 
The Tie That Binds

by

Vincenzo Morino

" _For those who made mistakes."_

SMASHWORDS EDITION

* * * * *

PUBLISHED BY:

Vicenzo Morino on Smashwords

The Tie That Binds

Copyrighted 2005 by Daniel Graves

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Author's Note

This is a story of redemption from mistakes made long ago. From his youth on the beaches of Southern California to adulthood on the ski slopes of the Rocky Mountains, Sam Morino found it very hard to move on from a bad decision made in his youth. Two extraordinary women came to his aid and helped heal the scar. Both were in love with the same man, one long ago in his youth, and the other now. Tina Miller was the love of his youth, who helped when least expected. Lynda Gregory was the love of his present day. He just didn't know it. When the paths of these individuals met, miracles began to happen.

The story is completely fiction. I've lived with it for years, and thought it was time to share it with others. Names and places were borrowed from life experiences to paint the story. Gio was based on one special person who I've known and had a unique knack of connecting with people...a real charmer.

Lost love from youth was a convenient theme to tell the real story, which was forgiveness for mistakes of the past that often plague people throughout their lives. In the end no matter how big the mistake, if God can forgive us...we should forgive ourselves.

For

Vincenzo, Maria, and Francesca.

*****

### The Tie That Binds

*****

### Chapter 1

### Fall of 1994

She walked out of his life almost 20 years ago ...and he never really stopped loving her. After the breakup, he stole every opportunity he could to see Tina even though it was pure agony. He couldn't decide what was more uncomfortable...being close enough to have to carry on an awkward conversation, or seeing her from across a room. He forced himself to joke and laugh around her.

He may have fooled others, but not himself. The empty nights at home were filled with far too much spare time. The time away at school was brutal, especially when he knew some of the guys at work were flirting with her. Strange how quickly that started after they stopped dating. Some of them were pretty good friends of his, too.

He saw her sparingly over the years. She had moved away shortly after the breakup and returned a few years after he graduated from college. Whenever he did see her, it just brought back the aching in his heart that he thought he had gotten rid of long ago. There were times when he thought up plans to get her back. He'd mention these to friends who had heard it all before. He must have sounded pitiful sometimes, but they never showed it. After all, it was never easy getting over the love of your life.

It was over two years before he could even date without comparing every girl to Tina. She was like a ghost passing in and out of his daily existence. Young love somehow stays fresh in the mind. Unfortunately for Sam Morino, the memory of Tina was always too clear.

* * *

Sam was standing on the deck outside of his kitchen door sipping coffee. The sun was still low in the eastern sky casting a pink and orange hue over the distant mountains to the northwest. He always loved drinking coffee outside in the early morning. It wouldn't be long before it was too cold to do so because winter wasn't that far off. September was more than half over.

In the Colorado high country fall was spectacular. The aspens around the house started turning yellow and it wouldn't be long before the hillsides were awash in their golden splendor. As he looked at the distant peaks, he could see the hint of yellow here and there, but the red of scrub oak was more prevalent. He remembered Vermont's autumn foliage with all of the brilliant reds and oranges, but somehow Sam thought that fall in the Rockies was just a little grander. Many would argue with good reason, but anyone who knew him well knew that Colorado was a special place for him. It had been that way since the first time he passed through on his motorcycle in 1977. It would take him a few more years to finally move there.

He had done pretty well for himself considering the rocky start. Years ago when he announced that he was leaving his job in the oil business, family and friends thought that he had gone a little nuts. Out of college he lucked into a pretty good job. He worked as a financial analyst with one of the largest independent oil companies in the U.S., which was headquartered in southern California. It was somewhat of a fluke how he got the job. While he was bartending through his senior year of college one of his customers was a crude oil trader with the oil company. Upon graduation, he helped Sam with an opportunity to interview for an opening. He must have said something right because it was only six weeks later and he was moving into his first office...a cubicle on the 12th floor of a skyscraper in Century City. His first promotion came just 3 months later after he recovered over $600,000 in an overlooked shipping claim for demurrage. His next office had a window overlooking the Los Angeles Country Club. Almost a year to the day from when he started, he changed companies and went to work for ARCO. His commute was a lot shorter to the Long Beach harbor area from his apartment in Belmont Shore. He found working in the shipping business interesting, but something inside that he couldn't identify made him restless.

When his mom and dad asked why he was leaving southern California just three years out of school, Sam explained that the crowds had just closed in a little too much, that it no longer felt like home. Deep inside, he was looking for a new start.

He said that he was going to head to the Rockies...probably Utah or Colorado and see if he could find what he was longing for out there. That was immediately followed by a frown from both of them. While he couldn't remember their exact comment, he did remember their general displeasure. But he had always landed on his feet, so they wished him well reminding him he always had a room waiting for him if it didn't work out. Both of them figured he'd be back in six months. Four years later they decided it was time to turn his old bedroom into an office.

Sam ended up in Breckenridge, Colorado. There, he spent his first winter working at the Breckenridge Ski Area as a lift operator during the day and a bartender at night in one of the many nightclubs. Squeaking out a meager existence, halfway through the winter, he started wondering what the hell he had done. At 9,600 feet above sea level, winter was long and cold. This was compounded by so working many hours that he had little time to ski, which was supposed to be one of the perks for working at the ski area to begin with. He shared an old, run down condo with three other guys. There, he went to bed with layers of clothes on because many, old paint jobs left the window permanently unable to be sealed.

Summer finally came and, even though it was short, Sam was captivated. It was more than the cobalt blue skies. The high, jagged ridges and towering peaks always amazed him. It was a far cry from the long summers along the beach, but it was gazing over the long distances of valleys and ridges of wilderness that brought him the peace of mind he had been missing since Tina left him.

A lot had happened in the 17 years since he and Tina broke up. The thought of crossing paths with her in Durango never entered his mind, but she would come looking for him. Oddly enough, he had finally gotten over her and was seeing someone else.

* * *

A chilled breeze blew through the nearby aspens and it sent a shiver up his spine. He sipped his coffee for some warmth. Looking out over the edge of his cup he smiled into the distance of the far off peaks to the northwest, the La Platas.

Walking to the edge of the deck, he leaned over with both forearms on the rail and peered out over the canyon below. He loved this view from the back of his home. The La Plata Mountains rose in the distance off to the left, topping out at a little over 10,000 feet. They were densely covered with forests of aspen and pine before thinning out to the grasses and barren peaks. These gave way to canyons and flat buttes as your eye worked its way east towards Durango. Beyond Durango to the north and east was the San Juan Range. These were jagged mountains...with peaks called the Needles, Engineer, and Red Mountain. The combination of reddish clay soil and the green forests was a dramatic foreground against the Colorado sky. Sam peered towards Engineer Mountain and worked his way back to town trying to locate Paradise Valley Ski Resort.

Gazing over the scenery he never tired of, he thought of Tina again. All those years and her memory kept locked away; it was easy for him to remember when he first met her. He smiled at how easy it was.

### Chapter 2

### Looking Back

Life was good at eighteen along the beach communities of southern California in 1973. Suburban sprawl was occurring inland, but it hadn't totally strangled the beach cities yet. You could still get on a freeway during the day or night and actually do at least the speed limit. Sam lived with his parents in what was known as Belmont Heights, which was the coastal neighborhood of Long Beach. Palm trees were dominant along the neatly groomed yards. Curiously, the palm trees became home over the years to green parrots that had escaped as pets and proliferated. The architecture of the houses was a mix of small Spanish hacienda, Mediterranean, and beach Craftsman. It was a safe, comfortable existence.

Most of the homeowners living here had bought into the neighborhood during and right after WWII. It was logical for many of them. They were ex-navy personnel and many called the naval base at nearby Terminal Island home during the war. The GI loans made home purchases "affordable" and so they stayed close to their roots.

Sam's grandfather, Giovanni, left Varazze, Italy in 1918 trying to escape the aftermath of WWI. He settled in Los Angeles in the mid '20s because southern California reminded him of his Italian homeland in many ways. He opened a very successful Italian "ristorante" near downtown in 1924 that was known for its singing waiters. A fan of the great Caruso, Gio also had an operatic voice, which he felt compelled to share with his guests at least once nightly. Even during the depression, the "Café Varazze" did well enough to help Gio afford to buy 6 lots in Belmont Heights. He always loved the beach and used to drive down to Palos Verde from L.A. to watch the ships come and go. He spent similar time in his youth watching the ships come and go in Genoa. Upon his son's return from the Pacific theatre after the war, Gio gave Ben and his beautiful, young wife one of the lots for his bravery in defending their country.

With the help of his father and friends, Ben built a small, three-bedroom Mediterranean style home next door to his parents. It was his pride and joy in 1946 and remained that way throughout his life.

It was along the beach not far from the naval base that Sam's father met his mom. She was there along with a couple of her sisters escaping the summer heat of 1941 from their downtown Los Angeles home. Ben was on leave; scheduled to depart in 2 weeks for Pearl Harbor. Before the ship left, he had married Sam's mom, Maryann, in Las Vegas. The next time they saw each other it was 10 months later.

Ben retired from the navy in 1959 as an enlisted officer at the age of 39. He took a job as a harbor pilot for the port of Los Angeles/Long Beach. It was a natural progression from being the port captain in the Navy on the island of Samoa. Maryann raised the kids. Sam was not only the youngest of three, but also the only boy. This provided some extra privileges, but also worked against him in many ways. At least, he thought it did. Sam often thought his "freedom" was greatly inhibited, as it was natural for most teenage boys.

Sam had coasted through high school mostly due to his early education at St. Bartholomew's elementary school. By the time he entered the 9th grade, homework and study habits had been forged into his routine. This was partially due to his mom taking such a great interest in the kids' education. She spent many a night tutoring Sam over the kitchen table until bedtime. The other being the discipline of the Sisters of St. Louis he had for his teachers. In many ways they were strong, and foreboding. In other ways, they could be loving and caring.

As Sam looked back on those earlier years, it was common for him to smile about one young sister in particular. Sister Rafael had occasion to get so caught up in the antics of a few kids that before she knew it she was turning red and snickering along with the rest of the students.

Sam's existence in high school wasn't as easy. Initially, the public school system was a shock in many ways. Students smoking in the restrooms or on the way to school wasn't nearly as strange to deal with, as was the open discussion about drugs and pot. His freshman year was 1969. Hippies were prevalent, along with bell-bottoms, tie-died shirts, love beads, roach clips, and VW Vans. There were rumors that the Beatles were breaking up, Jim Morrison would overdose, and Vietnam was raging. All this was quite a shock to a kid that had worn a starched white shirt and salt n' pepper corduroy pants for the previous eight years.

Slowly, Sam got a little more comfortable with public school. It took him a while to dress "right". When he finally assembled just the right outfits he wore them over and over to try to fit in. It worked to a degree, but eventually Sam gave up and stuck with a close circle of friends.

His hair got longer as a sophomore. The war dragged on. His parents hated the long hair, but basically Sam was a good kid. He still willingly attended mass with them on Sundays. So, they tolerated it. At least his hair was clean. They really had no choice because all of his friends had hair down to their shoulders by the time they reached their senior year. By then, the two most important things in Sam and his friends' lives were surfing and girls. Early mornings before school found Sam and his friends at the beach. They'd get up at the crack of dawn and hit the waves at nearby Seal Beach. Not all of their parents were happy about this dedication. Some tried to dissuade them otherwise. Sam's parents were among them, but they didn't succeed. In the end, they realized that surfing was far healthier and innocent than other alternatives...and what the heck he was still getting A's.

Two to three days a week Sam was working at a local shoe store. He had started in his junior year. He was making 25 cents above minimum wage...a whole $2.10 per hour. Half way through his senior year his mom and dad agreed to help him buy a buy a car. Sam would pay for gas and have to learn how to work on the car in the event of any breakdowns.

After some searching, Sam found exactly what he had been looking for...the perfect "surfer" van. It had big, wide tires in the back and smaller ones in the front. As a result, it was slightly raised up in the back. It had black "tuck-n-roll" bucket seats. The body was straight and the engine ran pretty good. Two surprises occurred when Sam and his dad brought the van home that night. The first was mom. She wasn't too happy about the "motel on wheels". Actually it took her a few months to get used to the idea. Sam had convinced her it was for all of the camping he and his friends were going to do along the coast for surfing. The second surprise was what the actual color looked like during the day. Sam was shocked that the deep purple he saw the night he bought it turned out to be more Fuchsia in daylight, but he was the only one among his friends with "a surfer van". So, the color was tolerable.

As graduation loomed closer, the Friday night parties got bigger and more numerous. There was plenty of beer, pot, hash, reds, and whites, but the favorite of Sam and his friends were margaritas. It was "their drink" and felt a little safer than drugs. Strangely, they all tried a little weed, but by and large stuck with the margaritas. They always seemed to find a source for the tequila. It really wasn't that hard. As luck would have it, or good sense, none of his friends ever got in trouble or drove drunk.

The approaching summer was very much anticipated. It meant freedom and adulthood. Three of Sam's friends were heading to Australia for the winter waves and the rest of his friends were deciding between college and going to Hawaii for one year...college would eventually have to wait for some of them.

For Sam, the summer out of high school brought something different into his life and it would never be the same again

### Chapter 3

### Tina

June had been hot and Tina was already showing signs of a deep tan. She was no different than most teenagers at that time. The fear of skin damage from sun exposure wouldn't hit for another 10 years. So, she had been lying around her friend's pool whenever they weren't going to the beach. Debbie and she had been best friends since they were ten years old and inseparable most of the time. Both of them were blonde, about the same height 5' 3", and wholesome looking. By and large, they were head-turners...especially Debbie. She overflowed a string bikini.

Tina had been working at the Lucky Market for almost a year before Sam walked into the store looking for a job. It was around 11 o'clock in the morning when Tina saw Sam and Jay walk into the store. She was at the opposite end of the registers bagging groceries for Lois, so they didn't notice her. They were too busy looking around for the office.

Lois was about four years older than Tina. She had studied to be a gym teacher, but never made it. She was all of 5'1" and tiny as they come, but there wasn't an ounce of fat on her. It was apparent that she was probably good at any sport she tried.

"Boy, they're sure cute, especially the short one!" exclaimed Lois as she leaned over to Tina while checking out the groceries on the register. She nodded to the far end of the registers.

Looking up, Tina saw Sam and Jay walk through the closed register line at the far end. "He is, isn't he?" said Tina smiling. "Cute butt."

"I think he's looking for a job," said Lois looking over her shoulder while pounding on the register keys.

Tina was hurriedly bagging the groceries and trying to follow Sam and Jay as they proceeded over to the doors to the back storage area. "You might be right. They did go through the doors."

Tina put the rest of the grocery bags in the cart and said goodbye to the customer. Turning back to the check stand Lois asked, "Are you and Blake still seeing each other?"

"Not really." Tina answered uncomfortably. "He's just a little too weird for me. There are times when he drinks that he gets too mean. He still calls me and wants to see me, but I'm not sure what I am going to do."

"You don't need that from a guy, Tina." Lois smiled and gestured towards the back room, "Besides maybe that guy in the tight Levi's will work here."

Tina had a short, contagious laugh. She laughed and raised her eyebrows. "Maybe," hopefully agreeing with Lois.

Meanwhile Sam and Jay had gone to the back room looking for the store office. As luck would have it, there were some openings for additional bag boys. They were handed a couple of applications and told to fill them out. Sam remembered a snack bar near the front of the store, so they decided to go there to complete them. Walking through the big swinging metal doors, they headed to the snack bar with applications in hand.

"Lois, look you were right", said Tina. "I bet those are applications."

"See I told you. Things are already looking up. Stay away from Blake. He isn't good enough for you."

"Maybe you're right." Tina watched Sam and Jay head towards the snack bar.

Sam and Jay ordered a couple of Cokes and sat down at one of the small tables that made up the snack bar. They proceeded to fill out the applications.

"You know, this is so cool to think that this job is going to start at $3.75 an hour. I've been at the shoe store for 2 years and I'm only making $2.10", said Sam.

Jay and Sam had virtually grown up together. Their houses were only four apart and their parents were good friends. Close throughout elementary and high school, they seemed to naturally follow each other through life. They were the brothers that neither one of them had. Even though Jay was slightly older, Sam often felt like the "big" brother. This was probably due to his more serious nature and smarts rather than his size since he was four inches shorter than Jay.

"I've wanted a new surfboard for a while, but couldn't afford one flipping burgers. I always liked the one you made yourself. Do you think that you could make one for me?" asked Jay.

Sam nodded while sipping his Coke. "If I can convince my Mom. She wasn't prepared for the mess when I made mine. She still tells me that she is cleaning up foam dust in the garage and she doesn't like it much since her clothes dryer is out there. "

They continued finishing the applications and took them back to the office. As they walked along the front of the store, Jay turned to Sam. "Have you seen all of the foxes working here? I must have seen four good looking chicks already just since we've been here."

Sam smiled and slightly pushed Jay on the shoulder. "I know. It is a heck of a lot better than the shoe store."

As they walked through the big metal doors to the back room there were three people on a break drinking coffee. One was Bill Giannelli, the assistant manager. He was a short, stocky man of about 50 years with a pencil thin mustache, and a full head of slicked-back, dark hair. In years to come Sam would end up working closely with Bill and come to admire him very much. Bill was from the Detroit area and occasionally hinted of Mafia connections. If nothing else the topic provided entertaining stories. He smoked Lucky Strike cigarettes like they were candy and rarely could be seen without one in his hand when he was not on the "floor" of the store.

Joan Williams was another of the people on a break. She was a real hoot...about 5'7", big and buxom with long, flaming red hair piled high on her head. She had a big laugh and a wicked sense of humor. Joan was probably in her early 30's and loved to flirt with the younger "boys" in the store. Sometimes it scared the hell out of them. In years to come, Sam always wondered if any of them would ever take her up on the offers. Bottled water wasn't common in small containers yet, so Joan always had a small plastic bottle at her check stand to quench her thirst during the day...few people knew it was Vodka.

The third person sitting there talking when Sam and Jay walked in was Tina. She was smoking, which usually turned Sam off, but she was pretty cute.

Sam and Jay said "Hi" and waved kind of shyly as they walked over to the office door. The three on break returned the "hellos" and continued on with their conversation. The store manager answered the door and invited Sam and Jay upstairs. After going over their applications, he asked when they could start work. Jay had quit his burger job a week ago so was available immediately, but Sam told the manager that it would be two weeks in order to give his notice at the shoe store. With that the manager gave them their schedules and start dates.

When Sam and Jay had left the office the three people that were on their break were gone except for Bill who was far on the other side of the back room unloading boxes from a pallet. It would be two weeks before Sam and Tina would finally meet...both looking forward to that day.

* * *

By the time that Sam went to work at Lucky Market, Tina had stopped seeing Blake permanently. When she found out that Sam was going to start working there, she didn't need to put up with Blake anymore. Besides the magic of dating someone four years older than her had worn off. For a while, it was kind of exciting. Blake was totally different than any guy she dated in high school. He was the bad boy she never gave a second thought to before. She met him four months ago at the "18 and older" nightclub with Debbie.

Shortly thereafter it became a regular thing to meet him at the club on Friday nights. He was a heavy drinker and got her introduced to gin and tonic. They'd have one in the parking lot before going into the club and then a couple more throughout the evening. A couple of months after meeting, the nights of dancing and drinking often ended early back at Blake's apartment while Debbie stayed at the club. Tina could take or leave the drinking, but the making out was exciting...kind of like forbidden fruit. Her hormones were soaring and keeping her pants on was a challenge. But, something inside kept telling her she just wasn't ready.

Blake didn't stop at just drinking. He quickly started including pot and pills into their time together, although Tina had no interest in the pills. In fact, she often wondered if she really had any interest in him. She got tired of making excuses to her parents when Blake never came to the door to pick her up for dates. She was glad he never did. It would have been embarrassing anyway. The bad boy image wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, especially after he roughed her up.

She couldn't remember much about that night. By the time they left the nightclub, she was already ripped on gin. Blake convinced her to smoke some grass. After a couple of joints, she was almost numb. She could remember struggling with Blake, but it wasn't until she woke up naked an hour later that she knew what happened. Still half loaded, she stumbled out of his bed and into the bathroom. Turning on the light, she looked at the reflection of herself in the mirror. Her hair was a mess and mascara smeared. She stared for a minute before tears started to run down her face. She felt ugly and ashamed. She wrapped her arms around herself and closed her eyes. She was no longer a virgin.

"You bastard," she yelled at Blake as he lay in bed. She started hitting him with a pillow.

"Hey, bitch. Don't be yelling at me." He put up his hands defending himself.

"You raped me," she yelled at him. She threw the pillow down and started swinging at him with her hands.

"Shit. Don't be hitting me", he said, still putting his hands up. Blake was really bombed, but was starting to get angry. "I didn't rape you. You enjoyed getting fucked. You've wanted it for some time now."

"You bastard, that's so ugly." She swung wildly at him and caught his nose with her palm.

The shock of pain in his nose cleared his head. Now, he was pissed. Launching himself out of the sheets, he slapped Tina across the face so hard she fell to the ground. She screamed and started to cry.

Tina thanked God that Debbie was still at the club when Blake dropped her off. After telling her what happened they went to a nearby coffee shop and drank coffee until they both sobered up and could go home. Luckily, she was spending the night at Debbie's. It was just what she needed tonight...her best friend. She thought how ironic it was that losing her virginity was the worst night of her life. She always imagined that it would be the most beautiful. The shower was long and the water as hot as she could stand it. Scrubbing over and over with soap, she thought about the 10 days until her next period.

Day 11 was one of her happiest days. She wasn't pregnant and knew it would be a miracle if she ever saw Blake again.

* * *

Sam's first day of work was on a Tuesday and he started at 4:00 p.m. That was generally the time that the evening crew started work. The day shift ended at 5:00 PM, whether you were part or full-time. Tina had been checking the schedule for a couple of weeks looking to see when Sam was going to start. As luck would not have it, she was getting off at 5:00. This left only an hour for her to get to meet Sam. She was a bit nervous about trying to find a way to talk to him, but Lois said that she would find a way to get them introduced. If Sam turned out to be a nice guy, Lois had promised Tina that she would make her best attempt at setting them up.

Bill Gianelli welcomed Sam at the office door. Bill was puffing on a Lucky Strike and squinting through the smoke while shaking Sam's hand. "Let's get you a work apron and give you the tour."

Sam nodded, "Thanks."

Bill went back upstairs into the office for a couple of minutes and returned with a light, green apron and a nametag. Handing it to Sam, he said, "Put this on and follow me." Before Sam could get the apron over his head, Bill was off like a shot down the back room among the pallets of groceries. He proceeded to show Sam throughout the back of the store, the frozen food locker, the dairy case, produce room, and the loading dock along the way Sam met a half dozen other employees. After about 15 minutes and two cigarettes, they were heading for the metal doors where Bill took one last puff on his Lucky Strike before crushing it into an ashtray that was hanging on the wall next to the doors. Then, they were off into the store. After a brief tour of the layout, Bill was leading Sam up front to the check stands. He was going to introduce Sam to the checkers and how to pack bags.

Bill really didn't have to show Sam how to stuff grocery bags. He generally had a senior bag person do that, but today most of the checkers were "his girls". He had hired many of them over the last few years and he treated them like daughters. Their youth kept him young, and he often teased them. They always replied in good sport. Whether it was his devilish sense of humor or his zest for life, Bill was well loved by many of the people in the store.

Bill started at the beginning of the row of 12 check stands and slowly introduced Sam to the checkers in between customers. Tina had been keeping one eye on them while she proceeded to bag for Joan Williams. Joan was a lighting fast checker and it was always a chore to keep up with her. It was somewhat of a game for Joan to always stay well ahead of the bagger. Tina had been doing an admirable job while still trying to watch Bill and Sam. By now Bill was introducing Sam to Lois who was about 3 check stands away. Even at that distance Lois' laugh could be heard. Bill must have said something mischievous. Sam was smiling, too. Tina immediately liked Sam's smile. It wasn't particularly big, but there was something warm...and shy about it.

There was only one other checkstand occupied between them now. Tina tried to relax. In a minute she would be introduced to Sam and she didn't want to make a fool of herself.

She must have looked a little more flustered than she thought because just then Joan said, "Are you a little nervous about meeting that good looking guy coming this way with Bill?"

"Am I that dorky?" Tina said with a giggle.

Joan was giving her an evil smile while pushing the groceries down towards Tina, who was trying to make more room for them. "You look like you're going to wet your pants."

"Oh God, Joan. Really?"

"Calm down, Tina. He's the one being introduced to everyone, and probably a heck of a lot more nervous than you are. Here they come." She winked at Tina, "watch your pants."

Bill and Sam walked up to the end of the checkstand. After Joan's customer left, Bill warmly introduced her and Tina to Sam. Everyone was all smiles as casual small talk was made. Through it all Sam was nervous. He had met about fifteen people in the last half-hour and remembered only about half a dozen names. Thank God for the nametags. Joan was certainly warm and friendly, he thought. Sam was always drawn to those "larger" women especially when they had an outgoing personality. He immediately knew that he and Joan would get along great.

"Bill, how about if I train this young guy to bag groceries properly?" asked Joan with a sly grin.

"Thanks anyway, Joan. I think you'd work him to a frazzle. I think I'll break him in on someone a little easier."

"Well, that won't be as fun." Joan winked at Sam. "Sam, when you're ready, come back and see if you can keep up with me."

"Heck, Joan, I've been here for a year and I can't keep up with you," said Tina.

They all laughed.

Tina was bubbly and sweet. A mere second or two went by before Sam realized what beautiful eyes she had. To say they were blue would be like calling the Grand Canyon big. They were almost translucent...a light, azure blue, wonderfully alive, and before he knew it...he was falling into them. Some people's eyes are serious. Some awake to laughter occasionally. Tina's not only had unreal color, but were alive with happiness. It was a good thing that Bill led him off to another part of the store before Sam made a complete fool of himself. If it weren't for the additional five people that Bill introduced to him, Sam would have probably kept thinking about those azure eyes.

After Bill and Sam walked off, Tina raised her eyebrows looking at Joan. Smiling she said, "Please tell me I didn't act like a piece of doo-doo."

While still pounding the cash register keys at a furious speed, Joan assured Tina that she didn't look totally like an idiot. After finishing up the customer, Tina moved off to another register to start the bagging process again. As she slipped in behind Lois' checkstand, her mind was on Sam more than the canned green beans that she put on top of the tomatoes.

Over the next couple of days Sam started to feel more comfortable with his new job. It really helped that Jay was there almost every day that he worked. The other thing that made it easy was that most of the evening staff was around the same age group, or at least within 10 years. There were about four other regular bag boys and about that same number of bag girls. The checkers were mostly under 35. The really cool thing was that of the ten or so girls that Sam and Jay worked with regularly, most were pretty good looking. But probably one of the best things about the staff was that most everyone really enjoyed each other's company.

Over the next couple of months, Sam and Jay found themselves at parties or get-togethers after work. The gathering could be anything from a large cookout to a cup of coffee at the local Denny's. It seemed funny to Sam how much coffee had become an integral part of his day since he began working there. Before then, he rarely touched the stuff. Bill Gianelli bought Sam his first cup out of the machine in the back room. When asked how he liked it, Sam didn't know what to say.

"How about sweet and light" asked Bill?

Assuming that meant cream and sugar, Sam agreed. Breaks always consisted of coffee with the often shared package of donuts or cheese-n-crackers. It wasn't particularly healthy, but it was filling and what the heck...he was only 18.

It was also apparent that when you are 18 to 25 years old and working around a bunch of good looking girls, the predominant subject is those girls...what they're wearing...who they're dating...whether they're sleeping with anyone, etc. And that's basically what the subject was quite often among Sam, Jay, and the other guys at the store. Little did they know that similar topics were discussed among the girls.

During those first few months Sam became aware of how many of the guys were fond of Tina. They often spoke of how sweet and nice she was. Other times it was how great her butt looked in a certain pair of brown denim, hip-hugger pants. Secretly, Sam didn't make any comment that might tip his feelings for he had a good size crush on Tina. He shared this only with Jay. Unfortunately, Sam was still trying to figure a way to ask her out without sounding dumb. In a group, he was fine. By himself, he stumbled over his shyness.

Up until now, he had managed to be equally nice to her and the other girls. Because of this, Sam enjoyed the comfortable conversation and friendship of many of the girls. Luckily for him...Joan and Lois had been secretly plotting with Tina for the last couple of weeks about how they were going to get them together. Who knows how long it would have taken Sam to get the nerve up to ask Tina otherwise?

Labor Day was in a week and the store was going to close at 1 o'clock. A beach party had been in the planning process for weeks.

Fred, who took care of receiving groceries off of the trucks, lived on the beach near Surfside in a little house that was left to him by his grandmother. She had been one of the original inhabitants of Sunset Beach. Fred had been her favorite grandchild and shared an equal love of the beach with her. He spent many days and nights as a child here and was deeply moved and happy that she gave him the house in her will. Fred was a friend of everyone at the store...a thirty year old hippie that had spent the "Summer of Love" in the Haight. He was always happy and peaceful, more often due to his pot smoking than anything. He seemed to always have a little plant ready for harvest in a ceramic pot in his kitchen.

Because he was off that day, Fred was going to reserve a couple of fire pits in front of his house along with the nearby volleyball court. This would be the headquarters for the beach blowout that the store was planning.

### Chapter 4

### The Beach Party

It wasn't as popular as the Huntington cliffs or pier, but parking was difficult in the Surfside and Sunset Beach area. More importantly the surf break had been badly damaged around 1969 when the Army Corp of Engineers came in and dredged the coastline in front of Sunset Beach and the Surfside "colony". The beach faced southwest and was bordered on the north by a breakwater that protected the Seal Beach Weapons Station, where the naval ships came in to load ammunitions.

The combination of the south facing beaches and the breakwater created a perfect concentration for waves especially in winter. Unfortunately, the bigger storms wreaked havoc along the beachfront, and washed away an enormous amount of sand over the years. It was not uncommon to have the sea rushing perilously close to the unprotected homes. And...since these homes were rather expensive, the residents were able to convince the state and local politicians to have the beach dredged before the place became a state disaster area as a result of a monster storm.

Sam and Jay still came there to look for surf. In fact, it became an old habit on those early surfing mornings to stop at least long enough to check out the waves at Surfside. On rare occasions there were waves, but nothing resembling the fast, crisp break of their first years surfing here when they were barely 13 years old and driven to the beach by their parents. It's a good thing that they didn't live too far from here. Along Pacific Coast Highway or PCH as they called it, Surfside was only about 6 miles from home. Sam and Jay's parents were usually not too put out in hauling them around. They often got to the beach around 7:30 and stayed till about 3:00 or 4:00. Of course by 9 or 10 o'clock the ocean was starting to get a little choppy from the wind. That screwed up the shape of the waves, but when you don't drive and rely on dear mom and dad as they did, Sam and Jay didn't mind getting there "late".

Things changed completely when Sam and Jay got their licenses and borrowed their parents' cars. The end of the surf world was no longer Huntington Pier. Sam and Jay had been waiting for a couple of years to try surfing at Trestles. They had heard stories about the long, point breaks that ran along the marine base at Camp Pendleton south of San Clemente. The problem with Trestles was getting to it. Because President Nixon's western White House was close by on a cliff overlooking Cottons, another great surf spot, the Marines patrolled the beaches regularly from Trestles to Cottons. Since the beaches were technically inside the base, surfers were trespassing. This didn't seem to stop the many surfers that eventually lost their boards while wiping out on a wave. By the time they swam to the beach to retrieve their boards, the Marines had often gotten there first. The boards were usually confiscated, and the hapless surfers escorted to the front gate. This was particularly a drag because the hike in through the "jungle" and down the cliffs to the beach was about two miles or more...depending on where you parked the car. As a result, the only surfers enjoying Trestles in those days were primarily Marines.

Sam and Jay had seen point breaks in movies such as, "The Endless Summer", but had never surfed one. A couple of years ago when they first drove through San Clemente on the 405 and saw the Pacific reaching out below them they were astounded by the long, perfect lines of waves. What was even more astonishing was the emptiness of the place. They pulled off of the exit for the San Onofre State Beach, which was a couple of miles down the frontage road. At the top of the exit was a sign that read Camp Pendleton Marine Base with an arrow pointing inland to the left. To the right was an arrow pointing to San Onofre. Going right, they slowed down as soon as they came into the view of the train trestles that gave the beach its name. They knew they were close. There really wasn't a place to park, but they pulled over into the bushes and both climbed out of the driver's side of the Mustang. Quickly running back to the bridge overlooking the trestles and the beach beyond, they heard the crashing of the waves. Then, the view of perfection...a long, curling tube about head high that seem to roll for two hundred yards off of a point almost directly in front of them.

They stood there overlooking the distant beach. The water was probably only 300 yards away, but they didn't have a clue of how to get there. Just then a Jeep drove out from under the bridge they were standing on and down the road under the trestle to a small parking lot near the sand. A couple of Marines got out and slowly made their way down to the beach.

Jay had turned to Sam, "You don't suppose your dad's naval sticker on the car and your navy I.D. will get us through the gate, do ya?"

"It just might. Let's try. All they can do is turn us away."

So they ran back to the '65 Mustang Pony and turned around for the base entrance. They felt a little nervous about this whole idea. Here they were a couple of 16 year-old kids with shoulder-length hair approaching a Marine base where kids just a couple of years older were being trained to fight in southeast Asia.

As they drove up to the gate, a stone-faced Marine stepped out of the guardhouse. He looked first at the longhaired kids in the car and the surfboards on the roof before he noticed the officer's sticker on the bumper. At that moment he stiffened up and saluted. Sam stopped the car at the gate.

Leaning down to the window, the guard politely asked him for an ID.

Sam took his wallet out of his shorts and produced his dependent's naval ID. The soldier took a short time to exam the pass and handed it back.

"What can I do for you today?"

Sam nervously asked, "We're wondering if we could go down to the beach for a while."

The marine looked at them, "Just a second, please." With that, the Marine stepped over to the guardhouse and took a 4"x 8" cardboard "Visitor Pass" out of a box and handed it to Sam, and said, "Please put this on your dashboard."

"Thanks. Thanks a lot", said Sam.

The guard saluted, stepped back again and waived them through. "That was really cool", said Jay. Sam nodded and turned the radio back on while they headed down the road and back under the trestles.

* * *

Most mornings since Surfside was dredged, waves were few and far between, but this Labor Day there was actually some pretty good surf. As usual before proceeding down to Huntington, Sam and Jay pulled into "the colony" to check out the situation. They had been planning on going down to "the pier" for a few hours and maybe having breakfast in Huntington Beach before coming back up the coast for the party. Jay was reading the addresses looking for Fred's house while Sam was slowly driving his van down the back street of the Sunset Beach colony. The address was within one block from where they used to surf, right out in front of Anderson Street where the old water tower still stood. As luck would have it, a parking space was available right outside "the colony" within a short walk to Fred's.

"That was too easy," said Sam.

"You're not kidding," agreed Jay.

With that Sam pulled into the space and parked. Turning off the key Sam said, "I know it's an outside chance, but I'd sure love to see waves here again. I'm also not looking forward to trying to get a parking space here later. It'd be great to just be able to stay until the party started."

Jay was halfway out the door, "Don't hold your breath. It would be nice, but a miracle."

Running around the corner down the short street to the beach they couldn't see the breakers until reaching a rise in the sand. It was hard to believe, but there were actually waves...good ones...maybe four to five feet. The wind was calm and it was already comfortably warm at 7:30am. They stood there for a while watching the sets come in. After about 3 minutes it was apparent that there was consistent, good surf. Just then a big swell came rolling in. The first wave was about six feet, but it was the third one that made Sam and Jay raise their arms and let out a loud hoot. That wave had to have an eight-foot face. As soon as it crashed they were running back to the van to unload their gear.

Probably one of the most appealing aspects about surfing to those that have tried it and have been doing it for years is its simplicity. It wasn't any different for Sam and Jay. Each of their backpacks had the essentials and nothing else – a towel, wetsuit, their wallets, some snacks, and a container of water. It's all they needed besides their board and wax. In 5 minutes they had the boards off of the roof racks and their packs on their backs heading for the beach.

They didn't know if it was the general excitement of decent waves and an empty beach, or the nostalgia of a few years ago when they first discovered this place. The spring in their step was there, and you never saw two people get into wet suits so fast.

They both had learned to surf near the river jetty in Seal Beach. It didn't matter that there were hundreds of other kids doing the same thing. Being cool at twelve because you were surfing was the best. The river jetty became their spot for 2 years, until a friend told them about Surfside. So, one day Jay had convinced his mom into driving them a little further down the coast. Sam and Jay were dropped off without even seeing the ocean because the row of houses blocked the view of the beach. It was so exciting when they crested the small sand dune and saw the break.

To see waves again in their old spot four years after the dredging was just outstanding. Jay was the first one into the water even though Sam begged him to stay until he had applied his routine heavy coat of wax. By the time Sam was running into the water, Jay was already taking off on his first wave and hooting with excitement. Sam watched as Jay did a sweet bottom turn and came up the face bouncing off the lip of the wave. Jay went flying by just as the wave crashed on Sam. He came out the back end immediately turning around to see the back of the wave and Jay's head disappearing and reappearing above the wave three more times. Then Sam continued to paddle out to the line-up.

He sat up waiting for his chance. It didn't take long...maybe 30 seconds. A nice wave started building. Sam turned. The wave was moving fast. Was he going to miss it? He started to stroke both arms independently, and then as the wave started lifting him from behind, he took three big strokes with his arms in unison. That was enough. The wind rushed up to his face along with the salt spray. His yellow and orange board was slipping fast down the face of the wave. It was a good one, bigger than he had expected.

He bottom turned as the wave broke behind him. The face of the wave was right in front of him now. The lip was overhead and he saw it starting to curl. Rarely had he been in that situation. He knew what was coming and wasn't sure if he was ready. The roar of the wave was closing in on him...the barrel was forming. He was scared and excited. Then the beach started to disappear and all he could see was the wave in front of him and the lip closing over. Lower he crouched for fear of being swallowed by the barrel of the wave. He was in the tube! Thoughts were racing through his mind. Could he hang on? Is the board fast enough? And then within a second or two...he was out. At the same moment the tube collapsed and spit the spray right past Sam. It was the dying gasp of a perfectly shaped wave.

The rest of the morning was filled with wonderful rides. Jay got tubed once and Sam one more time. They were alone in their element. On this Labor Day in 1973, there wasn't anything else they needed. They were enjoying the earth in its purest form of entertainment and sharing it with each other. In between waves, they sat on the boards looking out to the horizon waiting for their next rides. Their backs were warmed by the morning sun. They shared each other's joy of the day, laughed, and wondered what life would be like next summer and the many summers to come. As each one took off on another wave, the other would cheer him on, while watching from behind.

It was not uncommon for the two of them to be alone like this. They'd spend hours talking about life, their future, or saying nothing at all. Maybe there were closer friends...Sam and Jay doubted it. They just assumed that they'd always be close.

A little after ten o'clock, they had taken a few minutes to go in, eat a snack and drink some water. The beach was starting to fill in with several people. It was the holiday picnic and beach crowd. Except for the few surfers spread out down the coast, Sam and Jay were able to enjoy this wonderful day surfing alone. It was almost hard to believe. Many probably thought that waves were gone forever in Surfside. A half-hour later, Sam and Jay were once again paddling out.

Right at that time, Tina and Debbie had just arrived at Fred's house where Fred had directed them to the fire pit area that he had reserved. It was on the crest of the small sand dune near the pits that they had placed their beach chairs and towels. While trying to find a place to park, they had spotted Sam's van. It was easy to pick out. What a bizarre color...fuchsia. No wonder Sam often spoke of getting it painted, thought Tina.

From the top of the dune it was easy to watch the waves and ocean. The water was almost empty except for the two surfers that were out.

"You think that's Sam and Jay?" asked Tina.

"I can't tell. They're too far out." Debbie looked over at a couple of backpacks and beach towels not far from one of the pits. Nodding towards them, "That's probably their stuff since it was Sam's van. There can't be two vans around with that color." Smiling she said, "Let's put our stuff closer to theirs."

"How come you're so excited?" asked Tina slyly.

"I kind of like Jay", Debbie said, as she started spreading her towel out.

Smiling at her, Tina said, "You didn't tell me that?"

"It just came over me in the last couple of days. Look at those guys," she said while pointing out to them. "They must be having a blast!"

Sam and Jay were riding the same wave together having the time of their lives without knowing what was being discussed on the shore.

Gazing out to the ocean Tina said, "I bet they are." Smiling she asked, "What do you mean it just came over you in the last couple of days?"

"You think he's cute?" asked Debbie.

Turning back to the ocean and smiling, "Jay? Yeah, he's good-looking. Hey, wouldn't it be cool if we ended up dating both of them?"

Debbie was reaching into her bag for suntan lotion. "But I don't know if he has a clue that I like him. He might even have a girlfriend."

"I've never heard him say anything. So it's a pretty safe bet he hasn't got one. Guys usually talk about that. Maybe you can find out today. If he's got a girlfriend, she'll probably be here later. Don't you think?" Tina sat down and also started to put on her lotion.

"Yeah, you're probably right. What about Sam? Do you think he will ever ask you out?"

"I wish he would, but I don't know. He is so nice to the other girls at the store. For all I know he could be scamming on one of them. But...I could ask him what Jay thinks of you?"

"Oh, God, no. Well, maybe. I don't know. You think you should? How would you do that without me looking desperate?"

"Look at you, Debbie." Tina motioned to her with an open hand. "You're gorgeous. How could you look desperate? When all the guys from the store see you in that little bikini they're going to go nuts...including Jay. I just hope Sam doesn't go nuts over you, also."

"My bikini is no smaller than yours."

"Maybe, but you're falling out of yours," said Tina smiling.

