[Inaudible] Good morning.
Afternoon and evening for everybody
who is online today with me.
Thank you for joining me. For
those of you who don't know me,
I'm Dr. John Demartini
and I'm going to share
the amazing power of the method
that I've developed over the years.
I'm going to start off by saying
that when I was 18 years old and I
was learning how to read, because
I had learning problems as a child,
my uncle sent me a giant
couple crates of books to
my home. And two of the
books that were sent,
one was by the Nobel
prize winner, Paul Dirac,
and it was on particle physics.
He was the one who founded the idea
of particles and antiparticles being
balanced initially in the universe.
And then there was also one by Gottfried
Wilhelm Leibniz or Leibniz, who
wrote a book called the
Discourse on Metaphysics.
And when I read the Discourse
on Metaphysics, he said
in the very first chapter,
first paragraph, that there was
a perfection in the universe,
a magnificence in the universe
that few people ever get to know,
but those that do their lives are
changed and transformed forever,
for the rest of their
life. When I read that,
somehow it brought a tear to my eye.
I'm sure you've had a moment when you've
read something or heard something or
viewed something that brought
a tear of inspiration to you.
I couldn't quite put my finger
on or grasp what it was,
but I just knew that I knew that there
was something there that I wanted to go
and explore. And I've used since I was 18,
that tear of inspiration as a
guidance to kind of navigate through
life of what I want to study and
learn and what I was going to do,
because it gave me an insight about
when I'm authentic. When I'm authentic,
I get that tear of
inspiration as a confirmation.
And when I'm pursuing something that's
clear and I'm trying to put a puzzle of
life together, that's a
very powerful, useful tool.
After reading that, I went on a pursuit
to try to find this quote "perfection",
this divine perfection as he called it,
he was a mathematician and
philosopher and theologian.
When I read Paul Dirac's
book on particle physics,
and I saw that there's for every
particle, there was an anti particle,
and that if you join them together,
a particle and anti particle,
a positron and electron, or
any particle and anti particle,
you birth light. And in my naivety
at the time, I thought, wow,
if particle and anti particle,
complementary opposites
could be synthesized,
because one's a thesis,
one's an antithesis,
if they could be synthesized
synchronously and birth light,
I wonder what would happen if I was to
put the positive and negative experiences
of our life and emotions in our
life, happy, sad, kind, cruel,
all pairs of opposites, if they were
to be synthesized synchronously,
could I birth enlightenment?
And could I discover the hidden
order in the apparent chaos?
I went on a pursuit and I
started studying physics and
chemistry and mathematics and
psychology and brain research.
And it took me to every
ology that you could study.
And I found common threads to
these different disciplines.
Will Durant said that there was a
dialectic sitting in every field.
And I found that to be true.
A dialectic means a thesis
and antithesis synthesis,
opinions and opposite opinions joined
together to make more objective truth.
I started to pursue
psychology, brain research, and
as I went along,
I started to realize that every time we
perceive something and judge something
as positive or negative, they were
always birthed out of contrast.
Wundt, W U N D T who was a psychologist
at the time, way back, William
James, over 100 and something
years, 125 years ago,
said that there was a study of psychology
that led to the realization that there
was always opposition and
synchronicities of opposites,
he called it the law of contrast.
And Heraclitus in the fifth century
BC mentioned the same
thing and many people,
many philosophers through the ages
mentioned this. And this stuck in my mind,
because it seemed to show
up in chemistry, in physics,
in math and everything else I found,
trying to balance the equation
in mathematics, balance
the chemistry in physics,
balance the nuclear
physics, balance everything,
I thought somehow there's an
inherent objective balancing
mechanism going on in the brain. The
research was pointing to it. Contrast with
sensory systems.
I realized that when I was thrown
off from being centered in life,
and I was infatuated with something,
I was conscious of the upsides
and unconscious of the downsides.
And when I was resentful to something,
I was conscious of the downsides,
unconscious of the upsides. But when
I saw both sides simultaneously,
I was neither up nor down, I was centered.
And I was neither shamed when I was
infatuated with others or proud when I
was resenting others, I was
authentic. And I thought, okay,
this is the first principle that I want
to incorporate into what I'm going to
call the Demartini Method. Originally,
it was called the Retro Genesis Process,
later it was called the Collapse Process
based on quantum physics and collapsing
the wave function by Schrödinger.
Then it was called the collapse,
I guess they call it the
Demartini Collapse Process.
Eventually I realized that
that was confusing people,
and I just turned it to
The Demartini Method,
everybody just started
calling it that anyway.
And so I started to put
two principles together.
I realized in myself that whenever
I was judging somebody and
criticizing somebody, looking down
on somebody, if I was really honest,
I found out that the thing I was judging
them for was something I was actually
feeling ashamed about.
