 
Laura Lawrence

Isabella's Last Request

Laura Lawrence

Copyright © 2013 Laura Lawrence

All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any form without permission from the author. Exceptions are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

This book is licensed for personal use only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The places mentioned are real places but based on the authors opinions and experiences.

Acknowledgments

So here is book two and I have loved every moment of writing it. I want to start by thanking everyone who has read my first book and contacted me to ask for more! It is truly humbling to hear people love my work and it makes me happier than anyone could imagine!

I, of course want to again thank my amazing family and friends for their continued love and support and their understanding when I am too busy writing to see people. My amazing husband and son who have to put up with me in a daze while I think about my book or just write one last sentence before paying them attention.

I also want to thank Ana from www.virtualbird.wordpress.com for her proof reading, editing and general support and availability to bounce ideas off no matter what time of day or night it is! She also interpreted my appalling handwriting to type up my book as she edited it for me and was the one who came up with the name. Without her this book would be still sitting in a notepad waiting to be typed and checked!

To everyone who has supported me and read my book I love you all!

My name is Laura Lawrence. I live in Somerset with my husband and toddler.

I have been writing since I was a small child but until recently I would never finish a full book before getting distracted starting a new one. I currently have 5 published books.

To find out more about my writing and get updates from me please visit my Facebook page -

www.facebook.com/LLAuthor

Follow me on Twitter at @LLAuthor

Visit my website - http://lauralawrenceauthor.wordpress.com

Artwork by Luke Bailey - https://www.facebook.com/LukeBaileyDigitalArt?fref=ts

Edited by Anastasia Bird – www.virtualbird.wordpress.com

This book is dedicated to my amazing best friend Sara who has had a really hard year; you are the Isabella to my Olivia!

# Contents

The List 7

Prologue 13

Chapter One 15

Chapter Two 31

Chapter Three 43

Chapter Four 51

Chapter Five 59

Chapter Six 68

Chapter Seven 76

Chapter Eight 86

Chapter Nine 92

Chapter Ten 101

Chapter Eleven 107

Chapter Twelve 112

Chapter Thirteen 120

Chapter Fourteen 124

Chapter Fifteen 129

Chapter Sixteen 135

Chapter Seventeen 139

Chapter Eighteen 144

Chapter Nineteen 150

Chapter Twenty 154

Chapter Twenty One 158

Chapter Twenty Two 160

The Best Friend, Boyfriend Theory 165

CHAPTER ONE 165

##  The List

My name is Olivia Hope and this is the list my best friend Isabella Webber and I have made. We must complete the full list with no excuses. This is our dream list of 100 things to do before you die. Isabella's last request, so let's begin now.

100 Things To Do

1. Fall in love

2. Have amazing sex

3. Be the heroine of a book

4. Quit the job you hate

5. Travel the world

6. Visit all the 'must see' places in the UK

7. Hug a stranger

8. Don't limit anything, do whatever you want

9. Kiss a girl

10. Ride a rollercoaster

11. Buy everyone in the pub a drink

12. Buy 100 scratch cards and scratch them all at the same time

13. Swim with dolphins

14. Climb a mountain

15. Take a really posh, expensive car for a test drive

16. See all the pyramids

17. Camp out and see the pyramids at night

18. Hold a tarantula

19. Take a candlelit bubble bath with someone

20. Say 'I love you' to a boyfriend

21. Do a striptease

22. Learn to pole dance

23. Do a bungee jump

24. Sky dive

25. Do a parachute jump alone

26. Visit Paris with a boyfriend

27. Watch a lightning storm at sea

28. Stay up all night and watch the sun rise

29. Ask honest questions you'd otherwise be embarrassed to ask

30. See the Northern Lights

31. Go to a massive sports game and cheer really loud

32. Have sex outside

33. Touch an iceberg

34. Have sex at work or in a public place

35. Sleep under the stars

36. Compromise

37. Ride in a hot air balloon

38. Get drunk on champagne

39. Get high

40. Start the day with alcohol without feeling guilty

41. Have sex in every room in the house

42. Give more than you can afford to charity

43. Give your last pound to a homeless person

44. Laugh uncontrollably whenever you feel like it

45. Have a food fight

46. Bet on a horse with the worst odds of winning

47. Take a sick day when you're not ill

48. Have a threesome

49. Ask a stranger out

50. Have a snowball fight

51. Photocopy something you shouldn't at work

52. Scream until you lose your voice

53. Help birth an animal

54. Live out one of your fantasies

55. Go skinny dipping

56. Have sex in the sea

57. Make time for people

58. Fly without panicking

59. Do something selfless like volunteer

60. Go on an elephant safari

61. Go to America

62. Visit Vegas

63. Gamble for 24 hours straight

64. Go to an 'all you can eat' in America

65. Go to Disney World in Florida

66. Go to a water park

67. Drive through the desert

68. Visit the Grand Canyon

69. See the Seven Wonders of the World

70. Shop 'til we drop

71. Watch loads of shows

72. Go to Canada

73. Hike in Canada

74. Learn how to fish

75. Have a flying lesson

76. Go to a naturist beach

77. Have a long distance relationship and make it work

78. Sing karaoke

79. Sing loudly in a public place and not care if people stare

80. Change your image completely

81. Try on wedding dresses

82. Try on the worst outfit you can find in the shop

83. Get married

84. Do the tourist things at each place we visit

85. Talk to a stranger

86. Visit the space centre

87. Turn 21 in America

88. Go in a helicopter

89. Go on safari

90. Have a fake argument with someone in a public place

91. Walk in a straight line without moving to let people pass

92. Sunbathe until you change colour

93. Cry uncontrollably in a public place

94. Make every minute count

95. Go camping

96. Don't be afraid

97. Find a knight in shining armour

98. Try and blag a free meal

99. Fly first class

100. Love every moment of life

##  Prologue

'Are you sure you're up for this? It'll be a long time away from home.

'Yes Isabella for the thousandth time I want to do this. I never thought I'd travel the world, but what better time than now while we're still young? We've spent the last month making your list and have finally agreed on one hundred things to do. So please can we just go for it before I change my mind!'

'You really are the best friend I could ever ask for Livs! I can't believe you're dropping everything to come travelling with me!'

The look on her face is enough to make me drop anything for her. I love my best friend so much that I'd do anything she asked me to; well within reason, there are some things on the list that I'm not thrilled about.

'Well I'm not really giving up much! I mean I'm giving up my temping job and my comfy bed, but really that's about it. It's not like I have a man to keep me here or any other friends as good as you to entertain me.'

'Oh right I see, so you're only coming along so you won't have to find a proper job and some new friends then?'

Isabella sounds disgusted but I know she's joking, even if she is glaring at me.

'Umm... yeah that's about right actually. Now what do we need to pack?'

'Charming! Well as we don't know how long we'll be staying anywhere we will need to try and pack light. So I guess if we take one hairdryer and straighteners to share and maybe one make up bag to share? Then enough clothes to keep us going for about a month? Only one outfit for each day and about five pairs of shoes?'

'Oh Izzy I don't think you understand the whole packing light thing! I was going to say one outfit should last about four days and we only need two pairs of shoes, flip flops and something dressier. We'll be able to wash our clothes while we're away, so make sure you choose things that you like and want to wear over and over.'

'Eww, I'm not wearing something for four days! Maybe we should just go for a couple of weeks at a time? Or I could get my mum to send us fresh clothes?'

'Isabella this was your idea, now don't be such a princess. If you don't choose soon I'll pack for you!'

Isabella looks at me shrugging her shoulders before handing me her case and going to lie down on her bed. Looks like I will be packing for both of us again. It's just as well I enjoy packing. I look around Isabella's messy bedroom with clothes and make up all over the floor with smaller piles of stuff dotted around. To give her some credit she has started to pack, she just hasn't got very far. If she thinks she can live in this state while we're travelling she's got another thing coming.

#  Chapter One

I squint as the sun hits my eyes, my stomach flips forcing its way up and into my throat. I can't stop the shrill scream escaping my mouth as we're forced even higher. I try to look at Isabella to see if she's going through the same pain as me, but the sheer force of gravity is holding me rigid against my seat. My eyes fill with tears, as I grab hold of my waist restraint, I'm gripping so tight that one of my nails has snapped, but I couldn't care less. Sweat is building and I'm unsure if it's through fear and anxiety or just the heat and humidity.

I feel Isabella's hand on mine, even through the force and pressure she's being so brave and trying to keep me calm. I grip her so tightly my knuckles turn white and my fingers are numb. I close my eyes and pray we'll survive, and then I hear Isabella giggle; there's something in her laugh which relaxes me. I can almost feel my heart slowing to a slightly more normal pace; if she can laugh and enjoy this, then why can't I?

'Open your eyes, it's over!'

Keeping my eyes firmly shut I test the water, everything appears to have stopped. It does feel like I'm on the ground again, but I'm not sure I can risk it yet.

'Liv seriously it's safe! We need to get off now otherwise we'll have to go round again'

This is enough to convince me. I force my eyes open and look behind me to see the emptying rollercoaster and queues of people waiting to get on and face the jaws of death. I'm still grasping Izzy's hand as I stumble off the ride and back out into the glorious sunshine. How can she be so calm and collected after that?

'Ok Izzy, that's another off the list, what's next?'

'Hmm, I was thinking twisting dragons next? Apparently the two rollercoaster's get so close together that you can kick the person on the cart below you!'

I look over to Izzy to see if she's serious and I think from the look on her face, she might be.

'I was thinking more like lunch, maybe a nice drink and then possibly a film?'

'Olivia Hope! Have you forgotten why we're here? You're such a wimp!'

Isabella pouts at me, and I momentarily feel guilty, at the end of the day we are here for her, she does look knackered though I hope she's not pushing herself too much.

'Isabella Webber, don't you call me a wimp! I've done all the rollercoaster's in all the Disney parks, Universal was meant to be relaxing. We've already ticked rollercoaster off the list; surely we don't have to do anymore?!'

'Okay Livs, you win. Let's go to the Hard Rock Café and get some lunch. After, we can go watch some shows, and maybe go on the Simpsons ride?'

'We'll see, at least that's not a rollercoaster. I think even I can handle a simulation ride, now come on, my stomach has settled and I'm starving!'

As we head over to the Hard Rock Café I regret wearing jeans, even if they are cut offs. I'm so hot now that I'm tempted to go and buy a skirt or some shorts, or something! That's the great thing about Universal Studio's compared to Disney parks, they have such good shops. All full of my favourite brands: Animal, Roxy, Rip Curl, and many more, it reminds me of home with the surfers.

Izzy and I were born on May 5th in St Austell, Cornwall and that's where we've lived ever since. Our mum's met in hospital where they had beds next to each other and became firm friends; going to all the baby groups together like baby weigh-ins and baby sing and sign.

Consequently, Izzy and I have been best friends since the day we were old enough to understand what it meant. With our birthdays on the same day, we used to tell people we were twins and a lot of people believed us! I think because we both grew up without dads, it made our friendship closer. We're more like sisters than friends.

My dad died when my mum was pregnant with me, he was in a car accident and apparently died instantly which is comforting, knowing he wasn't in any pain. Although, it's still devastating knowing I'll never get to meet my dad, never get to hear his voice, hug him, touch him or talk to him. Mum's still not over him, and it's been 21 years. She still talks about him all the time, especially as I get older. She's dated a bit but never allowed herself to fall for another man; as soon as she starts to feel the start of love, she dumps him. Her and my dad had been childhood sweethearts so she'd never been with another man, and never planned to be. This means I'm an only child, although I have Izzy. I'm desperately trying to get mum to go out and meet a nice guy, especially as I'm older and hoping to move out shortly.

On the other hand, Rita, Izzy's mum, had a short relationship with Izzy's dad. As soon as he discovered she was pregnant after a week-long love affair, he left. Rita is younger than my mum; she fell pregnant at just sixteen; so when she met my mum they needed each other. Mum had just lost the love of her life, and needed someone to help take her mind off it, someone to talk to and love. After all, I was only a baby, and as much as she loved me I couldn't give anything back. Rita needed someone to love her and help guide her through everything.

Rita's parents had thrown her out and washed their hands of her when they'd discovered she was pregnant. She'd gotten away with it for quite a while; wearing loose clothes and eating more chocolate in front of them so they'd think she'd just put on weight. Deep down, her mum thought this was a great thing, she knew that most men wouldn't be attracted to a little greasy haired, fat girl so she wouldn't have to deal with her daughter dating for quite some time. When she informed Rita of this, the truth came tumbling out; Rita was thrown out onto the streets. Rita moved around for the last week of her pregnancy, staying with friends in hostels and even spending some nights under the stars on a bench. My mum was only too pleased to let her move in with us.

'Are you two lovely ladies ready to order?'

I'm drawn back to the present when I see the sexy waiter standing between Izzy and I; we're surrounded by all this legendary rock memorabilia but all I can see is this stunning man. Izzy must be feeling the same, because as we order I notice we're both flirting slightly; fluttering our eyelashes, twisting our hair, Isabella pushing her ample chest out and me flashing my winning smile. By now, we both know our advantages and how to use them.

'Keep your hands to yourself Livs, he's mine. I think he could be my "Tell someone you love them and mean it". Unless of course you want to share him, and we can tick another couple off the list?'

Izzy smiles at me, her chocolate brown eyes glinting with mischief. I wonder why I agreed to helping her with this stupid list.

'Izzy, I'm going to say this once and once only. I love you but I'm not in love with you. When we thought up the list and put on "Kiss a girl" and "Have a threesome" I wasn't saying I wanted to be the girl that does it with their best friend! If you want him, you can have him'

'Okay ladies, here's your food. Can I get you anything else?'

I cringe as I hear his voice at my side; I hadn't heard him coming over. I really hope he didn't hear what I just said.

'Wow that was so fast. This looks lovely, thanks... Josh'

Isabella squints to read this name badge before going back to smiling and fluttering her eyelashes at him.

'When I have to serve a couple of girls as beautiful as you two, only the best will do. So enjoy, and if I can get you anything else, please shout.'

Josh smiles at us as he leaves the table, leaving us to enjoy our food.

'Thanks Josh, we will!'

I smile at my best friend, watching the sparkle in her eye; she looks so at home here. We're in the middle of America, so far from home, our family and our regular life but as always my best friend can settle in anywhere. Unlike me, I'm more of a creature of habit. I dislike change and have found this travelling lark really scary. We haven't booked anything in advance, except our current hotel and park passes. We're hoping to see America and explore as much as possible. We've not set any timeframes, so if we don't like one place, we can move on without worry. Well, according to Isabella there will be no worry. If you ask me, I'm already coming out in a stress rash and feel sick just thinking about it. Isabella is the brave and adventurous one, whereas I'm the smart, sensible one. Together we'd make the perfect power couple, if only we were lesbians, life would be so much easier.

It was Isabella's idea to come to America for our 21st birthday, she liked the thought of turning 18 again, and this is the best way to experience this. At the moment we're not allowed to drink alcohol over here, because we're under their legal limit, but in eight days we'll be able to get trashed – American style.

'Livs, I think I'm in love.'

Isabella is staring off into the distance behind me, I'm sure Josh is there and probably wondering why she's watching him so intently.

'Yeah well, I like him too! Why should you get all the decent guys just because I'm shy?'

Isabella returns her attention to me, cocking her head at me in confusion.

'You've had some lovely boyfriends, I don't always get them. Shall I call him over?'

'Hmm, what reason would you have for calling him over?'

'I'll think of something don't you worry, now smile!'

Isabella waits until Josh is facing us before casually knocking her knife to the floor.

'Let me get you a fresh one.' Josh rushes over, picking it up for her.

'Oh I wouldn't want to cause you any extra work, its fine, I can just wipe it on my napkin.'

'You British girls are so polite; anyone else would demand a new one immediately. To tell you the truth, I'd rather get you a fresh one. I'm trying to drag my time out by finding tasks because I don't want to go for my break yet.'

I can tell Isabella is about to say something, but I don't want them to forget I'm here so I interrupt, leaving her open-mouthed and slightly stunned.

'Why don't you want to go for your break?'

Josh turn quickly to look at me; I feel his eyes scan my body, taking in my child like frame. I feel my face flush slightly at the sudden attention.

'Well if I go for my break then it means I have to leave you two, and believe me I don't want to do that. It's very rare to have such beautiful customers, and two at one table is virtually unheard of.'

'Do girls actually fall for that?'

Josh and I both turn to stare at Isabella, who's now laughing at the look of surprise on our faces.

'Oh come on Livs, tell me you didn't get drawn in by that?!'

The look on my face must give her the answer she's looking for because she cracks up again.

Josh turns back to me, giving me a lopsided grin, gesturing to the bench I'm sitting on. I slide along to give him space to sit down.

'Marty, I'm on my break now, could you bring over a clean knife please mate?'

Josh hands the used knife to another waiter who rolls his eyes slightly before handing him a fresh one. I wonder how often Josh spends his break sitting with customers.

'Now correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't believe we invited you to join us. We're trying to have a quiet lunch, thank you very much.'

Josh grins at Isabella, raising his eyebrows at her; it looks like he may have met his match with her. I don't know how she has the confidence to talk to a stranger the way she just has. Josh shrugs as he stands up, getting ready to leave.

'Hey if that's what you want, I'll leave you to it. I was going to make sure you girls were getting the most of your trip to Florida, but that's fine. Sorry to intrude, I'll leave you to it.'

Isabella keeps her eyes on his, a smug smile on her face, like she's won. Sigh, okay, so it's up to me to get this beautiful man to stay.

'Ignore her. Sit back down, we'd love to find out what you think are the best sights in Florida.'

I realise in my slight eagerness to keep him near, I've grabbed his hand to pull him back down next to me. Isabella has clearly noticed too and is now glaring at me, her eyes darting from me to him. Her silent signal for "Get your paws off him, he's mine".

'So Josh, are you from Florida?'

I think holding his hand has given me a bit of confidence, because usually I'm quite shy and wait for boys to talk to me. Well, either that or Izzy takes over and does the talking for both of us.

'That's right, Florida born and bred. It's a great place! A lot of tourists come here just for Disney and Universal Studios, and miss all the wonderful things we have to offer. What have you done so far?'

I can't take the glares from Isabella any longer, so I take my hand from his, reaching for my drink so he doesn't think I just don't want to hold it anymore. Isabella sees this as her chance to speak.

'Well we've been here for just over a week so far, and we've done all the Disney parks, we went to Blizzard Beach Water Park yesterday. This is our first day at Universal, but we'll be back tomorrow.'

Josh looks from Isabella to me, and rolls his eyes as he pinches one of my chips. I think both Isabella and I have forgotten about our hunger, as both our plates remain untouched.

'Is there something wrong with the food?'

We both shake our heads and smile at him.

'So let me guess; you're staying on International Drive, you have a trip to Sea World planned and maybe even Discovery Cove if you have enough money left. You probably have just less than a week left?'

I want to say 'Wow, that's amazing... How did you know that?" But the way he said it makes me think it's a bad thing. Are we that predictable?

'Actually, we have all those things planned but that's not all, right Livs?'

They both look at me expectantly.

'Umm, no we don't have a time frame; we'll stay here until we've seen what we want. We're going to the beach one day too.'

'We have more than that planned, we have a whole list of 100 things to do, and quite a few can be done in Florida.'

'Can I see your list?'

I pull out the crumpled list from my bag. Luckily, we have a few copies of it; we made photocopies and keep a laminated copy at Isabella's. We also have our own copy each, so we can tick things off as we go; obviously we have our own personal goals to tick off.

Josh spends a couple of minutes studying our list, looking at all the things we've ticked off already.

'Now that's quite a list. You can tick off 85 – Talk to a stranger. My name is Joshua Mathers and I'm pleased to meet you. Also, if you want do either 9 – Kiss a girl, or 48 – Have a threesome; I'm here to help you out.'

Josh winks at Isabella and she shakes her head in mock disgust, but I know deep down she's lapping up the attention.

'I think that's good enough to cross off. It's nice to meet you Joshua, my name is Isabella Webber and this is Olivia Hope. Olivia is my best friend in the whole world, and we'd never ruin our friendship by doing number 9 or 48 with each other. If you want to help with the list, how about number...'

Isabella snatches the paper from his hand quickly, scanning it.

'Aha, here you go number 49! Ask out a stranger. 'She smiles sweetly and flutters her eyelashes at him. Josh instead turns his attention to me.

'Olivia is a beautiful name, why do you let her call you Livs?'

I want to shout at him for ignoring my best friend, nobody else would ever get away with that, but part of me loves the attention and doesn't want it to stop.

'It's only her that gets away with calling me Livs, so don't go getting any ideas!'

I feel a sharp pain in my shin, and it takes a few seconds to register Isabella has just kicked me under the table. I look across at her, she looks mad. I wonder if Josh is doing this on purpose to annoy her.

'So Miss Olivia Hope, do you think I should let your friend tick number 49? I don't think she technically asked a stranger now, did she?'

I'm about to answer, when Isabella leans out of the booth grabbing a passing waiting.

'Excuse me, would you like to go out with me?'

The waiter looks to Josh for a clue as to why some random girl is asking him out, Josh very subtly shakes his head. Isabella has her back to Josh now, so doesn't see this. He must like her, I was stupid for thinking he'd choose me.

'Umm, thanks but... I have a girlfriend.'

'Too bad, thanks anyway!'

Isabella smiles broadly at the waiter before turning back towards us, ticking 49 with her initial next to it.

'Your turn next Livs, you grab the next one. Josh doesn't count now we know his name.'

'I think I'll wait thanks Iz. They'll think we're complete sluts, especially when we already have a waiter sitting with us!'

'I think Olivia has a point. Also, asking out one of my colleagues in front of me is bad enough, don't make it two or I'll never hear the end of it. I have a reputation to keep up with you know!'

Izzy and I both tut and shake our heads at him, I can't work out if he's for real or not. He's gorgeous and I'm sure he's not short of female attention. But I can't help but hope this is an act because he seems like a nice guy, and funny, if it's not for real. If he's being serious, then he's gorgeous but arrogant, and that's not a good combination.

'So have you got your tickets for The Blue Man Group yet? Are you seeing them today or tomorrow?'

Isabella and I exchange confused glances, and Josh slaps his forehead in mock despair.

'Oh come on girls! This is one of the things we're famous for! It's not just all theme parks you know.'

'Ooh wait, I have heard of them! They mime and stuff with colourful paint in a blue studio and they're dressed in blue, right?'

'That's the basics I suppose. It's good to see one of you has done your homework. What about you Isabella, have you heard of them?'

Izzy looks slightly put out now; I want to reach my hand out to her for support. I suddenly feel so protective of her, she really is looking poorly today but she hides it well. Anyone that doesn't know her would just think she had a late night last night, but I know the awful truth.

'Actually Joshua, I didn't have a chance to do much research before we started our journey. I was rather busy, so Livs kindly organised the trip. But if you are that bothered, feel free to write us a list of "must do's" for Florida. We're quite good at following lists now.'

Josh grabs our list from the table and scans it, getting out a pen and a notepad from his apron pocket.

'Okay, well number 33 – Touch an iceberg. I would advise you to go to the Titanic Experience on International Drive; it's only about an hour for the tour. You may not get to touch a real iceberg but it's the closest you're going to get in Florida. For number 37 – Take a hot air balloon ride, there's an amazing sunrise hot air balloon ride; I've done it a few times because the sights are just stunning. It's about 3 hours, but you have to be there for 5.30am, if you can cope with that.'

Josh is frantically writing down his ideas as he talks, it takes him longer to write than it does for him to talk so he's quiet for a moment as he finishes writing; his tongue poking out, clearly concentrating.

'Huh, I guess that could work for number 40 as well, because they give a glass of champagne, and maybe even 38 – get drunk on champagne, depending on how much you girls can handle. Actually, are you even old enough to drink?'

'Of course we are! We're almost twenty-one!'

