOW YOU HAVE
SEEN THE SHOW BEFORE, YOU
CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENS

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TILL YOU WATCH IT AGAIN.
(  APPLAUSE )  
UNBELIEVABLE.
WELL, TONIGHT ON THE SHOW,
FROM THE AMERICAN CHOPPER
PROGRAM WHICH THE TEUTULS, WE
HAVE PAUL TEUTUL SENIOR AND
HIS JOHN WILL BE ON THE SHOW
(  CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )  
I LIKE IT BECAUSE THEY HAVE A
THING IN THERE WHERE THEY BEND
PIPE, I LIKE WATCHING THEM
BEND PIPE.
>> Paul: WHO DOESN'T.
>> Dave: I LIKE TO WATCH THEM
CUT METAL, THEY'RE ALWAYS
CUTTING FENDERS AND I LOVE TO
WATCH THEM WELD.
I LOVE THE WELDING.
I LOVE WATCHING THEM DOING THE
PAINTING AND ALL THE
FABRICATING, I LOVE WATCHING
THE BIG GUY CARRYING THE
ENGINE, MOUNTING THE ENGINE.
I LOVE WHEN THEY HAVE TO TAKE
THE BIKE APART TO TAKE IT OUT
AND HAVE IT PAINTED.
SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME,
BECAUSE I CAN'T STOP WATCHING
IT.
>> Paul: YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
>> Dave: I WOULD HAVE TO THINK
THIS IS THE BIGGEST TELEVISION
HIT IN THE HISTORY OF
TELEVISION.
>> Paul: I LOVE THE SHOW AS

English: 
WELL.
YEAH, WHO CAN RESIST IT.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: AND THE DAD, PAUL
SENIOR, IS ALWAYS PISSED OFF
ABOUT SOMETHING.
>> Paul: WHAT IS THAT ABOUT?
>> Dave: I DON'T KNOW, I'M
GOING TO ASK HIM TONIGHT,
BECAUSE IT SEEMS TO ME LIKE
THINGS ARE GOING GREAT.
A HIT SHOW, THEY'RE BUILDING
BIKES, THEY'RE MAKING MONEY,
BUT HE'S ALWAYS GOT YEAH, OF COU
HATE TO SEE THAT.
YOU KNOW WHAT WE LIKE TO DO
FROM TIME TO TIME ON THIS
PROGRAM, BECAUSE WE HAVE
NOTHING ELSE REALLY TO DO, WE
LIKE TO GET STUFF TOGETHER,
ASSEMBLE STUFF AND DESTROY IT.
WE'VE DESTROYED IT WITH HEAVY
MACHINERY, WE'VE DESTROYED IT
BY THROWING IT OFF BUILDINGS,
AND TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO
DESTROY STUFF OUT ON 53rd
STREET BY RUNNING OVER IT WITH
A NEW YORK CITY TAXI CAB.
>> Paul: AH!
(  CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: AND THE FIRST ITEMS
THAT WILL BE DESTROYED TONIGHT
WITH THE CAB, MAGNUMS OF

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English: 
CHAMPAGNE.
>> Paul: WHAT VINTAGE?
>> Dave: I DON'T KNOW.
WOULD IT HAVE KILLED YOU TO
PUT THE VINTAGE ON THERE?
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Paul: THAT'S NOT GOING TO
MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE.
>> Dave: THERE ARE THE VINTAGE,
THE MAGNUMS OF CHAMPAGNE.
WHERE'S THE NEW YORK CITY CAB.
AND YOU CAN SEE WE'VE BEEN
REHEARSING ALL AFTERNOON,
THERE'S A LITTLE DAMAGE THERE
TO THE GRILL.
JUST AS FASTS AS YOU CAN GO,
HAMMER IT, JUMP ON IT, ANY
TIME YOU'RE READY, TAKE IT
AWAY.
(  APPLAUSE )  
PRETTY GOOD WHACK.
TAKE A LOOK AT THAT IN SLOW
MOTION.
LOOK AT THIS.
WHOA!
(  APPLAUSE )  

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English: 
>> Paul: OH, ANOTHER ANGLE.
>> Dave: EXCELLENT.
>> Paul: HAPPY NEW YEAR.
WE'RE OFF TO A GOOD START.
>> Dave: EVERY NOW AND THEN WE
LIKE TO TALK TO THE MAN WHO,
HE'S LIKE THE MOST POWERFUL
MAN IN ALL OF TELEVISION, HE'S
THE CO-PRESIDENT AND CO-CHIEF
OPERATING OFFICER OF VIACOM,
AND AS YOU KNOW, VIACOM IS
THAT UGLY EVIL EMPIRE THAT THE
MULTI-NATIONAL CORPORATION
THAT OWNS CBS, FOR WHICH WE
WORK.
(  LAUGHTER )  
AND HERE NOW, AS I MENTIONED
BEFORE THE MOST POWERFUL MAN
IN TELEVISION, THIS WILL BE
LES MOONVES, A LITTLE
SOMETHING WE CALL MORE WITH
LES.
♪ MORE MORE MORE WITH LES ♪.
>> Dave: HI, LES, HOW ARE YOU
DOING?
>> HELLO, DAVE.
>> Dave: I NEVER KNOW HOW TO
DESCRIBE VIACOM.
YOU EXPLAIN WHAT IT IS
EXACTLY.
>> VIACOM IS ONE OF THE
LARGEST MEDIA COMPANIES IN THE
WORLD, WE HAVE CBS, WE HAVE
PARAMOUNT PICTURES, WE HAVE
MTV AND SIMON AND SCHUSTER.

