 
### Saved by Grace

Copyright  2017 TJ Rudolph

Published by TJ Rudolph

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

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or portions thereof in any form whatsoever.

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Prologue

I paced my driveway impatiently, waiting for him to show. Glancing at my watch, I noticed that he was thirty minutes late. I pulled my phone out of my bag and tried to call him, but his phone went straight to voicemail.

Aaron Wheeler was my best friend, the only friend I've had for the past five years. We met when I was twelve-years-old and we had an instant connection. As we spent more time together, our friendship grew into something deeper, and I fell in love with him.

I didn't know much about love at that age, and my understandings went as deep as spending every waking moment with him. He friend-zoned me, dubbing me his baby sister, and I decided not to tell him how I felt.

He was everything I could ask for in a guy—my knight in shining armor. He saw me sitting alone in the school cafeteria, and rescued me from spending my teenage years alone. He was the only shoulder I had to cry on when my mom walked out on my dad and me. My dad would be away at sea for months at a time, and Aaron would always insist that I stay with their family while Dad was gone. He was an only child and his parents, Chris and Agatha, were all too happy to have me there.

Agatha said I was the daughter she never had and I loved his family like they were my own. His grandmother often joked about us getting married, but Aaron laughed it off and said that he would not get involved in incestuous activity.

I glanced anxiously at my watch again. Aaron was never late. In fact, he was painfully punctual and always reprimanded me for not being on time.

The phone buzzing in my blue jeans startled me. As soon as I tugged it from my pocket, I saw Agatha's name flashing on the screen.

"Hi, Agatha. Is everything okay?"

"Grace," she whispered hoarsely as if she had been crying. "I..." Her voice trailed off.

"Agatha?" I questioned loudly. "What is wrong?"

She didn't respond.

I heard shuffling, like the sound of the receiver changing hands, and then Chris's voice.

"Grace," he murmured weakly. "Aaron has been in a car accident... We're... We're at the hospital..." His voice tapered off and I started feeling sick to my stomach.

"Is he okay?!" I shouted this time.

"He... The doctors... They wanted to switch off the life support, but we asked them to wait, so that you can say goodbye."

"Life support? Goodbye? What are you talking about Chris?" I felt my body shaking.

He ignored my question and continued speaking. "I asked Kay from next door to pick you up."

My phone dropped to the ground and my hands trembled. It felt like hours passed me in that moment and I couldn't move.

I snapped out of my stupor. Did Chris say someone was fetching me? I couldn't recall the last part of the conversation. I felt like I wanted to throw up, but I needed to get to Aaron. He needed me. I moved my feet forward until I was running to the garage to get my bicycle. I climbed on it and started pedaling. The hospital was not that far, but my wobbly legs made it seem a lot further.

Tears blinded me as the news sunk in. "It can't be... It can't be...It can't be," I chanted, trying to make that true.

When I arrived at the hospital, I threw my bike to the ground and ran inside, frantically looking around for the emergency room. Finally, I found the red sign that pointed me in the right direction and I sprinted to the reception area.

"I need to see Aaron Wheeler," I shouted desperately to the lady at the front desk.

"Are you family?" she questioned, and I noticed the sympathy behind her eyes.

"It's okay," Chris said as he came up behind me. "She's with us."

"Where is he, Chris?" I asked anxiously. "I need to see him."

"Down the passage, follow me."

He was walking too slow; I needed to get to Aaron right away but I was afraid of what I was going to see. I walked slower as my heart started pounding in my chest. This felt like a nightmare, and I prayed that I was going to wake up soon. I pinched myself just to make sure it wasn't a dream but I didn't feel it—not because this was a dream, but because my entire body was numb.

The short distance between the reception area and Aaron's room felt like it was miles away, and when we finally got to his room, I couldn't bring myself to step inside. I slumped into a chair and the tears flowed. Chris picked me up and held me while I cried, although I could see that he was barely keeping it together himself.

"You have to say goodbye, Grace."

I try to nod at him but my head didn't move and my attempt to pull myself together was failing. When I walked into the room I tried to look at everything but what was in front of me, and I stared at the bare white walls. I slowly shifted my eyes to the bed that Aaron was on and I whimpered as I saw the bandages on his body. Everything was covered, even his head and legs. He was connected to tubes and machines and I almost didn't recognize him. Agatha was standing next to him, weeping.

I walked slowly toward him and took his hand in mine.

Chris led Agatha out of the room and whispered. "Give her a moment alone with him."

I tried to say something but nothing but sobs came out. I needed to speak to him, so I took a deep breath and tried again. "Aaron, you can't do this to me. Don't leave me." I put my head on his chest and took in his musky scent.

"Aaron, I have been meaning to tell you something," I whispered to him, sniffling in tears that dropped from the tip of my nose.

I knew that he couldn't hear me, and my heart was filled with regret that I never told him. I ran my hand down his muscular arm and remembered the way he used to hold me when I was cold. I would never see the deep dimple that appeared on his left cheek when he smiled after he saw one of the drawings I did of him; or hear him grunt when he laughed. The only time of my life when I ever felt safe was when I looked into his honest blue eyes, there were never any secrets between us and I would never have that with anyone again. The one thing I did keep from him was to protect our friendship, but now I need him to know and I want to tell him as if he is standing right in front of me. Looking at me with his vibrant blue eyes.

"Aaron, I want you to know that I love you. I will always love you..." My voice faltered and I tried to clear my throat. "Not like a sister. You are the love of my life. You always will be," I said as I stroked his face.

I heard a voice by the doorway. "I'm sorry," a male voice said. "But it's time."

I looked up and through blurred vision, I stared at the three figures in front of me. The one figure wore a white coat, and suddenly the nightmare became a reality. In that moment, I feared that I didn't have the strength to let go, not yet. I didn't think I ever wanted to let go! After a few moments, Agatha and Chris joined me at the bed.

The doctor walked over to the machine that was keeping my best friend alive and as he lifted his hand, I stopped him.

"Please, wait!" I cried.

Leaning in, I kissed Aaron's bruised lips and I let mine linger there for a moment. "I love you, Aaron," I murmured against his mouth. "I'm sorry," I whispered to Chris and Agatha as I straightened and walked away. I couldn't watch as they killed him.

The last thing I heard as I walked down the deserted hospital wing, with tears streaming down my face, was the sound of the life support flat lining and the shrill scream that came from Agatha. It echoed through the entire wing, a haunting sound that would stay with me forever.

I wanted to run as far away from the hospital as possible, but my legs felt like lead beneath me. I made it to the exit and fell to my knees, letting out a piercing cry as I felt my heart dying with him.
Chapter 1

I lay still on my bed as I looked out the window. I knew my life would never be the same again. In fact, I was sure that it was over.

It had been three days since they lowered Aaron's body to the ground and I still had flashes of him in a silver casket. He looked like he had fallen asleep in his favorite blue suit, like he would open his eyes at any moment.

I tried to erase the image from my mind and concentrated on the long grass fanning in the wind. I thought of all the times Aaron chased me through that grass and then we would fall down and laugh until my head hurt.

I had no more tears left in me, but there was an ache deep inside my chest that never went away.

"Grace? Are you okay, honey?" My dad's voice echoed from the other side of the door.

I didn't answer; I was afraid that if I moved from my bed I would lose any shred of sanity I still had.

I heard the door creak open. "Grace, is everything okay?" he repeated.

"Yes," was all I managed to croak. I couldn't bring myself to tear my gaze from the trees outside the wood framed window.

There was silence for a moment. I knew he was lingering, trying to find the right words, although he knew there were none. The door clicked shut and there was Aaron again, chasing me through the tall wafting grass.

My dad came home for the funeral and announced that he would be staying at home for a few weeks. I was grateful for him because I knew we couldn't afford for him to be at home for so long. Even though I never left my room, I needed him more than I thought I would. My heartache was mounting by the minute, and I hadn't had a proper night's rest in weeks. Dad forced me to go see the town's psychologist, Doctor Parker, who recently moved here from New York and that had my nightmare's subsiding.

I shifted my eyes to the opened envelope on my desk and its crumbled contents scattered alongside it.

I had received acceptance letters from three colleges, and the last thing I wanted was to go to any of them. Aaron and I spent the last two years planning where we wanted to go. I remembered the day as if it were yesterday; we were sitting on his bed talking about what we wanted to do after high school.

"I'm not so sure if I should pursue this, Aaron, I mean, can people really make money or am I going to spend my years being a struggling artist?"

"Come here," he said, pulling me off his bed. He opened his cupboard door, and stuck on the inside was a drawing I had done of him when I was thirteen; one where he was pushing me on a swing.

"Lots of people can draw, Aaron, it's not rocket science."

"Nobody I know can draw like that at thirteen, Gracy."

"I suppose if I am really struggling, I can always get Doctor Aaron Wheeler to lend me some cash," I joked.

He smiled but there was a seriousness in his eyes. "I will always be there for you, Gracy, no matter what."

"Well, you're not here now, are you?" I choked, as the tears I thought had dried up started rolling again.

I thought about how Aaron and I spent nights with our heads glued to the computer as we looked for a college in all fifty states that specialized in both art and medicine. We eventually found a great one, Winchester Roth College, which was only a four hour drive away from home.

None of the three letters I received, however, were from WRC. I had applied for a scholarship since I didn't have enough money to pay for tuition myself. I thought that maybe my application got lost in the mail, but three days before the funeral, it finally arrived.

I found the white envelope on my front porch with WRC stamped on it. It was sticking out of the wooden box I had painted, which had the word mail written on it.

I still didn't have the courage to open it. What if I got in? What if I didn't? It seemed so unfair to live life without him.

Doctor Parker told me that if I made every decision based on the fact that I didn't want to do it without Aaron, I would end up doing nothing with my life, and judging by what I told her about him, she knew that was not what he would want for me. She was right; if Aaron were here, he would have told me to live my life.

Maybe it was time to open the letter, maybe knowing would make my miserable life different somehow. Before I had the chance to reason any further, I was standing in front of the cupboard where I stashed the letter. My hands trembled as I reached for it and I took a minute before I opened it. The first words my eyes fell on were, _Congratulations, you have been accepted._

I stopped reading and held the letter against my chest. I felt worse than before. I got into the college I was supposed to go to with my best friend, my only friend.

Life was unfair. I spent most of my adolescent years alone, resigned to the fact that it would always be that way because people were cruel, and then Aaron came along. He was different and he showed me that no matter where I came from, I was worthy of love. Before I closed the cupboard door, I saw Aaron's gray jersey inside. I pulled it out and slipped my arms through it. I brought the collar up to my nose and inhaled a deep breath; it still had his musky scent in it. I loved this jersey. Aaron used to get it for me whenever I was cold, but now I was drowning in it. I turned to look at myself in the long mirror next to the window; I hadn't eaten in days. The only thing I could hold down was liquids.

I walked out of my room to get a glass of water, and as I stood in the kitchen, I looked at the rustic brick walls. There was a time when I loved running my hands along the rough bricks as I passed, but now it only reminded me of a time when Aaron helped my dad cement it on the walls. I absentmindedly poured a glass of water and only realized that it was running over when the cold water hit my fingers. The phone hanging on the wall by the entrance of the kitchen started ringing, and I ignored it as I slowly slurped the water. On the third ring, my dad came rushing toward it. When he answered, he turned to look at me, but I turned my face toward the sink.

"Hello?" my father's voice sounded brittle.

I slipped past him with my head lowered and walked back to my room. I stopped in the doorway when I heard the rest of the conversation. "Oh. Hi, Chris, Grace is doing...well I'm not really sure to be honest." I quickly went into my room and shut the door. I couldn't stand to hear the hopeless tone in my Dad's voice.

I hadn't seen much of Chris and Agatha after the funeral. We had all fallen into a dark pit since he was gone and couldn't find the words or strength to help each other out of it. That was the first time they called. I heard the muffled sound outside my door which went on for a long time but my mind was too far away to pay attention to what my dad was saying.

A few minutes later, there was a knock at my door again. I turned away from the door and pulled the bed sheet over my head. I knew that my dad wanted to help but I wasn't in the mood for conversation. He didn't walk in this time when I didn't answer.

"Chris invited us over for supper tonight. We're leaving at seven," he called through the door.

I didn't want to go back to his house, not yet, but I knew my dad was not going to take no for an answer. He didn't usually force me to do things, but he would probably tell me that getting out would be good for me.

I continued looking at the tall blades of grass; I stared at them for hours as if it were a lifeline, a link to Aaron I didn't want to break.

I dragged myself out of bed just before seven and slipped on a pair of blue jeans and a gray t-shirt. I looked in the mirror and noticed that the bags under my eyes were worse than last week; it made my light green eyes appear darker than they actually were. I pulled my wavy auburn hair into a bun; it had grown past my shoulders, which was much longer than I liked it. My clothing, which used to fit me snugly, was now hanging off of my body. I took a belt out of the drawer next to my bed and looped it through my jeans. I walked toward the door and looked back at my room.

Aaron always teased me for being a neat freak. He would be shocked to see how messy my room looked now. The dark purple quilt on my double bed had not been washed in weeks and it was untidily tucked under my mattress. The long brown cupboard against the wall was open and I could see pieces of clothing hanging from the shelves. I sighed as I stepped outside and closed the door behind me. Hauling my feet down the long passage toward the front door, I noticed as I passed the living room that it was almost in the same condition as my room. Dad did his best to clean up, but it was usually my job. I locked the front door and as I walked down the front steps I saw my dad already waiting in our faded red Toyota.

When I climbed into the car, I immediately got a whiff of lemon grass, which meant Dad spent the afternoon cleaning it. As I pulled the seatbelt across my body, he reached over and touched my hand. "You ready to go, honey?" He smiled even though he appeared tired and worried.

His usually sharp eyes were drooping and his face was full of stubble. I used to cut his hair every time he came home from the ship, but he never asked me to this time and it looked like he had done it himself because his light brown hair was ashy and unevenly cut.

I tried to smile back at him but my heart was just not in it, so I heaved a sigh and nodded.

Aaron lived only ten minutes away from my house but than ten minutes divided our town into two classes. The one where I lived was where you would find the run down two bedroom homes packed closely together, and outside the grass was usually a faded brown color, except for the grass outside my window close to the lake. Our house, however, was a slightly bigger three bedroom home and faced the small lake, with no neighbors on either side. Dad said he was lucky to buy it and he got a good price for it; it was the only house of its kind in our area.

Aaron's house on the other hand, was very different; it was a large white two-story home with a double garage and the greenest grass I had ever seen. It had four bedrooms with a bathroom in each one. He had a blue, diamond shaped pool in his yard, which we could actually swim in, unlike the murky brown lake alongside our home. Aaron and I often joked that there were probably crocodiles living in it, and I once dared him to jump in. I was horrified when he actually did it and even more so when he took a few seconds to come up. I frantically called out to him until he materialized from the murky water twenty agonizing seconds later.

We pulled up at Agatha and Chris's house; the familiar façade pulled me from my memories.

We climbed out and walked through the white swinging wooden gate, down a long pathway up a set of stairs. My dad walked up to the front door with a bottle of wine tucked under his arm. For some reason, he seemed nervous, which was weird, but I didn't pay much attention to it. He cleared his throat before knocking on the door and I was wringing my hands together.

The white door swung open and Agatha smiled when she saw me. She looked older than I remembered, but still beautiful. Her blonde hair was cut short, which made her brown eyes look rounder, although they were red and puffy.

"Grace, baby, I am so happy to see you, it's been too long."

I put my arms around her and realized that she must have lost about twenty pounds since I last saw her, but then again, the same could be said for me.

Chris towered over both of us and gave me a bear hug. "I missed you, Pumpkin," he said as he planted a kiss on top of my head. He looked like an older version of Aaron, with his naturally broad shoulders and tall frame. His blue eyes, which Aaron also inherited from him, had dark rings under them too. I felt sad knowing that like me, they were probably haunted by the same nightmares of Aaron dying.

"Nice to see you again, Joel," Chris said, shaking my dad's hand.

"Yes, yes, thanks for inviting us."

"Dinner is ready," Agatha said, and we walked behind her on a red carpet. The familiarity of the house gave me an immediate lump in my throat. The dimly lit hallway was narrow and had photos on either side of the walls; I tried not to look at the ones of Aaron as I passed, but right next to the wooden staircase was my favorite one of him and I. His blond hair stood out against the white background and I quickly wiped my tears away. When I entered into the kitchen through the slated white doors, the table was bedecked with food.

"Grace, I made your favorite." Agatha smiled. "Chicken lasagna."

"Thank you." I smiled back weakly. I sat down at the round wooden table and held my stomach as Agatha placed a plate with food in front of me; this would be my first attempt at 'real' food.

The conversation was strained, a gloomy uneasiness filling the room. Agatha looked like only her body was there with us—from time to time she would shift her eyes to the blank wall and Chris would have to call her names a few times before she responded. Chris tried to keep me involved in the conversation by asking if I wanted more food, to which I politely refused.

When we were done eating, there was a long period of silence at the table, until my father broke it. "Thank you, Agatha, that was amazing, and you even got Grace to eat."

"I am glad you enjoyed it," she responded with a small smile.

My father cleared his throat; the nervousness I noticed earlier was resurfacing.

"There is another reason we came here tonight, Grace," my father said, looking down at his plate. "You know that I really want to stay at home with you, but we just can't afford it and I need to leave next week. I don't want you to be alone in the house, so I've asked Chris and Agatha if you could stay with them, until you go to college next year. How would you feel about that?"

I remained quiet, moving the chicken around on my plate. How I felt about it was that everyone had already made a decision for me and I knew I didn't have much choice in the matter.

Agatha reached over and touched my hand. "I'm sorry we didn't speak to you first, honey, but you cannot be by yourself." She knew me too well, as well as any mother knew her daughter. "You already have a room here, so it would just be a matter of you bringing some clothes over."

I nodded once. "Sure, that's fine."

I could see everyone in the room relax, as if they were expecting more of a fight.

Agatha stood up and took something out of the oven. "Chris made apple pie," she said and brought it to the table.

"I can't promise that it's any good," Chris joked, but no one, not even he, laughed.

Agatha forced me to try some of the dessert, and after I had, I was ready to leave. "Thank you both for inviting us over." I glanced between Agatha and Chris. "Dad, if you're ready, I would like to go home now, I'm feeling tired."

"It was a pleasure, honey," Agatha said, stroking my arm. "We're looking forward to you staying with us."

"Me too." I pulled my lips into a smile.

My dad stayed behind for a few minutes after I walked to the car, no doubt making more decisions without discussing it with me first.

I wasn't angry, really; I wasn't in the right frame of mind to make rash decisions. I knew they only wanted what was best for me, but the thought of being in Aaron's house without him was going to be painful.

I sat in the car and looked at them through the window. My Dad had that concerned look on his face, the one he permanently wore since the accident. Chris stayed true to his strong nature putting on a brave face, but Agatha looked the way I felt, hopeless and detached from reality. I knew every day I spent there would remind them of a child they no longer had, one they had to replace with another.

That's when I made the decision, right then and there. In a few months' time, I would go to college. Perhaps then it would be easier for everyone, me included.
Chapter 2

Aaron's scent still hung in the air. Being at his house was not as agonizing as I thought, in fact it was somewhat calming. It made me feel like he was still there with me. Every room had a hundred different memories and it comforted me. Agatha gave me the downstairs bedroom with a view of the pool. It used to be a storage room but Agatha had Chris clear it out. According to her the room I used to sleep in when I stayed over was too small for everyday living.

She kept Aaron's door closed permanently and I never saw her go into it. I didn't blame her; I couldn't bring myself to go into his room either. The guestroom was much bigger than my own bedroom, and it had a double bed with high ceilings. There was a thick white duvet on the bed, like the ones they normally have at hotels, and matching white curtains with lace detail. It was quite the contrast to my home. The floor was carpeted with a plush gray rug and a large brown, antique-looking cupboard stood against a wall opposite my bed.

Early one Saturday morning, as I lay looking up at the celling, I heard the heavy brown cupboards in the foyer being pulled along the oak floor. Agatha had started her obsessive cleaning regime. I assumed it was a coping mechanism to get her mind off Aaron. We all had one—Chris spend as much time away from home as possible and mine was endlessly staring at things that reminded me of him. I decided to get up and walked out by the door.

"Need some help?" I asked.

She barely acknowledged me and shook her head. She had brown sweatpants on and was kneeling on the floor with a cloth in her hand.

"I've got it. Chris will be home at twelve, you can come down to eat then."

I tried to make eye contact with her to let her know that I was there, that she wasn't going through this alone, but she purposefully ignored me as she concentrated on polishing the floor.

I sighed as I walked back to my room and thought that maybe I should give her Doctor Parker's number.

Around midday, I walked to the kitchen and found Agatha already in it. She made a big lunch nobody would finish and I stood still as I stared at it all.

Agatha turned around and noticed my shocked face. "I'm just so used to... whenever Aaron came home from practice..." She turned away and started washing the dishes.

I wanted to walk up to her, put my hand on her shoulder and tell her that we were going to be okay. I even spent a few seconds picturing it, but I knew that was a lie; none of us would ever be the same again. So instead I sat down at the table and placed a piece of chicken on my plate.

I heard the front door opening and Chris walked inside; he tried to be chirpy as he entered the kitchen and I wondered how he always managed to put on a brave face. I would say that out of the three of us he was handling the situation the best, but then I would look into his swollen, red eyes and know that was not the case.

"It smells wonderful in here," he said, walking over to Agatha and kissing her cheek. He turned to me. "Hey, Pumpkin."

I tried to smile at him as I stabbed at the chicken on my plate.

Lunch was a quiet affair and a few hours later when we gathered to eat dinner, it was exactly the same. We had fallen into a routine almost fit for recluses.

We passed a few words amongst each other and then we all said goodnight and retired to our rooms. The house I once loved to be at had become dismal and I feared that it would stay like that forever.

School on the other hand was a lot harder. I floated in and out of class and everything seemed to go by in one hazy mass.

As I was walking to art class one morning, I felt a hand on my arm and slowly turned around; I was not in the mood for the small talk everyone was trying to make lately.

I stared up into the brown eyes of John, or John-o, as Aaron affectionately called him.

"Hey, how you doing?" he spoke up gently.

I didn't answer him and stared down and my feet.

"Right, sorry... stupid question. Look, I just wanted... If you ever need anyone to talk to, I know Aaron was your only friend around here. I mean he often spoke about you."

"Thanks." I shrugged, wondering why Aaron would speak to his basketball buddies about me.

"There are a lot of people who really miss him too, Grace," he whispered and then walked off.

I stood in the hallway a few minutes after the bell rang. Aaron was not only our school's basketball legend, he had a nurturing way with people and everyone loved him. John-o was right; I knew they all felt the loss.

Every weekend there was a party, and Aaron usually only went to a few of them, but now that he was gone, people started inviting me, which made me feel even lonelier.

I walked to the back of the class and sat next to a window. Miss Goliard, our art teacher, had put up blank canvases for everyone. I heard her saying something about doing an interpretation on dance and I picked up my paint brush. Forty-five minutes later, however, I had not painted a single thing on the canvas and was glad that Miss Goliard wasn't walking around. The bell rang and I picked up my bag, making a beeline for the door.

"Grace? Could I see you for a moment?" Miss Goliard tucked her disheveled hair behind her ears.

"What is it with everyone wanting to talk today?" I hissed under my breath.

I stood next to the brown table she was sitting at and she smiled up at me.

"Grace, I'm just going to cut to the chase. I don't want to pretend that I know what you're going through because I have no idea. That doesn't mean that I don't want what's best for you, and that it pains me to see you this way. You know I don't like to label my students, but you are the best art student I have ever had. You have a great gift, Grace, and I know it feels like it won't get easier, but it will.

I looked out of the window; I didn't want to discuss anything with her. I didn't have the strength.

"All I am saying, Grace, is that you have a bright future ahead of you, and I would hate to see it wasted."

"Is that all?" I asked tersely.

"I guess it is," she nodded.

I stormed out of her room, I was angry at her... angry at myself that she could be right and knowing that I was being unjust to Aaron's memory by throwing away my gift.

I tried to do better the rest of the year, tried to pick myself up out of the feeling of despair, but it was harder that I thought. Most days went by in a daze, and finals swept by. I wasn't sure how I passed. I wasn't exactly what you would call intellectually challenged, but I was pretty sure that my teachers were giving me higher grades than I deserved.

I skipped prom and stayed in for most of the summer holidays and before I knew it, Agatha was helping me pack my bags and dragging me shopping to buy new clothes for college. She took me to the most expensive shops and mostly chose all the clothes for me, things I would never be able to afford myself.

"I can't let you pay for all these things," I told her after we went to the third boutique.

"I know you like to be independent, Grace, but I want to do this for you, so please let me."

I nodded; I knew that her going shopping with me was taking her mind off things, and like me, she hadn't really left the house. Aaron told me that she used to be a teacher, but stopped working when he was born and his Dad had his own business, manufacturing his own line of advanced construction material. They were very wealthy, unlike my father who was left to raise me alone after my mother left years ago. They were humble people and taught Aaron to be the same, and he was. He was the sweetest guy I had ever met.

The night before I had to leave, she and Chris called me into the kitchen.

"I can't believe you're leaving tomorrow," Agatha said for the hundredth time while wiping away her tears. I felt bad that I was leaving them alone, but I needed to do this.

"We have something for you," Chris said, and he opened the back door in the kitchen, which led into the garage.

I followed him and Agatha. When I walked in, I saw a bright red hatchback Mazda.

Chris handed me the keys. "Agatha and I were planning on buying this for you and Aaron, since we knew you were going to Winchester Roth." Everyone fell silent for a moment, the heartache hanging thick in the air.

"Thank you," I whispered guiltily.

"No more tears," Chris said. "Tomorrow is a good day, a fresh start for Grace. The daughter we never had." But I could hear the sadness seeping through as if his voice was about to break.

"You really didn't have to do this," I said to them with tears burning my eyes.

"You are our family, Grace." Agatha put her hand on my shoulder.

"I love it," I said and hugged them both.

Chris patted my hand and followed Agatha out of the room; I knew how hard this was for them because it was unbearable for me.

I stared at the car for a long time, unable to imagine how I was going to get through this.

When I eventually went to my room, I closed the door and fell down onto my bed. I wept loudly into my pillow, trying to muffle the sound. I tossed and turned and when I looked at the oversized brown clock on the wall, I noticed it was almost time to get up. I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep before the long drive I was taking in a few hours.

Agatha knocked on my door early the next morning. "Grace, honey, breakfast is in the kitchen when you're ready."

I looked at my already packed bags and sighed heavily, it was time. I pulled on shorts and a sweater and went to the kitchen. Chris put down the newspaper he was reading when I walked in and smiled. "You ready, Pumpkin?"

I gave him a reassuring smile. "I am," I lied.

"Well then, you better have something to eat, so you can get going, it's a long drive." Agatha placed down a plate of bacon next to the freshly squeezed orange juice.

I forced whatever food I could down my throat and Chris carried my bags to the car. Agatha tried to busy herself with washing the dishes, but it seemed like she was aimlessly scrubbing the same plate. When it was finally time for me to leave, Chris insisted that he drive behind me, but I told him that it was only four hours away and I would call them every hour. I knew that they were anxious about me driving. Aaron's accident made them overly cautious when it came to me, almost paranoid. But we all agreed that it was not healthy, and they eased up as much as they could.

We said our last goodbyes, and then we all burst into tears. A few minutes later, my legs were shaking as I climbed into the car and drove away. I looked in my review mirror as I took the corner and saw Agatha falling into Chris's arms and my heart broke. This was going to be hard for all of us, in a strange way we had been the glue holding each other together over the past few months.

I drove on the deserted highway, when another painful memory filled my mind, about Aaron stealing Chris's car keys so we could learn how to drive. He was a much faster learner than I was, so when he claimed to be a self-proclaimed pro, he taught me. We could both drive easily by the time we turned seventeen. When Chris took us on the road, we pretended not to know what we were doing, and three weeks later we were driving. We always laughed at how impressed Chris and my dad were that we learned so fast.

I stopped at a gas station every hour and called as promised. Still, the drive was quick and before I knew it, I turned onto the dusty road that led to the college. I drove along the road marveling at the row of tall trees until I finally saw the sign—it was bigger than I pictured it and it was beautiful. The entrance had a large ornate iron gate with WRC embellished near the top. Bare, red brick walls stretched on either side, an imposing structure, rich with age and character.

I parked my car in the parking space allotted to students and climbed out. I looked around and took a deep breath of the unpolluted fresh air. The brochure did WRC no justice; it was way more than I could have ever imagined. It was built in a circular formation, and there were stony pathways leading to different faculties, which had lots of windows decorating it. I was only interested in one—the art building, which I decided to tour after I dropped my bags in my dorm room.

I walked over to the administration building to get my room key. The lady at the front desk peeked at me over a mountain of papers when I walked in. "Name please?" she inquired.

"Grace Delaney."

She sifted through her seemingly organized chaos and handed me a brown envelope with the room number G1 written on it. "Your room is on the ground floor, second building from this one," she quipped.

I stepped outside and spotted the building; its brick wall had been masked by dampened moss. I strolled over and swiped the blue tag that was given to me with my room key and it opened a set of glass doors. I walked down a narrow corridor; there were only two rooms on the ground floor. Mine was the first, and I wondered who I would be sharing a room with.

When I stepped inside, I was surprised at how big the room was, it was more like a miniature apartment. I strode into the lounge area. It had a brown leather sofa against a white wall and a wicker table by a glass sliding door with two chairs. The bedroom, to my surprise had only one single bed, a white sheet and no bedding. There was a brown wooden night stand next to it with a card on top of it.

I picked up the card and scanned it.

Hello Grace, welcome to Winchester Roth College. Your assigned dorm room partner has decided not to study at WRC this year, which means you have the dorm all to yourself. We hope you will enjoy all that WRC has to offer. Please contact the dorm administrator if you have any queries.

"Oh, that's just great," I groaned. "This is high school all over again. I couldn't even get a dorm room partner."

_You're being silly_ , I heard a voice in my head.

"Great! Now I'm hearing voices, too."

I walked outside and sauntered through a row of weeping cherry trees to get to the art studio. The map showed that it was a distance away from all the other buildings.

I finally saw the colossal white wooden doors of the art studio and rushed inside. The room was enormous, with high white walls and a shiny white and grey marble floor. I looked around wide eyed; some of the paintings were bigger than any artworks I had ever seen. I walked around in childlike wonder at the skillful pieces on the wall. They were done by present and past students and only the best was exhibited. It was like sports plaques, but instead of gold trophies, it was the most amazing paintings I have ever laid my eyes on.

I heard about this room and dreamed of having my own art displayed there one day. I looked up at the high ceiling and saw that someone copied a replica of Michael Angelo's Creation of Adam in the Sistine Chapel. There were large glass windows all around the room which was placed closed to the ceiling and the leaves of the tall trees were dancing in the wind, making it look like a moving photograph.

I walked around the studio for hours, hypnotized by every detail in each painting. I thought of how much I wanted to share this moment with Aaron. When I described this place to him, he laughed and pulled me into his arms, telling me he was glad that I was so excited. At that memory my knees gave way, and I fell to the floor and wept.

I wasn't sure how long I had been sitting with my knees pulled up to my chest when I heard a deep voice behind me.

"Hey, are you okay?"

I looked up as I felt him coming closer and I briefly stared into a set of dark brown eyes.

I wiped my eyes and looked down at my feet. "I'm fine," I grumbled.

"Don't I know you?" His gentle voice was raspy.

I was embarrassed. I needed to get out of there. I stood up quickly and ran back to my dormitory. I heard his voice trailing behind me but I didn't stop.

When I got back to my room, I climbed into my bed and continued crying. I had no idea how I was going to get through this year, or the rest of my life, without Aaron.
***

I woke up at 4am, thanks to my internal alarm clock which was broken ever since the funeral. I couldn't go back to sleep and started packing my clothes into the wooden cupboards, and then I packed my books into my purple leather backpack.

Today would be more orientation than actual classes, but I was still looking forward to it. I needed to focus my mind on something else. The only thing that had me anxious was the fact that classes started at the end of the week, and since it was Friday, I had no idea what I was going to do for the weekend.

I walked into my first class and stood in the doorway. I decided to get there early so that I could get a good seat for the year, which naturally was at the back of the class. The room was built in an auditorium style, divided into three sections with black leather seats.

I sat down in the middle row at the back with a cup of coffee I brought from my room and tried to ignore the ache in my chest.

The class was completely full before the professor was there and I wasn't surprised. WRC had one of the best art programs in the world.

When the professor walked in, everyone went quiet. He looked like a very polished art professor; not like the harebrained ones back home. He was tall, with a full head of wavy black hair which he combed to the back. With a slight British accent, he took us through the subject matter, for the year, and told us where to find the art studio, which I of course already knew.

The rest of the day was pretty much the same in all the classes, we went through the material for the year and received a few reading assignments. The final class of the day was one I was loathing, Math 101. Since it was our first year all art students were required to do science and math, although it made no sense to me that an art major would need to. This was Aaron's favorite subject, definitely not mine, and he often explained to me that the reason all students had to do it was because perhaps in their second year they wanted to change majors. I of course disagreed with him, telling him that I had never heard of an art student willing to give it up for numbers.

When I walked into the room, there was only one other person. It was the same guy from yesterday. He turned to look at me, but I looked away and quickly sat down.

The professor handed out our course material and told us which chapters to concentrate on for the semester.

"Now, I know that some of you are art majors, and you have a dislike for this subject," the professor said.

There were a few chuckles in the room.

"But you will all have to pass this subject to progress to your second year, so if anyone, art student, or other, has any difficulty with this course material, please collect a card for the tutor in front."

I thought that I had better hurry to get one of those cards, because without Aaron here I was definitely going to need some help.

When the professor ended the lesson however, I forgot all about getting the tutor's card and headed straight for the exit. I felt a firm, yet gentle hand on my wrist as soon as I was about to step outside. When I looked up I saw those encapsulating brown eyes again.

"Hey, are you doing okay today?" he asked.

"I'm fine, just some pre-college jitters," I said looking down at my feet.

"I think I have something that might help with that. Hey, Shaun," he called someone over. "Give me one of those flyers. There is a party tonight," he said as he handed it to me. "You should come and meet a few people."

I took it quickly and tried not to run away from him as I mumbled thanks.

There was a strange feeling in my stomach; I had felt it many times before with Aaron, but it couldn't be the same now. I didn't even know him. I eventually convinced myself that I was perhaps just desperate to fit in, to find a friend like Aaron, or perhaps it was the fact that I was not accustomed to male attention.