"Really?" Debbie looked down at her chest briefly and then back to Tina with wrinkling her nose. "Does it look slutty?"

"No. You'll be a hit." Tina smiled back, "I'm just glad you're my friend and not hot for Sam."

In the next hour and half several of the store employees had shown up, spreading towels or blankets to "secure" their territory. Everyone was smiling and greeting each other with "high 5's" or shaking hands. Soft drinks were dumped into two big galvanized bins loaded with ice. The two fire pits already had fires going ready for barbecuing. The crowd was a good mixture of the whole staff. Not only did the younger, evening crew show up, but a large portion of the full-time day shift arrived, also. The day shift was traditionally made up of a little older crowd. Many had stayed in the business out of high school, and had families. Even some of the stocking crew from the graveyard shift was showing up.

Sam and Jay had noticed the crowd starting to gather around the reserved fire pits. More importantly they were trying to figure out who the two girls were near their towels. Even from about 200 yards the bikinis and dark tans were enticing. Sam was hoping one of them was Tina.

Except for their short break, they had been in the water now for about 4 hours and were getting tired. An offshore wind picked up and the waves were actually getting better. So, they were still getting their fair share of rides. It had been one heck of a morning. The two of them were only about 6 feet apart looking at the beach, and then turning back to the watch the swells roll in.

"You about ready to go? I'm having trouble getting my arms to paddle," said Jay chuckling. "The ol' lubber arms have set in."

"Oh, not lubber arms," laughed Sam. "Yeah, I'm about ready to go. I'm hungry, my arms don't work either, and I really want to know who is in that yellow bikini near our towels."

"You always did like yellow."

"Especially yellow bikinis on tanned skin. And that looks pretty good from here. I hope that's Tina."

Turning his board towards the beach, Jay started paddling. "Okay. See you at the towels."

Sam watched the approaching, rising swell and knew that he better start paddling for the wave as Jay had, or paddle over it. If he didn't decide quickly, he might get caught and sucked back over the falls. So, with a few strokes he gently rolled over the swell and turned around watching it rise gracefully out of the water. It was a good one...at least five feet from the back and overhead for Jay. Keeping his eye partially looking outside, he watched the swell looking for a sign of Jay. Just then he saw Jay's head bounce up over the top and then quickly disappear. It looked like he was getting a good ride.

Jay was ripping up the wave pretty good and Debbie was pointing that fact out to Tina. The wave was over Jay's head and he was making the most of it. The waves had been getting steeper and were hollowing out as the day wore on as a result of the hot Santa Ana winds blowing off the desert and offshore directly into the face of the waves. Jay took a big sweeping bottom turn to the right and zoomed across the face of the wave. When he was safely ahead of the break he cut back, down and to the left. When the barrel approached he quickly snapped his board back to the right and up the face hitting the lip. That was when Sam saw Jay's head from behind the wave.

Jay gently let his board release off the top of the wave and eased down into the curl. He had lost count of how many waves he had ridden that morning, but this was it. Even though he was beat and tired, he was going into the barrel one more time. The roar of the wave sent a shiver up his neck. The lip closed in...and he was covered. Out of the left corner of his eye he could barely see the blurred shore through the wall of water enclosing him. He crouched lower as the tube was getting smaller. Would he make it? He leaned farther forward to speed up. The subtle shift was the difference between a perfect ride and a colossal wipeout. Either way the people on the shore were going to be thrilled.

Debbie was certainly thrilled. Pointing to Jay, she exclaimed, "Look at Jay! He disappeared! Did he make it?" She was holding her hands to mouth.

Just as the wave was closing in, Jay shot out of the wave. He stood almost straight up, arched his back with his chest outward, and relaxed with his arms casually hanging by his side as he rode up and over the end of the wave.

"There he is! He made it.... I've never seen anyone getting covered like that and come out," said Tina.

There were actually many people on the beach that had been watching. The waves were bigger than many of them had ever seen before primarily because so many of them were from the inland neighborhoods. Some were pointing at Jay. Others were grabbing their friends in anxiousness, while a few were really exhilarated.

Jay came to a slow stop, calmly bent over and sat down on his board grabbing the front of it with both hands. He was stoked. It was the best ride he had all day and he wanted to share it with his best friend. He was probably twenty yards from shore now facing outside looking at Sam.

As soon as Jay had kicked out of the wave and looked back, Sam raised both hands over his head in triumph for Jay. Jay waved back, acknowledging. They were so close...as close as brothers.

After seeing Jay wave back, Sam turned around and his attention was on the swells continuing to roll in. He looked up and down the beach. There were a few more surfers in the water here and there. It was amazing that it took this long for the others to show up considering the wave quality. Glancing at his watch he saw that it was almost noon. Most of the time, the waves would be blown out by now. Sam wondered how long it could pump like this. It had been months since a swell like this had come through southern California...much longer here at Surfside.

Alone, outside the break...he felt a sense of inner peace...and expectation. The ocean always made him feel close to the earth and his God. Even when the surf was poor, it was good to paddle out and sit on his board listening to the roll of the ocean, crash of the waves, and occasional sea gull. He never tired of the smell of the salt water in his nostrils and the expectation of a good ride.

He was anxious with anticipation...not from the big surf, but what lay ahead for the rest of the day. He knew there would be a lot of laughs and good times with friends, but it was the thought of Tina that kept him on edge. Like all young guys his age, he loved looking at girls in bikinis and this would be the first time he saw her in one. Then he realized that he was nervous about being close to her, away from the familiar workplace.

The sudden rise of the next swell snapped him out of that daze. A set was coming in. Looking outside he could already see four...maybe five swells. Seeing them from that distance meant this set was bigger than the others had been. He started paddling out...as fast as his rubbery arms, or lubber arms, as Jay called them, could paddle.

Jay had drifted into shore and was just walking out of the water with board in hand when he turned to see Sam paddle out. Tina and Debbie were standing now and looking out. In fact, many of the beachcombers were looking outside at the lone surfer paddling over the oncoming swell. Other employees that had arrived were all turning to look. Some were walking off of the dune and down to the shore to get a closer look.

Sam's heart started to pound with anxiety as he rolled over the second wave. That one too was a nice one...probably six feet from the back and nine or more from the front. Each oncoming wave was bigger and Sam could now see at least three more rolling in. That was good...maybe. In any event, Sam had no choice. If he stayed where he was, he was in danger of the next wave breaking on him...not particularly inviting at this size.

The third one was swelling up fast and seemed about the same size as the last. His arms felt like lead weights. There didn't seem to be any power left in them. The four hours had taken its toll. Struggling with every stroke, he paddled over the wave. But this time he barely made it over. Another split second and he would have gone right over the falls...backwards...with the break.

Getting sucked back over the falls on a wave that size was not pleasant. Any number of things could happen. It was very easy to get sucked under for a while with the water churning like a giant washing machine. Drowning was possible in those situations. Falling back and having your board crash on top could bang you up pretty badly.

Sam had already broken his nose twice surfing. The first time happened that way. He was sucked back over as he was trying to paddle over a wave, but he never made it. The wave turned him upside down. As he fell backwards the board came crashing down on him. The next thing he remembered was Jay dragging him out of the shore break.

His arms were burning from exhaustion and his heart pounding from the adrenaline rush. He was either going to make it past all of them and rest or take a chance. The vision of Jay laughing when he saw Sam's nose smashed sent a smirk across his face as he saw the last two swells approaching. Was he too tired to try the next wave? If he waited for the last one, he might get another ten or fifteen seconds to rest. Sam decided this one was it. If, by chance he missed catching this one, there was always the last. Besides he didn't want to paddle all the way in from out there if he missed both of them. He was too damned tired.

The wave was building up nicely. Sam turned the nose of the board around and started paddling again. He felt like he wasn't even moving. It was as if everything was in slow motion. His arms were moving through the water, but he didn't seem to feel any movement. The swell was approaching fast. The back of the board started to rise. His speed picked up. He took one, two, three big strokes with his arms in unison. The board was slipping down the face, spraying mist in his face. He caught it perfect...long before it started to break. That was good because this wave definitely looked bigger than any others he had ridden in a long time. This wave had to have a ten foot face.

"He's got it!" yelled Tina excitedly as she pointed to Sam. "Look at the size of that wave!"

Jay was standing on the shore just above the waterline. "All right, buddy. Hang in there." He mumbled under his breath.

Sam took a big bottom turn to the right facing the wave and started back up the wall of water. It was at least four feet overhead he thought! When he was a couple feet from the lip he shifted his weight to the heels of his feet and turned left back down the wave once again.

"Nice move Sam," Jay mumbled again.

The wave was stretching out in front of Sam about 100 feet and starting to wall up fast. As he rode back up into the face again he wondered if he was going to be fast enough to escape the break. Crouching low, he raced across the face subtly moving his board up and down. From the shore it looked like he was riding over a bumpy road.

By now many other employees had seen the large swell of waves roll in. Word had spread that the two lonely surfers were Jay and Sam. With Jay safely on the beach, Sam was the focus of attention. Many of these people seldom went to the beach except for those rare occasions...and none of them surfed. So, the large waves were indeed something exotic and thrilling to them. Especially since their co-workers were actually riding them.

Unlike Jay's wave, which was a perfect peak that broke in the middle and spread evenly to each side until the wave died out, Sam's wave was building up like one long wall of water. It looked like the whole thing could break all at once with no place for him to go.

Tina started getting worried. She noticed the difference in the way Sam's wave looked compared to the others. Turning slightly to Debbie she said, "If he gets caught in that break, he could get hurt with a wave that size."

"Maybe he'll hold on. It's not breaking yet...and he is getting a good ride," said Debbie. She wasn't sure that Sam was in any danger yet.

Just then Lois came up next to Tina. Watching Sam she said, "I heard that was Sam."

"Yeah, it is", commented Tina in a matter of fact manner. She was pretty concerned about him.

"Wow. He's pretty good." Looking at Tina she noticed a frown across her brow. "You okay?"

"Is he going to make that next section of the wave? It's starting to break," said Tina with increasing anxiety.

Sam saw the section just starting to come down in front of him. He stopped moving up and down along the face and lowered himself on the board. With his left leg extended he moved forward to gain more speed. Now, he was just shooting straight across the wave about half way up the face. There was no doubt about it... it was going to break before he got ahead of it. The only question was how much was going to break in front of him. For the first time in his life he saw the tube coming well in advance.

He had two choices. The safe one was to bail out now. Dive off of the board and go deep letting the wave roll over him. The second and chancier move was to ride it out. Crouching as low as he could he stretched his left arm out in front like a knife approaching butter. It was going to be close. He was flying, his heart pounding. The roar of the crashing water was incredibly loud. This was it. He was either going to have the ride of his life or have a massive wipeout.

The wall started spilling out in front of him. Light was filtering through the wave, but the only vision he had of the world was a good ten feet in front of him. Never had he been this deep into a wave before. If it hadn't been for the size of the swell and the offshore breeze hallowing out the wave, he would have been crushed by now.

"Oh shit, Sam," said Jay. He hadn't moved an inch since Sam took off.

"Oh, God, where is he?" Tina held her hands to her mouth.

"He's got to still be standing otherwise the board would have come flying out somewhere," reasoned Lois.

"I hope you're right."

Debbie turned to Tina. "I'm going down to Jay." She turned and started running down the dune to the shore.

The tube should have been closing by now, but it continued to form. How long could he stay in there before he was swallowed? For a moment, everything stopped. There was just this tunnel of water, the roar in his ears, and the opening ten feet in front of him. Then, it started to close...fast. Sam didn't think he was going to make it. He was almost out, but the opening was almost gone. It seemed like an eternity. He felt a blast of air from behind launching him forward. And then...he was out!

Screams of cheering came up from the crowd when Sam flew out of the tube. He must have been buried in the wave for almost 10 seconds. Many of his co-workers had never seen anything like it and were utterly speechless. The guys were probably screaming with excitement louder than the girls were. Jay was raising his free hand and jumping up and down with his board in the other.

Tina turned to hug Lois. "I thought he was creamed," she said with emotion.

"Boy, you have it bad don't you?" asked Lois smiling at Tina.

Looking at Lois and nodding her head, Tina said, "What? Maybe. Yeah...I guess I do."

The last few feet Sam was holding his breath because the spray was getting so intense inside the wave. As he flew out the opening he gasped for air and thought how wonderfully exhilarating surfing was. He didn't know if he would ever have another ride like that one again...and this one still wasn't over.

By now the big waves preceding Sam's had started to back wash. That's what happened when big waves washed up higher on the beach than the normal wave breaks. As they receded off of the shore with their higher volume of water, they produced a back swell against the waves coming in from the ocean. Sometimes when they met, there was a big uprising of several feet. Sam was still flying on this wave. He had just come down from the lip and was turning left heading back down to the bottom of the wave when the backwash hit. It threw him and his board into the air. They hit the water just as the wave broke on top of him.

"What the hell was that?" Tina asked Lois.

"I don't have any idea. I never saw that before," said Lois.

Just after the backwash hit, Debbie had arrived to where Jay was standing. "What happened?" she asked him.

"Backwash...happens after a big set comes in." Jay said without his eyes leaving Sam. "Where is he?"

Sam came down right on his board. His head hitting it just as the wave landed on top of him. He was thrown under water where he was tumbling around like an old T-shirt in a washing machine. Luckily, he wasn't knocked out, but his head hurt like hell. Only right now he was trying to claw his way through the water to the surface. The backwash took him by surprise so he didn't have time to catch a big breath. It only took him about five seconds or so to find the surface, but by then his lungs were burning for air.

As the wave passed over him, it obstructed the view from the shore. Tina and many others couldn't see Sam poke his head above the water behind the wave. All they saw was the board being thrown around in front of the wave as it got closer and closer to shore.

"Where is he?" said Tina worrying.

Lois had her left arm on Tina's shoulder, "Just a minute. Let's not panic."

"There he is," said someone off to the side.

"Look, right there!" Lois exclaimed pointing to Sam with her right hand.

"Thank, God." sighed Tina.

Smiling, Lois looked at Tina. "We definitely got to get you two together."

Tina nodded in agreement with a worried smile on her face.

Besides his head hurting and being very tired, Sam was okay. He rode a big one, was tubed like he had never dreamed, and survived. Life was good. He had thirty yards to the shore and that was it. He could relax the rest of the day.

Jay turned to Debbie. "Can you carry this board?"

"Sure."

Jay ran about ten steps to his right and walked into the water where Sam's board was washing up. Picking it up, he waded into waist deep water waiting for Sam.

The swim in wasn't too bad. By now the last wave of the set had broken and Sam bodysurfed into shore. It wasn't long before he was standing up in front of Jay, smiling.

"Hell of a wave," smirked Jay.

"It looked like yours was pretty good."

"Well, I did get tubed, but not like you...but I also didn't get launched off of my board like you.'

"I noticed that," laughed said Sam.

"Hey what happened to your head? You're bleeding."

"What?" Sam touched his head feeling for blood. When he found the spot where he hit the board he brought his hand away and looked at his fingers. They were bloody. "I hit the board when I got creamed."

"You okay?"

"A little bump, but yeah, I'm fine."

Smiling Jay said, "Well at least I don't have to fish you out of the water with a broken nose in front of all of those people."

Grinning, Sam said, "That would be embarrassing." Nodding back at Debbie on shore. "Especially with a string bikini like that nearby."

Jay cocked his head a bit and smiled. "Amazing isn't it." Almost surprised he said, "I think she likes me."

"You always were the lucky one."

Nodding in agreement with a smile, Jay said, "Yeah, you're right. Let's go in. I'm tired and hungry."

"Yeah, me too...and I could probably use some ice on my head."

Jay handed over Sam's board to him. As they started walking into shore, Sam looked at Debbie waiting with Jay's board under her arm.

"She makes a nice caddy," said Sam with a sly grin on his face. "Where can I get one of those?"

"I think there's one waiting for you up on the sand."

Debbie had walked towards them and was now in ankle-deep water, waiting. As Sam and Jay walked up, Jay reached out to take his board.

"Thanks for holding this, Debbie."

"No problem. Oh, Sam. You're hurt."

"It's okay...really. I just hit my board when I fell."

"You sure?"

"I'm fine. Hey, Debbie, is Tina here with you?"

Smiling back at him, Debbie said, "Yeah, she's up by the fire pits."

They climbed up the beach slope toward the fire pits. By now there were about 30 people around the area...either employees or family members. Tina had started walking to the three of them. When she saw blood on Sam's forehead she picked up her pace over the last couple of steps. She gently raised a hand to his right temple near his hairline.

"Sam, you're hurt."

As soon as she said this, her eyes dropped from his head to his eyes. At that moment Sam's had locked onto hers. A couple of seconds must have gone by before either one of them moved.

Her azure eyes captured his heart. "Just a little headache...I could use an aspirin."

"Let's go see if Fred has any at the house...maybe a Band-Aid, too."

They started off toward the fire pits without ever saying a word to Jay and Debbie.

Looking at each other, Jay smiled to Debbie. "What do you think about that?"

"She likes him...a lot...and she's probably glad he wasn't hurt. Hey, that was a great ride you had."

"Thanks, it's been far out all morning. Haven't seen surf like this for months. Looks like the party is starting to roll. "

"Let's go see," she said.

As they headed for the party, Debbie commented that she'd never seen surf that big. Jay was pretty jazzed that she was excited about the waves and his ride. Half way through the conversation he realized he must have sounded a bit dorky. If it had been Sam, they would have been going on for hours. But this was a little different. Jay had spoken to Debbie quite a bit at work, but had not been prepared for her to look like this and to be paying that much attention to him. So he did his best and proceeded up to the barbecue that looked well on its way.

After he put his board down next to his towel and backpack, Tina took Sam over to the nearest pit where Fred was tending to the fire. While Tina asked him if he had any aspirin at the house, several other members of the crew came over to congratulate Sam on what a great ride he had.

Patting him on the back, they were amazed how he was covered by the wave for so long and then shot out like a cannon ball. Some of the girls were concerned about the blood, while the guys were mostly kidding him about the sensational wipeout.

As soon as Fred told Tina where to find the aspirin, she grabbed Sam's left arm and slightly tugged at him, "Come on. Fred told me where he keeps the aspirin and Band-Aids."

The catcalls and kidding started immediately from the group of guys. He smiled with a little embarrassment and proceeded to let Tina lead him to Fred's house.

Looking back over her shoulder, she said mischievously, "Don't worry...I'll bring him back in one piece."

"That's too bad," joked Sam with grin.

Tina smiled at him and gently slapped him on the chest.

It was one of the smaller homes on the beach. The original ones usually were. Many of them had either been remodeled or torn down for complete rebuilding. The front door was in between two large windows, which had to provide spectacular views of sunsets over the ocean. The yard, such as it was, was separated from the sand by a three-foot picket fence that was in dire need of some paint. The salt air and sun had taken its toll over the years. The fence had a small gate to enter the yard. It hung on rusty hinges badly needing some screws. The yard was a small patch of grass with some flowers along either side. As Tina entered the yard she seemed to remember Fred saying that his grandmother had wonderful flowers at the house. Off to the left was a small wood patio table with two chairs.

There was one step from the yard into the house through a screen door. The wide, wooden plank floor had recently been refinished. The entry bisected the room in half. Off to the right was the living room and to the left was the dining area. Beyond the dining area was a counter bar that separated the kitchen. The house was surprisingly orderly. The furniture was comfortable and perfect for the setting. Wicker was the predominant style in the dining area. The table was a round, glass top sitting on a wooden barrel. High-backed wicker chairs surrounded it. The couch in the living room was old, but comfortable looking. Made from soft leather, it was low to the floor and faced the picture window and the beach beyond. A couple of large tapestry throw pillows were on either side of the couch.

The room was full of hanging plants. Baskets hung on the wall. Record albums lined the shelves, which were nothing more than boards on cinder blocks. A stereo unit was on one of the shelves. A small portable TV was off to the side sitting on top of milk crate...probably compliments of the store. In the corner by the front window was a small, circular fireplace, which was just right to warm up the small house on a cold, damp winter day. In front of the couch was a driftwood coffee table with a glass top. Over off to the side of the records near a beanbag chair was an acoustic guitar in its stand, ready to be played.

After walking in, Tina saw the hallway going back between the living room and the kitchen. "It's in the medicine cabinet down this hall," she said.

"What a cool place. I'd love to live in house like this " said Sam as he entered.

He gazed around thinking how great it would be to have a little place like this right on the beach. Waves at your door and fresh sea air coming through the windows. He loved its simple comfortable charm. As he followed her to the back of the house the last thought on his mind was the guitar.

The hallway went past a stairwell on the right leading to the second floor bedroom and bath. Just beyond the stairwell was a bathroom, which adjoined another bedroom at the end of the hallway. Tina entered and immediately opened up the medicine cabinet. She quickly found the aspirin. Opening the bottle she gave two to Sam. While he turned on the faucet for some water, she opened up the bottom right hand drawer taking out some hydrogen peroxide and then a box of Band-Aids that she set on the counter.

Sam should have been a little embarrassed, but instead was really enjoying all of Tina's attention. He didn't know what to say even though he knew what he was feeling. She had opened up the peroxide and was now getting a tissue from the roll of toilet paper.

"Let me clean that off a little before I put a Band-Aid on it. Why don't you sit on the toilet seat?"

Sitting down, he started to tap his fingers on the counter trying desperately not to look or say something stupid. "Is that going to burn?" Oh, great, he thought. Now, I sound like a wimp.

Smiling down at him, Tina said, "I doubt it, but if it does...I'll blow on it." She winked at him.

Sam glanced up into her eyes for split second, and then quickly looked down.

She dabbed the cut with the peroxide tissue. As she was wiping away the blood, she said, "Actually it's a pretty clean cut."

"Oh, that's good." Another piece of fascinating conversation thought Sam. He was really nervous. His eyes were inches from her soft skin. Finally, getting his calm he looked up into her eyes. "Thanks, Tina. I really appreciate it."

Tina smiled at him, and threw the tissue in the trash next to the sink. She reached for the box of Band-Aids. Taking out a small one, she unwrapped it and placed it carefully on the cut.

Looking back into his eyes, she said with affection, "I'm happy to do it."

She paused for a couple of seconds looking back into his gaze. "You ok?"

Smiling, he answered. "Just enjoying the moment."

Now, she was embarrassed, but her heart leapt into her throat. "Shall we see how the barbecue is going?"

Sam nodded back to her and without any hesitation she gently pushed him out the bathroom door. Walking through the living room on the way out the door, Sam commented about how peaceful he thought this place was and how lucky Fred was to have it.

Tina replied, "Maybe you could find a place like this one day."

"I doubt it. Houses along the beach aren't exactly cheap."

"You're not going to work as a box boy all your life...are you?"

Actually, Sam wasn't sure what he was going to do. College was looming right in front of him and he was unsure about his future. "Well, I hope not."

"Then who knows, maybe you'll make lots of money and have one of these real big houses." Tina pointed at the two houses just down from Fred's. Both were extremely nice and fell into the category as a teardown and rebuild. "If you want something bad enough, go after it. Don't limit yourself."

As they headed back to the party Sam was thinking about what Tina had just said. For some reason he didn't expect to hear that from her. More importantly, it got him thinking. What was he going to do as he got older?

The party was going strong now. More people had arrived in the ten minutes that Sam and Tina were away. As they walked towards the scene, they noticed that their towels were no longer off to themselves. Surrounding them were many other employees with their blankets or towels. Some brought beach chairs. Others had chaise lounges. Both of the fire pits were going strong with many people cooking burgers or hot dogs. The _Eagles_ were blaring on the radio...and Jay and Debbie were sitting down and talking. Debbie was drinking a can of Pepsi with her left hand. As she spotted Tina and Sam walking up, she instantly smiled and waved with her right hand holding a cigarette. Jay turned at her motion and immediately raised his eyebrows at them as a sign of greeting as they walked up.

Looking at Sam, Jay said, "It looks like you are in good hands. Are you okay?"

Smiling, Sam said, "A small bump."

"I wonder how you would have fixed a broken nose, Tina?" asked Jay while slightly laughing.

She looked at him with a questioning look.

"As I remember," said Sam, "she couldn't have been any worse than you. You handed me my towel and told me to hold it up to my face so I wouldn't bleed in your car."

"Well! It is a 'Cuda and I didn't want blood on the seats," laughed Jay.

"Did you break your nose?" asked Tina.

Pointing to Sam's nose, Jay smiled, "You don't think that's natural...do you?"

"Looks okay to me."

"Well, thanks," said Sam. "Yeah. I broke it a couple of years ago at Bolsa Chica. I was knocked out completely. Luckily, Jay was there to pull me out of the water."

"You're my buddy. Besides it would have been hard to explain to your parents why I didn't you bring home. After all, they knew you left with me," joked Jay.

"Hey, are you guys ready to eat?" asked Debbie. "Tina and I brought more than enough burgers for all of us," as she put down her Pepsi and started rummaging around in their ice chest.

"We were going to walk up to the beach market on the corner and get some things," said Jay pointing back to the houses.

"No, really. We have plenty. We got chips and potato salad, too!" exclaimed Tina.

"Well, how about sodas?" asked Sam. "Should we go get some of those?"

Shaking her head, Tina said, "Bill Gianelli said that he would supply all of the soda from the store. Look over there. See those two metal tubs. They're filled with soda."

"Okay...that sounds great! I'm starved and would love a burger."

"Why don't you go get some sodas for you and Tina," said Debbie to Sam. "When you get back, you and Jay can barbecue the burgers while Tina and I get the buns, potato salad, and the other stuff set up on the towels."

With that Sam got up asking Tina what she wanted to drink. "Either a Coke or Dr. Pepper," she said.

Jay followed Sam over to the metal tubs filled with ice and sodas, which were centrally located among the crowd. As they walked up, Sam began fishing around in the ice for a couple of Dr. Peppers.

Bill Gianelli walked up. It was the first time that either Sam or Jay had seen him away from work. He had a pair of plaid shorts on and a beautiful Hawaiian print tank top. Surprisingly, he looked in great shape. His legs were smooth and powerful looking with muscular thighs and calves. His shoulders and biceps were not huge, but certainly solid. Bill had his ever-present Lucky Strike cupped in his right hand.

"You kids can really surf," Bill said with a twinkle in his eyes. "I swear I thought both of you were goners when those waves broke over you. I've never seen anything like it, and I don't think most of these people have ever seen it either," he said waving his hand at the crowd of people. Cocking his head off to one side. "Are you guys going to break those two hearts over there?" he asked pointing his hand with the cigarette towards Tina and Debbie.

Sam and Jay looked at each other and grinned. Jay said, "We don't have any plans, Bill. In fact, Debbie took me by surprise today actually. Sam on the other hand might have something up his sleeve. He's a bit of a heart-breaker."

Sam looked at him with a furrowing brow. "What are you talking about?" He then looked at Bill who was staring right at him with a raised eyebrow. "Jay, you know I've been trying to find the guts to ask Tina out for weeks. Besides why would I want to hurt her?"

"Well, you better not," said Bill. He loved to "yank the chain" of young boys, especially when it came to "his girls". It was all in good fun, whether or not Sam and Jay knew it. "You know those two girls are like my daughters. They're both sweethearts and don't deserve any boy problems. Got that!" he said with narrowing eyes.

Smiling at Bill, Jay and Sam both said, "Yes, sir."

"Good...now get yourself a drink and get back to them. They're looking at you two with hungry eyes!" said Bill laughing.

As Sam retrieved a couple of sodas from the tub of ice, Bill asked "Hey...are you going out surfing again later? I'd like to watch you some more."

"Maybe," said Sam. "We'll see how the day goes."

"Fair enough", Bill said as he turned back to the crowd around the BBQ.

Sam found a couple of Dr. Peppers and returned to Tina and the towels. When they got back, the girls had already made six hamburger patties. The plates were spread on the towels along with plastic silverware and a bag of potato chips.

Lifting up the plate of burgers to Sam, Tina said, "Here you go. We made two for each of you."

Sam thought how bright her eyes were. Could it be that she was interested in him or was she being nice because Debbie was obviously hot for Jay? Sam had been fretting for weeks about how to ask her out. Up till now they had had a good friendship. While at work or other social events they had always joked or talked casually. That had been relatively easy because the conversation was light and non-committal. Today it looked like she actually wanted to get a little closer.

"Two sounds great to me," said Jay. "How do you girls want yours done?"

"Medium for me," said Debbie.

"Me too," said Tina.

"Ok, we're off to the fire pits," said Sam turning away.

At the fire pits, Sam and Jay were treated kind of like celebrities for their surfing ability. People wanted to know what it felt like to ride on the "inside of the wave" or was it a normal thing that happened. Sam was ribbed about his wipeout and the conspicuous Band-Aid. Of course, Jay joined in with the others and was relentless about how Sam should be more careful about wiping out. He also joked that it was a pretty lame stunt to make girls sympathetic because of his "injury". All in all, the fire pits were loud with laughter while the burgers and hotdogs sizzled on the grill.

With burgers in hand, the two heroes went back to the towels. Debbie and Tina had put together a lunch that included tomato slices and lettuce along with pickles for the burgers, potato salad, and chips. It was far better than anything Sam and Jay would have prepared for a day at the beach. Their usual lunch consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Lunch went on for about an hour throughout the camp. Little by little, people were finishing and starting to stir. Frisbees were being thrown and a football was being tossed, but the real action had started to take place around the volleyball court. While two teams had started playing, there were two others waiting. It would be two hours before the competition would end.

Sam and Tina ended up being on one of the teams that were waiting to play, while Jay and Debbie were playing in the first game. During the wait of that first game, Sam and Tina sat on the edge of the crowd talking. Little by little their nervousness and apprehension started to fade. Conversation started to come easy. Every once in a while they would get caught up in a discussion with others close by, but whenever possible they retreated back to talking to one another.

"So, you start school tomorrow?" asked Tina.

"Actually, on Wednesday. I'm going in tomorrow to find my classrooms. Long Beach State is so huge compared to Wilson High," replied Sam.

"What are you majoring in?"

"Well, officially I'm a business student, but that's more of a safe bet than anything else. Liberal Arts or Science didn't really attract me. What made you decide not to go to college, Tina?" asked Sam.

"Oh, I guess two things really. First, I just don't have a burning desire to go back to school anymore. I guess I get too bored. Don't get me wrong. I actually got pretty good grades in high school. It's just that I like working. And now that I'm starting to cashier, the money is getting pretty decent especially with the benefits."

"What's the second thing?"

With a wink and smile she continued, "This may sound kind of silly so don't laugh or I'll never tell you anything again. I'd like to have a family and be as happily married as my mom and dad."

Sam never heard that before from a girl...at least directly put that way. Well, maybe when he was around 10 he'd heard it before. Some of his dates had some fantasy dreams of big houses, lots of money, or a famous husband, but for some reason the tone and message in Tina's voice sounded simpler and very sincere.

"You don't think you can have a career and a family?"

"Oh sure, I just don't want to. If I'm going to have a family, that will be my focus...my career. Don't get me wrong, I'll still work if it's needed to help out with the expenses. I'll probably work just to keep a fresh perspective at home. Who knows? Maybe I'll go back to school later. Just not now."

Sam was looking at Tina a bit dazed.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked smiling. Then, she laughed. "Don't worry. I'm not hunting for a husband."

"Whew, that's a relief," smiled Sam.

Elbowing him in the side, she laughed "You pig. I'm not good enough for you?"

Actually, she was more than good enough for him thought Sam. Not only was she his dream girl...petite, blonde, and pretty, but she spoke well and was very focused. And every minute that he spent with her he slipped further into those azure eyes.

"Wow, you're just incredibly focused...definitely more than I am. I'm going to school because I know education will be important for me in the future if I'm going to afford even a little house on the beach like that," said Sam pointing to Fred's beach house. "But I don't have a clue about anything specific about my future plans."

Tina smiled at him coyly, "You never thought about getting married?"

"Oh, sure. I guess I think more about having a girlfriend first. Hey! How do you do that?"

"Do what?" she winked.

Smiling back at her, "Get me to start thinking about my future?"

"What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing really, I guess. It's just that I've never had a conversation like this with anyone before...except maybe Jay."

"You didn't talk about your future with past girlfriends?"

Sam was surprised how she just gets to the point. "No, not really. What about you? Any discussions with boyfriends?"

Her azure eyes lit up and almost burned him down to his soul. "That's why I'm here alone...and talking to you, Sam. I haven't come across a boy that's mature enough to talk to."

"Next game", someone yelled.

_Shit!_ thought Sam. He was just getting to know her. _Was that a hint like I think it was?_ he wondered as he watched that yellow bikini make its way onto the sand court ahead of him.

She sure didn't act or talk like she just got out of high school...at least compared to the girls that he knew. Well, except Karen Hallibee, but she was a bookworm anyway. In fact, the more he thought about Tina's conversation the more he was sure that she was more mature than him. That made him a little uncomfortable.

Bummed that the game interrupted their conversation, Sam followed Tina onto the court. Little did he know that Tina was thinking the same thing. Luckily, their team lost, which meant they sat out the rest of the competition. Sam wondered if anyone noticed that he missed two easy plays on purpose.

Back alongside the court, it didn't take Sam and Tina long to lapse back into conversation. The next hour went by so fast. Even though the party was loud with the radio, the game, and all of the other activity, it was muted to Sam and Tina. They were so heavily focused on each other they barely heard the surrounding noise.

Sam was ecstatic inside without trying to appear so. She was just too good to be true. As the time passed by there on the sand, he found Tina easier to talk to. She was incredibly sweet and genuine, not shallow like most girls her age. She definitely seemed more grounded.

She talked more about her family and close friends. She had dreams that didn't involve a lot of money or clothes or an expensive home. She was very content to live life in much the same way her mom and dad had. It was obvious that they were very important to her. They were typical working, middle class with an average house and average struggles, but they were very happy. They believed in tight knit families spending time together including praying as a family at least once a week.

In all of her life, Tina never remembered her parents being upset with each other. She wanted that kind of happiness, too. It was unique to her since most of her friends had either broken homes or parents that often bickered.

One thought kept coming back to Sam. "How in the hell could he get someone like her to like him?"

The party continued into the afternoon without any signs of let up. In fact, after 3:00 o'clock another group of employees showed up that had been working until the store closed at 1:00.

About 5:30 Sam and Jay went out surfing one more time. The girls followed them down towards the shore and spread their towels out about 50 feet or so from the water's edge. There were a few more surfers in the water, but they were down the beach about 150 yards. Sam thought how amazing it was that surf this good went largely unnoticed. The waves were still breaking consistently five to seven feet high and that afternoon's session proceeded along much like the morning. Sam and Jay continued to have an extraordinary day on the boards.

Every now and then, they would look over their shoulders back at the shore. Each time there was a bit of relief and happiness inside because Tina and Debbie were still sitting on their towels close to the water watching them.

About an hour went by and after catching a wave, Sam paddled back to Jay who was sitting up and facing the ocean's horizon in search of the next set. Sam was grinning ear to ear. "Cowabunga! That was a good wave! Quick and clean. I love it when they form the perfect peak and don't break in front of you." He was slightly out of breath when he finally sat up.

"So, you're having a good day is that what you're saying?" asked Jay with a shit-eating grin.

"One of the best."

"Because of that wave or that tasty little, yellow bikini waiting for you on shore?" asked Jay nodding his head to the beach.

Sam looked back at Tina. She was waving to him. He waved back. Turning to Jay. "Well, she might have something to do with it, but the wave was pretty good, too."

"Okay, the wave wasn't bad either," conceded Jay.

"Hey, Debbie looks pretty hot, too. Don't tell me you're not turned on by her. You'd be the only guy at that party that hasn't noticed those yaahbos."

"Oh, yeah, I've noticed," said Jay nodding his head. "And, as much as I like to look at them, I'm really enjoying talking to her. She's funny and makes me laugh. But I'm talking about you and Tina."

Smiling at Sam, Jay turned to catch the next wave coming. "Tina's a fox, Sam, and she's not a ding-dong. My guess is that you like her a lot, and I know you better than anyone. You better grab her before someone else does. There's a lot of guys out there that would love to get hold of that."

Jay started paddling.

The last thing Sam heard from Jay as the swell rolled by was, "See you on the shore." As Jay disappeared there was a faint, "I'm going to see how Debbie is doing."

The laughter at the pits got louder along with the music. By the time the four of them made their way back to the camp, the fire pits were going again. It was time for dinner.

After everyone had eaten, the small barbecue fires were replaced with larger bonfires. Pallets from the store's stockroom burned hot and long. The sun was low in the sky and setting over the ocean. The water was lit up with a twinkling yellow carpet to the horizon. A slight marine layer was coming in off of the ocean and chilling the air just a bit. Combined with the light smog, it made for a beautiful sunset. Amazingly, there was no wind that night. So whatever smoke there was from the fires rose directly up into the sky. As a result, people started congregating close around the warm fires.

Fred was an accomplished guitarist and had played in clubs and on the street corners of San Francisco in his younger years. He never lost his touch and had a knack for knowing when to break out his guitar. This early evening around the fires was perfect for it. He played for about a half-hour to the applause from his fellow workers. Some of his songs were comical party songs that provided lots of laughter and others were popular rock 'n' roll hits that everyone sang along with the words.

Over the last several hours, Jay and Debbie had been getting along pretty well. It was like two people who had just found a really good friend. Ironically, they were initially attracted to each other physically, but they were surprised how much they had in common.

On the other hand, Sam and Tina were heading down a direct path without even knowing it. Neither one of them was trying to be too obvious about their growing affection for each other...even though everyone else at the beach party knew what was happening. They had been talking on and off for hours. If one strayed or was pulled into another group or conversation, the other eventually showed up nearby. Both of them were being attentive. Sam had raced back to his van for an extra jacket for Tina because she had forgotten to bring one. Tina was checking to see if he needed more aspirin, or that he had a soda whenever she went for one.

It was the guitar that sealed the start of their relationship. Once again, it was Jay who knowingly helping out.

While Fred was playing the guitar, Jay thought of his best friend. Sam had been playing the guitar for years, but seldom, if ever, publicly. Jay knew that he would play for hours in his room, or evenings on the lifeguard stands down on Belmont Beach. To Jay's knowledge he was the only one who had ever heard Sam play other than Sam's parents.

It wasn't until they had taken an overnight surf trip down to _Cottons_ , just below President Nixon's western white house that he found out how well Sam played. Actually, it wasn't how well Sam played, but how moving the songs were when he sang.

It was unusual, but Sam included his guitar while packing his van for that trip. On the second night, Sam pulled the guitar out of its case and started playing. He sang a couple of popular songs at first, and then he started singing and playing songs that Jay had never heard. Two of them were soulful, love ballads about the search for true love, and another was about a young man's loss of innocence fighting in a war. Under the stars with no other sound but the surf, he sat there listening to Sam. Normally cheery and good-spirited, he seldom if ever was moved to tears. That night was different. Jay sat there looking out to sea trying not to wipe away the lone tear that had run down his cheek.

There were still about 30 people around the fires still talking and carrying on. Slowly, people were packing up, but no one was in any particular hurry. The summer evening had just started to get dark. The stars were just beginning to twinkle overhead. It had been a fun time and everyone seemed to have enjoyed themselves.

Tina and Sam had just started walking up from the shore. During the fifteen minutes that they were gone, Jay had walked over to Fred and asked if it was okay to borrow his guitar for Sam to play. As Sam walked up to the towels, Jay handed it to him.

"Why don't you play a couple of songs, Sam?" asked Jay.

Looking at Tina and then Debbie who was sitting on the towels, Sam felt a little embarrassed and uncomfortable.

"You play the guitar, Sam?" asked Tina.

He never played in front of people. He had enjoyed most forms of music. Growing up with older sisters, he loved Elvis and Ricky Nelson. As he got older, the British Invasion hit and he was never the same after he saw _The Beatles_ on the Ed Sullivan show. He really liked the rock and roll from the 60's along with some of the present day stuff. He had begged his Dad for a guitar and was shocked the day he brought one home for his 11th birthday. Since then, he played almost daily. He didn't think that he was any good, but he was happy playing it for himself. He didn't even like playing for his parents, but he wrote his first song, if you could call it that, at age 12.

"Well...I play a little," said Sam hesitantly. "I wouldn't know what to play," said Sam reluctantly while holding his hand up as Jay offering the guitar. "I'm not that good."

Jay looked at Sam as he sat down near Debbie. Pointing at Sam he said, "You know I never told you this, but remember the night that you played your guitar when we camped below Nixon's house?"

"Nixon's house?" asked Debbie.

"Down in San Clemente. Nixon has a beautiful home on top of a cliff overlooking a great surfing spot," explained Jay.

"What about the trip?" asked Sam.

"I had never heard you play before. Actually, I was surprised that you even brought your guitar with us on the trip. We had finished dinner, and I was just staring out to sea enjoying the night and the crashing of the waves when you started playing. I don't remember the first couple of songs you sang, but I do remember the last few. They were some that you had written. Play one of those."

"Why one of those?" asked Sam.

"Just play one of those," grinned Jay. "Tina might like one of them." He winked at Sam.

Sam smiled and looked down at the ground for second, and then sat down across from Jay and Debbie.

Getting comfortable Sam said, "You know. It was a pretty cool party up until now. I could ruin it."

"If anyone laughs, I'll throw them in the water," said Jay smiling. "And you know I could do it."

Tina sat down off to the side of Sam. Sam looked at Tina, took a deep breath, and then started playing. Sam sang of a true love that was lost and the hurt it left behind. It was a haunting, pretty melody that he finger picked. His phrasing was perfect.

" _You're never too old...to learn._

Life... has its little ways.

And it seems you're always... getting burned.

Love... shouldn't be this way."

A couple of people at a time starting turning their heads towards the little group centered around Sam. Little by little they made their way over to them.

" _So, you sit. Very confused._

The pain within... hurts so much.

You ask yourself, "Why?" I feel so used.

Love... shouldn't be abused."

By the time Sam had finished the rest of the song, there were about a dozen people around him. As he finished, Tina started clapping and the others followed.