English: 
WE ARE A MAJOR, WE ACTUALLY
CONTROL MORE THINGS THAN ANY
COUNTRY IN THE WORLD.
>> Dave: WOW!
WHAT ABOUT THE --
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU CALLED
ME THE MOST POWERFUL MAN IN
MEDIA.
I'M THE MOST POWERFUL MAN IN
THE WORLD.
>> Dave: WOW.
(  APPLAUSE )  
NOW, LES, DO YOU OWN DISCOVERY
CHANNEL?
>> NO, WE DON'T, AND ACTUALLY
WE'RE A LITTLE ANNOYED AT YOU
FOR, YOU KNOW, PROMOING THEM
SO MUCH.
YOU KNOW. WHEN YOU'RE DEAL IS
DONE IN 15 YEARS ARE YOU
PLANNING ONGOING TO THE
DISCOVERY CHANNEL?
>> Dave: HAVE YOU OF SEEN THIS
SHOW WHERE THE GILES ARE
BUILDING MOTORCYCLES?
>> YOU KNOW, I'M NOT A
MOTORCYCLE KIND OF GUY, DAVE.
>> Dave: BUT IT'S FASCINATING,
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A GUY BEN
PIPE?
>> I CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT ON
THE AI
>> Dave: WHOA!
>> Paul: THAT GIVES US FREE
REIGN NOW.

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English: 
ALL BETS ARE OFF NOW.
>> Dave: TO EACH HIS OWN.
NOW LISTEN, NOW, DO YOU GUYS,
DOES VIACOM OWN THAT INFINITY
BROADCASTING, THE RADIO
COMPANY?
>> YES, WE DO, WE OWN THE
INFINITY BROADCASTING COMPANY.
>> Dave: NOW A LANDMARK THING
HAPPENED IN THE LAST WEEK,
HOWARD STERN, WHO IS LIKE MADE
ALL THE MONEY FOR INFINITY
WITH HIS RADIO SHOW FOR THE
LAST 15 YEARS SORE ANNOUNCES
THAT HE'S GOING TO THIS
SATELLITE RADIO DEAL.
DID YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT
THAT?
>> THAT IS CORRECT, HE IS
LEAVING US FOR A DEAL WORTH
$100 MILLION PER YEAR.
ALMOST WHAT YOU MAKE.
(  LAUGHTER )  
>> Dave: BUT THIS... WHERE ARE
YOU CALLING FROM, BY THE WAY,
LES?
>> I'M CALLING FROM RIGHT DOWN
THE STREET AT BLACK ROCK, THE
CBS HEADQUARTERS.
>> Dave: BECAUSE IT SOUNDS
LIKE HAVE YOU AN AUDIENCE WITH
YOU LIKE I HAVE AN AUDIENCE
WITH ME.
DO YOU HAVE YOUR OWN AUDIENCE
THERE TONIGHT?
>> WELL, YOU HAVE A LOT OF
PEOPLE PAYING TO SEE YOU AND I
HAVE A LOT PEOPLE PAYING TO
SEE ME.
>> Dave: THIS HOWARD STERN
THG, THIS WILL CHANGE THE

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FACE OF RADIO, WON'T IT?
>> IT VERY WELL COULD.
PEOPLE A YEAR AND A HALF FROM
NOW WILL HAVE TO PAY $12.59 A
MONTH TO HEAR HOWARD STERN.
>> Dave: WOULD YOU PAY THAT
KIND OF MONEY?
>> WOULD I PAY THAT KIND OF
MONEY?
I WOULDN'T PAY THAT KIND OF
MONEY TO HEAR YOU.
>> Dave: WAIT A MINUTE!
I'M JUST SITTING HERE.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I'M JUST SITTING HERE!
I HAVEN'T CAUSED ANY TROUBLE,
I'M JUST SITTING HERE!
>> YOU'RE ACTIVELY PROMOTING
DISCOVERY CHANNEL ALL PROGRAM
LONG.
>> Dave: BUT, NOW, THAT'S
WHAT'S, BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL
HAVE TO GET THE SATELLITE FOR
THEIR CAR OR THEIR HOME TO
LISTEN TO HOWARD, RIGHT?
>> THAT IS CORRECT, IT'S SORT
OF GOING TO BE LIKE, THEY'RE
HOPING IT TURNS INTO LIKE
CABLE TELEVISION.
>> Dave: YEARS FROM NOW PEOPLE
WILL LOOK BACK ON THIS AND SAY
HERE'S THE MOMENT THAT THE
RADIO INDUSTRY ABSOLUTELY WAS
TURNED ON ITS HEAD, DON'T YOU
THINK?
>> OR IT COULD BE AN ABJECT
FAILURE AND PEOPLE WILL SAY
HOUR STERN NEVER SHOULD HAVE
LEFT INFINITY.
>> Dave: BUT HOUR IS SMARTER
THAN THAT?
>> HE'S A PRETTY SMART GUY.
>> Dave: NOW, WHO WILL REPLACE
HOWARD?