I headed over to the library after having a cheese sandwich for dinner. I was glad that they were open so late on the weekend.

The library was large; it had a section upstairs and downstairs and kind of reminded me of a scene from the Breakfast Club. I picked up a few of my favorite Shakespeare plays and strolled back to my room. Ever since I read my first Shakespearean play in the eighth grade which was none other than Romeo and Juliet, I feel in love with it and Aaron joined me in my quest to read all of his books.

It was still early, only six o' clock. I made myself a bowl of popcorn and picked up _Twelfth Night_ and started reading it. My eyes eventually became heavy and as I was closing them, I heard a voice in my head again.

Why don't you go to the party?

It was louder than before and I looked around.

I shook my head, I must be really tired. I walked to the kitchen to get a glass of water and when I turned around I saw Aaron! Yes Aaron! Leaning against the counter, staring at me, smiling at me!

I dropped the glass and it shattered to pieces by my feet. I blinked my eyes a few times and he was gone.

I was definitely losing my mind; I needed to get out of this room. But what would I do?

I remembered that there was a building next to the art studio; it had a sign above the door which read Painting Room. Perhaps that was where students went when they were feeling inspired.

I quickly swept up the pieces of glass, grabbed my jacket and walked over to the detached concrete building. When I reached for the bronze door knob, it was locked. I looked through the large wooden framed windows, but they were dusty and I couldn't see through them.

"Good evening, lassie," I heard a thick Scottish accent, and when I turned around, I was facing an old man with gray coveralls. His face was full of wrinkles as if he spent too much time in the sun and he had a rounded belly. "Do yer need some help?" he asked me.

"Good evening," I smiled. "I was just wondering if I could use this room to paint, but it seems like it has been locked for some time."

"Aye, that room hasn't been used in a lang time, but yer welcome to use it. A'body is always painting in the empty classrooms."

I smiled at his Scottish slang that was seeping through. "That's a shame, I would have loved to paint in here," I told him.

"I tell yer what, if yer willing to give me a hand to scrub some dirt off the windaes, you can use it as your personal painting studio."

"Really?" I asked excitedly. "I would love that! My name is Grace by the way."

"Pleasure to meet yer, lassie, I'm Andrew. Let me get a few things and we can start."

He brought all the cleaning materials we needed, which included a bucket of water, and separated a silver key from a large bunch and opened the door. The dust assaulted us as soon as we walked in and we coughed while opening the windows. Except for the dust and dirty windows, the room was perfect; there was nothing in it except an antique wooden stool and an easel. The floors were wooden and the walls were bare and white. There was a skylight which allowed just the right amount of light in the room and I imagined how glorious it would be in the day time.

We cleaned the floors and the windows, while Andrew told me about himself. He moved here from Scotland thirty years ago and worked at WRC since then. He met his wife when she came to Scotland on holiday. They exchanged addresses and wrote to each other by mail for ten years, but when he heard that someone else was interested in her he took all his savings and moved here to be close to her. The day he got off the airplane, he had nothing but a suitcase and an engagement ring. It was a beautiful story and I knew that I would never get a happy ending like his.

I didn't tell him much about myself except where I was from and he didn't pry any further. When we were almost done, Andrew disappeared. He came back with a few blank canvases, paints, and paint brushes.

"Thought yer might need these," he said.

"Thank you," I said as I opened the paints he had brought me. I could immediately see from their texture that these paints were expensive and I was eager to start.

Andrew pulled out an old bronze key and handed it to me. "I'll leave yer to it, lassie, don't stay too late and this is now officially yer key."

"Thank you for your help."

"Don't mention it, yer have yourself a guid evenin," he said and walked off.

I set a canvas on the easel in an upright position and sat down on the round brown stool. With the palette in one hand and the paint brush in the other, I started painting what I decided would be an interpretation of WRC.

I painted long sweeps of colors for what felt like only minutes to me; but past experiences had taught me that it was probably more like hours. I was adding in the final touches when I heard the wooden door creak open and I jumped up from my seat. I had forgotten to lock it.

When I turned around I saw him again, those dark brown eyes. He was leaning against the doorway, looking at my painting. "I don't know much about art, but that there looks pretty dark," he said, folding his arms.

I turned around to look at the painting. My interpretation of WRC had turned into an array of dark colors flowing into each other. It was indicative of my emotions, but I wasn't going to let him know that. If he was a seasoned art student on the other hand, he would see all my pain depicted on that canvas.

"It's nothing, I just didn't want to do anything too complicated," I said as I quickly took the painting down and faced it against the wall.

"Oh, that looks pretty complicated to me, I just don't know how deep that painting runs," he rubbed his hand over his chin.

There was silence for a moment.

"So, why weren't you at the party tonight? I was waiting just for you," he smiled.

I felt that weird feeling shoot through my body again. Why would he be waiting for me? He hardly knew me.

"I'm not much into parties, and if you would excuse me," I said as I picked up the key so he'd get the hint. "It's getting late." As I brushed past him, he put his hand on my arm for the second time today and I looked up into his alluring brown eyes.

"I really do have this feeling that I know you from somewhere," he said.

I took a step back and studied him this time, the perfectly sculpted oval face, short dark hair and muscular frame. I did know him.

"Chase Ryder?" I asked, shocked. "You were at my high school!"

"Oh, yeah." The corners of his mouth curled up. "Thought I had seen you around."

We didn't have any classes together and I mostly kept to myself, I guess that's why I didn't immediately recognize him. "I remember that there were rumors flying around that you dropped out of high school and served time in juvi," I said.

"Not rumors." His smile faded and he put his hand in his black jeans. "I went and finished high school while serving time."

That sounded scary. I was standing alone with a boy who went to juvenile hall and I didn't know why I wasn't running away.

"So, what other rumors have you heard about me that I can put to rest?" He stepped closer to me and I could smell his ocean fresh cologne.

"Not a rumor," I told him, "but the only reason why I even know you, is because someone warned me to stay far away from the notorious womanizer, Chase Ryder. I am pretty sure you slept with every girl at my school."

"Well, that there is a rumor, ma'am, because I didn't sleep with you."

"In your dreams, Ryder," I said as I turned and walked away.

I heard him chuckle. "Hey, I don't know your name!"

"That's because I never gave it," I shouted back. I picked up my pace suddenly and as I turned the corner, I stood against the brick wall just outside my building and took a few deep breaths. I was going to school with Chase Ryder. That was going to be really interesting, but one thing was for damn sure, I needed to stay away from that boy!

Chapter 3

Although I was awake early Saturday morning, I decided to lay in bed for a while. I was thinking about what to do for the rest of the day when I heard a voice next to me say: _"Good morning, Sunshine."_ I slowly turned my head and screamed as I jumped up, when I realized who it was lying next me.

Aaron was propped up on his elbow smiling at me. "Aaron?" I gasped. "How...? I mean... Am I dreaming?"

He shook his head.

"Then you're really here?" I asked as tears started filling my eyes.

"Well, not exactly."

"You're still dead...?"

"The last time I checked," he chuckled. "I am just here to make sure you're going to make it on your own."

"This can't be," I said as the tears spilled over. "I must be going completely insane because I can smell you from all the way over here."

I closed my eyes and shook my head and when I opened them he was gone.

My body was numb as I stared at the bed, how could Aaron be here with me, when I watched them lower his body to the ground? He seemed so real, so alive.

I opened the drawer beside my bed and pulled out my phone. My hands were shaking as I scrolled through my contacts. I eventually found the number I was looking for, Dr. Parker emergency, and hit dial.

"Hello," I heard her groggy voice on the other line.

"Doctor Parker," I said, instantly regretting the fact that I woke her up so early. "It's Grace. I am terribly sorry for waking you up this early but... I sort of think I'm going mad."

"Hi, Grace, no it's perfectly fine. What is troubling you?" she asked.

I liked Doctor Parker and she was very good at what she did, the first time I met her we were only halfway through the session when I decided that I trusted her. I told her everything that ever happened to me and she never once looked at me in a way that screamed hopeless case. I wasn't sure how to start with this, though.

"It's okay, Grace," she said as if she read my mind. "Tell me..."

"Okay, well...I think—actually, I know—I just saw Aaron. He was in my room twice!"

"I'm sorry. Grace, I don't follow, could you perhaps elaborate?"

At least she wasn't letting on that it was one of the craziest things she ever heard.

"Well, the first time I was drinking a glass of water and then he just sort of appeared and disappeared and this morning the same thing happened. He is also...speaking to me as if he is really here."

"Aaah," Doctor Parker said. "Now I understand."

"Am I going mad?"

"No, you aren't. You were experiencing what we would call an anomalous experience. It is just a technical way of saying you are having hallucinations, which is no doubt a grief coping mechanism for you."

"It felt very real to me," I told her.

"I'm sure it does, your subconscious is trying to hold on to the connection that you have with Aaron in any way that it can."

"Okay, I get all of that, but what should I do when I see him?"

She was quiet for a moment. "I think that for now, you should speak to him. Most of the time it is your own mind trying to make sense of things and in a way you would be answering yourself. When you are ready and able to connect to him in other ways, like holding onto the memories you had together, the hallucinations will stop."

"This really does sound like I am going crazy, seeing a dead person, talking to him!"

"Trust me, Grace, you aren't, many people have experienced what you are going through and I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but in time it will get better."

"Thank you, Doctor Parker."

"Grace, try not to be so hard on yourself, you have gone through many challenging situations in your young life and losing Aaron was the hardest. It's a process and it will take time. Call me anytime you need me."

After we said goodbye, I sat on my bed and thought about what she said; maybe seeing Aaron was not such a bad thing. I was shocked initially, but I would give anything to have him here with me and even if it was in ghost form, I would take it.

I walked into the kitchen and called him softly, "Aaron you there?"

Nothing... I felt pretty stupid, but tried again. "Aaron are you...?" I heard a loud thump on the door and gave out a little shriek.

"Hey, are you okay in there?"

I knew that voice and it was not the one I wanted to hear right now. I walked toward the door and swung it open.

"Can I help you, Chase?"

"Hey, neighbor, everything okay?"

"I'm fine, thought I saw a mouse. Did you need something?"

"Someone is in a mood," he grinned. He held up a white box, "I made some muffins, thought you might like some."

My stomach started to do a few tumbles; I needed to go shopping for groceries. I didn't find the time since I got here and the few things Agatha convinced me to take were finished.

"Thanks," I said as I took it. He gave me a weird smile that made me blush. "What?" I asked him, "You look like a mad man."

"Nothing," he said as he walked away, "just admiring all those cute furry bunnies."

I instinctively closed my night gown; I forgot that besides my white and pink bunny slippers, I was wearing a matching top and shorts with white and pink bunnies all over.

I closed the door with flushed cheeks, and put the container on the counter. I looked at it for a while and then I took one out and bit into it. It was banana flavored and it was delicious and moist. I could hardly believe that he was the one who made it.

" _You need to eat more,"_ I heard a voice behind me as I was about to take the second bite. This time I was less jumpy. I turned around slowly, afraid that he might disappear again. I looked at him, he was wearing the same khaki shorts and white shirt as when I last saw him. I ran to him but all I caught was air.

"No touching the ghosts," he laughed.

"Oh, Aaron," I started crying. "I have missed you so much."

"I know, Gracy," he said. "Please, don't cry. I am staying as long as you need me to."

"I know," I sniffed. "Doctor Parker told me all about my latest mental condition and I am taking you any way I can have you."

He went to stand by the window. "College looks nice," he said.

"Just like we imagined it would be," I said as I went to stand next to him. "I wish you were here," I sighed.

"So, tell me," he said as he turned to look at me, "what is this business about you not eating anything, you're as thin as a rake."

"I just couldn't," I said as I looked down, "I couldn't do much this past year without you."

"You have to eat, Gracy, you have to do better. Go out and make friends and spend less time in this house or you really will go mad."

"I know," I nodded. "Maybe you should go shopping with me today to make sure I pack all the essentials," I joked.

We were interrupted by something being slid under the door and I hesitantly walked away from Aaron to pick it up.

Hey neighbor.

Party tonight! Everyone will be expecting you, since it is on our block.

-Chase

Party? Our block? And this was the second time he is calling me his neighbor. What exactly did he mean? There was only one other dorm on the floor. I held the note against my head as I thought about it and then suddenly it dawned on me. The loud music, the thumping against the wall, eww! I didn't even want my mind to go there. Was Chase the one living next door to me? This was getting weirder by the minute.

Aaron startled me by looking over my shoulder. " _You should go,"_ he told me, and before I could answer he was gone.

After seeing Aaron, I immediately felt better...happier. I decided to go to the shop to buy groceries. I quickly jumped into the shower and dried my hair. It felt like it was going to be a hot day so I put on a knee length, off-the-shoulder blue dress. When I walked outside, I realized I was right about the weather. The sun assaulted me and I squinted all the way to the parking lot. I knew I should have packed a pair of shades, but I was desperate to get to the mall. I got into my car and searched for the nearest mall in my GPS. I was relieved to see that it was only twenty minutes away.

I plugged in my iPod and scrolled to a playlist, entitled _Playlist for Gracy_. Aaron made it for me because he knew I was an acoustic junkie. One of my favorite songs started playing: " _Color me in_ ," by Damien Rice.

I arrived at the mall, which was really just a big two story building surrounded by grass and trees. It was made of brown and red bricks and had an entrance so big I wondered if they had a door big enough for it. While I marveled at it, I heard a familiar silky voice next to me and I whipped my head to the side. "Aaron, you scared the heck out of me!"

"You better get used to it," he laughed.

"What are you doing here?"

"You said I should come with you to make sure you packed in all the essentials."

"That was a joke," I said as I got out. "I didn't think you would come."

We walked to the entrance and once we were inside, I noticed that the lower level of the store held the food. It had shiny white floors and more aisles than I expected. There weren't many people which made the monotonous instrumental music blasting from the speakers seem louder.

I took one of the metal shopping carts and headed straight for the meat section. I placed one pack of chicken in the cart and Aaron told me to put in another two. It carried on like that throughout our shopping expedition and at one point I turned to him and said, "Seriously, Aaron, I can't eat so much it's going to go to waste!" And then I had a full out argument with a ghost. I only realized how insane I looked when an elderly gentleman tapped me on the shoulder and asked if I was okay.

I blushed and told him that I was fine and refused to speak to Aaron until we were in the car again.

"I think I will go shopping on my own from now on."

"Why, so that you can buy ridiculously small amounts of food?" He looked at me with his gorgeous, clear blue eyes.

"That, and so that I don't look like a crazy person talking to you, or myself or whatever," I snapped.

"Gracy, you promised me," he said.

"I know, Aaron, and I promise I will start eating, I just need you to take it easy on me."

He nodded.

With the shopping bags packed in my car, we drove home in silence while listening to the rest of the playlist. I felt a strange sense of peace having him next to me and I didn't ever want it to end.

When I got home, I awkwardly tried to carry all the shopping bags at once.

"Sorry I can't help you, Gracy," Aaron told me and I just had to laugh at the thought of him trying to grab shopping bags.

Before I could get to the building entrance, Chase came jogging toward me with no shoes on his feet. "Hey, let me help you with that." He took the bags before I could protest.

"Where did you come from?" I asked him cynically. "Hope you weren't watching and waiting for me to come back."

He smiled cheekily. "What if I was?" I could see him challenging me with his eyes.

I looked over my shoulder, and to my relief, Aaron was gone. Although he was only a figment of my imagination, I didn't want him to witness this.

"So," Chase said as I opened the door for him to walk inside, "are you ready for the party tonight?"

"And what makes you think I am going to your party?"

"Correction," he said as he put the bags on the counter, "it's our party."

I shook my head. "I told you, I am not a partying kind of girl."

"Then what kind of girl are you, Grace?" he asked as he stepped closer to me.

I swallowed nervously and turned around. "I just want to get through college without any distractions, and just so you know Chase," I said bravely turning back toward him, "your charm would be better spent on someone else."

"Grace, you will soon learn that in this life, some distractions are needed," he whispered in my ear.

And before I could answer, he walked away and closed the door.

I put my hand over my chest and took a deep breath. I could not believe the impudence of this guy. I would seriously have to watch myself around him; he was getting too far under my skin. And from what I heard about Chase Ryder, I knew he would take my heart and rip it to shreds. Besides, the only man I had ever loved died and there would never be anyone who would be able to replace him.

After I stuffed the food in the fridge, I decided to go over to the art studio for a while to paint. I needed something to relax me after my encounter with Chase and I didn't want him dragging me to the party later. Although it wasn't a good hide out since he found me there yesterday.

I walked from my building across the lawn to that art studio; it was quiet on campus today, not a student in sight. I wondered where everyone hung out on the weekends; maybe I should ask Chase about that.

I unlocked the room and found my latest piece standing there. I picked it up and put it back on the easel. It looked even gloomier, now that it had dried, and the light was bouncing off it. I took it off again and replaced it with a clean canvas and started painting.

I thought of a place in my hometown that Aaron and I loved to go to. I started off with the ocean; it was where we would go to almost every Saturday afternoon. I added the wooden bridge which was at the far end of the beach. Directly underneath the bridge was a secret spot Aaron and I had found; it was a curved piece of wood which formed a seat. We would climb down there and because of the size of the seat, we would be forced to sit closely together. My skin touching his. We would stay like that for hours as we watched the waves crashing on the shore. Sometimes the waves would get so high it would touch our feet and I would squeal in delight.

After I had painted the background, I thought of painting him and me, the way we used to sit there. But I wanted the truth reflected in the painting and the truth was that I would never sit there with Aaron again. I was suddenly overcome with anger as I threw the paint brush against the wall sobbing.

I didn't know how long I sat staring at that empty bridge after I wiped away my tears. But when I walked back to my room it had gotten dark and the only light that was shining between my building and the art studio was the moonlight.

I could hear the music as I approached and I quickly walked to my room and locked the door. I didn't want to chance running into Chase. I made myself a chicken sandwich and I only managed one bite before I went to lie down on my bed. The music was annoyingly loud and I knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep. I closed my eyes and sighed deeply and when I opened them again, Aaron was next to me. I knew better than to jump off my bed screaming, but my heart fluttered to see him lying there as if he were real. I wanted to reach out to touch him. So, I did. I placed my hand where his cheek might have been and tried to remember the way his rugged skin felt before he shaved it.

"Grace," he looked at me, his eyes as sad as the day he came over to tell me that his dog Kibbles had been put down. "I can't stand to see you spending all your time alone. Life dealt you an unfair hand; it did a number on both of us. But you have to get over it sometime."

A lone tear escaped and trickled down my cheek. The harsh reality of his words hit me hard. Who was I to be so damn selfish? I was not the one who got the shitty deal, not really! I was alive and he wasn't. I was the one who got to experience everything that he didn't. Who was I to complain? I just wanted him here with me so badly.

"Grace, get up, put on that pretty white dress of yours and go to that party," he pleaded.

I nodded, I wanted to do this for him, I owed him that much. I dragged myself off the bed and searched for the white dress he was talking about. It was his favorite. A sleeveless white, A-line dress with a brown belt around the waist. I put on my brown sandals and a shade of pink lipstick. I took my auburn hair out of the bun and ruffled it a bit, pushing my fringe forward.

I looked in the mirror, although I was as thin as a rake as Aaron put it, I still had my curves which I got from my mother. I also inherited her brownish green eyes. The only thing I had really inherited from my dad was the freckles sprinkled on my cheeks.

I took a deep breath as I locked my door to go next door. I walked past a few people standing around in the hallway and stood by the front door which was wide open.

It was only once I was in his apartment that I could make out the song which just sounded like bass coming through my walls. It was Train's " _Hey soul sister_."

I wasn't sure what I was doing there, I didn't know anyone. I hardly knew the guy who was throwing the party. I looked around awkwardly for him. I finally spotted him sitting on a gray sofa with two pretty blondes on either one of his legs. When he turned to look at me, I immediately knew this was a huge mistake and quickly turned.

"Grace," I heard his voice as I reached my door. "Wait!"

"I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking coming tonight, I mean the only person I know is obviously busy with his... extramural activities."

"Come on, Grace. I've been waiting the whole night for you," he smiled.

"Funny, it didn't look that way to me." I frowned. "And I'm suddenly tired," I said trying hard to show him that his gorgeous smile had absolutely no effect on me.

"Please, just come around for a little while and then I'll walk you home myself."

I had to laugh at that.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I just got my first laugh." He threw his hand in his air like he just won something.

"Don't get used to it," I smirked at how crazy he looked. "Fine, I will go to your party for a bit."

He grabbed my hand and my heart thudded in my chest. This was wrong in every sense of the word and yet my feet kept moving forward.

He pulled me into the room and then stood on the table and announced me like I was the queen.

"Everyone? This is Grace! Grace? This is everyone!"

"You're insane," I mouthed to him.

I gave an awkward wave and everyone grumbled a hello.

"Who is this absolutely beautiful woman I see before me?" I heard a voice behind me. I turned around and looked into a pair of dark blue eyes; his blond hair was tied in a ponytail. He was not as muscular as Chase but still buff and his skin was slightly tanned. Chase jumped from the table and stepped in between us.

"Sebastian, this is Grace. Grace, this is my roommate Sebastian," he rambled.

"You mean this is the Grace that lives next door?" he asked, surprised and his eyes sparkled like I was a shiny diamond.

"Yes, and if you don't mind, I was showing her around," Chase said and took my hand again.

"Nice to meet you," I said as Chase pulled me around the corner.

"You should stay away from him," he said sternly.

"Excuse me?" I said as I pulled my hand out of his grasp and stepped back. Just what the hell is happening right now? "Since when do you give me orders, I barely even know you!"

"I'm sorry," he said, "I just... Just be careful around here okay. People are not always who they seem to be."

'I'm a big girl, Chase, and I can take care of myself."

"Very well," he said. "I'm sorry, would you like to continue our tour?"

"There are two rooms, a bathroom and a tiny living room, with a kitchen behind it. How much of a tour could there be?" I raised my brows.

"There's always my room you haven't seen," he grinned.

"I think I should stay out of there. My room is directly next to yours and it sounds like all whips and chains in there."

He laughed as he opened the door we were standing next to. "See for yourself."

I stuck my head in and didn't try to hide my surprise. The room was very neat, with a window above the bed. The bed had black bedding on it and the walls were bare. Or at least I thought it was until I walked further in. What caught my attention was not the huge speakers hanging on the walls I was facing, or the microphone, but the two guitars that were hanging on either side of the door. "Do you play?" I asked him.

"I dabble," he smiled mysteriously.

I walked closer to the guitars on the wall and when I realized what it was, I pointed to the one on the left and took my voice up an octave. "Are you serious? Is this a 1950 Stromberg master?" I brushed my fingers over the tanned wood and turned around to look at him.

His mouth was nearly hanging open. "You know what kind of guitar that is?"

"Yes," I breathed. "This thing must have cost you an arm and a leg. Wait, are you secretly loaded?"

He shifted his feet uncomfortably. "I inherited it from someone," he said.

"Well then you must have one super rich family," I said in awe. "How do you not play and you have these bad boys?"

"Do you play?" He cocked his head to the side and lifted a brow.

"I used to, not that much anymore."

He took the beautiful red fender off a hook and offered it to me. "Why don't you play something?"

I chucked nervously and shook my head. "It's been too long, I don't think I know an A chord from a G," I lied. There was no way I was going to play for him.

He grinned and put it back. "Maybe one day when you remember," he said and I realized how close we were standing to one another. I could feel his warm breath on my skin and it made my hair stand on end.

"I think it's time for me to go," I said as I looked at my watch. "It's way past my bedtime."

"But you just got here?" he creased his forehead.

"Well that's because I promised a nagging neighbor of mine that I would come and since I dutifully made my appearance I think it's time for me to be going?"

"But you haven't seen my party trick yet," he retorted.

I pursed my lips together, "I'm sure there are women inside who would be more impressed than me."

"Ouch, I'm wounded," he placed his hand over his heart.

"I will bring over a band aid next time," I quipped. It's been...enlightening being here tonight, thanks for inviting me."

"You can come around anytime invitation or not," he said. "Let me walk you home."

"You mean next door." I shook my head

He laughed. "I like you, Grace, and I think we're going to be great friends."

"Who said we were friends?" I asked him.

"Well, unless you wanted more than friendship..." He gave me a cheeky grin.

"Friendship it is," I chirped.

He laughed as he walked me to my door, which was literally twenty or so steps away from his apartment door.

"Good night, Chase," I said as I opened the door.

"What, you're not going to invite me in?"

"I think your time would be better spent with those two brooding blondes waiting in your room;" I said and closed the door. I leaned against it and took a deep breath.

"By the way," Chase said on the other side of the door. "No girl besides you has ever been in my room." I heard his footsteps as he walked away.

I think I might have stopped breathing for a second and then I shook my head. Chase was bad news, I knew this. So why didn't I stay away from him?

" _Grace, how was the party?"_ That sweet voice I loved to hear broke me out of my thoughts. It was Aaron. I stared at him for a moment before answering, he always looked so real.

"It was okay," I shrugged.

"I'm glad you went out of this apartment for a bit," he said.

I walked to the bathroom. "I am going to get dressed, don't go anywhere. I quickly slipped into my second pair of bunny covered PJ's and strolled into the living room. I pulled a blanket out of the closet and went to sit next to Aaron on the sofa. A wave of sadness washed over me as we silently watched a movie on TV. It reminded me of all the weekends we would spend doing this, how we sat closely under the covers and him never knowing how much I wanted to kiss him. Or how he used to playfully feed me popcorn, which was a game to him but set the butterflies into motion in my stomach. The only difference was that when I fell asleep this time, instead of falling asleep on his muscular arm, it was the hard shoulder of the couch.

****

It felt like I had just closed my eyes when I heard the door bell ringing. I looked over the sofa at the clock in the kitchen and saw that it was still early. I lifted myself up and groaned because of my aching body. I dragged my feet to the door, with a blue knitted blanket thrown over my shoulders. When I opened the door, Chase was standing in front of me and I noticed he was wearing black and green running gear and holding two cups of coffee in his hand.

"Hey," he grinned, "I went for a run and thought I should bring my friend a cup of coffee."

"Sure, friend," I said as I opened the door wider, "it's not early at all. Please come in."

He set the coffee cups on the kitchen table and looked at me while leaning on it. "You and rabbits sure go well together." He grinned.

I once again forgot about the skimpy shorts and sweater I was wearing. "Be right back," I said as I ran to the room and put on a robe.

When I came back, he was standing by the window sipping his coffee. I could definitely see what all the fuss was about, not only was he strikingly handsome, every part of his body was muscular. He looked like a cover model straight off a sports magazine. I blinked a few times when I realized I was staring.

He turned to look at me. "So what are you up to today?"

"Haven't thought about it yet, maybe take a tour of the town."

"You shouldn't do that alone; you can't find all the cool places on your GPS. You should let me show you around," he said. "Maybe next weekend?" he offered.

"What's wrong with today?" I asked.

"I have something going on today," he said and his face suddenly changed from playful to hard and serious.

"Okay," I agreed. "Next week sounds perfect, thank you."

He looked at his watch and got up abruptly. "I have to leave," he said.

"Chase?" I spoke up as he was almost out by the door. "Did I say something wrong?"

His face softened. "No, baby, I just forgot to watch the time."

"Friends, remember," I warned him.

He walked back toward me, chuckling. "Yeah, I remember," he said planting a kiss on my cheek. "Later, friend," he smiled as he closed the door.

I put my hand on my cheek when he left, my heart pounding madly in my chest. I couldn't allow him to affect me this way; I was the one who suggested we be friends.

A few minutes later I watched by the window as Chase pulled out of the driveway. He had a look of anger, or maybe it was heartache, on his face, and I wondered what could bother such a seemingly carefree person. But more importantly, I wondered why I had this longing to make that hurt go away.

***

I walked around aimlessly in the house for the rest of the morning, I was hoping that Aaron would appear but he didn't, so I got dressed and decided to take a walk around campus. As I was about to leave, I heard a knock on the door again. I quickly went to open it and was surprised when I saw Agatha standing there.

"Agatha," I smiled, "what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry I didn't call, Grace, I just wanted to see you."

"No, I'm really happy to see you," I hugged her. "I just thought you were someone else."

"Oh really? I am glad you are settling in and making friends." Agatha walked in and surveyed the place. "This is nice," she said. "I brought you something." She walked back into the hallway and handed me my guitar bag with my guitar inside. "You left this at home."

"Thanks," I gave her a half-smile, both of us knowing that I intentionally never brought it with me. It stirred up too many painful emotions.

She went into full mother mode as soon as I closed the door. "Are you getting enough to eat?" she asked as she opened the fridge to check my food supply, "and drinking all your vitamins?" She peered inside my cupboards.

"Yes," I said, realizing how much I missed her. I watched her walking around opening and closing cupboard doors. You would never say from her perfect figure and young appearance that she is...was... a mother to a teenage son. She sat down on the couch and patted it, "come sit," she said. "Tell me how you've been. Chris and I are having sleepless nights worrying about you."

"You really shouldn't worry; I have been enjoying it so far." I went to sit next to her. "The only thing is that Dad hasn't called yet," I told her.

"I'm sure it's the bad reception, honey, he will call you as soon as he can."

"I know," I told her feeling hurt anyway.

"And College? Did you make lots of new friends?"

"College is fine, friends not really," I blushed, not wanting to divulge any information about Chase. Mostly because I felt guilty that I was moving on with my life and Aaron was gone.

"Well," she said, "you better make some soon. I don't want a repeat of what happened at home. You know Aaron is not here..." she trailed off. Starting the conversation we both wanted to avoid. The tears in her eyes set off my own.

"I miss him; it's so hard being here without him, knowing that we were supposed to do this together," I told her.

"I know," she said as she held me.

"There is a beautiful running trail that I know he would have dragged me on," I told her and we both laughed through our tears at the memory of Aaron always trying to convince me to get fit.

Agatha let go of me and wiped away a tear that was rolling down my cheek. We spent the rest of the afternoon crying and reminiscing about Aaron and the more we spoke, the more I realized just what an amazing person he was. No one would ever be able to replace him or make me feel the way he did.

After Agatha made something to eat, she left with a warning that I should cook wholesome foods, and make friends and I promised her that I would.

All that crying left me drained and was still wiping away a tear or two when I heard another knock on my door. I thought perhaps Agatha had forgotten something, but when I swung the door open, Chase stood there smiling at me. His smile quickly faded, which I could only assume was a result of him seeing my red, puffy eyes. He stepped inside without invitation and closed the door. "Grace, are you okay?" he asked but before I could answer him, he wrapped his muscular arms around me.

I didn't know what came over me, but I just let everything go, and he said nothing while I silently sobbed. After a few minutes of him holding me, he lifted me up in his arms and carried me to my bed. He put me down and lay down next to me with his arms still wrapped around me.

I knew that what was happening was weird since we didn't know each other, and I knew Chase probably realized in that moment that I was crazy. But being with someone who was unattached to this situation and who didn't share in this awful heartache, felt comforting. He held me until my tears stopped rolling and my breathing became heavy. I was too drained to tell him to leave, so I eventually drifted off to sleep with him still holding me in his arms.

Chapter 4

The sun in my room woke me up the next morning and I momentarily forgot that there was someone else lying in my bed. When I turned around and saw Chase next to me, I jumped up and put my hand over my mouth to stop the scream that was threatening to come out.

I walked into the kitchen and paced up and down. Now that I had my wits about me, this whole situation seemed completely messed up. I heard footsteps coming from my room and I cringed. I didn't want to face him.

"Good morning," he said cautiously.

"Good morning," I whispered. "I'm sorry about last night, I just had a crazy girly moment," I said with my back still facing him.

I could hear him walking closer to me and then felt the heat of his body on my back. He took my hand and turned me to face him. "It's not crazy and you don't have to tell me what's going on. Just tell me that you are okay?"

"I am," I told him and stared up into his apprehensive brown eyes. "Thanks for staying with me last night."

"It was nothing, that's what friends do, right?" he said with a hint of trepidation in his voice.

I nodded and looked at the time. "I had better get ready for class," I said as I moved past him.

He gently grabbed my wrist, "Grace, call me whenever you need me okay?"

I gave him a tight smile and walked into my bedroom. When I shut the door, I was gasping for air. There was something weird happening between Chase and I, and I didn't want to think about it. I wouldn't allow myself to go there. It was unfair to Aaron's memory and it was unfair on me. Chase was a heart breaking philanderer, and I had enough heartbreak to last me a lifetime.

When I came out of my room, Chase was gone and there was a note on the black counter top.

I will bring over some food later. We can watch a movie or something.

Call me if you need me

Chase

I stared at the note. Besides Aaron, I never really had any friends so I wasn't the best person to judge whether or not this could actually be a 'bff' situation where Chase was concerned. But deep down I knew I was heading for trouble.

I arrived at my first class early, which was English literature. It was my first time in this class because the professor wasn't available during orientation week. As soon as I sat down a girl came to sit next to me. She had brown curly hair, matching skin tone and deep set dark green eyes. She had the complexion of a porcelain doll.

"Hey," she said, "I'm, Bobby."

_Strange name_ , I thought, and even stranger that she chose to sit next to me, since the entire auditorium was open.

"Hey," I smiled suspiciously, my paranoia driven by watching too many movies with mean college girls in them. "I'm, Grace."

"Nice to meet you, Grace," she smiled genuinely and I relaxed. The seats started filling up fast and the professor walked in. Mr. Farrel was younger than I thought and quite handsome, with a full head of curly ginger hair and square-shaped glasses.

We went through one of the books we would be reading for the year which also happened to be one of my favorites, _The Picture of Dorian Gray_ , and by the time class was over I had a pretty good sense of who Bobby was and that I would like her as a friend. We had most of our classes together, which I hadn't noticed before. In each class, she begged someone to swop seats with her, so that she could be next to me and I also noticed that she was very persuasive.

Lunch time, we headed to the cafeteria to eat together; we both ordered a sandwich and while we were waiting, I heard someone dragging one of the metal chairs. From the corner of my eye I saw the chair being put down next to me and when I looked up, I looked straight into Chase's still concerned brown eyes. I wished he would just forget the whole incident of last night.

"Okay if I sit?" he asked. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Hey," Bobby said as she extended her hand across the table, "Bobby."

Chase flashed her a million dollar, charmer sort of smile. One that was obviously reserved for his future conquests because I had never seen it before. "Hey, Bob, nice to meet you."

He leaned closer to me, "I'll see you tonight, just wanted to check how your day was going," he told me, both of us knowing that there was a deeper meaning behind that statement.

Bobby put her head in her hands and sighed as she watched Chase walk off. "Is that man real or am I still dreaming?" I burst out laughing.

