-Hi, guys. Welcome back to
"Tonight Show: At Home Edition."
Thank you so much
for being here.
Of course,
I'm doing this show from home.
There are my girls right there.
Hi, Winnie. Hi, Franny.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Here are -- are
the websites to check out,
redcross.org/statefarm.
Our neighbors at State Farm
are offering to match
up to $200,000 for this week.
So please keep donating.
That is awesome.
We love you, State Farm.
Thank you for doing that.
That is so cool.
So please,
give whatever you can.
They're going to match
up to $200,000.
-Yay!
-That's fantastic.
[ Thud ]
-Oh, dear.
-Winnie, you okay?
Okay, we're back,
because my camera operator
had to become a mom again and --
But everything's fine.
Everything's good.
Winnie, you okay?
-Yeah.
-Okay, good.
Franny, you okay?
-Yeah.
-Oh, perfect. Hey,
look at the camera and say hi.
-Hi.
-The camera --
Winnie, you want to look
at the camera and say hi?
-Hi.
-There you go.
Just charming, charming.
Our guests tonight
are Adam Sandler,
who is one of our favorites.
He's just always there for us
and just comforting,
and always --
I just love the guy.
So he's on the show, and his
charity is directrelief.org.
That is going straight to health
workers, healthcare workers,
nurses, doctors, everyone who is
out there on the front lines
fighting this pandemic for us.
We also have Jessica Alba, who
is just giving a lot of money
to Baby2Baby
through her company,
honest.com/donate.
So we'll be talking
to Jessica, as well,
and going through maybe some
makeup tutorials. We'll see.
Alright, I'm going to mute this
really quick. Hold on.
And then let's go down --
-Get in to the security system.
-I'm going to mute this, guys.
Okay?
-Okay.
-Thanks.
Let's go down.
Let's do a monologue.
Hey, pal.
Alright. Hey, Gary.
Guys, welcome, welcome, welcome
to "The Tonight Show:
At Home Edition."
Yay! Okay.
Guys, right now,
I'm reading jokes in my house
at a makeshift desk
to total silence.
Actually, this is exactly how
my parents pictured my career.
Let's get to some news.
Some experts are now suggesting
we wipe down our groceries
with Clorox.
Americans are like, "I'm doing
this to stay healthy,"
then realize they're wiping down
a bag of Fuego Takis.
[ Chuckles ]
Have you ever had Takis, honey?
-Never.
Never even heard of them.
-It's a new thing. Yeah, it's
like a rolled-up tortilla thing.
-Oh. I'll try one.
-New York governor
Andrew Cuomo --
-Whoo-hoo!
-New York governor Andrew Cuomo
said New York City playgrounds
will close.
Yep, it's going to be
really tough for all the kids
and that weird old guy
on roller skates.
I mean, where in the hell do you
find a Walkman these days?
There he is.
The mayor of Los Angeles
is now recommending
that all residents
cover their faces in public,
and since it's L.A.,
you get to play that fun game,
protected from the coronavirus
or botched nose job?
Or both.
The National Bobblehead Hall
of Fame and Museum announced
that Dr. Fauci bobbleheads
will be going on sale tomorrow.
Wow, that's incredible.
There's a National Bobblehead
Hall of Fame and Museum?
You can actually a buy
a Dr. Fauci bobblehead doll.
This bobblehead
is a little different,
because whenever it hears
a Trump press conference,
it slowly shakes its head
back and forth.
I saw an article that suggested
having an at-home dance party
as a way to get more exercise
during the quarantine.
"That's a great idea," said
only people living on the top
floor of their building.
A man in England ran a marathon
in his backyard
to raise money
for the National Health Service.
When he was done,
he went back inside,
spent a few minutes
with his family --
I'm going to do it again.
A man in England ran a marathon
in his backyard
to raise money --
'Cause it's pretty good.
A man in England ran a marathon
in his backyard
to raise money
for the National Health Service.
When he was done,
he went back inside,
spent a few minutes
with his family,
and then ran a second marathon.
[ Laughs ]
It's a good joke.
And finally, I saw that today is
National Peanut Butter
and Jelly Day,
although right now,
Americans' favorite PB&J
is Purell, Brawny,
and Jack Daniels.
That's my monologue for you
right there.
It's time for "Hashtags"!
[ Hisses ]
♪♪
Hey, guys.
Now it's time for "Hashtags."
We asked you guys
to hashtag a --
#QuarantineAMovie
was the hashtag,
and my example was
"Big Hero Six Feet Apart."
And you guys answered.
And thank you so much
for playing the game along.
We were trending #2 in the
country, so that was major.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Now I'd like to share
some of my favorite hashtags
with you right now.
#QuarantineAMovie. Here we go.
HeatherOnAir said --
Gosh.
I can't grab --
Am I becoming that guy
that licks his fingers
when he does that?
It's -- It's the jacket.
-[ Laughing ]
-I put on a jacket because
I'm tired of not dressing up.
And so I put on a jacket.
I have the patches.
And now I'm the guy that
licks his fingers when he --
when he -- Ugh. Gosh.
Here we go.
HeatherOnAir says, "How to Lose
Your Mind in 10 Days."
Pollygolightly says,
"Honey, I Flunked the Kids."
[ Light laughter ]
Any home-schoolers out there
know exactly...
-That's a good one.
-...what that's talking about.
This is from -- @WatchMojo said,
"A Star Is Bored."
[ Both chuckle ]
Come on. There's no such thing
as being bored.
You can find something to do.
This one is from RiepTide1999.
He said, "Edward Washinghands."
This one is from tinagibala.
#QuarantineAMovie.
She said,
"50 Shades of Gray Roots."
[ Laughing ]
This one's from hellofelicia14.
Hello, Felicia.
She says -- QuarantineAMovie --
Oh, it's a great classic --
"Spray Anything."
[ Imitates spraying ]
This one's from @SYFYWIRE.
It Says, "Avengers:
Infinity Conference Calls,"
which we're all on all day long.
Oh, I thought this one
was clever.
This one's from MsMann95.
She said, "Do Little."
"Dolittle."
She's got the brains.
This one's from @MargauxPolo4.
She put, "Frozen Pizza."
This one's from @Zaharako.
She put, "Good Will Hunting
for Toilet Paper."
I like this one.
It's from Caffeine748.
She put, "Gloves, Actually."
Actually, gloves.
This one's from SandyLeeTV.
Hi, Sandy Lee.
She put,
"The Devil Wears Sweatpants."
That's a good movie.
This one's from KevKellam.
"Stay at Home Alone."
These are #QuarantineAMovie
if you're just tuning in.
This one's from @ThisGirlTweeets
with extra E's.
She put,
"Ferris Buehler's Year Off."
This one's from @Booktrovert.
She put, "Romy and Michele's
Zoom Reunion."
[ Laughs ]
That is a movie
that should be in the works.
This one is from KelownaSteve.
He put, "Don't Stand By Me."
We're getting to the end here.
Leo7176865--
I mean, at this point,
what's the point?
At this point, what's the point?
If you're saying all those
numbers, that's silly. Okay.
This is leo7176861934119--
It's like pi.
Leo pi.
You know?
Alright, here we go. Leo says,
"My Best Friend's Wedding
Got Canceled."
[ Laughs ]
Oh, you have to laugh, right?
That's the whole point of this.
You have to laugh
if you have a wedding canceled.
The last one --
Oh, everyone's saying this.
This from morageilson1.
She said, "Groundhog Day."
That is our "Hashtags."