English: 
>> I DON'T KNOW, ARE YOU
INTERESTED.
>> Dave: WELL, NO, LES, I HAVE
A JOB HERE.
>> I GUESS YOU DO AND WE HOPE
FOR MANY MORE YEARS.
>> Dave: A COUPLE WEEKS AGO
NBC ANNOUNCED THAT JAY LENO
WAS LEAVING THE TONIGHT SHOW
AND WE ALL THOUGHT, WHY.
AND THEN HE SAID IN FIVE
YEARS.
>> YEAH, THAT SEEMED SORT OF
SILLY, BUT I'M COMING ON THE
AIR TO ASK YOU IF YOU WOULD
RETIRE IN 15 YEARS.
I'M OFFERING YOU A CONTRACT
TILL THE YEAR 2019 SO WE CAN
PREPARE FOR YOUR SUCCESSOR.
THAT'S WHAT WE'RE TRYING TO DO
HERE BECAUSE I NEED TIME TO
REP FOR WHAT YOU LEAVE.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave:.
>> IF I TAKES FIVE YEARS TO
PREPARE FOR LENO TO LEAVE,
IT'S GOING TO TAKE US AT LEAST
15 YEARS.
>> Dave: BUT NOW WAIT A
MINUTE.
IN ALL SERIOUSNESS, AND YOU
KNOW HOW STUFF LIKE THIS WORKS,
BECAUSE HERE'S WHAT IT LOOKS
LIKE TO ME.
CONE AN, WHO IS A NICE GUY,
BUT JUST A KID REALLY, AND

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HE'S GOT THE SHOW THAT PAUL
AND I USED TO DO, ALL OF A
SUDDEN HE'S LIKE THE MOST
POWERFUL MAN SKPEFR HE PUSHES
LENO OUT OF THE TONIGHT WHO
AND THEY GAVE IT TO CONAN IN
FIVE YEARS.
IS THAT WHAT HAPPENED?
>> IT'S SORTS OF A LAME DUCK
SITUATION, AND MAY I ADD THAT
THE DAVE LETTERMAN RATINGS
SINCE THE SEASON BEGAN ARE WAY
UP AND JAY LENO'S WAY DOWN.
(  CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )  
SO CLEARLY AT NBC THEY DIDN'T
MAKE THE RIGHT MOVE, AND WE'RE
SMARTER HERE AT CBS.
>> Dave: WELL, THAT'S VERY
NICE OF YOU TO SAY.
NOW, WHO MADE THIS DEAL, WAS
IT CONAN'S PEOPLE, LENO'S
PEOPLE OR THAT LITTLE BEADY
EYED WEASEL AT NBC, JEFF
ZUCKER?
>> I THINK ITSELF THE LAST ONE
YOU MENTIONED.
>> Dave: ALL RIGHT.
HOW WAS YOUR SUMMER,
EVERYTHING GOOD?
>> EVERYTHING WENT EXTREMELY
WELL, WE'RE OFF TO A GOOD
START.
AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO
THE YEAR.
>> Dave: WHO ARE YOU GOING TO
VOTE FOR, LES?
>> I CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT.
>> Dave: DID YOU SEE THE
DEBATE?

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>> I DID.
>> Dave: WHAT DO YOU THINK?
>> NO COMMENT.
>> Dave: I WANT TO YOU WATCH
THESE GUYS, HOW ABOUT THIS,
YOU GET A COUPLE GUYS BUILDING
MOTORCYCLES AND HOT BABES DROP
BY.
>> I LIKE THE LAST PART.
>> Dave: I THOUGHT YOU WERE
THE GUY WHO LIKED BENDING
PIPE.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>>.
>> Dave: NOW, LISTEN, THANK
YOU FOR APPEARING WITH US
TONIGHT, YOU'LL BE RECEIVING A
$150 GIFT CERTIFICATE
COMPLEMENTS OF YOUR FRIENDS AT
MENS WEARHOUSE.
YOU'LL LIKE THE WAY YOU LOOK,
ALL RIGHT?
>> THANK YOU, DAVE.
>> Dave: MY PLEASURE.
(  APPLAUSE )  
THERE YOU GO.
JUST LITTLE TOO FUNNY.
ALL RIGHT, WE GOTTA RUN OVER
SOMETHING ELSE NOW, THIS TIME
I UNDERSTAND IT'S SUPER BALLS.

