

### Relationship With God:

### Putting It All Together

### By

### Jesus (AJ Miller)

### Session 1

### Published by

### Divine Truth, Australia at Smashwords

http://www.divinetruth.com/

Copyright 2014 Divine Truth

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

Thank you for downloading this ebook. You are welcome to share it with your friends. This book may be reproduced, copied and distributed. If you enjoyed this book, please return to Smashwords.com to discover other works by this author. Thank you for your support.

### This ebook is a transcript of a seminar by Jesus (AJ Miller) that took place on 10th August 2013 in Murgon, Queensland, Australia, as part of the Relationship with God series of talks. In this talk Jesus describes the five basics required for progression towards God – love, truth, humility, faith, and will. He discusses the soul condition and soul progression of members of the audience, and how to overcome fear, which is the major impediment to soul growth.

### Reminder From Jesus & Mary

### Jesus and Mary would like to remind you that any document produced by Divine Truth containing any information from Jesus, Mary or any other person includes only a portion of God's Truth that they have personally discovered.

### It does not and cannot contain the entire of God's Truth since God's Truth is infinite and humankind will forever continue to discover more of God's Truth as we progress in receiving more of God's Love.

### Please remember that due to these limitations information contained within this document may need to be revised in the future.

### Many other ebooks have been published by Divine Truth, including ebooks translated into a variety of different languages.

### Please visit <http://www.Smashwords.com/profile/view/DivineTruth> or www.divinetruth.com for further information.

### Additional sessions on the subject in this book can be found on www.Smashwords.com/profile/view/DivineTruth

### For more information go to:

Divine Truth (www.divinetruth.com)

Divine Truth Channel on YouTube (www.youtube.com/user/WizardShak)

Divine Truth FAQ Channel on YouTube (www.youtube.com/user/divinetruthfaq)

Table of Contents

### Putting It All Together: Part 1

1. Introduction

2. The five basics required for progression towards God

2.1. God's Love is an emotion that comes only from God

2.2. Becoming at-one with the way that God loves

2.3. Becoming at-one with God's Absolute Truth

2.4. Desiring to feel every emotion

2.5. Faith that God is good and loves

2.6. Using will in harmony with God's Laws

3. Soul progression by audience members

3.1. An example of single women in the audience

3.2. Placing fear as our god

3.3. Percentages of the audience who have progressed

4. Truth exposes fear

5. Major areas of avoidance of fear

5.1. Beliefs surrounding relationships

5.2. Beliefs surrounding having a relationship with God and how we treat God's Creations

5.3. Increasing awareness of fear through truth

5.4. Dealing with not wanting to know ourselves

5.4.1. An example of wanting control

5.4.2. An example of single women in the audience (continued)

5.4.3. Feeling how much we don't want to know ourselves

6. Our fear creates a prison of our own making

### Putting It All Together: Part 2

7. Developing a desire to feel childhood fear as an adult

7.1. Fear must be felt to grow towards God

7.2. False beliefs surrounding feeling fear

7.2.1. An example of childhood abuse

7.3. Valuing fear blocks the five basics required to grow towards God

7.4. Working through fear with or without God's Assistance

7.5. Our fear is carried with us everywhere

7.6. We must be overwhelmed to grow

8. Common emotional injuries in males in the audience

8.1. The addiction of pleasing women

8.2. Common fears in males in the audience pertaining to women

8.3. Common addictions in the males in the audience that prevent a relationship with God

9. The importance of self-examination of our true soul condition

9.1. The example of single women in the audience (continued)

9.2. Being loving and truthful to others

9.3. Embracing the Divine Truth that we have heard

10. Audience discussion about the feedback

10.1. An example of a participant who blames herself

10.1.1. Blame is a way to avoid emotions

10.2. An example of a participant being afraid to speak up in the workplace

10.3. A lack of humility in audience members

11. God created our souls in a pristine state

11.1. An analogy of having mud on our body

11.2. Emotional injuries enter our soul but are not our pristine self

11.3. Only we can control the state of our soul through the use of our will

12. Closing words

12.1. Spirit influence towards audience members

12.2. Trusting God

12.3. AJ explains his motivation for the feedback

Putting It All Together: Part 1

1. Introduction

How are you today? Good? I'm not very good, not many people want to hear the truth. Welcome today. How many of you is this your first time? Just a few of you. And how many of you have only listened for the last six months or so on YouTube? Most of what I say today will not apply to you, so you're off the hook! (Laughter) When I say it won't apply to you, when I'm talking about the people in the audience, or the percentages of people who are doing this or that you're not included in that because obviously you've just heard the Divine Truth. We would like to welcome you along.

So what I would like to discuss with you today is this subject that is part of the Relationship with God series of talks, and I want to call it "Putting It All Together" and this will be session 1.

Now I want to say at the start of this discussion that many of you are going to walk away today and feel really upset. Some of you will want to be angry with me as a result of today's discussion. The reason why is I'm going to be very blunt with you as a group, particularly the group of people who have been listening for years now. I particularly want to be blunt with you because I feel that many of you are avoiding deep issues of truth in your personal life. And this is what is causing many of your current problems. So I want to discuss with you the reasons why these things are happening and what is really going on.

To do that we want to look at how to put your relationship with God all together and then actually dissect where we are not doing it, to be honest about where we are not doing that, because if we are not honest about that, then of course you'll spend another five years listening without really making any changes. And during that period of time you'll have a lot more spirit influence on you to conform to their way of life and their way of thinking and so forth, you'll have a lot of pressure from Earth and you'll feel very unhappy. And the reason why many of you actually have felt quite unhappy is because of this already. And the more you delay your own progression, the more unhappy you become in fact. And so what I want to do is frankly discuss with you what's going on.

2. The five basics required for progression towards God

To do that I want to remind you of the five basic things you need for progression towards God. What are they? Let's start with the most important one - what's that? A desire to love isn't it, really? Love. Would you put truth or humility as the next more important thing? I think I'd put truth myself - and here we're talking about God's Truth, not your own - because to me, it's only God's Truth that will set you free. It's impossible to be set free by your own truth. You can only be set free through actually coming to experience and feel God's Truth. So that's the next important thing.

Obviously as many of you have pointed out, humility is so important in that process, and remember what the definition of humility is? In particular can you remember that it was the definition regarding emotion that we need to focus on? The willingness to feel every single thing you feel as it really is whether it feels good or bad. That is a part of humility but not the only parts of humility. Mary and I have done a five series interview called "Interview with Jesus - Humility", which is available on the Internet, about all of the different parts of humility. I would advise many of you to have a look at that again, if you haven't had a look at it already. What would you say are the next two most important things that you need for your relationship with God? Faith and will. So these are the things we discussed with you last time, in "Relationship with God - Faith & Prayer Session 4".

Now many of you have a false concept of your own condition. For a few of you the false concept is that you think your condition is worse than it actually is. But for the majority of us we actually think our condition is better than it actually is. Now what I would like to do is be honest about your condition because if you are not honest about your own condition of love, how is it that you'll ever develop a true desire to change? You need to know where you are before you can know where you're aiming. But also you need to know where you're aiming before you'll take any action.

So if we look at this issue of love, what are we aiming for? If we're on the Divine Love Path, if we're following this pathway that God has made to become at-one with God, what are we aiming for? It's quite obvious, isn't it? We're aiming for becoming at-one with God in love. What we're aiming for is becoming at-one with the way God loves.

2.1. God's Love is an emotion that comes only from God

Participant: I touched on your stuff about three years ago, the emanation - is that what you're talking about? So that we're emanating God's Love, so the energy that God is providing to the universe comes through us?

No it's not about the energy God's providing. So remember for most of the people here they would know that God actually provides lots of different forms of energy and love is one of those forms. And what I'm talking about here is in particular the feeling of love. God has feelings of love for all of God's Creations, including yourself, and that feeling of love can enter you and transform your soul to such an extent that you feel the way God loves, and you actually finish up loving the way God loves, with other people. But that's not energy, if you understand. [00:26:29.09]

Participant: It is a form of energy though.

It's a form of energy but if you focus it as energy what you're going to finish up doing every single time is going away from that it's a feeling of love. So most people find what they do is they talk about energy a lot but they forget that it's emotional - love is an emotion, it's not just energy; it's a feeling in motion. It's an emotion. So what I'm suggesting to people is don't get stuck on the energy side of things, focus on the feeling side of things because that's the emotions, that's the energy in motion.

Participant: It's still an energy though and it's God's Energy and it's emanating...

To be honest with you, if you've come here to argue with me...

Participant: No, no, no, I'm putting a point of view forward that might be different to yours.

And to be frank with you, this is my seminar and my points of view will come forward.

Participant: So shall I hold these to the break to be able to talk to...?

No, you can ask tomorrow. We'll have a whole question and answer session tomorrow where you can ask questions. Today I want to focus on the material I want to cover. It's a free seminar that I've paid for to share my opinion with you. And I'm telling you that's it's not my opinion actually, it's God's, but that's up to you whether you want to determine that or not. But, as I've spoken to many people before about, if you focus on the thought of energy, you are always going to get away from the real feelings of love. Energy is very, very different because there's all forms of energy, including your entire body, is a form of energy. But that's not necessarily love. [00:28:06.05]

Participant: So I can't say anything more until tomorrow?

You can ask questions tomorrow, if you want to ask questions about different subjects that get me off this subject that I want to discuss because you want to speak about your ideas about energy. I don't want to speak about your ideas about energy.

Participant: I'm just trying to have a conversation, that's all. But I'll leave it till tomorrow.

And I'm not here to have a conversation with you today.

Participant: I'll leave it till tomorrow.

Yep that's fine.

Participant: That's fine. I apologise if that's caused some disturbance.

No, no, it doesn't disturb me; I'm just saying I'm not going to do it with you. That's all. Anyone else have a question?

2.2. Becoming at-one with the way that God loves

Getting back to the five basics, this area of love is becoming at-one with the way God loves, the way God feels for everything, everything God has created. So it means becoming at-one with that. So in other words you will love in the same manner and way that God will love when you become at-one with God. That's the underlying goal. Now to do that, that means that you would love every single person here the way God loves. Now for the majority of us here, we don't want to do that. Not yet. You see there are certain people that you want to dislike. There are certain people you want to attack. There are certain people that you'd like to pull down. There are certain people that you'd like to just have a few cross words with and make them feel like they're the problem basically. That's what you want to achieve many times.

And becoming at-one with God is not about that, becoming at-one with God is about becoming at-one with the way in which God loves. Now for many of us, it gets to the point where we feel that the way God loves is not achievable. And for many of us we don't even believe God loves actually. For many of us what happens is that we believe that God's quite cruel or God doesn't engage us on a personal one-on-one level; that's what we believe. As a result of that, we are not at-one with the way God loves and we have no desire to be at-one with the way God loves. And it's only the desire to be at-one with the way God loves that causes us to want to be at-one with God. It's only the desire for the relationship with God that causes us to have that feeling that we would like to achieve that in our lifetime.

2.3. Becoming at-one with God's Absolute Truth

Now to do that we have to believe what God knows is the absolute truth. So our belief systems have to change. We must become at-one with God's Absolute Truth. This is where many of us have a terrible, terrible lack. We have little desire to become at-one with the way God sees ourselves. We want God to see us how we see ourselves. We don't want God to see us the way God actually does see us. We want to maintain a facade with the world in other words. And in maintaining a facade with the world, what we're doing is we are not being at-one with the way that God sees everything. We are trying to falsify ourselves to the universe around us. And most of the time we're even falsifying ourselves to ourselves. We're telling ourselves that we're actually more developed or more loving than we actually are. We're telling ourselves we're more truthful than we are.

