-I'm happy you came on the show.
-I know. This is so weird.
-I haven't seen you in a while.
I think the last time I saw you
was -- you were in a band.
-Yes. You were at
a Pizza Underground band.
Or a concert, rather.
It was my Velvet Underground
cover band.
-Yeah.
-We replaced all the lyrics
with pizza.
So it would be like, you know,
"take a bite of the wild slice."
-No, yeah, I loved it.
I was at a pizzeria opening
in Brooklyn,
and they said
"The Pizza Underground is here."
And I hear bizarre stories about
you and things and I go,
"There's no way Macaulay Culkin
is in a Velvet Underground
cover band
where all they sing about
is pizza,"
and yet it was true.
That's what actually happened.
You were there and it was great.
I loved it.
-Yeah, it was a fun run.
-What are the most
other bizarre things
have you heard about yourself?
-Oh.
I die all the time.
[ Laughter ]
-Congratulations.
-I know. Right?
[ Laughter ]
-I'm happy you're here.
-I know.
I'm just a specter right now.
-That must be awful.
-It can be.
I always, like --
I used to see as fun
until it would affect
other people.
But for the most part, like --
The first time it happened,
it was my lawyer called me up
and he said --
and I was like 15, 16.
And he says,
"Hey, Mac, is this you?"
I go, "Yeah."
He goes, "Oh, okay.
Just checking, 'cause CNN
just said you were dead.
All right, bye."
-"Talk to you later, buddy.
Thank you for calling."
-I was like, "Cool. Yep, yep.
There you go."
-"Made my day. Thanks, pal.
Appreciate it."
-So now I can
set my watch to it.
It happens at least
once or twice a year.
I hit that great strike zone
of just reasons why they want --
-Isn't that bizarre?
-I don't know.
People want to kill me.
-No, no. That's not true.
I just think you've lived
a very interesting life
and you're part of all of
our lives and we love you.
And we grew up with you, so we
want to make sure you're safe.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Make sure you're still here.
We love you.
You're real!
-You want to swaddle me.
Just swaddle me.
I'll be okay.
-Papa?
No, I'm just kidding.
I want to talk to you
about "Home Alone,"
because this has to be it,
obviously.
-Why?
-Well, just 'cause --
You have ever seen the movie?
[ Laughter ]
Anyways, I wanted to know if
you hear any of the conspiracy
theories around "Home Alone,"
what people have said.
There's so many, like,
crazy things about it.
Do you know what
I'm talking about?
-I've heard some.
There's the --
Oh, that I'm Jigsaw.
That Kevin McCallister grew up
to be Jigsaw from "Saw."
And that's how he learned --
-I've never heard that one.
-Yeah.
I've heard that one.
There's also the Elvis one.
-This one, I kind of --
I got to say, I checked it out,
and it's pretty much real.
-That's one of
the earliest ones. Yeah.
-They said Elvis
is actually in the movie
as an extra in "Home Alone."
And if you see the scene
where Catherine O'Hara's
at the airport
trying to change her tickets,
her plane tickets.
Look at this.
Tell me
this doesn't look like --
[ Laughter ]
-Totally Elvis. Right?
-Yeah, man.
At that point, that's probably
what he would wear,
like a turtleneck and blazer.
Makes total sense to me.
-I didn't realize Elvis turned
into Richard Karn.
[ Laughter ]
-That's a good
Richard Karn reference.
-I know, right?
That's a deep cut.
-It is a deep cut.
Looking back, is there
anything that you would change
or any question you have about
the movie or the plot or --
-Oh, just -- I mean, okay.
This kid's a really clever kid,
right?
But these guys
are about to break in.
Why doesn't he
just call the cops?
I mean, like,
he makes a master plan.
He uses Micro Machines.
But, like, for real.
There's landlines.
I mean, there's no cellphones,
but still.
I think that's
an enormous plot hole.
But I don't actually spend my
days thinking about it, though.
-No, you really don't?
-That was just the only one
I could think of right now.
-I do. Yeah, I do. Sadly.
I want to talk to you
about this podcast,
-Yes.
-Bunnyears.com.
-Yes, yes.
-And it's a website.