And I was judging and pointing my finger
out at them and actually three of them
were pointing back at me. You
know, it's the old problem that,
pluck the mote out of your own eye before
you pluck it out of somebody else's
and look inside yourself before
you look at others that way.
And I decided to go to the
dictionary, the Oxford dictionary,
which is the biggest dictionary
I could find at the time,
the smallest little prints,
thinnest little paper,
most comprehensive dictionary.
And I went through every human
behavioral trait that I could find
that a human being could display.
And I circled each behavior
as I went down the page,
this is a long project here.
And as I came across the word that
described a trait that I would
consider a human behavior, some action
or inaction or trait or behavior,
I then thought of who is it that I know
that displays that trait to the most
extreme example. And I put
their initials out there.
And then I thought to myself, kind
of where, and when do I display that?
And I looked inside my life and really
reflected cause reflective awareness,
which is self-inspection,
introspection is one of the
greatest awareness we have,
it's what distinguishes us
from the animals in a sense,
there is a non-reflective
consciousness and,
non reflective consciousness is
observant of the world around you,
like an animal can see the environment,
but he can't see itself
look at the environment,
but self-reflective awareness is
being able to look at yourself in the
environment, looking at the environment.
And I looked at myself and I realized
that the individuals that I had imagined
being the most extreme example, I looked
for where and when I displayed that,
and it was not hard to see, I,
I realized that I actually did and
did display those same behaviors.
And I went through, believe
it or not 4,628 traits.
And I discovered I had them all. I was
nice at times. I was mean at times,
I was kind at times, I was cruel at
times, I was considerate, inconsiderate,
thoughtful, thoughtless, peaceful,
wrathful, nice, mean, kind, cruel,
considerate, inconsiderate.
I was honest, dishonest.
I was putting on with pride and
arrogance and then shame and humbleness.
And I went through and I found out that
I did every one of them at different
moments in my life, if I was really
honest and I didn't want to be honest,
I wanted to put on the proud face and
pretend like I had gotten rid of some,
I actually was bought into at that
early stage, that self-improvement,
that I was going to get rid of half
of myself and get only one sidedness.
It wasn't until age 30 that I
finally realized that was futile.
I realized that everything that
I thought I'd gotten rid of,
I realized I still surfaced and I was
repressing it, and then it would explode.
When I finally realized, I realized
it's better to just own the traits.
It's interesting how we want
to be loved for who we are,
and yet we're trying to get rid of half
of ourselves and we want to love other
people, but we want to
get rid of half of them.
And we want to love the world and
want to get rid of half of it.
And that's just absolute
idiocy when you think about it,
you're not going to do it. And I found
out that I never got rid of a trait.
I never really gained a trait cause I
traced those traits all the way back to my
childhood and I continued to have them.
And I realized that
these biological traits,
these behaviors were absolutely essential
and there was a biologic reason for
them. I realized that I needed kind and
cruel at different signs because when my
values, my hierarchy of values were
supported, I was nice, a pussycat.
When my values were
challenged, I was cruel.
And I needed both of those because
life has both support and challenge.
Maximum growth and development occurs
at the border of support and challenge.
Ordering and chaos,
living at the edge of chaos is one of
the principles in evolutionary biology.
When I finally realized
that I put together the very
first phase of the Demartini Method.
That was where you make a list of
every trait action or inaction that
you can admire or despise about somebody.
And you make sure that
that list is balanced,
because our first assumption is that
there's way more negatives than positives,
or way more positives than negatives
or whatever, resentful, or infatuated,
but this is holding you accountable.
Accountable is able to bring a balance
sheet to your mind and being accountable
to see that balance.
So I made myself look at
where the individual that I'm
disliking for instance,
and I'd rattled off all the
negatives about them that I dislike,
I gotta go find as many positives of
that. And when I looked, I found them,
I had just chosen not to look.
I had a subjective bias as a survival
mechanism to keep me from looking for the
both sides.
And I wanted to label the person and
archetype them instead of embrace them
as one and had all the traits in life.
And when I went and made
myself accountable to write
down both the positives and
the negatives that make sure
that those numbers were balanced,
and if I saw way more negatives, I
got to go look deeper, I found them,
I found that they were both sides.
And then I found out that
not only do I have them,
but so do the people around me.
And then I went and I looked at where
and when I displayed and demonstrated
those behaviors. Now, initially
it was kind of cursory.
I just looked at where did I do it and I
wasn't really precise. And I just know,
yeah, I've done it. But I, I now know,
go to exactly where it
was and when it was.
I now ask the individual
in the Demartini Method,
go to a moment where and when you perceive
this individual, pardon me, yourself,
display or demonstrate the same or
similar behavioral trait, action,
inaction that you despise,
or like admire most.
And go in there and identify
where it is, when it is,
to who it is and who's
perceiving you do that.