What I notice a lot is the amount of resistance to truth. It is extreme for many of you still. When Mary and I go shopping in Kingaroy, which is where we shop, sometimes we come against some of you that we see from the audience. And we go to walk up to you and have a chat with you and then we go, "Whoa, that feeling coming from you," and that feeling is that feeling that you have of, "What's he going to say to me now?" Many of you know you've had that feeling. "What's he going to say to me now? What thing is he going to say that makes me feel like I'm... no I don't want to know." And what we feel from you is this wall of not engaging, not wanting to engage. Now of course we want to start to want to engage and we go, no that wall, okay, I'm okay with accepting your will to not engage and so we walk past and say, "Hello, how are you today?" And you go, "Hello." And you go, "Phew, got out of that." And that's the feeling that we feel from many of you - a feeling of relief that you didn't have to talk to us. Now many of you know that you've had that feeling frequently, and why is that feeling present? Because there is a definite resistance to hearing truth. [00:33:39.12]

So there's not a love of truth, there's not a desire to know new things that you don't currently know. You want to only hear the things you currently know and have them confirmed. You don't want to hear something new. But to become at-one with God you're going to have to hear lots of new things. And a lot of the new things you're going to have to hear are going to be completely the opposite and completely different than what the average person on Earth believes. And in addition to that it's going to be completely different to what your heart tells you is correct, many times. And you're going to have to give up things. Most of us don't want to. We want to have what we believe confirmed. We don't want to have what we believe challenged. And as a result of that we finish up in this state where we're not at-one with God's Truth.

We want our own truth to be true. It's almost like we're having an argument with God. We're basically saying to God, "Unless you change the whole universe to suit me, I don't want to have a relationship with you." And many of us believe in fact that God will do that because God loves and that's what we believe love would do. Many of us believe that love would make everyone around you conform to what you want. And in a minute I'm going to discuss these kinds of things with you in more detail as to how we go about that.

2.4. Desiring to feel every emotion

Let's look at the next thing – humility - the desire to feel everything, rather than blaming other people for your feelings, or God. And that's only just a part of humility. Like I said we can discuss humility, and we have done for I think about 12 or 15 hours. So there are a lot of parts involved in humility but that is one of the things that is very important to understand. Now for the majority of us, we don't have that desire, we only have that desire when the feelings are what we believe are going to able to be coped with.

So in other words our fear determines how humble we are. Most of us are afraid to go too far in any direction, in terms of how we feel, so what we do is we create constraints in our feelings and emotions that prevent us from feeling the way we truly feel on so many different subjects. And as a result we're not humble; we are governed by our fear. And our fear determines how much we're willing to accept. And because our fear determines how much we're willing to feel, our fear then determines how much we're willing to hear as truth. And our fear determines how loving we're going to become. And if our fear is high, then the amount of love that we're going to finish up having is going to be very low; because our fear will dictate how much love we can express.

Our fear will also dictate how much love we can receive. Many of us are not receiving love at all because we're so afraid of somebody loving us for lots of different emotional reasons, most of which involve the feelings that if somebody loves us they're trying to control us or they're trying to manipulate us and so forth. [00:37:39.08]

So this is a big problem for many, this problem of humility.

2.5. Faith that God is good and loves

Next we want to talk about faith. You remember in our previous presentations, such as "Relationship with God - Faith & Prayer", I've talked a little about faith and I've said that we need to have the kind of faith where we actually allow ourselves to believe that God is good. Many of us don't believe God is good.

For instance, many of you have learnt about the Law of Attraction. How do you feel about the Law of Attraction? When I have discussions with many of you about the Law of Attraction, I can feel from you that you actually hate the Law of Attraction. You think the Law of Attraction is a damn mess, particularly when it's imposed in your own life. And when the Law of Attraction happens, and different events get triggered, many of you still believe, that you want to try to get away from those events somehow, try to manoeuvre around these events.

For example, you see the number of somebody that you don't like very much ringing you on the phone, so what do you do? You decide to answer, or not answer and go to message bank \- which one is it most of the time when it's somebody you don't want to talk to? Isn't it message bank most of the time? And why is that? Why does that happen? Because we don't engage that as a Law of God - that we have attracted this conversation, to learn something and there's a law involved. And we don't have any faith in that. So what we do is we turn off, if you like, all of the chances God's giving us to grow. We turn them all off, we shut them all down, and this is what we do because we don't have faith that God is good and that God loves us and God wants to have a relationship. We don't have faith in those things.

2.6. Using will in harmony with God's Laws

And then lastly, one of the biggest problems we have is that we might believe all of these things are true intellectually, we might accept them all intellectually, but when it comes to exercising our will in harmony with these things, that's where we fall down. In other words we don't have a strong desire to truly be loving. We only have a desire to be loving as long as good things happen as a result. But something bad might happen as a result of us being loving, and by the way it is possible that something bad can happen from the result of us being loving because when other people are not in a loving space sometimes they view what you do in a loving space as unloving. And so they have a response to that. So often times what we're trying to do is we're trying to exercise our will in harmony with self-protection. We're not exercising our will in harmony with love or truth or humility or faith. Instead we're exercising our will in a way that we try to protect ourselves from what is going on, what is happening in our lives: protect ourselves from any - what we see as future harm. We often are exercising our will in that direction only and we will under those circumstances compromise: compromise truth, compromise humility, compromise love; and many of us on a day-to-day basis still compromise love; we still do that. [00:41:34.24]

So if we were truly wanting to put it all together, what we would do is we would exercise our will in harmony with God's Laws. That's what we would do. That's how we would exercise our will. We would not exercise our will out of harmony with God's Laws, whether we know intellectually they're God's Laws or emotionally. As soon as we know intellectually even, without us being aware emotionally, we would want to exercise our will in harmony with what we've learnt. We would not keep giving ourselves excuses.

For instance, one excuse that I hear from many of you is, "I'm not there yet." How many times have you used that one in your personal life? You go, "I know that I should do this but I'm not there yet. I'm not capable of doing that yet." And in particular we see that happening when it comes to telling the truth with other people. "I know I should tell my husband that I cheated on him ten years ago, but I'm not there yet." In other words I'm not in the state yet where I feel like I can be motivated to do that and take the consequences. That's really what we're saying. We're saying I'm not there yet because we're saying we know that God's Laws will all happen a certain way to correct our attitude and we don't really want to engage those laws in the direct manner, and so we try to make excuses for ourselves. That's what we do.

Now they're the primary parts of putting our relationship with God together: they're the primary parts. Now it's a very brief summary, of course we could discuss, and I have done for hours and hours on end, love and what love is and what love isn't and all of those different things. We've got whole seminars where we did whole days of what it means to love another person; whole days of what it means to receive Love from God; whole days of what God's Truth is. And in fact Mary and I will be presenting more information about God's Truth over the coming months. About what is God's Truth, what are the qualities of God's Truth, what are the attributes of God's Truth.

Mary and I have already done humility. Like I've said, we've done five sessions on humility, called "Interview with Jesus - Humility" and talked a lot about what that is, what it looks like, what it feels like, how it is. Remember we've just done a series of talks about faith and prayer called "Relationship with God - Faith & Prayer". And in those we defined faith and what it is and how we can integrate that into our relationship with God and so forth. We've also had many discussions with you about will, the exercise of your will in harmony with love, such as "The Human Soul - The Gift of Free Will". We've had many discussions about that. So my suggestion is if you want to know more about those particular things is to go to those discussions and listen to them again or watch them again because I don't want to so much discuss with you the intricacies of each thing today.

3. Soul progression by audience members

What I would like to discuss with you is the areas that are very obvious for this group of people, not the newer persons as I said, but the persons who have been listening for a fair portion of time. I want to discuss with you what's really going on for many of you in terms of your own progression. [00:45:04.10]

Now can I ask you a direct question? How many of you feel that in the time you've listened to the Divine Truth, you've actually progressed? Can you put up your hand, where you've actually progressed in love? Okay. So would that be the majority? I think so. Maybe I need to ask the opposite. How many of you feel you haven't progressed at all? Just a few of you, okay. So the majority feel you have progressed at least in some way. Okay. How many of you feel that progression is relatively easy? No one feels that. Okay. And how many of you feel, that you are sort of what you would classify, as struggling with it still? How many of you feel you are sort of struggling with it all still. Okay, so the majority again. How many of you feel like it is a breeze, everything is going smoothly, you don't have to worry. No? No one is in that category, okay. How many of you believe that things are going well but sometimes there is a suspicion that they are not going as well as what you would hope. How many of you feel that way? Just a few, okay. No worries.

Well let's look at what is really going on for the group of people who are here. Can I do that? Because I know a lot of you now. How many of you come along to sessions now for five years? There's quite a few of you who are five years. Four years? So now we're talking more than half. Three years? If you keep your hands up, now we're almost talking the majority who are here. Two years? So pretty much aside from a few, there are a lot of you two years at least.

Okay so do you feel that the progression you've made in the time that you've listened to the Divine Truth matches what you believed you would be able to achieve at the beginning of the time you heard about it? (Laughter) How many of you feel that? How many feel that the progression that you have achieved has matched what you believed you would achieve? Okay, just a few.

And to be honest with you, there's good reasons for that because a lot of times at the beginning we have all these concepts that our lives are a certain way, that we have certain influences around us and then through the process of emotional discovery we realise that a lot of things are not what we thought. We realise we're under a lot more spirit influence than we actually thought we were. We realise that we have a lot more addictions than we believed we had in the beginning. We thought that we were a lot more loving, but really when you put us under pressure we're not that loving at all and you find out a lot of things about yourself in the process and so of course what you believed about yourself at the beginning is often very different to what you currently believe about yourself.

So how many of you now believe very different things about yourself than you believed when you first started? Okay, so everyone. And that's what you would expect, isn't it? If God were bringing you towards some truth, there'd be some progress there. [00:48:27.03]

But the big problems that we have are not related to what we know, are they? The big problems we have are what we don't know; that's the big problems we have. And there are many issues that we face, personally, that we would like to ignore. And for many of us we do want to ignore them.

Mary: I just wanted to ask if you could explain why the big problem is the things that we don't know as opposed to the things that we do.

Well with the things that we do know, there is at least a consciousness, even from an intellectual perspective, at some level of consciousness that there is a problem in that particular area. But the things we don't know at all, there is neither an intellectual consciousness nor an emotional awareness that it is a problem.

3.1. An example of single women in the audience

So if I can give some examples. Many of you ladies are single, are you not? Can I just have a show of hands of all the people who are single in the audience? So okay, in fact, the majority. Now how many of you are ladies? So okay, the majority of the single people in our audience are in fact women. And yet there is a fairly even mix of men and women in the audience today. But the majority of single people are women. Now do you know why the majority of you believe you are single? Because I can tell you why and if you are honest with yourself you'll be able to feel why.

Participant: I like to be in control and I like to believe my mythology and I am terrified.

So you want a partner who you can control.

Participant: I would prefer probably someone who'd just do everything I said and fall into line.

Well good luck with that. I don't think that's going to happen.

Participant: That's why I'm with no one.

Yeah. But see this is where we have got to be honest with ourselves that that is what we want you see. It is important to be honest, so please don't think I'm making fun about the honesty, because the honesty is very important. It's very important for us to see the real reason of what's going on. So you go, okay, I want control. So is control love? No, so basically what we're saying is we don't want to love, we want control. And what's the internal justification that you can feel for that? What's the feeling inside of you that causes you to feel that control is good?

