 
Lust of the Eyes

### (Temptation Series – Book 1)

Christian Novella

By H. H. Fowler

Copyright 2014 H.H. Fowler

Smashwords Edition

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

All characters, names, descriptions, and traits are products of the author's imagination. Similarities of actual people – living or dead – are purely coincidental.

### Other Books by H. H. Fowler

The Church Boyz' Series

Rod of the Wicked – Book 1

When Things Go Wrong – Book 2

My Last Cry – Book 3

After the Rain – Book 4

The Church Gurlz' Series

Mother's Black Book – Book 1

In the Presence of My Enemy – Book 2

The Aftermath – Book 3

Behind Closed Door Series

Shattered Dreams – Book 1

Poison Candy – Book 2

Unexpected Guest – Book 3

Temptation Novella Series

Lust of the Eyes – Book 1

Lust of the Flesh – Book 2

Pride of life – Book 3 (December 2014)

Stand Alone Titles

Javier

Jezebel's Apple

The Devil Made Me Do It (Short Story)
Connect with H.H. Fowler on Twitter:

@fowlerguy1

Website: www.hhfowler.com

Blog: www.churchboyz.org

www.facebook.com/www.churchboyz.org

### CONTENTS

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

A Sneak Preview of Book 2 – Lust of the Flesh

Questions to Ponder

From the Desk of H.H. Fowler
For everything that belongs to the world – the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride in one's lifestyle is not from the Father, but is from the world.

1 John 2:16
Prologue

True Deliverance Divine Ministries

"Kindly turn with me in your bibles to Genesis 39," the old preacher announced in a commanding voice, "beginning at the sixth verse. I will be reading from the NLT version because it leaves little room for mindless interpretation. The word of God reads as thus: So Potiphar gave Joseph complete administrative responsibility over everything he owned. With Joseph there, he didn't worry about a thing – except what kind of food to eat.

"Joseph was a very handsome and well-built young man, and Potiphar's wife soon began to look at him lustfully. 'Come and sleep with me,' she demanded. Let us drop down to the tenth verse: She kept putting pressure on Joseph day after day, but he refused to sleep with her. I will pause here, for I'll extract my message from here. Turn to your neighbor and look them dead in the eyes. Make sure your expression is stern when you ask them this question: What in the world are you lusting after? That is my topic for this blessed Sunday morning, which will be part of a series over the next six weeks. It's high time the people of God are properly taught on the three areas of temptation."

I squirmed in my seat, along with about ninety percent of the congregation. I was certain many of them were thinking the same thing I was thinking: This sermon could be viewed as a blatant invasion of privacy and I surely didn't want the elderly lady sitting next to me asking such a personal question – even if it was designed to be rhetorical. So I stared straight ahead, pretending as if I didn't hear the old preacher.

But then the preacher roared, "Don't you be afraid of anyone in this church! Ask them! Because half of you in here are guilty as charged. Every day we see things that are pleasing to ours eyes and if we aren't careful, our desires could become contaminated. In John 2:16, the Apostle of Jesus called it the lust of the eyes – the first area I will focus on this morning. Then we'll go in depth about the lust of the flesh, concluding with the pride of life..."

While the preacher was speaking, I felt a firm grip on my arm. I heard the gentleness of the elderly woman's voice before I turned to face her.

"My dear," she said with a smile so pleasant that I was sorry to have ignored her. "What in the world are you lusting after?" She then patted my knees. "But tell it to Jesus, honey, because your secret will always be safe with Him."

I gave the elderly woman a tight smile and turned my attention back to the preacher. If this was how it was going to be over the next six weeks – me sitting in a straitjacket – I may consider taking a brief sabbatical until the old preacher moved on to something else.

"Yes, my brothers and my sisters, the eyes find many things appealing," he shouted. "Maybe a beautiful home will get your attention, or an expensive car. Maybe a custom-designed yacht or a mouth-watering piece of cheesecake. Then, let us not forget about the appeal of the opposite sex – and for some, it is the appeal of the same sex. However, I dare say that human attraction is one of the greatest avenues Satan uses to tempt.

"In fact, many of God's people struggle in this area of temptation – in particular, the young and the impressionable. I always say that God is not going to stop creating beautiful people. The problem comes when we allow our hearts to become set on obtaining these desires using illegal means, as we see here in our text. The bible said that Potiphar's wife longed to sleep with Joseph. But she didn't just stop there; she pressured him every day to commit a grave sin against God and against her husband.

"'Lie with me, Joseph,' she desperately pleads. A married woman, a woman who had everything going for her. She was not satisfied, but rather became consumed with Joseph's good looks and his muscular build. So much so until one day she eventually tore his coat off of his body. What desperation! That is what unbridled lust will do to an individual. Lust in the dictionary is described as having a strong desire, to crave, to covet or to yearn. And in the case of Potiphar's wife, I would say that she thirsted for, or panted after Joseph with such a potent sexual desire that it made her behave indecorously. Have you ever found yourself in such an ungodly position?"

From the moment the preacher raised the question, I was wary of his intentions. I have been attending this church for well over two years, but I've never heard the preacher make such bold attempts in his messages. Had someone gossiped to him or had he truly received a divine impartation from God? You see, about a week ago, my best friend, Jennifer Dangerfield introduced me to Taj Brooks, her dashing fiancé. And ever since then I couldn't get his striking features out of my mind. But let me digress to pose my own question because I may be perceived as being duplicitous, when in fact, at the core of my soul my aim was to do the right thing.

But have you ever experienced a stare from a fine-looking stranger so powerful that it pulled you completely out of your element? And even if you did regain some measure of composure, you're left grappling with shameless fantasies too ungodly to share with anyone. That kind of magnetic pull doesn't happen with just anybody. Well, that was how my initial encounter was with Taj Brooks. The instant our gazes connected, my body began to express itself in some very uncomfortable ways. My heart palpitated and acute nervousness kept my tongue glued to the roof of my mouth. But maybe I had allowed my gaze to linger a little too long and received a jolt of envy over the fact that my best friend had been able to secure a man so gorgeously handsome – if I could use that as a description.

So if that constituted me as having a strong desire for my best friend's man, then I guess the preacher had every right to expose my sins. However, I didn't see how the scripture about Potiphar's wife applied to me, because I wasn't longing to have intimate relations with Taj. I had merely admired his attractiveness and hoped that one day God would bless me with my own husband. I was very careful not to let my emotions run away with me. Taj belonged to my best friend and I had accepted that – even though I didn't agree with the way they connected.

Relaxing my shoulders, I kept my focus on the old preacher as he continued to build steam in his authoritative voice. Admittedly, it was a very interesting message, which thankfully reminded me to be on the lookout for those evil little traps. But I knew my boundaries and I knew that I would never hurt my best friend by going after her man. That was just not a part of my genetics. So truly, this message was not really for me.

### THREE MONTHS LATER
Chapter One

It had now been about three months since Taj Brooks migrated from Florida – about as long as he and Jennifer had been engaged. Like I said, I was okay with that until she revealed that they'd met on Facebook and had decided to streamline the relationship process after having communicated for less than a month. Taj moved in with Jennifer and before long she was repetitively bragging about their bedroom antics. I hadn't any other choice but to assume that they were doing stuff only a married couple should be doing. And that was a big no no in my book.

Not only had Jennifer gone against her spiritual conviction as a new convert to Christianity, but she showed little regard for my lectures about purity and abstaining from the pleasures of the flesh. Her philosophy was that a person only has one life to live and must strive to live it without regrets, which included taking a risk on marrying someone she barely knew. And then she had the audacity to add, 'it is better to marry than to burn.'

Problem was, Jennifer wasn't burning. As long as she continued to let Taj stay in her bed, freely giving in to his seductive charms, she was only nourishing her carnal desires. I feared nothing would be left for their honeymoon – or of her spiritual conviction. But Jennifer had always been an adventurous devil and downright stubborn, even as far back as when I'd first met her in the eight grade. Her bold, sassy approach to life was the flip side to my reserved, introverted self. But by the same token, I, Sierra Lloyd had vowed to persist as a devout Christian.

That being said, I would not be a hypocrite and say that my admiration for Taj Brooks had diminished. In fact, within three short months it may have blossomed into something else I was too ashamed to admit. Do I dare categorize it as lust, as that old preacher had so ably conveyed for those six weeks? I wouldn't know because I'd purposely stayed away to protect my pride. Maybe it was lust, and if so, I certainly did not picture myself becoming a victim. Overall, I'd kept my distance and my vow to God that I would not allow whatever I was feeling for Taj to interfere with my friendship with Jennifer.

However, though I found these unwanted feelings extremely burdensome, because the more I sought to get rid of them the more they persisted, there were times I fully indulged them –especially when Taj was in my presence. I would appraise his every feature before I would suddenly become aware of it. I loved how his refined looks and effortless allure, complemented his lean physique, which was usually ornamented in a black suit he wore for his profession as a private limo driver.

When he laughed his dimples became pronounced and mesmerizing. Jennifer told me that Taj was of Indonesian descent, pleasantly mixed with a dose of Peruvian blood. I was not sure if Jennifer had been exaggerating at that point; however, I could certainly understand why she would want to swipe Taj off the market as soon as she could. He was unquestionably an incredible catch.

Being a second-generation Canadian-Bahamian by heritage, I had a strong propensity for well-put-together men. Men like Taj Brooks, were the quintessential models of my taste in looks, personality, height, and overall swagger. That was probably one of the main reasons why my feelings persisted. I desired a man who possessed similar traits. But if I allowed my errant thoughts to have their way, I knew it could land me in hot water. Because something as simple as Jennifer telling me that Taj was planning to show up this evening at our usual Friday night games, caused my heart to leap with excitement.

I felt horrible basking in Taj's visits, but it was difficult not to. Believe me, I was studying every scripture on temptation to help thwart giving in to these feelings. But it seemed like the more I studied the word of God, the greater my fight became. Maybe I should have sat under that old preacher for those six weeks and listened to what he had to say. Back then, I simply thought I could have handled those unwanted feelings on my own. Now here I was waiting on God to bless me with my Boaz, but at the same time I was jealous that my best friend's marital status was about to be changed by a man I wished was mine. Talk about misery!

So picture this: When my door buzzed, I almost fell on my face trying to answer it. I invited Taj and Jennifer into my one-bedroom flat on Paradise Island – which was considered the premier of real estate properties in the Bahamas. As a licensed real estate professional with the renowned Smith, Robinson and Bradshaw Realty, I got to live like the privileged lived – an exclusive lifestyle that was the envy of many. But I was not like the spoiled rich kids who turned their noses up at people less fortunate than them. Though my deceased parents had left me enough money to open up a minimart, I decided to follow my dreams by enrolling myself into college, working hard and then establishing a ceiling on how extravagantly I would live my life.

"Hi, Sierra," Jennifer beamed as she sashayed into my foyer. "So happy my man could come with me tonight."

I zeroed in on Taj and tried not to make my stare too obvious. But as luscious as he looked wearing that devilish smirk, it was extremely hard for me to keep my senses intact. He then began to chomp down slowly on a piece of gum, which made his mouth look marvelous in motion. Lord, Jesus, help me! This ain't right – the way I'm painstakingly appraising this man.

"As usual, you guys are early," I said as I leaned over to kiss Jennifer's cheek. I was about to press my lips against Taj's mahogany skin too, but instead, I lithely placed my hand into his and tried not to melt into a puddle of water. "Taj...nice of you to return to our Friday night games, despite your being the only male."

His smirk turned into a full grin, and I immediately felt a flush of heat behind my ears. "I really don't mind." His voice had a hoarse-like quality to it. He then added with a glint of mischief in his eyes, "Besides, I get a front-row seat to what you women talk about when we men are not around."

Jennifer rolled her eyes, and grinned. "He just wants to be around me," she cooed. The black fitted dress she wore boldly showed off her curvaceous figure. And even though I worked hard to augment my more appealing assets, somehow, I still appeared malnourished in my shoulders and arms with little assurance of ever looking as filled-out and as supple as my girlfriend. With a hand to her side, Jennifer spun, pausing to face me with one foot in front of the other. "He tells me every day how addictive I am. How beautiful I am...'Can't get enough,' he complains. I'm ashamed to even mention what he told me on the way over here."

Of all the emotions in the world, it was jealousy that punched me in the stomach, which was strange because Jennifer was openly gloating about the sin in her life. I should have slapped her with a rebuke from God's word, but instead I was envious. I cleared my throat and then cracked a smile that probably didn't reach my eyes. "What are you guys having to drink?" I asked as I began walking ahead of them toward my gourmet kitchen. I was still jealous and trying my hardest not to show it.

"I'll have a glass of water," Jennifer said, flaring her nostrils. "Because you are always out of alcohol."

"Whatever," I quipped. "You know I don't believe in keeping alcohol in my fridge. This is a holy place."

"Sierra," Jennifer called in that priggish tone I couldn't stand but loved at the same time. "You must take better care of your best friend. I may not be around forever. Didn't Jesus turn water into wine? What's wrong with having a little alcohol now and then?"

I ignored Jennifer and directed my question to her fiancé. "What are you having, Taj?"

"Whatever you're having," he said.

My gaze found Taj's the same time Jennifer reached up and pressed her freshly painted lips against his mouth. "Hold tight, sweetie," she said. "I'm going to the bathroom for a sec. When I return, Sierra, please have an answer to my question. Because I really don't see anything wrong with a Christian drinking alcohol."