Isabella answers his question indignantly, before thinking about where we are.

'When do you turn 21? You know that's the legal drinking age here, right?'

'Yeah, Izzy meant in England we've been drinking for years. We both turn 21 next Thursday, that's the reason we're here. So we can turn 21 but feel 18 again by celebrating legally drinking again.'

Josh looks from me to Isabella, a slight look of confusion on his face.

'Are you twins? I thought you were just friends, not sisters!'

'We're unrelated sisters; born on the same day, in the same hospital but to different mothers.'

'Do you have the same Dad?'

'Josh!!' Isabella and I shout this in unison, causing Josh to laugh at the outrage he's caused.

'Calm down, I was only asking. What do you have planned for your birthday?'

'We're going to Sea World during the day and then we're going out drinking in the evening'

'Okay, how about you let my mate and I take you out and show you the best clubs and bars in town?'

Isabella and I look to each other for confirmation, both of us clearly finding it hard to hide our excitement.

'That would be kind of you. So, what we should we do this afternoon?'

'Oh yeah sorry Olivia, I forgot about your list. Well, as you're already in Universal, I'd suggest going to see the Blue Man Group. If it's too late to get tickets, then watch a couple of shows, or maybe go and enjoy the reclining chairs at the cinema. It's the hottest part of the day and I don't want either of you to burn.'

'Gee, thanks dad. It's not like we can't look after ourselves in the sun.'

Josh looks momentarily wounded by Isabella's comment, before smiling and continuing with his list.

'You have to go to Downtown Disney and see "La Nouba" show, which is the Cirque Du Soleil. Umm, okay, number 86 – visit the space centre. I guess you mean the Kennedy Space Centre? Either way, you must do that. Obviously you have to go on the Everglades Airboat Safari. Oh, and you should go on a helicopter tour of Orlando, that would work for 88. You get to go over Disney, Universal Studios, Sea World and many others. They do some trips where you can plan your route yourself.'

Josh pauses to stare at us, clearly wondering why we're laughing at him.

'Sorry Josh, it's just the way you say "route", it sounds so foreign and funny with your accent.'

I feel I should apologise for both of us, as I know Isabella won't.

'Oh yeah, laugh at the guy that's helping! Nice one, remember you're the foreigners here. Anyway, as I was saying, you should go to one of our beaches, my favourite is Miami Beach. For number 84 – Do the touristy things for each place. If the options I've already given don't work, then you should go for an Orlando City Sightseeing Tour. It's a full day exploring the city and our lakes. The last thing I can think of is my favourite, go for a meal at Medieval Times; it's amazing to eat whilst watching horse tricks and jousting. '

Josh hands me his list, clearly not trusting Isabella with it; at the bottom, is his phone number.

'Right, my break is well and truly over so I'll leave you to it. Hopefully you'll pop in and see me tomorrow when you're back, but just in case, here's my cell number. Give me a call to arrange your birthday.'

'Thanks Josh.' Izzy and I say this in unison again.

Josh stands up, smiling at us before giving us each a quick peck on the cheek and leaving without turning back.

'He's mine!'

Izzy and I laugh, look at us both claiming him like he's a prize.

##  Chapter Two

'Livs, wake up! We're twenty one! Happy Birthday'

I force my eyes open. Isabella is practically sat on top of me, as soon as she sees my eyes open she starts bouncing around like a small, excited child.

'Okay, I'm awake.' I groan, barely recognising the grunting noise escaping my mouth.

I rub my eyes and drag my body into a sitting position, knocking Isabella off me and onto the bed.

'Happy Birthday Izzy! What time is it?'

Izzy rolls onto her hands and knees and bounces around on the bed, her skimpy nightdress leaving very little to the imagination.

I've always been jealous of Isabella's body; she has the perfect hourglass figure. Her large breasts balance her beautiful curves and sexy hips perfectly. Her brown hair looks amazing, even though she's only just woken up and hasn't brushed it yet, it's naturally wavy but also looks good straightened. Isabella's hair is longer than mine, going halfway down her back; whereas mine only just flows past my shoulders. I'd always kept my golden blonde locks in a choppy bob, around my jaw line, until Isabella suggested I grow it. She was right of course, with a few layers and the occasional set of low lights to add dimensions. It's made me look much closer to my age than I did before, with my athletic build making me look young.

Isabella's looks have given her confidence, without a doubt. She knows she's beautiful and she knows how to use it to her advantage but never in a bad way. She thrives on the attention she gets, but unlike some of the pretty popular girls at school who turn into bitches and put down other girls; Isabella never would. But soon she'll lose her amazing body and her good looks, she'll become weathered and old looking. Isabella is the most amazing person I've ever met, when I think about what she's been cursed with – It breaks my heart.

'Please don't cry. This is a happy day Livs'

Oh God, I hadn't realised I was crying. Isabella is so brave; I have to be strong for her. She deserves the best birthday ever.

'I'm sorry Iz. Right, I'm finished now. What time's the bus?'

'Don't be mad, but I got excited and woke you a little early. The bus isn't for another couple of hours but I thought we could go for a nice little walk, and maybe get breakfast somewhere other than the hotel?'

Isabella flutters her eyelashes at me, the way she did the first time we met Josh.

'Breakfast and a walk sound good, but what do you mean it's a couple of hours until the bus? The bus goes at 8am, which means it must be 6am!'

I'm met with more eyelash fluttering, and this time I swear she actually pulls down her nightgown slightly to expose just a little extra breast. I wonder when she'll remember this won't work on me.

'It's almost six Livs. Now come on, get up! Maybe I could see if the guys want to meet us for breakfast'

The mention of Josh works as a good distraction, there's no point in being mad at her. It's happened now, I'm awake; it just means a few extra hours of birthday!

Since meeting Josh at The Hard Rock Hotel Café six days ago, our holiday has definitely improved. We took his advice and went to watch The Blue Man Group, and he was right, it was so worth it. I thought it was a lot of money to watch a bunch of Smurfs, but how wrong I was!

The next day Isabella and I both found ourselves dressing up to go back to Universal Studios in the hopes of seeing Josh again. We wanted to go to the Hard Rock for breakfast but decided it might make us look desperate. We held out until 12, spending the morning arguing about which of us should get to ask him out. Eventually, we decided we'd just be ourselves and let him choose; if of course, he likes either of us. He may have just been trying to earn a good tip yesterday.

Personally, I think his reaction when we arrived proves he genuinely likes at least one of us. He had such a sincere smile as he asked us if we were playing it cool. We giggled and told him about The Blue Man Group, and that we'd watched the shows he'd told us too, like The Twister and The Indiana Jones Stunt Show. Isabella told him we weren't sure what to do next, so Josh said he and his friend would take us for a tour on Sunday when they were off work. We accepted as nonchalantly as we could possibly manage, but we spent the next couple of days buzzing.

When Sunday finally arrived and we got to see Josh again, we were pleasantly surprised to find his friend Ollie was the complete polar opposite of him. Josh is funny, cheeky, gorgeous but also a bit arrogant; it suits him, but it's not usually a good trait. Ollie has a serious job at a newspaper company, he's their lead journalist, compared to Josh who works as a waiter and has no plans to change. Ollie appears to be very smart and worldly wise but doesn't preach. He's sensible but still has a sense of humour.

Whilst we were exploring and sightseeing, we discovered Josh is twenty four and Ollie is twenty six. They met when Josh briefly dated Ollie's younger sister; who then became a bit obsessed and slightly stalked Josh. Josh was forced to go to her house and tell her parents what was happening, just to get her to leave him alone. Her parents were out but her big brother was happy to help, after laughing at Josh for being a pussy about the whole thing. Josh was very embarrassed to hear the entire story recounted to a couple of near strangers. He quickly pointed out this happened about eight years ago, and he could now handle any woman; and Claire, the girl, was now a very successful school councillor – Helping prevent girls from getting in the same situation.

'Josh is refusing to get out of bed yet. He wants to stick to the original plan of meeting us at Sea World at 9am.'

Isabella seems to have a homing device for Josh. The second we get there she's spotted him, and is dragging us over to him and Ollie.

'So, what's the deal phoning me at 6am girls?

'Please excuse my friends appalling manners. What he means to say is, good morning ladies and a very happy birthday to you both. According to our law, you're now adults capable of drinking.'

Josh has the decency to look embarrassed.

'Erm yeah, happy birthday, come here.'

First he beckons to me, and gives me a kiss on each cheek before practically pushing me into Ollie to do the same. I can't help but notice Josh gives Izzy a kiss on each cheek and a quick peck on the mouth. He also doesn't push her away, instead keeping her close.

It wasn't like this the last time we all went out. Last time we were just a group of friends hanging out, however this time it looks like the guys have claimed their girls, and Josh has picked my gorgeous friend over me. Who could blame him really? I just feel sorry for Ollie who's clearly been dragged along to keep me out of their way.

'So Livs, what do you want to see first? This is your part of the birthday celebrations.'

We've come to Sea World because I love animals, I'd quite like to be a vet but don't have the qualifications. I was going to work in a rescue centre but mum was worried I'd want to bring everything home, and to be honest, she was probably right. Eventually I'll do something with animals, I just have to decide exactly what and get some qualifications.

'Umm, can we start with the penguins?'

Isabella smiles at me before searching on the map, the boys both gawp at me.

'Penguins?! Really?' Josh sounds genuinely shocked.

'You don't want to start with something better? You know they're quite famous for having a killer whale here, you may have heard of him? His name is Shamu. Or we could go feed dolphins?' Ollie obviously also doesn't understand the penguin appeal either.

'Listen boys, my best friend would like to see the penguins first. We'll see everything else later; we'll see the shows too. Olivia is going to work with animals when she grows up.'

The boys seem to accept this, and lead the way. It's only when I hear someone else say "when she grows up" that I cringe. It makes me sound so young and immature, I must start planning my own life rather than just tagging on to Isabella's.

'Why aren't you working with animals now then Olivia? You're not like Josh are you? You know, just waiting for a decent job to fall into your lap, watching life fly by?'

'Hey!'

Ollie turns his attention away from me, and onto his now grumpy friend.

'Sorry mate, no offence intended.'

Josh shrugs his shoulders; clearly this comment is like water off a ducks back to him. Then he puts his arm around Isabella and leads her off slightly so they're out of earshot. I want to scream at him, don't do that! Choose me! But I don't for two reasons: one, I love Izzy and two, how much of a weirdo would I look then, how embarrassing.

I wonder if Ollie knows he's just here to help keep me away so Josh can make a move on Isabella.

'Olivia?'

'Sorry Ollie, what did you say?'

Ollie gives me a wry smile, and shakes his head slightly.

'No... nothing important; here are the penguins, although you may want to take your sunglasses off, it's quite dark inside. '

Instead of a door, the entrance has large, heavy, plastic flaps that you push your way through. Ollie held them open for me to squeeze through, and as I pass him he puts his hand on the small of my back; only for a split second, but enough to stop me in my tracks. I don't want to sound bigheaded but I really hope he doesn't fancy me. I really like him and he's a really nice guy, but he's far too old or me, and not my type. I usually go for the surfer type, Josh would be my ideal man, but obviously he's way out of my league.

Looks wise, I'd say Josh is a 10/10 for me, although he'd have to shave the ridiculous stubble he insists on having. A lot of the guys in my old job used to have it and when I asked why, they'd tell me its designer stubble for men who are too lazy to shave. I just think it's vile. On the other hand, Ollie is clean shaven, or at least he has been on the two occasions we've met. He has his hair quite short and spiky, I think if he let it grow slightly and wore it in a messy surfer style like Josh, he'd look much better. Ollie does have stunning eyes though; they're quite a vibrant green with the tiniest specks of brown. I've noticed when he's excited about something, they kind of sparkle, like they're the key to his soul.

'Are you okay Livs? You keep drifting off.'

'I'm fine thanks. Just, you know, it feels a bit weird being away from my mum on my birthday. Oh and Ollie, please don't call me Livs. Isabella is the only one who's allowed to call me it and that's only because she couldn't pronounce Olivia when we were little.'

'I guess it's a bit early to call your mum. Don't worry, Josh and I will make this the best birthday for our favourite girls. Oh, and understood about the Livs thing. Believe it or not, I used to hate being called Ollie, it was always Oliver or Clarkey but I grew out of that!'

My look of intrigue makes him smile broadly, causing his beautiful eyes to twinkle slightly.

'My surname is Clark. At college all my mates used to call each other by our last names. Don't ask! We actually thought we were the cool guys.'

'Wait, you call university college right? So that would have made you like nineteen or twenty yeah?' Also, as I've only just learnt your full name, that means you could still be classed as a stranger. So can I cross off number 49 of my list if I say I asked you out?'

Ollie stops walking and turns to face me, his eyes staring intensely at mine. In the background I can see a conveyer belt that takes you past a massive tank of penguins and I want to push past him and run to it. But I don't think that'd be very appropriate, given the sudden seriousness of the situation.

'Are you asking?'

'Umm, well obviously you'll say no but I really want to tick it off. And I dread to think what kind of strange person Izzy will have me asking if it's left up to her.'

'Would I say no?'

'Well yeah of course. I mean we don't know each other, there's a big age gap and I'm just on holiday... well sort of. Anyway, shall we catch up with Isabella and Josh now?'

'Sure, why not.'

Ollie breaks eye contact and marches off, causing me to have to jog slightly to keep up with him.

'Are you both excited about having your first legal drinks?'

Josh is humouring us with our re-living our 18th plan. In honour of turning 18 again, Isabella and I are both wearing the same outfits we wore originally. This worked well for Izzy, who's always had impeccable taste. Me on the other hand, not so good. I hate wearing skirts and dresses, living in my jeans and shorts. So when I was bullied into wearing a dress for the occasion, I let Isabella pick, promising I'd wear whatever she chose for me. So I'm now sitting on the bus to Down Town Disney wearing a candyfloss pink corset puff dress. The top of the dress is fitted and actually shows off what little chest I have, but it's at the waist where it all goes wrong. The layers upon layers of pink frills building up a nice round ball which blows up at mere sight of wind. I'm hoping I'll be safe from that here, but it didn't work so well in Cornwall.

I have a white shrug and white plastic "statement" jewellery, although I still don't quite know what their statement is. To top it off, I have a pair of white stilettos that make me the same height as Ollie, still shorter than Josh. But believe me when I say they won't last long, I'll soon be putting them in my bag and swapping them for my white flip flops. That's right; I have a good theme going.

On the other hand, Isabella has the shortest black mini dress on that hugs her in all the right places. She has black stilettos but can walk in them as if she were barefoot. She has gold accessories and looks even more stunning than usual, the black colour of her dress just accentuates her tan.

'We can't wait, can we Livs?'

Three sets of eyes fall on me and I feel my eyes well up.

'See! Look how excited she is!'

The boys don't look convinced but turn to face forward again. No doubt unsure of what to do when a woman cries. Isabella elbows me in the ribs, before whispering 'Don't you dare, I don't want any bad memories for today.'

'Okay. We're here now, follow me. I'm taking us to Portobello; it's one of my favourite places and looks out onto Lake Buena Lagoon. It's a renowned Italian, most people have to book at least 180 days in advance, but luckily for you I have friends in high places.' Ollie announces.

'Yeah well, if you want to eat for 50% off, I could take you to the Hard Rock Café because I have friends in high places there!'

Josh sounds like a jealous child, and when we get there I see why. It's the most beautiful place I've ever seen. When we get inside, we decide to order some drinks and I see why it's so exclusive. They charge $9.95 for a cocktail and $25 for a bowl of pasta; for these prices I'd be able to redecorate a few times. Ollie tells us it's his treat; apparently he can claim it on his expenses as long as he writes an article about it with a couple of nice photos. I still feel a little guilty about it, but it would appear not guilty enough to turn down an Acqua Di Mare, and one turned into a few. By the time we had to leave to go watch The Cirque Du Soliel, I was surprised to no longer feel the pain of my towering heels.

Cirque Du Soleil was the most amazing experience, I thought I'd much prefer Sea World and was just doing this bit for Isabella; but wow. I wish I hadn't had so many cocktails so I'd have been able to appreciate it a bit more. When the guys had turned up at our hotel in suits, I'd thought they were a bit overdressed. But after tonight, with the stunning meal, followed by the awesome show, I feel its Izzy and me who in fact were underdressed.

We'd been lucky with our seats, being about halfway up the centre; meaning we could see both the high and low wire. The performers came out and into the aisles so everybody could see as much as they possibly could. They had acrobats, jugglers, dancers, bicyclist and the wires... so there was definitely something for everyone, even clowns! There was a live orchestra, singers the lot. I mean I've been to the circus loads of times, but this doesn't compare in the slightest.

By the time the show had finished, the alcohol had worn off slightly so as it was only 10.30pm, we went in search of some nightclubs. Unfortunately for us, we hadn't realised that Thursday nights are Cast Nights, where all Disney employees get in for free, so it was super crowded. We started in Motion, which is a club that just plays top 40 hits, it's got a great atmosphere but we got tired of just hearing the same songs. So we headed to a place called Jellyrolls, it was quite quiet to start with, but after about half an hour it was full of people out for a good time. It's actually nice to go to an over 21's bar. We felt really sophisticated. They have piano duels and you can request any song you like! It was amazing and a great atmosphere, I even got up and danced on stage.

The only slight down point of the evening was Isabella and Josh getting together. I could see it was going to happen and I'm sure he'll make her happy, and let's face it, he was out of my league anyway.

'Night Livs. Love you.'

Isabella has just returned from brushing her teeth and climbed into bed with me, instead of crawling all the way to the other end of the room to her own bed.

'Sweet dreams Iz, love you too.'

Even as I say it, I know she's already asleep.

##  Chapter Three

'I still can't believe you kissed a girl!'

'Okay, thanks for reminding me, now leave it okay. I don't really want those particular memories to come back to me.'

'Oh come on Livs, it's exciting. When we put that on our list I never thought you'd do it, let alone be the first to do it!'

So apparently, last night after a few too many cocktails I managed to fall off the stage and when a very kind woman about my age stepped in to help Ollie pick me up, I felt the need to thank her by kissing her. This is why I don't drink.

'I think Ollie was upset you kissed her rather than him.'

'Izzy, my head is still banging, can we not talk about this?'

We've decided to work through our list today, crossing off some of the smaller, easier things. So far I've managed to cross off "Ask out a stranger" Isabella decided Ollie didn't count as we'd already seen him before. So first thing this morning, when I was disgusting and possibly smelling of vomit, Izzy pointed to a sexy man in the animal shop and forced me to ask him out. To give him his due, he was very kind in his decline.

We also both successfully completed number 7 – hug a stranger. We were slightly inventive with this one, making signs that said "Free Hugs" we'd seen people do this the previous year at Glastonbury Music Festival. It worked a treat and progressed nicely to number 85 – talk to a stranger. We decided not to count Josh for this one as technically, he spoke to us.

My stranger was very nice, stopping for a quick chat before making his excuses to leave and carrying on with his daily tasks. Unfortunately, Isabella's had felt she'd lead him on, he thought he was onto a sure thing. So when he tried to kiss her, he was very confused when she shoved him away and this made him quite angry.

'I can't believe we had to call the Mall Cops to get that guy to leave you alone!'

Isabella looks slightly embarrassed before giggling.

'I can't help being this beautiful!'

'Yeah but you could try covering some of it up though'

I know this is harsh and I don't mean it in a nasty way. But seeing Isabella looking down at her low cut top, and voluptuous chest, I realise I may have gone too far.

'It's hard to keep them hidden! You're just jealous anyway!'

Isabella snaps, and I worry she's serious until I see her smirk.

'You're right of course my love. So what shall we do now because we've definitely completed number 70 – Shop until we drop, I don't know how we're going to get all these bags on a bus, let alone on a plane. '

'I think you have a point there, it might be time to airmail some stuff home; especially if we want to go to Vegas soon. Maybe you could phone Ollie and see if he'll pick us up? He did say to let him know if we needed anything today.'

I think Isabella feels guilty that Josh chose her because she keeps bringing up Ollie, and seems desperate to get us together. When we drunkenly told Ollie and Josh our plans for today, he'd given me his business card and said anything at all and we should call him.

'I don't know Izzy, we're meant to be meeting them in an hour, would it really be fair to get him to pick us up, drop us to the hotel to change and then pick us up again?'

'Just phone him, he can always say no.'

'Okay fine, I'll phone him. Now stop putting it off and go chat to that beggar over there so we can cross off number 57. I'll be over in a sec.'

'Thank you so much for picking us up Ollie. You actually saved us from a crazy beggar! We went to chat to him and decided to each give him our last dollar so we could cross off number 43 as well as 57, and get all our homeless ones out of the way. But he was so excited people were speaking to him that he wouldn't let us leave and we've already called the Mall Cops once today!'

Ollie looks slightly amused as he helps us pack our many shopping bags into the boot, or trunk as he calls it.

'You're more than welcome Olivia, it means I get out of the office on time for once. I was thinking about it on the drive over, and wonder how you feel about getting ready at my house, rather than me taking you to the hotel just to come back again? I have a guest shower room, and judging by your bags, I'd say you've something to change into if needs be.'

I look to the back seat where Isabella is frantically searching through her handbag, she pulls out her make up bag and nods her agreement. She needs more make up now to bring her face back to the natural beauty it was before. Before Ollie arrived, she told me I was to sit in the front seat and get to know him better. I definitely think she's feeling guilty about getting with Josh, knowing I liked him too.

'Yeah that sounds like a great idea. We were feeling guilty about you having to make a couple of journeys anyway. Shall I text Josh and ask him to meet us there?'

Isabella looks hopeful as she asks this, bless her, any excuse to talk to or about Josh and she's happy.

'Nah that's okay, I'll talk to him while you get ready, unless you want to specifically talk to him?'

Ollie catches her eye in the rear-view mirror, and I notice her solemnly shake her head.

'Okay, we're here. Do you need all your bags or do you want to leave them in the car?'

Luckily, Isabella and I had already decided on our new outfits for tonight, so we only needed one bag each; we'd cleverly already put our accessories in the bags.

As Ollie leads us up his concrete pathway, I'm taken aback by the size of his house. He must notice both mine and Isabella's reaction because he quickly chuckles and explains.

'I've turned it into two flats. I rent the bottom one out to holiday makers for possibly a little bit too much money, which means I don't have to pay mortgage myself for most of the year. I'm currently living alone upstairs, but one of my work friends is moving in with me on Monday as it's a two bedroom flat. So that will help me save for a new house, then I can rent both flats and not have to pay either mortgage; I almost have enough saved now.'

'Wow, that's a brilliant idea. I bet you could earn quite a good living from that, especially living so close to International Drive. If we win any money on our scratch cards, you should spend it on property here Livs.'

'You could buy a place together, especially if it's a joint win.'

Ollie is completely unaware of this slightly flippant comment but it hits me deep down in my stomach. When we were younger Isabella and I had talked about getting a house together, but now we know that probably won't ever happen. Isabella is seriously ill and will need lots of care once we've finished travelling. But of course we aren't allowed to talk about it, no matter how bad she gets; she just shrugs it off.

Blissfully unaware of my upset, Ollie leads us up a specially built outdoor staircase. He's made the entrance to his flat very secure, with a lock on the door at the bottom, and a lock on the door at the top. I guess you can't be too careful when you're renting to different people every week or so.

'Okay, you'll have to excuse the mess; I wasn't expecting guests and was planning on cleaning this weekend, ready for Pete's arrival on Monday.'

Isabella and I have both had our experiences of messy boy rooms, so it's safe to say she was as surprised as I was when we entered the cosy little lounge.

'Really, you call this messy? You should see our hotel room, or Olivia's bedroom at home for that matter!'

I cringe as my face heats, blushing crimson. I can always rely on Isabella to embarrass me.

'Ooh, I may have to witness this for myself.'