"Oh, sorry, Grace," she snapped out of her day dream. "I didn't mean to check out your boyfriend, but does he have a brother?"

"He is not my boyfriend," I said quickly "and I don't know him well enough to know if he has a brother."

"Either way," Bobby told me, "I'm staying away from that, the way you two looked at each other. I am sure you will be more than friends soon," she grinned.

I shook my head. "Let's get to class," I said, trying not to show how much her comment affected me.

I floated in and out of my next two classes; I couldn't stop thinking about what Bobby said. Did Chase feel it too? I didn't want to give him any ideas; there was no way that I would ever date someone like Chase Ryder. He would use me and toss me, that was his MO and I wasn't going to change that. Why was I even considering being with Chase any way, I must be losing my mind?

The last class of the day was art practical, my favorite subject. Miss Demerol was everything you would expect from an art teacher; she was the complete opposite of our art theory professor. She wore a colorful dress and smiled throughout the entire lesson.

"I would like to give you your first assignment," she said. "Everyone is to paint their interpretation of a chapter out of their lives; it should be something personal that caused you to grow in one way or another. It will count toward your final grade at the end of the year. When the lesson ended, Bobby and I exchanged numbers and I headed to the art studio. I was eager to start on my painting assignment.

When I walked inside, I was welcomed by the smell of paints. I closed the door and shrugged my bag off my shoulders.

I knew what I wanted to paint and I wanted to do it perfectly, so I spent several hours on the underpainting. The moonlight started trickling in through the window alerting me to how late it was getting, but I wasn't done yet. I turned around to get my bottled water out of my bag and was startled when I saw Chase leaning against the wooden door frame with a crooked smile on his face.

"You look beautiful when you paint, peaceful," he said with a sudden aggrieved look on his face.

I wiped my hands down the front of my apron. "How long have you been standing there?" I asked him, trying to ignore the fact that he just called me beautiful.

"Not long enough," he sighed. "I was waiting for you to come back to your room, the pizza is getting cold." He moved closer toward me.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I stammered, "I lost track of time."

"Shall we?" he said as he walked to the door and presented his arm. I looked at it. "Just friends, I promise," he said.

"Fine," I said as I locked the door behind me and cautiously hooked my arm through his. We walked in uncomfortable silence to my room, where he politely excused himself and went to fetch the pizza in his room.

When he returned, he flopped down next me to me on the couch and he slotted a movie into the machine, it was a comedy I had never watched before and I laughed nervously as I realized how close he was sitting. I must have fallen asleep some time during the second movie, because when I woke up, there was a blanket pulled over me and Chase was gone.

I got up to lock the door but when I came closer, I saw the key on the floor and the door already locked.

I stood staring at the door shivering. I was adamant that all I could ever be to such a dangerous man was a friend, so why did it feel like I was free falling straight into Chase Ryder's arms?

I decided that I was going to try to put some distance between us, maybe I should hook him up with Bobby. She seemed to like him. But the thought of it left me feeling sick to my stomach.

I needed to see Aaron to clear my head, although that sounded crazy even to me, needing to see a dead person to feel sane. Never the less, I hadn't seen him in days and I needed to. I looked at the red clock standing on my kitchen top. I had a few hours left until I needed to get up for school, maybe strumming a few chords on my guitar would bring him here, he always loved to fall asleep while I played.

I went to fetch it in my bedroom closet and sat down on the bed. I looked at the guitar and instantly became misty eyed at all the memories it invoked of him.

I thought of the very first day Aaron saw me playing; I was sitting in the back yard learning to play a difficult song. I had finally mastered it when he came up behind me. He listened to me play until the song ended and when I looked up I saw him standing over me with glassy eyes. He told me that he had never heard anything more beautiful and from that day on he always asked me to play him something when he was having a rough day. I would play for him and most days he would fall asleep while listening to me.

I strummed the guitar as I thought of which song to play. I ended up playing the song nothing compares to you with tears rolling my down my face.

" _Hey,_ " a familiar voice interrupted me, " _why the sad song_?"

"Aaron," I breathed relieved when I saw him standing at the door.

" _Don't stop, Gracy, it's beautiful._ " He walked toward me and lied down on the bed.

I finished the song, put the guitar next to my bed and went to lie next to him. I didn't want to say anything; I didn't want him to disappear again. I had a sense of calm and although I knew that this crazy euphoria would end sometime, I wasn't willing to think about that yet. So I did what we did so many nights in my room, I looked into his blue eyes and he watched me until I fell asleep.

When my alarm clock buzzed, I opened my eyes slowly knowing that he would be gone.

I looked at the empty space next to me and dragged myself up. I quickly hopped in and out of the shower and dried my hair. The season was changing and the mornings were getting colder. I put on a pair of black jeans, a red jacket over my white t-shirt and my black boots. When I stepped outside the air was as chilly as I suspected and I rushed over to the English building. When I walked in Bobby was waiting at the door.

"Hey, girly," she smiled widely.

"Hey," I returned her smile.

"So," she said, hooking her arm into mine. "I wanted to know if you're doing anything tonight."

"Nope," I shook my head, "not doing anything, why?"

"Well, there is this gig at the Round House tonight and I thought we could go."

"The what?" I asked.

"I'm friends with a nerd," she chuckled. "The Round House is a place behind campus which is apparently run by the music students, but only the best of the best get to play there. I've been told that tonight one of the best bands to ever put their feet on that stage is playing."

"What type of music do they play?" I asked.

"Who cares?" Bobby sighed. "All I know is they called the Bleeding Hearts. You in?"

"Sure, why not," I shrugged.

"Great," she squealed, "but we have to be there early because it apparently gets really full and they only allow a certain amount of people in."

"Where are you guys off to and why didn't I get an invite?" I heard that familiar husky voice behind me.

"Hey, Chase," Bobby went instantly red. "We're going to see a band at The Round House."

I spun around and looked straight into his eyes. "Hi," he smiled sweetly causing my stomach to flip flop, this was a smile I hadn't seen before.

"Hi," I whispered.

"If you lovely ladies really do want to go," he said, "I know a few of the guys in the band, I could get a pass or two."

Bobby's green eyes gleamed with excitement, "we would love that, wouldn't we, Grace?" She nudged me.

"Umm, yeah, sure," I said.

"I'll drop it at your place later," Chase told me and he gave me another one of his beautiful sweet smiles before he left.

"Grace, I take it all back, you are not a nerd, you know all the right people," she squealed.

I sighed, so much for my plan to stay away from Chase. What was he even doing in this building, I am pretty sure that he didn't have an English class here, at least I never saw him here before.

Bobby was rambling on about the gig all the way through to lunch. I was glad that she decided to befriend me; she was smart and bubbly and I actually liked listening to all her funny and silly commentary about everyone and everything.

After our last class, I had changed my mind about ten times about going to The Round House, but I eventually told myself that I couldn't disappoint Bobby.

"I'll come over to your place at eight," she exclaimed excitedly after our last class.

I shook my head as I walked away. "See you later."

I went over to the studio; I wanted to continue my painting project but I when I walked in, I wasn't feeling inspired. I couldn't get that stupid smile from Chase off my mind. I would have to do something about that, I was not going to be another spider he caught in his web and devoured.

I walked back to my room and when I approached the door there were two red and black cards hanging on a silver chain. I took it off and stared at it. It said, **VIP guest of The Round House**. How in the world was I going to get this man off my mind if he popped up everywhere?

I made myself something to eat and went through my notes of the day. I was not as smart as Aaron and I always had to work much harder than he did. It was my artistic side that got me into WRC, more than my analytical thinking.

My phone buzzing in my bag made me look up at the time. It was already six o' clock. Bobby's name was on the screen with a message, _hey I hope you getting ready :)_ it said.

I chuckled, for someone who only knew me for a few days she sure knew me well. It was a bit creepy how observant she was.

I texted her a thumbs up and went into my room. I didn't have much clothes in my cupboard, I would need to go shopping now that it was getting colder. An expedition I was not looking forward to, maybe I would ask Bobby to go with me. She was always so stylishly dressed, although I would never be able to pull off one of her ethnic looks. I eventually settled on black jeans, a low cut red t-shirt which hugged me snuggly and I threw on a black biker jacket. I put on a pair of tan cowboy boots and after contemplating whether or not I should wear any makeup, which I wasn't really a fan of, I pulled a natural shade of lipstick over my lips.

Bobby called from behind the door at exactly eight 'o clock.

"Don't they knock where you come from," I chuckled as I opened the door. She pulled me out into the carpeted hallway.

"Come on," she said excitedly, "I don't want to miss anything."

I laughed as I ran in to get my purse and locked the door.

We walked around my side of the building, through a small swinging gate and down a natural pathway toward The Round House. It was quite a distance away from campus and as we walked deeper into the woods I imagined how creepy it would become later in the evening. When we arrived there, I realized why it was called the round house and was surprised that I hadn't seen it before. It was literally round with a pointed thatched roof and it was certainly the biggest 'house' I had ever seen. There was a long line of people already waiting to go in at the heavy wooden door. A muscular bouncer, with long blond curls was standing at the door, sending in groups of people and telling others to wait.

"Wow that is a long line, B. I think we might miss the first few songs."

"What, did you forget the passes?" she almost shouted.

"No, they're here," I told her as I took it out.

"Then let's go," she said as she grabbed my arm, "we are VIP honey. No waiting in line for us tonight."

"Bobby, are you sure?" I whispered as she pulled me right in front of the doorman and flipped him the passes.

"I'm sure," she said through gritted teeth.

He called for someone and a girl with the highest stilettos I had ever seen and a short black dress escorted us to a booth close to the stage. The booth was built in a semi-circle and had a high back rest with very soft, red leather seats. I looked around at the place; there was a wooden bar right next to us and tables on the other side of the room with a dance floor in the middle. Some of the seats were made from hay, causing it to look like a well-furnished barn.

"I'm going to get some drinks," Bobby said, leaving before I could tell her I wasn't much of a drinker. She came back with two very tall glass of something red and icy.

"Thanks but I'm not much of the drinking type," I said as she slid in next to me.

"There isn't much alcohol in it," she said as she took a cherry out her glass and popped it into her mouth. "And besides you need to relax, you have been fidgeting since we came here."

I took a mouthful and found the taste quite appealing to my pallet. It tasted like strawberries and vodka. I only knew it was vodka because Aaron and I once stole some of my dad's and went to drink it at the back of our house by the lake. Although we were pretty drunk, I had the distinct memory of almost telling him how I felt before he passed out.

About a half an hour and two drinks later, the room went completely dark and the same woman from earlier walked on the stage, a light shining on her. In a silky voice, she announced over the screaming crowd, "Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we have a special treat for you. These gorgeous beasts have been teasing us for months and now, finally, I give you The Bleeding Hearts!"

The lights went off again followed by even louder cheering.

There was a slow strumming of an electric guitar on the dark stage and everyone went quiet. I could hear that the guitarist was a professional and he teased the crowd for a long time before the lights burst onto the stage again. It almost blinded me and when I looked up, I saw who it was that was playing the guitar. Time stood still when I saw him. It was Chase. He was the one drawing his long fingers down the strings, playing like he had been doing it for a hundred years. He looked up and stared straight into my eyes. I tried to hide how shocked I felt but I was pretty sure that I was failing.

"Wow, Grace," Bobby was whispering in my ear, "did you know?"

I shook my head slowly as I watched him, not taking my eyes off him for a moment. Not only did he look amazing in his off-cut black t-shirt and tight leather pants, he sounded amazing too; his playing was effortless and flawless. When I recovered from the shock, I looked at the rest of the band. Sebastian, his roommate, was sitting close to him, he was playing the drums. There was a pianist who I vaguely remembered from Chase's party. And just when I thought I couldn't be more swept away, Chase opened his mouth and a low growling voice came from deep within his stomach. It was beautiful and thrilling.

I sat enthralled, convincing myself that I needed to avoid eye contact with him but failing hopelessly, since he seemed to have his eyes glued to me. After a few songs, they stopped and the rhythm of my heart started beating normally again. The girl with the little black dress came striding onto the stage for the second time, her heels clicking on the wooden stage.

"As you all know it is that time of the night when we draw a name out of the hat to see who will come up on stage with these guys," she spoke into the microphone.

"I heard about this," Bobby said leaning closer to me, "people put their names on a list up in front and if your name is chosen you get to do a song with them."

"That's sounds terrifying," I said as they read out a name and a girl came screaming onto the stage.

"Yeah," Bobby said, "and if they suck, everyone boos them off stage."

I watched as Chase confidently strolled toward the excited brown haired girl and put the microphone to his lips. "So what we singing tonight sweetheart?" he asked.

She giggled as she whispered something in his ear.

I suddenly felt like I was about to throw up. "I'm going to the bathroom," I told Bobby.

"What? Now? You going to miss the last song."

"I'll be right back," I said and dashed to the bathroom.

I walked into the tiny white bathroom and leaned on the basin. "What is going on with you, Grace? You need to get a grip," I told myself in the mirror.

I splashed water on my face and after I pulled myself together, I squeezed past the people standing in the doorway and walked back to the booth. As I approached I saw Chase sitting on my seat, he was laughing at something Sebastian said. I stopped for a moment and watched him; he was even more mysterious to me than he was yesterday. He looked up and caught me staring. I blushed, causing him to smile. I walked toward him with my head lowered and he moved up when I stood next to the booth.

"Have a seat here, Grace," he said. I sat down next to him, trying hard to keep a bit of space between us.

"Grace, I was just telling the guys how amazing they sounded," Bobby said in a weird high-pitched voice, which I assumed was her way of hiding her excitement to seem cool.

I turned to my right and looked straight into Chase's expectant brown eyes. "Yeah, you guys were mind blowing," I said.

Chase closed the space between us and put his lips to my ear; his breath was warm against my skin. "I'm glad you liked it," he whispered.

My breath hitched and I cleared my throat. "I did, you were amazing," I said candidly.

He smiled before he looked to his bandmates. "Guys, you have already met my dear friend, Grace." I was suspicious about the way he said _dear friend_ , "And that is Bobby," he finished.

"Hi," Bobby smiled.

"Bobby, this is Dean and Sebastian, who Grace already met."

"Nice to meet you," Bobby said.

"You must be very special, because we have never seen Chase have an actual friend who is a girl, Sebastian snickered.

"Cut it out will you," Chase warned him.

He threw his hands in the air, "just kidding, bro!"

A few minutes later, Miss short skirt was at our table again. "Chase," she said, "there are a few fans who want to talk to you."

"I'll be right back, don't go anywhere," he told me. I moved out so that he could join a group of girls who could easily be Victoria's Secret models with their long legs and exposed stomachs that were so flat they look like they were steam rolled. They circled him like prey, touching his arm and his chest, each one trying to get his attention, which was truly sickening to watch. How women in this day and age could be so desperate was beyond me. When a leggy blonde pulled him by the arm and onto the dance floor I was ready to leave.

"Hey, Bobby," I said, hating to pull her away from the obvious intimate conversation she was having with Dean. "I'm ready to go."

"You sure?" she asked through clenched teeth.

"Yes, but you should stay, it's still really early, I am just feeling so tired."

"It's cool, we can go," she said.

"You stay," Sebastian told Bobby, "I will walk Grace home, besides she lives right next door to me."

"You okay with that, Grace?" She gave me an intense stare indicating that she would go with me if I needed her to. But I didn't want to spoil her evening because of my own stupid issues.

"Yes, of course it's fine, and Sebastian thanks for offering, but I am fine walking back on my own."

"It's a dark path, Grace, you can't go alone and I don't mind."

"Either he goes with you or I do," Bobby scolded.

"Okay fine, thank you, Sebastian I would appreciate that."

"See you tomorrow," I told Bobby.

I chanced a quick glance over at Chase who was too involved with all the girls he was with to notice me leaving. I angrily snatched my jacket and dashed out by the door. I heard someone jog up behind me.

"Whoa, Grace," Sebastian said. "Wait up."

"Oh, umm, I'm sorry. It's just a bit chilly," I lied.

"Here you go," he said, throwing a heavy black leather jacket over my own jacket. "That should help."

"Thanks," I said nervously, not sure what to make of our little stroll.

We walked in awkward silence for a while until Sebastian broke it.

"So where are you from, Grace?"

"I'm from a small town called Rosewood," I answered.

"Oh, really?" he raised an eyebrow. "So you already knew Chase before you came here then?"

"Funnily enough, no. I knew of him but I never actually met him. I kept a low profile and we didn't have any classes together. In our final year, he dropped out of school."

"Oh, yeah, the juvi gig he did," Sebastian said as he ran his hands through his hair.

Sebastian asked me some more questions and it was mostly a one-sided conversation. I had to think really hard before I answered each one of them. My life was a deep, dark pit of secrets and I intended on keeping it that way while I was at college. In fact, I wanted to leave it behind me forever.

"You are really mysterious," Sebastian said when he realized I was being vague.

"I'm just not that interesting," I retorted. I was relieved when we arrived at our building. "Thanks for walking me, Sebastian."

"I would never pass up the opportunity to walk a beautiful lady home," he smiled. "See you around, Grace."

I didn't know what to say to that so I just turned around and went to my room, forgetting to give his jacket back to him. "What the heck was that all about," I said loudly as I put the keys on the counter. I put his jacket on the sofa; it smelled like fresh linen. I slipped on sleeping shorts and a t-shirt and climbed into bed. I wished Aaron was there tonight so I could talk to him about all that happened. But I knew that willing him to come would not make him appear, so I looked at the dark ceiling until my eyelids grew heavy and I fell asleep.

I was awoken by a loud thumping on my door. I looked at the time on my phone next to my bed. It was only three in the morning.

"Grace, open up," I heard Chase's voice on the other side of the door.

I ran to open it, thinking that something was wrong. "Is everything okay?" I asked as I swung the door open.

He looked like he lost his words for a minute and then walked inside.

"Are you okay?" he asked me almost angrily now.

"Yes, I am fine," I said unsure of what was happening. "What is up with you, Chase?"

His eyes fell on the leather jacket on my sofa and shot back to me. "You went home with Sebastian and I just thought... I just wanted to make sure that you are okay, that's all."

I laughed insincerely. "What? So, you thought I behaved like one of those floozies you spent the entire evening with? That I brought Sebastian home and what? Spread eagled for him!"

"I didn't mean to... I'm sorry, Grace, that's not what I meant."

"It's three o' clock in the morning, Chase, you're only getting home now and you don't see me questioning you about your eventful evening. Or would you like to sit down and tell me who you screwed tonight?"

He had a wounded look on his face but said nothing which answered all of my questions and made feel even angrier.

"You don't know me, Chase, and I don't need your protection or whatever this is. Now please leave."

I walked to the door and held it open. He walked out with his head hung and then I heard his front door slamming closed and him and Sebastian getting into an argument. I couldn't hear what they were saying so I pushed my ear against the wall in my bedroom. "Just stay the fuck away from her," I heard him tell Sebastian which followed a loud noise coming from his stereo.
Chapter 5

I was sleep walking through the day on Friday; I didn't get any sleep after what happened with Chase and at lunch time the ever-observant Bobby noticed something was up. "Grace, are you okay? You've been looking weird today."

"I'm feeling a bit sick, that's all."

She ignored that lie and moved her chair closer to me. "Is something going on with you and Chase that I don't know?" she asked. "I saw you ignoring him today."

I shook my head.

"Grace," she said as placed her hand over mine, "I am your only friend here and you're mine, so I think it would suit us best if we were open about things."

I kept quiet and put my head in my hands. I didn't know how to explain to Bobby what was going on, since I didn't know what was happening between Chase and me either.

"Okay, I'll start," she said. "I kissed Dean last night and it got pretty heated and now I'm not sure how to look him in the eye. I promised myself that I would not get into a relationship in college."

"Why not?" I asked, surprised at her revelation and momentarily forgetting my own issues.

"I'm just not a relationship type of girl, I had a serious boyfriend back home. He was a jerk and I said that I'd never again invest so much time in a guy."

She looked at me expectantly.

I sighed, "I don't know what's going on," I told her honestly. "He came to my room last night angry because Sebastian walked me home, even though he was probably out with some or all of those women," I said disgusted.

"What? Why would he do that?" she widened her eyes.

"I have no idea, it was so weird. He was the one that made it clear that we are just friends and I agreed or maybe it was the other way around but whatever, he has no right."

"I'm sorry to say it, Grace, but guys like that are usually bad news, just be careful."

"Thanks, but there is no need, I intend on staying far away from that."

"It's a good thing he's coming this way," Bobby snorted, "because I would love to smack him upside his head right now." I watched Bobby's eyes follow him to the table. I didn't look up, although I could smell him standing next to me.

"Hey, Bob, can I talk to Grace for a quick second?" Chase asked.

She didn't budge or answer him.

"It's okay," I told Bobby.

"I'm watching you, Chase," Bobby grunted as she got up and brushed pass him. I felt a bit more empowered having a girlfriend like her.

"Grace, can we do this somewhere else?"

"You know what, Chase, it's fine. You obviously had too much to drink last night. So, let's just let it go."

"I wasn't drunk, Grace, I don't drink."

"A college boy not drinking, that is unbelievably shocking," I retorted.

"I have my reasons," he said. "So, will you give me that moment?"

I looked at the black watch on my wrist, "I have to go and I said it's all good." I got up, grabbed my back pack and walked away.

"Fuck!" I heard him say, then bang something on the metal table. But I didn't care, I made up my mind last night. Chase was everything I had hoped he wasn't and I wasn't making that mistake again.

After our last class, I told Bobby that I wanted to spend the night alone and she agreed but said we were going out Saturday.

I walked straight to the studio after class; I needed to paint. When I walked in, Aaron was sitting up against the wall and I nearly burst into tears when I saw him smiling up at me. I pulled the brown rug next to him and sat down.

"Having a bad day?" he asked.

I sighed, "yeah I guess you could say so."

"Want to talk about it?"

"Not really..."

We sat quiet for a long time until I got up, picked up my paintbrush and put a blank canvas on the easel.

"Everything is just so hard without you, Aaron," I murmured as I started painting. "Starting a life, doing life without you is hard. I feel lost in this world without you," I said as a stubborn tear ran down my cheek.

He came to stand next to me. "Tell me what's been bothering you"?

"I can't," I shook my head. "It doesn't feel right, speaking about those things to you. I mean I know you're not really here, it's just me but..."

" _I am here, Gracy and you can tell me,"_ he said in a familiar gentle voice that made me feel safe.

I continued dipping the paint brush and stroking it on the canvas. "There is this guy, Chase. I don't know, I think I might like him or I am not sure exactly what I feel. When he is around me, I feel strange, like the way I used to feel when we were together. But I know his end game and I know I am going to be left hurt. He's the use 'em and lose 'em type and I can't deal with losing another person I care about. I mean he's been a great friend these past few weeks, but every time I am with him, I feel like I want more."

"Grace, you know what I have always loved about you? You are wise beyond your years. I have never had a problem that you couldn't fix."

"You didn't have real problems," I choked out a laugh.

He smiled, "well you had very real problems and you always solved them yourself, even though you were too young to deal with everything life threw at you. And I have no doubt that as always you already know what to do."

I rolled my eyes at him. "You have been no, and I mean no help at all."

"You'll be fine, Gracy, just trust your gut, it has never let you down and if you're still unsure it looks like you have already painted the answer," and then he disappeared.

I sighed wishing he would stay longer and stepped back to look at the painting and what Aaron was talking about. I looked at it, shocked at what it was portraying. An array of dark colors covered the canvas almost completely, but out of the darkness was a bright red sun bursting forth.

I cupped my face in my hands, wanting to ignore the hidden meaning behind it. Knowing that it was a representation of how I pictured my life to be and that stupid red sun was a boy who I wanted so desperately to get out of my life. That sun was my light in this world of darkness. And if there was one thing I learned since the day I started putting paint to canvas, was that paintings never lied.

I didn't hear the door creak open as I stared at the painting and my heart nearly jumped out of my chest when I heard someone clearing their throat.

I looked around and saw Chase with his hand in his blue jeans. "I'm sorry to interrupt you," he told me, "but I really need to talk to you."

I quickly took the painting off and put it behind an old bookshelf as if Chase would see right through it.

"What do you want, Chase?" I asked bluntly.

"I just... I'm really sorry about last night, you're right, it wasn't my place." He bridged the gap between us and stood close enough to me to make my heart flutter. "It's just that Sebastian has a bad rep with girls and I didn't want him to take advantage of you."

"And I suppose you have a clean track record, when it comes to girls?" I snapped.

"Grace, I just want you to be safe that's all."

"And why is it that you feel the need to protect me?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said honestly.

"You really don't need to worry about me, Chase, I am fine and I have been since before you came into my life."

"I know, I'm sorry Grace and I don't want to ruin what we have, I mean our friendship."

"Oh yes, our friendship," I muttered.

"Please, don't walk away from me, I know I screwed up. Just give me another chance."

My heart ached as I observed his face; he seemed so vulnerable. Like a man haunted by his own demons.

"Please, let me make it up to you?"

"And how do you plan to do that?"

He thought for a moment. "Let me cook something for us, tonight at your place."

"You cook?" I raised a brow, "seriously?"

He grinned. "I will even try my best not to burn it."

I laughed. "Fine, I hope I don't die of food poisoning or choke on it."

"Don't worry I know CPR," Chase said.

I laughed again as I locked the door. "Rather let me die than put your lips on mine," I teased.

He didn't laugh or say anything to that and we walked in silence back to our building.

"I will be right back, let me get all the ingredients," he said as he walked off to his room.

He came back with a brown paper bag filled to the brim with ingredients and a bottle of red wine. "I thought you don't drink," I eyed him skeptically. "I don't," he said as he lifted the bags onto the counter, "this is for you, apparently it is the perfect pairing to a great pasta dish."

"Assuming that it will be great," I teased.

"You'll just have to wait and see," he told me as he took out the pasta and put it in a pot.

"Do you need some help?" I asked from the sofa.

"You just sit there and let me do all the hard work."

Twenty minutes later, my stomach started grumbling, aroused by the amazing aroma creeping up my nostrils. "So how are you finding college life?" Chase asked with a dish towel draped over his muscular shoulder.

I shrugged. "It's okay, still getting into the swing of things."

"That's because you spend most of your time cooped up in the place or in that dingy studio, you need to get out more."

"You sound like someone I know," I told him.

"And who would that be?"

"An old friend of mine... How far is that food, it smells delicious," I said changing the subject.

"Nearly done," he said as he walked over to me and sat down next to me on the gray sofa. "Just give it some time to stew."

"So where did you learn to cook?" I asked as I sipped the wine he poured me.

"I cooked at home sometimes for my mom, she wasn't too good at it and we needed to eat. So, I picked up some books from the library and it just became my chore, I guess. Although I must admit, I enjoyed it much more than I expected." He smiled as if he was reminded of something pleasant in that memory, and then his expression suddenly changed to something unreadable as he pressed his lips together in a hard line.

"So how about you?" he asked as he turned his entire body toward me and lifted his left leg onto the sofa, bending it sideways.

"Nothing much to tell," I said looking down at my feet, "pretty boring life."

"Now somehow, I find that unbelievable," he raised his brow. "Tell me what your life was like in our home town. How come I never saw you around?"

"I kept to myself mostly, I had a lot of things to do at home and I never really had a chance to hang out with you cool kids," I smirked.

"You didn't miss much," he said standing up and removing the food from the stove. "Where do you keep the plates?"

"Bottom drawer, under the sink, left side."

He took out the plates and dished a chunk of food onto each one. He pulled out a chair and motioned for me to sit down.

When I sat down on the black barstool, I took a forkful of the creamy pasta he had made and it was even more delicious than it looked.

"I can't believe you actually made this amazing dish; I don't think I have eaten anything better."

"That's really sad, Grace." He looked up at me. "You really should get out more."

I chuckled. "Maybe it's the wine, it really is perfectly paired with this food. Thank you, this is beyond amazing."

"Anytime," he winked.

"So you never told me what your issue is with Sebastian, I mean I assumed since you two are in a band together and his your roommate, you at least liked the guy."

"Don't get me wrong," he said, "Sebastian is a great friend. But he's... a bad boyfriend... a real lady-killer."

"Peas in a pod," I retorted.

"No, he's actually worse than I am," he snorted.

I actually flinched at the thought of Chase being with other women.

"Like I said, it's just that I care about you and fair warning as a friend, you should stay away from him."

"Warning noted," I said as I suddenly lost my appetite.

"By the way, he said. "The band is playing at The Round House tomorrow evening again, you and Bobby should come."

"I think I will give it a miss, not really my scene."

"I thought you liked The Bleeding Hearts?"

"I loved them, they were amazing. You were amazing but I just don't fit in with that crowd."

"You think I'm amazing?" he grinned.

"I think you're amazing in the band."

"Is that all?" he pouted.

I burst out in laughter at how silly he looked with his bottom lip stuck out. "Actually, you're a pretty decent friend too," I admitted.

"So I'm forgiven then?" he asked.

"Completely absolved of all your transgressions," I retorted.

"Then my work here is done but if you change your mind, please come. We've signed a contract with the college to sing there every second Saturday and I am sure Dean would love to see more of Bobby."

I sighed at that, "I wouldn't get my hopes up if I were Dean. Bobby is not the relationship type."

"Would you look at that," he chuckled, "Bobby the man slayer! Who would've thought?"

He checked his watch, "I have to get going. The band is rehearsing in a few minutes, but if you're still up later I will come around to say goodnight." He stood up and I walked toward him and gave him a swift peck on his cheek.

He stood still for a moment and looked at me surprised. "What was that for?"

"For a great meal and for proving that you are a really great friend by apologizing and wanting to make things right." I turned around and started packing the dishes in the sink.

He stood in the kitchen for a while, I could feel his eyes on my back and then he left without saying goodbye.

When I thought about it afterward, I realized that I had crossed a line. Yes, Chase and I agreed that we would be friends but kisses, even the friendliest ones, would not work with us. I knew it before I even did it and yet I still wanted too.

***

I was sitting on my bed strumming my guitar when my phone rang. When I picked it up, and saw my dad's name flashing on the screen, my heart started to flutter. We hadn't spoken in months, being on a ship made it very difficult for him to call me, there was always a problem with the signal and he could only call me on his time off. So the only thing I had seen from him recently were a few text messages to let me know that he was okay and that he missed me.

"Dad!" I half screamed when I answered.

"Hey, baby," he said, sounding more relieved than me. "I miss you so much, how are you?"

"I'm great, I miss you too. When are you coming home again?" I asked him.

"That's one of the reasons I am calling, baby, the captain has redirected the ship because of some piracy issues so we might be here a little bit longer." My heart sank hearing that and then there was a pause, a very long pause before he spoke again.

"Grace, are you still there?"

"Yes, I'm here."

I could hear him sighing over the phone. "Grace, I don't have much time we might lose the signal again at any moment. There is another reason why I needed to call you. I... umm..." He cleared his throat. "I received a text from your mother." I think my heart literally stopped beating then.

"What does she want?" I snapped.

"She umm... she wants to sell the house, our house, and split the profit, she said she needs the money."

"But that's not fair," I shouted. "She decided that she would leave us the house if you took care of me."

"I know, baby, but there was no written agreement."

He sounded tired and I felt bad for taking it out on him. I softened my tone, "So what are we going to do?" I asked.

"I told her I would speak to you, but it looks like we're going to have to take that option. I can't get back in time to fight her and if there is a court date and I don't show, she might walk away with everything."

"Dad, you can't, we can't let her get away with this, isn't there anything I can do?"

"I don't want you to get involved, I am going to ask Agatha and Chris if you can stay with her in the meantime and I will get myself a rented place until we can get back on our feet."

"What, no," I cried, "we're not moving from that house." I thought of all the hours, days my Dad and Aaron and I spent fixing that place to what it is today and I was not prepared to let that low life of a woman have it.

"Dad, tell her to meet me next week Saturday, I will sort it out."

"Grace, I don't want you to see her, I don't want you to be in the position to be hurt by that woman ever again."

"I will be fine, Dad. I have put up with her crap for years, and another day won't hurt me—she won't hurt me ever again. I will take Agatha and Chris with me if you want, but she is not getting a piece of our house."

"Grace, please listen to me..."

"Dad, you're breaking up, Dad, can you hear me?"

I could hear him very well and he probably knew I was lying, but I wasn't going to allow him to convince me not to this. She would not win this time.

I sent my dad a text to let him know where she could meet me. When the anger died down and I processed what was about to happen, the fear of seeing her took hold of me and I broke down.

When I calmed down, I realized that I wasn't sure if I was ready to see her, but I needed to do this for my dad...for me. I needed to speak to Aaron, he would know what to do. I called him softly and then waited but nothing, I called a bit louder this time but still nothing. I went into my room and picked up my guitar and started strumming, maybe that would bring him to me, like the last time. But a few songs later he still didn't show. I continued with one of my favorite songs, Radiohead's _Creep_ and stopped halfway through, frustrated.

"Please don't stop," I heard a voice behind me and I quickly turned around to a wide-eyed Chase staring at me. "How long have you been standing there?" I asked him embarrassed.

"Not long enough," he whispered... "I thought you couldn't really play."

"I can't," I said still trying to keep up that pretense.

"It sure didn't sound like that to me; you sounded unbelievably amazing from the little I heard."

"I'm not that good," I said brushing passing him, angry that he wasn't Aaron. "I'm really not in the mood to talk, so if you could please leave."

"Grace," he touched my arm, "don't push me away."

I took a deep breath, "I'm fine," I lied unconvincingly.

He looked at me intently. "Clearly, you're not, so what is up? I am not leaving you looking like this."

I turned to look in the mirror, not sure what he was referring to and then I saw how red and puffy my eyes were.

"I... I don't know what to tell you," I said frankly.

"Just start with what's bothering you."

"That's the thing," I exhaled, "it's complicated."

"I'm used to complicated," he said guiding me to the sofa.

I went to sit down, wringing my hands together.

I took a deep breath and then decided I couldn't tell him and shook my head. "I can't," I said as the tears rolled down my cheeks.

"Grace, please let me in, you can trust me."

I looked up into his brown eyes and saw the same thing I once saw in Aaron's eyes. He really did care about me, but how far could I let him in, I didn't know him as well as I knew Aaron.

Chase said nothing; he put my hands in his and waited.

"My mother left me and my dad when I was really young, about fifteen. Actually my dad threw her out because she did some really horrible things and now she is coming back and I need to go see her."

"Why exactly did he throw her out, why would she leave you?"

"She..." I shook my head, not sure if I was ready to tell someone else what I had been through."

He moved closer to me and wrapped his arms around me and it stilled my shaking, terrified body.

