
Ultimate Alpha Woman Compilation: 5 Bestsellers In One Book

Daniel Marques

Published by 22 Lions Bookstore, 2015.
Ultimate Alpha Woman Compilation: 5 Bestsellers In One Book

By Daniel Marques

Copyright (C) Daniel Marques, 2013 (1st Ed.) All rights reserved.

Published by 22 Lions

Draft 2 Digital Edition

# Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright Page

Introduction to the compilation

BOOK 1: Alpha Female: Where to Find a Man and How do You Get Him

BOOK 2: Alpha Female: Why Men Cheat and How to Prevent It

BOOK 3: The Rules of Seduction: from attraction to great sex and fulfilling relationships

BOOK 4: The Ultimate Sex Manual: Uncensored Secret Strategies (For Women) to Seduce and Fuck Like a Pornstar All Day Long

BOOK 5: The Rules of Love: The Truth about Compassion, Attraction and Romance

Sign up for Daniel Marques's Mailing List

Also By Daniel Marques

About the Publisher

|  |

---|---|---

# Introduction to the compilation

This compilation includes 5 Bestsellers about Seduction, Dating, Relationships, Sex and Love, and answers all questions women usually have, namely:

* How to get a boyfriend;

* How to find a husband;

* How to get a real man;

* Where to find handsome men;

* How to get a man's attention;

* How to love a man;

* How to please your man;

* How to keep him interested;

* How to keep a man;

* How to tell if he's cheating;

* Why men cheat;

* How to get him back;

* Why men abandon women.

Throughout these five books, a complete understanding of how to be an Alpha Woman is made possible with an analysis of the following topics:

* How to be an Alpha Female;

* Where to find a man and how do you get him;

* The rules of seduction, from attraction to great sex;

* How to deeply understand the game;

* How to seduce and have sex like a Pornstar;

* The rules of love;

* The truth about compassion, attraction and romance.

Passionate readers had this to say regarding the content here provided:

"All women should read this book! It will give you a deep understanding of the game. I have never read a book like this one, it was insightful and extremely informative. I would recommend to others" (Grayle Tompkins);

"Excellent! We all need this information to keep our relationship strong and interesting" (Brock Kennedy);

"I wanted a relationship, but always ended up in heartbroken. To find love, I followed relationship gurus, traveled and meditated, but nothing worked. Gradually, I figured out that my problem comes from the loss of who I am. I want to be a happy and attractive woman, but I was unconsciously being rude and rough to the opposite sex. This book waked me up and I realized that I was exactly the woman no man wants to be with. After applying the principles described about Alpha Women, I started receiving help from male friends and customers and my life gets easier wherever I go. However, this book is not only about playing tricks to get what you want. It's about taking responsibility for our own happiness. Girls, read this book! Embrace who you are and be an Alpha Woman, not for men or anyone in the world, but for yourself!" (Faith Zimmer, CEO of Solar Creation).

|  |

---|---|---

# BOOK 1: Alpha Female: Where to Find a Man and How do You Get Him

Introduction

In a highly competitive world with everyone running for opportunities, an Alpha Female rises above all, by creating her own reality, and that's why "the woman warrior who is armed with wit and courage will be among the first to celebrate victory"(Maya Angelou).

The concept of Alpha Female has been widely applied in magazines, websites, television, advertisements and books to misinform women regarding the ideal behavior they should have. However, the same doesn't happen to the description of Alpha Male, which finds social recognition and consent among experts.

An Alpha Male is often associated with masculinity, confidence and popularity, while the Alpha Female is commonly interpreted as a bitch, feminist, hooker or lesbian.

The discrimination of independent women pursuing their dreams, distorts the understanding of what a woman should be, appear or do, leading to confusion about what men really want. And, while the Publishing, Movie and Marketing Industries profit from the problem with cosmetics and romantic novels, women suffer from the pressure received from peers, relatives and relationships.

Taking this reality into account, a research was conducted in order to understand why women aren't happy and which believes lead to such outcome. At the same time, results were compared with those of women that get more from life and are able to obtain the relationships they always wanted.

An analysis of both situations allows a clear observation of which qualities and behaviors a woman should have, leading to the organization of the most important, based on the success of those that have applied this knowledge to change their life and conquer their dreams.

Among many social myths, the following chapters will allow an understanding of why some women, independently of their looks and personality, can easily marry the best men, while others aren't able to keep their own relationships for a long time.

Special skills are in demand, due to the amount of lies that have been brainwashing the female brain for the past decades. And, although books and magazines about relationships and seduction are easily found, nearly none presents a realistic and practical definition of Alpha Female.

Reality shows that a princess doesn't live happily ever after without the right prince, she'll have competition on the way, he won't choose the best woman and, if she can't actively pursue him, will end up with a frog, which may in the end cheat with somebody else.

Women tend to surpass men in numbers in many social circles, meaning that they risk more if not being competitive. "Life's a Bitch; you've got to go out and kick ass" (Maya Angelou).

Destined to the most determined and smartest women, this book shows how to study men, understand their behaviors and select the best. It's an opportunity to rebuild character, increase self-esteem, gain responsibility and expand in wisdom about relationships.

The choice in agreeing with what this books provides implies the acceptance of the right to chase men and refuse the consequences of not doing so, such as waiting forever for the best to fall from the sky.

"A woman is like a tea bag; you can't tell how strong she is until you put her on hot water" (Eleanor Roosevelt).

The stereotype of Alpha Female

Much can be known about the concept of Alpha Female when researching through magazines, internet and books with dating advices for women. But, there's an evident difference between what's usually mentioned by men, women and experts in Psychology.

* Men see her as an experienced woman;

* Women describe her as a manipulative woman;

* Psychologists label her as a Nymphomaniac.

Among these descriptions, a clear differentiation is made between the women men want or dump. And, only women tend to differentiate furthermore this issue, by talking about those that get married or don't. So, basically, everything can be resumed to marriage. But, can a manipulative woman get married or even be happy with her marriage? Most women would promptly answer yes, while disregarding the purpose of marriage for their life and its impact on the personality. And, it's due to this reason that they don't manage to develop the main qualities contradicting this need, namely, being independent, confident and fearless. On the other hand, if they develop them, may become unable to commit to a man, be flexible about their personal values, be faithful and find compatibility with their partner or spouse. This is why Alpha Females tend to be associated as well with women that cheat or can't maintain a marriage for a long period of time.

Therefore, from this analysis we come to the conclusion that women can't find the exact formula to become an Alpha Female, due to contradictions between all the definitions found.

* Mature for Men;

* Deceitful for Women;

* Unbalanced for Therapists.

Another reason why it seems difficult for women to understand the right perspective is related to their self-image, as it's impossible to think positively about ourselves while being associated with a negative stereotype.

* Men see her as someone that had many boyfriends;

* Women see her as the ideal liar;

* Therapists relate her to a personality disorder.

It's because Alpha Females are more commonly associated with negative perspectives, that false believes became easily accepted by today's society and most women are quick to recognize them as truths, even though they're not:

* Men love bitches!

* Women are bitches!

* Only bitches get married!

Even though the majority may have the best intentions, the fact is that there isn't a good, positive and uplifting, meaning or definition for the purpose of being an Alpha Female. But, above all, there's difficulty in understanding the nature of love.

* Being independent, confident and fearless, before marriage;

* Being compassionate, loving and flexible, after marriage.

Differences between Alphas and Nymphos

When women say or believe that an Alpha Female is a bitch, they're basically comparing her to the same characteristics that could easily be confused by those of a Nymphomaniac. However, there's a distinct difference that must be noticed, and it's the fact that Nymphos are mentally disturbed women, which can't commit to any man or be monogamous by nature, due to their hyper-sexuality or compulsion to constantly have sex with different men.

Science has shown that, at least, 3% of the female population is sexually addicted, but the problem isn't obvious to these women, until they realize these contradictions leading to a more severe mental disease.

* In order to feed their compulsion, they lose love;

* The accumulation of breakups devastates their self-esteem;

* They start manipulating men to avoid being abandoned;

* Lack of love increases the desire for sex;

* Without love, they lose the ability to enjoy sex;

* The less they enjoy sex, the more they need it;

* The more sex they need, the fewer boundaries they have;

* Affairs with men without value, diminishes their self-esteem;

* They fear being found by others, developing paranoia about their secrecy;

* They also fear falling in love with someone that won't tolerate promiscuity;

* At a certain point in time, they suffer personality disorders.

The mental disorder of the Nymphos is interrelated to their promiscuity, leading them to bulimia, anorexia, alcohol or drug addiction and suicide. They end up being trapped in what they've become, namely, resentful, depressed and isolated in their own world. And, their days become a struggle for a constant emotional compensation.

Even though society worships women with Nymphomaniac behaviors, especially thanks to the reinforcement of the major music pop starts, their life is actually very sad, and all the miserable things associated with them aren't a coincidence.

These women live in a painful world, which they try to hide as much as they can, and they're trapped, between the feelings of belonging that sex can bring in a short-term and the impossibility to develop it in the long-term.

The dark side of the Alpha Female

Love can't exist without trust, which will be feared when the one loved brings with him the ghosts of past relationships. This is very likely the reason why suffering and pleasure tend to be interconnected in many modern relationships.

* Women believing they can't have love without drama in their relation;

* The need for sadistic and masochist behaviors to arouse sexual emotions.

Women tend to search for an Alpha status when betrayed and deeply hurt by men in their past, becoming afraid to commit to long-term relationships, as this situation leads to the need for control as a form of ego-protection.

*The right knowledge would demystify the idea of superiority;

* The wrong knowledge promotes polygamy and short-term affairs.

There's only one solution for a woman with a broken heart, or even a Nymphomaniac, and that's to become an Alpha Woman and change permanently her life in a positive direction, namely, by finding love and learning to accept it.

Even though most would choose to seek the help of a professional to receive counseling about relationships, it's possible to independently reach a perfect stage of, not only sanity, but also abundance in love and self-esteem, and it can be gained once the right definition of Alpha Female is understood, or in other words, once a woman realizes that she can be a Super Woman.

The fact is that men may choose to have relationships or affairs with nymphomaniacs or women with low self-esteem, and nearly all have at least one story to tell about it, but nearly none would choose to marry such women, and would definitely advice their friends in such relationships to abandon them, knowing that most of these dreams end in divorce months later.

It's only normal that a woman losing her companion to a kind of Alpha Female from the dark side may see him months later alone and probably asking for forgiveness. One way or another, married or not, these Dark Side Alphas can't love, and that's their real life hell.

They become so good at hiding everything occurring in their relationships that become more easily admired than pitied or hated. But, this manipulative attitude comes from lack of responsibility, which will eventually backfire, once they trap themselves in a life they have to make eternal efforts to keep, while knowing that they can't.

The bright side of the Alpha Female

The only meaningful description of Alpha Females, which only a few women truly know, defines them as healthy, intelligent, kindhearted and well-intentioned.

These women want to know how to get a man, but not any man or in any way possible. They want to know how to understand themselves, enhance their best attributes and conquer the heart of a good man, in order to achieve a life of commitment and happiness in their future.

Everything else about being a woman without matching these basic traits, can't truly serve women in their life but merely feed their delusions

Unfortunately, society has somehow agreed to follow the idea that being Alpha isn't normal, but this is the result of a massive mind-programming promoted by the media.

The relationship dynamic has changed and there's absolutely nothing wrong about being active in pursuing and achieving personal goals in life or in pursuing a man and achieving the ideal romance.

If women are admired for everything they achieve independently with their career, family and friends, the subject of relationships shouldn't be differentiated, and women need credit for accomplishing their goals in having a beautiful and healthy family.

It wouldn't make any sense to admit that women need to be active in everything else in their life, except in conquering love, which they're supposed to be passive about, by never approaching a man.

This wrong idea is leading many, which hold the potential to become amazing girlfriends and wives, to spend their time as single and lonely persons. But, women need to awake for their femininity and pursue happiness by being a full grown woman, emotionally mature and self-conscious.

A few years ago, women fought for the right to vote and use miniskirt, and should now fight for the right to get the men they want, instead of waiting for them to come out of nowhere.

How to build self-confidence

Self-esteem doesn't depend on will and can't be created or believed upon when nonexistent.

A woman should learn to love herself by doing things that make her feel happy and proud. And, this is important to build character, because when women suffer from broken relationships, tend to become emotionally dependent on men due to the need for acceptance, approval and validation.

An Alpha Female doesn't depend on anyone and isn't affected by circumstances because she's independent and builds her believe-system based on her own decisions and achievements in life.

When meeting a man with more knowledge, they're quick in learning from him what they need the most, while preparing themselves if one day they lose him. They'll learn what he knows, study what he is and observe what he does.

This attitude is very different from one in which a woman tends to parasite her self-esteem from the man she's with in order to gain social credibility and validation. Emotional dependence on a man can be very exhausting for him, while putting a woman in a very vulnerable position.

The love from a previous relationship can't be replaced by a new one, but the woman that loves herself won't ever feel unloved. In other words, the less you love yourself the more likely you are to suffer from a breakup. Almost all disputes and fights in a relationship can be traced to this weakness.

Relationships don't work when people aren't loved enough, but a woman without self-love can't ever be loved by any man, and that's why women with low self-esteem tend to end alone.

If a woman feels safe enough and contempt with her lifestyle, she won't be afraid of any confrontation related to her own values, personality or decisions, and will be much more conscious about her needs and requirements, while predicting outcomes before they happen.

Self-awareness also helps in developing the right skills to deal with problems inside a relationship, and that's why probably so many women are turning to Yoga and Meditation to regain a proper balance within their lives.

This kind of awareness, however, isn't found in a gym, studio or guru, but within the right mindset, by creating the habits that lead a woman to the opportunities that can change her life. It implies knowing what she wants and taking actions to get it. And, this is the best definition of what an Alpha Female is, because those that aren't, don't know what they want and aren't willing to take actions towards finding the answers.

If we had to resume the whole idea in one sentence, it would be by saying that an Alpha Female is a woman that knows what she wants and gets it.

The 20 qualities of an Alpha Female

An Alpha Female is a woman with the following attributes or qualities:

* Independent: The Alpha Female doesn't depend on anyone to achieve success in relationships or life, but makes efforts to learn everything she can, in order to maintain such level of independence;

* Accomplished: She's either happy with her life or working hard to achieve goals that can give her a sense of accomplishment;

* Positive: She never complains about her losses or weaknesses, but instead focuses in her best qualities to continue pursuing her dreams;

* Decisive: An Alpha Woman knows what she wants, including the type of man that fits her requirements

* Restless: She'll never be contempt with less than what she truly wants and will face all consequences that such attitude demands;

* Fearless: The Alpha Female loves herself enough not to fear losing a man or any other emotional bound;

* Confident: This type of woman gains pride in loving the life she has and who she became, independently of her background or losses from the past;

* Seductive: Her seductive skills go far beyond any physical appearance or sex-appeal, being able to seduce most men, not only with her body, but also behavior, conversation, voice-tone, eyes, etc.

* Fashionable: She knows how to look her best and enhance the best parts of her body;

* Knowledgeable: These women learn as much as possible and everything they can get their hands into about different ways to seduce, flirt, interact and attract;

* Emotional: An Alpha Female isn't afraid to show her emotions and express her thoughts;

* Aggressive: The Alpha Woman is a leader, she can stop when she wants and demand from others when she needs to, never submitting to anyone's wishes when against her will;

* Discreet: The Alpha Female is focused in her goals and avoids popularity to create the exact image of what she wishes to transmit more easily;

* Flexible: She's an observer and can easily adjust to any social event or group, by analyzing others around her and behaving according to each personality;

* Sophisticated: An Alpha Woman knows well the rules of etiquette in any type of society and will study each carefully, by watching movies and researching about it;

* Modern: The Alpha Female is well-informed about trends and tendencies, in fashion, music, movies, and so on.

* Role-model: She's usually other people's guide in being socially updated, polite, friendly and fashionable.

* Fit: She exercises regularly and participates in sport events;

* Healthy : The Alpha Female wakes-up early in the morning, goes to bed earlier at night, eats fruits and nuts when hungry and avoids having two big meals a day, but mainly meat. She also avoids damaging diets or pills;

* Competitive: If sensing jealousy, she'll not fear being loved or hated, but she'll make sure to be respected and charismatic.

How to get a man's attention

The appearance of a woman should always be in harmony with her physical traits.

In order to accomplish this purpose, a woman should hide the worse of herself while promoting the best.

* If your head is too big, make your hair straight;

* If your face is too big, focus on your physical appearance;

* If you're not tall enough, use high-heels often;

* If you have extra-weight, use darker clothes;

Because men are mainly visual, it doesn't really matter what a woman thinks about herself, if she's able to wear proper makeup, dress well and look attractive.

* A good haircut is worth all the money you can pay;

* Clothes should be bought according to how well they fit your particular style, not their brand or trend;

* A good combination of colors is also very important, and they should match your body type as well as skin color;

* Avoid strong colors, like pink and orange, because men don't like them;

* Seduction is about what fits you best, so don't fear investing on your cleavage, if that's your best attribute.

Moreover, don't be afraid to be feminine.

* Show gracefulness and delicate attitudes;

* Show confidence and be proud on yourself;

* Believe that you're beautiful before anyone tells you.

Self-esteem will help you close the gaps between all the necessarily lessons that need to be learned through experience, and if you act with value and show a valuable image, the rest will follow proportionally.

Where to get handsome men

Geographically speaking, Portugal, Spain, France and Greece, are famous for having the most handsome men in the world, even though they're actually very similar, culturally, genetically and physically. But, with so much emigration, the relation between nations and appearance, may now be more complex than before. Therefore, activities and daily habits may provide a better method for knowing where to find the best-looking men.

Men with good appearance enjoy sports and outdoor activities, reason why they're able to keep fit, but these habits also increase their confidence and self-esteem.

In order to find them, you simply need to join groups that promote such kind of activities, namely, those related to cycling, mountain climbing, canoeing, sailing and martial arts.

Actors, TV Presenters and Models, nearly all do sports in order to keep fit and guarantee their job status, so it's a fact that a good appearance is maintained by having healthy routines.

You can simply search the internet for options available in your area, as many tend to have their own page and promote it to get more members. Nevertheless, remember to keep your attention on something you can actually do or are willing to learn, because some activities can be very demanding.

These options provide a more relaxing environment to meet men than parties, without any pressure beyond the purpose of the workout. Another benefit, is the increase of self-esteem and confidence, while allowing a good environment between all participants, which will make it easier to interact with others.

As Rita Mae Brown said, "lead me not into temptation, I can find the way myself".

The strategy when flirting with men

Women, that don't know or care about analyzing male behavior, rarely assume responsibility for their life and choices, and victimize themselves when cheated, rejected, abused or despised, unaware that they've contributed to such reality.

Paralleled to victimization is believing all men are the same, which allows reinforcing an egocentric shield against self-analysis.

Happiness and success in relationships are more easily obtained by women that know men so well they feel as comfortable among them as if they were with women.

The Alpha Female gains this skill by interacting with men in their territory, and that's why most had more male friends than female when young.

As adults, they continue this practice, by organizing events and activities in which men are a majority, but also by entering their own field, namely, when practicing martial arts, weight lifting or talking about technology, cars, women and games.

Most women would find it as boring as men trying to enter a female world of shopping malls and cosmetics, but that's why they think differently.

The Alpha Female doesn't pay attention to the outcome and uses the fact that she's not knowledgeable to gain sympathy and teachings about those subjects, while studying the male thinking pattern. In fact, they may not have any feelings for all the men they spend time with, but use them to understand the ones they truly want or reach them.

This exercise unveils the differences between men with precise detail and goes far beyond what magazines portraying men as an animal species in need for training and domestication could possible say.

Strategically observing men as enemies, similarly to what military books describe, is positioning women is the worst situation regarding building a relationship, as you can't love those you fear, but it also isolates the best men, as they end up being seen as more unpredictable and feared.

It's not good when women start selecting men that are dumb and unwise, due to their need to control the relationship.

The best men of today's world are feeling forced to change into something they're not, namely by accepting discrimination regarding their intelligence, while posing as more indifferent than they actually are, in order to get the women they want, but can't cooperate in uplifting both into a level of accomplishment, simply because they fear something which is seen as unreal.

The purpose when choosing a man

The most common failure women in trouble commit in their relationships, consists in never realizing the importance of clarifying the characteristics and qualities of their ideal man or in seeing them from a needing point of view, instead of a giving-back perspective. In other words, since a very early age, all women dream about getting married, but they often forget with whom. When asked about why, they refer everything they want to get but rarely what they wish to give. They want to obtain value through the man chosen and gain valuable things given by him as well, but are unaware that such man may not be very different in his own expectations.

An open-minded look at society clarifies the issue:

* Women want a man with money, but only the prettiest get him;

* Women want a man with popularity, but only the friendliest keep him;

* Women want a man with qualities, but only the supportive marry him.

* Women want a handsome man, but only the respectful have his babies.

It's as important what we want as what we're willing to give, because men choose according to their needs as well, and reject when those needs aren't satisfied.

A woman may search all her life for the ideal man and give up, based on the common believe that he doesn't exist. However, you can't find what you want if you don't know what it is, just like you can't reach a destination you haven't visualized or get certain knowledge without finding related concepts.

The only problem with continuous failure is that, although it allows an opportunity to learn about our mistakes, it often leads to misleading believes, low self-esteem and selfish preconceived ideas about relationships that interfere negatively in our attitude towards others.

The most beautiful real-life stories don't end well, because people destroy them with believes they bring from heartbroken experiences from their past.

The method when analyzing men

There are two groups of men:

* Interesting;

* Uninteresting

In each of them, we find the following subgroups:

* Unqualified.

* Intellectuals;

* Sportsmen;

* Artists;

* Workaholics;

The majority of the uninteresting men can be found among the unqualified individuals, while the interesting are seen in all the other subgroups.

Men can be described as interesting, when having a purpose in life occupying their time with uplifting activities, related to the body, mind or soul. But, a man is uninteresting when wasting time with television, games, drinking, drugs and porn or when seeking to increase the number of sex partners. And, while young women may find it thrilling having a relationship with such men, they rarely become the hero of the movies describing them, but often the greedy, selfish, aggressive and destructive bad guy, that cheats, steals their money, abandons their children and hurts their pride.