"You already know my stance on alcohol," I said. "And I'm not changing it for you or for anyone."

Jennifer grinned as she walked away. Her lipstick had left Taj's lips a shade pinker and more desirable than they already were. He cleared his throat, which forced me to drag my gaze from his lips, connecting them to his deeply set eyes. The hazel hue was a gorgeous contrast against his mahogany complexion. I could see in his eyes that he knew his presence was altering my senses. I imagined he was secretly loathing my thin frame, because I dared not believe that he found me more appealing than Jennifer, whose body was so much curvier than mine. Lord, please, help me to stay focused!

"So, how's the real estate business here on Paradise Island?" he asked, destroying the silence between us.

I was completely caught off guard by the husky timbre of his voice. "Huh?"

He smiled. "Jennifer tells me that you are very good at what you do. You do work for a real estate company, don't you?"

"I do. Smith, Robinson and Bradshaw. I've been with them for five years. Our clients are an affluent circle of old money, who don't mind splurging their wealth, even on uninhabited inlets. Offers that are vastly under four million dollars are usually met with a recommendation of another brokerage, whose appetite is less sophisticated. We have a strong history of meeting our clients' expensive tastes –"

"Which means you only cater to high-end property seekers," Taj finished for me. He stared at me as if he was rolling an idea around in his head. "So, four million dollars, is it?"

I froze at the enticing way his lips moved. "Why don't you tell me your budget and I will tell you if I can work something out for you."

"Sounds as if you love doing favors."

"Well...," I paused, as I heard my toilet flush. Taj's eyes dithered with mischief at my nervousness. "That depends heavily on who the favor is for. You're Jennifer's fiancé. I will do my best to accommodate you."

"Let's us meet tomorrow for lunch." He said it as if he were in charge of me. "I would like to discuss some things with you."

Of course, I am both confused and speechless. I'd determined by the expression in his tone that he did not want Jennifer to know that he'd asked me out to lunch. What was the reason behind the secrecy? I doubted Taj had four million dollars put away to purchase property on Paradise Island. He was a chauffeur who drove around a seventy-year-old rich woman.

"I will call you at noon with the details," he said. "Jennifer thinks so highly of you, but I would love a chance at getting to know you for myself. You are very intriguing."

Intriguing? Now devil, you are nothing but a liar. I was trying to figure out what Taj meant when he brushed past me and strutted into my sunken den. I watched him as he eased down on my sofa and clicked on the flat screen TV. I was temporarily paralyzed, struggling against giving in to that brief, but electrifying contact of his skin. His scent was a crisp blend of rosewood and mint – an extremely spellbinding concoction.

Luckily for me, my doorbell came alive and forced me out of my stupor. The remainder of the girls filed in behind the others with their familiar racket. I loved their energy, but the only thing on my mind at that moment was trying to understand the real reason why Taj wanted me to have lunch with him. Because from that moment onward, an uncomfortable vibe began to stir within my spirit.
Chapter Two

The next morning I sat at my desk, glancing at my phone every ten minutes. Taj said that he would call me at noon and I couldn't focus on anything else. It amazed me that I'd spent an extra twenty minutes in the mirror trying to highlight the few little curves I had. Though I was not as fashionable or as glamorous as Jennifer, I knew how to make my clothes look presentable. The bronze Roz and Ali asymmetrical dress I'd selected, rose slightly above my knees. My legs were not all that bad, so I was not ashamed to show them off.

I chose not to wear a belt around my waist because it made me look thinner than I already was. My lengthy brown hair, which I normally kept in a messy chignon, complemented my smooth almond complexion. The front was cut short and spread evenly atop my professionally-arched brows. I made sure my makeup was done to perfection and that my feet moved comfortably in a pair of four-inch Casadei heels.

I kept telling myself that this was only a professional meeting between Taj and me and I needed not to pay any attention to that uncomfortable feeling in my stomach. It wasn't as if I was planning to do something wrong behind Jennifer's back. Taj wanted to keep this meeting a secret and I should at least see what his reasons were before my thoughts ran wild with vain imaginations.

The office of Smith, Robinson and Bradshaw had been selling and renting properties on Paradise Island for the past twenty years. A firm whose brand was well-recognized in the real estate market. For five of those years, I have been kissing butts to make partner. I'd sold beachfront villas, private villas, private islands, waterfront properties and everything else in between and my accomplishments still seemed to come up short. I scanned my name that had been embossed on a gold plate. Sierra Lloyd – Licensed Professional. I wanted my name on the building, right alongside the three men who'd started the company.

"Sierra Lloyd," I heard a male voice announce. "You haven't changed a bit since the last time I saw you."

The voice sounded familiar. I dragged my gaze from the embossed plate to a medium-built man standing in my office doorway. I was staring at a complete stranger. By the way his brows came together, my expression must have baffled him.

"Sierra, I can't believe you don't recognize me. I have only been gone for two years."

I was usually good with faces, especially a man with attractive features. So it bothered me that I was drawing a blank. But when he laughed, a laugh that was very distinct and infectious, my brain suddenly pulled me back five years to when I'd initially met Bruce Bradshaw's eighteen-year-old son. A three-hundred pound slob, who on purpose, annoyed the crap out of me.

I had recently been employed by the firm, and to my detriment, Mr. Bradshaw's son had been assigned to show me the ropes, so to speak. At the time I wondered what an eighteen-year-old could teach me about the real estate market, especially since I'd already had three years of successfully selling properties under my belt. But I had underestimated his cockiness and the knowledge of the business he'd obviously inherited from his father. I couldn't believe this attractive man, who looked to be about 175lbs of solid muscle was the son of Bruce Bradshaw.

I squinted my eyes. "Reuben?"

He opened his hands and grinned. "In the flesh...150lbs less, but it's definitely me."

My mind was doing all sorts of things at this point, trying to compare the before and after images. I couldn't do it. The transformation was too much to digest in one shot. If two years of living abroad in Beijing could have such an impact on a person's perspective, I was tempted to relocate – if even just for the experience.

"What the heck happened to you?" I asked, which felt like a really stupid question. "I mean...you've changed...dramatically."

By the half smile Reuben gave me, I knew he could tell that I was totally blown away. "I am no longer pursuing my father's dream for my life," he said. "I've found my calling."

Calling? That word was a part of the Christian vernacular, but with Reuben, that could mean anything. I held my peace and allowed my eyes to linger a little longer on his torso. I could see that he was well-cut beneath the polo shirt he wore. To say that I was amazed would be an understatement.

"I wasn't expecting that kind of response from you." He smirked. "I was hoping you would've been so excited to see me that you would jump out of your chair to hug me." He beckoned in a playful manner. "Come on, don't be shy. I know the transformation is killing you, but it's really me."

I rolled my eyes. "Well, there is at least one thing that hasn't changed about you," I told him. "And that is you're still as cocky as ever."

He laughed. "I choose to see it as confidence. It's what got me to this point in my life, but more about me later. Maybe we could spend a little time together before I..."

My phone rang and I almost knocked it over trying to answer it. I knew it was Taj and I tried to downplay my expectation so that I didn't get too giddy about meeting a man that could land me in the danger zone. It didn't work. I pulled out a notepad and scribbled the name of the restaurant where we were going to meet. Suppressing again that uncomfortable feeling in my stomach, I disconnected and explained to Reuben that I had an appointment.

Reuben suddenly piped up, "I'll come along for the ride. It'll be like old times...meeting with those eccentric spinsters who don't know what to do with their money."

I was startled by Reuben's boldness to intrude on a meeting that I considered private. If I wanted his company, didn't he think I would've asked? I stared at him, still not thoroughly convinced that this was the same Reuben who'd left to study Mandarin in Beijing two years ago. His body may have undergone a jaw-dropping transformation, but somehow, his irksome personality still remained remarkably unchanged.

I snapped at him before I could gain control of my words, "Don't you have something more pressing to do with your time? I'm sorry, but this is a private meeting."

To my surprise, he laughed at my outburst. "Sierra, I'm just so happy to see you. No worries. I will see you when you return. Please, don't let me ruin your mood."

I was sure there was a frown on my face. Before, when I would respond to Reuben in such a churlish manner, he would've given me the third degree about my attitude. I stared at him suspiciously. "Okay, out with it. Tell me what you've done with the real Reuben Bradshaw."  
He laughed again. "Like I told you...I've found my calling. Some things are not worth making a fuss over anymore."

Okay, this guy was scaring me. Maybe I was wrong about the personality thing. However, I did not have time to stay to determine if Reuben's being nice to me was simply a ruse to get under my skin. Time would tell. "Well, thank you for understanding," I mumbled.

I grabbed my handbag from the edge of my swivel chair and as I passed him in the doorway, I wrestled briefly with the idea of giving him a friendly hug. Instead, I continued out into the hall. But because I was still feeling a bit convicted over the way I'd snapped at him, I paused in my stride and faced him. "I apologize for lashing out at you. Lots of crazy stuff on my mind these days."

He pushed his hands in his pockets and smiled. "No worries. With you gone, it'll give me some time to say hello to my miserable father. Hopefully, I will convince him to call a truce."

I walked away, frowning over Reuben's behavior. It was this new, unexplained aura and the way he had been able to give his body such an incredible makeover. However, by the time I stepped into the elevator, Reuben had faded out of my system, and was replaced with a high expectation of seeing Taj Brooks.
Blessed is the man that endures temptation; for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord has promised to them that love him.

James 1:12
Chapter Three

In the luxurious coves of SandyPort, The News Café was a popular ole town breakfast and lunch spot. It offered a full delicatessen style menu, along with an ice cream parlor. The waitress came over and took my name before escorting me to a table for two. Taj stood up when he saw me approaching. He was so gorgeous that I often wondered how his parents looked – to have created such startling beauty.

I sighed inwardly as I stopped within a few feet of his stare and extended my hand for a professional shake. Simply put, it was blasphemous for a man to look the way Taj did. He gently lifted my hand to his lips and pressed the soft flesh against my skin, making my toes twist in my shoes. Lord, Jesus, if only you could bless me with a man like this!

"Sierra Lloyd, I've been meaning to have this talk with you," he began and then arrested me with those hazel eyes. "Jennifer raves about your work incessantly. I just had to bite the bullet and see for myself."

I gave Taj a cautionary glance. "Does Jennifer know we are having this meeting?"

Showing just how much of a gentleman he was, Taj walked to my side of the table and pulled out my chair. He made sure that I was properly tucked in before venturing back to his side. The waitress placed two menus in front of us, took our drink order and then left us to resume our conversation.

To my question, Taj clasped his hands on table, and said, "There's nothing that I don't share with Jennifer. Secrets somehow always return to bite you in the butt..."

I was a bit crestfallen by his response and I couldn't understand why. Maybe it was because deep down, I wanted this meeting to remain a secret between us, which then would be a serious red flag as it pertained to my real intentions. Of course, the obvious showed that I enjoyed being in Taj's presence, but did I have the courage to admit that there could be something inherently wrong with me? Oh God, how do I end this? I prayed as I focused on a sensible comeback. "Well, that is commendable. With traits like those, you will certainly make Jennifer a fine husband someday."

I looked away, but I felt his eyes piercing deep into my soul.

"Thank you. But I haven't completed what I was going to say. While it is true that I don't keep secrets from Jennifer, this meeting with you is an exception."

I turned my gaze back to him. "I don't understand."

"Well, it's rather simple. I want to surprise Jennifer with the home of her dreams. And that's where you come in. We are going to find Jennifer the perfect place on Paradise Island. No other property will do."

I should've been happy for my best friend – actually, I was excited for her, but I couldn't get past my disappointment. My expectation of the meeting was not going as I'd thought. But what did I expect from this man anyway? Roses and a box of sugary chocolates? Reality check, Sierra: Taj loves Jennifer and is going to marry her within four short months. I took a deep breath to adjust my mood. How wicked of me to even allow myself to be smitten by another woman's man. There, I finally admitted it.

I replied, "You do know that the properties I negotiate – especially on Paradise Island – start around 2.5 million dollars and up? I can refer you to someone else if that amount exceeds your budget –"

"You are referring me to someone else? You didn't say that yesterday evening."

"Well, as part of what I do, I was merely making a suggestion, or broadening your options, so to speak. As for example, you can rent for much cheaper but will still be able to enjoy the amenities that Paradise Island offers. Properties such as Lyford Cay and Westridge are other hot spots for affluent living but could be purchased at a price less intimidating."

Taj smirked. "You don't think I can afford four million dollars?"

"I did not say that, Mr. Brooks – "

"You're typecasting me because I drive a limo for a sweet, seventy-year-old woman. Please, call me Taj. Mr. Brooks is too formal."

"Well," I said, wanting to cut to the chase, "do you have four million dollars?"

"Why are you upset?"

"I am not upset..." I paused to lower the tone of my voice. "I simply tell my clients how it is. You moved here from Florida three months ago and you are probably not aware that properties on Paradise Island are highly sought after. I wouldn't want to waste your time... or mine, for that matter."

Taj was right. I was upset, but I couldn't really say why. Maybe I had been too judgmental. However, it was part of my job to ensure buyers were not in over their heads. How much did a limo driver make? Five hundred to a thousand dollars a week? Hardly enough to rent a two-bedroom condo on Paradise Island.