After a few minutes, I moved out of his grasp and wiped away my tears. "The job she had lead her into drug use and when she could barely work anymore, she dragged me into it and made me do things that a kid my age shouldn't be doing."

His eyes went wide. "Shit, Grace, I'm sorry."

"No, I mean it wasn't like that," I said when I understood what he thought. "She just made me work late hours and I would miss school because I was exhausted. I nearly failed until a friend helped me out. The worst part was when I would watch her shoot up and then have to get her home without any money because she spent every cent we made. I spent my childhood working to feed her habit and fighting off men. My dad worked away at sea, so he never knew what was happening. But I eventually told him and he threw her out. She told my dad that she wants to come back and sell the house; she obviously needs the money to feed her habit."

My tears started building behind my eyes again and Chase moved even closer.

"My dad can't come home and I just can't let her take everything the two of us built and my dad can't afford to buy another house, he will have nowhere to go."

"So, what are you going to do?" Chase asked

I stood up and went to stand at the window. "I am going to see her and see if I can talk some sense into her, but I know that it won't go down like that."

"When are you going?" he asked.

"I am driving down next weekend."

"Well, you're not going alone, I am going with you.

"You don't have to do that, Chase, really."

"I'm not discussing this, Grace, I am going with you."

"Thank you," I murmured. Now that Aaron wasn't here to make sure that my mother didn't manipulate me, I knew I needed someone with me. I thought of all the times Aaron told me to tell my dad and I just never could. She was my mother and I knew that my dad would kick her out and she would have nowhere to go. But he eventually gave me an ultimatum when he couldn't stand what my mother was doing to me. He said either I told my dad or he would.

Chase held me against his warm body. "Don't worry, Grace. I won't let her hurt you this time," he said.
Chapter 6

My stomach was literally turning for the rest of the week, I felt sick and I couldn't eat anything. I wasn't sure if I could face her, the drug addicted woman I used to call mother.

Chase came over every night and stayed late, I wasn't really sure why he would do this for me but I was glad to have him there. The night before we were to leave, he came over with a pizza and demanded that I eat it and I obliged.

"Grace, you need to stop worrying, we will be in and out of there. Sort it out as quickly as possible."

"Why are you doing this?" I eventually asked him. "I mean, you barely even know me. All you know about me is that I am a product of a drug addicted mother and a father who I barely see."

"Grace, what I see when I look at you, is a beautiful girl with a pure heart. A girl who has offered all of herself to others and has yet to receive what she deserves in return. Most people our age are so self-absorbed; but not you. I need some of your goodness to rub off on me. That's why I stick around," he smiled.

A tear rolled down my face, I couldn't believe that he saw that in me, even though I felt like a mess. "Thank you," I mumbled.

"It's the truth," he said as he took his thumb and wiped my tear away.

He stood up and kissed my cheek. "Now get some sleep, we leave early in the morning."

Chase was knocking at my door at the crack of dawn, but I was already up. I hadn't gotten a wink of sleep that night. He loaded our bags in his blue hatchback Ford and we took the drive home. The drive was quiet, Chase played some music from his MP3 and I realized we had the same taste in music. When we finally arrived at my house, I stared at the brick wall and decided that we arrived there too quickly. I wanted to throw up.

"So this is where you live," Chase said as he stretched outside. "It's strange that I live only ten minutes away and we never bumped heads."

"Too many girls in your way," I smiled.

Again, I received the serious look to my joke.

"Let's go inside," I said as I walked toward the old wooden door, which I thought I should perhaps give a coat of varnish before I went home on Sunday.

When I opened the door, the dusty smell of the uninhabited space hit me and I opened every window.

Chase walked in with bags draped over his shoulders. "Where do I put these?"

"You can leave mine there, thanks, and you can take yours to the spare room which is at the bottom of the foyer." He walked down the long passage to the room and I went into mine which was right next to his.

I stared at the empty white walls in my bedroom. The day Aaron died; I went home and ripped all the pictures off the wall. I was angry with him, I was angry with myself and now looking at the empty space, I missed it. I walked out of the room and Chase was staring at my paintings.

"These are really good," he said when he saw me.

"Thanks," I smiled. "If you want to go home for a while since we're here, I wouldn't mind," I told him.

"Nah," he shook his head. "I doubt that anyone is at home, although I might just slip away this evening to get a few things there."

"Sure." I smiled. "Let me make us something to eat. I'm not sure what we're going to do until tomorrow, maybe a movie?" I offered. "I have plenty of old ones in the cabinet below the TV."

"I'll check for one," he said.

I went into the kitchen and decided I was not in the right frame of mind to cook. Chase walked in while I was staring at the bare kitchen cupboard.

"Need some help?" he asked.

"Actually, I forgot that this house has been empty for over a year, so there is obviously no food."

"A year?" he asked. "You only moved to WRC a few months ago."

"It's complicated," I told him and I really didn't want to get into it right now. "I am going to order some Chinese, is that okay?"

"Sounds good," he nodded. "We can always go to the Chinese place in town if you prefer?"

I didn't, I knew that if I went out I might run into Agatha or Chris.

"I think I would rather stay here, if you don't mind."

"Not at all," he smiled.

I went to get my phone, and ordered Chinese from my favorite restaurant and went to join Chase on the old blue sofa. I was a ball of nerves and I was sure that Chase could sense it, but he didn't say anything.

When the doorbell rang he stood up and paid for the food. We ate in silence while watching a black and white movie Chase had chosen and halfway through, I stood up.

"I think I need to get to bed, it's going to be a long day tomorrow. I want to go see her as early as possible, so that we can get this over with."

Chase reached over and put my hands in his. "It's going to be fine Grace, you'll see. Get some rest okay?"

"Thanks," I tried to smile.

"Goodnight Grace."

I went to my room and crawled into bed. I lay awake for hours listening to the muffled sounds of the TV and then I heard it click off and Chase walking past my room. I didn't know how long after that it took me to fall asleep, but when I did I saw her standing in front of me and I was once again that vulnerable little girl. She was pulling me away from my dad and I was screaming. I woke up to Chase shaking me.

"Grace! Grace! It's only a dream," his husky voice stilled my shaky limbs.

I looked away from him, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to wake you, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," he told me as he brushed his hand over my arm. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I shook my head.

He got in beside me without invitation and we lay there silently and I felt a wave of sadness wash over me, because it reminded me of Aaron who used to do the same thing. I wanted to tell him to leave, I didn't know him well enough to be this vulnerable, but I couldn't. Him being there calmed me and eventually my breathing evened out and I fell asleep.

I woke up the next morning to the smell of coffee drifting into my nostrils.

"You're up," Chase said as he walked in with a cup of coffee in his hand and gave it to me.

"Thanks," I said sitting up and quickly pulling my disheveled hair into a bun. "What time is it?"

"Six," he told me.

I looked outside my window and noticed it was still dark outside, it was time. After I got dressed, I gulped down half of the coffee and refused the toast Chase offered me.

We drove to the harbor where I arranged for me and Cherry to meet. Chase pulled into the parking lot and we got out. It was still early and there wasn't a soul in site. That was the way Cherry preferred it, she was not well liked in these parts. She caused all sorts of trouble with the locals when she was high on drugs. I looked around to see where she was and then I saw her standing among the rocks, overlooking the water. Her auburn hair was loose and blowing in the breeze. I turned to Chase, "I think I should speak to her alone."

"You sure?" he asked.

I nodded and walked toward her. I could feel my heart beating in my chest and for a moment I considered turning around and running away. "Just get it over with Grace," I mumbled to myself.

She turned around when she heard me coming. She almost looked normal in her fitted black jeans and black jacket. Except, she had dark rings under her eyes, which was a sure sign that she was shooting up all night.

"Baby," she smiled when she saw me and my stomach started turning again. She wrapped her arms around me but I didn't do the same and when I felt it went on for longer than it should have, I pulled out of her arms.

"What do you want, Cherry?" I asked her.

"What? No _hi, Mom_ , how have you been?"

"Cut the bullshit, Cherry, you're wasting my time. Now what do you want?"

She started fidgeting with her nose. "I told you I need half of the money for the house."

"You're a real piece of work, you know that?" I seethed.

"Look, I have the right to half of that house your dad and I bought it together," she told me.

"The hell you do!" I half shouted at her. "You have never been there for me or Dad, you threw away your responsibility and the only good thing you ever did was leaving us that house and getting far away from us."

"Look, baby, if it means so much to you I have a proposition for you."

I stepped back and snorted. "I knew you wanted something else. So what is it huh, spit it out!"

"Well.... There is a big show happening tomorrow night, right here in our little town. They gave the Vive theatre a face lift and some big shot producer called me up to sing a few songs. He is offering me a good sum of money for it. So what do you say, wanna do a few songs for your mom for old times' sake?"

"You are unbelievable, you know that," I said through my teeth.

"Oh come on baby, remember all the good times we had together?"

She put her hand to my face and I slapped it away.

"You are a monster," I told her trying to hold back the tears, and before I completely lost it Chase was beside me.

"Grace," he said pulling me against him, "are you okay?"

My others eyes snapped toward Chase. "I don't think we have met," my mother told Chase in a sickening seductive voice. "I'm Cherry," she held out her hand. He looked at her and I could see his eyes widening when he recognized who she was. I was hoping he wouldn't, but who was I fooling. My mother was a legendary guitar player and singer. But if he was star struck he never showed it. He turned to me instead, "Grace are you ready to go?"

I nodded.

We walked away and I heard my mother shouting. "The show starts at seven tonight Grace, either you do this or you give me what's mine."
Chapter 7

When Chase and I got home I went straight to my room and slammed the door. I needed to think.

Chase gave me a few minutes before he walked in.

"Grace, what was that all about?"

"It's nothing," I said as I wiped away my tears. "I think you should go home, thanks for coming here with me and everything you did, but I need to do the rest on my own."

"I'm not going anywhere," he raised his voice slightly "and I have been keeping quiet long enough. I want you to tell me right now what shit your mother wants you to be involved in."

I sat down. The air felt like it was escaping from the room. I let Chase in too deep and now I couldn't let him go. I took several deep breaths. She wants me to perform tonight at The Vive theatre.

"Perform?" he asked.

I went quiet.

Chase waited.

"I told you my mom let me do some things when I was growing up. It started with me performing with her. When I got older, about sixteen, she became too washed up to perform and then she let me pretend I was her. I would go on stage every night and at first only her groupies noticed, but she forced me to spend time perfecting my makeup and walking on high heels. A few months later, nobody could tell us apart. I spent two years of my life pretending to be her.

"You pretended to be Cherry D?" he asked in awe.

I nodded.

He let that sink in for a minute. "So the album _Nomadic_ she did...?"

"Was all me," I sighed.

He stood staring at me with his eyes wide. "Wow, Grace, that's amazing. I mean it's really crazy considering everything, but still truly amazing."

I shrugged my shoulders, what was I supposed to say to that anyway.

Chase came to sit beside me and put his hands in mine. I'm sorry I was star struck for a second, but all things considered I really don't think that it's a good idea that you do this."

"What else can I do, Chase? I have thought about every possible way out and there isn't one. It's the only way to get her off my back. I have to do this," I sobbed.

He pulled me into his arms. "Why didn't you tell me that Cherry D was your mother?" he asked into my hair.

I pulled out of his grasp and turned away. "It didn't come up and I really wanted that part of my life to stay buried. I still do, so I really don't want you with me."

He turned me to face him, "Grace, if you think this is the only way, then I trust you are making the right decision, but I'm staying here. I am going to be by your side all the way."

I shook my head.

"Not negotiable, Grace."

"Fine," I said as I stood up "I need to make some calls, if you would please excuse me."

He walked out of my room and I shut the door. I thought about all the things I would need. I didn't have any makeup, although I looked like my mother now, more than ever. I also needed my dress dry cleaned. I opened my closet and pulled out a sequined red dress. It swept the floor and had a deep neckline. It was the only thing of hers that I kept. It reminded me of a time when I thought she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen and I was proud that she was my mother. I put the dress into a long black bag and pulled the zip up. I prayed that I didn't walk into Agatha or Chris on my way to the cleaners. I put on my black hoody, a black sweat pants and walked to the door. "I'll be right back," I told Chase.

"Where are you going?"

"I need to get this to the dry cleaners without anyone noticing," I told him.

"Why don't I take it?" Chase offered.

I thought about it for a second; he had already done so much.

"I'm here to help, Grace," he said sensing my hesitation.

"I would appreciate it," I said handing him the bag. "Please tell Mr. Marks that it needs to be done by five."

"Sure," he said as he took it from me, "I'll be back soon."

As soon as he left I called the makeup store to order my usual supply. It was a store downtown and at least they could do deliveries. I went to my room to change back into my brown dress when I saw Aaron standing by the window. He had a look of sadness in his eyes when he looked up at me.

"Aaron!" I shrieked, "what are you doing here?"

"You know what," he told me." Are you really doing this?"

"What choice do I have, Aaron?" I asked sifting through my cupboard for a pair of shoes to go with the dress I would be wearing tonight.

"You always have a choice, Gracy, don't let her continue to control your life."

"What do you want me to do? My dad and I are going to lose our house if I don't do this."

"Why don't you approach my parents?" he asked.

Of course he would say that, it was a thought that crossed my mind and was now being reiterated by a ghost I created.

"I can't, they have done too much for me. This is not their fight."

"Come on, Gracy," he begged. "This is a bad idea."

"It will be fine, I will be okay," I told him.

"Grace, I could never change your mind once you made it up, but please be careful."

"I will," I promised him.

"So what's the plan?" he asked.

"It's at the Vive, Cherry said it was a big deal."

"Which probably means trouble," Aaron huffed.

I shrugged. "I'll handle it, I always have."

He spent a long time trying to convince me not to go through with it, but like I told Chase, my mind was made up.

We were still going back and forth when I heard the front door. "I'm back, Grace," Chase called.

When I looked back at the space where Aaron was standing, he was gone.

Chase knocked on my room door. "Come in," I said.

"Are you ready for tonight?" he asked me.

I nodded.

"Mr. Marks assured me that the dress would be ready by five, so I will go pick it up then and I brought some burgers, they're in the kitchen."

I grabbed Chase's hand as he was about to walk out and a bolt of electricity coursed through me.

He turned and looked into my eyes. "I umm... just wanted to say thanks for everything."

"That's what friends are for, right?"

I smiled; disappointed that he always alluded to the fact that we were friends and nothing more.

I heard the doorbell ring and I went to answer it. My makeup had arrived. I walked with it to my room. "Are you not going to eat?" Chase asked as I walked past the kitchen.

"Let me do this first, it takes hours," I said as I shook the box.

I sat by the mirror which was next to the window, I remembered the day Aaron put it up for me. I was lying on the bed reading a book while he drilled holes in the wall.

It took me a lot longer than usual to perfect my makeup; I hadn't done it in years. But after redoing it three times, it finally came together.

Chase shouted that he was heading out to get the dress just before five and when he returned he left it outside my door.

I opened the door, picked up the dress from the stool and unzipped the black bag. I stared at it for a second and then I slipped it on. After I put my shoes on and a fake diamond necklace around my neck, I was ready.

I was talking myself into looking in the mirror when Chase walked in.

"Whoa," he said, "you look exactly like her. I mean a much better version, but still."

I turned around to look. He was right, I was almost ashamed. I looked just like the woman I spent so many years hating. And now I have to pretend to be her once again.

Chase came up behind me and gently rubbed my shoulders. "Are you going to be okay?"

I gave him a small smile. "I'll be fine, we should get going."

Chase pulled up to the back entrance of the Vive and opened the door for me. I quickly ran inside with him following close behind. I found Cherry looming in a dark corner behind the stage and she pulled me to one side when she saw me. She wore a blonde wig and over-sized glasses.

"Baby, you look beautiful," she cooed. "Thanks for doing this for me."

"I'm not doing this for you, Cherry," I said her name bitterly. It reminded me of the day she told me I wasn't to call her mother or by her birth name, Gloria.

"Look baby, Jerry is going to be here soon and he will be watching, so you have to give your best performance."

My body chilled when she said that name. Jerry was the ruthless thug producer that put my mother in hospital more than once, after she couldn't perform. He was also the one who gave my mother her first taste of the drugs she became addicted too.

"Jerry is here?" I shuddered.

"It's his show, baby."

"What the hell, Cherry? Why are you involved with Jerry?" I said shaking like a leaf.

"I owe him some money and he said that I could pay him off if I bring the house down tonight, which I have no doubt you will, baby."

"You are a lying, manipulative piece of shit, Cherry, you knew I wouldn't do this if he was involved."

"Come now, baby, don't speak to your mother like that."

Chase watched us speaking in hushed tones a few feet away. I didn't want him to know about Jerry and his goons.

"Let's just get this over with," I said through gritted teeth.

I took one last look in the mirror as I heard people chanting her name. I saw my mother retreating into the same dark corner as the sound of footsteps came near us. I looked around and my heart started pounding madly when I saw Jerry walking toward me. He was a huge man and he towered over me. His goons walking behind him weren't any smaller and they made the stage area seem a lot smaller than it was.

"Jerry, baby," I sneered, giving my best impression of my mother and lifting my chin when he stood in front of me. He said nothing as he took off his black glasses and raked his eyes over me for a few minutes.

"Something you needed, Jerry? I'm about to go on."

He shook his head and from the corner of my eye, I saw Chase moving closer.

"What the fuck is this, Grace? Where is that good for nothing mother of yours!" His voice was gruff and angry.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Jerry baby," I said trying to keep my composure.

"Stop with this game, Grace or you're next, where is that bitch!"

"I'm here," my mother said moving forward.

"You tried to pull this shit on me, Cherry, I'm going to kill you," he said as he stomped toward her and she cowered with her hand over her head.

"Wait, Jerry." I said and went to stand in front of my mother to shield her from him, even though my knees were trembling. "I can do this. I've done it for years without anyone noticing!"

Chase was next to me now. "Is everything okay, Grace?"

"Yeah, fine," I said, "please just stay out of it."

"You have yourself a bodyguard here," Jerry laughed insincerely.

"You better not touch her," Chase warned.

He laughed louder. "And I suppose you are going to stop me?" he taunted him.

I put my hand on Chase's and moved him to one side. "Chase, these guys they... Please just don't say anything."

"Who are these people, Grace?"

"I will explain everything later, please just trust me," I said now close to tears because I knew Jerry would kill Chase in a heartbeat.

I walked back to Jerry. "So are you going to let me go on or cancel this show because she sure as hell can't sing."

"You had better pull this off, Grace or you can dig two graves, maybe three," he said motioning to Chase.

I swallowed nervously.

And then I heard her name being announced. "And now ladies and gentlemen, the moment you have all been waiting for... Cherry D!"

I picked up the guitar and walked out. I wasn't usually nervous but with Jerry so close to us, I could feel the fear choking me.

I walked up to the microphone and the lights shone onto me. The room was set up auditorium style and it was packed. The crowd roared while I tried to settle my nerves. I started strumming the guitar and closed my eyes. I did what I always did when I was on stage; I pretended that I was somewhere else. Alone in my room playing for Aaron and then the words flowed effortlessly. I sang a few songs over the screaming fans and then I saw Jerry grinning at me from a glass box which was mounted above the people.

When the stage went dark an hour later for the break, everyone was chanting for Cherry D to come back. I walked toward Chase and I could see the pride in his eyes and for once I didn't feel ashamed of singing. He pulled me into his arms. "Grace that was the most amazing thing I have ever heard."

I felt so safe in his arms, the way I felt when Aaron would hold me after a night with my mother. Was I replacing Aaron with Chase? It felt so unfair to both of them, but in that moment, I didn't want to be anywhere else. He held me until we heard my mother's name again. I walked back onto the stage and played a few more songs.

"I will be playing my last song," I announced to the crowd. "It's called _The Simpler Days_. Thank you all for coming out tonight," I said as the band started playing.

I wasn't sure if I wanted to sing this song with Chase watching me, but I didn't prepare anything else. It was a song I wrote for my mother. I sang it every night at her shows for two years hoping that she would hear me screaming to her over all the noise. But she was too far gone for me to save.

I shakily started strumming the guitar but the words wouldn't come out. The band stopped playing and I started to feel sick. The crowd was cheering me on, but it did nothing to calm me. Then I saw Chase in the corner of my eye and I turned to look at him and he smiled at me. A smile I knew so well, the one I would get from Aaron almost every day. One that reassured me that I would get through everything bad that I had been through, because he was there and he believed in me. I wasn't sure if I could trust Chase that much. But he was there and he never gave me any reason to think otherwise. And in that moment, I decided that perhaps it was time to let someone in again. To allow Chase to be that person.

The band started playing the intro for the third time and then the words came out.

Why are we here? Take my hand and let's just leave.

What do I have to do, to make you love me more than this?

When did it all go wrong, please let it go.

I don't want to be in this life alone.

Let's go back to the simpler days, to the days when it was just us three.

To the day when nothing else mattered but me.

And if I cannot change your mind, please just let me go.

Because living in a world like this, is crueler than you know.

When the song was over and the lights faded, I could feel my eyes burning, but I swallowed the lump in my throat and walked away and I felt the same way I always did before Aaron saved me. Empty. Alone.

But then I looked up into Chase's eyes and he was waiting for me. Waiting to make it okay, the beautiful, dangerous man I vowed to stay away from and as I walked up to him, he grabbed me in his arms. "Grace..." he breathed "that was...you are amazing, you know that!"

"Thank you," I whispered as my eyes filled with tears.

He picked up my jacket and held it open. "You ready?" he asked.

I slipped it on and nodded. I wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. I didn't bother to look for Cherry, she was probably long gone by now, her debt was paid and she didn't need me anymore. But I was okay with that, I gave up on her a long time ago. It didn't hurt anymore.

As we walked out onto the dark side street where Chase's car was parked, a black limo pulled up next to us and the tinted window rolled down slowly. It was Jerry's cold black eyes staring at me. "You did great tonight, baby, maybe we should do this again."

Chase stepped in front of me. "She did what you wanted, so now you leave her alone," he warned.

Jerry burst out in laughter, "you should be careful son," he said as he drove off.

I must have started to shake, because Chase put his arms around me. "It's over now, Grace, let's go home."

"You shouldn't speak to Jerry like that, Chase," I said weakly as we were driving home. "He is a very dangerous man."

"I don't give a shit who he thinks he is, if he ever comes near you again, Grace, I swear I will kill him."

I sighed not sure what to make of his over protectiveness and hoping that Jerry would forget about him. He had a habit of holding grudges.

I was exhausted when I got home; I went straight to the shower and let the burning water run over my body. I stood there until my skin was red, hoping that scalding water would burn the scars off my soul. But I knew my past would always haunt me and I turned off the water and fell into the shower and sobbed.

When I felt calmer, I climbed out and towel dried my hair. I walked to my room and found a message from my dad asking me how things went and a message from Bobby wanting to know when I would be back. I was too tired to respond so I put my phone in my drawer and walked to where Chase was sitting.

He immediately put his arm around me when I sat down and I rested my head on his shoulder. We watched a mute movie flashing on the screen.

"So do you want to tell me who that guy was?" Chase spoke up breaking the silence.

I took a deep breath; there was no reason to hide this part of my life from Chase any longer. "Jerry is a big time mobster and a drug Lord, he was the one who supplied my mother with drugs. The cost of cause was singing for him. My father was not home enough to notice the change in her, but I did. She went from doting mother to mood swinging Cherry D. She came home one day and saw me playing my guitar and came to sit with me. We sang a song together and it warmed my heart, I hadn't seen that side of her in a long time. She played me just right to, she came home and spent time with me for a few days before she dropped the bomb that she wanted me to sing on her behalf."

I cringed as I relived the memory and Chase pulled me closer when he noticed.

"You don't have to go further," he said.

I shook my head, "it's fine I want to. I was young and stupid back then, she fed me a lot of lies and I believed her. I wanted to help her. I sang practically every night and she robbed me of everything.

"Didn't Jerry notice that you weren't her?" Chase questioned.

"I suppose he had his suspicions, but he didn't care as long as the money rolled in. He took every cent she ever made and she just lied to my dad that she wasn't getting any gigs, causing him to work harder to support us."

"That bastard will get his in the end," Chase seethed.

"Chase if you ever come across him again, you shouldn't...He is a dangerous man."

He relaxed his creased eyebrows, "I'm not that fragile, Grace." He nudged me playfully.

"I didn't think that you were," I smiled up at him. "And I'm sorry you got messed up in my weird life.

He was quiet for a moment, "Grace you're not the only one with a fucked up past. At least you had one parent who loved you."

_What does that mean_ , I wondered? Chase never told me what he did in juvi and I didn't want to ask.

"You grew up without parents?" I asked. He shook his head, "my dad died recently and well, my mom was never really a mother to me."

"Chase, I'm so sorry about your dad," I sat up shocked.

"Don't be, he was a bastard, he didn't die early enough if you ask me."

I stared at the side of his face, his eyes were filled with hatred and my heart suddenly ached for him.

He turned his face to me and his eyes softened. I don't know why I did what I did, but I just wanted to make him feel better. I was so grateful for everything he had done; I wanted to do something for him. But I knew the real reason was that I wanted to kiss him, because over these past few weeks I had fallen for him. So I leaned in to his face and he looked at me conflicted, his eyes searching mine and then he looked away.

"Grace... I..."

"No, I'm sorry," I said standing up quickly, "you just want to be friends, I get it! How could I be so stupid."

"Grace, please it's not like that."

"Don't bother, Chase, it's my fault. I'm sorry."

I went to my room and shut the door, tears streaming down my face.

Why did I do that, why did I have to ruin everything? I walked over to my bed and held onto my pillow, "Aaron why did you have to leave me," I whispered, "I am so lost without you." I lay in my bed for a few hours, sobbing, until I eventually fell asleep.

The next morning, I packed my bags and put it in the car. I was dreading the drive home because it was me who made this whole situation awkward. Chase made it clear that we should just be friends and it was me who made a fool out of myself. I found him making coffee in the kitchen when I walked back in.

"Grace, I..." he started saying something but I cut him off.

"No, Chase, you really don't need to say anything, I was stupid. I didn't even mean to do that I just didn't know how to make you feel better."

"So you didn't really want to kiss me?" He scrunched up his face.

"No! I don't want to ruin what we have. I really like you and you have been really good to me, I would not have been able to do this without you, so I really am sorry. You didn't deserve for me to spring something like that on you."

He turned away and looked at his cup of coffee on the wooden table. "We should get going," he said.

Chapter 8

I felt Chase distancing himself over the next few days. He would just pop into my room every now and then to check if I heard anything from Cherry and if I was okay. We were now picture-perfect friends only, except for the part where I ruined even our friendship.

Bobby came over to my room Friday with a little suitcase, "I'm staying here for the weekend," she announced. I told her what happened with Chase and she tried her best to keep me distracted.

We watched re-runs of an old sitcom and then I got up to make us something to eat. "What do you want for dinner?" I asked when we heard a knock on the door.

I went to open it and found Dean leaning against the doorframe and Sebastian next to him.

"Hey, guys." I smiled. "Do you need something?"

"Hey, Grace," Dean said, "I was actually wondering if Bobby was here."

I moved aside. "Please, come in."

"Hey Bobby," Dean said sitting down next to her. "I'm sorry to ruin girls' night in, but I was wondering if I could steal you for an hour or two."

"Actually, I promised Grace I would stay with her so maybe another time."

"No, go," I urged her. "I'm sure what Dean has planned is much more exciting than what we're doing."

"Are you sure?" she asked, her question full of hidden meanings.

"Yes," I said, as I handed her jacket. "Please go." I knew that she was also afraid that she might actually like Dean.

"I'll go but only if you share the food you were going to make with Sebastian."

I looked at Sebastian, "okay with me," he shrugged.

"I'll be back soon, I promise," Bobby said to me.

"Take your time," I told her.

After they left, Sebastian and I decided on pizza. I took out the store bought bases I had in the freezer and he helped me put the toppings on, laughing at my peculiar combinations. "Banana and avocado, is weird," he argued.

I shook my head, "don't knock it, until you've tried it."

I heard another knock on my door as I was about to put the pizza in the oven and Sebastian went to open it. Chase walked in and his eyes darted from me to Sebastian and back to me and then he walked back out again.

Sebastian got up to go after him but I stopped him. "Let me go," I said.

"Chase!" I called as he headed out of the building; he ignored me and continued walking. I ran outside with no shoes on and hugged myself as the cold hit me. "Chase wait," I said as I grabbed his arm. He turned to look at me but said nothing.

"What is your problem, Chase?"

"What is Sebastian doing in your room, Grace?"

"What? Is that what you're angry about? I don't think I need to explain myself to you," I said and crossed my arms.

"I thought we went over this, he is not a good guy when it comes to women."

"We're having pizza, Chase not jumping into bed together. What is your problem anyway? You don't want to be with me but nobody else can? Do you have any idea how insane that sounds?"

"It's not that I don't... I just want you to be careful," he said his voice softening.

"You have already said that and as I said before, Chase, I am a big girl and I damn sure will be with whoever I want to. If you are my friend as you're always reminding me, then you will stay the hell out of this."

"Whatever, Grace," he said as he turned around. "You do what you want."

"I will!" I screamed at him as tears stung my eyes.

I walked slowly back into the building and stood outside my door for a while, I felt kind of ridiculous that we fought like two kindergarteners, but who did he think he was anyway. I wiped my eyes and took a deep breath before I walked back in.

"Everything okay?" Sebastian asked.

"Yeah," I tried to smile.

"Look, Grace, Chase is my friend; I don't want to get in the way of whatever is going on with you two."

"Believe me absolutely nothing is going on with us, as Chase reminds me all the time, we are just friends."

"Trust me, Grace, I've known Chase for a long time and there is definitely more than feelings of friendship going on there."

I didn't respond to that, I knew that he was wrong, no matter how well he thought he knew him, Chase made it clear that we were nothing more than friends.

"Sebastian, you and I are friends. I would hate for Chase to determine who I can and cannot be friends with, but I don't want to complicate your friendship either. So if you want to leave, I won't hold it against you."

He shook his head. "I'll speak to him tonight. You're right, I like hanging out with you too."

Great, I thought as I took the pizza out of the oven, I have another friend. Agatha would be so proud.

I tried to keep my mind of Chase as Sebastian and I dug into the pizza. I found out that evening that Sebastian was a really funny guy; he took a gap year and travelled abroad which also made him really interesting to listen to. We lost track of time when we heard laughter in the hallway. Sebastian looked at his watch, "I'd better get going," he said.

I walked with him to the door and I was about to close it when Chase stumbled past me with a brown haired bombshell draped over his arm. He stopped for a moment to look at me and then grabbed the girl and pulled her back to the exit.

"Where are we going?" she asked in a sickening sweet voice which sounded like it didn't belong to her.

"Let's get out of here," he said.

I slammed the door angrily and felt my heart sink. Chase Ryder was a lying drunk. How could that be the same guy who went home with mw just a few days ago? "Don't do that, Grace," I told myself, "you know what kind of guy he is and you are just friends."

"Who are you just friends with?" I heard Aaron's voice.

"Aaron," I said as I tried to smile at him.

"Hey, what's got you so upset?"

I went to sit down and dropped my head in my hands. "Guys are so complicated. I'm not well equipped to deal with them. I mean you were never like this."

"It sounds to me as though you really like this guy."

"I did...I don't...I mean I don't know. I am trying, Aaron, I want to let people in but with what happened in my past, with you. I don't think I can, I don't think that I can give my heart to another person on this planet."

"Gracy," he said as he reached over and let his hand linger on top of mine. "You have to stop. All this hurting, not trusting people it won't end well."

"But how do I know who to trust, Aaron, who do I let in?"

"You practically raised yourself, Grace, I have no doubt that you'll figure it out. And hey, if you do trust the wrong person, just pick yourself up and learn from it. It's not the worst thing that can happen. You holding onto the hurt because you think it's keeping you close to what is real, but it's not, Gracy. It's damaging you."

"As if I need to be more screwed up," I snorted.

He shook his head, "you're not screwed up, you just have to remember who you were before all of this. Before I left."

There was a knock on the door and Aaron disappeared.

When I opened it up Bobby was standing outside. "Hey, girly, just checking to see if you're okay?"

"Yes," I smiled I am fine, "how was your date?"

She pursed her lips together. "It went better than I expected. He is smart and funny and amazing," she gushed. He is waiting outside, apparently he has more surprises."

"And you left him waiting to check on me, just go," I said shoving her forward. I didn't want her to look at me for too long incase her Bobby senses kicked in.

"I felt bad about leaving you hanging," she told me.

"Go," I said faking a huge smile, "and I want all the details tomorrow."

"Okay, call me if you need me," she hugged me.

I went back inside and felt somewhat better, Bobby was a good friend. I was lucky to have her. Aaron was right; it was time that I stopped pushing people away. I fell asleep shortly after that and my dreams were filled with horrific images of Chase's lips on the brown haired girl.

The next morning, I was woken up by the smell of coffee brewing in the kitchen. I jumped up from my bed and warily walked to the kitchen. Chase was the only one with a key to my room, he insisted on getting his own one after what happened back home. He was standing with a cup in his hand when I walked in.

"Chase, what the hell are you doing here, have you completely lost your mind!"

"I think so," was his response.

"What! What does that mean? You can't just come into my room in the early hours of the morning when I am asleep. Especially after your eventful night out!" I felt a stab in my heart when I thought about where he was last night.

"Grace," he said as he stared into my eyes. "I am so sorry. I know I fucked up and I have been saying that a lot lately, but I don't know how to do this."

"Do what, Chase?" I put my hands on my hips.

"I feel this need to protect you and I know I get out of control sometimes. If you like Sebastian," I could hear him swallow. "Then..."

"Chase," I interrupted him. "Sebastian and I are nothing more than friends and I will probably make a few while I am here. What? Are you going to run security checks on all of them?"

"I know and you're right. I don't know how to do this so please be patient with me."

"Do what?" I asked

"Be friends with someone... like you."

I didn't want to get into what he meant by that. "Let's just keep it simple," I suggested. "If I need your help with guys or whoever, I will ask you."

He contorted his face at that. "I have to get to band practice. Will I see you at the round house tonight?"

"That depends," I told him.

"On what?" he asked me.

"On whether or not you are going to stop acting like my crazy friend and just be my friend. You can't just come into my room whenever you feel like it either, that key is meant for emergencies."

He walked toward me and looked sternly into my eyes. "Grace I'm sorry I'm acting like a mad man. I promise it will stop tonight. Please come."

I nodded my head. "See you later," I told him.

"And by the way, I didn't do anything with the girl you saw me with last night, I couldn't," he said and walked out.