Participant: Well I feel it is fear driven.

Okay so there's fears inside of you that makes you feel that control is good and because you want control you can't love. And honestly it's highly unlikely as well that you will attract the other half of yourself because they're going to go, "Do I want to be controlled? Probably not." And so they're not going to be attracted basically just from that feeling that's coming from you as an individual. So we know that's a problem. How long have you known that's a problem? [00:52:07.26]

Participant: I haven't been with anyone for twenty years and I think I'm terrified.

Okay, so you've known it's a problem way before you even met me. You've known this is a problem and nothing's changed on that front. So what would that tell you?

Participant: That I'm in error and I need to shift.

But isn't it really telling you that you don't want to shift?

Participant: Yes.

Because if you wanted to shift, of course the shift would occur. So this is telling us where we - let's call it stubborn, shall we?

Participant: Yes. I'm choosing to let my fear rule this.

No see that's the excuse, you see - that's the excuse and this is where we go.

3.2. Placing fear as our god

See this is what happens when fear rules. You're saying, "I'm choosing to let my fear rule", but that's just an excuse because the reality is if your desire, your will was being exercised in harmony with love, you would ignore your fear, even if you had it. You would ignore it, you wouldn't listen to it. You wouldn't do what it dictates. You would choose instead to do something that you know to be right.

So for example, if you know that when you control, or if you want to control a potential partner, you're not going to get very many potential applicants. If you know that for certain, then surely the most logical thing to do would be to use your will in a different direction. In other words, stop controlling, stop wanting to control. And then of course all your fears would come up and if you were truly humble, you would feel them. You wouldn't hold on to them and you wouldn't say, "I'm using my fear to determine my course of action." Because why would anybody want to use their fear to determine their course of action? It makes no logical sense to use your fear when you know your fear is not actually God's Truth, it's just what you believe to be true.

And so what I'm suggesting is that a lot of times we use these excuses like, "I'm terrified". That's an excuse to not have a relationship. It's not a valid excuse. It's an excuse we want to use and the reason why we want to use it is because we don't want to love, and we don't have a strong enough will and we don't have a strong enough faith that things are going to be different. We believe that every time we engage a new relationship that eventually they're going to either want to control us or I want to control them because they'll do things that might stress me out, may make me feel certain things that I don't want to feel. Well that's a lack of humility because if you just let yourself feel everything, then you wouldn't be worried about that. [00:54:50.08]

So we start seeing these problems that we face are surrounding fear, which many times they are, but what happens is we do this with our fear, and I've told many of you this many times - we make our fear God and everything else comes behind our fear.

So we like the idea of love and we like the idea of truth and we like the idea of becoming humble and we like the idea of having a strong faith in God and in the positive parts of the universe, and we like the idea of using our will with desire and passion and having an expressive life. We like all of those ideas and concepts. But what we have done is we've placed our fear as our God and as soon as we place our fear as our God, all those ideas go out the window the moment our fear is triggered.

The moment our fear starts to come up all we do from that point on is try to suppress it. We're not interested in using our will in harmony with love anymore, we're not interested in the truth anymore, we're not interested in being loving with our brothers and sisters, our friends, the world, animals - all these other things. We're not interested in loving all of those things; we're not interested in trying to maintain a concept that actually God is good. We're not interested in any of those things anymore because our fear is God, and fear is not a good God, we know that. But we feel that we must conform to it every single time. And in making fear our God we are ignoring all of these things in that moment.

3.3. Percentages of the audience who have progressed

So the reason why I asked this question about relationships is this. If I had to break up the whole audience in terms of condition of what's really going on inside, I'd need to break up the women from the men, because it's different for the women than the men generally in the audience. But if we look at the general condition of the majority of us, fifty percent of us still have no idea what it means to practice Divine Truth, and I'm talking about fifty percent who have listened for three to five years still really have no idea. Around forty percent have an idea and have made some progress, but their progress has now either stagnated, or become very frustrating, or has been dictated to by their fear. In other words they've only progressed on the issues that you're not so afraid of. And for the issues that you're terrified of, there's been little or no progress in those areas.

And then around ten percent \- so there'd probably be close to one hundred and fifty people here today, so we're talking about fifteen of you - actually do understand what it means to connect emotionally to God and connect emotionally to your emotions and so forth, and actually have made continual progress, and have also started to get beyond your fear. In other words your fear no longer dictates your action, which is something that's been a major change in your life. But there are only around fifteen people in the audience who do that actually, where their fear no longer dictates their actions, or the majority of their actions. There's still fear for all of you that dictate your actions in some cases, but there's around fifteen of us in the audience that actually no longer let themselves be ruled by their fear. So that means in one hundred and fifty people there are basically one hundred and thirty five people who still let their fear dictate everything. [00:59:09.28]

That's why in 2009 and 2010 I gave a whole series of talks about fear. I even did a "Fear Revisited". You remember that? Going back to try and get people to deal with their fears. The reason why is because fear is a major limiting factor on your life. As soon as the fear is triggered, what is happening for the majority of you is you throw away love, you throw away truth, you throw away humility, you throw away faith and you use your will to look after your fear, which is your God.

Many of you have made some progress - I feel there are at least fifty percent of you that have made some progress that I see. When I'm measuring progress I'm not measuring it from the point of view that you lived here and then you moved there because that to me is a sideways shift - you're still on the Earth, it's a sideways shift; and I don't mean that you now have a different job, well that's just a sideways shift. I mean that you've actually become more loving and it's observable to other people. Other people feel you are more loving than you were when you began. Now for many of you, other people feel you are no different than you were five years ago. For some of you other people feel that you are actually worse than you were five years ago, in terms of love; and that can happen because when all of our fears get triggered, what do we have a tendency to do if fear is our god? We start acting in all of our fears and we become more unloving automatically as soon as we act upon our fears.

So what I'm going to do now is break it up into men and women, and what's going on in terms of what's going on for the genders generally in the audience currently. So this doesn't always apply to everybody who's listening to this talk, but rather just the audience currently. Before I do that, what I'd like to do is just talk to you a little about fear and truth.

4. Truth exposes fear

I don't know but do you notice that fear is a bit like ice. Do you notice that? It's like it feels so immovable and so constraining that it feels like you can't do anything else but act in harmony with the fear. That's what it feels like. So let's draw it as a block of ice. Now I often liken truth to water, so let's say that block of ice is floating in some water. Where would the water level be on the ice under normal circumstances, if we're talking from a scientific perspective? Is it 2/3's? 1/8, 7/8's? How much does H2O expand when it gets cold? Well let's draw it at about one eighth. [01:02:38.04]

So if fear is a block of ice and the water is truth, can you see that truth has only exposed a certain amount of your fear at this point in time only? You've only become conscious of this fear that is above the water line of the block of ice. Already for many of you that's too much. But it's your fear that prevents most of the engagement of all of the principles of putting it altogether with your relationship with God.

Using an analogy of fear being ice floating in water of truth, we are only aware of the fear in us that is above the water line and has been exposed by truth

It's mostly the refusal to do these things - love, truth, humility, faith and will, which is only dictated to you by your fear - that causes you to stop doing these things, which means that you can no longer put it all together and it means that your relationship with God is affected: and this part of the ice that is above the water line is the only part of your fear that you've allowed yourself to expose. So above the water line is the fear that you could say you were aware of; that's what you're aware of. Below the water line is all of the fear that's inside of you that you're completely unaware of. Now who is frightened about that concept? So we're frightened about a concept that explains where we are about fear: and often we are afraid of what we're actually seeing.

So for pretty much all of us this is how our life is until we engage more truth. When we engage more truth, it's like draining the cup of water. So imagine this ice and water is in a cup, so let's put it inside of a cup. Now if you have more truth, it's like tipping out that water level so the water level reduces. So if the water level reduces what happens? The more truth that happens, the more fear is exposed. Is that not true? Isn't that what happens when we start processing through issues of truth in our day-to-day life? We get more afraid, generally. That's what happens. [01:05:07.15]

Tipping out the water, by receiving more truth, exposes more fear

5. Major areas of avoidance of fear

Now for most of us we have what I would call a fear tolerance level. Do you notice your fear tolerance level in the course of a day? Most of us have a fear tolerance level. To be frank most of your fear tolerance levels are so strong that you're in complete denial that you have any fear at all on certain issues. That's how strong your fear tolerance level is. In other words your fear tolerance level is so low that you will not allow yourself to be conscious of any fear that you actually have on certain issues.

And in particular there are two issues that are primarily affected by these choices and decisions that you are making collectively. One issue is this - the issue of your relationship with God; your belief systems about God that you do not wish to confront. The second one is your relationship with the other half of yourself, your soulmate. Remember that's the other half of yourself. And the third issue is yourself, which is your own soul. These are the three biggest avoidances that you have inside of yourself about truth.

So when somebody comes along and talks to you about some kind of external truth, you go, "No worries, I can accept that, that sounds really good, it's a great concept, a great idea. I'm so fascinated about that area of study." But when somebody comes along and says, "Do you know that you are quite a nasty woman actually?" And if you're a woman, not a man, you'll probably feel that as an attack on you, even though it might be true. You might be quite a nasty woman, actually: but you feel it as an attack and so what you do is you don't want to become conscious of that because you're afraid that you are in the end. And so what you do is you rub out of your life any awareness of your own self.

5.1. Beliefs surrounding relationships

Then when it comes to being single versus being in a relationship, many of us do not wish to examine why we are single. We believe the main reason why we are single is because there are no good men out there or no good women out there. We believe that it's other people that are the problem; that's what we believe. And if we are honest with ourselves the majority of us who are single do believe that the problem is there are no good people to find - we do believe these things. And why do we believe these things? Because we've got a lot of fear about this relationship that we don't want to address; we don't want to expose; we don't want the fear to be heightened; and so what we do is we deny all truth about it: and the being we do that the most with is God. That's the reality.

5.2. Beliefs surrounding having a relationship with God and how we treat God's Creations

Many of you believe that a relationship with God is possible without having love for your fellow man or for the other half of yourself or for yourself. So many of us believe that a relationship with God is possible even though we don't like ourselves, even though we have a problem with the opposite gender or the same gender, depending on what kind of an attraction it is. So shall we call it we have a problem with our soulmate attraction. And even though we treat others, who are neither of the first two things - ourselves or our soulmate - badly, we believe that a relationship with God is possible, while we treat other people badly. And a relationship with God is not ever going to be possible while we treat other people badly, ever. [01:09:18.04]

So of course there's degrees of how we treat people. So if we treat other people badly half the time, then half the time we might be able to have a relationship with God because the other half the time we're treating other people well and so therefore in that interaction we can actually have some kind of relationship with God. If we want to become at-one with God, which is being connected with God all of the time, then we must have love for every single one of those people; ourselves, the other half of ourselves, and any other person.

But if we really want to become at-one with God we're not only going to have to have love for that we're also going to have to have love for all of God's Living Creations, and also love and respect for all of the inanimate creations and how we deal with all of them.

So in other words at some point in time we're going to have to love our physical body. So if we're there still drinking alcohol, which is killing brain cells in our physical body, you can't really say in that place that you love yourself. If you're still getting angry with your partner all the time you can't really say you love your partner. If you're still projecting at other people that they're not as good as you or they're worse than you are or you're condescending towards them, even just slightly feeling frustrated with them, then you're not loving them. They're allowed to exercise their own will - so this is a part of not loving people.

If we're using animals and other creatures for our own benefit and we're willing to destroy their life in order to have that occur, then we're not even loving them; and if we're willing to manipulate animals in order to get things from them, we're not loving them either.