And that gets an episodic moment out
of your brain and locks in a neuro
associative complex, neurologically,
which is essential to transform the brain.
And I made myself accountable to
find what I saw in other people.
And the reason why I resented them is
because it was reminding me of something I
had done in the past
that I felt guilty about.
And I didn't want to deal with that and
I didn't like being around them because
they reminded me of me that I was judging.
And sometimes I was too proud
to admit what I saw in them,
inside me and I wanted to
avoid them and label them and
bias my perception of them instead of
look at the balance of them and see them
as an individual, I'd put a persona,
mask on them about who they are instead
of embrace them as a whole human being.
And when I was admiring somebody,
I was too humble to admit what I saw
in them was inside me, but I had it.
And that was very powerful cause then
I realized that whatever I admired in
them, in any human being, a
great hero or a great villain,
that I'm too proud to admit, by
God, I've got all that in me.
At the level of my soul, nothing's
missing in me, cause I'm not judging.
The soul is a state of unconditional
love. At the level of our senses,
things appear to be missing because we're
too proud or too humble to admit what
we see in others inside ourselves,
and those disowned parts,
those too proud or too humbled
personas that we have and the projected
personas we project onto
people are not really truths.
They're just our biases and those
biases weigh us down gravitationally,
keeps us in bondage.
Because anything we infatuate and resent
occupy space and time in our mind and
run us, irrespective of time or space,
we could be run by our emotions 20, 30,
40 years later, cause we never
resolved them, never balanced them.
And I realized that as
long as I'm infatuated,
cause I've had infatuation
I couldn't sleep at night,
it was preoccupying my mind.
Being resentful, where I
couldn't sleep at night,
preoccupying my mind.
Only when I centered myself and
brought myself into perfect balance,
synchronously,
that I was able to rest and actually get
centered and I required less sleep when
I found that, mastered that.
So I first made a list of all
the specific trait, actions,
inactions that this individual displayed
or demonstrated that I admired or
despised most.
Then I looked at where and when did I
display and demonstrate the specific
trait, action,
inaction in my own life and I'd level
the playing field and realize I was no
longer too proud or too humble to
admit what I see in them inside me.
And that was with the first level of
reflective awareness. And then I realized,
that as I honored myself,
how are you going to be loved for who
you are if you keep exaggerating and
minimizing yourself and you don't
even allow yourself to be yourself.
I found when I was myself, I was
grateful. I was inspired. I was loving.
I was present. I was
certain, I had inspiration,
and those were confirmations
of being authentic.
But as long as I was looking down on
somebody or looking up at somebody,
I wasn't being me. So that was the
first two steps of the Demartini Method.
Then I realized that the trait, action,
inaction that I initially admired
or despised that I thought had
upsides without downsides or
downsides without upsides,
where I split my consciousness into
conscious and unconscious halves,
the thing that I thought was
up, had downsides and the
thing I thought was down,
had upsides. I realized, and
I watched that in my clients,
if somebody would come
to me and say, 'Well,
my father was really cruel to me and mean
to me.' And then I found out that they
became entrepreneurs, capable
of being independent, resilient,
and adaptable and driven. And I found
out the other person said, 'Well,
my mother was very nice to me,
never cruel to me.' And then I realized
that you became dependent and then you
expected everybody to be like your mother.
And then you became juvenile and you
couldn't even ask questions to yourself,
you had to offload the responsibilities
onto mommy and you never grew up,
and I've seen men stay with their
mommies when they're 50 years old.
And I realized that nice is actually
mean and the mean has actual nice.
And I realized that those were
illusions that people were having.
And then I also realized the things that
we think are terrible a day, a week,
a month, a year or five years later,
we realized that there's some terrific
hidden in that, and we look back and go,
thank you, that, I didn't see it. But I,
I now have the wisdom of the ages
because of the aging process, but I can,
if I do the Demartini Method, have
the wisdom of the ages without it,
don't have to wait 20 years to find
out that the thing is a blessing.
Find the blessing by looking. The
quality of your life is based on
the questions you ask,
the Demartini Method is a
series of questions that
make you fully conscious and
make you aware of the unconscious part.
So your unconscious is always trying to
reveal to you the side you're ignoring,
your intuition is trying to do that.
So if you're infatuated with somebody
your intuition is trying to point out the
downsides, the part you're unconscious of.
And when you're resentful to somebody
it's trying to find out the meaning,
the upsides, so you're fully conscious
and the part you're unconscious of.
And so I realized that when I
look carefully and ask questions,
so go to a moment where and when you
perceive this individual displaying or
demonstrating a specific trait, action,
inaction that you admire or despise,
and what's the downsides of the thing
they admire and what's the upsides of
that, and made you accountable, hold
yourself accountable to see both sides.
The moment you do, they don't run you.