Hearing this, I force myself to look up. As soon as I do, I notice Ollie's intent stare on me. My stomach does a small flip, I know what this means. I may not want to admit it, but clearly I'm attracted to him. I don't get these butterflies over just anybody.

'So Ollie, where is your bathroom? It takes me a while to look this beautiful you know!'

I love Isabella for breaking whatever tension there just was between me and Ollie. I think she sensed my distress and did it on purpose, but with her I'll never know.

'Of course, sorry, where are my manners. I have a guest shower room next to my kitchen and a small en-suite in my bedroom, so it's up to you. You can use a shower each, Izzy you can use the spare room to change in, Olivia you can use my room. Or you can take turns in the shower and both get changed in the spare room. I need to shower and a quick change of clothes too, but I only need five minutes.'

For some reason, Ollie seems to be rambling slightly; I think he may be a little nervous.

'Great, thanks Ollie. I'll use the shower in the guest shower room; Olivia can use yours and then join me in the spare room so you can get ready.'

'Okay, sounds like a good plan. I'll get you some orange juice and lemonade and a plate of cookies and put them in the spare room for when you're ready.'

Ollie leads us both into our respective bathrooms, before heading into the kitchen.

As soon as I'm left alone in Ollie's bedroom, I can't help but take a look around. I turn the shower on so it'll sound like I'm in it, and then quietly open his wardrobe doors. Oh dear, this man colour co-ordinates his clothes, he also has almost as many shoes as I do! I start to undress and wander over to the bed, the urge to smell his pillow overwhelms me... mmm, and it smells so nice. I'm about to open the draw beside his bed when I hear the door rattle. I freeze, not even managing to shout out.

'Oh Olivia!'

Ollie covers his eyes in a flash but I know he's seen too much. I'm standing on the opposite side of the room to the bathroom, wearing nothing but my very small, black thong which leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. My clothes, including my bra, are scattered around his bedroom floor. Both of us appear to be frozen to the spot; I'm standing with my hands covering my pert little breasts, staring at Ollie. Ollie is halfway in the room, one hand on the door handle, one hand over his eyes. He could easily take one step back and close the door, but he doesn't.

'I heard the water; I thought you were in the shower? I was going to choose what to wear quickly while you were showering.'

Ollie is stuttering and dancing from one foot to the other, he looks mortified.

'I was just about to... Just let me grab my clothes and run to the bathroom and I'll be out of your way.'

'No, no I'll leave you to it. I'll just grab my phone charger to call Josh; I can grab some clothes once you're ready.'

Ollie takes another step into his bedroom, dropping his hand from his eyes and once again seeing my naked body.

'Ollie!'

He rushes out of the bedroom, slamming the door in the process.

'I'm so sorry, I completely forgot! I was just going to grab my phone charger to leave you in peace, that's all I swear!'

Ollie calls out his apology through the safety of the closed door.

'Its fine, I'm going to the shower now, and as long as you promise not to open the bathroom door you can have access to your bedroom'

'Okay, sounds like a deal.'

##  Chapter Four

'So, is it really worth paying an extra $10 per person?'

Isabella and I have been posing for photos next to statues of knights in shining armour. They may not be real, but we're about to watch the real thing whilst we eat our tea, so we feel number 97 can be ticked off.

'Babe, Medieval Times is totally awesome; it should have been on your list in the first place. Oh, talking of the list; I've booked us all in for a hot air balloon ride to see the sunrise tomorrow. Ollie, you may want to pull a sickie for this. I was thinking after that, we could head to Everglades and The Kennedy Space Centre? Make a full day of it.'

'Wow Josh, that sounds amazing. But don't you think that's quite a lot to do in one day?'

Josh looks a bit hurt by my reaction and Isabella is now glowering at me. I know she agrees with me, and I know she'll be too tired to do all of it in one day; but she's afraid of offending her new boyfriend.

'Mate, Livs has a point. I'm up for the hot air balloon, but it's too much for one day. How about we get up early, do that, I go back to work for the rest of the day, and then we can all meet for dinner at the All You Can Eat place. That's another off the list, and we can do the rest another day?'

'I do have a point, of course, but there are two flaws with that. One, don't call me Livs and two; we're going to Discovery Cave to swim with dolphins tomorrow.'

I don't know what it is about Ollie but he makes me feel confident. I can say anything to him.

'Can we talk about this after? We paid extra to get in first and be in the front row seats, and we're now wasting time and missing the experience.' Josh grabs my wrist, and slightly more carefully takes Isabella's hand leading us towards the massive stadium.

We're still almost first in and near the front, even with our setbacks. We're directed to the very first row of the blue section and given a blue flag and a blue paper crown each. There's a large arena in the centre which has sawdust or something covering the ground, and a thick barrier all around the edge at about waist height; so we can still see everything that happens, but in safety.

Isabella and I are sitting in the middle with Josh to her left and Ollie to my right. I feel like they're all trying to set us up, possibly including Ollie himself. That makes me sound really big headed, but it's just the feeling I've been getting.

Laid out in front of us is a paper place mat with Medieval Times written at the top. There's a photo of a gorgeous white stallion across the centre, and a blue border along the bottom with blue knight written in bold, just in case we forgot who we're voting for. We also have a metal plate and a metal bowl, but no cutlery.

Once everyone is settled, the waitress who introduces herself as our wench brings us a beaker of ice with some coke dripped over. She also fills our metal bowls with tomato soup and some yummy garlic bread. Ollie laughs when I ask how I'm supposed to eat my soup without a spoon.

'They didn't have cutlery in the Medieval Times; you just pick up the bowl and tip it into your mouth like this.'

Ollie demonstrates, but ends up spilling soup down his chin.

'I get the cutlery thing, but why have we been given a glass of coke then, surely they didn't have that either; we should just have water.'

Ollie quickly wipes the soup from his face, I think he's going to argue with me, or at least try to reason with me; but he gets interrupted by cheers all around us when the blue knight rides past, throwing carnations to the beautiful ladies in our section. Josh catches one and helps Isabella fix it in her hair. I can't help but feel a bit jealous, which in turn upsets me. How can I feel jealous of Isabella?

'Did you enjoy it then Livs? The horses were amazing, especially when that big white one jumped completely off the floor. Oh, and the jousting! Also, wasn't our knight really hot? I can't believe he gave me a flower!'

'It was awesome, it was just a shame our knight lost. But it was so worth it, especially being sat right at the front.'

'I've wrecked my dress though, I didn't realise we'd be expected to eat half a chicken, ribs and a jacket potato with our hands. Look at the grease smeared down me!'

We decided to stay out and have a few drinks after the show had finished, we are now in a fairly quiet bar on the outskirts of Kissimmee. Isabella and I decided we didn't want alcohol, and Ollie is driving; so Josh begrudgingly decided not to be the only drinker.

'Here we go ladies, sodas all round.'

Josh has a hint of sarcasm to his tone as he places the drinks down. Ollie follows him over with his and Josh's drink, winking at me as he hands Josh his pint of coke.

'So what's the plan for tomorrow then?'

Josh looks eagerly from Isabella to me and back again.

'Well, we'll all go for the hot air balloon ride, then Livs and I are going to Discovery Cove where you two are welcome to join us. '

'That sounds nice, but like I said earlier I really need to go back to work after the balloon ride, and I suggest you do the same Josh. You've pulled a few too many sickies lately.'

Josh looks into his coke, swirling the ice around. He looks like a kid who's just been told off by his dad. He must know Ollie has a point; he just doesn't want to admit it.

'But the girls list says to pull a sickie when you're not sick, I'm just helping with the list. Get it out babe.'

Josh holds his hand out to Isabella, waiting to be able to point and prove he's right. Isabella hands him the list, keen to help him out.

'Well actually, the list is just for Isabella and I, we've already completed number 47 so there's no need for anybody to miss work. We're on a tight schedule as it is.'

Josh again looks slightly perturbed as he sulkily takes a swig of his drink.

'How come you're on a tight schedule? I didn't think you had a leaving date? Also, if Josh and I are helping you complete the list, doesn't that mean we get to tick things off for ourselves? '

My attention is instantly drawn away from Josh. I look from Ollie with his questions, to Isabella to gauge her reaction. Why did I have to say tight schedule? We haven't discussed the reasons we'd give the boys if they asked. I'm desperately searching for something to say, and then I hear Isabella's quiet but strong voice at my side.

'The list is for me. Olivia has given up everything to make this the best year of our lives because the truth is, it's almost certain to be my last year alive. That's if I even make it to the end of the year.'

I'm gobsmacked. I can't believe she just announced that so matter of fact. I look up from my lap and realise that both of the boys are staring at my best friend as if she's just ripped her clothes off and jumped on the table screaming she's a man.

I feel Isabella take my hand and suddenly any memories of horse tricks and hot knights are wiped from my mind. I feel the tears sliding down my face with ever increasing pace, and I'm powerless to stop them. I bite my tongue in an effort to calm myself; I need to be strong for Isabella. I feel my chest heave as I let out a large sob. If I can't be strong for her, then I can't cry in front of her at the very least. I turn to look at her and she gives me a knowing smile as she lets go of my hand, allowing me to flee the bar.

'Isabella wants to know if she can cross off 93 for you.'

I look up from the bench that I managed to get for myself, usually an impossible feat in America. The benches are always full; it would appear that even the fattest, laziest American will depart their resting spot when a small, blonde girl starts to hyperventilate through an avalanche of tears. Through my sore, bloodshot eyes I see Ollie standing in front of me, he looks like a lost child. He's concentrating on locking and unlocking his fingers, avoiding eye contact. I feel guilty, I mean what right do I have to be sitting here falling apart when Isabella has to hold it all together and go into the gory details. I've not been with her when she's told people before, and we don't really talk about it. So to hear her tell her brand new boyfriend and his friend makes it suddenly seem very real, very final.

'I guess it's safe to say she can cross it off, I'd say that's definitely what constitutes sobbing uncontrollably in a public place. I bet she's all smiles and making jokes right?'

Ollie looks up and as his eyes meet mine, he takes a sharp intake of breath and I know I must look a state.

'That friend of yours is very brave, you should be very proud of her... but don't be afraid to cry. After all, you have the thought of continuing life without her in the not so distant future. At least she knows she'll be at peace and out of pain soon.'

His words hit me like a block of cement. He's right; it won't be long before I'll be all alone. How on earth will I survive without her? The longest we've been apart is a couple of days and even then we text or phoned each other. We even went on family holidays together. I start to howl again and sensing he's done wrong, Ollie rushes over, embracing me tightly.

'Shit, I'm so sorry Livs! I don't cope well in situations like this.'

This time when he calls me Livs, I find it comforting rather than annoying.

'You don't need to say anything Ollie; please can you just hold me? I think we should give Isabella and Josh a bit of time to talk anyway. I'm sure he'll have questions, and lots of them at that.'

Ollie breathes a sigh of relief, pulling me closer to him. I know the tears have stopped for the time being, and it feels really nice to be this close to another human being, to him. As I rest my head against his chest, I feel him gently kiss the top of my head.

Ollie affectionately rubs his hands down my arm, his fingers making little circles as they go. I don't know what comes over me but I feel my face lift up towards him. As our lips meet, it's like an out of body experience. I'm hovering above us as Ollie runs his fingers through my hair, the kiss soft and gentle to begin with, then passionate. I put a hand to his cheek and feel a single tear glide down. As I pull away from him, he gives me a sad smile and takes hold of my hand.

'I'm sorry; I shouldn't have done that Livs. I don't want you to think I'm taking advantage of you'

I stand up keeping hold of his hand, pulling him up in doing so.

'I think I initiated that so it's not taking advantage at all. Well, unless you feel I took advantage of you.'

Ollie shakes his head and smiles at me.

'I'll let you off this time Miss Hope, but next time you might not be so lucky.'

'I'll keep that in mind Oliver, now let's go back in shall we before Isabella thinks I've jumped in front of a bus or something.'

Ollie stops walking which jerks me back slightly as he'd been allowing himself to be dragged.

'I don't think that's funny to joke about, do you?'

'No, you're right. I take it back.'

'Listen Livs, I think Isabella is an amazing girl and this is so tragic. I don't really know what to say about her situation, I didn't even know a girl her age could get cancer! I want you to know if either of you need anything at all, you know where I am. I really like you Olivia and can't bear to see you sad, so if you ever need a hug or a kiss; just shout and I'll come and find you.'

I'm not sure if he's saying this as a friend or a boyfriend, but either way it's the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me.

'I'll bear that in mind when we're in Vegas or back home.'

As I say this, his smile fades. I'm feeling brave and I want to cross number 29 off, ask honest questions you're afraid to ask.

'Do you like me... as more than a friend?'

Ollie pulls me into a warm embrace and kisses me hungrily. He's running his hands through my hair and then down my body, and resting them on my bum before drawing back slightly.

'Does that answer your question? Because if you're unsure, I can do it again'

I playfully hit him on the chest. That was the most amazing kiss of my life. I think I love him already.

'You're so cheesy! Now come on, let's go get the others... we have an early start tomorrow.'

'Hey! I'm a reporter, cheesy is what we do best and you know you loved it!'

Ollie takes my hand again as we enter the bar. Once back at our table, I almost recoil when I see Isabella and Josh have been crying. As soon as I see her bloodshot eyes I let go of Ollie and rush over to hug her. We cling tightly to each other for quite some time before she breaks the silence.

'Were you and Ollie holding hands? Are you together now?'

I pull her away from me so I can see her face. My brave best friend who never cries or wallows in self-pity is instantly cheered by the thought of romance.

'Erm, yeah I guess we are. Now come on, it's home time.'

Isabella is grinning at me in a slightly crazed way. I try to turn to the boys for some help, but realise Josh is doing the same to Ollie.

'Josh and I would like to spend the night together, but I don't like the thought of leaving you in the hotel alone, how would you feel about that?'

I'm wondering how I can answer that without sounding like a child or spoiling their plans by saying I'd hate to stay on my own in the hotel.

'Listen, as we have to leave at 5am tomorrow, why don't you stay at mine? I have a spare room for you two, Olivia can have my bed and I'll take the sofa.'

We all agree and head back to Ollie's nice, secure flat. I'm excited not to be in the hotel for the night, I feel mean at the prospect of Ollie giving up his bed for me though. So I offer to share, as long as he promises to keep his hands to himself.

'That'll be hard, but I think I can manage it for one night Livs.'

##  Chapter Five

The sound of the alarm beside me wakes me slightly. I'm confused when I gingerly open my eyes and don't recognise the walls of the hotel I've grown so fond of. The next thing I notice is the slightly hairy arm wrapped around my waist, a protective hand on my stomach.

Ollie was going to stick to his word and stay on his side of the bed, not even giving me a goodnight kiss; but it ended up being me who made the move. I felt like such a prude sleeping in his bed with no contact whatsoever. We've literally just got together so I didn't want to go too far, just a goodnight kiss and a cuddle did me just fine; falling asleep in his protective arms felt very comforting after the emotion of the night.

Since Isabella was diagnosed, she's tried to play it down. She doesn't tell people about her illness, she wasn't even going to tell her family when I persuaded her to go for the tests; but luckily she changed her mind and now has lots of support from everyone who knows. I still can't believe she just announced it the way she did last night! Isabella is very secretive about her illness, she doesn't mention when she is in pain and hasn't given anyone enough details to be able to research it. All we know is that Isabella doesn't think she has long left, I don't know if she's been told this or if she's just decided this herself!

'Livs we need to get up now. Do you want the first shower? I'm going to make sure the other two are awake.'

And just like that, I'm wide awake and left alone in Ollie's comfortable king size bed.

It's so annoying, our balloon ride doesn't start until 6.30am, but you have to get there an hour early to see it being inflated and set up. Ollie thinks it'll take about 30 minutes to get there, so we have to leave here just before 5am. To say I'm not a morning person is a massive understatement.

I'm just dragging myself out of bed ready to jump in the shower, when I hear raised voices. I hear Isabella scream and Josh shouting "get out". Before I get a chance to go and see what's happening, Ollie bursts through the bedroom door and practically falls into my lap.

'I knocked on the door but there was no answer, so I thought they were still asleep!'

I can't help but giggle at the high pitch of his voice, he sounds so young, trying to justify his actions.

'What did you see?'

Ollie takes a step closer to me and cups my face in his hands before answering.

'I saw things that will haunt me for life. Things you are far too young to hear about!'

'Oh shut up will you, that's my best friend you're talking about. I don't want to think about her like that! Especially when she'll probably try and tell me about it herself later, well, as soon as you and Josh leave us.'

Ollie stares at me, he's still holding my face and he looks so serious. I can't help but giggle at the look on his face, but also at the thought of him just walking into his spare room and catching them at it. Seeing me laugh seems to calm him slightly, his stern face melts into a warm smile.

'If she starts to talk about it, you're going to have to tell her you don't want to hear, okay?'

I pull his hands off my face and slide them down my body until they reach my hips. I lean my face up towards him, his lips instinctively reach down to meet mine and he kisses me. Pulling me into him, his tongue explores my mouth as our kiss deepens. To help compensate my height, Ollie picks me up allowing me to wrap my arms and legs around his body. Unfortunately we're slightly unbalanced in this stance, so we topple over; landing in a heap on the bed with Ollie lying on me, near enough in the missionary stance.

'Livs, as much as I want to do this, we need to get going soon. Off you go to the shower.'

He says this in a grown up and serious manner, but he's still lying on top of me; so I can't move even if I wanted to. I reach up to kiss him again before pushing him off me. He's right of course, we have a big day ahead and it's time to get up and get on with it.

'I can't believe it's so cold today!'

Isabella and I are huddled together in the field with a thick, red wool blanket wrapped around us. The boys have been helping the balloon staff to inflate the balloon and prepare for the flight; I think they love acting manly.

Other than our birthday where we must have been blessed with the weather, we've not been up and about before 7am; therefore we've always assumed the weather is warm here. How wrong were we? Thank god Ollie keeps a blanket in his boot for emergencies.

'Right, they're ready for us now, come on ladies, take my hand.'

I'm really surprised by the size of the basket. I've never been this close to a hot air balloon, but when you see them in the sky, even when they're quite close, they always look huge. I guess its common sense really, for a basket to be big enough to happily fit quite a few people.

'Right, do you all remember the safety briefing you saw when you arrived?'

I look around at my friends, both old and new, and we all nod our heads, excited to get going. Well, they're excited; I'm praying we'll survive the trip.

'Great! Hop in then.'

The instructor jumps into the basket, before outstretching his hand to me first. I really hate being the smallest sometimes. Ollie lifts me up to help me in, so it would appear I have no option, but to go first. As soon as I'm safely in the basket and I've stopped screaming and hyperventilating, Josh attempts to pick up Isabella.

'Wait! Josh, put me down! I want to take a photo of Livs in there on her own! I must text it to her mum immediately because she'll never believe this.'

I should be offended by this, but to be honest darling Isabella has a point. I think subconsciously since I was a kid, I've tried to avoid doing anything remotely dangerous, for fear of ending up like my dad. I pose for a photo, giving her my most scared but excited smile, before helping her to join me, again posing for photos as we all pile in.

As we take off, I'm struck by how quiet it is, well if my friends would shut up for five minutes that is. It's much warmer once we're in the sky, the propane gas tanks keep you toasty. There's a definite chill to the air at this time of day though, so I'm very excited to see the sun creeping out as we drift over the tops of the forests.

Isabella is brilliant, capturing every moment on film. She's been taking short films, as well as hundreds of photos, allowing the rest of us to relax and enjoy the experience. I feel guilty, after all the whole experience was in her honour. But then I see the massive smile on her beautiful face and realise she's loving her experience just as much as us, if not more and she's able to choose which bits she wants to show people and remember herself.

'When we land, do you think I can look through your photos? I think I'd like to do a story about this for the paper, but I'll need some truly amazing shots to show my boss to be able to justify something so touristy.'

Isabella looks so pleased, I'm worried for a moment she may jump up and down, and I can assure you, this is not the place for that.

'Yes! If it means having something published then you can have any photos you want!'

Josh puts his protective arm around Isabella's shoulders, a look of pride on his face.

'You should see if you can get him to agree to feature a tourism section. I've sent these girls to my must see places. Places that some of the locals won't have been to themselves, shame on them.'

The guide is dancing from foot to foot, it looks like he's been listening into their conversation, but doesn't want to admit it. Although, he's clearly desperate to say something, but feels like he should keep quiet.

'What do you think? Do you think the Florida Times should have a tourism special dedicated to my friend's photos?'

I watch as Izzy and the boys turn their confused attention from me to the man, who up until this point has just been pointing out the sights, and administering the fire as and when needed.

'Well, I'd have to speak to my manager, but I'm sure if you could write an article about us, we'd be able to offer some discounted flights. It'd be free publicity after all, and in the Florida times no less! I love that paper; I read it every day, what's your name?'

Ollie looks a bit embarrassed but before he can reply, Josh jumps in, clearly excited at the thought of his friend having his very own fan.

'You my good man are looking at Mr Oliver Clarke. One of the best reporters there is. He also takes photos but he's not quite as good as my girlfriend, although he's learning quickly.'

The guy turns to gawp at Ollie; it's clear from his reaction that he's familiar with Ollie's work.

'Wow, it's great to meet you Mr Clarke. I read your articles every day. You're my favourite journalist. I always read yours first. I really think you should have your own column!'

He's so animated and it makes me feel so proud of Ollie. I feel a bit guilty that I have yet to read one of his articles. As soon as we land, I'll buy a copy and study it; after all, he is my boyfriend now.

'Rather than a tourism section, you should tell your boss my story and see if you can get your own column where you do a daily blog about me.'

It worries me that Isabella sounds serious about this. I don't think she'd actually like everyone reading about her. About what pain relief she has to take day by day, when she's in too much pain to move, when she can do nothing but cry to relieve the tension. These times haven't started yet luckily, she seems to managing with painkillers but that could change at any point.

'I don't know about that. It may be a bit much; do you really want everyone to know? If we started it, you'd have to give me something to write about every day, no matter how sick you were feeling.'

Good Ollie, give her the facts. The tour guide has the good grace to stop listening to this conversation, clearly understanding it's private and not something for him to get involved in.

'I know Ollie. I was thinking about writing a diary to help people who're going through the same thing, or something for my mum to read and remember me by when I'm gone. A memento of my travelling but I'm too lazy to write it myself. So if you can persuade your boss, this would be a much better idea.'

Ollie looks a bit awkward, I'm sure he doesn't want to get her hopes up. From what Josh has said, Ollie's the favourite at work and he's as close to top as you get. So if he wants something publishing, he's almost certain to get it.

'I'll talk to my boss when I go in today. Unlike most companies, if the boss wants us in on a weekend, he's more than happy to work as well.'

'Dude, let's not talk about work yeah? It's bad enough being a waiter and having to work weekends without you reminding me.'

Poor Josh, I feel sympathy for him; I used to hate my job before I quit to come here. At least I worked in an office so I was only Monday to Friday. But then saying that, when we decided to go travelling Isabella and I used to fundraise at the weekends to help us with money. I was working seven days a week for a month, but it paid off because I still have quite a lot in my savings account, and I've avoided touching the savings bond mum set up with the money she got when dad died. I know there's quite a lot in there, but I don't want to use it, I only got it when I turned 21 a couple of days ago, but I made a pact with myself when I first found out about it. I will not spend it until I'm at least 30, unless I decide to buy a house, go to university or have a baby, as these are expensive, landmark expenses.

'Right, we're going to start the descent now, so I'd get your camera ready sweetheart.'

##  Chapter Six

The landing was fairly stress-free. There were a few little bumps, and I found myself clinging to both Isabella and Ollie's hands until their fingers went numb. Once we'd landed, we had a glass of champagne to toast the new day. Then we had a lovely picnic breakfast in the field we landed in, while the tracking team came to deflate the balloon and pack everything away. It's weird to think they've followed us all this way, I can't help but think what would have happened if they'd got stuck in traffic and lost us. Luckily they didn't.