I stood staring at the door, wondering why he felt the need to tell me that.

Aaron was there as soon as Chase closed the door. " _Did you sort it out_?" he asked me.

"I just feel so confused. I don't think I was exposed to people enough in my lifetime."

He laughed, "What are you so confused about. Could the people you're referring to be Chase?"

I nodded. "I think, I mean I know he is bad news, but I just can't stay away from him. If I'm really honest I think that deep down I'm tired of being his friend."

"And what makes you so sure he is bad news," Aaron asked me.

"Well, all the women for starters and he seems crazy, I am not sure if I have actually forgiven him for last night yet," I said.

"You remember when I first found you?" Aaron asked. "You were sitting in the school cafeteria alone, the bell for the first class had gone off a long time ago and I happened to walk past and saw you crying.

"How could I forget, you saved me," I told him as the memory came with a wave of emotions.

"I was only able to help you once you broke down all those walls. You were so broken and hiding all those dark secrets. It took me months to get through to you."

"What are you saying?" I asked him.

"I'm saying that maybe he needs saving too."

The realization hit me hard; the thing that I was most drawn to about Chase was the fact that he was just as broken as I once was. Hidden behind a solid wall, hiding from everyone who he really was and too afraid to trust.

"Aaron, I need to..." I turned around but he was gone.

I pulled out my black jeans and a red sweater and quickly headed out by the door. I walked nervously across the field, my head reeling. I couldn't believe that I missed it, but I wanted to help him. I couldn't stand the thought of knowing that someone was going through what I went through. It all made perfect sense now. That was probably one the reasons why he never spoke about his past, it must have been just as bad as mine. I was the one that was being a bad friend all along, he needed me and I was too selfish to see it.

I walked passed the crowd, grateful that the doorman recognized me and went inside. The lights were low and then I heard the strumming of a guitar. I looked up and saw Chase, he wasn't looking at anyone in particular and then he started singing, Callum Scott's _Dancing On My Own_. It was so raw that his voice was raspy and in that moment, I saw every inch of his pain. I felt it right down to my core. What was it that he was hiding that was so painful? When he finished the song, his eyes fell on my teary ones and I tried to blink them away.

He looked at me as if he knew that he had just shown me a part of himself that he didn't want anyone to see. We stared at each other and for a moment it was as if everyone else in the room disappeared. It was only me and him. Then he suddenly changed the tempo and the band played deafening beats for the rest of the night. I sat by the bar and waited for him, drinking only water although I was tempted to get something stronger to calm my nerves. But I wanted to face Chase with a clear head; I wanted him to know that I wanted to help. When they were finally done, he came down and walked toward me.

"Hey," he whispered in my ear over the noise.

"Hey," I said, "do you wanna get out of here?" I asked bravely.

He nodded.

We walked back to our building, both saying nothing for a long time, knowing that something changed in our relationship tonight. "You were great tonight," I said wanting to ease the tension.

"Thanks," he said as he dug his hands into his black jeans.

When we arrived back at my room he walked me to my door and before I opened it I turned to him. He stared at me for the longest time like he wanted to tear down a part of that wall and tell me what he was hiding. But he didn't, he whispered goodnight and left.

I walked into my kitchen, not sure what to do. Not sure how I was going to be a friend to him if he didn't let me in. Then I thought about what Aaron did. He was honest. He told me what he thought was happening and how he knew I was hiding my true self from him. That he would still love me the same no matter what it was and that broke me.

I walked back out of my door and knocked on his. "Grace," he said surprised. "You okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine but I need to talk to you."

"Sure, come inside." I walked into his immaculately clean living room, it looked different from the first time I saw it. The gray sofa was arranged in an L-shape and there was a glass table in a square shape in front of it. There was a flat screen TV mounted on the wall that I hadn't noticed before and a hand shaped orange cushion in the corner. He motioned for me to sit down and he sat down next to me.

"Did Cherry contact you again?" he asked, concerned.

"It's not about her," I told him as I looked down. "It's about you."

He said nothing.

I looked at him, but he turned away from me. "Chase, I have been where you are. I have lived in your shielded world, where it hurts too much to let anyone in. But all you really want to do is for someone to pull you out of there, so that it's not so hard to live or to love."

He walked toward the window in the far corner of the room, folding his arms. I followed him; I knew this was not going to be easy.

"Chase, you said you want to be friends, so let me be. I want to help you and I can help you if you let me in. I don't need all the details; I just need your guard down, for you to trust me. You have to start somewhere. I revealed the darkest part of my life to you, show me yours," I said as I put my hand on his back.

He turned back around and grabbed my arms. "Grace, I am no good for you. I don't want to hurt you; you don't deserve to be around someone like me."

"Sometimes life hands you a shitty deal, Chase, I get that but it doesn't make you a bad guy."

He shook his head, "I just wish that I can get you out of my head, but there is not even one second of the day that I don't think about your beautiful face."

My eyes went wide at his revelation. "What does that mean?" I asked him.

"I know that back at your house I told you I didn't want anything more than friendship but that was a lie. I thought it would be better for you if we stayed friends, because I am not worthy of someone like you, Grace. But I can't stand it anymore; I can't stand the thought of you being with someone else. So maybe I should just tell you..."

He went quiet and searched my eyes.

I put my hands in his to encourage him to continue.

He took one of his hands and put it to my cheek. "For the first time in my life, I think I have fallen in love... with you!"

I was too shocked to say anything and I stood still as he leaned in and put his soft lips over mine. My mouth parted as he gently stroked my tongue with his. I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss, letting him know that I felt the same way. In that moment, we fused our broken souls together, and I silently hoped that we were not making a mistake.
Chapter 9

It was the last week of school before our three-week holiday. The gossiping around WRC started immediately, everyone asking if it was true that the lead singer of The Bleeding Hearts was dating someone. Some of the girls in my class flat out asked me about it, but I ignored their questions, mainly because I didn't have an answer. Chase and I shared one kiss, and yes he told me that he loved me and was always at my side, but we never put a label on it and I didn't want to be presumptuous.

Bobby and Dean, on the other hand were getting serious fast. He was even going home with her for the holidays. I decided to stay; I didn't want to do three weeks with Agatha and Chris. Not because I didn't miss them, but because I needed more time away from that place, since my recent visit was so unpleasant.

After our final class on Friday, Bobby came over to my room to say goodbye and asked me for the hundredth time if I didn't want to go home with her. Apparently, there was enough room in her house.

"I'll be fine on my own, Bobby. Just call me when you get home safely."

"And you call me if you need anything," she said pulling me into a bear hug. For someone so tiny she had a strong pair of arms on her.

After she left there was a knock on the door, I opened it and saw Chase smiling at me.

"Hey," he said. "Mind if I come in?"

"I don't mind at all," I told him. "I thought you were going home for the holidays?"

"Nothing to go home to," he told me. He still had his wall up, but I was working on it.

"How about you?" he asked.

"Same here," I said.

We stood in silence until I broke it. "Chase, what happened between us was that a mistake? I mean, you have been kind of distant since we kissed."

He shook his head. "Grace, what I told you was the truth and I don't want to mess things up with us. But I am afraid that I will, and I can't lose you. Every day I think you going to walk out when you're realize what I really am."

I walked toward him and put my hands on either side of his face, "Chase, I told you, whatever you are going through, I will be there for you. Nothing is going to scare me away." I could sense his tension easing and he pulled me in his arms.

"I just want us to take things slow; I have never really loved anyone in my life. All the women in my past, they were a means to forget. Every time I tried to get close to someone I felt like I was suffocating. But with you it's different, I want to do everything right."

I tried to hold back my tears as I held onto him. "You never gave me a chance to tell you..." I said.

"Tell me what?" he asked as he looked at me.

"That I am in love with you too."

He laughed and pulled me into his arms giving me one of his amazing kisses, which left me breathless.

"So what are we going to do for three weeks?" I asked when we came up for air.

"Well, I did promise you that I would show you around Winchester and I haven't had a chance to yet."

"I would love that," I said.

"First things first, I am starving," he told me. "So, if you will allow me, I would like to take you out on our first date."

I chuckled. "Well if it is our first date sir, then you have to leave so that I can dress appropriately."

"Of course, madam." He bowed. "You have one hour," he said kissing me softly on my cheek before he left.

I started panicking after that; I didn't go shopping for any new clothes yet and nothing I had was date worthy. I picked up my phone to text Bobby. _Hey B, long story short, I have my first date with Chase and have nothing to wear!_

She responded seconds later.

I knew it! I knew it! I knew it! No worries :) I got you covered. I knew something like this was bound to happen so I stuffed a dress in your cupboard, behind those gorgeous red stiletto's you swore you would never wear. I wanted to give it to you the day you got back home but you were a bit down in the dumps over Chase, so I hid it there.

I frowned at the thought that she spent money on me and before I could tell her so, I received another text.

Don't get too excited about me spending money; it was a two for one special, so I have the same one in a different color.

I smiled, she knew me to well. I texted her back, _you are a life saver, thank you._

Anytime, just pay me back in details, was what her last text said.

I quickly went to my cupboard and saw the black and silver bag she was talking about, the bag alone looked really expensive and I could only imagine what the dress had cost. I put my hand in and felt the smooth silky texture of the dress, confirming that I was right about how expensive it was. It was a beautiful, off the shoulder, straight cut back dress and I anxiously worried if I could pull it off with my curves.

I jumped in the shower, combed out my hair and put on my dress. I looked at the red high heels for a long time before I decided that nothing else I had would go with the dress. When I heard a knock on the door, I quickly looked in the mirror and decided that the dress fit me perfectly. Bobby was definitely a fashion guru. The dress hugged my curves and wasn't so short that it appeared tacky and it was plain, except for the ruffled strap running over my left shoulder.

I opened the door for Chase and his eyes went wide. I looked down shyly and he lifted my chin with his hand. "How did I get so lucky?" he breathed. "To say you look beautiful would not be enough."

'Thank you," I said as I raked my eyes over him. He looked just as breathtaking. He wore a fitted white t-shirt and black jeans. "You look quite dashing yourself," I told him.

He ignored my compliment. "Grace, how do you expect me to take you out looking like this? You're going to get me into so much trouble. I'm going to beat up every guy that looks at you," he said seriously.

"Then you had better keep your eyes on me only," I told him as I kissed his lips, trying to soothe his already jealous heart.

He took me to a Japanese restaurant about a half an hour away and when we walked in I noticed that the entire restaurant was set up like an open planned kitchen. There were iron griddles set up in the middle of each table and the tables were arranged in a large circular formation. Chase gave a Japanese woman his name and she led us to our table and handed us the menu.

"This looks interesting," I said to him.

"It's about to get even more interesting," he said as a Japanese man walked toward us with a tall chef hat. He threw some oil on the griddle and when he lit it a high flame arose.

"Good evening," the chef said, "what can I get for you tonight?"

I looked at Chase and shrugged. "Everything looks foreign to me."

"Shrimp or steak?" he asked me.

"Steak," I said.

"My kinda girl," he winked and turned to the chef. "We'll have two steak teppanyaki please."

I watched in awe as the chef sliced the steak and threw it around on the griddle. He was very efficient and a few minutes later he added some vegetables, poured sauce over it and made two equal portions.

"Enjoy," he said and walked away.

"Are we supposed to eat it straight from here," I whispered to Chase.

He laughed. "I can always ask them to get you a plate if you like."

"No, it's fine; I've just never experienced anything like this before."

After I ate some of the food, I found that it was flavorful and delicious. "This place is amazing, Chase, thanks for bringing me here."

"I'm just glad that we have a chance to talk after all the craziness we've been through and that you are finally mine," he said pulling me close to him.

I kissed his cheek. "I can't believe it either." I told him.

I couldn't remember when last I was this happy. Then I thought of Aaron and my mood took a dip into the dark side. I placed my fork next to my plate suddenly losing my appetite. Chase noticed and he squeezed my hand, something on your mind, Grace?"

I smiled at him, "everything is perfect."

"So, how long have you been playing guitar, you are seriously good, I'm surprised you didn't apply to a music school," Chase said.

"I can't even remember when I started; I must have been eight years old. I picked up an old guitar of my mother's and it was the most natural thing I had ever done. But of course, when my mother found out, she tainted music for me forever."

"You shouldn't allow her to rob you of that, Grace, you are unbelievably talented and that talent belongs to you, not Cherry."

I never thought of it that way, but he was right. Cherry was not a part of my life for a long time and it was time for me to break free from her.

"How about you?" I asked, changing the subject, where did you learn to play?" His expression changed suddenly and he looked away. I touched his hand, "you don't have to tell me, if you're not ready."

"No," he said, "I know that we are both dealing with a dark past with lots of demons, but we have to start letting each other in completely or this won't work."

I nodded in agreement, although I knew that there was a part of my past I didn't ever think I would be able to share with him.

"My grandfather was the only man I was ever close to and he loved playing guitar, he stayed in the old aged home close to our house. I would visit him every day after school and we would sit and listen to his records or he would teach me to play guitar.

He stopped and looked down at his plate.

"In middle school, during summer break I found this old vinyl at that store next to Barneys and I was so happy because it was Chuck Berry, my grandfather loved listening to him—so I bought it as an early birthday gift."

Chase pursed his lips and then took a deep breath.

"I remember turning into the left wing where he stayed and a nurse stopping me in the hallway to tell me he was gone. I was the only one at his funeral, not even his own son, my good for nothing father was there. He left me his guitar, it was the only thing he owned and a note telling me that I shouldn't ever stop playing and I vowed that I never would."

"I'm sorry, Chase," I whispered, knowing exactly what kind of heartache he went through.

"You wanna get out of here?" he asked.

I nodded. He paid the bill and we walked back to the car. "Thanks for sharing that with me," I said.

"I told you, Grace I want to make this work. I want you to know everything about me, just give me time. But enough of all this sad talk," he said. "What do you feel like doing for the rest of the evening?"

"Honestly, I would actually just like to go home. It has been a really long day. Can we continue our tour tomorrow?"

"Anything you want, baby," he said.

I pursed my lips together and tried not to smile.

"What?" Chase asked when he noticed.

"You called me baby."

"You don't like it?" he asked.

"It's just different."

He planted a gentle kiss on my lips before he opened the door for me.

College was eerily quiet and I was glad that I was not there alone. We walked into our building and Chase stopped at my door. "You're not coming in?"

He looked conflicted as he shuffled his feet and shoved his hands into his jeans pocket, "it's late and I don't trust myself around you," he said.

He pulled me against his hard muscular frame, putting his arms around my waist and kissed me. I parted my lips slowly, savoring every moment and when I bit his lower lip, he let out a low grumble and he stopped. I tried not to groan at him.

"See you tomorrow, baby," he winked and walked off.

I was about to close the door but instead leaned against the door frame and watched him stride in God like perfection toward his room. As if he knew I was watching him, when he reached for his door handle he stopped and wiggled his butt before going inside. I burst into laughter and went into my room. I leaned against the door, sighing heavily. Chase was amazing, I didn't know why I was so worried.

"Someone had a good evening."

I quickly opened my eyes and saw Aaron standing in front of me. "Aaron," I gasped guiltily.

"You look better, happier, since the last time I saw you."

I didn't respond, I didn't know how to.

"You deserve to be happy, Gracy, I want you to be."

"It just feels unfair to you," I told him.

"Forget about that, tell me how your evening went and don't spare any details."

"It was really amazing," I told him honestly. "Chase is still a work in progress but I really like him. He is nothing like what people have been saying about him. He is sweet and caring and just a tad bit too overprotective," I laughed.

We lay down on the bed together and I continued to tell him about my night with Chase, until I eventually fell asleep. I felt happy and at peace and for the first time in a long time, I had a dream which didn't include Aaron leaving or dying. I dreamt about Chase's perfectly sculpted lips on mine.

***

Chase was knocking at my door early the next morning and when I opened he was standing with a picnic basket in his hand.

"Good morning," I smiled.

He leaned in to kiss me and then stared at me.

I self-consciously wrapped my arms around my body. "What?" I asked coyly. "Don't tell me it's about the bunnies again."

He shook his head. "How do you look this beautiful when you just woke up?"

I flushed. "I believe love can make one hallucinate."

He smiled broadly like a mad man. "There isn't a drug in the world that could conjure up such a vision."

I shook my head. "You're crazy."

He grabbed my hand and pulled me toward him, "If crazy is needing to wake up to this every morning, then brand me a basket case!"

My breath quickened. Things were happening so fast, was this always how it was? I had no idea, but I didn't think that I wanted it to slow down.

"So what is the picnic basket all about?" I asked, while he still held me in his arms.

"It's time for our second date and since we have some rare sunlight, I thought we might enjoy it and go for an al fresco dining experience."

"I would love that, but you need to give me a few minutes," I told him.

I quickly jumped into the shower and got dressed. I put on a pair of black pants and my favorite blue jersey; even though the sun was shining, it was still a bit chilly.

When I walked into the room, Chase smiled at me. "You are a vision, Grace Delaney, I can't believe that I spent so many years without you."

"We have plenty of time to catch up," I said, walking toward him and wrapping my arms around him.

"We better get going, because if I stay here with you any longer, this picnic might not happen."

I laughed as he practically pulled me out the door. I walked toward his car, when I heard him call out to me. "Where are you going?" he grinned.

"I thought we're going for a drive?"

He put his hand out. "Let me show you the beauty that WRC has to offer."

He intertwined his fingers with mine and guided me toward a path behind the art studio. I looked around as we were walking through the rows of trees, the leaves had turned brown and were scattered all over the path leaving the trees almost bare. After we walked for several minutes, we stopped a row of bushes, it seemed like the end our tour since we couldn't go any further.

"Is this it?" I asked.

"Not quite," Chase said, moving a few of the branches away and revealing a brown wooden door.

My eyes went wide and I squealed like a twelve year old. "Seriously? A secret garden?"

He grinned as he opened the door. The garden was beautiful, although it wasn't a big space. It was wedged in by rows of green bushes that extended high up. It had an array of different colored wild flowers and just one tall tree in the center. The grass was trimmed, which meant that a few people obviously knew about it. "How did you find this place? I asked him.

"The same guy that gave you a key to that art studio," he said.

"Andrew?"

He nodded. "When I first came here, I was dealing with a lot of shit and I needed a quiet place to drown out all the noise. Andy saw me walking around one day, I must have looked like a mad man, because he told me to follow him and showed me this place."

"Is that man real or is he a guardian angel?" I asked.

Chase laughed. "I know, he's a great guy."

We walked around the tall tree and I saw that Chase had already laid everything out on a blue picnic blanket. There were two trays with Champaign glasses, which looked like they had orange juice in them. There were Muffins and croissants and various cheeses. "This looks amazing, Chase."

"I'm glad you like it, please sit down."

I took one of the muffins and when I bit into it, I realized it was blueberry flavored. "You really do make amazing food."

"Thanks," he smiled.

"How is it that you know so much about this place if you started the same year as me?" I scrunched my face.

"You don't miss much, do you?" He laughed.

I grinned as I continued eating the moist muffin.

"I got out of juvie early and decided to come here for the summer. They ran a few summer classes to get you ready for the next year. Transitional classes they called it, so I decided to do it. But it was only two days a week, so I spent the rest of the time roaming the woods of WRC," he said.

"Oh, yes," I responded, "I heard about those classes, it was supposedly for students to get a head start on the year."

"So I am assuming you were too smart to attend then?" he smirked.

"You assume wrong," I said looking away from him. "I was just pre-occupied with some things at home."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry."

"You didn't," I said forcing a smile.

We ate the rest of the food in silence as we listened to the almost tangible silence. It really was serene there.

When we were done eating, Chase lay back looking up at the clear blue sky. I watched him, I never saw him more at peace than in that moment. I lay down on his chest and he kissed my head. "Thank you for sharing this with me," I told him.

He was quiet for a moment and then I felt his chest rise and fall as he sighed deeply. "Grace, there is something I've been meaning to tell you..."

I held my breath, anticipating the next part.

"My father was a mean drunk; he beat my mother every day for as long as I can remember. One day when I came home she was lying out cold on the floor. That was the day I had enough. He was lying on the bed laughing at something on TV as if my mother wasn't comatose on the kitchen floor. We got into it and I knocked him unconscious, or at least I thought he was and I dragged him to the car. I threw him in the back seat and drove to the police station but we never got there. He woke up and we started fighting again. I lost control of the car and killed him. The court ruled everything an accident, but they still thought that I would have better structure in juvi."

I looked up at him and I saw a haunted look on his face. "I'm so sorry, Chase, that's awful."

He shook his head and when his eyes filled up with tears, he looked up at the sky again. "It's not that he died, it's...." his voice trailed off and I could see that he was not ready to tell me anymore.

"It's okay, Chase, tell me when you're ready, I'll be here." He pulled me into his arms and held onto me tightly. We lay like that for hours, listening to the silence and knowing that we were the fragile chords holding each other together. It started to get darker and when the cold started to settle on our skin, Chase sat up. "I think it's time for us to get going," he told me.

As we were walking back he stopped and looked at me. "I'm sorry that my life seems like a never-ending story of darkness and despair."

"Don't think of it like that, Chase, you pulled yourself out of that situation and you should be proud. By the way, I have never asked you what you are studying; I know that we have some classes together."

He smiled at me and I could see that being here was something he was proud of. "If I had it my way I would play music for the rest of my life, but since it's hard to make it in that industry, I had to have a plan B.

I never got good grades at school, so I never thought that I would even go to college. But my year at juvi, we were forced to work hard. There wasn't much else we could do. My math and science grade sky rocketed in that year; it seemed that I had a natural aptitude for numbers and formulas. One of the wardens, Officer John O' Neil, who I became very close to, encouraged me to apply to WRC, said he knew a few people and would put in a good word for me. I don't know what I would have done had it not been for him, he became the closest thing I had ever had to a father in that year. He helped me choose my career path which I decided would be engineering."

"Wow, that's amazing," I told him. "And you're lucky, my art ability alone got me in at WRC, numbers and I are not such great friends. Which reminds me, I had better get hold of that math tutor after the holidays because pre-calculus is killing me."

He chuckled softly.

"What?" I nudged him.

"I think I can get you some extra time with the tutor," he said.

"Really, how?"

"For starters, he's in love with you, so that shouldn't be a problem."

I stood still. "Wait, don't tell me you're the math and science tutor?"

He nodded. "I am one of them, although I have been turning down a lot of students this year because of my commitment to the band."

"I can't picture it," I teased.

He laughed. "When the warden helped me, even though everyone saw me as a good for nothing son of a drunk, I wanted to do the same for other kids like me. I might even end up teaching, one day."

"You are one remarkable man, Chase Ryder."

He looked at me with his brows knitted as if he didn't believe those words, but I was going to make sure that one day he knew that he was worthy of everything this life had to offer.
Chapter 10

When the last week of our holiday rolled in, I was feeling a bit down about it. Chase planned all these amazing things for us every day and I was going to miss being alone with him. He was unbelievably smart, tutoring me and simplifying numbers in a way that I never thought possible.

I hadn't seen Aaron, since he visited after my first date with Chase and I missed him.

One Sunday afternoon while Chase and I were watching a movie, we heard a knock on the door. There was literally no one else on campus, so we both looked wearily at the door.

"Grace, are you there?" I heard Bobby's voice on the other side. I quickly stood up to open it and when I did, I saw a teary-eyed Bobby standing with a suitcase in her hand.

"Bobby, what happened?" I asked as I pulled her into my arms.

She sniffed. "Dean broke up with me."

"What? Why?"

"I'm not exactly sure if he did, but something happened at home with my dad and I can't get a hold of him."

I looked back at Chase and he stood up, "Let me try," he told her and walked outside.

"Come sit down," I told Bobby.

She sat down on the sofa and I handed her a tissue. "Tell me what happened?"

"Dean and I were having an amazing time, my mom loved him, she was so happy that I actually brought a boy home with me. My dad was away on a business trip so I never saw him. He has always been hard on me, making his own fortune and being the sole owner of 'Croops & Things,' made him that way. He hated that I came to WRC, he always wanted me to go study Business at the University he went to, so that was our first fight before I left."

"Wait," I said wide eyed. "Your dad is the Mr. Croop?"

She nodded.

"Then what happened?" I asked trying not to get distracted by the fact that my new best friend was the daughter of a billionaire and she was so down to earth.

"He came home one evening while my mom and I were out shopping. Dean said we should go and he would cook us something nice to eat. Needless to say, my dad came home when we weren't there and he had some nasty things to say to Dean. When I came home, Dean told me he was sorry and left. He hasn't been answering my calls for days."

"I'm sorry, B," I said as I hugged her again.

"I have always put up with my dad's shit, but I will never forgive him for this."

Chase walked back in. "I got in touch with him, he went back home and is fine."

"I don't know what I am going to do to make him believe that what my dad says doesn't matter to me."

"He'll come around," Chase told her. "Dean can often be too honorable for his own good. He probably thought he was doing the right thing by leaving, but if he likes you as much as he says he does, he will be back.

"I'm sorry I ruined your week by showing up here," she told us.

"Think nothing of it," Chase told her. "I have something to do, Grace, I'll see you later?"

I nodded and he left.

Bobby and I spent the rest of the day at home and from time to time she would burst into random tears. Chase came over later that evening, while Bobby was in the shower. I was busy making us something to eat when he walked in.

"How is she doing?" he whispered to me.

"She is nursing a broken heart, so I suspect it will be a rough night."

"I just came to say goodnight, see you in the morning," he said kissing me on my lips. He let it linger there for a few seconds and then he left.

When Bobby came out of the shower, she looked at the food on the table and frowned.

"Thank you for going through all this trouble, Grace, but I wish you didn't. I can't eat a thing right now."

"I understand, we can leave that for later." I reached into the top cupboard and pulled out a bottle of red wine. I bought this at the store a few weeks ago. "You should at least have a glass or two, to help you sleep."

"I think the whole bottle might help," she frowned.

I poured her more than two glasses at her request and a few minutes after we got into bed, she was out like a candle.

The next day was much of the same thing. I tried to get Bobby out of the house but she refused. She stayed in her purple cotton pajamas and refused any food I pushed her way. Later that evening Chase tried to convince her too and then she finally agreed on dinner. As we were about to leave, we heard a knock on the door and Chase went to open it.

"She's been waiting for you," I heard him tell someone and then Dean walked in.

"Dean," Bobby breathed relieved.

He looked cut up, like he was doing much of the same thing Bobby was over the past few days.

"We will give you two a moment," I said.

"No please don't go," Dean said. "I left Bobby and she came to you, when I was the one that was supposed to work it out with her. So what I have to say, I want to say in front of everyone."

Chase and I stood together and he put his arm around my side.

Dean walked toward Bobby and took her hands in his. "I'm so sorry for what I did to you; I shouldn't have left like that. Your dad was just looking out for you, I get that."

"No, Dean, my father is an ass, I should have known that he would have pulled some shit like that and I should never have taken you there."

"I'm not scared of your dad, B and as long as I am going to be in your life, he will have to get used to having me around."

"Do you mean that?" she asked.

"B, if you don't know how much I like you by now..." he said as he pulled him toward her and kissed her.

"We'll be next door," I said as Chase and I walked out.

Bobby and Dean stayed there for a while and I convinced Chase to play me a song on his guitar. He sat across me in his living room on a brown leather chair and softly sang to me. I realized that there was a certain vulnerability to him when he played and my heart ached that he couldn't always be that free or that he couldn't always be that way with me. We heard a knock on the door and Chase immediately stopped playing as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn't. Bobby and Dean walked in holding hands.

"Are we still going out?" Bobby asked. She was starting to look like her old self again and her purple pajamas was replaced by a figure hugging orange dress.

"Yep, I'm starving," I said.

"Then let's go." Chase stood up with me.

We drove to a restaurant ten minutes away. It was a small place with a bar that extended from the one end of the room to the other and a few tables and chairs at the back. It was apparently more of a bar than a restaurant but it was the only place that we could find open considering the time. An hour after we had eaten burgers and fries, the lights were dimmed and a DJ appeared next to our table. Hordes of people suddenly started streaming in and the volume of the music went from inaudible to deafening.

"Wanna dance?" Bobby asked me

"I need something to drink first," I laughed.

"I got you covered," she said as Dean started walking toward us with a tray filled with green shots and other drinks.

She lined three drinks in front of me.

Chase grinned at the horrified expression on my face.

"Would you like to help me out? I asked him.

"I don't drink, remember?"

"What I remember is you stumbling past my room drunk a few months ago."

"Oh that," he said. "Some chick broke my heart and I tried to drown my sorrows, but realized that I actually don't have a stomach for it and that she likes me. So no more drinking for me, but hey, don't let me stop you," he chuckled.

I rolled my eyes at him and took the first one which was fine, but after the third one I had enough. "Let's go, B," I said and pulled her up.

We were barely on the dance floor when two guys came to dance with us and I nervously looked around to see where Chase was. He looked at me, the same time I saw him. "I'm okay," I mouthed to him.

That didn't do much to appease him, because he was glaring at the two guys and when one of them pulled me against them, Chase was carrying him outside by his t-shirt. "Hey man what the fuck is your problem!" he asked Chase.

I ran after him. "Chase, please don't!" I shouted.

Chase ignored me, "do you see those two women," he said and he pointed to Bobby and me, who was now also outside with Dean. "You leave them alone."

The guy pulled out of Chases gasp and dusted off his shirt. When he saw the rest of his friends coming outside, his expression changed from scared to brave and so did his tone.

"I will dance with who the fuck I want to," he seethed. And then to my horror he pulled out a knife, but Chase laughed at him.

"You better know how to use that," he warned.

"You will know once I cut your piece of shit face and take Pretty Legs home with me."

"Walk away man," Dean told Chase.

"Dean take them inside," Chase commanded without taking his eyes off his opponent.

"I'm not leaving you," he told Chase.

"You know I can handle myself, Dean, get them inside, I don't want anyone getting hurt"

"Let's go," Dean told us.

"If you think I am leaving him, you're insane. There are four of them and one of him," I said.

"Grace, trust me, it's better if you go. If he is distracted by you, it will do more harm than good."

Dean basically dragged me away, but I didn't allow him to pull me further than the door and I watched as Chase walked toward the guy with the knife. They all looked like a mob of dangerous bikers, with shaven heads and tattoos. They even sort of dressed the same, with off cut leather zip up jackets and black leather jeans. I started to tremble as I watched him walk toward Chase, he was almost the same size as him and just as muscular, not to mention his three friends behind him.

The guy jabbed the knife toward Chase's chest, but Chase swiftly moved to the side and slammed it out of his hand with his fist. Chase threw a punch into his side and then his face and the guy stumbled backward. All of his friends walked toward Chase after that, but he grabbed the one guy and flung him against the biggest one. After they went down, he took hold of the other guy and knocked him to the floor and before I knew it they were all running away.

"You better not show your face around here again," they warned Chase before they left.

He walked toward me and although I was relieved, I stared angrily at him. "What the fuck was that, Chase?"

"Those guys are dangerous Grace, I had to protect you."

"It didn't have to come to that, we were just dancing," I shouted.

"I'm sorry but..."

"Just take me home!" I interrupted him.

I sat in the back seat with Bobby when we drove home and there was a tense silence in the car. I didn't want to talk to Chase for the rest of the evening and went straight to my room as soon as the car stopped. I heard the front door opening an hour or so later and Bobby popped her head into my room.

"You doing okay?" Chica she asked me.

I sighed, "I'm not exactly sure."

She came into the room, kicked off her shoes and crawled into bed with me.

"I'm sorry Grace that was a real asshole move that Chase pulled."

"I don't even know where he learned to fight like that, seeing him that way was scary and if something happened to him..."

Bobby rubbed my arm, "Dean told me that Chase learned how to fight in juvie to protect himself. Did you know that he served time?" she asked me.

I nodded, I didn't want to get into that with her now.

"Apparently Dean saw him fighting a few times over the summer, but says he really calmed down since you came into his life," she said.

I suddenly felt bad for going off on him but I thought it would be best for me to speak about it to him in the morning.

***

The next morning, I was up early. I needed time alone in the art studio, maybe Aaron would come to me. Bobby was still asleep so I left her a note to tell her I would be back later.

When I walked into the studio I immediately put up a blank canvas and started painting. I kept on looking around to see if Aaron was there but he never came. A few hours later, I heard the door creak open, but I didn't look around, I knew that the only person who knew where I would be was Chase.

"Grace," he said cautiously. "Can we talk?"

"I don't think I'm ready yet Chase, what you did last night was really terrible. I tried to continue painting but my anger got the better of me and I spun around.

"Where did you learn to fight like that anyway?" I knew that Bobby already told me but I wanted to hear his version.

Chase put his hands in his pocket and hung his head. "In juvi, they wanted to teach us how to use our strength and anger in a constructive way. So we learned defensive techniques. But since it was juvi we also had to learn how to throw some serious punches to protect ourselves."

"Yeah well, you threw a lot more punches than was necessary last night," I said turning back around and furiously brushing the paint on the canvas.

"I know and I am sorry, Grace. I'm probably going to say that a lot because I will screw up a lot. I can't promise that I will change overnight and, Grace, if you want to leave now, I won't stand in your way."

I turned to look at his gloomy eyes. "Chase, we are going to have lots of fights and none of it is going to lead to me leaving you. Stop walking around as if the minute you turn your back, I am going to leave. You just have to ease up on the jealousy, I am yours and yours only," I said walking toward him and cupping his face.

"I know and you're right, just give me another chance."

I sighed. "You are forgiven, but I still need some time, so just let me paint these pictures and I will come back to the room."

"Thank you. All this is new to me and I am still learning, just be patient with me, I will get it right someday."

"It's new to me too, Chase."

"I know and I am sorry I let you see that side of me."

I nodded.

"I'll see you later," he said kissing my cheek.

I took another two hours to finish what I was doing and when I stepped back to survey it, I stared straight into Aaron's blue eyes. This was the fifth picture I had drawn of him this year, but it was the only one where I could see his face.

"Why do I look so sad in that painting?" I heard a voice behind me.

"Aaron," I smiled, "where have you been?"

"You don't need me here anymore, Gracy, and it's time that you let me go completely, at least me in this form."

"I'm not ready yet, Aaron."

"Grace, it is time to move on, I will always be a part of you. There is a great guy waiting for you and the only way you are going to help him, is if you are completely healed first."

"I know, I am just not ready. Just give me some more time."

" _It will be okay, Gracy_ ," he said and then he disappeared.

I walked back to my room with tears in my eyes, hoping that Aaron didn't just say goodbye to me. But he was right. I needed to let go, I just didn't know how.

When I stepped inside Chase was sitting on my sofa, staring at a blank TV screen.