"I'm no stranger to the Bahamas," Taj said. "How much I can afford is my decision, isn't it? I would like for you to show me some listings that are available on Paradise Island. Nothing more; nothing less."

I stared into that handsome face sitting across the table from me. The eyes, the nose, the jawline were in perfect symmetry with each other. Why was I so taken by this man? Maybe it was his relaxed composure, being able to handle my craziness without getting all bent out of shape about it. I respected a man who was not moved by my candor.

When the waitress returned with a pad to write what we were having from the menu, I explained to her that I would take my order to go. My excuse was that I had a mountain of things to do. Taj kept his gaze locked on me while I spoke to the waitress.

"Are you meeting with another client?" he questioned when we were alone again.

"As a matter of fact, I am," I lied and asked the Lord to forgive me within the same breath. I pushed away from the table and stood to my feet. "I will call you in a few days to let you know what is available. Keep in mind, Mr. Brooks...er, Taj, that buying real estate on Paradise Island is very costly – and not just in terms of simply purchasing it, but maintaining it."

Taj stood as well, showing me that dimpled smile. "Thank you, Sierra. I know you will do your best to make Jennifer happy."

There he goes again, throwing my friendship with Jennifer in my face. He knew I would do anything for Jennifer. However, showing him around the available properties meant that we would be spending a lot of time together. Should I follow through with referring Taj to another broker and save myself from being tempted to commit the unpardonable? Because I didn't see any good coming out of us spending more time together.

But a small part of me desired to be in Taj's presence, looking at his perfect face and imagining it was me that he was getting married to. But that desire was usually shrouded in the voice of my conscience, which persisted I should cut my losses and wait for God to bless me with my own husband.
Chapter Four

That evening, I told Jennifer to meet me at Starbucks to discuss the plans for her wedding, but truthfully, I wanted a little more background information on Taj Brooks. I had already ordered Jennifer's favorite: a vanilla Frappuccino. She dragged a chair next to me and sat with her elbows on the table. I studied the engagement ring she was wearing, which was about one and a half-carats in size. Did Taj buy that with his own money? It would certainly give me some assurance that he was really not wasting my time.

"I got here as soon as I could," my friend complained. "What is so important that it couldn't be said over the phone? Battling this traffic on the bridge at this hour is road rage material. Next time, be considerate and come to the mainland."

I tilted my head and smiled. "Your wedding is about four months away, and you're not a very excited bride-to-be. Do you even know what you want for decorations and favors? Because it's one of the many items we have yet to discuss on your wedding list."

Jennifer tossed a few blonde strands behind an ear, and said, "I'm getting married in an aquarium surrounded by hundreds of fish. Why would I need decorations and favors? But you and the girls seem to think it's important, so handle it. I am too busy trying to keep Taj happy."

I huffed, "I don't understand you sometimes. If this wedding is not that important to you, why are you even marrying Taj? And please don't go bragging about how wild and crazy the sex is. It seems as if Taj has knocked out your senses. Do you even still consider yourself a Christian?"

Jennifer threw her head back and laughed. "Sierra, I can depend on you to keep me on the straight and narrow. But the sex is really good...."

"Oh please, spare me the details," I spat at her.

"Come on, Sierra, I've been thinking about this a whole lot. Why should I marry Taj when things are going so well between us?"

"Do you even have to ask that when the bible clearly says to abstain from fornication and every other sexual sin? You make me feel as if you had only repeated the 'sinner's prayer' to get me off of your back."

"Don't preach to me, Sierra."

"Someone has got to tell you the truth."

"Well, it ain't always gotta come from you. Give me break, for crying out loud." Jennifer then lowered her voice, and said with a mischievous grin attached to her face, "You know, Taj and I try a new position every night. This morning, we were in my kitchen –"

I put up my hand in protest. "Oh heavens, Jennifer, you are intentionally being presumptuous! I don't care to hear about your ungodly bedroom antics!"

"Sierra, you need a man to teach you the ropes. Because it's the only way you will lose that miserable streak of yours. How long has it been anyway?"

"How long what?"

"Come on, sweets. Don't play stupid. You never share anything about your sex life."

"I did not invite you here to pry into my sex life." I then quickly navigated the conversation toward the direction I'd intended. Jennifer was my best friend, but I would never reveal to her that I was almost thirty but was still untouched by any man. Especially because I knew she would only make a mockery out of it. "How well do you know Taj anyway?"

Jennifer stared at me. "What do you mean?"

"Now who's playing stupid?" I snapped. "You met Taj on Facebook, which I don't have too much of a problem with because people use social networks to find love all the time. But that is where you should have drawn the line. But within a month of meeting Taj, you showed up on my doorstep already engaged to him. He then migrates from Florida and moves in with you."

"And your point is?"

"Don't be flippant with me, Jennifer. You know that I care about you very much and I would hate to see you get hurt."

"Do you know that Taj has family living in the Bahamas? He doesn't need to move in with me to stay here. Besides, I know all I need to know about the man I'm about to marry."

Taj did mention that he was no stranger to the Bahamas, but Jennifer was missing my point. And I told her as much. I decided to go down my list of questions I'd mentally prepared while on my way to Starbucks. "Okay, if you know your man so well, can you at least tell me what you know about his job?"

"You know what he does," Jennifer replied, and then narrowed her eyes at me. "Why do you need me to tell you –"

"Because some things are not adding up! Does he even have a work permit to be employed as a limo driver?"

"What's with all the questions about Taj? I'm marrying him – not you. So back the hell off!"

And I did – but only for the moment. Jennifer's cheeks were flushed with anger as she picked up the vanilla Frappuccino to take a sip. Her hands shook, a side of Jennifer I rarely saw.

"Are you okay?" I questioned in a calmer tone.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know..." I paused and tried to reestablish some measure of peace between us. "I am sorry, Jennifer, for making you upset. It's just that I'm really concerned about you. Taj seems to be a good man, but we need to be sure who we are hooking up with."

Jennifer looked at me and smiled, one that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Do you find Taj attractive?"

Whoa, I didn't expect that. Had Jennifer picked up on something during my assault on Taj's character? Do I dare say I am attracted to Taj? And even if it could be termed as an attraction or more accurately, my burgeoning lust, I assumed I'd been careful enough not to show any of it while being in their presence. Oh God, what do I tell Jennifer? It's not like I've been plotting behind her back to steal her man. I'd had one meeting with him, which had been Taj's idea anyway. He wants to surprise Jennifer with a house. There's nothing wrong with keeping that a secret, was it?

"It's just a simple question," Jennifer prompted me. "Maybe I should reword what I'm trying to get at. "Do you fantasize about having sex with Taj? He's every woman's dream. So please, don't give me no theological crap about your Christian principles and how you are trying to stay pure. Just tell the truth."

I placed a hand to my chest and with every indignant bone in me, I spat, "Why would you even ask me a question like that? Of course Taj is a good-looking man, but despite what you think of my principles – Christian or not – he's not every woman's dream. I, for one, would not waste my time pining for a man that didn't belong to me. I have too much dignity for that."

Jennifer continued to stare at me and I could see she was not entirely convinced. "Good, because I know you would never hurt me like that. I asked Kimone and Maya the same question and they admitted that they did fantasize about Taj. I don't know if I should classify them as backstabbers or simply see them as being brutally honest. But I don't trust Maya at all. She's bold in showing her lust for my man." Pushing to her feet, Jennifer grabbed one of the bridal magazines that I'd rested in front of me. "I better be going before the traffic worsens. I'll flip through the magazine, and then I'll give you a call if I come across something I like."

And just like that, my best friend whisked through the exit. I tried to collect my composure but my conscience was strangling the heck out of me. I hated being dishonest. But how could I confess to Jennifer that I'd been having dirty thoughts about her fiancé? That was just between me and God. I sighed and shook my head at such a close call. Even now, I was more inclined to maintain a professional relationship with Taj. I didn't want to lose my best friend over a man, but more importantly my connection with God.

I stood up to leave, venturing outside toward my late-model Mercedes.
Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content.

Helen Keller
Chapter Five

I arrived to work half an hour before my usual time Monday morning. My mind was well-rested and ready to tackle that day's tasks. My plan was to go through my listings and identify those properties I felt were right for Taj and Jennifer. Once I'd made it into the grand marble foyer, I greeted Esther, our secretary, and then proceeded toward the elevator.

I'd requested to study in France for six months while working in one of the offices over there, but it was not easy to secure an approval. I was up against fierce competition amidst ten other career-driven moguls. My boss, Bruce Bradshaw, presently held the record for selling the largest beachfront property at a cool twenty-four million dollars. My goal was to surpass that.

I stepped out of the elevator and noticed Reuben sitting on the floor with his back against a wall and a pair of earplugs stuffed in his ears. His eyes were closed, which gave me some time to study his muscular physique: a surfer-type body that exuded youth, casually clad in shorts and a tank top. His skin was smooth all over. A beaded chain connected beautifully around his neck, which matched the beaded bracelet that was around his left ankle. I reminded myself that Reuben was five years younger than I was and that I didn't feel an ounce of chemistry between us.

When I tapped him on the shoulder, he jumped out of whatever he was listening to and flashed me a broad smile. He removed the earplugs.

"Why are you sitting on the floor outside my office?"

He shrugged. "My father gave my office space away to someone else. And he doesn't want me lounging around in his office. Your office is the safest place for me to be at the moment."

After that humbling episode with Jennifer, I was not in the mood to be mean to anyone. I opened my office door and invited him in.

"Just so that you know," he said as he followed me in, "I don't plan on being in your hair all day. You are a workaholic and I will not get in the way of that."

"That's very considerate of you, Reuben," I replied. "But what are you going to be doing in the meantime while I spend hours staring at my laptop and drawing up my contracts?"

"This..." He showed me his earplugs and the iPad that it was attached to. "I have an interview with a gym owner this afternoon. I'm just going over some information I know I'm going to be asked."

I eased my butt in the swivel chair and gave Reuben a questioning stare. Several things I was confused about.

"Question number one," I said to him. "Why are you meeting with a gym owner when your father paid for you to study Mandarin, which he obviously did to enhance your realty skills?"

He grinned. "Do you want the short version?"

"It seems as if you are enjoying this."

Reuben rubbed his right brow. I could see that he was trying hard not to smirk. "You remember what I told you yesterday," he reminded me, "about finding my calling? Well, I've been doing missionary work for the last eighteen months."

I laughed.

"Why did you laugh?" Reuben asked.

"Because the Reuben I know made fun of those sort of those things. What are you telling me? That you are a Christian now?"

"I am. You should be proud to know that your little sermonettes weren't preached in vain."

I eyeballed Reuben, waiting for him to tell me that he was kidding. But he just smiled and dove right into the details of his stay overseas.

"When I initially arrived at the Beijing office," he started, "I was excited about the opportunities my father had dropped in my lap – so to speak. I went to work in the mornings, and during the late afternoons, I sat with my Mandarin instructor. After about three months, I walked by an abandoned building and saw a group of young men who seemed to be rehearsing for some theatrical performance. By this time, I could make out quite a few words in Mandarin and became curious about what was being said by the leader of the group."

"So one afternoon, I built up the courage to go and inquire of it. I discovered that the young men were preparing to face prosecution. Two of their Christian friends had been placed on house arrest and they were planning to take food and water to them. But the Beijing police were cruel and would arrest and punish any Christian attempting to do so."

"So what does the theatrical performance have to do with anything?" I asked.

"Well, those young men were building their faith by mimicking the cruelty of Beijing Police. They knew they would eventually be arrested and mistreated. By practicing to stand under pressure, they became unbelievably valiant. I was blown away. Not because I suddenly realized how fortunate Christians are in the western hemisphere, but because of the ages of those young men, which ranged somewhere between 12 and 17."

"What a show of bravado I could only assume came from their faith in God. My appetite for that sort of demonstration had been aroused and I wanted more. Of course, I didn't accompany them on that particular mission, but I found out where their church was located and joined it. I then immersed myself into their 'feeding the poor' program while I developed my bible IQ. And as they say, the rest is history."

I wanted to begin my work, but Reuben's story had me reeling in wonderment. But could I trust him to tell me the truth? Working with Reuben in the past only reminded me of how arrogant and pretentious he'd been.

"So basically, you ditched a promising career in real estate to learn how to support a food drive? I'm not striking you down for it. As a matter of fact I think it's commendable, even more so now that you profess to be a Christian, but you have to understand why your father is furious with you. Because you, Mr. Reuben Bradshaw are next in line to take over for your father."

Reuben seemed to take my words with a grain of salt. He opened his hands, and said, "It's kind of hard to explain. Yes, I went against my father's wishes, but I had to find myself and what God has called me to do. And part of that was focusing on my health and making my body as fit as I could, in order to do the work the Lord has assigned me to do."

"I eventually abandoned the real estate office and enrolled fulltime into a health and nutrition program. I started going to the gym and I began to enjoy learning about it. I was 150lbs overweight and I realized while preparing meals to distribute to the poor that I was being excessive and extravagant, even down to the way I ate. It won't matter if a person spends four million dollars on a house if they're only going to suffer a heart attack or die from a poor-diet-related disease before they're fifty years old."

I waved Reuben's philosophy aside with a little of my own, because I felt as if Reuben was condemning my affluent lifestyle. "What you are talking about only happens in certain cases. Everyone who is rich is not going to die of some disease. In fact, I know of dozens of rich old folk, who swear by fried chicken as one of their main foods."