Most women, conditioned by a huge amount of false believes, end up marrying an unqualified individual, which they then promote to friends as interesting, in order to restore their self-esteem, but Alpha Females always get the ones in the interesting group.

One of the most common assumptions consists in thinking that men should always be the ones approaching women. Apart from what movies may show, in real life, only men with low self-esteem, unaware of any sense of humiliation or pride, will approach women that may reject them in public, but they're a minority, meaning that most women are approached by uninteresting men, while assuming that they represent a majority.

The Alpha Female, on the other hand, aware that the man she wants will never approach her, takes the initiative in the smartest way she can. These women are patient and wise, observing every detail that can guide them in defining a profile related to the subgroups mentioned, in order to quickly plan the right and effective approach.

As women tend to think that men are all the same, they look for a boyfriend in common places, such as clubs, bars and parties, which tend to be crowded with unqualified individuals looking for easy sex without commitment. But, interesting men are found in specific locations and, because they usually don't approach a woman, must be seduced in a specific way. And, due to lack of feminine interference, Alpha Females dominate these territories much easier than any woman would expect.

Where and how to get a man

There are five types of men:

* The Unqualified;

* The Intellectuals;

* The Sportsmen;

* The Artists;

* The Workaholics.

Unqualified

More than knowing what a loser is, a woman should know how to identify one, instead of pretending they don't exist or that their boyfriend or husband couldn't be one.

The unqualified man doesn't have anything specific that may distinguish him from others and is basically among an average of individuals without ambitions or acknowledgment regarding their lack of purpose in life. They often replace the need to do something for a numb feeling of nostalgic laziness and addiction to television, videogames and watching baseball, football, soccer, or any other sport. In worse cases, it also includes getting drunk and drugged with friends. But, because many women with lack of self-respect feel comfortable with such individuals, it's worth explaining how to find them and get one.

They can be seen in common places for social entertainment, such as clubs and bars. The use of questions related to something occurring in present time is enough to start a conversation with them, although these places are also more propitious for approaches between people, allowing a selective behavior.

The challenge consists in managing the approaching, while dealing with those that wish to approach, but the rule says that the more you move around a certain area, the higher the chances of creating the ideal moment to meet someone interesting.

Certainly, the ideal club or bar also helps, and it should be full of friendly, welcoming and happy people, willing to allow you to join them in whatever they do.

Intellectuals

Intellectuals can be found with papers or books in silent and sophisticated coffee shops, bookshops and libraries, usually in a Sunday or Saturday night, as they have difficulties in making friends and be accepted by others.

Most, were probably geeks or nerds when young, keeping a certain self-image from those times. This means that they're very focused in their readings, nervous near beautiful women and unwilling to take initiatives, even when interested in a woman, as they're more passive than any other type of man.

The proper way to approach one requires the setting of a trap, which keeps them from escaping uncomfortable situations, as they often do, even though later regretting.

* If you can find what he's reading by observing him, ask for explanations about the topic, justifying it with an essay you're doing about the same issue;

* If you find him in a library, ask him to help you choose a certain book, while chatting during the process;

During the conversation, ask about his recommendations, as they lack someone that has interests in the same topics to listen what they have to say, and take the chance to invite him for a coffee in a nearby location.

Always make sure you can find an opportunity to ask for the phone number to contact him again, because these men are the mostly shy and lonely.

Don't be afraid for not understanding what they say but don't pretend either. Men like to teach what they know to a woman, but if they notice that she's pretending, they may quickly lose interest and feel disrespected. Men are more logic than emotional, so they won't understand that a woman may lie when making efforts to please them, but believe that she's manipulating them.

Nevertheless, these men often lack experience and need to be taught how to be behave in a relationship. The way to succeed consists in never waiting for them to do anything, as it can be disappointed, but instead telling them exactly what to do.

Intellectuals are very sensitive and tend to show their affection by buying more gifts than any other men, even though it's usually headphones, smartphones, iPads, videogames and books.

They also get easily excited about topics related to UFOs, aliens, the future, superheroes and mythology, which are also their weakness, if you make jokes or criticize.

Appreciate them for their imagination and curiosity, even when not understanding all the meanings and excitement that they portray about an unseen world. That's how the wives of Bill Gates and Steve Jobs married them and became two of the most proud and rich women on earth, after these two geniuses changed the world, just like they had envisioned.

Sportsmen

Men that are into sports, tend to go jogging or cycling in a regular basis, on a Saturday morning or afternoon.

These men are usually alone, as they're self-motivated, and see this activity as multitasking of adventures and exploration. Meaning that, they stop in the best places, to appreciate a landscape, do stretching exercises and observe beautiful ladies, and they often do it all at the same time.

They usually finish the workout around lunch time, as if eating was a hunting prize, so this moment opens an opportunity to spend more time with them. It also means that you don't need to participate in the activity in order to approach one, but simply wait for him to finish it.

Men get confused when women approach them and tend to say stupid things that they later regret, but this happens because they don't have experience in being approached. And, even though women often think that approaching a man diminishes their value, men don't see it in that way, and actually react equally as if they were the ones approaching. A man approached by a beautiful woman, is as nervous as if he was the one approaching her, and will likely do the same efforts to keep up with the conversation. Therefore, the method used to approach has more meaning than the approach itself, and it consists in leading a man into thinking that he's the one approaching.

An Alpha Woman tends to appear less experienced and more fragile than most women, not because she lacks confidence, but because she knows more, namely, the fact that men always want to feel useful near a woman.

In this situation, the Alpha Female, once seeing the man she wants, will do the same activity as him, but on her own, while waiting for the right opportunity to create an excuse that will look natural but attract him to her. If he's stretching, she'll stop near him, and after one or two stretching moves, ask for his help, saying something like, "Hi, can you help me with some stretching routines? I have no idea what to do next".

Men love to lead women by telling them what to do, and if you ever tried to park a car near a man or take driving licenses with one, you know this. But, the Alpha Female knows it so well that she'll use this technique as much as possible to seduce men. Here are some examples:

"Can you teach me to cook?";

"Can you help me open my door?";

"Can you teach me philosophy?";

"Can you teach me self-defense?"

"Can you travel with me to protect me?";

"Can you come to my place when I feel lonely?";

It's important that you learn to build up a conversation by asking questions related to personal believes and information, which can help in creating more intimacy and close the distance.

It would help asking for his number while planning a new encounter, with the excuse of having him teach you new exercises or routines.

Buying weights and asking him to help you learn to use them is also a great excuse to seduce him to your place and build intimacy.

Nevertheless, don't feel frustrated if he refuses to give any personal information, as he may not be interested or have a wife.

If you choose to find this type of man in a gym, choose a group class, namely, martial arts, volleyball or swimming. Most men practicing martial arts aren't violent, especially the ones that practice the most philosophical, such as TaiChi, Kung Fu, Karate, Aikido or Taekwondo.

It may not be as easy to approach a man in a gym as it is outdoors, but it's much more natural, and if the Instructor creates group activities, it's a good opportunity to get closer to the man of your choice. Conversation tends to flow naturally in those moments and soon you'll discover what both have in common, in order to have a purpose to meet outside those classes.

Artists

Artists are often very lonely, mysterious and silent, which doesn't mean they're antisocial.

Most women won't approach an artist, in the fear of interrupting something important that he might be doing. However, if you wait for an opportunity to talk to them, you may never get it, as they live deep inside their own reality. Only the most courageous and daring women end up dating artists, and that's why stories of writers, musicians, sculptors and painters, having affairs with the worse women are so common for thousands of years.

Artists are popular, but not necessarily social, as most tend to be surrounded by people that want to be seen with them and not necessarily individuals they call friends.

* A DJ, for example, seems popular when performing, but is usually seen alone after the show;

* A writer may be known by thousands of readers, but spends most of his time thinking and writing alone in coffee shops that are nearly empty;

* The member of a band, if committed to success, won't have much time for girls, as he'll spend it practicing in a garage;

* The painter and the sculpture can only work in silence, so they're not seen in public places very often as well.

Surely, there are exceptions in all these cases, but they don't represent the majority. In fact, the most social artists tend to fail in their path to success, as they're not committed enough to their work, which requires hours of daily practice and dedication.

Also, know that real artists enjoy nature and being outdoors, near a river, ocean or mountain, late in the morning. You can also find one in the less crowded coffee shops, near quiet parks, working with their laptops and using software you haven't seen before, doing something you can't understand, for hours unstopping, probably listening to music at the same time.

Artists live in the contradiction of wanting recognition while avoiding crowds at the same time, so they do like to be approached, even though not all the time. You must approach an artist when he's alone, because the more people approach him, the less value you'll have for him in that precise moment. This said, the worse moment to approach one, is when he's performing or talking in public.

Artists also tend to do something most people can't understand, and that's empty thinking. In other words, you'll see one in the person observing a landscape for half an hour without a specific purpose.

Approaching an Artist requires a very aggressive and direct attitude, combined with the right words that they need to listen, such as, "I think I've seen you before. Are you an Artist?". A true artist will proudly infatuate his chest and answer yes with a smile.

If you see a man with these characteristics, writing for hours with his laptop, you can directly approach him and ask him if he's a writer, while describing admiration for his persistence. All artists love to talk about what they do and receive recognition for that. But, if his answer is no, you can still continue the conversation with questions about his activity.

Another characteristic that Artists tend to have is good musical taste, so you can approach one by asking him to help you deal with the audio of your laptop and comment on your musical taste. This conversation can follow-up with questions about his musical preference.

Artists are very selective about the people they like to hangout with, because they hate what the majority loves. Therefore, never show them pop music, romantic music, or talk about charts and mainstream taste in music or life. In order to gain the interest of an Artist, you should focus on different things, such as world music or a new band.

Remember that, even though Artists tend to be very critical and direct in their words, they're also honest and always say what they feel, so don't worry when feeling judged or depreciated, because most aren't cruel either, but simply very sensitive.

Try to understand their world and source for opinions, as this will help you rethink your sentences, promoting a better connection between both. Your words should always be uplifting, by talking about what both love the most, as by doing this the communication easily flows into a common ground.

Artists are probably the less predictable and understood of all men, therefore being commonly approached for short adventures and not any longer plans. They're the most experienced with women, but lack long-term relationships in their portfolio. But, they're also the most passionate, committed and sensitive lovers, worth remembering forever.

Your biggest problem when dealing with an Artist won't be his personality, but his ex-girlfriends.

Workaholics

Entrepreneurs, Businessmen, Engineers, Managers, and other experts often working beyond their schedule fit this subgroup.

You'll find them in fast food restaurants and coffee shops near big companies, both in weekdays and weekends, but also in rich areas, strip clubs and massage houses.

Approaching, in this situation, means distracting him from the unfinished work, and this can only happen if you bring relief to his stress.

Women that marry this type of man are usually very well-educated, sensual, friendly, well-dressed and polite. In other words, they represent a highly educated woman that brings order and peace to a stressful life. And, that's why there has always been a clear distinction between VIP prostitutes and the rest, which can also explain why some end up marrying these men.

Men observe reality in different ways, according to their nature, so for Intellectuals sexuality can make them feel nervous, for Artists personality is more significant, for Sportsmen your body represents who you are, but for workaholics, how you look, walk and talk, determines your value as a woman, and they won't waste time in one that isn't of top quality. Their materialistic way of living, tells them that they're worth as much as the woman they're with.

Even though you don't need to be a model to seduce them, you do need to be proud, confident, wise, articulate and persuasive, while enhancing your best attributes. Your goal should be helping them relax, while offering quality-time.

Presenting yourself as a businesswoman or a marketing expert looking for partnership or clients, is the most effective way to gain attention, as they'll assume this behavior as natural. Then, during conversation, notice what's said, in order to take the lead into more personal issues.

Workaholics are very practical and direct, as they don't like to waste time, but this also means that they'll know what they want from you before you decide it yourself.

Among all men, these are the ones who dump women and cheat the most, but only when they don't have any value as wives, as once finding the ideal one, they can be very committed to their relationship.

Movies have conditioned women to believe that these men are the best, so they suffer miserably when chasing them back, as such man won't love or care for a woman that isn't Alpha enough, but also because they are constantly seduced by other women.

Nevertheless, it's worth mentioning that a small minority within this subgroup is honest, hardworking and doesn't have time to meet women or know where to find the ideal one.

Why men approach women

Most advices for women generalize men according to one characteristic, which is often found within a minority, while leading them to a very passive role. However, worse than that, is that these advices forget mentioning how to measure the value of a man according to the same principle. And, that's what confuses women regarding the outcome.

To understand the causes behind the male behavior, you must know the following:

* Proud men with high self-esteem won't approach a stranger, even when stared seductively, because they don't like to risk being rejected;

* The more important the reputation of a man, the less likely he'll risk it for a woman;

* Beautiful women tend to find pleasure in rejecting high-quality men, which makes them feel more apprehensive next time they wish to approach a woman;

* Generally speaking, men don't like to be humiliated, and won't make a move until they can be certain that they won't be rejected, which won't ever happen, unless a woman speaks first.

This said, the kind of man that leads women into a relationship, knows how to behave romantically in order to seduce, but isn't romantic and can't love only one woman. These are their characteristics:

* They'll approach even when a woman doesn't show any interest;

* They usually approach with a gift that can't be refused;

* They know the right words that every woman want's to listen;

* They know how to find the weaknesses of a woman by observing her;

* They know how to flirt, escalate emotionally and induce sexual desire;

* They aren't afraid to use touch and physical approaches.

Thanks to pick-up artists, which tend to be seen as evil by most women, the game of seduction isn't the secret of a minority anymore, and the majority of men are learning how to leverage their results with the right woman. But, this happens, because women don't know how to select men. In other words, games wouldn't exist, if women were as active in pursuing men as they are in pursuing them, and that's why Alpha Females are immune to any game, often choosing men that are out of that scenario.

Alpha Females are usually seen among groups of men, which gives them a bad reputation among women, but they only have relationships with who they choose, and that man is often outside her circle of friendships.

If more women knew these facts, they wouldn't feel ugly, just because hundreds of men look at them without making a move. They would know that false believes are leading them to such idea.

Every single woman is beautiful and unique, but she needs to prove that to herself first, by wearing the right makeup, the right clothes and the right shoes, but also by showing the right attitude and approaching men without fear. Actually, if a man keeps exchanging eye contact with a woman, the interest is obviously mutual, and it won't be affected by who approaches first, even though both will lose an opportunity if none does it.

Romantic movies and cartoons have been misleading women since a very early age and using their desire for a deeper connection with someone to trap within those illusions, eventually leading them to despair, loneliness and bad relationships with the wrong men. But, real life shows that love isn't in the hands of destiny, but our own actions towards creating the opportunities for it to happen. Money won't come if you don't work for it, a trip won't happen if you don't save for it and a man won't fall from the sky if you spend your time at home watching movies and won't take actions to create opportunities, by changing yourself, your behavior and your routines.

A woman must be responsible in creating the life she wants, instead of forcing herself to believe in illusions, as illusions will eventually, sooner or later, crash against the wall of reality and fall into pieces, and those pieces will be tears of remorse, regret and victimization, due to a life of emotional investment in something untrue. "The problem of women is that they get all worried and crazy about nothing and then they marry him" (Cher).

Why women approach men

If a woman makes the first move well and with a clear purpose, and the man likes her, he'll do the whole chasing afterward. Men usually like to help women, so any excuse that reaches this goal, is satisfying to create a bound between two persons.

When having a laptop with you, a good option consists in asking for help related to creating charts with Excel or inserting images on Word. It actually doesn't matter which problem is presented, as men don't like to say "no" or "I can't" to a woman, especially if they find her attractive. Besides, this is a situation in which men never suspect as being related to seduction techniques.

The conversation should then follow with new topics and questions about other issues, including a direct approach to ask for the mobile number.

* "Do you mind if I call you next time I have the same problem?"

* "I won't be able to remember everything. Can I just call you?"

Men will give their number because they love the feeling of being needed, unless they're married or living with someone, and fear bringing trouble to their relationship. Nevertheless, neither should you chase or allow him to chase you too much, otherwise he'll think you're either a psycho or not truly interested in him.

Men don't judge women by what they do towards them, but by comparing them with others. So, they'll suspect that an active woman may do the same with every man, unless you're able to change and adapt to the man you're with in the following days.

* If you meet a man in a club and he calls you the next day, don't go clubbing anymore or don't tell him if you do, unless he invites you to go with him.

* If you change his first insight about your type, everything will seem like a coincidence and you'll be able to make him believe what he can trust you.

The biggest mistake women do, when attempting this strategy, consists in not dressing well or doing makeup next time they meet the same guy, thinking that this attitude will lead them to fall in love. As men are more visual than women, they kill a great opportunity, when doing such thing.

A woman should change her attitude, to match the man she wants, not her appearance, unless she makes herself look even more gorgeous than before.

An Alpha Female is always gorgeous, in her appearance, behavior and attitude, causing other women to feel jealous and men to think about sex, but is sweet, caring and friendly, when spending time with the man she likes, and that's something only he knows, but will make him feel proud of having her with him.

A woman is as special as she makes herself look that way.

How to pass a man's tests

If a woman approaches a man in a club or outdoors, and asks for his number after a few exchanged words, and especially after one night stand, he'll find ways to test her.

* He won't call the next day, to test if she'll go after somebody else;

* He won't call for a few days, to know how much she's interested;

* He may text a few messages, to know what she's thinking.

The fact is most men don't like to chase much, so they won't go after a woman unless she's either a supermodel or gives them some hints that they should.

These tests are more common among highly-valuable men, as they won't waste time in one person, knowing that they have many options available, but also because they need to feel comfortable with a woman first before investing time on her.

A woman knows that she has passed the test, when a man is willing to have vacations with her, far from his friends and ex-girlfriends. Most women aren't patient enough to wait or give proper feedback, without overjudging the whole situation, but when dealing with men that are valuable, this is a must.

During the whole time, showing exclusivity is very important, because men despise women that are competed by others. The best men aren't afraid to lose one woman, especially if they don't have any particular story or connection with her, because she's easily replaceable by others that are equally nice or friendlier.

Therefore, if you like a man, always reply his messages, even when you're not available to meet him. And, don't allow too much time to pass without spending a moment together, as it may be seen as lack of interest.

Men are easily molded by routines, so relationships should move quickly, not slowly, as most women tend to believe.

During the moments spent together, create physical contact and don't be afraid to kiss him first if the time comes but he seems unwilling to take initiative.

The first kiss should be subtle and naive, as he'll need to follow the lead if enjoying it. Otherwise, save your pride by saying sorry.

The situation will never be awkward if the relationship is dynamic enough, and that means spending time together in different places in order to avoid misunderstandings.

Some men don't kiss first, simply because they're not sure of what will happen next, how a woman will react, if it's the right moment, if she likes him or if she'll like him after knowing about his personal life, namely, if he has children already or is divorced. Men aren't good at interpreting emotions and that's why they talk about sex, ex-girlfriends or their mother. In other words, sometimes a woman has to validate herself by doing what a man isn't sure about how to judge.

"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun" (Katherine Hepburn).

How to arouse a man

Talking dirty is certainly the most effective way to arouse a man, and it's relatively easy to do it with a little practice. Remember that "Flirting is the art of keeping intimacy at a safe distance" (Sabina Sesselmann).

In order to do this well, you need to learn to transfer any topic into sexual behavior, while avoiding diminishing his self-esteem. You can start by asking him to talk about his previous experiences or his thoughts about sexual behavior.

* "Do you think people change their personality during sex?";

* "How many women had the pleasure of sleeping with you?";

* "Have you ever had good sex?";

* "Do you think sex can change your mood?";

* " Can you talk on the phone when naked?";

* "Could you read a book during sex?";

* "What's your favorite sex position?";

* "Which sex position do you think I prefer?";

* "Can you think properly when aroused?";

* "Are you getting aroused with my questions?".

If you wish to move the process faster, diminish the physical gap between both, by smiling and touching him at the same time. Tension must be kept in low levels by using flirtatious moves and gestures, along with a friendly and apparently naive attitude.

The most common reasons for a men to resist in this scenario would be if he's a virgin, dating somebody, living with someone, married or uncomfortable with the fact he doesn't has sex for a long time. If this happens, try to understand his limitations and exceptions, without assumptions.

All theories are relative in their application and tend to focus in a known majority, while naturally excluding exceptions to promote a better understanding.

Ultimately, the best method is always the most flexible and reasonable, so try adjusting to the situation in order to guarantee your success.

One night stand

The idea of a one night stand shouldn't be considered under situations in which the outcome may affect your life, meaning that you must avoid it with people already known.

Another important thing to remember is that if it's only about sex, both should be clear about it, in order to avoid emotional turmoil afterward and awkward situations.

Furthermore, as men can easily lose control over their behavior in a sexual scenario, you must remind yourself to lead the situation from beginning to end.

* Don't allow him to do what you don't want;

* Stop him at certain periods to assure your control over the situation;

* Tell him what you want him to do;

* Tell him how, when and where you want to have sex.

As most men are addicted to porn, it's relatively easy to control their behavior by using situations that match their imagination and expectations. Almost all sexual and romantic stories have moments in which two persons end alone in a house, so it's somehow expected to happen when you invite a man to your house or propose to go to his, even if the excuse is very realistic, like helping with a particular situation, such as in dealing with a software installation or TV cables.

Use what you know to understand as much as possible about him, and allow the rest to develop naturally, even though you may have to push it in such direction. "Sometimes you have to be a bitch to get things done" (Madonna).

Alpha Females can be very patient when alone with a man, but they also know when to steal a kiss and become sexual as soon as an opportunity comes.

Internet seduction

Not many people are aware of the advantages in using internet to meet singles, but that's why you need to know how to do it well.

Nowadays, there are an increasing number of individuals using internet to communicate, due to lack of time to socialize and make friends. People are spending entire days online, anxiously replacing their boring lives by a virtual reality in their iPad, Smartphone and laptop. And, once Google-glasses or something similar is used outdoors, Facebook and Twitter will replace reality as we know it, which means texting and profile management will continue becoming increasingly important in the art of socializing, flirting and dating.