"That was so beautiful...you wrote that?" she asked.

Nodding to her, Sam said, "Yeah."

"How about that war song? The one you wrote for Vietnam vets...the one about the loss of innocence?" asked Jay.

Sam knew that Jay didn't get too serious about many things. So, he must have really liked that song. It was one of Sam's favorites also. Hearing it, most people would probably think of Vietnam. Actually, it wasn't just Vietnam. It was a general feeling that Sam felt about the fear and loneliness of what it must have been like knowing someone across the field or in the jungle wanted to kill you. His father really triggered the emotions in Sam when he relayed some of his own feelings about his time in Korea. Writing it was relatively easy with Vietnam raging on the news for so many years. It flowed out of Sam one night on the lifeguard stand near his house. Sam found it hard to say "No" to Jay...so he started playing once again.

Tina had already fallen for Sam by mid-afternoon, especially after the comical volleyball game they had played. He was athletic, but funny, and always had a nice word to say when she goofed. He didn't take the game too seriously, which she found attractive.

Now, as he played the guitar, she looked at him in a different light. Here was a cute guy that was polite, smart, respected people, and had a comfortable, but quiet way about him. He wasn't real talkative like herself, but somehow that was okay. When he did say something, there was a lot of meaning behind it.

As she had listened to the words coming out of his mouth and the music he played, she was surprised how he described love between two people and the emotional roller coaster it can sometimes be...and now he was touching something inside her that she never realized. He sounded like he had lived 60 years, instead of the 18 years that he had. With that thought she wiped the tears off her cheeks.

By the time Sam was halfway through the song, he had most of the small crowd mesmerized. Fred had come over to listen and was enthralled with Sam's song about war. Having been a part of the peace movement in San Francisco during Nam, Fred had heard some good anti-war songs. This song was different. It had a patriotic theme wrapped up in the emotions of a young, innocent man whose life had changed so much since he left for boot camp. As he fought for his country, he wondered if God would forgive him.

One verse rang in Fred's ear, along with others.

" _We find excuses to hurt each other,_

And as the jungle rain begins to fall

God's tears hit the earth

His children are fighting again,

That wasn't the plan at all."

Even as they were packing up their stuff a half-hour later, people were talking about Sam's songs. Whenever Jay heard one of those accolades he smiled to himself. That was his buddy.

Meanwhile, Tina had gotten somewhat quiet as she packed up her stuff with Debbie. She didn't really know why. The songs were beautiful. After Sam was done playing, she noticed he graciously handed the guitar back to Fred, and acted as if nothing had happened. He was so nonchalant. No, there was more, she thought. Actually it was because he was humble and shy. That was it.

Throughout the whole day, Sam never did anything to purposely impress her. In fact, if anything he went out of his way to not impress her. She really liked that about him. Most of the guys she dated, especially that piece of doo-doo, Blake, were always trying to show off or brag.

Sam and Jay started to pack up along with everyone else. Jay explained to Tina and Debbie that he and Sam were going to put their boards on the van and then come back to help them carry their stuff.

With a simple smile and wave, Sam went off to load up his van. Tina had spent the better part of the day with him, and she still wasn't ready to go.

The fires were extinguished. The soda tubs were emptied of water and the little ice that was left. Fred had taken his guitar back to the house. Finally, someone turned off the radio and the party unofficially ended.

### Chapter 5

### Getting the Nerve

It would take Sam another week before he asked Tina out. He worked the evening shift on the day after the party, while Tina had the day off. She spent much of the day trying to find an excuse to go into the store, but finally gave up around 8:30 p.m. He was off the next couple of days...to start college.

They wouldn't see each other until Friday night when they both worked together. It was the longest three days Sam had spent in quite a while. Not only was he trying to cope with college, he also couldn't get Tina out of his mind. Like a dummy, he didn't even get her phone number.

Tina on the other hand was at work while those days just crept by. About the only good thing in Tina's mind was not having to go to school. So, she tried to focus on her future at the store and moving into full time work as soon as possible. Unfortunately, she spent most of the time in a haze wondering whether or not Sam wanted to date her. He would undoubtedly come across many girls at school, and she couldn't help feeling that maybe he would find someone else. This tore at her, making the days even longer. When she wasn't feeling jealous of girls that she'd never even seen, she was starting to think about what her life in the future might be like with Sam. What a mess she was. She had to find out soon what Sam was thinking.

Normally, Tina wasn't very complicated and was considered by family and friends to have a very stable personality. She knew what she wanted out of life and in her mind, they were reasonable goals. She did want to travel a little, mainly to Hawaii. She wanted to stay reasonably close to her family roots in Long Beach. Ultimately, she wanted a happy marriage and kids. From her point of view, she was quite content with the life that she had grown up in. To raise a family and continue that lifestyle would be a very happy future.

Late afternoon Friday finally came around. Both of them were anxious to get to work. Tina had started at 4:00 o'clock, an hour earlier than Sam. It was during that hour that Tina confided to Lois.

"We spent the better part of the party together, but nothing was said about...well you know...dating," said Tina. "He didn't even ask for my phone number."

"Maybe he's a little shy. Think about it. He never left your side. I think everyone noticed how close you stayed to each other. Except when he went surfing, were you guys ever apart?"

"Probably not if I think about it. It just kind of felt...natural."

"Listen. I bet I can find out what he's thinking," said Lois. "Besides, I don't think he is the type of guy to lead you on."

"Thanks, Lois. It's driving me crazy."

Smiling at her, Lois said, "Yeah, I can see that. Don't pee in your pants before I find out. He might change his mind."

Sam and Jay both walked in about quarter to five. They had driven in together as they often did when they worked the same shift. Sam had immediately started searching the checkstands for Tina while heading towards the big metal doors that led to the back room of the store. He saw her down at number seven where she was bagging for Lois.

As she looked up, he waved and smiled that little smile that always made Tina feel warm inside. She felt her heart beating harder. Maybe he did care after all.

Somewhere during the first hour Sam ended up bagging for Lois. It didn't take her long for Sam to spill his guts. Within the first two minutes she had found out that he had a wonderful time at the beach party with Tina. She was all he could think about at school this week. Girls he met didn't come close to comparison. As a result, he was already behind in two classes. Lois reasoned that if that's the way he felt he ought to just ask her out. Sam wasn't convinced that it would pay off.

"I don't know, Lois. Every guy in this store likes Tina...except probably Jay who's quite happy seeing Debbie. Who knows how many other guys want to date Tina."

"Sam, don't worry about how many of them want to date her. She spent the whole party with you, didn't she?"

"I guess so."

"She'll go out with you." Then she smiled at him, "Trust me."

"Really?"

"Don't tell her I told you so."

That was all of the encouragement that Sam needed. While on a break together later in the evening, Sam asked Tina if she wanted to go watch a local band at the Huntington Beach Roadhouse tomorrow night after work.

When she said yes, both of them felt a sigh of relief inside.

### Chapter 6

### Meeting the Parents

The market closed at 6:00 p.m. on Saturdays and they were both off work at 6:30 p.m. The Roadhouse opened at 7:30 p.m. serving food up until the band took the stage, which was at 8:30 p.m. Sam followed Tina home so that she could change clothes and drop off her car.

When Tina entered the living room with Sam, her parents were both sitting on the sofa. It appeared that her mom was reading and her father was watching TV, which he turned down upon their entering. Tina quickly made the introductions before heading off to change clothes.

"Mom, Dad, this is Sam Morino. Sam, this is my dad, Jack, and my mom, Darlene."

"Pleased to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Miller."

Sam probably didn't notice the sly little wink and nod that Jack gave his wife after Sam's greeting.

"Well, it's so nice to meet you, too, Sam," smiled Darlene.

"Thanks, Sam. It's a pleasure to meet you as well," said Jack. He loved teasing his daughter. "Tina tells us that you are quite the guitar player and surfer."

"Oh, Dad!" exclaimed Tina as she rounded the corner of the hallway. "I won't be long, Sam."

"How long have you been playing the..."

The sound of her father's voice faded as Tina hurried into her bedroom. She had spent an hour last night going through her closet trying to pick just the right outfit. The week had evolved into a bit of a heat wave and the last thing she wanted to do was perspire during their first date. Even now it was probably still in the high 80's. She wore a pair of hip-hugger Levi's and a light, flowery top. The blouse had an irregular hem line that barely covered her belt, and three-quarter length sleeves that were oversized. It gave her a breezy look and without a bra it would be very cool. She went back and forth about wearing a bra. They weren't going to a drive-in. With the current trend in style she didn't wear one very often, but she didn't want Sam to think she was easy. On the other hand, if he made the move she wouldn't allow him to get that far anyway. So, she chose to be stylish and cool.

It took Tina about 10 minutes to change and freshen up. During that short period, Sam found her mom especially easy to talk to. He knew right away where Tina got her genuineness from. Her father had a wonderful smile and Sam sensed he had a playful side to him. They asked Sam where he lived and what his plans were now that he graduated from high school. Both were pleased that Sam was going to college. They had wished that Tina would go, but were very comfortable with her decision not to go. Darlene and Jack were even more pleased with Sam's politeness.

When Tina appeared again her parents got up to walk her and Sam outside. Before leaving the porch, Sam turned and held his hand out to Jack. "It was a pleasure, sir."

"Goodnight, Sam. It was our pleasure, as well."

Looking at Darlene, Sam smiled. "Goodnight, maam."

"Goodnight, Sam. Thanks for coming in."

Waving goodbye as Sam and Tina got in the van, Darlene turned to Jack, "It's about time Tina brought home someone nice."

"He was certainly different than the previous joker she was dating. This guy actually uses words...with two syllables," he said with a laugh.

With a mischievous grin, Darlene said, "Oh, Jack!"

"Well, I'm right aren't I?"

Chuckling, she gave him a love slap him on the chest, "You certainly are".

### Chapter 7

### The First Date

The roadhouse was across from the Huntington Pier on the corner of Main Street and PCH in an old, brick building. There was a tiny stage wedged into the corner of the square room. Narrow tables stretched out from each side of the stage forming right angles across the club. Chairs were placed only on the one side facing the stage. Red checkered tablecloths were topped with occasional candle jars. The room had the hint of cigarette smoke and beer. In daylight, the room was probably run down and old. Under the candlelight, it was warm and just romantic enough for a first date.

By the time Sam and Tina had arrived the room wasn't too full. So, their seats ended up being pretty good...just off center from stage and a few rows back. They ordered some food ...hot sandwiches and salads, and proceeded to talk as the crowd started filling in. By the time, their meal was served Sam and Tina were deep in conversation trying to hear each other over the noise of the increasing crowd.

The band was unknown to Tina. "Honk" was their name. Sam had heard their music in the surf movie _Five Summer Stories_ , and had always liked it. He found out a week before the beach party that the band was going to play in Huntington and had hoped to see them with Tina. He still couldn't believe it was actually happening. As luck would have it, Tina enjoyed the music. Kind of jazzy, rock 'n roll with a great beat. The saxophone player was extraordinary.

By the time the first half-hour was over, Sam was holding her hand and she was sitting closer to him. About an hour into the show, he leaned over and kissed her lightly on the cheek. Startled...Tina looked into his eyes. A couple of seconds passed. She kissed him on the lips. It took his breath away.

He pulled back from her lips. Looked into her eyes and smiled. Did the music stop? His heartbeat was pounding in his ears. When did the room get so hot? He noticed a trickle of sweat run down the middle of his back. Those azure eyes of hers were sucking him in. And then...embarrassed, Tina looked back towards the band. The trance was broken. He heard the music. Funny, he momentarily forgot where he was.

She loved the way he smiled at her and was still shocked that he had leaned over to kiss her cheek. Kissing him back was like an automatic reaction. She didn't plan it. It just happened as if it was the natural thing to do. And the way he looked at her...deep into her heart. No one had ever done that before.

By the time the show was over it was around 10:30 p.m. Even though the concert was good, the end was kind of anti-climactic. They both knew it was the beginning of the end of their date and neither one of them really wanted to go home.

Driving back up the coast they were a little quiet. It was still warm and they had the windows partially down to let the breeze in off the ocean. The tapestry curtains behind their seats were lightly moving from the wind. As they were passing the Huntington Cliffs Sam asked her if she wanted to watch the moon over the ocean for a while.

He was relieved at the opportunity to prolong the evening when Tina said, "Yes".

She was ecstatic.

Sam backed the van into a parking space on the cliffs. The cliffs were an oddity on this stretch of the coast. They separated Huntington Beach from Bolsa Chica State Beach. Pacific Coast Highway climbed to this slight plateau above the ocean for about a mile or so.

He asked Tina to wait just a second while he jumped out of the driver's side. He walked to the back of the van and opened up the double doors. She heard the doors opening in the back and peered through the curtains that separated the cab from the back of the van. She was a little surprised at what she saw. The floor was carpeted with paneled wood walls. There was a bed in the back up against the double doors. A tapestry had been mounted on the ceiling, and a couple of lantern-type lights hung opposite each other on the walls. It was actually pretty cool looking. His guitar case was on floor next to the bed.

"Why don't you get a couple of cokes in the fridge." he suggested pointing to the little refrigerator behind the driver's seat. "I'll get the beach chairs and set them outside."

Climbing over the engine compartment between the front seats into the back, she opened the little fridge. There was a six-pack of Coke inside. She reached across the bed and held out the two small bottles. "Here you go. Shall I crawl over?"

"It might be easier to go out the side doors."

Sam pulled the beach chairs out from under the bed. He placed them right outside the back of the van. From there they had an unobstructed view of the three-quarter moon deep over the ocean. The wind was very mild and the weather still around seventy-eight degrees. It was a beautiful, balmy night under the stars and Sam wanted to savor every minute.

They talked just loud enough to be heard over the waves washing up on the sand below. The conversation was easy. They spoke of their families, and growing up in their neighborhoods, only 5 miles apart and in different school districts. At some point in the first fifteen minutes their fingers gently intertwined with each other's. They laughed at high school stories, remembered favorite movies, and what they liked about working at the store. They both wanted to see Hawaii - Tina for the scenery and Sam for the surf.

Secretly, they wondered what the future would hold for each of them.

At some point, he gently leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. She turned and her eyes pierced his soul. Sam almost swallowed his tongue he was so excited. Luckily, Tina looked back out to sea and Sam was able to swallow normally again.

"Thanks, Sam, for stopping. It's so beautiful tonight. Look at the moon. It must look spectacular from a boat at sea once you get away from all the city lights."

"Probably," agreed Sam. "I've never been out at night on the ocean."

Sam was gazing out to sea and staring at the distant reflection of the moon on the water. "I remember the first night I spent in the Sierra's. It was a moonless night. God, it was magical. It was so dark except for the stars. I never knew there were that many stars in the sky. It really made me feel small and insignificant in this vast creation."

Tina smiled at him. "It sounds like you believe in God."

Silent for a second. This could be tricky he thought. Sam looked at Tina and then back to the sea. "Absolutely...when I see people laugh together. When I see the wonder in the eyes of a baby. When people do nice things for one another. Especially when I'm outside...listening to the waves or looking at a sunset."

With a sweep of his hand upward to the sky, Sam said "I just don't think this was all a random event and I have trouble believing that there isn't something beyond this life. There is too much wonder in this universe for this life on earth to be so limited. Yeah...I do believe in God, His limitless goodness, and His paradise beyond."

She was caught speechless.

Looking back at Tina, he smiled and asked, "Did I scare you away?"

Blinking, Tina responded. "Not at all. In fact it's refreshing to hear that...I like what you said. Thanks for sharing it."

Just then the light breeze gusted. Sam looked about. "You feel that?"

"What? The wind?"

"Yeah...whenever the wind gusts like that I feel like it's God's breath across my face reminding me of his presence. It's like He's blowing life into the world."

In that instant, a tear welled up inside. She held it back as he turned to look at her. Tina smiled, "That's a beautiful thought. I'll remember it always."

Thinking to herself, she was so surprised to hear this kind of conversation from a guy. Was he for real? Not everyone she had dated was shallow, but none of them had ever openly discussed their views on God. She was not only amazed, but also moved that he felt the way he did.

Tina had never brought up the discussion of God before with any guy. She knew that if she ever got serious with someone the discussion would have to come up. She decided long ago that she was going to be very comfortable about religion and beliefs before getting married. But here it came up on their first date, so easily and naturally that it was no big deal.

"What about you?" he asked.

"Well, my parents raised me Lutheran and it stuck. I used to go to church often when I was kid. I don't go as often anymore, but I still have a strong belief in Christ. I find myself thanking him during the day sometimes for some little thing that may have happened. I hope to go to church with my own family one day."

He smiled and nodded back, agreeing with her.

"Sam, I noticed you brought your guitar with you. Were you going to play it tonight?"

"You know it's often in there. I go down to the lifeguard stations at night in Belmont Shore and play a few nights a week." Sam hadn't really planned on playing tonight especially after seeing a professional band. "You really want to hear me fumble around with it after you just heard a good band?"

"You don't fumble, and yes. I would like to hear you play again. I really enjoyed it when you played at the beach party."

"Okay, but you asked for it." He was kind of excited to play for her again. He loved playing the guitar at night on the beach. It brought a lot of peace to him. Probably, because he felt that the only one who heard him was God.

He didn't play very many Beatle songs, primarily because he couldn't pull off some of the complicated chord arrangements and also because he just didn't do the songs justice, in his mind. But one of the ones he did play often was, _Let it B_ e. He started with that one. He played an old Rick Nelson favorite... _You Are the Only One_ , _Wooden Ships_ from Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young, _Rocky Mountain High_ by John Denver, and _Nights In White Satin_ by the Moody Blues.

"Play one of yours...from the beach party?" she asked softly. "The love song."

She had been watching him intently. He had a good voice, but the way he delivered the words was amazing. She had heard the songs all before, but never like he sang them. And then he started singing the love song she requested.

After the first verse, she was gazing out to sea with watery eyes. Where did this guy come from? As soon as he finished the song, he started right into another one. He was so sensitive and said so much in the words he sang.

" _When will I hold her?_

When will she be mine?

I don't even know her.

Will it ever be time?"

As he sang about someone looking for love, tired of all the empty romances he had before, it amazed her that Sam could sing as though he had lived years beyond his age.

" _Broken promises, and_

Nothing left behind,

Just an empty heart,

Will it ever be time?"

She had spent basically two days with him...not even that. Well, more if you included the smaller social gatherings with the store crowd. That's all it took, she was falling in love him.

Glancing at her watch it was about 11:45 p.m. "I don't really want to, but I think we'd better get home. It's a quarter to twelve."

"Wow. Where did the time go? Come on, let's get going. I don't want your parents to be upset with me on the first date."

So, he put his guitar away and she helped put the chairs back under the bed. As she did, she couldn't help thinking about whether they would ever make out on that bed. She also wondered, for a moment, how many other girls may have been on that bed. It made her jealous.

Up until then, Sam had only kissed her quickly...and lightly. Enough to show he cared. Here they were. Alone. Together on a beautiful night overlooking the ocean. She looked so desirable and sexy in those tight jeans and light, loose blouse. Tina got several glances from other guys at the concert. His emotions were overwhelming.

Reaching out, he pulled her close to him. He didn't kiss her at once. He just took in everything about her. He felt her breasts against his chest. Her back on his fingertips. Her hair hanging loosely over her eyes and down over her shoulders. Her sweet scent. The warm, gentle smile. And always...those azure eyes.

Was he crazy? He thought her eyes said, "I'm yours now."

He kissed her deep and long.

Any other time he probably would have tried coaxing a date into the van and shutting the doors. Not this time. Tina stirred feelings in him that he had never felt before. Yeah, she was incredibly pretty, but there was something so natural and down to earth about her that made him feel...like he had always belonged with her.

He felt very empty when he said goodnight at her door.

### Chapter 8

### College Begins

The first semester of college was a real eye opener for Sam. He spent four days a week in class from morning until late afternoon. The lecture halls were hot and stifling in the fall. He thought that by the time December rolled around they would be more comfortable. But, he would discover that the heating system was out of whack and the rooms were even more unbearable. It the heat was on, the rooms were stuffy and hot. If the heating wasn't working, they were like large cement freezers.

The rooms held about two hundred students or more. If that wasn't bad enough, the teachers were usually boring and spoke in monotone. He often wondered about the few kids who walked into class, turned on a tape recorder just before the lecture started, and then left the classroom. How much of the lecture was actually understandable on those tapes? Did they get more out of the lecture than he did being there live?

He worked primarily weekends...Friday evenings, and Saturday and Sunday afternoons. The rest of the weeknights he spent studying. Occasionally, he would work one night a week just to see Tina before the weekend. When he did work during the week, it was often met with slight displeasure from his mom or dad. Sam explained that he needed to work occasionally during the week to stay in good graces with his boss. His parents nodded back really knowing it was to see Tina...but they didn't make a big deal about it because they both genuinely liked her and Sam's grades were still holding up.

Luckily, he had no school on Fridays and Sam was generally heading for work by 2:30 p.m. Even though he would call Tina nightly, it wasn't enough. Seeing her put him on top of the world. The time they did spend together was magical for Sam.

He had a couple of girlfriends in high school. While they were both sweet and cute, he now realized just how young they really were. Sure, they were the same age as he was. But, until meeting Tina, he never understood how shallow they were...or him for that matter. Tina made him think bigger and beyond high school. She knew high school was just a brief moment in her life. After graduation, her life was really beginning. All of sudden Sam was starting to look forward as well.

After their first date they had no interest in seeing other people. Within a month, the word "love" slipped into their conversation very easy. They quickly became the focus of each other's future.

Because of Sam's school and work schedule, they didn't really have many formal dates. They would go to the movies every couple of weeks after work on Saturday, or just go to have a bite to eat at a local coffee shop that they gotten into the habit of frequenting because it had great pie and coffee. If the weather was decent, they would go to the lifeguard stands, and Sam would play his guitar. Much of the time they found themselves at Tina's house watching TV in the family room in the back of the house.

Often, Jay and Debbie would join them for coffee or a movie. Jay and Debbie had turned into the best of friends. It was questionable whether true romance would blossom. They went out a lot together when neither one of them had a date. Sometimes even when one of them had an opportunity for a date, they would avoid it just to spend time with one another.

By the time Thanksgiving rolled around Sam and Tina had a hand in each of their families' plans for dinner. It was their first big holiday together and neither one of them wanted to spend it away from each other. It took a little convincing, but they got their mothers to agree to separate their meals by four hours. It was either that or one of the families was going to be without one of the kids. Neither wanted that. One of the things that both Tina and Sam had in common were family get-togethers for the holidays. At eighteen it was a very big deal to show off your new sweetheart and Sam and Tina were no different.

It was a very special time for them for a couple of reasons. They spent the early afternoon meal at Tina's family dinner and the evening at Sam's. They met each other's aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, and special friends. They shared laughs, family stories, played games, and had two very good meals. And that evening...they made love for the first time.

It wasn't planned. It just happened. They had said their goodbyes from Sam's family around nine o'clock. When they both got into the van, they hugged and said thanks for a great day.

They looked into each other's eyes smiling and finally Sam said, "I really love you, Tina."

"Then...let's not go to my house right away."

Grinning back at her, he said, "What do you have in mind?"

"Let's go park for a while."

"We can do that", Sam said matter of factly with a smile.

Well, they had done that often enough. The great thing about Sam's van...it was like a private room. It didn't have any side windows and the back ones were covered with some opaque, colored plastic. When the curtains were drawn up front, you couldn't see in from the front either. Even with the two dim lanterns Sam had installed in the back it was totally dark from the outside. Sam and Tina had often parked on some neighborhood street between their respective parts of town, held each other tight, and made out in the back.

That night they drove partially back to Tina's house and parked in a quiet neighborhood near a park. Slipping into the back after her, Sam closed the curtains. The November night was cooler than it had been recently so they pulled the quilt up over themselves as they lay down. The gentle kisses were exchanged with words of love and eyes promising life together always. Slowly the kisses became deeper.

It was a beautiful thing that happened that night between them. They weren't two kids just doing the nasty in the back seat of a car at some drive-in. Sam and Tina had been almost inseparable for three months. They truly cared about each other's feelings and were good friends. Even at that young age, there was no mistake that they were in love. That night they simply locked away the outside world in their own private space. They lay naked in each other's arms and made love. It felt natural and comfortable. They shared no remorse, but rather elation. There was no shame, but promises to love each other always.

From then on, Thanksgiving would always be something special for them. Even though they were only eighteen, they suddenly had a purpose and direction in life. It was each other...pure and simple.

Saying goodnight to her was heart wrenching for Sam. The last thing he wanted to do that night was to let Tina go from his arms. But it was late and there was tomorrow. So, with a gentle touch of his hand to her face, he looked into her azure eyes and said, "Tonight was the best night of my life, Tina...Goodnight."

She squeezed him tight and said, "Mine, too. I love you, Sam."

With that he turned slowly away and walked down the driveway to his car. It was going to be hard for him to fall asleep that night.

He had four more weeks of school before Christmas break. The last two were semester finals. Since Thanksgiving, Sam had found it difficult to concentrate on school. When he wasn't studying, he was thinking of Tina. Luckily, he had always been good at cramming for tests. So, he pulled off three A's and two B's for his first college finals. He celebrated by going shopping for Tina's Christmas presents.

Sam had never really liked shopping, unless it was for a surfboard. He had bought presents for girlfriends before. It was never easy, and he usually settled for some stupid thing. This time it was very easy. The saleslady was quite nice. She was probably in her early thirties, recognized that Sam was in love, and also young and on a budget. Within the hour he had left with exactly what he was looking for. It wasn't a large diamond, but it was an attractive setting and after all...it was from his heart.

### Chapter 9

### Christmas Eve

Tina and her parents arrived at Sam's parents' house about 7:00 p.m. The whole neighborhood was gaily lit with Christmas lights, but Sam's house must have really been burning electricity. When Tina first saw the house lit up a couple of weeks before, she was amazed. Sam had told her that his dad loved to decorate for Christmas. Every year there was an additional reindeer, wise man, or something on the front lawn...make that snow. Somehow, Ben had created "hilly snowfields" on the front lawn. The walkway up to the front door divided the "snowfields" into two scenes. The left side was the first Christmas complete with a stable, Joseph and Mary, the baby Jesus in a manger, an Angel above the shepherds and their flocks of sheep. The right side of the walkway was Santa's workshop at the North Pole complete with Santa, elves, his sleigh, and reindeer.

There wasn't any parking within 5 houses because of the crowd at Sam's. As they walked between the two lavish scenes in the front yard, Tina and her parents could hear music, and the low roar of laughter and conversation. Jack and Darlene were tongue-tied at the decorations on the lawn.

"I've never seen anything like this!" said Jack over and over.

A Christmas tree was illuminated in the large picture window in the front of the house. On the front door was a sign that read, "New carpet...please remove your shoes."

Sam's mom had invited Tina's parents a few weeks back. Now that Tina and Sam had been dating quite steadily for months, Maryann and Darlene had been getting pretty friendly and occasionally having lunch. Tina's family gathering wasn't until Christmas Day, but it wasn't anything near the size of this party. At Maryann's urging, Darlene and Jack agreed to come.

Christmas Eve had always been a big affair at Sam's house. Between friends and family, the house was bulging with almost 80 people. As they entered the house, there were some chuckles as Maryann pointed to the large arrangement of shoes to the side of the entry. It looked like a shoe sale.

Speaking loudly over the noise with her hands up to her mouth, Maryann smiled, "I'm so sorry about this...early Christmas present. Ben didn't have the heart to have all of these shoes on our new carpet."

Waving her hand in dismissal, "Not a problem", said Darlene. "I'd do the same thing."

The home was festive. Maryann had Christmas decorations everywhere. The tree was lovely. The house smelled like a restaurant...a good one. There was a buffet of hors d'oeuvres on the dining room table. But something else delicious was permeating the air.

"Excuse me, Maryann. What is that wonderful aroma? It's driving me crazy," said Jack.

"Oh, Gio is cooking up a storm in the kitchen."

"That's Sam's grandpa, Dad," said Tina as she kissed him on the cheek. "I'm going to find Sam."

Introductions were made throughout the house as Maryann guided Tina's parents around while Tina went in search of Sam.

Tina came across Sam in the kitchen. There, among a small crowd of women, was Sam's grandpa Gio evidently cooking up a storm and extolling his secrets to his admirers. There was a large pot on both of the back burners...one for boiling the pasta and the other had two gallons of sauce simmering. The large cast iron skillet in the front was currently empty.

Tina had met grandpa Gio at Thanksgiving. He was Ben's dad and what a charmer. She listened to his innumerable stories all day and never got tired. She discovered that day that everyone in the family called grandpa...Gio.

Gio had left Varazze, Italy, to go to America in 1918 along with his cousin, Angelo, when he was 19 years old. His dad had gone off to war and hadn't been heard from for a couple of years. Because his mother had died a few years before, Gio's two sisters had gone to live with his father's sister in Serra, a mountain village an hour west of Florence. Knowing no English, Gio and Angelo, sailed to New York and entered Ellis Island on a cold, rainy November morning.

Tina could only imagine what grandpa Gio had been like as a young man. Even now at seventy-four, he was captivating. He wasn't a big man...about 5'6". But he had a big smile and hearty laugh, his mouth framed by a meticulously kept goatee speckled with gray. He had thick wavy, dark brown hair and piercing dark, blue eyes. He lit up the room with his smile and charisma. If he sung, "oh my!" He only had to hit three notes and the room would go silent. He had sung at Thanksgiving. She was hoping he would sing tonight for her parents to hear.

Catching his eye, he stretched out his hands, "Tina, come here and give me a hug and let me introduce you to my nieces. Then, I'll show all of you pretty, young things how to make wonderful peppers and sausages, and my secret ravioli."

Sam tapped him on the shoulder and smiled, "Gio, can I hug my girlfriend, too?"

"Maybe. I'm sure you get to do it enough. Me...I have to get all I can at my age," said Gio with a big laugh. "But before I let her go, she has to promise me something." Raising an eyebrow along with a devilish grin, "Tina, could you get Gio a glass of my wine from the bar." Spreading his hands, "Keeping all of these beauties entertained over this hot stove has left me parched."

"Come on, Tina, let me take you to see if we can find a jug for grandpa Gio."

"No, no...not a jug, just a big glass," laughed Gio as he turned his attention back to his crowd of women. "Now ladies, the secret to my ravioli is the stuffing."

The "bar" was in the family room, which was off of the kitchen at the rear of the house. As Sam guided Tina there, he paused off to the side of the room. Holding her close, Sam whispered into her ear, "I love you, babe. Thank you for being in my life". Then, he kissed her on the cheek.

Her eyes were sparkling, alive when she looked into his. Tina replied, "Oh, Sam, I'm so happy to be here with you. Our families celebrating Christmas. I hope we can always do this."

"We will."

Sam sounded so sure of their future.

The bar was located at one end of a large family room. Sam's dad was playing bartender to a lively crowd. There was an ice chest on each side of him...one full of beer and the other with soda. Ben was pouring wine or liquor for the people lined up two deep at the counter.

Leaning in from the side of the bar, Sam said to his father, "Gio wants his special."

Ben smiled at Sam, "A big glass of his red."

As he said this, he looked over Sam's shoulder across the room to the kitchen. Over all the heads and through the crowd in the kitchen, Ben spotted his father. Where did he get the energy? He just didn't slow down...ever. In a flash, Gio gazed over towards the bar as if he felt the eyes upon him. He motioned with two hands spreading apart and mouthing the words, "a big one".

Ben nodded back and waved his hand in agreement over his head. Sam chuckled, saying to his dad, "He loves life. Doesn't he, dad?"

"God bless him. We should all be so intoxicated with it." Ben grabbed a plain looking bottle from the back shelf amongst the other liquor bottles. Pulling the cork out of the bottle he filled a short, narrow water glass with red wine.

Once he settled in America, Gio always had some grape vines wherever he lived. He continued his own father's custom of making wine for the home. It wasn't true Chianti, but Gio blended Sangiovese and Cabernet grapes into a respectable drinking wine.

Ben looked at Tina, "Hi, Tina. You look pretty. Can I get you a soda?"

"Hi, Mr. Morino...a coke would be great."

"Now, Tina...how long have you been dating Sam? Months now, and I see you every week. Don't you think it's time to start calling me Ben? What do you say?"

"Merry Christmas, Ben. Thanks."

"Thanks for what. You're a sweet girl and you make my son happy. What else could I want from you? Here's your Coke. You two better get that wine to Gio. He looks desperate," raising his eyebrows and nodding back towards the kitchen.

Tina and Sam looked over to the kitchen where Gio was looking back at them. He was rubbing his throat and hanging out his tongue as if he was parched.

Sam looked back at his dad grinning.

"What are you going to? He's in his element," said Ben.

As they started walking back to the kitchen, Tina asked Sam, "You know, I'm curious. I always notice that Gio doesn't drink his wine from a wine glass. Why is that?"

"As long as I can remember, Gio has always drunk his red out of these small glasses. According to him, it's a family custom. He'll drink white wine or champagne out of wine glasses, but not his red wine."

"Finally!" said Gio as Sam handed him the glass. "I thought I was going to pass out from thirst." He lightly touched a couple of the girls on the cheek with open fingers. "But, that wouldn't be too bad because then one of these lovelies would have to give me mouth to mouth resuscitation," he said with a devilish laugh as the girls around him giggled.

"Now, ladies, I've shown you how to stuff the ravioli. Here's how you finish a sauce for the ages." With a grin, he continues, "Once you learn this, you'll have any decent man eating out of the palm of your hand. But, first, a bit of the grape." He took a good sized drink and swished the wine around his mouth, and let it run down the inside of his cheek before swallowing. "Ah, now we're ready to proceed."

Leaning over to Tina, Sam says, "I'll be back. I'm going to say hi to your parents."

Patting Gio on the shoulder, Tina said with a smile, "I think I'll stick around and watch Gio finish the sauce so I can have you eating out of the palm of my hand. Give me a kiss before you go."

As Sam leaned over to kiss Tina, Gio said with a sly laugh, "Hurry up and kiss her, so I can have her to myself."

Sam looked at Gio with a grin and shook his head. The man was so full of life, and loved the simple things – his homemade wines, good food, women, and music...especially Sinatra. It was hard to resist his grandpa...everyone found it hard.

Winking at Tina, Sam said, "You don't need his sauce to have me eating out of your hand. That happened as soon as you looked at me with those blue eyes."

It was hard to believe, but the party actually got louder over the next hour. It was impossible to carry on a conversation in a normal voice. The louder people spoke to be heard, the louder it got. The house was packed with the arrival of more people. Everyone was feasting on the buffet. Maryann had laid out l'insalati, Fruiti de mare, and fresca pane. The liquor and wine was flowing. Gio finally served his ravioli with sausages and peppers to a resounding success. Jack finally had a chance to taste what was driving him nuts all evening. It was unbelievably delicious.

"Gio, this is the best ravioli I've ever had."

"Try it with some of this and it's even better", as Gio handed him his glass of red with a big smile.

Christmas carols were playing on one stereo in the living room, but they were barely audible. There was no music needed at the back of the house since most of the crowd was there and would have never heard it. People spilled out of the patio doors to the outside. Luckily, it was in the high 50's and not too cold, but just to be sure Ben had fires going in two small chimaeras. Along with the colored lanterns hanging from the patio roof it was a warm setting to get some fresh air.

Jack and Darlene had been to some pretty good neighborhood parties in their day, but none of them was anything like this. Neither one of their families was that large, and their siblings were scattered all over the country. For them, a family gathering was maybe fifteen people at best. As near as they could make out, they had met about seven or eight couples of aunts and uncles of Sam's plus innumerable cousins. They seemed to remember that Sam's father, Ben, had most of his siblings there. Maryann had two sisters and their husbands in town, as well. After a couple of manhattans it was hard to keep their names all straight. It was easier to just get pulled into the revelry. Both of them were thinking, "what a delightful family Sam had", and were glad Tina had found him.

By 9:30 the party was in high gear and showed no signs of letting up. It wasn't long before Ben's brother, Lowry, handed the mandolin to him.

"Only if Gio sings. It wouldn't be Christmas without him singing," said Ben.

Lowry, short for Lorenzo, found Gio in the living room telling the story of his arrival in New York from Italy to Tina's parents. "Excuse me, Jack and Darlene. We have a treat for you. Papa, come with me. Ben has the 'mandolino' and we want you to sing."

Darlene got excited. She remembered Tina telling her about Sam's grandpa singing at Thanksgiving. Tina went on and on about his voice. "Oh, I'd love to hear you sing." She looked at Jack, "Remember Tina telling us that Gio used to own a restaurant where all of the waiters sang."

"That's right!" He was happy that she remembered. "Oh, that was a wonderful time in my life. My lovely wife and I built that business from nothing. Come. Let me sing for you now." He tapped her on the arm and motioned them to the back of the house.

The back corner of the family room was the music corner. Ben and Maryann were both musical, which is where Sam got his talent for playing the guitar. Unlike Sam, they were both comfortable playing in front of people. Ben's mother, Victoria, had taught him to play the 'mandolino' when he was young. It was a family heirloom from Italy. Maryann learned how to play the piano as a young girl. Gio bought the baby grand for her as a Christmas present five years ago.

As Gio made his way into the room, the family started the applause. The neighbors and friends quickly followed suit.

"Thank you, thank you." He turned around to face the party. "Our family knows this, as do our dear friends that join us every year. For those of you joining us for the first time this Christmas...I usually sing a few songs before we all sing Christmas carols together."

This was when it was always tough for him. He missed Victoria so much during the holidays. She started these parties so many years ago and now their family had grown...become beautiful, loving people...with families of their own. After 47 years of marriage, being a partner in business, and his best friend, life was never quite the same without her. He was the loud one. She was the silent rock. He secretly bought the piano to remember how much Victoria loved his music. He raised his ever-present glass of wine, "To you, Victoria." Looking toward Ben, he said, "You know the one."

Ben started playing the introduction to _Ritorna Me_ here. It was Victoria's favorite song and Gio still sung it often to keep her spirit alive. As good as Ben was on the mandolin, Gio's voice was the focal point. Even though the words were in Italian, the feelings poured from his heart and out of his mouth into the room.

_Ritorna me,_

non la sciare mi solo,

Vieni tu, vieni tu, vieni tu

mio amore.

Ritorna me

cara mia ti amo

solo tu, solo tu, solo tu

mio amore

People were captivated. Ben's mandolin and Gio's baritone in Italian were magic.

Return to me,

Please come back, bella mia

Hurry back, hurry home

To my arms, to lips, and my heart.

As he neared the end, a solitary tear ran down his cheek...and down several others in the room. The applause was enormous.

Jack and Darlene had been standing next to Tina and Sam. As Gio finished, Darlene grabbed Tina's arm. "That was beautiful. Jack do you have a Kleenex?" Sniffling, she looked at Tina. "Was Victoria his wife?"

"Yes, she died about five or six years ago. They started the restaurant together and ran it for years." Turning to Sam. "When did your grandparents open their restaurant?"

"I want to say the mid-twenties. They sold it in 1960, I think."

The applause was still loud. Then the chanting started. "Opera. Opera."

Gio was waving his hand in the air. "Okay, okay." Turning to Maryann, he motioned to the piano and said, "Maryann, if you please." She sat down at the black, baby grand. He leaned over to her and said something that went unheard to the crowd. Maryann played the intro from _Cavaleria d'Rusticana_. It took about five or six notes from Gio's mouth before everyone's mouth opened with amazement. The love song was wonderful, but his opera was powerful. By the time he had finished, all of the guests were trying to squeeze into the back of the house to hear him and get a closer look. Once again the applause was loud.

"Bravo...Bravo."

Again silencing the crowd by waving his hands, he softly said, "All right. One more before we all sing carols. After all...this is our Lord's night. Now, most of you know I love Sinatra. So, here it goes." He leaned over to whisper again to Maryann. With that, she started playing "All of Me".

He was really in his element now. He enjoyed singing the old, Italian songs...especially with the 'mandolino'. The opera was always a hit because so few people could sing it. But, he loved swinging, and Sinatra was the king...and Gio let it rip.

As usual, Gio bowed kindly to the applause and then quieted the crowd.

Victoria had always insisted that everyone in her house sing Christmas Carols to celebrate the Christ child's birthday. As the parties progressed over the years, the returning guests and family always looked forward to the caroling. They usually sang about four of them. Ben switched to the guitar borrowed from Sam. He started with his favorite _Silent Night,_ which was originally written for the guitar. Every voice in the room no matter how good...or bad sang along.

Christ, our Savior, is born.

* * *

Darlene and Jack finally said their good-byes to Sam's family around 11:00 p.m. after dessert. They had met so many nice people and really enjoyed getting to know Sam's family. Jack and Ben had shared their mutual love of baseball over drinks on the patio...both bellyaching about the Angels. Darlene and Maryann fussed a little over the mess in the kitchen while discussing the "kids". They sensed how close Tina and Sam had gotten. Yes, there was a concern because after all they were only 18 years old. On the other hand, both were pretty well grounded and not prone to make stupid decisions.

Once the coffee was brewed and set out for the guests, they brought cups and German chocolate cake and homemade cannoli out to the patio where their husbands had planted themselves. By now, three-quarters of the guests had gone home to await Santa. Most of the people left were family. Over dessert Jack and Darlene thanked Ben and Maryann for insisting that they come. They couldn't remember when they had had such a nice time. Everyone had been so welcoming.

"And I can't tell you when I had so much good food!" exclaimed Jack as he was devouring one of Maryann's cannoli.

"Oh, Jack" said Darlene with a smile, slapping him lightly on the shoulder. "I especially loved hearing Gio sing. What an amazing voice!"

With a mouth full of cream cheese and light pastry, Ben nodded in agreement. Swallowing he said, "That's my papa. He's quite special."

Sam and Tina walked her parents to their car. Sam was going to take her home in a bit once the house was empty and they helped clean up a little.

