- [George] I'm-a try vegan food and people of the Internet
are gonna get angry at me.
- [Ryan] *laughs* Whatever I've had has always been horrible.
- [George] The consistency of the food is gonna make me go, "Nope!"
- [Niamh] So, I think I'll just be able to, like,
kind of - smell the lentils off... off it?
- [Leather Jacket Guy] Those taste buds are...
They're hardwired!
- [George] Let's figure this out!
- [Niamh] I think this is cow, and I think this is "non-cow".
- [LJG] Everything's thicker, isn't it?
W-when it's - *imitates animal noise*
When you've used an animal.
- [Ryan] That looks like it came through... a teat.
- [LJG] Mr. Moo-Moo, yeah?
- [Niamh] Mmm. Tastes like childhood.
- [LJG] I'd let you know...
You're drinking milk!
Something has been -
- [Ryan] Ugh, Jesus, what is that?
- [Niamh] It's kind of refreshing.
- [Sarah] Oh my God, it's so sugary and gross!
- [Ryan] I'd reckon if you put that into corn flakes,
the corn flakes would leave the bowl.
- [George] This is just rice!
- [LJG] Jesus, rice milk is where it's at!
- [Niamh] Did - like, how do you get milk from a rice?
- [LJG] Yeah, keep the milk in the cow! You don't need it anymore!
- [George] Do cows not need to be milked or they'll explode, or something?
Ugh, that's a dumb thing to say. *laughs*
- [Ryan] I couldn't drink that. That would make me sick.
- [LJG] ...and I'm happy to do it!
- [Niamh] Yeah, I'd go "ricey".
- [George] That's really nice.
- [Ryan] That one.
- [Niamh] Oh, my! Let me have a look!
Okay.
- [LJG] I'd say that one's vegan, is it?
Well, Jesus, no, I'd say that one's vegan!
- [Sarah] Turkey is white.
That is yellow.
- [Ryan] Tastes like nothing, that one.
- [LJG] That's not meat.
- [Niamh] It's definitely something that's been prep - made in a lab! *laughs*
- [Sarah] ...I don't know what that looks like.
- [Ryan] And maybe I'm just going mad, but I can't actually taste anything.
- [LJG] I don't hear a - *laughs*
the spirit of a cow!
*imitates animal noise*
- [George] Sandwich number two!
This is also my lunch, by the way.
- [LJG] I feel me arteries -
filling up... with guilt!
- [Sarah] *singing* Mmm, I love meat!
- [Ryan] This is a bad ham sandwich. I don't know who made this.
- [O.S.] *laughs*
- [Ryan] You made this, didn't it?
- [LJG] The smell! *snaps* Straight away!
- [George] That mayonnaise was really nice.
So I'm-a choose the vegan one.
- [Ryan] I pick the vegan one.
- [LJG] *quietly* That one?
- [Niamh] *imitates plate sliding*
- [Ryan] "Hot dog!"
- [George] I'm so glad I haven't eaten anything today!
- [Sarah] This is great; this is like a little barbecue!
- [LJG] I'd swear I could smell it already!
- [Niamh] Mum! Dad! I'm smelling hot dogs! On the internet!
- [Ryan] You really "went to town" on the ketchup, didn't yous?
- [Niamh] Mmm.
- [George] That's definitely meat...
- [Niamh] I taste, like, your standard, kinda, microwaved frankfurter.
No offense.
- [Sarah] That's so delish, though!
- [George] Now to you, my weird... brown...
"finger of mystery".
That's a weird phrase!
- [Ryan] *moans*
- [Niamh] That's weird, like!
- [George] It's weird to bite into a hot dog and not taste hot dog.
- [Sarah] It tastes not nice.
- [Niamh] I'm sorry, vegans!
- [LJG] I'd say there's more of a meat flavour to that one!
- [George] To honour the cow or pig that died to make that,
I shall choose you.
- [Niamh] I gotta go "meat dog".
- [Sarah] *laughs* Just the plate, yeah?
- [Ryan] It was that one.
- [LJG] I'm pushing that one forw - I'm letting that one in!
That's in me heart now! Literally, without giving me heart disease!
- [George] Is this right, or have you lost your mind?
- [LJG] What'd you do, rob a... rob a child's bedroom?
- [Ryan] This smells more poisonous -
so I presume an animal's been blended in there somewhere. *laughs*
- [LJG] *whispers* Sweets.
- [George] Dead cows, why you so delicious all the time, in all of your forms?
- [LJG] A meat-head'd love this. Yeah?
- [O.S.] Yeah.
After a big bowl of meat.
- [Ryan] These are really, really chewy.
- [LJG] It'd be half an hour chewing that!
- [Sarah] They're really sweet, and they just get stuck in your teeth, and -
why don't you just eat a burrito, like?
- [Niamh] Just gotta dive right in. He's cute!
- [George] Okay, these ones are different!
- [Niamh] Mmm!
- [Sarah] Oh! What? What just happened? *laughs*
- [George] There's more of a fruit taste off of them.
- [Ryan] They're so weird!
- [Niamh] It's not as chewy as a normal jelly.
- [Sarah] And these, you'd - they'd - you'd just slice right through them!
- [O.S.] Then...
- [Sarah] Like a big - *imitates explosion*
- [George] These ones are getting eaten.
- [Niamh] They taste better.
- [LJG] I think you'd go with them.
- [Ryan] Oh, yeah. I so - I still prefer them way more, like.
- [George] I was surprised! I didn't think I'd like vegan stuff.
- [Sarah] I was pleasantly surprised!
- [Ryan] Who cares? I don't give a sh** if you eat vegan food.
It's all - it's all "better". Fair enough, like.
I just, uh - I just love meat, that's the end of it.
- [George] Just everybody chill out, alright?
The food was nice. Nobody's starti - writing hate letters.
- [Ryan] I knew - I knew a vegan. She was vegan for years and then she had
meat once by accident again. *laughs*
And she just got the taste of it again, went -
"I can't do it anymore"!
- [O.S.] *laughs*