After we were all given a certificate of flight, photo postcard and food we were driven back to the start to get Ollie's car. We've just dropped Josh home for a couple of hours sleep before he goes to work. Ollie's now driving us to Discovery Cove so we can get a nice early start.

So far today we've crossed off 37 – go in a hot air balloon, 38 – get drunk on champagne. Although, we both admitted we only felt drunk for about ten minutes before the food hit our stomachs. We're still going to count it though. We also crossed off 40 – start the day with alcohol without feeling guilty, and 58 – fly without panicking, something Isabella already mastered on the way here. After all, I guess the fear of impending death is less scary when you know you're on your countdown anyway.

'Okay, we're here! Can I have your memory card now?'

Isabella takes the little card from her camera, replacing it with her spare one and hands it to Ollie excitedly.

'Have a great time and give me a call when you want picking up. I'm going to spend the day at work so it'll take me about half an hour to get here.'

I lean over to give him a kiss before getting out the car, and he whispers in my ear.

'I know dolphins aren't as good as penguins, but I hope you enjoy yourself babe.'

He's such a good boyfriend coming to pick us up whenever we want, and remembering my love of penguins.

Discovery cove opens at 9.30am but I read it gets busy early, so that's why we came straight over here. I know we'll have to queue for about forty five minutes but hopefully we can get a nice, early appointment for our dolphin swim. It sounds silly, but I want to get the dolphin swim out of the way so I won't have to stress about missing it. I'm almost more excited about the snorkelling in the lazy river with stingrays and fish.

'What about you and Ollie then? So much for you not liking him like that!'

Isabella is so impatient and gets bored really easily, so I know already this is going to be the longest wait.

'What do you want me to say Izzy? You were right, of course. I like Ollie, he's great'

Isabella shines a smug smile in my direction.

'I was right because I'm always right. And I'm always right because I'm amazing. So were you a good girl last night, considering it was the night you got together?'

'He was a complete gentleman last night. He didn't try anything; he wasn't even going to give me a kiss and a cuddle goodnight in case I felt pressured.'

'Tell me you at least got to see him naked?'

'No Isabella, I did not, and before you ask nor did he. We're taking it slow, which is more than I can say about you, if my sources are correct.'

Isabella looks slightly shamefaced before her devilish smile reappears and she giggles menacingly.

'What's the point in taking it slow when you don't have long to live, and you have a boyfriend like Josh? Who knows I may be too ill for sex soon, so I'm not going to miss a single opportunity in the meantime. Can you blame me? '

'No, of course I can't blame you. I'd probably be the same if I were in your situation. I have to ask though, without going into detail, what the hell were you doing when Ollie walked in?'

'Ha! What did he tell you we were doing?'

'He wouldn't tell me, he said it'd scar me and he didn't want me thinking about it.'

'Oh Livs, you're dating a prude! It was just a bit of exotic sixty-nine. My God Livs, Josh is amazing in bed.'

I think I must be blushing. I know I feel a bit embarrassed. Isabella doesn't usually indulge me in her sex life, other than very generalisations such as; oh yeah, I shagged Zack last night, or just so you know, after I left yours yesterday I got a booty text from Stuart.

'He's not a prude! He probably just didn't expect to see that going on in his spare room. I'm not going to ask what makes it exotic. Can we just draw a line under this topic?'

'He may be a prude, you'll know soon enough though. I think Josh is going to be my number 20 – Say I love you to a boyfriend and mean it, because I think number 1- fall in love has happened'

I'm going to say something now, and I know even before I've said it will be mean and will upset Isabella. But I can't stop myself from saying it.

'It's been two weeks Isabella. How can you love him? This is going to be another Stuart again.'

I actually feel like I've just ripped her heart out. I hate to see her like this, but I feel as her best friend and sister figure, I should try and keep her grounded.

'I can't help falling in love easily. And I did love Stuart, I just couldn't make him love me back – not all the time anyway.'

'I know you loved him Izzy, and it was his loss when he walked away from you, but I don't want the same thing to happen with Josh. I'm just trying to look out for you Hun.'

'I know you are Livs, you always do. But I guess now I'm dying I can go a bit wild, eh? It's not as if there will be many repercussions. Oh, look! The lines moving, I think we can go in.'

That was the end of that conversation, typical Isabella needing to get her own way and win the argument by dropping in the death situation. How am I supposed to top that?

Luckily, the rest of our day trip was most enjoyable. Swimming with dolphins was one of my favourite things so far on this holiday, but I actually loved the rays and fish too. It sounds silly, but all the animals seemed genuinely happy there. The dolphins frolicked around us doing tricks, and they really sounded happy, clicking and giggling as we splashed.

Isabella didn't enjoy the snorkelling with the fish. In her defence, it was almost ice cold compared to the humid sunshine all around us. Also, she'll not often admit it but she hates the thought of fish swarming around her. She has the most irrational fear that the fish will suddenly all swim at her face, or they'll decide she looks like human fish food. Isabella is slightly claustrophobic too so the constrictive face mask and the life jacket freak her out. At least she didn't have a panic attack this time.

Living in Cornwall makes it very hard to be scared of swimming, especially when there are hot surfer dudes to impress. I've always been a bit of a water baby, learning to surf almost as soon as I could swim, so after the Spain incident I spent most of my time with Isabella while she took surfing lessons. Isabella is now a confident swimmer and surfer, but she'd still rather sunbathe than swim. She always comes to the beach with me, but only to show off her exceptional figure in her smallest bikini to give her the nicest tan.

So while I was drifting through the lazy rapids and getting up close and personal with the colourful sea life, Isabella decided she was going to work on number 92 – sunbathe until you change colour. I have to say, when I found her sleeping on her stomach, I almost didn't recognise the lobster that was now Isabella.

'Wake up Izzy. You've definitely gained the right to cross off 92 now, at least roll over.'

An irrational thought floods through my mind when Izzy doesn't stir. What if the heat was too much for her? What if the excitement of the hot air balloon, following by champagne and the dolphins caused her to have a heart attack or caused her organs to fail? I find myself giving her a little kick in the ankle and give a silent prayer when she wriggles and groans at me. I hope the elation I'm feeling is because I know she's okay and not because I just realised my first instinct when suspecting Isabella was dead, was to kick her.

'Livs, what time is it?'

Isabella tries to roll over to face me, before the pain of sunburn stops her in her tracks.

'Hey Iz, it's getting quite late now, I may call Ollie if you're ready? Isabella, your back looks awful, I'm so sorry I was gone for so long! I got distracted.'

Izzy gingerly manages to roll into a sitting pose. It'd appear she's burnt her legs too. It doesn't look like she's bothered putting on sunscreen today.

'It's my own fault, but hey, what's a bit of skin cancer? I think you're right though, time to call Ollie. I'm starving.'

By the time we get to the "All you can eat" restaurant, Isabella is as red as a tomato with a very definite line drawn down the side of her body, where the white meets the red. I can tell she's in a foul mood because of the constant pain, but does a very good job of hiding it from the boys with fake smiles and laughter. I think this is also why nobody ever notices she's dying; she's so good at hiding her emotions. If it were me, I'd be a wreck – constantly crying.

The boys have piled their plates high, whilst Isabella and I have gone for more modest portions. Isabella doesn't seem to be eating much; despite her earlier stating she was starving. I think it might be her medication making her feel sick. She told me earlier she was going to take a stronger dose she has for emergencies. I was so worried, thinking she was close to the end, but seeing my reaction she quickly reassured me it was just for the pain of the sunburn.

'Why aren't you eating babe?'

Josh looks concerned at Isabella's sudden loss of appetite, especially after his blunder when he saw the state of Izzy. He lectured her about her stupidity, letting herself get that burnt, which would have been fine - if he'd left it there. Unfortunately, gorgeous Josh put his foot right in it by lecturing her about skin cancer and age spots when she's old. She wouldn't be able to go out in the sun with her kids when she's older because she would be a wrinkly old woman.

It was only when Ollie punched him in the arm and Isabella and I stormed out so neither of us would cry, that Josh realised his faux pas. There has been a bit of tension all evening and a lot of grovelling on Josh's part. So this use of "babe" is quite brave for him.

Isabella smiles sweetly at Josh, before answering

'I don't have enough ketchup babes; could you pass me it please?'

As Josh hands her the full bottle of ketchup, everything seems to go in slow motion as Isabella opens it and squirts Josh in the face, covering his hair before moving onto his body; she has to reach over the table to reach his crotch and legs. Josh sits in a state of shock for a few moments, before reaching to his plate, grabbing a handful of mash potato and launching it at Isabella. The soft mash hits her with a force in the throat, before sliding beautifully in between her cleavage and down her new dress. Isabella picks up a handful of her own mash, which is covered in gravy and slams it in Josh's hair.

Ollie and I make the mistake of laughing, and find food hurling towards us and that's it, a full on food fight has broken out and we're now covered.

'That's it! You'll have to leave now. Get out of my restaurant!'

The restaurant manager, a dumpy old man grabs Isabella and me by our arms dragging us giggling out of the front door, with the boys trailing behind.

As we head back to Ollie's car, we get strange looks from everyone passing by but all we can do is laugh.

'Do you realise we didn't pay for our meal?'

Ollie has a point, and I feel guilty. I'm about to suggest going back to pay, before Izzy puts it into perspective, 98 – blag a free meal. We're doing well with the list today!

##  Chapter Seven

The trip from Orlando to Vegas was brilliant. Isabella and I were thinking of renting a car originally, but when we discovered it takes about a day and a half by car, we decided we'd go for cheap flights instead. So when Ollie suggested taking his car and sharing the driving with Josh, we were a bit wary; in fact, it took a lot of persuasion from the boys to agree to drive rather than fly. The driving would have to be done solely by the boys as Isabella and I would cost too much to insure.

We decided to make the journey as short as possible, so only made a couple of stops along the way. We did go to Arizona to visit the Grand Canyon. How could anybody miss the opportunity to see it, I don't know. It was the most serene but stunning place. We took a helicopter ride over the top, so we could see every part of it.

After our big food fight, Isabella and I started to go through our list and tick things off we'd done. Ollie noticed we had "Vegas" and "The Grand Canyon" on the list and asked us when we were going there. Unlike Josh, Ollie has never been but always wanted to have a road trip there. He told me his boss loved Isabella's photos and wanted to do a daily blog of her story. Apparently it'd really hook their regular readers. His boss told him to take some time off to spend with us, as long as he emailed an article or two every day. So Izzy and I decided this would be a great time to blitz through the rest of the things for Orlando, before heading over to Las Vegas with the boys. I was a bit worried Isabella wouldn't go for it, but that was a bit stupid really. Why would Izzy want to go away and leave her new boyfriend, the new love of her life behind?

So it was settled, Josh booked a holiday from work, Ollie wrote a handful of articles about Isabella's back story ready for his boss to start putting in the paper. Doing it this way meant Ollie actually had a few days of relaxing before his next deadline. Whilst the boys were tying up their loose ends, Izzy and I sent half our stuff home to our parents, and rushed about finishing the Orlando tasks on the list.

I completed the "Sunbathe until you change colour" task from the list, and cried as Ollie rubbed after sun into my pink skin. Isabella has a great tan now, whereas mine just blistered and peeled away leaving another layer of pasty, white skin below. I hate being blonde and pale sometimes. My mum tells me it's because I'm an English Rose, with my pink cheeks and sparkly blue eyes.

By the time we started our long journey for Las Vegas, five of Ollie's articles about Isabella had gone out. Ollie's boss rang to say they'd had more feedback and support for Isabella than about anything else they'd ever done. He'd even been called by a couple of studios who wanted to display her photos, if she could get them framed or stretched onto canvases.

Ollie's new tenant has agreed to live rent free while we're away, providing he manages all of Ollie's business. Including; booking tourists into the flat, sorting out which of Isabella's photos should be published and dealing with studios, taking payment, etc. Ollie has become Isabella's manager and both of them love their new roles.

Ollie's tenant, Peter, has also arranged for every copy of Florida Times to be set to the UK for Isabella's mum. This was his idea, and such a lovely thing to do. We met briefly before the trip, he's very sweet. Closer in age to Isabella and me, and at just 23 he's just a few months younger than Josh.

We arrived in Vegas yesterday and had a lazy day relaxing in the hotel, and seeing some of the amazing scenery. We're staying in the Bellagio Hotel, where Oceans 11 was filmed. It's really expensive, but when Ollie's boss heard we were travelling to Vegas, he called the manager to swap some free publicity for a free stay for us. Isabella has taken loads of photos of the hotel and the legendary water fountain outside. Ollie managed to have a quick meeting with the manager of the hotel, who's agreed to Isabella selling her photos of the hotel as long as they get to choose their favourites for the lobby.

When I said we had a lazy day, I meant all of us except Ollie who seems to be constantly working; trying to better his career and life. It's a trait I wish I had; I don't even know what I want to be when I grow up.

We started gambling at 10am today, after a hearty breakfast. Today is the day we're aiming to do our challenge of gambling for 24 hours. I think this will be harder than we initially imagined, we've only been playing for seven hours and I already want to go shower and get changed. But no, we have to stay.

The service is brilliant here; they have drinks and anything you could possibly want to eat; although you kind of forget about food in this place, you just keep gambling. The boys have spent most of their time flitting between the poker and black jack tables. Josh is very impulsive so has been winning big and losing it all again, whereas Ollie is a little more sensible and has been planning his moves and gradually increasing his funds.

Isabella was playing roulette, but has come to join me on the slots. I figure we can win quite a lot on the slots if we stay for 24 hours and keep to the same machine. But I predict the majority of the winnings will be the return of our own money.

'Do you want to go play craps with me? I can't play anymore poker with Josh; he's stressing me out with his ridiculous gambles.'

Ollie sneaks up on us, making us both jump slightly.

'Oh no, is he losing lots of money? Maybe I should go and keep an eye on him. How hard is poker? Do you think I could pick it up easily?'

Ollie holds his hand out to Isabella, helping her off her stool.

'Just sit with him for a couple of rounds, and then do the exact opposite of what he does and you'll be fine!'

Isabella rolls her eyes at Ollie's words of wisdom as she heads off in the direction of the poker tables.

'So Miss Hope, can I interest you in a game of craps?'

'Ollie, what are you talking about? Surely there's no game actually called crap?'

Ollie laughs at my reaction to having said crap, well either that or my stupidity at not knowing what the game is.

'Come on darling, I'll show you. It's nice and simple, almost as easy as slots.'

I allow him to lift me off my stool and collect my pot of chips, before following him to a large table full of people shouting. The table looks like a converted pool table with its moss green background, but it has numbers and boxes with things like "come" and "pass line". We watch them play for a bit before Ollie proceeds to explain the basics to me.

'Okay so to begin, the shooter, one of the players, must play at least the table minimum on either the pass line or don't pass line. The shooter, who for this exercise we'll say is you, gets presented with about 5 dice, you then get to choose your favourite two. You can only hold them in one hand when you're about to throw them, and when you do throw you must hit the wall the opposite end of the table. Then the other players get to do the same, and people can bet on you if they don't want to play it themselves.'

'Oh, is this what they play in "F.R.I.E.N.D.S" when Monica has to roll the eight?'

'Erm, yeah... that's the one. But you're kind of interrupting me. Do you at least know what you're doing now though, because you made me lose my trail of thought?'

I'm not sure if he's actually annoyed at me or not, so to be on the safe side I give him one of my dazzling smiles and a quick kiss.

'I think I get it, now let's win our millions!'

Four AM was when it really started to get difficult. Josh and I both wanted to quit, after all we'd been playing for 18 hours. But luckily we both have strong partners who refuse to give up before the job is finished. I've always known Isabella was determined, but at five AM I saw a completely new side to her.

'Sit back down! You're not giving up on me Olivia. Josh has gone back to playing the slots, now shut up and do something to entertain yourself. All you have done for the last hour is moan and strop. To be honest, even Ollie can't stand to be around you right now!'

I look around; it takes me a while to place Ollie. Maybe she has a point, even if she didn't express it in the best way possible. Ollie is quite far away, have I been that annoying? He was around for a bit, when I first mentioned going to bed.

'I... I'm...'

Oh god, why am I crying? It doesn't even look like she's going to comfort me. I can't blame her, but she's my best friend. I would expect her to do something.

'Stop it now. If you don't stop it right now I'm going to go find Josh because I'm too tired to deal with this shit, and I don't want to do or say something I'll regret.'

Isabella is starting to look really tired and poorly, I think she's in a lot of pain but she won't quit. Throughout this evil illness she's stayed strong and I know she won't quit until it takes her over completely. Luckily for both of us, it's so quiet at this time of morning, Ollie heard our raised voices and rushed over to calm us.

'Don't argue girls. We're all tired so have a hug to apologise, and then I think it would be best if Isabella goes with Josh and I'll stay here with you Olivia. We can meet at six thirty for breakfast and see how we get on? Does that sound like a plan?'

We both nod our agreement and have a quick hug before Isabella makes off and I collapse into Ollie's arms.

By the time ten AM comes and we leave the casino for our hotel rooms, I'm wide awake. I am proud to say two of us leave with more than we started with, one of us leaves with considerably more than he started with, and one stroppy Josh leaves with quite a bit less and has to be dragged out kicking and screaming. Isabella and I agree a meeting time of two PM for a late breakfast/lunch, before leading our men off to our respectable rooms.

'I don't know about you, but I'm not tired at all.'

I announce this with a wink, as soon as we are in our room. Ollie looks temporarily confused by the wink, before he realises what I am implying. He answers my question with a long sensuous kiss, as he picks me up and carries me to the bed.

'Are you sure?'

We haven't had sex yet, and I wonder if he thinks I'm a virgin.

'Oh yes. I'm sure, now stop talking and kiss me!'

Ollie gently shakes me awake at one PM to tell me I have a text.

'Will you read it to me please? I can't open my eyes.'

He chuckles slightly as he leans over me to find my mobile, or cell as he insists on calling it.

'Okay my sleepy kitten. It's from Isabella. She says she's not feeling too well so her and Josh are going to give lunch a miss and maybe get some room service later. Sorry.'

'Oh, will you text her back and say alright Hun, feel better, text me later and some kisses?'

'And what do I get as a reward for texting her back for you?'

I open my eye to see if he's implying what I think he's implying and I'm met with a completely naked Ollie.

'Send the message quickly and I'll reward you accordingly.'

I try my best to sound sexy and seductive but once I hear my voice, I know I just sound tired. As soon as Ollie starts his magic I wake up instantly. He starts by massaging my shoulders and kissing my neck, works his way down my body, kissing every inch. I've never been with an older man before him, other than a year older. I suddenly realise what the benefits are, Ollie is experienced. He knows what I'll like, and he's brilliant at everything from foreplay to orgasms, but he's so gentle and caring at the same time. I wonder how many women he's been with... No I don't. Why would I want to know that?

After, I lie in his arms wishing I could stay there forever, but it's getting late now and I'm hungry. I can hear his stomach grumble so I know he's hungry too.

'Shall we order some room service? Or maybe go out and see some of Vegas?'

I give him the option. If he chooses room service I'll reward him with sex, if he chooses going out I'll demand a present so he can spend some of his winnings from last night.

'As much as I'd love to stay here in bed with you all day, I think we should go out and get some fresh air. It seems so long since we saw daylight and the outside world. Also, I want to buy you something to remind you of our first trip together.'

Okay, I know I was mocking Isabella about saying she loved Josh already, but oh my God, I love Ollie! What an amazing guy, and to think I didn't even fancy him to start with!

'That sounds like an awesome plan, but before we do that, do you want to join me in the shower?'

'Awesome eh... you've picked up the American slang already I see! A shower sounds like a good idea but there'll be no funny business Miss Hope because we've already wasted most of the day sleeping.'

'Okay fine, if you insist. I suppose you're right, we only have another day in Vegas before we head to Canada.'

'Why are you going to Canada instead of Mexico again?'

'Isabella and I went to Mexico a couple of years ago with our mums, so we have no need to again. My dad used to go to Canada every year to fish and I've always wanted to go there to fish myself, but mum would never go with me because it was too painful. So Isabella decided to put it on the list so I couldn't chicken out.'

Ollie swaps sides with me so I can wash the conditioner out of my hair. I'm hoping he won't ask questions because I'm not in the frame of mind to talk about my dad right now. I know full well that he's going to ask something ,because the look on his face shows he's suddenly realise he knows quite a bit about my mum; but has never heard me mention my dad.

'Are your parents divorced? How come he never took you with him on one of his trips?'

I pause, taking extra time to rinse the bubbles from my hair, psyching myself up to talk about my dad.

'No, not divorced. My mum still loves him 100%, which is why she never moved on and found new love. He never took me because he died just before I was born, so I never got to meet him; I just get to hear all these fantastic stories about him. It would appear he was one of those amazing guys that everybody just loved. Everyone knows something about him. All his friends and family are always talking about it him, telling me stories about him. It's nice to hear, but sometimes it makes me sad I'll never get to meet him. I don't think it helps my mum to move on either, it's been twenty one years now and sometimes she acts as if it was just yesterday.'

I step out of the shower and hand Ollie a towel, he looks shocked, probably at the matter of fact tone to my voice, or the fact I've never even hinted towards a dead dad before.

'Oh Livs, I'm so sorry. That's awful and I guess Isabella's situation is just bringing it all home.'

'Why do people say sorry? It's not your fault, so there's no need to apologise. Also, Isabella is completely different. I know her; I spend every day with her and now I have to watch her slowly die before my eyes. My dad wasn't sick, just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I never knew him so I don't really feel any great loss. I know that sounds really cold, but it's just the way I cope.'

We towel dry in near silence as Ollie is clearly trying to find the right words, but failing. What can anyone say in this situation? Nothing, there are no words.

Ollie inhales as if he's going to say something, but then he changes his mind again.

'There's nothing you can say Ollie. Just give me a hug and let's go present shopping.'

##  Chapter Eight

The following day, I phone Isabella to see what the plan is before our flight, but Josh answers sounding worried.

'I'm so pleased you called Olivia. I don't know what to do! Isabella's been sick all night, she's trying to put on a brave face but keeps crying in pain. She's been taking her painkillers but nothing seems to be working. She can't keep most of them down anyway. I think you should see if you can get your flights changed from Canada to the UK.'

I'm speechless I no longer feel any part of my body, I've lost control. Sensing something's wrong, Ollie comes to join me on the bed, wrapping his arms around me.

'Um... Yes, okay... Have you asked her if she's happy to go home? Ask her if she wants to stay here for a few more days to see if it gets better. She may not want to travel if she's feeling that ill. Can I talk to her?'

Ollie looks concerned and I hope he gets the gist of the conversation because I really don't want to have to go through it all with him. Oh God, I'm going to have to call her mum and tell her we're coming home early, and why. I'll have to ask either her or my mum to pick us up from the airport. Should I ask them to have a doctor waiting, or would that be too dramatic? Oh, Josh is talking to me and I haven't been listening.

'Sorry Josh, can you repeat that please?'

'I said, she's sleeping now so I don't want to wake her. Can you just sort the flight please? She agreed it was the best thing for her; she wants to see her mum. She called her mum earlier and explained so if you sort the flights and let me know the time, I'll call her mum back so she knows when to pick you up.'

'Okay, I'll call you later.'

As I hang up the phone, the lump in my throat threatens to choke me. Clearly reading my reaction, Ollie wraps his arms tighter around me; the beautiful silver necklace he bought me yesterday feels cold around my neck.

While we were out having fun and picking presents for each other, poor Isabella was throwing up and Josh was scared and alone, not knowing what to do. He's actually handled the situation perfectly; I didn't think he'd have managed it if something went wrong. He seemed like the "love them and leave them" type, so it's nice to see he's not like that.