So there are a lot of areas where we're not loving under those circumstances. And we can't expect to have a relationship with God while we're doing all those things, because God created all those things. You, your soulmate, others, their soulmates, all other living creatures - everything was created by God. You can't expect to have a loving relationship with God while we're being unloving with all those things. And we're never going to be loving with all those things while our fear is the most dominant thing in our life. Because whenever compromise is put in our face, where we have to compromise what we're doing or love, if we honour fear we will always do what fear dictates: we won't love; we'll always do what the fear wants.

5.3. Increasing awareness of fear through truth

The fear has become our god for the majority of us, and the only thing that's going to reduce that and improve our awareness of our own fear is truth. And what do the majority of us feel about truth? We feel, "Just give us enough." Isn't that how you feel most of the time? Don't give me too much, just give me enough. Mary and I are often finding now that people ask us to spend a bit of time with them or whatever, and they want to ask us some personal questions, which we generally don't do that much of anymore, but they want to ask us personal questions and we say to them, "Are you ready to know the truth?" And they say, "Yes." And you start a conversation and ten minutes in, there's no willingness to know the truth generally at all because everyone has a fear threshold that's usually quite small in fact. Most people are not willing to be challenged in any way with regard to their fears. [01:13:07.10]

And so because their fear threshold is very small you're only ever going to get to know a little bit of truth. So it's going to be like dribble, dribble, dribble, dribble, dribble type of progress. Now there's a good chance if let's say you started progressing towards God when you were forty or fifty, and you decide to dribble the progress, then you're definitely going to die before you're at-one with God, if you decide to dribble it. It's like drip, drip, drip, drip, drip. Eventually the glass will get full but only after many millions of drips. Is that what you want? And while that's all happening of course, there are external pressures on you, trying to get you to conform to old ways of living, to old ways of belief systems and everything, all these pressures going on. Sooner or later you probably want to conform because your fear will dictate that you do.

So this problem with fear is a huge problem for many of you still. Many of you are completely unaware of what you're afraid of, which is the biggest problem, because if you're unaware of it, you're never going to feel it. And the only way you can let go of fear is by feeling it. You can't let go of it any other way. It's the same with grief; the only way you can let go of grief is by feeling it. The only way you can let go of anger is by feeling it. The only way you can let go of your addictions is by feeling them. That's the only way you're ever going to let go of anything - by feeling it. And if you're unwilling to feel the fear, the grief, the anger, the addictions, then progression is not possible. And you can hear a lot of things that you agree with, but you won't have progressed. You'll be the same as you were years ago.

5.4. Dealing with not wanting to know ourselves

Participant: AJ, I'm sitting in that area of unawareness of the fear and not wanting to go there so would the best way to start be to ask God to show me my true self. Would the fear be revealed in that?

Most of us don't want to know our true selves. So where's the best way to start?

Participant: Being honest.

And just saying to yourself, "I don't want to know my true self." And then what would you do if you were really wanting to progress? You'd say, "I don't want to know my true self, obviously I'm going to have to know my true self sooner or later," what would you do next?

Participant: Well I'd try to engage a relationship with God so I can...

A relationship with God won't be possible while you don't want to know yourself. So what's the point in trying to have a relationship with God when you don't want to know yourself? See what I would do is this. If I'd worked out that I don't want to know me, really what you're saying is you don't want yourself, you don't want to be yourself, you don't want to know yourself, you don't want yourself. This is a common problem for many people - you don't want yourself. If I felt that and I knew that to be true, my very next course of action would be to go, "Okay, I know that the only way I can change is by feeling - humility tells me that. The only way I'm going to change on this belief is by feeling it." [01:16:36.25]

Participant: Feeling that I don't want to know myself?

Yes. Feeling you don't want to know yourself. And then you feel you don't want to know yourself, you will then feel why. That will be the subsequent result of feeling that you don't want to know yourself. You will then feel why you don't want to know yourself.

Participant: So the 'why' will not become before the feeling initially?

No. See many of you are trying to put the 'why' before the feeling. You do it all the time. And I keep saying to you there is a feeling above a feeling, not a thought. Many of you still are trying to have thoughts before you have feelings. So what you do is you go, "Okay I know I'm not progressing, I know I'm not doing this, I know I'm not doing that, I wonder why that is?" And you use your mind and you're trying to work out why. No, no, stop, just stop all of that. Feel that you don't want to know. Feel it. How much you don't want to know about yourself - feel that. Feel how angry you are about having to know yourself. Feel those feelings.

5.4.1. An example of wanting control

Participant: Well I think the first step for me is not wanting to know myself, is that I'd have to let go of my control to know myself, first wouldn't I?

So feel your control. Feel your control. Sit down with your control every day and notice every single time you try to control. Feel it. Feel the level of your control. That's feeling your addiction. Feel your addiction. Feel the level of control. Feel how much you want to control and when you feel it you'll work out why you want to control. You won't work it out intellectually because the feelings will just come up. "Oh I want to control because every time I don't get to control I'm...." you know, you work out that you're trying to avoid some emotion. It might be only one emotion you're trying to avoid. And you'll work it out because you've felt that you want control.

Many of you don't even realise that you want control. I'm putting to you that every single one of you who are single in the audience today, unless you're under twenty-five, wants control. That's one of the reasons why you're not with a partner is because you want control. Many of you who are with a partner today still want control, and you've got a partner you can control. It took many years to find him or her, and now you've got him or her you're not going to let him go because you want control. They are your ideal partner because they are the person that gives you everything that you want. Many of us are not willing to see that. We're not willing to see that. We're not willing to see what's going on inside of ourselves in reality. [01:19:24.19]

5.4.2. An example of single women in the audience (continued)

So how many of you are ladies who are single? Just out of interest. So probably forty percent of the audience, maybe. That's a lot in a percentage, isn't it, forty percent of the audience. Have you ever given consideration to the fact that you are not very pleasant to live with? Have you given consideration to that? Okay, what do you want to do about it? You see, at the moment you're letting your fear dictate that. The reason why you've become unpleasant to live with is because of your fear. It's only because of your fear. It's the things you're afraid of facing inside of yourself, feelings you're afraid of having inside of yourself that would cause that to occur. Feel that. Feel that. Allow yourself to feel it because when you feel it you'll realise why. When you realise why, you can change. But you're not going to change until you realise why.

5.4.3. Feeling how much we don't want to know ourselves

You see feel what you currently don't want. See many people have asked me this question, "Maybe I should just develop my relationship with God more?" Well you can't develop a relationship with God when you don't want to know yourself. And you don't want to be truly honest with God about yourself. So from God's Perspective, God will feel far closer to you if you honour the fact that you don't want yourself. You don't want to feel yourself and you feel how much you don't want to. In that moment you'll be closer to God than you've ever been before actually. You don't have to do anything else other than feel that, in that moment.

But what I see most of you trying to do is you're trying to work out what's going on before you feel. Your feeling of fear will stop you from even working it out. You need to feel your fear first and let go of some of the fear and then you'll work it out. But many of you want to know before you feel. Is that not a problem for the majority of us in fact; we want to know things before we feel them. Because we want to know that we're not crazy, we're not stupid, that it's a real feeling, that we've justified having the feeling. We even go to other people, "You see I have this feeling because..." Who cares why you have the feeling? Just feel it. [01:22:03.16]

Many of you still get involved in this discussion. "How have you felt this week?" "I felt this and I realised it's because of this and because of that and because of this that I feel that. Well what about yourself?" "Oh yes I had this happen and I had this thing come up and I realised it's because of this." What's going on? What are you doing this for? It's a waste of time because you're not feeling it. If you felt it truly, you wouldn't need to do it in fact. You wouldn't even need to discuss it with another person if you felt it truly. You would just feel it.

We are addicted to having other people be involved in our own emotional work. We are addicted because we want certain things from them. We want them to make us feel safe; we want to know because if someone else is going through it then it means that my feeling is valid. We want to know that because someone else is experiencing a similar thing or they've had an emotion this week that that means I'm allowed to have one too. And it's all just rubbish actually. It's all just our fear dictating our further progress.

And what are the fears? They are the fears you don't see. The fear of other people's approval, the fear of not having any acceptance, the fear of not having other people like you, the fear that other people don't agree with you and you're the only person on the planet who actually feels that particular thing. The fear that you're stupid, that you're strange, that you're crazy, that you're weird, all of these fears are the fears that you try to make go away by having somebody else come along and have a chat with them about your feelings. So you're actually in addiction dealing with your emotion. Now can you really ever deal with an emotion while you're in an addiction? Of course you can't. You're only going to be dealing with the emotion that you're fear is allowing you to deal with.

6. Our fear creates a prison of our own making

So for many I feel what's going on is this; our fear has become like a prison of our own making. This is what it's like; we've got this prison and our fear by the way dictates how big the prison is. So the less fear we have, the bigger the prison is, in other words we have more freedom. The more fear we have, the smaller the prison is. In other words it's like a solitary confinement cell when our fear is very, very large. And we have stuck ourselves inside of this. We are constrained by this prison that we have created, that our fear dictates. [01:24:51.27]

And while that remains the case, even when you discover Divine Truth and you discover the way to God through emotional change, you will find that you will only allow yourself to experience emotions that the boundaries of your fear will accept. So if your fear is very large, your cell will be very small and the boundaries of what your fear will allow you too actually process emotionally will be very small, very tight. You'll only be able to get into certain things emotionally and work your way through them, within that boundary. If your fear is less than that, then your boundaries might be larger but you still have boundaries.

Fear creates a virtual prison in our lives

And everything outside of this boundary is the real stuff that's going to help your relationship with God. Feeling that is going to help your relationship with God the most. Feeling the area inside the prison, will only let you have a relationship with God that's constrained by exactly the same boundaries. That's all it's going to do. Your whole life, for the rest of your life, will be dictated to by what your fear will allow you to experience. And unless that changes, unless something changes, where your fear and what it allows you to experience grows, nothing will change in your life.

What I see many of you doing is you allow certain emotions, so that might be an emotion of grief, where you cry that much to that boundary. And that might be the direction of your grief, you can cry to that boundary.

Our prison of fear constrains how much grief we can feel

You will cry no more because your fear is telling you to stop and you honour your fear before you honour anything else. You don't honour God there, you don't honour love, you don't honour faith, you don't honour humility, you don't want more truth in that place, you only will allow yourself to experience grief to that point. That's it.

Some of you will only allow yourself to experience grief if it's a spirit with you. In other words, you're experiencing the grief of spirits who are attracted to you or are attached to you before you will let yourself feel any of your own grief. So for many of you, all of the crying that you've ever done wasn't yours. That seems to be a waste; and the reason why you do that is because your fear will only let you do that. It's your fear, you want somebody to be with you all the time when you experience an emotion, and if it's not a person you'd prefer it to be a spirit person. So you let yourself process that way.

Some of you are in complete denial of this level of control that you have over your lives with your fear.

Putting It All Together: Part 2

7. Developing a desire to feel childhood fear as an adult

Participant: I can only honestly say that I've touched on my childhood fear a couple of times in five years, when the prison came down just a little bit, and those times were so terrifying, the fear... bodily experiencing the fear itself, that I haven't been willing to go there.

Yeah, I agree.

Participant: So the question is, the adult side of me that builds the prison is really very justified. I justify it.

You do.

Participant: Because when I feel that childhood fear, it's like rationally I tell myself I get a little slice of it...

So really what you're saying...

Participant: More fear, I'm terrified of that actual loss of control.

Yes, you are terrified of being overwhelmed.