English: 
LOOK AT THAT.
>> Paul: CHAMPAGNE DID THAT?
>> Dave: LOOKS LIKE ME IN MY
OLD COMMUTING DAYS.
HERE WE GO.
TURN ON THE CAB ASK LET'S
ROLL.
WOW.
(  APPLAUSE )  
THAT DIDN'T SEEM LIKE
ANYTHING.
LET'S SEE IT AGAIN.
MAYBE THIS WILL BE --.
>> Paul: OH YEAH, IT HAS BOTH
ELEMENTS GOING FOR IT.
THE GLASS SMASHES, AND THE
BALLS GO FLYING.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: THE KID IN THE RED
SWEATSHIRT IS VERY EXCITED.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
MELINA KANAKAREDES, EVERYBOD
COLUMBUS DAY.
HAPPY COLUMBUS DAY.
>> Paul: HAPPY COLUMBUS DAY TO
YOU.
>> Dave: BEFORE WE BRING OUDg7
MELINA KANAKAREDES WE'RE GOING

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BACK OUT TO 53rd STREET.
THIS TIME IS I IT'S...
(  LAUGHTER )  
MAY I SEE YOUR LICENSE AND
REGISTRATION PLEASE?[Ju■
HERE WE GO, GET READY.
28 GALLONS OF PAINT.
(  APPLAUSE )  
THAT'S AMAZING.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THAT IN
SLOW MOTION.
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.
THIS LOOKS LIKE THE PAINT JOB
THE TEUTULS MIGHT PUT ON A
CUSTOM BIKE.
>> Paul: NICE.
YEAH, RIGHT INTO THE CAMERA
LENS.
>> Dave: I'VE HAD DREAMS LIKE
THIS.
WOW.
>> Paul: I GOT TIES LIKE THAT.
>> Dave: I KNOW.
SO NOW WE GO FROM A CAN OF
PAINT TO A KANAKAREDES.
SEE HOW THAT WORKS?
>> Paul: WHOA!
>> Dave: OUR FIRST GUEST IS
ONE OF THE STARS OF THE NEW

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HIT SERIES, CSI NEW YORK,
WHICH AIRS WEDNESDAY NIGHTS
HERE ON CBS, PLEASE WELCOME
MELINA KANAKAREDES.
(  CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )  
HOW ARE YOU?
>> HI THERE, I'M SO GOOD.
>> Dave: WELCOME TO THE SHOW.
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU'RE ON A
BIG HIT, THAT'S NICE.
>> IT'S BEEN TERRIFIC,.
>> Dave: ARE WE EVEN CLOSE TO
YOUR NAME?
>> YOU'RE BEYOND PERFECT.
I LIKED THE KF PAINT,
KANAKAREDES.
THAT WAS VERY CUTE.
>> Dave: WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD,
WAS THAT DIFFICULT TO HAVE A
LONG NAME?
>> IT WAS KIND OF HORRIBLE, MY
DAUGHTER IS FOUR NOW AND WE'RE
GETTING READY TO GO TO
KINDERGARTEN SO, THE MEMORIES
ARE FLOODING BACK, I WAS STILL
GOING K, A, THE KIDS WERE DONE
THE W THE TEST, I'M N, A.

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English: 
SO IT WAS A LITTLE DIFFICULT.
THEN I DECIDED I WAS GOING TO
FALL IN LOVE WITH A GUY AND HE
WAS GOING TO BE A SMITH JONES
BROWN, AND I FELL IN LOVE WITH
A CONSTANTINEDES.
>> Dave: WHAT IS YOUR
DAUGHTER'S FIRST NAME?
>> ZOE,.
A VERY SHORT GREEK NAME.
AND THE OTHER ONE IS CARINA.
>> Dave: WHAT WAS YOUR FAMILY
LIFE AS A KID?
>> A VERY TRADITIONAL GREEK
FAMILY, WE HAD A LOT OF WOMEN
IN THE HOUSEHOLD.
MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING WAS
GREAT, IT SORT OF EXAGGERATED
SLIGHTLY WHAT MY LIFE WAS LIKE,
BUT MY AUNT HAD THE PLASTIC ON
THE FURNITURE, NOT US, AND IT
WAS FUN.
VERY TRADITIONAL.
MY PARENTS WERE VERY MUCH,
VERY SUPPORTIVE OF ME BUT VERY
CAUTIOUS.
YOU KNOW, BE A GOOD GIRL.
AND THAT WHOLE THING.
WE SPOKE GREEK IN THE HOUSE.
>> Dave: TODAY THAT SOUNDS
VERY EXOTIC TO BE DOING THAT.
>> MY GIRLS ONLY SPEAK GREEK