'You can pack your things and I'll sort the flights. Do you want me and Josh to come with you? I'm sure I can find someone to pick up my car for me.'

'Thanks for the offer, the flights would be awesome... but Izzy and I will be fine, no point in you and Josh cutting your road trip short. Enjoy it.'

Almost a month later, Isabella and I are halfway across the UK. Izzy had to have bed rest for a week and is now on stronger painkillers. She goes through moments where she seems to be in another world, but she seems to be in less pain now. In a way, it's lucky the doctors still see no point in putting her through chemotherapy or radiography. This way she can stay more active and still travel and there's not a risk of her losing her hair.

When she was diagnosed as terminal, the only saving grace was that she wouldn't lose her looks. But since she has started to get worse it has been almost overnight that she seems to have dropped a dress size, her usual curves have slimmed down and she's upset to be less womanly now. I try not to take offence when she complains about this, but it's hard to support someone who's still ten times curvier than you. I know she's not saying it out of spite and I'm sure she doesn't realise she's upsetting me. But then, I guess she has more pressing issues on her mind at the moment.

'Josh just text me, he wants to come out and visit us when we're in Scotland. Ollie as well, of course! What do you think?'

I've been doing all the driving so Isabella can take advantage of all the scenery and the beautiful iconic sights of the UK. But Isabella has spent the majority of the time texting Josh, telling him how much she misses him, or texting Ollie to update him on her trip for his articles.

I feel like telling her to drive for a bit, rather than ignoring everything, including me. I'm sure it's just the lack of sleep making me feel this way though. Suddenly the thought of a hug and kiss from Ollie feels like it'd be the best thing in the world.

'That sounds great! I think we'll be there in just over a week, so get him to book some flights and we can work our time around them.'

'Are you sure you don't mind them interrupting us?'

Isabella asks but I can tell she's already excited to see them... well Josh. Even if I'd have said no, I'm sure she'd have tried to convince me otherwise.

'Of course I don't mind. I've been missing Ollie, and even Josh! So hurry up and text him back, then put your phone away for a bit and take in the sights before I make you drive.'

'Are we nearly there yet?'

I can't stay angry with Isabella. But it'll be nice to have a bit of a break from her, actually I take that back. I will not feel this way or take her for granted.

On our flight home from Las Vegas, our air stewards were absolutely fabulous. Luckily, the flight was quite quiet so we had a row of seats to ourselves. I was going to sit on the aisle seat and watch films, and then Izzy could stretch out over two seats and sleep. She started to cry in her sleep, and I was finding it hard to comfort her and didn't want to wake her up when she's so ill. So when one of the stewards came to see if we were okay, I explained the situation briefly. She was amazing, her name was Michelle, and she actually managed to move some people around in first class so there were two seats together. Michelle then came back and told me the plan, she'd already helped me pack up our stuff and move it to first class before I woke Isabella. Isabella was a bit stroppy when she first woke, until I explained we were moving up in the world.

Once we landed and Isabella was on the mend, I phoned Ollie to ask him to include Michelle's details and how wonderful the airline had been. Every part of that flight was made as easy as possible.

'Is this it? Are we there now Livs?'

I smile at her animated face as she throws her phone into her bag and stares out the window.

'Yes Izzy, we're here, "The Metro Centre", one of the best shopping centres in the UK.'

'Yay, Oh my God, look how big it is! What did you say about the clothes being colour coded?'

I can't help but giggle at Isabella's reaction, she sounds like an excited child, practically drooling on the window.

'It's not the clothes that are colour coded, you muppet. It's the malls, they've divided it into four malls; red, green, blue and yellow. There's like 340 something shops, so they have themed malls so you don't waste your time. Now help me find a parking space, it's manic.'

We've decided to shop today, especially after Isabella's lost weight so nothing really fits. I read that there's a cinema and some arcades, so if Izzy gets tired we can see them instead. Not that I'd tell her that's part of the plan, she'd hate to think I was making special stops for her. She hates to think she's an invalid.

We stopped the see the Angel of the North on our way here. Isabella took loads of great photos for Ollie and her new studio back home which her mum is managing for her. I was really shocked by the size of it the Angel, apparently its width is bigger than the Statue of Liberty's height. There was so much detail in it; I can see why it took four years to build. I've been trying to do some culture bits in each place we visit. Usually Isabella and I would plan our trip together, but she just hasn't been feeling well enough, so I've had to take charge.

We're going to Saltwell Park tomorrow for a bit of relaxation, then after we're going to go to The Sage. We'll be going as much to see the shiny building, as to listen to the music.

Then once we've completed our tour of the North of England, we'll be off to Scotland to see our wonderful men, and I can't wait.

'Do you know that we're as far away from home as we can get in England?'

'Oh, that sounds really weird. Maybe that's why I feel homesick at the moment. I always miss home more when I know I'm not that far away. If I was abroad, I wouldn't feel homesick at all.'

I finally find a space and park the car, when I open the door to get out, I realise Isabella is just sat there, showing no signs of moving.

'Are you okay?'

She turns to face me, looking sorrowful.

'Are you homesick even though I'm here? Do you want us to head home?'

'Don't be silly Izzy. I'm a bit homesick but not enough to head home. Anyway, let's go do some shopping eh?'

'I love you Livs. I'm sorry I haven't been myself lately; I'm going to snap out of it now and just enjoy the rest of my life. Who cares if I feel fucking hideous at times?'

'Ha-ha! That's an awful term! But I'm pleased to hear you're going to enjoy yourself. I love you too, now come, get out of the car!'

Isabella jumps out of the car, giving me a big hug before leading the way to the shops. This girl has her priorities right.

##  Chapter Nine

Isabella and I are waiting in the arrivals department of Inverness airport. It's 3.50AM and the boy's plane has just landed. The boys will have been flying for roughly nine hours, but it's Izzy who's complaining about being tired. Also, the boys will feel like it's the day before due to the time difference. By the time they get out from baggage claim, it'll be about 4AM on Monday but to them it'll feel like 11PM on Sunday Night. I hate jet lag!

'There's Josh!'

Just the smallest glimpse of her boyfriend is enough to wake Isabella up and send her running towards him. I'm desperately searching for Ollie, worried he's not here. Why isn't he walking with Josh? Then I realise the giant teddy bear that's just behind Josh, is in fact Ollie.

'Ollie! What's this?'

He lowers the teddy so I can see his smiling face. He looks tired and stressed, but it works well on him; giving him a rough look. Although it looks like he's not slept for a couple of days, and I'm not a fan of facial hair, so that'll be going once we get back to the hotel.

'I've missed you so much Livs! I brought you a little friend from Vegas, his name is Hugh.'

'I've missed you too. If the teddy is from Vegas, shouldn't he be called something a bit more American? Maybe even Vegas?'

Ollie looks slightly embarrassed as he hands me Hugh.

'I was a little drunk when I won him for you, and when the bloke asked me which one I wanted, I asked for a British one for my beautiful British girlfriend. The bloke handed me this one and said he was British because he was called Hugh Grant, and that's who all the British girls like.

I can't help but laugh at him, until I see the crestfallen look on his face.

'Oh baby, I love it! Thank you. But just so we're clear, Hugh Grant... kind of old now, so not quite my generation. Come on, I'm knackered, let's go back to the hotel room.'

We look around briefly for Isabella and Josh, until I notice Josh's suitcase disappearing into the disabled toilets. My phone proceeds to vibrate in my pocket, indicating a text message.

Isabella – 'Tick off 34 will you? We'll see you about 10 for breakfast. Xx'

I show Ollie the text message but he clearly doesn't know what 34 is, because he looks most confused.

'34 is "Have sex in a public place or at work". I just saw her and Josh disappear into the toilets.'

'Want to join them?'

Ollie winks at me before realising from my reaction he's said something wrong.

'I don't mean join them as in "join" them. I meant should we complete 34 as well... You know what; let's just go back to the hotel.'

'Let's leave 34 for now, but we can do number 2 "Have amazing sex". I have a little treat for you.'

I start to lead the way before turning back to Ollie. It's really quiet in the airport at this time of night, and I suddenly feel confident. So I open my coat slightly, letting him catch a glimpse of the corset I'm wearing. I was going to put on the fishnet stockings I have to match, but figured as I'm wearing a short skirt, it may be too much. I'm still new to this dressing up thing as it is.

Before we started our UK trip, Isabella and I decided to complete number 80 - Change your image completely. Izzy's cut her long, wavy hair into a neat bob that fits her slimmer face beautifully. Now she's lost a bit of weight, her curves aren't quite so pronounced, so she's able to wear clothes she couldn't before. She loves wearing short skirts and shorts, whereas before she'd worry about what top hid her breasts the best. In her words, she couldn't show too much tit and ass at the same time.

On the other hand, I've kept the length of my blonde hair, but at Isabella's suggestion I now have a side fringe and more layers. I also have a few pink hi-lights, but I'm not so sure about them. I've substituted my surf style of baggy jeans and jumpers for cropped trousers and vest tops, with skirts and dresses for warmer weather. I'm even mastering high heels, although the first few times I wore them Isabella laugh at me, and I almost took them straight off again.

It's weird, but actually wearing more feminine clothes does make me feel more womanly. I've even bought a few padded bras to help me in the chest area. One of them is called the OMG bra, and it makes them a whole size bigger. I never thought I wanted big breasts, I was always slightly jealous of Isabella because I thought it was the reason all the guys went for her.

I realise now that it wasn't the size of her chest, it was the confidence they gave her. So I've made a deal with myself to be more confident and take more risks. This is also the reason I've dressed up for Ollie, we have a great sex life at the moment because we're still at the start of the relationship; but I'm worried eventually he'll get bored and leave, like the others. So I thought if I keep the sex exciting and try to be less of a prude, it may help. I thought it would be embarrassing but it's actually given me a lot of confidence.

We're on our way to the Plodda Falls at the moment. They've been described as Scotland's answer to Niagara Falls. Apparently there are a couple of nice walks around it too. It'll be nice to have a relaxing day today, after the crazy day we had yesterday. The boys decided to do some Highland activities so we started the day quad biking. I was so worried about having to do it; it's really not my kind of thing, but actually once we got going I really enjoyed it. We went biking through the Ardverikie Estate which I instantly recognised as the set of Monarch of the Glen. I used to love watching this, curled up on the sofa with hot chocolate and cookies with my mum. I was quite young so I didn't really enjoy the storyline much, but I loved spending this quality time with my mum. I also had the biggest crush on Duncan McKay. I know, he was just a character, but it wasn't just his looks that got me, it was his personality too. Duncan was the first crush I had, so I spent ages looking for more information on him. His real name is Hamish Clark, and he's far too old for me but even now I go a bit giddy when I think of him.

When we finished the quad biking, I was so excited at the thought of just being on the land that Hamish Clark had once walked on, I was positively bouncing. Ollie thought it was hilarious I was so excited, until he realised it was the man I was excited about, not the place. Don't get me wrong, it was a stunning place, truly beautiful and I'd recommend it to anyone. But Hamish Clark was like the cherry on the top.

There was so much we could have done there, they offer white water rafting, canoeing, gorge walking, off road driving, paint balling and so much more! We had to rule out the ones that included water and pain, and we'd already done driving. We eventually settled on clay pigeon shooting. I was awful at it and needed the most help. The instructor had been really kind, but I got a bit annoyed when he gave me a child's rifle; because he felt the others were too big and heavy for me. Surprisingly, Isabella was the best of our whole group. Josh was pretending to be proud of her and really pleased, but it was so obvious he hated being beaten by a girl; even if it was his girlfriend. It was such a good day, but we were so tired by the end of it so we decided to have a quick meal at the hotel, before an early night. I could tell from Isabella's slumped shoulders and pained expression she'd pushed herself too far with all the activities. But credit to her, she kept a smile plastered on her face. The boys were oblivious to her exhausted pain.

I woke up halfway through the night to find Ollie typing away on his IPAD. Apparently he couldn't sleep, so was writing some articles about the last couple of days to send to his boss. He also had an email asking for more of Isabella's photos. Since the paper published the fact Isabella is dying, her work has doubled, if not tripled, in both sales and in price. It would appear that everybody wants one, now they know they'll be quite rare and will increase in value once Isabella passes. It makes me sick to think people can even think like that. I've told Izzy to sell as many as she can, so they won't be so rare and to screw over the money grabbing bastards. Isabella just laughs at it, its easy money for her, getting paid to do something she loves and would be doing for free anyway. I wish I could have her outlook on life sometimes. Maybe I should add that to my list, number 101 be more like Isabella.

'I think this is it Livs.'

Ollie is pointing to a small car park on the left. I felt a bit weird driving us to start with, I've been so used to Ollie doing all the driving in our relationship so I felt a little pressured. But it's been fine. Ollie has been a great navigator, much better than Isabella ever was. Ollie and I have left the other two back in the hotel watching films, neither of them felt like a hike! Poor Izzy has been really poorly today, I think the excitement of having Josh home has been a bit much for her. It's taken 45 minutes for Ollie and me to drive here, but apparently the views are so stunning so it's totally worth it.

'Come on Livs, grab what you need and let's get going.'

'How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?'

I keep my tone flat, so he'll think I'm annoyed with him. But really, I'd hate him to call me Olivia; it'd just sound too formal.

'Sorry kitten!'

Ollie winks at me as he grabs the picnic basket out of the boot, slamming the door shut after him.'

'Kitten?'

'My new pet name for you, because you're small and cute like a kitten.'

'Okay, fine. I'm ready now chicken.'

Ollie turns to stare at me, and I have to bite my lip so I don't laugh at his expression!

'Chicken? A woman is a chick, if anything I'm a cock! Oh no, wait, I take that back, I'm not a cock!'

Nothing I could say now would add to this comical statement, so instead I take his free hand and lead him into the wilderness.

'I'm not a cock, am I kitten? Why have you gone so quiet?'

'I'm quiet because there's no need for me to confirm you're not a cock. We both know you're the most amazing man in the world. You're kind, caring, loving, funny and really smart. Now stop saying cock and let's get going.'

I try to walk on, but Ollie pulls my hand hard, causing me to turn to face him. He has a really serious, almost sad, expression on his face and I'm filled with a sick feeling. Oh god, what have I said wrong?

'Olivia, that's the nicest thing anybody has ever said to me. When Josh first suggested I meet you so he could get closer to Isabella, I wasn't thrilled on the idea, but I owed him a favour. I know that sounds awful, but usually he gets the beauties and I get the boring friends and want to rip my hair out. And I wasn't sure about the age gap between us, but the very first time I met you I knew you were special. I knew I had to get to know you better, but you didn't seem interested in me in the slightest. The time I spent with you, the more intense the feeling was, and now that you're my girlfriend....'

He pauses and I can't bare the seconds of silence between us.

'I love you Ollie!'

'I love you too Olivia!'

Hearing both our name together, I suddenly realise his full name is Oliver which is basically the male version of Olivia. We must sound like such a silly couple. This thought makes my smile even wider.

'So kitten, how about we try number 32 now?

I'm about to pull out the list to see what 32 is, feeling impressed that Ollie has memorised the list. Then he leans into me, dropping the picnic basket and pulling my bag from my shoulder onto the floor. He kisses me whilst carefully unbuttoning my shirt; I can feel his erection pushing into my hip. Ooh, 32 is "have sex outside", of course he'd remember that! I'm not one to argue though, so I wrap my arms around his neck and return his kiss.

'It's safe to say that was my favourite sight from my whole Scotland trip. Shall we have some of the picnic now kitten?'

'I'm hardly a sight! We should probably at least start the hike before we eat, so up you get and gather your bits together and lets go.'

Ollie pouts at me but grudgingly gets up and does as he's told.

As we start walking up the rocky hill, Ollie's still pouting and it would appear he's sulking about something.

'What's wrong with you?'

Ollie turns to face me with a childish smile, before poking me on the nose.

'I love you Livs. I wish I could stay with you forever! Don't make me go back to America without you!'

'That's so sweet baby, I'm not making you go back to America. I'm making you join me in Cornwall to meet my friends and family, and after that, you may change your mind about me.'

'I think it'd be impossible to ever change my mind about you. Now come on, I'm starving; I'll race you to the top.'

With that, Ollie lets go of my hand and races forward, leaving me in his wake.

##  Chapter Ten

'Are you ready?'

I'm just about to pull into my road and I'm starting to feel a little worried the boys will be overwhelmed. I've driven most of the way, with Izzy doing a few hours in the middle. Scotland to Cornwall is a really long drive, especially with a couple of American men in the car giving you tips, telling you to speed up. They also had a tendency to ask questions about where we were and what that part of England is famous for. Sometimes with our limited geography knowledge, Isabella and I didn't know so had to blag it in the hopes they wouldn't then check their smart phones.

Rita and mum have organised a big BBQ for our friends and family to meet our new boyfriends, and as a very belated birthday celebration. We're having it at my house as it's bigger than Isabella's.

'Of course they're ready. There's nothing to be scared of Livs! Come on everyone, out the car, we're here!'

My mum must have heard the car pull up, either that or she'd been waiting by the window watching for us. I really hope it's the former.

'Olivia! Sweetheart, I've missed you! Isabella, I've missed you too, of course!'

Mum rushes over and pulls me into a tight hug, so tight she knocks the wind out of me. She reaches out a hand and grabs Izzy pulling her in as well, until she spots the boys getting out of the car.

'Oh my goodness, would you look at those two! Which one's the lucky man sweetheart?'

Mum half whispers this at me, but it's too loud to be a proper whisper and I hope the boys didn't hear her. Honestly, she's so embarrassing sometimes.

'Mum, meet Isabella's boyfriend Josh and my boyfriend Ollie.'

I struggle out of her embrace to gesture towards the two awkward looking Americans in turn. Mum gives Josh a quick cuddle before pushing him to one side to grab Ollie.

'It's so nice to finally meet you! Olivia's just about told me everything about you!'

I swear I've gone as red as mum's lipstick. I know she's just being friendly but she's too full on, not to mention she's making me look like a stalker or something.

'Okay mum, you can let go of him now, please.'

'It's very nice to meet you Mrs Hope.'

Ollie flashes my mum his most dazzling smile and it makes my knees go weak. Then I feel a rush of jealousy, why is he smiling at her the way he smiles at me? I must stop this.

'So mum, who is coming today?'

'Oh yes, what are we doing standing around out the front? Let's go through, almost everybody is here already. Isabella, we're still waiting for your mum; she's late as usual.'

Mum practically pushes us through the house, which is just as well because everywhere you look there are baby photos of me. Everything from me as a naked baby in the bath with a bubble beard, to me on my prom night with my first "love"; how embarrassing! I should've made her to take them down before the boys got here. Ollie tries to stop and look at one of Isabella and me in our pink tutus, but I swiftly move him on. That's enough of that. Isabella on the other hand is actively pointing out the most embarrassing photos to Josh. I can hear giggles and cute words coming from them and I want to throw something at her! It's not my fault I was too small to argue and look like a bloody poodle in that photo. Or that I decided to have my face painted like a penguin at Jodie's birthday party. Thinking about it, I think mum has only put up the embarrassing pictures of me, I wonder if that's so she has something to laugh at when she's having a bad day.

As soon as we get to our lounge, we're surrounded by friends and family, who instantly swarm over Ollie. All the women wanting kisses and hugs and all the men wanting male company. As Isabella and I have no fathers, men are outweighed by women in our family and social groups. As much as I love Ollie, I know the minute Josh enters the room all the women will flock to him as he's so good looking. The men will probably stay with Ollie, not wanting to stand too close to such a heart throb! As if on cue I feel the atmosphere change, and without looking I know Josh has just walked in. One by one, the women start to peel away from Ollie and me to head to Josh and Isabella, the beautiful people. Should I be offended? Luckily, it looks like both of us are used to this.

'Right, now they've all met you and cleared off, I think it's time for me to get to know you better.'

Mum winks at Ollie as she says the last bit. Is she flirting? Oh my god, she is! My mum is flirting with my boyfriend! I really think she needs to start dating again, but she won't. She says it's too soon after my dad, although it's now been twenty-one years. In my mind that's not too soon. I think maybe that'll be one of my tasks before I go travelling again. I must help her meet someone as I can't imagine moving home after all this travelling, and the thought of her rattling around the place all alone makes me want to cry.

'That sounds like a good idea Mrs Hope. I'd like to get to know you too. Livs has told me so much about you.'

'She lets you call her Livs?'

The shock in mum's voice makes me giggle and Ollie blushes just enough for me to notice.

'Erm... well, not really, although she doesn't object quite so much anymore.'

Mum gives me a playful punch on the arm.

'Aw, my little girl must be in love!'

'Yes mum, thanks for that! I'm starving, who's doing the barbeque?'

Mum scans the room and the back garden before returning her gaze back to me. It looks like my plan of distraction has worked.

'Now Rita's here, we can start. As you're our guest of honour Ollie, would you like to start the barbeque? Don't worry if not, I'm sure Uncle Dylan will be happy to step in.'

I realise I've not seen Uncle Dylan yet, I must go and find him once I've checked Ollie's okay. Uncle Dylan is my dad's twin brother; he was my main father figure growing up. I'm suddenly sad I've let our close bond slip a bit recently. As soon as we found out Isabella was terminal, I've dedicated all of my time to her, and now Ollie. I've even let my relationship with mum slip a little, and we've always been more like friends than mother and daughter. I must keep up with my family life, although I never seem to have spare time these days!

'I'd be honoured to cook; if Uncle Dylan wants to help he's more than welcome. I just don't want to step on anybody's toes.'

'What a great idea, Uncle Dylan will want to do his usual checks to make sure you're good enough to be with one of his girls. His checks have become more thorough since his eldest daughter started dating though! You go and start the barbecue up, I'll go find Uncle Dylan and get him to bring the meat over.'

As if sensing we were talking about him, Uncle Dylan suddenly appears at me side engulfing me in a massive bear hug.

'Olivia!! I've missed you! Where have all my postcards and phone calls been? I've had to rely on your mum for updates, and you know what that's like. It does mean I've heard more about this American than I have about you. Is this him?'

Uncle Dylan hasn't looked at Ollie until he says the last bit, gesturing to Ollie with his thumb. This could get awkward.

'This is indeed him Uncle Dylan. Meet Ollie.'

'Oliver?'

'You may call me Oliver if you wish, sir'

Ollie's smile doesn't falter as he extends his hand, waiting for Uncle Dylan to shake it. Uncle Dylan waits for longer than necessary to shake it, and when he eventually does his knuckles go slightly white so I know he's gripping him hard.

'You have good manners for an American.'

I have to try really hard to stifle a giggle. You wouldn't believe Uncle Dylan was only forty-six; he sounds like such an old man. I wish he'd calm down the American comments though; it makes no difference where he's from, as long as he makes me happy, surely?

'Thank you sir, would you like to help me with the barbecue?'

'You can stop with all this sir nonsense now, call me Dylan. And yes, if you want to help me with the barbecue, you're more than welcome. Come along.'

Uncle Dylan heads off to the kitchen and Ollie quickly follows him, I do hope my favourite uncle plays nicely for a change.

I look around at all my lovely friends and family, and feel so honoured to have these people in my life. Then I catch a glimpse of Isabella standing with her mum and Josh. Josh has his arm around her shoulders and is talking animatedly to Rita, Izzy is smiling but I see through it, she's clearly in pain. The pain is getting worse too quickly! I don't know how much longer she has left, and the thought terrifies me. I can't breathe. I don't want to cause a scene and I know I need some space before I do just that! I rush up to my room where it's safe and quiet and collapse onto my bed, phew I can finally breathe.

##  Chapter Eleven

'If you have any questions, just ask.'

'Thank you Mel, that's great.'

It feels so weird to be working again after all this time, but needs must. Isabella and I are staying home for a while until we've saved enough for our trips to Thailand, New Zealand and Australia. We still have money left from before, but we don't want to worry at all about how much we have left when we're away from home. We've said from the start this is a once in a lifetime trip, so we want to be able to do anything and everything we get the opportunity to do, without limitations, so it's time to build up some funds.