Instead of being extrinsically
driven as a victim of history,
you now become a master of destiny
and realize you have control over your
perceptions, decisions, and actions.
And that's very profound when you
finally be accountable and be objective.
Objective means neutral in that respect
and balanced and extracting meaning out
of the thing is finding the mean,
the balance between the polarities.
And so your life has meaning
every time you do that.
So I realized that this thing that
I thought was terrible in them,
that I resented, wasn't.
The thing that I thought was so
terrific that I was admiring, wasn't.
It was just an incomplete awareness.
And when I actually realized that
nobody's worth putting in pits,
nobody's worth putting on pedestals,
but everybody's worth putting in hearts
and have reflective awareness where I'm
not too proud or too humble to admit
what I see, and I see both sides of it,
and I'm balancing the equation.
In the first phase of the method I'm
balancing the equation between self and
other, the second I'm balancing
the idea of positive and negative,
in self and other.
And then I'm balancing out the
polarities of charged polarity.
It's called charged parity law
in conservation law in physics.
And then I realized, you know,
instead of me just judging them,
the real truth is I,
I watched the situation of my
resentment to somebody one time,
then I looked inside
myself where I'd done it.
And once I found the benefits where I had
done it to whoever I had done the same
behavior to, I found myself not resentful
to the individual. I realized that,
gosh, my resentment to myself,
my shame is actually causing me to resent
somebody else that's reminding me of
it. And I want to avoid them.
And I realized that our
impulses for pleasure and our
instincts from pain in our
amygdala is skewing our reality and
not allowing us to appreciate what's
actually there. And there's
something magnificent there,
there's a hidden order there,
there's a love there that
Leibniz was trying to say.
So I needed Paul Dirac's particle and
anti particle physics and mathematics to
help put this model together. But
I needed Leibniz to guide the path,
the dharmic path as the Buddha says,
towards something that had deep meaning.
As Victor Frankel says in the
concentration camps he found meaning,
when every body else
was dying, he survived.
He thrived instead of just survival.
Then I started to go in there and
identify wherever I had done the behavior,
look back of where and when I did it
and looked how it served or disserved,
if I was infatuated with myself and
proud, I looked at what was the downside.
So I calmed down my pride because if I
don't calm myself down and don't have
self-governance on my own
pride, I attract physiological,
psychological sociological or
theological events to humble me,
pride before the fall.
And if I don't do the opposite when I'm
shamed and look at the upsides of it,
I get again, physiological,
psychological things lift me up.
Nature's always trying to equilibrate,
Saint Augustin mentioned
that in his theology,
the will of God is equilibrium when the
will of man matches the will of God or
will of man and woman, humans,
match the will of God, is graced,
his life is graced, grateful. So I
started going there and look at where,
and when I did it and
helping my clients do that.
And then I realized that they were
carrying around shame and guilt and pride,
and those are all
personas. They're not real.
They're exaggerations or
minimizations of who we are.
And the magnificence who we are
as a total is far greater than any
fantasies or nightmares
we'll put on ourselves.
So as I started to neutralize it,
I noticed that as I knocked out all
my shames of all my guilts that I was
resenting in other people reminding me of,
I noticed my self worth went up and
I was willing to hold onto money,
hold on to, have fair exchange and not
give away stuff and I also noticed,
I was now willing to actually start
having money work for me instead of me
always working for it and buying
things to feel better about myself.
So that was a major breakthrough when I
finally realized that self-governance is
what my executive center in
the brain is trying to do,
is trying to mitigate the impulses and
instincts of the subjective biases and is
trying to wake me up to the magnificence
and the hidden order in my life.
Because all these things that
I'm doing and they're doing,
no matter what I've done, or no matter
what they've done, we're worthy of love,
and that's very powerful
when you finally get that.
That's what the Demartini Method's about,
to help you realize there's something
magnificent in your life and you don't
need fixing. You don't need
self-improvement. You don't need it.
You just need to wake up because you
only think you make a mistake when you
compare your actions to somebody
outside that you've given power to,
whose values that you've injected.
And you only think other
people make mistake when you
projected your values onto
them and expected them to live in your
values, they can't live in your values,
they live in their own. You can't
live in other people's values,
you live in your own. Then
I realized another thing,
I realized over time, that I heard
a lot of people label people.
My mother was always mean, never nice.
And I noticed cancer
patients had black and white,
all or none labels and language. I noticed
that all the way back when I was 24,
when I was working as the president of
the Cancer Prevention Control Association
in Houston, and I was going, wow,
the most primitive physiology,
the most extremophilic state of
brain and cellular physiology,
is an absolute extremes. And so I
thought, well, that's a subjective bias.
When an animal is out in the wild
it's camouflaging itself from others,
and it's being camouflaged by its prey
and predator. And in order to survive,
it has to have false positives, exaggerate
it in order to get the adrenaline up,
strong enough to chase the
prey and to avoid the predator.