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IN THE HOUSE TOO.
WE TRY VERY HARD TO KEEP THE
LANGUAGE ALIVE AND OUR CULTURE
ALIVE.
>> Dave: GOOD FOR US, BECAUSE
I CAN'T BELIEVE THERE'S A VERY
LARGE GREEK SPEAKING POP NEWS
THIS COUNTRY.
I'M SURE IT'S SPOKEN, BUT NOT
A HUGE POPULATION?
>> NO, NO REALLY, BUT I GREW
UP IN OHIO, AND MY GRANDFATHER
WAS A CANDY MAKER SO I WAS
VERY FAMOUS BACK THEN BECAUSE
I BROUGHT THE FREE CHOCOLATES.
BUT IT WAS OUR SMALL LITTLE
COMMUNITY, BUT WE ALL SPOKE
ONLY GREEK.
IF YOU WANTED TO BE FED AT MY
GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE, YOU HAD
TO ASK IN GREEK OR YOU DIDN'T
GET IT.
>> Dave: I HATE TO DO THIS TO
YOU, BUT I'M DYING TO HEAR
WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE IF YOU
COULD SPEAK SOME GREEK.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
YOU LOOK VERY HANDSOME TODAY.
>> Dave: I'M NOT SURE YOU SAID
THAT.
>> YES, I DID.
DAVE THAT'S BEAUTIFUL.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Dave: GOOD LORD, NOW WHAT'S
GOING ON?
>> I JUST HAD TO SNAP MY
LITTLE SKIRT THERE.
EXCUSE ME.
>> Dave: SPEAKING GREEK AND
SUDDENLY SHE'S UNDRESSING.
>> NO, I GOT EXCITED.
(  APPLAUSE )  

English: 
THE MOTORCYCLE GUYS ARE COMING
ON NEXT, SO I FIGURE I'LL BE
THE CHICK FIRST.
>> Dave: GREEK MUST BE
DIFFICULT TO LEARN, IT'S GOT
TO BE IMPOSSIBLE TO LEARN,
RIGHT?
>> NO, NO, BECAUSE WE SPOKE IT
FIRST IN THE HOUSE AND IT WAS
SOMETHING THAT CAME NATURALLY.
THEN YOU LEARN ENGLISH, AND IT
HELPS OUT IN,?ES, I HAVE.
>> Dave: HE'S A WONDERFUL MAN,
ISN'T HE?
>> YES.
>> Dave: WE WANT TO GET THE
MARQUIS OF OUR THEATER INTO
YOUR SHOW LIKE EVERY EPISODE.
>> OKAY, THAT SHOULDN'T BE
HARD.
>> Dave: BECAUSE YOU'RE
DRIVING DOWN THE STREET, COULD
BE ANY STREET CORKS BE
BROADWAY.
>> WITH THE KIND OF UNIQUE
THINGS YOU DO OUTSIDE WITH
CABS I'M SURE THERE'S DEBODIES
THAT SHOW UP TOO.
>> Dave: IF THERE PLACE ISN'T
A CRIME SCENE, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT IS.
(  APPLAUSE )  
BUT YOU DO MOST OF IT IN
CALIFORNIA, BUT SOME HERE.
>> MOST OF IT IN CALIFORNIA,
SOME HERE.
I STARTED OUT MY CAREER HERE
IN NEW YORK, I LOVE NEW YORK,
IT'S MY CITY, WE STILL HAVE
OUR HOME HERE.E, WE SHOULD HAVE

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ONE OF THOSE.
(  APPLAUSE )  
YOU'RE DOING A FILM WITH
ROBERT DENIRO NOT SO LONG AGO.
>> RIGHT, A FEW YEARS BACK.
I WAS VERY NERVOUS THE FIRST
TIME I MET HIM.
>> Dave: IS HE A NICE FELLOW?
>> VERY VERY NICE.
AND IT WAS AN ODD THING,
BECAUSE HE'S ROBERT DENIRO.
AND I WAS, MR. DENIRO, HOW
NICE TO MEET YOU, I REMEMBER
BEING VERY NERVOUS, I HAD TO
AUDITION IN A HOTEL ROOM,
WHICH WAS ODD, AND DADDY WOULD
HAVE BEEN OKAY WITH IT, IT WAS
JUST ONE OF THOSE WEIRD
MOMENTS WHERE HE'S LATE AND I
KEPT, DIDN'T WANT TO WRINKLE
UP, SO I KEPT TAKING OFF MY
SKIRT AND PUTTING IT BACK ON,
BECAUSE HE WAS LATE, THEY KEPT
CALLING SO, BY THEN I WAS NOT
NERVOUS ANY MORE, I GOT THE
PART, AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHO TO
KISS FIRST.
IT WAS VERY EXCITING.
>> Dave: THAT'S GOOD.
I NOTICE YOU STILL HAVE AN
INTEREST IN TAKING OFF YOUR
SKIRT EVEN TODAY.
(  APPLAUSE )  

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>> NO, NO.
>> Dave: AND WHY NOT?
>> MY FRIEND DESIGNS WOMEN'S
CLOTHING AND I HAVE TO TELL
HIM THERE'S A FAULTY DESIGN IN
THIS.
>> Dave: NO, IT JUST FINE,
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH
THAT.
YOUR SHOW IS ON WEDNESDAY
NIGHTS, A HUGE HIT, CSI NEW
YORK.
THANK GOD YOU'RE HERE.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.
WELCOME BACK.
>> I GOT A BONE TO PICK WITH
YOU.
>> Dave: ARE YOU GOING TO HURT
ME?
WHAT IS THE BONENESS WITH WHEN
YOU HAD WILL SMITH ON YOUR
SHOW YOU REFERED TO ME AS THE
OLD GUY.
THE OLD GUY THAT DOES NOTHING?
WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THAT?
>> Dave: HERE'S MY OBSERVATION
ABOUT THE SHOW, I DIDN'T WANT
TO GET RIGHT INTO THIS, BUT I
WAS GOING TO GET INTO THIS.
IT SEEMS LIKE YOUR SON PAULY
AND VINNY AND OCCASIONALLY
MIKEY, BY THE WAY, WHAT IS THE
DEAL ON MIKEY?