"Watch out for drunks on the road, Sam," said Jack as he got into the passenger seat. Most of them aren't as smart as I am allowing their wonderful wife to drive home tonight. "Isn't that right, darling?" he smiled at Darlene plopping himself into the seat.

"That's right, Jack," she said as she walked around the car. Speaking softly to Tina and Sam, "I wouldn't get in the car with him unless he did let me drive. Goodnight, kids. Don't be too late. We have to do this all over again tomorrow afternoon...only not on such a grand scale. Sam, we had a lovely time."

By now the fog had started moving up the block from the ocean. It was getting chillier. Amazingly, the fog hadn't been very prominent this December. Sam could remember many Christmas' when you couldn't see the car parked in front of the house.

Over the last four hours their families had gotten to spend quality time together for the first time. There had been some anxiety leading up to the party, but Sam and Tina's fears had been all for naught. The Christmas party was a perfect place to get them all together. A little into the party, both Sam and Tina knew that everything was going great.

So, as the evening went by, Sam and Tina became more relaxed and enjoyed the festivities. Sam introduced Tina to his aunts and uncles, cousins, friends, and neighbors. He was extremely proud and loved showing her off. She looked incredibly pretty to him, but...he was in love. Her blond hair was piled loosely on top of her head with a bit of bangs hanging loose. He had always loved that look. To him it was incredibly sexy. She wore a long, form-fitting halter dress with a keyhole neck that exposed a bit of her cleavage. The dress was a shade of blue that exaggerated her azure eyes.

It was all he could do to think about anything other than making love to her that night. Luckily, there was something else to occupy his mind. The velvet box in his pocket kept reminding him all night.

He had thought about proposing earlier in the day, and celebrating that night with everyone. After giving it one of many other considerations, he thought that he would wait until the party was under way, or over. By then he would know how the parents would interact. If it went badly, he would really be in a pickle because the ring was his only gift.

The evening could not have gone any better so Sam decided to propose on the way home. After the cursory cleaning was complete, Sam and Tina said their "goodnights" to the remaining family. He told his parents he'd be home later as they would probably stay up at Tina's house for a bit.

Sam hadn't been this nervous around Tina since the Labor Day beach party. She picked up on his awkwardness in the van soon after they left the house.

She looked at him with a questioning smile, "What's wrong? You look peculiar. Are you okay?"

Nervous as hell, he took a deep breath, "Would you mind if we didn't go to your house right away?"

Looking back at him with slight grin she leaned over and rubbed his upper thigh, "This dress got to you, huh? No, I wouldn't mind at all. I wanted to grab you all night."

That broke the ice quick enough. Even though he did want to get that dress off as quickly as possible, it came second in importance right then. "Well, as a matter of fact I did feel like ripping that dress off of you. You look great!"

"Do you? I like that. Okay...where do we go?"

"Let's go down to the water. We won't be able to see, but we'll still hear the waves."

It was a quick couple of blocks to the beach. Sam parked along a street perpendicular to Ocean Blvd. just above the beach. Would he find the right words? What was she going to think? They'd only been dating four months. They had hinted and talked about a future together, but never really mentioned marriage. If she said no, it was likely Christmas would be ruined for both of them. Screw it, he was going to take the gamble.

"I've practiced this a lot and every time it sounded stupid."

"What are you talking about?" Tina was really curious now. She really didn't think anything was wrong between them, but he was acting awfully weird. "Spit it out."

He fumbled getting the box out of his pocket. Setting it on the engine compartment between their seats, he said, "It wasn't until I met you that I started thinking about marriage. I listened to your dreams of a happy life. A good husband. Wonderful kids. The more time I spent with you, the more it became clear."

She couldn't believe this was happening...at least now. She had hoped it would come one day soon. Tina had never been happier with another guy and she knew Sam was all she would ever want. Both of her hands went to her mouth, "Oh my, God!" Her eyes started welling up. The tears weren't flowing yet.

He continued with a lump in his throat. "I know we haven't known each other that long, but in my heart I know you'll be the only one that I'll want to see first thing in the morning and the last thing at night. I'll try to make you happy every day. Will you marry me?"

She still had her hands up to her mouth. The tears started to flow as she shook her head yes. The words tried to come out, but it was a struggle. Finally, with a gasp she leaned across and draped her arms around his neck and whispered into his ear, "Yes, I will marry you, Sam."

Boy, was that a relief for Sam. The lump in his throat disappeared, but was replaced with his heart pounding. He softly said into her ear, "Would you like to see your ring?"

Pulling back a bit, she nodded with a smile. She wiped her tears with the fingers from both of her hands.

Opening the box went a lot smoother for Sam than taking it out of his pocket, but his hands still trembled even though the hard part was over. Holding up the box exposing the ring for her approval, "If you don't like it, we can exchange it for one that you like."

She gently took the box and looked at the ring...yellow gold...two small stones on each side of a larger stone. She smiled. "Would you put it on", she said handing it back to Sam. "It's perfect, and I'll never take it off."

They couldn't take each other's clothes off any faster. Even with the cool temperature outside, the combination of their passion and the heavy comforter kept things pretty toasty inside the van. They stayed longer than normal when they parked. That was understandable.

She rode on the engine compartment all the way home with her head on his shoulder and arm around his neck. Unfortunately, for both of them, the drive went too quickly. They lingered at the back door to her house for five minutes...mostly just holding each other.

Finally, Sam said, "Are you going to tell your parents with or without me here?"

Tina took a deep breath, "You know I was wondering about that? I don't really know how they're going to take it. My parents think you're a "wonderful boy", as my mom would say. My dad thinks you're pretty special too. I guess the only bad part would be our age and how long we've been seeing each other. What do you think?"

"Well, I'm a bit nervous about telling my parents, but screw it...I'm also very excited and would hope that they'd all be happy for us, too."

"Let's tell my parents together, while everyone is opening presents. Then, we'll swing by later and tell your mom and dad."

"Okay, that works for me. Well...I better go", Sam said finally.

"I wish you could stay with me", she said squeezing his hand.

"Me, too." Winking at her, "One day, I won't have to leave."

"I can't wait."

"Me, neither." He kissed her long and soft. "Good night, love."

"Good night, Sam. Drive safe. You're my future now."

"Hey, I like the sound of that."

"So do I."

### Chapter 10

### Christmas Day 1973

Surprisingly, Tina's parents were happy with the announcement. Darlene started to cry while hugging Tina, which made Tina start to cry. Jack simply walked over to Sam, held out his right hand while putting his left hand on Sam's shoulder, "I'm glad to have you in the family, son. I can see you'll take good care of my little girl."

"I'll do my very best, sir. I love her very much."

"I know that", Jack said with a smile. "And that's why I'm happy." Turning to Darlene. "Now Darlene, let Tina go so I can have a hug. Here you can have Sam", he said with a chuckle as he waved a hand towards Sam.

Once releasing Sam, Darlene asked, "Do your parents know, yet?"

"We thought that we would tell you first", said Tina.

With a dry, sarcastic tone and a smile, Sam said, "In case you didn't approve, we wouldn't have to do two of these announcements."

There were chuckles around the room from Tina's grandparents, her sister and boyfriend.

Jack looked at Darlene and saw her happy approval. "Well, we approve..." And with a serious look at Sam, "on one condition..." His last word hung in the air for what seemed like minutes. Then his smile brightened up the room, "Well...did you get her a ring?"

"Oh, yes!" said Tina excitedly. "Sam gave it to me last night. It's in my room", as Tina went racing to her room. She quickly returned waiving her left hand in front of everyone to show off her diamond.

In spite of Sam and Tina's fretting, it really turned out to be a special Christmas...so far anyway.

Sam's parents took the news about the same, albeit with some unspoken caution due to their ages. Maryann's reaction was almost a copy of Darlene's. Ben was a bit more reserved, but still happy. He welcomed Tina into the family. He would save a little man to man talk for later that day when he and Sam had some time alone. Ben had nothing against Tina. In fact, he understood why Sam was so nuts about her. She was warm and bubbly...smart and sincere...not to mention very pretty. She reminded him of Goldie Hawn, which he always had a soft spot. Ben felt it was his duty to at least mention their young ages and not to rush into anything. He wasn't going to make a big deal about it. In the end, Ben trusted in his son's decision making.

Gio on the other hand was ecstatic, which didn't help Ben's reserve. Gio liked Tina since the first time he met her. He found her charming. He quickly reminded Ben that he married his mother, Victoria, when he was twenty and she was eighteen. Also, that Ben married Maryann when she was eighteen.

When Ben countered with, "But that was wartime", it didn't deter Gio.

"Be happy that Sam found someone so nice. He could do a lot worse", Gio finally said.

Ben relented. After all he didn't want to make a big deal about it to begin with.

### Chapter 11

### Back to 1994

The sun was well up over the horizon now and warming the back deck of Sam's house. The pink and orange tint in the sky gave way to a pale blue.

Why did all those memories of Tina come rushing back so easy? It was as if it was yesterday.

Sam took a sip of his coffee. It had gotten cold. Time for a refill. Opening the wood framed glass door that entered the kitchen, he headed for the coffee pot. He'd put off going into work today. There wasn't anything pressing going on.

He walked to the window and looked out again into the distance. He'd come a long way and experienced a lot of life since he left Tina, much of it fulfilling...some a waste. In most circles, he'd be considered successful. Years ago that was a very important goal. In recent years it wasn't. He had seen much of the country, lived in some beautiful places, built nice homes, and bought and sold his share of toys. The last few years became a time of contemplation. None of it really made him happy. Comfortable? Yes. But, he remained lonely...maybe empty was a better word.

Since he split from the dragon lady 10 years ago, Sam was leery of getting involved again. That mistake taught him a permanent lesson. You don't go away for a vacation in the Caribbean, spend it partying, and come home with someone you barely knew except when they were out of their bikini. Blaming it on youth gave him some solace.

But here he was again, involved with another woman, a different kind of woman. Lynda had been wonderful companionship since arriving in Durango. You couldn't call them an item, but they saw each other a fair amount. The rumor mill hadn't started, yet.

Easy going and peaceful were the two things that came to Sam's mind when describing Lynda. Sometimes conversation came easy. Other times, there was none...just comfort.

On those days when work got a bit stressful or very busy, he always found some reason to drop by to see if she wanted company. After being in her space for just 15 minutes, the world had a gentler tone to it. She stirred feelings in him that he hadn't had in so many years. He actually was considering fatherhood every now then, as painful as it was sometimes to think about. But, maybe Lynda was just the thing to slay the demons. How would he feel being the father at a high school graduation at 60? He didn't know. She never pressed him on it. It was just like her. She was the most satisfying relationship he had known in many, many years.

The ringing phone startled him.

"Hello....Oh, good morning, Lynda. I was just thinking of you. Yeah, it was good."

### Chapter 12

Meeting Lynda

Sam had only been in Killington, Vermont a little over three years when the call came from Allen Collins wanting him to come manage his resort in Durango, Colorado. Sam had enjoyed living in Vermont. In so many ways, it was a world away from the rest of America. He loved the old colonial towns, the quaint shops run by 3rd generation shopkeepers, the sugar shacks that sold the maple syrup products, and the beautiful fall foliage.

He knew that eventually he'd make his way back west. That's where his roots were and he was a 'westerner' at heart. He loved the big open expanses that only the West could provide. Sam had been to Durango often enough in the past to know he'd be happy living in the area. So, in the late spring of 1993 he once again packed up his car and moved.

Even though he had done it many times in the past, there was one drawback of moving that Sam always disliked. That was setting up new bank accounts, post office boxes or addresses, getting a new driver's license, and finding car insurance. He usually set aside one whole day for doing those tedious errands in an effort to get them out of the way all at once.

It was 2:30 in the afternoon on a beautiful May day. Sam had finished everything except getting car insurance. He had had State Farm for many years, so he looked up the local agent the night before. The office was actually a converted Victorian home right off of Main Avenue in downtown Durango. It had probably been renovated in the last 5 years based on its fine condition. The construction was solid, and the outside had been painted in a variety of beautiful pastel colors popular for Victorian renovations.

Sam entered into a large room, which was probably the living room of the original house. It contained two desks opposite of each other and another office in the back of the room that was separated from the main office by glass walls. The right desk was unoccupied at the moment. A young lady was at the other desk. She was on the phone, but immediately acknowledged him with a big, warm smile. She raised her index finger and mouthed, "Just a minute" and then pointed to a couple of chairs and a small table with the customary magazines.

The office was obviously furnished by someone with a love of the outdoors. The walls were decorated with a variety of large photographs. They included a sunrise over some high mountain peaks, Monument Valley in the winter under an incredibly blue sky, and one of a large Aspen grove golden in the fall foliage.

Sam walked over to the chairs. Before sitting down he looked at the photograph above the chairs. It was a picture of a couple of wolves looking out through some trees in the pine forest. Wolves always captivated him. Maybe it was his love of dogs. Yet, somehow he always felt a bit guilty. He knew the controversy about replacing wolves back into the wild of the "lower 48". Many people, mostly ranchers, wanted nothing to do with these creatures. They probably had some legitimate reasons. However, in Sam's mind it wasn't up to man to make that kind of judgment. God must have put them on earth for a good reason, he reasoned.

"It looks as if you like that picture?"

As Sam turned, the young woman was standing within a few feet of him, her hands clasped in front of her. Smiling she said, "Hi, I'm Lynda Gregory." Extending her hand.

She was quite lovely...maybe thirty. The thing that struck Sam the most was how serene she appeared to be. She was of medium height...about 5'5". She had straight, dark hair down to her waist. Woven into her hair was a couple of feathers with some beautiful strands of beads. She was wearing a satin, purple shirt with a tan, suede vest and broomstick skirt. Topping off the outfit were a pair of suede cowboy boots. He wasn't sure, but she looked part Native Indian.

He turned towards her, smiled, and extended his hand, "Hello, Lynda. My name is Sam Morino." Pointing back at the picture he said, "Yeah, I do like that picture. I don't know if it's politically correct since this is ranching country, but I've always loved looking at wolves. I find them mystical and magical at the same time."

She smiled that warm smile again. Well, you might like this. She turned a bit towards her desk. "Lobo...come here, boy." Just then, two furry ears appeared from behind her desk. As it came loping out from behind the desk, Sam first thought it was a wolf. Then, he realized it must be an Alaskan Malamute. This one was the tall, lanky type with shorter hair rather than the stouter, longhaired breed. Lobo came right up to Lynda wagging his tail. She knelt down to him and he began licking her face."

"He's beautiful...a Malamute?" asked Sam.

"Yes, that's my pretty boy."

Bending over, Sam extended his hand for Lobo to smell. "He looks friendly enough."

As Lobo was sniffing Sam, Lynda said, "He's a big softy, except with other dogs."

Lobo took to Sam immediately. He loved people, while barely tolerable of other dogs. Lynda noted their immediate connection. "I bet you didn't come in to talk about wolves and dogs. Can I help you?"

"I just moved in from out of state and I'm going to need car insurance."

Motioning to a chair next to her desk, she said, "Why don't you sit down here."

As she walked back to her desk chair and sat down, Lobo followed her and laid down nearby. Turning her attention towards her computer keyboard. She started to type a bit while looking at her monitor.

"How many people will there be on the policy?" Lynda always liked asking this question especially when she was asking an attractive, polite guy. It was a professional way to find out if he was single.

Sam sat down, grinning at the loyal dog nearby. "Just myself", he answered.

"Okay then, and your mailing address."

"P.O. Box 8383, Durango."

"Oh, that's a good number!" she said with hint of excitement.

Smiling, Sam said, "It is?"

Chuckling, she said "Sorry...it's a thing I have with numbers. Eleven is good number. You have it twice."

"Really. I didn't know that," he smiled back at her. "Why is that?

"Well, it's a numerology thing."

Lynda was slightly embarrassed, but Sam's smile overcame it quickly. "Will there be more than one car?"

"Well, I have a truck that I drive year round and an old Porsche that I generally only drive in the summer."

"Do you insure the Porsche for the whole year?"

"Yeah...Why?"

"If you don't drive it in the winter, you can just insure it part time and save some money."

"That sounds pretty good. I wonder why my old agent never told me to do that before."

Lynda did not want to talk badly about another office. "It may have just been overlooked by someone. I'm sure it wasn't on purpose."

"You're probably right."

She took the rest of the application quickly. Sam could tell she was quite efficient, while still taking the time to converse in a very genuine manner. He found it easy to talk with her.

"What made you decide to move to Durango?" she asked.

"Kinda job related."

"Oh, yeah. How so?"

"I was just hired by the ski area."

"Doing what?"

He knew that question generally followed his vague answer, but he always attempted to leave the answer as simple as possible. He always felt a little odd about answering. "President."

"That sounds a little more definite than...kind of," she smiled.

"Actually I was thinking about retiring somewhere out west and getting part time work. This job offer came through and it worked out great since I've always liked this part of the country."

"Well, congratulations on getting both of your wishes."

"Thanks. It is pretty cool."

By the time that Sam was signing the documents he had become very comfortable talking with Lynda. She had a grace about her that he rarely came across...and yet when she laughed; it was wonderfully big without being crude. Strange, his mom had the same characteristic.

"Do you mind if I ask you how long you have lived here?" he asked.

"I've been in Colorado most of my life. I was born in Denver and lived there when I was young. We moved to Grand Junction about the time I started middle school and stayed through high school. Then, my dad moved us to Phoenix. I moved here about six years ago, when they retired to Ridgway."

"What made you decide on Durango?"

"Well, we used to vacation here a lot when I was younger. I think mom liked being close to the Southwest because of her family and culture. She's Navajo. Anyway, I always thought that it was the prettiest part of Colorado. Not only does it have the beautiful mountains and lakes, but it is also close to the high desert and Monument Valley. I went back to Denver after my parents moved to Ridgway, but it was seven hours away from them. From here, they are only about 2 hours. It was an easy decision actually."

When the application was complete, Sam got up to leave. "Thank you very much, Lynda. That was the most enjoyable time that I ever had buying insurance."

Lynda got up and walked around to the side of the desk. Following her, Lobo got up and walked to her side. "Are you sure that you don't need a homeowner's policy?"

"Hopefully in the next 6 to 9 months...I'm starting to build soon out near Wildcat Canyon."

"Oh really, I love it out there...especially overlooking the canyon."

"That's where I bought land, a piece of the old Wyatt place. It used to be a big ranch, I think. It's right at the top of a knoll overlooking the canyon and high enough to see the distant mountains."

"I know that area. That ranch is gorgeous. You're very lucky."

"Thanks, I'm really happy about it and can't wait to start building."

"Have you thought about builder's risk insurance? It'll protect you for material theft on the job site or fire damage."

"I didn't know about that. I wonder why my last agent didn't tell me about that when I built."

"Maybe they just didn't do a lot of it in that part of the country. Do you want to sign up now or later?" asked Lynda as she smiled at Sam.

Enjoying the wonderful, pleasant aura that Lynda had, Sam couldn't think of anything that he'd rather be doing than spending some more time with her. "I probably ought to go ahead and take care of this right now if you have the time."

"Great. Come back in and we'll get those papers together quickly."

After another 15 minutes of paper processing and prolonging the conversation as much as possible, Sam got up to leave.

"By the way, where does one go in town for entertainment or good music?"

Smiling, Lynda said, "If you like live country music, then the _Sundance Saloon_ is usually dependable. Do you like rock 'n roll?"

"Well, it depends if I recognize it." He laughed. "I guess I like classic rock."

"The _Mother Lode_ is usually pretty lively. Another bet is the _Solid Muldoon_."

"Thanks for the tip. Do you ever visit those places?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she said, "Once in a while on girls' night out." Usually, I'm home with my daughter and Lobo."

"Oh, how old is your daughter?" No mention of a husband. That's good he thought. She is a lovely lady. Who knows? Maybe they could go out some time.

"She's seven."

"Do you both ski?" asked Sam.

"I try to get up to the mountain usually at least once every few weekends. It's a great way for Siera and me to spend time together."

"That's a beautiful name. Make sure you give me a call at the mountain this winter. I'd love to take a couple of runs with both of you. My number's on the application."

"Thanks...I'd like that."

Sam extended his hand. "It was a pleasure. Thanks for everything." He bent over to Lobo and scratched his head. "Good bye, Lobo."

"Have a good day, Sam," she said smiling.

After he left, Lynda bent down and gave Lobo a kiss on the nose and scratched his head behind his ears. "Yes, he was a nice guy. Wasn't he, pretty boy?"

### Chapter 13

### Running into Lynda

He had been looking at plumbing fixtures for almost an hour. Numbness was setting in. Picking out cabinets had been a lot easier. After an hour went by, the saleslady decided to give Sam a little more breathing room. She said to him, "Just flag me down when you need me". With that she walked away.

Sam was looking intently at faucets when Lynda came down the aisle. After seeing Sam, she slowed down her approach. At 15 feet she said, "Having trouble deciding?"

He looked up. "Hey, how are you Lynda? Nice to see you again."

It really was. He had thought about calling her a couple of times for lunch, but he had been busy getting settled at work and trying to get construction started on his house. He did get the opportunity to see Lynda at the office a couple of times about builder's risk insurance. Miraculously, he was able to get a building permit 30 days after submitting plans. Even so, it was a week after Labor Day and the framing was just completed. Fall was on its way, the days were getting shorter and cooler, and he still hadn't called Lynda for a date.

He walked over to her and squatted down next to the little girl standing close to Lynda. "And who is this pretty young lady? I bet your name is Siera."

The little girl's face lit up and she smiled. She grabbed her mother's hand a little tighter. "How did you know that?" She had the largest green, gray eyes that Sam had ever seen.

Sam looked up at Lynda and winked. Looking back to Siera he said, "Because your mother told me that she had a very special daughter. She, also, told me how kind and thoughtful she was and how very pretty she was too. So, as soon as I saw you...I just knew that you had to be her."

Siera looked up at her mom and gave her a hug around her waist. She was excited for the kind words from the stranger, but a little embarrassed.

Sam continued, "How did you get such a beautiful name?"

"Mom says that she named me after the Sierra Nevada Mountains because they were a magical place for her."

"Oh, that explains it. I can see why she named you that. You look pretty magical to me." Sam winked again at Lynda. "So, tell me. What are you doing at a building supply house?"

Lynda smiled back at Sam. Hoisting a small bag, she said, "I came for a replacement handle for one of my windows. You're not already putting in plumbing fixtures?"

"No, I've got a long way to go, unfortunately. I just like to get way ahead in the decision making process. Although, it is going slow and I'm getting kind of numb at this point."

She walked over closer to the display of faucets lining the wall. There were a lot of them. "Do you have any particular style in mind?"

"No, not really. My main concern is getting something that is generally appealing...especially for a woman."

She looked at him with a curious look with a bit of a smirk. She had wondered why she hadn't heard from Sam. Maybe there was new woman in his life.

"Oh, really? Someone new in your life?"

Grinning, shaking his head. "No, I just like to make sure that the kitchen and bathrooms are appealing to women without being too feminine. After all, they usually are the deciding role in buying a house, and I do want it marketable even though I have no plans of selling it."

She smiled at him, and then proceeded to step closer to the display. "Hmmm. No, those are too plain. That's a bit industrial looking."

Sam watched her as she investigated the faucets hung on the wall. She didn't linger on any one too long, which caught him by surprise. He thought that she'd take more time. Instead, she proceeded down the wall at a pretty fast clip. He also noticed that Siera was perfectly content to walk along with her mom looking at the plumbing fixtures. Not too many kids would do that in such a calm manner, he thought.

Finally, she paused. "What about this one for the bathroom sinks?"

He walked over to where they were standing. "Hey, that's not bad." It was a modern design with a hint of something from an earlier era. "What do I do about a kitchen faucet?"

"Well, there is usually a matching tub and kitchen faucet. If it's not on the display, it might be in a book."

Looking further down the wall. "Where's the kitchen faucets? There they are", she pointed.

Walking to them, she was intent on finding a match. Following her, he was impressed with her straight forward decision making.

"There you go," she said proudly pointing. "That's the kitchen faucet that matches the bathroom faucet."

He chuckled. "That's great. I've been here for almost an hour getting nowhere. You show up and I'm done in two minutes. How are you with picking floor tile?"

"Oh, I love it, but I'm better at laying the tile."

"You're kidding? You lay tile, really?"

"Yeah, my dad taught me a few years back. I really like it. It must fulfill my creative desire." She smiled. "Well, in reality I think I'm a bit anal. I like the order of the lines going straight."

She assured him that she wasn't in any hurry to get anywhere, and Siera was content to just be in her mom's company...so they spent the next hour in the floor tile section of the store. It didn't go nearly as quick as the faucets, mainly because there were so many tiles that both of them liked. But even though it did take a long time to find tile that Sam liked, time did fly by. The three of them laughed as they looked through the many displays.

After they spent so much time helping him, Sam thought it would probably be nice to offer to buy lunch for Lynda and Siera. Besides he was enjoying their company and hoped they wanted to join him. Happily for him, Lynda and Siera enthusiastically agreed to join him. The time was delightful. They chose a favorite little restaurant on the corner of Main Avenue in downtown Durango. Outside on the patio above the street, they enjoyed the warm September afternoon by watching the passing parade of tourists meandering along the street.

Sam had spent time with a lot of kids throughout his life, primarily in the ski industry. Many of them were charming and well-behaved...others weren't. He did spend time with his nieces and nephews, but they were family and he easily forgave any shortfalls that they might have. He quickly learned that Siera was a special little girl. Throughout lunch she was polite, listened attentively, and took part in the conversation. She spoke smartly and never interrupted. It was generally a bit weird because Siera acted older than her 7 years and was more enjoyable to be around than many adults that Sam came across.

"Sorry for taking up so much of your day. I'm sure this isn't what you and Siera had in mind when I ran into you." Sam was leaning on his knees and looking into Lynda's car.

"Oh, we had a great time!" She looked at her daughter who was strapped into the seat next to her. "Didn't we, Siera?"

"Sure did, Mom."

"See, I told you, Sam," said Lynda looking back at him.

"Well, thanks for helping me out again."

"My pleasure...and remember, give me a call if you need help with that tile work."

"I will probably do that."

"Good. Well, I think we better go, Siera. Say goodbye."

"Goodbye, Sam. See you later." Siera waved.

"See you later, Sam, and thanks again for lunch," said Lynda smiling.

Standing up, Sam waved. "My pleasure. Goodbye ladies."

Sam watched the Honda wagon drive away. He really liked them both.

### Chapter 14

### Helping with the house

By the time cabinets were going into Sam's home, November was more than half over. He finally had gotten lucky. The construction had gone better than any house he had built or remodeled. The plumbing and electrical were completed in two weeks' time and drywall was being installed the last week of September. It looked as if he'd be moved in by Christmas...remarkable.

It wasn't really cold, yet, but it was down into the 30's during the day. Since November hit, it seemed like the weather had gotten more blustery. But that didn't dampen Sam's spirits. He kept the inside of the house toasty, while he worked on it, by tossing scrap wood into the wood stove.

Today was pretty exciting because he was starting on the tile for the kitchen counter tops. Lynda was coming over again to help out. She had been a whiz at helping out with the bathroom floors. Mind you, he wasn't incompetent at tile laying. In fact, he had done enough of it in his previous houses to be pretty capable, but he never let on to Lynda opting for her company and charm. So, he was very content working as her assistant carrying tile, mixing mortar, and cutting tiles where she marked them. They made a very good team and had laughs doing it. Siera usually colored nearby or helped out here or there whenever she could.

As usual, Lynda showed up that morning with her coffee maker and gourmet beans. It became a ritual to lay tile and drink her exceptional coffee. Today was Hawaiian hazelnut. Over their first cup, they looked at the counter area planning out their strategy.

Lynda was holding one of the eight painted tiles that Sam had found in a catalog earlier in the summer.

"You know I really like these decorative tiles that you bought. They're not really southwest, but more like Italian. In any event, the bright blue and yellow goes well with this Pueblo color of the main tile."

Sam replied. "Thanks. As soon as I saw them I knew they'd be a perfect complement to the kitchen tile."

"How do you want to place them?"

"What do you think about interspersing them within the counter tile? Kind of randomly."

"I like that idea. Why don't we start laying out a pattern, figure where we're going to have to make cuts, and then..." she smiled at Sam, "you can mix me some mortar."

Sam mock saluted to her, which brought a beaming smile to Lynda's face. He then proceeded to mixing mortar.

Within a couple of hours they had all of the tiles set in place. It seemed that they had been more productive than normal, and then Sam realized why. Siera wasn't interrupting them. She was spending a couple of days with her grandparents in Ridgway. He never knew the time her interruptions took up before. Funny, it was never a bother to him. In fact, Sam thought that something was a bit different. Thinking about it, he missed the interruptions. He had grown fond of Siera since he started seeing more of Lynda. What wasn't hard to like about her? She was polite, caring, and a loving little girl. Spending the time around her made Sam realize what a piece of life he had missed out.

He started cleaning up the tiling tools. "You know, I miss not having Siera around."

Lynda looked up from counter. She was examing it to make sure all of the lines between the tiles were straight. "Really? That's awfully nice to say."

"It's true. She's a wonderful little girl and she blends in with you so naturally that it's weird not having you together."

Lynda smiled at Sam. "I see. Does that mean you don't like my company alone?"

"Not at all. I always enjoy it. It just seems natural to have the two of you together."

"Thanks. She is like my other half. We are like two peas in pod. It does feel weird though when she's away from me. Mom and dad insist on having her for a couple of days every month or so. They say that it's good for me. I think it's just an opportunity to spoil her when I'm not around. I have to admit it's these times when I pamper myself with long hot baths, reading for hours, or just walking through the woods. Even as good a kid as she is, raising her alone can be tough."

In the 5 to 6 months that Sam knew her, he hadn't heard, nor had he asked about Siera's father. Here was the opening. He had wanted to know for some time.

"Mind if I ask about Siera's father. You never talk about him."

"No, not at all. His name was Lou. I met him a few weeks after we moved to Phoenix and I started college. We fell hopelessly in love. Married our junior year of college. Siera came along a year after graduation. We couldn't wait to have more kids. He was a great guy in so many ways and unfortunately...Siera never got the chance to know him. He was on his way home from a business trip to Flagstaff when a drunk driver hit him head on in Oak Creek Canyon just outside of Sedona."

"I'm so sorry. I hope I didn't hurt you by asking."

"Really, I'm fine. Enough years have gone by that it doesn't hurt anymore. There was a time when talking about it would put me in a funk for days."

"You know, Lynda, I find it odd that you haven't remarried. You're such good company, not to mention good-looking." Sam smiled. "You're quite the catch actually."

"Well, thank you very much. I just haven't met the right guy, yet. I'm picky when it comes to finding a father for my baby girl. Besides there aren't too many guys out there looking to take on a ready-made family."

That was probably true enough thought Sam. He pondered something else as he poured himself a cup of coffee. How did he feel about Lynda? Since running into her at the building store, they'd seen each other every other week or so casually. Lynda dropped by the house often, either with a snack or to help out. If not, there was always a quick phone call to say "Hi".

In the last 6 weeks, they had become good friends. As for Siera, Sam enjoyed being around the little girl as well. She couldn't be any more charming.

"Would you like another cup, Lynda?" asked Sam.

"Please."

What the heck, she thought. Let's see where this takes us. After all they had been seeing each other on a regular basis for a while now even though there wasn't any commitment. No dating per se. Oh, they flirted now and then. A kiss here and there. No sex. By now, most of the guys that Lynda had dated in recent years would have tried to get into her pants. Sam didn't seem to have that intention although she did feel a certain sexual chemistry between them.

"I would like to get married again. I miss the companionship. Siera needs a father. And, I would like to have more children before I get much older. What about you, Sam? You never talk about your future...or a desire for a family."

Sam just finished taking a drink of coffee. The question took him a bit off guard.

"You know it seems like I used to spend a lot of years thinking about my future." Flashing back to his youth with Tina. "There was a time when I dreamed of kids."

He was focused over her shoulder and gazing out the window. Did she notice a slight shake of his head...as if he was saying no to something?

"Then, it just didn't seem like I was right for it. And before I knew it, the years were gone. It seemed like overnight. So, I try to live more in the now and keep my future in the near term."

The gaze was broken. Sam re-focused on her. He put his coffee down on the new tile counter and reached out to Lynda. It was spur of the moment. It surprised him. It surprised her. He held her close and gave her a kiss that was unlike any they had shared before. A long kiss.

Releasing her, he continued. "I don't know about next year or next month, Lynda. I do know that I like spending time with you and Siera now. I don't know what else I can tell you right now."

Sam did move into his new home before Christmas, but there had been a slowdown in the work because he was getting the ski area open for the season. As a result, he did have to use the port-a-potty in his front yard for a couple of weeks before the plumbing was totally finished. That wouldn't have been too bad if it hadn't been for the early snow and cold front that moved in to the area. Sitting on the toilet seat was exciting to say the least.

### Chapter 15

### Thanksgiving 1994

Sam and Lynda continued to see each other over the next year's time. Sam made it a point of inviting Lynda up every weekend for skiing with Siera. They didn't always make it up because of errands or commitments, but they went a lot that winter. He knew that she was probably on a budget and skiing wasn't the cheapest sport. So, he always made it a point of getting her on the mountain for free. That was really a treat for Lynda and Siera because they would never have been able to afford it otherwise. He always made time to take a few runs with them and take them to lunch, as well.

As the snow melted and the longer days of spring came, Sam spent his spare time back and forth between his house and Lynda's. She was a wonderful gardener. Trading landscaping tips from Lynda for hard labor, Sam was able to finish off his landscaping by summer's end. When they weren't digging in the dirt, Sam would pick up the girls and take a sight-seeing drive somewhere in the surrounding area.

Once again, the bright colors of fall faded and winter set in. Snow came particularly early that year and the resort appeared to be well on its way for a great opening.

Lynda invited Sam to join her and Siera for Thanksgiving in Ridgway with her parents. Because the resort was going to open any day now, he couldn't get back to Long Beach to see his family, which was disappointing to his parents and Gio. The thought of eating Thanksgiving dinner at a restaurant by himself wasn't particularly appealing. Oh, he probably would have been invited by a friend or Allen Collins, his boss. But, he couldn't think of anyone better to be with than Lynda and Siera.

Her parents lived up on Log Hill mesa just above Ridgway. The home was a rambling ranch surrounded by a white rail fence, which bordered both sides of the driveway. It sat on 10 acres with gorgeous vistas of the Sneffels Range. Four horses were cropping hay in the pasture in front of the house when Sam drove up.

Siera ran out to his car and was the first to meet him. She jumped into his arms. Lobo came running and jumped on him, also. Lynda was a close third, but didn't jump. Instead she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

Lynda's parents were very welcoming people. Sam could see right away where Lynda got her calming personality. Her mother was extraordinarily peaceful and elegant in an unpretentious way. She was taller than Lynda...probably about 5'7". She walked in a very graceful, smooth manner almost as if she floated from here to there. As long as Lynda's hair was, her mother's was longer. She could almost sit on it. Her voice was steady and warm. It must have been her Navajo blood that gave her such an exotic look. Anne was a beautiful woman and Sam could see her in Lynda.

As elegant as her mom was, Lynda's father was the opposite. When Henry Gregory extended his hand to welcome Sam, his hand was like a giant bear paw swallowing up Sam's average size hand. He was a big, rugged looking man. Probably about six-three and 230 pounds. All solid. He kind of lumbered when he moved. But, Sam had never seen a more doting, gentler guy than Henry. He waited on Anne as if she was a queen.

It wasn't the grand party that his family put on every year, but Sam made the right choice coming to dinner. There were a few of Lynda's relatives there that lived in Montrose, along with a neighbor couple. The food was a traditional Thanksgiving meal just like mom would have made if Sam had gone home. Nothing fancy, but worth two full helpings.

Sam had no intention of staying over, but the evening disappeared fast. The large group played a friendly game of poker for a couple of hours and then Henry broke out the old home movies on Super 8 film. Before he knew it, dessert was being served...again. It was 10 o'clock.

Lynda and her mom insisted that Sam spend the night. Neither one of them wanted him driving over three passes tonight, at this hour. Sam was easily convinced. Before he knew it, everyone was saying good night as he settled into the blankets on the couch in the family room.

A half-hour after his head hit the pillow; he was startled awake by Lynda kissing him on the lips. She knelt alongside the couch.

"I just wanted to say, goodnight, and that I'm glad you spent Thanksgiving with us," she whispered as she nestled against him.

Their eyes were only inches apart. He could smell the sweet aroma of her skin. Whenever he was close enough to her, he loved smelling it. In the light of the fireplace, Lynda looked very desirable. Her dark skin glistened. She had on a very lightweight silk top. A wide, low neck. It clung to her shape outlining her small breasts.

"Should you be here?" _Oh, I'm glad you're here._ "I don't want your dad coming after me with a shotgun."

"I'm old enough," she smiled. "Besides I won't stay long." _Unfortunately._

"That's too bad." _That was very unfortunate._

"Is that an invitation?" _I hope so._

"Depends if anyone heard you get up." _I hope everyone is sleeping like the dead._

"I don't think they did." _Who cares?_

"In that case, why don't you slide in under the covers for a bit." _And get real close._

"I thought you'd never ask." _And I'm getting real close._

The sexual tension was almost too much to handle for Sam. Lynda had on short, shorts and her bare legs intertwined with his. It had been a long, long time since he had laid this close to a woman. As if her soft skin wasn't enough, the thinness of her night clothes was impossible. He could feel every part of her body next to his. And it felt great.

They kissed for about 10 minutes. Their lips softly probing at first and then more fierce with hunger. He couldn't control himself any longer. He was getting excited. He was a bit embarrassed. Lynda felt him against her legs and wasn't embarrassed at all. Her nails scraped against his chest.

"I think I'd better get back to my room." _Unfortunately, but definitely the wise thing to do._

"Good. Well, not really. But, it's probably the smartest thing to do. I'm already not going to sleep tonight as it is." _Especially with this hard on._

She leaned to his ear and whispered. "Hope you dream about me." _I wonder if you know that I am in love with you._

"Oh, I'll be dreaming alright."

She smiled and winked at him.

Sam watched her beautiful butt walk away into the dark. Those silk shorts were impossible.

Well, that was fairly clear he thought. She liked him enough to crawl under the covers with him. Wow, she was beautiful...and young. About 10 years younger than him. While many guys his age wouldn't think twice about getting involved with a 30 year old beauty, Sam was thinking real hard.

Lynda was the perfect companion in so many ways. Simple as it sounded, he just liked being in her space. There were never any uncomfortable times when he thought he should say something, or said too much. They could sit and read for an hour on end at opposite ends of the sofa without saying a word...and it was perfect.

He had waited for someone like her most of his adult life. And yet he was troubled. Troubled by the age difference? Maybe, but it wasn't because he felt old or that he'd age long before Lynda. More than anything, he didn't want to be the reason for Lynda not living her youth and having the family she always spoke about.

Fatherhood was a simple thought for Sam when it came to Siera. He enjoyed spending time with her. She was the least taxing child he ever met, certainly, a loving and considerate child. So much like her mother. But, Siera was already 8 years old. He just didn't know if he had it in him to be a new father once or twice in the next 5 years. That would mean he'd be over 60 when their last child would graduate from high school. A baby was both appealing and gut wrenching.

"Damn." Speaking softly to himself. "That's too much to think about."

Sam changed his thoughts and fell asleep remembering Lynda's body next to his and the vision of the shorts walking away into the dark.

### Chapter 16

### The Long Wait

As always when the ski season got underway, Sam's life got more frantic. He found his time spent with Lynda limited during his second winter at the resort because of a major lodge expansion.

Lynda and Siera tried to meet Sam for at least a couple of hours skiing on the weekend. Sam always looked forward to seeing them. The break in the week was welcomed and they both had an ability of putting a smile on his face immediately. It wasn't quality time necessarily. It seemed like he always had an eye on some aspect of work no matter if they were on a chairlift, in a restaurant, or in a lift line. Nonetheless, he enjoyed being with them.

Once a week, they did get together for dinner. If it was relatively early, they'd meet at a restaurant in town as Sam was coming home from the ski area. If it was later, Sam would stop by Lynda's. He felt a little uncomfortable about how late he often arrived, but he sure looked forward to the company and Lynda's home cooking...especially her fried chicken. She had a knack of knowing when he needed "comfort food". Lynda never cared how late he showed up. Only that he did.

Their relationship slowly grew closer. Lynda became more dependent on Sam's company. He was tender and thoughtful to her. He was becoming a father figure for Siera. He always found time to spend a little one on one with her...discussing school, friends, or helping with homework.

However, every now and then, their relationship stalled. Not from fighting or incompatibility. It was brought on by Sam privately wrestling with the idea of committing himself to Lynda because of the age difference and the family question. It was a terrible battle for him. She was so easy to be with. Because of that, he never wanted to disappoint her. He never wanted to be the reason for her not having any more kids. He certainly didn't want to hurt Siera in the event that it didn't work out with her mother. One way or the other, he would have to come to a decision.

Lynda wasn't going out of her way to see anyone else except for an occasional date. She only did that when she thought that Sam wasn't interested in a permanent relationship. When she felt that way, it became easier to accept a date from a good prospect. The nights alone in bed would have been easier if she had any hope of those prospects panning out.

It also bothered her that Sam never made another advance towards her. After slipping in next to him on the couch in her parents' house on that Thanksgiving night, she couldn't help think that they'd sleep together soon. He certainly was aroused that night. Oh, they'd had some good make out sessions a time or two since, but each time he stopped when she was more than ready for him to take her to bed.

Lynda had never been one for casual sex since her husband had died. Her short, but happy marriage proved to her that relationships were blessed things. The thought of sleeping with Sam would have been an affirmation that he really cared and maybe marriage was in the near future. It was probably a twisted way of looking at it. Nonetheless, Lynda continued to wonder about Sam and his commitment to her.