So I realized that whenever I
hear people say all or nones,
I know they're under high survival mode.
And they're really literally polarizing
their view to all the way to infinity
over one and one over infinity, all
or none. And I realized that's not,
that's not,
there's no phenomenological world that
you can existentially touch that's
infinity. So when I hear
that, I knew that's a lie.
So I started to ask the question,
where is the other side?
Because if somebody is not always
nice, I've gone up to people and said,
'Would you consider yourself always nice
never mean, always kind never cruel,
always positive never negative, always
peaceful, never wrathful?' And they go,
'No.' They can't have certainty about
that, cause it's bullshit. And I say,
'You're always mean, never nice. Always
cruel, never kind, always wrathful,
never peaceful?' 'No.' 'If I said
to you sometimes you're nice,
sometimes you're mean, sometimes
you're kind, sometimes you're cruel,
sometimes you're positive, sometimes
negative, sometimes you're peaceful,
sometimes wrathful, would you believe
me?' And they go, 'Yeah.' I say, well,
you only have certainty about yourself
when you realize the two sides,
the balance of those, objectively, not
subjective biases that are survival,
but objective thrivals.
So I basically went in there and I
realized and started going and asking the
question,
go to a moment where and when you
perceive this individual displaying or
demonstrating the specific trait, action,
inaction that you admired
or despise most. Okay there.
Now who are they demonstrating
it to? Okay to you,
they're cruel to you or you know,
critical of you or something. Okay.
Now go to a moment where and when you
perceived the same individual displaying
or demonstrating the exact opposite
behavior to you, praising you.
And if they're critical about
the way you're managing money,
where are they praising
you about managing money?
I made people accountable
to look at examples in their
life that they overlooked
and pretend it didn't exist and
made them accountable to look,
and they discovered that the individual
that they had labeled as always
something, always positive, always
negative or whatever, weren't.
There were times when they were supportive
and times when they were challenging,
and times when they were kind
and times when they were cruel,
when you did things that supported
their values, they were kind,
when you did things that challenged
their values they were cruel.
And I'm that way, and you're that way,
and we are that way as a human being.
We have a set of values, if we get
supported, we can be pussycats.
If we get challenged strong
enough, we can be tigers.
We are not one sided individuals.
We're not personas, masks,
facades. We're a whole being. And I
want to be loved for a whole being.
I don't want to be loved for only
one side because I can't sustain it,
so I'm going to be
sitting in bipolar states.
And bipolar condition's a
byproduct of monopolar addiction,
the addiction to one sidedness
and our society and all your life,
your grandmother probably said, be nice,
don't be mean, be kind, don't be cruel,
and then she'd beat the hell out of
grandpa and was a hypocritic. So you're,
you're told one thing
that people live another,
and I'm not interested in
these moral hypocrisies,
I'm interested in human behavior and
how to master your freaking life.
And I'm not interested in all
that. I found that as Dirac said,
back when I was 18, he says, it's
not that we don't know so much.
It's we know so much that it isn't so.
We're taught the opium of the masses,
the fantasies that make us easily
controlled and governed into a
self depreciative state, striving for
an unattainable goal. The Buddha says,
the desire for that which is unobtainable
and the desire to avoid that which is
unavoidable is a source
of human suffering.
And so we've been told that all our life,
but I'm not interested in the fantasies
of traditions and conventions.
I'm interested in how
human behavior works.
I spent 47 freaking years working
on that. And I'm absolutely certain,
you're an objective being with both sides.
And it's a waste of time. And I mean,
a freaking waste of time to try to
get rid of half of yourself. And I,
and I have to pound that into people's
head in my Breakthrough Experience
because people are addicted to fantasies
and then they make nightmares out of
their life trying to be
something they can't,
expecting others to be something they
can't, expecting others to be one sided,
not going to happen.
When you finally embrace both sides and
see that the individual's got both sides
and balance the equation,
the labels go away.
And then you understand the individual
and you want to know them about their
values, because if you
know what their values are,
you can know what to expect from people.
Otherwise you're going to feel
betrayed, and they don't betray you,
you do with unrealistic
expectations of one sidedness,
expecting them to live in your values,
not their own, expecting to be one,
one sided creatures, which
isn't going to happen.
Not in a world that requires support
and challenge for maximum growth,
not going to occur. Then I
realized something 20 years ago,
something pretty profound.
One of the most profound realizations
of my life when I was studying cell
physiology, I started
studying redox reactions.
And I noticed that for every oxidation,
which is a loss of electrons to some
atom molecule or ion there's a gain
of an electron somewhere else, which is
a reduction. And one is an oxidation.
One's a reduction. And
redoxes occur simultaneous,
they're entangled like
particle and antiparticles,
and a light bulb went onto me.