Reuben raised a brow at me. "Dozens of old folk? I would like to meet some of them. They are probably on their way to their grave and don't even know it. Imagine how many years they've been clogging their arteries."

I wanted to win this argument, so I cut my eyes at Reuben in a way to indicate I was ready for the conversation to end. "What are you now? A health consultant wannabe?"

He smiled. "And what is so wrong with that? Imagine when I open my own chain of companies."

Not able to come up with a sensible comeback, I watched as Reuben put the earplugs back into his ears and stared at his iPad as if it held all the answers to life. Too filled with pride to let Reuben see his actions had bothered me, I turned my attention to my laptop and buried myself in my work. About an hour later, he mumbled something before he quietly slipped out of my office. I was happy to finally be rid of him anyway.
Chapter Six

Four hours later, I was in my Mercedes, heading for something to eat. I'd found three properties that I thought Taj would appreciate. My favorite was a two-bedroom condo with a private pool and a maid's cottage. But clients' tastes were so unpredictable, I was inclined to believe that Taj would probably go for something completely different. It wouldn't bother me in the least if he did. I was more concerned about whether or not he could afford it.

The August heat was intolerable. Even with my air conditioning on full blast, I could feel the warmth of the sun shining through the windshield onto my almond skin. I was trying to focus on a Christian fiction audio book I'd pushed into the CD player, but my thoughts kept ruminating over the conversation I'd had with Jennifer on Saturday. I couldn't get over how bold she'd been to have inquired of such a personal matter. I was itching to find out what Kimone and Maya thought about it. I reached for my BlackBerry and punched in Kimone's number.

"How are you doing, Kimone?"

"Not well at all." She sniffed into the phone. "I can't find my little pumpkins."

I rolled my eyes. "I can't believe you're still looking for those disgusting rats."

"Hamsters are not rats!"

"To me they are. Besides, they shouldn't cost more than fifteen dollars at the pet store. Go buy a new one."

I pulled the phone away from my ear because I knew Kimone would explode at my suggestion. She didn't know how to handle practical advice. After counting to five, I placed the cell back to my ear. She was still screaming.

"I'd had Fergie for eight months; I don't want a new hamster! What the hell is wrong with you suggesting something crazy like that?"

"Kimone, calm down, honey," I tried to soothe. "I'm sorry that you can't find Fergie, but I'm calling because I need to ask you something."

Kimone suddenly grew quiet as if expecting to hear the juiciest gossip. "Is the question about me?"

"No...it's about Jennifer."

"Well, then," Kimone perked up. "Ask away! Jennifer and Taj are our favorite subjects these days."

I was bothered by Kimone's excitement. It was obvious she wanted to hear something negative about Jennifer, but I wasn't in the mood to entertain it.

"Did Jennifer ever ask if you were having fantasies about Taj?"

"I wish she would."

"Kimone, don't start..."

"What? You know that man is just too fine to be tied down with that white broad."

"I've told you and Maya not to let Taj come between our friendship."

"Be real with me, girl. Don't you wish that man was yours? He's fine as hell!"

He is, but I'm no fool to divulge my innermost secrets to anyone, especially about a man all of us seem to tripping over. My aim is to keep the Word of God in the forefront, even if it finds me guilty. "Remember what the scripture says about the lust of the eyes...coveting those things that have a visual appeal..."

"...which the devil uses as one avenue of temptation," Kimone finished for me. "I've heard you say it a hundred times...ooh girl, I wish you would learn to have a little fun sometimes."

"Lusting is your idea of fun?" I sniggered. "Nothing is fun about that for the child of God. It is strictly prohibited."

Kimone moaned. "I hear you, girl. I was only feeding off of Maya's comments about Taj's poor choice in women. She is the one we should be concerned about because she seemed to have a plan to swipe Taj away from Jennifer."

"Oh my God. I hope she is kidding about that."

"With Maya, you never know if she is kidding or not. But don't worry about Maya; she'll come around. Why'd you ask me that question anyway?"

"I simply wanted to know what you and Maya thought about it," I explained. "Jennifer told me she asked both you and Maya the same question and that both of you admitted to having fantasies of Taj."

Kimone let out a little chuckle. "Somebody's been smoking something and I know it wasn't me."

"Please be serious."

"Of course I'm being serious, Sierra. Jennifer has never approached me with a question like that before."

I pouted my lips in confusion. "Well, it doesn't seem like Jennifer to be so..."

"Insecure?" Kimone offered. "That she would lie through her teeth?"

I wanted to accept that as a possible explanation as to why my best friend would be dishonest with me, but Jennifer was one of the most self-assured persons I knew. "You really think Jennifer is insecure?"

"It makes sense, doesn't it? But if she had asked me that question, I probably wouldn't have told her the truth anyway. But Jennifer is your friend and I can understand why you are so worried. With a man as fine as Taj, what woman wouldn't be insecure?"

I hung up from Kimone feeling worse than I did ten minutes ago. Jennifer and I had always been upfront with each other, so I couldn't understand why she would lie to me like that. But I pulled back on my anger because it wasn't like I'd been totally upfront with her either. I dialed Maya's home number anyway to settle my mind over the issue. If Maya said that Jennifer had asked her that question about Taj, then I'd know for sure that there was a level of mistrust lurking somewhere in our friendship. However, I wasn't getting through to Maya. I became increasingly frustrated because I hadn't any idea how a person who was out of a job could be so busy.

By this time, my stomach was growling loudly, which reminded me about why I had been driving in the first place. I had an overwhelming desire to get a salad from Wendys. Since I was already in the vicinity, I pulled my Mercedes to the right and joined the line toward the Wendy's drive-thru. While I was waiting to order, I decided to give Taj a buzz to let him know that I'd found three properties I thought he would like. Even though he was the hot topic of interest, he was also a client that I needed to treat as such.

"Hello?" His husky voice filled my ear and I almost forgot what I called him for.

"Mr. Brooks...er, Taj," I stammered, but I quickly jumped into my professional tone. "I'm calling to let you know that I've found some properties. Can we meet at my office tomorrow at ten in the morning? Since the properties are located on Paradise Island, we should be able to view them all within a reasonable time."

"What are you doing now? It's only one thirty in the afternoon."

"Well, I'm about to have lunch."

"What are you doing afterwards? I would like to meet with you, if I can."

Taj's voice was making my head swim, but my professional tone somehow remained intact. "I did not plan to fit you into my schedule today," I explained.

"Don't make me beg, Sierra. I want to see you."

The way Taj dragged my name completely discombobulated my mind and it was enough for me to fall prey to his demand. I swallowed the lump that had wedged in my throat, and replied, "Well, I should be back in my office in an hour. Let me give you the directions."

"Thanks, but I don't need them. I know how to find you."

Taj disconnected, but I was still holding the phone against my ear. I had been going from wrestling with a guilty conscience in one spell to suddenly having a profane desire to see Taj in another. The feelings caused butterflies to start flapping around in my stomach, and suddenly, my hunger was satiated. Oh Jesus, why it is so hard for me to take heed to my own sermons?
Chapter Seven

Shortly after two in the afternoon, I walked into the foyer of Smith, Robinson and Bradshaw. I estimated having at least twenty minutes to freshen up before Taj arrived. As I passed the kiosk, Esther stopped me with a devilish look to her eyes.

"Reuben left a message for you," she said, and then handed me a note with her handwriting on it. "He says to call him as soon as you read it."

"Oh really?" I couldn't help being sarcastic when it came to Reuben. Maybe it was his clinginess that brought out the worst in me, but I cared not to be bothered with him. "What else did he tell you?"

Esther gave me a smile I found to be very suspicious. "Can I confide in you about something?" she asked.

"It's your choice, Esther, but you have my word I'm never a blabbermouth."

She leaned over her desk as one intending to share a secret. "Reuben has turned out to be one sexy man, hasn't he? Do you remember how depressed he was about his weight before he left for Beijing?"

I worked along with Reuben for three years before he'd migrated overseas, but I'd never once noticed that he'd been depressed about his weight. I'd always seen him as the slob who didn't care one iota what people thought about him, including his father. Now, I'm feeling a slight pain in my chest for the way I may have wrongly perceived him. But how do I respond to Esther? It was clear she was crazy over the boss' son.

"I didn't know Reuben had been depressed about his weight," I replied, "But I am certainly impressed with his transformation. Now, he has a beach body he can show off to all of the women."

Esther's smile gradually morphed into a confused look. "You worked with him for three years, you should know that Reuben isn't like that. He's always been a one-woman man."

I had nothing to say. It seemed those who had the least bit of contact with Reuben, knew him better than I did. Maybe I should have felt embarrassed by that thought, but I was too caught up on Taj arriving at any minute. I casually pushed Reuben's note into my pocket and proceeded toward the elevator.

****

Before continuing to my office, I made a quick stop to the restroom to brush my teeth. Hopefully I would have sufficient time to fix my makeup. The navy pants suit I was wearing was presentable and not too revealing. With Taj insisting on seeing me today, I didn't need to be worried over whether or not I was showing too much skin. I was determined to respect my best friend and keep things professional between me and Mr. Brooks.

I stepped out of the bathroom and the hairs on my back stood at attention when I heard the elevator doors ping open. I was about four feet away, waiting to see if it was him. The first thing I noticed was his shoes. An expensive-looking leather, which appeared to be too formal for this time of day. My gaze slowly traveled upward, getting a complete view of the handsome package. He was wearing black slacks with a crisp white shirt that was opened at the chest. He flashed me that dimpled smile, and all of a sudden, I was scrambling to find my tongue. This man was too good to be true.

"Sierra, how nice of you to greet your clients at the elevator," he said.

"Well, I'm just getting in as well and was on my way to the office."

He simply smirked and handed me a bottle of apple cider. "I bought it for Jennifer, but you know she fancies alcohol. I thought we could have a little toast after you've shown me the properties."

I was constantly amazed by Taj's audacity, even more amazed that he'd been paying attention to what I drink from what I didn't drink. "I don't toast while I'm working," I explained to him.

"Neither do I, but I have the rest of the day off and I'm planning not to waste it."

Two associates walked out of the office that was adjacent to the elevators. They stopped their lively chatter long enough to greet us before walking past us. I didn't know how to respond to Taj's show of confidence. Before my thoughts got into trouble, I walked off and beckoned Taj to follow me to my office.

Once in my office, I walked to my desk and grabbed a folder that contained pertinent information about the properties I selected to show Taj. I reached for my laptop bag and began to secure the items in my hand. In the process of me doing all of this, my office door snapped shut, but I didn't pay it too much attention.

"Sierra, I have a confession to make."

My head bobbed up at the sensual slur I detected in Taj's voice. But the way I'd been second guessing Taj's intentions, I was not sure if I'd interpreted him correctly. He walked toward me, a sense of purpose in his strides. He stopped in front of me and undressed me with those hazel eyes. I suddenly felt exposed by the raw desire he wasn't ashamed to show.

"But first, let me see the properties you have selected," he said. "I want to get this out of the way as soon as possible. My wedding date is swiftly approaching."

I stammered some incoherent mess before I tossed my laptop bag around my shoulder. We walked toward the elevator in silence, but the tension in the air was suffocating. I knew if Taj touched me in any way at that moment I would embrace it without protest. We were joined by four other persons in the elevator. To make room, Taj slipped in behind me and subtly wedged his body against mine – a move I knew was intentional. A small voice persisted in my head, pleading with me to run for my life, but I just stood there, frozen and burning amidst the flames of my lust.

We stepped out of the elevator and continued through the foyer in silence. The tension at this point was insane. I barely noticed Esther trying to get my attention. She said that Reuben had just walked into the building, but had slipped into the restroom for a minute. She further explained that he was on his way up to see me. I thanked her and continued toward the exit. She ran out from behind her desk, trying to block me. I ignored her. My body was on fire and Esther wouldn't have the slightest clue how to help me cool it down.

"Let me have the pleasure of chauffeuring you," Taj suggested. "It's not necessary that we drive two separate vehicles."

By his lecherous gazes, I knew Taj had something filthy on his mind. If ever I doubted what Taj's intentions were after today, it would be a crying shame to common sense. "Well, that's very kind of you, but I am not planning to return to the office," I explained to him. "I think it's best that we travel separately."

He smirked. "I promise you will enjoy the ride."

"I'm sure I would...I mean...maybe another time. I have a lot of work to do this evening."

"You're trying to be a good girl and I completely understand. But let's see how long that lasts."

My heart pounded in my chest as I watched Taj strut toward the limo. His arrogance was on display like the feathers on a peacock, but for me, it was a frightening scene. I was seriously reconsidering transferring this tour to another agent, because I could feel my lust consuming every rational thought. I couldn't believe a man like Taj was showing such a high level of interest in getting to know me.

Thankfully the properties were not too far from each other. We could complete the tour within an hour and I would be on my merry way. The first property I showed Taj was a ten-minute drive to the west side of Paradise Island. Several new homes were being constructed in the area. However, there was one recently finished that was on the market for a very reasonable price.

I stepped through the grand entryway with Taj trailing closely behind. The ten-minute drive had caused a slight drop in my body temperature. But I was acutely aware of how severely Taj's presence was still affecting me. I was afraid to even open my mouth for fear of saying something stupid. All I wanted to do was to get done with touring the properties and head home to channel this deviant behavior toward a full hour of deep repentance.