"Hey," I said softly.

'Hi," he smiled up at me. "Bobby and Dean went out to get something to eat."

I walked over to him and sat down. "I'm sorry that I over reacted earlier, I know that things were hard for you before you came to WRC," I said placing my hands in his.

"Grace there is something else I didn't tell you. It's not exactly true that I learnt how to fight in juvie. When I was twelve years old I had to learn to dodge my father's hefty blows and by fifteen when I realized that I wasn't always missing them, I decided to do something.

I got some old weights from a sports shop and started bulking up. My dad never stood a chance after I became stronger, but it meant my mother was taking those extra punches."

"That's awful Chase," I exclaimed teary eyed.

"Watching him hit my mother like that made me so angry. She wouldn't let me intervene and the result was a temper always raging inside of me. I used to pick fights at school, on the street, anywhere I could find an outlet I would take it. But since you came into my life things have been different. I want to be better, but last night when that asshole grabbed you I just lost it."

"It's okay Chase," I said placing my hand on his face, "I didn't understand before, but I do now."

"I'm sorry you had to see that side of me."

"I just wished that you told me sooner."

"I know," he said as pulled me into his arms. "From now on I'll do better."

Chapter 11

The last term of the year, everyone had their noses stuck in a book, even The Bleeding hearts were doing less gigs. WRC had a serious policy about failing. One or two subjects they were okay with but you could not flunk an entire year or you would have to appear before the board. Chase came over to my place every night to check if I needed help with math and most nights he would fall asleep on my sofa.

One night after Chase had fallen asleep and I closed him with a blanket, my phone rang. When I checked I saw that it was my dad. I went to my room and closed the door.

"Hey, Dad," I whispered, "I am so happy to hear from you."

"Hi, honey, how are you? I miss you too."

"I'm really good," I told him.

"I'm glad to hear that, baby. I got a text from Cherry to say that she put the house in my name. Thank you for doing that and I'm sorry that you had to meet with her. What made her sign over the house so quickly anyway?"

"It must be the stern talking to I gave her," I lied. "I told her that you raised me alone and that house belonged to us. That must have done the trick."

"I am glad she didn't give you too much trouble. I have to board the ship now but I will be home for Christmas and I told Agatha and Chris to come over for lunch."

"Okay, Dad, I will see you soon, I love you."

"Love you too, honey, take care of yourself."

When my dad ended the call, I thought of taking Chase with me for lunch and how awkward it was going to be to let my boyfriend meet Agatha and Chris. I also needed to tell him everything before I did and I wasn't really looking forward to that.

"Was that your dad?" I heard Chase's voice behind me. I turned my head slightly and nodded. He came up to me and pulled my back against his stomach and held me close.

I turned to face him and folded my hands around his neck. "I'm so happy that you're here," I told him.

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere else, Gracy." I took my hands off his neck and walked to the other side of the room when he called me that.

"Did I say something wrong?"

I turned away. I wasn't ready to tell him about Aaron. But it wasn't fair for me to try and break down his walls, when I was still hiding a big part of myself.

I turned to look at him again, "I had a friend... Actually, he was more than that."

"A boyfriend?" Chase asked.

I shook my head. "He was my best friend. I was in love with him, yes, but he never knew. He rescued me from the dark life I was living and was the only friend I ever had."

"Was?" Chase asked.

"He..." My voice faltered.

Chase came close to me and held my hands.

"He died," I said as tears rolled down my cheeks.

Chase wiped my cheeks with his thumbs and wrapped his arms around me. I lay my head on his chest as my tears started rolling.

"He used to call me Gracy, ever since the ninth grade when I fell over a huge stone and twisted my ankle. He came running, picked me up and asked, "Gracy, are you okay?" and it stuck.

"I'm sorry," Chase said holding me tighter "if you don't like it..."

"No, it's not that. It just reminded me of him, but I actually don't think I mind. I think I like it, it feels familiar."

I wasn't ready to tell him more. Not yet anyway, so we lay down on the bed in silence, with his arms still bound tightly around me. When I eventually felt his arms loosen, I moved out of his grip and watched him sleep. There was a peaceful look on his face that I had never seen before. Maybe it was because I shared a part of myself that I never thought I would share with him. I was glad that I told him about Aaron and that we were slowly moving closer toward each other, bridging the gap of mistrust. I eventually fell asleep, watching his chest rise and fall, lulled by the rhythmic sound of his breaths.

*****

I heard a phone ringing somewhere in the distance and thought maybe I was dreaming. But then I felt Chase stir and him raising his voice outside the bedroom door.

I got up and walked to him as he put the phone down.

"Grace, I'm sorry to get up and leave like this. But I have to go," he said and headed for the door.

"Chase," I said grabbing his arm. "What's going on?"

He rubbed the back of his neck as if he was unsure about whether or not he should let me in this time.

I waited quietly for him to decide. I didn't want to push him.

"It's okay if you don't want to tell me right now."

"If you go with me, I can show you," he said.

I sighed softly, relieved that he trusted me enough, and nodded.

I got dressed as quick as I could and we walked to the car. The car ride was silent and tense until Chase started to speak. "Grace, I'm sorry for dragging you with without telling you where we're going."

He went quiet again and vigorously rubbed his forehead. "We're going to Rosewood to see my mother."

I didn't know what to make of that, he only mentioned his mother once and that memory was not a fond one. I only nodded and reached out to touch his hand.

We entered our home town and drove toward the mountainous side of Rosewood. When we neared the steel fencing I knew that we were at the Rosewood Mental Institution. Chase stopped in front of it, signed his name at security and drove inside. He pulled the car into a parking lot and after he switched it off, he sat quiet for a long time.

He eventually took a deep breath and turned to me. "My mother loved my father, so much in fact that she always had a reason as to why he hit her. She always blamed herself. The day he beat her unconscious, I called for an ambulance and she spent weeks in a hospital. I was at her side day and night. When she finally woke up I told her what had happened to my dad and that the police was waiting for her to wake up. They needed to hear her testimony. She lost her mind; she blamed me, called me a murderer. Luckily for me the doctor could act as my witness, because she had so many broken bones and bruises. Some of her broken bones were from years of torture and they knew she was a victim of abuse. The court deemed her to be in an unfit mental condition and a danger to herself, so they forced her to go to a mental institution. After she was admitted there she started to regress and is now a permanent resident of the hospital. I have not spoken to her in over a year and last night one of the nurses called me to say that she is hysterically looking for me. I told her that I had no interest in seeing her. She told me that my mother has tried to take her life several times and they are afraid that one day she will succeed and that perhaps it's time for me to say goodbye."

"Chase, that's... I'm so sorry," I said as I put my arms around him.

He kissed the top of my head, "let's get this over with."

"You want me to come with you?" I asked surprised.

"Only if you want to," he said.

"Of course, I do," I told him.

Chase slowly led me toward a glass front door and took another deep breath before he rang the bell. We heard a buzzer and he pushed the door open. We walked down a long wide corridor, toward a steel gate and there was a security guard standing next to it with a white uniform. "Your names, please?"

"Chase Ryder and Grace Delaney," Chase responded.

"Do you have an appointment?" the security guard asked.

Chase nodded.

Please wait here while I call for one of the nurses. He picked up a cordless phone and dialed a number and a few minutes later a lady in a white dress came walking toward us, her heels clicking on the shiny marble floor.

The security guard opened the gate with a key and the nurse addressed Chase. "Hello, thank you for coming. Will you please follow me?"

Chase took my hand and we followed the nurse into the reception area. It was a small area with two chairs and a table with magazines neatly stacked on top. "Pease wait here a moment," the nurse said and I watched as she walked into a nearby room.

A few minutes later, she came out of the room and back to us. "She is ready to see you now, please don't be alarmed by her restraints; she has been behaving erratically over the past few weeks. One of the nurses will be close by in case you need assistance."

Chase walked into the room and I followed cautiously behind him. The room was not very spacious, it had a single bed with blue sheets on top, a white tray was placed next to it and a window overlooking the garden had iron burglar bars in it. His mother was sitting on a brown rocking chair, her arms were strapped to it with white cloth. Her honey blonde hair looked like it hadn't been washed in a few weeks and she wore a stained white night gown. She looked up and smiled broadly when she heard us come in and I noticed that Chase inherited his brown, serious looking eyes from her.

"Chase, my sweet, sweet boy, I have missed you so much."

"Hello, Mother," he said coldly and stood at a distance from her.

She moved her head to the side trying to look around him at me.

"And who is this beautiful young woman you have brought with you?"

I stepped out from behind Chase. "Hi, I'm Grace." I tried to smile, even though I was shocked to see her tied to a chair.

"Well now, Chase has never brought a girl home. This must be serious."

"Why have you been calling for me?" Chase asked her bluntly.

Her eyes went from sparkling to sullen in seconds and her voice took on a whiny tone. "I need your help," she sulked. "I need you to ask the doctor to give me less meds, they're making me coo-coo," she said and stuck out her bottom lip.

"This is a state hospital that you have been sentenced to, Mom. I can't do anything about your meds," Chase said through his teeth.

"Will you at least get your daddy to come speak to them for me," she pleaded.

"You know that he is dead," Chase hissed.

She looked as if she was about to cry and then she turned toward the window. She stayed like that for a few seconds and then turned back to Chase; her expression was one of anger this time.

"Oh yes, that's right you killed him." She started raising her voice, "you killed the love of my life you selfish, good for nothing bastard."

Chase said nothing.

She started shaking her head madly. "You ruined my life! Ruined my life! Ruined my life!" she screamed.

One of the nurses came running past us and I took Chase by his hand. "Let's get out of here."

"That's right," we could her screaming from her room. "Just keep on running you piece of shit and never come back!"

Chase increased his speed as we walked to the car and he slammed his fist on the hood when we got there. "I don't know why I came, I don't know what I was expecting," he said.

I walked toward him and lifted his chin, but he kept his eyes averted.

"Look at me, Chase," I said. When he did I could see the tears building in his eyes, I could see how much she had broken him. I didn't have the words to console him in that moment; my mother was just as messed up as his. But I wanted him to know that he didn't need her anymore, he had me and I loved him. I put my hand on his cheek and his eyes softened. He pulled me into his arms and I knew that was all he needed. To know that there was someone who understood his pain and who would never stop loving him.

We eventually climbed back into the car and drove home. It was a quiet drive but the tension of earlier had disappeared.

We walked to my room when we got home and he stopped me as I was about to open the door. He turned me toward him and stared into my eyes, his own eyes glistening with tears.

"Is everything okay, Chase?"

"I don't know how I would have done this without you. I spent so much time pushing people away that I never realized how much I needed this. To let someone in and show them the darkest parts of your soul."

"I don't think I say this often enough...I love you, Grace Delaney, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me."

I responded by folding my arms around his neck. "I love you too, Chase Ryder," I said before pressing my lips to his.

"Don't ever go anywhere," he said against my mouth.

"I'm right here, Chase, you don't have to worry about me leaving."

He sighed softly.

I turned around and opened the door. "Are you staying over?"

"If I'm wanted here," he smiled.

"Mmm, I'll have to think about that," I told him.

"Well, if you do decide that I can stay I am taking the sofa; lying next to you is becoming too hard for me."

"Sure, I'll get you some pillows," I told him.

I went to the closet and thought about how glad I was that Chase was being patient with me. We both had so many issues, so much emotional growing up we had to do and wounds that needed healing, that waiting was the best thing we could have done. And I loved him more for it; I knew that he had to exercise a lot of restraint.

I walked back inside with a blanket and pillow but Chase was fast asleep. I covered him and watched him sleep. He looked as content as before and I was relieved that he was finally dealing with the demons of his past.

I switched off the lights and walked into my room when my phone started buzzing in my pocket. I pulled it out; there was a message from an unknown number. I opened it and my heart started racing as I saw a picture of my mother. She was sitting on a cemented floor, her hands tied with rope. She had black smudges below her eyes, which meant that she had been crying. Another message came through straight after that and my hands started to tremble as I read it.

Grace Baby, your mother is in trouble again and she needs your help. I'm sure you don't want me to send you her remains. I'm having a little show on the 2nd December near my country estate in Glengarry. Why don't you take a drive down and we can work something out. If you don't... Consider your mother's blood on your hands. Show starts at 7, so don't be late. See you soon my little gem.

I blinked a few times, I couldn't believe my eyes. Then my hands started to tremble as the full weight of the situation hit me. I walked around my room, thinking about whether or not I should tell Chase. I shook my head; I didn't want him involved with this. I needed to speak to Aaron. I closed the door and called him softly, hoping he would come but he never showed. I got into bed fully clothes and after a few hours of tossing and turning I decided that sleeping was not an option for me tonight. I knew what I had to do; I knew what Aaron and Chase would say but was I really ready to let my mother die?

Who was I kidding; she hadn't been my mother for a long time. I didn't owe her anything. But was I really that person? Could I be the reason she ended up dead, even though I had the power to stop it? I swallowed a lump in my throat when I realized that this time I needed to stay far away from this; Jerry would never stop if I gave in to him. He would always use my mother and she would always let him use her. I knew this was the right decision; I just needed to stick with it. I got up from my bed, went to Chase and curled up next to him on the sofa.

"Grace," he whispered opening his eyes, "you okay?"

''I am now," I said snuggling into his arms. He kissed the top of my head and I eventually fell asleep, feeling safe in his arms.

Chapter 12

Exams had come and gone and Bobby left a day before college was scheduled to close to go make things right with her father. Apparently, he came to terms with her dating Dean and wanted to apologize. Chase and I decided to stay at college until a week before Christmas, it was more my idea than his. I needed more time to tell him about Aaron before I introduced him to Chris and Agatha. The night before our last day of classes, Chase came over. He sat on the sofa while I made us chicken and mayo sandwiches. "You coming to our gig tonight?" he asked.

"Actually, if you don't mind I would like to do the final touches to my painting. We have to hand it in tomorrow. Besides it's your last gig of the year and it's going to be packed."

"If you're worried about that, you can wait for me backstage," he offered.

"It's not that. What I mean is that it's going to be packed with girls in short skirts, throwing you their underwear and trying to grope you. Don't think I can stomach that."

He stood and walked toward me. "Baby, you don't have to worry, I won't allow any of them near me."

I didn't find much comfort in that. "I really need to finish my painting for Miss Demerol. She needs it tomorrow to add the grade of the painting to our final grade."

He pulled me against his warm body and kissed me softly. "Wait up for me," he said.

"I will," I told him and he grabbed a sandwich as he left.

When I was done eating mine, I walked over to the art studio. It was quiet outside; only a slight breeze was rustling the trees. Everyone who hadn't gone home for the holidays yet had obviously gone to see The Bleeding Hearts. When I walked into the studio, I switched on the lights and put my hand over my heart as I looked at all my paintings hanging on the wall.

''I hope yer don't mind," I heard a voice behind me. It was Andy. "They were too bonnie to be stashed away," he said.

''I love it, thank you, Andy."

He nodded his head and left.

Most of the paintings were of Aaron, he seemed so real in all of them and I really did love it. I thought that I was finally ready to tell Chase about him.

I took out the painting that was due the next day and put it on the easel. I decided to paint a picture of two people who were standing at the opposite end of canvas and they were blindfolded. They were trying to reach for each other's hands. There was also a wall coming down behind them. I added some more color and effects, which took me a few hours and then I stepped back to survey it.

Painting the picture was easy; the hard part was coming up with a description and knowing that it was a window to my past. I stood with a pen in my hand for a few minutes, knowing what I wanted to write, didn't make it any easier. Finally. I started to write it down; I titled the painting, 'When the walls come down.'

"Wow," Chase said behind me, I thought you couldn't be more amazing, but that painting..."

I turned around and smiled, ''thank you."

He walked toward me with his eyes fixed on the painting, "I assume this painting is about me somehow?"

I blushed, "it's about both of us," I said.

"And all the others that you were hiding from me, I see that they are up on the wall, can I look at them now?" he asked.

It was time for me to tell him everything about Aaron. I nodded and my body stiffened as I watched him look at the first painting I did of Aaron. It was the first one of him I did with his back toward me. Chase turned to me. "Is this him?"

"Yes," I whispered.

He walked around the room looking at all of them where you could only see Aaron's back and then he went to the other side of the room and looked at the painting I did of Aaron facing me. It was directly under the skylight and it made Aaron's blue eyes sparkle. He stood there for a few minutes, staring at this one the longest and then he stepped back suddenly. "Aaron Wheeler was your friend that died?''

How did he know Aaron? I wondered as I walked toward him. I mean of course he did, Aaron was the most popular guy at school.

Chase fell to his knees and I went to kneel next to him. "Chase?" I asked, alarmed. "What's going on?"

''I don't know how I missed it before. It was so obvious."

"What was obvious, what did you miss?" I asked.

He looked at me with tears in his eyes and I thought I knew the answer before he told me.

Chase started to tremble, "I... He... He was the boy... The night of the accident, my dad woke up in the back seat and started fighting with me, choking me. I lost control of the car and before I could stop, I saw the lights of another car and..."

I stood up as the tears rolled down my face. "You? It was you who killed him?"

"I'm sorry, Grace, I didn't know it was him."

We looked at each other, both knowing that this had severed our relationship forever.

"Grace, please..." he pleaded, "It was an accident."

I shook my head, it couldn't be true.

Chase stood up and took my hand, "Grace, please say something."

I jerked my hand away from him and stepped back as I looked at him angrily. "You killed him," I whispered again.

He said nothing. There was nothing that could save us now. I turned around and walked away. "Grace, where are you going?" Chase called after me.

I turned back to look at him, "just stay away from me, Chase, I don't ever want to see you again," I choked and ran to my room.

As soon as I was in my room I ran to get my laptop. I never wanted to know anything about what happened that night. I told everyone that I would rather not hear the details and look where it got me. My ignorance caused me to fall in love with the man who killed my best friend.

I scrolled through Rosewood's library archives until I found the one I was looking for, the headline read: _Teen kills fellow student in a car crash_

I stood up and paced the room, I wasn't ready to know. I wasn't ready to read the graphic details of how he died but I knew I had to. I forced myself to sit down and read further. My hands were trembling as I scrolled down.

Chase Ryder, a former student at Rose Valley High was driving his father to a local jail in Rosewood, after a domestic violence episode erupted in their home. His drunken father woke up in the back seat while his son was driving and tried to strangle the teenager, causing him to collide with another vehicle. The driver of the other vehicle, Aaron Wheeler, died on impact, along with Chase's father. Chase Ryder was rushed to the hospital and miraculously suffered only minor injuries.

I skimmed through the rest of it not being able to read more of the gory details, until I saw Agatha and Chris's name.

The parents of the deceased, Agatha and Chris Wheeler, said that they forgave Chase Ryder because that was what their son would have wanted. Mr. Ryder was unwilling to give a comment after the death of his fellow student and father. The incident was ruled as an accident by the court.

I snapped the laptop shut. In that moment, I was so angry with Chase. I didn't care that it was an accident. I never wanted to see him again.

I ran to my closet and pulled out my black suitcase. I threw all my clothes into it and sobbed while doing it. I needed to get away from WRC as soon as possible. I never heard Chase come back to his room and I was relieved that he stayed away. I zipped my bag closed and headed for the door, as my tears blinded me. I put my suitcase in my car when I realized that I forgot my handbag with my phone in the room and as I turned around to go back, a black SUV pulled up next to me. When I tried to go around it, one of the tinted windows rolled down and when I looked up, to my horror Jerry was smiling back at me.

"Jerry!" I gasped.

"Why don't you get in, Grace?" he said still smiling.

I turned around and ran but I didn't get very far when I felt two big arms envelope me and lift me up from the ground. I kicked and screamed until he threw me into the back seat with Jerry. I looked around in the car for a handle, but there wasn't one. I rubbed my hands on the black leather interior to see if there was a hidden lock but I didn't find anything.

"Help, someone help me!"

Jerry started laughing. "They can't help you, sweet cheeks. Nobody can hear you."

I folded my arms and stared Jerry down. "What the fuck do you want from me, Jerry?"

"Now, now, Grace. There is no need to be rude." He smirked. "I told you I need your help."

"And my answer is no!"

"I thought you might say that, so I decided to come and collect my gem myself."

"I don't belong to you, Jerry and I sure as hell don't want to be involved with your shit."

"Well, it looks like you don't have a choice, so you better behave yourself."

"Just tell me what you want and let me go!"

"Everything will be revealed to you soon, just sit back and enjoy the ride."

We drove for just over an hour and my heart was beating like crazy in my chest the entire time. I tried to take note of the route that we were driving on and memorized any minute detail on the way. Jerry spent most of the time texting on his phone and drinking glasses of wine which he offered to me and I refused. I didn't know what Jerry was going to do to me and I was more afraid than I had ever been in my life.

We eventually exited the city and reached a dirt road and then another two hours until we reached a large iron gate. The security guard at the entrance opened the gate and we drove down a long driveway toward a three story house. Which I assumed was Jerry's estate he wanted me to come to.

Someone opened the door for me and I tried not to tremble as I climbed out. I looked at the brick house, which was more like a mansion, it was surrounded by acres of trees and not a single other house in sight.

A maid with black and white uniform appeared on top of a set of steps which was by the front door. She looked to be middle-aged, with short curly hair. "Please follow me, Miss," she addressed me.

The house had a country feel to it, with taxidermy and rifles on the wall. It had high wooden ceilings and wooden chandeliers. I followed her up to the second floor which had a long white carpet and into a bedroom at the end of the long passage. She opened the door and I walked inside. The room had ceiling to floor curtains, which were red and gold. The ceiling to my horror had mirrors on them and there was a large bed against the wall next to the window.

"There are towels in the closet," the maid said, turning in the direction of a long brown cupboard. "Your linen will be changed every day. Please ring the bell next to your bed if you need anything," she said and walked out.

I ran to the window and opened the curtains. The window was huge; extending from the floor to the ceiling and wall to wall. I could see the entire estate through it. It was heavily guarded outside; at least ten men were roaming the grounds.

I climbed on the bed and hugged my knees. I was never getting out of here and even if I did, it wouldn't be alive. Nobody would even think to look for me for weeks. I told Chase that I never wanted to see him again and since Agatha thought I was only coming a week before Christmas, they wouldn't think anything either. I hoped that she would try to call me and notice that something was amiss. But our calls to each other were less frequent lately.

I didn't sleep that night, I couldn't. So I stayed awake and thought about my life. How did I end up here? Then I thought about Chase and about Aaron. I was such a fool and I felt like I betrayed Aaron. Not only because I fell in love with Chase but because I was still in love with him, even though I knew what he did. Even though I knew that he was responsible for killing my best friend.

Chapter 13

Early the next morning there was a knock on my door and the maid walked in. "Good morning, miss, your presence is requested by Jerry in the eating room."

"And if I refuse to go?"

She didn't answer and stepped aside for a guard with a large muscular frame. I realized that he must have been guarding my door the whole night.

"Jerry is waiting," he said sternly.

I got up from the bed with the same clothes I had on the night before. I didn't bother to brush my hair or change my clothing, although I saw the maid bringing in my suitcase last night.

I followed the guard up to the third floor, into a lounge area. I saw Jerry through glass doors sitting on an enclosed balcony. He was just as muscular as the guard who had brought me to him. When I walked onto the balcony, he looked up from a gun that he was polishing and I knew that it was a scare tactic. But I also knew that he wanted me for something, so I wasn't on his hit list yet and knowing that gave me the upper hand.

"Grace," he greeted, smiling. "Please sit down."

I remained standing and refused to make eye contact with him.

"As you can see, I have been nothing but kind to you and there is nothing to be afraid of."

"And I suppose you were really cleaning that gun," I glared at him.

He waved the gun around. "I have other people who I need to keep in line."

"What do you want, Jerry? I am not interested in your games."

He pushed a white page toward me. "I have a proposition for you."

I skimmed my eyes over the page and looked away.

"You sign this contract, making me your manager and you can still go to college as normal. You will only have to fly out once a month for a gig. You don't have to live in your mother's shadow anymore. I can make you a star. Now doesn't that sound like a dream come true?"

I thought of signing the contract so that I could get out of there. But nothing was that simple with Jerry. Signing that contract would mean selling my soul to the devil and my only redemption would be in death.

"Not interested," I said.

I could see him turning red and he stood up and leaned forward on the table. "Grace, you better get to terms with what is going on here, I can make you do whatever I want. You are the last person I need to be telling this to, you know exactly what I am capable of, especially when I am angry."

I started to feel my knees becoming weak, but I kept my composure.

"Take her out of my sight," he told the guard and the guard grabbed my arms and pulled me away.

I jerked my arm free and walked toward him again. "Where is Cherry?" I asked.

Jerry laughed. "You have some balls kid, I'll give you that. You'll see her soon enough," he said. "Now get out of my sight, I have things to do."

I walked back to my room and slammed the door; I needed to think of ways to escape. I took a shower and got dressed in black sweat pants and a gray top. I decided to look around my room for anything I could use as a weapon. I checked under the bed but there was nothing and the cupboards were bare. I heard someone knock on the door and quickly ran to sit on my bed. The maid walked in with a tray. "Here is your lunch," she said placing it on a table. "You don't have to sit cooped up in this room you know, you are welcome to roam the ground and Tony will accompany you." I assumed Tony was the guard at the door. I didn't answer her and she left.

" _I think that is a good idea,"_ I heard a voice and quickly turned around.

"Aaron!" I nearly screamed.

"You got yourself in a pretty bad situation here, Grace."

"I know!" I cried. "I don't think I'm ever getting out, but I'm so glad to see you here. I'd hug you so hard right now, if you weren't a ghost."

"You can't think like that, Gracy. You have to do everything you can to get out of here safely."

"I am, I've been racking my brain the whole morning, and there's no way out of here. Even if I did get out, I don't even know how far from civilization this place is."

"Maybe you should start with taking a walk around the grounds and familiarizing yourself with your surroundings," Aaron suggested.

"That's a good idea," I said. "And please don't leave my side, Aaron."

" _I won't,"_ he told me.

I put on my shoes and a jacket and walked to the door.

"Grace," Aaron stopped me. "I really think you should eat first."

"Seriously, Aaron, eating is the least of my concerns right now."

"You need to keep your strength if you're going to fight him."

"You're right," I said grabbing the sandwich and gulping it down.

I opened the door and stepped outside, turning toward the long passage which led to the glass staircase.

"Where are you going?" the guard who I assumed was Tony, asked me.

"For a walk," I said bluntly.

I continued walking and he followed me out through the front door. Outside the air was crisp and I took a deep breath with my eyes closed. That was the most freedom I'd felt since Jerry brought me here. I walked along the paved pathway and then stepped onto the grass, going around to the back of the house. I walked past a large pool in the backyard, which had a seating area next to it. Beyond the yard were rows of what looked like apple trees. I decided to go pick one, so that I could see where it led to. When I walked past the last apple tree, I walked straight into a barb wired fence.

"Shit," I cursed, frustrated. I looked around to see where Tony was; I didn't want him to get suspicious. He was walking at a distance from me but close enough for him to watch my every move.

I turned to Aaron, who was still next to me. "I don't think I'm getting out of here." I felt a lump forming in my throat.

"Don't give up, Grace. It's your first day here. You will get your chance eventually, besides he has to take you out sometime if he wants you to sing."

"That's right," I said, feeling a glimmer of hope. "But let's not talk here," I whispered to him.

"I forgot, you don't want to look like a crazy person talking to a ghost."

"No, I don't care how crazy they think I am. I don't want them to hear what we're planning. Let's go back to the room and discuss it there."

My mind was running rampant as I walked up to the room; there was a chance I could actually get out of here alive.

Aaron sat on the bed and watched me pace the room.

"So how are you going to do it?" Aaron asked.

"I'm not sure yet, I have to check out the venue where I will be performing first, maybe I can get ahold of someone to help me. Of course, I have to do it without Jerry knowing or he'll just have the person killed. But one thing is for sure, I have to try something. Now, all I have to do is wait for the first show."

****

I waited for three days, and in that time, I didn't seen Jerry once. One chilly Friday afternoon, the maid came into my room and said that Jerry was waiting outside for me.

I wanted to tell Aaron that the time had finally come, but he wasn't with me today yet. I walked to the car, nervous and fearful. Jerry was already inside when I climbed in.

"Good morning, Grace, I should have told you to put on something pretty," he said, looking at my unkempt appearance.

"I assume I'm going to sing at your show today," I grunted.

"Not today," he grinned. "I wanted to show you something else."

We drove for about five minutes and then the car stopped. I looked out the window and saw a wooden house with a guard standing next to it.

"Get out," Jerry commanded.

I climbed out and looked around. There was nothing there either; the wooden cottage was surrounded by trees.

"What is this?" I asked.

"Go see for yourself," he said, nodding in the direction of the cottage.

My knees were trembling as I walked toward it; I imagined the worse, like my mother's corpse rotting inside.

I stood at the door unable to go in, until the guard opened the door and shoved me inside.

There was fire cackling inside and the cottage looked tidy. I looked toward the kitchen and recognized the auburn haired woman standing at the window. She turned to face me when the floor board creaked underneath my feet.

"Grace, baby," she ran to me and wrapped her arms around me.

I stepped out of her clutches and immediately noticed that she looked... different. Her eyes were brighter than usual.

"What am I doing here, Cherry?" I asked her. "How could you do this to me, you ruined my life!" I hissed.

"Grace, I swear to you, I had nothing to do with this. Jerry called me and asked me to get you to do a gig and I refused. He offered me a whole lot of drugs in exchange and to be honest, baby I was real tempted. But I have been clean for a while now and I wasn't going back to that life so I said no. I even got me a job in the city, but one evening after work Jerry got hold of me and brought me here. He told me that I had to get you to sing for him on a permanent basis, but I refused."

"So why can't you do the gigs for him?" I asked.

"I tried that, baby, I told him that he could have me instead of you but he said I was washed up trash and you were the rising star. I am sorry about this, Grace, it is all my fault and I wanted to make it right by not involving you."

We heard the door opening and we both looked around. Jerry stood in the doorway, grinning like a mad man.

"How I love family reunions," he said. "See, Grace, your mother is fine."

Cherry stepped in front of me. "Jerry, she doesn't deserve this, why don't you leave her alone? Do with me whatever you want."

"I already told you, Cherry, I don't want anything from you," he said, pushing my mother to the side. "It's sweet little Grace I want for myself."

"Jerry, if you do anything to hurt her I swear, I will kill you!" my mother screamed.

I was so shocked at what was happening, I never saw my mother like that before.

"Hush now," Jerry said, putting a finger to his lips. "Have I not been treating the two of you well? In fact, to make things even sweeter," he looked at me, "I will allow scheduled visits with your mother. Think of it as my way of saying sorry for robbing you of her, for all those years," he sneered.

I wanted to spit in his face, he was disgusting!

"Time to go, Grace," he said as he walked out.

Cherry pulled me in for a hug as I was about to leave. "I will get you out of here, baby, I promise."
Chapter 14

The next day, Tony came into my room and asked me about which days I wanted to see my mother. I didn't look at or answer him, and he left. I didn't know if I wanted to see Cherry; I didn't trust her because there was a chance that she was a part of all this. But at the back of my mind, I knew that couldn't be true. She was a different person. I could see it when I looked at her and the way she acted when she saw me was so unlike her. I needed to speak to Aaron before I made any decisions, but he hadn't shown himself in two days.

Late Saturday evening as I was about to drift off to sleep, I turned around and saw Aaron lying next to me. "Aaron," I whispered. "Where have you been?"

"Only you can bring me here, Grace and I only appear when you really need me."

"Well, I asked you not to leave my side, so clearly I need you here all the time," I snapped.

"Apparently not," he retorted.

"Anyway," I said breathing heavily. "I saw Cherry yesterday and it seems Jerry has her locked up too."

"Seriously?" Aaron's eyes went wide. "What is he playing at?"

"Your guess is as good as mine, but Cherry told me that she had nothing to do with this and in a weird way I believed her. But this could also be a very elaborate plan cooked up by the two of them."

Aaron nodded. "Could be."

"Jerry also told me that he would allow me scheduled visits with my mother, but I don't know if seeing her is a good idea. That's what I needed to talk to you about, what do you think I should do?"

"That's a tough one," Aaron said, stroking his chin. "It would be a good idea to meet with her because if she and Jerry are in this together, you could figure out exactly what he wants from you and where he plans to go with this. But you can only do that if you're ready to spend time with her. Things are going to come up that you left behind years ago."

"I know," I sighed.

I already knew what I wanted to do; I just needed Aaron to echo it.

****

The next morning, after I had eaten breakfast, I got dressed and walked outside my room. Tony was standing upright as if he were guarding the queen. "I want to go see my mother," I told him.

He didn't look at me as he took out a two-way radio and pressed a black button on the top. _"_ Uniform 1, this is Alpha 1, do you copy? Over _."_

"Alpha 1, this is Uniform 1, over."

"Uniform 1, I am dispatching the package, standby, over."

"Rodger that Alpha 1, over and out."

A chill ran over my body as I listened to them. That was definitely confirmation that Jerry was more than serious about keeping me here.

"Come with me," Tony said.

I followed him outside and was surprised when he walked past the car.

"Aren't we going with the car?" I asked

"We're walking," he grunted.

He walked toward a gravel path and we stayed on that path for about five minutes, until we reached a row of bushes. We cut through the bushes and when we were on the other side, I saw the cottage my mother was being held in.

When I walked in, Cherry was sitting in a rocking chair, watching something on TV. She turned around when she heard her door opening. "Hello, baby," she said, quickly getting up and hugging me. "I'm so glad to see you're okay." She held me by my shoulders to assess me from head to toe.

"Did you eat anything yet? I can make some pancakes."

"You cook?" I asked, surprised.

"You know I was your mother before..."

"I ate already," I told her trying to break the awkward moment.

"I'm so happy you decided to visit me, baby, do you want to sit down and watch a movie?"

"Cherry, this is not your moment for salvation; you missed that chance a long time ago," I said bluntly.

"I know, baby, I know I missed out on everything. I was not myself and I know I can't make up for any of that. But I have you here now and I don't know how long this will last. For now, we just have each other."

I couldn't argue with that logic, it was a cruel world and Jerry could kill us both at any time.

"How about a walk?" Cherry offered.

I nodded.

We walked out through the front door and found Tony and another guard who I assumed was Uniform 1, waiting for us.

"We're going for a walk," Cherry said. "I would appreciate it if you kept your distance."

We walked on the grass toward a pond, the silence filling the air. I didn't know what to say, the woman walking next to me was a complete stranger. At least this version of her was.