Participant: I'm not sure what the question is, it is just that it's very scary.

There hasn't been a question yet. Can you ask one? So what are you asking really? What's the thing you'd like to ask?

Participant: That my adult self feels very justified to build that big brick wall and isolate myself from... so what do you do with that?

Can I ask you a question? What are you going to do about that? Because no change is possible without you doing something about it.

Participant: But that childhood fear is hideous.

Yes, I agree. Whenever a person's been abused as a child there are going to be terrible feelings involved.

Participant: What do I want to do about it? Well I could answer you and say I want to change it, but that's a lie.

That's correct; it is a lie at the moment, that's why things haven't changed. You see this is what I see happening constantly. Things have happened to us, some of the things that have happened to us weren't under our own control at the time. Particularly if the things that happened to us were when we were a child and were very damaging things; they weren't under our control at the time. We had certain feelings associated with that as a child.

But we are now an adult. We have control over what goes on in this system. This is our internal system, we have control of it. Your adult is going, "I justify keeping this prison." Now for as long as you justify keeping the prison, you will keep it. So you could stay in this state of keeping this prison, in a state of anger really it is if you think about it, and you're not even feeling it as anger yet. You're not feeling how angry you are with God and with the universe and everything and that God is expecting you to actually go through these emotions. [00:03:58.04]

Of course God's saying, "I will help you go through everything," but you don't really believe that. You don't have faith in that; you believe it's all just going to have to be you alone. And you have no faith that after you've gone through that, that you'll be free. You don't have any faith in that either. This is why you've established the prison. You see the prison not as a prison; you see it as your protective walls against the world. And that's a great way of staying in a prison; if you don't believe it's a prison anymore, and you believe it's actually your fortress instead, of course there's a higher likelihood you'll stay in it.

So as the adult, you see this as your fortress, not your prison. So you're already seeing things in a flawed manner, it's your prison, it's controlling most of your life; it's controlling your relationships, it's controlling your soulmate relationship, it's controlling your relationship with God, it controls what's happening to your body even, in terms of physically what's happening with your body. They are all controlled by this and you're unwilling to let it go because the adult is saying, "The child is justified, I'm justified holding on to this prison. I am justified having all these protective barriers up. I'm justified having all this fear, it makes sense for me to have all this fear and keep it inside of me."

Participant: It just feels like that childhood fear is bigger.

How can it be bigger, logically? How can it be bigger than you are yourself right now? It can't logically be bigger. It's an emotion that entered you as a child. As an adult you now have the ability to release it. You now have the choice and you are exercising your choice, your will, and by the way you're not alone, the majority of people in the audience are exercising their will in their choice to maintain in this adult state of anger, saying, "That's where I want to be, I don't want to be any different to that. And the fact that God expects me to let go of stuff that I feel is too big for me to feel."

God's saying, "No, no, no, with me everything is possible. You can feel anything with me." That's what God's saying but you don't trust that yet. And because you don't trust that and have faith in that you don't want to exercise your will in the direction of release. And because you don't exercise your will in the direction of release, you spent five years complaining about what's happened in your life in the past, and not changing. And the only person who has the most pain from that is you. Can you see? By not releasing, the only person who retains the pain is yourself. Of course you impose this pain upon others, so you actually cause pain for others during that place as well, but the person in the largest amount of pain for not dealing with something inside of yourself, is yourself. That's the reality. And the majority of us don't want to hear that. The majority of us want to hear that there's got to be another way. You feel at the moment that God should make some other way for you to become at-one with God other than you having to feel you.

7.1. Fear must be felt to grow towards God

Participant: I was just thinking that as you were talking. There has to be another way.

"There has to be another way". And in fact many of you have actually spent the last five years trying to find another way, more than you've spent trying to practice the basics to lead you this way. You've spent most of your time trying to find an alternative. Of course every alternative doesn't make any logical sense; it's not truthful, it's not emotional in its way so it doesn't have any effect in the long run, and eventually you come around to think, "Yeah maybe there is only one way." But when a person is told there is only one way to God initially, they go, "No, that's not the case. There's got to be millions of ways to God. There's got to be infinite ways to God." And I'm saying, "No, no, I'm sorry, there's only one way to God that God actually created." And that way is going to mean experiencing yourself. And that means experiencing every single thing inside of you. That means that God created you with the capacity and ability to feel everything that's happened to you in the past, no matter how traumatic and how bad it's been. [00:08:14.21]

7.2. False beliefs surrounding feeling fear

Participant: When I'm in that childhood fear I don't have that ability to trust.

No see I would suggest to you that when you're in the childhood fear truly, you will trust implicitly. You're not in the childhood fear yet, you've got the adult constantly monitoring how big the fear is getting, and in your case it's terror that you need to experience. So you've got terror to experience, and the adult is maintaining the boundary. So the adult you is saying to the child you, if you like, "You are only allowed to feel your terror until I get freaked out." And the child wants to let go of all of its terror and the adult is saying, "No, you can only let go of the terror until I (the adult) get freaked out, till it's too much for me." So it's actually the adult that's got the problem, not the child. The child wants to let it all go.

If you look at your own children, and any of you who have got children know that if you let your child cry, it will get to a point where it finishes. And a lot of times if you control the child's crying it goes longer than when the child was just let to cry by itself. That's the reality. Now I've had two children, I know what I'm talking about when it comes to those kinds of issues. What happens as an adult is we want to control the child, not because the child's going through a bad experience, because often the child doesn't feel it is, it's because we are going to get triggered by the child's experience and we try to shut down the child. The whole reason why most of the time we can't cope with a child crying is because we don't want to cry. The adult doesn't want to.

Now if you apply that to yourself, you will see that your child has lots of different emotions to feel. Some anger, terror, fear, grief and the big one that many people avoid, shame. The child has a lot of emotions it wants to feel but the adult goes, "You can only feel that in amongst the boundary I create for you." Beyond that boundary you're afraid of what? Going crazy. Are you not? Going crazy, always being there.

The adult maintains the boundary around the emotions the inner child needs to feel because it is afraid of going crazy and other issues

What would you call that when you feel like you're going to always stay in a certain emotion? You have a false belief, for many of us that if we start crying, we'll never finish.

Participant: The fear of craziness is definite and mental illness.

But even bigger for you is your fear of your own shame.

Participant: Yep.

You know, your father blamed you for his abuse of you and you've now taken that on and you now believe that you must have somehow asked for this abuse to occur. And the feeling of that shame is so great, that you, adult you, wants to prevent it. So it creates a boundary. The adult you creates the boundaries, not the child - the child wants to feel. The child always wanted to feel. It's only the adults around us, our parents initially, our environment, but then eventually ourselves; right now it's ourselves for the majority of us who create the boundaries that allow what we'll experience, and we are locked into that; and we're not willing to stretch that, we're not willing to go beyond the boundaries, we're afraid of being this terrible word, overwhelmed. We want to be whelmed, if there is such a word. (Laughter) [00:12:18.28]

Resistance to feeling the above emotions are common blockages to feeling fear

In other words, we want there to be a limit to what happens, we don't want to go beyond what we believe is our own personal limit. Now God created you without limits. God created you with the ability to expand your limitations infinitely in fact. That's why Divine Love transforms the soul as it's received in such a way as to making it more infinite in its nature to experience and expand. That can only happen by this overwhelming part. But we don't want to go there, the adult wants control. The adult wants to avoid the fear; the adult wants to have God as its fear. And the adult generally forgets that God is God and instead believes their fear is god. And as a result they place these boundaries on every emotion and so you'll only experience the emotion up until the point of the boundary.

We make fear our god when we choose not to feel it

The majority of you are facing this problem; the reason why we are stagnant in our progression in our relationship with God is because we are placing limitations upon the expressions of our emotions. That's what we're doing, constantly. And we're doing that because we believe we can't cope with anything more. We don't have any trust in God, we don't have any faith that God will be with us while we go through our emotional state, while we process through it and come out the other side.

A person who does that will never process through terror, will never process through fear, will never process through their own grief, and will never process even through their anger - that's the limitation of doing it. You will never process through it to the point of completion. And this is one reason why many abuse survivors, for example, spend years and years and years going to psychotherapy and yet still never getting it all out of themselves.

7.2.1. An example of childhood abuse

I used to attend a meeting of what was called adult survivors of childhood abuse, and I went to those meetings for five years. What I found was that the story they told me when I arrived at the meeting was the same story they were telling people five years later who arrived at the meeting for the first time. In other words for five years they had been going to see psychotherapists, visiting this meeting, talking about their abuse and yet still the abuse was as raw as it was the day that I had met them. And how did that occur? It occurred because they had placed limitations on their experience. That's the addiction and if we place limitations on our experience we will never get to the bottom of anything. We'll never get to the bottom of anything.

And while it's great for you, Jenn, to see that that is the case, the real question is how long do you want this to last? That is the real question. Because to be frank with you, there are people in the spirit world now who have been there for a thousand years, and they have wanted it to last for a thousand years. They are unwilling to face the abuse of their own childhood while they lived on Earth, from a thousand years ago. It is just as raw today for them as it was a thousand years ago when it occurred. Do you want that? Do you want to change that? Because the only way to change that is by changing this adult's beliefs. Not the child - the child will be fine, the child's going to be under God's Wing, working her way through every emotion. The adult is the problem. The adult is the one who wants to control the process. [00:16:38.05]

7.3. Valuing fear blocks the five basics required to grow towards God

And the problem is we're in this place, in the prison, we're willing to throw away love, we're willing to throw away truth, we're willing to throw away humility, we're willing to throw away faith, we're willing to even throw away our own will power just to maintain this structure, which does not bring us any happiness. It's going to keep us in the same place we are today and in ten year's time, fifty year's time, a hundred year's time, two hundred year's time, a thousand year's time, unless we change, we will be that person for that time.

And this is where it all gets down doesn't it really to this wonderful quality - humility. Because without humility, change is not possible. Humility allows you to experience something beyond which you feel you're capable of experiencing, but which God knows you are fully capable of experiencing.

7.4. Working through fear with or without God's Assistance

Participant: I'm just wondering is it ever possible really for anyone to get through terror without God?

I don't believe it's possible without God; however there are many people who are in the sixth dimension of the spirit world who believe they have released most of their terror without God.

Participant: So I was going to ask actually, do they have those fears in them?

Well, they have one primary fear still, which is a fear of having a relationship with God. So they still haven't released all their terror, but they've often released quite a lot. Because they realise sooner or later that they have to experience it in order to release it. So many people who are on what you call the Natural Love Path are actually releasing emotions by experiencing their emotions; they're just not doing it with God. They're not having a relationship with God that they're trying to develop during the process. They're not open to God's Truth. But it is very hard.

Participant: So it takes much longer?

Of course. You imagine releasing your terror without having a backup person. And I don't mean a backup person on Earth, I mean God in that regard. It is difficult but it can be done because God created you to be able to release everything by yourself, actually.

Participant: So it's basically because of not trusting in God that people don't want to go there? Because if they trusted they would allow themselves to go to that, past that limit?