"The entry is warm and inviting," Taj said. "A lot like I imagine you would be."

I turned to face him, too shocked to ask what he meant by that. Actually, I knew what he meant, but I was just not believing it.

He gazed at me with a lopsided grin. "How big is this house?" he asked.

"A little over four thousand square feet," I managed. I thought it was best to keep walking so that I could keep a little distance between me and Taj. "There are five bedrooms and three baths. As you can see it is a recently-built home."

For staging purposes, the house was fully furnished to give clients an idea of how everything would come together.

We walked deeper into the foyer and were greeted by a sprawling staircase, surrounded by an open space extending twenty feet into the air. I usually showed my clients the bedrooms before any other room in a house this size; however, the thought of me and Taj getting next to a bed was too tempting. I led him to the gourmet kitchen and then walked outside through a pair of French doors, leading to the maid's cottage.

"You can use this as a space for your guests," I explained. "That is, if you're not the type who is into the maid thing."

Taj came up behind me and rested his hand right above my hips, which caused me to flinch. "I can tell that I make you nervous," he said. "You need to relax and enjoy the moment. I love the home, by the way, but it's far too big for me and Jennifer."

"I have two more properties to show you, which are about half the size of this home."

"I can't wait for you to show them to me."

I froze when his hand traveled to my shoulder, pushing beneath the soft fabric to play with the straps of my brassiere. His gentle massages were slow and calculating. I exhaled when he lowered his lips and blew his breath against my neck.

"When you play with fire," he whispered, "you will get burned."

His hot breath smelled like a mixture of alcohol and mints. Each time he found another spot on my neck, my breathing quickened. I'd totally forgotten that I was at work and that we could be caught in the maid's cottage by one of the property attendants. I could lose my job and if I didn't stop Taj, I could end up losing my virginity.

"What are you doing? Don't you know how wrong – "

He silenced me with a hard kiss, but I pushed him away. He pulled me back into him and forced his tongue deep into my mouth. I pushed him away a second time.

"Stop it!" I hissed at him. "I don't want to do this."

Taj's Adam's apple bulged as if my resistance had heightened his desire. He just stared at me through his sex-crazed eyes, causing every fiber in my body to relive another wave of intensity. "I can tell that you want to have sex," he said. "Why you're not giving in remains a mystery to me. I am not through with you yet..."

I backed away and bolted for the exit. My heart was pounding mightily against my chest as I managed to climb into my Mercedes without crumbling to the floor. I put the shift in reverse and rocketed down the driveway. Soon, the pounding had travelled to my head and the only thing I could focus on was a repetitive prayer: Lord, forgive me, Lord, forgive me, Lord, forgive me...
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

1 Corinthians 10:13
Chapter Eight

That evening when I got home, I dropped my keys and handbag on the coffee table and dragged myself to the bathroom to take a cold shower. Waves of disbelief lingered in my thoughts as I constantly took in deep breaths to regain my equilibrium. Should I make Taj out to be the bad guy for the way he'd forced his tongue into my mouth? I don't know, because part of me desperately wanted to give in to his advances. And although I'd briefly entertained the idea of calling Jennifer to tell her about the incident, I backed out, because I knew in my heart that would make me a hypocrite. Had I listened to that still, small voice in my head by referring Taj to another real estate agent, he and I wouldn't have had any time to be alone in the first instance.

A heavy layer of conviction was upon me and no matter how much I asked God to forgive me, I couldn't shake it. Maybe it was because an image of Taj hungrily attacking my lips had etched itself deep within my brain, rewinding over and over again like a galling scratched record. I felt unworthy and out of sync with the moral standards I'd set for myself. That was one of the reasons why I shied away from discussions that focused too much on sex because the only thing those discussions did was awaken the prurient desires of the flesh.

I took off my clothes and examined my almond skin in the mirror. It was flushed and I could only assume it was because of the adrenaline that had been pumping through my veins. I then closed my eyes, wanting to continue my mournful discourse with God. This was an extremely difficult battle for me because there was a real attraction to Taj, hidden beneath all of my efforts to do the right thing. I knew I did not possess the strength to resist that man. Oh dear God, what do I do in a situation like this?

I was about to proceed to the bathroom when I saw a headline flash across my small flat screen TV. Usually, I kept my TV stations locked on TBN or some other gospel station to help maintain a godly atmosphere. But as I studied the headline, which succinctly read, Bishop Errol Jackson's Testimony, I became immediately interested when the bishop began speaking about his fall from grace.

"I was invited to preach for a week-long revival in Bliss Haven," he began, "and having made it to the end of the revival, I was physically and emotionally drained. I was resting in the office of the pastor who'd invited me to preach, when I noticed the door to the office rattle open. And to make a long story short, in walked a beautiful young girl who was sixteen years old at the time. I was asked by this pastor to sit and counsel the young girl, who obviously looked as if she had a whole lot going on in her life. Against my better judgment, I eventually agreed to counsel her – just me and her in the privacy of the office. That was my first mistake."

"I'd always prided myself on being one of the few good preachers whose reputation had remained intact. So, even though I was physically tired and there were no other witnesses in the office, I figured that I had the spiritual strength to proceed. That assumption was my second mistake. And my third was the deadliest of them all, which was to allow my eyes to linger on that striking creature standing in front of me. Before I move on, I would like to share a side note. God gives us signs or ways of escape to overcome our temptations – no matter the severity of that moment. But often times, we ignore these signs and gradually follow the dictates of our flesh."

"In a nutshell, 1 Corinthians 10:13 lets us know that carnal desires gain momentum by indulgence. Therefore, we should be vigilant to cut these desires at the root the moment they arise. We will not fall prey to temptation if we cleave to God and to what His word says. I knew this in theory, but when I was faced with the ultimate trial of life, I failed miserably. And here I am, after one year of being restored, showing others from experience how to avoid the unsuspecting traps of the devil. And I dare not say that the devil made me do it. I was driven away by my own lust..."

After an additional fifteen minutes of focusing on the bishop's testimony, the camera switched to the emcee who was hosting one of TBN's live specials. He stared in the camera with a reverent expression and said, "If you would like to find out more about Bishop Jackson's testimony, you can purchase a copy of his book, Don't Blame the Devil by calling the number at the bottom of your screen. Or you can go to his website at www.BisErrolJackson.org. He will be hosting a three-night crusade at the Hilton Hotel, giving a detailed exegesis on 1John 2:16. You can also tune in to TBN between the hours of 8:00 and 10:00 Friday evening, as Bishop Jackson will be streaming live into your homes..."

I quickly reached for a pen and scribbled the information on a book I had resting on my nightstand. The only other thing I could have done at that point was to look up to heaven and thank God for sending the exact message I needed to hear.

****

The next morning I woke up late for work. I rushed to the kitchen and turned on the coffee maker. While going back to my bedroom, I noticed a red light blinking on my answering machine. If it was blinking last evening when I got home, I must've been too out of it to notice. I pressed the playback function and listened as Reuben's voice filled the room.

" _Sierra, did you get my message? Why are you avoiding me? Please pick up the phone. I have some great news to share with you...Sierra?"_

Beep.

I ran back to my bedroom to look for the note, which I eventually found in the pocket of the pants I wore yesterday. It was a rather simple note that read: I got the job at the gym, but you won't believe what happened next. Call me as soon as you can. I balled up the note and tossed it onto the floor. Reuben had been running me down to tell me that he'd been hired by some stupid gym? This was just like Reuben to be so...

I paused and tried to calm down. No use working myself into a frenzy over a twenty-three-year-old boy, who was obviously having a hard time trying to find himself. I went back to the kitchen to check on my coffee. I fixed me a cup and then hastened to get dressed for work. As I was about to walk through my front door, Maya called me on my cell. She claimed that she'd just noticed my missed call.

"For a woman who doesn't work," I snapped at her, "you sure are one hard chick to catch up with."

"Just because I don't have a job doesn't mean my life is on standstill. I have stuff to do."

"Like what?"

"First of all, I'm still actively looking for a job, which takes up a lot of my time when I have to drive to other sides of town to drop off my résumés. Second, unlike you and Kimone, I'm going on dates, trying to find me a man. Jennifer's not the only one who should be allowed to snag a hunk like Taj."

I didn't want to get into whether or not Kimone had been telling the truth when she said that Maya had a plan to steal Taj from Jennifer. I didn't even want to bring up the reason why I'd been trying to reach her. Moving forward, I thought it was best to lessen my focus on Taj and focus more on building my dependence on God's word.

"I'm rushing to my office," I told Maya. "So I don't have time to talk."

"But you called me," Maya spat and continued to rant in her Asian dialect. "Kimone told me that Jennifer is starting to feel insecure about her man. She has every right to be, especially when I'm in Taj's presence. Jennifer knows she is no match for me when it comes down to giving men the royal treatment."

I rolled my eyes. That Kimone couldn't resist gossiping if her life depended on it. "Taj and Jennifer are none of your business, so stay out of it."

Maya huffed. "I can't believe Jennifer thinks you're having sexual dreams about Taj, which is odd, because you are the only person I know who is more saintly than Mother Teresa."

"Forget it, Maya. I really have to go now."

"Sierra, wait—"

I disconnected the line and walked out through my front door with my emotions still suffering from the vestiges of last night's episode. I didn't need Maya's negativity adding to it.
Chapter Nine

When I finally made it to the fourth floor of my office, Reuben was sitting on the carpet like he was the day before. The only difference was that he didn't have those silly earplugs wedged in his ears. But he did have a look of excitement on his face and I figured it had something to do with the job he'd recently landed at the gym. However, I was not interested in dealing with Reuben and his mixed up priorities. I greeted him half-heartedly and then proceeded into my office. As I had suspected, he jumped to his feet and fell in line behind my strides.

"Sierra, did you get any of my messages?"

I rested my laptop, along with my handbag, on the desk. I then walked to my swivel chair and sat in it, sighing like the entire world was on my shoulders. "Of course I got your messages, Reuben. I got them all. I can't believe you're running me down just to tell me that you've landed a job with some stupid gym."

It seemed as if my words knocked the proverbial wind out of Reuben's sails. He took a seat on my sofa and then looked at me with a dozen questions in his eyes. "Why do you perceive that my only mission in life is to hound you and to make you miserable? Have you ever considered the reason why I want to be around you so much is because I care a great deal about you and I want nothing but the best for you and your career?"

I stared at Reuben, not knowing how to respond. For the five years I'd known him, I'd never been audibly direct with my feelings toward him. I'd always given him the cold shoulder or the irritated eye, or said words that would pierce him. But I'd only done it because I felt as if Reuben was a nuisance to me. Our personalities just didn't mesh well together. Now, here he was confessing something I wasn't prepared to deal with.

"Well, I'm sorry if I made you feel that way," I finally told him. "It's just that I have a lot on my mind and so many things to do that sometimes I can't see the forest for the trees."

"Why didn't you wait for me yesterday at the kiosk?" he queried. "Esther told me she tried to stop you, but you were in such a mad rush against time that you totally ignored her."

"Did Esther tell you that I had a client waiting?" I snapped. "I had three properties lined up to show him."

"You're not talking about Taj Brooks, are you? The minute Esther described him to me, I knew who he was."

My eyes widened with shock. I'd made a vow to keep my focus away from Taj, but I couldn't resist the bait that Reuben had unsuspectingly thrown into my path. "How do you know Taj...er, Mr. Brooks?" I stammered.

"Does it matter? You're not interested in anything I have to say anyway."

That was true, but I wasn't going to let Reuben win the argument. "Why are you in my office? I thought you had a job to go to."

"I'm not going to let you push me out of your office just because you can't get your way."

I pushed my swivel chair away from the desk, folded my arms, and glared at Reuben. "What do you know about Mr. Brooks? That's the only thing I want to hear from you right now."

"No, I'm not giving you what you want just like that. Things are never that easy in life."

I was thoroughly offended by Reuben's resolve. I told him point blank, "Please leave, or else I will call security to escort you off the premises."

"My father owns more than forty percent of this company, but I will not use that as a means to be malicious. If you want me to leave that badly, I will."

Reuben shook his head as he stood. He walked up to my desk and dropped a manila envelope on my desk. I was amazed that I hadn't recognized that it had been resting next to Reuben the entire time. His gaze pierced me and I could've sworn I saw a measure of pain in his eyes. I wondered if I had been the cause of it or if there were some other issue he was battling with in his personal affairs. At the moment, I really didn't care.

"I don't understand what it is about Taj Brooks that you're so interested in," he told me. "But you had better be careful. Taj Brooks is not all that he purports to be."

I watched Reuben hurry out of my office door, leaving me with an unsettled feeling in my stomach. What did Reuben mean? Was Taj a known rapist? A child molester? A killer? I composed myself and tried to understand what was really going on with my boss' son. Was he jealous of Taj Brooks? But why? I tried to imagine Reuben crossing paths with Taj, but it wasn't making any sense to me. What could be the reason why those two would know of each other?

