WELL, YOU KNOW, FREQUENT VIEWERS
OF "THE LATE SHOW"" KNOW THAT A
COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO, WE HAD ON
DEMOCRATIC CONGRESSIONAL
CANDIDATE, ALEXANDRIA
OCASIO-CORTEZ.
YEAH, PEOPLE ARE VERY EXCITED
ABOUT HER.
SHE'S A SELF-DESCRIBED
DEMOCRATIC SOCIALIST, AND SHE
DEFEATED ONE OF THE MOST
ESTABLISHED MEMBERS OF
THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY: NEW YORK
CONGRESSMAN AND THAT BABY DOLL
HEAD-SPIDER FROM THE FIRST "TOY
STORY," JOE CROWLEY.
SHE'S A RISING STAR OF THE
DEMOCRATIC PARTY, WHIPPING UP
RALLIES FOR CANDIDATES ACROSS
THE COUNTRY.
AND SATURDAY, SHE WAS IN
ST. LOUIS TO STUMP FOR
DEMOCRATIC CONGRESSIONAL
CANDIDATE, CORI BUSH.
AND THE RALLY WAS ATTENDED BY A
CONSERVATIVE COLUMNIST NAMED
VIRGINIA KRUTA, AND WHAT SHE SAW
SHOCKED HER TO HER CORE.
SHE SAYS WHEN OCASIO-CORTEZ
SPOKE, "I SAW SOMETHING TRULY
TERRIFYING.
I SAW JUST HOW EASY IT WOULD BE
TO FALL FOR THE POPULIST LINES
THEY WERE SHOUTING FROM THAT
STAGE.
I SAW HOW EASY IT WOULD BE, AS A
PARENT, TO ACCEPT THE IDEA THAT
MY CHILDREN DESERVE HEALTHCARE
AND EDUCATION."
( LAUGHTER )
YES, YES, IT'S EVERY PARENTS'
WORST NIGHTMARE: THAT
LATE-NIGHT PHONE CALL, A VOICE
SAYING, "YOUR COLLEGE-EDUCATED
CHILD HAS JUST SEEN A DOCTOR,
AND SHE'S GOING TO BE ALL
RIGHT."
"NO!"
DAMN YOU!
NO!
WHY, GOD?
WHY?"
( LAUGHTER )
READING THAT IS LIKE WATCHING
SOMEONE ALMOST HAVE A LIGHT BULB
GO OFF IN THEIR HEAD BUT NOT
QUITE GETTING THERE.
"OKAY, I'M FREEZING...
AND THERE'S A JACKET RIGHT
THERE.
I COULD PUT IT ON...
BUT WHAT IF A HYPOTHETICAL POOR
PERSON GETS A JACKET THEY DON'T
DESERVE?
AAAAND, I'M DEAD."
( LAUGHTER )
SCENE.
KRUTA-- KRUTA OR CRUDDA?
KRUTA WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HER
EXPERIENCE, BECAUSE AS IT SAYS
IN HER CLOSING: "I LEFT THE
RALLY WITH A PHOTO-- IN PART TO
REMIND MYSELF OF THAT TIME I
CRASHED A RALLY HEADLINED BY A
SOCIALIST, BUT ALSO IN PART TO
REMIND MYSELF THAT THERE, BUT
FOR THE GRACE OF GOD, GO I."
( LAUGHTER )
FIRST, YOU CAN'T CRASH A RALLY.
( LAUGHTER )
THEY WANT A LOT OF PEOPLE TO BE
THERE.
"FIRST, I CRASHED THEN RALLY;
THEN I HACKED INTO ZAPPOS USING
ONLY MY CREDIT CARD."
( LAUGHTER )
SECOND, "THERE, BUT FOR THE
GRACE OF GOD, GO I"?
YOU KNOW THAT GOD'S A SOCIALIST,
RIGHT?
JESUS DIDN'T CHARGE THE LEPERS A
CO-PAY.
"LOOK, I WOULD CURE YOUR
BLINDNESS BUT YOU'RE OUT OF
NETWORK."
( LAUGHTER )
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