We stopped at a lake and Cherry picked up a stone and drove it into the water, it bounced a few times before it sank. "Remember how we used to do this near the lake by the house? You used to think it was so much fun back then."

"I don't remember much of you being a doting mother, Cherry."

She turned away and looked at the water. "Before I got involved with Jerry, I loved you and your father more than anything. I was working as a teller at the bank and your father could see that I was not happy doing that. One night when we went out for dinner, we saw a poster for an open mic night the following week."

She sighed as she turned back to me.

"Your father encouraged me to go, he knew how much I loved to sing and I agreed. The night of the open mic I met Jerry, he offered me a singing contract, all sorts of other things and said that he would pay me more than I was making at the bank. I was so excited but your father he had a suspicion that Jerry was trouble and told me no. I convinced him that this was our chance, that I could handle Jerry. I havenever been more wrong in my life.

Anyway, your father finally agreed and then the trouble started.

We never realized how strenuous it would be working for Jerry. I hardly saw the two of you. So when I wanted to take a break Jerry got nasty with me, said that I would lose everything that I owned if I didn't work for him. After a few months, he saw that I was unhappy, so he offered me the drugs, said it would make me feel better about things. At first, I said no but I was so unhappy, I felt like I was trapped and your father and I were fighting all the time. So eventually I took it and after the first hit..." she stopped talking for a moment as if she was catching her breath.

"Well, you know what happened next, I was never the same after that."

I said nothing, I actually felt kind of sad for all that she had been through, my dad never told me any of this. Maybe she never told him either.

We heard someone come up behind us, it was Tony. "Your time is up," he told us. As we walked back to her cottage so many things were running through my mind, so many things I finally understood. My mother did love us, something which I would never have believed unless I heard its straight from the horse's mouth.

When we arrived back at the cottage, Cherry pulled me in for a hug as I was about to leave. "Keep your head up, baby, we will get out of here soon."

I tried to give her a small smile. I wanted to forgive her but my anger ran deep and I didn't think I ever could.

As I walked back to the house, Aaron appeared next to me _. "So how did it go with Cherry?"_ I looked behind me; Tony always kept a few hundred feet away from me, so I was comfortable talking to Aaron about my intimate encounter with my mother.

"It was strange," I said.

"How so?" Aaron asked.

"She explained to me that she wanted to get away from Jerry, but he was threatening her and I think ultimately what became of her was as a result of her trying to protect me and my father."

"Interesting," Aaron said.

"I know, I am still shocked at everything she told me," I said. "I thought meeting with her would be a bad idea, but I am kind of glad that I did."

"I am too, you deserve to know the truth." Aaron smiled.

When I stepped in through the front door, the maid was waiting for me, "Jerry wants to meet with you in the seating area outside."

I walked through the wide hallway with its polished white tiles into the backyard where Jerry was sitting, smoking a cigar.

He put out his cigar when he saw me and stood up. "I trust you enjoyed your time with your mother," he grinned.

"Is there something you needed?" I asked curtly.

"Your first gig is this Saturday; you will do the same set you did at the Vive. Everyone thinks they're going to see Cherry and when I drop the bomb that you are her daughter..." He burst out laughing and it scared me. I wondered what exactly he was playing at.

He stopped laughing abruptly. "There is a guitar in your room in case you need practicing, but I doubt that you do." He winked as if we were friends. "Your wardrobe had been filled with dresses," he continued. "Choose whichever one you want. Now leave me," he barked.

I turned around and as I was about to walk back into the house, he called my name and I stopped. "Grace! You better not try to pull any shit. You might not care about your mother, or your own life for that matter, but I know that you will do anything for your good for nothing father."

I stormed up to my room with tears burning my eyes; whatever plans I had to get someone to help me at the gig was over. As long as Jerry could hold the people I loved over me, I would be his captive forever. I lay down on my bed and sobbed. He had done to me, what he had done to Cherry.
Chapter 15

The day before my first gig, I went to see Cherry; she was pacing up and down when I walked inside.

"Baby," she sighed as she came to hug me, something I was still not used to. "I heard that you're performing tomorrow night," she whispered.

"We have to work on a plan to get you out when you're there."

I shook my head. "Jerry already told me, if I try any funny business, he is going to hurt Dad."

"That bastard is trying to pull the same shit with you! He is not going to get away with this."

Tony knocked on the door. "Time to go."

I swung the door open. "I haven't even been here five minutes," I told him.

"Jerry's orders, he doesn't want you distracted before the show."

"It's okay, baby," Cherry told me. "You will be okay, I promise." We looked at each other both knowing that there wasn't much I could do.

She pulled me into her arms again. "Just try your best to get out and be careful," she whispered.

I nodded and walked back to Jerry's house, I wasn't sure if me trying to escape was a good idea, since my dad was involved.

When I walked into the room, Aaron was waiting for me, looking out through the window. He turned around and smiled when he saw me. "You doing okay?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Everything is so messed up. I am never getting out of here and I keep thinking even if I do, what is waiting out there for me? I lost you and things between Chase and me are ruined. I don't know where to go to from here."

Aaron came to sit next to me on the bed. "Grace, you know I will always be with you, no matter where you go, and do you want to know what I think about this situation with Chase?"

"Well, since you are just a reflection of what I am thinking anyway, please go ahead."

"You need to give him another chance. The fact that he was driving that car doesn't change anything, he is a good guy and he loves you. And the reason why you fell in love with him is not because he needed saving. You wanted to do that, because you already loved him."

"But how can I love the man who killed you?

Did it really have to be him?"

"Would you have wanted it to be anyone else?"

I didn't answer that, after Aaron died I was so sure that I would never fall in love again. But Chase was different; he was so much like Aaron, even though he tried to portray someone different to the world.

"I fell in love with Chase because he was so much like you and that wasn't fair," I said.

Aaron shook his head. "You didn't fall in love with him because you thought he was like me. You fell in love with him because he comes from a very dark place, his father was scum and through it all, he is still a good person. He didn't become his fate. He's not like me, Gracy, he is like you."

Tears started rolling down my cheeks, Aaron was right. "It doesn't matter anyway; I am never getting out of here."

"You will get out of here, Gracy, just keep fighting."

***

Since I didn't get much sleep, I was lying awake when I heard a bunch of people outside my door and I sat up. There was a knock and the maid walked in. ""here are a few people here to get you ready for the show, ma'am."

"Ready?" I asked.

She nodded and opened the door wider. A short, bald headed man walked in holding a black bag. He set it on the dressing table and surveyed me. "You won't need much," he smiled, trying to be friendly.

"Please have a seat," he said pulling out a chair. I reluctantly got up and sat down in the chair opposite the mirror. He fluffed up my hair and put a small amount of makeup on. "Perfect," he said as he stood back and looked at me. He gathered his items and left the lipstick on the dresser before he walked out, shutting the door behind him. There was another knock.

A tall woman walked in with a black brief case. She wore a short blue dress and bright red lipstick. Her blond hair was pulled backed and she looked like she underwent a lot of plastic surgery in her life time. She placed the briefcase on the dresser. "Choose anything you like," she smiled with Botox filled lips. She walked out and closed the door behind her. I wondered if these people knew I was being held captive and briefly thought about asking her for help but I knew that was a bad idea.

I opened the briefcase and found neck pieces and earrings made entirely of white diamonds.

"We're leaving in thirty minutes," I heard Tony say from the other side. I walked to the long brown cupboard, slid it open and a light immediately came on. It was a lot bigger inside than what I had expected. There were about twenty different dresses hanging on a rail and they were a lot more sparkly than what I cared for. I went through them looking for the most inconspicuous one, which was a long white dress, with a few diamonds around the rounded neckline. It had a long slit on the one side and a satin feel to it. I slipped it over my head and found that it hugged my body as if it were made for me. I put on a pair of nude high heels and walked outside.

"I am ready," I told Tony.

We walked downstairs and a limo was waiting outside. I was relieved to see that Jerry was not inside when I got in.

We drove for over an hour and when we stopped and Tony opened the door, I was excited to see a few buildings and apartments. There were still lots of trees surrounding it, it looked like it was a closed off community, but I still had hope that perhaps there might be someone who could save me after all.

When I walked further, I noticed a long red carpet rolled out and walked onto it toward a set of heavy brass doors. There wasn't a soul in site and my hopes started to diminish. If I was going to get help, I needed to make contact with some people. I followed Tony up a staircase and walked to the back of the stage. I peeked behind the royal blue curtain and saw that the auditorium was an intimate one; it seated roughly about three hundred people. Cherry's gigs were usually three times the size. There were few people seated already and I wondered if I should try to get their attention or shout for help, but that seemed too risky. I needed more witnesses. I knew that my dad's life was in danger, but if I could get out of here, I could get to him in time.

My head was running wild with ways to get out of there; I hardly noticed the page that someone stuffed in my hands. I eventually looked down at it and it was a list of Cherry's songs that I usually did. I still hadn't seen Jerry since I got here and that made me more nervous. I needed to know where he was. I needed to factor everything into my poorly planned escape. _Maybe it was a bad idea_ , I thought as I hugged myself. But I needed to try something; I was not going to remain Jerry's prisoner.

Eventually, I saw the room in the auditorium darken and someone testing the microphone. A few moments later, I heard a woman speaking. "Good evening everyone, thank you all for coming. I know that you were expecting someone else but tonight we will be listening to the beautiful sultry voice of a rising star, the daughter of the notable Cherry D. For your consideration, please welcome Grace."

For their consideration, what does that mean, I wondered as Tony walked up to me. "No tricks," he warned me.

I walked onto the stage and unlike the usual chanting of the crowd, this one was eerily quiet. It actually made me uneasy. I started singing and I looked over the crowd to see if I could connect with someone in the room. Someone who looked sympathetic or trustworthy. But everyone wore a serious look on their face, each one wearing business suits and a chill crept over my body at the thought of what Jerry was doing.

I sang every song like I was programmed to do and after the last song as I walked off the stage, I thought perhaps they would clap. But the silence continued and when I looked back, I saw everyone getting up and they started talking amongst each other.

Jerry was waiting for me when I walked in, "you did well, Grace baby, you did better than well actually." He grinned. "Come," he said grabbing me by the arm. "There are a few people who want to meet you.

I pulled my arm out of his grip. "I am not going anywhere until you tell me what is going on here."

He laughed insincerely. "Don't give me shit, Grace, you do as you're told." I folded my arms; I knew that he needed me to go out there, so he wouldn't hurt me.

"Fine," he said through clenched teeth. "I have a few people willing to offer a lot of money to sign you to their record. We're talking more money that I will ever see in my lifetime."

He was selling me off like I was his possession, I couldn't believe my ears. "Well that is too bad, because I am not signing anything or going with anyone," I told him.

"Grace," he said leaning into me, "you forget that one phone call from me and Daddy dearest time on this earth is over."

I shuddered, I knew Jerry would not think twice about killing him and he knew that I knew it.

"So are you coming or not!" He said as he walked away.

I walked behind him down the staircase, there were a few people standing in the foyer. A tall man with short light brown hair and deep set blue eyes was the first to approach me. "You were amazing tonight," he said in a serious voice that did not match what he was saying. I didn't respond and Jerry nudged me.

"Thank you," I said.

Someone called Jerry's name and he walked away from us. I looked around, Tony also seemed to be missing and in that moment and I knew that this was my chance.

"How long have you been singing?" Mr. tall and serious asked me.

"Practically all my life," I said as my eyes darted from Jerry to the rest of the people in the room. I turned my back to Jerry and smiled insincerely at the man who was looking at me like the contract I was.

"Do you mind if I use your cellphone for a quick second, I must have forgotten mine in my room." I laughed nervously.

He looked at me sideways, "well who is it that you need to phone?" He raised a brow.

"I umm... Need to call my driver. I sent him out for a few errands and I need him to come back to get me."

As he reached for his phone, in his suit jacket, I thought of all the people I could call, my father was a long shot; he might not have cell reception. Agatha and Chris knew nothing of this and I didn't have much time to explain. The only other person was Chase. I quickly took the phone and turned my head slightly to ensure that Jerry still wasn't looking. He was still talking. I dialed Chase's number and my heart was pounding when the phone started to ring. He answered on the third ring. "Hello," I heard his whispered voice on the other side as if he had been sleeping.

Before I could say anything, I felt someone snatch the phone from my hand. I looked up and saw Jerry staring at me. "I am sorry, Peter," he told the tall man. "I'm afraid we will have to go, I will get in touch with you soon." He grabbed my arm and pulled me toward the car.

"Get in," he growled. I thought of making a run for it, but the odds were against me.

I reluctantly got into the car and Jerry climbed in opposite me. He stared at me and then started saying something but stopped himself. Then he took a breath, lifted his hand and smacked me so hard that my head whipped to the other side.

"You could have lost me a lot of money tonight," he growled. I put my hand on my cheek to ease the burn and tried not to cry.

"I am not a patient man, Grace, and if it wasn't for your dad being away at sea, I would have probably brought you a few of his fingers to motivate you. But," he sighed, "I have decided to give you a second chance and the next time you try to screw me over, he will be a dead man. I will kill every last damn person on that ship if I have to."

I shuddered at his words. I didn't know what I was thinking, putting my father in danger like that. He was never a part of this and the day I decided to help Cherry out that was my decision and I wouldn't let him pay for my mistakes.

Chapter 16

"Get out," Jerry ordered when we were back at the house.

"I need a drink," I heard him tell the driver as I climbed out and closed the door. I hugged myself as I was walking inside, it was a chilly evening and rain clouds were gathering in the sky. When I walked up to my room I was surprised that Tony was not guarding my door as usual. Jerry must have done something awful to him for not watching me closely tonight.

I opened the door to my room and when I closed it, I saw Tony lying on the floor. He was out cold. I stepped back, wide eyed and then I felt an arm on my shoulder. I spun around quickly and found myself face to face with Chase. "Chase?" I almost screamed as he pulled me into his arms. I started shaking as the tears streamed down my face.

"Shh." He stroked my hair. "Everything is okay now."

I stepped out of his arms. "How did you find me?"

"I'll tell you everything later, but for now we have to get going."

He swiftly ran toward the window and looked out. "There's too many guards in front. We'll have to go out the same way I came in, through the back."

"I'm so glad you're here, Chase," I told him, still thinking that this was all a dream.

"Me too, baby," he said as he pulled me against him and kissed me.

We heard footsteps coming up the stairs and I froze. Chase swiftly knelt down next to Tony and pulled a gun from his waist. There was a knock on my door and I stood holding my breath as Chase pointed the gun toward it.

"Would you like anything to eat, ma'am?" It was the maid's voice on the other side.

"No, I'm tired, thank you," I said, my voice shaking with nerves I hoped she didn't hear.

"Of course, ma'am," she said, and a second later, we heard her footsteps walking down the stairs.

"We have to go, Grace. Do you have everything you need?"

"Yes, I'm ready," I said, quickly slipping on my sneakers.

Chase opened the door carefully and looked around. He motioned with his hand for me to follow him, and I walked behind him. "Stay here," he ordered, and then he ran to the balcony to look down. He tucked the gun in his black jeans and gestured with his head for me to come. We walked quietly but swiftly down the stairs and Chase kept looking around every two minutes. I, on the other hand, was a ball of nerves. If Jerry caught us, Chase would be dead and I would not be able to live with myself. When we reached the back door, I noticed another guard lying at the entrance and I wondered how Chase took down these men who were twice his size. We stopped in the backyard and Chase's eyes were darting all over the place. "You ready to make a run for it?" he asked.

I nodded.

"I want you to run as fast as you can through the apple trees, down to the fence, follow this path and I will be behind you. Go now!" he said.

I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, and in that moment, I was glad for all the times Aaron forced me to run with him. We reached the end of the path and I noticed that there was a hole in the fence.

"Climb through," Chase told me.

I ducked down and went through the small hole he had made. He flung a black backpack, which he was carrying through the fence, and then he climbed through. He unzipped the bag and pulled out black sweat pants and black hooded top. "We're not going to get far with you dressed like that," Chase told me. "You have to change."

I tore off the white dress and pulled on the clothes he had given me. "My car is just on the other side of the trees. We make it there and we're halfway home." He took my hand and as we were about to go, I stopped.

"Grace, we have to go, baby," he told me.

"My mother... She is being held captive by Jerry too."

"Your mother?" he asked, confused.

"It's a long story, but she is somewhere here on this estate and I can't leave her."

"If we stray from this plan, Grace, there is a good chance we're going to get caught. We can't spend another second here."

"I know Jerry will kill her the moment he finds out that I have escaped."

"Do you know where she is?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Then lead the way," Chase said.

I ran as fast as I could, it was dark and it took me a while to figure out where I was going, but I eventually saw the cottage in the distance. As we approached it, I stopped Chase. "There is someone guarding her door at the entrance," I told him.

"I will deal with him," Chase said.

We walked around the side of the house, careful not to make any sounds and the howling wind was working in our favor. We stopped at the corner of the cottage and Chase bent down low, he quickly stuck his head around and then brought it back. He lifted up his hand to signal that I should wait where I was. He stood up and ran toward the guard and I heard something falling to the ground. When I looked, Chase was on top of the guard, giving him blows to the head, until he eventually conked out.

I ran toward him and he pulled some string out of the backpack. "Go get Cherry," he told me while he tied the guards' hands behind his back.

"Cherry," I called as I opened the door. "Grace?" she stood up from her chair, "is something the matter?"

"We have to go," I told her.

"Go where?" she asked confused.

"Someone has come to rescue me... us!"

"Are you serious?" she asked with tears in her eyes. "You're getting out."

"We both are," I told her, "let's go."

Chase was at the door. "We have to move," he said anxiously.

Cherry rushed to put on her shoes and then we saw headlights approaching and my heart skipped a beat. "We're too late," I told Chase.

The fear was evident in his eyes, there was no way out now.

Cherry ran out by the door and came back with a long black gun. It belonged to the guard. She shut the door behind her and opened the clip to check how many rounds were in the gun. "You two, climb through the back window in the bathroom, push the burglar bars off. I have been loosening them for weeks. Once you get through, swim across the river. There is a short trail that will take you to the main road. Flag down a car and head north to the closest police station."

"What about you?" I asked.

"I will hold them off honey; it will give you two a chance to get away."

"No! They will kill you," I said.

"It's the only chance you have to escape, baby. Jerry will likely kill all of us if he catches us anyway."

"I can't let you do this," I said.

Cherry stroked my face. "Baby it's the best thing you could ever let me do for you. I owe you so much more. Now go!"

I walked away with tears welling up in my eyes and as I was about to walk into the room, I stopped and looked at her and she looked at me. "Thank you, Mom," I whispered.

"I love you, baby."

"Grace, we really have to go," Chase shouted.

I ran to the window, Chase gave me a boost and lifted me up. Chase followed and we ran toward the river. Before we jumped into the cold water I heard what sounded like a hundred gunshots and tears streamed down my face because I knew that my mother was dead. Chase looked at me with sympathy in his eyes and then held out his hand.

"I'm sorry, Grace, but we have to go." I jumped in and we swam for about two minutes and when we scrambled out, we could see the road ahead. We ran toward it; my chest was on fire and as we past the last tree, a figure emerged from the darkness. It was Jerry. Chase immediately pointed his gun toward Jerry and Jerry had his gun pointed at him. Jerry stared at me and he looked murderous. Chase stepped in front of me.

"The two of you have caused me a lot of trouble," Jerry said through clenched teeth, "and someone is going to die tonight." He lifted the gun and pointed it straight at Chase's head.

I went to stand next to Chase. "I am the one you want, so why don't you get it over with," I told Jerry.

"Grace, what the hell are you doing?" Chase said without looking at me. "Get behind me now!"

"I won't allow another person to die for me. As soon as he pulls the trigger, you put a bullet straight in this bastard's head," I told Chase.

"Grace, please just get behind me," I could hear the desperation in his voice. "I don't want to lose you, baby, please do what I say."

"Oh, what a tragic love story this will be," Jerry laughed. "Such a tough decision." He pointed the gun at me and then Chase. "Eeny, meeny, miny, moe," he said as the gun landed on me. "We have our winner."

I looked at Chase, I could see his finger moving toward the trigger and then he pulled it and at the same time Jerry pulled his trigger. I felt Chase diving into me and we both fell to the ground. I could feel something warm running up my sweater and when Chase rolled off me, I saw blood gushing out from his chest.

"Chase!" I screamed, as I went to kneel next to him, "why did you do that. Help, somebody help us!" I screamed.

I looked to see where Jerry was, it looked like Chase had shot him in the shoulder because he was leaning to one side and holding it.

"Grace," he said looking up at me, "baby you have to run."

"I am not leaving you here, Chase, can you get up?"

He tried to sit up. "I don't think I can," he said. "Where is Jerry?" he asked weakly.

"You shot him, but he's not down."

"Grace, please go, I need to know that you are safe." And before I could answer Chase closed his eyes.

"Chase!" I cried as I shook him. I felt a dark shadow over me and when I looked up I saw Jerry towering over us.

"You see, Grace, this entire mess is your fault. You could have avoided all this if you just did what I asked. Now you have caused me to kill everyone that you love and I will be going for your father next. Maybe I should let you live your life alone; maybe the regret will kill you or maybe you will be begging me to kill you."

"No." He shook his head as he pointed his gun at me. "After what you did today, you deserve to die."

I closed my eyes as I held Chases head in my arms and as I took a deep breath which I thought would be my last. I heard a helicopter above me and someone shouting: "Drop your weapon!" I opened my eyes and saw that we were surrounded by about fifty armed police officers and there was a helicopter hovering above us.

"I said drop your weapon," one of the officers told Jerry again. But he didn't move.

"This is your final warning," he told Jerry. "Drop your weapon!"

"If I am going down you're going down with me, bitch," Jerry seethed and as he put his finger closer to the trigger. A few of the police officers started shooting Jerry and he fell to the ground. He lay with his eyes open for a few seconds looking at me and then he closed them.

I was shaking like a leaf when the police came running toward me. "Are you okay?" the police officer asked me.

"I need you to help him," I whimpered, "please help him."

He called someone over and two men with white uniforms came rushing over to Chase. I wasn't sure if he was still alive, because he didn't seem like he was breathing and he lost a lot of blood. They put him on a stretcher and lifted him into the ambulance and I ran after them. "I want to go with him," I told them.

The brown haired policeman was next to me again. "It's best if you stay here so that they do what needs to be done." I knew that he meant it was better for me stay behind in case Chase was dead and I dropped to my knees. He picked me up in his arms and held me.

"We need her statement," I heard someone tell the officer.

"Not now, I will take it in the morning," he said.

I moved out of his arms. "I have to go to him."

He nodded. "I will take you."

Chapter 17

When we stopped at the hospital I ran inside. The white walls, the emergency sign and the swarm of doctors and nurses all reminded me of a day I never wanted to relive. It felt like the day I lost Aaron all over again, only this time Chase's death would be my fault. I felt my head spinning and I leaned against the wall nearby and threw up in a potted plant. I could never forgive myself if Chase was dead. The officer whose name I never got put his hand on my shoulder.

"I found out which ward he is in, I can take you there," he told me

I spun around. "So, he is alive?" I said as tears welled up in my eyes.

"He is, they managed to dislodge the bullet which was dangerously close to his heart and for now he is unconscious. He lost a lot of blood and his body is very weak. Doctor says he doesn't know when he will wake up."

"Please take me to him," I said.

We walked down a wide corridor and into the ICU. "This is it," the police officer said pointing to a set of white wooden doors. There were two police officers standing on either side of the door.

"Why are they guarding the door?" I asked him.

"It's for his own protection, Jerry had a lot of people working for him," he told me.

"But Jerry is dead right?" I asked suddenly afraid.

"Yes, ma'am, he was declared dead on the scene."

I breathed a sigh of relief. He walked away from me and went to speak to the officers and they let me through. When I walked in I was hit with the same imagery as the day Aaron was lying in the hospital bed. Chase was connected to so many tubes and I nearly broke down, but Chase needed me now and I needed to be strong for his sake.

I walked toward him and held his hand. I could hardly believe that it was the same person who took down three of Jerry's goons. He looked so fragile. "Chase, I am so sorry that I did this to you, you didn't deserve this. It should have been me," I cried.

One of the nurses brought me a chair, which she said pulled out into a bed at night. I stayed awake the whole night, watching him, hoping that by some miracle he would open his eyes and call my name. But that miracle never came.

Early the next morning the officer who had brought me to the hospital walked into the room. "Any change?" he asked me.

I looked at him, really looked at him for the first time. He looked to be in his early fifties, he was a tall man with broad shoulders and curly brown hair. His green eyes looked tired and worried.

"No change," I told him.

"Grace, I am afraid that I will have to question you, the hospital has made their boardroom available for us," he told me.

I looked at Chase, I didn't want to leave him.

"It won't take long," he assured me.

I kissed Chase's forehead and followed him outside.

We walked a short distance and he opened a brown door. There was a long wooden table in the center of the room, with matching chairs all around. He motioned for me to sit down by the end of the table, closest to the door and sat opposite me. He took out a notepad and pen and took a deep breath.

"Grace, we are here today to discuss the events which led to the shooting of Chase Ryder. Could you please state your name for the record?"

"Grace Delaney," I said.

He scribbled my name down. "I don't think we've officially met," he stuck out his hand. "I am Officer O'Neil."

Officer O'Neil, I thought as I shook his hand, now where did I hear that name before? Then the realization hit me. "You are the Officer who looked out for Chase in juvi? Officer John O'Neil?"

"Yes," he pressed his mouth in a hard line. I instinctively reached out to touch his hand.

"I'm sorry, I had no idea," I said.

He wiped a tear from his eyes. "Let's continue, before I am unable to complete my questioning."

I nodded.

"Can you tell me the events that led up to the night of Chase being shot by the infamous mobster Jerry Caldara?"

I cleared my throat, wringing my hands together; I was going to let another person in on my broken childhood.

Officer O'Neil sensed my discomfort.

"Start wherever you feel comfortable and if I feel like I need more detail, I will ask," he encouraged me.

I nodded and started with the day my mother made me sing. He listened intently making notes. I would stop now and then, take a sip of water and begin again. It took longer than I thought and it drained all the energy I had and after I gave him a detailed account of how Chase saved my life, I was sobbing.

Officer O'Neil handed me a tissue. "He will wake up soon, I know it. He is stronger than you know," he told me.

"I know he will," I said trying to convince us both.

"That's all the questions I have for today, I will let you know if I need anything else."

I nodded and headed out of the door as I put my hand on the door knob, Officer O' Neil spoke again.

"Chase didn't only save your life, Grace; he brought down a notorious gangster that the police have been looking for, for years. He's a special kid," he murmured.

"Thank you," I said and walked out feeling lighter, hopeful that Chase would be okay.

I sat down next to him on the bed and held his hand. Chase was everything I knew he was, all I needed now was to tell him so, and that I was sorry for what I said to him when I last saw him. Sorry that I ever doubted him.

"Chase, you need to wake up for me, please," I said, laying my head down on his chest. A few minutes later the tiredness got a hold of me and I fell asleep.

When I woke up hours later I saw a picture of Jerry flashing on the TV and I turned it up. They spoke of his death and how many counts of murder and fraud he was wanted for.

I realized that I needed to call my Dad, Chris, and Agatha before they got wind of this from the news. It wouldn't be long before Chase's and my name would be mentioned too.

I walked outside and called Chris and Agatha first. It was the hardest to explain everything to them, since they were completely in the dark about my former life with my mother. There was a lot of loud gasping and whimpering from Agatha. Chris said almost nothing on the phone, his only words while I was telling the story was, "go on," and there was an undertone of anger in his voice. I suspected that he was angry with himself for not being there to protect me. When I ended the call, they said that they would be at the hospital within an hour.

I of course couldn't get a hold of my dad, but he was arriving in a week's time and I thought it best not to worry him, since he was so far away.

I went to take a shower in the bathroom in Chase's room and after that I decided to get myself a cup of coffee; I needed something in my stomach. While I was walking to the hospital cafeteria, I heard Agatha's voice in the foyer. She saw me at the same time that I saw her and both her and Chris sped up to meet me. Chris took me by the shoulders and looked at me with tears in his eyes before he pulled me toward him. "You gave me a big scare there, Pumpkin.

"I'm okay now," I told him.

"And how is the boy doing?" Agatha asked.

I hadn't said much about Chase. In fact, I didn't know how to bring it up.

"He is still in a critical condition."

"I just can't believe that you had a whole other life that we didn't know about, I hope you know now that keeping such things from us is a bad idea," Agatha scolded me.

"I know and I'm sorry, I just wanted to put all of that behind me."

"No one will ever hurt you again," Agatha said wrapping her arms around me.

I heard a machine beeping inside Chase's room and I ran inside. A doctor and a few nurses ran past me and I stood to the side.

"What's happening?" I asked them. But no one answered me.

All of a sudden, the heart machine started to flat line and my eyes darted from the machine to Chase to the doctor, who was working frantically on him. The doctor shouted at one of the nurses for something and she charged up a machine. The doctor put it to Chase's chest and his whole body jerked forward and then he fell back. I put my hand over my mouth to stop myself from screaming. I watched enough movies to know that if I made to much noise they would usher me out of the room. I needed to know that he was going to be okay, I couldn't leave his side.

After they shocked his heart for the third time, his pulse returned to normal and I breathed a sigh of relief. I couldn't move my feet as I looked at him, all my energy felt like it drained from my body.

The nurses left the room and the doctor was punching something into the machine that was monitoring his heart. I went to hold Chase's hand and tears streamed down my face.

"What happened?" I asked the doctor who was now writing something on a clip board.

He turned to me. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were in the room," he said. :The artery which pumps blood to the heart has been severed causing a delay in the heart getting a full supply of blood. I wanted to give it a chance to heal on its own but it has become too risky. The nurses are prepping the room for surgery so that I can fix it. It is a short, one hour surgery and uncomplicated. They will fetch him soon," he said.

I looked anxiously down at Chase.

"There is no need to be concerned," the doctor gave me a small smile before he left.

I heard someone walk in and I didn't turn around until I heard Agatha's voice. "Is that Chase Ryder?" she asked. I looked at them; both her and Chris were standing wide eyed looking down at Chase.

"Can we speak outside?" I asked.

They walked outside of the building with me following behind, trying to form the story that I was going to tell them.

"What is going on, Grace, how are you involved with Chase Ryder?" Chris asked raising his voice.

"I didn't know who he was when I met him," I explained. "We spent the whole year together and the day before Jerry captured me, I found out about Chase. I knew that he did something and was in juvi but I never connected it to Aaron."

Chris had his hands in his hair as if he wanted to pull it out.

"This is all my fault," he mumbled to himself. "Shit!"

"What is?" I asked him.

"I should have tried harder to get him behind bars, if I knew he was going to... That you were going to... I can't believe this is happening," he breathed.

"He is a good guy, Chris," I said standing in front of him. "And he saved my life."

"He saved your life and he took my son's!"

I stood back shocked. "But I read that both you and Agatha said that you knew he was innocent and that you forgave him."

"Well maybe that was the biggest mistake I have ever made. Agatha let's go," he said, and stormed off.

Agatha came to hug me as hot tears started pricking my eyes, "he just needs some time. He is angry and he doesn't know what he is saying."

"I know," I said, not really convinced because I never saw this side of Chris before. If he was this upset, he probably meant what he was saying.

"We'll talk again," Agatha said.

I walked back to the hospital in a daze. Everything was falling apart. Chris was angry with me for loving Chase, and Chase was fighting for his life because of me.
Chapter 18

I couldn't sleep that night; I was worried about Chris and Agatha, about my dad. And most of all I was worried about Chase who didn't show any signs of improvement.

The next day, Bobby, Dean, and Sebastian came to visit. Bobby burst into tears when she walked in and Dean and Sebastian went to sit next to Chase without saying a word. We all stood around him for a while and then Bobby took me to the cafeteria and forced me to eat something.

The cafeteria was fairly empty. There were a few doctors sitting on the far side of the room who looked as tired as I felt. We walked toward a lady standing behind a long white counter and Bobby ordered two coffees and a sandwich for me. We walked toward the shiny square table and sat down in very comfortable white chairs.

"I know you told me that you didn't want to talk about it on the phone, but you really scared me," Bobby said, putting her hand across the table and holding mine.

I looked at her teary eyes; it was unfair that I didn't tell her the whole story when she had been nothing but honest with me. I wasn't used to having friends who cared about me and perhaps it was time that I let people in.

I started telling her about my mother and how it led to Jerry.

"Holy shit, he actually kidnapped you?" she said, wide-eyed.

I nodded.

"Thank God Chase was there to save you, I mean it's terrible that he is in a coma right now but I am just glad that you are both alive."

"I just hope he pulls through, Bobby, if he dies because of me..." I let my head fall into my hands.

Bobby came to sit next to me and wrapped her arms around me "We have to believe that everything is going to be fine," she whispered, although I could hear her voice shaking.

When she eventually let go of me, I had two bites of the sandwich and Bobby was satisfied with that.

When we went back to the room, Sebastian was standing next to Chase's bed while Dean stood by the window.

"I can't believe he went out there on his own," Sebastian said to me. "If I was there to help him whoever did this to him... They wouldn't have stood a chance."

Sebastian and Dean didn't know the whole story, they just assumed that a couple of thugs jumped him, but I knew Bobby would fill them in. I didn't have the energy to retell the story.

I went to stand next to Sebastian and squeezed his hand. I knew that Chase would not have wanted to put anyone else in harm's way and that's why he didn't tell anyone. We sat quietly in his room; now and then Sebastian would pick up his guitar and strum a few chords for Chase.

After the sun had set and I assured Bobby that I was fine on my own, everyone said their goodbyes and left.

About an hour later I heard a knock on the door and in walked Andy with a woman about his age, she was short with a full head of white hair. She had kind eyes and with lots of wrinkles around them. Andy walked up to me and took my hands in his. "How yer holding up las?" he asked me.

"I've been better," I shrugged.

"Ai, a terrible tragedy, this is," he said looking at Chase. "This is me wife Marta, I hope yer don't mind me bringing her along."

"Not at all," I said as she walked closer to me.

"I'm sorry for what happened, Grace," she said as she surprised me with a hug.

"Thank you," I said.

They sat with me by Chase's bed for a while. Andrew never asked me what happened and I was glad that he didn't because I didn't have the strength to tell another person the story. He spoke to Chase as if he could hear him and for some reason I felt hopeful when he did that.

An hour later Andrew stood up. "We'll be heading home now, Grace, you look like yer need some rest."

Martha came to stand next to me. "Grace, would you mind if I say a little prayer for Chase."

"I don't mind at all, he needs all the prayers he can get," I told her.

She took his hand and said a silent prayer and then she kissed me on the cheek.