Maybe, he'd have time to reflect while she was gone visiting her in-laws in Phoenix. Well, she still considered Lou's parents her in-laws. She thought that a couple of weeks away might be just the thing for Sam to focus on the relationship.

### Chapter 17

### A Mother's Suggestion, 1995

For the last few years, Tina had been meeting her mother on Wednesdays for lunch at their usual restaurant..."The Boathouse". It was a large, converted houseboat that was docked in the Long Beach marina. The food was simple, but good. It was known for its delicious breakfast, which was served until they closed at 3:00 o'clock. And you couldn't find better seafood for lunch in the harbor. The surrounding yachts bobbing in the water made it a favorite for both Tina and Darlene.

Wednesdays were the best day to get together because Tina had the day off. It also gave Darlene an excuse to get out of the house that had gotten so empty after Jack had died. She generally used any opportunity to get out since that Sunday afternoon barbecue when he had a heart attack in the backyard. After 46 years of marriage to the only man she loved, she found herself very lonely. That's why she played so much bridge over the last year and a half.

Besides going to work, lunch with her mom was an opportunity for Tina to get away from the house that gotten so empty after her divorce. In years past, Tina spent as much time as possible around the home. If she wasn't taking care of her son, Matthew, or her husband, she was doing some gardening project. Ron talked her into cutting back on hours at the store over the last few years. They were hoping for more kids and he thought being at home more might reduce her stress and they might get lucky after all these years. In the last year and half, her home was just a reminder of a failed marriage.

Tina's marriage had been over shortly after her father died the summer before last. She always thought it strange how both she and her mom had lost their husbands in the same year. She didn't know which would be harder...to lose a loving husband to a sudden heart attack, or to lose a mediocre husband to another woman. She knew the latter really sucked.

This afternoon was a glorious mid-January day. The California southland had been bathed in warmth for two days. It was not uncommon for that time of year, but it didn't happen that often. So today, Tina sat outside in the 82-degree sunshine overlooking the marina. She had always loved the sun and the ocean, especially in those long ago days with Sam on his surf trips up and down the coast. As the years went by she didn't sit out in the sun much anymore. While her skin had stayed clear and youthful, she decided a few years ago that it was time to heed the medical community advice and stay out of the ultraviolet rays. However, every once in while she made an exception when there was something special about a day. This day was too beautiful to pass up. There she sat in a red tank top exposing her youthful arms and soaking up the rays.

The waiter had just delivered her light beer when her mom showed up. "Hey, that looks good. I'll have one of those, too" Darlene told the waiter as she pulled out the chair next to Tina and sat down. "You look striking today. Can you believe this weather? Oh, my God it's wonderful, and I'm so glad you decided to sit outside. I've been cooped up in the house for days. Well, except for a bit of gardening in the backyard." Tina was just like her mom...always fiddling in the flower beds. "But, the four walls really felt like they were closing in on me. The fresh air smells great. I can't tell you how much I was looking forward to lunch today. Marge had called me up looking for a fourth today, but I just didn't feel like playing bridge again. What are you smiling at?"

Tina had been smiling at her mother throughout her rambling. It was good to see her animated. Since her father died, she had only seen her mother 'full of life' a couple of times. That was usually when she was talking to Matt.

"It's just good to see you...bubbly again, Mom."

Darlene was just about to light a cigarette, when she paused and looked at Tina. Smiling, she stretched out her hand and touched Tina's arm. She said, "It has been a long time...hasn't it, Tina? I'm sorry. Have I been a real downer?"

Shaking her head and chuckling, Tina said, "No, I've just missed your good spirits. I could always count on you cheering everyone up."

Taking a drag of her cigarette, Darlene looked out over the boats in the marina. "You know, honey, I've had a really good life. I never knew how happy I was to be married to your father until the night I didn't have him anymore. It was late after we had gotten back from the hospital. I remember everyone had just left the house except for you and your sister. Neither one of you wanted to leave me alone that night...both of you insisting that you would stay with me. But, I knew that I had to face the house alone sometime and it might as well be that night."

Looking back at Tina, Darlene continued. "So, I stayed up. I cleaned up the mess from the BBQ 'til about 3:00am and finally decided to go to bed. You know I used to dwell over the crummy things periodically. That night I lay in the dark with my hand rubbing Jack's side of the bed thinking about all of the good times we had. That's what finally put me to sleep. It was the next day that got me into this funk because he wasn't there when I woke up, and I knew he never would be anymore."

Tina leaned across the table and squeezed her mom's hand. "I'm so sorry, Mom. Are you okay?"

Smiling and looking out over the boats again, Darlene said, "Actually...I am. I don't know if it's this glorious weather, but I'm feeling the best I have since that horrible day." Looking back at Tina, she said pointedly, "How about you? You've been kind of down for a while yourself."

Bringing her right hand to her mouth, Tina looked up and away. The hand was trembling ever so slightly. "Oh, mom, it's been so shitty since that poor excuse for a husband ran away with that tramp!"

"When was the last time you heard from Ron?" asked Darlene.

"I don't know...maybe three weeks. He wanted to come over to pick up the rest of his things."

"You still have some of his things after all this time? How come?"

"Because I wouldn't give them to him. I guess I was trying to get back at him for hurting me."

"Don't you think that may have been a bit childish?"

"Mom, what would you have done if daddy had slept with another woman?"

Just then the waiter brought Darlene's beer.

"Thank you, very much," said Darlene.

"Are you ladies ready to order or would you like to wait a bit?" asked the waiter.

Darlene looked at Tina, who turned away and was trying to wipe her eyes without the waiter noticing that she was crying.

Darlene smiled to the waiter, "Why don't you give us a bit to enjoy our beers and this glorious weather. We'll flag you down when we're ready." With a smile, the waiter nodded and walked away.

Darlene took a drink of beer. Putting the bottle down she looked back at Tina, "Thank God I never had to think about that. I don't really know what I would have done."

"Well, it's really lousy, Mom. It hurts every time I think about the bastard. Hey...let me have one of those," said Tina, pointing to her mom's cigarette.

"You haven't smoked in years. Why now?" Darlene handed the pack and lighter that was on the table to Tina.

"I don't know...I just feel like having one." She lit one up and took a deep drag. Blowing the smoke into the air and then looking at the cigarette in her hand she said, "You know it was Sam that got me to quit smoking?"

"I know. He never liked you smoking." Darlene chuckled, "Used to say that he didn't like kissing an ashtray. Speaking of Sam, did I tell you I got a Christmas card from him?"

"Is he still sending you cards after all of these years?"

"Well, you know how close we were. Even after you two split up, he still made it a point to come by and see your father and me every once in a while. I think he planned it when he knew you wouldn't be around. And if he was in town, he would always drop by near the holidays."

"Didn't he take you to lunch for quite a while, too?"

Taking another sip of beer, Darlene chuckled, "He would call me out of the blue at the store and tell me not to make plans for lunch the next day. Do you know where he used to take me?"

Smiling, Tina asked, "No, where?"

Taking the last hit on her cigarette, Darlene put out the butt in the ashtray. She smiled, looking at Tina, and motioned with her finger pointing at the table. "Right here."

"You're kidding me. You never told me that."

"Well, I didn't tell you a lot about Sam. Actually, I saw him quite a bit. It was weird at first after you two split up and you went to Kansas City, but...I secretly hoped you two would get back together some day. And even though I know he hurt you deeply, and he did act like a jerk, I couldn't stay mad at him. In the end, you never got over the hurt. I think you were a little bitter, so I didn't speak about him to you, or about you to him."

"I appreciate that, and I wasn't bitter, mother."

"Oh, Tina, don't lie to me," Darlene said smiling.

"Well...maybe a little bitter."

"You had a right to be," said Darlene. "But, I don't really think he knew what he was saying...or doing. He was young. You both were. That's what scared me a bit when you two got engaged. But, I do believe you were made for each other. I really was shocked when you broke up. I always thought you should have given him a chance to sort things out."

"I couldn't forgive him, mom. Not after how he treated me."

"Well, in any event, even though you married Ron, Sam was the son I never had, and I didn't want to lose him. So, we always stayed in touch. Even when he moved out of state, he wrote Jack and me a long Christmas card every year and managed to call every so often.

Tina shook her head at her mom and grinned. "So, what did he have to say in the card?"

"He moved back to Colorado a few years ago around his birthday...May, I think."

"It was probably April," Tina said taking a drink of her beer.

"Ah! Still remember his birthday, do you?"

"He's an April Aries. A month before my birthday. Just continue, mom."

"Anyway, he quit his job at the ski resort back east and..."

"Ski resort?" perked Tina. "What was he doing for them? Chasing another dream and being irresponsible probably. What is it with men? They can never make up their minds and grow up. They either chase dreams or young girls like they're still boys." She picked up her beer and took a drink.

"Tina, he's been an executive in the ski industry for a number of years and it sounds like he's done pretty well for himself."

That caused Tina to pause her sipping. "You're kidding me. I remember you telling me years ago that he left a good job here working in the oil business to move somewhere in Colorado."

After all of these years, thinking about Sam was still like riding an emotional roller coaster. Tina looked out over the water. "You know, mom...the future scared him. At least, it started to in his second year of college. He didn't seem to have a plan and it freaked him out."

She looked back at her mom. "First, he wasn't content around here anymore. That's why he went away to college in San Luis Obispo. That hurt like hell, Mom. We were inseparable and then out of the blue he said he had to get out of here and get a different view on life. We were engaged and he didn't even ask me to go with him. To make matters worse, he became a little aloof. Then remember what happened?"

Darlene could see Tina's eyes glistening again. "I think so."

"I decided to drive up and surprise him. He and his roommates were throwing one hell of a party when I arrived. I caught Sam on the back porch kissing some girl. I expected more from him, mom. After that I found it hard to accept less than what we once had."

"You know, Tina, you might have expected too much, too early."

"What do you mean?"

"Tina, you have always known what you wanted ever since you were a young teenager. You defined your adult life pretty early in life. You knew you wanted to work in the grocery store and then have a family. But, you were abnormal. Most kids, especially guys, struggle to find their place in life later. Your father was the same way. I think if you had just forgiven him, Sam would have found his way just fine and taken care of you along the way."

"Oh, Mom," said Tina with a bit of skepticism.

"Well, I think he did pretty well for himself and he's certainly matured over the years. He said that he's partially retired and doing consulting on the side."

"Partially retired?" asked Tina astonished.

"Not bad, huh?"

"What else?" asked Tina partially disillusioned.

"Do you remember how fascinated Sam was with your dad's architectural drawings? He loved talking construction with Jack."

"So?"

"Sam just finished building a custom home. Evidently, he's done a few of them over the years. He said that he thinks he finally got it right this time," said Darlene smiling.

"You're really enjoying this aren't you, Mother?"

"I'm sorry, honey. What can I say? I like him...I always have. It's nice to hear he's doing so well. Anyway why should it bother you? You've been through with him for over 15 years."

"Yeah, I know. I just can't believe he's been an executive all of these years in a business I didn't think was that serious."

Tilting her head and looking at Tina quizzically, Darlene wasn't quite sure what her daughter was thinking. In the early years of Tina's marriage, she seemed to be happy. Ron was never a doting husband, but he was a good provider. It was her son, Matthew that brought Tina her real joy in that marriage. Actually, Darlene was surprised the marriage lasted as long as it did.

Tina had been unhappy for a couple of years leading up to the point when Ron started cheating on her. Since the divorce Tina had plenty of suitors, but none that she fancied. Could it be that she was sorry that she and Sam never made up?

They finally ordered lunch and were enjoying a very tasty meal during that lovely afternoon. Tina and her mother had always gotten along well. Including her sister, Joanne, the three were very close and could talk about anything.

Putting her fork down, Darlene picked up the pack of cigarettes and lit one up to complete her meal. Tina was just finishing up her seafood salad when her mother finally asked the question.

"Did you ever think about looking Sam up since your divorce?"

Surprised, Tina picked up her napkin and wiped her mouth. Putting it down, she said, "Come on, Mother."

"I'm serious. It's been a year and a half since you split up with Ron and you haven't dated anyone more than twice. You would like to marry again, wouldn't you?"

"I didn't see the point of dating any of them more than twice, and yes. I would like to marry again...and as crazy as it sounds, maybe even have another baby."

"Oh, that'd be nice...even at your age. I'd like to be a new grandma again."

Tina's jaw dropped with a smile. "Thanks a lot, mom. I'm only 40. I'm still young enough."

"Oh, I didn't mean it that way. Well, did you ever think about what it would be like to see Sam now?"

Letting out a sigh, and looking out over the water through boat masts, Tina responded, "Yeah...occasionally when things weren't going well with Ron, or we were having a fight. Then, I realized what a stupid idea it was."

She turned to look at Darlene. "My God, mom. Why are you so intent on this?"

"Cause I just want to see my daughter happy. And Sam's a good man. He's always been a good man...well mostly."

Lamenting, Tina responded. "It was so long ago. There's no telling what he's up to. Neither one of us are the same people that we were."

"Oh, phooey! Of course you're the same person. Okay, so you're not 20 anymore. You have a teenage son, a few wrinkles on your still pretty face, and if you have any gray hair, it doesn't show up on that blonde head of yours. Tina, the reason why you and Sam loved each other once may not have changed. And if it hasn't, you're old enough now to talk through the old pain."

With her left elbow on the table, Tina leaned her chin onto her hand and gazed out over the marina. "Is he married or seeing anyone?"

"If I remember right, he's been divorced for about 12 years or so. He married, but it didn't last very long...something about a drunken weekend, or a vacation."

"I don't know, mom. Calling him out of the blue is a little bit weird, don't you think?"

"I've got a better idea. When was the last time you skied?"

"Skied? Probably, five years ago. Ron and I went to Big Bear for a weekend. It was a disaster. Why?"

"Why don't you take a ski vacation to Colorado, and look him up?"

"You've got to be kidding?"

Darlene puffed her cigarette. Blowing the smoke out, she looked right at Tina. "Am I? You need a vacation. I'll stay with Matt while you're gone. Besides, you've never been skiing in Colorado. It sounds lovely according to Sam. Who knows it could be very romantic...snow falling from the sky, warm fires crackling in the stone fireplace. What do you have to lose?"

Leaning back in her chair and looking across the boat masts in the harbor, she took the last sip of beer in the bottle. Finally, Tina replied, "Nothing."

### Chapter 18

### To Colorado

As it turned out, Tina felt good about going away for a week. Since Ron left her, the last two Christmas seasons had drained her. That made her feel more unforgiving towards Ron because she blamed him for taking away the time of the year she loved most. Christmas used to be a time of renewal for her. Her doldrums continued through winter and now all she could think of was how empty the house felt. Flying away this last week of January was just the excitement she needed.

The flight to Durango had a connection through Phoenix. The trip from Los Angeles to Phoenix was a little over an hour and was quite comfortable. She ordered a glass of wine from the flight attendant and enjoyed looking out the window watching the landscape slip by.

Her layover in Phoenix was about 45 minutes. It gave Tina time to run to the restroom and pick up a magazine from the newsstand. It wasn't long after airborne that Tina's stomach started to jump. She rarely got air sick, and today's flight was pretty smooth. It was too weird. She felt fine on the first leg. Why was this happening now? She tried to settle in with her magazine, but after 15 minutes she gave up and returned to looking at the landscape below.

There was no doubt about it. She was nervous. Here she was flying to a place she'd never been before to look up an old boyfriend she hadn't seen in what seemed to be another lifetime ago. Admittedly, she was excited at the same time.

Slowly the reddish-brown desert of the Southwest started getting spotty with snow. The white was tucked away into the countless folds of the Navajo Indian Reservation below. In the approaching distance she could see the tree-covered mountains and their increased snow cover.

Before she knew it, the jet was taxiing towards the terminal. Like others aboard, Tina started to pull herself together for de-planing. One look out the window and she was glad that she decided to carry on her parka. She could see the wind whipping the pants and jackets of the airport staff outside the terminal. Along with the dark, gray clouds overhead, the scene triggered a shiver up her spine. She already felt the cold of the Rocky Mountain winter, and she hadn't even stepped outside, yet.

The two-lane road that made its way back to Durango was fairly simple as the girl at the rental car counter said it would be. It allowed Tina to wonder how she was going to approach Sam. Her mom had his address and phone number from the Christmas card. The hard part was going to figure out how she was going to contact him. He certainly wasn't expecting to see her. She did check with the ski area to make sure he was in town this week. A nagging feeling kept creeping into her thoughts...please don't let me find him with another woman...again.

Tina started coming out of her fog by way of the distractions along the road. She had been winding along highway 172 over gently, rolling hills covered here and there with snow. Gradually the spotted array of houses became a little more numerous. She came to the intersection of highway 160 and turned west as directed...9 miles to go.

It was a little after 4:00 pm and the sun was getting low in the sky when she approached town. The wind didn't seem to be blowing as hard, but the clouds were still gathering overhead. Tina looked at the outside temperature reading on the overhead dash...22 degrees. Snow was probably heading this way. She smiled to herself. It had been years since she'd seen it snow, and she was kind of looking forward to it. Not knowing how much snow they received in town, she did notice that the ground alongside the highway appeared to be covered with about 6-inches.

According to the information on the Durango web-site, the historic downtown ran for about six blocks on Main Ave. It began at the train depot of the Durango-Silverton railroad and went north. Tina decided to stay at the Strater Hotel in the historic district. After speaking with the reservationist, it sounded like the hotel was centrally located within walking distance to shops and restaurants. She might as well enjoy and explore the area as long as she was there.

Pulling off of highway 550, she turned right on 7th Street towards Main Ave. Approaching the railroad crossing she saw what had to be the back of the hotel. At least she assumed it was. The building was red brick with white trim, and it was supposed to be on this corner. Sure enough, that was it. Turning right on Main Ave., she was fortunate to find a parking spot just down from the front of the hotel. Turning off her car and gathering her gloves and hat, she exited. Once on the sidewalk she quickly pulled on her hat and gloves. She wasn't used to this kind of cold. Crossing her arms, she looked up and down the street. It was so lovely. The streetlights almost looked like the old gas ones that she had seen in old-time pictures, but were electric simulations. The posts had banners hanging off to the side advertising "Snowfest". It must be some type of a winter carnival or festival. The town had the flavor of an old-west mining town with a mixture of old Victorian storefronts and modern replicas.

Tina hurried through the front door to escape the cold and stepped into the past. She'd never seen this much authentic Victorian furniture. Combined with the crystal and lace it was like being transported back a century to the frontier when gold and silver were kings. She couldn't help but look up and notice the imprinted tin ceiling. A ragtime piano filled the air from somewhere close by. Walking to the front desk in the back of the lobby, she discovered that the music was coming from the adjoining bar opposite the desk. The sign over the door read "The Diamond Belle Saloon". She'd have to go in there later.

The check-in was quick and smooth. Before she knew it, a bellman was guiding Tina to her room. They rode a tiny elevator to the second floor and walked down the uneven hallway to the right. At the end of the hall, he opened a door to a small, but elegantly appointed room of antiques overlooking Main Ave.

After tipping the bellman on his way, she slowly circled the room investigating the furnishings. Peeking out through the curtains to the street below, she saw that night was setting in and it had begun to snow lightly, but quite steadily. The lights lit the street up for the many people strolling along the sidewalks. A smile crossed her face. It felt good to be in a place so different from her life. From what she had seen of the town, she thought it was cute. She decided to go exploring after dinner.

### Chapter 19

Meeting an Old Friend

It was about 8:00 pm by the time that Tina relaxed in her room from the travel and finished dinner in the hotel restaurant. Feeling a little restless and not particularly wanting to stay in an empty room, she decided to wander down the street for a while. During dinner she had peered out through the window and watched the snowflakes gently falling from the sky. The scene reminded her of the snow globe that she had when she was a kid. Tonight, Durango looked like someone had turned it upside down and shook it up. The atmosphere was very inviting.

She stepped out of the lobby door onto the sidewalk. Even though it must have been around 20 degrees, the sidewalk was busy with people. Heading south, she made her way slowly down the street stopping here and there to look in shop windows. Occasionally, she popped into a store to look at a piece of clothing or piece of turquoise jewelry that caught her eye.

By the time she reached _The Olde Muldoon_ , Tina was getting a little chilled. The boots that she was wearing weren't keeping her feet as warm as the salesman in Huntington Beach had promised. Why didn't that surprise her? Looking through the window, the room was crowded with smiling people and more importantly, it looked warm. She walked in and noticed that most of the tables were occupied. That was okay...she really didn't want to sit at a table by herself. So, she opted for a seat at the near end of the bar not far from the entrance.

The coffee and brandy hit the spot as soon as she took a sip. Looking around, she noticed it was a mixed crowd. The age scale went from 21 probably through early sixties. What she liked most was that it had an obvious mix of locals as well as tourists. The bartender knew many of them at the bar and waved to a few here and there as people came and went.

Looking down the long room through the crowd, she noticed a small stage at the far end. It didn't look like it was set up for a band, but maybe for a couple of people. She spotted at least one guitar over the many heads in between her and the stage. It would be nice to hear some live music, she thought.

The smell of cigarette smoke was too much too fight back. Tina took out the pack that she had been carrying for emergencies and lit up a smoke. Enjoying the moment, she sipped her drink and dragged on her cigarette. She couldn't remember the last time she sat in a bar by herself, let alone smoking. It felt kind of good to be away from home. Watching the bartenders and listening to the crowd, she started slipping into a calm.

Suddenly, there was a sound of a guitar being strummed. She leaned out from the person next to her and looked towards the stage. It couldn't be...could it? He was a good fifty feet from where she sat. It had been more than 16 years since she saw him, but it did look like him. What was he doing playing guitar in a bar? With all of the people in the room, it was a cinch that he hadn't noticed her.

Sam started his set with a slow version of the George Harrison song "While My Guitar Gently Weeps". She had never heard it done that way before, only the version on the _Beatles White Album_. When he had finished, Sam received a very nice round of applause. He had barely finished, when he started up again with "Taxi" by Harry Chaffin.

Not being able to wait any longer, Tina called the bartender over. "Excuse me...who's that playing?" she asked.

"That's Sam Morino", said the bartender. "He's a local guy...believe it or not, he actually runs the ski area."

"I thought that was him. Does he play here often?"

"Maybe a couple of times a month. He's a good friend of the owner, so they have a standing arrangement. Whenever Sam wants to play, and there's no other entertainment...he plays."

"You said you know him?"

"From a long time ago...in another place."

"Do you want me to tell him you're here?"

"I'll say hi later. I think right now that I'll just enjoy listening."

She didn't know if it was the coffee, the brandy, or the fact that Sam still sounded good singing and playing his guitar...and he looked great, at least from this distance. She ordered another brandy and sat there drifting along with the songs. Sam was playing a variety of songs by Dan Fogelberg, Patsy Cline, the Beatles, Simon & Garfunkel, Neil Young, Rick Nelson, Willie Nelson, John Denver, and blending them in with some current popular country artists like Garth Brooks and Clint Black. She also recognized a couple of his own songs from years ago. With the finish of each song came a hearty applause, but the biggest came after he had played two songs with a mandolin. She could swear it was his father's mandolin. The first song was an instrumental. The second was the Italian love song _"Ritorna-Me"_ that Gio always played for his wife at family gatherings. Did that bring back some memories?

Sam rarely stopped for more than a couple seconds in between songs except to take a drink of water. Finally after about an hour, he spoke.

"Thank you very much. You've been very kind tonight. I've got one more song for you before I say goodnight. I hope you like it....It's one of my favorites."

Sam played a four-bar intro and began to sing.

" _It's late in the evening..."_

Tina recognized the song immediately. Sam played it often so many years ago for her. She always loved his version of Eric Clapton's _"You Are Wonderful Tonight"_.

" _She puts on her makeup, and brushes her long, blonde hair."_

He wasn't even halfway through before a tear ran down from the corner of her eye. Looking down at her drink she softly wiped it away with her little finger.

The crowd of people gave him a warm applause when he finished the song. After he set his guitar in the stand, he said "Goodnight. Drive safe and God bless", and then stepped over to the bar at the far opposite end of Tina.

Sitting back from the bar, Tina was out of his sight. She noticed that he was standing and talking with some people at the other end of the bar who were obviously friends. After a minute or so, she called the bartender over.

"I hate to bother you."

"Not a bother...what can I do for you?"

"Does Sam drink anything in particular? I'd like to buy him a round."

"Usually a glass of red wine, or occasionally, he'll drink a Coors Light."

Smiling, Tina said, "He hasn't seen me in a very long time, and he doesn't know that I'm here. Would you take him a glass of your best house red?"

Smiling back at Tina, the bartender said, "Sure...do you want me to tell him who bought it. He's going to ask, you know?"

"Yeah, you better. That's why I'm in Durango. Tell him it's from the girl that he used to sing that last song to almost 20 years ago."

The bartender gave her a curious look and smiled as he walked away.

She took a deep breath as the bartender took the glass of wine to the other end of the bar. She leaned forward just far enough to see the bartender set the glass down in front of Sam. Sam turned toward the bartender looking puzzled, and said something.

Tina could swear she just swallowed a golf ball as the bartender turned and pointed right at her.

Sam leaned over the bar and looked towards Tina at the far end. He smiled at her quizzically for a second. Tina waved back at him, and then a big smile broke over his face.

In a million years Sam would have never thought to see Tina Miller here in Durango. He thought she was out of his life forever. On the occasional visit back to Long Beach he would wonder about bumping into her. In years past, he would drift into the store that he thought she was still working at in hopes of seeing her. He did once many years ago. It was quick and very uncomfortable for him. And yet, here she was. He had no idea why she was here, but he couldn't wait to ask her. He grabbed the glass of wine off the bar, and made his way through the crowd.

The moment of truth was approaching. "What in the hell was she doing here?" she thought to herself. The golf ball in her throat was getting larger. It sure seemed like it took him forever to cover the 50 feet, partly because he was stopped a couple of times by people saying "Hi" or just patting him on the shoulder.

Finally, he walked up to her smiling, and looked at her for what seemed like minutes, but was actually just a couple of seconds. "It has been a long time since I played the guitar in front of you. What are you doing in this out of the way part of the world?"

Tina grinned from ear to ear. "My Mom said that I needed a vacation, and recommended that I go skiing here."

He nodded and paused for a second. "Your mom was always a wise woman."

"She always had a soft spot for you."

Sam smiled, "Like I said..." He then looked straight into her azure eyes. After all those years, they still hypnotized him. "You look terrific." He wasn't lying.

"Thanks...so do you. I see you're still playing your guitar...and the mandolin."

Sam kind of gestured to the stage with the wine glass in his hand. "Yeah, I play here every now and then. As long as the crowd enjoys it, they keep letting me come back. The owners are friends, so I don't charge anything." Chuckling he continued, "That's probably really why they let me play."

"You're done for the evening?"

Nodding, Sam said, "Yeah." Still grinning, he shook his head, "Durango...I can't believe you're here. Never in a thousand years. How did you end up at the Muldoon?"

"I took a walk after dinner, and came in here to warm up. Never thinking for a minute that I'd see you here, let alone that you'd be playing here. Was I surprised!"

Sam was so surprised. "That's two of us. Where are you staying?"

"At the Strater Hotel."

"Good choice. Is your room nice?"

"Yeah, it's lovely. Looks right out over Main Avenue."

Gesturing over to a table in the front corner of the room, Sam said, "Look, since you're here...would you like to maybe sit down and catch up on time?"

Smiling, Tina said, "Yeah...that's kind of why I'm here. I'd like that very much."

The front corner of the room was a quiet place to sit away from the crowd. There was a large picture window looking out to the street, and a pot-bellied stove nearby warmed the area.

"I'm sorry about your dad dying, Tina. He was always very nice to me. I remember him often whenever I decide to remodel or work on my house. I still draft my own plans because of his help when I wanted to learn about architecture. Your mom said that it was sudden."

"Yeah, one minute he was barbequing steaks and the next minute he was face down in the grass. He was dead before the paramedics got there. Mom took it real hard." Tina paused and looked away briefly. She knew her mom had had a much happier marriage than she did.

Looking back at Sam. "It'll be two years in July and I think she just finally came to terms."

It was strange for both Sam and Tina at first. They fidgeted for a while as they started to talk about home, family, and friends. These were safer subjects than their relationship. They were both excited to see each other, but not exactly sure how to proceed about discussing their feelings. Since their break up so many years ago, they hadn't spoken to one another.

"Mom tells me that you got into the ski business and did pretty well", said Tina. With a smile, she added, "An executive of some sort?"

Nodding a little, Sam replied, "Well...yeah, I did actually. I got into the business shortly after I left California in 1980. Since then, I've had some good breaks and steadily climbed up the ladder of responsibility. Unfortunately, I've been moving around ever since. You might say I'm a problem solver. In '89, I got a job offer as president for Killington Resort in Vermont that was hard to turn down. I didn't think that I'd ever live east of the Rockies, but in hindsight...I liked many things about Vermont. But, I think that I've finally planted some roots here in Durango and with any luck...easing into retirement."

"President, and now retiring?"

"Well...not retired, yet. I'm down to about 3 to 4 days a week at the local resort, Paradise Valley. Hopefully, I'll be totally done in about a year...and if not, that's okay too. I love the business. There is never a dull moment."

"I remember when you left Long Beach to find your life in the mountains. My mom told me that you took her to lunch before you left." Tina never could understand how a kid who grew up on the beach and in the suburbs of southern California could leave. Especially, when he really didn't know anything about living in the mountains. "I was surprised, but it sounds like it was the right choice...except for all that moving around."

Sam looked across the table into those eyes of Tina's. Her face...she was still beautiful after all of those years...maybe even more so. The slight laugh lines around her eyes and mouth seemed to enhance her face. It could have been the room. It was softly lit, but he suspected it didn't matter.

The thought of moving around, especially away from home never really settled with her. He now admired that. Turning to look outside through the window he said, "It was the right choice. I've been happy almost every day living up here in the mountains. Work was a struggle for a while, and the money was really crummy for a few years. But, every time I visited home, or had to go to another city, I realized how happy I was to get back to the mountains. I feel much the same way here as I did long ago along the beaches."

He turned back to look at Tina and smiled. "You know I left southern California for a couple of reasons. It seemed that the emptiness and beauty of the beaches was disappearing. Maybe it was just the crowding and stress of southern California; it just took away the serenity that I used to love about the ocean. I found that same magic in these high, empty spaces, Tina."

She nodded and smiled. "Do you think you might have time to show me some of that magic?"

"How long are you going to be here?"

"I guess it depends. I bought an open-ended ticket." Tina didn't know what to expect. So, she thought that she'd play it safe...she didn't want to be stuck there if this ended up being a big mistake."

Smiling back, he said, "Let's start tomorrow morning."

### Chapter 20

### First Day on the Slopes

The next morning broke clear with hardly a cloud in the sky. No wind was the extra bonus that Sam had wanted, and he got it. He knew that first impressions were very important, whether it was for a customer, or someone just visiting for the first time. It couldn't have been a better day for Tina's first taste of Colorado skiing.

Before arriving at the hotel, he stopped at the little A-frame bakery just off Rio Grande Ave. He had stumbled onto the place when he first hit town, and had been going back ever since. Laura, the owner, had become a good friend, and Sam loved the French Vanilla coffee. He got two cups...both with cream. He grabbed a couple of sugar and sweet n' low packets. He smiled to himself. Years ago he and Tina spent a lot of time drinking coffee, either at work or after work at the nearby coffee shop, and eating pie. She always drank it sweet and light. He had stopped adding the sugar quite a while ago. He wondered if she did.

"Two cups, Sam?" asked Laura.

"Hi, Laura. Yeah. I'm picking up a friend at the Strater to go skiing." Laura was what Sam referred to as an Earth Momma. She wore Birkenstock sandals throughout the year, never wore any make up, and dressed quite plainly. Somehow it suited her. Laura was sexy in her own simple way.

Taking his money. "Good day for it...looks like about three inches fell last night in town."

Looking outside and then back to Laura. "Should be pretty nice. It looks like the storm is clearing out."

"Who's the friend?"

Smiling at her, "I'll tell you when I have more time. You wouldn't believe it."

"Must be a woman" she smiled.

Almost grinning back to her, "You're right. See ya, Laura."

Tina was already in the lobby when Sam walked in. He looked like he just stepped off the ranch. He was wearing jeans, cowboy boots, an oiled Drover's coat, and a dark brown cowboy hat. The brim was flat with a rope band ending in a braid of horse hair.

"That's a great coat! You look like you stepped out of a Western." she said nodding her head.

Looking down at himself quickly, nonchalantly he said, "Thanks...it's perfect for the winter here, or rain for that matter. I've got my ski clothes at the resort. You ready to go?"

"I think so."

"Okay, let's go."

Outside the weather was still a brisk 15 degrees, but absolutely clear. Tina shivered a bit as she stepped out of the hotel. The cold hit her right away, but it might have been the brightness of the morning that sent the chill down her spine. She settled into his Explorer just as Sam got in. The seat was heated. It felt great.

"Do you still like your coffee sweet and light?" he asked, reaching down to the cup holders between the seats. He handed Tina one of the coffees.

"Yeah, I do thanks. That was real sweet of you."

"Speaking of sweet...the sugar is right there," Sam said pointing to the packets in the built-in tray between the cups. "I didn't know if you still added the sugar or Sweet 'n Low, so I brought both."

She smiled to herself. Sam hadn't changed in one way for sure. He was as thoughtful as ever. While she prepared her cup, Sam steered the truck around the corner.

"What about you? Do you still drink it sweet and light?" she asked.

"No...actually I stopped adding sugar quite a while ago. I dated someone a long time ago who had a thing about white sugar." He smiled at Tina. "She kind of convinced me to stop." He raised his eyebrows. "If you know what I mean."

Sam always loved the drive up highway 550 through the Animas Valley, and today it was especially fantastic. For the first ten miles out of Durango, the valley was about a mile wide before it narrowed at Hermosa. In the valley floor, the river meandered through the old ranch lands that were now filled with executive homes, condos, and a golf course community. When he first came through in the late seventies, the valley was mostly ranch property and a little farming.

Holding the wheel with one hand, he pointed while holding his coffee with the other. He said, "I came through here years ago on vacation after college. At that time, most of this valley was undeveloped. The homes that were here had acreage. It was really lovely then because it was so unspoiled. Luckily, most of the development since has been tasteful...not all, but most." Pointing at the river, Sam continued, "That's the River de Las Animas or the River of Lost Souls."

Tina was taking in the scenery as fast as she could while still trying to focus on Sam's tour narrative. In the short time that she had spent talking with him last night and on the trip this morning, she sensed one thing. He seemed very in tune with this place. It was in the way he spoke...his demeanor. He looked very much at peace.

The drive was lovely. She was surprised how different the mountains were from southern California. The San Bernardinos and San Gabriels were much drier and just didn't seem as immense and lush as these. The clear air and bright sunshine exaggerated all of the colors. The mountain peaks and cliffs along the highway were laced with deep, red soils. The pines were dark green and heavily laden with fresh snow. This landscape was against the backdrop of an amazing, blue sky.

Before she knew it they were turning into the Paradise Valley Ski Resort. A massive rock and log archway marked the entrance over the road. The access road wound its way uphill with parking lots on either side. Sam and Tina passed the customer parking lots and were approaching several buildings that looked to make up a village complex. The mountains beyond the building were laced with ski slopes that meandered down to the village.

Pulling up behind a two-story building, Sam paused at a gated entrance. He pressed a garage door opener that was attached to his visor, and the gate-arm raised. He pulled into an open space in the first row behind a building.

"This is the administration building, Tina. I'll take you through here on the way through the village and rental shop so you'll know your way around a bit."

On entering the door, the building was surprisingly like many offices Tina had been in throughout her life. Scattered along the hallways were offices. Some were single ones while others were larger spaces with cubicles. The walls were decorated with skiing memorabilia, advertising, and photographs of the ski area...some dating back many years she guessed based on the clothing. As they passed through, Sam waved and said "hello or good morning" to everyone he came in contact with. The responses were warm and pleasing.

Approaching the end of the hallway, it opened up into a lobby area. Straight-ahead was a glass door to the village courtyard. Sitting off to the right was a young woman behind a counter. She had a headset on, and based on the conversation, Tina assumed that she was the general operator. To the left was another entrance to a larger office.

Sam waived at the operator and then pointed to the doorway on the left. "Come in here for a second. Tina, this is Julie, my assistant. Say Hi, Julie."

Behind the counter was an attractive, older woman. Tina thought that she was probably in her late fifties. Julie was actually quite stunning. She had beautiful thick, dark brown hair piled on top of her head. She had a deep tan, probably from skiing, but her skin did not look weathered in the least. Her eyes were green with a hint of mischief."

"Of course, I'll say hi", said Julie in a Texas twang. "Do you think I'm going to ignore her? Honest to goodness, Sam." Julie stood up, and walked around her desk to Tina extending her hand. "Hi, Tina. So you're the reason he's late today? Seeing you explains why."

Sam looked at Julie with a smile. He loved her wit. She treated him like a younger brother more than a boss. She was very efficient and a perfect assistant. "That'll be fine, Julie. You'll have plenty of time to talk about me behind my back. Tina's going to be here for about a week."

"Sam, you know I don't have to wait and talk behind your back. I'll do it right in front of you," smiled Julie. "It was nice meeting you, Tina." She winked and pointed at Tina, "We'll have time to talk later and you can fill me in about Sam and all his secrets."

Shaking his head in amusement, Sam looked at Tina and pointed into his office. "I'm in here."

Tina entered. The office was about 16 feet square. To the left was a table that served as Sam's desk. From his chair, he could look out the window and get a panoramic view of the base area and ski slopes. Behind his desk chair was a credenza. To the right was a round glass coffee table surrounded by two, large leather chairs on one side and a matching love seat on the other side. Decorations were minimal, but it was a welcoming space.

"It's a lovely office, Sam," she said as she looked around slowly. "What kind of wood is that?" she asked looking at the walls.

"That's aspen. You don't see it a lot...especially on walls. Most people use pine or cedar. The aspen is a little unusual because it tends to be whiter, and it has this red grain," said Sam pointing to one of the boards.

There was a small section of pictures hanging on the wall that piqued her attention. She immediately recognized Sam's parents, sisters, and his grandfather.

"Oh! How's Gio? I love that dear old man."

"He started to slow down just a tad last year, but for 95 years old...he's doing just great. I talk to him often. Still has his lust for life."

"Ninety-five!" she said looking at the pictures. "Where does the time go? I still remember your parents' Christmas parties like they were yesterday when he used to sing. Has any of your family been out to see you here?" she asked while still looking at the pictures.

"Mom and dad have been out a couple of times. You remember Katie, my older sister. She and her husband, Rob, are talking about coming out this summer."

Walking over to the window she peered out. She didn't realize it before, but the building was about 6 feet above grade level. So the view had an even more captivating presence from the added height.

"What a view," she said with quiet awe. "You didn't get that in downtown L.A., did you?" she asked.

Shaking his head in agreement and with a little mischievous smile, Sam said, "No. I guess that's one of the reasons why I left. Come on. Let's go get you some equipment so we can get on the slopes."

Walking past Julie, Sam said. "Julie, I'm taking Tina over to the rental shop to get her squared away. I'll be back in a bit."

"Ok. Tina, have a great time. Make sure he takes you to lunch on top of the mountain."

"I'll do that, Julie. Thanks," replied Tina.

Sam escorted Tina out the glass doors near the operator and across a small plaza to a much taller building.

"I really like her, Sam. She's a hoot!"

Smiling Sam agreed. "She keeps me laughing. That's for sure, but assistants don't come any better than Julie."

As they crossed, Tina looked down the pedestrian corridor. It was lined with buildings that had a similar feel to the one she was approaching. Even though they were modern and new, their architecture looked over a hundred years old.

Slowing to look around, she said, "What a nice place. It's like I stepped back in time to an old village. Only it's not run down."

"Pretty cool, huh", said Sam. "The architect was trying to capture the old, western mining era of these mountains. I think he did a pretty good job".

"It's a great look. Are villages like this common at ski resorts?"

"Actually, there are a few out there with some others being built or planned, but all have a different feel depending on the local environment and history. The village in Mount Tremblanc fits right in to French Canada."

Once inside the rental shop, Sam had the shop manager take care of Tina for fitting and selection of equipment.

"I'm going to let John take care of fitting you and setting up your equipment. It'll take about 20 minutes or so. While you're doing that I'm going to go change into some ski clothes, check messages, and meet you back here."

About 25 minutes later they were standing in line at the Snowflake Lift. Tina was more than just a little nervous since it had been years since she had been on skis. The last experience with her ex-husband resulted in a disastrous weekend. They spent most of the time arguing...or not speaking to one another. He was bossy and pushy...trying to get her to ski on runs that were too steep for her. Now, here she was trying to rekindle a relationship with Sam who made his living running a ski resort.

So far, so good. She had been able to step into her skis and shuffle through the line without looking too incompetent. At least, she thought she looked in control. They were next in line. "Here comes the first test", she thought. Sam reached over and held her elbow.

"Get ready." He pointed to a red board on the snow right under the chair line. "When you're on that loading board, look behind you and grab the chair. Let's go," he said.

With that, she shuffled onto the loading spot with Sam guiding her by the elbow. The chair eased in position and she sat down when Sam did. It was easier than she remembered. The chair slowly picked up speed and in an instant they were quickly lifted up and away.

"I don't remember chairs loading that slowly and easily," she commented as they sped over the skiers below. "I seemed to remember them banging into the back of my legs."

"You may not have ridden a detachable lift before. Look up there", he said pointing to where the chair frame gripped the cable. "That mechanism is called the grip. As the chair approaches the loading station, it detaches from the cable. The cable is still spinning quickly, but the chair slows down onto a separate track. This allows us to load more easily. Then the chair speeds up to the same speed as the cable and once again grabs it. Fixed grip chairs never detach from the cable. So they travel through the loading area at the same speed as the cable. Even though fixed lifts travel slower than detachable lifts, the actual chair comes through faster. It's usually more of a jolt to get on."