The boys went back to America a couple of days after the BBQ. They were a massive hit with everybody; mum even said I need to marry Ollie, just not anytime soon. I'm still far too young for marriage, and if I even think about giving her a grandchild any time in the next few years then I should just think again! I love my mum, she's so funny.

After the boys left, Isabella and I did some fundraising such as a sponsored silence, a couple of car boot sales, and a charity party (a less formal version of a charity ball). But we decided it was worth me doing some temp work, as Izzy has money coming in from her photos. Izzy has been going for little day trips whilst I've been temping. She says the reason for the trips is to take photos for the galleries, but I think there's something else she's not told me, which worries me. I hoped she wouldn't keep secrets from me.

When Isabella first started feeling ill, I was the one who practically dragged her to the doctors. She refused to go for so long, but then she had a seizure at work one day which scared her. She didn't want to worry her mum so I went to the doctors with her. We were expecting them to say she had epilepsy or something similar. But when Isabella admitted the full extent of her symptoms and how long she'd been feeling ill, the doctor started to look serious. The fact her headache had been continuous but worse early in the morning, and so bad it was disturbing her sleep was the first on the doctor's invisible checklist. Then she mentioned she'd been feeling really sick, and had been sick a lot more frequently, she'd also been dizzy and fainted a couple of times but not told anybody. She's been tired and confused lately, she'd go somewhere without thinking, then snap back into the real world and have no idea where she was, or why.

The doctor kept his eyes on Isabella the whole time she spoke, not even pausing to look at the pad as he wrote notes. When she went quiet and looked close to tears, he turned to me and asked if her mood or behaviour had changed lately. I felt awful saying it in front of her, but I had to be honest. I explained to both the doctor and Isabella that she'd been really moody, not herself and sometimes a complete bitch for the last month or two. This seems to be a complete shock for Isabella who looked like I'd just slapped her in the face.

It would appear that was the last tick on the doctor's invisible checklist, because the questions stop and he sits quietly for a moment. The silence became deafening and I hear my poor friend scream out...

'What's wrong with me?'

'I don't want you to worry, because it's rare. But I need you to have some tests done at the hospital. There's a possibility you have a brain tumour.'

The words hit hard and I heard a long sorrowful scream, but even to this day I couldn't tell you whether the scream came from me or Isabella.

The next couple of weeks went by in a total blur. I held Izzy's hand, praying I could be strong and not cry whilst she told her mum. Then breaking down when the time came to tell my mum. She had to have so many tests at the hospital, most of which only her and her mum went to, so I don't know how bad they were. I tried to Google it once, but it made me feel sick. Reading what other people have gone through and what tests my beautiful, kind and caring best friend was having.

Because I got too upset at the time, and still do now, Isabella has never gone into full details with me. All she tells me and other people that ask is that she has terminal cancer. I overheard my mum talking to Rita about it once, and I got the gist. Isabella has a brain tumour which is growing too big and too fast to be removed, but it's also spread, which is very rare. That made me a smile a little, even at this terrible time. Trust my Izzy to get something really rare, she's not one to follow the crowds. She had a couple more seizures after her initial diagnosis but they've put her on special medication to stop them, so she's not had many since.

'I want to find my dad.'

When Isabella told me she needed to see me after work urgently, this isn't what I was expecting. I'm thankful this is all it is, I was terrified she was going to tell me something terrible.

'Have you told your mum yet?'

'No, that's what I need help with.'

'Oh no Izzy, this will crush her! Why do you want to find him? He's never tried to contact you.'

'Livs, you were with me when I told her I was ill and you coped. This will be easier, so man up will you? He's my dad and I have the right to some answers. Also, imagine looking for your dad and finding out he was dead, you'd be gutted wouldn't you? I want him to get the chance to meet me before I pop my clogs.'

'Well I can't comment on that as my dad's already dead, so I wouldn't be looking for him.'

'Olivia, for once please don't make everything about you!'

Isabella never calls me by my full name so I know she's annoyed, but what she's said has upset me. My dad would have stayed with me but he didn't get the chance. I don't cope well with death, and everyday I'm afraid the news will come that Isabella hasn't made it through the night. I try to stay strong and be brave for her, but I find it so hard to put on a front when inside my heart is being ripped apart. Her moods have been a lot worse lately, but I know it's just the illness. So I've carried on and let her treat me badly, but I don't think I can for much longer.

'Not everything is about you either Isabella. But let's move on and go find your mum shall we?'

Rita took the news a lot better than I thought she would. She was upset that Isabella suddenly wanted contact with her dad and his family, after always saying she wanted nothing to do with them. But I think she understood it was just because of the circumstances.

Rita told us Isabella's paternal grandparents had met her a few times when she was small, but then they emigrated when she was three so decided to cut all ties as they wouldn't be back often. Rita occasionally gets emails from them asking about Isabella, but they weren't ready to talk to Isabella yet. I couldn't help but feel sad about their missed opportunities, if ever I think about contacting someone but put it off, I'll think about this and go for it. Rita said she will email them to see if they can put her in contact with Greg. Isabella has asked that Rita not tell them the reason why through email. She wants to tell her dad herself, and then he can phone them and explain.

All the way through their chat Isabella stays very calm and organised, and I think that has a positive effect on Rita. I feel a bit useless just sitting there, and I wonder why Isabella needed me. I'm not complaining though, it feels nice to be needed by Isabella for once.

##  Chapter Twelve

We're finally on our way to Australia. This is one of the places I've been most looking forward to; I'm so excited although the flight seems to be taking forever!

We've had a really busy couple of months, Isabella and I went to Thailand a few days before the boys met us there, so we had some girly time and relaxed a bit. As soon as the boys arrived, we went on an elephant safari ride, which was one of the most amazing experiences ever. We sat on them in pairs, Ollie and me on one and Isabella and Josh on another. We rode them all through the jungle, and then at the end we helped to wash them and watched them play. They're beautiful and the most graceful animals, especially considering their size.

After the elephants, we volunteered at one of the local orphanages for a couple of weeks, before visiting all the must see places. So we managed to tick off a fair few things from the list before heading to New Zealand.

The boys really wanted to do the Lord of the Rings walk but Isabella and I didn't fancy it. They were going to go without us, but after a bit of an argument, they decided to stay with us and do the sights and relax instead. Izzy's started to get quite strong mood swings now, so can get away with kicking up a bit. She soon put the boys in their place when she reminded them why we're here, if it wasn't for her we'd all be at work. Josh had a little sulk like only Josh could, but Ollie agreed with Isabella and told his friend to think about Izzy.

'I think I've changed my mind about this! I'll never be able to look you two in the eye again.'

'Ollie may have a point. Isabella and I both have to do this to be able to cross off 76, 55 and maybe even 56, although the latter not together. But we never specified we'd have to do this together. Perhaps we could split into pairs for this bit? Ollie and I will head left, and you two can head right. Then we can all meet up later... when we're dressed.'

Izzy and Josh are both grinning at us like naughty children. I imagine they're both thinking we're prudes, but it took long enough for me to agree to Isabella putting skinny dipping and nudist beach on the list. I didn't even consider doing it in front of people I know, other than Ollie of course, he sees me naked all the time.

'Alright Livs, calm down. I'm not that desperate to see you and Ollie naked! Text me when you've had enough.'

With that, Isabella and Josh head off and I'm left with an awkward Ollie.

'Do we have to do this kitten? Can't we just tell them we've done it, and just go find a normal beach instead?'

I admit I'd love to go to a nice, normal beach, but it could be exciting to be naked in a public place. I doubt I'll be doing it again in a rush, so let's go for it!

'Don't be a pussy Ollie, let's go for it!'

Oh god, why did I just use that word? That's a horrible word I'd never normally use, I must have a confidence boost from knowing I'm about to get naked. I'm so pleased I remembered to shave this morning.

'I will not be spoken to like that Miss Hope; I think I'll have to punish you. Now come on, let's go find a spot.'

As I start to walk forward, Ollie spanks my ass gently but it takes me by surprise so I let out a little yelp. As I turn around to look at him, his eyes are twinkling. He throws his arms around my neck and whispers 'Let's go find somewhere hidden away.' Before kissing me passionately, oh my god, he actually wants to have sex on the beach! How will that work? What if someone sees? What if I get sand in places sand shouldn't go? Deep breath Olivia, calm down, you're now a confident woman in a lovely relationship. You're in a place you'll never return to, so even if someone does see, you'll never see them again!

I've just psyched myself up to follow Ollie onto the beach, when he stops so suddenly that I walk into him.

'Ollie, what's wrong? We're not...'

I stop mid sentence as I look around and realise what's stopped him in his tracks. The beach is full of naked people. Obviously we were expecting this, seeing as we're at a naturist beach, but these are all naked OAP's! I guess it makes sense as it's a work/school day, so it's only the OAP's who have enough spare time to hang out here during the day. And yes, the pun was intended there. I don't think I've ever seen so much hanging out in my life!

'Kitten, can we go? I don't think I can stay here surrounded by all these golden oldies.'

'Ollie, we're here now. We're doing this! Now put your sunglasses on, try to squint and let's keep walking until our eyes stop hurting.'

'Livs, please don't make me. They're all saggy and wrinkly.'

'I'll have sex with you in the sea, if we can find somewhere a little more secluded.'

'Great, let's go!'

'Oh Livs, I've got some really exciting news for you. I made some calls whilst I was sunbathing and I've managed to get you a little work experience in an animal park. They said they could offer two spaces, so I thought you and Ollie could go while Josh and I sunbathe and relax. What do you think? '

Isabella tells me this in a really casual manner, but I can see in her eyes that she's really excited about my reaction.

'How on earth did you wangle that?'

'I'm not going to lie to you; they weren't too keen on having you there as it's not something they usually do. They have for people in for an experience day, but these people usually pay them a fair amount.'

'So I ask you again, how did you get me and Ollie into this Isabella?'

'I told them I'm dying, you're my full time helper, and Ollie is a reporter who's writing about me and our journey. They couldn't say no to a dying girl and its good free publicity for them. So enjoy it!'

'Oh my god Izzy, I can't believe you'd use your illness like that!'

'Lighten up Livs, I've done you a favour. It's not a full lie anyway, you are helping care for me and Ollie is writing about me. I want to show you both my appreciation but you could be a bit more grateful!'

Just lately Isabella's moods have been getting worse. The smallest things set her off now, and we're arguing more. I find it hard because we never used to argue, but I know it's just the illness doing it to her. I'm trying to ignore the hate and anger she's started to show towards me at times. I don't want our last few months to be spent arguing, I hate confrontation, so it's easier to just back down. Isabella's always been an adventure seeker, wanting to try new things and explore in between lazing by the pool; but now she spends more and more time just lying by the pool or resting. It must be so hard for her, normally she'd have come with me and told Ollie to have a day with Josh, but she's obviously not feeling up to much these days.

'You're right Izzy, I'm sorry, this sounds really fantastic! Thank you so much for the opportunity, when is it?'

'You're welcome Hun anything for you! It's tomorrow morning, really early, you have to be there for 6am.'

'6am?!'

Ollie and I both shout that at the same time. He's just as bad as me when it comes to early mornings.

'Sorry guys! Maybe we should go back to the hotel room so you can get an early night.'

'Come on kitten, we need to leave in 10 minutes or we'll be really late.'

I force open one eye to see Ollie up and dressed, leaning over me with his hand outstretched, ready to poke me again until I get up.

'What time is it?'

I just about manage to mumble this question, before shutting my eye and drifting off again.

'Olivia!'

I feel his fingers prodding at my face, and then suddenly he's pulled me into a sitting position.

'I'm awake, I'm awake!

'Good, this is a fantastic opportunity and we don't want to be late. Now get up, it's a long drive there.'

'Ollie, stop yawning! We have to get back to work in a minute. Sam said as soon as she'd been to the loo, we were off to feed the kangaroos. So you need to wake up and get excited.'

'I am excited kitten; today's been fantastic so far. But that super early start has caught up with me, I'm knackered.'

I'm also really tired, but I'm not going to admit that because I'm having the best day. I'm already excited about coming back tomorrow for our last day. I'm starting to worry Ollie won't want to come back with me if we're both tired.

We've been working so hard today, I wasn't sure what we'd be doing at first. I kind of thought we'd just be looking at all the animals, and just learning more about them. In actual fact, we've been rushed off our feet since we arrived at quarter to six this morning. We've been meeting the animals one by one, and helping out each keeper with what needs doing at that particular time. So we've been feeding, cleaning out, grooming, helping with talks, and general dogsbody work.

Each group of animals has their own team of keepers to look after them, so they become experts with their animals and understand and communicate with them. They know their moods and can pick up when they're ill before the vets would know. Sam is the head keeper for the kangaroos, but she also trains up all the new staff; so she knows the basics about all the animals. She said she's treating us like we're new staff, so today we're doing what everyone does on their first week. Then tomorrow we each get to pick an animal and spend the day learning all about them, which is what new staff do in their second week. Although they don't get to choose which animal, they just get put with whichever animal needs a new keeper. I'm slightly panicked about being without Ollie, but I doubt we'll choose the same animals, so I guess I need to be brave. So far, my favourite animals have been the meerkats and otters. But as we're in Australia, I ought to choose one of their native animals, so I'm looking forward to meeting the kangaroos, wombats and dingoes' today.

'Okay guys; are you ready to meet the roos?'

My face lights up as I squeal in delight. Sam takes that as my answer, and leads the way.

The past two days have by far been the best two of my life! Before, I thought I wanted to either work as a vet, or as a marine biologist, but now I think I want to work in an animal park or zoo. Hopefully I won't need to go back to college or university for that, which is a bonus as that's what was putting me off.

Ollie loved his time there too, neither of us wanted to leave. Ollie is now busy writing an article about what we got up to, and of course updating his blog about Isabella. I read his first draft and couldn't help laughing; he wrote a massive essay about what he'd been up to; how he'd spent the day with alligators and reptiles. Explaining about their routine and what they ate. Then at the end, he added one sentence saying Isabella sunbathed with her boyfriend Josh and relaxed by the pool at the hotel.

Considering this was written for Isabella's column, I persuaded him to rewrite it so her bit was more exciting, and his was the minimum, but then he could write his own article about his experience. He begrudgingly agreed, and with him writing his own article it meant he could include a bit about my day with the kangaroos. It was exciting being interviewed for a real newspaper, even if the interview was being conducted by my boyfriend.

While I was answering his questions about the keepers for the kangaroos, if they were helpful, friendly, etc, I decided to leave out the part where one of the male keepers asked me out. I've not even told Isabella because I was so gobsmacked. Sam had left me with him, Mike, because he was similar in age to me. He's 26 and your typical Australian male, with the wavy blonde surfer hair, gorgeous tan and slim muscular build. Mike had been really kind to me, making me feel really welcome. He was flirting right from the start, but I thought he was just being friendly. He invited me to go surfing with him one morning, which reminded me I wanted to take the boys surfing. When I declined surfing, he asked me for a meal or even a drink. It was a bit awkward after that, but luckily he kept friendly and professional until the end. It's safe to say nobody will find out about that.

##  Chapter Thirteen

'Have I told you how hot you girls look on your surfboards?'

'Shut it Josh! Compliments won't help your surfing skills. One more time, show me how you get up to standing.'

It's so funny watching Isabella try to teach Josh to surf. You wouldn't think until recently Isabella was scared of swimming in the sea. Luckily for me, Ollie has surfed a few times so only needed a little reminder. We went out a few times, but when I saw how much Josh was struggling, I brought Ollie into the shallows so I could help Izzy teach Josh.

'Babe, I don't think I can do it. I think I'm just built for swimming and looking good. Why don't we go and have a bit of fun in the sea instead?'

'No Josh, you're not getting out of it! You said you wanted to learn, so I won't let you quit. I do however give up, so Livs will have to take over. Ollie and I are going to catch some waves.'

Josh gives me a sulky puppy dog look and I almost give in and let him go for a swim instead. No, I must be strong, if I can teach Isabella I can teach anybody!

'Sorry Josh, you heard her.'

By lunchtime we're all surfing like pros, well, Josh is surfing competently at least. He loves it now he knows how to do it, and has decided to become a beach bum when he goes home. We're sitting in a gorgeous beach front cafe for lunch, with an ice cold cider, well I have coke, but the others have cider.

Isabella gets a call from her mum and goes to the sit on the beach. She looks so beautiful, sitting on the sand with the glittery sea in front of her and her shadow dancing beside her. I can only see the back of her but I know she's smiling; she always does when talking to or about her mum. A pang of homesickness hits me; I must call my mum tonight. I haven't spoken to her in a couple of days and I realise I miss her. As I'm thinking this I let out a sigh, Ollie wraps his arm around my shoulders looking to see what has upset me. As soon as he notices the beautiful view of Isabella he whips out his camera and takes some snaps.

'This will make a beautiful canvas. I'm going to use it in tomorrow's column, but I think I'll also order a print to be sent to her mum.'

'That's a beautiful gesture Ollie. Rita will love it!'

'She's tracked him down! I have my dad's email address! I can finally contact him and ask him all the questions I want to!'

Isabella practically skips back over to us. Her smile as wide as a Cheshire cat, I didn't think she'd be this excited about contacting her dad. She never talks about him; if she does she calls him the sperm donor. At least I hear stories about my dad, see pictures, and know his family. I feel like I know and I love him even though I never met him. Isabella knows nothing of her dad and has always said that's how she wants it to stay. I guess everything's been put into perspective now. I wonder who this meeting will be harder for. The man who gets to meet his daughter for the first time, knowing he won't have time to get to know her. Or the girl who has to meet her dad just to ask questions that won't really help her in the grand scheme of things. I feel heartbreak coming her way.

'That was fast, what's next then?'

'I'm going to email him; will you help me write it Livs?'

'I'm pleased you've tracked him down baby, if you don't need our help do you mind if Ollie and I go play pool?'

'That's fine baby, I only need Livs for this, so go enjoy have a break from me and have some fun for a bit.'

Josh leans over and gives Isabella a quick kiss before rushing off, rubbing his hands together in glee. Ollie shrugs his shoulders at me in a casual way, before kissing me and heading off in search of his friend.

Dear Greg,

This is a hard email to write, so I'm going to get straight to the point. My name is Isabella Webber, I am your daughter. I understand you didn't want anything to do with me but there are certain circumstances. These circumstances mean if you ever wanted to meet me, you'd need to do so in the next couple of months, or you won't get the chance. I don't want to go into full details through email or guilt you into meeting me if you didn't want to.

I'm currently travelling the world, but nothing is planned. So if you want to meet up, just give me a couple of weeks to plan a route home.

I hope you're well and I hope to hear from you soon.

Isabella xxx

'Are you sure it sounds okay Livs?'

'Yes definitely. Are you sure you want to send it?'

'Yes! Will you send it for me Livs? I can't bring myself to push the button.'

Isabella is visibly shaking, so I take her phone from her, press send and then switch it off and put it in my bag.

'There you go, it's sent. And I'm looking after your phone so you don't check it every five minutes.'

'Thanks Livs. Now let's go find our men, and take my mind of my dad. We're in Australia, let's enjoy it!'

##  Chapter Fourteen

'I've changed my mind Livs! Will you go tell him I'm not here and ask him to go away?'

'No Isabella, you have to do this! Now go answer the door before the poor man has to ring the bell again. He's probably just as nervous about meeting you, as you are about meeting him.'

Greg is standing outside Isabella's front door and has been for almost five minutes now.

He replied to Izzy's email with 48 hours, saying he'd wanted to meet her for a while but thought she wouldn't want anything to do with him. Apparently, he'd decided to leave it up to her as he was the bad guy for abandoning her. They exchanged a few emails before setting a date for their first meeting.

The boys wanted to come back to England with us, but Izzy decided she needed to do this alone; although this morning Izzy rang me and begged me to come over.

As much as Ollie wanted to come back, he knew it was time for him to head home and back to work. Josh however was gutted to be sent home, he'd quit his job when he decided to travel with us so he could spend as much time as possible with Isabella. He's now decided to use this time off to practise his surfing skills. Izzy and I both suggested he get some temp work, or see if he could get his old job back so he could get some more money for our next adventure. But I could tell this advice went in one ear and out of the other, I guess he must have some money saved up.

'Isabella, will you please open the door!'

Izzy slowly leaves the room and heads to the front door; she's really dragging her feet over this. I don't know how to help her, I think she needs to do this alone so I'm going to stay in the kitchen and make drinks and snacks instead.

'Livs, can you get us a pot of tea? Maybe even some cake?'

Isabella shouts this from her lounge; she's trying to get me in there. Maybe I should help her out.

'Here are your drinks and snacks. It's nice to meet you Mr... umm... sorry I don't actually know your surname.'

When I say this, Isabella turns to him expectedly and it occurs to me that she doesn't know either.

'My name is Greg Lloyd but please call me Greg. Am I right in thinking you're Olivia, the young lady who's travelling the world with Isabella?'

'Yes that's right Greg. Shall I leave you both now, I'm sure there are loads of questions and things to catch up on.'

Isabella and Greg look really worried at this statement, so I pull out a chair and sit down, ready to listen quietly.

I'm totally shocked when Greg admits he not only has three other children, but one of them is actually older than Isabella. He explained he didn't have contact with his eldest daughter until she was ten. He hadn't told Rita about his daughter as he was ashamed he'd become a dad at fourteen and abandoned her at seventeen; when Rita fell pregnant, he couldn't cope. He met his current wife when he was nineteen and knew instantly that he wanted to spend his life with her, so he told her the truth about his two estranged daughters. She persuaded him to meet and be a part of their lives. He tracked down his eldest daughter, Ruth, but not Isabella.

While he was explaining this, Isabella sat silently staring at him, but not questioning any of it. In the end, it was me who asked why he hadn't been in contact with Izzy. He stared blankly at me for a moment, before realising that by Izzy I meant Isabella. He clearly didn't want to go into details of why he didn't track Izzy down and it hit me like a tonne of bricks. It must have been Rita who stopped him. All this time she'd blamed him, but really it was her.

Isabella never knew her mum was in contact with Greg's parents and I wonder if she'd ever have found out about them if she wasn't dying. Greg was very diplomatic about it, he said he'd had no idea his parents had Rita's details and he couldn't track her down. I'm not sure if Isabella believed him or not, but I'm not going to bring it up if she doesn't.

'So I have a sister who's twenty four, a sister who's fourteen and a brother who's twelve?'

'Yes, that's right. Would you like to meet them? The youngest two live with me, and I speak to my eldest at least once a week. Maybe we could arrange to have a get together soon?'

'I'd like that. I've always wanted siblings, although Olivia is like a sister.'

'Fantastic! I'll sort something out with them and let you know. So, can I ask why you suddenly wanted to meet me?'

'You can. I'll warn you it's a long and sad story though. In fact Livs, we'll definitely need more tea for this.'

Greg stayed for most of that day. Once I'd made the tea, I decided it'd be a good time to leave them to it. Isabella promised to call me as soon as he left, and she was good to her word. She phoned me that night, and we talked about nothing else for two hours.

As happy as I was for her, deep, deep down inside my stomach was knotting. I felt sick with rage that I'll never get to meet my dad. My dad was the hero; Greg was the teenage waste of space, the sperm donor. Now Greg is all she wants to talk about.

After the first meeting, Isabella and Greg spoke daily and within a week Isabella had met her new step mum, brother and both her sisters. They went for a family meal, which resulted in another two hour phone call where Izzy raved about her brand new family. After talking to her, I phoned Ollie and cried down the phone to him. I felt awful because Izzy's so happy and this should make me happy, not jealous. I also felt terrible for poor Ollie having to listen to me rant and cry, and being too far away to do anything other than listen and beg me not to cry because he loves me.