"We will visit yer again soon," Andrew said to me before he closed the door.

I went to sit by Chase's bed and put my hand on his cheek. "Chase, you need to wake up now. I need you to know that I am sorry for the things that I said, for the way I acted. I know it wasn't your fault. I promised you that I would never leave and I broke that promise, I'm so sorry. You have to wake up, Chase, you just have to," I sobbed.

I lay awake for hours that night until my weary body took control and I fell asleep with my head on the bed. My dreams were filled with horrid visions of Chase running away from Jerry and me trying to escape. I tossed and turned until I eventually woke up in a sweat.

"Have a bad dream?" I heard a voice beside me. I looked around the room thinking it was Aaron but there was nobody there. I felt a hand squeezing mine and I looked up at Chase.

"Chase!" I screamed.

"Hey, baby," he smiled and then coughed.

"Chase," I said again wide eyed. "Should I get a doctor, do you need anything?" I asked as my tears started flowing down my cheeks.

"Just put those sweet lips on mine so that I know that I am not dreaming," he told me.

I crashed my lips against his as my tears continued rolling down my face. He kissed my cheek. "I'm okay, baby, no need for tears."

"I'm just so happy to see your eyes open. I thought you'd never wake up. Please let me get a doctor to check you out."

"Okay, just don't take too long," he croaked.

I ran out of the room and told a nurse to call the doctor. The doctor was there within minutes. "Mr. Ryder, I am so glad to see that you are awake," he said when he walked inside.

He walked up to Chase's bed. "I am Doctor Freeh, how are you feeling?"

"Just peachy doc, I think I am ready to go home," his voice was low and hoarse.

The doctor laughed. "I am afraid you will have to stay with us a few more days."

He took a stethoscope out of his pocket and placed it on Chase's chest. "Your heart sounds stronger today, that's a good sign." He pressed on his chest directly below his heart. "How does that feel?"

"A bit tender," Chase answered.

"That's perfectly normal," the doctor told him. "when you feel strong enough I want you to get up and take a short walk outside. If you manage that then you can go home the next day."

"Thanks, doc," Chase said.

"See you tomorrow, call the nurses if you feel any discomfort," Doctor Freeh said and left.

"Come here," he called me over to him.

I went over to Chase and sat down on the chair. He shifted to the side of the bed, creasing his face because of the pain. "Get in here, I need to hold you," he said.

"Are you sure?" I asked. "I don't want to hurt you."

He patted the bed and I climbed in next to him. I looked into his eyes, with tears in my own.

"Don't cry, Grace, I am perfectly fine and I am with you."

"Chase, I am so sorry for the way I treated you when I found out about Aaron. I know that it wasn't your fault and I don't blame you. If anything happened to you before I..."

"Shh, baby, I know and you had every right to be upset. I am just glad that we are together now," he said pulling me close to him. "So what happened to that bastard Jerry?"

"The strangest thing happened when we were in the forest," I told him. "The police showed up out of nowhere and killed him. I don't even know how they knew we were there, but I suspect that Officer O'Neil had something to do with it."

"John was there?"

I nodded. "He shot Jerry before he could pull the trigger on me."

This time he had tears in his eyes. "I can't believe he actually came."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"A few days before I came to get you, I went to see John I told him that I thought something was wrong, but he was hesitant to help me because he said that there needed to be evidence that something happened. The fact that your clothes were gone and we just had a big fight didn't help my case. I wasn't convinced, something felt off so I went to campus. I still had the key you gave me and when to look around in your room. When I walked in the first thing I noticed was your handbag and I found it strange that you didn't take it with you. I opened it and saw your phone inside. When I checked the messages, I saw the ones from Jerry. I texted John giving him the location and the details and told him that I was going there. I didn't think he would show, but I should have known he would never let me down. My only regret is that I took so long to realize something was wrong."

"As long as we are both safe now," I said as I snuggled into his neck.

He kissed the top of my head. "I love you, Grace."

I looked up at him. "I love you too."

I told him about everything that happened with Agatha and Chris and how sad I was that things panned out that way.

"They'll come around, even if I have to convince them that what we have is real," he said.

We spoke into the early hours of the morning, with Chase drifting off to sleep in between conversations and then waking up again. Eventually we both drifted off to sleep.

The next morning when I woke up, Chase walked slowly out of the bathroom that was in his room. "Good morning, beautiful, I need to take that walk so that I can get out of here," he told me.

I smiled to see him up on his feet. "How are you even up? I mean are you even human?"

He laughed and then immediately put his hand over his chest where the bullet wound was, "I hate hospitals, so the sooner I get out of here the better."

"Just take it easy," I warned him.

After I took a shower, we took the elevator down to the reception area and slowly walked into the garden at the back of the hospital. It was a big, open space with a few wooden benches on the green grass. We took in the crisp air as we strolled past a row of tall, naked trees. Chase stopped at a tall palm tree and leaned against it.

"Are you tired? Do you want to rest?" I asked him.

He grinned. "No, I just want to kiss my girl."

I smiled shyly as I walked over to him, he pulled me in his arms and gently pushed me against the tree. He studied my face for a moment and then focused on my eyes before he leaned in to kiss me. We lost ourselves in that moment, we got our second chance and we were never letting go again.

He pulled away and placed his hand on my cheek. I think we should head back so that I can tell the doctor that we are ready to go home.

I suddenly realized that I hadn't told anyone that Chase was awake.

"I have to phone everyone to tell them that you are awake."

We went back and the doctor examined Chase while I went to call everyone. Sebastian and Dean wanted to come to the hospital, but I told them that we would probably go home in a few days and I invited everyone to Christmas lunch at my house. I didn't think that Chris and Agatha would be interested in being anywhere near Chase. I just needed to speak to my dad, who would be arriving that night.

I walked in as Doctor Freeh was giving Chase the go ahead to go home the next day. "Grace, just the person I was looking for. You need to make sure that he takes his medication, even if he is feeling stronger or doesn't have much pain. He needs to complete the course of medication he was given. He seems a bit stubborn," the doctor told me and we all laughed. "Also, for the next few weeks he must rest as much as possible, his recovery is dependent on it.

"I will, Doctor Freeh, thank you for everything."

He shook Chase's hand. "You will have to come for a checkup in two weeks' time but call me if you need anything before then."

"I will, doc, thank you."

I couldn't wait until tomorrow, it was going to be a fresh start for both of us and I was looking forward to a new chapter in our lives.
Chapter 19

I called my dad the next morning before we were about to leave and told him everything. He was silent a lot of the time, and usually there was a lot said in those silent moments.

"Dad, are you still there?" I asked after I told him the part about Jerry being killed.

"You should have told me, Grace, I am your father and I am supposed to protect you."

I know how deep those words ran, alluding to the time when I hid what I was doing with my mother. Back then he had said the same thing. "I am the parent here, Grace, not you! Fathers are meant to protect their daughters."

I let him down, I took that away from him again, but given the choice I would do it all over again.

"I know, Dad, and I'm sorry. But I'm okay now and we can finally close that chapter of our lives."

"We'll speak when you get home, I can't wait to meet that young man who saved your life."

"See you soon, Dad," I said and hung up.

I walked back into the room and watched as Chase pulled on the blue t-shirt that Sebastian brought when he last visited. When I told my dad who it was that saved my life, I was so terrified at what he was going to say but all he said that any guy that saved his daughters life was forever in his debt, no matter what his past was.

Chase turned around and smiled, "you ready to go?" he asked.

I nodded.

"You don't have to go with me to WRC you know. I know you wanted to spend some time with your dad."

I walked over to him and pressed my hand against his cheek. "You are going home with me, and I am not going to leave you alone there."

"Are you sure that's okay with your dad?" he asked.

"He can't wait to meet you," I said.

We left the hospital and I drove us to my house, it was just over an hour's drive and Chase slept most of the way. When we arrived and I climbed out of the car, my dad was waiting for me on the front porch. He ran toward me lifting me in his arms. "I'm so glad nothing happened to you, Grace."

"I'm fine, Dad, Jerry will never be able to hurt us again."

He nodded, my dad was a man of few words he already said what he needed to over the phone, and I knew he blamed himself for everything. The moment he found out about my mother he connected it to him having to work away and he never stopped blaming himself.

"It's not your fault, Dad, he was a bad man."

He gave me a forced smile and I knew that he had to work through it on his own. He turned to look at Chase. "This must be the man who I owe a great deal to."

Chase came to stand next to me and shook his hand. "Pleased to meet you, sir, and you really don't owe me anything. "Your daughter means everything to me," he said turning to face me. I smiled at him.

"Call me Joel, and like I told Grace you are welcome to stay here as long as you need too."

"Thank you," Chase said.

We were barely inside when we heard a knock on the door. "I'll get it," my dad said from the kitchen.

I heard Agatha's voice in the foyer. "Hi Joel, is Grace here?"

I walked out of my room, toward the front door. I stopped when I saw Chris next to her.

"Grace, can we talk?" Chris asked.

"Sure," I gave him a tense smile as I led them to the lounge. They sat down next to each other and I sat down opposite them.

Chris cleared his throat. "I believe Chase is here, I would like to speak to him too."

I was unsure about asking Chase to come inside, only because Chris looked so uneasy. But Chase appeared before I could decide whether or not I was going to call him.

He walked over to Chris and shook his hand and Chris nodded.

Chase sat down beside me and put his arm around my waist. My dad leaned against the door frame and watched us. He already knew what happened at the hospital between Chris and I, and I knew that he would give us the space to work it out.

"I wanted to come here today..." Chris started to say and then he stopped, took a breath and started again.

"I'm not going to lie. Coming here today was not easy for me, when I thought it was going to be just you, Grace, I wanted to apologize. But then your dad told me Chase was here and I wasn't so sure."

He wrung his hands together and looked down at them. Agatha moved closer and put her hand over his.

Chase and I waited for him to be ready and then he continued.

"What I said to you, Grace, I realized now that I was wrong and I am sorry that it took me so long." With tears in his eyes he turned to Chase. "My wife and I we did forgive you a long time ago, we know that it was not your fault and to throw it back in your face... I need you to know that we don't blame you and that has not changed."

"I guess I wanted to apologize to both of you. Grace has always been like a daughter to me and the fact that I wasn't there to protect her..." he stopped and Agatha squeezed his hand. "What I wanted to say," he continued, "is that even though I wasn't there to protect her, I am thankful that you were there for her."

Chase nodded and I breathed a silent sigh of relief through the tears building in my eyes.

"We have known Grace almost her whole life and the fact that she has chosen to love you says a lot about who you are. She is a beautiful person in every way and I guess I just want to ensure that she won't get hurt again," Chris told him.

"I will never do anything to hurt her," Chase assured them.

"And we believe that," Agatha said. "And I don't think we thanked you for saving her life."

"No thanks needed," Chase said. "I would give my life for hers in a heartbeat."

Chris stood up and walked toward me and I stood up to. He pulled me into his arms. "I hope you will forgive me for the harsh things I said at the hospital, Pumpkin, I was just angry with myself."

I hugged him back. "I understand, I am just happy that we are a family again."

"We will never stop being a family, Pumpkin, no matter what."

Agatha joined in the hug, wrapping her arms around both of us and we stood like that for a while.

I stepped out of Chris's hug. "Are you coming over for Christmas lunch tomorrow?" I asked him and Agatha. "You can meet all the friends I've made at WRC."

"We would love to," she said kissing my cheek.

"We will see you tomorrow then," Chris said.

I stood in the doorway and waved to them as they drove off.

"I'm glad it all worked out," I heard Chase behind me.

"Me too," I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me.

"So, what do you want to do for the rest of the day?" he asked.

"You are getting into bed," I ordered. "I put your pills on the nightstand next to your bed, you need to rest!"

"Sheesh, you are worse than Doctor Freeh," he grinned.

"Just get your handsome behind to bed!"

"Yes, ma'am, he saluted and gave me a swift kiss before leaving.

I sat down on my bed and thought about what just happened. I knew that it would take Agatha and Chris a while to come to terms with what was happening. The fact that I was in love with the man who was involved in the car crash that killed Aaron was not going to be easy for them to understand, but at least they were trying.

"I heard a soft knock on my door and then my dad walked in.

"You doing alright, honey?"

"Everything is perfect, Dad, I feel like everything is finally falling into place."

He nodded, "I'm glad to hear that you are happy."

"I am," I told him. I was surrounded by everyone that I cared about and I couldn't ask for anything more. "Which reminds me," I said jumping up, I need to get a few things from the store for tomorrow's lunch."

"Do you need me to prepare anything while you're gone?"

"Since when have you become a chef?" I asked quizzically. Unless they have been giving you lessons on the ship?"

He laughed. "Okay you got me there, was just trying to be helpful."

I swooped past him and planted a kiss on his cheek, "just leave everything to me."

I bought so much food at the store, I wasn't sure if I would be able to make everything. I even stopped to buy a Christmas tree and helped a guy lug it onto the roof of my car.

When I got home my dad took the tree into the house and Chase chipped in with making the food.

Chase got tired quickly and I chased him to bed again. After midnight, I finally jumped into a shower and into bed. I sighed as I looked out of the window, all the broken parts of my life were finally coming together. I hadn't felt this happy in a long time.

There was just one thing missing. Aaron was still not here and I still missed him and I was still not sure that I wanted to let go of seeing him in ghost form. I didn't think that I knew how, even if I wanted to.

***

The next morning, I was up early and Chase came in to help me. "Good morning, beautiful," he said as he spun me around and kissed me on my lips.

"Good morning," I smiled. "Why are you out of bed so early?"

"Why are you?" he lifted his brow.

"I just needed to put the turkey in the oven, so please go back to bed."

"I will if you come with me," he grinned.

"Fine," I laughed closing the oven and we tiptoed to the guest bedroom while giggling.

I snuggled up in his arms and listened to him breathing as he held on tightly to me. Eventually his breathing evened out and he fell asleep. He was still being patient with me and I wondered how this could be the same man of a year ago. I closed my eyes and drifted away, as his breathing lulled me to sleep.

A few hours later I stood up and left Chase to sleep. I set up the wooden table in the dining area and hoped that everyone would be able to squeeze in around it. I took all of the Christmas decorations from the attic, which was in a big brown box, and hauled it up the stairs. It wasn't in as bad a condition as what I thought and I dusted it off and put it near the window.

While I was draping the lights around the tree, Chase walked into the room and came up behind me wrapping his arms around me. I turned around and kissed his cheek and he in turn nuzzled my neck, causing me to giggle.

"Do I really get to wake up to the sight of this every day?" he sighed.

"You do, if you stay in bed and relax," I warned him.

"I'm fine," he said walking toward the tree. "Let me help you with this."

I pushed the box over to him and we continued decorating. I shoved my hand down the box, when I felt something round and shiny and pulled out a green ball with my mother's name on it and stopped to look at it. Tears sprung to my eyes at the last memory of her.

"You okay?" Chase asked when he turned around and saw what I was holding.

I nodded.

"Do you miss her?" he asked as he came and sat down beside me on the rug.

I turned the ball in my hand and stared at my skewed reflection in it. "I miss the idea of what she was. The way she was in the end... I needed that from her my whole life and when she tried to change, she died."

Chase pulled me against him and I rested my head on his chest.

"I know that she was a bad person..." I said. "For as long as I can remember, she was a bad person and all that I could think of was how much I hated her. But her dying for me... It's like it out rules all of that, everything she ever did to me. Like, it's the only thing that my heart will allow me to remember from now on."

"And you deserve to hold on to that memory, she was there for you when you needed her most and in the end, it's what counted," Chase said.

"I know," I said, as the tears spilled over. I quickly wiped them away. "I should finish the food, everyone will be arriving soon."

"What do you need me to do?" Chase asked as he stood up and pulled me with him and straight into his arms.

"Just get your handsome butt ready," I said against his mouth.

"I am one lucky guy," he said kissing me.

"Looks like I am not needed here," we heard my dad saying and then the front door opening. "Just going out to get a few last-minute gifts," my dad shouted from the doorway and Chase and I both laughed.

Chase went to take a shower while I put the roast in the oven and went to get ready. I put on a red flowing dress, with a pair of tan sandals. I let my hair hang loose in waves and put on a shade of light brown lipstick. I walked out of my room and into the dining room area where Chase was standing by the widow and sipping some coffee. He whistled loudly when he saw me and I laughed as I twirled for him.

"You don't look too bad yourself," I said when I surveyed him. He wore blue shorts with a white shirt which hugged his muscles and a pair of light blue sailor shoes. He hadn't cut his hair in a while and it was almost hanging over his eyes and I decided that I liked it like that.

We heard a car door open and shut and I peeked through the window. "It's Dean and Bobby," I told Chase.

"I'll open for them," he said.

Dean and Chase walked into the dining room laughing, with their arms draped over each other. Bobby ran past them toward me in a tiny blue dress and her hair was a perfect mess of curls. "I missed you, chica, and you look amazing," she said hugging me.

"Thanks, Bob, I missed you too."

'We have a lot of catching up to do," she said turning her head sideways to Chase. "I missed the part where you told me that you and Chase were shacking up together."

I nudged her, "it's not like that."

"Night nurse?" she teased.

"Just go sit down," I said laughing and shaking my head.

Sebastian arrived shortly after them and when he saw Chase, I was certain that he was about to burst into tears. Chase walked up to him and put his arm over his shoulder. "I'm okay, bro," Chase told him.

He nodded and there was no further interaction about it, they walked over to us at the table.

"Hi, Grace," Sebastian said hugging me.

"Hey, please sit down," I said.

My Dad came back with a mountain of presents and Agatha and Chris walked in behind him. After I introduced everyone, I brought out the food and for a moment I stood and watched everyone, talking and laughing. I went from thinking I lost everything, to having this.

There were so many conversations happening around the table, I couldn't keep track. "This food is amazing, Grace," Agatha told me and everyone agreed.

I smiled shyly. "Thanks but I didn't do it alone, Chase helped."

Chase shook his head; all I did was skin a few potatoes. This was all Grace," he said leaning over to kiss me on the cheek.

I blushed, looking down at my plate.

After Chase and Sebastian cleared the table, I brought out the chocolate mousse pudding I made for dessert. When it started getting dark, I switched on the tree lights and we all went to sit on the sofas around the tree, to open gifts.

Dad went first, he picked up a tiny box wrapped in silver wrapping paper and handed it to me. I opened it and found an airline ticket inside.

"What's this?" I asked waving it in my hand.

He gave me a crooked smile. "I just missed you this past year and in the new year we're going to be away for longer periods. We will be docking in most places for two, sometimes even three weeks. I thought if you wanted to fly over when you wanted to see me, I would love that. Bring Chase along if he wants," he said looking at Chase. Chase smiled and nodded at my dad.

"I would love to, Dad, thank you," I said walking over to him and hugging him.

I went to fetch his, which was wrapped in red wrapping paper with green miniature trees on it. When he opened it, his eyes lit up, it was a CD player with a collection of all his favorite CD's, the one's we used to listen to together when I was growing up.

"So you can have something to listen to when you away and have a part of home with you," I said timidly.

"I love it, honey, thank you."

"Grace, Chris and I didn't bring your present with you tonight," Agatha told me. "I left it at home because I was hoping you would come around tomorrow to fetch it."

"Sure," I said and in that case, I will bring yours and Chris's present around tomorrow too." I was secretly glad that we didn't exchange gifts tonight with them, because I got them something that would remind them of Aaron.

"That's perfect, Pumpkin," Chris said. "And if you don't mind, we are going to head home. I am afraid I've had one too many glasses of that delicious punch that Sebastian made."

The room erupted in laughter. "Grace," my dad said. "I will be staying over at Chris and Agatha's so that there is enough room for your friends."

"Thanks, Mr. D," Bobby said. "But you really didn't have to, we could have booked into a hotel or something."

"Don't even think on it," my dad said, "you're all family now."

I walked them to the door and when I kissed my dad goodbye, he whispered. "I like Chase, he is a good guy and I am glad that you found someone to love. I mean I know you loved Aaron and that you are in no way replacing him but I am glad that you found someone special to fill a different place in your heart."

I hugged him with tears in my eyes, he had no idea how much his words meant to me. "Thanks, Dad," I said. He nodded and walked to the car. I watched him drive off as I dried my tears and then I felt an arm around me. I looked up at Chase and he kissed the top of my head.

"Everything okay?" he asked.

"Everything is perfect," I told him.

"Grace!" Bobby shouted from inside, "there are still more gifts to open you know."

I laughed as I walked inside and Bobby handed me mine. When I opened it, there was a pair of silver diamond earrings, which I assumed were very expensive. "Bobby this is beautiful, you shouldn't have."

She waved her hand. "I never see you wearing jewelry and the store I bought it from has a no return policy, so don't think about telling me to take it back."

I shook my head. "It's gorgeous, thank you."

Bobby excitedly gave everyone else their gifts and then we all gave each other the rest of the gifts, until it was only Chase and I left.

I went to fetch his present. It was a large gift so I had to use all the gold wrapping paper I had to wrap it. From the shape of it, everyone probably knew that it was a painting.

"I think I have an idea what this is," Chase said with a smile. He opened it and his eyes were immediately filled with tears when he saw what I painted. He was quiet for a long time and then Dean broke the silence.

"What is it?" Dean asked.

"It's... a painting. A replica, from a photo from the first time my grandfather and I played a song together."

In the painting, they were sitting on a wooden bench both holding guitars and I tried to replicate it exactly the same, down to the acorn on the floor that had fallen off of the trees behind them.

"Grace, this is... Where did you find this picture?"

"I asked officer O' Neil if he had anything and he said that he had this one which you left behind the day you left," I said handing him the photograph. "He said that he wanted to give it to you when you came around to visit."

"I love it," he said as he came to me and lifted me an inch from the ground, planting a kiss on my lips. "You are amazing, Grace Delaney," he whispered to me.

"Now for yours," he said.

"I'll get it," Sebastian said as he ran outside.

I frowned at Chase, confused. "Where is he going?"

"You'll see." Chase grinned.

Sebastian came back empty handed and whispered something in Chase's ear.

Chase stood up and walked around the corner, he came back with a long box which was covered in red and green wrapping. I opened it and found that it was a long brown box on the inside, I opened the box and my eyes went wide when I saw what the box was holding. A Stromberg Master, which looked almost exactly like Chase's, in fact I thought it was his.

"You're giving me your guitar?" I asked.

"It's not mine, I got this one for you."

"But how? This must have cost you an arm and a leg."

"I know a few people," he told me.

"This is beyond too much, Chase."

"Don't feel bad, Grace, I think Chase bought that so that he could spend more time with it than you," Sebastian joked.

"Or maybe he wants to pass down his guitar skills," Dean said.

Chase started to laugh and I gave him a stern look not to say anything about me playing but he totally ignored me.

"Trust me guys, she plays better than anyone we have ever heard."

Sebastian's mouth literally fell open. "You play?"

I didn't answer him, but I am sure my red face gave me away.

"Did you know?" he turned his attention to Bobby.

I watched her shake her head slowly, eyes wide.

"I should have tried harder to win you over from Chase," he teased. Chase shot him a deadly stare. He threw his hand up in the air, "just kidding. But on a serious note we should go to the bar down the road, so that Grace can show us just how amazing she is."

"I don't think so," I said as my body went cold at the thought.

"Okay, fine," Sebastian said, "But can we at least go get a drink there, I kind of told a blonde beauty that bleeding hearts would make an appearance." Everyone laughed as he made a puppy face to plead his case further.

"It's Grace's party, so it's up to her," Chase said.

He stuck his lip out for dramatic effect and I burst out laughing. "Sure, it's fine."

We all put on our coats and decided to take a walk to the bar, which was ten minutes away. Although it was a chilly night, the air was clear and smelled like fresh rain. When we arrived at the bar, I realized that I had never been there before, even though it was so close to my house. It was right next to the pier and had a wooden beach style to it. It had wooden tables, with a wooden bar and was very colorful. Blonde Beauty ran to us as soon as we walked into the door and I could see why Sebastian would like someone like her. She was tall and thin and everything about her was perfect.

"I can't believe you actually came," she told Sebastian, shuffling her feet excitedly. He subsequently disappeared with her and Chase put his arm around my waist as we walked to the bar. Bobby and I hoisted ourselves onto the gray bar chairs and Chase and Dean stood behind us. Bobby ordered us a round of drinks and a Coke for Chase which she found amusing.

A few drinks later and my head was spinning and Sebastian came walking back to us with a grin on his face. "Guys, I kinda need a favor," he addressed Chase and Dean.

"Why does this sound like something we are not going to want to do?" Chase asked.

But before he could answer, Blondie was on stage squealing like a five-year-old.

"Hellooo everyone! We have some local celebrities with us tonight and they have agreed to do a song for us, maybe two if we can convince them."  
Chase gave Sebastian a look and he shrugged his shoulders innocently.

Blondie continued, "Please help me welcome on stage..." She dragged out the band's name, "The Bleediiiiing Hearts!"

Everyone cheered loudly and Bobby turned to me shaking her head. "It's unbelievable that everywhere we go, some floozy knows Dean because of the band."

"That's what you get for dating a rock star," I nudged her and she rolled her eyes.

They walked onto the stage and Sebastian spoke into the microphone, "Thank you all, I hope you enjoy the next song, which I would like to dedicate to one of our biggest fans', the lovely Aubrey."

I assumed that was what Blondie's name was because she screamed uncontrollably. Sebastian was charming the pants right off of her.

They sang one of their hits, _A Road Which Leads Me to You_ , and Bobby and I sang along. When it was done, the crowd shouted for more. Sebastian was at the microphone again. "In keeping up with tradition, we usually ask a lady to sing a song with our handsome lead singer, Chase Ryder. Aubrey? Would you bring Chase the names please?" he asked.

Aubrey ran over with the names in a cowboy hat and lifted it above Chase's head. He drew a name from the hat, looked at the piece of paper, stuck it into his jeans pocket and grinned. "Tonight, I have the pleasure of singing with a very talented lady," Chase said. "Please help me welcome Miss Grace Delaney on stage."

My heart stopped beating in my chest. I looked over to Sebastian who had a mischievous look on his face and I silently vowed to smack him later.

Chase was smiling even broader at me and I shook my head slowly.

"It looks like we're going to have some trouble getting her up here," Chase said. "Would everyone please help me?"

Everyone started to chant my name but I refused to move and Bobby was stifling a giggle. "Just go," she said.

Chase turned and said something to Dean and he started playing. I recognized the song immediately. It was the duet song, _We Both Know._ I felt bad leaving him up there alone without the female vocal, which the song required, I dragged my feet up the stage and to my horror, when I came close to Chase he stuck a guitar in my hand and Dean stopped playing. Chase started the song again and looked at me to join him and when I did, he stopped playing too. He sang and I joined him and the room went still. I looked at him and he looked at me, and in that moment, there was only the two of us in the room. Everything we went through this year, everything I overcame, was because of him and I knew I would love him for the rest of my life.

When the song ended, the room erupted and I quickly walked back to Bobby. Chase, Dean and Sebastian followed. "Grace," Bobby breathed. "Are you serious with that voice?" I blushed and downed the blue liquid in front of me.

Sebastian had his hand over his heart. "Grace you are amazing." And Dean shook his head in agreement. "That was totally bad ass, Grace," Dean said.

"If you're interested," Sebastian said, "I'll kick Chase off as lead singer and you can join The Bleeding Hearts."

"Hey," Chase pretended to be wounded.

"I'd rather not." I laughed.

Chase came to me and put his mouth against my ear and my breath hitched, "I love you," he said and I knew he felt what I did.

Not too long after that Sebastian disappeared and we dragged a drunken Bobby home. I couldn't wait to get her into bed; she was staggering around in the street, shouting how amazing I was.

I put her into my bed and was about to tell her that I wasn't going to sleep next to her if she didn't shut up. But when I got back from the bathroom, she was sound asleep.

I heard a light knock on the door as I was about to climb into the bed. I opened it and found Chase leaning against the door frame. "I just wanted to say goodnight," he said pulling me against his muscular chest and kissing me, "and to tell you that you were amazing tonight. Thank you for letting go and allowing everyone to see just how amazing you are."

He let go of me and handed me the piece of paper which looked like the one he drew out of the hat. "Goodnight," he said, smiling, and walked off to bed.

"Good night," I whispered.

I went into my room, closed the door and went to lay in my bed. I wondered why he would give me the paper that he drew, which I assumed had my name on it but when I opened it, there was nothing written inside.

Chapter 20

I was woken up the next morning to Bobby planting a kiss on my head. I opened my eyes and looked up at her, she was fully dressed. "Where are you off to so early?"

"Dean and I are going to leave," she whispered. "We're going to spend some time with his parents."

"Oh, really?" I said sitting up. "First time I hear about it."

"I know," she said, "I'm just feeling a bit nervous, it's a pretty serious step for me."

I laughed, "You're just meeting his parents not marrying him."

"Do not even mention the 'M' word," she warned, "I am nervous as it is and knowing Dean, I would not be surprised."

I laughed again. "You'll be fine, stop stressing and enjoy yourself. You love Dean and he loves you."

"I know," she said.

There was a knock on the door. "Bobby, you ready?" Dean asked.

I got up and put on my robe. "Let me see you two out."

When we walked outside I saw that Chase was also up, and helping Dean carry their bags to the car.

"Goodbye," I said, hugging Bobby. Dean waved as he climbed into the car.

Chase closed the trunk and walked toward me, scooping me up in his arms. "Good morning, beautiful."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. "Good morning, baby," I said back and he grinned.

"So, what are we going to do today?" he asked.

"I thought I would go around to Agatha since she asked me to come yesterday. You can stay here if you like."

A look of uncertainty flitted across his face and then he said, "I think I'll come with you."

When we drove to their house, there was an uneasy silence in the car. Chase was going to see the house where I lived for a part of my life, with a boy I was in love with, and a boy that died in a car crash he was involved in.

When we got there, Chase decided to stay in the car and I told him it was okay.

I walked up to the house and was greeted by Agatha. "Hi, Grace, please come inside."

"Good morning," I smiled as I handed her gift to her. "Is Chris here? I want to give him his gift."

"He's in the kitchen."

I walked into the kitchen and Chris was washing the dishes. "Good morning, Pumpkin." He smiled.

"Hi, Chris, brought your gift," I said.

"Thank you, Pumpkin," he said drying his hands and giving me a hug.

"And here is yours," Agatha said behind me.

I turned around and she handed me a tiny box, with gray wrapping.

"Before you open that, please come with me," she said.

I walked with her up to Aaron's room and she opened the door.

When she opened it, I stood back, shocked. His room was cleared out. Only his bed stood next to the window, with white sheets on it. His model airplanes he spent years building were gone. Mr. Green, the skeleton next to his cupboard, was gone, and all the weird anatomy posters on his gray walls were gone too.

I looked at Agatha.

"It was time," she forced a smile.

She took a brown shoe box out of the white cupboard and handed it to me. "It had your name on it, so I didn't open it. I'll leave you to it," she said.

I went to sit down on his bed and looked at the box; it had my name written on it in cursive, in Aaron's hand writing.

My hands started to shake as I opened it.

There were pictures in it, pictures of me. Sitting alone mostly, by the pier, at the beach, the different places that we went to and I never knew that he had taken pictures of me.

At the bottom of the box, I found a white envelope. I opened it up and found a letter inside.

Dear Gracy,

I'm not sure how to tell you this and I don't think that I ever will but maybe one day this letter will find its way to you.

You may find this strange since I have always been like a big brother to you, or maybe that is how you saw me. But believe me I never saw you like a little sister. The day I saw you sitting on that swing alone in the park it was not as you assumed, because I thought you were broken, but because I thought you were the most beautiful girl I had ever laid my eyes on. In the five years of knowing you, that has never changed, in fact you look more and more beautiful every day.

I put my hand over my mouth and my eyes started to sting with tears.

I might be a coward for writing you a letter and not telling you in person and I might be a coward because you will never know this, but that's only because I don't want to ruin our friendship. And if I never get to tell you how I feel that's okay because you will always be my best friend and having you in my life forever, watching you go through life as an artist, a wife and a mother is enough for me.

I love you Grace and no matter what we become, I always will.

Aaron

The tears escaped and I sobbed uncontrollably, so much so that Agatha came walking into the room.

"Grace?" was all she said.

I handed her the letter and when she was done she started to sob too, but she had a smile on her face.

"I always knew that he was in love with you," she said.

"Then why didn't he tell me, it could have been so different?" I cried.

"It was all that it was meant to be and you made him so happy, Grace, no matter what you were."

"But I loved him the same way," I said, "and he never knew."

Agatha rubbed her hand over my hair. "Grace, the love you had for each other was enough for him, for both of you and maybe that's why he held on to this letter because what you had with each other was already perfect. Yes, he was taken too early, but he lived his life to the fullest and he did it with the love of his life and his best friend by his side. Always remember that."

"Thank you for giving me this, Agatha," I said standing up, "but I think I need to be alone."

I practically ran out of the house and forgot that Chase was waiting in the car for me. I took a few breaths and tried to pull myself together as I walked toward him.

He immediately saw that something was wrong when I climbed in the car but he didn't say anything, just squeezed my hand.

"Can we go to the graveyard on Pictor Street?" I croaked.

"Sure," he said and started up the car.

The drive over to the graveyard was quick and silent.

"I'll wait here," Chase said as he pulled up to the gravel road.

I climbed out and walked to a gray and white headstone which had Aaron's name on it and a picture of him.

I looked at the grave when I felt someone standing next to me and from the corner of my eye I could tell it was Aaron, but I didn't turn around.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked as tears streamed down my face.

"I didn't have to, Grace. It wouldn't have changed anything really, except the physical aspect of our relationship."

"But still, you could have told me and now I have to find out when you're gone."

"We were happy, Grace, happier than most people who are in a relationship. You needed to see that letter to let go, to know that I loved you the same way you loved me and that is all that matters."

I turned to look at him. "So you're saying goodbye to me now?"

He smiled at me. "You are ready for me to, and I will always be with you. Maybe not the way you see me now, but nobody can take away the times we spent together and you can always hold onto that. Remember me that way, happy and at peace. You have a great life ahead of you. Grace, the one I have always wanted for you. I love you."

"I love you too," I said through my sobs and he disappeared with a smile on his face.

I turned back to his grave and looked at it for a long time until I felt an arm around me.

"You okay?" Chase asked.

"I think so," I said as I rested my head onto his shoulder.

He kissed the top of my head.

"Do you think Aaron would have approved of me?" he asked.

"He would have loved you, just like I do, and even more so because you saved my life."

"No," Chase said as he turned me to face him. "You have it all wrong, Grace, you are the one who saved me."

The End.