-I have a Website and a podcast
and all that kind of fun stuff.
Highly recommend it.
-It made me laugh.
How do you describe it?
What is it?
-It's kind of like
Goop meets the Onion.
It's a lifestyle kind of thing.
I realized there was
a hole in the market
of kind of just poking fun at it
and at the same time
being informative.
-Yeah.
-So it is that.
-I was playing on the site
today.
This is a screenshot
of the website.
It says, "Exclusive:
Macaulay Culkin
Interviews The Swarm of Bees
From My Girl."
[ Laughter ]
-It's a real article.
[ Laughter ]
-I mean, that was a very
emotional interview, too.
-Right? Oh, yeah.
It was hard-hitting.
-It was hard-hitting.
-It stung.
-Oh, nice, nice!
That's what I'm talking about.
You know, I wanted to put --
-Oh, yeah.
-Your editor caps.
-Yes, this is my --
this is my thinking cap.
Actually, yours is even better.
Hold on.
I can do that.
Yeah.
You don't look ridiculous.
-Am I lighting up right now?
-Lighting up a little bit.
-Can we dim the lights?
-Oh, yeah.
-Oh, man.
-Now we're talking.
-Now we're talking, yeah.
Let's talk about Bunnyears.
-After dark.
-After dark.
I want to ask you about this.
'Cause this is kind of a big --
[ Laughter ]
-What?
-What's the problem? This is
normal television, you guys.
-Yeah.
-This is a big announcement
that you're about to make.
You're finally branching out
onto social media.
-Yes. I just started, like,
a Twitter like today.
And an Instagram.
-I love this.
-I know.
I'm living in the now.
-You are living in the now.
I will say on Twitter,
you're @incredibleculk.
On Instagram,
are you @culkamania?
-Yes, I'm @culkamania
on Instagram.
-So @culkamania is --
-Yes.
[ Laughter ]
What?
-I think it's great, man.
I know, because you're
a wrestling fan.
-Yes. Yes, I am.
I think you're a recent convert,
aren't you?
-I am. I actually am.
I am so into wrestling.
But you go to, like,
underground wrestling stuff.
-Yes, I do.
-This is what makes --
We're just different people.
You know? You go to
underground wrestling things.
-I wear bunny ears.
-You wear bunny ears.
-I want to show everyone a clip.
You were at this
wrestling match,
and then you decided
to get in the ring.
-Yes.
-Watch this.
There you go.
Oh, you "Home Alone'd" it!
[ Cheers and applause ]
[ Laughter ]
Did Santa Claus throw you?
-Santa Claus just threw me, yes.
-Whoo!
-Two, three -- oh!
[ Cheers and applause ]
You "Home Alone'd" it.
-Yeah, I "Home Alone'd" it.
-You Kevin McCallister'd
the balls,
and then Santa Claus
threw you on top of it.
I just think you're fun.
I think it's great.
-He just walked up and he was
like, "I'm gonna toss you."
And I'm like, "All right."
Just like, "Let's do this."
The whole time, I'm like,
you know, just talking [bleep]
I'm talking bad words.
Yes, I'm just talking smack
to all the wrestlers
and all that kind of stuff.
[ Laughter ]
-What?
-We both said smack way to loud.
Talking --
-Both: Smack!
[ Laughter ]
-So, yeah.
So, like,
the whole time I'm there,
we're antagonizing each other
and then just out of nowhere
I just jump into the ring,
and she is just gobsmacked.
It's amazing.
So, yeah. I'm also an amateur
wrestler now, apparently.
I'm an indie amateur wrestler.
-Have you taken a selfie yet?
-I have zero pictures
on my Instagram.
Let's do this.
-Should we do this?
-Hell yeah.
All right, let's see.
-All right, do you know how to
use the phone?
-Yeah, I think I know how to use
the phone part.
[ Laughter ]
Everyone say normal.
-Normal.
-There we go.
-All right, you want to show
people what it looks like.
Well, I guess you saw it.
[ Laughter ]
All right, so you're gonna --
That's your first selfie.
-Yes.
-I am honored.
Macaulay Culkin, everyone.
Check out his new website,
bunnyears.com.