Meeting people online implies higher risks but also bigger adventures, while allowing finding someone we wouldn't expect. Most women wonder about where to find a man, because they're nearly all online.

We never had so much population on Earth as now, but never were humans so lonely as well. People spend so much time chatting online that end up forgetting they can meet outside.

The problem with the web is that, like any other, catches people in a network that is more useful for someone else than the ones caught inside. In other words, using the internet to find certain personalities requires a strategic, quick and effective use of the data available. It should include a research based on personal interests, believes and needs.

* Subscribe to websites sending news about parties;

* Subscribe to religious, spiritual and other similar gatherings;

* Subscribe to outdoor and sport activities;

* Search for open seminars and similar events.

If you feel confident with a more direct approach, try the following:

* Post an invitation in a forum, to gather all members in a coffee shop;

* Plan a trip to a relaxing location and invite people to come with you;

* Invite a friend to give a free seminar and plan it for him.

Online dating

If you wish to invest time on dating ads, remember this:

* Search for an interesting ad to reply or post one;

* When answering an ad, ask questions to avoid misunderstandings;

* If you need to send a picture, send one with dark glasses;

* Include enough information to filter undesirable men;

* Don't give excessive details about what you want or need;

* Don't write about marriage, babies or work;

* Focus on hobbies and musical interests to evaluate compatibility;

* 80% of your ad should be related to an activity, not personality;

* keep your ad short and always invite men for an activity with you;

* Be precise about the type of man you're searching;

When using Facebook, Twitter or other similar social networks, do this:

* Search for singles with attractive pictures;

* Contact as many as possible to increase probability of success;

* Don't think or talk about commitment, marriage and babies;

* Mention what you read in their posts to create mutual interest;

* Don't persist beyond two messages without a date invitation;

* Don't use the word date, but rather talk.

* Don't believe or expect anything until you see him;

When dating someone you found online, do the following:

* Don't behave as if he was being evaluated;

* Praise him and don't criticize what he says;

* Smile and act as if you're making a friend;

* Don't expect or allow him to pay the bill;

* If you aren't attracted, make him realize that;

* Take the opportunity to learn more about men.

If you like a man after the first date, do this:

* Invite him to another place after half an hour;

* Ask him to call you in the following day;

* Ask him out if he doesn't call back;

* Don't give up, but allow enough space.

|  |

---|---|---

# BOOK 2: Alpha Female: Why Men Cheat and How to Prevent It

Introduction

The concept of Alpha Female hasn't been so explored and referred to as what happens to Alpha Male. Therefore, isn't easy to find a common agreement about how an Alpha Woman should look like or behave.

As most perspectives taken into consideration portray a negative image of what it means to be active as a woman, most end up waiting, dreaming, forgetting and giving up fighting for their rights. And, as the world evolves and changes, the gap between reality and common believes expands, leading many to despair and suffering.

The need for women to be active and persistent in chasing their happiness has never been so important as now. But, in order to be fulfilled, a woman needs to become responsible for her own happiness.

The role of women needs to evolve with the rest of the world, and even though women have learned this lesson well in many other areas of life, not much has changed in the field of seduction, relationships and love. But, active women take their genes into the next generation, while passive women are being drawn to extinction.

The study of what it means to be an Alpha Female is not only related to behavior, appearance and relationships, or even happiness, but the whole future of mankind, because these are the women that will be ahead of their time.

Nowadays, men tend to become more passive and selective, allowing their behavior to evolve with their new status, which in most cases represents a minority. And, a decrease in the number of men available leads women to problems related to competition between themselves and selection of the best available. Therefore, it becomes important to know where and how to find one, but also keep him and know which is worth choosing and having.

Alpha Females have learned to be smart, quick and effective, in finding and choosing the man they want, not necessarily because they want to, but because they recognize the emergency of doing so, in order to avoid what other women reject. But, they have a clear advantage that won't share with other women, due to their typical competitive attitude, reason why a woman won't ever write a good book about this topic and all the best have been written by men, even though rarely covering a complete magnitude of the Alpha panorama, which as men they can't fully understand.

This book shows the path in the most complete form possible, and many women have succeeded with its application since the first edition was published. But, it's because these same women couldn't succeed with the application of many other bestsellers, that this one in particular distinguishes itself as the most efficient available today.

The Alpha Female

Women are competitive by nature, but the Alpha Female knows that, if others have access to the same power, it will make the difference in being able to keep or not their man, or men. Therefore, if women don't share the truth between themselves, including between friends, it's impossible for the majority to truly know what's true, especially regarding the idea that being a bitch is the right choice to get men.

The obvious difference between women that can't have a boyfriend or get married and those keeping many at the same time or always getting who they want, is more misleading than what it seems. There are many goodhearted and gorgeous women men seem not to notice, but could make them very happy, if found.

The Alpha Female closes this gap, as she knows how to make herself be noticeable by the right men, by understanding the whole dynamic within socializing and seducing. They find a new world of possibilities, by focusing on their own happiness and in achieving a fulfilling relationship.

The rules followed by any Alpha Female can easily be synthesized in a few common principles that no movie or novel will ever totally unveil:

* Loving oneself;

* Dreaming and believing;

* Determining and choosing personal values;

* Always choosing the right man;

* Persisting in getting the desired man;

* Keeping a man forever or as long as she chooses;

* Always being active, even when it seems that she isn't.

There's another characteristic in the Alpha Female that is often disregarded, but tends to be the most important, and it's about seeing a union of five aspects that must be well-balanced;

* Her own personality and the possibility of being who she wants;

* A man that promotes her personality and strengthens her spirit;

* A man that completes her life by promoting her dreams;

* A man she can help, without recurring to manipulation;

* Seeing relationships as a path, not an end to life.

We could resume all these traits by saying that an Alpha Woman is a winner by nature, not depending on external circumstances to build her self-esteem and become fulfilled.

Why women suffer

Women without love suffer from the fear of long-term loneliness, especially when reentering a new relationship. This leads them to develop manipulative behaviors and selfish thoughts, which translate into obsessive control over their partners.

Unless a man is very needy and lonely as well, such situation easily transforms into a war for the main decisions within the following weeks of that relation. And, in the end, as a poison, negative feelings will gradually replace the once positive.

A relationship represents the union of two independent souls, which will transform themselves in that interaction, in deeper ways than the ones perceived by the eyes or the mind.

If we aren't clear about our values and limits, it's very easy to see ourselves entering a fight that wasn't expected.

* Know what kind of man you want and need, and write it in a piece of paper;

* Know what kind of man you'll never accept, and be clear about it;

* Ask a man to match your values, match his or let him go;

* Don't prolong a relationship without happiness and finish it quickly;

* Always choose the man that uplifts your heart the most.

Loving yourself is about realizing what you want from life and uplifts your heart the most, and this is who you are as well. If you can't love yourself, you won't be able to truly experience love or become mature enough to manage such love all your life, independently of how it manifests, because, unfortunately, men tend to express their affection differently from what women tend to expect.

It's true that you may love some men more than others, but you shouldn't love someone else more than you love yourself.

* Never allow any man to disrespect you;

* Don't allow men to change you into someone you're not;

* Keep your personal values, assuring yourself they're positive;

* Choose a man that brings you joy, and leave the one that gives you tears;

* Create boundaries and set limits when required.

And, always admit the possibility of being repeating a self-destructive routine that needs to be changed.

* If you're aggressive, don't blame it on your partner or expect him to solve it;

* If you have weaknesses, work in overcoming them and learn what you can;

* Don't be fat as an excuse, but make efforts in being fit, every day if needed;

A relationship is about two people building a future together in a positive direction, while keeping themselves independent in their values and goals in life. Therefore, love is much more about what you're willing to give than what you expect to receive.

Even though an Alpha Female knows how to be independent and accomplished, she's also the kind of woman that others admire, because she knows how to build happiness in her relationship and make her partner feel loved and proud of her.

Why men abandon women

There are several mistakes women do, that can lead men to cheating and dumping them, or even disappearing from their life. And these outcomes keep repeating in future relationships if not acknowledged and fixed.

Criticizing men: One of the biggest mistakes women do, consists in criticizing the man they're with. Even though the intention may be good, men don't like to feel inferior or unable.

Criticizing men is the exact opposite of attracting them, as the best seduction techniques are meant to make them feel necessary in a woman's life. Therefore, when talking to a man, it's important to be aware of negative words and comparisons. Any advice or suggestion provided to a man, must avoid compromising is sense of manhood, and that's done by not highlighting bad aspects from his personality.

Forcing men to talk about their family: Other mistake women tend to do, regard leading men into talking about their family, especially if they don't feel or don't want to be emotionally attached to their partner.

This behavior is interpreted as being abusive and intrusive, because family tends to be a very private and sacred part of their life, even when the relation with their family members may not be positive.

A bad relationship with his family doesn't prove whatsoever about his character, as nobody chooses the family born with, and not all problems are easily solved with communication. However, they're almost always affected by the dynamic of such relations. And, if the nature of this dynamic is negative, forcing them to talk about family issues, or using them to justify their personality, will have a worse impact on the relationship. This situation will immediately associate a woman with an unwanted reality, leading to an emotional dissociation to protect his ego.

Mentioning children: For men, life is logic and organized in levels, so the topic of children shouldn't be mentioned until both are married, or it will be interpreted as the only purpose of the relationship, which will make him feel used and manipulated. It must be noticed that many men don't want to have children, so this issue should be careful analyzed if important to you.

When single, men see children as representing the loss of their freedom and a reality that forces attachment to a woman they may not want, even though nearly all are happy when becoming parents.

The idea of having children is more easily accepted when they become comfortable with a woman they can trust.

Behaving like a bad mother: Men won't keep or have babies with a woman that doesn't seem to have the qualities of a good mother. Therefore, if they're already married with such woman, parenthood won't be something welcomed.

There's a misunderstanding in society about this topic, as men don't choose women because they look like their mother, but they believe only those resembling her can become good wives and mothers.

The complexity within the choice men make, is that they tend to choose women resembling their mother, even when they had a bad childhood, which in this case leads them to choose and keep choosing women they don't really want.

Refusing to be feminine: The woman that is more highly appreciated by men can be represented in the concept of Alpha Female. She's attractive, feminine, responsible, confident, caring, energetic, persistent, hardworking, kind and wise. This is the kind of mother that men want for their children and the one chosen for marriage. So, a woman shouldn't talk about marriage until she has proven herself worthy.

Showing lack of self-control: Men will always avoid women that show lack of self-control, namely, paranoid ideas, aggressive attitude or hypersensitivity. "If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning" (Catherine Aird).

Being aggressive: Among all the most awful behaviors that lead men to abandon a woman, are crying too much and disproportionally to the situation, shouting and being physically aggressive.

Being childish and immature: Childish behaviors to force him to award his woman with gifts and special favors make her look manipulative and unworthy of becoming a responsible wife and mother.

Showing antisocial behavior: A woman must know how to walk, talk and behave in front of others. But, she should also be responsible for herself and those that need her. This is very important for men, because their social image depends as well on the woman they're with.

Showing bad manners: Some small things, such as eating with your mouth open, farting, walking like a duck and being rude, can make men rethink about their choice. And, if a woman repeats them often, men will think about why they haven't breakup yet.

Being negative: Most men aren't aware of the reasons that make them love or lose interest in a woman, as all they can describe is how good or bad they feel in their relationship. In other words, the more joyful and relaxed a woman is, the better a man will feel in her company.

Being rejected by his family: A man should be proud, not only for being with his woman, but also when presenting her to all his family. So, if a woman doesn't love herself, she will likely and more easily be rejected by his family, which will have a severe impact on his decisions, even though not entirely.

Showing lack of self-love: A woman that is constantly victimizing herself and describing her weaknesses and problems can be very exhausting for a man. He will abandon her just to get some peace of mind.

Why men cheat

Even though cheating is considered shameful when seen with an egocentric approach, it can be analyzed and fully understood from a metaphysical perspective. Here, we notice that whatever is the reason behind cheating, it always connects to a personal sense of freedom. And, because freedom is limited to the conscience of each individual, men and women will likely cheat if feeling trapped inside a relationship.

The notion of being fulfilled inside a relationship may differ between men and women, but for men means knowing that they've chosen the woman they're with. This said, the difficulty in stopping a man from the possibility of cheating, or even in stopping an affair, is related to the fact that women diminish their value furthermore when doing this, while increasing tension between both at the same time. In other words, acts that diminish deliberated love have poor results in attracting back a person that is nearly lost.

Nonetheless, the surveillance that a woman can apply in her relationship helps in understanding more about the weaknesses that are present and fix them on time. Men won't cheat if they know their woman is the best available, but in many cases, they tend to do it, due to a need for emotional compensation that they can't find in the woman they're with. "In nine cases out of ten, a woman had better show more affection than she feels" (Jane Austen).

Men need everything in one person, namely, comfort, sexuality, wisdom, honesty, among other qualities, that aren't always found equally. But, when women change after having what they want, there's also a tendency to detach themselves from the responsibility of continually improving their love life.

Choosing the wrong man for the wrong reasons: Women that recognize their difficulties in controlling a man, tend to provide him limited freedom, as if they were releasing a lion in a wild park with a fence. But, when a man wants to cheat, he'll always find a way, and there are many those that, even though loving their wives and keeping the same marriage for years, cheat as much as possible, whenever they have the chance, while presenting the best social disguise imaginable. In fact, they often use marriage to protect their social image, while attracting women willing to have sex without commitment.

These men can commit, marry and have children, but they'll always cheat, therefore, in this situation the only thing that can prevent such outcome, consists in evaluating his profile to know what kind of person he truly is.

Not allowing an unhealthy relationship to finish: Most men will cheat if their relationship isn't healthy and fulfilling enough, but they're either afraid to end alone or the woman they're with doesn't allow the breakup to happen.

Allowing a man to feel frustrated for a long period of time certainly increases the probability for a breakup or cheating to occur, but in most cases the cheating is just an excuse to breakup with a person, because men rarely know how to do such things.

Buying his affection with sex: Trying to win a man back with sex, will lead him to believe that sex is the only valuable thing in that relationship. But, he will continue searching for emotional compensation in another.

Not allowing enough space: When a relationship isn't well, men need space to think and relax. However, during these moments, if they have too much freedom or if the person they have problems with chases them, cheating is more likely to occur. In other words, men recover their manhood by recovering their freedom, and there are certainly risks when this happens, even though they can't be avoided. But, if a man needs to spend too much time alone or far from home, a woman is already losing her territory.

Giving reasons to cheat: A woman should avoid making negative comments, while focusing in the positive things a man does. Because, the more a man is criticized, the more reasons he has to cheat. And, when this happens, changing appearance to look better or sexier won't change the outcome.

Not sharing enough affection: Cheating, in a man's brain, is related to lack of affection and respect from the person they're with and lack of sexual interest is just one more reason to justify it. Therefore, the most important thing when avoiding cheating is making sure he's committed in an emotional level. A woman must be respected and appreciated to avoid being cheated.

How to tell if he's cheating

In modern times most women don't believe in honest men anymore and assume all cheat, but there are more men that don't cheat than those that do. However, most women only know one type of man, and very few stop to think about it and acknowledge it, especially after being cheated.

Reality isn't as simple as what movies portray and a good cheater won't give you any clue about his actions. In fact, they behave like an Elite Spy, specialized in making a woman feel stupid by suspecting them. They're so good in believing what they're saying that, sometimes, even if a woman has all proves they can still make her feel confused about the truth. A relationship with such individuals is truly insane and devastating to the mind of a sane person. Nevertheless, the signs are clear and easy to prove by following certain methods of observation.

Showing the obvious to hide it: The cheater matches the profile of one particular type of man, and they're very good at hiding their actions. Sometimes, their strategy is so good that they don't even need to make efforts to hide it. They'll say something like, "If I show you how I behave with other women, it's because I've got nothing to hide".

Providing misleading clues on purpose: The cheater will always throw several clues to mislead others, namely, by inviting different people to their house, offering their house-keys, offering flowers, constantly sending mobile messages, calling every night, and everything else he can remember, in order to assure the woman he wants to keep that he's not cheating. However, the non-cheater does exactly the opposite, and won't make efforts to keep a woman. So, they're often the target of suspicion with such attitude. They seem not to care, not because they have other options, but because they take their relationship for granted. But, only a committed man would think about his relationship as being safely guarded.

Mentioning the right words too fast: Cheaters are experts in cheating because they have experience, so they know what women want to hear and how to make them feel safe.

Reacting with confidence: A man that doesn't cheat will be confused when someone suspects him and angry if a woman insists in her suspicions, but will do his best to prove himself, if fearing to lose his relationship.

Fearing sharing his personal life: Men that don't cheat leave their life open for women to check whatever they want, as they don't have enough experience in hiding things. But, cheaters are careful about leaving any personal object, such as keys, wallet or mobile near a woman.

Coordinated routines: Cheaters never forget a woman's needs, so they'll call his girlfriend or wife, before and after having sex with someone else. On the other hand, men that don't cheat are so clumsy, that may even say to their wives that they're partying, if that's what's happening when receiving her phone-call.

Becoming aggressive: The cheater will become aggressive if a woman has proves of what he does.

Not picking-up the mobile immediately: He'll never answer his mobile in crucial occasions and moments.

Being cynical: Cheaters aren't nervous when presenting their wives to their lovers, and may even get a feeling of superiority in such moments.

Shielding a confrontation with questions: He'll stop coming questions by asking back something else, or even the same question. They may also talk about something else that has nothing to do with answering what was asked.

Breaking a routine to prove a lie: Cheaters may, in one night, come earlier than usual, or call late at night to prove that they're in the office after their working hours. But, this is done only once in a while, as in other moments the same rule applies.

Calling you crazy: The most common reaction of cheaters consists in calling those that accuse them of being insane.

How to stop an affair

Once a man cheats, there's not much to do apart from deciding to let him come back or go away.

The main thing to take into consideration isn't the cheating but the reasons behind it, as very often they justify a repetition of the same behavior in the future.

He doesn't see value in you: A man cheats when his partner doesn't seem more valuable than any other woman, which can only be solved if significant changes are made to the emotional dynamic of the relationship.

If a woman proves herself worthy of being loved, men will refrain from cheating.

He has emotional problems to solve: The personality of a man tends to describe more about who he is than his past experiences, so it's important to know how his past relationships were in order to identify certain behavior patterns. Then, you can either try to help him or ask him to see someone who can.

You've cheated first: Never give the idea that you've cheated him before or even other men, otherwise the excuse to cheat would be obvious for him. But, if he already knows about it, then only by assuring him of your commitment could you solve the problem, even though the shadow of that past will always remain, and not all men are able to deal with it, especially if they're jealous.

Relationship Breakup: Breaking up may be the best solution to either force the affair to stop or avoid further conflicts, as in most cases the two things are related. In other words, if a relationship ends because of an affair, then the affair becomes the new relationship, and it won't last if not meaningful.

How to compete with Alpha Females

A competition with Alpha Females must be seen in three different grounds:

* Personal - Accepting the Challenge;

* Interpersonal - Exchanging Feelings;

* Competitive - Seduction with Strategy.

Accepting the challenge

The Alpha female is usually the most feared among women because she can easily beat the competition and, sometimes, even steal an engaged man before his wedding.

Some do it to prove their superiority, but others because they've been hurt in the past by a man they lost to another woman.

In the worse cases, they'll return to a man, only to stop his chances of ever being happy, because most are actually jealous of the happiness of others. These women tend to lose interest very easily after achieving their purpose, but they represent the dark side of being an Alpha Female.

As anything else related to power, it doesn't change the nature of a person, so an evil woman with power will become very destructive, even towards herself, while the opposite will lead her to marriage with the man of her dreams.

The worse of the Alpha Females, are also immature and selfish, and suffer from specific mental disorders, that often reflects in a multiple personality disorder, bulimia or anorexia. Women with mental disorders may develop the ability to conquer the opposite sex for self-gratification, but this competence doesn't say everything about being an Alpha Woman, as there are many other Alphas that are healthy and mature, and will avoid men that are inside relationships already.

Nevertheless, seducing men that are already in a relationship, represents a test that allows a married woman to know how truthful and stable her relationship really is.

Exchanging Feelings

The minimum thing to do when a problem arises within a relationship is to discuss it, or at least try in the best form possible. You can start by talking about what you feel, while leading your partner to think about a hypothetical future if a breakup happens.

Meanwhile, you should allow him to express his frustrations, while analyzing what can be done to solve the problems presented.

Sometimes it's possible to solve relationship issues and sometimes it's not, depending on the capability that both have in clarifying needs and paths to reach them.

The mind manipulation of a skilled seducer may confuse a man with unclear behaviors that aren't easily understandable, and that's why it's so important to make him become aware of what's happening. There isn't any need for confrontation and doing it may not result in anything useful.

While most women would see cheating, or the interference of another woman, as something to eliminate, it only happens because the relationship was already too fragile, and that's the main issue to discuss.

A clear and honest conversation about the foundation of the relationship and its main values is enough to see if it can persist or not, independently of what's occurring. The interference of another woman must be seen as a symptom and not a cause. So, there's no need to talk about her to study the situation. But, the consequences of such path must be made clear and followed.

You should assume responsibility for the situation, while making him do the same, without ever accepting any lie.

Remember as well that you don't need to see it in order to know what's happening or may happen in the future. That's not how criminals are sentenced to jail and that's not how justice is made. Also, don't sacrifice a whole life because of a few years.

You must do your best within personal limitations, and your partner must be willing to cooperate. If he doesn't, when a woman is out of the way, another will come to replace the previous, and you'll spend an entire life in fear.

It's not worth to lose who you're not because of someone else. The seed of a relationship is fed together, not by one person only. So, if you can't trust and build honesty between both, there's no root strong enough for the tree of happiness to grow.

Tears and despair solve nothing and closing your eyes to evidence just kills you faster, starting with your own soul, your values, believes and self-esteem.

Seduction with strategy

Knowing how to apply a good management of time and space allows a better application of any strategy.