No I feel a lot of the problems are related to the trust of themselves - that God created within them the ability to feel everything. If we truly trusted God we would understand that one fact about ourselves - that God created us in such a way that we are capable of experiencing everything, and particularly we are capable of experiencing everything that happened in our past. It's already happened, we've already experienced it. So we're definitely capable of experiencing it. And particularly as an adult we're definitely capable of experiencing it considering that for a lot of it, the very negative things that happened to us happened as a child. So we are certainly capable as an adult to experience those things that have happened as a child. [00:20:00.21]

7.5. Our fear is carried with us everywhere

The issue that most of us face is that we don't want to. We don't want to feel a lot of these kind of feelings of being overwhelmed, of feeling crazy, feeling stupid, everyone around us telling us that we're nuts doing it and all those kinds of things. That you've got to get control and you've got to get rigid with yourself, you've got to move on and you've got to forget the past and all these kind of things, which you can't ever do unless you release the emotion. Because the emotional signature of the past will be carried with you wherever you go. (AJ sings) "Everywhere you go, you always take the weather"; that's true.

You will take with you the internal weather system you are creating that you are not allowing change everywhere you go. Everywhere you go. You can change locations, so you can move from the sunny coast to here, doesn't change a single thing. You can move from here to the spirit world, doesn't change anything. It's only when you realise that you're taking the weather with you and unless you face what the weather is inside of you, unless you face what is inside of you, you're willing to actually truthfully address and actually feel and you realise that, that any progression can occur. So do it. Make the choice to do it. Now many of us have a lot of spirit interference with making that choice, we have a lot of issues with making the choice personally.

7.6. We must be overwhelmed to grow

But the biggest issue that we have most of the time is just we don't ever want to be overwhelmed.

Participant: And yet it's the best feeling afterwards, it's the best.

Of course, because when you're overwhelmed, you release something and therefore there's a feeling of release. But it only happens when you're overwhelmed generally. And for the majority of us what we're trying to do is we're trying to feel our feelings and do our life in very strict borders, we are trying to do it within these borders and it's only when we're willing to actually feel beyond those borders that we've created, that we finish up changing. So it's a big problem for us.

8. Common emotional injuries in males in the audience

I've talked about some of the women's issues. For many of you men you know what your primary fear is? Do you have any idea? What your primary fear is?

Participant: Being alone for the rest of your life without a woman. (Laughter)

Yeah, let's narrow that down a little further shall we.

Participant: Why is that funny?

Why is that funny? Yeah. I think because a lot of others feel the same thing. But go on, from that what is actually happening?

Participant: Not feeling loved.

Yes. But specifically it's love from a women, isn't it?

Participant: Yeah.

So you're not interested in being loved by a man.

Participant: To a degree, but not as much.

Yeah, okay. So what is it that the love of a woman's meant to give you?

Participant: Wholeness.

Okay. So you feel incomplete without it.

Participant: Yeah, probably, I'm not sure.

Isn't it interesting that you put up your hand though with so much firmness about it.

Participant: Well it's what I've been going through.

I agree but you're not sure about it.

Participant: I don't know. I've been going through a process with my partner that I actually realised that I've actually got to go through a process of letting her go rather than forcing everything and trying to make her be more loving and whatever else.

Yeah. But see your action has been in the past to try to force the woman into becoming more loving with you.

Participant: Yes.

But the average man in this audience doesn't do that. You know what he does?

Participant: I don't know.

So you have had demands that you've placed on the woman in order for the woman to love you.

8.1. The addiction of pleasing women

The average man in the audience doesn't do that. They do the opposite. What's the opposite of that? Come on guys, you're the ones who feel these things. [00:24:19.29]

Participant: Please the woman.

Yeah, pander to her every whim, even when her whims are completely out of harmony with love, completely out of harmony with truth, completely out of harmony with humility for herself, completely out of harmony with any faith in God, completely out of harmony with even the exercise of your own free will: and yet you're willing to just pander, pander, pander, pander, pander under the belief that at some point in the future she might love you and you might get that feeling that she loves you. And of course the more you do for her, the less you feel loved, which is the law in fact. God's Law is the more you do for other people that you are giving, feeding an addiction, the less you're going to feel something, not more. That's the law.

Do you know what most of us guys need to learn? To have a backbone. That's what we need to learn, to have a backbone to honour love, honour truth, honour humility, honour faith, honour will - honour these things with your partner, forget about trying to get her approval. If you do those things, you will automatically have the approval of every other person that does those things. Now if your partner is not one of those people, well then you're not going to have her approval, ever, actually until she also honours love, honours truth, honours humility, honours faith and honours will. You are not ever going to have any decent relationship. That's the reality.

And you can pander, pander, pander all you like, but you're not going to have any relationship until you honour those particular things. And she might then go through a huge amount of rage with you and leave you and all those other things, and you have to feel your emotions, because that's what humility would do. You'd have to still tell her the truth, "No I'm not going to do what you want because you're just trying to control me." You'd have to tell her the truth even though she might leave you as result of you telling her the truth. For the majority of you guys you are just pandering over and over again, in the end for the same goal that Alex mentioned, but Alex does a different thing than most of you do. Alex tried to push the woman into doing that for him. You are trying to cajole the woman into doing that for you. Can you see that? For the majority of you guys, can you see that? Yeah. It's happening all the time for many of you. [00:26:55.18]

8.2. Common fears in males in the audience pertaining to women

Participant: Is the bottom line fear? Is it coming from what you asked, Alex - fear that I'm not okay?

Of course the bottom line is fear. Whenever we do any of these things, whenever we sacrifice love, truth, humility, faith and will, or even one of them, fear is always the bottom line. So what would the fear be?

Participant: The fear that I'm not okay.

That I'm not okay. Yes. But you don't feel that you're not okay when you're with other men. Definitely for you, it's a much less feeling, isn't it? You feel a lot more equal with other men. But when it comes to that specific relationship with your partner, now you feel that you're not okay unless you do everything she wants and then she makes you feel like you're okay. So that feeling is certainly a problem, isn't it? But it could be many other feelings, and the truth is all we'd be doing is guessing all of the feelings until we decide to have the humility to feel them, to feel our fear firstly of what it is we're trying to achieve.

So you know that your wife or your partner wants you to do something, and you don't really want to do it and what you do is, you just sit there and go, "I don't really want to do this but I know she wants me to do it and I know she's going to get upset with me if I don't do it." And if you just sit there and feel that, you'll start to feel why you feel so addicted to doing that. And you feel the fear of it - what it feels like to receive her disapproval so strongly. What does it feel like? And a lot of you feel totally gutted just to receive a woman's disapproval. That's the reason why you have no backbone with women, because you feel gutted when the disapproval comes at you. And so if you felt it and did not act instead and just felt it, you would work out what's under it. You would work out what fear is under it, what it is you are afraid of.

Now for some of you it's afraid of that you'll never have sex for the rest of your life because the only way you have sex is by doing exactly what the woman wants. In other words you're in a bartering system for sex - for some of you it's like that. For some of you you're in a bartering system for approval. So in other words you try to do everything possible to make the woman just have a good feeling about you. So the woman feels like, "Oh he's a lovely person," or, "He's a lovely man." Or some of you are bartering for the feeling of sexual attraction coming from your partner - in other words that your partner wants you. Some of you are bartering for the feeling that you're better than any other man. In other words you want to feel that you are better in her eyes than any other man. Some of you are looking for that.

But whatever the reason is, you're not going to find it until you feel what the fear is that's on top of it. And the only way you're going to feel what the fear is, is by stop pandering and feel the barrage of rage that comes from her and feel what you feel like as a result, and be humble to that emotion. Many of you are not humble to that emotion. You get the barrage of rage and then what happens is you get in a rage in response. You get the disapproval from her and then you feel really angry that you've gotten the disapproval. You get the desire to control from her and then you get really angry that now she wants to control you rather than feeling the grief that comes with the feelings. If we're humble, that's what we'll do - feel the grief that comes with the feeling of not being approved of, not being loved, not being wanted, not being sexually acceptable and all these other emotions that might come up as a result.

We're locked into the concept that we can only go a certain way and the rest is their fault. "They need to change first" is what we're always thinking. And we're not being an adult about it because we're not saying, "Well obviously this feeling is inside of me." As you said Paul, if I feel good about myself, if the woman wanted me to do something that was out of harmony with love, truth, humility, faith and will I would draw the line. I'd say, "No I can't do that." No matter what the result, if it meant that she walked out the door and walked off with another guy, you'd still have the line. And I would say if she walked off with another guy for you having a line drawn down those qualities, then it means she's not very focused on those qualities herself. And a lot of times we don't want to find that out either. So we need to allow ourselves to confront these boundaries that we're placing there.

8.3. Common addictions in the males in the audience that prevent a relationship with God

Now for many of you guys, the reason why you're not having a close relationship with God is because you do not want to feel many of those emotions; you just don't want to feel them. You'd rather get angry or you'd rather avoid them, or for many of you you'd rather just get busy. You'd rather busy yourself up. You don't want to spend time with the girl because every time you spend time with the girl it causes these certain fears and particularly the grief to be triggered that you don't want to feel, and so it's better if you're busy doing this or busy doing that. So we become workaholics. [00:32:45.14]

A lot of men become alcoholics as well, busy drinking to get rid of the fear. And in particular to get rid of the fear of the grief that's present within them. Every man who's an alcoholic is full of grief about his relationship with his partner generally. Full of grief: and yet he doesn't want to feel it. And if we want to progress towards God, we're going to need to feel it because if we're going to progress towards God, love, truth, humility, faith and will are the things that put it all together. If we're going to compromise any one of those things for the sake of a personal fear, we're not going to have it altogether when it comes to our relationship with God.

We can't avoid doing those things and expect to still get a relationship with God. God is not going to conform to you. God's not going to somehow modify Her Universe to suit Alan John Miller. God doesn't do that and it doesn't matter who you are, God doesn't do it for you. This makes sense - God created a perfect universe, so if God modified it, then it would no longer be perfect, so God can't do that. God's already created a perfect universe and it's up to us to decide to either conform to the way it works or not. That's our choice. If we don't, there will be certain pains that we will have that are all governed by how much fear that we're willing to experience in the end.

9. The importance of self-examination of our true soul condition

So what I would like to encourage many of you to do is to examine yourselves again. I've encouraged you many times before to examine yourselves, but I want to encourage you to examine yourselves again. Many of you who believe you are going very well are actually doing very badly when it comes to your relationship with God. Many of you don't realise it but actually you're still in the hells of the spirit world, if you pass today. You believe that that's not true, but you would be, primarily because of your fear, because of what you honour - because your god is your fear and that's what you honour.

For many of you, you justify not acting in harmony with love, truth, humility, faith and will to yourself. That's what you do and you can't expect to get closer to God that way. You can't expect to be happier that way if you keep justifying to yourself what's going on. But you do keep doing it. And what I suggest to you is find out why and feel why you want to do that. Feel why. Why do you want to do that?

9.1. The example of single women in the audience (continued)

So for you ladies, who are single, feel why you want to be single, feel it. Really feel it - be honest with yourself about it. How much control you want, how much you want somebody who you believe is perfect. Some of you even know who your soulmates are and you're making no attempt whatsoever to do anything about it, because you don't like them. You don't. Some of you know who they are and you don't like them. How arrogant and condescending is that? Like that's the other half of you and you don't like them? If you don't like what God has created as the other half of you, do you think you're in a better place than that part of you if you don't like them? I don't think so. So you might arrogantly assume that you're much better than he is and you're going to wait until he gets into some kind of condition before you'll engage him, or before you'll do anything about yourself and your own attitudes about the opposite gender. And you look down upon him and you criticise him and you go, "Oh I wish I had another soulmate, any soulmate other than him would be better," and in that moment you have no idea how far away from God you are. [00:37:02.24]

9.2. Being loving and truthful to others

We often also see different things going on here in the group and we go, "People can come for five years and learn about love and still treat people badly in the audience that they're learning about love with." That doesn't make any sense to me. Many of you withdraw from truthful exchanges with people. Do you know what I mean by that? You can feel how much you don't want to engage a certain person. They walk up to you every time and they have to say something to or they try to engage you and you don't want to engage them, and you don't say to them, "Look, I don't want to engage you. And to be frank with you I can see there's an issue of love there, and I can see that I need to work out what it is," and it could be an issue of love in the other person, where you need to discover what it is as to why you don't want to engage them, but let yourself see it for a change. Ask yourself why is it that you can't love all of your brothers and sisters on Earth. Ask yourself why. There's always a reason, usually a fear-based one you need to feel, but it's a good one to find because then you'll release something in the end.