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>> MIKEY IS THE DEAL.
>> Dave: HOW OLD IS MIKEY?
>> 24.
>> 26.
>> Dave: YEAH, THE MEMORY
STARTS TO GO GO WHEN YOU GET
TO BE AN OLD GUY.
HERE'S WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE TO
ME ON THE SHOW, AND YOU TELL
ME IF THIS IS ACCURATE.
FIRST OF ALL, BY THE WAY, HOW
DID THIS BEGIN, WHOSE IDEA WAS
THIS TO PUT YOU GUYS ON
TELEVISION?
>> WE WERE APPROACHED BY GREG,
THE CO-EXECUTIVE PRODUCER OF
SURVIVOR, AND I THINK THEY HAD
SOMETHING GOING WITH DISCOVERY
TO GET EAST COAST BUILDER, AND
HE PITCHED THE SHOW, WE SAID
YES, THREE DAYS LATER THEY
WERE DOWN FILMING AND WE DID
TWO PILOTS AND THEY SIGNED US
RIGHT UP.
>> WE WERE SUPPOSED TO DO A
DOCUMENTARY.
>> Dave: AND YOU'RE IN OUR
THIRD SEASON NOW OR FOURTH?
>> IT'S ACTUALLY THE SECOND.
>> FEELS LIKE THE FOURTH
SEASON THOUGH.
>> Dave: THEY RUN THEM OUT OF
ORDER AND STUFF, I'VE SEEN ALL
OF THEM LIKE THREE OR FOUR
TIMES.
WHY CAN'T I STOP WATCHING THIS
SHOW, WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH
ME?
IT'S FASCINATING, I LOVE IT
WHEN YOU GET ON THAT MACHINE

English: 
AND YOU START BENDING PIPE
MAKING THE HANDLE BARS, AND
TELL ME ABOUT WELDING.
HOW LONG DOES I TAKE TO BECOME
A MASTER WELDER?
>> MOSTLY WHAT WE DO IS MAKE
WELDING, BUT THE REAL TEDIOUS
WELDING TAKES A LITTLE LONGER,
BUT I COULD TEACH YOU HOW TO
MIG WELD IN A DAY.
>> Dave: IF YOU WATCH THE SHOW,
THEY START OUT WITH NOTHING,
JUST SCRAP MELGS OR WHATEVER
IT IS AND AT THE END OF THE
SHOW IT'S CRAFTED BEAUTIFULLY,
IT'S ARTWORK WHEN YOU'RE DONE
WITH IT.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Dave: YOU GUYS ARE TRULY
SKILLED TRADES MANY, THERE'S
NO GETTING AROUND IT.
SO HERE'S WHAT HAPPENS.
PAULY DOES ALL THE WORK, AND
OH INDICATION ALLEY MIKE WILL
COME IN, AND VINNY DOES A LOT
OF THE WORK.
AND YOU COME IN AND YOU SCREAM
AT THEM.
YOU SCREAM AT PAULY.
AND WE DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
UPSET.
WHY ARE YOU SO UPSET?
>> HERE'S THE DEAL.
WE FILM ABOUT 150 HOURS FOR A
TWO-HOUR SHOW.
FOR TWO HOURS, HE DOES
SOMETHING, AND THE 148 HOURS
I'M CHASING HIS ASS TRYING TO

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GET HIM TO DO SOMETHING.
THAT'S THE REALITY OF IT.
THAT'S WHY YOU SEE ME ALL THE
TIME GETTING CRAZY.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: BUT ANYWAY, ALL I CAN
COMMENT ON IS WHAT I SEE ON
THE SHOW.
AND PAULY WILL HAVE AN IDEA
FOR A BIKE AND HE'LL PUT IT
TOGETHER AND COMES UP WITH
THESE UNBELIEVABLE THINGS THAT
ARE BEAUTIFUL AND FUNCTIONAL
AS WELL.
AND THEN YOU COME IN AND
SCREAM, THEN YOU SAY I'M GOING
TO LUNCH, I'M GOING TO GET A
MASSAGE, I GOTTA GO, I'LL BE
BACK.
THEN YOU'RE GONE.
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE WHEELY
BAR, WHAT HAPPENED TO THE
EXHAUST, OR WHATEVER, YOU'RE
ALWAYS SCREAM GOING SOMETHING.
WHY IS THERE A --
>> MOTIVATION.
>> HE'S THE MOTIVATOR.
>> Dave: WHY IS THERE A TIME
LIMIT ON THIS?
>> MOST OF THE TIME WE'RE
EITHER TRYING TO GET A BIKE
READY FOR AN UNVEILING FOR A
SHOW, OR THERE REALLY IS A
DEADLINE WITH THE SHOW AS FAR
AS WHEN IT HAS TO BE FINISHED
AND THEN AIRED.
SO THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING.
PLUS WE HAVE SO MUCH ELSE
GOING ON AROUND OUR FILMING
SCHEDULE THAT IT'S JUST ALWAYS
A PINCH, AND THERE'S ALWAYS A

