I'm a celebrity and--
[LAUGHTER]
You know that.
But I do things the same as you.
And I went the other
day to do some shopping.
And just like you, I
go in for one thing
and then I end up
with 40 things.
And unlike you, I pay
with a gold bar, but--
[LAUGHTER]
I noticed while I was
shopping that sometimes stores
have regular products, but
then they have lady products.
Have you noticed that?
Which is the same
thing, but pink.
And they have pink razors,
and they have pink deodorant.
And now I found something
else that comes--
here's the first
thing right there.
It is a gentle laxative tablet.
And I won't tell you
why I bought them,
I'll just tell you who
I bought them for--
Mary.
Well, you asked me
to buy them, Mary.
Let's call that exhibit
A, because I don't want
to say the word laxative again.
And then this is here.
This is exhibit B,
women's gentle laxative
tablets in pink, of course.
That's how you know it's
safe for a lady to take.
Both bottles are the
same price because they
have the same thing inside.
I'm kidding.
The pink one has
40 fewer tablets.
I know that's not a
good deal, because I
ask a man to do the math.
[LAUGHTER]
This-- this is insane.
Same amount of money,
40 less tablets.
That's not the most
ridiculous thing I found.
Because then I went
over to Office Depot.
I didn't need
anything, but I just
wanted to sniff the markers.
[LAUGHTER]
And then I found this.
And it's a super cute
emergency escape hammer.
If you get in a
car accident, you
can use this to cut your
seat belt or break a window.
As you can see,
it's pink and shiny.
That's why I was
immediately drawn to it.
And if you look right here,
it says, get out, girl.
[LAUGHTER]
No, you get out, super cute
emergency escape hammer.
Apparently, the lady car
accidents are adorable.
And there's not even a mirror.
How am I supposed
to check my makeup
after I drive into a lake?
I don't understand.
They sell a non-lady version
that looks like this,
but that's yellow.
That doesn't make
me want to get it.
Plus, how do I get my little
lady hands around something
this big?
The yellow hammer's $8.
The pink one is $12.
Once again, we're
paying more for less.
We don't want pink hammers.
We don't want pink laxatives.
We want the same thing
for the same price.
And a changing room
with decent lighting.
That's what we want.
[APPLAUSE]
And a Friends reunion,
that's what we want.
[CHEERING]
We're going to make that happen.