* Make sure your lover spends more time with you than anyone else;

* Share activities with him that helps both believing in a common happiness;

* Don't show fear in losing him, because this increases such probability.

Alpha Women are patient, and that's one of the main differences between them and other women.

If the other woman is too manipulative and needy, he'll more likely develop stronger feelings for the one that shows more understanding and willingness to share life.

* Put efforts in little things that are meaningful, such as sharing a meal or a breakfast;

* Show interest in his favorite movies and hobbies, and participate in them;

* Find what he loves the most and help him in what he needs;

Most women may think that appearance is what makes the difference in seducing someone, but it doesn't have much significance to a mature man. Sharing emotions is what assures the ultimate difference to him, when deciding which woman to choose to spend his entire life with. And, he'll choose the one he can identify with and makes him feel more comfortable. This is why focusing merely on techniques to catch and keep a man won't guarantee any success.

However, what a woman may see as failure is actually just a natural flow of life, as we adjust to a reality that fulfills our inner desires the most. In other words, some souls are meant to stay together and others aren't. And, this is why some women won't ever understand why men may choose an uglier woman to spend their life with.

The prettiest women tend to invest too much trust in their appearance, while neglecting the importance of their personality and their behavior in a relationship, therefore decreasing their potential to attract love into their lives.

This said, we should forget the idea that Alpha Females are 1,80cm tall, blond, with blue eyes and coming from Russia, as, they can be little fat women that don't even know how to walk in high heels.

How to keep a man

If someone doesn't want to love you, let him go, especially if there's a clear and reasonable explanation for it that can't be fixed or changed! Respecting your happiness is also about knowing how to respect the path in life of others.

Everyone is free to live their own life as they want, and trying to keep someone against his own will shows lack of respect towards that person, but also selfishness. And, even though love is often selfish, it's also about knowing how to let go.

Tears heal the wounds and pain will prove we're alive. There's always someone out there to love and to give us love, but real love can always and only emerge from real feelings of compassion.

Relationships end because the right person wasn't found and breaking up represents an opportunity to restart. There's a right man for each woman, and he's the one that she can make happy, while imagining a bright future together.

A perfect relationship allows the reinforcement of both common and single dreams. When a man is proud of his spouse or girlfriend, will be afraid to lose her, restrain from hurting her and will likely marry her. But, the opposite leads to an undesired outcome.

When a woman brings hell to her relationship, by using spiteful words about the personality, body or behavior of a man, or even by ridiculing him, the risk of destroying the relationship is much higher.

The golden rule for a fulfilling relationship consists in mutual respect and understanding, and this is what we can prove to be real love.

Real love is a path of learning that never ends, in time or under any circumstance, namely, when there's no sex or both loses an attractive appearance, but also when both disagree on important issues. Real love is much more about being wise in dealing with emotions and the personality of your partner.

The reason why it's so difficult to identify an Alpha Woman, or Man, is because the best actually got married with a partner they love.

How to judge men

There are four ways to easily judge a man:

* Behavior;

* Communication;

* Appearance;

* Attitude.

Behavior

The best way to judge a man accurately isn't by analyzing what he says, but observing what he does. "All great lovers are articulate" (Marya Mannes).

The ability to observe men is an art that needs practice and personal development, as it requires the ability to interpret and manage the art of giving feedback or proper communication.

Alpha Women know how to apply the law of cause and effect in their relationship, and that's how they trap men into proving the truth.

The following are the basic rules of such practice:

* Immature men observe everything and can't stay in the same place for a long time;

* Mature men are comfortable with themselves and don't care about consequences;

* Mature men don't chase women, but immature men do;

* Immature men become aggressive and impatient when alone;

* Mature men cultivate the art of being alone, by appreciating quiet places;

* Mature men are committed to their work and focus on what they do;

* Immature men are easily distracted and prioritize entertainment in life;

* Immature men have difficulties to express their wants and needs;

* Mature men can clearly describe their goals in life and what they want;

* Immature men don't talk about themselves, but mature men do;

* Mature men are able to laugh about themselves.

All these observations can be complemented by an analysis of the body language presented.

* Men that avoid gesticulating, lean backwards and cover their mouth when talking are usually more dishonest;

* When men open their hands and put them in front of their body while talking, it means they're being honest, especially when leaning forward;

A significant amount of positive signs helps in identifying openness, honesty and willingness to accept commitment, while the opposite should be carefully noticed.

Communication

When a man talks about his previous relationships or family, it means he feels comfortable near the person he's with, while unconsciously seeking for approval.

If this approval comes, he gets a sense of belonging that increases attraction.

Accomplished men, in particular, talk about themselves and their achievements, not to show off, but to share their interests. And, they expect to see a common line of interest in the woman they're talking with.

Only men that are frustrated with themselves and their life, will seek for approval with criticism. They'll also control the communication with personal questions, to avoid being noticed regarding the fact that they have nothing interesting to say.

The proper way to talk to a man consists in knowing when to interrupt him and learn to search for common interests in things that you both can communicate about with a smile. In fact, only compassionate and kindhearted men will smile without effort and try making you smile with positive comments.

Appearance

The dressing style of a people tends to represent their lifestyle and values. As an example, men with high self-esteem are careful about the way they look, because their job usually depends on their appearance. It will be difficult to see piercing or tattoos in these men.

Shoes are also part of how someone dresses, and it's relatively easy to know how someone perceives himself by just looking at his shoes. A man's mind is as clean as his shoes, but, he's as mature as the style he wears.

Nevertheless, we must also always analyze the context of each observation, as men also dress according to the occasion. Important individuals and artists, when in public, enjoy using casual and very informal clothing, in order to avoid catching attentions. In such situations, a balance between the upper and lower part of the body, in color and tendency, will allow determining the rest.

Normally, people wear clothes and shoes that match a certain style and color, and they follow a particular line of thought, which is determined by their personality.

Attitude

The first thing to analyze in a man is his posture.

High self-esteem men walk straight while looking forward, but low self-esteem men walk with a leaned posture, while looking towards the ground.

The next thing to notice is the expression in a man's face, as mature individuals tend to look serious but immature men feel insecure near a woman. Smiling is very often a sign of fear, and men without confidence smile more.

Thirdly, a wise man walks like he's roller-skating or his body is sliding, but a rude man has a heavy walk, and shakes his shoulders as if his feet were guiding the way.

Finally, smart men typically observe their surroundings when walking, while others behave as if their mind was the only true world.

From this perspective of analysis, it's relatively easy to know which words to expect, as they'll follow a match with these methods of observation.

How to attract an Alpha Male

There are three steps to attract an Alpha Male:

* Step 1 - How to catch an Alpha Male;

* Step 2 - How to adapt to an Alpha Male;

* Step 3 - How to love an Alpha Male.

How to catch an Alpha Male

Games leading to strategies and better skills in searching for the right companion tend to guide us into contexts where other Alphas share our space and time. It's only natural that along the way we may occasionally meet other Alphas, both women and men. But, it's also possible to fall in love for another Alpha.

In these situations, the best attitude consists in changing from an active profile into a mix of passive and active, according to the situation presented.

Alpha Males become experts for some specific reason related to their past, usually because they were hurt or humiliated by other women. So, most of the times, analyzing women is for men much more related to a defense mechanism, as they easily discard their techniques once achieving their goal. They learn to observe and learn in order to avoid the pain of failure when dealing with women, and it's easy to recognize this pattern by understanding where their interest in learning seduction skills comes from.

This said, when a woman shows a superior attitude, they easily categorize the situation as a challenge for control, and either accepting it or not, won't choose to maintain a connection with such woman. Therefore, the combination of passive and active attitudes consists in adjusting to their behavior and words, without trying to gain advantage.

* Plan strategies for future encounters;

* Know well the terrain in which the next encounters will occur;

As an example, when invited to a specific location, be prepared to refuse it with an excuse, and always provide alternatives that will lead him to places where he feels most vulnerable and unprepared. Last minute changes can help in achieving this goal, even though he may react with frustration and anger when persuaded to follow you.

The main technique here, consists in never allowing him enough time to plan whatsoever or adapt to new situations, as it will provide opportunities to study his behavior more easily without the need to be active about it.

* Observe his behavior, when leading him to certain situations;

* Lead him emotionally, so that he can feel a different type of attachment;

* Make him feel that you're a different type of woman;

* Make him believe that he always has the power of choice;

* Control him unconsciously, by providing suggestions and hints.

* Allow uplifting experiences to occur, so that he doesn't feel frustrated;

* Make him learn to respect you, by being positive and caring;

* Make him treasure the connection that both of you have.

The proper combination of all these techniques will lead him to the spell of being in love, which will only last if it's real enough.

If he falls in love, he'll open himself more, by sharing his thoughts and feelings about the relation with you. At this point, you should take the opportunity to gradually abandon your game behind, become more natural and allow love to grow.

How to adapt to an Alpha Male

The difference between Alpha Males and other men is that the first need reasons to chase a woman.

* Leave him in confusion about what to do next;

* Never justify your behavior.

The need to understand women is exactly what fascinates Alpha Males in the game of seduction and, the more mysterious a woman is, the more value she has. But, remember that he's also a human being, therefore, focus in helping him in knowing how to love you without any games, while leaving your own games behind.

As some will and others won't, be prepared to leave him, if he's afraid of commitment, otherwise you'll suffer in such relationship.

There are two types of Alpha Men to take into consideration:

* The Naturals;

* The Professionals.

Professionals study women and know how to attract them, but Naturals often have no idea why women choose them and easily lose their ability in time.

A Natural can easily be changed into someone different, as being an Alpha is mostly a result of his education, past experiences and culture. Latinos are good examples, as the cultures of countries such as Portugal, Spain, France and Italy, tend to push men into certain behaviors and attitudes, necessary in order to be accepted by their peers and women of their countries, in the consequence of being socially rejected and disrespected if they don't. On the other hand, the man that has built himself into an Alpha knows well the traps of a bad relationship and understands the meaning of high quality and low quality women, and he'll treasure more the one that is intelligent, honest and emotional, instead of one that is needy or manipulative.

It's a known fact among Alpha Men, that the most knowledgeable usually become a victim of their own game, by finding a woman they truly love. Whoever, there are those that haven't found such woman, or have been hurt so often that ended up building an emotional wall, which leads to refusing any long-term relationship.

An Alpha Woman should always remember her limits and be ready to leave, if a man doesn't show any affection, which is better than developing pain and resentment later in time.

Wisdom in life and relationships is much more about knowing when to accept and let go within the right timing, than to conquer everything all the time. Sometimes to lose is to win, while winning can mean losing part of ourselves.

How to love an Alpha Male

In order for love to occur with an Alpha Male, you should always keep advantage in the process of developing a fulfilling relationship, while gradually letting go the control of it, so that in the end both can experience true love without any more games.

This is the only way to have a meaningful relationship that can transform itself into something better through years of happiness. "One can't be static in love all the time as it changes over time" (Julie Andrews).

Alpha Men can change and be changed, but the direction of such changes must be positive and beneficial for both in order to occur. If one or both insist in maintaining the game of seduction beyond the starting of a relationship, the addiction to obtaining power over the other and the wild sex of making up after a fight, will quickly develop into resentment and suffering, which will consume, just like a disease, the development of attachment and love. In time, such dynamic will destroy common dreams and deteriorate the existing connection.

There's no compatibility between love and war or in hating someone we want to love. Therefore, if an Alpha Man refuses to abandon his games of power, it's wiser to leave him without second thoughts, as usually these men have allowed their games to take control over their personality, ending up with personality disorders.

Real life shows that healthy Alpha Men, always end up with the girlfriend other men want or a wife.

Trying to change an Alpha Man that refuses it, usually leads to more pain within the relationship with such man. And, if a woman doesn't obey this rule, she'll face hell, because that's what happens when the amount of love developed in a relationship becomes poison, which kills slowly, and in the end, damages our soul permanently.

Games exist to teach us to adapt, and not to be followed into a complexity that inevitably leads to insanity, commonly and at least in the form depression.

Playing the game

The most experienced seducers know that seduction is a game without fixed rules or strategies, but with unbreakable values. And, those values depend on each individual.

Someone with unclear principles can easily be manipulated into an experience of emotional turmoil and obsessions. And, this is why a person needs to define what's desirable or not, in order to learn to say no.

Our values represent a personal territory to which we root our behavior and thoughts. Therefore, if we doubt them, an open path for manipulation and pain will show our deepest weaknesses.

Others may fight them at beginning, through well planned strategies to conquer our emotions and change them. And, intentionally or not, a person that doesn't respect you, will try to manipulate you through words that can conquer your heart. Through the heart, the brain can be accessed, and that's when everything can happen on command.

You can think about your brain as the North American CIA and your emotions as its spies, because if one spy is caught, he'll then work as a counter-spy against your mind. A person will try to access your brain with the intention of manipulating it, if he does the following:

* Uses your own words or similar;

* Repeats your phrases or structures used in phrases;

* Shares with you common dreams;

* Leads you to imagine a future for both;

* Takes opportunities to help you with your own problems;

* Uses your family, positively or negatively, to reach for your feelings.

Wise and experienced seducers, all know this well, so they don' fear what they can see, but they do fear falling in love for such people.

Love blinds us from the truth and destroys our capability to see things clearly if the one loved one isn't honest and doesn't have good intentions. And, this is the main reason why it's so important to know how to leave a painful relationship as soon as possible.

When a person falls in love, everything complicates, as it becomes difficult to stop thinking about the lover, leave that person and refuse him when coming back, like sailors that can't resist the chanting of the mermaids. In this situation, friends and relatives tend to do worse, with sentences such as:

* "Accept that you love him";

* "Don't give up when you love";

* "Love him till he changes";

* "Love only comes once in life".

These are bigger traps than the ones produced by the mind, but pain will always be just pain. If you're suffering, you can call it love or poison, but the fact is you're destroying yourself for an addiction.

The best attitude to have in such moments consists in learning to love oneself, while regaining independence and moving forward in life without looking back.

Knowledge is about the ability to see more, and not necessarily the power to conquer whosoever enters our life, so when knowing what's seen, we don't need to think twice about what's happening.

Alphas are wise enough to learn from experience, and that's also the way they've followed to learn what they know.

The most important rule, when entering the territory of seduction in the highest challenging level possible, regards keeping a personal integrity and commitment to person values, as time will do the rest.

Due to the development of their personality through interaction with others, Alphas become good lovers, and that should be enough to bring a sense of confidence in any situation and towards the future, whatever may happen.

"When faced with a decision always ask "what would be the most fun?" (Peggy Walker).

|  |

---|---|---

# BOOK 3: The Rules of Seduction: from attraction to great sex and fulfilling relationships

Introduction

Although most books about seduction are written specifically for men or women, this makes the difference, as it explains how the rules of seduction apply equally for both in different contexts of reality. Therefore, it represents an opportunity to study the basics of any kind of technique in this field.

What's here referred as "he" or "she", can always be exchanged between genders, as everything can be adapted according to the situation and the persons involved.

The purpose of the study presented is the observation of dynamics in relationships, with an understanding of how one thing leads to another, namely, seduction and sex, or communication and love.

While showing the rules of the whole game of seduction, the knowledge provided here, guides the reader towards finding an ideal partner, and live a relationship where positive feelings and experiences can be shared among two lovers.

Value

"It's not enough to conquer; one must also know how to seduce" (Voltaire).

There are three forms of increasing your inner value and confidence:

* Clothes;

* Personality;

* Conversation.

When applying these principles you can, not only increase your value, but also show it to others and increase their attention towards you.

In a first stage of attracting a companion, your main purpose is to attract the attention of others, make them realize you exist, and allow them to talk and think about you. And, once in their mind, their energy and thoughts will be directed towards you, which will facilitate the attraction dynamic.

Most people fail in seducing, by allowing themselves to excessively focus in this first stage, as in doing so they lose the ability to continue the game.

This first stage is important, but it's not all. Most women focus only in how they look and can, by doing so, attracts many men. But, after a first approach, everything else is determined by how they behave, and that's how they determine the kind of man that will stay or abandon.

Visual attraction is just one part of the process and not the most important. Also, much can be said about this first stage. To start with, the way you visually seduce, will determine which personalities you'll be attracting, but also what you're saying about yourself.

If what you show and who you are doesn't match, you'll decrease your chances of finding an ideal partner, as those you'll attract will lose their interest once they notice you don't satisfy their expectations.

One of the rules to make this game continue without failure consists in creating a perfect coordination between all its levels, which is easier with self-honesty. In other words, it's about allowing the other to feel happier in knowing more about you, by making the outcome meet the desirable need and reducing confusion at the same time. But, the rule applies to both genders:

* If I look romantic, behave romantically and am indeed a romantic person, the one attracted by this idea will feel happy to have me, because it matches the expectation;

* If I look romantic, but the intention is merely having sex, the one attracted to me will gradually loose interest;

* If a man looks sexual, behaves sexually, and is just into having casual sex without commitments, he'll attract the most horny girls, the nymphomaniacs and the ones that are eager to cheat on their boyfriends, the unhappy girls, the lonely girls and, as a resume, all those that, as him, are just after casual sex;

* If a man looks sexual, but is romantic, will attract many girls after casual sex that will end frustrated with the fact that he puts too much emotions and feelings into a conversation, abandoning him before or after the first night together.

These principles interact in a perfect synchronization of different traits related to our personal magnetism. And, others won't see each of these parts separately, as this is how the human brain functions. They'll only be able to perceive the person as a whole. So, by combining all these parts perfectly well, you'll show charisma and uniqueness, while increasing your inner power to attract the chosen partner.

Appearance

"You can seduce a man without taking anything off, without even touching him" (Rae Dawn Chong).

Starting with the clothes, there are two things to pay attention:

* Design and cut;

* Colors.

Regarding the cut, we must be aware that not every kind of clothing fits anyone.

Drawn by fashion tendencies, most people tend to dress similar clothes, although they're not meant to fit all kind of bodies.

When choosing clothes it isn't about how fat, slim, short or tall you are, but, in essence, what fits you or doesn't. Basically, you must be aware of how you feel inside those clothes, and it doesn't really matter the brand or how expensive a shirt is, but how good it looks on you.

* Try what you like;

* Try what you want to wear;

* Feel comfortable in wearing what you want;

* Don't follow what others tell you to wear;

* Don't follow updated tendencies in dressing.

Then, see yourself in front of a mirror:

* Do you like the result?

* Do you feel sexier?

* Do you feel that you look more attractive?

If not, keep moving forward by trying other types of clothes.

Woman or man, finding what suits you best, requires hard work and research by doing plenty of shopping. Some like it, while others don't, but the good news is that once you find your style and get used to buy what looks good on you, it becomes faster and easier to know where to go.

Don't be surprised if finding what's perfect for you in the least likely places with the least expected prices. If you find a t-shirt in the nearest supermarket that is just perfect for your body, buy it! In the end, people don't really care about the brand or the place where you bought something. They'll just notice how good and attractive you look and ask for where you bought it if jealous.

The same happens with anything else, such as jeans, skirts, dresses, etc. There's no specific rule to follow as it merely requires personal experience and persistence in finding the most suitable clothes to wear. There are large size women who are able to look super sexy and attract men, just by using clothes that hide their worse and promote their best, therefore matching their bodies perfectly, and, the same applies to men.

You may not be in perfect shape, but you can wear a shirt that makes you look like you do exercise every day. As for what's related to colors, there's no such thing as good or bad colors to wear, as it depends on each individual. The combination of colors with body type may result in many different emotions emerging in the ones who observe us. A black dress can make someone appear sexy, depressed, shy, non-attractive or mysterious and interesting, according to who wears it. Again, there's no specific secret to this. The shape of your face, your eyes, your hair, your body, your skin color, all interact with the color of a dress. So, while some may look sexy wearing exotic bright colors, such as light purple and orange, others seem silly and irritating to the eyes when doing the same.

After finding the colors that match us, there's also the question of wearing them or not. If realizing that we look good in those colors and it increases our inner confidence, we should proceed in wearing them, otherwise, we should try others in which we feel comfortable with.

However, if we look good in certain colors but are too shy about wearing them due to our habits, we can adapt slowly to it, by using these colors only in certain moments and until we feel comfortable. After this stage, we'll feel confident enough to wear them more often.

As an example, we can mention pink shirts for men. Some may be afraid to wear them, if believing that it makes them look gay. But, if pink color looks good in a certain man, the gay thought on others won't stop him from looking attractive.

Preconceptions of what is for whom and which colors mean what don't really matter in the issue of seduction, because if you look great and different, you can always seduce. Seduction is more powerful than preconceived ideas.

Finally, it's important to mention that, if you want to seduce, you must have something that nobody else has, namely, clothes and colors that aren't common. It helps in becoming noticeable and you do want people to notice you for the right motives. But, this uniqueness must be subtle, so that people may see you as a whole and not only for what you wear.

Some individuals try catching attention by using extremely strong colors or excessively provocative dresses that make others focus on their body. But, this is often the result:

* People won't truly care about that person;

* Some individuals will approach only for sexual purposes;

* Allowing others to believe that he or she looks ridiculous.

Personality

"Change your thoughts, change your life" (James Allen).

The secret to create value with personality consists in talking about yourself and your life as if it was the best anyone could want. And, if you don't feel it this way, you should make the necessary efforts to appreciate yourself more. Personal confidence and social magnetism depend on how exciting and fun our lifestyle can seem, but also how we see ourselves.

However, we don't need to lie or exaggerate the details, as it could make us look the opposite of what we want and others would feel uncomfortable in our presence. The difficulty in having proper conversations creates anxiety, so it's only natural that people may avoid those that make them feel bored and confused, even if they're just shy.

Everyone is important and we should see ourselves in such way, so knowing that we're not less important than an actor or a musician helps in understanding it. This level is reached when learning to create value for our existence. It starts with questions such as, what do you love to do? Or, what makes you happy?