9.3. Embracing the Divine Truth that we have heard

I can't see how the truth can grow on the planet when the people who have heard the truth for the longest period of time are still in huge disagreement with it inside of their souls. Do you know what I mean by that? It's like we're so focused on rebellion with God and God's Laws and the basic five principles of what we're going to need, that it's like we're fighting every step of the way. And how can God's Truth on the planet grow when those of us who have heard it actively decide to work against what we've heard? Can you see? It gets to the point where there needs to be a whole new crop of people who hear Divine Truth for the first time and go, "Yeah, I'm really enthusiastic about that." But sooner or later they're going to hit the same barriers we're in. They're going to hit the same fear constructed barriers and finish up doing what we finish up doing. So how are we going to get through that? We're only going to get through that by choosing to put it all together and focus our whole life on developing these particular things - love, truth, humility, faith and will. That's the only way we're going to be able to do it.

10. Audience discussion about the feedback

So what do you feel about that? And be honest. How many of you know that you feel stagnant? So a lot. What have you blamed? Has it been because AJ and Mary haven't given enough talks on certain subjects? Or it's because AJ's flitting all over the countryside and he can't give me the personal help that I need to grow? What is it that you blame? Is it your partner, they just don't change fast enough? What is it that you blame internally? Have you thought about it?

10.1. An example of a participant who blames herself

Participant: I feel I blame myself a lot. I do feel like I see a lot of my limitations in some of those areas that you've talked about today.

Do you feel blaming yourself is loving yourself?

Participant: No. It's not.

So can you see that you have obviously an addiction to blaming yourself? So have you given much thought about what that addiction would be?

10.1.1. Blame is a way to avoid emotions

Participant: I feel like in blaming myself I can avoid taking responsibility.

I agree.

Participant: And I feel like in blaming myself I avoid feeling a lot of my rage.

So you avoid feeling specific emotions that you really don't want to feel.

Participant: Yeah.

Okay, I agree.

Participant: I feel I've started to take a little bit more responsibility about that. I can avoid really feeling my fears of the truth about myself and my fears about what I won't be able to achieve or...

See I don't know if I agree with this, where you think your fears are. It's like you're blaming yourself for your fears but the reality is you're terrified of other people's opinion. [00:42:52.05]

Participant: I am, really.

So that's not afraid of yourself, that's afraid of what other people think of you.

Participant: Yes. I agree. I am.

And you are terrified of spirits' opinions of you, which means you're terrified of them and what they'll do if you actually don't blame yourself. See a lot of the times what I feel people finish up doing when they blame themselves, blaming themselves is an avoidance of other issues. Blaming yourself is an avoidance of personal responsibility for example. When you blame yourself, ironically you get to not take responsibility. Blaming yourself also is a way of preventing how you feel about yourself, so in other words preventing shame, preventing those kinds of emotions that make you feel terrible about yourself.

But the main reason why we blame ourselves, as I've talked to you about before, is because we get away from other people blaming us when we blame ourselves. In other words we avoid the attack of other people by blaming ourselves. So that's the addiction. So my suggestion is to look at the addiction of blaming yourself. So I don't feel that blaming yourself is actually so much of an emotion as an addiction to get away from other emotions that you don't feel you can cope with.

10.2. An example of a participant being afraid to speak up in the workplace

Participant: Yep. I've noticed lately the terror that comes up, when I want to speak up, or I feel like I want to speak up for myself in an environment where I'm really feeling like nobody else is going to agree with...

So why would you want to speak up in an environment where nobody else agrees?

Participant: To challenge that?

Yeah see my preferred option there would be just to walk away from that group of people. So why do you feel you have to stay and speak up rather than just walk away?

Participant: I guess at the moment it's because I've got a job and I guess I'm afraid I'm not going to survive if I don't do these things in the world.

Yep. See I feel a lot of these things though get created by other emotions that we're unwilling to feel. See a lot of times what I notice many of you doing speaking up, like you say you're speaking up for truth, many times that's not what I see happening.

What I see happening is you're not understanding that most of the time you're not being loving in that place and you feel like you have to speak up for what they're doing to you. But in fact what's happening is you're already projecting something on them and they're just responding to you. That's what I notice happening a lot.

For example we often get emails from people saying, "What I've worked out is that we need to tell the truth to everyone around us, and be examples of truth." And I go, yeah okay, let's be examples of truth, lets really be examples of truth. If we're really an example of truth, the very first quality we're probably going to display is humility. And if humility is the first quality that we're going to display, then that means that we will feel our own emotions before we'll try to address somebody else's. It won't be the other way around. And what I notice many of you doing is addressing the other people's emotion before you've even felt your own. To me that's not a mark of humility, that's not telling the truth. Telling the truth would be, be humble first, feel your own emotion first and then if there is still something to correct, maybe correct it in a more public setting or directly with the individual.

But the question also has to be asked if they're not asking you for assistance and they don't want assistance in their heart, and if you can leave them, then just leave them. Why aren't you leaving them? If you're in a job and you know you have to have the job for whatever reason, then why aren't you doing the best things you possibly can to conform to everything the person wants? See to me having a job means, for example if I were a window cleaner and I was working for somebody, and they told me to climb on a big ladder to window clean, I would look at the safest way I could climb up the window and do the window. I wouldn't complain about that it's unsafe and I wouldn't do all these other things, I would want to serve. Many of us don't want to serve unless we get something in return.

Participant: Yeah, I feel like that there is a lot in this job that I really feel is loving and the whole focus is a loving focus. I guess in the sense of speaking up for myself it's in an environment where I'm encouraged to, but I can feel my terror of their opinion of me I guess, when I do speak just what I want. I'm being asked to say it.

This is what I'm saying to you - one of your primary fears is your fear of other people's opinion. And that's certainly a fear that you definitely have and I feel that many here have it. This is one reason why we don't tell the truth when we're asked the truth. We still don't tell it because we're afraid of other people's opinions. Yep. But that's not the same as forcing your opinion on another person, is it? And there are many of you who want to force your opinion on other people and that's not a loving course of action actually, that's a demand being placed on another person. [00:49:06.07]

10.3. A lack of humility in audience members

So the question I asked was what do you feel about these issues that I'm raising with you? What do you feel is going on for you inside of these issues. So for you ladies who are struggling with feeling like you really do want a relationship, what I feel from many of you is that you want a relationship but you want it all on your terms, the whole lot of it. You want everything to be exactly how you want it to be. You want him to look a certain way, be a certain height, be a certain size, have a certain youthful type of vigour, depending on your own and you want him to be safe and secure, you want him to be financially safe and secure, and you want him to be sound and it's like - are you all of these things? Are you? But you want them to be all these things. Why is that? Like what's going on there? Isn't it that you're unwilling to see your own self and yet you believe somehow that you deserve this. Like I don't know, what's going on for you? What do you feel?

What I think is happening for many of us is that we have a very, very false sense of ourselves. And that's what I feel is our primary issue is - a lack of humility in other words; remember part of humility is seeing yourself as God sees you, not as you want to be seen, not as you believe you should be seen, but as God actually sees you. Now if you do that, I feel you will see very many things about yourself that you can change; but I feel many of you are terrified of seeing yourself as God sees you and I don't really understand that given the fact that God already sees it. It's not like you're going to protect yourself from God in some way by coming to see how God sees you. God already sees these things inside of you and God is waiting for you to see these things yourself. So if God already sees the way you are, then surely it would make sense for you to want to see yourself in the same manner rather than trying to protect yourself from all of that.

11. God created our souls in a pristine state

Participant: I was just reflecting on what you were saying about wanting to see myself the way God sees me and since I've started on this path I've discovered a lot of things about myself that I didn't know that are not very nice. And when you talk about the fear that we're not willing to engage...

Can I just stop you for a second though? When you say you see a lot of things about yourself that are not very nice, can I just correct that viewpoint? Because when you say that you're basically saying that you believe that all of those things that you see that are not nice are a part of your soul. In other words you believe they are a part of your character and nature, don't you?

Participant: Yeah.

That is completely incorrect from God's Perspective. They're not a part of your character and nature. They're the mud that's been thrown at you that you've now acted upon. They're not a part of your character and nature. The reality is that all of those things that are like a cake on your soul, that you don't like, that are all dirty parts, what you see as dirty parts of your own soul, they're not parts of your own soul. God didn't create them; people around you and your own choices created them.

Participant: But it feels like that's all that I am.

I know but that's an error. See if you had faith that God created your soul, you would not believe that error. And therefore you'd be willing to feel those emotions to release them. And when you release them you'd no longer believe this.

You see this is the problem, you don't have faith that God created a pristine soul, which is what you really are inside and there's all this mud that's caked around the outside of the pristine soul - all this black stuff that's carried around the outside of this pristine soul. And you are now looking at that in the mirror and going, "That's me." It's not you. It's stuff that can come out of you. And this false belief that it's you, which you want to hold onto, stops you from letting it go.

God created our soul as pristine, but the emotional injuries we have are like mud covering the pristine soul

Participant: And I feel that that's what stops me from wanting to see how God sees me because I'm scared that God only sees the false belief that I hold on to.

Exactly. The problem is you're only seeing the injuries, but God sees all of you; God sees the beautiful pristine parts that God created too. And part of what God wants you to face is the truth that God created all these beautiful parts too, that you're not seeing. You don't want to face that because all you see when you look in the mirror is all these muddy bits that are caking the soul and then you judge that as you, you think it's you. It's not you; it's just the mud that's on you. [00:55:04.24]

11.1. An analogy of having mud on our body

Let me put it another way, and use another analogy for you. If I got you and rolled you in the mud - our clay on our dam is pretty muddy, you'd come up and you'd be caked with the stuff, it would be everywhere. In your ears, in your nose, in your eyes, in your mouth, your body would be caked with it and if you had clothes on you wouldn't even see them half the time because there'd be so much mud. That's how much mud there is in the dam. So when you go now and look in the mirror, do you go, "Wow, you're now so disgusting, you shouldn't ever have a wash."

Participant: (Laughs) No.

What do you do? You go wow, you're looking pretty disgusting at the moment, you need to have a wash, don't you? Isn't that what you do? And you're confident aren't you in that place that when you have a wash, that the majority, if not all of that mud that you now have all over you will be gone, are you not?

Participant: Yep.

So why don't you have that same confidence when it comes to your own emotions? It's because you don't have faith in that process. And you need to ask for faith and develop faith in that process, by experiencing it. For the majority of people, we're looking at all of this mud, we're calling it ourselves and then we decide we're not going to let it go because we don't believe we're able. And God's trying to say to you, "Nat, Nat, Nat, just face the truth for a bit. This mud that's on you, I didn't put it there. I created your soul, and I put no mud on it. You and other people have gone and rolled around in the mud. That's what's happened. Now you can have a wash or you can stay muddy the rest of your life. What do you choose?"

Participant: I'd like to have a wash.