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LOT OF PRESSURE.
BUT IF THERE WAS NO PRESSURE
AT ALL, HE'D STILL BE THE WAY
HE IS.
ALWAYS THAT WAY.
>> Dave: SO SAY YOU WOULD TAKE
A THREE MONTH VACATION.
HOW WOULD THINGS WORK AT THE
SHOP?
>> FORGET ABOUT IT.
>> IF HE LEFT?
WE'D HAVE A PARTY.
>> SEE WHAT I MEAN.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: HOW MANY BIKES DO YOU
BUILD IN A YEAR?
>> ABOUT 60 BIKES A YEAR.
>> Dave: AND THEY'RE NOT ALL
THE KIND OF BIKES WE SEE ON
THE SHOW?
>> NO.
>> Dave: SO JT A REGULAR MAN
OR WOMAN WANTED TO COME IN AND
BUY A BIKE THEY COULD DO THAT?
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> Dave: DO YOU HAVE AN
INVENTORY OF BIKES?
>> NOT REALLY.
>> MOSTLY BUILDING, THEY'LL
COME IN AND PLACE AN ORDER, WE
DON'T LIKE TO INVENTORY TOO
MUCH STUFF.
>> Dave: I HAVE A FEELING AND
I MENTIONED THIS TO LES
MOONVES THAT THE PLACE, YOUR
SHOP,.
>> ROCK TAVERN, YEAH.
>> Dave: IS CRAWLING WITH NOT
BABIES.
IS THAT TRUE?
>> WHERE DID YOU GET THAT
FROM?

English: 
>> Dave: BECAUSE I SEE THEM AT
THE MOTORCYCLE SHOWS, IT'S THE
HOT MOTORCYCLE CHICKS, THEY'RE
ALL OVER, AREN'T THEY?
>> YOU'RE GOING TO GET ME IN
TROUBLE.
>> Dave: WHY DON'T WE WORK
SOME OF THAT INTO THE SHOW?
>> WE GET A LOT OF REQUESTS
FOR THAT.
>> Dave: I UNDERSTAND MIKEY IS
HERE.
>> MIKE IS HERE,.
>> Dave: YOUR OTHER SON?
>> YEAH.
(  APPLAUSE )  
GOOD TO BE HERE, THANKS FOR
HAVING ME ON THE SHOW.
>> Dave: DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT BUILDING MOTORCYCLES,
MIKE?
>> I'LL BE HONEST WITH YOU,
NO.
>> Dave: WHAT DO DO YOU FOR A
LIVING THEN?
>> I MAKE THE LAUGHS.
>> Dave: OH, MY GOD.
HE MAKES THE LAUGHS.
MIKEY, DID YOU EVER GET YOUR
MOTORCYCLE LICENSE?
>> NO, I DIDN'T, DAVE.
>> Dave: SO HE CAN'T LEGALLY
RIDE A MOTORCYCLE.
>> HE CAN WITH A PERMIT.
>> I DO RIDE, DAVE.
I RIDE VERY WELL.

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English: 
>> Dave: I KNOW, BUT IT'S
ILLEGAL, YOU'RE GOING TO GET
THROWN IN JAIL?
>> I DOUBT IT, DAVE.
>> Dave: OH, YEAH, I FORGOT,
YOU MAKE THE LAUGHS.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: WE'LL BE RIGHT
>> Dave: YES, SIR, WE'RE BACK
WITH THE TEUTULS.
WHAT WILL YOU GUYS DO NOW?
HOW MUCH LONGER DO YOU WANT TO
DO THE SHOW?
IT MUST BE FUN, BUT IT
PROBABLY GETS IN THE WAY OF
YOUR WORK.
>> YEAH, IT'S PRETTY HECTIC.
I THINK ANOTHER FOUR YEARS.
>> Dave: IT'S A GREAT IDEA FOR
A SHOW.
DID YOU HAVE ANY IDEA THAT IT
WOULD BE THIS SUCCESSFUL?
>> NO, NEVER THOUGHT OF IT.
>> Dave: DO YOU THINK IT'S
JUST THE ACTIVITY OF CRAFTING
METAL INTO SOMETHING USABLE,
OR DO YOU THINK IT'S THE
PERSONALITY OF THE TWO OF YOU
THAT MAKES IT SO COMPEL
ORGANIZE THE COMBINATION?
>> I THINK IT'S THE
COMBINATION OF EVERYBODY, NOT
ONLY US, BUT THE OTHER TALENT
THAT'S ON THERE, PRETTY
INTRIGUING PEOPLE, AND
EVERYBODY HAS A CERTAIN
PERSONALITY ABOUT THEM THAT IS