Riding a chairlift never failed to give Sam a surge of excitement, much like paddling out for the first wave used to give him. It wasn't only the anticipation of another run down the mountain. He enjoyed the quiet time riding above the earth at treetop level looking at the scenery from a bird's eye view. With Tina next to him, his usual excitement reached new heights. He hadn't yet figured out why she was here, but it couldn't be by sheer accident. One didn't just show up in Durango, Colorado without planning. He had been one of the exceptions. He couldn't quite believe that she came to see him. The thought was almost preposterous considering how strongly she felt when they broke up all of those years ago.

He had been in an out of relationships in past years...none of them serious. Lynda had become a very good friend since his arrival in Durango. They had spent a lot of time together in the last year and a half. He was incredibly comfortable with her and cared about her a great deal, but the age difference continued to bother him. Well, maybe it was her desire to have more kids. He wasn't really leading her on, but the thought of not seeing Lynda anymore was too much for him. He didn't really date anyone else in town. In fact, most of his dates with Lynda were considered "just friendly" by most of the locals that knew them. He never asked Lynda if she was seeing anyone else and she never mentioned anyone else.

Sam refocused his thoughts on Tina. "Let's try a nice, easy trail so you can get your ski legs back," suggested Sam.

"That sounds good to me," agreed Tina.

As they exited the chair, Sam pointed off to the right at a green trail sign with the name "Schoolmarm" on it. She was relieved to see the big green circle signifying 'easy'. Ron wouldn't have been as thoughtful, she thought. It was a gentle trail...perfect for her first run. Leave it to Sam to suggest it. Slowly linking turns down the hill she remembered their first ski trip so many years ago. Sam had been so patient with her...never forcing her to try any run that was too steep for her. His encouragement had always helped to bolster her skiing ability.

Sam skied up alongside of her. "You're looking great, Tina! Very smooth. You must have been skiing quite a bit over the years."

She smiled to herself at his comment. "Thanks! I don't feel that smooth."

She came to a gentle stop after skiing about 150 yards from the beginning of the run. Sam skidded to right below her.

"Nonsense. Look back up the slope at your tracks," he said while pointing a ski pole up the hill.

Sure enough, there in the fresh laden snow she could see her tracks winding her way back up the slope. They looked like giant S's.

"They don't look too bad. Do they?" asked Sam.

Smiling at Sam, "No, I guess not," she said, kind of astonished.

"You sound kind of surprised."

"Actually, I'm a little nervous."

"Nothing to be nervous about. Shall we try some more."

"Yeah, let's."

Tina pushed off again, and Sam followed staying about 5-10 yards behind her. She was feeling cautious, but good about the way she was skiing so far. The snow was light, very light. It was like skiing through a shallow layer of whipped cream. There was no sound of scraping edges against hard snow. Only a soft sound of moving through snow could be heard. She didn't remember ever skiing with this sensation before.

After about another 300 yards from where they first stopped, her thigh muscles started to burn. She pulled up again to rest.

Pulling up alongside, Sam asked. "How long did you say it was since the last time you skied?"

Looking off onto the distant peaks, "I think about five years ago. I went to Big Bear with my ex. I didn't ski very well that trip...and had a lousy time."

Sam let a couple seconds pass realizing she was breathing hard. He looked into the distance at the peaks that she was gazing upon.

"They're called the Needle Mountains. Beautiful aren't they?"

"Yes, they are," she nodded in agreement.

"If we're here late enough today, you'll be able to see how they change color as the afternoon fades into evening. They turn red as the sun goes down and slowly to purple as the sun disappears over the horizon. It's called alpenglow."

"It sounds lovely." She turned back to Sam. "I look forward to seeing it, but right now...let's go!"

They skied _Schoolmarm_ one more time. After that, they tried another green run called _Homeward Bound_ , which they skied twice. By then, Tina was feeling pretty good. Her legs had really started to "burn" on the first run down "Homeward", but Sam suggested skiing through the fatigue. He explained that it was a build-up of lactic acid in the muscles. If she could continue, the muscle fatigue would go away. He was right. It was a struggle, but eventually the "burn" was gone and she got a new burst of energy in her legs.

After completing their second run down _Homeward Bound_ , they loaded onto another chair.

"I think I'm ready for a blue run," she told Sam.

Sam had his head tilted back slightly. His sunglasses were off and he had his eyes closed while taking advantage of the bright sunlight upon his face. "Just because you didn't fall on that run, you're feeling a little more confident, eh?"

Looking at him with a grin, she said, "I am. Are you up to the challenge?"

Opening his eyes he looked at her. "Oh, I'll try and keep up with you," he said smiling.

_Air Mail_ was one of Sam's favorite runs for a couple of reasons. The first was because it was rarely busy...probably because it was between the "front" of the mountain and the "back" of the mountain. It was what he liked to call a gentle cruiser...just steep enough here and there to classify it as a blue run. The second reason he liked it was because of the undulations in the terrain. When he knew there was no one on the run, he could let the skis run and get air off of these pitches.

When they entered the trail, it was apparent that no one had been on it yet. The run was a groomed stretch of perfect corduroy. Sam smiled to himself when seeing this. It always amazed him how often this trail was overlooked. Oh well, Tina would surely love the way the groomed snow felt on this run. There could be no better choice for her first blue trail.

Tina enjoyed _Air Mail_ all right, and was quick to suggest skiing it again upon reaching the chair at the bottom. She had been getting a little faster as the day went on, but more importantly she was skiing smoother. Her last fall was on the second run of the day and since then she hadn't come close to falling. The groomed corduroy made skiing effortless, and she couldn't wait to get to the top.

"I hope we can get to the top before anyone else skis down that trail. That was just incredible."

"You liked that, huh?" asked Sam.

"It was fabulous."

"It is hard to beat that run when the snow is groomed like that...isn't it?"

By the time they finished another run, she was ready for lunch. Instead of taking her back down to the village, Sam did choose the _Alpenhof_ restaurant as Julie suggested. It was a beautiful, mountaintop restaurant built the first summer Sam had come to Paradise Valley. The dining room was truly spectacular with 180-degree views of the San Juan Mountains. Twelve-inch Douglas Fir logs were brought in from Canada and hand-hewn on sight to construct the building. River rock from the local area was used throughout to trim out the restaurant. Inside, the dining room walls were a combination of pine and heavy textured stucco. Highlighting the room was a magnificent 25-foot rock fireplace.

As soon as Tina entered the restaurant she knew it wasn't your typical ski area restaurant. They were greeted by a hostess who directed them over to a sofa. Here they exchanged their ski boots for thick pile slippers. While they were feasting on lunch, their boots would be set on boot dryers to warm and dry them out.

"Hi, Sam. How is the skiing today?" asked, Dee, the hostess as they entered.

Smiling mischievously, he pointed a finger at her. "It's outstanding, Dee. I hope you get to enjoy it soon."

"I'm off tomorrow. Hope it's still good."

"It should be", he said.

After they had their slippers on, Sam and Tina were escorted to a window table near the fireplace. From that location, they were able to keep warm and have a sweeping view of the nearby mountains and the ski trails below. Tina was awed by the magnificence of the room. Its tall ceilings, big log beams, antler chandeliers, crystal glasses and table cloths weren't like anything she had seen before at ski areas. Within a minute, a waiter bearing two platters welcomed them: one had warm face towels, and the other contained some slices of cheese, crackers, and grapes.

"Hello, Sam...ma'am. How are you today?" asked the waiter while setting the food platter down.

"Hi, Bobby," said Sam.

"Fine, thank you," offered Tina.

"Would you like something to drink before you order?" asked Bobby.

Sam looked at Tina and opened his hands to her. "Soft drink, wine, beer?"

"What are you going to have?" she responded.

"Actually, I'm going to have a coke with a squeeze of lemon. The altitude dries you out fast. I'd recommend alcohol after you get off the mountain...less chance of altitude sickness."

She smiled at him. "Okay then." Turning to the waiter, "Do you have any flavored iced tea?"

"We have Arizona peach and raspberry tea," said Bobby.

"I'll have the peach, thanks."

Over the next hour or so they enjoyed a wonderful lunch starting with appetizers.

"The staff here seems to feel comfortable around you," said Tina as she started on her Caesar salad.

"I hope so. I've always tried to let staff know that I care about them and that they should feel comfortable talking with me. I learned that from someone very dear to me. I met him years ago. He worked alongside me when I needed help, listened when I spoke, and guided when I needed leadership. In fact, you know who that is because we both worked for him."

Looking at him questioningly, "Really. Who?"

"Bill Giannelli."

Tina broke out in a big smile, "He was such a sweet man. I loved working for him. I was so sad when he died."

"I didn't know that," commented Sam with a sad look on his face.

"About 4 years ago", said Tina. "The Lucky Strikes finally got him."

"Too bad. I always said that when I got into management I would try to live up to his example."

"I think he'd be proud, Sam. So, how did you end up here...at Paradise Valley?"

"Well, I came to Durango years ago on a motorcycle vacation the summer after I graduated and pretty much decided that I was going to move here one day. I had been at Killington, Vermont from 1989 to early 1993, which was very enjoyable. But, Mom and Dad were getting older, and my heart was in the high deserts and mountains of the west. So, I thought it was time to find some work or retire closer to them. I had no intention of staying in the ski business on a day to day basis. Through my years in the industry, I had developed a fairly broad network of contacts. So, I figured that I might do some consulting here and there. In reality, I was lucky that the money I made in real estate gave me the option of semi-retiring. I was actually looking forward to that. Then, Allen Collins called."

"Who's Allen Collins?"

"Allen built Paradise Valley from nothing more than a dream. He started it in 1959 with one T-bar and a rope tow. There were a couple other ski areas within an hour's drive, but over the years they didn't last. Allen made Paradise Valley special. He taught his employees to care about the customers...to give them clean well-kept facilities, good food, and the best skiing experience this mountain could provide."

"What did he say when he called?" asked Tina.

Swallowing a sip of coke, Sam continued. "I met Allen at an industry convention about five years prior to him calling. We hit it off pretty well. You remember how I always enjoyed older people?'

"Yeah, you always did."

"Well, we had a couple of meals together and played golf in the tournament that weekend. Every year after that, we made it a point to get together at the convention and we also stayed in touch in between the conventions. Somewhere along the line I must have impressed him.

"During his call, he told me that he wanted to ease into retirement. He's into his 70's now and just didn't want to work as much anymore. He wanted to travel and spend more time with his family while he could still enjoy them. He only wanted to work a couple of days a week, but he didn't have anyone on staff with whom he felt comfortable leaving the day to day operations. So, he asked if I was interested in taking over for him. I didn't really want to lock myself into a position that was going to require a lot of time and be high profile. The hours are long in this industry, I had a lot of things I wanted to do, and I've never relished having to play the politician when you run a resort. If Allen weren't such a likeable guy and the fact that I admire him, I wouldn't be here. I decided to take the job with a few conditions, which I'm still kind of shocked he accepted."

"What were they?"

"I wanted to work a reduced schedule, help get someone trained to eventually take over, and any major public relations would have to be handled by Allen."

The entrees were presented by Bobby. Sam had wild boar and rice pilaf with steamed veggies, while Tina had a halibut filet and roasted red potatoes.

Sam decided that he had been talking enough and tried to shift the conversation. Unfortunately, by now Tina was very interested in Sam's story. She had known this guy when he was young with no clear direction on life. Here, he was now...a secure and respected businessman. He had come so far.

"Did you find someone to take over for you and Allen?" she asked.

"I think I did. His name is Jason, a young capable guy who worked for me in Vermont. The thing I like about him more than anything...he's very calm, rational and doesn't come off aggressive. You know...I've been talking a lot about me. What about you?"

It was a great setting for two people to get re-acquainted after so many years. The table was set with a deep, wine colored linen cloth. A small flower vase with a rose sat on the corner next to a single candle. Their meals were wonderful, the atmosphere casually elegant. Through the huge windows, the snow-capped Rocky Mountains unfolded before them and into the horizon.

With slight trepidation, Tina smiled and looked into Sam's eyes. "What do you want to know?"

Her eyes were as mesmerizing as ever. As he looked into them, he realized that she had the same effect on him as she did so many years ago. He knew what he wanted to ask. She just gave him the opening, but it wasn't the time...not yet.

"Tell me more about your mom?" he asked. It was a safe question. The last thing he wanted to do was spoil the moment. It was the perfect topic to get through lunch. When he asked it, Tina breathed an inward sigh of relief.

When they finally got back on the snow, they were both feeling a little full from the big meal. Tina's legs had stiffened up primarily from not skiing in the last few years. By the time they took another 3 runs, she was feeling quite done for the day. So, they headed back down into the village. As they came over a rise, the village stood low in the foreground with the Needle Mountains beyond to the east. The peaks were awash in orange from the low afternoon sun behind their backs.

Quickly, Tina skidded to a stop. As Sam stopped alongside her, Tina turned to him and pointed at the distant peaks, "That is so beautiful!"

"Amazing, isn't it? Ever since the first time I saw them years ago, I've been captivated by them. The Alpenglow will go from that orange to burnt red and then to purple. What's really cool is when there is a moon. It will rise above the peaks."

It was all Tina could do to make it back to the base of the village. By then her legs were like rubber. Now she really knew what Sam referred to as "lubber legs". It brought a slight smile to her face. He always had these crazy nicknames for things.

"Didn't you complain about lubber arms when you surfed all day?"

"Yeah, after a while they just wouldn't work. I'd try to paddle, but it felt like nothing was happening. I can't remember if Jay came up with that word or me."

"How about Jay and Debbie. You know that they've been married for about 15 years now," asked Tina?

"Yeah, and they were friends for years before they got married. I hear from him quite often. He seems to be very happy with Debbie in Hawaii. I've lost track of how many kids they have."

"They just had their fourth two years ago...finally a boy."

"Oh, that's right. Jay did say that they had all girls and were hoping this was a boy."

Tina was so happy for Debbie. She remained her dearest friend even though she hadn't seen her in a few years. The distance over the ocean was not real convenient. She envied Debbie's family. Tina always wanted more kids.

They walked over to Sam's office where they both hung up their skis. It was then that she noticed her street shoes were just below the rack off to the side. She had left them in the rental shop.

"Why don't you put on your street shoes. I'm going to check with Julie to see if there are any messages," said Sam walking out into the hallway.

Tina just finished taking off her ski boots and zipping up her walking boots when Sam walked in carrying his ski boots. He had already changed. He placed a couple of notes on his keyboard.

"I took the liberty of making dinner arrangements. I hope you didn't have any?" he asked.

Smiling at him, she said, "No, not at all. I did come to see you. I'd hate to think you'd make me eat dinner alone tonight."

"I doubt if you would end up eating alone. The single men outnumber the women in this town four to one...maybe five to one."

"Don't believe him, Tina," said Julie loudly from the next room. "It's more like six to one."

Sam chuckled. "You're probably right, Julie" he responded over his shoulder.

"Of course, I'm right."

Tina grinned, "That sounds like pretty good odds to me, but I'll stick with you...at least tonight".

Sam winked at her and grabbed his coat off the rack. Leaving his office they walked by Julie.

As they said their goodnights, Julie said, "Enjoy your dinner tonight. Don't worry about coming in tomorrow, Sam." Julie smiled at them. "Jason can handle it."

"Did you have Julie make the reservations for you?" asked Tina.

"I didn't have time today. I was out entertaining." He smiled at her while putting on his cowboy hat.

It was a little after five when Sam dropped Tina at the hotel. "By the way, casual clothes tonight. I'm wearing jeans", he said as he watched the elevator door close.

* * *

Durango was a small out-of-the way resort town, but wasn't short on good dining. Sam was originally thinking about taking Tina to the Crystal Station. It was a fine-dining restaurant near the train station...one of a few 4-star restaurants in the area. At the last minute, he changed his mind and had Julie call the Opera House. Thinking it was best to keep things light, he chose the local dinner theatre in the heart of Rio Grande Land on Main next to the Strater Hotel. It specialized in comedies, which were usually pretty good.

Twenty minutes into the show, he knew that he had made the right choice. The theatre was about ¾ full...not bad for mid-January. The cast was really on tonight, keeping the audience in laughter. It was evident that Tina was having a good time along with everyone else.

Sam never worried about the service at the Opera House, but the food could sometimes be questionable. However, the gamble paid off tonight. Not only was the show good, but their meals were tasty, as well.

Exiting a couple hours later, Tina was commenting on how her cheeks hurt from laughing so much. Sam nodded in agreement.

They were standing on the sidewalk just outside the Opera House taking in the "passing parade" on the street. The crowd was emptying out...most of them commenting on how much they enjoyed the show. The storefronts were lit with bright window displays. White lights were twinkling in the trees up and down the street. The night was beautifully clear.

"It feels a little colder than last night," said Tina as she slightly shivered.

Pointing up at the dark sky, Sam said," That's what happens when the clouds clear out. It's kind of like taking a lid off of a pot of water. The water gets colder when the top is off."

She looked up at the star-filled sky for a couple of seconds and then looked back at Sam. "I forgot how the stars look in the mountains. Takes your breath away."

"I know it's probably been a long day for you, but would you be interested in a nightcap?" Sam asked.

She was tired and could use a good night's sleep. But she had no intention of saying goodnight, yet. "I could maybe go for one," she smiled.

Sam pointed down the street aways to a second story window. "You see that second floor window sticking out over the sidewalk? Let's go over there. It's a nice quiet bar where we can talk...sometimes there's a piano player."

She looked at him warmly, "Sounds good to me."

The Eagle's Nest wasn't a large place, about twenty feet wide by forty feet long. There were about dozen people inside. It was a typical size crowd for mid-week. The piano sat empty at the end of the room opposite the windows. The bar stretched across the long wall opposite the stairs. Sinatra was singing a saloon song over the sound system.

The bartender waved from behind the bar at Sam. Waving back to him, Sam guided Tina to the window seat. As luck would have it, it was empty tonight...an occurrence that didn't happen all that often. The window was half of an octagon that hung out over the street below by about 4 feet. There were two seats opposing each other made with soft, leather upholstery. It made for a cozy place to watch the happenings on Main Avenue below.

This was one of Sam's favorite places to relax with a drink, with or without company. He discovered it early in his life in Durango when he didn't know many people. The bartender, who went by the name of Rip, befriended Sam immediately. Since then, Sam made the Eagle's Nest a regular stopping point to end an evening out.

Rip's real name was actually Arthur, which he never liked. He went by Art for years until his first year of college. He had decided to take a break after his first semester to "find" himself by taking a cross-country bicycle trip that eventually covered over 6,000 miles. When he returned a year later to his hometown of Philadelphia, he was fit and lean, deeply tanned, with hair past his shoulders, and a very long beard. As soon as his roommate saw him they hung the nickname Rip on him. "My God, you've been gone a long time. You look like Rip Van Winkle with that hair and beard," he said. So, it was Rip ever since.

Sam and Tina barely had time to get comfortable before Rip came over from behind the bar. Extending a hand to Sam he asked, "How are you doing tonight, Sam?" To Tina, he nodded and said, "Maam, how are you?"

Shaking Rip's hand in return, Sam said, "Rip, this is a dear old friend of mine, Tina."

Tina turned to Sam and jabbed him with an elbow. "Excuse me," she said with smile. "What do you mean...old?"

Grinning, Sam tried to clarify the statement. "I mean a friend that I've known from long ago." He looked at Tina and chuckled, "You know I didn't mean that you were that old."

She was having fun with Sam. "I didn't think you meant that, but I did want to make sure. Hi, Rip. How are you tonight?"

"Very good, Tina. It's nice to meet you. How long have you known this guy?" Rip asked while extending a thumb toward Sam.

Turning to Sam, she smiled and looked back at Rip. "It seems like from another lifetime...most of it good."

"Really?" commented Sam looking at Tina.

Turning to Sam, "We'll talk about that later. Right now I think Rip probably wants to take our order."

"If you're ready?" asked Rip.

"What are you going to have, Sam?" asked Tina.

"I think I'll finish the night with some Anisette."

"Hmm, I think I'll have a Kahlua and cream on the rocks," said Tina.

After Rip walked away, Tina asked Sam, "Isn't Anisette licorice flavored? I never thought about drinking that."

"Another piece of the good life that I learned from Gio. He got me hooked on Anisette as an after dinner drink, a dessert thing when we went to Italy."

"Really? When did you go there?"

"I think it was 1983. Had a great time. We visited his home town, Varazze. It's a beautiful city along the Italian Riviera. Picture a post card setting with hills above an Italian city terraced alongside the edge of the blue Mediterranean. Sprinkle hundreds of neatly positioned and different colored umbrellas on the beach and you have...Varazze. He showed me his old home. We looked up his parents' graves in this beautiful cemetery on a hillside just off the sea. And we went to mass at his old parish church, _Saint Ambrogio_. The town was spectacular...and it actually had reasonable surf."

Rip was back with the drinks in short order, and Sam and Tina settled into the window seat quite comfortably. She slipped off her big boots that she had been clomping around in all evening. They didn't fit too well and her feet were kind of cold. So, she curled her legs up underneath her on the window seat hoping to warm her feet.

They were sitting side by side barely touching each other. Not much was being said. Nothing really had to be said. The bar had a nice, warm atmosphere to it. The day had been full. The dinner and show had been loud with laughter. Winding down the evening in the calm above the people on the street, listening to saloon ballads didn't require a lot of conversation.

"Did you surf in Italy?"

"No, I didn't get a chance, but I sure thought about it."

"When was the last time you were on a board?"

"Oh, it's been years...maybe 10. It was in Kauai with Jay...a couple of years after he and Debbie moved there. Jay bought a surf shop in old Koloa town that rents all kinds of water equipment." Sam smiled. "He renamed it _Oldies_ for the "old" dudes that still surf. I think he has a good reputation on the island."

"Sounds like you had a good time?"

"Had a great time. There are times when I miss not being close to the ocean and being able to surf."

"Well, maybe you'll do it again soon. Perhaps the next time you visit your parents."

"Maybe," agreed Sam wistfully. He often thought about the beach, "After all those years with sand between my toes, I guess it's hard to not miss it."

Here and there Sam and Tina commented on people walking by down below, or about one of the songs. The Sinatra CD set the perfect mood. By and large, they were just enjoying the moment. They had been together most of the day, but it wasn't until now they started to relax into each other's space. Skiing was more of an outing or activity that helped break the ice of that first day. They shared the excitement of skiing together again. Dinner really didn't provide any quality private time. But now, there were no distractions. The Eagle's Nest was known for the place to go for a private drink.

Looking out the window, Sam started to speak. "I don't know what ever possessed you to come out here..." he turned and smiled to her "...but I'm glad you did."

"Me, too. I was very nervous about it...probably still am a little. It was a good thing they served liquor on the plane because the closer we got the more anxious I got. But, here you are...being incredibly nice and helpful...considering I just fell out of the sky. I'm just glad I didn't find you keeping house with a woman. That would have made for an unhappy trip."

"Unhappy?"

"Yeah," she smiled. "Unhappy. I came to see you alone."

"Well, here I am...alone." Lynda flashed in his mind. What a coincidence that she always took Siera to Phoenix this time of year after Christmas to visit her old In-laws. She always wanted to keep Siera close to Lou's parents since his death.

Tina thought. _Did she dare get personal? What the hell?_ She had been in town 24 hours, and half of that time she'd spent with Sam. Besides, that's why she came.

"How come you are alone, Sam?"

There it was, the first personal moment between them. What was he going to say?

Tina continued, "You look great. You're successful. More importantly, you're sweet and not a jerk. What happened to you after we split up?"

He looked at her and raised his eyebrows. "I don't know," he said shaking his head. Turning his head back to the window, he slowly traced his index finger around the rim of his glass. Did he want to relive the old pain he tried nearly 18 years to bury?

"I didn't recover very well after...losing you. It took me two years before I got the nerve to ask another girl out. I was a wreck. Finally, I started dating if you can call it that. I eventually came across some really nice girls. Spent some steady time with about three of them over the years."

He looked like his thoughts had carried him away from the seat next to her, thought Tina. He was looking far off down the street now in a blank stare.

"I lived with a couple of 'em for a short period, but nothing permanent came of it. Marriage always came up, but somehow I never felt...worthy for lack of a better word."

_Did it scar him more than she ever knew?_ Tina thought,

A trumpet blast from "Day and Night" shook Sam out of his trance. Sinatra continued. _"I think of you...Night and Day"_

Still looking out the window, a smile crossed Sam's face. _Should he tell her? Ah, what the hell. She'll probably laugh, too_.

"Just when I thought I was a confirmed bachelor, I took a week's trip to Martinique and came home married." He chuckled and looked back at Tina.

She had a smirk on her face. "I think I was drunk with lust after watching her walk around bare-breasted all week. What a disaster that marriage was," he said shaking his head.

"You got married to someone you didn't even know for a week?"

He was chuckling now. "Well, remember. It was one hell of a party all week in Martinique. It was late nights, lots of margaritas, and I wasn't used to babes walking around without their tops on the beach. Can you blame me?"

She was smiling now, "That's a wild story. Well, you always were a boob man. What did your parents say?"

"They were both shocked and disappointed. She never did fit in with the family. We spent most of the time fighting." Turning back to the street he continued, "Lucky for me, she went back home to Florida a few months later."

Sam turned back to Tina, "Moving around so much probably hasn't helped. I have some really nice female friends now, and one that I'm close to. But, there's quite an age difference so I don't know where that's going."

He paused. She waited.

"She wants more kids..." Shaking his head, "but I don't know. Luckily, work has been so full and enjoyable. I have a lot of interests that keep me busy outside of work..." he turned his head to look at her "...which is why I am looking forward to partially retiring."

She wanted to hear more about the women in his life...especially this younger one, but it could wait. "That's sounds so weird when you talk about retiring."

"Yeah, it does sound weird, but I like the sound of it.

"What are you going to do with your time?"

"You know I've known and heard people talk about how lost they'd be retiring. That always sounded strange to me. I'm thinking I still wouldn't have enough time. There is so much I want to do."

"Like what? Tell me."

"Where to begin...I love to build things. In fact, I just finished up my house."

"Mom mentioned that. In fact, I think she was proud of you. She reminded me of how you used to borrow my dad's architecture books."

"Like I said last night, he did help me a lot."

"How much work have you done on the house yourself?"

"Quite a bit actually. I've started to make furniture, too. Right now, I'm designing a sofa made from burl wood. I don't know if you've ever seen it, but it's twisted and tortured looking...probably from the harsh environment it comes from in the Wyoming basin. It makes beautiful furniture after it is sanded and oiled."

He paused for a drink, watching the people in the street below.

So many years ago they split up. Tina remembered the heartbreak she felt when he went away to college. They were engaged so young, but so much in love. She couldn't understand how he wanted to go away to school and leave her behind. When she went to visit him in San Luis Obispo to give him the news, and then walked in on him kissing some strange girl...her heart was crushed. Sam tried to make excuses, but she refused to go back to him...partially hurt and feeling betrayed. She even remembered dating other guys at the store just to piss him off. She hurt him in return and knew it. Tina felt sick about it most of the time, but couldn't bring herself to admit that she should have made up with Sam. She moved to Kansas City shortly thereafter to be with her sister and start fresh.

And now here she was...sitting next to Sam again. How many years since she saw him last? About 15 years ago at the market while she was working. Now she was approaching forty and wondering why she ever let Sam go. It wasn't that he looked years younger than anyone she knew. Here was this guy who not only was sensitive and thoughtful, but had talent and so many interests. She had met many guys over the years...before, during, and after her marriage that were selfish or macho. Some whose primary interest was how many ball games they could watch on TV in one day or how much golf they could play.

Tina smiled at him and touched his hand. "Do I get to see this house of yours?"

Sam knew that there was a good chance that Tina would want to see his home. It was only natural. That didn't bother him. He was very proud of his home, and loved showing it to friends. He just didn't want to get into any kind of an awkward position with Tina alone there, and jeopardize the good times they were sharing once again. Time often heals most wounds. He knew how deep his scar was. He didn't know how deep hers ran.

Raising his hand and pointing his finger at her with a smile, "I'd love to show you my home. It's my pride and joy. I tell you what. How about if we ski till about one o'clock tomorrow and then we'll head to my house for dinner?"

"That'd be great." Just then she couldn't help herself and Tina yawned. "My legs will probably appreciate the shorter day."

As Tina yawned, Sam said "Looks like we ought to take you back to the Strater."

"You're probably right. I'd like to stay up, but I don't seem to be winning the battle."

Goodnights were exchanged with Rip, and Sam escorted Tina downstairs and across the street. It was around 10:30 pm, but Durango was lively. The sounds coming from the bars indicated that the night was far from over for many people. They passed one nightclub and looking through the windows they could see that it was packed wall to wall with people. It was a typical night in ski season.

The Strater's lobby had a couple of people sitting here and there. The Diamond Belle Saloon was as noisy as ever. Sam slowed down inside the lobby approaching the elevator. It had just opened up. He had no intention of following her up to her floor.

Turning to Tina he said, "Before I go, shall I pick you up after or before breakfast?"

Looking at him with her piercing blue eyes, she smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you at 8:00. This time I'll buy the coffee and rolls for the drive. Sweet dreams." With that she walked into the waiting elevator.

"Good night," he said.

She waved at him just as the doors closed.

### Chapter 21

### Dinner at the Ranch

The day broke with clouds moving into the high country. As often is the case in the San Juans, a storm could blow in unexpectedly. Initially, the eastern sky began as a faint pink glow on the scattered clouds. By the time the sun had been up a couple of hours, the clouds were solid. Before lunch would be over, snow would be falling.

Sam and Tina were on the road as planned by 8:00 am. True to her word, she had gotten up early enough to grab coffee and some rolls from the New York Bakery just down the street from the Strater.

Deciding to show Tina another way to the ski area, Sam took East Animas Rd towards the ski area. It was a little slower going, but worth the extra 15 minutes. The 2-lane road meandered up the east side of the Animas Valley along the base of Montezuma Ridge. It was one of Sam's favorite roads to drive, and he enjoyed showing it to Tina. He pointed out the Bar-D Chuckwagon, which was a very popular summer attraction. The wranglers served a BBQ steak dinner and then performed a variety of western songs all out under the stars. The road skirted several old ranch houses that used to be the center of the big ranches from times past. Now, these ranches had mostly been sold off piece meal over the years. There were still plenty of meadows and forests, but they were now dotted with the occasional house or "trophy" vacation home. Still, subdividing the ranches was the only way for many of the original ranch families to stay on. In many instances, the profits from their land sales were more than years spent in the ranching business.

They arrived at the ski area around 9:00 am, and were on their first chair ride by 9:30. The morning was spent getting Tina more familiar with her skiing ability and the mountain. In order to keep from getting bored, Sam mixed the runs up between long, gentle cruisers, and a couple of shorter, steep runs. That's all it took, however, for Tina's thighs to start burning. Staying up late the night before after skiing all day didn't help much either. Sam gently nudged Tina into skiing through the "burn". After what seemed forever, Tina broke through the fatigue and amazingly picked up the pace.

"I never knew about that "burn" thing before. Normally, I just would have quit", she said.

Sam nodded. "It's pretty cool once you get beyond it. Even now, I have to force myself...and I know about it."

From then on, she skied the blue runs quite smoothly.

By 11:30 am the sky became a low ceiling of clouds and the temperature was beginning to drop. When the first flakes started to fall on their way up a chair, Sam noticed that Tina was hunching her shoulders a bit.

"You a little cold?" he asked.

"I am getting chilled."

Reaching into his fanny pack he pulled out a fleece hat. "Here, put this on. It will help out."

"Oh, thanks. I forgot mine."

At the top of the chair he suggested going in for a cup of hot chocolate or soup to warm up. It was just the thing Tina needed. She was starting to feel a little worn down...must have been from the travel, altitude, and the strange exercise of skiing all catching up with her. Once again they headed over to the _Alpenglow_ restaurant.

"How's the shrimp bisque?" Sam asked Tina.

Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, Tina said "Wonderfully warm. I didn't realize how tired and cold I was until I sat down and started eating."

"You know there is no reason why we need to beat you up today on the slopes. Why don't we call it a day, and go back to town? We can pick up a change of clothes for you and go to my house. It'd give me the opportunity to show you around my little ranch."

"That sounds pretty good," agreed Tina.

* * *

Not wanting to infringe upon Tina's space at the Strater, Sam said, "I'll wait here in the lobby."

"Don't be silly," said Tina. "Come on up."

The elevator was very slow as Sam had remembered from other occasions being in the Strater. It reminded him why he always used the stairs. Tina's room was as Sam expected...small, but very nicely decorated in old Victorian furniture. There was a beautiful, rosewood four poster bed that took up most of the room. Off to the side, next to the window there were a couple of straight backed chairs. He sat down in one of them while Tina excused herself into the bathroom to wash up and brush her teeth.

Just kind of gazing around, Sam said, "It's amazing to me that this building is so old and still in good shape. Think about all of the people that have come and gone in this room over the years. Some were probably just your average people from Tulsa or Dallas, but others might have been very famous people."

"What should I bring?" she asked as she opened the door.

"Well, I want to show you around outside a bit...so keep your ski clothes on. They'll keep you warm. Bring along something comfortable to wear around the house for dinner, and maybe watching a movie. You didn't happen to bring a bathing suit, did you?"

"Yeah, I did. Why?" Tina started opening the drawers of the bureau at the foot of the bed.

"I've got a Jacuzzi outside. You never know. It might be just the thing to take the aches away before dinner."

She turned around holding jeans and a sweater and smiled at him. "A Jacuzzi might feel pretty good, but I don't know if I'm ready for you to see me in a bathing suit just yet."

He got up from the chair and headed for the door. He placed his hand on the knob and turning his head back towards her. "Bring it anyway." Then he winked, "I won't laugh if you don't."

* * *

Sam lived west of town about 9 miles out. By pure luck he had come across this 40-acre parcel of land. He was at the Olde Tymers' Cafe having a burger for lunch one day when he overheard a conversation about a tax lien sale. It seemed one of the old families of Durango had originally settled a 640-acre ranch near Wildcat Canyon. The lone surviving member of the family was a burned out old hippy that squandered away the family fortune. Parcel by parcel he had sold the land to pay for a drug abuse problem. The only thing he had left of the beautiful ranch was 40 acres. Tragically, he overdosed one night a couple of months ago and left the land behind with 2 years of unpaid taxes.

Sam immediately went to his realtor friend and asked him what he knew about the old Wyman ranch. The realtor had told him that it was some of the prettiest land in the county. "It was unfortunate that bum of a great-grandson sold if off piece-meal. Luckily, he kept 40 acres intact."

"Why is that so important?" asked Sam.

"It has to do with old water right laws. Water has always been an important commodity in the west...more gun wars started over water than over gold or silver. In Colorado if you have 35 acres, you can still irrigate your land from a well for livestock and pasture. Anything less than 35 acres and you're limited to water for your dwelling only."

Sight unseen, Sam drove to the county clerk and wrote a check for the taxes on the 40-acre parcel. That evening he drove out to his "new spread" and watched the sun set over the far-west horizon. He fell in love with the place immediately, and knew that was where he was going to make his home for a long time.

The shape of the land was almost an elongated rectangle with a bulge at one end. The parcel ran lengthwise along the road. The front of the property alongside the road was for the most part flat and perfect for pasture, not that Sam had any horses. It was dotted with cedar and scrub oak. That flat section made up about a third of the property. From there, the land started to rise to about 50 feet above the pasture onto a plateau of ponderosa pines. This made up most of the remaining property. From the road, the property to the right was Bureau of Land Management (BLM), which meant that no one would be settling on that piece. To the left was another 40-acre parcel that was occupied with a second home of a retired baseball player out of St. Louis. Sam's plateau was higher than either of these two parcels. The back of Sam's parcel, which was northwest, fell off into a deep canyon. As a result, Sam essentially had views in all directions and they were incredible...at least to Sam.

By the time Tina and Sam got into the car, it was about 1:30 pm. The snow that had been falling quite steadily up at the ski area was now starting to flake lightly in town.

"All this time and I can't believe you haven't told me much about where you live. How far out of town is your house?"

"It's about a 15 minute drive...maybe ten miles that way," he said while pointing to the west.

"What's your neighborhood like?"

"Well, it's not really a neighborhood. My closest neighbor is about 400 yards away."

"400 hundred yards? Don't you feel alone?" Sam remembered that Tina had always lived in the suburbs. He had lived away from them so long that he was used to the bigger space of the mountains. It would be interesting to see how she liked his home considering its location.

"Just enough to feel at peace. Don't get me wrong my neighbors are very nice people and we do visit, but it's nice not to have your neighbor 10 feet away from your back door. I don't know if I could live like that anymore. In fact, when I visit mom and dad it gives me a bit of claustrophobia when I look out their window to see the neighbors' house."

Sam noticed that Tina was looking at him a bit quizzically.

He winked at her and said, "The open space grows on you."

As they entered Wildcat Canyon, Tina commented how the area didn't quite look the same as Durango, or near the ski area. In contrast it looked a little more open. Many of the trees weren't as large and the forest wasn't as dense. Distances became more apparent.

"As you move west and south of town, the vegetation becomes drier. We're actually not that far from the deserts of northern New Mexico and Arizona. If you go about 30 miles south of here, it looks like a different world," explained Sam. "Do you remember those old John Wayne westerns set in Monument Valley?"

"You mean the ones in the desert with those big, red rock formations?"

"That's right. Those were filmed about two hours from here. Well, there are some monuments a lot closer to here just to the south." Sam gestured with his hand. "Because we are close to the high desert, the landscape out here flattens out a little bit and the forest gets a little sparser and dryer."

By the time they neared Sam's place, they traveled up a rise and onto a plateau of sorts.

Tina commented, "Wow, you can really see far away from here."

"Wait until you see the view from up there," as Sam pointed to the hill where his house was located.

"Your gateway is beautiful," said Tina as they passed through the driveway entry to Sam's house.

The entry was made up of three vertical peeled logs on each side of the driveway strapped together. The tallest on each side stood about 12 feet high. The adjoining logs were 2 feet shorter than the next. They were clear sealed and set in a 3 foot high wall of river rock.

"Thanks. Thought of that a couple of years ago."

As Sam turned up the winding, gravel driveway Tina got a glimpse of the house. Ponderosa pine mostly obscured it at this point, but the rooftop could be seen from above the trees.

It was by no means a big, fancy house, but it was a very comfortable one. Sam could never be accused of being pretentious. He fell in love with the old west years ago as a boy watching westerns and playing "Cowboys and Indians". This flopped over into his home. He liked modern conveniences, but preferred the look and feel of a ranch house. Maybe he just wanted the environment to match his home. He built it out of river rock and logs, with plenty of windows to take advantage of the views and to bring the outside indoors. He liked to think that it fit in perfectly with the surrounding mountains.

Pulling into the driveway, Sam stopped the car. "Why don't you get out here, and I'll take you through the front door instead of the utility room. Besides the front yard has a nice view."

While Sam pulled into the garage, Tina couldn't keep her eyes focused in any one place. The front of the house looked familiar in a way, but she couldn't figure out why. It had a nice, big porch below a couple of upstairs windows. When she wasn't looking at the house she was looking out over the yard...and beyond. The front yard had a few intermittent trees before the forest continued about 30 yards from the house. She noticed the snow wasn't as deep here as it was in town. The yard had islands of what looked to be flower planters and a variety of different shrubs. The ground outside the planters was primarily natural grasses...dormant given the time of year. A few large boulders half the size of a Volkswagen made the yard even more striking. The forest around the house wasn't particularly dense, which is why the house was partially visible from the road. However, from up here the views were largely over the trees...of distant ridges and valleys as far as the eye could see.

"Come on. Let's go in," said Sam as he made his way from the garage with Tina's bag.

"These are neat looking," she said pointing at the lights that were mounted on the sides of the porch walls. "They look like old lanterns. And this door, I've never seen one like this before."

Sam was proud of many individual things about his house. One of them was his front door. It was a heavy pine door, etched with southwest patterns. The wood inlays were slightly different shades and colors...deep blue-green, dark red, and burnt yellow. "Cool. Huh? Kind of has that southwest, American Indian look."

The door was off to the right of the porch. Tina really hadn't known what to expect when she stepped inside the house. The tiled entry had a beautiful old bureau to the right under the window, which looked out onto the front yard. Sam dropped his cowboy hat on top of the bureau upon entering. On the same wall were a couple of old hurricane lanterns. Facing directly opposite the front door were two doors that looked like smaller versions of barn doors. She soon found out it was a closet, when Sam asked for her jacket.

While the entry had an "old" feel to it, one look to the left brought a completely different feel. "Wow", she thought. The house opened up into a formal dining room. An antler chandelier hung above an oval, oak table surrounded by 6 chairs. On the wall to the right hung a lovely southwest Indian blanket. The room was a continuation of the same décor from the entry with more modernism. The adjoining kitchen, off to the left, was contemporary with granite counter tops. The reddish, clay tile floor was the same as the entry and dining room. From the entry she got a hint of what was beyond these two rooms.

"Those cabinets are lovely. What kind of wood is that?" Tina asked. She had never seen wood grain more striking or a kitchen with such gorgeous views. Out one window was the front yard and opposite, over the kitchen bar and beyond were mountains.

"It's hickory, my favorite wood for cabinets. It's the third time I've used it in a kitchen."

"This is your third house?"

"Yeah. I think I finally got it right this time."

"Well, it's a beautiful kitchen, Sam."

The greatroom looked to be thirty feet across with the far wall all being windows. As she moved through the dining room, she could see that the ceiling of the greatroom was still not visible and the wall of glass continued up. Finally, from the edge of the dining room she could see that the top windows ran almost to the peaked ceiling 25 feet above her. The window wall was even more striking because of the peaked angle in the middle. It kind of jutted outwards to the mountains beyond...away from the room. It was an awesome look. The side walls of the room were a mixture of rock and logs that gave it a rustic feel, but the design was more contemporary.