To top off my bad mood and depression, Ollie couldn't make it home for Christmas, as he had too much work on. Either that or too many swanky parties or launches he just had to attend for work and plans with his family. Isabella had to split her time between her parents, the rest of her family and quality time with Josh. Josh has abandoned his family at Christmas for the first time ever, so he could spend his one and only Christmas with Izzy.

It didn't hit me until after New Year that it was almost 100% certain that was Isabella's last Christmas. Why did I spend the whole time being angry and jealous? I should have been happy her last one had been perfect for her.

I feel like such a bitch. I try to talk to my mum about it, but she just tells me to snap out of it. She had to deal with losing my dad at the same time as being pregnant, so her hormones were going crazy. She told me I need to stay positive and supportive; I can keep the depression for when Isabella's gone, and not a moment sooner.

My mum had a point, so since then I've planned some more things from our list. Josh is staying in England for the foreseeable, until we know what we'll be doing as our next big trip. So I've had to plan things suitable for three people, and which either Josh or I will not become a gooseberry.

We started by taking a really expensive car for a test drive, which was amazing! We each got to drive it, although Josh drove it for longer than Isabella and I put together.

Isabella and Josh combined 35 – sleep under the stars, with 28 – stay up all night and watch the sun rise. But obviously they altered it slightly, so they slept for a few hours apparently. I decided to give these two a miss for the time being, as they're quite romantic things to do. So I didn't want to intrude, and I'd really rather do them with Ollie at some point.

We didn't want to do any of the major things without Ollie, and he's still swamped at work. So we worked through lots of the smaller things like; 18 – hold a tarantula, and 52 – scream until you lose your voice, amongst many others.

##  Chapter Fifteen

'I'd like it if Ollie could come over for a bit soon, Livs.'

'You're telling me. But shouldn't that be my line Izzy?'

'I just think the sooner he can get here, the better. You're going to need his support soon, and I need to have a big talk with him about the dos and don'ts where you're concerned. I need to know he's going to look after you, although Josh has promised he'll look after you too.'

'Why are you talking like this Isabella? You're starting to scare me now.'

'Don't make a big deal about it Livs, but I don't I have much longer left. The pain is getting pretty bad. It could just be we've done a lot of the list lately, but even so I think it'd be for the best if Ollie could come over for a bit.'

I can feel the tears burning hot at the corners of my eyes. I need to get out; I must not let her see me cry this time.

'Okay drama queen, I'll go phone him now. Can I get you anything first?'

I can hear the shake in my voice as the lump swells in my throat; I know Isabella will have noticed. I can't bring myself to look at her to see her reaction.

'Can you ask Josh to come and keep me company while you're on the phone? He's fixing the fence for mum at the moment.'

'Of course I will. See you in a bit Iz.'

'Thanks Livs. Oh and Livs... I love you!'

The tears are streaming now.

'Love you too Isabella.'

As soon as I spoke to Ollie, he booked his flight over here. He's so lucky he can travel and work, if he couldn't I'm pretty sure he'd be jobless like Josh by now.

Ollie arrived yesterday and was shocked by the change in Isabella. She's gone downhill quickly in the last week and it's heartbreaking to watch. I think it was harder for Ollie as he hadn't seen her in a long time so really noticed, whereas Josh and I have seen her getting worse each day. To give him his due, Josh has been amazing. Rita and I are finding it hard to stay positive and upbeat; sometimes we find it hard to keep it together in front of Isabella. But Josh has never once let the smile leave his face. He's joked and teased and told Izzy to get off her ass and get her own drink when she's asked for one. To start with, I thought he was terrible making her move when she was in pain, but now I realise that around him Isabella is her old self. The pain leaves her when Josh is next to her.

'Josh proposed!!!'

Ollie and I had been chilling out at my house watching films, as he's too jet lagged to do much. I hadn't even heard Isabella come into my house, so when she burst into my lounge with Josh I was shocked. Josh is standing behind her with a big, dopey grin on his face. I would've been shocked by the announcement anyway, but more so with her dramatic entrance.

'Oh my god, what did he say? How did he say it? Where were you? What did you say?'

'Ha, so many questions Livs! Of course I said yes! Josh do you want to answer the rest, or shall I?'

'You can baby, I think it's time me and Ollie go for a celebratory drink. Pub mate?'

'Sounds like a plan to me, unless you ladies aren't happy about it?'

Isabella and I grin at each other. We have so much to talk about and plan, we don't need men around getting in the way.'

'Go for it!'

We say this in unison; I swear we could talk for each other sometimes.

'Have you set a date yet?'

I've asked this question even before the boys leave; I'm too excited to wait.

'We have, we'll be getting married in just over a week. So on February 2nd, and we'll be going on honeymoon to Paris the day after. I've spent the morning making calls and booking things. Sorry I didn't tell you straight away, but I wanted to check we could do it first. It's too late to get married in a church, so we've got a meeting with a registrar later today to confirm we're allowed to do this at such short notice. Apparently you have to give notice or something like a month before, so people can object if they want. But I'm finding rules get bent for a dying girl. If we can't do it legally, we'll just have a blessing now and fill out the paper work at a later date.'

I'm gobsmacked. How has my ditzy, chilled out best friend and her beach bum boyfriend, sorry fiancé, arranged so much already?

'Wow, you've planned it all already! When did he pop the question?'

I feel stupid using the phrase pop the question, seriously how old am I?

'Oh yeah, you have questions. Okay, so he asked me last night just after we left you and Ollie, we were in my bed. He didn't get down on one knee; he just said it in the spur of the moment. I think possibly it was due to lack of blood to his brain, but afterwards he promised he'd meant it and we went online and started planning.'

'Why did he have lack of blood to the brain? Was he hurt?'

'Oh Livs, you're so naïve! What could we have been doing in my bed that would have lead to that?'

'Oh god Izzy, I didn't need to know that!'

Isabella gives me such a wicked smile and I burst out laughing, causing her to do the same.

Isabella's plan of nobody will say no to a dying girl backfired. She begged the registrar to let her get married within a week, but they were adamant they had to stick to the law. Isabella and Josh also looked into running off to Gretna Green to get married, but they still had to legally give notice; so instead, they're having a non legal wedding.

They've hired our local village hall and set it up with chairs either side, so Isabella will still have an aisle to walk down. After the service they will move the chairs to the edges and enjoy a sharing buffet, this is where each guest brings their own favourite party food. Izzy and I spent all of yesterday decorating the room and finalising details. I'm amazing Isabella has actually managed to plan a wedding in a week. I know it's not a legal marriage but it's still a wedding. They will have a legal ceremony when they get back from their honeymoon. As they can't do it legally, they weren't allowed a registrar or vicar, so instead Isabella's granddad will be running the service. Izzy did print off what she wanted him to say, but he refused, saying he knew what he wanted to say about her and Josh.

'Livs, stop daydreaming and help me with my hair.'

I snap back to the present and see Isabella stood in front of me in her pyjamas, her make-up done to perfection but her hair a frizzy mess. Her hair is never messy, so I wonder what she's been doing.

'I know what you're thinking. My head was hurting so I tried to bury myself in pillows, it didn't work but I don't care. I'm getting married today!!'

The venue is stunning. You'd never think that it'd been decorated on a shoestring budget in just a couple of days. There are flowers and butterflies everywhere you look. The chairs have big posh bows on them and there's a red carpet for Isabella to walk down.

As it's a small service, I'm the only bridesmaid. I'm wearing a full length purple dress, with tiny gold sequins covering the top and cascading down to my hips. As its February and cold, actually it's snowing so it's a tad more than just cold! I have a gold and cream fluffy shrug to keep my arms warm.

When Isabella was finally dressed with her hair and make-up perfected, I cried. She's never looked so beautiful in her life, her natural waves have been transformed in natural looking ringlets, and her brown eyes have been brought to lie with dark, smoky eye make-up. She looks like Keira Knightly but with boobs. Her dress is simple, a light gold A-Line dress with similar sequin detail to mine. It has a short train and she's wearing a purple shrug, the same colour as my dress.

Isabella was so lucky to find her dress in her size at such short notice. My mum made the few alternations she needed, so now the dress fits her like a second skin.

I was more nervous than Isabella as we walked down the aisle, but as soon as I saw the boys waiting for us, I felt like we were flying down the aisle. This must be what it'd feel like to marry Ollie. I know I'm young but I know Ollie's my partner for life, we'll get married. I know this for sure, it's just a matter of time.

'You look beautiful, the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen.'

Josh whispers this to Isabella as we get to the end. I look around to see who heard him and realise there's a bunch of people sat on one side looking tired and emotional. They must be Josh's jet lagged family. Clearly full of mixed emotions, happy Josh's met someone he loves enough to marry, but devastated the woman he's marrying will be dead within the year; leaving Josh alone and a widower.

There wasn't a single dry eye during the service, even Isabella's granddad choked through and had to keep stopping. I don't know if everyone was thinking the same sort of things, or if they were just having regular wedding emotions. All in all, I'd say it was the best day of my life, albeit an emotional one, but a fantastic one all the same.

##  Chapter Sixteen

'Are you sure they want us there kitten?'

'Yes I'm sure Ollie, and even if I'm not it's a bit late to change our minds now. The plane will be landing in half an hour. It's not like if you get on the wrong bus and can ask the driver to stop and let you off!'

'Obviously, I know that. I was just checking.'

I didn't mean to snap at Ollie, I'm just a bit sleep deprived and emotional.

Isabella and Josh left for their honeymoon in Paris five days ago, and I've been depressed and moody ever since. It's so horrible because I want her to have a fantastic time and enjoy some quality time with her new husband, but I just can't help but feel jealous. I'm missing out on some precious time with her, when she doesn't have much time left.

Isabella phoned me two days ago to tell me what I'd been up to and to see how I was, and I couldn't hold back the tears. She said the reason she was calling was because she missed me, and wanted me to join her and Josh for the last few days. But I wonder if she'd have invited us had I not cried down the phone.

I'm so looking forward to seeing my best friend, and spending some quality time with my man in the most romantic city in the world.

Ollie will be heading back to America soon as he only wants to take short breaks from work. Everybody is so impressed with his recent articles, especially the ones about Isabella. There have even been talks of him making editor, or even starting his own paper; it's really exciting. I'm so proud of him, but as usual Ollie just shrugs it off.

'I love you Kitten!'

Ollie's voice breaks my daydream. I don't know what I've done to deserve him, but I'm very grateful.

'I love you too! Please will you pass me a mint and hold my hand now, we'll be landing soon.'

'I thought you crossed off fly without fear? Were you lying?'

'No! I'm not lying but I thought maybe you were scared. I don't need to hold your hand, I was just being kind.'

'I see. I'm fine thanks Kitten; I don't need a hand to hold. I may read a chapter of my book if you don't need me to comfort you.'

'Just hold my hand, you jackass.'

'I've missed you Livs! I love you!'

This is about the twelfth time Isabella's told me this on the taxi ride back to the hotel. I think I misjudged the situation; it'd appear Isabella's missed me just as much as I've missed her. I think it's because we've now gotten so used to travelling the world together, it seemed odd for her to be away while I was still at home.

'You're going to love the hotel; we're right in the centre of the golden triangle, right in the thick of it all. Mine and Josh's room is gorgeous, the bed is big enough to sleep our whole family in, and when we order room service the dude leaves our food in a separate side room so we don't have to see them. Our bathroom has a massive shower cubicle, but the whole room is tiled so it's like a wet room. We have our own mini sauna, its lush! Yours won't be as grand as ours, but it'll still be fantastic.'

'I can't believe how lucky we were to get a room there at such short notice, especially if it's as amazing as you say it is.'

'Money can buy you anything Livs.'

'I can't believe how long that queue was, you wouldn't think it was February would you?'

Josh looks rather put out as he states this. I don't think he's actually looking for an answer, but I reply anyway.

'I know, it's mad how busy it is. I guess it's because we've chosen to take an evening tour.'

'Yeah Livs is right, everybody wants to see the city at night; especially the Eiffel Tower.'

'Alright girls, you're right there... but why did security check your bags? It's too full on! All we're doing is getting on a boat for an hour to see some sights.'

'Mate, will you lighten up? Put your headphones on and listen to the guide telling us what we're looking at. Girls, I suggest you do the same.'

Aw, my man, the voice of reason. He seems to have put Josh in his place as he's now put his headphones on and is cuddled up to Isabella. They're both looking out at the beautifully lit buildings; his bad mood seems to have faded.

'I love you baby.'

'I love you too Kitten, now put on your headphones.'

Paris was beautiful, by far my favourite place I've ever visited. The boat tour was amazing and I actually listened to all the information without getting bored. I didn't like the fact you had to listen to it through headphones though, it felt quite antisocial.

We'd decided not to climb the Eiffel Tower as I'm not a fan of heights, and Izzy gets tired too quickly. But after seeing it all lit up and looking stunning, we realised we couldn't come all the way to Paris and not climb it.

After speaking to a few people, I decided to take their advice and only go to the third highest level, as it's enclosed but you still get to see the whole of Paris laid out around you. I was happy looking out into the distance; but when I looked down and it looks like the cars were driving through the foot of the tower, I freaked out. It took a long time for Ollie and Isabella to calm me down. It was so embarrassing; I can see why Josh sneaked off!

We only had a few days left, so didn't get to go to quite as many places as I'd have liked. We went to the Musée d'Orsay as Uncle Dylan had told me a few years ago that he and my dad went there as children. It used to be a train station before it became a museum, and they were both obsessed with trains. Funnily enough, the boys said they'd rather go there than to the Louvre, even though that's classed as one of the most important museums in the world.

Paris will be really hard to top, but I'm looking forward to trying.

##  Chapter Seventeen

Poor Isabella is getting noticeably worse each day. We know she's not got long left so we made a slight detour on the home from Paris before Ollie has to go back to America. So now we're in Amsterdam and ready to cross off 22 – learn to pole dance, 39 – get high, and maybe some more along the way.

Josh found it crazy that Isabella and I hadn't been high before. I explained we were younger than him, and good girls! Although we've both been drunk many times before; once I even got so drunk I decided to be a traffic warden and stop the traffic. I stood in the middle of the road for far too long, holding up my hand to any car coming my way and shouting "halt". It was only when a hearse complete with coffin in the back almost ploughed me down, that one of my friends sobered up enough to drag me out of the road. I don't remember anything from that after Jägerbomb's in the pub. When my friends told me what happened, I was so scared and decided to not go any further than tipsy again. I know I wouldn't have got in that state if Isabella had been out with me; she'd have looked after me.

'We're going to do some trips and sight-seeing as well as going to hash bars right?'

'Yes Olivia, you and old man Ollie can do what you like, while Isabella and I enjoy ourselves.'

'Josh, I want to explore as well. Once I've taken the edge off the pain I want to go ice skating on the frozen lakes, I want to visit the Stedelijk Museum, visit Anne Frank's house and visit a traditional flea market; just to name a few. I'm not just coming here for the drugs and a morbid fascination to go to the red light district.'

'Alright ladies, you win. We'll do a mixture.'

'Well done Josh that was very mature of you. The red light district was mentioned and you didn't say anything. You must have grown up a lot since you got married.'

Ollie pats Josh on the shoulder as he says this, but I see the realisation hit Josh, and I know Ollie's pride is about to be tested.

'The red light district, can we go there first? Can we go there now?'

Isabella slaps him playfully, but her eyes are twinkling with intrigue.

'I'd like to cross off have a threesome on the trip, but I think we need some drink or drugs first to get me in the mood.'

My stomach instantly knots as I'm lead off by Josh and Isabella, I look to Ollie for support but just feel sick.

None of us had really done our homework on Amsterdam, so we were a little confused as to how to find hash bars. It was more confusing when we eventually work out they were called coffee shops, which we just assumed were regular café's until Ollie asked a local. I was shocked, imagine if an old couple came looking for coffee and cake, and ended up in a coffeehouse here! I think they need to rename them.

I was also surprised to see they didn't sell any alcohol, I'd just assumed the two went hand in hand. But no, you either have one or the other here.

The staff members were really kind and helpful, but they were asking too many questions like: "do you want to get high or stoned" to figure out what we wanted to order. Isabella and I were clueless so we went to sit down whilst the boys ordered for us.

Ollie and Josh argued about what to get. Ollie wanted us to start with joints as they're weaker due to the tobacco in them, but Josh wanted us to try space cakes as we don't smoke. Josh won and went against two members of staff recommendation to get one to share, and got us three to share between the four of us.

We eat our cakes and waited for the effects to take place, but they didn't so we though it hadn't worked. So when our drinks ran low, the boys went to get us fresh ones and another two cakes for us to share. I got halfway through my second one when it hit me! My vision went blurry and when I blinked I saw spiralling colours. I opened my eyes again and all different geometrical shapes started twisting and dancing in front of me. I could no longer see my friends, and when I reached out my hand for Ollie, nobody was there, I was all alone. I tried to stand up but felt so dizzy I fell back in my chair. The room was spinning out of my control and my limbs felt too heavy to lift me to safety. Sweat pouring from every part of my body and the sickness was overcoming me.

The next thing I know, I wake up in my hotel room with Ollie cuddled into me protectively. Every part of me hurts. I slide away from Ollie and force myself to sit up and look around the room for clues. On my bedside table is one empty and one half full two litre of coke, suddenly I'm so thirsty I need to drink the other half right now.

'Morning Kitten, how are you feeling?' Ollie mumbles in his half asleep state.

'Ollie, what happened last night? I think I might be dying.'

Ollie opens his eyes and pulls up to sit next to me.

'You're not dying kitten; you had a bad trip last night. I think you must have had a panic attack because you passed out. Niles helped me look after you until I felt normal again, and then I brought you here to look after you.'

'What about Isabella and Josh? Are they okay?'

'Yeah they're both fine. Josh feels bad about you as he didn't realise how strong it was and how little you need to get you high. Isabella said she felt better once it'd worn off a little. They were both still going strong when I left to take you home.'

'Did Isabella not help you look after me?'

'Err, no... But it's fine, I didn't need help. You were very well behaved... most of the time anyway!!'

'Oh god, what did I do when I wasn't being well behaved?'

'You decided you wanted to dance... to Night Fever on the table. When Niles was helping me get you off the table, you thought he was me, declared your love to him and stuck your tongue in his mouth. You also wanted to talk to everyone, even if they didn't want to talk to you.'

'Oh my god, I'm never drinking or taking any sort of drugs again!'

'You're only twenty-one, never is a long time. I can say after last night, I won't be doing drugs again. I used to enjoy the odd joint in my teens, but I didn't enjoy it at all last night. I think I'm too old for this lifestyle now.'

'Me too, can we go somewhere cultured today now we've both happily admitted we're old before our time? '

'We sure can Kitten. I'll phone Josh and see if they'd like to join us.'

Josh and Isabella had stayed out half the night, so didn't want to leave the hotel room until that evening. We had tea with them before they went to another coffee shop, then Ollie and I went for a long, romantic walk before seeing a show and heading to bed. This is how the rest of the holiday went.

Isabella was very proud to tell me she could tick have a threesome off her list, along with all the other ones we'd achieved out here.

Izzy and Josh seemed to have been half cut the whole time we were out here, but they loved it. Half of the stories they told us made me cringe, and I felt very old before my time.

##  Chapter Eighteen

'Here you go girls I've got the answer to your problems; this box set is called Idiot Abroad. They send Karl Pilkington to see the Seven Wonders of the World, so as my wife is too sick to see them herself; I've brought them to her, and you of course Olivia. Also this will be more fun because the guy's a moron, and he's in the hands of Ricky Gervais.'

'Aw, thanks baby! I love him on the Ricky Gervais Show so I'm sure I'll love this. He's not a moron I think he's got a point with most of what he says actually! Could you put it on for me? Livs you want to watch now don't you?'

'Yeah sure' Josh and I answer in unison, although it sounds completely different with our accents.

Josh puts on the first DVD before leaving us alone in Isabella's bedroom.

Since we got home from Amsterdam, Isabella's been going downhill really fast. She now spends most of her time in the house, usually in her bed like she is now. She drifts in and out of sleep, or pain induced comas. Ollie stayed for a couple of days after we got back from Amsterdam, so I didn't see her for about 48 hours. It was the biggest shock seeing her in this state, after seeing her basically pain free and high as a kite in Amsterdam.

Josh has been amazing, looking after her and also Rita who's really struggling. We knew it would be hard, especially near the end. But nothing can prepare you for what it's really like; nothing can prepare you for seeing your best friend fade before your very eyes. I try to focus my attention on Karl Pilkington, but I can feel the flood gates open and the tears cascading my face with silent sobs. I pray Isabella won't notice.

'Please don't cry Livs. I don't want people to be sad when I go. Please promise me you'll celebrate my life and not mourn my death.'

I can't answer Isabella without a wobble to my voice so I simply nod.

'Also, promise me you'll complete the list and if you can, get the boys to go with you. If I don't get a chance to sort through my things, please make sure my dad and siblings get something to remember me by. I want you to choose where to scatter my ashes; I want to be somewhere foreign and exciting. Somewhere I've not been before and somewhere that makes you happy. Also, as much as I hate the thought of it; I need you to help Josh move on and find love again. We still haven't officially married and it looks like we won't be able to now, so he won't have the whole dead wife thing to explain, just a dead fiancée.'

'Isabella, I... I'm not sure...'

'You won't remember all of this so go grab a pen and paper. Let's write my will as you've interrupted Karl Pilkington now.'

'Well I didn't half look like a gambling addict did I? They looked at me like I had a problem and I cleared them out of all their £1 cards, but I bought us 100 £1 scratch cards each.'

'Ha, Livs you got them from the same shop? No wonder they thought you probably had issues!'

'Yeah okay, I guess it was a little lazy of me. Here's a penny, now let's get scratching.'

Izzy and I silently scratch away. The first time I win £500 I squeal with delight and the first time Isabella wins £1000 she cheers, but after that we're completely silent. Between the two of us, our "win" pile just keeps growing; and by the end of it we've won £2,753. We agree to split it in half; my half will help cover my travelling costs for the rest of our list. Izzy's half will cover the cost of her funeral so her mum won't have to worry at all.

'Well that was intense! Shall we watch the final idiot abroad now?'

The last week has flown by; we've watched all of both series' of Idiot Abroad except this last episode. Josh has watched a few with us, but uses most of that time to do jobs around the house and help Rita with whatever she needs doing.

Isabella's had a lot of visitors, some of which have come to say goodbye as sadly they don't think they'll get the chance to see her again. These were definitely the hardest ones for Isabella to deal with, because in her mind she's not going away anytime soon. I think it's really selfish of these people to do it, I know they're just trying to get closure... but to upset Isabella in the meantime is selfish. I had to take Rita out yesterday so Greg and his kids could come over and visit Izzy. I'm gutted for Isabella that she didn't get to meet her dad sooner, because they're so close now. I so wish I had the opportunity to meet my dad.

After a very intense week of visitors Isabella had another bad turn, her final bad turn. The doctor came to give her some medicine to make her last moments as pain free as possible, this knocked her out and she was barely able to stay awake, let alone talk with it. So when the time came to take the next dose she refused until she'd had some very important talks. First, Ollie was called into her bedroom where he stayed for just over half an hour and came out red eyed and snotty nosed. As soon as he came back into the room, he told Josh to go to her before falling into my arms. Feeling him shake as tears coursed their way through his big, manly body was enough to set me off. We held each other as we cried and rocked until I heard Josh scream out from the bedroom and Rita went running up to them. I'd forgotten Rita was in the room, I must hold it together for her. I can be brave I know I can, I have to be, soon I'll have to be strong for myself. I look at the photo Ollie took of Isabella on the beach all those months ago, it's now hanging up above the fireplace as a large canvas. I will channel Isabella's strength even if... I can't finish that sentence.