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ATTRACTIVE.
>> Dave: IF I WANTED TO COME
IN ASK BUY A MOTORCYCLE, KID
JUST COME RIGHT UP TO THE
STORE AND TALK TO YOU GUYS.
>> YOU HAVE TO CALL FIRST.
(  LAUGHTER )  
>> Dave: OKAY.
NOW, TELL US WHAT WE'RE
LOOKING AT.
THIS IS THE ONE YOU BUILT FOR
DAVIS LOVE, THE PROFESSIONAL
GOLFER.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Dave: THIS IS EXTREME
LOOKING.
BY THE WAY, WHAT DOES THE WORD
CHOPPER REFER TO, WHAT DOES
THAT MEAN EXACTLY?
>> IT'S JUST THE TERM, BACK IN
THE DAY, YOU KNOW CUTTING
THINGS OFF THE BIKE.
>> THEY WOULD TAKE A STOCK
BIKE, CUT THE NECK, STRETCH
IT.
>> JUST MINIMIZE WHAT YOU PUT
ON THE BIKE.
>> Dave: SO YOU'RE
CONCENTRATING ON THE UTILITY
OF THE BIKE AND GETTING RID OF
ALL THE EXCESS WEIGHT.
>> EXACTLY.
>> Dave: NOW, DOES DAVIS LOVE
ACTUALLY RIDE THIS BIKE?
>> HE LOVES IT.
>> Dave: NOW THIS DOESN'T, I
CAN'T PICTURE A GOLFER ON A
BIKE LIKE THISNESS HE'S A
CRAZY MAN.
>> THAT WAS THE GREAT THING
ABOUT BUILDING THIS BIKE,
BECAUSE IT'S IN SUCH CONTRAST
WITH WHAT HE DOES FOR A
LIVING.
>> Dave: DID YOU SELL IT TO

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HIM?
>> YEAH.
IT WAS ACTUALLY HIS 40th
BIRTHDAY.
>> Dave: MAY I ASK WHAT THE
PRICE WAS?
>> I DON'T REMEMBER.
>> HUNDRED GRAND.
>> TWO HUNDRED GRAND.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
(  LAUGHTER )  
>> IT WAS A BIRTHDAY PRESENT.
>> Dave: IS THERE SOMEBODY
LOOKING AFTER THE BOOKS UP
THERE?
>> FORTUNATELY WE DO.
>> Dave: MIKEY, YOU REMEMBER
WHAT THIS BIKE COST?
>> ONE MILLION, DAVE.
ONE MILLION DOLLARS.
>> Dave: ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU,
THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.
AND THESE, BY THE WAY, THEY'RE
ALL, YOUR DESIGN, YOU COME UP
WITH THE IDEA AND YOU --
>> HOLD ON.
ACTUALLY I DID MOST OF THE
DESIGN ON THAT BIKE, I DID.
>> Dave: WHAT IS THE
TREATMENTS HERE WITH THE FORK
IS BENEATH THE AXIS OF THE
WHEEL?
>> IT'S A SPRINGER FRONT END,
IT'S AN OLDER STYLE.
THAT'S ALL.
>> Dave: VERY NICE.

English: 
LET'S SEE WHO DESIGNED THIS
ONE.
>> ACTUALLY VINNY AND MIKEY
BUILT THAT BIKE TOGETHER.
HI THEY HAD TWO ONE-HOUR
SPECIALS.
>> Dave: THAT'S A BEAUTY.
WHO WAS IT BIT FOR?
>> MIKEY AND VINNY.
>> Dave: THEY BUILT THEIR OWN
BIKE?
GOOD FOR THEM.
IS THAT A HAND OPERATED SHIFT?
>> YEAH, THAT'S A SUICIDE
SHIFT.
>> Dave: ARE THESE BIKES FAST?
>> YEAH, SUCH THEM ARE REALLY
FAST.
>> Dave: IF I WANTED TO, COULD
I RIDE THIS BIKE TO
INDIANAPOLIS TO SEE MY MOM
FROM HERE?
>> YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO RIDE
THAT BIKE.
>> WE COULD BUILD YOU A BIKE
YOU COULD RIDE ALL THE TIME.
>> Dave: HOW MUCH WOULD THAT
COST?
>> ASK MICHAEL.
>> MIKE, HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO
CHARGE HIM.
>> 3725.
(  APPLAUSE )  
>> Dave: AND THIS IS THE WILL
SMITH BIKE.
MAN, IS THAT SLICK LOOKING.
THAT'S JUST ARTWORK THERE,
IT'S JUST GORGEOUS.
NICE JOB.
WELL, IT'S GREAT FUN TO WATCH.

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AND AS I'VE SAID NOW EIGHT
TIMES, I CAN'T STOP WATCHING
IT.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Dave: KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK
AND I'LL GIVE OF A CALL ONE
DAY.
>> DEFINITELY.
>> Dave: NICE TO SEE YOU,
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
OF.
MIKEY, THANK YOU VERY MUC MELINA
KANAKAREDES.
AND LES MOONVES, LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN.
TOMORROW RICHARD LEWIS, THE
WALL FLOWERS WITH WARREN
ZEVON.
HAVE A LOVELY EVENING, THANKS
FOR WATCHING.
GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY.

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