So I did the next thing any sane woman would do. I pulled up the Internet on my laptop and typed Taj Brooks into the search engine. Dozens of pages came up with his name on it, but I could tell I would be wasting my time. Why would I want to put myself through this torture anyway? I refused to believe I'd almost given up my virginity to some unscrupulous pervert. Oh God, feel like I'm digging myself into a pit. What is it with these men? I exited out of the browser and then stared at the manila envelope Reuben had dropped on my desk. I pushed it aside. I had no interest in seeing whatever it was. It was quite clear that Reuben had an agenda and I wanted no part of it.
Chapter Ten

Tonight was Friday night – game night for the girls. It'd been three days since I'd last seen or heard from Taj, which was perfectly fine with me. Though in the back of my mind, I questioned why he hadn't called to at least apologize for his presumptuous behavior. I needed the time anyway to regain my peace of mind. However, that peace was disrupted when Jennifer called and told me that she and Taj were minutes away from my condo. By then I'd already rehearsed in my mind a dozen different ways I was going to act when I saw Taj.

I already knew he altered my senses, simply by the way he walked into a room. It was that experience at the maid's cottage that was making me feel uncomfortable. Would Jennifer be able to detect that her fiancé had been trying to mess around with me? I felt bad that I couldn't say anything to Jennifer about it because my own attraction for Taj had bought my silence. This wasn't me at all. Being smitten with a man that didn't belong to me was one thing, but the fact that I couldn't shake myself out of this spell was frightening. The only thing that I could surmise was that this was a trial designed to test my will to remain pure.

Despite the doubts Reuben had tried to plant in my head about Taj, in addition to an unsettling curiosity I had of Taj's character, I could not get past that handsome face. The way he looked at me with that intense gaze sent electricity flying through my veins. When I heard the doorbell buzzing, I quickly worked my feet into my four-inch heels. I straightened up, but before I left my bedroom to answer the door, I stopped in front of a full-length mirror to get one last look at my appearance. I wore a yellow form-fitting dress, which hugged my hips a little too tightly. Hopefully, no one would really notice as this dress had been the easiest thing to iron.

I opened the door, but was surprised to see Taj standing alone with that devious smirk on his face. My throat suddenly went dry. Those three days I hadn't seen him, seemed to have accentuated his dashing looks. With brazen hunger, he bathed me with his eyes.

"The way you look," he said to me, "is going to get me into trouble with Jennifer."

I looked over his shoulders, ignoring his inappropriate comment. "Where is Jennifer?"

"She had a run to make; she'll be right back."

"I don't believe you."

He grinned. "I swear, I had nothing to do with it. She told me to keep company with you until she arrives."

Wow. The devil just doesn't know when to stop. I'm trying to run away from the temptation, now he's bringing it to my doorstep.

I peered at Taj with as much resolve as I could muster. "Listen, Taj. About that incident in the maid's cottage...I don't feel good about that. That is so not my style. In fact, it absolutely goes against my Christian beliefs."

The mention of my holy standards didn't wipe that lustful leer off of Taj's face as I thought it would. He tilted his head, allowing his gaze to slowly climb up and down my body. "Well," he said, "we really haven't done anything...yet. And I'm sure God won't mind if I give you one little kiss. Didn't the bible say something about greeting each other with a kiss?" He reached out and ran his fingers along the outline of my lips. "You are so beautiful..."

I stepped back to get away from the sensation. "It says a holy kiss and there's nothing holy about what you're doing right now. Please don't use God's word to justify sin."

"Is that what you think I'm doing?"

"Yes and I'm disappointed that you would do something like that"—I folded my arms— "because I believe that this has been your intention all along."

Taj held my gaze. "What?"

"To get me alone so that you could run your game on me, which makes me wonder how many women you've already done this with behind Jennifer's back."

Taj tossed his head back and laughed. "Well, what can I say? You're quite sharp, but I am usually a one-woman man. Whether you believe this or not, I wish I'd met you before meeting Jennifer..." He paused as if to let his words marinate my thoughts. "Besides, why does it bother you that I'm now showing interest? I assumed it was what you wanted."

"That is very presumptuous of you to say," I spat. "Your assumption is wrong. Jennifer is my best friend and I would never do anything to hurt her."

Taj smirked, as he moved in to resume tracing his fingers around my lips. "Never say never," he said. "Because I have a pretty good handle on recognizing a woman's weakness. You want me, as much as I want you..."

The way Taj continued to graze his fingers against my skin caused my heart to slam harder against my chest. The adrenaline paralyzed me, leaving me exposed to Taj's blatant advances. He pushed me inside and closed the door behind us. He wasted no time attacking my lips, trying to find those areas on my neck he wanted to mark as his territory. Warning bells were ringing loudly in the back of my mind, but I had suddenly been caught off guard by the insidious flames of passion.

Thankfully, the buzzing of my doorbell knocked me out of my stupor. I was frantic, upset and guilt-ridden – all in one, as the voices behind the door belonged to Maya and Kimone. I pushed Taj away from me, knowing that as soon as I opened that door, those two inquisitive birds would know something sinful was going on between me and Taj, who on the other hand, was as cool as a cucumber. He turned away and strutted into my living room with that devilish smirk. He then laid back against my sofa and flicked on the flat screen TV as if he were a guest in a five-star hotel. I stared at him in shock, because it made me wonder if he'd been caught in a situation like this before.

When I opened the door, Maya and Kimone came in with a racket. Maya, who was close to my age of twenty-nine, catwalked into my foyer and swung her perfectly-toned hips straight toward the minibar. She was Asian mixed with something else, but who cared with what? Her blemish-free skin and long black ringlets always made me give her the evil eye. Kimone kept a low haircut, but her high cheekbones and her expressive eyes were distinctive. She was at least five feet ten, and undoubtedly, one of the most beautiful-looking black women I'd ever come across on this side of the world.

My gaze found Taj, who was lazily moving his eyes back and forth between Maya and Kimone. Both of them had impressive bodies, curves turning every which way. I sighed because jealousy was about to kill me, which was a reaction I'd been battling with for a while. However, nothing was killing me more now than the way Taj kept looking at my friends, particularly Maya. It wasn't overtly sexual, but obvious enough to make me wonder if he wanted them as well.

I twisted my neck to Jennifer's high-pitched screams as she stood in the front door and waltzed her way in. I swore, each time Jennifer did that, my heart took a dive to the floor. It's worse now since I was afraid of being caught doing something I shouldn't be doing with Taj. She walked up to me and greeted me with a kiss to the cheek. She then handed me a small gift bag filled with little Hersey delights.

"I'm apologizing for my behavior the other day when we were in Starbucks," she said. "You are a true friend to me, Sierra, and I can't say enough how blessed I am to have you in my life. I love you, sweetie. By the way, I love this yellow dress you're wearing. It's so-not-you, but it's sexy."

My guilt roared back to life and pinned my words against my throat. I didn't put on this yellow dress to be sexy, but because Jennifer was my best friend, I took her observation as a compliment. Suddenly, vivid images of Taj's cornering me in the maid's cottage flashed through my mind, coupled with that passionate kiss we'd shared just moments before everyone else walked in. I wanted to run and hide my wickedness beneath the ocean's floor. When Jennifer wrapped her arms around me with tears in her eyes, I thought I was going to die from regret. I vowed from that day onward to avoid Taj and pray that my integrity be fully restored. Because giving in to temptation wasn't worth losing my relationship with God, or throwing away eighteen years of genuine friendship with Jennifer.

"Sierra, honey," I heard Maya call from the minibar. She had already fixed herself a soft drink and was sipping it slowly. I wished I had her dove-looking eyes. "What game are we playing tonight?"

"Dirty Minds," Kimone called out as I stepped out of Jennifer's embrace. I could no longer look my best friend directly in the eye. "We haven't played that one in a while."

"Oooh, I love that game," Jennifer jumped in. "Gets my juices flowing."

"Now that is just plain nasty," Maya snapped. "Ain't none of us gon' be cleaning up after your gross behind!"

Everyone exploded in laughter even though for me it was only a show. I was too sick of my mess to enjoy a genuine laugh. Again, my gaze found Taj en route to the famous game table – just to see if he was looking in my direction. He was. Right before I turned my head away, he gave me a subtle smile that said, "I want you." I knew he was aware of how dangerously sexy he was, but he hadn't any idea of the amount of misery it was costing me.

"Honey," Jennifer called out to her fiancé, "do you want to play Dirty Minds with the girls?"

"Naw, I will sit this one out, babe," he responded. "If I may say so myself, my mind is already filled with all sorts of dirty things."

Jennifer gasped at her fiancé's response. "Honey," she dragged, "have a little respect for the girls. They don't want to hear about what we do in the bedroom."

I rolled my eyes, knowing how much Jennifer enjoyed bragging about her sexual escapades.

Kimone cleared her throat and said, "Let the man talk. My life is empty and quite dull. Ever since I lost my little Fergie, life has been at a standstill."

Maya flipped her black ringlets to one side, and spat, "You need to be committed to a mental institution. Who the hell keeps rats as pets?"

Kimone exploded, "I keep telling you and Sierra that Fergie is not a rat! He's a hamster!"

"Girls, girls, girls, let's not get carried away," I jumped in. "I don't intend to be here all night. I'm tired and I'm looking forward to going to bed real soon."

Maya huffed, "Not with that hot-looking yellow dress you have on. It looks like you're planning to do one of those late-night booty calls. Tell the truth, boo, that's the reason why you want us to leave."

I didn't appreciate Maya talking to me as if I were a low-priced whore. Whenever a bunch of women got together, you could expect unnecessary drama. I wisely ignored Maya, and then moved swiftly with the instructions of the game once we all were sitting at the table.

"Please listen carefully to the clues. I will give a short demonstration just in case someone has forgotten how to play the game." I picked up the first clue and read it. "Schwarzenegger has a long one, Spike Lee has a short one, but the pope doesn't use his. What is the answer?"

"That's easy," Taj said behind me. I turned my head and he was near enough to touch.

"It's not what you're thinking, honey," Jennifer explained. "It's a play on words, designed to mess with your mind."

"How do you know what I'm thinking?" Taj smirked. "My answer was going to be...their last names. Think about it: Schwarzenegger has a long one, Spike Lee has a short one, but the pope doesn't use his. Easy enough, right? Now, whose mind is dirty?"

Everyone looked at me for confirmation. "He's right," I said. "It's says it right here."

Taj said, "Please, carry on, I was simply on my way to the bathroom."

I willed myself not to look at Taj as he walked away. He had a very sensual strut and I didn't need anything to provoke my lust. Because as far as I was concerned, I already had a lot of repenting to do.
Chapter Eleven

As soon as the girls left, I rushed upstairs to my quietude. My TV had already been preset to TBN and Bishop Errol Jackson was on. I looked at my watch, which said that it was 9:39 p.m. I was a bit disappointed because I'd forgotten about the three-day crusade to be held by Bishop Errol Jackson at the Hilton Hotel. But TBN had been so kind as to announce that the bishop would be streaming live tonight between the hours of 8:00 p.m. and 10:00 p.m. for those who couldn't make it to the hotel.

Well, there was about twenty minutes left of the program and even though I'd enjoyed spending time with the girls tonight, I wish I'd canceled because I felt like I'd missed a very important message the Lord wanted me to hear. I sat on the bed and focused my attention on the TV anyway. It was better to glean something than to glean nothing at all. Bishop Errol Jackson seemed to be winding down from what appeared to have been an extremely intense sermon. His face was covered in sweat and his expression had a dismal look to it.

" _The devil can't make us do anything we don't want to do..." he said, "...except if we allow him. Yes, he can influence our thoughts and make his suggestions seem irresistible, but the ultimate decision is left up to us. Will we obey God's word or will we be drawn away by our own lust? I learned this lesson the hard way. When I was locked up in that prison for committing one of the most humiliating sins a preacher can commit, the words of the Apostle James echoed through my soul._

"And this is what he says in chapter 1, verses 14 and 15, 'Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.' So you see, my brothers and my sisters, the word of God expects us to fully accept the responsibility for our actions. We can't go around blaming the devil or anyone else for our poor choices. The blame rests with us. But of course, God doesn't leave us defenseless.

"1 Corinthians 10:13 says, 'The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure." But if we are to benefit from God's word, we must study it seriously and use it as a weapon against the attacks of the devil. Don't make the mistake of forsaking the attendance of church, because it is the plan of the enemy to lure you away from sound teaching..."

I didn't move a muscle until Bishop Jackson concluded with a prayer that left me weeping in repentance. Because everything he said ministered to the situation I was experiencing with Taj. Indeed, a strong warning that was shrouded in an abundance of love. However, nothing got to me more than when Bishop Jackson mentioned the part about attending church. For three months, I had been inconsistent.

Sure, I could blame it on the demands of my job, but truthfully, I feared the sins of my heart would be exposed. I was trying to get rid of these crazy feelings for Taj – I really was. Yet, each day I found myself entrenched between conviction and a deep longing only a man like Taj could satisfy. Was Bishop Jackson saying that by me not attending church, I was making the situation worse? Maybe it was, but who could I talk to about my predicament?

I realized God was speaking to me on many different levels because everywhere I turned, there seemed to be a message customized just for me. But how could I find the courage to do what needed to be done? My friends were not apt to provide me with any sort of spiritual resource, which only added to my burdened soul. Could it be a sign that it was time for me to change my circle of acquaintances? With a heavy sigh, I slid to my knees and began to pour my heart out to God. I needed answers. I needed a way out. I needed to be consoled.