The answer isn't as important as how you feel about what you do, because this is who you are. If you have a silly or boring hobby of collecting coins or playing chess but you love it, make it look like it's something great! Don't feel inferior if others don't see it in the same way! And, know that the most popular guy I ever met in my life, had more sex than anyone else in his city, but also a huge collection of different perfumes that would be the envy of every woman and the laugh of every man. Nevertheless, he never allowed himself to be mocked, and instead always answered: "Yeah, I like to smell nice, and you? What perfume do you use? Do you like to smell like roses or you just trust in your own natural horse perfume?". And, this attitude is what would make anyone rethink about the value of their lifestyle and choices.

One part of a conversation consists in showing your value through the things you love and another in making others realize that they should be able to see it. Here's an example:

Her: What do you do?

Him: I teach martial arts.

Her: So, you're a very aggressive person.

Him: I don't see myself in such way, because for me martial arts are a way to find myself and express. In fact, it can be seen as a dance as well.

Her: A dance?

Him: Yes, the movements can be so well-coordinated and elegant that you look like you're dancing tango with knifes.

Her: Really?

Him: Yes.

Her: You must show me that one day!

Another example:

Her: What do you do?

Him: I'm a Mathematics Teacher.

Her: Seems boring.

Him: If you look only at the numbers it's boring, but if you realize it can help you make money in casinos by using the rule of probabilities it's fun. In fact, I have applied it with friends to win games and I won money with it. Feels better than being James Bond.

Her: Really?

Him: Yes, but there's more. You can use mathematics to analyze tendencies in society and check the way people think to understand them better. Psychology and Sociology uses it a lot and I can use their studies to help friends. Some of these theories allowed me to help several friends, but also to have a better sex life.

Her: Better sex life?

Him: Yes, because by knowing what the tendency in society is, I can predict what attracts people.

Her: Does it work?

Him: Well, maybe you're the exception to the rule as I've been having quite a lot of success.

Her: Really?

Him: The amount of numbers in my mobile speaks for itself.

Her: Show me!

Him: I only show private things to people that sleep with me, and you haven't yet.

Her: It's fine! I don't care!

His: Yes, you do!

Her: (smile)

One more example:

Her: What do you do?

Him: I'm a University Lecturer.

Her: So you have a low salary and a boring job.

Him: Yes, but also 200 horny teenagers eager for sex with me.

Her: (smile). Do you have sex with your students?

Him: That's a secret.

Her: Tell me!

Him: Guess!

Her: I guess you do. Do you?

Him: Why do you want to know such things? Are you jealous?

Her: (laughs).

Another situation:

Her: What's your job?

Him: I can't tell you. All I can say is that I found something very interesting a few days ago. Do you know how the porn industry works? They require a man to shoot many scenes the whole day, but the size of their penis and their body shape don't really matter. Only how much sex they can handle.

Her: Are you a porn star?

Him: I don't usually talk about my past.

Her: I'm sure you are (smile). Tell me!

Him: I don't want to talk about it (change subject).

These principles also apply to women. Here's an example:

Him: What do you do?

Her: I work in a trading company that does business with lots of countries.

Him: What's your job there?

Her: I have several tasks, even though I work with the computer and mostly handling papers. But I enjoy the responsibility of having so much money that I must handle well. Plus, my Boss is a great person and I enjoy the conversations I have with him and my colleagues. It's a quite pleasant and fun environment.

Him: So, are you a very responsible person?

Her: Of course I am, if I feel respected, of course.

Him: And if people disrespect you?

Her: They lose someone with value to the company.

Him: And if it's a friend, do you do the same?

Her: Of course. Why? Do you want to lose me? I can just go away now if you want!

Him: Of course not. Please stay here!

Being truthful and honest when talking to others, is very important when building attraction, because it helps you feel more relaxed and others can sense it, becoming more relaxed near you as well. But, these skills must be developed with time, by talking to different individuals, as the more you do it, the easier it becomes.

People are attracted to your feelings and not your lifestyle, so they'll want to be with you to share emotions and not your perspective of work or daily hobbies. Everyone wishes a fun and loving person, committed, energetic, sexy and motivated, and, these attributes can be related to a job, but also to sex and relationships.

Communication

"All the great lovers are articulate and verbal seduction is the surest road to actual seduction" (Marva Mannes).

There are two key-points to create value when talking to another person:

* The way you talk about yourself;

* The importance you give to the other person.

One of the most interesting things about communication is that people treasure more the ones giving them value. Most are desperately in the need of someone to give them appreciation, provide attention, listen and, essentially, validate them as human beings.

When you help another person creating her value, you also increase your own value, and compliments are the best validations.

Searching for common interests doesn't require sharing the same activities, but finding interest in the life or activities of the other. And, it can be as simple as a person knowing how to play chess and you wanting to learn it.

It's not difficult to find topics that help in developing interaction. In a very basic level, you can start with movies and TV series, and proceed from this to other issues that these movies may talk about. But, control the conversation towards the direction of positive emotions, as most people tend to be negative about themselves and life.

The other side of the conversation consists in giving importance to yourself as well, by showing what you know and what you can do, as much as possible and in a simple, subtle and discreet way.

Even though the other person may feel you're exhibiting yourself, there's nothing wrong with this. When someone feels uncomfortable about what you say regarding yourself, it means that he or she is feeling inferior to you, which is related to insecurity. Therefore, you must try to keep the conversation under an ideal balance.

Remember that your tone of voice and body posture also communicates, and you must be aware of this when talking to someone.

* Don't show aggressive or closed attitudes, such as moving very fast or crossing your arms;

* Don't talk loudly and don't try to control the conversation;

* Use a moderate tone of voice and an open attitude;

* Be pleasant, relaxed and smile;

* Don't be afraid to change your body posture and move your hands;

Touching the other person helps in creating intimacy during conversation, but should be done in a proper moment. A touch may have different meanings and can be applied naturally, such as when with friends, but never touch a person you want to have a relationship with in a strong or passive way. Do it as if your gesture didn't intend anything that the other person wouldn't allow!

* You can touch slowly to stop the speech;

* You can touch to make him or her pay attention to you;

* You can touch in a friendly way if you disagree with something.

The first time you touch, should be with the point of your fingers or finger, and only if, after that, you can proceed to touch for a longer period of time.

The right timing to do this, depends merely in how the interaction proceeds. And, if you're good at it, you can move so fast that, from a touch, you go to grabbing the hand or arm, hugging, kissing and having sex, in less than one hour.

The basic point in this subject is that the conversation mustn't be applied out of control or for manipulation purposes. It should follow positive emotions, common value and proceed to other forms of expression.

Mirroring the other person's moves can determine the level of interest such person has on us, but it's nothing to compare to a giver-receiver flow without breaks, in which the other doesn't refuse your touch and neither do you, resulting in more intimate moments that end in a quick and stable relationship.

Naturally, we cannot expect everyone to accept us, so even though these rules apply internationally, either you're with Europeans, Chinese, South Americans, or anyone else from any region in the world, don't expect to succeed all the time.

Never waste energy with someone that doesn't appreciate you, but always open space for new individuals to enter your life! Invest your emotions, learn, but always be positive towards yourself and others! And, if your value isn't seen, learn the lesson, heal your hounds and move on!

Our world is big enough to be explored in several lifetimes and the future is made of random opportunities, most of them that we wouldn't ever expect, predict or get without taking risks.

Alpha Male

"His eyes made love to me all evening" (Marguerite Gautier).

If you want to attract the opposite sex, you must appear as opposite as possible to it.

Just like a common man doesn't appreciate a woman with masculine traits, women usually don't appreciate men having feminine gestures. The concepts of bad boy, cool guy or alpha male, came from this ideal. And, if thinking carefully about these believes, we can reach some deeper conclusions that transcend social paradigms, such as that a man...

* Isn't afraid to suffer;

* Takes action;

* It's a leader;

* Takes care of his woman;

* Cares for his family well-being;

* Protects others;

* Puts his emotions in second place in life.

These ideals are very ancient, and can be rethought in a modern approach. We can say that they shouldn't apply anymore, as men don't hunt buffalo's and don't need to go to war. But, we can also talk about equal rights leveling women and men with balance.

The fact is that everyone acts according to their own believe system, which tends to be interrelated to their basic instincts. Therefore, apart from our conscious ideas related to a modern society, we'll always react towards instincts. We're talking about millions of years following principles that only recently have been changing. Before, this was the reality for men:

* Isn't afraid to suffer: Means he will go to war and fight for his territory or die trying;

* Takes action: As he's a leader, he can't wait. He's the active part in everything related to his group;

* Is a leader: Takes decisions all the time and about everything;

* Takes care of his woman and rest of the family: The family depends on him, so he's always working to care about his group;

* Protects: By being the strongest in his group, he protects his family against other humans or animals;

* Puts his emotions in second place in life: He feels, but doesn't react according to his feelings because this may affect his decisions. He thinks about the survival of the group first, so attacks when in fear if the group needs protection and doesn't attack if this may mean that he'll be killed, allowing the group to die without his protection. So, his actions are based on the survival of his tribe and not his own.

And, this is the logic that applies nowadays:

* Is not afraid to suffer: Means that although there's no war going on, a woman will create it, to see if her man can handle it or cry for her approval;

* Takes action: Means that in a situation of mutual attraction, it's less likely that she tries to kiss him, but instead seduce in order for the man to be the first kissing. The attitude of a woman is indirect and based on waiting for the man to take actions and, if he doesn't, she loses interest;

* Is a leader: Means that a woman will expect her man to take decisions all the time. The less he does it, the more she loses interest. She'll not say what she wants, even if knowing it, but wait for a man to take the leading role;

* Takes care of his woman and rest of the family: It means he'll be the one calling her and showing interest on her. He should be the one inviting her out, taking her to restaurants and choosing mutual activities; A woman may do it as well, but she'll usually expect for a man to do it first;

* Protects: It means that a woman must feel safe with a man, to talk about her life problems and run to him when needing help, but also that he'll never abandon her. Therefore, she may test him by abandoning him first, just to check if he stays in the same place or leaves her;

* Puts his emotions in second place in life: She will create fights to see if he reacts to the aggression or stays neutral and strong as a rock.

These examples represent non-intentional tests, as a woman isn't aware of why she feels the impulse to behave in such ways. But, her emotions towards men are related to their reaction.

Delusions

Women usually like what's known as the bad boy type or the cool man. The bad boy is the one that isn't afraid of pain or danger and will see his woman as just one more among his friends. So, he's not afraid to lose her and doesn't react to her emotions. He does what believes to serve his interest best.

The problem with such personality is that it's very attractive in a first level, as he approaches without fear of rejection and will tell a woman what to do without taking into consideration her feelings, but once the relationship starts, she needs a kind of protection that won't be seen in this man. So, bad boys may have an easy sex life, but aren't lucky in keeping relationships.

A cool guy is similar to the bad boy, as he wears does what he wants, without caring about what others think of him. He's also the guy that can keep his mouth shut for hours, even if it makes others uncomfortable, because, again, he doesn't need social approval.

This personality could be associated with leadership, but a woman soon realizes that this type tends to be disrespectful and not protective. So, in a sense, he's not luckier than a bad boy.

The Alpha male is the one that has it all, but then we come to another point of analysis and that's related to how relationships are handled. As an example, when several men are gathered, women will choose, not exactly the most good-looking or strong, but the most Alpha, and that's the one making decisions, controlling the conversation and leading emotions.

A man can fight for leadership and do stupid things, like many usually do, but, in doing, they lose the confidence women chase. So, the best strategy consists in avoiding situations in which he can't look like the leader.

In a group, leaders are men that walk, look and dress with confidence, the ones that others look at, both men and women. It's relatively easy to identify them by seeing how a group of people behaves in the beginning.

However, the most interesting thing to notice is that, the more instinctive, sexual and feminine a woman is, the more she'll expect a man to be very primitive. And, that's why it's so common to see beautiful and delicate women with ugly and creepy men. But, we may also say that the most horny, depressed, lonely, aggressive women look for the most Alpha Males. As these women are more connected to their unconscious instincts, their inner feelings and needs, they're more far from making reasonable judgments about men. Intelligence and looks aren't properly taken into consideration when making decisions.

Alpha Female

"Man proposes; woman forecloses" (Minna Antrim).

Let's think about the ideal women of the past:

* She'll stay home cleaning and taking care of the house;

* She'll prepare food and cook for the family;

* She'll be passive and won't give any instructions;

* She obeys and follows what a man says;

* She'll be her man's pride, therefore looking beautiful in front of other people.

Following these ancient principles, a man will expect a woman to...

* Stay home cleaning and taking care of the house: Means that she'll not go out with other men and she'll not flirt around but look very exclusive. In other words, it's more attractive to a man, first the woman that is alone and second the woman that is with female friends, but unattractive the woman surrounded by men. In fact, he'll probably stereotype this last case as just some kind of whore without potential to be wife.

* She'll prepare food and cook for the family: It means that a man will expect her to know what he likes and thinks. A woman that shows knowledge about a man, appears more attractive to him. And, that's why men usually fall in love for women with bitchy and manipulative attitude, as they give the idea they can control a relationship regarding common needs, while pleasing their man.

* She'll be passive and not give any instructions: Means that men are more attracted to women that do what they want and allow them to take decisions;

* She'll be her man's pride, therefore looking beautiful in front of other people: The best-looking woman is the pride that any man wants, but looking pretty isn't enough. He wants also a woman that knows how to behave and talk in front of other people, a woman that won't embarrass him in public;

A man won't feel attracted for more than casual sex, with a woman that presents a large cleavage and wears short mini-skirt while having nothing more to offer. In the other hand, he may feel very attracted to the kind of woman that everyone appreciates, someone that everyone runs for to get advices, even if she's not very good-looking.

If we take the example of a club or bar, we may see that the ones to be more approached by men are not necessarily the prettiest, but those that follow this tendency.

* The lonely woman at the counter;

* The woman talking to other women;

* The woman that is more delicate and careful with her behavior;

* The woman that looks friendlier and smiles often;

* The woman that wears very feminine clothing;

* The woman with more sensuality.

In fact, beautiful women tend to smile less in public places, because they know that a simple smile can attract a lot of men and the opposite can filter them. But, as she knows that she has plenty of choices, she's also raising the probability of meeting more Alpha Males, as she also knows that only the most brave and Alpha type will approach her without fear of rejection.

Approaching

"Seduce me, write letters to me, and poems, I love poems. Ravish me with your words! Seduce me!" (Anne Boleyn).

Don't expect everyone to like you and don't try yourself with anyone randomly. One of the smartest moves you can make when in a bar, club, meeting, or any other situation where you can meet someone you like, consists in noticing the signs of someone that can be interested in you.

You can meet people anywhere, from a bus stop to a library, supermarket or concert, but you must provide them excuses to meet you as well. So, it doesn't really matter who approaches, although women tend to expect it more than men, but if there's common attraction or not.

The first interaction is always eye contact, and if a woman looks to a man, the sign of interest is given, even though they often don't know it, including when she looks twice or more.

The second level of interaction consists in positioning yourself strategically in the situation. If we're talking about a supermarket, it means that a woman will pretend to be confused about what to buy to see if the man near her approaches with something to say.

Surely, these situations have a specific timing, so the approach should be immediate and natural. There aren't any specific phrases required. If the other person is interested in us, any reasonable approach is acceptable, and it can start with something as simple as saying "hello".

The conversation should be casual, without direct interests, while allowing further development. For example:

Her: Hi!

Him: Hi!

Her: I've never seen you shopping her before. Do you need any help?

Him: I can't find the toothpaste section. Can you help me?

Her: Sure! Come with me!

The guy may not care about the tooth paste. If he likes this woman, he'll say anything to keep her around.

Here's the example of a club:

Him: Hi!

Her: Hi!

Him: You look very nice with that dress!

Her: Thanks!

As it's very difficult to talk inside a Club, you must see this simple reaction as a positive reply. So, the rest is basically about body communication and it consists in coming closer and dancing like you're his or her best friend. Then you may say other simple things to keep this interaction, but, eventually, you must pull him or her out of that noise, to talk more and develop some intimacy.

It's also important to say that there are many ways to say hello. A smile, moving the head up, or down, as a compliment, or waving the hand, are some of them. Surely, it's also possible to use a direct approach, but everything depends on the situation. In a coffee shop, we may ask to sit in the table of the other person, for example. Any conversation that follows this approach can be acceptable if kept simple and casual. Here's an example:

Her: Hi! Do you mind if I sit here?

Him: No! Please do!

Her: I couldn't help noticing how insightful you were and I was curious about your job. What do you do?

Other signs can be taken into account if we don't feel comfortable enough. Nonetheless, we must remember that everything has timing and, the more we wait, the more we look vulnerable, weak and less valuable. We can look at the body of the other person and analyze how that person moves. It will obviously depend on the context, but most behaviors are quite similar in any situation. Common body postures of openness are:

* Straight posture;

* Looking around randomly as if waiting for something to happen;

* Slow body movements not to scare the person that is observing;

* Subtle seductive moves to increase value and attraction.

The seductive behavior may vary if we're talking about men or women. And, for women it's the following:

* Touching the hair with the point of her fingers or curling the hair around them;

* Having the legs crossed with the inner part in the direction of a man;

* Slow and subtle but abnormal moves of her hips;

* Putting the fingers or any other object in the mouth;

* Touching her blouse or cleavage to make her breast more noticeable;

* Waving a leg in a continuous, persistent and anxious movement;

* Taking part of her shoe off.

For a man, it's usually this:

* Readjusting his posture and making himself look straight;

* Moving a hand to his face to show confidence;

* Hiding the mouth with the hand;

* Touching his neck;

* Biting his lip;

* Scratching his arm or fingers.

Most people worry about getting emails and phone numbers but this is the last thing you want to think about. The most important thought you should have is about maintaining the interaction fulfilling, and not only to show yourself, but mostly to analyze if the other person is suitable for you.

Never approach like you want something! Do exactly the opposite! Approach like you're surprised by the existence of the other but you don't really need nothing from her/him! In the end of the conversation, you may decide to ask for the number or not. And, don't think that you lose anything in not having the number, because you don't! Each encounter represents a new learning experience and it counts in your inner development when learning how to behave with the opposite sex.

Act according to how the conversation emerges. Most of the times, if it goes well, the moment to ask for a contact will occur naturally. Here's an example:

Her: Do you come here often?

Him: Usually, yes.

Her: So, if I need your help with a questionnaire I'm applying for my job, can you help me?

Him: Questionnaire? About what?

Her: About what you've just told me moments ago.

Him: Ok! no problem.

Her: So, can I contact you for us to meet?

Him: Sure! Here's my number!

It doesn't really matter which questionnaire it is or the subject. I've seen several women successfully applying this technique on men. If the person gives you a chance, man or woman, the topic isn't important, because he/she may realize it's all a game, but as he/she is into you, will still play it.

Opportunities

"I suppose that romantic love was invented as a brilliant means of seduction" (Sigmund Freud).

The best places to meet people and interact with them are groups, because inside a group everyone feels comfortable and without pressure, which makes it all much easier. But there are different kinds of groups:

* Groups of friends;

* Groups of strangers;

* Our group.

The group of friends is related to events where we know most individuals present. It's a gathering of our friends and, therefore, a much more comfortable context. Some examples are private parties, weddings, birthday parties, etc.

The group of strangers is about those in which people are gathered, not because of common friends, but common interests. Some examples are the religious groups, seminars and conferences, activity groups and sport meetings.

In fact, there are many women that aren't inside religion to pray but to play angel while finding a man they can be a demon with.

Finally, we have our own group, which gets together when we create an event and our friends bring their friends, or an event that allows us to bring new people into the group that nobody else knows.

We don't need to focus in merely one group as it's possible to change to the context that applies. As an example, from a group of strangers, it's possible to create a group of friends, and from this group, build our own group based in personal interests, and these members are the people we invite.

We can also create a group of friends out of nothing, and it's as simple as founding a club of card games, chess or outdoor activities.

Nobody goes for games anyway, but to meet other people and make new friends.

Thanks to internet and taking into account the number of people that uses it it's very easy to create a group with common interests. However, it's important to mention that, if we want to increase the probability of finding a soul-mate. or even just a sex partner, we must increase the number of individuals in our personal social circle. And, this means that the more persons we know, the higher the probability of something like this to occur.

The best way to do it consists in following our personal interests, as by finding people with the same interests as ours it's easier to communicate naturally.

We can always be extreme and just go directly to the point, like doing a Yoga class if you're a man or entering a Kickboxing team if you're a woman. But, prolonging ourselves in doing things we don't like lowers our self-esteem and confidence, which will eventually reflect lower value towards others. So, for these situations I suggest only one or two classes. And, if the person you want is there, be quick and direct in approaching. It's either you two start meeting outside those classes or you quit, or both.

Failures

"It's your work in life that is the ultimate seduction" (Pablo Picasso).

We live in a big world full of never-ending opportunities, so we should see our failures as opportunities to learn and not as an evaluation to our personality.

Due to the fact that we live in a society where everything is an exam and the evaluation we receive, either at school or in a job interview, can determine our future, we tend to develop the idea that failing represents the end of opportunities. But, it's not true, especially regarding relationships and socializing.

If we see meeting others as a chance to learn more about ourselves and what we really want, we never lose anything in the process. It's a path of learning, development and self-empowerment.

Each time you meet someone, you'll notice where you should develop yourself more, but also what you don't want in a partner. And, after this experience, you are clearer about what you want and can find it more easily.

At the same time, it's also very important that you are able to say no, as you'll find many individuals that aren't compatible with you. Don't chase them either you're a man or a woman! Be clear about what you want and don't want in thought and actions! Each second you spend with those that don't deserve it, it's a second you waste to meet someone more worthy, and the more energy you waste with people that aren't good for you, the more time you waste in finding the right person. Somehow, we could say that you decrease the probability of finding the right person by increasing the time spent with someone unworthy.

The fear of being alone is normal and many people can't handle loneliness, but if you want guests in your life, you must clean and empty it first. Allow yourself to be alone and move on, especially if you're attaching yourself to a self-destructive relationship! It doesn't really matter how many years a relationship has or how strong our feelings for the other person may be, if the outcome keeps being negative. A bad life isn't worth living, and we all die alone.

Rules of the game

"The resistance of a woman to a man's advance is not always a sign of virtue. Sometimes is just a sign of experience" (Ninon de Lenclos).