And I realized that this is oxidative
phosphorylation is one of the mechanisms
of energy in the body and
life itself depends on it.
An excited atom has to go back to
a ground state to give us energy.
And I realized that's
what photons in the world,
that's what the sun is doing for us,
for cyanobacteria and up the food chain
all the way to the alpha predator.
And I realized that wow,
I latched onto an insight and I realized,
and I started for the
next couple of years,
I went on a research on myself again,
and I looked and all of a
sudden two things had popped;
something I wrote when I was 24 in my
'Illusional Basis of Man's Health and
Disease' text on how perceptions
are dealing with contrast,
Wundt's idea in psychology
that I read at 22, 23,
and all of a sudden this light
bulb just went on. I'm like, Oh,
I can't believe I missed this.
And I started to realize something
that in Neuron Magazine in 2016,
another discoverer found out about it.
This is 16 years later after I'd found it,
found out that there's memories and anti
memories and that there's electronic
and molecular chemical
balancing going on in the brain,
even though the pharmaceutical industries
have sold you a bill of goods and it's
a biochemical imbalance, the
freaking truth is that's not fact.
And it's not a causal relationship to
depression in psychiatry like they want to
sell you. You have perceptions, you
can change your chemistry in seconds,
in billisecond,
you can change your chemistry by changing
your perceptions and attitudes of
mind. This is what William James
was trying to say. And Wundt.
So I basically discovered something. I
realized that if I go to a moment where,
and when I perceive an
individual displaying or
demonstrating some behavioral
trait action, inaction, some specific
traits that I despise or admire,
and I get where it is, when it is,
and I get really present with it because
I realized that the conscious and
unconscious mind splits at
the moment of perception.
And if I get really
present in that moment,
at that exact moment and find
out where it was, when it was,
that I perceived it, and what
is the content of my perception?
What am I judging? And what's
the context, what's it about?
So they may be criticizing me
about my management of money,
how I spend money or manage
money. And in that moment,
if I look carefully at what they're doing,
and I look for the reflective
opposite, the complimentary opposite,
the exact opposite behavior
at that moment, lo and behold,
my mind has the answer to who
is doing the opposite to me,
it was a mind blowing realization.
I call it the Great Discovery because
it's the greatest discovery ever made in
psychology. And I realized that it's
either in reality or virtual reality,
it's one or many, male and female,
closer or distant, virtual or real.
And if it's done to you,
it's somebody other than you.
If it's done to somebody
other, it could be you.
That means that whatever's going on in
your life, there's a pair of opposites.
So if somebody is criticizing you,
there's somebody praising you,
but you're unaware of it. When
you're conscious of the criticism,
you're hurt and you feel angry.
If you're conscious of the praise,
you're pleased and you feel pleased. But
if you see both of them together side,
you realize that you're actually
being given a moment of love.
Love is a synthesis and synchronicity
of complementary opposites.
When you realize that that's all
that goes on, 24 hours a day.
We have what is called a stream of
consciousness as William James says,
and moment by moment, sliver by sliver,
every billionth of a second or whatever,
a trillionth of a second, there's a sliver
of conscious freezing you might say,
and we snapshot our reality and we
gather information and we create what is
called a neuro associative complex
in the brain from sensory input.
We then associate it with
previous experiences that
we have, and we create this,
you might call it a memory
or a moment of perception.
And in that moment, whatever the
content of that perception is,
the brain in order to neutralize the
chemistry is because of the excitation of
neurons. It has to balance it,
the chemistry or otherwise
it gets a runaway noise in
the brain, a cascading of,
of what they call brain noise.
What happens is the brain
creates a composite opposite
and becomes aware of the
opposite. And when I
finally realized that,
and I looked at that and I asked where
it was for two years, I did it on myself.
And I did hundreds and hundreds of cases,
thousands of cases of moments in my life,
where I saw what was going
on and where in my mind.
And when I did cases in rape and beatings
and torture and things of that nature,
when I had clients that had gone through
really quote, "traumatic experiences",
I found out that they dissociated and
created a composite opposite in their
brain to counterbalance the chemistry
in the brain in order to maintain
homeostasis. And so
they were dissociating,
while they're being beaten for instance,
they would go and imagine themselves
invincible, when they were in darkness,
they'd see light, they'd feel
like they're, they're constrained,
they'd see freedom and act like a bird
or a butterfly or fly or something.
And I watched these dissociative states,
the content of the dissociated state
was counterbalancing the state that they
were experiencing in
their so called trauma.
I also noticed in ecstatic drug use,
the ecstatic would create
paranoias of the opposite.
And I realized that the mind is
always maintaining pairs of opposites.
When I discovered that and proved that,
thousands of cases in my own life,
and then clinically working with clients,
I discovered what I think is one of
the greatest discoveries of human
psychology. And we live in a
zoology of psychologies, it's a zoo,
perpetrator, innocent victim model.