****

Saturday

Still feeling numb from last night's introspection, I called in to the office and explained that I would be late as I was scheduled to show a young couple a 3.5 million-dollar property at 9:30 p.m. I tossed my laptop bag over my shoulder, and then stepped outside my condo. I turned toward the staircase only to find my face buried in the burly chest of a man. He smelt like aftershave, which was very light-scented and appealing. Totally stumped, I stumbled backwards.

"Reuben?"

"I didn't mean to frighten you," he said. "I went to your office, but you weren't there. You won't answer my calls, so I took a chance on coming here. I need to talk to you about something really important."

Pulling my wits together, I snapped at him. "Has it occurred to you that I'm not interested in anything you have to say?"

He grinned despite my attitude. "Wow. I guess you're still upset because I won't tell you what I know about Taj Brooks?"

I stiffened at the mention of Taj's name. "Listen to me, Reuben, whatever your agenda is, I want no part of it, okay? It's nice to see the great changes you've made to your body and all, but –"

"You never really told me how you feel about that," he said, cutting me off. "I see in your eyes you are very pleased, but you don't allow it to go beyond that point."

"I did tell you I was pleased with your transformation," I said in my defense.

"No, your exact words were, 'What the heck happened to you?' Even though I would've preferred you say something less abrasive, I took it as a compliment. I figured you were surprised to see me looking so different from the last time you saw me."

"Well, I was caught off guard. And you do look...different." I steeled myself against any tender emotion I was feeling for Reuben. "But your body is the only thing that has changed about you."

He folded his arms and narrowed his eyes at me. "Wow, you really don't believe that I've given my life over to God. Everything I told you about my conversion in Beijing is true. I have no reason to lie."

"Really? So why do you still seem to be the same smug little brat who does whatever he wants to do? You don't care about anyone but yourself."

"Come on, Sierra. Is that really your perception about me? Because I feel entirely different about you."

"Are you trying to make me feel guilty?"

Reuben's eyes filled with concern, but I tried to pass it off as something else – maybe self-pity. "You're the most self-giving, loyal, hard-working person that I know," he told me. "If anyone succeeds in this real estate business, and ultimately in life, it will be you. I have the utmost respect and adoration for you. You're always trying to better yourself and to achieve beyond what many don't have the nerve to even dream. It's the reason why I handed that thirty-million-dollar contract over to you. I'm sure this could turn out to be the largest sold property any agent has ever done at the firm – even beyond anything my father has sold."

I pierced Reuben with a stupefied gaze. "What did you say?"

"I said you're the most self-giving, loyal –"

"No...the part about the thirty-million-dollar contract."

Reuben gave me a side glance as if to say that I was trying to make a joke out of a serious situation. But after observing how genuinely confused I was, he couldn't hide his disappointment when he questioned me about it. "You didn't open the manila envelope, did you?"

I wanted to lie, but I was so overcome with fear of what I could have potentially messed up that I relinquished my churlish attitude immediately. "Reuben, I'm so sorry..."

"I don't want your apology right now," he snapped at me. "I promised Mr. Sullivan that you would get back to him today with the paperwork."

Now I was really confused. "What paperwork?"

Reuben sighed heavily and I could tell he was really disappointed. "Where is the envelope?"

"I left it at the office on my desk," I replied, embarrassed by how stupid I'd been acting toward him. "I thought you wanted to show me your job acceptance letter."

"Come on, Sierra, you're killing me. I need you to go to your office and review that contract, and then get your butt down to Ripped Bodies Fitness Center by noon. I got the job as a nutritional expert, but I also landed one of our largest clients through casually talking about my background in real estate. Mr. Fenton Sullivan is the owner of a chain of exclusive fitness centers throughout the Caribbean, and he's looking to expand his business model on a waterfront inlet."

Even though I didn't quite get the full scope of what was going on, I called my nine-thirty appointment and rescheduled it for Monday morning. Reuben was only twenty-three years old, but he had vast knowledge of the real estate business. He was also a good conversationalist and I was bound to believe he'd won Mr. Sullivan's trust with little effort. My problem with Reuben boiled down to how he executed that knowledge, which had always been disgracefully ostentatious.

Like the time when he was about to land a seven-million-dollar contract with a local millionaire. He sent out an email to the other agents and shamelessly invited them to a celebration to showcase his hard work. But maybe Reuben was right. I hadn't given him the benefit of the doubt that an arrogant jerk like him could be genuinely transformed into a new creation – as so ably explained in 2 Corinthians 5:17.

In any event, I was blown away that Reuben would recommend my services to such a high-powered mogul in the business world. If I was able to secure this thirty-million-dollar contract, I would be propelled into the arena of a true real estate powerhouse. Not even my boss, who was Reuben's father would be able to boast of such a record. However, I was wary about why Reuben hadn't taken the business to his father since I'd been treating him like dirt ever since he got back from Beijing. Oh Lord, I don't even know what to say. Had I been too judgmental with Reuben? Your word clearly advises against it and here I am following the dictates of my flesh. Please forgive me...

"I don't even know what to say, Reuben," I finally told him. "You would have never done this for anyone two years ago, but by that same token, you've made me eat my own words. You are not as selfish as I'd thought."

"I did this because I think the world of you. You deserve it."

I tried not to blush, but Reuben was staring at me so intensely that I actually started to pay attention to the outline of his face. He was a blend of the late Paul Walker and another good-looking actor I couldn't name right then. His fierce gray eyes were starting to grow on me. I didn't know if it was because he'd done something so generous. But whatever his intentions were, I was beginning to see him in a different light.

"I am tempted to ask your motives for wanting to do something like this, but I don't want to ruin the moment."

"Don't. Let's just celebrate it over dinner tonight. It's all I'm asking of you."

"Don't you think it's a little too early to celebrate? I haven't really gotten the sale as yet."

Reuben smiled. "Trust me, it's pretty much a done deal."

Coming from someone so well-versed in real estate, I believed him. However, my conscience was talking to me strong about my own motives. Five minutes ago I was prepared to sling a few more insults at Reuben, but now I was being careful because I didn't want him to regret recommending Mr. Sullivan to me. "Well, thank you, Reuben. And I'm so sorry to have treated you so mean. It is certainly not the Christian thing to do. I've been under so much pressure lately...and I know that's not a good excuse, but –"

"No worries, just show up at the Mesa Grill at eight tonight and we'll call it a draw."

"All right, let's shake on it." I smiled back. My career was about to soar into a higher dimension and the help came from someone I least expected. "Wish me luck."

"You don't need it," Reuben said before leaning over to kiss me on the cheek. "It's a done deal. All I want is to see you happy."
Be alert and of a sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.

1 Peter 5:8
Chapter Twelve

Approximately seven hours later, I jumped behind the wheel of my car with a grin going from one ear to the other. I'd just left Mr. Sullivan's office with high hopes. Because the inlets he wanted to see required the use of a helicopter, I'd arranged with one of our guys at the office to schedule the tour for another day. In the meantime, I showed Mr. Sullivan unretouched photos of pristine acreage with sandy white beaches, groves of palm trees throughout, with natural freshwater streams. Infrastructure was already in place, which was a huge plus, because of Mr. Sullivan's concern of the added cost if he had to put in the infrastructure himself.

All in all, the meeting went well just as Reuben had expected. I left Mr. Sullivan with four vacant inlets to choose from – each starting at around thirty million dollars. To say I was ecstatic, would be a gross understatement. I was high as a kite and was now in the mood to really celebrate. When I got back to my condo, it was close to four in the afternoon – enough time to pick out something nice to wear for dinner that evening with Reuben. I was so excited about what this contract could mean for my career that I was bursting to tell someone about it.

I dropped my laptop and handbag on the sofa and then reached for the cordless phone out of its cradle. I noticed a red light blinking on the answering machine, which I instinctively played as I set out to dial Kimone's number. The machine beeped a few times and then I heard his husky voice.

" _I can't get you out of my system...so warm...so inviting...going crazy thinking about you...call me..._

Beep.

I replayed that message about half a dozen times before I decided to delete it. In silence, I walked to my bedroom and sat on my bed to cool the heat messing with my ears. Taj needed not say a whole lot to lure me back into that dark place – that place where it was almost impossible for me to ignore those ungodly desires. I suddenly became upset with Taj for having such control over my emotions. How was I to ever be free of this man if he continued to pursue me like this? Thoroughly confounded, I remained on my bed for nearly half an hour, trying to recapture my good mood.

I didn't even want to call Kimone anymore. The internal battle between good and evil raged on within me and the only thing I wanted to do was to sleep it off. But just in case I overslept, I walked to my closet and pulled out a red, formal dress to wear for that evening. Picked out my shoes and matching accessories. Hopefully Reuben would be a good diversion to help me get my mind off of Taj.

But how absurd for me to think that Reuben would be good company when several hours ago I couldn't stand being around him. He was handsome in his own way, but more importantly, he was unattached. Maybe if I were attracted to him, it would have made this situation less complicated. Lord, please, this is becoming too much.

****

I woke to the ringing of my cell phone. With my eyes still heavy with sleep, I swiped it off the bureau and put it against my ear. When I heard Jennifer's voice, I eased up against the headboard and looked at the time. It was fifteen after six in the evening and I couldn't believe I'd slept for nearly two hours.

"Sierra, I've been trying to call you all day," Jennifer complained. "Why haven't you been answering your phone, sweets?"

"I had my ringer turned off."

"Why the heck would you do that?"

To avoid Taj, I wanted to say, but instead, I tersely replied, "I was in a very important meeting for most of the day and I didn't want to be interrupted. I'm sorry."

There was a pause on Jennifer's end, which made me think the line had dropped. "It seems as if you're on the path for another promotion. Good for you."

"Well..." It was my time to pause. I dithered in my decision to tell Jennifer about the meeting with Mr. Fenton Sullivan. She didn't seem too thrilled to hear about my successes tonight. "Let's just say if everything after this meeting continues to be positive, it will put me way ahead of my competition. I owe Reuben a great deal of thanks. He's the one who recommended my services and I'm extremely happy he did."

"Reuben is in town?" Jennifer's voice peaked. "How could you be so selfish and not tell me?"

My brows furrowed in confusion because Jennifer was never that excited to hear about Reuben. As a matter of fact, she'd barely asked about him in the two years he'd been living in Beijing. "I wasn't aware you had such an interest in Reuben," I teased. "Don't forget that you have another man's ring on your finger."

"Don't be silly," Jennifer spat. "I'm amazed that you didn't mentioned it when all you ever did was complain to me about how much Reuben got on your nerves. Now you're suddenly singing his praises. Is he still overweight?"

Jennifer's words stung, but they were the truth. However, I didn't need her pointing out something to me I already knew. "No...he has lost over one hundred and fifty pounds."

"What! No wonder there's a change in you. I sensed it last night when we were playing Dirty Games. You're different somehow. Wait a minute...have you been secretly having a rendezvous with Reuben and attempting to hide it from me? You naughty little girl!"

"What's the matter with you? To even suggest that I'm remotely interested in Reuben that way is completely preposterous. You know my focus is on building a stronger connection with God. I don't need anything distracting me right now."

Wow, I was becoming too good at masking the truth...Jennifer needed to know that Taj is not the faithful man she thinks he is. How dare he assume that I would keep quiet about his actions? So what if I'm helplessly attracted to him. That doesn't mean it's right...

"I'm just saying, sweets," Jennifer said, disrupting my mental tirade. "You seem different. Like you're hiding something from me. Don't forget, we've been friends since the eighth grade. I know you very well."

"Well, you've always had an active imagination."

"I'm not buying it, but since you don't want to talk about it, I'll leave it alone."

"There's really nothing to talk about, Jennifer. If there was, you know I would have told you by now."

"Whatever you say. I didn't call to drill you about your boring life anyway. What are your plans for tonight?"

My eyes swung to my alarm clock, which showed it was now twenty minutes to seven. I had a little over an hour to get dressed and head to the Mesa Grill to meet Reuben, but I was not about to relay that to Jennifer.

"I have plans for tonight," I replied simply. "Why'd you ask?"

"Well, it looks like I'll be spending a few extra hours at the office tonight. I'm trying to balance one of our ledger accounts, which is off by eighty-three thousand dollars and some change."

"Wow, that's huge. I've never heard of you being unable to balance your accounts."

"Well, there's a first time for everything," Jennifer said. "I'm asking a small favor of you. So please tell me that you will do it."

"I have to be somewhere at eight tonight, but I promise that I will at least try."

"Thank you, sweets. Do you still have that spare key to my house?"

"Yes..."

"Great! There's a check for nineteen hundred dollars on the dresser in my bedroom. A lady by the name of Dale Strummer is scheduled to come by my home this evening at seven- thirty to pick it up. Can you get the check and give it to her, please? I'm taking out a new life insurance policy on Taj. Something happens to him and I'm an instant millionaire."

"Jennifer, I don't find that remotely funny, even if you are kidding."

"Of course I'm kidding," she giggled. "You need to lighten up. It's a down payment to have my kitchen remodeled in time for the wedding. I can't afford to live in the rich coves of Paradise Island like you, so I have to settle for what my money can buy."

I struggled not to tell Jennifer about the surprise that Taj was working on. I didn't want her wasting nineteen hundred dollars on a home she wouldn't be living in. But then I thought that maybe Taj couldn't really afford a four-million-dollar home anyway and that it was wise that Jennifer wanted to invest in something that was secure. She could always list the home on the market for sale if Taj was able to put his money where his mouth was.