One of the main rules when playing the game of seduction is to never be in disadvantage. But, one of the most important things usually forgotten is that we shouldn't try to gain advantage either. And, that's why it's called a game, not a competition. As an example, if you call more times than you're called back, never give the impression you like that person. The key idea is that you shouldn't need others, but make them need you. So, always pass the understanding that the other person is joining you in something you're doing and his or her presence isn't a must. This gives the idea that you're an independent person, which is very attractive. Here's the difference.

One thing is to say:

"Do you want to go out with me to the swimming pool?"

Another thing is saying:

"I'm going to the swimming pool. Do you want to join me?"

But, it's even better to say:

"I'm going out with some friends to the swimming pool. Give me a call if you want to join us!"

This is the impression these messages have on others:

* In the first message, you're in disadvantage, as it makes you look like you need the other person in order to have fun in life and, in doing so, you also appear to be a boring person, emotionally dependent;

* In the second message, you put the situation in equal terms, as you show that you don't need others to enjoy life;

* But, in the third situation, you're clearly being superior, while not making the other feel inferior.

The third message gives the impression that you're valuable, because you have friends to hangout, and also that you may find among those friends someone that wants you as a life partner. So, you pass to the other person the idea that you have value, you're rare and also that time is limited for him/her to catch you.

Naturally, the other can still refuse to spend time with you, but such decision won't make either feel inferior. However, the anxiety of losing someone may rise when we're rejected, and so will the unconscious need to chase, which reinforces the magnetism of attraction between both.

The second part of this game consists in giving the idea that there's a competition going on, and, if she's a woman, she won't be the only one trying to get you. The other person will test this several times to make sure it's true, especially if you're not that attractive to her, but you must never drop the game. Because, at a certain point, she'll wonder what people are seeing that she can't, and in this quest she will try to see something new.

The more new things are seen, proving your attractiveness, the more reasons will exist to have you. And, that's how people get trapped in their own game of finding the truth.

In order to do this well, never reveal either truths or lies, but allow the other to play according to his or her will. This adventure will increase anxiety and the need to possess, which leads to sexual feelings. Here are a few strategies that help creating a better scenario:

* Make sure that your friends, especially the ones of the opposite sex, call you while you're with him/her;

* When someone calls you, don't be afraid to interrupt the conversation and talk for a long time with that person, but make sure you have fun with the talk, so that the other in front of you feels pressure with the thought of losing you;

* Dress well, so that people from the opposite sex may look at you while you're with your partner, in order for him/her to realize how valuable you are;

* Leave random pictures of friends of the opposite sex on your computer, especially if you're a man, because women are very curious, and for sure she'll check your computer. If she sees other women, mainly pretty women, she will see how lucky she is in having you, as she may lose you if she doesn't try hard. Again, this raises the anxiety and the effort in keeping a person.

You'll know that it's true, when after taking a shower and leaving your computer on, you come back to the room and she's all head over heels about you. But, it's also very important that you're able to be patient. So, don't be afraid to wait and learn how to wait.

Part of the anxiety created between two people during this game is about, not only the interaction itself, but also the lack of interaction. You may think that during these empty periods you may in fact lose a partner, and you can, but that's why it's a game, as it couldn't be if only one was playing.

The reason why most people don't know how to play the game of seduction is because they believe that losing means chasing the other person instead of the opposite. But, that's not true. You only lose when the game is over, as you can't play it alone.

Intimacy

"Subtle his needs must be, who could seduce Angels" John Milton

If a friendship is going in the right direction and things are quite at ease between both, it's time to move to another level.

We can't expect stability in the dynamic between two persons. It won't last, especially if both are looking for that special someone. There will be a constant attempt to create opportunities to meet more people. And, this happens more if there's a sense of wasting time with someone that seems to want nothing more than a friendship.

There's no such thing as the right time to create intimacy. It can be during the first night out, the second, or after two months of friendship. Nevertheless, it should happen soon, to allow a deeper connection, even if it doesn't become immediately stable after this.

The way to do it well consists in bringing the other to your personal environment, the same places that this person would share with you if both had a relationship.

The process of creating intimacy consists, basically, in eliminating the barriers between two individuals, both mental and physical, so that when the real relationship begins it's not only easier but also natural. When easy and natural, will be seen by both as just something that should happen and not that could happen. And, that's the main difference, as by creating intimacy you lead the other into thinking the opposite of what he or she thinks. It's the difference between thinking "Maybe we could be in a relationship" and "Why are we not in a relationship already?".

It's this feeling of being wrong, which nobody wants, that makes the other want the relationship, because he/she wants to be right.

Nobody likes to feel uncomfortable when friends ask why we spend so much time with a certain person, and the answer is "we're just friends". But, also nobody wants to feel rejected by spending time with someone in a relationship that doesn't truly exist. The pressure that intimacy brings, forces people to wish the relationship.

As mentioned earlier, intimacy consists in sharing life as a couple in a relationship, namely, by having lunch and dinner together, and having common routines.

As movies promote it too much, sometimes it brings more pressure than it should. Therefore, subtle ways that aren't clear for the mind, but only to the heart are more suitable. They include the following:

* Inviting for drinks and snacks at your place;

* Spending time talking with that individual in your apartment, instead of coffee shops, especially at night;

* Sharing activities together, such as cooking or traveling.

To resume, it consists in putting the activities ahead of the relationship, so that they become so much part of your time spent together that you don't see each differently. And, this strategy is so effective that it works immediately most of the times. It will depend merely on the personality of the one invited.

If we invite a person to drink tea at our house at eleven at night, it can start there. The same applies with cooking or traveling together. The feeling of being inside a relationship is so strong that the other will feel like an idiot in refusing a kiss, a tender intimate touch or even sex. He/she may delay it, but not likely refuse it.

It doesn't matter if it's a man or a woman, as it will apply to both.

But, intimacy isn't just about activities. It's related also to the way you dress. It's not true that hiding things creates attraction. It may create some anxiety, but if you want the other to feel already inside a relationship that should start anytime soon, you must behave like so. If you're a woman, it means showing intimate parts of your body in a discrete way, such as legs and breast. You may do it only at home, so that the other feels that you're only open to him. And, you may, for example, say to him: "I hope you don't mind that I wear this blouse, but when at home I like to feel comfortable. If you don't feel comfortable I can change". This applies to anything you wear, including a robe.

Another option consists in using your imagination, such as drooping a cold coffee on you, pretending it was an accident, and then take your shirt off like it's normal. "Damn, I just destroyed my blouse!", you may say.

While you take it off without looking at him, say something like: "I will just change it in a minute and come right back!". Meanwhile, you can take the blouse while getting up to your room, allowing him to see your bra.

A man could do the same: "Wow! I just destroyed my favorite trousers with coffee!". He can start taking his trousers off, and then stop, look at the woman, and say: "Oh, sorry! I forgot! Give me a minute and I'll be right back".

These situations create plenty of sexual tension and may lead to sex.

At a certain point, the other person will start feeling that leaving your place is just nonsense. After all, with so much intimacy between both, leaving it seems like something abnormal to do. And, in this way, you're making the staying look normal.

What was mentioned before can also be used with objects:

* "I would like to know your opinion about this. Can you come to my room? I just bought a pillow and new sheets but I don't know if they're good. Do you like?";

* "I'm thinking about changing something in this living-room but I'm not sure about the best way to decorate it. What do you think?".

In both situations, you're allowing the person to interfere in very particular parts of your life, which usually only couples do together, like changing the appearance of the apartment. And, the same happens if you go with her/him to buy things together for your house.

Sexual tension

"Most virtue is a demand for greater seduction" (Natalie Clifford Barney).

Seduction depends on a proper use of intimacy and sexual tension. Here are some examples:

* Share some beers in your house to relax both of you;

* Sit closer together when talking and touch him/her often;

* Watch a movie together.

Skip as much steps as possible before sex.

Here are some examples:

* "Do you want to watch a movie? Can it be in my room, because the TV there is bigger and the bed is much more comfortable than the couch.";

* "I feel very tired. Do you mind if I lay down in my bed while we talk? You can sit next to me or sit in the bed if you want";

* "I have new cool music that I have just heard and I would like to show you, but the computer is in my room. Can we move there?"

In this last situation you must put the computer next to the bed, so that the person sits on it while listening to the music.

The same can be done with other examples, like pictures and stuff sent by email.

Here are some:

* "My back is hurting me. I think I need a massage. Do you know any place? I shouldn't spend so much money now. Maybe you can give me a small massage for free. Can you, please?";

* "Sometimes girls behave weirdly. Yesterday I had a girl coming to me and I thought she was going to kiss me because she touched me like this and then came closer to me, like this";

* "How do guys approach you? Do they talk very close to your mouth like this, to try kissing you?";

* "I heard something funny on television yesterday. They said some people can feel their magnetism according to the distance and that's what pulls sexual attraction. Like if I come closer to a person, just like this, and I touch her arms in this way, the other will feel pressure to kiss. Do you feel it?"

If she/he says "no", you can continue: "But I do!"

Hugging is also a very important way to get closer and increase sexual tension, as it represents an interaction of two bodies just like in sex.

* "I can see you're not well. Give me a hug!"

* "You're so nice. Thanks! Give me a hug!"

Many other things can be done. Unfortunately, most people don't like to share their knowledge and experience about this. They're somehow afraid of losing opportunities to have sex if they share it. So, you'll have to learn it on your own. See each failure as a new opportunity to learn and keep thinking about new strategies as you experience them.

The ones just mentioned are the most commonly used, easiest to apply and with best results.

Rules of sex

"You have to penetrate a woman's defenses. Getting into her head is a prerequisite to getting into her body" (Bob Guccione).

Sex is like a dance and if you're not a good dancer don't worry. Just remember that the same principles apply:

* Synchronization;

* Timing;

* Feelings;

* Rhythm;

* Expression.

If you can enjoy music, you can enjoy sex, as both are about feelings with rhythm, and that's the reason why people enjoy more and relax easily when doing it with music.

Also, we can see, and many do see, how someone behaves in bed by the way they dance, which could lead us to assume much about the difference between most of the South Americans and Asians. Sexy, sensual and very expressive dancers are usually the best for sex and that's why both genders are attracted to good dancers.

Regarding the principles previously mentioned, synchronization means following the moves of your partner and behaving according to them. Each kiss, touch and reaction of yours creates feedback in your partner. Therefore, enjoy giving pleasure while paying attention to the one received!

Timing is about the right moment for each thing to happen. There are moments for slow and fast moves, for soft and hard attitudes, for more romantic approaches or primitive actions, for kissing or grabbing, etc. Learn about your partner's reaction to pleasure him/her in each move you do, and explore them all without fears, but be slow to start new things and quick to change them, according to what's perceived.

Feel when you give and give when you feel! Don't be afraid to show that you're having pleasure, because, in doing so, your partner feels also more pleasure, and this applies even more if we're talking about oral sex.

At the same time, search for the most erogenous and enjoying body parts of your partner, where he/she likes you to touch the most. Each person can be different in this field. So, do everything with rhythm, while feeling the energy flowing around both of you.

Music can help a lot, as both will have sex according to the sounds of it.

Regarding the best choice in music for sex, I suggest slow rhythms with sounds that help synchronize, like drums or bells. New Age style of music, chill-out and Arab music can be good choices.

Don't focus in sex as a path to penetration and don't think about penetration itself! Take your time and enjoy everything! Orgasm is the end and the beginning of sex. It should last as much as possible and it starts with pleasure.

See sex as an art and express yourself as an artist! Express your feelings and desires and don't be afraid to try new things, even in the first time you have sex with a specific person. Taking your partner to a table or a window, for example, can be seen as something daring as well as exciting. And, the same applies to changing the speed in which you both have sex, which can be stimulating.

Much more examples could be given but, in essence, it's all about self-expression. That's the essence of lasting longer with the highest amount of satisfaction.

Rules of love

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment,..." (Leo Buscaglia).

A big part of a relationship consists in allowing the other to know you, but it's more important to find a common thinking pattern, than subjects or activities. In other words, you don't really need to be, act or do something, according to what the person is, acts or does. You should be yourself and see if who you are can match the other!

* Find what you like in him/her and talk about it;

* See what she/he likes in you and talk about it;

* Let the other be part of your world by sharing your emotions, worries, interests, curiosities and, basically, your reality;

* Let him/her feel part of you, more than with you;

* At the same time, you should focus in bringing him/her joy and letting him/her bring you joy as well, with compliments and mutual help;

* Say "thank you!", every time the other appreciates something in you and try to appreciate and compliment things that you really like in the other person as well;

* If you find the opportunity to help him/her, do it, either with advices or actions! Help is a strong link between people. When you help someone, that person becomes thankful and appreciated to you. It's also a form of creating emotional debt, so the ones you help are less likely to refuse intimacy with you if they like you;

* Be honest when helping others, otherwise what you're doing isn't creating a relationship naturally, but manipulating the other person's feelings;

* Find what that person needs that you can give, and when giving, do it with an open heart, without expecting anything in return, so that you also don't feel hurt if in the near future nothing happens between both. Help, can go from giving advices, sharing thoughts, to borrowing a movie;

* Learn as well to relax and be yourself, because if you're not honest the other won't feel comfortable near you, as he/she can sense it;

* Be a valuable part of the relationship since the very beginning with respect, understanding and help. The more the other feels respected, understood and helped, the more he/she will enjoy spending time together, and more easily develop feelings of love towards you.

These principles are so effective that they'll work in situations where someone is still in love for another person or in the middle of a divorce. The feelings we have for another won't interfere in the development of feelings for a new one.

Remember that, without the fear of losing someone, you always win, because seduction and relationships are part of a game and, most of the times, unless it ends in marriage, we may say we have lost this game. Anyway, most people believe marriage means winning this game, but half of them end in divorce, and, the ones that don't, are usually unsatisfying. So, we may as well say that most people lose the game. When the game is lost, not only one loses it, but both.

The game is won when the relationship is going towards an uplifting happiness, and this is a win-win situation.

Love has no losers; only winners! If you're hurt, love again! Never stop love from flowing in your heart!

You can love all your life or you can suffer for as much as you want. Both situations are indeed a life's choice, but you only lose love if you want, as the feeling isn't inside one relationship or person, but in the world, and you can have as much as you want, if you know how to open yourself to find it and receive it.

If a relationship doesn't work

"Pursuit and seduction are the essence of sexuality. It's part of the sizzle" (Camille Paglia).

Don't be afraid of relationships that may fail, because life doesn't end with a relationship and you can always love again, seduce again, and find someone better. But, in order for this to happen, you must allow the unpredictable to happen, such as finding the one you want when you least expect.

As you focus your mind on this and learn to relax about your ideal relationship, always put yourself in first place, by doing what you love in life, so that you never suffer and get hurt.

One of the reasons why people suffer when breaking up, is because they invest all their time and feelings into it. If you learn to put all your feelings in what you love, and not only a relationship, it's easier to move on with your life after a breakup, independently of how meaningful the other person was in your life.

It's normal to keep having feelings for that person, but the main point is that you can let her/him go and open space for someone else to arrive.

Don't waste thoughts and energy with people that aren't for you but open your heart and mind, so that your dreams can come true! The thoughts in which you put your personal energy increase the possibility of the reality you see to happen. If you focus in lost relationships, that's what you'll have - a never ending cycle of frustration. But, if you focus in finding someone deserving, you'll get it more easily.

Take fast decisions during relationships to demand respect from others, not to lose time in your life and always allow what's negative to stay behind you! Close the doors of your life to negative people and never look back!

Where your energy is, there will be your future, so be positive!

If a relationship works

"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind" (William James).

If your relationship works, assume the commitment and drop your game.

The game of seduction can be very positive before a relationship starts but destructive afterward.

There are different dynamics happening before and after starting a relationship and you must be aware of this if you want to make it work. Seduction is just one part of the whole game, and it's the most basic one. You can seduce many people, but what you really want in the end is to be happy with one of them.

In order to have this happiness and stability in your life, create routines with your partner! Routines and habits are what strengthens a relationship and makes it last, but be aware of not allowing your relationship to face boredom.

Always try to share joy with your partner and help him or her finding it! Help also your partner in providing you with happiness, by describing your needs.

In growing together within this happiness and accomplishment, both will become more mature and love will last without hounds, to flourish into something much greater - spiritual development, life-sharing, a mature emotional exchange, as well as mutual support.

Knowing what you want

"We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts" (Buddha).

You'll never be happy unless you know what you want. Be clear about it! Write in a paper all the characteristics you're looking for in a partner, both physical and psychological, but also what you need from him or her!

Then, focus in dreaming about your ideal partner and that ideal relationship every day, before going to sleep and when waking up!

As you develop your heart in the direction of your dreams, you'll make better choices in life, and find the one you want sooner than you expect. But don't force destiny, as you can meet the one you want when you least expect it!

Also, never give up searching that one person and have faith in life, but above all, in yourself. Believe that you deserve the best and can have it!

If you can dream about someone, you can find it, so trust destiny!

The more your heart focuses in what you want, instead of what you don't want, the easier it is to get it. Therefore, always follow your heart when making decisions because he'll show you the way to your dreams and how to make them become true!

No matter who you are, where you are or what you want, always remember that everything's possible!

Rules of seduction

"Seduction is always more singular and sublime than sex and it commands the higher price" (Jean Baudrillard).

There are several common principles about how to apply the game of meeting a partner, no matter how old you are, your cultural background or whatever country you may be in. This said, by following them, both men and women, heterosexual or even homosexual, may find, seduce and keep the person of their dreams.

Some would see such knowledge as common sense, but taking into account the number of people in this world, including very attractive ones, that can't get even one partner for years, we may also say that this knowledge isn't so well-known as it should be. Somehow, we're not educated to apply what we naturally wish for. And, as nobody teaches us to learn but everyone expects us to do it, nobody teaches us to seduce and have a relationship but everyone expects us to do it naturally as well.

May you, with all this knowledge, be as successful as everyone else that has applied it, not only in meeting more sexual partners but, most importantly, develop stable relationships and happiness through them. These are just the tools, but you have to use them in order to give them a purpose, and adjust them to yourself in order to find love.

Your life is in your hands. You just need to learn to be responsible for it with the right knowledge. So, learn with experience and develop yourself, not only to know more about others but, above all, to know yourself!

|  |

---|---|---

# BOOK 4: The Ultimate Sex Manual: Uncensored Secret Strategies (For Women) to Seduce and Fuck Like a Pornstar All Day Long

Introduction

Did you know that, according to several scientific studies, orgasms can relieve pain? Or, that while 75% of men always reach orgasm during sex, only 29% of women report the same? (by National Health and Social Life Survey)

Did you know that, according to the Museum of Sex, the vibrator was originally used as a medicinal treatment for female "hysteria" during the 19th century, as it helped dissipating hysteria's anxiety-related symptoms?

This book was a major success when launched for the first time, which proves that this knowledge is as urgently needed as also rare to find. It was written for women and combines the perspective of many that were interviewed for this purpose.

As the Sex Industry grows by the millions, and the number of women and men that want to be in Adult Movies increases as well, it becomes clear that everyone has hidden ideas, believes, thoughts, habits and curiosities that, somehow, need to be satisfied. This book was created to promote an uplifting assimilation of all them, by proposing an analysis of sex that is mature, realistic, educational and insightful.

Many books in the market, promoting modern but uncomfortable sex positions in order to increase women's pleasure, or showing them how to choose a good sex partner with the wrong rules, are far from the value that this book intends to offer. Here, you'll learn how to last longer, by knowing what to eat, drink and do, how to obtain maximum pleasure, how to have more fun and how to behave with multiple partners at the same time. Nevertheless, it doesn't forget the importance of meaningful relationships and their relation to sex, by describing the significance of its mind healing properties.

"Sex is a part of nature" (Marilyn Monroe), "energy" (Beatrice Wood) and "a conversation carried out by other means" (Peter Ustinov).

Where to find a sex partner

People that want sex usually go to clubs and bars, so it's much more about the how than the where. However, sexually aroused individuals can also be seen at the end of the day in some coffees shops, specially the most crowded.

The best days to find horny people are Sundays and Fridays, because tension built from a week's labor accumulates fatigue that the body seeks to expel by creating thoughts of pleasure associated with sex.

The more frustrations, pressure and stress a person accumulates, the more thoughts related to sex tend to have. It's therefore no surprise that the more sexual ones have specific stressful jobs, namely, business owners and managers. But, the same can be associated with the stress of heavy physic labor, or the one attributed to specific existential problems, such as failed relationships.

In all these cases, either under an extreme pressure of body or mind, the level of stress is above normal. And. following this principle, Friday appears as the most common day chosen to relax and have "new adventures", so the following step consists in finding a person that seems to be under stress.

The more a person works and the deepest is level of his work, the more you can be sure to be in front of someone very sexual, independently of how he appears to be, as people tend to hide more what they're not comfortable with or fear harming their reputation.

Stereotypes aren't the best way to judge people and as Peter North mentioned, regarding those that say "'You don't look like a Pornstar.' I think they had that stereotyped image of Porn Actors being ugly and slimy and perverted".

This said, it becomes evident why so many politicians, teachers, lawyers, doctors and judges, end up involved in sex scandals. Workaholics develop profound sexual needs as a form of compensating the demands of their work and avoid psychological disorders, such as depression and anxiety.

Nevertheless, you can also try meeting people for sex on Sundays and be successful in doing it, even though reality will slightly change, as you'll usually find lonely individuals that want sex in order to raise their self-esteem.

However, because these individuals tend to be more passive than the previous, they're also easier to be approached.

How to choose a sex partner

A horny man tends to be very visual and will look at most women around him, no matter who they are or how they look.

Most men won't refuse having a one night stand, and they're never as difficult to get as appearing to be. Everything depends on the approach, the moment and their level of interest.

When men are aroused, they can lose their mind very easily, even in public, and this is noticeable when they're being very active with their eyes, especially, when seeing beautiful women. But, this doesn't mean they'll approach a woman, as when aroused men don't know what to say or do.

This situation represents the ideal opportunity for a woman observing from outside, as she can easily take the initiative of approaching such men and be successful with that.