And so we are separating causalities
and blaming other people and no therapy
will ever be complete till cause
equals effect in space time.
And so what happens is I went in there
and I went in and identified exactly
where it was when it was, what it
was, content context, who it was to,
and I looked for the other
side and I found it every time.
I found it was either real or virtual,
but I found that it was
complimentary opposites. And man,
I got tears of gratitude and I saw the
same thing I got when I got with Leibniz
when I was 18 and I just went wow, this,
this is too profound not to
share. It's just too profound.
And then I started clinically
working with people with my method
more and more.
And I put it into the Breakthrough
Experience where I begin to teach people
this. And the Breakthrough
Experience I've done 1,107 times,
to try to get this message out to
people because people are caught in this
fantasy and opium of quote
"self-improvement" and get
rid of half yourself and
try to be one sided in this moral
constrained hypocrisy that we live in.
And we subject ourselves to traditions
and conventions that are antiquated,
and aren't really human behavior
at its highest, highest and finest.
And when I finally put that into
place and put that in the Breakthrough
Experience, I watched
transformations in people's lives.
I saw people see things they never
saw before and all of a sudden,
when they saw the pairs of
opposites, their heart opened,
and I realized that love is truly a
synthesis and synchronicity of any
complimentary opposites. So whatever
you perceive, the opposite's there,
and when you're doing
something to somebody,
I looked again and when you were
mean to somebody who was nice,
when you were nice, who was mean,
when you're rejecting
somebody who is wanting them,
when you're stealing something who was
being generous, when you were generous,
who was being stealing?
I blew people's minds by making them
aware and show them that their intuition
always has that answer. We have
what is called sensory awareness.
Then we have an intuitive, noospheric
awareness, and most people,
I call it the imminent mind
and the transcendent mind
or the lower mind and the
higher mind, or the unreflective mind,
the pre reflective mind
and the reflective mind,
depending on who you want
to read their writings of.
And I realized that we have access to
vast amount of knowledge and can find the
hidden order in the chaos. When I was 18,
I also read Boltzmann's work and
Einstein's on a Brownian movement.
And I thought he never was satisfied
with the idea of it just random systems.
I always believed that randomness was
just not knowing all the variables and all
factors as Pascal described in his work.
So I basically sat there and I tried to
find the hidden order in the apparent
chaos. And by God, when
I found six and 13,
columns 6 and 13 of the Demartini Method,
and I found these synchronicities of
opposites, I found a goldmine. And man,
it's hard,
it's hard not to share that with
people because they run their life
as victims of history.
Instead of masters of destiny,
they think there's chaos and their life
is burdened and they don't see life on
the way they see it in a way.
But when I show them this,
they realize there's nothing there
out of order. They're graced,
they have meaning, they find the mean,
the pairs of the pairs of opposites
joined. And there's enlightenment.
There's an aha. There's an inspiration.
There's a metaphysical jump.
There's a, there's a, a true spirituality.
Spirituality is not a tribal thinking
and not an anthropomorphism of some
religious dogma that's antiquated set
up on Ptolemy's and Aristotle's view of
the world with primum mobiles, that's
antiquated. Spirituality has no race,
creed, color, age, or sex
limitations. It's transcendent.
It has no local language
monoglotic constructs.
Its massively more vast than that. And,
and I feel that we no matter what your
background is, what your tradition is,
there's a way now of discovering
the magnificent intelligence of
the universe, the pan
psychic intelligence,
the implicate order as
David Bohm would describe
in the universe, by asking
the right questions.
The quality of your life is based on
the quality of the questions you ask,
cause questions make you
conscious of the unconscious.
And then I went one step
further on the next column.
And I I realized that as long as we
were comparing our life to a fantasy of
one sidedness, we aren't
gonna appreciate our life.
So I had to crack the fantasies and
the nightmares that it was leading to.
So what I did is I said,
go to the moment where and when you
perceive this individual displaying or
demonstrating the specific trait, action,
inaction that you admire or despise.
Let's say you despise. And at that moment,
if they have done just the opposite
of what you thought they did,
that you despised and you admired that,
what would have been the drawback?
And I make them go into that moment.
So that's where the moment where their
intuition can answer that question
without speculation. And go in
there, what would be the drawback?
And when they answer that, they
go to the drawbacks of that.
They break the fantasy of how it could
and should have been, cause the could,
should, and would have been's or whatever
is interfering with the way it is.
Anytime you compare your reality to
a fantasy of how it should have been,
you're not grounded in reality.
What it is, is what it is.
How does that serve you? How
is what's happening right now,
fulfilling your life? Not how has it,
how is it should be like it used to be,
or should be like I want it to be, or
fantasize about it, but how is it worth?