Now obviously it would make sense to choose to have a wash. But interestingly enough physically we will choose to have a wash, but emotionally, what do we choose? We choose to leave it all on there. And not only do we choose to leave it all on there but we look at it in the mirror and say, "Now you're a terribly muddy person." And then the next day, "You're a terribly muddy person and it's getting worse." And the next day, "it's terrible". This is the person you've become, that's what you believe. It's not true, it's not true. This is the person that has got mud all over them that can be washed off and there's only one way, God's Way, of washing it all off. But it involves you exercising your will in harmony with some faith in God, in harmony with the belief that love will cure all things and wanting to know the truth about what's there.

It's like if you don't know there's mud in your ear, do you think you're going to get something and clean it out? No you'll leave it in and somebody will come along, "You didn't wash yourself very well, there's still mud in your ear." Someone will tell you the truth. And we're not even reliant upon that, because God's Universe is all constructed in the manner to allow ourselves to see the complete truth about what is going on.

So we need to understand from God's Perspective, God created a pristine soul. Any mud that's on our soul is a result of not only what has happened to us in the past, but very much primarily a result of our personal choices. Now we can wash that mud off, through a process, just like you can physically wash the mud off your body through a process, but it's going to involve you taking some personal effort.

The problem is when you believe that you are not the pristine soul and you believe that the mud surrounding your soul is a part of you; you then get away with making no effort. So it's almost a way to go into this self-delusional place where we believe it's useless making an effort. And to be honest, a lot of us like that. Because we don't want to make an effort, a lot of us don't want to make one. So we like that. We like making the excuse that it's a part of us rather than just making an effort to go and have a shower, from God's Perspective, and release this emotional baggage that we have that will make us clean. [00:59:47.10]

11.2. Emotional injuries enter our soul but are not our pristine self

Participant: I've had this understanding that the soul was like your emotions, your feelings, your errors and this is kind of something different that you're saying.

Well no, I'm saying that when these emotions hit us, they do enter us of course but they're not a part of our pristine self. They've become a part of us but they're not out real self, we can release them. The reality from a logical perspective is this - if something has entered us it makes sense that the same thing can also be released from us. From a logical perspective that makes sense.

So if we look at it from an emotional perspective, let's say the emotion of anger towards men has entered us, which is an emotion you feel, you have the ability to release it, because the fact that it entered you means that you also have the ability to release it.

The soul is able to release emotional injuries that have entered it

There are certain things that you are not going to be able to change inside of you that God created. So God created some things about your personality for example, that you are never going to be able to change. In fact you'll get to the point where you'll want to grow them; you'll want to expand them. They're some of those things you can't change. But a lot of the things we believe are our personality, are not our personality.

Aspects of the soul that God created, such as personality, cannot be released

For instance if you believe your personality is that you don't like men very much, that's not a personality. That's an emotion that's entered your soul and can be released. This is why I like to liken it as mud on the outside of your soul and you just have a wash.

Remember when I give illustrations, and I'm not talking about actual reality, I'm talking about the illustration that is we've got the mud around our soul, it got there, it can be washed off. And this is the case with all of our negative belief systems. All of our negative emotions, all of our lack of love that exists within us, can all be washed off. The whole lot can leave us but it's only going to leave us by our use of our will.

11.3. Only we can control the state of our soul through the use of our will

I am the only person who has control over my own soul. So if that's my soul, whatever is in it right now, I am the only person who can choose to make the choice of releasing whatever it is, to having the wash if you like. I'm the only person who can do it. It's only by the use of my will that it's going to happen. God's not going to come along, wave some magical wand and go, "Okay you're now all clean," and you didn't have to do anything. God's not going to do that, and never will in fact.

There's no blood sacrifice. What a lot us really want is a blood sacrifice. Do you know what I mean by a blood sacrifice? It is this Christian belief that Jesus died for your sins, and so none of you need to worry about your sins anymore because all you have to do is believe that Jesus died for your sins and all of your sins are all washed away as a result. The reality is many of you want to believe that. Why would we want to believe that? Because we don't want to have to use our own will to take some kind of action in order to release what's there. That's why we believe it. That's why we want it.

Once we come to understand God's Truth, we come to understand, no, actually God's Truth is that every single one of us is individually responsible for ourselves. We are individually responsible for every single thing we choose to do. In fact we are individually responsible for the retention of every emotion within our soul. We're not individually responsible necessarily for its creation, because it might have been created by events that have occurred around us. But now that it's in us, we are responsible for its retention; we are responsible for it staying within us. And if we want it out of us, we are going to have to take some choice or decision that's different. That's the reality; we're going to have to make a different choice. [01:04:21.09]

12. Closing words

So what I would like to encourage each of you to do is, if you feel like discussing this more tomorrow, in "Relationship with God - Putting It Together Session 2" think about what you would like to ask about these matters, in terms of living your life in harmony with these particular principles in order to develop your relationship with God further. And ask the questions tomorrow that you would like to ask about how that can be improved. You could even ask how you think you're going, how you feel things are going for you personally in terms of some of these things; you can ask those questions too if you're brave enough to do it and actually have it recorded.

Mary and I have decided we are not going to do any more seminars here in Murgon for some time to come. The main reason why we've decided it is because we feel that the majority of the people who are here are still using the seminars as a way to come to something but not to actually deal with the actual issues that are raised during them. So we would like to see you all become more personally responsible for your own relationship with God. We feel the problem is the more that we have interactions with you that bear little or no fruitage; more what we're doing is supporting some of these addictions that you're unwilling to go through. Many of you need to get angry. Many of you need to feel your fears more. Many of you need to address some of your grief more. Many of you need to be more honest about how you truly feel about your neighbour. You need to have all of these things occurring.

We don't feel that having more information presented to you is going to help you do that. We feel we have already presented enough information about all of those things. In fact we feel that we've presented so much information that some of you are overwhelmed with information without applying it. You get to a point where you just go, "I'm in saturation now, I can't handle any more, I can't hear any more, I can't act on any more," and those kinds of things. A lot of times that is driven by fear as well. And what we would like to see is if you want a seminar here in the future, that you start working your way through some of these particular issues. What we feel for many of you is there is a strong need for you to examine your fears, and to be far more honest with yourself. [01:07:05.14]

12.1. Spirit influence towards audience members

Can I say to you today though that you've been very disengaged today as an audience, have you noticed that? There's a very heavy spirit influence on you as an audience. There's a strong feeling of wanting to avoid, that we've been feeling, which is the reason why we feel we can't do any more seminars here - because we've been feeling that now for the last three or four seminars here.

We feel that many of you are under heavy spirit influence because you're unwilling to address some addictions that you have. You're getting under more and more heavy spirit influence. And to be frank with you, we feel many of you over the next six months, if you don't do something about it, will find that you don't want anything to do with Divine Truth anymore. That's what we feel will happen for many.

So we would encourage you to go back over some of the information we've presented about spirits and their influence, such as "Spirit Relationships - Positively Responding to Spirit Influence", and work through some of the addictions that cause these influences to occur. We've just done a series of FAQ's on spirits as well, just to assist you in that regard, to work your way through what's going on from a spirit influence perspective.

There are now organised groups of spirits in the spirit world who specifically attack any person who wishes to find or have anything to do with Divine Truth. So they're just going around, and every new person gets attacked by these spirits almost immediately, as soon as they find Divine Truth. That is a big issue that many of us face and for those of us who have been listening for a long time, and finding ourselves quite stagnant; the more you stagnate, the harder you're going to find your life.

12.2. Trusting God

So my suggestion to you is to have some trust in God, trust in love, trust in using your will, have some faith, have some humility and work though the issues that you're stagnant on, rather than holding on to them. Because the more you hold on to them, the harder this is going to get for you. If you release them, it doesn't get hard; it only gets hard when you hold on to them. So let yourself release; let yourself go through the process. Let yourself go through the process even though other people might not agree with it. Allow yourself to do those things.

Can I suggest just trust God more: trust God more. Because honestly what we notice is the people who are enthusiastically trusting God, trusting the process, their lives are changing very rapidly and they are having a lot more joy in their life. Notice those people amongst the group and ask them what are they doing? What's going on for you? Why is that happening for you? Ask them questions about that. Because there are some people that are doing that and they'll be able to help you through this process of feeling stagnant and feeling down and feeling oppressed, which are all feelings that many of you are feeling. You're feeling oppressed and down and under the weather and my suggestion is a lot of that is because we're unwilling to feel certain addictions that we have, and if you can allow yourself to release them that would be fantastic: so that's what we'd encourage you to do.

Thanks for your time today, guys.

12.3. AJ explains his motivation for the feedback

Participant: I just wanted to really say thank you to you Jesus and Mary. I'm sure I'm not alone in saying that even though you feel that we're stagnating or whatever, I feel personally excited.

Yeah don't misinterpret my talk with you today though Monique. I'm not judgemental about where you're at, I can just see many of you in a lot of personal distress now, and what I'm trying to do is point out the reasons why. Because obviously when we see you in this personal distress we feel for you. We feel concern for your situation, we understand that many times it's because of the choices you're making as to why you're in the places you're in, and so that's why we're willing to be straightforward and honest with you about those choices that you're making. But please don't view it as judgement because that's not how we feel. Mary and I feel that we want to help you to get out of this place where you're constantly trying to feed your fears, and into the place where you honour these primary facets of your day-to-day interaction with God. [01:20:20.22]

So if all of you can remember that - we're not here to berate you or to make you feel bad or worse about yourself than you already feel. What we're trying to do is show you where the problem is. And for many of us, the problem is we're not honest with ourselves or we're not humble or we don't have faith or we're using our will out of harmony with love and we don't really want to love. That is our problem, and what we're trying to do is show you where the problems are.

If you have a problem with your relationship with God stagnating, it's always because of one of these things - love, truth, humility, faith or will. There's no other reason. It's always because of one of these things being exercised out of harmony with the way in which God has created her universal laws. And all we want to do is expose that to you so that you have a choice to either work on it or not. It's up to you as to what you do.

We would love to see you work on it because then you'll make changes and honestly the reality is; the way to measure whether something is really happening is the amount of large changes that are occurring in your life in terms of how other people see you and how other people are drawn to you. That's how you can measure a lot of change. So please don't interpret it as feeling like we feel you're stagnant and you've got to change, because that's not it.

Participant: No I feel pretty excited to be honest that after three and a half years of, "Oh this is what truth is about," and I just felt that this morning that wow I didn't get that for three and a half years. How there can be joy and there can be excitement and man, I missed that one. And God's Love, that was only a recent thing. It's about love, this path? I missed that one. And I don't have to push myself into emotion, humility, as I did for years and years and then it's like there's a bit of excitement there, it's not a chore. But as soon as the faith goes down, it's like whoa, there's darkness, there's spirits and everything turns black again. But it's pretty cool.

Exactly. And we feel too, what you're going through as a group, pretty much everyone after two or three years initially is going to finish up going through as individuals because that's the way it is. Most of the time we have a whole fiction about our life and ourselves and our real emotions and all those kind of things that have to be exposed somehow; and sooner or later they get exposed - God's beautiful like that. God always exposes anything that's out of harmony with love and out of harmony with our growth.

So the only reason why we give these kinds of talks, we are a bit firmer about some things about how things really are, is because we want you to be able to see what's going on for you. That's all. And not because we feel like you've got to change or you have to change or any of those other things - we'd just like to show you why you're in distress and what's going on really. And I feel that if you can look at those things more sincerely, you will be relieved of a lot of the distress that you feel as a result and you'll feel some positive feeling of working forward from that.

Participant: Thank you.

But thanks for the appreciation. (Applause) Thanks, guys.