The best way to catch a sexual man, consists in not focusing in yourself but in his behavior instead. And, the man that reacts quickly to anything related to body parts, such as legs in posters on a wall, or the bottom of women passing by, is the one you want.

However, if you're not the target, it means that your appearance isn't sexy enough, even though it's not correlated to his need to have you in his bed.

During a conversation, other tendencies in a man's eyes can indicate how much he wants to have sex. As an example, if he's starring at your breast or at how sexual you are when talking to him, he's definitely having an inner conversation with himself about having sex with you or not, while imagining how you would look without clothes.

Men that are very sexual can't control themselves well, even though they are confident. The reason is that they're usually rejected in favor of those that don't show so much neediness. But, as most women are looking for love, and not sex, those that others reject tend to become better options.

Their speech should help in selecting the best, as the more his sentences adjust to yours, the more he's showing the ability to cooperate towards your orgasm. Remember that "Sex is emotion in motion" (Mae West).

If you have doubts, change subject often during a conversation, and notice how he reacts. If he doesn't react properly, show him that he's not following properly with the conversation and observe how he responds to that!

* If he gets angry with your behavior, that's the right man to have sex with;

* If he starts panicking or apologizing himself, forget him, at least as a sex partner;

* If he tries to be diplomatic, and ask for explanations, then you have here a quiet domination, which means he won't speak much during sex, but definitely try being in control;

Any of them could be good in bed, but the one with a more predominant character tends to have more success with women.

Rude men can be good sex partners, but you should be careful about how reasonable his rudeness is, at least when looking at the ethics of his behavior. If he has a proper reason to be rude, he'll also show stamina during sex, but you can be sure of this when touching him during his reactions.

When exchanging touches, allow him to touch you back and, if he doesn't, get closer! You should always try guiding him to your place without being explicit about it. Make him think that you want to simply borrow some CDs, or anything else that justifies having him in your apartment for a short period of time, while not giving any clue about the chance of having sex. And, once there, take the lead by being more sexually aggressive

It's not difficult to do this, and all experienced women know that is very easy to arouse a man, by touching, even slightly and apparently innocently, his groin. Once aroused, it's almost impossible for him to think, as the blood flows to his genitals.

You can pretend to touch his genitals by accident with any excuse you can find, like, while sitting next to him, looking into his eyes and saying: "Oh, that's so funny!". At the same time, you can pretend to be putting your hand in his leg, while putting it in his genitals. His face will change to a "what should I do now?", and that's when you can grab his hands and place them on your chest, asking if he likes them.

Although men are expected to be more active regarding sexual behavior, social morality and other ideas given by the media, puts them in a situation in which most don't know what to do or what's acceptable. And, that's the reason why they need to be guided by a woman.

Finding a sex match

The rules of attraction and seduction can differentiate according to men, women, or even homosexuals, even though they're usually related to how a person expresses himself.

Finding a sex partner in a big city, for example, shouldn't be difficult, as many individuals have the same purpose at the exact same time. So, why when two persons want to have sex, so may barriers emerge between them?

The answer to this question has been changing according to cultures and social values, but some things are universal.

* Men interact with the body, are visual and physical;

* Women are emotional, interacting more with their voice and eyes.

Billy Crystal simplified these differences by saying that " "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place". But, a more profound understanding of this sentence, tells us that you cannot arouse a man by talking about sex, but you can do this to a woman. While men have to be aroused with touch and stimulating images, such as the cleavage of a woman, for women, visual stimulation is usually not enough.

We could resume both perspectives in the fact that men are more physical, while women are more emotional. Or, that the shortcut to a man's heart is sex, reason why the so called bitches get men faster than other women.

However, you can't really keep a man just with such behavior, only seduce him. The rules of a relationship are the same for anyone, and are based on the following:

* Mutual respect;

* Mutual benefits;

* Positive emotions.

Sex doesn't necessarily follow the same rules and we could say that is related to the animal part of human beings, but we're not animals, and to think in such way is diminishing our chances of finding a good sex partner.

Humans are creative and emotional creatures, able to plan and change, not only with a set of abilities related to survival or competition, but interaction and self-development. And, those that know this are certainly better lovers than others, reason why Pornstars can surprise many with their politeness and honesty during interviews.

This said, we must remember that we can't simplify sexual attraction to a push of a button; it's more similar to a dance than a mechanism.

A direct approach can be more effective on men than women, but it must include a variety of other things, such as adjusting to his reaction, while allowing some feedback to occur. In fact, most women are confused about why some gestures work with some men but not others, and the reason is quite simple to explain. People aren't all the same, and individuality must be measured, not with preconceived ideas, but a proper understanding of it.

There are two kinds of men reacting differently to sexual approaches:

* One reacts like you're a bitch, if your propose is to have sex with him;

* Another says no to a question like, "do you want to watch a movie with me?".

But, nothing is wrong in both approaches, except the fact that you've applied them on the wrong person. If you say the opposite to each of them, the results will be positive.

The same applies to other situations previously described:

* You touch a man's chest, saying "wow, nice chest" and he freaks out, answering: "What's wrong with you?";

* You touch another one in his groin, saying "you're hard" and he replies: "Do I have to pay to have sex with you?.

Again, the solution is the same, meaning that both sentences were applied to the wrong men.

All men would be excited about having sex, except if the approach conflicts with their personal values.

In the past, it wasn't so complicated to have sex with someone, but in the last centuries quite a lot of reprogramming of social values was applied on people via the media, which changed their ideas about right and wrong.

If the vast majority of our society thinks that there's something wrong about being sexual or wanting sex all the time, or even about being a Pornstar, then there's something terribly sick with such society, because only addiction could be seen as bad and unhealthy, but nobody talks about the fact that you can't overdose from sex, but die from alcohol and drug abuse. Besides, there's still no better cure for depression and sadness than sex, and that's why Erotica novels sell so much. Idealistically, people should be living their own stories instead of imagining them.

This is the reason why such problems can only be studied from a humanistic perspective, as sex is part of who we are as human beings. Putting it in a box separated from daily life or refuse to talk about it, as if it was unhealthy to mention, wouldn't promote sanity, as we can't escape the fact that everyone was born because somebody had sex.

A healthy sex life is related to knowing what we want and who we are, and there wouldn't be so much sexual tension in today's world if people knew the answers to these questions.

Common and basic logic says that if two people want sex, they should have it, immediately.

How to talk a man into sex

The basics of seducing a man consist in increasing the number of times you touch him, while keeping the conversation normal and in friendly tone.

Physical interaction is very more important, even though the friendly smile and conversation are to be kept, more or less, depending on how much he cares about a certain topic.

Don't stop such interaction just because he doesn't make his own move! Men are slow in cooperating when talking or even understanding a women's purpose. Therefore, keep finding excuses to lean your head on him, touch his chest and his leg. Actually, the leg is one of the areas that can more rapidly stimulate a man's sexual organ, due to the blood flow going into that region, after a sexual though emerges.

There are many ways to do this, either while teasing him, with a strong touch in his leg followed by a: "I don't believe you. You are trying to trick me!", Or a "I'm so tired. Can I put my head on your lap while you talk?", if the conversation is lasting too long.

In any of these situations, there may be an excuse, or even many excuses, to develop further physical contact.

Men are often nervous about what to do next, due to the paradigm of what's socially acceptable blocking their masculinity, so you'll have to take the lead in the beginning until he awakes from such trance.

The idea that men like bitches exists due to the fact that they're easier to seduce. In other words, they do all the seducing for them. But, men don't necessarily marry bitches, unless they have a good relationship with them.

The main point is that common women are jealous with the fact that those special ones at least get a chance that they don't.

When seducing a man, remember to respect him, even if you tease him, as making him uncomfortable is a shortcut to becoming rejected. Compliments aren't as important for men as they are for women, but they should feel relaxed near a woman.

Physical contact creates proximity but must always follow a proper conversation in the same level. Therefore, invite him to your house for dinner or to share some kind of classes, in order to promote such interaction. Once you get an idea for a "only possible in his or my house activity", ask him: "Can you teach/show me?".

Most women can't really get it when the door of opportunity is open, but it makes the difference, and that's why many have a bad sex life or an historical of failed relationships behind them.

If a man tells you that he knows Kickboxing, ask him: "Can you teach me in a way that I don't get hurt?".

He will, and after that practice you can both have a drink in his house. This will happen if you plan well, such as practicing in a park near his place, and don't bring any bottle of water with you. But, you can also use the excuse of showering in his apartment after practice, and say that your shower is broken, that you forgot to pay the bill or whatsoever you can remember. It's very stimulating for a man, knowing that he has a naked woman taking a shower in his house. After showering, it's much easier to convince him to have sex, but you can even do that during shower, by asking him to change the temperature of the water, with the excuse that you forgot how to do it. And, if he's shy about it, just pull him in!

Nevertheless, these are just examples, as even chess can be an excuse to go to his apartment. And, if he's a person with an open mind, why not talk about sex and make him show you his porn collection?! If both don't have sex after this experience, something must be wrong in your or his head.

Knowing how to close the gap is very important, as you can't move from a coffee shop to a bedroom in one minute, even if you both run there. And, unless you teleport yourself with him, emotions are the best way to shorten distance.

Cooking can be a good way to attract a man, either in the afternoon or at night, although reasons that don't demand so much time work better for a shy woman.

Men tend to respond more effectively to what brings them knowledge and experience, and that's why women that know how to ask for a man's help in an intellectual or physical activity achieve their purpose faster than those trying to make them share awkward emotional experiences.

When to have sex

If you want sex with a man, you must make him expect it, even though he doesn't need to be sure of getting it. As men are simple, you should act with simplicity! But, forget any thought about love at first, because men can't understand love until they have enough sex with the same woman.

Those telling you something different are liars, virgins or bad sex partners.

It's true that men can and often fall in love with their best friends but, either it starts with sex or a friendship, it's still not love. And, if friendship lasts too long, sex will be weirder than and not as amazing as romantic movies tend to portray it.

According to male standards, if you date him for more than three times, sex is already predictable and normal to happen. And, if sex occurs in the first night, that won't make you a slut, unless he sees it in such way, but that depends on many factors, namely, his personality and insecurities.

The limitations that can be imposed on interaction before sex are easily perceived according the following rules:

* If a man talks to you for more than two hours in the first date, he's already behaving like a friendly person, so you can have sex with him in the same night;

* It's not so much about the quantity of the interaction but the way it occurs and how long it lasts;

* If you feel comfortable enough to talk anything to him, you're comfortable enough to show your naked body;

* Everything gets messy when you put love in first place and try to measure if he loves you back, as you shouldn't need that;

* Women that search for love before sex end up alone more often than they would like.

The ideal sex

You shouldn't be sexual without a reason, as it may break the mood. So, try making the other person feel relaxed first.

In Japan, millions of women pay to hear men talking to them, and that's actually seen as job. And, this happens because somehow people need to feel part of something more than their social life.

You shouldn't be afraid of behaving and talking life a girlfriend, and the more you do it, the easier it will be to be accepted as such, even if just for a one night stand. And, this is why although most people would say that talking isn't necessary in a porn movie, if you take the preliminary words and acts out of a scene, everything suddenly becomes strange and less exciting.

Fantasies and fun is what makes sex truly exciting and worth it, and it's because of such that so many Japanese men are addicted to comic book women instead of real ones.

Most people have fantasies about meeting strangers and having sex in public places, but reality doesn't seem to match their requirements. The same applies to sex, as our creativity is expected to be in the same level here as well.

A good lover, man or woman, knows how to please and tease in every moment, especially during sex, and won't be satisfied with a quick orgasm.

An important thing to remember is related to changing positions often, even though not necessarily copying what you see in books like Kamasutra, which aren't actually very practical, especially if you aren't into yoga practice.

You can use your creativity by focusing in your environment and places where you can have sex, instead of the position, which will instead adjust to the context. In other words, don't spend too much time in a bed, if a couch, table or chair is available.

Sex isn't a marathon as well, so don't be afraid to take breaks or slow it down, especially when orgasm is near. And, above all, don't think too much about your own pleasure, because women that do this, even if they had many sex partners in the past, can't truly enjoy sex.

Sexual pleasure comes from the need to go beyond orgasm, and that's something that even Nymphomaniacs may find hard to understand. On the other hand, this is the reason why Pornstars meet before acting, and are able to refuse a film if they can't feel a friendly connection with the person they'll have sex with, as often happens with many.

This issue is so important that mature women have realized men with big penises don't necessarily make good sex partners, while mature men stopped seeing women for their appearance only.

The reason why women usually don't enjoy porn movies, is that the ones made for men are often too nasty, while the ones for women tend to be too pretty. It's the combination of beauty with nastiness that makes a good movie and Pornstar, as that's also what most people are looking for in their private life. And, this is why people enjoy porn movies with celebrities so much. We love the combination of beauty with bestiality, in Tarantino style.

As Latinos say, "a saint at the table and a bitch in bed".

However, not any person is able to handle such level of interaction, so you can decrease anxiety by slowing down the rhythm and kissing more. There must always exist a balance between what both can do and want, regarding hardcore sex and emotions involved.

The common ground for agreement must be similar, even in an orgy. And, the less they are, the darker the lights should be, to avoid self-judgments and social stereotypes.

Sex skills

There's a lot to learn from Porn movies and, those who tell you the opposite, either can't assimilate such possibility or are hiding the fact that they also use them in their life. This is why Jenna Jameson said, "There are more facets to me besides spreading my legs".

What truly matters in watching porn is how you interpret it, therefore you must be aware of how your brain perceives information:

* The brain operates with Images;

* Images connected to emotions lead to concepts;

* A concept leads to believe.

Due to low self-esteem, religious values or social discrimination, most people are stuck in believes, not realizing that what they see is related to what they assume regarding sex. But, even though most porn isn't pedagogic, it can be used to reprogram our thoughts about sex.

I wouldn't say that showing porn in classes of Sexual Education, as some Teachers do, would be wiser than showing violent movies in a prison. But, as a self-educational tool, can be used for a better understanding of sexual behavior, if applied properly and under certain rules.

* Choosing a porn movie isn't the same as going to a freak show. So, you'll do more damage than good to yourself, by watching sex with dogs, horses or animated monsters, as it's now becoming a new tendency to replace bestiality;

* Choose porn according to what you're willing to do and take it one step further. So, if you're into common sex, watch threesomes, interracial sex and gangbangs, and see how you feel about these;

* Masturbation when watching porn is a practice with visual stimulation, which can help you relax during sex and last longer. Therefore, avoid watching for the purpose of having an orgasm, as this is what leads to addiction;

* POV or Perspective of Viewer movies are good to train the brain, and have been used in many fields, namely, to train Athletes and Soldiers. After the first edition of this book was launched, millions of copies were sold, and soon after that the sex industry started using this idea to take it further and create a one hour marathons of sex training, which wasn't as successful as common movies, because it failed its main purpose, which is to escalate the experience in levels of dynamics, and not just stimulation. In fact, the porn industry lacks ideas, and that's what attracts most people to watch porn when they feel bored. Nevertheless, this type of scenes can be good for shy women;

* Watching porn must be paralleled with a real life experience, to avoid damaging your self-esteem and personality. So, even though you may not have it, make sure you leave the house after watching a movie, to increase those opportunities;

* Don't worry if you spend more time watching porn than having sex, as you shouldn't evaluate your sex life in quantity but rather quality. The real problem starts when you can't do what you see on those movies, and to solve it you may need to share it with your partner, by watching the same movies together, instead of having an affair that compensates for that need;

Other things that you should take into consideration after developing the habit of watching good porn, are the following:

* When talking to men, keep the sexual images in your mind, and use them to relax and inspire your behavior, as nothing's bad if pleasurable and made real;

* Don't be afraid to talk about sex and do it every time you can. The most sexual cultures do it all the time. So, don't be surprised to hear that Latinos talk about sex openly among themselves, including during family dinner;

* It's the unveiling of sexual inhibition along with the mind programming to become a sex machine that progressively transforms you into a sex star, even if just between walls;

* If you can have sex for a longer period than most people, knowing how to give and receive pleasure, many would suspect your background and even become scared of not being able to satisfy you, but that's something you need to learn to accept and be proud. And, the fact is that, whatever your partners may say, they'll become addicted and even invite you to make movies together. But, that's how most Pornstars start their career;

* Being good with sex is like anything else in life. People will label you negatively, talk behind your back, disrespect you and imagine stories that aren't true. But you don't need to justify yourself or feel guilty for desiring good sex. Men should be the ones being ashamed for not being willing to give it to you, and learn how to do it without Viagra or any other cheating pill that damages health;

* Know that if you're afraid to become a sex addict, you'll lose the chance to have plenty of good sex in your life, as much as someone that is afraid to have money will never be rich.

Oral Sex

Even though seen as a complement to sex, oral sex must be seen as a way to stimulate both partners, taking into account that it tends to be much more fulfilling before sex.

However, calling it oral would be limiting the possibilities that the use of the tongue imply. During oral sex, do the following with the tongue:

* Explore the different parts of the body and according to your partner's reaction;

* Try different movements, namely spiraled, when stimulating the genitals;

* Use your hands at the same time, to stimulate other parts of the body.

Alternative movements between tongue and hand, can be both relaxing and stimulating, in men and women, and it wouldn't be a surprise if, in any case, orgasms are reached.

Swallowing the sperm after ejaculation, presents a more complete approach to sex, even though it doesn't necessarily has to happen.

Much more could be said about oral sex, but the purpose here is to merely show it as it is, while providing guidance in how to take advantage of it in the best way possible, instead of providing one thousands different techniques without any meaning.

Sex positions

Somehow, the pornographic industry has realized that there's not much to do regarding sex positions, as creativity is limited to the characteristics of the human body, but there aren't any barriers to the amount of external changes that can be applied to stimulate viewers.

It's easier to think about sex positions, if the place is first taken into consideration, and that's also how Pornstars improvise. But, even though you can memorize a whole book full of sex positions, nothing compares to those in which you can have sex without discomfort and achieve an orgasm easily.

There are three things to take into consideration when imagining new sex positions:

* How deep the penetration can be;

* Which place provides more stimulation;

* How practical it is.

Except for a very few position, most imply the man on top, because that's how penetration becomes deeper and orgasm is more easily reached. However, as most women enjoy doggy-style, here stimulation has to be managed in the environment, namely, by having it outdoors, in front of a discreet window or places where sex isn't so practical, such as the kitchen.

The same applies to the missionary position, which is much more convenient for a man when the woman is positioned on a table and he's standing, instead of traditionally laying down.

As for what regards deeper penetrations that help reaching orgasm, they're more easily applied when your back is leaning downwards, and this can be done with the use of pillows behind it or the corner of a couch.

As simple as this chapter may seem, you won't find better information about these issue anywhere else, because all the supposed secrets of sex are based on the same principles.

Nevertheless, it's important to know how to make a man last longer during sex, as it's based on rules as well, which even though they are unaware of, can be applied when a woman guides them into doing what she wants and when she wants it.

* Doggy-style is the most stimulating position for men, so it's better to choose it as the first;

* Men are less likely to reach orgasm when standing, and that's why Male Pornstars prefer such positions.

* Men can't last long in the same position, especially when excited, so you should stop when they're increasing speed, to guarantee your orgasm before theirs.

In fact, most people aren't aware that sex isn't a process from A to B, but rather a wave or alternative vibrations and feelings, in which speed and the stimulation of erogenous parts should be alternated continuously.

A man can last for up to one hour or more with such guidance, and without the use of any magic pill, like Viagra.

As for positions that are more stimulating for men, choose all those in which they can see the entire female body, namely your legs. And, that's why men enjoy it more when women are wearing high-heels or boots.

Apart from what was mentioned, it's always possible to explore new tendencies and know what men have been dreaming with, by exploring the Porn Industry and keep and open dialogue with your partner.

Sex with creativity

Toys, and more precisely sex-shops, are the best source of ideas to enjoy sex in a more creative way.

* Allow a man to stimulate you using toys for women;

* Allow a man to have different experiences, with toys for men;

* Buy costumes to make the experience more entertaining;

* Buy ropes with Japanese knots, to allow a new type of sensation to be explored.

Increasing the fun in sex and making it more relaxing, is the key to prolonged orgasms and more pleasure. Just like cooking, sex requires the right combination of ingredients, while applying them to different ideas.

Within this spectrum of possibilities, take into consideration that pain as pleasure should be an exception and not the rule. Often, sadomasochism originates from boredom and lack of ideas, instead of sexual creativity. And, that's why public shows and Erotica novels describing it are much more popular than private applications inside the house.

It's possible that an increasing stress and frustrations in today's world, have been leading many to manifest aggressively in sex, as a way to gain satisfaction, and it's true that those with the most demanding jobs tend to enjoy sadomasochism the most. However, it's also important to give room to new ideas, by wearing costumes of those you fantasize about or admire the most, such as superwoman, a sailor, a prostitute, etc.

Such choices aren't only pleasurable but also avoid cheating behaviors, by diminishing boredom related to sex and allowing the manifestation of sexual fantasies. It's like having sex with different personalities in a variety of worlds, while maintaining the same relationship in a high level of interest and sexual desire.

How to last longer in bed

The options related to food should always include what better helps in keeping endurance and energy for a longer period of time. And, the diet for sexual activities and sports isn't necessarily the same, even though both activities can be seen under the same perspective.

Sex is much more about controlling pleasure in a deep physical level, so the concept of energy here has a different application when comparing to sports, although with certain resemblances.

As an example, although you can do sports in many ways and following different routines of exercises, sex is much more about self-control, resistance and your ability to deal with both, while managing them at the same time. Therefore, intercourse is mostly related to your own sensitivity and how much you know your body.

This said, water is one of the most important elements to have at sight, as it helps the blood flow inside the body. But, massages are part of another ritual that can help with the flow of blood in the body, and it's a good idea to do and receive them before sex.

However, know that energy can be stored in the body if you eat vegetables and fruits during the day. This type of energy lasts longer and, specific fruits related to kidney cleansing, also known in Asia for helping with sexual endurance, are the ideal.