"How come you didn't ask Taj to do it? He lives with you, right?"

"I have asked him, but he's working late tonight as well. Sierra, please, tell me you will do it. It's very important that Ms. Strummer gets that check tonight; otherwise, I will have to pay the full price of the renovation."

"Okay," I said. "That means I will have to break a heel trying to get out in time for my eight o'clock appointment."

Jennifer laughed. "Thanks, sweets. You're the reason why we're such good friends. Love you much."

I disconnected from Jennifer, feeling like I'd just been struck by an eighteen wheeler. But the feeling quickly dwindled as I jumped to my feet and switched into adrenaline mode. In less than forty minutes, I'd showered, gotten dressed and was in my car heading to Jennifer's house. The clock on my dashboard read, 7:21 p.m. I convinced myself that I had a lot of time to fulfil Jennifer's request and still be back across the bridge in time to meet Reuben.
Chapter Thirteen

I eased my Mercedes into Jennifer's driveway and then shut off the engine. I stared at the white single-story building and was impressed at how well-maintained it looked. The lawn had been freshly cut and the trees beautifully trimmed. I assumed it was Taj's handiwork, because Jennifer didn't show much interest in how her property appeared on the outside. So it had lacked that curb appeal I'd been trying to tell her about. Having a man around the home – other than for sex – counted for something.

The slight pain in my chest was a stark reminder that as fine and as tempting as Taj was, he wasn't mine. It didn't matter how badly I wanted him, it was wrong to harbor these feelings, or to be passive about his determination to pursue me. But God knew I was trying to maintain my distance. That was why I had hesitated coming to Jennifer's home, simply because I didn't want to risk running into Taj. That would be a disaster. I couldn't look at him without melting into a puddle of emotions.

Since his limo was nowhere in sight, I thought it was best to hurry in and out. Ms. Strummer should be here any minute, as it was slightly past seven thirty. With Jennifer's spare key in hand, I jammed it in the keyhole and gave it a twist. The front door creaked open and I entered into the quiet space. I wasted no time going to Jennifer's bedroom to look for the check. However, I wasn't prepared for what I walked into. A pair of handcuffs greeted me at the door. A lacy brassiere, which I assumed belonged to Jennifer, was haphazardly thrown on the shade of a lamp.

My gaze moved over to the rumpled sheets, which looked like two people had been in a severe wrestling match. Pillows were on the floor and right in front of the bed was a half-empty container of strawberries. The space was untidy and my first thought was that Jennifer needed to hire a maid, but as I moved deeper into the room and locked stares on an open box of condoms, I suddenly understood the reason behind the chaos. My insides became a rumpled mess.

Instead of searching for the check where Jennifer told me to look, I grabbed the ends of the satin sheets and shook them in the vicinity of my nostrils. I couldn't explain what drove me to do it. Maybe I needed to be reminded that Taj was not the type of man I should be messing with. He was of the world, who unashamedly indulged in the pleasures of sin and he would only lure me away into grave immorality – as he had so ably done to my best friend, Jennifer. The sheets reeked of corruption, which should have ignited a holy anger within me. But lurking in its place, was the spirit of jealousy.

I closed my eyes to stop the hot tears from flowing. Why did I let Jennifer swindle me into this trap? I was doing fine until I stepped into this room. Inside of me was screaming to drop everything and run for my life, but my feet felt as if blocks of cement had hardened around them. I was completely overcome with the atmosphere to the point where it almost felt as if I were under a spell.

"I had no idea you wanted me as much as I want you."

The hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention when I heard Taj's voice. I thought I'd imagined it, but I could feel the presence of someone behind me. The satin sheets fell away from my fingers as I turned to face him. He was standing in the doorway, impeccably dressed in a black tuxedo. I sucked in a mouthful of oxygen when my eyes leveled with his lecherous gaze. I wondered how long he'd been standing there, watching me.

"I...er...Jennifer wanted me to get something for her," I stammered and then began moving my steps forward. "I was about to leave."

He began to move forward too, his expensive leather shoes making a tapping sound on the hardwood floors. I stopped within about two feet of him because I knew his intention was to block me.

"I don't have much time," he said, too husky for me to mistake what was in his sinful mind.

"Like I said, I was on my way out," I repeated.

He grinned. "By the way you look in this smashing red dress, I assume you have somewhere to go. So, let's make this quick."

He pulled me into his chest and before I knew it, his luscious pink lips were bearing down on my mine. I didn't have time to process what was happening. My mouth went dry and it felt as if the entire room was in a merry-go-round. My resistance was hanging by a thin thread and the only thing I could muster was a weak plea for Taj to reconsider. "Please don't make me do this...I..."

"Explanations can wait," Taj shushed me, as he strategically pressed his lips around the areas of my neck. "You know you want me; so stop resisting...I will be gentle with you..."

Resist him and flee for your life! It was such a clear command, but I was so consumed with the idea of being in the arms of Taj Brooks that I wanted to believe my mind was playing tricks on me. In fact, every scripture I'd studied on temptation seemed to have been blotted from my thoughts. And that should have been another red flag. The minute Taj untied the straps of my red dress and began to caress my shoulders, that small little voice abandoned me completely. I began to relax and enjoy something I knew was forbidden. We were well into a full minute of heavy kissing when I heard Maya's voice coming at me like a clap of thunder.

"You backstabbing slut!" Her Asian dialect was very pronounced. "You will not get away with this!"

Before I could move myself completely out of Taj's grasp, Maya was halfway in the room, spitting out a slew of nasty expletives.

"I knew my ears weren't deceiving me! What the hell is this mess?"

Taj stood in front of me as if to protect me. As he was refastening his belt, I took the opportunity to put back on my dress. Taj's mouth was pulled into a grim line, but when he spoke, his tone was surprisingly measured. "Maya, why did you come out of the limo?"

"You dirty pig!" she huffed. She closed in the distance between her and Taj and began jabbing her finger in his face. "I knew it was Sierra's Mercedes in the driveway and you told me it wasn't. I knew something wasn't right. You left me in that backseat because you knew all along you were going to sleep with this slut! You lied to me! You told me that I was the only one!"

Maya's unexpected entry into the room was already a nightmare, but to hear her claim that she and Taj had been sleeping together knocked the wind out of my body. I could barely breathe when I spat from behind Taj's back, "As if this isn't already humiliating enough for me, but you're sleeping with Maya too? I should have known..."

Maya tried to get at me, but Taj held her back. "Of course he's sleeping with me, you two-timing whore! Acting like you're so much better than us with your fancy job and nice house, but you're a worse slut than all of us put together! You are supposed to be a Christian! Christians don't go around stealing people's men and having sex in their best friend's bedroom. All this time you were pretending to be something you aren't! So don't stand there and act like you didn't want it! You just wait until this gets out..."

Maya's words shook me to the core. I was terrified, disappointed, confused and humiliated – all at once. And what made me feel worst was that my testimony had been tarnished in the worst possible way. No longer would Maya have any faith in me or ever listen to my sermons about staying pure. Taj just stood with his head hanging down, a total mute. The only response I got from him was when he tried to block me from leaving. I drew back and slapped him.

"Sierra, let me explain," he cried out.

With conviction shadowing my flight, I bolted out of the room and made a beeline toward the front door. I was too numb to speak. Moreover, I couldn't believe how such a perfect day could unravel into something so horrid and so profane. If I'd said no to Jennifer and had gone directly to the Mesa Grill to meet Reuben, or if I'd run out of Jennifer's bedroom when I'd had the opportunity, I wouldn't be in this godless predicament. The word of God suddenly began pouring into my soul like a dam that had been let loose.

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour...Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away...No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man...He will provide a way of escape for you...

Was this some sick joke? Why couldn't I recall those words the moment I needed them the most? Was God telling me that I hadn't been alert or was the devil using such words to taunt me? Please God, help me to understand where I went wrong...have mercy on me...forgive me. I've failed You, I've failed Jennifer and I've failed myself. I knew nothing good would come out of pining over another woman's man. But I let my lust consume me and drag me down a path that led to nothing but chaos and destruction.

My hand finally reached out to grab the doorknob, but I was jerked backwards by someone pulling on my hair. I screamed out in pain as both Maya and I careened into a small table that was in the foyer.

"How dare you walk away from me," Maya growled. "You slept with my man and you think I'm gonna let you get off that easily? Get back here, you backstabbing hypocrite!"

Maya gripped my waist and violently swung me into the sheetrock. I saw butterflies as I tumbled toward the tiles. Taj didn't belong to either of us and yet Maya had gone nuts. I tried to imagine the beast Maya would turn into if Taj had really been her man. Mind you, Maya had always had a despicable temper, but this was nothing like I'd ever seen. I tried to stand to my feet, but I was in so much physical pain that I thought it best to remain where I was.

That was my biggest mistake. Maya pounced on me and began to scratch like an obstreperous cat. To defend myself, I jabbed her in the stomach with my knee. She fell back a little, but it was enough time for me to raise my right leg and give her a strong kick. I had on heels and I felt when it punctured a soft area on her body. She wobbled into Taj's arms, spitting out an even stronger slew of expletives in my direction. He detained her, but not without a noisy struggle.

Shortly after, a pair of car headlights shone through the window. Next, I heard an engine turn off and then a car door slammed. I crawled to the base of the window and looked out. It was Jennifer, briskly walking on the lawn toward her front door. Taj must have seen the headlights too, because he placed a hand over Maya's mouth and dragged her toward the kitchen exit. A desperate plea blazed from the altar of my heart; I knew if Jennifer saw my sweaty appearance, there was no possible way I would be able to keep the truth from her.

Lord, if You get me out of this mess, I will recommit my life to You and serve You with everything that lies within me. No more ignoring Your voice and running away from the calling you've placed on my life. But most of all, I beg You, give me the strength to flush Taj Brooks out of my system!

~~~

See a sneak preview below of what's coming up next. But first, did you enjoy the first installment of the Temptation Series? Sign up here to be notified when H. H. Fowler announces the next release. You can unsubscribe at any time.

****

A sneak preview of Book 2 – Lust of the Flesh (Available Now)

Despite my heartfelt prayer, I ran like the wind toward Jennifer's powder room and locked myself in it. I still couldn't believe that forty minutes ago I was in my best friend's bedroom about to commit the unpardonable with my best friend's fiancé– only to be caught by Maya, a friend who I found out had already been sleeping with Taj. My heart slammed against my chest at the possible outcomes of this night. The fact that Jennifer was probably inspecting her house by now kept me begging God for His mercies.

I stared in the mirror at my disheveled appearance and soon noticed a small abrasion above my left eye. No doubt it was the result of Maya swinging me into the sheetrock. I couldn't understand why she'd attacked me instead of Taj, who should be the one held responsible for this senseless racket. But then I was sharply reminded of the disgust on Maya's face. I, of all people should have known better. A professed Christian who constantly preached about abstaining from sex and obeying God's holy commands had suddenly become the biggest hypocrite. I was so humiliated that I wished I had wings to fly to some distance country and hide my wickedness.

Yes, I was a highly-skilled, licensed real estate professional and lived in one of the most affluent spots on this island. And at six months from thirty-years-old, I had been saving my virginity for marriage, (which would have been completely destroy hadn't Maya walked in on me and Taj), but all of it seemed so trivial in the face of my sin. By all intents and purposes, I was very successful, doing well as a single Christian woman until I laid eyes on Taj Brooks. How in the world did I allow a jerk like that to tarnish my integrity? But could I really blame him for everything? I fantasized about him and on some level, welcomed his advances. I just didn't think that he would turn out to be such an insensitive bastard.

I took piece of tissue and pressed it against the wound. It looked superficial, so once the blood was removed, the abrasion would probably look invisible to the naked eye. I used my fingers like a comb to rake my hair back into place and then used the same hand to smooth out the unevenness in my dress.

The only thing that I couldn't fix right then was the wretchedness I saw in my eyes. Taj was so not the man I thought he was. After tonight, he'd seen the last of me and whatever attraction there had been between us – by the grace of God – would be thoroughly removed out of my system. I wanted nothing to do with Taj Brooks anymore. I'd said that before, but this time I meant it. God knew I meant it. A series of knock clamored against the bathroom door and pushed my blood pressure up another notch.
Questions to Ponder

1. What exactly is temptation and is temptation a sin?

2. Do you think Sierra should have told Jennifer about her attraction to Taj?

3. In your judgment, do you think Sierra sincerely tried to resist her temptation? What would you advise others to do when faced with a similar circumstance?

4. The lust of the eyes was one of the three areas of sin spoken about in the book of 1 John. How much of it do you feel is affecting the church? Are sexual sins the only manifestations of the lust of the eyes?

5. How important is it for Christians to attend church?

6. How would you categorize Sierra? Is she a hearer of the word, or a doer of the word? Give examples.

7. Bishop Errol Jackson quotes, 'We can't go around blaming the devil or anyone for our poor choices.' Do you agree with that statement? Why?

8. Name any other vital points you might have gleaned from this story that you feel should be discussed.
FROM THE DESK OF H H FOWLER

Thank you, my dear readers, for sharing this journey with me. Please visit my blog site: www.churchboyz.org and leave your comments about my story, or contact me at: hhfowler@live.com. Huge appreciation to all for your support and encouraging words. I always say, without you, the reader, we writers could not be successful.