Even with all of the glass, the room felt warm. All of the colors came together...the Spanish tile floor, the hickory cabinets, the colored stone, and the logs...all earth tones of various shades and textures.

"This is a spectacular room, Sam. And those windows," as she pointed to the greatroom. "It's like living outdoors."

Sam was beaming inside, but showing only the slightest of grins. "Let me show you around a little."

They went from room to room. Sam proudly showing off the details of the home he spent meticulously building. Tina hadn't seen too many like it. Living in Southern California tract houses most of her life, she wasn't used to a house built like this. It was airy and bright. Every room having large windows. The textures of the walls were even different. They looked like layers of adobe each with slightly different colors rather than normal drywall. The light color blended perfectly with the rock and log. She noticed that even though it was a bachelor's house, it was very comfortable from a woman's point of view.

She assumed that Sam had decorated it himself, which made sense. He had always had a soft side to his masculinity. It was something she always loved about him. When there was a choice in the past between watching a macho, action movie or a romantic comedy with Cary Grant, Sam would always pick Cary Grant.

It was becoming more apparent as they toured the house that Sam had carved out a life here that he reveled in. She saw it in how he described why one window was built just so to take advantage of a particular view, or his pride in a piece of log furniture that he'd built. It reminded her of how excited he used to get describing how he'd built surfboards so many years ago. Her southern Californian beach boy had changed quite a bit. She could see that he fit in very comfortably in this faraway place. It made her think, _"Was he gone forever?"_

One of her favorite rooms was in the back of the walkout basement, which was below the greatroom. The basement, too, had a wall of glass. On first entering, it appeared to be just a large workout room with a TV and stereo. The back wall of mirrors kept the room from being dark. It was a door in the back corner that made her curious.

It was different in two respects. It was the only door in the house that was arched, and it had flat, horizontal bands of wrought iron secured across the vertical planks of wood. She was so surprised when Sam opened it. Upon opening, a couple of old-looking wrought iron framed lights flickered on the wall to the right. The filaments glowed like candles rather than bulbs, and lit up a table between them. The floor was made of cobblestones. The walls were heavily plastered like an old, Italian villa. Opposite the table to the left was a rack...probably holding a couple of hundred wine bottles. There was a counter in the back of the room with a sink and some equipment that Sam later described as wine-making "stuff". Back around the corner to the left was another set of racks and a glass door refrigerator with more bottles. Unlike the rest of the house, this room was cooler.

"This is really a unique room," Tina said beaming with pride in Sam. "What made you think of making a wine cellar like this? It so out of character from the rest of house?"

Smiling at her, "It was Gio. When we took that trip to Italy, we also toured around Tuscany. I really fell in love with that whole area...the beautiful rolling hills, and old villas. The people were marvelous. The cares of the world weren't important. It was family and friends, food, and wine that mattered most. While we were over there, I met a cousin of his who was a vintner. Massio was his name. His family had been growing grapes and olives and making wine for centuries. The tour he gave me of the vineyard was captivating. I make wine now from grape concentrate, but I've been promising myself for years to grow grapes. I've been reading to see if anyone has had any luck growing grapes at this altitude. Anyway, when I started designing the house...I knew I had to make my version of a Tuscan wine cellar. I don't know if I'll ever leave this place, but if I do...I'll build the next house to look entirely like a Tuscan villa."

"Well, the cellar came out wonderful. The whole house did. I'm just amazed at what you've done. I can see why you're so proud."

"Thanks. I do love it. So, are you still up for a soak in the Jacuzzi and a nice glass of wine with a little fruit and cheese?"

"I got to admit the Jacuzzi sounds good," she said with hesitation and squinting her nose. "You promise to only say good things about me in a bathing suit?"

She must be a little nervous thought Sam. She mentioned that again. Well, that makes sense. They hadn't seen each other in bathing suits in almost 20 years. He suspected he had more to worry about than her. From what he had seen over the last couple of days, Tina looked as shapely in clothes as she did when they were dating. "I promise."

"Okay."

Sam grabbed a bottle of Malvasia out of the refrigerator and they headed back upstairs. Dropping the wine on the kitchen counter, he took Tina upstairs to the guest room. Pointing to the door beyond the bed and to the right, he said, "There's a clean robe on the back of the bathroom door, and some sheepskin slippers in the closet. Put them on so you can stay warm outside until you get in the water."

By the time Tina returned Sam was already in his robe and cutting up cheese and apples in the kitchen.

"Oh, that looks good," as Tina grabbed a piece of cheese off the plate. _It sure does she thought as she saw his chest hair peeking out of his robe._ She always loved his chest hair showing. She smiled to herself. Those stupid turtlenecks he used to wear. She was so glad when she got him to start wearing V-neck sweaters. "Can I help with anything?"

Pointing he said, "Yeah, grab those two glasses and follow me".

"Oh, gawd is it getting cold out here," she exclaimed following him out to the tub.

"Don't worry you'll forget about the cold before you know it." Setting the fruit and cheese down near the edge of the water, he reached for the glasses. "Here, let me set those down, I've got an idea." Taking them from her, he set the glasses down. Looking at her, he started to smile. "Now, on the count of three we both take our robes off at the same time. That way we can both gawk. Fair enough?"

What a nice way to break the ice she thought. "I'll buy that."

Sam counted out to three. In a flash, both of their robes came off and they jumped into the hot, bubbling water before either could really gawk.

"Hey, I didn't get a chance to stare," joked Sam. "You're going to have to get out and do that again."

Tina splashed him with water. "Sorry. You had your chance. I can't help it if you didn't take it all in. I did."

It might have been a fleeting glimpse, but she was prepared for it. Looking at his calves below his robe in the kitchen sparked a bit of excitement at seeing Sam again in a bathing suit. It appeared that Sam had held up pretty well over the years. He had always been lean with good muscle tone.

"Well, I didn't realize you were going to jump into the water. You should have warned me," he said still playing along.

Fortunately for him, he was prepared as well and caught a quick glance of her as she jumped into the water. Her legs were still shapely and every once in a while he caught a glance of her cleavage when the bubbles were flying just the right way. Tina could still raise his heart rate.

After ten minutes in the Jacuzzi, Tina was feeling the ski muscles relax. It was either that, or the half a glass of wine she had consumed. It had been another day of happiness and she was really enjoying the soak in the warm water.

"This water is wonderful. It's like a soothing hot bath, and what a nice spot this is", she said.

The Jacuzzi was outside just off the kitchen deck. Sam had located it right up against three very large boulders forming a natural "cove" to protect the spot from the prevailing winds. From the open side there was an inspiring view of a canyon and across...the endless ridges of mountains. She could almost feel like she was the only inhabitant for hundreds of miles. The storm that had started up at the ski area had stayed to the north, while here it was mostly scattered clouds. The western sky was starting to glow in reds and orange as if it was on fire from the impending sunset.

"I love sitting out here on the deck and playing my guitar, or drinking a cup of coffee or glass of wine and watching the evening fade away", said Sam as he was gazing into the distant peaks.

Turning towards her, "Well, what do you think? Was it worth coming out and looking up an old friend?"

Aside from the kiss when they first saw each other at the bar, there hadn't been much physical contact. If there was, it was informal. She reached her arm out of the water and touched him lightly on the cheek for a moment.

Smiling at him she said tenderly, "Very much".

She couldn't remember the last time that she had spent the better part of two days with a man and enjoyed it as much. She was exhilarated by not only seeing Sam again, but also because of the skiing and being in a place so different than the life she had known for so long. Granted there was a lot of small talk, mixed in with catching up on old times...not a lot of personal stuff. But, they had many laughs, which she desperately needed and hadn't had in a while. She knew the serious talk would come soon. It had to.

He turned to face her a little more directly. "You haven't told me a thing about what happened to you and Ron."

"Ron can wait. I'd rather talk about you."

"I've been doing that", he said with a chuckle.

"Well, I've got a lot of years to catch up on and I came to see you...so I set the rules."

"Really! I didn't know that," said Sam sarcastically.

"Yes, really", she said with smile. The wine was making her braver. "You've told me about your work." She was a bit apprehensive. "What else happened to you after we broke up, Sam?"

"That was so long ago," he said slightly shaking his head and looking into the water.

Did he really want to talk about that time in their lives? Sam never had any idea how much it must have hurt Tina. He only knew the pain he inflicted upon himself. From all indications after they split up, she didn't appear bothered at all. She dated and went out with her friends as if nothing happened. Then, she moved to Kansas City and he didn't see her again for years except once, only briefly at the store.

It was always so easy for girls, he thought...all they had to do was decide whether to say yes or no to some poor guy. He always wondered about her true feelings. After all, they were crazy about each other, and breaking up was devastating to him. Could it have been that inconsequential to her?

"Oh, come on. You owe it to me," she said stretching out her hand and touching his arm.

He looked at her quizzically. She was always so cute at getting her way in an unselfish manner. With a hint of a smile, "I do? How do you figure?"

Tina looked at her wine glass for a moment. Turning slightly serious, she looked up, and said, "'Cause you broke my heart."

So much time had passed since they split up, and yet...it still moved both of them to talk about it.

He was dumbfounded. How could that have been? She never let on at all. When he heard that she was dating guys from the store, the jealousy was agonizing. If he had known that she felt this way, he would have persisted in getting her back.

How blind youth can be, he thought.

Looking into the distance, Sam replied, "Funny, how that happened to both of us".

There was a pause while they both thought of what to say next. They weren't really uncomfortable. On the contrary, both had a sense of relief. After all those years they were finally talking about it...not to some friend...to each other. Here they were alone in this beautiful, quiet place. The sun was creating fiery clouds on the horizon, the wind gently blew through the pines, and the warm water was caressing their tired muscles. There was nothing to distract them, or anyone to interrupt. It was very peaceful. Finally, their old baggage was going to be dropped.

Taking the plunge, Sam relayed what had happened so long ago.

Even though he was bright and independent at 20, he really didn't know what he wanted in life...except for Tina. He was a bit restless. After they split up, he was more restless than ever.

"I don't know when it happened", continued Sam. "Southern California didn't give me the contentment I had when I was younger. I had always loved the place...especially the beach. You know that. It was getting more crowded, smoggy, and it seemed like the only topic on the evening news was crime. Vacant land was disappearing fast. Even the orange trees and strawberry fields that were famous in Orange County were quickly disappearing. Remember the miles of hills along that stretch of coast south of Newport to Laguna and in to San Clemente?"

Tina nodded in agreement.

"School made me more uncertain about my future. Except when I was surfing, there was always a yearning to be somewhere else...anywhere else...and I didn't know where."

He and Tina spoke about it a couple of times, but Tina found it hard to relate. Her home was there in Long Beach and that is where she wanted to raise a family with Sam...not far from where she grew up. She wanted them to know and be close to her parents and sister.

With another urging from Tina, Sam proceeded with his story. He told her about how he got started shipping oil out of college and even though he was making good money, there was this nagging feeling inside to be someplace other than southern California. Besides, there were too many memories of her around there that made it difficult to exist.

Taking a sip of wine, he continued, "School just dragged my last year. I had trouble focusing after we split up. I missed you incredibly. Finally, I graduated and a friend helped me get a job in the oil business."

"Oh, yeah. Mom used to tell me you met her for lunch and told her you were shipping oil."

"That's right. Boy, I really enjoyed seeing her during that time period. It gave me a connection to you and a hope that you weren't gone forever."

Tina smiled. Every time her mom mentioned that she had lunch with Sam, it brought a little bit of a twinge to her heart. In her mind, she was over Sam, but there was probably some underlying hurt there. Outwardly, she acted somewhat aloof with her mom's recanting of those lunch discussions, but, in reality, she hung on every word.

Now, she was hanging on his words. "So, then what did you do?"

"Well, I came through Colorado on a motorcycle in '77 during a vacation with about 10 friends. We came through Durango on a fluke and really liked it. I realized then that this open country was where I needed to be. This is going to sound hokey, so don't laugh."

"I won't," she said.

"Well, we'll see. You know...I never believed in reincarnation, but I swear..." His gaze returned to the distant forested slopes. "...sometimes I feel that I once lived out here in the wild country and lonely canyons of the West. It's so overwhelming at times." Turning his head back to look at her, "I just love it out here."

Stretching his arm out to the distant La Plata Mountains, "Look at that country...it's so beautiful. Much of it is like it has been for years...untouched, unspoiled. More than anything, it's the quietness. In the cities I get wrapped up in life through all of the noise and distractions." He smiled at her with a bit embarrassment. "Out here, I find it easier to just listen...to the needs of my soul. This place gives me so much peace of mind, and took me so many years to get here...I guess I'll always live here."

Looking out on the view, Tina could see why Sam was so taken by this country. From here, she could look almost 180 degrees and strain to see the horizon. The air was clear and made distances hard to judge. There was layer after layer of mountains covered in forests, each one getting fainter and fainter in the distance...all set against an endless sky.

"So, what did you do after the oil business?" she asked.

He told her about his decision to move to Breckenridge, how he worked a variety of low paying jobs, how he struggled for a while trying to earn a living and learn the ski industry. He pounded nails and learned how to build houses in the summers. He moved to Jackson Hole, Wyoming and was lucky enough to buy an old, broken down 2-bedroom cabin on 10 acres about 15 miles outside of town before the "in-crowd" drove real estate through the atmosphere. He spent a year remodeling and enlarging it. Even though he moved back to Summit County, Colorado, he kept it, and rented it to a friend. When he finally sold it five years later, his $60,000 investment sold for almost $600,000.

At Keystone Resort he got his break in upper management. More importantly, he remodeled another old clunker of a house for almost nothing and sold it for another crazy profit. Luckily, the owner felt sorry for him and carried the paper personally. Sam paid the guy back and immediately bought two building lots for less than his profit. He was lucky enough to hit not only the boom in Jackson, but another that was about to hit Summit County, Colorado.

The first house he built brought a sizeable profit as the market started ramping up. Sam bought a third lot. The next summer he built another house on the second lot, which was much bigger and fancier than the first house. He doubled the profit of the first house. By then he was too busy at Keystone to continue building. Instead he then bought a duplex in need of repair, but it had regular tenants and it could be remodeled slowly. He thought he would save the third lot for a house of his own one day...or for the investment. By the time he returned from Vermont, his real estate investments in Colorado allowed him to pay cash for this house here and still have a "small pile in the bank".

Sam paused again and then looked into Tina's eyes. He had to get it out. He should have 18 years ago.

"You know...it was probably 3 years before I think I was really over you and it didn't make me sick inside. I loved you so much and always thought we'd be together. And then...I hurt you like no one should ever hurt someone else."

Sam's chest started pounding. His throat was hurting from the growing lump.

"I'm sorry, Tina, for asking you to get that abortion. I've never forgiven myself."

He looked away from her and let the tears fall down his cheek.

Tina saw the pain in his face and felt sorry for him. That was an awful day. She remembered the events like it was yesterday.

* * *

Sam came home for six weeks during his senior Christmas mid-semester break from school. He was ecstatic to see her...at least it seemed so to her. He was still uncertain of what he wanted to do for a career. They spent time together almost every day or night wherever they could find a secluded parking spot.

When she missed her period a couple of weeks later she was scared, but happy too. From early on in their relationship, she had looked forward to the day when they could start a family. She decided to drive up to San Luis Obispo and surprise Sam with the news. Then, they both could tell their parents together. After all, she had no doubt that Sam would be happy as well...at least after he got over the shock.

She left Long Beach after work so by the time she arrived at Sam's house, it was already about 10:00pm. It was a Friday and a party was going on. The house was packed with college kids. She squeezed her way through the crowd looking for Sam. After five minutes she found him in the hallway kissing a girl. She stared in disbelief.

_This couldn't be happening_ , she told herself.

She had to get out of there as fast as she could. When she turned to run, Sam caught a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye. He caught her by the arm in the front yard. The argument was loud and awful. She was hurt and her trust annihilated.

He was drunk and didn't see the harm. "The kiss didn't mean anything."

"You bastard. How can you say that? If it never meant anything, why do it?"

Sam got frustrated, "I don't know. She was just there."

Tina started to cry. "How many other times were they just there, Sam?"

"It never happened before. I swear to you."

She tried to calm herself down. "You haven't even asked why I'm here. I'm pregnant, Sam. I thought I'd surprise you...and instead you embarrass me."

Sam stared at her for a couple of seconds. "Pregnant! How can that be? You're on the pill!"

"It just did, Sam."

"Well, you're going to have to get rid of it!"

Tina was dumbfounded. "What?"

"You heard me! I'm not ready to have a baby. We're not ready. For crying out loud, Tina, I'm still in school!"

Tina didn't remember much of the rest of the conversation. She just ran to her car with Sam running behind, yelling at her. She drove as far as Santa Maria and checked into a motel exhausted, crying herself to sleep.

There were a couple of phone conversations the next day with Sam after she got home. It was the first time her parents had seen her upset since she started dating Sam. So, this concerned them very much. They knew something was very wrong.

Sam drove down the following weekend and the two of them spent the better part of two days arguing. He finally left Sunday night heading back to school with Tina agreeing to an abortion. She told him that they were through, and that she never wanted to see him again.

* * *

Sam turned back to Tina. Tears were running down his face. "I've been empty inside ever since I drove back to San Luis Obispo knowing that I wanted you to kill our baby. How could you ever forgive me?"

As hard as it was for Tina to remember, she felt a bit of relief hearing Sam apologize after all those years. She could tell he had suffered enough and there was no sense going over it again. It was long ago and he wasn't the same kid he was then. That was when she knew that she had forgiven him.

Tina moved a bit closer and reached out. Wiping his tears, she said "I'll never forget the pain you caused me, but I forgive you. I'm here, aren't I?"

He was puzzled about her being there. "Why now, Tina, after all of these years?"

There it was. She knew that she'd eventually have to tell Sam why she came so far to see him after all this time. She brought both of her hands out of the water and wiped her hair away from her face, smoothing it back over her head and down the back of her neck.

She smiled gently at him. "I tell you what. Why don't we get out of this water before we both shrivel away? I'll take a quick shower and then help you with dinner. We can talk about it then."

* * *

The sun was gone over the horizon when she came downstairs. Through the glass prow, the stars were starting to appear in the darkening sky. Sam was lighting a fire in the wood-stove in the greatroom.

"Oh, that looks nice." The wet hair must have chilled her.

"I haven't sat in front of a fire for years." When was that she thought? _Had to be on the last Mammoth trip with Ron and Matt about 6 or 7 years ago. Those were happier times._

Turning away from the fire now that it was burning pretty good, he noticed how pretty and desirable she looked. The greatroom was lightly lit from the wall sconces, which bounced off the log walls and ceiling. As a result, it was the flames flickering that lit up Tina's face. When he saw her, it almost stopped him cold. She had on a pair of black tights that accented her shapely legs, and a wide neck, long red sweater that went to mid-thigh. The heavy knit of the sweater caressed her shoulders and down around her breasts. Her blonde hair was still damp and combed straight back. His first inclination was to stand up and hold her tight, kissing her long and hard. Taking in all of this in a split second, he gained some sense of sanity thinking that he must be nuts.

Quickly he asked, "Did the Jacuzzi help those aching muscles?"

Chuckling, she winked. "Oh yes. And the wine didn't hurt either. I'm feeling so much better. How can I help you with dinner?"

"Well, tonight I thought we'd have some good old comfort food since it's probably a little colder than you're used to, not to mention all the energy burned in the last couple of days skiing. So, I thought that I'd make a nice vinaigrette salad, some spaghetti with sausage, and some seasoned, green beans. Does that sound alright?"

"That sounds wonderful." The fire was warming her up.

"Good. How about you make the salad and then you can help me drink the wine."

"How about I drink some wine while I make the salad?" she smiled.

He didn't know which lit up her face more, her smile or the firelight. "You can do that", he replied.

What a great idea...he would need some wine to dull his emotions right about now. Wait a minute, what was he thinking? Wine? Now? He might really get crazy. He would just have to maintain control. After all, he didn't want to scare her off again.

"I'll open it right away", he said.

Sam got Tina started in the kitchen with the whereabouts of all the cookware and salad bowls. Then, he went down to the wine cellar and picked out a good bottle of Barbera. The salad was well on its way by the time Sam got the wine open.

"Here you go," said Sam. He held a glass out to Tina, while holding up his own. "To old friends. May they not separate again as they did before."

What a nice thought. She hoped that would be true. She looked intently into his eyes with a little crooked grin. "That would be a mistake."

Clinking her glass with his, she thought of their breakup. Why hadn't they talked before? Most of the time, she believed they had always been able to talk about anything. She knew now that wasn't true. It was her youth being wishful. But finally, the baggage had been dropped after so many years.

If she looked at him again tonight like that, he'd go into a coma. He just knew it. Her turquoise eyes were indeed striking...mesmerizing as most people put it. Whenever she looked at him in the past like that, he felt it hard to release from her gaze. He found himself not thinking about anything, but her.

Finally blinking at her, he returned, "Yes, it would be a mistake."

They took a drink looking at each other over the tops of the glasses.

"That's delicious. What did you call this?" she asked breaking the momentary silence.

"Barbera. When I was over in Italy with Gio, we found this little vineyard not far from his hometown. It was beautiful. About five miles back into the hills with the Mediterranean below. This was my favorite wine besides that white we had earlier. So, I got hold of an importer in Denver that would ship it to me. I splurge and buy a case about once a year.

Busying themselves cooking dinner and drinking wine, the evening eased along with pleasant conversation about the last couple of days skiing and the surrounding countryside. Sam cooked some Italian sausage and peppers while simmering the sauce. Tina helped out sautéing some green beans in butter and herbs.

It wasn't until after dinner that Sam finally asked Tina again about this mysterious trip.

She curled her leg underneath her as she sat on the soft, leather sofa facing the fire. It had been another lovely day with Sam. The skiing was once again delightful, and being here in his house...it was so warm and inviting. She felt at home here. Strange how that thought leapt into her mind. Home with Sam. She hadn't put those two words together in many, many years. It's not like she had dreamed about him over the years. Well, maybe she thought about him a few times over the last half dozen years or so. Up until then, she was pretty content in her life with Ron. Sam rarely entered her mind unless she had seen an old, mutual friend, or saw something that reminded her of him, like the jolt when her son, Matt, asked her and Ron for a surfboard for his 12th birthday.

She knew that she'd eventually have to explain why she came to Durango. Looking into the fire she began.

"My marriage was pretty good for about ten years...not great, but good. We bought a house 4 miles from mom and dad. Ron got a promotion at work. We tried to have another baby for a couple of years, but couldn't. Ron kept saying it must be me. So finally, I went to a doctor. It wasn't me. When I told Ron everything was okay, I asked him to go get a checkup. That's when we discovered it was him. It was a drag for a while. It's probably when we first starting having any problems at all. We thought about adopting, but we could never come to an agreement. I guess right around the time Matt started surfing..." Sam raised an eyebrow and looked at Tina with a grin.

"Yeah, he started surfing. Anyway, Ron was working more and more hours...getting grumpier by the year. I'd suggest three-day weekends to Vegas or a vacation to Hawaii, but he never had the time. I'd even plan romantic evenings at home. I'd take Matt over to mom's for the night. Cook a candlelight dinner. Wear something sexy, but the evenings were mostly a bust.

"Then, out of the blue he decides to take me out to dinner at The Glider Inn in Seal Beach." She glanced at Sam, "You know how I used to love eating there?"

Sam nodded.

"Well, we hadn't been there in ages. I thought it was going to be a special occasion. We struggled through conversation until dessert, and then he tells me that he is leaving me."

Her voice started to crack. Sam saw that her eyes were glistening...probably with tears about ready to flow.

"What a pig!" she blurts out. "He takes me out to dinner. Here, I am thinking that he's getting out of whatever doldrums that he has been in for the last couple of years, hoping that the evening will just get better. Then he tells me that he has been seeing someone at the office for the last 18 months."

A tear rolled down her face...the trail of it shining in the dim firelight. Sam leaned over and put his hand on her shoulder. She looked at him, and then glanced down while reaching up and squeezing his hand for a second. His thoughtful touch was welcomed.

"It gets better. The girl he's been seeing is 15 years younger than him. I remember seeing her at a company Christmas party once. I was amazed she showed up the way she did at a company function. I mean, I always tried to look sexy for Ron, but still classy. This chick had on a tight miniskirt that was almost up to her crotch. She wasn't wearing a bra, and the thin – almost see through - top she was wearing barely held her tits."

It was obvious that Tina was pissed at the girl, as she emphasized "tits". It caught Sam off guard because he knew Tina generally did not talk that way in the past...unless she was horny. Nonetheless, it did slightly arouse him when she did say it.

The tears were really flowing now. "He had been screwing her for a year and half, and then crawling into my bed and kissing me goodnight. Can you believe that pig?"

"Let me get you a Kleenex, Tina," Sam said as he quickly got up. He thought that a break might help Tina out a bit. He never imagined that he'd hear this much detail. She must have wanted to get it off her chest because she wasn't holding anything back.

The break for the tissue did help. Tina was calmer when Sam returned. She continued for another ten minutes telling all the sordid details of Ron's affair.

Wiping her eyes she continued. "After I divorced Ron, the only guys I met were either too old or didn't have a clue about life and how to treat a woman. I don't know how many blind dates I tried from well-meaning friends. The guys were shallow or selfish...usually wanting a lot more than I wanted to give...mostly sex, but not willing to give anything emotionally back to me. I haven't had a great opinion of men over the last couple of years, as you can imagine.

"Anyway...I told you at the _Olde Muldoon_ that mom mentioned you one day over lunch. When she first suggested that I come to see you I thought she was nuts, but then I remembered the good times and how well we got along."

She looked at him and smiled. "You always treated me so good...except at the end. So, I thought what the heck? If you weren't tied down, maybe we would still get along after all of these years."

There it was. She couldn't be any clearer than that. And now she waited. How was Sam going to react?

Sam shifted ever so slightly. She came to see him. It was hard for him to believe. How many times had he thought about this in the distant past and wished it would happen? But, was it a day late and dollar short? After all, they weren't twenty-two anymore. A lot of years had passed. He was a different person. He wasn't a boy, dumbfounded about his future. He was a fairly successful businessman. He had known and loved half-dozen women. True he didn't love them enough to get married...except the "dragon lady" and that was a colossal failure. And what about Lynda? She was very important to him. The best female friend and companion he'd had in years. True, he and Tina had a lot in common when they were younger. Was that enough now? Maybe. Over the last two days it did seem that they still had similar viewpoints on life and enjoyed each other's company.

In the split second that all of that went through Sam's mind there could only be one response.

Smiling, "I knew staying in touch with your mom through all of these years would pay off. I'm glad you came to see me, Tina. It's been a wonderful surprise."

He reached out and touched her cheek, gently rubbing it with his index finger. Tina made no move to back away. A weight was lifted. She hadn't told anyone the details of that story about Ron except to Debbie. Funny how she told Sam so easily. She didn't even have to think about what to say, or not to. Just like he used to do, Sam just listened. He was there for her...again.

With a smile, she breathed a big sigh of relief. A weight had been lifted. "My mom always had a soft spot for you...and I'm glad she did. It's really nice to be here...the skiing, your company, and mostly making me feel welcome in this beautiful home of yours."

"It's been my pleasure. Say, how 'bout some more wine?" Sam started getting up.

Tina raised her hand. "Let me get the wine. Why don't you get your guitar? I'd like to hear you play...like you used to play on the lifeguard stands."

"So, you remember that?"

"I've always remembered that. I didn't lose my memory after all these years," she said with a slight giggle heading for the kitchen.

Sam was tuning his guitar when she was walking back from the kitchen. Holding two wine glasses, she pointed to the windows with one of them. "Look, it's snowing."

The outdoor lights were reflecting off the flakes and lighting up the darkness. In fact, it was snowing pretty heavily. "I just love it when the flakes are big, gently floating down with no wind. It's so peaceful."

"Yeah, it's one of the beautiful things about this country," Sam said as he continued to tune his guitar.

Tina had walked over to the window to look outside. She sipped her wine as the flakes passed by her eyes.

"How much do you think has fallen so far?" he asked.

He stood up and walked over to the window. "Looks like about one or two inches. I'd better not play very long. By the looks of how fast it's falling, the roads may get bad."

She turned and looked at him. There was peace in her face. "You can play a little while. Besides now that I got that ugly story off my chest, I want to relax with you awhile. If the roads get bad, we'll go slow."

Sam played mostly ballads that night...only one rocker of any sort. As he played, Tina drifted with the music. An hour went by very fast. The older songs reminded her of her youth and nights on the lifeguard stands with Sam. For the first time in a long time, she daydreamed about happy times...years ago with Sam, and the events of the last few days. The wine accelerated her relaxation. They'd polished off two bottles since the Jacuzzi. She thought how nice it was not to feel pissed or hurt anymore. She had been mad at Ron for so long. And now, it didn't matter. Somehow, in the last day and a half she came to terms with her divorce, and reconciled the old wound that hurt a loving relationship with Sam.

"I wrote this next song about two years after we stopped seeing each other. No one has ever heard it before," said Sam as he started picking the strings of his guitar.

Halfway through the song, the lump in her throat started forming. By the time he finished, she was close to tears. It was all she could do to not cry again. The way Sam expressed himself through music always amazed her. How did he find the words that brought forth so much emotion?

"So, what do you think? Did you like it?" Standing up from the couch, he walked over to put his guitar back in its case, which was in the corner of the greatroom.

"I loved it...very much." She got up and took a couple of steps toward Sam. "What made you write it two years after we broke up?"

When he got up from the case and turned, Sam saw that she had moved towards him. Taking a few steps, he stopped to within a foot of Tina. Looking into her eyes, he grinned and slightly nodded his head with acknowledgement of why he wrote it.

"I had to find a way to heal myself after two years of pain. Putting my feelings into music helped me to start getting on with life. Odd...every time I was a little down about a relationship, this was one of the songs that always helped me through tough times."

Tina was full of emotion. The skiing had exhilarated her senses and fatigued her muscles. The scenery was breathtaking, strange, and isolated. The quaint, Victorian town was everything southern California wasn't. There was only the past...good memories of her time together with Sam, and the now...cooking dinner together, sharing it in the soft light of the fire in the warmth of these comfortable rooms. Sam's music speaking to her heart.

Sam was still looking into her eyes. "It's getting pretty late. We probably ought to get on the road." All he wanted to do was hold her...all night. Driving her back to _The Strater_ was the last thing he wanted to do. Did she not see this in his eyes?

"If you think we should. You know the roads better than I do," Tina said softly. She was thinking _..."I don't think you really want me to go, Sam. I can see it by the way you're looking at me. I don't want to go back to town and stay alone tonight. Ask me."_

" _I've got to be nuts"_ , he thought. He gave up on his emotions for her too early once before, and it was the end of their relationship. _"I'm not going to make that mistake again"_.

He reached out and held her by the waist. "We probably ought to, but...I don't really want to take you back tonight."

She didn't resist his hold at all, and her arms went naturally around his neck. "Then don't. I'd rather be here in your arms...all night."

It started slowly...a long, soft kiss. Then another. It wasn't new territory for either one of them. But, enough time had passed that discovery had to be made carefully...with patience. At first, it was only lips. Caressing each other...slightly sucking...a little nibbling. The feeling was vaguely familiar to both of them, but still strange. Delightfully strange. So long ago they knew what to expect from a night alone in the back of Sam's van or at his apartment. And even though those stolen moments were lovely, they were hurried by youth's inexperience. Here and now, it was entirely different.

As Sam picked Tina up and cradled her in his arms, their breathing became hard and shallow with anticipation. He was as nervous as she was. She buried her head in the crook of his neck and shoulder for the short distance to his room.

He gently raised her arms and pulled the sweater over her head. He unbuttoned his shirt and pulled her close. He kissed her long and deep. She was giving herself to him. He pulled back the sheet on them while still in their underwear. Sam wasn't in any hurry and he didn't want to seem over anxious.

Sam couldn't believe how beautiful and desirable she looked. The years had been kind to her without a trace of cruelty. Her skin was smooth, her body was still firm with supple thighs and an almost flat stomach with just the slightest hint of stretch marks.

He quickly remembered every curve moving his fingers along the silkiness. Tina had always been small boned without being thin. There was a little bit of extra weight, but it made her look more womanly and desirable. Lying next to her he lightly stroked her body as he gently kissed her...arms, hands, stomach...

Tina was floating on a wave of euphoria. Oh yeah, her body had been caressed by Sam before, but not like this. She loved him so much back then, but they were kids really. She rarely felt unfulfilled when they were together, but as time passed...she found there was more. And after all those years, Sam was sending shivers up her spine and making her gasp as he moved his hands along her skin...and the lace.

"My God, you're beautiful" he whispered.

Together, they climbed in intensity...step by step. At first, they were cautious, still not fully knowing what each other wanted, or expected. They were searching for some familiarity. As it grew, so did their pleasure. Their movements sped up until they exploded and crashed into each other's arms. They didn't let go. They couldn't let go. Neither one of them wanted to let go.

Their breathing was slowing down. The moisture on their skin was cooling them off. Sam combed his fingers through her hair and softly rubbed his fingers over her face, around her ear, and down along the neck to her shoulder. At last they fell asleep. Throughout the night they napped intertwined. Arms and legs crossed over in a manner not allowing distinction of whose was whose until they awoke and exhausted each other into napping again. By the time the morning sun woke them around 8:00, they had made love three times. Neither one of them could remember the last time that had occurred.

Sam stirred first. His arm underneath her neck had evidently been there a long time as it was numb. He had tried flexing the fingers to wake them up. The movement of his arm muscles woke Tina as her head rested on his chest. She kissed his chest before raising her head to look at him.

"Good morning," she said with a slight grin. Her turquoise eyes sparkling at him as her blonde hair fell across her face.

"It is a good morning...a very good one. How did you sleep?" he asked.

"Very little. Don't you remember?" She displayed a smile that resembled a cat swallowing the canary. "You had me up most of the night."

"No, I think you had me up most of the night." He lifted her chin up to kiss her on the lips.

Sam had built a large double shower in the master suite. Both shower heads never being used before at the same time...until today. For a split second, he thought of Lynda meticulously laying the tiles in the shower, but that was interrupted by Tina soaping down his back.

He hurried downstairs after dressing in sweat pants and a pullover allowing for Tina to take her time.

He was already drinking coffee at the breakfast nook looking outside, while the sausage was sizzling on the stove. It was a cold, overcast morning. The snow, which had started last night gently falling in big flakes, was now blowing around and coming down hard. Visibility was only a couple of hundred yards. Sam was looking at the snow stake he had put out back. To his best guess it looked like 16 inches had fallen overnight. It was a big dump and getting bigger. Pondering the beauty of last night and the conditions currently outside, he was in no hurry to drive Tina...where? Why would she want to go into town this morning? Would she after last night? There wasn't anything requiring her presence. After all, she did come here to see him.

"Wow, look at that storm. I haven't seen it snow like that ever." She came over and from behind his chair placed her arms around his neck and kissed him on the side of the cheek. Tina was wearing only a robe. The hot shower had left her quite warm.

"That coffee smells good," as she released his neck and went for the coffee on the kitchen counter. "How much do you think it snowed last night, Sam?"

Sam continued looking out the large windows where the nook was tucked into. "My guess is at least 16 inches, and it looks like right now it's coming down about an inch an hour." Turning to look at her, he noticed how radiant her face looked. "Flip those sausages over will you?"

"Sure."

He took a sip of coffee smiling at her over the edge of the cup. "How do you feel about being snowed in?"

With a spatula in hand she was playing with the sausage in the pan. "I kind of like the idea." A grin crossed her face as she looked down at the sizzling breakfast. "Do you have anything in mind to occupy our time?"

"Oh, I can think of one or two things."

Turning to face him, she had her left hand on her hip and held the spatula raised in her right hand. The robe was loosely tied. One leg was slightly forward exposing her knee and upper thigh. Sam thought that she looked more desirable than ever. Here she was cooking breakfast and it was turning him on.

"Only one or two things?" Last night was incredible she thought. Not only had it relieved the sexual tension building up over the last couple of days, but it felt like a new beginning, or at least like the end of the past hurt. It certainly didn't hurt the fact that her last sex was with her ex-husband and that was mediocre near the end, not to mention it had been over 2 1/2 years ago.

"I was hoping you could come up with more than that?" It felt so good to feel desirable again with a man she...uh, how did she feel about Sam?

Sam got up and walked over to her. She didn't move. He placed his cup down on the counter behind her. Reaching out he pulled the robe apart just enough to place his hands on her naked hips. "Well, I may need some help with more than that." He pulled her close and kissed her.

"I don't think you need help at all," she said.

Luckily, she turned the stove off before they went back to bed. The sausage was never eaten.

By two o'clock the storm had eased and it had started to clear. By that time, Sam and Tina had decided to get some fresh air. With almost two feet of new snow outside, walking wasn't feasible. With a little coaxing Sam convinced Tina that snowshoeing was not only the best choice, it was also fun. She couldn't have been in a better mood. Sam had seen fit to "smooth out any edges" she might have had left from last night. So, she was game for anything and it didn't take her long to get the hang of the snowshoes.

Walking out in back of the house, they skirted the edge of the canyon for about 200 yards and then entered the trees. The trees were heavily laden, drooping under the great weight now accumulated in their branches. It was so quiet. Dead quiet except for the occasional breeze. The new snow provided an insulation that stopped any far off noise. The wind was gentle... blowing crystals into the air every now and then that landed against their faces.

Pausing and facing into the breeze, Sam said, "I just love the feeling of wind in my face."

Tina smiled at him. She had always remembered a sentiment he shared with her long ago on the bluff above the beach on the night of their first date. Speaking out, not really directing it to Sam, but just into space, she said, "Whenever the wind gusts I feel like God is blowing life into the world and reminding me of his presence." She often told that to Matt when he was a young boy.

Sam turned and looked into her eyes. Did he mention that to her long ago? It was a feeling he had had for years. "Yes, that's exactly what I feel."

"I remember. I've always loved that thought. It's one of my sweetest memories I have of you, Sam. On our very first date overlooking the ocean at the Huntington Cliffs, you told me that story. I think I fell for you right then."

Gently moving his head side to side as if acknowledging a mistake, he lamented, "To be able to go back to that time and not make mistakes again." He softly smiled. "I was nuts about you, Tina. I couldn't wait to see you each and every day. I was a young fool...and I was miserable when I lost you. It's hard to believe you're here now."

"Believe it," she said.

Her azure eyes often burned deep into his soul, but did he see something he hadn't seen in oh so long?

She continued. "There's no place I'd rather be at this moment. Nothing else exists right now except you and me. Share more of this special place with me? I want to know as much as I can about your life here and what is important to you."

Sam played tour guide pausing every so often to point out a distant peak, or tracks in the snow made by some critter. This was a world all new to Tina, so far from the suburbs of southern California. Of course the weather was different, but it was the place...and the feelings it gave her. This vast country provided a peacefulness that she couldn't remember having in a very long time. She felt it now only when sitting on the beach and looking out over the Pacific. Was it the place or the man? There was something else that she couldn't quite put her finger on. It was emptiness. The vastness. It was inspiring, yet scary to a city girl that was used to crowded roads, shopping centers, and neighbors ten feet from your house.

The quietness echoed in her ears when they stopped walking. She never realized the slight ringing in her ears before. Each time when they came out of the trees and the vistas opened before her, she realized how small she was in the grand scheme of the world. In all of her life, she never had that feeling at home or anywhere else.

The earth folded into great distances, the colors fading on each subsequent ridge. The granites were deep grayish-purple. It seemed that every color of green imaginable was splashed on the hills laden with the heavy snow. The parting clouds allowed the late afternoon sun to filter pinks and oranges onto the peaks.

Each step she took in the soft snow brought a new sense to her. She could feel the cool air entering her lungs and energizing her as she lifted her snowshoes out of the deep snow. She was looking at the different vegetation and how the snow had drifted against rocks and trees.

Through it all, she noticed Sam. He sure looked to be in his place in the world. She couldn't remember seeing any guy look so content. It was the way Sam looked and moved so many years ago along the beach when he was young and didn't have a care in the world.

They had been gone for about two hours. By the time the house was back in sight, the sun was setting in the winter sky.

"So, what did you think?" asked Sam. They were unbuckling the snowshoes while sitting on the edge of the deck.

"I didn't know what to expect using these things, but I enjoyed it very much. It's a world I would have never known. Do you snowshoe often?"

"After a big snow...like this. Sometimes, I'll go out during a storm or at night...even better if it's a full moon. The earth feels even quieter at night."

"I don't see how it could get any quieter. It almost hurts my ears now." She looked at him. "That probably sounds weird. Doesn't it?"

He chuckled. "Not really. Sometimes, I'll catch myself realizing that my ears are buzzing."

"Thank, God, it isn't just me," she laughed. "I thought I was a little nuts in the head."

Sam winked at her. "You just haven't been out of the city long enough to know what silence really is." He pointed to the distant peaks. "...Or beauty."

She leaned closed to him, inches from his lips. "Maybe I need to spend more time away from the city." Her kiss softly engulfed his lower lip.

He looked into those eyes with a grin. "I can suggest a nice place with good company."

"Would that place include arms to hold me during a long winter night?"

"Most definitely."

They were both hungry from the long walk and the love-making from the night before and that morning. Dinner was hearty, but quick. They didn't eat for pleasure, but they would need the nutrition.

### Chapter 22

### To Telluride

Winter in southwestern Colorado can often be mild. True to this, the next day broke clear and cool, but a forecast of warmer temps. The roads had been plowed by the time Sam and Tina piled into the car. On a spur of the moment, they decided to tour around the region. He didn't elaborate on where they were going. He just wanted the trip to unfold naturally and to Tina's delight she was up for an adventure. So, they packed a light bag of clothes, some munchies for the road, and a thermos of coffee. They had no idea how many days they'd be gone...and it didn't matter.