The most popular are the goji berries, and you can find them in most health stores. You can either make tea with them, which you'll drink in the previous hours before having sex, or make a juice, by mixing them with water and other fruits. Milkshakes may very well be the best combination if you want to have liquids, fruits and animal protein, all together, during an entire day.

The worse enemies of a good sexual endurance are sugar and heavy meats, as in both cases they can burn your energy quickly.

Control over your body is much more difficult if you don't feed yourself with the best and healthier ingredients, so when choosing what to eat, go for organic food and vegetables.

Know that masturbation, hours before having sex, also helps prolonging intercourse naturally, as it prepares the body for the act. And, if you're able to avoid orgasm, your body will be trained in handling pleasure and relax during sex.

This is how people keep a balance between their sex life and their daily life, as being a good sex partner is foremost a state of mind. However, once in that state, people will notice your confidence, which will lead them to feel attracted to you or hate you, if you don't satisfy their emotional or sexual needs. And, this is why sensual women have more problems by refusing sex than getting it.

At this point, what you need to remember is that if you're good enough, those you choose will always come back, and hardly breakup with you, but others may have difficulties in accepting that you have the power of choice. As Jenna Jameson said, "The funny thing about being a Pornstar is that everyone automatically assumes that they can sleep with you. This is what I do for a living. I don't just let anyone get into my pants".

The ultimate orgasm

There are three steps required to achieve the ultimate orgasm:

* Stimulation;

* Desire;

* Climax.

And, although they may seem abstract, carefully analyzing each provides a clear insight about why they must exist.

The first step is different between men and women, as although women are more sensitive to the sound of voice and to touch, men are essentially visual.

In a practical level, this means that men need to be stimulated by the visual appearance of a woman, which can be manipulated with the right clothing or fantasy costume, high-heel shoes and makeup. In fact, women don't need to take their clothes off when having sex and men won't really care about it.

However, as women are stimulated by hands and words, they may need to say to a man exactly what they want, as most don't have any proper Sexual Education and have never sought the need to have it. In other words, it means that you have to hold the hand of a man and put it where you want, but also ask him to tell you certain things. At least, in the beginning, it must happen in such way, but eventually any relatively smart man will pick up the tips and follow them by his own will.

As men are more visual, it also means they'll reach orgasm faster than usual when a woman is extremely beautiful or very young, reason why many only sense their manhood when a woman is average looking or less than that. And, that's also why they marry them, as these women won't make them feel a constant pressure that they can't deal with.

The type of man that can control himself when with an extremely sensual woman and give her orgasms, is the one addicted to activities that demand self-control in a healthy way, namely, sports. But, it's also true that a man with worries in his life will have much more difficulties to do this, reason why Prostitutes actually earn easy money, due to the fact that most of their clients can't last long.

So, if your partner has stress from work, helping him to relax before sex is important to guarantee that he'll be able to enjoy it.

The challenge is always higher for women, as they take longer to achieve orgasm and often can't. But, there are alternatives to help it:

* Having sex in places that are more stimulating for you;

* Taking breaks during sex to drink liquids, in which water or tea are the best options;

* Stopping sex with penetration in order to try other forms of sexual expression, namely, with the use of vibrators;

* Having oral sex.

There are two extremely well-hidden secrets that this practice will gradually allow unveiling, even though nobody will believe, once you describe your experience:

* Men can, just like women, have multiple orgasms without ejaculation;

* Women can have multiple orgasms without penetration.

There are many parts of the male and female body that are extremely sensitive, such as the neck, nipples, hears, stomach, and more. These sensitive areas increase desire, which leads to climax, with or without penetration. And, the longer the desire, the stronger and more prolonged climax will be.

How to behave at an orgy

The most challenging thing to do in sex is definitely having it in group. Nobody can do much more in an orgy than what they already do with their partners, reason why the famous Rocco Siffredi mentioned, regarding having sex with three women at the same time, "in my real life, I never do that; It's too exhausting".

In these situations, strategy is the most important thing to remember in order to last longer than usual.

* Visual stimulation can be decreased with colorful lights or lights of low intensity;

* When changing sex position, change partner as well;

* When about to reach orgasm, change your role and avoid penetration;

* Choose giving oral sex between breaks;

* Take breaks to drink lots of water

* When being penetrated by two partners, use your hands and mouth to stimulate them at the same time;

* Stimulate partners that aren't penetrating you, by using your hands to masturbate them;

* Self-control is extremely important, so don't drink alcohol before the event;

* Choose parties in which participants are mature and have experience, or try being sensitive to common needs and expectations if it's not the case;

* Men should always be in dominating positions, namely, by standing;

* Avoid emotional attachments, by being in parties with masks;

* Avoid psychological stress, by not bringing a partner or friend with you, or not seeing them during the orgy.

Before these parties, other things should be taken into consideration:

* Keep a good diet, by avoiding meat and sugar;

* Prepare dishes that include, at least, 70%, of various vegetables;

* Do exercise in a daily basis;

* Drink plenty of water in the previous days;

* Finally, take these events as experiences that help you learn more about yourself, and don't expect all members to do the same things in sex, but respect their differences. And, see it as a relaxing gathering that should be enjoyable and fun for everyone.

How to behave after sex

Sex isn't the end of a sexual encounter, and even though it's true that men burn much more energy than women, reason why many fall asleep afterward, it can and should be followed by hugs or holding hands, which maintain the bound between a couple.

It's important to remember as well that, in whatever situation, a person shouldn't abandon his or her partner after sex, as it leaves both with a feeling that they just did something physical without any purpose. And, even though it's a bad tendency seen nowadays, it's damaging to the psyche and self-esteem of both, the one that abandons and the one being abandoned.

A few moments of kissing, for example, are a much healthier way to finish sex in any given circumstance, and Sexual Education should be focusing on these kind of behaviors when presented to teenagers or adults, as it's much more relevant than knowing how to use your tongue in oral sex.

Human beings are emotional and creative creatures, not just animals, but it's the idea behind sex as being something primitive and basic, related only to penetration, that damages the mind of many people, while destroying their ability to reach a liberating orgasm, which then they believe to find with a secret formula, but can't, as sex without compassionate behaviors won't lead to pleasure.

I would say that humans are guided and fueled by love, but I believe this is something everyone eventually needs to discover by himself, even if needing to have sex with multiple partners to realize it.

This said, always remember to make the person that had sex with you feel loved and not used, even if it was just a one night stand, because nobody should feel guilty for that. Ultimately, sex shouldn't occur without mutual respect, and this is something that even the Porn Industry knows.

The option of finishing an encounter after sex shouldn't leave scars in anyone, but it shouldn't also close doors to the possibility of a more significant relation. However, if your purpose is to only have sexual encounters with men, avoid attachment with any in the initial stage, by not allowing that the timing between encounters opens space to the development of emotions, as the fear of loss will lead to jealousy and suffering. And, never have sex with the same person in the following days after the first sexual encounter. Allow, at least, one to two weeks difference, and have sex with others meanwhile, but never provide false promises of love and future relationships to anyone, as it can lead to more complications affecting your life and emotions.

Finally, remember that respecting other individuals is the same as respecting yourself, and safe sex is literally as important as a crime or death sentence, applied to you and others.

The Playerette's code

Real life isn't a movie or a fairytale, so the ideas these two pass into our minds should be forgotten if we truly want to understand things as they are. If you want to have sex with someone, don't expect more or less than that, but do it properly!

* First comes the small talking;

* Then the body should communicate the rest;

* And, finally, comes the communication of bodies with sex.

As men aren't much worried about emotional consequences after sex, women shouldn't either. In fact, you may scare a man by telling him that you love him before having sex. Here's an example of a very short relationship:

* A woman with a great body, that isn't interested in having sex;

* Falling in love too fast;

* Talking about the future for both;

* Not showing any sexual interest, even during conversations;

* Making a man feel trapped before even having sex.

Your sex life is just a game and you must know how to play it, never being afraid of what others may think or say! This is how to play it:

* Focus in getting as many players as possible;

* Try getting them all at the same time;

* Have sex with those you want without promises or remorse;

* Choose one to keep;

* Develop a relationship with that person;

* If it fails, play the darts of fate again and see what luck and a good strategy bring you next;

* Don't lie to yourself or the men with you;

* Allow attachments to occur, but only when you're ready to have one and only one. Otherwise, you'll payback with mental disorders, as many women with different sex partners do;

* It's very difficult to keep a normal relationship and affairs at the same time, so be honest with yourself first.

Above all, remember that self-respect is the basis of a fulfilling sex life and a great relationship with your own existence. You can follow such path by adjusting the rules of the game into your life:

* Discover the man that stares at women the most;

* Approach him, without letting him see your intention;

* Challenge his manhood with questions, while acting on your impulses;

* Give him permission to act on his desires, by coming closer to him;

* Use plenty of physical interaction;

* Take him to your place with an excuse that leaves sexual ideas apart;

* Be innocently sexual when touching his groin;

* Wait for the moment in which he feels confused about what to do, to be sexual;

* Tell him exactly what you want before and during sex;

* Don't allow him to reach his orgasm before yours;

* Change positions often to increase do prolong sex;

* Be honest with him and yourself.

|  |

---|---|---

# BOOK 5: The Rules of Love: The Truth about Compassion, Attraction and Romance

Introduction

Love and breakups are part of an existential cycle that nobody can live without, even though they manifest in different levels and under a variety of unpredictable scenarios.

The emotional suffering and joys that such experiences bring can't be erased from memory, so it's important to confront them and analyze personal believes wisely. Such exercise requires the understanding of the purpose of love and its positive outcomes. And, even though it may be interpreted differently by each person, it can be conceptualized and redefined according to experience.

The most common approach to love is the need to share a life together with another person, which allows us to label those we meet as willing or unwilling, while being aware of who we attract and reject. This said, relationships fail when the path shared diverges into more than one single direction. However, the one being rejected knows that he or she has failed in providing something necessary for the two paths to become unified. As an example, a woman that criticizes men, makes them feel rejected and unloved, decreasing their compassion towards her. And, this happens because there's a contradiction between sharing a common purpose while holding to divergent believes.

The problem with breakups and divorces is that nobody wants to confront the problem and tell the other what went wrong, but he or she, will naturally need to make his own assumptions and conclusions, in order to find peace in his or her mind. Affairs are the most common assumptions, but even this can be justified by an unhealthy relationship, either they exist or not.

There are unknown rules in love, which lead to all kinds of difficulties related to maintaining a healthy relationship, but, if known, could allow maximizing the success of existing ones as well.

Attraction and Respect

The following principles represent the relation between attraction and respect:

* What we show, often determines our value to others in a first approach, but what we do and say, will then determine our value for a relationship;

* The one that has little chances of having a proper relationship, hasn't given him or herself enough value, because he or she hasn't learn about self-love, but the one that has little chances of maintaining a relationship, hasn't given enough value to the other person.

The concept of love, even though tends to be misinterpreted, is based on the existence of given and received value, a transaction, not based on gaining but giving. Those that say "I love myself", should...

* Care about looking attractive;

* Buy clothes that make them look beautiful;

* Do regular exercise to be in shape;

* Learn to appreciate the best in others;

* Be pleasant when talking to other people.

The problem with people claiming that they love themselves, is that they're often not willing to change, and instead hide in the excuse of "this is who I am, and people should love me as I am". So, they want others loving someone that's not actually lovable.

This behavior makes as much sense as saying "I love my dog", while feeding him with rotten food, not giving him a bath and not allowing him to socialize with other dogs.

Accepting Love

It doesn't make sense saying "I love you" and offer gifts to our partner, while expecting him or her to accept them as proves of our love. The most significant demonstration of love doesn't need to be spoken or shown. And, in fact, the biggest challenge you'll ever face in a relationship consists in proving your love without words or gifts. But, it's also a fact that most people need measurable demonstrations of affection to believe in love, even though they're related to their perception of it.

In order to pass this challenge yourself, you have to understand the meaning of loving someone, because your partner may be able to love you and feel love from you without hearing words or receiving awards for it. And, loving someone means the following:

* Understanding how you can help your partner;

* Being present and hearing, when your partner needs support;

* Knowing how your partner thinks, but without using this to your advantage;

* Give him or her suggestions related to things you can help with;

* Support his or her plans, whatever they may be.

Above all, remember these rules in every moment of the day, but also when cooking, having sex and spending time outdoors. And, don't blame yourself if others are unaware of what you do, as they won't find it anywhere else.

People often reject love because they feel undeserving and, unfortunately, this is exactly what happens when you do everything you should and nothing seems to work. But, nobody can have more love in life when changing their relationship, except replace it by the same, given by someone else.

This is the irony of life, because, love doesn't change with country, culture or race. And, if you change country, for whatever reason, you'll soon realize that you're experiencing very similar challenges to the ones you previously had.

A wise person, however, won't ever let love go away from his or her life.

There isn't such thing as soul-mates, in the sense of one being belonging to another, but we can't perceive reality in another perspective than the one presented to us, therefore we have the strong innate desire for belonging, reason why breakups can be so painful. Nevertheless, it's also based on the same principle that relationships last forever, with or without marriage, as love is essentially the art of giving.

Compassion

The purpose of love is the development of the ability to feel compassion for another being, while learning to respect him and ourselves in that path and in extension towards our life meaning.

Everyone is different and has characteristics that you may or not like, so, we can't really talk about imperfection, because often one man's trash is another man's gold, and the same applies to women, but we do have preferences and needs, therefore, accepting what you can't change and demanding necessary changes are part of the art of compassion in relationships.

This said, respecting another person means...

* Expressing your ideals without offending him or her;

* Avoiding criticizing or diminishing the other person.

As an example, if you want your boyfriend to take his shoes when entering the house, you can say something as, "I like to have my house clean, so please take off your shoes". And, this sentence, in a proper tone of voice, will lead to his assimilation and cooperation. But, a refusal would clearly mean disinterest in showing compassion.

It's possible to say that one person loves more than another, in the sense that compassion is measurable, but real love is mutual and equal. Nevertheless, it's noticeable that people have different levels of sensibility and relationships often fail due to selfish attitudes in life. You can't be sensitive to others, if focused merely within your own reality.

Measuring Love

You can feel love, but the act of being in love demands more than a feeling. It's about sharing emotions.

The word love has been so misused that now we say "I love my car", "I love my house" and, meanwhile, we forget that a non-shared love can't fulfill a person.

Love is the art of giving because, when feeling compassion for someone, you feel good in offering things, but you also want to touch the hair, hands and body of that person, as you feel something special when doing that.

If your companion reacts to loving acts with hate and anger, then we can't say there's love, or at least not real love, even though we can call our behaviors lovable demonstrations.

Real love occurs when mutual, and this leads us to another misunderstanding in current social values, namely, believing that real love is suicidal, not pro-survival, and based on drama or suffering.

Love isn't selfish, but lack of self-love is, so the less we have, the more we demand. When feeling good in caring for another person, you're giving love and, when that person gives back, then both have a loving relationship - you're both in love. This happens, because of three forgotten rules related to love:

* Help is the primary reason for life;

* Purpose in helping, is the main guidance for existence;

* Love, is the ultimate meaning of existence and life.

They're all connected to truth, which can only manifest when we're honest towards our own ideals. But, if these ideals become corrupted, then the opposite happens:

* Honesty can't occur, when we trust self-judgment to society or God;

* Responsibility won't manifest, when we excuse our behavior with blame;

* Loving actions won't occur, when we fear not receiving them as well.

Following the same principles, we can say three things:

* Love is the development of compassion;

* Love is about maturing and learning in the exercise of compassion;

* Love is the extension of compassion, from self to the world.

There's a very specific experience that human beings need to accept, in order to understand how to love and grow in their own humanity by maturing their soul. Love is not about...

* Forcing our partner to give us what we want;

* Demanding respect with manipulation and wars;

* Wanting social acceptance due to selfish desires.

Redefining Love

You only truly become mature in relationships if learning something from each of them and not by accumulating several during life. And, this leads us to another more polemic topic, entitled polygamy.

As human beings, we do have the potential to be polygamist and love several individuals at the same time. However, there are many social misconceptions about love that lead to suffering and they're the real reason why we can't be polygamist.

One of the first misconceptions is that love implies sex. But, this isn't true, as you can love someone in the same way without having sex. And, in fact, you can give an orgasm to another human being, without even having physical penetration but merely contact with his or her skin.

Humanity on Earth hasn't developed enough to reach the understanding that hands hold the extension of the body's energy and, by connecting them to another person's body, it's possible to lead him or her into an orgasm, when the mental state of both is suitable and open enough for intimacy.

Another misconception is related to jealousy, originating in the need for commitment and based on the fear of being disrespected and abandoned.

When human beings learn to be honest with one another and don't fear losing each other, then it's possible to stop feeling jealousy to share love, but most people are unable to reach this stage, and as humanity keeps promoting dishonesty, it will keep being more difficult in the future.

Finally, one of the most significant misunderstandings is sex, still seen as a very private, dirty and occult experience.

Sex is just a form of expression, related to the extension of the connection we can create with another being, and it's better felt when we develop compassionate feelings for that being. This happens after, naturally, we're able to properly communicate with him or her. In other words, when you learn to open your mind and express freely with another person, you're initiating the basics of what amazing sex requires. But, if you can be yourself with many people, then having multiple sex partners is natural and not shameful or weird.

We must also understand that, in the combination of all these elements, rules exist to guide us into mutual respect and, more importantly, accepting or not a polygamist relationship is also accepting the conscious decisions of our partners regarding this issue. That's why, in some religious societies, there's marriage between those that have sex in group, so that respect isn't broken and the connection always maintains itself with complete honesty. Under these rules, the principles of love are maintained and the benefits are equal to having a relationship between two individuals.

Unconditional Love

There aren't limitations to love, except the ones we impose within ourselves. But, we must be aware of them, so that we don't get trapped in our own misconceptions.

As an example, as many people believe that love is more important than relationships, they often suffer when having feelings for someone that doesn't love them back, ending up dreaming with a relationship that can't work. In this situation, their suffering isn't caused by love but the way it's experienced.

Before accepting love in our hearts, we must first be reasonable about what we want in life, as love does conquer all, but only when two people are involved in that desire. When only one is involved, we should call it emotional manipulation, narcissistic love, misdirected love, delusional love or selfishness, but not true love.

The word love assumes many applications in Latin languages, reason why they're called romantic. Knowing some of these words can help us in thinking about love in a different and more complete form. Here's an example in four different languages (Portuguese, Spanish, French and Italian) to explain how our perception of love is shaped by language, as well as cultural and social background:

* The English sentence "I Like You" can be used with anyone, but the Portuguese equivalent, "Gosto de Ti", is only used when we're falling in love with someone, even though not in the same level of being in love. The French equivalent "Je t'aime", however, is direct and means "I love you", leaving no space between "liking someone" or "feeling love, without being in love";

* The English sentence "I Love You", assumes the same selfish attitude in nearly all romantic languages, namely, with the Spanish "Te Amo", the Italian "Ti Amo" and the Portuguese "Amo-te", showing the same meaning as in English. It's as saying that love doesn't require reciprocity in order to exist, even though, ironically, people always expect their partner to repeat the same sentence after mentioning it.

The obvious difference is seen in the French "Je t'aime", which is used to express love, but actually literally means "I Like You". This leads us to the understanding that the French culture, known for its excessive demonstrations of love, actually never assumes love as it is, but merely as a form of friendship, which can't be accepted without an unrestricted profound relation. Could this explain why the French are known for not easily commit to anyone? It's clearly a possibility, as language influences our thoughts and ideas, like a code for moral conduct;

* The meaning of "love affair", on the other hand, doesn't have any equivalent in Portuguese, Spanish or Italian, but only in French, with "Liaison Amoureuse", which literally means "A link with someone else", and it would be the same as seeing love linked to more than one person, or a network of love connections.

As interesting as it may seem comparing languages to analyze behaviors, it also proves that society hasn't become mature enough to assimilate other ways, as well as more profound meanings, of expressing love and understand it.

In over 2000 years, the world hasn't differentiated itself much, when comparing to the mother of most languages, Latin:

* In Latin, affair is translated as "Amores", meaning "being in love with more than one person";

* "I Love You", is translated as "Te Amo, but "I Like You", has no translation, which proves that the first Latinos were even more self-centered than we are nowadays, and may have significantly impacted the idea of pride that we now see in possessing things we love, namely, a beautiful husband or wife, a rich lifestyle and a family to make us proud.

Often, the wisest attitude in a relationship in which there isn't any sharing of common values regarding compassion and willingness, is breaking up, no matter how strong the feelings may be, because those emotions can be compensated by other loving acts, such us loving oneself. And, as love isn't possible when the soul is deprive from self-love, we should first focus in understanding how our live matches the live of another being, instead of believing that love is something uncontrollable and in the hands of destiny. Destiny only offers what we already believe.

* If believing we can love without self-love, we won't be loved;

* If believing love brings suffering, we'll attract problems to our relationships;

* If believing love is a sacrifice, we'll feel it only when in pain;

* If believing we don't deserve love, we won't have true love;

* If believing love needs proves, we won't find them.

Only truth can show what love is, but it can't be seen in delusional appearances, found between written words or understood by an unwilling mind.

Our potential to experience love is proportional to our will to accept it as it is, and not as it seems or as we've been told to believe.

Love is as a loving heart feels!

The extension of love

The more you love yourself, the less you need someone to love you, even though you may desire to share love.

Love flows from needing to receiving and then from needing to giving.

* First you need to be loved, and that's why parental love is so important as, without it, you end up needing love all your life. And, people that suffer the most due to lack of love were not loved enough during childhood;

* Then, you need to learn to receive love, and if you had good relationships you aren't afraid to receive it. But, if you had bad relationships, you need to relearn how to receive love from another person and allow yourself to be loved.

* Finally, when you love yourself enough and you're happy with whom you have become and have chosen to be, then it'll be easy to feel more love when giving it to someone else. You'll feel good in your heart by helping and caring for others, and in that act you'll also feel stronger and confident.

It's when this happens that you really mature in your experience inside love.

# About the Publisher

**Visit us **at http://www.22Lions.com & **Follow Us on Facebook** at http://fb.com/22Lions
