I mean, I did an event.
This when I first got to
CNN and did "United Shades,"
there was like a "Hollywood
Reporter," a round table,
a reality television round table.
And this was, I mean, this was years ago,
and you'll know how it was years ago.
They called me to do it and they said
that Tony Bourdain was gonna be there.
And I was like, "Oh, well
I'll definitely do it"
'cause I hadn't met him yet.
I'd had the show in New
York City for a year.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, right.
And I was like, great.
I get to hang out with Tony.
I haven't met him and
I've been a fan of his
since before I had the show.
And then I got there and it was a bunch
of other reality television people.
And I got there and Tony
is standing on the corner
talking to the publicist from CNN
and she's this little, tiny lady
and he's this tall guy and
she's like pointing in his face
like clearly sort of like browbeat.
Like, looking like a
teacher talking to a student
who just failed, and I
expected more of you.
And he just sort of looks like, eh.
And then I walk up like, "Hey, man."
He's like, "Yeah, I
gotta go," and he leaves.
What?
And then I walk in
and he just doesn't, so
he doesn't do the event.
And I walk in she's like,
"He had some previously
scheduled business."
And I'm like, "I can tell
a lie when I hear it."
(laughing)
And then I walk into where
we're recording the interview,
and I walk past the green room
that has everybody's
name on a piece of paper.
And one of them says, Kris Kardashian.
And I was like, oh shit.
'Cause I knew he hated the Kardashians.
Right.
And I'm like,
he left 'cause Kris Kardashian,
'cause I didn't know
Kris Kardashian was gonna be there either.
And I think she got
booked at the last minute,
and he's like, I can't sit.
And I found out he was like,
"I can't sit at a table with a member
of the Kardashian family.
Wow.
Right, and he just walked out.
He just bounced, and I just thought
it was one of the greatest
things of all time
that I would even now--
Wait a minute, wait a minute
wait a minute, greatest
things of all time.
All time, I have my
list of greatest things
of all time.
(Sona and Conan laughing)
I want to hear the other
greatest things of all time.
I had a bowl of cereal this morning.
And the almond milk to pecan
ratio was really perfect.
I think I really nailed it.
(Conan and Sona laughing)
I have a bunion on my foot
that's healing up nicely.
Wow.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So these beat the discovery
of fire as a way to, okay.
I wasn't there for that so
maybe it wasn't that great.
(Conan laughing)
I saw Anthony Bourdain
leave seeing his publicist
because he didn't want to
stomach Kris Kardashian.
I saw that happen and I was like,
that dude knows who he is,
and I wish I had that much integrity.
Anyway, I'ma go in there
and talk to Kris Kardashian.
(laughing)
And at the end of this event
it was like me, RuPaul, her,
some other people, Leah Remini.
Kris Kardashian gave everybody gift bags.
Oh.
Which I was like,
handed everybody and it was--
Wait and she's just invited,
I mean, she's not hosting
the thing, she's not--
No, she really just
showed us all up to go,
"You didn't bring a gift bag?"
Wow.
"I brought gift bags."
And she had gift bags of whatever
Kylie's new lip kit was--
(laughing)
Oh, well wait,
that's not really a gift bag.
I mean, it was makeup
that was hard to get and--
Yeah, my father
has a brick business,
here's a brick. (laughs)
(laughing)
It's got the name of my
father's brick business on it.
I still had not ever seen anybody hand out
random gift bags that weren't
a kid's birthday party
or a wedding so I was pretty
impressed at the time.
And she was like, "Give
this to your wife."
And I was like, how does
she know I have a wife?
Like, they have like,
do you have a dossier?
Like, why do you?
Oh my God.