By cracking the fantasies,
which is Column 14 in the Demartini
Method and the nightmares,
because when we're admiring somebody,
if we were actually
frightened of it's opposite,
if we found the benefits of the opposite,
we not only dissolve the infatuation.
Cause when we infatuate with people,
we minimize ourselves and then try
to live in their values and then self
depreciate.
So infatuations are just as devastating
to mastery of life as resentments.
And both of them occupy
your mind and run you.
So I clear those in the last columns.
And those are the first 14
columns of the Demartini Method.
There's about 70 columns
in this whole method,
I'm not going to take the time to go
through all, but those are the main ones.
And then I went on further and I
realized that there's another eight comms
dealing with gain and loss.
I realized that we only perceive
loss of things we infatuate with.
And we only perceive gain of things
we, when we're infatuated with it,
but if we all of a sudden aren't
infatuated with something,
we don't fear it's loss. See if
we're infatuated with somebody,
we fear they're going to leave us.
If we're resentful to somebody we fear
they're going to come close to us.
If we're resentful to somebody,
we hope they leave us.
We look forward to leaving us. We're
not, we're not frightened of that.
And when we're resentful to somebody,
when we're not resentful to somebody,
we don't have a fear
of them coming near us.
So we're going to be run by
external worlds by when we judge.
So I developed further
in another eight columns,
how to dissolve grief and relief and
how to dissolve these infatuations and
resentments and how to realize
nothing's missing in your life.
And I've taught that now I've taken three,
no 3,576 people who've
lost loved ones and shown
them how to dissolve grief.
And it's an average about one hour,
one hour and 15 minutes to two hours,
max of three hours. And it's
a science, it's reproducible.
It's been studied now at
Keio University in Japan.
It's been demonstrated in hundreds, and
hundreds, thousands of cases. And man,
anyway, that's another
eight columns plus 14,
that's 22 columns right there
of human transformation and it's
profound. And when you're done with it,
all you can sit is sit in awe with a
tear in your eye. You'll have gratitude.
You'll have love. You'll be inspired.
You'll be thankful. You'll feel certain.
You'll be present. And you realize it was,
there was a hidden order in the
apparent chaos, a magnificence.
And this is what Leibniz was saying.
My dream of finding that thing,
that Leibniz said,
that sense that I was destined to find
that and be one of those people to do
that. Once I found a science to
that, and now I can share that,
there's no human being
that can't have that.
There's no human being that can't have
the ability to see both sides and see the
synchronicities of opposites
and be grateful for their life.
Everything is ultimately on the way.
I really believe that the universe has
panpsychically intelligent and doing what
it can to assist us in doing
something magnificent with our life,
to help us live authentic and inspired
lives. And some people think, well,
that's crazy, because they're victims.
They want to run the story
and they want to blame things.
I've never seen blame of an external
source causing you whatever this
delusion you have. And some heroes,
some fantasy individual, some,
some saviour on the outside
to save you, a magic bullet,
like the magic bullet in
medicine. Those are bullshit.
They're not what makes it happen. The
hero out there is not outside you.
The villain out there is not outside
you. They're completely inside you.
And they're not even
really heroes and villains.
They're two parts of your nature that
you must have in order to master your
life. Anyway, I could go on for longer,
but I just wanted to share
the magnificence of that
and a little bit of the
development of the method
that I've now taken thousands,
literally tens and tens of
thousands of people through.
And I hope to share that with you live
so you can get to see yourself cause once
you learn it, you'll realize it's not
something you're going to throw away.
You're going to put this into your
life and use it over and over again.
And we've got a new app that's
soon going to be released about it,
but please find a way
of coming and learning,
come to the Breakthrough Experience
or whatever to learn how to put it in
operation, because this is a very
powerful tool. It's real true science.
I've worked very hard on it
for 47 years and it works.
It freaking works and it's
revolutionizing psychology. It is.
And it deserves to,
because of what's going on in psychology
and in psychiatry is not doing the job,
but now we have something that can. So
I just wanted to share that with you.
I hope you have a wonderful day and
you may have to watch this a few times.
I probably spoke a lot faster
than you wanted, but I just,
I just wanted to share that because
it's my life's work. And so that,
but that's the 22 sections out of
about 70 or so more columns that I put
together on every,
I'd want to find the solutions
to mastering life and the
human behavior. And I,
and I know this is something that
you're going to put into your life,
It's going to be helpful to you.
So thank you for spending time with me
and being with me on this particular
presentation, The Amazing
Power of The Demartini Method.
So I look forward to seeing you at
the next little gathering we have,
conversation that I get to share. Okay.
Have a super incredible day and think
deeply about what I said and find a way of
learning how to do the method.
It will change your life.
Thank you for joining me
for this presentation today.
If you found value out
of the presentation,
please go below and please
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I look forward to our next presentation.
Thank you so much for joining me.
[Inaudible].