Rita and Josh are gone for ages, it must be well over an hour. By the time they come back into the room I've fallen asleep in Ollie's arms, I think I'm emotionally exhausted. Rita gently shakes me awake.

'I'm sorry to wake you sweetheart but you need to see her now. The pain is getting too much for her but she won't take any more meds until she has spoken to you. She said she's saving the best until last!'

Oh God I'm crying before I've even got to Isabella's room. I push open her door and see her propped up against a mountain of pillows. I run over to her and throw my arms across her frail body and for the first time in a very long time, longer than I can remember, Isabella cries. We stay like that until my tears have soaked into her hair and I can no longer breathe.

'No more tears now Livs, this is not a goodbye, because goodbye means I'll be gone and forgotten about. I'm always going to be with you, I will be your guardian angel. I will be with you every step of your life. When you and Ollie get married and have a beautiful daughter, who you will naturally call Isabella, you will wish I was with you, you will miss me and you will probably cry, because you know that's what you do. BUT you won't need to because I will be in your heart and by your side. You have all these plans for your life but you keep saying you will do them when you grow up, you know what, and you are grown up so just bloody well do it! If you don't do everything you want to and live your life to the full I will actually haunt you, I swear to God I'm not kidding!

You have been the most amazing person in my life from the very first moment, don't tell mum or Josh but I love you the most! You are the best friend anyone could ever ask for, so you make sure you make lots of fab new friends and share your life with them. You have to promise me you will finish the list even the bits you don't want to, oh and next time it rains I want you to go outside and dance in the rain as if no one is watching you!

I love you more than I love myself and you know me, that's a lot!'

I'm so glad Izzy has talked continually not letting me get a word in edgeways as I don't think I could talk right now, other than to tell her the most important thing.

'I love you more than anything Izzy and I promise this isn't goodbye. But it is time for you to have some more meds and... And be... pain free. It's time to sleep now beautiful princess.'

I can't say this very well without sobbing.

'Ok Livs, I think I'm ready to go to sleep now. Oh but one last thing, as you love me, will you see if Karl Pilkington will come to my funeral? I think he'd make for wonderful entertainment.'

She's amazing! Just like that she has lightened the mood and made me want to laugh rather than cry!

'Isabella!! It's not meant to be entertaining; it's your bloody funeral! I will put on the last episode though, so be quiet and let's watch it.'

##  Chapter Nineteen

Bruno Mars - Just the way you are suddenly floats over the speakers and as soon as I hear it I almost break down. The words are so apt for Isabella, she really was amazing just the way she was.

The crematorium has filled up quickly. I'm standing right at the front with Josh and Rita to my left, and Ollie to my right. I know the start of the song means they're about to bring her down the aisle, but I can't bring myself to turn and look.

My eyes are shut but at that moment both Josh and Ollie grab my hands, so I know her coffin must be beside us.

'Livs open your eyes' Ollie murmurs.

I open my eyes and see a shiny, white coffin topped with bright, colourful flowers and a framed version of the photo of Isabella on the beach.

The last two weeks have been the hardest of my life. First I had to watch Isabella say her goodbyes. I knew she was close to the end, but I was in denial right up until the night of her death. I was hoping she'd go to sleep and wake up better. But instead, after watching An Idiot Abroad with me, she fell asleep in my arms for the very last time. I couldn't bring myself to leave her so I shouted for the others to come upstairs.

I've never heard a scream as crazed as the one I heard at 3.10am. I thought it was Rita breaking down at the death of her only child, but then Ollie came running in and carried me out of the room. The sound of the scream followed us, and I realised it was coming from me. I was making this haunting noise, whilst Josh and Rita just stood in silence.

The rest of the night and the next day were a blur as all the different people came and left. I barely noticed when they took her away, but then I saw Rita and how pale and exhausted she was. Something about her sad smile made me snap out of it. She's trying her best to be brave and be a mother figure to me, like she always has, but her hurt was too strong for a genuine smile. For once she needed me, I promised Isabella I'd help her mum sort everything. I wrote down her final wishes, her plans. She didn't want to upset her mum with these details prematurely, so I was the one she told. She said she wanted a white coffin, bright pink flowers and Bruno Mars. She didn't want any friends or family to carry her down the aisle because she wanted them to be a part of the "show", as she called it, and not be a part of it. She wanted her wake to be in the pub where she had her first alcoholic drink. She didn't want anyone wearing black and she didn't want anybody to be sad.

This was to be a celebration of life, not a sad occasion.

I helped plan the whole funeral, so I know without looking that When Leaving on a Jet Plane by John Denver comes on, it means the coffin is about to head behind the curtain; ready for my beautiful, kind, caring best friend to be turned to ashes.

I'm pretty sure this song is about a person cheating on their partner and promise they won't do it again. But Josh was insistent we use this song, apparently he used to sing it to Isabella when he was heading back to America.

My tears have stopped; instead I'm left feeling numb. The service was beautiful and exactly how Isabella would have wanted it. There were readings from one of our friends from school, and Ollie did a reading which Josh and I wrote together but couldn't bring ourselves to read it without crying. Rita was really strong throughout the whole service, I'm so proud of her.

'I want my mum!'

Ollie looks shocked by my sudden request after I've been silent the whole time.

'We'll see your mum at the pub, right now there are hundreds of people milling about. Look how popular she was. I don't think I know this many people at my age, let alone when I was 21.'

'We're only a couple of weeks away from turning 22. Izzy will never get to see 22. She will never get to see 32 or 50 or 100... All these people will forget her soon. They're only here because she was young when she died.'

'Olivia, please don't talk like that today. I know how upset you are, but it's not fair on Isabella's family, imagine if they heard you say that. Let's just go to the pub and find your mum shall we?'

I shrug my shoulders and lead the way to the car as my answer. He's right and I know it, but this whole thing is just so unfair.

My bad mood and depression subsides as soon as we get to the pub. Rita and I dropped off all the decorations last night ready for them to put up while we were at the service. They've done a fantastic job, far better than I ever could have.

The walls are covered in photos of Isabella, from her as a tiny baby to the most recent ones of her travelling the world. In every single photo her radiant smile fills the room. Although we've just said goodbye to her, it feels like Isabella is here with us.

'How are you coping darling?'

'Mum! Where have you been?'

'Sorry sweetheart, I've been helping Rita with the family bits. Things like: making sure Aunt Judy has a drink, ensuring Greg and his family aren't being left out or causing problems, accepting condolences from Uncle Ken. Those sorts of things... You have Ollie to love and support you, but Rita's now alone, like me.'

I hug my mum tightly as the tears start again. Now I'm crying for my mum as much as for myself. She had to do all of this when my dad was taken too young, and now Isabella's gone who was like a daughter to her; it must have brought back the memories.

If Isabella were here right now, she'd say our mums need love in their life. Once things have gone as close to normal as possible, considering, I'll put both our mums on dating websites. For Isabella, I will find them both love.

##  Chapter Twenty

'Are you sure about this Josh? It's not too late to change your mind; I asked them, they have spaces on our flight.'

'Thanks for the offer but it's too soon for me to go travelling and enjoying myself, especially with it being Isabella's birthday. I think I'm better off back at home with my family. I meant what I said to Isabella's family, they're welcome to visit anytime they like.'

'Okay Josh, if you're sure. Remember we love you and are here for you anytime you need us.'

Ollie nods his agreement and gives his friend a back slap and a heartfelt nod. Men communicate feelings in the weirdest ways.

'Thanks guys, now go catch your flight so I can sit in the bar until they call mine.'

'Josh please don't drink too much, they won't let you on the plane.'

'Yeah, yeah, alright mum.'

Josh reaches over to kiss my cheek, and then pulls me and Ollie into a three way hug. He's trying to so hard to be himself, but it's clear to see his heart is breaking.

Ollie booked this trip whilst I was organising Isabella's funeral. Apparently just before she died she pulled him to one side, and told him the plan was to visit the Pyramids for our birthday. She'd told Ollie that she wouldn't make it. Even if she was still alive, she knew she'd be too poorly to travel, so it was up to Ollie to make this the best birthday ever. Ollie hadn't booked our holiday while Isabella was still alive because he knew I wouldn't go away and leave Isabella on our last birthday together. He was right of course.

I didn't want to go this time but when I thought about spending my birthday at home with all our friends and family but without Isabella, I knew it'd be impossible. So at least if I'm somewhere new and beautiful, I may be slightly distracted.

Ollie's been fantastic since Isabella was told she had hours left. He kept me and Josh strong, fed us, cared for us and kept us smiling – for Izzy. After her death he kept looking after us and keeping us strong. It must have been so awful for him, he lost his friend too. But because the effect of her loss was worse for his girlfriend and best friend; he had to stay strong and not grieve.

Ollie was trying to take my mind off the flight when I started to panic last night, and he found the best way. We spent the evening setting mine and Isabella's mum up on a couple of dating websites, registering their details and posting our favourite photos of them. I don't think I'll be living in England for much longer, so I need to know my mum is happy and looked after. I promised Izzy I'd do the same for Rita.

Ollie and I chose our favourite men that were suggested and wrote both mums a list of men to contact, along with instructions on how to use the sites. That was our leaving gift before we ran to the car. My mum text me after about 80 minutes to say although they were offended, they'd give it a go for me and Isabella.

'Happy birthday kitten, are you ready to start celebrating?!'

'Err, what time is it? It's still dark!'

I try to keep my eyes open, but can only manage a few blinks before I try to go back to sleep.

'It's a little early but I wanted to wish you a happy birthday. Maybe we could go for a romantic walk before breakfast?'

I'm suddenly wide awake, this must be a dream! This is what happened last year!

'Did Izzy tell you to do this?'

'What? Izzy? Why would she tell me to wake you up?'

'Please tell me the truth. Is she playing some sort of beyond the grave joke?'

'I'm sorry I woke you. Maybe we should go back to sleep for a bit. You're really not a morning person are you?'

'No Ollie, I'm really not. But I'm ready to learn how to be, so let's get up.'

'Great, come on then. Dress warm; you know what happened on the hot air balloon ride!'

'Yeah, yeah, alright, do you want to choose my outfit and bring it to me?'

'What about your birthday suit? Now come here and let me give you your present.'

When Isabella died, one of the things she left me was her silver charm bracelet. For my birthday Ollie gave me a little silver penguin to put on there as it reminded him of my last birthday when he'd just met me. He also gave me the most beautiful, emerald green heart which was from Isabella. I loved the beautiful, green heart from the second I saw it. But when Ollie explained the reason he was up so early was because reception had called to say it'd finally been delivered, and why it had to be delivered; it was impossible not to cry and not to love it.

When Isabella knew she didn't have long left, she began looking online for things to do with her ashes, and came across a company that turns your ashes into glass. She left Ollie in charge of "stealing" some of her ashes to send off and have my heart, a necklace for her mum and a glass paperweight for Josh made.

I have no idea how Ollie got the ashes without any of us noticing and I don't want to ask. Ollie did assure me that there are still some left for me to scatter, as per Isabella's wish. So on Isabella's first missed birthday, me, Josh and Rita all got one last present from her.

My birthday present from Isabella was topped by a different emerald, which came in the form of a gold band with diamonds surrounding it.

We were at the pyramids catching some sun and having a break from our tour, when Ollie said he had another birthday present for me. He got up from the bench we were sitting on, and got down on one knee. I thought he was joking, until he produced the stunning ring that's now sitting comfortably on my left ring finger.

It was magical, and to have the Pyramids in the background made the whole thing perfect. Obviously I said yes! It was a hard day knowing Isabella wasn't here, but Ollie made it perfect.

##  Chapter Twenty One

'I hate to say it Kitten, but I think it's time to get back to reality. Now that I'm not writing about Isabella I don't really have an excuse to travel about. I need to go back to work, especially if I want to get this promotion.'

'I was thinking the same thing actually. You have a job to get to and I need to decide where I'm going to live and what I want to do with the rest of my life.'

'Where you're going to live? You're going to live with me, aren't you?'

'Well... umm... of course I want to. But I think I need to decide what career I want, and then choose where to live based on that. If I want to work in a nature reserve then obviously I can't live somewhere that doesn't have one nearby.'

'Okay, I guess that makes sense. Well hurry up and decide what you want to do and let me know, so I can figure out moving and starting my own newspaper.'

'You'd give up your job and house for me?'

'Of course I would kitten! Now can we please join the mile high club?'

I'd love to move in with Ollie straight away. I have enough money left over from my scratch cards and savings so I wouldn't have to work straight away. I need to get my life sorted though; I've gone straight from education to temping to travelling. I know if Isabella hadn't been ill I'd be working now, but in a way I'm pleased for the excuse to travel and grow up a bit. We're back in England for a couple of days before we head off to Canada for our trip, before its back to reality. I promised Isabella I'd scatter her ashes abroad somewhere I loved and where she hadn't been before. So if I can persuade Rita to let me take her with me, I'm hoping to scatter her in Calgary.

My dad used to fish in Calgary for one month of the year every summer. My mum would join him for a week or two and shop or relax whilst he fished during the day, and then in the evenings they'd go out and do something romantic. When my dad was killed, my mum wanted to travel to Calgary to scatter his ashes on his favourite part of the river he fished, but she couldn't bring herself to travel there without him. My plan is to take Isabella's ashes along with something of my dad's to scatter together. I hope my dad is looking after her up there.

Once I've done this, I think I'll be ready to finally settle down and live my life how I want to. As much as I love Isabella, I think I had her so high on a pedestal that I've spent my life trying to live up to the standards I felt she set. Between that and constantly worrying about my mum being sad, lonely or missing my dad, I kind of put my life on standby. This has changed now because my mum is now dating! While Ollie was proposing to me, my mum was on her first date in longer than she cares to admit. And it's all thanks to me as it was someone she met on the dating site I set her up on. Rita hasn't started dating yet as she's still grieving, but mum and I will help her when the time is right. I did promise Isabella after all.

##  Chapter Twenty Two

'Do you think he'll be there?'

'I hope so Livs, he texted me to say his flight was landing before ours, so he'd wait around for us.'

'That's not what I mean Ollie...'

'Yeah I know what you meant. He said he'd meet us there and I believe him. He's not really been out or done anything since he went home. Even his mum called me as she was worried about him.'

'I know, and it upsets me, he was so outgoing. This is the last thing Isabella would have wanted, we have to help him.'

'JOSH!'

Josh looks shocked when he hears Ollie and I both shout his name as we run at him, arms open.

'Alright guys? I hear congratulations are in order?'

Josh sounds happy as we have a three way hug, but I sense the sadness in his voice. We must bring back memories of his and Isabella's engagement.

'Thanks dude! How are you? You look well.'

'Yeah yeah, I'm fine. Is... is she with you?'

Josh turns to face me when he asks the last bit. I reach out and take Josh's hand.

'Yes Hun, she is. I guess this is the last time all four of us will be travelling together.'

'I've missed her so much. I don't know if scattering her ashes will help bring me closure, or make me miss her more.'

'I know what you mean. I don't want to let her go, but I know I'm giving her to my dad to protect. And I have my emerald to protect keep her with me always.'

'I know this is what she wanted, but it doesn't make it any easier. It's too soon, I'm not ready.'

I can hear the sorrow in Josh's voice before I see the tears trickling down his cheeks. I pull him in for a hug while Ollie looks away slightly awkwardly.

'I was going to choose you.'

I almost didn't hear him whisper this into my hair, but as the realisation hits me I pull away.

'What?'

Josh looks shy suddenly and I think I must have been hearing things, but then he gives me a coy smile.

'That first day in the restaurant, I wanted to choose you but knew you'd be perfect for Ollie. So when Isabella threw herself at me, I thought she'd be a bit of fun for a few days.'

'What?'

'Yeah, thank god for Ollie eh? Can you imagine us together?'

'What?'

'Livs, please say something other than what. I loved her, I didn't think I would but I did, with all my heart!'

'Me? You wanted me over Isabella?'

'I did, but don't worry, you're safe with Ollie now... so let's get going shall we?'

'Oh...Kay...'

'Oh, and maybe let's not tell Ollie, he might get all weird and jealous.'

'Sure, let's go find Ollie and head off to the hotel.'

I hadn't noticed Ollie wander off; I pray to god he hasn't left because he heard Josh's confession.

We found Ollie in the airport shop buying sweets for the drive to our hotel. He hadn't heard a word, just thought he'd give us some time to talk.

Along with Isabella's ashes, we brought along some photos of her, and some photos of my dad. We cut them into strips and made them into origami wishing stars so they could go together. When we eventually scattered them, we all sobbed. I played "Swallowed by the Sea" by Coldplay on my phone with the volume on maximum. The words hit me like tonne of bricks. Replace the word sea with river, and that's exactly how I feel.

'Welcome to your new home kitten!'

'Welcome to our new home!'

It was bloody hard to get my visa, even with Ollie's paper sponsoring me. Never mind the fact I'm engaged to an American and have been offered a job at Sea World which I'm currently counting down the hours until I start.

It's now August 3rd and I'm finally here, standing in the house Ollie and I have just bought together across the road from Josh.

'I'm so pleased to be home and close to my boys!'

'And I'm ecstatic to have you here finally! Now go and grab Josh, I have a gift for you both.'

When Josh joins me in our posh new lounge that still smells like new carpet and fresh paint, Ollie pulls out two beautifully wrapped parcels, identical in size.

Josh and I rip into the paper and find ourselves staring at a book with Isabella's smiling face on the front. The cover reads: Isabella – Her story as told by Oliver Clarke.

He wrote a book! The man I love has written a book about the girl I love! She always wanted to be a heroine in her own book, so now even after death she can cross off number 3.

So that completes Isabella's last request.

Other books by Laura Lawrence available on Kindle -

Isabella's Last Gift

The Best Friend, Boyfriend Theory

The Best Friend, Husband Theory

It's All About You

#  The Best Friend, Boyfriend Theory

#  CHAPTER ONE

My eyes brimming with tears, I quickly glance over to James and catch him cheekily smiling at me. Turning to smile back at him, I can't help but giggle at the look of distain on his handsome face. His large warm hand reaches out and grabs hold of mine, it instantly comforts me; I don't want him to let go.

'Becky?' He leans into me and stage whispers. 'It's only a film. Must you embarrass me by crying every time we go to the cinema?'

I'm about to protest when he continues his little friendly rant, much to the annoyance of the rest of the audience.

'It's bad enough being dragged to chick flicks every time without you blubbering. Next time I'm choosing what we watch. No more of this shite.'

I hear people around us starting to grumble and shushing us so I decide not to argue at this stage, I'll wait until later. I simply snatch my hand back and cross my arms tightly across my chest in a true stroppy teenager fashion.

I continue watching the film, feeling the main character's pain as she falls in love with the wrong guy who treats her badly. I know she will end up moving on from him and having her happy ever after. I'm not crying because this is sad or because I feel anything for her character, I'm crying for me.

Sadly, unlike the fake blonde on the screen, I don't think I will get my happy ever after. I thought I had the perfect relationship with my ex Alex but we just grew apart, caused by him kicking me out of our flat and out of his life.

Before I have time to dwell on this I feel a warm hand on my knee causing my heart to skip a beat. For just a moment, I can't breathe, I'm entranced by his touch. I sneak a glance at James and his eyes are twinkling in the dull light of the cinema screen. He's so attractive; he always has been even when we were awkward teenagers. He's always just been James Jones or plain JJ to me. Whenever I've introduced him to new people, most of my friends have always had crushes on him. I'm used to most girls and even the occasional guy swooning when they first meet him, but it's never been me; I thought I was better than that.

This sounds awful but I honestly don't mean it like that. I like bad boys, and I know I'm not the only one. There are many girls before me, and there will be many more after. They're always the ones who break my heart and JJ is my rock, the one who picks me up when my life is in pieces and I'm a crumpled mess on the floor. Back in the cinema, JJ pulls me from my thoughts as he squeezes and releases my knee like it's his very own stress ball. My temperature is rising and my face is beginning to flush, I thank god that it's dark in here so he won't notice. He's oblivious anyway secretly engrossed in the film, Oh and I was right by the way she has already moved on and is starting her new and better life. I can't bare it and I'm sure he can feel the heat pulsing through me. I pull my leg away and cross them, forcing JJ's hand to flop down and away from me.

I have been trying to fight these odd feelings towards JJ for a couple of weeks now. I still don't really understand them. I couldn't possibly fancy James Jones. He has a girlfriend for starters! I won't be one of those girls who takes other girls boyfriends, it's just not me! These feelings didn't happen overnight; they just sort of crept up on me without me realising. He was always slim, tall, and handsome with floppy long dirty blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. He's recently joined the gym and is drinking bulk up shakes and is developing these amazing muscular arms.

A couple of weeks ago, I was helping him choose an outfit for a date with his girlfriend, Julia, and I caught a glimpse of his toned six-pack. I couldn't help but notice even his hips seem to have become more toned. But it wasn't until he cut his long hair into a short choppy style; with just the right amount of wax to hold it in place that I felt something change. I didn't really think about it at the time but that night I had a very strange dream about him, strange as in it we were married with kids. If we had kids that means we must have had sex and until recently my rational mind couldn't compute this.

This dream marked the beginning of my infatuation with JJ and from that moment, he invaded my dreams more frequently. Some of them quite graphic, these are the ones that bring me out in a sweat when I wake. I have yet to decide if it's a good or bad sweat but I'm worried it could be a good one.

If I was to tell James all this he would be terrified. As I said, he's always had loads of girls after him; what I neglected to mention was unless one of the girls was marriage material by the third date then they wouldn't usually get to the fourth. This is perhaps why JJ has only had three serious girlfriends that have survived longer than a couple of weeks. To say that he has more sex than your average man whore makes me sound quite bitter and jealous. But he has a girl in his bed at least 5 times a week! But deep down, he has a heart of gold, and is a top class guy just desperate for the whole two point four children thing and he thinks shagging about will get him there. JJ is blissfully unaware that he is a babe magnet, so doesn't realise most of the poor girls fall in love with him after their first encounter and I don't have the heart or the decency to tell him otherwise.

Jolted back to right here, right now, I suddenly realise the credits are rolling and the lights are coming up. I must have missed the last twenty minutes of the film. I didn't even get to my favourite cinema daydream; James pulling me out of my seat, declaring his undying love for me, before picking me up and carrying me out of the cinema and into the back seat of his car. I know what you're thinking, a car, how common, how old is this girl? But in my defence at the cinema it's either the back row of seats or JJ's nice clean car. I've got to say unfortunately I'm a bit past the being pushed up against the toilet wall; after all I am twenty six and starting to feel every year of it. JJ is 25 and doesn't turn 26 until next month and I can't wait! He constantly jokes that I'm the old one while he is still a strapping young lad. I feel I should point out two errors with this sentence, one I'm only six months older than him and two no self-respecting twenty five almost twenty six year old refers to himself as a lad. Well not our generation anyway. I realise I have again zoned out and the cinema is almost completely empty. JJ is staring at me concerned. I blink and notice he's waving his hand in front of my glazed eyes. I snap out of it, give him an awkward half smile, snatch my jacket and bag from his grasp and walk past him.

'Becks ... Becky ... Oi Becks wait up. What's the rush?'

JJ jogs up to me reaching out to grab my shoulder, his hand meets my shoulder and I can hear my heart beating so loudly in my chest that I'm sure he can hear it too. He gives me a lopsided grin and pulls me closer to his warm body using my shoulders as leverage.

'Are you ok Becks? You've been acting real strange lately?'

Oh God! He's noticed, I have to snap out of it, I can't act differently around him anymore, I need to sort my crazy feelings out and get over this stupid blip. I smile up at him from under my eyelashes and tell him what he wants to hear, that I'm just fine, I give his arm a little rub as I say it and suddenly wonder if I'm attempting to flirt with him. He seems oblivious again pulling me towards him, flinging his arm around both my shoulders now leading me towards my car. I drove us here and promised to drop him at Julia's on the way home.

169