Sam headed west along highway 160. He had the perfect "tour" for an out-of-towner...the loop from Durango, west to Cortez, north to Telluride and Ridgway, and then south to Ouray and Silverton before heading back home. This region in the San Juan Mountains was known for its scenic splendor and unique Victorian towns. The weather could be iffy this time of year, but he thought that Tina would enjoy seeing some of Mesa Verde's ancient Indian ruins if all the roads in the park weren't closed due to the snow. The old mining town of Telluride, turned millionaires hide-away, was definitely a destination along with Ouray the "Little Switzerland of America".

The snow pretty much closed the ruins on Mesa Verde to foot traffic, but Tina at least got to see some of them from the road. She hadn't seen anything like them before. It was amazing how the "ancient ones" lived below the edge of the cliffs protected from invading tribes.

Sam explained how they farmed and hunted for food while pointing to the smooth rock faces between the cave dwellings and the top of the cliffs. Worn away over the centuries were very small impressions in the sandstone. These were actually footholds that the Indians used to climb up to the mesa. It was up there that they farmed or hunted for food.

After grabbing some sandwiches in Cortez, they headed north up the Dolores River valley to Telluride. Every bend in the road provided Tina with a new discovery of lofty spires, the raging river, and narrow valleys.

Time in between landmarks was spaced perfectly for the long, lost lovers. It allowed them time to reminisce and discover more of their present lives. They thoroughly enjoyed being alone with each other away from the rest of the world. At that time of year, the lonely highways of "the loop" was very accommodating.

"Tell me about Matt, Tina. You've hardly mentioned him," asked Sam.

Tina was looking out the window and gazing at the landscape lost in happiness. At the mention of Matt's name, her face lit up. She knew the subject would come up eventually. Pausing a moment, she then turned towards Sam.

"He's a great kid, Sam. He looks a lot like me. He was a "toe-head"...blonde, baby boy."

"Seems to me I used to talk about having blonde baby boys with you."

That gave Tina a bit of lump in her throat. Sam could see the slight impact of that statement.

"I'm sorry, Tina. That was probably inappropriate."

She looked at him lovingly and reached out to touch his hand. "It's okay." She couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, you did talk about blonde babies."

"Well, I'm glad you got him."

"He's my joy. He's always been sweet and thoughtful...a bit of handful when he hit 12 and discovered girls."

"I think that's a guy character flaw."

"Yeah, well maybe. That's all he thought about. His looks matured faster than the other boys in his class. For a while there he was...the tallest kid in his class. So, here was this blonde, blue eyed 13-year-old with wide shoulders and a killer smile. The girls, even two years older than him, were going nuts. Ron didn't help matters. He just laughed and shrugged it off instead of guiding Matt. Hell, I had to sit Matt down and give him a heart to heart about keeping his pants zipped up."

"That's a little bizarre, although I would have liked to have seen that."

"Bizarre is right. Ron wasn't much of a father as Matt got into his teens. While I was trying to guide and discipline when Matt did screw up, Ron ignored the problems, and then didn't hold Matt accountable for any teenage mistakes."

Sam thought of the talk that he'd had with his dad and Gio about girls.It happened just about when he was 12 years old.

"You know, I remember Dad and Gio both sitting down with me in the back yard one warm evening talking to me about girls. Gio was very good at it. I think that's why Dad had him there."

"Sam" he said, "you've entered a point in your life when nothing will ever be the same again. Girls will control your life in some way or the other from now on. Most of the time it will be beautiful, some of the time it will be maddening, but you won't trade it for anything."

Sam smiled. "That part I remember word for word. Let me see if I can paraphrase the rest of what Gio said.

"Your hormones will go nuts. Trust me. You're going to want to hug, kiss, and touch those lovely young things. It's all right to have those urges. They will probably have them, too. But at some time you're going to get to a point when you know you're crossing the point of no return. You'll be in the back of a car or alone in a house and some of the clothes are going to start coming off. That's when you're going to have to be strong and stop. As hard as it may be, it will be the best thing for you, and your girl. There will be a time when you are old enough to understand love and know its responsibilities. Then it will be right. If that's your wedding night, it will beautiful."

"What a lovely speech. You were lucky to get that from two men that you looked up to. You didn't listen very well, though. Did you?" said Tina smiling a bit sarcastically.

Looking back at Tina, he smiled "Well, you were very tempting. Besides, I was in love with you."

"Thank you, Sam. I don't have any regrets either. In any event, Matt could have used a talk like that from Ron. Luckily, the talk I had with him must have sunk in because he talks to me quite a bit about his girlfriends and it seems like he respects them and knows he can't be stupid."

"How old is he now?"

"Uh, he'll be 14 in October."

"How's he doing in school?"

"His grades are holding up pretty well considering he spends every waking moment in the water. I swear I don't know how he does it, but he still manages to get A's."

Sam was smiling ear to ear thinking about his youth. "Why complain? That used to drive my dad crazy, too. He eventually saw that I was still doing well in school."

Tina always thought that it was strange that Matt grew up surfing without any urging from Ron. Smiling at Sam and nodding, "Matt does sound like you at that age. I'll try to be a little more understanding...as long as his grades hold up."

January in Telluride was generally quiet, so finding a hotel room was pretty easy. The town was already cast in the shadow of the surrounding cliffs 3,000 feet above the valley floor. Being in a box canyon the direct sun disappeared over the cliff edges around 3:30 in the afternoon this time of year. It wasn't quite dark by the time they checked into the San Sophia Inn. Sam had stayed here years ago for a conference and remembered how romantic it would be with the right lady. It was perfect for Tina.

As they unpacked and freshened up, they debated about walking around town awhile before dinner.

"It's probably getting pretty cold by now," said Tina looking Sam. " _Would he get the hint?"_

" _I think I get that body language"_ , he thought. Grinning, he said, "Well, it is almost dark. I don't know how much you'll be able to see anyway."

They were easy excuses, which quickly gave way to them pulling off each other's clothes.

Thirty minutes later Sam asked, "What is it about you that I always want to get you naked? I felt that way all those years ago and now look at me. I'm acting like an 18 year old."

Tina was nestled into Sam's shoulder looking up at the ceiling. Turning to look into his eyes she said, "Don't apologize about that. It's a terrific compliment at my age. I love being desirable to you."

"Oh, you're desirable alright." Sam started caressing her again.

"You ready again?" she asked with a smile.

Sam smiled back. "Well, I'm a little torn here. I hate to pass up this opportunity 'cause one of us might be too tired later. Most likely me. On the other hand, I'm getting kind of hungry 'cause you're wearing me out."

She shifted and propped herself up on her elbow to look down at him. "I tell you what. You make the choice. I can go either way. I'm hungry too. But just for the record...if you wait until later, were having coffee after dinner."

### Chapter 23

### The Other Woman

They left Telluride after an early breakfast with an extra cup of coffee for the road. The morning sun was shining through the windshield warming the inside of the car, which was in stark contrast to the cold, snowy landscape of the Dallas Divide. It was quiet on the road and they were alone in the rugged terrain and high peaks of the spectacular Sneffels Range.

Tina had arrived five days ago. Since that first night when she ran into Sam at the Olde Muldoon, they had been with each other almost every waking moment. In each other's arms, they had peacefully slept the last three nights together.

Now...in these early morning hours, they enthusiastically enjoyed the serenity and loneliness of the road. In quiet, sparse conversation they understood how wonderful it was to be in someone's company and be fully content. Was it like before, so many years ago...only better?

At the same instant, both were thinking, "Where do we go from here?"

The car phone ringing surprised both Sam and Tina.

Sam didn't look at the display. "Hello, this is Sam."

As soon as he heard her voice, he got uncomfortable in his seat. Clearing his voice, he spoke. "Hi! How's the trip to Phoenix going?"

He glanced at Tina and covered the mouth piece with his hand. "Just give me a few minutes."

Tina had wanted to ask Sam about the mysterious girl in his life for some time now. She hadn't forgotten the conversation they had in The Loft after dinner their first night. Sam had mentioned that he had a good female friend. She knew the proper time would eventually come. It had been irritating her ever so slightly like sand in her shoe. Watching Sam, she knew it was time to remove that sand.

Lynda always sounded so warm when she called. Today was no different. "Oh, it's been great. Siera has been properly spoiled by Diane and Nick, and they have been really good to me, as always. They took us shopping for clothes and a few toys for Siera, which is always a treat. You know we are on somewhat of a budget."

"Great. What did you get?" asked Sam.

Although, it seemed that Tina was just fine. He was uncomfortable with her listening to him speak to Lynda. The word that fit the best description...guilt. He didn't quite know if he should be placing such a harsh label on the feeling in his gut. After all, Lynda and he had never slept together. They were close emotionally and very good friends, but he had never expressed love to her. That was genuinely hard for Sam anyway. On the other hand, he was genuinely interested in how Lynda was doing. She often said that although she enjoyed these trips, they brought back a lot of emotions.

He thought that she had described some dresses and sweaters, but he wasn't sure.

"Even after six years, they still treat me like family. I love it. They're such loving people, Sam. I just wonder what it will be like when I remarry. Do you think it will crush them, Sam? I don't want to hurt their feelings."

"I didn't know you were getting married", he answered.

The word "married" raised Tina's interest to the next level. She slyly grinned at Sam and raised her eyebrows.

He looked back at her and with his hand holding the phone, he raised his forefinger as if to say, "Wait a minute and I'll tell you."

"Well, I'm not...at least right away." Lynda paused. "But, hopefully it won't be too long."

Sam didn't quite know what to say. He cared for Lynda a great deal, and until Tina showed up, Lynda was the most important woman in his life. Even though he had never mentioned marriage to her, the thought had crossed his mind. Did Lynda think the question was coming soon? More importantly, if Tina hadn't showed up, would he have eventually asked Lynda?

In the past, he had thought, "No".

He always equated marriage with kids and since asking Tina for an abortion so many years ago, he never felt...worthy. He now knew that was the reason why he never got too serious with women.

Lynda noticed silence on the other end of the phone.

"Hey, Sam! Are you still there?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Go ahead."

"It sounds like you're signal is breaking up. I'll call you when I get back in town in few days."

"That'd be great", he replied. "Be safe and say hello to Siera."

Clicking off the phone, Sam turned to Tina. "Sorry about that."

Tina again grinned at him slyly. "The good female friend you mentioned at The Loft the other night?"

"Yeah."

"I've been dying to hear about her. Don't feel embarrassed. I knew you couldn't be totally alone out here. Please, tell me."

The miles started to disappear behind them as he described how he had met Lynda when he first moved to town. They had become good friends. And then, something emotional started connecting them.

"She's been wonderful for me, Tina. Taking me as I am with all my flaws. I'm often so busy; I don't see her for a week or more. When I need someone to share sadness or joy, she's there for me. We're very close...but I've never slept with her. Through it all, I've had trouble fully committing to her. She's barely thirty and wants more children. Even though she's never pushed me, I think I've pretty much given up having kids."

Looking at Tina he continued, "I just don't think I really deserve them after what I put you through."

It was apparent more than ever to Tina how badly scarred Sam was for his decision on her pregnancy. She wondered how many good marriage opportunities he may have passed up over the years.

She had trouble getting the words out. After finding him again, did she want to chance losing him permanently? "Sam, if you love her, you ought to marry her and have those kids. What happened between us was a long time ago. I forgave you a long time ago. It's time you forgave yourself."

He watched the road ahead and slightly smiled. It was just like Tina to be so understanding.

"That may have been an easier decision a few days ago, Tina. Not now. What makes you think I'm willing to give you up?"

### Chapter 24

### Back Home

Airports make lousy places to say goodbye. They're full of strangers and impersonal...providing no privacy for hard things to say to one another. The Durango Airport was no different than others.

In a corner away from the gate, Tina and Sam sat in the chrome framed, vinyl covered seats found in so many airports around the world. With the windows at their backs they held each other's hands trying to find the words of what to do next.

The distractions were all around them. The voice over the loudspeakers announcing gate arrivals and loadings. The travelers lugging oversize carry-ons around trying to locate a vacant seat.

"I miss you already" said Sam finally. "I can't imagine what it's going to be like without you tonight. I like saying 'Goodnight' to you."

Tina tried not to cry, but her eyes were watery. She nodded in agreement. "Me too. I'll miss feeling you next to me when I wake up in the middle of the night. That's when I snuggle up close to you."

"So, now what are we going to do, Tina?"

"Hopefully, we think hard about a decision that's going to affect the rest of our lives...and we make the right choice."

Sam squeezed her hands and nodded back to her.

"I know what I want to say here and now, Sam, but I don't know how rational I could be. I'm full of the joy and excitement from the last week."

The last boarding call for her flight signaled the harsh reality that she was leaving. Sam walked Tina to the gate where the attendant was waiting for the last few travelers.

"I guess it's time," she said.

"Tina, these last few days have been indescribable. I didn't know if I'd ever feel this way about a woman again. You're like my 'split apart'. The thought of being away from you is almost unbearable. Don't give up on me once you're back home."

She remembered how she did give up on Sam so many years ago. "You keep thinking about me, Sam. Then call me with your thoughts. I'll be waiting."

Tina disappeared down the jet way. Saying good bye to her now was almost as bad as knowing long ago that she wasn't coming back to him. At that time, it was understandable because he was the cause. Now, it was just unknown...and again emptiness set in.

As Sam approached his car, he leaned on the roof with both hands, and hanging his head, he looked at the ground.

"What now? Once again, she's gone from my life and I'm...empty. That same gut-wrenching emptiness that has haunted me so often since I told Tina to get rid of our baby."

Tina looked out the window of the jet until Durango faded into the mountainous landscape below. She had held back tears until the plane started to taxi onto the runway. It had been an exciting week with Sam, full of new emotions, laughter, memories, and hope. Their goodbye kiss was still on her lips.

"Well, back home I go. Am I in love with him again? Or, was it just nice to be treated so well, and desired again?"

The tear ran down her face and into the corner of her lips. It was salty.

"I think I love you, Sam. I wonder what you're feeling."

### Chapter 25

### The Return

"Hi! I'm home." The phone earpiece exploded with Lynda's jubilation. "When can we see you? Siera and I missed you."

Sam had been half dreading seeing Lynda after being with Tina. He wasn't quite sure what he was feeling. It wasn't exactly guilt. Yes, he and Lynda were very close friends. They easily shared thoughts and emotions with each other. But, he had been careful to keep a distinct line from an intimate relationship.

How was it then that he could spend the better part of six wonderful days with Tina, a woman he hadn't seen in years? Every touch was second nature...holding her hand, brushing the hair from her face, softly kissing her lips. The delightfully intimate hours with her were more satisfying than those tender moments of years ago.

How was he going to feel and act around Lynda? The last thing he wanted to do was feel uncomfortable with her. That had always been the most attractive feature of their relationship to him. Luckily, most of his hesitation evaporated after hearing her voice.

"Hey, it's good to hear your voice. When did you get in?"

"Early this morning. Would you like to come over for dinner?" she asked.

"That'd be great. I'm just finishing some things up here and have a short meeting with Jason. I probably will leave here about 5:30. Could be at your house by 6:00. Will that work?"

"Perfect. Could you bring some wine? I'm out."

"You got it. See you then. Say, hi, to Siera."

The last couple of days, Sam was playing catch up at the mountain. He stayed in contact with Jason about operations while he was out of town with Tina, but there was still a pile of correspondence and some banking issues to address on his return. By the end of the morning, he was pretty well caught up. After handling a teasing and grilling by Julie about his 5 days away from the office with Tina, he made time to take a few turns around the mountain with Jason.

It became clear that he had chosen wisely in making Jason his "second" in command. While they road chairs and stopped here and there on the mountain, they discussed mountain improvements, water drainage and erosion, labor challenges, customer visitation counts, customer survey information, and budgetary opportunities. Jason had a good grasp of all the relevant topics a good general manager should know about. Sam wondered how soon he could turn it all over to Jason.

The little house was welcoming in the last light of the evening. The windows glowed with a pale yellow from the light inside and smoke was drifting out of the chimney. Against the white landscape, it emitted a promise of warmth.

He just started walking up the path from the driveway when the front door opened. Siera came running out of the door and down the snow covered walkway followed by Lobo. The big malamute ran past Siera and was the first to get Sam's welcoming arms.

"Move, Lobo" said Siera with a giggle pushing her big, fluffy dog out of the way.

She jumped into Sam's arms.

"Sam! You should see the presents grandma and grandpa gave me!"

"Oh! I can't wait," he responded with excitement.

"Hurry up you two. It's cold out here." Lynda was standing in the doorway with a big smile on her face looking elegant in that casual way unique to her.

As he approached the door, Lynda welcomed him with a hug of her own. "I missed you." She kissed him.

The battle started raging inside of Sam immediately. Lynda was here...in his life now. Just like always over the last year and a half, she had been providing comfort and companionship. Tina, still fresh in his mind and heart from the past week, was in another time zone.

Returning the kiss. "I missed you, too. It's nice to have you back."

Lynda didn't sense anything different. Sam's words and hugs were genuine. The connection was still there.

While Lynda finished making dinner, Siera excitedly showed Sam her gifts from her grandparents in the living room in view of Lynda from the kitchen. There were jeans, blouses, a sweatshirt, a couple of educational computer programs, and a new doll.

It was a low key evening as many of them were in the past when they got together at Lynda's house for dinner. The three of them spent time talking together, often playing a game of Clue, until it was time for Siera to go to bed.

Sam was sitting on the couch watching the flames in the fireplace when Lynda came into the living room from tucking Siera into bed. He looked up as she approached.

"How's she doing?"

Sitting down next to him, Lynda answered. "Oh, she'll be asleep in minutes. It's been a long day. We got up early to fly home."

"I bet you're tired."

She smiled. "A little, but not too bad. Besides I'd like to spend a little time with you before I turn in."

"So, tell me...how's your in-laws? Are they still your in-laws?"

"I still consider them that. I probably always will. They're doing fine. I think seeing them is really good for all of us. For Diane and Nick, seeing us is their way of keeping Lou alive." She paused and looked into the fire.

"What about for you? Does it keep Lou alive for you?" Sam asked.

"Maybe his memory, and that's a good thing for Siera. Even though she was barely two, I don't want her to forget her father."

She looked away from the fire and in to Sam's eyes. "Lou's gone forever, Sam. I'll never forget him, but I've been ready to move on...remarry for a couple of years."

There was silence. They looked into each other's eyes for a bit and almost at the same instant looked away.

Lynda looked away in embarrassment. She wasn't proposing to Sam in that statement, but she was suggesting the idea. When she didn't get an immediate response, she felt like maybe she crossed the line of their relationship too quickly and that Sam wasn't looking for that kind of commitment, or change just yet.

Sam did get uncomfortable. A week ago Lynda's statement may have affected him differently.

The fire sparkled in her eyes. "I made you a little uncomfortable didn't I, Sam?"

He looked down and then back to her. He wrapped his hands around hers and she looked back at him. "Lynda, I guess we have a bit of an unusual relationship, don't we? Not boyfriend-girlfriend, but more than friends."

The corners of her mouth perked up a bit. "You might say that."

"Does that bother you?"

She slightly nodded in agreement. "I would like more. I feel your caring and concern always, but it's like you're holding a part of you back. I've felt it for a long time."

The room was awash in the warm glow of the fire. The shadows were dancing on the wall from the light of the flames.

He let go of her hands and started fidgeting with his own, rubbing them as if they were sore. As he started to speak, he watched his right thumb massage his left palm.

"Lynda, long ago in my youth, I was in love with a girl that I thought I'd never be without. After a short while, we were engaged and everything was wonderful for almost 4 years. Then, I did something very stupid that can easily be blamed on youth. I was away at school, missing her very much, and had a little too much beer at one of our house parties. A girl from school started hitting on me, so I flirted back. Before I could think, I started kissing her and then out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend running away through the house. She had driven 200 miles to surprise me, but instead she saw me betraying her."

Lynda reached over and then placed her hands around his, stopping the intense massaging that he was doing. "And so you've..."

"That's not the end of the story," he interrupted. "Over the next few days we argued." Did he have the courage to tell Lynda the whole story? "I came to find out she was pregnant. She had come up to school to share her excitement and I destroyed her instead."

Seeing the tear fall down his cheek shocked Lynda. She had never seen him so upset. She lifted her hand to wipe his cheek, but he stopped her abruptly.

Looking at her in way that she had never seen, he continued. "To make matters worse, like some monster, I told her that I wasn't ready for a child and she'd have to get rid of it. After that she had nothing to do with me and I've never been the same. I've been holding something back from every woman I've met."

That was a surprise ending that Lynda wasn't ready for. It was hard for her to believe that this man she knew to be so compassionate and caring ever could have acted that way.

"Sam, I don't think what you did was right, but that was a long time ago. I think it's good that you're sorry about how you acted towards her, but how long are you going to punish yourself? You've got the rest of your life in front of you."

"Lynda, I've exposed my life to you more than any other woman I've known. I've wrestled with myself about our relationship for months. I've asked myself, 'Could she be the one to help me heal myself?'"

Her heart jumped. Should she restrain herself? she thought. "Sam, I think we could be good together. I've felt it for a few months."

The next words out of his mouth exploded in her ears like a thunderclap. "She came to visit me while you were away. We spent almost a week together and now I've never been more confused in my life."

The echo of that statement continued to roll into the distance and finally softened. Her heart was no longer jumping. In fact, she felt it sag into her chest. "Do you still love her, Sam?"

His eyes went back to the dancing flames of the fire. "I don't really know, Lynda. I don't like feeling this way, and I certainly don't like doing this to you. You mean too much to me."

Lynda summoned the courage. "Sam, it's taken me quite a while since Lou died to start thinking about another man in my life. Whoever came along, he was going to have big shoes fill. He was going to have to be someone that's a good husband to me and father to Siera. There hadn't been many opportunities. Then, you came along and I thought..." she nodded her head slightly, "possibly this guy is the one. Over the last few months I've known I was in love with you. But...I knew something was holding you back from me." She took a deep breath, "Sam, you're going to have to make decision. I want all of you...with no hesitation on your part. I don't want to keep hoping for something that might not happen."

Reaching for her hands, Sam answered. "Lynda, I'm pretty mixed up right now and I don't have an answer....and I know I need to make one. I can't put your future on hold. It's not right. And...I've got to somehow come to grips with my past. So, I'm going to get some advice from the one guy that can help me see straight."

### Chapter 26

### Advice from Gio

It was a pleasant late February day in southern California. Only a few puffy clouds dotted the blue sky and the temperature along Belmont Shore was in the mid-60's. Occasionally, but not often the Santa Ana winds blew during the winter. Starting the night before, they blew the smog offshore so the air was especially fresh on this day.

Gio was in his backyard trimming his many roses getting ready for spring. Even now at 95, he was still active and agile. He always wore his broad brimmed straw hat when working in the garden. Today was no different. He smoked a wine soaked cheroot while moving around the yard. His ever present "glass of red" was never more than a few feet away. He could make one glass last for hours.

Life had been good to him. Except for missing his beloved Victoria over these long 28 years, he had always looked happily at life through a "half-filled" glass. He knew deep in his heart it was only a journey and not the destination, but he was happily content to move through each day until the good Lord found it time to bring him home.

Even though his quiet, beachside community had grown over the 50+ years, he still reveled in it. With the cane in his hand that he never needed, he walked the neighborhood each day. He waved to everyone he encountered and stopped for short conversations with many of them...old and young alike. He was well-known in the neighborhood and had a way of making everyone feel special. By the time he said "goodbye" and started off gently swinging his cane, he left a smile on someone's face.

He loved having his oldest son, Ben, live next door and his other two boys and one daughter within an hour's drive. Taking a sip of wine, he smiled to himself knowing he was going to see his grandson. He loved being the wise old sage of the family. Everyone came to him for advice...his children and their spouses. Even his grandchildren came to him without any jealousy from their parents. After all, Gio seemed to have the answer for everything.

"Gio! How are you today?" asked Sam as he appeared through the opening in the fence that joined his parents' backyard to Gio's.

Looking up from trimming a rose with a broad smile, Gio opened his arms wide "Sam, give your grandfather a hug."

They embraced and then pulled back just enough to look at each other.

Gio lovingly patted Sam's cheek with an open hand. "You look good. You look more and more like your father at that age."

"Actually, I thought that I look more and more like you", replied Sam.

Gio grinned. "Well, I didn't want to say so, but you're right." He laughed heartily. "You're a lucky guy."

Gio turned towards a couple of padded, patio chairs near a fountain. "Come let's sit down." He reached for a bottle of wine on the nearby table. "Have some wine. It's one of my better ones."

As Sam sat down in one of the chairs, Gio began pouring the wine. "Now, tell me what made you fly all the way from Colorado to ask my advice? It must be very important that you didn't want to talk on the phone."

Sam loved sitting there in Gio's garden. He had spent much of his life there with his beloved grandfather. When Gio helped build Ben and Maryann's home next door, they decided to keep their backyards open to each other through a section in the fence. It wasn't like the old family compounds that Gio was used to in Italy, but it was the next best thing.

"Gio, do you remember Tina?"

A smile crossed Gio's lips. "Ah, she was a lovely girl, Sam. She had that rare quality of always exuding life. There was a real warmth about her, a knowing that there were certain things in life more important than what you could own, or buy. Very much like your Nonna, my Victoria."

He extended his hand with a sweeping motion to Sam's parent's house next door. "We were all shocked that you two broke up. We were sure that you two were going to have a happy marriage and bring us grandchildren...and great grandchildren."

Gio noticed Sam gaze into the garden ever so slightly nodding his head.

"What brings up Tina after so many years, Sam?"

"A few weeks ago, she came out to Durango and spent almost a week with me", replied Sam.

Gio gagged as he was sipping his wine. Clearing his throat, "That's a surprise! What brought that about?" he said with a grin.

"You know that bar I play my guitar in once in a while?"

Gio nodded.

"Out of the blue one night, the bartender hands me a glass of wine and says it's from someone that I used to sing to. I looked down the bar and there she was."

Sam paused and looked at Gio who was leaning on the arm of the chair. He had his chin resting in his palm staring at him.

"Don't stop now, Sam. It's getting interesting."

Grinning, Sam continued. She had been through some rough times with her marriage. Evidently, her husband left her for a young woman almost 2 years ago. It left her pretty shaken. She hasn't had much luck with men since then, and her mom suggested looking me up. What are you smiling at?"

"Amazing! After all those years. And you spent a week together you say?"

"Almost."

"When you mean together...do you mean together?" Gio asked with raised eyebrows and sly grin.

"Yes, Gio." Sam's grandfather always loved to kid people. "We were together."

"What now? What about Lynda?" asked Gio.

"That's why I'm here, Gio. I don't know what to do. Damn. It took me what seemed like forever to get over Tina so many years ago."

Interrupting with a raised, crooked finger Gio said with a grin, "You deserved the pain. You hurt her...and your baby."

"You're probably right."

"Of course I'm right."

"Gio, are you going to let me finish?"

With his wine glass, Gio motioned. "Please. Go ahead. I'm enjoying this."

"Lynda has been so good to me. She's never demanded anything. No commitment. No promises. She's been a great companion."

"And now you feel guilty?" asked Gio.

"Perhaps."

"How far has your relationship with Lynda gone, Sam?"

That was the beauty about talking to Gio. You could talk to him about anything. He was a wise man who had lived a big life, and never got embarrassed talking about it.

"I haven't slept with her, Gio. A couple of times we necked, but that was it"

Smiling, Gio nodded at Sam. "Wow, you have great will-power. Lynda is a young beauty. I'm proud of you for having the discipline."

"Well, it hasn't been easy."

"It never is. But, it is the right thing to do. I had trouble convincing all my grandchildren this. So, why haven't you taken your relationship further and asked her to marry you?"

Sam took a drink of wine. Stalling to think of an answer, he swished it in his mouth for 5 seconds and then let it roll down the inside of his right cheek like Gio instructed so many years ago. "Cause I know she wants more children...and I don't know if I can do that...especially at my age."

Gio knew that wasn't what Sam was feeling. Years ago on their trip to Italy, they were sitting in the piazza of St. Ambrogia, Gio's old family church. They were just watching the people in quiet splendor. Out-of-the-blue Sam told Gio about Tina being pregnant and how he didn't want her to have the baby. Gio was the only person that Sam had ever confided in.

"Haah. What do you mean at your age? You're what...40? I was 40 when your uncle Lorenzo was born? It was a great day then just as it was when your father was born, when I was 21. What is it really, Sam?"

"I don't know if it's..." Sam's reply just trailed off.

Gio set the glass down on the table in front of them and then leaned over towards Sam. He gently put his sun darkened, craggy hand on his grandson's knee.

"Sam, you can't do that anymore. You've been punishing yourself for almost 20 years. It's time to stop. It's time to give yourself a chance to be happy with someone again."

A tear ran down Sam's right cheek. "I don't know if I deserve a family after what I've done."

"Sam, I know you're sorry for what you asked Tina to do long ago. More importantly...God knows you're sorry. You've told him. You've asked for forgiveness. If he can forgive you in all of His perfection, it's time for you to forgive yourself."

Sam took a deep breath and nodded. Maybe it was time, he thought.

Gio sat back, placing both of his arms on the chair's armrests. "How did you and Tina leave it, Sam?"

"We agreed to take a few weeks away from each other. We didn't want to rush into anything...especially after all these years. She finally called me a few days ago and said that she would really like to see me and talk.

Gio nodded. "I'm assuming you spoke to Lynda about Tina's visit?"

Sam shifted in his chair. "Yeah. She was pretty understanding. She said that I owe it to myself to see if that's what I want. It wasn't too surprising considering it was Lynda. She's like that, Gio. She's quite a lady."

"She's sounds like it and I know you don't want to hurt either one of them, Sam. Unfortunately, one of them is going to be disappointed."

Gio paused looking at his grandson. It was obvious Sam was struggling.

"I know", agreed Sam as he looked down at his hands between his knees.

"Sam, how did you feel when you were with Tina after all this time? Were you happy knowing that she was close by? Can you still talk about what's important to both of you in life, and have it in common? Did she send your heart racing when you saw her in that bar after all of those years? Did she still feel like part of you when you lay next to her? Do you miss her in the morning when you wake up without her?"

Sam raised his head and looked at Gio. "Yeah. I do, but how do I know she wants me after all this time?"

Sam looked down at his hands again. "I know how Lynda feels."

Gio loved his grandson so much. He had become quite the man over the years, confident about every aspect of his life...except maybe women. Gio had not known Sam to be serious about any woman, no matter how long he may have dated them.

"Sam, don't be scared. You may be experiencing what very few people ever get a chance to do?"

Sam looked at his grandfather with scrunched eyebrows like he didn't understand. "What's that?"

"A second chance", answered Gio.

### Chapter 27

### Surfing Again

As soon as Tina gave Sam her address, he immediately went on-line to find directions. She was playful and mysterious when he asked, "Can you give me directions?"

The map directed him to Sunset Beach, near where he and Jay used to surf. When did she move there, he wondered?

It was a good feeling to be driving through Belmont Shore on the way to PCH again. There were new storefronts in place of old ones since he was last through a few years ago.

As he drove over the Belmont Bridge just before making the turn south on PCH he caught a glimpse of the Long Beach marina. He loved seeing all the sailboat masts. It brought back a lot of good memories from his youth around here.

I guess it will always be home, he thought.

He started his way south through Seal Beach and thought of Lynda. She was a special lady. Nothing seemed to frazzle her. He knew that raising Siera alone couldn't be easy and yet Lynda never complained. Even when she spoke about her young husband getting killed, she was calm. And now this. Sam could still remember what she said to him.

"Sam, you know I love you. I may not like your decision, but I know you'll make the right one. I don't want you unless you're sure. I've known for a long time that something in a past romance scarred you. I didn't know what it was until you told me about Tina's pregnancy. If you think she could heal that scar...I'd be happy for you."

The traffic was still light in the early afternoon and the time between Seal Beach and Surfside went by very fast. Sam saw the familiar water tower that someone converted to a house long ago at the corner of Anderson Street. He made a right turn and then a quick left on South Pacific Avenue. As he counted down the addresses, he was surprised to see how close her house was to the place where the grocery store had the Labor Day picnic so many years ago. Based on the address number, he realized she was on the sand side of the street. He found a parking space just down about 30 yards from the little side street that took you to the beach and to the row of houses fronting the sand.

As he walked up the side street towards the sand, Sam started to hear the distant sound of crashing waves on the shore. All those years away from the ocean and the sound of the surf on the sand still excited him.

Tina's house should be to the left, he thought. He wondered how long she had lived here at the beach. This was high priced real estate and he didn't get the impression that she was that well off.

Sam walked up to the gate and smiled. She bought Fred's house?

It was definitely the same house used as the picnic base by the grocery store long ago, but it looked fresher...more kept up. The walkway from the gate still separated the yard in two; however, the slightly raised deck on the left was now accessible to the inside of the house by a beautiful set of French doors. The grass yard on the right had beautiful flower beds around the perimeter fence just starting to fill out with a bit of green. A surfboard lay on the grass near the side flowers.

He knocked at the door and waiting, he naturally looked to the ocean. One solitary surfer was out braving the cold water, but by the looks of the waves it appeared like it was worth it.

"You made it!" Tina opened the door and put her arms around him immediately. She looked at him smiling from ear to ear.

Time froze while her azure eyes burned into him. He no longer heard the surf or felt the slight Santa Ana wind. All he could take in was her. Her hair was piled on top of her head in that loose way that he used to find so sexy. She wore faded blue jeans and a chamois colored, long sleeve button down shirt. It was almost the same straw color as her hair.

His arms went easily to her waist. It felt like it always had. "You know I've missed you every day since you left Durango" said Sam.

Tina's face lit up. "No, I didn't know...but I hoped so."

She paused. She had to let everything sink in. Could the mistakes of the past somehow be erased for a new beginning? She looked at him with earnest.

Breaking the silence and not wanting to dive in quite yet, Sam asked "Did you buy this place? It's Fred's, isn't it?

"You remember? I didn't know if you would?"

Sam chuckled, "How could I forget. You patched up my head with a bandage after my surfboard conked me."

Tina nodded in agreement. "That's right. Come on in and let me show you around. I just made a pot of coffee."

The old hippy beach house was now grown up. It was still cozy, but the décor was more polished and definitely had a woman's touch...a very nice touch. The cabinets were all new in the kitchen. The faucet over the sink was modern, tall and arching.

Tina poured the coffee and fixed it with the appropriate amount of cream for both of them.

"So, how long have you been here, Tina?"

"Bring your coffee outside on the deck. It's kind of a long story."

The patio table made a nice vantage point for the sand and distant ocean.

"Well, you remember Fred. He started falling on hard times a few years after you left town. He got hooked on cocaine and started piling up debt. He barely made it to work half of the time and his health really started to go downhill. I was his only friend after a while. He needed a lot of money badly and told me that he was going to have to sell his house. He felt bad about it because his grandmother gave it to him, remember?"

Sam nodded while drinking his coffee.

"Well, I told him that if he agreed to get help for his habit, I'd loan him the money. So, I used the college money that my parents set aside for me and set up a mortgage on his house." Tina got a little somber. "Fred never did go to counseling. A few years later, he OD'd freebasing."

"What a waste" said Sam. "He was such a nice guy."

"Yeah, he was. He had no family and since I held the note on the house, he left it to me in his will."

"Wow, what a story" said Sam looking around the living room. "Did you live here while you were married?"

"No, we lived closer to mom in Long Beach. It was easy to rent. So, I kept it."

Sam nodded with happiness. "I always liked this place, Tina. You've done a nice job fixing it up."

"Thanks."

Tina couldn't wait anymore. Enough small talk, she thought. She got up and took a few steps into the yard.

The quiet was deafening. Sam asked, "Are you ok?"

She turned. "Sam, did you really miss me since I left?" There was earnest in her eyes.

He smiled ever so slightly. Setting his coffee down on the side table, he got up and walked to within an arm's length. "It was hard to think of anything else. I kept reliving the week we had together over and over just to keep your memory alive."

"That week wasn't just a fleeting chance to relive some good old memories? Was it, Sam?"

Sam reached out to both of her hands and held them in his. He thought of Gio.

"Tina, do you believe in second chances?"

She smiled at him. "I want to believe in this one."

He paused and looked into her azure eyes. Were they watery, he wondered?

"Tina, I can never take away the hurt that I caused you so many years ago. I can't even imagine what you went through...when you...you know. I didn't even have the guts to go and comfort you, if it was even possible."

It was becoming hard for Sam to speak. That familiar lump was in his throat. The last time he felt it, he was asking Tina to marry him on that Christmas Eve so long ago. His vision was blurring from the tears welling up in his eyes.

"I almost don't think I have the right to ask you this, but I'd like to spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you. And if you say "Yes", I'll thank you every day for being my wife."

She squeezed his hands. Could this all be happening? Really?

She started to fall for him on this very beach over twenty years ago. She fell in love with him on their first date just down the coast from here a few miles, and from that point in time...she thought they'd always be together. Then, it fell apart on that awful night and her life changed forever...turning out to be nothing like she had thought. Largely, an unloving marriage that ended in her husband cheating on her and only one child that she treasured. And now, this wonderfully sweet moment. Could her life return to the path that she had wanted so many years ago?

"Oh, Sam, if you only knew how much this means to me, but...I need to know something else." She stepped in closer. Putting her hand on his chest, she started to rub his shirt. "I don't want to remarry if there isn't at least a chance of having another child, even at my age. How do you feel about that?"

He took a deep breath. "Tina, I don't know if God would bless us, let alone trust me to have another opportunity. But, if he did bless us...I would love to have a baby with you."

Tina lunged at him and held him tight and close. Nothing was said for about 10 seconds. Finally, she let him go and backed away holding his hands.

Tina smiled at him. "Sam, luckily He always forgives...And He's already blessed us...we're going to have a baby in late October."

Everything around him became a blur. The nearby houses had no distinct lines, colors blended together, sounds of the waves and seagulls stopped. It was stone quiet. Did he hear her correctly? Was it possible? Why did God show him favor to be lucky enough to find Tina again and then the greatest gift of all...a child?

"Did you hear me?" she asked, smiling.

He shook his head to clear his mind. The sounds came back. The houses were in focus again.

"Yeah, I did. I was just thinking how fortunate I am right now...and after all those years of guilt."

"Sam, I think it's time for you to really wash away that guilt. You've carried it long enough. When was the last time you surfed?

He looked at her with a peculiar, questioning look.

"It's been quite a while and as much as I would like to do some surfing, I'm not sure if I want to just now. I'm still reeling from not only finding you again, but being able to start over with a baby."

Sam smiled at her with a questioning look. "Besides...why would surfing wash away the awful thing I made you do? I know now that it consumed me. It's the reason why I couldn't be happy with another woman."

She reached up and brushed the hair off his forehead. Gently smiling at him, she said, "Go out for a bit." She pointed to the board on the grass. "You can borrow Matt's spare board and wet suit."

"What is it you want to tell me?" he asked.

"This one time you can forget the past, Sam, because there never was a reason to feel guilty."

She pointed to the lone surfer. "That's Matt...my pride and joy. He's the reason I got up every morning and thanked God every day for living."

She turned back to Sam. "He's your son, Sam. I never went through with the abortion. I cried the entire night before. I knew I was going to do a horrible thing and kept asking God to help me. After I drove up to the clinic, I sat in my car for a few minutes with the window down trying to catch my breath. My heart was racing and I felt like I couldn't breathe. Then, I heard a child giggle. I looked up and saw a mother pushing her little daughter in a stroller along the sidewalk. The mother was glowing with happiness as she listened to her child laugh. That was all it took. No matter what anyone told me about it not being a baby, I knew it was lies. I started my car, drove away, and never looked back. Matt's been the best thing that ever happened to me."

Tina smiled at Sam. She was glowing like he'd never seen a woman glow before. "Now, I want you to know what a great kid he is. Go ahead," she nodded towards the water. "He knows about you. I told him that you never knew I was pregnant, and that I went away because I wanted my baby. When you get back in, we'll tell him together about our marriage and his new sister or brother."

While Sam put on the spare wetsuit, Tina explained why she never told him about Matt. No one knew, but her family. She never told them about Sam's request for an abortion. Somewhere in her heart, she didn't believe he was thinking clearly and chalked it up to youthful, selfishness. They all agreed to abide by her request to keep his father's name a secret. She didn't want to burden Sam, and figured he wasn't interested in being a father anyway. So, she moved to Kansas City with her sister and brother-in-law a few months after she and Sam split up. She figured that she could stay there long enough to have her baby and stabilize herself before moving back to California.

* * *

It had been a day to remember for Sam. In one fell swoop, he got back the love of his life, and found out he was going to be father to a new baby. More importantly, he realized what a waste the last twenty years had been. Out of selfishness, he turned his back on his own child. Because of this selfish act he hurt from constant guilt during all those years. Twenty years that he could have not only been happily married to Tina, but knowing and loving his own son.

Sam paddled in a straight line towards his son. He was within 10 yards, now. How was Matt going to react? Would he resent him? How long would it take for them to get to know each other? He pulled up alongside about 4 feet between them. Matt looked over at him with no emotion on his face...just azure blue eyes burning into Sam.

A couple of seconds passed and then Matt smiled. "It took you long enough to paddle out."

Sam nodded. "Better late than never."

"You're right about that." Just then Matt turned his board towards shore and started paddling. "Here comes a good one."

The wave rolled by Sam and caught up to Matt paddling. It gently lifted the back of his board upward and he started slipping down the face.

As Matt disappeared, Sam heard him. "I'll be right back, Dad."

The phone rang while Tina was sitting on the deck drinking coffee and watching her boys. She smiled as she watched them sitting near each other talking...every once in a while taking the time to slip down the face of a wave.

"Hello" she answered. There was a pause. "Yeah, you were right about second chances. Thanks, Gio."

The End
